Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1885-02-14
PAR.

Young ladies are oftener taken for wives
for their pas value than at their par value.
Oil City Blizzard
He-I don't see Charley and Clara together
lately. She-No, they've broken off. He
For gcoda She-Yes, for her good.-Yonkers
Statesman.
Rosaa in private life is said to be an agree
able man. For heavens sake, let him retire
to private life instanter, and stay there.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
Speaking of Rhea the Augusta Chronicle
and Constitutionalist says: ''Her face is a
Mobile one." They ought to work her up in
Alabama.-New Orleans Picayune.
A southern paper contains an article en-
titled Complaints About Cemetery" We
have not read it, but We do not believe the
fault is found by the inrnates.-New York
Graphic
''What would yon do if I should die:''
asked wife of her husband, as she laid her
fair, white arms around his neck ''Well
really, my love, hadn't thought Of it," he
answered, abstractedly, ''blt 1 presum me I'd
bury you."-Merchant Traveller.
''Your ags2" asked the Judge. 'EThirty-
Eve, your honor" replied the woman. Judge
-''But you were thirty-five the last time
you were here, three years ago." She
''And does your honor think Pm the woman
to say one thing one day and another thing
another?"-Boston Transcript.
There are men who would not hesitate to
walk mile in the mud for the purpose of
assassinatiug a man, and yet when they come
to be tried for the murder they must be car
ried. back and forth from court to prison in
cabs, owing to the delicaey of their constitu-
tions.-New Orleans Picayune.
There was a court martial held on a young
officer who had gone on q spree and had a
fight in barroom. The bar proprietor was
brought before the court and put in the wit
ness box. The prisoner was placed in full
view. Witness, doyou recognize the pris-
onerF' eyes, your honor, and most of the
court. San Francisco Chronicle.
After George Washington had cut down
his fathers cherry tree his mother thought
that the wood might be used for fuel and it
was accordingly burned and reduced to ash
es. Not long after Mrs. W. wished to make
some soap and took the cherry tree ashes, but
all her labor was in vain, for there was no
ly()e in the ashes.-Harpers Bazaar.
Why do tramps travela-A tramp stopped
at house in the suburbs of Houston and
said to the lady of the house, "Please give
poor man who is travelling and who is far
away from home triHe to help pay his ex
penses." eff you havn't got any money to
pay your expenses why do you travels" she
asked in observation-disclosures Siftings.
Burdette tells of an Arkansas literary So
c1ety that recently discussed the question,
Resolved, that a circus is superior to e dis
trict school as a civilizing agent" The cir
Gus packed the convention from the start.
Only one orator got up to speak for the dis
trict school. He was teacher, and the
president fined him twice and then made
him sit down.-Troy Times.
''Leisure is cheap at that chaps shop, Mr.
Spicer," said fellow passenger in a.Cam-
bridge horse ear, pointing to the sign, ga
superior lounge for $5," in a furniture deal
er's window. ssThat is rather tempting"
replied the other, ''but the fellow next door
undersells him.; and, he directed attention
to the bakers window, in which was the le-
gend, "a family loaf 10 cents. Boston
Commercial Bulletin