The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1885-04-09
AN INVENTION WANTED.
A Chance for IA Big Fortune.

The great wants of the age, the utili-
cation of wastes, is being rapidly met by
the inventive genius of the 10Th ccntu-
ry, yet, there is an immense field, i'll
this direction, entirely uncultivatcd in-
deed the SITTER claims priority in cal
ling to it the attention of the inventive
talent of the times, and would say, by
way of parcnthesis, that whoever sue
ceeds in the direction, hereinafter sta
ted, will not only, when done with the
miserable elements of this world, be en-
abled to pitch his tent upon "Famc's e.
ternal camping ground" but leave to
his legal heirs and assigns vast boards
Of ''filthy lucre" and be one of the high
est benefactors of his race, putting to
blush former geniuses of both ancient
and modern times. This call is none
other than for the invention of a ma
chine or apparatus to take up and util-
lie an enormous waste power that is
as universal as the dominion of man. to
say nothing about woman. From the
icy parapets of Greenland to the torrid
sands Of Egypt, from the coral rcefcd
shores of India to the seal lined coasts
of Alaska, in short this force is to be
found wherever man breathes the free
air of Heaven, and is none other than
the universal and unceasing "fring off,
of the mouth.
Every precinct of life is invaded, you
feel its influence upon the highway, in
the workshop, in the office and at the
family hearth. No condition of life cs-
capes it. The Lawyer bores the Judge
and jury and, as just compensation,
is in turn often pierced through and
through, even in the wonted quietudc
of his Office. The Clergyman, by its free
use, so quietly puts you in the arms of
Morpheus, that when he stops, from
temporary exhaustion, the shock rcscnes
you from the embrace of this soothing
god and you assay to leave the blessed
sanctuary, but this universal force again
detains you until a few sisters, who
have blocked the aisle, expend a force
that could only be equaled by 40 horse
power engine. And the reverend IA
Their must take his tnrn. Perhaps it is
in the quietude of his study amid his
books and devotion that in walks pa
rishiOner who sits down for an hours
run under hundred and forty pounds
pressure. And the poor miserable Ed
itor, too, must stand the fire. Well, he
can bear it, for he has nothing to do,
unless indeed it is to decipher and cor
rect the miserable manuscripts hurled
in upon him by kind friends who want
to help him "fill up" He, poor mortal,
must endure an unceasing stream of
this all penetrating force. Whether,
attempting to steal moments time to
read and digest the latest news, or rack
ing his brains to furnish "copy," or hur-
riedly assisting in making up his mail
list he must be fired at, again and again
until he is tempted to say, if not deyout-
ly, in sober earnestness: Lord, will the
fools never die.
Now what is wanting is Moutho-
nette or a Jawena that will take up and
utilize this enormous waste force, bu-
rying old king steam in the fogs of an
tiquity. The most obtuse can but see
the great benefits to be derived there
from, not only to the inventor, by lin
ing his pockets with the shining sheck-
els, but in blessing all humanity. For
example: almost any community has
several individuals, any one of whom,
with such machine, could run si.9rt
line of railroad, and so cheaply that its
management could lower its short haul
and passenger rates and be enabled TO
double its number of ''free passes
thus charging the field of its benev-
olence and increasing its facilities for
packing caucuses. By all means let us
have Jaw-motor.