The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1885-11-06
MARC Antony and his little speech,

aud actresses BY doing the grand
standing around act, and others arc
ready to follow them. A fellow often
makes . hit without opening his
mouth. Look at the Lone Fisherman
In 'Evangeline.' Not q word from
him. Why, there 10 Harry Dixey him.
self used 70 play the hind legs Of the
heifer In .Evangelins.' and ke didn't
make much Of Q par Of propsllsrs
either. ! needn't say anything about
the other sex. Numbers Of them have
rushed into popular favor on shape.
ly ankle. or caught the public fancy
with plump arm. But say, I must
be going. ltyou want to hear what
stage figure has to say abont the bust
ness I'll call one. You can't fire of .
gun in Union square without hitting
one Of thcm fellows. Hello, there!
say!"
A struggling genius in an alpaca
coat, who seemed to keep his hair dono
up in tinfoil all night, SO as to cluster
about two backward but expansive
ears, heard the call, and seemed to
think there was an engagement ring
about it. For he slipped up at once,
quite gaily, but assumed crushed and
dismal air when he heard what was
expected of him.
''You figure in spectacles, don't
yOu?" asked the reporter, as the new
conner occurred to Ills memory in con.
ncct"n with military pageant and a
procession Of ancient stage men-at
arms.
~ iggers in anything I'm paid for
liggcrin' in,' said the other. Come up
stairs if you wants to talk"
Tho reporter followed him to the
agency anteroom.
YES" he resumed, II figgers In
spectacles with q spear as hasn't got
no point onto it. and plato armor made
out O. rum lixin's."
There was I'M air of misanthropy
and cynicism about the man that was
quite melancholy.
''Do you like ftp"
Motif 1 knows myself. Some codg-
crs. 'spOse, takes some stock in the
females with no clothes to speak of ON
'em and in the dresses, and all that.
don't. I'm locking for the price.
And it don't pay. Fifty cents q night,
and sometimes a dollar, with an en-.
gagement now and then at ten week
if there's some foolery to be done,
doesn't pay q chap like me. It's
bad business toll YOU"
''But the surroundings arc pleasant
should think"
'Oh, them be blowod. What's the
fun o carrying wooden spear around
and holding IL string o. paper flowers
over a dancing gals head, or putin
OH one o. them old Roman night shirts
and hollerin' yourself hoarse over
some bad actors spoutin'. 1t amt
no good tell you. And then to think
of hanging around timber throne
and drinking out o gilded goblets with
not blessed drop in 'em, and dinin'
ever 80 jolly on property grub, with
the orchestra going like mad. and the
gals with their cast iron smiles ho0tin'
1t around you, and the people thinkin'
what high old time you're havin',
and you all the while a-dyia' for a
glass o. beer. There amt no fun in
it,
you've appeared in many partsa"
Eyes, I've been sojers and sailors
and niggcrs and Injuns and peasants
and Gypses and joints"
"And whatp''
"And joints. Joints in the pauto.
mines, with q big paste5oard head
and body to matck-them what eats
little kids in the story book"
"Oll, giants"
II said joints"
"What did you have to doe''
"All kinds O foolin'. II you want
me to, I'll perform"
Good. DO $50.
The figure stood half upright, with
| his 1.nv u AZ s-L
strike.
chats waryear." said lie.
He marched across the room like
mute ut u funeral.
"Roman sojer koin' to battle" he
explained
He grabbed his hip and thigh pock-
cts coincidentaliy. and as he jerked
them up, gave bob Of the head.
''.Able seaman." he remarked.
He wad,llcd like q duck and swung
his arms like windmill.
''IiOnest yeomanry."
He waved his hands in the dir and
bawled, Hey, yeh, yeh!"
excited populace." d., ..
He repeated the gesture and
shouted, "Down with i'm! Down with
'im!'
"Muliny or war"
He hoped about, brandishcd one
fist. beat tho other on his mouth and
yelled -.
..Injun on the warpathr"
He sank on the ground and
stretched out his limbs.
"a stiff for tab!eau." he said.
When he got up he busted his jacket
and then, turning about, he NUT
tcrcd:-
"Them's tho kind O. games 1 got
to tackle. There amt no fun IN it, I
tell you. There amt no fun in it.
Then, Us he began nursing his indie-
nation for new explosion, he walked
the room silently before he So d.
"'Sidcs all that, I've had to be birds
and brute beasts, and Lord knows
what. 1t makes u man mad to be in
such company, and to be talked to as
that kind. Once l was roc, which
is big bird IN 'Sinbad the Sailor
and had to be let down from the flies
to carry Sinbad away. The first roc
they had got drunk and dropped SIN
bad on his head, SO that be cursed aw-
full and bounced the roc. On that
account l was careful like and grab.
bed Sinbad under the arms. He was
a crank, Sinbad was, and he says.
that's HI Of. q way for a roc to
catch Il man" With that SAYS, If
you don't like this roc, bowed but
you've got to fly away Yourself and
dropped him plump down on the
stage, ard got even for his sassin' me
that way. A Teller has to stand good
deal when no makes a menager;e of
himself" a
..Do not stage figures generally
have some special physical advantage
of face or formp''
Yes. That gives 'cm bigger pull"
ages?''
"Hair and teeth" said no.
Tho reporter looked at tho black
clusters by the ears and the row of
white mOlars.
''Thcy are good" he commented.
'You must take caro- of them"