The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1885-02-10
TOO MANY CANDIDATES.
Tnbuiatcr Chase's Conference and What
Came of HI.

TO the Editor of the Press:
1t has come and it has gonel The great un-
resting brain of Tabulator Chase had devised a
scheme for an easy, cheap and swift distribu-
ton of the offices in Maine that are to be re-
wards to the faithful Democracy.
He was the chairman of the Maine Chicago
delegation, defunct body to BIS sure, but still
superior to the defunct State Democratic Com
mittee OF last year, inasmuch as it could by no
possibility get up new one and elect new
chairman, as in the famous case of Brown VS..
Cromwell.
"Well," the Tabulator said to himself
something must be done and I know it. I
will call together in some interior town, far
removed from Mugwumps, Mossbacks and
Young Democracy. that infringe upon the
borders of the Hon. Chas. Fl. Chase party,
the board OF delegates to Chicago, the Demo-
cratic electors, candidates for Governor and for
Congress, and will order Brown to summon
the State committee. But no; guess I'm too
fast, far when 1 elected the Hon. Simon s.
Brown, formerly member of the Council under
me, ex-Republican, late Greenbacker and pres
ent Democrat, were there not eight unregener-
ate men who could not accept the efulgence of
my genius and my labor. Mol those eight
mon shall not participate in the feast 1 will
prepare. Watervlle shall be the place and
February 4th the time"
1t was a glorious scheme and the face of the
Tabuator was radiant with joy and emotion.
They came some of them, q few of thema
The Tabulator took the chair with grace and
dignity. Mr.. Rundlett, the secretary, was
furnished by the Captain with large book
for business.
Then the Captain raised his voice 1.-The
very same voies that had so often been heard
as the eloquent Bradbury once said, "aboye
the din of the storm and the rush of mighty
water" and with that expression of grave
thoughtfulness which sometimes creeps over
his face when his brain is working, opened the
meeting and stated its objects somewhat as fol-
lows:
Fellow Citizens and. Fellow Delegates
These are momentous times and something
must be done. That's so and 1 know it. A
Democratic President has been elected and
still Republicans hold the offices. 1t must not
be 80. Let us proceed to business. Let us
nominate and elect men to all the Offices"
"The first business in order, gentlemen, is to
confirm the appointment Of Charlie Morton to
ley, an Offensive PARTISAN and il that is
your pleasure you will say aye"
One unanimous shout in the affirmative and
the Tabulator said, SIT is a vote; Mr. Morton
is elected postmaster"
"Next in order is the surveyor of Portland,
for which l am unanimously selected by good
mon everywhere. You will prepare your bal
lots for Chas. III. Chase for surveyor"
Here the din became indescribable. Every
man was on his feet, shouting, II object, L OBJ
ject, Mr.. Chairman" No pen can describe
the scene and its effect upon the eountenance
of the genial aud generous Tabulstor "What
does it mean?" he murmured; SIS there re-
bellion in my camp? Has that infamous
Cromwell been sowing seeds of discord among
my faithful followers? Was L not elected a
delegate to Chicago against my wish by
trict? Does not everybody love me and work
for me and pray for me without ceasing9
Something's wrong. 1 will adjourn"
Then appeared the full length and breadth
and depth of his immortal geuius-the man
who alone land Fogg) met and defeated the
cohorts of excited Republicans who rushed up
on the political household of Garcelon the
First, the Jacksonian.
"Gentlemen." he said, 81 think this has
gone far enough. We have accomplished the
object for which 1 called you and elected Nor
ton. True, there were few other things 1
wanted attended to, but waive them. On
the whole it is better not. L adjourn this
meeting" Then with one solemn wave of his
mighty hand, after the manner in which he
silenced Cromwell at Chicago, he dissolved the
session.
1t had suddenly become manifest that every
man present was candidate, for the surveyor
ship first, for anything next, and they then
and there could not fill them all. More anon.
MN.