The Indianapolis sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis, Ind.) 1880-1904, 1885-01-18
JUST FROM Dakota.
How Neat Little woman Got the Best o.
the Big Conductor.

las we pulled out Of La Crosse the other
night where took the train," said the big
conductor, Il went through looking at tick
cts, and when / got 20 the sleeper the coon
gave me ticket for woman in au upper
birth, from some place in Dakota 10 Chicago,
and said she wanted ne to pay for her berth.
| thought il Was singular bat went along
and pulled open the curtain and said tick
eis' The young woman rolled over toward
me and said halo, bu5' and handed me
roll about as dig az wsd of chewing to-
bacco done mp IN tissue paper. ] told her
it wss - so dollars, and she said that was ell
right. was little Bit taken back, think
ing may be she had given me all of her
money to keep for her I'LL morning. | I'M
rolled the paper, and what do Yon think it
waE?'
Hair switch. !" said the sad conductor.
"CotIoD batting" said the conductor with
the bad eye.
Nav, said the big conductor. "You are
ell wrong 1t was q package Of gopher tails,
forty IN all. Tails CT these little gophers
the boys used 10 drown ont by pouring
water IN the holes 1 looked at them and
rolled them mp and opened the curtain, and
told her she had given me the wrong roll.
] told her this company was hard up, and
all that and found it difficult TO pay divi-
dend, but it was going TO try snd pull
through till the first of January without
taxing any gopher tails, and said something
ABOUT Two CIt was lyluS Ou
! pillow with her face within four inches OF
| mine, and she whispered, 'Lookebere, have
been out in Dakota visiting, and out there
counties pay a premium on g0pherS, the
same as they do mere on wolves, and ihey
take the tails as evidence, and in the scarcity
of small change the gopher tails are used
for currency. In trading at the
quantity of these tails, and / got rid of them
| all except forty, which st q nickel apiece, is
! just two dollars, and made up my mind ( o
| pass them off on conductor. Now put the q
right in your pocket and turn them over 10
| the general Office as q sample of the currency
out in Dakota, and close the curtains l
| tried to reason with her. / told her gopher
tails were no money, and that il took them
| to The Office they would give me the laugh.
and i must have money. She said il did
| not go right away from her berth che would
scream and wake up everybody on the train,
! and the passengers would lynch me, and she
| got ready TO scream. Well, l was paralyZed.
| bad been talking with her too long, any.
| wav, and you all know how it would be IL a
| woman should scream st three o'clock ia the
morning, in a sleeper, and forty passengers
| should put their heads out of the curtains
and find a conductor with his head in wo
| mans berth. They would all think he WAS
| q bold, bad man. So / took my gopher tails
| in one hand and my lantern in the other
| and went out into the baggage car. thought
| it over and concluded to wait till morning,
and speak to her after she got up. We got
breakfast at Portage, and she was just the
neatest little woman ever was. AfIer we
started from Portage went in and sat down
opposite her an began to talk about the
| weather, asked If she rested WELL and she
said, Beg pardon, but believe there isnoth-
ing furth er to be said / paid you my fare,
| and she turned and locke out the window.
Well, didn't want TO pull that handful OF
| be- toslc ONT ~ and hn bar
| up, and call the attention of all the passen-
gers because felt as though she would get
on her dignity and say I was lunatic, and
the passengers would all believe it. So got
up and walked out, and when | left the train
here, as it pulled out for Chicago, she waved
her handkerchief at me and smiled. think
she is the slickest confidence operator ever
| SAW