The Arkansaw traveler., 1885-08-15
Why It is the Hotses, Placee
LAlex E. Sweet, in Texas Siftings.


 What an inconvenience it is that we cannot have bill of weather, by which we could order what we want, as we do from bill of fare! Some eccentric per sons, like myself, like oysters raw. That kind of weather would be very popular in New York just now. As it is we have stewed weather seasoned with cayenne pepper didn't intend saying anything about the weather. It is not an entirely new subject to write about, but when the atmospheric influences knock unoffeud- ing men down on the streets, why should the press be silent?
 The summer heat of New York is diff ferent from the climatic warmth of any other city in the United States. The in- candescent glow that gently fans the brow of the New Yorker, who does not get out of town, has been compared to that of little town named Sheol.
 Since have been in New York I've lost all respect for the thermometer. | hate liar, and with the exception of facts and figures, the thermometer is the most unmitigated Eli Perkins outside of the ranks of journalism. The New York thermometer will brazenly maintain that the temperature is only say 98 degrees, when hundreds of the best and most truthful citizens of New York assert that it is much hotter. What anght to be done with such lying thermometer
 There is popular superstition going the rounds that heat of the same grade has the same taste the world over. This is blankety blank lie. It is cooler in Texas when the thermometer indicates I2o degrees in the shade than it is in | New York when the thermometer only | registers 9r degrees If you were to saw out chunk of Texas heat and put it in a | New York refrigerator there would be no | necessity for ice in that said refrigerator |
 If the New York thermometer were to | tell the truth and shame the devil, it | would indicate local heat of five or six | hundred, but the New York thermometer, like the New York press, never tells the truth, for fear 1t may injure the trade of the place.
 may be little reckless in some of my statements, but am SO designedly. | l want to meet Ananias as soon as possi- ble, so can cool off 1 yearn to have my ears frost bitten once more. am weary of being boiled.
 The question IS often asked: "How is 1t that so many people are sunstruck in New York?" will try and unravel the mystery.
 The man who goes out on the streets ot New York in pursuit of business or re- creation, has to compete with three dis tnct sorts of red-hot calidity.
 In the first place there is the direct yer tical, unqrenched, white-hot sunshine. that comes from the sun, and smites him on the top of his dome of thought with the emphasis of steam yielded sledge hammer. If the man who is out on the streets in the interest of science, has a chunk of ice, wrapped up in a bleak towel, in the top of his hat, he may be able 10 stand off heat No. |. Put heat No. down at 95 degrees Fahrenheit.
 Heat No. comes at the scientists sideways. The stone or brick walls of the houses are busy week in and week out absorbing heat, very much as Dan McGary, of the Houston Age, absorbs beer. The stone walls absorb the genial glow, and then throw it cut at the baking, boiling, rocking, unfrozen pedestrian. This reflected heat cannot be mitigated by wearing frigid towels in the hat. The best way is to dodge it and go to Coney Island Put this sunshining glow down at So degrees. We have now s degrees, plus So degrees, which makes I75 de- grees of atmospheric influences.
 Thea comes heat Mo- }. It comes from below Most of the cooking is done under the sidewalks. It is the meanest influence of the lot. It is mixed up with the smell of fried oleo- and various other dire aromas Heat No. } can be put down-no it can't be put down. but it can be estimated at 100 degrees Fahrenheit.
 The New York pedestrian has therefore 10 contend with o5 degrees of direct heat, plus So degrees Of reflected heat, plus 100 degrees of kitchen heat, plus the smell of ried oleomargarine, and 95 6s4 BPS other vile smells, all of which amounts to one whew
 A Cheap Pair of Pictures.