The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-07-07


been a feeling that they were being hum
plugged And then, when the lecturer began
in a voice strong in the New England nasal
twang, but highly favored with q North of
Ireland brOgue, they were sure they was a
mistake somewhere The colonel began by
advancing to the fOotlights with as
much self-poise as a cowboy at the head
of herd, with about ten pounds of manu-
script in his hand He remarked in droll
tone of voice that he regretted extremely
having either lost or mislaid portion of his
notes, adding that he would do the best he
could to get along with such brief notes as
were left to him. The contrast between his
protestations and the size of the manuscripts
before him was sufficiently droH to make
everybody laugh, thereby establishing the
best of good feeling between the lecturer
and his hearers.
There were two difficulties, the colonel
said, that always confronted him in meet ing
strangers. In the first place his connection
with Texas Siftings invariably gave rise to
the impression that he was at all times SO
filed up with wit and humOr that he was
obliged to get up at night to let it off (which,
he begged to state, was not the caSe), and i'll
the second place he was almost always ex-
pected, hailing from Texas, to be armed to
the teeth and ready at any moment to shoot
the average citizen at sight. He trusted that
any inadvertence of his to kill a few of his
fellow citizens during the evening would be
generously overlooked, if not quite forgiven.
From this humorous introduction Col.
Knox proceeded to give careful dissertation
upon the relationship of wit to humor and
new Jokes to ''cheStnutS." He claimed that
wit is never unconscious, while humOr at its
best is always unintended. Col. Knox has
poor opinion of English appreciation of
humor. He read number of jokes from
Punch, begging his hearers to study them
closely and If possible catch on to them. He
c1fiSTasted them with current American wit
ticism in a very amusing manner. 'The
English" said he, ''have something which
passes current for humOr, and which is not,
1 assure you, to be laughed at" This genuine
witticism was inimitably uttered, and
brought down the house.
Referring to that species of humor which
relies upon an unexpected and terse cOnclu-
sion to a series of plain statements, as, for
example, John Henry loaded and discharged
q toy cannon yesterday; the funeral will take
place tomorrow" Col. Knox said: ''This
has been called distinctively American style
of fun. The truth is, it is older than America;
it is very venerable. If those of you who
have brought your Bibles with you will turn
to the twelfth verse of the sixteenth chapter
of II Chronicles you will find the following
statement: "And Asa in the thirty-ninth
year of his reign was diseased in his feet
until bis disease was exceedingly great; yet
in his disease he sought not the Lord but
turned to his physicians. And Asa slept
with his fathers" Immense laughter.)
Speaking of the lot of editors, Col Knox
said in early days, Texas was ''slow in set
Ting up which he thought perhaps &C
counted for the habits of the Texans to-day.
The audience heard nothing from Col.
Knox on the pedestal question, though the
lecturer said that he had it in his head dur
ing the entire evening.
The lecture throughout was bright and
witty, and the audience dispersed with their
preconceived ideas of Texan knocked higher
than Gilderoy's kite.
Col. Knox has had wonderful career. He
came to this country from the county Ar
moy, Ireland, in 1872. He is about 50 years
of age, but has lived double that period of
time. He has many peculiarities, is witty in
conversation, has but little brOgue of his ma
tive land, is fond of children and has been a
Sunday school superintendent The sewing
machine industry once claimed him as vic
tim In the way of experimenting the agents
of large concern, and it was while engaged
in this business that he probably collected
the library of moss-covered chestnuts, which
appears to be crammed into his brain.
One of Col. Knox's idiOsyncrasies is carry
ing around the country with him a large
trunk covered with the undreSSed hide of a
Texas steer. 1t is his constant companion at
home and on the road. At night when he
retires he neatly folds up his clothing and
lays it away on the trunk In the morning
he insists upon carrying it down stairs and
eating his breakfast while seated upon this
gentle reminder of wild Texas life.