Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-03-14
BRIGHT BITS.


INHABITANTS of the Himalaya Districts eat
six meals a day. There are no editors there
Boston Post.
WITH Daniel Manning, Daniel Lamont and
Daniel Lockwood his closest friends, Mr..
Cleveland is a sort of lion in Daniels den.-
Hartford Post,
4 NEW YORK EDITOR complains that ''the
silver dollar is too big and the gold dollar is
too little" Our objection to both is that they
are too slippery ,-Phil2Gelphia CdM
THE tears wept by Republicans over Allen
q Thurman whom they mercilessly abused
when he was in the Senate-would put to the
blush the biggest crocodile in the Nile.-Utica
OdssrCer.
IT is announced on unofficial authority that
Mr. Frelinghuy sens alleged foreign policy
has been sold to q New Jersey huckster, who
will use ii as a cranberry Observation-Disclosures
Dhid Press lRep.)
MILITARY RED TAPE required the appoint
ment OF major, captain and first lieuten-
as board 10 condemn SICK mule TO be shot
to death at Omaha. The mule died during
the session of the gallant board.-ChioGg0
Tin-ss.
\ DOOR BELLE-the pretty maid servant at
your sWeetheart's house. But che isn't "a
thing to adore" with safety when your sweet
heart IS looking down at you from the head
OF the stairs over the Notwithstanding
Journal.
CLERGYMEN and coachmen are enemies Of
the skating rnk-the clergyman because it
interferes with his revival meetings; the
cOachman because milllOnaires' daughters
have ignored him ard now elOpe with the
fancy roller skGter.-NOrristosCn Herald.
JEFFERSON HAYES, coloreG gentleman
and agricultural dentist, of Hawkinsvllle,
Ga, is the champion stump puiler. having
removed S27 stumps from 13 acres. The close
connection between stumps and acres sug-
gests the possibility OF good pun for some
suffering zrapher.-BOstOn Adgertissr.
"MR. GLADSTONE, understand your policy
is not satisfactory" "Well, fir, what is that
to you?" ~ called to see il couldn't write
policy for me? Who are you, sir?' "Me?
I'm agent for the Nevergetleft Insurance
Company, sir; capital six" Thud.-Chicdg0
Meas.
AIANAGER-"so you wish to starr"
Beautiful Lady-''Yes, SIR"
My our wardr0beV
b. LIS on . scale of magniacence never
before equaied."
M-"Good. Can you act?"
i. L.-"NO."
M-"Hum! guess you'll do, then. "-BoS-
ton Courier.
s'WHAT have you got there?" said old Pun
gleun to his daughter; soma pressed how-
ers?"
aye. SIS. sir.r she replied. turning red.
Don't seem to have made good job OF 1t;
what were they pressed agalnstE"
"Why-er-against my belt" murmured
the girl, VINO had Deen 10 picnic Win ChdF-
lev. But the old man never tumbled,-SdR
ErdHciSc9 Post.
''YEs. 1 know I've been tough character
in my day." remarked AN old saloon rOunder
wiping his bleared and rheumy eyes, "but
honestly, gentlemen, am trying as hard as a
man can TO live it down."
"True it's never too late to mend" OBJ
served sympathetic bystander, "but how arc
YOU trying to live 1t DOWN."
''Why, I'm living downtown down cellar,
down at the heel. down on my luck, and down
in the mOuth.-ChicagO Telegram.
PLAYED-OUT PLACE-HUNrERS.-
Now furions are the men who seek
A government position;
And those who once were mild and meek
Now curse 1T the condition
OF things in Washington.
They've grown so weary, worn and weak
While waiting for mission,
They scarcely audibly can speak
To offer their petition
Unto the rising sun.
Vo,sL. IL