Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-08-02
BRIGHT BITS.


A NEW YORK PAPER has discovered a most
unusual belle" in whisting girl. She
should be taken a few miles out to sea and
anchored alongside Of o whistling buoy
N09'ristoa0n Herald.
COMPRESSED CAS- is TO be used for lighting
railroad cars. We don't see how it can be any
more compressed than il is now in an ordinary
meter, which apparently holds several cubic
yards TO the foot.-L07oeU Courier.
THE revised version of the Old Testament
does not make it entirely clear why Lots lie
turned aud looked back. hence we shall hold
to our preconcelved notion that some other
woman must have gone by with a new bonnet
on.-LOtoeT Citisets
BBOwN-''What a sad looking fellow Smith
is! What is the matter with him. wOuder?"
Fogg why, didn't YOU ever hear? He was
disappointed in love" Brown-"Got the
mitten, eh?' Fogg-"Oh dear, no; he mar
red her. "-Boston II aassorjDt.
"WHAT and When to Eat" is the title of an
article In an exchange. This is subject on
which we are posted. The "when" never
gave us any trouble in all our eating, but we
have been compelled to do a laundering sight
OF skirmishing after the ''what."-Nea0nldn
Independent.
IN CUBA, when the government wants to
discipline an editor il suspends his paper for
forty days. This is great fun for the editor.
lie gets rest. goes fishing, has a good time
generally, and his subscribers can't recover a
cent for the papers they didn't get .-BurJ5fsg-
ton Free Press.
W. G.. SEARS, the Chattanooga engineer
has invented new cotton picker. What the
public IL anxious TO know Is whether il will
pick the shreds of cotton out of a mans nous
tache and beard after he had wiped his
mouth with cheap restaurant napkin.-Mie-
7eeaD0lis Tribune.
THE Detroit Free Press has discovered that
one may study she camel for ten years and
learn something every day. We would sug-
gest that the editors of some Blaniac news
papers turn their attention to the camel,
They do not seem to be able to learn anything
any other way.-fNcb.
AN Italian scientist says that "wrinkles de
pend mainly on the fgsctcuH which form the
reticular part OF the deFmis." We ALWAYS
supposed that age had more 10 do with il than
the fascfeu@ Persons who would escape
wrinkles, Ii would seem, must first get rid of
that italic thing.-Norrist0aCn HsrGld.
CLOVIS yer boy gettin' erlong, Jasper?'
ken talk right smart now, KANT hep
Talk right smart? Wy you oughter heah
dat chlle open his moui. Talk? Wy / tell
yer wut he ken do. He ken talk through one
of desc hesh tillyfOnes." $50 way. now"
ION, it's er fack-n Yer dOan tell me sou
'.Cose does" Talk through er tellyfone,
ehY" "Jes' like teile yer. Eff dat boy dOan
grow up ter be er lawyer, IN jes AK somebody
TO tell me der reason wy; OATS whut I'll do. %
-Arkdasds0 IFdgeIer.
"WHBRE are the American poets?'' an
English critic demands. Where are the
American poetsS Why. bless your soul, they
are everywhere and their name is legion
! You will dud one in nearly every newspaper
office in the United States. with his machine
rugged up 10 the corner Of his room ready at
a moments notice u respond TO the call for
| copy, and great many more besides chained
in the basement dungeons under the press
rooms ready to be let lOOse when occasion de-
mauds None or your You, you" poets.
either, such AS the English make laureaIes of,
/ but real bona lde ''yi vi" poets. all wool and
| a yard widc and closely woven ut that
| Who're are the American poets? You should
rather ask, where is the American that isn't
| poet?
The Nine have removed their abode from
Parnassus
To our sky kissing mountains, their health
to repair,
And we beg to assure English critics, who
sass us,
That they're growing quite fat on American
air. Boston COUrssr.
Terrell county Is making an excellent
| crop OF field peas.