Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1885-06-19
A YOUTHS TRIALS.
In which an Armchair and Two
Girls Play the Leading Roles.
MemnhiS Avalanche

Memphis Avalanche.
A citizen of this city has two pretty
daughters, Last winter in some way
Mr.. FlaKen curls made their acquaint-
ance. No one realizsd whatan expen-
sive acqUaintanceship this was except
the prominent but not wealthy citizen.
ORDINARILY he burned but one fire dur
ing the winter, as the coal dealers want
little less than the earth for the
wherewithal to make fire. Well, to
come back to the subject. Mr.. Fax
en- curls used to sit up with the young
ladies out On Union street about six
times week and once ON Sunday.
The young ladies were each and in
dlvidually smitten with him in
desultory kind of way. But Flaxey
did not come up to their expectations
in short he did not wish to solve
the connundrum how two could be
won. His fancy was equally divided
between the two sisters, first dangling
on to the eldest girls apron string
and then giving his allegiance to the
other. This soon tired the young
ladies, so they came to the conclusion
that he did not mean biz They went
to work last Friday and went into a
committee of the whole TO devise ways
and means whereby they might give
Curly the shake.
This was difficult matter, as you
could hit the young man with a brick
house and he would not take hint.
At last mutual friend of both parties
gave the girls clue to work on, and
that was this curly>haIred youths
modesty. He was actually so bashful
that if one of his chums spoke to him
suddenly the youths face wosld be-
come the color of newspaper mans
nose. Consulting with their mother,
the young ladies hit upon a plan
When the youth called that evening
at 7:44, as he had done precisely for
seven months and FIVE days. he was
shown into the parlor precisely as he
had been for seven months and five
days. He enscorned himself in an
arm chair, spread out his fest, and
sticking his thumbs in the armholes
of his vest, sat a perfect picture of
conplacency.
The door opened and the young
ladies stood before him. Advancing,
each young lady picked out a separate
knee. and there sat with their fair
arms surrounding his neck to the
youths utter astonishment. His feel>
ings, those of bashful man, can
scarcely be realized, and to add to his
horror an omineus step was heard in
the hallway, and before ne could free
hi nself from under the pile of muslin
and laces, to all appearance irate
mother stood before him, and in no
gentle words ordered the double deal
ing young man from the room and
house. When the door had closed on
his faxen ringlets the mother and
daughters all had good laugh over
the young mans misfortunes. Now,
Curley belonged to.a Doto Poke club,
which the young ladies sometimes at
tended; so they, with a rash disregard
for honor, let the cat out of the bag
and related the history of that Friday
night. The boys got hold of it and
made the poor youths life burden
to him. At last the wretched young
man determined on committing sui
eide. With that end in view he went
down on the levee to take leap into
the seething waters of the river, but
as he was now such a hater of the
waole female race he would not let
any Miss conquer him, so he walked
back up the bluff. He could stand
the badlnage and ralllery no longer,
so he saw his ma, took the train, and
by this time is in the fair city Of Mo
bile, out of recch of all raillery and
nirth