The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-11-21
mAx1ms OF MAX. o,RELL.
Some More Bright and Bitter Sayings of tho
Brilliant FrenchmNn.

Some Moro Bright and Bitter Sayings of tho
Brilliant FrenchmNn.
Les Flies of John Bull
An umbrella is the inseparable companion of
every well born Englishman.
Conversations is so called because at cne
you converse very little and you walk great
Every English servant girl who is twenty
years old, and not hump backed, has her young
man.
John Bull is past master in the art of bore
dom; but he has never invented any bore equal
to a conversations.
The Englishman who shows his feelings loses
his self-control. That is bad form, and his
countrymen will not have anything to do with
him.
If you make a call IN London during the
months of May and June the lady OF the house
win always ask, Have you been to the Royal
Academy"
An Englishman who would not for anything
say My God," will make no scruples about
''HIon Dieu,T or ''Mein Colt" as though God only
understood English
English women are much more easily shocked
by words than by things. To speak Of panta-
looms is objectionable; but it is quite proper to
appear at Lilly Bridge or Lords almost without
any.
You do not see in Hyde Park young men being
driven round and round for hours together
Though it would be too much to say that all men
in England work, all occupy themselves
his own house at two shillngs apiece, and he will
tell you it is too dear Demand guinea with
an arrogant air, and he will agree in an even re-
spectful manner
A Puritan will always ask you whether you
are pretty well pronounced 'poutti ouelF) he
will never push presumptions far as to think
that in this world of SORROWS you are quite
well.
Englishmen of the low church persuasion and
the nonconforming seets always make their
PRAYERS whilst looking into their hats.
n. B.-This is an evident reference to the Gus
tom of praising ones makers name on entering
a church
There is evidently drop in the value of
wives in England. During the present year
there have been two cases of sale. In one
case sixpence was realized; in the other pint
of beer
From the cradle to the tomb Frenehwomen
lead Frenchmen by the nose.
The best way to guarantee yourself against
burglars in London is to have pretty cook.
The police will keep your house in view
Lies policemen CONNIE les gendarmes. Sc
resembles tous. s-Recollections of II. ORell after
he had engaged pretty cook.
The following is the style of living of the aris.
tocracy: Before rising, ladies take tea and
| bread and butter; young men, brandy and
settler. Breakfast at 1o-four hot courses, all
kinds of cold meat fruit cakes, tea coffee,
chocolate, wine. Maximum duration OF
breakfast two hours. Luncheon at 2
meat and poultry, cold and hot; pud-
dings, cakes, dessert, cheese, ices.
| At 5 o'clock, tea, mullins and other cakes. Din
ner at s. Its menu, fortunately, not given.
After dinner the ladies go to the drawing room
to drink coffee. smoke and play cards; the men,
with whisky, eognac, Bordeaux, mineral water,
lemons and cigars, support existence until or
in the morning The English aristocracy are
boa constructors
The writer of the newly-published work OF
England records that he went, from motives OF
curiosity, to a meeting of the Blue Ribbon army,
On his return he hailed a cab, when the follow
ing conversation took places
you've been to see the Blue Ribbon water
drinking men, sir2 I'm member of the Yaller
| Ribbon harmy myself"
"And what, then, is this army Of the Yellow
| Ribbonslp
'FYou eats what you likes you drinks what
| you likes, and you don't care for nobody"
The writer gave that cabman good pourboire.