The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1885-05-23
Bill I'VE on Ell Mahdi.

ers along the White Nile. no one
thought that today he would he the
champion heavy weight prophet OF
the known world. 1t shows what
can be done by brave. courageous
little boy even in foreign land.
In appearance he is brunette Of
about the style of the successful meer-
chaum pipe. He does not dress as
we do, but wears white turban that
looks some like an Etruscan hens
nest. On chilly days he adds other
articles of apparel to this turban,
though during the summer months
that is sufficient for evening dress. In
the morning he puts on his turban,
buckles a six-shOoter around his waist
and he is dressed. 1t dnsen't take
Mahdi long TO make his toilet.
Years ago he decided that he would
retire to a lonely island in the Nile
and put himself in training for
prophet, so he crawled into cave
and lived there on whatever he could
get hold of, While others were down
at KhartouIn, having good time at
the skating rink, Mahdi remained in
his gloomy cave, setting up the pins
to 90 into the prophet business and
murder the kings English.
Some people began to hear of Ell
Mahdi, and as he put card in all the
morning papers of the Soudan, he at
once had all the prophesying he could
do and had to hire an amanuensis or
assistant prophet to help him out.
During the holidays, when trade was
brisk. the Mahd had to sit up and
prophesy till 10 or II O'Clock at night.
His real name is Mohammed Ach-
med, and he was the son of a petty
sheik, whose name have forgotten.
This man was an inferior person and
very ordinary sheik, / am told
just such sheik as you could go in
and find on the ten-cent counters of
the SOudan anywhere.
Mohammed Achmed for long
time showed one of the prevailing
characteristics of a tramp. and so they
began to educate him as fakIr. A
fakir is man who has permission to
ramble through the country, chiSel.
ing people out of money and grOce.
ries in the name of religion. He is a
sort of Oriental gospel bum, whose
business is to go ar"und over the
country weeping over the sins fpeo-
pie who are too busy to be hypocrites
These fakirs are always devout, hun.
cry and sad. They yearn for bright
Immortality, but they are in no great
rush about acquiring il. They are
perfectly willing to wait till the f gyp-
tians pullets run out. am glad that
we have no fakirs in America.
By and by Mohammed Achmed
got call to rise up William Riley
and gather the clans of the Soudan
together. He went to them and told
them in confidence that he was the
only genuine, all wool prophet on
the Nile, and if they wanted some
fun, to get their double barrel shot
guns and join the gang. They did
50. None of them ever did anything
at home to obtain II livelihood, 50
they could go away on the war
path all summer AID their business
wouldn't suffer at all.
They then proceeded to murder the
kings English, who had come there
to conquer and acquire their sand pile.
The Arabian style Of warfare is pc
culiar. 1t consist largely in drinking
alkali water on their part and in re-
curing their enemies to do the same
for ninety days. So it becomes simply
aquesti0n of who has the firme-t and
most durable BeSSemer steel bowels.
No one but Bedouin would have
thought Of such Il style of wa fare. 1t
is not. therefore. question of c0ur-
age or everlasting justice, it is ques-
ton of who can drink concentrated
I've all summer and take his alinpn-
tary canal home with him in the fall.
In the battle, the Arab charge is
peculiar in the extreme. The Arab
does not stand up in line of battle for
an hour, while the commanding Off
Ger gaIIops up and down the line on a
"heavy" horse and the enemy pou:s
CALLING fire into his ranks. He sails
up toward the enemy. waves his
Oriental night shirt in the Egyptian
air. shoots some one and goes away.
When the battle ground is examined
on the following day. it is discovered
that eight hundred brave and hand
some English soldiers are killed and
one old m0th-eaten Arab has stepped
ON his Gothic shirt tail and sprained
ankle.
FL Mahdi is not bad looking man
at all, and the report that he has lost
his teeth, so that when he gives his
oruers he has to gum Arabic, is not
true.
BILL NYE.