The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1885-07-24
Bill Nye on Wax.

dropped in the other day to see
New York's great congress of wax
4 figures and statuary carnival. 1t is
onite a success. The first thing YOU
DO is to contribute to the pedestal
fund. New York this spring is mostly
a large rectangular box with a hole in
Il the top, through which the genial pub
4 lie is cordially requested to slide a
b dollar to give the Goddess of Liberty
y a boom.
Il was astonished and appalled, at the
q wealth of apertures in Gotham through
p which / was expected to slide a dime
TO assist some deserving object. Every
little while you run into a free lunch
Il room where there is Il model ship that
= will start up and operate If you feed
If with q nickle. l never visited a
town that offered so many inducements
for early and judicious investments as
New York.
But we were speaking of the wax
works. | did not tarry long to notice
the Presidents of the United States
emba,med in wax, or to listen to the
q Band of lutists who furnished music IN
Il the winter garden. | ascertained
IN where the Chamber of Horrors was
& located, and went there at once. 1t is
a lovely. l have never seen a more sue
u cessful aggregations of horrors uoder
one roof and at n price OF admission.
If you want to be shocked at cost or
have your pores opened for a merely
price, and see a show that
;you will never forget as long as you
live, that is the place to find it. nev-
n invested my money so as to get so
large return for it, because frequent
ly see the whole show yet in the mid
IDLE of the night, and the cold perspira-
tion ripples down my spinal column
just as it did the first time 1 saw it.
The Chamber of Horrors certainly
furnishes a very durable show. L have
known men to pay out thousands of
dollars for a collection of delirium
tremens and new laid horrors no bet
Ger than these that you get on week
days for fifty cents ard on Sundays for
two bits. Certainly New York is the
place where you get your moneys
worth.
There are horrors there in that crypt
that are well worth double the price
of admission. One popularity of the
Chamber of Horrors is that you finally
Z get nervous when anyone touches you,
& and you Immediately suspect he is a
horror who has come out of his crypt
4 to get q breath of fresh air and stretch
1his legs.
That is the reason 1 shuddered a
little when / felt a mans hand IN my
pocket. 1t was so unexpected, and
the surroundings were such that l
must have appeared startled. The
man was a stranger to me, though l
] could see that he was a perfect gentle
man. His clothes were superior to
mine in every way, and he had a GER
tain refinement of which be-
trayed his ill-concealed Knickerbocker
high lineage.
l said, ''Sir, you will find my fine
cut tobacco in the other pocket"
This startled him so that he wheeled
about and wildly dashed into the arms
o$a wax policeman near the door.
When he discovered that he was in the
clutches of a suit of secondhand
clothes filled with a he seemed to
be greatly annoyed and strobe rapid
ly away.
I returned to view a chaste and
truthful scene where n man had
successfully killed another man with
a club. l leaned pensively against a
column with my W spinal column,
wrapped in thought.
Pretty soon a young gentleman from
New Jersey with an Adams apple On
him like a full-grown yam, and accom-
panied by a young lady also from the
|Isqulto jungles of Jersey, touched
|me on the bosom with his umbrella
and began to explain me to his COM
panion.
This" said the Adams apple with
the young man attached to it, sis
Jesse James, the great outlaw chief of
Missouri. How life-like he is. Little
you think, Emeline, that he
would as soo disembowel a bank, kill
the entire board of directors of a rail-
road company and ride off the rolling
stock as yon would wrap yourself
a d%oughnut. How tender and
kind he looks. He not only looks gen.
tie and peaceful, but he looks to me
.sff he wasn't real bright"
l then uttered q piercing shrek and {
the young man from New Jersey went ;
away. Nothing Is so embarrassing to
IN eminent man as to stand quietly {
near and hear people discuss him.
But it is remarkable to see people 4;
get fOOleu at a wax snow. Every DAY
] wax figure is taken for a live man, {
and live people mistaken for wax. l !
book hold of a waxen hand in one cor {
of the winter garden to see if the ring {
was a real diamond, and it flew up and j
look me across the ear in such a life
ike n that my ear is still hot I
there is a roaring in my head that l
very disagreeable indeed {
.eW York Mercuru. {