davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-03-21
or THE ARKANsAw TRAVELLER. I WANT TO BE A FUNNY MAN.
BY HAL BERTE.

want to be funny man, A Humorist-a Wit That may make the world resound With laughter till it split; want to banish frowns aud tears, By wholesale if l can, It is, in short, my aim in life
 To be Funny Man. Iwant to be Funny Man,
 And make atrocious puns, Iwant to write to funny sheets The very funniest ones, Iyearn to be like Holmes or Twain, A leader in the van; Iwould forego all other things
 To be Funny Man. want to be Funny Man,
 In England there are none, When Sydney Smith and Tom Hood diet She bade farewell to fun, So, every chance have to rise
 And free her from the ban Ny native land for thee yearn
 To be Funny Man. ENGLAND, Feb, 1885.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-03-21
The Oldest Tree.

Which is the oldest ree2 The elder, but the old mullein plant is the oldest in worth, for it is nov recognized of more value than cod liver oil in consumption. Taylor's Cherokee Remedy of Sweet Gum and Mullen will cure coughs, colds and consumption. Send two cent stamp to Walter A. Taylor, Atlanta, Ga, for Rid de Book.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-03-21

A we'll known 'Friscan married Can. adian girl four years ago and brought he, out to this land of eternal summer. The other day he found her sitting with he, feet on the refrigerator jingiing the din ner bell. She said she was SO homesick she had to do something.-,Sas FIas- riscs Posk
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-03-21

The "old reliable "-Dr. Sage's Ca- tarrh Remedy.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-03-21

Make ne~ blood with Browns Iron Tonic.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
Legal Blanks on Hand

Criminal Warrants, Land and Mort
gage Deeds, Justice Fifas and summon yes,
Waiver Notes, Summons of Garnishments
5arnishment Affidavit and Bond, Affidavit
Bond and Attachment, Writ Declaration of
Notes and Accounts and other Legal Blanks
for sale at the Journal Office
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
JOSH BILLNRS NEW PROVERBS.

The man who gets bit twice by the
same dog is better adapted to that
kind of business than any other.
There is a great deal of religion
in the world that is like life pre-
seryer-only put on at the moment
of immediate danger, and then half
the time put on wrong side before.
Experience is school where a
man learns what big fool he has
been.
The man who will not believe in
any hereafter has got a dreadful
mean opinion of himself and his
chances. There are two kinds of
fools in this world-those who can
not change their opinions and those
who will not.
Dat in the world men show us two
sides to their characters-by the fire
side only one.
The world is filling up with educa-
ted -mankinds reads too much
and learn too little.
Every man has his follies, and oft
times they are the most interesting
things he has got
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
New Advertisements
AUSTIN & GRIST
Received This Week

Received This Week
100 Dozen Straw Hats from l0c up to 81 80.
% Dozen Fine Fur Hats embracing all the
last styles at prices that defy competition.
The harder the times and the scarcer the
cash the more glorious the harvest for him
who has the real values for the money.
Remember that we keep one of the best
stocks Of Shoes that can be found anywhere.
Prices to suit everybody We can sell you
Shoes from soc per pair up to $500
AUSTIN & GRIST.
LAcEs AND HAMBURG. Large lot of Laces
and Hamburg Embroideries and fine Laces
of different styles at extremely low figures
at AUSTIN & CRISIS.
The incest thing out is our Grace Corset
only Scots 1t beats any corset ever sold
for the p,ice. AUSTIN & GRIST.
We can sell a real nice Crochet Quilt for
81 and 81 80 AUSTIN a. GRIST
The best sc Lawns at
AUSTIN & CRISIS.
Fans in endless variety at
AUSTIN & CRISIS.
Two cases of Opera Slippers at
AUSTIN Il CRISIS.
% dozen Gauze Shirts at
AUSTIN Il CRISIS.
Full line of Dress Shirts at
AUSTIN & CRISIS.
Large variety of Ladies and Misses Silk
and Lisle Gloves at
AUSTIN & CRISIS.
Go to Austin & Grist's and get you pair
of Suspenders.
Remember that we keep full line of
Groceries, Sugar, Coffee, Tobacco Snuff,
Cigars, Cigarettes, &c.
Launch your thunderbolts red hot among
the masses Settle at once the competition
and raking in the hard cash in your strides
to prosperity, stealing upon you almost I'M
awares, will be simply pastime and pleasure
at AUSTIN q CRISIS.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
agricultural.
COMMERCIAL vs.. HOMEMADE MAN
URES.

One reason why farmers are so Of
ten urged to compost or make at home
all the manure possible, is that home
made manure can be used with less
discretion, and it carries with it the
chief ingredient of all rich land,
to wit: humous or vegetable matter,
without which most of the commercial,
or concentrated fertilizers, cannot be
proftably used. Land becomes poor
in exact ratio to the exhaustion of its
humous or vegetable deposit, and
destitute ofthis, no amount of concen-
trated fertilizers will permanently i'm
prove it. The chief original element
of fertility must be restored. 1t is
this which makes other fertilizing
elements available. Farmers have
often complained after using for sew
ralyears concentrated fertilizers that
their lands were burnt out" mean
ing that the guano had burnt out,
destroyed or used up all the strength
of the land, which indeed, consisted
in its humous. Lime and other min
erals might still remain to it, but
these were only latent fires without
fuel Adding to them concentrated
manures without sufficient humous
for them to work upon, might, indeed,
produce better crop than the land
would produce without them, but
the insufficiency would reveal itselfin
firing the crop at an early stage, or in
the sudden reaction and collapse of
productive strength after the produc-
ton of two or three crops. 1t is nee
essary, therefore, for the farmer to
examine into and understand the ex-
act condition of his land in regard to
fertility before he can venture safely
to apply concentrated manures, and
we apprehend that disregard of this
important point has occasioned much
of the dissatisfaction with really good
commercial fertilizers. Used upon
lands worn out, or exhausted of their
humous, of course they made no ade-
quate return for the outlay, and not
only discouraged the farmer but in
jured the sales of the manufactur-
ers.
But compost, of homemade man
ure, is not liable to any of these acct
dents or conditions. In fact, it is the
cure-all to the whole of them, not
only restoring the exhausted humous,
but also supplying all the other ele-
ments and quantity, not likely to be
used enormously or to excess. Eve
ry farmer, therefore, should not only
make it the basis of his work, but en-
deavor to use it in combination with
all the concentrated fertilizers when
ever the magnitude of his operations
requires their introduction
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
POND FOR CARP.

A carp pond must have a muddy
bottom, and be supplied with aquatic
plants, as water-lillies, sedges, water
crosses, etc, upon which the fish feed.
Carp are vegetable feeders, and can
not livein a pond, unless it is either
naturally supplied with such food, or
is planted. A spring running into
the pond would be an advantage.
An acre OF water, six to eight feet
deep in the centre, if well supplied
with suitable foods plants, would sup
port more than Il thousand fish, but
as carp increase very fast, the stock
would have to be reduced very often
after the pond was once stocked. A
pond that can be drawn off by gate,
Is desirable for taking out the fish,
and when the dam is built, a gate
should be made in it for this pm-
pose.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09

The idea that fortunes are to be
made in Florida without sweat of the
brow is the fiction of land specula-
tors. An orange grove in Florida is
not worth cent more than an apple
orchard in the north until its owner
has put into it years of hard work,
much money aud much impatient
waiting. 1t can be demonstrated
that good apple orchard pays lar
ger interest than the best orange
grove in Florida.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
II. NJ. HAMMETT, Ordinary.
GEoRGIA-CoBB COUNTY.

Whereas, 7. c. MCCARTHY, Administers
tor of Archibald MCCARTHY represents to the
Court in his petition, duly filed and enter.
ed on record that he has fully administered
Archibald Megarity's estate This is there's
fore to cite all persons concerned, kindred
and creditors, to show cause, if any they
can, why said Administrator should not be
discharged from his administration. and re
ceive letters of dismission on the first Mon
day in October 1885.
II. NJ. HAMMETT, Ordinary.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09

There is largely increased de-
mand for the gum of the eucalyptus
tree on account of its effect in remov-
ing scales in steam boilers and in
preventing rust and "pitting." Elk
tensive Eucalyptus forest are to be
planted in California with the object
of supplying the demand.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
Executors Jno. L Dodgen, decd
GEoRGIA-CoBB COUNTY

Whereas r II. Earle, Administrator OF
A. NJ. Wallace represents to the Court in
his petition, duly filed and entered on re-
cord. that he has fully administered A. NJ.
Wallace's estate. This is therefore to cite
all persons concerned, kindred and credits
ors, TO show cause, if any they can, why
said Administrator should not be discharg.
ed from his administration and receive let.
tiers of dismission on the first Monday in
October 1881
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
NOTICE.

Four weeks after date application will be
made to the court of Ordinary Of Cobb
county for leave 10 sell the real estate of A +.
G. Mcintosh late Of said county. deceased,
for the benefit Of the heirs and creditors OF
said deceased. This July lst, 1885
AURILLA MCINTOSH, Adm'x.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
NOTICE.

Four weeks after date application will be
made to the court of Ordinary of Cobb
county for leave TO sell the real estate of
Samuel Robertson, late of said county de>
ceased for the purpose Of distribution
amongst the heirs Of said deceased This
July lst 1885.
w. c. ROBERTSON, Executor.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
NOTICE TO DEBTORS & CREDITORS

NOTICE TO DEBTORS & CREDITORS.
GEoRGIA, COBB COUNTY.
All persons having demands against the
Estate of John L. Dodgen, late of Cobb
County deceased, are hereby notified to
render in their demands to the undersigned
according to law, and persons indebted to
said estate are required to make immediate
payment This LIST day of June, 1885
T b. DODGEN
w. A. DODGEN,
Executors Jno. l. Dodgen decd
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
NJ A R TT A.
Opposite the Kennesaw House.)
J. A. G. ANDERSON, Proprietor.

j. a. Q. ANDEhoUN, Pr0prletOr.
rEEHE BEST OF VEHICLES, THE
safest of drivers and the fastest OF
horses are always ready, night and day for
hire. No man or woman or child ever has
given me call in the past who has been,
nor shall any ever in the future be, dissatis
fled with my teams or the men in my EN-
ploy. Everything and every body about
me are No. /.
have cheapened my charges proportion
ate to the stringency of tie times For
references as to the truth of what | say, as
to the turneouts and charges, 60 to my
friends, which means the public generally.
Parties hiring are strictly responsible for
the safety OF themselves. vehicles and
horses. j. A G. ANDERSON.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
TUFTS HAIR DYE,
HEADACHE
and all BILIOUS COMPLAINTS are relieved by taking
WRIGHTS INDIAN VEGETABLE PILLS
Purely Vegetable; No Crying Price CSC. All oFuggil
A NEW PROPOSITION.

CIR UP CLuBs-The Marietta journal
will be sent in clubs Of TEN for one dollar
each, cash in advance As an inducement
we will give an extra copy of the paper to the
person getting up the club Single copies
of the paper positively not less than 81 80
This places your county paper within the
reach of all, and there can be no excuse tor
not taking it.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1885-07-09
WHERE TO GET JOB PRINTING.

Attention, is directed to the jobbing de-
partment ofthe MARIETTA Journal which is
provided with the most approved and ex-
tensye facilities for the execution of job
printing of all kinds, from the smallest label
to the largest poster in black or colored
inks at prices as low as can be had else
where for an equal grade of work We are
prepared to print at short notice pamphlets
posters, programmes, circulars, letter heads,
checks, envelopes bill heads, blanks of all
kinds, catalogues business cards, and every
thing in the line of printing used in the con
duet of every day business
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
BUSINESS LOG.4LS.

Ladies turbins at Poling's.
For gents underwear call at Poling's.
H. 5. Polling has a fine lot Of honey.
For farm loans call on VIM Bissen. If
Goto Poling's for honey-pure honey.
Books, albums and fancy goods at
II. c. Spaulding's
Gebhart's groceries are fresh, and his
stock complete.
Two quarts of cranberries at John
Gebhart's for 25c-
% yards Of good prints for s1.OO at
John Gebhart's.
6 ID. note paper 10 cents per quire at
h. c. SPaulding's.
Chains, charms, lockets, bracelets,
&c. &c. at H C. Spaulding's.
For renewal of Gilbert & Gay loans,
call on VIM. Bissen. If
H. c, Spaulding's is headquarters
for fine jewelry.
For lowest rates on farm loans apply
at the Office Of G. A. Spaulding. s5d
Try the eek Postmaster five cent
cigar, found only at H. c. Spaulding's.
All kinds of Land business win be
promptly attended to at this Office.
For toilet articles of every descrip-
ton, 60 to G.. W, Whites drug store,
Kirwin Kansas.
You will find a splendid line Of dress
fannels at John Gebhart's. Ladies call
and see them.
H. s. Polling & Co. keep a nice line
of excellent clothing which they are
selling at bottom prices.
Gebhart keeps the best brands of
tobacco and cigars. Go where you can
find the best.
The place TO get pure drugs, fresh
paints, and oils is at Whites drug stOres
KirWin Kansas.
The bottom completely knocked out
of rates on farm loans by Smith Jones
& Co, Register Of Deeds Office.
H. s. Polling & Co. is headquarters
for mems, boys and childrens caps of
all styles and at prices to suit the buyer.
Have you tried those genuine havana
cigars at Whites, in KirwiRP If not you
are losing some of the sweets Of life.
While not always the policy to mort
gage your farms. still if you must, let
G. z. SpauldiDg accommodate you, s58
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
THE DIFFERENCE N FAIRNEss.

A reader of both papers cannot help
but notice the difference in fairness be
tween the Kirwin Chief, and the hide
pendent. Both papers published the
first article In the AtcbisOn Champion
in regard TO the lease Of the Central
Branch railroad and the probable
abandonment of the Kansas Western
The Champion found it was mistaken
in regard to the abandonment Of its pro-
ject and Immediately corrected the mis-
take, adding at the close Of its article
the following.
'Iti Is seldom that a newspaper speaks
by the card in railroad affairs, but In
this instance we think the Champion
knows whereof itspeakss and if the peO-
pie Of Jewell, Smith and Philips want
more railroad facilities they had better
take hold of the Missouri Pacific prOpO-
sitiOnss for we are satisfied they mean
business
The Kirwin Chief, with a spirit of
fairness. copies the second article of the
Champion and goes on to say the fol-
lowing truthful words:
"A tremendous eHOrG IS Delng made
to carry the railroad bonds in Smith
county, in favor of the Kansas Western
line from Hiawatha, west through Smith
Center and PhilEpsburg- If there is a
certainty of the road being built, it will
be good Investment, but the people
should see that no bonds are delivered
until the whistle of the locomotive is
heard IN the counties through which it
runs-D
During all this time the Independent
is as silent as the grave about the cor
rectiOn in the Champion and is fighting
ike Turk to defeat the Smith county
bonds. Our people are beginning to
learn which Kirwin paper to patrOnize.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
BIG GEEK Kittens

Farmers are busy preparing for whit
er.
We had q splendid rain last Saturday
night and all day Sabbath.
Mr. L. p. johnson is sick.
Mrs. Alma Colby and Miss Nina Col
by was visiting Mrs. B. Smith the 22nd.
Mr.. F. Drennen is building a new
house.
Mr. r. Gambia has bought a farm and
is so well pleased with Kansas his moth
er has come to live with him. She
came from Kentucky and says corn was
90 cts. per bushel.
James johnson says he is going to
pail his garden next spring Go nus
bands and do like wise.
Grandpa johnson has a very bad cold
hardly able to go about.
Another prairie fire has come and
gone and as usual done a great deal of
damage. Mr.. Figley had his stable,
straw, and hay burned. L. P. and
James Johnson's pasture vas burned
over and a fine growth Of young timber
destroyed Mr.. Douglass pasture was
burned oyer and we have not heard of
any more damage done in this township.
PENCLING.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31

We are now prepared to make farm
loans on terms as favorable as can be
had anywhere in this county. We are
now doing business for a company that
is noted throughout the west for prompt
ness and fair dealing. We have just
been given new, and we believe better
rates than has ever been offered IN this
part of the country. See US before you
make your application and we are well
satisfied that we can please you.
THE CITIZENS BANK.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
10 TIE PIIRIIc

c. H, Lefingweu has just received a
large and complete stock Of mems, boys
and youths winter clothing, and will
guarantee as low prices as any house in
the west. In suits he has all sizes de-
sired, and his line of over coats can not
be beat. Go and examine his stock and
see If the inducements offered will not
Justify you In rigging yourself up in q
bran new suit-OvercOat and all.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
LAND OFFICE AT KELVIN, Kansas,


Notice is hereby given that the foloHtn g-naIned
saffier bss led NOTICE Of her intention to make
fral proof in support Of her claim and that sad
proof VIII be made before Register or Receiver az
EZirgsiH, kansas, on Dec. 9TH, 1881 VIZ
MARTHA E OLIVER
formerly Martha z So oFthens widow OF moses
Worrhen Hd 1925, for the = sW s sec l4 -
nv-4 80 90 u b. n IT She names the following
illnesses 10 prove her continuous residence Ap9l
and cultivation OF said land VIZ; FRED " l5ore-l
Charles Morrison J. b. Elllngnos- ana Games
Martin. all OF Crow, Kansas
JoHN BIssELLs Register.
Don Carlos g Son, Atty. oct-1
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
APPIESIAPPLESI

ED. HERALD.-PIease state through
the HERALD that viii have a car load
of apples in Marvin about Nov. 9Th,
and shall offer them at very low rates
in any quantity, To merchants who
wish a number Of barrels I shall give
special rates. All apples not sold from
the car viii be stored in my cellar at
Marvin, for sale, Yours,
wv A. TROUP. JRs
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31
NOTICE.
MARVIN, KAs. Oct. 23rd, 1885

MARVIN, KAs. Oct. 23rd, 1885.
I hereby give notice that my wife
Anna Hess, and myself have this day
divided our property and that we have
seperated and do not live together as
husband and wife and that viii not be
responsible for any debts that she may
contract after this date.
o-3I-3w. j. G. HESS.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31

A gentleman from Solomon township
called at our Office this week, and stat
ed that Lamb had kindly sent him =
democratic-anti-go-hOp ticket. But he
said he should not waste the precious
thing by voting it. but should keep ii as
a relic 10 show his children's children
tn extreme exegeneies of a case which
compelled such m unholy alliance.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31

1t is not to be wondered at, if that
true and tried democrat, Mr.. John
Mercer, of Deer. Creek township, and
his friends, should feel chagrined and
disguised at the turn which affairs took
yin the mongrel convention. When a
few self constituted leaders assume to
itwirl the democratic party between their
thumbs and fingers, and trade off one
of the most lucrative offices in the couu-
ity to the greenbackers, the Office of
county treasurer, and for which it was
quite generally understood that Mr..
Mercer would be a candidate, and all
for the sake of getting support for Billy
BickfOrd for county clerk, man who
has never taken any special interest in
the democratic organization of this
county, and man whose political pro-
clivities are. to say the least, very un-
stenable. is enough to rankle the. good
nature of a saint. MIR. Mercer has been
one of the principal factors in holding
the democracy of this county together
when days were dark, and this is his re-
ward. Shades of Thomas jefferson,
what gratitude is here exhibited.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1885-10-31

Boss Lamb, with the cheek ola gov
eminent mule, sends out his manifesto
to the voters of Phillips County in the
form of a circular, in which he assumes
the position of the great moral dicta-
tor. and very patronizingly informs
the voters how they must cast their
llOS lots next Tuesday.
Among other rich things he says
1--WE hope you will consider
whether it viii not be to your interest
to join US in advancing the cause of
the farmers of Phillips county as
against all interests which seek to
acquire wealth without earning it or
rendering a fair equivalent"
Join ''lts in advancing the cause of
the farmers of Phillips county" How
the boss gloats over the word ''tss"!
He rolls it like a sweet morsel over his
tongue, while he fingers his volumin-
Gus tax. titles with demOniac grin.
And this is the way the boss ''lSs ad-
vRnces the cause of the farmers against
all interests which seek to acquire
wealth without earning it." This
man who takes his little tOO per cent
a month out of the farmers, is the
sweet scented hypoerite who delights
in calling himself "Us', and who has
the cheek to dictate to the farmers
how to vote.