The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1885-06-19

Ihey bnilded better than they kucwn
W. go.ls sh!cture-our fair land;
"" I'm mq %'i'a Tie dead but gladly STE
"'ve and Gray stand hand in hand.
-Ea~m U. Wheeler, in The Current.
SPOOPENDYKE'S PIE,
He Shows Mrs. =. How His Mothe,
Used to Make EN-.
My dear" said Mr.. Spoopondyke
folding his napkin and pushing his
chair back from the table, INV dear
you are a pretty good housekeepcr
and once in Il while YOU contrive f.
cook up fair meal. but you have nc
business fooling around a mlnce pic,
There never was but one woman who
could make a mince pie, and that was
my mother"
II thought this was NICE" returned
Mrs. SDoopendye, with lust a little
culver resting on her lip. II got it
out of the cook book-H
"And you'd better put it right back
IN the book as a warning to other am.
ateurs, continued Mr.. Spuopcndykc.
IL don't say that this Is especially bad.
only 1t doesn't meet with all the re J.
q !;M1 Of pic as they were in
stilled into my young mind. You
might work it on founding hospitals
that never had any mother, but IL
h9sn' the soul 1 used to get out of pic
when lived at home"
"How did your mother make tina
nlnce pie, dear9" asked Mrs. Spoon.
sndyke. "lf knew what she used.
perhaps l could get up one of which
you would cat six Slices instead of
four" And with this purely feminine
dig, Mrs. Spoopendyke looked mod
estly downward and began folding
knife pleatings in the table cloth.
Gomez exclaimed MIR. Spoopen.
dyke, jumping impetuously from his
chair. III you've got the ingredi.
ehts' ~ show YOU how to make a pie
that will draw bowls of envy from the
ne,ghbors." and Mr.. Spoopkondyke
led the way to the kitchen. where's
YOUR chopping tray and the apples 7?
fetch me the hand guillotine and the
beef! Look alive now, NV dear. and
we'll startle the world with some rev.
Citations on the abstruse subject of
mince pie!" ".
LET me put this big towel around
your neck, SO you won't grease your
clothes, suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke.
dragging out Il huge crash towel,
whats that for?" demanded her
husband contemplating it with no
amount OF favor. (which end of the
pie is that thing supposed to have in
h9ence with! If l make up my mind
when l get through that this pie wants
10 De Shaved, Ill put on this skirt, but
IN the meantime want room for ali
my limbs. Now" he continued, M he
dumped the beef and apples into the
tray and went at them vigorously with
the chopping knife; NOW you watch
the proceedings and note how this pie
begins to assume proportions"
didn't your mother peel the annles
before she chopped lhemp" asked Mrs.
opo0pendyke, quietly.
"Eh!' CALCULATED MIR. spoopendyke.
slowing up little and looking into
the tray distrustfully. "Of course
not, ana he resumed his labors with
more energy. "If you did, there's
Were you made your mistake. sun.
pose You peeled the beef, too, didn't
ye? Though l don't know" and he
stopped short and regarded his work
attcntively. 1T strikes mo this meat
would chop finer if some one had dron.
ped pile driver on it once or twice.
Anyway, you don't want YOUR meat
100 hne' and ! guess this will do" and
Mr.. Spoopendyke set the tray full of
sleeves. A'
What will you have now, dearp''
inquired his wife. tenderly.
"Some flour and water" replied
MIR. Spoopendyke, checrily. "It's the
crust of pie that is its genius,
and I'm going to turn out a slab
of pastry that will be monu.
meEt to the artist who is weay-
ing this job. Gimme the flour and
water, while l feel as one uD0n
whom the spirit of successful ME
rests visibly!''
Mrs: Spoopendyke brought out the
material and once more resum.
cd the relation rs a pupil to the ex-
ercises.
Anything else, dear?" she ask
ed, as MIR. Spoopcndyke wet down
his Hour and jammed his fists in the
paste.
Nothing but profound silence" re.
torted her husband. 1.-The chief trou.
Bile with the crust to your pie is that
you allow your attention to be dis
tracted from it at the critical moment.
l, on the contrary, will stop boxing
this overcuat for that mince meat lust
at the second 1t reaches flakiness." and
DC slammed in more flour and plunged
again into his ambitious effort in the
way Of crust. "There!'' said he when
he had fought it to the consistency of
sand and mncilage and rolled It out
INTO two thick chunks. There is the
triumph of pie over puttering! Lead
out the pan whom the gods would
honor, and let's see how this combina-
ton OF hereditary intelligence and ac-
CURED brains will go when it's
Mrs. Spoopendyke handed him pic.
pan INTO which he dropped his bottom
crust, and then poured in the minco
meat.
"Got to lift your teeth pretty high
10 get around some of the meat" nc
observed, rs he tried to poke the
Jumps INTO position with a stick.
I'm not sure whether mother used to
CRATE the meat or crack il with a ham.
MGR. but it don't make SO much diff
ference. It's the crust that talks.
when you come to conversation on pic.
Now, you do this" and he marked
out sprig on tho top crust with his
thumb; ''and when you get it on, thus.
you pinch it around the edges. So
See? My mother used to have an old
wheel out of a wooden clock, and she
printed landscapes in holes all over
the pie. But that isn't necessary. It
adds luster, but no dignity, to the per-
formance. Now, we put it in the
oven. this wise. and in short time we
will have accomplished results in the
immediate line of pie"
sit is really wonderful how we'll Won