davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1885-01-15
Ayers Sarsaparilla

for Rheumatism, with entire success and,
after careful observation, declares that, IN
his belief. there Is no medicine In tile world
equal to II for the cure of Liver Disorders,
Gout, tho effects of high living. Salt
Rhoum, Sores, Eruptions, and oil tho
various forms of blood tlisenscs.
We have Mr.. LELASD's permission to invite
oil who may desire further evidence in regard
to tho extraordinary curative powers Of
AYERS SAnsAPARILLh to SEQ lin rersoli-
ally either Mt his mammoth Ocean Hotel,
Long Branch, or at the popular I.cand llote',
Broadway, 9th and 2Sth Streets, New York.
Mr.. LELAND's extensive knowledge Of Ito
good done by this unequa1Ied eradicator of
blood poisons enables him to give inquirers
much valuable information.
PREPARED BY
Or. &c. Ayer& Co., Lowell, Mass.
Sold by all Druggists; 81. six bottles for es.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

--"Papa's pants will soon fit brother"
is the first line of anew song, and yet it
is said that there is no literary or mu-
si6al genius in this country.
p. ia Call.
"A Georgia negro after living nine
ty-five years of single happiness, fell heir
to small fortune and has been married.
Some men never can stand prosperity.
M Y. Graphic.
factions speak louder than words" "
said the blacksmith, suiting the action
to the word by hammering so violently
on his anvil that the book agent who
was bothering him turned of his gas
Boston Globe.
Swift wrote: "There never appear
more than five or six men of genius in
an age" "Now you understand. said
Brown, ''why L am so sad. Solitude
viii be the death Of me, / fear" !" Even
solitude - observed Fogg. "has its COM
pensations. ."-BoStop Transcript.
The Prime of Wales son is coming
to this country. The American women
who quarrelled about dancing with Al
bert Edward while he was making
tour of this country, quarter of cen
tury ago, are now grand-excuse US,
plump and pleasing matrons.-M Y
Herald.
Canned goat is not generally in de-
mand at American hotels and restau-
rants, but in Mexico there is no preju-
dice against straight-haired mutton, and
the new industry may find patrons in
the neighboring republic. When Texas
butchers sell the meat of goats they
generally call it mutton.-G Galveston
lTer. Meas.
Pm dreadfully tired all the time,
doctor; what do you recommend?" '.As
your disease appears to be constitu-
tional, perhaps little iron will suit
your case How shall / take it,
doctor?" Wen, as your circulation
needs to be improved, the fiat-iron form
would doubtless be the best. IN Y.
Graphic.
"A rich young man was courting a
poor young girl, but he was slow in
bringing matters to a crisis. So one
day she complained of the hardships of
being poor. .'Poorl'' he exclaimed
SdldnIly1 young iauy Win your
wealth of mind and grace of person
poorp Why, such charms as you
possess are worth a mint of money. !"
"WelL | wish had the mint and some
body else had the charms,n she said,
and the crisis came.-N y. Mercury.
The lady of the house was a hand
some woman of mature order oi
beauty, and when she had completed
her toilet she gazed fondly at herself in
the glass. and remarked to her new
maid: ''You'd give good deal to be al
good-looking as / am. wouldn't you
now? " "Yes'm; almost as much a
you would give to be as young as am. :
1t is not believed that this epigrammatit
young woman viii be chosen again al
the expiration of her present term
Life.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
SCHOOL AND CHURCH.

Rev. William Dean, D. D., Baptist
missionary for fifty years to the Chinese
OF Bangkok, Siam, now at the age of
seventy-seven, has arrived in this coun-
try, where he will spend the remainder
of his days.
AT this day and age we need more
carpenter schoolmasters, less of tech
nology. A knowledge of mechanics and
mechanical movements is of more use,
as well as ornament in business train
ing than an intimate knowledge of the
definite article or Greek verb.-South-
ern Trade Gazette.
1t is estimated that there are 200.
600, 600 Mohammedans in the world, of
whom 100000 are in Southeastern
Europe and 100000 in Asiatic Tur-
key, 7,500,0 1000 in Persia, $4,000, 900 in
Arabia and Central Asia and 1000, 900
in Hindostan. Considerably more than
half Of them are in Asia, and the re-
mainder in Africa, except the 5000, 900
in European Turkey Chicago Tribune.
NO State in the Union surpasses
Texas in the munifcence with which it
is caring for its public schools. The
buildings in the larger towns are equal
to any in the United States, and liberal
salaries are paid the teachers The State
University has permanent fund of over
half million dollars, and also two mil
lion acres of land. Its total resources
are estimated by the Regents to amount
to five million dollars. The State has
also set apart thirty million acres OF
land to provide for general education
N. r independent.
The Bowdoin Orient contains a
communication proposing that an Al
umni Memorial Day be set apart to be
observed in honor of Bowdoin's illustri-
GUS graduates. Such a proposal ought
to meet with universal approval. The
class of '25, with Longfellow and Haw-
thorne, takes the lead in respect to Illus
trious graduates, and there are others
also memorable. Jacob Abbott, whose
life and fame were connected with
Pennington, graduated in 1920; William
Pitt Fessenden in 1928, and Franklin
Pierce in 1924. All these names occur
within period of six years.-PorttGild
(Me.l Press.
Rev. j. B. Wasson, discussing in
the Independent some new theories in
education, favors industrial education.
Among his reasons therefor, is one to
the effect that such education is a pre-
;ventive of crime. He states the records
OF one of the Pennsylvania penitentia.
ries show that of LOLA prisoners, only
seven were mechanics, and he also sub
mits some English statistics of like
character in further corroboration. A
deduction from Mr.. Wasson's paper
accordingly. is that the more working
men we have in the land, the better Ii
is for the general peace and good order.
The very triteness of the conclusion
commends his theory. Current.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
Made Himself Felt.

When well-known member of this
community, now dead, was State SEN
ator from this city, he was engaged in
some very radical measures which sorely
cut into many people whom he thought
were in need of reform. They abused
him very thoroughly, but in his honesty
he maintained the fight strongly. A
friend of his from the city visited him
in Sacramento while the measures were
pending.
'Well, what do they say of me in San
Franeisco?n
They don't speak very well of you"
''What do they say about me? That 5
what want to know"
'Well, they say very rough things
about yolt. / don't care to"
Speak it out Tell me how they
talk
; They call you liar, scoundrel, a
thief. an ignoramus, an idiot every
thing they can think of that is bad
''Ah, said the Senator, rubbing his
hands in glee and chuckiing in perfect
enjoyment, '.they. feel me, my boy, they
feel meW-San Francisco Chronicle.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
4" SHALL !? &"

Shall do this, sir, and shall do that, sir?
Shall go in, sir, or shall go out?
Shall il be bonnet or shall it be hat sir?
State your opinion; I'm sadly in doubt.
Shall go riding, or shall go walking?
Shall accept it, or shall refuse?
Shall be silent, or shall / keep talking?
Give your advice, pray; / can not well
choose.
Thus do we pander to others opinions
Wearing the garb of Societys slaves;
Fashions tyrant, and we are her minions,
Robbing our life of the freedom it Graves,
Ought to visit her, ought to cut her?
Shall be friendly, or shall be cold?
Shall look boldly, or peep through the
shutter?
Shall give silver, or shall give gold?
What will be said if | stay from the dinner:
What will be said If I'm seen at the ball?
Will they proclaim me saint or a sinner?
If not the former, go not at all.
Thus do we pander to others opinions
Wearing the garb of Societys slaves;
Fashions tyrant, and we are her minions,
Robbing our life of the freedom it Graves
Why not go forward, undaunted, unfearing,
Doing the thing that is lawful and right?
Caring not who may be seeing or hearing
Stunning the darkness, and counting the
light
Surely, if conscience forbear to upbraid us.
Well may we laugh at the verdict of fools;
God is our guide--for His service He made
US
Not to be ruled by the makers of rules.
Pander no longer to others opnions;
Wear not the garb of Society's slaves;
Be not of Fashion the pitiful mnions;
Rob not your life of the freedom it Graves.
-Ndnnie Potger O'Donoghtte, in Chambers
Journal.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
GENERAL MCCLELLAN.

How Little Mae Disposed of a RecaIcitrant
Ouartermaster.
General Mcclellan was indefatigable
in reorganizing the army routed at Bull
Run, and he used every day to ride or
walk through the camps about Wash
ington in citizens dress, looking out for
abuses to be remedied One day as he
was strolling through the rear of a regi-
mental encampment, he saw pail of
some dark-looking mixture standing by
a fire, and asked what it was. '.It's
Coffee" said the soldier who was
officiating as cook. ITO me,n replied
Mcclellan, sit looks more like slops.n
80" said the soldier, sit is not fit to
drink, but we have to put up with it,
and our other food is not bit better"
t'Well, whose fault is it?'' he asked.
so, our quartermaster is drunk most of
the time, and when he is not he is
studying how to cheat. y Mcclellan
passed on, and seeing more evidence of
the dirty and slovenly manner in which
the quartermaster conducted the opera
tions in his tent, he accosted him with
the remark that the men were COM
planning of bad treatment from him.
The quartermaster flew into a passion,
and swore it was none of his business,
and he had better not come sneaking
around trying to make mischief. Nc
Clellan answered him, telling him he
had better be cautious how he talked.
Quartermaster replied: ''Who are you.
that you assume so much apparent au-
tborityph AZ am Georpe r. sNcClnIlan
and you can pack up your traps and
leave" The quartermaster was struck
dumb. and Mcclellan turned and left
him. That evening the quartermaster
left, to the tune of the Rogue March, +"
played by some of the boys who had
got wind of it.-Be1a. PerLeu Poore. -
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
A LATE DISCOVERY.

The Iilinoisian Who Was Millionaire
and Didn't Know 1t.
I met him on Canal Street, New Or
leans, or rather he came up to me as i
was leaning against a door-post and
asked:
BE you from Ilanoy?"
''No-Michigan."
That's too bad. 1 wanted to find
somebody from nlanoy."
"Broke?'
mo, notyet. See here, I'm pizenly
bothered"
"Well?"
"Well, I've been hired man in lila
noy for the last thirteen years, gettin'
about $16 a month and board I've
allus looked upon board as wuth about
dollar week, but
"Well?"
Il just kinder filled up back here at
the restaurant about half a square
meal-just 'nuff to pitch hay or hoe corn
on for an hour, and what dye 'spose
the fgger wasp
80, about seventy cents.''
Seventy pumpkins! 1t was $3.50, Or
I'm sinner. Sayp'
''Yes."
That's $500 day for fodder, OF
about 800 month. A hundred a
month is twelve hundred year. Thir-
teen times that is about $4,000.
~ ''Yes. y os-7
Say, I'll be gosh-baked and forever
stepped on if [ haven't been one ofthese
burned aristocrats-a bloated bond
holder-a gosh-fired monopolist all these
thirteen years without knowing it,
Tucked away $15, 900 worth of fodder!
Wooshi but [ want to meet somebody
from Illanoy and pint the finger OF
financial independence at himrf-De-
trOit Free Press. ~ a
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
Seventh Infantry, the horse went to thas

oeVentn infantry, the horse went to that
regiment.
Poor fellow, he seemed glad enough
to be in captivity, and was soon quite
gentle, but they were afraid to ride him
lest he should throw his rider and again
escape to the hills. He would put down
his head to have the sore on his neck
washed, and, indeed, behaved so well
we soon ceased to talk about him.
Not very long after his capture de-
tachment of Captain Phisterer's COM
pany was going in to Fort Bridger, and
the Captain determined to send the
wild horse in with them. He was
securely tied behind wagon and strict
orders given to guard him night and
day until his arrival at Bridger
On the second day out we heard from
the detachment that the horse had es-
capped. 1t appeared soldier had taken
him down to the water, using merely a
halter. Whether the horse got
frightened and pulled away, or whether
the soldier for moment dropped the
halter-strap, no one could tell, but the
horse got away, fled into the hills, and,
OF course, pursuit was useless. He was
often seen afterward, but no one ever
could succeed in recapturing him.
The events of which l have been
writing occurred in 1869, nearly sixteen
years ago, and the horse is probably
dead before this time, as he was thought
to be eight or ten years old when we
captured him, but doubt not some of
the descendants of this horse now roam
over Northern Wyoming, and it is prob
able not few of them annoy the cattle
men and horse-growers by stealing
their mares. If the descendants are as
good stuff as the sire they will not
easily be got rid of, and a good many of
them, as we'll as us, will have cause
long to remember our first experience
in catching wild horse.-Gen. James
BriSbtn, IN Chicago HorsenGn.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
BARBERS.


How They Appear to Customer, Abb
i stractly and Concretely.
incidentally we love barber We
do not object to his conversation
deed, we admire to listen to his artless
prattle as he whips the thin steel deftly
around our jugular. Neither are we Of
that class of cynics who rail at the bar
ber's foibles his absolute certainty of
nipping a favorite pimple, his feverish
anxiety to annoint our head with oil
that shall run down upon our .coat-col-
lar, to its undoubted detriment, his per-
sistepce in giving our face final fiirt
with the towel that shall hopelessly dis
arrange the smustache he has with so
great exactness just carefully adjusted
all these shortcomings and more we can
forgive; but we do wish he would not 50
studiously avoid the spot upon our head
or face that the light touching of his
hands has set to itching. When the
barber combs our hair, if there be one
spot of all the broad expanse of head
that would be,grateful to the soothing
touch of comb or brush, there is some
thing supernatural in the manner with
which the barber avoids it Similarly
with the face. When the bay rum is
filling our nose with cheerful odor and
our eyes with tears. and the barber
throws over us. the glamor of the drying
towel, is there not always an aggrava-
ting spot adjacent to the nose that his
swiftly-fying hands utterly fail to reach?
With all our love for the barber, there
are times and occasions when he mad
dens us-R0cEln1ad Courier Gazette.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
With the progress of science. MANY

q WItH tIIe progress OF sclence, many
believe that the photograph will yet be
SO perfected as to reproduce every OBJ
ject on the surface OF the moon, thus
enabling the inhabitants OF tf1is world
to form a correct estimate of the life
conditions existing on our satellite 240,-
600 miles distant from us.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09

q An Indiana man has patented
model for a straw house. The walls are
to be made ofbales ofstraw or hay. and
then plastered and bolted down. 1t is
said to be preferable to brick and as en-
durable. = Indianax0its Journal.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09

"A grandfather. son and grandson
were rounded up by the authorities in.
their descent upon Cherokee gam bling
dive. .-DenUer Tribune.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09

The moment people begin to be-
heve in themselves and their own ca
pacity to develop their own resources
according to occasion, outsiders see at
a glance that that is the place to put
money, for their prosperity win steadily
advance CoistaaJ5d Is. C.1 Register
The University of Virginia has no
prescribed course of study, no entrance
examination, no vacation except the
summer one, and but six holidays.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09

Harvard students are to be free to
60 to church or not. as they please, by
a recent decision OF the board Of over
seers.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-04-09
Broadside.

In newspaper parlance, to constitute a
broadside. the matter should be printed
on the entire sheet, on one side of the
paper only, not in columns, but in one
measure. 1t matters not which way of
the paper the printing is displayed, or
what the size of the type, provided the
whole is presented to the eye in one
view. Although the entire matter of a
broadside must be contained on one
side of a sheet Of paper, an Endorsement
may be allowed. The custom of firing
newspaper broadsides prevails in En-
gland, but in the United States the
ordinary column width furnishes ample
space for the abuse or criticism of CO.
temporaries.--jSt. LOUIS Globe Demo
cTdt.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-10-30
READ! THINK! ACT !
PalmaSOla, Florida.

The paradise OF nvalds The home of trop-
ical fruits! Climate unsurpassed. No frost
No extremes OF heat or cold No malaria!
Ground high and dry! Plenty of pine! and the
hnest hunting and fishing in America.
PALMA SOFIA has the name OF being the
largest, prettie-t and youngest town in Florida,
IL beautifully located on the Gulf Coast, iva
miles above the m ,uth Of the Manatco River.
Already the iron horse is vending its way TO
Palma Sofa, and soon the tourist viii arrive ut
ts first class hotel, where he Gun get n meal to
suit his epcurean tastes.
Palma sofia POSSESSES tho largest store in
Southern tlordn, with sawmill, furniture man
ufactory, packing houses, warehouses, churches,
school houses pOStOtliCo, stores, beautiful resi-
dences and large wharf at which ocean steam g.,
ers arrive daily from Tampa.
WARREN LELAND, DR., OF "LOng
Branch" fame, has secured u location at Pal
ma sofia for the erection of n winter resort. The
prediction is safe one, based rs it Is upon the
natural advantages and attractions of the
place, that he will make this the LONG
BRANCH" Of FLORIDA, and other large
hotels will be built.
With the completion OF the railroad. this will
be the terminus, and the direct route TO lIa-
yana, Cuba. Lots will double and quadruplr
their present prices. Now Is the time to buy.
LOTS 1OON3cO #, $t5 to 5000 per lot.
We want PALMA SOFA to keep booming, aud
as an inducemcnt To the public, and u thor
0ughly advertise I'll bcaat ful place, WE WILL
GIVE AWAY u LIMITED number ONLY OF our
lots, giving lots ALTERNATELY as they come
CORNERS eNceptedl charging applicants the cN-
pense OF deed, transfer, etc, which will not cN-
coed S2.O. Applicants can send postal money
order with application To insure promptnesl.
otherwise deeds will be sent G.. q, u. Appli-
canls must not be surprised NJ the return 81
their money, as being LIMITED the first come
VIII he ilrst served. Title perfect. Full
warranty deed.
send for pamphlet Address,
PALMA SOLA LAND COMPANY,
81 South William St., New York, n. Y.
REFERENCEs:-
B.S.llennlng, Esq. Prcst Fla. Il h. aud Nav. Co.
ll.B.Plant, Esq, Prcst. Southern Express Co.
Postmaster, Palma sofia, Florida.
John 5. Beach, Esq, prcst Prairie City Bank,
Terra Hautc, lnd.
Jas. Z. McIregur, ESQ., Capitalist, Cincinna.
Il, Ohio.
Henry S; Hubbard, ESD, Cashier Columbia
Bank, y. Y, NY.
VIM. Drysdalc, Esq, New York Times, New
York, and host OF others.
Oct 30
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-10-30
Trough on Rats"
Clears out rats, mice, reaches, flies ants, bed.
buVa

Trough on Rats"
Clears out rats, mice, reaches, flies ants. bed.
bugs.
Heart Pains.
Palpltation, Dropsical Swellings, Dizziness
Indigestion, Headache, Sleeplessness cured by
"Wells' Health Remover"
Trough on COrns."
Ask for Wells Trough on Corns." l5c. Quick
complete cure. Hard or soft corns, warts
bunions.
"Buohu-Paiba."
Quick, complete cure, all Kidney, Bladder
and Urinary Diseases, Scalding, Irritation
Stone, Gravel, Catarrh of the Bladder. 81
Druggists.
Bed-Bugs, Flies.
Flies, roaches, ants, bedbugs, rats. mice
gophers, chipmunks, Cleared out by though
on RATS" l5c. II
Thin People.
''Wels' Health Renewer'' restores health and
yigor, cures Dyspepsia, Impotence, Sexual DE.
bllity. 81.
"Rough on Pain"
Cures cholera, collie, cramps, diarrhea, aches
pains, sprains, headache, neuralgia, rheuma-
tism. zoe. Rough on Pain Plasters, I5c.
N..t. Mothers.
II you are failing, broken, worn out and
nervous, use "Wells' Health REVIEWER" ST.
Druggists.
t- Life Preserver.
u you are losing your grip on life, try
wells Health Remover" Goes direct "a
weak spots. tr r.
"Rough ON Piles"
Cures Piles or IIemorrhoids, Itching, Protrud.
ing Bleeding, Internal or other. Internal and
External Remedy In each package. Sure cure
Soc. Druggists.
Pretty Women.
Ladies who would retain freshness and vi.
vaclty, don't fail to try "Wells' Health Renew
en-"
Trough on Itch"
"ROugh on Itch" cures humors, eruptions,
rlngworm, letter. salt rheum, frosted feet, chill
blains, .r.
"Itough on Catarrh."
Corrcots offensive odors at once. Complete
cure OF worst chronic cases, also unequal az
gargle for Dipthena, Sore Throat, Foul Breath
5Oc.
The Hope of tho Nation.
Children. slow in development, pnny.
scrawny and delic tie, use "Wells' Health Re-
newer"
Catarrh of the Bladder.
Singing, Irritation, Inflammation, all Kidney
and Urinary complaints, cured by "Buchu-
Palba." 81.
water bugs, Reaches"
"ROugh on Rats' clears them out, also Bee
ties, Ants.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-10-30
THE BALKAN PENINSULA AS IT Is NOW

THE BALKAN PENINSULA AS IT Is NOW.
They parceled out the peninsula
this way and that. Servia, Roumalia
and Bulgaria, all ancient dominions
ofthe Turk, were erected into prov
inces to themselves. Bulgaria was
tributary to the Turk. Between Bull
garia. and Constantinople the little
province of Eastern Roumelia was
established. twas meant for safe
guard between Turkey and Russia, t.
sort of neutral ground, as it were.
Eastern Roumelia at the same time
was semi-independent province.
The sultan appointed the governor,
though the little state was supposed
TO govern itself. Its subsection to
Turkey consisted chiefly in its paying
taxes to the porte, tolerably stifftaxes,
too. Philippopolis is the capital.
That was in 1878. All went smooth
ly as far as outside knowledge went,
till suddenly, OH the 18th of this Sep
TENDER, without word of warning,
the inhabitants of Philippopolis rose
and proclaimed that they 10 longer
belong TO Turkey, but to Bulgaria.
They seized the Turkish governor
and officers and imprisoned them.
Then they put their own men in the
places of these, and provisional gov
eminent was formed. 1t and the
ltoumeian soldiers swore allegiance
TO Prince Alexander, of Bulgaria, OIL
the spot.
That was all there was of it. A
revolution that may shake the thrones
of Europe before it is done with was
accomplished without drop ofblood-
shed.
Prince Alexander of Bulgaria ac-
cepted the plucky little state thus
made present to him, in manner
80 cool and quiet as to hint that he
knew all about it beforehand. lie
appointed at once NJ. Strausky, gov
eruor of the province, and himself
proceeded to Philippopolis at his
leisure.