The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1885-07-10
THE BOTTLES STORY.
WHY 1t Preferred Honest, Sour Vinegar t,
King Alcohol.

cOmIOrJaDle SAID Tom Barndby.
Tom Barnaby was not a member of any
Temperance society whatever, and had no
dislike to the taste of liquor. Not that he was
drinking man. Oh dear. no. Never was
drunk in his life; never even slightly over.
come by liquor. But still-well, still a nice
glass of something comfortable stuck Tom in
pleasant light and he generally took it
when it did.
Tonight it was cold and chilly and gloomy,
and the wind ratified the shutters and crooned
down the chimney, and made banshee of
itself along the street: and Tom who was not
very fond of reading, could not lose himself
in book or magazine, and there was no one to
talk to- and the resolution above recorded
seemed to be the most natural thing in the
world. "a glass of something comfortable"
said Tom, land biscuit, and then I'll turn
in"
Then Tom went to the closet to look for a
vessel in which to bring the necessary liquor
for the comfortable something from the cor
ner store, and sped on an upper shelf green
bottle, with a fat body and long neck which
had nothing nit, and Smelled of nothing, and
he set it upon the table, while he stirred the
fire and put the kettle on, that everything
might be ready on his return.
Mrs. Tom was absent from home, and Tom
was keeping house for himself. He was on
his knees before the stove, raking it, when he
heard grOan. 1t was faint, far-away
sounding groan; but it had such a ghostly
sound that he started.
What's that?" he cried and something
answered.:
"Ony me-"
And jumping to his feet, Tom Barnaby
stood staring about; for there was nothing
in the room that ought to have had voice
but himself-not even kitten or canary
bird.
"Who is me?" cried Tom
tom ought to know said the voice.
green bottle.
Hanged if it isn't the bottlev said Tom
SIS it spirits, or what?'
And the bottle answered:
YES, worse luck. 1t is spirits. Bad spirits
too. Gin, rum and brandy-whisky and al
cohol!'
"Oh. that kindr' said Tom
Eyes," said the bottle. Five devils I've
been possessed by them all. Years and years
they led me such a life that Iwished / was
smashed; years and years until your wife got
me and put blessed vinegar in me. Nice,
sharp, respectable vinegar that never did
worse than give some poor cabbage eater the
collie. And | thought l should end my days
in decent vinegar BOTTLE and here | am
going to have one of the devils back, know
on, what did that dear woman go away for?
Why did she go?''
Tom, who had grown used to the phe-
nomenon of a talking bottle, and did not
mind it at all by this time, nodded his head
sagely.
uncomfortable to have wife away. butyo are
very foolish to talk as you do. What harm is
there in a moderate drink? All you'd hold
wouldn't hurt fly. You've been listening to
teetotalers."
II haven't been listening to anybody" said
the Dottle. II We formed my own conclusions.
There was time when thought as you do.
1t was when was brand new bottle, with
gilt label, Best Holland Gin,' on me, and my
owner the liquor dealer, took me out of my
case and handed me to Jack Barker, who
had just finished painting the store.
'''Here, jack says he, this will help you
keep Christmas
""rhank ye,' said Jack; and off went un
der his arm.
"And there, in q bright little room, with a
pretty wife and nice old grandfather and
two cunning little babies looking on, he
| opened me.
"'What nice smeIlr said she-the pretty
| wife
And then he made some stuff with lemon
and sugar, and they all drank some; and the
babies looked at the light shining through my
| green sides and the gilt label on me- And the
old grandfather said the drink had gone to
| his head, and he should have to be carried
upstairs and they laughed at that, because
| 1t was such good joke
| Il liked myself then and what was in
me.
Before I was empty the first time l felt
| pleased to be such favorite as was
"Ah, dear; was filled up again. and again.
and again; and after awhile | began to see
| things changing about me. The wife's face
| was not so bright; the old grandfather never
laughed; the babys toes were out; and one
| day Jack staggered in, took me up, drank the
last drop from me and tumbled into chair.
"'Oh, Jack! says she. oh, Jackl how 1
| hate that dreadful bottle. We were so happy
before it came into the hOuse!'
| ''She blamed me but knew it was the evil
| spirit in me she meant.
you've lost your place, Jack, says She
Everything has changed. You don't love me
any more. You don't care for the children
| It's all that bottle
But Jack was too tipsy to care what she
said; He staggered over to the table, took me
by the neck and carried me to liquor store.
| There they put another evil into me. That
one drove the furniture out of the house; bit
by bit it was pawned.
'1hen they left the house itself and we're
| living in cellar somewhere. She took in
| washing; some of the money she earned went
| Tor more evil spirits to fill nae.
Didn't ] lOathe myself? One night / sat
on the table and saw the old grandfather lying
dead and Jack drunk on the floor at the foot
of the bed. Didn't ! loathe myself? / tried to
| topple of, but couldn't manage it. If ever
bottle did desire to smash itself, did. But it
| was no use. Happy bottles, beautiful cut
glass cologne bottles, innocent water bottles
last, no doubt; but J. who had become a
dwelling-place for devils, lasted.
"Ihey carried the old grandfather away,
and his poor daughter got black dress some
how. One night Jack went sneaking out of
the house with bundle under one arm and
me under the other. The bundle was his
wife's mourning dress for her father He
took it to a pawn-shop and pawned it for
enough to fill me twice The poor woman
never had decent dress again.
Il
seen Jack clutch her hand and wrench the
money she'd earned for her chidren's bread
from it, and then go off with me. Think of it,
had to aid and abet him, and hear her say
things about me that were very natural see
ing that she didn't know how hated the dew
lis that lived in me, but that were hard to
bear. But he fell downstairs with me in his
pocket and broke his head, and didn't break
me. He hit me against things to their injury,
not mine. l must have a guardian devil,
lasted so.
zone day-it was such bitter day, ice and
snow and sleet everywhere-just five years
from the Christmas I'd been made a present
to Jack, he stood, ragged and dirty, at q bar
room stove, with me in his pocket-my neck
sticking out Up came the proprietor.
Now, Jack Barker, ',lsays he, why don't
HE was ashamed to have him there, you
see, ragped creature with his toes out and
black eye and broken nose. He used to be
called Handsome Jack Barker before he took
to filing me. Think of that.
Now he looked up with miserable, abJect
whine.
say go home when came here with full peck
"'Weli no. I didn't said the man; and it
would have been better if had. I'll fill your
bottle for YOU, Jack Barker.
"He filed it-goodness knows with what
and the poor wretch staggered home. Oh, the
wretched cellar; the miserable straw bed in
the corner; the wife lying sick upon it. re-
member them so well.
"She was very sick. and there was little
baby beside her. just think of another baby
there.
Happy Christmasr said he, as he stag.
gered in. Happy Christmas, old girlp
:" 'Happy!' said she. oh, this dreadful
day! That bottle came to US first on Christ
mas
ut takes so little to put a drunken man in a
rage. He answered her with an oath
ANYBODY would think Twas drunk TO hear |
you talk, said he. And the poor woman an
swered:
oh, good Heavenl are you ever sober? Oh,
Jacki Jackr
And then he few at her. He took me by |
the neck and beat her over the head with me. |
The cork fell out and the liquor poured over |
her breast and over the face of the little baby |
lying upon it. 1t mingled with her blood.
AT first she screamed. Then she lay still. |
Her face grew white. / knew was a MUIR
derer. oh, let me break cried. Let me be |
broken into fragments But her fair flesh |
was mashed to pulp. her delicate bones broken, |
and was sound as ever, when Jack, led by |
Heaven knows what mad fancy, left his vic /
tim and staggered into the street again. The |
snow was falling. The air was white with it. |
He staggered along, muttering to himself. At /
last he came to wharf and stumbled across |
1t. believe boat lay there on which he mad |
been once before and on which they had given i
him drink,