The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1885-10-03
CARVING.
Riu Nye Relates the Reason Why He Ban
ishes His Children from the Table,
4 koo1c ~ A. - p


have heard, and certain children have
faculty of working the truth in at the
wrong time. Truth is q good thing-in
its place. But the great harm comes
from using it at an inopportune time.
am the only and original father of
one of the class of children who are
loauacious and truthful in way that
makes the parent heart bleed some-
times. If this little incident did not
happen to make me its victim, l would
scorn to tell it, for people ought not to
make themselves or their children too
conspicrously smart in print
Guests were invited to dinner, and
while in my baronial hall the welkin
rang and the cod baked bean was
passed around amid joyous laughter,
and witty remarks rang out on the
warm air, while the gorgeous fagons
and glittering cut glass and silver of a
a neighbor shone resplendent beneath
the mellow light of the chandelier and
candelabra, the humble writer of these
lines, rs the host, would ever and anon
make brilliant remark which would
be received with wild and tumultous
applause.
Ii a guest sought to evade his duty
as an applauder, or to come in on time
with his or her welcome plaudit, that
guest was marked by the eagle eye of
the carvist, and he was given the neck
of the turkey and the wing Of the duck
as mark of respect.
Habitual guests at my house have
learned this, and when ladle out the
gravy and Jew de spirit, as A. Ward
called it, they know that they can take
their choice between boisterous laughter
and starvation. In this way the meal
passes off with much ecldt. For each
slash of the carving knife there is a
suitable joke, and those who have been
in the habit OF eating at my table are
aware that there is a proper moment for
mirth, just as there is for napkins,
6ngerbowls or coffee.
do this partly because 1 want to
draw attention from my carving. Ny
carving is like my dancing. It is not
conventional. 1t Is extremely original,
bold and audacious. try to introduce
joints where nature did not intend to
have them, and seek to make short
cuts across fowl in way that is pro-
ductive only of chagrin, vexation and
fragments of hen. Man is q weak, fall
Gble creature, and he ought not to seek
to monkey with the anatomy of fowl
or to improvise joints and apertures
where they do not belong; for at such
time as you think not the knife will
slip, and it will tip over the celery
glass and fill the bosom of a warm per-
sonal friend with gravy.
To attract attention and keep up the
spirits OF the company, therefore, I
make it kind of business, as it were,
to fill the air with harmless amusement
at the same time that I shed stuffing
through the atmosphere and mutilate
the bosom Of the hen. This gives me
an opportunity, occasionally, to gather
up the sage, breadcrumbs and gizzards
out OF my lap, and reNrn them to the
platter without exciting remark.
A few weeks ago, on an occasion of
THIS kind, cousin of mine-a young
lawyer connected with the Omaha Road,
asyoung man of good parts, and whose
business it is to stand between the
Omaha Road and substantial justice, at
80 much year and travelling expenses
was present
II had just said something smart to
Keep the company good-natured, while
1asked young lady at the other end
@ the table to please return the duck
Ehich l had inadvertently presented to
ner with the carving-for stuck in it.
Every one was laughing joyously and
trying to conceal it by putting their
napkins in tneir mouths; when nv
cousin turned to my little daughter and
said:
Bessie, haven't you got q funny
papa, though?"
Yes. indeed" said the ungrateful,
unhliai and irreverent heir apparent to
agfeat name; you better believe he's
1unny-when we have company"
:, And yet people wonder why am not
The same genial host that I used to be,
and why the children do not eat at the
nrst table, and why there is sound of
alcklnS against the door of an adjoin-
ing room, and the occasional wall of
hungry child as the meal progresses.
Eli Perkins once told me that he was
geachlng his little girl to tell the truth.
asked him who he employed to attend
70 the irksome task, and whether he
was not rash to take up branch of the
science for which there was getting to
De SO little use.
II Is said that truth is mighty and
xlii prevail. 1t is certainly mighty in
tne mouth of q child Still, we may
Gways expect more or less of it from
onldren-until they get to moving in
good society and learn better.
AVOID an angry man for while--a
malicious man forever.