Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-08-06

The lCNt anu tl1GtilOu INIT eNlStS De-
tween brothers frequently begins to
exist when they are mere children.
.Will Tommy always be younger than
amp asked little Texas boy of his
~N mother. Yes, sonny That's bull
~. I'll always be able TO lick him and
take his things away from him as long
as he lives.
Chicago girls don't have to let them-
selves down with ropes or shin down
ladders when they want to clope. The
old man opens the front door for EN-,
carries the bundle out ON the steps,
and locks the door with the remark:
..Whcn YOU get tired OF your cowboy
come nome aud take the cooks place
at 80 per week.
Il woudn't worry about the cholera,
dear, " said awitc TO her hus oand; lit
isn't Mt all likely that it will reach this
country. Il don know about that, "
he replied, neryously; at might break
out ut any moment. and we might have
frightful time. IL think / had bet
ter pay the back pew rent. anyway 81
Indianapolis journal.
Here is a clever little article that
ton of your readers, he said as he
tiptoed into the editorial-room. Il am
afraid, replied the editor as he looked
it over, ''that it will not meet with the
appreciation of my readers. MOP
Why not?" Because it will never
have Il chance. IN y, Times.
"Now, johnnie, said fond West
End mother to her little boy who had
helped himselfto good deal more cake
than he could well make way with.
another time you'll mind me. | told
you YOU couldn't eat all that cake :"
'Well, said Johnnie. still struggling
with a big slice Il could if my vittelth
ID only thettlc. - Boston record.
The coachman and the chambermaid
were to be married in September. One
day they were having a small-sized
lovers quarrel in the back yard and
he kicked u ham nearly off the dog,
standing near them. Don't kick that
dog she exclaimed angrily. Don't
worry about the dog" he replied,
lust wait till get you. The match
is of. -Uegchant IrdCciey.
Mrs. blinks There it is again. To-
bacco, always tobacco. What will you
do when you ret to Heaven, where
there are nc spit'oons? Mr., Minks--
Perhaps there will DC some there. Mrs.
Mnks- Indeed there won't The ideal
What will you do then, Mr.. Minks?
Just answer that Mr.. Dlinks-I really
don't know, my dear, unless we can
get seats near the edge. IHiiadciphia
CAL.
"What did You pay for these cigars,
my son. They are not at all bad. "
"Threo for Il half-dolIar, governor
That is wickedly extra ragant. Why,
! never think Of paying more than 10
cents for a cigar myself. " well, |
should think 10 cents was enough. If
had rs many children to watch over
and provided for as you have, I'll be
hanged if d smoke at all. - Toronto
World.
Pickens County, Georgia, has a post
office named Talking Rock. The
origin of the name is thus stated
Some one discovered in the vicinity q
large stone upon which had been paint
ed the words, Turn me over 1t re-
quired considerable strength to accom-
plish this, and when it was done the
command, Nov turn me back and let
me fool some one else, " was painted
on the under side of the stone.
Yes" said Mrs Catchem, 'those
are my daughters over there on the
sofa; they have half a million between
them 1t was not until they were
married to those daughters that the
two young men who overheard the re-
mark found out that Mrs. Catchem re-
ferred to the rich old codger who sat
on the sofa between the girls. Mrs
Catchem couldn't tell a tib, but she
knew how to speak the truth advan-
tageously.
The tremendous downpour of water
at Niagara is wearing away the rocky
face Of the falls at the rate of half an
inch in every five years. At this speed
1t will be 3, 1863, S85 years before the
falls recede as far as Buffalo, and they
have been 1867, 900 years in reaching
their present position. The only way
in which the human mind can form
any conception of such slow rate of
motion is by thinking intently and per-
sistently of a Boston horse car Som
crUHlG Journal.
The revision of the Old Testament
has revived the hopes of some people
who expect to have things smoothed
for them ali through this life. 1t was
this interesting fact that induced Shut
lie to attend church yesterday. "How
did you like the scrmon?" inquired a
friend as he passed out of the yestibule.
Never was so disguised in my life.
Why, the man took Thou shalt not
stea' for his text. " That's good
text F." "It's the same old text. 1
thought the new version would read,
Thou shalt not compromise for TWEEN
ty-iiye cents on the dollar. "-HarJord
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