davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29
T N. WHEAT, N. D.,

UDHEUPA IXfI1 PHYSICIAN & SURGEON
Special attention given to the diseases Of women
and children Office and residence opposite
Congregational church, corner st. Paul and Mill
streets, Austin, Mower comfy, MINI.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29

T NJ. GREENMAN,
ATTORNEY AT LAW
Will practice in the courts OF record and the L.
$. courts. Once in Schlcuder's block, Main
street, Austin, MINI. dolly
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29
I Obj s. CONKLIN,
BARRIERS AND HAIR DRESSER.S,

At their new Tonsorial Parlors. Shower and Hot
Baths. We have two frst-class bathrooms.
Basement Dunkelmann's block, Main street,
Austin. MINI.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29
nRNANZO ALLEN,

JL1DGE or PROBATE,
Attorney at Law and Real E.tate Agent. Col
lcctions made and Taxes paid. Office in Court
house, Austin, Minnesota. 39-tf
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29
DENTISTRY,
DIR. Z. B. PECK

Has opened an Office in Mrs. Wrights house, first
North Of the Davidson lIouse, on east side OF
street, where he is prepared to do all kinds Of
work in dentistry, and solicits share Of public
PATRONAGE
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29

ATTORNEY At Law,
And lcnl Estate Agent. Collections made and
taxes paid.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29
RECENT APPOINTMENTS.

RECENT APPOINTMENTS.
July 20th Jas. A. Munday of Kentucky
and Clay Taylor of Missouri we're appointed
special agents for the general land Office,
and several assistant appraisers of mer-
chandise for the district of New York
Among large number of postmasters in
all sections of the country, was the appoint
ment of s. N. Hornecke at Detroit City,
Minnesota, vice c. W. Dix, suspended and
E. A. Vandyke at Eagle Bend, Todd Co.,
MINI.
The following appointments have been
made: Bismarck, Dak.-C. A. Lounsberry,
postmaster; G.. T. Hughes, superintendent
of mails; A. j. Conover, delivery clerk.
At Helena, Mont.-P. II. Cuthbert, post
master; R. P. Burden, assistant postmas-
ter; William Bishop, delivery clerk.
Capt. Thos. Burns of Galena, ILL.,, has
been appointed inspector of hulls for the
5th inspection district, vice Geo. W. Cor
don, removed. The place is worth $4,000
per year.
B. D. Graves has been appointed post
master at Bon Homme, OAK, G.. W. He'd
drick at Buford, Dak., and George J. Love
at Huron OAK, vice John Coin, suspended.
c. F. Macdonald, editor of the St. Cloud
Times has beenappointed receiverof the St..
Cloud Land Office, vice W. B. Mitchell, ed
itor of the Journal-Press removed.
Barton Atkins now of Elmira, New York,
but recently Of st. Paul, Minn., has been
appointed U. s. Marshal for the district of
Alaska
T. E. Bowen of the Sleepy Eye (Minn.) }
Herald, has been appointed deputy revenue
collector by Mr.. Bierman.
Geo. II. Haskell has been appointed post
master at Larimore, D. T., vice L. P. Good
hue, resigned.
Herbert G. Tasgow has been appointed
postmaster at Hawley, Mimi, vice G.
Chant, removed.
P. c. Elliott has been appointed post-mas-
ter at North Freedom, Wis.
Horace Jennings has been appointed lndi-
an agent at Green Bay, Wis.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1885-07-29
BUSINESS CARDS.

BUSINESS CARDS.
I Obj 6 coSK11S'
BARBE1S AND HAIR DRESsERS,
At their new Tonsorial Parlors. Shower and Hot
Baths We have two frst-class bath rooms.
Basement Dunkelmann's block, Main street,
Austin, MINI.
DENTISTRY
DIR. Z. B. PEC'K
Has opened an Office in Mrs. Wright house, first
porth OF the Davidson IIouse, on east side OF
street, where he ig prepared to do all kinds Of
work in dentistry, and solicits share Of public
patronage.
r N. WHEAT, NJ. D.,
HO.nEuPAIYIC PHY,sICIAN & SURGEON
Special attention given to the diseases Of women
and children. Office and residence opposite
Congregational church, corner st. Paul and Mill
streets, Austin, Mower comfy, MINI.
OHHASzo ALLEN
JLDGE or PROBATE,
Attorney at Law and Real Estate Agent. COL
lcctions made and Taxes paid. Office in Court
house, Austin, Minnesota. 39-tf
TTlHos. PHILLIPS, M. D.,
HONlEOPAJYIC PHYSICIAN Il SURGEON,
Has permanently located in Austin. Calls in city
or country promptly attended to at all hours.
Office and rooms in Scheuder's block, first door
north OF Mower County Bank. ~ Electric
baths given at the Office.
4 w. ALLEN, NJ. D.,
PXYSILIAN AND IgUNGEON
Office over solncr's store, Austin, MINI.
Office hours from to II a. m, and from 3 to
p. IN.
!. M. cKEES"AS'
ATTORNEY AT Law,
Will practice in the courts OF record and the Z.
$. courts. Once in Schcuder's block, Main
street, Austin, MINI. dolly
JOHNSON Il PIERCE,
AT2VRNEYS Ar LAW,
Austin, MINI. Practice in all the courts OF the
state. Prompt attention given to collecting
ONCE over DuHkclmannB store. juno
I YMAN d. BAIRD,
ATIUR.NEY Ar LAW,
Real Estate, Insurance and Collection Agent.
Oncc, front room, second floor, over Hall & Vests
store, Austin, Minnesota.
7 ,AFAYETTE FRENCH,
ATTORNEY Ar LAW
Austin, MINI. Collections and other business
attended to carefully and promptly. Agent OF
the 1Itna and other Fire Insurance companies
ONCE over G. w. Taylors store. juno
II Is. CRANE,
ATJURNEY Ar Law,
Real Estate and Collection Agent Taxes paid
for non-rcsdcnts. W Office, second floor of
Dunkcmann's new block, Main street. 10-tf
~ NJ. CAMERON,
ATTORNEY At LAW
And Rcnl Estate Agent. Collections made and
taxes paid.
, 1885-01-21

who was surrounded by a galaxy Of bril-
liant lawyers. Now, look-a-hear, Judge,
replied the prisoner. with a look at his
array Of counsel, "ain't you pretty hard
on me2 know a man Is Judged by the
company he keeps, but you must under
stand that l don't keep this kind Of com
pany when I'm Free KnksTs States
man.
A man doesn't care how intelligent his
dog is, but there are a great many things
he doesn't want to have his wife know.
He remembers that Solomon said. "He
that iacreaseth knowledge increaseth sor-
row. but he is perfectly reckless as to
consequences so far as his dog is con-
cerned. -Boston Transcript
II hear you are without a preacher
over in your congregation. ''Yes; he
left two weeks ago." Had a call at a
higher salary, 1 presumed" Not as /
know Of" Health failed him, ~perhaps2"
mo; his health seemed to be good
Congregation didn't like his preaching,
them YES; they seemed to. well,
then, he resigned2" "No-not exactly.
Fact was, he uploaded a lot of railroad
stock on US at "a; and the shrinkage, to-
gether with some talk about tar and
feathers, took him out Just as the stock
touched ST. Val Street Nelcs.
, 1885-01-21

llcrdldu mtulAtol-ArU u. VI
When a youn man finds that he has given
expression to a pun he should take a piece Of
assafetida about as big as a hickory nut and
chew IT. He will not feel like making another
pun as long rs the taste Of the drug remains
in his mouth. He should carry some of the
drug in his vest pocket when he goes out in
company, and keep a piece in his mouth con-
SANITY. 1t may be offensive to the company,
but it will not DO half offensive as his old
back number, teeth-worn puns, and he will
become a favorite. II this course will not
cure him he had better go and drown
himself.
There is no such thing as a new pun, as
avery word hat is susceptible to a pun has
been punned for thousands Of years, so when
you hear a person make a pun you can be
sure that it is a thousand years old. II a
man or woman when making a pun ON a
word realized that the Egyptian mummy in
the museum when alive had made the same
pun and laughed at it boisterously, he would
be ashamed OF his own attempt. The Persian
language Is good enough il you take it
straight, and it is foolish to torture it The
man who makes puns habitually is usually a
weak man, who imagines he Is smart, as you
can sec by watching him as he laughs at his
own smartness.
AS good Il way as any to squelch a punster
Is to listen to his pun, look thoughtfully and
say Before the Flood, " or Credit to ADAM
Young men who get in the habit Of making
puns on all occasions lose their positions,
girls go back on them and they go through
life alone, except In rare instances. A girl
hates to face the prospect OF q lifetime OF
poor puns, and will think twice before
marrying a punster, as he is liable to practice
bis puns on his wife.
, 1885-01-21

Inter ocean "Curbstone Crayons.'l
"A good many years ago" put in a news
paper man who had listened with a smile, 81
met old Col Harris, the contemporary of
Orange Judd in the agricultural paper bust
moss, under peculiar circumstances. A crowd
of forty thousand people had been scattered
by a sudden and furious burst of rain. There
was small shelter on the grounds and the
drenched people streamed away toward the
city like an army in a panic Going over
the deserted grounds toward the grand stand
l found Colonel Harris the solitary occupant
of the pagoda. l laughed at the Rip Van
Wrinkle loosoness of his makeup, and asked
him What he had in mind.
az was calculating he said, the amount
Of dimity destroyed or spoiled by that rain
storm. / estimate from careful observation
nat there were 10000 women and girls here
when the storm burst. Five thousand Of
them wore white dresses, all OF them their
best clothes, including nets, collars, stockings
and shoes You wet a man down and he is
up again as soon as he is dry. But you wet
n woman in ruffles and frills, and in the
freshness and prettiness that go with cleanli-
ness and starch, anu she is sick abed on the
instant. l ave just been thinking OF the
laundry bills Weighted with misery that will
follow as the result of the storm
az have figured out that 1900 dresses and
10. OOO bonnets were ruined by the first five
minutes Of rain. Then 1900 other dresses
and 5000 bonnets were deprecated in value
so to rs per cent and 20, 600 white skirts, 40
900 stockings, and 40, 600 shoes were rendered
useless for the day. The loss in money was
great, the loss in comfort greater. and the
strain ON nerves was simply tremendous, for
there is no sorrow like that OF a shipwrecked
sailor on a desolate island or a woman be-
dragged, drenched, and helpless in a rain
storm IN
, 1885-01-21

A wild looking man who rcsembled one
who had wrostled with misfortune in a catch
as-catoh-can hold and been thrown in the
contest, went into n Woodward avenue bird
store tho other day and approached che affa-
bio proprietor.
aLook here" he said, may I take you
apart for n momentf' .
Certainly replied the man of animals,
III you can put me together again"
swell. here's a letter from my wife-say,
como out and have somethingf
They went and had something: when they
came back the Withholding man resumed the
letter. ''She writss me- he continued, ito
get her a white canvas-back dog in crossoH
Now you 60" said the man severely.
business is business, and I've no time TO fool
away"
He sat down ON the curbstone TO rest. He
was still reading the letter when n sympa-
taetic lady stopped TO look at him
Poor man, are you illf' she asked kindly.
@Hoaven bless you, madam, read that
letter. II you can and win, l am a'saved
man"
Tie lady took tho letter as If she were
humoring the whim Of a ~lunatic, and ran II
over. .."
at is easy enough to read," she said.
@Your wife, who seems to be an excellent
woman, wishes you TO buy her a white dog
in cross-stitch, stamped on a canvas splasher,
with crowels to finish IL and send by express
at once. I'm sure there's nothing about it
that isn't plain enough"
Thank you, ma'am- I'll never forget your
kindness. Where did you say the cross
stitched dog ON canvas could be found r.
AT any art-embroidery store" and the
lady Walked away, remarldng soto voce:
"Of all stupids, men are the stupidest Not
TO know what cross-stitch isi'
, 1885-01-21


so much depends for effect on the sur.
roundings. W. D. Howells went past. He
was rather stout and ordinary Ia appear.
ance, with nothing to p~articularize. Among
the throngs on Broadway, 10 was not deemed
worth looking at, until the spectator was
told that he was the noted novelist re-
called having once called on him in Boston,
when he was editor Of The Atlantic maya
zine. He then sat behind a desk OF immense
size and solidity. In various ways he had the
aspect Of an autocrat A number OF authors
were in an ante room waiting TO got an audi
ence His slightest word of encourage
ment delighted tho fresh aspirant, and his
faintest expression OF a disapproval had a
correspondingly depressing effect 1t seemed
as though the success or failure Of them all
depanded on his nod. I~recountel this to my
companion when Howells walked by.
@Well, now, " was the reply, Il can give q
contrasting view. Did you notice the small
package under his armi That contains the
manuscript of a comic opera. He is now in
just exactly tho same position which you
have described to me as that OF tine writers
who were submitting their work to him as
an editor. He is engaged in going a round
OF the theatres, trying TO get some manager
to accept and produce a piece which he has
written"
, 1885-01-21

-
DR.. Susan Edison, who attended Gem Gar
field all through his last illness and who had
been for years an attendant upon the family,
was in tho White House for several weeks be.
fore the assassination. She was there fer tfs
purpose OF looking after Mrs Garfield,
who was very m at that time. Con. Gar
fields mother was summoned during this ILL.,
ness OF Mrs. Garfield. When the latter be-
gan to grow better "Grandma Garfield"
made roady TO go home. When tho time
came for her togo she seemed oppressed with
u great melancholy. She was 20 unusually
sad at tho prospect Of parting with her son
that he put his arm around her and in his
most cheerful way tried to comfort her.
While he was engaged in comforting her
his wife began TO urge him 10 accept an In
v~itation he had TO go down the river for n
short trip. His wife insisted that he needed
the rest aud, as she was out Of all danger,
she would be better pleased TO AVE him go
than not Grandma Garfield here spoke up
and said. HOh, James, don't goi Pm so
afraid you will be shot II you go away from
here now 1t was this fear that has made
her so sad at tho parting with her son, as 1t
afterward appeared for the last time. Tho
last thing she said 10 her son before
going away was TO urge upon hin the neces-
sity Of using great precautions against the
danger OF sbeing shot by some secret enemy.
Her fears, however, a no impression on
Gen. Garfeld's mind.
Grandma Garfield, since her sons death,
has given herself up to brooding over his
memory. She spends the entire day in read
ing over his letters to her, and does not APP
pear to care to talk about anything else but
hor SON
, 1885-01-21
BANCROFT, THE HISTORIAN


A Pen Picture Of the Venerable Writer
An Active Old Man.
Washington Cor. New York World.l
Bancroft, the historian. is ons OF the most
noticeable figures in Washington society
The remarkable preservation OF his vigor at
the advanced age Of "a years, Is what makes
him tho most interesting. He Is not the
most charming conversationalist In the
world He fairly roars as he talks BE Up
pears always as IL he were addressing some
one a dozen yards away. He shouts several
sentences at a friend In this high key and
then without waiting or listening to anyone
else no moves TO address someone else. He
calls as much as tho most active society
young man. He darts In and out OF the
leading houses of the town with a light skip
that is almost offensive In its oxubornnt
agility. This veteran still has a slim, erect
figure. His legs are straight. There Is no
weakness there. He holds himself together
wit all that goes to make a good military
set-up. He Is especially agile In the pres.
ence Of ladies, and under the inspiring glance
Of a lovely society bud, the veteran curvets.
SHES and skips with the lightsome grace OF
some Of the t~horoughbreds ho has been 80
fond Of riding in the past.
This Is n picturp of him as l saw him the
other day. He sat in a low, easy pony
phaeton drawn by a stout black horse, wear
ing "A plain, unornamented harness Just
back Of him IN tho rumble sat his favorats
colored groom, who held the reins over the
historians left shoulder. The old man wore
a dark-blue mtrimmed Prussian officers
cap pulled well down upon his cleaning
eyes, looking out through a huge pair OF
round, heavily gold-mounted glasses resting
upon a real hawk nose. A snowy-whfte,
silky muatachs and beard brought out his
fresh color, and stood out in strong contrast
with the dull black of his heavy pilot-cloth
overcoat, while about his legs was an afghan
of rcd, black, and yellow worzteds. 1t was
a warm, sunny day. His horse logged along
with a steady gait, while the veteran roared
a soliloquy at his servant about his calling
places. The man leaned forward deterrent
tally and superintendent the calling list.
When he said stop the veteran would throw
aside his afghan and skip up tho steps, SEEM
ing to restrain himself by an effort from
turning handsprings on his way
Mr.. bancroft lives a very regular life, and
as be has always taken a great deal Of out
door exeroise, it Is not hard TO account for
his long life. Ho has never burdened him
self with work. He has been all his long
life writing a history that could nave been
written IN ten years with moderate labor.
One page Of manuscript a day OF $50 words
ho regards as a good days work Mr.. Blaine,
his fellow-historlan, a man in the full vtgor
of his life. regards 1000 words a day as all
any man can DO expected to do well for n
period OF protrActed work. Think OF this,
OH merciless editors, who crack the whip
over Newspaper reportersi
, 1885-01-21
CHIT CHAT.

There is one thing at least that can be
said of the hog-he has small fset.-Ker-
fudky State Journal.
The CANNES probably got their bark
wien somebody threw physie to the
dogs '-Bosfon Bulletin.
Il do love dressf' exclaimed a young
society belle. Then l should think you
would wear more Of it. replied the cyni-
cal bachelor friend of middle ags.-Bmr-
lla0ton Free Press.
A Louisville man was yesterday ar
rested for stealing a hot stove. 1t is little
incidents like this which serve to recall
the halcyon days of the golden past,
when the Republican party was in the
full tide Of its power and glory. -Loms-
sfH Coivie-Jonrnai.
Il find you guilty Of robbery. and viii
give you two years in the state prison, -
s4id the austere Judge TO the prisoner.
, 1885-01-21
A Persistent Roporter.


NEW YORK irlpune-I
Ex-Speaker Colfax tells me Of a Chicago
reporter who takes a cap sheaf for persist
ence. aMy signature said Mr.. Colfax,
was hardly on the hotel register before this
young man asked for an interview. l begged
for time to remove tho CRIME of travel As
l came down with my wife TO go to tine
theatre, he stopped me again, but Of course l
asked to be excused 1t was after II o clock
when we returned from the play. Our room
was pretty high up in the hotel Next to it
in tho corridors was q little recess or alcove.
Planted in that alcove with a table and
chair, l found the reporter. He was very
polite and suave, said he had desisted from
pressing me until all my engagements OF the
day were over, but now hoped / would give
him a few minutes Well, l couldn't resist
that, and after l had escorted Mrs. Colfax to
our room 1 came a and accommodated
him
, 1885-01-21

Theron P. Keator, editor of Fort
Wayne, Ind, Gazette" writes: For
the past FIVE years / have always used DR..
Kings New Discovery for coughs of the
most severe character, as well as those of
a milder type. 1t never fails to effect a
speedy cure. My friends to whom | have
recommended il speak of ii in the same
high terms. Having been cured by it of
every cough I have had for FIVE years, /
consider it the only reliable and sure CURE
for Coughs, Colds, etc. Call at Gray &
Peares's Drugstore and get a Trial
Bottle. Large Size BLOC.
, 1885-01-21

On the car drivers and conductors Don't
order them about, or speak harshly 70
them. They are overworked and under
paid men, exposed to all sorts of weather
and to everything calculated to rob them
of their health. They suffer from rheu-
matism. neugalgia, liver complaint, and
sometimes from general prostration.
Browns Iron Bitters is the very thing for
them. DR.. G. N. Robertson Of Elm
Grove. n, O., says, II prescribe Browns
Iron Bitters. and find it all it Is recon-
mended to be- 1t cures dyspepsia, weak
ness, and malaria.
, 1885-01-21

A Life Unworthy Of Emulation. and a
sad Ending.

From the Chicago Herald.
The death of the Earl Of Aylesford,
which is announced, closes a career that
has been anything but a successful or
honorable one. As the heir Of the Ayles-
ford estates this young man early in life
took a conspicuous position among the
royalty and nobility Of England. He was
a companion of the Prince Of Wales in
most of his youthful escapades and ac-
companied that worthy to India. On his
return Aylesford was married to one of
the most beautiful and amiable young
ladies in the kingdom, the daughter of a
member of parliament not Of the nobility.
For a time, the young earl abandoned his
evil associates, but he returned to them
again. His wife then fell under the in
huence Of the disreputable Marquis of
Blandford, now the Duke of Marlborough,
and finally eloped with him to Paris, liv-
ing with him there for years as his wife.
This and financial misfortune seem to
have sobered A~ylesford. He brought
suit for divorce and would have been
given an unqualified decree if his own
record could have been made to appear
less repulsive. An order of separation
was granted, and Aylesford was enjoined
10 pay his wife n sum Of money each year
so long as she RETAINED from "molesting"
him. After this unhappy scandal his
great estate passed into the hands Of a
conservator, and taking an annuity Of
$50, 600, the earl came to America broken
in health and spirit. Presently he pur-
chased a ranch Of 40, 200 acres in Texas,
but returning to England he found that a
still more painful humiliation was in store
for him. Hs wife had a son by the
Duke Of Marlborough whom she had
dubbed Lord Guernsey, a title rightfully
belonging to the Aylesford family and
worn usually by prospective heirs to the
earldom. He began an action against her
for molestation, and. after a trial which
did more than anything else Of recent
years to show the utter infamy of the
English nobility, the court held that her
action in calling her son by that title came
under that head, and that she was no
longer entitled 10 receive an annuity from
her late husband. Thrown then upon
her own resources she disappeared in
Paris.
The earl of Aylesford visited Englanda
faw montha a0o 70 YnoLo eon,a orran0a-
, 1885-01-21

The following treatment has been used
extensively during the past ten years with
out q single failure, which ought to be
sufficient TO commend il to universal favor
and adoption: Give Chamberlain Cough
Remedy and observe the directions with
each bottle. 1t acts quickly and can al
ways be depended upon. Remember that
hoarseness is the first symptom of true
Group, and if Chamberlain Cough Rem
edy is freely given from the time
the child first becomes hoarse it will
prevent the Group and all danger and anx-
iety may be avoided. Sold by Hunt &
Whipple-