davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

SALMON p. CHASE
II a spider had crawled into an inkstand
and started on his peregrinations he might
have made some scratches like the Chief JUS
tice used to dignity with the title of signature.
<6e-@%o~7
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

The man who set the Thames on fire is, by
English proverb, considered the cleverest
fellow Of his time; but Of late days some
hero--name unknown-if he has not quite
succeeded in this supposed impossible task
has at all events set the Thames bank In a
smolder which 1t has necessitated the sum-
moning Of the engineer corps to entinguish.
For some years the accumulated rubbish
from the arsenal-truck- loads Of ashes, Stag,
cotton-waste, and such like-has been
dumped down at the rivers edge to make an
embankment against the sncroaching tide.
BY some means the infammable matter in
this heterogeneous pile caught ire and has
been burning in q quiet, subterranean way
for the last month; and, all ordinary means
having failed to extinguish IL, the royal en-
gineers have solved the difficulty in true
Gordian.knot style by cutting the embank-
ment in two by broad trench, thus pre-
venting the progress Of the smolder, which
was approaching dangerously near the
powder magazines -r.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
VISITING THE SICK"
why MIR. wilkinson No Longer Makes an
"An Night" OF 1t.


ISan Francisco Chronicle "Understones.
don't know whether it is due to the sim-
plicity Of womankini, or the absence of the
inventive faculty in man, that the same old
reasons and excuses 60 always. / believe
that Jacob told Leah when he wanted to go
out on n spree, that he had some business
with the neighboring ranch, and am quite
convinced that old Noah very frequently
told his wife that he was going to visit
sick friend. / doubt il Abraham did not
steal to the masquerade ball OF the period
and roll home in dignifed and autocratic in
toxication some time about the breaking OF
the morning Anyhow, it seems that the
man who will invent a new excuse which
man can give to his wife for staying out all
night can get the biggest kind OF a fortune
out of the royalties on it. A few nights ago
young Wilkinson wanted to go to a masque-
rade ball.
any darling" he said, as he put on his
overcoat and felt for his ticket "Jones is
very sick. lam afraid he will not live
through the night. promised him I'd sit
with him a whole night, and l guess I'll be
very late"
"Poor feIlow!' said she. ats so good Of
you. Stay-here's some nice jelly; you'd
better take pot of it to him. I'm so sorry,
and he's bachelor without any sisters or a
mother. Alfred, perhaps / had better go
with you If he is so i'll"
A gleam of grim suspicion flashed across
his face as he looked at her. Was this sar-
casml She was perfectly ingenious
mo, my dear. You needn't. He's too Ill
to care about your visit"
="Well, dear, come home as soon as You
can"
He had to take the pot Of jelly, which he
threw into a vacant lot as he went on. 1t
seems that Jones, who was OF course quite
well, really wanted to SEQ young Wilkinson
on the most urgent business He hunted for
him at his well known resorts all night
and about 1l:30 o'clock he and friend
took coupe and drove up to his house.
The friend jumped out aud rang the bell.
He did not know Mrs. Wilkinson. That
lady stuck her heal out Of the up-stair win
dow.
"Who's thatP
@I want to see Mr.. Wilkinson"
"Who are your
At this point Jones. who did know Mrs
w, jumped out of the coupe.
ais that you, Mrs Wilkinson
yes Who Is thatT
"Jones," said he. "Will you tell Alfred
WhnL W soe niLh oh eho hioSS ANAPoA Ss@"S ~
ness for a minuteP
GMr. Wilkinson has not come home yet"
And the window went down with a snap
At 6 a. m. Mr. Wilkinson came home. His
wife looked at him and asked him very
quietly:
allow is Mr.. Jonesp
"Oh, he'1 much better. We got him 70
sleep about o'clock and then left"
Then the band began to play, and young
Wilkinson is still dancing TO the music,
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
Perhaps This Explains It
fChicago Ledger j

In browsing through history the mind Is
often dazed in its attempts at trying to COM
prehend how mankind managed to endure
the trials heaped upon it in the days when
persecution went about like prairie on fire
seeking whom it might reduce to ashes. But
In those days profanity itself was regarded
as a species OF piety, and the man who could
shoot out an expression strong enough to
stand alone, without winking, no doubt
possessed advantages that clergyman put
ting up stove in these degenerate times
cannot enjoy.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
A Wicked Editor.
mn cl.lx~lta GALL

! --""- -"-"- TTIIiHueIpiH NuH =
Irate Subscribed want to see the fellow
that wrote this article. as ....sa
Western Office Boy-Must been the ed
itor, guess. -
$50 suppose. Where is hei Where is he,
sayF
"Hes not in.n 3
"Oh, he amt in, amt hea Amt in, chi
Well, where Is her at
.sHe's attendin' the funeral Of man what
called to see him on Monday"
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
FUN Crossing the Desert

When Stewards column was crossing tne
desert some OF the soldiers sang until their
throats were too dry for the Itterance OF
smother musical note, bu. even then they
bad a hearty laugh for every humorous in-
cident Oae guarIsman, chatting an Etni-
oman follower, said he had discovered 81
LAT why negro's lips were 20 thick, for his
own felt as IL they had swollen TO three
lines their natural size, and be was SURE
thew would never get their beauty Dacs
svnin il lie had to make many desert
rIaas
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
Angelic Qualifications

KENTUCKY State JourhaII
aMamma, IL die would / be an angelT
asked little Emma.
aYes, DEAR :,
aand II I die would be an angel, tooP
asked Johnny. -.
aNo think not. You are too wild.
aToo Wild That's list the kind what
makes the fastest fiyin' angels Look at the
wild birds sec how fast they kin fly III
net coph leave Emma away behind"
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
Another Poem from Tsunysoa-

As an American magazine has just offered
Tennyson $1,000 for four-verss posm Or
more than three times ito sum GJidmitn
received for sThe Vicar Of Wakefield, and
Is be probably reals none Of the severe crifi-
csms on his work recently passed. by N
American press. be. doubtless. u nof coz
scious Of any loss Of popularity.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

italian papers are bewailing tho sxtsnt and
intensity OF the emigration fever among tbs
peasantry. Thsy say that the ship-loads Of
emigrants who are taken from Italy TO
America ara draining Italy Of It's most pro-
duct:ve factors The tide Of emigration,
they say, il assuming proportions which ID
calamitous to tho state, and they instance
Tho fact thas one project alone issued last
year 6,000 passports for emigrants to
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

Idon't know whether you know IL or not,
but nearly every prominent star, and many
of the most successful theatres, are not run
by the men whose names are printed ~
managers, half 70 much as by some quiet in
dividual who holds tbs position Of the power
behind the throne, and who Is not generally
known 70 the public g the head OF the firm
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

The residences Of foreign diplomats ct
Washington, which ara technically foreign
territories, are not taxed, neither do the
minister's nor attaches residing In them pay
poll-taxss or any taxss upon personal pro.
perty.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
FOR SALE.

A No. Hay Ranch, situated on Race
Track creek, between the railroad and the
Butte road The creek runs through II from
west 20 east making it one OF the most de-
sirable farming or winter grazing ranches IN
Deer Lodge valley. u IL all under fence and
IL within three-fourihs of mile OF railroad
switch. Terms, cash; OF reasonable time,
with good security.
Apply 10 ED. III. IRVINE,
ol0I1 Deer Lodge, NJ. 7.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

Senator John p Jones, who was recently
chosen at the Republican caucus a, Carson
City, New, to succeed himself in the
representation of that state in the United
States senate, is the only born Englishman
in that body. His parents brought him to
this country in 1881. when he was less than
year old and settled in the northern part
OF Ohio, where his schooling was obtained.
In the early days of the California gold ex-
element he became one of the pioneer set
tiers, engaging in farming and mining in
one of the inland counties, which he subse-
quently represented in both houses OF the
state assembly. In 1867 he went 10 Nevada,
and has been one of the most successful
mine owners of that state. He has already
served two terms in the United States
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
cheafinu CharIty.

II Is said that OF 10000 patients who
every year gock TO the best LONDON nos
pitals for treatment, fully one hall are
abundantly able ~ pay for what they 10
,,eiye Is charity.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
The Unconscious subiimity Of Youth.

Nothing Is more sublime than mothers
love, unless It be the first pair Of pants which
she makes for her little boy. And happily
the little innocent never knows the sensation
he makes when he Is hoisted into his fond
mothers work and trots around with the
sitting down curves Of them In front Of him.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
No Use for . Mean Man.


The world has no use for q rnean man. A
drunkard, liar. . swearer, thief, .
tramp a swindler, murderer may have
good traits and have some sphere Of ussful-
nsss in the world, but mean msn, pure and
simpls-God wastsd mud when He made
him # sE#A a6N
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

A firm Of Connecticut bsd-quiit manur
fActurers have purchased the sntiro village
of Fitchviile, consisting OF two largo stone
mills, twenty-ssven tanemsnt housss, .
church. school-housa. and public hall
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
Paris and American journalism.
INorrisfoswn Herald

A monthly Journal Published in Prris d
devoted to nothing out the art Of ''stamp
collecting.n There ara quite number Of
daily and weekly journals in this country de.
voted mainly to the same thing; but some OF
them lose more ''stampsr than they collect
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

Jud La!agan: As scarce as virtue is,
yet elisvs that the supply exceeds the do
mard
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24

A church paper makes the positive asser-
ton In regard to Christian workers, that In
most churches ~about nins-tenths o. ne
work Is done By les than one-tsnth of ths
membcrS
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
HENRY CLAY.

Looking at the signature, III. Clay," all
punched together in q corner, and in which
the II looks more like w than anything
else, one would hardly take it for name
foremost in the annals Of American states
manship and eloquence.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
A Dynamite story.

.Talk about dynamite, can tell you trus
story of what nitro-glycerine once did In our
state. Il was out near Prairie du Chen,
where they were blasting on the Chicago,
Milwaukee and st. Panlroad. The contractor
had several kegs Of the stuff in an under
ground place One day workman left the
place opeE; by-and-by hog came along,
found a keg open, and as glycerine is
as sweet almost rs honey, the animal filed
himself. He came out by-and-by, and soon
wandered into stable which contained
about 40 horses belonging to the contractor.
The hog got fooling around the horses hind
legs. when one Of them drew of and gave
Mr.. Hog good one The conclusion started
the business, and not vestige was ever dis
covered OF the hog or Of . single norse or the
stable. And where the stable once stood
there was q hole In the earth 50 feet deep
and 200 feet in circumference. Fact, gentle
vv1ou ~
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
RATES OF ADVERTISING.

Regular advertising payable quarterly, az due.
crltr,icut advertising payable in advance.
-u,rial Notices are 80 per cent sore Ii mn reg.
5nr advertisements.
Local advertising Is cents Cor the first insertion
y cents per line for each succeeding insertion;
.nry counted In Nonpariel measure.
lob Work payable on delivery.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1885-04-24
THOMAS A. HENDRICKS.

How About Coming Down.
Louisville Courier-J ournal1
Most psople 60 upstairs in heatheni b
fashion, striking their soles against the steps
as harsaly as possible, wearing out their
leather prematurely and making Disagree
able noise. Some run up, taking two steps
at time, and others always fall two OF
three times. Going upstairs should b ons
Of the sIowest and most deliberate acts OF .
mans life.
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
She Threw Vitriol in His Face.

Joseph Schneider lies in a critical
condition at his home, No. 6A3 Forty
third street Chicago, Ill. His eyes,
mouth and breast are horribly burned
with vitriol and the attending physi-
clan says there is some doubt Of his re-
covery, and that, in any event, he will
loose his sight. Some time ago Schneid-
er borrowed, it is said, $1,000 from a
Mrs. Stadeiman lie failed to pay it,
and she sued him and obtained judg-
ment for $500 This was not paid until
about two weeks ago, when Schneider
got married. Before the marriage he
is said to have compromised the matter
with Mrs. Stadelman by paying her $50.
Last night he accidently met Mrs.
Stadelman at the corner Of State and
Thirty-second streets. They had some
words when the woman dashed the en-
tire contents Of a large bottle of yitriol
into his face. He was removed to a
5neighboring drug store, where it was
found that the liquid had filled his eyes
and mouth, causing his tongue to swell
so that he could scarcely speak, and had
then trinkled down the upper portion
Of his body. His coat, vest and shirt
were almost consumed by the acid. The
woman escaped and will probably not be
arrested as Schneider requested that she
should not be arrested.
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
Sunhowers for Fuel.
dakota Farner.l

A correspondent after having tried
turf coal, wood and sundowers has set-
tied upon the last named as the cheapest
and best fuel for trseless Dakota He says:
II grow Que acre Of them every year, aud
nave plenty of fuel for one stove the whole
year round and use some in the other stove
besides. | plant them in hills the same as
corn only three seeds to the billy, and culti-
vate the same as corn. l cut them when
sto leader or top flower is ripe, let them lay
en- the ground two or three days In that
lime l cut of all the seed heads, which are
put in to an open she'd with floor in it, the
same as a corn-crib. TIE stalks are then
hauled home and packed in common shed
Aith good roof on it.
"When cut in the right time the stalks,
when dry. are hard as oak, and mako good
Not fire while the saed-h heads, with the seed
Ia, make better fire than rhe best hard
coal. The seed being very rich in oil, will
turn better and longer, bushel for bushel,
than hard coal The sunaower is very hard
on land. The piece Of ground selected to
plant on should be highly enriched with
mannres, In the great steppes tprairie,
region In the interior OF Russia and in Tar.
tary, where the winters are more severe
than here in Dakota, the sunhowers are, and
have been for centuries past tho only kind
OF fasl usejs
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
Jim Farley and the Bulldog.

Years ago, long before Jim Farley
was United States Senator, there was
cranky old colored barber who had a
beautiful young octoroon wife who
wanted to get divorce from him, as
he was jealous and rough in his treat
ment. She sent for Farley to call at
her house early one evening to ask
him to conduct the business, being her
self afraid to seek the lawyers Office
in the daytime for fear the husband
would hear of, divine the intended It'll
cation and beat her. Well, you see,
Jim was only young lawyer, and
anxious for the case. He called, and
had hardly entered the house when the
old fellow was heard approaching To
stay was to involve his client in trouble,
80 the young lawyer skipped across the
yard and scaled a fence. He was pur-
sued by a big bulldog that succeeded IN
capturing and retaining a portion OF his
coat tail. The future Senator took the
alley route to clothing store, and was
soon wearing new garment. The next
morning he dropped into the barber
shop, his usual shaving place. The old.
fellow apparently killed time while
shaving another man, so that other GUS
toners might take other chairs, and
Farley fall to his lot. The lawyer no.
ticed this, and was q little nervous, but
did not dare retreat. No sooner was
he seated than he saw the fragment OF
the injured coat pinned upon the wall
opposite the chair. Involuntarily his
face flushed, and then blanched as the
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
FURNISHING POLYGIMIsTs.
A l3-Year-Old Child Testifes Against
Her Father.

At Salt Lake City, Utah, a few days
ago, John 2. Ball was arrested for I'M
lawful Capitalization. On his examina-
ton before the United States Commits
sioner, Isabella Ball, a 13-year-old
daughter of the second wife, testified
to her mother (who could not be pro-
cured as a witness living in the same
house with Balls first wife, both hay-
ing children by him. Isaac and James
Birkenhold swore to the same, and the
accused was bound over in ST. 600 for
the Grand jury
Henry Grow and w. Keddington
were arraigned in the Third District
Court Saturday for unlawful cohab-
itation. Both pleaded not guilty, but
Keddington is said to be willing to
weaken and obey the law if the
Church authorities and his wives will
let him.
Herbert J. Foulger was also arraigned
on the same charge, and after pleading
guilty with triumphant air was about
to sit down, when the clerk told him to
wait little, then read another indiet-
ment for the offense covering differ
ent time, to which Foulger, in dazed
way, pleaded not guilty, and sank into
his seat, but he was called up promptly
to hear yet a third indictment, pinning
him for the same offense more recently
thai, either of the others, to which he
also pleaded not guilty.
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
A Red Lantern Story.
fCincinnasi Times-ster.1


aHave you ever noticed" said an old time
Cincinnatian the other morning, that when
signal lanterns are hung on distractions in
the street, that they are Of ordinary glass
wrapped round with thin red fannell You'd
think that they would use lanterns with rcd
glass2"
give noticed them many times, but have
never thought any thing about the matter"
replied the reporter.
aThers is rather peculiar story con.
nected with that, replied the other. Some
years ago an ordinance was rushed through
council, which required red lanterns to be
displayed on street distractions. The con.
tractors somehow or other learned hat the
measure was proposed and eng eered by
man who had laid in a large ock OF red
lanterns and they rose up in their might
and refused to purchase them. They found
that they could manufacture excellent red
light by simply wrapping red flannel round
ordinary lanterns, and finally they grew SO
accu toned to that way Of doing that they
never think Of changing"
1And didn't the schemer who got the
measure through the council profit by itp
@Not bit of it he had the whole stock
of red lanterns left on his hands / guess
he thinks that there is such q thing as being
zoo smart
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
The story Of her troubles during the
ware ra1atpf1 az follows.

The story Of her troubles during the
passage we're related as follows:
Michael Smythe a young Irishman,
twenty seven years Of age, and hailing
from county Kildare, had for some
time been engaged to her daughter.
"a short time ago the three people
agreed to emigrate to this country, the
young couple to be married on their ar
rival here. Three days before sailing
Smythe visited a race course and won
thirty two shillings. With this money
he entered on debauch, and remained
in state Of intoxication until he sailed.
I He brought supply of liquor on
board, and for the first day or two of
the voyage he continued to drink heay-
lily. The liquor turned his brain and he
raved constantly, saying the sailors
had threatened to throw him overheard.
One night when all was still he cllmb-
ed from his bunk, and seeking Mrs.
Hanley, implored her to save him from
some impending peril. The poor wom-
an appealed to the surgeon, who at once
placed Smythe in the hvspital. Mrs.
Hanley insisted on going there, too, to
nurse him.
On Monday night the patient, in a
paroxysm of delrium, drew a pocket
knife from his clothes, and grasping
Mrs. Hanley by the neck inflicted sew
eral severe wounds on her throat. AT
last she succeeded in escaping. Assis
tance was summoned, the raving man
was pinioned, and after an opiate had
been given him he grew quieter. The
Woman's wounds, although severe, were
not dangerous, and after few days OF
nursing she recovered sufficiently to go
about.
The man, however, grew rapidly
worse. He lay in a state of coma for
many hours and at last on the third day
died and was buried at sea.
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
ADV AN CE IN PASSAGE.

The price Of emigrant passage ticket
during the year has been very cheap
About $25 from Ireland tOSt. Paul, and
even as low as $2S by some lines; but
now adyices come from New York that
the railroad companies intend TO adj
yahce their European fare from New
ork to st. Paul to the former prices
$22. This will make the through rate
We advise all who may wish to send
out a passage to a friend to take advan-
tage of the present low rates, and send
$12 by calling Immediately, and secure i
the passage before the advance takes
place. We are always willing and
anxious to save money for our custom
ers, and give this timely warning in re-
gard to passage tickets. We issue
drafts for Ell and upward, PAYABLE
everywhere in Ireland.
"A. e. JOHNSON & Co.,
Emigration Agents.
Corner Third and Sibley streets.
The Northwestern standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1885-1886, 1885-11-14
THE NORTHWESTERN sTANDAR SATURDAY. NOVEMBER TN 1885
Ia darky leered at him and said:

Old darky leered at him and said:
OATS berry bad dog down at my
house, Massa Jim. I guess you done
fin it out, however. We all knoWed it
Wuz you who wuz a-gwine fru de alley
jes as soon as dat dog fetched in dot
piece Of coat tail. An so / thought
I'd fotch it up so you kin have de coat
mended.''
The embryo Senator wouldn't have
given much then for his life, with that
queer black face before him, an uplifted
razor near and a sense Of helplessness
upon him. But he dexterously leaped
from the chair and fed, coatless, hat
less and soapy, believing he had had a
narrow escape, in comparison with
which danger from bulldog was as
nothing Sacramento Bee.