The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-11-12
THE CiyIL-SERVICE COMMISSION.
The Composition Of the Late Board, and the
Makeup of the Present One.

Ihe composition of the Late Board, and the
Makeup of the Present One.
Gath's New York Letter.
Mr.. Cleveland ia now to be tried on his gen.
uine courage. He has already changed the Civil
service Commission, and made it not much more
than a newspaper screen before . furnace fire.
Its integrity is already gone. 1t was at first
composed of the honest crank, Eaton, who got it
from college professor from somewhere out
West, who believed in it as Republican, and of
a personal adherent of Mr.. Pendleton who had
expected to get new career in this country by
fathering in the Senate a proposition which
seemed to him eminently select and arstocratc,
like the Order Of the Garter. With the original
Civil-service Commission and the President and
the mugwumps guarding the infant prodigy,
there was some reason to suppose that civil
service would become fact. The new Commits
sion will do just what they are told, all except
old Mr.. Eaton, who has twice resigned and who
10 brought Harvard, like Lazarus from the tomb,
to prove that this is still life issue and no snde
miracle The poor old man Eaton is hungry,
and his bowels are loose; his teeth are shackly
and he is nearsighted. Wrestling with this
giant problem of the immaculate conception
number two has deranged his instru,nentalities.
But he is on deck, and will occupy hereafter the
position with his associates of those secretaries
obtained by Joe Smith to write out the Mormon
Bible while he translated it from the golden
plates. Joe got behind a curtain and put on a
pair OF pebble goggles. and read with tremendous
energy something he was making I'D out of his
nedu lie tOlQ the secretaries that they dare not
look upon the golden plates lest they be struck
blind He was the holy element alone all rolled
up into one ball. and he could read the plates by
using the sacred spectacles. So that civil
service commission took down the Book of
Mormon. and Joe generally concluded each days
seance With clog dance. So it will be with the
new Civil-service Commission, composed of
Trenholm, Edgerton and old Mr.. Eaton The
Cabinet will read the Book of Mormon to them.
and they will take it down. 1t will be announced
that the following persons have passed the ex-
animation and have got the Tory chrome afore-
said. The commission will humbly record their
names Nobody who ever was Republican can
get the average. 1t will be between the Repub-
licans and the Democrats like the Clown in the
circus counting out the pumpkins to the Panta-
loon. He first takes his share as follows: 1.-TWO
and seven are three and fifteen make four"
Then he counts Pantaloons part saying: Zone
and one is nine, and one is twenty -seven Panta-
loon does not quite understand it, but the Repub-
licans will We already hear that Mr.. Sterling
of Brooklyn, whom George William Curtis has
printed in Harpers Weekly as a countenance to
be avoided. has passed high up in the average,
and he presently will tear the wig off Mr.. Eaton
and perhaps be Civil-service Commissioner
himself. The President is thus trimming to-
ward the east wind. But he will need all that
indifference his friends have claimed for him if
he finds that the current begins to set toward
Hill or some other Democrat from this State for
the presidential place.