The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1884-03-28
SELECT STORY.
CONQUERING A HUSBAND.


Uncle Phil has been lecturing me
again !" exclaimed Mrs. Charles Dykes
as her husband came home to tea one
evening. 81 cannot, and will not
stand it any longer" and the young
wife dropped into chair as though
the last remaining portion of hei
strength had left her.
"What was the subject of the lee
ture, my dear?" inquired Mr.. Dykes
with cheerful smile, as though hi
did not regard the situation as at al
desperate.
"You know very well that Uncle
Phil has but one subject
"And that is extravaganza, or tn,
reverse, economy added Mr.. Dykes.
"Of course, that was the subject Of
the lecture and you always take his
side of the question. Uncle Phil ha
ten times as much influence with yol
as I have. Whatever he says is right
and whatever say is wrong retortet
Mrs. Dykes, rather warmly.
"If supper is ready, l think we haG
better attend to that next; and W,
shall have the whole evening to dis
cuss Uncle Phil's lecture. The sub
ject will keep for WHILE"
"But Uncle Phil will be here t.
take part in the discussion; and tina
is Just what / don't want. He over
shadows me entirely when he says any
thing, and might as we'll hold m.
tongue as speak," pouted the wife.
"Uncle will not be here, Marian
1t is half past six, and he has to go t.
a church meeting at seven."
Every well, but Pm going to hav
something done this time. / won
have Uncle Phil here any longer. I
he is to stay in this house / shall not.
Mrs Dykes was very young, an
her angry pout, as she sailed out Q
the room, made her look decided
pretty; at least so thought her hu'
band. But before she was fairly on
the door opened and Uncle Phil cam
in. The door was ajar and he mus
have been in the hall during some po
ton of the lady's severe remarks abou
him. But he looked as placid a
though earth had no sorrows for hin
He was man of fifty, though his ha
and beard were white enough for Sc,
enty.
He did not seem like man VIII
could be very disagreeable if he triet
He had deaconish look about h
face, that of serious though not austel
man. Certainly no one would hav
taken him for shipmaster, but he ha
spent most of his life at sea or in fo
eign ports. He used to read the Bib
to his crew every Sunday, and neve
allow any swearing or other bad lar
guage in his presence on board til
ship. Though he was ''psalm singing
no captain was ever more popular wit
his men than Captain Dykes.
| Uncle Phil had been married in ca
ly life, but his wife died while he WI
absent on long voyage. He had r
Gently given up the sea and returne
to his native town, now place of te
thousand inhabitants. He found hin
self a stranger there, but at his own +
quest his nephew had taken him as
boarder.
| The gossips were not little bottle
ed to determine whether the retire
shipmaster was rich or poor. He e
gagged in every Church and benev
lent enterprise, and contributed mo-
erately of his means.
Charles Dykes had opened store
Tripleton a year before, and ever
one thought he was doing well. MI
Dykes thought so, though Charl
himself insisted that he was not ma
ing money very rapidly; he could n
tell how much until he balanced h
books and took account of stock.
the main, he was prudent and car
full young man, or at least was suppc
ed to be so.
Uncle Phil made hasty supp,
and then went to his meeting. |
acted just little strangely for hi
though the smile had not deserted |
face. He said less than usual a.
seemed to be thinking very earnest
about something
"Do you suppose he heard what
said, Charles 2" asked Mrs. Dyk'
when Uncle Phil had gone,
81 think not; but you ought not
say anything behind his back that y
would not say before his face,'
piled the husband. "Uncle Phil is
. good man, one of the salt of
EARTH
Il "He is altogether too salt for me.
D l should put much salt in the doug
nuts, you would not like them. I'm
Phil is salter than Lots wife,
81 am sorry you don't like him M
ian."
81 can't like man who is cont
ally tripping me up, and lecturing
ON economy. You ought to know b
Id ter than he does what you can affor
IN 81 am sure that nothing but his
terest for us prompts him to say a
thing. If one means we'll almost a
thing can be excused
ca When l said that / wished
would keep horse so / could ride
every day or two, he read me lect
half an hour in length. Whether
heard me or not, said just VIII,