Orange County observer. [volume] (Hillsborough, N.C.) 1880-1918, 1885-07-04
STRAY JOKES AND DASHES.
FOUND ~ THE HUMOROUS COLUMNS
OF OCR EXCHANGES.
The Babies pirIares-Thc Bride Had
Aenith-A Blot-The Name DID 1t-pan-
Geroms te Oser~leep. Etc, Etc.
THE NAME DID IT.

Margaretta StelgerNaiueHReE auu
1eorgiana Warner, who live in Pike
county, went out for walk. While
passing along the road they saw rattle
snake lying in the roadway. One OF
the girls threw stone at it, and it i'm
coiled itself and showed fight.
Miss Steigerwaldenzer picked up club
and accepted the challenge
.Oh. MarSaretta Steigerwaldenzer =
cried Miss Warner. Don't go near it.
1t will kill you -
Al that the snake uncoiled itself and
hurried away. Miss Steigerwaldenzer
followed it, and, over.aking IT, killed II,
the snake showing no further inclina,
ton to defend itself. 1t vas three feet
long, aud had only four fattles.
How quickly that snake lost its
tierceness, said Miss Steigerwaldenzer
to Miss Warner
Yes" replied Miss Warner. ut :
heard me speak your name and knew
then that there was no use.
The two girls are still friends. ds.-Ner
YORK Sun.
MILLIONS N IT For MIlKMRS.
Sharp Inventor "Ics, stree I've
struck it at last De Won see thatmo,lel
of a pump? It's my own invention"
Friend = Looks to NE like an ordinary
pump"
well. yes. there's nothing novel
about the pump It's the name I'm
going TO give it that I've go. patented.
There's millions in it."
Don't see what~li.erence n name can
make. What are SO. gong to call it? p
"Tho A.2erIry pump. Thifadct. ,
phia Coi'.
THE BRIDE HAD WEALTH.
Uncle Nose approached the County
Clerk the other day to obtain marriage
license. The clerk, in order to poke
fun at the old man, said seriously:
81 hope the bride has got seventy-five
cents in cash, for the Legislature has
passed a lazy forhiddirg us to issue
license unless the bride has tha,
amount.
jess GO ahead wild de papers, boss"
said Uncle Nose, approaching the clerk,
and then he leaned over and whispered
in his ear, 'dar's reliable rumors about
a dollar and a quarter. ."-Arkaasau
1rarcltr.
DANGEROUS TO ovERsLEEP.
Did yon hear the dog bark and howl
last night q
eyes, my ears were greeted with the
canine symphonies. / could not sleep
because of them"
els the dog useful animal?''
"Oh, very. His owner keeps hin.
tied in the backward, and the dog en-
Joys life SO we'll that he barks or howIs
81 the time Thus the ne,ghbors arc
kept from sleeping too much. 1t is a
sad and dangerous thing TO ovorsleep."
-lhicogo Lcdgcr.
TIE PICTURE.
She Thanks so much for giving me
this opportunity Of seeing your Academy
picture, MIR. McDuffer-and good by e
Hc-"Deiigllted TO have seen you. /
suppose you are now going TO see
Smythes picture, over the way?'
She-"Oh, no. ] shall zee that At the
Academy. you know !"-Fameh
Boy Please, sir, Tommie johnson
has made me make big blot"
School Board Teacher-'T Tom
ME johnson wcn't 60 home To his lin.
ner today"
Tommie said a.ta-ward. when the
teacher had gone away: Il 'sroge W,
think yer done a fine thing by rouuGin'
on me, but, as it happens, amt go. no
dinner to 90 home to. Yat, yer sneak =
-Jud.Y.
! THE C.EFULsEss Or TWO ANIMALS.
They NAV talk about goat being 4
nuisance, sir" sa:d one passenger 10
! auo:hcr Oh arl> elevated train, "but If i.
were not for that auin1a! | would not be
So we'll off "A ! am.
Then infer that you arc il he kid
glove business, sir? -
No. sir; l an circus POSTER
printer.
"Aha We'll, l mast say :hat owe
a great deal TO 2 much E4aleGe., ANIMAL
the cat.
Are yon furrier: z ~
"Oh, 70; ia2au:2ctaEe boo'jacks,
e!t. -, trn1L
AHLg 20 PAT y.
We'll. " remarked me diTerce lawyer,
'~hat Gl:mony do vo1-~ant?" 2"
Il think 500 go c-st4 and al income
Of s3n, go = year beslles s@"yers' iee-
i,wou.d ou.y l,= fair, rep.lei -as .aly,
Pair. madam I" answered the lawyer.
in surprise. What bnsinees Is y>as
husband iaf'
lie OWLS asia;iBg INK. = Grapijc.