The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-05-16

rGmetY unpleasant ana n$0tesS, | nave gradually trained myself into the other extreme, and generally bear the misfor- tunes of my friends with philosophical indifference that is vey composing. On this occasion, however, forgst my cyni- cism and found myself running under that broiling sun, shaking my hst with my heait in my mouth, at the conduc. tor, and demanding in the most authori. tative manner that he stop the train. From the depot to the tunnel was about half mile; to accomplish this distance the train and idiot occupied some twenty minutes. The passengers, cro wded at windows and oa the platforms, took as lively an interest in the affair as the en- tire population of Glen Cove that accom- panied the train and backed the idiot It was godsend to the passengers, and they expressed their satisfaction by the liveliest betting and cheers, first for the locomotive and then for its strange com petitor.
 It was neck and peck between life and the locomotive. A false step, stumble, and the huge mass of roaring. throbbing frail body of the man, who so strangely impeded its progress And such result was imminent; for the poor fellow, ex- hausted by excitement and ever exer ton, staggered at times, and at times reeled as If about to fall, in way to make me shudder.
 That such would probably have been the result became painfully apparent, when an abrupt and somewhat unex pected termination was put to the cruel sport. The man stationed at the mouth of the tunnel and employed to keep its murky depths clear of Instructions, sud- denly seized the youth, at the risk of his own life, and threw him with some vio- lence to one side. Such was the effort that both rolled over, and the huge loco motive, giving a shrin scream of triumph, dived into the tunnel followed by the long train, that disappeared as if the earth had opened up and swallowed it.
 sat down at the mouth of the subter- ranean excavation quite exhausted as the crowd dispersed, and from the mouth of the dark entrance was pleased to find a cool damp air that came out in puffs, as if dragon were coiled up within and panted out its cold, clammy breath. I asked the old watchman a series ot idle questions, of statistical sort, such as a man under the circumstances always in- dulges in. He grune ed out the exact length of the tunnel, the time required to construct 1t, the accidents that occurred within his remembrance, and altogether in response to my leading questions, ex- hibited good deal of information on tunnels. For a man to know one thing we'll is power. It is better, however. to believe you know some one thing and impart the information to your friends It is bore at best and just as we'll when 1t takes the shape of a tunnel.
 Having exhausted the hole in the ground-and really, come to think of it, there was nothing in it-l spoke of the late race.
 "C,azy jackass 1" quoth the sententious guardian of the excavation; he'll git killed yet, and sooner the better for all consumed"
 "Why, do they often put him up to that?'
 No, not frequent. They doit on that train sometimes, for they hate the con. ductor. Onct, long ago, it wasn't needed. He used to run ahead of every train, clear through the tunnel, a warn;n' people of They switched that out uv him. Now the ornary cussei puts him up to it."
 "Qdeer sort of insanity"
 "lsn't it1 and he was onct a bright feller-a rale schollard."
 "lndeed?"
 "Yes. was onct, bu. left his senses in this tunnel"
 "Why, how was that?"
 "Well, you see, he's the son of old Judge Conrad, of these parts-only child, at that-and was sent to college, and no end of trouble taken and money spent to finish and furnish up his intellects. When he come home to study law, what does he do but take after little girl named Mary Grubbs, da'ter of the cooper, an she was poor as pig an purty as a painted wagon. We'll, guess she was about the handsomest cri,ter in this part of the vineyard. Len Conrad was struck, l tell you, after Polly, as we called her, an don't wonder for her hair was as soft and light as silk on early corn, an she had the handsomest teeth, an the bigge t, wonderfullest dark eyes, an an angeltsTous skin. But neither she nor her old cooperin' dad had a cent, so the Conrads, bein' toploftical mahogany high parties, just shut down on her."
 "The old, old story"
 "l don't know ef i,'s so old. Per'aps you've heerd it afore, au' can save my wind"
 ..I mean that the course of true love never does run smooth"
 "Ohl that's it, is it2"
 "No offense, old man. But proceed with your yarn and tell me how Len Con- rad left his senses in the tun-ei That's what was . comin' to when you put i. your chin music. When Len found the family was forninst the courtin' he took to meetin' her unbeknownst. That was found out, and then it was de- creed that Len should be sent to Yourope. The evenin' upon Lens departure he meets his girl, av course, am they meandered nateriy little too late, am undertook to make a short cut to the cooper house through the tunnel. Isaw l q ekA =