Omaha daily bee., 1884-12-10
A DAKOTA BLIZz ARD.
The Stories With Which Fargo Old
Timers Regalc Tenderfcet on
Their FIRST VISIT.

Fargo Correspondence st. Paul Day.
An eastern man with "culchah" aud
the fragment of fortune left over from a
dissipated patrimony, was at the Head
quarters hotel yesterday afternoon on his
way up the valley looking up llue Of
! land investments. He wanted to be in.
troduced TO some active Dak1tiau. The
boys steered him onto old Bill Jones and
friend who had Just come in from tax
inp a sun bath on the platform looking
for pilgrims on the incoming trains. They
sized up the wise man from the east, as
the clerk introduced them, for the old
blizzard story.
"The stranger opened the ball with:
"Awl | am glad to meet you. Must be
rather cold country out here, / snould
say" -,
"well, yes, purity burned cold here
now, and | reckon we'll get blizzard be-
fore long"
"a blizzard2 Awl What's biz
zardl'
"Whst. Didn't you never see a
blizz,rdl MOI Well, ] be burned,
Hank" turning to comrade, there's a
fellow as never saw blizzard" He con-
tinued: 81 have, though, an I'll tell ye
about it. A fellerll get up some morn.
ing and he'll think it fine day, The
sun will be shinin' and ten to one he'll
take q drive in the country, and that's
just what the cussed thing wants. Long
about noon It'll get little hazy around
the sun and purity soon the skyu git
kinder black around the edges, like a
feller's eye that got spoilt in sluggin'-
match, but it'll be all quiet, and the
wind'll go sneakin along as though it
was 'fraid o. scarin' somebody, an the sky
will get little darker round the edges,
8 if 1t was goin' to put on mournin'.
And you'll get a.scairt and wonder if it's
goin' to snow. An then the stinkin
wind will hold its breath till you git
away from any house or everybody gets
out of his hole, an then the darn thing'l
begin.
"Blowl It'll blow horse right out
of the harness and shake cutter over
the prairie at the rate of mile mint.
And then you've got to be mighty care
full to keep your hat on or it'll blow you
baldheaded In less'n no time. Beats a
Sioux Indian on the war-path for raisin'
hair. That's the reason there are so
many bald-hesded men in Dakota-that
an lyin' bout the country. An, by
gosh! it'll blow your clothes right off of
you, too. and then your deader than an
icicle. You have to strap 'em on. No
body goes cut doors In Dakota without
some straps in his pockets. Then you'll
think it is gettin' cold, but you wont
know how cold it is till you pull out yer
whisky bottle an find it frozen solid
specially If it's Dakota whisky. Beats
ali how little cold Dakota
liquor can stand. Then first thing
you know it'll begin snowin'.
Oh, the snow III come from every
where. Seems like the ground showed,
and you'll think you're in the middle of
a big whirlin' snow bank, an ten chances
to one you'll git all tangled up in the
darned stuff an go tloppin' off like
thunderin' big snowflake, and won't
know nothIn' till you drop down some.
where in Minnesota. An that's what
makes it SO dry in Dakota. 1t SHOWS
'nough there, but I'll be oussed If the
stuff ever touches ground until it gets to
Minnesota. If Man gets out of some of
them billiards. he'll have to carry his own
corpse out. Won't nothin' keep the snow
out 'cept buffaler skin, an it'll wear that
out in half an hour.
81 got caught in one of them an
thought / wuz dead man sure, but got
out out by the durndest luck you ever
see. / was big cuss then, weighed 25O
pounds but was awful scarf and felt
myself shrinking under that blasted
cold-you know cold contracts, as we
L. - ,,,fn I xuaun'f hJn-
germ gopher. Well, as l was gropin'
my way round on the prairie l put my
foot in a badger hole an mebbe you
won't believe me, but I'll be darned if |
didn't crawl right into that badger hole, L
was that shrunk, all but my boots an
they was too big and stuck on the outside
an kept the snow out. Well, | stayed
there till the wind quit. .howlin, and then
| crawled out and went home to jim
town, where | lived. They thought ]
was lost, an when tole 'em who was
they laughed at me, said L wuz'n impos-
ter an druv me out up the country, No
sir, don't want any more blizzards in
mine, becher life. I'd rather be in an
open claim shanty long.side the north
pole or ia h--with my back broke.
"Well, skuse me, stranger, +" concluded
the Dakotian, 81 must go; come Hank,
nudginc his partner, "old you see that
tenderfoot's eyes2 Thought they'd drop
into his mouth. Guess he'll never stay
in Dakota. Aw, that's blizzard. But
I'm gettin' dryer'n Dakota; lets irrigate.
And the western rustlers turned the cor
ner on bee line for the nearest place.
-a1--------
400 Doses One Dollar" is true only of