davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
That Poem by TcnnysOn.
Toronto Grip

lprbniD Oilp.
You. YOU! how have you failed to under
stand
How all this tall talk sounds Sd very small:
How on you tails the laugh OF all the land.
MOuthpiece OF Jmgoes ait.
You, whom We deemed SO great
This poet--auihOr OF the ~ We're de We're.
The Grand Old Gardener lis u really he
Who sneers At votes with such superior
air,
Fumibg DER lancied inericency
! the fieet-a lingo prate-
Who pictures England's mob. with hob
matted shoes
Kicking nom place the one NAN of the
realm.
Because. for love OF them. he darss refuse
RaslIly In blood their dearest To oerwhelin,
While yet remains gate
Where Honor may walk through with head
uplift.
Why is 1t "you. "you." "you" can't UNI
derstand
The strength OF such calm power. which
cannot drift.
Tho storms on every hand
May rage and fret:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
STONE ~ TIE BLADDER URIC ACID
DESTROYED BY THE ACTION OF
TIE WATER. BY MEANS or
SOLUTION OR Dis
INFORMATION

CASE or DIR. h. j. WRESTLING, MfDDLEfOWN,
PA: STATED Ky HIMSELF.
Experience In It's use I'm Stone ofHe Butt
der in my own person enables me To attest
the efficacy OF the Buffalo Lithia Water IN
this painful maady. After having been
long subjected to sufferings, the intensity ot
which cannot be described. | have under the
influence OF this water passed an ounce OF
Cdiculi Uric dcid), some of which weighed
asmuch as four grains, arfordng ncxpressi-
bile relief and leaving me IN a condition OF
CON parative ease and comfort.
ION one occasion ! passed thlrty-f1ve
CalciiH IN forty-eight hours. The appear
anee OF this Calculus Nuclei indicates un-
misfakably, ! think, tnat they were all
comp Onent particles Of Oqe large Calculus, de-
strOgcd JV he action NJ The WGtcr Jy means
Of solution and disiRteqT0ti0n. AT my adj
vanced period Of life / am seventy-seyen
years and six months OF age, and IN my
feeble general health, surgical operation
was not to- he thought OF, and the water
seems TO have accomplished all that snch
an operation, II successful. could have done.
Besides greatly Increasing the quantity or
the urine, this water erertS % dectdsd thIta-
ence on lis chemical constitution. rendering it
rapidly neutral, II previously dctd. and after
wards alkaline from being htgh-cOtore6 II
becomes pate and having deposted coptoas-
IN Il becomes ihtpid and transparent
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
4 SNAKE IN A RAILWAY CAR.
Passengers Scnt Flying at sight OF seven.
Toot Ophidian.

A Charlotte IN. Co. special says: 4
genuine sensation was created on Wash
pgton-bound passengCr-car Thursday.
COmmissioner-oi- Agriculture Butler, of
South Carolina, secured a seven-foOt
coachwhip snake which he decided to
present to the National Department Of
Agriculture. The coachwhip being
non-vcnomous reptile, Mr.. Butler car
ried it in bag. On the train for Wash
ington he met several friends and con-
scented TO show them his prize.
Going to his seat he reached down
and drew forth the bag, around which
he carefully felt with one hand until he
grasped the snakes head. There were
about twenty passengers watching the
proceedings. One negro. more curious
than his iellow-travellerS, moved up to
get better view just as Mr.. Butler,
having grasped the snakes head, jerked
the bag away from it, and seven feet Of
snake began coiling and squirming
about the car. The snake coiled its
body in all manner of forms. and
whipped its tail around in the fashion
peculiar 10 its variety.
YellS followed, and jumping from
their seats the thoroughly frightened
passengers went tumbling down the
aisle and out on to the platform. The
curious negro lodged, but not in time
to escape a cut from the snakes tail.
and with muttered prayer he bolted
out of the car-window feet foremost,
catching the window-facing as he
jumped. He held on until brakeman
drew him back into the car.
The snake meanwhile had coiled in
numerous folds around the arm-rest
and legs of a car seat, and Mr.. Butler,
unable to release his hold upon its
head, found it impossible TO unwind the
creature without help. The passengers
wanted to kill it, but Buffers friends
came to his aid. and after time the
snake was unwound and safely replaced
in The bag. From the time Of this in
cident until the train reached Charlotte
Butler. his friends, and the snake had
the second-clsss car all to themselves.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
DARNES'S HOTEL, HAMPTON,

ID vA.-OPEN ALL THE YEAR.-CA.
PACITY. 100 GUESTS.--This popular hotel
has been thoroughly renovated for the sea-
son. and every effort has been made TO
make it pleasant. inviting resort. Fine
fishing. boating. and bathing. telegraph
Office and post-ofice I'm the hotel. Prices:
81 and 81. so per day, sl2 per week. and $40
ppr month te 9-2m
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
CAxpEIs. mATriNGs. &c.
GORGE ". ANDERSON 4 SONS,
1904 MAIN STREET.

CARPETS - Wilton. Moquette, Brussels,
Tapestry. Three-Ply, lngrains, Cotton
Chains. Rag, List. and Hemps. Genuine
Turkey, andthe handsome limitations OF
smyrna Rugs.
The cheapest and best selection OF MAT
TINGS probably ever in thisc city from
l2lqc. up: - -
LACE CURTAINS and UPHOLSTERY
GOODS, with Cornices or Poles made TO
III any bay or other shaped window;
OIL-CLOTIIS, LINOLEUMS, COkriCINl,
LIGNUM, and the different grades Of
COCOA and NAPIER MATING fof
floors and stairs;
Every kind OF PAPER-HASGlNGS for wall
and ceiling decorations, from the cheap
paper at loo. per roll 10 the ella orate and
handsome limitations OF leathsS:
WINDOW -SHAD ES and AWNINGS made
in every shape and style;
And general assortment OF HOUSEHOLD
UPHOLSTERY GOODS In price and
quality not to be surpassed. sp29-3m
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

HOBB.S ISLAND - REUPENED
~ FOR THE RECEPTION or visi rDRs.
SPLENDID BATHING. FISHING, AND
sNIpE-s HOOrfNG. Passengers FOR C.nn
Isja nd will take the cape Charles. n daily
steamer, frora Norfolk. VI 10 A. NJ, OF WON
old pni;,t a. ic.l0 A. Nc. Passengers VIII
buy tickefs on stea mer 10 cherifor station.
where backs for seaside viii meet them.
Terms. Per day, 81: per week VIZ; per
mouth. $40. Address -
Bay View r. o., Cobbs Island, VA
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
A LLEGHANY SPRINGS, VA,
now THE
LARGEST, MOST POPULAR. AND Fash.
ONABIE RESORT IN VIRGINIA.
will he open for the reception OF guests on
the
FIRST DAY OF JUNE.

The accomriods tions are FIRST CLASS, AZ.
eording every comfort for both invalid snd
peasurc-seeker.
The hotel is commodious and supplied
with every requisite improvement, inc!uu'
ing post, Telegraph. and express Offices.
billiard saloon. hot. cold. and shower bathA-
Fine driving. roads and beautiful walls
extend In all directions aud the surround
ing scenery is not equalled by any Watering
place In Virginia.
A good livery is attached to the estab-
lishment.
A fipe Brass and String Band OF Music
has been engaged.
Pamphlets containing a full desert ption
OF the Springs with certificates OF some "
the remarkable cures OF dyspepsia aud
other chronic diseases, will he furnished on
application to PURCELL. LADD AGO.
Richmond. Va. or
&. A. CALHOUN
General Manager, Allegheny springs, Va.
my l2-2m
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
STONE IN The BLADDER (PH0s-
PHATICl.
CASE STATED BY DIR. d. :. HARDY, HooB
FEToN, GREEN COUNTY, Nc.

CASE STATED BY DIR. d. :. HARDY. HOOK
EEToS. GREEN COUNTY. y.
My son. q young man. suffered from
efo,te IN the Bladder, Of n mired character,
consisting chiefly OF Calcium, Carbonate.
and Phosphate. After persistent use OF all
remedies indicated in the case without
benefit, | put him upon Buffalo Lstnla
Water, Spring No. 2. the use or which for
some six weeks resulted In the passage, at
short intervals, OF Grarei OF small size. and
at times OF particles OF Sand. followed some
time afterwards by the discharge ola stone
weighing twelve grains (the largest, am
confident, ever knew 10 pass through the
Urethrn). virtually ending his troubles
aimee which time any unpleasant symptom
has been relieved by the use OF the water
for short Tins. Its action In this case has
been indeed wonderful Ie5-f&sn3w
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
URIC ACID CALCULI.

CASE OF DR.. J. ID. EuGLEsIONl
Hsmpden sidney, Va, member Medica
Society OF Virginia; stated by himself.
The action Ot.the Buffalo Lithia Water
IN the sO-called Uric acid Didthssts IS espe-
cially happy.
Il mad a very gratifying experience ia a
case OF Calcun in the Bladder. OF Uric Acid
variety. i'm my own person: between Feb
rusry L ana May l.. lssl, had thirty at
lacks OF great severity, passing IN each one
OF them number OF Calculi. aggregating
1875. Finding no permanent benefit from
any treatment OF the profession. made n
visit to the Buifalo Lithia Springs. The
happy adaptation OF this water 10 my CON-
dition was soon evident. and It's use for a
few weeks arrested the CdieUtns formation
and resulted in my entire relief, which |
nave reason 10 hope Is permanent, as more
than year has elapsed since there mas been
any manifestation OF the trouble"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
YURNIrURE, CARPETS. STOVES, As.
SIOUR.
I'll y U R.
n BEST"

Ask youi grocer for CHRISTIAN BRO
TIERS 4 CO.'S .BEsT"-Highest Grade
Spring Wheat Patent made. Relatively
the cheapest Flour. Sixty pounds more
bread per barrel than winter-wheat fiour.
For sale To the trade only oy
X. LEWIS, l2i0 Cary street.
Je lo-tAu27 Agent for State Of Virginia.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
HAMILTON HOUSE,
IL STAMFORD, CONN.

A First-Class Family Hotel. overlooking
Long Island Sound. Every room opens on
a wide piazza. Beautiful Viewsand Drives
Sea- Bathing. Boating, &C. Situation re-
nowned for health. Terms reasonable.
Circulars of A. X. MAThES,
my 3l-Su.SThst Proprietor.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
Bay View r. o., CoDD . isN
~, a a. Otf,,.
NREENw0oD HOTEL. us MILE,

GREENWOOD HOTEL. II5 MILES
~ west OF Richmond. Ia the Blue. Ridge
Mountains. on, the Chesapeake anu ohio
railroad.
Excellent ohslybeate and pure freestone
water upon the grounds.
New management. Newly painted ana
thoroughly renovated.
Terms liberal. Address
e7-17t Mrs. j.. MUNDAf.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
NOW OPEN,
~ BLUE RIDGE SPRINGS. VA.
Its acknowledged success as a
SUNNI ER RESORT
hos nlacad tt I'm the front rank OF

SUMMER RESORT
has placed 10 I'm the front rank OF
MOUNTAIN RETREATS,
and the highest voucher for the value OF this
remark can be- found I'm the fact that for ten
successive summers many Of Its patrons
have engaged the same rooms, sat at the
same table, and been attended by the same
servants. until BOio they regard IL as their
SUMNER HOME.
The additional attractions for this season
are the enlargement Of the Ball Room To
double its former capacity.
An elegant turnout" for pleasant affer-
noon drives. and the unsurpassed horseback
ride TO Wildcat Knob.
pond well stocked with carp. and the
mountains abound with squirrels.
All the amusements usually found at @
trst-ClaSs summer resort.
Pamphlets at the drugstores or Purcell,
Ladd 4 Co. aud Polk Miller & Co.
PHIL. +. BROWN,
my Slim owner and Proprietor.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
HUGUENOT SPRINGS.

This popular summer resort win be open
omy, this sum mer resort II second 70 none
In the State. With large, airy rooms. beau
tiful shady grove o. thirty acre.. ios.h0Qno
full OF ice, plenty Of fresh milk and butter
and yeFe'soiss ni.s9 on the place. one eea
for lees than II costs 10 remain Ia the city,
Special terms % families. For further u.
". J. MCDOWELL
Owner and Manager
corner Seventh aud Main 61ves(A
jeu WehmsaA Va
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
BOARDING.

NEW YORK B0ARD.-PARTlES
~ visiting New York will ind FIRST
CLASS BOARD and ELEGANTLY-FUR-
NISHED ROOMS at As east twentieth
street between Madison and Union
Squares. Dining room on porlor noor.
First-class attendance. 10 DIV
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

Prizes to the value Of seventy
guineas have been offered for designs
for Irish lace at a competition to be
held at the South Kensington Museum
during the month of July.
The moss crop Of Florida is said to
be worth more than the cotton crop,
and it can be placed on the market at
less expense. The demand exceeds
the supply, and there is not county
in the State in which the product is not
going to waste.
In 1850 their were only Is cotton
Seed-oil mills in the United States, hav-
ing an aggregate capital Of 50, 800 300,
using materials valued at s5,09l. 25l,
and turning out products valued at
g., 600. 92l. At the present time there
are over 1870 cOtton-seed-oil mill cont
panies in the South. representing an in
vestment of sll.5S0, 900.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
Hartford POST

Hartford POSI-
Wasn't that a splendid hit? There
now, why don't he rum"
"Why. my dear, that was foul
ball"
"Well. I'd run. anyhow"
"But the umpire wouldn't let you"
"0f course not. The umpire is all
the time yelling and running about and
interfering with the game. If it wasn't
for him baseball would be quite in
tcreSting.'
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
ORKNEY SPRINGS,

ORKNEY SPRINGS,
~ SHENANDOAH COUNTY. VA,
will be open for the reception OF visitors
nom JUNE lsT TO DECEMBER lSr.
Greatest variety Of medicinal waters OF
any summer resort in the United states.
Table unexceiled, bedrooms large and
airy. hot. cold, shower. and plunge baths,
first.class livery at low rates. magnin-
cent roads. beautiful scenery good fishing
and game in Immediate vicinity.
Descriptive pamphlets, containing ruii in-
formation. can be- obtained free OF Purcell,
Ladd d Co.. Owens q Minor Polk Miller a
Co. ThornbuFy Il Ramos l.. Wagner. H.
Blair Jesse Child. r. Dupuy, and Dispdtch
office.
Parties leaving Richmond ria the Chesa-
peake and ohio road make close connection
at stanton with the Baltimore and Ouio
railroad for the springs.
II. CABEI.L MADDUX,
nv 3.3m Proprietor.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
nnUsn. MEDsrfH -. q g
v A Mt ii INE,
PROFESSOR HERT's GREAT GERMAN HAIR
RESTORATIVE.
THE BEST PREPARATION FOR THE
HAIR now KNOWN

For everything for which hair-touic Is
required IL has no equal. The highest tes-
timonals of its merits are given:
From Rev. W. W. BENNETT. n. d.. Presi-
dent OF Randolph Macon College
| tried the XANTHINE. and found IL 10
be all IL claims In restoring the hair To It's
natural color and removing dandruH.
W. ". BENNETT.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
OCEAN-yIEw HOTEL. OCEAN

"a
~ VIEW VA, situated on the beach
near Cape Henry. and twenty minutes
ride by IA ilroad from Norfolk, Va; in full
view OF the ocean. over a fine grass lawn
extending TO the beach. Handsomely fur-
nished, electric bells, aud everything first-
class. Fishing and bathing not surpassed
on the Atlantic coast. Eight trains To and
from Norfolk daily. The undersigned as
sures the public that Ocean View viii be
kept first-class In every particular, and
every possible effort viii be made 10 add
continually to the com fort OF guests. Hoard:
81. so per day: sl4 10 sl6 per week; So To
s55 per month. Letters or kilograms To w.
l.. BROOKE Manager Ocean View, Va,
will receive prompt attention. Boats and
Fishing Tackle. with good attendants. al
ways on hQnd; also. Billiard-Sa loon and
Bowling. Alleys for amusements Of visitors.
Handsome Dancing Pavilion and Brass
and String Band Of Music engaged for the
season. W. l.. BROOKE.
ie lf-zW Manager
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

beautiful WOMEN.-LADIES,
IL inclose 10 cents stamps for particulars
testimonials, etc. I'm sealed letter by return
mail, of ELEGANT TOILET REQUISITES.
How to beautify and adorn the COM
pleNiOn. remove wrinkles. backheads.
freckles tan. and peck marks ADIpO-
MALENE develops the bust. NOn.iniu-
rious! CORPUS-LEAN reduces super
fuous flesh ten TO fifteen pounds "a month.
No poison. LEUKO-LENTINE cures all
female complaints. Name paper and men
ton the article wanted.
CHICHESTER CHEMICAL CO.,
Madison square, Philadelphia. Pa.
ia I4.pOSuOGt
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
EBBITTS HOUSE,

EBBiTT' HOUSE.
~ CAPE MAY. y. j.,
Jackson street. opposite New Columbia.
One minute walk from Beach
Finest location. Large, airy rooms. cle-
CAVITY furnished. Electric bells. first-ciass
In every respect.
Refer by permission. TO Mr.. 3. y. Hicks.
10 J1-eodiAt = W. COLT.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

DENNYR0YAL .-ClIl-
L CHESTER'S ENGLISH the original
and only genuine. Safe and reliable. Be-
ware of worthless limitations. lndspenss-
BILE To ladies. Ask your druggist for -" CHI
CHESTEkS ENGLISH and take no
other. or inclose four cents (stamps) to VS.
for particulars in letter by return mail.
Name paper. CHlCH ESTER CHEMICAL
co, 23l3 Madison square, Philadelphia.
Pa. At druggists. Trade supplied by
Thornbury Il Ramos. lie 1854 Su&Tuly
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

II affords me pleasure in stating that
have seen all the beneficial effects produced
by your preparation. XANrHlNE. which
IL claims 10 plish-removing dan
druii promoting the growth ~ the hair,
restoring it 10 its original coloT-and with
out any deleteriOus effects IL IL Tar supe-
riOr To anything OF the kind | have ever
seen A. \. JAMES.
Price. 81 per bottle. Send for circulars.
Address NANrHINE COMPANY.
- Q.Tu F&Su9t &w2t Richmond. Va.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14
old POINT COMFORT, VA.

Easy-riding vehicles meet all passenger
trains at Goshen depot.
Rates: 81 per day, SO per week. SIS per
month. Special rates for families spending
the season.
send for circulars giving full analysis OF
water and other information.
IL. a. G0ODIOE n son,
Proprieton.
l.. Il. FLASsAGAS. NJ. H., resident physi.
clan, Cold sulphur Springs. Goshen Bridge
ost-office, Va. my 23.tm
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

From Rev. A. A. JAMES. pastor OF the Pres
byterian church at Jonesville, >. C.l
NAY 1873
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

The pature OF the TRANSACTIONS oil
these gentlemen now is about like this
The broker calls upon the merchant at
his Office in prison in the morning,
comes away with hatful Of the latter's
notes, which he offers to the bank on
the "uSual discount days, Tuesdays
and Fridays" The bank purchases
them at low rate OF interest. the
check is paid over to the broker, who
hands il TO the merchant, less a COM
mission (which is divided with the bank
president). The merchant in turn re-
ceiyes this money for his notes and inn
mediately deposits it in the bank, so
that the bank, as is usual in such cases,
eats the gingerbread and keeps it at the
same time.
1t is easy for businessman Of ordi-
nary intelligence to see that this ar
rangement can be repeated for an inde-
finite extent TO the great and endless
profit Of all concerned. Visible signs
Of wealth begin to crop out in the APP
pearanse Of these gentlemen already.
A GOLDEN OUTLOOK THROUGH THE
BARS.
In Difference to the feelings Of their
fellow-prisoners, some Of whom might
be jealous, they do not drive out to the
park in their carriages oftener than
twice a week accompanied, of course,
by the warden), and their dress is not
much more gorgeous than is consistent
with good taste and all things consid-
cred. But there can be no doubt that
unless their career is cut short by the
discharge Of one or more Of their num-
Der the time will soon arrive when
they will be able to purchase the prison
in which they are lodged. warden and
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-06-14

THE WHITE SULPHUR SPRINGS,
i GREENBRIER COUNTY, w. VA,
THE MOST CELEBRATED or ALL The
MOUNTAIN RESORrS.
and one OF the
OLDEST AND MOST POPULAR OF
AMERICAN WATERING PLACES.
viii open for the season JUNE 1sr. Geva-
ton above tidewater, 1900 feet; surround
ing mountsina. $500 feet send eog AN.
my s-2m b. r. EAKI.E. superintendent.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-01-15
The "Shakemakers" Of the Sierras.

Living just above the foothills and in
the midst of the virgin pine forest ofthe
Sierras are a class of industrious peo-
pie little known to the world. They live
an isolated, happy life farfrom the busy
world, of which they know little and
care less. These are the "shakemak-
ers." They exist usually in couples,
and make their home for the time be-
ing where the finest sugar pine grows,
and whence the products of their labors
can be evidently hauled away. They
are jolly. happy lot. these 'shakemak-
srs' of the Sierras. They work at will.
and by way of recreation divide their
leisure time between deer and bear
bunting and the nearest country store.
The mode of making 'shakes" or clap
boards is simple. The tree felled is
sawed into suitable lengths, and then
is split into thin boards or shakes" by
means of a froe and mallet The shakes
sell here in the mountains at S4. so per
1000. and are always in demand. A
,hakemakers' camp is one of the most
picturesque scenes to be found on the
coast, and the voluntary recluses who
,peDd year after year in these mountain
iolitudes are the jolliest lot Of bachelors
On earth. A majority Of this almost
unknown race of men are old miners
and young men from the foot-hill farms.
Wild, brave, uneducated and kind
hearted, they include within their num-
bers hundreds of the best frontierSmen
md the noblest types Of manhood
Letter IN San Francisco Examiner.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-01-15
A Dudes Discontinue.

Among the disadvantages of tho po-
sition of prima donna of light opera
are the innumerable missives from mas
culine admirers, sometimes tender and
apologize, but often grossly imperti-
nent- Last evening, despite the watch
full care of the stage doorkeeper at Hav-
erly's Theater. a note was delivered to
the lady who was singing the title role.
1t read as follows.
my Dear Miss: have seen your
charming impersonation and am desi-
rous of becoming acquainted with you.
and for that purpose invite you to sup
with me after the performance. l am
aware that l have more cheek than
brains. but l have plenty of money and
am New Yorker. shall be seated in
sixth row left. third seat from the CEN
ter aisle. If you accept my invitation.
when you come forward for your solo
in the second act please wink with your
right eye. will have carriage at the
stage door."
Amused. in spite of her vexation, at
the insufferable cool impertinence Of
the letter, the lady exhibited it to va
rious members of the company. 1t was
resolved that the conceited New Yorker
should be punished, and is an open a
manner as possible. So when the cur
tain rose on the second act and the
whole company was on the stage, the
actor who should be the first to speak
walked deliberately to the footlights
with the letter in his hand and, putting
on his eyeglasses, begal to count. in a
manner which attracted the attention
of the entire audience, until he singled
out the New Yorker, who was begin
ming to squirm under such close scru-
tiny. He then removed his glasses and,
after once more glancing at the letter,
slowly and solemnly winked his right
eye and pointed over his shoulder tow
ard the back door. The audience by
this time began to suspect the position
of affairs, and all eyes were fixed upon
the sixth row. Then another actor
stepped to the front and, in the same
manner, winked and pointed over his
shoulder, while the unlucky dude
seemed trying to shrink out of sight be-
hind his neighbors. But the end was
not yet, for. as though at q concerted
signal, the entire company, principals
and chorus. fastened their gaze upon
the now thoroughly uncomfortable
young man, and each deliberately
winked their right eye. This was too
much for his dudeship and, rising in his
seat. he beat q hasty and inglorious re-
treat amid shouts Of laughter.-Phila-
deLyhia Press