The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-12-22

lar, ard my hand was upon the Commodore's
scarf, when a million new horrors crowded upon
me. What II some one should come into the
room now2 What il were found bending over
the dying man, my hand at his throat Ny head
began to swim; all presence of mind departed. I
was benumbed in body and in mind. 1t flashed
upon me that | was recognized as an opponent,
If not an enemy. OF Commodore Vanderbilt.
What would men say when it was reported that
ne had met a sudden death and that | alone was
with hlmf Would not the very worst be guessed
and believedl Our financial warfare was widely
known. Would men hesitate to suspect or scru-
pie TO accuse me of murder with all this chain OF
horrible circumstance ~clinging about mel That
ROOM ana Its books, and its pictures. and that
stalwart man dying in his chair went whlrling
round and round in my vision. Host all control
OF myself, gave up the purpose of assistance, and
sank as helpless even as was the gasping victim
stretched out there before me.
II looked again; the gasping was over. the
face was ghastlier than ever; all consciousness
was gone. and-so / felt sure-life was extinct.
A desperate impulse seized me. l reached for
the bell cord and pulled it violently again and
again. but no answer came; it snapped in nv
hands. Then ] jerked the door open and called
loudly below for help. Two servants answered
then. One hurried for a doctor, the other. with
a resolution and a presence of mind that l had
beer unable to command. tore off the shirt-collar
and barred the breast. How 1 sought with that
woman there for some sign, some slightest scrap
of evidence that life was not gone, but it seemed
a hopeless task till the doctor came. The Com
modore then was taken to a bed. and, at the doc
tors suggestion, [ went to a room down stairs to
await news of what the real condition was. !
sat in the dark room below, pursued by devils in
vision after vision, for an hour or more. Then
the doctor came. In my excited state | could
scarcely wait for him to articulate one word after
another, and in my impatience / broke in;
sis he alive2 Will he recover Tell me, tell
me quickp
"'Mr. Vanderbilt is out Of present danger
said the doctor, his calmness in strange contrast
with my wild worriment.
but he continued, of course no more bust
ness can be talked tonight. The Commodore
has lately become subject to attacks such as you
have witnessed tonight, and he will rate it as a
great personal favor if you will please try to for
get what you have seen. and let nobody else
know of it.
What a load these words lifted from me. |
hurried into the street scarcely knowing or car
ing where l might GO. 1t was ecstasy, the feel
ing that was upon me then. Only a man who
has been rescued from direct danger can under
stand the sensations of the moments that fol-
lowed. Then came reaction; a fever attacked
Strained in every nerve, / came close to serious
sickness. The horrors of that one night surpass
all the unwhOlescme experiences that / ever en-
drred. | would not 60 through it again for any
treasure that could be offered. 1t was a hideous
night, hideous beyond all hint or description"
Such is Jay Gould's story OF the one time in
his life when he was really scared" AS jay
Gould himself tells it I repeat it.