The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-04-21
ABEGINNER'S TRIBULATIONS
The First Days Experience of the New
Man at the Stamp Window.
The Many Abstruse Mathematical Calcula-
tions with Which He Found Himself Con-
fr0nted and How He Solved Them.

Yesterday was not phenomenally warm day
for the season. At least it was not noticed as
being particularly warm outside the stamp win
dow of the Indianapolis postofice, so those who
had business with the new stamp clerk were
astonished at the tiuency with which he per-
spired. The ooze began early in the morning,
when it was discovered first thing, that the COM
bnation of the safe had eluded the treacherous
memory to which it had been intrusted, and no
stamps could be got from the repository with
which to begin business. After considerable
painful thinking happy thought obtruded-bor-
row! Emissaries were sent out and kindly dis
posed drug stores and other business houses
furnished generous supply and business began.
1t is no easy matter to count out stamps, lick
them onto letters and make change 1t looks
easy from the outside-that's one of the reasons
the new clerk is now inside-but when you are
asked to give fifty cents worth of stamps in
ones, twos and fives, thirty nine cents worth OF
two cent stamps and to make all sorts of odd
combinations and return accurate change, it
would at times strain the arithmetical genius
Of lightning calculator. People were crowded
about the window like they gather round cir
Gus ticket-wagon, and the throng was diminished
very slowly. But they were, for the most part,
patient.
The crowd was finally accounted for. Early
in the day it seems the new stamp dispenser had
not from any philanthropic motive it is be-
lieved-chanced to give two dollars worth of
stamps for one dollar, and the crowd had come
and continued to gather under the impression
that the administration was closing out the old
stock at reduction sort of bankrupt bust
ness 90 per cent off for cash.
This rumor abroad on the streets finally
crawled into the postmasters room, where he
was receiving the congratulations of his friends
on his grand opening, his beaming countenance
illustrating his great inward delight. A chalky
pallor overspread his face at this untoward It'd
ings and minutelater Mr. Jones, the postmaster
himself in propria persona was in the stamp
department to aid the perspiring clerk. 1t was
a truly inspiring spectacle to see the good
man bringing his experience of over thirty
years ago, acquired in the Columbus postofice,
to the aid of the new clerk, and business for
time, though it may have proceeded little more
slowly than before, certainly went forward with
the most charming accuracy, as Mr.. Jones and
the stamp clerk, on piece of blotting paper,
had figured out how many two-cent stamps
and the proper coin returned in change to the
purchaser. Thus the stamp clerk not only had
Mr.. Jones's assistance in making the needed
arithmetical calculation, but was nerved by the
moral support Of that gentleman For For
benign assistance, Rev. Oliver Hazard
Perry Abbott-for such is the name of the
new stamp clerk-might triumph over the
throng outside and have clear window for
moment, to be able to say as his great name
sake on Lake Erie remarked on a trying occa
sion, 1--WE have met the enemy and they are
ours" But the lull was only temporary. Hos
| tilites were resumed with greater activity and
| even Mr. Jones, with his Columbus experience
| was compelled to acknowledge defeat.
| In the mean time some business folks who were
really limited as to time, and could not spend
| more than brief half hour or so at the window,
wandered off and bought stamps at the news
| paper Offices and elsewhere, and one man was
| Postmaster Jones and his herculean efforts "Ob,
| hi, this is place for a man i'll a hurry' then
| leaving with unbecoming haste.
The money order business was better dis
patched, but there was a painful drag in the
| registered letter department In fact. the only
| posting of mail. Owing to the orifces provid-
! ed by previous administrations, of which the
| patrons of the Office freely availed themselves,
| there was no trouble to get letter paper
into the office. The hole there and, the let
| ter started, it went in naturally duck
| drops into pond
| There was considerable sympathy expressed
! for the perspiring stamp clerk, who was recog-
nized as the fervent minister of the gospel who
| gave vent, during the Democratic convention,
| last fall to that devout ejaculation, God bless
the Democratic party" and it is understood that
| a subscription will be undertaken by some liber-
| ally disposed citizens to have a motto painted
with those glowing words upon it ard hang it
above his window
| Yes, it was warm day for the stamp clerk.
And the morning and the evening were the first
| day.