davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
tlIrlng De Yonnr rInnnIesson

The pay.ttain stopped al VII.
10y Bend . pay the railroad hands
and to liquidate claims for cattle
on the track in that section. A
gaunt, hnbgty.lOoking granger
stepped up tolhssnart young man
who vas dispensing the cash 10 the
rear endofthecar "Goi my name
on your books, misIer2n @lios
should / know unless you lell me
your nnme2s "Kerrect yon are.
You have got the edge on me there.
Well, my name Is Rufus Mccon.
key" ayes, said the young man,
referring tohis books, eMr. MeCGn.
key, / hayegol you down fora hog
"Hase me downtfor a hog, have
you? Well, I'll have you down lor
a half an hour, aud III be on top
Of you, maxim il sorter excitin' 10
you IT, you don't revise that ex
preston. Now, say after me:
Colonel McConkey, scho,l Trus
tee, Fourth Distriot-Yonr name,
sir, is on this here list asa bonncy
hdcrcteditor Of the /. and G. N.
Railroad, which tho amount are
$40 the vally of one spotted Betk.
shire hog; said amour! Of $40, lido
me proud to hand to you. Won't
you have a ciguF Colonel9" The
smart young assistant paymaster
repeated after Mr.. McCOnkey word
for word, handed him the $40, and
then gave him a cigar. Col. Nc.
Conkoy put the hammer ofhis six.
shooter back to halfcock, and then
strobe out, muttering: "some city
chaps think they're smart, but
they'll find they has to come out To
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
Washc,I.OnlTguir.

There is a sort of pallid, chalky
complexion which the novellsls cali
a "washed.out complexion" II is
ghastly enough, and no mistake
Washed,ouL faded, discolored, or
parii'colored hair is almost as re-
gulsiye and melancholy. Parker's
Hair Balsam will restore your hair
TO Its original color, whatever il
was; brown, auburn or black, Why
wear moss on your head, when you
may easily have lively, shining
hair.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
Rucklen,s ArI,lcn Snlrn

The Bea Salre in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum, Fe.
yer Sores, letter, Chapped Hands, Chill.
blains, corns, and all skin Eruptious,
and positively cures Piles, or no pay re.
qnired. Its guaranteed to give perfect
satisfaction, or money refunded. Price,
% cts. per box. For sale by W. S. Hoy,
Druggist. [dec.lO-ly
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

The Canadian Governmet is con.
sidering a scheme to arm and equip
q number Of schOoners which the
Americans would be unable to dis
tinguish from ordinary fishing
{. and thus prevent Anne ican
fishermen from taking fish in
Canadian waters.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
Notice to Fiduciarios.
COMMISSIONERS 0PpIcE,

III. Administrators, Executors, Guar.
n dians, Committees and Cnrators
are required by Chapter Gs OF tho Acis
OF the Legislature Of lSS9, 10 make annual
settlements before the Commissioner Of
Accounts. A failure TO so renders tlom
liable to a fine OF not less than so nor
more than 500, Upon examination Of
the records find a large number Of
fduciaries who have never made any
settlements al all. A large number
must settle theiraccopntsb before the un-
dersigned during this aud next month.
This is positively the last notice | shall
give. JOHN Il. TJNIAIs
Commissioner Of Accounts for Mason
county, w. Va. [nov5-2n
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

The lions have been eating up
the lion tanners this year. In fact
all the lions seem to be gifted with
a good appetite for chewing up
things except the British lion.
He doesn't even seem to relish
Arab meat.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

"A gun and a bank cashier are
alike in one respCct at least, There
is always danger Of their going Of
prematurely.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

i0I Ntor the WORKING class. Sead 10 cents fns
iH postage, and we will mail you rRRS, a
HWIll Sr1yal, valuabr box Of sample goods that
EN will put you in the way Of making more
money 10 few days than you ever thought possible
at any business capital not required. We will
start you, You can work all the time OF in snare
Hme only The work Is universally adapted to both
sexes, young ard old, You can easily earn from 50
cents to IS every evening, That all WIN waa, work
NAY iestthe bu ineSS, We make hi, unparalleled offer
to all who not well satisfied va will send s. 10
pay for the trouble Of writing US Full particulars,
directions, ETC., sent free, Fortunes will b, made
by those who give their whole time to the work
Great success absolutely sure. Don't delay. Start
now Address STlSSoE & Co., Portland Maine
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

The Arabs at war with the Eng.
fish fight desperately and refuse 10
give or take quarter Their man.
ner OF ATTACK, by stealth, surprise,
and suddenness, seems to make
them very formidable enemies.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
VALUABLE FARM FOR SALE.

A FARM Of 2O7 acres situated in
u Robinson District, Mason County,
West Virginia, four miles from Point
Pleasant, on Letart road, and known Rs
tho KincadO farm. This farm is well
improved and well watered; two houses;
good barn; two orchards; all necessary
9utbuildings. Will DO sold on easy
terms, For further Information apply
TO RIO. K n. 4. KlNCADE, Ag'ts.
mchll-2m' Point Pleasant, W, Va
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

No matter whether bonnots have
little birds on them or not, the
amount Of bill is always the same.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

and the many Tliroa, Affections Of Children, prom.
ply, pleasantly and safely cured by Rough on
Coughs" Troehes, iSe,; Balsam, age.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Hacking, Irritating Coughs, Colds, Sore Throat
cured by "Rough on Coughs" Trochrs, I5c.-
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

II you arc tili1g, brnken, worn out and nervou,
use "Wels' Health Renewer," S.. Druggists.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

lfyou ar. losing y1ur grip on lifc, try "Wells'
Health Renewsr." Gees direct to weak spots.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Wells Health Remover restores health and vigor,
eurss Dyspepsia, Headache, Nervousness, Debility.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Children, slow il development, puny, sctawny
and delicate, use "wells Health Renewer.'
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
non. 8, lSsl-Iy.


Ask for "Reugh on Coughs" for Coughs, Colds.
Sore Throat, Hoansas,s. froeheS, lsc. Liquid, ass
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
Pretty W'unluu.

Instant relief for Neuralgia, 1oothaehe, FaeeachC
Ask for "Rough on FOc;iachs," IS and as cents
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Palpitation, Dropsieal Swellings, Dizziness, lnd
geaipn, ieaiachs, SleeplsssneSi cured by "Wcils
Health Remover"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

The story Of a Transfers life is
nearly always tale Of whoa.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Rough on Itch cures humor, erlpliosS, rtng
worm, tstssr, salt rheum, frosted feet shilbllinS
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Clears on, rats, mice, reaches, iss, ants. bedbng,
skunks, ehiPHunS', gophers. i5'. Druggists.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Strengthening, improved, the best for backacht
pains in chest or side, rheauatisni, neuralgia,
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

three or four hour every nigh, coughing. Get i'm
mediate relief and sound rest By using Wells Rgugl
on Coughs Troehes, iSc.; ia'am, zSe.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

A wicked milk.dcaler shoulders
whenever his wife asks him if he
would like to have some pumpkin
pie.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

A boy in u rural spelling school
sat down on a word of one syllable.
1t was probably patch.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Strengthening, improved, the best for baekaehs,
pains in chest or side, rheumatism, neuralgia.
nov. 5, IssI-Iy
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Ladies who would retain freshness and viyaeity-
Don't fail to try "wslls' Health Reviewer"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

A Western editor has spent six
years writing a book entitled
How to Test Glue" And easy
subject 10 stick to.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

A ring around the moon is a sign
Of rain. A ring around gi,l's
finger is also a sign of reign.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

STANDARD TIlIE.-East OF Hun.
lingtnn, 10Th meridian, or Eastern time;
West Of Huntington, a0th meridian, or
Central time, which is one hour slower
than Eastern time.
No: daily except Sunday, Old Point
to Clifton Forge; leaves Clifton Fo.e
i0ily'eXcept Saturday. arrives Cincin.
natl and Louisville daily, except Sunday.
Sleeping Cars from Clifton Forge to
Huntington. Pullman Parlor Cars Old
Point Comfort 10 Washington.
No. 9Nnd 5, daily between Huntington
and Clifton Foige. No. ., daily, except
sunday, from Richmond to Neport News
Old Point aud Norfolk.
Nos. Band !, Solid trains daily, with
Pullman Sleeping Cars, between Wash.
ington, Richmond, ind louisville and
Cincinnati. DunUt stop for local bust,
ness.
No. @, daily except Sunday, from lou.
isville, Cincinnati, and Lexington, mr..
rives Clifton Forge daily, except Monday
leaves Clifton Forge for old Point dniIW
except Sunday. Sleeping Cars Hunting.
ton 70 Clifton Forge. Pullman Parlor
Cars Washington to OIL Point
Charlottesville .lcconunpd fOH, - No. 8
,miSrd, leaves Richmond, except Sun.
day, 800 p. M; arrive Charlottesville, II
p. IN.
No, $, (Wixed,) daily except Sunday,
IynVpg charlottesville g.nO a az ,,r;,.o
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

Items Of interest coupons,
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15

The greatest mash on record
Truth crushed to earth.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-15
Tho Ohio River Rail Road Tin
Table.
IN EFFECT JUNE %. 1884.

Central dmc one hour slorr han PsrE.
ersGtirg tine,
The Waco daily examiner. [volume] (Waco, Tex.) 187?-1888, 1885-12-06
CAUSE FOR REJOICING.

Matagorda oysters % cents PEI
dozen, AT the St. Charles
The Waco daily examiner. [volume] (Waco, Tex.) 187?-1888, 1885-12-06
A word OF warning.

A word Of warning.
Castles Il Morrison will open, this
week. the most elegant line of holiday
goods ever brought to Waco. Don't
be in too big a hurry about buying
presents until you have examined the
stock at the Old Corner Drug store.
you want some bargains in girls
and BOYS school hoes, look AT our
counter lots at ! a pair
SANGER BROTHERS.
Ecoromy Is wealth We are sell
Ing bedroom and parlor suits at
figures never before offered.
STEINER II STEPHENSON.
Dcane'- cabinet photos 81 per dol
The Waco daily examiner. [volume] (Waco, Tex.) 187?-1888, 1885-12-06

lie wa, conveyed to George Kram-
err, hotel and placed on II bed where
Drs. DO. willis, Curt, and Wood
ward attended him. He was wrapped
IN i'm blankets and rubbed with Zulu
remedy. At $3.50 O'CLOCK Mr. Clark
was suffering terrible psiu,, but "a few
minute, later he wa, resting As
easy "a, could he expected. The doc
tors had intended making an eNami-
nation To see il any bones we're broh-
en-, or internal injuries received, as
soon as reaction took place The IN
AMINER reporter left before thi, was
done. and knows nothing OF the re-
suit of the examination.
AFTER Mr. Clark was taken out of
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
why She Loved Him.

"Beatrice," said a Boston mother
to her daughter, "why do you per.
sist in seeing this mani You
know that your father and l do
not approve oft"
II don't know"
"why don't you tell him keep
away from the hOuse2"
~ don't know"
"Why don't you Tell him that
your father has forbidden you to
see himH If he lisa gentleman that
will keep him away"
~ don't know"
"Yes, you do know. 1t is be.
cause you love him. Now, duugh.
ter, why do you waste your affect.
ions on himR He is not talented,
and far from being handsome.
He is much beneath you, in every
respect, What is 1t that makes
you so infatuated with himP"
81 can't tell yOu, mamma; no
more than I can tell you why l
like beans. 1t just seems to be
that way, and that's all that can
tell about it."
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
Their wedding Tour.


A little girl writing from the
West tells this story illustrative of
Indian ways: The indians. we
have seen here seem to be Of the
lowest and most degraded type.
The other day, when my sister and
| were driving along Magnolia
avenue, we saw a young and pretty
Indian girl, who seemed to be of a
better class, walking with her faith.
or along the'road. Her eyes we're
cast down, and she seemed to be
very much embarrassed. On the
old mans side, and further across
the road, walked a young Indian,
who seemed to be trying to catch
the girls eye; but whenever he
got little holder and yentured
the nearer, tho old man crushed
him with his sternest look. We
did not pay much attention othis,
aud had forgotten all about it,
when the next day we saw this
group, minus the father, sitting on
the side Of the canal in the shade
Of palm tree. The young man
was talking to her in a low tone,
and she seemed deeply interested
in what ho was saying. Three
weeks after we saw them again.
They were going up the Aroya,
he in front, swinging his arms,
and paying not the slightest at.
tention to her. She was toiling
some yards behind up the hill, car.
rying large bundle on her head,
Look" I said, "They are MARI.
ed" And this was their wedding
tourl
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
These are NoIid Fnots.

The best blood purifier and system
regulator within the reach Of suffering
humanity, truly is Electric Bitters. In
activity Of the Liver, Billiousness, Jaun.
dice, Constipation, Weak Kidneys, OF
any disease of the Urinary Organs, OF
whoever requires an appetizer, tonic OF
mild stimulant, will always find Electric
Bitters the best and only certain cure
known. They act surely and quickly,
every bottle guaranteed to give entire
satisfaction or money refunded. Sold at
fifty cents bottle by Hoy. a
In the midst Of hard times the
Ohio River Railroad holds Its own
and the superintendent reports
business the last week is as pros
porous as ever.-Sentinsl.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
Had Seen il All.

One night while John McCul,
lOgh was playing "virginius" in
Little Rock, a lean old fellow from
the hills, while standing at the
foot Of the opera house stairs, wa,
accOsted by an acquaintance, who
asked:
"Unclo Billy, are you going tc
see the show?"
"What sort o a show is IL, LigoP'
Zone o these here actin show.
whar men an' women come out on
a platform an bow an scrape."
mo bosses in it Lige2"
mo HOSES, Uncle Billy"
"Then l don't believe I'll 60 up
l got enough o that sort O. thing
when Abe spille:'s school shel
down. We've seed all they could
do. Come on here an les GO
round here whar that fellow il
playiu' a fiddle in a grocery"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
ARemarkable Escape.

Mrs. Mary A. Daley, Of Tunkhsn-
mock, Pa, was afflicted for six years
with Asthma and Bronchitis, during
which time the best physicians could
give no relief. Her life was despaIred
Of, until in last October she procured a
Bottle Of DR.. Kings New Discovery,
when immediate relief was felt, and by
continuing its Use for a short time she
was completely cured, gaining in flesh
80 lbs. in a few months.
Free Trial Bottles of this certain cure
for all Throat and Lung Diseases at W.
s. Hoy's Drug Store. Large Bottles 81.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
Maslled.0nlHn

There is a sort of Iallid, chalky
complexion which the novellsts call
u "washed.aut complexion" 1t is
CHASTITY enough, and no mistake
Washed.out faded, discolored, or
parti.cOlOred hair is almost as re-
pulsiye and melancholy. Parker's
Hair Balsam will restore your hair
to its original color, whatever it
was; brown, auburn or black. Why
wear moss on your head, when you
may easily have lively, shining
hair.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
Chronic Dyseriery.

NJ James Brannan. Second svenne,
Pittsburgh. Pa. writes \ For iwo years
j have been constantly. troubled with
chronic diarIiiua, Of q sentefy, having
had, on an nserast, from twenty 10
twenty-five passages every twenty four
hours, and esety one bloody. ] had
Thoroughly tried all The prominent ply
sieians Ia fPittshurgh. was twice u tie
West Penn Hospital, de first time thif-
teen weeks, and though ! len II much
better, vet Ia Eve days was IS bad a
ever. ! then tried two other great doc.
tors In this eity, and one Of them finally
assured me ] was not long for tlis world.
and advised me 70 write 70 my friends
about It. / next went to Df. Hartman,
without the lest confidence that he could
DO anything forme. He examined me,
smiled. and said, be could stop the bloody
discharges niles than Two week., which;
be did with PRRuNA, and have now
been entirely we'll for several weeks, and
never ielt better in my life, though am
ttill taking his PERuSA. | will take L
whenever need medicine.
mr.. Patrick Burns, Pittsburgh, writes
al have suffered intensely from piles and
chronic dianhea. D was treated BY Eve
Of the best physicians and surgeons IN.
the city Of Pittsburgh, and with all grew
constantly wone. Finally three Of them
said my only hope was an operation,
This frightened me, and went fmmedi.
ately to Dr.. Hartman, who has entirely
cured ine with PgRusA. ] have been at
work now for three months, and never In
my life felt better. Cail and see me n
corner Of Twenty.seyeuth and, Mulberry
streets, Twelfth ward, Pittsburgh
Me- Patrick Cunningham, S. S., near
Sidney street, Pittsburgh, Pa, writes
aForfye years Ihaye suffered inexpress.
IDLY from Internal and external piles. I
have tried The best physicians Of Pitts.
burgh and Allegheny without relief I
went TO Dr.. Hartman, who cured me
without detention from work with Pc.
RuHA.n
Charles Frank, Of Emrichvitle, Jeier.
son county, Ohio, writes: II bad piles
and fstula in ano for four years. had
suffered constantly with a discharge Of
matter from the parts, and sometimes
from the contents Of the bowels through
It. / could not have borne It much
longer. / had heard 60 much Of the III
effects Of a knife operation that ] resolved
togo to Dr.. Hartman. He ridiculed the
silly idea Of cutting II, and at once per.
formed his own original operation with.
out the knife, and without pain. lam
thoroughly cured, though ofcourse I took
pERuNA.h
nov. s. 1sSl-ly.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
A Rapid Writer.

"Ah," said a man who delights
in rapid composition, "Williamson
spends hours on page Of manu-.
script, ehR Well now let me tell
you, no American writer Of to-day
can afford to be so slow. The art
accurate composition is only &C.
quired by long practice. Why,
sir, | never read over my stuff"
"NeiIher does the public" some
one remarked. 1t is strange, yet a
very few words often destroy the
friendship, which, Clinging like an
old vine, covers may years.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08

It would doubtless be very very
wicked 10 express q wish for such a
result, but it is nevertheless a fact
that if the British Lion and the
Russian Bear should conclude to
claw each other, as now seems
highly probable, it would not te
regarded as serious calamity 70
American interests. There would
be a demand for our productions,
such as has not existed since the
American war. It's an i'll wind
that blows no good to any body,
and if nothing will suffice those
two beligerent powers but blood.
this nation will do its hest to sup.
ply them with the sinews Of war.
Salesman.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
IIav a Rough Syestern Nan
Found u Relative bya Court.


aYon have % 20 into Che
forwardcoach,p said tie copdeclo,
as he tore Of q coupon from a Sec
ond class ticket s4il -,
@Bnt the tabacco smoke isfosbad
and / have such a headache" the
little woman timidly said, and the
pale face was raised pleadiDgly.
Cant helpit. Ralesof The road
require passengers having second
class ticketslo ride in the forward
coach" was the incorporating
reply ashe passed on.
aHapg your rulesl" blurted out a
big man with a fierce mastache.
@s!ay where you are, madam.
You look tired, here, lot me turn
this seat over SO you can lie down.
Put your head on this grip. Here's
my oyercoa! put q on" and be
had her nicely tucked away before
she could object.
"Yout tickeL2 all o. k Take
mine; It's 10 the same place, first
class, unlimited. Hove to smoke,
Always ride in the smoker any
how And he went forward
Dinner was announced in the din Z
ing.car, and the big man came
busting in and insisted on her
having dinner She objected; eyi.
IDENTIFY thinking 1t improper to re.
cpiye 50 much attention from a
stranger skate Adams" read
the big man, looking at the name
on her yalice.
"Not Dick Adams vife9 You
are2 Well BY gosh, Why, come
here. III kiss you, my grip Dicks
my youngest brother. Well, 1llbs
- Well, we'll. Why, l was just
going out to see him. Heard he'd
got fat broke and kind o want to
ret him up again"
And the big man looked so hap.
py and the little sister.in.law SO
pleased that the passengers forgot
to kill the "straw" lnnatic that had
been taking a vote of the passen.
gers on the presidential question.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
RuCklen,s Arnicn Snlre.

The Bet Salrt in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum, Fe.
yer Sores, letter, Chapped Hands, Chill
blains, corns, and all Skin ErupHons,
and positively cures Piles, or no pay re.
quired, 1t lis guaranteed to give perfect
satisfaction, or money refunded. Price,
% cts. per box. For sale by W. S. Hoy,
Druggist, [dcc.lO-ly
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1885-04-08
Succeeded Too Well.

snow" said the bride" "Henry,
l want you to understand distinct.
ly that | do not wish to be taken
for a bride. l am going to behave
exactly as II l were an old married
woman. So dearest, DO not think
me cold and unloying if l treat
you very practically when there is
anybody by"
II don't believe l can pass for an
old married man, am SO fond Of
you that l am bound to show it.
/ am shure to give the snap away"
"No, you mustn't. It's easy
enough. And insist that you be.
have inst like all old married men
do. Doyou hear2"'
Well, uuEllugi III Wy, ouI KNOW
/ will not succeed"
The first evening ofthsir arrival
the bride retired to her chamber
and the groom fell in with q poker
party, with whom he sat playing
cards until 4 o'clock in the morn.
ing. His wife spent the weary
hours weeping. Az last be turned
up and met his grief.striCken bride
with hilarious question;
"Well, ain! l dOing the old mar.
ried man like q daisy2"
She never referred to the subject
again, and every body knew after
that that they had just been mar.
ried.