The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1885-08-20
WHAT A CENT WILL BUY.
1he 1eagso Expenditures Possible with ,
aentazy Copper-Tranps and Beggars
Object to It. 6treot-Car Owners Like
j, bus Hunger Il Can Not An.

| 49, ~OVO SSAboSUsSSSAV0 1VOO4Uk0 VIII
Solitary Copper-Tranps and Beggars
Object to It. Streot-Car Owners Like
u bus Hunger It Can Not Ap-
| 81 peasA T. &
The manwho has only cent is very
little better off than the man who is
without q cent. Hardly anything OF
value to life can be purchased for q
cent, and indeed the familiar copper
coin was not inaptly described bv q
Washington street tramp as "a coin
OF exceptional aggravatingness." The
wandering gentleman had seen better
days, and, although there are doubt
less times when his mouth can equal
his nose In disreputable demeanor. the
polite overtures and tho cigar of tho
newspaper man were received with
sentences of appreciation betraying a
past which included education.
LAS 1 take It," said he, "a cent is
Just the amount of money the street.
car people swindle out of every pas
senger-and cents in piles are not to
be despised,-or else you can buy an
evening paper with a murder In it,
that's about all. Now, as don't ride
In cars, and l don't care much about
the new police regulations which I
read in the paper, I always wait until
got another cent, because with two
cents I can get dip of rnm. It's bad
liquor, but don't 1t tickle your throat?"
and the wandering gentleman chewed
for while on his tongue.
"A cent is the meanest coin on
earth," he continued with vehemence.
"Old ladies would always give YOU a
nickel, and so would benevolent old
gentlemen, only the cents como handi-
est-of course you say thank you, sir
and 'Gawd bless you, mum. but you
feel inclined to chuck it back, anyhow.
What can you get with itp Nothing;
not even enough bread to kill hunger
for while-thank you, SIR" and the
tramp slouched away with an cleo
mosnyary dino, down Seventh street,
slumwards, and disappeared through
the portals of the "Blazing Rag
Close to that unsavory hostolrie there
are several little stores called general
shops where the very poor buy near
ly all their necessities. The news
paper man entered one of the stores
and, finding On old acquaintance of
former stories behind the counter, was
soon in discussion on tho cent and
what can be obtained for that coin.
~ guess a good many of my customs
ers arc cent Ones" said the store
keeper, brawny Irishman, ''but it's
precious little that they get. You can
buy this roll" showing very diminu-
tive loaf, ''but there amt more than
four bites in it; or you can take your
choice of crackers, two of them, or
four OF those, or one of them, but
they'd be no use to n hungry man.
You can buy head OF cabbage for a
cont, but cabbage amt no use without
a fire to cook it, unless you're a goat
or rabbit. Then you can get bit of
soap, brown, coarse stuff, which makes
| everything smell what it washes. or a
CENTS worth of snuff, or tobacco, or a
skein OF thread, or two needles. or one
pickle, or one onion. or apple, or five
STICKS OF wood, enough to start q fire.
or short tallow candle, or paper of
pins, or two ounces of flour, or little
vinegar. or some coal oil. The oil is
about the best thing you can get, as it
is enough to keep lamp burning: all
night. Then you can buy two envcl-
oeSo W WV oICCCo Va "I1CluS pdpCIs
box, of matches, six gum drops, mon
key on stick, shoe-lace, a small
package OF pepper, starch, or good
lump of salt, or a large handful of
soda, and that's about the list.
Its the tive-cont piece that is the
coin OF the poor in this country, not
the cent. In England penny can buy
good meal. There arc soup kitch-
ems all over London whore you can get
bowl of thick pea broth or stewed
cells for ono copper, or you can buy a
large piece of fried fish or bag of
fried potatoes, or half pint of beer or
porter, or half a pound or more of
bread. or a rasher of bacon, or
sleeps tongue, or a big plate OF Irish
stew, made of potatoes and Australian
mutton, or thick slice of plum pud-
ding, Ora plateful of pease pudding.
You can quite satisfy your hunger for
penny in London. just as you can for
tive-cent piece here, but YOU can't do
it for cent; and l hope you will never
have to try"
A young woman entered the store,
dirty and unkempt but good-looking,
and purchased a cents worth of snuff.
''That's tho former wife of the old
blind bcggar," said the store-keeper.
1.-THE Press wrote all about the mar
riage three years ago, She's left him
now, got divorced, she says, and now
she's taken to snuff and young man
as mends umbrellas. 1t was all on ao-
count of the yellow dog
''How do you mcan?''
"Why: when the baby of the blind
man was christened last winter, as YOU
remember, cause you was present,
Mrs. Flanagan, the mother-in-law,
threw a lat-iron ut the yellow dog and
broke Its skull, just because the poor
animal felt deserted that evening and
took to bowling. The blind beggar
valued that dog an awful lot, loved it,
so to speak, ana wouldn't believe but
what his wife had cggcd her mother on
to killing of it and they never were
friends again. The baby died aud he
didn't 90 to the funeral, but tho fuss
no made oyer the body of the yellow
dog was trying. You sco he and that
dog had tramped lots Of miles together
and quite understood each other. He
took the dogs carcass with him to
vacant lot some where near Manavunk,
and there be got friend to dig hole
and drop tho dead animal in 1t. Ho
tramps UP, they say, TO the place, now
and they y4ere the dog lies, and !
heard as how more than once iastsuil.
mer he gathered big lunches of pansies
In the park just to place on the spot.
They arc building over the lot now,
and should not be surprised if the old
blind beggar has the remains dug up
and put somewhere else | guess he
regrets he hasn't no family vault. Still,
I human nature g goes out to dog dog some
Would-be customcr), 1--WE don't make
90 cents worth of ham. "-M:ladelphia
Press.
Kings with Petticoats.
It is remarkable fact that the pct
ticoat was FIRST worn by men, and that