The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-15
The Presiden, Gone Fishing.
through Mail Magazine

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 The president, so am told, has gone l fishing. He was so burdened with the duties of his high office and worred by the importuni,es of men who want office, that he had to go fishing or dle, and strange as 1t may seem to the common herd who were never president of any thing more important than a debating so- cie,y or Sunday school, the head Of the nation chose to go fishing.
 When men were boys, they went fish ing because they expected to have a good time and catch some brain food for lhem- selves, but when a man has been elected president of the United States and duty lnaugurated, he never goes fishing except on the advice of his physicians, and then, when he does conclude to go, he takes a cheap colored brother along to watch his reel and yell to him fl he gets bite, when he gets up from the game of GU chre he is playing in a mosquito bar tent and cones and pu Is the fish out of the water and then goes back to his game while the colored brother takes the fish of the hook, baits it and watches for the presidents second bite
 This Is official fishing, and 1t pays much better than the oia-fashtoned kind we editors loved when we were boys The president gets just as much for 4,ch- ing hsh with darky and piece of liver as he receives for pioting the ship of state, namely, SI37 per day and house rent thrown in. In this connection, the editor of the Magdsine wishes to remark that if anybody will pay him SI37 a day and expenses, he will go fishing or run Whiia fha ry~a,AAuf away, as the latter may prefer.
 Of course the presidents heakh will be much improved by his fishing. He will come home in two weeks, and he will not be in the White House fifteen minutes until everybody will observe how tanned and hearty the darky appeared and com pliment the president upon the benchciai results of his excursion, and then the president will feel better and make so ne more vacancies on account of offensive partisanship and swear at his cook and chambermaids, and talk about civil scr. vice reform until the doctors advise him to go to sea. when he will take passage in the United States navy for New York and be run over by hshing-boat sixteen fee! long and four feet wide and rescued by the Coat-tails, while the secretary of the navy and his trunk will go to the bottom, and ali the old whisky and imported wine they may have on board will be eaten up by other sharks with the drugstore and surgical instruments in the surgeons cabin.
 In getting of the navy, the president will pro obably skin his nose and sprain h,s finger at the second joint, and then the | newspapers will have something to talk about for time, and the rascals who are to be turned out will have another lease of life, and the pu olic will anxiously await the cheering news to be gleaned from the bulletins to be posted oy some famous doctor of whom the world never heard before, announcing that he IS reskinning and that ID few days, the Teskun nose of the president will bloom over charges against offensive partisans as of yore, and the excitement will gradually die out. and the vice-president will again be forgotten for a season, until the president has an ingrowing toe-nail or a mole On his neck, when the world will again remember that there IS a second office within the gift of the people.
 Itmust shock the dignity of hhe=n- pound bass to bite the presidential hook and be hauled out of the water oy the presidential hand only to be turned over to servant without any promise of a fat office or assurance that he will enjoy the exquisite pleasure of furnishing material for Miss Cievel4nd's next book by being served al tae White House.
 -S-e-s--
 Crowns Iron Tonic enriches the blood.