davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
BRIGHT BITS.

A NEW YORK POLICEMAN VINO had cayenne
pepper thrown into his eyes cannot pc maze
10 believe that pepper IS the least DIT auul-
terated.-Detr0it Free Press.
A PLUsIBER has been indicted for man
slaughter on account of defective work done.
Next they'll indict them for larceny Tor col
lecting their bills. The world moves.-MdTd-
MOR independent.
ALAwYER in Columbia Ohio spelled eli
ept in three different ways on the same page
of his brief, and while the papers were pOklnS
fun at him he went ahead ana won hls case,
and pocketed a fee of $500.-Detrot Free Press.
A GERMAN loves to contemplate himself, a
F'renchman to talk about himself, an English
man to blow about himself. an Italian to
mourn about himself, an Irishman to swear
about himself, and ankee 10 ouIlle theH
all.-Pittsburg Chronicle Iete0rdph'
scrxr in the Chinese war.-Captain of iron
clad to artilleryman-"DO you see that
Chinese general there, about three miles of
Let him have one of those eight inca sheils IN
the eye. Artilleryman, equal 10 the sltuao
iiOn-"Aye, aye, sir. Which eye, your honor:
Paris Paper.
BEGIN as You mean to go On.-Another
fact. They have Gently been ana got
married, and have just returned from their
honeymOon.l He: II wonder why so many
people stare at us, my DEAR she; mo
doubt they are wondering what could nave
seen in Ou."-JEdy.
A
appointed): Now. constable, what cases
tins morning?" Police Sergeant: please,
your Worship, l have in custody-John SIM
mons. alias Jones, alias Smith. al" Magls-
trate: ''Ah, well-Tn try the women nrst
Bring in Alice Jones w-PUnch
AWAY with thy silly questions, pensive Al
thea. away with them, and bother us no more
": or. by the beard of the weather prophet,
we will have at thee. When does the kanga-
roo stop jumping? Why, Althea, when ms
main spring Is broken, of course. Watch!
Ha, ha, ha! He, he, he!-Puc6.
THE peasants of Huntingdonshire are prov
erbial for their bOOrishness. one day lady,
riding through the grounds OF friend TO
whom she was on visit, found the gate closed
which was the outlet from the fields TO the
high road; a peasant boy stepped forw&rd,
and bowling, opened the gate that she might
mass ssWhat is your namer asked the lady.
!sTummus," SAID the boy, with another bow.
ssAh!'' replied the lady. giving him shilling,
~ see You are not HuntingdOnshire boy
Won are so civil" To which the urchin re-
Joined, 'sThee'rt liar; be."-GtdSgoo Eren-
ing Times.
ONLY a girl on roller skates,
Only female defying the fates;
Only step or two out on the floor,
Only this, then something more.
Only man on the backward glide,
thhands outstretched and feet spread wide;
Only bold dash, then a dull thud.
Only a scream that would curdle your blood.
Only mIngllng Of stripes in air,
Only a shower of auburn hair;
Then she sat on HIM by the ton,
Never was man so sat upon.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
Mla,,isa

w A An,.i,l., ID 4 J. young WHO'S emu,
bookkeeper of experience. ~ work; <
short hand and operate the c9licaso NJ
references. Address W, this oeii,9ssf aph; b
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

1t is reported that Mr.. Tilden proposes
IN leave a novel and worthy monument TO
his memory. The rumor has been set
afioat that he has left by his will his
country seat at Yonkers, known as Grey
stone. to be used as an educational insti-
tuition for young men who intend to seek
DoliticaI careers. 1t is provided that
there is to be a select course of study in
the political history Of the past, biogra-
phy Of all the great statesmen, knOwl-
edge of all the important legislation,
supplemented by his large and valuable
library. and by the instruction Of cOmpe-
tent and cultured teachers. The design
IS to lift politics from low and grOveling
levels. and to fit ambitious youth for
something nobler than the caucus and the
convention.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
Che #lurnina Stems.


sirAKEa STREET. sAvANS All. ca.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
Rewards that Democrats May Re

At present it looks as if Mr.. Cleveland
would have quite number of very I'M
portant life offices TO fill. Chief Justice
Waite has been seriously i'll for six weeks.
At one time his life was despaired of, and
the latest report is that his family hasn't
much hope that he will ever recover his
health. 1t has been suggested that if the
Chief Justice becomes satisfied that his
recovery Is an impossibility he will resign
in time to allow President Arthur to az
point his successor. 1t is difficult, how
ever. to convince a man who is not very
near deaths door that he has no
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
Wmfirmra RemroIEp.
Itching Diseases.

TCZEMA, or Salt Rheum, with its agonizing
u itching and burning, instantly relieved
by a warm bath with CUTICURA SOAP. and
single application of CUTICURA, the great skin
Cure. This repeated daily, with two or three
doses of CUTfCURA REsOLvENT. the New
Blood Purifier, to keep the blood cool, the
perspiration pure and unirritating, the bowels
Open the liver and kidneys active, Will
speedily cure Eczema, letter, Ringworm.
Psoriasis, Lichen, Pruritus, Scald Head, Dand-
ruff, and every species of Itching, Scaly, and
Pimply Humors of the Scalp and Skin, when
the best physicians and ali known remedies
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08


When Mark Twain was serving as private
secretary to Senator Jim Nye. of Nevada, he
replied TO letter from some of the Senator )
constituents asking for subscription to aid
in building a church: "What you want IS not
a church. but a nice large. strong new jail. o."
So Mr.. Randall says to the Southern people
what you want is not cheaper blankets.
clothing, sugar, salt. glass, crockery, lumber
coal and iron, but cheaper whisky and to-
bacco., MARX" lost his place, Randall Will
Ioua his Ia
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
CURRENT COMMENT


JWICIIIV LtIIEco LIFtVtsIf
In case Dakota is not admitted into the
union. some Of the nOsiest lunatlcs up there
tbreaten 10 set up a northwestern republic OF
their own. Here is a chance. perhaps, for Mr..
Blaine. over whom the Dakota people are
very enthusiastic. to get a little presidency.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

LONDd|
money:
NEW ! |
Money Il
O. SOY
quiet. /
$500 p.|
at 11<01|
sold, 81
eFnmend|
three paI
The sd
was a ID
first caI1
/ Union. II
| after IN
| unfavorI
|. Ing the n
! capitali5|
made a 4
carryin1
runors n
pied, bul
nuring Il
ing eit1
punnero1
alive. III
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
ECZEMA TMENTY YEARS

Ny gratitude to God is unbeunded for the
relief / have obtained from the use of the
CUTICURA REMEDIES. / have been troubled
with Eczema on my legs for twenty years.
had not comfortable night for years, the
burning and itching were so intense. Now, L
am happy to say, have no trouble. Only the
liver cOlored patches on my limbs remain as
token of my former misery.
HENRY L. SMITH.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The alleged young reformer, Theodore
Roosevelt. and his followers, did not have
much influence in organizing the New
York legislature. Even the Republicans
there appear to be Of the opinion that
dudes ought 10 20.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
A Genius in state Craft.

I'HiLIUeJDUtU 7 tItto LL3ttL.Js
Mr.. Cleveland, in spite of his lack of expe-
rience. has sustained himself well, and his adj
mipistration may safely challenge cOmparisOn
with his more widely known predecessors.
tie Will now go to work far greater than
that which fell to any of his predecessors at
any npriOd of their lives,
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Kate Fields lectures would draw i've
times as large crowds if she would agree
to divide her time with one Of the wives OF
a Mormon elder who is said to be comin2
East to answer her facts and arguments
about D0Ivgamv
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

A NEW YORK POLICEMAN who had cayenne
neDper thrown INTO his eyes cannot be made
10 believe that pepper is the least bit adul-
terated Detroit Free Press.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Suits for breach Of promise are OF daily
occurrence at tine North, but one re-
Gently begun ct Williamsport, Pa, IS the
msst sensational of the new year. A young
woman, % years Of age, has sued a man
of 50. laying the damages to her unscPhis-
ticated young heart at $4,000. What
CAV and festive old deceiver the defend
ont must have hppu.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

While Mrs. Bonanza Mackey is an al
legged art connOisseur, and has paid $1,000
for a small painting by Gerome' 1t Is sus-
pected that the old man does not know
patent medicine chrome from a Raphael.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

There being a probability that Mr..
Winthrop on account CT illness will not
be able TO dedicate the Washington monu-
ment on the 21st Of next month, II mas
been suggested that James G. Blaine be
called on to ill his place. The fitness OF
things should always be considered. The
Father of his country, it viii be remem-
bered. could not tell lie.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

When the Pennsylvania Republicans
try To wig-wag when Simon and Don
Cameron 60 not order them, they are
pretty sure TO have to pay the forfeit
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

r., st'-sf af ~ POr Ofscs IN SErgBa1A 10
.s,sf CIdss Nail hIfts-.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Whether it is true or not that James
Gordon Bennett tried to catch Bonanza
Mackay's daughter, he appears TO have
completely captiyated the old man.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

As soon as Mr.. Randall appeared in the
House Monday, quite a number Of Repub-
hcan protectionists VENT greet him and
have word with him about the solid
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Mr.. Randall appeared in the House GA
Monday in a brand new suit OF dark grew
cloth. This is no Indication, however.
chat Mr.. Randall has gone over soul an
body % the Confederates. He Is still
loyal to Pennsylvania. pig iron and pr
lection
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The astronomers have laid the weather
prophet in the shade. They predict that
within a few million years the earth Will
freeze so as TO become uninhabitable.
The astronomers are smart enough to put
the date Of the fulfllment Of their
propbssfes so Ear OF that they Will not
loose their regulations.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
grrnrD 0Ialule.
FRENCH SPOLIATI0N CLAIMS.

-ited to call upon or address the subscriber,
who viii give information in relation to the
claims and prepare them for collection:
Oi1i'--9 A. E. ALLEN.
OFFICES: 246 Washington St., Boston; l49
Broadway. New York; 1929 New I ork ave-,
washington, d. G. Hon. GEO. ). BUT
WELL will act as Ceunse-
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Your most valuable CUTICURA REMEDIES
have done my chud so much good that feel
like saying this for the benefit OF those who
are troubled with skin disease. My little girl
was troubled with eczema, and tried several
doctors and medicines, but did not 40 her any
good until | used the CUTICURA REMEDIES,
which speedily cured her, for which l owe
you many thanks and many nights of rest.
ANTON BOSSMIER, Union Bakery.
EDINBVRGH I'm
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The Baltimore Sun announces that 2,OOO
kilos OF Iupines, a species Of bean, ar
rived at that port last week in the bark
Mary HasbrOuck from Legh0rn' Italy'
The Iupines are intended for orange
planters in Florida, Who plant the seed
between the rows Of trees, and when ma
tured plow under the plants as 4 ferti-
Tfyar
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Kelly appears 10 have been too macl
occupied swearing at the man who ac-
cused him of using compressed air to
produce his wonderful force TO make his
usual announcement on the first of the
month That be would astOnish the natives
i'm a few weeks.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
znpmrB to Eoau.
aIropoeala ZlIamtrO.
Proposal



OFFICE CLERK OF C0uNu
Jan. 2, 1856
A r the first regular meeting to be D
"A January, that is TO say, on Neal'
the 18th day Of January, 1885. Counc
open bids for removing garbage from lh
south of Anderson street twice every
for two years, the terms and conliH
contract to be similar to those set iorlA
dinance regulating scavcnger contraSc!..
Bids must be sealed and handed "
Office Of the Clerk Of Council at OF De
O'Clock P. NJ. MONDAY, Jan. y, l'5'
bids must be accompanied by names OF
ties two required). who viii be re4ul
sign bond FIR 1850 over and above me ~
OF bid and their qualification as pom
before Notary Public must Dee enclosc.'
bin. No bi VIII receive the considers.
Council unless fled Ia accordance WIN
visions rcclted above.
BY order OF Council or
FRANK j.. BEBARE
Clerk Of Coui
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

1t is narrated that Queen Victoria has
already caused Prince Henry, Of Batten-
berg, her to-be-son-in-laH, TO begin MS
court life 10y acting as gentleman usher
ut BaImoral. He is, doubtless, quite
thankful that she did not put him to cur
rviur Her Naiestv's COWS.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The Legislatures Of about three-fourths
Of the States Of the Union are in session,
aud rural statesmen are achieving great
ness.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Next t. a walking match is Mr.. r. r. saul
ters walking fifteen miles in one day, fishing
and hunting. He lives at Athens, Ga, is IS
wears old, has had a running ulcer or his leg
80 years-one- half a century-and previous to
that day had not walked over half mile per
day for 80 years. Mr.. Saulter, the Bdna1er-
Waterman and Rev. DIR. Calvin johnson say
that b. Il. B. cured the ulcer and restored
him.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

1t is stated that ex-Secretary Robson
threatens to print a carefully prepared
and fully matured arraignment OF the
public press. 1t is hardly necessary to
remind the reader that the public press
has not been very backward in the past
in printing carefully prepared and fully
matured arraignments of Mr.. Robson.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The Providence Telegram boasts that
the Rhode Island exhibit was the only
one complete at the opening of the cotton
exposition. That's nothing to brag about.
1t wouldn't have taken long TO have
carried the whole state down to New
Orleans and set itup in one of the wings
OF the government building.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

A little sunshine now and then is rel
ished by the worst Of men.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
TETTER OF TIE SCALE.

was almost perfectly bald, caused by Tet-
ter of the top of the scalp. l used your CUTI-
CURA REMEDIES about SIX weeks, and they
cured my scalp perfectly, and now my hair Is
coming back as thick as it ever was.
J. p. CHOICE.
WUITFSRORO TEXAS
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Ex-Chairman Jones, OF the Republican
National Committee, swOre the horse was
I6 feet high, and he is determined to stick
TO #. Hence he persists that President
Arthur was not very anxious for the cleo
ton of Blaine. Well, it don't matter
much lust now, as both Blaine and Ar
thur have been relegated to private life
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
nnntrttrr's BiftFrn.
3f1FniraI.

sob, might l kiss those eyes of fire,
Ten thousand scarce would quench desire;
Still would l steep my lips in bliss,
And dwell an age on every kiss"
That young dude needs something for his
blood; he is utterly too fresh. B. y. b. is the
best thing for him, because one bottle viii
cure him. But that dude is not all alone in his
terrestrial glory-not by jug full" Many
others are considerably "rattled" just now
about that blood poison business, but Is. B. B.
will cure for the least money and in the short
est time. The boom is coming. Purify, purify.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
COVERED WITH BLOTCHEs.

l want to tell you that your CCTICURA RE
SOLVENT is magnificent About three months
ago my face was covered with b Otches, and
after using three battles of RESOLVENT | was
perfectly cured. FREDERICK MAITRE.
% ST. CHARLEs STREET. NEW ORLEANs La.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The opinion expressed By New York
correspondent that Judge o. A. Lochrane,
of Atlanta, would be probably member
Of Mr.. CIevelaud's Cabinet, is too pre-
posterous for anything. The Judge is
Jolly and snowy, but it may be safely
assumed that Mr.. Cleveland Will not
need any Republicans in his Cabinet.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

The New York people are repeating the
sold, old story so often told elsewhere
about how their gas bills are larger since
the price has been reduced to 81 70 per
thousand than they were when it was
81 p. and vet they burn no more gas now
than they did then. The consolidated gas
companies Of New York are said to be
having enormous dividends, and yet de-
clare that gas cannot be furnished for less
.bau 81 70. The New Workers are not
satisfied with this statement, and point
70 London where gas is sold at 70 cents
and the stockholders receive an annual
dividend of IL per cent.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

''Oh, JOSIE" said little gleeful Maud, 'we
are going to have some honey made at our
house" GLOW do you knOw?' asked Josie.
Because mamma sent the servant after three
Rs, and don't know what bees are good for
only to make honey"
For sale hY OSCEOLA BUTLER. Druggist.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08

Messrs. Gilbert and Sullivan, so long
after having made a great hit IN taking
of the Queens Navee," IN ''Plnaiore'
are said to be arranging a comic opera on
the Nile expedition. OF course 1t VIII
get all the fun possible out of the "Queen's
Armee'' and the camel marines, and no
doubt the MUdir Of DOngola and FL
Mahdi will sim very imnortant parts.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-08
IVY POISONING.

For all cases of poisoning by ivy or dogwood,
/ can warrant CUTICURA to cure every time.
l have sold it for five years and 1t never fails.
c. II. MORSE, Druggist.
HOLLISTON, MASS.
Sold everywhere. CUTICURA, Soc; SOAP,
25c.; RES0LYEHT, 81.
Smyrna times., 1885-07-22

Smyrna Branch Trains.
Going North, 7.23A NJ. SIS AN. IIO7AM4l5P.
Going South, $50 l44P.M. APP. NJ. 7.43 "
Smyrna times., 1885-07-22
Pennsylvania Railroad.

The Pennsylvania Railroad is one of
the greatest systems Of Interstate COM
munication in the world. Long years
of careful and judiciOus management
has placed it in position above the
fear of competition from rival lines
Its systems connects two oceans, and
reaches, with It's tributary lines, every
important point in the country. Its
appointments are superb, and it has
contributed more than any other road
to make travelling luxury. Accidents
to its employees or patrons are matters
of rare Occurancc.
1t would take columns to describe in
brief its many advantages. Every
safeguard, every comfort, every luxury
that ingenious minds have devised and
cunning hands fabricated in railroad
economy, are in practical operation ON
the Pennsylvania.
The inducements it holds out to
summer tourists are unparalleled. 1t
controls direct chain OF eOmmunica-
ton between Philadelphia and the
ocean resorts stretching from Sandy
Hook to Cape May Point. If the coun-
try is preferred, the Pennsylvania road
carries the traveller to all important
places in New York, New England and
Pennsylvania.
All the famous health resorts are
| tapped by it, and whether the invalid
be afflicted with consumption or hay
fever, the Pennsylvania will take him
to the place of cure Its enterprise has
built up along its main lines Of travel,
within a few minutes ride of Philadel-
phia, a hundred little villages, and
places that few years ago were pri-
meVal wastes but now bright with Il
new life.
Its road-bed is rock -ballasted, its
rails are steel, its rolling stock Of the
most approved pattern, and lis en-
plOyes are trained to habits Of polite
ness and attention to the travelling
public. Parlor-cars, dning-cars, and
sleeping-cars are attached, where
necessary, to trains: and it is one Of
! the wonders of modern railroad travel
ing that the Pennsylvania, more than
any other road, has assisted in develop
ing and pertecting, that one can lire
on II railroad train in as much ease and
comfort as in ones own home.
The Pennsylvania road never retro
| grades. 1t always moves upward anu
onward" and it uses all legitimate
means to compass this end It's jealous
Of the rights of its patrons, and quick
to defend them. The machinery Of it,
management runs like well-oiled
piece Of mechanism, smoothly and
without Jar CT crash. Every new in
vention in railroad economy is careful
ly investigated. If its adoption i,
found ID add to the comfort, conven-
fence, or salty Of the tray cling public
no expense is spared to secure its con
troll. Its vast army Of employees art
trained to observe this one precept
"Thc comfort of our patrons above all
else" Its motto might justly be writ
ten thus: 'Speed safety comfort. -
PhHadciphia Saturday Night, JUne 25ih
| 1888.
Smyrna times., 1885-07-22
Furniture of all kinds,

ParlOr and Chamber suits. Bureaus Redsteads,
Chairs Lounges Tables Stands. Mattresses. Spring
Beds and every thing in the Furniture Line guar
anteed at or less than City prices for the same
quality of goods Jan 2-tf
Smyrna times., 1885-07-22
MARYLAND Items.

The first barrel Of sweet potatoes lett
Accomac county by the steamer 1dngier
for Baltimore, July 18th.
The locusts are nearly all dead IN
the vicinity of ElktOn, as are also many
Of the tops Of the young trees.
Miss Charlotte Reed, Of Bay View,
Cecil county, WAS seriously burned by
the explosion Of coal-oil lamp Satur-
day.
George W. Tyler's packing house at
St. Michaels, has been destroyed by
fire. The loss is estimated at $4,000,
of which 81 500 is covered by insurance.
A curious law suit is in progress at
Oxford. to determine whether town
has right to create n nuisance by
burning oyster shells into lime near
the residences of citizens.
The farmers Of WicomicO county met
in The court houseat Salisbury Tuesday
TO effect IL permanent organization;
After this is done the association VIII
meet regularly to discuss subjects o.
interest TO the farmers.
Very few people exceptdealers know
that soft crabs cannot survive thuh
derstorm after they are taken out 0
Smyrna times., 1885-07-22

their native element. Much testimony
in support of the theory can be adduced
from those who have given the subject
mature study and investigation, and
on whose hands dozens upon dozens
have been lost.
Many person wish to get out of jour
nalism and there are always many
equally as ambitious to get in. This is
we'll illustrated by the fact that during
the past few months no less than TWEEN
ty-fve changes have occurred in the
ownership and management of PENN
sula newspapers, the majority Of them
on the Eastern shore.
An old Institution ReUiUed.-The
Maryland Academy, at Oxford, which
was burned down before the war, and
was once presided over by General
Tilghman, has been re-established.
Eastford Hall, noble estate, lying
right on the shore, with good bathing
and drilling grounds and pure air and
water, has been secured and will ac-
cOmmOdate 200 cadets. An experienced
faculty has been employed, the cadets
are engaged and large school will
open on September 10th. The U. ).
Government will detail a West Point
graduate for the post.