Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1885-12-25
ODD POINTS ABOUT CHINA.
WHY FoREER NEW EoRXER RE-
TURuED TO SHANGHAI.
Everything Sn This Country seemed
gnhnndy 10 EEiuI-SOmc Hueer
Contrasts i'm Everyday Matters.


in China, George Dean, native of the
Ninth ward in this city, returned to New
York recently with the intention of re-
naming here. His mother, three sisters
and brother live in the same house they
occupied when he went away lie had
been here only two days when he began
to be homesick for China He thought
that time would conquer the feeling, but
it became stronger everyday, and after
staying two weeks he bade his mother
and sisters farewell, and sailed for Liver
pool on his way back to Che strange
country lie had learned to love bgtter
than his native land.
81 miss so many things, aud every
thing comes so unhandy to me here, " he
said. "For instance, everybody drinks
cold water here, and laughs at me when
l want to do as they do in China and
take my water warm. In China it is i'm
polite to take your hat OIL on entering a
house, and here have forgotten myself
a dozen times, and been stared at and
frowned at by ever so many because |
observed the Chinese etiquette and kept
my hat on my head on going into peo-
Piles houses. find myself ordering my
desert first at dinner, as and all China
men do at home I mean in Shanghai
and my embarrassment has been great.
Polite natives of China always drink
their tea from their saucers, which are
placed on top of the cups. forgot my
self more than once and did the same,
with an effect on others that made me
very uncomfortable. On going out
invariably have taken my fan, and a
fan like mine couldn't be purchased in
New York for the price of town lot.
l couldn't think of going anywhere
without it. But it has brought me only
ridi3ule wherever went. | find that my
visiting cards, made after the best Chinese
fashion, each one printed on yard
of the finest silk paper imaginable, are
simply useless here, and if used would
create a strong suspicion that l was in-
sane. In China my bed, and everybody
else's bed, is formed of mating, while
here the mating is laid on my bedroom
floor for me to walk on. When l go to
bed here my head sinks down deep into
the pillow, and l splutter and tumble
about all night and can't s'eep. AT
home-in China, mean--I rest ou pill.
low as hard as wood, and sleep like q
top.
The other day my nephew young
man whom l like very much, asked me
what l thought would be a nice thing
for him to buy as present for his father
at Christmas. | answered at once:
"'The very best coffin you can afford.
"Why-do you believe me!--he was
insulted, and my dear old mother was
vastly shocked 1t all came from my
being thoroughly Chinese. 1t is quite
the proper thing in China for a son tt
buy a coffin for his living father. lr
fact, it is expected that he will do so il
he is possessed of sufficient filial regard.
tod my friends so, but that shocked
them still more, and l was miserable
again. There is no use. never could
get along here Mt all. l shall die if
don't get back home-to China, mean
eyes, everything seems to be done in
China exactly opposite to the way in
which it is done here. Here l am Mr..
Dean. In China am Dean Mr.. They
don't use any soap to shave with in
China, but simply to rub the part to be
shaved with warm water, put on with g
brush like toothbrush. The part to bt
shaved is never the face, but the top oI
the head. The front of Chinese book
is the last page, and the reader begins a
the right hand corner of the page ant
reads down. The foot notes are always
at the top. The title of the book il
printed on the outside margin of tho
page. If you should ever enter a schoo
room in China you would surely think
the scholars were engaged in mobbiDe
the teacher, for they study their lessons
as loud as their lungs will let them.
When they rccite they back up to the
teacher and stand with their faces to the
other screaming pupils, instead of the
teachers, while they yell their recitation'
all together.
/ Gin China the needle on the compass
Always points to the south. At any rate,
the Chinaman believes it does. There
is no northwest or southeast. In theil
place we have westnorth and eastsouth
l see that you have in New York artists
who live by trimming finger nails. They
would be run out of China, for person
who hasn't finger nails four inches long
there isn't much in society.
"They never have any breach of promise
cases over in China A future Chinese
belle isn't three days old before hel
parents have betrothcd her to some ac
ceptable scion of a neighbor's house
When she IS old enough-and she docsn
have to be very old, for if she were in
this country she would be playing with
her doll yet-she goes to the house o
her atfianced and marries him. She
weeps and walls all the way there, as i
her idea of matrimony wasn't exactly {
cheerful one. There is always mourning
/ at Chinese marriage, while at funera
the bands play and there is feasting ant
rejoicing. And there, / think, tn,
Chinese idea is the correct one. Wher
a person marries his troubles begin. VIII.
should he rejoice? When he dies hi
troubles are over. Why should any on,
mourn9 must get back to China.
"a true-born, patriotic Chinaman will
turn with loathing from glass of fre'l
milk, while he will lift a cup of casio
oil to his lips and drain it with gusto
The oil won't make him bilious. Tn,
milk will. told you it was the prope
thing in China for son to give coifiT
to his father In case the man has n,
son, or the son is lacking in 6lial regart
or money, tits the ambition Of the fathe
to procure the coffin for himself and h,
does so as soon as he is able to. 1t i
used about the house in various eapaci
ties until it is wanted for the purpose TO
which it was purchased, Go int
any well-regulated Chinese tamily's
house and you will surely see the cotiir
/ of the head of The house occupied as
! - / 1. IL