Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1884-11-27
MY RED PANTS.

VI lGED PANISs
The smokers for so we called all
civilians at the military college of st.
| Cyr, might well have asked each other
the reason why, on certain day in a
certain year. each of the St. Cyrians
carried bundle under his arm on leav-
| ing the train.
| 1t was just this-a pair of breeches.
Goodness gracious!-and what for?
! Well, then, listen! The day previous
an order had been issued as follows:
| Since a great number of the pupils, not to
| say all the pupils, have been seen wearing
| on exact days trousers which are not regula-
| ton style, such INSTRUMENTATION can no
longer be, and the general in command of
the college hereby says that he will not toll
crate such an objectionable otfense in
school whose pupils have the honor of be-
Ing allowed to wear epau' cites.
In consequence period OF forty-eight
hours IS given, at the expiration of which
time all traces of any non-regulaton effects
period found guilty of such possessions will
be punished to the extent of fifteen days III
the police cells, eight of which shall be TAX
en- out OF the annual holiday period.
(Signed) By The GENERAL.
That is why every one was hurrying
off with the compromising vestments
and were arriving in Paris each with q
bundle under his arm.
/ myself was unfortunately not of
that party. had been detained till the
last moment by veXatious red-tape-
ism for one of my brass buttons being
unpublished.
was in the court at the inspection
which precedes the opening of the
large gates. | was annoyed at my
misfortune, and SO enraged with this
unluckv button which refused to polish,
that | remained there quite down-cast,
looking after my retreating comrades.
| was forgetting, however, the rigid
order about the neither garments.
held it there while brooded over my
ill-lucG, when suddenly the idea struck
me of allowing one of my friends to
get rid of it. Alas! but too late. The
door was fast closed.
turned round in anger to find N.Y.
self face to face with the general.
He had been fellow-oflicer of my
fathers.
well" said he, James, are you 60
ing in already?"
THAT is, general, | said confused
ly. that am not going out"
THAT is not on account of your
work? | am sure that is quite good
enough"
No, general, l have been shut in
this very moment"
You stupid fcllow!n
Yes, general.
was moving away, when he touched
me on the shoulder
"Cuccr upl Never mind! Come and
dine with me; the time will pass quick
er that way, won't itP / will tell the
sentry to allow you to pass into my
quarters"
You are too good. general. Thank
you"
well. this evening. then"
Here was just what wished. Ex-
ccpt-my garment! What luck! l
would surely find some opportunity to
give it to Ben, 1.-THE orderly" who
would hide it for me till better times
You see, | would have thrown it
away, no matter where, although it
would have grieved me to do so. They
were my first pair of red combinations.
No matter. Anything would have
been better than twelve days coniino-
ment.
So at o'clock l rang at the generals
headquarters, hiding my packet under
my arm. hoping to give it shortly to
faithful Ben.
The door was opened. Halo!
it was not Ben; it was little brunette,
of engaging appearance Anyhow, |
was going TO give her the package in
confidence. when there, at the end of
the hall, as If Intentionally, the gener-
al appeared with several people, whom
he was leading to the door. | slipped
in hastily. and, almost in spite of N.Y.
self, the maid pushed me toward the
drawing-room, where, with my cap in
one hand and my garment in the other,
remained. Happily no one was there!
but plan had to be thought of for con-
cealment, and that quickly.
CHANGING around, / sought some
place of safety, but nothing met me,
and heard some one coming.
was near the piano; it lay open; the
steps were quite near. So much the
worse. Here goes! And my nethers
disappeared inside it.
just in time. A moment later and
the general arrived, followed by his
daughter.
After dinner some few friends drop
ped in and the general took the men off
to the smoking-room to have what he
called the regulation fumigation."
Imagine my horror when, on return
ing to the drawing-room, l saw the
candles lighted on the piano.
Were they, then, going to play?
Yes, they were. thought That was
quite evident. The ladies were talking
of sonatas and concertos. What a
fatality this wretched musici 1t near
ly drove me mad, detested il so that
evening.
Miss N raised her hands grace
fully and opened the FRAY. At the
same time | closed my eyes and heard
a noise like the distant bowling of a
strangling cat. Then again silence!
With frightened look gazed at
Miss N, who, in her turn, looked
at me in perpleXed manner.
There must be something in the
piano. surely!" she exclaimed.
There just is" said l to myself.
They looked in. Halo, why, here's
large packager' am done for.
Aud rapidly Miss N took the
tongs, and, after number of prods,
fished up piece of red cloth, which,
in unrolling, gradually assumed the APP
pearance of pair of examinations. l
was on thorns.
My new breeches!" suddenly ex
claimed the general. purple with rage.
That COMPOUNDED Benz that three
quarters formed animall He does
nothing but make mistakesi The idea
of taking piano for chest of draw
ersim
And in great confusion he seized the
unlucky pants. folded them up nervous
ly, and disappeared, inveighing against
the idiocy of regulations in general,
and his own in particular.
True, have lost my pants forever,
bur. thanks to the general, have not
visited the police cells.
A meeting of salt manufacturers at
Bay City. Mich, to consider move
ment to sink test salt well below the
present strata. in order to discover
whether the same strata as exists at
Marine City and Manistee can be
found, decided 10 raise $25, 600, and
one well owner contracted to sink his