Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1885-12-07
ANNAPOLIS, Nd MONDAY EVENING, DECEMBER 4 1885,
wIT AND HUMOR.

but '.just for the fun of il.
Girls in India wear rings in their
noses. As they seldom use handker-
chiefs. says writer, the Inconvenience
Is not great
Twas poor little yellow banana
peel, and tho young man ground it be-
meath his heel; twas brick in the
sidewalk. hard aud red. and the young
man ground it beneath his head.
A down-East fire company, in . res
olution on q deceased member, say:
He has responded 10 his last alarm.
It's wonder that they didn't add that
.'he has gone to his last fire. "--LosOeu
Times.
An exchange asks the meaning OF
the word Jackpot" A jackpot we
take it. is utensil in which Jack cooks
his dinner when he is camping out
Or something that way. NorTistoDn
Herald.
An Iowa Judge has decided that a
man is in duty bound to tell his wife
where he spends the evenings when he
is away from home. This decision Is
all right to a certain extent, but sup
pose the man doesn't knowp-Phila-
dclthid Press.
There are ten editors of the college
paper published at Princeton, and they
have their hands full during the base
ball season. One writes editorials to
show how American colleges should be
conducted in order TO increase their
usefulness, and the other nine conduct
the baseball department NorristoWn
Herald.
A young man denounces straw bon
nets because they chafe his ears.
Here, now is question for scientists.
Can they explain how it is that bon
net worn by one person can chafe the
ears of another person not wearing itP
Enp How's thatP Dwell, well, now
that may be. How stupid not to see it
before.
A tradesman at Colchester closed his
doors and affixed outside the following
notice.: ''Gone to Mersea regatta
open again at o'clock. The hour
having passed and the engagement to
open at z having been broken, some
cruel wag appended to the above no
tice, in large characters, '.Drunk and
can't get home"
..Is the musical critic IMP My name
is 'Iggins. | ave just arrived from
Hengland and am about to sing ere.
| would like to ave you mention in
your notice my chest notes" Here
the umpire of the concert-room glared
at him and growled, 'Chestnuts! o,
you want to see the funny man over in
the dark corner there. "-BoStOn Com
nserctGL Bstletin.
Simpson and his wife were on their
way to church, and the lady was put
ting on her gloves. my DEAR said
he, pettishly, '.you should complete
your toilet at home. I'd just as soon
see a woman putting on her stockings
on the street as putting on her gloves.,'
Most men would, she said promptly.
and the abashed husband didn't say
another word. P,ttsburg CAronic.e.
He was in the habit OF coming home
night after night at o'clock In the
morning. She grew weary of this and
rendered his latchkey useless by lock-
ing the front door. He was obliged to
ring the bell, and was horror-stricken
when his wife appeared at the window
and murmured: go away, George;
1 expect my husband home every mo-
ment." He has become very domesti-
Gated since. boston GGzette.
4 Utica paper reports the case of "a
beautiful girl, unusually robust, who
has become raving maniac through
over-indulgence in roller skating"
This is very sad. The telegraph re-
ported the case, Monday. of the Rev. j.
Il. Speck. prcacacr of Canton, Ga,
who attempted to commit suicide while
''deranged on the question of holiness"
This is also very sad. -A AorristosOn Her
aid.
Medical item: '.Tn some parts of
South America people live to be over
100 years old. There are no doctors
there ut all. Isn't that wonderfule''
A.-What physician have you. dear
friend?
B.-The Prof. S.
A.--Whatl that charlatanl How
are you to he same Gomez
B.-Throu; h my wife, who him upon
me in manner forced has, that him
absolutely not again offshake can. She
met him, before he yet our family phys
ician was, one time with q friendess.
and asked him why she always 50 cold
feet had, wherenpon he answered:
THAT comes about because your feet
so small are that not enough blood
therein place has. !" Herewith was
the evil done, and my wife will have
no other doctor now. Translated
from Der Osnnibus
..Nlr.. Maxwell Stevenson has two
little children whose quaint conceits
make them IS delightful 20 the sum-
mer residents at Ardmore as Helen's
babies were to their ma.
A day or two ago. as they were tod
ding down the road, one said. point
ing to house BY the wayside:
THAT is where Mr.. Jones was