davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
, 1885-10-20

Psychologists. after patient aud close In
quiry, have arrived at the important and
practical conclusion that the power Of tho
entire man, his vitality, is as much ex.
pcudcd by two hours Of deep mental effort
n by a whole day Of bodily labor. THUS
fact seems TO bc founded on observed
physiological laws, hence. the man DO
q ends -four hours in the twenty. four In
earnest mcutal labor goes TO the utmost
alio wablO limit for a days work.
, 1885-10-20

Save money and doctor bills. Kelley,
your mothers. wives and sisters BY the
timely purchase Of DR.. B~osanko's Cough
aud Lung syrup, best known remedy iol
coughs, colds, Group and bronchial affec.
tions. Relieves children of Group in on,
night, may save you hundreds Of dollars.
Price so cents and sl.00 Sold by W. N.
HINT
, 1885-10-20

TO all who are suffering from crron
and indiscretions Of youth, nervous weak
ness, early decay, loss of manhood, &c,
will send q receipt that will cure you
FREE OF CHARGE. This greRI
remedy was discovered by a missionary il
South America Send self addressed
envelope to Rev. Joseph T. lnman.
Station ID. New York.
, 1885-10-20
on the Safety Ltmp's Principle.
TExchanre.1

A western inventor proposes to r
round oil tanks with several thicknesses
Of wire gauze to protect them from
lightning. lie also thinks that a few
sheets of the gauze a yard or two wide
run hastily in the shape Of a dam across
a creek or river aiame with oil would
prevent damage below it, because the
oil would pass though and leave the
flame behind.
, 1885-10-20

Persons desiring pure lake Mahapaluta
ice should leave orders at Christ Mauss'
baker, SIT Ferguson street, or with the
undersigned. SLOAN 4 Co.
, 1885-10-20

English anglers are greatly exercised
YER the recent importation Of some
american catfish which have been
placed in English waters. 1t is feared
thcy will eXterminate the native fish
, 1885-10-20

The fees which each new recipient of
tho Order Of the Garter pays amount to
nearly s., 900.
, 1885-10-20
CURE ron PILES

Louis kossuth is living in the Lanzo
valley at the foot OF the Savoy Alps.
, 1885-10-20

Hardware, stoves and unware, at Arp
4 Couway's.
, 1885-10-20

Iesal blanks at lhc Leader of6oe
, 1885-10-20

Job printing neatly aud
promptly eTecssfed ar The
Leader Job Rooms.
, 1885-10-20
THE PAPER FOR THE people,

Daily, 4 pageE, per year in advance : $40. 90
Weekly, IL pages, per yearin advance ESQ
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

Honse newly rehtted and refurnishsd. Ey.
erythine done to make guests comfortable.
Ratesm0derafe tr0nage respectfully soliei-
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
New Dodge.

Il beg your pardon, said siouchily
dressed individual, reaching for burr
which adhered to the coat sleeve of a
gentleman just ahead of him there's a
burr on your coat, sir; permit me to re-
move it. THANK you, no consequence,
said the gentleman, himself removing
the burr. The impecunious one struck
an attitude, told the regulation story
of hunger. and preferred request for
10 cents with which to buy bread. He
got the money but still fingered. what
is it, my man p asked the gentleman.
'Please, SIR replied the tramp, you
haye my burr in your hand. I'd like
it, If you please. It's my capital you
know r your capital p Yes, my
capital; you see, sticks it into cove
what locke downy you know. and then
I steps up and takes it off. Sometimes
I only get thanks for my trouble, and
sometimes don't get that much and
then some OF them comes down hand
some. Yes, boss, that's my capital !;
couldn't do business without it haye
to shut up shop, you know
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
No Time for That.

yes, the artificial banks along this
river made capital breastworks for the
Confederates, said the pilot, as we
steamed down the mighty Mississippi.
safely sheltered by the heavy walls OF
earth, I've had more'n one crack at a
Yankee gunboat myself
Then you were in the service p
Must have been. I belonged to a
sort o. independent troop, and most of
our fighting was from these 'erc banks.
Do you see that grove away off up
there p
Yes
sWell, in war times big house stood
there. Fifty of us were eating dinner
there one day when somebody saw a
Yankee gunboat along about here. We
all rushed for the bank, and when she
came along we opened with our musk
cts. BY and by she replied with shell
from big gun. 1t struck the bank
near the top and jist lifted about ten
wagon loads of dirt up in heap and
let it tall on our captain
Kill him p
mo, reckon not, but it buried him
clear out of sight.
How did he feel when you got him
out p
We didn't git him out.
you didn't Why not y
TOO busy holding All election for
some one to take his place. We couldn't
think of everything at once, you know,
and then it was such cheap and easy
way of burylng man. They might
have dug him out since the war, but ]
reckon he was no good. Been there
too long.'-FTee Press.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
Nomination by Washington
Rejected.

The question Of the probable action
of the Senate in regard to the nomina.
tions of the President recalls the first
instance of the rejection of a nomina-
ton by the Senate. Benjamin Fish
bourne as naval officer at Savannah.
Washington, while promptly substitute
ing another name, sent respectful re.
monstrance to the Senate, showing a
painful consciousness Of what he con-
sidered to be a reflection cast upon his
Judgment or his motives. He said
that he did not doubt the reason for
rejection seemed to the Senate to be
ample, but he submitted whether,
when the propriety of a nomination
appeared to be questionable, it might
not be expedient to ask the reasons.
He proceeded at once to state the
grounds upon which he made the
nomination, which were entirely
conclusive. Washington's statement
was so impressive that the Senate
Immediately confirmed the nomination
of the substitute, and no other nomina-
tion of Washington's was ever reject
ted.
The only reason known for the refus
al of theSenate to confirm ColonelFish-
bourne, was the opposition of Senators
from Georgia, which was supposed to
be political, and of the kind which has
since become so familiar.-Harper' IS
Weekly.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

A certain Dutchnan, owner OF o.
small house, had effected an insurance
on it of eight thousand dollars although
it had been built for much less. The
house got burned down and the Dutch
man then claimed the full amount FOR
which it had been insured; but the Off
GERS of the company refused TO pay
more than its actual value -about six
thousand dollars. He expressed his
dissatisfaction i'm powerful broken
English, interlarding his remarEssWith
some choice Tentonic oaths.
sIf you wish it. said the .actuary OF
the insurance company, we win build
you house larger and better than the
one burned down, ms we are positive IL
can be done for even less than SIX
thousand dollars
To this proposition the Dutchman
objected, and at last was compelled to
take the six thousand dollars. Some
weeks after he had received the money
he was called upon by the same agent,
who wanted him to take out policy OF
life insurance on himself or on his
wife.
sIf insure your wife's life for four
thousand dollars the agent said, sand
she should dle,You would have the sum
to solace your heart
You 'surance fellows is all t'iefs /
said the Dutchman. sIf I insure my
wife, and my wife dies. and if Ig0es to
the office to get my four thousand dol
lars, do gets all de money 7 No, not
quite. You viii say to me, 'ohe wasn't
vert four thousand dollars; she was
vert bout one thousand dollars. III You
don't like de one Thousand dollars. wa
will give you a bigger and better Yife +
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15


Wanting to buy a few precious stones
to distribute among my friends before
get my life insured and GO tn the Sea-
side,I interviewed diamond merchant
down town, and while we we're compar-
ing the gems the conversation turned
upon the difficulty OF indentifying dia-
monds. Some people assert that they
can recognize certain stone as accu-
rately as other people can recognize "a
certain man. You take your diamonds
to be cleaned or reset and you are sure
that you receive the same stones again,
although others less valuable, OK even
paste limitations, may have been subStI-
tuted. But the experts are sure that
they can meyer be deceived unless the
stone has been recuit. Upon this point
the diamond merchant told me a good
story /:
One day another firm i'm the same
business -call it Smith ~ Jones--sent
him diamond, which was very tine
and very cheap. 1t was set in a ring,
SO tia. he could mob weigh it; but after
examining it carefully he concluded
that its cheapness must be caused NV
some defect, aud no Lie returned it tO
the owners. Tbs next week an agent
called with another fine, cheap stone.
which my friend concluded to purchase.
Before binding the bargain he thought
he would take 1t over to Smith & Jones
and see what they said about it. They
praised it enthusiastically. Why. it's
a bargain y cried Smith. and 80 my
friend bought the diamond.
Aha = said Jones. when they met
the next day, you did buy our stone
after all. and you paid $50 more for 1t
than we asked for it originally
This was gall and wormwood. My
friend hurried back to his Office and
looked at the diamond. Sure enough,
it was the stone that Smith q Jones
had sent to him. The clever firm hal
anglcd for him through mn agent and
caught him nicelJ. He matched the
diamond, lad pair Of earrings made
and bided his time.
At last he gave the earrings and hi
price to an agent and sent him out to
sell them. The agent came lback and
said: smith IL Jones want nnA of
these stones. viii you split the pair "
Yes said the diamond merchant,
sell them this one,' and he took one OF
the stones out Of its settings the price
is 10 much carat, AZ the color is very
| fine.'
When the agent returned with the
check my friend sat down and wrote
Smith & Jones the following note
Quits You have bought pack your
own stone and given me S97 profit. X
prefer Pommery Sec.
It was a case OF diamond cut dia-
mond and it confirmed my doubts AZ to
the possibility Of identifying unse
stones.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
MILLHEIM Pa THURSDAY OCTOBER 15, 1885.

the time the ladies returned from the
supper room l was presentable, though
feeling rather weak in The joints, !
must confess.
Ned had promised secrecy upon his
honor, but his black eyes did twinkle
when Miss Fanny asked how / had en-
joyed myself since our arrivals at which
| blushed so excessively that knew she
thought me fool | confess that it
took me some days to recover from the
effects of that afternoon but Fanny's
sweet face, and my ardent love for her,
drove all unpleasant impressions away
at last.
She is my wife now ; and, for the
benefit of my bachelor friends, and lest
they should reel alarmed at some parts
of my story, l will say that all that a.
bout the bones, skeletons. rats, etc,
wasn't what I thonght at all in fact.
it was nothing terrible, and If they
want to feel sure Of 1t, l would advise
them to get just such wife as l have
and then you will soon understand all
about il.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
A Foolish Father.

'My dear,' said rich father to his
only daughter, very fashionable girl,
you are about to be married and want
to talk to you seriously
Yes, papa,' she said, sitting herself
on his knee.
/ George is very worthy young man
and abundantly able to take care OF
you; but this is very uncertain world.
Misfortunes may come when we least
expect them and it behOoves us at all
times to be ready to Fm'eet them with u
brave, cheerful heart. If, through some
chance, your husband should loose his
fortune and be reduced to very humble
circumstances, do you think that you
could accept the new order of things
and help him as true wife should p
How can you ask such question,
you foolish pa, when you know how I
adore GeorgeY'
This is all very well, the old man
continued; but could you, educated to
life of luxury, as you haye been. reso-
lutely put aside the past and devote
yourself to household duties, such as
cooking, and mending,and-and sweep
ing, and all that sort of things p
What foolish, silly papa you are, to
be sure,' replied the girl, playfully tap
ping the bald spot on his head, 'and
how ridiculously you talk. Why, the
servants would attend to all those mat
terS.'
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
& Great Practlcal Joker.

Hack Knober, editor of the Weekh
Ker Slosh, humorous paper, itches
for prominent place among the testers
of America. His marked paragraphs
having failed to produce sensation,
and his long articles haying been de-
clared to be as dismal as the screak of
a wooden hinge, he decided upon maxi
ing'some new attempt.
Il notice. he unused, one evening,
that tho best humoris:s in the past
were practical jokers. John Phoenix
and Artemus Ward made their greatest
hits in this way. Now, IL get up a
joke on some teller who travels around
some drummer who would come around,
and tell it-l would soon have nation
al reputation
Hack was soon afforded an Opportu-
nifty of enforcing this determination.
One night at the village hotel he notic-
ed nervous fellow who travelled for q
shoe house.
That's my man, unused Hack, I'll
have him standing on his head tonight.
How do you do ?-addressing The drum
| mer.
so. so. What sort of place is this
you've got here I? Just now, while
standing out there, q dog came up, and
1T was all l could do to keep him off
me-
Must haye been mad dog replied
Hack. Good many of them i'm the
neighborhood.
We'll. that lets me out. shall leave
here in the morning.
Hack inquired the number of the
drummer's room, and late In the even-
ing slipped I'm aud got under the bed.
The drummer came i'm after awhile
and sat down on the edge OF the bed.
Hack growled like dog.
Il hope,' said the drummer aloud,
'that | won't have another at tonight.
I'd better throw this pistol away, for
might kill somebody. No, blamed if
don't keep it, / wouldn't mind killing
a few such fellows as live in this town.
That fool editor ought to die.'
Hack did not growl.
lie ought to go this night. / feel
that thing coming on me. Believe I'll
sleep under the bed. Then, If any one
should come to kill me, they couldn't
find me-
I The sharp corners of Hacks bones
began to thump the floor.
Believe I'll shoot underthere coup
le of times
For Gods sake, hold OH Mister y ex-
claimed Hack crawling out. Il wasn't
doing anything II He made a break
for the door.
Who is that awful fellow p asked
Hack, when he reached the Office.
why, don't you know him p
No.
He's going to be your rlyal here in
business. He has bought the Ne,cs.
Saw him laughing just before he went
up. Said he was going to have some
| fun
Hack groaned.
said one of the boys was trying to
play joke on him. Said that he heard
that you were great practical joker.
Don't be in hurry. Told me that
when he got chance he was going to
write you up. Well, good night, old
boy
The weekly Ker Slosh" has sus-
pended. Hack works at a steamboat
landing. g.-Arkdnsa, Traveller.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
How Trees Pump Water.

Some idea of the necessity of presery-
ing our forests, in order to protect the
valleys from disastrous inundations
may be gathered from the fact that DIR.
j. M. Anders, in the official report of
the geological survey of Wisconsin says
that the average amount of water
pumped from the earth and exhaled by
soft. thin-leaved plants in clear wealth
er amounts to about one and one-fourth
ounce troy per day of twelve hours for
every square foot of surface. Hence,
says the doctor, "a moderate-sized elm
raises and throws off seven and three
fourths tons of water per day.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15
Mrs. Cuttles Surprise Party.

LAST Thursday was the annivers-
ary OF Mr.. Cuttle's marriage, and sc
his wife thought she would get up q
little surprise party for his benefit.
She went around the neighborhood
with great secrecy and invited all the
neighbors, together with certain OF
her husbands business friends, and
laid out programme of refreshments
well calculated to please. Everybody
was to meet at the house at nine o.
clock sharp, and give Mr. Cutie such
surprise when he came home
as would start the filling in his back
teeth. But it fell out that Mr. Cutie
had got hold of bad headache that
day, and, contrary to custom, he came
home at seven o'clock. His wife was
out in the shed at the time, concocting
the low-necked ice-cream, and, not
finding her, Mr.. Cutie went directly to
bed and was sleeping as sound as a
bank watchman; and two hours later
when the guests arrived, he was sche-
duled for an all-night run, and no
stops at way stations. And all
innocently the merry, merry guests
filed in, speaking in hushed whispers
and treading on each others dresses,
and were shown into the darkened par
lor, in order to jump out when Mr..
Cutie should arrive, and thus make
the surprise absolutely perfect. AID
there they stayed and stayed and
stayed and stayed for three never
ending hours, while Mrs. Cutie kept
wondering wherever her husband
could be, and running to the door to
look for him, and crying, till little
man in O red necktie, who was tired of
having fat woman standing on his
feet, wanted to know rather sarcastic
ally if it wouldn't be a good idea, just
by way of variety, to play something
else. Then Mrs. Cutie went into her
bedroom to get fresh handkerchief to
cry into, and when she turned up the
gas and saw her husband sleeping
there so gently and sweetly and peace
fully, and with anything but an ex-
preston of surprise depicted on his
countenance, she went softly back to
where the guests were waiting, and
pointed out to them in a
calm and dispassionate way how
much better it would be to 60 home
quietly and say nothing about it.
Everybody else felt that way, too, and
even seemed anxious about it, while
the little man in the red necktie added
that while, for his part, he was probab-
ly as fond of surprise paaties as any
man alive, so far as his observations
extended it seemed to him in these
joyous occasions that it somehow made
O differance as to who was the party
surprised Rockldad Courier Gazette.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

There are no children any more.
The eleven year-old daughter of fash
ionable lady of Marshall, Texas, was
observed to be in very deep thought.
what are you thinking about, Ma
mie ?" asked her mother. "I was just
wondering whether me or Tommy
Jones ought to pay the expenses. "
"Wbat expenses ?" ''The travelling
expenses of our bridal tour. "--Ieca!
SJtsngs.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

It seems to be the ambition of young
wives to look well when any one calls
A young bride heard a ring at the
front door. The maid was out, and
she rushed up stairs to ''tidy" a little
before admitting the caller. There
was moment of lightning work before
the dressing table. Quicker than it
takes to tell it, ribbon was fastened
to her throat, a flower into her hair, q
flash of powder on her face, and she
was at the door-all smiles and blush
es. The gentleman" said he had the
cheapest clothes-props that could be
bought for the money.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

well, madam, how's your husband
to-day p why, doctor, he's no better ,
ibid you get the leeches p Yes, but
he, only took three of them raw--I had
to- fry the rest.'
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

The following is said TO be the way
to build up.a town and we think Id well
put:
Write about it.
Help to improve it.
Beautify the streets.
Patrcnize the merchants.
Advertise in the newspapers.
Elect good men to all the offices.
Pay your taxes without grumbllnS-
Be courteous TO strangers VINO come
among you.
Meyer let an opportunity to speak
word about it pass.
If you think of nothing good to say
about it say nothing bad.
Remember that every dollar you in
vest as a permanent improvement 1S
that much money at interest.
Never "kickn against any proposed
necessary improvement because it is
near your own door, for fear your taxes
will be raised fifteen cents.
Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1885-10-15

Tt is said that Daniel Webster could
never 60 through the streets OF Boston
without attracting attention. This
NAV be. Boston streets are fearfully
crooked, and Daniel was not teetota-
Ter.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1885-05-23

The artists who have been pursuing ga
Wild Goose Chase > along the shores of the
Baltic and through the pages of Ha,per's
Magazine, accomplish ''The Descent ~ in
the June issue, with some account of North
Jutland, a quaint German province near
Hamburg. This is called Vierlande ("Four-
lands y, the little province, of only
forty square miles, being composed of four
1'olde's, or lake-beds, separated from each
other and protected from the Elbe by great
dikes. The costumes and customs are old
fashioned and most curious, and the gener-
al stability is illustrated by the fact that
the principal inn at Bergedorf, the chief
town, has been kept by one family for two
hundred and fifty years. eff Garden of
Eden can exist in that latitude" says Mr..
Frank D. Millet, who writes the article,
"Vierlande certainly has superior claims
to that title.''
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1885-05-23
The SOufharn Rivouoc

From Louisville Courier-Journal, April II. I
B. +. Avery & Sons, publishers of Home and
Farm, have purchased Of tho Messrs McDon-
aid the Southern Birouoe and the June num-
ber much enlarged. will be the first of the new
series. The magazine will hereafter be under
the editorial charge of General Basil W. Duke
and Richard W. Knott. As formerly war
papers will be the special feature of the masa-
zine, but each number will have literary ar
ticles illustrating all phases of Southern life.
the purpose being to make it, in every sense, a
representative literary magazine.
The June number will contain brilliant ar
tlcle on the battle of Franklin, by Major D. W.
Saunders. accompanied by the first accurate
map of the battle field yet published. 1t will
also have an account of General John H. Nor
gan's escape from prison, to be followed by
full and authoritative statement of the mis-
sion of Jacob Thompson. 80 little understood
and SO grievously stsrepresented. Paul H.
Hayne will contribute to the first number an
article on " Southern War Lyrics" and Har-
rison Robertson characteristic poem. The
magazine is to be greatly enlarged and its
typographical appearance entirely changed