davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

y lady writes; "Your Hep P5roY Plts-
Ter does the work every tina; do rot
have that awful pain in the side now. 3"
Your experience will he the same Sold
everywhere 2jc.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

IT was, no doubt, a bachelor com o>itnr
who, in setting NJ the toast, "wnman:
without her man would lie savage, ;"
made thread, Woman, without her man,
would be a savage
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09
H U M 0 R 0 U S,

A Muldoon was running for polit cal
office. lie kept corner liquor store Of
course. About two o'clock in the morning
after election day vast crowd of his friends
and supporters came rushing in and carried
with one voice: 'Set up the rum, Mike,
you're elected
"Bcjabbcrs - exclaimed Mike, sis it
so?"
Yes they chimed in, Eyer ave mcjor-
ity ov tin thousand an moor"
Mike set up glasses and rum for the e. tire
crowd and they all drank enthusiastically
and of bad liquor.
''An' I'm elicted?" repeated Mike in great
gee.
''Su'c ye are, - carried the crowd,
'Au will yez plaze tell me byes," said
Nike, sis it to Alliance or Washington l
go?"
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09
How lie Lost Ills crop.

a few days ag farmer from the country
was in sumter Ga, clothing store aud
Raifold lad tried in vain to sell him Il sut
of clothes; failing in this, he then tired tu
sell him Il straw hat "cheap as picking it up
in the road. The counuymau looked at
the hat, remarking: "Well, that is cheap
enough, but it would be dear to me if You
would gin lit to me- Flows thar?' said
Raiford. ''Yo see, had a straw hat once
and when | was at work it would lust inmr
OIL every t mo the wind bowed and lad Ia
run myself nearely to death to kctch IT. s.,
you see run every bit of tilae away aud
lost my crop lunnm artcr my hat |
jlst took t to tho house in the fan aud
c'awled under my my b,d aud put iva HAT
mons ON the dingcd old thing and told II To-
stay thar, and it's thar yit'
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

why don't You go out into the country 2
said the tramp, gaz ng with scorn at hi.
healtless nlc'rgator-"@hy, amt it harvest
time Them farmers are just mean and
smal-aouled ,n,ug t AK man to turn tn
aud work Ion his victuals. Do you suppose
want to have tie back of my neck all
blisieled up and my hands stuck full of
thiHtes, and like as not, get mashed up in
some of their tlrcshing mackiues And be-
Sid's conll never clt rr;cd roIk and hot
biscuit all the time Il amt healthy"
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09
Wilmington
Clothing
House,
Fine Tailoring.
mo. 8O5::-
MARKET
ST.
Jn". w. Dicfendorf, Manager.

WlLMlNG1oN, Del. April l9, IS.
Having removed our place Of
business to the above number,
we solicit a continuance OF your
patronage feeling assured we can
give you satisfactory work. We
have a stock Of Suitings and
Trowserings to select from equal
if not superior to any in this mar
ket and our intention is to make
this branch a special feature of
our business. Thanking you for
your orders in the past we hope
to merit a continuance of the
same.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09
ioc., 25c., SOC. and Si.oo.
HOME TESTIMONIALS:

had
B. r.
OF
e.
e Brazilian Balm will do iIhHy CprddI
h Dr. NJ said the lie ErazHinIn cured
r. W d r. Rl children in days with scarlet fever; the fourth child
aelyB"rtoa B. h.pHtE N!tpd. Di
Sold by Druggists and Dealers on receipt of price, by
b. f. JACKSON & Co, nmingt Del
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09
j. 0. Mccormick
5. +. COR. 7TH & JEFER-
son STREETS.

Dealer in fine groceriesand pro
visions; choice cohees a specially,
Rios, 10, 20 and Is cents, l.agua-
yra, Santan, Old Gov. Java, 80
cents, guaranteed to be fine ar
ticle; choice teas. Fres1 and salt
meats, canned goods of all kinds;
Lea & Co. and western flours.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

Gentlemen, can not lie, about this
horse. He is blind in one eye" said the
auctoneer. The horse was soon knocked
down 20 spectator who had been greatly
struck by the auctionoer's honesty. After
paying for the horse, lie said "You were
honest enough to tell me that this animal
was blind in one eye; is there any other
defect y Yes, sir, there is He is also
blind in the other eye" was the prompt
reply.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

Il tell you what it is, Mrs. Jnks," said
that ladys husband, wrathfully, Il don't
want you or any other man 10 say I'm
crooked in my dealing"
"Who said you were ,he answered
sulkily.
lyon did, madam, when you intmated
that had money and lied to keep you from
uSrrTg t. want TO tel you, mada6I>. Il
hold my head up anywhere"
That's nothing" she snapped out.
Saint it think it's more than great
many husbands can say"
mo, it int, eitler, if their heads are as
empty and light as yours is"
Jinks adjourned the meeting
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

Where's the bar, )" asked dirty-lookiug
stranger of a waiter at a hotel, the other
day
"What kind of a bar - asked til latter.
"Why, liquor bar, OF couse; what do
you suppose mean p
"WclI, " drawl2d the boy, 81 didn't know
but that you might mean a bar of soap.
We car, without hesitation, say that Dir.
Bulls Cough Syrup has given the best
satisfaction, We lave sold an immense
amount Of it during the past winter.
WALLACE, HILTON y co..
Druggists, lock Haven, Pa.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09
HARD TIMES
OFFER.

These are hard times es-eycrybody knows il
To sell goods extraordinary Inducements IN
any line of trade must be made.
We offer just now $25 Beech Loading
Doubc-bareled Gun for $3. This Gun is
the Celebrated Franklin" known the wor d
over for its superb materials and workman
ship, its fine finish aud durable and lasting
qualities,
1t weighs u to II pounds, has strong
Action, Choke Bore, 20 to - inch Steel
Barrels Blued. 10 or 12 Gauge Elegant
Carved Walnut Stock-ia fact Il pelft ct
Chef d'ocuvrc-a gun which will give you
perfect satisfaction and last as long as you
have occasion for gun. We also offer a
$4,000 Waltham Watch in Elegant Imperial
Good Hunting Case, for only $1,000. This
watch is full wrlcd and is better watch
than the old English Patent Lever which it
has cntiely supplauted. Il will keep pcr-
Iect time as luns as you live, aud can otcn
he III d'd ior four ol five times its cost.
If you are dissa tisiied with Watch OF Gun
send it right back and have your money re-
funded.
Order now, Address At once or call upon
Franklin Manufacturing Co.,
So FULTON ST., New York
Largest Dealers in Guns and Watches in
the United States. Send for unsol cited
testimonials.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

| would recommend Ely's Cream
Balm to any one having Catarih or Catarrhal
Asthma. have suffered for five years so |
could not lie down for weeks at time.
Since have been using the Balm can lie
down and rest thank God that you ever
invented such Il medicine. FRANK p. BUR-
KEIGH, Pennington, N. H.
My Son, aged nne years. was afflicted
with Catarrh; the use of lly's Cream Balm
effected IA complete cure.-W. L. HAMMAN,
Druggist, Easton, Pa. 80 cts. package.
See adv't.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

lady who Lad boasted highly at a dinner
party of her little dazzling, addressed him
thus
Charley, my dear, won't you have some
beanso'
mol" was the ill-manncrcd reply Of the
pctulant chcrub.
No. exclaimed tue a,tunished mother
mo what -
mo beans.
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

II have thee oil the hip" cried rheumat-
ism seizing his victim and tossing him on
suffering bed, mot so, - lie cried, mot so!
Wait, my ancient foe, just five minutes,
until the boy brings bottle of Salvation
Oil, then we'll see who wins the day.'
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

What's dc occasion OF dat big smoke
over dah - inquired one eolored man of
another at the corner, yesterday. Fire.
sab, was the answer Aud what's de
occasion Of de fire p "COmbusthum." >"
And whats cpmbusthum ?" "My friend,
replied the ptlcr crossings his legs, "dars
heaps Of things in the wuld dat no Niger
ever moved OF ever will know, au Wen
change de silliect to gooSebcrries"
The Wilmingtonian., 1885-05-09

MIR. L. r. HoyC, mechanical engineer al
the New Orleans Exposition, was severely
injured by IA huge derrick pole falling OIL
his foot. lie was conveyed to his residence
and after only three applications of St
Jacobs oil,all swelling and,pain disappeared
and he resumed his duties.
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
OPTICAL ILLUSIONS.
Strange Phenomena OF the Death Bed.

Strange Phenomena Of the Death-Bed.
From the Philadelphia North American.
MANY people," writes a lady CORE
spondent from Newark, "are deceived
by optical illusions. On arecent morn
ing I looked into my brothers room,
and saw him standing at his dressing
case. Then remembered that I heard
him 90 down stairs, and I said to my
self, this is an optical Illusion Know
ing that it was such, looked at the fig
ure until it slowly faded away. Let
me add that I am in good bodily health,
cheerful and, believe, sound in mind.
A friend who died lately said in her last
hours, when apparently she was ration
al, that she saw her dead parents and
brother in her room. She exclaimed,
addressing the friends who stood at her
bedside, There they are, right there.
Can't you see them? I repeat that, as
far as any one can Judge, she was
| thoroughly conscious. But we will pass
over her case, for it is not exceptional,
| neither can we affirm positively that she
had her senses.
/ but here, think, is an unusual
form of optical illusion. if it was. an H.
fusion at all. A few days ago we'll
known business man of New York pass
ed away His widow is clear mind
ed and educated lady without any NOR
bid or superstitious faint in her ma
ture, or any belief in spiritualism.
While bending over her husband, short
ly before his death she observed that
the EXPIRE ssion OF his face was changing,
and the next moment saw there, in
stead, the face of her brother. The
two men entirely unlike in appearance,
one being light and having blonde
beard, and the other very dark. Short
ly afterward the lady saw on her hus-
bands face the expression Of another
! deceased friend, and a little later that
of a third. Her morbid and over
wrought fancy deceived her, some one
says Could two persons be deceived at
the same time and in the same way? 1
asked this because three years ago this
lady and her sister watched beside the
dying child OF the latter. The little
girls face suddenly changed. One of
the ladies saw that the other observed
this, and said:
Emily, who was it,"
"Adelaide," was the answer.
eyes, Adelaide"
"The two ladies have told me that
they saw Enthusiastically the face Of their
dead cousin, a woman, shining out
through the face of the dying child. I
offer no explanation OF these phenome-
ma, and present them only because to
me they seem very interesting"
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
DESTROYING Horns.

The horns Of an animal can be de-
stroyed in embryo with very little pain
in the following manner: The small
"nubs" from which the horns will grow,
which appear on the Calls head, are
cut off with a knife so that the embryo
horns can be cut away. This is done
with great ease and quite rapidly by
the use of 8 sharp knife. Tie wound
is then scared with white-hot iron,
which is not painful, as the great heat
deadens the sensation, and it soon heals.
The horn is destroyed and it's growth
is prevented. Considering the great
danger Of injury from the horns of cat
tie. this operation is a necessary one
and as it is less painful than that OF
docking lambs tails and far less pain
full than castration, any peoson who
object TO it may be thought more nice
than wise.
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
Marriage and Genius.

Inc author or John Halifax has
positive opinions on marriage as con-
nected with genius. 1.-TWO people, !"
she says, "man and wife, of whom one
was supposed to be, and both really
were, wonderfully gifted, succeed in.
making one onother thoroughly miser-
able. Why? Because the woman mar
ried out of wounded femenine pride or
(she owned for ambition 8 self alb
sorbed, egotistical, bad-tempered man,
who had ruined his constitution by his
persistent breaking of every law Of
health. Disappointed, neglected, she
does her wifely duty in literal sense,
but she seasons it with incessant
complaints and the cruel use OF that
weapon which is O. gentlewoman's
instructive defence against q boor-
sarcasm. He, too, lives a life unim-
peachable externally, but within full OF
rancor, malice and a se1fshness which
approaches absolute cruelty; his peas
ant nature perpetually binding him to
the sufferings of his wife, more gently
born and gently bred; while her NOR
bid sensitiveness exaggerates trivial vex-
atoms into great misfortunes, and mere
follies into actual crimes. All this
wretchedness sprung, not from the
mans genius, but his other bad quail
ties, which, had he been brainless
ass, would have made his wife's life and
his own just as miserable. Yet society
means out the moral, "Never marry a
genius!" or tho worse one, IF YOU do
marry genius you must condone all
his short comings, lay Yourself down as
"a mat for him to rub his shoes On, give
him every thing, and expect from him
nothing, not even the commonest rules
of domestic courtesy and social morali-
nv ~
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
- -
HE NEVER xHoWED.

From the Boston Evening Gazette.
Old Billy B. was pious man, r...'3 -
And heaven was his goal; T..
For, being very saving man, .'E&-.
Ed. Of co urse, he'd saved bis soul. g..
But, even in this, he used to say, !.
"One can't too careful be = =
And he sang with fervor unassunled,
'Im glad salyation's free" -. "a ....s :.
But the means Of grace, he had to own.
Required good, hard earned gold;
And he took ten pews, as we'll became
The richest Of the fold. -,.
''Hes noble man." the preacher cried
''Our Christian Brother B..
And Billy smiled as he sublet nine,
And got hls own pew free.
In class meeting next, old Billy told
How heaven had gracious been,
Yea, even back in the dark days when
He was man of sin.
III was building barn on my river farm.
"All had then" he said;
'Td run out o boards, and was feedin' hands
Con nothin' but corn bread
4sIte.l We, brethren, that + felt blue,
i, Short O boards and cash,
And thought I'd die when the banks then bust,
And Hooded all my mash.
But the Lord was nlerciful to me
And sent right through the rift
The tide had made in the river banks
A lumber raft adrift.
PLENTY O boards was there for the barn,
And on top was a cheese,
And bari q pork as sound and sweet
AS any one ever sees.
Then had bread and meat for the men,
Aud they worked with will,
While thanked God who'd been good to me,
And I'm doin' it still
A shrill-yoiced sister cried "Bless the Lord!"
The whole class cried Amen!
But keen eyed man looked at Billy B.
In thoughtful way, and then
Asked: brother B., did YOU ever hear
Who lost that raft and load?"
And Billy wiped his eyes and said,
''Brethelin' I ney or knowed!"
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
Maria Ward and John Randolph.

One of the saddest and most roman
tic love affairs in the social annals OF
Virginia was that OF Maria Ward and
John Randolph Of Roanoke. Begin
ming in his early boyhood, it became
the one enthralling passion of his
manhood, filling his whole being, until,
as he himself said, she loved her bet
ter than his own soul or Him that ere
ated it's There is picture of John
Randolph in the rooms of the Virginia
Historical Society, taken at the time
when he was the accepted lover of
Maria Ward. It represented singu-
larly handsome youth of TWENTY-FIVE,
his eyes dark. and full of intellect. his
mouth beautifully formed, and over
his proud and lofty forehead fell
profusiou of dark hair. The breaking
off OF the affair is wrapped in mystery;
all we know is that one summer morn
ing he rode up to the house, and after
a. long interview in the parlor, the lady
left the room in tears, while he rushed
from the house, mounted his horse,
and rode furiously away. He never
saw her again; but one day. he ap-
preached a house where she was stay
ing while she was singing in the par.
lor. Facinatef by the sound of her
voice he fingered on the porch, and
sent in from time to time request for
her to sing one after another the ten
der little ballads which were associa-
ted with their loves. Maria Ward
sang, unconscious of her lovers D, es.
ence, while he rushed frantically up
and down the porch in an agony OF
grief, waving his arms, and crying in
the anguish OF his heart: macbeth
hath murdered sleep; Macbeth shall
sleep no moren'
Maria Ward married Peyton Ran
dolph, son of Edmund Randolph, who
was Governor of Virginia, the first
Accomplishment Of the United States.
and Secretary of State under Washing
ton. This lady was distinguished for
the exquisite grace and facination of
her manners and her bright wit. Her
portrait, copy of which has been Sc
cured for this article through the
courtesy of her granddaughter, Mrs.
J. L. Williams, OF Richmond, repre-
sents a lovely girl OF sixteen, with
wondrous blue eyes, exquisitely deli
cate complexion, Il profusion Of sunny
brown curls, and in the quaint costume
of the last century.
Maria Ward died in 1926, aged forty
two years. All contemporary accounts
unite in describing her as possessing
a singular fascination of manners, q
charming sweetness and amiability of
disposition, an enchanting gayety and
esprit, and q peculiar, irresistible, per-
sonal loneliness. At the time of her
death she was still as fresh as the
summer rose, as captivating in mind
and manners as when she enthralled
the passionate heart OF John Randolph
of Roanoke. E. l.. Didaer, IN Hur-
pe7''s Magasi,ae for April.
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
The Prince OF Wales as Speech-maker.

There are very few men in England
who can make as good a speech as the
Prince of Wales. His voice is singu-
larly far-reaching, clear, pleasant, and
his delivery is simple and dignitied.
But it must not be supposed that the
ease and huency which now character
ize his public discourses were attained
witout trouble, or that the Prince is
one of the :'mob of gentlemen who
speak at ease.'' and have very little
to say worth listening to-. At first,
when he had to address an audience
and it fell to his lot TO begin speech
making whilst he was vel Y young in
deed he spoke with some hesitation,
and he gave his audience the idea Of
who would be very glad when he could
sit down; but by persistent practice,
stimulated by the certainty that he
must look forward to constant calls
upon him, and animated by high
sense of duty, the Prince overcame the
difficulties which beset most young
orators, aggravated in his case by the
consciousness that every word he ut
tered would be eagerly weighed and
recorded. He has acquired COM
mand of language and q felicity of ex
preston which commend his matter
to the most critical, whilst it is at the
same time judicious in substance and
much to the point. No one can make
better case for charitable institu-
ton than the PRINCE. and his appeals
to the pockets of his hearers when he
is presiding alta dinner to promote
the work of some benetcent associa.
ton, or to further some useful and
meritorious enterprise. are so success
full that it is considered the fortune of
an evening, from financial point of
view, is secured when the Prince of
Wales has consented to take the chair.
On occasions of national importance
and interest, such as the opening of
public institutions, the Princes
speeches. carefully prepared and ex-
cellently pronounced, are models of
what such work should be, setting
forth the objects in view, the history
of the movement, and the claims it
has to support or approval, in we'll
chosen and effective words. The
Prince has had practice enough GER
tainly, for since his marriage he has
been associated with every movement
in the kingdom, and has been called
upon to open exhibitions, bridges and
buildings, parks and museums, ''in-
augurate'' statues, lay foundation
stones, preside at commissions and
banquets year after year, and has
answered to the call with, untlagging
cheerfulness, aud effect William
Howard Russell, IN Eospsr's Maqazine
for ApyiI e.. r.E .....~..%
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
Years Teach More Than Books.

Among other valuable lessons impaired by
this teacher is the fact that for & very long
time DR.. Pierce's "Golden Medical Discovery"
has been the prince Of liver correctives and
blood purifiers, being the household physician
Of the poor man, and the able consulting
physician to the rich patient, and praised by
all for it's magnificent service and efficacy in
all diseases of chronic nature, as nalalial
poisoning, a,lment of the respiratory and d.
gestive systems, liver disease and in all cases
where the use of an Alternative remedy is in
dicated
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
"Mothers Should Note This"

Under this caption an old physician writes to
a Cincinnati Medical Journal that III view Of
the fact that people living at a distance from
cities are frequently obliged to resort to cough
mixtures already put up for use, they should
provide themselves with only such remedies as
narcotics; thus avoiding not only danger. but
even fatal results. He recommends the re-
Gently discovered Red Star Cough Cure which
analyses and tests by yarions Boards Of Health
proved to be purely vegetable as we'll as prompt,
effective and entirely harmless
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05

ioned wedding when the dresses are
made
And Saba--quiet Saba-is to stay
with Uncle John, to read the paper to
him and cheer up the long, lonely even
ings. 5, .zs .s,s ..5s :.
"For I couldn't get along without
the girl, nohow!" says Uncle John, ioy.
tally. Helen Forrest Graves.
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05

1t is not understood why druggists keep in
stock so many kinds of medicines for coughs,
colds and CONSUMPTION when it is only neces-
sary to keep Aliens Lung Balsam, that old, re-
liable remedy, which is pure vegetable prep
aration. aud perfectly harmless, as it contains
no opium in any FORM Sold everywhere
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05

For DYSPEPSIA, Indigestion, Depression OF Spir-
its and General Debility in their various forms,
also as preventive against Fever and Ag1e, and
other intermittent Fevers, the "FEKRo-PHosPHo
RATED ELIXIR OF CALrsAYA" made by Caswell
Hazard d Co., New York, and sold by all Drug
gists is the best tonic, and for patients recover
ing from Fever or other sickness, it has noequal
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05
Pile Tunaors

however large, speedily and painlessly cured
without knife, caustic, powder or ointment:
Consultation free Write for pamphlet and
references, enclosing two letter stamps for re-
ply. Worlds Dlspensary Medical Association,
6G3 Main Street, Buffalo, N. Y.
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05

Hostetfer's Stor,1-
ach Bitters conQuers
and prevents Inalar-
ial feverz dyspepsia,
chronic, constipation,
q tendency to kidney
and bladder ailments
and rheannatisn and
is of the greatest value
in cases Of bodily
trouble arising from
weakness. Old peo-
pie are greatly aided
by ii, and it is highly
serviceab BILE to conval-
eScents and ladies in
delicate health. It is
moreover. IA useful
ii b dici,n e to take
with o;leo niong jour
and counteracts
the effects OF mental
nrhnf,atirIs9 Far nalA{
Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1885-06-05

We know DR.. Graves Health Reg ulato
will cure Heart Disease. Thirty years use and
many persons of prominence testlfying prove
it.--Readvilie Press. $1.00 per bottle at drug
gists Free pamphlet Of F. E. Ingalls,, Cam
bridge. Mass