Morning journal and courier., 1884-07-05
PUNK.

The small boy likes to listen to the music of the banjo because it is punk, punk. k."- N. Y. Journal.
 Five thousand molecules can sit com- cortabIy on the point of pin" Herein the molecule differs materially from man.-Nor- .ristown Herald.
 A medical journal takes two columns to tell wakeful people how to go to sleep. Hah. we know good way; try to keep awake. - Burlington HaSkeye.
 How can you tell when a watermelon is ripe ?-[ [aousekeeper l When 8 melon is ripe the seeds are black Examine the seeds Philadelphia Call.
 After the nomination, what 2" asks 8 Democratic contemporary. Why, Butler, of course He's after anything he thinks he can catch.-New York Journal.
 Mary Anderson says she could not love a man who did not possess the highest mental attainments. Oh, come now, Mary, stop limiting and propose. This is leap year. Philadelphia Call
 sWon't some newspaper please print pun on FIower?' asks exchange The editor rash enough to commit such an inde- scretion should be shot with Flowers Pisth. -Norlistown Herald.
 The temperature of our bodies when nor nal is about 99 1-2 degrees, and it frequently jamps at one bound to 150. The latter is when someone steps on your sore corn Philadelphia Chronicle-Herald.
 '.No," said Mrs. Jones, proprietress of the Marine Villa. Villasville-on-the coast No, we ain't got no malaria, but my daugh- ter Sally makes lemon pies which can't be beat nowhere round these parts"
 "Look here, waiter!'' cried Crimsonbeab, who was stopping for few days at Coney Island; 'sthis ham is not so good as what got here last summer" I don't see why," replied the waiter, in some surprise; tits the same ham, sir!" Crimsonbeak leaves with out partaking, and wondering why he didn't think of that before.-Yonkers Statesman. Fashionable Miss-"Will you let me have a sample of that old gold flannel and also one of the mauve color?"
 Clerk-''No, you don't.''
 Fashionable Miss-'.I beg pardon; did not understand you"
 Clerk-''Thas dodge has been played too often"
 Fashionable Miss -"What dodge. pray ?"
 Clerk-s.You want to make bathing suit of them. ."-Philadelph Call.
 Young lawyer (much elsted)-'Mr. Coke, congratulate me! You know told you had a case? We'll sir, I've won it. Yes, sir, &C., tually won my first easel" Coke Gan old law yer)-sYou're excusable under the circum stances; but with little experience you may yet do honor to your profession. "-Y Young under the circumstances! don't understand your meaning, Mir. Coke" Coke-s.Don't understand! Listen: If you had been 8 lawyer of experience, you would have lost that case; then YOU would advise your client to appeal, and if skiIlfully managed, it might have been made to last for years or at le4 st as long as he had any money. But you have won, and that's the end of it. Let it be 8 lesson to you in future. .''-Boston Transcript Full many 6 foolish man who thinss he's safe. The dangsr-hunting, treach rous hAmmeeks
 bear; Full many c chap will wildly fu me and chafe, When, overturned, he vainly claws the air. No longer will be seek to take 8 dozs Within the net conducive to nod; For well the upsss weary WandeFer knows The hammocks hardened h1Rmocks on the
 }aod New York Journal.