The Indianapolis sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis, Ind.) 1880-1904, 1885-01-09
VARIETIES

"Can you give me a glass of water2" asked
a man as he halted in front OF the abode OF a
rural KeDtuckisn. Il reckon so. Here, you
Sol. tote byar some drlnkin' water far the
stranger. Gay, mister, what State be yer
from2'
In Germany. they call the honeymoon the
"SpsDgle week" We thought the spangls
week usually came alter the parties bad been
married long enough u give the wife some
deadliness IT ain with ths rolling Pin
Burlington Free Press
One OF the g~rsndest mankind sights is that
when The devoted wife Of the erring hus5lnd.
regardless % Whist the jeeriog world NAV
say, goes to the corner grocery with saloon
attachment and leads him home by the
ear-KeDtucky State Journal,
We'll, what did you put IN your wife's
stockirgg' ''Oh, a house and 10. and a
pony and phseton aud a lot o little gex-
gaws." OF course you speak fsuratively
when you say YOU put all these things in hsr
stocking" No, l don't, either l married
a ST. Louis girl, you SnoV-"-ChicagO News
Parson Whangdoodle Baxter distinguished
himself once more at the funeral OF an aged
cOloTed man: Our diseased brudier was
married fosh times during his life" sAid
W~hanedOodle, but only one 90 DE- WidO vs.
am so fortunate as to be able to survive him
long enough 10 be present on dis heah sol
enLio0s occasion. "-Fsxss 5 filings.
81 don't see" observed Mrs. Crap, why.
when they are giving away all them fat
Offices, tbey don't let women hold some
thing" "Tbsy would. my dear, Dat ire
women Won't do IT," answered. her hus5ard.
well should Ike 20 know, John crap,
what ihsy'l let them holG?' de took his
hal. looked IN GPp that the hall nnor vyaa
open, AID IN trembling accents m1rmursd,
Their tongues. my dear Boston Post.
Il hear you are without a preacher over
IN your congre CATION? ?" "Yes. III left two
weeks ago. Had a call at a higher salary,
/ ~presume2' Not as | know Of" Health
failed him. perhaps?" mo; his health
seemed to be good" "COogregation dida't
like his preaching, then9' Eyes, they
seemed TO-" We'll. then. he ~resigned2'
No, not exactly. Fact was, he unlosded a
lot OF railroad stock on Us at a, and the
shrinKsge, together with some tatk about tar
and feathers, took him out just as the stock
touched 52."-Wal Street News.
ST am more used to'rIdiDg horseback, and
as soon as 1 strsddled the layout ] W IS SIsh-
ing | bad a buok rein. because | expected
them 20 siifeB their znteS and 20 t. muck
iDg out they cldu'U | walked taem over TO
the Other eud OF the corral 20 gentle EN- {
Hite, end directly they Al ted OF az an easy
csritr. md se = cOGIi"g arpuud IA K rignt
through tha nerd; ard there was a dude
there with Il stiif hat Who was trying 90 cut
out a PIiitd Angus heller n "a blue dress,
al G ] fOultd. rOped both my hihd legs la
foCp skiIt, aId il had me strstche1 out
)esoN FIR brsnding QUICKEN q spring ca
csD Osw' Win bis mouth open aud his lung
stretched. Bat I got no and 90 OF again,
and Gu oDgbt 20 zen ne exercise them We
h'cits. OF course they d huck when / tried
10 hurry IN end they would rear ~ and
fail bach when [ tried 10 Sep 'em too quick;
but I'll leave il to Tie bpss beTdsr OF the
Whole lot II didn't gsilOp EN- round there
tOT thlee or iuuf hours, aud had em roll
over ard over with me. aud diIn't get me
Off.'-St Panl Day.