The Oskaloosa herald., 1885-07-09
TYPICAL TOURISTS.
FEATs or THE GLOBE TRoTTERsr
WHO SEE AMERICA
They All Pass Through San Francisoo-
Around the World In Eighty Days
The Mathematical Tourist
and His Daughter.
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The tourist who is most conspicuous
sbout the hotels, depots and wharves OF
San Francisco Is the globe trotter. the
name given TO those who are forever try,
1 ing to outdo the travelling feats OF
Phiness Fogg-with no apparent prospect
of gaining wife or fortune If they succeed.
| All globe tro;ters pass through San Fran
cisco, and IL is the only city they do all
1 pass through This city Is the middle OF
| the hour-glass in the map of the globe
| trotters routes. AS all roads once led 10
| Rome. so now all round-the-world routes
lead, In both directions. 20 san Francisco.
| Whether the globe tFotteT travelling west
after leaving Europe, strikes Aspinwall.
/ New Grlsans ew York, Boston, Oh
| Montreal first. he leaves these shores al
/ San FrancisIn. and II travelling east ht
comes by the way of Hong Kong OF
| Melbourne, he arrives by either route al
| San trancisco The globe trotter, as he
Is seen on our streets, Is distinguished by
| clothes which make the beholder maTve
how clothes can be so creased and
wrinkled. by a helmet or Tam U'ShanteI
head carving, and by a stick cut At his
last stopping place
TtIL WORLD IN EIGHTY DAYS.
The wonderful sameness of this class
makes them unintereSting except for the
astonishing manner in which they manage
to avoid seeing anything. The writer
happened 10 meet two erfectly developed
| specimens on board an Australian steamer
| just as she was leaving the wharf in this
| city.
Il suppose we've seen everything in
| America?" Que of them remarked as the
| Golden Gate was being passed
i suppose so How long were you 10
the country"
We'll. We were detained a day here,
waiting for the English mail for the
steamer, and stopped over two DAYS in
| New lOrk; that makes seven and two
and one ten days | shouldn't like to
have missed anything you know.
Nothing 70 speak OF. Some tourists
take a run up TO Boston and into the
| White mountsins have trip on the Hud.
son and 8 flyer at the Adirondacks; drop
| down into Florida and across to New Or.
leans; stop over day at Niagara and lie
/ OF at { Cleveland and Chicago to have a
look al the great lakes; run up to Denver
TO see a mountain city; branch off for q
run through the Yellowstone region; do
Salt axe and Inspect the Comstock
MINIS; 20 into the Yosemite. and hsve G
look at Los Angeles steam up to Oregon
and visit the DaIles, and"
| ~Oh, / dare say, interrupted the
| globe trotter, quite decent, | dare say,
but scarcely worth fellows time, you
know"
Ii becomes q wonder what induces the
/ globe -trotter To 20 abroad lie could
travel the same number of miles,
/ at much less cost. on the under.
| ground railway in his own London
and profit quite as much in
wisdom and experience But while q Ger.
tain class If English are the very worst and
most senseless tourists, another class are
| the best and most sane tourists to be met
| with, although il must he confessed they
seldom get credit for it. They see more
| of scenery and institutions and much less
| Of the people of the country than an
| American. The average American ia
/ naturally gregarious and will make his
| neighbors acquaintance and talk with
him in a stage coach or railroad car at the
risk of missing half the points of interest
| on the road. The Englishman who trsv-
els 10 see has generally had as much ex-
| perience with men as he cares for The
most loquaCiOus neighbOr on q coach seat
| can not trap him into a sustained cunver.
sation, and he is known to resort hotel
keepers as the man who stays the longest
| and sees the most He is doggedly in.
Il
1 travels with a scarcity of Luggage" that
makes him the wonder and envy of all
bandboX-inticted tourists who view his
belongings.
TdF STATISTICAL TOURIST.
The consideration of typical tourists re
| calls a y pe which Is best deS eloped in the
Yosemite valley the mathematical tour,
| ist This is always 4 man and is war.
| rsnted to drive one mad in less time than
| any other kind of bore. The writer w6s
4 punished for all the sins he ever com
mitted by being one of dinner party re-
| Gently where the mathematical tourist,
/ fresh from the osemite, sat on one side
| and his highly utter daughter on the
| other They were from Chicago, or some
other Of those big fat, boisterous western
1 towns, and when you get hold of a speci-
men of chicago bitterness there is new
| experience in store Thei. remarks alter
mated about as follows:
Now. them Bridal Veil falls Is $40 feet
high and contains at this season of the
year, 1900 miners inches, which, Is
sometimes blown cIar of the rocks. which
would take lifting power in the wind
/ ekal to"
-Ah. the wind! Spirit of the Evil
Wind is the meaning of the Indian name.
II u tuC 1nlS SHOWS
that there is a deep spirituality in the
minds of those untutored children Of"
Wall. sir. in the crack that makes one
'er them royal arches. ca'lated you could
| put q church and steeple and have for"
That hoyal Arch fall seemed like a
slender thread Of cloud, on which heay.
emily messages might be waited to"
An eZ fer them Yosemite falls, why,
the trail TO Union point is half .clumb be-
fore you git ter where the top of Third
fall. 500 feet, is seen, which is only one
sixth of the"
The religious instinct and all love for
light and sweetness must be incrusted
deeply with worldliness In him who can
view unmoyed the awful grandeur Of"
The biggest grain elevator in chicago
could be run by the power goin' ter waste
In them Ne, sdy falls " E..
The forced listeners could not help
wishing that Chicago had heavy export
dutY on tOllFists a..