davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
SsaE WILL Bss saaS MOCes n g.sN.
LAW.

Ouncl Buns Nonpareii.l
There is young man in this city, q
good looking young fellow, who has
sweetheart out in the country few miles,
and he spends two evenings every week
in her society. A few nights ago he
stayed to the usual hour, and as he passed
out the front door he discovered that it
was cloudy and dark. He did not relish
the idea of driving alone through the
gloomy night, and hinted about q good
deal to get sn invitation to remain, but it
was not forthcoming. But the young
man was equal TO the emergency. Going
down the steps he artfulIy contrived to
slip and tall gently to the ground.
ThereupOn he set up tremendous groan-
ing. The ruse worked admirably. The
girl screamed, the men folks jumped out
of bed aud carried the young man ten
derly into the house. His horse was put
up aud he was assisted to undress and de-
posted in the spare chamber. He had
hardly begun to chuckle over the success
when the girls mother put in an appear
ance, armed with mustard plaster foot
square and ten-horse drawing power.
This she Immediately proceeded to clap
on the small of the young mans back,
where he had incautiously located the
damage to his frame. For two mortal
hours that woman sat by the bed, and
was not satisfied till she beheld with her
own eye q blister an inch deep. The
young man is now reformed liar.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
COURTING A WIDOW.

There is any amount Of fun in courting
young girl who has not been used to it.
She swallows all the soft things a fellow
SAYS, but when it comes to popping the
question, or something of that kind, she
gets frightened more or less and wants
time to consider until there are enough
loopholes for her lover to slip out through
without the least bit of trouble, if he
happens to see some one he thinks he
could love shade or two better. Young
girls are timid and shy in earnest, and if
a fellow is not pretty certain he has
found precisely the angel he is looking
for, he can manage 80 as to have the
refusal of her for year or more, and at
the same time manage to keep his neck
out of the reach of a breach of promise
suit when he happens to meet some other
sweet.faced angel that seems to him to be
better suited to his taste.
1t is different with a widow. She gets
rid of all her shyness at the earliest con-
venient opportunity, and finds out the
principal things she desires to know of
him before she allows him to get ac-
quainted. The school girl of lG trusts
herself to any young fellow on sixty or
ninety days sight without security; but
the widow, like thrifty, wholesale
house, goes out and examines the mer-
camille reports concerning him, and then
sells to him on her own terms tor cash.
She has him sized up before he comes to
market, and when she looks as if she
were very artless creature, and fights
shy of him whenever he happeas to sit
little close to her on the sofa, there are
ten chances to one that he will never
look any further, but will buckle right
up to her and pnt the question fairly and
squaiely, and when he has done so she
is not going to trembIe and blush and
ask for a week or month in which to
make up her mind. She will just wind
her arms around his neck and look up
into his face without one of EllaWheeler's
fiery yearns, and before he has had time to
catch his breath he will find himself
nailed TO the cross with a "yes" that
pierces him to his very soal!
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

When the l34 young doctors of the
Bellevue Hospital College of New York
city received their diplomas, Andrew
Carnegie, who has given the college ESQ.,
900 to build laboratory, made an ad-
dress in which he said I: What bless
ing it is that you were not born wealthy.
You should be grateful to kind Provi.
dence for fathers and mothers who have
not burdened you with riches. The poor.
est father is the richest one. By be.
queathing the necessity to work, the poor
man leaves richer heritage to his con
than the millionaire can possible give his.
Poverty at the beginning Of Ne ID Z
positive blessing. You make no question
Of success there is none, because success
10 . necessity. Only the rich and pam
pered, who play at professions, fail in lifs
q class"
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
THE OLD FARMER WAS Right

A Republican the other day was seek
ing to twit Democrat, an old farmer ND
about Lucasville, about hard times, and
wanted to know if these were the good
times we we're to have under Democratic
rule. The old farmer listened 10 him
quietly, and finally remarked: sMy
friend, did you ever know q farmer, no
matter how thrifty, who could take .
farm that had been running down for
twenty-four years, and get . good crop
off of it inside of six months guess not.
1t takes some time to repair the fences,
improve and strengthen the soil, clear out
the weeds and briars and thistles, open up
the drains, bitches and water courses.
drive away the vermin and renovate the
farm and buildings generally. This is
just what the administration is doing now
putting the national farm in order.
Wait until we get the farm which the
Republicans have been letting run down
for years improved and in good condition
and then you will see some beautiful
crops the whole country will laugh with
rich harvests and the people will rejoice
in prosperity. My friend, the good times
are coming-wait little longer.-Ports-
mouth Times
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
OLD TIME COURTnNG.

Uncle Davy was giving the boys some
advice in their love-msking affairs, and one
of them asked him how the young people
did when he was sparkling. "Them was
great times, boys," he said in reply,
great times. We didn't have no gas,
nor no kerosene, nor no new-fangled no.
tions, and we done our sparkin' by plain
tallow dip; but most frequently just by
the freight. freight is warmin', boys,
and flickers just enough to make q girls
eyes shine and the peach blossom glow in
her cheeks. It's mighty soft and purity,
too, and kinder reaches out and melts two
hearts together in way none of your gas
lights know anything about. Sometimes
the FIRE shined up q little too powerful in
places, and the young man would git up,
without sayin' anything, and put a show
elful of ashes on it. Then he would cud-
die up to the girl in the shadows and she
would cuddle some too, and it really
didn't seem like there was anything else
in the whole big round earth to be wished
for. Purity soon the fire would git OBJ
streperous again, and the little flames
would twinkle in and out, AZ if they
wanted to see what was goin' on, or had
seen and was laughin' and winkin' about
it and havin' some fun too, and the young
fellow would reach for the shovel and the
ashes and cover the bright blazes all up.
And sometimes-remember, now, only
sometimes-the girl would get up and
put ashes on, and then-well, boys, when
the bluebirds come in the spring, aud the
fshin' worms crawled ont Of the ground
and the boys set on the green banks o.
the little creek waitin' for . bite, and the
Johnny jump ups nestled in the sunny
places, there was weddin' In the old
house, and the purity bride wore apple
blossoms in her hair, and the awkward
| young fellow blushed in his store clothe,
and tight boots; and when the winte
come again they sst BY their own fire, ant
| the shovel and the ashes was ont Of Job.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

A Fathers Last Words" You've
Always Been - GOOd B"y DO Me-
IL have little story to tell You, boys
the old doctor said to the young people
the other evening. "One day-a long,
hot day it had been, tool met my father
on the road to town.
"' / wish you would take this package
to the village for me, Jim,' he said, hesi-
tating.
"Now, 1 was boy of twelve, not fond
of work, and was just out of the hay-6eld,
where / had been at work since daybreak
l was tired, dusty and hungry. 1t was
two miles into town. wanted to get
my supper and wash and dress for sing
ing school.
"My first impulse was to refuse, and to
do it harshly, for ! was vexed that he
should ask this of me after my long days
work. If did refuse, he would 60 him
self. He was a gentle, patient old man.
But something stopped me; one of Gods
good angels, think.
:" Of course, father, I'll take it, said
heartily, giving my scythe to one of the
men. He gave me the package
Thank you, Jim, he said. Il was
going myself, but somehow l don't feel
very strong to-day
ole walked with me to the road that
turned off to the town, and, rs he left,
put his hand on my arm, saying again /;
Thank you, my son. You've always
been a good boy to me, Jim.'
81 hurried into town and back again.
When came near the house saw q
crowd of farm hands at the door. One of
them came to me, the tears rolling down
his face.
"Your father he said, fell dead just
as he reached the house. The last words
he spoke were to you.'
Pm an old man now, but l have
thanked God over an over again in all
the years that have passed since. that
hour that those last words were !:
You've always been good boy to
me-"
No human being ever yet was sorry for
love or kindness shown to others. But
there is no pang of remorse so keen as
the bitterness with which we remember
neglect or coldness which we have shown
to loved ones who are dead.
Do not begrudge loving deeds and kind
words, especially to those who gather
with you about the same hearth. In
many families q habit of nagging, cross
ness, or ill-natured gibing, gradually Gov
ers the real feeling Of love that lies deep
beneath.
And after all it is such little way that
we can 90 together.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

One would naturally suppose that the
care of children would be the frst
thought of the parents, whereas in many
cases it seems as II the FIRST thought were
rather to escape that burdsn-although
the responsibility may never be- shirked
without penalty-delegating it TO hired
and Indifferent hands and heads, often ig-
norant, often incompetent, without re-
Aecting that it demands not only the love
and tenderness such as no alien can furn-
ish, but that the wisest mind ID not too
wise for the task, nor the most cultured
intellect too we'll trained or too brilliant
70 cope with the subject, to ct the human
soul for its sphere and its work, for the
development of its transoendent powers.
The person who on engaging nursery
maid remarked, by way Of preface that
neither he nor his wife knew anything
about the care of children, nor did they
wish to know" onlyfrankly acknowledged
the deplorable condition Of mind of many,
and certainly had no business to have the
bright faces of children about his hearth.
One wonders il he treated any other of
his possessions with such unconcern.
Those who regard their children as their
chief occupation in life, and who love that
occupation, can hardly understand the
state of mind OF mothers who accept every
excuse for turning them off upon whoever
will take the charge, careless of the dan
gers they may meet from the unguarded
and untaught speech of servants or ganin
mothers who love their own ease and
pleasure better than the souls of their
sons and daughters, who find no delight
in watching the unfolding of a human in
tellect, and whose minds are too narrow
to appreciate the seli-abnegation of wiser
mothers, whom they regard as slow spec-
mems of the Face of women, old fogies with
domestic proclivities too strongly devel-
oped, beings without thought or aspira-
tion beyond the clean faces and clothes Of
their brood, without proper sense of the
sphere of woman, which in their view
seems to consist merely in dressing and
gossiping, fattering and being fattered
by the other sex. People take infinite
care of their homes, their land, their
clothes, but they too often leave their
children, their most valuable possessions,
upon whose welfare the progress of the
race depends, to take care of themselves,
unaware or needless of the great interest
at stake, and deaf to all admonitious. A
child's mind is plastic, ready to receive
every or any impression, and it is the pa
rents who have the power to dictate what
these impressions shall be. When child
learns lying and thieving or any evil, it is
generally the father and mother who de-
serve the punishment for those offenses.
They received the precious gift of an un-
tutored mind into their keeping, and if
they have neglected it, have chosen to
waste their energies on lesser themes, on
the vanities of the world and the flesh, not
to mention the devil, they have sown the
wind and will reap the whirlwind.-Har-
1er's B0z0r
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17


1n the cosrss of theaebtful article
about the blessings which nnmbsslsss Ia
Dor saving appliances are confsrring on
the masculine half uf humanity. the Wal
than Free Press asks, But how shout
the wives ?" aud continuss:
ave hear men talk about the work
their grandmothers did. - though the
women of the present day did nothing.
Bless you, gentlemen, the wives Of nine
out Of ten laboring men work more hours
per day than you do, and do Ear more
than your grandmothers thought Of doing
or could have done. The trouble 10 they
are doing too much. They become old
when the bloom Of youth should still be
upon them. They go TO bed tired and
wake up the next morning TO get your
breakfast unrefreshed."
Our WaItham contemporary does not
overstate the case, and it need not have
restricted its remarks to the condition of
the wives OF lahoring men. Women sin
good circumstances "--deceptive termi-
are to-day caring for large honses, where
as their grandmothers lived in Iitale cot
tages; their children, trained TO other
work, allow mothers to be the slaves of
incompetent servants; yet % the lady of
the house " is expected to be always
ready to receive calls or company.
How about the wives ?" is indeed q
timely question.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
A CAMPAIGN SECRET GIVEN

In the campaign of 1884 the two can.
didates for Governor in . "pivotal
Western State arraigned for . series oi
joint discussions. Both men were popu.
lar, both of fine appearance and were 30
we'll matched 10 mental force and u
orators that the contest bet tween them
promised to be magnificent one. Fol-
several weeks the scales balanced evenly.
But one day the brilliant Republican
candidate came up ailing. He seemed
overcome and spoke laboredly. The next
day he was even less effective. Later be
was compelled to ask bis opponent for q
postponement of certain appointments,
which was granted. Before the cam
paign ended he had abandoned the field
altogether.
Meantime the Democratic candidate
continued his canvass, seeming to grow
stronger, cheerier and more effective
with each succeeding week. He was
elected. One evening in December while
entertaining several gentlemen he said:
II will tell you q campaign secret
which gave me the election. With the
opening of my campaign began caring
for my liver. l knew that disordered
or, torpid liver meant dullness and posi-.
BILE sickness. l took something every
day. When my opponent began failing
l knew bis trouble to be his liver and
felt like prescribing for him, but feared
If did so he might beat me! grew
stronger as the campaign progressed,
often making two speeches day. Even
my voice, to my surprise, did not fail me
once. All because Warmers Safe Cure
kept me in A trim" Ex Governor
Jacob, of Kentucky, also made cam
paign tour under precisely the same cir
cumstances, and says he kept up under
the exhausting strain by use Of the same
means - Rnchesfpr Na;on
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
WE WE'RE CHILDREN ONCE OUR.
SELVES.

One by one the white hairs glisten,
One by one the wrinkles come;
AND the times, too, with their advent,
When we love quiet home.
when the patter and the frolic
Of our little household elves
Made US quite forget, my neighbor,
We were children once ourselves.
Once We felt the young blood tiugle
All along our youthful veins,
as we roamed the fields and meadows,
Sped the ball, or held the reins
Aye, SO full of JOY and gladness
We're our hearts In life's young day,
That we only saw the roses
While the thOrns were hid away
Well, ah, well, should we remember
How we loved the cherry song
vi the merry, merry skaters
AS We mingled with the throng
now we loved the dear home frolics,
Blind Mans Buff" aud "Busy Bee"
Or the quiet games Mt evening,
Mother looking on to see!
Dear old days of happy childhood,
Full of JOY, with little pain
They are gone, and though we miss them
They will neer return again.
Let us then, though growing older
Like the books upon our shelves,
Ne'er forget, my friend and neighbor,
We were children once ourselves.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

"A member of the Wisconsin Dairy
mems Association has been making ex-
neriments to test the value Of corn-fodder,
which has matured a crop Of corn, in COM
parison with hay. He found two pounds
Of stalk equal in feeding value to one
pound of hay. The corn yielded fifty
bushels of shelled corn and one and three
quarter tons of cured corn stalks, nearly
euual in value to ton Of hay. His ex-
periments were in feeding the stalks un-
cot. and he estimated the waste at forty
DER cent II they had been finely cut the
waste would have been much less. He
states that enough corn-stalks are wasted
n lis State annually to keep all the four
footed animals without the use Of hay.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
FROM A sErsE OF DUTY.

Some people shrink from making pub
lie the benefit they have received, while
others are free TO tell it abroad for the
good of fellow mortsls. OF the lstter
Kind 10 Mr.. J. Fl. Coppuck, of Mount
Holly, N. j., who writes. | am one Of
many who give their cheerful apprecia-
tion of the merits Of the efficacy Of your
valuable Browns Iron Bittsrs. from =
sense of duty. This bitters il doing
much good in our county, for which ]
can youch."
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

"You say your husband has q good
memory, do you, Mrs. Crimsonbeak p
"Oh, excellentr' responded the lady
addressed.
"And how do you know it is so very
good ?"
swell, / asked him to bring me home q
mackerel a week ago, aud be brought it
home to-day. Now, man must have q
pretty good memory to remember little
thing like that for whole week.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

-"How old are you, my little man?" in
quired gentleman of youngster of three
years to whom he was being introduced.
"Pm not old at ALL" replied the little
man; Z" / am almost new"
1t may not generally be known that
the English walnut is the most profitable
of all the nut-bearing trees. When in
full bearing they viii yield about 500
pounds of nuts to the tree. IL only
twenty-seven trees are planted on an
acre, says . Los Angeles orchardist,
the income would be $54e per acre.
or from twenty acres, $l0,sso per
year.
Every owner of horse should cut
this, "The Horses Petition out and
paste it up in his barn, - . reminder:
Going up hill, Whip me not,
Going down hill, Hurry me NOT.
On level ruad, Spare me not,
Loose In the stall, Forget me not,
OF hay and corn, Rub me NOT,
Ofclean water, Stint me moi.
Ofsoft dry bed, Deprive me not.
Tired or NOT, Wash me not,
Ii sick or cold, Chill me not
With sponge aud brush, Neglect me not,
With bits or reins, On, jerk me moi,
And when you are angry Strike me NOT.
-" Your beau seems very bashful. -
said Dayton Avenue. mamma to her
daughter. Bashful I" echoed the dangh-
ter, bashfuls no name for it.n sWhy
don't you encourage him little more ?
Some men have TO be taught how to do
their courting. He's good catch. !"
:. Encourage him r. said the daughter !;
she cannos take the most palpable hink.
Why, only last night, whes / sat ali alone
on the sofa. and be perchsd up II chair
| - far away - be o0uld gst asked him
il Ne didat think il seraags that ! manss
arm and woman's waist seemed always to
be Of the same length, and what do YOU
think he did r Why, just Whist any
sensible man would have done- -trisd i. =
He asksd me- Il could fnd pieoe OF
| striag - 70 coald msasnse and - IL il
was 60. Amt be hoFrid"
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

"A scientist has .und that woman's
ear can perceive higher notes than :
mana This il the reason Why the wo-
man slways wakes up 6rst when the
baby cries q night
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
Two Millions

of acres Of Farming, Orange,
Timber and Grazing Lands,
situated in 20 counties, and
comprising the lands bought
by Sir Edward ]. Reed, from
the State of Florida in 1881,
are now offered at graded
prices. These lands were Sc
lected by Hon. Hugh A. Cor
ley, late Commissioner of the
State Land Office, and Mr..
M. A. Williams, late agent for
sale of State lands, which fact
is a guaranty of their high
quality. The purchase known
as the Reed Purchase was only
opened for sale this year. and
the lands have not been culled
or picked over. No part has
been reserved in any manner,
and the whole is open for sale.
Special prices on large tracts.
Timber lands, virgin forests in
bodies of $4,000 acres and up
wards. Lands sold for cash,
or on long time.
The Florida Land and Mortgage Go
(LrMrrED) JACKSONVILLE, FL0RiD"
Oct. z. 16S4-1y
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
BOTTLED ADVERTISING.

1t has been demonstrate that bottled adver
ing is superior to any and all modes
We have adopted the plan of placing the bulk OF
our advertising INSIDE OF the bottle and corking
ii up, while Others do all their work on the out
side.
That is the reason that b b. b. proves so valua-
bic in the cure of all blood diseases Scrofulous
Swellngs and Sores, Rheumatism, Catarrh Skin
and Kidney affections. Merit is in the bottle and
the patient is at once convinced of the fact
Large bottles 81, three for $3.50. Address Blood
Balm Co, Atlanta, Ga.
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17
B. B. B.

j. N. Ellis, Atlanta, Ga, writes: have had a
severe form OF Eczema Ten years, and have failed
to secure relief from various doctors, and about
14O bottles OF noted remedy It was pronounced
incurable, but the use of B. B. Il. has effected a
cure, and refer to DIR. ID. o. c. Heery, DIR. F. F.
Taber, Atlanta, GA.
W. NJ. Cheshire, at W. II. BrothcrtOn's store,
Atlanta, writes : " have had large eating ulcer
on my leg cured by the use Of b. B. b.
II ia decidedly most wonderful medicine for
the cure OF blood diseases, and it will please
everybody.
NASHVILLE, Tenn, Nov. g, 1884.
One Of my customers. Mrs. l.. Williams, has
been using b. B. b. short time and reported to
me that its effects simply marvellous. and
that it far surpasses all other blood remedies she
has used, and that she could heartily sanction
anything said in its favor. it had given her
more relief than anything she had ever used be-
fore. W. ii. OWEN, Druggist.
A 32-page book filed with Information about
your blood. your skin, Kidneys. rheumatism, Old
Ulcers and Sores. Blood poisons etc, mailed free
to anyone. Address
BLOOD BALM co, Atlanta Ga.
WF For sale by W. A. RAWLS and NJ. LIVELY.
September 10 -1m-2I ly
The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1885-09-17

--~ \. one lnrh ia space "a squAres HIKE . COZ
isS' .-.isemrp,s inserted icsr than month, 81
a~n' " 70, first and 30 cents for each subsequent
iH-f". ,.oments unaccompsnied by the CASH. except
contract will not receive attention.
'auu money enclosed does not cover the number OF
ordered II will I've inserted q less number oi
...,;..mepis not marked with the number OF times
;...cd until forbid, and charged accordingly.
~ .,rsc, advertisers whose amount Of space and
=, time are fxed by above raier, will be required
their advertising strictly to their own business
,,,s.s otherwise stipulated
two copies only OF the paper will be sent to
Y.,,.c-. unless special agreement TO the contrary
nh;,,,,,e- exceeding tour lines will be charged same