Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-04-09
To Lynch or Not TO Lynch.

just now to be all the rage. The church
festival, the sacred concert, the soiree
musicale, the grave donation and tho
hilarious yarn social seem to be suffer
ing an eclipse.
Lynching bees are out prospecting
for victims in almost every State in tho
Union and on every day in the week.
This, of course, is but one of those
popular crazes which sweep annually,
like tidal wave, over the Nation. It
may die out as suddenly as the fifteen
puzzle. If the wrong man is unavoid-
ably lynched at one of these playful
necktie socials, it is seldom discovered,
At least not in time'to do the man any
good. The principal in the affair gem
orally keeps still about it, and the others
are unanimously reticent about the
matter. Hanging by law is fast be-
coming the exception. The rule is to
lynch.
With the large floating class of muir
derers, horse thieves, etc., the various
vigilance committees are kept unusually
busy at this seasan of the year The
crop is of that peculiarly votary char
acter which is continually ripening for
the harvest. The dead and sapless
telegraph pole of the far West bears
strange fruit Mt times, while the UNI
brageous shade of the gnarled and
crooked live oak oft shelters the pulse
less clay which, after life's fitful fever.
stretches well.
The latest lynching episode which has
come to our ear or ears, occurred re-
Gently on the scientific frontier of Texas.
Kosciusko Dalrymple was hard char
acter, with n reputation as big as a
court house, but not so symmetrical,
perhaps, and at times he was looked
upon with longing, avaricious eyes by
the vigilantes. One day they nabbed
him under suspicious circumstances,
and uttcring with one voice: "Now is
the accepted time" hurried him out of
town to neigboring grove for the pur-
pose of helping him over the gravelly
bed of the shining river of light. On
this involuntary trip toward eternity,
Kosky earnestly and eagerly protested
his innocence of the express crime
charged in tho rude indictment, and
when the party arrived ut the grove
and took n breathing spell, Kosky got
his second wind and commenced 10
harangue the multitude with all the vc-
hcmcnce of Mark Anthony over the
corpse of Caesar, if not with that dis
tnguishcd Romans eloquence and adj
dress:
"Gcntlemcn," he said, I'm Il hard
citizen"
"The point is well taken," said the
chairman of the committee, "but tell
us something new."
Eyes, I'm tough. You know all
about me, suppose; know my record
and have got me down pretty middlin'
iincP'
1--WE are on to you, Kosky, this time
for fact"
"Yes, gentlemen, you've got me at n
disadvantage. I'm bad man from
away back, but / just want to remove
one stain from my reputation. / want
to say just one word before I'm swung
up, and it isn't that I'm goin' to glory
and to play on an organette. Ii isn't
one last word to my poor old mother,
for she has been dead these twenty
years; God bless her. 1t isn't to con-
fcss and tell the young men to let
ference between the nine spot and the
lady card No, gentlemen, none OF
these things agitate me now at this
supreme moment of my life. But what
want to know gentlemen. is this
They say | stole Gabe Runners horse.
That's the charge, Kosky," said the
chairman.
That's why you are going to do for
me now, l SUPPOSED"
That's about hit"
'All right, gentlemen. Do any OF
ywho have known me off and on for
four or five years believe | don't know
n good horse from n mustang, from n
broncho, from scrub colt with the
CHAMBERS, an onery, watch-eyed,
sweenied poll-evil animilc with his
shoulder knocked down and thrushes
in all four feet, name reached with a
jack knife and saddle gals as big as a
platterp"
you always was a good judge of a
horse, Kosky."
II WASP"
ayes, I'll say that much for YOU"
"Well, that's all got to say, gentle
men. Now, if / look like man who
would steal any of Gabe Runncl's stock
when there was plenty of good horses
otforty rods away; if look that mean
an oncry, and low down, and insignif-
cant, woppler jawed and freckled, why,
gentlemen, it was high time was hung
high. Go on with the matinee; I've had
my say. If I'm that low down in the
scale of humanity, why pull me up &c
glory and let me die like chicken
thief"
The committee looked at each Other
and considered. The proof against
Kosky was by no means complete, but
enough to hang him on general princi.
pies. But his rude logic had somewhat
shaken their determination At last
the chairman said:
"Kosky, I've got some mighty fine
blooded horses on my ranch.
'You have that" replied Kosky.
"And |, too," chimed in another.
Correct, you are" said Kosky."
"Kosky, we are afraid of YOU" said
the chairman.
II know it," said Kosky, "but II
you'll let up on me I'll put nine States
between me an your horses in less u
forty-eight hours. Fact, gentlemen.
your horses are a temptation, but il you
say the word I'm Off an you can go right
on improving your stock"
The chairman ordered the rope
thrown off Kosky's neck, and covering
him with his Winchester rifle, said, la
lonically:
"Skip."
And Kosky was off like the wind
Tcras Sytings.