The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1885-02-21
a Truthful Trio.


the road, will help Dallas to build ii.
MEDIcUs.
A Truthful Trio
Mark Twain and Petroleum V. Nasby
says Dom "latt dined with Eli Per-
kins at the latter's residence in New
York. The cor 'ersation at that din ner
snail never forget. The stories told
anu Inc "reminiscences brought out at
that dinner would fill small book.
After the last course, and after the la
dies had withdrawn, the conversation
turned upon horses. Finally Mr..
Twain laid down his cigar and asked
Perkins and Nasty if they had ever
heard Of a fast horse he Mark used to
own in Nevada.
"Lthink not" said Nansby.
well, gentlemen" continued Mr..
Twain, as he blew smoke ring and
watched 1t, "that was a fast horsa. He
was very fast horse. But he was so
tough bitted that l couldn't guide him
with bit at all"
"How did you guide him?" asked Ell.
well, gentlemen, | had TO guide him
with electricity. [ had to have wire
lines and had to keep battery in the
wagon all the time in order to stop
him"
"Why didn't you stop him by holler-
Ing who-a" asked Eli
"Stop him by hollering who-a!" ex-
GAINED Mr.. Twain. "Why | could not
hollar loud enough to make that horse
hear me. He travelled SO fast that no
sound ever reached him from behind.
He went faster than the sound, sir. Hol-
Ter whoa and he'd be in the next town
before the sound of your voice could
reach the dashboard. Travel fast?' |
should say he could. Why | once
started from Virginia City for Meadow
creek right in front of one of the most
dreadful rain-storms we ever had on
the Pacific coast. Wind and rain? WHY
the wind blew 50 miles an hour and the
rain fell in sheets. drove right before
that storm Tor three hours-just on the
edge OF that hurricane and rain for 40
miles,"
didn't you get drenched?"
Drenched? No, sir. Why, tell you,
| drove right in front of that rain storm.
L could lean forward and let the sun
shine on me, or lean backward and feel
rain and catch hail-stones. When the
hurricane Stacked up the herse Stacked
up too, and when it blew faster | just
said 'g-lkp to the horse and touched
Wv p"tbNig WV W. Nbnls NOW Il
don't want TO lie about my horse, Nj.
Perkins, and don't ask you TO believe
what / say, but tell you truthfully
that when got to Meadow creek my
linen buster was dry as powder. Not a
drop OF rain on the wagon seat either
while the wagon box was level full ui
hail-stones and water, or Pm -
a.
"Look here gentlemen" interrupted
Mr.. Nasoy, "speaking of the truth, did
you ever hear about my striking that
man in Toledo?"
Mark said he had never heard about
it.
"Well, sir, 1t was this way: There
was man there-One OF those worldly
skeptical fellows, VINO questioned my
veraciCy one day, He said he had
doubts about the truthfulness of one o
my crossroads incidents. He didn'I
say it publicly, but privately. I'm
sorry for the sake of his wife aud fam
lily now that he SAID it 1T all--and Sol ~
Tor tne man, too, buuause he WASH
prepared TO go. ii he'd been a Christian
IT would have been different. / SAY
l didn't want to strike this man, be-.
cause it's bad habit to get into-this
making human chaos out of fellow
man. But he questioned my veracty
and the earthquake came. | struck hin
once-just once. l remember he wa,
putting down n carpet at the time ana
had his mouth full OF carpet tacks. Bul
man can't stop to discount carpet
tacks in mans mouth when he ques
lions your veracity, can he. l meyer do
| simply struck the blow"
did 1t hurt the man muchW asked
Eli.
AT Jon't ths,,l- Il di1 I, 49,. 49,. -
den. The bystanders said If | was 20.
ing to strike a second blow they wanted
to move out of the state. Nov, | don'l
want you To believe me, and | DOM
expect you will, but to tell tho honest
truth, Mr.. Perkins, l squashed thai
man right down into dUOr-mat, and
his own wife, who was lacking down
one edge OF the carpet ateho time, came
came right along and took him for
gutta peTcha rug, and actually tackled
| him down in front of the door. Poor
woman, she never knew she was tack
| ing down he. own husband! What be
came of the tacks In his mouth? yor
ask. Well, the next day, the boy,
pulled them out of the bottoms of hi,
Overshoes, and"
"Gentlemen!" interrupted Eli, al
does me GOOD To hear such truths. be
lieve every word you say, aud fee
that / ought to exchange truths will
you. Now, did you ever hear how
went to praying-meeting at New Lon
don, Connecticut, in Il rain-stormw
They said they had not.
"Well, gentlemen" said Eli, "one daN
day l started for the New LOndol
prayer-meeting on horseback. Wnon
got about halfway there, there came W
u fearful storm. The wind blew hur,
ricano, the rain fell i'm torrents, tn,
lightning cleaned through the sky, ant
| went aud crouched down behind
large barn. But pretty soon the light
ming struck the barn, knocked IL int,
1000 splinters, anu sent my horse whirl
ing over into n neighburiug cOrn-patch.
"Did 1t kill you, Mr.. Perkins?" asked
MIR. Twain, the tears rolling down his
cheeks.
"No, it didn't kill mo, l said, "but
was good deal discouraged"
"Well what did you do, Mr., Perkins,?
"What did do2 Well, gentlemen, q
tell the honest Conneclicuttruth, wen
right out into the pasture, took off m.
coat, bumped up my bare back, anl
took eleven clips of lightning right OF
my bare back bone, drew the eleotricit,
all out of the sky, aud then got on /
my horse and rode into New London Il
time to lead at the evening prayer-meeI
ing"
Arise and siugl
We call special attention to Hughe
Bros. advertisement TO be found In on
columns who, being overstocked wit
champagne wine In manufacturing thei
Grape Baking Powder, are proposing {
almost give " away
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