Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1885-06-04

yesterday. Matter, Great Scott"
SITS too bad, Tom, but then"
eyes, and the worst Of it fl" added
Colonel Ochilsree saysgely, stem dollars
Of it was IN cash.
UEAEswERABLR ARGUMENT.
Chinese mandarin: ssYou Americans
are very. smart but you ore not consist.
emit. /"
American citizen: '1n what wayY
''You spend millions Of dollars send
ing missionaries to IA"
'sThat Is true"
"And the object & 10 flt ~ Cor the
Kingdom Of Heaven"
yes"
'sBut stin you refuse us 3 residence IN
the United States. Now explain that.
"WeIl, you see, We are afraid Il you
60 10 our country to live you viii get
into American politics."
"What Of that 2"
"That would unfit you for the King
dom Of Heaven. ~ philadelphia C1A.
NOT MARRYING THE FAMILY.
Jinks-'Get week of and run down
20 the seashore with me.
Minks-"I can't afford IL
"Oh, pshaw Your income Is bigger
than mine and you have no children
''True; but il takes all can make to
keep things going. My wife's relations
all insist on boarding with me about
half the time.
"Now, see here, Minks, told you long
ago just how Il would be, yet you re-
fused to listen, bat kept saying that you
were not going to marry the whole
family."
''Well, I didn't, either, but the whole
family seems to have married me. -
Philadelphia Call
wHERE THEY GET EnEPHANTs SKINS.
When the elephant Romeo" died In
Chicago some years ago, his skin was
tanned and large piece hangs over q
trunk store on Madison street. Not
long ago, two ladies stopped TO gaze at
it, when one Of them exclaimed:
s'Why, dear me It's On elephants
skin r.
'Oh, myl Il Il possibles" said the
other lady; ''why, how delightful |"
isn't it strange Z" continued the nrst
lady. 81 wonder where they got it.
They don't raise elephants In Chicago,
do they ?"
ooh, dear, no r. said the second lady.
Elephants shed their skins every year,
you know. Shoe and Leather Re.
porter.
THE SOUNDING KIND.
'sDid you catch on to the sound Of
that?" remarked q youth 20 his com.
panion the other evening as o high
sounding kiss was heard coming from
q couple standing In doorway.
well, / should say I did, !" replied
the other.
''It sounded like Q sky rocket had
busted. / guess they must be newly
married couple and they haven't got
through with the honeymoon yet
Honeymoon, thunder You can
just bet on Il they amt married yet
Married kisses don't sound like that;
they amt the sounding kind. - Weekly
Maverick.
m WAS BOSTON NoAfAD.
he was torn and tattered, travel
stained and hungry. BE rang the bell
OF q house which seemed 20 possess
hoapitable exterior. ssMa'am," he said
TO the woman who answered the ring,
I'm just about starved 70 death; haven't
had a bit to eat for . week.
why" asked the woman, s'can't
you get any work ?"
The tramp threw back his head with
impatient disdain. ssBeg pardon" be
said, shut let Us not talk shop"
The woman was 60 taken aback that
Ii her surprise and modification she
shut the door IN his face. - Boston Tran
script
ON A STRIKE.
'sHow are clocks to-day ~ asked q
dude as he stepped into q Superior
street iewelry store and smiled on the
clerk.
The clerk almost tainted under che
dudes nickening grin, but had the
presence of mind 70 cay:
s'Oh they're al on 8 strike
As would be said in novel. Herbert
de Clumsy (the dude) muttered curse
between his zinc stuffed molars and dis.
appeared athwaxt the RlimmerinQ
gloom. Cleveland Plain Dealer.
TIN BAnAUCR on 1RADn.
Nj. Irving ito Miss Andenon)-Yes
America is great country / made many
pleasant friends there.
Miss Anderson Your trip was uuifa
q profitable one, was &c not
Mr.. Irving Fairly so / brought
back about $50. 900.
Miss Anderson Did y0u. indeed
By the why, Mr.. Irving, shan can for
home shortly. ana wish yOu would 1ek
me have the $50. 900. and I win give
you the same amount 81 flve.pound