davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
IN A SLEEPING CAR.

How the cowboy Conducts Himself i'm One
of These Adjunc,s of Civilization.
where do l camp" he inquired,
me. That's my pigeon-hole, is it?
All right, old son, just watch my mo-
ton while 1 file myself away"
At this juncture he was desired to
turn over his revolver to the porter,
which he declined to do in a very spir-
tied manner.
"'Old Dad CHS revolver) and me al.
ways sleep together, and we don't want
no DIVORCE" he explained,
The conductor demonstrated, but was
advised not to try to brad this mules
tall"
This here's sleepin' car, amt it?'
he at length inquired.
Yes"
..Well, why don't you let people
sleep then. when they've paid and gone
into your game? If you're aiming to
keep people awake and want company,
lust dance into the next car; there's
lots of folks there don't want to sleep,
nohow, and they'll be glad to see
you"
The conductor withdrew, and my
friend pulled off his boots and stretched
himself, with many comments in an
undertone on the poverty of the sur
roundings.
In about ten minutes this errat:c per-
son had his head out in the aisle.
Say. you boy!' to the porter.
'Well, sah.
.sCome a runnin'."
handed pillow about as big as pin
cushion.
Take that gooseha'r thing away"
commanded the cowboy.
Don't you want a pillow, sah?"
asked the porter.
THAT amt no pillow, and l don't
want it nohow; I'm afraid it'll get in
my ear"
After this, silence, and for a short
time I slept. I reused up, however,
at an exclamation on the part of my
neighbor.
Hold on there. my son, jist drap
them boots"
Il was only jest gwine to black 'em
boss"
..Drap EN-
They drapped.
.'Jest gwine to pull them spurs. I
reckon. Now, don't monkey around
my camp, taking things no more. If
you want anything. speak for it. If
you can't speak make signs. and if you
can't make signs shake a bush. You
b ar me?"
"Yes, sab"
After this, silence. The wheels and
rails again sang together, and the car
again kept approving time, and pres.
emily | slept without Interruption
Rocku Mountain NcUs
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
WOMEN'S HEALTH,

Outdoor Life and Activities Important
Factors In Its Conservation.
The redemption of women's health,
am more and more convinced. depends
on their taking to outdoor life and &C.
tlvities. Reading high class memoirs
which are in every ones hands nova,
days, of the Carlyles. the Sterlngs and
f. ID. Maurice, one is disguised to hear
the continual story of weak health, and
women who, brought face to face wit b
the realities of life, Immediately droop,
languish and are a long time dying
If they have house to keep and a
share of the actual work. like Mrs.
Carlyle, at Craigenputtock and Chel-
sea, they sicken mysteriouSlv, and their
life is time of wrestling with house
hold affairs, alternating with refuge on
the sofa, or months in the doctors
hands. in that wretched. unimprovable
state which justified the sigh OF much
tired husband who '.wished his wife
would get better, or something" Have
l not, through the ignorance of our day
and generation, wasted life enough in
attacks of the familiar household
demon, nervous prostration, which
only vanishes on turning the patient
out of doors. Twice and again, friends
have looked pityingly on me as good
as gone, but taken out of doors ten
hours a day, as good for nothing else,
sun and wind wrought their spell of
healing, and health came again.
Henceforth no more indoor life than
must be for me. and would urge other
women to fashion their lives so as to
spend them more in the open air.
Tick's Magazine.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
UnfavorabIy Located.

Old Uncle Nose met Sam Johnsing
on Austin avenue few days since, and
said to him:
Il hear, Sam, you are going to lead
ter de altar one OBJ Austin's farest
daughters. Am dat de fac?''
"Uncle Nose. hit am de fac dat has
been PAWN my distresses ter de lubly
and accomplished Miss Matildy Snow
ball, but de tender relations which has
dissisted between us am severed for
ebber. sah."
Ibid she kick yer, Sammy, or did
she only set the dog on yer?''
mo, sab. She lubs me yit, and she
wanted me to call on her twict day,
sab. but she Ibis next door to de cullud
lady who has a wash bill agin me. so /
jess made up my mind to transfer my
defections ter some udder lady what
am more favorably located, sab. y
Ie1as SytingS.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
PITH AND POINT.

The divorce courts ought to be
abolished. They encourage too many
men to be false to the Union.
"A fifty-dollar ring may not typify
the depth of the love that presents it,
but it may tell a tale of terrible strain
upon the pocket that pays for it.-FaU
Ricer 4dcance
If one have business across the
water. it is all right, or if he goes for
improvement to mind or body; but this
gong abroad merely for the sake OF
Dragging about it is broad farce
Boston Post.
w oman is herself creature of in
tuition, as everybody will admit; but
that's no reason why she should sally
out on the street with thick drab veil
drawn over her face away down to
her chin. and then expect every male
being of her acquaintance she meets to
recognize her half a block away
Somercilie Journal.
"A well-dressed and pretty young
woman, who went about in New York
saying that she wanted to get married.
was promptly clapped into an insane
asylum. When a woman wants hus-
band and does not continually declare
she would not touch horrid man with
a ten-foOt pols, it is a sure sign of in
sanity.-Phitadelphia Call.
Il know" said the agent, ''that
the house isn't in very good condition,
and that the location isn't the best, but
you'll have splendid neighbors here"
Indeed" ''Yes'm. Best neighbors
in the world; kind and generous. For
the first six months you'll be able to
borrow anything from them. from a
fat-ron to tea and sugar. Why, tho
last tenant here borrowed the cooking
stove of the people next door, and used
it so long that the folks went and
bought another for their own use. Oh.
it's the best neighborhood you could
get into. "-Bostora Courier.
Mistress (to applicant for service)
How many nights out a week."
APPROXIMATIONS, mum. Oh niver
sthir out" Mistress-''Will you have
many friends to see you?" Applicant
Not wan, mum Oh have no friends?"
NJ stress-.What wages will you ex-
pect?" Applicant-''Oi'll lave that to
We, num-" What kind of
housework are you willing for?" APP
plicant-''O'm willin' to wash an airun
an cook an scrub an clane windys an
wait on table an take care av childer
an carry IN coal an bu Id fairies -
Here a loud ringing was heard at the
door and the keeper OF an asylum
rushed in and secured the lunatic.)-
London Punch.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
ENGLAND'S ARMED FORCES.

Some Figures Likely to Prove Interesting
At the Present Juncture.
Fortresses are of little use-indeed,
of no use, unless there are troops of
sufficient numerical strength to hold
them. Unfortunately, the British
Army, although much improved of late
wears, and although it now possesses
reserve which formerly was non-exist-
emit, is not numerically strong enough
for the duties required of it, especially
when, as at the present time, over TO-
600 men are locked up in the Valley of
the Nile and q, 900 in Ireland. The
army in England and Scotland at the
present time consists of about SO. 900
regular troops not under orders for tor
eign serv ce; of $4,000 regular troops
in Ireland, who can hardly be removed
from that island; of $4,000 in foreign
stations exclusive of Egypt, the
Soudan and India); of $4,000
in Egypt and the Soudan,
or under order (of these $4,000 are al
ready there and 1000 on the way; Co.
600 in India. and two West Indian
regiments of negroes, numbering about
LOO of all ranks. There are also
about $4,000 in the first-class reserve,
1000 in other reserves, and a militia
reserve of 10000. In case of compli-
cation. no troops could be called out
except those in England and Scot
land and the reserve-a total of 1885,
500. From this total, however, must
be deducted all sick men and recruits
about 5,OO0-leaving only 101, 800
available for the greatest emergency.
With regard to the militia, its estab-
lishment is $4,000, but the actual
strength is about 100000. OF these,
5000 belong to the militia reserve, al
ready counted in the regular army; alb
sentees and deserters number 1000;
recruits. $4,000; so that only $4,000
is the total force of militia that can be
depended upon in case of war. Thus
only 153, 500 men can be brought to-
gether. OF these, garrisons abroad
will require 40, 900 to fill them up; the
arsenals and military ports. $4,000
regulars, even supposing that volun-
teers form the chief part of their de-
tense, in addition to $4,000 pensioners
and $4,000 militia; the commercial
ports would require, in addition to the
volunteers, 1000 regulars and 5000
militia. These. taken together. num-
Der 12S.O00. Taking that number from
153, 500. there remains only 25.5OO for
the movable army, force totally in
ad>G2A,te to take the field with any
prd2kuct of success against an invading
for6o-which would not certainly
be less than 100000 men-or with
wh<o conduct any Offensive expedi-
ton into an enemy's country.-Fort-
nightly RecteaO.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
More Than Thanks.

Fort Madison, Iowa. Mrs. Lydia E.
Pinkham: 81 am glad to inform you that
I have tried one bottle of your Vegetable
Compound and have found great relief.
more than thank you for your kind advice.
have never felt 80 well as / do now since
had these troubles" Yours Resp'y, Mrs.
w. C. A.. The above is sample of
the many letters received by Mrs. Pink
ham expressing gratitude for the benefit
Another letter, from Kaufman, Texas,
says: "Your Compound has done me
more good than all the doctors ever did,
for which thank you with all my heart. d
Your friend, Anna B
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11

Young Men, Read This.
THE VoLTAIC BELT Co., of Marshall, Mich,
offer to send their celebrated ELECTRo-VoLr
rAIC BELT and other ELECTRIC APPLIANCES
on trial for 80 days, to men tyoung or old)
afflicted with nervous debility, loss of vital
ity and all kindred troubles. Also forrheu.
matism, neuralgia, paraly sis,a and many 9th
or diseases. Complete restoration to health,
vigor, and manhood guaranteed. No risk in
Cured, as 80 days trial is allowed. Write
them atonce for illustrated pamphlet, free.
THE way to make an overcoat last is to
make the undercoat first.-Lynn Union.
A Book Free: on the Liver its Diseases and
Cure. DR.. Sanford, 231 Broadway, New York.
THE blacksmith strikes when the iron is
hot.
If afflicted with Sore Eyes, use DR.. Isaac
Thompson's Eye Water. Druggists sell it. 25c.
PIXIES TOOTHACHE DROPS cure In minute, 25c.
Glenn's Sulphur Soap heals and beauties. 25c.
GERMAN CORN REMOVER kills COrns s. Bunions.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11

Feather beds having gone out of
fashion, the economical fair ones utilize
the contents of their old mattresses by
piling them upon their head gear. The
plumaoe of two well-filled ticks is quite
sufficient for the average bonnet.-M
4. y. Mail.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11

AS A CURE FOR SORE THROAT AND
COUGHS, " Bro,cn's Bronchial IToches"
have been thoroughly tested, and maintain
their good reputation. Sold only in t0IeS.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11

THAT was q very conscientious humor.
his girl had chestnut hair.-The Hatchee.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11

PRor. CHAs. p. WILLIAMS, Phi. D., Of
Philadelphia, states that there is neither
morphia, opium nor minerals In Red Star
Cough Cure.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
Young Men, Read This.

WANTED: Cement to mend the boy who
burst into tears.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
COMMON SENSE AS A

tits, Bronchitis,
made this branch of
mcnts. We have eve
the organs involved,
scopes, spirometers, e
kinds of apparatus
atomizations, pulveri
approved medicinal q
We publish three
diseases, viz: A Urea
chitis; price, postpa
Phthisfc, giving new
ten cents; a treatise
two cents.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
| DISEASES OF
DIGESTION.

tri5uting in their
obscure, and are
physicians for 9th
to the removal of
Treatise on diseas
address on receipt
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
NOT ALWAYS MI

original system of diagnosis treat chronic
suation always glad patients and
then them institutions
with system of treatment yet have not
hundred whom have cured The
feet with which chemists enabled to deduce the
most departments
almost miraculous in the light of the early
telegraph greatest
Invention Is not marvellous degree of accuracy
exactly
marine cable nearly thousand miles long Our venerable
familiar with
the of nature that he accurately
Washington and fOretel
what the will in Florida New York well as il
between him and the
places named. all departments OF modern science,
- required is the knowledge of certain
L scientists deduce accurate
NeHN nj Also in medi
S~''S diseases certain unnistakabe
DISEASE 70 and a hT and IF p h a we
-a of determining, with the greatest accuracy,
the nature chronic diseases without seeing and personally
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
KIDNEY
DISEASES.

which our institution Ion
to a very extensive prac
Our specialists have acqu
ence, great expertness in
case, and, hence, have bt
remedies for the cure of c
The treatment of diseas
tuted q prominent brant
Invalids' Hotel and Surgi
ceipt of numerous inquil
the nature and durability
large illustrated treatise
any address on receipt of |
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-06-11
BLADDER
DISEASES.
NERVOUS
DISEASES.

CIOI1, drG CrGa1LUU Uy
eases with measure of success heret
See numerous cases reported in OF
phlets on nervous diseases, any one {
cents in postage stamps, when requ
with a statement of q case for conSu
which one of our Treatises to send.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05
Ten Thousand q Year.
From the Toronto Mail.

From the Toronto Mail.
When Mr. Bell Belmont, managers
the ST. Julien restaurant. in Kiags|
left his home in London, England, 81
teen years ago, he intended to go 1
Australia. En- route, he stopped 4
Toronto a few days, and thinking n
might go further and fare worse, he I'd
solved to remain here, and became en-
gagged in the hotel business. BeioH
leaving London he placed in charge
his father a number of shares he ha
acquired in certain railway, gas AM
water companies. At that time thes
shares were comparatively worthless
but as time wire on their value increas
ed, till at length they became a YER
considerable property. Besides b.
father and the shares referred to, Mi
Belmont also left at home u sister and
son.. The father died three or fou
years aiterward, and the sisters inqilr
les after her brother in Australia wsr'
of curse futile, and he was given a
for dead.
A few days ago Mr.. Boody, city clerk
received q letter from the sons soiicl
tors in London asking for q certifcas
of Mr.. Belmont's death. The city Glen
communicated this fact to Mr.. Belmon'
who o discovers that ne is the pos
SCISSOR Of a property composed OF ID
shares and dividend and interest sccru
ed thereto, amounting in all 70 an ID
come Of some $40, 900 year. Mr. Bel
mont made money in the White oa
Hotel which he carried on at the corne
OF Yonge and Elm-sts., but lost 1t agaln
and was spending his latter years :
somewhat reduced circumstance. !
appears hat he was not absolufeI
ignorant of the fortune belonging '
him in England, but for reasons know
to himself he never took pains to 10
claim to it.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05
Boycotting Tobacco chswsrs.


Thirteen charming young women o
Newark, N. j., have begun . crusade
against young men who chew tobacco.
They are banded together by a terrioN
oath never to allow the lips OF q tooae
co chewer to kiss their pure mouths
An able reporter represents o bionos
with luscious crimson lips, languishins
blue eyes, and a wirsoms face, ~
claiming, "Tc ill ones mouth WIZ
filthy tobacco, and then kiss the pufss
lips OF q woman. is-is-is-oh, l cao,
find words TO express my horror.
piquaRt little brunette, whose sparkhns
black eyes seemed to emit sparks .
electric fire. asserted that she hsa
three different young men, who wer
"real nice looking" kiss her while then
breatbs smelled Of "awful, awful nasN
tobacco" and for v q week thereM's
she felt compelled 10 continually ~.
her lips with a handkerchief in the van
hope of wiping off the stained kisseA
II may be a very real evil that the New.
ark young women are ORGANISMS
against, but, " it's o fair question, J.
should like TO know what kind OF younx
women these mnst be that confess y
Lending their lips to 80 much pronIsev
Gus kissing,
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05


Washington papers see no way OF
getting along until next December
without a session Of Congress. Their
snxicty il, ostensibly, for the public
business. but really for the interests Of
the capital city Of the nation, which is
apt to be somewhat dull in the summer,
though il contains $4,000 people and
. host Of government employees. Ho-
tells and boarding houses suffer most
during the interim, but all classes are
more or less affected. But whatever
may be the s~ituation Of the public bus,-
ness at the close of the present session,
it Is considered hardly within the range
OF the possibilities that an extra SEES
sion will be called.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05
ana v;ped his brow. The sltuAtion was

and wiped his brow. The situation was
getting decidedly desperate.
"My husband has beautiful teeth
remarked Mrs. st. George.
Mr.. McHugh caught at the words ~
a drowning man at q straw. He lifted
his huge mustache and showed that hii
were black and broken.
Mrs. st. George screamed, blushed
scarlet, and turned awaw her head.
Then she looked again, and this time
she was pale. mo- she said. slowly,
"those are not my husbands teeth. !
do not understand it, but ] must have
been mistaken"
James Healy, q master carpenter and
builder at No. DOT East One Hundred
and Fifth street, for whom st. George
worked for four years until Q month
ago. was in court prepared to swear
that McHugh was st. George.
"St. George had a peculiar
twitching of the muscles about
the eve" said Mr.. Heaiy, "as has
this man, aud 8 habit OF arching his
eyebrows, which were very bushy.
This mans eyebrows are bushy and he
arches them. The manner, size and
voice are all the same. The finger was
the only th ing that puzzled me. | have
talked with st. George q dozen times 0
day for four years, and ought to know
him pretty we'll"
A soventeen.year-old son OF Healy was
the only person acquainted with st.
George sru did not feel sure that he
and McHugh were identical. Pauline
Smith and Miss McNally, who bad
lived in the same house with st. George
for several years, swore that he was Nc
Hugh and Ntzhugh, was he.
Mrs. st. George finally admitted she
was mistaken. She is searching the
hospitals and the morgue for her hus-
band, who disappeared some time since
McHugh was in jail two days. he
admits having had a narrow escape
from becoming Mr.. st George.-N. Y.
Herald.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05
BEATS wILKIE COLLINS.
MT. McHugh's Marrow Escape from ne
coming Mr.. 81. George.


II have all the wives and children ]
want already" said Charles McHugh
yesterday to Justice Welde, and / new
er saw this woman before"
"Do you think / could live with a
nan eight years and not know some
thing about him?" came from Mrs. st.
George. Wouldn't / know him after
an absence of four weeks?H
The Justice thought she ought TO.
"If you don't believe me, Judge, LOOK
at the nail of the third finger on the
left hand and you will find that it is
turned TO the right"
That's SC" replied the sergeant.
Now brush away the hair on the back
of his head and you will find o c a
where he was struck with a hammer"
said Mrs. st. George, blushing, -four
years ago."
"There's a scar, sure enough" said
the Sergeant, excitedly. "That proves
it.D
"f you will examine his left thumb
carefully you will see the marks OF \
feion. which he had last winter"
The thumb showed unmistakable
evidence of having been affected in
something after that fashion.
why do you abandon your wife and
then deny that you are her husband %
asked Justice Welde.
Yes, why do you, Michael?" said
Mrs. st. George.
Il tell you | never saw her BEFORE
replied Charles, in an unhappy manner.
Then he asked hopefully, aHaye l syer
lost any o. my fingers?n
NO" said the woman, "you had
them all four weeks ago"
"See," said McHugh, triumphantly,
holding up the stump Of one finger.
Host that years ago"
"OP exclaimed Mrs. st. George.
you must have lost that within n
month, Michael; whatever have Won
been doing?"
But it couldn't heal in a month"
why, should know those hands
anywhere, observed Mrs. st. George;
but l have witnesses; bring on the
children with the air Of one starting
a procession. tie procession came on.
They were three pledges Of affection.
Tbs pledges oil ran to Ntzhugh, and
called hin, s,rrJs.r
Papa pulled out . handkerchief
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05

England is in trouble as she has al
ways been, on account Of meddiipg with
other nations. and her propensity for
territorial conquest, but that does not
prevent a continuance OF the ga as poll.
cy. The British government has lately
annexed all the islands south Of New
Guinea. between il and Australia, and
in south Africa has extended its domain
so as TO check the struggling propensi-
sies Of the Beers andt TO prevent any fur
ther advance OF the Germans toward
British territory. The English have
been very nervous lest the Germans
aad the troublesome Beers should come
together, and this annexation has doubt.
iesE been made in good part 10 prevent
thatpossibility.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05

Art thou thine own hearts conqueror'
Strive wei thus 10 be;
That lie the fight that is most sore,
The noblest victory.
Art thou beloved by one true hearth
o prize i'll il il rare;
There are so many in the mart
80 many false and fair,
Art thou alone? o say not sol
The world IL full, be sure;
There 10 70 much of want and woe
So much that thou cSnst cure.
Art thou in poverty thyselff
Thou still canst help a friend;
Kind words are more than any pelr,
Good deeds need never end
Art thou content in youth or ageY
Then let who will be great;
Thou hast the noblest heritage,
Thou hast the best estatei
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1885-02-05

Ashville. in the western part Of North
Uarolina, Is q favorite resort this year
for consumptives, who are q migratory
class. One year the rush rs TO one
place, and the next year toanother. As
TO Ashviiie it is said the beneficial effects
xre felt In most all cases soon after
reaching this bracing mountain air.
Very soon after arrival the appetite
improves, the cough moderates, night
sweats cease, and the patient enjoys
more refreshing sleep; and accompany
ing this improvement there is q feeling
Of increased strength and vigeE.