Savannah morning news., 1885-07-25
BRIGHT BITS.

THE fourth-class Postmaster may go fret,
but many a hrst-class stamp seller will go
fOrth.--Enehan0e.
IT is reported thata horticuturist has sue
ceeded in growing variety Of fraspberryw
contains less than 9Si 430, GOO 100000 seeds to
each berry, hut we fear the rumOr Is too good
to be true.-Nofristo3on Herdld.
MERcHANT-'I like your looks, my boy, and
perhaps can find work for you. You are
quite orderly, do you thinkp
Boy-"Oh, yes"
You have a place for everything"
80, yes. have n great many places for
everything. Ph{tGdelphiG CAL.
WE don't suppose there is any truth in the
rumOr mat reaches us from Washington
20 the effect that the Congressional Rec0rd has
lomed the syndicate which prints illustrated
stories ana portraits of "Men of the Hour, -
change IN the literary character of the
Eecord Is desirable. but 10 already prints too
much tictlon.-NOrrjSt0l6D HerdId.
THE glorious summer time has come
The humble bees resOunding bum m-m
Is heard among the flowers.
Ihen threatening clouds mass overhead,
And sore afraid,
Each timid maid
Seeks refuge on the feather-bed
From thunder shOWers.- Christian Tnder.
"WELL, pve won your case won the piece
OF land, the pig and the cow said LAWYER
sharp to his client, Uncle Isaac. "Waal.
now, what do Won get for your services?"
on" answered the legal luminary, - get
tue piece OF land, the pig and the cow" Uncle
Isaac has been sOlilOquzng for nearly a
week and has just come to the conclusion that
he got left.-Th ,Judge.
SAID Bass to DR.. Pelleteer, who is in the
homeopathic line, SLOW iues your like cures
IKE work IN case ike this. for instance: 4
friend OF mine, no matter how warm he may
be when he first goes 10 bed. soon becomes
chilled and suffers great pain in consequences
Now, what would yOu recommend In his
caseY The doctor replied, without stopping
to take breath, "a cOunterpane, of course. -
Boston Irdnscr{pt.
The other day, after wheezy old hand-
organ had been played on for ten minutes in
'front.' OF an uptown residence, the owner de-
seended the steps and asked:
'DO you expect DAY for standing here and
grinding out such a nolse?"
"Well, SIR some paws me for grinding out
the noise, ana some pays me for stopping it
anu moving on. ou can take your choice"
~ WGH Street NeJCs.
lie WILL NEVER MORE BE COLD
Only these words he uttered,
In voice he tried to subdue;
On the sultry air il futtered;
us It hot enough for vOu?"
He is now among the missing,
To return his chance is slim;
And amidst the fire Kissing.
tits hot enough for him-Nelo York Journal.
A FESTIVE young man bought a yacht.
And within IL he soon placed cacht,
IndJ ne salu was "aS neat ms a dacht.'
And he found that much comfort he gacht
In drinking his whisky quite hacht;
What bis friends said he cared not iacht;
For of cheek and of brass he'd a acht:
hland advice he ayowed that he'd nacht;
Al last he became such a sacht.
Folks were glad when he "went to pacht."
-OhjcdgO Sun.
"TM HONEST in what say, I'm honestr he
shouted, jumping up and down and cracking
his heels together II want to lick somebody
or get licked! I'm spilin' for a fight! want
gore-gall0ns of it--an' Pm wilin' to shed
barrels. Gimme exercise or gimme DEATH"
The crowd e 'osed in and pounded him. and
walked on HIM, and Jumped on him, and fell
on HIM, and whipped him cold.
Two hours later his only remaining eve
! opened slightly and he whispered with a sigh
of content:
Boys, was honest. This is paradisev'-
! brakes NdgGsiRe.