The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1885-01-01

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Had ! thought that she loved me ] might
perhaps have dared TO hope she would even
then have been happy as my wife. But she
did not love me Moreover, she was ambi'
| tlouA.
Bho knew-small blame TO her-how beau
tiful she was. Do ! wrong her when i say
that In those days she looked for the gift OF
rank and riches from the man who loved herI
She knew that she was a queen among
women, and expected a queens dues,
Sweetest, are my words crueli They are
the cruelest ] have spoken, or shall speak,
against you. Forgive themD
We were f~riends-great friel de. Such
friendship Ia loves bane, II buoys false
hopes; II lulls 10 security; II leads astrayi 10
Ia a staff which breaks suddenly, and wounds
tho hand which leans upon II, 30 little II
seems 10 need 10 make friendship grow into
love; and yet how seldom that little Ia
added The love which begins with hate or
dislike IL often luckier than that which
begins with friendship. Lovers cannot be
friends.
Phllippa and her mother left my nelgh.
borhood, They went 10 London for awhile.
! heard from them occasionally, and once or
twice, when In town, called upon them.
Time went by. / worked hard nj my pro
fession the while, striving, by sheer toll, To
drive away tho dream from my life, Alasl
! strove In vain. To love Philippa was TO
love her %foreyerl
One morning a letter came from her ]
tore II open. The news IL contained was
! grieyous. Her mother had died suddenly.
Philippe was alone In tho world, 30 far as
! knew, she had not a relative loft; and be-
liovod, perhaps hoped, that, save myself,
sh' had no friend.
! needed no time for consideration. That
afternoon | was In London. II ! could not
comfort her In her great sorrow ] could at
least sympathizo with her; could undertake
the management OF tho many business do
tails which aro attendant upon a death,
Poor PhilippaI She was glad TO SEQ mo.
| Through her tears she flashed mo u look OF
gratitude, | did all | could for her, and
stayed In town until the funeral was over,
Then | was obliged 10 think OF going homo.
What was TO become OF the glrli
Kith or kin she had none, nor did she
mention the name OF any friend who would
be willing 10 receive hor, AS | suspected,
she was absolutely alone In the world, Az
soon as my back was turned she would have
no ono on whom she could count for sym.
patty or holp.
which urged me, In spite OF my better Judg-
mont, In spite Of the grief which still oppross'
ed her, 10 throw myself nj her feet and do.
clare the desire Of my heart. My words
cannot recall, but | thinS-l know ! pleaded
eloquently, Such passion ~ mlno gives
power and intensity 10 tho most Impractical
speaker. Yot long before my appeal was
endol | know that | pleaded In vain. Hor
eyes, her manner told mo sho loved mo not
Then, remembering her present helpless
condition, | checked myself, i begged her
10 forget tho words ] had spoken; not 10
answer them now; 10 lot mo say them again
I'm some months timO. Lot mo still be her
friend, and render her such service 10 l
could.
She shook her head; she hold out her hand.
The first action meant tho refusal OF my
love; tho second, tho acceptance OF my
friendship. schooled myself 10 calmnoss,
md we discussed her plans for the future.
She was lodging In n house In a quiet, 70.
spectacle street near Regents Park. Sho
expressed her intention Of staylng on horo
for awhile,
'But alonol ! exclaimed.
"Why noti What have / 20 foari Still,
] am opon 10 reason II you can suggest
another plan"
! could suggest no other, Phillppa was
past twOnty.ono and would at once succeed
TO whatever money had boon her mothor'a
This was enough 10 live upon, She had no
friends, and must live omowhore, Why
should she not stay on at her present lodg-
ingsl Nevertheless, | tremblcd ~ | thought
Of this beautiful girl all alone In London.
Why could she not love mot Why could
she not DO my wifol II needed all my self
restraint 10 keep mo from breaking afrosh
into passionate appeals
As she would not give me tho right 10 dis
pose Of her future ] could do nothing moro.
/ bado her a sad farewell, then went back
10 my homo 10 conquer my unhappy love.
or 10 suffor from its lrosh inroads.
Conquer III Such love az mino IN mover
conquered. IL Ia n mans lie. Philippa
was mover absent from my thoughts, Lot
my franc Of mind DO gay or grave, Philip
pa was always present
Now and then sho wrote 20 mo, but bor
letters told me little M TO her mode OF life;
they were short friendly opistlcs, and gave
mo little hope,
Yot | was not quito hopeless. | folt that
/ had boon too hasty In asking her for hor
love 40 soon after her mothers death. Lot
her recover from tho shock; then | will try
again. Three months was tho time which
In my own mind l resolved should olapso
before / again approached her with words
OF love. Three monthsl How woarily thoy
dragged themselves awayl
Toward tho end OF my sclf.imposcd torn
Of probation l fanciod that u brighter,
gayor tone manifested itself In Phl,ippa's
letters. Fool that l was, l augurod vol
from this.
Telling myself that such lovo IN mlno
must win In tho end, / went 20 London, and
once moro Jaw Philippe. Sho received mo
kindly. Although her garb was still that OF
doop mourning, novor, ! thought, had ahe
looked moro beautiful. Mt long aftor our
FIRST greeting did l wait before | began 10
plead again, Sho stopped ms nj tho outset.
'Hush,n she said; ~ have forgotten your
former words; let no still DO frlondsn
"Noycrr' | cried paasionntoly. "Phllippa,
answer mo once for oil, toll mo you can lovo
mop
Sho looked nj mo oompasslonntoly. "How
can | best answer your sho said muslngly.
"Tho sharpest remedy IL perhaps tho kind.
est, Bnsll, VIII you understand mo when |
say II Ia too later
"Too latcl What can you meant Has
another"
Tho words died on my lips "a phillppn,