Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-08-05
WANTED A DRESS SuIT,
A Humorous Story from the German.

ny JoveI that miserable tailor il
enough to drive a man crazy" criei
Judge Henry Winkler desperately, mo-
knowing whether to curse or laugh
He paced the room as he spoke, like {
Gagged animal. Poor fellow. His anger
was not unreasonable as he strode ur
and down the limited space, his hail
dressed and perfumed, and attired ir
shining patent leather boots, liner
fsultlessly laundried-but there oul
description must cease, and we must
not further dilate on the bridegroom's
apparel Yes. Henry Winkler was tc
be married at IL o'clock, sharp, to his
adored Aurelia, in one of the mos,
fashionable churches. The tailor had
promised him to deliver his dress suit
at his apartments at 10 o'clock, and
now it was quite II 80, and Mr.. Wink.
lar stood arrayed in spotless white and
there were no signs Or swaI1uw-tati
anywhere!
"Do you know what l would do ?"
ventured on officious groomsman, who
had come to escort the Judge to church.
Il would just put on my morning coat
and start at once. l do believe that
this will be the very best thing you can
do just now"
Bring me hatful of last years hail,
but pray do not mention my morning
coat, nor put in plea for my trous-
ers," cried Winkler, laughing wildly.
"One can see the sunshine through my
coat; and leaving out such trifes a.
style and cut, my trousers, which were
black ten years ago, are now of such q
hue as to be totally indescribable.
Man is always q laughable object when
he is getting married, even at his best
but il array myself as you suggest ]
am half afraid that Aurelia would say
No instead of Yes when we meet at
the altar"
But what is to lie done?" urged the
groomsman. "What can you do? 1t
is getting late. Did you not say that
the tailor said 10 o'clock? See, il. is
II: 80" cried Charley Held, nervou1ly.
He certainly said 10 o'clock" the
Judge answered, solemnly.
"Well, suppose we send for your
dress suit?' said Charley.
What are you dreaming of?" re-
turned the Judge. 1T would take
more than an hour for any messenger
to get from here to the tailor-shop"
"You are right" sighed Charley.
"But tell me what was your reason for
ordering your wedding clothes so late ?
They should have been here a week ago.
Why were you so foolish?'
II was foolish to trust to that beast
Of tailor. I always put off things un-
til the very last moment, and now I am
to be punished, l suppose" and Henry
Winkler threw himself into an arm
chair.
Look at my new dress suit" said
Charley Held, smoothing his coat down
in front of long dressing glass.
Doesn't it fit me we'll? Oh, l was
smarter than you. Judge, for my dress
suit was ordered in good time and sent
home week ago. / had it made ex.
pressly to wait on you. One may trust
the apothecary, the bootmaker, and the
devil occasionally, but never--no, nev-
er-trust your tailor"
"Your lecture may be very amusing,
groaned the Judge, "but it fails to keep
me ont of this muddle."
Suddenly the Judge bounded up
from the armchair. grasped the aston
ished Charley by the shoulders, and
looked at him fixedly, while he cried !:
"But you can help me if you will, old
fellow. sec that you can be Of the
greatest assistance to me in this, the
most threatening moment Of my exist
ence."
"I," answered the surprised friend.
"What on earth can / do to help you
now? / cannot see my way"
"But you will see your way. Look
in the glass, my dear boy. See how we
stand-as much alike in figure as two
peas"
"Well, what of that ?" asked Charley,
as the Judge devoured his figure with
his large brown eyes.
"Don't you see, my dearest friend,
how you can help me? Why you must
lend me your dress suit SO that ! can
hurry and get married" the Judge said,
impetuously.
What could Mr.. Held do2 He gave
one long despairing glance at his tall.
fine figure in the glass, and thought Of
the charming Bertha whom he, as best
man, was to escort to the altar. Alas !!
he had contemplated this pleasure for
weeks. and now he was to be undressed
like naughty boy in the middle of the
day! He was angry with himself that
he had strutted before the glass and
called the Judges attention to his dress
suit, but some one had to suffer, evil
IDENTIFY, and so Charley resigned his
new clothes to his enraptured friend.
1t took Judge Winkler but . moment
to slip into the dress suit, and soon he
had arrived ct the church, escorted by
the faithful Charley, who had donned
the perforated morning coat and the
despised trousers. Winkler was the
happiest Of men, and Charley one Of
the saddest a. he walked up the aisle
with the lovely Bertha on his arm. at
whom be dared mot look, for fear she
would break of her engagement with
him. An hour later the newly-married
pair went in the cars steaming away to
Hreenwald, where they were to pass
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