davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

COMPLETED The iron bridge which
spans The gap in our mountains through
which Owens Creek flows built to replace
the wooden structure placed there by The
w. Md. railroad company when it first laid
the track over the mountains, was complct-
ed last week.
Unfortunately for our readers, we are not
well enough vcrscd in the technical language
ii b.i.gce and r.lge uuldingto cs8"% : "
scripton of it and none having be- n i,..Qcd
sent or suggested to W., we must he content
to speak OF it as q trcstle work Of seven pairs
of lcgs or trcstlcs; these Ices are of about
haIf-inch boiler iron, four sided and hollow ;
the bridge proper, or stringcrs are Of the
sane metal all 1rmly braccd and holted to
gcthcr, The fourth pair Of trcstl,s counting
from thr eastern end stand aStIidc the bed
of the stream and arc tlarcd more then the
others, giving tie structure an ode appca,
ancc The trcstlCs do not stand in line
with each other a. The track over the bridge
is a decided curve the main cross frames OF
the bridge are of sufficient length for two
tracks and are made ready to receive anotl-
or pair of "strn4crs," whenever such may
become necessary; the track occupies the
southern side Of The bridge and has been
placed there with great care and precision,
It il certainly grand and staunch piece OF
worI. and will relieve the minds Of many who
had come to dread = pa;sa"" ov"r IL" Old
!. =
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

Sourkrout now sccntcth the larlrr,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

The synod of the Potomac, Reformed
Church in the S, will convene in Cham
brrsburr, Pa, October Goth, 1855, at +! p M
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

A GREAT NINE.--Mr Ephraim llauvcr of
llauver'S district reports to Us pumpkin
vine crown hy him this season, which at
tanned llr great length of 1888 feet, not count
ing crooks and kinks in ;Ec vines on It grew
) pie pumpkins which weighed LOG pounds.
'Rah for lIauvcrs.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

Rev 4 b Stonrr will preach in Trinity he.
formed Church next Sunday evening on
"Thc Rewards of sunday School Workers.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

Chicken thieves are around
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

a. windstorm prevailed during Tuesday
81
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

SALE or A -Rcmrmbcr TINT ON
Saturday, 18th, Mr. Jerc. Flohr will sell his
farm lying cast of this town. See Adv.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15
Local Items.

Hard cider stone fence.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

PUBIC SAIr.--I Clay Cram"r will sell
Il valuable lot Of personal property at his
home in Crcagcre,own on Monday next,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15

~" COOK oyES.-"l'hc Times cook
stove took the Gold Medal at the New Or
leans Exposition. This stove is sold by
oct ST N. j. ALBAJGlI.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1885-10-15
tNV'TTN' WIV II. q
To whom il may concern


Tie un'rrrigr Cd ha, been sick ABOUT one
wear Y itEl l,n@ disease, stomach, c"n.llp'-
lion and nervous affection. Had four differ
rnl doctors, hn no help. One stated thf''
he could not put in new stomach Enn!hci
said, if he cDNld GET .nc constitution huiIt up
the undersigned would set a! Ei4hI but i'
failed. Dr. Ploulz then al Cann"l'sTiIIr Wa>
sen, for and in three days got help ana am
getting better daily.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02

SAN FRANCISCO, March 2i.-The City OF
Sydney arrived this afternoon from Aus
tralia bringing the particulars OF the Han
lon Clifford boat race which took place at
Sidney, February eth, and was won by
Hanlon The match was foe e1.000. and
there was an immense gathering of people
present Clifforti rowed "a to the minute,
and Hanlon IS. Clifford's work at the
start attracted all .he attention and il
seemed to promise something prodigious,
but 10 the surprise of all dwindled away
as Hanlon gradually drew mp for half a
mile. Clifford made splendid race, but
Hanlon contenting himself to keep near
enough to watch him without trouble.
Hanlon then dropped his stroke to y, and
the old smile indicative of victory settled
on his face. After gauging the remaining
distance Hanlon quickly drew away to
three lengths ahead and then to four, then
to five. Clifford, who was pulling man
fully, spurted. but Hanlon met him and put
another length between them. As they
passed the Sidney rowing club Hanlon
was nine lengths ahead. He then Stacked
off and finished as winner by seven lengths.
Hanlon was loudly cheered
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
Ncw II. u. DIRECTORY.

BosToN, March 25.-The annual meeting
of the Union Pacific stockholders was
held to-day. The meeting then appointed
an inspector and the election for l. directors
for the ensuing year opened, but one
ticket entering the field: Chas. Francis
Adams, Jr., Frederick l.. Ames, Elisha
Atkins. Ezra II. Baker, F. Gordon Dexter,
and Mahlon ID. spalding, of Boston Henry
II. Cook, Sidney Dillon, David Dows and
Andrew II. Green, of New York; ). X. Cal
laway, OF Omaha, Nebraska ; Greenyille NJ.
Dodge, of Council Bluffs; Hugh Riddle, of
Chicago James A. Rumrill. of Springfield
Mass. John Sharpe, of Salt Lake City.
Messrs. Spaulding, Cook and Galloway,
will be the new members of the board,
taking the places, respectively of Russell
Sage, Jay Gould and 5. III. III. Clark.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
PLANT or THE CROCODILE.

A crocodile sat 10y the River Nile
A. grumpy a. grumpy could be;
While hc picked his teeth with "A common file
lie poured out his trouble to me.
Oh why oh why can't the tourists bold
Let poor reptile be;
But keep pegging away with long-range guns
At au innocent chap like me;
That never harmed "A living man,
Who could quickly get away,
Aud j. "A moral example, when forced TO be.
Throughout the livelOng day
Who Esl,s nothing but peace and rest,
And a dark brown haby or two
] find them easier To digest,
Than a missionaI don't you
For the kind they send " to Egypt here
Are skinny and dry and thin
More bones than meat, like desert steer,
And tough and dry j. their skin.
They send them round 10y the China seas,
And season them there for while
- that the sun bakes ont of EN- all the grease
BEFORE they get to the Nile.
Anc this j. WHY / weep bitter tears,
And weep them morning and night;
For frankly confess have my fears
That we are not being treated quite right
by the foreign missions in distant lands,
Who supply this prog tO us,
They might send them fresh, AT first hands,
Thea wouldn't raise such a fuss,
such was the plant of the crocodile,
just a. he made it unto me.
While he sat by the banks 81 the River Nile.
And prudcUtly stayed ia "A tree.
--PitsJurg Times
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
Methodist Conference.

CHESTER, Pa, March 24.-The Pbila-
delphia Methodist conference unanimously
passed the following resolution:
That we, the preachers of this confer
ence, for ourselves and our people, send
General Grant assurances of our affection
and promise our feryent prayers, beseech-
ing Almighty God to tighten his sufferings
and, il it be possible, to lengthen his days
to strengthen him with might and sur
round him with shinings of the divine
face, so that if, as we fain would hope, he
shall be spared yet to live yet many days
to his family and to his country, the peace
of God, which passeth all understanding,
may rest ppon him always; or if it be APP
pointed to him to fight now his last fight,
his enemy may be put under his feet.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
Enough 10 Get 4 Divorce.

And don't YOU skate, little girl: :" he
asked as he sat down beside her.
"Oh, no, sir
But you can learn"
Il guess | could, but don't want to-
And you do come here just to watch
the skaters"
"Oh, no-I come to watch Mrs. K
"Who is shey7
"Shes papa's second wife. He don't
want her 10 come, but she will do it."
'And why do you watch her 2"
well, papa wanted her to promise that
she wouldn't lean on anybody when she
was skating With 'em, and that she
wouldn't flirt when she was resting, but
she wouldn't promise, and so i came to
watch her These short marks are when
she leans, and these long ones when she
flirtsn
And you show them all to your father"
"Yes. and he dates them and puts them
away, and by and by he'll have enough to
get a divorce and marry somebody who
can't skate
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
Union Pacific Operations.

BOSTON, March PA summary of the
operations of the Union Pacific Railway
for the year 1ss4 has been made public,
and is as follows: For the last six months
the earnings, excluding the st. Joseph *
Western Railroad, were Slabs, 600; ex-
penses, 81, s01 900; taxes, S549, 900. The
surplus earnings OF the entire system for
the last six months of 1SS4, We're S7,3s1, =
0G0. Other reports from miscellaneous
sources make a total income of -, ,s92, 900,
against total income for the first six
months of the year of -, $4,000. The ex-
penditures for the last six months were
S3,195, 900. OF this amount 81, ,614 900 was
paid for interest on bonds. The total sur
plus for the last six months of the year
was Si,096,000. From this is deducted
S73O,O00 for the United States. During
the past year there has been expense and
loss in receipts, which are not likely TO
occur again. There is an increase in the
taxes OF S245,753, owing to the new law in
Nebraska, toll due from the ST. Joseph x
Western road to the st. Joseph Bridge Co,
which have not been paid. If these tolls,
amounting to S10l $50, are properly re-
ceipt of the system, they will soon be paid.
The accumulated deficiency in open ac-
counts and dispute of credits since the con-
solidation in lsS0, has been charged of
against the surplus income of 1Ss4, which
has sufficed to meet them all after paying
a dividend of II per cent and yet leave "A
balance of 81 ,0;;3, ,4ii, equal to I1-10 per
cent. ON the company's capital stock. The
total outstanding funded debt of the com
pany. which does not include the funded
debts OF auxiliary independent organiza-
tions in which the company is interested,
amounted ON December Sd, lisa, to So, !,
l73,2s5. rs compared with ssi ,506, ,352 on
December 81 of the previous year, showing
"A decrease for the year of S33,047. The
net reduction OF the entire debt, funded
and floating. during the year, was S51s,-
900. The land sales of the company dur
ing the year. after deducting sales can
celled, were 1921 ,0il acres for the Unien
Pacific proper, which realized S6,5ls, ,1s3
for the Kansas Pacific 452, ,566 acres, the
amount realized 81 ,917, ,s65. The $4,000
in dispute has been decided against the
company, which leaves the road In debt to
the government as above stated
The report of the commissioner of roads
on the Union Pacific Railroad, as revealed
by the companys books, shows that there
was due the United States for the year
1-si, under the Thurman act, Sll3,220,
against which there is credited for govern
ment transportation, etc, Sl13,jl1, leaving
$40 due the government for the year Pres
ident Adams says the company will pay
promptly the $1,000 adjudged due the
government by the court OF claims.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
rlIE CATS.

CHARLIE =. DANA.
Hear the warbIiug Of the cats
Merry cats,
O. love To hear the music Of their midnight
nightly spats
And they waltz around and frisk all,
In the 10y air 81 night,
IN way 80 weird and brisk all,
While their shapely tails they whisk all
With Cat!ine delight
Keeping time with their tails,
Like a 10; Of Runie fails.
To th" coucat-catenation lsung Ia -undry sharps
and fats
OF a canticle on rats,
Rats, rats, rats,
To the wild, camivorous canticle ON rats
Hear tue turbulent Tom cats
Daddy eats
How the catapultic bootack interrupts their
hendish chats
In the darkness of the night,
How their ghoUlish outcries smite
Portland Flats
From their catncoustic throats
An intense
Cataphonic ditty floats
~ the turtlc-Cat tina, listens while she gioats
On the fence!
An. Che tabby-cgt that listens while she gloats
To the surging cataclysm Of their wild catsrr-
hal notes
Hear the hoarse grandfather cats
Aged cats
How they make us long to grasp a score Of good
krck-hats'
They have caught bad catarrh
Caterwauiing at the moon,
See itr Caught bad eat RI
You may hear them from afar
Roll IL like a British
Out Of tune.
Ia a clamerous appealing To the aged tabby-cat,
In a futile mad appealing TO the deaf old tabby-
cat.
shrekng higher, higher, higher
Like a demon Ia fire
White the little kitten cats
Infant cats
Sing an cmulOus sweet ditty of their love for
juicy rats!
That's
hut a rIldimputwl -pasm of the capsrS OF the cats
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
Some "Good Pay- Logic.
Mining and scientific Press. /

Mining and Scientific Press
If You want a mine, develop your pros
pect
Never build mill till you've got an ore
J producing mine.
Stick to one mine and develop it system
\ atically.
| Subscribe at once for your local paper.
I In addition To this take metropolitan
Z journal that is devoted to mines and min
\ ing, as such paper keeps you posted on
mining laws, new and successful methods,
and through its columns the attention OF
capital is attracted toward your camp and
your mine.
If stranger visits your camp looking
for investment don't frighten capital away
by asking a dozen prices for a good look
ing prospect hole. Always remember a
prospect is not a mine.
Mines are not found-they are made by
thoroughly developing prospect
There are too many men with more sand
than sense, superintendents and working
mines nowadays. There are exceptions, of
course Some seek in Colorado that which
only exists in California, and vice ysrsa.
Men thoroughly conversant with the
formations and ores of a district are the
best TO superinteDd mine.
Always average your selections of ledge
ard vein matter for assays. Don't pick
out the rich and leave the poor. Farther
information will reflect badly on yourself
and the entire district.
Do not misrepresent a mine II not only
hurts yourself, but the camp as well.
Encourage and assist legitimate mining.
DO not appoint bank clerk or storekeeper
as a superintendent of a mine or mill.
Mining superintendents do much TO help
or kill camp. A practical man in charge
of property should be encouraged,
Try to post yourself on the formotions
of your district. DO not work on the by
guess and by gosh" system.
Go down deep on vein before starting
a long tunnel to tap it.. Be sure that the
ore is of such grade and quantity as TO
justify you in taking chances on a long
tunnel through hard rock.
Take pick-handle TO all cranks who
come around with "whangdoodles,' "indi-
Gators and such spiritualistic rackets.
Sit down on all booms. If big strikes
are made and paying mines opened there
will be no trouble to dispose of them all
to men of wealth. Money will develop
the camp and its inhabitants-not the rab-
BILE who follow a boom will reap the
benefits.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02

ST. AUGUSTINE, Fla, March ?7.-The
celebration Of the landing of Ponce De
Leon in 1912, and the founding of the city
by Menendez in 1915, was q grand affair
The entire city was decorated with Spanish
colors. The old fort at San Marco was espe-
ciably noticeable. The ceremonies con-
sisted in the representation Of the landing
of Ponce De Leon. State Senator Genovar
perssnated the Spanish discoverer. He
was escorted by 46 attendants in Spanish
costumes, with battle axes and glittering
helmets to the inner quadrangle of the
fort, where high mass was celebrated After
the services, addresses were made by Gen.
Gibson, Commandant, and G. X Fairbanks,
the historian of Florida. After the speeches
the troops Of the garrison, state militia. and
civic societies invited The guests and citi-
zens to parade the principal streets The
procession was Witnessed by 10000 per-
sons. There will be fancy dress carnival
tonight, also grand ball, yacht and boat
races, and in the evening display of fire.
works in the harbor.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
A Hood For His Wife.

"Now, Lovey,' said old Bilkins' wife the
other morning as he started to 90 down
town to attend TO business What is
ooh going to give wiiey for birthday
gift ," He only gets that kind of taffy
once year.
"Oh. you shall have a nice hood, lif you
like
'Oh, hoods are so cheap, petty"
"Well, the kind of hood / want to give
you costs thousands of dollars"
What kind OF hood is it. dovey? 2"
why. the neighborhood," said Bilkins,
and ne flew, while she slammed the door
and said something about the old wretch
cooking his own dinner, for she wouldn't
do u to save his life.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02

80 You say you cannot help me get the
post Office
Il am sorry, but cannot"
Didn't you tell me that if voted for
You for Congress, you would be under
everlasting obligations to me-"
Yes,
Well
But you see ifI should get you the
post Office, would be paying off the obli-
CATION
Certainly
And / promised that the obligation
should be everlasting. i must keep my
promise. sir
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
An Outrage.

New York Cashie=-It's an actual fact
Il fcould hardly believe my own ears
The Directors have decided to examine the
bank books aad fLads.
Mrs. y. Y. Cashier-The idea! i never
heard of fsuch an insult
Insult, It Is worse. IL is insolence-
perfect outrage.
II wouldn't stand il. Why don't you
resign at once :
"R--sign?"
Yes shake the dust from your feet
Tell them you won't associate with such
vulgar, lowbred persons. Why don't you
resign this very day"
We'll, you see, my dear, I've got to bor-
row 100000 for ten days to ride over the
examination, and if | should resign how
could paw back the money 2"
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
4 COY COQUETTE.

Zeekei Moses. Leah me, sab.
Don't be- crOwdin' quite 80 clus:
Luff dat lamp alone, too. please ssh,
Else dey's gwine to be a fuss.
Took dat ham from of my shoulder
Praps yd tink I'm no-cOunt trash;
Ebcry night ye get more holder
Tink yer smart to he 30 brash.
What dye prg.se dat Calline foahe
II dat gal so mighty dear:
Leah dis kitchumi dar's de doah,
Court dat Calline-wha; do kear?
Course kear-I-don't be leabin'-
But yer nuff To r'ile a saint
Amt yer shamed yo'self for bleabin.
Calline's han'some when she haints
Please now. don't git wuss'n ebber-
Keep daI now-Oh, Well,
flyer 'tarmined-kiss me nebber
stop dis instep or I'll yell!
Well. ifyou amt 'tarned bashfIi!
Pshaw! who'd hab man with skeers
Oar no-, don't git oher rashful.
70 de fack III box your ears.
Bless me! what de use Of 'sisiin',
Co-e yer boun' 20 hab yer way;
Not afore one weck-now listen
say lest one week from dis day
Marry now an what's de harm In IL.
Zeekel Moses, why 70 shame,
How blush-well, flyer tarrnined-
dat oeats Caliine jest de samel-
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02

Judge Wakefield, of Waco, has son of
whom the Judge is very proud He thinks
the boy has a judicial mind, and will grow
up to be great iurist. The boy is. how
ever, very lazy.
few days ago the Judge said:
MY dear boy, why don't you study
more industriousIy want you to be-
come a famous jurist. You have not
touched your books to-day"
II am not going to study any to-day"
responded the indolent boy. Il dontssee
that il makes any difference, pa, whether
become famous jurist few days
sooner or few days later.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
Senator Edmunds' Joke.

From the Washington Hatchst1
have just heard good story at the ex-
pense of Jim Christie, Deputy Sergeant
alarms of the Senate, whose fancy turn
out is well known TO the Avenue
habitues.
"Jim" was coming down the Avenue on
Tuesday afternoon flying light" just as a
party of Senators was crossing the Avenue
to look at Hancock's curiosity shop"
The. attention of the party was called to
Jim, who was muffled up in n heavy seal
coat, with an immense three-cornered
seal cap.
Well said Senator Edmunds. IF
didn't know that was Jim / should say
that the bull walrus had escaped from the
Dime Museum and was out on a lark
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
THE YOUNG WIDOW.

She II modest, but not bashful-
Free and easy. but not bold;
Like an apple, ripe and mellow
Not too young and not too old
Half inviting. half repulsive,
Now advancing, and now shy
There l. mischief In her dimple,
There 3 danger in her eye.
She has studied human nature;
She j. schooled, in all her arts;
She has taken her diploma
As the mistress Of all hearts.
She can tell the very moment
When To Sign and when to smile;
Oh a maid = sometimes charming,
But widow all the while.
Are you sad ]? How very serious
VIII her handsome face become,
Are YOU angry She il wretched,
Lonely, friendless. fearful. dumb
Are you mirtldulT How her laughter
silver-sounding. will ring out
She can lure, and catch, and play you,
As the angler does the trout.
Ye old bachelors Of forty.
Who have grown 80 bold and wise
Young Americans Of twenty.
With the lOve-lookn In your eyes
You may practise all the lessons
Taught by Cupid since the Fall.
But know "A little widow
Who could win and fool you all.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
A Naturai Mistake.

PA said little boy to his father, on
their arrival in ST. Louis Il didn't know
people in this city had wings-
Wings Certainly not" replied the
father.
Then what are those things that stick
up so high ?"
Hush, my boy" said the father, in an
undertone; you mustn't speak so loud.
Those are ears
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02
so often.
IF my salary is raised
Then | can hold.
ffIn my sleep.
In 4 Mood Of Regeneration.

He placed his cane and hat on a chair
and took a seat. with the remark:
Your wife has been a member of my
congregation for the last tive years"
Yes, believe So
And have felt it my duty.to have q
short conversation with you in regard TO
your own soul. desire to speak with
you more particularly in regard to gamb-
ling in grain. DO you realize the enormity
of the offense."
II think do. Just read that"
1t was a telegram from Chicago read
ing Our loss in the late deal will be
about 4.000 each"
The preacher didn't stay for any farther
"wrassling,1 being convinced that his
"hearer" must realize the enormity, and
something to boot
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02

A pious father on the West-Side entered
q Clark street saloon the other evening
and to his infinite surprise and unspeakahle
modification discovered his only son seated
at cardtahle indulging in the wicked
game of poker. He bounced the youth
unceremoniously then looking at the
vacant chair at the table he noted that
his heir hsd left q very promising hand.
and so he sat right down and finished it,
and raked in the pot.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1885-04-02

DENVER. March 27.-The attention of
ex-senator Hill having been called TO
charges of the Senate committee on post
offices and postroads respecting the publ
cation of an unauthorized report of that
committee, says: The charges in every
important particular are absolutely false !;
that he did not order any printing done at
the government printing Office after his
term expired; he denies that he directed
the clerk of the postal committee to have
additional copies printed. He says the only
report he ever ordered printed was that
committees investigation in the summer
of $50