Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1884-03-24
EAs

One young man said to another: "It's a
long way from this world 70 the next .sOh,
never mind, my dear fellow" said the other;
.syouII have it all down hill,"-Free Press.
Little Dot had just passed the ordeal of
vaccination. Looking at her inhamed arm,
she anxiously querisd: Mamma. I won't
have to be baptized now, will I7"-The
Hoosier.
Professor. explaining point in physiology
Nov take my arm" CO ed. who has
been doing on the back seat rouses up and
murmurs: Thank you guess I will; it is
rather rsiippery."-College Exchange.
The Rev George H. Hepworth calculates
that he has made more enemies by telling the
truth at funerals than in any other way. It
ought TO draw crowds, though. Telling the
truth at funerals is great novelty.-Phila-
delphia Call.
.Jimmy, where we're you yesterday even.
ine?" ''Well, the first part of the evening
tied pack of firecrackers to our dogs tail
and he ran under the smoke house and set it
afire, and after that pa and me went off on
whaling expedition. The Judge.
Louisville grocers take right good care not
to lose cent in any of their bargains One
of these gentlemen charged lady two cents
extra for chicken, because it laid an egg
every afternoon, and she wasn't going to
kill it until the next day.-Peck's Sun.
They had the motto, ''Seek and Ye Shall
Find,'' hung on the wall over the grab-bag at
Q church fair. The appropriateness was
finally noticed and rectifed by a wag, who
submitted, "He Tempers the Wind to the
Shorn Lamb. Cincinnati Saturday Night.
A writer in scientific magazine attributes
sea sickness to aa ''irritation of the semi
circular canals of the ear, or the abdominal
viscera, or both, which become full of
blood" We didn't suppose canals had any
thing to do with Observation-Disclosures
Herald.
At the annual dinner of Sorosis in New
York on Monday Mrs. Croly, the president,
in Offering the toast 'tFhe Women Martyrs"
said that ''the martyrdom of woman was an
uuspoken agony" Anything ''unspeakabls'
must be great agony to woman, that's
fact--Norristown Herald.
ssCan you give me a little money on that
account of yours this morning?" ''No. 1
don't believe I can this morning" "Well,
will you appoint time when you can? You
have traded with me good deal and have
never paid me q cent 81 know it. l am
free-trader. .'-Exchange.
A little fellow with tall, stalwart wife was
asked by friend il the contrast between
them didn't often expose him to mortify ing
remarks. ''Oh, I don't mind that" he said
cheerfully, s'but since Sarahs grown near
siehted have to look sharp for fear she'll
step on me. Brooklyn Eagle.
8 "Yes," said Mrs. Smith, who had just
alighted from q horse car; ''yes, got myself
ali mud. and I guess I've wet my feet; but I
didn't get out at the crossing. These cor
porations can make rules, but I guess the
people have some rights yet, and though the
men may tamely submit the women wont. p
Boston Transcript.
'sAnanias lived long while ago, didn't
hs?'' questioned Sunday school lad as he
trotted along by the side of his teacher. "a
very long while ago." was the anpwer.
Then guess Chicago was an ancient city"
ssWhst makes you think so?" 81 heard father |
say that Ananias was a reporter for a Chi |
eago newspaper. ."-Brooklyn Eagle.