The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1885-09-10
NO. l4ll.
CoUrtesies and Discourtesies.

There are many courtesies which
gentleman should render to q lady, the
absence of which is at once felt, and
causes people 10 involuntarily remark
inwardly 10 themselves. if not aloud to
their friends, That man has not good
manners. D." | passed that judgment the
other evening when was sitting with
a friend by her fircside. A gentleman
was ushered in who was we'll known to
my friend. but comparative stranger
to me. He shook hands with her first,
which was, of course, the right thing
TO do, and then, while speaking to her,
he shook hands with me. The breaker
of this law of courtesy was a young
professional man, well endowed with
this worlds goods. | should not re-
cord this little rUdeness if it was only
OF rare occurrence, but | often notice
people guilty of this discourtesv-
namely. that of shaking hands with
one person while they are speaking TO
another person. II you wish to say
more than How do you do?' TO your
hostess, or 10 aAy one else whom you
greet at first, it is less discourteous to
continue your conversation with her
for few moments before taking notice
OF any one near her. than it is to stretch
out your hand and shake that of her
neighbor while your face is turned
away and your lips are addressing an
other person.
The discourteous young man to
whom l have alluded gave me another
reason for my verdict, and as in this
respect also he is by no means the only
rffanlar in C,.nara1 IL
mention the little rudeness. There are
three, If not more, separate syllables
and sounds which some people utter or
make when they have not heard what
has been said to them, or when they
wish to express assent. These are
What? Eli? Uh? and a cultural sound
OF the letter III, which can not be ex-
pressed III writing. Il beg your par
don," or What did you say?" are
sentences which should certainly be
said when q repetition is asked for;
and Yes should not be replaced by
grunt when an assent is given.
There are numerous little acts which
a man OF courtesy will perform. While
he is calling at Il house, he will rise
and open the door for any lady who
leaves the room, even if she is an en-
tire stranger to him; in his own house
he Will not only open the door of the
room, but accompany the lady to the
hall door, and open that, if there is no
servant at hand to do so, for a depart
ing guest, whether lady or gentleman,
should not be left 10 find their way
alone. Neither should they be allowed
to fad their way into room. When
G,N
company you into the drawing-room,
DO not you, my dear sir, follow the
practice of some forgetful or neglectful
men, who walk in and march straight
up the room, leaving their one guest,
or a train, as the case may be, to fol-
low and to close the door. a host
should open the door, and shut it
after his guests have entered the
room.
Among other small courtosies a gen
tleman viii raise from his chair, how
ever IuNuriousiy comfortable, and offer
assistance, II need be, 10 n lady if she
goes to put Goals on the fire, or if she
tries to open or close a window. When
he escorts her into Il room, he will see
that she is seated before he looks for a
chair for himself; when he escorts her
to table, he will wait to arrange for
her comfort, hold the chair, or push it
backward or forward, as required, be-
fore he takes his own seat And dur
ing the meal he will see that she is pro-
vided with all she is likely to want
The lady ought not to be obliged to
ask for salt, for water, for another cup
OF tea, or, III fact, for anything that is
on the table. From CGSSeWS MaQazine
for September.