The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1885-01-10
A Bad Business.

$50 you don't want to canvass any
more for the Life of Andrew Jackson, "
said the proprietor of subscription
agency to young man who had just re-
turned from the country.
"No; I believe not. The work is
uArr. rlAacant and- oil that vet -nrefer
to do something else. Believe I'd
rather dig bitches or clean out wells"
"Was your trip to the country sue
cessful ?"
"Well, no, 1 can't say that it was.
I'll give you sample of my experience.
One afternoon, while riding along a
country road, came upon a field in
which an old fellow was blowing. I
waited until he got to the end of the
row, and then, approaching him, I
asked ifhe would not like to look at the
Life of Andrew Jackson.
"W'y, I looked at one O. his lives
luther day. Must have had more lives
than cat Stranger, I'd like powerful
well to look at it, but the fact is, l amt
got the time. This cotton is nightly
in the grass. Whoa, Ball come around !"
"My friend," said I, eff you would
like to look at the book, I'll plow while
you sit down and examine it." This
pleased him very much, and taking the
book, he climbed the fence, went into
the woods and sat down in the shade.
1 plowed for SUMO time, until g. -
but, thinking that the old fellow would
soon make his appearance, continued to
plow on. At last | went into the woods
and found him deeply interested in the
| book"
"It's too late for you to go much
furder tonight" said he, $50 you'd
better stay all night at my house"
'I agreed, for houses in that section
of country were far apart. Well, when
we went to the house the old fellow
took my book and devoted himself to it
the entire evening. l knew that he
would buy it, for l could see that he
was deeply interested. The next morn
ing just before got ready to start,
turned to my host and said:
"Have you made up your mind to
buy that book7"
ssNo, but 1 did low to buy it but
thar amt no use'n buyin' it now."
"Why?"
cease I sot up last night an read her
through"
"That so? Well, in consideration of
the fact that I have stayed all night
with you, I'll make you present of the
book"
"Much obliged to you."
"Not at all. Well, must be going.
"Hold on. You hain't paid me yit
I charge you dollar an half fur you
nights lodgin."
eyes sir, and he made me pay it, re
gardless of the fact that had presented
him with the book. No, l don't carr
to engage further in the book business.
B@@Jim Webster has quite a larg
family. Reverend Aminabab Bledso
was called on to baptize the latest arri
val. Old Uncle Nose was the godfather
and, we regret to say, had been drink
ing.
s.Dat ar infant pears ter me to b
bigger den usual in your family" sai'
the clergyman, peering through hi
spectacles.
"For a new bawn chile hits whop
per-" observed Uncle Nose.
"Foah God, Uncle Nose, you has d
coon OBJ yeah befoah las in yer arms
Dat niggah has done been baptized tw'
yeahs ago." said the astonished parent
BG~She had just returned fror
school, and papa was stroking her hal
fondly. "I hope, my DEAR" said tn
old man, "that you hav'nt acquire
any of that vulgar slang which SO man
young ladies are said to use." "Yo
bet hav'nt, papa" she replied, bright
ly. "When anybody catches me tall
ing slang he is cordially invited to slu
me in the seventh rib" "That
| right my daughter; never indulge
slang. 1t gives young lady dea
, away"