davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
The Man Who Won't Pay the Printer.

We clip the following from an
exchange and judging from the
way i'll which our brother editor
comes down on 'em, we are inclined
to think he has been "bit" on sew
eral occasions.
May he be shot with lightning
and be compelled to wander over
gun powder.
May every day of his life be more
deSpotic than the Dey of Algiers.
May he. never be permitted to
kiss handsome Woman.
May he have sore eyes sand a
chestnut bur for an eye stone.
May he be bored to death with
boarding school Misses practicing
the first lessons on music without
the privilege of seeing his tormen-
tors.
May five and forty three and Il
half night mares trOt quarter races
over his stomach every night.
May his boots leak, his gun hang
fire and his fishing lines break.
May his coffee be sweetcned with
fleas and his sauce seasoned with
old dried black spiders.
May he he troubled with bed
bugs and mosquitoes every night.
May he never strike oil, and be
continually blessed with nothing.
May his cnttle die of murrian
and his pigs destroy his garden.
May his friends ruu off with his
wife, and his children die with the
measles and whoopIng cough.
May a troop Of printers devils,
lean, lank and hungry, dog his
heels each day, AMI u regiment OF
cats caterwaul under his window
each night.
May the famine stricken ghost
of an editors baby haunt his slum-
bers, and shrek murder in his
sleeping ears.
May his COWS give sour milil,ansl
churn rancid butter, in short, may
his daughter marry IL one-eyed edl-
tor, his business go to ruin, aad he
to the-Legislature.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
A Wife Auction.

Tie Annual Register for 1882
gave an account Of IL singular wife
sale. Joseph Thomson, a farmer,
after Il brief married life of three
years, finding that the union was
irksome, agreed with his wife to
separate. Acting upon the pre-
valent notion that by putting his
spouse up at auction, and so part
ing with her the married bonds
were legally nnloosened, he came
to Carlisle with her, and by the
6ellman announced the sale. At
noon the auction commenced in the
presence Ola large number of per.
sons; the wife, ii spruce, lively dun.
sci of about two andtwenty years
Of age, being placed gu IL large oak
chair, with Il halter Of straw around
her neck. Thomson then spoke as
follows: "Gentleman, 1 have to
offer to your notice my wife, Mary
Thomson, otherwise Williams,
whom [ mean to sell TO the highest
and iaireSt bidder. Gentlemen, it
is her wish, las well as mine, to part
forever. She has been to me only
"a born serpent. l took her for my
comiort and the good Of my home,
bnt she became my turmentor. IL
domestic curse, II night invasion
and Il duly evil. Gentlemen
speak truth from my heart when /
say may God deliver us from trou
bleSome wives and frolickSOme wo-
man! Avoid them as you would a
mad dog, IL roaring lion, Il loaded
pistol, cholera morbus, Mount let
ma, orany other pestilential thing
i'll nature. Now, | have shewn you
the dark side Of my wife, and told
you all her faults and failing<: l
will introduce the brightand sunny
side of her, and explain her qualf-
cations and goodness. She can
read novels and milk COWS; she cal,
laugh and weepwlth the same ease
thai you could take Il glass Of ale
when thirsty. She eau make but
ter and scold the maid; she can slug
Moore'S melodies and plat her fl'ills
and caps; she caInotmile rum, gin,
or whiSkey, but she is Il good Judge
OF the quality from long
experience in tasting them
| therefore offer her with all her
pertectiohs and imperiections for
the sum of 5Os.' This man must
have been IA lumoriSt, and if he
had turned his attention to the pro-
iession of anctionrcr would have
run the famous George Robins pref
ty hard. The sequel OF the story is
that after waiting about All hour
Thomson knocked down the slot"
to one Henry Meals for COS. and a
Newfoundland dog, and the parties
separated. being mutually pleased
with their bargain.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
Praise the Boy.

1t often costs one quite a struG-
gle to do his simple duty; and wien
one does his simple duty i'll spite of
his temptations to do dliferently,he
deserves credit for his doing. One
has no need 60 live long in this
world, before tin.lingont thistruth.
\ bright little boy about two and
a half years old, recently showed
that he appr-hended it. He was
on the eve of doing something that
was very tempting to him.
"No, my son; you mustn't do
that" said his father.
The little fellow looked as # he
would like to do it in spite Of his
fathers prohibition; I,utle ilinnirIi.
ed over his inclination, and ans
werel, resolntely:
'All right, papa, [ won't do it,"
There was no issue there, anu
the father turned to something else.
The boy waited a minute, and then
said, in IL tone Of surprised inquiry:
Papa, why don't you tell me,
That's good boyF"
The ta6lier accepted the sugges-
ton and commended Nilsson accord.
ingly. A just recognition OF
child's well.doing is Il parents dn-
ty; even though the chlld's we'll
doing ought not to hinge on such
recognition. And, as with little
folks, so with larger ones. just
commentator is every ones due.
Even our Lord himselthas promised
to say, "Weil done,' to every loved
one of His who does wells. s.
! Times.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
Fduca.cd Girls.

Is the man OF tn: period shy of
the educated girl Of the period?
that is the question Must the pop
ular plea for the high education of
females encounter the objection
that Il woman who has read Virgil
aud the -Eneid in the original, and
is posted on the difierential calcu-
luS, Is therefore, and in direct con
sequence, more unlovely? Il is
stated. on what looks like autl0ri-
ty, flat ont Of 500 graduates of
VasSar College, only ISS have mar
rcd since that climax Of career
or course, in the CASE of some, only
a year or two has elapsed; but
most of them graduated years ago.
and some Of them are old maids of
the deepest dye. What is the mat
ter? 1t cannot he that they are so
mattractive as to have had no
offers. Every Gill has her Jack
sometimes il whole platoon OF them,
and every girl can get married if
she will Does intellectual train
ing make girls l;lstidious, finical,
perIlaps-tliliicult TO please, un.
wiling to accept the honest bands
ofantl sincere hearts Of youths less
brilliantly veneeredg
1t should not have this tendency;
for i'll most of the bappiest mar
riages in the land the bride has
nearly all of the education. AS our
industrial and social machinery is
at present managed, the girls have
Il better chance than the boys to
study; the wives than the husbands.
So, Notwithstanding the fact that
the most profound scholars of our
time are chiefly men who have had
a long, and severe professional
tlaining,a majority oftbe educated
people of the country are women.
Thousands of men who make the
best of husbands-not only kind,
umiable and tender, but shrewd,
intelligent aid thoughtful-know
nothing Of any language but their
own. and never in their lives used
'.were" to interpret the subjunctive
mood. Armies of girls have made
IA mistake in this matter, unwisely
scorning IL sutton who spelled sep
alate" with three els, OF who said
sit Is me-" but WHO might yet be a
tender hearted. sagaclous and even
mentally profound man, worthy Of
all exception.
In fact, we are by no means Ger
tain that educated and professional
men make the best husbands. They
are less likely to keep regulur
hours, and more likely to talk
shop" anil to establish the ever
lasting shops in the home than are
mercantile men, or brokers, or bank
ers, or clerks, or railroad managers.
They are more likely to beabStract-
ed. even when their hands are not
occupied.
Girls should remember that men
of genius or of oversladowlng lit
erlry talent, have seldom made
successful husbands. They almost
always lack domesticily, aud love
IDEAS better than their wives
Look at Shakespeare, VIM lived at
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
ACC0NAC G. q. "a. SATURDAY., FEBRUA RY 1885

staid at home with a teething ha.
.by, reported that Mr.. Lindsay had
not gone home to write his sermon,
but bad walked straight into SUI
Sans kitchen, and helped her seal
up the preserve jars and set them
await, and had sat in the front
porcII, an hour or two afterwards
with her-when he might have
been with Notwithstanding sc
:. cular poetry, and not DIR. Watts
or Charles::Wesley, either, the par.
ish rose. il It's wrath To won H.
This would never do; Lncretia must
not be tritlcd with. Mr.. Lindsay
had inspiEea hope in her gentle
heart; .he must marry Lucretia or
leave the 'parish.G2
"You sec," explained Mr.. Phelps,
1--WE want to settle you, Mr.. Lind.
say. You. suit IL: to a I. bit it
kinder. seems as if .you ought to
propose to .Lucreriis Shaw, you've
been so attentive"
''Propose to Lncreti~ 'Shawm re-
peated the young man, with a
startled ar. "NVhat- has that to do
with settling me? Is every clergy
man who comes to Lennox obliged
to-propose to Lucretfu Shaw as a
preliminary preparatiGl?"
.: "Weh:ifo. not exactly,,'l&nghed
Mr.. Phelps, 'snot unless. he's given
the parish reason to expect it
You know we don't want the cred.
it OF settling a philandering parSon
who makes love right and left. Pa
no idea the thought would be new
to you, bur the parish has set IFS
heart on the matclls you see, and
ne wouldn't like to see a man, II he
was eloquent in prayer, who'd trifle
with the affections Of one Of the
tlCck, you know"
''But, my dear sir,'' said Mr..
Lindsay, "I'm not at all in love
with Lucreti, Shaw. You wouldn't
have me perjure myself"'
"Not in love with LucretlaY Tne
parish won't believe its own eyes
again, reckon"
"Well, said Mr.. Grimm, severely
.swe conldn't think of settling a
preacher that hadn't no more prin
ciple than.io throw over Lucretit
Shaw alter taking tea so much to
her house, and raising her hopes,
as it were.".
..Pcrhaps," said Mr.. Lindsay, af-
ter a pallsc-"pcrhaps you will be
able to forgive me for not propos-
ing to Lucretia when | tell you that
have already proposed to Susan.
You see, it would complicate mat.
tiers il little if were to acceGe to
your wishes. However, | have late
IL received "A call from a Western
parish, and should feel obliged to
decline the Lennox parish, even if
You had thought me worthy OF it,
as this other furnishes a wider
field of usefulness"
'Ard large salary, I suppose"
added, Mr.. Grimm.
"And larger salary, allowed Mr..
Lindsay. "Dollblr. in fact.
II suppose" persisted Miss Rich,
after tile w,ql'llg-''I suppose LII
crctia must s.:,ve refused nm tirst.n
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
Wise Words.

Despair and postponement are
cowartlice and defeat. Men were
born to succeed, not to fail.
The family and friends of the
drunkard Shonld be protected from
the shame and dangers of his drum
kennesS.
Paste it in Your hat that people
of the highest position and great
est Importance. as a rule, make
the least trouble.
The more able a man IS. if he
makes i'll use OF his abilities the
more dangerous Will he be to the
commonwealth.
Let lis begin our heaven on earth;
and being ourselves tempted, let us
he pitiful and conSiderate and gen
erous in judging others.
Teach self.denial and make its
practice pleasurabe. and you ere
ate for the world destiny more
sublime than ever issued from the
brain of the widest dreamer.
The most influential man, in a
free country, at least, is the man
who has the ability, us we'll a. the
courage to speak what he thinks
when occasion may require it.
Man is continually saying to wo
man ..Whynre Won not more wiSeW
Woman is constantly saying to
man. "Why are you not more low
inggn Unless each is both wise
and loving, there can be no real
growth.
Speaking truth is like writing
fair. and comes only by practice; it
is less Il matter of will than OF hab
il: and it is doubtful if AIRY occasion
can he trivial which permits the
practice and formation Of such d
habit.
The gentle progression and
growth OF herbs, flowers, trecs,gen-
tie and yet irrepressible, which no
force can stay, no violence restrain,
is like love that wins its way and
cannot be withStood by any human
power, because itself is divine
power.
Orr powers are limited. No one
ever saw the whole OF anything
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
SAY A KIND WORD.

What were life without snme ono to choor us
Will n word or smllo OH our way?
A friend who Is faithfully nonr MS,
And needs not what offers may say!
The bravcst OF spirits have ofion
Hnlrfuilcd In Tho race thnt they ran.
For Kind word lifc's hardship 10 soften.
So SAY IL Kind word when you can.
Each one OF us owns 10 some failing.
Though some may have more Than tho rest;
There's no good III hcelc4sly railing
'Galnst thosu who are striving their best.
Rcmomhcr. word said complaining
May blight every effort and plan
A kind word would help In htlnlnns.
So saya kind VOID wlicmyou can.
Oh. shy kind word. thel,. whenever
Twill make tho heart cheerful anu glad;
But ch.uly-forect IL. oh. newer
To ono who Is hopeless AMI sad.
There's no word 81 easy IN saying.
Subcgln. II you have not began,
OH never lu life be delaying
To say Il kind word when you can.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07

however simple it may appear; and
the more complex the object, the
smaller the fraction that we behold.
if we but realize this fully, it will
go far toward dispelIinS prejudice
and broadening our outlook.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1885-02-07
steamer EASTERN SHORE.
Steamer TASGIER.

Steamer TASGIEK,
CAPT. r. II. WILSON,
Tuesday aud Friday for Crlsicd. Flnney's
OnancocS, Pitts Wharf, Cedar Hall, Rchoboth
PoromoGc City and Snow Hill.
Returning Leave Snow Hill every Monday and
Thurslaynt II. m. touching nj the above land
lngs 1T the usual hours.
AL Steamers leave Crisfeld for Balti-
u more. on arrival of last down train.
Freight and passengers received for AL points
on the y. V, phiia. and Norfolk, wIcomlco and
Pocomoke. and Delaware. Maryland and Vir-
gn!a Railroads.
Positively no freight received after p, m.
and must he prepaid to all points. except
on the y. Y. Phia, ana Norfolk Railroad
p. R. CLARK. General agent,
I03 South Street. Baltimore.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
LincoIn's Message of Peace.

ST. LOUIS, October 13.-rhe Globe
Democrat will to morrow print the fol-
lowing: A number of personal friends
were discussing some of the incidents of
the late war. One of them spoke of
Lincoln's aversion to bloodshed, and in
illustration, said that he had it from a
member of the Cabinet of the war
period that Lincoln, on his return
from the Hampton Roads Conference,
IN February, 1865, proposed to his
Cabinet to submit a message to Con-
gress giving to the Southern States an
amount of money equal to the probable
cost of the war from that time to its
close, on condition of their laying dow n
their arms and returning to their
Globe Democrat, hearing of the converse
ton. sent memorandum of it to Hon.
J. P. Usher. who was, at the time re-
ferred to, Lincoln's Secretary Of the In
terror, and is now a resident of Law
renee, Kansas, requesting him to
state his recollection as TO its
correctness, From Usher's reply, which
was received yesterday, we make the
following extract: "SOOn after his (Lin-
coln's) return from James River, the
Cabinet was convened, and he read to
it for approval a message, which he
had prepared to be submit
ted to Congress in which
he recommended that Congress
appropriate $500, 900. to be appor-
toned among the several Stat ia pro-
portion to the slave population, to be
distributed to holders of slaves in those
States, upon the condition that they
would consent to the abolition of slavery
and the disbanding of the insurgent
army, and would acknowledge and sub
n it to the laws of the United States.
The members of the Cabinet
were az opposed. He seemed some.
what surprised at that, and asked
How long will the war last?" No one
answered, but he soon said: "A hun
dred days2 well, we are spending now
in carrying on the war s. zoo, 600 day
which will amount TO all this money,
besides all the lives" With a deep
sigh he added: But you are all OPP
posed to me, and 1 viii not send the
message"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
Editor stead's Trial.

LONDON, October 3O.-The trial of
Stead, editor of Pail Mall Gazette, and
the other defendants in the Armstrong
abduction case, was resumed to-day.
Justice Lopes, replying to question
from the Jury as to when tho case would
end, said they might as well ask the
date of the day of judgement. Charles
Russell. counsel for defendants, init
mated that the defense would close
their side of the case on Wednesday
next. Mrs. Rebeeca Jarrett, one OF the
prisoners, then continued her testimony.
Mrs. Jarrett. being pressed by Justice
Lopes to answer certain questions dur
ing the cross-examination, swore that
Mrs. Armstrong allowed her daughter
TO go with her for immoral purposes
without having any idea as to what
amount of money she would get. She
denied having conducted herself i'm
morally with the husband of Mrs. Anne
Broughten, but admitted having sent
him an immoral message. Justice
Lopes cautioned Mrs. Jarret against
not testifying honestly. Mrs. Jarrett
admitted that her letters contained
and said Mr.. Stead gave her
E10 to procure Eliza. She believed that
the Lily" of the Pail Mall Gdzette's
story was Eliza Armstrong, Mrs. Jar
rett broke down under the cross-ex-
animation.
Mrs. Jarrett said she had once kept
brothels, and had procured little girls
for immoral purposes. The witness
here broke down and wept cOpiously,
being unable to proceed for some
minutes. At the conclusion of her ex-
the court adjourned.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
END OF A BAD LIFE.
The Armstrong Abduction
Case.
THE TRIAL OF EDITOR STEAD.
WOman's Christian Temperance
Union-The Daily Collision
Turf Talk.
THE TRIAL OF EDITOR STEAL
End of a Bad Life.

BoSToN, October 3O.-J. N. Talbot
alias Otto Funk, aged q, was found
dead in his cell this morning in the po-
lice station at Old Cambridge, where he
had been arrested for stealing books.
He had committed suicide by taking
poison. TalbOt's career has been a
downward one. While a student at the
university at Chicago, he endeavored,
by laying train of dynamite, to
blow up the buildings ana destroy
the college generally. at the same
time he had been stealing books
from the Chicago Public Library and
for both of these crimes he was brought
into the court of justice. On the ground
of insanity, he was sent to the asylum,
from which he escaped soon after. This
was a year or so ago. At the opening
of the divinity school at Harvard Tai
bot presented himself for admission,
having with him veral letters signed
by many influential men of Chicago.
The letters all bore the date of 1885, but
a close inspection reveols the fact
that the FIVE was forged, the
original date ing 1888. This
being the time of his admission to the
university at Chicago. For some time
DOCKS nave been missing from harvard
library, but not until now could the
culprit be definitely placed. Serge. Mt
Hartmann yesterday found in Nor
toms Woods at the rear Of the Agassiz
museum, sacks containing $50 volumes,
all bearing the stamps of the library.
At Sawins express Office in Harvard
Square was found twenty-five more vol
umes tied up and ready for shipment.
Other stolen property was found which
he had taken from the physician.
When discovered this morning the BODY
was still warm, lying crossWise upon
the bunk; upon the floor of the cell was
a piece of yellow paper, upon which was
written:
Mr.. PeabOdy-Will you please for
ward my trunk to my sister Bertha
label. AZ West Blackhawk Street, Chi
cago?" There was no signature.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
The Cattle question

DENVER, October 3d. Santa Fe
special to the Tribune Republican: A
special meeting of the Territorial Stock
Growers Association convened in this
city to-day. The association represents
the live stock interest of New Mexico,
embracing over 1000, 900 head of cattle.
valued at $50 ,000, 900. President DIVERS
address suggested the reorganization of
the association upon a broader basis
He said the subject of protection
against contagious diseases demands
prompt and decisive action. He
pneumonia from its Introduction
into Europe a hundred and twenty
years ago and pronounced it the
range of the cattle business from Bri.
fish America to the Gulf. 1t is a fatal
disease from which no animal RECEIVERS,
beside which the sO-called Texas fever
is insignificant; hence an efficient quar-
antine should be maintained against it
the year around. He also referred to
the importance of measures to prevent
the overstocking of ranges. The COM
mittee on resolutions was instructed to
report plan for the organization of
the National Range Association to en-
brace all cattle ranges west of the Mis-
sissippl River. This Is q movement
looking to the secession from the Ma
tiOnal Drovers' Association. It is pro-
posed to make this an entirely western
association, with headquarters at pro-
minent points in the far west.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
A Rogue.

WAsHINeToN, October 3O.-Edward C.
Balm, messenger Of the National Metro
politan Bank of this city, left that in
stitution early this morning to make
the usual daily collections from other
city banks. In few hours he returned
and informed the cashier he had lost a
wallet containing the money he had
collected, amounting to $50, 100. Before
informing the cashier of his loss Balm
drew from the bank $500, which
he had one deposit there and handed
it TO his sister to whose house he had
gone as soon as he missed the money
and who accompanied him back.
The money was S10and notes. Although
Balm claims to having lost the pocket
book containing the collections, the
general supposition is that it was
stolen from him by some
clever pickpocket. He claims
to have taken the 'pocketbook from
his inside coat pocket and put it in his
hip pocket, while in the city postofice,
where he went to get the mail when he
had made all his collections and to have
missed it after he had gone about a
block from the postofice. Balm has
been IN employ OF the bank only few
months. He is cousin of Balm Bros, of
the defunct Exchange Bank of Norfolk,
Va. He was taken TO the police head
quarters and put through severe ex-
animation and then allowed to go. The
bank offered reward of 80 500 for the
recovery of the money.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
Under the Registry Law

New YORK, October 30.-A case has
arisen under the registry laws of the
State which may lead to some compli-
cations in case the coming election
should be a close one. West Chester
adjoins New York and, in accordance
with the provision of the election law,
all voters must register. There has been
no registration i'll the town this year,
and to-day was the last day of registra-
ton in the rural dist lets. There is no
opportunity to remedy the error, if one
has been made. The inspector of ele :
ton is ia doubt about their right to use
last years registry.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1885-10-31
Gas Fixtures. at Little. Roundy & q
eounod,s Greatsst Work.

ST.. LOUIS. October 30.-Gounod's new
oratorio, Mors ell VIOLA, was produced
for the first time in America at the new
Musical Hall. tonight under the direc-
ton of the Theodore Thomas orchestra
and Miss Emma Juch, Emily Winant,
Chas. Turner and Myron W. Whitney,
soloists. The audience was one Of the
most brilliant ever seen in st. Louis and
numbered fully 1900 persons. The
oratorio was received with great enthu-
siasm and pronounced the grandest Of
Gounod's works. The rendition to-
night was of character leaving little to
be desired. The chorus was strong and
exoellently drilled. and the soloists
were all in good voice. Thomas ex-
presses unqualified admiration for the
new work.