Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1885-10-16
A BOGUS GENTLEMAN.
The Insincere Mana Misplaced
Hero.
A Hotel Clerks Experience with = bespIo-
able Creature whose Elegant ways Aad
Polished DIctIOn Were Exhibited
Only Among Strangers.


I
flrst meeting with him. Neither did see
him at a county fair or under q canvas
tent placarde1 with signs Of skeleton mOu,
electric b. 'ys, fat women, educated pigs
and other freaks
II was I'm the fall of the year that I got
q day of and took q run up to Newburg
and back by river. 1 jlst had q delight
fully com for IAble time all alone, seeking
the spots on the deck least freQuented aud
making no effort to form companionships.
A good straight year behind hotel coun-
ter for the sole purpose OF being talked at,
had placed me In prime condition to look,
listen and keep my mouth shut for q day.
Thus Il was that by the time the Mary
Powell had sighted the Highlands on the
down trip, everybody aboard. had prob
abiy N ade up their mind, II they thought
OF me ut all. that I was q gloomy, hope
less old duffsr not worth their ateOntioo.
That was the conclusion had drawn and
upon which was cOngrAtulating myself.
perb night, Isn't I.i"
Very hne," 1 responded, unconscIously,
the next instant upbrAiding myself for my
sociability. Then I turned TO realize that
the speaker was . mao OF perhaps thirty.
ANN O@As " 8ko NANA kOOA uk0EoN I9b0Dr
pleasing features and clothes OF the most
recent fashionable stuR and cut I had
intended to wither the intruder with 'the
expression OF my eye" but at the nrst
glance 1 became interested aud for several
minutes watched and studied my man
He INDUCED In . variety OF attitudes,
some picturesque and some otherwise, With
his whole attentiAn directed at the land
and waterscape ahead "Quser,"
thought as continued my scrutiny, ''buI
that mans face and Ayure belle an indo.
scribable something In his manner. Pos
Sibly the clothes and the dignity are nis.
placed"
"By the gods, sir" he resumed, sit 10 In
the presence OF such superb grandeur and
when inhaling the fullness Of such mag.
niacently pure air - this that feel my.
self puny combination Of flaws drifting
In vast and enhancing ocean OF perfec-
tions. Even now feel that ought in the
very superAbundance Of my admiration
for the Supreme Being, fy apart that each
OF the mill on defective atoms in my
makeup might mingle with tho undyins
purity Of this atmosphere In search Of re.
demption."
Il q not answer, but conte1ted myself
with the thoug G that the speaker was an
e'thusi - ic young scholastic whose mind
wa weighed i IVA by the theses OF his
next lecture be ore the stu Ie ats. As
studied hia face, howe .cr, l Iouu or Inn.
agine,i that folad IN .ro unuiistakaIIe
trac = OF wee an fic Glen ,ss. Just then ]
saw him plarea hu ;e picc, OF plus tobac-
CO between his teeth Hs evi ilsnce that my
suspicious were not without founda iou.
A laiy crossed the deck carryi yins n bale
In her arms, and my loquncious vis-a- Wis
remarked: els there anything more di-
vinelY beautiful than the sight OF q young
mother carrying her oR>p1nS I'm her
armsl Mark the atmosphere Of protection
which see us to enc rcle that pair by grace
o mothers d votiDn and the chiIPs
faith. IL Is such n s.ene as that which
ins. ircs mo With an all abs 'rlkng sen 80 OF
resPect AID d0votion for W .maa<ia q. -
Truly, thought TO myself this mta Is
n marvel Of nio frelin; anl gsutle Ia
stiucts aud LIST my self in n series OF
IN isin 8 IL which I WIS brous sht C. Le-
lief tat had surely misjudgod "Ihe mau
who ialkvL"
Tue steamboat had made its landing
aud "a the passengers were mIkiuy their
way to the wharf, observed that my un-
known com. anton salutsd the bog "a 20
transfer cent, with whom was well ac-
quaint IL The exchange OF courtesies
between two men evid ,ntly 50 wide apart
In station and acquirementS. prompted
me to ask tho name Of the man who had
shown such delicate and hno aPpr &C. Alton
of beautiful aud good things
THAT man with the stately walki" in
rasl n, Nrav az
That's tho man."
"why. he's the entry clerk In that big
laundry on Sixth avenue, corner Of -
street"
made no further inquiries, but as Irode
up on the Elevated" 1 found my friend
In the same car, and 1 noted that he
seemed deeply Interested in the copy oI
'The Philosopher and Friend" Just Issued.
Truly such . man was out OF place as a
clerk in . laundry, and his acquaintance
Is worth cultivating, was the conclusion
formed. And so q few days later, by vir-
tue Of my position AZ chief clerk in the
- House, 1 visited the laundry on Sixth
avenue ostensibly to negotiate for the
doing OF our table linen daily, but in reaI-
ity 20 renew the acquaintance Just hlnted
at on the boat
AS entered the laundry was shocked
beyond measure to hear q volley OF most
useless and foolish profanity, and as one
OF the laundry girls passed In tears from
che ofice TO the package room In the
rear discovered that the perpotrA-
ter OF the profanity was my steam.
boat companion He recognized me at
once and As though I had MT heard
AMI seen his eonI emptib exhibition OF
coarsoness and indecency. he addressed
me with the grace OF q Chesterfield and
the eloquence OF an IngersolL spoke OF
the hotel I represented, at which he be.
slobbered that establishment with ridic-
uiOus praise and talked Of the require
ments Of hotel clerk In such way that
SOon felt fool sh and found myself won.
dering whether, as the laundry clerk sAld.
showed In my face and manner wns
really an ideal hotel clerk Ny embar.
rassmeut was somewhat reliev. d when
the laundry clerk said: "Excuss ne for .
moment, SIR, but I hnd that the multifa-
rious details Of this homely business dc.
mand the most absolute and constant at.
tention. will return presently"
"who was that girl Wlo wett out CRY.
ingl" asked Of the young girl behind
the collars and cuts showcase
-She's his wife, SIR" ...
Does he often swear at her Hike thass''
Goodness me. that's nothing. siFl Voc
Just ought to hear him TO home That's
when he gifts right up and swears a her
and at oil Of uA rhea he svsass - 10
swearlngw
j. X. LINCoLN, WASH ADAMS.