davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

Several nights later, the editor attended card parry, given by Clarissa. A gay company were assembled. Jim, too lazy to enjoy himself, widowed on sofa.
 "Clarissa," said the brother, "where is that newspaper had this morning. l want to show Felix that article concern ing a celebrated lunatic."
 @Why, Jim, Felix cares nothing for lunatics- l read the article and threw the paper aside"
 "Let's sec, what we have here," nut tured Jim, taking slip of paper from his pocket. l hereby swear that will never again associate with the prince of Wales,n
 "Hand me that :" exclaimed Felix, springing to his feet.
 "Whats the matter ?" asked Jim. The ladies and gentlemen were aston- ished. Then they burst into a roar of laughter.
 "I give up," said the editor, scratching his head. How did you work iii
 "Well, you see" replied Jim, while we were associating with that dog, you said that you never kept a pistol in your room. That gave me ap idea, which was ripened by the discovery of news paper account of the escape ofthe famous English lunatic. Blu. let's change the subject. I'm ,ired.n
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

THE people of London are mathe- matical. Recently when the announce ment was made that Minister Lowell had tine gut ::: :he ankle. sixty people called on him, but upon the discovery that he had gout in both ankles, sixty more came in to pay their respects to the other afflicted joint. The English are a great people. and if they could only be induced to study the language which strangely has derived its name from them, a bond of sincere attachment might spring up be- tween Mir Bull and Uncle Samuel.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

MR. BLAINE's letter of acceptance, whether it be read by the light of the partisan or patriotic candle, is a docu- ment of statesman.like utterance. His idea of the protection which this country owes to its humblest citizen both at home and abroad, may only be piece oi glitter to catch the eye of the natural ized irishman-for our adopted citizens always need more protection than the na- tives-but its expression in such manly terms, cannot fail to stir the pride of every American. A citizen fthe United States should be the proudest man on Earth not proud of his wealth or individual im- portance-but proud of the great people of whom he is a.part.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

MR. HENDRICKS should have his pie ture revised and corrected. The old cuts used in 1876 wear a weary expression, and do no not hold the great politician up in the light of any too much advantage. Some of the country papers having sold the Hendricks cuts to the type ioundries, are using the Tilden electrotype. This is unjust, but the editors having heard that a part of the old ticket had been re- elected, decided that it made no differ ence which piece.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

THE tariff reformers, headed by Mir. Watterson, think that they have gained a great victory by the insertion of the word exclusively !" in the democratic platform Yes, exclusively is a good word. l, is larger and shows more progress than " only" Every party should move for ward and outgrow its small verbal clothes
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

THE opening chapters of a new story
 by Henry James is presented by the cur rent number of the Century. Some of
 Mir. James friends fear that he will get ipk on his kid gloves
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

Al Indian named Womankiller, alias Galcafehez, was hanged at Fort Smith, Ark, last week. Shankbone, Hairiip, Snakeeater and Jigwhistler are now under seatence of death.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

THE French have insulted the German flag. Just at present Bismarck no doubt feels a delicacy in ivading France, for cholera is sometimes more potent than bulletS. Marseilles is we'll fortified. \
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

not ansser to individual correspondents rather than to swell the volume, prompts this article.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

VIOLENT journalism in Hot Springs has had its day. The press of that city is now respectful in tone, and is aiding greatly in the development of that wonderful city. A health resort with an unhealthful press was rather incongruous
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

WHEN the cholera succeeds in zain- ing foothold in this county, the medi- cal journals and health officers will tell us how it could have been kept out.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

Ir is to be hoped that Tilden vlll live long enough to assist in the production of Clevelands lefrer of accepsance.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

THE presentious Flower will now fade. Avaunt, dog fennel. Take him away.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

Manuscripts unaccompanied by stamps, vill not be returned. We do not pay for natter unless II be specially ordered.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

klkltC.
 Alaska Glaciers.-After a visit to some Of the Alaska glaciers, Mir Thomas Nee han states that beneath the Muir glacier, said to be 100 miles long, flows a rapid torrent, which he estimates to be 100 feet wide and four feet in an average depth. and which runs summer and winter with out interruption. At it's termination the glacier hangs over the sea, and gives of ioebergs Mir. Meehan remarks tha, the great ice-sheets have their lakes, rapids, waterfalls, hills and valleys; tha, the water-wa change their courses a, times through the melting; and tha, melting ,Pfogresses freely in the suns rays. but not in the shade.
 Iupiters Great Spot-Pfof. C. W. Hough, director of the Dearborn observ- atory, favors the theory that the msch- discussed red spot on Jupise,, which be- came visible several yean ago and has just disappeared, is really . portion of the sohd body cf the plsset which is ohscured by clouds during long seasons. This view is confirmed by the fact that Hook and Csssini, in the years I66l, l66s and Io66, observed great spot oa Jupiser, which spot reappeared aad vanished aght times betueen I66s and I7oa, and vas invisible hom the lafssr ysar until i7'5. is longest period of visihilisy being three years and cf absence Eve yeaxx
The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-07-26

much of their rigidity.
 "That was a mean trick you served me last night, Jim"
 "Oh, you mean about that dog ?"
 "Yes, 1 do."
 Well, you see, would have gone over to the house, but couldn't open the gate and didn't feel like climbing the fence"
 "Why didn't you call some one?'
 |" did. A man came out and told him that I'd like to see the owner of that dog. Said that he had gone down into the country, and I. didn't think it worth while to wait until he came back. Eel low said that he had authority to sell the dog in case wanted to buy him, but as l didn't care about engaging in that kind of speculation. came on home and went to bed. Thought I'd send father out to. day and let him look at the animals
 :" Jim, it was my intention to whip you. i"
 "Ofcourse," Jim replied, lazily seating himself " bat you sss the weather is not propitious for such exestion. mocked down an lrishman this morning, but found the exercise uncomfortabaA"
 Clarissa Es-entered tho room, ard asked if the kentleusn were quaneling. Oh, no. Felix had been annoyed hy dog, and vas not in . good humor.
 The young lady, with . sly twinkle in her eyes, asked Felix to relate the story of his adventure. He complied, and
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
Millions in q Snowflake.

Some of the imaginative and won
derfully learned German scholars tell
US that every snowflake is inhabited
by happy little beings, who are born,
hold their revels, and live their long
lives of happiness and delight, die and
are buried. all during the descent of
the snowflake from the world of
clouds to the solid land. / do not
know whether to believe scholars or
not. They are of that same school
which tells you that every square foot
of air possesses some 100000 or 10,
100000 of more or less perfect little
beings, and that at every ordinary
breath we destroy a million, more or
less, of these happy lives. The sigh
of a happy lover is supposed to swal-
low up about 100000. They insist
that the dust which will, as all know.
accumulate in the most secret and
secure places, is merely the remains
of millions and billions of those little
beings who have died of old age.
All this, of course, is mere specula-
ton. But do know that the snow is,
in some parts of the world, very
thickly inhabited. 1 have seen new
snow in Idaho, black with little in
sects. They call them snow fieas.
They are lively as possible, and will
blacken your footprints, walk as fast
as you may. They are found only on
the high mountains, and only in very
fresh and deep snow. They, of course,
do not annoy yeu in any way. They
are infinitely smaller than the ordi-
nary flea, but exactly the same in loco
motion.-TJoaquin Miller.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
Burning or Burial.

Congress will soon be asked to legal
ize cremation in the district. The lot
for the furnace has been given and an
ASSOCIATION has been formed. There
are large number of people in this
country who would prefer burning to
burial, but they belong, as a rule, to
the more thoughtful, exclusive class
to whom all vulgar notoriety is re-
pulsive. The needless publicity given
by DIR. LIE Nome and his successors in
the management of his crematory to
all incinerations in it has, doubtless,
deferred many persons from using it
in the disposal of their dead.
DIFF the society in Washington city
will build furnace no less repulsive
in its surroundings than the LIE Moyne
and keep the rites conducted in it as
decently private as other obsequies,
there will be great probability of its
immediate and general use. It would
then pay as a business enterprise, and
as soon as incinerating furnaces pay
we shall have them in every city, and
a man can order the disposal of his
own remains as suits his own convic-
ton or feeling, which is only proper
and right.
The practice of cremation is gaining
ground rapidly in Europe. The Eng
ish Free Ma5ons in Dorsetshire Gre
mated the body of Warren Hanham
the other day, and formally recognized
that mode of destroying the dead as a
part of their proper ritual. This was
in direct opposition to the dictation of
Home Secretary Cross, who pronounc-
ed the rite as contrary to the spirit of
English law and CUSTOM" In Italy,
Germany, France and Spain, crema-
lions are so frequent as not to attract
notice. In Portugal they have just
been obligatory by law in all cases of
epidemics or virulent contagious
diseases.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
SUNDAY SMILES.

A gasman always sings in long
meter.
They say dogs can't reason, but no
one will doubt that a dog tries to
reach conclusion when he chases his
tail.
; A Somerville young lady is said to
possess mania for starting fires.
She will get over that when she is
married.
eyes, sir" said Jinkins, "Smithers is
man who keeps his word; but then
he has to-" "How IS that?" asked
Jones. Because no one will take il"
"Ahl" remarked Fogg, as he gazed
bashfully at the ballet-girls, ''now 1
understand the full significance Of the
passage, The body is more than raj
ment.'"
"Oh, professor" exclaimed sentiment
tai old Mrs. Fishwacker, during a pri-
vate organ recital in her new music
room, ''do pull out that sweet nux
vomica once moreH
Old gentlemau-"Ah, Mrs. B.. did
you keep diary during your visit to
the country ?" Mrs. B. Indignantly
-"No, sir, 1 didn't; the family bought
milk from the neighbors."
Widow Van Colt says: mo Chris
tian can afford to use tobacco" To-
bacco is awfully high, that's fact.
We hope Mrs. Van Colt will use her
influence to have the tax reduced.
At school at Wallsend, near New
castle, the master asked class of boys
the meaning of the word appetite"
and after a brief pause, one little boy
said: 81 know sir; when I'm eatin'
TN 'appy, and when I'm done I'm
tight"
Scientists now boldly declare that
this earth was peopled fifty million
years before Adam was born. We are
not prepared to dispute this assertion
in the least. We have always won
dered how mankind could learn so
much deviltry in only six thousand
years. -
"Are all Smyrna rugs alike?" Store
keeper-"No, indeed; there is great,
a very great difference in Smyrna
rugs" Customer-"What is the prin-
cipal point of difference?" Store
keeper-"Well, some Smyrna rugs are
Smyrna rugs, but most Smyrna rugs
are not Smyrna rugs"
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21

present year, of $4,000, because
the state government dared
not attack the cormorants that as
syme to prey on all they survey alone
for their own selfish, sordId ends.
Fence cutters may so dread conviction
and Imprisonment in penitentiary
walls, as to stop unlawful practices,
but the vile evil that led to all this
lawlessness in Texas is still left with
its power to rob. The commune may
for time sleep; but, unless the gov
eminent cradle ite the evil root, it will
break out at some not distant day
with 1edoubled fury. The Democratic
party, at Galveston, declared against
the ''cormorant and the commune
When Democracy assemblies this year
in solemn consultation, let it tell in
unmistakable words what is meant in
this declaration, and apply it's ex.
pressed antagonism to its proper sub
iects in Texas
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21

A LATE copy of the Glasgow, Scot
land, Herald is before US. In looking
over its advertising columns we are
enabled to make a comparison be-
tween wages paid in the old country
and in this. Under Situations Va
cant" is found an advertisement for a
manager to take charge of an extern
sive branch business, salary SIS per
week, and per cent interest in net
profits; "civil service vacancies" are
announced, salaries ranging from S400
to 1920; a Shorthand clerk is wanted
at $3.50; clerk is wanted of full ex-
perience in the iron business, who can
correspond in English, German and
French and who writes shorthand, at
$1100; an engineer who can otherwise
be a handy man is wanted at $500 a
year; a ''head laundress" for a laundry
is wanted at 500 per annum; super
intending milliner, who can buy goods
and conduct a fashionable business, is
wanted at $500 a year; a ''house table
maid" is wanted at $50 a year: kitchen
servant and mixer, ss5; experienced
servant for general work, good washer
and ironer, $50 a year. In giving the
salaries in dollars we have multiplied
the number of pounds offered by five,
when 1t is known pound is only
$4S3.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
Songs Never Sung

How does that verse run? Something like
this, isn'tit?
There are who touch the magic string.
ana noisy fame Is prOund to win them;
Alas! Tor those who never sing,
But die with all their music In them"
Yes, that's beautiful, pathetic and true"
said your representative. The poet alludes
10 peop!e VINO are somehow suppressed, and
never get their full allowance of JOY and air.
Which remind me of a letter shown me the
other day by HIsCoX * Co., of New York
signed by Mr.. L. &. Williams, of Chapman,
Snyder county, Pa, prominent business man
Of that place. He writes:
81 have suffered with asthma for over forty
years, and had a terrible attack in December
and January, 1882. 1 hardly know what
prompted me to take PARKER's Tonic. ibid
so, and the first day took four doses. The
effect aStonished me. That night slept as If
nothing was the matter with me, and have
ever since. l have had colds since, but no
asthma. My breathing is now as perfect as If
had never known that disease. II you know
OF any one who has asthma tell MN IN my
name that PARKER's Tonic will cure it-even
after forty years" There was a man who es-
capped the fate of those whom the poet laments.
This preparation. which has heretofore been
known as PARKER'S GINGER TONIC, Will here,
after be advertised and sod under the name OF
PARKER 8 TONIC. Inasmuch as ginger Is really
an unimportant ingredient, and unprtncipleo
dealers are constantly deceiving their custom
| erS by substituting inferior preparations undel
the name OF ginger, we drop the misleading
| word.
| ton itself, and all bottles remaining in tn
| hands OF dealers, wrapped under the name o
| PARKER'S GINGER Tonic contain the gen
| ulne medicine II the fac-simile signature o
| HISCOX & Co. is at the bottom of the OUTSIDE
| wrapper. febl6 -desat-weow.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
SHIPS OF THE LINZ.

The sailor sat in the yine-wre3thed porch.
With yOuHgSter upon his knee;
And both We're talking about the ships
That travel across The sea.
FAIR pictures of human life they seemed II
10 him who could understand
how soon 10 ruin and wreck they'd GO,
Were 1t not for guiding hand.
Ard the boy, whose fancy was QUICK to catch
The light that his father gave,
With an eager eye and a cunning smile
Looked out on the dancing wave,
There, father there are a lot Of ships
MIN fb tneF sas all spread q hg
And that little one there is me ~
LAY, ay!" said the sailor. nowise 10th
To humOr the pretty within;
And like a sermon out of q text
This phantaSy came to him
over the Self-Same ocean we go,
Whether for toll or for sport;
From Inherent harbOrs starting out
10 meet at the S~lf-Same port.
80 quick to quarrel, so ready to fight,
Whoever may be the foe,
The man-of-war, with guns all set,
Goes out, and his course we know.
The business man, too shrewd and sharp
To let good bargain slip,
With canvass spread to the favoring breeze,
Goes out as workmanship.
And he who's ready to lend hand
And give us word of cheer
When the clouds hang low and the waves run
And we're chased by privateer-
Oh, what is he but jolly-bOat
On whom the sailors depend
A jOlly-boat that will always fiOat,i
However the storms descend
"And he who stands on a rocky shore
And watches the tossing wave,
Intent to rescue the drowning soul,
All eager to Succor and save,
| A human life boat, ny boy, is he,
And angels alone can know
| How many he's snatched from the cruel wave,
The mercileSS undertOw.
! "And here is one on a pleasure yacht,
Who sails along at his ease,
| But has not ballast enough, my boy,
To travel on bOiSterOuS seas;
| So brave in color, so trinity built,
| so natt1ly-nautical planned,
| IT'S better for him and his lazy crew
| To keep within sight of land.
| "Ah, many a boat that seems firm and true,
| Everywhere taut and Staunch,
| Will prove itself an unSeawOrthy hulk
| AS soon as it leaves the launch;
| And some for smooth waters are only built,
While others appear their best
| When, out on an ocean that's tempest-toSsed,
| They're put to mighty test.
''But whatever direction we may take,
| Whatever may be our rig
| Frigate, schooner, clipper, skiff,
| Jollyboat, bark or brig
| We come at last to the self-same port,
| To an unknown, distant shore,
| Where we drop our anchors and furl our sail
| And follow the sea no more"
I-[JOSephine Pollard, in N. Y. Independent.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
A LEAP YEAR DILEMMA.

BY MALE FLIRT.
Miss Jennie is windsome girl
The fairest lass of many;
And would be heartl6SS churl
Did not love Miss Jennie.
But when into my list ming ear
Her tide of passion guShes,
scream and run away, for fear
She'll see my tell-tale bushes.
Miss Susie is so sweet and mild
And loves me, oh! so dearly,
1 can't reject the little child
'TwOuld drive her crazy, nearly,
But as she hangs upon the gate
And sings her hopeless sorrow.
murmur: sit is getting late,
Please come around tomorrow
And there Is rosy, romping Bell
And there is proud Ophelia-
And penSive, lOfty-minded Nell,
And prattling little Della,
And am wooed by Eloise,
And courted, too, by Jessie,
While Maggie falls upon her knees.
And ditto charming Bessie.
There's still another-homely She
The gaunt, uncouth Eliza
When first she came a-wOoing me,
Oh, how did despise herI
But as she fondly fingered near
There fell like dripping honey,
This sweet assurance on my ear
She had heap of money!
So, though sigh for Jennie's curls
And Della so impassiOned,
And banker for the other girls
So Sweetly, grandly fashioned,
1t seems decreed that / should part
From all these charming witches
And sacrifice my manly heart
To gaunt ELIAS riches!
Cincinnati Saturday Night
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21

1t is well known, says the Nation,
that the urns found in Roman burial
grounds, and containing the remains
of cremated bodies, are often covered
with clay cups OF dishes. The object
of these dishes was supposed to have
been to contain spices, which sent
forth agreeable odors during the pro-
cess of cremation. Herr Dahlien, a
well-known German arch@ologist,
was able to verify this view in the
following manner: He had obtained
a dish of this kind, which was broken
and after cementing it, had placed it
upon stone for the purpose of drying
the cement. Shortly after ward he
noticed a strong, and by no means I'M
pleasant odor proceeding from the
heated dish. 1t seems, therefore, that
the ingredients burned in the dish
SOME fifteen centuries ago bad its
traces behind which announced their
presence upon being heated.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
A Case not Beyond Help.

DIR. Fl. M. Hinsdale, Kenawee, ILL
nois, advises us of a remarkable cure
of con sumption. He says: "a neigh
boris wife was attacked with violent
lung disease, and pronounced beyond
help from quick consumption. AS
last resort the family was persuaded
to try DR.. VIM. Halls Balsam for the
Lungs. To the establishment of all.
by the time she had used one half
dozen bottles she was about the house
doing her own work. 1 saw her at
her worst and had no idea she could
recover" febI2-d&W
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
The Herd Law is Coming.


It has been said that coming events
cast their shadows before" and with
out doubt the present fence cutting
troubles in Texas are a prelude to the
necessity of herd law being passed.
No one believes that any laws now
proposed by the legislature will stop
these troubles. am neither propf ct
nor the son of a prophet, nor candi-
date for the legislature, but l will
make prediction that the only law
that can be passed that will stop these
troubles will be a herd law, that Will
compel every man to herd or enclose
his stock on his own lands.
l very well know that East and
Middle Texas would not now accept
a herd law. But should the commun-
istic ideas of the West extend to this
country and the fences be cut during
the crop season, as they are liable to
be, then the people would rise up as
one man in favor of strict herd law.
The herd law is the poor mans friend,
as / have seen it in other states where
it has been adopted; the poor man has
to fence his own land against his own
and his neigborS' stock, or if he is a
renter, he has to pay his pro rata for
fencing the lands he cultivates. in in
creased rents; while, if the stock of
this country are herded, thousands of
acres of good land, now Iy-
ing idle, could be cultivated at
low rates of rent; or sold to poor men
and cultivated, who are not able to buy
the land and fence it, Such a law
would preclude the annual destruc-
ton of crops, which now occurs, from
stock breaking into the fields, which
now so often occurs; for now no one
knows but that his years labor may
he destroyed in one night by his
neighbours stock.'
A stock law would probably do
more to encourage immigration into
this country than any other means
that could be adopted, for the poor
immigrant could buy land and go to
farming without the expense of fenc-
ing.
The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1884-02-21
ChiIls and fever. acme. bilious and

Chills and fever, ague, bilious and
malarial fevers yield at once to
Xxi Chill Cure. Take one bottle
according to directions and if it does
not benefit you return bottle to dealer
and he will refund amount paid for it.
All druggists. J.J. s. W. II. Tobin,
Austin M. D. Conklin s. Co., pro-
prietors and wholesale druggists,
Houston, Texas. cod