Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-05-15
BRIGHT BITS.

A RUMoR in London is to the effect that
Mary Anderson IS soon to marry the Marquis
OF harrington. The Markee ie 50 years cid,
and has beard like stable broom.-BOaton
Post.
ga GOOD PAINTRR?" said the picture agent.
u should say she was. The other day she
painted picture Of a dog and picture of
cat and hung them up IN our back room.
When the cat saw the dog it broke the frame
trying to get away, and the dog barked so
loud we couldn't do any business In the
store. '-E1cAaa0e.
"WHAT a stupid play this is, Henry; l have
half a mind to go home" "Why, Clara, this
IS the fourth time you have seen it. and. you
coming again" Yes, l know; bnt I've got
nv new spring bonnet on, and they're too
stingy to turn on their old gas between the
acts."-ChtcdgO Herald.
WHEN a lady condescends to practical
joke it generally is a neat one. NJ. Boncourt
the rich financier, was very stingy to his wife
IN the matter of pin money. One day lady,
closely velled ana very anxious not to he
recognized, called upon him and borrowed a
large sum, leaving her diamonds as pledge.
1t was his wife.-Brooklyn EAGLE.
LOSE MONEY! Why, have lost more money
than You ever saw. Five years ago l lost
$l,000010 in Paris "
How was thatP'
There wasn't a single electric light in that
city. Not one"
''How did that lose you monev?"
How? BY not supplying the city with cleo
trio lamps.'
Yes, but they weren't invented at that
time"
II know it. That's how lost money. By
not inventing them.-Neio York Graphic.
AN eminent scientific man lately paid a
visit to an old college chum. a minister in
Perthshire. The minister, being asked about
the visit, said: "He came to see me here some
time ago and stayed q day or two. He Is ter
ribly unsound." You had a tough argument.
dare say" "'Deed had we; he is awful
clever. and we sat up half the night debating.
he Is very unsound." But you felt yon had
the best of the argument didn't youp' "Weel,
| am not vera sure that made much impress
sion-he is awful clever; but l was upsides in
the mOrnin'." How" Il pat him Until my
prayer" -Nel0 York Sun.
THE McGusbes are getting on famously with
their house cleaning. The moQuettes and
the ADMINISTERS have all been whacked and
slammed until the dust has returned to dust,
and the furniture has all been misplaced in
gorgeous array. Still there are many little
nice points of detail that Rosalind must at
tend to personally.
Don't you think, ma, dear" said she, affec-
tionately, ''that we need new portieres be-
tween the parlors? The old ones are so very
"Rosalind," said the mother, with no little
feeling, those pOrtieres are not familiar to
me. Stay in the cellar kitchen from Monday
morning until Saturday night. as ] do. and
they would look very well to YOU" Christian
40 Work.
THE WASHING OF THE SHIRT
In ecstacy | strOve to make
hst-rack of the sky,
With the universe for vestibule
And the stars for hat-pegs high;
Aud in the workshop of Good Luck
] thought 10 hn1 employ.
While gOssped with the Infinite
Through the telephone of JOY.
Yet the stars are just es far away
As though 70 never sung;
And the Infinite seems somewhat deaf
TO the music OF my tongue,
But measly cold is on my chest
As tribute Of the Spring,
And TO lie IN bed while my shirt is washed
Is a blamed unpleasant thing.
-WQSAingt0n Ratchet.