davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Hints for the Family.

A wife can generally hide any small
object from her husband by putting it
in his Bible.
When twin babies are so very much
alike that they cannot be readily dis
tinguished apart. the difficulty can be
overcome by Sitting the ears of one
with o pair OF scissors. Another plan
is to tattoo q lizard in the forehead Of
one baby and an elephant in the FORE
head of the other.
A wife may often be curo of a lack
of animation and general tedium ritP
with q few poker-chips and a photo
graph of q pretty actress carelessly
worn in the husbands vest pocket.
A husband, in sewing a button on his
trousers, will find that o small tack
hammer and a pair OF t~weezers, worked
in scientific cooperation with his teeth,
will serve as O practical substitute for
an ordinary thimble.
A good way to name a new baby is
to write q good many names on slips OF
paper, shake them up in a hat, and
take the top paper. If the name thus
obtained doesn't suit, keep shaking the
hat till you get a suitable one on top.
If the baby is a boy let the wife manage
the hat; but if it is q girl let the hus-
band manage it. This precaution
should be taken to prevent "stuting"
the hat n any unfair manipulation OF
the returns.
The best way to prevent the children
from playing with the cat is to swap the
cat off for o goat.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Importance Of TT fieS.

Many historical writer's have pointed
out what different results would have
followed some triiling departure from
whose lives they record. Livy devotes
pages to speculation as to what would
have ensued had Alexander the Great
invaded Italy. Had Prince Charles
Edward marched south instead of north
after quitting Derby, u H~anoverian
line of kings might have terminated
with George the Second. Had Charles
Mlrtel lost the battle of Tours in 1872,
the Crescent might have suppianted the
Cross in Europe for centuries. Had
the famous leon Basilike" been pub
Iished a week earlier, many persons
believed it would have saved the life of
Charles L., so strong n hold did it take
on the popular sentiment; but the
work appeared q few days after the
execution of the king.
In everyday life we must all know
countless instances in which a mere
triie has affected a whole career. The
failure to keep an appointment, or to
catch a train, a slight accident, a show
er, u Letter posted too late. may all be
the very turning points to a life, and
bear results for good or evil for the
whole of o mans existence. When the
Jacobites toasted the little gentleman
in black velvet" (the mole who made
the hillock at which William the
Thirds horse stumbled, inficting in
iuries on his rider, which afterward
proved fatall, they acknowledged the
universal tendency to trace up great
events to trifling sources.-Boston
Ru1npt
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30

and several subordinate courts. LII.
IBERIA was under the protection OF the
United States from its founding in
1922 until July rs, lS47. when it was
declared independent. In lSiS it was
recognized as O sovereign State by
Great Britain, and in 1861 by the Uni
ted States. There has been one popu-
lar outbreak, in 1871, caused by the
fact that the President. James Roye,
who had been to Great Britain to nego-
tiate q loan, was said to have appro-
priated part of the money obtained for
his own private uses. He was arrested
and imprisoned, and another President
installed in Office, The money hor-
rowed by Hoye in Great Britain laid
the foundation for a public debt for the
republic. it amounted to S50o,000.
and no interest has been paid on it
since 1874. the government being so
managed that it is always in financial
straits. The population OF Liberia is
estimated at l,0tS,00o inhabitants, OF
whom hut $4,000 are ~colonists from
America, the others being nat We blacks.
Since the emancipation OF the negroes
in this country, the immigration to
Liberia has been but slight, and the
republic is SO widely separated from
the enlightened nations OF the globe
that any rapid progress i'll civilization
and the arts a not DO expected from
it.-Inter ocean,
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Gen. Grant and the Rawlins Statue.

The committee in charge of the re-
moval of the statue of Gen. John A..
Rawlins, which nov stands at the tri-
angle at the western terminus of New
York avenue. have selected the area in
front of the War Department as the
spot upon which to place the statue.
The President and Secretary of War
both approve of this choice. 1t re-
quires the approval, however, OF Con
gress before the statue can be moved.
This no doubt will be obtained without
trouble. A writer in the Capital says
that Gen. Grant paid the funeral eX-
penses of Gen. Rawlins out of his own
pocket and bought the lot in the Con-
g~ressional Cemetery where the body
lies. as Gen. Rawlins left his family
entirely without means. Mrs. Raw
Inns remarked shortly after and moved
West, and is now in good circum-
stances. When it was discovered that
Gen. Grant had borne the funeral eX-
penses a fund was raised to reimburse
him, but he refused to accept it, and
the money went to pay for the monu-
ment which now stands over the grave.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
The MicrOnhOne.

The microphone-an electric stetho-
scope whose sensitiveness to the faint
est sounds has been described as max
ing "the walk of a fly seem like the
tramp of an ELEPHANTS likely to be-
come of great use in medical diagno-
sis. In the Atlanta Medical and Suryi-
cal Journal, DR.. Eve describes an inter
esting series of experiments made by
him with the instrument. He was able
to detect the nature of obscure frac-
lures by the character of the sounds
conducted through the instrument, and
could ~differentiate aneurismS from tu-
mors by the sounds of pulsation. In
tra-cranial and muscular sounds were
made out with great clearness, and il
diagnosing for stone the instrument
worked with mathematical accuracy
The doctor suggests that al audiphont
constructed on the principle of the
microphone would prove inestimablt
to people of impaired hearing.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
The Society Of the Cincinnati.

The historical association originated
in the Continental army during the
Revolut onary War. A few months be-
fore this army was disbanded General
Knox suggested that a society to per-
petuate the friendship of the officers
should be formed. His idea met with
favor, and the Society of the Cincin-
matt was organized at the cantonment
Of the troops near Newburg, New Jer-
sey. Washington was chosen the first
President and Henry Knox was the
first Secretary General. State societies
were formed auxiliary to the general
society. To insure the continued exist
ence OF the society. it was provided in
its constitution that the eldest mascu-
line descendant of an original member
should be entitled to wear the order
and enjoy the privileges OF tho society.
The order or badge OF the society con-
sists of a golden eagle, with enamelling.
suspended on q ribbon. On the breast
of the eagle is a mendallion, with o de-
vice representing Cincinnatus at his
pillow receiving the Roman Senator's
who came to offer him the chief magis-
tracy of Rome.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
The ReDub!ic OF Liheria.

The constitution of the Republic oi
Liberia is modelled on that of the Uni
ted States. The executive power is
vested in n President elected every
two years, and the Legislative in a body
known Us "the Legislature OF Liberia"
and divided into o Senate and House OF
Representatives. The Republic is di-
vided into four counties, each of which
elects two senator. for a term OF four
years. Representatives are elected BIZ
ennially, every county being entitled
to one representative, and an additional
one for every 10000 inhabitants.
There are now thirteen members of
this house of the Legislature. The
constitution provides that ali elections
shall be by ballot, and that every male
citizen possessing real estate shall lave
the right OF suffrage. None but colored
people are allowed the rights of citizen
ship-to hold office, or purchase real
estate in the republic. The President
must be 35 years of age. and be pos
sessed Of real estate to the value OF 500.
He ID assisted in his executive duties
by . Cabinet of seven members. By
the constitution slavery cannot exist
in the republic, or be countenanced
by any one of it's citizens. There is no
standing army, but service in the mill.
tia is required OF every citizen between
the ages Of l6 and 80. Tho judicial
power y vested N 4 supreme Court
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
WHY Jews Live so Long.

The Nsu England Medical Monthly com
ments very favorably on the proverbially
long and healthful lives OF the Jews. DR..
Pickard holds that this SUI periority Is due to
their stringent health laws. The Mosaic, Ike
the older Egg titan code, is very stringent re-
gardins the eating of flesh and Other articles
Of food. OF the animals examined, a large
proportion are always condemned as
unit for food. People who eat meat
indiscr!minately are very prone to disorders
of the blood and OF the kidneys, for meat is
composed of nitrogen, which the Kidneys
have to remove from the blood, and OF course
they cannot do this successfully except by
the aid Of Warmers safe cure, the best kid
ney strengthened, unless 1t Is temporarily
partaken of and only the very best meat is
used. Jews also use alcoholic liquors very
sparingly, and thus keep up good digestion,
and then again they are a holiday-loving and
Eabbath-obse rving class-HOusehctper.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Expeditions to the North Pole

There have been 1874 voyages and
land journeys undertaken between
1896 and 1857 by governments and ex-
plorers to the Arctic regions. OF
these, sixty-three went TO the north
west, twenty-nine via Behring's Strait,
and the rest to the northeast, or due
north. Since 1857 there have been the
notable expeditions of DR.. Hayes, OF
Capt. Hall, those Of Nordenskjold, sent
by the Swedish government, and 9th
ers sent by Germany, Russia, and Dem
mark the voyages made by James La
mont. OF the Royal Geographical Soci-
ETY., England, at his wi expense; the
expeditions Of Sir George Mares. Of
Leigh Smith, and that OF the Inflated
Jeanette the search expeditions OF the
Tigress, the Juniata, and those sent to
rescue Lieut.. Greedy; further. all the
expeditions fitted out under tho aus
pieces OF the polar expedition--in which
the Greedy expedition was included
and o number OF minor voyages, max.
ing D sam total Of some sixty exploring
journeys in these twenty-seven years.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30

A birmingham lecturer upon Nina
and Muscle is greatly exercised over
the want OF training the facial express
sion observable in people of polite So
ciety. He has been at a Scotch funeral
and was shocked at the awkwardness
of the members of the most exclusive
circles of Edinburgh, OF whom some
200 were present. "Most curious was
it," he declares, Ito notice the facial
contortions practicel to express a
sense of love and sympathy. Gross
exaggeration was the commonest fault;
and sometimes attempts to avoid this
ended in an aspect Of callous indiffer-
ence or positive enjoyment
The lecturer, while deploring this
untoward condition Of things does not
seem fully to have conquered the prob
lem of providing a remedy. He in.
deed recommended the teaching of
dancing early in life, believing that
this art, properly cultivated, may dis
cipline large groups OF centers into
harmonious action, enlarge the domin-
ion of the will, abolish unseemly mus
cular tricks and antics, develop the
sense Of equilibrium, and impart grace
and self-confidence." Ali this is very
we'll, bat it does not 90 far enough.
Modern civilization can be satisfied
with nothing short of perfection, and
while the disciplining OF large groups
of centers into harmonious action will
undoubtedly do much to mitigate the
present appalling aw~kwardness of
modern society people, it is hardly to
be expected that it will add that deli
cate grace Of expression which is so
greatly to be desired.
As q matter of fact the time has evil
IDENTIFY come when it is imperatively
necessary that a professor OF facial ex-
preston be added to every fashionable
school. Delsarte must become the
high priest of polite circles, and peo-
pie must be trained to assume upon
the stage of daily lie those tictions of
countenance which have hitherto been
too exclusively relegated, to the mimic
world behide the f~ootlights. Surely
it is absurd to devote so much time to
the cultivation of all other faculties
while facial expression, most promi-
nent OF all, is neglected. by all means
let our young people be trained so that
at least they shall he able to assume,
upon SO important IN occasion as a
public funeral, an expression which
| shall convey "a sense of love and SYM
patty" Civilization is an artificial
| state and it must be treated accord
ingly: let us be consistent at whatever
cost-- HDStnU Carrier.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Striking the Wrong Man.

Two Berlin hack drivers, each with
a passenger in his vehicle, ran into
each other in o narrow street. They
began to abuse each other, and grow
ing more violent, n OF them raised
his whip and struck, not his opponent,
but his opponents passenger.
$50" exclaimed the other foaming
with rage, "yoa thrash my passenger.
do you? Now I'll thrash your fare"
and those hackmen dashed the nnfor-
tunate passengers, but did not waste a
blow on each other.
This is very similar to the policy
pursued by the imperial governments
OF Russia and Germany. They do not
60 to war with each other, but they
take il out on the unfortunate Jews
The Russians expel the German Jews
from the German provinces of Russia,
and the Germans expei tho Russian
Jews from Poland and other portions
Of the German empire. -Boston Glotk
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Why n Wise Darkey Married.

Sam Johnslng was accosted as fol-
lows:
81 hears you has done got married at
last?"
Eyes, I married de Wildly Snow
ball."
."How de debble did yer come tel
marry dat old woman?"
OH splain hit ter yer. You knows
how spensive hit am ter raise a family
OBJ young niggahs in Austin. Dey neb-
Der turns out we'll. Dey am a constant
cause OLD anxiety"
well, what OBJ dat?"
"You see by marryin' de WILDLY
Snowfall, l sabes myself de trouble
and misery oh raisin' a family, bekast
her younges o am more den 40 yeahs
OBJ age. BY his heah marriage / gets {
family oh growed up childruns widou'
habing to pay a cent.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
She Had Been There Before.

They had been home from their
honeymoon about six weeks when he
came home an hour earlier than usual
and softly said: "My darling seems to
be worried about something. 1 pre-
sumo it is the cares and anxieties of
owning such a house as this. What a
relief it would be if you decided it over
to me! Them
"Stop right there" she commanded.
~ was a widow when you married me,
and all my property is in my hand and
always will be. Ideeded one house to
a husband, and also signed two chattel
mortgages, but no other husband will
ever work roots on mel Your darling
is all O. K, and don't you forget it,
He failed to put up more margin
and the broker closed him out on that
deal.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Social Customs Among Irish Gentry.

The distances are SO great in Ireland
between country houses that social en-
tertainmenis have to be planned with
direct view to this fact. Morning par.
ties" are given ell summer and until
late in the autumn. Invitations for
these are issued perhaps two weeks in
advance. and we have known them to
extend over thirty miles OF country.
Guests are invited for 1890 or IL, and
arrive between these hours and md.
day. The grounds are in order with
tennis, croquet, marques, ETC., just as
for any garden party, rugs laid down,
and easy lawn chairs disposed about,
and the company amuse themselves
variously until l or 2 o'clock, when o
sumptnous luncheon is served; again
the company stroll outdoors, spending
the afternoon socially and with the 5
o'clock tea on the lawn, the twilight in
doors or out, and finally at 8 o'clock q
supper closes the days festivities, after
which come the sounds of the many
carriages from the stables, where John,
and james, and Stephen, and Peter
have been most Hospitality entertained,
and the company roll away, many hav-
ing q drive Of fifteen or twenty miles
before them.
Dinners seem to belong to winter
time in Ireland, also dances" and
once hunting commences there are fine
times for one end all. The magis-
trates' dinners bring together pleasant
parties for both ladies' and gentlemen
st the house'of the magistrate who is
nearest the court. and these are both
social and instructive, since the talk is
Of the day. Opinions are freely vented,
and rs church differences are no longer
so cruelty marked, each man may ode.
clare his own" without fear OF belng
hunted down.
One thing to be noted with pleasure
and profit in an Irish house is the rela.
ton between master and man, mistress
and maid. Nowhere have We seer bet
ter-bred, better-trained servants than
in such . country house as we have de.
scribed. There is no undue familiarity.
no possible disrespect, and yet q ge-
niality prevails among the servants, q
quiet sort of humor, q readiness to
laugh and say a bright word now and
again. which shows how entirely they
consider the place their home. The de-
votion OF an old Irish family servant
10 proverbia1, aud after seeing them in
their own country one cannot wonder
at il. -Hafper's Bdzdr.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
The National COmplaint.

Dyspepsia is the national complaint. Almost
every other mar or woman you meet has it, and
the result is that the number of pseudo-remediee
for it is as numerous as Pharaoh's host. They
are for the most part worthless. There is, how.
ever, q searching eradicant of this distressing
and obdurate malady, one whose genuine merits
long since raised 1t to a foremost place among
the staple medicines of America. Hostetter's
Stomach Bitters extirrates dyspepsia with
greater certainty and prcmptitude than any
known remedy, and is a most genial invigorant,
appetizer and aid to secretion. These are not
empty assertions, as thousands OF our country
men and women who hare experienced its
effects are aware, but are backed up by irrefra.
gable proofs repeatedly laid before the public
The Bitters also promote n regular habit of body
and give q healthful stimulus TO the urinary
organs.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
An Excusable Error.

s.Well." said Mr.. Snaggs, looking up
from his paper. "a seat in the New
York Stock Exchange has just been
sold for S34 0
Mercy, commented Mrs. snaggs.
"Who is going to singg" ,
Singh howled Snaggs. "What
would they sing for at a stock ex-
change? Have you got an idea it is a
kind of q concerto .
"Well, don't get cross, dear.
thought some great foreign singer was
going to be there, or seats wouldn't be
so dear. - Boston Post.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
A Poor. Weak Sister.

who is suffering from ailments peculiar 10
her sex, dreadiug to go to Il physician, but
knowing she needs medical help, will find, in
DIR. Pierce's 'Favorite Prescription a prep
ar.tion which will give her strength and new
life through the restoration of all her organs
to their natural and healthy action. 1t Is the
result of many years OF study and practice by
a thoroughly scientific physician who has
made these troubles q speciality. To be had
of all druggists.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30

"Augustus,n said an uptown young
lady to a silly swell of the genus dude
who wouldn't take hint unless a house
fell on him, II read something in q pa
per to-day which reminded me of you.n
Jaw, weally, you, aw flattah me, bah
Jovei Aw, what was it, aw?"
ut was an article on the thinking
powers Of q calf Ha! ha! hal"
But Augustus didn't wen smile. He
merely took his hat and cane and feebly
crawled out Of the door.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30

Il an handling your Athlophoros. 1t
is quite new here and is giving good sat
isfaction whenever tried Edward Dosh,
at Guthrie Center, Iowa, druggist, states
regarding his experience with this sovcr,
eign remedy for rheumatism and neural
DIN
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
TYnIcal Texns landlord.

On the 1st of the month Jim hurry.
an Austin landlord. called on Hostel.
ter McGinnis for rent.
MI. hurry, / don't think you ought
to charge me $50 o month for the rent
Of this room. When it rains the water
runs right into the room through the
roof-it leaks so."
sWhat? There is water running ON
the premises? You will have to pay
s5 extra for that. How long have you
been enjoying the water privilege at
my expense ?"-1eras Sittings.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Wrecks OF Humanity.

who have wasted their manly vigor and pow
ers by youthful! tollios. inducing nervous de-
bility, impaired memory, mental anxiety. de-
spondency, lack of self confidence and " III
power, weak back and kindred weaknesses,
should address, with 10 cents in stamrs, for
large illustrated treatise giving unfaiing
means of cure, Worlds Dispcnstry Medical
Association. 1858 Main Street, Buffalo. n. Y.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30

In Thibet the women do all the hard
work, leaving the men to do the visit
ing and the gossiping. 1t is thought
this may help to explain why SO many
Americans who go abroad get dissatis-
fed with their W country.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Only twenty five cents.
Red Star Cough Cure.
No opiates or poisons.
Changed His Mind.

"Rebecca, you shall not speak mid
does Moses Levi vonce more"
"Oh, ladder, you break mine heardt.
We vas almost engaged. Wy shall /
not speak of him?"
"He .haf sheated me. He hat sold
me a paste diamond for a shenuine
'shtone."
"Oh, ladder, dot shouldt recommend
him to you as a son-in-law. Ii he can
fool a wise man like you, see vat a for
tune he hat in der chewelry pisiness."
"Rebecca, you vas schmarder as !
thought. Get married ven you like. |
am ankchious to 60 in partnership Wit
mine son-in-law. National Weekly.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30
Business IL Business.

Bereaved Widow ito undertaker)-
sHave you mot made = slight mistake
10 your bill. Mr.. Monld?"
MI. Mould-@I think not, madam"
Bereaved Widow-"I see you have
charged for fifteen carriages. I am
quite sure there were only fourteen. I
counted them on leaving the ohusch,
eDd also ct the grave, ard.'-Ncm York
Times.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-12-30

ONE Of tue Boston papers has
shocked, II not horriied, its readers by
statia& that "~low-necked dresses will
DO dropped at the opera this season
A great many old ladies feared last
winter 1t would come to this.