Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-05-21
LANGUAGE OF THE EARS.
The Appearance of the Auricular Append
age Indicative of Character.


The Appearance of the Auricular Append
age Indicative of Character.
IL used to notice when lad, said
successful business man lately to a
reporter. ''that in making the final
awards at country fairs on the quality
of all sorts of blooded stock, the judges
universally examined the ears of the
animals. Whether it were thorough
bred horse, a Berkshire hog, dog of
any special breed, from toy terrier to
bull or pointer, or whether it were
Cotswold or Southdown sheep, the
ear was always one of the chief points,
and if that were faulty, all the other
good qualities went for naught. This
set me thinking that, as men represent
every quality known to the brute crea-
ton, the ears of men would be likely to
serve as pretty sure induces of charac-
ter | then commenced studying.
First of all procured a good specimen
of what we will call the normal human
ear, one taken from the head of man
of good character and in whom all the
various qualities and propensities had
been about evenly balanced, a level
headed, practical man of the world.
This ear studied until had thorough
ly mastered all the convolutions and
surfaces that it presented. I've bought
hundreds of them and now have
ABOUT 200 TYPICAL EARS
that I'll show you" With this the old
duced two packages tied up in oiled
silk, soft and flexible as kid. and semi
transparent. Untying one of these
packages, there fell out on the table a
number of nondescript fragments of
Misunderstanding stuff, which, on
examination, proved to be dried, or
rather partially tanned, human ears,
all in a perfect state of preservation, so
far as the retention of shape is concern
ed. ''Why, where did you get all
these?" Bought 'em of course "Of
the hospitals?" '.No, of the undertake
ers. The ears of criminals and paupers
would be of no use to me. They would
serve no purpose in the way of study;
the character of the criminal is so clear
ly marked that one type is sufficient to
know all by, while paupers have no
character at all. 1t would make some
people stare if they should exhume
their deceased relatives and find that
they are sleeping the last sleep with
only one ear 10 help them listen for the
last trump. The most obstinate fool |
ever had to deal with was a half-starv-
ing artist whose ear wanted to get on
account of its remarkable formation
He was a man of extraordinary business
affairs, but genius. | offered that
man
$500 FOR ONE OF HIS EARS,
and the stupid fellow refused it. He
was poor, half starved didn't | be-
lieve, know where to get the next meal
for himself and his wife and children,
and one would have thought that he
would have jumped at the chance to
get $500 for such n trifing inconven-
fence. | offered to supply him with q
false ear, so as to keep up appearances,
but he would not listen 10 me, and |
missed one of the finest opportunities
of my life. | opened this particular
package to show you one very remark
able example. Here are all sorts of
ears; ears of men who are greatly inn
bued with religious feelings there an
ear, for instance, of reviyalist; ears
of pronounced atheists. ears of honest
men and ears of rogues; ears of cute
lawyers and ears of dull money-grab-
bers, whose only study in life has been
how To hold on to dollar. Here the
ear of somewhat noted newspaper
man, Now, just see how the lobe of
| that ear goes down into the cheek; in
| front there is no lobe to the ear at ALL
don't say, mark you, that every one
who has an ear OF that formation is a
| thief, but do say that he has the pro-
pensities OF one, and only needs oppor-
| tunity or temptation to develop them.
| This ear, in It's principal characters
| tic, is almost the counterpart of pair
| that are worn by man OF former high
| standing in the business world, but
| who is now serving term in the peni-
Tertiary. 1t is only a week or two ago
| l had an occasion to let contract for
building an extensive wall, and among
| the bidders was one who offered to do
the work half Il dollar thousand low
er than any one else. But when / saw
/ the man
HIS EARS TOLD ME
| not to trust him. | know he would
! have robbed me in some way had he
| got the contract. Here's another typi-
cal ear. You see this thin cartilage.
| with the roll disappearing in the north
east corner and the ear itself coming
1 almost to n point, somewhat like a
1 fox's. That is the ear of keen, un-
| scrupulous, hard-hearted money-lend-
| err; one of those who seem to take a
positive delight in expressing the I'M
fortunate and in wringing from them
extortionate interest for small accom-
| modations. Some of these ears set well
back like fox's when it is snarling;
they are the worst cases. In others
the upper point stands slightly for
| ward; such men are rather shrewd and
cunning than cruel, but they are not
| very pleasant folks at the best. Others
OF this sort, again, are movable at the
| Will of their owners. These chaps add
to their other amiable qualities a quar-
relsome disposition that will make
them snap and snarl at everything and
everybody. The only way is to select
a few noteworthy specimens. Study
the ears of some men whose character
you are well acquainted with, and mark
their respective peculiarities. Then
| compare tHOSe OF men OF similar cHar-
acteristics, and see where their strong
est resemblances are; the first discov-
cry of principle for yourself is the on
| ly difficulty. If any one is about to get
married, l could tell him whether the
! woman he is about to wed is likely to
agree with him or not. Oh, you may
set it down for fact that the ear is the
true index of character. Tell me be-
| fore you print anything about this, and
| I'll corner the ear-muif market, and we
will divide the profits. - Boston Sun
day Times
A Swell Reporter.