Smyrna times., 1884-01-30
WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON. JANUARY 30 1891
Taking a Pill.

AHeIe are men born, no dOubt I,
swallow pills with grace and dionit,
ana perfect composure, lust as tbor,
are men born to lead armies successful
~ and others to arouse a nation bv
single burning sentence, and still other,
10 carve tough hen without COVERING
the congregation with woe and gravy
ouC they are not born very frequently
&c most OF us the swallowing of a nil
OF average size is an event in .our l;ves
'naC We do not soon forget. The
memory comes back to us DER and o,er
anu there are some of us mavbe who
can still taste the quiniae pill We took
IN the fall of 1874. That is, if we
haven't taken some of the same sort
since to give us a fresher memory
lhere is an individuality about the
q"ihihe plll-one of those big, smooth
glossy quinine pills, that you will never
forget II you have any business rela-
'ions with it-there is an individuality
about this pill, we say, that cannot be
disguised. "
When pill comes within the charm
eu circle of a persons teeth the throat
KICKS. 1t puts up the shutters and
closes the door. 1t apparently desires
TO go out of business. This same
throat may take in chunks of unchew-
aole heefsteak as big as hickory nuts
ana other stores for the interior depart
manu- by the side of which pill of the
largest growth would seem an insio-
hihcant affair, but it draws the line At
pills. 1t shuts up shop and saws 70
you just as plainly as can be, "vou
uont send any pills past me if I know
IT, This action of the humo, tbroo.
IN the matter of pills is very curious
ana mystifying to the ordinary mind
and we wonder that Matthew ArnoId
ana other great thinkers have NOT
gwen 1t more attention and sought 70
make clearer for the rest of ms tba !
reason why the human throat is time /
NlP''AN Nhtlg 50 unreasonable.
Some day when you are not exDect- .
ing any thing to happen outside of the
ordinary run of human events, YOU
leel little cold streak of intangible
ness, as Herbert Spencer would saw
STRIKE you in the back of the neck. run
down to your feet and up again on the
- L.. =
otner side, and then begin to rake up
olu personalities all through your svs-
tenn. You know then right away with
out looking in an encyclopedia that
you have chill, and you go off to n
doctor and ask him to prescribe for
you The doctor looks at your tongue
leelS your pulse, writes you a prescrin-
llon and sends you to druggist. The
druggists reads the heroglypbics on
lhe prescription and gives you box of
pills with directions for taking. There
S about eleven or thirteen of these
pills. big smooth fellows rolling about
n some sort of yellow powder, and Won ,
20 nome to take one of them accord
ng to the rules and regulations on tho
'ox' The whole family come into the
Dom TO see the performance. of course !,
Ihey have taken pills in their time :
nd they know there is fun in n Mill
when they are spectators :,
MY You probably say you are not E
'olng to have any foolishness with that !.
MI ; you are just going to swallow it =
lght down and be done with it. Then !
gu take pill out of the box, open :,
our mouth, hold your head back "
rop In the pill and make seven or ',
lsht desperate swallows. The dill =,
omes up smiling with its yellow over l.
oat and a good deal of its high flavor ~
'orn off on your tongue, and YOU look .,
lttie disappointed. Some one who 4.
as mad wider experience than the
hers with pills tells you to try 4 .,
Vallow of water with it. All right 4.
oure willing to take advice in this he
our hour of need. You drop the pill N
TO your mouth again and hastily =,
INK half glass of water. Where ia
e pull now? Oh, it is snug enough
'wn by the side of your tongue. II
dnt go down with the freshet. It is -
u travelling by water this season -. :
Try some grated APPLE" suggests the
rson with the advice on tap. You ~ ~
e willing by this time to try anything g., g.
at promises to deceive your throat to ~
ting that pill through. 1t is cover W
nicely in the very centre of a spoon 9"
OF grated apple, and with a weak -
Ft OF smile you throw your head ~
OK, put the contents of the spoon on Ret Re(
ur tongue, and swallow-.all the 10
pie. The pill fingers for an instant wO
out the palate. as if it had forgotten
pass word, and then comes SLOWLY FRO
to the teeth, leaving a great deal of
individuality all along its track. I
w bread is suggested for disguise yea
the pill. That is a good idea pre-
ny didn't some one think of that tiOl
ore. You chew up whole mouth vid
OF bread, put the pill in the middle cat
1t and make the greatest effort of the
II life in the way of single swal- mo-
:. But the result is not satisfactory
bread goes right along according c
regular schedule, but the pill is side. Civ
cked and held for further orders doc
this time a good part, or, to your II
.e, a bad part of the pill is worn out
ay' and you feel that you would Sin.
wv the rest of it by taste at anv W
Ire time in your life. Further he ,
re is the marks of bitterness and "
and hatred of the inventor of the is B
stamped plainly upon your coun- W
ance, and mayhap your feelings are tabl
that you canHot with seemliness A lie
ress them in the bosom of vour W
family. At last, lust as Bee,
are about to give up in despair scat
9 one suggests that the pill be NAL,
he'd up and clothed in jelly. That W
ne best idea yet. Why wasn't it max
lght of soonerP The pill is mashed w
clothed in Jelly and in n moman+ :. Is m