Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1885-08-10
Marriage Engagements.

Engagements are entered into at the
present time without the consideration be-
coming to matter of so great imp ortance.
We are often told that marriages are
contracted much later in life than they
used to be and that this seems the bet
ter way-but we doubt its being any wiser
course than that of early days, when, in
country towns especially, the young men
married soon after attaining their ma ori-
ty, choosing their wives from those in
their own station IN life, which is always
the better plan. In this case the young
woman knows that it is some work and
not all play in the combined home life
NV first advice therefore is, do not al
low yourselves to form unsuitable attach
ments. Next, no Young man has any
right to so monopolize young woman as
to deter others from showing her the ordi-
nary courteses of life. And no young
woman has any right to encourage atten-
tons she does not intend to reciprocate
Therefore, do not allow yourselves such
exclusive rights in one another as to cause
unpleasant criticisms to be made by out
side parties. Many life long distrust of
| human nature, as many life long heart
ache also, would be avoided were these
conditions of social intercourse observed.
! If. as the outcome of such obedience,
true affection is developed let an engage
ment be entered into advisedly, discreetly
and seriously for its abiding consequences
are almost as weighty as the marriage
VOW itself. Let your engagement be made
known as soon as can be consistently, for
| it is one of the things which it is consid-
cred harmless to deny, and much mischief
sometimes ensues from such thOughtless-
ness. So in this matter we say, seek not
to deny your engagement any more than
YOU would your marriage. The love of
display in dress is so great In many in
stances that Young men DESTROYS of max
ing shomes in the world" are deferred
thereirom otten-times on this account. So
that another caution is to be specially en-
phasized. seek not to mislead your lover
in this matter. Do not pretend an indiffer-
ence to dress that you do not feel. Above
all things be frank at the outset in this
matter of expenditure, and let the item of
dress conform to the acknowledged in
come. Always have this understood
previous to your marriage. 1t is ten fold
more manly and womanly to treat this
subject in sensible manner during
your courtship, than to allow it to
become source of annoyance later.
We hold it true, always, that no young
man has the right to ask young woman to
enter into matrimonial engagement with
out feeling it to be in his power to give her
a comfortable and reasonable support. Nor
is it unmaidenly. or indicate lack of mod
esty on her part to desire to know what
this is to be. 1t is not enough that her
parent or guardian inquire into the matter,
let her have an idea for herself, and if her
heart be in the right place. the knowledge
will be of benefit to both the contracting
parties. On the other hand the man should
not expect the woman to earn her own
support even though she may have been
accustomed so to do previously. On the
other hand, she should expect and wish to
be his true helpmeet in all things. And
in our judgement. those homes are the
happiest. when together they 60 on and
prosper in the accumulation of worldly
goods, or, if adversely overtake them.
feel that it came to them unitedlv, and
was not precipitated by fault of either
Mrs ELLEN BLISS HOOKER, in Good
ITo,t Eeep,no