Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-02-22
THE BOTTLE IMP.
A Voice Speaks from Within a
Mammoth Champagne Bottle,
And Gives Points on the ms and Out
of the PerambulatiA& Adver-
tising Business.
NnW N0rE Sun

New York Sun
The gilded neck of oontriyance fashioned
in the simiituae of champagne bottle tow
cred above the heads Of the throng i'll Sixth
avenue. A pair Of legs protruded from the
bottom Half way up on the side which
faced i'll the direction of its progress, was
small opening, with a grating across it.
Stepping alongside. the reporter raped near
the grating
who's therer' canc challenge in hollow
tones from within.
The response, "A FRIEND" suggested itself,
and was spoken.
What do You wantf' said the voice.
Nv ant to ask how you like this thing"
The bottle became communicative, and rs
it toddled along up the avenue the voice
saki: 1T all depends on the weather. A man
as understands the business will accommodate
himself to the seasons. He will tote ban
ner, or, may be- carry le;tered umbrella or
wear painted liner buster during the
heated term, take to boards when the
season Of raw northeast winds comes
on, and go into a bottle for the
winter. Boards is better than banners in
cold weather The wind always blows I'D or
down the street, SO a TELLER is pretty well
protected most Of the time When he comes
to crossing if he finds the wind whiStling
across pretty sharp, he can walk eigeways
and protect himself But in right down cold
weather bottle is as much better than
boards as double breasted beaver overcast
is better than a liver pad
"Ihen, again, i'll hot weather, no man as
knows himself will go intoa bottle, unless he
happens to be a chap as has seen good deal
better days, and don't want to be recognized
by his friends. Take ward politician in re-
duced circumstances, f'rinstance-he don't
want to he seen carrying banner or hetwecn
boards; SO he glad enough to go into hottie
for the heated term Then there is once
IN a while chap as has reasons for sort o
keeping ut Of view, you know, and he is
ready for bottle any time in the year
am telling no names, but knew party
what kept away from the police for month
or more, till they got Off his track, by doing
the bottle act. He used to toddle along
the avenue, right by the side of the detec-
tives who was looking for him. He wasn't
any OF your poverty stricken sort, but lived
like fighting cock-carried bottle of the
best old stuff in his coat pocket, lunched on
boned sardines when he was loafing along,
and smoked real Havanas The smokes Oh
that was all right He blew it out of the
lookout, and, il anybody saw it, they thought
it just curled up from the cigar Of somebody
else who was passing
1--WE amt all SO toney as this chap was,
the voice went on" but we manage to have
good many comforts My cupboard amt
very replete with luxuries, but can offer
you hunk of gingerbread, half sandwich
and o clay pipe Of tobacco. Generally
speaking, it amt safe to light pipe TIL dusk
and then you have to be careful when you
light up, and to hold your hand over the
bowl when you smoke But the neck Of thu
bottle holds the smoke in, and you can snuff
1t up half dozen times before it gets out
"Heavy" the voice said, in response to al
inquiry. mot very. You see this thing i.
made OF sort Of oil-cloth over a skeleton
like hoop skirt. The whole business don,
weigh much more than an ulster. For q
rainy day there amt nothing like it. n,
matter how hard it pours you're dry as 4
irisk. Another advantage of being in ,
bottle when the weather is suitable is tina
you c,n go against Ele wind about as goo,
as with it-presents a smooth and roun lins
surface, and you don't get blown all over tn,
sidewalk as you do with big fiat boards
"Oh little is COOL enough for me tall mex
May" said t e voice at parting. Conn
around and call again during the winter u
l don't recognize your knock, just sin, out
ana Shaa know your voice"