The Nevada picayune., 1885-02-12
num OROUs.
Our Picayunes.

II IS never tOO iale to Hcnu any thing except the streets.
 Coal will not come down in price until the Ohio lets it come down in bulk.
 Cigarettes are now made by ma chimes, but it requires silly boys to smoke them.
 Faith-cure doctors get the dead wood on the druggist and also on thor victims.
 When both wear long hair it is dhfcult to tell the difference be. tween qnack doctors and quack poets.
 When the Liberty Bell is turned over to the Expositiosa manage ment it will make seme sort of sound.
 Ignorant men employ quacks. When the donkey is i'll he sends Sor the horse doctor.
 Some machines that have been made to take bread out of the mouths sf the poor are caTN d labor saving machines.
 Carl Schurtz is marching through Georgia with lecture on "Mod- ern EducatiOn." He wants to come to New Orleans.
 The Lycenm School of Acting in New York teaches actors every style of acting, except walking mp to the box office for salary.
 Card rates on nails by the keg have been advanced. The thing to know is to stick the cards on kegs without nails.
 There are no more counties to hear from. Washington advices state that the electoral returns are now in.
 Sarah Bernhardt is retrcnching and has moved into a smaller house She is certain that all her creditors cannot get in at once.
 The principal pawn shop in Mex. leo is owned and run by the Gov ernment. Making an ofceholder of one's uncle is bad case of nep. otism
 Very few teachers attempt to rule their pupils with rod of iron; but a stick about five feet long is a handy thing to have in the school house.
 It is only poor people who need to be polite. A woman in New York, worth s4O, ,Oo0 in her own right can eat pie with a knife with. out disgusting dude.
 Gail Hamilton has written a pa. per, called "English Kings in a Nutshell. It is time something other than wormholes should be found in nutshells.
 A friend of Ireland's cause S needed who is brave enough to blow up O'Donovau Rossa with d; namite. He robs the weak and disgracos the strong to the glory of Rossa and the shame of the Green Isle.
 The price of a window view for the inauguration is said to be from e2O to $50. with the prospect of still further advance. This will cause a window pain in many pock- cts.
 The Boston Post rings in this; Philadelphia is going to send so many men to New Orleans along with the old Liberty bell that one is forced to think that tho old bell is still giddy.
 New York Tribune: It was rather keen satire the late Miss Sarah Ellen Smith indulged in when she provied in her will that her niece should profit by Dequest only on condition that she marry a man who neither drank nor smoked. In the testators opinion, a man who can afford these luxurics, can keep a wife without the aid of money.
 bio Lewis said he had no difficult ty in getting into barroOms in any part of Iowa His friends will be glad to hear that, for man who has systematically abstained from rich food must have his drinks reg. ular.
 Mir. Talmage thinks a lamb sleep. ing in the mouth of a cannon is a suggestive thing. It suggests that at least, that the cannon has a large mOuth.-ICourier-J ournal,l There was no need of opening the large month question again in con- nection with MT. Talmage.
 The Illinois Legislature, quarrel