The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1885-02-26


We are indebted to a correspondent
for the following stories:
If not too late for army stories, here's
one that has never been recorded:
Jim B belonged to the 43rd Indi-
ana Infantry, and while stationed at Hele-
ma, Ark, was detailed to stand guard in
front of Gen. G-'s headquarters. Jim
was not noted for fastidiousness in dress,
and did not present a handsome appear
ance. Soon after he went on duty Gen.
G. came out for a stroll in front of his
quarters. Jim saluted the General prop
erly. and then the following colloquy oc-
Cured between them:
GEN. G.-"What regiment do you be-
long to?"
JIM-"43d Indiana"
GEN. G.-"Why don't you blacken
your shoes?"
JIM-"Haint no blackin'."
GEN. G.-"Why don't you get black
ing?"
JIM-"Haint no money"
GEN. G.-(handing Jim a ten centpos-
taD Here, take this and buy backing,
and don't come on duty with such shoes
again."
Jim received the money, thanked the
General and again started to walk his
beat, but a sudden idea seemed to strike
him, and turning to the General who
had strolled on, cried out. "Say, Giner-
al, if you'll give me five cents more I'l
get one of those id paper collars, and
dress up right"
Gen. G. grasped the situation, and
very quietly walked back and produced
the amount required, in consequence of
which Jim came on duty next relief
dressed up right"
If I ever saw this in print, l had for
gotten it at the time 1 heard it: Sever
al soldiers were one day sitting on the
river bank in front of our camp at Hele-
ma, when they got to telling the wonders
they had seen since they came downt the
river. One told of having seen river
birds (king fishers) setting on their nests
in holes along the bank, with their heads
sticking out. The question was discuss
ed as to how deep these birds penetrated
the banks, and opinions differed. Final.
ly Bill G. was called upon as an Eek
pert" Bill said the only knowledge he
had on the subject was, that he had no.
ticed one place along the river where
the bank had been washed away and he
saw king fishers holes sticking out more
than twenty feet over the water, and had
knocked several of them off by throwing
Jumps of coal from the boat.
Here's one for the little folks corner
"One day during the past summer I saw
a peculiar whirlwind in the street il
front OF our house. 1t began with a gen
tie stirring OF the dust, but grew rapidly
in strength and velocity, until a column
of dust about the circumference of a foul
barrel, and so thick as to be ~impenatra
bic to the sight, stood upright to the
height of twenty feet and whirling very
rapidly. This column seemed to remain
stationary for perhaps a minute, wher
it commenced rising and charging it,
circumference until dissipated in the air
1t was indeed a strange and pretty freal
of the wind, and 1 was so much interest
ed therein that 1 was not aware tina
c. and J, aged respectively fv,
and three years, who were playing in tn,
yard, had also witnessed the spectacle
After the '-show" was over, j sail
to his sister, G., what was that p
Dust" answered c.. eyes, Iknoy
it was dust; but what made it go up tina
way"? Goods takin' it up to make pee
ple," was G's orthodox solution g
the phenomenon, after q moments re
Election.