davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
The Death of the aged Gag.
From, the chicago inter ocean.

EFCf" tte GNttAbp lHttf f'CcttNs
Two stage hands entered the room, sup
porting the figure OF a weather-beaten joke.
"Oh, Pm here" he hoarsely whispered, look
ing pitlfully mp into the managers face with
wan smile, ready to 90 on, even II it's for
the last time. Never disappoint the public
he murmured softly. Then his eyes closed,
and he lay very still. The manager bent over
him and chated his hands, while the others
applied restoratives. PPM better now,r SAID
the aged Gag, as he sat up and gazed feeblY
about. "Ah. there's my cue. I'm going on.
Let me pass2' a second later we heard from
the interlOcutOr; And so you say that you
were eating an egg while everybody else on
board the vessel was starving?"
u was, replied the End Man.
And where did you get the egg ?"
The ship lay TO-, and got one"
Then mist came before the ewes of the old
Gag; he staggered back into the wings and
fell. S0bbing Conundrums bore him t. nderly
to his dressing room, and weeping Jokes I'M
plored MIN to open his eyes. It was too late.
The sound of laughter ana applause came
from the auditorium. smile OF lnedable
sweetness lit up his face and faded away for
ever. The old Gag was dead.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

~ never lie about snakes" Warren replied,
"but a much more curious and decidedly
larger reptile was captured back Of Lacka-
waNcn last Tuesday. DO YOU remember that
about three years ago collision occurred on
the Delaware division to a train carrying
O'drien's circus and menagerie, and that the
snake cage was demolished and two or three
snakes escaped IN the darkness. Wei, one Of
these snakes was an anaconda, "a feet
long, and although it has been seen on several
occasions was never captured. Last Monday
a Turk wearing red turban hat, knee and
baggy breeChes, aud "A pair OF atOcKtugs but
no shoes, arrived at LackawaXen and injured
the way 10 ShOhola Fails. Tie started out,
but losing his way found himself late al night
alougside Of "kattlesnake Creek tired out,
and no house or shelter within sight. The
night was very chilly. and the Turk finally
luid down on mossy bank and went TO
sleep. The next morning two trout fisher
men, who had taken an early start, were
amazed 10 discOver the Turk lying in "a stupor
while huge Shiny, but beautifully striped
snake was in the act Of ondeayuring 20 swnl q
low him whole. When the fishermen
arrived the snake had one of the
Turks legs swallowed to n point above the
knee, and was making but slow progress,
having undertaken a bigger lob than 10 eN-
pected. The fishermen had no difficulty IA
killing the snake, as they had II at u disad-
vantage, being unable 10 get any further
ahead or back out lt was 10 feet long.
and the identical anaconda which escaped
from O'Brien's circus three years ago.
liompy Williams, the celebrated snake
eharmcr Of LackawaNen, Will preserve and
mount It, this being the only anaconda ever
discovered Ia Pike county,
"WhAt become Of the Turk WARREN" was
the next question.
"oh. be came around an right. BY yigor-
Gus rubbing with whisky circulation WAS re-
stored In his leg. snd be- was able to resume
me Journey tue same dar. lie WIS supplied
W IN u pair ~ boots. the natives being fearful
that he would be bitten by a RATHER and that
they would then be com nolled to bury him. ~
NE was unable q purchase u bottle u rattle
snake antidOic. fts cheauer 10 buy boots
than coins ana dix graves
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The interesting announcement has been
telegraphed 10 several places in the coun.
try that John Il. Mclean, tho well-known
"kid' boss Of Cincinnati, has announced
himself unequiyocally for Hoadly for
Governor and for Thurman for the United
States Senate. This indicates that the
Democrats Of Ohio will be united in the
coming campaign, aud, therefore, will be
very apt 20 carry the state. No doubt the
drubbines Mclean has received from the
Democratic press in different portions Of
the Union since the last election have
done him good.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The report comes from Washington
that Assistant Postmaster General Ste
ycnson was almost worn out on his inau-
gurntion day, 80 great was the pressure
Of business in his Office. II Is 10 be re-
gretted that the Democratic officials are
forced to do double duty for the time, but
IL is gratifying to know that they are not
trying to shirk any work or responsibility
that properly fall on them.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The story is now going the rounds in
New York that Gen. Logan admitted sub.
stantially some time ago that the reason
the Republicans did not buy out st. John
in the late campaign was because he
could not deliver the goods. Perhaps the
real reason that Logan did not buy the
members Of the Illinois Legislature who
were in the market was because he did
not have the money.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
Btnnrn TO Zngfs.

MONEY TO LOAN.-If you are ~ need Of
vi money, and want a liberal loan on al
most any thing OF value, aud il You don't want
to be seen by your friends when you get it. or
have remarks made that You are in need Of
money by crowds Of people prOtnsnadi1g and
passing the paWnshOp and watching you when
you go in or out. then call at the old reliable
Private Pawnbroker House, 1871 CONGRESS
body win know your business. <. MUHL
BERG. Manager. L-l-L
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
No Privileged Class Manted.

ReD York Times lMug.l
Inc idea OF making competitive eXamina-
lions the only means of entering the civil SER
wee o. tne United states, and OF eudoWng
qinceholders wath perm Anenttcnure, Is anti
democratic and anti-AmgTIcan. We 10 not
want privileged class OF OilGehUlders supe-
rior 70 the people, aud We trust that not only
the Democrattc State convention Of ohio, but
other political conventions and meetings. VIII
AT no distant day adopt unmlstakable express
siOns upon the subject
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
AHorrlfiod American Mlnister.


IL Is not part OF an American Minister'S
duty TO act ~ social sponsor for ambitious
nobOdies. or 20 Introduce at court people who
do not know how TO behave when they get
there. A once too-easi IMpcrauaded Minister
yielded 10 the teasing q { Iuc of hts country
women and presented her at the court OF one
OF the continental nations. The Queen re-
ceived her most kindly, but. SAYS the narrator
of the anecdote. judge OF the Minister'S hor-
ror when. 20 her Maretys Kind welcome. the
American woman replied. ~ really feel as II
had known you long time; you know we
10 TO the same chirOpOdist."
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
ADVERTISING.

Ten lines make a square - line averages
seven words. Advertisements per square,
one insertion, 81 90; two Insertions 81 ~
Reduced rates on continued advertisements
Local or Reading Notices double rates
Auction advertisements. Marriages, Funerals,
Meetings and Special Notices II W per
square each Insertion.
Wants. Boarding. For Rent, Lost and founu;
10 cents line. No advertisement inserted
under these headings for less than ~ cents.
Amusement advertisements 81 so per square,
Special rates for Weekly Ne1os.
We do not insure the insertion OF any aoVer-
tisement on any specified day or days nor
do we insure the number of Insertions
within the time required by the advertiser.
Advertisements viii, however have their
full number Of Insertions when the Time
can be inside up, but when accidentally
left out and the number Of insertions eau
not be given, the money paid for the omit
ted insertions will be returned TO the al
Vertlspr-
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
He Was strnirht.
From the Merchant 7TaueIer.

TFVIII ttc IIIlFtV ttI0'I'
Johnny had fistcuf with one Of his play
mates and was pommellng he other young
ster vigorously when mis- mother happened
on the scene and stopped the performance.
You naughty, naughty boyW she sald f;
you ought TO be ashamed Of yourself
Gle strJck me first" sobbeJ Johnny.
THAT has nothing to do with it, and it is no
excuse at al. Don't you know the Bible says
when you are struck on one cheek you
should turn the Others"
"N es. UNI. "
Then why didn't you do that, you naughty
boy?"
"Cause 1 amt no Mugwumpw And the
boy argument saved HIM.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

Secretary whitney b. the happy possessor
OF q pony. The other day when he was
taking his eiesta, and humm ing tn q light and
airy manner few lines of PinHfore, the
stabeman appeared aud said:
''Iho ponyie name Is getting little long,
had not better cut and roach itfn
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

Since few cowboys frightened half the
people of Kansas out Of their wits by a
rather thin story about an alleged Indian
invasion, it IS TO be feared that the cow
boys will loose theirreputation for veraci-
ty and the Kansas people their reputa-
tiOn for valOr.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

Sanitary house building is now engag-
ing the attention OF great many people.
lmpermeable floors are now regarded asin-
dispensabie features IN houses construct
cd on hygienic principles. They must
be SO treated that the wood cannot absorb
moisture; rough places must be made
smooth, and such cracks or depresslons
as give rise TO the smallest Accommodations
OF dust are not permissible. This is what
the scientists say. II is nevertheless
true, that the healthiest people in the
world live In log cabins with rough floors.
and with plenty ofcraoks for the admission
OF lresh air.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
CURRENT COMMENT.
The PennsrIvanIn Plntrorm.

<hftddskph5d Times iIrd.)
1 mere Is t3east one thing unique abOnt the
republican platform. 1t can be worshlped
without exposing its yOtaries to the charge Of
luolatry. IL is rot like any thng IN the heav-
ems or on the earth, or in the waters under
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

It is stated that OF the 1, 400 or 1900 EN-.
ployes in the New York custom house,
about 350are enlarged" 10 leading Repub-
Leans rs follows Senator Logan -, Mr..
Blaine go. Senator Sherman 81, Senator
Cameron q, Senator Warner Miller Is,
ex-President Arthur II. ex-Collector Mer-
rift rs, johnny OBrien 10, ",Jakev
Patterson IL, ex-Collector Robertson 10,
ex-Gov. Cornell II. Reuben l.. Fenton 10.
Wen, it is just about time to balance the
books. Let these employees be now dis
charged and give the leading Republicans
due credit 10 square up their accounts.
They have been running open accounts,
billeting their supporters on the govern
ment long enough. BY the way, are any
Of the leading Republicans named Ciy1
Service Commissioners
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
IYhen John b Dangerons.

'f''e|'V|SU DtSp1tC" lDe"''i
Jonn sherman threatens to throw himself
mo NO lHe Ohlo campaign with all his heart, but
wren we remember the size Of Johns blood
pump ms language does not amount 10 much.
~ p When John jumps into a thing with all
MS heartlessness that he m cans business.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
gOnt ann gnl,nn

I OST, on the steamer st. Nicholas yester-
II day, on the mOrnIng trip to gybee, a
brown HAND SATCHEL, containing several
pieces OF infants wearing apparel. The
finder Will confer favor by returning Il 10
this office. "QY6 0n"
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

1t appears that even some of the Mug
wumDs are beginning to admit that if a
man was appointed to Office because he
was Republican there is no earthly use
in raising a great howl if he is dismissed
because he is a Republican.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

1t seems that the only Republican
Senators that have so far made threats to
antagonize President Cleveland's APP
pointments are such notorious small
calibre statesmen as Hale, Frye, Hoar,
Mahone and Riddleberger. They are
recognized as the small, narrow-minded,
bitter men Of the Senate. The Republi-
can Senate will probably refuse TO con
firm very few Of the Presidents appoint
ments.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

DINE TIMBER FOR sALE.-I offer for
1 sale body of 5000 acres of good PINE
TIMBER near railroad. Address
j. IL. BAKER,
Alapaha, Ga.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The half-hearted Republicans of Penn
sylvania who Gid not support Quay, or
like his record, are receiving rather cold
comfort from the victorious machine or
gans. The Philadelphia NelcS SAYS: "The
beaten bosses and the malcontent Mug
wumps must now fall in line under the
Quay leadership or play into the hands Of
the honest Democrats who court no such
alliance. There is little hope, however,
OF their secession. The thunder of their
opposition has been stage thunder. Their
threats will moderate into whines and
their whines into silence. Here and there
Mugwump will bolt the nomination,
but they will be few and far between.
Let the Democrats nominate as good a
Democrat as Quay is Republican, and
let us have good, old-fashioned fight on
party lines. 1t will clear the political at
mosphere." a'Oor Press,
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
INDEX TO NEs ADVERTISEMENTS.

MEETINGs-Soutrern Mutual Loan AssOcia-
ton; German Friendly Society.
AUCTION SALEs-Sundries, by /. d. La
Roche's Sons: Groceries, Bacon, etc, and I'm
derwriters Sale, by J Mclaughlin ~ Son.
RAILROAD SCHEDULE Central and South
western Railroads.
STEAMSHIP p~DCLE-Baltmore Line.
WANTS-Pu ers for Watermelons.
LEA x = SAUCE-John Duncan's
Sons, New
EDUC ersity School, Peters
burg
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

ENOR oALE CHEAP, a Singer Sewing Ma
A chine. as good as new. Address MA
CHINE, this Office.
E7OR SALE. one carload of Clay Peas,
Il Call at w EST BROS. No. 2OS Bay street.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

LNOR RENT The very desirable ofliee ID
Il Bay street, fitted up for and originally oc-
cupied by, Andrew Low Co., will be rented
IN parts as may be desired at low rates. also
three warehouses on River street under aIove
office. Address VIM. l.. WAKELEE. PlO
box 2S4, Savannah, Ga. t-silf -
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
Gilbert 4 Co.
GOWNS Iron BitteIs.

eally cruel Of Queen Victoria not
wv her beloved subjects to sit on the
.ce and see the Princess Beatrice's
wedding procession march by.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The Sanitary Engineer says decaying
wood is an uuwholesome thing, because
it is great assistant in the propagation
OF yellow and typhoid fever germs. There
is no doubt that persons living in old di-
lapldated houses are more subject 10 dis
ease, other conditions being equal, than
those who live in sound buildings. The
mortality statistics Of nearly all our cities,
If properly arranged, would no doubt
prove this fact.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
Cor Sale.

LNOR SALE, q large lot OF Planed No
II Flooring, Ceiling and Weather boarding
at IS so per 1,OOo in yard; 10000 feet Of 8xq-5j
at IS so per LOCO in yard; Boards ut IS per 900
in yard; Scantllng at 81 per 1000 IN yard.
Lumber yard Taylor and East Broad streets.
REPPARD & co.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The circular of the Department Of
Agriculture Of Georgia for July reports
the condition and prospects Of the
cotton crop at % per cent. Of
an average crop, corn % per cent.
wheat yield 81, oat yield ", rice prospects
o., sweet potatoes %, sugar cane o.,
ground peas 93. Caterpillars arc reported
as having appeared at several places in
Southwest Georgia during the month of
June. The reports in regard % nearly
everything produced on the farm indicate
that there viii be from TO H. per cent
below average crops IN nearly every part
Of this State. Those who have been pre-.
dieting very large crops In Georgia this
year may as wen take their places among
tbe false prophets.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The SAVANNAH MORNING NEws-EN-
LARGED TO EIGHT PAGES, 90 COLUMNS,
AND ISSUED SEVEN DAYS N THE WEEK
~-wILL BE SENT FOR EXAMINATION, ONE
SoNTH, ON RECEIPT OF 81, OR THREE
IHs FOR 81 30.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The Cincinnati Commercial Gazette has
accidentally admitted a truth into It's
columns. 1t says: "Mr. Cleveland is not
an excessive drinker.n This sentence
must have escaped Mr.. Halsteads eagle
eye or the word "not" would have had
blue pencil mark across it in a twinkling.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

nor RENT, three (s) stores in "The Arse.
4 nal'' building; possession given Oct. /
1885. WILLIAM GARRARD, Chairman
Building Committee.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
Changes in the OmCes.

Changes in the Offices haven't been
made very rapidly, but they have been
made pretty constantly since the control
OF the government passed to the Demo-
Gratis.
Up to July 4 there had been 5,1OS
changes, and it is safe to say that there
are now nearly 5000 more Democrats in
the public service than there was four
months ago. There are still about $4,000
Republican Officeholders, however, and if
Republicans continue to be removed at
the rate they have been during the last
four months about half of them Will be
out of office by the end Of the present
administration.
II, however, the Democratic party re-
mains true TO its pledges, and admins ters
the government strictly IN the interest of
the people, it will remain in power long
enough to see about all the offices in the
hands of the Democrats.
OF course some Republicans will get
into the minor places under the civil SER
vice law, but they will not be
very strong partisans. Very few
men like kellar will succeed in getting
places, and those who do won't feel en-
tirely comfortable. Congressman like
Andrew jackson Warner will rise up and
demand their discharge; and though Mr..
Warner may not be successful in getting
Kellar dismissed, he will succeed in so
soaring the members of the Civil Service
Commission that they will not be in any
great haste to recommend another parti-
san for a place.
1t is noticeable that in proportion to the
number of employees in the different de-
partments at Washington the fewest re-
movals have been at the White House,
This seems to indicate that the President
is a better civil service reformer than any
of his Cabinet officers. 1t is probable,
however, that the demand fOrWhite House
places has not been so great as that fol-
the places in the Treasury and other de-
/ partments.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

Vice President Hendricks is reported
10 have been as amisble when out OF
water at Atlantic City as he was un-
graceful in the water. The guests Of the
hotel, botn Democrats and Republicans,
fell in love with him and bis accomplished
better half. Atlantic City appeared TO be
quite free Of offensive partisaus. There
are certain Republican officials, however,
who Wall not waste any affection on the
noble old Jacksonlan Demoorat
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

The locusts do not appear to have done
much damage to the crops in any part of
the country, but the little Hesslan flies
have played havoc with the wheat in some
sections of New York. 1t is stated that
the farmers in some parts of New York
have had their wheat crops completely
ruined, and VIII burn the stubble as it
stands in the field, in the nope of reduce
ing the numbers of the destructive in
seCts.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

TOR RENT, fine residence, rs Barnard
4 street, second from Liberty; hot and oold
water: and all modern improvements Apply
to d. b. LESTER.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

THE MORNING NEWS every day IN the
year by mail or carrier .t...... S1O W
THE MORNING NEWS every day for Six
months 10y mail or carrier OO
THR MORNING NEWS Mondays. Wed
nesdsys and Fridays. or Tuesdays,
Thursdays and Saturdays (oy
mail) ...........-....-- -.-.......---. . w
IHE WEEKLY NEWS one year ...-.... 20
THE MORNING NEWs is served in the city oy
newsdealers al 25 cents per week. Single
copies cents.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

TIC VnIO htpuDllCuns 90 not appear TO
feel at all treasured at the apparent con-
tirmation OF the report that GOV. Hoadly
will again be the Democratic standard
bearerin the State campaign. If their at
tempt TO array the Catholic vote against
Hoadly fails, they will have little room to
hope that they will be able to defeat him.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

making my Cabinet Photographs for 50
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

per dozen; best of work warranted. I have
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13

the public to know that am
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-13
auaufrn.

most beautiful fence for residences or Gene
tarv lots. Cuts and prices can be seen ~
JAUDON x BROOKS. $50 st. Julian stree
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1885-07-11
The Anamese Aristocrat.

The upper class of Anamese have
modelled their life and manners as
closely on those of the same class in
China rs their circumstances would
permit. They dress much the same,
but in silk of less glossy hue. They
never wear their hair en- queue. They
either wear sandals or 60 barefooted.
When they appear in public it is with a
certain number of huge umbrellas OF
parasols, some before or beside them to
indicate their rank. The number has
been considerably abridged since the
occupation of Tonquin by the Chinese
The vehicle in which they travel is q
horselike palanquin or hammock,
covered by an oval roof, bent down at
the sides. The dignitary always re-
clines, and is entirely screened from the
vulgar gaze by curtains that entirely
fill the uncovered openings. He is at
tended by multitude of coolies, who
carry, beside the parasols, his betel-nut
box, spittoon and any other articles
which may be wanted during the excur-
sion.-Cor. ST. Louis Globe-Democrat.