davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
Ridge Flowing

We are too apt to neglect to secure
the advantages We might have from the
beneficent freezing which our northern
soil receives every winter. The autumn
rains level off the surface of the ground
and compact ii so that the frosts have
comparatively little action. When the
surface is frequently frozen and thawed,
the amount Of stony matter rendered
fine and soluble is something surprising.
Any one may easily test this in good
winter weather, by taking basinful Of
small stones, selected from the soil,
washing them clean in pure rain water,
to freezing and thawing on a window
sill. There should he enough water to
a little more than simply moisten the
pebbles, and on the outside of window
with southern exposure, the water
viii freeze hard at night and thaw when
the sun shines. When the water finally
evaporates, the basin and the lowcrmost
pebbles will be found whitened with an
incrustation of substances dissolved out
of the stones, mixed with more or less
grit which has crumbled off from the
surface Of the stones.
If the land is thrown into ridges by
the plow, in autumn, the same effects
of freezing and thawing 60 on for a
good part of the winter ON land not
deeply covered with snow. When the
snow falls, it will perhaps cover the
whole ground; but after few days, the
tops Of the ridges will appear, and then
the freezing and thawing will 60 on.
The ridges on Hat land should run east
and west, hut on sloping ground, where
there would he danger Of washing, they
should he up and down the slope. -
Mason &. VII u in .la. Iglir0itW;st
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
A Valuable Medical Treatise.

The edition for 1886 of the sterling
medical annual, known as Hostetter's
Almanac, is now ready, and may be
obtained, free of cost. of druggists and
general country dealers in all parts OF
the United States, Mexico. and indeed
in every civilized portion of the Western
Hemisphere. This almanac has been
issued regularly at the commencement
of every year for over onc-fifth of cen.
tury. 1t combines. with the soundest
practical advice for the preservation and
restoration of health, large amount of
interesting and amusing light reading,
and the calendar, astronomical calcula.
tions, chronological items, &c, are pre-
pared with great care, and will be found
entirely accurate. The issue of Hostct-
ters' Almanac for 1886 will probably be
the largest edition of medical work
ever published in any country. The
proprietors, Messrs. Hostetter E Co.,
Pittsburgh, Pa, OIL receipt of two
cent stamp, will forward n copy by mail
TO any person who cannot procure one
in his neighboThood. dec.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
HofenStein on Politics.
HE INsTRUCTs HERMAN on THE INTRI-
CACIEs OF TIE CASE,

HE INsTRUCTs HERMAN on THE INTBI-
CACIEs OF THE CASE.
''NIisder Hoffensteln," said Herman
to his employer, as the two sat in the
front of the store, waiting for custom
er, 81 vas dalking to Levi Loenburg,
vat lives on Magazine street, und he
dells me dat he vas going to work for a
position in de customhouse, und go In
hefy for bolidics und be shust so big as
any oder man in de town"
"Vell, Herman" said Uoffenstein,
rehectively, 81 dinks he will do more
better If he keeps init his uncle in de
dry goods pisiness, you know. Bolitics
vas shust so much like horse race dot
ven You dinks you haf de sure ding you
gifts sold out so gwick dot your head
syims und you go around und your
friend dinks dot you haf de gonsump-
tion. a man, Herman, vot don't haf
blenty uf money don't haf no more
show den blind man in shumplng
match. Money is dc ding vat gets de
worm und knocks de bersimmon avaw,
und ven YOU IFS as long as me, Her
man, you finds dot out you know und.
like wise child vat 1ocks togedder you
stay NIT de cloding pisiness. Bolitics
vas like a ding vat dakes blace yonce
ven vas in Vicksburg, und vat shows
dot You don't can always dell ven you
haf vindfall."
"Vat vas dat, Misder Hoffenstein?"
inquired Herman.
'Nel. you see, Herman, We gets up a
foot race nit Moses Goldstein, vat Ifs
in Vicksburg, und Solomon Loeb, vat
vas in Bort Gibson. We all knows that
Moses Goldstein can run right away nit
Loeb, and We puts up dc shob shust to
vim Jacob Rosonfeld,s money, vat vas
betting on Loeb. All uf us dinks dat
We haf a soft ding, und Rosonlield smells
someding und goes to Goldstein und
dclls him If lie loses de race dot he gets
dwendY dollars, und Goldstein dakes de
money und vinks, und We don't know
anyding about it, you know. De day
ven de race vas, We starts Goldstein und
Loeb even togedder, und shakes our
money und bets dree to Won dot Gold
stein wins. Goldstein runs couple uf
yards ahead uf Loeb, und efery Won
dinls he vas a sure winner, but ven he
gets near de end uf de drack he sees a
pile uf shavings dere, und he snorts
shust like Wild horse, und kicks his
legs away up NIT lie air und runs out in
woods und Loeb wins de race, und lose
more as dree hundred dollars, und vas
mad dot my eyes vas shust so green as
de grass, you know. Dink, Herman,
how dat tam tief Goldsten sells us out
und svindlesw
Don't you make Goldestcin say vat
for he does dat, Mister Hoffenstein?
said Herman, who was indignant.
Yes, We gets him by de collar and
asks him Wy he runs de road out, und
Wy he don't win de race, und he says;
Wy you leave dat bile of shayings right
by de place we're | runs? You know
dat vas young and would get scared
NIT the shOvings, and shump from the
trock away. Dat vas all dc satisfaction
vot we gets, Herman, und dat vas about
all de satisfaction dat dey gif a man ven
dey sells him out in bolitics,' and Hot
fenstein sauntered out on the sidewalk,
and left Herman to reflect on what he
| had said,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
No Pate nt-No Pay.
PATENTS

obtained for Inventors in the United States
Canada and Europe, at reduced rates. With
our principal once located in Washington,
directly opposite the United States Patent
Once, we are able to attend to ali patent
business with greater promptneFs and de
spatch and at less cost than other patent at
torneys who are at Q distance from Wash
ington. and who have, therefore, to employ
- associate attorneys" We make preliminary
examinations and furnish opinions as TO ma
tentabllty, free of charge, and all who are
interested In new inventions and lAtents arc
invited to send for a copy OF our 'Nuide for
obtaining Patents" which is sent free 10
any address, and contains cOmnlete instTuo.
tions how TO obtain patents and other valaa.
BILE matter. We refer to the German-Am msP-
lean National Bank Washington, ID. q. tho
Royal Swedish. Norwegian and Danish LegA
tiOns, at Washington Hon. Jos. casey, late
Chief Justice u. s. Court OF claims; to the
Otficials OF tho u. 5 Patent Once, and to
Senators and Members Of Congress from
every State,
Address; LOUIS BAGGER& Co, So
licitors Of Patents and AttorneysatLAW Le-,
Droit Building WAsHlEGTaE. ID. q,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
A Cloud Of Witnesses.

In many instances the opium-eating
habit has been contracted through the
use Of narcotics, prescribed by physicians
during SICKNESS. Many remedies which
claim to cure coughs contain morphia
or opium, and it can easily be under
stood what bad effect they must have
on children. The new remedy
Star Cough Cure, is entirely free from
these dangerous ingredients, and the
mass of testimony which has already
been collected in its favor from all parts
of the country is proof of its wonderful
purity and efficacy.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
An Important Discovery.

The most important Discovery is that
which brings the most good to the great.
est number DR.. Kings New Discovery
for Consumption, Coughs and Colds,
will preserve the health and save life
and is priceless boon to the afflicted
Not only does it positively cure Con
sumption, but Coughs, Colds, Bronchitis
Asthma, Hoarseness, and all affections
of the Throat, Chest, and Lungs, yielc
at once to its wonderful curative powers
If you doubt this, get trial bottle free
at T. d. Thomas drug store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

If your life is made burden owing to
blacllhcads, pimples and other eruptions
on the face marring your beauty and
causing 50 much chagrin, it is no longer
necessary to endure it. DR. Flaggs
Family Ointment will certainly remove
all such blcmishcs and leave your skin
soft, smooth and beautiful. Sold by all
druggists and mailed on receipt of price,
20c. Williams Mfg. Co., Props,
Cleveland, o. Sold at Thomas drug
store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

Nou have often seen women with
marked bluemesS or paleness of face.
ritiated appetites, and a craving for un-
wholesome food. These are signs of a
diSordered liver, and the trouble must
be corrected or worse results are sure to
follow, Husbands and fathers cannot
afford to treat this matter lightly. DR..
kcnnedy's 'Fsyorite Remedy which
dispels liver disease, costs less than sick
wives and daughters. Eou will find it
a very profitable investment.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

The pain and misery suffered by those
who are afflicted with dyspepsia are in
describable. The distress of the body
is equalled or surpassed by the confusion
and tortures of the mind, thus making
its victims suffer double alfiiction. The
relief which is given by Hoods Sarsa-
pariila has caused thousands to be
thankful for this great medicine. 1t
dispels the causes of dyspepsia, and
tones up the digestive organs. Try
Hoods Sarsaparilla.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

A Sioux chief is learning how to
ride the bicycle, and the final extermi-
nation of the aboriginal race is now on
ly matter of time.
BE at least as polite to father and
mother as you are to others; for they
are more important to you than any
other.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

~ novel has just been announced
with the title I'm IIaying Time" We
suppose it must have a grass plot.
In England they are still in fear of
the dynamiters, and a man dare not
blow up his wife without exciting SITS
picion.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

There are 100000 piano players in
this country. We haye much to be
thankful for; it might be l0,OOO,OO or
even more.
Chicago pic bakers live only fifteen
years. DO their customers murder
them, or do they eat of their own pies.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

When dose Of Vinegar Bitters is
taken into the stomach, all diseases Of
the blood, liver, heart, kidneys, stomach
and body generally. begin to pack up,
preparatory to leaving the system. Ard
II doesn't take them long to pack either
Like the guests that Mrs, Macbeth dis
persed, they "stand not upon the order
al going, but go at once"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
Piles ! Piles Piles

Sure cure for blind, bleeding and
itching piles. One box has cured the
worst case of 20 years standing. No one
need suffer five minutes after using
Williams Indian Pile Ointment. 1t alb
serbs tumors, allays itching of the pli-
vate parts, nothing else. Sold by drug
gists and mailed on receipt of price, 81.
Williams Mfg. Co., Props, Cleveland,
o. Sold at Thomas drug store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

A Philadelphia lady says that if
you will trim your finger nails every
Friday, you will never have the tooth
ache. She has practised it for over
twenty years, and it has never failed.
n. B.-She wore false teeth.
The Car only eats one meal day
and he doesn't eat that until it has been
examined under powerful microscope
and tried on the cat.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
Fresh Complexions,

If you have humors and pimples, ,boils
and eruptions, it is because the system
needs toning and purifying. Nothing
will give you such good health, smooth
and fresh skin and vigorous feeling as
simmons Liver Regulator.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
MISCELLANEOUS.
II must be exncnsive living

1t must he expensive living
For the angels up in the sky,
For we all lmow,both saint and sinner
That a rent in cloud is high.
- can tell says Jenkins, 'when
little hoy has marriagable sisters by
the attention which he receives from
young men,"
The man who knows himself is n
graduate from the school of experience.
Don't say there is no help for catarfh.
hay fever and cold in the head, since
thousands testisy that Ely's Cream
Balm has entirely cured them, II STU
persedes the dangerous use Of liquids
and snuffs. 1t is easily applied with
the finger and gives relief at once.
Price 30 cents.
] was troubled with chronic catarrh
and gathering in head; was deaf at times
had discharges from ears, unable to
breathe through nose. Before the sec
ond bottle OF Ely's Cream Balm was
exhausted was cured G. j. Corbin,
023 Chestnut St, Philadelphia.
-"Do you think Johnnie is contract
ing bad habits at school?' asked Mrs.
Caution OF her husband. "No, my
dear, don't. think he is expanding
them" was the reply.
What cord is that which is full of
knots which no one can unite, and in
which no one can tie another? A cord
of wood.
None more impaticntly suffer iniur-
les than those who are most forward in
doing them to others.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
MIssIssIPPIAN's LITTLE ARTIFICE.

4 MIssIssIPPIAN'S LITTLE ARTIFICE.
A few days ago arich planter boarded
a steamer of Matchez. He purchased a
paper from a newsboy and was soon lost
in its perusal,
"Colonel," said bland young man,
few moments after, you have just
dropped this, handing him tifty-dollar
note.
i reckon not, said the old gentleman,
as he overlooked his spectacles.
4 just picked it up under your chair,
replied the young man, and see no
other way to dispose of it. However
since it belongs to neither of us, We
might just as well divide it,"
The plan worked well. The old gem
tleman passed over s25 in change, and
the young man carelessly sauntered out
on land. A few minutes after the yes
sci had taken to water the old gentleman
presented the $50 note to the clerk in
payment for his fare,
Counterfeit exclaimed the clerk,
and then for the first time the whole
truth dawned upon the old mans mind.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

No man who eats onions can keep
the habit a secret. II will leek out
some way.
-Schoolmarm-Whst is the poetical
name of ancient Greece Pupil-Oleo-
margarine.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

There's nothing like Dr. Thomas
Erlcclric oil to quickly cure cold ur
relieve hoarseness. Written by Mrs.
VI, j. Fellows, Burr Oak, st. Joseph
couHiy, Mich.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

RnPTTTREeured BY our astrIgsnt
IL ~ 4 = " 6Lotion Powder. Safe,
sure, cure q 90. by mail with full dirse-
tiOnS book for cent stamp. PEET a 90.
sol Sixth Avenue, New YORK. dee7I-lY
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
THE NARROW ESCAPE
or a Massaohusetts Engineer.


Sleep alter fuligue aud health after di-
sense are two ol the sweetest experiences
SHOWN to man Fourteen years is long
time to suffer, vet Mr., Peter Lawler, Of
Dalton, Mass, had led miserable lilo for
that Period through the presence Of stone.
in the bladder lie did obtain temporary
relief, but nothing more. Last JANUARY he
called on DR.. David Kennedy, of Rndout,
N. y, WIN said, alter an examination,
Mr.. Lawler, you have stone in the blad.
der. We viii first try DIR, DAVID KEN
NEDY'S FAVORTE REMEDY. before
risking an operation" A few DAYS later
the following letter passed through the
Rcndout post office:
DALroS, Mass Feb 6.
DGAR DR. KENNEDY: The day after I
came home passed two gravel stones, aud
am doing nicely now. PErER LAwLEp.
nr. Kennedy now has the stones at Ills
office, and they are sufficiently torn idahle
io Justify the claim that KENNEDY'S
FAVORtTE REMEDY is the leading
specific for stone in the bladder. In his
letter Mr.. Lawler mentions that FAVOR.
irF REMEDY also cured him OF rhenma.
tism. The subjDned certificate tells its
own story
OLD BEREsHiRE Mills.
DALTON, Mass April 81, $50
Mr.. Peter b,wler has been n resident Of
III is town for the past seventeen years, and
IN our employ for fifteen, and in all these
years he has been good and respected
citizen in this town and community. He
hus had some chronic diseases TO our
know edge for most of the tune, but now
claims to be, amt is, in apparent good
health. CnAs. BRowN, President.
- a bottle six for IS. III druggists.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
A VERY EAKLY MEMORY.

She was slight and girllsh looking
with comlcal affectation of motherli-
ness which made her dart after her blue
eyed three-year-old girl whenever the
little thing came within even ten feet of
the edge of the deck. He was evidently
not far past his majority and divided his
line between tightly twisting slight
moustachc and proudly watching the
frolics of his child and girl-wife.
They were on the upper forward deck
of one of the iron steamboats, going down
the bay to Coney Island in the afternoon
and the other passengers near them for
got to read the afternoon papers or the
latest tips on the races while they lis
tened to the prattle of the child.
As the boat was passing Robbins Reef
The little girl, who had been dancing
around on one foot and calling to the
sea gulls that were floating overhead,
suddenly uttered piercing scream that
made her mothers face grow pale. Then
she turned buried her head in the ma
ternal lap, and began to weep as if her
heart was already broker. All the ladies
on the deck gathered around her and
helped the frightened mother try to find
The wicked pin that must have buried
itself to the head somewhere in the
child's body, while the father forgot to
twist his moustache and looked on help
lessly,
But no pin was to be found.
Not for several minutes could the lit
tie one be induced to raise her head, but
finally she showed her flushed and tear
streaked countenance.
All the ladies asked at once what was
the matter.
81 was-only thinking said she, be-
tween her sobs, chow it hurt-me-
when was borned and fell-all the way
Observation-Disclosures"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

Selfish men are decorous. They
forget themselves.
u i- the man who does the most
hlpWius Nho IAN riisr ihr ~ ind
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

Subscribe for the CARBON Apvo-
CATE 81. On wear.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
MANHOOD

WTATrnOro money than Rt anything else b.
w Making an agency for the best selling
W HbOok out Beginners succeed grand
ly. None tail. Terms free. HALLETT BOOK
Co, Portland, Maine. dec 20ly
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
. .,ySNN YOPk ~
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The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

How do you know that Caesar had
an Irish sweetheart? lie went to the
Rhine, and proposed to Bridget bridge
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
.l,z...Z..;.sx!.I..l''!.L|...aa.g|.sgSlIs q )

A lecture on the nature, treatment and
radical cure of Seminal Weakness, or Spsr
,natorrhWs. induced by Self Abuse, In
voluntary Emissions. TmPntency, Nervous
Debility, and Imrediments to Marriag'
generally; Consumption, Epilepsy and FIts:
Mental AMI Physical Incapacity, &c BY
ROBERT j. CULVERW ELL, NJ. D.
The world renowned author, in this ad
mirable lecture, clearly proves from his
own experience th8tthe awful consequence
OF Self Abyse may be efltclually removed
without dangerous surgical operations
bouges, instruments. rings or cordial-.
pointing out n mode Of cure at onrn certai,
aud eliectual, by which every sufferer, n
matter what his condition may be, ma,
cure himself cheaply, privately and radr
Ially.
rs This lecture will prove boom t.
thOusa nds and thousands.
Sent under seal, in plain envelope, t.
any address, on receipt of four cents, or tw
postage stamps, Address
The CULYERNELL MEDTCAL CO..
Il Ann ST., New York, Y.
Post Office box, 450. may23 ]
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
JOhnSOn'S CyCIOpaedia.

Revised at a cost Of over 100000. Has 40 Eli.
tors and SO Depts,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

Il is the REST SELLS EASILY and FAST
Men wanted u every county. Address.
a. j. JOHNSON & co.
II Great Jones s.. New YSrk
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

a famous tenor has injured his
voice by having toothpick lodge in his
throat. He probably swallowed the
toothpick in order TO give his voice more
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19

The man who knows himself is n
graduate from the school of experience.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-12-19
READ
ABOUT

Al the wonderful and miraculous cures"
" The unrivalled and peerless medlehes.'
And note the following
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13
MARRIAGES..

WEAvER-WHITE.-Ma May 18th at the
store of o. W. Hammond & Co.. by the Rev.
o. W. Hammond Mr.. Samuel j. Weaver 10
Miss Josephine White daughter of Mr. John
White, deceased.
HAMILTON-MILLER.-O tire 29th of April,
near MiddlebrOOk Augusta county Va nv
Rev. V. w. Wheeler, Mr.. F. G. Hamilton and
Miss Cailie P Miller
Va May 9Th. 1885. by Rev. George L. Wolfe,
Mr.. Eugene Irvine Montgomery to Miss Vir-
ginia McVeigh. daus liter of Mr.. A M. Jordan
vER-ROSENBERGER.-On Thursday Nav
7th, 1885. at the residence of the brides father
Mr. Gideon Rosenberger near Roark Va nv
Rev D. T. Dean, Mr.. Dorilas ]. Driver and
Miss Barbara Rosenberger, all of Rocking
ham.
MIMs-SHENK.-Near Luray, Page county.
April Both, by Rev. L. B Milibourne, Mr..
Henry B Minis and Miss Lizzie Shepk
daughter OF j. H. Shenk, Esq
ER-JUDD.-Aprii 30th, in the
Cler IS office at the Court House in Luray
Page county, by Rev. l. r Milloourne, Mr.
Wm.H Heingardner. of Rockingam co, and
Miss Sydney J. Judd. of Page CO.
ARM.TRUNG-MCGRAY.- the 5th instant by
Rev. Jos. Miller. at Liberty School House
Mr. Geo. 81 mstrong to Miss Elizabeth No
Gray. daughter of Robert McGray, both of
Highland county.
EAGLE-GUMMETT:-Ne Glover Creek, High
land county, on the 9th inst, by the Rev. Jas.
A. Miller. MIR. Jonathan G. Eagle to Miss Mary
A. Gummett, daughter of Henry w. Gum
NETT.
Internationally Rev B. Gale, at the
residence Of the brides father. Mr.. g. W. Ed
April 2Sth. Mr. T. Howard Smithson, of Al
derson. to Miss Jennie Eddie.
MINES KELLY.-At the residence of Mr.. T. W
Christian, near Alone, Thursday. 30th, by
Rev. j. M. Schreckhse, Mr.. Sam'l s. Mines
and Miss Susan Kelly, both of Rockbridge
county,