The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1885-06-04
COMING TO TOWN.
Arp Pays His Old FrIends nsVis,t

Nan i'c III tue country until lie
gets clear behind the age, and when he
goes to big city like Atlanta or New
YORK, he don't know how to behave him.
self with becoming dignity. There are
ne" ioiks and new ways and new methods.
I visited Atlanta the other day for the
hrst time in months, and am afraid I
never will catch up. inquired for e
friend and was told he was on the fifth
moor of the Fitten building. So went
thefe and climbed up all the stairs, and
my knees were weak AMI sbaky by the
time got to his room, and was 30 tired
L could hardly say "howdy," and he
asked nae why didn't take the elevator.
Wen, G:dent know there was one nor
now to find it. So when got through
my business he showed me the thing. but
1t all look'd 80 curious went back the
way came up aud was thankfui. Then
L went over to the Constitution Office to
give Joe Harris a pair of rabbit ears,
lexas rabbit ears, and asked where
would find Joe. and Mr.. Hemphill cut
bis words of short, as he said "fourth
floor, elevator" So poked around in
the hall and was about to give it up
when l saw the thing coming down with
man in it, and as he got out had sense
enough to get in, and just then the house
commenced going down, down, down
until It struck bottom, and was let out
and commenced hunting around for Har.
rrls. Hound him hid away up there, and
he poked out his off:hand and said
"howdy," and kept his seat like he was
glued to it. | think he is fastened 70 it
somehow, and / have since heard it was
the rule Of the company that no editor is
to give up his seat under any pretext, for
II they gave it up to every caller they
would never have time to write anything,
and SO the paper wouldn't como out In
the morning. There Was but one chair
in the room, and Harris was fastened to
that. p! told him was awful tired, and
ne motioned me to n seat on the waste
basket. A basket is the good thing to
sit in or set in, but it is the poorest thing
to sit on l ever tried. l endeayored to
enjoy it for about two minutes and then
l retired in good order, which, of course
was what was expected. Next visited
Grady's room and he, too, was glued to q
chair. How they get loose when they 20
to dinner I don't know, but I think those
chairs have patent fixing underneath,
and when dinner time comes, then Evan
Howell, the president, touches q wire and
that loosens up the boys all over the
house. Evan keeps lot of chairs in
his room for he IL the entertainer and is
expected to keep up the social relations.
He goes up on the elevator but always
slides down Oh the stair railing for exer-
else. Everything seems to be reduced to
Il system about that building.
Nayf Vvopfo1 81 ,ao - -.
other side of town, and when inquired
where could find him they told me to
use the telephone, aud pointed it out. 1
slipped up cautiously on the thing and
was about to whisper in The little trumpet
fixing when likely lad laughed at me,
and told me to put that to my ear and to
talk through the keyhole, Well, I gave
it up in despair aud asked him to talk
for me, which he did very politely, and
never charged me cent. Well, it saved
me long walk in the rain, and my time
was precious, and so hurried down to
bank to get little ten dollar check
cashed and the bank man was young and
pretty and dident know me, and said I
would have 10 be identified. saw two
or three more handsome young uns in
there, and looked straight at them all
but they made no sign, aud so went to
another bank, and poked the check
through little hole with a glass shelf,
and the young man looked at it and
motioned me to git further. So went
to the next hole, and another young man
looked ut it and motioned me to 20
around the corner. So I tried the next
one, and he motioned me further on, and
30 kept going until had tried them all
and got to the last one. He was Young
and pretty too, just like all the others,
and ho looked at the check on both sides,
and then looked at me and handed }the
paper back, and said: "Don't know
you. You must get somebody to identify
you." With humility and eadness I
started out in tha rain to find some old
man, DR.. Joe Thompson, or Judge Ezzard
or Uncle Jack Neai-some of nv sort OF
folks-.some patriarch of age and infirm.
ity, who has not forgotten the friends OF
his youth, and as l was about to make
my exit heard familiar voice calling
me by name, and he said: "Major,
major, come back here, i know you" and
80 found friend and got my money
but il all reminded me of q fact, solemn
fact, and that Is, the young men are run.
ming the machine now, and we old folks
are passing away. '.'A aa 1,
Then I went TO one of Atlanta's great
big stores 20 get Mira. Arp some shoes
number 2 shoes. Mrs. Arp used to wear
one snd half, but she has got more
common sense now and wears two's, and
while I was waiting 10 be waited on b
fellow kept looking at me pretty hard
ana every time looked around he was
watching me. So l concluded no was
the detective that was kept in that store
and l stood farther back from the coun!
ter. Pretty soon q friend cam. up and
recognized me and then the detective
went off about his business. I bought q
beautiful pair Of kid gloves and shoes foI
five dollars, for You see Mrs. Apps birth.
day is close at hand and If / could have
found anything nicer in the way of shoes
I would have bought them. The clerk
showed me come slippers and said they
were selling them at five cents pair.
thought he was joking and told him Ia
put me up q thousand pair and he backed
right down and said they: didn't have
that MANY. Well I bought one pair
anyhow and that shows how little I think
of myself. Five dollars for shoes fol
Mrs. Arp and FIVE cents for shoes for me-
Well, tsat is just about the difference
for she "a o hundred times moro desefv.
ing than I am.
/ Well, Ia due time left che great. city
and have come home, where there are nc
elevators nor telephones nor ironclad
hanks. Where I can sit in my piazza
and rest my weary feet upon my banisteri
and holler howdy TO the nabors as they
IL =