Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1885-05-15
A SINGULAR FUNERAL,
As Described By One Of the
Walters" at the Festival.

As Described By One OF the
Walters" at the Festival.
II wish some one would come here
and discover us, and then a set of peo-
pie arrive and settle, SO that thus we
might gradually become civilized and
at last enlightened. Have you any
idea that it is known in what inky dark
ness we sit? And yet I don't suppose
there is a person in town who can not
read and write. Idon't mean that he
can spell or put a grammatical SEN
:ence together. That power is not
necessary, even to be graduated from
the Center High School. And what do
YOU imagine will be required Of us at
that funeral this afternoon? We shall
not please them. l know, and yet 1 am
going TO try with all my might to do
what they expect" Thus wrote my
sister Gertrude on q certain day last
hummer.
The town of Ransome, which you
will not find on any map, is removed
from the seashore. 1t is in Massachu-
sets. 1t is lovely of aspect, with hills
and brooks and rocky pastures, and
distant purple mountains. But it is of
its people more than Of its scenery that
lam going to speak.
1t Is almost a miracle how such
places a still exist in Massachusetts;
hamlets not half q dozen miles away
Srom towns where live ladies and gem
slemen who can use a singular verb
with a singular subject, and who know
what plural means. A great deal
hangs on knowledge seemingly so sim
pie. Here in this part Of Ransome we
are scorned if we say Chow are you?"
instead of '.How be YEP" Such is the
natural proneness to %depravity that l
have basely truckled to popular opinion
and flung about the wrong verbs reck-
lessly. / don't think / am liked any
the better for it, and I imagine I am
still called ''stuck up"
They will not read here, and you are
"a ''lazy, shitless thing if you read.
81 amt no time for readin'," a man
will say scornfully; and you shall
see him sitting for hours in a numb
sort Of way, perhaps smoking, perhaps
not v doing so much as that. He
will tell you he is resting, and he would
sincerely believe himself an object for
blame if he should be scanning a news
paper or a book.
You say this state of affairs can not
be in Massachusetts. But it is, and
though we have lived in the midst of it
Tor six years, it even now seems incred-
ible to us. What impossible, though
rrx;e;b1o lo,,;o, Sc +bo,o ,,b;ol,
vents glimmers of and refinement
md literary tastes from coming here,
when a few miles away you shall find
culture and geniality? True, there is no
railway to the village, but a railway is
not solely a civillzer. Idefy any one
to teach these people anything. They
may listen, or appear to listen, to some
one announcing a self-evident fact, not
known to them, and youwill see all the
time on their faces a look of dull scorn
nj you who should believe such a thing.
He who would convince the worthy
Mr.. Dunderhead of any truth which
Dunderhead does not see, must be a
master of his art.n
But | was going to tell you about that
funeral. A man living near us had
died after q long and painful illness;
my sister and l called to ask the family
If we could assist them in any way. We
met several women with lugubrious
faces who had been in to see the corpse.
We were invited in for that purpose,
aud as a great treat, but declined.
''Can we be of any use?" we asked.
"Wall," with the conventional Yam
kee nasal, which, if you ever thought
of it, is that one does not talk through
the nose, but without the assistance of
that organ: "Wal], you couldn't no.
how be walters to the funeral, now
could YEP" inquired the widow.
We protested u willingness could
We know what was the duty Of walters.
''Wall, you see, when we've all gone
to the grave, the walters they git up a
supper; coffee, tea, and so on. There'l
be a sight O. folks most likely come
back from the grave, and they'll be
mighty hungry. You'll have to tend
right up to 'em, we know. There'n be
several tables full, and dishes to wash.
Now, could We, now? I'll be so much
obleeged to ye. But" she added in
thoughtful commiseration of us, '.if ye
do, you can't 60 to the grave"
We said we would stay and would
cry to do what was proper.
How appetizing going to the grave
must be-" said Gertrude, as we walked
home.
On the way we met Nancy Holland,
who was taking down a stranger from
Mill Village. She explained that her
companion had never seen Mr.. Ewell.
the man, but that she felt a wish to see
abe corpse. Mrs. Holland was old, and
trembling with the interest and excite
ment of the occasion. She asked if we
were to be present 'to the tuneril."
When told thatwe were to be "waiters,"
she looked at uswith unmistakable sur
prise and envy.
BE We, nowP Ideclare 1 told Miss
Ewell I'd jest as lieve stay an help,
only I can't leave Robert, ye know"
and she went on.
From interviews with several other
neighbors we saw that our Office was a
coveted ne. Did it not give an almost