Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-01-26
ARTEMUS WARD.


Artemus Ward says a writer in the New
York Graphic. Wewere all intimate friends
but there has been SO much invention and
nonsense written about the latter that al
most tremble to say word lest Z may be
put down among the fabulists. Especially
an Englshman by the name of Kingston,
trusting to his imagination for the facts, and
having been the travelling agent ofArtemus
for while, got out book, in which the
main parts of the great humorists life were
omitted, while other parts were purely i'm
aginary to fill in. The real story of Arte.
mus debut into prominence is this: There
was in 1860 comic paper printed in this
city by two brothers, Stephens, called Yam
ity Fair, which blazed up brilliantly for a
while under literary and artistic genius, but
finally fickered and was likely to expire.
The editorship was offered to me but saw
plainly could do nothing with it. l said
"There are ouly two men in this country
who can do you any good. One is John e.
SAKE, and the other Artemus Ward" At
that time I believed this to be his real name.
"Saxe you can't have, for he is about to run
for Governor of Vermont, so you'd better
get hold of Mr. Ward as quickly as you
can"
My advice was needed, and was asked
if I would write to Artemus and learn his
views. did so to Cleveland, O., and made
him the distinct offer of coming to New
York on salary of $50 per week, and an
increase on the success of the paper. He
was prompt, arriving in New York almost
as soon as his letter Of acceptance. He
afterward told me that he was getting but
$40 per week on The Plain Dealer, and as
sumed the editorial chair of Vanity Fair;
but salt could not save the paper, notwith.
standing its genuine merit. The American
public does not want refined wit, though
since that time they have been partially
educated up to it; they want broad humor
and personal allusion. Punch never did
sell in this country, and if we want any
thug outside of daily paper it must be
cheap and great deal Of it. Witness our
so called literary papers, eight large pages
running six continued stories, for cents.
When Tanity Fair was sure to 20 down
Artemus was very respondent. What
should he do? One day walking up Broad
way said to him, Charley why don't you
lecture ?" Why the idea was absurd. He
could write, but he could not talk; he was
not able to say ten lines on an emergency.
l soon talked him out of that by telling him
that he could read his lecture or commit it
to memory. That point settled, now what
should be his subject? At the time the
canard of the twenty-seveDth street ghost
was in full blast, and suggested ghosts as
subject, knowing that whatever he wrotehe
would make it funny, and before we parted
it was agreed that he should write what he
could on this subject, and on the next even
ing come down to Plaf's, the noted Bohe-
mian resort on Broadway above Bleecker
street, and read it to the party that assem-
bled there every night.
This programme was carried out, and Ar
temus duly appeared with what he called
"a Lecture About Ghosts" and read it amid
uproarious approval, the main fun of which
was that there was not q word in it about
ghosts, and it was settled on all sides that
it must be brought before the public. But
how? There was an actor and occasional
manager at that time playing general utlll-
ty at Walack's theater, the elder OF the
name, on Broadway, near Broome street,
whose name was De Walden. went to
De Walden, whom l knew, and talked Ar
temus to him. He saw it and an introduc-
tion followed. De Walden worked assidu.
ously, and the entire press helped him. Ev-
ery body was friend of Artemus, tor
more genial, jovial, liberal man did not live.
Alas for himself, De Walden took Niblo's
saloon, now the dining room of the Metro
poitau, for one night, with the privilege Of
Six. They ran the six nights, crammed to
the door, and I doubt if ever audience
| laughed before or since as they laughed
that week.
The financial result to Artemus was 81 ,2SO
and Artemus was jubilant. From that hour
his course was one of uninterrupted success
| and lecture after lecture followed, each one
greater than the preceding, and fortune Aow-
ed into the pockets of Artemus.