Daily Republican. [volume] ([Wilmington, Del.]) 1874-1890, 1885-06-25
MIRTH AND MEKkIMENT.

And the assurance thoy nave aH thoy
neod.
MIRTH AND MEKKlMENT.I
A bashful young man having intims
ted to young lady that, II circum
STANCES were favorable. he should like
TO ESQ her home" she kindly informed |
him that, a. it was bright moonlight |
light. she thought the circumstance
were decidedly favorable, and that II |
ne would step around TO No. " Blank
street, he could see her home" stand
| ing there al In in its glory, bathed In
the siivery beams Of the moon. But
tie young man didn't take advantage
ofthe favorable circumstances.
Sweetly Explained.-"I wish l was a
| STAR" he said, SID ling at his own po-
etc fancy. az would rather you were
a comet" she said dreamily. Hts
heart beat umultously. "And why
he asked, tenderly, and nj the same
| time taking her unresisting little hand
| In his own" and why ?" he repeated
imperiously. "Oh," she said, with a
brooding earnestness that fell upon his
soul like bare feel on cold oilcloth, be-
cause then you would come round only
once every fifteen hundred years"
An absent-minded clergyman, wnen
a couple called on him TO be married,
began to read the burial service, begin
ming in solemn voice -" Man that Is
born of woman is of few days and full
of trouble" The bridegroom interrupt
ed the minister, telling him Of the seri
Ious mistake he had made. We'll"
was the reply. il you insist upon 1t
will! marry you. of course but, be-
believe me, you had better let me 60 on
and bury you"
Political Jones says " The pr0fusiOn
and color of her hair would lead one to
look upon H. a. though 1t was spun by
the nimble fingers Of the easy hours as
they glided through bright June days,
whose sunny rays Of light had been
caught in the meshes and were to go no
, further" Smith expressed the same
thing by saying Her hair was aw'
fully red"
Miss GnshinetOn Ito vounp widow
whose husband has left large fortune)
IT, That IL the fourteenth mourning cos
tune have seen you wear in three
Idays, and each lovelier and more be
coming than the other" Young widow
oh my dear, have forty but such
, a bother as they were to be made AT
l ono t1m6 i alTlOHL %louou tudU poo
George hadn't died %
A self-acting sofa, Just enough TO
two, has been invented. If pr peri,
wound up, 1t will begin to ring {
) warning bell Just before ton O'Clock.
minute after ten 1t splits apart, ant
while one half carries the daughter o
the house up stairs, the other half kick
!, her young man out Of doors. They viii
snh hnt II a have than
Il An Irish lawyer having addressed
[ the court az gentlemen instead o
L" YER honors" after he had concluded
La brother of the bar reminded him of hi
Terror. He Immediately rose and apollo
luzed thus: May it please the court
lin my haste of debate l called yer hoi
ors gentlemen. made mistake, ye
honOrs. =" The speaker then sat down
"My dear," said lady to her hui
band. " these friends here will nc
believe me when | say I'm only fort
p wears old, You know that / speak tn
truth, don't you 2" !" certainly sha
not deny Tiny love, since you ha,
stuck to the point for the last doze
years, TO my certain knowledge.
What brute!
He was just on the point of proposin
and she, with a palpitating heart, wa
straintng her ear TO catch the words ST
so longed 10 hear, when q little moui
ran across the floor. " Did she screa
or faint 2" you ask. Oh, no, gentle II
lauirer, she did not She paid no o
tention to the mouse.
Yes, you may come again ne
L Sunday evening, but" And 81
- hesitated. What Is it, darling Hay
given you pain 2" he asked, as 81
still remained silent. You didn
mean to, I'm sure" abe responde
but next time please don't wear o.
Of those collars with the point turnil
outward.
"Can you tell me" said rich you
fop.to poor but beau 'iful girl, WI
1t is that ladies' nowadays look 30 mu
to money in the matter of marriage
She looked him coelly over and snsw'
ed: ~ suppose it is because they
seldom find anything else in m
= worth having"
"Oh, Chawles," sighed the poetic
Miss Raveile, al yearn for the BALI
spring, when can HE me to the v
- Idant lawn, and battle in the yellow IA
x of the setting sun." 81 would bat
in something more substantial, and Il
make IL quite 40 public" said the p
no sale young man.
m In an action for breach OF promise
'A' defendants counsel asked the ia
as plaintiff "Did your client enter II
-, 20 -itive agreement to marry yos
W "Well, not exactly" she replied -"
,ey he courted me good deal, and told I
sister that he intended to marry In
1t our family"
. a "Your daughter? Is 1t possibl
Why, you look like twin sisters
cy. " No; l assure you she Is my OF
daughter" replied the pleased moth
TX Aud the polite old gentleman spoiled
all by remarking +" Well, she certa
ly looks old enough to be your siste
lr Jones, who 10 In bad health, but
- 4 proving, returns home. The wife of
bosom Well, how are you now
Jones "Bstter. In fact, feel gu
apother man." Wife: "I'm glad
~ hear 1t. was getting tired of the
Lone" Jones continues to improve.
- ~ preserve my equilibrium unt
- all circumstances" she WAS heard
W say, in pause of the music, to the Il
haired youth who was her escort. %
your" he answered softly. Mot
cans hers" Then the music resum
nYeu are now one," said the mi ais
IA to happy pair he had just tied