The Opelousas courier., 1885-08-29
CHEATING HI MINISTER.
How City Clergymen Some
times Fare at Weddings.
Some Bridegrooms Who Get Out of Pay
ing the Minister His Fee.

age fees form no mean part of
minister's income. We receive all thu
way from S. to 800 per marriag'
generally, although in many instances
we are beaten clean out of the fee
In the first place. there's the envelope
I dodge. One night a happy, loving
couple awoke me in the middle of the
night and wanted me to marry them
/ arose, dressed myself and performed
the ceremony. AS the parties turned
to leave the groom hunted through
his coat-tail pocket, and when the
brides head was turned he surrepti,
i tiously handed me a well-flled envel,
ope. / bowed them out, thinking !
had been we'll paid for my trouble. ]
hurried to my oom and told my wife
she could have the new bonnet she
had been plaguing me about. l tore
open the envelope, and what do you
suppose was in it?"
Hundred dollars or 500"
"Ten sheets of reporters copy
paper I think that fellow Was a
member of the press"
"Then, there's the marriage-certii
cate dodge. It's a good one. I've had
it played On me and | know of a num-
Der of others who have suffered. Here
is my case: An apparently well-to-do
couple came to my house and | MARI
ed them. After the contamination of
the ceremony the groom said he want
ed a handsome certificate with a costly
frame.
"*Let it be nice; anything below
s25 will slit. Call it twenty-iye,'
said he, strokiDg his mustache pomp-
ously.5 when can l have it?'
Il Uole| him it he'd call in in the lat
ter part of the week I'd have a nice
one for him. The certificate and
frame cost me ST.. They were gorge
Gus. That's the frame up there around
my grandmother" said the minister,
signing. ''The certificate can be pur-
chased at cost price.
another case Is fresh in my memo
~, as it is of recent date. After |
had married a couple the groom jing-
led the contents of his pockets and
then withdrew his closed hand. AS |
bowed him from the front door he got
between me and the bride, and shak-
ing my hand warmly, placedaa large
coin in it as he babe me a hearty goud-
bye. 1 have thstfoin yet. Here it
is" And the dominic produced a
leaden sinker that had been beautiful
ly rounded and saud-papered to make
it resemble a $50 gold piece.
"Checks drawn on broken banks or
banks that never had any existence, or
banks where they neve heard of the
drawer, cannot be classed under that
head. The ministers of our cities
could furnish a fine collection of these
If they were called upon to do so. The
of these depraved beings
takes the form of bashfulness.
They make believe that they are too
bashful to offer the money in the pres
ence of the bride. Whenever / hear a
bashful man jingling in his pockets, l
am not certain that his pocket does
not contain nails or keys until he pro-
duces a coin, and | am not certain of
genuineness of the coin until L.
have tested it with my teeth. An
.God-fearing man comes out
and in presenting his offering
makes a little joke about his bride be-
ing worth it. or something of that
Kind. That makes us all happy, and
is no need of fracturing ones
.eeih.
However, | was once fooled by a
nan who did this very same thing.
He had neglected to provide a ring
md / loaned him one | always had on
land. After the ceremony he return
ID it, asking me what my charge was.
told him we made no charge, but if
le felt inclined to remunerate me he
'ould do so. He loosely remarked
hat he guessed his bride was worth
'25. and If she proved good he'd send
US on every anniversary of the wed
ling. He called for pen and ink and
He'd out a check. He insisted upon
ny praying for their welfare before
hey left, and / did so. They had
lever heard of him at the bank where
he check was drawn"
"And you was a prayer outf"
"One minutel | really felt like
mending that petition, for it was a
ervent $25 one. trust the wayward
outh was benefited by it. He need
d all the prayers he could obtain by
alse pretenses. The ring he handed
ack to me was not mine. When he
cit into his pocket for the check he
.changed it for a ive-cent brass one.
have used 1t ever since when occa-
lon required."--NeU York World.
Olives.
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