davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
The Central American Row.

The United States Government is
forced by circumstances to interfere in
the affairs of the Central American re-
publics. The republic of Guatemala
threatens an invasion of the neighbour
ing republics of Nicaragua, Costa Rica
and San Salvador with view to subiu-
eating them and consolidating the Cen
trail American republics into one Gov
: eminent with President BarrioS as dicta-
tor. The United States controls vast
trade across the isthmus, and there is
now pending between the country and
Nicaragua treaty providing for the
construction of an inter-oceanic canal
through that state. Both interest and
duty demand that the Government as
sist in the preservation of all the Central
American republics, aud prevent their
overthrow by foreign powers or by do
nestle tyrants.
There may be some of both 10 this af-
fair. DE Lesseps would be only too
clad TO see Barrios' scheme carried out.
rs il would defeat the canal treaty with
Nicaragua. Indeed it is strongly init
mated that his ''ine Italian hand has
played this for trump card. France
has millions invested in the Par INA
canal and would not look with disfavor
on any scheme that would defeat the
proposed rival Barrios, however, is
an old hand at the business, and per-
haps did not need the assurance of the
moral support of France to induce him
to usurp the supreme military authority
over tie Central American states. He
has been working in this direction for
the past twenty years and has always
been embroiled with some power or
other, but he has never before made so
bold move. This time he has walked
up the wrong passenger. and unless he
comes to his senses he may soon wish
he had remained contented TO be presi-
dent of Guatemala,
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
The Highland Feather.


Highland regiments are at last easy
in their minds. The feather bonnet.
for the present at any rate, is to be
retained. Col. Stockwell, commanding
the Seaforth Highlanders. has received
an official intimation that the feather
bonnet will this year be given to his
battalion. There is a great deal no
doubt in esprit dc corps. But it is a
little hard to understand why High
landers should consider it a part of
their national cult to wear bonnet of
ostrich feathers. The ostrich is not in
digenous to Scotland, and its plumes
were certainly not carried in their bon
nets by the Scots who bled with Wal
lace and were led by Bruce. But there
is no accounting for these quasi-herald-
ic fancies. There is not an Irishman-
not single Mulligan or O'Donoran-
in the whole of the Scots guards who
would not become periodically indig-
nant if the red and white checked tar
tan were taken from his forage cap.
And, after all. there is a good deal OF
human nature in these fancies and
whims. Uniformity of uniform is use
full enough in actual warfare; but
every regiment likes ii own distinctive
badges upon parade. Isl. Jamess Ga
zests.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
Buggy-Riding Made Easy.

a Wiiliamsport z Mus claims to
have invented a buggy that, like the
boys whistle, goes itself that is, it
doesn't require d horse 10 make it 90.
II Is furnished with two upright levers
~ iront OF the scat. BIZ means Of which
the rider can propel 1t with great ease
SIX or seven miles an hour. If he has q
feminine partner. lie can use one lever
and she the other II The weather and
scenery are delightful, the riders can
be as deliberate as they please: They
can stop to rest, ii they want to; under
big shade tree Without being COM
PEELED 70 pull at the bit Of an
impatient horse, or make Them
selves hoarse shouting whoa to
him. The new buggy won't scare
or run away, wrecking iisclf and
running Inc feathers and iincry Of its
fair oecupafit. And there is no horsb
with eyes 20 see and give away any
trif1ing inproprietics that may Be in
dnlged in. As to cheapness, the new
buggy. doesn't eat, doesn't have to
be rubbed down four times day,
doesn't want Il new set of blankets
every fall. and q new harness and whip
once year. In short, the cost of the
buggy, which is about that of modern
bicycle, is all the outlay required.
1t is evident from this description
that the Williamsport invention fills a
long-felt want. When the new buggy
has become popularized everybody
Will Eide, of course, and livery-stable-
Keepers with their vexatious bills will
go out of fashion. Romeo and Juliet,
as they take their daily drive in the
park, each working a lever of the new
vehicle will be taking practical les
sons n the art of working in matrimo-
NAL harness. If any would-be Juliet
should prove too lazy to work her
lever, Romeo would understand at
once that lie had better be looking for
new Juliet with q more industrious
turn of mind. The ordinary riders will
ride for pleasure and 20 Dis slow or as
fast as their muscles and surplus ener-
gy dictate, Instead of feeling compelled,
rs now, to drive like Jehu in order to
get their moneys worth out of a hired
horse or team.
The only drawback TO this delightful
| picture OF a pos iblc era in which
everybody can take buggy-rides to his
| hearts content, is the fact that the in
Nentor has only perfected one of these
self-acting buggies and charges an adj
mission OF % cents to all who want to
see it, lhitadelf,hia Times.
Il
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
A Tale Of Two Dogs.

r.
A friend of the Record has very
original dog. He came to the family a
little, scrawny, NANCY, timid yaller
dog. He is now large, fat, we'll con-
ditioned, consequential yaller dog.
There is a beer shop about two blocks
from the residence which this dog
adopted for his own. and Buff goes
there occasionally and drinks the drip
pings that fall from the faucet of the
beer key into q tub kept for the pur-
pose. Sometimes he drinks so much
of this fascinating liquid that he be-
comes very drunk and goes home in a
sad state. When, at dinner time, a
long, deep, stcnterous grunt is heard
from underneath the table at the back
of the room and visitor gives look
of surprise the explanation is, ooh,
Buff is drunk again. 7
Next door lives handsome setter
named Captain. Buff had always
whipped him in their chance hostile
encounters until Captain learned to
give him wide berth. But one day
Captain happened to see Buff going
home from the beer shop in shocking
state of inebriety. He knew that the
moment for his revenge had come. and
rushed upon the incapable Buff like a
wolf on lamb. Buff made an exceed
ingly unsteady and inadequate defense.
The tyrant of the neighborhood was as
eifectually disarmed as Sullivan was
disarmed before Mitchell. He went
home dreadfully whipped and with
such a sense of humiliation that he has
quite let off going to the beer shop
until the next time-and has not since
molested Captain.
The best thing about this story is
that it is absolutely true. Boston Ecen-
ing Record
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

In remcmbrances of George Eliot re.
Gently published it is stated that at one
time she was much interested in phre-
nology, and had cast of her head
taken. Her head was very large one,
twenty-five and onc-quartcr inches
round. The temperament was nervous
lymphatic that is, active without en-
durance and her working hours were
never more than from a. M. TO y.
~. In her brain development the in
tcllect greatly predominated. In the
feelings the animal and moral regions
were about equal The social feelings
were very active, particularly the adj
hesiveness. She was of most aifcc-
tionate disposition, always requiring
some one to lean t.pon. She saw all
sides intellectually.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
The Good Old Days"

II guess these farmers who are groan-
ing about low prices and high taxes,
and who are longing for the good old
times, don't remember much about
the good old times, said well-known
Orange county farmer of Goshen, N. Y.
81 can remember when we used to
haul our grain, butter, pork, and eggs
all the way to Newburgh, going one
day and coming back the next. We
generally got ID cents bushel for oats,
and 10 cents u pound for butter Sew
enty-fiye cents bushel for wheat was
a fancy price. If we got 6 or 8 cents
a dozen for eggs we thought we were
doing well. Nice corn-fed pork. dress
ed, we carted to market for 50 hum
dred. The butter we put on the mar
ket in those days was the genuine Or
ange county article, yellow as gold and
as hard as a walnut. | have sold tub
full after tubfull of butter for 10 cents a
pound that would net me rs cents easy,
if | had it, or any like it, to sell now.
That was before the Erie railway came
through here and put us up to selling
our milk instead of making it into but
ter. We didn't have any lime kept
eggs to sell in those days, either As
for taxes paid 800 for my farm of
one hundred acres when was getting
10 cents a pound for butter. On the
same farm now ! pay $40. 80. and Ihave
sold my entire dairy of milk for what is
equal to more than three times 10 cents
a pound for butter. There is good
deal of humbug in this mourning after
the good old days, and know it.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
Royal Life.


A suggestive little story concerning
the Duchess of Edinburg has found its
way into print through a Leeds journal.
The Duke took occasion not long ago
to reason with her upon the peculiari-
ties of manner and general carriage
which prevent her from being popular
like her sister-in-law, the Princess of
Wales. A royal row ensued, but
wound up with the announced resolve
of the daughter of the late Gar to
model her compartment in future after
that of the Danish Princess. 1T hap
pened not long after, says the chron-
icler, .'that the Princess of Wales at
tended charity fair given in aid of an
old woman's home. The amiable Al
exandra. out of the goodness of hei
heart, went around the room speaking
a kind word to each of the unfortunate
women. Now, the Princess of Wales
is slightly lame; and the Duchess Of
Edinburg, who was present and deter
mined to carry out the suggestions of
her lord to the letter, went round the
room behind the Princess and mimick-
ed her lameness and all! As may be
supposed, matters were not at all
mended ~
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

Three performing seals are to be
seen at the Westminster Aquarium in
London. They perform on such music
al instruments as the banjo, guitar,
drum and cymbals; they smoke, and,
in the comic part of their performance,
a blind member plays the part of the
needy knife-grinder, while another,
left to rock a cradle, overturns its baby
charge into the tank. They dive from
heights carrying sticks out of the water
as retriever dogs do, and catch fish and
take them unhurt to their master. And
one of them has been taught to save
life. A man is launched on raft into
the tank, and when the raft capsizes
the seal seizes him by the collar Of his
coat and. swimming on its back, so as
with the lower portion of his body to
keep the mans head above the water,
lows him to shore
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
when ADVERTISING IS Wanted.

An exchange says: There's nothing
on earth so mysteriously funny as a
newspaper advertisement. The prime,
first, last, and all the time object of an
advertisement is to draw custom. 1t is
not. was not, and never win be designed
for any other human purpose. So the
merchant waits till the busy season aud
his store is SO full of customers that he
can't get his hat oft, and then he rushes
to the newspapers and puts in his adj J.
yertisement. When the dull season
gets along, and there Is no trade, and
he wants 10 sell goods SO bad that he
can't pay his rent. he takes ont his adj
vertisement. That is, some of them do.
bnt occasionally leyel-headed mer
chant puts in bigger one aud scoops
all the business, while his neghbors are
making mortgages to pay the gas bill.
There are times when you couldn't stop
people from buying everything III the
store if you planted cannon behind
the door. and that's the time the adyer-
usenent is sent on its holy mission. 1t
makes light work for the advertisement,
for chalk sign on the sidewalk could
do all that was needed and have half a
holiday six days in the week, bnt who
wants to favor an advertisement? They
are built to do hard work, and should
be sent o,it in the dull DAYS when a
customer has to be knocked down with
hard facts and kicked insensible with
bankrupt reductions and prices, before
he will spend cent. That's the aim
and end Of an advertisement, and if you
ever omen store don't try tn 0et than
to come when they are already sticking
out of the windows, but give them your
advertisement right between the eyes in
the dull season, and you will wax rich
and own fast horse, and perhaps be
able TO smoke good cigar once or
twice a week. Write this down where
you'll fall over it every day:--The time
TO draw business is when You want bust
ness, and not when you have more
business than you can attend to already.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
Better Late Than Never,
(Crowded ont last week.l

crowded out last week.
MADISON. March 17.-Last week was
one of considerable excitement in the
legislature. The important questions
of high license, woman suffrage, the
agricultural college, the question of
submitting to the people an amendment
to the state constitution so amending
Sec. 5, Article |, that in civil cases at
law fiye-sixths vote of the jury would
determine the verdict, were all ably dis
cussed.
The bill fer the reconstruction of Sell
ence Hall, machine shop, carpenter
shop, chemical laboratory, and in addi-
ton thereto a gymnasium for the Uni
versity, passed the assembly about three
weeks ago and was referred in the SEN
ate to the committee on claims. When
Senator Kidd, chairman Of that COM
mittee, returned the bill to the senate it
was recommended to strike out that
portion of the bill relating to the chemi-
cal laboratory and gymnasium. The
committee held that, while the faculty
of the University seemed to think these
two buildings very much needed, it was
not good policy to take too great n
burden upon the state at the present
time. A motion was made to refer the
bill to the committee on state affairs,
but the motion was lost Senator Kidd
then made a motion to refer the bilIsto
the committee on education for further
consideration-the motion prevailing
and now the bill is being carefully
weighed by Senator's Parry, Lord and
Jonas. The friends of the University
are active in extolling the merits of the
bill, and auxiously awaiting its reap
pearance in the senate.
In the two houses separately last week
took place the following interesting dis
cucSinno
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
WEDNESDAY.

In the Senate
Senator Jonas supported the bill re-
ferring to the constitutional amendment
| OF Section 5, Article l. He said that
the advanced legal talent of our country
strongly felt and often urged that some
change be made in our jury system. He
said that many cases had been lost and
parties utterly ruined in cases at law
simply because n stubborn juror, or a
bribed one, had been able to hang the
jury and prevent a verdict. He held
that rs the amendment would only per-
tain to civil and never to criminal cases
and as it would first come before the
aeople for their sanction, the senate
ought to pass Che bill and thereby test
the popular strength of the unanimous
jury system. Senator Kennedy flew to
the defense of the jury system, and pre-
dicted the danger OF tampering in any
way with law and custom so faithfully
cherished by the people throughout the
state and Union.
The bill was defeated.
In the assembly:
Mr.. Adams championed the Agricul-
tural College bill. He showed the little
benefit that agricultural students deri. e
at present from the agricultural depart
ment of the University, and compared
the farmers of Europe and America;
said that the main cause for Europe pro-
ducing so much more per acre, on older
land, than America could do on newer
land, was that they had so many more
experimental agricultural schools and
stations than we. Mr.. Norcross replied.
He held that Europe did not educate
her ordinary farmers; that the noble
mems sons and wealthy classes received
| all the benefit of experimental schools
there. He had travelled through
France during harvest and, in a ride
of $50 miles, did not see any reap
ers or self-biuders; their implements
were the old-fashioned sickle; aud held
that Europe was not to be compared to
America in agriculture After a lively
discussion, both morning and evening
session, the bill was defeated. Many Of
the farmers who urged the bill and petit
toned for its passage are indignant at
It's failure, bat the legislature justify
their action on the ground of economy
during the present state of affairs in the
financial world.
A substitute - the Friend High Lii
cense bill was passed by the assembly.
Bill No. 243 A, introduced
by Mr.. Dav and empowering assessors
10 assess all notes, bonds. mortgages,
and papers held as lucrative property.
viii command considerable attention
when brought to hearing.
TUESDAY. MARCH Il.
In the senate:
The Woman's Suffrage bill was killed
by vote of Ii toto.
A bill doubling the number of Blue
books was concurred IN.
In the assembly
Mr.. Days bill. No. 2i3 A. above mem
toned. was called up and killed by large
majority. showing the strength and
sympathy which the money-loaners
/ POSSESS even in q legislature.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
DAUGHTERS. WIVES. MOTHERS

We emphatically guarantee Doctor
Anarchists CATHoLIcoN. a Female REM
edy, to cure Female Diseases, such as
Ovarian troubles, Inflammation and
liberation, Falling and Displacement
|or bearing down feeling. Irregularities,
Barrenness, Change of Life, Leucorh9a,
besides many weaknesses springing from
the above, Ike Headache, Bloating.
Spinal weakness, Sleeplessness, Ner-
vous debility, Palpitaticn of the heart,
sc. For sale by F. ". Bryan, Lancas.
ter. Price S1.00 and s1.50 per bottle
Send to j. B. Marchisi, Utica, N. r.,
for Pamphlet. free. sy1
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

Leading druggists and physicians are
becomming greatly interested in the
German preparation ' on Tagan' Ajax
inc. 1t is claimed that there is nothing
to compare with it for kidney. liver or
heart troubles, sick headache, costiye-
ness. debility, etc. If true, its import
ance to every family cannot be over
estimated, for it means great saving
OF expense, suffering and perhaps life.
Sickness is always of momentous con-
sequence and SO certain is Alaxinc to
cure that laborious effort is being made
to persuade every interested person, first
to try one bottle, which will tell the
story, if it is 20 benefit; if not, the agent
Fred w. Bryan, is instructed to refund
price paid. That these generous terms
should make constant urging unneces-
sary. 10 try remedy of this high order,
must be admitted. DO not buy any
other preparation until you have per-
sondtty used this. 28y1
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

Insanity on the increase. Statistics
show this. Many cases are brought on
by oyerwork, anxiety, excitement. men
tai trouble and nervous prostration; it
is also inherited. Invariably sleepless-
ness and constipation manifest them
selves before one becomes insane. Con-
stipation induces dyspepsia, iaundice,
bad breath, piles, pimples, low spirits.
headache, etc DIR. Jones Red Clover
Tonic relieves constipation. thereby cur
ing these diseases Price, so cents.
4 T. w. BRYAN.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
The new Gilbert and Sullivan opera

The new Gilbert and Sullivan opera
was brought out in London last week,
with evidences of more than success a.
estense such as characterized the pro-
daction of "The Princess The title
is "The Mikado; or, The Town of Titipi, .
the pilot Japanese, and Mr.. aullivan's
music is said to be Surprisingly bright
and enjoyable better than the libretto.
This ballot takes up a royal decree by
the Mikado that all persons who leer,
ilirt, wink, OF ogle, unless married,
shall be beheaded; and much fun is
made out of the central idea by Mr..
Gilbert. The Indepeadent.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

The best on earth, can truly be said
of Griggs Glycerine Salye, which is a
sure, Afe and speedy cure for cuts,
bruises, scalds, burns. wounds and all
other sores. VIII positively cure piles,
letter and all skin eruptions. Try this
wonder healer. Satisfaction guaranteed
or money refunded, Only "a cents.
Sold by + W. Bryan. 34m12
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
A W0NDEREIrI. nISrnrEpv

A WONDERFUL DISCOVERY -
Consumptives and all, who suffer from
any affection Of the Throat and Lungs,
can find a certain cure in DIR. Kings
NewDiscoyery for Consumption Thou
sands of permanent cures verify the
truth of this statement No medicine
can show such a record Of wonderful
cures Thousands of once hopeless suf-
ferers now gratefully proclaim they owe
their lives to this New Discovery. It
will cost you nothing to give it trial.
Free Trial Bottles at Stone & Has
sells drug store. Large size s100.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

The average length Of time is on the
increase. The science Of medicine has
made great ptogress; many diseases are
now controlled that were formerly
thought incurable. The greatest discov-
cry is DR.. Bigelow's Positive Cure.
which cures consumption in stages that
otherremedies are Of no benefit. Coughs,
colds, Group, whooping cough, bronchitis,
and all throat and lung diseases speedily
and safely cured. Price, 80 cents and 81
Trial bottles free 4 F. w. Bryan.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
Special Reading Notices,

/. W. Bryan, Druggist, guarantees
positive relief for any cough, cold, GROUP
or lung complaint by using Acker's Eng
lish Remedy,or will refund the money.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

+. W. Bryan, Druggist, wishes it
known that he guarantees Acker's Dis
pepsia Tablets to be the best remedy for
indigestion ever made, they always re-
heve headache. 3
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

Al offer Of 500 has been refused 10y
a citizen of Thomas County, Georgia,
for maidstone which he found in
Montgomery County while on a visit
there recently. 1t is egg-shaped and
about half the size OF hen's egg.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

Postmaster General Villas files all APP
plications for office and when the appii-
cant s'wants to know why his COM
mission is not forthcoming he is ans
wered truthfully: Your application is
on file.n After that the office-hunter
has to wait, it may be for years and it
may be forever Chicago Herald.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26

Ask Il. w. Bryan, Druggist, about
Acker's Blood Elixir, the only prepar-
alton guaranteed to cleanse the blood
and remove all chronic diseases. 2
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1885-03-26
A Ter bi weapoa Of Defense.

II Z pQalpous wiseacre tries to sit
down Oh you, ask him rapidly few
questions ike the following:
What. if any. il the difference be-
tween kaiak and caique?
What, il any, is the difference be-
tween Jacobins and Jacobitesp
What, if any, is the difference be-
tween the ear Of Dionysus and the ear
of Dionysius?
How do you accent vagary. coterie,
and survey?
How do you pronounce pronouncia-
ton?
What IS the meaning of the phrase
TO "bum your chuck2N
These questions viii make it pleas
ant for him. Slcintoas Iaper.