Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-01-23
COPIED COMMENTS.
NOT 4 LAWYER IN ONE RESPECT


A gentleman from the rural pre-
cincts was before the magistrates
court few days ago, aud being of
legal turn of mind conducted his own
case. lie displayed considerable
shrewduess in examining witnesses,
showing some Of the characteristics
of a born lawyer. AT speech making
time he wanted the prosecuting attor-
ney to speak first. This the p. a. re-
fused to do. After some parleying,
the defendant concluded to take the
lead, and stepping up beiora the mag
istrhte said, "Swear me, Judge, /
want to tell the trulh." This remark
convinced all present that he wasn't
intended for lawyer.-Maysville
GOING ONE EYE ONLY.
The following bill has peen intro
duced IN the Arkansaw legislature:
"a bill for an act entitled an act to
protect certain people. "Be it enac-
ted that from and after the passage
of this act, all one,eytd people sliull
be admitted into shows at half price"
One gentleman from llamiat county
offered an amendment TO the effect
that blind people should be admitted
free, but objection being raised, tie
proposed amendment was lost, OH
the ground that blind people should
stay at home.-Ark. Traveller.
THE NEW LEAF. r
Jan. l.-Sworc off.
2.-Caught cold. 'F
t Bad cough. ~
l. ti,j Was told
Rock and rye
ID knock ii high
''Er'n kite.
Friend and L M
Sat all night
Good and tight. =
lap 4.-Paintad town
Rosy red,
5.-Broken down,
| rIU Large head, +
Aching sore; j,
,>ss - . Don't think ~ VI
Ever drink
Amy more,
HIS swEETHEAR1'S RRoTnER-IN-LAw.
The President yesterday nomina-
ted Assistant Secretary of State John
Davis to be Judge of the Court of
Claims, Mr.. Davis is the husband
of u daughter of Secretary Frelng-
huysen, and great many persons
have expected that the President
would take care of him in an official
sort of way.-Louisvile Times.
WORSE THAN MORGAN.
Judge j. X. Huey, of Livington
county, is candidate fof United
States Marshal of Kentucky. He
was a Captain In the Confederate
service, and the soldiers used to tell
the story that on one occasion he cap
tured a number of Federals. Morgan
was just then gaining name, and
frightened prisoner asked the
Captain If he were John Morg an!
"No, SIR. roared he, ] am j. X. Huey,
sir; ten times worse than Morgan
ten times worse, sir" This had the
expected result, and the poor fellows,
having been properly humbled,
marched meekly to the rear. Capt.
Huey was good soldier and Is gem
tleman. He is now County Judge
Of Livington county.-Louisville
Times.
r. s. v. p.
One of the princes of good cheer IN
Norwich, who is not perfectly famil-
lar with all the abbreviations and ini-
iials used by the altogether too-too,
received from friend an invitation
to a reception in the corner of which
were the letters II. S. V. p. "H-e-m"
said he to himself, as he immedia-
lively repeated the initials: "R-S-
W. know what O. o. ID. means,
but I'll he blamed ifI know what r.
is. v. p. means" "Why," said a
friend, who observed his perplexity,
"that means Rum Served Very Plen-
tifnlly." an co." said the other
decidedly.-Norwich Bulletin.
SEQUEL TO A SONG.
Rev. Fl. ID. Webster, who once
wooed, but did not win Miss Ella
nloxom, Of Zanesville, Ohio, and