The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1885-01-01

ioT SnTlStlan stomach.
"Old Bobberts is close hand" said
John Raney, "no doubt of that"
"No doubt at all" said the farmer.
IL don't quite see. John, how we came
to be associated with him in buyin' this
machine"
Because we we're precious pair of
fools,' said Mr.. Raney, cheerfully.
"An' then" cried Farmer Sweet,
"fur all the old coon wuz so crazy fur
the machine, an pestered us to death
to go thirds with him, you can't make
him own now that he likes the old
thrasher, or feels in any way beholden
to US. 'Twuz only this mornin' says
to him. well, farmer, how dye like
the machine, now you've seen her
a-goin'Y oh, $3.50, a,ys he. 'Sho','
says |, you ought ter come out strong
er than that Mr.. Bobberts. Think
what a savin' of labor it is.' WELL
says lie, jest fur pure contrainess, 4
aip't sho' but that I like the old way
best j; it wuz more sociable like. Now,
you see the neighbors will all be
a-wantin' ter borrow the machine, an
we may regret ever a-purchasin' Of it,
An then he sithed, as hypocritical rs
q preacher ut o strange funeral"
John Raney wuz the greatest fellow
fur joke on the perarer, an wicked
thought come ajumpin' inter his mind.
"Say," cried he, II ain't overproud
Of ownin' anything along with old
Bobberts. Let's burn up the whole
rig, an clear out"
Burn her?" said Farmer Sweet,
his eyes a-starin' carter all the money
we've put in her ?"
"We'd never ha' got much satisfac-
tion out of her." said Rainey. "Bob-
berts would always want her jest when
our wheat wuz ready; an what joke
it would be on him Jest ter take him
at his word fur once, an tell him We
thought the old way wuz best as we'll
as he."
Farmer Sweet begun ter laugh.
"All rig ht," said he; Ego ahead"
An then an there them two men
act'ally did set fire ter that thrashin'-
machine. mustn't forget ter say that
some folks always declared that the
fire wuz IN accident, an that them
two men made up the tale of burnin' it
themselves jest ter devil Mr.. Bobberts.
When Bobberts came out an saw
the thing in a blaze, it set him in the
biggest rage ever seen Oh the Nine
mile.
eve thought you would like it,"
says Farmer Sweet, artless ms baby,
"seein' how you liked the machine
only $3.50, an the old way wuz the
best"
Glow dared you meddle with my
property 7" howls Mr.. Bobberts.
Majority rules" says John Raney,
cool as Christmas.
Then Mr.. Bobberts up an struck
John, an John hit back with such
goodwill that it ended in fight that
came near endin' Mr.. Bobberts.
Well, we'll it wuz good many
years ago that this happened, an no.
body supposed Mr.. Bobberts wuz lay
in up anything ag'inst John Raney.
He wuz very friendly with both him
an Farmer Sweet, an I did hear that
they had paid him back every cent Of
the money he had put inter the ma
chine. They wuz willin' ter pay fur
their joke after they had their fun out
Of it, an it wuz considered very hand
some of them on the prarer.
H..
AS I wuz a-sayin', bad year came
fur the farmers. Nobody felt like
maxim much O Christmas. We
hadn't any fatted calves, an all the
turkeys an gineral fowls had been
traded fur store goods. So when the
news came that Preacher Snowden wuz
goin' ter spend Christmas on Nine
mile it wuz quite question where he
would put up, fur he wuz pretty fond
Of the fesh-pots. He took hii, cram
before sermon an after but he wiz a
good Hard-sheii Baptist, and sound
on the doctrine. But I must say it
always went agin me ter hear him say
that hell wuz paved with infants
skulls not half a span long.
He wuz the curiousest preacher I
ever sot under. He would take text,
an stick to it pretty we'll fur while,
coneiderin' he hadn't no eddication !:
but when the exhortin' mood came on
him, an he got good warmed up, he
would drop chapter an verse, an
wander wild an Tree, as the song sec.
He had @ way, 700, of pickin' out
some text an maxim it mean some
thing entirely different from what you
had always supposed. II fact eech
wuz that old mans contraines an
pig-headedness an conceit of himself
that he made nothin' of arguin' ag'inst
the Scripter. I s'pose he amt the only
man who ever thought he knew more
than the Lord who made him, but he
wuz the fust ever I see ysI!:o brazenly
owned as much in the pulpit, an with
the Bible open before him.
He wuz sot agin new-fangled no.
tions, Preacher Showden wuz, an
made nothin' Of declarin' that, temper.
ance societies an Sunday.schools had
sent more people to hell than ever
they kept out of it. I never had any
thing effect me like that; an as fur
Jed Burridge, he jest muttered in his
whiskerS, Good help the people in this
country if they've got to set under
your preachin'!" An then, without
q word to me, Jed jammed his hat on
his head an walked ont gloomy as q
hearse. II couldn't set thar an stand
that" he remarked to me, apologize,