Smyrna times., 1885-06-24
Here ana Elsewhere.
Our Decoration Day Sunday.

The tramps will introduce new |
lOcusts.
The Gar of Russia will take n dose |
of Salisbury soon.
Mr.. Gladstone will know what it is
now to dynamite.
Already have General Grants doc
tors bills aggregated 100000.
Tug boat owners complain Of moth
ing to tug ut but running expenses.
We are about recovering from the
exaggerated sense Of the value of silk.
A Jerseyman paints his yacht green
and then waits for the greenies to
come.
John Randolph, of Roanoke, would
go out of his way any time to kick
sheep.
Excursions are the only loop hole
left for church people to have Il little
racket.
Gen. Phil. Sheridan takes no stock in
fighting battles over again in the news
papers.
Many rural town commissioners will
go to the sea soon to get clear of
water"
The Philadelphia Times says to the
Record: " Leave us some of the State
to manage"
Strikes continue to augment the
numbers Of the Starvation Army
everywhere.
"Sheol is a postmaster who is
hustled in. Hello" is one who is
hustled out
Big Bear has retreated into coun-
try where it is impossible for mounted
troops to follow.
Nassar College girls ate last year o.
4S5 pounds Of fresh meat and $4,000
pounds Of other things.
When a dentist gets an underhold
with his cant-hook on mans tooth
civil service is forgotten.
General Grant will enrich the Gov
ernmeEt with his presents. Swords,
medals and united country.
The mOngoose is being sent from
Jamaica to the Hawaiian Islands to rid
the latter place of rats and mice.
Ifit were not for the honesty of pur-
| pose citrate of magnesia could be easily
substituted for lemons in making lem
| Onade.
With moderation and yet not with
out some eloquence Scout Flanner
serves in the army Of the Almighty
dollar.
Twenty-Five feet Of mud cover the
hulks of dOubloons that have laid at
the bottom Of Vigo bay these cen
turies.
Once " Welcome the stranger within
your gates" and all Of the tramps fol
miles will steer for the gates Of the
bloke."
The "glistening worries" Of tn,
negro are in comparison to snow, no
white, but rather to sunshine being il
a shady place.
Now that the Tory "Jingoes " o
England have captured the Govern
meat they will try to keep clear Of tn,
Juii5ACo3 Ou NhON'
If Russia builds 1000 miles more rail
road towards the East the Gates o
India are within twelve days ioune,
of ST. Petersburg.
For the eastern passage the Whit
Star, Cunard, Inman and Anchor Line
of steamers will charge $50, an adVanc
of s. on present rates.
The revenue cutter Hamilton is a
sea cruising in the track of two yellol
fever infected vessels bound for th
Delaware capes from Cuba.
A cyclone struck moving train o
the Chicago, Milwaukee & st. Pau
Railroad, throwing every car off tn
track and smashing them to pieces.
1t is to be regretted that many of tn
: oranges of the country exist only t
beat down the farm labOrer to wage
that Cry to Heaven for vengeance.
! John Roach has cut the Whitne
t knot" The Dolphin avcrgcs il spec
Of thirteen and three-quart(
knots per hour, all that is required O
the log.
At Madrid, Spain, the sanitary of
ciais disintect the streets by kecpin
large bOntires burning, into which al
thrown quantities Of sulphur fir
quently.
Georgia will handle this season / 81
car loads Of melons, | 900 10 each c;
and Norfolk will be the way for man
of them to the North via n Y, p. &
4 Railroad.
Seven men are encamped in Il
mountains of Pennsylvania for II
purpose of receiving large quantities
gold and silver from spirits to use
J buying spirits.
The change of rules in the profc
lie sional base ball clubs in allowing Il
Il pitcher to deliver the ball as |
n pleases will result in broken linge
Dr. and bruised bodies in the batteries,
William II. Vanderbilt says that Il
elastic step, ruddy complexion M
a brilliant eyes of the mingled POI
and cabbage" eater is gone when it
} pudding, pastry and greasy messes
stead
The three-masted schooner GeOr
Il. VreeLdRd in proceeding down t
Delaware, bound for Boston, struck t
. wreck of the bark Daring, sunk
RS Duck Greek, and sustained serious
IN juries.
b An electrician ut work on the int,
,s ior of the Washington Monument, f
les few feet in one direction and hi
N himself. Had he varied it a little
IT'S would have had sheer fall down [
ou shaft of 300 feet.
he A few weeks ago the light from a bu
nninl ming ship was seen at the ChincOtcag
i'd lightship, then nothing more "
Of known until the beaches of Cedar
nj land, Matamkin and ParramOre we
N; lined with oranges, bananas, wi
no baskets and other debris of the bur
&c. ship.
RI The interminable discussions Of I
engineers over the entrance of the
- & o. r. Il. into Philadelphia hinges
! a correct datum" for n profile lin
> While one set of engineers are work.
from base line marked zero, or me
tide, at Philadelphia, another shows
E. difference of eight feet and 35-l00