Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1885-08-19
Tom Sheridan.

added social talents, which, if not of
the high and commanding order of
his fathers, where infinitely more
agreeable to those who knew him, used
to tell story, for and against himself
and here it is:
He was staying at Lord Craven's,
at Benham for rather Hampstead),
and one day proceeded on a shooting
excursion, like Hawthorn, with only
"his dog and his gun" on foot, and
unattended by companion or keeper ;
the sport was bad; the birds few and
shy, and he walked and walked in
search of game, while unconsciously
he entered the domain of some neigh
boring squire.
A very short time after, he perceiv-
ed advancing toward him, at the top
of his speed, jolly, comfortable-look-
ing gentleman, followed by servant,
armed, as it appeared, for conflict.
Tom took up position and waited
for the approach of the enemy.
"Hallo! you, sir" said the squire
when within half ear shot; what are
you doing here, sir, eh ?"
"Im shooting, sir" said Tom.
"Do you know where you are, sir ?"
said the squire.
81 am here, sir" said Tom.
Here, sir !" SAID the squire, grow
ing angry, land do you know where
here is, sir? These, sir, are my
manors what dye think of that, sir,
eh?
"Why, sir, as to your manners"
said Tom, 81 can't say they seem over
agreeable"
Il don't want any jokes, sir" said
the squire. 81 hate jokes. Who are
you, sir-what are youf"
"Why, sir" said Tom, "my name
is Shsridan-I am staying at Lord
Craven's-I came out for SPORT
have not had any and 1 am not aware
that am trespassing."
sheridan !" said the squire, cool
ing little. "Oh from Lord Cra-
ven's, eh =? Well, sir, l could not
know that"
NO." said Tom, "but you need not
have been in a passion"
"Not in passion, Mr.. Sheridan" F"
said the squire, "you don't know, sir,
what these preserves have cost me,
and the pains and trouble l have been
at with them; it's all very well for
you to talk, but if you were in my
place, / should like to know what you
would do upon such an OCCASION"
"Why, sir" said Tom, "if 1 were
in your place, under all the circum-
stances, l should say: Il am convinc-
ed, Mr.. Sheridan, that you did not
mean to annoy me, and as you look a
good deal tired, perhaps you'll come
up to my house and take some refresh
ments.' >"
The squire was hit hard by this
and, it is needless to add,
acted upon Sheridan's suggestion.
$50 far" said poor Tom, "the story
tells for me-now you shall hear the
sequel"
After having regaled himself at
the squire's house. and having said
five hundred more good things than
he swallowed; having delighted his
wife and daughters, the sportsman
proceeded on his return homeward.
In the course of his walk he passed
through farm yard. In the front
of the farm house was a green, in the
center Of which was a pond-in the
pond were ducks innumerable swim
ming, on its verdant banks a motley
group Of gallant cocks and pert part
lets, picking and feeding; the farmer
was leaning over the hatch of the
barn, which stood near two cottages
on the side of the green
Tom hated to 60 back with an emp
ty bag, and having failed in his at
tempts at higher game it struck him
as a good joke to ridicule the exploits
of the day himself, in order to pre-
vent any one else from doing so fer
him, and he thought that to carry
home certain number of the domes-
tic inhabitants Of the pond and its
would serve the purpose ad-
Accordingly up he goes to
the farmer and accosts him very civil
ly.
my good FRIEND" says Tom, "I'll
make you an Offer"
"Of what, sur ?" says the farmer.
"Why," replies Tom, II have been
out all day tagging after birds and
haven't had a shot. Now, both my
barrels are loaded. / should like to
take home something. What shall l
give you to let me have shot with
each barrel at those ducks and fowls
i standing here and to have what
ever kill2"
"What sort of shot are you ?"
said the farmer.
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