davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
THE OIL OF REEoRM.

They have struck oil around on f street
Tis but a tiny stream, blue and yellow,
with the shadows of neighboring grocery
store, but It's greasy enough for all prac
tical purposes, and must hereafter be re-
gardcd as potent factor in the develop
ment of Washington.
How this oil came here is one of natures
mysteries, but there is a strong conviction
that its discovery is one of the results of Il
change of administration. If the wheels
of reform had not gone creaking and
croaking through the streets of Washing
ton there would never have been neces-
sity for a local oil well wherewith 10
lubricate the ancient vehicle. And if
President Cleveland had not come into
power, the reform wagon would to-day be
standing in the back woodward, q monu-
ment to the decay of grease and the su-
premacy of soap"
II is with pleasure, therefore, we echo
the general acknowledgment that the
new oil wells on + street are the direct re-
suit of having new administration. fl
it should hanspire that a colored boy,
hunying along in the night, stubbed his
toe at the corner and lost his oil can in the
darkness, it would still be proyidential
that the Jeilersonian simplicity of the
Democratic party revived the use of kero
scne and thereby developed the lost coaj
oil can on + street.
I'm either event you 90 out at the same
hole you went in--iust as the coal oil did
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
BETWEEN TWO FIRES.

-Four weeks ago the Democrats were
quietly intimating that Postmaster-Gcn-
cral Villas had committed himself too Sc
yerely to the civil-service law They
even said that his -you-evcr-in-
dicted" circular was an insult to the party
and an extra-iudicial amendment to the
Pendleton bill which was calculated to
make the Mugwumps fall on his neck in
rapturous Endorsement.
Four weeks ago they said that Postmas-
ter-General Villas ratified around in a Cab
met Office like pumpkin seed in gourd,
because he did not accomplish at once the
task of three men by throwing down the
bars and turning the Democratic party
by droves into the clover field of the
postoffices. They even commented on his
personal bearing, and shook their heads
sadly when his name was mentioned, as
though cherished relative had gone
astray.
But four weeks ago the Mugwumps were
claiming Postmaster-General Villas rs their
own. They had not anticipated an acces-
sion to their ranks from the broad, bound
ing, uncomfortable West where the law of
the corner-grocery Medes and Persians re-
quires a man to be either fish, flesh or
fowl; and hence they were supernaturally
happy. They knew that out West an or
nithorhynchus, or a calf with five legs, or
Il gascutis, is only tolerated in the con-
fines of a dime museum and therefore,
the shock of a developing Mugwump from
that direction turned their hearts and
their heads with favor toward toward the
setting snn.
The Mugwumps deceived themselves.
They thought they had kept the sunshine
of heaven from creeping into the Depart
ments" by way of the transom, because
they had closed the kitchen blinds.
Postmaster-G General Villas wrote circu-
lar to the Democratic Congressman of Ohio
defining the mctes and bounds of offensive
partisanship. He even went so far as to
intimate that the postmasters who have
blended the business of running news
paper in the interest of the Republican
party with the duties of running the post
offices in the interest Of the same political
organization were rascals, within the
meaning of the civil-service law, and
should be turned out.
The Mugwumps are shocked, the Dem
ocrats are jubilant, the Republicans are
indignant, and the people are pleased
Wepresume that Postmaster-General Villa
could come back and be forgiven now i
he would only confess that his "were-you
ever-indicted" circular was written by
some of his wicked subordinates.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
THE MAN WHO WAITS.

wall of distress comes from London to
the New York Tribune because Minister
Phelps ranks the very last in the list of
seven ambassadors and twenty-three min
istcrs at the Court of St. James. But what
oft? What if Mr., Phelps is compelled to
cool his heels on the cold, gray steps of
Downing street while the representatives
of thirty inferior powers pass into the For
oien Office ahead of him.
The diplomatic business of thc United
States can wait It has waited before
without injury, 1t can wait again with
ont damage.
The business which this Government
has to transact with England through its
minister plenipotentiary ana envoy eS-
traordinary need not be transacted i'm
haste, for while Minister Phelps may be
standing respectfully in the corridors of
the Foreign Office waiting till the affairs
Of liayti and Guatemala are settled, the
Texas steer is tearing along toward Char
ing Cross, and Chicago canned beef is
rolling into every English household from
Miles End to London Bridge, and Kansas
wheat is furnishing bread to millions OF
Her Maicsty's subjects, and Missouri corn
is becoming the staple grain Of foreign
markets.
What if Minister Phelps does wait? lie
has plenty of time, and il is something To
get perspective Of the backs of thirty
ambassadors and ministers whose govern
ments are dependent for bread and dmeaI
on the government Of the man who wait
In thc hallway
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

written a note to a lady Think of it, We
gods and little lishesl And what has the
lady done2 Sent him her photograph,
which Mrs. Gladstone quietly returned to
its owner. Such conduct is objectionable
1t is rcprehensible. In short, it is so
rare an instance in the history of crime
that Gladstone deserves the sevcrest pun
ishment by way of an example. This
could never have occurred in Paris, where
one Napoleon, "oftener on his knees than
on his feet, died every day he lived.
Such peccadillo would be impossible at
Berlin, where the morganatic marriage is
sometimes thing of beauty. And, of
course, it could not have happened in
Washington!
If there is any law in England, it should
be applied to Gladstone Mt once. This
thing of an elderly gentleman, who at the
age Of scventy-six ought to have known
better, writing q pleasant note to a lady,
should be stopped, if it overturns every
government on earth. There is no qucs.
ton of its iniquity. But perhaps it would
be as well for "him that is without sin to
cast the first stone"
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

TIE Colombian Government has n
unique way of Furnishing its rebels.
Aizpuro and half dozen of his followe s
are to be conveyed to the headwaters of
the Amazon placed in canoes with thrc Q
months provision and sent floating dow II
the river into wilderness never but once
penetrated by white man. inhabited by
savage cannibals, venomous reptiles, fero-
cious animals and where clouds of mos
quitoes deadly miasmas and terrible heat
are horrors added to the dreariness and
dcsolation of the land This cruel mode
of punishment is certainly original, but
should Aizpuro survive he will have II
surer thing on the lecture platform than
General Reyes has on the military govern
mcnt of Colombia
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

"THE NATIONAL CAPITAL is the title of
a volume just issued by the Post Publish
ing Company which will doubtless find
wide circulation. 1t is not only the hand
soonest book of the kind ever published,
but by far The most complete, abounding
in illustrations executed under the artistic
supervision of Mr.. Nealy and in historical
sketches and other information regarding
the seat of Government, collated with the
utmost care and otherwise inaccessible cx-
cept at much labor and expense. In
letter press, binding and embellishments
the book is simply superb, and reflects
great credit upon Mr. Stilson Hutchins
and Mr. Joseph West Moore, to whose
joint efforts and authorship the exceeding
cleverncss of the work is due
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
FOR SELE---Lots.
LOTS IN THE CITY.

CHEAPEsT LOTS IN THE CITY.
BEAUTIFUL SITES ON COLUMBIA HEIG HTS,
fronting on 18th streer extended and ON Hol-
mead road; being fashionable drive from
14th street to Soldiers Home Park;
SMALL CASH PAYMENTS;
long deferred payments for balance; small
rate OF interest; property rapidly increasing
In valuei streets newly graded, with cutters,
water and gas lamps.
Lots sold for 5 per cent. OF purchase money
In cash, and balance In monthly payments TO
suit.
Street. cars run within one square OF all
these lots.
A rare chance for great bargains,
For full particulars, plat OF ground and
terms, apply 10
HENRY d. GREEN, or
JOHN L. BEALL,
mr31-tf Id f at. n. W.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
NAuGnTY MR.. GLApsroNE.

The opponents of Mr.. Gladstone, find
ing no other recourse of any avail, have
finally resorted to scandal--the last weapon
of q mean and pusillanimous spirit. An
Jrishman would disdain such weapon.
An Irishman would have gallantry enough
and chivalry enough to blind his eyes and
close his ears in presence of tales that are
told against a woman.
And what has Gladstone done2 Actually
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

GENERAL WoLsELEy says in a dispatch
10 the Home Government that the Mahdi
is in the direst straits. But he does not
claim that what he has done hurt him.
This is very modest on the part Of Wolse.
1,Nr
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

SENATOR BLACKBURN has also had an
interview with the President and come
away satisfied. With Senator Blackburn
and Colonel Wattcrson satisfied, the Adj
ministration can continue business at the
old stand
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
FOR ERCHRH9E.

WANTED-TO EXCHANGE NEW STOVE
w for old ones at Buffers Stove Exchange
corner 9TH and X sts. smoky cnimneys cured
or no ray, Stoves exchanged for grocerie
Old stoves bought.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

THAT sterling, enterprisng and emf
ncntly successful newspaper, the Balti-
more sun, celebrates its forty-ninth birth
day today
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

THE first Of the District appointments is
a good one, Mr.. Cropley, the new collect
or of Georgetown, is business man of
high reputation, an old resident and Il life
long Democrat He answers all the quail
ifcntions
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

THE real reason for closing the White
House to the public on Saturdays h s
leaked out at last 1t is all owing to the
Breakfast Table Letter with which our
esteemed Republican contemporary in
sists upon regalng the President, week after
week, on the morning of that day, Mr..
Cleveland stood its mesmeric influence as
long as he could, but finally concluded
that he might as well shut up shop and
go to bed, leaving few trusty somnam
bulists to guard the outer door.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
dHCTLnM SALES.
III O. WELLS 4 CO., Auctioneers,
LIE sos Pa. ave. and 007 La. ave.

.NNN~~>~>oNDNroNN>y>> >y>>e.>.N N,o,lN,,NNNNNN>NNNN w,
II O. WELLS h CO., Auctioneers,
liz sos Pa. ave. and 007 La. ave.
We will sell at auction on TUESDAY MORN.
ING, MAY 10, at 10 O'CLOCK, a large assort-
ment VI new and secondhand Furniture, COM
sisting OF Parlor and Chamber SUITE, NJ. Il.
Bureaue, Bedstoads, wardrobee, Wasnstands,
Chaire, Lounges, Common Tables, &C.; also,
Carpets in Tapestry, Brussels and straw Mat
Unge, ReffigeratOrs and Baby Carriages,
CrocBery In Table and Toilet Ware.
myls IL H. @. WELLS 4 90.
DuvALL Il MARI, Auctioneere, 925 ST..
AT AUCTION, VALUABLE BUSINESS PROP
ERTY ON THE SOUTHEAST CORNER OF
TENTH STREET AND PENNSYLVANIA \
AVENUE, BEING No. 836 PENNSYLVA ANA
AVENUE NORTHWEST.
We will offer for sale, to close an estate, on
HALF.PAST FOUR p. M, lots lettered o, <yA
ID and Il, in the subdivision Of the west. IWl
ern part OF square $50, said lots fronting ~
feet 10 inches on Pennsylvania avenue and 8S
feet, more or less, on 10th street. plat Will
be shown at time OF sale.
Terms: Cash. deposit OF $500 Will be re-
quired when bid Is accepted. IL the terms Of
eale are not compiled with within ten 40
days after day of sale, the property Will be re-.
sold at tho risk and cost OF the defaultlng pur-
chaser. All coDveyancing at cost OF purchaser.
DUvALL MARI, Auctloneers.
on account OF the rain the above sale ia
postponed TO MONDAY, MAY IS, 1885, same
hour and place.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
BOARDING.

THE LA PIERRE, q. W. CORNER OF TENTH
Il and Il streets, and tho Lochiel, 6l2 Ninth
81. d. W., with pleasant rooms and good board,
ore recommended 10 permanent and traneient
boarders. jy12
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

SOME people say that it was Representa-
tive Beriah wilkins of Ohio who gave
publicity to the confidential letter of Post
master-Gcnerar Villas; others that it was
Representative Henley of California.
Whoever it was evidently knew what con-
stituted good reading TIE CRITIC is in
clined to agree with the New York
Graphic, that ''the letter is all right and
that the man who published it deserves
thanks.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
FOR RENT.-AElscaLLnnanus.


ENOR RENT-THE THIRD FLOOR OF THE
IL building 8. W. cor. 9th and E sts. n. W.;
olso a brick stable situated In Temperance
alley. Apply at 912 st. II. W. my7 CT
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

THE Mackay-Bennctt Commercial Gable
Company has extended its European con-
nections to Berlin and Hamburg in Ger
many, to Vienna in Austria, to Geneva in
Switzerland to Marseillcs and Bordeaux
in France. Its tariff from New York to
all parts of Great Britain, France and Ger
many is forty cents Il word.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
wOGg SRO CGdL

--010001l7000000(l-70---
CoALI WOOD
JOHNSON BROS,
WHARyEs AND RAILROAD YARD
18th and Water Sts. s. W.
BRANCH YARDS AND OFFICES.
CONNECTED by Telephone.)
1902 y street northwest.
1915 Seventh street northwest.
1740 PeDpeylvania ave. northwest.
1I12 Ninth street northwest.
Corner I'd and streets northwest.
my6u 22l pennsylvania ave. southwest.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
HOUSE PAINTS So 4; g: $j::$i

Building Supplies, Nos. 9OS 9l0, 9l2 and 9li q
street, three doors west Of the Patent Office, Inn
mediRtely adjoining National Rides Armory,
than at any other establishment la the city. II
you wish to'bpy even the smallest quantity OF
white lead oils, varnish colors, dry or In oil etc,
send your address on postal card and printed
prce'list OF every article sold In this department
will be sent to you by return mall reaching You
In a few hours time by letter carrier This price
list gives the price OF hafpint, pint, quart, half.
gallon. gallon, and five gallons of each kind OF
oil, tprpeniine, dryer, varnsh aud other liquids
sold by measure; also, price Der qnarter-pound,
lfpound, pound hye, ten, twenty-five ana
loo pounds OF each article sold by weight also, list
and prices of misce llapeous articles The prices
are graded according to the quantity bought,
Large buyers get very lowest prices small buy
efs pay slightly higher rate. MY prices are
liked. All buyers buying the same quantity pay
the same price. The Inexperienced buyer gets
the same price as the Oldest painter II he buys the
aRme quantity.
by messenger. telephone or by mall ana they will
be filled promptly and the bill, as per price-llst,
collected on delivery. Goods delivered TO ali
parts Of the city.
grown 70 satisfactory proportions. now give my
special attention to the Paint Department. aud
expect, by having full supply OF first class
goods, selling them Rt low prcea and making
prompt deliveries, 10 secure a liberal share OF
JAMES II. MoGILL.
Dealer IN Building supplies,
00S 10, 9l2 and Ga q street.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
EDUCATIONAL.


THE HOWE BUSINESS SCHOOL, 517 SEW.
Il enth street n. W, Short condensed course
In practical bookkeeping, rapid penmanship
and English branches at moderate rates or
tuition. Morning, afternoon and night ses'
sions. Civil-Service preparation speciality.
Shorthand, Elocutlon and Mathematics by
special teacher.
ap30-tf y. II, BRYANT, Principal.
ID UsINESs EDUCATION for young and mid
ID die aged men aud women. Spring and
summer sessions Of the Spencerian Business
College, corner Ninth and d sts. NV Rapid
writing, bookkeeping, rapid calculations, Eng
lish language, stenography, type-writing, ETC.,
thoroughly taught TultiOni Year from date
OF entrance, day or night, $50; three months,
day, S20i night, SD; one month, day, S7
night, 50. Rapid writing only IL lessons 49,.
Gall or send for circulars.
henry q. SPENCER, Principal.
SARA A, SPENCER, Vice Principal.
NORWOOD INSTITUTE, 1912 AND 1914
IN 14th ST., near l4th st. Circle. Select Board
ing School for young ladies'. Session Sb-'S6
opens September 80, 1885. Early application
necessary, as number OF boarders Will be
limited.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
PROPOSALS..
FOR STATIONERY.
PosToFHoE DEPARTMENT,

PoST0FEICE DEPARTMENT.,
WASHINGTON, ID. O.. May IL, 1855.
Sealed proposals VIII be received at this De-
partment until IL o'clock m. on Wednesday.
June %, 1886, for furnishing Stationery for
the use of First and Second Glass Postonlces
for one year from July !, 1885.
Blank forms Of proposals showing the Items
and estimated quantities required, together
with circular relating thereto, Will be fur
niehed on application to this Department.
Proposals should De addressed tn the First
Assistant Postmaster General, and indorsed
"Proposals for stationery"
The Postmaeter-Generalr reserves the right
to reject any or all bids.
wM.F. Villas,
my15-2taw,dw Postmaster General.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
LOST AND FOUND.

dt9n REWARD WILL BE PAID FOR RE-
tcAU turn OF gentlemans gold watch and
part Of chain lost on night OF May z, or $o
will be given for pawn ticket and no questions
asked. No higher reward will be offered. Il.
II. Wade, 406 G. st. II, W. my1S-3l"
I OST-LASr WEEK RED IRISH SET TER
~ gip dog, answers to the name of Nell;
name on collar OF DR.. Morrow. A liberal re-
ward viii be paid II returned TO SOB 9th st. NJ.
W., or 4i4 9th st. Q. W. myl0.3t%
GOO REwARD-IF THE PARTY WHO TOOK
tNAV gold watch and part OF chain from
gentleman on night of May Will return the
same TO owner the above reward Will be paid
or SO for pawn ticket, or any reliable infor-
nation concerning same, and no questions
viii be asked. Il. H. Wade, 405 q st. II. W.
my12-3t*
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
RED TICKET DAY.
Red Ticket Day Friday.
#""G #""G ! M #####$###$$l. IN !: SIS. SIS.
J. 3 Az ! TMM MMMMM $ &
BBBB A A UUU NJ Nj N ssss

WHENEVER THIS HEADING AP.
PEARS IN OUR ADVERTISEMENT,
BEAR IN MIND THAT ON THAT DAY
DAY
SOME OF THE MOST PHENOMENAL
RED BARGAINS EVER OFFERED BY ANY
TICKET ONE IN ANY CITY WILL BE OF
DAY FERED BY Us.
WE DoTHIS MOTTO CATCH TRADE
. ThnoUaH ANY HUMBUd, WE SIM.
- PLY CLAIM WE SELL GOODS AS
CHEAP As ANY HOUSE IN THE
RED COUNTRY, AND OUR srRIor RULE
TICKET is, NOT TO BE UNDERsoLD BY ANY
DAY ONE. WE HAVE ONE PRICE
STRICTLY, DO CASH BUSHES, !,
ONLY; THEREFORE, WE ARE PRE-.
PARED TO MEET ALL ooMPETI.
TIoN ON
RED RED TICKET DAY.
TICKET WHICH WILL BE ON FRIDAY OF
DAY EACH WEEK. WE SHALL EXHIBIT
AT BIp1oULoUsLY Low PRICES
RED
TIoKET - = - :
PLUS OF AND ARE sEAsoNABLE.
DAY
REMEMBER, ON FRIDAYS
OUR RED TICKET DAY.
BBBB A U u NM NM M .ssss.
Is II AA u u MINI MMm s s.
b B "A U uMMMM"
BBBB A A u UMMMM SSSS
I + AAA Y UMMMMMMMM {
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

"WHAT is so rare as day in Junc?"
asks James Russell Lowell in one of his
cleverest poems, If Mr.. Lowell will con
descend to visit Washington about this
time of year, he will have no trouble in
picking out a good many days in May
that are quite as rare as those Of June
Here, if anywhere, are perfect days" to
be found at almost any season.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18

THE Providence Republicans say that
Charles II. Henshaw was appointed col
lector of internal revenue for Rhode
Island solely because he is one of the Pres
ident's personal friends. Even if the story
be true, which it may be or may not we
cannot see that it should occasion great
public alarm. If Mr.. Henshaw is u man
whom the President knows can be trusted,
all the better for the revenue service.
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
WAH7ED--Rooms.


w NTANTED-PLEASANT MODERATE SIZED
w room by a lady who is a seamstress
rent not TO exceed SO per month. Address
Mrs. Fisher, Critic office. myIl-3t%
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
WANTED---Houses.

N00~NN>-s>~-~>.>-4>-NNNN-
\XTANTED-To BUY A 10 OR ~ ROOM
w house, with all mod, imps In good cen
tral location, for cash. Address, with partlcu'
lare, s. s., Star ofilce. Must be a bargain.
mV1D.atH
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
BUSINESS CHANCES.

WY IANTED-A PARTNER WITH $500 TO
w go in q paying business for the sum-
mer months. Apply at 224 Sd st. n. W.
my18-3t*
VNTANTED-S1OO FOR YEARS AT g PER
w cent; lrst mortgage on real estate In
this city Address BID 9tn st. n. W. my11-3t*
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
MONEY TO LOAN.


ITO LOAN-$200, $500, $400, $500 ON
Il satisfactory security. A. LLOYD,
"Marshal Law Building s."
ilmy6-H 3l9 4la st. n. ".
T HAVE MONEY TO LOAN ON GOOD REAL
l. estate or collat u al security at lowest rates
OF Interest. No delay when security Is good.
o. O. GREEN, Room 1, Firemen's building,
cor. 9TH and La. ave. ap14-tf
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
PERSONAL.

I'HE REASON sIlCB CROWDS 60 TO THE
Il Forsyth cafe, 5lS .ronth 81, ia simp,y be.
cause they get the most and boat fare in the
city for the least money. Meals, 15 cts. rnvfS
DRoFEssoR OF MUSIC RECOVERED FRO VI
l. sickness I'm need gives lessons singing,
organ and piano % cents per lesson. Address
Teacher, Critic ONCE. mv1S.3t%
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
WhN7ED--Situat,ons--

VyTANTEC-BY TWO COLORED WOMEN
w situations rs house cleaners, washers
or 10 work out by the day. Clll at 3lS L 81.
NV. mylS-3t*
The Washington critic. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1885-1888, 1885-05-18
WANTED Heip--Femdie.

Advertisements OF Three Lines under this hes
Inserted three times for 25 cents