Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1884-08-23
WANTED, A WIFE.

term. 1850, when ms attention was arrested
by a sharp rap at his door, Immediately fol-
lowed by the entrance of the wel-dressed
person of his college friend, Methven.
Come along in" said Horribly, and
light yourself pipe"
No thank ye, can't stop, replied Meth
ven. "as have lot to do this morning
but thought | would just run acros, and
tell YOU a bit of news. | have just arranged
a glorious hoax, at the expense, need
hardly say, of Old Crofton; he has become
too 'cpte lately to be caught by our old,
timc-honorcd Jokes and SO have arranged
the following plan: \ week ago | inserted
in the agony columns of the NOlninG 1duef-
fiScr 4 glowing matrimonial advertisement.
in which stated that the advertiser, who
WAS handsome, rich and all that sort of
thing. desired to meet with pretty and aC-
complishcd girl with view to matrimony.
All applicants were 70 send their photo
graphs the replies to be sent 10 II. c., No.
l5l St Giles, OXford-that's the house
where my scout lives, and so, of course, I
told him 70 bring me any letters thus adj
dressed. | got no reply for Il day or so, but
four days ago / received a letter from Il
damsel, who described herself rs young,
handsome and accomplished, inciosed me
the photograph of a very pretty girl, ended
by asking me when and where | should
meet her in town, and signed herself Miss
l.. Bernard, PiCcadilly Circus PoSt-otfice.
She also expressed desire to have the ad-
vertiser's photograph, 50 | promptly sent
her that of old Croltou which he had lately
given me, and said would write tonight
when and where | should meet her; 50 my
scheme is to somehow induce Crofton to
meet this girl. She will, of course, recOg-
Mise him by the photograph | have sent,
Will probably rush intoshis arms, the Kan
CARGO will be utterly OverpOwcredand there
will be an interesting denOuemcnt. Now,
Horribly, don't you think that magnificent
piece Of strategy
80, indeed, don't" said Hornby. Il
think it an internal shame; and what's
more, have half mind to go and tel the
Kangaroo Of the hoax
Oh, come now said Mcthven, you'd
never 10 that Jack, | know. Well, | can't
stay any longer, SO good-by for the pres
emit
There is not the very slightest doubt, that
if the iatcs had not interviewed, HOrnby
would have gone straight to CrOitun and
warned him of the impending hoax, and
this story would have never been written;
bur. as it happened, no sooner had Methyen
gone out OF Hurnby' rooms, than in rushed
the Secretary OF the College Cricket Club in
Il state OF breathiess anxiety. There was Il
match at | l:30; it was now II O'Clock and
he could only get together eight men, So
Homby was promptly enlisted, and by the
time the match was over, Metaven and his
scheme had entirely faded from his not too
retcutive memory. Methven, in the mean
time had gone straight to Croiton's rooms
Now. this Crofton, who was about to fall Il
victim to Mcthvcu's wileS, was the son of n
large Australian sheep farmer, and had
come up TO BraZcntGcc the previous OCtO-
Der. Like most CO!OnistS who have not
been 70 school in England, he was very
simple and unSophisticated and though
the Kangaroo, as he was generally called
was very popular, he was constantly being
made the victim of small practical Jokes
most of which were originated by Methvcn,
who WAS the professional hOaXer of Bra
zenlaUc. He always tOrgaVe them heartily,
and Joined in the laugh himself. How
ever. his one years residence in college
had opened his eyes little, and being nat
Uraly anything but Il fool, his friends
found il not quite 50 easy to take him in
now. IS it used 10 be, and several attempts
having lately failed, Mcthyen, To sustain
his Gwindling reputation rs a joker, had
connected the plan he had just disclosed to
Hornby. lie found the genial giant busily
packing his traps ready for going down the
next lav After chatting Il moment or two
the ,cnFtcr began:
As YOU re going to town tomorrow l
want Yuu to do me q little favor. ! prom
Used 10 meet girl, a cousin of mine to-
morrow. We had each got an order iorthe
House Of Commons. anu ! was 10 have cS-
Cprtcd her, and rs We meant to have little
lunch together at Lucas before We went in,
#.,f r.4r. .p