New-York tribune., 1885-03-14
TIE TALK OF THE DAY.

TIE TALK OF THE DAH
The suits of Arctic clothing purchased BY tia -.
Deuartment for the Greedy Relief Expedition ~ q
summer at cost Of S55 each, recently bcusAt 8
an auction sale by speculator In this city abouf
srit Tho purchaser has sold nearly all Of them slue &
from $40 to $50 each the buyers beng curiosity hunt
very gentle saueal is heard from some Of the Me-
mother had company Tor tea and who began ShinSS
ing Now WILLIE" said the fond parent diin'tcS y
9Ssn s tho s hssn s 'na :'ssis
but didn't know your company was going % ~
down everything "-lreoris Transcript
Ono of the minor results of the uprising Of II Mdis
the soudan may possibly be gum arabic famine. NJ
Of the gum arabic OF commerce from the eosnr
now in the possession Of the False Prophet; and M
the fall of Khartoum little gum arabic has found i NJ
ont OF the soudan. But as there Is largo supplye
gum IN this country this embargo has yet eauea
much embarrassment
gentleman living at Grinnel Ioga is IN tie city +
aay 9n8 @ have never seen in print Ben was devssns
a speech at Grinnell In the last Presldentla campam
Ress waeR some s,apd When the General began h add
they Lowered over his head string rom WHICH spooa
spt General Butler as soon as he the dangling
spoon cutched it aud placed II 10 MS pocket remsrn
sWhy, that's the oae didn't get."-lDuoaqusI Isls-
grapa-DemOcrat. II
There ia wild rumor aaoat that FL Mahdi has be0
asked to deliver the next course Of Boston Moudp
lectures.
A man I'm Meudon, France while knocking down nun
from tree was struck in the right eye Dy isns nsk
,arrhs snfering We may add for the benefit OF written
OF Sunday books, that the man was .no
of tie place and had legal right to gather tne MUS
predatory boy would have captured every nj. nut on
tree without suffering as much as q t"'ns0 " 'A'
encc.-l lN0rristown Herald
THE MAHDrs BATTIEsoNa.
Pm desert hyena, am,
And dwell in the sandy souaan i..s.rs Loaf
can arigur and shoot, and the BritSners oss
From Beersheba clear into Dan. "nooP'
Ihsve ostrich on toast every day,
Ike usc crocodile stew, with jackal or two
Just TO eat as desert, as they say
I'm the twelve-fngered Mahdi, I am.
I'm a tailless baboon and roaring SIMEON,
And can wollOp the British, can.
Ihave men by the million or more,
And cOncubnes, TOO, by the score
I'm a son-of-a-gun from the land OF the sun,
I'm rcd-handed Arab lor gore!
Then. whoop! for the sandy soudan,
Let any one stop me who can
I'm a crooked-eyed bow-legged son-ota,gun,
I'm for gore-rm very bad man WhooRi
| -lEugene Clay Fergusonin GalvestonSeva
with touching simplicity The Rochester Union says thar
to appoint to offices patriotic Republicans ana 'noe-
| pendents who without joining the Democratic paT!
voted the Democratic Presidential ticket. would be 70
l
their noca action by hope OF reward" Come to think
Of IT. that s So Now let the mputaton be wi'hdrawn
| and the imputator hayed alive.
DOCTOR IN Warren N H. makes his rounds on snos-
shoes day he got caught in hedge sea ass an
patients recovered before he was ui'co'eteo sA1
| trlcated i Burlington Free Press' y
Among the foolish measures before the Legislature
bill TO limit the height of buildings The thns 70 "sS
late is their construction and foundation stfens'n
| The maid WAS young, the maid was fair,
| And many lovers sought her;
| Her father millionaire
And she an only daughter
| No sniter that the maiden met
Until in CIpid's slken net
Her fathers coachman caught hcr
Then anxiously she passed the days,
Elopemcnt contemplating,
Until she caught the skating craze
| And took to rollerskating
| She threw the coachman over then
| To him 1t was crtshei'-
| And eoped one night at harpast ten
| Aud married polo rusher" 60,
What towards women are when there Is. {. .LS gun
pistol in their vicinity They VIII na on S Ssdr tye@Ds anS %
poplar leaf. - though the gun or pistol De w.ags. ~
lock- stock ana oalre Dut s n, hsr%n, now nonehalap
cock it. peer n;o the muzzle and give hrstclass ~
for either the doctor Or undertaken Man Is conssny
and In nnmbcrless ways showing his vast supeho''
| over woman. -lBoston Transcript
| One man in Brooklyn feels particularly bad ao0u
| Plumber McCrossan's clopcment. lie has house
which the water pipes are out OF order ana Mceros
was given the work OF fixing them. II took the usaA
long time for the plumber ascertain Just what 1oos
were required do the work. but when he mado w ="
mind what tools TO use the OF the house natuaH
thought that the bulk OF the work was DONE But nov
that MoCrossan gone away he must engage ano'u.
PLUMBER and experience the same ordeal he aoes w
| expect to have the job flushed before next iaL
| The cat sings the fence
| The cat II sad.
| You can tell that from the song ii sings
| Cats sing most when they are most sad
| The boy hears the cat and Is sad TOO.
| The boy has toy gun. =. ...w
lie thinks ii he could shoot the cat 1t would ma""
| less sad.
| Kind boy
| Al least II would make II sing less.
The boy hides behind the bush aud Shoots
Has he shot the catf
No, he has shot his pa.
| How his pa howls!
| He is the sad one now
| But the boy will be sad soon.
| VIII he he spanked , .,.a
| You bet your uttermost picayune he wil-spa3AS
| till lie is blue. 49, u, ar..,,.