Daily Republican. [volume] ([Wilmington, Del.]) 1874-1890, 1884-10-15
MIRTH AND APARTMENT.

VI IL II A MI IN Nh M AVA CN
Blossum WAS calling on Miss Arabella,
nut an the iatter's young brother per.
listed In staying 10 the parlor the con-
,ersation seemed TO flag. Finally In
BlOssum drew out his
satch, and, In order to break the pain
'ul silence, asked 4: "Miss Arabelia, can
vou tell mo what--that Ia when-II
mean do you know Why your face 10
like the face OF this watch ?" IL
interrupted the youngster,
- 1t 10 because its enaineled but
when the matinee oct ween brother and |
sister mad closed, Blossum vas about :
two blocks away.
Young collector: "Here is . very an
cient little piece OF Chinese ivory, evil |
IDENTIFY Of some historic value, and l
Ouly paid ten dollars for 1t. Can you
translate the inscription f0- Ee?"
Professor (after profound study Il
" This, sir, IL u laundry check. The
inscription In an English ono written In
Chinese characters, and says, mo mon
ey, no wsshee.' Young collector
does not say that be has promised 20
take two more at the same price II the
dealer can secure them tor him.
They bad only been married short
time. The other day she slung her arm
around him aud warbled, IN .
10 y tremulous voice "Do you realize.
Adolphus, that now We are only one z"
" No." replied the brute. az can't re.
slixe II. have just paid q millinery
bill and . lot more Of your bills, with
several outside precints TO hear from |;
10 am beginning 10 realize that, ~
far ~ exp nse goes, instead OF being
one, We are about half q dozen,"
1--WE are lost everything 10 gone
he exclaimed, A. he wrung his hands
and paced the floor. Not everything,
Charles" interrupted his weeping wife
1.-THE furniture Is pawnod, be cou.
unued 1.-The jswelry 10 pawned, and
now tho clothes of our backs. cannot
get work, and We shall starve.
Don't despair. Charles. Recollact
you Istill have mo left" l don't see
how that helps much. 1 can't pawn
you"
Mrs. Judge Carpenter Of Texas made
arrAp gem nts to hire . colored lady &c
do the cooking, or ut least she thought
she had made arrangements but sht
vas mistaken, 81 do my own.market
ling. and shall expect you TO accom-
pany me- said Mrs. Carpenter, DER
We can. agree" returned the colored
liady, Al nebber allows myself ter b
seen on de streets IN company Wild any
body who carries basket"
u A brave little boy found broker
leeper ON the railway line, ard per
IceivinR tho peril in which the trair
would be placed II 1t should come dash
ing past without warning. sat out OF
the fence for Ave long hours in the DIT
ter winter cold, In order that he nigh
. carry the 6rst news Of the accident T.
his father, who In lOcal editor of pape
pub lished In the neig hooring village.
$50 you have got twins at you
: bouse ?" said Bexum DO to little Tomm
Sam uelson. Yes, mama, two Of EN-:
/ /" What are you going to call them .
: 4" Thunder and Lightning" why
thoae are strange names TO call Chi
dren." +" Well, that's what Pr Gale
} them 'as soon as he heard they were
l. the house"
The other night 0 little boy at
theatre WAS observed TO gaze long
the respectable looking old gentlema
r sitting in the orchestra chairs. At 10
he said: Pa, wish would hurry u
and get bald-headed. why. m
son p" Because then l could slwa!
: cit on the front row Of chairs.
Fl "How many lenses are there
asked . teacher Of boy. Seven
4 answered the boy 1.-THE present, q
) perfect. the imperfect. the .pluperfet
"a the FIRST future, the second future, ~
= she. :" what tense is hs ?" "Oh." !
Piled the boy, "hs's iptenas."
p! "Pray. "said Mr. to sentiema
n you have the goodness to take my gre
is coat in your carriage to town 2" wi
Ii great pleasure, my dear sir, but nc
- v Ill you get 1t again 2" On, We
=: easily" replied the modest applica'
n. shall stay In II"
Smith (who had forgetfully left
~ purse on the plano lAst niah) M
W YOU found An thing this morning, a
on Ssiina ?" ION, yes, dear, thanks |
les have ordered new music stooi, 20
nd lace curtains, and such love OF . o.
re net"
I'M ~. "How is your son TO- day?" aske'
friend OF stock broker. very II
replied the gentleman, struggling
maintain composure, tears coots'
: down his agitated featurss-" very
:. would not give ten per cent ior
a. IN chance for life"
nd Tho cruelty of womaE's critici
ter sometimes goes beyond life. DID
out ever see . more natural corpse u
ms Mrs. Podson?" asked lazy OF
~ friend. "Such = contented smil
Contented smi,e," repeated
~ friend. at was all put on"
ap- A crusty old fellow once ask
tile What is the reason that grin
nos no dragons, and devils are ladies' favo
i ,nr subiects for embroidery design
IL - An. because they are continu'
= thinking of their husbands" was
LII lady's quick retort.
tor Clara, / love but thee alone.
rsi. iced. I speak the truth I" He pause
eli the blush o'erspread her cheek.
In let him draw her near. Scarce
!; emotion could she speak. Yet still
W.. asked. In accents meek: How N
ASY have you q year ?"
, nr% A pretended ghost made It's APT
viii snce In country town the other nl
1. T. and accidentally ran against .
lst dog. Tho result Of the encou
-. established boy all doubt that
ny, ny was nothing supcrstitious about
Or. dog.
'las When we see tightly laced wo
70 trying to enjoy . good laugh vi
smile on her mouth and tears In
OTIS leyes, We think Of what Byron say
eond his opening lines on tho Bait
deep w Aterlso !" Let JOY be unconfinet
ErH "shall I sing Far Away p"
sm asked. a her fingers sought the ke
. Yes. l think you had BETTER" ht
NE piled" unless you want the neigi
S1so 70 make complaint" He dossn''
y at IL there now.
q. st 4, nm .oka ,rv HEARTH eiaguat