The Sunday herald. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1866-1887, 1885-07-26
TRAIN TALK.
Laramie Boomerang. l


An old farmer-like chap came aboard q train down
near Gaesburg. lie looked as II he was yearning to
talk to somebody. Approaching plug-haited, dig
nided gentleman, he inquired:
sis 1t hot" But here the plug hated man
turned his back upon the farmer
Bat the old gentleman was not discouraged.
SIS 1t hot hut here the drummer raised his
newspaper between bis face and the qnestoners,
everywhere met with the same rebuff. Finally he
got mad and shouted:
81 s'pose you smart alecR fellers think wanted
to ask you II 1t was hot enough for you, out didn't
never ask no such questions OF no man. I've got
some hne old 1897 whisky In my pocket here, an
to make a good drink attractive. / never like ia
drink alone, but seems there's no other gentleman
in the car guess III have to-"
one drummer OF another, as the pair settled down
over large majority of four seats.
Never heard d Of the game. You mean progress.
''No, progressive poker. I've played It. This ia
the way 1t goes: You start In at the beginning of
dollar ante and fifty limit is good enough for you.
Pretty soon you think twenty-five cent ante and ten
dollar limit q pretty nice game. Next you come
and quarter limit. Yon couldn't II you wanted to
T TSs, what Ic call prog festive poker '
"Why didn't you say so In the first place? I've
played that game myself"
81 never see a man take drink In q saloon, u
cident that happened me once. Just as we started
to work one evening" was working with Q switch
crew then called Us over to the saloon "a
time, but az 1t wasn't often we got treat rushed
over and hurried up to the bar aud said: II want
little whisky, and as I'm 10 hurry won't walt fol
the rest Of you, hut will take my three nngers right
or Those were the exact words ! used. had
cause enough to remember them, for ten minutes
later, as was making my first coupling, was care
less, on account OF the wh!sky, I've always believed
and this was the result Here the brakeman held up
his hand, from which three fingers were missing.
"Charles," said a sharp voiced woman to her hus-
band, do you know that you and ! once had 9
"Neyer heard OF IT," replied Charles In q snbdued
tone.
II thought you hadn't, but don't you remember
that 1t was That pair OF slippers presented you last
Chrlstmas-the Christmas before we were married.
they lifted, don't yong wei, Charles one day when
We were going to picnic YOU had your feet upon a
meal MEASURE But fof that pair Of slippers don't be-
lieve we'd ever been married."
young unmarried man sitting near by immedi
ately took his feet down from seat.
"The Michigan girls are all right" said y young
man In response 70 inquiry by one OF his fellow
irayeers "they are all right. Have just spent two
weeks up there at semi fashionable summer re-
sort. Delightful evenings and nice girls The only
objection have to them ID that they are altogether
TOO expert In killing mosquitoes"
"What objection can there be TO that?
"We, you see, they are 80 ALFRED quick about 1t
that the mosquito can't get away ut all He ls fiat
tened out and smeared on right where he lights
When that happens to be cheek or an upper lip Il
isn't so deuced pleasant for fellow, you Know"
A couple OF sporty-ooking Young men met acct
dentally on an Alton tram.
"HellO here" exclaimed one, "where are yot
going? fave you quit playing base ball?"
"Yes," was the reply, "l've quilt. I'm going Int,
educational work. Am on my way TO st. Louii
now. Expect TO open kindergarten there"
"A what 2"
"a kindergarten base ball kindergarten I.uca
mas promised to enter all OF his players al pupils"
"Isee In the paper remarked passenger TO hl
Vile, that Secretary Whitney has given orderstha
hereafter the marines shall dress In uniforms o
more subdued colors."
set is quite evident" she replied, that the Score
tary y prejudlced against certain color'"
(Which one2"
"Ultra-marine."