New-York tribune., 1885-03-18
THE TALK or THE DAY.

tts fend cempensati0ns
THE TALK or THE DAx
william Henry Hurlbert is modest he doesn't vaae
TAs World, but only the italian mission
Blind Tom IL the only distinguished vistor here whe
sssad With the Egyptian 6asr1sss ~ ts o. ty CoSnc
lNew-0rleans Picayune
An Arizona editor dscourses thus on the foolshnesso Of
Offices seeking: I'VE don't want any ONCE We Try v
eiye our russsrs bang-up paper every weok and we
find that doing this takss ell our time wnen an eoitoe
has made the round Of all the saloons er tems dgesed
all the war news from the eoudan and cassnea al tns
paid locals he has done good weeks work ana should
not be called upon to bear the responsibilities OF any
Office We are confident that President Cleveland.ww
find men to Ill all the Offices without taking u.s. 1--we
did not believe so We would gladly sacrifice our pr1Vau
business for the good Of the country"
arm going to get married." said he. as he placed
hand npeu the counter IS large as Dutch cheese ans
Is customary" said the pretty bakery girl now
the calling Of the bridegroom, For musician now We
have an cake. for who has no calling and lives
unon his friends the sponge cake, for newspaper
psragrapher spice cake and 50 on; what is your calling
arm q pugilist."
@Theh YOU want pound cake. "-tBoston Courier.
The Morning Noon is the name OF paper just started
In California
First" Charming girl. that Miss Lney jack" Second
-" Il
didn't know she knew you u"-tHarvard Lampoon
Gilbert and sullIyans Mikado" appears to be per-
yaded with exravagant humor that cnaractef-
lied their other works Here two specimens OF the
lbrett0:
"ryou want to know who We are
We gentlemen OF Japan!
On many q vase and jar,
We figure in lively paint,
With attitudes queer and quaint;
You're wrong IL you think 1t amt"
three little maids from school are..we.
Pert as schoolgirls well can be!
Three little maids who, all unwary,
Come from ladies' seminary
@Mr Rossa" said Mr.. Joyce. an English sparrow haa
built a nest outside OF the Office wlndow' a.s...
English cheek indeed Put dynamite bomb under the
nest and blow it up -tBoston Courier
The London Board of Trade has perhaps undessnediy
created alarm among the of the British Isles In
report recently sent to Parliament by that body afsen-
ton was directed to the fact that lsl,9oo males
em0rated last year to the United States and Canada
while the number OF female emgrants was only iZ2346
This shows that where two wvmen leave the country
three men follow thein and as statistics nave oeeh pre-
sened to prove that in some Of our New-Engand manu-
featuring towns women predominate, they may ihops
that some OF the surplus OF 5000 men who came ove
from Great Britain last year may drift their way
weakly paper In the interest OF tho coored race. has
been started at Augusta, Ga. An editorial psrasraph
,akes ms view the colored situation In
tSe soit6 II only remains for to educate ou!
cnidpen hny LANDS make our homes pure. dignidei and
comfortable. and money aud every otner rght wiz
SoIIow said the man who asked how many
rabbits he had killed When get tna one aui ae<
and another will have two."-lPeoria Transcript
Nelson Godfrey Humphrey. of Leroy, Ill., whose book
of poems Random Shots" has recently been published,
appears to be gradually usurping the place so long hea
nv the Sweet Singer OF Michigan. Here are two very
| characteristic "shots":
The modest mules did watch us pass
Their masters shield In tolng;
Near Cornth sheep were moving grass
The hogs a vale subsolllnS.
Two days had passed. on Mobile Bay
The oyster shells were breaking;
The ocean steamer Ou Its way
For foreign countries making
uanrv Watterson hasn't been heard from for so Ions
that there Is suspicion he has eloped with the sareyed
Goddess Of Reform II would relieve Mr. Cleveland Oh
reat embarrassment II this should turn out to be true
Mr. Mike Hovan a popular conductor on the Utah and
i, IN regard TO the new railroad rules On and
after the 5th the wlii be IN accoidanco
with & sas ne" Se nmb.red d from to "a Yesterday
| Uo,an was busy watching gentleman changing ,ne
q q hs ocsSe TnsS1 Sy SnSer the other in
INK The unwa-y conductor noticed the time, ara
When Se was called to orer ty his friend for gross
violation the rules aud told that ne should Lass
| said fourteen. ."-lsat Lake City Tribune.
II the heirs OF Aaneke Jams have much time to
multiply, when the estate is divided up among them
there will not be enough per capita to buy each one
good dinner
Jsks-"I tell you there nothing Ike looking after
| she pennies Why some pay out 500 year In
| streer.car fares alone. Just think of It."
aNo air don't; walk No matter what the weather.
walk to and from my place OF business every aAS ~
| you see how much save" ro.,, .., ,,.ays
.Oh no; there plenty Of beer saloons to rest In
Philadelphia Call.