Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1885-02-20
HUM0R OF THE DAY.
great wag-a dogs tail.

great Wag-a dogs tail.
A rolling mill-a rough and tumble
prize fght.-BostOn Star.
A musical journal tells how violin
practicing may be enjoyed. BY becom-
Ing deaf, we presume.
''There is no place like your home"
says the poet. Right! unless it's the
home of the young woman you're after.
A COW at Moline, ILL.,, got drunk on
distillery grains and made an interest
ing display of corned beef. - Chicago Sun.
Marriage promotes longevity among
men Notwithstanding its tendency to
produce premature badness Boston
Courier.
The camel is the only bird we yearn
to hear warble, after listening to man
learning to play the violin. .-FaU RiUer
AdUance.
A Cincinnati editor claims to have
seen petrifed girl. She probably dis
covered tnat some rival belle had bon
net exactly like hers.
Pearl necklaces are down so cheap this
year that a fine one can be bought for
$12, 900. Everything seems to favor the
poor man.-Free Press.
"The best thing to give your enemy is
forgiveness remarks a philosopher.
This is particularly the case if your
enemy happens to be larger than you
are.
The dress-coat is generally worn by
the groom at the city wedding; "but
/ for oil
transcript, "there's nothing like the cut
away
President Arthur goes out of the White
House with deep, dark secret in his
bosom. No man knows who sews on
Mr.. Arthur's suspender buttons. - COar-
ier-JOuynaJ
"When will your mistress return?"
asked the caller-informed that madam
was out. Cant say, SIR" said James.
"When she sends me down to say she's
out, l can never be sure"
Everything in its place-A patch on
the face is thought to enhance ones
Leauty, but patch on the panta-
looms of the small boy is an ever present
modification Boston Transcript.
An article in New England paper is
headed, Glow to Reach Young Men,"
The father of several manageable daugh-
ters in this city have adopted the plan of
reaching them with their boots. Puck.
--'Tis sweet to sit by the banyan tree,
And play on the scented Iutes;
And feel the wasps, so joyous and fres,
As they play hide and seek in your boots.
- Gorhana Mountatleer.
J London proposes to hold a worlds
fair couple of years hence. 1t is safe
TO predict that the managers will not
clamor for Philadelphia's old liberty bell
to place on exhibition. .-N0rist0aon Her.
aid.
! A boy, digging for skunk, in Ian
caster County, Penn, found lump of
mineral which old miners aver to be gold.
That's just a boys luck; any other per-
son would have found the skunk
omaha Republican.
! A prudent man advised his drunken
servant to put by his money for rainy
day. In few weeks his master inquired
how much he had saved. Faith, none
at all, said he; lit rained yesterday
and it all went"
He had hired new servant when he
went down to the office in the morning,
and on his return home at night asked
"Well, dear, is the new girl going all
right2" "Going2 She went two hours
ago." was the prompt answer Boston
Post
What is life but wishing! 4
What is life but sorrowl
What is life but waiting
For Tomorrow
Thus waileth he, grief-burdened,
Heart broken, lone and sad
Thus waileth he who's lost his
Liver pad,
M