West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1885-11-13

20 listen constantly and laugh
IN the right place Never undc-
ceive customer W, en- he thinks
be had said q good thing. You can
ahori TO laugh heartily at an old Joke
Laughter i cheap mcdicinc. and i'm
some kInds OF business il draws like a
mustard plaster OF an advertisement
o him Who Is aching 10 tell all lie
knows everybody seems 90 talk too
much. IL YOU can beat man at an
argument cau him n crank. But don't
argue, When man arzuo, his brain
all rushes to one side of his head, and
the contrary side at that A mau was
never convinced OF anything by argu-
ment excepting Of his own cleverness
and tother fellow stupidity Men
change their politics md their beliefs
only aS they do their Shirts-when
they are alone. Tho man who talk,
much and easily may seem 20 be the
smartest but about the time he gets
tired the man who has been living back
IN the chair thinking puts in few
words that knock the other man out.
Education is good thing. but too
! often us more sugar coating TO hide
I ignorance. The best education is that
which teaches man how little ne
knows of the much there Is TO learn
and shows him the way TO think Tho
educated man is an amateur, while the
thinker Is professional.
Jimmy says |, when YOU want to
| Halter an intelligent man YOU must be
very careful II is q delicate operation.
and your fattcry must he administered
rs cautiously as your lather is Every
man likes a little soft soap IL YOU keen
/ it out of his ewes. You can ALWAYS
| Halter "A man by intimating that he j.,
| handsome. Every man will believe YOU.
for no man knows whether he is good
looking or not 4 large majority pf
men, however, have suspicion that
they are. 1t is different with woman.
She know, all about IT, and if not car
iul iu trying to compliment her YOU will
mako yourself ridiculous in her eyes. 1t
Is always safe TO admire her clothes.
Be politician only for an hour every
election day. The man who spends
most of his time trying TO get an Office
Is usually good for nothing else, and
not often for that The cheapest man
on earth is the ollce-sccker He feed,
himself w TIA hope on "a fork and thinks
he is getting fat BE ambitious. but re-
member that man has no wings He is
a crawling animal, and the baby that
walks be'ore IL terecps grows up SO bow
legged that even if bounding luck ever
comes his way it slips through and one
is charged against him ia the error
column.
land remember, Jimmy. says ].
that YOU will do well 10 have good
habits yourself Many good men have
bad habits, and the man outwardly
perfect is likely 20 have dry rot within.
The prettiest apple usually contains the
worm. and the most brilliant electric
light may shine in front of the tough
est saloon, but as a rule the man with
good habits is a safe one TO tie to- You
always have more confidence i'm horse
standing without hitchng If nc has
never run away or kicked out a dash
board, and the horse that has played
those pranks must always be watched
10 is the same with a man II you
have bad habits remember that
the greatest reiOrmeU the world
ever saw reformed only one person
himself Tbs IS a practical age, and
the man who wieds "A razor artistitally
Is more assured Of liycl hood than the
artist with his brush. Misery and hap
pines- are home made articles. You
have made your future il YOU are con-
liberal customers, are never appreciated
until just as they are ready 70 20 away.
Always take a sure thing, il il is a rood
thing and therefore make the most of
this life, because il is the only one any
man was ever sure Of Make the most
Of il by living as long and happily and
BEAUTIFULLY as possible. To do this
drink TO nObody'5 long life and pros
perity. and let nobody drink 20 yours;
be temperate, cheerful, generous and
Just Don't gossip about your fellow
workmen, or be Jealous Of them. Don {
lmagine them to be trying TO do YOU in
jury and whine about it. 10 others. Ii
you do YOU may lose some OF your best
friends. Female gOssips may be tOler-
ated-male gossips never.
Judge men generously, Jimmy
Look for their best, not their worst.
and learn To- average 'em. Every man
has his average Jails are full of men
whom society wouldn't average, but
took in az their minimum. The world
is full Of spoiled children who were not
averaged by their parents DO not
Judge by appearances. The customer
who wears the best clothes may stand
in most need Of a bath the bald -head
cd man with the baby-Iike head NAV
not be childishly innocent DO not de
post your savings with n bank whose
cashier dyes his mustache Young
roucs talk of vice old ones Of virtue
though love, tight boots. 4 stubby beard
and vulgar mind can not long be hid
And Jimmy, J says I'm conclusion
says J., be charitable. n o poor broke
comes in do not give him money TO buy
liquor with-give hinl shave and
throw in a bath They may save his
soul.
think Jimmy will make good
boy ] know he viii If he follows my
advice Your hair is Just in style now
sir; red is all The go A little of the
toDic2' - Chicqgo Her0id
OverWorked Meniais.
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