West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1885-05-08
CROOKED ANSWERS.
Startling Items Of Information
Furnished by School Children.

The knowledge attributed to the pro-
verbal "school-bOy" must always have
amazed any person of only ordinary in
tclhgcncc. Recent school examinations
have, however, revealed a depth and
variety of information possessed by
juveniles, which bids fair TO make the
! coming school boy throw his predeces-
sors quite into the shade. Amongst
many startling items of information
may he inStancel that "a fort is n place
to put men in and fortress a place
to put women i'm. ~ "A famine i'm the
land, " it appears, is what made the
Tower of Pisa lean; and COS the
moon is so changin'.' is the reason
why it is of different gender from the
sun. The surface of the earth consists
OF land and water said a bright Young
stcr; but when asked: What. then, do
land and water make?' he instantly re-
piled Mud. 50
In many cases, il is evident that the
pupils do not understand what the uues-
tions mean When inguiring: What
comes next to man in the scale of be-
- 80 - ihNhNi Nhl lll l0llE 10 Dt lOiN
that II is ''his shirt IL surely must
have Eeen the same boy who replied
that the chief end of man was: The
end what's got his head on. The first
man that went round the world was. i'm
n little girls opinion, "The man i'm the
moon" a consonant is a portion Of
land surrounded by water.f II was
daniel in the lions den" who said:
1t Is not good for man 10 lie alone"
and ''why the Israelitcs made golden
calf was: Because they hadn't
enough silver to make cow
Reports of School board examinations
will form quite a comic library What
would have happened if Henry ". Of
France had not been murdercd?" The
reply was: "IIe would probably have
died natural DEATH "Wherc was
Bishop Latimcr burned TO death?' I'm
the fire, ~ replied little fellow. looking
very grave and wise. An equally uncX-
pectcd reply was elected from a pupil
when asked: What did the Israeltes
do when they came out Of the Red
Sea?' "They dried themselves"
"What is the feminine Of friar?" First
bright boy: Hasn't any" Next"
Sec nd bright boy: Nun That's
right First boy. Indignantly: That's
just what ! saidn'
The following is still more ludicrous
A teacher asked juvenile class some
questions regarding their knowledge of
electricity, and inquired which Of them
had ever seen magnet One sharp
boy Immediately said he had seen lots
Of them. "Wherc?' inquired his in
structor. astonishcd at his proficiency
'1n cheese" was the ready reply.
But the good things are not all mo-
nopolized by the boys "Some little
girls were studying the history Of David,
the passage for the day being that
which describes the shepherd boys vic
tory over Goliath. The teacher asked
the question, Now. can any of YOU
little girls tell me who killed the gianlP'
Quic as thought one Of the smallest
responded Jack
An examination of girls in Board
schools for prizes offered by the Ma
tiOnal Health Society revealed some
curious items Of information One re-
ply to: Mention any occupations
considered injurious to health was.
Occupations which are injurious to
health are carbolic acid gas, which Is
impure blood Another pupil said
"a stone mason work is Injurious
N'.tt''' WIN Ai'. iH VII fI'iNE Ait bithNlitN
in all the little chips, and then they are
taken into the lungs" A third saws.
a bootmaker's trade is very iniuri
oUs, because the bOOtmakers press the
boots against the thorax; and there
fore. it presses the thOrax i'm, and 70
touches the heart; and if they do not
die. they are cripples for life With "a
beautiful decisivcness, one girl declares
that "ail mechanical work is injurious
10 health. A reply 90 question
about digestion nuns: q" We should
never cat fat. because the food does not
digest Another states that "whcn
food is swallowed, it passes through the
windppo; and that "the chylc flows
up the middle Of the backbone and
reaches the heart. where 20 meets The
oxygen, and is purified ' Another
says "The work of the heart IS 20 re-
pair the different organs in about half
minute. One little phyaologist re
plies: " We have an upper and
Ioruor akin tho I.Uror akfr rt,Yo. 81 a.