Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-11-01
THAT STUpID.YILLA8 EB.
Burdetts Compares Him With Some CITY
Folk.
Written for the eGloBRREpuBLro.

Folk.
Written for the GLOBRREPuBLIc.
II am simply staggered by the opaque
stupidity OF tbs average viIlagsr," says
Mis- Kate fell, h, quotei by a New York
reporter. n am just from Clifton Springs,
and have had an allopathc doe of rural
stupidity. l speak the sad truth" she
continues, 'enightmelr prevails most ex.
clusivelv in the cities In the small vii
lage ignorance stalks od every corner in
unblushing etfrontery. As soon as the
young mon u a tho country village, arrive
at mans estate they seek sociibiIity at tho
bar-room."
Now, there Is n great deal of sad truth iu
all that Tbs very saldest kind of truth
Ah, yes How opaque the stupidity Of ths
village errani boy; how clear the In teli-
gence Of the ''rapil messenger of the city,
who keeps your me sage a week AMI then
gives it to the wrong person. How fault
less the porter; how marvellously accurate
the waite", hpw s,llom or never do we
scarcely hear any complaint on the part of
city pc pple of the stupidity Of city servants
And tn" wisdom of the city man in the
higher walks OF lif' With what intslli.
gent caut Ioi does he look about him In the
railway car, to soc K any may he near to
hear, before he tells his wife wheth,r the
field OF millet they are passing is wheat, or
spring rye Or winter oats, or ! luck wnaat
And when he tells her that the B'rry OK Is
so called b, cause be Is always n rel OK, and
that the off horse is only used to help pull
up hill, how does the stupid vllag, r. hide
his diminished opaque head
: s'Rural stupidity" even in homeopathic
doses, will stare at a balloon until it is out
Of sight, but you must go on Broad way to
see the superior inteligcnc, Of tho city
assemble crowd of 800 business men
around hole in the grouni to watch a
couple of lrishmen dig down to Ieaky gas
main. II is in the city of New York that
the police have to Gear the sidewalks and
compel the crowd of enl liz htenei business
men to move on when a stage horse falls
down. Itis in New York city that intelli.
gent people trample each other to death in
order to see the wind bow mans straw
hat off the Brooklyn bridge. One cannot
remain a great while in the city without
observing the superior ntell ectuality of the
people.
Yes, it Is the sad truth; enlightenment
prevails most exclusively In the cities"
while ''in the small village ignoranc CO stalks
in unblushiny effrontery on every corner"
Ah, yes The enlightenment of the wsr
wards, for nstance The charming refine
ment OF Bedfotd d strest Philadelphia The
superior culture AMI intelle ctualty found
in the slums of New York. How refreshing
indeed after ian allopathic dose OF rural
imbecility at Clifton Springs" is an intel
lectual stroll down the academic shades of
Baxter street.
After the marrow limited compass" of
the farm, what JOY to the Platonic soul, to
hy from tho depressing social inter cour 50
OF the village and seek the sweet con verse
Of the Baconian minds In the haunts of the
slugg,r; how tonic, how broadening the
sapient conversation OF the tough nd the
sani bagger After tho 'corroding preju.
dics" that warps the views OF narrow
mind ID farmers wives, how like tho mama
OF the brain comes to the hungry mind, tho
improving Conversation of ths lady who
yanks rags out OF the gutter with an iron
hook; how welcome the early visit OF the
gentleman who wishes to know if you have
any ant ques in the way of has to disposs
Of; how ike water from the hnty rock ia
the waste of rustic stupidity, ZONES to tue
soul, starving or intellectual iabulum, the
expert in un ppreciated bric-a- brac, the
professor Of JUNK, who with his humble,
but intellectual dog cart, makes psyche
logical col ection9 OF automatic bottle, and
polem.c boots How intensely hitherto it
all Isl
"lf,' SAYS Miss Field, "a man in the
country has any ideas be straightway goes
to the city," Ahl Yes, in tho autumn he
does The country roads are throngei
with him now. He has the idea that
leads him 10 the city. He has an idea
that il is growing too cold to sloep under
the trenS aud straw stacks, and so he seeks
the warmer and less 'Stupiily' ventilated
poles ,tation. The tramps a city creation,
and his exclusive intelligence was iostered
on q free lunch routa
Yes, indeed. Something must he done 10
enlighten tn, appalling stupidity OF the
country villagers, or aifrIyhJed Reason, in
abandouur al this far land outside II the
icncei c,ua' 10 eternal anl "urA' Ignor-
ance, will climb some tail an lonely tree
aud pull tie tres up after her
! ROBERT J. BURpErra