The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1885-09-19
The Nature of a Mule.

l know that the mule is the only ami
NAL that Noah didn't take into the ark
with him. l looked over the freight
list carefully, and could not see mule
way-billed for any place. So clear
headed man as Noah did not dare to
take one on board, as he knew he would
kick a hole through her in less than
week. don't know a man on whose
head you could pour quicksilver and
run less risk of spilling it than on
Noah's. He was a dreadful level
headed man, and before the freshet was
over everybody on earth realized the
fact. The origin of the mule is envel-
oped in good deal Of mystery. Ira
dition informs us that when the flood
had subsidized and the ark had lain on
Mount Aratrat, Noah was very much
surprised in one of his observations to
find a good healthy mule standing on
the top of an adjoining mountain. The
same tradition informs us that the mule
is the only animal that lived through
the flood; outside the ark The mule
can be considered in great many ways,
though the worst place to consider him
is directly from behind, anywhere with
in radius of ten feet. never consider
a mule from that point unless l am
looking through the flue of boiler.
The mule has one more leg than a
milking stool, and he can stand on one
and wave the other three round In as
many different directions. He has only
three senses-hearing, seeing and SMELL
ing He has no more sense of taste
than stone jug, ann will eat anything
that contains nourishment, and he
doesn't care two cents whether it con-
tains one per cent. or ninety-nine. All
he asks Is to pass him along his plate
with whatever happens to be handy
round the pantry, and he wont go away
and blow how poor the steak is. He
justs eats whatever is set before him
and asks no questions. If l were to
have large picture of innocence to
hang in my parlor and l did not wish
to sit for 1t myself, l should get a cor
rect likeness of a mule. There is in
nocence in mules couutenance to fit
out a Sunday school class. 1t looks as
guileless as an angleworm.
A mule never grows old or dies; once
brought into existence he continues on
forever. The original mule is now
alive somewhere in the south and is
named Bob Toombs, because he is stub
born. Mules are chiefly found in the
south and west. They have been more
abused than Judas Iscariot. a boy who
would not throw a stone at a mule when
he gets chance would be considered
by his parents too mean to raise. The
mule is a good worker, but he cannot be
depended upon. He is liable to strike,
and when he strikes human calculation
fails to find any rule by which to reckon
when he will so to work again. 1t is
useless to pound, for he will stand more
beating than a sitting-room carpet. He
has been known to stand eleven days in
one spot, apparently thinking of some
thing, and start of again as though
nothing had happened.
To fully appreciate mule one should
listen to his voice. You never can
really know whether you like mule or
not till you hear him sing. | attended
a mule concert at Chickamauga during
the war. The wagon train was in front.
The mules were starved for water. The
gallant Cleiburne was protecting the
rear. Thomas pressed him hard. The
music, or programme, opened with a
soprano solo and then swung into n
duet, and then pranced off into trio,
followed up by a quartet, and ending
with a full chorus of the whole army
train. l didn't hear the whole thing,
for when l came TO, the regimental sur
geon was standing over me, giving me
pONSllu VI ldllNSoi anu Hcalu MN
say that l might possibly get out again,
though l never would be well man
again. / have been in places where it
took nerve to stand-such as falling out
of a three-story window, and having
been Though the New York Exchange
and fpent part of a day in boiler fac
tory, and have been on one or two Sun
day school excursions where the crowd
were all girls-but never knew what
noise was till | heard lot of army
uoulas brav