Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-05-26
BRIGHT BITS.

"DON'T you love the little birdies?" entreats
the poetess. Yes indeed we do, but we want
the toast well browned.-B0stOn Post.
CAMELs sometimes live to be 100 years old.
This Is unquestionably because they drink so
seldom. We give this as pointer 10 the tenn
perance reiormers.-LOJceU citizen.
a CORRESPONDENT suggests that the letters
sc. O. p. which have 20 long been on duty
To- the Grand Old Party" may now be un-
derstood to mean "Gitout Offensive Partisan"
THE summer has come. Do not keep little
children penned up indoors. fearing fresh air
will give them Gods or the sunshine spoil
their compilations. Turn the rascals out
CinciRndtj commercial Gazette.
THERE is a fortune for a man who viii in
vent vet water for use in theatre oceans.
The dust kicsed up by he water used in The
World" invariably makes the actors on the
raft cough.-Nelo Orleans Pjcay7tne.
JUDGE-"You say you are not a vagrant?"
Prsoner-"NO, your Honor" Judge-"Dld
any motive bring you to this city," Prisoner
Yes, your Honor. JudSe-'M hat:"
ys.'-Bost6n Post.
For the benefit of Gladstone st. SHIPMENTS
Regielo prints a bitter parody on the psalm
of Life" the tone of which is sufficiently in
dlcated by is opening stanza:
Lives OF grand old men remind MS
We may clOthe ourselves with slime
And, departing. leave behind us
Dirt marks on the scroll OF time"
FATHER, please tell me what entails means,
and If we have such law IN the United
States Father-"Under the law Of entails
my boy, the landed property of the father is
handed down to the eldest son. excessively,
generation after generation. We have no
such provision in the United States. Here the
money generally goes to the lawyers who SET
tie the fathers estate. You see the diner
enceE'-E@chaa0es
A MINISTER well known by name thr0ug bout
the land, who has one Of the best equipped
houses of worship, was showing friend, not
long since, through it's various rooms when
they came to the Kitchen, which was connected
by a speaking tube with the pastors study.
ON the y all was printed IN large letters, The
Lord will provide" while in smaller letters
on the same wall near the mOuthplece Of the
tube was the direction: "BloW and wait FIR
an answer" The visitor naturally asked if
the two inscriptions mad any particular con-
nection with one another; and it is hardly
necessary to say that a change was soon made
in the lettering .-ROchester Posi- Egpress.
Cor. OCHILTREE came into the House the
| morning after the close of one of the races all
! "bruke up" His har was standing on end,
| his dress was disordered, a general air of
! seedness prrvaded his heiug-in short, he
/ seemed completely demorallZed. whats
/ the matter. Tom?' exclaimed a dozen sym
/ pathizIug friends. "Matter?" blurted out the
! Texan, who imagined every body must have
! heard OF his misfortune. "Matter Why,
have lost $4,000 twice the pay Of member
of THIS lIOuse-on the races yesterday. Mat
| ter, great Scott" ITS too bad. Tom. but
then" YES and the worst of it is" addeC
Col. OchitPee, savagely, $50 OF it was in
! cash. "-ChicdgO Trl6une.
A FEW Sundays ago q minister preached
sermon on the evils of mendaclty, to a con
gregatiOn in the backwoods near Nipantuck
In the course Of his remarks he alluded to tn,
tragic death of Anauias. Al the close OF tn,
sermon an old deacon took the minister aside
and informed the reverend gentleman that h,
had made a mistake in regard to AnanIas.
"HOW SOP" asked the asLOnisheu divine.
"Why, by telling the congregation tina
Ananias is dead" said the deacon.
Ill don't understand" said the ministe
in some confusion. "Please explain"
"Dang it," said the deacon. 'nearly ever
man in the congregation is an Office seeker
and when they learn that Ananias is dead tn
whole burned crowd viii want to MI hi
place. "-OAristidn At Work.