The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1885-09-04
A wIFE-S CONFESSIONS.
The Way She Looks al MatrimOny

me way Sue IIooAs at atftutOnys
An indiscreet bachelor recently sent
letter to the PaH Mall Gazette on the sub
ject Of marriage. That he committed
blunder by SO doing will be seen by a pc
rusal of the following article, which wa,
printed in the above-named paper and en-
titled ''The Confessions of Wife"
A woman who has endured some twenty
years of matrimony possesses perhaps
some qualifications to supplement. from a
feminine standpoint, the remarks of "a
Bachelor On marriage. | quite agree
with the bachelor when he points out the
disadvantages of the married state, owing
to the unsatisfactory character and general
behavior of those who offer themselves as
candidates. The girls, he complains. are
not at all to his taste. But has he ever re-
fiected how a man, such as he is, is likely
to be regarded by a marriageable girl, OF
what kind of fate would await the woman
compelled to endure his weaknesses foi
the term of her natural life? My own ex-
p~erience may perhaps interest him. For
my own marriage | have a good xcu to
offer. / married simply because it was the
only way of getting a living recognized as
respectable by the society in which | lived.
| had wished to go into business, but no
capital was forthcoming. had ambition
to be learned and distinguish myself as a
writer, but the idea was soon snuffed out.
| would have fain been a nurse, a teacher,
a lady help, anything to gain both exper-
fence and money, but difficulties were in
superable. | wanted some work in life: |
married the least Objectionable of the
STRENGTHENING, c~igar-smoking bachelors
who came to my mothers dances, and |
have faithfully tended him for twenty long
years. | have dismissed him every morn
ing with a smile, aud welcomed him home
with a smell of savory meats such as his
soul loyeth. | have always seen that his
soup was salted to his mind. and his butch
er's bill kept down to the level of his in
come. In addition, | have born him as
many children as he exacted. A typical
union this. | brought to it youth, limo
cence, ambition for love and joy. He con-
tributed the bread and cheese, together
with a fading youth and whatever remain
ed over a life of pleasure. For his own
credit the servants are well clad and fed.
and so am l.. The difference lies in this,
that they are paid in cash, | only in kind.
They give certain services only, and are
free to come and go at pleasure. body
and soul, am a possession Of my masters
from whom death onlyean set me free. Men
are always full of pity for the spinster, de-
priyed of the luxury of such companion
ship; but | think that Max O'Rell was the
only man who ever had a glimmering that
to be a wife to a commonplace beer-drink-
ing man was not to live in a paradise. Per-
haps it is vain to expect men to sympathize
with women. They never know what it is
to grow old without having tasted the joys
of youth, what it is never to have one day
of freedom such as men enjoy while they
are still chil,ireil-neyer even for n short
year to see the glories and wonders of this
world. This is to die before we have be-
gun to live-forever to suckle fools and
chronicle small beer, A bachelor asks if
it is not time these unfortunate social
conditions should be modified. | think
they should. The bachelor has no hos
tility to marriage" neither have women,
it is only to the kind of man who elects to
marry them that ONE have any hostility.
1t is evident enough that thousands of men
take no pains to make themselves loveable,
or have none of the qualities likely to in
spire love. Try as we will, life with them
must be one of long endurance. Strange
that one hears so much talk about the edu-
cation of women to be good wives and
mothers, and never a word of the training
of men to be tolerable husbands and faith
ers. Everything in a boys education
tends the other way. From the time he
leaves his mothers apron strings, other
men teach him to despise and ridicule wo-
men, to trample on their little liberties, to
indulge in habits that disgust them, to de-
grade that manhood which woman would
fain love and reverence.