St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1885-07-02
Episodes of Farm Life.
BY HON. FRANK LITTLE, KALAMAZOO.

The farmer should be an honest
mantle nOblest work of God. His
life is joyous round of blowing and
sowing, hOeing and reaping.
He is a man surrounded with toll,
and acquainted with middIe-men,
drought, mildew and rust.
A deadly murrain stalketh at mid
day among his hOcbs; and he sendeth
their hides to the tanner, and their
bodies to the canning factories.
The dark shadow of uncertainty
hroOds over his harvests, and his eldest
son marries the hired girl and com
mences housekeeping in the corn
barn.
He sells the product of his fields to
the commission merchant, and straight
way invests and loses the whole
amount in the "bucket- shop"
He joins IA political organization and
contributes to its support, and is re-
warded by being sent as a delegate to
county convention.
He mortgageth his home to buy an
adjoining field, and thereafter becomes
the CO. partner of the mOney-Iendcr.
He sits in luxurious ease Oh the
fence at the end of the row, and lunch
es upon homemade gingerbread hot
from the domestic oven.
Although lord of his manor and gov
ernOr of his provinces, he is besct by
Lightning rod vendors, book agents,
and tramps, who Overrun his premises.
Dwelling in the midst OF perennial
delights, he is exempt from the allure
ments of vice, aud is envied by those
miserable beings who prccariously live
by their wits in cities and villages.
The gentleman farmer suhsiSteth
himself upon Jersey milk and spring
chickens, and regaleth himself with
the fragrance of new mOwn hay, and
the aroma of his horse-stables.
He rideth sulky-piOw and self
binder under a muslin canopy instead
of stumbling on foot over the clOds of
of the valley and weareth hickory
shirt, butternut pants, 0W-hide boots
and unshaven face without molesta-
ton or abuse.
His barns and stOre-houses are filled
with plenty ; and he subscribes and
pays for the county paper, that he may
store his mind with useful knowledge.
Rising early with the lark betimes at
-four o'clock in the morning, he stirreth
up the maid servant ont of her lair;
while he warmeth himself and greaseth
his boots 10y the kitchen fire.
He breaktasteth by candle light, and
doeth his chores after nighU-fall while
the sad and weary wife of his bosom
and mother of his children longs for
the peaceful happy days of her child
hood.
He murmureth and is sore distressed
as his fields are deluged with rain and
anon he beateth his breast and dnsteth
his garments at the severity of the
drought, saying, ALAS my crops are
ruined
Verify, the farmer is creature of
destiny. He Is of the earth earthly.
His pastures become parched and vel
low: potato bugs ravage his fields,
rains mildew his wheat; the frost nip
peth his corn, aud the assessor sad
dleth him with CALLING taxes.
He visiteth town dressed in blouse
and blue jeans, and men call him a
tramp :" he is shaven and clad in
broad cloth and fine linen. and people
say behold the dude -
He keepeth his buildings insured for
twenty years. and they remain I'M
harmed; then earelesSly letteth his
policy lapse one day, and the same
night fire destroy eth his home.
His daughter marrieth man of cul
ture and great wealth, and becomes
the proud mistress of a palatial home
ia few short years she retuIueth pen.
niiess to her fathers house, and he con-
structeth a lean to, to shelter her and
her children.
He purchaseth Jersey bull aud es-
corteth him home, and straightWay the
industrious animal taketh the entire
control of tle premises.
He anlargeth his borders by selling
out his farm aud moving to Kansas,
and there slaketh his thirst with alkaIi
water and corn juice.
\ cyclone maketh his acquaintance
at noon day and sweepeth habitation,
oHtbuildings, stock aud fences into
Missouri, while the lives Of his dis
contented wife aud terror stricken Off
spring are sheltered and preserved in II
''dug-Out."
He amasseth fortune aud ut the
end of his days maketh his will and
dietiI and, in the contest over his es-
tate, the lawyers of his widow and 81
his first wife's children finally take
possession of and divide his inheri-
lance.
Sending Himself Postal Cards.
| Thurlow Weed, used To strengthen
his memory by recalling in the evening
l and a his wifi. in, a.