davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
KEEP IT PURE.

The Life is the BlOOd-Prevent Disease-Sur.
gerry the Last ResOrt-A Telling Letter.
Here is fact for you to think over, viz. Medical
science proves that diseases, matter how great
variety they seem to have, proceed from Compare
lively few causes. 1t is for this reason that some
single medicines relieve or cure so wide range of
complaints-some of them appearing almost direct
ly opposite in their natures. When medical prep.
aration acts at once upon the digestive and urinary
organs, and also purifes the blood, the list of diff
culties subject to its control is astonishing But
while many things are said to possess this power
those which actually do exert it are very rare.
1t is conceded that DIR. KENNEDY'S FAVOR
LIE REMEDY, of Rondout, N. Y :, is the most ef-
fectlve preparation now in for all diseases aris-
ing from foul or impure state of the circulation.
Hence it is more than likely that if the writer of the
following letter had habitaally taken ''FAVORITE
REMEDY" ten years ago, he would never have
suffered from Cancer
Pttsield. Mass, March %, 1884.
DIR. ID. Kennedy, Rondout, N. Y:
Dear Sir About six years ago obliged to
resort to external treatment for the removal of
Gancerous growth on my lip. On my return home
became sensible that my blood needed thorough
cleansing. My whole system, too, required
tonlpg up. While casting about for the best medi-
cine to do this, your "FAVORITE REMEDY"
was so highly commended in my hearing that 1 re-
solved te try it. did so, and the result surprised
me, 1t was effected so quickly and completely. l
soon got over the depression produced by the oper
atlcn, and since the "Favorite Remedy" which
have continued to take in small Doses has kept me
nor expected to have. 1t is the best blood purifier in
the world. L am sure of that. Yours &C.,
MATTHEW FARRELL.
"a Adams Street.
In all cases when consultation is deemed desir-
able,
Address DIR. David Kennedy, Rondout, N Y
But, you have not done so, adopt avorite REM
edy as household friend. 27.3I
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03


always in the write.
If you cannot marry a woman of sense
young man, marry woman of dollars.
''Papa, why do little pigs get so much
milk?" because we want them to make
hogs of themselves"
eff cannot have the fat of the land /
can take little lean, said tramp, as he
rested against lamp post.
Pauline: "SaY, mamma, was it neces-
sary to get up an improved Bible, just
cause the Democrats got in?"
There is rejoicing in Wisconsin. A
boy swallowed trade dollar. Both the
boy and the dollar have retired from cir
culation.
When a woman misses a chance for
contradicting her husband it is a sure
sign that she is working for some new
dry goods.
Colored woman: "Can get the job of
cleaning out this bank, boss?" Bank
President: "Speak to the cashier. He
attends to that
If the English government has any de-
sire to thoroughly irrigate the Soudan
they should get Jay Gould to build a tele-
graph line there.
Scientists say that cigarette smoking
leads to idiocy, but the impression is
gaining ground that the scientists have
got the cart before the horse
"Why does hen cackle?" asks an in
quisitive exchange. We have never read
up on the subject, but always supposed
that the sex Of the bird might account
for it.
Said Bobby to the minister at dinner:
''Can church whistle, Mr.. Long?"
"Why do you ask?" ssCos pa owes $12
back pew rent, and he says he's going to
let the church whistle for it,
Run for the doctor, quick Help help!
Dot baby has swallowed a nickle!' ex-
claimed Mrs. Schaumburg. s'Mine Gott,
you make as much fuss as if it were
$40 gold piece. Be calm, Repecca," re-
piled Moses.
An exchange contains an article entitled
'Points on Burglary" An editor don't
need any such points; his wealth is al
ways so extensive that he is never tempt
ed in the direction to which the contem-
porary refers.
"Didn't you visit Five Points when you
were in New York;" asked friend of
Mrs. Parvenu, who had been south. "Five
Points, she replied; sswell, should say
we did. We visited about one hundred
and fifty points. New York is mighty
big place."
On one occasion friend of Lord Al
vanley came for advice under the follow
ing circumstances "Mr.-has threat
ened to kick me whenever he sees me in
society. What am to do if he comes
into the room?' "Sit down." replied his
Babbett Irvine was recently examined
at Galveston for license to practice law.
in order to constitute last will what is
essential?" asked the lawyer who was
the applicant. ga corpse
and some property is all that is necessa-
ry," was the reply.
Dainty Dude Melinda, how did you
like my seTenade last night?" Melinda
II didn't like your position" 'My posi-
ton? My attitude, you mean" 'sNo,
your position. You weren't far enough
away from me not to hear you, and you |
weren't close enough for me to scald |
you."
'How many oranges for sixpence?"
-Four" was the reply. ssCan I pick |
'hem!" "No, you must take them as they |
come when you buy only six-penny-
worth" "How many must buy before
7ou will let me pick them out?" "Well, |
t you buy the whole lot, then you can
)ick them out"
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
CONSUMPTION CURED.

An old physician, retired from practice, having
had placed in his hands by an East India mission
ary the formula of simple vegetable remedy
for the speedy and permanent cure of Consumption,
Bronchitis, Catarrh, Asthma and all throat and Lung
Affections, also positive and radical cure for Ner
vous Debility and all Nervous Complaints, after
having tested its wonderful curative powers in thou
sands of cases, has felt it his duty to make it known
to his suffering fellows. Actuated by this motive
and desire to relieve human suffering will send
free of charge, to all who desire it, this recipe in
German, French or English with full directions for
and using. Sent by mail by addressing
with stamp, naming this paper. W. A. NoYEs. I49
Powers Block, Rochester, Ny. noy24eowly
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
Why P

The very oldest boy know
Is Robert Adair with his head of tow,
And his brave bright eyes where the questions grow
For this very same boy is asking .ohy
From the time that morning paints the sky
Till the sleepless stars come out ON high.
Why does Jacks kite stay up in the sky?
1t has no wings and yet it can fly!
And sister says wishes go just as high.
Why is oatmeal healthy and candy good?
Is it always naughty to do as you would?
And would you be an angel if you could?
This rose was bud, and why did it burst?
This bird was an egg, and which came first
The egg or the bird, and how was it nursed?
What is the wind and where does it stay?
When it bushes itself and creeps away,
Is it signing or singing, and what does it say?
Why is it bad for a boy to fight,
And for soldler-men so brave and right?
Why do I love you best at night?
Why do the oaks and the elms stand TALL
And the apple tree do the work for all,
With thei, gnarled old branches ready to fall? i
Why does great strong gentleman ride
In a carriage handsome and soft and wide,
And tired old woman walk by the side?
ALI Robin, I'll neither laugh nor cry,
But I'll tell you secret deep and high
The grown-up children keep asking, Why?
And the answers are somewhere safe and fair,
Beyond the stars and the star lit air,
For men and women and Robert Adair.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03

Yes, know that the doctors pre-
scribe whiskey for consumption, but
not quarter as much as they did
five years ago; and within five years
from this time the same doctors who
now prescribe it will be as much
ashamed of it as they are now of
dozen other prescriptions for con-
sumption which have had their run
within the last thirty years. In med
icine fashions change about as often
as they do in dress.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
Grandfather's Baby.

See grandpapa so dignifed,
Walk slowly down the street,
Dispensing smiles on either side,
To all whom he may meet.
Why wears he such a beaming face,
And why so proud mien?
Now, too, he quickens his slow pace;
What can these actions mean?
See baby, little red-faced thing,
Lie screeching on the bed,
With his round fists battering
His features and bald head.
Why is the poor lamb crying so?
What makes him act so bad?
He is not sick nor hungry. No,
He wants to see grandad.
All! here is grandpapa at last;
The baby stops his noise;
For well he knows that grandpapa
Is good to little boys.
He COOS, and laughs, and claps his hands,
And tries in vain to speak;
Although no doubt the time will come
When he can talk in Greek.
Now baby and his grandpapa
Indulge in romp and play,
For grandpa's heart is not old yet
Although his hairs are gray.
And well he loves his little pet.
May he have many more,
And may they all be good like him,
And never cry nor roar.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
A VERY SHARP WITNESS.

Sometimes lawyer meets his
match on the witness stand. Not
long since there was breach of
promise case in an Ohio town. The
usual bully-ragging lawyer was
there, but an unusual witness in the
person of country school marin,
met him.
All, miss, said the lawyer, when
she had taken the oath, will you
state your name.
Elizabeth Martin, she responded
quietly.
Your occupation?
Teaching school.
How old are you? he next lnquir-
ed, with sidelong glance at the
crowd.
Old enough to know that it is none
of your business, she answered as
gently as the ring dove COOS.
Objection sustained, remarked the
court.
The lawyers face fell, but he
braced up and went on, but without
a smile.
Do you know the nature of an
oath? he asked spitefully.
Oh, yes. | heard you damn the
court yesterday on the street for ruI-
ing against you, and I knew you
were not saying your prayers.
The court looked at the lawyer,
the lawyer looked at the ceiling, and
the witness looked at ease.
Confine your answers to the case,
if you please, said the lawyer. Now
will you tell the court if you know
the plaintiff?
Yes, sir, [ know her.
What do you know of her?
More good than / know of law
yers.
That's not what 1 want to know.
presume not, sir, continued the
witness, softly.
want to know, shouted the exas-
perated questioner, bringing his fist
down on the table, if you know any
thing about the case before the
court.
More than you do, possibly.
Well, tell it to the court and have
done with it.
Thanks. l know, your honor,
that Joseph Hill, the defendant, ask
ed Mary Jackson, the plaintiff, if she
would be his wife. 1t was done in
my presence.
Indeed Isn't that rather an unu-
sual way of popping the question.
/ don't know, sir. I have had no
experience. 1 happened to be pres
ent, because l came into the room
unexpectedly and found the plaintiff
sitting in the defendants lap, and
he, to show me that she had a right
to save the furniture in that way
asked her again to be his wife, as he
had already done a week earlier.
By the way, Miss Martin, how
much does the plaintiff weigh?
One hundred and forty pounds,
sir.
How do you know SO exactly?
By the weight, of course. She
smiled, and the lawyer went off on
another track.
Did you think the defendant was
telling you the truth.
Oh, yes; you know he is not
lawyer.
The witness will confine herself to
the facts, interrupted the court.
Very well, your honor, ! shall pay
no more attention TO statements of
the attorney.
That will do, said the provoked
lawyer, the witness may stand down.
May it please the court, she re-
piled, the witness would like to sit
down.
The sheriff will please provide the
with char, said the court.
She seems to have sat down on ev-
else in the courtroom, and
the court sees no good reason why
chair should be exempt.
The witness smiled placidly and
took the chair to await another call
10 the stand.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03

A sharp talking lady was reproved
by her husband, who requested her to
keep her tongue in her mouth. ssMy
dear," she said, "it's against the
law to carry concealed weapons"
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
HOW 1T WAS.

At the battle of Gettysburg was shot through
the left leg and was sent to the hospital The army
surgeons relieved me but pronounced my case in
durable. 1t discharged pieces of bone, and for
years have suffered with running sore. tried
Sulphur Bitters. am now almost well and shall
continue their use.-Old Soldier
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
5000 Acres of Land
For Sa1eI

In Westmore, Orleans County, VT. The larger
part of the timber has been taken from about 5000
acres. 1000 acres good timber land Soil is excel
lent and will make good farms. viii be sold in
Quantities to suit customers. Price, two dollars per
acre and up. Part of the purchase money can re-
main on mortgage. Apply in person or By letter to
West Burke, VT, june 29 2s.37
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
NJ ALA RIA,
As an antimalarial medicine
DIR. DAVID KENNEDY,S
FAVORlTE REMEDY

mas won golden opinions No traveller should con.
slider his outfit complete unless 1t includes bottle of
this medicine. II you are exposed to frequent
changes OF climate, food and water Favorte Remedy
should always be within your reach 1t expels ma
larial posons and is the best n cIiI1a
and malarial fever in the world 1t is especaliy Of
aereq @ as trustworthy specific for of Kidney
arising from an nimpure state Of the blood To Women
FaToTa from any Of the MS peculiar their
railing friend-a real blessing address the nronrie.
$5, by all druggists. - -e' N'-
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
0rleans County Mumitor,
PUBLIsHED WEEKLY BY
GEO. HI. BLAKE,
BARTON, VT.

TERMS.-TWO DOLLARS PER YEAR
strictly in Advance $1.5O. Subscribers living out
side of Orleans County must remit 10 cents extra for
postage. For convenience in remitting, we will
give credit for year and four months for 81 co. to
subscribers in the county, and one year and three
or $500 to subscribers without the county, when
sent strictly in advance.
Rates of Advert sing made known applica-
tion. Ali cuts must have metal body.
Remit by p. o. Money Order, Registered Letter, or
Draft. Watch the label yoar paper and notice
'0he" your subscription expires and that yor pay
ments are kept in advance. When money is sent
zoe shall gue you the credit the label at once, if III
label is not adcanced 'oiin toO ,oeeks, notify by
postal card.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03

conn 1fl0in presents given away Send us sets
LtJlj postage and by mail you will get free
package of goods oflarge value that
VIII start you in work that viii at once bring you in
money faster than anything else in America All
about the S20OOOO in presents with each box Ag'ts
wanted everywhere ofether SEX of all ages for all
the Tune, or spare time only to work for Us at their
own homes Fortunes for all workers absolutely
assured Don't delay. II. Hallett Co., Portland Ne
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03

Don't give up the hope of recovering if you are
afflicted with Heart Disease. DIR. Graves Heart
Regulator has been specific for thirty years
many great cures are known from its use. Free
pamphlet of +. E. ingalls,, Cambridge, Mass.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
MRS. c. C. STEVENS

NHARLES GRAVES, Agent for Connecticut
OGeneral Life Insurance Co., Barton, Vt.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.

A C.AUSTIN, NEWPORT, VT, PROPRIE-
a. tor. This house is located on Main Street
near Fields Block. Teams run to meet trains
Good livery in connection with house. l3-49
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03

P. A. JOHNSON.
T AND SURVEYOR. HAS A SET OF GOOD
A1Surveyor's instruments and will do surveying
at reasonable rates. Enquire at Barton National
Bank. l4-23
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1885-08-03

F. w. BALDWIN.
A TTORNEY AT LAW AND SOLICITOR IN
AChancery, Barton, VT.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01
Our English Friends.

A valued correspondent writes to ask
u.s. "Aren't you a little hard on our
English friends?" Well, no; we don't
think so. We are of thoroughbred
English descent ourself, and have no
notion of abusing the old mother coun-
try or her people. But we Anglo
Americans are almost without excep-
ton descendants of middle-class Eng
lishmen-small gentry, yeomen, trades
men and mariners. We have estab-
lished here middle-class constitution,
upon the basis of liberty and equal
rights. But, with the growth of riches,
snobbery has grown, and our million
aires are working to set up an aristoc-
racy by buying themselves into our
senates, state and national, and making
houses of lords of them. Just as
England is getting ready to put an end
to the class of hereditary Legislators,
an effort is being made to set out the
same noxious plant in American soil.
Great fortunes, are being established,
and ways to perpetuate them in fam
lilies devised, so that unless the move
ment is fiercely fought, we may find
ourselves soon as firmly in the grip of
a moneyed aristocracy as ever old Eng
land was. 1t is not the good things of
English origin, but the bad things,
that we contend against. This was in
tended to be a democratic republic.
Our millionaires are making great
Roadway in Transforming it into an
aristocratic government, under demo-
cratic forms.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01
Handy Things About a Kitchen
Sink, Etc.

Have a small brush to clean the
hands and fnger-nails of dough. An
old scrubbing brush is handy to clean
the coarse crater on which potatoes
are grated for yeast. Pick to pieces
an old corn broom, and tie up in q
bunch handful of the best pieces of
broom corn to beat up flour in cold
water for starching prints. 1t will beat
the Jumps out in no time. A small
piece of thin board, whitfield in shape
like a shovel, is handy to clean kettles
when they need scraping; it will save
knives and finger-nails. think some
one asked how to cleanse porcelain
lined kettles: Boil handful of wood
ashes in them and then rub with bristol
brick. Have small box or basket to
receive all loose buttons. When a
shirt, an apron, or any such cotton gar
ment is worn out, tear off the hens,
remove all buttons to the box and tear
it into straight, smooth pieces. Roll
them up closely and deposit in drawer
for use in cleaning lamps, and many
other things. 1t will save good towels.
If braided mat gets dirty, or soiled
with grease, take it on bench or wide
board and use scrubbing brush and
hot suds. Then rinse thoroughly and
dry. Rag carpeting can be cleaned
the same way. A. M. S.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01
Preparing Seed Wheat.

Mr.. Editor In the first column of
the American Cultiudtor of March 18th
are directions how to manage spring
wheat. 1t says: Wash in pure water,
drain in basket, spread on floor; add
two quarts Stacked lime and one quart
plaster; stir it every day for two weeks
and it will be dry enough to SOW" 1
know that with three quarts of dryer
like that it can be sown Immediately,
or in an hour. My father, and / also,
wash seed wheat with strong lime, as
it will float more light grain, and the
salt and lime or ashes that sticks to
each kernel may be of value as fertil-
izer. If wheat were too moist to sow
continuously ten days it would sprout
badly, and, l think, be eaten by caustic
lime with two quarts ia bushel. Lime
is very destructive to vegetable fiber.
Nowhere in all the North is it consid-
cred best to wait till the soil is dry,
then plow, then wait week more for
the soil to warm. In Dakota they pillow
in the fall and in spring only wait for
the frost to get out of an inch or two
of surface. Our practice is very SINH
lar, as early sowing usually does the
best. Z. E. JAMESON.
Trasburoh VT.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01
Questions, Replies, Etc.

ABOUT TANKAGE, from r. A. H. B.,
Fremont, Ohio" have about six
tons of what meat-packers call tankage
cooked meat, bones, etc. The bones
are tender, and are now broken pretty
fine. / wish to know the best way to
handle this for fertilizer"
REPLY.-A good way to handle tank
age is to compost it with fine soil, say
two or three barrow-loads of soil to
one load of tankage. Mix well to-
gether in square pile, well packed by
treading or beating with shovel. The
pile need not be covered, as rainwater
on the pile will assist decomposition,
but it should not be made where water
will settle in a pool around it. This
pile should be cut down in slices with a
shovel, and remade three or four times,
at intervals of two weeks, or oftener if
any heat is developed, 1t will then do
to apply to crops in the same manner
as stable manure, and will be about as
strong.
ABOUT DANDELIoNs, from Mrs. A
M. S., West Fairlee, VT" Where can
one obtain seeds or plants of dandelions
such as are cultivated for greens? 1t is
vastly easier to grow dandelions thar
to hunt over d farm to find a mess o.
green's"
REpLY.-Most of the city seed-store
sell the seed both of the common dan
delion (Which all may gather for them
selves) and of the broad-leaved or gar
den dandelion, an improved European
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01
Enquiries and Recipe.

Mr.. Editor Have been very much
interested in The Household depart
ment which has been added to our good
paper, and wish to ask for some infor-
nation in regard to crazy silk patch
work. / have heard that Innings are
sold already quilted and ready to fasten
upon the quilt. Can some of the read
ers tell me if this is so and where they
can be obtained? Also, will some one
who has made one-or seen pretty ones
tell how they were trimmed around
the edge?
ROLL JELLY CAKE.-For the benefit
of the readers I give the following ex-
cellent recipe for roll jelly cake: Four
eggs, one cup of dry sugar, one cup
of flour, one tea-spoonful cream of tartar
and half tea-spoonful soda. Bake on
long tins in a quick oven. This guam
tity should be baked on two tins, though
you will have to shake them to make il
cover the bottom of the tins. While
hot, spread with jelly and roll.
Wrap in a clean towel and keep wrapped
until you cut it for the table.
MADGE, Barre, vt.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01

OUR LITTLE PREsENTs.-The were
offered to each and every lady alike,
uhose contributions had been printed in
this department up to date Of last no
tice-March 4. We expect occasionally
to repeat similar offers, of which future
contributors may avail themselves.
They are not to be considered as pay
ment for contributions, but simply as a
friendly acknowledgment, on the part
of The Household editor. If we were
authorized by the publisher to offer
payment, it would, of course, be made
in proportion to the number, length,
etc., of the articles used, but that is not
the case. We mention this to avoid
misunderstanding.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1885-04-01
Recipes.

WAFERs.-Beat two eggs very light,
add two tablespoonful of white sugar.
Roll thin, cut out with biscuit-cutter,
and fry quick in hot lard.
BAKED PEAs.-Peas are very good
baked in the same manner as beans
(of course all farmers wives know how
to bake beans properly, only not put
ting in quite as much pork, seasoning
partly with salt. c., Middlesex, Vt.
GRAHAM RoLLs.-Two cupfuls of
buttermilk, one tablespoonful of sugar,
one tea-spoonful of soda, one coffee
cupful of fine flour, and enough gra-
ham to make stiff batter. Heat the
roll irons on the stove while preparing
the batter. They will rise better and
be less apt to run over.
wN-BREAD.-Two pints of corn
meal, one pint of rye meal, one-halt
cupful of sugar or molasses, one pint OF
sour milk, one heaping tea-spoonful OF
soda. Add warm water enough to
make the mixture as stiff as it can be
stirred with spoon. Pour into an
iron basin and bake three hours in a
moderate oven.