The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-10-04
THE WRONG SIMPSON.
An Apocryphal Chicago Story About So
ciety Entertainment In Indianapolis.


ciety Entertainment In indianapolis.
Chicago News.
A gentleman from Indianapolis remembers
and tells me little story of 1875, for the truth
of which he sufficiently vouches. Major Simpson
was the president of the Vandalia railroad. and
had recently removed to Indianapolis. Mr.. Rus
sell, the soul of genteel manners was man about
town whose somewhat precarious business made
him sometimes flush and sometimes very hard
up Mrs. Russell aspired to be leader in So
ciety, but, though she was very pleasing lady
and charming entertainer, her husbands rela-
tons with the sporting fraternity hindered her
grievously. One day Mr.. Russell informed his
spouse that he had made the acquaintance Of
Major Simpson, and that they had struck up n
pretty warm and seemingly mutual friendship.
'Oh, can't you invite him and his wife up
some EVENING"
~ think So"
"Do SO, and we will give a little party in their
honor
''Well, I will.B
Accordingly, the Major was invited and the
invitation was promptly accepted. A number of
the best people in Indianapolis were then noti-
Fed of the coming event and requested to lend
their presence to do honor to the president OF
great railroad. When the night arrived the
guests were promptly on hand in the beautiful
parlors, which had evidently been reftted at no
lnconsiderable expense, and had been tastefully
decorated with costly flowers. Soon the arrival
of Major and Mrs. Simpson was announced, and
a little subdued hutter ran through the assembly.
Mrs Russell requested her husband to see that
the Majors horses were taken care of and to in
vite the coachman into the kitchen out of the
cold but when Mr.. Russell went out he found
no horses, carriage, coachman. Major and
Mrs. Simpson had walked up. How strange.
How very eccentric!
Meantime Major and Mrs. Simnson had been
shown into the parlors and one after another OF
the guests presented. What an odd man, to be
sure, the Major was! Everybody else was in
full evening Dress while he was in very
shabby business suit, and wore a frayed collar
and an Enthusiastically soiled necktie And what
a fussy little woman Mrs. Simpson was! Every
color of the rainbow had place in her costume,
and she was altogether person who could not
be tolerated in that circle if she were not the
wife of great railroad president.
When the folding doors were drawn and the
table In the large dining-room exposed to view,
Mrs. Russells triumph was at hand. The table
was simply magnificent. Laden with every del
icacy that good taste and money could provide,
1T certainly was a pleasure to behold and il
seemed, as one of the enthusiastic guests re-
marked, almost sacrilege to disturb so divine
ly beautiful picture" However, it was made
| to be destroyed. so the guests were seated about
the roomy board and Major Simpson, at the post
of honor with his wife on his loft lost no time
in preparation, but began at once to break into
the pyramids of sandwiches and other solids
From the amount he ate the guests judged he
had been too busy with important railroad mat
tiers to go out to lunch or dinner that day, and
from the manner In which he ate they felt as
sured that he cared nothing for the convention
alities When he spread jelly on his sandwich,
daubing his knife to tie handle, they regarded
him eccentric, but when he licked his knife
from hilt to tip they were positively awed by
his genius. When the wine came Mrs Simpson
drank hers at single gup and, reaching over
the Majors plate, took his wine from its place
and drank that too, saying in All undertone to the
gentleman at her left: The Major hasn't drunk
drop for three months. and don't want him to
begin again.
Thus the evening was passed. At late hour
the guests departed, the ladies declaring that
Mrs. Simpson was positively awful, and the gen.
tlemen uniting on the proposition that the Major
might be a good railroad man, but he evidently
had seen very little of good society
1t was not until the next day that Mr.. Russell
learned that there were two Major Simpsons in
Indianapolis-one the president Of the Vandalia
road, and the other his guest of the night before,
person who had recently come to the city to
canvass for the sale OF some wo-penny patented
arrangement