davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Tricks of San Francisco Tramps
from the San Francisco Alta


A tramp epidemic of a new order has
broken out in the western addition, a
region lately the scene of some auda-
cious daylight burglaries. Thefashion
of those fellows is not the bullying
method of the country, nor yet the
whining, half-starved-to-d dodge,
which is the plan of only the non-in-
genious beggar Here is a sample:
The bell rings, and the lady of the
| house is informed that a gentleman
wishes to speak to her.
| els he peddler 2"
mo ma'am, he has not a sack. He
is nicely dressed, and does not look
like a began"
The lady has speech with the visitor
In the hall. He is very polite, hopes
he has not disturbed her, and is not
taking up her valuable time, but the
fact is Ia half sob) his little child is
| lying dead, and the hard-hearted I'M
| dertaker refuses to proceed with the
! funeral (sob) unless the money for the
coffin is paid in advance. "Surely, "
thinks the lady, "this grief is genuine, y
and produces the necessary dollar.
The stranger thanks her in a dumb,
half-hearted wayne is too cast down
to be effusively grateful-and departs
for the next well-appearing house to
levy similar tax. This is the most
successful dodge of the day, and the
contribution demand never exceeds
81. Another is the dashing, auda-
ciously benevolent swindle, and is
carried on thus: A merry, vivacious
party asks for the master of the house.
He does not prefix the mister 1t is:
''Is Smith in?-no, SO sorry, but per-
haps Mrs. Smith would do" The
lady appeared, and the visitor ratified
on in bluff, hearty way:
'Fact is, mas am, / am out on a col
Letting tour for poor fellow who was
once a well-to-do boOk-keeper on our
street, Front Street. Your husband
knows him we'll Worked in a store
adjoining my friend Smiths. Now,
here is the list: Jones, Williams, Jack
son, So and $3.50. You would save
me long tramp if you only act as
your husbands almoner, and let me
put Smith down for a couple Of dol
lars" There is no guile about this.
Benevolence oozes from every pore of
the philanthropist's body and in eight
cases out ten the So is handed out,
and Smiths name duly entered on the
list of benefaction. But the donor is
also made an unconscious accomplice
of the swindle.
"Who lives in that handsome house
across the way, ma am? Thompson;
ah, yes. What is his business? Dry
goods on Kearney Street. Oh, I know
him." and the collector trips nimbly
across to Thompson. He knows all
about Thompson now; he has just left
Smith. Hereis his shame. Mrs. Smith
gave him $2for that distressed family
Surely the wife of his old friend
Thompson can do no less, but Mrs.
Thompson, not to be outdone by Mrs.
Smith, sees her 50 and goes Is better.
In this manner the rascal works the
entire block, and the genuineness of
the names on the list makes the
swindle complete. 1t is only the first
step that costs, because he insists up
on each person writing theirnames up
on the list.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
In Time Of Peace Prepare.
From the Philadelphia Times. !


The old man rested his hand on the
anvil and looked about the shop that
employs many people manufacturing
implements of war, and said; Glow
curious it is that after the conflict be-
tween the sections the preparations
for war do not cease. Out here at the
Schuylkill arsenal we manufacture
100000 rounds of ammunition
and 100000 rifle balls each year. F."
"What do you do with it all"
'"Three millions are used for target
practice by the rank and file of the
army. The other is kept for reserve
or used in testing arms. So much
each day is used to test the character
of the work produced. The pressure,
carrying power, and the quality of the
arms used are tested every day Then
new guns are being sent out to betest-
ed, and thousands of rounds of am
munition are used in these expert
ments for war. The arsenal here at
Philadelphia is the only one where
ammunition is made in large quanti-
ties for the government. It's opera
tions are peculiar and it's machinery a
study. In these hours of peace few
people can comprehend how much is
being done in the way of testing the
implements of defense"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
"WHERE is CONRAD ?"
BY WILL CARLETON.


.sYou will tell me where is Jonrad?" said an old
man, bent and gray,
Where the flames were wildly dancing and the
walls were giving way. .nr,#t
II hat heard someone was buried-underneath
The ruins fell;
He was in the topmost story-ach, mein Gottl
Hove him well!'
Il will tell you how you knew him; he had full
and laughing eye,
And his face was smooth and Smll1ng-and he
was too young to die.
Hair he had like clouds at sunset, when an
And luf him-how 1 luf him and he is mine
only son.
you did see;
And all each money gif you, such as L could
bring with me.
''Young he was when we did bring him from the
Rhineland here to be;
l did lif for her and Conrad-she did lif for him
and me.
"Other ones we bring not with u.s. Colt, he
says, these more be mine;
And we left them all a sleeping 'mong the vine
yards of the Rhine
He hat not cross word gif us-he hat love us
every day;
And if he tonight comes home not, tbs the first
night he's away.
t'Let me to that fire, policeman | care what
for walls or brand?
Maybe he in there be iving-reaching for his
fathers hand!
Let me there, 1 say, policeman! hat work
there to be done!
Let go me or 1 viii strike you'll Is it that you
hat no SOnl'
Still the flames were like a furnace, and the
walls were crashing loud,
And the old man, held in safety, tainted mid
the trembling crowd.
And the mother watched and wondered, with
her great eyes scarcely wet;
And, half dazed amid her sorrow, waits for
Conrad even yet.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
The Preventive of a Terrible Disease.

No disorders, excepting the most deadly forms
of lung disease, involve such tremendous de-
struction of organic tissue those which fasten
upon the kidneys. Such maladies. when they
become chronc-and none are so liable to
assume that phase-completely wreck the sys-
tenn To prevent this terrible disease, recourse
should be had, upon the first manifestation Of
trouble, to Hostetter's Stomach Bitters. which
experience has proved to be highly effective as a
means Of imparting tone and regularity to the
of this medicine, naturally consequent upon it's
diuretic action, is the elimination from the blood
creasing the activity of the kidneys, It augments
the depurative efficiency of these organs, which
are most important outlets for the escape Of
such impurities.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

STRANGER, to waiter at the hotel:
Here l have made a slit in one of my
boots. Send it to the shoemaker and
ask him to stitch it up" An hour
after. Errand boy to porter: Here's
a stitched boot for No. 6; cost pen
n.y." Porter to boots: "Here's a
stitched boot for No. 6; l had to pay
t1reepence; give me the money"
Boots, to waiter; "Here's a boot for
No 6; I've paid sixpence for mending
it; pay up" Waiter, to stranger:
Here's the mended boot; cost a
shilling; I paid it myself" Some time
later-Stranger to shoemaker: 81 say,
what did you charge for mending that
boot?" Shoemaker: Nothing. =
Tivnr0OOI CO11rjnr
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Why the Editor is Bald and Toothless.

From the New YORK Star.
''YOu may never have remarked that
literary men are apt to become tooth
less sooner than other people," said
a dentist to me yesterday. "The
phosphates which should go to renew
the hair and teeth, are consumed by
the brain with such rapidity that the
dentist and barber have to be called
into requisition by NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
frequently than by any other class
If, in addition to hard brainwork, I'M
varied by frequent periods of recrea-
ton and repose, the subject is a heavy
smoker or drinker, the decay is so
much the more pronounced.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
life N thu, a,.,s sewers

Is possible for short time to the robust,
but the aiority of refined persons would
prefer in Mediate death to existence in their
reeking atmosphere. How much more re-
voting to be in ones self a living sewer.
But til /, is actually the case with those in
whom 5he inactivity of the liver drives the
refuse natter of the body to escape through
the IL, lgs, breath, the pores, kidneys and
bladder. It is astonishing that life remains
in sucn dwelling. DR.. Pierce's Golden
Medic IL Discovery" restores normal purity
to ths system and renews the whole being.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

INDIG EsTIoN, dyspepsia, nervous prostra-
ton and all forms of general debility re-
lieved by taking MENsMAN's PERFORMED
BEEF Tonic, the only preparation OF bee
containing its entire nutritious properties
1t contains blood-making, force genera ting
and DEMONSTRATING properties; is invaluable
in all enfeebled conditions, whether the re-
suit of exhaustion, nervous prostration
overwork, or acute disease, particularly il
resulting from pulmonary complaints
Caswell, Hazard & Co., proprietors, New
York.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

II VIVIAN two g-grains of q-quinine
an four o-ounces of w-whisky," shiv-
cred man with malaria to the drug
clerk, "an' I'll take it n-now." Isn't
that rather small dose?" suggested
the clerk; ''you seem to have got it
bad" II DIDN'T know but w-what
it is. M-make it e-eight ounces OF
whisky, an I'll run therisk. "-Bufalo
Express.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
InnOrtant.

When you visit or leave New York city
save Baggage Expressage and Carriage Hire
and stop at the Grand Union Hotel
opposite Grand Central Depot; 600 elegant
rooms fitted up at cost of one million
dollars, reduced to 81 and upwards pei
day. European plan. Elevator. Restau
rant supplied with the best: Horse cabs
stage, and elevated railroad to all depots
Families can live better for less money at
the Grand Union than at an frst-class
hotel in the city.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

THE supreme court has decided, on
a case of appeal, that member OF
the Common Council is not competent
to serve on jury in a case where the
CITY is concerned as one Of the con
testants.-BOstOn Post.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

In this issue will be found the adj
vertisement of the Farm, Field and Stock
man. This journal has a very large circula-
ton; has been established over years; it
goes to the home OF the best people; ably
edited and printed on fine paper. Read
their announcement.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

JONES and jackson were gotl4, II, me
the other evening, and the newsbo VS.
were yelling about the tRussia England
war and all that sort of stuff .Do
you think there's going to be war ?"
asked Jones' "Ugh! WHAT" an
swered Jackson, rousing as if from a
reverie. do you think there's going
to be war;" EYES," he replied in a
thoughtful voice. "Why doyou think
SO ?" Because my wife told me this
morning that there wasn't lump OF
coal in the cellar and | must order
some, and | forgot all aboutit. "-Ner-
chant Traveller.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Worlds Of Good.

Probably no other woman in the World re-
ceives so many '1etters of thanks as Lydia
E. Pnkham, of Lynn, Mass. Mrs. B, OF
Enfield, N. H., says: Il will simply say that
your Vegetable Compound is all you recon-
mend it to be. 1t has done me Worlds of good. .
Another lady writes from Ottawa as follows:
II have just to-day bought the seventh bot
tie of your Vegetable Compound, have used
two boxes of Pills and several packages OF
your Sanative WASH and think it but right
to tell you how much good / derived from
your medicines. They are q regular GOd-send
All the pains and aches have almost disap,
peared, my stomach is much stronger, too,
and l feel myself improved every way"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

= ROCHESTER, June l. 1882. 'Ten
1ears ago was attacked with the most
intense and deathly pains inmy back and
Extending to the end of my toes and to
my brain
(Which made me delirious!
From agonyl!ll
1T took three men to hold me on nv
bed at times
The Doctors tried in vain to relieve me
but to no purpose.
Morphine and other opiates!
Had no effect
"After two months l was given ur
die III!
sfWhen my wife
heard q neighbor tell what Hop Bitters had
done for her, she at once got and gave me
some. The first dose eased my brain and
seemed to go hunting through my system
for the pain
The second dose eased me so much that 1
slept two hours, something 1 had not done for
two months. Before / had used five bottles, l
was well and at work as hard as any man could
for over three weeks; but worked too hard for
my strength, and taking a hard cold, l was
taken with the most acute and painful rheuIna-
tism all through my system that ever was
known.
II called the doctors again, and after several
weeks they left me a cripple on crutches for life
case, and he said Hop Bitters had cured him
and would cure me- l poohed at him, but he
was SO earnest was induced to use them again.
In less than four weeks I threw away my
crutches and went to work lightly and kept
using the bitters for five weeks, until became
as well as any man living and have been so for
six years since.
1t has also cured my wife, who had been
sick for years; and has kept her and my
children well and healthy with from two to
three bottles per year. There is no need to
be sick at all if these bitters are used.
j. j. BERK. Ex-Supervisor.
That poor invalid wife, Sister, Mother
''Or daughter Ill
"Can be made the picture of health!
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
The Exquisite Pleasures Afforded by
Family Reunions.

In this broad land, teeming with a
wealth OF natural resources and advan-
tages, there's lamentable tendency for
families to become widely separated as
its members arrive at maturity. 1t ire
quently occurs that a mother must
travel a thousand miles or more in order
to visit her several children and their
families. The exquisite pleasure af-
forded by q family reunion is, alas! too
seldom enjoyed Not always is it con
venient for sons and daughters to leave
their homes and little ones to gather
around the old hearthstone Would
that the custom could more frequently
be INDUCED in. On many occasions i'll
ness in a family is a restraining cause
Too often the monster disease enters
an otherwise happy home, despoiling
parent, affecting child. Our duty to
ourselves and to our little ones demands
thatwe make good health the one grand
study and object of our lives. A ter
rible master is disease, Unsuitable and
unrelenting. AT first with deceptive,
alluring ways he gains a foothold, while
his victim murmurs sit is nothing only
a little pain, only a feeling of WEAKNESS,
Onfy SLSRU dISOfQef, until eventually
disease assumes complete control.
Fight the monster in the start meet
him at his first approach! by using
DIR. GUYSOTT'S YELLOW
DOCK AND SARSAPARILLA.
1t will make you feel fresh, the blood
will be made pure and circulate with
more vim. Sores and pimples will dis
appear; the urinary and digestive or
gans will gain strength, and perform
their functions without pain, while ro-
bust health, strength, freedom from
aches, etc., and happy content be the
result, and longevity your reward.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Worth Knowing.

The worst scald or burn can be cured
without a scar if Coles Carbolisalve is
promptly used. Sold by Druggists at 25
and so cents.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Valuable and Convenient.

Browns BRONCHIAL TRoCHEs are safe
and sure remedy for Bronchitis, Coughs,
and other troubles of the Throat and
Lungs. Sold only in boxes. Price 20
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

THE New York Legislature has
passed a bill to regulate the height OF
buildings according to the width OF the
street. No building is to be allowed
more than eighty feet high.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Prosecute the SwindlerS!ii

If when you call for Hop Bitters see green cIus-
ter of Hops on the white LABEL the druggist
hands out any stuff called G. D. Warmers Ger
Hop Bitters with other Hop name,
refuse it and shun that druggist as you would a
viper, and if he has taken your money for the
stuff indict him for the fraud and sue him for
the damages for the swindle and we will reward
YOU literally for the conviction.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
HER face SO fair, as flesh it seemed not,

"HER face so fair. as flesh it seemed not
But heavenly portrait of bright angels hue,
Clear as the sky, withouta blame or blot,
Through goodly mixture of compilations
due,
And in her cheeks the vermei red did show"
This is the poets description of a woman
whose physical system was in a perfectly
sound and healthy state, with every func-
ton acting properly, and is the enviable
condition of it's fair patrons produced by
DR.. Pierce's " Favorite Prescription" Any
druggist,
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
Throw AWAY Trusses

And employ the radical, new method, guar
anteed to permanently cure the worst cases
OF rupture. Send two letter stamps for
references pamphlet and terms. Worlds
Dispensary Medical Association, 663 Main
Street, Buffalo, n Y.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
The Russian Soldier.

The Russian soldier In the field is a
man of many virtues. At home In
peace, indeed, he has but one vice to
speak of. He will get drunk when he
can and keep drunk as long as he can.
He is docile by nature, and he obeys
his officer, whom, indeed, he addresses
as "little father" as if he were a child.
He is contented in hardship, heat
takes no effect on him, and he has be-
come well Injured to cold. His weakest
point in campaigning is his susceptibil-
ity to homesickness, of which malady
thousands of soldiers actually died
while the Russian army was lying be-
fore Constantinople waiting for the
ratification of the treaty of Berlin.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
LIVER AND KIDNEY

TROUBLES THEY CURE DYSPEPSIA
INDIGESTION, RHEUMATISM, AND ALL
URINARY TROUBLES. THEY lNVlGO-
RATE. NOURISH, STRENGTHEN AND
QUIET THE NERVOUS SYSTEM.
AS A TONIC THEY HAVE NO EQUAL.
THEY ARE A RATIONAL CkTHARTlC AND
A SUPERB ANTl-BlLlOUS SPECIFIC.
CAUTION SHOULD BE EXERCISED
BY PERSONS WHEN PURCHASING HOPS
AND MALT BlTTERS DO NOT GET THEM
COMPOUNDED WITH INFERIOR ARTl-
Giles OF A SIMILAR NAME. FOR SALE
BY ALL DRUGGISTS AND DEALERS. SEE
THAT EVERY LABEL BEARS THE NAME
HOPS & MALT BITTERS COM PANY,
DETROIT, MICH
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

THAT poor invalid wife, Sister, Mother
'Or daughter i! y
"Can be made the picture of health!
with few bottles of Hop Bitters!
CIVIL Won let them suffer! ~
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
HOPS AND MALT BlTTERS,

THE GREAT BLOOD PURIFIER, CON-
POUNDED FROM THE WELL-KNOWN
CURATIVES, HOPS, MALT, BUCHU, MAN
DRAKE, DANDELION, sARsAPARlLLA, CAS-
CARA SAGRADA, ETC. THEY ARE NEVER
KNOWN TO FAIL IN ALL CASES OF
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03
ARE YOU DISCOURAGED?

HAS YOUR PHYSICIAN FAILED TO AR
REST THE DISEASE FROM WHICH YOU
ARE SUFFERING? ARE YOU LOSING
FAITH IN MEDICINES, AND GROWING
ALARMED AT YOUR CONDITION. IF
SO, TAKE
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1885-06-03

jbS--z5 Cents, 5U Cents and SIUU Fer Bot
H9- Sold by all Druggists. @AA
Morning journal and courier., 1885-08-18
THE RACE AT NEW BEDFORD.

The Yachts Louise end vixen of
 the New Haven Yacht G1ub Win-
 neFs In ThsiF 6isss=A Pretty GeHs
 test=The New Haven Heats or
 Fer Eaesass
 NEW BEDFORD, Aug. f7-Te=day took place 6 pretty contest between some Of ths yachts of the New Haven Yacht club and those of the New Bedford Yacht club for q purse offered by oemmederes Hathaway and Parker, The contest was for second and third class sloop yachts and the course was from Clarks Point around Hen and Chick ems lightship, thence to Hsrsehel's Rock and back, distance of twenty-six miles. The wind was from the southwest. The entries were;
 Second class-Nimpoy, F. Soule Flight, H. Hathaway; Peri, F. P. Sands; White Cap, J. N. Forbes Gall of New Bedford), and the Rajah, Commodore James G. Beecher, and the Happy Thought, G. M. Graves, New Haven.
 Third class-Starling, G. W. Parker; Mo- mad, Fred Swift of New Bedford; Louise, T. M. Hall; Vixen, Allan Seaman and O. W. Rawson, New Haven.
 Shortly after Il o'clock the starting gun was fired and the Happy Thought of the New Haven club and the Nimpoy of the New Bedford club passed over the line to- gether off Fort Tabor and began beating to the windward. The Peri of the New Bedford club went over next, followed in order by the Louise, Startling, Vixen, Flight, Rajah, White Cap and Nomad, all the boats having crossed the line in less than eight minutes on the start. The actual time of starting for the various crafts was as fol- lows:
Morning journal and courier., 1885-08-18

ars sent from the almsheuss, and the work done is under the supervision of the aims house management.
 Other facts learned of more or less interest were thesei That since the town has as= stunned the cars of the city garbage the ser= vice has increased twenty five per cent. The burial of ths almsheHse aHd outside poor av= sfages about five persons per month, Since the enlargement of ths insane asylum at MiddleteWh the almsheHse has been greatly relieved Of class of insane poor that could not properly bs cared for at this institution. That general good health prevails at the aims house, the only eases of sickness at present being chronic in their character. Since the purchase of the 6pringside farm no money has been expended for improvements at the old farm because of the anticipated removal in the near future to the new locality. With this in view, it is the duty of the Selectmen to convert the land adjacent to the almshouse into meadow and grass land.
 One matter worthy of special notice is this: On Sunday last gentleman of wealth, who has been confined to his room for many months from illness, ordered sent to the almshouse ice cream and cake sufficient for two hundred and twenty persons. This is the second time this summer that he has performed this act of charity. His generosi- ty is very much appreciated by the manage ment and the poor inmates who call down blessings on the head of their unknown friend. It is an example that other well disposed persons might follow with the as- surance that they had afforded momentary pleasure and comfort at least to the unfortu- nate and deserving poor.
Morning journal and courier., 1885-08-18
LOCAL NEWS.
Brief Mention.


 Mrs. Esther Hart, of Plainville, died Sun day evening, aged seventy-nine.
 Southington people are talking ofs having a fire alarm system at cost of $500.
 The legal and other friends of Lawyer James A. Wood talk of giving him a com plimentary dinner soon, before he leaves for his new home in Florida.
 Lieutencnt Howard, of Gatling gun note, left for Canada yesterday. He returns and takes on his gun platoon of the Second regi- ment about September f2th.
 The funeral of Dennis Howard, aged twen- ty-six, who was drowned in Mill river Sun day while in bathing, takes place to-day from St. Francis church, Fair Haven.
 Those who wish good accommodations at Saratoga at reasonable prices will obtain them in advance by addressing MT. c. R. Knapp, Continental Hotel, Saratoga Springs, N. Y.
 c. 0. Bennett of North Ferry street, mas ter of the Order of the Inspirati, announces that an institute of the order will be held at Old Orchard Beach, Maine, commencing Au- gust 25th.
 Roger w. Cook, who died on Saturday ill Waterbury, was insured in the endowment rank, K. of F., of that city, for 5000. His is the first death which has occurred since the rank was organized there.