Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1885-07-23
coNslDERlNG THE CHANCES.

CONSIDERING THE CHANCES.
E-4 Confidence in His Wife.
z."Well, what is itp' said the money
clerk at the United States Express office
the other day, as man with a pro-
truding under. lip and defiant con.
tempt for grammar halted before him
and put his dinner bucket. on the
counter.
..Hain't this the place where you
take money that's to be sent some rsP'
said the man, standing on tiptoe and
speaking in a low tone, as he leaned
forward over the counter.
''Yes; did you want to make ship
ment?' S.
"Huh?" fe 1880
did you want to send some money
awayp' . ta 49,
well, no; not this mornln'; but
reckon | will shortly, an so dropped
IN as was goin' along to git a few
items about it. 1t was all right for me
to drop in, wasn't it?"
.'Oh, yes; certainly. What did you
want to know?'
''Well, now, s'posen 1 send forty
dollars Or sich matter to my sister in
Waukegan, an she never gifts it?''
'.But she will get it if you send it. -
Eyes; but how do I know that,
though? .S'posen the train runs again
sumpin. stands on its head, ketches
fire an burns up. where's my forty
dollars then?"
I'm that case the company would
make it good"
81 say the company would pay it
back" ...I-za, =
..But I wouldn't want it back I'd
want my sister to have it. That'd be
my main reason for sendin' it
"She would get it. The company
would pay it to her."
That's all right, then. But s'posen
somebody bulldozes your man on the
cars with club, as 1 heard was done
some'rs not long back. an slides out
with the money, who stands the racket
then-me or the company?'
1.-The company, of course?"
whether they ketch the man or
not?''
Yes" IS
..Hain't there no giggin' back on
that?" @
NO; not a bit of it. -...
No comm back at me with draw
backs, or per cents for this n that?'
''Not at all
sIt's every dollar of it forked over
to my sister is it. no matter what hap
pens?" ..... 49,. ..
Yes; every cent"
Z, els it jist the same in case of benz
struck by lightnin' i 81
Certainly" @*
my wives half brother-the one in
Michigan-had barn struck by light
MIN onest, sot on fire an burnt down,
an Pm switched if the company he
was insured in didn't crawl out of it
somehow or luther, an he's he'd his
nose to the grindstone ever sense on
accounts of it. You say your company
never takes a man by the nape of the
neck even if it gifts chance TOP"
mo. The company guarantees to
it, or make it good" =
That's all right, then, an my ole
woman hain't so tormented smart as
she thinks she is. y sas58
why SOP s.~-.. --.s.n-,.
"She said there wasn't no safe way of
gittin' the money to Liza Ann bur to
nave IfSI ~ du C1hc IL W uCI. DuG L
thought l could see through her tie
game, an so concluded I'd ct few
items and find out for myself how the
thing onraveled. Between you an me.
I've got bulky sort of a notion the ole
woman wants to flare out little with
some new buds. an if she was to git
her claws on to that money l don't
b'lieve Liza Ann would ever see red
of it, notwithstandn she was good
enough to lend it to me quite spell
ago, when I was considerable hard up.
NV ole woman is wel1-meanin' an a
mddlin' pr mp housekeeper, but she's
ruther too deep sot on tomfoolery to be
trusted much IN money matters, an I'd
about as soon put money into a bank
an give up hopes of it at onst, as to
have her git her hands on it. She
don't mean nothin' wrong about it I
reckon. but I's'pose she jest can't help
it, an she wouldn't have that money
about her ten minutes before she'd go
to foolin' it away on. bustles an back
hair an sich other nonsense as shield
happen to get her mind sot on. I'm a
good deal much obleeged to you, sir,
an I'll give you the handlin' of that
money as l come along tomorrow.
Even if you ruled out ightnin' I'd risk
it blamed sight quicker would the
ole woman. - Chicago Ledger. ,.fe
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