davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
hillary LITHIAsIs. JAUNDICE, DYs-
PERSIA, &c.

Bll4lAhl A4AAA1AaEAAog
PEPSIA, &c.
CASE or Mrs. HELEN C,
OF Fauuuler county, Va, stated by DIR. IL.
NJ. Clarkson. of that county, Member OF
Medical Society Of Virginia.
mrs. C, now thirty-fOur years OF age,
has been subject from girlhOod TO OCCASION
al attacks of I0undice, associated with DVS-
pepsid. Latterly these inVasions have be-
come much more frequent and aggravated.
In the autumn Of 1872 she came under my
care. and theHceforth, for nearly tnree
years, saw her on an average TWO or lilree
lines a month in paroxysms OF excruci-
otiug main with nausea. frequent vomiting,
and iaundiced skin Of the deepest hue.
These occasional attacks would last from
tygenty-f four to seventy hours, leaving the
Daficnt i'm the intervals. de bilitated and un-
able 10 take any but the lightest and most
carefully selected diet. Whilst oplates,
etherizatiOn. &C., would mitigate the PAIN
fulness OF these poroxysms, u seemed lil-
poSsible TO eradicate the dlatheslS causing
Them. / became AT last convinced that the
morbinc cause was the occasional passing OF
BiIiaqv CdicuH. My patient, however be-
came almost hopeless, and Tor conSluer-
able time abandoned all treatment. Being
summoned TO her in an unusually severe
attack, in April OF the present year pre-
vailed upon her TO use the ButialO lltnlA
Water. under the influence OF whlcn her
DuSpeptc symptoms were in snort ulne
entirely relieved, and though SIX months
nave ELAPSED since she used the water there
has been no return Of the distressing symp-
toms described, and she is very ueci1euly
improved in general health. To-day saw
her setting out on a pleasure trip looking
better Than have ever seen her, and appa-
rcntly. to use her own trite though trulh-
ful expression "a new woman. cheet-
mllv give an the credit 10 the truly won
deriul water OF Buffalo Lithia Spring No.
-
FOr sale by
PURCELL LADD & CO.,
tars au l9-W&F8w
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

the Winston Reinforced Linen-Bosom
Shirts at 81 cents, and those Pepperell
Jean Drawers at A. cents, and those
stylish Silk Scarfs at % cents, all Of
which are at 90l Main street.
L. B. SPENCE 4 SoN,
Merchant Tailors.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
GRAZING.

HORSES AND MULES CANUN
III be accommodated with FINETH
GRAZING by the week or month at BELL
AIRFARM, Heurico county, opposite Me-
chanicsville tolI-gate: Apply Tor partlcu-
lars 10 SIEfhES MEhCh,
au 2O.2ts Resident.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

The steamer Gem, in its endearor to
please its patrons, ha, added new at
fractions to its excursions in the shape
Of music and dancing at the Bluff on its
Saturday and Monday trips from P.
VI. Fare round trip, 25 cents.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

W. Ii. LYME a CO.. trustees sale OF shaft
ing, betting, sash, blind, aud door-ma-
chlnery, st 1888 east Franklin street.
Att o'clock A. NJ.
r. b. COOK. 10 A. NJ. nice household fur
niture. &C.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

The telegraphlc reports of all games
received at Manning's are not furnished
him gratis. lie pays for them for the
information of his customers, and he
should be we'll patronized by all who
20 to his place to learn the result Of the
games. The National-Yirginia games
by innings.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
The city Primary.

The City Democratic Committee,
Colonel John b. Cary chairman, will
meet on Tuesday night next to make
arrangements for primary election to
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
DEHrfEIx.
Ge FOR A SET or TEETH. sS

Ge FOB A SET or TEETH. -
QO They are b>0sftf,l. d,~dtis, cI33f0
and hfSffks, and warranted 10 be ~ good as
any made eisew here. Can give ~ references
500 persons who are now wearing tseth
thatl made. TEETH EXTRACTED with
out pain or putting tie patient 70 s'eep for
b0e. All nIiing from 81 up Old sets re-
modelled. Satisfaction guaranteed.
DR. \. CALVIN JOHNSTON,
Dentist
$40 ufa Main STREET. about one square east
Of koIrOe Park. al ie-I3t'
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
Miss Didier, Baltimore, black six,
Irish points. and pearl

Miss Didier, BaItim0re, UIaOs
cream-colored Irish points, and peari
ornaments.
Mrs. Dickinson, Richmond, BLACK
silk and Spanish lace; diamonds.
Mrs. II. j. >Vose, New Orleans,
cream-colored satin and brocade, en-
frdiae, lace handsome diamonds,
blush and white roses.
Mrs. Sutton, Surry county, Va,
handsome black silk, with black lace
trimmings diamond ornaments.
Many others too numerous to men,
ton. BLUE RIDGE.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
OATH HIGH SCHOOL,
ID AILLB0Ro' SPRINGS. VA.
JOHN c. HOWARD, PRINcIPAL.

Session begins sEPTBMBER rs. 1885.
TERMS: From Si4o TO $3.50 per session for
board and tuition.
The boarding department VIII be under
the charge OF 4. q. Peyton. lessee OF Mil
bof0 Springs.
For reference and general information.
address
an iG-rodtm THE PRINCIPAL.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

Last game today until September
l4th.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

Old newspapers for sale at the Dis
patch cOuRting-room at Is cents per
hundred.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
SMOKE TRIxY OfaARs.
aAoxs TE1xY CaeARs.

The D1srArcH JoB-PnIETrSG HOUSE Is
thoroughly equipped to do all kinds OF Book.
AND Jos-PxIsTISG st the shortest notice.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
Do~'t Overlook

They are going to beat the Virginias
to-day-so they say.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

beautiful RIeursies 10 Washington.
Don't forget the excursion to Wash
ington by steamer Ariel next Monday,
oath instant.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
hillary CALCULl.
CASE OF MRS. -,
ANNNM
ginia.


nance county, n. c., recently OF Vlr-
ginia.
"Mrs. - was, for number OF years, sub
iect TO frequent attacks OF Bihdry Cdtcnt,
at Others for a much longer period. The
paroxysms OF pain were OF unusual sever,
ty, and attended by violent nausea ana
Vomiting. These frequent attacks greatly
Impaired the general health, ana more es-
pecially the nervous system. In tne nope
of fpding relief she made several visits 70
the most celebrated mineral springs oi Nlr,
ginia and Of North Carolina; and on % seveFa! raj
occasions visited the northern cities lot
medical treatment. All, however proved
unayailing, and these attacks continued
making their steady inroad upon her az
ready much-enfeebled constitution, until
two summers ago when she was sent 10 the
buffalo Lithia Springs Of Virginia. where
she remained SIX weeks, using the water
with the happiest possible results. Her uls-
ease was arrested, there is every reason 70
believe permanently. as she mas since s,i han q. !.
no return of II, and is wonderfully built ny
in general health
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

Earned runs-Virgnias. 3 Westmlnsters.
l. Two base hits-Nash, /; Higgins, l;
Miller, J. Three-base hiis-Housenoider' :
Greenwood, 1. me-runs-Greenwood l.
eff on hases-N irglnias. o ; WcstminsieIr.
4. Struck out-On Pyle 4; on Greenwood.
2: on Schweitzer. 3. Bases on balls-Ou
pyle. 2: of schwetZer. l. Bases on balks-
on Greenwood /. Passed balis-CantZ. {;
Corcoran 3. Wild pitches -Schwc!;zer.
Time Of game, hour and So minutes. Um-
piTe Pau Latouche.
These clubs play again this afternoon,
when it is likely the visitors will catch
on to Pyle, and make the contest more
interesting.
Driscoll Gill occupy the box to-day
for the Westminsters. lie defeated
both the Nationals and Baltimores.
lie is considered one of the best in the
country. See him for the last game.
4 CORRECTION.
The report of the baseball game
played Wednesday evening between the
Tobacco-W Worms" " and the Wea-
vels " resulted in a victory for the lat
to-, and not for the "Tobacco-WOrms, -
"a stated in the body Of the report.
J published score by innings was
r. rect
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
LCNBER.DxAxERs.


w b. DRBw & SON, 81
W. MANUFACTURERS OF
GENTLEAKN'S FINE BOOTS AxDs -
SHOES
In the latest fsstiionab bio styles. FitgaarAn-
tsed. and warranted not 70 squsak, nisnsg
oO hand at cost.
Repairing neatly and promptly done.
500 Main street, corner Eighth.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
CT. MARY'S SCHOOL,
RALEIGH, n. &.

The forty-nnh annual session OF this
school will begin SEPTEMBER 10, 1885.
For catalogue address the rector,
REV. BENNETT SMEDES, A. b.
G.1 m
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
rus,c a.a Dancing NJ Dreury's Bluff.

Westminsters will be on their mettle
to-day.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

Attention is called to the advertise
ment Of the handsome residence Of Mr..
II. L. Staples on our fourth page.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

Driscoll, the Westminster's great
pitcher, who defeated the Nationals and
Baltimore,, will pitch to-day.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
JACOB MAY 4 SON CAN.1

ACUb MAI . Sun CANQ1SD
~ now be found at No. sls Broad A
They VIII remain there and seli BOlJfE.
SHOES. slIrPERS. aud TRUNKS Al =
sserinee prier To moving baek 70 their Ina.
= Goods win be sold regardless of valss.
Remember. this is only q short, tempor>rv
sale. JACOB NAY a HON.
AZ So-c, ol9 tast Broad slneet.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
DICHMOND SEMINARY,
IL DO. 8 EAST GRACE STREET,
RICHMOND, VA.
JOHN II. POWELL. Principal;
Mrs. 4. G., PEYTON. Associate Principal.

JOHN II. pOWELL, PrlncIpaI;
Mrs. 4. G., pEYTON. Associate PTine pal.
Tho thirteenth session OF this BOARD
ING AND DAY.SCHOOL FOR YOUNG
LADIES Will begin SEPTEMBER Il, 1855,
and close June 10. 1856
Thoroughly convinced OF the great ad-
vantage OF such instruction we have an
nexed KlNDERGAKIkN DEPAkf-
MENr for inle G0Us and girls between the
ages OF four and eight years. This Will be
under the management OF Miss VIRGINIA
X. SNYDER, q lady well known in this city as
an accomplished and successful teacher IN
this her specially. Comfortable rooms arc
proyided upon the same floor with the rest
of the school. DIT With0m any contact or
connection tctfh IL.
Apply for catalogue at the bookstores or
fnplihpr IrlnClp2l. Nv lN-Su, ,WN 3u
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21

HANOVER ACADEMY, VA.
Ii TAYLORSvILLE ST-oFFICE.
COLONEL HILARY p. JONES, NJ. A,
PRINCIPAL.
Session begins SEPTEMBER soTH. and
ends June 2bth.
Catalogues sent on application.
Jy 29-eodtoci
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
SIEDS. de.
sCHUYLEa ELECTRIC LIGHT.

THE SCHUYLER ELECTRIC
Il LIGHT COMPANY has obtained the
sole right for furnishing city and private
lights for and during the period OF nVe (o)
years. ,. I'll,
As the installation contemplated will
have a capacity OF but 100 arc and 1000
incapdescent pTiyste lights. many OF which
are already engaged, PARTIES DESl Rl NJ
LIGHTS ARB REQU UESIED TO AAhE
IMMEDIATE APPLICATION.
Price per month per light arc......"..sl2 w
Price per month per light. inoandes- 70
"
NO CONTRACTS TAKBN FOR LESS
THAN ONE YEAR.
H. NJ. LTNNELL,
aulb.2w care Council Chamber, city.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
Baseball News.

Pyle against Driscoll. See who is
who,
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
Personal.

DR.. r. S. Vest has returned to the
citv
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
pUrFALo LIrHuA wATER,
DUFFALo LITHTA WATER
FOR
puIaRY CALCULI OR GUILE STONES.

AcAsE RELIEVED BY THIS WATER
AFTER A FAILURE OF THE
MOST cELEB RATED WATERS OF
VIRGINIA AND CAROLINA AND THS
REST MEDICAL TREATMENT
HADIN
THE NORTHERN CITIES.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-08-21
Ar<GrOS SAILS TO-DAY.

sxoKs TRIxY CIeAKs.
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
FOR THE LADIES.

DR. Scudbery, of the United States Navy. has
had a dreadful quarrel with his beautiful and ac-
complshed young wife ut San francisco. because
in his absence abroad she studied medicine, be-
came q homeopathist and undertook to cure the
community OF its ills and her own husband bad
temper by sugar-coated pills. On his return from
a cruise the Doctor found his graduated wife in a
homeopathic dispensary attending patient. The
Doctor said: 80 the pellet-peddling ignoramuses
have roped you in. have they?" She replied
Don't be rude. my DEAR" and proceeded to ad-
quack /" roared the husband. You're butcherI' "
screamed his wife. And the little pellets divided
them Observation-Disclosures Times.
A doctors wife in Glasgow prescribed for a
patient during her husbands absence. Her medi-
cine produced salvation. and the patient sued for
$50 damages. The plaintiff sought TO show that
the wife q responsible agent of the husband.
The defendant denied that his wife had authority
privilege, and the plaintiff took the medicine at
her own risk. The Judge cOincded in this view,
and found plaintiff liable in costs.
- The following is given by the Pail Mall Gazette
as the ages cf the wel'-known women named. The
figures were obtained from a careful study of the
dates contained in a recently published English
biographical dictionary: Nine. Adam. 10; Mary
Anderson 20; Sarah Rernhardt, Al; Mrs. Resant,
don Cumming. AZ; Lady Eastiake. 50, Empress
Eu,enie, 50; Emily Faithful. so; Mrs. Gladstone.
10: Julin Ward Howe, 60; Mime. de Novikof IS
Jenny Lind. 81; Pauline Lucca. IS; Helen Mod
jeska Al; Florence Nightingale. 65; Christine Nils
son. AZ; Mrs. Oliphant, e.; Ouida. 45; Adelina
Patti AZ; Christina Rosetti, 50: Ellen Terry. 81
Mrs. Weldon. 4s, and Mrs Henry Wood, 65.
Dorothy Deue Is the name OF a new London
beauty who promises to become a rival of Mary
Anderson and Mrs Langtry. She is said to be very
beautiful though still quite young.
- Miss Kate Gleason. of Rochester, N Y, Il
studying practical mechanics at Cornell. She is
the only lady IN that department..
BernhArd.s chief ambition will never be real
lied. She wants to grow fat and write good poetry
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
PERSONS AND THINGS.

"A clock company at Thomaston, Conn, after
making up $4,000 worth of stock. began putting
the movements together only to discover that ali
of them turned their hands or pointers backwards.
and were, therefore, worthless.
Rev DIR. T. Dewitt Talmage carries $4,000 OF
insurance On his life; Lawrence Barrett carries
$4,000, and Edwin Booth Zoo.
Ordinance Sergeant Charles Lange, now on duty
at San Francisco, has been in the u. 9. Army in
known OH the pay roll as Aud Lang Syne.
One of the parties announced as a juryman in
a pending trial in San Francisco defined his senti-
ments OH homicide by saying that =" his feeling in
general was that IS not right for one man to shoot
another"
- The number of persons killed by wild beasts
and poisonous snakes in India in 1888 was q, 905
against y, rs in 1882 20057 deaths due to the
b ties of poisonous animals, 9So persons were de-
voured by tigers, PSI by wolves and 2l7 by leopards.
The loss Of cattle amounted to AZ AIS animals, an
increase Of III over the preceding year. While
most of the deaths of human beings was due to the
bite Of snakes. only GA cattle were thus poisoned
More than three-quarfers of the deaths took place
in Bengal and in the provinces of the Northwest;
$3.50 dangerous animals were killed during the
=" Sam" Jones' the kentucky evangelist was
originally q lawyer, and on his conversion joined
the Methodist Church.
Mrs. Gladstone is kept pretty busy following
her husband about and counterrnanding the pre-
posterous purchases he makes-in hun
dred hats, in another the whole contents of a toy
shop, etc The story Is now current that his going
to see screaming farce at a London theater the
very evening the news of the fall OF khartoum was
received was the work of his friends and family
who cons, raned him to go there lest broodng over
the terrible news should unsettle his mind.
The fruit dealers of Arkansas observed last
Thursday as Strawberry Day." giving the fruit
gathered on that day to the inmates of various
eeemosynary institutions. Chi dren picked the
berries. the owners gave them merchants paid for
the crates and the railroads handled them free.
"A clergyman of st. Louis says that the aggre-
gate church attendance in that city on Sunday Is
10000 while on II recent Sunday 40 900 people wit
messed cowboy exhibition. 2D,0O0 attended base
ball games, 2O.000 spent the day in beer gardens,
and 5000 heard g Bob" Ingersoli.
The latest evasion of the iowa Prohibitory law
Is q drink called hopnc," and a saloonkeeper has
been prosecuted for selling it; but jury decided
that it was violation of law. though "hopine >
is said to resemble beer closely that an expert
cannot tell the difference"
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
Contributed.
The Experimenting Servant Girl.
IGermdptog ron Herald


1t is surprising to how many different uses 8
simple laundry article may be put if directed
by Yankee wit. When we began housekeeping
We had as our first hOusemain a German girl,
who was an A cook, laundress and chamber
maid. She introduced some excellent dishes
and soups and brought Pearline into the laun-
dry and dust-covers into the chambers. Of
course she had to get married, and in her place
came bright American girl, to whom l I'M
parted information of Barbara's ways and arts.
Abbie was no raw hand, but she soon developed
q big bump of destructiveness and revolution
Spelling Barbara's cakes with too many eggs
putting lard On the gridiron, and making gravy
for soup, were her failings. Soft soap she pre-
ferred to any laundry compound, and the dust
tras dust in the sleeping rooms. She only stop
ped a month, but i'll that time she fitted us out
with dyspepsia, yellow linen, and untidy rooms
Her successors nanHe was Madelaide, and she
was Yankee too She was green enough, and
awkward enough but she was willing to learn,
and again l introduced Barbaras recipes and
ideas, aud told her to go ahead. As for dust, she
never permitted any to be seen in her dOmin-
ions. As for her cookery. she came in ahead Of
Barbara and was just equal to any Miss Parloa
of the time. As to her washing,-there she ex-
celled. She was "gon' ter see" +" what Pearline
would do, and aside from actual bleaching every
week she accomplished some surprising things.
That article, now in such common use in the
laundry. she made effcctually effective in ways
that no housewife ever dreamed of. She would
wash the furniture with it; put it in water and
sprinkle carpets before sweeping; mix the solu-
tion and shampoo the dog; dampen cloth with
it and rub up the book-covers always had it in
her dish-water; washed the blinds and wood
work with it; in short, used it almost every
where throughout the house TO promote cieanli-
ness. The traditional Mollys broom WAS no.
where. and my husband is wont to say, "Give
us an experimenting Yankee girl and plenty
of Pearline, and Well stand no chance for
chOlera!" WIN.
Mem .Lerseu
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
Exnensiys Funerals.

= A funeral in st. Panl's Cathedral is not only
a rare event. but it is also an exceedingly costly
honor. The fees paid by the Corporation of
London for burying the late Lord Mayor in the
Cathedral were about $4,000. When royal
funeral takes place at Windsor. the prelimi-
nary fee to the Dean and Chapter {" for break
ing the ground" is $4,000. This item is the
more unreasonable inasmuch as the royal vault
is not under st. Georges Chapel and no ground
is broken. the only disturbance being the tenn
porary removal of certain slab on the floor of
the choir in order that the coffin may be low
cred into the vault beneath, where it is
wheeled along passage to the royal tomb
house. underneath the Albert Memorial Chapel
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
Don't Blame the Mothers.

IRtchm0nd (Fd) Religious Hcrdid.I
He ruined himself fully and forever by the
way he rebukcd a mother for her ehild,s cry
ing" said a country pastor, in telling Of the
complete failure of q prominent minister who
had come to help him in protracted meeting
One ought never to show the least worry, even
though q dozen babies may be crying. If the
preacher is calm and serene and shows that he
is not worried, he can hold the attention of the
congregation; but to turn upon the poor, dis
tressed mother with savage thrust is crime
which country people will be slow to forgive
In the present state of affairs in the country,
mothers must often take their children with
them OF remain at home
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
La IL Not Singular

that consumptives should be the least appre-
hensive of their own condition. while all their
friends are urging and beseeching them to be
more careful about exposure and OVERRIDING. 1t
may well be considered one Of the most alarm
ing symptoms of the disease, where the patient
danger. Reader, if you are in this condition.
do not neglect the only means of recovery.
Avoid exposure and fatigue. be regular in your
habits. and use faithfully of DIR. Pierce's
"Golden Medical Discovery" 1t has saved
thousands who were steadily failing.
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
Meteorological Item.
lTeras Sihings.1

It was in the smoking room of an Atlantic
steamer that worthy Yeuton was talking
about weather forecasts
Look here" he said, az tell you vat it is.
You peter dond take no stock in dem vetter
predictions. Dose boobies dond know noding.
Dey can't tell no peter as / can"
But my dear sir" said person near by.
they fsretold the storm which We nave just
encountered"
well, dat ish so" said the Teuton, "but
tell vat it is. Dat storm would haf come yust
de same if il had not been predicted"
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
Uses OF a Doctor.
[Burliayt0n (W.) Free Press. !

A rich Georgia landowner sent for neighbor
and proposed that if he would support him
while alive, furnish him medical attendance,
and bury him decently he would make him a
deed to his land. The trade was closed. the
papers drawn, and a doctor at once sent for.
The result was that the fortunate neighbor of
the rich man was in possession of his estate
within week. Doctors are indispensable in
some emerpeuces
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
Puts on Airs,
Inicnuo ieli1,nr l

"But tell you he's good man."
Il don't care if he is sha'n't vote for him."
."Why?"
"He tries to put on airs"
''ln what way?"
"Why, b'gosh. he wears two suspenders an
carries his terhacker in a BOX, an he nevur
thought o. chuckin' his pants into his boots till
he wanted the nomination.
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
A Tobacco Problem.
Db Inul

Mrs. Minks: "Thcre it is again. Tobacco,
always tobacco. What will you do when you
get to heaven, where there are no spittoons ?"
Mr.. Minks: Perhaps there will be some
there"
Mrs. Minks: "Indeed there won't. The
idea! What will you do then, Mr.. Minks l.?
Just answer that"
Mr.. Minks: II really don't know, my dear,
unless we can get seats near the edge"
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
lie Knew How TO Swim.
ITerds SiGings,l

leIdS oDttngs.l
A gentleman Of our acquaintance tells US the
following good story. which goes to show that
the average Austin boy has what Mrs. Parting
ton would call a "judicious" mind. He-the
boy wanted TO 20 in swimming.
But, my son" rejoined the anxious parent,
swimming is unhealthy. 1t was only this
morning that you were complaining of pain
in your stomach"
That's so, pa; but know how to swim on
my back"
The National tribune., 1885-06-11
A Serious Matter.
Tas-. @.

II hcerd yer ole mudder was dead" said
Sam Johnsing to Gabe Snodgrass, colored
citizen of Austin.
Jess So She died las week"
"Was she sick lOng?"
No; she jess tux sick one day an died de
mex"
Only sick one day! de Lor', why dat was
hardly wuif while"
Huh, if you had ter pay de Doctors bill
yon would change yer mind" responded Gabe.