davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24
Colorels. Majors, or Irdso.
Denver News

We'll, I've looked the thing over
pretty thoroughly, and I've sizsd up
a good many of the men who are most
frequently called b. high sounding
titles, and I've got a plan by which |
can designate every man of title as
soon as / lay my eye on him. Now,
mind! there are many honorable exs
ceptions; but if you would like to
know the way how to tell a man with
a title so as 70 address him just right
I'll tell you iast what to do. And
mind it's a pretty dangerous thing to
call a man by a title below the grade
to which he thinks he belonga."
II really would like to have the re
cipe.n
"All right. When you see a little,
Insignificant looking man taking long
strides, and wearing a plug hat, il he
is over 30 years, you address him as
captain
IF he's pretty stout, and has a
plain red nose, and smells of bad
whiskey and cob pipe, he is a una,
jor.'
IF a man is large framed, or only
very tall, ana has a red nose with a
wart upon the side of it, you will be
dead safe in calling him colonel
Now, II the man is large, or, as |
said before, only tall, and has a grey
maStache or beard, drinks his whisky
straight, and a good big drink at that
if he has a loud voice and q very red
nose with two warts upon it, he's a
general every time, and don't you
ever seem to forget the factln
Judges are a little harder to place.
Any man who has practiced in a JUS
tees court or has been a Justice or 8
clerk for a justice of the peace can
with perfect safety be addressed as
Judge
80 you think you've got 1t all
down fine. do you, sir2"
Well, you just bet your life, colon
ell
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24
The Maelstr0m.

The naelstrom, watch means llter>
ally translated, grinding stream" is
the most remarkable whirlpool ia the
world. it is situated on the Norweg>
ian coast, just southwest of the Lotto
den Isles. 1t runs between the Isl
lands Moskenes and a large solitary
rock in the middle of the straits. The
strong currents rushing between the
Great West Fjord and the outer
ocean through the channels of the
Lotfoden Isles produce a number of
whlrlpools, of which the maelstrom is
by far the most dangerous. Such ex~
trsvagant stories have been told of
this eddy-how everything that ents
ers the border of its current is instant>
ly sucked down into a bottomless
abyss-that its very existence has
been doubted. However. an exams
nation was made of it in 1859 by the
Nor vegian photographic survey, and
an official report made. From this
report we learn that in sumper the
current is comparatively calm for a
short time at food or ebb tide, when
boats may venture upon it. In calm
weather steamers can cross ii at any
state of the tide, or large ships, if q
steady wind is blowing. But in win
ter or in storms it is highly dangerous
for any vessel to try to pass the whirl-
pool. During a storm from the west,
for instance, the current runs contin-
ually to the casts at a rate of SIX knots
an hour, without changing its direc-
tons for rising or falling tide, and
the stream Will boil and eddy in auch
mighty wAirls that the largest steam
could hardly contend successfully
with the waters. OF course, the dang
er is not of suction into the heart of
the whirlpool, as legends have sup.
posed, but of being dashed to pieces
against the rocks. Dead whales are
sometimes thrown upon the neighbor-
ing coast which have evidently been
killed in this way. The depth of the
whirlpool is only twenty fathoms,
but just outside the straits soundings
reach from 100 to 200 fathoms.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24
Why Drunken Men Stagger.
Philadelphia Times

"Why does a man stagger when he
is drunk9"
4 representative Philadelphia,
nhysician, scientist and philosopher
addressed this query to a News repre-
sentative the other afternoon on Chest
nut street, as they passed by a WE'LL
dressed. gentlemanlyolooking young
man. who had evidently looked
through the bottom of too many wine
glasses.
"You must know" SAID the Doctor
IN response TO a request for a plain
but scientific explanation, "that the
nervous system, which has its seat in
the brain and spinal cord, divides its
responsibility among its segeral parts,
much 'as in the executive department
of the government the responsibility
is supdivided, but centers in one head
the president of the United States.
In the case of man the cerebellum
presides over the coordination of
movement. the cerebrum over voli-
tional life, and the medulia oblongata
over respiration. In the case Of alec
bol intoxication the influence is first
felt in the cerebellum, and the victim
leoses that control over the movement
OF his muscles which characterizes
him in his normal state. This is the
reason he staggers. II the intoxica
ton is carried further, the cerebrum
is attacked, and he loses all control
over his thoughts, his power of ex-
pressing himself intelhgently, and,
IN fact, all his intellectual faculties
are benumbed. When this ~narcotiza-
ton becomes complete the man is dead
drunk. In many instances the intox,
ication has 20 affected that part Of the
spinal cord which presides over SEN
sation, that surgical operations have
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24
A MONEY DRESSER.
How One Man Wakes a Living la the
Grea Metropolis.
New York Sun

An old coin man visits the offices
of the elevated railroad every few
days to- PURCHASE the worn and plugged
coin taken in at the stations, and re
fused at the banks, as well as the
foreign coin. He also buys up the
mutilsted silver, nickels, and coppers
that are dropped by absent-minded
passengers into the gate boxes. There
are many persons who, on getting
their change with a ticket at the wins
dow of the ticket Office, will carefully
put the ticket in their pockets, ana
will drop their change in the toll col
lector's box. Some ladies' drop their
pocketbooks in, while they hold their
tickets with great care. Inside Of each
box, there is a cylinder full of teeth,
and when a piece of coin gets into
the receptacle below, it has two holes
in it or is clipped at the edges. Every
day the mass of mutllated tickets is
overhauled IN the main Office before
being sent into the waste, and these
coins are sifted cat. From five to
hfty dollars a day have been picked
out in this way. The money is so
Hiutllhtsd ludt ~ Chu uOb NC phoatAt
and it is sold to the old coin man for
about 20 cents on the dollar.
This curious Spectator sometimes
carries away 5000 or 500 worth Of
such coin. He calls himself a money
dresser" a business which he insists
is just as legitimate as that OF a "cof>
fee polisher,n or a dry-goods dresser.
He beats out the twisted and bruised
coin, cleans the soiled copper, bright~
ems the foreign coin, and goes on his
tour TO dispose of his goods. The
foreign money is sold to the stewards
OF foreign vessels, and the poor Ameri-
can coin is worked Of at the cattle
yards and sent out west. Much OF it
finds its way into the hands of the
cowboys, who spend it as freely as
though ii were fresh from the mint.
The money dresser searches his
purchases very carefully, and coca
sionally finds an old coin that pays
him several hundred per cent. profit
when resold to collectors OF rare
coins.
"Do you make a living IN this
way2n
Indeed l do, and a very nice living
too"
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24
In THE NEXT ROOm

In the dim and early morning,
Ere the bells had given warning,
lean hear her bare feet patting
on her char7ber's humble mating;
Hear the ice clink in the basin
That she laves her lovely face in,
And, by dint OF studious guessing,
The slight hustle Of her dressing.
Then al evening l a hear her
Place her lamp beneath her mirror,
And remove the combs combining
Her soft hair in bandeaux shining,
Then l list a moment later,
Till l hear her tiny gaiter.
Fitting for its fair deposit,
Tossed into the corner closet,
oft | hear her silvery laughter
Echoing from the c~obwehbed rafter,
AS, worn out with silence lonely,
Talks she with her sweet self only;
And IL minds me of a swallow
In the balmy ives hatfellow
June's sweet month of leafy glory,
Twittering many a sweet love story
Soft and tender and imprisoned,
From the caves nest 1t has fashioned.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

Mexican officials estimate that the
yearly loss to the treasury OF Mexico
by smugelsng along the northern
frontier is not less than 81, 800, 600. The
United States Consul at Guaymas plaes
the value of goods Struggled from this
country across the Arizona frontier at
5000, 000annually.
Thirty Hungarians, men, women,
and children, have landed at Her
mosillo, Mexico. The men are blacks
smiths and boiler makers.
Sitka, Alaska, is to have a ne wspa-
per. 1t will be called The Alaskan,
and be devoted to the development OF
the material resources of the territory.
There is a society in Memphis the
object OF which is 10 furnish collins
to its members at greatly redued
prices.
Three million pupils now attend the
free schools in tue Southern States,
and over 80, 900, 900 is annually rails
ed to support them.
A thimbleful Of dust was found in
the coffin Of Richard Occur de Leon,
at the Cathedral Of Rouen, when 1t
was opened not long ago.
Among the assets OF an estate just
settled at Auburn, n. T., was 10000
worth of street railway stock, which
brought only ten cents.
A stage line established 100 years
o between Showkegan, Me-, and
Quebec distance Of 200 miles-is
still maintained and well patronized.
San Francisco fishermen say the
seals and sea-lions in the harbor must
go, since they consume A, 900 tons Of
fish a year-enough to supply the
whole city.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

the report comes from Russia that
the Car is about to ~promulgate a
constitution. 1t is intimated that this
important step would have been taken
last year but for the difficulties with
England in regard to the Afghan
boundary. The statement has even
been made by some who profess to be
informed that the Asiatlc question
vas precipitated in its most recent
phase by opponents OF the proposed
reform. Considering the personal re-
lations of the Car to his people it is
not at all singular that he should
endeavor to conciliate them by a
measure such as that proposed, though
such action on his part would mark a
step in advance for which the world
has not been quite prepared. To
those, however, who recall the great
emancipation act issued by the pres
ent Cars father in 1861, there should
be no cause for astonishment in the
fact that the crown should take the
further step indicated in the endeavor
to strengthen itself with the people.
Nothing is known as yet as to the
scope of the proposed constitution,
and any opinion as to its possible
effect would be premature.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

been performed without producing
the sensation of pain. The last por-
ton of the system affected by the pos
tations of the drunkard is the meduila
oblongata When this becomes mar
cotized, respiration ceases, and death
ensues.
Il have gone even further than
your original question implied, and
have given you all the stages of
drunkenness 1t is when the inhu>
ence of the alcohol is felt IN no other
portion OF the brain than the cerebe.
lium when the Individual is said to
be drunk in the legs, but all right in
the head.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

Misery-A girl with a new dress and
no place to go. More misery.-A girl
without a new dress and some place to
20. Additional misery-A girl with
a new dress and some place to go, and
no 'feller" 10 go with her. Greatest
misery Of all-Girl with new dress, a
place 10 go to, and a ''feller" to take
her, but stern parent in hot pursuit,
o~vertaking the dress, the girl and the
"fsller," and compelling the first two
to return to the home they have
abandoned through a second story
window.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

A shooting match took place recent
" in Canada between twenty smok-
ers and the same number of non
smokers. The smokers won by TWEEN
". five points.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

a poor servant Of Brosme Cotnty,
NY, who married the son OF a rich
man two years ago, has just. had a
verdict for 81, 900 against her father
in.law awarded her on the ground
that he alienated her husbands affec-
tons, in consequence of which she had
again TO earn her own living.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

SAID an Iowa Judge the other day
"But fur housewives Of the United
States there could BIO no tramPs, and
any woman who feeds one ought to
be sent to jail for thirty days"
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

Dogs at Hotel Humarock, Scituate
beach, made for the patrolInen from
the life saving station when they be-
gan their duties this season. The land
lord had to interfere.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1885-09-24

The White house letter paper is OF
the finest quality, with beautifully
printed heading. Jefferson headed
his own foolscap with a quill pen.
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
rED CAT


4
Where is my boy tonight" +"
as the title of a very touching
song. 1t isthe wall, couched in
poetry and set to music, of the
great mother heart, over the
waywardness Of a much loved
son. A good many mothers il,
Stromsburg and other villages,
might appropriately ask the
same question, concerning their
J tile boys. "Where is my boy
Tonight Well, four chances
out of five, if you don't know
where be is, you will find him
playing the hoodlum on the
streets. He is not where he
should be, for he should be at
home. A boy should have a
pleasant home and every effort
should BE- made to keep him at
home after night. Keep your
boys at home, as much as posi-
BILE, mothers, and you will not in
after years have tn utter the sad
wall Of @Where is my boy to-
night: Don't let them run wild,
while they are under Your con-
troll and then, il they go to the
devil in after years, charge it up
TO Notwithstanding Re-
publican.
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
Colby, Kansas.

: The fs!rest Of them all is Thomas county,
- told BY . Kansas City Journal correspon.
uonf:
The nrst building was raised in Colby on
Nay 6. this year, and now there are thirty OF
forty buildings in town. and new ones are 60
ing up as fast - mcu and money can build
them. This h the center Of Thomas county
has bssutifu town site. and 10 destined to he
cosssy seat and . nourishing business point
It has the right kind Of git up aud git to 1t
and has the prettiest county In the state
20 support it, Thomas county is very ner,
~il soon be organized. has nearly all Of h,
best government land taken, and is having
plenty Of good heavy rains this summer. Ths
settlers arc 1ubilant.
DIR. D. N. Dunn. president Of the Colby Town
Company, was formerly proprietor of the Min
Deapols, Ksns. Messenger. lie il the pro-
prietor Of the far-fsmei THOMAS CAT, the
nrst newspaper IN the world ever called the
rOA CAT. He Is q genial gentleman and
specially iitted for his position rs president of
the town company.
J. Aud, an old acquaintance, was unex.
pectedly found there in the furniture business.
The Chicago Lumber company has opened
mp quite an extensive yard at this place
". H. Copeland, the principal real estate
agent, Is busy every day looking after aud
showing somebody land.
Miller Z Mills ars propristers OF one Of the
hotsaA They are build1no now building
9sraptdb 6 pessfble. Their old hotel is a
pooosor noveaey. had rad q such having
sxiassnce twenty Ave or thirty years ago. when
arys settlements were made In this state, but
until this trim hnd never sfeu one. II IL
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
NOTICE No. Asa.
L. S. Land OiEce, wa-Keeney. Kansas.

C.S. Land Oifce, wa-keeney. Kansas.
July 4. 1876.
Complaint having been entered nj this office
by William J. McEwon against Henry Loefilcr
turc entry No. :ss4. dated June G, 1879, upon
the So or sec :. town ii south. range 81 west I'm
st. John county. Kansas, with view 10 the
cancellation of saia entry; contestant alleging
that the said Henry II. LOciiier has failed to
break or plOw or cause to be broken or plowcd
any Part of Snid lanh since date of entry. ard
has failed to plant or cause to be planted to
trees. seeds Gr cuttings AIRY part whatever of
said land. or TO cultivate any part thereof
since date of entry.
The said parties are hereby summoned TO aT-
pear At this office on the 22d day of August,
1885. ut O'Clock p. to respond and furnish
testimony concerning said alleged failure.
B J. +. HANNA, Register.
Osbo-.. j Monroe. l99jyl8
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
Important Letter from the Gov
ernor.
Topeka, July Is, 1885.

AOfhAA, July 1cs iccc-
D. ". DrSx, ESQ,
Colby, Thomss Co., Kansas.
MY DEAR sIR;-I have received your letter
Of July 18th, and thank you sincerely for your
kind commendation Of my efforts to protect
the people of southwestern Karsas against
the dangers of an Indian raid.
! have requested the Adjutant GeneIal to
send you authority for the organization of q
military company. / do not know whether
runs and ann u ition can now he furnished, As
every gun In the State armory was forwarded
90 southwestern Kansas, last week. for srming
military organizations in that region.
Ny impression is that you are in no possible
danger In Thomas county. The points expos
Cd are In the southwest, and think the pre-
BIZ companies Of State militia have been or
9onizod and armed, in the counties OF
COmanche, Clark, Meade and Finney. The
general commanding this department has also
paniee OF cavalry near kOwa. in Barber coun
~. and four other companies at Deep Hole, In
Cark county. General Angur assured me
tablishod should be maintained until a posi-
BE danger of an Indian invasion was q. er, and
General sheridan gave me the sarnc assurance,
passed throuh Topeka going to Fort Reno.
have since written to General Sheridan a most
earnest letter, appealing to him not only TO ne
tain the posts already established, but to e.
tablish another post on the Cimarron near tho
southeast corner Of Seward county. If thin
u done, and have hopes that it will be. We
shAll have three posts, covering the southern
border q hundred miles, from Barber county
almost to the west line of the State. The pres
ence OF there troops, and the military organ.
xations effected in the country adjacent to
them. ought to be sufficient not only to repel
any Indian invasion that might he attempted
but to give the settlers assurance of prOtec,
; ton and security. / shall orait no efforts to
urge upon the government and the military
authorities Of this department the duty they
owe to the people Of Kansas to protect our
border against any possible Indian raid. The
state of Kansas ought not to be called upon to
maintain etanding army at its southern Dor
Der 10 keep out the Indians. Tbs gSS.-ql gov
eminent i>--sleA sor the. ta<Trowi of the
arsr 40. ..iy lissatis-
faction among the tribes in the Territory, and
y b It's plain duty to protect the peaceful set
tiers OF Kansas against all possibility OF dan
GER, not only OF aid, butof a Ianic growing
out Of fear OF one.
The Adjutant General has bsen instructed 20
do al In his power to comply with the request
you make.
Yours, very respectfully,
JNO. A. MARTIN.
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION No. 3los.

NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION No. 3lo2.
Land Office at Ohcrlin, Kans.
July IL. lSS5.
Notice is hereby given that the foliowins
named settler has filled notice of his inrrn.
ton to make final proof in support of his
claim, and that said proof will be made be.
fore the Register and Receiver at Oberlin.
Kansas, on Sept. 23. 1855, VIZ: c. NJ Dunn
D. S. No 1887 for the NV Or sec Is, town Z
south, range 81 west.
lie names the following witnesses to prove
his continuous residence upon and c,llrivs.
tion of said land. viz: Jacob Alling. Is. F.
Brown, Edward BrotuertOn. Alison Casey
all Of Colby, Kansas.
A. l.. PArCHIS. Registe-.
c. C. Reynolds % 25jya3
NOTICEFOR PUBLICATION No. s4ol.
Land Office at 0oerlin, Kan sas.
July IL, 1855
Notice is hereby gwen that the following
named settler has filed notice o: his inten.
rion to Ike final proof in support of his
claim and that said proof will we made be-
fore the Register aud Receiver at Oberlin,
Kansas. on sept Is, 1885, viz: D NJ. Dunn,
u. 5 No 1922 for the Sc or section IL,
town south. range 33 west
He names the following witnesse. to
prove his continu.u> residence upon and
cultivation Of sad land, viz: Jacob Alliny,
. =. Brown, Edward Brothcrtou, Alison
Casey, ali Of Colby. ksusas.
A. L. PAToHix, Register.
I. c. Reynolds ~ 25jy23
NOTICE FOR PUBLIC ALTON No. 3.aO.
L.~nd Once at Oberlin, Kans
July IL, 1855.
Notice is hereby given that the following
named settler has fled notice Of his intrn-
ticn to make final proof in support 4 his
Claim. and that Said proof will be made be.
fore the Register nd Receiver ut Oberl n.
Ksns~. on Sept 23 1895, Wig: w.N Dunn
u. 4. No. 1923, for the sw Or section Is.
town south. range 33 west.
He names the following witnesses to
prove his cont innous residenee l. Don ,nd
oul ivstion Of said land. viz: Jacob Allinr.
Alison Casey. Edward Brotherton, 3. p.
Brown. all OF Colby, K.nsHs.
A.. l. PArcnIx. Register
&C. Reynolds. 9l3sjya3
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION No Sss.
Land of'ce at oeerlin, kan.ss.
So,,ce :. he,.,x v,vo, d.. June tas ;asid. " ISS
named settler has died nots,e OF his intento1
to male nnal proof in support Of his claim,
snd that aid p.oof viii b made before
the Register ana aecciver at Oberiiu. kans-
as, on Sept. 8. 1Ses, viz: J. w. Irwin; for the
i:e OR section - town > south range ia west
Andrew s. 1leland having ID S on sane
land is uotlaSd tnat unless be appears Ut tnt,
sainc time his d. 8. win - cssEceied-He
pan.es the following witnesoes to prove his !
coufiuuCus resi- rc;,cc upon aud cultivation
Of pefd land, viz: 4 T. ynre1ne, koUcrt Jsr<
dn1e. u stEentor. kAns. y. Bssxs szna ,. n /
= L fArcnrx. Rnef-ter.
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
NOTlCE so. AGO.

L. S. Land GfEce. wa-Keeney. Kansas.
July s. lSSs.
Complaint having been entered at this OfYico
by Duncan McEwen against william 4. Barr
for failure tO comply with law rs to timber c,ll-
ture entry No. 3sfi. dated June 6, 1872 upon
the sw or rec =, town II south. range * west,
the cancc;a,iCn OF said entry: contestant nj.
leging that the said william a. Barr has failed to
break or plnw or cause to be broken plOwcd
any part whatever of said land mt any time
since date of entry and has failed to plant or
cause ro be planted any part whatever of said
hand To 10 trees. seeds or cuttings, or to cult
vate any I..:: thereof since date of entry.
The said parties are hereby summoned TO
appear at this Office on the I'D day of August
1885, at ] o'clock p. III. to respond and furnish
Testimony concerning said alleged failure.
B.J. +. HANNA. Register.
Osborn Monroe. l9-22jylG
Thomas County cat., 1885-07-23
NOTICE No llS.

L. S. Land Office, Wa-keeney. Kansas.
July =, 1855.
Complaint having been entered ut fhis Office
by Jennie McEwen against William Mckee for
failure to comply with law as TO timber culture
entry no. 1851, dated may g. 1879, upon the G h
sw Qr, and W h ~ or sec l. town II south.
range IS west, in st. John county. Kansas. with
q view to the cancellation Of said entry. con-
testant alleging that the said Vim. W. Mckee
has failed to break or plOw or canse to he hrok-
ell or plOwed any part of said hand since date Of
entry and has failed to plant or cause to be
planted to trees, seeds or cuttings any part
whatever Of said hand. or to cultivate any part
thereof since date of entry.
The said parties are hereby summoned to ap-
pear at this Office on the I'D day of August,
1855. at O'Clock p. IN To respond ard furnish
testimony concerning said alleged failure.
B. J. r. HANNA, Register.
Osborn & Monroe. lI2jyl6