The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1885-01-15

Tho Foundations 81 Michael.
Union County, Indiana. numbers
amongits taxpayers good-natured old
granger who is one Of the largest men
In size ever seen outside Of canvas, for
nothing. He is also as big in heart AZ
heis in body, and would rather hear
good story than 60 TO church. An
other good thing about him il that he
can take . joke as well as give one. and
enjoys one on himself or his wife's re-
lations with as much zeal as he would
on Uncle Dick Haworth himself, or
even Tom Burnside. his nearest neigh
Dor; and, by the way, his name is Witt,
and he has right, by the law of
heredity. to be witty fellow, and he
Is. in all that the name implies. Among
the good ones at his own expense which
he hands around to the boys when he
goes 10 public sale, is one that cured
Henry Hustled of dyspepsia and made
Charley Stivers, the postmaster, smile
for the first time since election.
Being large man, Michael is OF
course somewhat gifted in the matter
of feet far above the common run of
mortals. He wears shoe that could
In emergencies be utilized for either a
trunk or q cradle, if the wardrobe was
not an actors, or the baby overly large.
1t is a shoe that would gladden. the
heart of city editor, and take the
melody out of spring poet for life. 1t
could give the Bogardus Kicker
the choice of innings and break
its back at the first lunge. 1t is
shoe that would bankrupt boot
black and make him gibbering idiot
to the end of his days. In fact, it is
pretty good-sized shoe, not great deal
smaller than the foot of st. Louis
belle, when pinched up in pumps for q
bali. In his younger days this massive
man wore boots, but he is getting along
in years now, and don't feel like walk
ing to the forks of the road every time
he wants to pull them off.
A good many years ago, so Michael
told the scrivener, he had the misfor-
tune TO get his feet poisoned, and they
began to swell so rapidly that the cook
stove had to be got out of doors to make
room for them in the house, but Link,
the longest of the four long boys in
his giant team, was sent to town with
utmost speed, for keg of liniment,
and by taking turns and working hard
throughout the night, the long boys
rubbed the swelling down somewhat
and saved the house.
Some days afterward, when the swell
ing had come down sufficient for q
horse to bear the burden, without suf-
fering incurable curvature of spine,
Michael mounted his Norman gelding
and went out barefooted to view the
country and surprise the natives. He
RODE on for time without having his
thighs pulled out of joint, and finally
halted in the creek to water his horse
and soak his infamed bunions. While
sitting there wondering if it wouldn't
pay him to go into competition with
steam thrashers and tread out the grain,
stranger rode up and gazed at Michael
and his feet in speeches. wonder.
Fine day." said Michael, sizing the
stranger up, with the habit of man
who sometimes lends money.
@Y-a-a-s," replied the stranger, still
keeping his eyes glued on Michaels
feet, in figurative sense, of course.
Live in these parts" from Michael
came.
"No; and I'll be hanged if 1 want to, :"
came from the man of unknown name.
"Not if you walk much hereabout in
your sleep.
II have done such things" said
Michael, as he spit into the creek, and
raised the water; not very much, to be
sure, but little.
well, no wonder crops are ruined, {"
the strange man did reply. "But /
wouldn't thought it, hardly. How in
the name of shoe-leather you manage
to carry them feet around without pull
ing your knees out % tint is one of the
things L don't suppose I'll ever know
before get bald-headed." And the man
took another look at the foundations of
Michael, and then he unused and bit his
nails, and unused again, and chewed his
cud and ruminated for quite spell,
and then, says he, quite brusque like !:
well, well, how body kin be mis-
taken sometimes, can't they?"
IL don't know" says Michael. How
SOP"
"Why, stranger" said the curious
man, with considerable emotion, when
/ saw you coming on the top of the hill
yonder, looked at you kind o casual
like, but could q swore you was rid
ing a mare with twin colts;" and then
he took another look at the feet, wiped
the gathering tears from his eyes on
his coat-slseve, spurred his horse into
q keen gallop, and was seen no more.
Reader, our task is done, and you
can fix up the moral to suit yourself.
Still, if you are too thin-skinned to
take this story without collateral testi-
mony, you can send on quarter, to
cover cost of boxing, and be accommo-
dated with a photograph of the shoes
that Michael wears, by the first fast
freight. Chicago Ledger.
"BOw-WOw."