Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-10-16
When Baby Wears Boots.

HIS u VOlu Ill our hearts lnaJ nOlillHS
else can occupy. Except good fish
ing, what is more delightful than to
watch the actions of a little child or
to hear it lisp its first words in must
cal accents? Its childish prattle
amuses and at the same time touches
the tenderest chords of our hearts
with soft thrill, and its innocent
smile softens even the heart of a
plumber. It's caressing touch, as
pure as an angels, makes the soul
glad with tender joy that is only
equallcd by the mad delirum of own
ing a $4,000 dog.
These philosophical reflections were
inspired OIL seeinga young father and
mother with their first baby on the
cars. The infant was perfect beau
ty, its big blue eyes looking out at
the passengers from under a little
hood with a serious sDlemnity conf
cal to see. It's hair, of light brown
color, was parted and hung down
each side of its eyes, giving it an old
fashioned air,and it was moreover the
picture of health. The father held il
on his knee, drawing now and then
the white shawl closer around the
form of his darling offspring and the
mother squeezed close in tender sOli-
tude, of all of which nonsense the
baby saw nothing and cared less l
watched the trio with great interest,
nothing escaped my observation.
The parents observed every motion
and exchanged glances of proud ex-
ultation as they perceived the passen-
gers Catching on" to the beauty they
had given the world. Every little
while the found young father hug
ged the little darling rapturously to
his breast and when the child opened
its rosy mouth and said, "Ba-ba- ba-
ba," his chest filled out and he held
his head up more proudly, as he
glanced around TO see the effect smil-
ing triumphantly at his wife as the
prodigy repeated the feat. Their
pride in being the joint proprietors
of 80 much loveliness was delicious
10 behold. One of the female passen-
gers having remarked, in tones that
were audible throughout the car, that
"pretty children always grew into
homely adults" the fathers face
flushed as he looked at his offspring
with an adoring glance that showed
he did not believe in the old saying
"Ah," | thought, with unutterable
sadness in my breast, "wait old boy,
until that child gets on his legs Evi-
IDENTITY you're in luck just now, fol
you have healthy, bouncing baby
who sleeps nights. You don't have t,
get up al impromptu undress parade
at . o'clock in the morning, or chase
the elusive paregoric bottle aroumc
the house when the Thermometer
marks zero right alongside the stove
but wait, repeat, till that child
whom you know in your heart is cut
out for the President of these United
States from the civil-service expires
sion of its serious eyes, lets himsel
loose on your premises and file
around for eighteen hours III twenty
four. Wait until he sets off matche
under the parlor table. Will you
smile so fondly when he climbs III
and pulls all the tail feathers out o
the canary bird eats the shoe-black
ing and puts the brush, with you
soft hat, on the top of a red-ho stove
or when he takes the scissors ant
trims the fur all off your Gordon set
ter, which you have just fixed NJ
for the dog show, and makes hin
look as if moths had been at him, ell
Will you he tickled and 60 out ant
roll with laughter on the grass
Hey? | guess not. I've been there
Maybe you'll think it funny whel
your ncighbor comes in with clul
and tells you softly, so that he can b
heard all through the whole ward
that your kid has scratched his dea
child's eyes out, or thrown a ston
through the parlor window am
broken Benvenuto Cellini lamp
How about the time when he put
your watch in the sink and runs wa
ter on it2 Will you smile then
win you utter whoops of deligh
when you come upstairs and fin,
him playing with your razor, wavin
the deadly toy in the air, while ev
cry flash of light reflected from il
glittering blade strikes through you
quivering heart like ba arb How
about the sensation you'll have whcl
he takes your silk hat out and carrie
sand and gravel in it for half a day
All these things and more he'll dc
this young, healthy kidlet of your.
When he grows older and goes OF
starring tours in the ueighbor's frui
garden, and tears gigantic holes i
the basement of his knee breeche
getting over fences, or goes swim
ming and is brought home in a dirt
cart halfdrOwned and all his clothe
stolen except one little rumplet
stocking, will you indulge in thes
paroxysms of mirth Not much II
iell you what you'll do. You wi
take this scion of a noble family b.
his pink, shell-like ear, and liftin
him from the ground, lead him {
the retirement which the woodshe,
affords. Then you'll fondle him wit
a strap or club, and tan his it'll
hide, while he yels so that the neigh
hors think you are killing something
and his mother, standing by wit
tears in her blue eyes, feels ever
blow more than If she really Dor
them OH her own tender flesh, am
gathers him to her bosom after til
matinee is over and sobs in uniso
with her bad, bad boy. Then your
20 in the house, and when your oil
friend of years and years comes in t
see you you'll both sit and tell of tll
leviltry you committed when vol
were boys until that sons eyes sticl
out in amazement as he thinks of Tn
walloping he got for doing the sam
things that very day. And the
after it is all over you will
go out, get in a car and seeing
young couple with their bran-nev
baby you will indulge in the sam
philosophical reflections to which
have treated You in the foregoing
freely and literally out of my owl
experience. w. ii. MCDouGALL.