The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1885-09-19
A FINE DAY FOR CRANKS.
The Remarkable Assortment of Luna.
tics that a Physician and
Reporter Met.
New York SUM-

tics that Physician and
Reporter Met.
New York SUM-
"That man is crazy" said we'll
known doctor, who makes a specially
of diseases of the nervous system, to
friend the other day, as they were
standing on the corner of Broadway
and Twenty-third street.
"How do you know ?"
"Watch him Walk
The man was tall middled-aged,
we'll dressed and painfully angular.
He was little more than an animated
skeleton. His walk, however, would
give ono an altogether different opinion
of him. He had the gait peculiar to
corpulency. He threw his legs out
like fat man, and carried his arms
away from his body, as if he was
afraid of crowding his sides.
"Crazy as WITCH" continued the
Doctor. 81 know all about him.
Years ago when he was young, his
thinness was matter of general gossip.
The boys plagued him about it, and
the girls made all manner of sport of
him. Finally, he began to take it to
heart, and he became so down.spirited
that I was called in. I discovered,
after talking to him short time, that
his imagination had great deal TO do
with his ailment, and so told him he
was not thin but corpulent. At first
he laughed at me, then he became
angry and accused me of making fun
of him, but finally persuaded him
was right. Next cautioned his fami-
~ about him, and by my advice his
mother took in a seam in the back of
his vest, set back the buttons on his
coat, and shortened the waistband of
his trousers every night, and every
morning he would find his clothes har-
der to get into. In a short time the
joke leaked out, and his friends began
Joke him about beaing mountain
Of flesh. He soon became a firm be-
lever in his massive size, until now
he Is mOnOmaniac on that subject.
He doesn't take any violent exercise,
and ever few weeks he comes to my
Office for medicine, and have to put
him on antifat diet to keep him salts
fled. Carry it too far? Mercy no.
He would have died in less than six
months if I hadn't been called in. He
is we'll Oft now, successful business
man, and, save for his singular fancy.
perfectly sane"
While the physician was speaking a
low-browned, sharp-eyed man, wearing
SLOUGH hat and rough and-ready
suit of clothes, took stand near the
pair and eyed them SO closely that tho
layman called the attention of the Doc
tor to his actions.
"Crazy, too," replied the physician.
n 10 ss,tn
crank"
After sharp and searching scrutiny
the man retired few steps, partially
turned his back on the couple, and
pulling a card which resembled pho.
tograph from his pocket, he compared
1t with them. Then with chuck lie,
he patted the card in a congratulations
way and replaced it. Then taking a
note book from his pocket, he rapidly
wrote few lines in IL. He put this
hastily into his pocket, when he
saw he was observed, and with
parting glance, which conveyed min
gled shrewdness, EMULATION, and bitter
undying hatred, he disappeared in the
crowd.
"WelI, he is a character"
"Hit it first time," responded the
physician. "That is just what he is.
Old Sleuth, the detective. That is
the character he impersonates. He
was once barber, and had very
good business, but he INDUCED too fire.
quently in the pernicious literature
which he kept for his customers. From
this he went to dime novels and flash
story papers, until his friends were
obliged to have commission appoint
ed to investigate his mental condition.
A guardian was appointed and as he
has sufficient means TO support himself,
he is allowed his liberty. He is per.
fectly harmless and, beyond his re.
markable freak, Is an estimable, though
eccentric, member of society.
AT this moment Old Sieuth reap
peared from another direction, took
out his photograph, wrote some more
In his notebook, and, with another
glance of shrewdness, mingled once
more with the throng and was gone.
Swarm day, DOCTOR" remarked q
stout man with n face like red sunset
as he approached the pair.
ayes" replied the physician as he
winked significantly at his friend.
s'By the way, doctor, do you suppose
can find the elixir in that drug store
across the street,"
"No doubt of it," answered the
Doctor.
"Thanks. You have saved my life, "
said the fat man, gratefully, as he