McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1885-01-22
USEFUL AND PLEASANT.


In France, because the water in that
country is always l'eau.
The snow is so deep in northern
Arizona that stage-drivers refuse to
drive between Prescott and Phoenix.
The total production of cigars in this
country, as estimated by one OF the
largest manufacturers, is about 5000,
600, 1000 year.
The capitalists of the Lake Superior
copper mines universally oppose the
Spanish treaty because OF the rich cop
per fields of Spain.
A travelling Illinois theft, unaware
that his wife had gone to housekeep-
ing in Elgin, broke in at night and
carried off lot of his own jewelry.
Mr.. w. w. Story, the American
sculptor now living in Rome, has re-
ceived commission from Cornell UNI
versity for a bronze statue of Ezra
Cornell.
The information is just at hand that
the country contains over twelve
thousand medical students. 1t was,
indeed, time for a change OF admin
istration.
Boy with feeling)-Tm an orphan,
and fathers broke his legs and is in
Jail, and mothers in an insane asylum,
and if 90 home without any money
they'll lick me.
Mrs. Martha Strickland and Miss
Lee of Michigan have lately been noml-
uated for the Offices of Circuit Court
Commissioners by their respective
parties in Michigan.
The Florida orange crop this season
is reported to be so much larger than
the packing-box manufacturers antlci-
pated that the shippers now find it
difficult to buy boxes for their fruit.
A band of sheep belonging to MIR.
Love, of Lower Power, Oregon, be-
came frightened and stampeded, and,
running into a narrow canyon, two
hundred of them were smothered to
death.
When little Willie L. first heard the
Drawing of mule he was greatly
frightened; but after thinking a
minute he smiled at his fear, saying
Mamma, just hear that poor horse
wiz the whooping cough !"
In Virginia City, New, few days
ago, Sierra valley man offered four
hundred jack-rabbits for sale. The
Enterprise says the skins would almost
clothe all the remaining members OF
the Washoe tribe of Indians.
A number of persons from Maine to
California unite in testifying, in the
last number of Forest and Stream, that
a brook trout weighing twenty-four
pounds was caught about 1S49 in a
pond near Kennebago lake. Maine.
The humorous market is dull. We
quote coachmen jokes, prime, at 5 and
6 cents per million ice cream jokes,
no demand bank cashier Jokes, weak
at to u cents per ton choice plum
Der Jokes in demand at 81 to So per
ton.
Examiner-Now can you tell me
which of the planets were known to
the ancients? Student-Ah. there
was Venus and-ah Jupiter and
and-l think, think the earth, but-but
I'm not quite certain about the
latter!
A newly-imported bush fruit from
South America is being introduced
among the fruit-growers of Los An
geles. 1t is called the melon shrub.
It bears luscious fruit about the size
of goose egg, and produces fruit all
the year round.
ssSmith, how is it that you always
get such good bargains?" queried
Jones. Because 1 was taught from
nv infancy habits of thrift, patience,
and economy replied Smith. ''My
father was always drumming it into
me 10 wait little while and you IL
purchase cheaper Why, even my
mother used to sing 'bye-low, baby,
before could walk Jones was per-
fectly satisfied with the explanation.
Insurance Agent-"It's all rig hit.
The doctor says you are the best risk
he ever examined. Citizen-''The
best risk?'' eyes; soundest constitu-
ton, and perfect health, you know"
..Did he say that?'' Eyes, indeed.
No trouble about your case. He said
there was nothing to prevent you from
living hundred years" ''You don't
mean it?' ''Honest truth. Come
right around to my Office and I'll fix
up the papers at once" ''No, thank
you; it won't pay. I'm too healthy"
The most cunning in fish lore with
us consider that the German or Euro
pean carp is par excellence the fish OF
the future-the fish for the million.
No other fish can to SO large an extent
be cultivated for edible purposes. 1t
possesses every requisite essential to
cultivation, and especially for still
water. 1t is in the main vegetarian,
and, indeed, omnivorous-not refus-
ing animal food if properly prepared.
1t requires no food or care during the
winter, which it sleeps away in its
''kettle,'' alongside its bed-fellows,
until awakened by the warmth of a
spring sun. The rate at which this
fish grows is almost incredible.
AS two women were riding a few
days ago, in a phaeton drawn by two
horses in the vicinity of Fort heogh,
Montana, the animals took fright at an
old buffalo skeleton lying on the
prairie, and dashed toward the bluffs
overhanging the Yellowstone river, all
the efforts of the occupants of the We
hicle to check them being in vain.
J. L