Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-09-23
BILL NYE AS A j. p.
..oA Anecdotes that Fit Almost Any
where,

araa Anecdotes that FAT Almosk any
where.
Tho Justice of the Peace is sometimes
,oculiaritv, and if come one does not
Itch him ne will exceed his jurisdiction.
- took constable, a Sheriff, a prosecut-
49,. attorney and club to convince a
wyoming Justice OF tie Peace that he had
.oriobt to send a man to the peniteutla-
-. 6,r life. Another Justice in Utah SEN
,.,.,od q criminal to be hung on the FOL
,,.,ing Friday, between l. and O'Clock
- Sand dav, but ne couldn't enforce the
.artonce. A Wisconsin Justice of the
30 Granted divorce and in Two weeks
o.ried the couple over again-$lO for
tho divorce and 81 for the relapse.
.rothar one. when his first case came
-erFed n candle box around behind
NJ dininp-rooIn table. put his hat on the
i'a.l- ot his head, borrowed II cheW OF TO-
h@..o from the prisoner ana sald;
0..Noy. boys, the courts open. The
s..4 ,oIlnr that SAYS word unless speak
~ HIM win get paralized. Now, tell your
Stotcn each witness and the defendant
Ii of his warn without being sworn.
Tho Justice fined the defendant $40 and
n'sdpthe complaining witness pay nalt the
costs The Justice then took the me ana
Cntif i'm his pocket, adjourned court, and
on hour was so full thatit took six men
tnbord bis house still long enough for him
to get into the doors.
north Park Justice Of the Peace and
rnder sheriff formed partnership years
n Sgo for the purpose of supplying people
vim Justice at New I ork prices, and by
n dorgA strictly cash business they dis
rensed with a good deal OF justice, such
US II was. - 4. ~, ..u,-,. 49,,
ohm IN ont of the State, and as there was
a GOOD deal killed there, consisting OF
'It antelope and black tail deer especial
& " and as il could not be hauled out Of the
r,qre AT that season without going across
tEe wyoming line and back again into
tra state OF Colorado, the under Sheriff
would load himself down with warrants,
sirnpn in blank, and station himself on
horseback at the foot OF the pass to the
north He would then arrest everybody
unfortunately who had any fraction OF
a Geer. antelope OF elk on his wagon, try
the case then and there, put on fine of
81 SO to so. which, If paid, never reached
the treasury, and then he would wait Tor
81 another victim. The average man would
& rather pay the fine than go back a hun
81 dr4d miles through the mountains to
stand trial so the under Sheriff and JUS
81 tce thriVed for some time. But one day
Al the under Sheriff served his patent auto
matte warrant on young man who re-
fused to come down. The officer then
drew one Of those large baritone intru
ments thar generally has coward at one
end and q corpse At the other. He point
ed this at the young man and assessed
dne Of $50 and costs. Instead of paying
this fine. the youth, who was quite MINI
bic, but unarmed, knocked the bogus Off
Ger down with the butt end of his six
mile whip. took his self-cocking creden-
tails away, and lit out. In less than a
week the Justice and his copper were in
the refrigerator.
was once Justice of the Peace, and
good many funny little incidents oc-
cured while / held that office. | do not
Rllude to my official life here in order to
call attention to my glowing career, for
thousands of others no doubt could have
administered the affairs Of the Office as
well as did, but rather to speak of one
incident which took place while was
J.P.
One night after had retired and gone
10 sleepa milkman called Bill Cunning
rang the main bell and got me out of bed.
Then he told me that a man who owed
him milk bill OF $50 was all loaded up
and prepared 10 slip across the line over
land into Colorado, there to grow up with
The country and acquire other indebted
ness no doubt. Bill desired an attach
ment TOR the entire wagon load of goods
and said he had an officer at hand TO serve
the writ
But said I, as [ wrapped a "wel-
come musk doOrmat around my glorious
proportions, chow do you know while we
converse together he is not winging his
way down the valley Of the PardeeW
"Neyer mind that, Jedge," says Will
Hams you just fix the dockyments ana
I'll tend to the defendant"
In an hour Bill returned with $50 in
cash for himself and the entire costs Of
the court, and as we settled up and fixed
the docket | asked Bill Dunning how he
detained the defendant while he made
out the affidavit bond and writ of attach
ment.
you reckOlleet, Jedge," says Will
nam. that the Vaughn wheel is held onto
The exile with q big nut. No waggIn kin
20 any length of time without that there
nut onto the exile. Well, when l diskiv-
eled mat what's his name was packed up
ana the waggin loaded, took the liberty
20 uorry one o them there nuts fur kind
9 moment0, as 1t were, and j kept that
n ny pocket ill we served the writ and
De paid nay bill and came 10 his milk, If
1eetl allow me that expression, and then
lsRys tohm:
HaHner,' says !, you are goin' far,
l'i away where l may never see you
o-A,n' rake this here NUT says |, and
Ht ~ onto the exile OF the oft hind wheel
your Vaughn, and whenever you look at
y h'Ieaiter, think O poor old Bill Dun
M mug. The mill,rnau -