Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1885-02-06
HUMOROUS.
What He Got;

What He Got:
Soft blue were her eyes and lustrous,
Her breath was the breath of the South.
He kissed that girl on the forehead,
And got bang in the mouth.
IL hope you are not, cutting a
friend" said u neighbor to the farmer
who was scratching the back of pet
pig with stick. Bristling up with in
dignation, the soil-tiller replied: mo,
sir, Pm only scraping an acquaint-
ance."
A young dude, who persisted in
smoking in ladies' sitting-room at a
railway station, was fired out of the
apartment by gentleman, who re-
marked: when there is so much
smoke there must be some fire. ~ Y.
Independent.
NO." said the dying punster, with
q grim smile; mo, l don't object to
flowers, but don't have any violets,
please. shouldn't care to have my
grave violated, you know" 1t was
Immediately agreed that it was best that
he should go. Boston Transcript.
-"rm going to Cn' she remarked,
rs she commenced to climb up the
vocal scale in manner which, if not
musical, was progressive. II hope she
may be lost" murmured the young
man on the sofa to himself as he stopped
up both ears and edged toward the door.
Detroit Journal.
-"What in the world are you staring
at that young married couple so intent
ly for?' asked one young lady of an.
other, in railroad train. "Oh!' ex-
claimed her companion with start and
sigh. SITS so natural for us girls to
contemplate matrmony, you know"-
burlington Free Press.
Bob saw the pale outlines of the
moon in the daytime and told Rob
about it. "Oh, no" Robprotest sted; ''you
can't see the moon till dark. "Oh,
yes." Rob persisted; "and there it is"
WELL" said Rob, rs he caught sight
of it over the tree-tops, sit isn't lighted,
anyway. .''-GOlden Days.
"A lady advocating woman suffrage
recently brought down the house with
the following argument: Il have no
vote, but my groom has. l have a
great respect for, that man in the
stables, but am sure if l were to go to
him and say, John, will you exercise
the franchisep' he would reply. Please,
mum, which horse be that?' '"-Er-
change.
I--"By thunder if that girl don't t
bring my breakfast pretty soon,. I'll
give her piece of my mind,n growled
an irate boarder. "It will be the worse
for you, if you do" said quiet board
er on the other side of the table. 'Td
like to know why" "For the simple
reason that if you give her piece of it,
there won't be enough left for a sam
pie. "-Merchant IrdUeler. 'r
-"Aunt Jane, is it quite true that a
lady may ask a gentleman to marry her
if It is leap yearP" Eyes, my dear;
quite true" "But if he don't want to
marry her. Aunt Jane, what must he
do thenp" HE must give her a new
black silk dress, my dear, and then she
understands. "Oh! Aunt Jane! Aunt
Jane! Now know why you haYe SO
many black silk dresses. lille Judge.
1t is related that many years ago a
Mr. Morgan, who represented West
meath in the House of Commons, when
on his first canvass called on Father
Mooney, an influential priest, and
asked him for his vote. The latter re-
piled: "Sir, I'd rather give it to the
devil" "But," said the candidate, sin
the event of your friend not coming for.
ward for the county, what thenp" He
got the vote. Philadelphia Record.