Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-10-24
BRIGHT BITS.


THE Vassar girls do not swear. They only
say buy gun" -AiHnss0tG Bds00.
"wHAT do you think Of Fielding?" asked a
Boston girl Of a Harvard graduate. sob. it s
important, of course, but it don't amount 10
anything without good batting.-Ihe Cole
gidR.
4 CLERGYMAN at Mount Desert is said TO
nave recently closed his prayer by saying,
'Oh Lord, now that our summer visitors have
departed. wilt thou take their place in our
Naturalization Globe.
WHAT are the natural products Of Ken
tuekyE" asked the teacher. I4haek er :.
YELLED little Sammy. "W hat elseS' w Risky y
yelled Tommy. "What elsegn "Kurnels. y
yelled Johnnie.-KeHtUcky State Journal
.HAvE you seen Bumm lately." "Yes,
saw him only few minutes ago" "Ah! at
some political meeting. probably, drinking IN
campaign elOquence." Not exactly ne was
drinking in the corner saloon. "-BostoH Trans
eript.
DICK-aHow old are youg" Joe-"rm goin'
on three" Dick-"Oh, that amt much; Pm
eight JOe-sWeil. you needn't be so stuck
up about 1t. My ma says can be eight, too,
after she gets married again. '-PhftddeLphid
can.
JANIToR Ito his wife who has hung the water
pail on the sas jet}-''Bridget, me darlin', did
Mr. Leyystraus tell you to put this pail on the
gass' Bird get-''No Pat; but he was after
sayiH' that the gas was lakIngl shure."-
WHY he Perspired: Doctor-"Tell me exact.
Is what your condition is. Do you have night
sweats2'' Patient-''Yes;a almost every nj ght.'
DoctOr-"My dear sir, this begins TO look seri-
Gus. About how long do they last. Patlent-
About as long as l have to tote the baby up
and down.
Boston school class in history: Teacher
johnnie, what was the most notable ship
that ever landed on the New England coastt'
The aaylower, cir. hight my bright Ut
tie man. Now. Willie, what noble idea was
brought over in the AayfOwer!' Pork and
beans, ir.r-BOst0n Times.
SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER-'.When George
Washington was little boy what was 1t be
said he could not dof' small Scho ar-"he
couldn't tell a lie" Sunday School Teacher
"And why could he not iell a le?" Small
Scholar-"Because he knOwed he'd get licked
for it.'-Pitts6urg ChroHfcle-7etegrdph.
NOTES from the diary Of Nile. Irmo Won
Breserlo: First dayton the high seas; stormy
weather; disagreeable company. Second day
Captain very amiable; made declaration
Of love and offered me his heart aud hand; re-
iected THIRD day-Captain returnE to the
charge, threatens to kill me, commit suicide
and blow up the whole vessel With 300 persons;
rejected. Fourth day-Saved the lives Of 3C0
persOns.-Fliege1lde Batter.
TRAGIC POEM Young Peterby is a poet
a tragic poet, one OF the best in Austin. ANA
several OF his poems haye been published He
met Gus De Smith the other day. Gus was
looking very blue. Have you read my last
tragic pOem:" asked Peterby. Nav. I'm not
looking blue about that. I've got $50 bet on
Blaine. and when see those new Mulligan
letters in print I've got all the tragic poetry
need for the next ten thousand years"
Teens SiftiHGs.
MOSQUITO MELODY
Tn mosquitoes buzz and bite
Oft in the chilly night.
BuZ -Z-z-Z-Z-Z!
Hum-m n m m!
SE1Di SLAP! SLAP!
Naughty chap.
That mosquito
Will cause me to
SfcedTf
THERE! -CAicago Sun,