The Mankato free press. [volume] (Mankato, Blue Earth County, Minn.) 1879-1924, 1885-11-27
SATAN BAFFLED.
A Texas Sketch With q Word for Other
Localities.

From Texas Siftings.
Macbeth Simmons, q farmer living
or Onion Creek, near Austin. Texas,
went over to see Jim Best, whcsetarm
adjoins that of Simmons.
This year the crops have been ex-
traordinarily fine on Onion Creek. The
corn will average forty bushels to the
be desired, but Macbeth Simmons is q
chronic growler. He is never satisfied
with the weather, or the crops, or
even with himself. In fact, the better
the crops the more hegrumbles.
Jim Best, on the other hand, is O
cheerful, contented sort of aman, who
never grumbled about anything. If he
could not avert O calamity he never
grumbled, because it was of no use to
grumble. He never grumbled about
those misfortunes he could prevent,
because it was better to do SO than to
grumble about them, so he never
grumbled.
"Good morning, Simmons" said
Best, cheerfully, "Take a chair in the
shade, and we'll cut O watermelon
after q while"
Simmons answered the salutation
in q despairing sort of q way, and
having taken achair, began to grumble
about the low price corn was bringing,
then he objected to the kind ofweather
that was going to prevail during the
coming week.
"Look here, Simmons" said Best,
81 don't believe you are ever satisfied.
l don't think it is possible to make
you quit g%rumbling. BY the way, I
had u dream about you last night"
'"That means that / am going to die
of some horrible lingering disease"
F! said Macbeth, looking as if he wasdead
already.
81 dreamt," continued Best, "that
Satan had been listening to your
grumbling for q long time and had at
last come to the conclusion to try and
see if he he could make you stop it by
giving you everythingyou wanted. So
n day while you were blowing in the
field, and cussing the climate, the soil,
the pillow, the mule and everything in
sight, he put in an appearance right by
your side"
elbow did helook?" asked Simmons.
Gle looked as if he were very much
of q gentleman. He peculiarly
shaped boots, he kept his hat on his
head, so you couldn't see his horns,
and his tail was curled up somewhere
inside of his clothes. He looked like
a poker-playing member of the Texas
Legislature. He had two little
o,,.l ,r.&l liz, . Io,,1rf,J,yo w,
very politely and asked you how you
were coming on with your blowing,
and you growled, and said it was
the worst ground to pillow in western
Texas"
"And so it lis" said Simmons, gloom
lily.
"Well," continued Best, "Satan
smiled @ peculiar sort of q smile, and
said he would try and see what he
could do. He took hold. of the pillow,
and in almost no time he had the
whole field plowed up. Every furrow
was as straight rs an arrow. When
Satan had plowed up the field, you
grumbled because youdidn't have seed
enough, but Satan only smiled, and
said he would attend to that too, and
he VENT to work and planted the entire
field"
"Nothing of that sort ever happens
to me. never have the luck to have
anybody help me put in q crop"
growled Simmons.
CATER Satan had plowed up your
field and planted your corn for you,"
continued Best, she asked if you were
satisfied, and you replied that there
900 of ,lo,t;n, o,,bou, ~,
| there would be either too much rain,
or too much sunshine, and there
conldn't be any cornraised that year."
CHATS just the way it is in Texas"
said Simmons.
"Satan neverdoes things by halves"
continued Best, $50 he brought out
the two round boxes and said hat one
of them was full of sunshine and the
other was full of rain, and they were
properly labelled so you could not
make any mistake. You could
just regulate the weather to suit
yourself, and that he would come
back when the corn a ripe to getthe
empty boxes. Mr.. Satan then wey
away. The crops were splendid t.
year, and yours in particular, but
grumbled as usual. You said
would be too cheap, and just t. .
Satan appeared and having ,or
to your complaints, he toe j;sta
the ears of corn and strip IL go
shuck called your attentj. inc oT
that your corn was difff On TO baf
or corn, as all the grap rent from =
were of solid, pure s 10 Of vonr =,
thousnt you would .,old. Mr.. Sat
where ne was Q .lyhow, but thel
corners o! your led, pulled
III winnings mouth down and sa
"When Ic' ort of q wav:-
at the PAM Jme to get the greenba,
died at ie' for the gold I'll be sw
linen lst two per cent"
That 2 Mr.. Satan got mad and s,
enoug IS this world was not %
cha' IN for you he would give yo,
~ age to the place where he lived, a
y last l saw he was going off wi
GU under his arm, and / smelt
strong smell of sulphur and the,
woke up, trembling all over, for I W
l. afraid something had happenedtoy VIC
at lam gladto see you are still here in il
of as, and well enough to grumble abo
e h corn crop" concluded Best.
rs eyes" replied Simmons, getting
to go away, 1--WE got cold str.
IN running up my legs, and that no.
IS am going to have dumb chilli co
long," h,