The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-05-09
DOWN FINE.
Old Ike Discusses Matters in a Meta
 physical Manner.

HSIo, OnCLe ikG, SAiu prominent citizen, addressing the old African, who, with lath for a walking cane, was hob bling along the street.
 Howdy do, sah howdy do p
 "Very we'll, thank you; how are you getting alonga"
 "Pory, sab poly. Sorter crippled up in my j'ints. Desc heah chilly nights sorter puts CT wire aige on de atmusfere, sah. De ar an de sunshine aim like da wuz when I wuz CT younger pusson, sah. Dat ain all de changes whut hab been made. Tuther day eat some black berry jam an it gin me de cramps, dou- bled me all up, sah. But 'twan't dat way when l wuz youngster. Wy, den, l uster cline up one O desc wild mul- berry trees an eat till I'd drap on de groun' like CT terbarker worm. Vas, sah, times is wful much changed"
 "Uncle Ike, you know we are going to have city election pretty soon. There are now two candidates, MT. Kramer and MT. Martin, both of them democrats, which one is your choice2
 "Lemme tell yer, cap'n, bout 'em bein' dimocrats doan make no differ. ence ter me. What wanter know is dis: Whut da gwine ter do fur de peo- pie? Da tells me dat Martin is wuth CT great deal O money, and Kramer ain't CT po' man."
 Both gentlemen are in good condi- tion, financially"
 "Dat's whut heah. Kline hearted gennermen, too, ain't da ?"
 "Oh, yes"
 "Uh huhl Wall, femme ax yer 'Spozen wuster go to desc men an say dat wuz monstrus fon' O middlin' meat but dat didn't hab none, but dat wanted side O 50. Which one would be de fust ter 'commerdate me?'
 "I don't know about that, Uncle Ike. You must remember, however, that the one which might give it to you the more readily might not make the best mayor"
 He would make de bes' mayor fur me, sah, an de man whut'll make de bes' mayor fur me is de man whut it stan's me in ham ter vote fur"
 "You ought to vote for the man who will make the best mayor for the entire city"
 "Whut do de ontire city kere fur me, cap'n9 l might die ter night, but would de oniire city go ter my fun'ul ter nor 2 Would de whole to~n come up an fling flowers on my grabe2 No, sah. Dad cart me ous heah ter de ole fel whar da burys strangers, an put me in de groun'. I'se been hbin' here fur many years, but whut do de town kere2 Nor, sah, de town doan kere daim."
 "You should not look at it that way, old man. Aye you democrat ?"
 "Whut want ter be CT demmercrat fur ?"
 Well, are you a republican
 @Whut want ter be CT republican fur ?"
 "I don't know"
 "Neider dees l, sah. Now wants ter tell yer CT little piece O news. I'se gwine ter vote fur de man whut will hep me de mos'."
 "You arc not going to sell your vote, are you?"
 "Whut mus do, fling it erwayr
 "Well, by selling it you lose the respect cf the white people"
 "I does, eh3 Wall now, whar's de white man whut doan blebe dat de ole time nigger won't steal? Yer kain't an- swer, sah, fur he aim heah. Dar aim CT white man in dis heah town whut blebes dat Lis CT homes ez de mos onery loolin' white pusson. Elf votes hones', da thinks d.. ! =uz bought, am ef sells my vote am da finds it out da ain't 'sprized CT tall. Whut's de use'n in me tamperin' eriaung wid de white mans idee . hon. estness? Boss, ain' got no -four in my house. wants some an' wants it monstrous bad. De white pusson wants my vote. Now, de question is, will he gin me flour fur dat vote. Ef %, all right"
 Ike, you believe in the bible, don't you7"
 "Oh, yas. sah, an I knows dat de bad 'oman vhut hepped de soldiers climb ober de val wux fixed rp all night while !