The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-05-15
LADY COTTONBLOOM.
CHAPTER I,

1890 80. = httNc 'iSh plt}lHA LllC
slave long enough. Ibave been caper-
ing to your whims until my Judgment
tells me"
Your Judgment, Mr.. HamP'
Yes, my judgment
judgment, Mr.. Ham"
Neither did the people who marked
my devotion to YOU"
."Oh, you are very complimentary
and so charming of manner. Why,
SIT, your name alone is quite Il
little social gathering, Bucksnort
Ham"
Quite as good a name, THANK YOU,
as Puss Hennitin. am not ashamed
of my ancestors"
"Oh, you had ancestors. had YOU?
You are surprising as well as enter
tanning"
81 do not doubt you are surprised.
Ancestry unquestionably has astrange
sound to you"
What are you quarreling about?"
asked an old lady entering the room
where the Young woman and young
man sat glazing at each other.
"Why, you are enough to make u
person believe that you are already
married"
Bucksnort Ham was an Arkansaw
planter. He was all, if not more. than
his nam implied. Once when he
was Il member of the legislature. a
citizen told newspaper correspondent
that one OF the general asscmblymen
was named Bucksnort Ham, and
straightway the correspondent went
into the house and picked out the
identical man. He did not seem so
much to have fitted himself to the
name rs the name seemed to have fit
ted itself to him. He had a way of
blowing his nose-and it sounded like
the mort Of a buck-and his back, at
a little distance, looked exactly like a
canvasscd ham. He seemed to have
been designed to create a favorable
sensation in the legislature, for he
voted against every appropriation and
state officers. He was a shrewd dem
agogne, always keeping one eye on
his constituents and the other on his
per diem.
Miss Puss Hennilin was dim eyed.
She was languid, like a caterpillcr
that has staid out all night in the dew.
She read American noveiists whose
plots are pitched IN foreign lands. She
was not handsome, but people said she
was good. The mourners' bench at
Mount Catnip church could have ill
spared her. In the autumn she shed
tears at the altar: in the winter she
faced her ''podnerh and shuflied to the
sound of Il greasy old fiddle. She
wanted to marry 4 duke. She might
have compromised on a lord, but an
ordinary member of IN ordinary legis-
lature was below the ''last chance
mark.
Mrs. Hcnniiin was said to he q good
old soul. She was Il kind Of egg and
but,ct miser. Her late husband often
said that she would get up at night
and after gloatlng over her eggs in
numerous recounts, atiectionatcly pat
her butter. She was Il kind Odd lady,
and every winter gave the circuit ri
der a pair of home-knit socks.
II say what are you two quarreling
about:o" continued the old lady.
MADAM replied Mr.. Bucksnort
Ham, 81 have asked your daughter to
be my wife and she has refused
IVY, Puss, how can you be so
rude?"
Miss Puss firtcd herself into a pas
sion.
.'Why should marry him, mother?
What can he promise me?h
HE Il promise to make you a
good living. child. That's what he
can promise"
"a goou living the young woman
contenlptuously repeated. ''What do
| care about good living? Think that
all | care about is to sit down and eat?
A dog can make a good living"
II can promise you more than that"
said Mr.. Ham. II am going to be a
candidate for the senate. A recent
amendment to the constitution of the
United States-though Idon't suppose
you cver read politics-says that each
state senator shall be q lord with the
privilege of selecting any name he may
see fit. BY marrying me you would
become lady so-and-so, according to
the name we might select. If l am
elected, l shall name my farm Cotton
bloom. Then l shall be known as
Lord Cottonbloom-an original and
howery zane. OF curse III not press
would like to become Lady Cotton
WOOu, ~ IL Sou pSlSiSt III Noul iCioShts
l will lay my title ut the feet of some
other woman
claw, Puss. do you hear that?'
exclaimed the old lady.
..Of course | hear it, maw," replied
the young lady. II have always re-
spected Mr.. Ham. and have never
refused to listen to him. l knew that
the law had passed. and | very we'll
knew that should Mr.. Ham desire
! it. he could 90 up into the house of
lords instead OF remaining in the
l house of commons"
! "Well. ladies' SAID Mr.. Bucksnort
Ham. 81 must go out and formally
announce myself as Il candidate.
Practically, l shall. have no opposition,
but it is better to show myself to the
people,
t don't be in q hurry" tho old lady
remarked.
/ ooh. no, there is no need of making
so short Il visit" said the young lady.
| on see you again soon" replied
tie future lord of , ottonbloom.
CHAPTER II.
The friends OF Mr.. Ham wondered
Z at his admiration Of Miss Puss Henri.
lin. The neighborhood. or rs the say
, ing goes, the woods, were full of bet.
tar lnnEipy rirl. than she Spmnfinpe