The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1885-08-25
lN0lCHECEE, N0SWASHE.

lN0GHECKE, NOW ASHE|
ANISrEREsTrNe CASE ~ COURT
WITH chinamsn for Presseutcrs-A Almond
Eyed yhseloey and Basipsis atstheds
yeniilatsd IN Squire Asitie's Court
Last Evening i'm Lees Sore GSs.s a
The funniest case on record was heard
in Squire Ankles court last night. Yes
terday forenoon young fellow named
George Bennett, accompanied by a friend
Of his own age, named Bauter, Event into
the Chinese laundry on Market street
week to be washed. Heslid he'had lost his
check, and the proprietor, Jim Lee, told
him "No checkee, no washee." Bennett
insisted on getting the shift, and Jim be;
ing IS firm in bis refusal, Bennett b!acked
hiseye, knocked out o window and depart
ed. re
Jim gwore out a warrant, aud the case
came up before Squire Arkle at r. N.
Bennett resisted Constable Lauchltn when
arrested, and was arraigned on three
charges, assault and battery, resisting an
officer and Drunkenness.
Colonel Atnett and Robert Marshall
represented the defense, and Denis
lO'Keefe the prosecution. Colonel Arnett
objected to the warrant because It had
been sworn out by q Chinaman, and de-
\ manded an examination as to whether
| Jim Lee understood the nature and ohll-
CATION Of an oath. Right there the fun
started.
4 Joe Lee, OF thelaundry on the corner
Of Fourteenth and Market streets, was
sworn as interpreter. Col. Arnett de-
manded that he also bs catecllised as to
the binding character OF an oath. Joe
had evidently been there before. Hewas
asked :,se
apo you understand the nature and OBJ
legation OF an oath? ~
This was TOO much for Joe. "Ate dom
know" he answered. :.
The question was changed: "What Il
you should swear to tell the truth and
then tell alie?"
N"Dh, me no talkee bumbngpyl Me
good boy"
"Bptit you should lie2"
mo; me tellee trut." J.,
"But what would happen II you did lie"
"DIe swear telle truf-me telle lie-die
tonight
"Ifyou tell a lie, you will die tonight,
4 2" asked Col. Arnett. !.
"Me go court-court hurt me-go jail
The justice thought Joe was competent
to take the oath.
!. Then the fun began anew. The same
questions were put 70 Jim Lee through
Joe, with much less satisfaction.
"Ask him II he believes in the existence
of God" said Col. Arnett.
Joe shook his head, and said: Me talk
MCLEAN; me no talk adat." ~
This raised laugh at the Colonel's
expense.
said:
"When2 Now2"
Finally Joe said Jim and he both knew
about the Good Man, and that Jim went
to Church, while he seldom did.
.What does he 60 to church for?n'
A Colonel Arnett asked.
IT dom know; aska he," Joe said.
H Alter he was made to understand, Joe
translated the question, and then the
answer:
$50 God, he helpee-a me-"
This satisfied the Squire, and in spite OF
Col. Arnott's protests, the hearing pro-
ceeded.
Jim's story, as interpreted by Joe, was
about as the circumstance Is narrated
above. Joe said: "About 'leven ding
dong clock data young fellow come in
disa young fellow, askee SHIFT. Jim say,
no tinee, no checkee. Data young fellow
say no get shirt, hurta disa young fellow.
Jim he say, no. Data young fellow hurta
Jim bout tree lickee.p
3"Did he hit Jim2' asked Counsellor
4 0'Keetfe.
"I.ooka dat eyelr exclaimed Joe, point.
ing to Jim's right optic, which instead OF
being almond-shaped, was about the shape
and color Of an egg plant. The story was
told over and over without developing
anything new,
Then John Lee, Jim's partner, was
sworn, and put through the preliminary
catechism. Being asked II he should
swear to lie in a China court, where he
would 20 to when he died, John said;
"Siam.a 8 y.
John said after Bennett hithim, the for.
"W6at did Beuter dosp asked ool. Ar
aHe helpa him tled," Joe translated the
answer.
After over an hour Of CONCLUSIVE merri.
ment for the large crowd assembled,
| Squire Ankle fined BENNETT IS and costs
| for the assault on the washee-man, 81 and
costs for being drunk, and required him
to give bond in the sum OF $3.50 for his
appearance at Court to answer to the
charge Of resisting an officer. s
ApOpular Ex,o0nted.
The surviving soldiers at Caldwell, O.,
and in Noble county are trying to raise
$40, 000 to build q private soldiers monu.