Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1885-01-28
S9CAENHHG.

| Mamma to small boy sick in bed-Johnny
| did you sleep well last nghts Johnnv-No
| mamma, l slept sick-Cincinnati Merchant
| Traveller.
A Boston doctor who has Just retired with
| a big fortune says he drew remedies fol
| corns and consumption from the same keg,
| and most of his patients got well. This is
| believed to be the first physician who even
| confessed.-Chieago Herald.
Prayer books are now made with bouquet
| holders on the Gutside, and it looks as if in
| short time Bible will not be complete an-
| til it has plate glass mirror with little COM
partments for hairpins, face powder and CO.
! logne on the back.-Boston Post
| A Chicago man who called upon a musical
friend the other evening at supper time was
warmly welcomed, as they had party, and
they were just going to have sonata. He
said he thought he smelled it as he came
| over.-Burlington Hawkeye
::AA, Bilson, havn:t seen you for some
years hefore!:' 'ENo, it's lang time ssBut
see you are still true to the grand old party. %
Eyes, am, but how on earth could you tell
it?' ''Oh, [ see you have on your last win
ter's overcoat Chicago News.
Ancient maiden lady (fortyseven years old
and ugly, to young lady eighteen years old
and pretty: II hear you are going TO be
married soon2' 'fYes, next week. ttAh,
| dear me, sooner or later there will be hardly
any of us girls leftl''-Texas Siftings,
$50 you didn't succeed very we'll with your
school in Illinois.' ''No, had to give it up
at the end of the first month" ''Did you
use the blackboard muchs' ''No, it was too
large. But I used all the other furniture
about the room that wasn't nailed down -
New York Graphic, = =.
'tSay,'' said the boarder to the waiter
eyes, sir, twas the polite answer 'Has
the cook the recipe for making this puddingl'
Eyes, cir, think she has. !" s'Well 60 out
and tell her to throw it away" Then silence
healed the blows of fsound.-Merchant Tray
eler.
Glow much for candys" said little boy
''Sicx sticks for five cents, eha Now, lem'me
cents four for three cents, three for two cents,
two for one cent, and one for nothing I'll
take one stick, mister" He got it, but the
dealer is still in state of bewildernent,
and can't how that can he-AIontreal
(Canada) Witness. ''
At the Unitarian club Mr.. shippen told
story recently related to him by a Princeton
gelical gathering A German guest who
was called upon to address the body, did not
sufficiently distinguish between the accepted
uses of the words ''bare" and tba1ten H.and
said: '1t gives me great PLEASURE to address
these venerable and barren heads. Chris
tian Register.
First oficer-f'That was a very mysterious
case of suicide last night, wasn't it, H. was
young, well dressed and apparently we1l-to-
do. Not bit ike the ordinary suicide"
Second offcer-tI don't see that there was
anything very mysterious about it. It struck
me that it was very ordinary ca.e'; s.But
| there was nothing found on him to indicate
the cause for the deed" .'Oh, yes, there
was. " S:.What was ite'' s'His marriage eerti-
tieate. New Orleans Tin, ,es= =bamocrat,
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lay Gould's wonderful new Yacht will If