The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1885-03-20

cnutlOuSiy mOlBteneQ the nanukorcnleI
with the chloroform, letting the wetted
portion hang down well over his nose.
He breathed rather more stertorously
than before, but otherwise made no
! sign. Presently the stertorous breath
ing grew fainter and fainter, and at
last ceased altogether. All was over.
and began to consider what would be
the best method of communicating the
unfortunate occurrence to the rest of
tho household. hesitated whether to
give the alarm myself, and say that my
uncle had been seized with an apoplec-
tic fit, or to quit the room, and leave
somebody else to make the painful dis
covery. / finally decided on the latter
course, and was just leaving the room
when the supposed dead man suddenly
sat up with snort. ''Pah! Pishi Pooh!
What this horrid smell of rotten APP
ples?" Then, finding it was his own
handkerchief that smelt, he flung it
from him. saying: Benny, you rascal.
you've been up to your larks again.
You've been putting some of your nasty
patchouli stuff on my handkerchief. I
declare it has given me quite head
ache"
was only too glad to snatch at the
suggestions; owned the soft impeach-
ment, and promised not to play such n
trick again. My uncle had another
glass of gin-and-water in consideration
of his headache, and we retired to rest.
How my uncle slept can't say, but l
had uncomfortable dreams of a public
ceremonial, in which Mr.. Bartholomew
Binns (very drunk), gentleman in
clerical attire, and myself played prom
inent parts.
came down to breakfast feeling hor-
ribly seedy and low-spirited. My I'M
Gle, on the contrary, was quite jovial,
and in unusual spruce array.
"What swell you are this morning"
/ remarked.
'Ah. I'm a moneyed man to-day"
he replied. I'm going into the city to
draw my annuity"
"Your what?" exclaimed.
"My annuity. The fact is, Benny,
my boy, you and / are such gay young
dogs that found l was living beyond
my income and dipping into the capt.
tai. That's the sort of amusement that
don't last long. you know, and like to
be on the safe side. So tie other day.
when l was in the city, just walked
into one of the big insurance offices and
sunk the little lot in an annuity. Five
hundred and ten pounds year they
gave me; so us long as L live, Benny,
my boy, you and l are safe of our little
pocket-money. By the time l 90 of
the hooks-which won't be for another
twenty years or SO, hope--no doubt
you'll be pockcting your thousand a
year, and won't want it.
Good heavens! what an escape l
had! If had carried out what now
felt to be my unnatural design, should
positively have been the poorer man,
instead of the richer, for my success.
But it will be lesson to me for
the future. Come what may, l have
made up my mind that VIII never at
tempt to assassinate anybody again.
my first murder shall also be my last.
Professionals may find assassination
pay. but am quite sure that amateurs
had better keep clear of it. At best it
is an expedient that can only be justi-
OF Judgment may place you in an eX-
tremely painful position. In my own
case for instance. the suppression of my
uncle, which appeared so eminentlv de-
sirable. would in reality have been
quite the reverse, and if had succeededi
should never have forgiven myself.
Henceforth l intend to devote my best
energies to cherish my worthy relatives
declining years, and keep him alive as
long as possibly can. l have already
suggested his devotng a reasonable
portion of his annuity to good heavy
insurance on his own life. If [ can
only induce him to do this my mind
will be at peace. At any rate, what
ever happens shall have done my
duty.-Angelo j. Le,ris, in BeigraUia.