Grand Rapids morning telegram., 1885-08-17
THEM0NDAY GRUMBLER
WORTHY ASSOCIATES NOTICED.
ho~ Reporters Apologize tor Being
"Sooopeo' The Flag OF War
Floats on the Battlements.

Orumblers are Necessary evils They are
seen everywhere and IN all glasses of society.
There never Was q community - small out
one grumbler was there. Had there been
three III that first family planted III Eden
one Of them would have been q grumbler.
AZ IL was II is 10 be presumed Eve srumbled
because she was denied the fruit of one tree
ia that vast orchard. Grumbling IL always
the easiest for the dissatisfied. and had re-
porter been present 10 record all of that con
yersatlon with the serpent. he undoubtedly
would have made Eve out 10 be grumblef.
One of the first two brothers on earth grum-
bled because the others Offering found more
favor than his Own, and the flrst foul, helm
Gus, bloody and atrocious murder resulted,
although no blood -curdling headlines an
nounced the fact IN the next mornings pa
per. Ii Is not NJ. G's. desire 10 be styled the
chief Of grumblers, and yet his words viii
be chiefly aimed at associates In the busi-
ness. Tben, too, Monday s'generally styled
blue Gay and this may afford more excuse
for melancholy mutterines.
One of NJ. G's. associates IN misery is
of the despondent sort. no sunlight ever
seems TO beam for him. Poor 1T. T." he
has the appearance and manners of man
| who has eaten peck or two Of indigo-he II
was chained To Post and only allowed 10
| pick the daisies and prance about within the
small circumference described by the length
| of the meagre chain. with the held for his
circulation gradually diminishing a. each
| circuit Is made about the stake. Ii seems
perfectly natural for ct. IT, 10 pour forth
| his sad. sepulchral strains upon the un-
| charitable skies, lamenting his own griev-
ances, and perhaps NJ. q. should be charit-
able enough to let the poor fellow wall.
There i disposition upon the part of
| some of the reporters for the daily press of
| this city, as soon as they find themselves
''scooped' on "A good piece of news, 10 pro
| ceed with vengeance TO knock the underpin-
| ming from the little castle builded by his
more fortunate associate upon the rival
sheet. This is neither justice 10 the paper
| for which he works nor 10 the public. which
has right 10 demand the news as
IL is, even though they are getting IT
twenty -four hours late. Many people
read one daily paper, and the late item may
be news to them.
The clouds are filled with signs of war Old
| Mars himself. armed 10 The teeth, has cstab-
| lished his headquarters near the centre of the
| citadel and unfurled his CORY banner 10 the
| skies. BLOOD" IL his war-cry, and before
! another sun may have set in the glorious
| west IL is possible the very cutters may run
| with crimson huid-rich, pure, noble edI-
torial gore. The jig is mp and the wrath of
the war god will not be appeased until some
| one dies. The oft-debated question of
| whether the pen is mightier than the sword
will soon be decided. Ii has already been
decided that one politician lives who Is child
| like and simple minded enough 10 get angry
/ at political cartoon. Boss Tweed, ii. W.
| Beecher, even beloved Cleveland, did nobler
| than this. NJ. G. seriously hopes the city
may not be put to the expense of purchasing
| an iItorlal grave yard IN which his friends
on the Herald and Leader, "Grunts," of the
Times. and perhaps cid NJ. q. himself may
| be buried.
After one of the most roseate, highly er-
| aggerated and sensational accounts of the
| Breeze Messmore conflict, occupying the
| space of two-thirds of column brother
"Garrulous Grunter," of the Times, writes as
| follows:
| Certain papers have partially disclosed n scan
| dial that reflects diseredit upon the members OF
| certain families. The whole matter was consld-
erably cOlored. and really more the result of
| youthful fooishness than anything else II -
unfortunate that 10y not giving the names OF the
| participants shadow II cast upon other estirnh-
| bic young people.
| NJ. q. would say for the benefit of his COM
panion in misery that he has the names of
| the SIX persons who participated IN the mat
/ ter &c. Grunter' refers to. and the ages of
| the youthful" ones range from IL 10 -
years. For the benefit of the public IT may
| also be well TO state that neither of the two
"estimable young people, who perform ed
itorial work upon the Times, were members
of the party.
Strange there are not enough clergymen
in the city to keep the few reporters on the
city's only Monday morning paper busy
during these cool and pleasant Sunday eve
| nings.
There's looseness somewhere. man
sent TO Jail July "a last, for sixty days, and
| upon a criminal charge, was arrested 10y p
| patrolman upon the streets yesterday for
being drunk. The criminal was IN Jail less
than twenty three days: no one had bailed
him out: no judge commuied his sentence.