The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1885-03-13

"SoSN MoAAAn6Co Ui1cA over uO-
siced in connection with any Of my 9TH
er work. There are times when 1 have
difficulty in keeping my countenance
straight, and Of course you wouldn't
like to be laughed at by the minister
just as he was about to join you solemn-
" in wedlock with the lady you loved.
The most trying time I ever had was
when 1 was young in the ministry, and
when ! had not such control over
my keen sense of the ludicrous as 1
have since acquired. / was located at
Houlton, Me. One day a couple drove
over from Woodstock, N. B., and when
they arrived in the village began mquir-
ing for minister. Some o fthe mischief
loving boys got hold of them, and took
them down to the market, where they
were placed on exhibition and Piled
with all sorts of ridiculous questions, to
the great amusement Of the crowd and
without embarrassment to themselves,
for they were too green to appreciate
the joke. Finally, after everybody had
had his fill of fun, the bride and groom
were escorted to my house by a few of
the most %mischevious of the crowd. It
was all I could do to keep from roaring
whenthey entered, aud T felt that I must
maintain my dignity, not only for the
sake OF the bride and groom, but be-
cause some of the young men present
We're members of my congregation, and
if ! yielded to my feelings then, I might
have difficulty in restraining myself
when l faced them from the pulpit.
The woman was the ~tallest, most
awkward and most fantastic female
/ yer saw She was six feet and two
inches high, and dressedin all the bright
colored toggery she could get on.
without regard to harmony or style Of
make. But one article struck me so
forcibly, and was thrust on my atten-
ton SO prominently, thas forgot all
the other details. She had q hand which
came near answering the description,
sas large as a goldfish and these were
enclosed in a pair of thick yarn mittens,
which made every finger look as big as
a potato. These gloves were a marvel.
They we're striped, red and white, the
stripes running lengthwise the finger,
while on the back of each hand she had
worked, in coarse yarn, what she
thought was some sort of a flower, into
which she had wrought every improba-
BILE color that y grotesque imagination
could picture. The man WINS a diminu-
tive half breed, Indian and French.
and he had no vest nor collar on, and
his pants were held up by a lumber
mans leather belt, fastened with an
old, rusty iron buckle. l managed to
get through the ceremony, however,
and relieved my feelings after they had
gone.
IT remember a bashful fellow who
came to my house with his girl to get
married. He was so bashful that I pit
led him. He was absolutely over
whelmed-paraiyzed, l ought to say.
He came into the parlor with his hat
on. and did not1fsmove IL once. despite
all the hints that his bride and Igave
him. I said all the assuring things 1
could and tried to engage him and his
lady in conversation, but he was 80
abashed that he could neither answer
nor move. I limited that he stand be-
side his lady but he was so frightened
that lie did not understand. Finally,
in despair, I said quietly and privately
to the bride: IF you will take your
place beside the groom I will marry
YOU and when she approached him it
seemed absolutely to startle him with a
new fright.
zone young man, who came on
the same errand was struck with
curiosity the moment lie entered the
house. He absolutely ignored his
bride, while he wandered about the par
Tor, scrutinizing in a wondering way
every picture, every book. orna-
ment and piece of furniture in the room.
The bride sat and blushed, while 1 tried
to call his attention to the business of
the moment, but he kept on, and it was
more than fifteen minutes before I
could get the two corralled near enough
together to marry them:
II married q queer couple once a
short time before I came to Boston.
The man had just entered his profession
which we will call that of a physician
and had determined upon his place OF
settlement. The young lady, q bright,
intelligent, we'll educated girl, who
knew the ways of society, had made
up her mind that she would marry q
doctor, and finally she had brought
matters round in n quiet womanly way
to the point Of his asking for her hand
and heart, and of course she yielded.
The acquaintance had beer astonishing
~ brief. They were hardly acquainted
when l was summoned to marry them.
be was very skillful and devoted to his
profession, which he had mastered we'll
Tor q young man in theory and
practice. But he knew less of the
ways Of the world and the customs OF
social and domestic life than any other
man l ever met. He was on the point
OF starting for his new home the very
next day after the marriage, and with
the utmost regarding the
prophecies of the occasion, had packed
mp all his apparel ready for the journey.
He was stopping ct the house of a
friend, who, ut the last moment, late in
the afternoon, discovered that the
bridegroom did not have o change OF
linen to dress with. Hurried consul
tatlons were had, and his hostess, with
woman's readiness for emergencies,
took the measure of his collar and
waist, went down just as the store weE1
about toclose and purchased the desired(
articles, which the bridegroom accepted
with tbs utmost equanimity and,as il
the articles were not OF much conse-
a.uence anyway. They went away, and
10 q few days the bride wrote a letter
% one OF her friends, in which she re-
marked with charming naivette. Eve
nad . good, pleasant journey, and ]