Huntsville gazette., 1885-04-18
An Original Evangelist.
Gems from Brother Sam Jones, tht
Georgia Preacher.

Gems from Brother Sam Jones, the
Georgia Preacher.
From st. Louis Globe-Democrat. IN
We see Ged all around us. The noun
tains are Gods thoughts upheaved. The
rivers are Gods thoughts in motion. The
oceans are Gods thoughts imbedded. The
dewd-ops are Gods thoughts in pearls.
| believe that the whale swallowed Jonah,
and the only reason don't believe that
Jonah swallowed the whale is because the
Bible don't say SO.
You don't believe what you don't under-
stand. Do you understand why some COWS
have horns and some are muley?
You dom. believe what you don't see.
Did you ever see your backbone
The hardest things for me to believe are
the Ten Commandments and the Sermon
on the Mount.
Custom is the law of fools. and is ruin
ing this country.
God pity the man who can't run his
home without deck of cards. He ought
to have been in hell long before he had
children born untohim.
I used to dance, but when wanted a
wife I went to the prayer-meeting. and l
beat your sort, too.
If any man don't like what say let him
come to me afterward and say SO, and III
forgive him.
You dance with this world and you'll go
to hell with this world.
have no respect for Mahone's politics,
but like his answer to the question how
much be weighed. He said: II weigh
ninety-f i've pounds, but ninety pounds of
that is backbone.
Some men think they have backbone,
but it is nothing but cotton string run up
their backs.
There is more religion in laughing than
in crying. If religion consists in crying,
have the best boy in the world.
photograph your own ugliness, and you
sit here and laugh at it. You ought to be
ashamed.
/ ann a Methodist, and / want to be the
| best one God over made.
When ST. Peter said add to your knowl-
edge temperance, be didn't have reference
to you, old red-nosed Methodist Any man
who pretends to be Christian and drinks
whisky is great big old humbug-a two
legged hypocrite.
| Society is heartless old wretch, and if
you don't get out of it you will 60 to hell
with it.
| When the doctor says you can't live but
an hour, you'll want just such preacher
as is talking to you.
God bores through the top of a mans
head to his heart and on down to his pocket.
| The lawyer who knows as little about
Blackstone and the Supreme Court reports
as the average Christian does about the
Bible. would never have but one case. The
sheriff would be his next client.
If any of you don't like the way these
f; services are going. there are three doors
you are cordially asked to leave.
When your little cups full you can just
back out.
led liquor and Christianity won't stay
in The same hide.
| In Georgia town number of girls
married men to reform them, and now the
town is full of little whipporwill widows.
| How lovely is patient woman. God
pity the man who has forked-tongued
wife. 4a''
Tie matter Of Church doctrine is an ac-
cident. If my mother and Brother With
erspoons mother had swapped babies he
might have been Methodist preacher.
The devil is too much of a gentleman to
stay where he is not welcome.
The churches of Nashville furnish whis-
ky for the surrounding country. Some of
yonr wholesale dealers belong to the church.
If Brother Barbee would draw the line
where the Lord wants him to draw it, there
would not be hundred members left in
the church.
The back door of the church ought to be
opened once year and give all who have
not lived up to its rnles an opportunity to
pass out.
Bob Ingersoll (and never call his name
without feeling the need of a disinfectant)
says whisky is Gods worst enemy and the
DEVILS best friend. He is good authority
on that side.
Whisky is a good thing in its place. and
that place is in hell. If / get there will
drink all can get, but won't do it here.
STATE NEWS.
Sheffield is being awakened again.