Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1885-07-22

professie will bs paralyzsd, and he
will eithe9 AVE to skirmish around by
soma othAl kind Of employment, or 60
over the \ to the poor.house. It will
be pretty ugh on him, but every
man for h nself' il the motto in these
days MOI tidy up the children, wash
their fAcGo and comb their hair, and
well scon have an artistic group Of
Mr.. Hid 1esworth prepared plate.
and whom Do children were pronounced
ready, be Qfranged them in group,
threw 10th over the back of the
camera auN his head, and prepared to
focus" thSm.
"HumpA you are all there, but there
seems 70 ~ too much promiscuousness
about theSRoup. Joe. place your right
hand on Husan's shoulder, and stop
your conf Snded snickering. Caroline,
stop scsst1 ~ your nose; and Tom.
dent twi41 }Qur head of trying to look
around sonr mother. Sary Ann,
stxnd fanSfSf ~ the left. % they can't
see you. Now, children, keep right
still, and look cheerful and pleased, as
if you had 10 cents to buy taffy, or I'll
skin you-d'ye hear? Great universe
just look at 'em !" and he abandoned his
camera, rushed up to the children,
bump ed their heads together two or
three times, and posed them again.
"Now remain in that positionl" he
commanded, peering through the lens.
''Don't move, or I'll thrash you all.
Now the thing has commenced"
Qn ~nv,H A~,nA Ahn c1nkh oNl <~~rnl -
his watch.
"There-that'll do he said, replac-
ing the cloth, and withdrawing the
slide. "Now, let's see!" examining the
plate after the negative had been devel-
oped. "One-two--three-four. you
are all here, anyway. Now. Tom, bring
in Topsy, the cat, and we'll have her
photographed in jiffy."
Topsy was placed on chair, and
had her picture tooken," rs Tom ex-
planned. Then, Carlo, the dog, was in
troduced and submitted to Q similar
torture.
"Sary Ann" said Higglesworth,
"we'll finish the days operations by
taking my own photograph. I'll get
the machine ready, put in the plate,
and take seat in front of the camera.
When / say "ready," remove the cloth,
count fifty, and then replace it"
Mrs Higglesworth followed the in
structions, but not without manifesting
considerable trepidation.
SWELL, there appears to be some
thing on the plate" observed Higgles-
worth, examining the negative, "and l
guess it is your husband, Sary Ann.
Now we have taken pictures of the en-
tire family, without any fuss, and at
very trifing cost. The amachoor pho
tographic outfit is great boon, and I
wouldn't part with it for ten times its
cost, if I couldn't get another. Wen
print the pictures tomorrow, il the day
proves clear.
Next day the sun shone resplendent-
~. and the process of making the
prints was commenced. Mrs. Higgles-
worth's was the first picture printed.
"Let me see it, Reuben" said Mrs.
H.. reaching for the print, which her
husband was gazing at in open-eyed
astonishment as it professional
beauty?'
Goodness gracious, Sary Ami" he
calculated, still keeping his eyes fixed
on the photograph. "Was-was there
dime museum freak looking over your
shoulder when shot off the muzzle OF
the contrivance?"
"Why, no." returned Mrs. Higgles-
worth, taking the picture from her hus-
bands hand. "What foolish ques--
Heavens, Reuben! What in the world
is it, anyway"
well, if it isn't what is it, give
it up" he replied, perplexedly. "The
lens must have slipped an eccentric, or
something. You are endowed with con-
siderable chin, Sary Ann. but not quite
such profusion as is exhibited in this
photograph; and / admit that you
haven't four eyes, and one of them
don't slant around to your left ear.
And look at that right ear! You didn't
hold q palm-leaf fan alongside your
head, did ye? And one of your hands
is not as corpulent as a sugur cured
ham"
"And that's the way you have made
me look prettier than o professional
beauty, is it? Reuben Rigglesworth,
if thought this was one Of your Jokes,
I'd-Td-"
And she placed her handkerchief to
her eyes.
"Now. mother" said Reuben, sooth-
ingly. @don't cry about it. A amachoor
photographer is liable to make blum
der at first. ! must have aimed the
machine too high, and brought down
one OF Barnum's curiosities which hap.
pened to be passing ct the time. Well
now look at the chiidren's group.
Thatll be beauty"
The print was taken from the mega
tive. and Higglesworth gazed upon il
with an expression of horror.
"Is it all right, Reuben 2" asked his
wife, craning her head over his shoul.
der, while tho children stood around
with pleasurable expectancy depicted
upon their faces.
"Sary Ann. it is rot all right. It sp.
pears to be something like puzzle de-
partment, and might answer for the
map Of the war in Egypt Some fend
has tampered with the machine. There
are four figures here. but they don't
look like civilized human beings
Here's one got head as big a. water
bucket apparently, while another is nc
larger than . hickory nut; and the
feet look like snow shovels. and here
are three heads melted together, and
Well, Iswow II / ever saw such a group
since / was bornl"
"Perhaps." suggested the wife. "the
lens slipped another eccentric; or may.
be you aimed it too high and hit band
OF savages in the street? u"
"Pop.s broke in four youngsters, slet
me see IL!
"Geeroosalum!" vociferated Tom, iii
this doesn't look worse than comic
valentine. Which ones me and which
Susie ?"
sChildren." /" said Higglesworth. "we'll
put this away for further inspection
and now let us behold the counterfeit
presentment Of your father, the anna
choor Photographer"
And what he beheld nearly parslyzed
him.
sWha--what's this?r he gasped
~This picture looks more like one oi