Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1885-09-19

An Elephant and a School Board. -Ho,
the Mauti'ssburg Girls Exercise. ~ Fash
ion and its Wicked Tendencies. Need
ed IN Mart6asbuyg, a Directory of Wash
ington City.-The Sitting Propensity o
the City Fathers.-A Problem IN Letters
Personal Poi,ats.-7he Firemen's US
1t to the Harrisburg Centennial.-The!
Took the Cake.-A Descriptive Series.
The scholars of the Grammar Schoo
have drawn the traditional Elephant
and the School Board don't seem to know
what to do with it. Next thing the pub
lie will be SO ungrateful as to exercis,
an opinion, and marvel that SO simple {
question should be "poser " for tn,
learned gentlemen who have SO success
fully sat in Judgment upon the menta
and practical ability of other people.
Speaking in the interest of nobody il
particular. and the scholar Is and citizen /
and frequently expressed criticisms il
general, we should like to see the mat
ter satisfactorily settled which we tax,
this method of assuring the people tina
it will be. All large bodies move slowly
(exsept in cases of fire or an election
and, given time enough, we feel like
stating positively that they will T" gel
there"
A gentleman from abroad remarked
to me upon the healthful state of the
Martinsburg girls, and asked for solu
ton of it. THE latest is to be fragiley
frail, delicate and all that
1t happened to be evening, and you
know how the girls do patronize Queen
St., and couldn t think of anything else
to tell him than that it was largely due
to exercise. And then he wanted to know
what kind of exercise, 3" did they work p
talk about women being curious, let a
man once get an idea into his head and
he's SO proud of its capture,-or his cap
ture, whichever you like-that he holds
on to it as if it was gold.) Well, being
afflicted more or less with the same dis.
ease that made George Washington a
moral joke, didn't feel at liberty to give
the girls away. Then he said that one OF
our society boys had told him that the
Martinsburg girls could do more prom
enading to the square evening than any
other girls of their size and capacity in
the country. All I've got to say about it
is that if the girls ever find out who the
young man is, he would be wise to ira
verse these streets under the shelter and
security of policeman Poisal's coat tail.
~
When it comes to matter of fashion,
there is any amount of range, and just
about this time of the year this momen-
tous question is condensation of uncer-
tainty, with an occasionally false alarm
of 10 here, and 10 there. The musical
girl is out again. She goes pasty with
a swift swishy rustic, and tinkle-tink-
that sets you to think
ing of pastoral scenes and all that. To
read some of the latest notes and reviews
on this fascinating subject, any foreigner
would imagine that the American girl
was fit candidate for the lunatic asy-
lum, or that fashion writers are rapidly
up to the standard of the city
publisher who advised his correspondent
to = be wicked, and if you dare not be
wicked, be as wicked as you dare" One
of them says thatthesnake in highlycolor-
ed naturalness, is the latest garniture for
hose, and adds that it's due to an inherit
ed interest in his snakeship. That sounds
and yet-and-yet-I cannot
but reluctantly think that if mouse
had surprised Eve with any indications
of an interview on the fruit question,
we would all be in Paradise yet.
And now some of the boys and girls
who took in the Mt. Vernon excursion,
keep asking how the streets in Washing
ton City favor tangled web. Is there
no truthful James who will rise and ex-
plain?
~
Now that the Public Library business
has been killed off there is chance for
the city fathers to stand up until some
other project presents itself to be sat
down upon. This don t include the gen.
ial pharmacist, since properly speaking)
he cannot be called one of the "City
~
l got postal card the other day, and
this is what it said:
mste sora cprispal CHAN stewtler tur
com dwon pistl drdg par ct recwd ane
niw pade ressdw ne humogundy swong
send satta endy ard alleige yaw ser, ed
ward tucker recdy letter sat
16 Teles cut
wells yhu see hid.
1t looks and sounds as though the
writer was laboring with a cold in his
head, when he complained in this wise.
can make out something about coming
down with pistol, and spade and swear
and Saturday night, and that shall see
but really I don t know wheth-
er it is from somebody who has heard that
l give free advertisements occasionally
or whether it's from some of the victims
of ''Chat," who hides behind the name
of Edward Tucker, and proposes pistols
and coffee for two, in this outlawed glib
berish. Anyway, take this method Of
assuring the author that forgive him
and will seriously consider any com
plant he may make in the Kings Eng