The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1885-02-12
MIKES SIGNS.
How Mike and the French Professor DIS
-agreed-One Pleased the Other



The writer heard the following story
few evenings since. 10 him IL was
very amusing. as well "a good Illus
tration of the aptness of different minds
to miseonstrue the same facts IN quite
opposite directions.
Some time ago learned Frenchman
became very enthusiastic on the subject
of a universal language for the human
race. After much thought and theoriz-
ing on the subject he came to the con-
clusion that the only language that
could be universal at the present day
must be language of signs. Being
deeply impressed with the imporiance
of this language to humanit:, lac d'-
1ermined TO travel from country To
country and teach it in all their col
leges and universities.
As it happened, the first country he
reached in his travels was Ireland. Ind
the first university he went to was The
University of Dublin.
He called upon the president of tha
university, and after some converSa-
tion with him asked him if he had
professor of signs in his univer-
sity. Now there was no professor
of signs in the university, but the
president, not wishing to be be-
hind the learned Frenchman, told
him that he had one The Frenchman
asked 10 be introduced to him. The
president was taken aback at this, but
toli him that he could not see the pro-
fessor that day. but if he would call the
next uay at the same hour he would in
troti;.ce him.
After the Frenchman had gone, the
president called his professors together
and told them the fix he was in, and
told them that one OF them must play
the part of professor Of S gns next day.
They all demurred and objected to this,
being afraid thy might be caught Ly
the Frenchman.
As none of them was willing to play
the part, they at last decided TO train
Mike, the choreman. for it. Mike had
lost an eye and was very sensitive about
| it, thinking that people were constantly
noticing it and making illusions to it.
Mike was consulted. aud consented
to play the part. providing that the
| Frenchman should not refer to his de-
! feet.
| The next day the president and pro-
fessors dressed Mike up in good suit
of clothes, took him to recitation
room, seated him alone on the plat
| form, and then retired, for the French.
man was to see him alone. Before
they left him they told him what to do,
and that he must not speak.
He replied. 'Sure III not, if he seq
nothin' about me eye"
At the appointed time the French.
man called, and was nshered into the
.srecitation-room of the professor ol
signs" The president and professors
| waited in an adjoining room anxiously
for the result. In short time the
| Frenchman came back 10 them, appar.
emily much pleased.
"How did YOU like our professor oi
| signS?' inquired the president.
Very much indeed. congratulate
you on Your able professor. am
more than ever convinced that the Ian.
guage of signs is TO be the universal Ian.
guage When | went into the room
held up one finger, meaning there j,
one God. He understood me at once
and held mp two fingers, meaning Fa
ther and Son. then held up three
gers, meaning there are three persons
in the Trinity. He replied by doubling
up his hand. meaning, And these thret
are one. then Withdrew. 1t is Won
derful' | am delighted.
After the Frenchman had gone. The
president and professors sent in haste
for Mi e. for though they were pleased
at having gotten out of the dilemma
they were very anxious to hear Mike's
account of the interview. Mike came
in. very angry. 81 tould yez he woulC
say something about me oye. The frs
thing he did was to hold up wan finger
m' amin had one oye."
What did You do then, Mike?
asked the president.
.Sure I held up me two fingers. til
let him know had two fists: an pha
does the durty blackguard do bat houl'
up three fingers. m'anin' we had bu
three Dyes betwane us. Thin doubled
up me fist and would "a guv the fro"
ATTN varmint welt over his Oyc, hu
he COMMUNIST a-smilin' an a bowen an
a-scrapin'. an wint out iv the th
room. ."-Editor's DraUer, IN HnipcF''
Magazine FIR February.