davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
Petrifactions.

Petrified mummies' eyes are the
latest craze for watch charms.
A human body, buried in Bris-
tol On, Fl. cemetary nine years ago,
was removed and found to be petri-
fed.
A petrifed snake was recently
discovered in sandstone rock at
Portsmouth, Ohio.
A petrifed hickory log, four feet
long and nine inches in diameter,
was found lately about eleven feet
below the surface, by workmen max
ing an excavation in Greenboro,
South Carolina.
Four petrifed sharks teeth, from
one-fourth to one-half an inch long,
were brought up recently from the
Americus ga. )-artesian well, which
is down some nine hundred odd
feet, and has not yet reached a sup
ply OF good water.
The petrified wool found in the
Rocky Mountain regions Is rapidly
bee ,ming utilized. In San Francis
CO there is a factory for cutting and
polishing the petri6ctions into man
tel pieces. tiles tablets and other
architectural parts for which marble
or slabs is commonly used. Pe,ri-
fed wood is said to oe suscepti-
BILE of a finer polish than mar
bic or even onyx, the latter of which
it is driving from the market.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
An Old Doctor story

Il have a little story to tell you,
boys" the old doctor said to the
young people the other evening.
"One day-a long, hot day it had
been, tool met my father on the
way to town.
81 wish you would take this pack
age to the village for me, Jim,' he
said, hesitating.
Now, | want boy of II, not
fond of work, and was Just out OF
the hay field, where ! had been at
work since daybreak. | was tired,
dusty and hungry. 1t was two miles
into town. / wanted to get my sup
per, and to wash and dress for sing
ing school.
my first impulse was to refuse,
and to do it harshly. Tor l ives vex-
ed that he should ask after my long
days work. If | did refuse, he
would go himself, He was gentle,
patient old man. But something
stopped me one of Gods good an
gels, i think.
"Of course, father, I'll take it. l
said, heartily giving my scythe to
one of the men. He gave me the
package.
THANK you, Jim,' | was goin g
myself, but somehow don't feel
very strong to-day"
He walked with me to the road
that turned off to the town; as he
left, put his hand on my arm, say
ing again: Thank you, my son.
You have always been a good boy
to me, jim"
II hurried into town and back
again.
"When | came near the house 7
saw crowd of farm hands at the
door. One of them came to me, the
tears rolling down his face.
"Your father he SAID, fell dead
just as you reached the house. The
last words he spoke were to you,'
=" I'm an old man now, out I have
thanked God over and over again in
all the years that have passed since
that hour, that those last words
were: You've always been a good
boy to me-
No human being ever vet was sor-
~ for love and kindness shown to
Others. But there is no pang or re-
morse so keen as the bitterness with
which we remember neglect or cool
ness which we have shown to loved
ones who are dead.
Do not begrudge loving deeds and
kind words, especially to those who
gather with you about the same
hearth. In many families the hab-
it of nagging, crossness or ill-natur-
eo gibbing gradually covers the real
feeling of love that lies deep be-
meath.
And after all it is such a little
way that we can 60 together.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
Marry.

The Detroit Journal publishe,
from an old newspaper. the Herald
dated January, 1917. the following
which is good advice for 1885:
If you are for pleasure-marry
If you prize rosy health-marry
And even if money be your OBJ
ject-marryl
A good wife is heavens last best
gift to man-his angel and minister
of graces innumerable--his Sal Pot
yesesium or gem of many virtues
his Pandora, or casket of celestial
jewels. Her presence forms bis best
company-her voice, his sweetest
muslc-her smiles, his brightest
day-her kiss, the guardian Of his
innocence-her arms, the pale of his
safety, the balm of his health, the
balsam of his life-her industry, his
surest wealth-her economy, bis
safest steward-her lips, his faithful
est counsellors-her bosom, the soft
est pillow of his cares-and her
prayers the ablest advocates OF
heavens blessings on his head.
If you love the Creator, you ought
to marry, to raise him up worship
pers; if you love the ladies, you
ought to marry to make them hap
py-if you love mankind. you ought
to marry to perpetuate the glorious
race-if you love your country, you
you ought to marry, to raise up
soldiers to defend tin fine, if you
wish well to earth or heaven, you
ought to marry, to give good citizens
to one, and glorious angels to the
other
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
The WIimot Proviso.

The Wilmot Proviso, which was
destined to play an important part
in politics, originated at the dinner
table ola political club in New York
which met weekly. 1t was compos-
ed OF Democrats opposed to the ex-
tension ofslavery, and among those
present on the day in question were
John Van Buren, Samuel J. Tilden.
John A. Kennedy, Isaac Fowler,
Andrew II. Greene, and other free
soil Democrats,
Mr.. Howe, western member of
Congress, was a guest, he having vis-
tied New York to confer with the
Democratic opponents of slavery.
During the consultation John Van
Buren said that the protest against
the extension of slavery introduced
into Congress was not worded right.
He suggested that the exact words
of Jefferson in the ordinance of 'S3
and 'S7 should be used. This was
agreed to. Mr.. Howe stated that it
would be difficult to introduce the
proviso, as the Speaker would not
give the floor to any one friendly to
freedom. Mr.. Tilden, as the chief
organizer of the movement to be
made, proposed that a ruse should
be played. 1t was agreed that each
man composing the little body of
sixteen to eighteen freesoilers in
Congress should have a copy OF the
proviso in his pocket. Each should
spring to the floor at the first
chance and shout, Mr.. Speaker l''
1t was thought that one of them
would be recognized. Mr.. Tiiden,
with other members of the club,
went 70 Washington to aid in car
rying out the plan.
At the time agreed upon the Spar
tan band, each 'gith the proviso in
his hand, sprang 20 the floor and in
concert shouted, "Mr. Speaker !"
The Speaker was bewildered. He
could not ignore the whole crowd.
He selected Judge Wilmot as the
most moderate of the party, and so
the Wilmot proviso passed into his
tory Ben Periey Poore.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

The Philadelphia Times has the
following to saw of what has become,
if not a national question, at least a
very important one:
I'VE are undoubtedly arriving at
that point in our national progress
when a sweeping reform is neces-
sary in the matter of burying the
dead. The scandal that all men are
beginning to fear in connection with
the expenses Of the Grant funeral is
only larger illustration of smaller
instances equal in demoralizing pow
er. 1t is no secret anywhere that
the pomp and ceremony attendant
upon the average burial costs twice
or thrice what they are worth, and
it is equally well known that fam
lilies who can but i'll afford such dis
play from false motives yet endeav-
or to initiate it. All over the coun-
try the same extrayagances are ap-
parent,and it is probable a fortunate
thing for all people that the Grant
exercises made such extravangances
particularly conspicuous.
There is no sense in covering the
bier ofany man or woman with such
tributes of flowers as make US after
wards regard flowers with more sor-
row than pleasure. The season of
death is not joyous one and the
robing OF the death as if for a feast
or bridal festival is the most sicken-
ing evidence ofa thoroughly deprav-
ed taste or feeling And what could
be more inappropriate from any
standpoint than to close a life that
has run its simple and unselfsh
course entirely away from the strife
Of publicity with such a service and
procession as inevitably lead to an
entire forgetfullness of the simple
virtues of the dead ? The lives of
men and women should point stron-
ger morals than the mere burial of
their breathless bodies, and the NOR
bid taste for display and newspaper
notoriety. if to be suppressed at the
brink of the grave. The increasing
cost of funerals and the consequent
financial worry that comes at a
time when men bear it least consti-
tute another aspect of the case that
cannot longer be concealed.
by and by, perheps, it may oc-
cur to the leaders who have set these
senseless styles, that death and bur-
ial should be above fashion. A sim
pie, impressive service, without dis
play at the home, church or grave.
or undue lavishness in any way, can
but commend itself to all. Who can
doubt that all this world would be
more in harmony with the dread oc-
casion it would commemorate. II
the Grant funeral shall emphasize
these facts and bring back the bur-
ial custom to somewhat near what
it ought TO be there will be count
less persons to profit, in more ways
than one, from the change thus eff
fected. +"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
The Cost or Her Beauty.

An old lady over eighty years of
age. and who was once a great beau
ty died recently in Paris, leaving af-
ter ber a diary in which she endeav-
ors to show the alleged vanity of
women. From the age of twenty to
thirty she spent three hours day
at her toilet, which foots up for the
period one year ninety-one days
and six hours employed in dressing
her hair, powdering her cheeks and
painting her lips. From thirty to-
fifty the toilet labors amounted to
five hours day, the extra hours be-
ing consecrated to covering up the
tracks of time. including the obliter-
alton of crows feet and other neces-
sary filling in and grading. Time,
four years and forty days. After
fifty her efforts bad to be redoubled.
To the last che resists the effects Of
time.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
Cooling the Cellars.

A great mistake is sometimes
made in ventilating cellars and
milk houses. The object of ventila-
ton is to keep the cellars cool and
dry, but this object often fails of be-
ing accomplished by common mis-
take, and instead, the cellar is made
both warm and damp. A cool place
should never be ventilated unless
the air admitted is cooler than that
within, or at least as that, or but
very little warmer. The warmer the
air, the more moisture it holds in
suspension. Necessarily, the cooler
the air, the more this moisture Is
condensed and precipitated. When
cool cellar is aired on warm day,
the air entering being IN motion, ap-
pears cool; but as it fills the cellar,
the cooler air with which it becomes
mixed chills it, the moisture is con-
densed, and dew is deposited on the
walls, and may often be seen run
ming down them in streams. Then
the cellar is damp and soon becomes
moldy. To avoid this the windows
should only be opened at night-the
last thing before retiring. There is
no need to fear that the night air is
unhealthful it is as pure as the air
OF midday, and really drier. The
cool air enters the apartment and
circulates through it. The windows
should be closed before sunrise in
the morning and kept closed and
shaded during the day. If the air
of a cellar is damp it may be thor
oughly dried by placing in it peck
of lime in an open box. a peck OF
lime absorbs about seven pounds or
three quarts of water, and in this
way cellar may soon be dried even
in the hottest weather. A bushel OF
lime absorbs twenty-seven pounds
of water and still appears as dry as
powder. In this condition it will be
very useful to spread over the gar
den or lawn or about fruit trees, or
it may be used for whitewash. This
precautlon is often necessary in the
dairy, because of the prevalence,
where air is damp, of mildews and
the various forms of mold.
The orange and red kinds of mold
especially. which sometimes forms
dpOp the cream, have Z most inju-
rious effect upon the butter-Amer-
ieGa A1ricuiturisf.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
A Confounded Fool.

Are YOU interested in the subject
of steamship navigation, sir?" said
wheezy old man with wandering
eye, as he took seat and made him
self at home in the private office ol
State street business house the 9th.
er day.
No, sir, I'm not" said the head
of the firm, rather curtly.
If a man was to tell you that he
could build a ship that would cross
the Atlantic in "a hours, what would
you say ?" inquired the old man
as he leaned forward to catch the
answer.
sd say he was a confounded
fool" responded the merchant. with
emphatic promptness.
Well, sir, / can build that very
ship"
"You can ?"
Yes, sir, l can."
Then, sir, permit me to strength
en- my previous remark by saying
that consider you a blamed sight
bigger fool than my first observation
indicated"
Why so, sir ?"
Because you don't build it; good
day, SIR"
The old man picked up his hat
and slid out.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
= Terrible Tale.

Since the invasion of Northern
California by the grasshoppers there
has been made a marked revival in
the literature appertaining to the in
teresting insect.
II remember in II" said a mem
Der of the Grain Exchange yester-
day. Il was coming across the
plains. Well, sir, | was seated in a
car reading a newspaper about doom,
when suddenly it grew quite dark,
and | thought sure a terrible storm
was ON Us. 1t was cloud of grass
hoppers 80 thick that when they
settled on the car-track they stopped
the train. There was good feed
where we were Just then, and it
brought the hoppers to halt. We
Were blocked for twenty-four hours,
until a snowplow was telegraphed
for, and when it cut the way for US
it left a bank of 'hoppers on each
side higher than the smoke-stack of
the locomotive"
THAT was pretty bad" said
another broker, "but have seen
worse. We were camped one SUM-
mer in Kansas, making a survey for
new town. The hoppers struck US
at night, and in the morning we
thought that the end Of the world
had come. They were piled, sir,
twenty feet deep over our encamp-
ment and we were nine hours tun-
neling out of them. If we did not
happen to have few giant powder
cartridges to blast out air holes we
should have been suffocated before
we could have struck a shovel into
the mass"
Didn't you have any of EN- p
inquired warehouseman, who had
seen a good deal of Western life.
what do you mean ?" asked the
broker.
Just this: | was caught In the
same fix you have told about, once
in Kansas. | was in charge Of
mule team hauling supplies to a
railroad camp. Among other things
we had several thousand yards Of
canvass for tents for the men. As
soon as the grasshoppers struck US
] put my gang to work and IN short
time we bad a canvass sack made,
balloon fashion, only bigger than
any balloon you ever saw. Well, sir,
we filled it chOck full of hoppers-
live hoppers-and hitched it on the
wagons, and when the swarm star
ted to go our Gagged hoppers went
with them"
"And took off your balloon?"
"Mo, Stree they hauled our wa
gon for over seventy-eight miles,
when they broke down and we bag
ged a new lot. Il beat mule power
all hollow. Then it occurred to me
-" But his audience had gone.
and the Western man, growing, II
suppose the darn fools think I'm
green. walked off TO find a more
credulous and attentive auditory.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
Cuban Railways.

About the only instance of compe-
ton which | have encountered in
Cuba, is that between the two lines
OF railway extending from Havana
to Matanzas. In general, railway
iare Is phenominally high. The tar
iif from Havana to Clenfuegos on
the southern coast is SIG in gold,
and the railway company held !
meeting not long ago to ascertain, if
possible, why the receipts don't ex-
ceed the expenses. But first-class
fare by the longest of the two routes
to this city is only s1.10, and by the
shortest s1.50. Second and third
class fares are proportionately cheap
er. The long route has train that
pushes right through in two hours
without stopping, save two or
three times at different railway
functions.
Tourists ordinarily make the trip
out by one route, and back by the
other.
A railway train in Cuba is not
such a curiosity as cne in frdia,
Burmah, or even Europe The soll-
ing stock was manufactured in New
England, and shipped here a few
centuries ago. 1t consequently has
venerable, but withai familiar look
to any one whose experience runs
back to the primitive sort of coach
es and engines that characterized the
early history Of railroading in our
country.
1t is in the shird-class coaches that
you get the best glimpse of real Gu
ban life.
You see the negroes and the Chi
namen, and the poor Cubans and
the Spanish soldiers all mingling on
a common level. You see every
peasant, black or white, stow some
live chickens away under the seat,
and you wonder, as have done a
score of times. | have seen two
thirds of the wealthy Cuban passen-
gers on a steamboat take chickens
into their irst-class cabins. When
the train stops at station Of some
importance, in rush men and boys
with various kinds of native fruits
for sale, country cheese, lightning
bugs, and above all, lottery tickets.
The hghtning-bugs are principally
purchased by tourists as curiosities,
for the Cuban lightning bug. if he
could be trained to systematic ill.,
minating habits and brought into
the United States, would soon bank
rupt the various electric light COM
panies.
When it is time for the train 10
start wrinkled, emaciated China
man rings hand-bell lethargically.
and the engine pulls out.
The first-class car is put at the
rear of the train, and is nearly emp
ty except in the tourist season. On
one railroad there is a machine in
the forward end Of each coach dis
playing placard that reads, PrOx.
ina Estacion, - IL would not
be amiss if some Of our railroads
thus announced to the eve as well as
to the ear the name of the next sta
ton, but | imagine some way would
be found in our country of having
the moving wheels ofthe car operate
the machine instead of sapping the
life-blood of the tired conductor
Hdta0zas Cor. Netc Orleans Times
DEMO- rat
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
Value OF Telephone stock.

/ have devoted myself TO cleo
tricity ever since | was boy" con-
cluded Mr.. Chinook in response to
a question as to .he money repre-
sented in electrical enterprise, and
| confess that , feel more ignorant
than l did at The beginning. Who
can understand this mysterious force
which is becoming 80 important a
servant to man As to the money
represented, it is simply incslcula-
bic. The great telephone case, re-
Gently decided. is said to have in
volved more than s100,OO0,CO0. al
though the telephone patents have
only about nine years longer to rGn-
In 1873 / might have bought one
hundred shares OF telephone stock,
par value 800. for 5000 and the
investment would have brought me
100000 by this time"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
A Misconception.

Just one" said the lover, as he
stood upon the stoop with his girl,
"iust onel"
Just one." said the mother, put
ting herhead out of the bedroom win
dow above; "well / guess it amt so
late as that, but it's pretty near IL.
and you'd better be going or her
father will be down
And the lover took his leave with
pain in his heart.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

Mr.. g. E. Bryan, No Isl Putnam
street, Cleveland, ONO, has naturally
much experience in sickness,-with
a family Of seven children, and his
doctors and druggists bills are
heavy. He states publicly that he
has given Red Star Cough Cure a
thorough trial in bis home, and finds
it to be the best remedy that he has
ever used for coughs or colds. II
contains neither morphia nor opium,
and therefore leaves no depressing eff.
fects.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

l notice however much a girl
struggles when you try to get a kiss,
if she hears her pas step approach
ing she always lets up on the strug-
gle long enough to nab the kiss be-
fore the old man appears.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

A Chicago firm is introducing
wooden slippers into this country,
The small boy lie all in sweat for
fear his mother will take it into her
head to buy q pair.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
4 DMINIsTRATOR's NOTICE.

EState of Polly Alwins, decd, late OF Conemsugh
Twp. County. Pa
Letters Of administrative On the above estate
hsvinr been Kranssd 10 she undersigned by the
prupef suthosisy, notice is hereby given 20 all
uerSoos tpdsbts1 10 uSd estate TO make imnedt
Ate peyment and those having claims axainst tbs
eame 70 present them duly authenticated for ses-
ISAAC L. YODER,
ny Administrator.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
A RIVER DREAM.

The blue, blue sky above.
The blue, blue water under.
Two eyes more blue and heart that's true,
And a boat to bear me with my love
To lands OF light and wonder.
The sunny fields around,
The river ripping By us,
A smile more bright than monday light;
Our brows with meadow garlands crowned,
and never q care to try us.
A drifting with the tide,
A wind that whispers greeting,
An isle of rest In the faded west.
With only the waves on the shore beside
And two hearts fondly beating.
Harold Z. Borifon, in CasseNs MagG=ia
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

@What are the prospects Of this
town for circus?" asked the adj
vance agent of Kentucky citizen /;
''think we'd draw a crowd? ?" The
citizen shook his head obviously.
~Thar's to be a man hung here in
September, an reckon everybody II
be savin' up money fur that"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

Dogs may not need to have their
mouths shut up at this season OF
the year, but women certainly need
muslin.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

Love is blind. but matrimony is a
great oculist.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07
MITCHELL WAGON,

Which am selling will certify to my statement that
they are the VERY BEST Farm Wagon made They are IN
general nearly every country the face OF the
globe and adapted every variety of climate 1t ac-
knowledged by all to be the best proportoned best oned
best finished and gest running wagon made present
that should be read by farmer about the Mitch
ell Wagons
st Great is taken in selecting only the best timber
that which cnt at the he year and
piled under sheds until thoroughly seasonedT OF he himbe-
kens much heavier than other kens In use and
therefore liable break g. The hubs dodgemors-
ed which makes strongest and durable wheel that
can be constructed The patent box-couplng used only by
this Company prevents the wearing and weakening OF the
axle s. The MITCHELL WAGON stands to-day at the
head and front of all competitors and known Tar and wide
as the strongest and most durable unequaled quality and
nish and monarch of the road wherever known and used
Don't fail give CALL and the wagon for yourself
Remember for the next NINETY DAYS am selling these
wagons greatly reduced prices 1t will pay to buy OF me
and to buy Prices furnished on application
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1885-10-07

Time has laid his hand uron my heart
gently, not shifting it. but as q harper lays
bis open palm upon his harp to deaden its
vibrations Golden LEGEND