Martinsburg independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1875-1900, 1884-08-02
BUNKER HILL LETTER.
Special Correspondence.

feeble effort Of last week really
requires an apology not only to
yourselves for occupying space,
but to the poor disappointed read
er who / know was more fooled
than if he had read a glowing adj
vertisement of some patent med
icine. Well, l do apologize, but
my excuse must be based upon
the following grounds. | was
sick, and consequently very much
demoralized. May be you don't
know what it is to be sick. Well,
I do, and while it is yet fresh in
memory I might as we'll relate in
brief my painful experience, as I
suppose you like every body else,
like to listen to the revelations of
suffering humanity. On last Mon
day, very imprudently went in
to the field to make some hay. I
knew my system was little out
of order, because I noticed that
my stomach almost rebelled against
my usual morning beverage Ia
glass of cold water), yet duty call
ed and I had but to obey. The
consequences were, I came home
in the evening weak, weary and
forlorn. I retired early, and told
my wife that / thought l was go
ing to be sick that night She
not only looked amazed but lit
tie scared. She did not know
what was going to happen. I
however went to bed assuming as
much indifference as the nature of
the case would allow, leaving in
structions for her to make all the
necessary preparations for the
seige, such as providing water,
soothing syrups,mustard plasters,
stomach premps, scrub brooms
and other sick room furniture;
feeling satisfied that such things
would be needed. / patiently
awaited the attack which was not
long in coming I commenced at
both ends of me, first in my head
and then in my heels. Pains-yes
I reckon that is what I will call
them, but it seems to be very
tame name for thing that re-
quires so much room, - started sim
ultaneously from the two extreme
points of my organization, and 1
was not long in discovering that
they were antagonistic to each
other and were striving for some
centre. While the conflict was
going on I was wincing, and cork
screwing around, imagining to
myself the result when it got to
its worst They finally met right
in the middle of me, there formed
a combination and done it's work
as one rearing, ranting, roaring
ain. Doct. Morrison was away
and there was no physician here.
Happy thought! DR.. Gums
book lies upon the shelf-Wife
gets it down, and asks what form
of disease she must look for, be-
ing in great agony and her tenn
per naturally a little rufiied. I
told her if / had to make my own
diagnosis / could be my own doc
tor. Look for something-look
for epilepsy, apoplexy, paralysis,
Small Pox, Asiatic cholera, tetanus
toothach, or any thing-just SO it
would correspond with my symp-
tons. This all took time and
things began to look desperate,
got up and walked the room, laid
down and rolled over the floor,
get upon my knees and elbows
and tried to bore my head
through the pillow, groaned and
grunted, sniffled and snorted, but
no relief came. Finally, some
thing was found which we thought
was bearing on my case. It was
now midnight. The rest of the
inmates were aroused, one of them
was blindfolded, turned into the
garden to grab for herbs, others
preparing and applying mustard
plasters, clystery, some making
teas, whilst the rest were prepar-
ing vapor baths, &c. They final
ly commenced dosing me. It was
like adding fuel to fire. 1t only
made that pain mad, its proper
tons larger, it's circuit wider, its
velocity greater. It traversed the