The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-05-31
RECIPE FOR RULING MEN.
A Lecture TO Women by Woman Who Has
Studied Mankind.


Lecture to Women by Woman Who Has
Studied Mankind.
Chicago News
II do not entertain much said lady who has
been an acknowledged leader of Chicago society
for twenty five years, but | receive good deal
| do not believe in entertainment although am
mindful that there is very much stress laid upon
the sociahty of refreshments People do not
call you for eatables; they can buy their lunch
anywhere. But the society of a cultivated lady
or gentleman is not so easy of access. People
want mental food; they want to exchange their
ideas for newer ones; they want to talk and
laugh, and to make you talk and laugh; they
want the society of some sweet women OF sense
and vivacity, who will skillfully draw them into
conversation, and for the time being drecttheir
thoughts from the subjects that have engrossed
them all day The woman who has to appeal to
her table-who thinks she must panper the APP
petites of her guests in order to pease-openly
confesses that she is not accustomed to society,"
and not equal to its demands.
Besides, look at the way women entertain
nowadays! What does a man care for ices cake
frappe and boulonl Truly their own observa-
ton should teach them better. | can get more
real social enjoyment and create more convivial-
ity with dozen sandwiches and two quarts of
cider or hot coffee than | can with ten pounds of
angels food and three gallons of ice cream. |
have been in society for twenty five years, and
when | have received my most charming com
panies all | served was tea and waters. If there
were gentlemen present | substituted coffee.
am a great admrer of card parties and musicales
with not more than ten in the group. About 10
o'clock | invite them TO the dining room and re
fresh them without ceremony have dish of
salad and some nice bread and butter, with Il
pickle or an olive and cup of hot coffee More
often | simply put u big dlshful OF nice sand
witches in the center of the little table and have
half a dozen bottles of ale brought in right from
the ice box That is what men like, and il you
mean to please them that is one of the menus to
i 60 Ill
freshments in the morning or afternoon. for 10
we'll bred person expects it unless invited espec
tally to spend the day. If you ask him to dine
with you. then serve an elegant dinner
81 think if women only knew how sweet and
lovely they are. and how much they can do with
men they would pay more attention to their per
sonal cultivation than they do. Why. if Il wo-
man only goes about it right she can do anything
with man, and make him conform to her IDEAS
in every particular. She has tact, skill, talent
beauty refinement, and. combine her intuition
with her fascinating powers, she can change his
politics, reform his religious ideas, alter the
whole course of his life, and shape his career to
to suit herself. But she must not be fool, l
can tell you, must she forget for an
instant the art and fnesse by which she rules
"Man is at best brusQue, selfish, impulsiVe
creature, full of conceits and va5aries, and anx-
iOus to rule and control. He has strength and
he wants to use it; he has creative faculties and
lives to execute, But whatever he is he looks TO
woman for his pleasures and the one who can
please him can rule him and do with him what
she will A woman is young until she IS TWEEN
ty-five, and a man retains his youth ten years
longer but after that there is nothing to live for
but home Life has lost its zcst, and there is no
charm in the toys and amusements Of yester-
day You must admit that a woman marrics
for convenience. She wants a home. protection
immunity from labor, and the delights of com
panionship Now if a man makes this home, If
he stands between her and danger. if he con
tributes the best interests of his life for her
ha aiuiI- ont tO
ward. He wants his home beautifed, flied
with friends and good cheer; he wants to be
petted, admired, respected, encouraged and
loved He wants to be king in short.
oh yes, you may say petting is all nonsense.
but Just let me tell you that you are mistaken.
and if the husband cannot get that loving affec-
ton at home he will get it some place else. Ca
resses can be bought like every other luxury.
"A wife must be a sweetheart all her life. She
must never get too old to be charming She
must cultivate sweet temper and an atfable
manner and her only anxiety must be dread of
offending her husband. Another thing: sarcasm
won't work; it is an unpardonaole oiiense IN the
home circle, and no matter how pertinent 1t may
be, a woman can not afford ever to say harsh
word to the man she loves.
beautiful No woman need be anything
else If she has poor complexion, there are
powders and cosmetics that defy detectiOn; she
can have beautiful eyeashes and eyebrows;
matter how poor and coarse her hair is, it
be remarkably well-kept and so becomingly ar
ranged as to be admired the most irregular
teeth can be polished like so many pearls, and
clean teeth and a sweet breath are not so com
mon as to be despised; white hands and taper
ing polished nails will atone for very Ill shape
of hand. What if the feet are large, if they are
well shodl If the figure is poor, it can he so
clean so healthy looking, and so delicately per
fumed that your very presence will be whole
some and refreshing. and, | tell you, clothes
make the refinement that belongs to lady or
gentleman. Indeed, the raiment is typical of
much that is within. If nature has meagery
bestowed her charms that is the very
reason why woman should have re
music painting, or the sciences, she can become
a pleasant if not brilliant talker. She can
read and observe and be an authority on current
literature. and if she will but study the why
and wherefore of things and the very best points
in her friends, she can make for herself a circle
that will be the very envy of her prettiest com
petitor.
For instance. we will suppose she Is invited
to theater or concert Let her procure pro
gramme in advance and make a study of the
play. the actors, the music, or the artists. Let
her have some interesting matter to talk about
The gentleman goes to the expense of the enter
tainment and has right TO expect that the lady
he has favored will show her appreciation in
some way.
Natural! Oh, hate natural people! They
are rude curt needless and presumptUous /
like people to anticipate my pleasures like
to hear them say pretty things to use pretty
language. and to acquire pretty manners, One
need not necessarily be hypocrite, but if there
is any choice ! prefer the polite hypocrisy of the
French to the rude candor Of the BritenS'
Canker Worms and Lager Beer.