Martinsburg independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1875-1900, 1885-03-14
The Martinsburg Lime kiln
Climb.
REPORTED BY MEoTNNIs HAMsTRING.

Brother Bighead raped on the table
with his old corn-cob pipe. As soon
as silence was obtained the chairman
said: Use glad to see such a varied
crowd heah dis ebening. Dis am de
first lectur' you's had dis winter. l
expoint Peter Henroost, Isaac Wal
pole and Bill Catface committee to
escort Hon. Sir Isaac Newton Pota-
tobug from de cloke room to de os-
trum.
The committee in a body proceed
ed with stately tread to the cloak
room, and with one at each side and
the other in front of him, the great
scholar assembled the two foot plat
form After shaking his hand, Bro.
Bighead said:
II now hab de pleasur' of introdu-
Gin to de gang Hon. s. /. N Potato.
bug, reformed chicken thief and to-
bacco chewer. De boys in de gal
Fry will please turn dem putty blow
ers terward de rear oh de buildin' "
The orator came forward:
Sisters an Bruthers l shall lee-
tur' dis ebening upon de exmiliar
subject-'chickens. III der am any
firing in de world dat q culled person
likes, it am chicken! CA smacking
of lips What chile can fail to rel
ish dis insect2 From myinfancy Use
been trained in de Tub of chicken.
But when I was small, my parents
ware poor, and dc nearest chicken
roost, in de next yard. Oft on a
Silly night, when de clouds ware
black, Use had a yearnin to get in
secty--to lay hole on de neck OF
chicken. Dis yearnin' came often
Expectation. "A big man, wild q
long coat, called at our doar one
mornin', to see if der ware any stray
chickens aroun'. painful suspense.)
/ said, der am none But, he went
to sarchin' and when he left, one OBJ
his hands held TO- chickens, and de
other had dis niggah by de collar.
He marched me down befo little
man, wild stick benin his eer, who
made me break stones for six months.
(Groans.) Use been wicked man;
Use stole coal, lied, cussed and had
two wives. (Men frown and women
SMILEY But Use turned ober now.
Use got my face toward de place
whar POLICEMEN doan catch yer by de
collar, nor de little man make you
break stones on de street yea, whar
hen roosts am no more, but whar you
just lay back an eat milk an drink
honey. (Titters.) Use gwine to be
an angle--to hab harp wild thous-
and strings. Just frink oh dat place.
1t nebsr gets cold, flies unknown, no
wurk, no growth, no dogs and cats.
Dis am no foolin' de gate am open
my name am on de bills, Use clumb-
in de golden stairs. Once l lubed
de world wild its watermel'ns, chick
ems and whisk-women now, as Mr..
Iscariot Judiam says,
81 would not lib always, ask not TO stay,
So glib me big chicken, an carry me away.
(Here q spit ball hit the orator in his
eye.) Look heah, boy, I'll frow my
ole shoe at you, if You does dat agin.
Yes, my heahers, Use ridin' in de
chariot OBJ Isaiah, and de faces OBJ
my fou'teen dead chilen beam from
de starry fields abov' When dis ole
heart ceases to actuate, when dis soul
of mine shall flee like chicken to it's
maker de happiness Tbe saught will
be found an dis ole head sleep in do
bosom of Father Abraham" takes
a seat-audience weeps.)
Brother Bighead arises
"You hab been treated to fine
lectur' dis night. Dose meltin' tears
probe it. De lecturer am workin' in
q good cause-a poah widow and an
orphan chile am in need OBJ help-his
muther am de widow and he am de
orphan chile. So you shell out de
oanniaa Euowd dia man einca ba