The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-09-19
POSTPONED.


Ratchet, but Mrs. PounCer and Mr.
Ratchet. and she was Il widow; and
when she came to me In II carriage
hired, but still with a man in livery
driving it-and said TO me:
ooh, Mrs Kimberly, ma'am, it's not
the expense I'm thinking of, for terms
don't affect me much-poor, dear Mr..
Pounccr was so very thoughtful of me
in his will, but should you be able to
promise me the comforts of home?"
And her dress was the richest of
silk, and all covered with English Grape,
and her veil, with a hem yard deep,
and really ] was so touched that |
promised her my best front room with
the alcovc, whether any one else wanted
it or not. And she lived in retirement
and had her meals in her own room for
two weeks, for reason that she con
tdcd to me. She was going to the den
lists and they were full set, and of
the bcautifulcst whiteness, like snow;
but at first you know, you can cant
talk in EN-, much less cat, and that
makes II incOnvenicnt.
AT the sclf-same moment, so to speak,
Mr.. Ratchet came to the house, and
ii was the most remarkable coincidence,
he confded in me too. He was a-going
to the dentist, likewise, and his was a
full set ; and he said hc'd like to be spoke
of and charged as an invalid for
month, which was done.
And all would have been private and
unknown but for my grandson Tommy,
that | have the bringing up of; and
how he found ii out don't know, but
he did, and told it to all the boarders
in the parlor one evening, and was cor
rected with my slipper and sent to bed
| in consequence.
But Mr.. Ratchet he never knew, and
| Mrs Pouncer She never guesscd-and
we must all come TO ii some time; and
some of us had I've no doubt And
| it didn't matter much, after ALL And
| what do you believe those two did
widow and widowcr-but fall in love
| with each other, at least as much as
| their age and size could be expected.
| He waited on her to church, and she
knitted him worstcd mulllcrs, and he
used to read something that he called
| poetry, and that was sOlcmner than the
! prayer book, of mornings in the par
lor-keeping it from being busted and
making her cape dreadful, poor thing!
But men are inConSideratc, whether
married or single; and women will put
up with n great deal before the we'd
ding-ring is on. Likewise he took her
to lectures, where | am told she went
to sleep, poor dear!
She liked fun, and good eating and
dancing, even at her size and he
liked horrid solemn things, and had
way of talking, as if you didn' have
ideas nobody else could understand
you hadn't any at all.
But widows mostly will get married,
if they can, poor dears, though you
can help wondering sometimes that
they haven't had sufficient warning.
Well, he proposed, of course, and
she accepted and she was to be mar
ried in lavender with white lace
hounces and fchu and he gave her
another diamond ring, though there
wasn't any room to speak of for it on
her fat finger, she had so many al,
ready and they were to be married
morning and Monday night all was
right and Tuesday morning the dread
full things began to happen.
Sally, the chambermaid comes to me,
and says she:
Oll, lhIS. hlllDtIlN, lutlt Is SDlllC-
thing the matter with Mrs, Pouncer
She's a-moining drcadfully in her own
room, and wants to see you.
So | run up stairs as fast as | could,
though the stOrc-ClOset was unlocked
and if the cook helped herself to Il
lump she took pound of sugar-as
know she would. And there | found
the poor dear a-crying in bed, and she
says: Lock the door, Mrs. Kimberly"
in queer kind of voice, and then she
showed me what had happened. She
always took her teeth out of nights and
put 'cm in bowl of water, and some
one had come inflow, she couldn' t
think, for though the window was
open who could climb up the wiseria
vine but n monkey?-And they were
gone. "And under my door this cruel
letter, Mrs. Kimberly" said she; and
she pointed TO one lying on the bed.
Read it, says she. So | opened the
htter and read:
DEAREST CAROLINE: Circumstances that
/ cannot explain force me to fly from this
roof. How long shall be gone / do not
know. 1t depends on another, Believe
me true, and trust me If you can. have
no hope but in your complete faith in me,
Yours, EDWARD.
1.-TWO such blows in one morning,
says she, land the clergyman coming
and all OF course, under any circum-
stances, ! couldn't be bride until
had new set, but | could have said |
was i'll, But what is ii? Is it first
wife? Can it be p
"Hc doesn't look il, says |.
"rhcre's no judging by looks" said
she. Maybe he's found out about
my teeth and gone
THAT amt likely" said I; "he'd
have more sympathy But | didn't
like to say why.
Hes man." said the willow,
CHATS enough. But it's an awful
mystery
"Perhaps your teeth were never put
in the water" said |, Maybe they re
on the floor.
And pcepcd around and pretty
soon | saw on the side of the bowl five
little black marks, and on the window
sill were five more, and then five more
yet,
Then ! began TO guess, | went out
into Mr., Ratchct's room, and ON the
window from the back piazza, there
were five more black marks and on
the bureau was Il goblet of water ant
on that five black marks more.
] knew all now, My grandson
Tommy, was fine child but he haC
one popularity. The more ! washc,
his hands the blacker they got An,
whatever he touched he printed of hi
hands ON.
lie was capable of climbing TIM
wistora vine, and he liked to tease
, lie had lively disposition, poor, dea
Tommy, and he had taken the teeth o.
both double sets-just as he had m.
spcctaclcs before church time. An
once he put his poor Uncle Primer
wooden leg up the chimney when h
| NNns lrlnmrnnhnl for In N hnrrN snmn