Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-07-02

| NlttVHcu YOUTH
Having begun life with strange
disposition to take upon myself the ills
of others, and inding such practice
extremely unpleasant and useless,
have gradually trained myself into the
other extreme, and generally bear the
mlsfortuncs of my friends with phil
oSOphical indifference that is very
composing. On this occasion, how
ever, forgot my cynicsm and found
myself running under that broiling
sun, shaking my fist, with my heart in
my mouth, at the conductor, and de.
manding in the most authoritative
manner that he stop the train.
From the depot to the tunnel was
about half mile; to accomplish this
distance the train and idiot occupied
some 20 minutes, The passengers,
crowded at windows and on the plat
forms, took us lively an interest in the
affair as the entire population OF Glen
Cove that accompanied the train an d
backed the idiot. 1t was gOdscnd to
the passengers, and they expressed
their satisfaction by the llyclicst bet
ting and cheers, first for the locomotive
and then for its strange competitor.
1t was neck and neck between life
and the locomotive. A false step, n
stumble, aud the huge mass of roaring.
throbbing iron would have zone crush
ing over the frail body of the man, who
so strangely impcdcd It's progress.
And such result was imminent; for the
poor fellow, exhausted by excitement
and ovcrcNcrliOn, staggered at times,
and at times rcclCd rs il about to fall,
IN = way TO make me Shuddcr
That such would probably have been
the result became painfully apparent,
when IN abrupt and somewhat uncX-
pcctrd termination was put 10 the
cruel sport. The man stationed at
the mouth of the tunnel and employed
TO keep its murkey depths clear of OBJ
Struclons, suddenly seized the youth,
at the risk Of his own life, and threw
him with some violence TO one SIDE.
Such was the effort that both rolled
over, and the huge locomotive. giving
a shriIl scream Of triumph, divcd into
the tunnel, followed by the long train,
that disappeared rs il the earth had
opened and swallowed it.
| sat down at the mouth of the sub
tcrranean excavation quite exhausted
rs the crowd dispersed, and from the
mouth of the dark entrance was pleased
to find a cool damp air that came out
IN puils, as if u dragon were cOlcd up
within and painted ont its cold, clam
my breath. asked the old watchman
Il series Of IDLE questions, and of II sta
tistlcal sort, such as Il man under The
circumstances always INDUCES in. lie
grunlcd out the exact length of the
tunnel, the time required to construct
II, the accidents that occurred within
his remembrance, and altogether, in
response TO my leading questions, cX-
hlbitcd a good deal OF information on
tunnels, For man to know one
thing well is Il power. 1t is better,
however, to believe YOU know some
one thing and impart the information
TO your friends, 1t is bore at best
and just as well when it takes the
shape OF tunnel.
Having excused the hole in the
grOund-nnd really, come TO think of
1t, there was nothing in it tt spoke of
the late race.
"Crazy iackass" quoth the scntcn-
tiouS guardian of the excavation; he'll
git killed yet, and sooner the better
for all consarned"
why, do they often put him up to
thatPn
"No, not frequently. They do it on
that train sometimes, for they hate the
conductor. Onct, long ago, it wasn't
needed. He used to run ahead of
every train, clear through the tunnel,
a warnin' people Off They switched
that out nv him. Now the ornary
cusSeS puts him up to ii.
"Quecr sort of ofinsanity."
'Isn't it7 and he was onct bright
feller-a ralc schollard.n
"Indccd?n
Eyes, was onct, but left his senses
in this tunnel v
'Why, how was that?'
"Wcll, YOU see, he's the son of old |
Judge Conrad, of these parts-only |
child, at that-and was sent to college, |
and no end of trouble taken and |
money spent TO finish and furnish up
his intcllcctS. When he como home |
to study law, what does he do but take
after little girl named Mary Grubbs,
la ter OF the cooper, an she was poor
as Il pig an purity us apantod wagon.
Well; guess she was about the hand
'omest crittcr in this part of the vine
yard, Len Conrad was struck, | tell
you, after Polly, as we called her. an
don't wonder; for her hair was as
soft and light as silk on early corn, an
she had the handSOmcst teeth, an the
biggest, wonderfullcst dark eyes, an
m angeliferous skin. But neither she
nor her old coopCrin' dad had cent,
50 the Conrads, bcin' toploftical ma
nogany high parties, just shut down
On her.
"rhc old, old story"
al don't know cf its so old. Per- APPS
you've hcerd it aforc, an can save
my wind"
81 mean that the course of true love
never does run SMOOTH
"Oh! that's it, is it?"
mo oilense, old man. But proceed
with your yarn and toll me how Len
Conrad left his senses in the tunnel"
That's what | was comm to
when you put in your chin music.
When Len found the family was for
inst the courtn' he took to meetin'
Ter unbeknOwnst. That was found
,ut, and then it was decreed that Len
hould be sent to Yourope. The
,yenin' upon Lens departure he meets
lis girl, av course, an they meander-
ID naterly little too late, an under.
ook to make a short cut TO the cooper
Iouse through the tunnel. / saw the
loves go in. She was leanin' on his
houlder weepin, an he looked as if
led lost his mother-in.law."
"Mother-in-lawm
THAT'S a little joke o. mine, mis-.
er. Imean he looked like canned
uneral. | warned 'em not to try the
unnel, for il was close on to the time
or the lightning express. But they
idn't heed OF hear me-jos' kept on
n. After they had left got that on
asy took my lanter an run arter
,m. Jes' as l come in sight the in.
ernal thing came roarin' past Glen
'ove-it don't stopped there-an' [