The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-07-11
THE MODERN BAROUN-AL-RASCH
Adventures of the Caliph Which Were Not
Written in Letters of Gold.
Chicago Tribune.

Chicago Tribune.
Daniel" said his Excellency Grover Cleve-
land as he and his faithful Secretary sat in a
private room in the palace at Washington the
other evening, slipping glass of the forbidden
waters, ''didst eversread that charming colec-
ton of tales, The Arabian Nights Entertain
ments'p
Indeed have l, your Excellency, and been
much diverted thereby. 1t seems to me there is
wonderful resemblance between your own
career and that of Aladdin"
Quite true Daniel, although | have more
than one lamp to rub. But Aladdin is not the
person had in my minds eye. ] was thinking
of the Caliph of Bagdad, Haroun al Raschid.
who used to disguise himself and in company
with his faithful Vizier, Mesrour, roam around
the city finding out what the people thought of
him and his administration. Beshrew me, but
have an inclination to try the experiment"
ut would be we'll your EXcelency. You are
certainly the Commander of the Faithful. and /
could be your faithful Mesrour. Our adventures
could be written down in letters of gold"
DO you think any further disguise will be
necessary Danel?"
Il think it will, Commander of the Faithful.
You know we have had but one bottle"
The proper DISCUSSES were obtained and the
two sailed forth. Soon they came to four street
corners, on one OF which stood a group of Zero
cious looking, tall bearded men, who
grumbling in their boards and glowering
savagely at the opposite group, which s.com-
posed of fat, sleek. contented locking men.
Daniel, said his Excellency, pointing to the
lean looking men, what savage tribe of Indians
is thatW
THAT" said the pro tenn Mesrour, us not
tribe Of Indians. Those two bodies of men are
Missouri Democrats The lean men look leaner
because they have no Vest. They are also half
orphans, because they have pap"
And who are the men belonging to the other
two groups, with leader to each band with a
grlpsack in his handP
Those men, your Excellency are Bill
Springer Democrats and Bill Morrison Demo
Gratis. TIE two leaders will ere long take the
train for ,Phlllppi where they are to have d
meeting"
Let haste from here, Daniel; by the
beard of the Prophet like not the looks of
these men,"
Soon they came to a who was running at
the top of his speed ''Who is that, Daniel and
why does he make such haste!"
That is an offensive partisan, your EXcellen-
cy, and he goes because he must co.
And who is this villainous looking man who
goes sneaklng up the alley with q crowbar on
his shoulders"
That is an Illinos legislator, your Honor.
If he cannot get an Office he will open bank"
.'Bismallah! Daniel, knew not SO much was
going on in my capital"
Soon they came to crowd of fierce looking
men who were savagely talking to each other
Its id shame" said one, that when we
took this Northern mudsill out of his native
wallow and made him President he should growl
AT allowing us two-thirds Of the offices. Where
in sheo would he have been had it not been for
the solid South?'
True" said another "but this is what you
get by electing 200 pounds of bull beef to the
presidency"
And then they made such savage gestures
that the Caliph and his Vizier SUNK up an alley
Soon they came upon another group of excited
men, of yellow countenance, like those who live
IN an ague country, who were savagely cursing
the President. What does the Internal fool
ynno rv,x a1lk
to Illinois? Is he such an idiot to believe he
could ever carry that STATED BAH" said he, saw
agely splitting on the pavement, 'he makes me
tired. Things would have been different had
Hendricks been on the head of the ticket"
And all the rest murmured, ''Ol if IL had only
been Toni"
Then they came upon Tammany man walk
ing alone, with a map-of- Ireland countenance
and savage look. murmuring to himself, ''Bedad!
an If he thinks he can thread on the tail of the
Tammany coat, we'll make him take two steps to
one sir. Off wild i'm, wild his Hedden and his
Dorshemer" After him came Texan. saw
agely disappointed ard cursng the President
In unmeasured terms; Kansas man, damnng
the President because he could not get an office
for prohibitions sake and Kentucky man who
had asked for one for opposite purpose; men
who wanted Office because they had fought in
the confederate cause, and others VINO wanted
the same because they had tried to kill the first
fellows; and in all the crowds that hurried past
there was not one who was not damning the
President, some because he had been so fast and
Others because he too slow.
Slowly and sorrowfully the Caliph and his
Vizier returned to the palace swallowed night
cap, and prepared for bed. AS the Secretary
was retiring his Exceency called out:
Did you not say, Daniel, that the adventures
of the Caiph Haroun- al Raschid were written
down in letters of god2"
Il did, your Excellency.
We'll, want you to distinctly understand,
Daniel, that no gold goes this time"
.AD ri Oht Eycalloncx-. ~hoo La; - q