Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-04-29
staid. prim Miss Penelope in The sweet
faced placid little lady who rules DR..
Eherburne's house.


AAO AIWu WluOW UlsCUSS0S t09 VQoTlty
Ball.
"Av coorse, Mrs. McGlaggerty, I
needn't ax ye aff ye wor there" said
the Irish widow to her neighbor, as
both sat in the latter's kitchen looking
into the glow that Allied the open 'front.'
Of the cooking stove.
"Where2" asked Mrs. McGlagksrty.
"At the charity ball. at the Pickwick,
lasht Chuesd'y noight?"
"Well, thin. ye may be sure that
was mott" said the neighbor, somewhat
crustily.
II thought IS mooch." said Mfs. Ma.
googin, @but axed the HUSTON be way
~ introducing the subject, do ye see3
| had no oidea av maxim game av ye,
Mrs. McGlaggerty, or av insini-
watin' that ye warn't uv'ry bit - gud
as amy wan was there, Bless your
hart, / wasn't widin q moile av it me.
sill, 90 ye sec that's how IL il, an me
only lntsnt.ss was to say TO ye, be-
chune ourselves, that ito quare kind
~ charity that Kin parade in dol.
|llls sAss!ly sl tsilsa ccsss ! I van Z: !
niEns 9! - wv
365 days cut down Tie pocf AllHJ \!
gerls' wages, widout sayin' annythins
av the Seggars that's. dhriven' from
their dures an left to shtarve in the
sthreet Let me tell ye, Mrs Nc
Glaggerty, that the charity that il dh-
pensed at foive dollars tecket goes .
very short ways. It's the serkus sthoyle
av givin', wan-ring show andher .
three-ring tint. There's o great dale
av hooray an paper but divil the mooch
av it anywhere else. read . great
dale about the charity ball an the
foine ladies an grand gintlemin that
was there. / read about the doimonds
an the silks an the satings, an fwhin /
did SO I bethought mesilf Nv q poor
family in the big Ashley buildin' down
an Broadway belyow, that's near
deaths dure from hunger an sickness,
an sez to meself, 'mebbs aft I'd take
this paper down there to thin
poor crathures and read to
thin all this foine wroitin.s that
mebbe it 'ould I'll their stomachs an
cure their disaysesP Av coorse,
wasn't fool enough to do anythin' loike
that, me frind. only thought it, by
WY Nv OOuAAiAuty uu tHlA IHuSAc0 "
mesilf to think fwhat fools the wur.
ruld was med up av. A lot av. society
ducks an darlints makes up their
moinds to have . nights enjoymint.
They know they'll have to pay for it
anyhow, 80 fwhat does they do but
impose an lot av poor musicians an
others, an give foive dollars ticket
two or three hundred av thim-to'rds
feedin' 1000 shtarvin' souls Let me
tell you, Mrs. McGlaggerty, that it's
not the min that wears shwally tails
or the wimmin that has their doiminds
that helps the poor. No. indade, it's
thin that's poor thimsel' an that
knows the pangs sv disthress an pow
erty as helps the craythers that are
more anfortnit. All that the poor IL
uver get out Nv hoigh-chooned charity
balls they kin put in their eye. I'm
poor meself, an nuver expect amy
help from such quarther. No, nor
divil a wan av me 'ould accept it,
aither. AT the worst comes to the
worst wild me. Mrs Glaggerty, as it's
loiable to do wild anywan, Ill just take
that ould steamboat clock av moine
down from the kitchen wall an
rattle it aft fur 30 cints . chance
I've done it foive tonnes already.
The lasht tonne it was ratified Are
thoosy's beau wan it an wanted to
take it away wild him home to his
moother's boordin -house, but / tould
the bandy-legged little Dootch divil
that if he dar'd to do as mooch as lay
his hands an it I'd brain him an the
shpot, SO he tould me I kud kape it.
Nuver moind, me frind. we'll have o
foin tonne wild that same clock yet
afore it goes, ST Louis Critic.