River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1885-09-10
PAYING THE PENALTY.


PAYING THE PENALTY.
Nineteen years of utter loneliness,
and to-day have been told there will
soon be relief and rest for me, the re-
lief of stilled pulse, the rest of the
grave.
Have one regret, one hold on life
too strong to relinquish?
Not one.
You, to whom | write, have lived at
Knowlton, though it is nineteen long
years since YOU went from me, and
you know how beautiful the grand old
house and the wide grounds are, how
large the income that keeps them in
perfect order.
1t is forty-fve years since | was born
here, and where was orphaned when
| was three days old.
My grandmother adopted me, giving
me my mothers name, and I grew up
to the proud place of heiress of Knowl-
ton, educated privately at the utmost
care and expense, with my naturally
naughty disposition, fostered by flat
terry and injudicious counsel, till | was
seventeen.
was far more of woman then, in
sef-possession, pride and matured
beauty, than many are at twice that
age.
had presided over my grandfather S
house since | was a mere child, with
housekeeper and servants entirely
under my control.
Adjoining knowlton was the Barcla 7
estate, rivalling my own home in
beauty, and it was pet scheme of my
grandfather that | should fascinatc
Louis Barclay, and by my marriage
join the two finest estates in the country.
Louis Barclay was five years older
than myself, and | remembered him
only as boy, for he was sent abroad
to be educated when was but nine years
old.
Still, l had my day dreams of this
possible sutton until my seventeenth
year, when Horace Grierson came to
KnowltOn.
Ny grandfather, feeling the intirm-
tiles of age creeping upon him, adver-
tised for a private secretary and com
panion, for we were very poor in
relatives, and Horace Grierson was the
applicant chosen.
Let me describe him to you, and let
me say word here of my own appear
ancc.
You remember me only as an aged
looking woman, great invalid, pale
and wan.
But at seventeen | was tall and slen-
der, witha profusion of deep auburn
hair, large, brown eyes, fair, bloom
ing complexion and perfect features.
was lady by birth and education,
heiress to a large fortune, and of a
warm, impulsiye disposition, held ever
in check by my master passion,
pride.
Horace was a poet, with large, blue
eyes, waving, golden hair, effeminate
in feature, but with the wide, full brow
of intellect. soft voiced and gentle.
He was an orphan, he told my grand
father, hoping to win laurels by his
pen, but forced to curb his poetic fer
vor, to earn his bread in some such
! position as the one offered him at
Knowlton.
! We were not lonely in those days.
The grand old house was always
| filled with summer guests. and in the
winter we varied the frequent visits to
town by balls, concerts, private thea
tricals and other social gatherings at
/ home.
! 1t was but natural that | should be a
belle at all such festive gatherings.
could enhance my beauty by the
most costly dress and Jewels, | had
musical talent, and the yivacity natur-
al to unclouded girlhood.
! Suitors were not wanting for Miss
Knowlton, but turned scornfully from
all
| And yet, the one who never forced
attention upon me the one who held
aloft in quiet dignity, the one who never
seemed to think of love, was winning
from me a lifelong devotion.
Every day, in the familiar intercourse
of our home circle, found some new
charm in Horace.
I Even his delicate, refined beauty be-
came lovelier to me than the more
manly attributes of my admirers.
He touched depths of my nature ]
never knew existed till they sprang to
! life under his musical voice, and
found myself wandering with him into
fields of poesy and imagination, COM
pretending his inspirations, suggesting
new subjects, absorbed as himself in
visionary dreams.
Every day the exquisite beauty of
my grandfather secretary became
more exquisite, the great blue eyes
more spiritual in expression.
1t was in early summer ! awoke from
my dream.
Horace and had few interruptions
/ in our walks and talks for several
weeks, for was resting from the win
| ter gaities, before the house filled with
summer visitors.
So we two rode, drove, walked and
talked. while my grandfather nursed an
attack of chronic trouble he had had
for years, with the housekeeper as his
attendant.
But one morning he sent for me-
He was in fearful rage. and even ]
not upaceustomed to his fits of furious
temper, was frightened by the glare OF
his eyes, the thunder of his voice.
1t was soon made apparent what had
excited him.
Horace had pleaded his love for me
and asked permission to win my love.
Frightened as | was, my heart bound
ed with a proud JOY to hear that.
| But it soon sank again.
In terms not TO be misunderstood,