Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-03-11
BRIGHT BITS.
BEAUTY without brains is a gift to the fair
But beauty with brains is ajewei quite rare.

But beauty with brains is ajewel quite rare.
J. B.
RErUBLICANs have nothing to do now but
watch for the other fellows errors. The deuce
of il is. there Is neither present salary nor
perqs, for the watchmap.-ErchdnGe.
The New York IndeDendent reports 5000
conversions in one week. 1t is not known
whether this includes the government clerks
who have experienced IA change OF heart since
the Democratic regime.-Nelo York W0Ftd.
MAMMA, who tore Mr.. BANDS hair all
out?" said little Mabel. 'Hush, child, You
mustn't speak 0f such things. Papa IS bald,
too. You know" "Ycs; but ! want to know
who tore Mr.. BANDS hair all out. lie isn't
married. ''-Itras SJtinJS.
THE storm centre is now concentrated
around toe head Of the Chief of the Signal
Bureau, Gen. Hazen. y low barometer with
a rising temperature is reported and there is
promise of a very serious military meteoro-
logical disturbance.-ET
INMEnIArELy after Col. Villas had taken the
oath OF Office last Saturday rs Postmaster
General he turned and kissed his Wife. This
was graceful way Of indicating that all the
mails IN the United States could not divert his
devotion from the one female who claims his
allegiance.
THE crowd at Mrs. McElrOy's last reception
was so great that some visitors crawled in
through the windows, and some went down
cellar and came up through private door.
1t is dillicult To see how the Democratic re-
formers can inaugurate any more primitive
simplicity" of manners than this.-Indidn-
dl1OLis Journal tReD.)
STRANGER Ito Chicago CITIZEN 81 hear that
one of your prominent divines has said that
Chicago IS a religious city, containing a
breadth and sweetness OF the Christian faith
not common upon earth Chicago citizen
dndgnantly)-"Y0 shouldn't believe all you
hear about Chicago. That minister must be
a crank."-Ne,C York Times.
A PUBLIC SCHOOL TEACHER asked her class
TO define oscillation.
First pupil (giTl)-T0 have extremes meet.
Second pupil (bOy)- To kiss.
Third pupil lbig b0yl-To form into squares.
Fourth pupil (girll-TO love very much.
Fifth pupil dig glrl)-Why, to swing your
partner.
Teacher-Wc will try another lesson.
SWEET LOVE, What means these tears
Upon thy page? Do case my fears!
Hath word, or deed or look Of mine
Caused sorrow in a heart like thine?
Oh, pity pray nv anxious state
And answer ere it be too late! CLYDE.
DEAR CLYDE, just now your note received
And am astonished much, and grieved
That you should once have thought, believed
Those blOtches ON my letter-page meant tears
Pray, put aside your anxious fears
For all that nonsense I've no use.
Those marks meant merely-ofange juice!
CALLIE.
-NOFFiStOa0H HerdId.
"LET's SEE" unused b. f. Butler, turning
to his private secretary. what business was
/ engaged in last fallI"
Last fall?" said the Secretary, reflectively.
so! why, you were running for President"
president? President of what?"
"Why, President OF the United States.'
so, pshaw get out You're dreaming"
Then the private secretary procured an old
copy Of the New York Sun and called Buffers
attention to several editorials.
"Well, blame my hide" exclaimed the
General; you are correct; but the incident
had entirely slipped my memory. was Ia
boring under the impression that | was on
Yachting excursion to the Sandwich Islands
last fall p N0rriStO9Cn HerdId