davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
The Tobacco Woman.

Five cents worth of snuff" said lit.
tie woman as she bent overthe ecounter Oi
drug store Tins morning and whispered
the order in the clerks ear with mys-
terious mien. Glapcing furtivelr around
to assure herself that there were no w.t.
nesses TO the transaction, she added:
"It's for another lady. never use the
horrid stuff" Picking up a neatly
wrapped little bundlc in white paper,
s e placed it TO her nose to assure her.
self that it was the genuine article, then
flunr down a nickel and hurriedly lett
the store.
"Here, Johnny" said the clerk, turn
ing to a boy who was standing behind
the prescription case in conversation
with reporter Of this paper, put up
some more snuff. All those packages
we put up last night are gone already.
hurry! Here's another customer com.
inc across the street. From the way
she stares through the door judge she
wants snuff. All, this is rushing b1si-
nessr" he continued, aside to the report
er, who let fall his under jaw in utter
amazement.
who are your chief patrons in this
liner" ventured the reporter.
"Why, the ladies, of course: We have
no male callers for snuff at al. The men
chew tobacco instead. Of course no
woman buys the snuff for herself. The
purchase is always maze fora reighbor
or friend. l have seen women come
here with the brown juice dry in the
corners of their mouths, and complain
of the dirty stuff, which they said they
were buying for another woman. The
habit, / understand, is very fascinating,
and when once learned is more binding
than either chewing tobacco or smoking.
In its strength to ensalve the will it ap-
proaches the power of narcotics. Louis
vile Evening Post.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
1T CHANGED HER MIND.
Various Views Of the Situation to be
Taken Before an EIopement.

Taken Before an ElOpement.
He looked all around to see if any
body was within hearing, and then drop
ped his voice to whisper and said:
"Boss, / reckon you kin gin me leetle
informashur: What does pussOn do
when he elopes?"
"Why, an elopement is when a man
and woman or boy and girl run away to-
getheE"
"Whar do dey 60 to-"
"Oh, anywhere they decide upon"
"Who pays de expenses"
"The man, of course"
"How long am dey gomez"
Sometimes a week-sometimes for
ever"
"Who pays de expenses back?"
The man."
"What becomes of de woman's hus-
band?"
"Well, he generally arms himself with
shotgun, and if he overhauls the
couple he shoots seven kinds of day.
light through the man and forgives his
wife and take her home"
"Fo' de Lawd! Shoots right at YEP"
"Yes."
"Doan' gin we no time to run or re-
pent, an can't he bought off wild a sill
yer watch and So"
mo, sir"
"Now! say?"
"Well?"
81 isn't gwine! rze changed my
mind Good-day! !" De:roit Free
Press.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
TERMS: $500 PER YEAR
TIMELY HINTS TO GIRLS
Some of the Things they should do
Without CompIainiu"

| III girls who have IOred over tho
pays of tie little book called Don't"
are now invited by an exchange 10 -ac.
eept Inc advice in regard TO things they
should do.
Do be natural; a poor diamond is let
ter than 4 good imitation.
Do try to be accurate. not only ioryour
own sake, but for the sake of Your sex;
the lncIpacitv of the female mind for
accrr9cv Is 4 standard ar-umcnt against
The equality Of the st xrS.
Do be exact ir money matter every
debt you incur means loss TO some one,
probably to some one less alle than. you
to bear it.
DO answer your letters soon after they
aIe received and do try to reply to them
with some relation to their contents: a
rambling, ill-consdercd letter is satire
upon your education.
Do, when you talk, keep your hands
still.
Do observe; the faculty of observation,
well cultivated, axes practical men
and women.
Do attach as much importance to your
mind as 70 your body.
Do try to remember where YOU put
Your gloves and card case; keepthe form.
er mended and the latter tilled.
Do recOllect that your health is more
important than your amusement; YOU
con live without one, but you Will die
early without the other.
Do try 10 be sensible; it is not partic-
ular sign of superiority to talk like fool.
Do put your haifpins in so that they
will stay; it looks slovenlv. to say the
the least, to see them half dropping out.
Do be ready in time fer church; ifyou
do not respect yourself sufficiently to be
punctual, respect the feelings of other
people.
Do get up in time for breakfast.
Do avoid causes of irritation in your
family circle; do not reflect that home is
the place in which to be disagreeable.
Do be reticent; the world at large has
no interest in your private afflirs.
Do cultivate the habit of listening to
others; it will make you an invaluable
member of society, to say nothing of the
advantage it will be to you when YOU
marry; every man likes to talk abort
himself; good listener makes delight
full wife.
Do be contented; martyrs" are de-
testable; cheerful, happy spirit is in
fectious; you can carry it about with YOU
like sunny atmosphere.
Do avoid whis. erin@; it is rs bad as
"iegirg; both ale to be conGemned; there
is 40 excuse for either one of them; if
you have. anything to say. say il: if yeu
have not, hold yOuI tongue altogether;
silence is golden.
Do b truthful; 60 avoid cxag g.era;i0n;
If you mean 4 mile say mile, not mile
aud half; if you mean one say one, not
a dozen.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
THE LATEST FOLLY.
bleeding to Secure CoIOrIess CONF
plexiOn.

Bleeding is becoming fashionable
among young society swells of both sexes,
but il is mostly practiced by young men,"
said society physician yesterday.
by bleeding persons naturally become
a little pale, and this gives them kind
of aristocrItic appearance. For instance,
if a young man has been rejected by the
young lady who has upset his reason he
can play upon her sympathics by having
himself ble6. The loss of blood would
make him pale and interesting, and he
could lounge around home for few days
and send out a report that he was dying
of broken heart. His paleness would
show that something was the matter
with him, and it might excite the lady's
sympathy, if she had that element in
her fashionable composition. The face
coul not be powdered or painted to re-
present illnegs. The ladies understand
this artifice too well, and great many
are adopting the bleeding process. 1t is
not that they wish to convey the impress
sion they are dying by inches from grief.
They don't do that now, but occasional
bleeding makes them naturally pale, and
their pretty faces are more easily color
ed IN consequence. With white back
ground, or rather face, the face is colored
without the prelin mary trouble of wash
ing it with white compound before
coloring is put on. The colOrs stick
better, the paint does not show so plain
ly, does not close the pores Of the skin so
Theoretically; smoother appearance
generally.
Then, again, it is not the correct thing
in fashionable society to appear too rosy
and healthful 1t would look ss if they
followed some occupation for living.
School girls, you know eat pickles and
slate pencils under the impression that
il will make them thin by drying up the
blood. Bleaching is the latest device in
fashionable society, and is resorted to by
both sexes for opposite purposes. Dur
ing the summer ladies are bleached, or
nled, under the impression that the re-
duction of blood prevents an excess of
perspiration and nothing is considered
more Questionable than to perspire.
That is why so many ladies look 80 cool
and icy chilling in the red hot months
of summer. / do not know that the
young men drink salt water afler being
bled like the ethereal that are bleach
ed for the market by cruel butchers, but
no doubt salt water will soon become a
fashionable craze in connection with the
bleeding process n. Y. Times.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
SOMEBODY UNDER THE BED.
What Two Smart People Thought
Was a Pet Dog.

Sam V. Harris lives in Forth Worth.
Neither he nor his wife are very smart,
as will be seen by the following incl
dent: Last night Sam heard noise un-
der his bed.
"There is somebody under the bed,'
said Sam 10 bis wife.
Its Fido; guess
mo, think it's burglar" replied
Sam.
Just reach your hand dow n and if it
is FIdo he will tick it,
The burglar, for it was one after AL,
overheard the conversation, and when
Sam reached his hand down the burglar
licked it all over affectionately. This
was entirely satisfactory, and they both
went to sleep, but when they woke up
the next morning there was not much
left in the house that was worth carry.
ing of. Texas S;ltings.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

A sudden freak seized the police de
partment few nights ago, and twelve
fashionable, hign toned" gambling dens
were raided. The police are taken with
such spasms of virtue enthusiastically.
By some mysterious atmospheric or
electric phenomenon the gamblers. most
of them, knew that the guardians of the
law were coming, and. only two arrests
were made. But heaps of costly LAY
outs" and gambling implements were
seized and cArted to police headquarters,
where they were stored for their owners
to come and claim their property. No
one came. 1t is said with much show of
reason that the raid was made to dis
credit old Superintendent Walling. 1t
was done without his knowledge by or
der of the police commissioners. Wall
ing had said often that there was not a
gambling den open m New York. He
is getting old and the politicians want
his place So. it was hinted. the rad
was made to show that the old man neg
lected his duty.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

The elopement business is going so far
in this region that fathers of attractive
daughters are beginning to ask them
selves whether ere long they will not
be approached by ardent suitors in the
manner portrayed in the cut. Gus o
Rudolpby, son of the city surveyor, low
ed Addie Stiger, daughter of the presi.
dent of the Acme Water Company. Old
Stiger didn't like the match, because he
said his family was American and he
didn't want any foreigner to become a
member of it. Then ne didn't like the
idea of Gus and Addie goirg to the Lied
erkranz balls, as they did. One day the
old gentleman went out of town, and
when he came back the next day found
bis dauy yhter gone and with her grand
piano and lot of furniture and things
that had been willed to her by her moth
er. There was brief note from Addie
saying that she and Gus were married
and asking old Stiger to call on them at
their new home. He forgave them.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

The gas consumers of the city in the
early part of the winter thought that
thcy would be happy in reduced bills,
for most of the large gas companies were
consolidated and sent around notices of
big reduction in the price of gas per
foot. Have the bills been lower? Not
very much; they have been higher.
WHAT has done it? The little demon
that turks in the deceptive gas meter.
Consumers, large and small, have seen
the figures on the meter dials so up
month by mouth, and the figures on the
bill 60 up at the same rate. The com.
panies are sly. They reduce the rate and
then they put on extra pressure at the
gas works and make the consumers burn
enough more gas than formerly to push
the bills up beyond the good old days of
high prices
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

Mr.. Vose was a lucky young man who
inherited a million dollars. He no
sooner got the money than he proceed
ed to run through it at 2:l0 gait. He
tried all the frivoiities and designations
that New York could afford. and then
he joUrneyed into France and took up
the run again in Paris. There he found
the Jardin Mabille, the ''ladies Of the
ballet" the faces and innumerable cost
ly things, and men and woman TO help
him in his efforts. He scored a great
success, and the other day turned up in
police court here charged with forgery
and obtaining money by false Ieprcsen-
t,tion. His chief victim vas the pro-
priCtpr Of tie big Turkish bath estab.
lishment in Lafayette place. He could
nj give Up his wild life after his money
gave out, and he lived for a considerable
time in his swindling operations. When
he found that there was no escape from
pris on bars he remarked: We'll have
had enough fun, so far to make up for a
few years in cell"
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
MY VALENTINE.
W. T. PETERS.

He came one clustering, snowy day
In February weather;
He carried On his diInpled arm
A portmanteau OF leather.
He tapped against my window-pane;
He said: "You sly old fellow,
Come tell me of that little maid
With curly head and yellow.
"The music of whose broken speech
A happy home rejoices;
Whose prattle has sweeter sound
Than other peoples voices.
look amazed. the saucy boy
Looked back at me with laughter.
He said: my name Is Cupid
And your Valentine I'm after"
st. Nicholas
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
THE FLIGHT FROM THE CONVENT
THEODORE TILTOS

THEODORE TILToS
lace the starlights quiver
Jksfewols in the river;
The bank is hid with edge;
What If ] 81 p the edge!
I thought knew tho way
nv night as well as day;
How soOn a lover goes astray.
The place Is somewhat lonely
mean for Just one only,
Ibr1u, hi the boat ashore
Anhour ago or more.
Well | will SIT AMI wait;
She fixed the hour at eight;
Good angels bring her not late!
Tomorrow g tongues that name her
Will hardly dare to blame her;
iily still Is white
through all the dark of night.
The morning sun shall snow
The bride rs pure as snow,
Whose wedding all the world shall know
O God that should gain her!
But what can SO detain herr
Hist. yelpng cur; thy bark
Will fright ner in the dark.
What! striking miner That 8 fast,
Is some one walking past2
oh, so thou art come at lastI
Now. why thy long delsying7
Alack! thy beads and praying?
IL thou, a saint, doth hope
To kneel and kiss the Pope,
Then i, "A sinner, know
Where sweeter kisses grow
Nay, now, just one before we go!
Nay twice. and, by St. Peter,
The second was he swe9ter!.
Quick, now, and in the boat!
Goodbye, old tower and moat,
May mldew from the sky
Drop blindness on the eye
That turks to watch our going by!
oh, sanity maid. told thee
No convent wall should hold thee,
Look Wonder comes the moon;
We started not too soon.
SEE how we pass that mill.
What. is the night so chill?
Then must fold thee closer still.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
MOSTLY LIES.

Said Jones: ~ hardly ever ride,
For crowded cars / can't abide,
And carriages do despise-
am so fond of exercise"
sI bring my my LUNCH" said Smith elate,
"For noisy restaurants hate;
Besides I'd spoil my appetite
For dinner when I'm home at night"
Said Brown: I'm tough: never wear
An overcoat. do declare
! do not feel the cold like those
Half-frozen chaps weighed down with
clothes
81 never touch cigars" Green spoke.
They're made OF stuff unit to smoke;
For healthfuness or comfort ripe
Give me my frsgrantbrie pipe"
And so we all apologize
And make eXcuses-mostly lies,
Because we dare not say with sense
We go without 10 save expense.
Chicago Sun.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

A Mormon editor of Salt Lake City
had the following in recent issue of his
paper: "The unknown woman who was
killed at this place about three months
ago by the cars proves to be one of the
wives of the editor of this paper" A
new count appears to have revealed the
fact.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

Protection is 10 laboring man es
foolish thing as it would be for him to
keep his mother-in-law in the house to
protect him from his wife. Fall River
Advance.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
GIVEN AND TAKEN.
]. @. WHITTIER.


Smoothing soft the nesting head
OF q maiden faucy-led,
Thus grave-eyed woman said:
Richest gifts are those we make:
Dearer than the love we take
That we give for loves own sake.
"well know the hearts unrest;
Mine has been the common quest,
To be loved, and therefore best.
"Favors undeserved were mine;
Al my feet as on a shrine
Love has laid its gifts divine.
sweet the offerings seemed, and yet
With the sweetness came regret,
And sense OF unpaid debt.
Heart OF mine unsatisfied,
Was II vanity or pride
That q deeper Joy denied?
"Hsnds that ope but to receive
Empty close; they only live
Richly who can richly give.
"Still," she sighed with moistening eyes,
Love is sweet In any guise;
But its best is sacrifcei
"He, who, giving, does not crave
Likest is to him who gave
Life itself the love to save.
"Love that self-forgetful gives
Sows surprise Of ripened sheaves-
Late or soon Its own receives"
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
A Pet Squirrel.

In front of the telegraph Office at
Steckbridge, Mass there is large elm
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21
ri Mahdi.

False prophet of the Soudan, upper
Egypt, whose forces recently captured
Khartoum.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

Brides now 60 to the altar with the
left hand uncovered. This means that
when the husband comes home late he
will be handled without gloves. Phila-
delphis Call.
Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1885-02-21

Roman gold coils in shape Of snake,
with diamond eyes and ruby nose"
Dick groaned aloud, but did not dare
to let word of disapprobation escape
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-07-18
A Good Duck Story.

A few days ago John Hunter, brake
man on the Pine Island railroad New
York, went out on the Waikiki river in q
dug out canoe, to try his new 800 breech.
loading shotgun On ducks. He saw a
duck and blazed away The new gun
kicked like a mule and upset the boat
Hunter disappeared beneath the water.
but came up again within reach of the
boat and seized hold of it The gun dis.
appeared and stayed there. The water
was eight feet deep. Hunter fioated about
on the capsiZed dug-out for an hour, and
hallooed for help until he got hoarse.
Then man came along, got another boat
and rowed out ard brought Mr.. Hunter
in.
The next day Hunter went out in his
dugOut with garden rake to fish for his
new gun. After dragging the bottom for
nearly half a day he got a hold of the
gun. When he fired his gun off the day
before both barrels were cooked, but only.
one went off. The hold Mr. Hunter got
on the gun with the rake must have been
on the trigger Of the cooked barrel, for
when the gun had been raised nearly to
the surface. coming up butt first, there
the next second the gun shot up out of
the water like a skyrocket 1t flashed by
Mr.. Hunters face go close that it knocked
his hat off. Mr.. Hunter jerked back and
over went the boat
AS on the DAY before, Hunter went I'M
der and came up close by the upturned
boat and seized it again. The gun re
peated its programme of disappearing and
staying there, only this time it was &C
companied by the rake. Mr.. Hunter was
compelled to exercise his lungs once more
until he was towed ashored by neighbor
Next day he hired man to 60 out and
fish for the gun and rake. The man got
them both in fifteen minutes Hunter
says he don't know whether to sell his gun
or get another kind of boat or whether
he had better lock them both up and lose
the key. The duck escaped
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-07-18
LOCAL AND GENERAL.

Mr.. L. B. Kerr has an interesting adver-
tisement in to-day's ADVERTISER.
The donolulus and Oceanics will play a
match game of baseball this afternoon at
o'clock.
The funeral of Sister Julia, of the Sacred
Hearts, took place yesterday morning. The
funeral procession was headed by Acolytes
bearing the cross and candles. These were
followed by the pupils of the school of the
Sacred Hearts, escorted by the Sisters.
Then came the Roman Catholic Clergy, the
hearse and line of private carriages. The
remains were inferred in the Roman Catho-
lie burying ground on King street.
The annual meeting of the Strangers
Friend Society took place yesterday morn
ing at the residence of Mrs. E. G. Damon.
on Beretania street. The attendance was
large. At the business meeting in the after
noon the following officers were elected for
the ensuing year: Mrs. S. C. Damon Presi-
dent Mrs. Alex. Macintosh, Vice Presi-
dent; Mrs. J. S. McGrew, Second Vice
President; Mrs. S. E. Bishop, Treasurer;
Mrs. H. N. Whitney. Secretary; Mrs Mary
Dowsett, Directress. A business meeting
will be held hereafter on the first Monday
in esch month, sud = soeiabge quarterly.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-07-18

ferred to the brigantine w G. Irwin and the rest
into the tern ]. c. Ford.
The steamer waimanalo brought 500 bags sugar
from Waimanalo July 18th. She made the round
trip within 26 hours.
The tern J. c. Ford received about 800 bags
of sugar July 18th. 600 of which were from the
steamer Waimanalo. She will be hauled along
side the steamer Planter next Monday load
sugar, and will sail the day for San Francisco.
The American tern Eva, Captain ]. o. WIKI
man, will sail next Monday in ballast for Hum
boldt Bay, California. She will be repainted to-
day.
The pile-fenders along the foot of Fort street
were reprinted with tar July 18th. New pieces Of
timber have been added to them on the weather.
side to prevent the copper being destroyed by
vessels.
The japanese steamship Yamashiro Maru
Captain ]. Mailman, returned July 18th, about
p. M, from a circuit of the islands of Maui and
Hawaii, with the royal party, their Excenencies
Aessrs- Gibson and Neumann, and the japanese
Commissioner and suite on board.
The Norwegian bark Forto, Captain A. S. Flor
enass, arrived in port early July 18th, 4s days
from Newcastle, N. S. W., with oil tons of coal
consigned to Messrs. s. G. Wilder q Co. The
Captain reports: Sailed from Newcastle, s. S. w,
tos. S. E. Thence to the 10th had variable winds,
and encountered several heavy gales. Thence to
22d experienced light southerly winds. Thence to
the 30th had winds from 8. E. to N N E., with
constant heavy rains. Thence had northeast
winds TO July 9Th. Got northeast trades in 50 N,
which lasted to the Islands. Sighted Hawaii at
noon on the 18th, al arrived off port the 18th.
The FOrto was locked near the Pacific Mail
Steamship COmpany's wharf, and will commence
discharging her coal to-day. She is wooden
bark of 700 tons register, eight years DID, and was
built at Norway. She has patent windmill,
fitted up on the main deck for pumping purposes,
which was used several times on her voyage to
this port.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-07-18
Diplomatic Argument.

Speaking of two legislative bodies as
against one there is no better illustration
than the story that is told by the great
French publicist. Laboulaye of Wash
ington and Jefferson. Jefferson was
taking tea with the father of his country,
and, having recently returned from
France, was talking of the French sys-
tenn, which has but one legislative cham
Der. Washington listened with interest to
the end, and then said:
"You have just shown the superior ad-
vantage of the two-chamber system of
legislation.
"How is that?" asked jefferson
why, you have poured your tea out of
your cup into your saucer to cool
1t is said that the argument was consid-
cred a powerful one with jefferson.