The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1884-07-09
HE ACTED AS UMPIRE.
A Rock Island Gentleman Tells an
ArgusRep0rter His First Expe-
rience as an Umpire.

Ever umpire game of base ball ?" ask
eda gentleman of the reporter this morning
Not recently" answered the man of
news. Did you?"
"Yes," sighed the gentleman. Il did.
but shall never be so foolish again. l
am great admirer of the national game
but know about the rules of the game
as hog does about scientific warfare. /
was taking little stroll the other after
noon when upon the bluff l came across
a crowd of urchins who were in earnest
conversation about something. As |
drew near them, one of them shouted
Here mister you umpire this game, will
ye?" After learning that the Rustlers'
and the Hustlers' were going to decide
the knotty problem as to which was the
better base ball club / consented to UNI
pire the game. So the game was called,
and at it the opposing factions went.
The youngster in the box sent in as hot
an outcurveias could Corcoran or Mullane,
and the youth catcher took it in and
wheeling about shouted: How's that MIR
Umpire?' zone ball!' was our decision
There was ripple of rebellion from one
nine and a murmur of applause and ap-
probation from the other, and the game
proceeded. 1.-TWO balls, three. four; one
strike, five, six; two strikes" and then a
doubtful ball and hesitated for a second,
That's seven balls" shouted an adherent
of the striker. f'Air you the umpire p
queried another lad of the party who had
usurped that dignitary's prerogative.
Nav, but its seven balls, hain't it, Mr..
Umpire?' and then he gave me look as
much as to say you'd better say yes OF
we'll send you home labelled so that your
friends can't recognize you and deeming
prudence the better part of valor | told
the striker to take his base, and another
youth stepped up and called for a low
| ball which was duly announced to the
pitcher and the game proceeded. The
striker hit it for two bases and there was
| as much excitement as could be gotter
up over close game between two league
| nine. The next strike hit a foul anC
second baseman said "How's this Mr.
Umpire, this man amt on his base
Stay there" was the decision
and just then the pitcher made
feint with his empty right hand anG
mines boys said "How's that for balk 2
After struggle the game proceeded and
! in one, two, three order whitewash was
Tailed. The opposing nine started il
with vim that betokened success ol
death and after have received two fou
tips in the stomach and one in the eSe
and has been threatened with annihila
ton by the captain of one of the mines
three men were declared out, coincidine
and the "Ruselers" went to bat with
score of nothing while the ''Hustlers
took the field with IL runs to their credit
The game from that time on was
source of terror to the umpire and fren-
zied excitement to the "Rustlers" ant
"Hustlers. We would decide ''Safel
for the ''Rustlers" and the "Hustlers
would growl: ''Oh, see here Mister; that
wrong, that is; you're agin u.s. and thel
| we would make decision in favor of th,
"Hustlers" and the "Rustlers" woult
crowd around and expostulate, "Oh, com,
now, give us half show; you've beel
siding in with them fellows right along
tain't right to give them the earth
When nine innings had been PLAYED
the score stood 10 to 19, and 10 the in
ming to decide the superiority of the con
tending lines never shall forget.
*'How's that for balkF' 'Oh, my eye
What decisionp "Giye us a half
show Mister Umpirer THAT amt foulF
"How's that?" Judgement" etc. etc.
filled the air, and when the game wa
finally settled. Hustlers 80, Rustlers 81
| retired to a shaddy nook and vowet
never to umpire a game of base bal
again. The following night my dream
were broken with shouts of Foul
That's clear balkp' ''Oh, what
decision!" Judgment" etc.