Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1885-10-16
RISE AND FALL OF THE ROLLER HIHglST.

In obedience to wild Wagner
ian snort from the orchestra, came
forth into the arena with my skates
in my hani. / feel perfectly at
home before an audience when /
have my skates in my hand. 1t is
a morbid desire to wear the skates
on my feet that has always been
my bette n0ir. VIII the office boy
please give me Il brass check for
that word so that can get it when
90 away?
My first thought, after getting
myselt secured to the skates, was
this: 'Am / in the proper frame
of mindl Am doing this in the
right spirit? Am | about to skate
in such way as to lift the fog Of
unbeief which now envelOps a sin.
ful world, or shall ! deepen the
opaque night in which my race is
wrappedY
just then, that end Of the rink
erupted in a manner so forthwith
and so tout ensemble that | had to
push it back in place with my per-
son. | never saw anything done
with less delay or less languor.
Tue audience went wild with en-
thusiasm, and responded to the
encore by writing my name in the
air with my skates.
This closed the first seance, and
nv trainer took me in the dressing
room to attend a consultation of
physicians. After the rink carpen-
ter had jacked up the floor a little,
! went out again. | had no fears
about my ability to perform the
mechanical part assigned me, but
| was still worried over the ques-
tion Of whether it would or would
not be of lasting benefit to man
kind.
Those who have closely scrutiniz-
ed my frame in repose, have ad.
mitted that was fearfully and
wonderfully made. Students of
the human frame say that they
never saw such a wealth of loose.
ness and limberness lavished upon
one person. They claim that ma.
ture bestowed upon me the hinges
and joints intended for a whole fam.
lily, and therefore when / skate, the
air seems to be perfectly lurid with
limbs. | presume that this is tue,
though | have so little leisure while
skating in which to observe the
method itself, the plot or animus
of the thing, as it We're, that my
opinion would be of little value to
the SCIENTIST.
am led to believe that the roll
Ter skate is certainly great civil
izer and a wonderful leveler of
mankind. If we SO skate thai
when the summons comes to seek
our ward with the general nos
pital, where each snail heal bis
busted cuticle within the walls
where riukists sQuirm, we go not
like the moral wreck, morally par.
alyzed, but like uired man taking
his medicine. and so lOrth-we
may skate with perfect impunity,
or any one else to whom we may
be properly introduced by our
cook.
Skating on the roller skate is
like riding on the railway train. If
the management is good aud We
behave ourselves, we feel safe.
Rinking in and of itself is not dan
gerous from a moral point of view
with good associates and solid
road.bed we are safe. So it is also
in travelling. If our rink tickets
are good in a well conducted riuk,
and our railway tickets read over
the Great Rock Island Route, we
have done wisely, and the rest re.
mains with us. We may wreck
ourselves in front OF the engine, or
injure ourselves morally and phys.
icalIy at the rink if we wish to.
There are many, however, who
are not agitated over the rink
question, To such it might Doe as
well to say that the Rock Island
Route is still carrying people with
comfort, elegance, economy and
dispatch.-Bill Nye, in Cart Pret.
zePs Weekly.