Morning journal and courier., 1885-12-23
WICkE ED.

The Pittsburg Commercial Gazette says "There is more wickedness on foot. The ed itor of the Leader has lost his horse.'' X contemporary asks whether William A Wheeler is dead alive. Not dead, W, think, but gone behind.-New York Graphic
 A lady says that gelatine rubbed into silk dress will take out grease spots. To re move the gelatine, take pair of scissors anG cut it out.-California Maverick.
 A Misleading Odor-First Student Center ing companions room): "Ah, I see you have been burning midnight oil" Second Stu dent: "No; that's a couple of old shoes threw into the stove. "-Tidbits.
 Mr. Roe complains that somebody has put his name to story that he did not write Gore will not be shed, however, until some body puts one of MT. Roe's stories to the name of somebody else.-Norristown Her. sld
 A Student of the Dime Novel-''Come, now, Bertie, kiss your little sister and make up with her, :" said mamma to her ten year old boy. "What! the Pawnse chief bow low to pale-face Cry Baby! Mother, you ask too much "-Tidbits
 Dairy Hint.-A French agricultural col lege experiment is claimed to have demon strated that giving COWS water at 66 degrees increased the milk yield one-third. How would it do to make the water 132 degrees and so make the yield two-thirds greaters- Lowell Courier.
 An exchange speaks of young lady ''whose head was turned by over-study.' 3 Thousands of young women have their ''heads turned' every day by showy bon net in the window of 8 millinery store, but the operation is not painful, we believe.- Norristown Herald.
 Fogg-"I can let you into a good thing, deacon if you care to put up a few hun dred" Deacon Jones-'sThank you, Mir Fogg; but do you think it would be consist ent in man of my profession to gamble upon future contingenciess' Fogg-"Cer- is religion but speculating in futures!' Deacon-'*How convincing you always are, MT. Fogg! Well, yes; don't care if do go into this, just little "-Boston Tran script.
 The San Francisco girl of 1885 is princi- pally remarkable for her ability to express htesse5f tfoR If wjhh deaps baa eetien esmbiRa a clever trick of economizlng time and space by running two or three words together. She fs1i Fnsiish fails her she instantly resorts to words of her own coinage. The T. 0. offers as an example the following intercept ed conversation: ''Lo Whereyergoin'f '''Io! Sus downear to the dressmaker's. :" ''Dressfnisht?" ''Mm-mm. Not quite; 'sgOlntube lovely. do"snlnltthlllb: "0h, I dunno; little jiggers down the front and pleatsinsroun the botton-sorter sprang- ly effect Musturry-goodby!'- Fran cisco Newsletter.
 A four year old boy, while making morn ing call at the house of Eeighbor, overheard the servant girl talking emphatically to the cat in her endeavor to get il out of the kitch- en. Among other things the girl said to the eat was this: "If you don't get out of this I'll shake the liver out of you!' This remark struck the listening youngster favorably, and he treasured it up for future use. Next morning he chanced to be at the same neigh bor's, and the smaller members of the house hold announced to him that they were going to have liver for breakfast. The youngsteI put two and two together at once, and reach ed his own conclusions; then, to confirm them, he turned to the girl and asked anx- iously: ''Did you shake it out of the cat:'' St. Albans Messenger.