davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06
young Men. Read This.

THE voLrAIc BELT Co., of Marshall, Mich,
offer to send their celebrated ELEcrRo-VoL-
TAIc BELT and other ELECrRIc APPLIANCES
on trial for 80 days, to men (young or old
afflicted with nervous debility, loss OF vital
ity and all kindred troubles. Also for rheu-
mntism neuralgia, paralysis and many 9TH
er diseases. Complete restoration to health,
vigor, and manhood guaranteed. No risk in
Cured, as 30 days. trial is allowed. Write
them at once for illustrated pamphlet, free.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

"HELLow we aeard enc man say to an
other, the other day. 81 didn't know you
ut first, why! you look ten years younger
than you did when I saw you last"
feel ten years younger" was the reply.
:" You know l used to be under the weather
all the time and gave up expecting to be
any better. The doctor said had con-
sumption. was terribly weak, had night
sweats, cough, no appetite, and lost flesh.
/ saw DIR. Pierce's Golden Medical Discoy-
ery' advertised and thought it wsuld do no
am new man because ! am o well one."
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

Pierce's Extract of Smart. Weed, composed
of best French Brandy, Smart-Wee Ja-
maica Ginger and Camphor Water. 1t
cures cholera morbus, collie or cramps in
stomach, diarrhea, dysentery or bloody.
aux, and breaks up colds, fevers and In.
eammatory attacks.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

IT is q wonder that firemen are not al
ways taking cold, because they so FREE
quently get water in their hose.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

THE COMBINATION OF INGREDIENTS used
in making BRowN's BRONCHIAL TRocHEs
is such as to give the best possible effect
with safety. They are the best remedy in
use for Coughs and Throat Diseases.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06
ROCHESTER, n. Y, Dec. 90.

YES. son, we call that kind of hat a
stoye-pipe, because it scots or clothes
and makes such draft-on our pockets
Life.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

PIKE'sToorHAcHEDR oPs cureih minutc, &c.
Gienn's Sulphur Soap heals andsbeauttnes &c.
GERMAN CoRx RkxovER kills Cosus Bmaona
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

An artist who went into the country for
the purpose of sketching g bull found there
was danger of the bulls catching him.
Boston Times.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

IT takes pretty smart phrenologist to
tell what is in barrel by examining its
head.-N Y. Journal
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

SAFE, sure, cure. No bad effects. No
ocisons In Red Star Cough Cure.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

If afflicted with Sore Eyes, use DIR. Isaac
Thompson's Eye Water. Druggists sell it &c.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

CHARITY bawls-Th0ss at founding
asylum.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

The Mormon Church has mos mis-
sionaries than the American Board ol
Foreign Missions. - cGScueo Herald
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

JOSH BILLINGS says: 'SThe best medisin
kno for the rumatiz, is to thank the Lord
it amt the govt"
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

THE sweetest thing in walking sticks
The sugar cane.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06

"A CLOSE can"1'E:,u. the door. BIOS.
ton Hssr.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-02-06
THE POPULAR AMERICAN DCTOXARY

Contains 320oo words besides 20 pages of valuable in
formaton- The whole enriched by 40 illustrations and
handsomely bound will be sent paid amy address
upon receipt Of One Dollar. Il. d. M'KINEEY.
+. y. Box H. Burlington, Iowa
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

THE world is full of people who
stram at gnat and swallow a whole
menagerie.
Knowledge gives power; power
gives wealth; wealth bestOws about
everything desirable except good
health and an easy conscience
A PISTOL ball in motion was photo
graphed in Italy the other day, and
vet it takes a woman longer to get
ready to go somewhere than IL did
when Joseph was IN Egypt,
SUNDAY may indeed come twice a
week after awhile, as some people pre-
dict, but the time when skullduggery
and politics won't mean about the
same thing is still long ways ahead.
AT recent social gathering an Osh-
kosh woman demonstrated that she
could hold her breath two minutes.
Within three days afterward she got
ninet cen proposals of marriage and an
offer from dime museum.
A SCIENTIST estimates that there are
one hundred and twenty-eight thOus-
and hairs on a mans head. We take
it for granted the estimate is based on
the supposition that the man is unmar-
ried, though the paper doesn't say so.
THE same man who spits out words
that burn if he has to hold the baby
two minutes while its weary and
heart-sick mother steps out to get a
taste of sunshine, will stand all day in
the water up to his knees, and hold a
fish-pole without a murmur, because
one is fun and the other duty.
A MAGAZINE writer tries to put sky
light in the mystery shrouding the char
acter of Hamlet by claiming that he
was woman. But instead of letting
in daylight as intended, this only
thickens the gloom, for woman and
mystery mean about the same thing
in every known language, II we have
not been misinformed.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

once ia wonderful-it enables n man.
after n while 10 come off VICTORIOUS,
but at first il stands-or rather falls, /"
he added IN n whisner ,in sore disad.
VANTAGE About fen moro lessons. I
think will finish the gentleman Paw
me what Won owe and we'll pepin the
third course"
BiIl maid him and took I'M tho finish.
inr touches of his DECREE He noticed
,b9t tho noso on tho sand .boo was moi
ouite nrominont cnough and with i'm
nroved artistic skill he drew a nicture
that could. not fail to renresent his
cnnmv Other tirod man wont IN he'd
hut hin nersistcnt man fought thc
bog unti tho rooster shook himself
and declared that davliCht had come.
TbinkinT that be VAS undoubtedlv
canablo IF yanonish,ng Dan Rill sent
him n challangc Dan roniied as fol.
lows.
81 am Glad that Won opnoint onothor
dov of strife NOTHING Giyes mo more
pleasure than to whin y fricnd have
givcn Won several onnortunities still,
Won have NOT married NV mother
Wbv should von dcIov a morriare
that promises snch b,n1incssp / hod
olwovs thought that a Iovor was ard
cnt but 7 must cav that vour loxitv
mr. rather vour wcak ness has ostonisL,
ed ma Whv don't Won 90 owov
somewhere and submit vonrsclf to
sevcro training JfIwantsd woman
I would hc wiilipg ia tirbt for bcr y
R,ll snortcd wLen he read tbo notc
He rushed into his room made the nose
! nm tho s,ndb,g mora nron,innnt and
manlcd tho thinc in n friCbiful manner
JJc was so snccessful thot n huovont
honc swcllcJ witbln him
Tbe day for the battle was appoint-
cJ Tbc ncws had snreoJ and pconIc
from adjoining counties assembled.
Thc LanJ lad hocn moteriaIIy
imnrovcd A drum made Of two
sheen skins and n nail ke~ 5 boJ
been added. Additional benches were
nroviJcJ
Everybody was in a high state of ox-
citcmc1t Gcain vounr women smiled
nm Dan ATnin he was surc of suc.
cess. Bill was dressed in flax breaches
and a hunting shirt Dan was an.
proprlatcly clad in n yellow muslin
,hirt and hcmp oycralis Tho band
gaye n crand burst: women clappcd
lhcir hands and tho combntonts took
their nIaces, The copering was beau.
|lifnl Bil knocked Dan down. The
Lofender of his mothcr's widnwbooI
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25
iIoMEgok,

L.
The blue sky stretches far and wide,
No cloud presagcs gloom,
The pieb,ld prairie in It's pride
Where herbage lie abloom.
All, mel All; me a rock, rill,
A sky which mountains bar,
A tumbllng stream, rugged hill,
Were faircr vision far.
II.
The mountains rise, their mist aglowx
The strcamlcts sing aud leap;
The vines blow purple row on'row;
Rock sheltered yiolcts peep,
All, lonely soar the upland pines;
The valley smiles in chains;
While up the hills climb weary ylneS
Ills home upon the plains.
III.
Salt tears Of longing and regret
Sink, deep within the loan
OF foreign sell where feet are set
When hearts are left at home.
A kindlier fate Is that which lets
The hcavcn-wingcd spirit free,
Than, held in space where distance fref,
An cXlled soul to he.
Mary Barker UOdgc, in The Current.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

IT is difficult to imagine how Victor
Hugo wrote so much, considering the
way he is said to have laborod. 1t is
said that he always worked in the
mornings; that he wrote standing with
quill pen on largc-sized BLUSH
papo that after slowly and carefully
coming to a period he would read the
sentence over, and Immediately pro-
coed to alter it and tinker at it until
he had hammered 1t into the desired
shape, after which hc would commence
a new sentence, which was predestincd
to undergo the same process. In other
words, he rough-hewed his idea at first,
then planned, sandpapered, and var
nished it before he chopped out an
other one. HIS manuscript presented
a singular appearance. 1t was q sort
of battlefield on paper, in which the
killed words were well stamped out
and the new recruits pushed forward
in anything but good order. 1t has
also been compared to sheet OF
music, in which the blots looked like
crotchets and quavers But, one way
or another, Hugo managed to gci
along.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

WASHINGTON society people at first
objected to Miss ClcYcland's style of
wearing her hair, which is short, but
they are now reconcilcd to it, says a
correspondent, because they have
discovered that she resembles Rosa
ROnhcur.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

THE tycoon who was disposed in ia.
vor of the present mikado of Japan by
revolution which cost one hundred
thousand lives is living quietly in
Sidsuoka, n small Japanese country
town. BE is 50 years old and COM
paratively poor.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

WHEN Secretary Bayard visited
Kansas City he had himself weighed
on the scales at Armour's packing
house, and tipped tho beam at 202
pounds. Senator Vest and Cockrell
weighed l72 and 2O9! pounds respect
iyely.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

Mrs. j. ELLEN FOSTER, of Iowa, n
lady still! young and of ATTRACTIVE pres
ence, is among the delegates of the
national conference of charities and
corrections. She is the head of the
law firm of Foster ~ Foster, of
Dubuque, the ~ Foster being her
husband
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

The first thing that strikes the be-
holder about Sir Henry Ponsonby is
his red nose. One can not help feel
ing that, on man so high as the pri-
vate secretary of the queen OF Great
Britain and empress of India, Il red
nose is singularly out Of place. The
rest of his countcnancc is in keeping
with his nose, The queen is fully
aware of the undignihcd appearance
Of her right hand man, and would
gladly replace him by younger sccre-
lary, but long years Of intimacy with
every public transaction of the SOver-
eien have rendered him almost indis-
pensable.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

The duke of Argyll is considered
one of the best orators IN the English
peerape.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

Mrs. NoTTAGE, widow of the late
lord mayor of London, has received
intimation from Mr. Gladstone that
tho queen has sanctioned her assum-
ing the title belonging to the wife of a
knipht,
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

WALT WHITMAN has been invited by
Baron Tennyson to visit HIM at his
home in the Isle of Wight and in all
probability will accept the invitation.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

WHEN proposing the grant to Prin-
cess Beatrice the prime minister APP
peared in his war pnint-hlgh shirt
collar, black frock coat, white waist
coat, and gcranium in his button
hole. He seemed physically out of
condition, but with dramatic delibcr-
alton prepared himself for the occa-
sion by an audible direction to Sir
Arthur Haytcr to fetch him glass of
water. To hear was TO obey, and tho
Ganymede was back with brimming
beaker in an eighteenth part of the
time 1t took Puck to put girdle
round 10 earth. Mr.. Gladstone
gurglcd trinc of the pure element
with perfectly neutral expression OF
colnten nee, and then, fortified by a
cheer, began his speech.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

The late Mark Pattison, rector of
Lincoln, had human fondness for his
books. Nothing annoyed him so much
as to hear one OF them fall; and dust
'ng them, which he reduced to n sci
once, seemed to give him real pleasure.
In his last illness the sight of any of
his favoritcs depressed him greatly.
"Ah," he would say, 81 am to leave
my books,n and sometimes: "Thoy
have been more to me than my friends. "
lie would ask for them one after an
other, till he was literally covered al
most to his shoulders AS he lay, and
the floor around him was strewn with
them. lie used to say that the sight
of books was necessary to him at his
work; and once reading how Schiller
always kept ''rottcn apples" in his
study because their scent was benc-
fetal to him, he pointed to some
shelves above his head, whore he kept
his oldest and most priced editions,
and said "Thcrc are my rotten
apples"
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

FLORENCE MARRYAr was asked why
her heroes were always light-haired,
and replied that she was most impress.
ed by dark haired men, and rs she u.s.
ually wrote about somebody she knew,
she changed the color of their hair
as one way of covering up their
personality.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

Again Bill called upon the professor.
al don't understand 1t, SAID the lover.
~ know that / have improved, but
why cannot | conquer himP"
''Ah, my dear man." the professor
replied, "the hardest thing in this
world to overcome is strength. Sci
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

SAMUEL j. TLDEN and President
Cleveland are both subscribers TO the
fund for the erection of monument
to the memory of the poet Bryant.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

MANAGER John Stetson, it is said,
was fined So one day recently for pro-
family in the streets of Boston.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

''DEsCRIBEEn was Lord Beaconiield's
coinage for the person to whom a
thing is describod.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

A man at Lexington, Ga, has novel meth
cd OF catching NOES. lie places cows horn
in the track Of the mole, which crawls into the
horn, wedges himself in, and there awaits his
captors.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25


The time for another battle was ap-
pointed. ThecrOwd was even larger
than the crowd which first assembled.
The band, with the iditiOn of coon.
skin tamhourinc, made thrilling music.
This time Bill wore blue shirt. His
step was firm, his courage indomitable.
Dan smiled upon the young ladies and
declared that he was confident of sue.
cess. Bill, remembering the words of
the professor, felt happy. lie knew
that uncultivatcd strength could not
long stand up against science.
When time was called each man
stepped proudly into the arena. Bill
caught sight of the widows face. A
great hope swclled within him.
Bill aimed blow at Dams nose. Dan
lodged, jumped, wheeled his leg
around and knocked Bill down. Bill
scrambled to his feet and seized Dan.
Then, as they waltzed in great hurry,
the band played "Hail Jerusalem
Home" Bill fell, but unwilling to
acknowledge defeat, he squared hlm-
self and again entered the encounter.
Dan moved around with n grace that
surprised everyone. The muscles in
his arms bulged out the sleeves of his
shirt. At an auspicious time, Bill
knocked him down, but before the ad-
vantage could be seized, he sprang to
his feet and gave Bill blow that
brought to view many stars hitherto
undiscovered. The audience became
almost frantic with excitement, Lead
ing planters bet bales of cotton the re-
suit, and many dollars changed hands.
Evidently both men had greatly i'm
proved; for while Bill had improved
in science, it seemed that Dan had i'm
proved in strength.
y The result was sad. Dan, catching
a curious hold of Bill, threw him. He
struck the ground with loud sound,
rs though strong man had struck the
bare earth with board. Bill strug-
gled frantically, but was forced TO
acknowledge that he was beaten.
"Bill," said the widow, when the
noisy crowd had dispersed, don't give
up yet, for you know that love you" ="
II will never give up. The dying
sun Of future ages will find me fight
ing for the woman / love"
"Dan's strength is remarkable, but
1 think that you must eventually wear
him out.
az shall continue. sweet widow
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

Bismarck's income is 90 an hour, or 100
BEERS Chicago Sun,
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25
RANDOM CLIPPINGS.

HENRY NJ. STANLEY, the explorer,
is, in religion, dcvout Baptist.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25

Hear what Gail Hamilton says about
good manners: "What shall be the
education of young womanP First,
good manners. And last and all the
way between, good manners. Read
ing and writing are often convenient,
often obnoxious, never indispensable.
Good manners imply every saving
grace known under heaven among
men and women. Good manners are
the absolutely transparent medium of
conveying to the world the benevolence
of a good heart; music is matter OF
throat and ears; painting is a matter
of eyes and fingers; dancing is a feat
of feet; and housekeeping is question
of the will. Good manners involve
and include every department Of the
human being, body, soul and spirit,
heart and mind, imagination and con-
science, discrimination and moral
judgment. The whole duty Of man
to man-is embraced in good manners,
and II bad manners were admitted into
heaven it would cease to be heaven
Youths Companion.
Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-25
A Rnrll lady.

Ladies real ladies are never COM
PEELED to mako public announce.
ment of the fact that they are ladies,
The woman in the following incident
showed by her slang, if in no other
way, that she had no claim to the title;
"You must behave yourself,
madam" said n western Judge to q
wrathful witness.
well, make him behave hisself,
then, ~ she replied, pointing toward Il
young lawyer who was cross-question-
ing her in manner that was really
very exaspcratlng.
"Simply answer his questions, " said
the Judge, looking severely at the at
torney. at he is not gentleman, it
does not follow that you should not be
a lady"
"Me lady!" cried the lrate witness.
"Me lady! i.ookce here, Judge, l
was born a lady, and raised lady,
and don't you tergH H!'
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1885-02-21
ADVICE TO MOTHERS.

Are you disturbed at night and broken
Of your rest by sick child suffering and
crying with pain Of cutting teeth2 If SO.
send at once and get a bottle of Mrs
WINSTON Soothing Syrup for children
tccthing It's vahe is iucaIculable.
1t will relieve The poor lille sufferer i'm
medjately Depend upon il mothers.
there is no mistake about it. Il cures
dyseatcIy, diarrhocM regulates tie stom-
ach and bowels, cares wind collie, soft
ems the gums, reduces Inflammation aud
gives tone and energy to the whole sys-
TEN. Mrs. Winslows Soothing Syrup
for Children Tecthing IS pleasant to the
taste, and is the prescription of one Of
the Oldest AMI bcsy female nurses and ply
sicians in lie United States, and is foI
sale by aj druggists throughout tie
world. Price % cents per bottle
fcL-2S m-w-s m "
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1885-02-21

SrHINaFmLn, MS, Feb. 2I.-Tle iegjsia
ture, IN joint session, Friday took three more
ballots for United States senator. The first
resulted: Logan, 100; Morrison, 95; Hsines,
>; Ward .; LAWYER, l; Hoxie, !; Washburne,
{; Shuman, /.
The next ballot stood: Logan, 100; Nor
ris1l. 81; Haiues, ?; Washburue, l; Shaman,
/ Ward, :; Hoxie, l.
T. the next ballot Logan get 10l, AM
Morrison IS. HaineS got votes, WashbuIu.
J. ana Ward, :. Mcb1uIlen, who had been
yo&Gs for Shuman voted for Logan, and
O Shea changed from Hoxio to Morrison
The senate passed q joint resolution asking
congress to place Gen Grant or the retired
llst. but tho house refused to suspend the
rules an adopt the same
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1885-02-21

NEW EgEK, Fob, 2l.-At 2:2) o'clock Fri
day morning flames vera dis covered in the
rear Of the second floor il the central por-
rion Of Aarvia's safe factory, on Wet
Thirty -segeutb street, between Eighth aud
Ninthayenuca, There are'three huge elevator
shafts in the front building, and through
them the flames spread with light
ming rapbuty In less than hati
al hour the whole building wa.
aliaza. Tho occupants Of the tenement
houses adjoining the building wore rousol
lrom sleep and forced to vacato their homes.
At $3.50 o'clock several hundred Of the uias-
s.ve safes fell through tine upper floor with q
Tremendous crash, carrying down She other
floor, Then ths front and back walls fel
10. TIC buidJng was completely destroyed
Tie i3.= on stock is $1,000, OF nsechIa merry
s73.bj9 ana Dn taa uilling Sl25 90. Two
Laairsi and fifty men lose cmp.3. ment
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1885-02-21
niaine and His porirait

EosToN, Feb. GA Washington special
TO The Herald says: About & year ago MIR.
Healy, Boston artist, painted portrait Of
James 6. Blaine to be hung with those OF
his predecessors in the diplomatic reception
rooS in the state department The
picture was not satisfactory, and
Mr. Blaine sat- again A second
time he expressed dissatisfaction when tho
services of tie Engh.h portrait painter, Mr.
Archer, were engaged. His work was gan
orally commended, bat Mr. Blaine IN
timatet that he was no better pleased with
this third production than with the
work of Mr.. Healy The state de-
partment adires> sci Mir. Blaine several
times, asking Whether they should accept
or reject the Archer painting For some
reason Mr. Blaine did not reply. Secretary
Frelmghuysel at last grew tired Ct wait
ing, and accordingly purchased the Archer
painting for $500. Mr., Blaine IS now very
angry, AMI claims that Mr. Fralnghuysen'.
action wa, the result OF spite
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1885-02-21

PHILADELPHIA, Fen. 2l.-The American
Iron AM Steel association has received 70
turas Of the Ressemsr steel production in
The United States last year. The total
quantity of ingots converted were LBS.
SO aag tons As compared with th.
production in 1855 there wa q fab
iHS oil If 7 Pcr cent Ths maximum pro
luet.1a o. Bt'seucr steel iHgots was eeaele4
IN 1872, when C2G,45 tons wa converted.
TIE G-Ire5 for 1854 show q reduction OF .ut
g For cent. from the maximum The qaaa
j!ty produced by the different sections Of tn
country is as follow; Pennsylvania, !, ~
pa net tons; Illinois, S3y, 0GS: other STAKES,
7j,o4a. Tne details of rail production for
the year are: Bessemer steel, 1,116,0H ton-:
iron 2l.S3J tons; open-hearth steel, 5000
tons