The Northern Pacific farmer. [volume] (Wadena, Minn.) 1878-1885, 1885-10-01
A Lecture on huggin9.

"Vat you doing at lie dore, 1ke?'
exclaimed Solomon angr:ly. Ivy don't
you stayi in the store and fix those
shoes vat vas all o!cr the counter?"
Il shust been here little vile Mis-.
der Solomon replied Ike. 'Some
nice young ladies vas Walking along
de street und I thinks would go to de
door und look at DEM"
''Vell, don't pay you wages for dot
kind uf work, you know. Meier mind
dc girls ven you got pisiness, but stay
de store in; I will tell you someding
Vonce two leetle poys stop in de street
und look in q shop window we're dere
vas nice fresh pies. Vun of the leetle
poys says: Dose vas beautiful pies,
Billie md Billy, rubbed his nose nit
de back Of his hand und he says: Yes,
Johnny, dey vas mighty nice pies, but
dey wasn't for u.s. Den de leetle poys
locked at de pies vunce more, und 60
away und wish dey vas dead. 1t vas
the sar,e way nit you, Ike. You can
look, but you dou't get de pies. you
know. All de time you want to make
love NIT de girls und you
don't tink uf nyding else. Dis morn
ing ven dot man from Cairo vas in de
store You vent and sold him bair uf
: dose Russian ledder shoes vot cost six
bits for two dollars. ven if you don't
hat been linking of the girls more as
you do uf de pisiness you would have
mad dat man bay dree dollars for de
shoes. !: De money vat you lost l hope
to make up ven sell him de suit OF
blue jeans, you know. You will never
take init dc girls, Ike, because you
look like Your fader, und he vas so
ugly dot he used to fall down and hat
fit eferytcme he sees looking-glass.
Ven he died de only din g he left you
vas his looks und an old peddler's
wagon, und de best for you to do vas
to stick to de pisincss und let de girls
60 way. Vile you vas valtzing around
NIT Rachel lsaacs und spending your
money, she Vas making fun at you NIT
de oder girls. She tells my wife dot if
you vas to get lost in de woods dot
you would :nefcr starve to dead, be-
cause your head vas so red dot de
vood.peckers would feed you. All uf
de tlnje dot you%@vas making love to
Rachel lsaacs, und tink dot you would
marry her.. she vas engaged to Jake
Steinmitz; und he will get old man
1saac's money, you know. will tell
you someding. Ven you vas counting
girl, hug her tho FIRST chance you
| get. md she ). will dink more of you.
Dot vas de reason I vas so popular NIT
de girls ven I vas 3 youog man.. Won
hat de, men IL de world dent hat any
idea. Ike, uf De right way uf bugging
girl. Der was shust as much art in
huegin as dere vas in ANGLING else.
Ven you vas counting always sit on de
right-hand side uf de girl, sund ven
you dink do coast vas clear, shust slip
your left hand around her neck und
let it drop on her left shoulder, you
know. Den you tell de girl, she vas
de sweetest girl in de world und draw
her up easy, Ike, until her head rests
on; your shoulder. Den you put your
right, arn, around her waist und bring
her closer, und my gracious, your
toes draw up und you will feel 20 hap
| py dot You will shut your eyes und
Sdink youvas harp NIT dousand
strings. Ven you want to kiss, her,
shust lift her chin up easy, you know.
Ike, NIT you left hand until you can
get at her sweet :leetle mout mitout
| sticking her nose In your eye. DEN
you shust kiss nor lips long und easy.
und before you hat been der dree
seconds you hears leetls birds singing
up in dc trees, you secs beautiful flow.
err, und drinks you vas floating fal
away. Whoopi my gracious, Ike
feels I vas 81 young man vonce more
ven talks shout Dake my advice.
und ven youmeets anoder girl vot hats
/ money, hing hsrj, soon q possible, und
1 ven you do il. don't aet g Il you ~.
lifting 8 saw-log. Be easy ind nice,
4 you skioh. 81. Lostis IHlIiip.
Ice = worth tan cents 8 poand 6 Key IVES