New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1885-05-20
BILL NYE ON THE srARA
Tho Ex-Postmaster About to Retire from Sci.
entif1c Research.

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Tho Ex-Postmaster About to Retire from Sci.
entiic Research.
There is much in the great field of
astronomy that is discouraging to the
savant who hasn't the time nor means
to rummage around through the heav-
ems. At times I am almost hopeless,
and feel like saying to the great,
yearnful, hungry world, ..Grope on
forever. Do not ask me for another
scientific fact. Find 1t out yourself.
Hunt up your own new-laid planets,
and let me have rest. Never ask me
again to set up all night and take care
of newborn world while you lie in
bed and reck not"
/ get no salary for examining the
trackless void nj ht after night when
| ought to be in bed. l sacrifice nv
j health in order that the public may
know, at once, of the presence of
red-hot comet, fresh from the factory
And yet, what thanks do l get?
1t is surprising that every little
while contemplate withdrawing from
scientific research to go and skin an
eight-mule team down through the
dim vista of relentless years?
Then, again, you take certain
style of star, which, you learn from
Prof. Simon Newcomb, is at such
distance that 1t takes so, 900 years for
its light to reach Boston. Now. we
will suppose that, after looking over
the large stock of new and second
hand stars, anG after examining the
spring catalogue and price-list de-
eide that one of the smaller size will
do me and l buy it. Howdo l know
it was there when l bought it? Its
cold and silent rays may have ceased
$4,000 years before l was born, and
the intelligence be still on the way.
There is too much margin between
sale and delivery. Every now and
then another astronomer comes to me
and says: professor, | have discover
ed another new star and intend to file
it. Found it last night about a mile
and half south of the zenith, running
loose. Haven't heard of anybody who
has lost star of the fifteenth magni-
tude, about thirteen hands high, with
light name and tail. have you?' Now,
how do know that he has discovered
a brand new star? How can discov-
er whether he is or is not playing an
old thread bore star on me fora new
one?
We are told that there has been no
perceptible growth or decay in the
star business since man began to roam
around through space, in his mind,
and make figures on the barn door
with red chalk showing the celestial
timetable.
No serious accidents have occurred
in the starry heavens since began to
observe and study their habits. Not
a star has waXed, not a star has waned
to my knowledge. Not planet has
asoncracked or shown any of the
injurious effects OF our rigorous eli
mate. Not a star has ripened prema-
Iurely or fallen off the trees. The var
nisn on the very oldest stars find, on
close and critical examination, to be
in splendid condition. They will all,
40 doubt, wear as long as we need them,
and wink on long after we have ceased
to wink back.
In 1866 there appeared suddenly in
the northern crown a star of about
the third magnitude, and worth at
least $3.50. 1t was generally conceded
by astronomers that this was brand
new star that had never been used,
put upon consulting Argelander's star
catalogue and price list it was found
that this was not new star at all.
but an old, faded out star of the ninth
magnitude, with the front breadths
turned wrong side out and trimmed
with moonlight along the seams
After few days of phenomenal
brightness it gently ceased to draw
salary asa star of the third magnitude.
and walked home with an Uncle TOMS
Cabin company.
1t is such things as this that make
The life OF the astronomer one of con-
slant and discouraging toll. l have
long contemplated, as l say, the ad
visibility OF retiring from this field of
science and allowing others to light
the northern lights, skim the milky
way and do other celestial chores. [
would do it myself cheerfully if nv
health would permit, but for years l
have realized, and SO has nv wife,
that my duties as an astronomer kept
me up too much at night, and nv wife
is certainly right about it when she
says if l insist on scanning the heavens
hight after night, coming home late
with the cork out OF my telescope and
my eyes red and swollen with these ex-
hausting vigi]s, will be cut down in
my prime. So 1 am liable to abandon
the great labor to which had intended
to devote my life, my dazzling genius
and my princely income. [ hope that
other savants will spare me the pain of
another refusal, for my mind IS fully
made up that, unless another skim
mist is at once secured, the milky way
will henceforth remain unskum.-
Boston Globe.
Going to War in Pullman.