The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-08-14
GENERAL GRANTS MEMORANDA.
Nearly Two Hundred Tablets Preserved by
DIR. Douglas.

washington SLar
DR. Douglas has preserved nearly 200 tablets
written to him by General Grant during his i'll
ness He proposes to have them Autographed
and present the originals to the family. This
morning your correspondent was given oppor-
tunity 20 look at some of them. Shortly after
General Grant began to find it difficult to talk
from the manner in which the cancer affected
the vocal cords, he wrote as follows on the Goth
OF June to DR.. Douglas: II shall have to be
careful about my writing. l see every person
give piece of paper 10 puts it in his pocket
Soma day they will be coming up against my
English" 1t was General Grants style to read
up books concerning the history of the war and
the records of the rebellion very closely aud
carefully, and then to sit down and write for
hours at stretch on his memoirs.
On the 23d of June, at 5 T. NJ, he tried to tell
DR.. Douglas something about his condition, and
he wrote the following: II said had been add
ing to my book and to my coffin. l presume
every strain the mind Or body is one more
nail in the coffin" In conversing with DR..
Douglas about his book General Grant said he
lay awake nights after he had been reading up,
and planned what he should write, and that
sometimes his thoughts kept him awake perhaps
longer than they should. On the 9th of June,
at 10 a. n, the General wrote: II don't talk,
because my mouth is easy and l want tc keep so
as long possible. If | should get up now L
would PROBABLY go to work preparing something
for reading up" Before the above tablets were
written the patient had told DIR. Douglas that ha
had finished about what he had on hand of his
memoranda, for his book was constantly on his
mind, and whenever he was depressed or weari-
neas overcame him he seemed to find comfort
and relief in his work. On the same day in the
afternoon he wrote tablet saying that he had
been at work despite what he had said in the
| morning He wrote four pages l tore it off
and have it. l must read up before | can write
properly"
On the % of July. at p. NJ the General
wrote this interesting tablet: Il have had no
rest since you left there Think feel more like
work than any time since have been here I
will try to rest little. however. l worked and
feel little weak from it. but l cannot SLEEP.
From this morning [ have dozed off a few
times but not half an hour IN the aggregate I
have been writing up my views Of some of
generals and of the character. of Lincoln anu
Stanton. | don't place stanton people.
Mr. Lincoln cannot be exalted to highly" Most
of the tablets. all of them with few exceptions,
in fact, refer to the symptoms of the disease. On
June %, at p. ~, he wrote: This is always
the trouble; no matter how we'll get along the
balance of the "a hours, when the middle of the
AFTERNOON comes [ begin to feel stuffy, stopped
up, and generally uncomfortable"
On the Both OF June the General wrote the fol-
lowing: The atmosphere here enables me to
live in comparative comfort while | am being
treated or while nature is taking its course with
my disease. | have no idea that should have
been able to come here now if had remained in
the city. 1t is doubtful whether | would have
been alive now would be much better able to
move back than was to come UP at the time I
did" This the General signed with his name.
~. S. Grant"
On the lst of July the General expressed ths
wish to have wine discontinued and wrote as
follows: Il have not taken any wine in six days.
So far as have tried. 1 don't think alcoholic
drinks agree with me. They seem to heat me
up, and have no other effect" General Grant
had periods Of dependency, and when no was
respondent he always seemed to fear that he
might strangle or choke to death. DIR. Douglas
assured him that there was no danger of this.
provided assistance was near. This allayed the
dependency of the patient. On July the
General wrote as follows: There are times
when could not recover if left to myself, What
is to be my fate to night, doctor; will l have to
lay awake making it study? 1t is about as
much as [ could stand to go through another
night" His anxiety not to be left alone too,
was the very reason why DR.. Douglas remained
by him so faithfully and so constantly, ready for
any emergency. July 4, at Z p. M, he wrote:
81 have been getting along very well to-day,
There is a growing weakness, however"