The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1884-05-20
Sense and eMnpgense,

be beaten TO be cleaned
A Deadwood mob recently Iynched q
man because he said the town Was un-
cultured
People seldom improve when they
have no other model but themselves to
c,py after.
An Irish lover remarked: "Il's q very
great pleasure TO be alone, especially
when your sweetheart Is wid ye."
Sense shines with double lusteI
when it is set in humility, An able and
vet humble man is q jewefworth q king
dom.
A medical writer says that girls are sc
constructed that they cannot jump. Jus
make one of them an offer of marriage
and see.
Inquisitive people are the funnels o
conversation they do not take 10 any.
thing for th.ir own use, but merely tt
pass it to another.
A band of Italians brigands captured
duke resently and held him for thirty
days. Any American heiress can de
that, and hold him longer.
A lady and gentleman accidentally
touched each others feet under the "a
BILE. "occ,et telegraphy," said he. "Com
munion of soles," said she.
A Baltimore man killed himself be
cause bis vile would not support him
II beats thunder how lazy some womer
are getting to be nowadays.
Doctors say that people would b,
healthier ii they ate more onions. Tn.
doubtedly they would. 1t would keeE
them from going out nights.
Students in our colleges have now laic
aside their text books and are confiuine
taeir attention to the serious work of the
Year--Dase ball and boating.
Wild mint scattered about the house
will rid it Of rats or mice. The husband
will now have an excuse when his wife
detects the ordor OF the festive herb.
Any little article that disappears be.
tween now and the miidle OF the month
will be accounted for by Bridget as hav.
ing been "lost the day we moved, marm'
Some one interrogated little George
in regard to his sisters betrotbed. "How
old is heS' IL don't knowH" Is be
young ?" "Yes-he has no hair yet. y
1t is said to be fact that there Is no,
an Irish Catholic saloon-keeper in the
City of St. Paul, all of them being in.
6uenced by The church to quit the bust.
ness.
A Newman man 10 trying to out-talk
bis mother. .in.law. At last accounts the
young man had talked his head off, and
his let ear was still working up and
down.
"No, love-" he said, 81 cannot afford
to take you ou: Ilding, but I'll do the
next best thing. Come down to the
store any dav and I'll let you see me
shoot lat"
"What will the coming woman wear ?"
asks fashion magazine. II she's any,
thing like the present woman, and yon
take her word for it, she will have sab
nothing to wear"
Cslino, who had a very obstinate cold,
vent to consult his physician "Was
not your father consumptive ?" Calino,
with reassuling gesture: "No, mon
'ieur; lie was a photographer"
"How do you extract the cube root ?"
asked the school teacher of the son of q
dentist who had been assisting bis father
Extract the cube rootf Just trot out
your cubic tooth, and I'll extract the
'oot in three shakes OF sleeps tail :"
Mr.. Childs, OF the Philadelphia Led
ger, says be will leave his paper at his
ieath to the son OF A. j. Drexel. "When
was Young" be says. "Mr. Drexel
came forward and offered to put money
nto my paper and not to interfere IN
my way with H."
The young men connected with q
,hurch at Haverhill are to have sup
Der and sale of fancy articles. snd they
are to do the cooking, table
erving. aud make all things offered for
ale. Look out for death notices of
hose uhO attend
The site OF the historic Black Hole of
Calcutta, which was discovered several
months ago and excavated, has been
illed up and decently paved over. A
handsome tablet Of white marble, bear-
ng a suitable inscription, is about to ba
placed near the spot
Advices from Western Texas are to
he effect that cattle are suffering and
arge numbers are dying for want of
water aud grass, the drought having heen
Tery severe in that section. Myriads Of
have also appeared, and are
destroying all kinds Of vegetation.
A druggists trade paper states that
ome of the "butter color" sold to the
afners contains annatto, tumeriG, safs
ron, caustic potash, borax and alcohol.
md vet the farmers complain about pola
'onnus oleomargarine. And then they
20 right out and buy the cleo to mix
With their butter.
"1sam choost as full ash bag of
iour," remarked an inehriate to d sober
riehd "There is a difference between
'ou and sack OF -four. however" !"
'Whas ish difference ?" "When a sack
8 full Il can stand up, but when you are
ull you can't even lie down ON The
,rouni without holding on"
A scientific physician says: "In the
morning there Is an acrid state Of the
'ecretions, and nothing is SO we'll calcu-
ated to correct it as peaches, apples,
,tc The small seed fruits. such as figs.
raspberries and strswber-
les, may be clsssed among the best
ruits and medicines. Tte sugar in them
8 nutritious, the acid purifying and the
seeds laxative. We should look more
o our gardens for our medicines and
ess to our drug stores"
The list OF visitors registered at the
house where Jesse James was murdered
by Bob Ford includes the names of
statesmen, actors. editors, artists, capi1
talists, professors, and divines. Among
them are those of Jay Gould, Talmage,
Emma Abbott. FANNY Davenport, John
Nc Cullough, Fred Ward, Col. Barleigh,
Rev. John Miller, the agonistic tragediau,
Anna Dickinson, Robson and Crane,