Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-03-26
BRIGHT BITS.

BosToNEsE for Cold Day-"There is yet no
meteorological indication that spring has
come.'- TRANSCRIPT.
WHAT is the II eaningo OF the phrase ''passing
stranger asked the teacher. SHOWING the
queer" said the head boy.-Pdtts6Wr0 Chr0R-
icls.
If the race had been between a Boston
horse car and hare, instead of tortoise and
a hare. everything indicates that the hare
would have come in flrst.-BOston Post.
a FAsHION PAPER says ''the new underskirt
pretends TO be full when it is not" In this
respect it differs from the man who meets his
wife IN the hall when he comes home Late
LO1CeU Citizen,
MARCY AVENUE LANK-"Good evening,
Miss. Do you rinkulate this EVENING"" Lee
avenue slimlet-''NOt this evening; but my
sister Kate viii ZampillarOtate. Good even
iDg.'-BrOOkIgR Eagle.
TIE New York prison officers are being
| hauled over the Goals because they force con-
victs to attend one sort of preaching all the
time. A murderer belonging to one denomi
nation doesn't want to SIT through a sermon
| by preacher of another, and the officers
ought to know it.-Detr0U Free Press.
REAL San Francisco Joke: An old lady
was viewing the exposed stock of some burnt
out dry goods store on Market street, few
daSs ago. he burnt-edged bales were all
strewn across the sidewalk. Above was
| sign, Another SCcrIlce." "Another sacri-
nce," said the old lady. Eyes, burnt offer
| l1gSs''-sodn Francisco CHTONtcte.
Mrs. MINKs-"Oh. yes, you can talk about
single blessedness, but al the same, statistics
prove that more bachelors than married men
| commit suicide" Mr.. Oldbach-"Yes, that is
true" ''Oh, yOu admit it yourself. then.
| Now, please explain why they commit sui
eide" They are driven insane by other peo-
! pies babies. y Philadelphia cal.
A GERMAN went into a restaurant, and as
| he took his seat an Irish waiter came up and
| bowed politely.
''Wie Gents" said the German, also bowling
! politely.
.'Wheat cakesw shouted the waiter, mistak-
| ing the sautatiOn for an order.
''Sein, nelnn' said the German.
| "NineP' said the waiter. you'll be lucky
/ il you get ee."-Ee0 York Sun
"wTNTER fingers in the la" He never
/ got there. Out in the cold, silent night, tie
! blinking stars gaze sadly down on the shat
| tered remnant of humanity that adorns the
! walk underneath our three-story window,
/ and the piercing northern blast etches on the
| picturesque fr5stwOrk of our window pane
! the following epitaph: "Died, by myster-
! out visitation of Providence, through the
| agency of one of that special and most highly
| esteemed class OF His servants-an cditOr."-
/ DdRSUiie Breese.
| WOMAN's CRUELTY to woman has made
| thousands fail to speak To each other. Cicely
| had just dropped in to congratulate her friend
! on pleasant prospects directly after Lent. so,
| I'm so glad for you. my dear. Augustus
always was such charming company. On,
| he's real nice. He paid me marked attention
| half dozen years ago" "Indeed! | believe
| I've heard him say something about you being
| IA very dear friend of his mother" The coffee
| crea froze in the little quaint pitcher on the
! table. So did the mornings conversation
| Hartford Post.