Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-11-08
BRIGHT BITS.

AN EXCHANGE tells "liow TO Boil Onions"
What we ant is a recipe for boiling the man
who eats them.-Bu'ia9ton free Press.
The high linen collar, so loved by the dude,
pronounced unhealthy 1t never looked
very well, that's a fact Philadelphia Press.
a SCHOOL MA'AM OF Butte county. Cal. has
written TO he superintendent asking Tor pro-
motion. and suggesting that. If there Is no
vacancy, he should assist her in 'oustlng some
old fossil. "-Geolo0ist.
A GENTLEMAN in a closely througed dry
goods store on State street the other evening
had the misfortune to tread on a lady's skirt
The lady instantly turned around, her face
flushed with veXatiOn and fire flashing from
her eyes. But, noticing the stranger, she
quietly said BEG pardon, sir; thought il
was ms husband, and was going to be dread
fully angry. Tele1rGm.
A CORRESPONDENT asks us whether there is
anyI lyme for the word Mugwump. Probably
there Is:
In June we see the festive bug jump,
But IN November sklps the Mugwump.
Or this may suit better:
Hill had of votes a snug lump,
But none of them were Mugwump.
-Ne3o York St1r
IT ALL DEPENDS on THE POINT OF VIEW
Hes as firm as rock"
"WhoP"
"Tne President. A lot of fellows are trying
to get me out Of office, but they can't bulge
him."
I've found him as obstinate as mule"
Flows that?"
''why, a lot of fellows have been trying to
get me into office, but they can't bulge him"
Chicago Ne10s.
do HAVE to go in there with all those
cattle7' asked stylishly- dressed woman,
with dog in her arms, as she looked into a
crowded passenger coach on day train with
out sleeper. mo, ma'am, you don't have
to-" replied the conductor. "Wen, what car
do? l don't see any other car" "Why,
ma'am, you can wait at the station here till
that tram on the siding goes and then You
can have whole stock car to yourself" She
went and sat dOWn.-NerchdHt IrdUeIer.
MISTER" said a demure- looking person,
approaching man with a st. Louis foot,
would you do me little favOr?'
NO, can't spare any money to-day
II don't want any money, sir, want to be
kicked. and kicked hard.'
"What for2"
why. Pm Flower"
"WhO's Flower"
"Why. the man who declined the Demo
crate " animation for Lieutenant Governor"
-Eechdngs.
A YOUNG LADY was walking with gentle
man rather Older than herself. He saw upon
her satin neck a black object. Ii mOved-it
WIS an lnsect-genus DuLeS, Taking the adj
vantage to which men with grav hair are so
nronr-a young man would have been more
tim d-he At once removed the insect with his
lnger and thumb. The young lady turned at
the touch il qurlngly. pardon me-" said
her companion, but you had a flea on your
neck" The adys bowed mock disp easure.
should not have removed it?" asked he,
anNiously. "Ye-e-es." she replied, hesitat-
ngly. but you might have called it mos
quito. tladelDhia Nea0s.
on. what has become OF the Mugwump bird
In his weather of wind and snow.
And does he roost as high as we heard
He roasted year ago?
A year ago and his plumes were red
As gf q
But in the year they've changed, tits said.
To The oluest OF bilious blues
A year ago and this beautiful thing
Warhled in careless glee,
But now The tune he is forced to sing
Is pitched in minor key.
It's oh, we sigh, for the times gone by
When the Mugwump lived 10 laugh
When, coy and shy. ne roasted high.
And couldn't be caught with chat.
And it's oh, we say, for the good old day
Which never again may come
When the MuRwump threaded his devious
way.
And whisted his lumpty tum
-Chiedgo Nescs.