davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
RI-PLEAsE EEEP Orr rRs GRAss.

This shows that the moose is . bumorist
Near Pea Cove l saw a strange sight
A farmer was rowing around over bis crau-
berry orchard in a sk;T stood up on the
stone wall and watched him for some time,
because'Ia am greatly interested in farming
and dearly love to watch any n eise who
may be engaged in manual labor. 1t was
a long time before / could make out what
he was doing. At last, However, | figured
it out, and i was very much surprised, in.
deed, for 1 had never seer-horticulture car
riedto that extent. and as Mr.. Seward re.
marked. 81 thought he was carrying that
thing too far" -.
Many will doubt my word, and I would
not have believed it myself if any q else
had told me, but the nan was actually pick.
ing ~cranberries out ofhis submerged orchard
with a stomach pump. l have one Of the
cranbearries at home now.
Bill NYS.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28

In another enclosure . farmer planting
clover seed With shyperdermic syringe, and
covering It with Q mustard plaster. De
said that LIST year his clover was . CON.
plete failure because his mustard ptasters
were no good. BE had triedto save money
by using secondhand p~lasters, and Of course
the clover seed, missing The warm stimius,
neglected to rly, and The crop was a~fsilEre,
here may be noticed the canvas-bsck
moose and q strung suiPathy to good rum.
l do not wonder that the people Of Maine
are hostile TO rum-it they judge sl rum BY
Maine run. The moose is one of the most
gamey of the fnny Tribe. He is caught in
the fall of tie year with q double-barrel shot
gun and q pair OF snow shoes. BE does not
bite unless Initiated, but little boys should
not 90 near tie female moose while she is
on her nest. The masculine moose wears q
hare lip and hat rack on his head, to which
lie attached q picard, on which is printed:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
Acaoss joe cRIMsoN Glover SEAS

Acos the crimson ofoxer seas
hear The haunting hum Of bees
1eatrtAcd All the rich perfume
krom Jasmine aud magnOlia bloom,
E with his pallid, lev hands,
NhM Winter bound our northern lands:
10 spicy, pal~m-0mhOEerd isles,
Where ncVer-dying summer smiles,
Ny Spirit drifts sp0n The breeze
Across TIE SriDson clover sea&
And where the Gull Stream soily layes
kloridan eapes with loamy waves
Sc the bearded cypress boughs,
Like hoary hersitS, lift their byQWs
ai0st 70 greet RSky - clear
As any placid mountain mere;
And there the merry m~ock1ng-5irdS
Seemed nttering melodiouS words
Alas how son the vision tieeS
Acres the crimson clover seas!
The vision fades. All well a may;
For one who makes more bright the ivy
Down gTecning atSles Of tall gas trips,
A Song upon her lovely lips
As msrTy Is the thrush above,
-Out-tril Ing tunetal lays Of love;
And al my pulses Swifier stir,
And all my heart goes out 10 her,
The viii c she Straysin graceful ease
Aefoss the crimson clover Ses.
Clinton ScOllard in Boston Transcript.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28

ran through him. and he fsll heavily forward
at my feet
% my companion. who stopped and lifted
the dropping bead on TO his knee.
After one glance. he laid II gently down
again.
HE is dead" was his grave reply.
And with Vandeleur's death my story
ends, for after that night the sounds were
heard no more.
The forlorn little ghost WI at rest--Ths
ArposY.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
She Knew What Venus Did.
Sprinnfsld RepWblieaR.

They were discussing the probable position
If tie arms Of the Venus de Milo at a house
TN State street the other evening, when the
7.ytar-old girl, who had been thoughttully
eizinr at the statuette which had given rise
o TIE discussion, eagerly presented her the
CIV, a don't think that she was giving an
sFple or pulling a bow. | think she was
taking q bath"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
Habit and Appearance.

From he drqondnf.
distinguished clergyman Of Boston went
out TO a country town the other day to lee.
ture. He arrived early in the afternoon,
and all the town, Of course, spotted" him
within five minutes as a very great and very
sanity mar. He went into q drug store,
ard, in tones that froze the blood Of the
young clerk behind the counter, said: Young
-man-do-you-smoke2"
"Ye IS, sir," said the trembling clerk; I'm
sorry. but I learned the habit young, aud
havn't been able to quit it yet"
Then" said the great divine, without the
movement Of a muscle or the abatement Of
a shade Of the awful solemnity Of his voice,
"can you tell me where | a get a good
cigarY'
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
The. Congregation smiled Aloud.

At the dedication of Pilgrim Chapel the
State Sunday School Secretary was address
ing the children. Now l am going to di.
vide your school into three parts" said he.
There are the b. BIS; what are theyY'
Big boysl' was the ready response.
Good. Then there ardthe b. g.'s. What
are theyY'
big girls" shouted forty voices.
Right again. And last Of all, there are
the ]. c.'s."
Little kids!" exclaimed a shrill. voiced
urchin, without waiting for the question.
The congregation smiled vociterously.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
Nsu Ndk &M
where He Felt ~ Homo
phSkrSslnkta C1u.

PhSkIdePhN CdHs
Mr.. Tompkins Ito Manager snsPshOv,
who has just returned from Europe)-'Did
you have a pleasant tripr'
Snapshaw-"Oh, yes; bat Il wAs very
homesick until l reached Rome: lfeat oil
right there"
Tompkins-"How was thatf'
Snapshow-"Why, l spent two' days N
the Ca,acombs, and the collection OF dead
heads there made me feel as though wss
at home again
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
The Ameer and His Allies.

Pail MAI Gazette.
Abdur Rahm had some difficulty in I'M
Outstanding the complacency Of the English
in allowing the native Princes to have A.
mics of their own. He was told that they
were occasionally useful to us, and had, in
fact, taken part in the last Afghan wal.
"Ah! and were killed of that way" was
the Ameer's reply. NO." said his infor.
msnt; they kept our lines OF communicac.
ton open in the Kurrun Valley" Did
they? p l should have sent them whore
they might be thinned q little"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
DR.. J. E. SMITH
Ne. ilo< Chsplins Dtsss<
Mar Eonrtssntk a.

Ne. lAo< Chaplins DtrsA
Near FourtssuiA 10
In The only regularly educated physician sso
on the following diseasss In The stats Of Wa
ginia, and the best syidsnos Of his skill and 800
The testimony d hs patients. He ssva ~
flew out Of many hundred certificates In II -
zion. Many yosIy' expsrtsnoe In ths bst hst1
together Witha thorough medical sduottsa u
m{iiahty with therapeutto agents, . elos oesrI
Of temPsrmsnue peculia1us., snd :trtes s,.sna
&c. diseases which are frsquenty rEsrtas Il
able. In every instance d. Smith v1l frlakJ Z
the patient his opionon.
PROOF.
Consumption, Splitting BLOOD ~ he
gave up oil hops Of my recovery. NJ. JOIN
fured me two ysanAso. oso. psaag,
Consumption, Chronic Diarrhea, -
and Passing Blood-I vaa emadated 70 3 -
ton. Strength gone. d.. Smith cured nstss =
sso. MnL c. J. Nelson, HhcslinG '.
Cs.n ,a =. Psl,pIps s Of sS:: IL lG .:, e W. :.
to help me-. ] thought. my disssss insunba I
Smith cured me completely two ye.n \. NJ
Of speidel 4 Co, wbesilaG w
Cancer Of Breast-WM cut out TINS ussy|
phydcisnsL Dr. Smith CURED N. without ta ns|
~ - ~ 49,
To the Iadiss-Dr. Smith has . ms,bod do
ing falling Of the womb and female vcatpss -
cures 10 In Q short tina LAdia need suser % lnN
Female Weaknsss-Most agravsisd tisi N
one seemed 10 undsntand the oAse Of ny dsanI
Dr. smith cured her Q yeaf ago and sht u Dos =
and strong. Ma G. J. Nelson. WbeelinE W.
Fistuls In Ano, Pilss-Mosa aUnrs!d wi
given mp 70 die md p~ronounood i~pcuuabls
lack for eighteen veekL DR.. smith cured ~
weeks without the knifa. three ysan ego, nd 10
better health nov than ever.
Thos. Colyin, Grcosf, whsay
E1ts-My wiis had them Tor jean Could -
relief. Dr.. Smith cured hsf thres ysan 10 ~
s=crofrious Uicsr On Leg for YssnJ
Smith cured ne v yssn =; y,w..
Waller Grow, va
VDr. Smith win snQes 70 curs any os 49,
mattsr Of how long Standing, without IL IA
Without The lnst daneE Of any kind -
Loss of Manhood-DT. Smith h1 nsossC
atty Of Ills coAdiaon vhicg mp the founauS
health and rendsn miNnSls - many. hs-
msnt viii restore bath and strength In sss1.
Dr. Smiths rooms as oanangsd thst peuSssS
ine 70 - hin a. not coos n oontad W.
and his buhnan With lalin nd ssntisDo
HiooS Disordsr-nsss ustnns tss =
stroyer q nis nay consult d. snin vnp~
chart for ssls.Azaainatisnsetsrs.
n q disfanos 81 rsosiptei tvo y stAn.. n -
thns $1,000 n aIvsyJ guaranteed ntifsnNL -
T.Ssritsdon ~ n eAsa 0ho 49,
l.m.ts7R.a Z. aal5, szssgs sgn1sy;r
On - q cdirS1 BIZ J sai.A
HA. ltpl Qapnossy
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
A Sight Worth Seeing.

A lady raj walking along Main street
very rapidly. A gentleman "a walking
Just behind the lady at an equally rapid
pace. The lady saw a pin on the sidewalk,
and stopped suddenly to pick it up. The
gentleman failed to put down brakes and
took a header over the lady. Neither party
secure the pin.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
why Tilden Remained n Bachelor.

NeIr YORK. TslegTds.
One of his friends tells me that Mr.. Til.
den in past years had semi-occasional differ.
ences 10 his household, sometimes vulgsrly
called rows. After one Of these, Smith NJ.
Weed drove up in front Of Mr.. Tilden's
Gramercy Park house. Mr.. Tildon got In
with Mr.. Weed, to whom he presently re-
lated his troubles in despair. He capped the
climax by saying, o. he clapped his com.
panion en- the knee, by thunder, Wee1, I'd
get married if l wasn't afraid to-"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
In n Quandy.
DkI,5sB.bi1 IyN

fhtk1dophh CAas
Mr.. Highstriker. You are worriedi .
see, my dear, as to where we shall spend the
summer"
Mrs. Highstriker-"We'n spend itwhers
we did last year"
AT homer
ayes. The question which troubles meis
where shall we make the n~eighbors believe
we have gomez"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
A Grim Fact

A Grim Fact.
N. y. Sun.
After dinner yesterday:
Old Friend-You ought to be proud Of
your wife, Tom.
Host-Yes?
C. F.-She's a most brilliant talker.
Host-She ought to be.
o. FL could listen to her for q whole
night.
Host (wearily)-I often do.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
An American Girl Abroad.

Ar American Girl Abroad.
Gatigndmfs Messen9er.
Amer can Girl 10 cabman in P4risS
"Eue veus-etre vous-O Mary Cunning
TO her %cousin) What is the French for en-
gsgedT"
Mary-"Fiancee."
A. G.,(to cabmsn)-"Etre vous fnanceeY'
Cabmsn-"Ah. non, Mademoiselle, | have
zie wife Ell four children"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
AFuNNr COLUMN.
r..e. 81 ~H.sk-Hsrlo.

Force OF Habtt-Hsi1o.
BrssAs~ n
. waking up Broadway the Other
evening. AZ 1 passed . cigar store ! sas
an s~cru.inisn.e, whom l ssluted with the
aHeIIo.a ] heA I'd by my side in belllike
t,nea turned, sm prlsed, and saw {. young
isdy stop quickly aid look int . mnnne'y
rtore window, blushiny furio1s!y.
"Did you speak 70 me- his' AsA'd
politely. ,.,l and ..,rtsd
,sTbsts q Of the elephone exchange
girlsg% said my friend.
Hsr Hork ~
Somebody dead scross the wayf y.
ouired a travelling man Of his N e, Just aF
Ter comise in from Q trip ana noticing
crane on the door. "Yes," she ref uedi ~ ~
was nut out this morning WA nnr
Il don't know; Mra BIS husband ana nee
Dug dog were beth sick yesterday; but the
undertaken hasn't called yet, and l Q
know which of them died. don't think 1t
is her husband, though" why notn b
cause l saw her al the window . while tago;
and she was crying as Il her heart wouid
break
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
On What Strange Meats He Fed.

frdHE BtrktdhdS Dtdry.
"B. called; cooked q viper for luncheon;
to Weybridge; out fishing; cooked perch
and frog on shore; had some elephsnttrunk
soup. The trunk itself was boiled for days,
If not weeks, without being sensibly affected
by ibe process. A plentiful supply Of roast
giraffe appeared when the giraffe house at
the Geological Garden was burned, and
other deceased animals were occasionally
experimental on. Chops from . panther
two days under ground were, however. pro-
nounced not good.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
Bestsa Culture In the villa West.
CzSogzo Hrnid.

A Boston man rather crippled the from
tier notion the other night At the Columbia
Theater. BE went in accompanied By tvo
ladies. At the end of the 6rs oct he went
out and passed into an adjacent saloon. BE
drank his glass Of beer and bought two
more. BE started into the foyeg With the
beverage, and VA stopped at the dooe. of
course. BE was given 70 understand thu
the Columbia vas not . beer gAsdsa. BE
~apologized and offered The MAJ Ct TIE dool
one Of the glasses, which vas rsfussd 81
drank of both himself, put pat tia glasssl
down on the door. wiped his Eps, passed n
made hia apology 70 The lsdieS end q
through the play.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28
Recipe for Fashionable Ics-Crsam.

Boston TSaaArpt.
Il asked for strawberry cream" said the
lady, eyiDg the refreshment askance.
You've got II, mum" replied the waiter.
But what makes it look 30 paleT'
"Cochineafs riz mum-vay up-can't
afford TO make EN- pootier for the money"
Mercy" exclaimed the lady; you don't
mean to say that you color your strawberry
cream with cochineall At the fashionable
places where ! Am used TO going they never
use anything bat aniline die. hs expen.
iye, of course, bat then il il % lovelyf'
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28

TIC. M0FFAT & ca
No. ~ Twelfth Street.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1885-06-28

luOuEul luOcC OAO Vi III "SNN3 paw
his death warrant
What do you meanY
"Only a few days afterwsrd, Yandeleur
locked him up all night in a dark closet,
where he was found the next morning,
crouehing against the wall; his hands
clenched, his eyes fixed and staring-dead."
Good Heavens, how horrible! But no
word of this was mentioned at the in
quest?'
mo; and | did not hear of it myself till
long afterward, from a woman who had
been Yandeleur's housekeeper, but was too
much afraid Of him to betray him at the
time. From her, too, | learned BY what
refined cruelty the poor little lads nerves
had been shaken and his health under
mined. If the intention makes the deed,
James Ysndeleur was q murderer"
l was silent a moment, thinking, with an
uncomfortable thrill. of EthePs dream. Il
wish l had never entered this ill-omened
house" / exclaimed at length. Il dread
the effect of this revelation on my daugh'
tiers mind"
why need you tell herT' he questioned.
my advice is to say nothing more about it.
The n she forgets the subject the bet
ter. Send her away to the seaside; change
Of air and scene will soon efface it from her
memory"
BE rose as he spoke, and took up bis hat,
What has become of VsudeleurY' iu'
quired. Il have heard nothing Of him since
we paid the policy"
He has been living abroad, / believe
going to the dogs. no doubt. But he is In
England nov" the doctor added: or else il
was his fetch which l saw at your gate ths
other night"
AT our CATER l echoed in sstonishmsnt
What the deuce was be doing thereT'
He seemed to be watching the house. Il
wa last Sunday evening. / had been din
ing with friends at Richmond, and on my
way back, between III and IL o'clock, | no
ticed q man leaning over the gate of Tht
Cedars. On hearing footsteps be turned and
walked away bat not before / had caught
glimpse of his face in the moonlight"
"And you are sure il was her
almost certain-though he was greati,
altared for the worse. / have . presenti
mant dosyou know, that you viii see or hsal
~ him yourself before long" he sddeS
thOughtfally, as he shook hands and wen
IIost no time in following bis advice wit
-.eard 10 Ethel, whom I dispatched to Scar
horourk, in charge Of my married sister. I
Issd ssksa q hearty dislike 20 The csdsr'
Morning journal and courier., 1885-06-27
LIMITATIONS.

It is said that only one man in 8 thousand can whistle tune, but that man finds 999 innitators. Post.
 "A few boarders taken in for the summer is sign often seen, but very few seem to realize how much truth there is in it.-Bos- ton Post.
 It is no use talking about ''the pearly gates ajar" to boy who is wrestling with green cucumber and mans size colic.-Fall River Advance.
 A pistol ball in motion was photographed the other day, and the artist who accom- plished the feat is now prepared to take children's pictures regularly.-Lowel Citi- zen.
 A New York man has just swindled ho- tel out of $400. Judging from the amount we are inclined to think that he must have stayed over night.
 A Boston man claiming to be a scientist says if the earth is not bored full of holes it will burst He has probably been retained by telephone company which wants to put up some more posts. Free Press.
 The Chinese believe that the only cure for epilepsy is to stuff the patients mouth with grass The Chinese doctor doesn't believe in putting his patient to death by long, slow torture--the difference is only difference in method.-Burlingto Free Press.
 So you want to write Tor the papers, Ethel, de you, dear, and would you like to have us advise you what to write on2 Well, write on-on-both sides of the paper There is nothing which makes the editor Sc happy as an article written on both sides. He does not then feel any bangs of conscience when he puts it in-the basket.-Roston Post.
 He couldn't see-A gentleman who had once been a member of the Texas legislature was arrested in Houston for theft. Said the justice to the culprit: "You were not satis- fled to eat a dinner at the mans restaurant without paying for it, but you went off with the castor and spoons besides" '.That's so, your honor, but I took the castor and spoons from honest motives" Honest motivesa'' ssYes, I wanted to pawn them, so I could raise money to pay him for the dinner. Sees' The justice somehow failed to see it.-Texas Siftings.
 "Yes, stranger" said pass enger from Texas, F'Pm goin' down East on an impor- tant errand. Don't mind telling you that I'm going to me married. You can imagine how good-natured and jolly feel" Yes; but don't you feel a little anxiety, little trepidation, about taking such an important step in ife? "Nary a trep, stranger" "Have you ever been mar ried before?' ''No; but I've been in one fight with Injuns, two scrimnages with cowboys, and went through four cyclones. I'm no chicken. Chicago Herald.
Morning journal and courier., 1885-06-27
Saturday, June 27, 1885.
ATTACKING DRUNKENNESS. How shall the law deal with drnnlards

ATTACKING DRUNKENNESS.
 How shall the law deal with drunkards is a question which has not yet been answered very satisfactorily. Some new laws concern ing this important matter will soon go into effect in Massachusetts, and their working will be watched with interest in other States.
 As the law now stands the penalty in Massachusetts for ''simple drunk" is $1, and costs if the law sees fit, and the term of imprisonment for non-payment of this fine is ten days. The new law makes the penalty for simple drunk fine not exceeding $5 and costs, and the term of imprisonment for non-payment of fine is thirty days. It is said that the increase of the term of impris- onment for non-payment of fine was made mainly on representations of prison keepers that confinement for ten days does little more than furnish time to get the prisoner sobered off, and that many times the person convicted will go to jail for ten days rather than pay the fine. They also say that in the rural districts it is not uncommon for the same person to go from one town to another, and be committed several times for '"irst offense," instead of having a long sentence as an habitual offender. They think that these persons will be likely to pay their fines rather than be imprisoned for month.
 Another new law provides that a male person convicted of drunkenness for 8 third time within one year, or convicted of being common drunkard, may be sent to the Massachusetts reformatory for term of two fn oIrat- nf- laav when he is thought to be reformed. The person released may be returned to the reformatory if he fails to keep sober.
 But the most interesting law of all is that authorizing the commitment of habitual drunkards to the lunatic hospitals. It pro vides that person subject to dipsomania, or habitual drunkenness, may be committed to one of these hospitals, if the judge before whom the proceedings relative to his com- mitment are had is satisfied that, aside from his habits of inebriety, he is not of bad char acter, and if so committed he can be held until it appears probable that he will not continue to be subject to dipsomania, or that his confinement is not longer necessary for the safety of the public, or for his own wei fare. There is no inebriate asylum in Massa- chusetts, although the establishment of one has long been agitated, and it is thought that this law will hasten the building of one, for there is no room to Spare in the insane asylums.
 A good many drunkards are worth saving, and it is gratifying to see that there is dis position in Massachusetts to try to save them. The theory that inebriety is disease, as well as a vice or crime, has strong sup port among medical men, and there is evi- dence that it is possible to cure it when it is
Morning journal and courier., 1885-06-27

In order to don our ugly and unsuitable raj ment. o, Oscar, why didst thou not extend thy featuring tour to the land of the setting sunl
 The Princesse de Sagan, who gave such g splendid peasant ball last year in Paris, gave an even more brilliant affair few days ago, at which the guests were all dressed as ami mals, birds or insects The hostess herself appeared dressed as peacock in too utter ly lovely arrangement of satin and peacock feathers. A great feature in the entertain ment was the introduction of hive out of which came a swarm of lovely aristocratic human bees in brown and gold bodices, short tulle skirts and gold hemlets. The gardens were illuminated and the entrance court, adorned with palms, was lighted with torch es held by men in beautiful oriental ces- tunes. The staireases were mass of flow CTS. It is agreed in Paris that there has not been ball so delightfully."- original or so magnifcently carried out for many year.
 MAX O'RELL
Morning journal and courier., 1885-06-27
:"Reduced
 PriceS.'

You may read every day Tn the papers now of reduced prices" on Summer Silks, Nuns Veilings, Plaids, Tricots, Pin Checks, Jersey Jackets, and so on. Allow us to say that we are constantly on the watch to see that no one undersells us, (none of them have done it, so far, and you may depend on finding here all these things reduced" where necessary, and certainly in every instance as rheab as equal quality is offered at anywhere.