The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1885-01-15

land sh0uld advocate and take part IN
them. The finest women do not approve
them and are not so married. Their del.
icacy revolts at such pomp, and shripks
from such violation of the plainest pro.
prieties. at every wedding of this kind,
the presents are displayed and labeled !,
and their quality and cost published in
the newspapers, along with the full toilet
of the bride; not he- gowns alone, but
even her underwear, her stockings, every
shred of her esoteric wardrobe. Is this
nice is this womanly; is this decent?
Every properly organized person
knows that it is not. Such things
would be incredible if they were
not 80 continually done, and done, too
which is still more incredible those
pluming themselves on their ladyhood.
Ladyhood in sooth 1t is evident that
in the social world there are ladies and
ladies'; that what some of them habitu-
ally do without the slightest hesitation
others could not think of doing without
a fiery blush.
Formerly, when brides entire ward-
robe with every connubial detail had
been advertised in the newspapers, it was
assumed that the prying irrepressible re.
porters, on whose shoulders so many sins,
not their own, are usually laid, had sur.
reptitiously obtained the particulars.
This assumption is no longer made.
The mother, sister or other near kins.
woman of the bride meets the reporters
eagerly, and furnishes them with COM
plete informa alton of the most indelicate
sort, on the ground that, in matters so
momentous, entire accuracy is absolutely
necessary. The transparent fact is that
the bride, as well as those related to her,
are resolved to have her bridal, and
everything connected With it, blazoned
before the public, irrespective of propri.
ETY.. She and they might claim that the
marriages o: titled and prominent per-
SONS in the Old World mcnarchies are
copiously chronicled, and that the ma.
jority of newspaper readers enjoy such
gossip. This is true enough; but the
Old World nlonarchies are not examples
for a Republic and q pure Democracy,
and no sensitive man or woman would be
willing to crafty vulgar curiosity unless
petty self.loye were sorely involved.
The unsafety of spectacular wedding
is shown by the fact that large proper
tion of marriages prove disappointments,
often bitter, very bitter, disappointments.
It has been asserted that more than one.
half of them turn out badly, and that at
least two.thirds of them would better
never have occurred. This may or may
not be correct. There are, unfortunate
ly, no statistics on this important subject.
But enough is known to clearly denote
certain hazard in every matrimonial ven.
ture; and in many such ventures a posi-
tive peril. 1t may he conceded that
they who possess sufficient means to war.
rant them, financially, in pompous
wedding-many do not scruple to secure
one by credit-would have less prospect
of serious dishsrmony than those of
slender income. It is easy to see that
rich couple are not nearly so depend
ent on one another as poor couple;
that their friction is necessarily less;
that their chances of contentment, or
silent resignation, are increased. Power.
ty is always fearful strain, especiallyin
marriage, and it is hard to hide the
strain. Many rich husbands and wives
who now live in apparent accord, and are
REALIZED happy, from ignorance Of their
mutual feelings and attitude, would have
Jared apart long ago, had their circum.
stances been atraitened.
II women insist, as they seem to, on
some grand demonstration or parade in
regard to marriage, let them defer it un.
til number of its anniversaries have
passed-fve at least, tho ten would be
better. While couples often adjust
themselves to one another in a year or
two, it is unwise to believe all peril over
until they have had longer experience
together. Not intrequently pairs sepa-
rate after fifteen or twenty years of wed.
ded bliss; but commonly they find out
much earlier, their irreconciliable incom.
patibility. Few have the patience or the
fortitude to bear with one another's
failings to such an extent. But the
period of trial should not be less than
ten years, to insure prudence. If they
have so far borne and forborne, sinned
and suffered, forgiven and been forgiven
ALL marriage is series of adaptations
and compron ises-let them celebrate
their tin wedding with such pomp and
parade as they may! Then they will, in
all probability, have passed the danger
point, and they will have cause to rejoice
that they have escaped rocks on which
so many conjugal ventures have been
wrecked. But all discretion forbids the
cry of victory ere the first blow has been
struck.
JuNIUs HRSRI BROWNE.