Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1884-11-20
THE BOY AND THE WIDOW.
From.the American.

A boy of seventeen writes as fol-
lows for advice
Wen Here It comes again I'm a Boy of II
come TO you for advice knowing that you are
clever to Boys Because read your paper. Now
the fact of the Business is rite Here | am Des
perately in love with widow She has 4 chill.
dren. My folks are against 1t teeth 4 tonail
Nam Sais if want 10 90 10 Hades BY lightning
Express TO 20 ahead q Marry that woman. But
l was thinking that knew my own Bus Now
any advice that you may give win Be gladly Re
ceiyed. But give it tome rite away quick.
Yours with respect. ~
There is nothing on earth that is
handsomer or sweeter than
widow, unless it is the same
widow when she is girl,
but we would not advise a boy of
seventeen to marry a widow with
four children. The chances are that
instead of the little husband taking
the place of father to the four chill
dren, the widow would have Eve
children on her hands, and it would
not be strange, if things did not go
right, TO see her take the seventeen
year old husband across her knee and
warm him so that he would think the
advice of his mother was we'll given
and that Hades business had come to
pass. No doubt this boy thinks the
widow is pretty nice, and no doubt she
is, in her place, out it is best for
her to take somebody of her size and
age, unless she wishes to run a kinder
garten, with husband for one of the
scholars. A boy that can't spell or
write any better than you can, you
young smart alick of kid, had bet
ter not tackle a widow with four chill
dren. In few years all you would
have would be experience If you
lived, which you probably wouldn't,
in ten years you would be Just about
ripe enough to pick, while she would
be getting grey and would pass readi-
ly for your mother; and you would
see some girl of your own age that
you would like better, and then the
widow would maui the life out of
you.
The children that you would be a
brevct father to would be your play
mates at first, then they would get big
enough to whip you, and you would
wish you and the widow were both
dead If the widow seriously enter
tains matrimonial intentions towards
you, there is something wrong about
her. Her head is wrong. If she is
pretty and accomplished. as she ought
to be, she does not have to marry any
seventeen year-old kids, as there are
grown persons, with all their faculties
about them, who are looking for lust
such widows to marry. Very likely
the widow is giving you sassafras.
She may like to have you bothering
around, and may occasionally allow
you to kiss her because you are young
ana innocent, and don't know how to
kiss old-fashioned, like a grown
person. She probably looks upon
you as plaything, and pets you, and
makes you feel real cunning, differ
ent from what you ever felt before,
and when you 90 away from her,
feeling that you love her better than
all the world, and would be wiling
to give up home, parents, everybody
to be Rugged by her, all the time she
is laughing at you, and calling you a
little fool. She very likely allows
you to think she loves you, just to
keep you in practice, SO when a man
comes along, and begins to shy full
grown smiles at her. and look at her
the way boy don't know how. she
Will know how to act.
A widow knows what she is about
pretty well, and she knows a calf
from a grown man better than you
do, You had better put your mead
under pump and hire somebody to
pump water on your hair, and down
your neck, then go to school and
learn how to spell simple words, and
behave yourself until it is time for
you TO think of marrying, and then
depend on the friendship of your
parents. la the meantime the widow
will get married and you will find a
girl that will love you so your teeth
will ache.