The Hazlehurst signal., 1885-09-03
AN OLD RgpRoBATE.
Tells OF the Tricks He Played Upon MIS-
Anxious WIFE.

Anxious WIFE.
"You see, Martha got into the
habit of sitting up for me ut, an
early age, and she can't break il
off. ! couldn't persuade her to
60 to bed and mind her own bus
mess, so / studied on the matter.
We 1.-Two in one of the center
houses of Il block of fivc-story and
an attic buildings. Theirs scut-
ties in the roof of all of them, and
l persuaded Mr.. Grecnup who
lives in an adjoining house to Let
me in his house last night about
/ o'clock, and / won't up through
tho scuttlc and over TO mine, and
so down into, our bed room. !
could see Martha, from the head
of the stairs, sitting in tho front
room eyeing the clock with Il look
that was a very tart chrome. But
! undressed and quitely got into
the bed, and there / lay quietly
awaiting development. Every
now and then ia hear Martha
give a short fidgcty cough. Then
I'd hear her get up and prance
around the room a little, and by
and bv 60 to the front windows
and slam the shutters.
"After I'd lain there about an
hour / heard her get up and 60
stand out OH tho front steps for Il
good five minutes. Then she
came in and slammed the door
aud locked it and commenced
comming up stairs. Every other
step she'd say: '0h, the wretch.
Won't give it to him ! know
where. .hc is! He needn't think to
deceive mo! Oh, the william !!
Bout the time she had nearly got
to the landing ! think she must
have seen the light streaming
out of the door that / left ajar.
l could hear her stop and then /
commenced to snOre was afraid
to look, yon know, but ] could
hear her cautiously come up to
the door and look ~. Well sir I'd
give my pension from .h., ~-- =.
1875 to have seen her about the
time she saw it was me. I'll bet
it was fun. But was ,fraid to
do anything but snoreI Then
she came into the room, and, by
the way she breathed AMI stood
around had to nearly bite my
tongue off to keep u straight face
OH me. could feel that she sat
down in q chair and was dumb
founded. ! never let on but kept
on snoring like thunder hut when
she kicked over a chair / turned
and pretended to wake u kinder
dazzled like and says:
"Why, Martha, dcar;dn'tyou
come to bed yct?"
Jarphly said she, when did you
! come in?"
"Why must he four or five
hours ago. Don't you remember
when i told you not to sleep again
in the rocker, but to come upto
bed?" and / turned over aud
professed to go tn sleep again.
"She never made my reply,
but acted in n dazzled bovildered
sort of II way, and whe, she got
to bed / could tell shc didn't
sleep wink for three hours.
"Tbis morning it was fun to
watch Martha. i could hardly
keep straight face. At the
breakfast table and all the time
l was about the house she'd eye
mo when she thought 1 wasn't
looking; then when / notice her
she'd turn away and bc awful
busy ut something She caught
me kind of grinning once, and,
by George 1 thought the cxplo-
sion was about to come, but it
didn't, though the look of blank
unfathomable suspicion shc wore
OH her face all the time was the
greatest show on Garth. It nerly
broke me up, and Two laughed
till my ribs ache ever since. !
know it won't last. Iknow there s
u day of rcpnnting q coming and
the thermometer is going up
clear out of sight in the Jarphly
family. But who's going after
trouble? It comes soon enough
without hunting it, aud I'm going
to enjoy that scuttle in the roof