The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1885-10-15

Arnica & OIL Liniment is the best
remedy known for stiff joints. For
sale at Barber's Drug store. Oct.
The Bulwark Of Health is blood. II
this be impure and runs sluggisbly
through the system, health must be
undermined sooner or later. The
'nost perfect renovator that the pa
tient ever yet has tried is VINEGAR
BITTERs. 1t carries off all Impurities
snriches the life-giviDg fluid, restores
health and vigor, ami is a boon to
suffering humanity.
Middleburgh witnessed one OF the
worst objects Of depravity last week
that can be found i'm years travel.
1t was an old beggar woman, ragged,
hlthy and foul,nouthed in the extreme.
She drank whiskey, smoked and
chewed tobacco until her foul ston.
ach rebelled against her hogish appe
tite and she voinited like any other
brute. We don't know where she
came from or where she went to-
only 80 she don't come back any
more.
The supplemental Arbor Day, fixed
by DIR. Higbee, Superintendent OF
public instruction, for October %, is
intended for the benefit of those dis.
tricts which failed to observe the day
appointed last spring. In many dis
tricts the schools had closed, in Others
the weather was so incement that
nothing was done, and In some the
interest was not aroused until too
late. All these, as well as any Others
that may incline That why, can take
part in the observance OF the supple
mental day.
Wehave received from the publish.
ers handsome little book relating to
tue new Marriage License law. This
book should be in the hands of every
minister, justice Of the peace, Clerk OF
the Orphans court, as well as those
contemplating marriage, rs they will
then know what questions they will
be required to answer when they ap-
pear before the clerk OF the court.
Send % cents to Il. & J. w. johnson
& Co, 535 Chestnut Street, Philadel
phia, and get IA copy OF the book.
Now, why Is It that the stovepipc
will not, under any circumstances,
unite az It was united when taken
down and so carefully woodshedded
last Mayf II was carefully laid away
nobody touched it since, every joint
and elbow is there, yet, when called
upon to I'LL its former place, the ell
bows are peryerse, the joints won't
telescope, the whole concern has he.
come shorter, it slips from your hands,
falls slantingly on the carpet Just be.
yond where the temporary news
paper protection extends, dinges it.
self out OF shape, bounces aud comes
down on the other end with similar
result, each end emptying out more
SCOT than you could possibly drum
out Of 1t with the potato masher, and
all the corrosive scales that you
couldn't move with that prosaic in
strunlent-O, Is 1t any wonder that
the meekest mans bosom becomes
stuffed with unfortunate expressions
too solid and decided to be uttered
audibly. This condition OF perversity
In inanimate matter can only be no
counted for satisfactorily In one way,
videlicet There is a "really" devil
land during his sumgIer vacation, he
visits all the wood sheds for tho sole
purpose Of tenpering with the stove
pipe, hoping to get ia his work upol
the owners when they vainly attempt
to fit the thing together in October.
Therefore, it would be we'll to bear
this In mind whilst engaged In that
occupation, curb your wrath, sing
selections from Watts, and thus
fool the fellow with horns, hoofs and
queue placed much too low upon his
anatomy.-Le,cisburg Chronicle.