The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1885-03-10
FLEA BITES.

The only female switehmsn in the
world lives In Macon, Georgia, and her
name is Mrs. Mary Csrroll-Exchapse
No matter. there are tens of thousands
OF female switchboys in the country.
"A bill has been introduced 10 the Ma
sschusetts legislature providing that msles
ana femslss shall only be admitted into
skating Kinks at different hours.-Ex.
Should the bill pass and other states fol
low Massachusetts example there wouldn't
be roller skate in the country in two
years.
Black walnut dresses are very fashion
able for young ladies.-E1
This is u sJlemn sort of a joke; but
black walnut dresses are Just as iasbioua-
bic for old ladies.
Fsstidious ladies' in high life now wesr
gold wire shoe lsces--Exchanee.
This is a progressive country in some re-
spec,s, but the contrast between the ladies
who wear golden shoe laces and men with
their breaches fastened to their suspenders
with nail is the least bit inharmoDfous.
"A correspondents asks us WHY il is
more natural for women to cry than men.
Exchange.
The onlv reason We eau see is that wom-
en- peal all the onions.
What caused the cushion of Mulva-
hills piano stool to catch fire Yesterday
morning ?-Kansas City Times.
One of Kansas Gty's famous dsnamiters
had probably been sitting on it.
The scissors grinder has struck the
city Hannibal Courier.
The unusual btillisncy of the Courier Is
nov accounted fDr.
One half the world doesn't know hsw
the other hall lives.-Exchsnge.
We don't suppose the other half carss
durn about what the one half knows.
-1,044822 pigs were reorived in 81.
Louis during the year lSS4.-Exchange.
1t does not say that those pigs have sll
grown into hogs but-but it is likely there
are two or tbsee at least stepping about the
Future great"
"A correspondent asks: "Plesse advise
me what q bald head deno&es.-Exchsnge.
We do not know what IA denotes exactly
but suppose it has some reference,to the
front row Of an "Adamless Edea" enter
tainment.
A Jsderson City nan, who vas cap,
tured by Italian brigaDds a year ago, has
returned to this country minus an ear
Exchange.
1t has been ascertaiaed that the brigsp Is
sawed of his ear for hammock.
Missouri hiss S6s,O56 rsilch COWS,
which are estimated to De worth SlS,I7,-
5l2.-Exchsnge.
Missouri has several Thousand calves, as
well, but they b~long, exclusively, to the
ladies', and money couldn't buy 'em.
1t is said Jefferson City man has
turned out some sort Of an electrical fnven-
| ton by which q man can lie in bed and
6sh.-Exchsnse.
The story seems highly improbable, be-
cause a Jefferson City nam can lie any
where, he is too lazy TO invent anything.
and he never heard Of anything electrical,
and the only fish" he is acquainted with
are frogs.
The convicts In the state prison con-
slider themselves, one and all, states men.
-Ex.
But Jefferson City wants to be indemni-
fed for their loss every ii one of the con-
victs dies or is psrdoned.
TO be good lawyer a man must have
sufficient regard for the truth to use il
with discretion.
He had better use it with the view Of
getting big fee.
From the worst stages of Heart Dis.
ease l CO slider myself cured by The use of
Dr Gravesf Heart ReOnistor M