St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1884-03-23
TRIPLES.

A Louisville lady has sued for divorce, as
serting that her husband has not done any
work for fourteen years. There are some
women who want man to be on the keen
jump all the time.-Courier-JoaH
The "Sweet Singer of Michigan" has
made oscar Wilde'' rhyme with ''foster
child" This is a little more creditable than
her attempt to rhyme guinity'' with
claws a. massy," but not much-BiSDIaret
Tribune.
In Analysing the wells used for drinking
water in New Hampshire, it was found that
ninety-fve per cent. of them were polluted.
We didn't suppose that there were so many
desirable summer resorts in that state. Nor
ristolcn Herald
The vigilantes out in Arizona hanged a
man the other day because he was con-
firmed liar Good gracious. If it gets to be
the rule to hang liars, none of us-that is to
say, there are great many men who will be
in danger. Tsras SJtmgs.
An American poet has written some verses
entitled Gan Angel in the House, No
doubt he thinks so now, but let him wait
three or four years, and see if he doesn't
make mental revision of that poem. Bur-
| l1lgtol Free Press.
A Toronto blacksmith advertised for q
helper who ''must be as quick as lightning"
The first man who applied for the situation
carelessly picked up hot horseshoe aud the
blacksmith hired him at once. brakes TraV
eler'S Magazine.
''It is said that Ell Mahdi allows nobody to
approach him who does not come on all
fours." 1t may be inferred from this that
he would treat the American hog with little
more respect than is shown by Prince Bis
marck. Norristolcn Herald.
Mrs. O'Toole-Faith, it's wonderful what
since thin dumb bastes have It's Their
chaze it skips off with as big as loife Mkt
tonne I'll be afther putting the chaze inside
of ther trap, where he can't get it at all!
Puck.
We learn from a reliable exchange that the
the wealth of the United States is 1872 for
each person. We wish the fellow who has
SS7l.S5 belonging to us would fetch it in be-
fore we grow too old to enjoy wealth.--Ridd'e-
torn Transcript.
The Philadelphia Times says that Governor
Robinson is not setting Massachusetts, on
fire. This is probably meant for sarcasm;
but we would inform the Times that Massa-
chusettes has had enough of incendiary gov
ernors-LooceH citizen.
Annals of a quiet watering place. Lady
visitor-Oh, that is your vicar, is it! What
sort of vicar is hel Lady resident-Oh,
well, middling, High Church during the
season, you know, and Low all the rest of
the year!-LoHdon P,otch.
$50 Mrs. Jones' brother is dead" said
Gossip No. 1 to Gossip No. 3 $50 hear''
''Will she go into mouming.' GLOW is
that!" Why, you see it is only her half
Standardization independent.
~ tell you Bill, no girl can fool me. If
call on girl and she doesn't say much and
acts like she wants me to leave, and don't
shake hands with me when leave, and don't
ask me to call again, it's very seldom l ever
call back to see her. "-Ke,t,tcLy State Jour-
nal.
Little Mamma, what is color blindp'
Misunderstanding to tell the one col
or from another, dear'' Little Nell-'Then
1 dess the man that made my geography is
color blind. "--Mamma-''And why, petp'
Little Nell Clause he's got Greenland
painted yellow. PHILADELPHIA CaH
''If you don't marry me-" he exclaimed,
''pl take myself out of this hated world and
pllhaunt you as long as you liye!" Said
she: ''It will be more respectable than your
present haunts. Please stand a little farther
off. l never could bear the smell of alcohol
so soon after tea.-Bostoa Transcript.
woman who invaded West Bend, Wis,
and claimed to be the proprietor Of the town
and the whole county, was declared to be
crazy, and taken care of by the town officials.
This furnished precedent for locking up
the railroad men who labor under the delu-
sion that they own the earth.-Boston Globe.
A distinguished analyst has been making
a chemical examination of the water of the
holy well of Fem Zem, at Mecca, and has dis
covered it to be full of the worst kind of i'm
purities When this fact becomes generally
known certain Americans will stop drinking
the waters at Saratoga and go to Mecca. They
must have the worst-No7ristOOn, Herald.
Patient to doctor, who was shaking his
head like Burleigh-'Is there anything wrong
Doctor?" 'My friend, l really can't say till
after the autopsy" Client to hatter-'.What
is the use of the little glass inside your hats"
'::To enable you to see if the hat fits you sir"
Between friends-"Just imagine, my nephew
calls me an old rascal" at was very i'm
prudent, divulging family secrets. ''-Freuch
Fun.
1t is said that friedrich the Great never
took more than FIVE hours sleep. Therefore,
if he retired at 10 p. NJ. he must have arisen
at A. NJ, and if he arose at 8 A. NJ. he
must have retired at A. NJ. Now if he re-
tired at every morning he must have been
pretty lively boy and about the greatest
friedrich of his time. Now, then, why does
not some enterprising dime museum man,
armed with these facts, exhibit friedrich the
Greats fayorite night key.-Puet.
Dress and UHdreSs Ia Japan.
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