The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1885-04-30
THE MERRY SlDEI

The MERRY SlDE!
The hogs are no longer impounded, but many of
them vigorously pounded.
With eggs at 1216 cents dozen, the farmers think
the hens might hold on bit
Every railroad in the United States should be aboi
ished. They all use the truck system.
There is now longer any doubt that Spring has
come. The old-plug-hat renovator is here.
| The man who cannot stand the smell of onions,
should begin to get ready to move at once.
Grants physicians have the chagrn of seeing their
patient getting better, right before their eyes.
little child at Akron, Ohio, took good big drink
of carbolic acid. At last accounts the corpse was
keeping well.
Columbus paper says "the police have not been
paid for five months. Then it is time for the police
to wake up.
A jackson fisherman started out to catch mess of
bass, on the strength of hearing the bass-singing
along the edges of the ponds.
There is much inquiry as to ''the outlook for
| wheat.' If old Dan. Winchell were only here now,
there might be something definite.
:" IS"
Many young man enters college with noble aim,
but lets go of his purpose aferwards-just as boy
does who tries to down hill a-hold of a cows
tail.
Gaudy colors seem to be the prevailing taste this
Spring. The brick buildings painted still more
fiery red-and even the loafer's assumes more
! intense color.
There is IA great deal of hollow pretension in this
world. The eagle is a high-fyer, and makes some
claim to nobility-yet he is thief and a murderer
'Conkling is dead! reioices the Mugwump, and
the Republican dude But the trouble is the naughty
New York Sampson pulled the Republican temple
down with him.
Cleveland expressed hmselfa few days ago wish
ing he Mayor of Buffalo again. Then he could
| take the vast gangs who come before him, and con-
sign them to the calaboose.
Nature sheds her beauty for all. The moon
which smiles tly upon the kiss OF the lovers at
front gae shows to the thief in the back yard where
the fattest chickens perch.
81 shall endeavor,' said the speaker, to collect few
scattering thoughts''-
.Never mfndr' yelled a boy in the gallery, "let the
scattered We'll git enough o. what's leftH'
We inquired of a mechanic few days ago, whether
he had any work on hand these hard times. ''Why,
I've got three houses to build,' said he, but the
trouble is, they acant them all to-nnOrro~"'
why don't you wash that face ?'' inquired Jack
son man of little street urchin. Because don't
want it washedr' the stunning reply, which cut
off all further debate upon the question.
No eager Democrat has yet appeared a seeker
after the Gubernatorial nomination. That isn't
strange They loaded it themselves, this time, and
they know how it will be when the old thing goes off.
School Teacher-stHow many genders are there?''
Small Boy-"Three!'
Teacher-'sWhat are they:" =
Small Boy: sMasculine - Feminine - and - Mug
wump!n
VIM II. Vanderbilt is reported to be in dread of
paralysis. This is sad. A man who is compelled to
get along pittance of twelve hundred dollars an
hour, cannot afford to be paralyzed.
IS
We hear the gentle inquiry from Coalton to what
has been wrought by the anti-scrip law. What? Why
a general protection against the truck system, of
course. man does not have to take scrip ORDERS
now. unless he wants to- He didn't before.
+s+
A Jackson business man, on nearing his store-room
early one morning last week, remarked that this
thing getting to be serious.' There stood
drummer, with his head out of the door, watching
for the merchant. We did not learn whether he had
been watching for his man all night, not.
citizen of Jackson remarked few days ago that
the people made serious mistakes in fooling away
their lands trying to raise little patches of wheat
and cutting down all the b1ackberries pawpaws and
haws. why said he, man may do his best in
raising wheat, and he must come to town and buy
his hour.' But this man is not farmer.
A prominent educator informed us a
few days ago that boy in his charge be-
came in the habit of remaining away
from School. He made inquiry, but could
gain no satisfaction as to why the youth
did not make his appearance at School.
One day, however, a friend informed him
that the boy who missed School so fire.
quently was playing pool in low doggery
on Main Street. Investigation proved
this to be true, and the father of the
young man was duly informed, and the
practice stopped. We only refer to this
to show the danger boys are in, in this
town. No matter how good the boy, nor
how well he may be trained. there are
evil influences brought to bear to drag
him down, and instill in his mind a taste
for the low, brutal manners and customs
of the doggery, which he finds it next to
impossible to withstand.
The whole aim and hope of doggery-
keeper is to ruin somebody-drag some
body down. AS long as men are sober
and decent, there is no encouragement
for doggery in the neighborhood; as
soon as men begin to "tipple," the doggery
keeper begins to take heart, and see the
prospect of coming gain, and to redouble
his efforts to drag down not only those
men, but their children as well. The dog
gerry not debasing? About how much
comfort do you suppose doggery-keeper
would derive from community where
all the people remained sober and behaved
themselves? What advantage to his bus
mess is All education of learning? What
use has he for any of the ennobling int1u-
ences that elevate humanity? His only
hope of complete success is to turn the
community into crowd of tipplers and
drunkards. 1t becomes therefore the du-
ty of all good people to use every effort to
wipe out the evils clinging about this
horrible traffic.
Tie Sunday School Fair!
The great Sunday School Fair to be
held in Jones Hall, early in May should
command the attention and cooperation
of our citizens generally. By little eff