Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-06-19
The RDOster-Pecked Wife.

VINO ever saw Len scratching up
worms for a cock But we strongly
, suspect there is concealed under the
rural picture al attack upon some of
the Oldest institutions of society.
Do you ask. o conceited critic! what
this seeming contradiction means,
and why we should print what we so
much suspect and disapprove? We
answer in the words of Shakespeare,
modernzed:
There are more things in heaven and
Earth, old bachelor,
Than are dreampt OF in your philosophy"
SCENE FIRST.
Mrs. Biddy Chanticleer scratches
for her breakfast. 0. Chanticleer,
Esq, from the top rail of the barn
fence, becomes cognizant of the fact /,
and struts with dignity toward his
little spouse.
Biddy "Good morning, my
dear"
o. e. Esq.-Morning, madam;
quite enjoying yourself, madam; OF
course you are not aware of the fact
that l have been up for more than
an hour, and have not yet eaten a
o mouthful? Is that what I married
you for, madam? Gives her a
pointed salute on the ankle. Where
are your domestic qualities, madam ?
IImprints q mark of affection on the
top OF her head. Where was your
smile of affection when you saw me
getting off the fence? l watched
you, madam! Where was your ten
der female solicitude when you be-
held me looking weakly for the want
of little nourishment? Where, !
repeat. is my breakfast ? Cock-a
doodle-do"
Biddy (meekly)-" Have. q worm. "
SCENE SECOND.
Mrs. Biddy Chanticleer lays her
first egg, and has invited two or
three female friends to help cackle
10. G. Esq. being absent.
Mrs Biddy-" Cut, cut, cut-a-a-a!
cut, cut, cut a-a-a cut!'
Mrs. Partlett.-" Qua, qua, qua,
cut-a-a.a-cutt"
Mrs. Penfeather-" Cluck, cluck,
qua, qua, cut, cut, cut, a.a-a cut!
| lis interrupted by the sudden ap-
nearance of O. G. Esq., who has
Just returned from sag party.
O. &. ESD" Cock-a-ioodle-do!
Now, may patience be vouchsafed
TO me to ask of you, madam, what
does all this mean? Here am l, re-
turning, careworn and exhausted,
from the exci,ements and tempta-
lions of a delusive world, expecting
to find repose and peace in the quiet
of domestic nest, instead of which l
discover you in the midst OF riot and
dissipation. Madam, insult not my
penetration by denying it affirm
that you are having q party!
Mrs. Biddy (apprehensively)-
Not at all, my dear; that is, at
least, my friends were just going by,
and stopped in quite accidentally,
and so-for you see, my dear, I've
laid an egg! cut, cut, cut, a-a-a.c--
that is, at least-yes, sir, we've laid
an egg!"
Three female neighbors. simulta.
neously-"Cut, cut, cut, cut'a-a-a
cutr'
O.C. Esq. tmajestically)-"Peace,
hens. Madam, what does all this
cackling folly mean?'
IExeunt hens, in indignation.
20. c. Esq" 1t has become ne
cessary, at this stage of our mstri-
monial career, that should state,
in mild but unmistakable terms, my
opinions regarding the appropriate
sphere and duties Of henhood:
First, Self-devotion. 1t has been
tho decision of all rooster-kind, for
ages, and therefore cannot be de-
MED, that the crowning virtue Of the
hen character is disinteres:edness.
A true hen should be patient, self
forgetful, obedient, tenderly solici-
tous for her husbands little wants,
delighting wholly and solely in the
graceful and pleasant duties that
cluster round tine domestic nest.
On the contrary, I find you thinking
only how to crafty your own selfish
tastes and desires, instead OF dis
playing las might naturally be ex-
pected) some little sense of loneli-
ness and melancholy ut your hus-
bands absence; I return from a visit
OF nearly twelve hours, and find you
literally rejoicing! Madam. I ask it
OF you, is this true henhood?
Second, A retiring disposition, a
delicate shrinking from contact with
tho coarse and unsympathizing world.
an exclusive indifference to all with
out the sacred circle OF the domestic
nest. On the contrary I find you
gadding among the other hens of the
yard, making appointments, sending
invitations. Again, ask Of you.
madam, is this true henhood?
Third, Freedom from curiosity: q
true hen never evinces the slightest
interest in the affairs of her neigh
bors, scarcely in her own; she never
inquiries concerning tho whereabouts
or actions of her husband, being
perfectly assured that, wherever he
may Le, and however appearances at
the tune may seem to tell against
him, be is ever acting with view to
the welfare of the domestic nest.
On the contrary, what do I find to
be the truth in regard to yourself? ?
Not rooster raises his voice within
L.M a m;la Of fha ward hut YOU ara