The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1885-05-22
CAPTAIN BRANDY'S BET.

Few cargo steamers were III Jne udDlI
of making the passage between New
York and Liverpool quicker than the
'Picayune," Captain Hosea E. Bart
lett; and few men we're prOuder of their
craft than was Hosea E. Bartlett of the
"Picayune." Bartlett was a New Eng
lander, a typical long-legged, hatchet-
faced, wiry-haired, keen-eyed, New
Eng&uder.
America" said he, "bosses creation,
sir, apl New England boys boss Ameri-
ca, an that's a fact"
Upon July 10, 1888, the "Picayune
was announced to sail from the foot of
West Tenth street for Liverpool. Upon
the preceding evening Captain Hosea
F.. Bartlett was seated in the Oriental
saloon, a famous house of call for skip
pers and gentry interested in shipping,
smoking a very big cheroot, and occa-
sionally slipping a John Collins" at his
elbow. He had a coutented expression
in his face, for ne mad a full cargo atB
full season when freight was going beg
ging, he'd shipped his crew and did not
expect to have to whistle for more than
three absentees at the hour of starting,
and he was going to see his English
wife who had settled for a while in Liv-
erpool.
TO him enter Captain Brandy, of the
British steamer "Cockney." =.
Just as the "Picayune" was famous
for her smart passages, so was the
"Cockney" celebrated as being one ofthe
''slowest of tubs on the pond" Hence
it was that American Bartlett and Brit
ish Brandy met without exchang-
ing some lively chaff and repartee, al.
though they were the best of friends.
Hello, Brandy When's the old
m'Iasses tub on" was Bartiett's greet
ing.
."The British steamer Cockney. Bran
DIV, master, sails tomorrow morning.
July 10, as ever was" replied Brandy.
sand dye reckon she'll maze Liver
pool this side o. Christmas ?" asked Bart
lett, with a twinkle in his eye.
To-day fortnit she brings up along
side o. the quay" said Brandy.
The Yankee skipper burst into q
scornful chuckle.
Captain Brandy called for a "Bour-
bon, leisurely Lit a clay pipe, took a
few whias and q SIP, rested his chin On
his hands as he leaned forward, and
said:
Bartlett, you reckon yourself tol'ble
spry. don't yer?"
wall" replied the American, az
guess / know the difference between a
jay bird and a caboose. an / amt likely
20 mistake the CROWN OF a shanty-town
cock for Hail, Columbia and that's a
fact"
"There amt nothin' al goes out of the
port Of, New York as can whip the
Picayune.'" continued Brandy.
mo, ] reckon there amt" said Bart
lett.
lyon wouldn't like to put a hundred
pound on a little notion of mine, would
you? n said Brandy.
"Barrin' the Cockney,' / don't mind
If Lido" replied Bartlett.
aThtaf's right, 7 said Brandy. Look
here you're always a-pokin' fun at the
sCockney.' Well, I'll bet yer a hundred
pound that I see Mrs. Bartlett before
you do
ay~. L brn5~a5 ro,rnd
British, that you see the missis in Liver
pool before / do?" repeated Bartlett.
"An' the Cockney' sails by first tide to-
morrer mornin'g
That = So 2 said Brandy.
ssBarrin' all mail steamersY said
Bartlett.
aBarrin' all mail steamers" said
Brandy.
aDone with You, boss" said Bart,
lett.
So the wager was cemented over /
fresh supply Of drinks, after which
Captain Brandy walked out, wishing
the American skipper Good night"
"Derned fool. that Brandy" said tn
American to himself.
In the mis.s of early morning th.
"Picayune" cleared out. So did tn
AGockney."
Somehow or other, news Of the wage
had leaked out, and general opinio
indorsed that of Captain Bartlett, al
Though others guessed that Brand
wasn't the sort to GO singing ava,
flO0 for a mere notion, and that Ii
knew what he was doing.
AZ seven bells-half past 7 ia til
morning-Captain Bartlett, on th
bridge of the APicayuns," q cheroot !