Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1885-10-02
OUR KALEIDOSCOPE.
All at sea-whales.

All at sea-whales.
paint me as | am" MARBLES poetess.
She certainly is not read.
Robert j. Burdette has been elected an
associate member of the First National
Guard of Pennsylvania. He will be killed
in the next sham battle, sure.
An exchange has long article on "The
Race Problem" We thought the Puri
tan had settled that question for good.
MANY overskirts are slashed only Oh
one side this season. says a fashion
writer. Evidently IA mispriut Tor splashed.
Beauty draws us with IL single HAIR,
as the poet has remarked but after IT,
honeymoon is over she draws Us 10y TIA
handful.
''Sin Was H." is the sign over Chnc-
shop in Socorro, New Mexico. Undouh
eddy true, but the verb should be in til
present tense.
A fashion paper announces that low
necked dresses are to be dropped at I'll,
opera next winter. This sort OF thing has
been done so often on the stage that it ought
not to be SO very shocking in the audience
The jim jams to the iuebriate-"S Shake,
old boy :"
This country is ne asylum for all OPP
pressed. Remember this, henpecked hus-
bands, and be resigned
The Car of Russia sleeps every night
with his pet dog. We don't wonder that
his subjects want to kin him.
"What are the sources of natural gas p
asks IA contemporary. We have never dis
sected a book agent, but would like to
hear from somebody who has
A Missouri contemporary thanks a
friend for sending "a basket of superb
grapes, sweet as the honey of IIybla and
dusky as the cheek of Il daughter of the
upper Nile" Type seems to be cheap in
Missouri
| In Genoa, the policemen wear silk hats
and carry silver-headed walking sticks
Genoa seems to be the only place where Il
| policeman can look as big as he feels.
Congressman Curtin of Pennsylvania
thinks Congress will not touch the tariff
question next winter. Let's draw the
Curtin on this painful subject.
The Detroit Free Press thinks General
Sherman would be popular as president OF
Vassar Possibly, but wouldn't the gen
eral get kind of tired kissing the same
girls for four years right along
The Georgia legislature consumes IN
gallons of mineral water daily Thos,
who are unable to account for the state
ment, will please recollect that Georgia i.
now prohibition State.
An exchange says that literary activity
in the United States is on the increase
Nearly every well appointed newspaper
office is now equipped with dog trained
to hunt poets at sight.
Semi-military discipline is to be intro
duced at Nassar college. We presum,
this means the broom rill,-good matri
monial discipline, anyway
An English physician says that the us,
OF dynamite tends to produce apoplexy
We guess the doctor has been deceived. 4
man does lie very quiet after fooling will
dynamite. but it is not because he ha
apoplexy, 1t is because he is dead.
SONATA PATHETIQUE
Andapte con Sentimento.
Moonlight summer John-Janc;
Tipping rivers.,-fragnnt lane;
Trembling sighing-vow kiss
observation-disclosures.
Allegro ma non troppo.
Morning. autumn urchmring,
bridegroom happy-brlde lar;
Fitness wondrous-fortune rare.
Romeo Capriccioso.
Winter dreary-ove fown
John--club- Jane alone
River irozen-lane cold
Vows turgotten--story told.
Boston Transcript.
Sherry flip is recommended in cases o
= sea sickness. The advantage of it is tina
, the sherry tastes just as good coming NJ
AS 1t does going down.-LOWeu Times.
Philadelphia is pleased to discover tina
she has thirteen more pie factories thai
= Chicago, while her death rate is not quit
30 large. If the pies wont do ii VIII
: doesn, she use Calling gun.-DctrOt
Free Press.
"What was the trouble at church thi
morning ?" inquired one Dakota citizen q
r another Il understand there was a row.
4 ION, II didn't amount to anything
, Some of the members in the back pew
/, threatened to shoot the minister unless h
/ spoke louder. That was all "-Lue.
A Pennsylvania man committed suicid
rather than take some physlc ordered b.
| the doctor. 1t is supposed he was in
: hurry and couldn't wait.-S0meTUut
/ journal.
1 If flowers cannot speak why is the flol
list always wiring them S-BoSton Post.
A The King OF Denmark has wart on hi
+ chin, but no jester in the kingdom has ye
e found the courage to ask, "Wart of it ?
-SOmerDule journal.
In telling what mothers should do, a
5 exchange says, "Allow the children, a
they grow older, to have opinions of thei
! own" Wonder what kind of childre