The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1884-10-16

find themselves in college studying
Latin and Greek But the grad
yates OF the Stable usually chew
tobacco; they smoke also and gen
orally swear, and contracting the
habit Of kicking the horses, are
very apt in moments OF excitement
to try the experimen on their
wives, and right here is the point
that materially effects the romantic
boarding school Miss. Love in a vine
clad cottage with John and bread
and cheese and kisses. is Parable,
or at least as near as one can reas-
Onabiy hope to get to it Il this sub
lunary sphere. but when JOHN comes
ONE drunk smelling Of whiskey
and onions and Maria Jane re-
monstrating with him gives her
black eve. Paradise yanishCS. Yet
this IS what John viii Go every
time; hence | say for an educated
young lady. whose life surround
ings have bcer gentle and polite.
John is a tad investment. Some
where II the vicinity Of the kitchen
John viii! find his affinity. Susan
has hc.n in the habit OF ruling the
house with q rod OF iron. which was
fortunate enough 10 secure her ser
vice, she will stani no nonsense
from any one; if John comes home
drunk to her during tic honeymoon
or at r. he wakes ny next morn
ing with 4 pair O! black eyes; his
his head is all Gov red with plaster;
he feels as if he had been run over
by t. ain Of cars and then d avn
through q knot hole afterwards;
he wonders what has happened,
but Susan walks about the house
singing, Il wan: to be an angel
just as clipper as il every day was
the Fourth OF July or Thankssiv
in@. Now that's just the kind OF
angel that John appreciates. and in
fact Just the kind ofange! he needs;
the chances are with such an angel
as that 10 go through his pockets
whenever she has a chance, and
WHO puts the result Of her discovery
in the Savings Bank, john will one
day have Il stable Of lis own The
highest ambition If Coachman,
lust as the highest ambition Of a
prize-fghter, is to retire from the
ring and keep gin mill.
The first mad illusion past. no
educated brainy woman ever loved
an ignorant saphcad since the word
began. After casting her lot with
him, she may, silently and without
a murmur, have walked to her grave
while the canker was eating Etr
heart-but it was the madness Of
despair. Pause, girl; pause-mar-
ry dwarf if you please, or take a
feller with q hump on lis back like
a Persian camel; take feller with
one leg, or chap with no legs at all;
but get a feller with head on him;
he may be ugly as kangaroo, but
beauty; is only skin deep at best,
but if he has brain and is decently
sober and industrious man, he IS
worth all the Johns that ever wore
a cockade, cracked whip, or shov-
eled ov' a stable In regard to Mr..
Morisinl have very little symrhl-
thy for him. For number Of years
he occupied the position of Bounccr
to Jay Gould. 1t is almost tn
years ago since New York was start
led with the news that man nam-d
Selover had thrown Jay Gould down
a cellar and killed him They had
been fast friend or at least, Sc o.
yer thought so, a2d on Jay Goulds
advice, Seloyer = ent into certain
fancy stock. and while he was worth
several thousands when The sun 70
that morning-wlen the sun welt
down he was cleaned out, just rs
clean as a shotgun. After the ad-
iournment of the board he met
Gould on Exchange Place, altf seiz-
ing him by the slack Of his breeches
he dropped him down an area; which
was not q very astonishing feat for
him. for Selov,r turned the scale at
265, and Gould who happened just
then to be in prime condition.
weighed SO. After that Mr. Gould
never went out alone; next day he
engaged Mr.. Morisini, who was un-
dcrstood to he fighter, who carried
Derringers in his pockets and Bow
ie.kniyes in his boots. He gener-
ally walked about ten feet behind
Mr.. Gould, and every feller knew
just as sure as preachin' that if lie
laid hand On the little Croesus
he friend Of Garibaldi would send
him into kingdom come before he
could say Jack, much less Robin
son. BY and bye, the Bouncer in
addition to his salary was allowed
10 take an occasional flyer at stocks,
and aided by NJ. Gould's advice,
you may be sure he did not lose.
From extreme poverty he mounted
to opulence, and while twenty
years ago he would have welcomed
a rich mans coachman into his
family, to-day it gives him fit of
the colo, from which he may not
recover. I pity the coachman for
he is bound to lose his wife, but he
will lick her first. pity the girl
when the scales drop from her eyes
as they are sure to do, and alter
John has found his way to the pen
itentiary and Susan is doing wash
ing in a cellar, for fifty cents doz
en-, she will realize the beauty Of