davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
The Girl Who ElOpes.

The reasons for leaving the paternal
roof between two days in company
with q young man appear to be varied.
Sometimes d cruel parent selects hus-
band without asking the daughters
consent. Oftener some would-be hus-
band selects the daughter and the old
man won't consent, thus necessitating
an elopement for the double purpose of
getting married and escaping the pa
ternal boot. On occasion the elope-
ment is necessary to avoid the revolver
or shotgun of another fellow who has
taken a notion to the girl. Ordinarily
elopements do not take place if the
course of true love meets with no OBJ
stacle in the home of either member
of the seeking to-be-wedded couple.
Girls are freakish, however, and
sometimes run away to be married for
no apparent cause whatever. 1t will
be remembered that daughter of the
immortal Mr.. Wardle was getting
ready to run away with the famous
Pickwickian without so much as sug-
costing to her adorable Snodgrass the
proprlety of asking her father whether
he had any objections to the wedding
taking place at home in the usual way
The sixteen-year old daughter of an
ex-alderman of Long Island City has
made herself famous by an elopement
of this kind. She was pretty and rich,
and answered to the charming name of
Fanny. Her brother had friend
named Walter, who also was rich,
good-looking and %. Walter visited
the brother and fell in love with Fanny,
which, under the circumstances, was
natural enough. Nobody had any OBJ
lection to Walter or the match, and if
Walter had asked for Fanny she would
have been given to him.
But Walter and Fanny concluded to
be romantic and run away to get mar
ried. Fanny spent the day kissing her
mother and wondering what in the liV-
ing world she would wear to get mar
ried in. She kissed her mother good
night at 10 O'Clock, went to her room,
packed her satchel, met her lover, and
posted to the city of New York, where
they were married, after which note
was sent home, and the maternal bless
ing, which they might have had by
word of mouth for the asking, was tel
cSldpuCu W lHCAi, 0hU ehOy "CuI vi
their wedding tour rejoicing.
The only explanation that can be
given for this highly gratuitous elope-
ment is that it runs in the family. Two
older sisters of Fanny have secured
husbands by this method. Whether
the mother of these clipping daugters
set the example by clipping herself is
not reported, but as the clipping ten
dency seems to be irresistible IN the
blood, it is not at all improbable. If
Fanny's mother has any more unmar-
ried daughters, however, who develop
an alarming tendency to KISS her on
any particular day, she should employ
detectives at once to shadow the over
affectionate girl, unless she wants the
elopement to succeed. The clipping
tendency is too strong in that family to
be checked by anything short of the
most rigorous measures.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12

are travelling. The boys may go fish
ing and the girls 60 hunting flowers,
or both may go toy ether and each share
the others enjoyment.
met two of such family the other
day in the pine woods, mile from the
hotel. l did not know them, nor they
me. l was digging up the bulb of a
plant, and as it came out of the ground
heard an exclamation, 'sIt is dubious
after all, Tom" Then / saw the bright
| and pleasant countenance of seven
teen-year old girl, who had come. She
had the same curiosity about the flow
ers which l had. Then for while she
and her brother Tom rambled along
with me. They were out for a walk.
That to them meant keen enjoyment of
pretty much all they saw. Trees, flow
ers, animals, the very skies and clouds
were more or less subjects of intelli-
gent observation to them. She caught
half dozen lizards as we walked
along, handled them gently, examined
them carefully and let them 90 I'M
harmed. They talked of the fishing.
He had seen me going or coming in.
He knew all about the fishing in his
own part of the country, and great
deal about the habits of the fish. The
Two, brother and sister, discussed one
with another the flowers and animals.
Clearly they had been brought up
from childhood to take a keen inter-
est in the environments of country
life. And l was not surprised when
she caught sight of an engraved gem in
my ring, to find that at II she, and at
Is he, knew enough about art to talk
intelligently and without blunders. We
had very pleasant chat as we strolled
hither and thither in the old pine
woods; and they two were very happy
children. | doubt not they confer a
great deal of happiness and do a great
deal of good in the circle in which they
live. We met in the woods, and they
left me in the woods, and | did not see
them again. In the hotel 1 looked
around at some hundreds of faces, and
failed to see those. Nor was there any
other young girls face there which
seemed to have any ideas beyond the
circle described on the floor by the edge
of skirt.
The moral of this somewhat rambling
letter is this Teach your young people
how to be happy, how to enjoy life,
how to make others happy. Give them
interests in the things which surround
life. Don't send them to Europe until
they have some worthy tastes and de-
sires to be intelligently gratified by
their going. If they can not find pleas
ure in studying nature and its products,
don't take them to Florida.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
The Object of Education.
From a Florida Letter.


Every man ought to have hobby
something to enjoy in total distinction
from work. Every woman ought to
have one. Women need hobbies more
than men. There is an awful amount
of bosh written about the education OF
woman and her place in the social sys-
TEN. The sole purpose of all educa-
ton is to enable the boy or girl to be
happy and confer happiness. This is
the whole duty of man. Happiness
here and forever, for yourself and those
on whom you can confer it, is the pur-
pose of your existence. In how many
systems of education, loaded with the
idea of making the student fit for labor,
does the all-important consideration
enter of teaching him how to be happy
when he is not at work, where and how
to find what will surely be the greatest
need of his life-rest.
Here and there in the world are rare
exceptions to the general rule. There
is sometimes family in which the
father and mother know how to enjoy
life sensibly in its hours of play or rest,
and around them grow up boys and
girls fit to live, fit to do all the duties
of life, fit to make their own lives happy
and useful. From childhood they have
known that life is surrounded by thou
sands of wonders, whether of mans
making or of Gods creation. Nature
and art alike furnish them with sources
of knowledge and pleasure. You don't
see those children dawdling around
hotel drawing rooms when the family
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
A HUMORIST'S ROMANCE.
The Courtship. of Burdette and the Wife
for Whom He Tenderly Carried.
Decatur Republican.

Decatur Republican.
Carrie Burdette, wife of Robert j.
Burdette, died at Ardmore, Pa, Mon
day. She was an invalid from her
marriage, and the great humorist cared
for her as he would babe, giving her
every possible comfort. Mrs. Bur-
dette was the daughter of Auren' Gar
rett, of Peoria, and was married to
Burdette some fifteen years ago. Her
father was opposed to Bob, and he
made the course of true love of the
young couple anything but smooth.
Bob was clerk in the postoffice at
that time, and Carrie was a beautiful
young lady, but with a will of her own
that more than matched that of her
father.
One day the old man commanded her
to discard Bob. She refused and vio-
lent alteration ensued. Carrie had an
underlined trouble with her heat that
this precipitated. She was stricken
down with a spasm. They sent for
Bob and he found her pale and lifeless
on the sofa. Here she managed to ex-
press wish that they might be mar
ried before she died, and a clergyman
was sent for. The marriage of the
great humorist was celebrated amid
tears and signs, the orange blossoms
absent and only the pallor of the dying
face looking out from among the pill
lows. Strange to say she Immediately
began to recover and soon regained her
former strength. With it, however,
was an unaccountable malady.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
A Good Well.
Arkansaw Traveller.

ArKdnSdW Traveller.
Several days ago northern gentle
man came to Little Rock and announced
his intention of buying home. 81 am
not so particular with regard to the
house and grounds" said he, Gas am
about the water. There must be well
of cold water.n
"Think I've got the very place. re-
piled an old fellow whose shirt bosom
was streaked with tobacco juice.
'Meet me here tomorrow"
The next day the old fellow came
down and conducted the northern gen.
tleman to his premises.
"House is not very good" said the
nothern gentleman.
"No, nothin' EXTRA
"Grounds not very pleasing"
"No great shakes. Let's try the
water"
He drew bucket of water from the
well, and when the northern gentleman
dank his teeth chartered.
"Why, that's the coolest water ever
drank"
The northern gentleman was so much
pleased that he bought the place with
out further questioning, seeing that the
old fellow was not anxious to sell, and
fearing that he might change his
mind.
Several days afterwards, the north
ern gentleman sought the old fellow
and said:
81 ought to take a gun and shoot
you, you swindling scoundrel."
"What's the matter?" looking up in
surprise.
''Matter! why that water is so warm
[ can't drink it. bought it with the
understanding that it was cold"
"Was cold when you bought it, pod
ner."
ssBut it's warm now.'
eyes, for you see, the ice has melted.
No trouble to make that water cold,
podner. All you've got to do is to
throw in a cart load of ice. No well is
any account unless you take care of it.
Pm in the ice business. Would like to
have your trade"
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12

some inexplicable cause he could not
or would not hear us, though We saw
his form quite plainly in the distance.
Steps were heard in pursuit of US,
and the angry curses of the burglar
reached our terror-stricken ears, when
an inspiration seized Mabel. She put
her little silver whistle to her lips and
blew till its peculiar note rang out like
clarion on the still air.
The Sound of hasty footsteps ap-
preaching from another direction be-
came audible; but whether they were
for good or ill we could not tell. Nab
had lost her courage, and was leaning
on me, half tainting, when voice
calling in English, "Hallo! What is
the matterp What are you rascals
doingp" seemed to put new life int
her.
Two men ran towards us, one OF
whom, to our amazement and delight,
we recognized as Sidney Weir, our
travelling companion.
We clung to him, and lowered over
him with tears, hysterical laughter and
incoherent thanks, and did not notice
that during our explanations both rob-
Der and guard had disappeared. Mr..
Weir said that he had felt uneasy at
leaving us alone in the little station,
and, finding another belated traveller,
they had whiled away the night smok-
ing and walking up and down on the
road near at hand. He had not told
of his change of plans, thinking it
might annoy us. When he saw the
rough lot of men who collected about
the coffee-room, he was very glad he
had waited, for he thought we might
be subjected to annoyance, if nothing
worse. The sound of Mabel's whistle
had reached his ears as signal of dis
tress, and he would never feel suffi-
GENTLY thankful that he had given her
the little toy.
"What l fail to understand is this
rascally guard deserving his post SO
shamefully," said our rescuer, ringing
a huge bell which hung near.
Presently an astonished group of
walters and porters gathered round us
with lights, and began asking thou
sand questions. One of the new-com-
ers stumbled over something lying in
dark corner.
"What is this?" he cried. "Moser
the guard in a drunken sleep! He will
lose his place for this, and deserves it
tool"
It was afterwards discovered that
Anton Moser, the real guard had been
drugged by two ruffians, one of whom
had stolen his lantern and cap, while
the other made his daring attempt upon
Mabel and me.
We had lost all interest in the fete at
San Vito, and, like frightened disobe-
dent children, our only wish was to re-
turn home, if the little hotel we had
left could be called home. Sidney Weir
accompanied us and, when uncle Wal
lace returned. he found sutton for
Mabel's hand awaiting his approval.
The approval was not withheld, as
Mab's face betrayed that her heart had
found it's idol
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
BY TIE BROOKSIDE.
There are tassels on the birches,
Waving yellow Ger the stream;

There are tassels on the birches,
Waving yellow Ger the stream;
Scattering golden dust
To mingle with its CLEAN,
There are blossoms on the naples,
Blossoms red as robins breast;
They are dropping, dropping silently,
On wayelets white top crest.
There are pussies on the willows,
PUSHES white and silver gray
That fall down from the brookside,
Then drifting run away;
Green leaves are family showing,
Just peeping, peeping through,
Between the waving tassels,
On the pussy willow too;
And the red, red maple blossoms,
Step daintiiy aside,
That rich and growing banners green
May shade the bright broOkside.
Spring beauties gleam amid the grass,
Blue violets peep over;
Play hide and seek, the whole day long,
With the wind, the tickle rover;
There's a warbling mid the branches;
There's a humming through the trees;
An ineXpressible sweetness
From each and all these;
A something can not tell you,
Dame Nature would not contide,
II you 20, you will hear it all,
Down by the sweet brookside.
Inter Ocean.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12

One of the drawbacks to the pleasure
of angling is that if you bring home a
string of which you are proud, some en-
vious son of Walton is liable to insinu-
ate that you caught post norton trout.
II Lowell Courier.
One of the results of the panic is the
fact, cabled from London, that several
wealthy americans abroad will be
obliged to return home Immediately.
And another that several at.home will
want to 60 DISQUALIFICATION Post.
Jobbins didn't mean it for swearing
when he found, one night, that his
barn-door had disappeared, and re-
marked that it was ssa door-gone
shame. ~ Yonkers Gazette.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
JUBILEE HYMN.
Almighty god Of nations hear

Almighty god Of nations hear
Our grateful song of praise, ri z~
Which now with heart sincere we raise,
For Thy redeeming grace.
Savior, Thou didst on earth appear
To save ruined world;
Dids't die on Calvary's rugged hill
To bless with peace untold.
Spirit, divine, tits Thou that leads
The wandering sons of men
To Christ, the sinners only hope,
For pardon, peace and Heaven.
HALL Triune God, the Three in One,
One undivided three,
To Thee with grateful heart we raise
Our song OF jubilee.
Ye beasts that roam In deserts wild,
And fowls that throng the groves,
Ye fish that sweep the stormy deep,
Make known how Jesus loves.
Waves, winds and hurricanes declare,
Spread forth His mighty power;
Sun, moon and stars, with all Heaven host
Join in this gladstone hour.
May we, the sons of Adams host,
When all our tolls are o'er,
Join with the blood washed, happy throng,
On the eternal shore.
Detroit Free Press.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12
TRAIN TIME.
The Drummer Who Knew Pretty Well
What He Was Betting On.

"We are running pretty fast now,
amt we?" said drummer to his COM
panion, as the train whizzed along at a
lively rate. cat least thirty miles an
hour,'' replied the other. s'Thirty
miles! We haint going less than a
mile minute.'' ssYou are way off.
We are not going bit faster than
thirty-fve miles an hour at the outside.
l have been riding on trains for twenty
years, and you can't fool me on speed.
I've got it down so fine l can tell within
a mile or two of just how fast we are
running" '"You can, chi" replied the
first speaker; 'you think you have it
down fine, Ell? Now, I'll just bet you
S. can guess closer to the number of
seconds it takes us to run from one
mile to another than you can. Is it a
go?" 1t was "go." The money was
put up in another drummer's hands,
and he took out his watch and stood up
IN the aisle so neither of the wagerers
could see his ticker. The passengers
who had overheard the conversation
gathered around to see how the bet
would come out. As white mile post
whizzed past the window the re.eree
cried, "Now!"
The contestants looked out of the
window at the line of wire fence and
procession of fast-disappearing tele-
graph poles. "Time!" cried the drum
mer in the aisle, as the next mile post
showed itself in one fleeing instant.
Every eye was turned to the makers of
the wager. According to agreement
they were to write out the number of
seconds they guessed and hand the
paper to the referee. The man who
chad it down fine'' did this very
promptly, but the one who started the
conversation was slow. He had some
figuring to do with his lead pencil.
There was considerable excitement
among the on-lookers, and several side
bets were made. In few moments
the drummer had completed his calcu-
lations, and the referee announced ::
"Charley puts it at one minute and
forty seconds. Bob makes it one min
ute and twenty-five seconds. The
actual time by the watch was one min
ute and twenty-four seconds. Bob
wins.'' The man who chad it down
fine," but missed it by fifteen seconds
and lost his money, took his defeat IN
good humor, but begged Bob to tell
him how he had worked it.
81 hadn't ought to give it away"
said Bob, "'cause I've been maxim
about S15 a week with it all winter. 1
usually hit it to the second, but this
time forgot that I'd had only one
drink this morning." "What has your
drinks got to do with it, I'd like to
know?" "Why, you see, it takes at
least four drinks to settle my pulse
down SO that 1 can rely on it to the
very second"
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12

For thousands Of years it was the
practice among the Chinese coopers to
place boy inside the barrel to hold up
the head while the hoops were tighten
ed. History does not explain how the
boy was released, but it is supposed he
was left to fast until he could crawl
out at the bung hole.
"What is wanted in this country"
said the bride as she examined the we'd
ding presents, 'sis silver-service re-
form; that set is plated"
Sixty cigars for every man, woman
and child were made in and imported
into this country last year.
McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-06-12

A mule with five legs has been born
in Alabama. We shall look for large
falling off in the population of that
state within the next SIX or eight years.
Free Press.
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1884-04-18
JURY SERVyCE

In the economy of the universe nothing
occurs without cause, nothing without effect.
The recent riot in Cincinnati has u lesson
TO teach which the people Of this country
should not be slow TO learn There is OBJ
servant among us everywhere "a desire TO
shirk service ON the jury. No sooner is n
man summoned on the grand or petit panel
than, after the manner of the unwilling
guests in the Bible, "They begin with one
accord TO make excuse" Some of these
excuses are very lame. AT the same time
the very men who are most unwilling to
serve themselves are loudest In complaint If
their own causes are tried before ANYTHING
but picked panel of more than average
intelligence. Cases of jury packing are not
common among us, but the eyer-present
danger Of Incompetent juries must remain
while our best citizens regard jury service
US hardship too great 10 be borne even for
the public good Such cases as the recent
riot are the direct outgrowth of not so much
direct jury packing as of allowing incom-
petent men to serve as jurors The neglect
Of salatary precautions in this regard is the
height of folly, and the sooner it comes SO
ID be regarded by our citizens and law Off.
GERS, the sooner are we secure from the real
though not apparent danger of mob law
taking the place of unsatisfactory Justice
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1884-04-18
THE RELIEF EXPEDITION.

Lieut.. Greedy and his crew having failed
to receive the intended relief from the steam
SHY Proteus, last summer, on account of the
stubborn resistance of the ice have now en-
tered on the closing quarter of their third
year in the Arctic seas, presumably in the
vicinity Of Lady Franklin Bay.
IL is comfort TO the people of the United
States, in whose service these brave men are
risking life and health, to know that, within
iisw days the United States flagship iPhetls
Lieut.. Schley in command, will set forth 70
attempt the rescue of the ice-bound Greely
party, and will be closely followed by the
Bear, another United States steamship, and
the Alert, which is the gift of Great Britain
bestowed in courteous remembrance of the
gift by the United States to England of the
Resolute, discovered in September, 1856, of
the west shore Of Baffin's Bay, by Captain
Buddington, brought safe and sound to New
London, and afterwards despatched in com
plete order to the English shores as an offer.
ing to the British Nation.
The relief expedition, it is confidently
hoped, will restore the absent mariners 10
their friends and country at a period moi
later than next autumn.