Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1885-12-27
\ Troublesome Bee.

" htNic N'iio" uhsf Dtt, "nlcU Dal
been !oailng the greater portion of the
day around the slrup bottle in neigh
boring soda shop. CHANGED to stroll
into a shaving saloon on Common
street, and in very short time proved
that small thing can cause a great
deal of trouble
While the German proprietor Of the
barber-shop was shaving a fat man.
and saying: at vas a warm day, and if
1t don't get cooler We meits.' the bee
came and buZled around the ear of the
tat man, who became nervous and
slapped at 1t viciously. Then the bee
SCARED around III a short circle. and en-
deavored to make a landing and rest
on the German BARRIERS nose who in
turn wiped the air with both hands in
Sfooilsh attempt to Kill the ANNOYING
insect, but the bee darted at him. and
he lodged behind the chair and yelled
to the shop boy: Hans, come here
right away und make de bee 90 avav."
Hans obeyed instructions, and seeing
the bee humming lazily around, he
opened on it with wet towel, and the
first swash he made Knocked a couple
OF globes off the gas-tixture, and the
bee retallated by singing him on
the lip. This excited Hans. who
charged around the shop after the bee,
and worked his towel so vigorously
that he succeeded in whacking every
customer that occupied 4 chair and
caused an irate Frenchman to exclaim:
'Sacre! what for you heet me when
you knock AT ze leetle bug. Aha. by
gar. don do Eat some more.
About this time the bee, who should
have been employing his time sucking
flowers. saw that he had stirred up the
shop. 50 he flew along the line of chairs.
and coming to :. bald-headed man tried
to Craze around on his pate. but the at
tending barber struck at him with a
hairbruSh. whereupon the bee hit him
under the left ear. and then charged
the whole shop. 1t buzzed in a way
that indicated 1t meant business, and
after tapping the Frenchman on the
nose. the German proprietor over the
eye. and the fat man on the chin. it
managed to array the wounded men
against it. The Frenchman who was
ViAN WIN laSt.
brush. the fat man broom. and the
German barber an umbrella. Each
man kept his eve fixed on the bee. and
noticed nothing else. and struck at it
with all their strength. The first VOL
ley OF blows aimed at the agile honey
maker resulted i'll the Erenchman be-
ing Knocked down by the fat mans
broom, while the barber peeled all the
skin of his nose with the umbrella.
lhe excitement was SO great and the
hight WAS 50 hot that neither the bar
Der nor the fat man noticed that the
frenchman had received the blows,
hit with their eyes still fixed on the
bee. ami mlstaklng the yells of the
PROSTATE F:enchman for encouraging
they continued TO strike at the
bee with all their strength, which in
missed the bee and hit the un-
fortunate man on the floor, and had
not policeman. attracted by howls
and the sound of breaking glass. en-
tered the shop, he would have been
beaten TO pulp. 1t is necessary to say
that the bee. as soon as it grew tired OF
parching the head of the whole crowd,
escaped without brUise, and left the
Ierman barber and fat man TO explain
matters with the unfortunate French
AsU Orleans Times jJsmo~
Jones was well aware that his wife
was in the habit of riiling his pockets
when he was asleep, but, like wise
man. he kept silence on the subject.
One night, however. he awoke and
caught her in the act
"Ha!' be exclaimed, .what are yos
doing. my dear?"
The lady started her cheeks flushed.
the pantaloons dropped from her grasp.
and she was about To make u full con-
fession when a bright idea entered her
head. Recovering her composure she
said:
Il was looking to see whether your
pantaloons needed any buttons.
They do, they do, my dear" he
springing from bed, need
ed EN- for weeks. months, and l Won
iered why you didn't sew 'em on; but
waited, for | was sure YOU would get
TO it some time. And how kind of YOU
to get out of bed at this time of night
10 attend to EN-. Say what you will.
there's nothing in the world like
good wife. Let me turn up the gas Il
little. SOS you'll have all the light you
want in sewing 'em on. Got your
needle and thread and the buttons?
No. Well, tell me where they are and
III get them for you.
Mrs. Jones proceeded to sew on the
buttons. while her husband sat on the
side OF the bed and encouraged cher
with words of praise for her witely
care and thought for his comfort, Oc-
casIonaLly remarklng that 90 where he
would he would always say there was
nothing in the world like a good wife.
Then he went to the wardrobe and |
brought out several pair of trousers,
coat. two or three old vests, and a
number of shirts, from all of which !
buttons were missing, and cheerily OBJ |
served:
While we're at it we'll make
night of it.
Two hours later. when Mrs. Jones. !
With weary sign, removed the thlm- |
bic from her finger, Mr.. Jones patted |
her on the cheek and said:
Il say il again, my dear, say it |
again, that wherever 20 | will make |
It known. proclaim it from the house |
tops. shout it in the highways and by |
ways. that a wife who gets up in the |
middle of the night TO sew buttons on |
ler husbands clothes is 4 priceless |
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