Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1885-08-12


to be a sharp dealer in stocks. and that
he has made some pretty good hauls."
Good hauls!" Smith repeated. II
don't believe he has ever made split
ter. As he has nothing to put into
stocks, how in thunder can he get. any
thing out OF themP"
"But l have always understood Jones
TO be rather heavy dealer" the law
yer said.
Heavy dealer be hangedv' Jones re-
piled. "He stands before the bulletin
boards in front of the offices of the
brokers, and blows by the hour about
the good turns he has just made. Never
a stock goes up but he has just bought
500 or 1000 shares. and never stock
goes down but he has Just sold in the
nick of me. All this me he does
not own share of anything, except,
perhaps. some wildcat that Is oil the
Board. He's the boss liar OF the Com
stockr'
A sound from the closet as of the
grating of teeth reached the ear OF the
lawyer. He smothered chuckle and
proceeded with the witness: ''Oh, but
you must be wrong, MIR. Smith. You
must be wronging Mr.. Jones in what
YOU say. Mr.. Jones dresses well, and
lives well generally; therefore he must
be making something IN stocks"
mot splitter!' said Smith. Not
splitter, tell you'll He owes every
body that VIII trust him. He owes his
tailor, owes at his restaurant, owes for
his lodgings, and would have been at
the end of his string long ago. but that
his landlady and some other fools be-
lieve him when he blows about his big
stock transactions. He'll 90 10 where
the woodb ne tw meth very soon. You
can put Jones down for irregular dead
beat. / shouldn't wonder # he had al
ready skipped the town. l have not
seen him for day or two. Besides,
hear that he has managed to get hold
of the little savings of his landlady,
some $500"
'Liar!' was heard in a muflled roar,
as Jones rushed from the closet with
uplifted chair, bristling and foaming
with rage.
Smith bounded from his seat at the
lawyers center table. with eyes Cog
Cling at the sudden appar ton of
Jones from quarter so unexpected,
and in looks and att tude so venomous
and threatening. He saw that the dogs
OF war had been slipped. and that it
was TO be war to the knife. Impelled
by the instinct of self-prescrvaton
Smith grasped an ink bottle from the
table and opened the battle by hurting
it with all IA 5 force at Jones head.
Jones neatly stopped the missile with
the bottom of his chair. The bottle
exploded with a crash, and shower of
ink flooded the carpet anu SCATTERED
the walls. AS Smith reached for a
paper WEI ht, Jones let drive at him
W / his char Smith ducked his head
below the table just in tine. and the
chair crashed into large mirror.
Lawyer Coke loudly called upon the
combatants to cease the fray. but their
blood was up and the vo ces of both
were still for war. They fired away at
each other from opposite sides of the
table. around which they were dancing.
with books. inkstands and all else thai
comes to hand. Jones had just fired
at Smith plaster bust of some great
legal light, which missed and crashed
to atoms in the remains of the shat
tered m rror, when the latter Sc zcd
upon bronze gladiator and whirlcd it
about his head, yelling: Now I'll
fetch your
At sight of missile so formidable
Jones made sudden plunge under the
table. probably with the intent on of
graspng Smith by the legs and land
ing him upon bis back. Smith, how
ever, saw the dodge Just as he was in
kn IS E,.,, w no ola 10
tor, and, reservlng his ammunition,
stopped beneath the table to whack
Jones's head with it, Find NC that
there was not room in which to sw ne
his weapon, Smith contented himself
by trying to punch it into Jones's face
and eyes. Smith soon caused free
flow OF claret from Jones' no and
from cut he made over his ght eye,
when the latter managed to get hold OF
the base of the statuette, and by sud-
den push sent the head of the glad ator
into Smiths mouth, smashing N one or
two front teeth. THIS unexpected re-
turn fire, and the pain it inil cted,
caused Smith to make an involuntary
attempt to rise to his feet, capsizing the
table and tumblng it clear over Jones.
In moment both men were upon their
feet and at it, q la Heenan and Savers,
both as bloody as butchers.
Finding that words alone were I'M
needed, the man of law rushed in TO try
to separate the combatants by muscu-
lar force. He arrived between the pa I
Just in time to receive left-handed
plumper on the nose from the blood
blinded Jones. Smarting from the blow
IN II han al
and shirt front. Lawyer Coke ran to a
desk and brought forth a revolver,
threatening to shoot dead the man who
struck another blow. Observing the
bloody condition of the disciple oil
Blackstone and the deadly look in h S
eve. usually SO mild, the combatants
fell back and ceased hostilit es.
At the muzzlc of his cooked revolver
Coke ordered Smith into an adjoining
room, where he caused HIN to wash
the blood from his face and hands,
and then escorted him down the stairs
and out by n rear passage and door.
As Smith took II departure he swore
that he never would aga n darken the
LAWYERS door. He declared that he
had been led INTO trap; that an am
buscade had been prepared for h m;
that Coke had concealed Jones in the
closet with malice aforethought, and
that he had designcdly been led INTO
abusing him. This had been done that
at the proper moment Jones m ght
dart out and assault him. He had
heretofore thought pretty well of Coke,
but this trcachcrous affair ended their
friendship forever. forever, sir!' 1t is
the ''last feather"
Smith being dismissed, the lawyer
returned to Jones and set him to wash
ing away all removable traces of the
combat. When about to escort him
down stairs, Coke turned and sad
MIR Jones, before you go I'll trouble
you for the five dollars | have won o.
you"
"You will? You have the check &c
ask itP Mr.. Littleton Coke. you'll nevel
see the color of five dollars from me