The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1885-07-10
Daniel o'connell and Blddy Hrori-


The following is printed verbatim
from "Madden's Revelations OF Ireland"
When Daniel O'Connel was yet a
young man his talent for vituperative
language was so great that he was
deemed matchless as q scold. There
lived in Dublin a certain woman, Biddy
Moriarty by name, who kept a huckster
stall on one of the quays nearly oppo
site the Four Courts. She was a first
class virago-formidable with both fist
and tongue-so that her voluble i'm
pudence had become almost %proverbial
in the country roundabout.
Some of 0'Connel's friends thought
that he could defeat her with her own
weapons, while others ridiculed the
idea. The Kerry barrister could not
stand this; so he backed himself for q
match. Bets were offered, and taken,
and it was decided that the matter
should be settled at once. So proceed
ing to the huckster's stall with a few
friends O'Connell commenced the at
tack on the old lady.
What's the price of this walking
stick, Mrs. What's-your-name?
"Moriarty, sir, is my name, and a
good one it is; and what have you to
say agin it and one-and- six-pence's the
price Of the stick. Troth it's chapS as
dirt, so it is"
"One-and-sixpence for a walking
stick; whew! Why, you are no better
than an impostor to ask eighteen pence
for what cost you two pence"
1.-TWO pence, your grandmother" re-
piled Mrs. Biddy. "Do you name TIC
say that's chatting the people / am?
Impostor, indeed"
CAY, impostor; and it's that / call you
to your teeth" reioined O'Connell.
"Come, cut your stick, you cantanker-
aus iackanapes.n
keep a civil tongue in your head,
you old diagonal" cried 0'Connell,
calmly.
"Stop your jaw, you pug-nosed
badger, Oh by this and that" cried Mrs.
Moriarty, "I1l make you go quicker nor
you came"
Don't be in q passion, my old radius
anger will only wrinkle your beauty"
"By the hockey, if You say another
word of impudence, I'd tan your dirty
hide, you bastely common scrub; and
sorry I'd be to soil my fists upon your
carcase."
"Whew boys, what d passion old Bid
dy is liz / protest as / am a gentleman
-
"Jintlemanl jintlemanl the likes Of
you a jintleman! Wisha, by gor, that
bangs Banager. Why, you potato-faced
pippin-sneezer, when did a NADIA.
gascar monkey like you pick enough Of
ccmmon Christian decency to hide your
Kerry brogue?"
EASY now-easy now" cried econ
nell, with imperturbable good humor;
don't choke yourself with fine lam
guage, you old whiskey drinking psral-
telegram"
Whats tina. Won call me Won mnr-
derin' villain ?" reared Mrs. Moriarty,
stung with fury.
"I call you, " answered O'Connell, "a
parallelogram and q Dublin Judge and
jury will say that it's no libel to call
you So"
"Oh, tare-an-ounsi oh, holy Biddyl
that an honest woman like me should be
called q parrybellygrum to her face.
I'm none of your parrybellygrums, you
rascally galiovs bird; you cowardly
meaking. plate lickin' bliggardp
"Oh, not you, indeedi" retorted
O'Connell; why, Isuppose you'll deny
that you keep . ~hypothenuse in your
house"
It's tie for you, you BY roDDer;
/ never had such q thing in my house,
swindling thief."
"Why, sure all your neighbors know
very we'll that you keep not only a
hypothenuse, but that you have two
diameters locked up in your garrett,
and that you go out to walk with
them every Sunday, you heartless old
heptagon."
"Oh, hear that, ye saints in glory
Oh, there's bad language from Q fellow
that wants to pass for q jintleman. May
the desil fv away with you. you wicher
from Munster. and make celery-sauce OF
your rotten limbs, you mealy-mouthed
tub of guts.D
"Ah, you can't deny the charge, you
miserable sub-multiple Of a duplicate
ratio"
go, rinse your mouth in the Liffey,
you nasty ticklepitcher after all the bad
words you speak it ought to be filthier
than your face, you dirty chicken OF
Beelzebub.n
Rinse your own mouth, you wicked
minded polygon-to the deuce I pitch
you, you clustering intersection Of o
sing superfciesl"
"You saucy tinker's apprentice, if you
don't cease your jaw I'll But here
she gasped for breath, unable to hawk
up any more words, for the last volley
of O'Connell had nearly knocked the
wind out Of her.
while I have q tongue I'll abuse
you. you most inimitable periphery.
Look at her, boysl there she stands-a
convicted perpendicular in p~etticoats
I Tl ~--s- -~k.~osk- - haw of~nar~o