The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1885-10-31
ALLEGED UET.

| tHiSn seat over W nat 90 you
want the seat turned for?" Got
carried by my station. Want t git
back. Chicago News
"A LIE grows as it travels, I" says ar
adage. Exception should be made in
the case OF the fsherman's lie, which
Is usually so large that it can't travel.
Harrington Free Press
A WOMAN asks: "Why does the av-
erage girl always stultify herself by
marrying some fool OF man? ?" Nav
it not he because that is the only kind
in the market ?-Binghampton ReDub-
| Hcan.
\ PESNsYIvANIA man claims to have
| seen a white rattlesnake The only
way we can account for the phenome-
non is to suppose that he had been
drinking milk punch.-BHrhngton Free
! Press.
| PROFESSOR, looking at his watch
As we have n few minutes, | shall be
glad to answer any question that any
| one may wish to ask Student
"What time is IT, please ?"-London
Penny Pictorial
/ A CLERGYMAN at Mount Desert is
| said to haveIecentIy closed his prayer
/ by saying: 90 Lord, now that our
summer visitors have departed, wilt
thou take their place in our hearts
! New Orleans PicayUne
THE brewer who maketh good beer
in the day and putteth a good head
! on it Is better than he who drinketh
/ the beer at night and waketh up in
the morning with a good head on him.
Salf NfltErgy3 lTavrayFnE
THE following note from a girls
father is attached to the marriage Ii
cense record in the county clerk ; Of
flee at Indianola, Ia Mr.. - has
permission to 90 ahead-the girl is not
OF age, but we have cay1d.' Chicago
Times
PHRENOLoGIsT-"Y bump of inn
agination is abnormally large, sir.
, You should write poetry" Citizen
Il do write poetry. Only yesterday |
took a poem to an editor, and that
bump you are feeling is where ne hit
me- Don't bear so hard ~ Courier
Journal
con, George, how superlatively still,
clear and beautiful Is the night !" she
whispered, leaning her fnely-veined
temple against his coat collar; "how
soothing. how restfuln' ''Nes," he re-
piled toying with her chestnut aure2le
hair; ''what night to shoot cats -
Exchange.
OLD Homespun stopped his horse
half an hour before a house with a
smallpox flag huDgout of the chamber
window. Finally he grew impatient,
and with a i" Get up" remarked,
Darn if | b'Geve there's any train
coming. IT any rate I'll risk it,
Boston Transcript
A MAN in a smoking car on a Dan
bury & Norfolk Railway train this
morning leaned over to the man in
front OF him and said, "Have you u
match ?" Yes, but I haven't got any
cigar, was the prompt reply. "Fhen
YOU can't want the match" said the
first man sweetly-DaHbury News.
REBATEMENT: Old lady "a little hard
of hearing;) Eighteen shillings It's
mons-rOus. | know the value ofthese
articles, and neverpaid more than sew
enteen-" Shopman lshoutlng) - said
eight shillings, ma am, not eighteen"
Old lady: "Oh-eght shillings-for
these? | couldn't think OF giving more
than 7s6d. "-Punch.
I'm convarsa+ion had tnrned 10
Niaoara- and one of them observed
YES. if i a wonderful sisht. remen-
her rbe first time T went there Ttwas
some twenty years ago, and the first
evening | was walking" '.You were
walking, were you2" .'Yes; what OF
it ?" ooh, nothing, but didn't have
to walk until the second day. New
uSo vo,l want a n0sition ON this
nanpr25,
.!yas sir y
snWeII sir If Won were sent ont 10 in
terview somebody. how would yOu 90
about i+23,
.sWell. first | should 90 and ask the
cashier for a sEgh+ advance on my sal
arv. and then
"Never mind. | see you are an ex-
perienced reporter. Chicago News
MANAGING EDrroR-Dubbs. that ed
itoriaI won handed in this morning
was Snlendid niece OF work Sub
editor-T'm Glad Won liked it. It took
me considera HE time 10 nrenare it.
hn+ knew 4 would be anpreciated,
Napagino editor There's only one
tbinc, 7 ,fa,,t 10 c,iticisa In c6nvino
= 'f,i So, Darf,i,, ',l Won n2ada .savoIntion5
ts.aTointion I li ); Yon viii nlease he
oaraf,,I aLor+ tbis in the fntura
ISIl Paebdatar = - a,'Po PoSt Ii,, E,,,,ross
IT, - =, sls... I-4r
tHE calloIaa:9 S:.:5 rom h9IlCuchy was
DSIolo Ul!0 iNI Soi ioo
" nat Is the meaning meaning! ot L.,Isit:i.- ideiI
asked Jhe examiner; ii7hy'
promptly answered the candidate;
" v msky exclaimed the disguised
commissioner :, on want 70 ecllel !
OF the bureau OF htlt'c5'Iloli anu la.L On
a question IhaJ any scilooI poy ~
America can answer. IaeI'l IIleaiis I5ie
same. Wen reepiled, Ihe Caildl-
date, tnat WHISKY an over my