Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1885-09-09
BRIGHT BITS.

AT a city restaurant:
Say. waiter. your hens must be very old"
"Why so, sir?"
Because all your eggs are stale. - Boston
Budget.
CALINARD was at the circus watching a
FAMILY of acrobats performing feat termed
the human ladder. A strapping Young fellow
bears the weight Of the entire pyramid.
Now. II / had a daughter" said G. to
neighbor, 81 would give her to that young
man. l like young fellows who are capable
OF supporting family lie NdsGte de Fer.
"Ah, doctor, they tell me you have been
buying another new house. How can Won
afford it?' Doctor" Easy enough. Summer
business, al owing to summer business"
"l1ow's thatP DOctOr-'Wel, in the first
place 20 INTO tho country where there is a
rush Of city folks. A least half get sick wtle
away, and the other half sick afler they re-
turn home. where am ready to receive them
Money at both ends, don't you see? Millions
In 1t. "-BOStOR Irdnsc4iDt.
A NEGRO BOY, while walking along the
street, took of his hat and struck at wasp
that had alighted on a tan shrub hanging over
fence. The boy put on his hat, turned to a
man and said:
Il thought got lat ar ole wass."
Didn't you get him."
mo. sab, but" he snatched of his hat,
clapDed his hand on the top OF his head,
sqnatted, hOwled, and said:
BLAINE & didn' SIT dat ole wass. "-Arban-
SdIo Trd0sler
NIsTToR-And who is that bTight-lookipg
gentleman with the ripplingsmiie. who seems
to be the life of the Office; and ] declare, the
others are all laughing az something he has
SAID; ne Is your hninorst. SUPPOSE
EditCT--No; he is our obituary writer. He
does the solemn work of the Establishment
Attends the funerals and writes the obituary
notices.
Visitor-Why, should have thought that
solemn looking man with the woebegOne face
who Is pushing his fingers through his hair
and looking up 10 the ceiling, was your obit-
Bditor--oh. no, That's our funny man.
Boston Courier.
MAKE new friends, but keep the old
Those are silver. these are gold;
New made friendships like new wine,
A ge will mellow aud refine.
friendships that have stood the test
Time and ehange-are surely best:
Brow may wrinkle, HAIR grow gray,
Friendship never knows decay,
For mid old friends, tried and true,
Once more we our youth renew.
But old friends, alas may die.
New friends must their place supply,
Cherish friendship IN your breast,
New Is good, but old is best;
Make new friends, but keep the old,
Those are silt er, these are gold.
MOsEBY, VINO has been away from town
some time. returned the other day. Shortly
atterward friend met him and, noticing
asked:
''Moseby, what's the matter, old fellow"
"Ruine6"
''What2''
"a financial wreck"
'How did it Occur?'
"Weli, yOu see had charge of a bridge not
| far from here. The owners OF the bridge are
| very particular shout receiving every cent
| that is due them, SO they put n one of those
/ registers. 10 10 "a sort OF fool arrangement,
! sunk IN the foot passage-way of the bridge
and makes mark with q clicking punch
every time anynody steps on it. Wen, every
| thing was all right until the other dav. A big
Newfoundland dog 20 1 on the blamed thing
and began to scratch himself. and, sir, before
] noticed him he had charged noe up with
| S275. Yes, l am a ruined map.-A rkansao
T5rqreIer