The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1885-10-16
ATALE ORA PARROT.
A Bird That Brought the Blush to n Clerks
Ole al.

A Bird That Brought the Blush to n Clerk
Cheek.
Htw Orleanl Chronicle.
Johnny 0'Hearne-he's the little fel
low with the 7x9 countenance that has
charge OF the property-room at the Cen
trail station-has been getting into snoth
or pickle. Somebody was heartlesl
enough to remark that he was quite fresh
and getting picked nov and then wouldn't
hurt him, but that was spiri. Of Jealousy
that ranked in the persons breast, per
haps because he wasn't as pretty as John
and 1t was Just through meanness that the
same party remarked that Johnny had
either been sawed OF aud hammered down
or wSs picked before he was ripe.
But that is neither here nor there, he's
a good, clever fellow and can take care oil
more iunk than any two men in the town.
dc has q place for everything, but the
only trouble ia he never puts it there, and
the motto, "a place for everything, and
everything out Of place" stares visitor in
the face the very moment he enters the
Sanctum 0 Hearne.
To the uuinstructed it is well to say
that it is 0'Hearne's business to take
charge Of all property, stolen, found OF
taken from prisoners which falls into the
hands of the police. BE has gotten along
all right with these goods until Friday
last when the detectives captured a very
fine parrot which had been stolen from a
lady in the city, and this, like all other
property recovered, they turned over to
Mr. 6rHearne until It's ownership should
be determined.
The trial came up on Saturday, and
O'Hearne and the other parrot were in
Court. Judge Davey said he didn't think
he could uy the case that day, whereupon
the little property CLERK jumped to his
feOt and said;
"Say, Judge, Just a minute; Id ask your
Honor il the milk Of human kindness
which circulstes In your manly bosom has
not at all curdled and been churned into
oleomargarine to have that bird removed
from the station"
USend for the Black Maria" sung ont
the parrot, which, by the way, was most
fluent talker.
NThere he goes, Judge. That's him.
He's talker, and don't you forget 1t. He
talks from his bill to his tail feathers, and
It amt no nse TO tell him TO shut up. He
understands everything but that, and II
would take that pile-driver on Canal street
to make him tumble: Why, Judge, l was
talking TO friend OF mine this morning, a
lady. by the way, and 1 had Just told heI
how hard had to work, W hen this beastly
bird cried out: '0h, you give me pain in
NV suspenders.' How's that Tor bird
Jndge. and I'll bet two to one he never
wore suspenders in his life; why, he ain't
even got pants on. And then can't even
come into tho room but what he shoots II
10 me with 'Ah, there Stay there, OIL
something like that" i.
At this uncture the bird, who had evi
IDENTIFY beeen associating with some OF the
base ball fraternity, cooked his head or
one side and said:
"That will do; three strikes and out"
"Order in court p shouted Judge Davey
snd Court Officer Shea quietly walked VI
and told the bird il he didn't cheese the
racket he'd lock himup. Heyelledit pretty
loud and the parrot replied, Zone bRWl,
yhereupon Shea seized the bird and
threw him toward the window, but tht
bird recovered, and alighting back on hi
perch said, "Fowl, not out.
judge said O'HeArne, who by Thu
time had CollRred the floor again, tina
bird knows me, and he knows that car
organize a nine that will knock the etuttin
out OF the Dudenheier's or any other man
and his remarks are personal.
THAT will do, Mr.. HeArne," remarks thl
Judge. 1.-THE case 10 continued unit
Monday. In the meantime you will az