Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-11-22
JOSH BILLINGS
4 Few Anecdotes OF the Great Humorist's
Remarkable Self Posse 'sion.

q Few Anecdotes OF the Great humorists
Remarkable ifPosse 'si"n.
Before I left New York called on
Josh Billings with an album and mod
estly solicited his autograph. He took
it on his knees, gave his mouth COM
cal twist AID wrote:
Thrice is he armed who hath his quarrel
just"
The Bard Of Aron
'And four times he who gets his blow in
fust."
j BuliRqs
Josh was extremely fond of animals
and had cat in his house at Albany
which he gravely addressed As vii
liam" l suggested that that was dig
nitiea name for puSs, a cats were
usually called Tom or "Tip,' or =
quick. short coguomen.
But that's a special. swell. blue
blooded specimen of the feline race, |
wish YOU to know" rejoined the hu-
morist. Re emily, poor fellow. he has
had fits and since then call him Fitz-
William
When RubinStein was over here he
was presented to Josh. and the pianist
was careful 10 impress the American
with accounts of the nobility Of his an
cestors. My family said he loftily,
goes ba k to the time of the Crusaders.
NV researches IN this direction enabled
me to discover that one of NV ances-
tors accompanied the Emperor b rbs-
roSsa.' Josh smiled. and affecting to
be immensely impressed. Immediately
remarked. ''On the piano, of course.
A story is told of the humori>t being
thrown on one occasion among a batch
of students in + country town near New
Haven. He was tramping along with
a rusty yellow dog. and entered the
bar-roonI Of hotel for some refresh
ments. A group Of the Yale lads
chanced to be there on frolic, aud inn
mediately interviewed Billings, whom
ihey evidently mistook for farmer.
They inquired with affected interest
after the health of his wife and chill
dren and Josh. with counterfeited
simplicity. gave them graphic ac-
count Of his family and farm.
.'Of course you belong to the Church,"
asked one of the boys.
Yes. the Lord be praised. and my
father and grandfather before me. y
Now. l suppose you would not tell
q lie," said one of the students.
Not for the world
what will you take for that dog
pointing to Josh's cur, which was
cTouching beneath his chair.
81 won't take twenty dollars fer that
dog"
Twenty dollars, Why, he's not
worth twenty cents.
a assure YOU | would not take iwen-
ty dollars for him"
Come. my friend" said the student,
who. with his companions. was bent on
having some fun with the old man.
"Now. say you won't tell lie for
the world Let me see if you will not
do it for S2O. I'll give you $50 for
your dog"
I'll not take it.
"You will not' Here let me see if
this will not tempt you to lie," added
the student, producing a small bag of
half dollars, which he built up into
small piles on the table. Josh was sit
ting by the table with his hat in
his hand, apparently unconcerned
There" added the student, there are
twenty dollars. all in silver; will give
you that for the animal" Josh quietly
raised his hat to the edge of the table.
and. as quick as thought, scraped all
the money into it, except one half dol
lar. and then exclaimed:
Il won't take your twenty dollars.
Nineteen and half is as much as that
dog is worth; he is your property"
A Tremendous shout from his fellow
students clearly showed the would-be
wag that he was completely sold and
that he need not look for sympathy
from that quarter, so he good d-nsturedly
himself beaten. Phila-
delph,d Times.