Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1885-09-27

course to pursueG II would certainly
never do to alarm the newly-escaped
birds unnecessarily. for should they be-
come unduly excited the chances were
that they would at once pay flying
visit to the grounds Of the choleric son
of Mars. Some such thoughts as these
we're evidently passing rapidly through
the brain of the pcrplexed Chuckles, as
be stood gazing at his chicks, which
were serenely unconscious Of the per-
picking interest that their hayward be-
hayior had aroused in the breast OF
their new owner, and energetically con-
tinued their copgenial occupation OF
scratching up recently-sown patch oil
flower seeds.
At length ray Of light pierced Mr..
Chuckles's bald Uranium. 'Tiddle-
winks," said he, "go and hide behind
a gooseberry bush. as near to the ham
per as you can get; and then when
YOU see the birds return and get into
it, creep out softly, and bang down the
lid as sharp as you can"
"When I see 'em a-gettin' into the
'amper, sir - exclaimed Tiddlewinks,
gripnipg; "but don't think as ever
Shall see 'em get into it."
"None of your insolence to me, you
chattering magpie /; do as | tell you. |
am now going into the house; and
bark you, if anything peculiar happens
come and inform me instantly, or 1t
will be the worse for you"
eyes, sir" meekly replied the youth,
who, as soon as he saw the retreating
form of his master. disappear from
view, began to indulge in species of
Zulu war-dance, or exaggerated "cel-
lar flap" which calisthenics exercise,
although doubtless much appreciated
in festive moments by his chums Of the
distinguished order Of buttons" was
not exactly calculated to meet with APP
proval from a number Of shy fowls.
Therefore, what happened under the
circumstances was not matter for
much surprise. The q" old bird" whose
popularity has been alluded to, by q
kind of half-fying, halfjumping move
ment, succeeded in locating itself on
the other side of the fence exactly in
the centre Of promising clump of ten
der ANNALS, whittier it was, of course,
Immediately followed by the majority
Of its fellow-birds.
When Tiddlewinks saw what had
happened he suspended his healthy ex-
ercise as suddenly as he had begun it,
and stood staring in semi-imbecile
manner at the cochins, which had so
unceremoniously transferred themselves
over the way. "Wot rare go! /" at
length gasped out the bewildered youth.
won't there be game just. and no
mistake ! When that there Major sees
'em he'll be on the rampage. Wot's
to be done? Oh, / remember. The
Guv'nor said as how if anything pecu-
liar took place | was to let him know
directly so, as this is very rare start,
I'll be off and tell him."
Suitipg the action to the word, the
page began to proceed leisurely toward
the house, but had scarcely got twenty
yards in that direction when his foot
steps were arrested by stentoriar
voice in his rear calling: "Hi, hi
you boy there-you in buttons, con
found you Come back, say, and ex
plain the meaning Of those abominable
fowls being in my garden, or by Jovt
III put an ounce of lead into you"
1.-THE Major " gasped Tiddlewinks
instinctively changing his slow marcel
into a stampede.
Mr.. Chuckles was busily employed
upon a plan for proposed hen; house
when his page burst unceremoniousl,
into the room into state of breath
lessness-the combined result of terrol
and unwonted exercise. The domestic
architect, thus rudely disturbed in tn
midst of his weighty labors. directed
tow ard the intruder a look Of stern in
quiry.
1.-THE Major. " exclaimed the dis
tressed youth in piteous tones.
"Well, what Of the Major? Wha
is the matter with the Major? Has h
been seized with an apoplectic Fl
through giving way to violent pas
sion 2" inquired Mr.. Chuckles, grimly
"No, sir-not a fit, sir; but tn
cochin-chiners, SIR"
"Ah, the fowls; what Of them
Have they returned into the hamper?
"Oh, Lor'; no, SIR responded It'd
dlewinks, who had by this time recoy
cred his breath. II only wishes a
they had, sir"
II left you in charge of those birds,
said Mr.. Chuckles, land woe betid
you should they have gone astray
Now. tell me instantly, where ar
they?"
"That's just wot it is, sir" answere
the page with desperation.
II have every desire to be calm an
temperate in my language, gravely re
marked Mr.. Chuckles, 'but if you d
not Immediately explain that last re
mark of yours / shall most certainl
be oDngeu 10 oena'e Ill manner MOI
forcible than polite"
" Yes, sir, that is just wot-I NEAR
sir, that them birds has got into tn
Majors garding and is a-routin' of
up, sir"
"Then they must be got back agai
at all risks" said Mr.. Chuckles in
, do-or-die " tone Of voice.
"Yes, sir, please, sir. But the Nj
jor knows all about it, sir; he's see
'em, and said be would put hounce {
: lead into me, SIR"
"Oh, he used threatening Language
2 did he?" remarked Mr.. Chuckles wit
= quite a magisterial air. "H'm,
) think you may retire now, while ju,
= think over wlaS is the best to be dor
under the peculiar circumstances.
The youth required no second BIZ
9 ding, but quilted the room with prais
, worthy alacrity, only too pleased to
y let off so easily.
"Yes, Mr.. Featherwell, you have a
: complished nice days work with yo,
. present of poultry" soliloquized Il
irate Chuckles as he paced up and dow
: the room. "But | will be even vii
0 you, sir; I'll owe you one, as the ma
says in the play"
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