Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1885-10-22
MIR. PATTERSON'S MISTAKE
q Chance Proposal, and It's
Happy Result.

Peter Patterson was ill--at least he
thou-ht so-and depressed; he had .
head achc: and he hated the dusty
Streets, in which the summer heat
burnt and the summer sun shonc before
she Green leaves had draped the trees,
and pottcd geraniums, which had come
10 be SO blessadly popular in New York,
lent their summer freshness.
"What shall l do, doctor?' he said
10 the white-headed old physician.
~'lou say nothing ais me, but l can
tell what my feelings are better than
You can. know l shall be down with
something soon. | rode in car with
a half-dozen dirty children the other
day to The smallpox hospital,
haven't a doubt very red and nasty
looking, all of them; and while | was
buying something in store down
Broadway the other dav borrid old
woman begged of mc because her hus-
band was sick with typhoid fever. No
doubt have caught both diseases, and
ats the COMPLICATION that puzzles YOU.
fouldn' t relish my coffee this morning;
left nay III lk-toast untouched. Hateful
life, that of bachelor at hotel. Oh,
dear me-"
why don't you marry, then?" said
the DOCTOR
They need so much counting said
PATTERSON. "Iou spend six months or so,
at lea t, dangling at n woman's apron
strings. You must 60 to the theater
and opera if she is gay, and to church
il she is pious At Fifty man likes his
81 ppers and dressing-gown and chair
OF an evening If it was just stepping
over to the clergyman's and getting
married, putting a ring on her finger
and saying or nOdding yes two or
'hree times. why, l wouldn't mind it,
You know"
''Ah, well, counting is the fun Of it
all. in my opinion said the old
doctor, - but every one to his taste.
And my advice to you is to get out into
the country"
ITO another hotel and more merce-
nary waiters.' said Mr. Patterson
No" said the doctor; "go to a
nice. private home. l know one-a
motherly widow lady, who cooks din
ner fit for Il King. River before the
house, woods behind it, orchard to the
left, kitchen garden to the right; no
fever ana ague; no mosquitoes Heav-
cnly. | am going up there tomorrow,
and I'll see if she'll take you.'
Very well" said MIR. Patterson; Il
think L will try it,
''And you must drink plenty of milk
and eat plenty of nice homemade
bread" .....-t
'.Ycs, will" said Patterson, over
loyed at last at hearing something
that sounded like prescription. 'And
You would advise m lk?'
Quart of it every day." said the
doctor.
in take a note of it, said Patter-
son, land if should be very ill shs'n
nurse me-"
"Splendidly." said the doctor, and
went his way.
Mr. Patterson thought the matter
over and thought better Of il every day.
and when the little note informing him
that the widow would be willing to
take him in and do for him. reached
him, he had his trunk and portmanteau
already packed, and was already to
start that afternoon. AS for the widow,
the doctor had prepared her for her
boarder's peculiarities thus:
Mice fellow; social; plenty of
money; thinks himself ill, but isn't:
ought TO be married; told him So but
he hates the idea OF counting; marry off
some day. no doubt; will you have
me?' Yes Call in clergyman. Over.
Very peculiar old bachelor, but then
old bachelors are peculiar, generally"
The widow was what the Yankees
call an amazing smart woman. She
had married at sixteen, and had never
failed to have her washing over when
other people We're hanging out theirs.
Her bread always rose, her cake was
always good and her butter always
sweet. At forty-tive she had married
OFF all her daughters, was well-to-do,
buNom and happy.
Her son and his wife boarded with
her. and she added to her plentiful saw
ings by taking summer boarder or
two. if they happened to offer.
Fifty and bachelor said Mrs
Muntle, looking in the glass. well,
it seems \ pity; but wheI elderly gem
tlemcn marry it Is to some hity-tity girl
that leads them a terrible life, and
likely il 5 for the best
Then she looked in the glass again:
for the widow was but woman, after
all.
Mr.. Patterson came to the widows
and obeyed the doctors prescription
carefully. He ate bread and milk,
robbed the orchards like school-bov.
and reclined over the straw berry short
cake after a fashion that would have
made his reputation at the bar. Then,
too. Mrs. MLntle did not smile at his
aches and pans and insist that he must
be rerpeiualiY well because he had
fresh complexion and dimples in his
checks. She had savorv herb teas and
potions whicn she produced when he
complained OF feeling miserable. and
she had that blessing for all hypocon-
driacs. homeopathic box in the house
There were remedies in that box for
everything; and it was pleasant to find
that when there was a crawling sensa-
ton in your flesh, or kind of an un-
easy feeling in your legs. there were
daily little globules to be had just
suited for Your symptoms; that to fad
laa'saa very sakTy about nothing In