The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1885-11-11
WIT AND PLEASANTLY.

Sam Jones affirms that some women are
fools. This IS undoubtedly true. but there
are still old MAIDS left.-Boston Transcript.
He-"YOu don't sing or play. Then |
presume you write or paint" She 20, no;
IN like the young men we meet in society.
] simply sit around and try TO look inteili-
gent. Harper Bazaar.
A Brooklyn woman haas been awarded 800
for damages sustained by reason vi another
woman calling her "a Shanghai hem Per.
sons can not be too careful how they handle
their barnyard metaphors. IL is all right to
call woman duck, or dear little chick,
tut it is dangerous and expensive to put her
among the Old hens and geese.
Hes not what you call strictly hand
sOme,' said the major, beaming through his
glasses on homely baby that lay bowling
in his mothers arms, but it's the kind of
face that grows on YOU ITS not the kind
Of face that ever grew on you," was the in
dignant and unexpected reply OF the mater
nal being; you'd be better looking il you
had"
David David relates that in speech once
he said after the grandlOquet fashion of the
stump: Il know no East, no West, no North,
no South rude auditor piped up:
Then you'd better 90 home and study up
your jogerphy." 1T broke me ali up, saws
the judge, and from that on till the close of
my address there were no personal magnet
ism in my bursts of campaign eloquence.'
4 citizen who had been playing poker the
night before, dropped blue chip into the
contribution box by mistake. After service,
he went to the deacon who had passed the
plate, and told him of his mistake $50 I'll
just give you dollar in its place" he said,
'and we'll keep the matter quiet" NO, YOU
DON'T" replied the deacon, ignoring the
money offered, that's a blue chip. It's
worth five dollars"
Captain Smith a Georgia LAWYER tells a
good Joke on himself which he says happened
ala Nashville, Ga, court last week. A ne
gro was being tried for murder, and, being
able 20 employ counsel. the Court appointed
Captain smith to defend him. They had
gone into the case and had proceeded good
way. Captain Smith using his best legal skill
for the poor fellow, when the negro turned
10 him and said: Locke here. boss, amt
dey gwine ter give US lawyer"
Some years ago Senator Butler of south
carolina. was one of a party Of gentlemen at
Fargo, Dakota. \ country doctor came up
10 aim and asked. Are YOU General Butler
OF south Carolina? My name is DIR. Shaw
i am, responded the Senator. The doctor
looked him over deliberately and carefully
and then remarked Well YOU don't look
like man who'd Kill niggers." 'No, | don't
suppose I've killed as many as you have
replied General Butler. Ii was some time
time before the doctor saw what the crowd
was laughing at.
Matilda SNOWFALL i the eolored cook of an
Austin family, and is much addicted to
male society. A few evenings ago she said
to Mrs. Peterby, the lady for whom she
condescended to cook at SO month IF
you please mum, Is gwine ter pra'r meetin'
dis ebenin' wild my only .brudder. and I'll
not be back till hit breaks up, 80 | wants de
key Ob de front gate 3" nice sort of
brother he j. 10 doubt" retorted Mrs Peter
by, who has her own ideas about colored
prayer-meetings. Yes, mum, my brudder
am gemman Use been acquainted with
him cher sence came ter Austin, two yeahs
ago. Texas Siftings.