Indian chieftain. [volume] (Vinita, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1882-1902, 1885-06-04
BAGPIPES.
A Natural Interpretation Not Justified by
the Facts.

A Natural Interpretation Not justified by
the Facts.
IL appears that il is all a mistake ia
assume that oatmeal is the cause Of the
national Scotch dyspepsia. The natur-
al Interpretation Of the facts that the
Scotch eat oatmeal and suffer from dys-
pepsia is that oatmeal produces dyspep-
sia- When the Times expressed this
opinion it did so in perfect good faith
but now that real Scotchman. who is
an expert in dyspepsia, not only denies
! that oatmeal is indigestible, but ex-
| plains in a perfect satisfactory way the
true cause Of Scotch dyspepsia, ii would
be dishonest not TO proclaim the inno-
cence OF oatmeal. Dyspepsia among
ScotchmeD IS the result OF listening to
the 1agpipes, and the moment this as
sertion is made its truth becomes almost
/ self-ev.dent
II may be urged by ignorant persons
that the impression Of a sound received
on the tympanum OF the ear can not
affect the stomach. This is, Of course.
entirely untrue. Ii is well-estabished
fact that certain songs will produce
nausea on the pat Of sensitive hearers.
EXcursionist, on their way 10 Rock
away by sea have often been made yio-
lently sick by hearing the steamers $
band play "Whoa, Emma and a
physician Of this city has frequently
prescribed 'Dites lui' as an emetic in
eases of poisoning.
IL Is Well-attested fact that the bag
pipes, when beard by persons who are
not accustomed TO them. give rise to
violent gripping pains in the stomach
which closely resemble the pains OF
Asiatic cholera During the Sepoy mu-
tiny the Scotch regiments more than
once placed large bodies Of SepOys bors
de combat by The use Of the bagplpes
alone. Had not Hayelock's little army
included strong corps of pipers Il
could never have made its way into
Lucknow through the vast bes'eging
force. Mr.. Whittier speaks Of the pipes
at Lucknow as "stinging all the plain
to life. The Sepoys would hardly have
described in that way the effect OF pipe
playing. As a matter OF fact, thousands
Of rebels. as soon as they heard the
bagpipes, clasped their hands 10 their
abdominal regions aud rolled on the
plain in agony. Even those whose
stomach, withstood the sound imagined
that the SepOy camp had suddenly been
smitten with cholera, aud became 80
demoralizcd that Haveloek forced his
way through the midst of them almost
ummOlestcd, and reached the residency
without other casualties than the death
of two wounded Englishmen, who were
officially reported TO have died with joy
at seeing the relieving force, but who
were really too weak TO withstand tho
bagpipes.
Scottish children suffer severely from
the bagpipe collie, aud no careful
mother will allow a baby IN arms TO
hear the pipes. Whom the Scotch chIl-
dren reach the age OF three or four
years they are gradually hardened to
the sound Of the bagpipes, and though
at first they are fairly doubled up with
pan they are able in time to
listen 10 "The Wild MeGregor Clam
CALI without betraying any signs Of
The bagpipe cole Is never
fatal except b infants and persons in a
very weak condition, and Scotch |
physicians occasionally prescribe a
course OF pipes 10 patients suffering |
from obesity. Her Majesty the Queen |
has tried this remedy with apparently |
good results, though il is difficult TO he
lieye that It's permanent effect upon her
health can be beneficial
No man, not even a Scotchman, can
suffer for years from collie without hav-
ing his digestive organs impaired
When young Scotchman has accus-
toned his stomach to hear bagpipes
Without pain II may be safely assumed
that his stomach Is so weakened as 70
be totally unfit TO digest ordinary food
In these circumstances II Is possible tina,
oatmeal Is well adapted TO the abnor.
NAL state OF his digestive organs. AZ
any rate, oatmeal can no longer be held
10 be the cause of Scotch dyspepsia,
and there Is good reason 10 believe that
Carlyle owed his dyspepsia 10 his early
exposure 10 bagpipes y Times.
- 80
Two fishermen Of Tampa, Fla
ately captured sawlsh. said u b
he largest ever caught Ia Tampa BlA
I WAS sixteen feet three inches l1nf
TX foot wide, and weighed vel no