The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1885-05-27
WIT AND PLEAS .NrRY.

ions.
A New York woman gave birth to four
boys last week. Already the benefits OF
Democratic administration are visible.
That settled him--Mssher: "Ah.h, permit
me to escort you, ladiesr Ladies: Ger.
;ainly; we're just going to get some oysters"
Do boys or girls make the most noise2 is
the latest conundrum. Turn mouse into
school.room, and it will be settied so quick
it will make your head swim.
so Mr.. Simpson is married" observed
Miss Brown. "Yss," replied Miss De Silva,
he married that odious little Mss Smith I
met them out wslSiDg yesterday" What
did you do?" Il congratulated her.''
Tie subject has fallen On wedding tours.
"I'd go to Switzerland" "rd GO TO Italy"
"For my part" said Mile. Tats. Il shouldn't
mind where we went-as long as thsre we're
plenty of tunnels"
"What fresh complexion Miss B. has"
safd gentleman to q young lady al party.
Yes" replied the lady, who was a rival OF
Miss B. 8, 1t is quite early in the evening
yet, you know, and 1t hasn't had time to
dry"
Twill. you have spring bottoms to those
tIousers?' said the city tailor as he took his
country customers measure. well, l rath-
er guess not" was the reply. "Spring hez
got so fur along you may as we'll make sum.
mer bottoms TO EN-"
"a scientist gays that the way to sleep is
to think of nothing" read Mrs. Smith in q
newspaper. IF that be true l should say
that you would sleep all the time. my dear"
said her husband. mo doubt, Mr.. Smith,
for think great deal OF you"
Things one would rather hsve left unssid
Miss Constance: I'm SO glad you think I've
improved in my playing of that nocturne of
yours, Herr Bemolski / hope to be- perfect
in it next time we meet! Herr 3. (gallRntly):
Achl Miss Gonschdsnce / hope vs shall
meet before zati-PuIch.
81 hear your wifs's left you. Mr.. Bhff."
"Ys-as, 'Riah's gone" LEFT for good2'
''Yasas, 'Riah's left for good" Don't it
make you feel kind Of anxious?" mo; 'Rlah
was q woman OF strong determination, l
amt got no anxieties. She won't CONS
Oack."-Detroit Free Press.
Her voice was harsh and she jswed all day,
TIL the man was crazy, as one may say.
From nom till night IL wss chin, chin, chin,
And people who conldnt help hearing the din
Knew well that the man had Q cross to bear,
And he cried in the midst of his wild despair
1--WE loved. I've loved her through good and i'll,
And with all her faults 1 would love her still "
II was unladylike for her TO make such
remark, but after her hearing her lord aud
master continually Dragging about his moth
eI's cooking YOU couldn't blame her for
asking him how it happened, il his mother
was such good cook. that her son was per
mitted to leave her hands only halt baked.
Charley wanted TO give Clara present,
but couldn't make mp his mind what il
should he; so the next time be called he
faDkly told her the difficulty under wh CO
he WIS lsboring Want 10 make me a pres
emit, Charley" Clara exclaimed in we'll dis
euised astOBjshment. why, Charley. yoo
foTgst ' ourself." Charley took the hint and
offered himself on the spot.
Barry Sullivan, the Irish tragedian. was
pisyiDg in Richard I'LL" some years aga at
Shrewsbury, 10 England. When the actor
| came to the lines: "A horse a horsel Ny
kingdom for q horsei' some ore in the pit
called out: "WoUldn't an ass do for you. Mr..
SuiiiyaD" Yes" responded the tr1gediaD,
turning quickly on the intsrruPter, please
cone round to the sisgs door,"
What flower is your faYorite, Miss? said
Globe Village dude who wore ten-csnt
buttonhole boquet to set of his manly beau
ty as ne promeuaded with Second street
girl at the Cricketers' bslI and endeavored to
make g floral mash. "Well, Mr.. -, the
only -four 1 care for is pure white heur-
that which ma buys by the barrel, and which
remincs me OF some men ! know in being
unpleasent.and pastry unless well bread"
The dude went out to see man.
Mrs. Sniverly is the wife OF the Captain of
New York militia company. she attended
review not long since at which her hus
band was the commanding officer. Mrs
when, after she got home. she was asked
what was the cause of her merriment, she re-
piled: 1T was the funniest thing in the
world to see my husband, who never dared
open bis mouth at home. ordering ali those
men about, and they doing just what he told
them 10 do"
Did you ever hear two married women
take leave of each other at the gate or 8 mild
EVENING" This is how they do it: "Good-bvl ;
Good-byl come down and see us soon," Il
will. Geod-by Geod.by Don't forget to
come soon." No, won't. Don't you for
get to come up" 'I won't. Be sure and
bring Sarah Jane with you next time" 81
she wasn't very well. She wanted to come
swfUllY." Did she now2 That was too bad
Be sure and bring her next time" 81 will;
and you be sure and bring baby" ST will
forgot to tell you that he's cut another
TOOTH" "You don't say SO! How many has
he now" Five. 1t makes him awfully
cross" II dare say it does this hot weather"
"WeIl, good-by Don't forget to come down."
mo. won't. Don't you forget to come up.
Goodby." And they separate,
Didn'tDrop.
"What have you got there?1 said old Pau
gleGp to his daughter ''some pressed flow
ers?'
"Y.ess, sir" replied she, turning red
Don't seem to have made a good Job of it;
what we're they pressed sg ainst?
"Wby-er-against my belt" murmured
| the girl, who had been TO picnic with Char
ley. But the old man mover tumbIed.
Adding to Bis Woe.
Divinity student desperately in l0ve) =
Well, Miss Ealalie if you can not return
my love we may at least part friends"
Eulalia-"Ob, certainly"
Aud can not you give me one kiss to
| keep in sweet remembrance through nay
| lonely lfe2'
Il do not think il would be right, now,
| but will after yen are ordained"
WAY, what differences would that make?
"You can perform the ceremony when l
marry some one else, and you know IL is Gus.
| tomGry to kiss the bride"
He concluded he would have business in q
| foreign land about that time.
Answered by Card.
We were plsyin' euchre last evenin';
There were four of us in the game:
Molie was Ned's fair partner:
Mine Yas-guess won't tell her name.
You see, I'd kept her company
For quite a good long time past,
An that night I'D made mind