Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1884-01-17
How He Won the Sauatter.


comes along here?" asked a travel
stained man of an old fellow who sat on,
a pile of cross ties near an Arkansas
railroad.
eyes, 1 reckin kim
'.Rut will youp" asked the traveller,
after moments silence.
Eyes, reckin will"
''Well, what time?'
''What time what, mister
''What time does the train come along
here?''
81 Dunno
you said you did"
Didn't"
81 say you did"
''Say didn't
''What did you say?"
''Said I tell you when it'comes along,
an eff both O. us are here when she
comes I will, but I reckin yer ken see
her as well as KEN
''You think you are very smart, don't
you?'' sa1
''Not now. was right peart till the,
rheumatic sot in
''Vhere do you ive?"
'I'm livin' here, now"
sis this your homeP''
''Noah' - ls
''Then you don't live here?'
"Wall, I don't die here, do L? Longs
I'm here I'm Iivin' here.''
'When the train comes do you sup
pose l can get On?''
''Yas, if it stops"
''But that's what I want to know.
VIII it stop"
Il KANT tell yer right now, although
I'm alters pleased to give to stranger
any information in my power.
''When can you tell me?'' asked the
stranger, evidently thinking that the
old fellow was going in search of infor
nation.
.'When she gifts here.'
''Now, say, old man, don't like to be
made game of in this way You may
have nothing to do but sit around and
spend your life in joking, but am
thoroughly in earnest. l have come
long distance to reach this road, and I
want to leave this wretched country.
You would confer great favor on me
by answering my questions in q straight
forward manner. If the train is not
likely to stop at this woodward, why
then I must walk until I come to sta
ton. Now give me your honest opinion.
Do you think that the next train will stop
here?"
"Now, stranger, . replied the old fell
low,. leaning over and tying his shoe,
eyer ken talk mighty pitiful, must al
low, an eff yer was a preacher it would
take all the plank at the saw mill to
make a mourners' bench big enough fur
yer church. I'd be a mighty man ter
hold back any news I've got about this
matter, an bein' as I like yer looks I'll
tell yer all know about these trains. -
81 thank you most heartily, sir. -
81 expect l know rs much about these
trains as any man what lives in this here
community"
81 have no doubt of it.
''An' all that know about 'em stop
ping here I'll tell YER" s-
''Weu?"
''W'y, sometimes they stop an some
times they don't. That's all know
81 am half inclined to jump on you
and maui you" .s
Better walk ter the station, stranger,
than ter try that. The last man what
tried it amt been able to tend the
United States Cou't sence." .......f.
''Well, how far is it to the next sta
tionP''
(Which way? Thiser way or thater
way?" pointing.
EITHER way"
''Well, they'se bout the same dis
tance'
''How far?" Is
Blame fl know
'pu be confounded if I stand this.
Come over here and III lick you.'' 9.
''Well, eff yer wanter whup me wus'n
wanter be whipped, yer'd better come
over here. - 81
81 can do it, and don't you forgit it. y
''Well, eff yer do, 1 amt apt ter .forgit
it,
''TIl try it anyway and taking off
his coat a bottle fell out a -..s1..
tHole on. What yer got in that bot
tleP''
"Whisky."
'"Then thar's no use in tighten and
throwing out a quid of tobacco, he
limped across the track, took drink
and said: 2s1~,a
''Train amt likely to stop here"
Took another drink. .-...-,
CLOSEST stations down this way
| Another drink.
''Three miles. - '-.-At
| Another. .r...,.a -t. ...1
MAKE it better. Two amer half.''
| Still another.
go down thar an them niggers will
takeyer'On ham car. Good day, Cap'n.
Wush yer WE'LL Eff yer'd 'nounced yer
principles in the fust place thar wquldn't
ter been all this argyin', '-ArbanSaaO
! TrGUeler. '-~ '-'-
I.ar., .-.4r3 q
The Female Managing Editor.
When very mad man rushes into the
st. Louis Chronicle Office with club, and
expresses in emotional tones an ambition
to annihilate somebody, he is politely
ofnr-rod 70 AIiSs LNnrr,rr IL. -