The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1885-09-18
His Free Tickets.

One Of the most laughable things.
illustrating tho result of working
places of amusement for free tickets,
is told by New York paper. There
are people all over the country who
will work harder to get free ticket
to place of amusement than they
would to assure themselves an en-
trance into the golden streets of the
New Jerusalem. The same people
will spend ten dollars making them.
selves solid with the ticket agent of q
circus, to got complimentary for the
show. There seems to these people to
be certain tone about being on the
free list that does not exist in connec-
tion with ticket bought at the box
office. 1t is the same way with rail-
road passes. The person who gets
his first pass feels that he is distin.
guished guest of the campany. He
feels as though the conductor looks at
him earnestly when he hands the pass
up, to see who the distinguished par
ty Is, and he tries to look unconcerned,
as though he owned the road, whllo
the conductor may be wondering how
the man succeeded in getting the pass,
or possibly ho is sspeculating on the
possibility of his having stolen it, or
bought 1t OF scalpcr. There is some-
thing facinating about going to show
for nothing, and the New York paper
tells how it worked on q German sa-
loom keeper, who had saloon near
the theater. The saloon-kceper used
to smile at tho actors and managers,
and they got to know him pretty we'll,
and one day q bill poster gave the
sallon-kecper five tickets to the gal
lery. 1t was q day when there was
no crowd expected, and tho manager
''papered the house, as the saying is,
giving tickets to whoever would take
them. The German closed his saloon
and took his whole family. He was
probably tho happiest man in New
York. The usher called him by name,
when showing the family to seat,
and that pleased him. The manager,
between the acts, went up to him and
asked him what he thought of tho
play, and he felt as though it was tho
biggest day of his life. Tho actors on
the stage looked ut him and winked,
and one of them held up two fingers,
silly, as though ordering two beers,
and the saloon. keeper laughed right
out loud, and called tho attention OF
his wife to his familiarity with all
connected with tho thcatcr. After
the performance. everybody he met,
connected with the theatre, spoke
pleasantly to him, and he told them to
all come around to his place, anytime.
and everything would be free. He
was captured. In less than half an
hour five ushcrs came into the saloon,
and he set up the beer, and talked
ubout tho play. The ushers sat down
to lunch, and twelve actors came in,
and when he asked them what they
would have, the most of them took
mixed drinks and cigars. Tho saloon
keeper began to feel as though it was
Il little too much of u good thing, but
he took his medicine like man. The
box.ofiice man dropped in, with four
or five friends, and asked tho saloon
keeper why he didn't come around
oftener. and he set up The drinks for
them. The manager came i'll directly,
with four actresses, and went into Il
private room in the saloon. and when
the saloOn-kecpcr asked them what
they would have, one of the girls, said
81 saw you in the front row, and YOU
winked ut me. will take some cham-
pagne." The res: said they would
take the same, and the saloon Keeper
nearly tainted before he got out of the
room. but he kept his head and opened
the wine. The proprietor of the the
ater came in after little, and when
asked what he would have, he said he
would take cigar, and when tho poor
victim got out the box, the proprietor
took the whole box and carried 1t to
the thcater for the boys to smoke who
could not get away. Finally all the
customers took their departure, thank
ing the saloon keeper for his Kindness.
and he sat down ON n beer-keg and
figured up. For six shillings worth of
free tickets he had set up enough wet
goods to amount to seventeen n dollars.
and he was mad. just then the bill
poster. who had given him the tickets,
came in. when the German grabbed a
bung-starter and knocked him down,
and walked on him with wooden shoes.
and mauled him until he begged for
mercy. AS the bIll-poster was crawl
ing out the door the saloon keeper
said. ''Hold OH. Stop Il lcetlc. Prom
isc mo dat you nefer gife me no moro
vree dicket." The bill-poster prom
iscd, and he got out alive. The sa.
oon.kcepcr is not patronizing tho
legitimate drama any more.-Peck's
Sun.