Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1885-05-23


corning events.
Before his goatship had spent three
minutes in the garden, he had managed
to make himself perfectly at home,
pulled down the clothes line. and de-
YOUR, Il two lace collars, pair of I'M
dersleevea, and a striped stocking be-
longing to Mrs. Burdock, and was
busiiy engaged sampling one of Bur-
docks shirts, when the servant girl
came rushing out with a basket OF
clothes to hang up.
4The saints preserve usl7 she ex-
claimed, coming to dead halt, and
gazing open motlthed at the goat, who
WAS calmly munching away at the
shirt
~Shew, shew, shew, there p screamed
the girl. setting down the basket,
taking her skirts in both hands, and
shaking them violently towards the
intruder.
Then the goat, who evidently con-
sidered her movements in the light OF
challenge, suddenly dropped his
wicked old head, and darted at her
With the force vi an Erie locomotive;
and Just one minute later by the city
hall clock that girl tumbled a back
summersalt over the clothes basket,
and Was crawling away on her hands
and knees in search oil IL place To die,
accompanied by the goat, who was
butting her every third second.
1t is very likely he would have kept
on hutiing her for the next two weeks,
If Mrs. Brudock, who had been wit
ness to the unfortunate affair. had not
armed herself with the family poker
and hurried to the rescue.
"Merciful goodness, Annie do get
up ON your feetl" she exclaimed, AIM
ing blow at the beasts head, and
missing ii by few Of the shortest
kind oil inches. Ii was not repeated
owing. to the goat suddenly rising on
his hind feet, waltzing towards her,
and striking her in the small OF the
back, hard enough to loosen her finger
nails, and destroy her faitilin the bless
cd Immortality.
When Mrs Burdoek returned to her
consciousness, she crawled out from
behind the grindstone where she had
been tossed, and made for the house;
stopping only once, when the goat
came after, and butted her head first
in the grape drbor.
Once inside the house, the door was
locked, and the unfortunates sought
the solitude of their own rooms, and
such comfort as they could exact from
rubbing and growing; while the goat
wandered around the garden like
Satan in the Book uf Job, seeking what
he might devour; and the eleven Bob
olink boys fairly Rugged themselves
with pleasure over the performance.
By the time Burdock returned home
that evening, and learned all the par
siculars from his arnIca-soaked wife,
the goat had eaten nearly all the weeks
washing, hall the grapevine and one
side out of the clothes basket.
why in thunder didn't you putirim
out, and not leave him there to destroy
everything ?" demanded he angri.y.
because he wouldn't 20, and / was
not going to stay there 10 be killed;
that's Why answered his wife excited
ly.
"Wouldn1 fiddlesticksp he exclaimed
as he came into the garden, and caught
sight OF the shaggy and highly per-
TUNED visitor.
The goat then bitoff another mouth
ful OF the basket, and regarded him
with a mischievous twinkle of his eye.
You won't 90, hey?" exclaimed
Burdock, trying to kick hole in the
enemy's ribs. III show you wheth-"
The sentence WAS left unfinished, as
the goat dropped his head just then ON
Burdock's shirt-bosom; and before he
could recover his equilibrium, he had
been butted seven times in seven fresh
spots. and was down ON his knees, and
crawling around in very undignitied
manner, to the horror OF the family
and the infinite glee of the eleven
young Bobolinks next door.
@Look out he don't hurt you r'screal-
ed Mrs. Burdock as the goat sent him /
into sandpile.
When Burdock hal got his bald
head out of the sand, he was mud all
over his clothes, and tried to catch the |
brute by the horns, but desisted after
he had lost two front teeth and then |
rolled in the mud.
don't make living show of your |
self before the neighbors| advised his
wife.
"Come III, pa, and let him be-" beg
ged his daughter.
"Golly, dad, look out he is coming
agin = shouted his son enthusiastically. |
Mr. Burdock waxed profaine, and
swore three story Oaths in such rapid
that his family held their
breaths; and Il pious old lady, who
lived in Il house in the rear, shut up
her windows and sent out the cook for
Il policeman or Il missionary.
"Run for it, dad. :" advisid the son
moment later, when the goats atten-
ton seemed to be turned away.
Burdock sprang TO his feet, and fol
lowed his ofspringis suggestion. He
was Logging it in superb style, and the
chances OF his reaching the house
seemed excellent, when the fragrant
brute suddenly clapped on more steam,
gained rapidly, and, darting between
his legs, cs,psized him into the ash-hox
His family dragged him inside,
another candidate for rubbing with
amica and blessed haven of rest.
The back of the house has been
sealed and Burdock now
proposes extending an invitation to
militia regiment to come down and
practice craftsmanship off the roof.
to furnish live goat for
target. and silver napkin ring as the
first prize.