New-York tribune., 1885-07-25

language for a vent to his emotions force"
unon the resources of his own invention, ne
struck out the above quoted ejaculation, which
NAV lie easily recognized as an agglutination
founded on the Old Version. But the condi-
tions which oppressed him 10 this extent lot
single day have continued in an aggravateu
form now for nearly five months, and have
borne heavily upon thousands OF persplring
workers: workers who are working their Menu
bers of Congress, working the President, work
ing the Departments working their elDows'
working their Jaws. and hoping to work the
Government for all it is worth. They are
working and waiting. And while they are
waiting they are thinking. Thinking or the
prssident. and of the Democratic party, and OF
the hundred thousand offices belonging to the
Democratic party, and the uuaccOuntable delay
IN the distribution. Aud eat many OF the
things they are thinking are unutterable
Unutterable simply because the vocabulary Is
so moor. It needs expansion, If only for them.
For these men are earnest ara eager Inc
Government needs reforming and they have
volunteered to reform it. But instead OF being
nut upon the pay ay-rolls-the only point from
which the lever of reform can be reached-they
are kept waiting in the anteroom. 10 such
men, in such an environment, the narrow I'M
itations to which the vocabulary is ut present
restricted are simply sitting. Only one OF
them, so far as we can learn. has burst the
prescribed bounds and slid down the back slope
of the dictionary. He is religious person (that
is, mildly relgiOus-he is Democrat), who
being asked his opinion Of Cleveland. said with
an infection that cannot be conveyed in print
aOh, he's an aitchofafelar !" Which looks like
another case of agglutination.
In this state of things We say President
Porter and the pathological battaliOns have not
taken hold of the VIC rk of building larger and
more convenient and cOmmOdous dictionary q
minute too soon. 1t is all very well to make IL
one of the requirements of the Civil Service
rules that a man shall talk United States" but
hasn't the United States" a duty to discharge
in the premises A perfectly proper way to
meet the emergency would be for the Govern
ment itself to take the mitter In hand ana issue
an authorized version Of u The United states
and how she is spoke containing all the new
cuss-words and emotional CALCULATIONS neces-
sary to supply the present demand. But there
being no immediate prospect OF that 1t Is well
that private parties have taken hold OF the
business. The new dictionary will be great
boon to thousands of Democrats who for the
past four months have been sitting in the
Department anteroonls, thinking things for
which the present pinched and poverty stricken
vocabulary furnished no outlet 1t may be
necessary to construct one or two words 10 +
the special use of Kentuckians who in tho course
of few days will be walking home. We
suggest that they be firmly built and that there
be no stinting in the use OF consonants. Ihe
Kentucky jaw, accustomed to the mastication
! of nigger.h head" makes no account ot vowcls'
but finds special delight in the craunching
sound that comes from grinding out long rows
| of consonants. The ancient Aztec is q good
source to draw from for this purpose. There
are some words in that tongue which, II they
don't @sparkle forever" on the outstretched
forefinger of all time, are almost long enough
to last forever. Ono or two OF these would
serve a disappointed Kentuckian the purpose
of expressing his emotions almost as well as
double -barrelcd gun.
Besides expanding, the dictionary needs
under this Administration considerable revis-
ing. New definitions are wanted. The Ercnin0
Post of this city has n notable change ia
suggest in the definition of chastity" new
! definition Of =" rascal snDuiu ucsCiiDo ~ "
glance such men as James Russell Lowell. l.. Z.
Morton and John A. Kasson. Higgins should
be consulted rs tn the definition of offensive
partisanship." @Higgins himself also should
| be defined as n generic term, when the Pres
| ident SAYS @This Is case OF Higgins.
Secretary Whitney and AttorDey-Genera
Garland should contribute their new definition
of Contract; and Mr.. George w. Curtis
should be asked to define @reforin in such q
way as to cover the recent Cincinnati appoint
ments. Then there are the old meanings OF
apatriotism," "lOyalty." treason "rebel'
lion," etc., all of which need changing TO sui
the new situation. Oh. there are lots aud lots
of things to be done to the dictionary to adapt
il to the present Administration. And we are
right glad that President Porter and his
assistants have taken hold OF it so promptly
| No Administration ever stood in such sore need
of an enlarged vocabulary and revised dictlon
airy.