The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-07-08
A Bigger Fool.
brakes Travellers Magazine.

saw of the Little Rock q Fort Smlt
railroad, the old squatters, when tn
line of work began, curving aroun'
great mountains and creeping alon,
the grim and awful lodges of slate
were much concerned with regard t,
the enterprise, and, true to thei
"raisin'." were not disposed to lool
upon it with the progressive eye o
favor. One day when the workmer
began grading near the cabin of al
old fellow known as Coon-skin Pete
that worthy elector of a great com
monwealth came out, and approaching
one of the engineers, asked:
"What on 'arth air yer doin
cap'n?"
Building a railroad"
"Wall, l lowed yer was fingin'
up a sweet later ridge; Mur-thats
my wife-lowed yer was goin' ter
dam up the creek for the 'commoda-
ton o the beavers. and Dink-that's
my SIN. the one what bit the right
year often one O. the swamp boys-he
lowed yer wus doin' it fur fun. Now
sense yer mention it, / b'lieve thar
wus a passel o fellers long here
sOmetimer' 90 dragin' coon chain an
takin' sight with a t'ree-leg stool
engagements. Railroad, Ell? Have
yer got ernuff rails?"
1--WE will have enouch."
81 lowed if yer didIt. I'd split
yer a passel fur two dollars an er
half er thousan'; that's cheaper'n you
ken buy 'em any whar else in this
here community. l wouldn't make
the offer, but Mur's tolks-four strap
pin boys an er powerful gals a
visitin' us, an l mout as well put
'em ter work"
"You don't understand" replied
the engineer, amused at the old fellow.
| don't mean fence-rails but iron ON
which steam cars are run"
"Wall !" opening his eyes. eyer
don't mean that yer air goin' ter
have steam cars here, do yer?"
"Oh, yes; we'll have them here
now in a very short time"
can yer won't have 'em here but
a short time, nuther."
"why?"
THE Simmons boys'll steal 'em,
that's why"
"They couldn't steal a locomotive.
Couldn't they wall they just
could. Teller named Jones started a
saw.mill in this neigbbOrhood some
time ergo, an one mornin' when he
woke up he foun' that the thing WIS
dun gone. Arter a while, he foun' it
way over in Pennyville holler, sswin.
fur the Simmons boys, fit ter kill
hisse'f. Don't talk ter me erbout the
Simmons boys, stranger, FIR | never
seed nothin' yet whut they couldn't
steal"
"We'll risk it. Say, my friend,
where can we find some good water?
II never seed no good water"
"Wbat do you drink ?"
Anything you've got handy"
throwing out a chew of tobacco.
Excuse me | didn't ask you to
drink. How's that spring down
there? Water good enough to drink"
"Some folks drinks it.
"How far is it to Berry's Covep
Hundred miles or So"
"What, from here ?"
"Oh, no, not fruu here ; yer did
not say frum here"
"Well, how far is it from here?"
eyer can make it as fur as yer
please"
"Well, then, since you're so par
ticular, how near is it ?"
''Oh, / amt particular, stranger.
It's twenty-five yards"
"What, from heIe?"
No, not frum here. Yer didn't
ask now rear frum-"
Look herel"
That's wbar I'm lookin'."
why dont you answer question
squarely?"
"Why don't yer ak it squar 2"
The engineer sat for a time drum
ming on the end of log and smoking
his pipe. After awhile, looking up,
he asked:
There are number of bluffs be-
tween here and Berry's Cove, aren't
they?"
"Now your shoutin'. Twixt here
an thar lives an ole Teller named
Jack Spoilers. He's the bigges' bluff
yer ever seed, but it's all bluff. FL
yer sit down with him he'll try ter
bluff yer, but keep yer eye on the
cards an hole him down. l amt no
great snakes at poker, but he couldn't
bluff me"