Weekly graphic. [volume] (Kirksville, Adair Co., Missouri) 1880-1949, 1885-09-18
WITH THE PRESIDENT.

1t's wonder to me that some of
he Washington correspondents don't
station themselves in the Presidents
room and take in the funny
things that occur there said gentle
man, who has Just returned from
to COMMERCIAL repor-
ter. While | was IN Washington, !
called upon the President, and was
ushered into the reception room along
with probably twenty-five or thirty
others. Presently Mr.. Cleveland came
in. and, commencing a. one corner of
the room, went around from one 20
another hearing pleas and applications
of every nature.
Il was amused at one of the appli.
cants-a big, fat German from Illinois
who wanted a post office. He had a
batch of papers which he handed to
the President. You will have to
present these papers to the Postmaster
General said the President. politely.
Watts datP asked the applicant.
"You will have to present these
papers to the Postmaster General, re-
peated the President.
But mine frents, dcy dold me l
must gif dem to der President.
No; they must go TO the Postmaster
General
who vas der Postmaster Sheneral?'
Mr.. Villas
'Und der Bresident has nix to do
init dem babers?'
Nothing whatever. If was to re-
celve them would probably never
look at them
Now, Mr.. Bresident, wood you do
dat7'
L wouldn't have time to examine
them, and for that reason | refer you to
the Postmaster General, said the Presl-
dent.
With that the German shouldered
his batch ofpapers and lef:'
The next in turn was a well-known
Irishman from California, who during
the last National campaign went to
New York and made Democratic
speeches among the Irlshmen of that
State. When he grasped the Presi-
dents extended hand he said: 'Begad,
mister President, IFS a wonder to me
ye amt lohst yer mind. Furst ye are
tored by crazy Dootchman an now
ye are to be, haressed by woild irish
man. But it is not me as will detain
ye long. have come here from Cali
forny to ak ye tur position. l didn't
bring along wild me carload of ric-
concentrations nor anything lolke that,
preterrld ter simply state me case to
yer ixcillincy an lit yersilf be the judge
as ter me qualifications. l understand
as how the civil-service rules will pre-
vlnt many Dlmocrat from securing
offices to which they are Untitled. Phat
the divil does civil service amount 10
anyhow? Applicants under the civil.
service rules are requoired to answer
questions that any school boy is famil.
liar wild. For instance, one of the
problems to be worked is this: Sup.
posing dog is chasing a rabbit, the
rabbit has one hundred feet. the star
of the dog, the rabbit clears four fee
SIX inches at every jump, while tht
dog clears five feet three inches. How
long will it take the dog to catch tn,
rabbit! Now, there's a problem a
any school-boy could work out previd
ed the dog and rabbit kipt runnin
right straight along, But who cal
tell how many holes the rabbit nigh
run into, or how many times the do,
might sthop. Ye can see TOR yoursil
that the civil service examination
amount to nuthin'. But l didn't com
here to make spache agin the civ
service. cum here to procure al
appointment of some kind, l dom
care what it is. Me friends said to m
when started: 'Ye will git the COOS
Now l want to show 'em as how
man who laves his native State. travel
all the way TO New York ter max
Dimocratic spaches for the side phwa
comes out on top will not git the goose
lave my case in yer hands. Misthe
President, an hopes to hear from yol
soon.'
The President seemed to be favor
ably impressed with the Californian
who will no doubt secure a position o.
some kind
We are indebted to X. K. Wells. O.
Ralnbelt, Kans., for large and ex
cellent map of that beautiful country