Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-04-09
BRIGHT BITS.

TrIRTgES is an unlucsy number. a girl OF
ID j too id Tor dolls and TOO young for beauX.
-FhHa0elDhta cal.
THEY don't know what roller skates are in
chicago. v hen the girls 80 to the Kinks they
vngaZr "a couple OF nav WAGONS and fasten one
on each foot FOnbers StItesman.
If ngland viii try nerd Of our American
mules ia thu Soudan, FL Mahd's crowd viii
ave heap 81 fun whea the. undertake the
ham string game hlcqg9 Inter- 0cean.
Az ARCoLA woman set speckled hen on a
dried a.. lie pie, AMI IN tire. weeks the hen
httched fourteen nightmares with hiue rib
Uons on their talls.--Sefmdn IHdeDendeat.
Il SEE they are scry NJ refreshments on
roller skates IN some OF the restaurants,Y the
husband said AS he laid down his paper. Good
graciOusW excl ime mis- wife, ''have they no
plates: "-Boston Courier.
TIE day of the oyster is passing away,
His season is up on the first Of May;
But let TINS thought give Us comfort and cheer;
Beans are IN season throughout the year.
-B1stOa Courier.
MAMMA, do angels play on harps?"
Yes, dear; now run and take your piano
lesson" I'm minute; bat, mamma. don
bneye l want TO be an angel" WHY not.
chhdE' Cause somebody would be always
saying; Now run and take your harp lesson"
-BOston Post.
II DO so like the General" said a sweet
voice behind me at the opera
"He'7 a dear man. isn't he:"
Yes: you know am -ort II related to him"
Indeed! never knew that. How"
HE came very near beng my father. He
was the II fst man my mother was engaged to.
Sun Franctsc) Chronicle.
"WHAT's The matter BoCgs2" said that gen
uemaa's partner. as be llmped into the Office
the Hther morning.
"NelI, my wife had o bad case Of night
mule last night" explained Boggs.
~ on mean nightmare, don't you?'
No; mean a5ghtH,u}s. She kicked me out
OF bed four times ''-Sat Francisco Post.
TEE ofice-seeker, in his dreams,
Of sanguinely surmises
That whe the coming daylight beams
lie then know what his prize is;
But each succeeding morrow
II learns that, to his sorrow,
The new adm nistraEIon seems
series Of surprises
Anonymous.
Mrs. SLWDIET-"You seem to know every
thing about horses. Won't you explain to me
hos TO tell @ horses ase.' Thin Boarder-
Certainly. BY the teeth" "nh, yes; 1 had
heard OF that. but I had forgotten 1t. Can the
ages Of al tnimals be known IN the same
way:' y es. / can tell chickens age bv the
teeth " 50 chicken has no teeth" ''No: but
/ have. PAiLadelohia cal.
MRS. CHEgaY-You see my dear, l am
prompt about calling. l always make 1t a
aOint to cal on tie bride early, before the
honeymoon j. over. you know.
Bride (weariy)-I fear you are too late.
Mrs. Cherry-Too late Why. YOU have
hardly got settled In your new home yet
Bride know, but the honeymoon is over
Mr.. Cncrry-Over?
Bride-Ges: the market bills have begun to
come in.-PhiL8delphid call.
THE GLAD SHAD SEASON
Ow comes the season Of the shad,
When fishermen are jolly glad
And shekels &. their treasiry add:
When bOarder- get them awful mad
And utter word unlike 'egad,"
A fraud with pins ana needles clad.
The housewife looks her saddest .ad
At el0quence If household DAT"
When, wrestling With the o'ergrOwn scad,
III stabs his thOrIx awful bad:
And vi hen she sees her little lad
All pierced as with deadly brad,
She wish trat for meal she'd had
Instead of that COMPOUNDED shad
A bland but homeless liver pad.
-I0akers Gdsette