The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1885-09-02
WANTED, A DRESS SUIT.

A HUMOROUS STORY FROM TIE GERMAN.
'By Jovel that miserable tailor is
enough to drive a man crazy" cried
Judge Henry Winker desperately, not
knowing whether to curse or laugh He
paced the room as he spoke, like a Gagged
animal. Poor fellow His anger was
not unreasonable MS he strobe up and
down the limited space, his hair dressed
and pcrlumed, aud attired in shining
patent leather boots, linen faultlessly
,laundricd-b there our description
must cease, and we must not further di-
late on the bridcgrooms apparel. Yes.
Henry Winkler was to be married at 12
O'Clock, sharp, to his adored Aurelia in
one OF the most fashionable churches.
Inc tailor had promised him to deliver
MS dress suit at his apartments at 10
o'clock, and now it was quite IL 80, and
Mr.. Winkler stood arrayed in spotless
white and there were no signs of swal-
low-tail anywherel
do you know what would dor"
ventured an ofiicious groomsman. who
had come to escort the Judge to church.
would just put on my morning coat
ana start at once. | do believe that
TINS will be the very best thing you can
do Just now"
Bring me hatiul of last years hail.
but pray do not mention my morning
coat, nor put in a plea for my trousers y
cried Winkier laughing wildly. Zone
can see the sunshine through my coat;
and leaving out such trines as style and
cut, my trousers, which were black ten
years ago, are now of such n hue as to
be totally indescribable. Man is always
laughable object when he is getting
married, even at his best; but if / array
myself as you suggest | am half afraid
that Aurelia would say NO instead of
Yes when we meet at the altar"
but what is to be donel" urged the
groomsman. "What can you doi 1t is
getting late. Did you not saw that the
tailor saidl0 o'clock See, it is II 80"
cried Charley Held, nervously.
"He certainly said 10 o'clock" the
judge answered, solemnly.
"Wcll suppose we send for your dress
suit9" said Charley.
What are you dreaming of" returned
the judge. at would take more than
an hour for any messenger to get from
here to the tailor shop"
"Iou are right, sighed Charley. "But
tell me what was your reason for order
ing your wedding clothes so late9 They
should have been here week ago. Why
were you so fooIish2"
II was foolish 10 trust to that beast of
tailor. l always put Off things until
the very last moment, and now am to
be punished, ] suppose" and Henry
Winkler threw himselfi into an arm chair.
'Look at my new dress suit" said
Charley Held, smoothing his coat down
in front of long dressing glass.
doesn't it fit me well7 Oh, / was
smarter than you, judge, for my dress
suit was ordered in good time and sent
home a,week ago. | had it made ex-
pressly to wait on you"
''Your lecture may be very amusing"
groaned the judge, "but it fails to keep
me out of this muddle."
Suddenly the judge bounded up from
the armchair, grasped the astonished
Charley by the shoulders, and looked at
him fiXedly, while he cried:
''But you can help me if you will, old
fellow. see that you can be of the
greatest assistance to me in this, the
moss threatening moment OF my exist
cnce."
a." answered the surprised friend.
'What on earth can l do TO help YOU
now2 | cannot see my way"
'But you will see your way. Look in
the glass, my dear boy. See how we
stand-as much alike in figure as two
peas"
"Well, what of that?" asked Charley,
as the judge devoured his figure with
his large brown eyes
'Dont you see, my dearest friend,
how you can help mel Why, you must
lend me your dress suit so that can
hurry and get married, " the judge said,
impetuously.
"What could Mr.. Held do He gave
one long, despairing glance at his tall,
fl figure in the glass; and thought of
the charming Bertha. whom he, as best
man, was to escort to the altar. Alas
he had contemplated this pleasure for
weeks, and now he was to be undressed,
like naughty boy, in the middle of the
day He was angry with himself that
he had strutted before the glass aud
called the judges attention to his dress
suit, but some one had to suffer, evil