The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1885-09-12
WESLEY AND HIS WIFE.
h Great Preacher Figuring as an VI
Jector in His Marital Relations.

Jector in His Marital Relations.
Great men are not always fortunate
in their wives. Here is a letter written
by John Wesley to his wife, which q
correspondent has brought to light.
John Wesley was married in February
l75l, to Mrs. Mary Vazille,, "a mer-
chants widow in Threadneedle street., y
who possessed q fortune of about $780,
600, secured to herself and her four
children. He was forty-eight, she forty
one. His biographer, the Rev. L. Tyer-
man. says Of their marriage that it
"was, in a high degree, an act Of folly;
and. properly enough. to the end of
of life. both of them were made to sui
fer q serious penalty
CoLEFoRp, October %, 1759.-Dedr Molly
f ! Tils t %ah. yop d ssmPIy f II you pla' remove oSe
them, well. If not, I am but where !
was. I dislike your showing any one my let
ters and private papers without my leave.
This never did any Good yet, either to you or
me, or any one. 1t only sharpens and embit-
tiers your own Spirit. And the same Effect It
naturally has upon Others. The same as it
would have upon me, but that tby the Grace
of Cod / do not think of it. 1t can do no
may drive me further of. And should you
do as you SO often threaten me, then the mat
ter is over. / know what l have to do. In
all this you are fighting against yourself:
You are frustrating your W purpose. If
you want me to love you. You take just the
wrong way. No one was ever forced TO love
another. 1t cannot be: Love can only be
won by s%oftness:. Foul means avail nothing.
But you say, Il have tried Fair Means and
they did not succeed" If they do not none
will. Then you have only to say, 'This Evil
is of the Lord: am Clay in his hand"
dislike. 2. Not having the Command of my
own House mot being at liberty to invite even
my nearest Relations so much as to Drink a
like, 8, The being myself a Prisoner in my
own house; the having my Chamber door
watched continually so that no Person can
20 'oa N or o %isiik Sat ! s TSn b as na hnt so nris Goeq
at large, even when | go abroad, inasmuch
as you are highly disguised if do not give
you an Account of every place l go to and
every person with whom | converse. | dis
My House is not my Castle. ! can not call
even my Study, even my Bureau my own,
They are liable to be plundered every day.
You say, 81 plumber you of noting but Pa
pers." am not sure of that. How is it pos
slble l should? l miss money, too, and he
that will steal a Pin will steal Il Pound. But
were it so, q Scholars Papers are his Treas
ure; My Journal in particular. But ] took
only such papers as relate to Sarah Ryan
and Sarah Crosby" That is not true: What
are Mr.. Landey's Letters to Them? Besides,
you have taken Parts of my Journal which
relate to neither one nor the Other. | dis
like, q: Your Treatment of my Servants tho
indeed they are not properly mine). You do
all that in you Lies to make their Lives a
Burden to them. You brow-beat, harass,
rate thom like Dogs, make them afraid to
speak to me. You treat them with such
Haughtiness, Sternness, Sourness, SurlinesS,
Immature. as never were known IN any House
of mine for near Il dozen years You forget
even Good breeding, and use such coarse
Language as BELTS none but a Fishwife.
dislike, 7, Your talking against me behind
my back, and that every Day and almost
every Hour of the Day; making my Faults
your Conversation. dislike, s. Your Stand
ering me, laying at my charge things which
you know are false. Such are Ito go but "A
few days back That | beat you" Which you
with Sarah Ryan, which you told Sarah
Rigby: and that | required you, when we
were first married, never to sit In my pres
encc without my leave. Which you told
Mrs. Lee, Mrs Fry, and several others; and
stood to it before my face. ] dislike, 0,
your common Custom of saying things
not true. To instance only in two
or three Particulars. You told Mr.. Ireland
NJ Vanilla learnt Spanish in Il Fortnight"
You told Mr.. Fry Mrs. Ellison was the
told Mrs. Ellison you never said any such
thing; you never charged her with it." You
also told her THAT | had laid a Plot to serve
You as Susannah was served by the two
Elders | dislike, 10, your extreme, i'm
measurable Bitterness to all who endeavor
to defend my Character las my Brother
Joseph Jones, Clayton Carthy), breaking out
even into foul unmannerly Language; such
as ought not to detile a Gentlewoman's lips,
if she did not believe one Word of the Bible.
And now; Molly, what would any one I'D
wise you to, that has Il real Concern for your
Happiness? Certainly, |, To show, read,
touch those Letters no more; if you did not
restore them to their proper owner: 2, To
allow me the of my own House,
with free Leave to invite thither whom l
please: 3, To allow me my Liberty there
that any who will may come to me, without
Let or Hindrance: 4, To let me go where |
please, and to whom / please, without giving
an Account to any: 8, To assure me,yOu will
take no moro of my Papers, nor anything of
mine, without my Consent: q, To treat all
the servants where you are whether you
like them or not with Courtesy and HUI
mainly, and not speak. If you speak at alb to
them,a as well as with others, with gOod,nature,
and Good manners: 7, To speak no evil of
me behind my back; s. Never to accuse me
falsely: Q, To be extremely cautious Of say
ing anything that is not strictly true. both as
to the Matter and Manner; and 10, To avoid
all BITTERNESS Of Expression. till you can
avoid all Bitterness of Spirit.
These are the Adviccs, which | now give
you in the Fear of God, and in tender Love
to Your Soul. Nor can | give you a Stronger
Proof that ! am, your atfectionate husband.
JOHN Wesley.
Mary life ended ten years before
her husbands. She died in 1881, after
having made him miserable for thirty
years. Wesley survived her, living to
the ripe age of eighty-eight. In Il
worldly way he had gained nothing by
his marriage. 1t lost him his fellow
ship at Oxford and at least temporarily
alienated his brother Charles and his
wife.-N. Y. Critic.