Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1885-03-06
MY FIRST MURDER.
Brattieboro, Vt.

never realized until quite lately what q
lot the fellows who write books and things
have to answer for. For instance, am pret-
ty sure that should never have thought of
committing murder but for a particular srti-
Gle in the Cornhill Magazine. l don't often
read magazine articles, but this one was
brought TO my notice in q rather exceptional
way. l had occasion to pay q visit to my
dentist, and on being shown into his waiting
room observed at once that there was an
addition to the current literature upon the
table. had been there (from circumstances
over which l have unfortunately no controD
SO frequently that knew the list by heart
There was q volume of PuDch for 1872, q
list of the Governors OF University Hospital,
the Adventures OF Mr.. Ledbufv," by Al
bert Smith the second volume OF Mr.. Car.
ington," by Mortimer Collins a time table
Of the Southeastern railway, and several odd
numbers OF the transactions of the Odon.
tological Society" had tried them all, at
various times, aud had found them, without
exception, vanity. l defy any one to enjoy
humors even Of the most rollickinR descrIp-
tion, with those folding doors staring him in
the face, and yelp OF anguish occasionally
audible behind them. l had made several
attempts at Mr.. Caringtou," but when you
have no means Of ascertaining either how a
story begins or how It ends the interest soou
L
page. With the other books l had still less
success, for obvious reasons. Under such
circumstances it may be imagined that l
caught sight Of the familiar yellow cover Of
the Cornhill with much satisfaction. found,
TO my surprise, that it was a quite recent
number, bearing date September last. l
pounced upon It, and was soon deep in a
highly interesting story, entitled the Gu
rate OF Churnside." 1t set forth how q nice
young curate, by name Walter Dene, OF
charming manners and artistic tastes-a man
who showed the tenderest solicitude for little
sick girls, and a touching considera son even
for their aged grandmothers impelled,
by pressure OF circumstances, to murder his
uncle. had always had a prejudice against
murderers, whom l pictured to myself as
vulgar and brutal persons like the late Mr..
Peace, but began to see that there might
be another side to the question. The story
showed in the cleArest aud most unmistaka.
BILE manner that Walter Dene really had no
alternative. He had not the least wish to
murder his uncle, but the old gentleman
formed an obstacle to Walters union with an
amiAble and deserving young lady, and it
was absolutely necessary that he should be
removed. Accordingly, Walter makes up his
mind to remove him, and does so, stabbing
him artistically 10 the back with bowie
knife. 1t shows the natural kind hearted
ness of the man that, having in Withdrawing
the knife accidentally wounded the paw Of
the murdered mans .vorite spaniel, Walter
Dene sits down quietly by the side of the
corpse and binds up the dogs wounded limb
with his own pocket handkerchief. l had
reached this point in the story when the fold
ing doors opened. My dentist APP cared in
the opening with his usual crocodile smile.
Il never could realize crocodiles tears, but
s.ta Nkatu as,,tla \ a,,1 kaa
ed me in. bad to lay down the story un-
finished, and to this day don't know what ul.
timately became Of the tender hearted mur-
derer.
For the next half hour or so my attention
was diverted from the subject by extreme
personal discomfort, but on leaving the cham
Der of horrors aud regaining the street the
history came back to me with renewed vivid
ness. l found myself examining Walter
Denes arguments for the suppression Of his
uncle with a sort of personal interest For
l, too, have an uncle, l, too, love (and am
beloved by) a charming girl, and my uncle is
the only obstacle to our union. / don't mean
to say that he objects to it-quite the contra
ry but the mere fact of has continuing to
exist, aud thereby retaining possession of his
money, which would otherwise come to me,
is an efeotual bar to our happiness. Dear
Julia is a charming girl, but, like the young
lady in the song, her face is her fortune, and
it is hardly to be supposed that 1, Benjamin
Grylls, a ckrk in her Majssty's civil service
at 9l50 a year, could marry on that, even
with the additional hundred or so my uncle
allows me. Really the parallel was wonder
fully close. In some respects, indeed, mine
was the stronger case. For the Reverend
Walter Dsne's unole was not (ssve by the
mere fact of his existence) Objectionable.
Mine was Not to mention his disgusting
habit of calling me Benny, aud of cracking
what he was pleased to consider jokes at my
expense, he bad sundry manners and Gus
toms which, to a delicate minded person,
we're extremely offensive. He would wear
an old serge jacket and carpet slippers and
not unfrequently he would come down to
breakfast without collar or neekte, and not
always in the oleanest OF shirts Now If
there is one thing more than another on
which pride myself, it is my shirts. l al
ways wear (Unole Thomas pays the laun-
dress's bill) a clean shirt every day, and my
cuffs and collars are the envy of all the fel-
lows in our office.
come down TO breakfast looking, fatter
myself, like a gentleman Uncle Thomas
shambles in ten minutes or a quarter of an
hour later with his carpet slippers, his shirt
! front rumpled as II he had slept In 1t, and