The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1885-03-31
suRROS AND CANOES.
Couple of YARNS from Schneider's Little
Back Room i'm the Rear Of the Grocery

A Couple of YARNS from Schneider's Little
Back Room I'm the Rear Of the Grocery.
BlifkinS has been spending the past
summer in the Southwest. but returned
TO Detroit tn vote. On the evening of
his arrival an informal reception was
held in Schneiier'> little back room.
The guest of che occasion had been di-
lating nj considerable length upon the
sights he had seen on his trip. and the
dangers lie htri encountered and sur
viyrd. AMI particularly his first and only
attempt To- ride hIIrru: IN attempt
that terminated in about thirty seconds
and confined him To the house for =
! week. He concluded with the declar'l-
ton that Il he was going to California
he would xllk every step of the way in
preference to trying to ride a bUrro
there.
''0h. snuckS, IL easy 'nough to ride
any long-eared boss that ever bucked.
just YOU wait till you've mounted a
birchbark canec. Blif. and you'll walk
when YOU want TO 90 To Windsor.
The assertion came from Bill MatSOn.
who was slowly but surely cropping his
way towards the bottom of bootleg of
beer.
You're talking about something thas
YOU don't knew nothing about, Bill.
mo. 1 amt. Blif. As the married
sehool-ma' am laid when she reached
down for her slipper to spank her cYn
youngun. I've had 'sperunce."
You don't mean To- tell me that any
down-E.a>t Yankee like YOU ever nayi-
gated birchbark canoe. do YOU Rill?''
Il didn't say had, Blif."
What are YOU talking about. them"
but tried it once. jest e. YOU tried
to ride the donk; and L got off quicker'n
YOU did"
Tell It's shout il. Bill.' shouted the
reception committee, and one of them
motioned to Schneider that Bill :
| schooner should make another voyage
to the keg.
When / was q boy. down in New
York. there wa mt chap in our dig
! gins that | couldn't throw in awraStle,
lick at rough-and tumble. out-holler, or
do up in any fashion. l brought that
con>ait with ME To Michigan. but 1t had
bad chill afore I "a been here 4 week
| and died inside of a month. The
funeral occurred jest about the time /
tried TO git acquainted with Il canoe.
1T was up 10 the 500. I'd been
there two or three days a-watchin' them
pe>ky Iniuns come a-whoOpin' in with
their loads of fish. standin' up in their
canoes and a-splurgin' away with a
4 II 10 MI
then on t'other, and / jest thought as
how Id buy me canoe and show the
varmints how a white mans back
looked when he was a-rowin'.
Il paid tarnal redskin fifteen dol
lars for his canoe, pulled off my coat.
stepped in. picked up the paddle. and
| gave Il sweep on one side Jest kerZackly
~ the Injun did. You needn't never
ask me how it happened boys, for |
dom know. L thought the burned thing
| turned over and sunk. but when / come
10 the top and climbed up on the dock,
there was that pe>ky canoe settin' right
there on the water. lOokin' right at me,
a inherent as a sheep, and not drop
OF water IN it.
! 1T gh" grunted big. strappin
Iniun. " hite man catch fish like otter
''And then the pesky rascals COM
menced a-laffin' As if twas funny. In
the somewhat exciting incidents of the
next ten minutes | was quite brIsily en-
| gagged. When the excitement was over
4 couple of us was purity near used up.
and that consait I'd brought all the way
from York State was deader'n 4 mallet.
| hain't been half as smart sence IS /
was afore. Detroit Free Press.