Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-11-22
Why Yonnc Men non,t Marry


A Boston preacher last sunday took
occasion to direct the attention Of his
congregation to the fact that the per-
cenjage of young men WHO do not marry
appears to be increasing. OF course he
had reference chiefly TO the young men Of
the cities, because In the rural districts,
far removed from the influences OF the
/ cities, young men and msidens 20 on
/ wooiDg and marrying pretty much as
they always did. 1t is no doubt true
/ that there is a growing Discrimination
among the young men Of the cities to
/ marry and establish homes Of
| their own. The reason OF this
| is not because thev do not find the high
est and purest kiud Of pleasure in the So
/ ciety of refined and cultivated women,
nor because they would not like to have
/ the comforts and joys Of home life. 1t is
/ largely because their incomes are not suf-
| tcient to permit them to maintain such
homes as they would like to have, and
which the young women whom they
would in all probability marry, would
/ ike to have. The consequence is they
spend the best part, and perhaps all, of
/ their lives in hotels and boarding-hoUses,
and never know what a genuine home is.
! The young men and women Of the pres
ent day worship wealth, and they shrink
from the burdens which a slender income
imposes. They want to step from the
homes of their parents into homes that are
equally as pretentious. The young men
do not want to give up any of the pleas
ures or amusements to which they have
been accustomed, and the young women
cannot bear the thought of dressing less
extensively, or Of dispensing with any oil
the little luxuries which they have come to
regard as necessary to their comfort and
happiness. Young men therefore who
earn only enough to maintain a plain.
comfortable home and TO live in a plain
but comfortable manner, hesitate to
marry. They haven't the courage to
make sacrifices themselves or to ask the
women they would like TO make their
wives to make sacrifices. They fear that
under the stern demands of economy the
anticipated joys of home life would never
be realized
The opinion is quite general that the
day who have been reared IN wealthy
homes, and who have been used to luxu-
rious surroundings are rather helpless
creatures. There is doubtless some foun-
dalton for this opinion. They are help
less, however, only in the sense that they
know little or nothing about managing
home, or making it comfortable and at
tTactive. They want whatever money
can buy, because they have always had
full purse at their command. They
shrink from assuming the bur-
dens OF a household and a family
because they don't like to have their pleas
ures interfered with. They want rich
husbands, though, if the truth were
known, their parents in many instances
began life on an income that would seem
to them a very small amount even for pin
money. Such women do not want poor
men for husbands, and, as a rule, would
not be content with the homes which poor
men would give them. The whole or their
training has been such as to unfit them
for poor mems wives.
OF course, there are good-for-nothing
men, as there are helpless women. These
men, however, seldom amount to any,
thing in life. while the women, If mistor-
tune overtakes them, often display
strength of character, wealth of resource,
and Willingness to adapt themselves to
their surroundings that is worthy of the
highest admiration.
Evidences of the unhappiness of mar
ried lie that crop out in the divorce
! courts, and in other ways, have some.
thing to do doubtless with keeping young
men from marrying. Much of this un-
happiness is undoubtedly due to defective
training. A wife who does not make her
home attractive, cannot expect to have a
happy home, and the reason
why so many fail TO make their
homes attractive, is because they
have not been properly trained. They
have never been taught the mysteries OF
/ the kitchen or the art OF managing sery-
/ ants. They do not know how 10 econo.
mIze and save. When the expenses Of
1 maintaining a home exceed the income
the strain is generally more than the
most amiable disposition can stand, and
smiles give place TO frowns.
| Parents make great mistake in trOin-
ing their daughters as if they were to be
the wives of rich men. 1t is probable
that the wives OF most of the rich men in
this country to-day helped their husbands
TO make their fortunes. They were not
burdens to them. They knew how to
help them, and they did help them.
!
From Tampa TO Havana.