davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
Why the Women Of the Corners De.
mand Prohibition.

Mrs. Bascom, the saloon keepers
wife, paraded herself before the
wives of her husbands patrons Sin
fggered silk dress, with hat with
ostridge feathers on it, and a seal
skin sack, and shoes with heels, and
red silk stockings. 1t is on
necessary to say what effect it had
onto the other wimmin ON the cor
ners."
Then these wimmin started a
croosade, which Pollack and Joe
Bigler jined in, and the result wuz
q meetin' Nv citizens, which embraced
q half dozen men and every woman
in the corners (ceptin Mrs. Bascom).
Joe Bigler made inflamatory speech
to those women shown that ef
their husbands would let hkker
alone they could have silk dresses,
and red stockings, ez well ez Mrs.
Bascom, that Mr.. Bascom wuz alb
sorbin' all the money in the corners,
and that so long ez he persisted in
takin' the money Nv their. husbands
for sod-eorn whiskey, so long wood
they hev to dress in caliker and &c
without stockings, and they might
consider themselves lucky ef the,
corralled enuf' to git them shoes
And they introdoost resolooshen'
demandin' the prohibishun Nv tn
sale of likker at the corners.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
Pointers 10 Politicians.

We hear that some of our Mexico
are going to take the stump
in the county and in order that they
need make no bad breaks, and let the
farmers find out how little they really
know about what happens in the
we give the. following point
ers:
Turnips, carrots, parsnips, beets
and potatoes are pulled out of the
ground.
Apples, pears, peaches, plums and
apricots grow on trees.
Oranges grow on the railroad train.
Bananas grow on fruit-stands.
Never speak of swarm of cows, a
herd of bees, or focks of pigs
Rye comes from the distillery.
The cotton-gin is an inferior kind
of liquor used by negroes on cot
ton plantation
A thrashing- machine is q school
teacher.
Sheep are sheared in midsummer.
the sheep first berg given Turkish
bath at the hands Of the Turk EN-
ployed on the farm. In shearing the
wool, cut from you. as you would in
cutting the coupons off Your bonds.
Orchids are round metallic objects
that the chore-boy uses when he
wants to play quoits.
Ensilage is sort of salve used
principally to suppress letter III ii
setting hen.
Hayseed is found in the farmers
hair.
Apples are gathered in the Autumn
by the neighbors' boys.
The yellow-jacket is small infe-
rior kind of yellow-jack.
Peaches are dried in Il Turkish
| towel.
Sour-milk for pancakes is given
by the COW that is fed on sour ap,
plies.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
An End To Rome SCREAMING.

Edward Shepherd, Of Harrisburg,
H., says: "Having received so much
benefit from Electric Bitters. l feel 1t
my duty to let suffering humanity
know it. Have had running sore
on my leg for eight years; my doe
tors told me l would have to have the
bone scraped or leg amputated: !
used, instead, three bottles OF Elec'
trio Bitters and seven boxes Buck.
lens Arnica Salve at 25c per box by
J. F. Llewellyn. 2Iw
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16

r. F. Roden buys and sells for
cash, and in tins way saves money
for his Customers. 4-H
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
THE VASSAR OF THE WEST"
HARDIN COLLEGE, MEXICO, MO.
Mrs. Fl. I. BAIRD, Ex-GOY. c. Fl. HARDIN,
President. Pres. Board Directors
Devoted to the Education OF
Young Ladies aad lEissss


The hea.thftllness of location. the splendid
buildings, well situated and nicely furnished
the ample grounds for exercise and recreation,
beautifully adorned with forest trees. flowers
and Shrubbery, the mOdel home department, the
thorough and extensive course OF instruction,
the able and experienced faculty, each one a
specialist, the new and elaborate philosophical
and chemical apparatus, the splendid library
and varied collection of globes, maps, charts,
and other invaluable aids TO study, the unparal-
leled health record, together with the elevated
moral tone and refined social influences are the
features that commend HARDIN COLLEGE to
such parents as are desrOuS of the thorough and
finished education of their daughters. No boys.
of any age, admitted. Character and class of
school considered, guaranteed the cheapest in
the West. Eighty boarding pupils and a large
local patronage last session attest the popularity
of Hardin College both abroad and at home. In
the Music and Art Departments 26O names were
enrolled. No other female college makes such
an exhibit, and this number indicates the high
est character OF instruction.
Address, for eleventh annual catalogue,
III. I. BAIRD Business Manager.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
MEXICO, MISSOURI THURSDAY, OCTOBER 16, 1884.
man standing out in front Of the mill,

man standing out in front OF the mill,
and then you play cards with him
while the men inside are grinding it
up for you. At least that's the way
they did when I was girl. l used
to hear pa Say"
"Dod-gast your measly pa!'' bawled
Mr.. Spoopendyke, with out intending
the least disrespect for his father-in-
law. '.I did not ask ye for the way
they did things in the Silurian period!
'Spose am polking around in this
subject with q view to finding out
how old Rameses worked his grain
rackets? Do you know what kind OF
mills they have now? Did ye ever
hear of anything that went by steam
except that dod-gasted jaw of yours!"
"Well, replied Mrs. Spoopendyke,
rather at loss as to which question
was entitled to an answer first, 81
suppose they can apply steam to
most anything, and 1 don't see why
they can't have steam wind mills. In
fact" continued Mrs. Spoopendyke,
who never took the harness off the
ory until it had done a fair days
work s'in fact, Ishould not be in the
least surprised to hear that they had
been having steam prize fight mill
some day? Though, if they should
try to apply steam to the meal tickets
at the hotels, it would be sure to re-
suit in some accident to poor people
who blow out the gas. Don't you
think so?"
Mr.. Spoopendyke slowly pulled
off his clothes and fired himself into
bed like q torpedo.
II don't care" continued Mrs.
Spoopendyke, in soliloquy. II don't
care. I may not know as much
about prize fights as some, but I dc
know that miller don't wear q white
hat to keep his head warm, because
he wears it all summer" and with
this arbitrary disposition Of time
honored theory, Mrs. Spoopendykt
gently pulled the shams out from
under her husbands head, and pu
his sock between the window blinds
80 they wouldn't rattle if the vino
blew.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
The Champion Cyclone Story.

During a tornado in Richland,
XIV, farmers wife was in the sum
mer kitchen preparing supper, and
her daughter was in the dining room
setting the table. As the wind
struck the house the currents divid-
ed. One carried the kitchen two
miles to an adjoining county, and
the other deposited the main part OF
the house half a mile in the opposite
direction. BY q strange freak OF ma
turesboth houses were picked up By
the retsualing current and set bael
directly ii thefr former places al
s.eatly a. if the Sork had been dom
by hand. The women We're so bus
lify enprussed in their work that the.
did not take notice that anything
unusual had happened un6i thei
attantion, was called to . crack L
the roof. l~@
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
at the tip and you may remedy it. If

at the tip and you may remedy it. If
that doesn't help the matter, take
that ifty-eent pair of gas-pinchers
and let's remove the burner. They
are made in two pieces. Catch hold
below the swell IL you want 70 re-
move one entirely from the fixtures.
What! Turning to the left! That's
the way to turn off a nut or remove
q screw, but ninety per cent. of the
gas fixtures are made with the thread
cut the other way. Turn to the right
to take off the burner The upper
half can be screwed off with your
fingers. and now you see what regu-
lates the flow of gas. 1t is little
cap screwlng down over three slots or
Sits. You can lower the cap until
no gas at all can come through, or
you can raise it until your burner,
when lighted, will blow like e steam
boat. If the gas is Of poor quality
these slots fill up. Place the burner
to your mouth and You can blow it
clear. Four or five minutes is time
enough for the job, but if you sent
for the plumber he would charge you
more than the plnchers cost.
Now let's see what we can do with
eight cents worth of plaster of paris.
Get an old bowl to mix it in, and be
careful to mix only what you want at
the time, as it hardens very rapidly.
Here are three or four holes in the
white wall where nails have been
driven or pulled out. Every jar is
shaking out little fine plaster on the
carpet. We can fill them in 10 time
with this preparation, and it dries
hard and smooth. The marble slab
on the back of the washstand is loose.
Scrape it with knife to clear away
any old plaster, and coat the edge
with new. Hold the slab firmly down
with one hand and strengthen your
work by filling the crevice between
the two pieces on the back side. Five
minutes time and two cents worth
of material will make job as solid
as rock. This same plaster of paris
can be used to cement broken flower
pots, fill nail holes overlooked by the
painter, joints about the mantle,
cracks in marble or stone hearths,
and if the plaster has cracked any
where along the baseboards you can
fill the places and make neat job OF
! it,-M, Quad.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
Beecher and His Cow.

II can remember" SAID Henry
Ward Beecher, "when I received an
old COW in payment of a bad debt.
1t was a very bad debt. and I came
to consider it bad payment. She
was thin COW, but the former owner
said she was better than she looked,
being q cross between a Jersey and
the Durham. She looked as if she
might have been a cross between an
old hair trunk and an abandoned
hoopskirt. kept the brute three
days, and no one, except perhaps
Lieutenant Atwell, could ever appre-
ciate the suffering I endured in that
time. The first night she broke
through the fence and reduced to a
pulp all the underclothing belonging
to my next door neighbor. She put
her horns through my bath tub and
ate up all my geraniums. She was
to give three gallons of milk day.
but she seemed short just then, and
never had that to spare while we kept
her. The second day she walked into
the kitchen, upset pan of butter
and a tub of lard. Then she fell
down a well, and when 1 got her out,
at cost of S., she took the collie,
whooping-cough or something and
kept us awake all night. Not green
thing was left in my garden; my
neighbor's peach trees and the rope
on which his underwear grew were as
bare of fruit as singletree, and ht
did not have twig of shrubbery left
My neighbor came over to see me
and said:
".Now 1 don't desire any quarrel
but want you to keep your COW on
of my shrubbery."
"'And / want you, my friend,
said I, 'to keep your shrubbery ou
of my cow
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16

The smallest voter in Wisconsin i
.'Gen. Samsiei Draper Of Lancaster,
who weighs just fifty pounds He
is a strong Democrat, and boasts
that his vote will count just as many
as that Of the Illinois Jumho, Hon.
David Davis.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
EVERY THURSDAY

z. L. WHITE, Editor and Proprietor.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16

"Make your husbands comfortable
at home, and they will not go out N
the evening"" cxeiainie'i a Cincinnati
preacher lately. Tie next day Gin
cinnati wives were anxionsiy inquiring
about the price of beer by the keg.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1884-10-16
Suppose.

Suppose newspaper man. every
time he hears of man who has
severely criticised HIM or his paper
in public, should retaliate hy holding
up to public gaze the faults and
shortcomings Of said critieiser. what
would be the result. Why the crit
iciser would think he had been terri
bly, outraged and would thirst for
the editors gore. Then the pooi
quill driver would get shot or shoot
somebody. That patient beast Of
burden, the country journalist, nes'er
does this unless under great pfnva
cation. 1t is't because he il affai,l
to do it. but because he isn't me,an
enough. He allows men TO e"
around trying to destroy his h'tsa
ness He hears his paper called a
worthless sheet because The editnr III
doing his duty has stepped on soiue
body toe:
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
Wants a Wife.

The Commissioners of Emigration at
New York received letter from
young German farmer at Spirit Lake,
Ia, few days since begging them to
help him find wife. The writer says
he was born in Neutrality-suspicious.,
and has been two years in Iowa, where
he purchased and cultivates four
horsepower farm. 1t is almost har-
vest tlme he writes, and the hard out
door work, prevents him from attend
ing to his housekeeping. He would like
a nice young girl from his native place
who would be willing to be his help
mate and the queen of his heart. He
does not stipulatc the style of girl. ieav-
ing that to the good taste and judge
mcnt of the Commissioners. All he
wants is nice young girl sent on with
the greatest dispatch. The Commits
sioners put the letter in the hands of
an attache of the Garden to fill the
commission.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
Meissonier's Models.

Meissonier's models receive princcly
wages. though they earn their money
hardly enough. They are liable to six
hours At stretch, almost without n
change of position, and in attitudes
which often are the reverse of comfort
able. The Quarrcl' contains five fig
ures, each Of which is n marvel of ana
tomical draughtmanship. Mcissonier
took seventeen sketches of 1t before he
put brush to canvas. Fancy dispute
in which the would-bc combatants try
to get at each other. while two friends
on one side and one on the other en-
dcavor to separate them. And the five
models stood in this attitude for three
how each day for sixty consecutive days.
They were better on still than the fell
low who slammed death beneath n real
dead horse on winters day when the
snow lay foot deep in my garden
said NJ. Mcissonier. No doubt they
were.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
How Mrs, O'Harris Turned:

Detroit Free Press.
The other night laboring man
named O'Harris was drinking beer and
playing cards in a Grand River avenue
saloon, when somebody asked him
what sort of wife he had.
1.-The humblest. .docilest little woman
in all this world" he replied.
doesn't she ever say anything about
your spending half your wages away
from home?"
Never n word
"And has she no objections to your
spending half your wages in beer and
cards?"
..If she has she doesn't state EN-
But won't she turn on you some
day? You know that even a worm
will turn?"
Faith and she will that I've been
going on in this way for the last four
teen years, and for the last two I've
been looking for climax. Awife suf-
fers about so long and then she turns
on YOU"
Not more than five minutes had
passed. and the men We're very busy
with their cards, when woman
opened the door and slipped in. She
stood for moment to get the range,
anu thttl uiaue Il Det-Ilnc lot lnc laDDE-
.r. OF went his hat, the hair flew in
showers, and over went the table with
its glasses and cards. Five or six bad
" frightened men rushed out doors in
body, the last one helped along by a
push from chair, and as the laborer
took the middle of the street and gath
cred himself together for some tall run
ming he cried out with Il lump in his
throat:
''It's my wife. and she's turned at
last. I'd like to see the worm which
would upset seven men and n saloon in
the elegant manner just witnessed in
side"
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
Vital Questions

Ask the most eminent physician
OF any school. what is the best thing
in the world for quieting and allaying
all irritation of the nerves. and curing
all forms of nervous complaints, giving
natural, childlike refreshing sleep al
ways?
And they will telly IL unhestatingly
"1Some form Of Hol,s!!''
CHAPTER I.
Ask any or all of the most eminent
physicians:
What is the best and only remedy
that can be relied on to cure all dis
eases of the kidneys and urinary or
gans; such as Bright's disease, diabetes,
retention, or inability to retain urine,
and all the diseases and ailments pecu-
liar to Women
And they will tell you explicitly and
emphatically "Buchu!!r'
Ask the same physicians
What is the most reliable and surest
cure for all liver diseases or dyspepsia;
constipation, indigestion, biliousness,
malaria, fever, ague &c." and they
will tell you:
Mandrake! or Ddndelioa!!!r'
Hence, when these remedies are combined
with others equally valuable,
Anu Compounded into hop bllters, sutI q
wonderful and mysterious curative power is
developed, which is so varied in its operations
that no disease or III health can possibly exist
or resist its power, and yet it is
Harmless for the most frail woman, weakest
invalid or smallest child to use.
CHAPTER II.
''Patients
almost dead or nearly dying
For years, and given up by physi-
clans. of Bright's and other kidney dis
eases, liver complaints, severe coughs,
called consumption, have been cured
Women gone nearly crazy!.!H
From agony of neuralgia, nervous
ness, wakefulness, and various diseases
peculiar to women.
People drawn out ofshape from excrucating
pangs of rheumatism, inflammatory and
chronic, or suffering from scrofula.
Erysipelas!
.Saltrheum, blood poisoning, dyspepsia, in
digestion, and, in fact, almost all diseases
frail''
Nature is heir to
Have been cured by Hop Bitters, proof Of
which can be found in every neighborhooi in
the known world.
None genuine without bunch Of green
Hops on the white label. Shun all the vile,
poisonous stuff with Hop" or "Hops" in
heir name.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
A Goat With Some GumptiOn.

San Diego Herald.
a citizen of this place has two goats,
and TO prevent their doing injury to the
gardens Of the neighbors, one is usual
" picketed out. the other never leav-
ing its mate. The other day one was
picketcd some distance from home, and
nj evening the loose goat came running
home tn the house, making n bleating
noise Of distress and scratching against
the gate, and after drawing attention
would run of in the direction where
the other one was picke,ed. This opcr-
alton was repeated three times. when
the owner concluded that something
was the matter. and started in the di-
rection indicated. Nothing could eS-
ceed the JOY of the goat. manifested by
jumping and frisking about, and i: led
the way 10 the spot where the other one
was. Here the pickcted animal was
found 10 be in n precarious position. 1t
had climbed tree stump. and the
picket rope had caugh, in a broken
limb. and the goats fore fee; were held
entirely of the ground. He was quick
" released. when the goat that gave
the alarm repeated its demonstrations
of JOY and showed its affections for
its mate by rubbing agains, it and lick
inr IL
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
STRUCK by FORTUNE.
One OF the Memphis Men who Drew fif-
teen Thousand Dollars.

One OF the Memphis Men who Drew Fif-
teen Thousand Dollars.
Stories of sudden or miraculous
wealth have always possessed pecul-
lar fascination for the masses. and the
man who has drawn n prize in lot
terry is regarded rs the happicst of
mortals. AT the last drawing Of The
Louisiana State Lottery two Memphis
men drew $3.50 each Ono of these
was Mr.. B. j. Dorsey, who has been
foreman Of hands at work upon the
lcvecs along the Mississippi. He has
been living in humble circumstances at
33 jackson street. An Avalanche re-
porter yesterday had curiosity to see the
man who had drawn the $4,000, so he
repaired to the corner of Main and
jackson streets and inquired of some
children where Dorsey lived.
"You mean the man that drew the
lottery prizepS asked one of them.
yes" replied the reporter.
"Hc's moved away. He used to live
in that little house over there, but he's
goin' 10 live in fine house in Fort
Pickering now."
The reporter greatly marveled and
went TO the house pointed out to him,
and asked man there IL Dorsey still
lived there.
NO" was the reply. "You see he
drew part of the big prize in the Louisi-
ana State Lottery, and he wants more
stylish quarters. He's got tho money
and guess he's happy. I wish was
in his place, that's all.
Mr., Dorsey is said to be man n
every way deserving the good luck that
has been thrust upon him by chance
Memphis Crcnn.) Avalanche, june 4.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16

About two years ago, prominent
citizen Of Chicago was told by his ply
sicinns that he must die. They said his
system was so dobilitatcd that there was
nothing left to build on. He made up
his mind TO try a ''new departure. He
got some of DR.. Picrce's Golden Medi-
cal Discovery" and took it according to
directions. He began TO improve at
once. He kept up the treatment for
some months, and is to-day awell man.
He says the Discovery" saved his
life.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16

Something that will quiet the nerves,
give strength to the body, induce re,
freshing sleep, improve the quality of
the blood, and purify and brighten the
complexion, is what many persons
would be very glad TO obtain. Garter 5
Iron Pills are made for exactly this
class of troubles, and are remarkably
successfulin accomplishing the ends de-
sired. as named above. They are use
full for both men and women. Sold by
druggists. Price, so cents a box. See
advertisement
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
BAKING POWDERS CONTAINING LIME.
Why Royal is Absolutely Pure.

Analysis shows the presence of Taate of Lime in several
brands of Baking Powder placed upon the market:
"PRICES" Baking Powder contains Tarate of Lime.
"PEARL" Baking Powder contains Tartrate of Lime
"GROFF's SNOWFLAKE" Baking Powder contains Tar
trae of Lime.
ode LANDS" Baking Powder contains Tartrae of Lime.
All BULK Baking Powders contain Tartrate of Lime.
The of this substance in the abovenamed Baking
Powders results from the of inferior Cream of Tartar in
their manufacture The Cream of Tartar of the market from
which they made contains Tarrate of Lime in amounts
varying from six and hence these powders
this mpurity foreign substance corresponding
extent which is of value, but positive derment in any
powder in which it is found.
The Royal Baking Powder is made from of
specially refined and prepared for its by patent
by which the of lime totally eliminated This highly
important result has been attained only with labor
and expense In money alone quarter of million dollars
has been invested in patents machinery and appliances by
which the crude of being procured direct from the
wine districts of Europe and subjected in this country to these
processes rendered entirely free only from the
Objectionable me other foreign substances
This adds greatly the of manufacturing Royal Baking
Powder all its other ingredients selected and
pared with the precise and regardless of labor and
expense an article produced entirely any
substance absolutely pure respects No
me ear alum mpurity of any kind by inadveence
by the of adueraed articles otherwise, be introduced
into Royal it ingredients except those
certified by the eminent chemists necessary make
pure wholesome, and perfect baking powder,
manufacture Royal Baking Powder than
any other but is shown by chemical analysis the only
absolutely pure" baking powder made.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16

When you visit or leave New York
City. via Central depot, save Baggage
Expressagc and 50 Carriage Hire, and
stop at tho Grand Union Hotel, oppo-
site said depot. Six hundred elegant
rooms fitted up Mt cost of one million
dollars; 81 and upwards per day.
European plan. Elevator. Restau-
rant supplied with the best. Horse
cars, stages and elevated railroad to
all depots. Families can live better
for less money at Grand Union Hotel
than at any other first-class hotel in
tho city.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16

"Why is this butter like SamsonP"
asked the spruce young man who tends
the ribbon counter, but the landlady
looked sternly at him. remarking:
You'd butter settle last weeks bill, !"
and the cream of the Joke wns lost.
Delta chief., 1884-07-16
Wrecked Manhood.

Victims Of youthful indiscretions suf-
fcring from nervous debility, lack of
sclf-coniidence, impaired memory. and
kindred symptoms, should send three
letter stamps for large illustrated trea-
tisc, giving means of certain cure, with
numerous testimonials. Address Worlds
Dispcnsary Medical Association, Buff
talo n Y