Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-04-28
BRIGHT BITS.

THE Afghan troops will probably be fed on
khanned gOods.-BoSt0n transcript.
THE destruction of Colon will not in any
way affect the name Of Ben: Perley Poore.-
Ae1o Orleans Picd37sHe.
DIR. PANcoAsT calls the face ''the play
ground of the soul" On this theory the Chi
cago mans cheek must be a regular circus
DECENTRALIZATION Globe.
EDWARD ATKINSON says that silver is not
as valuable as are eggs. This may be true,
but pocketful of the former does not cause
az lnuch anxiety as the same quantity of the
latter.-Bost0n Post.
SHE found her man: "She cried for succor
and went to her and" he cried as he pulled
out his empty pockets.
Yes, and by the looks of things, l should
thlnk she found one" was all the comfort he
got.-TAe Judge.
IN Patagonia they fine a man two goats for
Killing his wife. The law Is very strict on the
subject, too, and if the fine ISN'T promptly
pad he Is compelled to marry again. That
makes him hustle around for the goats.-Biag-
hdh1ton ReDabJjcan.
soRRowFUL OCCASION: ''What is the
meaning OF this great SORROW" asked a late
conner at popular entertainment; "what is
the audience weeping for?' ''PrOf. Bangs the
elorutIOnlst," whispered the usher. as he
wiped his eyes, has just finished reclting
humorous DOem."-NeJO York Graphic.
A WASHINGTON DISPATCH saws that "after-
dent Cleveland can get" Well. we should
think that was enough. If he was an editor,
a ride home IN street car would be about all
the recreation he could get, unless he went to
the skating rink at night and a fishing Sun
day morning. N0rrjSt01on Herald.
OK a certain occasion w. r. Travers was in
a stage going up Fifth avenue. and his son,
w. r., Jr., VINO was then very small boy,
was sitting on his knee, the stage being very
crowded. lady got in and there was no
seat for her. Mr.. Trayers, with his usual gal
lantry, said to his son: "B-Billy, g-get up
and give this l-lady your seat."-CIegeland
PlGjHdedLer.
WHERE to find a Job. Cant you tell me
sir, where 1 might find situatlon?" asked a
young man of Chicago citizen. 81 am a
stranger here"
what at?'' was the reply.
work"
Got any recommendations?''
Wen, no; but am industrious, am hon
est, go to church regularly, don't drink, 1
don't smoke, l don't chew"
'.Ah, | see. just apply around the corner
at the dime museum. "-Philddelph OdH.
A RUSSIAN WAR SONG.-
We're coming, AleXandroyitch, at least a
million more,
From Kanineshaeja's Bay and Obskalagouba's
shore.
From Karakouski's frozen wild, from lynn
skaia's plain,
We're marching. Alexander, with all our
might and main.
From Gatmonskino's forest, from Tscherbor-
beskOi's vale,
From w assiagOurbskas blooming fields, from
Olymskia's dale,
From Kakamajosa's villages, from Meidous-
charskis isle,
We're coming, Alexander, the weary rank
and file.
From pollysyllabic villages we're marching
gayly down,
Perchance to rot in Afghanland to gild anew
your crown;
We're ON to Berg-el- Murghab, and Penis
chidyeh we seek,
And we're headed by some Generals whose
names no tongue can speak.
From provinces and villages whose names
before the eye
Look like heap Of consonants shovelled into
''pi"
We-arolows and ofr-skies, effs and offs and
witches,
For Holy Church and Pious Gar will die in
Herats bitches. Boston GLo6s.