Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1885-09-08
THE AGE OF TATTOO.

Illuminated Linen as 1t Appears to Impress
Noted Humorist.
do wish the washee washee people |
Of the United States would call Ma
tional Convention Of laundcrs and |
.aundresses, and adopt uniform style
OF marking the linen that passes
through their hands. have suffered |
much from the diversity of talent dis
played in the private marks of Anglo,
German, Franco, Hibcrnian and Chi
ncsc- American laundrics. / am man
not given to novelties. l like variety,
but | want it to be the same kind of
variety. do not like to go around the
country lecturing in the guise of the
tattooed man of Borneo.
Now, when put on my war paint
and sarahed forth to seek whom !
might gather the lecture committees in
had my scanty store of linen marked
with the real init ais of my own hon.
orcd name-that Mrs 0'Mahony's hus-
band might know whose shirt he was
wearing to church, and Mile. Celeste
might know whose handkerchief she
stole, and that Wun Lung might be
able to swear that the collars he offered
for sale were given him by his deceased
friend, Ram Jam Bang. But did these
simple marks content the wash ladies
and laundry gentlemen? Nay, not so.
The first laundry gentleman marked
everything had with big black X in
indeiiblc ink, save only my excuse my
llushcs-hose. These dainty little
fabrics of silk and worsted, with faint
traces of cotton. he labeled by sewing
large, white patch about midships on
the a. ter part of the veal of the same.
! left all these marks on, hoping that
in connection with the regularly or
duincd in tails they would content the
neat washer gentleman. But he was
Trojan, and he put on mark
something Ike the Greek letters phi,
psi. This was in Philadelphia. AT
Pittsburgh had round up of my linen
ut the Great Western Satin Gloss Laun'
dry, where the man with the indelible
INK labeled everything XO, big and
black, and scwcd additional patches on
my-uhem! hose. next corralled my
things 1T the establishment of Ping
Ping in Columbus. o., who stitched
in Il fire cracker joke in red thread. We
l and my herd Of linen and manu-
script Dir it,d slowly to the North
west. and the wardrobe was watered a
n French laundry in Kalamazoo anC
branded OLA. At Minneapolis it wen
to tie hot laundry and came bacl
bearing the new legend 1T with
lozcngc around it, and with red tags OF
nv s-cks. Tbs was growing interest
ing, and when brand of blue ink cam
into the plot at Council Bluffs and wa
cast for XOA, sat up half the nigh
reading nv things. ] am fond OF liter
ntnre any how. and when the mcnta
pabulum on nv linen was reinforce'
1T Concordia, Kan, by the addition
OF VI in black circle to the bill G
fare, began to look about for pull
sher. At Kansas City Hang Hi worke
IN II crazy quilt stitch on me, and at DE-
cntur, Ill.,, the launder had rut
Ter stamp, the design whereof was
valentine heart, inclosing the letter
Nix. do not know the meaning c
tao symbol unless it refers to my age
which certainly has nothing to do wit
the age of my wardrobe. This ma
s,'wcd white tags on the ears of m
Stockings, with the same desig
printed on them. At Teri
llauic, Ind, they sewed tas
ON everything, from withers
hook, and at Valparaiso the
stitched XYH on the entire harnes
and at Upper Sandusky l got NY
mixed on everything from collar
crllpprr. At Beaver Falls, Pa,
Chinese gentleman embroidered on a
my things portions of II strange, well
lphabct whereverhe could find roo
Tor it. and at Uhrchsville, o., my linz
was returned to me with note stain
that all articles must be plainly marl'
before they could be received at tn
laundry.
Now, | want to know if this is fai
1t wasn't my fault that the other lau
dr,eS had used up all the available spa
On nv raiment before got to Uhrict
vile. ] don't really enjoy this sort
thing. When | wake in the night al
see my pallid shirt hanging over oh;
back in the moonlight | am frightene
being u nervous man, thinking tn
Captain Costentcnius, the tattoo
man OF the AntipodeS. has got into 1
room. appeal to the laundry men
adopt some uniform system. Let ca
free born American citizen who amas.
more than one shirt select his oN
brand, have it duly registered, pu
I:.l,I Il, ,l,,, ,O,oi,l ,nnnr Df tho norr