The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-11-25
The Queer Dinner.

Inc SOOu HOUSEWIVES Ol Une uelSu-
borhood often said that Mrs. Smart
ought to be the happiest woman living.
"Such nice house as she lives in! !"
said Miss Bryce, who, poor soul, taught
the district school, and boarded
around" like the scapegoat in the
Scripture wilderness.
"Such pious man as the dear dea-
con isl" added Mrs. Hopkins, whose
better-half had once been a sea-captain,
and was still apt to be profane by fits
and starts, when the cattle got into the
clover-field, and the midnight weasel
marauded on his hen-coops.
With store-carpet on the best
room floor" put in Mrs. Jones, -" and a
weekly newspaper, and white sugar in
her tea every day of her life, and a
horse and wagon to take her to church,"
Such was the opinion of society as
represented in Glen Hollow Perhaps
Mrs. Deacon Smart ,caS a happy woman,
but we are told, on the best authority,
that " the heart knoweth its own bitter
ness"
Mrs. Smart was washing up her best
china one morning, preparatory to CIV
ing grand tea-party, and her cousin,
Ella Dale, was helping her, when the
deacon put his head in at the door.
"My DEAR" said he, " here is paper
of pins for you"
Mrs. Smart nearly dropped a gilt
edged saucer in her CONSERVATION.
More pinsl " said she.
Yes, my DEAR" said the deacon
"pins are always useful"
"Oh, yes, pins!" said Mrs. Smart,
giving her glass-towel toss as she
wiped the last globule of moisture from
goblet. But not rows of rusty wire
do say for it, Ebenezer y
=" Pm going to Glen Depot, my DEAR
the deacon somewhat hurriedly inter
rupted, at this juncture; "and perhaps
l shan't be home until one O'clock"
He withdrew, and Mrs. Smart turned
to Ella Dale with half laugh.
"There, my DEAR" said she, throw
ing down the faded green roll of pin
paper on the dresser, there you be.
hold the secret Of my domestic unhappi-
ness, the skeleton in my closet!"
Ella opened her round hazel eyes.
81 can't think what you mean
Juliana," said she. You unhappy
and the deacon such truly good mani
"That's the trouble,'' said Mrs
Smart; he's too good"
81 don't see how that can be pos.
sible," protested Ella.
"And it's all at my expense" sale
Mrs. Smart, dolefully. Do you see
that paper of pins?"
"Why, of course l see it," said Ella
"Well, Mr.. Smart has bought tina
paper of pins of peddler at the door,
said Mrs. Smart. "Peddlers always come
here. This house is Mecca to tn,
race of peddlers. They know that Mr.
Smart always buys of them-he's too
good-hearted to say no; or, rather-le
us speak the truth and shame him who
shall be nameless between us-he il
too indolent to resist their importuni
ties"
Ella burst out laughing.
But what very insignificant LITTLE
trial." said she.
sob, yes, dare say!' said Mrs
Smart "The sting of hornet ism
so terrible in itself, but when who'll
swarm is let loose upon you, what then?'
A swarm?" repeated innocent Ella
My dear" said Mrs. Smart, lower
ing her voice to confidential whisper
upstairs in my bedroom closet l hav
eighteen papers of just such cheal
pins--utterly useless for anything bu
to bend themselves up double when yo
try to put them through a single thick
ness of calico, and to deprive you o
your temper just when you need
most; six cards of porcelain buttons
an article which l never use; min
packages of -blacking; thirtee
bottles of sewing-machine oil; fiv
papers of rusty needles; dozen pair
of shoe-strings, and eight rolls of tap
which is an insult to ones common
sensel If l could reconcile it to m
conscience, I'd fling the whole colle'
ton into the fire; but was brought u
to economize. What do you thin
Ella? Would it be sin?'
1t is rather problem" said Ell
Dale, soberly.
"And with all this" said Mrs. Smar
waxing vehement as she went oil
: "Ebenezer is unwilling to give m
money to buy decent darning-needl'
e and respectable tape. He wonder
3 why l can't make my dresses last
9 little longer, and thinks l am extrav
CANT in wanting new feather for n
old velvet hat. He announces that
use too many raisins and spices, an
. acEo mo Uhy I can,t raiea aUua or