, 1885-09-13

A.id cs.Ine aud sat upon my knee
You are a poet, " she sad, 4 know,
Aud that Is why love you So
! AN a man, and she a child,
And with ms story she's ~beguiled,
For I'm a dotlng old brother. you see.
And she's y sist 7, sweet to me.
VA Pissch1.
LITTLE LEADERS.
a LOSS of Notwithstanding hash of
good meat.
As much of a pugilist as Sullivan is he
box a compass.
If the Genesta and Puritan can't do
any better they yacht to quit trying.
The president had a Republican for a
guide in the woods. He is not afraid OF
anybody leading him astray.
ANGLo-MANLAc is a misnomer. Anglo
idiotic is a better word to describe Ameri-
cans who affect English ways.
The Anti Prohibitionists of Ohio arc
inconsistent enough to blame DR.. Leonard
for drinking, ever for his health.
A PARAGRAPH says. The very newest
note paper and envelopes are yellow"
They should be another color to be easily
read.
SINCE Sullivan couldn't find anybody
else who could black his eyes, he has gone
into tho burnt cork business and will do it
himself.
NOAH WEBSTER was the master of
many languages, but there was one tongue
he could never overcome; that was a
woman =.
"DELIRIuM SHERMANs, is the new
name for the application superinduced by
handling the rudy old rag known as the
bloody shirt.
JOHN A. LOGAN said so many rich
things at the late gathering of the Army
of Tennessee that he made good grammar
ashamed of itself.
IT is said that Kelley will resign. He
has been refused acceptance in so many
places, perhaps they will refuse TO accept
his resignation.
Dr.. DELANEY, a French physician,
says hat it is best to lie op the right side.
Same people think it best t. lie on the
side that pays the most.
BUTLER admits that he has no inHu-
ence with the administration, and this is
more OF a compliment to the administra-
ton than Butler thinks it is.
SAM JONES says, Next to a pretty
oma | love a fast horse" Most men
next to a pretty woman love to be there
themselves, and let the horse go 2 40.
THEODORE THOMAS says that badness
adds dignity and is u natural mark of SUI
perior smartncss. Thomases head is bald
enough Tor anybody to see that il is level.
TENNYsoNi is said to have ready another
volume Of poems. The English people
have just ESCAPED a war, but trouble
seems to be all the time threatening Great
Britain.
THE old notices of the states and ter
ritories have been in use long enough.
The two following are substituted as sanl
pies for new ones: For California, The
Grapevine" for Wyoming. THE Boz
vine. "
SAM JONES says that it he lived in
Chicago he would drink river water in
preference to whisky. Doubtless he'd be
forced 20 do so II he depended on getting
any money out OF religion there. But IN
the abstract Brother Jones shows a de-
PRAYED ia ste if the matter.
IT is said that the Sandwich Islanders,
who formerly had the finest teeth ever
seen, are losing them now, early in life,
by decay. This is another evidence Of
the eternal fitness of things. Those
islanders are not called on nowadays to
eat 30 many tough customers.
A COUPLE of young men disguised in
billed shirts, sercnaded Il couple OF
young ladies early this morning, and the
disguise was so complete that the young
ladies' can never know whs the sereuaden
were unless they write to The LEADER
and get information under the head Of
answers to correspondents"
TnE bloody shirt will answer a holy
purpose now. 1t will send the Republi-
can party to its last account In the face
ofthe fratenal feeling that eyineed itself.
Enthusiastically, in Gen. Gnnt's death and
burial, sectional hate cannot live in this
country, and the ruddy rag is the banner
OF Republicanism and sectional hate.
You should NOT miss the
opportunity 10 see fheNMesf
efn<Lt n(fp4r1Is-sLff ulsoaf