Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1885-10-24

e At Gle Telephone.
The Butcherb ayes man, we can
send you the fifteen cent ltcak and the
irish potatoes"
The Preacher: aOh, dear. hardly
know how to use this instrument is
that you, Brother Brown You must
be at the PRAYER meeting Tonight N
, expect you to help me OUT n
, Baseball Artist: "Say, Billy, we juStA
chawed them other fellows up Tlev
fouled out right along Did YOU hear
about my three haggcr2p M
Policeman: There's a man down
here who is badly beaten up. Send
three or four officers to help me arrest
him"
Young Miss: sob. Mamie. yon iust
ought TO have been NJ the lovely party
last night I wore my new silk
dress, aud Willie Was there, and I
made Jennie Maroon iealeus. and
| danced FOURTEEN times and we had
the loveliest supper, and--you hateful
Exchange, whit did you cut us of
| for ~
Old Bachelor: @L0ok here. | want
to know whethsr ! can get l317 with
out walking duwn and seeing him?
How does It cilme that my wire always
gets crossed What's that you say,
Exchange, thalit's because I'm a crab
bed old bachel3s? I'll have revenge
for -"
Vile: ~Yoii say you won't be home
to dinner9 Ididnt know the lodge
held meetings in the daytime
Lawyer: 81 don't see how the Judge
could have decided that the oorpes tle-
tictt was minor issue before the ultra
Uires question"
Young Man: "That you, ChawleY
Heard about you last night, but won't
give it away. met one of the min
strel men last night, and we hal four
teen drinks. He's dandy singer.
How do you feel? Yes--iust SOL
feel that way too. tn, ia. SO long
Reporter: Is that man who was
shot through the lung and heart ex-
pecied to liveY II he dies beiire 3
o'clock this morning let me know"
Cook; as dat you, Alexander?
Well, declar, how cnrous yo' voice
do sound froo dis here telephoRe hel
hel Amt it funny. I'll go to tle Sal
vation Army wild you, ob course.
Old Maid: "Well, [ hope you can
hear what / shy now I'm yelling
loud enough, goodness knows"
Dude; "Deah me Miss Angeline,
| caan't pwomise to be out, don't you
know. i have so many engagements,
don't you know, that I CANT tell what
I'm going to do next"
School Girl: II had big fuss with
The teacher to-day, and up and told
her that she didn't know nothing, and
hat could spell heap better than she
could, anyhow, there~
Dressmaker: "rm sorry the dress
lidn't suit you. It's just what you or
Tered, and II you don't know what
you want, I'm sure I'm not to Name
Small Boy; II played a good trick
IN some boys to-day, Jim. II was
laisy. Some boys was playing at the
ide Of a house, and / was behind a
rec. / thowei q rock through the
yinder, and the man what owned the
house, he come out and he licked all
hem boys, and they didn't know what
hey was gittin' licked about"
Lively Young Lady: IL don't be-
leve word you say, you horrid thing.
Did he tell you that? What? Yes,
es. What did she say That's Just
ike her. He don't care for her a bit.
Where? We're you there? DID YOU
ee them together2 / don't care. It's
ot OF the slightest importance to me.
don't think she's the least bit stylish.
ies, he's very nice. You say this is
he third time he's been out with her
bis week. She's three years older
ban he is. don't believe he said II.
What? He needn't come to see me
he don't want 10. Ill never speak
, him again. the ugly little wretch;
e's more like a monkey han any
hing else
Telephone Gill; eSay, MOllie, have
on heard The hewsY Well, The At
Intas beat Memphis. A mttsder was
Miss Smith has hasl \ fass
nth her dressinaker. Thsre'll be al
r.yer meeting at the Central Meth
dist Church tonight Charlie Blown
as drunk again last night. and ssallie
usher has had big row with her
eau. Amt it jolly?"