The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1885-09-22
THOSE DAYS.


Fleas and Boys.
"The melancholy days have come,
The saddest of the year."
Yes, they've got here, that's fact And
these autumn days do rile fellow. Look
at the disappointed politician. These are
about the saddrst days onto which he ever
Int, and he's about the serest old yellow
Leaf that ever vas frost bitten on the Tree
OF Liberty. Autumn is mighty unhealthy
on last years crop OF politicians, generally
speaking. All through the long summer
days they gaily culver on the parental
chill blast OF public opinion laws them in Q
cold November grave. So there they lie !:
"Unwept, unhonored and unsung."
There's another class of insects whose
occupation is about gone. We refer TO
THE FLY
-dern 'em! Nov, above the earth or
under it, inside or outsi lie of il, the hy is
the most intolersble, omnipresent nuisance
OF the age.
God bless the spider for he destroys
the fly.
God bless bad boys for they're light.
ming on the fly.
And heaven immorialize the alligator!
who kills million every pop.
Consider the cuss<Gness OF ih= iy On gen..
ersl principles
Now fiy has neither modesty nor self
denial. You seat yourself at the table-the
hy is there, too; you will find him greas-
ing his boots on top of the butter, Siding
down hill on the Loaf cake. and skating
aroucd on the ice cream; and finally dies
sweet and glorious death In the syrup.
Ii you dip INFO the sugar bowl, he rides.
triumphaDtly astrsddle your SPOONFUL of
sweetness, and he's into your coffee before
you can get sip, turns over and swims on
his back, shakes his Est in your face, and
dares you to swsllaw him.
We have known him to gnaw an editors
ear while writing, and receive blue streak
OF profanity without fnching.
We have seen minister trying hard to.
save souls, with the thermometer go in
the shade, and just as be was getting a
good grip, big inhdel OF fly would in
terfere and copper his game.
For how can q minister preach salvation
successfully with q fly on the end of his
nose. IL can't be did.
30 you see some sinner Just IS he has
got worked up to proper sense of bis con-
oition, and be realizes what an onary cuss
he is, he looks up in bis anguish, catches .
sight of that fly on the ministerial nose,
and away goes all his hopes Of salvation.
Blast that fly!
But his sad DAYS have come al last, and
ne amt got no winter clothing, so Mr.. Fly
lights out.
But now let all Pettis county Just get
right down upon its knees and thank the
Giver of every good and perfect gift for the
hrst black frost, for Its sure death unto
THE FLEA.
The flea the flea! the nimble hsal
A lively cuss is this same flea.
see, see, this 6endish flea,
A sticking his grippers into me!
With cautious grasp I hold him fast,
And shout ex-ult-ing-lee
My fingers ope, in foolish hope,
But gone is that cussid feal
The flea ! the flea dsrn that heal
For this is the way he fooie b me:
Drat that flea!
E-ter-nal-lee,
E-E-E-E-E!
We believe in the Bib'e-the Commune
ion of ssints-ths forgiveness of Sin-the-
Honesty of Lankworthy-aud the RAzoo=,
but we will never believe
That the flea has an iota OF humanity or
. morsel of religion Not any.
Well the flea will get frost bit, too, ard
will have to take the NJ. K. & T. and skin
put to Texas
Talk about melancholy days indeed
Hast thou considered
THE BEDBUG?
Gentle reader, he has destroyed the
peace of more families than intemperance.
Ii We were very sleepy, and had to-
choose between guilty conscience and the
bug for a bedfellow, We would take old
guilty conscience every pop.
This bug is no fool.
Hot water won't phase him-be takes It
10 boil his eggs in; coal oil to him is q
sodsend, and nothing can induce him TO-
cave home and desert his friends.
He has q strong constitution, and can lie
awake all night he has an aim in life and
great moral frmness, which united with q
double row OF front teeth, invariably make
him a good living.
Fopr bugs are enough for man in ordi-
nary health, at one time, but we have
SHOWN people who were extravagaut enough
% keep q hundred in one house.
Hotels, of course, alwsys.support great
many, to provide for emergencies, and gen.
,rally have enough TO go round.
We know this bug.
Oft in the Silly night,
Ere slumbers chain hath bound me-;
i had scarce snuffed out the light,
Ere the bed bugs were around me.
But the saddest days make the bug turn
Up his toes, and good square sleep cln
Don be had.
We shall have something more to sag
lpon these saddest days soon.
Commence the Year Right.
Don't make too many resolutions, bue