The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1885-06-24
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

"a piece of lemon bound upon corn
will cure it." A sort of lemon-aid, as
it were.- Graphic.
Domestic pursuits-Chasing the man
of the house with a broomstick. Bur
LingtOn Free Press
There is only one thing sadder than
death, and that is seat in theatre be-
hind four story hat -Bo ton Post.
1t is impossible for leopards to escape
when once in confinement, for they are
always "spottcd. - Merchant TTaOeter.
eyes" said the dudeling, as he
gathered himself up, 'the hardest thing
about roller skating is the floor. Life.
The skating rinks should make deal
of money. The patrons come down
handsomely every night. Boston Tran
script.
There are certain social grades in
every rank of life Even the poor fisher
man is obliged to draw the line some
where. Boston Courier.
GAN is not gold that glitters, f" OBJ
served the philosopher, just after he had
absent-mindedly picked up red-hot
horse shoe. .-LOaoeU Citizen.
"Man is born to rule the world, f" says
philosopher. Woman is born to rule
man. No philosopher says this, but it
is fact nevertheless. - Graphic.
1t is much harder work for man to
care for his children an hour and half
while his wife is at church than to run
fox all day Waterloo ObcerDer.
A Southern woman has in use roll
ing-pin bought when she was married
sixty.one years ago. Her husband has
evidently behaved himself Call.
ga talking machine has just been in
vented in Vienna" says an exchange.
The dickens you say! Why, we married
one ten years ago !-Nepman Independent.
Clear down to vegetation's roots
The solar warmth now reaches,
And girls are trimming bathing suits
Boston Courier.
An exchange says How shall we
prevent mice from gnawing the bark off
fruit trees ~ Kill the mice, of course.
A dead mouse never gnaws bark
Graphic.
1t is scientifically estimated that if all
tho champion" roller skaters in Ameri-
ca should stand up in row, there
wouldn't be people enough left to count
them. .-SdoannGh Neaos.
Now the faithful funny writer
'Mong the dust of ages pokes,
For the summers work preparing
Resurrecting baseball jokes.
st. Paul Herald.
When the man told his landlady she
fed him wooden biscuits, she didn't get
mad, oh, no, she smiled and
told him board was so cheap that-but
the story is too sad to conclude. -Aer-
chant 7raUeler.
A New York circus is advertising for
the second year a sacred white elephant.
An animal that can keep the company
of circus men for year and remain sa-
cred must certainly be a curiosity worth
crawling under the tent to see.-States-
man.
There was a man in Norristown,
And he was very tall;
He went into the skating rink
And got heavy fall.
And when he found himself laughed at,
w ith ali his might and main
He quickly sprang upon his feet
And fell right down again.
-Norristown Herald
The other day Newark physician,
who suspected that some one was peep
ing through the keyhole of his Office
door, investigated with a syringe full of
pepper sauce. lie found his wife, half
an hour afterward, with handage over
her left optic She told him that she
had beeu cutting wood and chip had
hit her in the eve Co2Tier- Journal.
BOARDING HOUSE ANGEL.
Tall and slender
Aud dressed in blue,
A fairer creature
/ never knew
Her golden tresses
A lustre shed.
And, lise an aureOla,
Crown her hoad.