Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1885-08-01
LEONE LOCAL CHAT.

q - -
A Etal-fedsed ErpIandtion.-An inn
Daense Picnic. The Frederick Band
their generous Serendde.-7ne Ian
g,tdge Of Style, some Suggestions,
Tame Bears, achat the People thin
about Mens.-Me Moonlight Picnic
"A Commemorate Improvement. =
Or Friends. - Personal Points, &c.
My friend, of Jones Spring, your
surmise was quite correct. 1t was
my intention, my full-fiedged inten
ton, to write of Zdccheus as the
climber of biblical fame. / suspect ]
shall have to plead guilty to cleal
case of wool-gathering, tho violent
opposition to Luther Miller intended
with a far-linked connection between
Simeon and Zaccheus as similarly
watching and waiting to see some
thing. ought to admit that if you
had not so politely called my atten.
tion to the misnomer, / should not
have INDUCED tie public with this
lucid explanation the parties most
interested being dead, and i'm coun-
try to which the newspaper fraternity
have no passes, and likewise where
the power of the press is felt and fear
ed no more. In fact, | might bring
on in this connection a surging, over
flowing Saratoga trunk full of reasons
familiar to quill drivers of all Sizes
from the editor in chief, who Z" has
just stepped out" to the party who is
too busy "just now to explain,-will
see you later, "-down to those who
know that the public will explain for
them. Last but not least, we felt Sc
cure in the conclusion that our biblical
wise people would attribute it to a
change in the revised edition, and we
should escape scot free.
M
The Catholic Picnic last Saturday
was the largest known this season,
the sale of tickets al this point alone
numbering one thousand and sixty
The committee spared themselves in
nothing that could add to the pleas
ure and enjoyment of all who attend
ed, and the result was an unusually
pleasant time.
The Frederick City band, which came
up for the occasion, gave our citizens a
general serenade from the piazza of the
hotel. They are +" natural" musicians,
with talent we'll cultivated, and practic-
ed fingers. The selections they gave us
were of high order. finely executed,
and were loudly applauded by the pleas
ed audience. Mr.. Bion Firestone, the
leader of the band, is well remembered
by the people of this town, and especial
ly by his friends on King and John Sts.,
who used to listen to his deft handling
of the violin and piano and his whistling
rendition of the mocking bird. The
Frederick City band will always find a
welcome among us.
~
I'm awfully sorry, Captain, that
couldn't help you out with your transla-
ton of Worth's expression in satin and
laces. l regret it all the more since any
thing ION the fine dixie" around here
is angelic in its seldomness. You done
very well tho at first wrestle with the
subject, considering that in all this broad
land overflowing with the lords of crea-
ton, there are only phenomenal two,
Worth and 'Clara BELIEF who have
undertaken to interpret the very alert
language of dress.
l don't mind telling you, entire nous,
that if you get in any such pinch again,
Just draw the bundle of femininity aside,
(you might try personal magnetism for
this, but saucer of ice cream would be
surer,) and in your well known charm
ing manner request her to describe what
manner of toilette she wears. You
might add a few judicious remarks de-
ploring your inability, and vow that in
your eyes it is thing of beauty second
only to the wearer, whom you cannot
doubt will fill the second branch of the
sentence by being joy forever; and
m sure it would be needless for me to
add that you might improve upon this to
any extent that your conscience would
permit, but the foregoing would be suf-
ticient to bring the Statesman a full de-
scription, written on both sides of the
sheet, and sandwiched with adjectives
that it will melt your heart to have to
eliminate and there will be supple
ment of instructions as to where to put
it in the paper, and what to say about 1t
editorially, that will save you much time
and trouble and there will be an accom-
paniment of boquet and cake, which as
an expression of regard and combina
ton of delicate bribery, show that far
reaching subtle diplomacy which politi-
clans envy and the average man looks
upon with awe and uncertainty. But
take it all in all, it's rather a better way
than to strike out wildly into the aver
age phrases, such as - cut bias and gor-
ed y" ravishing fit, diaphanous dra-
perry" with illusions to angels, &c. l
once heard befogged editor say to a
lady, you look like an angel, nay more,
like an archangel," and when he seen
that she hardly looked as pleased as he
to see her, he spent the rest of
the evening wondering whether the
woman S rights question standing so far
below par in the world of spirits, had
to do with it. He is a great
statesman, a man of wonderful ability,
but to this day he puzzles in vain for the
to the effect of that speech.
N. B. AS a rule it would be as we'll to
follow the example of wise society e6i-
tor, who eats the boquets and uses the
cake for paper weights.
Talk of animals not having any intel
lect the tame bears that held forth
around town last week are lively demon
stratio ions to the contrary. They tum-
BILE " to the chengh ga ba gang lang of
IiClI OOliCAlAAAh hSSPSADt NAeAh AAHNAS
facility, while our eminent Professors,
Messrs. Ryneal, Pitzer and Brown, give
it up as worse than Choctaw. But then,
there's George Criswell, Jim Thompson,
Grant Pitzer and Harry Doll, who say
they could conquer the language-they
they had special aptitude "
for it, but wouldn't say what. 1t can't
be in the dancing-no similarity there
nor IN on aptituda for amb-- norish
the thought. relegate the solution to
special jury, with Dave Mcllhenny as
foreman.
~
The NJ. C. Band excursion to Potomac
Isle was pleasant affair.
~
The new st. Joseph's Academy is rap
idly nearing completion and is very
great improvement upon the old, small
building heretofore used at least two
thirds more room has been added by the