Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1885-10-15
HE CAUGHT A TARTAR.
The Mistake store Clerk Made when
He Chaned a COuntryman.
Philadelphia North American.


Philadelphia North American
A couple of young folks who bore
unmistakable evidence of being from
the country, and who were mistaken
by would oe~smart clerk for green
horns, called at a well known house
furnishing store on Market street yes
terday, and unrolling sheet of paper
as long as a mans arm, began buying
large number of articles, the names
of which they scratched from the
paper as soon as the goods were put
aside.
Two wash boilers"
''Jimminy, you folks are going to
have lot of dirty clothes, seems to
me" fippantly commented the clerk,
as he set the boilers aside.
1.-TWO of these wringers," said the
man indicating the kind he wanted.
"Ho, no." patronizlngly observed
the clerk, IT guess you are going to
start laundry down at Squashville. :"
TIE lady looked indignant, but
neither she nor her husband, for such
it appeared that he was, paid any at
tention to the remarks of the clerk.
Two sets OF smoothing irons and
two stands" was the next order.
THAT settles the laundry business,
sure as fate, buddy" Clipped in the
clerk as he picked up the irons He
was SO ticklod with his joke that he
dropped enc of the irons on his pet
corn, when the first smile that had
been seen on the face of either of his
customers, drew two pretty dimples in
the yo2ng lady's cheek.
SEThnpdnri r0in Or tn start q orna M orU
too?" he snarled, as the man ordered
two butter ladies.
''No; we ara not going to do any,
of the matrimonial pair of scissors, as
for the first time he appeared to notice
what the clerk was saying.
What in sheOl are you going 10 do
then2" asked the clerk as he limped
acl :, the store with the two butter
ladle ;.
"WelI, you see," said the man, with
an inimitable drawl, "Maria and / got
married last Wednesday, and we are
getting in our things now, and as we
don't know yet but we may get di-
yorce by and by, we are buying doub-
lie, SO that 1nease we do conclude to
part company there won't be any
trouble to divide what we've got.
Zone for you and one for Marian, :"
gleefully warbeled the clerk each
time he laid aside the couples after
that. When the buying was com~
pleted the customer said: NOW look
here, freshly, | Want you to divide
those goods into two equal parts,
without any duplicates in either lot
and send one to Abner Sheldon,
Spring City, and the other to Charles
r Quincy, Birdsborough. Do you
understands"
Eyes" was the somewhat doubtful
assent of the clerk.
We'll. continued the countryman.
''these goods are to be sent o. 0. D.,
and if you get any of them naked Hp,
and 1 have to send any of my batch
to my brother>in-law, or he has to
send any to nae, to correct your bluad~
ers, the cost of freight will be deduct>
ed from the money RENTED. Now
there is just one more thing that
want to say to you before | go out. I
will be Obliged to you if you will tell
your employer that unless he finds q
more civil clerk I shall find another
place TO do my buying"
AS the counryman and his wife
walked out, and the clerk tried to
make up a satisfactory explanation to
the old gentleman, who had stepped
out of the back office just before the
customers parting shot, it is probable
he resolved never to chaff a ''green-
horn" again.