davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

Il don't understand why women
dress that way said man pointing
to lady who passed along the street
II don't either" replied bystander
THAT woman" continued the first
speaker, ''is dressed ridiculously Her
husband must be fool" Il know he
is, i" said the bystander "Do you know
him?" "Oh, yes. I'm the blamed fool
myself
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

steamboat owner was explaining
how he happened to change captains
on the Comet. Said he:
Il came down on her from Port HUI
ron, and as we reached the city l says
to the captain, Better drop in at the
foot of Rivard street and let me off,
MY first landing is at the copper
dock, three miles below he answers.
But this is my boat and | want her
to land where l said
But I'm captain, sir, and she goes
to the copper dock.
'Starboard, says l to the man at
the wheel
Port, says the captain.
rung the bell for the engineer to
slow down, and the captain rang for
him to go ahead at full speed.
Captain Comas, has the owner of
steamboat no rights?n l asked
Lots of 'em on shore, but none on
the water says he.
1'll discharge you the moment we
land
Very well, but don't get sassy, me
boy. have twenty minutes to serve
yet
with that l starts to take the wheel.
and in five minutes | was in irons as a
mutineer, and | went ashore with the
handouts on
But you discharged him?s
oh, yes
And is the new captain any better?'
We'll, l dunno. l never dared
tackle him. "--Detr0it Free Press.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

Sorrow itself is not so hard to bear
as the thought.of sorrow coming. Airy
ghosts that work no harm do terrify
us more than men in steel with bloody
purposes.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

The colored sunset and the starry
heavens, the beautiful mountains and
the shining seas, the fragrant woods
and the painted flowers, they are not
half so beautiful as a soul that is serv
ing Jesus out of love, in the wear and
tear of uncommon poetic life.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

No TIME TO SPARE.-''My DEAR" i'm
plored husband, will you be kind
enough to sew some buttons on my
overcoat? They are nearly all off"
II am very sorry" replied the wife,
with a look of real regret as she fast
ened her bonnet on, but the heather
are suffering, and haven't moments
time to spare. lam late for the sewing
society as it is?"
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17
Cumberland & MQRnCe RlveYR. r

Trains leave Port Norris at GAO a. m and 40
p. M, arriving at West Jersey Depot, Bridgeton,
in time to take the a. IN. and 3l5 p. m. trains
for Philadelphia.
Returning on arrival of Philadelphia trains
at 10 a. m. and 5.15 p. m, stopping at stations
on the line.
Freight on 10 a. m south and 40 D. IN. north
dec Is L. H. DOWDNEY Supt
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

Let us care for the little ones around
us as we would for tender plants, car
ing for them, and nurturing them,
that their full beauty may be devel-
oped
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

Young chicks come into the world
with the yolk of the egg stored away
for their Immediate nourishment and
therefore they need no feed for twelve
to tWentY-fnllr hnnrS
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17

Fall does not come until the ther-
mometer falls.
1t requires no skill to play the kazoo.
All that is needed is wind and Il gener-
al desire to be disagreeablc.
The campaign lie must be nailed rs
soon as possible, else orators will be
demanding offices for telling it.
One second used 10 be the quickest
time on record; but watches TO split
seconds have since been invented
AeW orleans Picayune.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17
How Lost, How Restored!
THE CULVERWELL MEDICAL co

nAnn St., New York, N. Y; Post Office Box 45O
sep lily
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17
A Plea for Slang.

Slang is, indeed, a very good fertiliz-
er. 1t serves to give new fruitfulness
to language. 1t gives emphasis to
speech, and not rarely ornament to
language. In the offer to check the
course of slang, there should be judi
cious care lest in trying to preserve
the so-called beauty and purity Of
language, we deprive thought of a
noble savant, for words are, after all,
nothing more than the insensible con-
duits of living thought; and, it is in
tinitely better to have a great idea
clearly and comprehensively expressed
by new means than dwarf it by limit
ing it to the elegant inaptitude of the
photographers manual.-Chicago Int,
Ocean.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1885-09-17
UNEQUALED by Any Other Condi-
ton Powder in the Market

Practical men of sound, mature Judgment
ana large experience, who have given it a fair
ana practical trial, say it is the best Learned
men men . sclentlc men, men of sterling integrity,
VINO nave tested 1t fully and impartially saw it
IS the BEST and after you have given it a lair
trial you will say it is the best. The Pennsyl-
Vanla state Agricultural Society has pro
nounced 1t the best every time it has been be-
lore them, and so with County Agricultural So
cletles on every occasion of competition it
has taken the FIRST PREMIUM
Please read few of the many testimonials
of those who have used it and handled if and
know whereof they affirm.
MT. HOLLY, N. j., Mar. 20. 1ss5.
Dl'. A so Jones. Phlddelphid:
DEAR Strive have sold your Cattle Powder
about four months and it has proved so salts
factory that we are entirely losing demand for
any other. Send us dozen 5tb packages
1oufs truly, CLINE 81 GRIGG.
BIRMINGHAM, Nj. MAY 20. 1884
Dl'. Asa Jones, Pttddelphiu:
DEAR SIR have just cured two very severe
cases cases OF Sc0urs in my calves by using your
Cattle Powder after all the home remedies 7
could think of or heard of had failed Very
Respectfully GEO. E. ROSSEL.
PEMBERToN. N. j.. June %. 1884
DR.. Asa Jones, Philddelphia:
DEAR SIR:-l have used your excellent Cattle
Powder this Spring, for my Horses. Cattle and
j. .GRIGG, NJ. d.
,,al fAiRwiEW an io VILLAGE, Montgomery Co., Pa,
Dr. Asa Jones, PhUddelphia:
- DEAR SIR:-i have sold your Alternative and
digestive Cattle Powder about fifteen years. |
find it the best can get and it has become so
popular with my trade that have yery little
demand for any other. will need more soon
Yours truly, NJ. HARLEY
BIRMINGHAM, n. j., May 80 1888
Dr.. Asa Jones, fhilddeIDhia: - ~ ~
DEAR SIR:-Jones' Cattle Powder is the best
have ever used, and have had an experience
OF twenty years with different powders NV
horses and Cattle never did so well under any
other powder. | also used it to condition n
stable OF horses belonging to the estate of II
H. Prlce, and their Improvement was so rapid
ana sudden as to attract univ versal attention as
all the neghbors will attest
Respectfully yours, J.C. .GASKILL.
Prepared solely by
ASA JONES, NJ. D.,
S. E. Cor. 18th and MARKET SITS
PHILADELPHIA.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
HOME AND FARM,

Raw meat. if fed sparingly, is as
good as cooked for laying hens. Troy
Times.
If the teeth be brushed with soap
daily and once week with salt. the
formation of tartar VIII be arrested
Chicago Times.
The Philadelphia Press says two
thirds of the orchards reported dying
Of old age are really starving to
Heath. They need manure.
The foliowingss recommended as
excellent for keeping blood-sucking
flies from horses and cattle: Mix
twenty parts of glycerine with one
part carbolic acid and rub lightly on
the hair. but not on the skin. ALBANY
Journal.
When you are ready to sow your
wheat select the choicest and plumpest
grain. Shriyeled seed should never be
used. With good seed one-half the
difficulty is removed. Make the seed
bed fine and have all the conditions as
favorable as possible. Toledo Blade.
The oftener carpets are shaken the
longer they wear. The dirt that col.
lects under them grinds out the threads.
Do not sweep carpets ofteher than is
necessary. A broom wears them very
much. When carpet is faded, strong
salt and water will often restore the
brightness of the or.-Detroat Post.
In selecting trees give preference
to those with smooth, healthy-looking
bark. which have entirely shed their
leaves and have plenty of small, fl
brous roots. Trees on which the leaves
remain after the first frost sets in and
stick to the branches in the spring may
be regarded as not healthy. &
change.
Don't milk troublesome COW, but
turn a calf or two to her and let them
do the milking. An average COW will
raise four calves to veal age during
season, and these will bring forty to
fifty dollars. This is often more than
can be made from her milk. The same
policy would pay farmers situated at
distance from market. AS rule it
will pay them better to let their cows
raise calves than to make butter and
cheese to sell.-fra5rie Farmer.
Coffee Cake: Two cups brown
sugar, one cup butter, five eggs, one
half cup molasSes, one nutmeg grated,
two teaspoonfuls cinnamon, one tea
spoonful cloves. one-half cup made
coffee, three hcaping cups flour, one
cup raisins, one cup currants, one tea
spoonful saleratus dissolved in warm
water, one-quarter pound eff citron,
one teaspoonful lemon extract. Cream
butter and sugar together, and be sure
to flour the fruit before stirring it in;
bake in moderately fast oven.-Ihe
household.
-Chow-C Chow: One-half peck finely.
chopped green tomatoes, five white
onions chopped; salt these over night;
in the morning squeeze as dry as pos
sible, then add one small tablespoonful
of ground black pepper, one small ia
blespoonful of ground allspice, two
small tablespoonfuls of ground cloves,
four of mustard. one and one-half ia
blespoonfuls of horse-radish, grated,
six mountain sweet peppers sliced very
finely, one-half pint of white mustard
seed. Mix well and add cold vinegar.
say one quart, then put in wide.
mouthed bottles.-BostOna Globe.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
Publication of Poultry Houses.

Here is a good remedy for hen lice.
Carl Ole acid costs about twenty cents
a quart in the crude unrefined state.
It can be used in many different ways.
In summer little of it mixed with wa
ter in watering pot and sprinkled all
over the quarters will drive lice
away for awhile, but it must be done
often in order to keep them from re-
turning. Carbolic acid is perfect dis
infectant and purifes the atmosphere
and surroundings of a fowl house. as
sisting thereby to ward off disease and
impurities arising from contact of the
fowls with each other. Every careful
poulterer keeps this acid always on
hand, as it is indispensable as corn or
oats. You must take care because it is
violent poison, but harmless in the
hands of a prudent and judicious per
son. The best way to use this acid is
to put teaspoonful in a pail of white
wash. apply thickly to the walls of
fowl house, let no crack or opening be
missed. Also apply it to the nests,
roosts, floor, and then the fowl house
will be free from lice. bugs and insects
of any kind Milk. either fresh Or sour
butter-milk, or skim milk, mixed with
meal, is Just the kind of food for fowl,
be they small or large. Western PoW-
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
Listen to Your Wife.

The Manchester GUAnDIAs. june sth. 1855 says: A.
Windows
Looking on the woodland waysl With
clumps of rhododendroms and great masses
of May blossoms III "There was an inter
esting group.
1t included one who had been a "Cotton
spinner" but was now so
) Paraiyzed!l!
That he could only bear to lie in reclin-
ing position.
This refers to my case
I was first Attacked twelve years ago
with "Locomoter Ataxy"
paralytic disease OF nerve hberrarely cured
about
And for the last Five years not able to
attend to my business, although
Many things have been done for me-
TIVE ss sso
Home for lncurablesl Near Manchester.
in May, 1882.
am no 8 Advocate For anything in
the shape of patent Medicines?
And made many objections to my dear
wife's constant urging to try Hop Bitters,
but finally to pacify her
COnSented!I
had not quite finished the first bottle
when felt change come over me. This
was Saturday, November Sd. On Sunday
morning l felt SO strong I said to my room
companions, 81 was sure I could
"Walk!
So started across the floor and back.
Hardly knew how to contain myself Twas all over
the house am gaining strength each day, and can
walk quite safe without any
stick"
Or Support
am now at my own house, and hope soon to be ablo
to earn my own living again. have been a member
of the Manchester
Royal Exchange
For nearly thirty years, and most heartily
graduated on going into the room Thursday last.
Very gratefully yours, JOHN BLACKBURN,
MANCHEsTER (Eng.) Dec. "a, 1883
Two years later am perfectly well.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
INSANE LABOR.
An Experiment in Progress at the Norris
town (E'a.) Asylum.

An Experiment in Progress at the Norris
town (pa.) Asylum.
An experiment is being made at the
Insane Hospital at Norristown, Pa. in
which we may all properly feel some
interest. 1t is the attempt to discover
what may be the results of giving de-
mented people something 10 do, the
trial of insane labor. This may be
still in the experimental stage else
where, as well as here. but here it has
already been proven a success. as, no
doubt, to some limited extent, in other
places The writer was shown into a
room where fifty or sixty men were
busily employed in brush-making.
a simple. easy handicraft. the
patients being variously stationed ac-
cording to their degree of mental bal
ance, some simply smoothing off edges
and rounding the corners. In other
rooms were arrangements for shoe
rug-manufacture, chair-seat-
ing, etc. One could not but note the
contrast between these half-busy rooms
and the dull. self-centering and dis
tracing wards. 1t was at least like
giving fretful child some little thing
to occupy his mind. and the
testimony is that the
wholesome effect upon the entire life
and character of the patient is some
thing remarksble.-C Chicago Standard.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
Dangers from Which Engineers Save the
Public and Themselves.
1.-THE Railway Review

1.-THE Railway Review.l
One who is accustomed to railway
he is dependent for safety upon the en-
gineer. Added to the responsibility of
their station, engineers are also in con-
slant danger of accidents caused by the
tricks of jealous rivals.
This rivalry, it is said, sometimes
A Nickle Plate engineer after his very first
trip was laid of because he had "cut out"
all the bearings of his engine. He was re-
instated, however, after he proved that
emery. Another new engineer was sus-
pended for burning out the fues of his
boiler. Through grief at the loss of his
position he died, and then conscience
oil in the tank SO that it foamed and showed
water at the top gauge, when in reality
there was scarcely quart i'll the boiler!
These intense jealousies, together with
the terrible anxiety incident to their
work, have terribly straining effect on
the nerve, and statistics tell that,
though Locomotive Engineers may look
strong and vigorous, they are not all
healthy class. Ex-Chief Engineer A. S.
Hampton, indianapolis, Ind, Civ. 14S)
but he says: ''The anxiety, strain and
jolting came near finishing me.'' His suf-
ferings localized in catarrh of the bladder,
but he used Warmers safe cure faithfully
Ior twenty weeks anu now e4clalius'
am a we'll man." T. S. Ingraham, of
Cleveland, O., Assistant Chief Engineer,
and other prominent members are also
emphatic in its praise.
The Locomotive Engineers Brotherhood
has II, 900 members and $40 divisions. It's
headquarters are in Cleveland, o., where
Chief Engineer Arthur for twenty years
has exercised almost dictatorial sway. 1t
was organized in August, 1863 by the en-
ployes of the Michigan Central. 1t has
given nearly two million dollars to the
widows and orphans of deceased members.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
the bureau to trace the ownership at

the bureau to trace the ownership at
Washington. This effort proved sue
cessful, and the bonds were returned
to their owner, who lived in the South
But no word of thanks, nor even of
recognition of the labors of the de-
partment. was ever received.
A great deal of trouble and expense
is annually saved the citizens of New
York by the efficient work of this de-
partment. 1t RECEIVERS large amour
OF money and valuables which pri-
vate individual could never secure, not
having at his disposal the information
and experience which the bureau has
acquired. The service rendered to
justice by the apprehension of large
number of criminals every year is also
large.-N. W. HorEd.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
A Practical Suggestion.

A Texas Judge showed considerable
unwilIingness to grant man d.
vorce. The Judge sad to the appli-
cant:
"Refect for a moment that your wife
with all her faults has her good quail
ties, and that by mutual concession you
may be able to get along very well to-
gether."
The applicant for divorce seemed to
be very much moved by what the Judge
said. and the latter began to Halter
himself that he had carried his point.
At last the man said:
Your Honor is not married, I be.
ieve?''
NO I am widower.'
We'll then, Judge, suppose you
grant me divorce from this woman,
and then marry her yourself, and see
if you can stand her impish temper"
The Judge begged leave respectfully
to decline.
Eyes" responded the applicant,
scornfully, ''you are mighty kind pre-
scribing medicine for other people. but
you don't care to try dose of it your.
self. "-IeI0s ,Sittings.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
The Cause of His Wickedness.

You don't mean to say that your
mother was the cause of your going to
the bad?" said woman to a criminal
in prison.
II reckon that's about the size of it,
num-"
Ridiculous! How could that be,
STRIP
swell. you see. she alluz cut my hair
when { was little helpless boy, mum.
and if you could a seen what dread
full muss she made of it, you wouldn't
wonder at my bein' here now. Chi
cago Ledger.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

"A once very popular pastry was
called Washington pie. 1t was highly
favored with cinnamon, probably for
the purpose of Disgusting the taste of
the unknown ingredients entering into
its compost on. A large slab was sold
for three cents and immense quantities
of it were consumed by small boys. Of
late years it has almost entirely disap-
peared. and its place in the pie econ
omy has been taken by the mealy
cheesecake. which possesses equally fill
ing qualities, and has the advantage of
being composed of known materials. -
Z2'0u Times.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

E100, 000, 600 IN THE BRITISH CouRr or
CHANcERYl-A large part OF this vast sum
belongs to the people of America. Cox &
Co., Al southampton + fildings, Holborn,
London, Eng, have just published LIST
OF the heirs to this enormous wealth.
Reader, send dollar and they win for
ward you this valuable LIST; and il YOU
find by 1t that you are entitled to any
money or property, claim your own. Cox
& Co. will show you the way.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

is precept easily preached, but not so
easy to practice. If person has no appe-
tite, but a distressing nausea, sick head
ache, dyspepsia, boils, or any other i'll re-
sulting from inaction of the bowels, it is
impossible to get up such laugh as will
produce aldermanic corpulence. In order
to laugh satisfactorily you must be well,
and to be well you must have your bowels
in good order. You can do this and laugh
heartily with DR.. Pierce's pleasant Purg-
ative Pellets" the little regulators of the
liver and bowels and best promoters Of
jollity
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
"shoot Polly as She Flies"

was the way it appeared in the proof-sIip.
The argus-eyed proof reader, however,
knew the quotation intended and changed
it to read: "Shoot Folly as she fiies.5
Pope. OF course it was an error, yet how
many are daily committing much graver
errors by allowing the first symptoms of
consumption to go unheeded. If afflicted
with loss of appetite, chilly sensations, or
hacking cough, it is suicidal to delay a
single moment the use of DIR. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery" the great
and only reliable remedy yet known for
this terribly fatal malady. Send two let
Use on this disease. Address Worlds Dis
pensary Medical Association, Buffalo, NY.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
Prosecute the S,ciuaxers y!y

out anything but Hop Bitters with green cluster
of Hops on white label. shun that druggist as You
would viper; and If he has aiken your money for
bogus stuff tndct him for the fraud and sue him for
literally for the conviction.
See Z. S. Court Injunction against c. d. Warner
Reading, Mich. and all his statesmen and agents.
Druggists, and other im:tators take warning:
HOP BITTERS MFG co.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

An exchange speaks of 'smineral wool"
Let's see. That's the kind they shear
from hydraulic rams. isn't it?-Chicdgo
Journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

wife dressed in deep black, and inquired
the reason. Mourning for my late hus.
band" she replied.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

Delicate diseases radically
cured. Consultation free. Address, Worlds
Dispensary Medical Assoc'n, Buffalo, n. Y,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

WHAT the inebriate sees may very often
be described as circular saw. - onkers
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

"THE battle is not always to the
strong" said the judge, as he awarded
the butter premium at a county fair.-St.
Paul Herald.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

The skeleton of a man nine feet
one inch long was found in cave in
Oregon County, Missouri, recently.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08

PIKE TOOTHACHE DROPS cure in minute, 25c.
Gfenn's Sulphur Soap heals and beauties 25c.
GERMAN CORN REMOVER kills Corns & BunionS.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-10-08
Laugh and Grow Fat

MADAME MoDJEsKA has turned trans
lator and will Polish up Shakespeare
Boston Post
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-03-07
chambers and Mango.

Police Officer Reynolds, who is detailed to
hunt up diseased animals, was met yesterday
on his way out to the vicinity of Little
Britain, on King street, where he was going
to dispatch 4 glandered mule. He reports
that Pumber of diseased horses have been
taken out of town in the direction of Wal
kiki, and there abandoned to die. He also
gives it as his opinion that the number of
diseased dogs is increasing, and that they
should be observation-disclosures that he knows
of any dogs having the CHAMBERS, but that
many of them are used up with the mango
and other canine complaints. 1t is about
time the police should grid themselves with
their lassoes, and ''haul in " the annual
crop of worthless, ownerless, vagabond ours.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1885-03-07
Death of an old Hawaiian.

Yesterday morning at $50 o'clock, Mr..
William Adams, son of Captain Alexander
Adams, died at his residence at Niu, east of
Honolulu. The deceased was about 60 years
of age. He was born on the Islands, and
leaves one brother, Isaac, together with his
family. The founder of the family, Captain
Alexander Adams, was contemporary of the
first Kamehamehas, and when the Hawaiian
flag was designed insisted upon the English
Jack being placed in the union. The de-
ceased was charter member of Engine Com
pany No. 2, and a member of the Mechanics
Benefit Union. His funeral Will take place
this afternoon at O'Clock, from the resi-
dence of his brother-in-law, Mr.. Willian
Aud, at Palama. The flags of the Fir,
Department were displayed at half-mas
yesterday.