The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1885-07-25
fHe ALMANAC COAT


A wouderfaI Garmeat That WIN Fore
tell the Weather and Keep Away the
Cholera
Herman" said Hofenstein. Is he
entered the store and hung his hat on q
bail. Il hat shust bad big SURPRISE,
you knew"
How vas dat, Misder Hoffenstein9"
inquired Herman. noticing that the old
man was in good hum6r.
"vell. you see, goes up NIT de ex-
POSITION dis morning. qnd vat you dink.
meets Jake Loewenburg und Solomon
Myers, vat vas old ffents uf mine id
Vicksburg twenty-five years ago. Loe-
wenburgh vas at de EXPOSITION as Won
uf dose Turks, und vas selling beads
und oder leedle dings. und Myers told
me dat he vas dere as an Egyptian, und
vas making bienty uf money. Veil, ven
sees dose fellows it takes my breath
right away, because / drinks dey vas
dead. Myers broder Jake vas counting
my wife Leah a. de same time | vas, und
We vas great frents. Myers dells me
dat jake failed in pisness at Leedle
Rock short vile ago ind vas doing
veil, because he fails on Won side uf his
store und runs de oder"
Hoffenstein smiled pleasantly at the
dea, and walked to the door and looked
down the street, and as he did so Gus
TONER tame ILL.,
Wat can do for you, my frent?" he
inquired.
Il want to get a good coat. but one
that is cheap. I'm farmer, and go in
for comfort more than do for style"
You vos right about dot. my trent.
and l drinks dot l can fit you mid a
good articls at an easy brice. Now,
here vos coat for eight dollars. vich is
de very ding you want, and he pulled
a coat out of pile of rather tough
looking clothing.
The customer commenced to examine
it, but suddenly lifted his nose and ex-
claimed: ''Whew by jingo! there is a
last years smell about this coat that is
not pleasant. What have you been
doing with it?h
II knew you vos going to say do"
said Hofiensten, in a nonchalant way.
"Ail of my customers say dot ven dey
look at de coat, because dey don't
disinfecting coats vich hat siiust been
put on de market not more as dree
months ago. DE coat vat you haf in
your hand vas soaked in de WOOL factory
we're it vas made NIT brepar alton ex-
hressly for de purpose Of keeping de
cholera away. tind my bruder yot Ifs in
Europe writes me last week dot de
Prussian Government wont let de people
wear any oder kind. so dot if de cholera
comes along dey viii keep helty, you
know. Herman, look in my desk und
get my bruder Ike's letter. vich We
shows de gentleman. No, nefer mind,
/ forgot dot leaves dot letter NIT my
wife dis morning. My trent. dot coat
vas better for de cholera den all de
doctors und de medicine vot you can
hat, und dc smell uf de preparation
goes right away ven you goes out nit
de air. Put on dc coat, my trent, und
We sees how II fits. you know"
The customer did so, and surveyed
first one side of himself and then the
other by the aid OF the dingy mirror in
the rear end of the store.
why do you call it an almanac
coat?n asked the customer, who was
rather pleased with the cut of the coat.
because 1t vos made EXPRESSLY for
| gentlemen vot Ifs on farm, ind il viii
| dell you how de vedah will pc, und vot
to do to save your crop. You see de
| changes in de vedder haf de same effect
on dot coat as dey hat on so much quick
silver, und vos dwice so much more re-
liable. Ven you see dc coat commence
| to turn red around de collar it vas a