Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1884-06-14
SHOCK

| It shocks the modesty of Boston girl
| terribly to have person make bare men
ton of anything. Philadelphia Call.
| A Virginia girl married a tramp who turned
| out to be a duke. We've no pity for her
| She should have known what he was before
| she married him.-Boston Post.
An Irish magistrate asked prisoner if he
| was married. No." replied the man.
Then" replied his worship, amid peals of
laughter, sit is a good thing for your wife"
A wife is called a mans better half because
whenever he does not want her to do any
thing she remarks with significant emphasis ::
well, you better; that's ll.'-PhiIadelphia
Call.
''See here" he said to his clerk, 81 don't
mind letting you of day now and then to
attend your grandfather's funeral, but 1
think you ought to have the courtesy to send
few of the fish round to my house. .''-Bos-
ton Post.
A young gentleman of Austin, whose inan-
ces were not In the best condition, and whose
reputation foF industry and sObrIety was not
much better, applied to an Austin merchant
for Eosition as salesman. He had hard
ly had time to get fairly into the office when
he came out very abruptly. did the boss
hire you as salesman ?" asked friend who
was standing outside. mo, but he wanted
me to travel. "-Texas Siftings
Ibid you know papa when he was boy?"
asked Somsrville urohin of his mother, as
she dolsd him ont half dozen Strawberries
at table. ''Why, what a question, child!
Certainly not I didn't know y our papa un-
til he young man. Why do you ask ?"
"Oh, cause L wanted to know" "What
for ?" "'Cause you give him moro straw
berries than you do me, and you've known
me ever since I was orn."-Somerville
Journal.
Mutual concessions-A young gentleman
from Higbee, while calling on his girl here,
asked for her hand and heart and was &C
oepted He told her that he had something
On his mind for a long time, but was afraid
shs would get mad. She wanted to know
what 1t was and, then he made her promise
not to get mad. Said Ehe: 81 have two broth
ers in the penitentiary." THAT is nothing"
replied she, 81 have two brothers in the Ar
kansas legislature. ."-Booneville Topic.
What we're coming to-''Mary, I want a
messenger to send down down." said a lady
to her meid, ''The saleslady has sent me the
wrong bundle, and 1 want to inform the
forelady of her carelessnes. Is there anyone
disengaged?' 81 think not, ma'am; the cham
Der lady is busy with her rooms, and the
ki chen lady has visitors, her mother, the
washer lady, and her cousin, the ash gentle
man, having called. But perhaps the foot
gentleman or The coach gentleman are Olsen |
gagged. l wih see. e."-Somerville Journal.
THE VASE.
Frem the maddenipg crowd they stand apars,
The naidsns four and tha Work of Art;
And none might tell from sight alone
In which had culture ripest gSowG-
The Gotham Million f.is to SEE,
The Philadelphia Pedigree
Tho Best IN Mind of azure hue,
Or the soulful Soul fr M k4lamazoo-
For all lovei Art in a Reemly way.
With earnest soul AMI a capital A.
LeRg they worshped; but broke
The sacred STILL ess until up spoke
The Western one from the nameless place.
Who, bInEhing, said: What a Lovely vase"
Over three faces a sad smilo few,
And they edged away from Kalamazoo.
But Gothan's naughty soul stirred
70 cruRh the stranger with one small word.
Deity hiding reproof In praise.
She cries It's indeed, a lovely vase
But brief her unworthy triumph when
The lofty oas from the house OF Penn,
With the consciousness OF two graod papas,
Exc<ias: ut il quite lovely vAhs!'
And gauces round with anxious thrill,
aalttng the woId of Beacon Hill.
But the Boston maid smiles cortecuRee
And gently murmurs: "Oh, yardon me
I did not catch your remark, because
L was SO entranred with that charming vaIs!"
- James Jeffrey Roche