The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-04-18
A DEsaonIsso cArAFALouK.
lAlex. E. Sweet, in Tenas siftings.I

The sour oranges and the coffee put a keen edge on our appetites. In fact, the dinner al Mrs. Measly's boarding had the effect of atomic on the appetites of the boardeTs. The only dessert left for us was to desert to the parloF. The s.u- dent, who was studying medicine at Co lumbia college, strolled into the parloT. did the same. We soon became ac-l quainted. He was very pleasant, intel ligens sort of a young man. From the | first remark he made 1 inferred that he was not ashamed of having been born in Boston. He said: @
 "I suppose it is hardly necessary to in form you that l was born and raised within three blocks and a half of the Old South church. There is about every native Bostonian a certain unmistakable nobility of intellect stamped upon his brow that distinguishes him from the common herd and gives him away, no matter where he may be-"
 Did you say you were born in Bos- ton p asked, after examining his brow closely, and failing to discover any stamp of nobility or otherwise. It must have been somewhere else, probably under his clothes on his person that he wore his stamp of nobility.
 On all other topics except the supe- riority of Boston he was perfectly sane, but while conversing about the Hub he never had lucid interval. Having some curiosity to know what particular canker
 worm of care had caused Mrs. Measly's darter" to make such an ostentatious catafalque of herself, asked the Boston student about her.
 "That 'darter' of Mrs. Measly who
 makes such family sepulchre of herself,
 says she is mourning for her father who
 kicked the bucket five or six years ago."
 replied the student.
 "She seems to be very much devoted to
 his memory judging by the expanse of black crape she unfolds, and the dismal
 sarcophagus she makes Of herself at the fa6le d'hofe," was my response. "She does not don those habiliments of woe so much on her fathers account as she does on account of her mother"
 "But her mother is alive"
 "That's just why the daughter dresses . in black and talks so much about the tomb. Mrs. Measly is very live woman, and the 'darter' in order to keep her . from getting married again, acts, dresses, | anu b&lAo dS Il ASL k6tuCL hoQ Vnty ulOu . day before yesterday, and the remains were still in the house on ice. It is very difficult for Mrs. Measly to contract any matrimonial alliances as long as the darter talks about her poor dead pa, and that vacant chair at the dinner
 table"
 "So Mrs. Measly has matrimonial in-
 tentions, has she 2" asked. "Has she? should say she has but
 her darter is equal to the emergency. Whenever the old lady begins to talk about having dreamt of orange blos- soms, then the darter' makes a sacred shrine of the whole house, and suggests
 that her mother amble out into the cem- etery and glance at the sepulchre of poor dead pa."
 "I should think that would be disa- greeable to the gentleman to whom old Mrs. Measly is making love-" "Of course it is. You should have been here day before yesterday, and seen the darter' squelch that parson and Mrs. Measly at the table. The 'darter caught them making sheeps'eyes at each other. Presently the parson said that the flied liver was very good. The darter spoke up and said: 'Mr. Stiggins, you
 are not at all like my poor dead pa, who used to sit in that vacant chair you now occupy You praise the liver, but poor dead pa was always complaining about his liver"
 "That must have been squelcher." "lt was. Mrs. Measly has not had . any more dreams about orange blos- soms since. The parson says now : that he believes in the celibacy of the
 clergy. That very afternoon the darter { festooned herself with about fifteen extra
 yards of black crape, and she brings
 something into the conversation about
 poor dead pa,' even when she has to
 drag it in backwards by the tail. All
 her conversation now is about shrouds and winding sheets, catacombs, knells, msusnto moyi, palls, &c. She was dis nal enough before Mrs. Measly winked at the parson, but now she is whole morgue in herself This boarding-house is a regular circus to a medical student , like me-"
 "I understand now why Mrs. Measly's daughter is in mourning so much.
 supposed at first she owned an interest in
 crape factory and was advertising the
 goods. There is one thing more would
 like to know from you, and that is if all the New York boarding houses are like
 this one."
 Mo-" replied the student; "many of
 them are worse. Living in New York is very much like crossing river on float
 ice. You have to jump from one cake of
 ice to another, or you perish. You must jump from ono boarding house to another,
 or you will starve. Compared with some
 boarding house marms. old Mrs. Measly
 is duchess"
 Just at this moment Mrs. Measly her
 self, who. was probably hunting the par
 son, entered the parlor, and seeing us sitting on the sofa she said with her usual
 musical giggle:
 "Ss you are taking it easy. That's
 right. always make it rule to rest , while after eating full, hearty meal. Almost everybody eats too much, and it relieves that feeling of fullness to rest