davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Tho Christmas Tree.
Hsrper's Magazine.

Harper's Magazine.
The custom of decoration by green
plants and flowers in all sorts of festivals
is as old as history, and of course the use
of evergreens at Christmas needs no ex-
PLANTATION, nor is the custom any less
Christian because it is of immemorial
use among pagan nations. The mistle-
toe, however, had unique place. The
Celtic peoples and the Druides held it in
the same veneration that the Romans
did. It was used by the Romans in re-
ligious ceremonies, and it may have been
the golden bough" of the Internal re-.
gious. The Druids gathered it against
the festival of the winter solstice with
great solemnity, the Prince of the Druids
cutting it himself with golden sickle.
1t was used as charm against evil spir-
its, aud excellent medical properties are
ascribed to it. 1t was supposed to pos
sess the power to preserve from poison
and the mystic property of giving fertil-
ity. az issipg under the mistletoe" may
have had reference to this ancient be-
lief. There was a tradition that the
maid who was not kissed under q bough
of mistletoe at Christmas would not be
married during the following year.
There was once notion thatits heather
origin should exclude it from the Christ
mas decorations; but this found no favor
with the young people at any period
On the CONTRARY, they took good care
that it should be hume, and that il should
have plenty of berries, for the ceremony
under it was not duly performed if .
berry was not plucked of with each kiss
and consequently the supply of berries
determined the number Of Kisses. It
did not need the Roman use of the plant
to recommend such a preventive of the
atate of oldmaidism. Some trace tho
use of green bush decoration to the orig
inal branches of verYian among the Re-
mans. With Romans and Druids the
vervian was q panacea for every ill, and
they believed, above all, that it "concil-
lated hearts which were at variance
another good office Of any plant in the
Christmas season. The Druids only ven
Grated the mistletoe that grew on the
oak, but the common mistletoe (viscus
album), with its pearly berries, is gath
cred from the hawthorn, the old apple
tree, the lime and the fine and from
other trees. Oilate years this parasite
has been scarcer than formerly, and eff
forts have been made to propagate it,
This is done by cleaning Of the bark
under any joint of young tree with the
moistened thumb, and then pressing
the glutinous berry on the clesned place
till it adheres to the bark; il will begin
to show growth in about fifteen months.
It il an obvious suggestion that in sec
lions Of the country where the statistics
ahov a falling of in marriages this plant
ought not to Be let out.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
McCune Times: J.L.Frysinper. Iiyi,

McCune Times: J. L. Frysinger, Twin
six mi es north of McCune, informs US he
cut twelve acres of clover this year, re-
alizing two and half tons of hay to the
acre, and he also threshed 24f bushels of
seed cut from the same land. The hay
is worth IS per ton, making$15 per acre,
and two bushels of seed at 81 per bushel
equals $l4 per acre, making total of $29
Der acre. This does not include the
straw threshed and the fall pasture,
which vii. almost pay for the labor of
caring for the crop. Again he has the
advantage of its fertilizing qualities.
This is no doubt the first clover seed
threstfed in Crawford county.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Mr.. Lincoln and = Savings Bank.

Boston BuGget
Mr.. Lincoln was found one morning
by visitor counting several small piles
of greenbacks on his table. "Tnis, sir"
said he noticing the gentleman's sur
prise, rs something out of my usual
line. But president of the United
States has multiplicity Of duties not
specified in the constitution of the acts
of congress. This is one of them. This
money belongs to poor negro who is a
porter in the treasury department, and is
at present very sick with the smallpox.
He did not catch it from me, however;
at least think not.) He is now in the
hospital and could not draw his pay be-
cause he could not sign his name. have
been at considerable trouble to over
come the difficulty and got his money
for him, and have at length succeeded
in cutting red tape, as the newspapers
say, l am now dividing his money and
putting by portion in an envelope, la.
beled with his name, along with my own
funds, according to his wish.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
The Marriage of Evangelist Jones.

The Marriage Of Evargelfst Jones.
Vicksburg Herald.
Rev. Sam Jones whoops up the boys
sometimes and rakes them terribly
about tn cir gambling and drinking frol-
les. "Oh, I've been all along there boys.
1 know all about it, and used to 60 to
balls and dance, too, boys. But when l
wanted to get married, when | wanted
to settle down with good wife, I quit
drinking and gambling, and l didn't 60
to ball room to get my wife, but l went
to a prayer meeting and l got good
one" He told this in Texas, and when
he returned to his boarding house his
landlady, who heard his remarks, said:
II don't blame you, brother Jones, but
poor sister Jones, where did she 60 to
get her husband?" They say this is the
only time he has been foored since he
quit drinking.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
New Mule Joke.
New York Sun

N1W 1Urh sun
In front of one of the blacksmith
shops at Green Cove Springs, Fla, a
young negro was trying to extract a nail
from the hind hoof of an able-bodied
and vicious looking mule. An aged col
ored man came along, watched the oper-
alton for a moment and observed: "Guess
you 90 to Heaven if dat mule kicks you
once" Reckon not" was the reply,
"Whar den?" asked the old man. ''Cl'ar
beyond"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
An Exception.
Texas Siftings.

Texas Siftings.
During conversation about dogs Gus
de Smith made some very enthusiastic
remarks about their intelligence.
"Do you maintain that dogs are more
intelligent than menu" asked Judge Pen
nybunker.
eyes, in many cases." replied Gus.
~ don't believe it."
"Well, I know that I've got just that
kind of dog"
"That doesn't say much for the intelli-
gence of the dog. It's you who are the
exception to the general rule"
And now there yawns social abyss
between the men,
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Vexed Question Settled.

Texas siftings.
Rev. Whangdoodle Baxter undertook
to enlighten dark little Sunday school
kid.
"Who am de fodder of Zsbedee's chill
dren? Talk up now, niggah."
81 dunno. Dey don't lib in our nabor
hood"
What is de name Oh de childruns
what Lbs next doah to yer?"
"Yerger."
"What's de name oh dar fobber?"
"Kurnel Yerger, sab"
"Now, tell me who am de fodder 90
Zsbedee's childruns!"
"Kurnel Yerger, OBJ course"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Lemonade in the West.

Wall Street News
The Children's Aid society sent re-
generated New York newsboy to some
far distant western town. In his days
of sin he had often been RECALLED at ice
cream and lemonade festivals, and had
learned the secret of the concoction of
the latter beverage. So when the glori-
GUS fourth arrived he invested Sill in a
lemonade layout and reaped profit of
$32. Some day he will learn the secret
of watering railroad stock, and then the
finger of pride will be pointed at him all
around.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
A Day and Week.

Morris County Herald
Married, near Belden, Mr.. Amos Day
to Miss Jane Week.
A Day is made, Week is lost,
But time should not complain
For there will soon be Days enough
To make Wees again.
We have had the pleasure of attend
ing many weddings among our circle of
acquaintance, but this caps all when
We take into consideration the amount
of time lost in few moments.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
A Newspspsr Writer'S Work.

Sunday Herald
A rapid penman can write thirty words
in a minnie. To do so he must draw his
pen through toe space of rod, sixteen
pen travels furlong. We make on an
average sixteen curves or turns of the
pen in writing each word. Writing
thirty words in minute, we must make
4S0 turns in each mi ute; in an hour
$4,000; in day OF only five hours IA 900;
in year of 800 such days 43,2o0,OOO
The man, therefore, who made 100000
strokes with his pen was not at all
remarkable. Many men-newspaper
writer's, for instance-mske 100000.
Here we have in the aggregate q mark
$50 miles long to be traced on paper by
such a writer in year.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
A False Friend.

ave lost all faith in human nature"
sighed q West shore conductor to his
wife, as he substituted citizens dress for
blue and gold. "You know what warm
friends Smith and I have been for 60
many years."
"Yes," said the lady.
"Well, he was passenger on my train
to-day for the first time, and I'll be
banged if he didn't buy ticket of the
agent. So much for friendship"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19

was not very hsppy. He could Of had
almost anything he wished to eat, but he
had no appetite. He ehivered most Of
the time, even though he was usually
hidden in warm wraps. OF course he
caught cold easily, and then, oh, dear!
how pitifully he did sneeze.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
GRAND ARMY GLEANNGs.

The post at Oswego gave the "Spy Of
Atlanta" at that city recently to largo
audiences.
A woman's relief corps issoon to be in
stituted at Westmoreland, Po.tawatomie
county.
The old soldiers OF Toledo township.
Chase county, are organizing post Of
the G. A. r.
Humboldt Interstate: At the last
meeting of Vicksburg post No. ~, q good
attendance was had and an interesting
meeting was the result. The post is in
good condition.
Osborne Farmer: The following off,
GERS were elected at the meeting Of the
o. NJ. Mitchell post, G. A. r. held De-
cember I'd, 1885; W. F. Cochran, post
commander; J. A. Beeman, senior vice
commander; L. A. Linville, junior vice
commander; s. B. Farwell, officer Of the
day; HI. F. Hillebrandt. officer of the
guard; 7. E.Ful.z, chaplain; T. B. Boyd,
surgeon; David Ward, quartermaster;
T. 3. Boyd, and David Ward, delegates
to the department encampment.
Wichita Eagle: At the election Of
officers of Garfield Post No., %. held at
the post room the other night, comrade
John Fisher was elected post command
or; comrade B. II. Downing, senior vice
commander; comrade w. w. Sweet,
junior vice commander; comrade II.
Owen, surgeon; comrade N. E. Harmon,
chaplain; comrade G. E. Martin, quar-
cermaster; comrade Geo. E. Harris, Off
Ger of the day, and comrade B. F. Nc
Cullough, officer of the guard,
On the day Vice President Hendricks
was buried two private individuals en-
tered the property room of the G. A. r.
post at Ellsworth, and taking the flag
therefrom hung it at half mast high over
the hall. At their next regular meeting
the post by resolution condemned the
action, claiming that the officers of the
post had no authority to place its flag
at half mast on account of the death of
the vice president for the reason that he
was not a member of the organization
Lakin Democrat: Two old comrades
who had tramped and toiled under the
southern sun, and waded waist deep
through the dismal swamp, and slept
many night under the silvian boughs,
or open skies with its shining stars, met
at the camp fire of the Lincoln Post for
the first time in years, and while those
rough, dark bearded men, met with q
God bless you hearty hand clasp, We i'm
agined we could see loving, almost
womanly sparkling in their yet bright
eyes, that have 80 often seen and sternly
feared death.
Wamego Democrat: The woman's re-
lief corps now numbers forty-six MEM
beers, with four elected for admission at
next meeting. The other evening the
ladies of this corps met with the MEM
bers of o. P. Morton post, and most en-
joyable time was had. Several comrades
gave their experience after first enlisting
for the war; the parting from fathers,
mothers, sisters and sweethearts; first
experience in camp life etc. These social
reunions are prominent features of the
G. A. r. meetings. The deeds of the
heroic women of Kansas, who, often
times alone with their little ones, cult
waited the farm, cared for the return of
their husbands, would fill volumes if
written.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19

Miss Caddie Williams, clandestinely
welded DR.. ]. W. Breen at Mound City,
Linn county, the other day. She was
engaged to be married to an Atchison
lawyer, and tina. worthy had made all
arrangements for the happy event when
Q gay N. D. entered the arena and cap
tured the prize. Miss Williams is the
daughter of respectable parents, and her
family are greatly shocked at the fact
that she broke her faith with the Atch-
ison lawyer. Dr.. Breen, il . we'll known
young doctor Of Linn county, and il
twice % old q his bride.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Worse Than She Thought.

!. Weeping Widow-Yes, poor John met
with q terrible fate. He fell from the
fourth story window and was instantly
killed.
Sympathizing Friend-Dear, dear, and
was it so bad as that, Mrs. Larkins? un-
derstand that he fell only from the third
story window.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
The Tailless Canine,

ArKansas traveller.
1 doan know why er pusson wants ter
cut offer dogs tail. If natur hadn't
wanted de dog ter had CT tail she would'n
hab gin him one. It's or pityful sight
ter see er glad dog trr ter wsg his tail
when he amt got none. It puts me in
mind DER man dat hab los bot arms
tryin' ter shake hans wild or frien'.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Age Before Veraci.y.

New York Sun.
Husband-"The census-taker was in,
dear. He demanded the age of each of
the family, and I was obliged to give
him yours. He said it was the law"
Wife (enraged) Law! What do I care
for law? John Smith, did you tell that
man my age?" Husband (hurrledly)-
Eyes, told him you we're twenty-three."
Wife (molifed) -"Well, 1 suppose the
lew las got to be respected"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
OutgrowinS tho Slipper.

Mamma" said young Bobby, with q
thoughtful air, what did you mean by
telling papa that I had outgrown my
slippers?" II meant that you are getting
to big for them, Bobby" "Well, then,"
went on Bobby, show long will it be be.
fore outgrow your slippers"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Ceramic Rowing Note.
Boston Con

Boston Courier.
The conversation passed from patching
to sculling, and one of the gentlemen
asked an osrsman: "Did Courtney ever
race for cup?" "No," was the reply,
but I have heard of him in connection
with saw, sir"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Too Cheap to Steal.

Somerville Journal
Customer-"Aren't you afraid to leave
all these clothes hanging along the side
walk with nobody to watch them? I
should think you would be afraid some
body would steal them" Dealer
"Stheal doze Clothes? mein Himmel, no!
Confidently w, mein friend, dell you,
I sells doze clothes so sheap that id
dosen't bay to stheal them"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
A Car Porter 8 Frishtfai Look

Chicago Herald.
Il have travelled q good deal in my
time, remarked an elderly man. Il have
been in railway accidents, explosions,
battles, the craters of volcanoes, Kansas
cyclones and African simoons, but never,
no, never, did have my breath knocked
GUS of me and my senses completely
dazed as they were a few minutes ago."
"How did it happen?"
"Why, gave the sleeping car porter
a quarter and asked for fifteen Genus
change. The look he gave me made me
seasick."
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19
Has Heard from NewYork.

Allenton Register.
On Wednesday morning Sam Lee
walked into court at Easton and said he
wanted to become q citizen of the
United States. Sam was asked: "Do you
intend to return to China?" and said:
ms no 60 back; me democlat"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1885-12-19

The Livermore brass band gaye Q
band-concert at Hartford Centre on Fri
day evening. November 26, which was q
financial success, The receipts from the
concert was $3.50.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29

is absolutely free from petty worries or troubles, and it is extremely cheap. It is singular fact that your idler will invariably be found to prefer the plainest diet, such as eggs, fish, mutton chops, and salads. Simplicity of existence i'm mediately creates simplicity of taste. We would not go so far altogether as to for. bid the idler a book. Thackeray's Miscellanies and Dickens Sketches " are capital companions. So is a stray volume of Trollope. A genuine novel, with plot, involves too leng. continued attention. We have, however, known idlers ot arch9 ological bent who never miss the parish church, They look at all the tombstones and all the monuments, take note of the architecture, the church plate, furniture, and fittings, and prob. ably consult some of the old registers. S. For those who like it, this is as pleasant work and fully as easy as admiring the landscape or watching the ships pass up and down. It ought to be added that for the discovery of this particular form of highly intellectual idleness, the public is largely indebted to Lord Selborne, who has often pointed out how much of our English history is hidden in our old par ish churches.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
A Daily Dedication.

The Hon. John Kelly, the head and front of Tammany Hall, a man of strict integrity an indefatigable worker, early at his office, late to leave, SO burdeued with business that regular meals were sell dom known by him, with mind in con- stant tension and energies steadily trained finally broke downi
 The wonder is that he did not sooner give way. An honest man in all things else, he acted unfairly with his physical resources. He was ever drawing upon this bank without ever depositing a col- lateral The account overdrawn, the bank suspends and both are now in the hands of medical receivers.
 1t Is not work that kills men. It is ir- regularity of habits and mental worry. No man in good health trets at his work. Bye and bye when the bank of vigor sus- pends, these men will wonder how it all happened, and they will keep wondering until their dying day unless, perchance, some candid physician or interested friend will point out to them how by irregular ity, by excessive mental effort, by con- stant worry and fret, by plunging in deep CT than they had right to go, they have produced that loss of nervous energy which almost Invariably expresses itself in deranged condition of the kidneys and liver, tor it is well-known fact that that the poison which the kidneys and liver should remove from the blood, if left therein, soon knocks the life out of the strongest and most vigorous man or woman. Daily building up of these vital organs by so wonderful and highly re- puted specific as Warner's safe cure, is the only guarantee that our business men can have that their strength will be equal to the labors daily put upon them.
 MT. Kelly has nervous dyspepsia, we learn, indicating, as we have sad, break down of nerve force. His case should be warning to others who, pursuing a like course, will certainly reach like re- sult.-zHe Sunday Heyold.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
Brain Work and Hand Labor.
IExchange.l


 The notion that those who only labor with their brain need less food than those who labor with their hands is faIlacious. Mental labor causes greater loss of tissue than muscular. According to careful es- inmates three hours of hard study wear out the body more than a whole day of hard physical exertion. Without phos- phorus, no thought" is German say. ing and the consumption of that essen- tial ingredient of the brain increases in proportion to the amount of labor which the organ is required to perform. The wear and tear of the brain are easily measured by careful examination of the salts in the liquid excretions. The im- portance of the brain as working organ is shown by the amount of blood it re- ceives, which is proportionately greater than that of any other part of the body. One-6fth of the blood goes to the brain, though its average weight is orly-ene- fortieth the weight of the body. This fact alone would be suf6 ient to prove that brain workers need more food, and better food, than mechanics and farm laborers.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
THE QUARREL OF FRIENDS.
BY S. T. CoLERIDGE.

Alas they had been friends in youth: But whispering tongues can poison truth; And constancy lives in realms above; And life is thorny, and youth is vain And to be wroth with one we love Doth work like madness in the brain. And thus it chanced. as divine, With Roland and Sir Leoline. Each spoke words of high disdain And insult to his hearts best brother They parted-ne'er to meet again But never either found another To free the hollow heart from paining. They stood aloof. the scars rem aiming. Like cliffs that had been rent asunder. dreary sea now flows between, But neither heat, nor frost, nor thunder, Shall wholly do away, ween, The marks of that which once hath been
 -Od Magdsine.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
MISCELLANEOUS COMICS.

Which Donkey Shall ITakef A Mule Train on an Up-Grade. A Mule Train on Down-Grade. A Lovely Calm. A Black SqualL Walked Home on His Ear. His Mother-in-Law. The Twin Monkeys. The Course of True Love-CatA Music Hath Charms-Cats. When Shall We Three Meet Again Steeple-Chase Cracks-Monkeys. The Jolly Hunters-Monkeya Bending Her Beau. Everything Lovely-Donkey. No One to Love Me-Donkey. We've Had Healthy Time-Monkey and The Miseries of Bachelor. rpa,,o, The Blessings of Wife. "i0~ The Pet of the Fancy. The Pet of the Ladies. The Height of Impudence. Trust Me Till Sell My Dorg. A Capital Joke. The Esthetic Craze. The Erica brac Mania. Ohi Dat Water Million. The Shoemaker's Circus. A Put up Job A Fall From Grace. A Surprise Party. A Change of Base. Eating Crow on Wager-The first braca Eating Crow on Wager-The last lap De Cake Walk. De Lime Kiln Club-A Temperance racka A Dude Belle. A Dude Swell. The Washers. Brandy Smash. Rye and Rock. Any Port in Storm Warming Up. A Skin Game-Shoemaker. A Skinner Skinned-Shoemaker. I he Darktown Fire Brigade-Io o the Rescua The Darktown Fire Brigade-Saved. Brer Thuldy's Statute-Liberty Frichtenin'
 de World.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29

There is such thing as being smoth- cred in honey. A Kansas editor recently drew prize in lottery, and the very same day his wife had twins-both boys - his mother in-law was killed by light hing while in transit to pay him visit, and man who had owed him So for sub scrption sent in the money.-7 Troy Pyess.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
COMIC ATHLETIC AND BOATING

Creating sensation-Bicycle, Spelling Sensation-- {" The Graces of the Bicycle. A Base Hit-Base Ball. A Foul Tip !"
 De Tug Ob War. Done Gone Busted. The Champion in Danger-Rowine. The Champion in Luck The Skating Carnival. 1T The Great Walk-Go as you please. n ne Great Walk-Come in as you can. Won by a foot--Walking Match. Amateur Muscle in the Shell. Caved in the Busted Sculler The Champion Rowist
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
COMIC RIFLE SHOOTING.

Crack Shots in Position.
 A Sharp Shooter-with bulge on the rife. A Sharp Rie-with bulge on the shooter. E Furious Unum-"A Yankee trick" Gsod." Erin Go Bragh-"A bul's-eye for the ould The Queens Own-"Wimhledon style." The Highland Fling-"A Bonnie shot for a
 canne Scot"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-29
Something Special.
Philadelphia News.l

50 you think of becoming lawyer ?" observed the jadge, kin 1ly.
 " Yes" replied young Mir. Badger. "I think will become an expert in some line of practice. What would you ad- vice me to become an expert in? ?"
 " think" replied the judge, "there is a great opportunity for young man to rise who becomes an expert in law"