Morning journal and courier., 1885-05-27
STRAIGHT.

The woman QueSt1On-1S my nat on straight?-Somervile Journal.
 Tennyson is still improving. Each new poem is shorter than the last.-Philadelphi Call.
 The liberty bell has come to the conclusion that it must have been cracked when it went to New Orleans s-Philadelphi Call.
 A poet says "Woman is the Sunday of man. He probably had Eve in his mind, as she was the beginning of the weak.-Yon- kers Statesman.
 ssMr. Jenkinson's wife must be awful jeal- ous!' said Miss Smith; Che gave me his seat in the horse car, and when thanked him he begged me not to mention it."-Boston Transcript.
 ssWhen you go forth to do good deed put on the slippers of silence" says someone. Yes: and when you go home from the club late at night you should do the same thing Boston Post.
 A German paper says proposal has been made to found 'fRichard Wagner Musk schule'' in Bayreuth. We should say that a spelling -schule would be more valuable.- Lowell Courier.
 You'd like to know how man writes fun ny things, would you, Cecelia. Well, dear, he just sits down, dips his pen into the ink and writes. Anybody can write funny stories It is no trouble at all. And the on- ly thing that is in any way difficult is to know what to write.-Boston Post.
 Probably the best thing the Bible revisers have done is the throwing out of the request of Job that his adversary should write a book. It has long been recognized, even by dull people, that there are too many books, and that the Cible should contain nothing en- couraging, even in the remotest manner, their accumulation.-Courie Journal.
 Small grocer-t'Yes, do more business in the winter than in the summer"
 Customer-"How do you account for that? People have to eat all the year round."
 'fWell, you see, folks just run in for one thing, but if they stay long enough they see other things they want"
 "Yes"
 ssWell, in the winter the molasses runs SC slow they always have lots of time to look around. d."-Philadelphia Call
 "rYoung gentlemen" said the lecturer in chemistry, "coal exposed to the elements loses 10 per cent of it's weight and power This is due to the action of the alkali con- stituents of - "But what if there is 6 dog sleeping near the coal, professorF ssNone of your levity, young man; this IS g serious matter" ssThat's what dad thought when 72 per cent of his coal pile disappear ed during three nights of exposure. Ther he asked my advice as student of chemist ", and told him to buy dog He bought a dog with bay window teeth and the spring halt in his upper lip, and now we don't lose per cent. of our coal month. That's th' kind of practical chemist I am. Now g on with your theory. Chicago Herald. Birmingham is in turmoil shad- fishing | The law provides that no nets or seines shall b | dam and the junction with the Naugatuck. But tn fish commission, which has a right to take shad 10 shad, giving them as payment the male fish an such females as are not ripe, about 6g per cent grievous monopoly and undertook to fish for them | Selves have been arrested
 | The Northfleld Creamery company are pushin V 9Hog 1s %he R length, and will be fitted up with it's necessary ma chine company. The company is to be co,opers tive. The cream is to be raised by what is know I as the Cooley process.'' and gathered from tn farmers by the company's teams, leaving the skir
 milk to be fed out to stock on the place and th h
 farmer undisturbed in his work and relieved of tn
 annoyance of marketing his butter or the necesslt
 of milk every day A steady cash income Will ais | be one of the advantages of this system William Adams, the last of the trio of bunco mel
 was on Tuesday released from jail Sew HoTk ha a1
 is doubted if any of the sharpers ever appear fo
 trial in which event the county treasury VIII DC el
 ndams IT oi and os was depoed wit
 the clerk of the Superior court.-Hartfero Cou 1 ant
 Iingford destroyed five barns and other outhous'
 belonging to Alexander Hall. The barns containe
 large amount of hay, grain and farming utensii
 Loss, g. 800; insurance. $1 800.
 The Seventeenth Connecticut volunteers will ho
 their annual reunion this year In Stamford. | Bishop McMahon will dedicate St. Mary's cem | tery at Norwalk next Saturday.
 Rev. Fathers Frederick and McElroy of StPetel church, Hartford, engaged in taking census l the parish.
 , Mansfield post, G. A. R., of Middletoyp was vel , | went to Maromas and decorated soldiers gray
 there with appropriate exercises. In the evening marched to the Methodist church and listened to
 appropriate discourse from Pastor Kelly | Monday it attended the funerals of Comrades Da , l iels and Douglas Commander Pelton has issll
 orders for the proper observance of Decorat : day.