Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-07-17
BRIGHT BITS.

1T is not considered good form in Boston to
use the expression @skin game,N though
"cutlcle pastime" is perfectly prOper.-BOs-
ton Transcript.
THERE Is plague of rats at the Inventors
Exhibition in London, It Is a little curious
that some OF the inventors do not invent a
rat -trap. -LOUis0ike COUrjerJ0uTRGJ.
THOSE who know say that it is easier for a
man TO dodge Woman's parasol on a crowded
sidewalk Than {" persuade Mr.. Cleveland that
they should have an 0lfice.-Bost0n Post.
PRoGREss.-Angry squire ito extravagant
sOn)-"I can't say as ] thought much of my
fathers opinion; but, by George! you seem TO
look upon me as simply born idlotn-
London Punch.
HER pa and ma were safe in bed,
They'd gone TO sleep with the birds1
The girl hung on TO the garden gate
Her beau hung on TO her words.
Cincinnati Merchant TraoeJer.
RATHER EQUTvooAL.-Gus Desmlth was
quite late in arriving at a sOiree given re-
Gently by prominent Austin lady. When he
arrived he Immediately sought her presence,
and. having found her. said:
81 beg 4 thousand pardOns for coming so
late"
MY dear sir" replied the lady, ''you can
never come too late"
Gus thinks this ia hint to stay away alto
gether. -IeDds SiftjRgs.
WHILE the graves OF ex- ConfederAtes were
being decorated in Little Rock, a little girl
who sat near freshly made mound looked
up As some one approached, aud said:
mister, won't you please give me some
flowers to put on this graveY'
is 1t solder's graVe|
mo, STR
"Who Is buried here?"
MY mother"
A moment later the little hands were filed
with howers.-A r6aRs0ao GrdCsler.
I'm going to solve tho problem as to
whether or not dog can De Taught music.
I've engaged music teacher for Nero" SO
said prlm young lady.
lis he making any progress?" was the anx-
ious inquiry.
"Oh, yes: he bowls now most melodiouslv,
and his bark grows daily more flexible. The
pitch of his bark, the music master informs
me, is admirably adapted for cultivation"
the pitch of the bsrks"
His bark Is on the C.'-B0st0n Courier.
81 NEVER did take much stock in that story
about fish being such fine brain food" mad
yertently remarked Smith, and take less
stock In It than ever now, that Pve lived of
little else for some time past. think I'll quit
them"
II would il were you. old boy" feelinglv
responded Smithers; "yOu see, the fish in
order TO improve the brain, must have some
thing to work on. They can't create the
And then smith said that smithers talked
for all the world like his wifc.--OH Cfy B5is-
edrd.
FIRST PHmADELrHGAN-"Tha was a re-
markably beautiful girl you were dancing
with last night. Know hergn
second Philadelphiau-"No; she's a stran-
ger here. l was introduced by the master OF
ceremonies. should like to know something
about her.
First P.-"Couldn't you Gnd out where she
belOngsW
second P.-No; tried to ascertain that.
! but she was extremely reeDrvcd. evaded social
| subjects, seemed inclined TO discuss science
| and art and said something abDut the nrofn-
| plAsm OF the
First P.-"Protoplasm! That settles it.
She's from Boston. '-Boston Courier.
SIX WAS A Observation-Disclosures TO appl
cant for servicei-"llow many nights out
week.
Applcant-"None, mum. Ui niver sthir
out !"
Mstrsss-"winy you have any friends to see
Apploant--"Nat wan, mum. OF have no
friends
Mistress-"W what wages Will you expect9"
Applicant -"Ofll lave that 90 We. mum"
Mistress.''N What kind OF house work are you
Applicant -"Oi'm wilin' 10 wash an airun.
an cook, an schruh, an clane Windys. au'
carry IN coal. aud huld fares" Here "a loud
ringing was hoard AZ tho door, and the keeper
of Au asylum rushed IN and secured the lu-
natc.l--Ner York Sun.
ALFONSO IupEcuNious JoNEs is a TAT g.
foOter. and up o a receni date thought he had
an sorts of q llen on the McDood estate. Miss
McDOod seemed favorably disposed toward
him, and he was sure that be hNd made good
impression ON the old gentleman. His visits
20 the McDOOd manson are not particularly
angelic IA their few-and-fa botweenness.
The other night little Tommy McD0od eyed
Jones expansive person with an unusual
amount OF interest and then said;
"Bclle, did YOU ever see pas canuonf'
"Cuuuoug Father has no cannon. Tommy.
You're thinking OF his revolver, are you uotY"
"NO, I'm not. I know he has "a cannon
persisted the young McDoOd.
"Well how do you know" laughed Belle
"Why, the other day heard him say that n
Mr.. Jones came around here much more he'd
Ere him out, an guess 10 'ud take cannon
10 do that Washington Hatchsh