The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1885-05-23
Mr. Nasby Goes to w shingtOn and
is Disgusted.
CoNFEDERIT x ROADS,
(Which is in the State NV KY,
Morob - rQQr

(
March 80, 1885.
1t is long and dreary way to Wash
ington when 700 hev to pay yoor fare,
and yoor friends wich put up the money
amt willin to advance enuff for sleepin
cars. 1t is espeshly a terrible thing to
make the trip at this pertikeler time.
The cars are crowdid with sad-faced
men, wich hev bin watin sentoory for
suthin to come wich amt come yit,
and is in dout ez to whether it ever will
come; men wich is lookin at 700 ez eff
they wuz mentally kalkalatin whether
yoo he'd IS cents about 700 wich they
Good borrow, and also ez tho the prob
lem Nv gittin bed to sleep in, when
they got ther wuz not yit solved.
Il didn't look that way. thot l
knew Washington. Icood, alluz in the
old times, ring in at the barrooms fur
my likker, and 1 knew the free lunch
routes ez they wuz. I wuz disappoint-
ed in all this, but Nv this more anon.
Bascom, Deekin Pogram and Issaker
Gavitt put up enuff money to git me to
Washington, and 1 insisted that they
give me enuff to git me home, but they
wuz firm.
EFF 700 don't git back at all, sed
Bascon, I'VE shell be happy, and eff we
give 700 a return tikkit 700 will sell it
and squander it in whiskey. 1t wood
almost brake my hart to see my good
money 60 into another 'sloon mans
till
So 1 made my way to Washington in
second-class car, settin up mites and
days, and, undismayed, l to-wunst
perceeded to an old haunt NV mine on
the avenue wher the lunch yoost to be
good. To my horror ther wuz nuthin
on the counter.
'Wher is the lunch?' 1 demanded Nv
the barkeeper.
'We amt settin out free lunch this
spring. he remarkt, with sternneSS
that l never saw exalted. 'We did it
till the sixth NV March, and quit becoz
bankruptcy wuz starin US in the face.
Their is a difference between a lunch
and full board, and ther to be sich a
rush Nv fellers like 700, with turned
paper kollars, wich wood take a full
grown PERSONS dose Nv likker and eat
a square meal and then tell US to hang
up the drink, that we wuz forst to sus-
pend the lunch and require the drink
to be paid fur invariably in advance.
And we hev a able-bodied pugilist to
turn em out at midnite, fur they COM
menst vigorously sleepin in our chares.
We keep 'sloon, not hospital or in
frmary.'
1 tried all my old places with the
same result, and becum discouraged.
However, went immejitly to the Post
master General, and got awjence. l
representa- to him that the bigger,
Jim Lubbock, had held the Post Offs
at the Corners sence Linkin's time,
and that in the interest Nv Civil Servis
Reform he shood be moved, and l put
in his place.
The Postmaster -Generyl wuz affable,
necessities Nv the case, and wuz goln to
do his best. He said to me that he
wuz conSiderin the cases in alfabetikle
order. He wuz eggsamin each case on
its merits. Lubbock! 3! L was the tenth
letter in the alphabet. There is 49,
900 Post Ofises in the Yoonitid States,
and L wuz about half away down. He
Good eggsamine about 20 day, and ef
ther wuz about 10000 before yoo come
to the LIS he shood say that he would
git to the LIS in about three years, to
determine whether Lubbock should be
dismissed at all Oh not. Then my
name, lJasby, commencin with N.
wuz also about halfway down the list,
and ez ther wuz, on average, SO ap-
plicantS fur each place, it would require
suthin more than than that time to de-
termine whether l shood be appointed
or not. That wuz the sitooashen.
Good MORN. Call agin when voc
come to Washington
But exclaimed, 'ef this is the way
yoo are goin to do it I shell be ded Nv
starvashen an cold long afore 700 git te
me. Remember, sir, our sitooaShen.
The free lunch counter is entirely done
away with-they demand cash for lik
ker. l can't stay here and | can't live
at home. wuz patriot, sir, doorir
the campane; 1 kin show the coal oil
on my coat from the torches l kerried
and to me, more than any other man
is doc the result in InjeanY.'
sYoor patriotism duz 700 credit re
marked he, smilin sweetly, 'and yol
hev yoor reward in the conshusnis uV
doin yoor duty. Look and see whe1
Mr.. Nasby's applicashun comes in, ht
sed, turnin to a clerk.
'28, i replied the clerk.
'We are now considerin 254, replied
the Postmaster General. 'We shell gi
to yoors, 1 shood say, in about thre'
yeers, possibly yeer later. Goo(
mornin i
And I wuz hustled out uncermoni
ously.
Is this Dimocrisy? Is this the wa.
we who electid Cleveland are to b
treated? l lived in Washington a wee
by going into the bars Nv frst-clas
hotels wher ther custom is sich tha
they can't demand payment in advanc
because Senators and Congrismen pa
ternlze EN-, me and another patriot frol
Moo York. He wood address me
: we met, ez eff by chance:
Good mornin, Senator !
And l wood promptly respond:
Good mornin, General
This very loud so't the bar-keep'
wood heer us. / hev the same gener;
t appearance Nv most Nv the nooly-elec
| ed Dimekratic Senators, and the in
: posishen wuz easy.
= Then l wood ask the Moo Yorker
S take suthin, and when we he'd toe
4 suthin l wood hawtily remark, 'Cha
it down 7 and walk out. 1t worke
several times, but the trouble Nv de-
beetin fur likker is that after 700 git
many drinks down yoo lose yoor pro
! dence, and the result is bein kick
out. Myself and the friend from No