The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1885-07-03
SPOOPENDYKE'S PIE.
He Shows Mrs. s. How His Mother
Used to Make EN-.

he Shows Mrs. s. How His MOthe
Used to Make En-.
my dear" said Mr.. Spoopendyke
folding his napkin and pushing hi
chair back from the table, "my dear
you are pretty good housekeeper
and once in while YOU contrive t.
cook up fair meal, but you have nc
business fooling around a mlnce pie
There never was but one woman who
could make mince pie, and that was
my mother -
Il thought this was nice, !" returned
Mrs. Spoopendye, with just little
culver resting on her lip. II got ii
out OF the cook book"
And you'd better put it right back
in the book as warning to other am
ateurs," continued Mr.. Spoopendyke.
II don't say that thlsis especially bad,
only it doesn't meet with all the re
qulrements of pie as they were in
stilled into my young mind. You
might work it on founding hospitals
that never had any mother, but it
hasn't the soul l used to get out of pie
when 1 lived at home.''
Az" uiu yOuI uOlueT make Ll0
m1nce pie, dearp" asked Mrs. Spoop-
endyke. '1f 1 knew what she used,
perhaps | could get up one of which
you would eat six slices instead of
four. -" And with this purely feminine
dig, Mrs. Spoopendyke looked mod
estly downward and began folding
knife pleatings in the table cloth.
s'Come!" exclaimed Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, jumping impetuously from his
chair. "lf you've got the ingredi-
ents, I'll show you how to make pie
that will draw bowls of envy from the
neighbours" and Mr.. Spoopkendyke
bed the way to the kitchen. ..Where's
Jour. chopping tray and the applesp
Fetch me the hand guillotine and the
beef! Look alive now, my dear, and
we'll startle the world with some rev.
eIatlons on the abstruso subject of
nince pie!''
''Let me put this big towel around
jour neck, SO you won't grease your
clothes, suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke,
dragging out huge crash towel.
whats that for?" demanded her
husband, contemplating it with no |
amount of favor. (Which end of the
pie is that thing supposed to have in
huence withP If make up my mind
when get through that this pie wants
30 be shaved, I'll put on this skirt, but
IN the meantime l want room for all
ny limbs. Now" he continued, as he
dumped the beef and apples into the
tray and went at them vigorously with
1he chopping knife; ''now you watch
abe proceedings and note how this pie
heglns to assume proportions.
didn't your mother peel the apples
before she chopped lhem?" asked Mrs.
Spoopendyke, quietly.
''Eh!" CALCULATED Mr.. Spoopendvke,
slowing up little and looking into
the tray distrustfully. '.Of course
not, >" and he resumed his labors with
more energy. ''lf you did, there's
where you made your mistake. | sup
pose you peeled the beef, too, didn't
YEP Though l don't know" and he
stopped short and regarded his work
1T strikes me this meat
would chop finer if some one had drop
ped pile driver on it once or twice.
Anyway, you don't want your meat
loo fine, and l guess this will do" and
Mr.. Spoopendyke set the tray full of
Jumps on the table and rolled up his
sleeves.
What will you have now, dearp"
inquired his wife. tenderly.
''Some flour and water" replied
MIR. Spoopendyke, cheerily. 'It's the
crust of a pie that is its genius,
and I'm going to turn out slab
OF pastry that will be a monu-
meEt to the artist who is weay-
my this job. Gimme the flour and [
water, while 1 feel as one upon
whom the spirit of successful pie {
rests visiblyr'
Mrs. Spoopendyke brought out the /,
and once more resum- /
ed the relation as a pupil to the ex- s
srcises. ,
Anything else, dear?" she ask
-, as Mr.. Spoopendyke wet down /
his flour and jammed his fists in the l
taste. S
Nothing but profound silence" re-
orted her husband. ''The chief trou- i
lie with the crust to your pie is that S
GU allow your attention to be dis c
racted from it at the critical moment. L
on the contrary, will stop boxing
his oyercoat for that mince meat Just
t the second 1t reaches flakiness," and t
e slammed in more flour and plunged h
gain into his ambitious effort in the v
ray of crust. .'Therer' said he when h
e had fought it to the consistency of e
and and mucilage and rolled 1t out y
lto Two thick chunks. There is the |