davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
GRANTS MUSTERED OUT.

Halfmast the flag, a heart brave and stout
Surrenders at last-Grant's mustered out.
Toll the bell slowly, moisten his sod,
Peace to his ashes, glory to God.
Battle and trial shall never again
Harrow the hero in sunshine and rain;
He's gone to q land devoid of all doubt
All his service is over-Grant's mustered out.
His fame like light shall shine through the years,
HaIlowed by memory and watered by tears;
Flags that he carried shall long flap and fiout-
His record of glory we can't muster out.
Donelson, Shiloh, the Wilderness too
N1lestones immortal with deeds of the Blue;
And this is the man who never knew rout,
Till Fate told the world that Grants mItered out.
Nations unborn shall visit his tomb,
Reared by the people and lasting as DOOM
A mecca where manhood may kneel without doubt,
Where Truth everlasting is not mustered outl
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
ouR KNEE.

The bladed knife which we now offer
as premium for club of five prepaid sub
scribers, is in every respect most service
able tool. 1t is large, strong and keen, and
the blade of temper not to be surpassed
anywhere. Send for samples to aid you in
getting up club, and procure one of these
excellent knives
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
the burden of the strife, and we may be sure
that he will SO amend the practices in the
Bureau as to secure them justice.
NAMES OF}pOsT-OFFIcEs.

Z
-------TT-s---T--------
NAMES OF lPOST-OFFICES.
As soon as Postmaster General Villas
wearies little in his hunt after offensive
partisans," we hope he will turn his atten-
ton to one really needed reform. This is
to put stop to the stupid duplication of
names Of post-ofices. Few things are so
tiresome and annoying, and withal SO sense
less, as the way people go on naming new
towns Rome" "Vienna," "Mt. Vernon"
Springfield" "Newark," etc. Every State
has town with one of these hackneyed
names. The mistakes made in consequence
are numberless, and frequently costly. I'm
deferred by the experience ofthe past, we are
still going ahead in the same old rut. Look
ing over the list of new post-offices for the
first half Of this year we find that Alabama
has established Buckhorn, although there
are already Offices of that name in Colorado,
Georgia, Illinois, Louisiana, North Carolina,
Pennsylvania, Texas, and Virginia. She has
Dixie, though there are seven others in
the South, to confuse letter-writers and mail
ing clerks. Arkansas has Wyandotte, 80
as to be even with California, Kansas, Michi-
gan, and Ohio. There are already 10 Bu-
chanans in the "Postal Guide" but Dakota
had to have another. Indiana thought that
IA Antiochs-to say nothing Of East, West,
North and South Antiochs-were not enough
for the country, SO she had one Of her own
established in Jefferson County. Iowans
showed their poverty of invention by nam
ing their new offices Bennett, Berry, Cumber-
land, Holbrook, Holmes, Little Rock, Oak
wood, Plato, Waltham and Yorktown, all of
which are duplicates, many times over fire.
quently, of towns in other States. Kansas had
to call some of her new offices Alton, Carson,
Carthage, Englewood, Fountain, Goshen,
Greensburg, Johnstown, Lakeside, Oregon,
Petersburg, Whitman, ETC., just as if more
distinctive names were not as available as
these tiresomely- familiar ones. The Post
master-G General should call a halt in this
practice by refusing to accept any new Office
with name already on the list.
There is no sense in this duplication.
There are plenty of names in literature, his
tory and science that are not hackneyed.
Should this List become exhausted, it is not
difficult toinvent new and euphonious names.
Let people who want an entirely original
name do as the Chief Engineer of the Illinois
Central Railroad did when he was establish
ing the route of that road. He had lying on
his desk cards with letter of the alphabet
printed on each. When he wanted new
name he would take three or four of these
and change them back and forth, until he
got cognomen that suited his musical ear.
Thus, out of 7, L, N, he got Tolono. From
G, r, N, Onarga, etc. Among the best names
constructed on this principle are: Aledo,
Conlogue, Derinda, Neoga, Diona, Farina,
Loogootee, Manteno, Nation, Minonk, Mi
nooka Mokena, Nokoma, Nunda and Olena.
Let us have a surcease from the WEAKNESS of
interminable repetition of tiresome old
names.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
JOHN PALMER, Secreta
A Thoughtful Matron.

Mrs. L. ]. Little, of Livingston, Sumter
County, Alabama writes that she has used ST.
Jacobs Oil in her family for healing bruises and
curing rheumatism, and such has been the
relief afforded by it that she always keeps a
supply on hand for accidents either in her
house or the neighborhood.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30

THE number of pension certificates issued
and signed during the week ending July 25,
1885, was as follows: Original, $50; in
crease, 591; reissue. 50; restoration, 40
duplicate, ID; accrued, Is; act of March 3,
1885, 80. Total, 1875.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30

THE number of pension certificates issued
and signed during the week ending July 18,
1885, was as follows: Original, 1876 increase,
555; reissue, "a; restoration, II duplicate,
20; accrued, "a; total, 1,495.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
THE NATIONAL TRIBUNE.
WASHINGTON. D. G., JULY 30, 1885.

To amy person who will send us
a club of ten new subscribers to
THE TRIBUNE we will present
a new O.. A. IL. watch, inclOSed
i'm a handsome satin-lined case,
and warranted to keep accurate
time.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
GEN. CARLIN,s MEsIoIRs.

In the next issue of THE NATIONAL TRIB-
uNE will appear the last instalment of the
brilliant and interesting Memoirs from the
pen of Gen. Carlin, which we are confident
will be deeply regretted by our readers.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30

was most dead with heart difficulty
Can now do good days work, and sincerely
recommend DIR. GRAVES HEART REGULA-
TOR as the rcmedy.-Geo. Gladding, Harris
grove. o. $1.00 per bottle at your drugstore.
Free pamphlet Of F. E. ingalls,, Cambridge,
Mass
The National tribune., 1885-07-30
General sherman on The Tribune.

General Sherman The Tribune.
HEADQUARTERS ARMY OF THE u. s.,
WASHINGTON, d. G..
To the Editor NATIONAL TRIBUNE
= X
From the nature of the articles published
in the numbers of THE NATIONAL TRIBUNE
eentm observe that it is published in the
interest of the soldiers of the civil war In
this you have my hearty sympathy, and [
will endeavor in my own sphere of action to
cooperate with you in all practicable meas
ures TO that end, without money and with
ont price. With great respect,
Your obedient servant
w. T. SHERMAN.
The National tribune., 1885-07-30

THE BURIAL PLACE OF GEN. GRANT.
Except to the relatively few people of
New York city, probably no place in the
country could have been selected for the
interment of Gen. Grant which would have
met with as little favor as the place chosen.
The protest against Central Park has been
universal and earnest. 1t is felt to have no
sort of fitness whatever. In the first place
Gen. Grants relations with New York were
not at all close, and they are associated
with the least creditable and most hui
initiating part of his history. If he were
going to be buried in any State, either Ohio
or Illinois should have been selected. Ohio,
where he was born and where he was sent to
West Point; or Illinois, which was his home
at the outbreak of the war, and which gave
him his first commission, and the people of
which aided him with their support and
sympathy at the outset of his career.
But the place of all others that should
have been chosen for the ashes of our great
est hero is Washington-the Capital of the
Nation; the city associated with most of the
eventful portions of his life, and where his
grave would have been the object of many
pilgrimages. To bury Gen. Grant in Wash
ington would have instituted here what
would have hoop obi r., Uyas{x,;n,+ar A bbov
"a sacred spot for the interment of those
whose history was part of the Nations, and
those whose deeds the Nation delighted to
honor An interment in Westminster Alb
hey has for centuries been the highest aspi-
ration of Englishmen, and it has encouraged
her eminent ,pen quite as much as any other
honor or act of appreciation that could be
bestowed upon them.
One proposition, that did not receive the
attention that it should, was to bury Grant
at Mount Vernon. Then that lovely spot,
already hallowed by containing the ashes of
the Father of his Country, would have be-
come the Mecca of the Nation.
At the Soldiers Home where it was also
suggested he be buried, is splendid monu-
ment to Gen. Scott. The knoll, upon which
this stands and where it was suggested to lay
Gen. Grant, overlooks the city of Warrington
and gives magnificent view of the Poto-
mac. There is there an abundance of room
The National tribune., 1885-07-30

We should like to hear from any of our
readers who know Of any of these cork-oaks
growing in their neighborhood, and will be
glad to print whatever they may have to say
in regard to the character of the tree, the soil
and other conditions best fitted for its
growth.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

Bermuda is supposed by some geologists
to be slowly sinking at the present time,
but an investigation by Prof. VIM. N.
Rice shows that no subsistence has taken
place since 1609-the time of the celebrat-
ed shipwreck there of Sir George Somers,
which event Shakespeare is supposed to
have had in mind when he wrote 1.-THE
Tempest"
A popularity in workers in German sill
yer spoons is the color of the hair, which
in time becomes dyed pale green that re-
quires years to change. The particles of
metal-which is chiefly copper-also pro-
duce disease similar to consumption.
Disease germs are probably much less
affected by extreme cold than might be
expected. Experiments have been report
ed to the Glasgow Philosophical Society IN
which a temperature of 100 degrees below
zero was insufficient to stop process of pu-
trefaction.
Ten years ago, according to Sir Freder
lex Abel, the loss of petroleum spirit from
leakage and evaporation was as much as
eighteen per cent; but 1t has now been re-
duced to eight per cent in many store
houses, and in Germany the leakage is said
to be less than one per cent.
A portable electric lamp, carrying cleo
tricity to last twelve hours, has been pro-
duced.
CURIOUS EXPULSION OF A PARASITE
The so-called "horse-hair snake" is known
to be parasite of the cricket. 1t be-
comes active only under water, and re-
cent interesting statement by DR.. H. G.
McCOok makes it appear that the crickets
themselves are aware of this popularity
and seek to take advantage of it. A lady
was troubled by frequently finding the
hair-snakes in her water-pails, and watch
ed to learn how they came there. She soon
saw a large cricket mount upon the edge
of one OF the pals, bring the tip Of the
abdomen just beneath the water, and, with
a few violent throes, expel black mass,
which resolved itself into one of the
worms. The cricket seemed much ex-
hausted by the operation.
A PLANT-TRAvELER. plant allied to
the s-of-the-valley, the ConoalIaria
poLuqonatum, is q remarkable traveller.
Every year knot forms upon its root, and
these knots drag the plant about an inch
annually from its original position; SO that
in period of twenty years the plant will
have travelled about twenty inches from its
lrSt location.
Color AND FLAVOR OF PLANTs.-Mr.
Emmett S. Golf believes there may be a
law of relation between color and flavor in
fruits and vegetables. A knowledge of
such a law would be Of advantage to agri-
eulturists in the selection OF the best plants
for continued cultivation. Thus far Mr..
Golf seems to have shown that a light-col
ored flesh denotes milder and more deli
cate flavor than exists in darker colored
specimens of the same varieties.
One of DR.. Livingstone's early achieve
ments was the discovery Of Lake Ngami,
in South Africa, which was then favorite
resort of elephants and ether large ami
mails A recent explorer of the same re-
gion reports the lake dried up, leaving an
arid spot devoid Of both game and vegeta-
ton.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13
A Remarkable Case.

Mrs. Henry Ellis, 500 Scott street,
Milwaukee, Wisconsin, writes: CDR. S.
B. HARTMAN & Co. COLUMBUS, o.: am
induced by a sense of duty to the suffering
to make brief statement of your remark
able cure of myself. l was most niser-
able sufferer from the various annoying
and distressing diseases of delicate persons,
which caus ed me to be confined to my
bed for long time, being too weak 10
even bear my weight upon my feet. I
was treated by the most reputable physi-
clans in our city, each and all saving they
could do nothing for me. l had given up
all hopes ofever being we'll. In this con-
dition l began to take your MANALIN
and PERUNA, and am most happy to
say in three months was perfectly well
entirely cured, without any appliances
or support Of any kind"
Mr.. G. 4. Proehl, New Portage, Sum
nit County, Ohio. writes: sly wife
has been sick for about five years. In the
first place the doctor called it leucorrhea,
and treated it about one year, and she
grew worse, and turned to liberation of
the womb, and was treated for that two
years, but she grew worse and the doctor
gave her up. Then l employed Dir. In
derwood, one OF the best doctors of Akron.
but under his treatment she grew worse.
She wa; paralyzed; she had lost all of the
sense of feeling and her eyesigEt. She
could not walk for nearly two years.
About six months ago Underwood gave
her up. She tried y our PERUNA. She
has taken three bottles, and it did more
good than any ether medicine. The pa
ralysis has about left her; her eyesight is
getting better. We will continue tie use
of PERUNA until she is we'll"
Mr.. Isaac Nicodemus, Schellsburg, Fed
ford County, Pa, writes: 81 am induced,
by a sense of duty to the suffering. to make
abrief statement Of your remarkable help,
as sufferer of o.ttarrh in my head and
throat. / doctortd with one of TIE best
physicians in our place for that dreaded
disease, catarrh, and found no relief. Bat
in 1883 lost my speech, and was not able
to do any kind of work for near three
months. l could neither eat nor sleep.
PERUNA and MANALIN did wonders for
me. used three bottles Of PERuNA and
one of MANALIN, and now am in bet
ter health than I have been for ten years,
and can heartily recommend your med
icine to all suffering from that dread dis
ease, catarrh."
Mr.. I. w. Wood, Mt Sterling, Ohio,
says: "Your medicine gives good salts
faction. My customers speak highly OF
its curative properties"
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13
A tienl OF Gratory.

At a social panty given to the members
of the tecch aid bar, at Jackson, Tenn,
during session the Supreme Court, Col
Landonn c. Haynes uttered the following
gem of oratory. During the evening Gen
N. B. Forrest arose and said
Gentlemen,-I propose the health of the
eloquent gentleman from East Tennessee
a country sometimes called the "God-for-
saken."
Col. Haynes responded:-
chr. Chairman and Gentlemen plead
guilty to the 'sof impeachment I was
born in East Tennessee, on the banks Of
the Watauga, which, in the Indian vernac
ular, means beautiful river, and beautiful
river it is. | have stood upon its banks in
my childhood and looked down through its
CLASSY waters and have seen a heaveb be-
low, and then looked up and beheld heav-
On above retiacting1 like two mirrors, each
Ill tue other, is moons aud planets and
trembling stars. Away from its banks of
rock and cliff, emlock and LAUREL, pine and
cedar, stretches a vale back to the distant
mountains as beautiful and exquisite as
any in Italy OF Switzerland. There stand
the great Uuaka, the great Roam, the great
Black, and the great Smoky Mountains,
among the loftiest in America, on whose
SUBMITS the clouds gather Of their own ac-
cold even ON the brightest day.
There | have seen the great spirit of
the storm, after noontiie, go and take his
evening nap in his pavilion of darkness and
of clouds. | have then seen him aroused
at midnight as giant refreshed by SUM
Der, and cover the heavens with gloom and
darkness have seen him awake the tenn
pest, let loose the red lightnings that ran
along the mountain tops for thousand
miles, swifter than an eagles flight in heav
en- Then | have seen them stand I'D and
dance keangels of lightin the clouds. TO the
music Of that grand organ of nature, whose
keys seemed to have have touched by the
fingers of the Divinity in the hall of eterni-
ty, that responed in notes of thundei..5l at rc-
sounded through the univelse. Then have
seen the darkness DRIFT away beyond the
horizon and the morn get up from her SAT-
from bed like queen, put on her robes of
light, come forth from her palace in the
sun, and stand tiptoe on the misty noun
tain top, and while night fled from before
her glorious face to his bed. chamber at the
pole, she lighted the green vale and beauti-
1ui river, where was born and played in
childhood, with smile of sunshine.
20! beautiful land of mountains, with
thy sun-palnted cliffs, Row can I ever for
get thee?"
Gen. Forrest stood stupefied while Col.
Haynes pronounced these marvellous SEN
tences and said he would not have been
more amazed if he had been struck bv the
lightDing's flash from the summit of
Smoky Mountain.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13
This is the fly time with me-, said the
thief as lie eluded the clutch of an officer.
Not a Single Gray Hair.

you may laugh and think me vain
thing" writes Mrs. J. r. c., of San Fran
cisco, TO a friend in this city, ''but have
not gray hair in my heat and vet (sad to
say | am fifty ard day Recently my
hair Was pot only qulte gay bat quite trim,
too. Parkor's Hair Balsam made in New
York, I think-did wonders for NE. Try
it if you have occasion. It really does
what say, and restore the color also. y
Not d. e, not greasy highly perfumed
Only reliable soc assipg.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13
WHAT is A GENTLEMAN?

What is a gentleman? Is it thing
Decked with scarfpin, q chain. and ring?
Dressed in q suit of immaculate style,
Sporting an eye-glass, a lisp, and smile?
Talking of races, Of concerts and balls,
Evening assemblies, and afternoon calls?
Summing himself at "home'' and bazars.
Whistling mazurkas and smoking cigars?
What is a gentleman? Say, is it one
Roasting of conquests and deeds he has done :?
One who uublushingly glories to speak
Things which should call up blush on his
cheek?
One who, while railing at actions unjust,
Robs some young heart of its pureness ana
trust,
Scorns to steal money. or jewels. or wealth;
Thinks it not wrong to take honor by stealth
What is a gentleman? Is it not one,
Knowing instinctively what he should shun.
Speaking no word which could injure or pain.
Spreading scandal, deepening no stain?
One who knows how 10 put each at his ease,
Striving successfully always to please?
One who can tell by glance at your cheek,
When to be silent and when he should speak
What is a gentleman Is 1t not one
Honestly eating the bread he has won,
Walking in uprightness. fearing his God,
Leaving no stain upon the path he has trod.
Caring not whether his coat may be old,
Prizing sincerity far above gold,
Rocking not whether bis hand may be hard.
Stretching it boldly to grasp its reward?
What is gentleman? Say, is it birth
Makes man noble or adds to Lis worth.
Is there family tree to be had
Shady enough to conceal what is bad?
Seek out the man who has 'ErGth for his guide
Nothing to trembIe at. nothing TO hide;
Be he noble. or be he in trade.
This gentleman Nature has made.
The meadows wake
And smile and smile;
The SIMS rays break
Grim Winters vile.
The thrushes swing
And sweety sing,
So free from guile.
Our breasts expand
When robins come;
We seek the land,
And rove and roam.
How sweet the pleasures
That Springtime measures
With fairy wand
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

'FThe way to sleep" says scientist, sis
to think of nothing" but this is a mistake.
The way to sleep is to think it is time to
get up.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

Lord Chesterfield remarked that even
Adam, the first man, knew the value of
politeness, and allowed Eve to have the
first bite Of the apple.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

Some one who has been there remarks
that a young author lives in an attic be-
cause one is rarely able to live on his first
story.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

A German farmer disputed his tax bill.
He said: 81 pays the State tax, the county
tax and the school tax; but by tam I pays
no total and never had any,"
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

81 know many distinguished persons"
says facetious business man; ''nearly
all nay debtors are men of NOTE
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

An exchange says clergymen would make
good brakemen On our railroads because
they have done a good deal of coupling.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

An Irishman drinks whisky; Frenchman
wine; an Englishman ale; Dntchman
beer; an American anything he can get.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

A girl has been arrested while disguised
as an old woman. The old woman dis
guised as a girl is still at large.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13
A TERRIBLE INFANT.

A TERRIBLE INFANT.
recollect nurse called Ann,
Who carried me about the grass,
And one fine day fine young ma n
Came up and kissed the pretty lass.
She did not make the least objection.
Thinks L, aha!
When / can talk I'll tell mamma"
And that's my earliest recollection.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

An Arkansas editor says that the stingi-
est man in his town talks through his nosa
to save the wear and tear on his false
teeth.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

Mrs Pratt says in poem that the only
happy woman is dead woman. Don't
see how that can be-dead women can't
talk
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

ono, sir" said Fogg, 81 never knew
Brown to mislead or deceive anybody in
his life. No, sir; fact is, he couldn't.
Nobody would believe anything he said"
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

They were expecting the minis er to din
ner SIS everything all ready, my dear ?"
asked the head of the house. eyes, ne can
come now as soon as he likes s'Have
you busted the family Bible ?' Goodness
gracious! | forgot that. "-Neag York San.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

A clergyman asked some children: ''Why
do we say in the Lords Prayer, who art
in Heaven since God is everywhere" A
little drummer boy answered, Because it's
headquarters.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

mo said a young man who was asked
to sing, 81 have not attempted to sing for
many years. My voice got away from me
when | was very young, aud when | caught
it it squealed so that it frightened me, and
let it go again"
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1885-05-13

the world Free of Cost Read it care
fully, study it well and you will CLEAN in
formation that may prove more valuable
than all the wealth of the Rothschilds-
more precious than all the gems of Eu-
ropes royalty. II may scre yoltr life!
BaADFiELD EEYR So, Boz IS, Atlanta, Ga.