Grand Rapids morning telegram., 1884-11-25
UNIQUE NAMES.
Some Curious Cognomens Among the Ma
tion's Pensioners.
FWashfnOton Star1

Some Curious Cognomens Among the Ma
tion's Pensioners.
Washington start
Eyes, frequently meet queer people
with queer names," said a prominent
pension attorney In answer to the question
Of a Star reporter.
IL can recall number of names of ac-
tual living persons" he continued, (which
are as significant as any to be found in the
works of John Bunyan, Samuel Warren,
or Charles Dickens. Praise God Bare
bones is not circumstance with some
names have!"
"Ahy" interrupted his questioner, "do
you mean names suggestive Of character
or occupation"
YES" was the response. persons
whose names are associated with colors,
as Brown or White are often met with |;
50, also, the names of Long and Short,
and similar cognomens are so common as
not TO excite surprise, but there are
many instances where the appellation is
peculiarly pointed and even ludicrous in
its effect. For example,: Pilgrim Crazy
lous' Is school teacher in Pennsylvania
mining district, and his name reminds me
of the time when sat in an old district
school-house on hard wooden bench, just
behind short-haired urchin whose head
would have been benefited by the use of a
tne-tooth comb, and whose proximity
learned to dread after my mother had made
several searching Investigations of my
scalp"
II suppose Pilgrim boards round?v OBJ
served the reporter.
81 don't know" laughed the attorney.
"But here is man who ought to be one of
his scholars" and he handed the reporter a
letter signed by I'D. Slatecypher.n While
the Star man studied the signature the
lawyer pulled from pigeon-hole a bundle
of papers and suddenly resumed: t'Christ-
ly Crow is a colored preacher who was a
good soldier in the war and was badly
wounded. He is now fighting Satan in an
Illinois city which is big and bad, and 1
understand has had considerable success
as minister among his own race. don't
wish TO be irreverent," continued the
speaker, "but have met several 'Christs'
in the line of my business. "A Christ, ,
from Bethlehem, not Judea, but Pennsyl-
vania. applied through me for a pension,
while y. Christ" who was gallant soldier,
lighting through the entire rebellion, is
now, think, clothing dealer in st. Louis.
christian Bible is an Indiana German,
who ought to be a good man, but l have
forgotten what he follows for liveli-
hood"
Here the narrator paused for moment
to relight his cigar, which operation hav-
ing been accomplished, he took up paper
and said: There is a strange relation of
names and incidents set forth i'm this appli-
cation"
The reporter examined the document and
found that 81. S. Timberleg" was asking
Uncle Sam to pension him because he had
: been mangled by splinter during an en-
gagement before Charleston in 1864, on ac-
count of which injury amputation above
the knee was rendered necessary, so that
for the last twenty years his name has
been peculiarly applicable. A striking CO.
incidence in this case was that the Justice
of the Peace before whom the necessary af-
fidavits were signed bore the name of
Isaac Walkingstick.p
Here's another" sentitiously said the
lawyer, as he showed second application
toward his visitor, who found that "Tor-
ment Twist" was suffering the twisting
torments of rheumatism, contracted i'm the
winter campaign of General Thomas near
Nashville. The reporter regarded the pa
per with contemplative silence, which was
broken by the attorney excIaiming,
"'Dreams go by contraries,' AMI that is
true of names sometimes, for John Drink
lager never drank lager or any other intox-
icating liquor In his life. He went through
the war in the same company with me, and
was wounded in the Wilderness. | know
him well, and when he was here to see
about his pension he made rattling tenn
perance speech one evening before Good
Templars' Lodge in this city, which he
visited with me-" After two or three puffs
at his cigar, the speaker went on: area
son Twig' Is compound of schoolbov
slang, and Is an unusual name even for a
Vermont Yankee; but Il il no more peculiar
than Skye Leaf which Il Indian. Another
enlisted Indian scout is known as Ka Nj Ye
Ulster, who was disabled by frost bites out
in Montana, notwithstanding the protection
-sf his name" The speaker here arose
calmly and lighted the gas, saying as he
did so: 81 have q letter from a woman out
in Cincinnati. She Is a soldiers widow
and Is entitled 10 her pension. Her name Is
Nottingham which, think, Is just little
suggestive of 'Porkopolis,' don't youf''
The reporter sat helplessly dazed for a
moment, but recovered sufficiently to gasp:
81 guess I'D better be moving. !. and bidding
his companion "good night,s went down
the street wondering why people viii bear
such names when an application 20 Leg
lsiature would se<nre for then, such ap-
peiiations as we're de Vere'' or "Percy, -
or even plain "John Smith,
Clam chovtier IL getting IN high fashion in
London. Mr.. John Clayton of the Court