The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1884-01-11
FOOLISHNESS.

"Aunty, vat makes the little baby cry
SOP Do it wants its mudder?" "Yes.
dear, and its fodder, too!'
When man kicks a can of nitro
glycerine he gets large amount of in
formation, but so suddenly that 1t does
him no good.
In passing sentence upon two rogues.
Philip of MacedOn ordered one to leave
Macedonia with all speed, and the 9TH
er to try and catch him.
81 say Jenkins. can you tell young.
tender chicken from an old tough one? ?"
"Of course, can swell. howp by
the teeth" "Chickens have no teeth"
mo, but have"
A young man says he is going to at
tempt the feat Of going forty days with
out working. He says if his employers
don't watch him he thinks he can ac-
complish the task.
Somewhat to himself; "Can you tell
me-" asked Cortland man Of his tailor.
how you came to get this coat 80 tight ?"
"Oh, yes, sir. The fact is you were
tight when l measured you."
Dear Louise, don't let the men come
too near to you when courting" "Oh,
no, dear ma. When Charles is here we
bave a chair between u.s." Mother
thinks the answer is rather ambiguous.
Notwithstanding soda water fire.
quently explodes heavy copper gene
rator and blow drug store into splint-
ers. the gentle girl calmly swallows
goblet after goblet of it, while it is the
young man along with her who gets
busted"
Johnnie, did anyone have the Group
in your house last night?" Dunno!
What made you AK mep" Well, / saw
light in your house long after mid
hight" "Ohl that'smy sister She has
something down in the parlor awful
late every night, but 1 don't know
whether 1t is the Group or not"
A stock-broker, returning to his office
after substantial luncheon with cli-
ent, SAID, complacently, to his head
clerk, "Mr Putkin. the world looks diff
ferent to man when he has bottle
of champagne in him." "Yes, sir" re-
piled the clerk significantly, and he
looks different to the world"
A lady and gentleman were engaged
to he married, and they one day be-
guiled the 6.issful tedium of court
ship by talking over the names Of their
future children. They got along very
well until they came TO the name Of
their fourth child, and over that they
quarreled so violently that the match
was broken off.
".Why, old boy, what's the matter
with yop You look as though you had
lost your best friend" "DoI?" was the
reply. "Well, l haven't. On the con-
trary, have just gained a friend"
"You don't look it." IL know 1 don't,
You see, last night l asked little Miss
B. to marry me, and she said she would
always be to me very dear friend"
A North Hill man tripped on rug
at the door Of his bedroom, slid down a
long flight of stairs, crashed through a
glass door, down the stone door steps.
rolled across the yard out through the
open gate, crossed the sidewalk on the
dead slide and brought up like an av-
alanche against tree box. BY heav-
en-" he said as he limped back to the
house, that tree box might have been
the death of me. If can find the child
who left that gate open I'll wear out q
skate strap on him." And he did.
"My,poys, 'sald German sergeant toa
squad of United States regulars, II wish
you to understands dot am Won Of de
pest hearted vellers in de world. Don't
you peleeve dotp" "0h, yes sir" an
swered the members of the squad. Dots
all right. I am de pest hearted vell-
er in de world except ven I'm ON duty.
und ven I'm on duty, I'm peast. Isn't
dot so, poysP" "Yes," family replied
the squad. "Dot's all right, too. Und.
now, shust remember, poys, I'm always
on duty"
"Fourthly," said a hard-shelled Bap-
tist preacher who was trying to destroy
all the beauty in nature and art fourth
ly. brethren, we come to beautiful wo-
men. They are snare to our foot
steps, constant Eve in our garden of
eden, an allurement to worldliness, u
temptation to lead us into fashion and
display. Yes, brethren, look for your
selves, and tell me what is the state to-
day of beautiful women" "Kain-
| tueky, be gawd. sab," snorted out man
over in the corner OF the church, and
the preacher had to 60 on to fifthly fog
change,