The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-04-25

forehead, and turnip flew past hls head.
 Peters, ;he=esrcs, slipped cut-to ex. plain to the crowd, who after some delay finally dispersed, greatly to Mrs. Bur rows relief
 "And now" said Burrows with the look of a martyr on the way to the stake, "give me the paper r
 His wife obeyed, and as he glanced over its columns, the heading first at- tracted his attention.
 Good heavens P he yelled, holding up the paper and pointing ts the words "Rpersville CGri0s," in big ornamental letters.
 "I-l don't know, Pm sure" quavered Mrs. Burrows, nervously. "L must have fallen out-the L. l mean"
 Burrows set his teeth, and glanced at the editorial.
 "' The Cloverton Eagk is the feol oi an unscrofulous partyP Fooli Itough, to have been tool-tool of an unscrupu- lous party" said Burrows, with bitter emphasis. and contisued:
 |" We pay no attention to the lying utterances of the almost defunct Eagle dying utterances. Now 1 know wha, the scoundrel meant in assaultiag me but he shall answer for it yetl'
 Then he turned the page and read on at random.
 G. For sale, 500 punches of cats I Why, what on earth does this mean?"
 "Oats, dear; bushels of oats," said his wife, deprecatingly.
 "Humphl Brilliant Affair! Bull at Drunkard's Hall' Ball at DrinkaId's, suppose you meant"
 "' Miss P. wore trailing rope-'"
 "Robe interrupted Mrs. B, eagerly.
 "' Looped with clusters of pars- nips-'"
 "Primroses 1 can't imagine how that could have slipped in," said poor Ms. B,
 "'M Miss L. was simply attired in a shor'
 Skirt-skit p cried Mrs. B. in an az. onized tone.
 "' Displaying a pair of queer Aano skippers-'"
 "Queen Anne slippers"
 "' And cardinal red nose-'"
 Hose-hosel Oh, my goodness They'll never forgive me-never!" said Mrs. Burrows, in such evident distress that her husband grimly turned the sheet
 "' Skreech of Hon. Fudge Buncomb. Is this Judge Buncombe's speech2 Very good. Let's see what he says. Our frs, duty as Africans (that should have been Americans) is the preservation of the Sacred Onion.'"
 Union, dear," said Mrs. B, feebly.
 " Doctor and Mrs. Marvel propose to give pig pasty on occasion of their ap- preaching silver wedding A pasty-a pig pastyl Why, thought it was to be big party"
 "Yes," said his wife, meeklY, and Mrs Marvel went into fit when she read it."
 "Shouldn't wonder"
 His wife wept silently.
 (" Country sausages made from corn fed dogs"
 Hogs" corrected Mrs. B. Cts Hooper, the butcher, and it was he threw the egg"
 "Net surprising. Here's the Sabbath school celebration. 'The children united in sweetly singing:
 "Wow doth teh little Dusy Hee. What does that mean7 Were they Dutch or Choctaw?"
 "There knew you'd pick out thas, because it's just the worst thing in the paper" said Ms. Burrows, in deeply grieved and injured tone. "The type all got upside down and wong side out, but it ought to have been
 How doth the little busy bee.'"
 |" It ought to have been, but it isn't" responded Burrows, bitterly. "And here's the select poetry corner. Let's see what you've made of this.
 The Shads of Might were pulling past
 When through an Alfred Collage passed A Goth who wore mid snsw and ice
 A Bonnet with the strong device,
 Elyxir' Thunder l" cried Burrows, starting up and dashing the paper on the floor. "Thunder and Je-ru-sa- lem P
 "I-I did it for the best" sobbed Mrs. Burrows, hys;erically. "I-I thought you would be pleased and proud"
 "Pleased!" exclaimed the editor, sav- agely. Pleased and proudl Hap
 But then, gazing down upon his weep ing wife, his features softened.
 He took his hat and walked toward the door.
 "Where are you going, Aristidesf" cried Mrs. Burrows, with some vague idea of suicide floating through her mind.
 ITO work on to-morrow's Clarion. 1 shall explain to the public, of course. l lay the whole of this responsibility where it rightly belongs-on Flowers"
 "To-be-sure !" said his wife, looking up hopefully.
 "l make no question but that the viii lain has gone to the Eagle office. where he knows that they need a compositor, and ] shall more than hint my suspicious of his having been sent here purposely to irjure the Clarion"
 "No doubt of it," said Mrs. B., triumphandy. "And you won't mention, Aristides, dear, that had anything to do with it ?"
 Certainly not," he returned grimly. And since that day Mrs. Burrows has never spoken of running the Clarion in case of anything happening to Aristides."
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