The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1885-06-04
PuNeENT PARAGRAPHS.

"A Lewiston seamstFess carelessly left
a needle in the back of q young lady
customers dress, and now q particular
friend of the family has his arm done uv
in naturalization (Me.) Journal. b
There are twenty ways of cooking
q potato, and three hundred and sixty
five ways of cooking an egg, Here
culture ends, for there is but one way of
swallowing either of them.-Los0eU
Citizen.
1t is claimed that you can tell when
it is noon-time by looking at cats
eyes. We can't see what cats size
has to do with noon-tlme unless you
are thinking of having rabbit for dinner.
Darlington Haaokeye.
There are said to be over two thou.
sand postmasters in the United States
with salary of less than ten dollars Q
year. At Redela, N. c., last year, the
salary was nine cents.-N Y. Mail
When the fire reporter gets as far
as ''the lurid glare of forked flames
shooting athwart the dark-domed sky"
it is time for the city editor to put ON a
condenser and get at the facts Of prop.
erty destroyed. ~. O. PicGyuHe.
Not sugar-coated: She-'There is
often vast difference between a boor
and bore" He (fishing)-'sAnd are
most men either one or the other?"
She (wearily)-"Well. a man is q boor
when he does not call on us, and gem
orally bore when he does. Life.
-Maxfield Bean was in manufac.
turing town last week, when very
fashionably dressed young man passed
along. Hew told that It was clerk
in one of the cotton mills and quite
lady's man.. In fact the girls had
spoiled him. ''That was my idea Of
him." said Maxfeld Bean; ''if not
spoilt, thought he was Q little mill
dude. ."-MelroSe journal.
Are you fond Of etchingsp" asked
the young man who had taken the host
ess' pretty niece from the country down
to supper. "As general thing, yes"
she answered, looking up into his eyes
with an engaging frankness that threat
ened havoc to his heart; ''but, she added
hastily, as he started to say something
pretty, mot any tonight. thank you
it is rather late. A very little Of sherbet
is all care for. "-Bosfots Beacon.
First Bohemian-What's the mat.
terP You look i'll. Second Bohemian
Il am suffering from writer's cramp.
'1ndeed! But you seem to have the use
of your wrist, and did not suppose you
had had much chance to be over.
worked" "Ah! it is not in my wrist,
and is not caused by overwork. Then
where is it, and what is the causePn at
is in my stomach, and is caused by
vacuum. ."--PhiiGdelphia CdlI.
A nice old gentleman, seeing Lao
eating an orange, told the boy not to
swallow the skin, because it would
make him sick. The lad was thus saved
from probable sickness by the nice old
gentleman's thoughtfuIness. The lad
threw the skin out at the window, and
the nice old gentleman went out and
sat down very hard upon the sidewalk
The nice old gentleman will not tell
lads hereafter that orange peels should
not be eaten-BOston Post.
Dear to the heart:
How dear to the heart are the chestnuts Of
The baidheaded Jokes that our infancy
The puns prehistoric we vented in wild mood,
And ancient conundrums SO feeble and
fewl 4E
What sweet recoIlectiOns rise quickly and
High up to that pitch where the briny tears
well.
when.we hear from the lips of the clown at
The crutch-ridden chestnuts we ali love 20
tell
The moss-covered ohestnuts, the mildewed
And jokes that were aged before Adam fell.
o~