The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1885-02-21
THEY WEIGH HEAVY.
1t Must be the Result of the GIOrioH
Climate of the Pacific Slope.

1t Must be the Result of the GIorioa
Climate of the Pacific slope.
Near by were number of ladies viii
their escorts. They were being weighed
and short, stout, little man was al
iusting the scale.
''Now, Mr.. Cheeseman, said tie
lady who was standing on the platform,
mind you be very exact. l weighed
one hundred and twenty-five pounds Up
in Red Bluff, only two weeks ago, hit
I've been running round so much sine
came down, that l suppose L NUT
have lost a little"
81 will be as careful as if it vas
sugar." said little Mr.. Cheeseman, with
precise dignity; "here's your WEIGHT,
madam, exactly to an ounce"
well, what is it?'
Zone hundred and forty-three pounds,
five ounces and one-tenth of an ounC "
Goodness aliver' shrieked the olt-
ragged lady; "what do you mean, sip"
Il mean Just that. You can see or
YOURSELF" responded Mr.. Cheesemn,
tartly.
Yes, Mrs. Rollins" spoke the otter
ladies, inspecting the figures, lies
quite right-one hundred and forty-buI
pounds, nearly"
ITS perfectly impossible" exclaimed
Mrs. Rollins, wrathfully, flouncing of
the platform, che did something to tt
scales; I'm sure he did" .-----s
''Miss Minnie" said Mr.. Cheeseman,
briskly, ''its your turn"
Miss Minnie was a neat little creature
of about eighteen. She carried on hel
arm gossamer, and her dainty little
high-heeled No rs were eneased in a
pair of rubber sandals. She dropped
the arm of her escort-a young man
with a straw moustache whom they
called Charley mounted the scales.
Charley weighed me last, over in
Oakland, she said giving that youth a
tender glance, land l only weighed
ninety-seven. Didn't l, Cbarley?"
'Humph!" calculated Mr.. Cheese
man, dryly, 81 should think Charley
ought to be able to tell your weight off,
hand, without going to the scales. But
-let-me-see-why, young lady, you
must have been feeding up since you
were in Oakland. One hundred-and
fourteen pounds three ounces, just. y
"Why, you-horrid thingH'
gasped Miss Minnie, looking round on
the rest appealingly.
Its there, large as life, exclaimed
Mrs. Rollins, finding balm for her
late discontinue, ''and you look every
bit of it
''It's these rubbers and this water
proof, " said Miss Minnie, ruefully; Il
shouldn't have kept them on. But
anyway, / think he does something tC
the old scales on purpose"
Next" said Mr.. Cheesman, shortly
Come, Mrs. Perkins, step up; it's YOU
turn
mo, thank you, d." replied the lady adj
dressed, Pm not feeling very wei
to-day, and | think I'd rather wait"
80, come, come! What difference
does that make? Come on and bt
weighed"
NO" answered Mrs. Perkins, coldly
and firmly, II don't care to be weighed
to-day"
And then the other two ladies who
had not been weighed yet started off
and the rest of the party, except an ole
gentleman, followed after, leaving Mr.
j Cheesman standing in mute surprise al
the scales. Finally he turned round tc
the old gentleman and said, shaking
his head quizzically:
Its always the same way. If womer
do lie about one thing, next to theil
age, it's their weight. Now, they'll jus
hate me all day, Might have known it
too; confounded fool! l lost the fines
girl in the State of Indiana, same way
twenty years ago. / was just fifty
pounds ahead of her alleged weight
before a whole room full of people; anC
the scornful look she gave me as sh'
got down off those scales will follow m,
to the grave. "-2he MgleSjde.