The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1885-11-12
A BOOMERANG JOKE.

1--WE were on our wedding trip, Mrs.
Robinson and ], in the Spring of IS
we'll, Mrs. Robinson doesn't like Inc to say
how long we have been married. but it is
several years ago. At that timetraveling
in Europe was hcdgcd n,out with many
difficulties from wch now it is, thank
Heaven, comparrti ely free. Passports
were to be provided. and what not, and In
short it was the end and object of every
petty principality--th was before '66 and
sovereign princes were as plenty as black
berries in mid Europe to make it rs I'M
pleasant as possible for any traveller not
properly accredited to his or their serene
Highness.
However, this has little or nothing to
do with my story which relates exclusive
ly to my experience with the Custom
House officials, exceptit he to explain how
everybody was suspicious Of everybody
else. and where diamond cut diamond was
the order of the day, thieves ana adven-
turers generally passed the frontiers tri-
umphant, while, otherwise, honest fox
frequently paid the penalty Of icing
caught in On occasional breach of the
moralities.
Now, my wife, like all her sex, had pc
culiar notions on the subject OF contraband
goods. She held-in common, am bound
to say, with many otherwise scrupulously
honest folks-that Custom House officials
were only invented for the annoyance Of
travellers, and u such it was not only al
lowable but praiseworthy to circumvent
them in every possible way.
"In short, it was case of all being fair
In love or war; They were there to detect
and prevent the passage ofcertain articles.
1t was obviously the duty of every right
| minded person to resent this arbitrary
conduct on their part by carrying from
one country to another us many OF the
said articles concealed more or less ingen-
iously upon their persons, as the nuture OF
the case permitted.
| ~, on the contrary, not only had seri.
Gus qualms us to the honesty of the pro-
ceeding in question, but being then. as
now, Of a naturally tiInid disposition, l
conceived that the pleasure of evading the
payment of few dollars on piece OF lace
or a box of cigars would be dearly pur
chased by the anxiety which | should en-
dure when perceived the eyes of stern
visaged official iizcd upon me, and fell
that looked Hike murderer. and should
| politely be detained on suspicion, and per
haps searched.
I" Even the tenor Of this last appeal tc
her reason failed TO convince my wife.
80 am sure no one would ever want tt
search me- she insisted. And | really
don't see the harm.
ITO which replied in the words OF q
well-known novelist. that l had newell
known but one woman who could under
stand reason, and she wouldn't listen X
"Well, to make a long story short, we
argued the question out until both OF u.
became quite warm, and ended by abso
lutely forbdding my wife to carry any
thing Of u tontrabund nature on her per
son. She made no reply, AMI ], fond nan
supposed the matter was scii ed hat
only been married few months, and hat
the most absurd ideas-as my wife vii
tell you-on the subject Of duty and obedi
ence, and SO forth. You see did not kno"
the sex.
I'VE had delightful run through Eu
rope without any special disaster, and m!
wife's air OF injured express t
for the most part in very inlitleren
French, but making up in expression wha
IL lacked In idiom-when asked to declare
any dutiable articles, was positively be
yond description.
at was at Brussels l think, that l read
In one of the English papers Of the arres
of two French women ut Dover charged
with smuggling over n quantity of lact
which they had wrapped around their per
son under their clothing, and which wa
only discovered on their Icing searched d,
the officials.
"The writer added that regular corp
of female searchers had been added to thu
, department, and that suspicious charac
, tiers were invited to step in and intervieV
these ladies with q view to vindicatin;
! their appearance or falling under tn
, tenure of the law.
Il showed the paper TO my wife. who's
: only comment was, y. ore fools they.
Il suppose she meant to express her con
tempt for women who were foo ish enou:l
to look suspicious. | thought ut tn. th..
she intended to convey her opinion OF tn
. folly of attempting to outwit her Mos
] Gracious Majestys servants. and felt re
lieved at the idea that my arguments ha'
prevailed upon her at last.