Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-06-04
WIT AND HUMOR.


beef. perverseness in poultry, and vii
any in veal" Same at our boarding
H3 ouse. -Irdrelers' Magazine.
I'd New Jersey man wants divorce
because his wife hasn't spoken to him
- nearly two years. Some men don't
&now when they are well off. Hen
b eekcd Editor N0,ristol0n Herald.
"Ah! YOU hatter me, lisped dude
10 pretty girl with whom he was con-
* ersing. "No, | don't" was the re-
ply. "You couldn't be any flattcr than
kou are. - Darlington Free Press.
81 To write for all time is the ambition
u # every author. The man who origin
%ated the series Of negro-minstrel jokes
II the only one up to date who has APP
Marently succeeded in his endeavor.
u Hon. Charles Carroll, of Shawnee
town, has our thanks for q neat and
check. We transferred
st into bacon, and are transferring the
bacon into Drawn and brains. Benton
~ W) Herald
81 A little Williamstown girl had the
#whoopin-cough. and when she recover
bed from it she said she was glad she
l<lidn't die while she had the whooping-
cough, because God would not like to
#haye little coughing angels. y
At recent lecture delivered in a
Massachusetts town Anna Dickinson's
#audience consisted of one auditor and
8that a dude. Anna said it paid. OF
%course it did; how was it to get in if it
8tidn't pay?- Konbcrs Statesman
"No interruption of business on ac-
count of the weather. is the motto
kalamazoo hen nailed above her nest,
#and when the mercury was 81 degrees
@below zero She came of with brood
MOI young chickens - Detroit (Nich.)
PosL
81 "What amused me most at the OPP
3era, said au Arab Chief who had been
#aken to hear Faust, "was one of the
Dnusicians in the orchestra, seated lit.
- le higher than the rest, who performed
&on m invisible instrument with a
&tick "
n In q recent breach of promise suit
N he course Of true love was traced in
" his manner: Dear Mr. Smith, " My
&larIng john, my own darling
John, ~ My darling john" Dear
%John, Dear Sir, - "Sir," and all was
lover.
Tho To,va,1 Times rotos tbo foot tbot
H. Ci.iI V,r Lrol-a ant ana rolIor
SsEo,es were Invented tho same wear
@TLis il trun INIT tbn war did its worst
hand stopped in four years, while roller
skates continue to plumber and murder
even up TO this time. BOSTON Post.
Robinson (at the window -Uplloi
s,Tbnrn o.nas tGot woman Rrown's ~
sdead s[5ccf mi Mrs r (rnsbinc mn
wifi ovnita,onnN Wbera9 ,vh0p
where Whot Hot-in fine orov-----
why, George, how ridiculous you are!
That's his wife! robinson Exactly,
|my dear.-ftRch.
An Irishmen, recently over entered
IA barber shop in Main street. Danbury
Friday for shave. After the barber
was through ho asked the customary
questions Have bay rum, sir?'' mo,
|SOr-the fact is, sOr, / We lust had
Sla a, o. peer an 1 lS, I Joke hiAin
uIluNS' 14"'Jo.ls I '".o9
EA'inlil eI No"' Il i We're 10 give
fifty marbles in charge OF this boy"
Cndieating The biggesD' ito divide
equally amongst you, how many would
you each receiver Small boy (of ex-
penence) --"tIcase' slr' we shouldn
get none at aiIi cause he d collar them
an li9S'-. ','|.'''.' L ''"'"'
81 see, remarked FARMER Hoedown
OF Hackensack to his wife the otherday
as ne was reading hls morning paper
'that Ffoi. follem OF London says
lencn - healthy exercise Tor girls.
Now thai S what told Melindy and
Mary Jane when we was a laying that
thousand-rod "orm-ience last fall
The following order for block Of
teeth aas been received by dentist OF
Triangle, n. Y: "AIy mouth is three
inches acrost. inches through the
jaw; some humocky on The edge;
shaped like q horseshoe, toe forward
If youwant me to be more partik' lar |
shell hay to cum thar. Yours truly,
-."
"WhaGs lhat you have in your
haud?" asked Mrs. Gimlet of her hus-
band as he brought home roll of man