Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1885-06-04
ON THE STAGE.
Some Funny Stories That a Manager
Tells About Himself and Other PeO-
pie.
Brooklyn Eagle

''Fun!' exclaimed Manager McCon-
nell, In his pigeon>hole office at Brook
lyn theater the other night. eff you
want fun you want to travel with
show. Perhaps you didn't know that
was an actor-r-r myself once. 0
yes, was. John Mccullough and I
used to act together. And I told you
about shaking hands with John IN
'Virginius, and dropped boiled egg
into his palm that he had to stand and
hold for about ten minutes, as he
hadn't any pockets IL his toga. He
would have eaten me if hadn't escaped
to the paint~frame.
Talking about paint~frames, did [
ever tell you that story they relate of
John Stetson? No2 Well, when John
was in Boston he had a scene painter
named Webster One day at rehear-
sal some of the actors got into dis
pute over the pronunciation Of word,
and proceedings were suspended while
one Of the number went TO Webster's
dictionary TO ascertain the true pro-
nunciation. Stetson happened to be
ia at that moment, and burst out with,
Here, here; get to work. What are
YOU idling about IN this way for|
One Of the actors said they were in
doubt about a word, but they had just
settled it, as Webster said so and so.
Stetson bounded on the stage" and
shouted: 'D--n you, Webster, get
back'.on your paint-frame. If you ever
interfere in a rehearsal IN this theatre
again I'll discharge you.
''You remember the scene in 'Vir~
ginius' where the troops push back
the people from the Forum. When
we played that In Pittsburg we hired
lot of men from the rolling.mil to
play the populace. The captain of
the supers was one of our own men,
and he commanded the troops. Some
of us resolved on q little fun. so l
limited to the populace that this cap
tain was q terrlbie fellow; that he
got excited when he was playing,
and that he usually hurt somebody
when he was thrashing around with
his sword. When the Forum scene
was on [ hunted for cover, and await
ed developments. The populace was
in hand, made up of men with muse
les like John L. Sul1ivan's. and arm
ed with rubber clubs. The troops
waltzed in, IeveIed their spears at the
people, and the captain menaced them
with his sword That was the cue for
the populace to get out, but it would
MT go Mccullough was wild, and
the prompter was that excited that he
almost yelled Everybody whispered
come off, Clear the stage!' but the
Roman popuiace stood as if they had
been glued Finally the captain Of
the subers pranced in among them
and began to lay the flat Of his sword
over their shins, at the same time tell
ing them in an undertone to back
away. That was what they were
waiting for. They took that poor
chap by the arms and legs and gave
bim a toss that sent him nearly up to
the flies. They played battledOre and
shuttlecock with him until, | assure
you, there was nothing on him but
half a pair of tights. He had to be
hauled away for repairs, and I was
discharged, as usual. l was discharg-
ed regularly every Saturday night
but I always went to work on Mon
day. I wasn't going to be left away
out IN the woods at time when the
walking was poor.
s'Animals? Yes, I've had enough
of animals on the stage We had a
cock-fght here one night IN barn
yard scene. The last time that The
Romany Rye was here the dog Lion
should have kept beside the actress
who played Gertie, and when she
said You would kiss me, wouldn't
you Lion2' he should have put his
head in her lap and licked her hand.
What does that dog do but walk away
and smell at an old radish that he
had found there.
1--WE were playing IN a Georgia
town one night-that was when Law
renee Barrett and [ were starring toN
gether. Lawrence was playing Ham
let and | was doing the skull, or
some other part like that. [ was
property~man at that time, and I ran
sacked that Georgia town for pick
ak to be used by the grave-disger,
and couldn't find one. There was
nothing else to do but to make one
had a strong jack~knife, so I whit
tied pick-ax out of two pieces of soft
pine and pasted tin~foll over the blade
Of it. 1t looked like pick>ax, but it
weighed only about a pound, and
s., who was playing the grave
digger that night, gave away the
whole thing. When the curtain went
up s. was IN the grave splitting on
his hands. He took the pick by the
end of the handle and let the blade
drop on the bottom of the grave It
was SO light it bounced about three
feet. The people In front shouted.
Then he picked the thing up between
his thumb and finger and worked that
way, letting it bounce at every stroke.
1t looked about as if ne was pecking at
the bottom with piece of straw.
Then he leaned against the edge of
the grave and picked his teeth with it
and scratched his ear With The point,
all the time holding it between his
thumb and one finger, mind you,
and singing away as sober as you
please. He and were both discharg-
ed that night.
s'Next night Barrett and I gave
EHoY,1 LET, IN a hall over q hutehnrS g