Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1885-12-03
,aturo. It's not fair to the nymphs

nature. It's not fair to the nymphs
of the magic ring to show them with
their forms bolstering up scene like
policeman pursuing his evening
ayocation at the area gate. Nymphs
OF the magic ring don't act that way
at all, and it jars on one to see fairy
slip ham sandwich from under her
and bite it on the sly. That isn't the
nature OF fairies. Fairies have no call
for sandwiches. Then do get rilod
to see Roman soldier turn away from
Marc Antony's Grafton to challenge a
Thracian slave to game of penuckle,
and loaf around with his shanks in old
Rome and his mind in the beer saloon
around the corner. It's not Justice to
the ancient Romans, and it's hard on
Marc Antony and his little speech,
too"
care there many professional auxil-
iariesp'
''Of course. Lots of people are we'll
fitted by their height of figure for
making part of an effective tableau.
Some of them don't look any higher.
But then there are lots who do and
who get there, too. MANY good actors
aud actresses by doing the grand
standing around act, and others are
ready to follow them. A fellow often
makes hit without opening his
mouth. Look ut the Lone Fisherman
in 'Evangeline.' Not word from
him. Why, there is Harry Dixey him.
self used to play the hind legs of the
heifer in 'Evangeline, and he didn't
make much of par of propellers
either. l needn't say anything about
the other sex. Numbers of them have
rushed into popular favor on shape
ly ankle, or caught the public fancy
with plump arm. But say, i must
be going. 1t you want to hear what a
stage figure has to say about the bust
ness I'll call one. You can't fire off a
gun in Union square without hitting
one of them fellows. Hello, there!
sayr'
a struggling genius in an alpaca
coat, who seemed to keep his hair done
up in tinfoi all night, so as to cluster
about two backward but expansive
ears, heard the call, and seemed to
think there was an engagement ring
about it. For he slipped up at once.
quite gaily, but assumed crushed and
dismal air when he heard what was
expected of him.
"YOu figure in spectacles, don't
youP" asked the reporter, as the new
conner occurred to his memory in con-
nection with a military pageant and n
procession of ancient stage men-at
arms.
IL liggers in anything I'm paid for
iiggerin' in, said the other. Come up
stairs if you wants to talk"
The reporter followed him to the
agency anteroom.
Yes" he resumed, II figgers i'm
spectacles with a spear as hasn't got
no point onto it. and plate armor made
out o. rum tiXin's,"
There was an air of misanthropy
and cynicism about the man that was
quite melancholy.
''Do you like it?"
"Notif knows myself Some codg-
ers, | 'spose, takes some stock in the
females with no clothes to speak of on
'em and in the dresses, and all that.
j don't. Pm looking for the price.
And it don't pay. Fifty cents night,
and sometimes "A dollar, with an en-
gagement now and then at ten week
il there's some foolery to be done,
doesn't pay chap like me. It's q
bad business tell you.
''But the surroundings are pleasant
! should Think"
"Oh, them be bowed. What's the
fun % carrying Il wooden spear around
and holding Il string o paper flowers
over dancing gals head, or putin
OH one o. them old Roman night shirts
and hollern' yoursc hoarse over
some bad actors spout n. 1t amt
no good tell you. And then to think
of hanging around timber throne
and drinking out o gilded goblets with
not blessed drop in ON. and dinin'
ever so jol Y OIL property grub, with
the orchestra : DING like mad, and the
gals with their cast iron smiles hooiin'
1t around you, and the people thinkin'
what high old time you're havin'
and you all the while a-dyin' for a
glass o. beer. There amt no fun in
it.
you've appeared in many partsp"
"Yes, I've been soiers and sailors
and niggers and lnjuns and peasants
and Gypses and joints"
"And whatp"
"And joints. Joints in the panto-
mines, with big pasteJoa head
and body TO match-them what eats
little kids in the story book"
"Oh, giants"
II said joints"
"What did you have to dop"
"All kinds O. foolin'. If you want
me to, I'll perform.
"Good. Do so.
The figure stood half upright, with
his arms hanging down to his thighs.
He looked like a hired man on a
strike.
That's waryear," said he.
He marched across the room like a
mute at funeral.
'Roman sojer goin' to battle" he
explained.
He grabbed his hip and thigh peck
cts coincidentally, and as he jerked
them up, gave n bob of the head.
".ible seaman" he remarked.
He waddled like duck and swung
! his arms like windmill.
! ''Honcst yeomanry."
He waved his hands in the air and
bawled, Hey, yeh, yehp'
Excited populace."
He repeated the gesture and
shouted. "Down with i'm! Down with
/ 'imv
''Mutiny or war.
He hoped about, brandished one