The Abilene reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1883-1888, 1885-06-04
"a LITTLE NONSENSE"
Tommy. did YOU hear your mother

Tommy, did you hear your mother
call you?'' Counsel did" Then,
why don't you 90 to her at once?"
well, YOU see, she's nervous, and it'd
shock her awful if l should 90 too sud-
den. ''-L0uisriye Courier-J0UrnaI.
Small Gertrude Give years old)-
Mamma, l quite agree with you"
Mamma-"Why, my child. what does
agree mean?" 5. G.-.'When two per-
sons think alike" Mamma-"What
does disagree mean" S. G.-"When
one person thinks alike. Life.
IAN Illinois junk-dealer recently
bought a load of scrap-iron which con-
tanned a pocketbook with one thous-
and six hundred dollars in it for
a song" says an exchange. If this
is the case he had better abandon the
scrap-iron business and adopt vOcalism
for a professionally. Y. Graphic.
Colonel Jim Bowie's famous dag
ger, which served him in many COM
bat and was the pattern of subsequent
bowie knives" is On exhibition at
New Orleans. 1t is a double-edged
weapon, with a horn handle and Il
curved blade fifteen inches long and an
inch and a half wide at the hilt.-N q.
PicdyVRe.
At the Police Court: Accused.
you are blind?''. Yes. your honor"
How did YOU become blind?' ''By a
fit of apoplexy" ''Why, then this
picture on your breast representing an
explosion in a mine, in which you
lost your sight?" please your Honor.
because to represent apopleXy painting
is pOwerlesS. lie FrdncaiS.
He writes:
Last night left my heart with you,
4 captive to your winning grace;
AS you have one that's kind and true,
Pray send me yours to take its place.
She answers:
If you have left your heart with me,
can't say l regret it;
And "a for minc-weil let me see
Call round tonight and get it.
--BOStOn Courier.
Have another piece of cake said
Johnnys mother to female friend
who was taking dinner with her. No.
don't you do it, put in Johnny; cit II
make YOU sick why, Johnny, ain,
YOU ashamed of yourself to talk that
way?' well, mother, that's what
YOU always tell me when | want
another piece, and | bet | can get
away with four times as much as Mrs.
Green can. '-KentucLg State Journal.
PA, what do people mean when
they say anything is a drug in the mar
kct?" asked young Johnny McSwilli-
gen of his pa. They mean, my son,
that the articles are plentiful and can
be bought cheap. But drugs can't be
bought cheap" persisted the boy.
That's So" said the father, tapping
his boy on the shoulder, IA wonderful
future is before YOU. | should not be
surprised if YOU became a newspaper
paragraphist. oil city Derrick.
You are doing nicely" said the
doctor encouraginglv to an old darby
patient: Il will call again tomorrow
and will leave YOU this prescription
now to save you from pain in the in
terim." Then he went out. ''Da's or
'Scription dat de doctah LEI" said the
patient feebly to his wife, IAN | wan ;
yo' ter 90 to de drug sto' an git it
filed. Tell de drug sto' man dat it,
70 my interim, an be sho' an AK him
! ef Ise ter. take it eternally, or jess rub
it on the outside, an eff SO wha'. ~.
/. Times,
"A student, undergoing eXamina-
ton in the principles of mechanics,
was asked. "Whv will not a pin stand
on its poiGt?" He returned the follow
ing answer: In the first place 4 point
is defined by Euclid rs that which hath
10 parts and no magnitude, and how
can pin stand on that which hath no
parts and no magnitude? In the Sec
ond place. a pin will not stand on Its
head, much less. therefore, Wilt stand
on its point. Thirdly and lastly, it will
if YOU stick it III hard enough.-N. Y.
independent