Beverly banner. [volume] (Beverly, N.J.) 1877-1964, 1885-10-10


will learn.
1t is often the man who is right
that is left.
Conceit may puf'a man up, but never
prop him up.
When has man four hands When
he doubles his fists
A man does not become old until the
years strike his heart
An investment in knowledge always
pays the best interest.
The longest life is too short to show
us how little we know.
If the fire bell rings false alarm,
can it be called libel?
One VINO takes lots of interest in his
business-the pawnbroker.
The purest kiss-a mothers; the
coolest "a mother-in-law's
Advice is seldom welcomed. Those
who need it most take it least.
1t is easier to suppress the first desire
than to satisfy all that follow it.
Wounds of the heart are the only
ones that are healed by opening.
What part Of speech is most distaste
full to lovers? The third person.
No man is born into the world
NTH hIro
A correspondent asks: "Do poets
ever commit suicide? We hope so.
Old age is a tyrant that forbids the
pleasures of youth on pain of death.
II isn't hard for a man to mind his
own business, but its awful tiresome.
Trifes are serious things, all our hap
piness and misery are made out of them
There is nothing so strong or safe in
an emergency of life as the simple truth.
People learn wisdom by experience.
A man never wakes up his second baby
to see it laugh.
Philadelphia girls are learning to
fiddle. Poor things It's their only
way to draw bow.
Our grand business in life is not to
see what lies dimly at safe distance,
but to do what lies clearly at hand.
Whenever we see a fashionable fe-
male Juggling round pug dog, we feel
good deal Of sympathy for the dog
A mans first care should be to avoid
the reproaches of his own heart, his
next to escape the censures of the
world.
Greek is the language for poetry,
French for love, and Italian for hand
organ melody but the man with a shirt
collar that doesn't fit is the same help
less being in all.
Why need you never starve on board
ship? Because you get cold chops
from the north, little pufs from the
south, chickens from the matches, and,
as for eggs, the captain can lay-to any
day.
Landlady-"I wish to say that there
will be dessert to-day for everybody.
Those who have paid their board bill
will get pudding for dessert. Those
who have not will please desert the
table.
81 should think you would need
military guard to keep the young men
away" said citizen to the father of
six manageable daughters. "Oh, I'm
a pretty good foot soldier myself" was
the cheerful reply.
Mooney and his wife were on their
way to church and the lady was put
ting on her gloves. "My DEAR" he
said pettishly, "you should complete
your toilet at home. I'd just as soon
see woman putting on her stocking
on the street as putting on her gloves"
''Most men would" she said, promptly,
and the abashed Colonel didn't say
another word.
Professor Gassaway was disturbed by
the ringing of his door bell. Hastily
enveloping his finger in dressing
gown, he threw open a window, and
asked what was the cause Of the dis
turbance "The burglars are bad,
and we only wanted to tell you that
one of your windows is open"
(Which one p he asked anxiously.
''The one that you have got your head
stuck out of, Professor replied the
| students in chorus
We must tell of the great specific
Hunts Kidney and Liver Remedy.
1t never fail to cure Diabetes, Bright's
| Disease &c.
A year or more ago an auctioneer
in Boston had for sale lot Of homeo.
pathic medicines. All these medicines
were dumped into one pile and dis.
posed of in one lot, there being various
kinds of medicines in the mass. A
clearinghouse keeper bought the lot,
and some days after the purchase the
auctioneer asked her; "What did you
do with that homeopathic medicine,
Mrs. -?" She replied 81 thought
| could use it, and it was cheap, and so
| crushed it under the roller and fill
ed my sugar bowls with it. The board
ers seemed to like it, and especially
when powdered over pies"
Startling Experience.
Neyt IN scarlet fever there ia no disease