Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-16
BRIGHT BITS.


the door belle.-EncAdn0e.
STRANGE to say lacquer work keeps many
people busy IN. DISQUALIFICATION Commercial
Bulletin.
REFLECTED GLORY: Visitor-"And who
are you, my little man. Cuthbert with
conscious pride)-"Im the baby's brother"
TALK about patience on a monument! For
a picture OF CAIN content observe plumber
waiting for his helper to go to his shop for
tools.
AN exchange tells how base balls are made.
| Having read the article carefully, we fancy
we know why boarding house fish balls are
indigestible.-Pu
MISS ERNEST HULsEKAMP, who was Miss
Morosini, is studying Tor the stage, II she
were studying for the hack her husband could
give her lessons.-AeO orleans Picdy1b7le.
AN Arizona paper says: "The American
hog holds mis- own We have noticed this,
and also the fact that he generally says the
seat next him is also engaged.-B0st0fa Post.
A FOURTH STREET boarding house keeper
was at a loss TO know why one OF her bOarders
carried two pieces of steak from the table up
into his bedroom. She found it out when she
saw he had got new hinges on his trunk.-F1U
Ri0er Ad0Gnce.
1T has always seemed a very curious
thing to me" said the lady of the theatre,
and then she paused. well, said her hus-
band little impAtiently; what is II that
always seemed such a curious thing TO you? p"
why that baldheaded men should care to sit
so near the flies food Cheer.
FIRST HEN-"There comes the woman to
drive us out Of her garden" Second hen
fly out quick First hen-''NO, mo; stay
here" Second hen-"But she's aiming right
for u.s." FIRST heR-"Yes. and if we move we
might get hIt."-CAtoago Tribune.
SARAH, has he?''
mo, ma am
hot II, bo 4 lragr Loo
'''Fhe circus is coming next week, mother,
and he's asked me TO go with him.
"Pshaw And is that AL? | was in hopes
he'd popped" Chicq0O Ledger.
JOHN BANNIsTER. the comedian, was pre-
| sented to an Old lady proud of ancient and
noble blood. The lady asked a wit of the day.
who was present; Who are the Bannisters?
Are they good family?' YES" says the
wit, very good, indeed; they are closely con-
nected with the Stairs" oh" said the lady,
"a very ancient family of Ayrshire. dat s
back to 1850! l am delighted to see your
friend. "-E1cbdn1e.
WILLIAM MATTHEWS eloped with the wife
of James Secrist, OF Comanche county, Tex
and when he afterwards called on Mr.. Secrst
for the personal effects of the lady that gen
leman shot HIM dead. 1t served him right
| HI should have known that his last act was
an objectionable breach of Texas etiquette
After YOU have eOped with another mans
| wife II is not proper TO look AT him except
| over the sight of self-cocking revolver
| ChicGgO Neios
DIOGRNEs IN CUCAGo.-"You are looking
| tough, Q DiOgeHes" quoth Socrates. Now,
by the dog, what have you been dOing?"
- have been searching for an b0nest man
I IN the Chicago CITY Council" replied the
grim philosopher. mournfully.
with what resutf' inquired the other
"Well. YOU see" said DiOgCnes, sarcastic
| ally, my pockets are cleaned out and my
I lantern is gone, praise Zeus that they left
me my girdle !'-CAica0O Nel6S
A WELCOME VISITOR -"Tell your mother
| that am coming to see her so0n," said a lady
| who was playing in front of the gate Il am
! glad you are comm and ma Will be glad TO
! see you, too" How do you know she will
! be glad tosee me2" asked Mrs. Sniverly. BE
/ cause | heard her say yesterday she would be
| glad to see somebody who didn't come here to
collect bill. She SAID nobody ever came to
| the house except men with bills. n-Tecas
| S3ftinGs.
LINES BY A REAL LORD
| u, u! If You did not come after 7,
And would 70 early you would make me
glad;
| But now know that L come fore "A V,
And that's what makes me sad.
What else could L Npect?
And fore an Y you come, and cane
That nothing like conscience now doth
trouble you
! u, u, ere long you'l think II quite EZ
To ask If won't W.
You're quite correct;
won't -Brool5Vn Eqgle.