Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-03-13
They Fell.

Two delegates to the Grand Conro-
cation Of the Sons of Ice Water were
sitting in the lobby of the Windsor. in
the city of Denver, not long ago,
| strangers to each other and to ever
body else. One came from Huerferno
| county and the other was delegate
from the Ice Water Encampment of
Correjos county.
From the beautiful billiard hall came
the sharp rattle of ivory balls, and in
the bar-rOom there was 4 glitter of
| electric light, cut glass and French
plate mirrors. Out of the door came
the merry laughter of the giddy throng,
favored with fragrant Havana smoke
and the delicate odor of lemon and
| mirth and pine apple and cognac.
The delegate from Correjos felt lone
ly, and he turned to the Ice Water
representative from Huerferno:
''1hat was bold and fearless speech
you made this afternoon on the demon
rum at the cOnvocation.
''Think SOP" said the sad Huerferno
man.
Eyes, you entered into the descrip-
ton of rum S maniac till / could almost
see the red-eyed centipedes and tropi-
cal hornets in the air. How could YOU
describe the jimjams so graphically"
Well. you see, I'm a reformed drunk
ard. Only little while ago l was in
he gutter
$50 was l."
Glow long ago?"
''Week ago day after tomorrow.
Next Tuesday it II be q week since
I quit"
well, | swami
"Ain't it funny?"
"Tolerable.'
Its going to be long, cold winter;
don't YOU think SOP"
Yes, dread it a good deal"
s'Its comfort, though. to know
that you never will touch rum again"
Yes, [ am glad in my heart to-
night that L am free from it. 1 shall
never touch rum again
When he said this he looked up at
the other delegate, and they looked
into each others eyes earnestly as
though each would read the others
soul. Then the Hueferno man said:
I'm fact, | never did care much for
rum"
Then there was a long pause.
Finally the Correjos man ventured:
do you have to use IN antitode to
cure the thirst?"
Eyes, I've had to rely on that a
good deal at first. Probably this vain
yearning that [ now feel in the pit of
the bosom will disappear after awhile"
''Have you got any antidote with
your"
Eyes, I've got some up in 232 1-2.
If you'll come up I'll give YOU a dose"
There's no rum in it, is there?"
NO"
Then they went up the elevator.
They did not get down to breakfast,
but at dinner they stole in. The man
from Huerferno lodged nervousIv
through the archway leading to the
dining-room as though he had doubts
about getting through so small space
with his augmented head, and the man
from Correjos looked like one who had
wept his eyes almost blind over the
woe that rum has wrought in our fair
land.
When the waiter asked the delegate
from Correjos for his dessert order,
the red-nosed Son of Ice Water said:
Bring me cup of tea, some pudding
without wine sauce, and q piece of
mince pie. You may also bring me u
cork-screw, if you please, to pull the
brandy out of the mince pie with
Then the two reformed drunkards
looked at each other and laughed a
hoarse, bitter and joyous laugh.
At the afternoon session of the Sons
of Ice Water the Huerferno delegate
couldn't get his regalia over his head.
Bill Nye, IN NeaO Y0r5 Mercury.