Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-11-27
PuNeENT PARAGRAPHS.

IL do love dress!n exclaimed young
society belle. "Then should think you
would wear more Of it," retorted the
cynical bachelor friend of middle age.
IN Y. Independen.
The transformations of nature are
wonderful. Put herring in a tin box
with some cotton-seed oil and it imme-
diately turns into sardine. = PhiLddeL-
phia Call.
-"Was it a forgeryP' asks a maya
zine writer We are unable to say
without knowing more about it. II he
escaped to Canada it was probably only
a sharp business speculation IN Y.
Ledger.
You must not expect to catch a big
fish by simply dropping your tackle into
the water and pulling it up again. You
have to offer genuine inducements that
will impress the fish as to your good
faith-sort OF worm yourself into his
confidence, as it were. SO to speak
Lot0eH Mass. Citizen. ~
Woman, God bless her bright oyes,
can make roses bloom in the desert, and
when so minded she can give to she
.most commonplace affairs OF life rather
much of a rainbow look; but to save her
eyebrows she can't use a pen without
getting ink on her fingers any more
than she can remember the day of the
month. y YonberS Statesman.
"A dispatch from Keene, N. H., in
speaking Of the killing OF an elephant
at that place. says: "The huge beast
tell with dull thud without noise or
a struggle" We are glad we under
stand what dull thul really is. Wo
have heretofore been led to suppose it
sounded like a fat man sitting down on
q banana peel.-M Y. Graphic.
-Wheu the young man. after four
years. of hard training, graduates from
college with tremendous biceps and a
phenomenal chest, and e.ters a single
scull race on the Harlem River, and is
wiped out by a horny-hauded son Of
toll, who never heard of Cicero or
Tiberius. or Horace's "Ars Rowetica, "
then is the time he wants to know why
he has labored all these weary, weary
years.-M y. Sun
The disposition OF children not TO
allow other children to get ahead Of
them is once more illustrated in two
families as follows "I've got silver
dollar" 'I've got two" "You
haven't got baby in your house.
"Yes we have; we've got twins
"Well, you haven't got crazy grand
father; have. ~ Boston Herald.
-"I never did take much stock III
that story about fish being such fine
brain food," inadvertently remarked
Smith, "and / take less stock in it than
ever now that I've lived off little else
for some time past. l think I'll quit
them" Il wouldn't if were you, old
boy" feelingly remarked Smithers
"you see the fish in order to improve
the brain must have something to worl
upon. They can't create the thing.
And then Smith said that Smitheh
talked tor all the world like his wife. :
OIL city (Pa.) Blizzard.
--"Cud ye' help me er little di
mawnin', bossp" inquired limping oil
darky. Use de erigernal Uncle Ton
in Mistah Hennery Wad Beechah
story, entitled Dat Dittle Ole Lo;
Cabin in de Lane. My name is Harris
sab, Geo'ge Harris. rs tryin' to rails
money enough to git obber to Brook
| lyn. ~ "No," smiled the gentleman i'm
portuned, II don't believe can do any
thing for you to-day, Uncle Tom.
HAS yo' nebber read dat book men
shuned, sahP" mo, never did" "De
yer eddicashun hab ben sadly neglected
boss. tuks yer TO or gemmen of ed
dicashun, deed | did. ."-Chicago zril
Gne.