The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-09-04
STAGE DELUSIONS.
SOME or THE TRlBuLATIoNS OF
ACTORS AND ACTRESSES.
The Property" Bottle OF Champagne
Macbeth's suppositious Golden
Beaker"- The Missing but
Very Necessary Paper"

[Rose Eytinge in New York world.l
great deal is said from time to time
about the require ement3 of the dramatic
nuances and the mise-en-scene and the
scenario. and divers other things that are
about as clear and convey to the average
mind about as much as the universal In
struction OF the Cookery Book to the young
housewife to take q rennet' But there are
not many people who stop to think how diff
cult 1T is for the actors engaged I'm the scene
to keep up the illusions of that scene-not
only to the audience, but to themselves
Take, for example, q scene suppose to rep
resent q delightful little supper, where the
characters are seated about the table and
are supposed to eat like gourmands and
there is nothing on the table to eat aMad.
anne, permit me to assist you to some of the
pate" and there Is placed on the plate Of
the unfortunate actress piece Of property"
canvas. or a piece Of hard, dry bread that
has been kicked around the property-room
"of and on for about six weeks; or the gay
young bachelor invites his friends to adrown
dull care In a bumper Of champagne" and,
suiting the action to the word, as all actors
are continually told they ought to do. no
fourishes bottle that to the uninitiated looks
like a veritabls bottle of Veuve Cliquot
But alas! the young bachelor who at
this moment Is not gay" knows only
too well that the bottle contains weak cold
tea in which has been placed some "fzzing"
ingredient which persistently refuses te
3tzz," and that the cork Is covered with
bit Of tinfol which has just been removed
from the paper Of chewing tobacco now
reposing, denuied Of its brilliant wrapper,
In the hip pocket Of the property man.
/ remember once, while "enacting one
Camille, presiding over feast which con.
sisted Of three apples conspicuously placed
In the centre of the table in q child's In.
verted straw hat "aanksd" by a round
block Of wood painted white to represent an
icei cake, l fancy, but which would not
have deceived q child Of years Of age
anl of the meanest understanding, the whole
"raunded Off by the inevitable bottle OF
bogus champagne, which refused the faintsss
sCzz' despite the efforts Of the eight
COMEDIAN" though they threatened either
dislocation OF his right arm or the bursting
of a blood-vessel in his head.
And who has not seen Macbeth atoastn
Banquo in supposititious golden beaker,"
evidently block OF wood on which had
been carelessly pasted some thin gold leaf
that "peels of" like boys back after he
has "played hockey" or gone in bathing at
HooH III now we'll 40 F6m6ul'
Ter, one night, when. seated on my throne
in "queenly state" urged upon Macbeth
the advi ibilty Of making an effort-like
Mrs. Dombey-to induce his friends to feel
at home, and when, in response to my mar.
ital and royal suggestion, he had made the
effort, and in the course Of his remarks re-
GREETED the absence Of Banquo, the wrath Ct
that usually much-murdered gentleman ap-
pears and Macbeth himmeiiatelybids him take
himself "hence," and in his agitation flung
the beaker above described over his head II
caught young party who was representing
one Of the lords in waiting just on the nose.
Whatever Banquo did the damaged courtieI
certainly took himself "hence" very hur-
riedly and with both hands most patheti.
cally caressiny the wounded feature. As
for the audience, the subsequent proceedings
interested them no more.
And when the hero Of the piece Is to find
in a secretary or some other articls Of furni-
ture the will that is to enrich the lovely
maiden OF the drama, or the document that
Is to clear his fair name from the foul blot
that now blemishes II when he turns "up
stage" In a peroration full Of the noblest
sentiments, Looks in the drawer supper left
side," (where it has been settled at rehearsal
only that morning after much warm discus
sion between the stage manager and the
property-man that IL should be placed and
when he Is just about to eTolaim SHAT what
Is thisp And when the audience are all
leaning forward, eager. breathless with ex-
pectation, he discovers 1t is not therei-who
among that audience oan understand the
mingled emotions that GIL the breast Of the
hero as he says aloud, as IL In soliloquy,
@My beloved fathsrI" or "My sweet Maudsl"
as the case may be, and in a sepulchral
whisper, uttered IN a wild hope that soms-
body @at the wing" may hear and in charity
bear to the frisnd-othsrwiss known as the
property -man-but which commands not
the slightest attention from anybody "at the
wing" but which Is heard with perfect dis
tinctness by every individual In the audi
snce. "The paper! The paperP
These minor considerations may not have
anything whatever to do with the mi,e-sn-
scene or scenario, but they are very weary
inc In the actor