davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
STOVES IN HOLLAND.


The stoves here are curiosity, although
there are q few of German and French
manufacture in use that are more modern
in model. The real Holland stove consists
of cast iron pot, with hole in the bottom
in which sits loose CRATE, and so loose is
it that woe be unto firemaker that pokes
too strongly. Even good draught is apt
to upset the whole business into the ash
pan. The fire pot sets in box of sheet
iron, with hole in the side to admit the
pipe to the pot and. Zone in the front for
draught. They are not provided with any.
thing like q damper.I Irhe expensive kind
are made fine with much open work, of cast
iron; others have top of marble, white,
gray or black, while the most expensive are
encased in tiles of old Delft. 1t is unneoes-
sary to say those stoves, "kachels they
are called, give very little heat, SO little, in
fact, that people of all classes use sort OF
heater similar, think, to the kind our
grandmothers used to carry to church with
them, consisting of wooden box or foot
stool lined with zinc or brass, the top well
perforated inside is On earthen pot filed
with turf or charcoal, which has been first
burned of in the kitchen fire. Ladies'
making calls here in the winter are at once
supplied with such "stove."
The kitchen stove is on the same plan as
the others, only the sheet iron box is larger
to give more space on top, which has many
different sized holes, each with sheet iron
cover, to which is rivited long handle,
giving 1t strange appearance. There is
only one place on these kachels" where
anything will boil, that being directly over
The fire. If more than enc kind of yegeta.
bles are to be prepared for dinner they must
take their turn over the fire and then be set
back to keep warm. The oven is practical
ly of no use as there is no way of heating
the sides or bottom.
The stoves most used for sleeping rooms
here are also novelty, or rather an antiqui
ty, for they probably date back to Jobs
time, requiring more than his patience to
run one They resemble cast iron hitch.
ing post, being straight cylinder not quite
four feet high and from five to seven inches
in diameter, with flange on the bottom
that answers for feet and movable cap on
top. For the inside arrangement or fire
pot there is a pail with cover and bail
CRATE sitting on ring, which ring is fasten-
ed half way down. The lower half answers
for ON ash pan and has also small hole for
draught. With each "post comes two of
these pals. Coke, not coal, is used for
fuel. The fire is always built either in the
kitchen or yard, the idea being not to have
any litter from it in the room. First the
coke is put on the CRATE, then charcoal,
afterward turf and few bits of wood, and
then the pail is ready to be carried up stairs
md placed in the stove, lighting tho charge
Of fuel on the top. Like oil things with q
wrong beginning, it seldom goes. The wood,
turf and charcoal being burned out, the
pail must be dumped and started over again,
and still the Hollanders think them so con.
venient"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
working Up In Kansas.


MIR. William Smith removed from Ohio
to Kansas, and entered upon mercantile
life. That is, he opened store to sell dry
goods, groceries, boots and shoes, hardware,
tinware, and oil the other wares known to
earth. Mr.. Smith had cut his eye teeth in
the Buckeye State, apd be did not intend to
lose any of his cutenass in travelling toward
shutdown.
The store was frame building. He first
provided the windows with heavy shutters.
Then he had three OF four sorts of locks put
on the doors. Then he arranged for three
spring guns, each ons of which was SO set
that the robber who got inside would be
shot to pieces in the least possible time and
with the most agonizing pains. As an addi-
tional precaution Mr.. Smith had wires at
tached to doors and windows in such way
as to send an alarm to his house in case
anything was disturbed. Then he bought
bulldog warranted to hear fly walk at
night, and he hired man to sleep in the
store and armed him with two shotguns.
1t would look to man up tree as II
Mr. Smiths general assortment of fall and
winter styles was about as safe from the
ruthless hand of the invader as anything in
this country, but great surprise party was
in store for him. The other morning, when
he went down to business, he found the
front door open and half his stock gone.
His hired man and two shotguns were
sound asleep in the bedroom, and the bull.
dog sat in the sun on the steps, and was too
languid to wag his stump of tail. The
spring guns hadn't sprung, and the alarm
wires dangled in fantastic shapes.
Robbers had crawled under the store and
cut hole through the floor. As this wasn't
the regular way Of breaking into a place,
the dog didn't object, and the hired man
didn't want to leave his dreams to raise
row.
Mr.. Smith doesn't know any more about
The dark ages, drift period, or the mound
builders than he did before that robbery,
but he has gained considerable insight into
architecture. He has discovered that people
are not SO very particular whether they en-.
ter a store by the front door, q rear win.
dow, or by way of the lower floor He is
hopping mad, and has offered reward,
and he wants somebody caught and lynch.
ed, but he shouldn't fly of the handle in
that fashion. There are several works on
architecture which he can procure Of any
respectable newsdealer, and any one Of
them will give him valuable hints on under
pinning and how to compound II.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
nIysreriaus Iolse..

A joke is mystery to some people. In 0
certain court in this State on a time the pro.
ceedings were delayed by the failure OF a
witness named Sarah Mony to arrive. After
waiting long time for Sarah the court con.
cluded to wait no longer, and, wishing to
crack his little joke remarked, "This court
will adjourn without Sarah-mony." Every
body laughed except one man, who sat in
solemn meditation for five minutes, and
then burst into hearty guifaw, exclaiming,
see it! see It'll" When he went home
he tried to tell the joke to his wife. "There
was witness named Mary Mony who didn't
come" eaid he, "and so the court said.
Wen adjourn without Mary-Mony.'" 81
don't see any point to that" said his wife.
" / know it," said he, 81 didn't at first; ;
but you will in about five minutes. -
Leaoist0n (Me.) Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
The Art of shndowIng.

"Shadowing," says Chicago detective,
" is the most difficult and the most scientific
work in my profession. II man is well
shadowod for two weeks so much can be
discovered concerning his habits, his asso-
ciates, his inclinations, his secret acts, in
short, of his inner life, that almost perfect
biography of him can be written. Every
nsan does many characteristic things when
he thinks he is alone that he never would
do in company, and the shadow learns O
mans true character by witnessing his nat
ural life. More people thnn you imagine
have been Swallowed for the information Of
both friends and enemies. Many curious,
and sometimes suspicious, wives have their
husbands Swallowed, and many husband
hos locked mp in his Office desk n mirror of
his wife's private life in the form of a shad-
ow's report. Nearly every man in Chicago
prominent in business, politics, or religion
has been Swallowed, and there is somewhere
filed away n document that would make the
eyes of the subject open could he read it.
Every man connected with bank, from
the President down, is Swallowed. Large
business firms get periodical reports on the
private lives of trusted employees. l sup
pose Marshall Field can tell any of the
heads of departments in his store whether
they drink brandy or mead, smoke cigarettes
or opium, play penny-ante in a friends par
lor or faro in gambling house.
~ know that the head of q well-known
detective agency in Chicago has been shad.
owed by nearly every other agency, and
hey all have his record.
II is hard work to shadow man. You
have TO get up an hour earlier than he does
in order to get your breakfast and lay for
him ut his home. You follow him to his
office, to lunch, on his business rounds
everywhere. When he is on the street you
never take your eyes off him, and tell you
this makes your head swim. You follow
him home to supper, and down town again
in the evening. You note everybody he
speaks with and every lady to whom he
bows You must stay with him till he goes
to bed, and then write out your report be-
iore you get to sleep.
" Men are oftenest Shadowed when they
are in trouble and they rush here and there,
talk to ocores Of men, enter scores of places,
and get up early and go TO bed late. A good
lively subject will lead the shadow q wild
and merry dance, and two weeks Of 1t will
wear good man out. Chicago Ne,cs.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
POETRY.
wosd-Notes From \ Cnro.

SNoou~SOke& FROM n CNNCs
What-what-what there, my pet canaryf
What are you trying, my town-bred bird?
You, whose performance used never to yaryi
All, can guess at the rogue you've heard
Day after day, in your bright brass dwelling,
You lived In comfort; you took your dip;
Your cup ran over with seeds for Smelling;
Your dear delight was a celery-tip.
Primly and trinity you sleeked your feathers;
To swing in the ring you considered bliss;
And you sang, sang, sang in all seasons anC
weathers,
With swelling throat, such a song as this:
"sweet, sweet, sweet,
Seeds-to-eat
Swee-eet?
st-hear-me-trill like rill, rill, rill, rilll
Sweet, sweet, sweetln
But away at the farmhouse last July, sir,
Don't know who In the dawn and dew,
Came, like flame, to the branch near by, sir,
Flashing, and dashing, and haunting your
Who but the oriole, orange and sable?
Brilliant Lord Baltimore, velvety-necked
whistling out clear, through the morn's gay
babel
Something to this provoking effect:
"You're Gagged see IT is MT fair, but don't
carei
Pm free, free, free! Ohio, it's rare, and don't
carem
"Freegn-You listened, and learned ais mean
ingi
Shadow and meadow and breezy tree
Cherry and berry, Hitting and cleaning
Mating and building
"oh, free, free, freeln
And now you repeat, though a trlle queerls.
That nonchalant melody, DER and DER
And persuade yourself-or so very nearly
You are quite as content as you wers before:
IT is MT fair, but don't carei
II don't care ~
Helen Gray Cone, in Sc Nicholas.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
THE USE OF PERFUMES.
How Young Ladies' EmbroIdcr Their In.
itiais for Gentlemen.

For the past two Isummers an animated
discussion has been going on in society as
to the propriety Of the use of perfumes.
The anti-perfumers practically carried the
day until last year, when several Of their
fair opponents succeeded in creating re-
versal of opinion, 30 TO speak. The correct
thing now is for o lady to have special
perfume of her own. Some accomplish
this by q combination Of perfumes, and
very few have sought professional aid from
the outside and purchased secrets which
they zealously guard. Perfume should
never DO used upon tho handkerchief OF
course, this will not interfere with the fow-
er trade. Many OF the bellies in society
wear but one kind of flower, aud seek to
thus indiyidualize It. 1t is rather pretty
custom and gives the young men ample OPP
portunities Of knowing what their lady
friends wear in the line of floral decora-
tons.
The latest, the newest, the most agoniz.
ing, the most excruciating and the most
fascinating thing out, according to the au-
thority Of young man whose life Is but an
endless round of fashionable dissipation, is
the silk handkerchief quilt craze. "Now,
my dear fellow, you mustn't laugh, you
know. Really 1t isn't fair until you know
oil about il. II isn't any relation to the
crazy quilt craze, which belongs solely TO
the ladies. All we have to do with that,
you know, is to supply pieces of our cravats
to our lady friends. But this is something
for men. You'll appreciate IT, know you
will. Well, I'll tell you oil about IL. You
see in the first place buy number OF
plain white silk handkerchiefs. Then dis
tribute them among my lady friends, one
to each. The lady is expected to embroider
her initials or monogram in her own hair in
the corner. Could anything be more beau
tiful? The idea came from abroad but II
has taken immensely here. You see the
lady who has long, luxuriant hair has a
chance to deftly show the fact, while the
girl who hasn't-well, I suppose she either
buys or borrows some Of the same shade as
her own. Only the short-haired girls are
fighting the craze. I'm with the long
hairs In the contest because it's tho proper
thing, you know."--N. =. Telegram.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
no Bridal Couples.

The local papers report that twenty bridal
couples visited the White House last Satur-
day. A hotel clerk said to me this morn
ing: 81 never saw.~such q crop Of fall
chickens as there is this year. There are
not less than hundred couples in this city
to-day who are stopping OF the hotels, and
Lord knows how many more are doing up
the honeymoon at the boarding houses and
the residences of their friends. am sur.
prised," said he," sat one thing more than
any other, and that is the number Of old
grooms and young brides who seem to have
been placed in the market this Fall. From
Kentucky and Virginia the average bride
groom seems to run up into forty or forty
Ave years, while his wife will not be more
than twenty-five. think 1t is on account
Of the fact that after the war the young fel
lows in the South were not able to double
up, and now that they see brighter political
prospects ahead they are making venture,
although not quite so young as they used
to be. There was rather peculiar incident
here yesterday. An old gentleman with
two ladies stood in the lobby when two of
our regular guests approached my desk.
One said to the other, What pretty daugh-
tiers that old gentleman has, Daughters
said the gentleman addressed, why they
are not his daughters. One is his wife and
tho other is his mother-in-law.' Mother.
in-lawl How do you make that out !? was
the reply. That can't be possible oh,
yes, IL is; and very easily demonstrated too.
You see the blonde one married the father
Of the brunette. That makes her the bru-
uette's stepmother. Then the blondes hus-
band died and soon afterwards this old gen.
sleman married her stepdaughter. / think
Il had been in the old mans place would
have married the mother-in-law instead Of
the daughter. ~ Washington Cor. Boston
2rGusller.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
UNCLE SAM BEATS THE RECORD.
Millions of Dollars Worth Of Agricultural
Machinery Sent TO Other Countries.

We beat the world ON mowers and
reapers," says an official Of the Bureau Of
Agriculture. This department has finish
I'd compilation of figures on the exports
Of farming machinery from this country.
Before 1864 agricultural implements had no
designation as such in our statistical reports
They were simply included in other classes
Of manufactured articles, and not until 1870
was there division of these implements so
that we can know just what was exported.
But from 1870 to 1884, inclusive, we sent
to other countries over 1886, 500, 900 Of agri-
cultural machinery, and of this nearly one
half consisted of mowers and reapers.
Great Britain has patronized our manufac.
turers of these machines to the amount OF
over $5, 900, 900 in the past fifteen years
Germany, over $4,000 O0 Australia, over
81, 900, 600; France, nearly $4,000, 900 ;
the Argentine Republic, over 1000, 900,
and the British possessions in North
America, over 100000. Our exports Of
agricultural implements jumped up from q
little over 5000, 600 in 1864 to over 81 ,000,-
900 in 1870, and to nearly $4,000, 900 in
1884.
"There is significance in the figures,
aside from the general interest which will
be felt in this evidence Of appreciation Of
Yankee ingenuity. Wherever this labor.
,aving machinery goes there will be increase
IN the crops and saving in the cost Of theii
production and harvest. ALI of this has Q
very important bearing on the future Of
agricultural production. The greatest de.
mand for our implements comes from the
new colonies where the population is in,
creasng most rapidly. Last year the AGO..
600, 900 people of China bought only $7s
worth of agricultural implements from thil
country while tho 100000 Chilians tool
from US $S4,195. The general use of THU
improved machinery in new countries in
sures its use in their development--wher
their agriculture will constitute large per
centage Of the agriculture of the globe
This is subject for American farmers Il
think about"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25

All steel articles can be perfectly preserv-
ed from rust by putting lump of freshly
burnt lime in the drawer or case in which
they are kept. If things are to be moved
Gas gun in its case, for instance), put the
lime in muslin bag. This is especially
valuable for specimens Of iron when frac-
tured for in moderately dry place the
lime will not want any renewing for many
years, as it is capable Of absorbing large
quantity of moisture. Articles in use
should be placed in box nearly filed with
thoroughly pulverized Stacked lime. Be.
fore using them rub well with wooler
CLOTH
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
SHE WAS ENGAGED.
The Dinlcuity of Getting Female Teachers
In Washington Territory.

The scarcity of young women in Yakima
county, W. T., has not only caused consid.
cradle ill-feeling among the manageable
young men, but is certainly proving an OBJ.
Stacle to education. just as soon as young
lady is installed as teacher of school,
scores of young fellows, upon matrimony
intent, vie with each other to act as her
escort to her boarding house and it occa-
Bionally happens that one of them will dem,
onstrate his right to act as her gay cavalier
by knocking ont !" the others should they
persist in their attentions to the new
teacher.
Two or three weeks courtship, under
such circumstances, is usually enough to
convince young lady that " q school taGch-
er's life is not happy one,n and that of o
wife is far preferable. Then the primitive
university is shut up until new teacher is
found, and the youngsters, having no les.
sons to learn, devote their entire time to
pleasure, and are as happy as the young
husband who stole away their teacher.
A member of the school committee, who
had been empowered to secure teacher
for q school temporarily closed because the
former incumbent had been persuaded to
desert her pupils in the manner described
above, had introduced decidedly original
resolution in the School Board. 1t was to
the effect that no lady shall hereafter be
engaged unless she signs paper declaring
that she will not get married until yeai
has expired after the tim, of her installa
lion as teacher" This, 1t was thought
would prove a settler to the young men who
were ever on the alert to cause the deser.
ton of tho teachers from their posts Of
duty.
Mr.. Beebe, the author of the resolution,
after much correspondence, engaged lady
to oificiate as teacher. She came from a
distance, and he went to the railroad station
to meet her. There, for the first time, he
delicaiely sounded her regarding her will
ingness to sign document promising to
continue single for year. She emphati-
,ally refused, and declared that rather than
agree to such an ultimatum she would re-
turn. Mr.. Beebe saw that she was in earn
est. She was not only intelligent but pref
sy and amiaLle, therefore he did not want
to lose her; and on the spot, notwithstand-
ing the resolution, he engaged her-to mar
nv him Chicago Ledger.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
His Home il His Castle.

In every community the peddler, the
book agent and the insurance agent, as well
as the ubiquitous gamin, should be taught,
severely, if necessary, that doorsteps and
door bells are not public property and
should not be used except by thel.owners'
consent and approval. No special cranks,
vulgar persons, children or others should
be allowed to violate these rules Of our door
steps. Here as we'll rs in London the law
should he on the side Of the house and not
on the side of those who invade the rights
Of human homes. PHILADELPHIA Times.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
A Delightful Commission.

Young Mr.. Smythe was passionately en-
amored of Miss Browne, and was squirm-
ing in his chair preparatory to proposal
when the young lady said: "Mr. Smythe,
you pass Mr.. Thinplate, the jewellers on
your way home, do you not ?" Yes" he
Said, huskily. "Well, would you mind
doing me little favor?" "Mind deal
Miss Browne" he replied, with look oil
unutterable reproach you have but Il
name II" Thanksl VIII you kindly
ask Mr.. Thinplate if he has frightened the
setting Of my engagement ring which MIR.
George Simpson left with him yesterday q
--Harper's Bazaar.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
There Was nm Opening.

~ have called to consult you," he said,
as he entered tho lawyers Office, Sin refer
ence to my son. He is studying law, and
1 thought would drop in and ask If you
knew of any opening for him." Oh, yes.r
I'm glad to hear that What is it ?" sTht
door Of the poorhouse."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25
Copying Printed Matter.

Printed matter may be copied on any
paper of an absorbent nature by dampen.
ing the surface with weak solution Of
acetate of iron, and pressing in an ordinary
copying press. Old writing may also be
copied on unsized paper If wet with weak
solution Of sulphate Of iron, mixed with 0
small solution of sugar syrup.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25

During 20 years of suffering from ca
tarrh and catarrhal headache never
found anything to afford lasting relief I'M
til I tried Ely's Cream Balm. have
used two bottles and now consider my ca
tarrh cured. d. T. Higginson, 145 Lake
st., Chicago, I'll: Nov. ll.-4w.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25

Anything in my line not kept in
stock will be obtained at one days notice,
while ! am attending lectures.
Oct. 28.-tf. J. +. GRoMAN'
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1885-11-25

Buy your Hats, Umbrellas, Cabas,
&C., of STAIeER, Masonic Temple, Tren-
ton, j. April29-tf
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1885-06-05

Mt-Nf1
...t,, 70 ,he department 81 arrirultu o
49,, turing The tHo dsc,d from 's5o
+... ,ba value Of meats produfed in tie
p. ...t -,.tes increased from saoooeo 90 f.
-.. s,5a,a. OF corn, from s35o.bsn,s7s %
-...sis a14. Of eheit from Sl2l 631 SIS O.
.... ses leg. Of hay. sI52G5l, los 20 son
...-.4. ofdlirr products from sl52 IS ~
o.. ss1s 000. 00o aud Of other products in
elton. more than doubling the aggr-
.fvUu,. increasing it from SiGon ,Og0,-
q. s. 500 100000 ia round numbers
,r..l GOOD prices the current production ci
4. r.,-.d states cam be little shortof S4uoo,-
.sl ,le values are tho,e Of q homr
t.t. Alta not Of tine eastern commercial
.... n ports 81 expectation. The commits
..- declares that this increase must Dc les
s N future. az there must necessarily be q
..., X the extension Of settlement Of new
,,. mia the farmers should endeavor to
l.o, PRODUCTION TO consumption md e,pe.
.,., mlcivor to supply food products ihat
oon imported to give remuner,tive e.
.,,,ment to agricultural h,hor, and food n
-.-,4f. ard chetpness to consumers.