The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1885-06-25
A G BOOK,
scintiIlating with Sarcasm and Brilliar
With Truth.

gcintiIlating With Sarcasm and Brilliant
With Truth.
New York Correspondence American Rural
Home.1
Chap 'Has Malaria;" goes to Flor
Chap. II. "Overworked;" goes to Eu.
Chap. Ill. "Has Rheumatism" goes to
Ems.
Chap. ". Has a row with his Doctor!
The above chapters, Mr.. Editor, I find in
a book recently published by an anony-
nous author. I have read a deal of sar-
casm in my day, but / never read any
thing equal to the sarcasm herein con-
tanned. I suspect the experience portrayed
is a personal one; in short, the author in
Inmates as much on page 81. Let me give
you a synopsis:
which superficial physicians cover up a
multitude ofill feelings which they do not
understand, and do not much care to inves-
tigate. 1t is also a cover for such diseases
their patient to travel or that he has
overworked and needs rest and is
probably suffering from malaria, it is a
confession of ignorance or OF inability.
The patient goes abroad. The change is a
tonic and for a time he feels better. Comes
aches, severe colds. cramps, sleeplessness,
irritability, tired feelings, and general un-
fitness for business are succeeded in due
time by alarming attacks Of rheumatism
which fit about his body regardless OF all
human feeling.
1t is muscular,-in his back. Articular,
he fears it viii fly to his hearth Now of
he goes to the springs. The doctor sends
him there, of course, to get well; at the
die on his handsl
That would hurt his businessl
Better for a few days. Returns. After
q while neuralgia transfxes him. He
can not walk; can not sleep On his left
side; is f~retful; very nervous n irrita-
BILE; is pale and flabby; has frequent chills
and fevers; everything about him seems
to go wrong; becomes suspicious; musters
up strength and demands to know what is
killing himi
"Great heaven!" he cries, "why have
you kept me SO long in i~gnorance?"
because" said the doctor, ST read your
fate five years ago., l thought best to keep
He dismisses the doctor, but too late
His fortune has all gone to fees.
But him, what becomes of him?
The other day a well-known Wall street
banker said to me cit is really astonishing
how general bright's disease is becoming.
Two Of my personal friends are now dying
of it. But it is not incurable I am certain,
for my nephew wa recently cured when
his physicians said recovery was -impossi.
derfui one.o This gentleman formerly
represented his government in a foreign
country. He knows, appreciates and de.
clares the value of that preparation, be-
cause his nephew, who is a son Of Danish
Vice,Consul Schmidt, was pronounced in
durable when the remedy, Warmers saft
cure, was begun. eyes," said his father
81 was very skeptical, but since takinl
that remedy the boy is well:o
I regret to note that ex-President Ar.
thur is said to be a victim Of this terribl,
disease. He ought to live, but the proba'
bilities are that since authorized remedie,
can not cure him, his physicians will no
advise him to say his life, as 80 many
thousands have done, by the use of War
at Drexel, Morgan & Co.'s, told me he re
garded ssas a wonderful remedy"
Well, I suspect the hero Of the bool
cured himself by the same means. The in
ternal evidence points very strongly Il
this conclusion.
1 can not close my notice of his bool
better than by quoting his advice to hi
''If, my friend, you have such an expe
, rience as I nav portrayed, do not pu
your trust in physicians to the exclusion
of other remedial agencies. They hav
know that many of them are SO very con
, scientious' that they would far prefer tina
i their patients should go to Heaven direc
from their powerless hands than that the,
$ should be saved to earth by the use Of An
unauthorized means.
And that the authors condemnation i
! too true, how many thousands duped, an,
yet rescued, as he was, can personally tes
tify?
\ -"MAGG1E, Idon't like to see this dust O
the furniture" Gail right, mum. Iil shu
tho blinds riUhf aUau v-Norrjefo7Sn HAx