The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-02-22
VOLCANO STUDY.
Bill Nye on the Peculiarities
Of Vesuvius.
IT'S HABITS AND TEMPERAMENT.
The Humorist Sees in the Occasional
Eruptions a Strange
Phenomenon.

The study of the habits and tempera-
ment of the volcano, at distance of
about 10000 miles, is one that
las always afforded me much pleasure
In watching and noting the peculiar
phenomena of the eruptions 1 have
almost lost sight of its attendant
dangers.
A volcano is always feveriSh and rest
less till after the eruption, then it feels
better. The first symptoms of an
eruption are cold feet, bad dreams, bad
breath, and dark circles around the
crater. This will be followed by an
uncomfortable feeling in the bowels of
the earth, and fiuttering pulse. The
volcano is then about to erupt, and
those who live near there had better sell
out at sacrifice.
One thousand eight hundred and
eighty-four years ago. the Roman geo
grapher and weather crank, Strabo,
spoke of Vesuvius as a burnt mountain,
but it had not at that time turned itself
wrong side out. Quite a forest grew
where ITS crater now stands. For fifty
years, Vesuvius had bilious spells, but
kept on drawing its salary without loss
of time, but in 70 A. D., it turned itself
loose and tore up the ground a good
deal. Real estate was up to an aston
ishlng height, but became depressed
again at once. The south half of the
mountain was jerked loose, as Pliny has
it, and Knocked galley west. This was
followed by a shower of hot, wet ashes,
which completely obliterated PompeiI
and Herculaneum. These towns have
been exhumed, lately, but owing to the
criminal delay of the authorities in
doing so, no lives were saved.
These cities are not covered with lava.
Scientists say that the ruins were found
under deep layer of volcanic tufa 1
do not know what tufa is, but presume
the term is perfectly proper and safe to
use in good society. / have heard of
the tufa cigars, which are sold atthe rate
of tufa cents, but am Comparatively
gnorant of the general appearance of
volcanic tufa. This is a joke that /
thought of myself. Times are so close,
this winter, that l am obliged to origi-
nate good many OF my own jokes, and
to write my autographs. My amanu-
enSis, who has stood by me so long
and aided me so well has been discharg-
ed. Autograph hunters will notice that
my autographs are not so good as when
i had an amanuenSiS-
For nearly thousand years Vesuvius
then remained in a comatose state, with
only an occasional eruption. Then for
800 years it did not erupt. In 1888, on
the shore of the Gulf of Bate, in the
Bay OF Naples, new and attractive
crater was opened. 1t was a good,
easy-running crater, and the lava was
hot when it came out. Hot lava is not
good for food. It hardens in the stom-
ach and taints the breath with the
odor of sulphur
In 1881 Vesuvius itself became in
lensely irritable and showed signs of a
morbid desire to erupt During the
100 years of quiet the crater had been
covered over with the wild boar of Italy
and the tame bore of England The
slopes of the mountain were cultivated
up to the foot of the cone and picnics
swarmed over the greensward at its
base.
Suddenly, in the latter part of De
cember, Vesuvius rose on its hind feet
and painted Rome red All Southern
EUROPE ana a part OF New 1Ork state
was covered with ashes and debris from
the eternal economy of the volcano.
Many people were killed who had never
previously lost their lives The way
Yesuvius slung hot mud at the Neapoli-
tan hordes, that fall, was solemn
warning to the puny pugmire pushes
of putrid politics in the land of the free
and the home of the brave The beauti-
full cities of Resini and PORTED were en-
tirely destroyed and those Of Tore del
| Greco and Tore dell Annunziata would
have persisted if they had not spread
the names of the towns over themselves
and escaped. a good long name in
Italy is rather to be chosen than great
] riches.
About every ten years since the above
/ date, VesuyiuS has been liable to Jar the
country and shake down few towns.
covering the people with stuff that is
entirely useless. The eruption of Vesu-
vius is fine sight at night No doubt
but there will always be more or less APP
prehension on the part of spectators
until some American "rustler" puts a
damper on the crater of Vesuvius so
that he can regulate the eruption. At
present these spasmS are too irregular
and too vehement.