davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
ATLANTA constitutional

Atlanta Constitution
"Whatl you fit my dress by measuring my
necki" said an Atlanta lady of fashion to
the dressmaker.
That is ali l want" was the reply.
Dear me" said the lady, "how strange
"Gynametry is the name of the science
said the lady with the measure "The sys
TEN Of measuring the female figure was dis
covered by me after years of patient study
and hard work. Professors Bartlett and Bat
tie gave the new science the name of 'gyna.
metry,' which is made up of the Greek words
that mean female measurement Tee rules,
however, which apply to the female figure
apply with equal and absolute force to the
male figure
"Do you mean to say you can make my
dress fit by simply measuring my neckr
II do, if see you"
"And if you don't see mef'
"Then must know the measure Of your
neck, the measure of your waist, and which
toe is longest"
"Dear mel Why do you want to know
which toe is longesti'
"If your big toe is longest your shoulders
are square. II your second toe is longest
your shoulders are drooped, and the waist is
correspondingly shorter. Dropping shoulders
are those that slope from the neck outward
not stopped shoulders"
HAS your system any connection with the
theory of twice around the wrist is once
around the neck, etc.
Not at all This is fallacy 1t will not
work out 1t is impossible to measure the
human form with tape line. You simply
cannot measure the back to save your life
But my system does it, and l can make a
lady's dress and never see her, by simply
having the measurements that l have
namedn
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
Theatrical Managers
IBlakely HAIL.


A theatrical manager said a day or two
ago, Il don't know whether you know it or
not, but nearly every prominent star, and
many of the most successful theatres are
not run by the men whose names are printed
as managers, half SO much as by some quiet
individual, who holds the position Of the
power behind the throne, and who is not
generally known to the public as the head of
the firm. For instance, Dan Frohman,
quiet and unobstrusive gentleman, who
works night and day, Is entirely responsible
for the vast success Of the Madison Square
theatre, just as Theodore Moss is the pro-
prietor and owner of Wallacks theatre. In
the same way, John Duff is the man who has
enabled Daly's theatre to succeed. and Billy
Connor was for many years the cause of the
great success which attended John McCul-
lough's tours
/ mention these few namsS casually. but
the mo It pronounced instance of all is that
Of the mother of Lotta. Lotta has two
brothers, both of whom are in the theatrical
business. They are clever enough young
men, but they have no more to do with Lot
ta's business than she has herself. Mrs.
Crabtree the aged mother Of the famous
star. has entire control Of the finances, and
is the business woman of the whole Crabtree
family. She is extremely sharp at a bar
gain, and much of the great fortune which
Lotta has accumulated is the result Of the
keen business insight Of her mother.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

duplicate vouchers. A member OF the firm
writes his o. X on the voucher presented
to him, and the bookkeeper, hav wing carefully
inserted his carbon paper underneath, has
two vouchers for the same sale He has left
the date blank, and afterwards fills it up
with any date he pleases | had such a case
not worry long ago, and | detected the ruse
the moment set my eyes on one of the
vouchers. That strategem is rather stale
nowadays, and has gone out of fashion.
"Many of the defalcations are the result of
conspiracy. Those who are employed to act
as checks upon each other pool issues and di-
vide the profit. These cases are hard to de-
tect, as the accounts are often perfectly reg
ular. But young men who enter into such
dishonest enterprises are apt to be indiscreet,
and they usually display by their extrava-
gance the disproportion between their sal
aries and their expenses.
@The ignorance of many rich men regard
ing their own business is incredible. knew
of one case where a firm owed one of the
partners over sl00, 600, of which he was as
good as ignorant. A great many firms are
vaguely aware that their employees are
cheating them, but while business is pros
porous they say, Never mind, we are max
ing enoughr Statesmen in dry-goods stores
constantly hand goods over the counter to
their friends without any return whatso-
ever, and in many establishments hundreds
of thousands of dollars Dass through the
hands of men who are not even restrained
by a system of checks, and who can put an
indefinite sum in their pockets without leav-
ing any record whatsoever IL / were
young man receiving a salary Of SIS a
month and handling a very large amount
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
TCor. New York Tribune. !


Standing in the Bowery and looking across
the site of the old Windsor theatre, ono faces
the rear of an immense tenement-house. At
night every window is aglow with lights
which by contrast with the gas and electric
lights of the street you recognize at once rs
the cheap oil lamps of the poor. There are
some eight floors of this house, and it is not
less than 100 feet wide, or five old houses in a
row thrown into one. On each floor of these
five houses are probably eight rooms like the
ones seen at the rear-a little larger a little
better, perhaps; and each giving shelter to a
family.
The average, | am told, is four to a room
In such buildings. That means go persons to
a house, or ], ,250 human beings crowded into
the one tenement which tho five old buildings
form. This means that a population greater
than that Of any one of thousands of incor-
porated towns and villages in this country is
crowded into a single building on a plot of
ground 100 feet square. Think of it in those
torrid days with the thermometer at 80 de-
grees, and don't grumble any longer at your
own fate. If one only looks at it in this
spirit one can find a great deal Of satisfaction
in reading paragraphs like this showing what
a miserable and unhappy world it is that we
live in
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

"He said he'd just come from Paris In the
steerage. He had been one Of the Mastoion
minstrels and had been left there He
noticed a new French fashion and proposed
to establish it here. AL he lacks is money.
You'll remark that most of the fellows
who've got new ideas to establish only lack
money"
But the planp
ats very simple. They have a platform
at one end of the establishment and while
the dinner is going on there is a musical
performance. For instance, Delmonico
would give a piano recital for break
fast, with violin solo and a soprano
vocalist to fill in with, and at dinner
a string orchestra under Theodore
Thomas would give grand, way up concert
Unemployed variety talent. We'd get up a
dinner programme of musical mokes, q
couple of song -and-dance men and a serio-
comic
Would it aid the busiuessr
Il don't think it would. 1t would be in
the nature of an extra; but if the public
must have music with its hash we must give
it, no matter what it costS"
"Then there's no immediate move that
wayf'
mo; but it's coming-I see it. The variety
business is being crowded out of the thea
tres and must find footing in the rsstau-
.aIIts, after the style Of Psris"
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

"ine Java was designed for fast steam
cruiser for the purpose of pursuing such swift
vessels as the Alabama and others
Of her class. She was to be capable
of attaining speed of seventeen knots
an hour; in fact she might have
equaled the speed of the Arizona. The
Java was mainly built for speed, and all her
woodwork was of the best white oak. She
would have made a formidable mate to the
Colossus, and especially in those old war
times the two vessels could easily have with
stood the attack of any other two men-of-
war 1t is a pity to see them go without
having even touched the salt water, but then
the space that these two old hulks occupy is
very valuable and will be used for something
else hope more useful and ornamental"
when are you going TO begin the work of
destruction
I'VE have commenced 70 demolish the
Colossus already, and rs soon as we take on
some more help We will lay the Java low. 1t
will take about five months altogether to
break up the two ships"
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
Blowing Up q Glacier.
London News. |


One of the youngest as well as one Of the
most beautiful glaciers in the country is that
which gives birth to the river Rhone, and
the grandest sight in connection with the
Rhone glacier is the superb seracs, or pinna-
cles of ice, which prove a source of unending
attraction to travellers by the Furka pass.
As is well known, the second and third bends
of the road almost hang over the glacier, and
afford a wonderful view OF the stupendous
ice fall, which, descending from precipitous
rocks, is broken and twisted into fantastic
pyramids This sight, writes our Geneva
correspondent, is certainly unique in that
part of the Alps, but unless active steps are
taken to stop the destruction now going on it
will soon be so no longer.
1t appears that some people have obtained
permission-from whom it is not clear-to
destroy these pinnacles by means of dynamite,
in order that the huge blocks thus easily
detached may be put on the st. Gothard
railway, and so transported to Bale, where
they are 10 be stored in immense wells for
summer use. Should the destruction of the
glacier be allowed to continue the authorities
will find 10 the r cost that they have killed
the goose that laid the golden eggs. for the
chief attraction of that desolate region is the
superb ice pinnacles of the great glacier, and
when they have disappeared travellers will
turn their steps in other directions.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
Mountain Air by the Cake.

tChicago News Flats and Sharps.r1
A Colorado millionaire, who owns a chain
of valuable mining properties in and around
Leadville, came to Chicago lately upon q
rather curious mission. He has invented
during his leisure moments a curious machine
whereby air may be condensed and COM
pressed. BY an ingenious combination Of
certain chemicals and his electric trithnome-
ter. as he calls it, large volumes of air ore
compressed into small packages or cakes,
closely resembling the cakes of compressed
yeast in common use. These cakes Of COM
pressed air expand upon beng exposed TO the
light and atmosphere, and in the course Of
half an hour an ounce cake of this curious
composition will evaporate into l3S. 900 cubic
feet of fresh air suitable for breathing.
The inventor intends to have a large ma
chine manufactured by company in this
city after the model e, ectric trithnometer he
brings with him. This machine he will
transport to Colorado where he will organize
a joint stock corporation for the manufac-
ture of compressed air. This will enable in
valids to benefit by the clear, pure invigorat-
ing atmosphere of the Rocky mountains, al
though thousands of miles away. The mer-
chant the lawyer, the doctor, the journalist,
and all other hard-worked men will pay 10
cents per cake for this compressed air and be
as much refreshed and reinvigorated by its
evaporation as if they stood upon the very
summit of Pixies peak. Fifty cents worth
Of these wondrous cakes will supply an ordi-
nary room with fresh, pure air for twelve
hours; ss worth will be equivalent to trip
from Denver to Leadville and back. At a
comparatively trifiing cost, asthma, bron-
chitis, hay-fever, and consumption can be
cured, and there will be no need of vacations
when the invention becomes populaIized.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

phia is at this moment mou, ming the loss OF
her only son, an intellectual, delicately- or
ganized boy, who died of pneumonia brought
on by exposure to a draught at a dance He
is not by any means the only one whose
evening dress has been his shroud. A fash
ionable physician who declines every invi-
tation that would necessitate his getting
into the customary full dress, tells me that
the opening of the social season always sees
a great increase in the number of his pa
tients suffering with pulmonary troubles.
The fact that this increase is not due to the
weather simply is shown by the other fact
that with the beginning of Lent, when fash
iunable entertainments are modified or given
up altogether. the number of patients falls
off and continues to grow smaller until
Easter, when up it goes again An Operatic
season is always, he says, period Of coughs,
catarrh ani incipient consumption
Aside from the matter of climate, the
danger to the American society man. my
hyscian tells me, is made greater by the
fact that he is seldom a respectable tramp,
but is pretty sure to be an active profess
sional or business man. He goes to his Office
or counting-room in the morning heavily
clad, as he must be to meet the rigors of the
elements, and remains so all day. At o,
when the sun has gone down and the ther-
mometer has dropped, he comes home, ex-
changes his thick warm clothing for the
light and open swallow tail, and sallies off to
a dinner or ball In the latter case he will
probably be returning just before dawn, the
very coolest time of all the twenty-four
hours. There never was a carriage invented
that could keep out the draughts, and if one
is obliged to forego the comfort of closed
vehicle there is the added danger to be ap-
pretended from snow and rain and Slushy
streets and sidewalks.
While the fashion of full dress lasts 1t Will
of course always have an army of followers,
and there are some precautions that 1t will
be well to observe. 1t is a good thing to
have heavy flannel or perforated buckskin
chest protector to be worn under the linen
only when a swallow-tail is donned. 1t is
good, tGo to wear another outside the linen,
SO that it may be removed and put into an
overcoat-pocket when ones destination is
reached, and read justed on again going out
of doors. Despite all precautions, however.
one might just as well understand that q
certain number of men must die of the
swallow tail every season.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
Manifestations at q Revival.
lChicago Herald ]

The mesmeric power of Mrs Woodwork,
who is conducting the great revival at Hart
ford, City, Ind, is said to be great. Her
subjects are not always paralyzej at sight,
but frequently 60 away and find themselves
prostrated afterward. The wicke!eSt man
in the town entered the meeting the other
night for the purpose Of breaking it up As
he strode up the aisle cursing in a loud voice
the revivalist fixed her eye on him and he
lost the power Of speech for the rest of the
evening One young woman went to an
evening service and returned home in a nor
NAL condition The next morning she was
found sitting up in bed, cold and stiff, with
wide staring eyes and speechless 1t took
three hours of hard work to tring her out Of
her trance.
Miss Viola McDermot, another young lady,
goes off into frances every time she attends
the revival, and in spirit visits
the eternal world. Il know as well as any
body" she says, "wden the frances are COM
ing. My hands get cold and l can feel my
arms stiffening My eyes get hard and the
inside of the church-room gets smaller. The
darkness begins at the outer edges of the
room and comes toward me from all sides
Finally the sight is gone and am in two
worlds. can hear everything that is said
here and there and can see the great white
throne" There are many other people in
that vicinity similarly affected.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
DON'T WOBBlE ABOUT.
Brother Gardner Rebukes the Wobbly
Man-"Be Plumb Up an Dowh."
L.. ..I1


Brother Gardner Rebukes the Wobbiy
Man-"Be Plumb Up an Down."
u.ime-Ki Club.I
Elder Toots having got most az his feet
under the redhot stove. and Col Caboots
having succeeded in knocking down a bust
of Plato and w1eckinr $500 worth of relics
Brother Gardner arose and said:
aWhat banker arter am to meet a plumb
I'D an, down man. Oar, am pussons in dis
club who wobble about like loose wagon
wheel. One day dey greet YOU wild grin as
soft as June, an de mex day dey doan'
know you as you pass on de street. doan'
mean to hurt no mans feelin,s. but mean
to be plumb.
GIf Whalebone Howker should come ober
to nv house an ak de loan of a dollar I
wouldn't keep him on de hooks fur half an
hour fur decision. should at once reply
Tn him. sVhalahona da man wbo usas
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
A Matter Of Luck.
TROsfon Heraldl

A gutter band consisting of five Germans
was footing an excruciating tune in front Of
beer saloon on Druid Hill avenue the other
morning The musicians were incased m
thick clothing and three of the cornetists
wore mittens, making it impossible for them
to sound one note without closing all the
valves on their instruments The larger in.
struments were incased in bags to prevent
the cold weather and the vigorous blowing
of the players from splitting the brass
"Say, Jim, give them fellers a nickell"
shouted potato fakir to his partner, who
was passing the band. The vender immedi-
ately went down in his pocket and gave a
coin to the little stout fellow who was Justify
blowing the cornet with icicles.
as it customary for arabs to give money
to gutter bandsr asked a reporter.
"Oh, yes" replied the peddler Of vegeta-
bles, as he changed five huge potatoes from
one hand to another. "You see, we have to
do it for luck. I'll bet sl00 we sell out be-
fore noon an if we had let that band pass
we'd a ben kept peddling all day."
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

lfnllauelplla lines.
Thaddeus Stevens grave is grown over
with noxious weeds, and neglect and decay
are visibls on every side about his tomb.
ii-OiA-.s.l III
Previous to Its first publication in 1S42, il
appears that the poet laureate had printed q
few copies of his now famous poem OF
"Locksl-y Hall" for private circulation. Ir
his private edition were two verses which d,
NOT appear in later editions. The two verse;
which were originally printed in "Locksley
hsll," followed after the line in the published
version:
And our spirits rush'd together at the touch
ing Of our lips.
The two omitted verses which bear their
own indubitable hallmark of authenticity,
are as follows:
In the hall there hangs painting, Amy's
arms are round my neck,
Happy children in a sunbeam, sitting on the
ribs of wreck.
In my life thsre is picture: she that clasp'e
my neck is flown,
am left within the shadow, sitting on ths
wreck alone.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
AT A FROZEN HARVEST.
Ice Cutting Upon Wolf Lake-Life Am,ng
Chicago Ice Cutters.
IChicapn Nsa,xs

Ice Cutting Upon Wolf Lake-Life Am,ng
Chicago Ice Cutters.
Chicago News.l
Snow, thigh-deep in the woods, knee-deep
on the frozen marches, hems in an army of
ice-cutters who are now harvesting the white
acres of Wolf lake, an irregular body Of
water five miles long and half as many miles
wide. lying near Sheffield, Ind, seventeen
miles from Chicago. There are no paths con-
Meeting that cold, desolate spot with the
outer world. The snow is q barrier which
the ice-cutters seldom cross during their busy
season.
About 300 men were working in a snow
storm on the lake the other day when the
place was visited by a reporter.
"If a man hasn't anything the matter with
his lungs" said one of the ice-cutters who
was leaning on long iron-tpped pick wait
ing for a raft to come up the channel, "there
is no more healthy work for them than ice
cutting. How do we keep from getting cold'
Three woolen shirts, two pairs of woolen
socks, two pairs of woolen mittens thick
boots, a big woolen cap, aud a muffler for
the face keep me warm in the coolest
weather. Then / always throw water on
the bottom of my trousers legs so they will
freeze to my boots and keep the wind out
But some of the men are careless The wind
is awful out here, there's no doubt of that,
for every day somebody gets his face frozen.
Big, purple ears and swelled noses are COM
mon enough among the green hands A
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

Washington Star.l

That lively and saucy little biped known
as the page" in congress is en- indefatigable
autograph seeker. But it is not for the graf
ification of retaining the signatures Of the
members, who keep him continually skip
ping about the floor, that he bores them for
autographs. There is far more material
satisfaction for him in it than that He
turns autograph fend for money. Therein
consists bis principal perquiste The grave
and dignified senator who enters the
chamber before that body is called to order
or remains after adjournment is a ready
victim Of the page The latter is provided
with an album which he first carefully
covers with paper to protect it from injury.
On the. outside of the cover is pasted roll
call Of the senate, and as each signature
is secured the name corresponding is marked
of the list To pagef who was diligently
fitting from senator to senator, as a bee sip
ping honey from flower to flower, Star re-
porter put the question: "Who employs you
to get these autographs"
"Oh, lots o EN- he replied. MOSTLY
ladies, but sum mems jes' as anxious as
women
"How much do you get for itp
"Six cents a name"
"ls there sharp competition in the busi-
nessf
"All the boys take hand in it, and we
trades all round. If any boys hasn't got
albums to fill us who has hires them to help.
Most boys don't fill more'n one in a session.
There's two or three senators that don't like
to be bothered, but we generally manage to
git 'em. We watches our chances and
catches 'sn in good humor."
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22


"I'se gwinter quit l has to look up an
odder place." said Uncle Nose to his en-
ployer, a wealthy merchant of Austin
What's the matter with you, Uncle
Mosei'
DE bizness manager has not kicked me in
de las two mumfs Not once has he lifted
his foot agin me-"
Il ordered him not to kick you again.
don't allow anything Of that kind in this es-
tablishment / intend that nobody shall hurt
your feelings, Uncle Nose"
"Ef don't get no kicks rse gwinter quit.
"Are you crazyl Doyou want to be kicked
and cuffed about!'
Yes, sab, does Ebery time de bizness
manager kicked me or cuffed my ears when
he was mad, he got ashamed of hisseH arter
ward, and CUB me quarter. rse done lost
enough money already, wild dis heah foolish
ness about hurtin' my feelin s."
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22

Inter Oceans "Curbstone Crayons- u
"One evening Rosecrans came to me and
said in a droll way, wish you would take
me over and introduce me to that Dutchman
on guard at the further gate. He stops me
whenever ! attempt to come in after dark,
and when l explain that am Gen. Rose
Grams he always exclsims: dot is too thin.
Anybody can say dot to me vas not been
a soldier for notings If you was Rosecrans
why you not have the countersign, hey"
think l ought to be introduced to him.
After the matter was explained the Dutch
man yielded the point, but he always con-
tended that RosecranS was wrong"
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-02-22
fPhiladelnhia / IAfterl

A letter from a Philadelphia woman who
has married abroad conveys the interesting
information that the prince of Wales re-
Gently appeared at an evening entertain
ment wearing high-buttoned frock coat
Only one who has lived abroad and felt the
weight Of the British lovo for swallow-tails
and high hats can appreciate the daring Of
Albert Edwards innovation. 1t is devoutly
to be hoped, however, that all true Britons
will follow the fashion set by him in this, as
in other respects, and then, of course, the
Anglo-maniacs who are supposed to show Us
on this side what to wear will take up the
mode. Experience has taught some Of US
that swallow tail coats and 'ow-cut vests are
not adapted to this climate
One of the loveliest woD on of Philadel-