davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11
Eefesrapeif4e 9epef6en.
8 eutf d an b.

Berlin, 5. 9lus. Ser an ben Ratb
bes vGsmps". bic fran3Oiii9e &sitsrei an
Der beuti4sn @rense gu psrifdrtsn, sss
fnipfte gusfuu Der vNorbbsuti6sn allses
msinsn Ssituns" sesen 6rantreid bat bic
Verliner unb bic Sranffiirter 8SrIe ernff.
lid beeiaiuBt. Sn amtlidsn &reiien uers
mutbst man, baB Der Mrtitel ben 3wed bat,
bas Yublitum auf cine bebeutenbe @rb5.
buns bes Militdr' gtais porsubereiten.
Die idmmtli9ea beuti9sn 3situnsen, mels
de in bic TuBtapfen Der ,Nor6beutiaen
aasemeinen 3eituns treten, bsbsn bic Chats
iade beruor, baB, feit bas ginpernebmen
swiihen Oenti9lanb unb gnslanb ii4
beHert, &ubIanb uno Grantrsid sinanbsr
ii9 ndbsrn.
Berlin, 8. Mus. Depsiden aus Ga,
itein nlelben. oae Der Raiier WilbeIm ben
beabf9tisten Ysiad, in Sldl. mo- rr nit
benz Raiier pon Oelterrsi1 3uiammentrsfs
fen iollte, aufseseben babe, unb Der &aiisr
uon Oeiterrei9 nad @aitsin ssben werbe.
Der sreiie &aiisr bat fi9 non isinsr neu.
lidsn &rantbeit erboIt unb Iset ssssnlpars
tis cine fir cine Yerion uon isinen Sabrsn
ssrabs,u wunbsrbare 9sbsnstrait au ben
Gag. ST madt tdsli9 auf Der Yromsuabs
lamss SpaSiersdnSe.
Yaris, 8. Mus. 0ie bisiisen Slat.
ter beiprsden ben fiirsli3 In Der v9iorb,
bsutidsn Masemeinsn !3eituns" sntbaltsn
seweienen @nsrifi auf 5rantreib, unb be-
trorbfeu i'm aI6 eiue mebr an Neu he,itlheu
&eidstas ais an Srantreid seridtsts 8ors
bereituns anf cine YsritdrtunS Der bsutidsn
Griessma4t.
Oetrei9s sunsarn.
@ien, 5. Mus. @sitsrn bat ii9 Der
ubberufene ameritaniide @siauots Trancis
bel Csm Wfinifsr beS Muswa,tissn, Sra
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11

bic Srase Der periOnli9sn 6reibeit obsr,
um es beutIid aus;ubriden, bic Ismpsrenss
5rase in Der ndditen Wabl cine 5aupts
role, unb bas Cincinnati goltsblatt" felt
Sabren entidieben republifanii9. brobt ben
Gspublitanern nit ieinem Mbfau.
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11


IS Roaate 5000
9 Wsnate s 6 %
SoeaI WetiseA.
Siir ieoe !3eile Srepier, oter Der Raain. sa
eritemal 1O Gents, Die uddlten Mfale @ents.
9eiratbss nno Sobesunseiseu nit eprM&
S1.5O, obne Sprt Sl.00
anstpdrtise sHitissn maHeu porsassc,abt ss ben.
4n;ei9en fir Iicnics, sotterieu e'ladslpiele
&C., ole Dem @efte Der tatb. Sir9e ;usiser, firs
ben teine aufuabme.
Nmaetsen ienSe ntatt SpdtekenS
Wonta8 Wor8en eim.
Job.2lrbeiten aller Dirt prompt uno
billiS ausSefiibrt.
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11
preife Der 2ln,eisen.

SsSer Sou Der Spalte per Sabr !. .$18.O0
8 Noaate 5000
!. 9 Wsnate 5 6 %
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11

.9eirotbss uuo Sobesunsesen nit sprMd
$3.50, obne SpruG SLIGO.
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11
2oeals NstiseA.

Mir ieoe 3eile Sreuier, oser Der Raam, sa
erltemal 1O Gents, Die ud6lten Male @ents.
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11

aHs'Ddrtise sHisissa mHHcm sorsassc,asa s. sen.
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11

Werito. 8. Aug. Sa ma,atlan unb
Vsbuantspec 1T oas seIbe 6isbsr sri5ienen.
IN oem erltgenannten glibe alleroiuas nidt
lebr beftis unb ben @ersten sel1st Sort bic
Befdmpfuns Der Seude nit sutsm grs
tolge. Sn Gebuautspec bsmiben ii4 bic
ftaotii4en Seb0rben, Der Seude Elm gnSe
Su MAIDEN.
Luxemburger gazette. [volume] (Dubuque, Iowa) 1871-1918, 1885-08-11
8 c trei d. llnsarn.

@ien, 5. gus. @sitsrn bat ,ii9 Der
obbsrufene ameritaniide @sianbte Trancis
bel csm Wfinifsr bes Auswd,tissn, Sra
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

AN APPALLING SUSPICION. Ohio, is
lust now experiencing most horrible sensation.
About two weeks ago Frederick Warner, promi-
nent young farmer. came to that city and sold a
load of grain. He has not since been seen or
heard Of He was to have returned home the
night of the day on which he left home. The
next morning his wife found his team standing in
the ford of creek near their resideace, and his
hat about quarter of mile below, caught IN a
bush growing at the waters edge. 1t was then
thought he was drowned, and the creek has been
dragged every day since, but to 10 purpose.
Persons who have taken an interest III the
affair now claim that he was murdered and his
body boiled by medical student who IS now
mounting tho skeleton. This idea originated IN
the fac, that several school children few days
ago caught sight of man boiling cadaver IN the
yard at the rear of his residence. The head OF
the corpse hung over one side of the Kettle and
the feet protruded over the other. The police
were notified. They investigated the matter, but
no arrests followed To correspondent the stu
dent would make no explanation except that he
was entitled to the corpse, and was boiling it to
get the flesh from the bones in order to mount
the skeleton. Come Of Warmers friends suspect
it was his corpse that the student had in his pos
session. They refuse to make public what evi
deuce they have to substantiate their theory and
are besieging the police to make an arrest.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18
DRY GOODS.

DRY GOODS.
| ATE ARRIVAL IN ROBES.
WE HAVE JUST RECEIVED AN INVOICE OF
ELEGANT ALL-OvER EMBROIDERED
SANGLlER AND BANKOK
PONGEE SILK ROBES.
ONLY SO EACH.
SMALL. NEAT DESIGNS EMBROIDERED IN
CHOICE COLORINGS
WOODWARD & LOTHROP.
BOSTON DRY GOODS HOUSE,
ONE PRICE ONLY.
921 Pa. ave. 912Dst
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18
AGRICULTURAL.
HERBERT BRYANT,
NO, 25 KING STREET,

Offers for sale at LOWEST MARKET RATES,
1000 bushels Choice Recleaned Western CLO-
YER SEED.
500 bushels strictly prime Reeleancd Western
TIMOTHY.
200 bushels strictly prime Recseaned Western
ORCHARD GRASS.
100 bushels strictly prime Recleaned Western
Red TOP.
125 BBLs. EXTRA EARLY VERMONT ROSE
POTATOES.
GARDEN SEEDS; SEED CORN; LAWN
GRASS, DC. &c
IRoN.CLAD MILK CANS, and OTHER DAL-
RY SUPPLIES.
The Celebrated ROLAND AND REMINGTON
CHILL ED PLOWS.
CC4MINs, MINOR & HORTON, FARMERS
FRIEND and other PLOWS. PLOW REPAIRS
OF ALL KINDS. DOUBLE SHOVEL PLOWS.
CULTITATORS. HARROIVS. &c. WEBSTER
FARM WAGONS, all sizes
Everything for Farm and Garden, BRYANT'S
FINE GROUND RAW BONE, STRICTLY PURE.
BRYANTS RELIABLE FERTILIZERS, &c. &c.
jsn31.tf
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

Spring OPENING
ROBES.
Woodward & Lothrop desire to call attention to
their large stock Of Spring and Summer Robes,
comprising New Fabrics, Latest Novelties and
Handsome Trimmings, at low Prices
MUSLIN ROBES,
LAWN ROBES,
BATIsTE ROBES.
"SCHANTUNG" ROBES,
EMBD. SURAH ROBES,
PONGEE SILK ROBES.
Sufficient quantity of material and trimming
for full suit put up in fancy boxes
WE OFFER
CANTON PONGEE SILK ROBES.
CONTAINING
19l, yards Plain Material
-l2 yards Narrow Embroidery.
IL, yards Wide Embroidery
ONLY $40 80 EACH
WE OFFER
BROCADED SURAH SILK ROBES.
CONTAINING
- yards Plain Material
yards Brocade Material
ONLY $40 EACH.
WE OFFER
2O.INCH PLAIN PONGEE SILK
ONLY 30 CENTS PER YARD.
We OFFER
20-INCII EMBROIDERED PONGEE SILK,
Embroidered in Eight Different Coors,
Sl.25 AND 50 % PER YARD.
ALL SILK PONGEE EDGINGS
TO Match both tho Above,
ONLY so CENTS PER YARD.
WOODWARD e. LOTHROP.
BOSTON DRY GOODS HOUSE,
ONE PRICE ONLY.
921 Pa ave 912 ID ST.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

A NEW NURSERY OR HEATING CUP.-This
II cup is a very convenient arrangement that is
made to fit on any ordinary gas burner, and by
which hot or boiling water can be obtained in a
short time. Sold by
ian27 E. s. LEADBEATER & BRO.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18
0azette.
PUBL1sHED DAILY AND TRI-WEEKLY By
EDGAR sNOWDEN,
At the Gazette Building, Nos. 70 q 72 Prince St
TERMS

pAILg. TRI-wEEKLg.
Six months ;. go. 800 Six months 2G
One month so Three months . ;. 0I
AL communications should be addressed ID GAZETTE
Alexandria, Va"
change. Advertisements orders for the paper, news
any information or business can be sent by tee-
phone
Contract advertisers will be allowed to exceed their
space unless the Is paid for at transient rates
and under no circumstances will they be allowed to
advertise other than their legitimate business In the
space contracted for
Resolutions In memora Of thanks tributes OF respect
resolutions adopted by societies persons unless OF
public concern, will only be printed In this paper
advertisements.
Marriage aud death notices must be paid for In advance
Price fifty cents, when not exceeding six lines.
All transient advertisements must be paid for In ad
vance.
Entered at the Postorice at Alexandria Virginia, ns
second-class matter1
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18
MEDICINAL.
CODROLENE,
CREAM
Is an Infallibe Remedy for
COUGHS, COLDS,
CONSUMPTION,
BRONCHITIS,
And all Diseases OF the
rrrnrcc ANN prcp1p ArnDE nBHANS
COUGHS, COLDS,
CONSUMPTION,
BRONCHITIS,
And all Diseases OF the

LUNGS AND RESPIRATORY ORGANS.
CoDRELENE CREAM is a preparation containing
40 per cont of Pure Norwegian Cod Liver Oil,
combined with othcr harmless ingredients in
such a manner as to render the "OIL" as pleasant
to the taste as honey, yet retaining all of its well
known medicinal properties which have proved
of the highest value in CONSUMPTION and all
WASTING DISEASES, invariably producing in
crease of FLESH and WEIGHT
Il is also an invaluable preparation for Child
ren requiring the nutritive properties of Cod
Liver Gil, as it can be taken and retained in the
stomach of the most delicate person.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

NATIVE OLIVE SOAP.-Just received sup
IN ply of the above named Soap, which we are
selling very cheap.
SUMMERS S ALLEN,
iy31 Cor. King and Royal streets.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

H,ABLE and POCKET CUTLERY, Scissors
i Razors, Children's Sets of Knife, Fork an,
Spoon, in all qualities Spoons and Forks plates
on steel, new cheap article for eating houses, q
SS King street, corner of Royal.
dcc1T J.T. CREIGHTON & SON.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

SLEiGH BASKETS, Sleigh Bells, Sleigh Run
II ners, and Skates for lsdie, and gentlemen at
SO King street, corner of Royal. Acme Skates at
very reduced prices. Call aud see.
dcc16 J. T. CREIGHTON &c SON.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18
1T. CREIGHTON & SON.

RlsQUE! BIsQUE! BIsQUE Call and see
y the large assortment of Bisque Statuettes in
osssafI Ssssns at 4. A. WARFIELD'S,
assA 152 King street.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

10eA LBS. BUCKWHEAT. FLOUR received
Lou to-dsy by. Hsa39s Sc. Nl,BvRN.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-03-18

TRIENDs OF THE BOAT CLUB AND AL
L exandria Light Infantry, should call and see
Flower Stands in design of Canoe and Military
Vases, suitable as presents for respective organi-
zat;ons fdec11l SUMMERS & ALLEN.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
title. to Land IN tn. northwest.

spe,ih to tn, Boron Hearld;
Last October Secretary Teller decided that a
great number of cash entries of public lands
in Michigan, Minnesota, Wisconsin and other
Western states and territories were void.
These entries were made Upon lands with
drawn from tho public domain rs railroad
land, and subsequently restored. Secretary
Teller held that as tho lands thus restored,
were never offered for sale at public auction,
they cannot be entered by settlers under the
law until they have been so offered. The
decision created a great deal of consterna.
ton among cash entry men, and it is said
that thousands of acres of their lands have
several days a delegation representing the
cash entries i'll the northern peninsula of Mich
igan have been here to consult with members
and senators az to the best method of lcgaliZing
the sales. As n result Senator Palmer
introduced a hill in the senate to confirm the
titles of all who purchased in good faith. The
Michigan delegation in tho house will hold a
meeting to devise ways and means for passing
favorable Legislation through that end of the
capitol. 1t Is expected that other states will be
represented here.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
Reform is Necessary.

when q newly married pair receiv.
among their wedding presents si1
varieties of salad spoons, ten card stands
and card baskets, seven COTE sets, -four
clocks, and duplicates of nearly every
other article given, $ q Providence
couple did recently, it is evident, a.
Samuel J. Tilden would say, that
reform is necessary" Indiscriminate
present making to people just entering
matrimony has become a colossal nui,
sance, not only to tho giver but to the
receiver, also. It'll impossible to imagine
any burden more intolerable than being
saddled with a great mass of gifts selected
by persons of all sorts of taste, ant
often of no taste at all, making i
necessary to turn the newly established
home into a bric-a-brac shop. The
custom has become so common as to be
devoid of all incoming. and it may be
wellto consider if it is not best to restrict
it to the relatives and q few persona
friends of the interested pair.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
The Modern Engaged" Girl

In the old times a betrothal ring had
q good deal of significance. 1t was the
first ring that a maiden wore. At
present, when every young lady wears
II OR more rings. and may wear as many
as she pleases, a girls engagement ring
is no conspicuous adornment, and is not
remarked by one in every hundred of
her beholders, unless it is a handsome
diamond, and attracts attention by its
beauty. But n betrothal ring was almost
as sacred as a wedding ring, and the
girl who wore it was as good as married.
The maiden of the present day enjoys a
much larger liberty, and often makes
good use of it. She may retract as many
matrimonial promises as she makes;
may jilt six lovers and re turn their rings.
marry n seventh, and invite the six Tilted
lovers to the marriage feast. The ancient
engaged girl had to walk a rather narrow
path; but the modern engaged grill
we'll, she is a trump, and 1 rather like
her. She lives in elderly hail." and
docs as she pleases Chicago Herald.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
New Story o Garheld.

Agcntleman who knew Garfield we'll
tells a story which has never before
been published of that remarkable man.
eve were sitting" said this gentleman,
"in the office of the Secretary of the Navy,
Mr.. Thompson Of Indiana, waiting to be
heard on some matter o%froutine business,
when Garfield took his seat at n vacant
desk near by and commenced writing
with both hands upon scratch pads on
either side of him. He seemed to write
with one hand as freely Us with the
other. Both hands, in fact, appeared to
move automatically. The only differ
ence was that the lines on the tablet
written with the left hand, were rever-
sed from the usual order. The conse-
quence was that the writing on the left
hand tablet could not be read except by
an expert, or by holding UP to q light
or before a mirror. l looked at the one
written with the left hand on it's upper
side. and while the lines seemed re-
arkably uniform they conveyed no
meaning. but holding the thin paper up
at the light l saw not only that the
words written were the same as those
on the tablet written with the right
hand. but that every popularity
in the formation of a letter which
was found on the tablet was
exactly reproduced on the left
hand. The achievement was a marvel
to me, as I had never heard of it before,
although / have since heard that many
people do it. Garfield said that he
often wrote that way, whenever he
wished to preserve an exact copy OF
what he was writing without having a
copy made by letter press, and that in
this mannerhe saveda great deal Of time
without any more appreciable fatigue.
{ asked him how he got into that habit
He said that while teaching school once
he had occasion to use his right hand to
point out something and that uncon-
,%ciously he kept on writing upon the
blackboard with hisleft. Upon burning
to the black board to look at what he
had written. he observed that the writ.
ing was reversed, but that he had full
use of his left hand for writing, and
from that time he made use of both
hands. He was, in fact, completely
ambi-dextrous."
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
Only A Lime.

Young beginners in wrong-doing
never look at the end-as they might a
thousand times in the example of 9TH
ers' ruin whose first step downward wa
The very one they are taking. The des-
par which inevitably closes the In
checked career Of those who throw their
talents and the promise of their youth
away, has seldom been more afftectingly
presented than we find it in the follow
ing little life-sketch:
Less than three months ago a wreck
OF a man staggered into the Office of q
weekly-paper in eastern Michigan and
asked for money to buy whiskey.
Strangely enough the publisher was al
old school-mate. They wero appren-
tees in the same town. They worked
side by side as finished compositors.
One had sobriety and thrift-the other
had q good heart and M open hand.
twenty years made the one rich and in
f1uential-the other o drunkard who of
ten slept in the gutter. The one had
made use of what God had given him,
but the other had deliberately made
himself a wreck.
The meeting called up q host of rec
elections, and the contrast between
their situations was SO great that the
old drunkard was sobered as he realized
1t. he was offered work, but he had
become too broken. The stick and the
rule were nc longer for him. He was
offered o temporary home, but he looked
at his rags and felt his shame for the
first time in months. When money was
handed him he waved it back and said
Il shall not want it. I ask III the
name of olden days and as q fellow
craftsman, y little favor"
1T shall be granted"
when You know that [ am dead thor
turn e rule for me and give me a singl.
line"
The promise vas made and the ole
wreck foated out again on the curren'
of life, borne here and there, and feel.
ing that death was to be the end. Yes,
terday o copy of the weekly reached the
Free Press with proof that the editor
had fulfilled his promise. He had
turned a rule for the poor wreck, unt
had given him q line:
Died, September 81, 1882, George
White"
That was all, but in thnt line was such
liver. For every word there was q yea
of woe and degradation. For every
letter there were tears and heartache.
and promises and tailures.-Detroi.
Free Press.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
Every Person q Lunatic Now and
Then,

Prof David Swing says: The fact
that a druggist of this city has ended q
human life by putting up the wrong
medicine awakens much indignation.
He says many customers were in the
store; he was in a hurry; he put up
morphine instead of some similar drug.
The inquiry arises whether the clerk is
able to fill an order only when he has
no customers in the shop? How empty
must be the shop in order to secure
safety? Must the street in front of the
drug store also be empty? What if a
fire engine goes by? What if a dog
fight occurs while the druggist is reach
ing for quinine? Is he justified in TAX
ing down strychnia? What if his moth
er-in-law has come to visit him?
Such questions come up and proper
ly; but there is another side to the fact
of erring druggists, and that is, that
most persons are crazy part of the time.
The exceptions are rare. Each n is
now and then q fool of the most COM
plete order of species. All the law and
penalties in the world will not avail to
make a druggist or anybody else have
his full senses through all his life.
Crazy moments or seconds will come.
A wise man will step backwards off a
porch or into q mud-puddle, a great
philosopher will hunt for the specs that
are in his hand or O his forehead,
hunter will sometimes shoot himself OF
his dog, q barber will some
times forget his job and slice off a piece
of a chin or an ear or the nose. A girl al
work at Marshal Fields had been feed
o great clothing knife for 10 years
Last week she watched the knife come
down slowly upon her hand. Too late
she woke out of her stupor with one
hand-gone. For q few seconds hel
mind had failed and she sat by her ma
chine q temporary lunatic and hac
watched the knife approach her OWL
hand.
The man recently murdered on Nortf
Clark street, of Chicago, saw the enem,
come up with murder on his face, saw
him draw a revolver, and, instead OF
making q lightning spring at the man
he stood bewildered and thus fell dead
His reason left him in the second O
his greatest need
One of the most distinguished profes
sors in one of our colleges was teaching
near q canal. Walking along one even
ing in summer he walked as deliberate
ly into the canal as he had been walk
ing along the patch n second before
He was brought to his senses by thu
water and mud and the nbsurdity Of thu
situation. He had on q new suit o
clothes and q new silk hat. but though
the damage was thus great he still laugh
over his adventure.
Our mail collectors find in the irol
boxes along the streets all sorts of paper
and articles which have been put in b.
some hand from whose notions tn
mind has become detached for a second
A glove, q pair of sp~ectacles, a deed,
mortgage, a theater ticket goes in ant
on goes the person holding on to tn
regular letter which should have bee1
deposited. This is called absent-mind
edness, but this is q brief lunacy.
%lunatic is q person whose mind is habit
ually out of balance.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
The Faro Passion.

Speaking of faro and other wicked
games, o Virginian, after remarking
that in the be tier days of the republic
when everybody played faro, a gentle
man was distinguished by the comment
"He plays with red checks" from the
poor white-cEip trash, dwelt upon the
passionate love for the game which pos
sesses men who get into It's clutches.
"Years ago" he said, two of the finest
lawyers in New Orleans on their way to
New York stopped at Charlottesville,
Va, because they heard there was q
man there who dealt faro. They found
the man and played all night. About
midnight one lawyer whispered to the
other Hes cheating Hush! said the
other; I've known that for two hours
but there isn't another faro game with
in fifty miles. "-Philadelphia Record.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-01-30
The Wise Mother-in-Law
ON the Burlington Hawkeye

%4chA
She meeteth her son-in-law at the
door when the new clock tolleth four
teen, and he ~essayeth to let himself into
the hall by unlocking the front gate
with his watch key. And for this oftimes
he feareth her.
She knoweth his ways and his tricks
are not new to her. She is up to all his
excuses, and when lie sayeth he was de-
tanned down ut the bank until the next
morning;
Or, that the last car had gone, and he
had to walk;
Or, that he was sitting up with q sick
friend;
Or, that he was looking for his collar
button;
Or, that he was drawn on the jury;
Or, that he had joined the astronomy
class;
Or, that his books wouldn't balance
Then doth she get onto him with both
feet, for she sayeth within herself
"All these things hath his father-in-law
said unto me, for 10, these many years.
Lo, this is also vanity and vexation OF
spirit"
And for this he feareth her yet moro
and more.