Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-10-29
Not Likely TO Return.

A tall. smoothly-shaven man walked
into the office of well-known Broad
street broker early yesterday morn
ing. He carried small brown-colcr-
cd bag in his hand and over his arm
hung a fashionably-cut top-coat He
was evidently just from the country,
although his clothes were of recent
city make. No one was in the office
except the office boy, whom he found
sitting in the cushioned chair of the
broker, with his feet on the desk, in
dusiriousiy engaged in smoking a
cigarette. As the visitor appeared at
the door of tho back office the Office
boy glanced at him through cloud of
blue and ill-smelling smoke and ex-
claimed between puffs: Come in,
young Teller, don't be afraid 4"
The visitors face expressed surprise,
but he said nothing.
al suppose, said the Office boy with
ready nonchalance, ''that you've come
in TO see old BROWNE"
well, went on the youth glibly,
che amt in. He's out in the country
on a bender
'On u whatP" asked the visitor.
''On spree. You see he sent the
old girl
The what?" inquired the visitor as
he seated himself in chair.
That's right, make yourself at
home. Have cigar?n rs he opened
Mr.. Browns desk and pulled out box
of Hayanas.
You were speaking of the old girl, ;"
interrupted the visitor, as he declined
the proffered cigar.
"Oh, yes, went on the lad. HE
sent his wife 10 her home in Vermont.
Did you see Mrs. B.? No? Well, she 8
holy corker. She has that duffer
right under her thumb. He had some
friends come down to the city to see
him last spring. They wanted him to
take them around the town and show
EN- the elephant. Old Brown was
afraid to go. He said he'd see about
it. Then he sent me over to his house
with note to Mrs. b. l took it up to
the house. Mrs. B. read it.
'WhatP she said, Mr.. Brown will
have to be away tonight. No, sir.
You toll him l shall expect him home
to dinner He went home to dinner,
too. Well. as l was saying, old Brown
sent Mrs. b. off TO her home and then
started on royal old bender He left
me stack of letters to mail to Mrs.
b. every day to make her think he
was in town attending to his business.
Oh! I'm on to his nibs, | tell you.'
"You seem to know great deal
about your employer" observed the
visitor.
''Well, | should smile. We're all
onto him. The bookkeeper says if he
had such wife he'd commit suicide
Why, would you believe it, he's afraid
to breathe when Mrs. BIS in town.
I'm the junior partner of this firm. Is
there any business | can do for youP
Want to buy any stock? Hello! here
comes the bookkeeper nowr'
AT this moment the boy tossed his
cigarette into the waste-basket, and
took his boots off the desk.
How are your" inquired the book
keeper, as he entered the back room.
II didn't expect You home so soon.
How did you enjoy the seashorep''
"First-rate," replied the visitor.
Il declare, Mr.. Brown continued the
bookkeeper, II would hardly know
you, since you shaved off your whis-
kers Well, Richard, !" he added to the
oflice-boy, Il guess you can go now. "
But he spoke too late. The boy had
already left. He didn't come back,
either. This is the explanation given
by MIR. Brown for card which ap.
appeared in the front window of his
office yesterday afternoon, which read
as follows:
"a quiet, industrious, discreet office.
boy wanted. No idiots need apply"
NJ !. Cor. Syracuse Standard