Weekly Chillicothe crisis., 1885-06-11

| lou plHCH IL dTOUnl lHc CuEcS, so.
See? My mother used to have an old
wheel out of n wooden clock, and she
printed landscapes in holes all over
the pie. But that isn't necessary. 1t
adds lustcr, but no dignity, to the per-
fOrmancc. Now, we put it in the
oven, this wise, and in short time we
will have accomplished results in the
immediate line OF pie"
at is really wonderful how well you
remember how your mother made
them" smiled Mrs. Spoopendyke.
"You won't feel badly because it
beats yours?' said Mr.. Spoopendyke,
kindly, you won't cry?' and he
chuckcd her under the chin, and
opened the stove door cautiously to SEQ
how affairs were progressing.
'Ill try not to- replied Mrs.
SpJOpcndykc, casting her eyes down,
and suppressing something that sound
ed like sob.
"LctS sec. You stick in 4 broom
splint, don't you, when you want to
know If the pie is done? Where's
your broom? Show me the happy
broom that is to be immortalized by
| testing this grand apothcosis of pic!'
Mis-. Spoopcndykc produced tho
broom, and the husband, carefully Sc
lccting one of the splints, jabbcd ava;
at the upper crust.
at won't go in, he remarked, rath-
cr dOIcfully, selecting another with
similar results. The trouble is with
the broom. Haven't you got Il broom
that knows something about its busl-
ness, or is this one of those pious
brooms that won work on Sundays?'
and he broke up several more splints
in vain CndCavOr to penetrate tho
pie.
Hadn't YOU better try the handle,
dcar?' suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke.
mo, hadn't better try the handle,
dcarn mimickcd Mr.. Spoopcndykc.
Come out here, and lets see what's
the occasion OF this uncallGd for resist
ance" and MIR Spoopcndyke hauled
his pie out Of the oven and fired it
down on the table. scot an idea that
You're going to be aSSaSSinatcd with
broom splint, haven't yc? Think
you're n sort of n bulwark Of Amcri-
can liberties and bound TO resent for
cign intervention, don't We? Well,
you ain t; you're bnly mcasly pie,
and you're going to have something
stuck in We, if it takes q cold chiScl
and cannon and Mr.. SpOodcndykc
stabbed at it with Il fork, and then
with II chOpping.kniic, without pro-
ducing the faintcSt impression.
You're up in pic, what dye suppose
is the matter with the thing?' he
asked, turning on his wife.
"lf I'd been your mother, | should
have put some lard in the crust, re-
turned Mrs. SpoUpcndykc, compla-
Gently.
81 don't know how you're going to
get lard in Il crust that you cant pcnc-
with hcyonct"' rctortcd Mr.. Spou-
pcndykc, upon whom it began TO dawn
that there was hitch somewhere.
"'vC almost forgotten how mother
did try pies to see ii they were donc.'
'Dd She ever try club?' inquired
Mrs. Spoopcndykc, timidly.
mo, she didn't try Il cluh' roarcd
Mr.. Sp0opcndy Ike. Come thithcr, my
gentle pc" lie howlcd, planting his
list in the middle of the apparatus.
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.tanSnc's '''c SURPRISING BUSINESS h"9
lt' l"pS ou ""n l'Ee tno pie'
Po'c yo" Nc So' so,''c iuSHlonooIc no
llo9 .hal you Hu MUn cure cure W asSoc'a'G
WIN 'n's pc! won, ou nceui' '' l
"o'. lolvo "nI'cnSNn! "cqu"Ih'nnccs
on my wlie' ! DolGVo IN making nome
a paraulSc' uo' "o lorth' ple' ana
he Sfled II through .he Wihuow' giaSS'
SASH anu All NAT sun your ne
yeIicu' DocS your moral hature leel
relIeNeu Dy tne absence OF inc PIC you
have Dreh inS'rumehtal Ill casting
upon the ch''Ie1 Gnarl'ics oil IN uA-
sSmpalhe'lc WorluE
guess 'hat PIC can laKc care or
ltscii, suggested MIS- SpoopcndyRo'
Soo'hiniTN. nc hoAl 'lino ! nlahu
motncr useu TO- 80,