The Osceola times., 1885-04-04
MY FIRST MURDER
Reasons for Committing It, and
Why 1t Shall Be My Last.


what lot the fellows who write hooks
and things have to answer for. For in
stance, am pretty sure that l should
never have thought of committing mur-
der but for particular article in the
CornhiH Magazine. don't often read
magazine articles, but this ono was
brought to my notice in rather cxcep-
tional way. 1 had occasion to pay a
visit to my dentist, and on being shown
into his waiting-room observed at once
that there was an addition 10 the cur
rent literature upon the table. l had
been there (from circumstances over
which have unfortunately no controD
SO frequently that knew the list by
heart. l had tried them all, at various
times, and had found them, without ex-
cepton, vanity. Under such circum-
stances, 1t may be imagined that /
caught sight of the familiar yellow cover
of the CornhiH with much satisfaction.
found, to my surprise, that it was
quite recent number, bearing date Sep
tember last. / pounced upon it, and
was soon deep in a highly interesting
story, entitled, THE Curate of Churn-
side" 1t set forth how nice young
curate, by name Walter Dene. Of
charming manners and artistic tastes
a man who showed the tenderest
solicitude for little sick girls, and.
touching consideration even for their
aua.t It,,. hary i,.,,.al1al hx,
pressure of circumstances, to murder
his uncle. / had always had
prejudice against murderers. whom /
pictured to myself as vulgar and brutal
persons like the late Mr.. Peace, but
began to see that there might be another
side to the question. The story showed,
in the clearest and most unmistakable
manner, that Walter Dene really had
no alternative. He had not tho least
wish to murder his uncle, but the old
gentleman formed an obstacle to Wal
ter's union with an amiabe and deserv-
Ing young lady, and it was absolutely
necessary that he should be removed.
Accordingly. Walter makes up his mind
to remove him. and does so, stabbing
him artistically in the back with
bowie-knife. 1t shows the natural
kind-heartedness of the man. that hav-
ing, in Withdrawing the knife, acci-
dentally wounded the paw of the muir
dered mans favorite spaniel, Walter
Dene sits down quietly by the side of
the corpse, and binds up the dogs
wounded limb with his own pocket
handkerchief. had reached this point
the xuban fha f.,IAtnpr- daarr
opened. My dentist appeared in the
opening, with his usual crocodile smile
Il never could realize crocodles' tears,
but ! can picture their smile exactly,
and beckoncd me in. l Rad to lay
down the story unfinished. and to this
day don't know what ultimately be-
came of the tender-hearted murderer.
For the next half hour or so my atten-
Ton was diverted from the subject by
extreme personal discomfort, but on
leaving the chamber of horrors and re-
gaming the street the history came back
to me with renewed vividness. found
myself examining Walter Dene's argu-
ments for the suppression of his uncle
with a sort of personal interest. For |,
100, have an uncle. |. too, love (and
am beloved by) charming girl, and
my uncle is the only obstacle to our
union. l don't mean to say that he OBJ
lects to it-quite the contrary; but the
mere fact of his continuing to exist,
anu thereby retaining possession of his
money, which would otherwise come to
me- is an cllectual bar to our happiness.
Dear Julia is charming girl, but, like
,he young lady in the song, her face is
her fortune, and it is hardly to be sup
posed that !, BENJAMIN Grylls, a clerk
IN her Majesty's Civil Service at fl50
a,,year, could marry on that, even with
the additional hundred or so my uncle
allows me. Really the parallel was
wonderfully close. In some respects,
indeed, mine was the strongest case.
for Kew. Walter Dene's uncle was not
lsavc by the mere fact of his existence)
objectionable. Mine pas! Not to men,
n ,,on his disgusting habit of calling me
benny, and of cracking what he was
pleased to consider jokes at my expense,
ne had sundry manners and customs
which, to delicate minded person,
were extremely offensive. He woud
wear wear an old serge jacket and carpet
snppers, and not unfrequently he would
come down to breakfast without collar
OF neektic, and not always in the clean
est OF shirts. Now if there is one thing
more than another ON which l pride
Imyseif, it is my shirts. l always wear
S:,nle SSuncle Thomas pays the laundress'
MI Q clean shirt everv dav and INV