Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-09-27

more frightened than hurt, observer
that substantial compensation for per-
sonal injury might possibly be wruug
out of the perpetrator Of the deed. and
with that object in view he should COM
municate with his solicitor. As the in
dignant master Of the maltreated "but-
tons, announced this determination
who should appear on the scene but the
Major himself. apparently, from the
blue-red appearance Of his visage, on
the point of being seized with apoplexy,
and carrying his gun in n manner not at
ali calculated to inspire any one with
unlimited confidence in the bearers
knowledge of the precise use Of hre-
arms.
"Iye done il " exclaimed the in
truder, grimly, bringing down the butt
end of his gun heavily onto the floor
and glazing wildly upon those around
him.
YES" said Mr.. Chuckles, with dig
nified calmness, "you have done 1t.
Gaze upon that poor boy there, the VIC
tim Of your inaccurate AIM
"See here, Guv'nor," whimpered the
injured individual alluded to. " When
next you goes for to aim at co-cochln-
chiner, don't 60 for to hit hinnercent
cove like me-"
"You wretched offshoot Of brim-
stone.'' cried the Infatuated Major,
how dare you insinuate that my gun
practice is Dot-er-what it should be !!
When ! was in the"
Before the afTfonted marksman could
splutter out the remainder Of his speech
the door was quickly opened, and Mr..
Frank Featherwell entered the room,
closely followed by Mary Ellen, who was
hanging her pretty little head and blush
ing in the most bewitchingly becoming
manner, like the conscious culprit she
undoubtedly considered herself. The
addition to the little party affected the
latter in various ways. Mr.. Chuckles
stared and frowned upon Frank; while
the Major looked askance at the donor
of untamed poultry. Mrs. Chuckles
caught her daughters eye, and mods
and wreathed smiles, with other signs,
were freely passed between the pair in
quick and evidently ineligible sue
cession.
"Pray, do not let us interrupt the
harmony" said Frank in cheerful
and airy manner. 81 think, Major
Ironlungs," he went on, "you were
speaking as opened the door, and if
am not much mistaken, the words which
fell upon my ear were, when | was in
the Proceed, my dear Major
do not deprive us of your doubtlessly
interesting "reminiscences"
81 was merely going to mention the
fact" said the Major, in a considerably
subdued manner, THAT when | was II
the army"
Pardon me, Major" interrupted
Frank, smilingly, but I'm somewhat
of a stickler for accuracy; was it no
in that branch Of the auxiliary forces
known as the militia where"
"Well. sir, and pray, what if it were
the miltia?" and the sometime mem
Der of that excellent but often deride(
branch Of England's brave defenders
scowled savagely, and did not seem t
be altogether at his ease.
"Only the militia " exclaimed Mrs
Chuckles, in contemptuous tones, Will
that young imp Tiddlewinks indulge'
himself by screwing up his face int
, an assortment Of new and improved
| grimaces.
t, "A militiaman after all !" observes
; Mr.. Chuckles, sticking his thumbs int
; his waistcoat armholes in the approves
; manner, at the same time throwing gu
bis chest. "Why, | think I'm equo
to a soldier of that calibre so advis
you, Mr.. Militaman, to keep that wea
pom of yours quiet before Acciden
> No. . happens"
"Do your" sneeringly returned tn
Major.
. "Why, cert'nly," facetiously ar
swered Mr.. Chuckles, gaining cont
e dence as the enemy's increasing dl'
comfture became apparent; lat a
= events, in my house, sir. If you reall
think that a few extra firing drill
: would improve your practice, 60 an
practice on your own domestics."
: "In course" ventured to remark tn
now excessively delighted and GRIMM
buttons" whose injuries had bee
purely imaginary " and mind you tax
: better aim-yah :"
The discounted blusterer divine
: that if he stayed any longer he woul
be pretty certain to hear things said {
;, him which would by no means conduC
to his serenity of mind, so he shoulder
J ed his gun, and giving a final glare a
= round, beat hasty retreated, followe
. by the smiles Of all.
"And now" said Mr.. Chuckle
n turning with an air Of authority to Fran
: and the fair runaway, "pray what
y the meaning of this?"
e Oh, pa, dear; do forgive u.s.
pleaded the brand-new bride. "
u was all my fault it was, really"
Forgive! Your fault? What
g your FAULT" queried the perplexe
IS Chuckles.
1.-The fact is" said Frank, steppir
forward to the relief Of his bride, ar
). holding out his hand to his newly-mat
% father-in-law, me-l-that is-ar
le your daughter-dear Mary Ellen-a
married."
is Married :" exclaimed Mr.. Chuckle
J, How? When? Where?"
- "My dear-father-in the usu
/ way-half an hour ago-at the lit
church round the corner" prompt
). answered Frank, delighted and su
1t prised that the old gentleman took Il
l. matter so quietly.
Without my consent, eh, yC
lie young"
y "Well-er-you see, sir-circur
IS stances"
What is the state OF your exch
" quer, sir ?" interrupted Mr.. Chuckle
n looking more severely than hehad
e yet done.
n Frank, who had naturally anticipate
r. some such question, evidently appear'
'r fully prepared with satisfactory a
70 swer. 81 regret,n said he, - to infor