Madison times., 1885-09-05
SHOOTS BUFFALO.
A sample Texas Ysrn--Sons OF Apsnias
on Their Mettle.

stimulating effect on the IMAGINATION.
There is more unostentatious lying
done by old men who sit around in
hide bottom chairs, in the shade in
front of Texas livery stables, chewing
tobacco and whiting sticks, than i'll
all the Court houses in the country.
On this occasion there was several old
frosty-faced veterans OF pre-adamic
Texas, swapping yarns about killing
Mexicans and Indians, and hunting
buffalos and mustangs. They seemed
to lie without the slightest effort.
Mendacity seemed to roll out Of their
mouth by the mile. Ialso noticed that
when any of them told particularly
tough lie, the others seemed panied,
and Immediately one ofthem would get
off a much tougher yarn.
| One of them was a white bearded old
son of Ananias by the name OF Demp-
sew. He was a stage driver by profess
sion. There was another old fellow
with brindle hair and long red nose
named Smoot. These two seemed to
be rivals in the business ofmanufactur-
ing frontier improbabilities.
Ever been out on the headwaters oi
the Nueces?" asked Smoot.
"a thousand times, i reckon. kill
ed and skelped a Krankaway mjur
right at the waterhole i'll 1887. He
was a trihe over eight feet high. His
skelp was as big as door mat, said
Dempsey, carelessly.
"If he was q Karankaway, he must
have only been boy. All the karan
kaway bucks / ever shot averaged
about nine feet. Well, as was goln,
to say, had narrer escape from 4
buffalo out thar in 1881. Ireckon thai
was million OF 'em out thar"
There was more than that when
was out thar" said Dempsey, pickin
up a stick to whittle.
"As was saying, Just for the fun o
it thought would shoot off buffa
los tail lust two inches from his body
He was a cavortln around, am
switchin' his tail about, so l didn'
make much of a shot. l shot 1t o.
two and a half from his body"
Dempsey yawned like a cavern an
replied.
You must have been mighty awl
ard with a shootin' iron to miss a
easy shot like that. When Twas a raT
GER with Jack Hayes, fused to foller u
Il buffaler and shoot the cow ticks o
{ OF him without techin' him"
: Il had fever and ager when / she
| that buffaler bulls tail off, exclaime
Dempsey, ''and had Just taken abor
1 hall a pound OF quinme, and my hand
l war leetle shaky. AS soon as she
D off that bulls tail, he turned and can
Y at me in a hurry so ] made for I'll
nearest tree"
/. sI have had the same thing happe
; to me a billion times, reckon. III
!. buffaler caught you on his horns, al
n chucked YOU up in the tree, didn' hel
n interrupted Dempsey, who was anxlol
c to head off the impending lie, whiC
e threatened to be whopper.
J. "Ive had 'em do that to me, too
n resumed Dempsey, "but this one drt
Is his horns siz inches into the tree {
t. both sides of me, and he couldn't 2
l. them out again. Thar Twas pinned
'f the tree, and so was the butfaler.
II warn't hurt a bit, and the buffal
: couldn't get away"
ii Old Dempsey was silent a few mi
le utes, during which pause he expe'
h Grated copiously, and it was evide
a that his brain was at work with t
2 energy of a clothes wringer. There W
a vigor and freshness about Smoo
m lie that almost maddened him WI
e jealousy.
ne 'Them sort ofthings happened me
Is every day when me and Jack Hay
IN was i'm the range business"
1t 81 was right slim and thin i'll th'
ne davs." resumed Smoot, land | Srt
l. uaily worked my way down from
lis tween them horns OF the dilemma,
to speak. ] patted the butfaler
the head, and taxed soft to HIM, a
got him so gentle, that II he had bt
a COW / could have milked him.
p- last got out, but it was blank tt!
Ie squeeze. / walked off and LETT J
tn thar. fast to the tree by his horns.
"That buffaleF must have b
re- mighty long horns" sncered Demp
II never seen q buffaler with horn
TO foot long. SmoOt, YOU are an
ct man and purity soon you will have
meet your maker. You. should
u. tell lies"
e.l II never told q lie in my J
he Dempsy. That was the only i
I'd. horned buffaler ! ever saw, an
Of reckon I've killed a billion or sc
buffalers. Thar was at least eight
he ten inches of his horn druv IN ter t
ch tree, and thar was about a foot or
all of horn outside of the tree, whe
i've walked of and left him anchored fa'
OF sis that stump tailed buffaler STA
ing thar yit?" asked Dempsy, "
.ed evident chagrin at the stupendousl
nt of this lie.
"a. II reckon thecoyotes eat him up
the excepting the horns, for they are t
ess Wit. I saw them last year when
up thar, but the tree had growed SO
and them horns were fast in a hm'
i've the tree more'u so feet nom the gro
maybe it was only SO feet. I c;
the afford to lie, for, as you know, In
old man.-Texas Siftings.
bis The steamer Etruria, which arr
in New York recently, is said
fnn - E mi