Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-06-04
WIT OF THE PARAGRAPHFRS

Coal is said to have been discovered
sin the heart of Mexico Aone
Mexico will not have the heart burn
Why shouldn't the office seek the man
IL is unnecessary trouble,
When, if Ii waits, il surely can
Meet offioe-seekers in the van,
Who'll gladly fill it more than double
Mrs. Sprigglns is much exercised IN
know whether the pope let's them car.
dinal fellers wear their red hats wber
the papal bull is loose"
Mamma said little 4.year-old
''this is the calf of my leg isn't it9a
Eyes" "Well, them slappipe hi,
thigh, "this must be the cow"
what must we do to be savedgs
asked the Sunday school teacher of
her new pupil. "Git lost, y was the
very suggestive bat incorrect reply.
SA Missouri editor with misty recol.
lection of the Old Testament floating
through his mind, declares that like
the promised land, Missouri is flowing
with hog and hominy.
-Four men were carrying the mang-
led body of man into house Has
there been an accident?' inquired
bystander. "Oh, no, replied one Of
the men. Hes only been practicing
for a game of polo at the roller rink.
A darkey, having heard that ex.
Gov. Jarvis has been appointed envoy
extraordinary and minister plenlpo.
tertiary to Brazil, told another darkey
that Gov. Jarvis had been appointed
an extraordinary preacher to the peni.
tertiary in Brazil.
What this day and age of the world
needs is phrenologist who will paw
around among the intellectual homes
of free born American citizens and
search out few men who can milk
cow in cool and unlmpassionate tone
Of voice.
oh, I'm king and an emperor proud
lord and princely peer,
And sovereign bold-with power untold
And wealth galore year.
dwell in block, pay no rent,
I'm chief and autocrat
And woe TO the man who comes under my ban
I'm janitor in a flat
The supreme court of Pennsylvania
has decided that unless persons look
both ways in crossing a railroad track
they cannot obtain damages for in
juries they may receive. This gives
cross eyed people decided advantage
over those who can see straight, and
in some measure tnitigates the afllic
ton Of being cross-eyed. Life is full
of compensations.
The women's Fighters nave a right,
of Lost fn foal anno,,uona1 II for
Constantinople, where woman has
never soul to save, the fair sex has
riz and shrieked, and bulldozad the
government. They declared 'the Sub
lime Port is no Bossphorus.n
Call again" he said to the butcher
Call again another day.
The butcher pocketed his bill
And sadly turned away.
Hes busted" said the butcher,
'Flat.broke, alack-a.dayl
He is an honest customer;
Too bad he cannot pay"
The butcher took his wife that night
To see a four-bit play;
But ia fifty-doa box
Sat the man who couldn't pay.
A short time ago q New Hamp-
shire man wished TO run a telephone
wire from his effice to his residence.
Its best line lay over a cottage, where
in resided two venerable maiden ladi-
es, one of whom answered his re
quest fer permission to use the route
with the statement that while she
Should be glad to accommodate him,
the noise made by people constantly
talking over her head would be too
annoying to permit it
According to the Phenix Register,
there is a tax collector in that vicini-
ty wha was around a few days ago
looking for Mr.. w. U. Telegraph.
He had discovered The name on his
books and as he was unscquainted
with him he asked a friend if be knew
him and what sort of looking per-
son he was. The friend replied that
he knew him well; that he was very
tall man. He didn't know where Mr..
vas living now, but
thought the postmaster could give
him his address.
How doth the little snion
Pop up its little head,
Ana the restless little raddish
Stretch in its little bed.
The sunfsh and the minnow
Wag their shiny little tails,
While the chipmunk and the robin
AdOrn the fences rails.
The blossom 10y the hedge side
And on the boss nose
Tell of the coming sDring time
And blooming of the rose.
1t is stated as Curious fact that
when the late Empress OF Russia was
with her daughter, the Ouch
esS Of Edinburgh, with a large suite,
the Duke gave her TO understand that
he could not afford to entertain her,
and he should be obliged if, on her
departure, she would order the comp
troller of the suite TO pay an adequate
sum for the expenses OF her Vi it.
At the moment OF departure, after
luncheon had been taken, the Duke
Of Edinburgh drew a paper from his
pocket, on which he had noted down
the estimated expenses of the Russian
Empress and he added the cost of the