davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

TIE Democrats Of Belmont are wonder
ing how it all happened. 1t puts US in
mind ofan old story ted about a candi-
date for the Legislature down in Harrison
county, this State. When asked how it
was he got so few votes, he answered
thuswise: Well you see my friends didn't
turn out at the election, and those who did
turn out voted against me- That must
have been about the size Of it across the
river
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

The State elections in Ohio are hereafter
to be held in November and the people
will not so often have their business and
rest disturbed by elections. Though more
politics may come at a time, in not com
ing so often the people 81 appreciate such
advantages better when they come.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
New Way to Pay Old Debts.

It's q terrible thing to owe money" said
Smith. ITO be compelled to dodge around
the correr and that to avoid meeting 9
creditor on the street. 1t takes the man
hood out of one and he soon loses ell self,
respect. an glad to gay that no longer
owe a dollsr."
Then these old debts have bothered
you so long are all squared up, are theyY'
yes, thank heaven! The last n be,
came outlswed yesterday"
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

THE New York PrOhibitionists are do
Ig a good deal Of free advertising for Mr..
LA DAvESpORr, Republican candidate for
the Go~vernorship Of New York. They
are circulating the finely engraved bust
ress cards Of the distillery company Of
which Mr.. DAVENPORT is president.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
Not Up In Yestmsnts.

(Our new incumbent a disposed 10 be
High. ")-Younger countrymsn-"l zay,
Gearge, what wur that psrson had acros
his shoulders Surday2 Looked like some
O. his wite's things" Elder countryman-
"Ca-ant zsym zhewer. l beered un gay q
wur stole" Younger counIymsn-
"Stolel Ns, ma; / wouldn't Think that o
parson! More ike some these ere Lew
'aryest diek'rations!'
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
OHIO DURING rwEIvE YEARS.
How the Three Parties Voted From 1873
20 1891 Unelnsiya.

How the Three Parties Voted From 1873
to 1884 Inclusive.
Below is appended the vote cast by the
Republican, Democratic and Prohibition
parties since 1873. The G~reenback vote,
which at one time threatened. to prove
formidable, has entirely disappeared and Is,
therefore, omitted. The most interesting
part of the table is the Prohibition vote,
and the wide variance between the claims
# that party and the vote it actually cast
will strike the most casual observer. The
vote cast for President is omitted in the
following table:
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
At the Ball of the SEASON.

Young Farmer Gust from the country
and unused to city wsys)-"GoOd gracious,
John, just look at that lady! Did you ever
see anything like itY'
City Friend-"Which one? The one in
white satin? On, yes; she's very charm,
ing. And what an elegant costume
Nearly all the ladies seem 10 be in full
dress to night"
Young Farmer-rFull dress! Well,
should say sol Full to the brim and run,
ming over"
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

The committee appointed for securing
the purity Of the bOllot box in Cincinnati
kept their eyes open and did pretty good
work. they exposed l,4OO ~fraudulently
registered names, and they intend to make
it lively for the guilty parties.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

DEMOCRATIC prOhibiiOnists were plenty
in Belmont county on Tuesday, but the
Republican prohibiionists, where were
they? All, yes! where were they?
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

Win a reduced Republican majority in
Ohio and New York and Virginia in the
immediate prospect the Democratic rcOs,
ter can afford to crow.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

An attempt will &c made at the Paris
Exposition in 1889 10 establish q universal
language.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
NipItin the Bud.

Eleanor Kirk comes out in an eloquent
article defending babies and young chill,
dren from promiscuous kissing by oil sorts
Of people. She is right. This thing Of
every body kissing all the babies is oil
wrong. Still, low, you lake q girl baby
about between 1 and ) feet old; just ge;-
ting into long dresses, you know; pretty,
you know; hsir banged and irizzled and
shirred, and he facewashed real clean. and
sou be in the pGrlor with her, sitting on a
sofa about big enough for me and a half,
and her father standing in the door kind Of
casually looking in on you-Hw, you
wouldn't kiss her for o dollar. lLa easy
enough to check this promiscuous kissing
OF girl babies if you 60 at it in the right
way.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

TINS Inteligencer evidently lest money
on HoADLY. 1t was u~nprepared for Fox
ASER'S election. The cuts with which it
blossomed out yesterday 60 to prove this.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

ONO could not make up her mind to let
the &. o. p. go just yet, Two years more
Of II, however, will give her enough.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

TINS Cincinnati Enquirer claims the
Legislature on joint ballot. Mr.. McLEAS
was always good on that point. We hope
he's right.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

OHIo Democrats, though they failed to
come out and vote, did good work in re-
dacing the Republican msjOrity Of that
State.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

tbs REv. Nh. LEoSARD will have q
Jolly time telling bis flock what be Knows
about politics.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
Reached an Understanding rs to the
Punch.
Detroit FIRE. Press.

If should ask you to coucoct a milk
punch for me, could you doitg he blaudly
inquired ola Michigan venue saloonist.
Yes, sir" And if / should consume the
said punch and had no money TO pay for
it how would you treat me?' Give you
the bounce" Gently p Not by a long
shot!" do your best TO ipjure me, eh?'
OF course" Wouldn't care how much
sou degraded me in the estimation Of the
public?' No, sir" Very well, sir. !
always ike to have a previous understand.
ing in regard to such matters. You can
keep your milk punch and | will keep my
dignity"
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
FOR RENT.
Fob RBN

"AHTED-gy TIE Boston Decorative I'd
w Ladies TO do our ] ebt. plesssnt seIt .Aus
homes b nj promptly By mstl TO sh',srys
kaaly karped; can max. ON " 70 Do.
No ezn,asinG q iuIl inf rmsiion ahclss -
nuvs An works, : ElehAg g. Pace ba'..,,t.
20 eex SIG -
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

The result Of the Ohio election, though
not intended to make Democrats feel very
cheerful Just at this time, is nothing very
remarkable or d~iscOursging when every
thing is considered. Ohio was admitted
BY all to be q Republican State and has
been such ever since 1860, though vsria'
tons in the condition of State politics
have at times given the majority to the
Democrats. The msjorities in the follow
ing table viii give g good idea of the real
status Of the parties:
ISGO-Iineoln over
.ls6l-Lincoln over Mcclellan ......-.......-.~.-.5s,66
iS6S-Grant over SeywOur-.---......-.......~4l,6lI
lST2-6rans over Greeley "..................... 1881
lS75-Hayes over Tildsn.......-.......--... 1910
1850 Garfield ever HAneock
lSs4-Blaine over Cleveland-~~..--.-.----.Sl,S2
To overcome this Sl,sO2 Republican
majority, was 9 big gain for the Democrats
to hope for. II was necessary that every
Democrat be true to his party and cast his
vote and that the Republican majority be
made to disappear through disafectiOn in
Republican ranks and through the threads
of the Prohibitions. But none Of these
have resulted in much present benefit to
che Democratic party. Afull vote was not
east By the Democrats, and the PrOhibt
,%;opisis seem to have made about as great
;r,oads into the Democratic party as
into the Republican party. Also,
while there was disaffectiOn in Republican
ranks there was also some IN the Demo
cratic ranks. Some Democrats were dis
satisfied owing to the apparent slo"nes'
Of President C~LEyELASD's Administration
in making changes in Federal Offices O'n'
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
rHURspAY, OCroBkR l5, lsss.

A VERY short 5arrelled gun might
bring down that coon yet.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
nrm

ToR NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. ROOMS.
suitable for housekeeping. Ake, iurnished
rooms Tor rent corner Market and Tenth streets,
No. 100. Octh
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

DoARD AND ROOMS AT & h: II. POR-
ID ter's, Corner Fourteenth and ChaPtne Streets
auSh
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
Chickens and Literatnre.

We will allow thirty cents apiece for
grown hens to parties whose paper has
been stopped and are still owing US for it,
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15

VTANTEpEBY A WHOLESALE GROCERY
w house in this city, an experienced travelling
saiesman. Must be acquainted with the West VIZ
gfnia, Pennsylvania and Ohio trade, and give bond
Tor eollec Ions. No application will be enter
tanned fIom infxptritHced applicants. Address
with references, MERCHANT" RIGIsTRE ohe?'
nnlEr
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
olhsr Psopls BINDING FasIt.

Mshone's plan Of reforming his son BY
eowhidiug other peoples sons is not likely
to prove popular.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
The Power of Prayer wsn.Aimed.

A darby talking with a friend on the
subject Of answered prayers, was ssked if
the Almighty always answered his prayers
he replied that it depended entirely on
how he worded his petition. He said: IF
I ask the Lord to send me q turkey | won't
git il, but if l ask him to send me after a
turkey l always git one before daybreak."
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
Frowns when She Sees a Man.
SrraRRdh Nctes.

There is q young lady il 0rangeburg
Who runs q farm, and makes from thirty
to forty bales of cotton a year, besides
other crops. She Doesn't want to marry.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
Or Away on q Vacation.

With Buddensiek out Of Jail and Ferdi-
usnd Ward out Of the penitentisry, the
Goddess Of Justice in Ne# York appears
to have tar on her heels IS well as lead.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1885-10-15
The Age In Which We Live,

Sulkvan's annual income from smuggling
is greater than the combined salaries OF
the Governor Of Massachusetts, the Mayor
of Boston and the President of Harvard
University. Sullivan lisa great man.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
HE SkUCKED.
The Meanness of His Enemy In Not Giving
Him Half Chance.

The Meanncss of His Enemy In Not Giving
Him Half a Chance.
Riding out from Chattanooga towards
Bridgeport on horseback came across
a native who had seat on rock quite
q piece above the road. If he hadn' {
ratified a stone down just as | came
opposite he might have escaped unde-
tccted. He had a gun across his knees
and called to him:
Pretty good hunting around hcreo"
"May be-" he answered.
"What do you tind?"
"Nuthin' VT"
He seemed so cranky that was about
to ride on, when he rose up and de-
sccnded to the road. He didn't look a
bit good natured. and he held his shot
gun in 4 very careless manner as he
said:
Stranger, you mought havo come
frum Chattanooga
Yes"
"lou mought have had company part
o the way
Yes. a man on mule rode with
ilit lo AL siS tiit lOi ms, NAH u mile O3Ch.
Man with reddish a'r-long nose
whskcrs on his chin swears a good
deal?"
That's him."
And, hang him, he turned of. did
he?"
Yes took the right-hand road
"Jist like him-jist like the onorery
'possum he is! Stranger, that ere Teller
shot my father more n two years ago.
and he was the game was waitin' fur!
He's got three different roads to go an
come by, and jist as sure as m watchin'
one he IL 90 by t'other. He's fooled me
all summer long in this way. and I'm
gittin' that despert that if / miss him
to-morrer | shall have to 90 up to his
clearing and take 4 shot at him as he
sots in the door smokin' his pipe!
Stranger. what's Yer real, downright.
Christ an opinion of man as will put
another man ont of the way us he has
me. Detroit Free Press.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
MARKET REPORTS.



...
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,,r.n a. II a., ,r,;,ish H.. mar
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
A GREAT JOKER

is"w ~. tdiior ~ 40 Alliances Nswspsp~s
Iaissd &" Acquire Hrnaw. -. q ttamss.
Gus WRITER,
Hack knob"r, editor ~ the n,sllg
ker Sio'h, a humorous paper. tehe,
Tor prominent place among the jeslers
Of America II marked para graph.
having failed Ia pr,lurs a sensation
aud his long ARTICLES having been d..
clarri Ia h. ns dismal ~ the sctcak ~ a
woo'icn hinge. he ducidci upon making
SOME new attempt,
Il notice be- musrl unv evening.
"that the best humuri.t- in the past
were prnct cal jukers John i'h.nis
aud Aricmus " ard made thor greatest
hits la that way Now. II | got up a
Joke on some frller who travels aruun,i
some drummer who would ~ aruunt
and tell u would sson have aue'lon
al reputation
Hack Wa. soun afforded a. oppofia
nifty Of enforcing this determination
the night At the village hotel. he ~.
tirci nervous fellow Who Travelled fpr
shoe huu.c.
There's INV man. musrd Hack
I'm have him standing on his hrad 10
night How du tuu dos addressing
the drummer
this you vc got here Just now. while
standing out there. - dog camr mp and
Il was all ! could do Ia keep him ~
me
"Mud have been mad dog" ~.
piled Hack. "t.ood many ~ them In
the ncighhorhood.
well. that lets me ont I shalt leave
here IN the morning
Hack inqu rvd the number ~ the
drummer ronm. aud. late In the even.
ing Slipped in aud got under the Ded
The drummer came IN after wAlle
and sat down on the eiru ~ the bed
Hack growlrd like drg
II hope. said the drummer alnui
"that won't have another ~ io night
Id better throw this pistol away. fr l
might Kill sameboi, M. blamed "
don't keep u wonld ~, mind killing
n few such fellow. - live Ia this town
That fool editor nugh, Ia die
Hack did not growl
''iIe ought Ia ~ this night feel
mat thihH coming nn me. Relieve "
sleep under the lcd Then. II any one
should come IN Ia Nil me thcy coulin
find me"
The sharp coraer~ ~ Hacks bones
began TO thump the fluur
believe III shoot under there n
couple of times "
"for COTS sake. hold on Mister
exclaimed Hack, crawling out. 4 wa.n'I
dong anything " ~ made =
br'ak for the door
who IL that awful fellow - asked
Hack. when he reached the office
Why, don't YOU know himg
No"
Hes gning to b" YOUR rival hers In
business. Has bought the Asws saw
him laughing just hrfarc he sent up
SAID he was going Ia have some fun.
Hack groaned
SAID one II the bows was Irving la
play Joke on him Said that hr heard
that YOU were great practical lakef
Don't be- In hurry Hold me that
when he got u chance ha was going Ia
write YOU up. Well, good night
The weekly ker slpsh has suspended
Hack works ut n Steamboat iHnting
drkdHsdw irdreirr
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
GAMBLING IN NEW ORLEANS
The Prevalence Of the Vice In tho CHIEF
southern City.

The Prevalence of the Vice In tho CHEZ
southern City.
The publicity with which gambling
Is carried on is one Of the peculiar char.
actcristirs of the city. There are seven.
ty-tivc gambling houses within block
OF the intersection of st. Charles and
Canal Streets, and they thrive all over
the city. Many of these are large.
gilded dens conducted with the same
openneSs rs any legitimate business.
City officials and policemen can be seer
in these illegal resorts at almost any
hour of the day or night. The law,
against gambling are about as strict Il,
in New York. but they are dead letter.
Tn the contrary. one source of the city
revenue is from what is called the Gam.
blcrs' Fund. Each gambling house i,
required to pay so much month &c
the Mayor, according to an extra legal
arrangement maintained by common
consent. Failure to pay is followed
by an enforcement of the law clos
ing the house of the refractory pro-
prietor. AT least such is the theory on
which the fund is conducted. 1t is sup
posed to be applied to the maintenance
OF the almshousc. But there is no pub
lie accounting. and in the hands of a
ring of corrupt politicians it is easy tC
guess what that means. Proprietors OF
gambling houses generally have polit.
cal Influence, and doubtless many OF
them pay nothing for the privilege OF
running their dens of vice night and
day. Sundays included. Outsiders are
not allowed to come here and share in
the profits.
The spirit of gambling rules the city.
Iii the windows of cigar shops, news
stands and such places are displayed
for sale the tickets of the Louisiana
Lottery Company, for selling which
large commissions are paid. On DAYS
when drawing takes place the news.
papers have an extra sale. and much
excitement is shown among the poorer
people who can least afford to be
stripped of their small earnings This
lottery company has fine building
here. but the chef proprietors live in
luxury in New York and elsewhere.
They are said to contribute $4,000 a
yearto an asylum. which is all they pay
for the privilege Of enticing the people OF
the country to throw away hundreds OF
thousands of dollars annually. The
city runs its finances on the lottery sys-
tenn. Its bonds are distributed into
series, which are placed in a wheel, and
the lucky numbers draw prizes every
three months.-N. q. Cor. n. y Trlj.
7tHP.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03

Tin. rgorrur q! rIlat :'r;stans, Might !,c-
,crih, BY nnr q: tlI, Na!i,ress.

.crir,t l,y one e. the >alirrers.
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my '''''''
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shocks IL quick ~''''."-~'"n "'cl> Vn"d
u.::riy all IN. i >ir,--. VA, given nle by
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t.,"'r'i .n th ,' ,,a- ' we '' Al " ,lo
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Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
If Living.

In all policies of insurance these,
among host of other questions, occur:
age of your father, if liyingP" Age
of your mother, if living9' A man in
the country who filled up an application
made his fathers age, If living" one
hundred and twelve years. and his
mothers one hundred and two. The
agent was amazed Mt this, and fancied
he had secured an excellent customer;
but, feeling somewhat dubious, ha re-
marked that the applicant came from a
very long-livcd family.
20. You see, SIR" replied he, my
parents died many years ago. but. i,
living. would be aged a there Put
down"
Exactly understand" said the
agent.-BOston Gazette.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03

That there Is nothing new under the
sun must surely have been the reflect ga
OF those who Rad the strange story ~
robbery at Portsmouth. which "a de
scribed In this morning. papers some
thousands Of years ago King Ramc.e-
of Egypt n described hy licroiotus
got a builder 30 bulld him a secret
treasure house to witch the King alnna
could find an entrance hut the astute
builder left luo - stone aud helped him.
sell nj the treasury when be liked
About ten years agu, u appears. gen
tlcman named Milllgan r,'-iding near
Portsmouth, leinE II primitive dras
thought that "sUcr,d drawer would
be saicr than hank aud instructed a
workman to make him n receptacle ~
this nature lulo this drawer, when
constructed Nj Mllipan poured .ane
hundred suyeregns. and never after.
war,l inspected the starr until last year
In the early part II this year Ne MIN
gan put two hundred more snverslvns
into the drawer The builder ~ the
drawer seems. however. To- have h~en
struck with the same idea NJ the Eetp
tian architect IT ~" treasure house. aud
Went aud helped him-cli ~ he likc,i.
and 10 such m extent that he
has during the war purchased
some houses IN the ncighborhnod. Ia
fortunately the tales rnd difcrcnily
Tor. when the son ~ the Egyptian
builder eventual, securrd the princes.
and halt the Kingdom. the nngllsh
builder has merely found his way into
the hands II the police ~ James
GAZETTE.
Nsh.,,, I,n,un - A..r,L A a...l....
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
FROM A SENSE OF nuTY

Some people shrink from making public
the benefit they have received. while 9th
ers are free 10 tel it abroad tor the good
OF fellow aiorta!S. OF the latter KIND H.
Mr.. j. III. CoppuCk. "t M@unt Holly. y !
who writes, Il am one Of many who give
their cheerful arPrc, intinn Of the merits
OF the efficacy Of YOUR Valuable Brow u :
iron Bltlers, fiOm a SENSE at dutN. This
bitterS is doing much good IN our count,
for which can Vouch
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1885-04-03
A GOVERNMENT SHERIFF.

Mr.. Edward l.. Green, Sheriff, Auck-
land, New Zealand, writes: II received
an injury TO my shoulder in June, ISsl
and from that date until July, lsS3, could
not use my arm. applied to medical men
and used all sorts of liniment, without
any benefit. l have great pleasure in
stating had occasion 20 use St Jacobs
Oil for it, and had not used it more than
ten minutes before / felt the beneficial
effect, and / can work with my saw or
spade as well as ever l did, and recon-.
mend it to any one suffering pain"