Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1885-08-21
THE EMPEROR e
Bill Nye Chats Gracefully About the An.
Client Eiddler-How Nero Punished Often.
sive P~artisanshlp.

wye ChAtS Gr3cefully ABOUT the AM
cient Eiddler-How Nero Punished Often.
sive Partisanshlp.
Nero, who was a Roman Emperor
from 81 to 60 A. D.. was said to have
one of the most disagreeable mon
archs to meet that Rome ever had. He
was a nephew of Caligula, the Emperor,
on his mothers side, and ason of DOM
initius Ahenobarbus, of st. Lawrence
County. The above was really Nero's
name, but in the year SO A. u. his
mother married Claudius, and her son
adopted the name of Nero Claudius
Caesar Drusus Germanicus. This name
he was in the habit of wearing during
the cold weather buttoned up in front. |
During the hot weather Nero was al.
the name he wore.
In 50 Nero married Octavia, daughter !
OF Claudius, and went right to house
keeping. Nero and Octavia did not get
along tirst-rate. Nero soon wearied OF
his young wife, and finally transferred
her to the New Jerusalem.
In "a Nero's mother, by c%oncealing
the rightful heir to the throne for sew.
eral weeks and %doctoring the returns,
succeeded in getting the steady job OF
Emperor for Nero at a good salary.
His reign was quite stormy. and sew.
eral long, bloody wars were carried on
during that period. He was a good,
.vicarious fighter, and could success.
fully hold a mans coat all day while
the man went to the front to get killed.
He loved to go out riding over the bat.
tle-tields, as soon as it was safe, in his
%gorgeously bedizened band chariot, and
he didn't care if the wheels rolled in
gore up to the hub, providing it was
some other mans gore. 1t gave him
great pleasure to drive over the field OF
carnage and gloat over the dead. Nero
was not agreat success as an Emperor.
but as q gloater he has no rival in his.
tory.
Nero's reign was characterized also
by the great confagration and fire.
works Of July, Ga, by which two-thirds
Of the city of Rome was destroyed. The
Emperor was charged with starting this
fire in order to get the insurance on 9
stock of dry goods on Main street.
Instead of taking off his crown, hang.
ing it upin the hall, and helping to put
out the fire, as other Emperors have
done time and again. Nero took his
violin up stairs and played 'I'll Meet
You When the Sun Goes Down" This
'occasioned a great deal of adverse
criticism on the part of those who
opposed the administration. Several
person openly criticised Nero's policy
and then died.
A man in those days would put on
his overcoat in the morning and tell
his wife not to keep dinner waiting. 81
am going down town to criticise the En-.
peror a few moments" he would say.
eff l donot gethome in time for dinner,
meet me on the evergreen shore"
"Nero after the death of Octavia,
married Poppea Sabina. She died
afterward at her husbands earnest
solicitation. Nero did not care SO
much about being a bridegroom, but
the excitement Of being a widower al.
ways gratitied and pleased him.
He was a very Jealous monarch, and
kept Rome pretty we'll stirred up
during his reign. If a man failed to
show up anywhere on time, his friends
would look sadly at each other and
say: ''Alas! he has criticised Nero"
A man could wrestle with the yellow
fever, or the smallpox, or the Asiatio
cholera and stand a chance for recov.
cry, but when he spoke sarcastically Of
Nero it was goodbye, John.
When Nero decided that q man was
offensive that man would generally
put up the following notice on his Office
door:
"Gone to see the Emperor. Meet
me at the cemetery at two O'clock"
Finally, Nero overdid this thing and
ran it into the ground. He did not
want to be disliked, and so those who
disliked him were killed. This made
people timid, and muzzled the press d
good deal.
The Roman papers in those days
were all on n side. They did not
dare to be fearless and outspoken fol-
fear that Nero would take out his ad.
So they would contine themselves to
the statement that ''The genial and
urbane Afranius Burrhus had painted
his new and recherche picket fence last
| week. or, 'Our enterprising fellow
| townsman, Caesar Kersikes, will re,
| move the tail of his favorite bulldog
next week, if the weather should be
auspicious," or
.'Miss Agrippina Bangoline, eldest
| daughter of Romulus Bangoline, the
great Roman rinkist, will teach the
school at Eupatorium, Trifoliatum
Holler. this summer. She is a highly
accomplished young lady and a good
speller."
Nero got more and more fatal as he
grew older, and finally the Romans
began to wonder whether he would not
wipe out the empire before he died.
His back yard was full all the time OF
people who had dropped in to be killed,
so that they could have it off their
minds.
Finally Nero himself yielded to the
great strain that had been placed upon
him, and in the midst of an insur:
rection in Gaul, Spain and Rome itself,
he fled and killed himself.
The Romans were very grateful fol
Nero's great browning act in the kill
ing line, but they were dissatisfied be.
cause he delayed it so long, and there
fore they refused to erect a tall monu.
ment over his remains. While they
admired the royal suicide, and re.
,,loJ - 90 n c,,ooacS thov ooocuroI