The Democrat. (Scotland Neck, Halifax Co., N.C.) 1884-1896, 1885-07-30
THE OLD, OLD STORY.
Had Heard 1t Before.

I think that one reason there are
so few good story-tellers among US
is that the listeners are, in many
instances, SO wilfully and so stub
bornly unappreciative that it tends
toward discouraging the skillful mar
ration of first t.class anecdotes.
There were four of US together
coming across "the divide a few
years ago. and this principle was
then and there elucidated. Gibbon,
Gregg and myself we're congenial
acquaintances, and we would have
enjoyed the long ride if it had not
been for a man named Sausage, who
had only recently escaped from
some low.priced educational insti-
tuition. He had acquired few cast
iron facts of cyclopedia variety and
with the ardor of the valedictory all
through his clothes he was making
tour of the coast and Colorado
He was what you may call one of
those really statistical, brainy young
reservoirs of information who burst
forth from the Alma Mater with the
intention of going to Congress in
two years, and finally compromise
the matter forth years later by run.
ming for overseer of highways and
getting showed under by about 1877
majority,
When Gibbon saw Mr.. Savage get
on the stage he said to me in a low
voice "Nye, we are undone. Saws
sage will doubtless endeavor to
relate some anecdote to us on the
way, and then 1 shall commit an
atrocious crime 1...'..5t
But he didn't do so the first ten
miles he contented himself by
shedding other information, and
explaining things that he had just
found in his physical geography,
and stunning us with the hard words
that always float around IN the aqua
rum which young men refer to as
their brains. -
i Finally however, some one re-
minded him Of story. Gregg tried
to turn the conversation, but it was
of no use. Said he "It seems that
many years ago traveller or tourist
of some description, whose name is
immateria1 -''
Funny name," said Gregs
s'Dont you think so, Gibbon?'' ...
Yes. g Foreigner, probably. ]
knew man named Jimmy Terria
once though
We discussed the name for four OF
five miles, and then allowed Sausage
| to proceed. a
"Well, as was going to say. this
, tourist, traveller, or sojourner was
propou nding inquiries to the climatic
changes and isothermal' s
"Now. PARDON said Gibbon, "bu
are you sure that word is not pro
nounced isothernal?'
I ventured to remark that is>other
7 NAL was the correct accent, while
, Gregg sided with Sausage. From
quiet discussion this grew into
regular row, which lasted at leas
/, ten miles. Then we allowed th
q narrative to proceed.
\ "Weli, atlast, to make long stor.
r short, the traveller and a native o
i this country"
. Remember his name?'' aske'
:! Gregg. We've got the other man
: name. We ought to have this one.
+ mo" says Sausage. 81 didn'
|. give the tourists name, you remem.
ber.'
Il beg pardon" said Gregg. g
K don't want to seem querulous an
all the time kicking up row wit
!. a comparative stranger, but you Ger
o tainly gave US the other gentleman
r name."
Il We then had a long and highl
a enjoyable quarrel during which Gi
8 bon and l challenged Gregg AM
d Sausage to fight US in dark room
e each man to be blind folded an
u armed with an adze. Best man t
n pay all funeral expenses and scru
If out the room next day,
II To this Gregg agreed, but Sawsag
n said he wasn't a very expert adzemal
It and wanted to apologize.
IL Gibbon and hesitated. FINAL
f.. we agreed to think it over, but i
!. the meantime we begged Sawsag
y to go ahead with his story, as W
would reach the home station in fiv
minutes more.
5. At last he made ont to tell TIL
story that Adam found under the Gu
! rant bushes when he went into tt
- Garden of Eden, about the plae
IS where the year was divided int
ID "nine months winter and thre
"a months late into the fall.
20 At the station Sausage went Q
. east by the train, and we took No
~ - for Salt Lake City. On the wa
: Gregg, Gibbon and sent a telegra
=, to Mr.. Sausage separately, whie
read as follows-to>wit:
"E. Ptolemy Sausage, care Cor
ductor No. 4: Have heard that
r, c. story Of yours before. 9 Collect