Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1885-09-18
How Old Nose Counted Eggs.

Old Nose, who sells eggs and chick
ems in Austin for living, is as honest
an old negro as ever lived, but he has
got the habit of chatting familiarly with
his customers, hence he frequently
makes mistakes in counting out the eggs
they buy. He carries his wares around
in small cart, drawn by dimlnutive
donkey. He stopped in front of the res
I idence of Mr.. Samuel Burton. The old
lady herself came out to the gate to make
the purchase.
"Have you any egg. this morning,
Uncle Nose? ?" she asked.
Eyes, indeed has. Jest got In ten
dozen from de kentry."
care they freshG"
al gua'ntee 'cm. l knows dey am
fresh jess de same as ef had laid 'em
myself"
'I'll take nine dozen. You can just
count them into this basket"
"All right, num-" lie counts, "0ne
two, free, foah, five, six, seben, eight,
nine, ten. You kin rely on dem being
fresh. How's your son coming on at
de school? He mus be mos grown"
"Yes, Uncle Nose, he is clerk in
bank at Galveston"
"Why, how ole am de boyy"
''He is eighteen"
"You don't toe me so. Eighteen an
getting salary already; eighteen
(counting), nineteen, twenty, twenty
/ one, twenty-five, twenty-free, twenty
foah, twenty-five, an how's yore gal
comm on? She was mos growed up
Ge las time ! seed her."
"She Is married and living in Dallas"
"Wall, | declar'. An you say she has
childruns? Why, how ole am de gal?
She must be jess about"
"Thirty-three."
cam dat so? (countingl firty-free,
firty-foah, firty-fye, firty-six, irty-
seben, iirty-eight, firty-nine, forty, for
ty-one. forty-two, forty-free. Hit am
so singular dat you has grandchildruns.
You don't look more den forty yeahs
ole yerSef."
Nonsense, old man, | see you want
to flatter me. When a person gets TO be
ffty-three years old"
"Fifty.free? | jess don't gwincter
believe it; fifty free, ilfty-foah, fifty
five, tiftv-siX-I want you to pay ten
shun when | counts de eggs, so dar'll
be no mistake-fifty-nine, sixty, sixty
one, sixty-two, s;xty-free, sixty-foah--
Whewl Dis am warm day. Dis am
de time oh yeah when feel Use gittin'
old myself. l amt long fer dis world.
You comes from an old family. When
your fodder died he was sebenty yeahs
old"
"Seventy-two."
"Dat's ole, suah. Sebepty-two, seb-
enty-free, sebenty- ioah, sebenty-fve,
sebenty-six, sebenty-seben, sebenty-
eight, sebenty-nine-and your mudder!
She was one OBJ de noblcst-looking la
dies | ebbcr see. You reminds me ob
her so much. She libbed TO mos hun
dred. l 5'lieves she was done pass
centurion when she died."
"No, Uncle Nose, she WAS only nine
ty-six when she died."
"Den she warn't no chicken when she
died. know dat. Ninety-six, ninety
seven, ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one
hundred, one, two, free, foah, five, six,
seben, eight-Gar's one hundred and
eight nice fresh eggs-jess nine dozen,
and heah am one noah egg in case l has
discounted myself"
Old Nose went on his way rejoicing.
A few days afterward Mrs. Burton said
to her husband:
81 am afraid we will have 10 discharge
Matilda. | am satisfied she steals the
milk and eggs. Lam positive about the
eggs, for bought them day before yes
terday, and now about half OF them are
gone. stood right there and heard
Old Nose count them myself, and there
were nine Dozen"