The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1885-08-23
COURTESIES AND DISCOURTESIES.
Some Suggestions as to the Ordinary Polite
neSSes of Life.

Some Suggestions as to the Ordinary Polite
nesses of Life.
Csssell for September.
There many conrteSles which gentleman
should render to lady, the absence of which is
at once felt, and causes people involuptarily to
remark inwardly to themselves, if not aloud to
their friends, THAT man has not good manners"
[ passed that Judgment the other evening when
| was sitting with a friend by her treside. A
gentleman was ushered in who we'll known
to my friend, but comparative stranger to me.
He shook hands with her first, which was, of
course. the right thing to do, and then, while
speaking to her he shook hands with me- Ths
breaker of this law of courtesy was a young
professional man. we'll endowed with this
worlds goods. | should not record this little
rudeness if it was only of rare occurrence, but
often notice people guilty Of this discourtesy-
namely, that of shaking hands with person
while they are speaking to another person. If
you wish to say more than How do you dol" to
your hostess, or to any one else whom you greet
at first, 1t is lees dlscOurteouS to continue your
| conversation with her for few moments before
taking notice of any one near her, than it is to
stretch out your hand and shake that of her
neighbor while your face is turned away and
your lips addressing another.
The dscourteous young man to whom | have
alluded gave me another reason for my verdict,
and as iIf this respect also he is by no means the
only offender in general society, shall mention
the little ruderess There are three, i not
more, separate syllableS and sounds which some
people utter or make when they have not card
what has been said to them, when they wish
to express assent These are--What9 Eth? Uh!
and gutteral sound of the letter m, which can
not be expressed in writing, 81 beg your
pardon or What did you say?" are sentences
which should certainly be said when a repetition
is asked for; and Yes" should not be replaced
by grunt when an assent Is given.
There are numerous little acts which man of
courtesy will perform. While he is calling at q
house, he will rise and open the door for any
lady who leaves the room. even if she is an en-
tire stranger to him. in his own house he will
not only open the door of the room, but
accompany the lady to the hall door, and
open that, If there is no servant at hand to do
so, for departing guest whether lady or
gentleman should not be left to find their way
alone, Neither should they be allowed to find
their way into a room. When you act as a
host, and your guests accompany you into the
drawlng-r room, do not you my dear sir, follow
the practice Of some forgetful or neglectful men,
who walk in and march straight up the room,
leaving their one guest, or train, as the case
! may be- to follow and to close the door. A host
should open the door, and shut it after his guests
have entered the room.
Among other small courteses. gentleman
will rise from his chair, however luxuriouslv
comfortable, and offer assistance, if need be- to
a lady if she goes to put Goals on the fire, or if
she tries to open close window. When he
escorts her into a room. he will see that she is
seated before he looks for chair for himself:
when he escorts her to a table, he will wait to
| arrange for her comfort, hold the chair, or push
it backwards or forwards, as required before he
takes his own seat. And during the meal he
will see that she is provided with all she is likely
to want. The lady ought not to be obliged to
ask for salt, for water, for another cup of tea
or, in fact for anything that is on the table.
BROKEN lines of ba;o