The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1885-10-17
Church ChOirs Criticised.

Church ChOirs Criticised.
Poor, despised, harassed, tyrannized,
umppreciated church choirs! Poor
singers! you never get any comforting
words from the music loving congrega-
tion ! There is always some fault to
find; either the organ is too squeaky,
organist too fast, bassos too loud, tenors
out of time, sopranos too low, altos fall
setto.
But twas ever thus from time i'm.
memorial; truly the poor singers get no
credit for tramping through the winters
snow and melting through the summer
heat. But let them take brief holiday
and you often hear one say, "Pity the
choir can't stay home and tend to their
business" We read some time ago of
an organist who resigned after sixty
years service. Poor fellow! wonder if
he kept journal of all those years, how
many changes occurred, how many spats
took place. You may ask if members
of church choirs ever spat? All! yes!
every phase of life must have some spice
in it.
All the world over may hear of trou-
BILE in the choir. Did you ever hear the
story of choir in one of the large
cities where the paid singers spatted
about washing dishes7 Strange COM
mingling of the sublime and ridiculous
To think of fine vocalist being requir-
ed to perform such task7 The story
runs thus: These ladies living in an ad-
joining city could not have time to 60
home to dinner, but took lunch in
somebody's room; it was customary for
some one to wash the dishes. One
Sabbath fracas occurred, one said it
was not her turn, another thought that
it made her hands too soft. After war
of words some left for good, a few re-
turned to church and sang "God be
merciful unto us sinners"
+ Oh! the hardships of church choir
When we were fourteen we thought we
we're somebody when we sang solo,
| $50 low you could not hear it,) and
how often have we pumped the bellows
| Just for fun. When we moved on to
the sunny side of thirty, one morn the
choir was non est, and we were grabbed
like a hot cake. The church was spa
cious one with lofty arches where sim
gle voice would soar up and never come
down again; the hymns averaged six
stanzas apiece, and after service some
one feelingly remarked: "Did you ever
hear such horrid singing2" All, we'll |!
we always could bear the taunts of an
unappreciative world.
Pity the SORROWS of church choir |!
come with me into church gallery on
a broiling day in July. The leader has
her bonnet strings flying, the mezzo-
soprano has just discovered her bran
new collar lying fiat and starchless; an
other has taken off her jewelry and hung
up her gloves on the book rack; the
racn wish they could take or rneir coats,
while the poor little bellows blower
vigorously slaps his handkerchief across
his perspiring sable brow. There is not
breath of air; the great organ takes
up so much room; the windows are SO
small, and altogether it is not near so
pleasant as "Cool Siloam's Shady Rill. "
And yet the singing must be all we'll
done, or you hear the listeners down
stairs exclaim: "It is hot enough to-
day without such squalling." How lit
tie it seems in creature who does not
understand music to call harmonious
discord" under the common phrase
"The choir goes one way and the organ
another" And how seldom is line
music appreciated. Why we know OF a
soloist who rendered charming selec-
ton one Sabbath morn, and a noted
critic remarked: "Pity she couldn't
sing something religious" not knowing
that it was the sweetest of all Bible
verses, "Come unto me and rest all ye
weary and heavy laden"
| A magnificent 6ass0 brgtHna0, after
executing fine solo, was amazed tc
| hear the minister read the lesson, be-
ginning thus: "And when the uproal
ceased" An irate old deacon who hao
been trying to close his ears, with {
grin turned towards the gallery with
look which plainly said: elbow do yol
like that Mr.. Basso?"
And yet while we know there are
sorrows and prosecutions always beset
ting church choir, while there are
many amusing incidents always trans
piring, yet there are pleasant memories
lingering around.
We stood to-day in an old church be
fore an old organ; it bears the dat'
1896; it is old, tottering, and has lons
since lost its pedals. 1t has but ont
bank of keys, but few stops, and oft
times key drops into space-and yet
with all this, it is stately, grand ant
imposing, because of its ancient archi
lecture. Who knows what memorie
cluster around it? Who knows wha
master hands have swept the keys
, hands that have long since been folde'
in deaths embrace. And who know
how many choirs have sung their dulce
strains to the accompaniment of this oil
instrument. If the old landmarks coul
speak what record it would be. Ou
pen should be dipped in rhapsody t
weave tale of an old church choir.
But pity the sorrows of choir; ten
der your warmest sympathy to the pool
tired singers; don't heap opprobior
remarks upon the poor volunteers, bt
y cheer the weary heart and speak hndl
of those who do the best they can.
When you find a church choir tn;
pleases nine -tenths of the congregatio
q you may know that the millennium
at hand.