Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-01-08
RED NOSES.
There Arc -Four Kinds, bat Only One sure
Remedy.

Many gentlemen of correct habits
and proper morals, who are members
of the Young Mems Christian Assocla-
ton and sympathiZe with the prohibl-
tionists. are afflicted with carmne-tip-
ped noses OF so brilliant a lustrc as to
drive the casual obserycrto The conclu-
sion that they are dissipated and aban-
doned reprobates. Nothing can be
more disheartening to man whose
principles have led him to abstain to-
tally from all Intoxicating liquors than
10 be pointed ont as a horrible example
to the rising generation in the streets,
only because an inscrutable Providence
has bestowed on him a red nose. One
of these unfortunate individuals driven
no doubt to desperation by the scOrn OF
the temperate man and the jibes OF the
small boy whom he meets upon the
thoroughfares of the metropolis, yester-
day advertised as follows in daily pa
per;
A liberal reward viii be paid for a remedy
that viii cure "a red nose ON "a person OF Eood
habits.
DR.. William stevens, Of No. % West
Thirty-iirst street, was questioned up
on these phenomena by reporter OF
the Times. Red noses, " said the
physician. ray be divided into four
classes There is the WHISKY red nose,
which is often cultivated by its owner
with rs much pride and attention as he
devotes to the coloring Of his meer-
schaum pipe. Some men are proud Of
red noses Just rs others are OF black
eyes artilicially black but these per-
sons are not ornaments to society NOR
ally any more than they are physically,
as a general thing. OF course, the only
kind Of remedy for this kind of red
nose is to abstain from the use OF alco-
holic beverages. 1t all depends upon
whether young man will sacrifice his
appetite TO his appeara ce. The second
class of red noses the kind Of a nose
that may be associated with the fea-
lures of Il gentleman who does not use
liquor is produced 10y emboi,m; that
is, by the stoppage or obstruction OF
bloodvessels in the end of the nose,
causing the blood to remain there.
This may be cured by pricking with
long needles and letting the blood out
Does it hurt? Oh, no, OF course not;
it's aa very pleasant operation, like
pulling teeth.
The third class OF red nose may be
called the caucerous diathesis nose
which is caused by the cancer and can
only be cured by the cure OF the cancer
The fourth class of these red noses
the red nose that is most common to
men and women of good habits, as
The gentleman who adyertises says-iS
the red nose produced by superficial
capillary circulation in the veins and
arteries Just below the surface of the
skin These arteries are SO minute in
their normal condition that they will
not receive the red corpusclcs in the
blood, and therefore no redncss is APP
preciable when the arteries and skins
are healthy. The rcdncss is caused by
a disorgani2ed condition of the capil-
laries. The minute veins become en-
larged and the red corpuscles are adj
mitted and show through the skin.
The only cure for these noses is climate,
diet, and cXercise-a regulation of the
system Some people whose noses are
red in New York would find them the
color of the rest of their skin in Florida
ar al the North Pole, and the people
whose noses are red in those places
might find them cured in a climate Ike
this. The only sure way to cure any
red nose is to adopt the plan of the
gentleman mentioned by Sam Weller,
who cured his little hoy of squirting by
cutting his head OIL. ~ l. Times.