Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1885-04-23

illustration of mistaken indehtity; but |
If we can rely upon newspaper re-
ports, such ludicrous incidents are
surpassed by what is said to have
happened in the neighborhood of
Morecambe. Some time ago the body
of what was supposed by the discover
er to be human b eng was found
lying on The beach near the place
above named, having undoubtedly
been left there by the receding tide.
The usual preparations for holding
an orthodox inquest were put in force,
and kept gong until the examination
of medical man proved the suspect
ed human corpse 10 be but the carcass
of a monkey, which had probably
been thrown overheard from some
ship, and which so closely resembled
in appearance q human beng as to
require doctor TO tell the difference.
Such a mistake looks either like a
gross hattery upon a dead monkey or
an unconscious satire upon human
nature, calculated to delight all be-
levers in the DarWinian theory.
An amusing hlunder was once made
by dyer, who was given by farm er
four flannel shirts to be dyed a fast
grey color, instead of which be dyed
them blue. On wearing the garments,
the color came out of them, SO that,
as the farmer curiously expressed it,
Che looked like Red Indian" and it
cost him several shillings in baths to
turn himself into a white man again,
he sued the dyer and obtained dam
ages.
A ludicrous mistake is reported to
have occurred at the opening of a
bazaar IN Glasgow, at which the
Prince Louise and Marquis of Lorne
were present. A distinguished clergy
man was called upon by the chair
man to conduct devotional exercises;
and the reverend gentleman had
commenced to read, when four pipers
of a Highland regiment, owing to
some misunderstanding, struck up
with q wild shriek on the bagpipes,
by way Of a preliminary to ''The
Campbells are coming" The music
was promptly stopped, but the sci
emnity of the proceedings had of
course been shaken.
An embarrassing incident, we are
told, once happened to an EnglishmaR
in Rome. Entering one of the
churches in that city as service was
going on, he satquietly dowR, placing
his hat on the ground beside him.
Some little tiae passed, and as there
seemed no immediate prospect of the
ceremony coming to an end, he reach
I'd for his hat in order to leave, but
was stopped by an unseen hand,
which grasped him from behind.
Thinking some custodian of the
church wished him to remain till the
end of the service, he again waited
but his patience becoming exhausted,
be again reached for his hat, and again
he was prevented from going in the
same manner. Convinced that the
service was some really important one,
the Englishman once more delayed
MS departure; but at the expiration Of
a quarter of an hour, he determined
to go IN spite Of etiquette, SO he re-
peated the same GanCeuvre IN the oil
rection of his head-covering. a third
time the same hand detained him, but
as he deter minedly resisted its grasp,
voice behind him exclaimed in plain
English: 81 beg your pardon, but
that is my hat you are taking" Such
was the fact. He had been detained
all this while because each time he had
reached in mistake for the hat Of an
other stranger placed IN close proxim-
lty to his own.
A mistake Of ala embarrassing ma
ture made by gentleman III London
illustrates the necessity of keeping
careful record of ones engagements.
On the occurrence of grand day"
at the Middle Temple, the Masters of
the bench were uneasy at the nOn-ap'
pearance of one of the guests, a learn
ed ex-iudge.
All had arrived but him, and the
repast was ready to be served. The
missing guest failed to appear, but
next day it was ascertained' that the
learned gentleman lad walked into
the hall Of the IaRer Temple, and had
dined with the benchers of that learn
ed society, who had not invited him,
and therefore had not made any prep
aration to receive him. It did not
happen to be grand day" at the In
ner Temple. and the unexpected guest
never discovered his mistake until he
happened to innocently observe to the
treasurer:
81 thought this was your grand
day?"
The learned gentleman in question
had originally been a student of the
Inner Temple, which accounts in
some measure for the mistake.
A much more awkward incident is
related as having happened to a lady
In Paris. The society Of a popular
but blind count was much sought after
on account Of his wit and musical att
tainments. He disappeared from the
town for some time, and on his return
called on q fashionable marchioness,
who was preparing to go to fancy
ball. She begged 10 be excused; but
as he had an important message TO
deliver he was show IN, and being Of
course blind, he was asked to take a
chair in her boudoir. Whilst the
worthy count was delivering his mes
sage, the marchioness, assisted by her
maid, calmly proceeded with her
toilet. Being ready to descend to her