The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1885-04-23
THE MERRY SIDE!

They found a in Georgia the other day who
a Colonel and they didn't know by what title
call him until they found out he was Major-Gen-
eral. (He had been Corporal in the army0
The man who said "the world is made up of little
things,' was not gifted philosopher. The same
might be said of hotel bed.
A kid followed Jackson boy to school day last
week and they didn't drive him off-because school
is the proper place for kids.
OF course, Americans are opposed 10 any in
Europe, but If they will fight there, we must
stihe sobs long enough to that they do not
lack for provisions or guns.
The citizens of Seymour, Indiana, took tramp
printer out of jail and horsewhipped him. They are
said to have left very good impression upon him.
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We have all heard Of the religious cranks who
dressed in white robes, and all day appoint
ed day waiting for the second coming of the Savior
That reminds one of the condition of Senator Payne
and the coal oil gang of Ohio. They have appointed
the time for the spois to to Ohio, and sit
ting and waiting-but salvation cometh not.
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man in Hamilton County has established dog
farm where choice breeds of dogs will be raised
sale. The neighbors are selling their sheep.
The Post says several Cincinnati reporters were
ashamed of felow-reporter because he had so much
cheek. 1t is time to put up the shutters.
-.
Another member of the Illinois Legislature dead
The deadlock to be proving fatal to the De-
mocracy. All the Republican side wants to do is
wait, and let Retribution do Its work.
We are told that the snobby Minister Phelps "has a
coat of arms This alone would rebound to the glory
of the United States the Court of st. James, but
this is not all. In addition to coat of arms he
has pants of legs.
"Ex-secretary Frelinghuysen lies in uncon-
scous stupor," says dispatch. Were he Demo-
cratic politician, now, he would not have TO be un-
conscious to do that.
A New York house has received orders for twenty
five thousand undershirts for Russia. This looks
like they were getting ready for the fight.
Senator Payne never found out how little and in
significant he until he pecped his spectacles
at President Cleveland.
San Francisco woman tried to shoot herself, but
missed, and her heartless husband laughed. Then
she shot him, and killed him. A few tears at the
proper moment, would have saved his life.
A colored man in Wilmington, Delaware, ate oil
obtained rom boiling dead dogs until he got hydro
phobia This is the first instance on record of ex-
tracting the bark from dog.
Out In NlncenneS Indiana. a school teacner sued q
newspaper correspondent. This is worse specula-
tion than boring for natural gas.
The proprietors of skating Kinks in New York have
held meeting for the purpose of 'eevating' roller
skating. Don't do 1t, friends! There's enough "ele
walton" about the Kinks now.
:" 81"
A Cincinnati paper says 1.-The police are arresting
all suspicious characters That story wont do.
Half the city would have be converted into GALA
boose.
The Gallipolis Journal says miss Salie Jones has
Quilt begun in 1872 containing S22sO4 pieces, and is
only half fnished.'' There several generations
subject the asylum yet before that quilt is finished
4:
Fame sometimes meets with backsets. How dis
couraging to plant young tree sacred to the mem
ory Of" and have the tree bitten of by a bob
tailed COW with broken horn.
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JEFF. Davis denies that he wrote sympathetic let
ter to Gen. Grant. Thank you, JEFF