The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1885-05-30
Pm nishiu " an In1nnsInI. Il.


Furnishing an Impostor.
When Grant, in August, SCI, was
sent with brigade to southern Mis-
souri, to repel a Threatened invasion
of it by JEFF Thompson, an incident
occurred which is thus described by
one of his staff officers. 1.-The distance
from the starting point of the expedi-
tlOn to the supposed rendezvous Of
the cOnfederates was about 40 miles,
and the greater portion OF the route
lay through the bowling Wilderness
The imaginary suffering that our sol
diers endured during the first two days
of their march was enormous. 1t was
impossible to steal or 'confscate' un-
cultivated real estate, and not a hog
or a chicken or an ear of corn was
anywhere to be seen. On the third
day, however, affairs looked more
hopeful, for a few small specks of
ground in a state of partial cultiva-
ton were here and there visible. On
that day Lieut. Wlckfield, of an Indi-
ana cavalry regiment, commanded
the advance guard, consisting OF eight
mounted men. About noon he
came up to a small farmhouse, from
the outward appearance of which he
Judged there might be something fit to
eat inside. He halted his command,
dismounted, and. with two lieuten-
ants, entered the dwelling. He knew
that Grants incipient fame had al
ready gone out through all that cOun-
try, and it seemed to him by repre-
senting himself to be Gen Grant he
might obtain the best the house al
fOrded. So, assuming a very impera-
tive demeanOr, he accOsted the in
mates of the house and told them that
he must have something for himself
and staff to eat. They desired to
know who he was, and he told them
that he was Brighten. Grant. At the
sound Of the name they all flew around
with alarming alacrity, and served up
about all they had in the house, tax
Ing great pains all the while to make
loud professions OF loyalty. The lieu
tenants ate as much as they could Of
the not oversumptuous meal, but
which was, nevertheless, good for that
country, and demanded what was to
pay. Nothing And they went on
their way rejoicing. In the meantime
Gen. Grant, who had halted his army
few miles farther back for a brief
resting-spell, came in sight of and was
rather impressed with the appearance
OF this same house. Riding up to
the fence in front of the door,
he desired to know if they
would cook him a meal. No said a
female, in a grutf voice: Gen Grant
and his staff have Just been here and
eaten everything in the house except
q apumpkin pie 'Humph, muttered
Grant; what Is your name? Sci
vidge, replied she. Casting a half-dol-
lar in at the door he asked if she would
keep that pie until he sent an officer
for it, to which she replied that she
would. That evening, after the camp
ing ground had been selected, the vari-
Gus regiments were notified that there
would be a grand parade at $50 for
orders. Officers would see that all
their men turned out, etc. In five
minutes the camp was in a perfect up
roar, and filled with all sorts of
rumOrs. Some thought the enemy
were upon them, it being so unusual to
have parades when on a march. At
$50 the parade was formed ten
columns deep and nearly a quarter OF
a mile in length. Both officers and
men were amazed at this unusual
parade after a long and weary march,
and wondered what it pOrtended, when
the assistant adjutant general rode
in front of the lines, and in a grave,
loud and clear voice read the following
order:
"HEADQUARTERs ARMY IN THE Field
Special Order No. -: Lieut.. Wickfeld, Of
the Indiana cavalry, having on this day
eaten everything in Mrs. Selvidge's house,
at the crossing OF the Trenton and Poca-
hontas and Black River and Cape GradcaU
roads, except one pumpkinp pie, Lieut. Wick
field is hereby ordered to return with an cs-
cort OF one hundred cavalry and eat that
pie also. ~. :. GRANT,
"Brigadier General Commanding.
at is impossible to describe the ef-
feet the reading OF this order had on
the troops, Everyone was expecting to
hear some mOmentOus announcement,
and hence listened with eager atten-
ton, and when it was finished looked
at each other in utter bewilderment,
and asked, what did 1t mean? The
parade was over, and the moment
they dispersed each one sought an eX-
PLANTATION for the strange affair ii
soon leaked out, and by the time the
crestfallen lieutenant was ready with
his escort to leave camp 1t was IN a
perfect roar, and the peals of laughter
followed him : he defiled along the
road on his way back to eat that pie.
Grant made no explanation ofhis con
duct, followed it by no reprImand.
The order carried its own lesson, ad-
ministered its own rebuke, sul each
one knew that it would no. ne safe
business to pass himself off for thegen-
eral-in-Chief. much less forage IN his
name for his own benefit. When the
lieutenant returned to camp, late in
the evening, he was glad to escape to
his tent to avoid the numberless ques-
tions and Jokes about the pumpkin
pie"
TAKE one" said a philanthropic
looking man to a youth on a Fulton
ferry boat as he rendered him a ticket
on which was printed, 'HO every one
that thirsteth." Thanks, awfully,
but don t drink, returned the youth.
''Why, this is a scriptural sentence
that you should ponder over, young
man." said the patriarch in an ag-
grieved tone. rs that so? Well /
thought it was a ticket for beer, re
torted the worldly minded youth.
ABOUT six miles below New Orleans,
writes joaquin Miller to the New York
Independent, you see, from the deck OF
your steamer, a monument to the
sportive instincts OF our naval officers
as they neared the city, which nature
and time have not yet overthrOwn or
cor-erad vr-i+b ap1- kipdlv mantle 4