davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24
Mercury's Mystery.


Mercury defies the host of terrestrial
astronomers and mathematicians and
spins on his way, his perihelion point
advancing with accelerating speed, in
a fashion incompreheDsible to those
best yersed in the laws that hold in
place the sun and his family of worlds
The rebellious planet refuses to come
under the rules, and the facs that the
perihelon Of his orbit moves round the
sun faster than it ought to is now con-
sidered as established. The cause of
the anomaly has not yet been detected.
No predetermined Vulcan, no unnamed
planets, no group of asteroids have
ever made transits over the sun and re-
stored harmony to the system. Un-
skilled observers in most instances have
seen little bodies crossing the sun that
had the appearance Of planets. Their
observations, however, have not been
confirmed by observers who for fifty
years have never allowed a fair day to
pass without scanning OF mapping the
SUMS face. The transit of a planet no
bigger than pins point would not es-
cape their yigilant watch. During to-
tai ecl:pses tiny stars have been noted
that it was hoped would prove to be
the much desired tra-Mercurial plan
cts. But the preponderance of evidence
is against the existence of the unseen
wanderers, and the problem remains as
completely unsolved as it did when the
discrepancy was first discovered. -
P,,o9.;Go91cp .To9ty.1,1I
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

"WHAT we learn with pleasure wenever
forget. ALFRED Mercier. The following is
dollars without receiving any benefit, :"
says Mrs. Emily Rhoads, of McBrides,
Mich. :" had female complaints, especial
ly dragging down. for over six years.
DR.. R. V. Pierce's sFavorite Prescription
did me more good than any medicine ever
took. advise every sick lady to take it,"
And so do we. 1t never disappoints it's
patrons. Druggists sell it.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

THE Health Commissioner, Baltimore,
Md, DR.. James A. Steuart, says of Red
Star Cough Cure: 1t combines in an unique
and effective manner approved curative
agencies which are relied upon by the
faculties of the different schools of medi-
cine, with other valuable ingredients. Con.
tains no poisons or opiates.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24
STRANGER than Tiction

are the records of some of the cures Of con-
sumption effected by that most wonderful
remedy-Dr. Pierce's ''Golden Medical Dis
coyery." Thousands of grateful men and
women, who have been snatched almost
thab 9 un IN is ea9 stages fag seI
longer incurable. The Discovery has no
equal as pecteral and Alternative, aad the
most obstinate affections of the throat and
lungs yield to its power. All druggists.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

--'.You say" said a bystander,
"that you saw this transaction" Eyes,
I saw it myself ''You would hardly
believe it if you hadn't seen it, would
you?' mo, I should not" ''Humph!
I didn't see itr' The individual seemed
to think there was a double meaning
s'in the remark of the gentleman who
spoke last. -
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

Mr.. PETER MAILEN, 212 W. Twenty
fourth street, New York, says that he suf-
fered six years with rheumatism and found
40 relief until st. Jacobs Oil, the sovereign
remedy, was applied, which cured him
completely.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

CoUGHs AND HoARsENEss.-Th irrita-
ton which induces coughing Immediately
relieSed by use of g Br01gn'S Bronchial
IT0cheS." Sold only in boxes. % cts.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24
Pile Tumors,

however large, speedily and painlessly
cured without knife, caustic or salVe. Send
six cents in stamps for pamphlet, refer
Medical ASHTON, 663 Main ST., Buffalo, n. Z.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

Dog Buyers Guide; 100 pages, engraving:
OF all breeds, colored plates, price of dogs
and where to buy them, mailed fer 16c. As
ISOLATED Fanciers, 237 S. sth St, Phila., Pa
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

AT a trial of the Haskell multi
charge gun at Sandy Hook, a shot
weighing 1872 pounds was sent nearly
four miles at the rate of eighteen hun
bred feet per second. N Y San.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24
Yonnr Men, Read This.

The VoLTAIo BELT Co., of Marshall, Mich.,
offer to send their celebrated ELECTRo-VoLr
TAIC BELT and other ELECTRIC APPLIANCES
on trial for 30 days, to men (young or old)
ity and all kindred troubles. Also forrheu-
matism, neuralgia ,paraly land many 9th
or diseases. Complete restoration to health,
vigor, and manhood guaranteed. No risk in
Cured, as 80 days. trial is allowed. Write
them atonce for illustrated pamphlet, free.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

"A person in Cumming, Ga, found
a pin in the center of a roasted potato,
the other day, which had evidently been
there from the formation of the tuber,
as it was quite rusty.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

A PATIENT said OF his doctor: ssHe gave
me so much medicine that was sick q
long time after got well.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

Ell III sst6sd man who wants good and steady
eplpli,IGettt Al home should address with stamp 70
L. &. BAR AkG.E, East SaSsetDoFo' A AAA 6
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

THE sewing machine is the most im-
portant member in women's sew-siety,-
IFSitehGlE Times.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

In a great will case on trial in New York
last summer 1863 exceptions were taken.
But this was an exceptional case.-N. /.
Graphic.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

WHEN a passenger boards q steamboat
what is the bill of fare?-N. I. Ledger.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24
no Won Want to Buy q Dog?

Opp as it seems, when a dealer weigh!
a fish he always counts in the scales.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

1F afflicted with Sore Eyes, use DIR. Isaac
Thompson's Eye Water. Druggists sell it 25c,
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

A PHYSICIAN recently advised his patient
to g live in the sum- The invalid wonders
how he is to get there.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

q 9E amonth SALARY or commission to agents for
- % the grand New Book. The FoTtd'S K0adeys
Write for particulars. Historical Pub Co., ST. Louis NO.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

Is DoN'T cry over split milk, y or you'll be
fined for adulterating the article.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

n q E7NF7R Treated and cured without the knife
kHMR-ER Book on treatment sent free. Address
Vk3&sU4kb F. L.POND, D., Aurora, Kane Co-lt
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

PIXIES TooTHACHE DROPS cure1n minute, 25c.
CLIENTS Sulphur Soap heals and beant1hes. 2oc'
GERMAN CORN REMOVER kills Corns s. Bunions.
St. Landry democrat., 1885-01-24

A PRETTY young lady's face is like a
town clock because yeu g. enen5aliy glance
at it while passing.-CsI City De1TzsGs
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
Whisky and Hard Times.
From tho New York Sun.

Talking to the head of one of the
largest firms of liquor dealers of the
country the writer was comforted by
the following statement:
'We deal in everything, from the
cheapest beer to the most expensive
kind of red wines, sherry, cordials and
champagnes. The general vine trade
IS not worth speaking of, so poor it is.
The champagne trade shows q decrease
OF 30 per cent. as compared with two
years ago. Even the beer taade is de-
creasing. The masses have not enough
money for the Scent schooners con-
sumed at the bar. Those who can not
1--we without beer buy it by the Jug for
their meals, and no more. The only arti-
Gle that shows All increase of consump.
ton Is whisky. The low as well as the
high grades of it are in sharp demand,
although there has already been good
advance in prices. To my mind this il
the best proof that people who formerly
drank wine drink whisky now, and that
working-men who in times of prosperity
drink beer with their families tipple now
bad whisky all by themselves. Thus, as
far as the liquor trade is concerned.
there is not the slightest indication of
Improvement, and this trade is q pretty
good barometer of the general condition
of the country. Hotels, bar-rooms and
restaurants are ell running down, and
the cellars of the rich are fast being de-
pleted. Nobody seems to be disposed to
buy anything. and those who used to
buy by the cask buy now by the gallon.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
How Did You Earn Your First
Dollar2

From the New York World
Do you know about that fortuitous
aggregation of oratorical atoms called
"The Twilight club?" It is a good
place to drop in once = fortnight and
hear . tsrse expression of tho latest
thought. I was there one Thursday
evening not long ago, and the question
was, "How did you earn your first dol
lar?" Around tho table it went, elicit
ing = confession at every plate more OF
less interesting or amusing, till it struck
Capt. John Goldman, late shipmaster.
"Well," he said, Il earned my first mon.
ey when was = boy. I hired out a
hostage" "Whst sort Of business il
that?" inquired the chairman. II was
. young chap and I took the risk" he
explsined. "Our captain stopped at
Sumatrs for cargo, and engaged it to
bs ready on his return ut certain time.
But, on the one hand, he didn't want
to pay for it till he got it; and, on the
other hand, the rajah didn't want to
have it ready till he knew it would
be taken. In this dilemma the cap
tain offered $40 if one of tho crew would
stay three months ~ 4 hostage among
the savsges-to bs sacrifced' only in
the event of his not returning for his
cargo. I was young and reckless, and
dumped ct the chance. Tho captain
came back all right, but I confess to
feeling little uneasy sometimes"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
He Didn't "Beller."

Old lady (who has met with an aoci-
dent, but is coming out all right. y
Josh, ye didn't boiler none when 70
thought was dyin.' I don't b'lieve ye
"Thet amt no sign 5 know on" says
Josh, Il was too busy over ye ter beller.
I hadn't no time"
"Wa'al 70 mought bellered little
fur looks sake. weren't 50 fur gone
but what I'd known't."
II mought boiler . little now Of
twould do any good" This with =
twinkle in his eye. The old lady SEEM
ed to think there was more to this than
appeared at first, and. after studying
the matter little time, said:
Pears to mo 'twould look . loetlo %
though you was sorry ! como outvpt."
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
On tho Bridge.

Gen. Sherman admires tho Brooklyn
bridge. He spoke of it CLOWN ely al
the dinner Of tho N. E. Society in
Brooklyn.
"When I crossed that beautiful
bridge this evening, felt As though
were in some holy temple, for nothing
more majestic has tho hands Of man
wrought. Whether it pays two psr cent.
or three per cont. or five per cont. in.
forest is to mo . mere nothing. Tho
mere thought, tho nero conception OF
the thought, is something 80 pure and 80
magnificent that I would Danish all
ideas of profit.
Each time I sit with my friend Gen.
Hancock on Governors Island, and
look across at tho beautiful stream call
ed the East River (not river 1t all, but
an arm of the sea- and behold tho lines
Of proportion, strength and durability
of tho Brooklyn Bridge. I admire it moro
than the most beautiful pictures I have
ever seen in tho galleries of France,
Florence, or London"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
The Fortunes of 'cTrealrs."
From the Philadelphia times.

From the Philadelphia times.
Speaking of the savings of freaks Of
nature, = prominent circus and muse
um manager said recently: "They are
nearly al economical, and nine out of
every ton are filled with 4 desire to
own = farm. Tom Thumb spent \
great deal of money, and yet loft = snug
fortune. Mile Cristinv, the double-
headed girl, has made $50, 900 or $751;
900, but she lost the greater part of it
backing the circus of friend q few
years ago. I suppose she is still worth
e20. 900. Hannah Battcrsby and her
skeleton husband, who live in this city,
are worth 10000. John Powers, tho
fat man, accumulated $40, 1000. Capt.
Bates and his wife, big people are
worth $4,000. They have fine fam
In the west. If Lucia Zarets, the Mex
lean midget, had received all the salary
she earned for her manager, she would
be worth $25 GOO. As it is the man
ager, Frank Uhner, has tho money,
minus a, 900 or S 900 hs has paid to
Lucia's father. Eli Bowen, tho legless
man, has $4,000 in bank. Cooper, tho
giant, has nearly ~ much. The dime
museums have raised tho salaries Of
freaks 80 much that thsy will all have
farms it the managers pooket-books
hold out"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

4is father u dead, and hisaeth.r, your onl,
daughter. Is supporting herself b giving mu:
forgive and forget the past Take your deal
ones Into your heart aud homA"
Mr.. Durant looked at The fair young pleade,
curlously; suspicious moisture dimmod for
IN instant the brightness of bis dark eyes,
Then he said slowly, sDo you know what
your intsrcession will cost yorl-that il, il /
aocede to your request, Agnes, think Veil Of
what you are doing. Ny viii Is made and it 10
in your favor"
"Burn it! It il UNJUST Hers ID your right
ful heir!" and Agnes pointed to the blooming
ehildieh face with an earnest besseching gess-
Ore.
''You are good little thing, Agnes, lam
not deceived in you read Il In your faoc
whom hr:t saw you. Be il - you say. I
have enough forau"
Thus Agnes made peace between the father
and daughter, and when the sweet kift Of =
young soul clad in mortal guise came to her
own arlnS few months later, he was received
with Joy which WAS not dimmed BY the feel
ing that nor own little son WAS an interlopor-
taking the Inheritance from tho rightful heir:
and the bleeaing which is promised to all
''peacemakers' descended upon tho happy
home, making it like foretasts of heaven q
live within its boundaries Fer all Wa har-
mony and love-
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
i Fswnsd Bride

A shilling used to b the fee, in New
York, for administering in oath and
signing An affidavit. In tho days whom
the ecosntris '.Dicky" Riker was re-
oorder Of the city; there were many
bad shillings ID circulation, and
"Dicky," to guard. himself from, being
cheated out of his fec, used to swear an
applicant for his signature in this
style:
You swear that tho affidavit to which
you have subscribed your name is true,
to tho best Of your knowledge aud BE-
lief, and that this is . good shilling, 20
help you God!"
A young justice of the peace, living
In Georgia, recently displayed Is much
caution Is the ancient recorder of New
York, for no held bride % security for
the payment Of the marriage-fse. The
story, a. told by the Atlanta Constitu-
ton. il amusing:
One Of the most novel marriages In
tho history Of Norwood took place last
week. The applicants were lady and
gentleman of the ebony hue.
The young justice of the peace, who
10 very conversant with tho law, but .
little inexperienced in performing mar
riage ceremonies, proceeded to unite the
h: Fl: pair pair Dor. mark. o, .,o;t.m.nt
and, in nervous tone, he bade tho two
join hands.
This they did, joining, however, their
loft hands, and were made one. The
Joyous couple then proceeded to depart,
whereupon tho following conversation
ensued:
J. P:-Where's my fec; You didn't
expect mo to marry you for nothing, did
your
Groom (sxcit.dly)-wy, boss, /
amt got . cent! How much do YOU
charge? I didn't know I had to pay for
margin.
J. $3.50: I'll just keep your wifi.
here until You 60 and get the amount.
AT tho same time bidding tho blushinx
bride to take her seat).
CROMWELL. I'll try to git it.
OF he went to procure An order from
bis employer, but. staying rather long,
tho bride moved restlsssly toward tho
door.
"Taks yoar seat, WAS heard in solemn
tones from tho justice of the peace.
She complied. but what her feelings
must have been can't be easily described.
However, the groom returned in due
time, settled the bill, and took his
'pawned" bride homo, a wiser if not.
better man.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

on the seacshors, by CAswE1L., HAZARD h CO.,
New York. 1t 10 absolutely pure and sweet.
Patients whs have oacs taken Il prefer it to Ill
othere- Physicians have decided It superior to
any Of the ether oils in market.
CaAFrsD HANDS, FACE PIAPLEs, and rough
1k1n cured BY usiAg JUNIPER Tar soar, made 81
CAsWDl.L, HAZARD 4 CO.. New York
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
"shoot Polly 40 m. x,i.s.,

Wa the way it appeared in tho proof slip The
argus eyed proof reader, however. knew the
quotation intended and changed il to rsad:
.'6hsot Folly ~ she dies. Pope. OF course
1t was IN errsr, yet how many are daily COM
hitting much gr.ver errors BY allowing the
arst symptoms Of consumption to 60 UNDECIDED
tons, or hacking cough, It is suicidal to delay
. single moment the use Of Dr. Pierce's "Gold-
On Medical Discovery,"-the great and only re-
liable remedy yet Known for this terribly fatal
malsdy. Send TIVE letter stamps for DR..
Plerce's complete treatise on this disease Ad-
dress Worlds Dispsnsary Medical Association,
Buffalo. n. Y.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
Y1Iuro0 Wo1't I,aa.

The agn1ss showing the enormous yearly
medicine beyond dispute. 1t il purely vse-
etsbls compound Sf Ssrtain roots, leavIs ind
berries known to hays special value in kidney
troubleA Combined With these are remedies
acting directly On the Liver and Bowels It 10
because Of this combined action that Kidney
Mert ~ proved such an unsqualled remedy
IN alldisssses Of these organA
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
4 Good DroAkfast,

Mra = W: Carpenter, Overlee, Baltimore
county, Maryland, writes: was greatly bone
dted BY the use Of Red Star Cough Cure, when
suffering from severe cold. Ny cook was o.
riously i'll from deep. seated cough. She had
consulted hsr doctor without relief. By my i'd
vice she used the Cough euro in connection
with IN external application Of st. Jacobs Oil
to her side. In one night tho change wrought
was most gratifying and astonishing. In The
morning she was like new person
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
s'I.au1h and GROW YiA -

ASu80 S0o VxoW xotj
10 prsospt easily preached, but not 10 easy to
practice. Ha person has no appetite, but 4
distressing nausea, sick headache, dyspepsis,
boils, or any other i'll resulting from inaction
Of the bowles, it 10 impossible to got up such Z
laugh 40 will produce aldermanic corpulsnce.
In order to laugh satisfactorily you must bs
bowels in good order. You can do this and
laugh heartily With Dr.. Piercs's pleasant Pur-
gativs Pellets, the little regulators of the liver
and bowels and best promoters Of jollity-
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

It 10 not understood Why druggists keep in
stock 10 many kinds Of medicines for coughs,
colds and consumption, when it il only neces-
sary to keep Aliens Lung Balsam, that old, r.
ara6sn, and perfectly harmless, - it contains
no opium In any form. Sold everywhere
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09
wisely 14sp,;a - D.arv~.n.

The adoption by most Of the prominent dairy
men and farmers Of the United states; Of the
Improved Butter Color made BY Welle Rich
ardses 4 Co, Burlington, Vt, 10 proof of
sssir wisdom in business point Of view.
Nearly I'LL winter butter 10 colorod in order to
make IL marketable, aud thin color 10 the best:
IN reesrd 70 purity, strength, psrmsnsnos, and
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

"a New SURF Faded articles Of ali kinds
restored to their original beauty BY Diamond
Dyes. Perfect and simple lOc. At all drug
gists. Wells, Richardson Co. Burlington, Vt
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

o. my back! That lame back 10 caused BY
kidney disease Stop it at once by Hunt'a
kidney and Lverl Remedy
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

1HAvr taken one bottle Of DR. GRAvEs' HIARr
REouIAToR for heart Disease and nnd it all I
could DESIRE "A A. Holbrook, Worcester, Mass.
Free pamphlet Of +. E. Ingalls,, Cambridge,
Mass.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

THOSE COMPLAINING of sore Throat or Hoarss-
ness should use BRowN's BRONCHIAL. TRoCuIs,
The effect 10 extraordinary, particularly when
used BY singers and speakers for clearing the
voicA
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

Hon. Josh Royal, of the dominion parliament
Will interview Riel and try and persuade him
b cease his mad career:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

4, At Cincinnati Emery's candle factory, one Of
The largest institutions Of the kind In the
country, was burned
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

. The M1icaa congress began IT, session.
President Dias, in his message, giving notice
that bsrrios must bs put down
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

W. II. A. Brown, Of the Chicago board OF
trade, is under arrest on tho charge Of bieamy.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

Coed news ought to b told; and it il good
news that HINTS Remedy has cured tho worst
Of kidsny diseases, and can do it again.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

Minister Cox cannot go to Turkey until hi
finishes book which hs il under contract ID
produce by June l, or no will forfeit $4,000
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

ALIENS IRON Tonic BrrrERs CREATE
nature Of J. p. Allen, Druggist, St. Paul, MINI
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

Ed 9choheld. Of Duluth killed FULL sized
black bear with IN Al
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

A skillet full Of old Spanish coins was
dug up near tho entrance to Harvard college,
Cambridge
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

*<* Delicate diseases radically cured. Con-
M ,altation free: address: Worlds Dispsnsary
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

Bon Davis, . London solicitor, has failed
His liabilities are placed At q, OOO and 1t ID
stated he has ded to Spain
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

0eh Middleton advanced his forces 70 Fort
2u'Appells, and was stopped by the open eas-
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-04-09

II
M nxrDoss Il solely for the legitimate healing 81
afsenee ana tAe relt4f Of pan oad that Il does ell
4 eafs to d. thousands q ladies eas gladly tssty
Il will entirely all Ovarian troubles 1nAaEama.
tioa and liberation Falling aAd Displaesnsnts and
oonsequent Spinal Weakness, ard 10 particularly
aAasssd - the change Of hfe.
Ter ctimuie1ts ana relieves Wssxnsss Of ths Stomach
+ cures 8sestag, Headaches, Nervous frese!afio1n.
eensa. That feeling Of bearing down, causing pain,
and backachA is alway. permanently cured 6y e. us
isa1irJ sadsntsiy answered. For sale at druggsta
. 800 ssse