Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1885-06-11
From the petrol. Free Preaa.1

From the Detroit Free Preml
81 should like to spoke q few remarks
70 Brudder Side Bar Skinner, /" observed
The President, as the dust began to
settle In Paradise Hall.
Brother Skinner, who il q young man
Of %, with mild eye and lilac necktie.
advanced TO the front and the President
continued:
Brudder Skinner, de news has
reached my ears that you am about to
be mar'd. ! trus' dat de report am
true, bekase believe it am the dooty Of
cherry young man who kin support q
wife to take one"
ut am true, sab.
'sDen let me compliment you Wild one
hand an spoke afew remarks to you wild
deodder. Gettin' mar'd hes its very seri-
Gus side. For instance, am de gal gwine
to mary you bekase she loves you, or
to.spite her folkes bekase dey kept her
away from de skatin' rink9 Am you
gwine to mary de gal for love, or bekase
her father has some wealth which You
hope he'll shell out for your benefit?
Love am powerful emoahun, Brud-
der Skinner, but love widout pork and
Eaters to keep 1t goin' am like de froth
On top Of saltwater.
Don't mistake your sentiments. tt
you am sartin dat you love, go ahead.
II It am only lollypop, hire out as q
deck hand on o steamboat for q week
an it win all 60 away. I hev know
couples ez seemed to be dyin' Of love.
DER silly ackshuns made EN- de lafin'-
stock Of q hull nayburhood. Dey
seemed TO dote and dote, but it didn't
alask AFTER couple OF Vars de husband
war home grumbler an tyrant, an de
wife gadabout an scold. What dey
s'posed was love war only lollypop.
'sDoan' marry q gal hopin' dat her
father will set you up In de barber biz
ness. Most fadder-in-laws not only want
oil dey hez got, but am willin' to struggle
FUR another $40, 900.
ssDoan' 'sot down an figger dat TO-
taters, loaf Of bread, half pound Of
meat an quart Of applesass am goin'
70 run you fur week. You win want
oil dc salary you kin ai'rn, an you
had better look aroun' an And SOMEBODY
who win lend you dollar now an then.
tDoan' fatter yerselves dat ali You
hev got to do am TO hug in de house an
kiss ober de gate. You'll be hungry fur
con beef and baked beans; your cloze
viii war ont; your Aour an butter win
waste away, an bill fur two months
rent viii send chill up yer back. De
man or woman who specks that mar'd
lie am green an shady lane, lined wild
orange blossoms on one side an ten
dollar bills on de odder. ann gwine to
wake up some day an End de rats leavin'
de place in disgust.
ssThink OF desc things, Brudder Skin
ner. You kin git wife in about Ave
minutes, but it takes Ave Vars to git
shet OF some Of 'em. Expeck about one
days sunshine fur week Of
cloudy weather. Reckon on house
rent comm due de fust OBJ cherry
month, an de grocer an butcher keepin'
an eye out fur you each Saturday night
Il viii amaze you how de woodpile de-
cedes an how de- flour gifts outen de
bari SO soon. Doan' walk into matri-
mony like D lobster into box, but
fgger on whether de bait am with de
risks. # you conclude to mary you
lin depend on dis club attendin' de OBJ.
sequies, bringin' along bounteous sup
ply Of ham sandwiches. II you decide
not to, it am probable dat you win so0n
be- promoted to some position Of trust
en- responsibility.