The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1867-188?, 1885-04-15
A DEVASTATING MAN.
The Colored Preacher Who Was
Gastronomically Gifted.
He Is Forced to Listen to Few Forcible
Remarks From an Outraged Parishioner
who Was Being Eaten Out of His
Substance and Feared Famine.
Arkansas Traveler.l

Black Anthony looked up from his plate.
His attention had been attracted. The
pastor OF Snake Greek Church was sitting
opposite Anthony. 1t was this gentleman
who had caused Black Anthony to lift his
eyes, not by any remark, but by move
ments Of the arm. He was storing away
''viddults" in a "scan'lus" manner.
"Brudder John, yer's got putty good
appetite, amt yer"
"Yas, thank de Lawd."
"Uh huh, appertite is er mighty fine
thing. Monstrous fon' o. cabbage, amt
yer Brudder Johnp
"oh yas, brudder."
'rUh huh. Whar yer gwine ter drap In
naixt, Brudder Johni At whut onfor-
tunate brudder's house Is yer gwinter In
terduce yer improved system o. earthly de-
structlon."
"Whut yer mean. Brudder Ant'ny~
"bTain't 'uth while ter Ak whut yer
means,n replied Anthony. "Any pusson,
eben wild de mos unergener9te eye, can
git down on yer calculations o. 'vastation.
II IL want so 'spensive, I'd like to watch
yer. likes TO see er hoe cake o. bread hug
de plate an sweat wild anxiety. I likes ter
see or piece o. middlin' meat shake wild
great fear when er man makes pass at 10
-yas, likes ter see all dis Of de pervisions
Is furnished by some udder man, but ips
sick'nin' ter de mental feelin's when er
hard.worked pusson secs his viddults
leabln' him In slch or rush."
"w'y, Brudder Antny, pse 'stonished
at YER"
"Uh, huh, I reckons so, but notices dat
yer aln't lettin' dat cabbage erlone. sees
dat yer 'stonishment amt half ez strong
ez yer appertlte."
"Yer ought ter be ershamed o. yerse'f,
Brudder Ant'ny, talkin' ter er ole sarvant
o. de Lawd In er manner like dis. Doan'
dc Bible say dat yer mussent muzzle do OK
whut treads out de grain"
"Dat's all berry well, Brudder John, but
do bible doan' say yer must fling or fox In
de coop wild de chickens. Like fur yer ter
pint out de place where II says dat one OK
mus cat oil de grain whut anuder OK
treads out. Las week yer come roun'
heah an made de ole red rooster turn
pale; now yer comes back an makes
eberything sca'ce Yer puts me In mine,
o. er FIRE In er sage grass fie'. Yer doan'
leabe nuthin' berhine yer. Ef yer could
lift out dat appetite o. yourn an take 1t
ter market, some rich man wouP gin yer or
hunnered thousan' dollars fur It,"
The preacher showed back his chair,
wiped his greasy mouth and was about to
make an indignant reply, but his longing
TO chew something being stronger than
his resentment, he subjected the cabbage
to another destructive visitation and re-
malned silent.
"Doan mine feedln' er hungry man."
continued Black Anthony, "but when er
whirl'-win strikes my table, I gifts sorter
oneasy. / likes yer preachin' well ernuff
but dc trouble Is yer doan do ernuf o. It
Opens yer mouth, It's true, but yer allus
shuts It down on suthin' whut doan long
ter yer. I started up dis heah resterunt
fur de purpose o. maxim q libin' Of possi-
BILE, but hahn here ter keep out dc Sheriff
much longer. Yer's allus willln' ter take
anything but or hint No wonder Pse er
sad man, weighted down wild er big bum
die o. kere Look heah, now, git up frum
dat table. I'se stood yer ez long ez Pm
gwlneter. Amt yer gwineter git upf WIN
Ihafter put desc heah hans on YER"
"Brudder Ant,ny, Pse sorry ter hab ter
hurt yer feelln's De cause ode Lawd Is
suiferin' In his heah country. Who keeps
dat eatIn' house ober darw
'Brudder Wilson White. He longs ter
church."