Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1885-09-26

When they asked. "Do you chew
He replied. Yes, do;
I'm wcgniar wefch Of a w0ugh.
The Northwest
20. where docs beauty linger?" de-
mands a Quaker City poetess. As a
usual thing she fingers in the parlor
until her mother has cleaned mp the
kitchen. boston lost.
A pea-shelling machine has been In
vented which eau do rs much work as
several hundred women in the same
length Of time. But then it never stops
to talk. Aew York tribune.
A Harrisburg widow recently eloped
with two coachmen. Most women have
q profound admiration for man who
can drive pair OF horses without rum
ming into every other turnout on the
road.-NeW York Granite.
Hes a man of large calibre," re-
marked Jones to Brown. speaking of
an acquaintance. "IndeedP" was the
reply; ''how do YOU, make that outP''
ssHe's a great bore. :" COR murmured
Brown, and tainted away. Merchant
Traveller.
II declare, Mr.. Blank, said guest
10 the landlord of Bar Harbor hotel,
.syour table is even worse than it was
last year" And the indignant Boni-
face answered without reflection;
THAT is impossible, sir. "-Boston COM
merctal Bulletin.
A New Orleans religious weekly says:
1.-The white race is, we believe, already
beginning to decay" This is sad news,
but it win not cause as much conster-
..o4t<x.. -. a1x..r .9.a rfora xvna1lA ha
announcement that the horse race had
begun to decay. -NorrfStoa0n Herald.
A man called on the Chief of Police
Of Allegheny few days ago and said
he had been robbed of $50, 900, 600.
The man Is supposed to have been \
curve pitcher for q professional base
ball club, and had just been paid half
of his season. salary. -NOrristOscB Her
dld
A poetess MARBLES: ~ love to sing
when am glad-song is the echo OF
my gladness; love to sing when am
sad, for song makes sweet my very
Sadness" From which we infer that
she loves to sing. Her neighbors have
not yet been heard from. - orriStosOn
Herald.
Verasopht- You are looking charm
ing tonight, Estellc. EstelIe- Charm-
ing Is too cold word. Verasopht---
Then I'll call you demons" Estelle
Lemons. sir DO you mean TO insult
me? Verasopht-My darling. you do
not read the papers, or you would learn
that lemons are very, very dear. fbtl-g
ddelphiG CAL.
A Swanton 4-year-old, who has
drum and is not slow to beat it, heard
hand organ the other day, and was
particularly struck with the fact that
the organ grinder took up il collection.
After the ..musiclann had departed the
little fellow remarked: II don't drum
any more only for money. ''-ot. -At6ans
(N.) Messenger.
An absent-minded Lawrence woman
went down the street the other day
wearing three bustlcs wlicn she had
ordered sent up to her house to try
on. The accumulation oil hair-cloth
and wire gave peculiar hang to the
back breadths of her dress and attract
ed considerable attention. - laurence
GLASS. american.
An exchange says that some go to
church'to weep while others 90 to sleep.
Some 90 their wives TO please; their
conscience others 70 TO ease. Some 20
to hear the preacher; others like the
solo screecher. Bows go to reconnoitre;
girls 20 because they ougnter. Many
20 for sage reflections; precious lew to
help collections. Fad RtCcy .IdCssAce.
A bashful young man who was afraid
TO propose TO his sweetheart induced
her to lire at him with pistol, which
he assured her was only loaded with
powder, and after she natl done SO tell
down and pretended to be dead. She
threw herself wildly upon the body,
calling him her darling ana her oe-
loved. whereupon he got up and mar
ried her. -AiiteyScsts lva.) Aepu 6iGcetA.