The Indiana State sentinel., 1885-08-05
WIT AND PLEASANTLY.

A Philadelphia poetess exclaims: sob,
kiss me once and let me diel If she is kiss
ed by the right man and in the. right man
Eer, she will want TO live forever.
A South Side seamstress earelessly left
needle in the back of young-lady custom
er's dress. and now particular friend Of the
family has his arm done up in arnica.
Il don't believe in church seats being free"
saId Deacon Ames. And why not:' in
quired the parsOn Because they make
people good, for nothing" Boston Tran
script.
1t is said that 13 per cent. more corsets are
sold in winter than in summer. The long
winter evening, with the gas turned down to
appease the meter, are hard on corsets.-Bur-
hngton Free Press.
1t is hard to get up a reunion of old classes
at Nassar College. They recently tried to get
up reunion of the class of so, but nobody
came. All the good old 80 girls claim to
have been graduated in '79-Puck.
The entire business portion of a Western
town was re- orted as destroyed by fire. and
when cha association made inquiry, 70
render some assistance, it was discovered
that a solitary saloon had been swept away
You say: when kissed ou you are ure mus
quite
Have forgotten mvSelf. Sol did: y0u are right.
No. I'm not such an egOtst, dear, il is true
AS to think OF myself when I'm looking at you
Exchange.
A mosquito il mans ear is not a pleas
ant thing TO experience, but il is better than
golden hair tangled in the top button of the
coat which her husband wore to lodge last
night.
A soft answer. whenever ! can find
donkey with a loud enough voice and long
enough ears he growled, 'Ill bring him
up here and let him argue with you"
"Weil, my dear" she replied sweetly, "what
subject do you want TO discuss?''
Pat whats his other name?) is back in
town again. He is still preaching and says
he has been on his road to heaven for forty
years. We are inclined to think he has loi
cred on the road. to have reached point no
nearer Heaven than Martinsville after forty
years travel.
''Will you kindly tell me what is going on
in that chureh?' asked tramp of gentle
man who had just descended the steps
They are holding church fair. am
very sorry."-'Why so, my friend?'-
'Nell, was going TO ask you to help me-
but if you've been in there it amt no use"
Applicant to landlady-"I am willing to
pay good price, madame, but 1 am very
particular about nay food. am under a doe
tar's care constantly, and suffer dreadfully
with dyspepsia" Landlady-"Oh, am sure
you viii be pleased with my table if that is
the case, sir. Ny boarders all have dyspep-
sia"
Two ITishmen were walking along one of
the main thOroughfares in Glasgow, when
they noticed large placard in the window
OF the shop with the words, "Butteri But
ter, Butterilr' in giant type, printed on
il Pat" said Mick, what is the meaning
Of them big strokes after the wordsr' ''Ohl
We ignoramus," says Pat -'shure they're
meant for shillelahs TO show its Irish but
ter"
Soon q er the late General Fitzpatrick was
r-farf u Tefa rf.f 10
an old lady who had known him from child
hood, and to whom the gallant generals
large way of stating things had sometimes
seemed like exaggeratIOn. We'll, Jud, she
said, Il hear You have been called TO the
ministry. Glad to hear it. You'll make a
real good preacher; but, [solemnlY] Jud, you
must stop your lying"
a good story told of an old settler who
had never killed Oeer, but was fortunate
enough to entTap one in a snare. Now
said he to his wife, ''Pll have to say that I
killed one deer" So he tied rope about
the animals horns and fastened it to a tree
Carefully loading his big-bOred rife, he
stepped off few PAGES and aimed delibera-
tely at the bucks head. Bang went the
gun, the dust few from the rope, and the
deer bounded of, free and unfettered, to en-
JOY the pleasures of his haunts in the green
wood The bullet had cut the rope in
twain.
The commercial traveller of a Philadelphia
house, while in Tennessee, approached a
stranger as the train was about to start and
said: Are you going on this trainr II
am" Have you any baggage?' No"
well, nv friend, you can do me favor, and
it wont cost you anything, You see, I've
two big trunks, and they always make me
pay extra for one of them. You can get
one cheeke' on your ticket, and we'll euchre
them. See ''Yes, / see, but / haven't
any ticket" But thought you said you
were going on this train % SO 1 am; Pm
the conductor" "Ohl" He paid extra as
usual.-The Independent.
They stood beneath the summer skies and
watched the twinkling stars in ceaseIess
brilliant twink. 1t was a night to bring the
angels from the blue that they might lay
their gentle hands upon the evening air, and,
touching every heart string fill the worl
with harmony. And this Is love- she said.
looking into his face And love is religion
he continued, STOPPING to kiss the pretty
pinkness of her cheek. What religion? she
asked, naively, Presbyterian, or Methodist,
or Baptist, OF Episcopalian?' None of these,
angel mine, he whispered folding her to his
throbbing heart; none of these; il is YOU
an'-I-farian.' Devotional exercises were
continued until late our."-Merchant
Traveller