Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1884-08-16

Biglet Ielegraphs the National
4 Democratic Committee for Inter-
prets tion Of the the Tariff Plank.
CoNFEpRIT X ROADS,
(Wich is in the State NV Kentucky, !
Jooly 80, 1888.
Their are beins in this world wich
are constantly maxim tronble, and that
feend, Joe Bigter, is one NV EN-, and
the cheef.
We he'd called another meetin for
the purpos NV ratitin the nominashens,
which we he'd dooly announst by a
notiss written py 1ssaker Gavitt, and
posted up in Bascom's har-room to
make shoor that all the Dimocrats NV
1.-The Corners wood see it. l sot by it
for day and red it to EN-, to enshoor
full attendance.
Joe Bigler happened in and red it,
and sed it wuz a good ijee to hey a
ratification meetn. He shoodent his
self probably vote fur Cleveland and
Hendrix, but it wuz the proper racket
TO hev sich meetins to discuss the plat.
forms and sich, to the end NV citizens
votin intellegently, and he shoe swell
the meetin by bein present hisself.
Then | knowed ther wood be trouble
and | wood hev postponed the meetin
till some time when he wuz shoor to
be away, eff | Good. But unforchinitly
cooden't.
Then | begged him not to cum, but
he insisted, he wood. He felt it to be a
relijus dooty.
"Relijus dootym remarkd sarkas-
tically, "what is your reljun?"
Il hern't got much," sighed Josef
pensivly. swat | hev is mostly sum
med up in this: labor vigrusly every
day with myself not TO be quite as
mean ez / know how to be. | shel be
there"
The mite cum, the horn wuZ teatid
and Deekin Program, Issaker Gavitt
and myself took one sustainer to help
us thro' the hour and half we shood
be in,the meetin and deprived us sus-
tenasce, and then went over TO the
meetiI ;house.
1t was a cheerful site. Mirandy Pro-
gram assisted by the other Demekratic
ladies NV the Corners, he'd got out
the flags and banners we hev Voosed
ever senoe 1851, and he'd festoeped the
walls with ON. Ther wuz the good
old banners under wich we marched to
defeat under Seymore and Mcclellan,
and Greedy, and Tilden and Hancock,
with the same inscribshcns on EN-.
Death to Abolishnistsl |" "Shel white
Wimmin be Compelled to Merry Mig.
gers" white husbands or None!
"Shel the Nigger, wich is "A Beest,
Chetaminltc the Poles Beside the
White Man9" Them Wick Vote ez
Linkin Volia are ez bad ez the Gorller
Hisse,f!' andvarious other mettoes NV
like nacher.
And on the wall IN the place Nv
honor wuz the identikle rifle with wich
that old saint, Deelpin Pograa,, bush.
whackcd Fedrel piklits al niSe, after
: he he'd bin sellin EN- watermclons all
day. The Corners prize that rifle, and
it is alluz dekorated when we hey
Dimocratic mectins.
One advantage NV bein Dimokrat
at the Corners is we don't change at
all. The banners we marched undeI
in 1861 do jist as well for us now, for
we are constantly titln the. old tite
over agin, and alluz will till deth do
us part.
/ assoomed the chair and 1ssaker
Gavitt took the Secretarys table, ex
otlisho, and | made the speech ez
yoosual.
commenst an elaborate discushun
uy the platform NV the party, and wuz
gittin on very well till come to the
tariff plank, when Joe Bigler riz and
interrupted me. | knew the cuss wood
do it, and my heart went down into
my boots.
IL beg pardon" sed Josef, for
interruplin the elokent speeker and
woodent do it, only desire 10 assist
him in eloosidatin the eggsact meenin
NV The platform, over which | under
stand ther hez bin sum trouble. Ell
ther is anything on earth which shood
be clear and we'll defined, so clear that
he who runs may read, it is the plat.
form NV CRATE party. 1t shood be so
cleer that the humble intelleck shood
know eggacklg wat is ment by 1t, and
wat them wich stand on it propose to
do about il.
ITO ,he end wv hayin n plane and
clear inlcrpreiasbun NV this tariff
) plank, it okkurred to me when wuz
over to Seceshunville. to go TO the
highest authority on the subjick, wich
| Is I. iDC Shaiih"h w WV
Nashncl Dimekratic Community. Ell
any body on earth ought to know wat
the platform means it is Barnum,
isn't i,y"
The meetin all yelled "yes' when
Josef Went on,
Il may ez well menshun that !
assoomed the name uy our esteemed
friend lssaker Gayiit and telegraphed
thus:
"'To VIM H. Barnum. Nheerman NV the
Nashnel Dimoeratic Committy:
"'Duz the Dimocratic platform mecn per-
teckshun OF free tradey
- lssAKER GAvITT, Manyoofakterer.'
"Thc anser | reserved wuz entirely
satisfaktry. 1t red thus:
"'To Issaker Gavitt, Manyooiacterer:
- The tariff plank In the Dimocratic plat
form meens tariff reform with tendency to
the pertcckshiou nv Amcrikiu labor by i'm