Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-03
BfsIGHT BITS.

MoNSTROsITGEs find freak quarters in the
dlme museum. Boston bulletin.
OUR insane punster speaks OF the man with
Ihe squeaklng boots as the coming walk loud.
-Bostoa TranScript.
.PfARNELLTE to friend in whisper:
-Ihere's head coming up above the crowd"
Friend-Whist! whose is itY" Faith, ] think
it's Salisbury's" Never mind whose it is,
hit 1t. F@tts6arG Chronicle.
NOBODY has ever yet given to the world the
names OF the two gentlemen who are always
5haKlng hands so cordially on The state seal.
~ IS believed, however, that one Of them is
Colonel and That the other is a Judge.-LOatis-
0'tte CouTaer-J0urRGI.
WHEN is the best time to 90 fshlng?" asks a
correspondent OF an anglers journal. Such
ignorance is deplOrable The best time to 20
fishing s when your wife begins to tear up
the carpets as prelude to house cleaning
Dr66e'S Ird0ellsrs' -HUgGsja6.
AT the meeting of the New England Bap-
ueu missionary Convention, Rev. II. n. Jeter
pronounced ice cream "a demOraliZing sub
stance It is inferred that after Rev Mr.
JeJer and his ladies' ate their cream, he made
the startling discovery that he left his pocket
DOCK at nome in his other trousers pocket
\ 0rrtstO1on Herald.
A PAPER gave an account of a society event.
ana IN speaking OF one beautiful lady, Of
quite large proportions, II said: Mrs. -
possessed form that Juno might envy"
AAiO ONAe1l went uOulb, ana lBII q subordinate
TO get out the paper, and the next morning
he read in his paper that "Mrs. - possessed
form that Jumbo might envy, "-EGch0nge.
A DENTIST advised man to have tooth
taken out, assuring him that if he inhaled gas
he would feel no pain. "What is the effect of
the 8asf asked the man, sit makes you in
sensible" said the dentist, land you don't
know anything that takes place" The man
TOOK out mia money. ''Oh, never mind the
fee until afterward" remarked the dentist
nj ba
Il only wanted to see how much money
had ."-Ne9O York Sun.
WHAT O'DONovAN DREADs.-
ION, alasl" cried jeremiah,
AS with woe his head hung,
II can stand a Woman's fire,
Bnt weaken at her tongue.
"When she points a loaded pistol
At my face, then fear lack;
For It's just as clear as crystal
That she'll hit me in the back.
81 can bear the pain Of bullet,
But woman's tongue l dread,
W hen she cackle54l like a pullet
wet with rain she cannot SHEDS
when a saucy woman's sour
And is spoiling for n fight,
Then her tongue has far more mower
Than ton of DYNAMITE
Poetic license. In place Of the phrase mad
as a wet hem" -Eachan0e,
ARCHIBALD ADAMS, teamster, who re-
sides on the Brownsville road near Pitts
burg, had an Interesting and exhiarating
experience yesterday morning. A week ago
Mr.. Adams bought q pair of plan, ordinary
everyday mules at the horse market. Now
Mr.. Adams is a careful man and has a kind
heart for animals. So when he noticed in the
farmers column of a newspaper day or so
ago that II was an excellent thing to wash
the hOOfs Of horses occasionally IN hot water
be came TO the conclusion that he would try
its beneficial effects on those mules He cot
pail Of hot water yesterday morning and
hied himself away to the stable. The mules
blnked at him with q mild. lauguid air
fllrted their little tails about pleasantly and
awaited their masters will. Mr.. Adams Get
the pail of water down at the rear feet of one
of the mules. The mule kept on looking
pleasant. Then Mr.. Adams lifted up one Of
the hoOfs and carefully put it in the bucket
-- -- ! = *-Ne1o York Journal