Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1885-11-12

/ III 6sOub OuC NCsaA hChNOs "hSA IL S>AhA
of service expires. None but those VINO
are sincerely disposed to look this mat
ter square in the face need reply" The
military profession brings US to TWO adj
vertisements, which appear next each
other in the columns OF Western
paper.
Three young gentlemen. now serv-
ing in the United States Artillery. whose
terms of service will shortly expire, are
desirous of opening a correspondence
with . few young ladies with view TO
matrimony. Address in sincerity. with
carte de visite, II agreeable. NIB.
Three young ladies', interested IN
gallant soldiers, wish to open CORE
spondence with any who lack lady
friends ut home. We have albums in
which to store such photographs as we
may receive"
with carte de visite, if agreeable"
is ambiguous Is it but to say. in other
words: IF you are ugly don't send
your pictures"' But that little diff
Guilty siuks into insigniticance in the
presence of the awful idea-what would
the ladies have done if they themselves
had been four or the young gentlemen
two? How could they ever have de-
cided which of the sisterhood should re-
tire from the competit on?
In connection with matrimonial
questions. some papers announce the
most wonderful feats OF clairvoyance
and astrology, one lady. however. de-
claring that ''clairvoyance has nothing
to do with astroiogy. and those pro-
fessed astrologists who advertise as
clairvoyants are arrant impostOrs. !"
Here is 4 specimen:
Astonishing! Madame NJ. seventh
daughter, has foresight to tell how soon
and how often you marry and all You
wish to know, even your thoughts. or
no pay; twenty-five cents. Gentlemen
not admitted.
Now, gentlemen not admitted" is a
libel on the fair sex. 1t means to say
that it won't do to let men into the Sc
cretS of the future which matrimOny
will reveal. Madame NJ. has great
pull upon other astrologst in this fact
that she is a seventh daughter; but even
here she is cut out by Madame H., who
is 1.-The great seventh daughter" still
Madame S., who can not command
such a weird pedigree. is nothing
daunted by the claims of her rivals and
with great courage opens fire as fol-
lows:
(. Caution-Look out! Good news
for all! $1,000 reward for any one who
can equal Madame S!'
Let us hope that Madame S. is clearer
in her predictions than in her compo-
sition, as witness the following:
drunkenness cured. and numbers
free Ladies. take notice, you that
have been deceived by false lovers you
that have been unfortunate in life. call
on this great European clairvoyant and
astrologist Mrs b. would not object
to this combination of clairvoyance
and astrology' for it is these facts which
induce her to say that her equal is not
to be found, which is tested by hun
dreds who daily and eagerly visit hel
that this is no humbug."
The frankest lady of all halls from
the Bowery, Madame w., who honestly
warns people what they are to expect il
they 60 to her with valuable properly
on their persons.
MADAME W., clairyoyant and gifted
Spanish lady. unveils the mysteries OF
futurity, love. marriage, absent friends,
sickness. tells lucky numbers, property
lost or stolen.' She is, of course, the
greatest wonder in the world, and
probably the greatest nuisance, for hel
strong point is that she restores
drunken and unfaithful husbands. We
should have said that the poor wives
we've much better without them
BrOoL.yn Eagle.