davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12
Travelling Aphorisms.

We kick worn-out old purse which
we see in our pathway, until we hear
the clink of gold in it. and then we
clasp it to our bosoms.
Other peoples tears are little drops
of salt water; our own are rolling
floods of bitterness and woe.
A baby comes to us on angels wings,
but it hangs the wings up in dark
closet when its feet have once touched
the earth.
A beautiful polished shoe may hide 3
painful corn.
The selfish mans stomach ia larger
than his heart.
That man is weak. indeed, who can
not lift his eyes to Heaven.
One hair in the butter does not con-
denim the roll.
A woman doesn't have to dance very
long until her knees are too stiff to
bend in prayer.
The devil paints his most alluring
pictures on . background of gold.
1t takes long time for he to fade
There's more honesty in the wag of .
dogs tail than In the shake Of mans
sand.-Asruhans Ivovs!sr.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

How q Couple of Florida Turtles Managed
to Trade Shells.
II had soft-shell turtle once" said the
Major, shat could beat any turtle on a
trade ever saw. Where l lived the pond
on ray place was very small one, and in
GUNNER time got pretty low, especially il
the season was very dry one. The sum-
mer was very dry one in 1871, and Judas,
which was the name of my turtle, and he
was little fellow-wouldn't weigh over
eight pounds-had bad time of it. The
fieas stung him so badly that he was in a
fever most all the time. One day l was
walking down by the pond when / noticed
him and big turtle talking very earnestly
together. stepped behind atree so that
they couldn't see me, and watched the fun.
Judas was trying to get the land tnrtle to
trade shells with him. They argued long
time, and was afraid Judas wasn't going
to make it, Presently bright idea
seemed to strike him. He whispered to old
hard-shell, the latter nodded yes, and then
Judas went into the pond. When he came
out he had young gosling that had got
killed somehow, and he had stored it away
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12
BAcKwooDs JUSTICE.

An Old but Good Story Revived--A Judge
Who Knew His Business.
In certain backwoods community sus-
picious character had been arrested for
cattle-stealing. The general impression in
the community was that he had stolen the
COW, and public sentiment was strongly
against him. The unfortunate fellow sent
to neighboring town for lawyer, and
when his trial came up he was represented
by able counsel The Judge looked upon
the lawyer with suspicion. and seemed to
feel that his presence was entirely unneces-
sary. He assumed an unusual amount of
dignity, and called the court to order
Having been in the Superior Court a few
times he had caught an idea OF how GRIM
inals were tried there, so he arraigued the
prisoner, and demanded: 'Guilty or not
guilty" The prisoner responded mot
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

It In the smoking-car, seated right in
front of me, were couple of countrymen,
evidently prosperous farmers. They were
talking politics, and pretty soon one said to
the other:
"'By the way, Jones, am thinking of
running for the Legislator this fall. Can
count on your support"
mo
90 Why, thought you were friend of
mine@
C SO am, and that is just the reason
I'm agiu you for the Legislature Chi
ca10 Herald.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12
True Friendship.

II heard bright thing out West the 9TH
er day." remarked commercial traveller,
"and it pleased me so much that l have re-
membered it on purpose to tell you. 1t was
a little thing, but good what there was of
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

NO M88ns
A nice, common, everyday dude was
stupidity masquerading. his form along St
Clair street last night, when handsome
woman put her head out of a second-story
window and said:
''Babyr
The dude wavered, almost sunk with q
sickening boom. stuck the eye-glass into his
right optic, glared up at the window, smiled
nauseatingly and said:
"Weally, now, We know. Pom my word,
a mashr'
''Come, baby, come" said the woman at
the window.
"Weally, ye know" gasped the dude, Il
cahn't I'm on me way to see me curly,
ye know"
A little child, spattered with mud and its
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

sweet blue eyes flashing with indignation,
''sized up" the dude for moment, then
stopped to the ground, seized q rock and
said:
"Twit taughtin' to my muzzer, you
blamed old dudeT
No masb.-Cleueland Platndedler.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

A CONSERVATIVE Appetite.
$50 you don't care to go to Kansas" said
an Arkansaw immigration agent address
ing an old negro.
"No, sab. De- tells me dat da haster eat
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

ger needed a nurse and Malviny applied in
person for the position.
''Have you had any experience taking
care of children?' asked Mrs Yerger.
HAS had any 'sperience wild childrunsf
/ should say had lots OBJ hit Why, Dress
your soul, tuck car. OBJ one chile for
twenty yeahs; yes, mum, l did. De parents
OBJ dat infant dey jess wushuped me, dey
did."-Teras Sifttngs.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12
PURELY VISIONARY.

A Few People That "Puck" Would Like
! to 6ec Taxing n Vacation. ButIt u Too
) Good Evef.to Come True.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12
A Faithful Domestic.

An old colored woman named Malviny
had heard that it was great recommends
ton for servant If she had remained o
number of years in one family. Mrs. Yer
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12

renamed and called Cholerado. Are you
ready for the question!-Boston Poe.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12
A QUEER TRADE.

How Couple of Florida Turtles Managed
to Trade Shells.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1885-12-12


pump her and keep her afoat until we
could get to land, but my wife said if
| remained on board she would. so /
left. 1t would have been of no use,
though; the leak was too large The
poor Ferris! 1t was too bad to lose her;
but. thank God, Belle is safe.'
when the master finished speaking
Captain Lund was in tears. l never
saw him so affected in my life All he
said was, Thank God l did save her.
If she is representative of your Ameri-
can women you have won fortune in
knowing her worth. / am an English
man, but / tell you frankly l don't be-
lieve there is woman in all England
that could have done as much
The officers then returned to their
duties. but later in the day were all
introduced to the young lady. She told
us that she was but eighteen years of
age, and came from Ellsworth, Me.
She spoke gravely concerning their
narrow escape, saying little in regard
to their losses. That was of little con-
sequence; both had their health, and
could work together for a living /
asked if they had any money. She said:
Ten dollars in change is all we have
This got noised among the crew. and
all with generous impulse wished to
contribute something to help the couple
out. We gathered forty-five dollars be-
fore Boston was reached. Superintend-
emit Furber of the Boston & Maine Road,
hearing OF their condition, sent them
free passes to her home, and today the
couple reach there. / believe. "-Boston
Globe.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
MINNEAPOLIS GLOBULES.

Company A will be inspected tonight.
This week will bring on the harvest of
commencement
The June meeting of the board of trade
| will be at 10 o'clock. instead OF II as usual.
The library board will hold a regular
meeting tomorrow evening at 5 o'clock.
Several of the standing committees of the
city council will meet at the city hall to-day.
A very entertaining exhibition OF all the
classes of Prof. Kinderoster was given at
| Turner hall last evening.
Yesterdays excursion train to Mime
| tonka was the last one. Regular Sunday
| trains will be run hereafter.
The writings of T. B. Aldrich were dis
cussed by the Saturday Night club at the
| residence of Mr.. and Mrs. Conant.
There was no meeting of the Land league
| last night The next regular meeting will
| be held on next Sunday week, June IA. 4
The excellent program published in the
SUNDAY GLOBE was given by the Aar-
monte society to pleased audience last
evening.
George N. Morgan post, G. A. R., went
out to Lakewood cemetery yesterday after
| noon and conducted the funeral services OF
| Mai. J. H. Donaldson.
| Of the S25, 600 required to retain the Col
| lege hospital in Minneapolis. $50, 600 has
been subscribed and the remainder will be
forthcoming soon.
| Commencing this morning the Minneap-
oils & st. Louis trains will be discontinued
at the union depot and will run from the
new depot at Third street and Fourth ave
nue. north.
AS predicted by several gentlemen inter-
viewed nv the GLOBE last week, Inspector
Ouinby has resigned. The fighting with
the contractor made his life altogether too
sultry for comfort.
The paving of Second avenue south has
been carried to nearly Sixth street. Some
Nous persons were shocked at the situation
which made work necessary on Sixth street
Yesterday afternoon.
Word was received yesterday of the death
of little daughter of e. w. Griffin Of this
city at Kukhaven. where the family are
snending the summer. The child was a
niece of n. F. Warner.
Fhe funeral of Eugene Lehmaier took
place Yesterday morning from the family
residence, 423 Second avenue north. There
was large aItcnudilCe VI IllcHue oliu "
profuson of floral tributes
A South Minneapolis paper says that part
of the city was the scene Oh W ednesday
last of Mormon conference. presided over
by William NJ. Palmer of Utah, at which
three converts were reported from Mime
apolis. two of them being women.
w. j. Reese, state secretary OF the An
cient Order of Hibernians, has called a
state convention to be held in this city
Tuesday. June Is. One of the principal
objects of the meeting, to which each Kvis-
ion is invited to send FIVE delegates, is a
conference concerning plan of mutual in
surance to be established.
The boy who was arrested with the trio
of chicken thieves has confessed the whole.
The day of the arrest they sold to various
parties fully 200 pounds Of dressed chickens.
One man had $3.50, another S12.40 and
the bow had S6.12 as his portion of the
swag. Sergt. Kirkham took the kid out
YESTERDAY to look up another party impli-
Gated in the traffic, but no further arrests
were made.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
YOUNG MEN

Who may be suffering from nervous debility
will do well to avail themselves of this, tho
greatest boon ever laid at the altar of suffer-
ing humanity.
DR. SPINNEY WILL GUARANTEES TO FORFEIT
FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS for every case OF
weakness or disease of any kind or character,
which he undertakes and fails to cure. Hd
would therefore say to the unfortunate suf-
ferer who may read this notice, that you are
treading on dangerous grounds when you
longer delay in seeking the proper remedy for
your complaint. You may be in the FIRST
stage-Remember that you are approaching
the last. If you are bordering on the last and
are suffering some or all of its ill effeets, re-
member that if you obstinately persist in pro.
crastination the time must come when the
most skillful physician can render you no as.
sistance; when the door Of hope will be closed
against you; when no angel of mercy can
bring you relief. In no case has the Doctor
failed of success. Then let not despair work
itself upon your imagination, but avail your
self of the beneficial results of his treatment
before your case is beyond the reach OF medi'
cal skin, or before grim death hurries you ia
8 premature grave.
Piles Cured without Using KNIFE OF
I,iUatur0.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
Use and abuse Of the Body.

Rev. j. II. futile of the Church of the
Redeemer delivered an address yesterday
afternoon before the Reform club, in Har-
rison hall, on The Body, Its Uses and
Abuses. Rev. Tuttle is one of the most
eloquent of the Minneapolis pulpit orators,
and the knowledge that he was to speak
sufficed to fill the hall. A short service of
song was given by the choir Of the club as
a preface to the lecture, which lasted about
an hour. AS the title of the lecture and its
place of delivery would indicate, it was of
the nature of a temperance talk, not rabld
and radical, but pleasant, rational and
enjoyable discourse, treating the subject
from a religious as well as physiological
standpoint. He maintained the body was
Gods temple and must be,kept pure and
undefiled. and that nothing could defle it
more than an incorporate use of its powers.
He made numerous opposite quotations
from scripture, and made, withal, one OF
the best addresses in the cause ever heard
within the walls of Harrison hall.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01

quarantined for good reason. The importa-
ton of Texas cattle by rail is absolutely
forbidden, and as the Texas men
are hampered by trail difficulties
in the Northwest all stock
from this region is practically shut out.
The quarantine is generally regarded as
device OF the big herdsmen to preserve the
public lands of Mantana for their own cat
tie. The cry of overstocked ranges has
been loudly sent up for year or more past
and on some of the ranges the roundup as
sociations have publicly given notice tina
they would admit no more cattle to round
up privileges, while at the same time they
were adding to their own herds. The set
tiers, woolgrowers and small stockmen OF
Eastern Montana are now confronted with
a power which, it is freely alleged, seeks to
monopolize what remains of the public
lands and which may lead to trouble as
serious as the fence cutting difficulties Of
the Southwest. Their legislation last
winter showed the desire of the stOckmen
to control the territory and a few slight
collisions that have occurred between sheep
herders and cowboys give warning of what
the future may bring forth as the crowd
ing process continues. A. L. 0.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
MIDDLE-AGED MEN

There are many at the age from 50 10 Se
who are troubled with frequent excavations
of the bladder, often accompanied by slight
smarting or burning sensation and weaken
ing the system in manner the patient can
not account for On examining the urinary
deposits ropy sediment will often be found,
and sometimes small particles of albumen win
appear, or the color will be of thin, or milk.
lsh hue, again changing to dark and torpie
appearance. There are many men who die OF
this difficulty, ignorant of the cause, which II
the second stage of weakness OF Gne vital or.
gans DIR. S. will guarantee perfect cure ln
all such cases, and a healthy restoration OF
these organs.
Only one interview requiredin the majority
of cases. Balance of treatment can Dc taken
at home without any interruption to business
All letters or communications strictly CONT.
Dental. Medicines packed SO as not 10 excits
curiosity and sent by express, if full descrip.
ton of case is given, but personal inter
view in all cases preferred.
OFFICE HOURs-9 to IL q. m, and l TO ana
to D. m. Sunday, o to 10 q. m. only. Com
sultation free.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01

Judge J. II. Brown of Willmar is at the

Judge J. II. Brown of Willmar is atthe
NicOllet.
George Andrews, U. S. A., is registered
at the West.
Judge Lochren to-dav goes to Wright
county to hold court.
B. M. Jenkins of the Canada Cracker
company is at the West.
A. B. Kelly of Mortified was in the city
over Sunday, stopping at the National.
James Hay and wife, Edward Walden of
Philadelphia, are registered at the West
hotel
G. O. Wheeler, leading real estate man
of Fergus Falls, was in the city yesterday.
E. w. Fairman has gone to Dubuque for
a few days, where he was called to attend
to important property matters.
Mrs. M. G. Purvis of Concordia parish,
La. has arrived in Minneapolis and will
make this city her future residence.
A. B. Needham, the city jailer, who has
been laid up with rheumatism, has suffi-
GENTLY recovered to resume his duties.
w. d. Sanborn, general agent, and ]. II.
Best. general freight and ticket agent, OF
the Kansas City and st. Louis divisions OF
the Chicago, Burlington & Quincy road, are
in the city.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01

great corner stone of all true love. There
are in the world women great, good and
grand enough to stand out as shining exam
ples to the growing girls of to-day. and
toward them he directed the attention Of
the young ladies before him.
In concluding he said he had spoken only
practical truths, and if he had hurt any
ones feelings, he begged their pardon, but
would not take it back. He had endeavored
to point out the follies of fashions tyranny
and hold UP bright ideal OF womanhood,
and if he succeeded, his work was accom-
plished. He wanted to emancipate women
from the slavery of fashion and make them
unlike the girl who prayed, "Oh, God, bless
my father and mother and make them strong
and good. And dear Lord, bless me, too,
and make me StyliSh."
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
MINNEAPOLIS COURTS.
District Court.
SPECIAL TERM CALENDAR.
Before Judge KoOn.

SfEClAL Term CALENOAh.
Before Judge Koon.
William J. Moore VS.. George E. Wilson;
dismissed.
l.. Powers VS.. j. FL. Tousley ct al. !;
stricken from the calendar.
P. B. Christian VS.. NJ T. Salisbury, de-
PENDANT, w. A. Rogers, garnishee; dis
missed.
N. Anderson VS.. Ida S. Anderson; tried
and Judgment ordered for plaintiff.
Grygla & Selden VS.. Lee Spear; stricken
from the calendar.
Frederick Mckenzie as survivor, ETC., VS..
Thomas L. Rosser; same
QFoster & Leim vs. Joseph Stanchfeld;
no appearance of parties; default entered.
Eliza GOwen, Administrative, VS.. the eS-
tate of Albert N. Gowen, deceased, VS..
Frank L. G0wen; order made appointing
receiver.
S. M. Finch VS.. III. M. Jamison; new
trial denied.
Cases Continued Cummings, Smith &
Co. VS.. George III. Johnson, defendant;
George r. Newell & Co., garnishee. L.
Baily & Son VS.. AL. Menard ct al; David
Alexander VS.. Elizabeth Alexander; AL
Der L. Hatcher VS.. Hanford l.. Gordon;
Simonson Bros, Newyard & Co. VS.. Alice
P. Morrill, ct al; Briggs & Huse VS.. Arthur
Densmire; Sabra Moses VS.. James FL.
Moses; Charles F. Warner, garnishee, VS..
James Stoddart; R. A Peet VS.. Bertha
Peet; M. t. Salisbury VS.. w. A. Rogers e;
al; A. D. Folsom VS.. William B. McCluret
J. W. Whitmier VS.. F. II. White; Julia L;
Baldwin VS.. Nellie p Anderson ct al.
Deenie E. Stafford VS.. William G. Stafford.
George w. Wyman VS.. Northern Pacific
Railway Co.; Essene d Hopper VS.. C. II.
Colgrove; Essene & Hopper VS.. Albert
Cawrence; Julia E. Thompson VS.. George
II. Thompson; June assignment of Mime
G. Mellen. ct al; II. L. Woodburn VS.. W.
N. Holway; Mamie E.. Wilde VS.. Albert
Knittle; Wilson & Bradbury VS.. Norman
B, Harwood; w. W. Kimball Co. VS.. Joel
M. Taylor; June assignment of Melaney;
Kyle & Co.; Ann W. johnson VS.. Charles
81. Van Doren and E. B. Galusha.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01

and it was probably owing to short notice
that more were not present to hear her.
Owing to the fact that so few ladies were
present Mrs. Hyde decided to postpone her
lecture and instead gave several recitations,
rather than disappoint the audience, small
as it was. A young lady from st. Paul, a
pupil of Mrs. Hyde, also gave a
recitation, which was well received Prof
Mowray suggested the Decoration of Sol
diers' Graves as topic for discussion, and
followed with an address in which he adj
vocated the abolition of the custom unless
the decorating is to be extended to the
Confederates. Mr.. Brosnan and J. P. Nc
Gaughey also made remarks in which they
concurred in the opinions of the first
speaker.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
SUNDAY DECORATIONS.
The Way MinneapOlitans Enjoy a
Day of Rest.
AT THE BEACT


The exodus of people by the thousand for
favorite country resorts yesterday threat
ened to almost desert the city. There were
some seven hundred who attended the
Danz-Seibert excursion to MinnetOnka
Beach. 1t was delightful day. The
weather contributed all it could toward the
pleasures of the occasion, and everybody
who went out enjoyed the event hugely.
St Paul was literally represented. The
double orchestra, stationed at the large pa
vilion, discoursed popular and exceed
ingly fine program, which occupied the Ell
tire time of the stay at the lakeside, with
the usual intermissions. Refreshments were
served by ST. Paul caterer, and every lit
tie detail which goes to make things pleas
ant and agreeable was studioIsly attended
to. Many were the fishing parties that
trolled the lake, but they failed to make
catches of very remarkable extent; yet they
enjoyed the sport just as well. and returned
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
The Manitoba's Answer.

The answer of the Manitoba road to the
petition of the Minneapolis & st. Louis
road, asking for an injunction restraining
the former road from removing certain
track claimed by the latter road, has been
served. A denial is made that the Mime
apolis & st. Louis road has inherited from
the st. Paul & Pacific company any rights
as alleged in the complaint or that the Min
neapolis & st. Louis has any right to the
right of way or grounds Of the Pacific COM
pany. 1t is admitted that the Minneapolis
& st. Louis road has purchased land and
erected freight houses between Third and
Sixth streets north, but it is denied that the
land was purchased with the right to use
the tracks. 1t claimed further that the
defendant 1.-THE Manitoba road) finds it
necessary to change the grade of certain
streets in the vicinity so that they shall
cross above the tracks. Without removing
the Disputed track the proposed changes
cannot be made A decree of the court is
therefore asked that the plaintiff shall have
title to the track described.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-06-01
From the Reverend clergy.

Among the many ministers of the gospel
who have been helped by Browns Iron
Bitters, the Rev. E. A. Spring, Corydon,
Ia. saws: 81 used it for general ill-health
and found it great help" Rev. James
McCarty, Fort Stevenson. OAK, says, 1T
cured me of severe dyspepsia and increased
INV weight twenty-five pounds" The Rev.
Mr.. Offey, New Bern, N. c., says he has
taken it, and considers it one of the best
medicines known. The Rev. Mr. Whitney,
bingham, Wis, says, 'After long sick
ness from lung fever used Browns Iron
Bitters and gained strength" So through
out the states with hundreds and hundreds
of other clergymen.