New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1885-02-02
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TIE TALK or THE DAY.

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Wisconsin Is taking prominent position ano az tn
| tobacco growing States.
The Salvation Army the other day visited the onIcs a
The Pyordsqce and through the knee drius
Mr. White endured 1t with Astounding good nature and
still publishing his excellent paper
1t seems that there are Carnegie Socialists Professor
op OF srn u aa e
ety. 1t Is surmsed that Carnegie Socialist Is real
Is your father Christian Johnny !" asked the ns~
minister on, yes sir; SAID Johnny confidently
Carnegie Socialists get fairly organized they should ally
themselves with society for reforming MANKIND by
passing prohibitory awsTBuffao Express
The Rev. DR.. W. NJ Taylor says that missionary On
the Western frontier writes the American Congregs
tional Union that accommodations 80 scarce In thu
where he stationed that he has to three miles
out of the village and sleep Ia "corn-shack" ~
asked what that was" says Dr. Taylor and the answ
that it principally remarkable for Its ventiatna
qualities. You will understand that remark" DIR. Tay
Tor tells his congregation, "when inform you that
shack is made Of panks put together about two
inches apart, to ventilate the corn"
After the concert Mrs. Amateur-"That last number
was delicious. What beautiful air!" Mrs. Iinsel-
Beautiful air For part thought 1t was extremely
oppressive. II fearfully warm. and there didne
seem to any ventilation at a."-tBoston Transcript
A Nebraska editor began his New-Years editorial
as follows:
with pen OF gold dipped in the OIL Of gadness
That fellow very evidently not running a news
paper New Mexico. Pencils dozen for ten cents are
good enough out here.-tNew Mexican Review
The Presidential election being concluded Western ed
looking around for the wherewithal to I'LL
their columns and the revival of stories Of The
Meanest Man on Record" Many and wonderful have
been tales related of this ubiquitous individual but
probably one best from the other side OF
the "herrng-pond": young swede recently sent In
bill for fifty cents to the administration OF the aims
house where his mother had for some time lived and
eventually died The demand for the money was bssed
the Of time occasLoned by going to his mothers
funeral
want TO be an author with an A,
Or a journalistic writer with Al;
Ia express my own opinion
And have 1t set in minion,
Nor care a for kckers with K
Realization
I'm an editor at last with
Soon may be tramp with I.
My ideas rather scattered
For my hopes rudey shattered,
And I'm hungry as Gehenna with q.
/ Boston Post
IfMr Edmunds and Mr.. Bayard should happen to bs
opposing candidates for the Presidency In 1888 where
would the Irish vote go
Consantinople dispatch states that the Sultan 10
great amateur musician When nIisfortunes crush
man. there always secret reasons for them back OF
those he chooses TO make public
The telephone bell in doctors Office in Brooklyn rang
afternoon the call answered by the Doctors
wife After the usual "hellos" from both parties the
No" said he would call and see him. "who are you
aueried the lady. "who am n la, ha ha Why can't
you smell my breath p the response.
An American whilst visit to the old country, was
talking to group OF cockneys about railway travelling
1d remarked that fthe fast trainsn this country
ran long stretches the rate Of milo minute "Oh!
that's nothing the rate they travel this side inter-
rIpted one Of the LOndsner know the conductor OK
Of fast express trains who aimed a blow with
club at a standing at little waysde station through
which the train passed. and knocked down aud Killed
man standing at station miles further That's
what call speed"
Three fishermen went gayy out into the North
Out into the North the sun was high,
And they chuckled with giee as they sailed fortns
Resolved To capture the trout-or die
For will fish and men Will ie,
About the trout they caught on the ny -
Their 81 nday- school lessons scorrIing.
Three fishers lay lnder the trees at noon.
And blamed " the whole OF the unny race;
For never a nibble had touched fly spoon
And each sighed n he wet the hole In his lace \
For will fish and men Will lie,
Aud the way they caught trout when nobody's high !
Is something TO tell-in the inoraing.
Three fishermen came into town at night,
And their specked beauties y were fair to Sec
They talked of their II" sports with keen delight
The envy OF all the fraternity
But men will fish and men will lie,
ANA what they can't catch they're sure to buy,
And repent in the morning.
Liverpool England Courier.
80 your son gone abroad Aren't you afraid hs
will fall a victim the cbolerap mo, tndeei ne 10
member of a baseball club, and his friends inform
LusA~ Ah fno + "a fDG