Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1885-06-11


hecper. Esc.s Esc.
Ait or PAINTING.
"My, but these art works do ran into
money" remarked Q passenger whose
breath smelled Like the south side Of
the Ohio River; SET beats ell what fools
some folks make over pictures. When
I was in Chicago / saw little painting
about foot square, that was helda t $500.
'Spect some simpleton VIII come along
and buy it. $500 for . little painting
like that"
'sThat's the way you talk, spoke mp q
bashful drummer, ''but I'll bet you've
paid four times Is much money for
painting not q tenth part Is big"
"What, me 2"
'sYes, you"
"What kind Of a painting ?"
'"The one on the end Of your nose. -
Chicago Herald.
LOSING THE MONEY.
The lesson was on profit and loss. and
the teacher was endeavoring to make
her pupils reason out the problems.
eff q man bought hat for five dol
lars and sold il for three, how many
dollars would he lose 2"
'sTwo," answered bright little fellow
who could subtract three from i've.
The teacher surprised at his quick
ness and apparent knowledge Of arith-
metic, asked him to give the reason
why. Chow did the man lose the
money!"
'sMust have dropped 1t somewhere
said the little innocent, who was better
ct guessing than reasoning.
THE LONG TRAIN.
At the station down In Indiana the
Lake Shore Company employs q lady
ticket agent. She is good agent, and
attends closely to her business, but she
is woman still. The other day lady
traveller stepped up to the ticket window
and inquired about train that was
little late.
evil the train be long ?" she asked,
meaning If it would be long in arriving.
ooh, yes" was the reply OF the fair
agent, ''longer than last season, but
without so many RIFLES around the
edge. - Chicago Herald.
NO MISTAKE.
Old Blkins-"Yes, stree. I never
made no mistake when I gave my son
an education"
Old Pilkins-''D well since he
went through college, eh? r.
"Well, I should say he was. Hes
Just that smart now he can make more
IN month than make In q year."
"You don't say SOP Well. well Edi-
cation is . great thing, that's . fact
What's his business 2"
"He's Q baseball pitcher. "--PhiE0.
eau
KILLING A CAT.
Mr.. Boseen was troubled by cat on
9 neighboring roof, and one night he
jumped ont Of bed and, picking up
pistol, started for the scene OF action,
waking his wife by hiA movements.
'sWhat's the matter ?" she inquired.
"Cats," he answered, briefly.
''What have You got in your hand ?"
sGun," he replied, savagely,
ooh, dear, take care; take care.
Scare, thunder What do I want to
take care for 2"
Scare win kin 0 cat, darling" sIe
whispered. and lodged under the cover.
A KEEnY MOTOR BEAU.
'sNow, Mary" said father to his
daughter who had lover Of the never
go-home-at-a-decent -time-of-night kind,
81 have no objection to your bringing
company to the house, but I don't want
to see that Kelly motor beau Of yours
here again; that's flat. "
'sMy what beau p
"Your Kelly motor beau.
"Why do you call him by such
name p
because he is one Of those chaps that
WoA 80. --oOSt0n COURIER
LEGAL COMPLICATIONS.
'sMy neighbor tied q knot IN my
horses tail, and I want ter hab de law
on him." said 81 Jackson. an Onion
Greek darkey, to Lawyer Gouge.
'sHand over Eve dollars" said the
lawyer.
81 did so cheerfully.
Having got the money, the lawyer
said calmly, putting il in his pocket:
my advice to yOu. my colored friend,
Is now 70 go and unite that knot IN your
horses tail. - Texas Slfrings.
APPROPRIATE NAMES
$50 you have got twins Il your
house 2" said Mrs. Bezumbe to little
Johnny Samuelaon.
ssYes, nam, two Of EN-.
ssWhat are you going to call them p
eeTsl,v,,,s7nu e,,sa Tf,.h&..s.,.. -