Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1885-04-02

how he dared to cheat and deceive him so
''Head work, Governor, head work." was
the reply.
ity, the governor freely forgave him.
THE PENALTY OF ScEPTICIsM.-"Come
mighty nigh killin' fine buck dis maWn-
in'," said an old negro.
"Comin' long through the woods an er
old buck he jump up an bookerty, booker
ty he run off few yards an stop still.
Come in one er shootin' him, sah."
"Why didn't you shoot?"
"Didn't hab my gun wild me, sah."
''Then how did you come in one of shoot
ing him?"
Cease, sab, I come in one O. taking my
gun wild me-"
= ."Why didn't you take your gun?'
"Did'nt hab none, sah."
"Youare an old fool"
sLook heah, doan' buse er man dat way
when yer amt got no cause. amt got no
gun, for feller dat l wuz erbout to buy
one frum, axed me jes' one dollar mon l
could pay. So l come in one o. gittin' de
gun. IfI'd er got it would er TUX it long
wild me, an eff I'd er had it I could er shot
de buck easy, sab. So doan come 'roun'
'busin er man when de facks is all ergin yer.
I hab knowed folks to fetch trouble on dar
Selves dat way. Err pusson oughter be
keerful in dis hear worl o. science an
speckerlation. Good mawning, sab. Since
yer's acted dis way, l wouldenter gin yer
none o. de meat eff had er killed it. Fore
yer talked dat way I woulder made yer
present o. some o. de buck. See whut yer
got by it, sah."
PAID THE DEBT.-The following true in
cident was published by the local papers
years ago, but being true, and having been
crushed to earth, rises again:
In Van Buren, there once lived an OLD gen
tleman of the name of John Bostick. He
kept a hotel and was also proprietor OF
Rev. Mr.. Buchanan, who always put up
with Bostick, met the hotel man on the
street one day, after having staid all night
with him, and said:
"Uncle John, how much do l owe you"'
''Owe me for what, Brother Buck 2"
"Why, you know have staid all night
with YOU"
eyes, Brother Buck, but you know I new
er charge preachers"
II know that, Uncle John, but had my
horse shod."
'Brother Buck, Inever charge preacher
for shoeing his horse" =,
II don't want work done for nothing" I"
said the preacher.
"Well, Brother Buck, just remember me
in your prayers"
'sAll right, Uncle John, but as have al
ways adhered to the rule of never leaving a
place in debt, get down on your knees and
We'll have prayers right now"
The two men knelt on the sidewalk and
the debt was paid.-Arkansaao Traveller.
AN HONEST BoY.-A large class of schol-
ars were standing up to spell. A hard word
was missed by the scholar at the head of the
class, until the last scholar, a little fellow,
spelled the word and went ''up to the head"
passing above seventeen boys and girls, all
older than himself.
The teacher then turned around and wrote
the word on the blackboard, so that all might
see it and remember how to spell it.
No sooner had she written the word out,
than the little boy at the head exclaimed:
"Oh, didn't say it so Miss W; l said
e instead off," and he walked to the foot of
the class again, quicker than he went to the
head. That was an honest boy, but he will
never be Congressman.
Too GOOD FOR \ CLERK.-Dry Goods
Merchant sir, you think you could
learn to become salesman ~
"Yes, sir.''
"Well, suppose you were waiting on that
man and his wife over at the lace counter.
What would you do first?"
'"I should hold up the best piece of lace
in the stock, and ask the man if he didn't
think it becoming to his daughters style of
beauty:"
"Well, what then?"
'Oh, nothing. The woman would take
care of the res&of it,"
''Young man, don't want you for clerk.
l want you for a partner"
ALL IS NOT GOLD THAT GLITTERs.-"Ise
very sorry, boss, dat / was led estray to
take de watch" said Jim Webster to an
Austin justice.
"I am glad to see that you regret your
crime. What was it that led you to take
the watch ?" replied His Honor, calmly.
II was deluded by de chain, sab. Ibleev-
ed it was solid gold chain, and dat ar was
q gold watch hanging at de eend of it. DE
chain deluded me, sab, inter takin' de watch.
De brass chain am de cause OBJ all desc heah
complercashuns."
"You will not be deceived by chains for
a time at least, if can help it," remark
ed His Honor, giving him two months on
the chain gang.
pap A German clergyman, who was trav-
cling, stopped at hotel much frequent
ed by wags and jokers. The host, not be-
ing used to having clergyman at his table,
looked at him with surprise. The guests
used all their artillery Of wit upon him
without eliciting a remark. The cler-
gyman ate his dinner quietly, apparently
without observing the gibes and sneers of
his neigbors. One of them at last, in despair
of his forbearance, said to him: "Well,
wonder at your patience! Have you not
heard all that has been said to you?" "Oh,
yes, but 1 am used to it. | am chaplain of
a lunatic asylum. Such remarks have no
effect upon me-"
DOMESTIC INTELLIGENCE.-A Dallas ser
want girl walked into her mistress parlOr,
and said to the latter:
"I wish you would give me a certificate ;
| wish to leave"
s'Give you certificate Why, you lazy,
worthless creature, what sort of certificate
do you expect from me? You don't expect
me to say that l am satisfied with you:'
go, no, would not have you say that for
the world That might get me in trouble.
All want you to certify is that held out in
your house for three whole weeks. Every
body knows what sort of a woman you arc,
and that will be the best certificate l could
possibly have"
ng@ A farmer who had engaged the ser
vices of a son of the Emerald Isle sent him
out one morning to harrow a piece OF GROUND; q;
He had not worked long before nearly all
the teeth came out of the harrow. Present.
ly the farmer went out into the held TO take
notes of the mans progress, and asked him
how he liked the work. "Oh!" he replied,
lit goes a bit smoother since the pegs have
come outw