Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-05-12

to sleep. Give us plenty OF Jokes to
shake mans liver up and let the
tariff take care of itself. That's all.
BE in to see you again when I've
more time ; ia, tx
The next person who took the va
cant chair had a cOuntenance as solemn
as secondhand hearse. lie didn't
look as if lie had smiled more than
once in years, AMI the village editor
took him for an undertaken who
wanted to advertise patent embalm-
ing process and pay in trade.
Sir" said the solemn man, after
silence that came very painful to
the village editor, "I am grieved to
notice the tone of levity that has re-
Gently pervaded the columns of your
paper and | am compelled to. ask you
on that account to take my name off
your list. You seem to forget that
this is a world Of calamity and woe
and that spirit of levily in the press
is unseemly, and tends to draw at
temtion from the solemn realities OF
life and The near proximities of dealh.
Last week you declined to print my
article entitled Reflections Oh the
Grave alleging that you did not
have room for it, and then gave up
nearly a column of your paper to
frivolous jokes. do not intend TO
read anything light this year. That
is all | have TO say, good afternoon"
The door closed behind the solemn
man and then softly opened again t.
admit a dreamy-eyed man with a
poetic brow, and general expression
that seemed to indicate that he want
ed something he had never had aud
never expected to have.
Il merely came in to remark" he
began, as he took the vacant chair,
"that you are sadly neglecting the
literary department ofyour paper |
not only have noticed it myself, but
several of my friends have called at
tenliOn TO it. You should by all
means run continued story aud
have from two to three short stories
in each issue.9 EGood, stories is the
thing that is wanted 10 make VII
lage paper popular. Everybody you
ask will tell you that. A little news
aud some local matter aud the mar
riages and deaths should he printed,
of course; but you shouldn't let any
thing crowd out the stories. don't
take yOmr paper, but my brother III
4 law does, and borrow il Of him.
have intended for some time to men
liun the matter to you, but could
never think of twhen | was in town
before. lfyOu think that these sug'
geslions are of any value to YOU, you
may send me your paper erlinitonSly
for ayear. Allow me to bid you
good day, sir"
The dreamy-eyed man wont out
as softly as a sixty days note fall
due, and moment later another
style of person dropped into the va
cant chair, and spoke thus i'll tones
that were sharp and quick
II don't think that | shall TAXI
your paper another year. Iou art
not making it as good paper as yoI
should with your opportunities. Iol
J are not giving your readers enough
local matter. Local matter should b'
, the chief feature of the village paper
Everything else should be made t
give way to local matter. A stor!
, now and then, when you have pleni!
of room, and bit of poetry TO pleas
: the young folks who are in love, an,
a little news matter are well enough
, but if YOU want 10 make villag
, paper success, you've got to lie
| yourself out on local matter. Civ
, the news of your own commuait.
! and let the big dailies take care o
+ the rest of the world. And, by tn
. way, if you are little short Of loca
matters this week, you may say tha
| | have invented and patented th
| most common sense churn that .ha
5 ever been introduced to th
: public. | will be in in the course O
| a lew weeks, and will then pay m
subscription for last year, good day.
!, The village editor was just slidiu
!. under the table, crushed and meu
4 tally dcmoralized man, to hide hi
| head in despair or the waste baslle
G or in both, when a loud knock at til
= outer door brought him from hi
y dreams TO his waking senses.
: GLOW are YOU; old fellow?' erie
Z a cherry voice, and the Old Subscribe
= from up the creek took the villag
editor by the hand with heart
u grasp and shook a>pain into the ed
Y tors shoulder blade. And then til
1 Old Subscriber from Tine creek seate
h himself in the vacant chair and mel
a rily spoke thus:
t "Well, old boy, you're just givin
c us the very best paper we. ever.ha
7, A good story every week, some pott
10 TO please the women folks, c0lum
1t or two of fresh humor to make l
d laugh and keep our livcrs running c
d regular schedule time, just abol
lc enough Of politics, all the news tn
d is worth busy mans time 10 rea
ID every important local event Lwrittt
up in breezy, readable style, and a
,p vertisements of all the public sale
a and of the stores and shops that of
u, us bargains. Yes, sir; your paper
good enough for mc--worth what "
s. ask for it-aud l want topay you
T. years subscription for myself, al
Is here are four dollars more, for whi
at you may send your paper TO my s.
so out West, and my daughter doy
IL South, for they both like to get I
N. news from the old home and y
lis give more of it in one issue of yO
rs paper than / could write in tweu
b. letters. That's all I've got to say
w day. Come out and see me when |
nd gin TO make cider, and bring j
in along if you've got one, and il Y
at haven't, I've got one to lend 20
'ul good-by."
on And the Old Subscriber from
IA The creek went out with smile up
m his face that began just below his !
X ear and spread lcisury about over
i'll face aud then quietly mcandered bo
he TO the place of beginning.
III. The village editor was about
I'll. pinch himself to s'e that he was rea
ng wide awake, when the cry o" "copl
Of came to his cars, and then he did
,ut think it necessary to pinch hims,
on He only folded uD three crisD ty