Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1884-04-03

party. Do y'r moind that, Henry p
Boston Post.
Texas wedding notice Bob Mcdonald
and Sue Mitchell have decided to slide
down the cellar door Of life hand in-hAud
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Dispatch.
There are few ignoramuses left in the
world. One Of them asks us II this
Greedy search party is going in search OF
Horace Greeley. --Bosto, Post
Queen City girl eating souse
When the note that she reached
As she stood up and screecded
Would have drawn $40. 0OU house.
-Boston Fbiio.
A 1re broke ont in Louisville church
during services last Sunday. It was with
great difficulty that several Of the con-
gregaiion were awakened in time to save
their lives -Nep York Graphic
Sir Rome
To the music dreamy and sweet,
think you might
Sep a little moe Hight
And less frequently on my feet.
1mpeounious debtor "l've boon
haunted by ghosts all day" As Robin
son enters with his little bill-"And
here comes another spectre" Robinson
-" There's where you're mistaken, my
boy, I'm au expeoter. Life.
"Hs stood six feet two ip his stockings,
and every Inch man." says an ex.
change. HIM That is "a inches !;
'every inch a man." would make "a
men. This must bs the came Identical
customer who was "host In himself -
The Judge.
country correspondent of New
Hampshire weekly writes among lot of
local items: "Lsnt commenced In this
Town on Ash Wednesday, Feb 81" We
are glad to learn that Lent began in that
town the same day that it did in other
places --Bo'ton Post.
Lost your grip 7" Philadelphia
drummer ssked his colleague who WAS
looking very dismal on the train. "No,"
replied the man from Market street,
looking sadly at the pretty eis. three
sests front, whose side he had juSt left,
"I've got the sack "--Burl,nqton Haukeye.
1t Is saii the wives OF all American
humorists are invalids. Thank God we
amt married. At that rate we'd have
laid about 10 blooming females away in
the hungry earth during the time we've
been shooting around the horizon Of
alleged funniness. democrat Broad Are
Exaspersted in the Dignt by Is, II is
said, Dubuque man went out on his
back porch, swung heavy club to let fl
at them, caught it in the long tail OF lis
| night shirt, knocked himself down the
steps, and broke his ara. Such per.
formance as that ought to have scared the
cats Boston Post.
young man applied for position In
DOCTORS office. "What can you do ~
asked the physician. al KANT dc
nothin' yet, but l want to lsrn how to
hack off legs. Got a nst'ral hankerin
| for SIGH work. Cat one o. the Pendleton
boys all ter pieces tother day, 80 pap he
lowed I'd better be a doctor -Arkansdl
| Traveller.
LIST poets sing of gentle spring,
Tine joys that birds and flowers bring,
! The woods that with wild echoes ring,
The sky and all that sort of thing,
la rhymes which have no reason;
But a. for me, when, like a bee,
seek for sw -etness, fancy free,
And dart my glance with savage glee
At bashful SWANS who start and fiee
| Give me the leap-yeaI season.
". y. Morning Journal.
While an Indiana edit,T va. hons SICK
with typhoid fever and his wife and it'll,
daughter we're suffering at the same time
with diphtleris and scarlatiua, the offic.
boy clipped and published "a a leader
the following medical note: "Typh ID
fever, diphtheris, and scsrlatius are tht
results OF human ignorance, stupidity
lazness and filth, rather THAI visitatioNi
of God "--NeV York Commercial Adrer
tiser.
Chicago man who attend the Italian
opera, when asked how he liked II, re
| Piled 81 diGp't know exactly what tn,
singing meaut, but the n0ise sounded 81
much like being on change and out /,
the stock yArds and pork packing estab
lishments, liked it awfully. It Was
sort OF evening" rehearsal and COL d al a
tion OF the business of the day you
know" And the man went of with hi
Handkerchief to his nose. humming 81
air from Bridgeport .-Eeck'S Sun.
besutiful young lady, elegant,
dressed and worth 100000, appeared ii
the Toombs police court, New York, Lar
Tuesday, az a witness, She was mucI
Interested in the famous old court, an
gazed earnestly at six young men, sittin
in q box. Even as she gazed, sh
shuddefed, aud a little moan broke fror
her lips. "Are those hardened lookiu
younP men prisoners Z" she asked "Ol
no, ms'am," replied the justice, great
shocked, "those are the reporters for til
morning papers" The young lady said sh
would like to go and look at the dungeon
immediately Burlington Hapkeye.
The Japanese language has no equivi
lent for our word hell, but 1t has Ii
word jigoku. Jisoku consists OF "(l
eight immense hot hells ranging OF
beneath the other in tiers. Esch OF thef
bells has Is additional hells outside Il
gates, like 80 many sntechambers, so thu
there are in all 1856 hot hells. (2) Thei
are eight large cilu bells, aud 80 thei
are the same number o. bells of utt,
darkness" This Is valuable information
Jigoku is just the word we have bee
looking for, to give concise idea of Il
situation when We arrive at the theat
and fud We have left our tickets at HON
8 boston ioS
TwbTnIE EYEs-Bo- DEAU.
!, Two idle eyes where soft romance
i SHOWS ~ each su !den, gilish glance
y Are looking straight at me and STIR
The sentimental messenger
To string his Row add set hts lance.
J., Down in their DEPTHS the love lights ,anoo
- And tease me IN a hap traro.
Where drpwsy Cupids gave me her
v To Idpiize.
= Beloved, in the wide expanse
s sSI sTsy res on% a9s In not ssanoe
/ These =, influential ztanxas were
- lnspi ed by you. They are, y reliance
Two idle lies.
a