Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-12-22
BRIGHT BITS.

COOKING CLUBS are the fashionable thing
Just now, and a Danvile man wishes the po-
ncemen would cock theirs before they hit him
again with them, 1t would soften them -
Du@0Hts BSeese.
UNCLE MosE-"Lemme 'splain hit ter yer.
DIS heah bucket am lie sun and my head am
de yarf. De bucket, when hit goes round and
round, sheds light on lie inhabitants OBJ my
mead. Does yer understand? Z echdngs.
A NEW SOCK is entitled, "What we Really
Know A bout SnakcsY care" What we really
SNOW about Shakes peare is that he cant
achieve as long a run and draw as big houses
as The 5likado,' or an English balet.--NOr-
rist01N Herald.
WHO He WAs-VIsltor to the dime museum
60 the little girl who takes The cash-"We have
made bet and want you to settle IT. Is the
bearded lady your mother or YOUR aunt?"
Inc lJI grl-"I GU are all wrong. She's
my father. - osgo4s leesdgc'.
IGNATIUs DoNNELLY. the Minnesota states
man 4nd 3uth9r, 42s 9fc2me. disgusted with
git deyotV HI mself . . iterStpre.e On some
ACCOUNTS we wpuld wish 10 see the profession
Of politics. less fmmoral.-Puck. ~
w1rt-'I must get the chifdreh some hnsey
I woosey forwiDtef wear" Hasband-''W hat,
taat 0iue-looklng s1uff:H Wife J o." Hus-
linsey woolsey. You'd can the red aoking stuff
Lirdlpal WOlsey, wouldn' t yOn:" -4srkansaao
Trader.
l. MHEN NJ Maurice VignauX was asked his
opinion OF the great billiard tournament at
ChiGagos ne replied: eSee here. = saire, / will
tqly"hzis: sehafrre he ~ a arteest. and
am an arteest. but SiOssong-Vell, Monsieur
SlOssot z, lie Is One-whaC you eall him -One
butehaIreM- It'd Bits. 80 4Lg8a
ACCOMPLISHMENTS Don't tell me!
4 A9seIiea a.. Is Iar behind Europe. Why, sir;
fBagey-sWelk what Of Ffancep'Ha<
PoaspDbY-'Weil siri even 7, he lttle chill
9Eeq s, teece can can spttaA ,Erepch, I'd da2ted
FfofT Sf6@s3 S7iSA ty-the PhitddsLDhiG CAL.
IT IS a good thing to write newspaper
articles on hOusehO economy. IL is easily
shown that. by strict abstinence and leaving
ui- children to the care of his nGlghbors. al
most any American can have enough to eat
aud the means TO put hlmee { up frame cot
tase for the assessors TO come and look at
twice year. -LettiyoiHs COurIey-J0urn0I.
A YACHTING ITEM.
Time flies: The yachting seasons past
The German schooner's locked at last,
As yachts IN the winter are,
And with laughter merry
The Tom and Jerry
40 IsipuOted over the bar.
flulG JET VHHTlll EPegpl Courier.
20, where sre the girls OF the past, he sighed,
with agurgle down deep ~ his throat.
On whom We were wont to dotesn
And, 10 tlde his griei, he went 10 the show,
~ Hisdroaplng heart "a rally; -
ana ne saw the girls OF the long ago
Cavortlng n tue ballet.
= 9 ---G1ieag0 Tribune.
OVERHEARD IN an elevated train.
DIS was m klngIup to-a. very plain girl.
He-'3 s harley Pirg9ksy you mightgpretty."
She-"Shut upII3l.v 4rU
| he He said g: lapyhow5' M
She--Shnt up" arT sTFrH
He--,I think 60 too" c.Tt I.iI
She softly i-,'Hus-s.sh.n 81 ~
They got of at Grand streetin Almost loving
way.-Neto York Starr a -UEe
7 THEY had looked over the splendid dwelling
/ and groRnas. and were aboutt0 depart, when
/ one Oh the ladies sAid: s.Wef, Mrs. Blank,
7 we heartily congratulate You upon the pos
! session Of such a beautiful home. 7 suppose
| the deed lin Iionr DarneFnf ooh, no. no! MY
husbsnd lid think of that at the start, bat
afterw rts came to the conclusion that we
would hold it together. It isn't 80 much
trouble to mortgage it that way, you know"
-Wd0 Street NeDs.
| NEW YORK merchant advertised for a
cashier A well-dressed gentleman applied
| for the position. The merchant looked over
! his references and said: your credentials
are excellent, but would like 10 ask you a
question"
Certainly, sir.
"Have you been vaccinated?"
"les. sir"
THAT will do. We have no use for your
/ services. The only cashier who can be relied
on to any extent whatever Is the one who is
| afraid OF the Canadian small poX.-Nelo York
SIN.