Morning journal and courier., 1885-08-21
CURVES.

Bu1wer Lytton says: f1n life, as in art, the
 beautiful moves in curves" That's why the
 girls are all mashed on our pitcher.-Ipwell
 Citizen.
 forr' The editor evidently takes his lemon
 ade only from the church dipper.-Philadel=
 phia Call.
 An exchange has the headline "Whers does
 Lying BeginW Just about where q woman
 passes her twentieth birthday ay.-Binghamt
 Republican.
 "G6ed graeieHsr' said ths hen when she
 discovered the porcelain egg iii her nest; "I
 shall be bfigAlayef heEt."=B6st6h Cem=
 msfeial Bulletin,
 A cock ia Brooklyn died the ether day worth $566, 600, and the papers say she left no heirs. Have they locked in the bHtteff- Burlington Free Press, IA baby's arms eheirele the wefid," says the preyerb man of the Merchant Traveller, We have noticed that baby usually gets the earth when it's grandmother is afeund.- Semeryills Journal. The Emperor of Japan can traes his an cestry back to an unbroken line for 2,500 years. Every once in while something
 happens to humble the pride of Boston man.-New York Graphic. "Now, then," said busy lawyer to one of number of waiting clients, "you are next, sir" sIm whatN Next" ''No you don't" said the client, moving toward the door. ''I didn't come here to get shaved."- New York Times.
 Teacher-Now, Johnny, if I take 10 cents from 10 cents, how much remains2 Stupid boy-I dunno. Teacher-Well, suppose you had dime in your pocket and lost it. what would be in your pocket? Stupid boy
 Blamed if don't think thered be hole.- The Rambler.
 Judge (to darky witness)-"Do you know
 the nature of an oath?" Witness-"Sah"
 Judge-'Do you understand what you are to
 swear tog" Witness-"Yes, sah, I'm to swar
 to tell de truf." Judge-"And what will happen if you do not tell ita' Witness-"l 'spects our side i'll win de case, sah."-New York Sun.
 There were only few hundred Christians
 in the Chinese massacre the other day, in stead of ten thousand. We thought at the time there must be some mistake We dldnt t
 believe it was possible that there could be so
 many as ten thousand Christians, even in
 China, where it is fashionable to affect pa-
 ganism.-Boston Transcript. "Come here to me, you good for nothing" :" exclaimed pious farmer, addressing his son. "You ought to be ashamed of yourself going fishing on Sunday" q didn't go fish in, pap; only went down the lane to throw sticks at them nigger boys" "Oh, well, that's all right, then. Recollect, my son, you must never violate the SabDath. ."-AfkansaS Traveller.
 'sDoes your husband go to the lodge, Mrs. Gibberickg' "Well, he just don't I broke up that little game while ago" s'Why, how in the world did you do its' ''When- ever he started for the lodge went with hip az far as the skating rink, and told him to call for me on his way home. It only took few doses to cure him. .'-Chicago Ledger.
 At menagerie-Some spectators chatting with the wife of the lion tanner: IS 1t true, madam, that lion costs 5000 francs?"
 s'That depends; there are lions and lions"
 "But your lions; for instance, Brutuss" 'sBrutus would not sell for 10, 900 francs. He deyoured my first husband. Paris | Morning News.
 sT say, conductor" remarked passenger. as he boarded train on a narrow gauge rail road in the oil country, (which is the shady side of this carp "There hain't no shady side" replied the conductor, who was borr I in that region, and knows how to speak the language. 'tNo shady .sides" 'sNo, sir Thar's so many curves and twists on this road, and the train runs so fast that the SUI 1 shines on both sides at the same time. '- l New York Sun.