The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1885-04-08
Selected.
THE COMPOTE OF APPLESs3
From the Spanish Of Ant0nt0 De
Irueba

There was once King, but l do not
know OF what, for history is always so
iiresOIne about questions and answers that
I have never dared to Inquire. The only
thing L do know Is that he was called Peri
CO, and that he had married certain Mari
Castana, and also thai he passed his life
thinking how be could form good cabinet
of officers. and saying, when every one
turned out worse than the last: 1t IL
enough 10 make my nose swollen!
Mari Castana, the Queen, WAS famous
cook and looked upon politics with lndf-
ference. In those days there were none of
those intimate relations between politics
and dining, for, like other barbarians, the
people had never thought of very simple
thing; to fortify the heart it Is enough to
for,ify the stomach, its neighbor, and half
glass is enough to kindle patriotic
glow
His wife's indifference to politics trouh-
led King Perico greatly, and such discus
sions as these were quite common between
Their Mujrsties
do you know, wife, / think see how
We Can vary cur course"
"But it is varied every day."
"You are mistaken; it has never been
varied"
"Was there ever such forgetful mani
Anybody would think never took any
pains not to have the same course at table
two days in succession"
But, wife, it was Of other courses l
was speaking"
"Why, how am to ct you others when
everything In the market is as high as the
clouds, and do not know how l am to lay
hold of thing"
"How you run on! With your absurd
fancy for cooking you mix up things in the
strangcsI--"
"No, don't. There is no fault to he
found in the things l mix. No King, be he
King Of what he may, ever eat better
mixed salad than that you have just eaten"
"WumaU, listen to me and do not scorch
"Do you presume to say that there was
anything scorched on the breakfast table
thi- morn ng'
81 have not said anything of the kind.
But will say this: that there is no talk
ing any sense with you, and l shall leave
you before my nose becomes swollen"
And the squabble erued by the Kings
going 10 his private room to bury himself
in political affairs, while the Queen hurried
to the kitchen to see if The soup needed
skmming.
These alterations afforded King Perico
some very lively moments. He was feel
ing OF his nose one morning and finding 1t,
as he thought, a littl. swollen, he made up
his mind to forbid the Queen formally from
entering the kitchen; but an unexpected
event changed the appearance of affairs
and subsequently proved that he mud been
mistaken 10 his symptoms.
AS the King rarely left the palace and as
The Quetn went out TO market every morn
ing, all petitions addressed to Their Majes-
ties naturally tell into the hands OF the
Queen. Que morning, while she was at
tue fish market cheapening the price Of a
CO fish, ragged lad approached her and
respectfully handed her a petition and i'm
me0iately ran away.
The paper contained these words. your
Hi9hnrss-The exponent is faithful SUBJ
ject to your Majesty, and MS q proof Of it,
now out Of office, for Your Mujesty's per-
1dious advisers have cleared him out to
put in donkey out of one Of their own
families. So after that he thinks 1t his
duty to let Your Majesty know that Your
Msjesty's treacherous ministers are pre-
pairing great pie as present; and he
says no more, for he who has good I'M
dersta ndlng, ETC."
''What impudsnce. what audacity! what
iniquity" exclaimed Queen Mari Cistana
aug,iiy on reading it. "ro think there
should be any one in the palace who should
W udhc Wu"u 'uoe 10 ny
speciality; that any one should attempt to
make pastry after the receipt Of my most
noble glory. The King shall know of 1t
directly, aud if His Majesty does not hang
these traitors the Instant he has read 1t,
we shall know the reason why"
And the Queen began to run toward the
palace, more angry at every step.
"Perico!" she called out to her husband.
"read, read this paper and STE what your
perfdious advisers are plannin Hung
them Instantly: have no mercy, or else |
will put corrosive sublimate in your soup
Instead of salt"
King Perco had his suspicious that the
pie mentioned 10 the paper would be less
easy of digestion than the Queens and be-
gan Investigations with that prudence and
sa.acity which affairs of state require.
Tue result proved that the object of his
ministers was nothing less than his de-
struction.
The traitors were arrested and senten ced
| to death.
Finding no mercy in the King, whose
| nose was for the first time In his life really
| swollen, the copspirat,rs soush the Q ieen.
| On learning that they were guillless OF
| trying to rival her IN what she did with
such perfection, she iDterceded for them so
| ,fficaciously with her august spouse that
his anger was appeased.
"Well," said the King to his wife, "since
you have given your word, grant them
their lives and Am content with banshing
them. must confess that to YOU alone be-
longs the art of making pastry"
| The Queen was 30 inspired upon hearing
this eulogy that from that day may be dat
ed the delicious of the vol.au-veut.
"Just teink." said King Perico to him
self. "fiom what deuce of a catastrophe
my wife's taste for cooking has saved me
But for that she would have wrapped the
codf-h up In the petition. and | should
l u, yer have known what these sharpers
we're about. l, must be granted that Prov
idence does not act blindly. Our august
spouse must be permitted to exercise the
talent God has given her. But how, by
the mass, am to Tree myself from the
crowds OF iogues around me. The bad
prrupt the good and the corruption seems
to be spreading 1T such rate That in lie
years do not see how there can be ~
honest public servant. am to blame fol
being such coward. But mercy! my nose
10 swollen to-day In good earnesl"
The Kings disgust At the corruption OF
his officers went on increasing, and in thu
same ratio increased the Queens affection
for the culinary art.
I Now and then the King wished this low
j Of cooking AZ the devil, but as rule h