The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1885-11-28
VOLUME XVII.

and grade Of lecturer who does his best
business when visiting place the first
time. He was then curiosity 1t was
a joke of his that he was once invited to
lecture in Pennsylvania town. lie
went, but found no advertising had
been done nor any preparation made.
He was referred to young man. who
told him he had been called there to ad-
dress about twenty five fellows, who
wanted te lock themselves in, chew
tobacco. add be comfortable. Josh
Billings agreed. and got his seventy five
dollars for that star chamber lecture.
The only relevancy that the title, Milk"
had to the lecture Of that name was that
billings drank q glass of milk at its
outset. Such was the oddly of his life.
his thinking. and say ngs Here are
"Sum oy His sayings
ut IL better to no less than-to kno so mulch
"a broken reputasbun is like a broken
vase II may be mepde1, but always shows
where the krak was
"If you kant trust a man for the full
amount let him skip. This trying to get an
average on honesty has always been fall
ure.
'rhare is no treachery in sllence-slenee
is hard segufnent to beat.
men ov the most karacter hav the fewest
HABITS.
''rliare IL cheats in all things-even plzon
IL adultcrIted
'The man vino IL thoroughly polite liz 2
thirds ov Christian enny how.
kindness IL an inst mkt, politeness only
an art.
."ihare ~ great deal ov learning in this
world. which . notl, ng more than trieing to
prove what we don't understand
mi denr boy. there are but few who kan
IN n q n nd
reach the top and probably you and don /
belong 10 that number
"One ov the biggest mistakes made yet II
made by the man who thinks he is temper
ate, lust because he puts more water in his
whisky than his neighbor does"
Josh Billings had lecture called
''The Prohabil'tes of Life; perhaps rain
and perhaps not" The following is a
represent alton, the fidelity of which
many will recognize. OF Josh struggling
with that serio-comic feat:
In 1873 Josh Billings lectured at St.
Joseph. Mo-, to a large aud ence. The
next morning he went into the First
Nat onal Bank, just across the street
from his hotel to get the proceeds of
his lecure-some $500, mostly in 81
and So bills, exchanged for bills OF
| larger denominations. The cashier,
Jos uH Hull, WAS temporarily DuSy,
and Josh turned aside to a street
window to await his turn. Joseph C.
Corby, proprietor of the st. Joseph
Gazette. entered on business He had
heard Josh lecture the night previous
recognized him at once. and engaged
him in casual con, ersation. during
which Josh exhibited his "roll.n re-
marking that as he was on his way to
San Francisco over the Union Pacific
line he was afraid they would charge
him for extra baggage if he carr ed that
big wad along. and that he had come
to get it reduced. In few minutes
the cashier was at liberty, the two
stepped to the counter. and Corby
courteously introduced Josh to Mr..
Hull.
why don't you introduce yourself
firstp' said Josh, turning abruptly upon
Corbv.
Corby made as graceful an apology
as man could who was half-em-
barrassed and three-fourths mad. and
they shook hands and were friends, but
Corby will never forget his first
introduction to Josh Billings. Toledo
Cor. Chicago Inter Ocean.