The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1885-03-07
Eiis Nye Turns over The White
House.
To PRESIDENT CLEVELAND:

To President CLEVELAND:
Dear sir-The painful duty Of turn
ing over to YOU the administration of
these United States and the key to the
front door of the White House has
been assigned TO me. Gou will find
the key hanging inside the storm-door
and the cistern pole up stairs in the
haymow of the barn.
1t is expected that you will make
such changes IN your cabinet and 9TH
er furniture as YOU may see fit. The
asparagus bed, however, will need a
little top dressing in the spring, and
YOU can do rs you see fit about putt
ing pillow-shams on the pie-plant he'd.
In our attitude toward foreign powers
you will, Of course, have your own
ideas, and suggestion from me at
this time would be entirely out Of
place. Govern the people with firm
yet gentle hand, and put a little rat
poison down cellar where il will do the
most good.
| have made a great many suggcs-
tons to the outgoing administration
relative to tie transfer of the Indian
bureau from the department of the in
terror 10 that of the "Sweet bye and
bye" The Indian, | may say, has
been Il great source Of annoyance to
me, several OF their number having
jumped one Of most valuable mining
claims on White river. Still do not
complain Of that This mine, however,
am convinced would be good pay
ing property if properly worked and
should you at any time wish to take
the regular army and such other
help as You may need and recapture
it from our red brother, | would be
glad to give YOU a controlling interest
in it.
You will observe, on taking posses
sion Of the administration, that the
navy IS little bit weathcr-beaten and
wormy. | would suggest that it be
be newly painted in the spring. If it
had been my good fortune to receive
a majority Of the sufrages of the peo-
pie for the office which you now hold,
| should have the painted the navy
red Shll, that need not influence you
in the course which You may see fit to
adopt
You Will find all papers in their APP
propriate pigeon-holes, and a small
jar Of cucumber pickles down cellar,
which were left over, and to which YOU
will be perfectly welcome. The as
peuties and heart burnings that were
the immediate result Of a bet and I'M
usually bitter campaign, are nov all
buried. Take these pickles and use
them as though they were your own.
They are none too good for you. You
deserve them. We may differ politl-
cally, but that need not interfere with
eur warm personal friendship.
Yeu will also find half ION Of coal
left over, and an old AK in the wood
shed which a man from Ohio left with
us to have ground. OF course, YOU
do not make a business Of receiving
presents, but you cannot refuse to re
ceige these as q slight testimonial Of
regard, and not in the nature Of
bride.
There are many affairs Of great mo-
ment which / have not enumerated il
this brief letter, because / felt some
little delieacy and timidity about APP
pearing to be at all dictatorial or Of
ficious about a matter wherein the
public might charge me with interfer
ence
hope you will receive the forego-
ing in a friendly spirit, and whatever
your convictions may be upon great
questions of national interest, either
foreign or domestic, that you will not
undertake to blow out the gas OH re-
firing, and that you will in other ways
realize the fond anticipations which
are now cherished on your behalf by
mighty people whose aggregated eye
Is now on to you.
BILL NYE
T. S.-You Will be little surprised
no doubt, to find no soap in the laun-
dry or bathrooms. 1t probably got
into the campaign in some way and
was absorbed. b. \.