Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-09-02

an ldea that Judge Is going toslrip Ile
Court House on his back and fetch it up
here at day light to thy law caso?'
"But you said You wanted to get up
carly" reasoned Mrs, Spoopendyke,
land it's pretty early now"
"D'ye sposo l wanted to got up at
midnight TO practice?" propounded Mr..
Spoopondykc. "Think law case is
Ike church-sociable, tho first man
there gets tho best supper? P'raps you
were afraid if I didn't start carly 1
wouldn't get seat. The mcasly CONT
don't meet till 10 o'clock, dod CAST it;
and here you wake me up at 4 ! What
dye suppose witness is, anyhow"
shouted Mr.. Spoopendyke, getting mad
der and madden. "Think he's dark
lantern, and goes around with his slide
tancd and the smoke coming out of the
top? Dye know what n court is?"
"Why, yes, )" said Mrs. Spoopenlyke,
ga court is place where they hang
people. Mrs. Meterhof-"
"Fhats it You struck it first clip"
sputtcred Mr.. Spoopen !yke. "With
chat information, oil you want is plug
hat and an adjournment to bel lawyer.
If 1 had your Intelligence and bald
head, I'd hire out for Judge at board
wages. tell We court is a place where
they try cases about land, and licking
people, and contracts, and-and-di-
vorce cases. Yes, indeed" continued
Ir. Spoopcndyke, solemnly, "they try
livorcc cases about women waking their
husbands up in the dead Of night"
"What kind of law case IRE you go
ing to witness ?" inquired Mrs. Spoopen-
lyke.
"a daylight case You understand
that? At 10 o'clock, and not 5. Got
that through your head? Think you
can remember ~ o'clock? II you can't
can you remember II, or noon2"
"Do they hove cases overy hour -
queried Ms. Spoopendyke.
"Of course they do They leave
every fifteen minutes, like ferryboat,
and if l can't catch one case I'll DO wit
ness in another. Got it nov? Only
they don't run as often from midnight to
6. Begin to see into it2"
"I think do" said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, eliminating. az was thinking that
if one started at 8 o'clock, I'd go and
witness with you"
"Oh, you'd make witness !" pro-
claimed Mr.. Spoopendyke. "With
your capacity for observing and ability
to recollect,. you would only want to
appear twice to absorb the whole wit
ness business" and, with this reflection,
Mr.. Spoopendyke went back to his
slumbers.
At 10 o'clock sharp his wife called |
him and notified him of the hour.
"How'm going to get there in time ?
Why didn't you call me before? Want
me sent to State prison for contempt?
Want to get rid of me, don't you?'
and Mr.. Spoopendyke darted into his
clothes.
Don't you want some breakfast, my
dear?" inquired Mrs. Spoopendyke,
tenderly.
ono, 1 don't want any measly break
fast, he shouted. Didn't 1 tell ye
was witness at 10, and now it's half
past. Think man is appointed witness
during good behavior? S'pose hold
the Office till my successor is appointed"
and Mr.. Spoopendyke plunged down
stairs and ont of the house.
~ only did what hetold ne to, sighed
Mrs. Spoopcndykc, wctting II piece Of
'ourt-l,lastor aud patching up hole in
her silk drcss. Though | don't see
any use of man being witness If he
can't be witness when he wants to. II
were man," she continued, as she
Topped down on the floor to change her
boots, "Td get appointed by the Presi-
dent, and then could attend to business
or not, as liked" with which sage re-
Election Mrs. Spoopendyke pulled out
her husbands socks and began to sew
wens three inches in diameter on the
heels.