davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04

A COY coQUETTE.

Ezekiel Moses, leah, me sahl
Don't be crowdin' quite so clus;
Luff dat lamp alone, too, please, sab,
Else dey's gw:ne to be fuss.
Took dat han from off my shoulder
P'raps We tink I'm no count trash;
Ebery night we git more bolder--
Tink yer smart to be so brash.
What dye praise dat Calline foah?
If dat gal s so mighty dear,
Leah dis kitchun, dar's de doah:
Oourtdat Calline. What do keer?
Course keer-T-don't be leabin';
But yer nuff to rile a saint!
Amt yer shamed yo self for bleabin'
Callines liam some when she hain't?
Please, now, don't git wuss' n ebber-
: Keep dar now-oh, well,
If yer tarmined-ktsS me? Nebber!
Stop dis instep or I'll yelll
Well If you amt tarned bashfull
Pshaw! who'd hab man wild skeersP
Oar, now, don't git ober rashful,
Fo' de fack I'll box your ears.
Bless me! what's de use OBJ sistin'?
Cause yer boun' to hab yer way.
Not afore one week-now, listen
Say jess one week from dis day?
Marry nowi and what's de harm int?
Ezekiel Moses why, fo' shame!
How blush! Well, If yer 'tarmned,
dat beats Calline les de same.)
&C. III. Turner, fai ". 7. Mail and Efpres
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04
EL MAHpI.


A Hint 60 Good Boys who Desire I'm
formation of Current Events.
A boy about twelve years of age en-
tered store on Michigan Avenue the
other day and asked for the proprietor,
and when confronted by that individual
the lad hesitatingly inquired:
Ell wanted to ask you for some in.
formation about El Mahdi. Man up
the street said you were posted, and
that you'd be glad to help boy along"
Yes said the proprietor as he
scratched his ear-''iess so. Ell Mahdi
Yes. Say, bub, I'm awfully busy
this morning. Ask the cashier, and
here's quarter for you. / like to help
a boy along, but I'm rushed this morn
ing"
The boy went down to the cashiers
desk and said:
"'Nother boy and me are seeing who
oan find out the most about FL Mahdi.
Please tell me all you know"
"El Mahdi-y-e-s, replied the cash
Ter. Hang It'll I've read of him dozen
times over, and the name is very IA
miliar. Y-e-s-iess so. Say, bub, our
foor-walker knows everybody and
everything. Here's fifteen cents for
you If you don't bother me to-day"
The boy passed along to the gentle
man mentioned and said:se..-
"My teacher wants me to find out all
can about FL Mahdi. Where was he
born-how old is he-what does he do
for living please give me ali the facts
you camps
Tka floor-walker looked the innocent
boy in the eye for a long half-minute.
Then he pulled quarter from his vest
pocket passed it over, and kindly whis-
pered:
'tNot to-day, my son, but some other
day. They'll probably tell you next
door, as they aren't rushedr' Detroit
Free Press.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04
CRACK sTEPPERs.

A Mild Species of Insanity with which
? Old and Young Are Often Afflicted.
''See that man over thereP" ex-
claimed a gentleman to reporter yes
terday, pointing to an old man who was
walking down Chestnut Street in front
Of Independence Hall; the old fellow
had his head bent and seemed in deep
thought. That's crack stopper -
"A crack stepperr
"H'm; you watch him and see how
he walks. He won't step on a single
crack between the fiag-stones, no mat
ter how it inconveniences him. There
are a quantity of men who are in the
habit of stepping over the cracks in
fia9stone pavements; it's a mild form
of insanity; | do it myself occasional
ly.h
so do II
''Do youP Well, most city men do.
Children play games in this way and
men keep it up all their lives. Some
times they vary it by stepping on all the
cracks and taking particular care not to
miss one There goes an other"
In the course of a hah-hour no less
than fourteen men were observed going
up and down this pavement stepping
over the cracks. OF fifteen men taken
at random, twelve acknowledged that
they occasionally practiced this peculiar
habit. They said they didn't know why
they did it, and sometimes did it uncon-
sciously, but the interesting fact re-
mains that about seVenty-five per cent.
of city men are crack steppers.-PAiLG.
CieJDhta Times.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04
PRACTICAL.
The Editor Who Didn't Appreciate a wit
ticism.


A fat old man who should have known
better dragged himself up three long
flights of stairs and entered an editorial
room.
"Whew! Coming up these stairs
makes me blow he said.
Yes the editor replied. What
can do for youP"
The old fellow laughed as he took a
small piece ofpaper from tin spectacle
case. .Here's something that / jotted
down. he said. ''You needn't put
my laughed heartily my name to
it,
The editor took the scrap of paper
and read the following:
"'If a war should occur between En-
gland and Russia it would be a Wall
Street affair-between the Bull and the
Bear
"Wall Street viii have nothing to do
with it, said the editor.
20. don't you seep 1t is a pun that |
made up myself.
No. I don't see. 1t appears to read
all right, though if there were really
ANYTHING of it the telegraph would
have,
Hand it here!" The old fell
low snatehed his contribution and
lugged himself down stairs, ArkansGw
TTGoeIer.
Thirteen hundred houses were built
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04
A Great General.

Major John A. Rudd, formerly of the
Confederate army of the Southwest, and
who met Grant and his men on the
CORY field of battle several times, said
to the Hatchet yesterday:
''Grant was great General. He has
never been given full credit for his
ability nor the full measure of his good
ness of heart. General Grant is loved
by the Southern soldiers, to whom he
has always been true friend. Should
he die they will be found among the
most sorrowful of the mourners at his
bier. But l hope he may yet survive
the treatment of his scientific at
tendants. Some people in the South
complained of certain Objectionable
things that General Grant did. To
these he said: i am simply enforcing
the laws as found them on the statute
book. The best way to get rid of bad
law is to enforce it strictly ="
Major Rudd related the following
anecdote of the great Captain:
Il called on him several years ago in
behalf of a certain ex-Union officer who
was incarcerated in the Missouri State
prison, unjustly in my opinion. Imade
plain statement of the case to him and
concluded with the remark that, as a
Confederate soldier who had been shot
all to pieces, l asked that the facts in
the case be given the attention they
deserved. General Grant replied: The
matter shall be attended to- On the
following day the Union veteran was
released. Grant saw the injustice of
his Incarceration at once, and acted
promptly, and in the same manner that
he struck his telling blows during the
war. - Washington Hatchet.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04

There is not an acknowledged
sinner on Block Island. the quaint ocean
resort off the Rhode Island shore. All
the inhabitants claim to have been con.
verted in one winter revival some years
ago,-M Y. Sun,
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04

"A correspondent sends the follow
ing account of a mistake made by a
little girl in his vicinity. She always
joins the family in reading the Script
ures during the family devotions, taking
her verse in turn. She easily reads the
shorter words. but needs some help on
the longer, but is always eager to pro-
nounce all the words herself and some
times guesses. Recently it came her
turn to read the verse: ''No man can
serve two masters. for either he will
hate the one and love the other, or else
he will hold to the one and despise the
other. Ye cannot serve God and Mann
mon.n She made a slight variation at
the end and finished the verse: "Ye
cannot serve God and women. CHI
cago Tribune.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04

New York BARRIERS put mustaches
In curl papers IN order to give them a
fine curl by the time their owners have
been shaved or had their hair cut.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04

Thirteen hundred houses were built
last year in Washington, at cost Of
$1,000, 600,
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1885-01-30

1t takes twenty-six large trunks ana
n hat-box to hold Adelina Pattis uav~
cling wardrobe. y Sun.
There are 623 newspapers and Pc
riodicals published IN foreign languages
IN this country. OF these 4o5 are IN
German.
The newspaper business In Texas
must be good The editor Of the In
ling Wasp offers to pay $4,000 for the
arrest Of the person who stole his hand
axe.
Washington " Gregg. the clerk Of
NJ. Boston Common Council. has re-
signed. Mr.. Gregg j. eighty-two years
III age. and he has held his position for
fortv-two years. Boston journal
The following thrilling sentence il
taken from a recently-published society
novel: For a whole quarter OF an
hour the young man gazed thougnt,
| fully in the flame Of the extinguished
| candle"
Captain j. p. Holm, who died In
Denmark few weeks ago. became
wen known to the American public
through his confinement in Massa-
chusetts insane asylum at the request OF
his wife and son. In his will the old
man ignored his family and left $1,000
Tor free library in Maiden. Mass.
George w. Stainboch. a leading
merchant OF Nashville. Tenn, was mar
RED recently, and the Cumberland
Club. Of which he was member, pre-
pared TO give him a grand reception.
rhe reception was an elegant affair.
and attended by the elite Of the city,
but the bride and groom 10 whom Il
was given we're absent The executive
committee had forgotten to invite them.
Chicago Inter Ocean.
: Thomas Van Vain. pensioner Of
the war of 1912, died at Syracuse, N.
". December rs. January IL he ceie-
brated his 10th birthday, and he was
conseiuently, within few days OF be
: INC lO5 wears old. Mr.. Van Vain was
: born in Duchess County, and was thu
son Of Abel Van Vain. who was acci
dentally killed at the age OF lO5 years
; His grandfather lived to be ll5. and
! brother Of his grandfather lived to tn
age Of l12 years. The latter lett thre
4 sons each OF whom was also centen
: arian: John Van Vain lived TO be ~
> wears old: Isaac, 10, and Joseph. lOs
y Syracuse Journal.
! A new man has taken editoris
! charge Of the Lockhart (Tex-) Register
9 and makes the following unique m
! nounccment: Il wish to state that
!, have not done this with a view 9
7, i amassing colossal fortune, for. havin
been engaged IL teaching school 4
a the last sixteen years. have saved
= pile. most Of which have invested
!, personal property in the shape OF
y one hundred and forty pound Texanes
H. have been for long time nndccidt
- whether to become mule-driver or
= editor. and. having at last made the IN
- portant decision. i shall endeavor
"A convince every one that ! would ma
= q good M. d.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1885-01-30
THE LOCOMOTIVE.



When locomotive rolled up to an
early East Tennessee town. and the en-
gincer. who was man Of small stature,
rot down to ..oil around. two mount
aineers looked at the engine for the first
time: they examined il critically, were
lost in admiration. thought II was "a
biz thing but a. one Of them sized up
the little engineer. he remarked; 1T
don't take much Of man to run her.
does il. Jim?'
But he didn't know il does look easy
"A boy might stand on the foot-board,
open and shut the throttle; but. Jim. 4
does take a good deal Of man to stand
there all through the hours Of day and
night. to know all the grades Of the
road. where he ..muSt make her red
hot and null her wide open 10 get To
T, the top Of the hill. and where to shut
her OF and let her roll:'i 1t does take
much Of a man to read the gauge, anu
know il the water j. low or If there .
plenty: to know when she i working
easily or laboring hard; 70 feel her pulse.
A. It were. rs he starOls in his place, and
tell whether all is well; and then. Il she
lets down. il does take much Of
man to know just what to do to discon-
meet aud block her up.
II does take much Of a man when
there is 4 stretch Of track to take long
look ahead or peer around curves. to
watch the track for anything that may
be in the way. and If there should be "a
tree. rock, or broken rail, or mis-
placed swifch--then there must b.
man Mt the throttle, one who has the
nerve TO do any act quickly: one who
has brains 10 think with. and = strong
arm 10 act; one who loses sight 81 him.
self and thinks Of those behind him, al
unconscious Of any danger. Il win take
man then. Jim. 10 apply the brake. ts
s.throw her over and give her steam.
There Is the gauge to watch and th'
water; the track must be watched anc
! the signals II they are red O
green. II Is watch. watch. all the time
: think and remember every figure on tn
| time-card and the mile-post and the sta
: ton, and the yellow tissue paper the tel
4 egraph man gave him al the last sta
! ton verify. eternal vigilance j. IN
! price Of his life Yes. Jim. II does tax
!. much OF a man to run her.-- AZ
~ Pointer.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1885-01-30
! WOMAN WHO NEVER oossIPs.

!. never would gossip. There isn't a woman
More close mouthcd than J am. There
, n'.ra . NM ~, and out Of the other.
And little they'd know 4 they waited Tor
To ,cl ''' 81 repeat what see or hear
I'm "a woman who never co"in F"~S'P' ny
dear.
. But, Mrs. smith. really, can NOT help tell
-, Anna Maria. she's coming home soon
FROM visit 70 Mary brown over Ia Temple
she sass tina, the wash hasn't been out III
on. Wee" since she's been there; now amt
M, Mary : slattcrn by nature and name.
when Harry 'rown married said twas no
Takiny 4 iiennet,, they're a shiftless. poor
Ana tbc browns are forehandcd, You might
"a, the, re- ~tingy;
Iwarnei HIM beforehand, but small thanks
ror ad DIil your ncighbors. I've found
They r. sure 10 resent IL whatever you do.
!. ~sw wo,,la vou believe Elizabeth Cameron
Llcw into 4 passion and called me y hen.
A meddlcgoule hen. when ] tod hcr inc
Thai s,,n tiirtcd too much with the young
who hoard III her mothcr'sy How was &c
Teov wepe friends Of her brothers, and one
was her tcauf
(. Did YOU notice Miss white wore blue dress
last sunday -
For maiden OF forty don't that 1901
rather guyf
And Miss Tucker told me-but don't "a
that said ~o--
e she's trying 10 marry old Dr. FREQ tray:
NO fools Ike an old fool 50 may be ~
she'll live 20 repent IL. between me ana you
a.. The Greens have lost money, and. pray q
not mention u
But hi- wife and his mother can neve
ngrcc:
He told me 20 yesterday In strictcSt conf
dancc.
ButI don't want 4 told ~ coming from M
don't cal II gcs.lplng Just telling you.
must 20 now; come over real -ocn' pleas
N. y. Ledger.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1885-01-30
REALLY COLD.
Talk with a Canadian About the
Weather In Manitoba.
How the Farmer Drcsses--what lie Eats
His Daily Life The Intense Heat ~ the
surnmer--keeping Warm
In winter.

.Cold!, said Canadian from VI,
nipeg to representative Of the New
York SIN. during the cold snap few
DAYS ago. "Cold. Why surely you
don't cal this cold. Up in my country
il is occasionally so cold At this season
Of the year that the COWS give ice cream
when they are MIXED. tell you that
there can be no friiling with the cold
NJ there. Look at the way we dress.
In winter we all wear furs. The police
men ut Winnipeg have buffalo coats
down To their heels. and every man.
rich or poor. in the Northwest must
wear a fur cap. I have known the cold
10 penetrate the skull Of man who
went out one day with an ordinary felt
hat. and brain-fever carried him on IN
three davs The streets II Winnipeg
inst now are full Of men who move
about like animals in menagcrie-cagcs.
You see nothing but beaver and otter.
and Persian lamb and seal, and mink
end raccoon. and martcn and muskrat.
and all the furs that ever adorned the
Goths or Ostro-GothS. who first brought
the choice furs Of the North 10 Southern
and Central Europe. And the sleighs
are covered with black and brown b mr.,
and grizzly skins and buffalo robes.
while an occasional Astrakhan gives
evidence of luxury and costly furs-
Without fur~ we could not live in win
ter M in that country. We not only
use them rs articles Of luxury. rs the
Chinese use the erminc. sable or tie
fiery fox. but we are Obliged 10 use
them ~ articles If necessity. And cv-
ery piece Of skin is utilized. The hardy
yoyageurs and courcurs du bois drcs-
themselves in bucSsin with head-dre5ses
OF wolf. lynx. badger or wildcat hides
while silver and bluc-fox furs may bs
seen on the heads Of the rich. A mar
must be very hard up in Winnipeg who
does not own fur coat. cap and glove
or mittens. A walk through the streets
may be turned into lesson in natura
history BY those who read As they run
In fact great many people buy NOR
expensive furs than they can afford
Winter Is our season Of extravaganza
and in our attempt 70 possess cost
furs we often 20 ruinously beyond on
means.
'.As for the cold" he continued. y
Is severe. but we do not feel il A. muc
AZ YOU might fancy. We arr dreSse
for il. and our houses are built 10 resis
1t. All our houses have double door
and double windows. Fires are, I
course. kept going night and day. W
are not much out Of doors in wintc
and yet nearly everybody gets frostbi
ten Mt times. When we see man Q
the street with white spot on h
cheek or nose we stop and point 70 u
afflicted part He will understand |
once. II the weather Is very cold v
cant spc.k 70 each other very wei
for our mustachcs freeze TO our bears
and form crust Of Ice over our mouth
We must thaw this of before we ca
talk. On the plains. sonnet mes. ma
il frozen ~ death. but this does not Of
en- happen. Il II no joke to be caug|
in . blizzard on the prairies. Il ha
pened Ia me once little north
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1885-01-30

hotter IN Winnipeg than il v IN New
York. But here. too. we are ahead ~
Won people In some things. A. We
dress for the winter in fur-. We dress
for the summer in becoming way.
Down here man j. supposed 10 SILVER
IN tall black hat and kid gloves IN
winter with pair 81 cariaps making
him hidcous. while Ia summer he h. ex-
rerted 10 change the color Of the hat
only. while he roasts under an oyercoat
which he calls a duster. II = very dii-
ferent with us. In summer we wear
thick helmets with good ventilation,
and we keep the sun on our heads
while we have plenty Of air. We all
wear light ciothc-. suited 10 the season,
and flannel shirts with flannel collar
attached are general even among tn
wealthy When these are white they
are becoming. and nothing else j. SC
cool. Then we wear white canvas shoes
and il we dress for comfort we alst
dress with taste. But we are worried
with lilies. They come In millions
There are black flies. mosquitoes. bull
dogs and sand f;cs or bits. and cant SCI
EN-. n the Indians call them.
..As for the Indians. they never bother
rs. But do not fancy that the Indians
IN the Canadian Northwest are quiet
because Of the paternal POLICY Of TIE
Canadian Government That j. pop
ular dehsion. The Indians are quiet.
Or have been. because the Hudson la,
Company. which had judicial and com
mercial control Of the country Tor near
H. two centuries. treated them wei. II
Wa. To the interest OF the Hudson bay
Company TO be on good terms with IN
Indians. and the fact that in their long
intercourse with the Indians the com
pany had only one of their number
, killed is sufficient proof of the friendly
, relations which existed between the red
skins and the whitemen all over ths
( Canadian Northwest. ! have hear'
! factors. a the managers Of the Hudson
, Bay post, are called. say that they al
| WAYS gave trust to the Indians IN IN
= old DAYS. and that the Indians Away
/ paid their indebtedness: that there wer
Z VERY few disputes. and those that ~
a occur were always settled BY the lega
4 author ties. and in conformity with IN
4 methods Of the Indian rs well as tho
|. Of the white man. You see the Hudso
= Bay Company wanted nothing from Ia
q Indian but his furs. and 20 long as IN
q Indian was not robbed Of his land .
d looked on the Hudson Bay Company
|. benefacior. and II was TO his intere'
N TO carry out his obligations and preser'
K peace and order We never had Al
= trouble with the Indians until the Ca
+ adam Government bought the Norll
"a western territories from the Hudson ID
% Company for $500. 900. the cheape
20 purchase ever made. Now few OF Y
n Indians are uneasy because we are Ia
inr their lands. But il does not amou
n TO anything.
~ about immigration well. we ha'
~ been disappointed, confess, and q
~ country will not be peopled as fast
II we anticipated. But as we grow
~ difficulties in our way VII be remove
~ Just as they have been in every 9th
~ country. l am not afraid Of our
- iure.
With this the Canadian buttoned
y. coat and departed. ~. \. Sun
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1885-01-30

A Calculation which Exhibits startling
Conclusions.


Few people ever stop TO count the
cost Of Injuries. II they should they
might sometimes hesitate in their cx-
pcnditures. A wealthy octogcnarian OF
Hartford. who has INDUCED in smoking
during all his life, or at least during all
his manhood wears. has made an esti-
mate. based upon data kept, a. to tho
cost of his cigars for sixty-seven years.
He knows the amount he has expended,
and calculating the sum invested IN
cigars every six months. and placing Il
~ compound interest at eight per cent,
on the basis Of the savings bank caicu-
lations. he finds that the total sum now
amounts tn S2Oo.OOO.
II All smokers Of the weed would
keep an account Of the cost OF this lux
ury' ana calculate their investments IN
cigars and tobacco. with compound IN.
terest added. they would BE- astonished
~ the sums wasted by them in smoke.
The large sum found by the gentleman
who had smoked for sixty-sevcn years
was Of course greatly increased IN the
last twenty. and especially IN the last
| Ten wears. as money compounded every
six months at the rate Of six per cent
doubles In little over ten years.
We frequently hear OF incorporate
persons drinking up the value Of = iaru
or other property. But i y not oitel
that such fortune as $20O.OO0 i con
sumcd in smoke by one person. II TIN
Hartford gentleman Is not an exception
Al smoker. then the aggregate cost
smoking is simply enormous. B.ra'
Times.