Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1885-04-02
1irginia fire. gress.
W. w. B. GALLAHER, Editor.
CharIesto,on, Jefferson County, West Va
April 2, 1855.
THE WIT OF WALL STREET.

OF Mr.. Wm. r. Travers, the talented and
genial broker of Wall-street, the New York
Times prints some interesting paragraphs
showing the unvarying cheerfulness of the
millionaire under an affiiction which has
worsted the fortunes and the temperaments
of many men before to-day. We copy a few
of these paragraphs:
\ former acquaintance in Baltimore met
him in Broadway, and, turning aside, began
to chat 18th him.
"You stammer more since you have lived
in New York" ," the friend remarked in the
course of the talk, than you did in Balti
more"
"B-b-bigger place" Travers replied.
The famous Vanderbilt ball exercised ma
ny gentleman on the question of characters
and costumes. Mr.. Clcws was in quanda-
ry, and he applied to Travers fora suggestion
"Clews," he said, after some reflection,
(Clews, by the way, is bald-headed) "why
d-don'ty you sh-sh-ugar coat your h-head and
ego as pill?"
No doubt his most severe remark touched
on the reputation of a well-known lawyer.
While standing at the window of his Office
rravers surprised several friends, who were
chatting at one side, by forcible excama-
ton.
"There" he added quickly and pointing
across the street; there's Stem B-Barlow
with his h-hands in his own p-p-pockets."
At the call of the list in the Stock Ex-
change dispute arose over bid for stock
Mr. II. c. Stebbins is credited with being
the gentleman in opposition to Mr.. Travers
Stebbius asserted that he named the price.
1t may be that Mr. St-Stebbns g-go'
through b-before | did, b-butI'll b-be anged
if l didn't b-begin b-before h-he did" Taav-
ers replied.
Going up town with several brokers, Trav-
ers spied a man selling parrots in front OF
St. Paul's Church.
"H-hold on, boys" he said mysteriously,
"we'll have some f-fun."
Hailing the parrot seller and indicating
one of the birds, Travers asked: "C-can hat
p-parrot t-talk?"
Talk" the man replied with contempt
uous sneer. Z" If he can't talk better than
you can I'll wiring his blasted neck"
"C-come on, b-boys," Travers called out;
"this f-fun is p-post- -roned until another
d-day."
1t has been frequent boast of Mr.. Clews
that he is a self-made man. Travers heard
him on one occasion, and Immediately drop
ped into a sort of reverie with his eyes fixed
on Mr. Clews's bald pate.
"Well, what's the matter, Travers?" Clews
asked, somewhat impatiently.
H-Henry," Travers inquired, "d-didnt
you s-s-say you were a self-made m-man?"
Certainly; l made myself" Clews re-
piled warmly.
Then, when you were ab-b-bout it, why
d-didn't you p-put m-more h-h-hair on the
t-top of your h-head?
AZ desire to reach M-Montague-street,"
he said to passer by. viii you b-be
k-kind enough to p-point the wway2'
You are g-going the wr-wrong w-way,"
was the suffering reply. That is M-Mon-
tague-street."
Are you m-making fun Of m-me, m
mimicking m-me ?" Travers asked sternly
"N-no, assure YOU, Sir" the other re-
piled, with all due haste to repair an appa-
rent lack of good manners. II am b-bad-
ly af-Aict.ficted with an obstruction Of
speech"
"Why d-don't you g-get c-cured p Trav-
ers asked, with mischief in his eyes. &c
90 to DR.. - and you'll g-get c-cured.
D-don't you see how well l talk2 He C.
cured m-me."