Turner County herald. (Hurley, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1884-05-15
PLEASANTRIES.

admirers of Ella Wheeler. NeW Or
leans Piccgune.
AN Indian prince has had throne
made OF solid glass. It will now be pcs
sible to see the power behind the throne
Free Press.
"BoYs these days." remarked
street urchiD, as be picked up the stub
Of cigar and pulled away at it, "begin
where erown people leave off. "-Phil-
adelphia Call.
AN Indiana boy was sentenced to four
years. imprisonment for stealing suit
of clothes. Out in Indiana it is pretty
serious thing to lose suit of clothes.-
Burlington Free Press.
"PA," asked Walter, "what is q
Buddhist" "a Buddhist, my son."
replied pa, lis a-well-a sort of horti-
cultural chap-you've heard of budding
fruits, you know. ."-1fmes-D Democrat.
CHESTERFIELD CHEEK, '84-"Is this
seat epgaged?" She-"Yes, tir, I am
keeping It for gentleman. G. c.,
blowing politely)-"Madame, he is
here" (Sits down. = HarUard Lam
poon.
"WHAT's tea this morning 2" asked
Frink of his grocer the other day.
"Sixty cents" sWell, amt that too
steep?" "Of course IFS too steep; you
wouldn't roast tea, would you ?"-Ihe
Jxdge.
"No," said Miss FIore, zone cannot
call Mrs. Grece very handsome OF very
entertaining, but thereis such an air OF
interest about her. She doesn't live
with her husband, you know. boston
transcript.
THERE is at least one spot on this fair
earth where the base ball fend cannot
get in his work. On vacant lot near
Covingtor, KY. is posted this sign:
s,No plane bnce- Bol en- theas Primaces."
Chicago Herald.
A LADY in Toronto got to laughing
over some amusing incident SO that she
couldn't stop. Finally doctor was
called in, and he couldn't quiet her. AS
a last resort some one had to tell her
that her back hair was coming down. :
81 DON'T think Misther Flaherty was
nominated laga1ly," said Michael.
ttPhat's thai?" asked Timothy. "Oi say
NIisther Flaherty must havegot hisnom-
ination illagally, for all was quiet
and PEACEFUL they till me, and dlyil a
foight of amy koind at the caucus. -
Boston Transcript.
A PHILADELPHIA has completed q
book OF Welsh hymns, with music. The
hymn commencing: 20 dewch i'r dyfro-
edd, cyma'r dodd o Dewch yr Argiwydd
sydd yn galw," is full OF beautiful imag-
cry and hard words and nearly exhaust
ed font of 'td's" in the composition
Norr5sto,Un Herald.
ASTRONOMERS tell us IN their own SIM
pie ineligible way that the gradual
lengthenirg OF the days is due to the
"obliquity of the ecljptic to the terres-
trial horizon" This ought to set at rest
the foolish idea that the days are longer
because the sun rises earlier and sets
later, -PittsLurg Telegraph.
STOCK gambling is much older than
some people suppose. They forget that
Moses owed his whole success in life to
being caught in one of the bull rushes
on the Niie.-Bosto,, Transcript. We
have also heard at some time past that
Pharaob's daughter aleo got q little
prophet out OF them.-BoSto', Post.
FIRST tramp-"Bill, wot's them fell
lers with thick shoes and bundles
strapped onto their backs ?" Second
tramp" Them's pedestrians. First
tramp--"And whot in - is pedes-
TRAMP Second tramp GA pedestrian
is amatoor tramp; les chin 'em fur ter
baker. ."-Boston Commercial Bulletin.
On, .yea, we know how to cast gloom
over man. If we just want to agonizs
him we say: 81 cut mighty pleasant
notice OF you out of come paper this
morning, but I've lost it. And then
he frantically wants to know what paper
it was and We can't remember, and it
drives him nearly to madness. Boston
Post.
81 can't pay that bill Just now; you
will have to wait a little for the money"
:" ALI right SIR" cheerfully responded
the boy, as he sested himself and un-
folded copy of the morning paper.
"Them's the orders OF the boss. !" "What
are the orders OF the boss ?" demanded
the gentleman, sternly. "I'm to wait
for the money"
ONE reason, undoubtedly, why the
young man awaits the boating season
with SO much impotence is that he can
take his girl out sailing, and repeat the
old, old conundrum, "Shall / hug the
shore" expecting the delicious answer.
'If there isn't nythiug nea1er than that
which will answer the purpose" Bur.
Itn9ton Free Press.
Iris morning woman applied at the
surrogate's office for letters of ndminis-
tra'ion on her husbands estate-the es-
tate being claim of a few dollars
against the city. ''Did your husband
leave any personal proper,y?" asked
Surrogate Lord. s'Indeed, he did re-
Piled the widow, '.three boys and two
girls. Troy Times.
Miss AMELIA ARTEEb {who has lust
returned from trip abroad for several
years) =" Why, Mr.. st. Olair, / mis-.
took that gentleman with whom I was
conversing, for you 1" Mr.. st. Clair
with disgust):-" What! that ienowa.
mus? how howwible /" Mis- Amelia
arteel-" Aud 1 thought how much
you had improved. "-Boston Post.
A RECENT advertisement read as fol-
lows: 'lf the gentlemen who keeps the
shoe store with red head will. return
Inc umbrella of young lady with whale.
bone RIBS and an iron handle to the
slate rooted g,ocer's shop he Will hear
81 something to his advantage as the
same is gift of deceased mother now
!, 20 ;, more, With the name engraved on
"ls THERE dude club ia this cit,p,
asked stranger, entering the editorial
room. There is returned the editor.
IS ne produced toothpick from his
pocket and laid it OIL the roll.iop desk:
that's it, and the frst dnde that shows
his head in this flee will be brsined
With it." With a deep sigh the stranger
turned and disappeared. Someryisie
''I,LL bet they are marriea, y whis.,
pered Tom TO Charley, in reference TO a
couple on the other side of the car
They haven't spoken ten worde, either
Of them, since they came in, and not so
much az "a single smile las lighted up
bis face OF hers. Yes, sir, yon can make