davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
Fulton, Mo-, April Ia
LADDONIA LACONICS.

Correspondence Of the Ledger.
LADpoNIA, Mo-, April 7.-"Enoch
Alden" and the "Persecuied Dutch
man" were played here last Friday
and Saturday nights by some of our
local amateur talent. The receipts Of
both evenings were SS0.95. After
expenses are paid the balance goes to
the band boys to help sustain their
organization. The entertainment
gave general satisfaction, and those
engaged in it showed much energy
and perseverance in getting it up, and
each acquitted themselves with credit.
Those who have worked with amatuer
players know nothing Of the little
hardships that have to be met, in the
way OF meeting With all at the same
time, md having a place to meet. &c,
&C. The players were we'll satisfied
With the result and 90 were the audi
ence. Laddonia and vicinity are
liberal and always patronize any
good enterprise.
| The little waif. that came to Lad
donia three weeks ago, disowned en-.
tirely by father and sent off by its
mother, died on Saturday night last
1t seems that God was far more mer
ciful thsn either of its earthly pa
rents and took it out of this world il
all its innocence, before it grew tt
meet the taunts OF our unfriendl,
world.
So far one Of our best families ART
having domestic trouble which vi
presume will result shortly in sep
!, Grafton of husband and wife.
/ The Cummings House has beel
thoroughly cleansed by its presen
landlord. MIR. Seigel, and presents
very different appearance to what j
did. ANNIE LAURIE.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
TOO THIN.
The Fourth District Revenue Collector
ssNot Settled"

We clip the following from a spec
ial from Washington City:
Although the Missouri delegation
selected Cornelius 'Voorhis as the
candidate for the internal revenue
.! 'orship in the Louisiana { MOI
Dastr'tt, that gentlemas is not going
to get the office without contest. 1t
Is claimed thai there WAS something
nos altogether straight in the manner
IN "ii..h the Endorsement was secur-
ed. Que OF The other candidates for
the office, pronhaent Democrat OF
Pike county. has been 4aietlyy yy-c,.lles.ss-
lug material to make the fight on
VOoriis will be here the last of the
week
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

with which to administer the rite !?
And then there are the baptisms Of
Saul at Damascus, by his bedside !;
the baptism Of Lydia, and the bap-
tlsm Of the twelve persons at Ephesus,
without warning or preparation, all
Christian baptisms, and not one Of
them furnishing single circumstance
to help Disciples" theory, hut
many TO ruin it.
John baptized where, or at the
places in which he preached. II he
preached in the wilderness he baptiz.
ed in the wilderness; il he preached
in the Jordon he baptized in the
Jordon; if be preached at Aenon he
baptized at Aenon. So also did the
Apostles. No man in the New Tes.
lament history ever left the place he
preached to hunt water for baptism
Philip and the Eunuch were not hunt
ing water. They came on it sudden
ly and unexpectedly. So that the
pretty little theory of Disciple has nc
foundation in fact and vanishes be-
fore the truth like 1.-THE bsseless fab.
ric of a vision"
And finally. if ''born Of water
means to be put into tue water and
come out again." the to be ''born o1
God" and to be "born Of the spirit
mean Ito be put into God" and lin
to the spirit" and be taken out again
What arrant nonsense will Disciple
make the wold Of God teach in nrle
to support his darling theory! Thi
Interpretation Of John 3:5 is anolhe
one of the frail props furnished th'
dipping-immer>ionists by the super
stitious Catholics who invented I'm
mersion and all its supports.
+. GALLAHER, d. d.
Fulton, Mo-, April IA.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
These are Sslid Facts.

The best blood purifier and system
regulator ever placed within the
reach of suffering humanity, truly is
Electric Bitters. Inactivity Of the
Liver, Billiousness, Jsundice, Con-
stipation, Weak Kidneys, or any dis
ease of the urinary organs. or who
ever requires an appetizer. tonic or
mild stimulant, will always find
Electric Bitters the best and only
certain cure known. They act surely
and quickly, every bottle guaranteed
to give entire satisfaction or money
refunded. Sold ut fifty cents a bottle
by J. F. LlewellTn. lu
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

Dobyns & Gibbs the Druggists
who are always looking after the in
terest of their customers, have now
secured the sale Of DR.. Rosanko's 3
Cough and Lung Syrup, q remedy
that never fails t., cure 'olds, Pains
in the Chest and all Lung Affections
For pro f., try free sample bottle
Regular size so cents and $l.00.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
He AstenIsbed the Rector.

A prominent railroad freight agen,
in this state is an active Episcopa-
liam and vestryman in the church In
the little town where he hses. One
day, when business was crowding, q
man came in who proposed starting
q mill at a small town along the
road which had to pay much more
for freight than towns further along
the route paid--in other words it
suffered The sassassfsEors aysl..s sEorss Efa, s,Il,a.
,natsln-
The visitor pleaded aud ar .uef.
but Of couze in vain. Still Ii held
on, and with his persistcney . pref.
ty vel wore out the limited atieuee
of the agent, beaides keeping other
people waitin,. who had s4lss called
ON business. Finally he eft and the
next man stepped up.
aWell sir," said The irritated agent,
"whereabouts is yolr d-d grist
millfn
II SIR was the meek reply. IAN
the rector to whsm you wrote shout
conducting service next Sunday.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
Origin Of ra.ill.r Proverbs !.

Origin ef Familiar Proverbs.
truth is stranger than fiction"
was invented by an editor as g head
line to a twenty-five lie so monstrous-
ly extravagant that he knew nobody
would believe ten words Of it. The
original use Of this proverb is contin-
ued until this day. Whenever you
see that line in q newspaper don't be-
heve q word you read under it.
'1'n make . spoon or spoil 3
horn" was the thought Of q man
who never made . spoon in all his
life, and who knew perfectly we'll
that he couldn't make one, and only
took Q mean mans malicious delight
in spelling q horn. P. S.-For q
man who likes to take his horn
straight the introduction Of q spoon
always spoils it.
"a wink is as good "a q nod to a
blind horse" was said by man With
q stiff neck, who wanted to nod, but
couldn't. Although why any sane
man should wish either to wink OF
nod ct q blind horse no man can tell.
"A little more sleep and . little
more slumber," commonly attributed
to the Sluggard, was stolen from the
night watchman who invented it in
his dreams.
"Fast bind, fast find" was remark,
ed by police justice when he bound
the tough over to keep the peace, and
fined him 1856.
'sAll's we'll that ends SWELL" wal
said by q murderer who killed 9
dude. The name Of the murderer
is suppressed lest he should be over
run with more orders than he could
fill, and thus he compelled to hire 9
clerk, who would eventually run of
with all the money.
"Ali's fare in love and war;" wal
the inspired thought Of q railroad
conductor.
"One swallow does not make I
summer, Was the brilliant remark O
a man who was trying to see hov
many swallows do make Q summer
Nota Bene-If the thermometer GO
half so high as the experimenter did
the dog days came right along ol
the heels of Christmas that year
The record of the swallows, however
was lost in the dim mists Of O'Bliv
ion, the great Irish swallower:
dead men tell no tales" was tn
Joyous exclamation of the first edito
who slew q man who came in with
|. continued story in si1ty-fve chap
ters. It was this same editor who
: upon receiving 8 demand for 10 cent
, from a poet for an epic poem upo
which he had labored twelve year,
I said: Write makes smite." An
then he smote him, that he died.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

Mexico, NJ. has just gotten q
creamery, new WOODEN mill and a
building and loan association. and
A,w If it conld get the park imprav.
ed. wonId be happy. - Msdisof
tx,x.s.1.nn~.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

A Washington special to the World
says the postoffice department will
hereafter give its advertising business
t. the following papers in the cities
named: New York-World. Herald.
Sun, Post, and staats Zeitung. Phil
adelphis-Times, Democrat and Req
ord. Boston-Post and Teleg(
St. Louis-Post- Dispatch. RepG
and Anzeiger, instead Of q
ocrat- Chicago-All the d
dailiee. a.--=
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

To get liquor license in Orlando,
Fla. q man must present a petition
signed by two-thirds Of the voters OF
the city and pay an annual fee OF
5000 into the treasury. The petiti' n
like .he fee. ,sgood for one year only.
Il Is also provided that the names OF
al persons who s,ga pse..'--- e must
&c printed in the local newspapers
three consecutive times. The | 2ense
is subject to revocation, whenever
the municipal authorities find that
cause for such action exists. Orlando
has 4 900 inhabitants and only two
saloons, both carefully conducted.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
MEXICO, MISSOURI, THURSDAY, APRIL Is, 1885
endyke danced around the room in

endyke danced around the room in
fury.
"Just turn 1t over, my DEAR" said
Mrs. Spoopendyke, land you are ell
right"
"How IN going to turn it over?"
yelled Mr.. Spoopendyke. "S'Pose
I'm going to carry around q steam
boiler to turn me over when I want
tlss other end Of this thing up?
S'pose I'm going to hire man to 60
around with a griddle spoon and
turn me over like hspjsck, just to
please this dod-gasted bsshing suit? ?
Dye think work on pivots?"
"'Just take it of and put it on the
other way" urged Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, who began to see her way
clear.
Mr.. Spoopendyke kicked the struc-
ture up to the ceiling and plunged
into it once more. This til it came
out all right, and ss he ktoned j,
up and surveyed himself the glass
the clouds passed av and he
smiied.
~ Hl. it," b. rs .tted. 'shs
color suits me, and ! think you have
done very well. my dear; only" and
he frowned slightly, Il wish you
would mark the arsnS and legs SO
can distinguish one from the other,
or some day ! will present the start.
ling spectacle of = respectable elderly
lgentleman hopping around the beach
upside down. That's SILL
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16


providing the supper at the inaugu~
raj ball say that the bill Of fare OF
that occasion comprised the follow.
ing.
Six large salmon.
Six thousand rolls.
One hundred hams.
Six large striped bass.
Eight thousand claims.
Fifty pate de foie gras.
Sixteen sets of roast beef.
Fifty dozen heads of lettuce.
To hundred roast Turkeys.
Five hundred boiled turkeys.
Two barrels of chicken salad.
Fifty dozen punches Of celery.
One hundred and fifty tongues.
One thousand pounds Of cake.
One thousand pounds Of lobster.
Eight thousand picked oysters.
Five hundred quarts of water ices
One thousand quarts of Ice cream
One hundred quarts Of consomm,
soup.
One hundred and fifty boned tur
keys.
One hundred and fifty loaves o
bread.
| In addition to this, there were nu
merous ornamental dishes, and fruits
cheese, nuts, raisins and coffee wer
served in large quantities. Every
thing was brought direct from Nun
ray Hill, New York, already cooked
but an efficient corps of cooks an
lcarvers was also brought on to IN
sure the supper bstng served il
lproper manner.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

Why dni't sou hay VIM. Wettef'a
celebrated Dicks beer. 49-u
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
What They Ate,

The stewards who had charge Of
providing the supper at the inaugu~
raj ball say that the bill Of fare Oh
that occasion comprised the follow.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16
What Does the White House Cost.
Wash,ngtoo Chr Oiaveisnd Lander.

Most people believe that the $780,
900 year which the president gets
as bis salary is the sum total. This
is . mistake. The estimate Of the
amount which congress is to appro-
pirate this year lies before me, open
at the page relating to the president.
/ see that S36,O6 is asked for him IN
addition to his salary Of $50, 900 to
pay the salaries of bis subordinates
and clerks. His private secretary
is paid $3.50, his assistant private
secretary $2,250, bis stenographer
81 800, five messengers each 1900,
q steward $1,000, two doorkeepers
who each get $1,000, four other
clerks at good salaries, one telegraph
operator, two ushers getting $1,000
and s1,40O, q night usher getting
200, a watchmanS who gets $500,
and a man to take care Of the fires
who receives 1864 2 year. In adii-
ton to this there is set down q, 900 for
incidental expenses, such as station
cry, carpets and the care Of the pres
idential stables. And further on,
under another heading, there ID de-
mand for nearly $4,000 more. OF
this $12,5oO is for repairs and refur-
nishing the White House, $4,000 is
for fuel, $4,000 is for the green
house, and $4,000 is for gas, match
es and the stables. The White House
all told costs the country in connec-
ton with the president considerably
over $l25, 900 year. But this is g
mere bagatelle in comparison with
the costs of the heads Of the othel
governments of the world. In thii
connection it will be interesting tt
give your Democratic readers som'
idea Of the big governmental ma
i
chine they have now to manage
From this digest Of appropriations
see that the executive Office is to ge
. SIPS. 900, the state department il
! round numbers sl,400, 900, the treas
!! ury $4s, 900, 900, the war departmen
D $4s. ZOO, 900, the navy 100000
t the interior department SIS, ,O0O.O0
J.. the postoffice department $4,000
y the agricultural department $500, ,00(
and the attorney generals Office g.
!; 600, 900, making In all q grand tot'
of over $3.50, ,000,00 The none
!! paid out alone, however, gives a
y adequate idea Of the immense bus
+, ness done by the government. Som
o departments, such as the postoffie
n and the patent Office, are almost
not quite self supporting.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16

Then it is none Of your business.
What did you disturb me for?
When the place was again still the
German glided out. and whea far
enough from the building not to ap-
pear to be coming from it turned
toward the sentinel, and, walking hy
him whistling .'Dixie," stopped to
turn off a street gas light, as though
that we're his avocation. and sauntered
.sround the corner"
Mexico weekly ledger., 1885-04-16


I - Commandments for Girls. ar
A friend sends @ Gs the fsiiiie ffesiiiiewiRe se 81: 4
teen commandments for girls:
l. Mind your own business.
z. Never meddle with other peo-
piss affairs.
/ 3. Don't be envious.
: Don't be hypocrite-if yoa
can help it.
5. Don't lie-unless you csn gal.
by it. i
6. Never speak evil Of another.
Z. Never forsake Q friend il,
trouble.
g. Don't be jealous-hearted.
9. Keep your own path straight
and let others do the same.
10. Don't try to convert sinnsl
by what is said behind
! !, !, !, ! !, !, ! ; :
II. Speak to he I
keep your moa
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1885-11-26

FOR THE LAST TIME MISS AND TALK THINGS OVER.
Just her, miss laid her paper down and looked
straight at ME. I1T-
"Now, doctor" ...
"Now, miss" said l.
what do you say?" ......l
miss" answered. curious things happen. The
very question was going to ask you!'
DO you like Vanity nowP
This will confess. miss,"I said. Her conduct
| the last rev pa{es has'been very pretty"
will she marry Tom Pembroke nowf'
why, miss, said l. 'she has good as prom.
ised"
But remember. doctor he was poor man before
she would even give him hope.'
mo doubt" said I, "her behavior /, uncommonlv
like the correct thing"
VI liked her from the first" miss remarked. "De
pend upon 1t, doctor 1t takes woman to und or.
stand a woman" "t' '..'I - =.
THE men make poor hand Of 1t mostly, miss"
Then she began to laugh.
(which OF us wrote this novel doctor?" " #E
"i ou see, miss, said l. "things have got so mixed
up that no one living can tell But suppose we saw
that first 1t was you and me- and then me and YOU
and then you by yourself."
And say what they may" miss remarked, "all
that Is not mine Is yours. doctor. And we can ex
plain how we came to know 1t all-every sentence
Then she stopped again. GsS Saa al ~ ST.
Tomorrow, doctor, we shall road the finish ,,
It seemed likely enough. But that night miss wa,
suddenly called away to nurse sister who was
taken dangerously ILL She did not return home for
six long months Then she returned only to be mar.
ried: and all was done In such hurry that l never
saw her until the wedding bells were ringing She
had called on the day but one before, and, ike
my luck was out. Dear heart! how pretty and
happy she looked coming out of the church. ali
bushes. satin. blossoms, lace and happiness! And
what handsome young fellow he was! And how,
quickly miss got In to her carriage! And what rat
tlng Of wheels and rustling Of gowns and scatter
Ing OF flowers and whirling OF sights past my old
eyes, and OF old fancfes through my old brains
Do you know. when the churchyarl was empty,
and all was over, I sat down on q tombstone, and
looking down the road just where the last carriage
turned the corner, / fell thinking,
> And when was done my musing:
Dear heart" said I, remembering the story all al
once. THE end OF Vanity Hardware WIN never be
toldp
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1885-11-26
Stated by h. B. Cochran, druggist,

Lancaster, Pay Have guaranteed over
300 bottles Of Burdock Blood Bitters for
dyspepsia, sour stomach, bilious at
tacks, liver and kidney troubles"
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1885-11-26
CHAPTER XIII.

FOR THE LAST TINE MISS AND 1 TALK THINGS OVER
Just her, miss laid her paper down and looked
/ straight at ME. '"s 1T-
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-12-09
Turbulent Reds.

A dispatch of the 1st from Tucson, Ari
says: THE Chiracahuas killed the driver
name unknown, of the Graham bullion
team, last evening, sixteen miles from San
Carlos agency. People are much alarmed
in anticipation of further depredations.
The total number killed are: The driver,
two American herders named Harrison and
Waldo, and nine White Mountain squaws
and children. The reservation has been
raided for sixty miles. Renegades have
crossed the ella going south, at the sub
agency. Gen. Sheridan and aides arrived
at Fort Bowie yesterday, where he is con-
ferring with Gen. Crook"
Official news from Fort Bowie, on the I'd
says party of Indians under the lead of
Josanie, brother of Chihuahua, were seen
in the vicinity OF Fort Apache on the 23d
ult. The next day one of their number was
killed in an attack upon camp of White
Mountain Indians, about eight miles south
west of Apache. The following day they at
tackled another camp of White Mountain
Indians about twenty miles south of
Apache. In these two attacks they killed
eleven women, four children and five men
and boys.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-12-09
A Poor Royal Fiddler.
from the London World. |

From Cno LONDON w OrlQ.J
The usual Saturday afternoon enter
tainments at Brighton were supple
mented last week by concert at the
Dome, the principal attraction of
which was performance on the fiddle
by the Duke of Edinburgh. Roman
emperors used to appear as gladiators,
and no doubt" drew" enormously to
the circus, though possibly they could
not gladiate any better than the Brit
ish prince can fiddle, which he does, |
am told, very badly. But Brighton,
though colby treated by the govern
ing classes, is very royal and attended
in it's hundreds, ungratefully leaving
it's old favorite. Mr.. Brandram, to
spout away in an adjoining apartment
TO an audience which might have been
fit, but was certainly few. I have new
er heard the duke play, which does not
much matter, as | am no Judge; but |
am told by connoisseurs that for III,
r. FL. to stand up before a paying au-
dience and pretend to be a competent
performer on the violin speaks well for
his courage. One excellent local jour
nal, the Sussex Daily News, which is
Enthusiastically loyal, ventures on the
following remarks:
1.-THE royal violinist, who had led
the orchestra in the second part, re-
manned seated while playing the Lar
CO. His royal highness commenced
with apparent nervousness, and tx e
graceful smoothness of the melodious
air was marred by detective intona-
ton, which did not harmonic with
the delicate handling of the harp by
Mr.. Lockwood, or the discriminate
use of the organ by Mr.. Cooke. The
finale WAS taken up by the remaining
violins and was very effective"
A poor devil playing for his bread
would probably have been we'll Kissed
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-12-09

September 80, 1884, it was 1875
100, showing an increase for this year
of upwards OF 100000. The crop is
estimated as much larger this year
than last. Very little of it, however,
rates as No. /, by reason of the very
dark color of the barley. The animals
exported to the United States for
breeding purposes form an important
item in the trade from Toronto dis
trict, amounting in value to $227,-
$40 for the past year. A large pro-
portion of these animals were stations
and mares, mostly of the Clydesdale
breed. Some sheep were exported,
mostly of the Cotswold breed. A large
number of horses, mostly for street
car purposes, are shipped yearly from
Toronto. A large quantity Of wool is
exported annually from this consular
district to the states, most of it going
to Philadelphia, with an occasional
shipmen to Lowell.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-12-09

WHEN people engage in a temper
ance" controversy how very intemper-
ate they can become. AS an illustra
ton during the recent red hot prohibi-
ton campaign in Atlanta, Ca, the
Rev. Dr. Hawthorne and member Of
his church, Julius Brown, son of Sena-
tor Brown, got tog going for each other.
The reverend gentleman abused Brown
for not coming out for prohibition
boldly, whereupon Brown said thepar-
son was a zealot who was dragging the
sacerdotal garments through the mire
of politics. Then the parson went
for his church member in the papers
after this style over his own signature:
"Perhaps ought to apologize to the
public for making any allusion to the
little fellow Brown. A prominent citi-
zen of Atlanta says it is sign o. cour-
age in any man to attack Julius Brown
because he has not a friend In the
world. My only reason for bestowing
thought upon him was to let thepeo-
pie know that he was on the doggery
side of the question before them. Ii
he had come to us the issue would be
very doubtful. 1t has been our policy
to keep him on the other side until the
election is over. No one who knows
me and no one who knows Julius will
pay the least attention to his foolish
charges against me. He does not ex-
pect anybody to believe them. The
only thing that the little creature
says that at all disturbs my feelings is
that he and I belong to the same
church. Now, will not somebody come
to my relief? Is the little fellow not
talking in his sleep? Can it be true
that he belongs to any church? Is it
possible that any church has such a
burden to carry? Alas! Alas! Alas"
In response, Mr.. Brown wrote as fol-
lows: ''It is my painful duty to lay
before the public this extraordinary
production. The argument is too
glimmering and the logic too nebulols
to admit of reply. am sure the pub
lie will excuse me for declining to ex
change epithets with blasphemer, or
handy words with a blackguard." The
whole business illustrates how intern
perate temperance reformers can be-
come as excited as if Ghey were in
their cups, and while processing to be
Christians they can use language
which is ordinarily attributed to the
saloon loungers.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-12-09

THE report of the commissioners
appointed by the Dominion Govern
ment to investigate the loss of the
steamship Algoma in Lake Superior
is very satisfactory so far as its ex-
PLANTATION of the manner in which the
passengers and all the women and
children came to be lost, but it is sim
gularly silent on the subject of the
captain and the first and second
mates. They got ashore in pretty
good condition, considering.