Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-07-10
A Penetrating Study Of French.
IDrake,s Trayellers' Magszine.I

tDnakes Travellers Magsztne.1 /
"My DEAR" said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, looking earnestly at her hus-
band and biting the side of her fore
finger, "My dear, do you know we
ought 10 study French 3 |
"What for ?'' asked Mr.. Spoop-
endyke. laying down his paper and
leaning back with an air of patience
so obviously artificial that it looked
like print. "Found the English |
too short for your pro-
fundity of ideas Got an idea that
you would appear better in low
necked and short-sleeved French than
you do in your native yard and a
half of tongue?"
''It wasn't that" replied Mrs.
Spcopendyke, examining her finger.
ST thought, perhaps we might go to !
Europe somes time, and then we
could enjoy it better if we could
talk like the rest
81 don't know" said Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, severely. at strikes me that
when I get where you and the rest
talk alike shan't have much Of a
time. How're you going to fix it?"
81 was thinking we might get one
of the French systems and study
it nights" explained Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke. SIN fact" she continued hys-
terically, GIVE bought it already,
and 1 can talk little now"
'Let's hear" grunted Mr.. Spoop-
endyke, startled by the fact that his
wife had run little ahead of him.
"All right" giggled Mrs. Spoop-
endyke. ':Now, you listen. Carson,
donny moy lee-lee-Oh, yes!-lee
lee dejunner a la forshet! I'll bet
a cooky you can't. guess what that
means?"
"Haye you vivisected any genuine
Frenchman with the particular effort
YETI" demanded Mr.. Spoopendyke.
''cornered tramp and tried it on
him to see how it works?"
81 knew you wouldn't guess it,"
crowed Mrs. Spoopenkyke, clapping
her hands. "And that is an easy
one, too. What do you do first
thing, in the morning?"
81 generally watch female luna
tic taking the hardware out of her
crimps," suggested Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, solemnly. "Is that the French
for knock-kneed hair-pins, with the
knickerbockers on 'em?"
NO. replied Mrs. Spoopendyke,
shaking her head emphatically.
s'That isn't it. The first thing you
say in France is, Carson, porter moy
mon cafe au lay, and he brings it
"He must be loaded in both bar
rels with an accommodating spirit. u
|growled Mr.. spoopendyke, "if he
brings anything on that stutter.
What does he do with the other
thing you called for !? Leaves it
tied up in the yard, maybe. Or
perhaps he discovers that the de-
junner has gone out with the key to
the forshet and won't be back till
dark. Who's 'he,' anyhow ?"
"'He' is the carson" expounded
Mrs. Spoopendyke. Gle"
II didn't know but what it was
old man Gar himself, by the way
you ordered him around" snorted
Mr.. Spoopendyke. HAS 'he' got a
sister to take my orders p
"Garson, means waiter, dear, u
continued Mrs. -Spoopendyke pla'
cidly. Snow, you know what cafe
is, don't you What do you gener-
ally drink at breakfast ?"
81 generally drink in heap Of
dodgasted nonsense proclaimed
Mr.. Spoopendyke. ''When the
family is in good working order and
the gearing well oiled 1 contrive te
|
slake my thirst ON liquid idioey."
"That's wrong" smiled Mrs
Spoopendyke.
81 know it is," retorted Mr.
Spoopendyke, grimly, "but it is thu
best 1 can get, and can't help it. Ct
. ahead with your drum corps, now
: When he brings up the distemperee
. mind, what do you say then ?"
, "Cafe is ccffee," said Mrs
Spoopendyke, with a toss of he1
: head. "And when I say porter mo.
o lie cafe, I mean"
"That's queer mixture" muse'
q MIR. Spoopendyke. You can nav
yours that way, if you prefer it, bu
, I'll paralyze him with porter garso
me lie cafe. 1 think I'd rather hav
the porter mix the water in mine
than take it the other way"
~ don't know" murmured Mrs
Spoopendyke. II don't think til
system says anything about that.
only speaks Of the carson porterln
the coffee, and I'm not sure that To
porter would come up at all. Nov
dear, do you know what the first es
a preston used means p
"Do you mean that knockout be
tween the dejunner and the forshet
L suppose it has something to d
with the police hasn't it +? Whe
the porter and the carson begin