West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1885-10-09

where q change OF heart n n palm
leaf fan ia all they need.
Fewer people are robbing the editor
nowadays, too. | notice with much
pleasure. Only a short time ago /
noticed that a burglar succeeded i'm
breaking into the residence of a Dakota
journalist, and after a long, hard strug-
gle. the editor succeeded in robb.ng
him.
After the primary course. mapped out
already. an intermediate curse of ten
years should be given TO learning the
typographical art so that when visitors
come in and ask the editor all about
the oilicc he a tell them of the mys-
terieS Ot making a paper, and how de
Hnquent subscribers have frequently
been killed by n well-directeI blow
with a printers towel.
Five years should be devoted to "A
study of the art of proof-rcading. In
that time the young Journalist can per-
tcyt himself TO such a degree that it
VIII take another five years for the
printer to understand his corrections
and marginal notes.
Fifteen years should then be devoted
to the study Of American politics. es-
pocially. Civil-Service reform. looking at
1t from II non partisan standpoint. II
t''H0AfA'f lut lh'N HNt years NlOllu nc
spent abroad. London is the place 10
80 if YOU wish to get a Gear. concise
view Of American politics, and Chicago
or Milwaukee would be a good place
Tor the young English journalist to 20
aud study the political outlook OF
England.
The student should then take a medi-
cal and surgical course, so that he may
be able TO attend to Commissions, tract
ureS and so fourth which may occur to
himself or to the party who may come
to his Office for II %retraction and by mis-
take get his spinal column double-lead-
ed.
Ter years should then be given to the
study of law. No thorough, metropol-
itan editor wants TO enter upon the
duties of his profession without know
ing the difference between n writ of
mdRdanuS and other styles of profan-
ity. He should thoroughly understand
the entire system of American iuris-
prudence so that in case a ~certiOrdri
should break out in his ~neighborhood
he would know just what TO do for il.
The student will, by this time, begin
TO see what is required of him, and en-
ter with great zeal upon the further
study of his profession.
nv NIfth a. III
course of ten years and fit himself thor
oughly to speak intelligently of the va
rious creeds and religionAof the world.
Ignorance on the part of an editor is
almost a crime, and when he closes a
powerful editorial with the familiar
quotation: "It is the early bird that
catches the worm and attributes it to
st. Paul instead of Deuteronomy, il
makes us blush for the profession.
The last ten years may be profitably
devoted to the acquisition of a prac-
teal knowledge of cutting cOrdwood,
baking beans, making shirts, lecturing,
turning double hand-springs, being
shot out of a catapult at a circus, learn
ing how to make a good adhesive
paste that will not sou in hot weather,
grinding scizZors, p~unctuating. capital
lzatlon. condemnation, syntaz, plain
sewing, music and dancing, s%culping,
etiquette, prosody, how to win the aflec-
tons OF the opposite scX and evade a
malignant case of breach of promise,
the ten commandments, every man his
own tooter on the flute, croquet, rules
OF the prize ring, rhetoric, parlor
mage, calisthenics, ~penmanship, how
to run a jack from the bottom of the
pack without getting shot, civil en-
glneertng, decorative art, calsomining.
bicycling, baseball, hydraulics, botany.
poker, international law. high-lOw
Jack. drawing and painting, faro,
vocal music, driving, breaking team,
fitteen-ball pool, how to remove grease
spots from last years pantaloons.
Craftsmanship, coupling freight carr,
riding on n rail, riding on a pass, feed
ing threshing machines, how to wean a
calf from the parent stem, teaching
school, bull-whacking, plastering,
Waiting, vaccination, autopsy. how to
win the affect Ons of Your wife's
mother, every man his own washer
woman, or how TO wash undcrclothcs
so that they VIII not shrink, etc, etc.
But time forbids anything ike a
thorough list of what a Young man
should study in order TO fully under
stand all that ne may be called upon to
express an opinion about in his actual
experience as a journalist. There are
q thousand little matters which every
editor should know. such. for instance.
as the construction Of roller compost
ton. Many newspaper men can write
q good editorial on Asiatic cholera. but
their roller composition is not fit to eat.
With the course of study thatI have
mappe out, the Young STUDENT would
emcrgt from the college OF journalism
az the az of ninety-fvc or uncty-six.
ready TO take OFT hi, Goa and write an
article Oh almost any subject. He
would ba "a little giddy az first. and the
Office boy would have to see that he
went to be at a proper time each night.
but aside from that, he would be q good
man to i"ci a waste paper basket
Actual experience Is the best teacher
Do ibis peculiarly trying profession. /
hope s1me day 60 attend a press con-
v|ention whore the order Of exercises
Will consist of liye.miuuts cNpcri-
enoes from each one present IT would
bee worth listening tJ.
My w experience was q little pccu-
liar. IL was my intention ar first TO
practice law, when I went TO the Rocky
Mountains, although I had been warned
DY the authorities not TO do SO. ~tjII. /
did practice in % slrreptitiou kind o.
% way. and might have been pract.c.ng
yet if my client hadn't died When Won
have become attached 60 2 client and
rc.pe Q and ike him, aud then when
without warming. like "a bolt oil electric
ity from q clear sky, he suddenly dies
and takes the bread right out Of our
mOIta DO 3. rough.
Then i tried the pr9cfiro of r,,s,.r