St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1885-02-23
A TRUTHFUL TRIO.
Ratchet Day Stories Told by Mark Twain,
Nasty and Eli Perkins.

Ratchet Day Stories Told by Mark Twain
Nasty and Eli Perkins.
Mark Twain and Petroleum V. Nasty, says
Dom Piatt, dined with Eli Perkins at the
latter's residence in New York. The CONVEX
sation at that dinner l shall never forget.
The stories told and the "reminiscences
| brought out at that dinner would fill n small
book
After the last course, and after the ladies
had Withdrawn. the conversation turned
upon horses. Finally Mr.. Twain laid down
his cigar and asked Perkins and Nasty if
they had ever heard OF fast horse he Mark
used 10 own in Nevada.
~ think not" said Nasty.
"Well gentlemen" continued Mr. Twain
as be blew a smoke ring and watched It.
''that was fast horse. He was a very fast
horse. But he was so tough bitted that
couldn't guide him with a bit at all -
How dli YOU guide HING asked Eli.
''Well, gentlemen, | had to guide him with
electricity. had TO have wire lines and had
to keep battery in the wagon all the time in
order to stop him."
"Why didn't yoa stop him by hollering
who-af' asked Eli.
''Stop him by ho,lering who a ~ exclaimed
Mr.. Twain. ''Why | could not boiler loud
enough to make that horse hear me. He
tr aYelcd so fast that no sound ever reached
him from behind. lie went faster than the
sound. sir. Holler whoa aud he'd he in the
next town before the sound Of your voice
could reach the dashboard. Travel fastP |
should say he could. Why / once started
from Virginia City for Meadow Creek right
in front of one OK the most dreadful rain
storms we ever had on the Pacific coast.
Wind aud rainl Why the wind blew eighty
miles an hour aud ihc rain fell IN sheets.
drove right before that storm for three hours
just on the edge Of that hurricane and
rain FOR forty miles,
Didn't you get dreuched,'
"Drenchedi No. sir. Why, tell YOU,
drove right in from. Of that raiustorm. I
could lean backward and feel rain and catch
haii-stones. When the hurricane Stacked 10
the horse Stacked up. too, and when il blew
faster just said 'g--lkr 10 the horse and
touched the battery, and away we went. Now
| don't want 70 lie about my horse. Mr.. Per-
kins, and don't ask YOU to believe what I
>ay.. but tell you truthfuIly that when / got
% Meadow Creek my linen buster vas dry as
powder. Not = drop Of rain on the wagon
arFfl
fun Of hsilstOues and water, or I'm a.
a.
'L0uk here gentlemen" interrupted Mr.
Nasby, speaking Of the truth, did you ever
Dear about my striking that man in Toiedo.''
Mark said be had never heard about il.
Il doa't think It diG. II was too sudde q.
The bystanders said If l was going to strike a
second blow they wanted 70 move cut II the
state. Vow, l don't want you 70 believe me,
and don't expect YOU viii. but to tell you
the honest truth. Mr. Perkins, sGuAshed that
man righ, down into a dOor-mst, aud mis-
own wife, zhO Was lacking down one edge
Of the carpet At the time, came right along
aud took him for 4 Zutta percha Tug, and
actually tackled him down IN front OF the
door. Poor woman. she never knew she vas
tsckinE down her Own husbands What De-
came Of the lacks in bis mouth yOu ask
well the next dzy the boys pulled them out
o. the bottoms oi his over-sAoes. and
''6eutismenl'i interrupted XII. lit DOES
ne good - bear such truths I believe ev-
ery word yua say aud | feel that o1zh. TO
exchange truths Eith yO1- Nov, did you
ever hear hos vent to przycr-neetiug NJ
Nsz London, Conn, in . rzin-stora,''