The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-12-24

he was right, or TO put up some Booos bnat
had been left out of place. The one is very
punctilious about doing work not exactly
belonging to him. The other is glad to
help the other clerks in their work. The
The first viii be a prolonged nothing and
he will be poorer at sixty than at twenty.
The other-will be merchant prince.
Incidence is the cause of more failures in
all occupations than you have ever suspect
ed. People are too lazy to do what they
can do, and want to undertake that which
they can not do. In the drama of life they
don't want to be common soldier carry
ing halberd across the stage, or falcon
er, or mere attendant, and SO lounge
about the scenes till they shall be called to
be a Macready or Junius Brutus Booth.
They say, "Give me the part of Timon, of
Athens, rather than that of Flavin, his
steward" "Let me be Gym
beline, the King, rather than Pisano, the
servant" After awhile they, by some ae-
cident of prosperity or circumstances, get
in the place for which they have no quail
fication. And very soon, if the man be q
merchant, he is going around asking his
creditors to compromise for ten cents ON
tHC aOAAut' CA1 IL II SlCA 1LoAl3 nc 10 AIuh-
ing TRADES against the ingratitude of
churches. Or, if an attorney, by unskill
full management he loses a case in
which widows and orphans are robbed
of their portion. Or, if a physi-
clan, he by malpractice gives his pa
tient rapid transit from this world
to the next, as the clumsy surgeon of
Charles H., King of Navarro, having sewed
up the feeble limbs of the King in a sheet
soaked of inflammable material, and hay-
ing no knife to cut the thread, took can
die to burn off the thread, and the band
ages took fire and consumed the King.
Our incompetent friend would have made
a splendid horse doctor, but he wanted to
be professor Of anatomy in university.
He could have sold enough confectionery
to have supported his family, but he want
ed to have d sugar refinery like the Have
meyers. He could have mended shoes,
but he wanted to mend the Constitution of
the United States. Toward the end of
life these people are out of pa
tience, out of money, out of friends, out of
everything. They go TO the poor-house or
keep out of it by running in debt toiall the
SAONCAy anu SOOao SlOl CO bAtAG " III
trust them. People begin to wonder when
the curtain viii drop on the scene. After
awhile, leaving nothing but their compli-
ments to pay their doctor, undertaken and
Gabriel Grubb, the grave digger, they dis
appear. Exeunt! Kissed off the stage.
Others fall in the drama of life through
demonstrated selfishness. They make all
the rivers empty into the sea, all the roads
of emolument end at their door, and they
gather all the plumes o. honor for their
brow. They help no one, encourage no
one, rescue no one. GLOW big pile of
money can l get?" "How much of the
world can I absorb" are the chief ques-
tons. They feel about the common people
as the Turks felt toward the Asapi, or
common soldiers-considering them of no
use except to fill up the bitches with their
dead bodies while the other troops walked
over them to take the fort. After awhile
this prince of worldly success is sick. The
only interest society has in his illness is
the effect that his probable decoase may
have on the money markets. AT
ter awhile he dies. Great news
paper capitals announce how
with everything. Although for sake of
appearance some people put handkerchief
to the eye, there is not one genuine tear
shed between Central Park and the Bat
terry or between Brooklyn Heights and
Brooklyn Hill. The heirs sit up all night
while he lies in state, discussing what the
old fellow has probably done with his
money. 1t takes all the livery stables
within two miles to furnish funeral equip
age, and all the mourning stores are kept
| busy in selling weeds of grief. The stone-
cutters send in proposals for monument.
The minister at the obsequies reads of the
resurrection, which makes the hearers fear
that if the INSCRIPTIONS financier does cone
up in the general rising he will try to get
corner on tombstones and graveyard
fences. All good men are glad that the
moral nuisance has been removed. The
Wall street spectators are glad because
there is more room for themselves. The
heirs are glad because they get possession
of the long delayed Inheritance. Dropping
every feather of all his plumes, every GER
tiicate of all his stock, every bond of all
his investments, every dollar of all his
fortune, he departs, and all the rolling
of Dead March in Saul, and all the pa
geantry of his interment, and all the ex-
quisiteness of sarcophagus, and all the ex-
| travagance of epitaphology can not hide
the fact that my text has come again to
tremendous fulfillment: "Men shall clap
their their hands at him and shall hiss him
out of the place."
You see the clapping comes before the
hiss. The world cheers before it damns.
So, it is said, the deadly sap tickles be-
fore it stings. Going up is he: Hurrah !!
Stand back and let his galloping horse
dash by, whirlwind of plated harness
and tinkling headgear and arched neck.
Drink deep of his Madeira and Cognac.
Boast of how well you know him. All hats
| OFF as he passes. Bask for days and years
in the sunlight of his prosperity. Going
! down, is he: Pretend to be nearsighted so
that you can not see him as he walks past.
When men ask you if you know him, halt
and hesitate as though you were trying to
call up dim memory, and say: 'Well,
| y-e-e-s, yes, believe / once did know
him, but have not seen him for a long
time. Cross different ferry from the
one where you used to meet him,
| lest he ask for financial help.
4 4.