davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
The sleepy boys thought:

you.-Denrer (Cslo.) Journal Of Com.
hierce.
The sleepy boys thought:
"The Pilgrim Fathersl Where are they3
The shouting schoolboy said,
While the sleepy boy in the corner replied
81 think they must be deadl"
Chicago Sun.
First Hen: There comes the wo-
man to drive us out Of the garden"
''Yes, and she's picking up a stone, tool
Let's fly out, quick" mo, no, stay
here" ''But she's aiming right for us. v
"Yes, and If we move we might get
hit. ~ Y. Sm.
"A catastrophe he-Going into a dry.
goods store to ilirt with the salesladies,
and meeting your wife, who takes ad.
vantage of the situation by persuading
you to look at those lovely silk dres,
patterns, which are so cheap, you know.
Boston Posi-.
-''Is to-day your birthday, Mr.
Gingerbread" asked Johnny Of the
young man in the parlor. mo, Johnny.
Why do you ask?" isis is going to
make you present. She said So. "
"Indeed. What did she sayP" "Sht
said you'd been coming here long
enough, and that she'd give you the nit.
ten tonight. - Chicago Tribune.
1T was Boston girl who, having
received written invitation, out West,
to ride "burro," wrote him as follows:
81 am invited to ride 'burro' This is
a funny country. 1t is almost as strapge
to ride on a bureau. as it is to spell II
that way. but these people are very un.
conventional, and do not care much foi
education. "-Oa CITY Derrick.
Lady Customer-"Have you any
book devoted exclusively to the negro
raceP" Bookseller-'f don't think
there is any such work published.
Lady Customer "What is the best thing
you have in that lineP" Bookseller
'Well, we have number of books on
racing and nearly all contain colored
illustrations. Take your pick, madame,
here's half-a- dozen. IN y Independent.
"A New Yorker in looking for rooms
for winter quarters struck good.look-
ing landlady on Shawmut avenue, and
after terms were arranged for "board
and lodging" rem, ,rked that he wanted
something hot for supper, and was met
with the reply that they always had it.
On taking his seat last evening, with a
slm-looking spread before him, he re.
marked to the girl that he expected
something hot, when Bridget said
"Fot's the matter wild the tsye"--Bos-
ton Globe.
Clarence" said Miss Penelope
Waldo. Boston young woman, didn't
hear you say that every time you go to
the races you return home on Shank's
horses?" you did," said Clarence
gloomily. "Well, don't you think,
Clarence" continued Miss Penelope
quietly. "since Mr.. Shank is so kind
that he would let you have his horses
occasionally TO take me for drivep"
And Clarence groaned in anguish as he
reflected how modest and retiring Miss
Waldo is and how utterly impossible II
would be for him to disclose the identity
Of Mr. Shank. T. Life,
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
Russian Bast Mats.

The London Garden states that 400,.
900 mats are annually exported from
,he port OF Archaugel alone, and
large quantities reach us by way of
the Black Sea and the Baltic. Alto
gether the expectation amounts to
about 1,500,0 900 annually. and the value
Is nearly E50,O0O. These mats, so
largely used in this country for various
uses besides for packing nursery pro-
ducts, are chiefly manufactured by
peasants, who employ their spare time
in separating the bark of the lime
tree after maceration and making into
mats. When the lime tree fails, tie
willow and birch arc used. Conntry
Gentleman.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

was voluntarily coming back TO his reg.
inieh'' put the next day the Colonel of
that regiment came 10 look NJ mo anJ
ne pronounced me liar and an imnos'
tor. ' q" iinPos'
Next day when = courl-martlal was
convened, GO, had no defense to offer,
.lhey tried me as spy, and while moth.
ing could be proved, / was condemned
ana sentenced TO be shot. | was oivon
to understand that, but reckoned TIM,
some OF the officers were not quite sat.
isHed. Instead OF carrying out the sen.
tence right away, the findings were sent
'ou v vhigher court for approval.
what am telling you in a minute
consumed about two weeks. was
pretty comfortably fixed in the barn.
out so sealousiy guarded that there was
no possible show for escape. The ma.
pers had been sent off, and | was dailv
expecting to near their approval. when
one night just before dusk, the chsnlain
OF a pennsylvania regiment came In m
oonsoie me lie was about my size and
aSe WIN the same colored hair, and the
mint , saw him | grasped at a plan.
When We had talked n little | asked
him: "'A'"
"How did you git in?"
why L showed my pass to the
guard" he answered.
mat was all desired to know. He
talked for about a qsarter of an hour.
ne ADVISED me to give up all hope and
make my peace with God, and / gave
nm to understand that might be more
contrite on his next visit
tell you, that next day seemed a
week long. Ihad plan, and it prom.
ised success. When the day did BEGIN
to fade away / was so nervous and ex.
cited that l could not keep still. The
chaplain came in just at dark, and. as
he grasped my hand, he said:
"The papers have come back and YOU
must prepare to diev'
Pray for mel" says I.
He knelt right down. and he had
skeerceiy uttered word when had him
by the throat 1t was so sudden. and |
had sich grip on him, that he skeercely
Kicked. didn't want to kill him, but /
choked him until he was like a rar.
Nh "iAh blo tpit. vest tnu DnntS.
and was into EN- before he showed signs
OF coming TO. 1t was too soon to 90
out, and choked him qome more.
Poor man! felt powerful sorry to do
him sich injury, but nay life was at stake.
In about twenty minutes felt it was
safe to go out. | dragged him into
corner, set him up on end, and then
Knocked ut the door, II was opened at
once, and as squeezed out the guard
shut it without even glancing in.
"How is he, chaplain?" asked the
guard as he locks the door.
Resigned, poor man," l answered,
and of goes.
As | afterwards learned, Ihad a good
hours start. | didn't head for the
river, as might be expected. but for the
North, and it was over month before
! saw Lees lines again. A Washington
paper had long story about my escape,
and it said | would have been Shot next
day, and that the chaplain would be
laid up for . month. h.-Detrott Free
Press.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
Just Like His Father.

The other evening there were several
visitors at Colonel Grandson's house.
The Colonel takes great delight In
"showinc of" his little son, and when
the boy appeared at the parlor door, the
Colonel said: ,
Come in, Henry. Speak TO the
ladies and gentlemen. All, that's
man." ,u
ale is fine little fellow" said Mrs.
Graftney, one of the visitors. Come
here, my little man. ,,.
The boy approached her and permit
tod her TO lift him on her lap.
"why, you are heavy. How old are
you?'
"Yes. You'll soon be a man. "hM
are you going to do when you become a
man."
"Do like pa does"
"How does he doP
ooh sometimes when he comes nome
at night he falls over achalr--
"iienry!" exclaimed the Colonel,
Fails over chair and when NAV
cits mad he says its a pretty way ior :
woman to go on just because a man
takes two beers and ~,
The Colonel had seized him III" a"'
enc yy0reNpF.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
kINDNES

How softly on the bruised heart
A word of kindness falls,
And TO the dry and parched soul
The moistening teardrop calls.
Oh II they knew, who walk ed the earth.
MIA sorrow. grief and pain,
Ths power word OF kindness hath.
'Twere Paradise again.
The wealthiest and the poorest may
The simple plttance give,
Ard bid delight TO withcred hearts
Return again and live.
OH what is life, IL love be lost,
IL mans unkind to man;
oh what the Heaven that waits beyond
This brief and mortal span.
As stars upon the tranquil sea
In mimic glory shine,
So words of Kindness IN the heart
Ref, ct the source divine.
Oh then be kind. whoe'er thou art
That hreathcst mortal breath,
And II shall brighten all thy life
And sweetcn even death.
Hircno 'osicdl Journal.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

-Ohe of the m6st clever instances Of
disrcputablehess on record has been re:
Gently developed at South Boston: A
man built two houses side bv side, one
Cor himself and one TO sell. In the
house sold he had placed a furnace
against the party wall OF the cellar.
and from its hot-air chamber hc had
constructed flues to heat his own domi-
ellie. The owner of the other house
found it very hard to keep his bwn
house warm, and was astounded at the
amount of coal It took TO render his
family comfortable. while the dishonest
builder kept himself warm at his neigh
boris expense nearly whole winter
before the trick was discovered. Dos
ton, Courier,
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

From what have seem said the
heir TO the titles Of the Roman Colonnas,
who. with his wife formerly Miss Eva
Mackey), Is now in San Francisco.
"this country has resources incompara-
bly, superior to those of any country in
the old world. As regards scenery. it
has many striking features. The chief
feature Of American scenery, il J may
call it so. is its originality. have WIS.,
tied the Rocky Mountains, seen those
tremendous canyons, and climbed some
Of the highest peaks. There is a severity
Of aspect, ruggedness of character in
the landscape. Everything is conducted
ipon scale Of immensity. Chicago
Inter. Ocean,
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
profcssional FtlaucttN

prevents some doctors from advertising
their skill, but we are bound by no stch
conventional rules, and think that II we
make discovery tina. is OF benefit to our
fellows, wc ought TO spread the fact to the
whole land. Therefore we cause to be pub
lished throughout the land tho fact that
DR.. II. v. Pierce's "Golden Medical Dis.
covery" Is the best known remedy for eoiis
sumption (scrofula Of the lungs) ana hin.
dred diseases. Send two stamps for Df,
Pierce's complete treatise on consumption,
with unsurpassed means of self-treatment
Address, Worlds Dispsasary Medical As.
sociation, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
Younr Mon. Read This,

TIE voLTAIc BELT Co., of Marshall, Mich,
offer to send their celebrated ELECTRe-VoLr
rAIc BELT and other ELECTRIC APPLIANCEs
on trial for 30 days, TO men tyoung or old)
afflicted with nervous debility, loss Of vital
ity and all kindred troubles. Also for rheu.
matism, neuralgia @, ,paraly sis, and many 9TH.
er diseases. Complete restoration to health,
vigor, and manhood guaranteed. No risk in
Cured, as 30 days. trial Is allowed. Write
them ut once for illustrated pamphlet, free.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

COMPOSED of Smart-Weed, Jamaica
Ginger, Camphor Water and best French
Brandy, DIR. Picrce's Extract Of Smart
Weed is the best remedy for diarrh9a,
cholera morbus, dysentery or bloody -fux,
collie or cramps, and to break up colds.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

. Secret. neutrality-suspicious. upon
the system cured In thirty days Pam
phlet giving. particulars, three letter
stamps. Address, Worlds Dispensary
Medical Association, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

PIKE's TooTHACHE DROPS curein minute, 2bc
Gicnn's sulphur Soup heals and beauti0es. zS~'
GERMAN Corn REMOVER kills Corns Bunions.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

A BALLEr-girl Is somewhat Of a philos.
opher; she believes in gauss and chect.-
on City Derrick.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

IT would improve blind mans con.
dition II he could take a see voy age.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
THE MARKETS.

IT Is dull season when tho mountain
guide DOESN'T make ascent
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

NAPOLEON mastered enough law dni,
ing ten days confinement IN s'"''
house 10 last him q lifetime.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

BEST, easiest to use and cheapest Piso's
Remedy for Catarrh. BY druggists. 50c.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

BRED upon the waters-Rsared at sea.-
Chicago Tribune
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

fLoRIcULruRIsrs are stalk raisers aud
often have fine phlox.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

"THE cnnny Scot" ought to 60 Into
the fruit.canning business = Warrington
HatcheL
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31

JunRo is said to have eaten q bushel OF
onions daily. This accounts for his won.
derful strength. IN. y. Graphic.
The Osceola times., 1885-10-31
WIT AND WISDOM.

1t is easy enough to tell what you
know about everybody else, but hard to
tell what everybody else knows about
you.-Denrer (Cslo.) Journal Of Com
hterce,
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-12-07
.N WASHINGTON, OHIO AND WESTERN T. =
WINTER ARIA

WINTER AREA NGEMENI
Leave Washington at o 90 g. H. aid i IS n. m
and Alexandria at 8 10 q. H. and 4 55 D. M. Pass
Leesburs, going westward, at II 05 g. m. and
oo p. M and arrive at Round Hill at II Al n,
m. and 80 p. N. Loavo Round Hill at S 81 a.
m. and 70 p. m. Pass Leesburg, going cast.
ward, at q 80 a. NJ. and Up H., and arrive =.
a. Alexandria at 70 a. M. and Oh p M, and a.
Washington at 8 SO a. II. and 4 10 D.. m.
All trains arc daily except the 90 a. IN. train
from Washington, the 9 10 a. m. train from
Alexandria A and tho 26 p. III. train from Round
Hill, which arc daily except Sunday.
NPassengers from Washington will tako the
Wash, Ohio and West'n. cars at the Baltimore and
Potomac Railroad station at 900 a. M. and AS D.
M, and go through to Round Hill without change
o. cars.
The $40 q. M. train from Alexandria and 500
pm. train from Washington connect at Round Hill
with Daily Line of Coaches for Saickersyllc, Der.
ryville and Winchester; also with Line of Coached
which leave Leesburg daily for Aldo and Middle.
burg.
Both trains, Westward, make close connections,
at Vienna, with Sisson's Limo of Stages for Fsrfaz
Court House.
One thousand mile communication tickets. 500.
Alexandria, Nov. IS, 1885,
Il. BELL, Superintendent.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-12-07

NEURALGIc HEADACHE OF WoMEN.-The
increased and apparently increasing fire.
uuency of neuralgia headache among women
must needs have a cause. There is one of
singular simplicity and quite obvious which
has been overlooked, and to which it is
worth while to draw attention. The pain
experienced is generally located in one or
more of the branches of the second cervical
nerve, very commonly those terminating in
the scalp at the occiput. AS matter OF
fact. the nerves of the seal p are irritated by
the hair being drawn tightly back and put
ON the strain, not as a whole, in which case
the strain would be spread over the large
area of the surface, but by small bundles
of hair which are pulled back and held
in place by hair pins. Relief is often
consciously experienced as result of re-
moving the hair pins, but this has only a
temporary and partial effect. The injury
done is lasting if not permanent in its con-
sequences. The present style of dressing
the hair should be discontinued, as it pro.
badly, in part at least, accounts for the ex-
treme prevalence of a form of sufering which
is both intractable and distressing.-London
Lancet
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-12-07
RAILROADS.
G. z E A 7

1907 GREAT 100.
1000 PENNSYLVANIA ROUTE 1870
TO THE NORTH, WEST AND SOUTHWEST.
DOUBLE TRACK, STEEL RAILS
MAGNIFICENT EQUIPMENT
In effect November Is, 1885,
Trains leave Washington from station. correr =.
Sixth and streets, as follows:
For Pittsburg and the West, Chicago Limited
Express Of Palace Sleeping Cars ut $50 a. NJ
daily; Fast Line $50 am. daily, to Cincinnati
and St. Louis, with Sleeping Cars from Hsrris
burg to Cincinnati and Hotel Car to ST. Louis.
daily, except Saturday, to Chicago, with sleen,
ing Car Altoona to Chicago. Chicago and Gin.
cinnati Express, at 7:1O p. M. daily, with
Sleeping Cars Washington to Chicago and Har.
risburg to Louisville; connecting at Harrisburg
with Western Express with through Slecpers
for St. Louis. Pacific Express, 1000 D. m,
daily, for Pittsburg and the West, with through
Sleeper Harrisburg TO Chicago and Cleveland
BALTIMORE AND POTOMAC RAILROAD.
For Erie, Canandaigus, Rochester Buffalo. Niagara
1O:OOp. m. daily, except Saturday, with Palace
Cars Washington to Rochester.
For Nilliamsport, Lock Haven and Elmira Of
$50 q. M, daily except Sunday.
For New York and the East, T:i5, 900 and l .OO
a. III, 300, 1000 and 11:2O D. H. On SIM.
day 800 a. N, $50. 1000 and LEO =,
Limited Express OF Pullmsu Parlor Cars
$40 e. NJ. and 400 p. III. daily, except sun
day
For Boston without chsnge 200 p L. cys,v
day.
For Brooklyn, n. y, all through trains conncc, -
jersey City With boats of Brooklyn Amer
afording direct transfer to Fulton street. avoid
ing double ferriagc across New York City.
For Philadelphia, 1:15, $50 and 100 e. III.
200, 400, 600, 1000 and 1l:2O n. m On
Sunday $50 q. M, 200, 400. GOO 1000 and
11:2o pm. Limited Express, $40 q H. daily,
except Sunday.
For Baltimore 6:35, 7:15. $50. GAO $50 and
HOO a. NJ, and 1905, 300, 400. 4:25 40
600, 7:1O, 1000 and II: 30 p. a. On Sundav
$50, $50 and HOO H. H., ana 200 4IE,
GOO, ITO, 1000 and 11:2O p m.
For Pope's Creek Line. 7:15 8. N, and 4.40,
daily, except Sunday.
For Annapolis 7:15 g. m, and 1906 and 1.o5
p. M, daily except Sunday. On SunGay i u m
ALEXANDRIA AND FREDERICKSBURG sAlGwIy
AND ALEXANDRIA AND wAsHINGToS F>uRoan
For Alexandria, 600, no, 925 II O1 and LA
q. e. 2O5, AGO, 4:35, 6:01, sos and 1i.31 n
N. On Sunday ct 500, G:25. and l1:O1a, n
and sos p. m '''
For Richmond and the South GOO and ll.Oi q
m, daily, and 4:35 p. m, daily, c:cept Sunday.
Trains leave Alexandria for Washington COS
500, 1O:oO and 1910 n. H.: leo, S:G5 3:23
5:1O, 7:C5 and 1912 y. H.. AND 1910 mid.
night, except Monday. On Sunday ct 500 and
1910 A. H.; 7:O5 and 1912 D. III. and 1910
night.
Tickets and information at tho Office Northeast
corner Of 18th street and PcnnG Avenue. and ot
the station, where orders can DO loft Tor tho cbec
ing O! baggage TO destination from hotels and
residences J.R WOOn e p
C9AS. E. PUGH, &. III.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-12-07
PULLMAN SERVICE.


Trains Nos. so and 81, Pullman Buffet and
Sleeping Cars between Washington and New
Orleans without change Pullman Buffet and
Sleeping Cars between New York and Atlanta
without change Mann Boudoir Cars Atlanta
to Now Orleans via Bennington.
Train No. so makes close connection at Green's
boro with Sleeper to AsherUe, ~ c.
Trains Nos. 90 and 90, Pullman Buffet and Sleep
ing Cars between Washington and New Orleans,
without change. Pullman Sleeping Cars be-
tween Washington and Augusta without change.
Trains Nos. Sd and 55, Pullman Sleeping Cars.
between Washington and Louisville without
change. Pullman Sleeping Cars, between Char
lottesville and Cincinnati without change
BRANCHES.
MANASSAS DIyIsION-Daily except Sunday.
Westwaid-Leave Washington 2:3O p. m. Alex.
andria, 2:55 p. m. Manassas 1853 D. m. Ar
rive Front Royal 632 p m, Riverton Gal p.
m. Strasburg 7O5 p. m. Accommodation leaves
Manassas 4:15 a. m. Arrive Front Royal
1920 a. NJ, Riverton 1895 q. m. strasburg
11:3O o. m.
Eastward-Leave strasburg 6:1O a. m. River
ton G:3S a. In. Front Royal 6:51 a. N. Ar
rive Manassas 9:15 a. m. Alexandria 1915 a.
leave Strasburg 1900 noon. Riverton 1880
noon. Front Royal 1:2O p. m. Arrive Manas.
sas 7:05 p. NJ Alexandria $50 p. m. Wash
ington 9:15 p. m.
WARRENTON BRANCH.
Trains Nos 80, 81, Sd, and 55 connect daily at
Warrerton Junction to and from Warren
ton Trains Nos. 3d. SO and So daily, except
Sunday, to and from Warrenton. Train No.
SO does not connect with Wsrrenton.
FRANKLIN DIVISION.
DAILY except Sunday. Leave Rocky Mount 700
a. IN. Arrive Franklin Junction 1920 a. m.
Leave Franklin Junction 500 p. M. Arrive
Rocky Mount 1870 p. m.
CONNECTIONS.
At Orange with P. F. & P. L. K. for Fredericks-
burg. At Gordonsville aud Charlottesville with
Chesapeake and Ohio Ry for Richmond, Old
Point, Staunton, and points East and West, and
Virginia Springs. At Lynchburg with Norfolk
and Western K. r. for Southwest Virginia,
Bristol, Chattanooga, Memphis, Nashville and
Knoxville; and with Richmond and Ale
ghany r. R. for Lexington and Natural Bridge
as well as points on z. & A. r. Z. east of
Lynchburg.
At Danville with Richmond and Danville, for
all points in the Carolinas, Florida, Georgia and
the South. At Riverton with Shenandoah VAL
ley E. z. for Luray and Points in the Page Val
ley. At Strasburg with tho Baltimore and Ohio
for Harrisenburg Winchester and points in the
Shenandoah Valley.
All trains make close connections at Washing
ton with through trains to and from the North
and West via both Penna. and B. & O. E. B.
Through tickets 1T lowest prices to all import.
ant points in the United States. This is the best
line for points in Texas and California
For all information, tickets and Sleeping Car
reservations apply to agents of this company, or
J. s. B. THOMPSON,
Assistant General Passenger Agent,
Alexandria, Virginia.
ROBERT ANDREWS, supt. and Eng.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-12-07
ADVICE TO MOTHERS.

MES. W1NsLow's SOOTHING SYRUP, for chill
dren teething, is the prescription of one Of the
best female nurses and physicians in the United
States, and has been used for forty years with
never.failing success by millions of mothers for
their children. During the process of teethlng
its value is incalculsble It relieves the child
from pain cures dysentery and diarrhea, gripping
in shs bowels, and wind collie. By giving health
10 .ne 'niio ~ 80 mv5-1yrA.W&S
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1885-12-07

physicians, l have in stock full supply of
l. Reed & Carnrick's Beef Peptonoids-
n1zed Cod Liver Oil and Milk, Liquid Peptonoids,
Peptonoids Iron and Wine and Soluble Food for
lnfanta. ]. D. n. LUNT,
noVl1 Cor. King and Washington SITS.