Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-01-22
BRIGHT BITS.

SENATOR EvARTs seems to be a coming
event, though he does not cast much of a
shadow before Washington Star.
"GREAT EDITORS and great pumpkins come
from the country remarks an exchange
which they re.-BUFLin0t0n Free Press.
s'DIDs'T ever kiss a pair of ripe red lips?'
incurred a modern poet. Wen, we should
smile! Who hasn't? AS the Texas delegate
said, what are we here for?'-- Peoks sun.
AN absent husband telegraphed to his wife :
II send you a kiss He received the reply:
'Spruce young man called and delivered the
kiss in good order" PHts6urg Chrontcte- TEL
egraDh.
A Boston GIRL, who saw a fellow with de-
lirium tremens, exclaimed: unhappy man !!
why do you permit yourself to get the James
James," The shock restored the sufferer to
his right mind,
a MEDICAL JOURNAL tells about a young
man in Vermont whose brains have dried up
until they rattle like shot in gOurd every
time he shakes his head. The Boston Post
thinks that he is probably the author of the
Vermont liquor law.
AN .'UncIe Toms Cabin" company is play
ing at Detroit at 10 cents admission. This
looks ike cxtortlon, but it is claimed that the
trouDe carries two dOukeys in the company,
who cannot eat barroom free lunches, ana
they must be fed on hay that costs money,
hence the price of admission.-Neao orleans
Pic0guRe.
AT an evening party. Young lady TO the
boetess)-What a very distingue air that
gentleman has who Is standing near the door.
He is evidently accustomed to moving among
the best people. May | ask, Mrs. B., If he is
one Of your English friends?" Mrs. B, the
hostess lin Il low tone of volceA-"No, he Is
detective"
MR.. CLEvELAND's resignation as Governor
of New York was humOrOusly mlsconstrued
bv an old backWOOdsman at Little Rock, Ark.
no. / EnnWp6 | knOWeO
would skeer him outen it at last. Amt been
'lected MORN a month, an now he haster gin
up. Fust thing you know old Tom hendricks
will fling up his head an quit"
"D1p YOU advertise for a man to do clip
pingg" asked a rural-lOoking individual who
had invaded the EDITORS sanctum. I'll M"
said the ArchImedes of the printing Office; ;
''yOu don't look like 4 clipper. what nave
with the office shears and replied: I've
been shearing sheep" The editor turned to
his yellow paper again and murmured; ~ GU
can get a chance at the brokers' Offices down
in State street; twelve dollars ana halI
clip''-Bost0n Commercial Bulletin.
Two young ladies entered a cigar store and
one of them said timidly: "Have you any
choice cigars, sir? l want them for a
present" "Oh, yes, miss replied the to-
bacconist, 1--WE have any choice you like from
a cent apiece up" 81 think l will take some
Of the one cent ones, then, If they are choice.
I had no idea that choice cigars were so
cheap. Won't Charlie be delightedY" she
said to her companion as they left the store
"Poor boy! He is so fond of choice cigar,
and they viii taste all the BETTER she addeu'
with a little blush, 'fOr having come from
me-"
A BEGGAR rang at a door bell about break
fast time one morning last week and de-
manded something to eat. The servant re-
piled that they did not encourage tramps at
that house. ''Trampsp retOrted the man
with indignation; Il amt no tramp. Pm
respectable beggar" "Weu," replied the
servant, ''we don't encourage those either"
what do yer encourage? Stufin' yourself
full, | s'pose, while yer Teller creators is a
starvin' for a glass o suthin' stlmerlatln'.
That's what YOU are!" And off he went,
leaving behind him his undi sguised contempt
Boston Saturday E0eHing Gazette.