davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
The Canada Thistle.

A small patch of this somewhat ire
pressible plant appeared in the fruit
garden. thought to make an end of it
by the most vigorous treatment. The
ground was carefully dug over for some
distance beyond the outermost circle of
thistles, and every preceptible trace of
root, stem and branch taken away and
burned Then refuse straw to depth
of two feet was spread over the whole
area with view of smothering out any
chance fragments that might be left. In
three or four weeks, however, to my no
small astonishment, some sprouts had
pushed entirely through the straw, show
ing here and there clusters of fine vigor-
Gus leaves. My subsequent acquaintance
with the Canada thistle leads ne to con-
clude: l, that the plant shows a far
greater vigor of growth and tenacity of
life in light sandy soil than In one
which inclines to be heavy and cold; 2,
that patch established in garden of
lawn cannot be suppressed without keep
ing the whole area free of all vegetation
for at least two years; 3, that the use of
salt and similar substances is impracti-
cable, because if used in sufficient
quantities to kill the thistles it would
also kill all other vegetation and render
the soil for some time infertile; 4, that
good farmers as a rule do not greatly
dread this weed, at least in ordinary
fields, because if once established in pas
ture or meadow it may be exterminated
in two or three years by breaking up and
planting to some hoed crop, which, how
ever, must be fertilized in most
thorough manner; 5, that the law III
several States making it a misdemeanor
to allow the Canada thistle to go to seed
is an excellent one; but that Ihave yet
to learn of the first instance of its having
been enforced. Finally, 1t is possible
to say a good word even for the Canada
thistle. When well grown it is quite
attractive, and presents an air ofdefance
which is altogether unique; moreover,
when in bloom the flowers are very
pretty, and besides, they exhale sweet
perfume which is exceeded in delicacy
by those of few other plants.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
A Bride i'm a Tree.TOp.

Captain Mccoy, of the Aridd,ae, gives
particulars of the fearful experience of
bridal party in the storm opposite Rock
port. Ira Zenor went from Rockport to
be married to Miss Shryock, whose par
ents live opposite. J. G. Daugherty,
who of late years has been running the
ferry, took the groom and his friends,
accompanied with two-horse carriage,
across the river on his ferryboat in the
morning. Everything went we'll, the
ceremony was performed, and the day
passed pleasantly until about 8 p. M,
when the party, with some addition,
started to return. They consisted of
Mr.. Daugherty and his wife, Ira Zenor
and his bride, and ten other ladies and
gentlemen. After crossing an over
flowed field they reached a clump of
trees on the edge OF the river bank,
when the storm struck the frail boat,
overturning it. The party chung to the
trees and remained in the branches two
hours, when they We're rescued by
colored man in skiff. They remained
at the colored mans house until morn
ing, when they righted their ferryboat
and went to Rockport, thankful to be
alive. The weather was so cold the cloth
ing of the sufferers froze on them, and
it is wonderful that no lives were lost
Evansville (Ipd.) Journal.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
An Editors Introduction.

Judge Tourgee, in his Continent,
says: A. o. Bunnell, of the DanviIle
On. " Advertiser, is one of the
brightest and most humorous men in
the country, though only those who are
privileged to be counted among his best
friends ever learn the real fun that is
hidden behind his super-soIemn phiz.
The editor of the Continent, having re-
Gently strayed into one of the interior
towns of the State, on lecture tour,
found lying on the table in the room ap-
propriated to him at his hotel the follow
ing letter, which is worthy of place in
"Hood's Own" Dear Judge: This
will introduce you to my big brother,
Major M. J. Bunnell, who, if he does
not bring it himself, will certainly
follow soon afterward. He is hand
somer man than I am, but not near so
good. While [ am only man of words,
he is a man of deeds, as his title in
dicates, also the fact that he is County
Clerk. If he gets started Especially in
his army experiencesl you may find him
man of words, too; IN which case l
pity you.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
THE BELLS OF LYNN


When the eve is growing gray, and the tide is
rolling in,
1sit and look across the bay to the bonny town
of Lynn;
And the fisher folks are near,
But l wist they never hear
The songs the far bells make for me, the bonny
bells of Lynn
Tie folks are cha sting gay, and I hear their
merry din,
But look and look across the bay to the bonny
town of Lynn;
He told me to wait here
Upon the old brown pier,
To wait and watch him coming when the tide
was rolling in.
Oh, see him pulling strong pulling DER the
bay to me,
And hear his iovial song, and his merry face
I see;
And now he's at the pier.
My bonny love aud d;ar;
And he's coming mp the sea-washed steps with
hands oUtstretcAed to me.
Oh, my love, your cheek is cold, and your
hands are stark and thin
Oh, hear you not the bells of old, the bonny
bells of Lynn?
Oh, have you naugbt to say
Upon our wedding day?
Love, hear you not the wedding bells across
the Bay of Lynn?
Oh, my lover, speak to me aud hold me fast,
mine own
For fear this rising sea, and these winds and
waves that moan?
But never word he saidl
He is dead, my love is dead
All me ah me did but dream; and am all
alone
Alore and old, and gray; and the tide is rolling
a;
T < my hearts away, away, away, in the old
graveyard at Lynn
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
Test the Seed i'm Time.

There are ways by which the best
looking seeds may have become unreli-
able for planting, says Henry Ives,
hence the need of tests in time. Such
testing is SO easy and its benefits so OBJ
vious that after once practicing it the
farmer will find it not only pleasant
pastime but a real profit. Have box
of earth stand about the stove to warm
it and water it, and when in a suitable
condition for the seed-corn plant in rows,
and the kernels at equal distance apart
in the row, say an inch and a half,
counting the kernels and marking the
number distinctly at the end of the row.
Then when they grow it will be seen
what percentage Gf any fail.
Or if a number of samples of seed
corn are to be tested, larger box should
be used, so that growing side by side in
the same place the condition may be
alike for each. Then plant, say one row
to each kind, and say twenty kernels in
a row; then it will readily be seen which
of the kinds sampled are most worthy
to be retained for planting. In the
same way any kind of seeds may be tried
in advance, but in all cases count the
number used for the purpose, and plant
In different rows, and at given intervals
in the row, and mark at the end of the
row the number of seeds planted in it.
In the case of seed-corn there never
was season when such precaution was
more necessary 1t has been estimated
that more than nine-tenths of the farm
ers have not got from their last years
crop any that is suitable for seed. But
we read of sections where the crop was
better than an average. Now, I believe
it would be a great service to large
of farmers if some of those
who were so favored would advertise to
that effect, naming the kind, its distin-
gushing characteristics, about where it
was grown, and how it would be sold;
md if the result should be as it usually
las been, farmers who buy will derive |
benefit enough just from such changing |
# seed to more than pay them for the |
ost of getting it.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
A Monster Elephant.

A company has been formed with
a capital of $3.50, 900 for the purpose Of
building at Coney Island a monster
wooden elephant to be used as a hotel.
1t will be $50 feet i'll length, 122 feet in
heighth, and 169 feet in circumference,
and will stand upon a platform built
upon piling. The following figures will
give some idea of the size of the quad
ruped The neck will be 10 feet long
with a circumference of 108 feet; the
legs 40 feet in length with a circumfer-
ence of go feet; the ears, 81 feet long
and 20 feet wide, will weigh 1000
pounds; the trunk, 50 feet long, and
tapering from diameter of IA feet to 3
feet inches; and its tusks 80 feet and
six inches. The eyes of the monster
will be four feet in diameter. A tele-
scope will be placed in the center of each
eye through which the harbor and dis
tant headlands can be seen. The howdah
on the back of the elephant will be 80
feet square and 80 feet in height. The
elephant is to be built OF wood, tin and
iron.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
Butter and Cheese.

During the recent pleuro-pneumonia
debate in the United States House Mr..
Springer gave a terse exhibit of the
country's dairy interests, culled and COM
pressed from the last census returns. 1t
has a double interest now that the ques-
ton of spurious butter is again under
discussion
The butter product of the year 1879
was 1912, ,071 pounds in all. At 20
cents pound this was worth $161, 1884,
414. The cheese product was also of
some value. There were made on farms
and in factories 243, 157, $50 pounds of
cheese in 1879, which, at 10 cents a
pound, was worth $24, 315, 785. The
total value of these two products was
worth $165, $50, 199. We hear much of
tn e great iron interest Of the country.
The product Of all the iron-rolling mills
of the United States in 1879 was only
$136, 1913, 574, and the product of the iron
and steel mills was 1896, 557, ,6S5. The
material used in these. manufactures was
worth $191. .271, $50. Hence the iron and
steel works of the United States only
added to the wealth of the country in one
year $105, 1856, 535. But butter and
cheese added $185, 900, 900 in the same
year to the wealth of the country.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
A Drunkard'S Wife.


The Supreme Court of Iowa doesn't
take a sympathetic view of ''the drunk
ards poor wife," who so often figures
pathetically before the public and the
courts, Judging from the following re-
cent opinion rendered by that body:
"She chose a drunkard for husband,
and she ought to discharge the duties of
a drunkard's wife. She does not show
that her personal safety or even her
well-being requires her to leave him.
She doubtless would have lived more
comfortably in the society of sober
man, but she ought to have considered,
and doubtless did consider, the discom-
forts of a drunken husband when she
married the defendant. But, she urges,
he promised reformation before mar
riage. His failure to keep his promise
did not Justify her in deserting him. All
the world knows that such promises
made by drunken man are always
broken. In a few words. as she know
ingly married drunkard, she must be
content to be drunkard's wife"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
The Military Squabble.

The New York military and the vet
Grams are having little squabble among
themselves and bitter controversy has
arisen. Gen. Shaler explains matters as
follows: ''In the first place the officers
saw that these uniformed battalions were
drawing away men from the regiments
who otherwise would have remained
with them. In the active regiments, as
you know, there is q great deal of hard
work. Now none of us like hard work.
Of course there is a great deal of pleas
ant social intercourse, a great deal of
fun and much enjoyment; but there is
also great deal of work, and young
men seeing these organizations, where it
is all fun and no work, resolve as soon
as possible to join one Of them. BY do
ing so they see they can at once attain
to rank which they could not have Sc
cured for years in the active service, and
the officers wanted very naturally to put
a stop to this. Then again they OBJ
jected to the use of the uniform, as
making it too common. I know men
who served four years in the field durin g
the war and did not rise to rank higher
than captain, but here is young fell
low, if he is gifted with good address,
and has plenty of money and can tell a
good story, who can be colonel at
once, after five years of service in the
ranks. For in these uniformed battaI-
ions it is not the man that has served
the longest, or that Is possessed OF the
most military knowledge, that is elected
as colonel; but it is the one that can the
oftenest set up the champagne for the
boys, and it belittles a title which we
ought all to respect as mark of honor,
renders it valueless and of no account in
the public estimation. l think that if
this is properly set before the members
of the veteran organizations that they
will see its force. You go into hotel,
and it is, How are you, Major 2 How
are you, Colonel?' Come, General,
what will you take?' Ask one of these
military gentlemen, Are you colonel?
"Oh, yes
"'Of what regiment p
"'So-and-so Veterans
"'Have you commission p
"'No. I have no commission, but the
boys elected me colonel; I guess l was
a good fellow and able to set it up for
EN-
'Is it at all wonderful that men who
have won their honorable distinctions by
years of service to the country feel lit
tie sore when the whole value of them
is taken away; when man in the ranks
to-day can be a maior-general next
week ?"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
take vote on the train, and then some
thing awful happened, and here I am.

take vote on the train, and then some
thing awful happened, and here am.
HOW GERsTER VIEWS IT.
Reporter-"I suppose you heard
about that kissing afflir between Gov
ernor Crittenden and Patti ?"
Gerster-'tI heard that the Governor
kissed Patti before she had time to re-
sist, but don't see anything in that to
create so much talk"
Reporter-"You don't?"
Gerster- ''Certainly not. There is
nothing wrong in man kissing woman
old enough to be his mother"
WORD OF CAUTION.
"You want to watch out for alligators
very carefully at first was the advice
given Northern invalid on his arrival
in Florida, ''but after you have been
here few weeks it won't so much mat
ter"
"Why not? ?" was the question. "Why
should be more cautious at one time
than another?"
because" was the reply, "after You
have been here little while you will
have grown too thin to be an object of
interest to alligators. They only want
resh arri vals."
HOW HE FELT.
First Citizen-''Received your gas
bill for the winter yet?"
Second Citizen-"Yes; did you get
yours?''
First Citizen-''I did, and it made me
feel like committing suicide
Second Citizen-"Mine had no such
effect; I love life too we'll"
First Citizen-"Well, how did you
feel about it ?'
Second Citizen-'I merely felt like
taking off nv hatto a coal-oiI lamp"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

Even the looks of the children i'm
proved; their thin, wan cheeks became
full and rosy, while happiness sparkled
in the eyes of all.
As for the pastor, his step grew light
and springy, his every gesture full of
life, while his sermons became so strik-
ing in form and delivery that they i'm
pressed the whole community to such a
degree that the church rapidly filled,
every pew was rented, and very soon a
warm revival of religion made glad
many hearts, and caused all to say:
"Nevermore shall minister of this
church go into his pulpit on Sunday
with an empty pocket-book.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
Air-Oh, Pm a Daisy.

"George, dear, do you know that papa
doesn't like you very well ?"
"Oh yes" said George.
"And he has said that mustn't re-
ceive you any more at the house."
"Good for him." replied the young
man, heartily.
"And," continued the girl, with a
bIanched face, "I hear him now in the
woodshed untying the deg"
Eyes, hear him; but he is standing
terribly in the dogs light. Does he hate
the dog ?"
"No, George, dear, he hates you. But
what in the world will you do? You
will surely have an encounter with the
ferocious animal when you go OUT
George smiled superior smile and
said:
my dear, as you know, I am book
agent. My income is derived solely
from selling books. This afternoon /
sold an editor of daily paper an ency-
clopedia, a pronouncing dictionary, a
gazetteer of natural history and bound
volume of the New York Herald. 1t
took me ten minutes. shall spend five
minutes with the dog. "-Phdta. CaI.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

THERE IS GOOD OLD fairy story of a
girl who received from the good peo-
pie the marvellous property of dropping
pearls and diamonds from her lips when
ever she spoke. This fairy girl has
found rival in recent present to the
Pope of a fish, made of solid gold,
studded with rubies, which, whenever it
opens its mouth, pours coins of virgin
gold into the hands of its fortunate
owner, but unfortunately it has not the
gift of durability, and the Pope must be
sparing of his tests.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
The Copyright League.

General George B. Mcclellan, in Civ
ing his signature to the copyrightleague,
wrote the executive committee as fol-
lows: 81 sign the petition in regard to
copyright, understanding that it is
simply an effort to abolish the distinc-
ton between native and foreign authors
AS first step toward obtaining the
same privilege for our authors abroad.
l do not believe in the propriety of mix
ing this up with questions of tariff on
books, etc. in other words, think it
matter for authors and not for pub
fishers"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
QUAKER CITY HUMOR.
A BRACE OF GOOD THINGS FROM THE
PHILA, ''EVENING Gallo
A New Degree-A Rash YOutt-Ob tanning n
J0b-A True StOry-At the Theatre-It
Cut Both Ways-COIOr Blindness, etc.
CUTS BOTH WAYS,

Jones-"My gracious this is terri
ble."
Smith-"Mercy! what has happened ?"
JOnes--"There is movement to re-
taliate on Germany by a unanimous re-
fusal to drink another drop of imported
German wine"
Smith-"Well, what of it? How can
that affair affect you?"
Sones-'Affect me? It will ruin me.
I have 10000 empty wine bottles of
German make on hand and have taken
ninety-nine year lease on New Jersey
vinegar factory"
AT THE THEATRE.
Arabella-"Oh hear those horrid
boys yelling Down in front ? What
can be the matter ?"
Dude Augustus ''Weally can't see
what the mattah can be"
Arabella- -''There is no one standing
up"
Dude Augustus -''No, what can they
be referring TOP"
Arabella-"Ohl I guess they are just
poking fun
Dude Augustus" "Ah at what %
Arabella (glancing at the down on his
upper ip)-"At your mustache."
MORE COLOR BLINDNESS.
Superintendent Southern Railroad
eyes, there is vacancy on one of the
passenger trains; will you try it ?"
Applicant-"Oh gladly, sir
Superintendent Every we'll; but you
will have to be examined first. The
brakeman who held the position before
you had to be discharged for color
blindness" "
Applicant ''Color- blindness ?''
Superintendent" he allowed a
black man to get into the car reserved
for white passengers.
TRUE STORY.
"The Sheriff will be here tomorrow
and everything we have will be swept
away" and lie bowed his head in his
hands and groaned aloud.
The patient little wife went softly to
bureau drawer, and taking therefrom
$50, 900 which she had saved from her
household expenses, placed the package
quietly at his feet.
Half an hour later the mortgage was
paid off and the old man was around the
corner playing seven-up for beer.
NEW DEGREE.
Little Nell-"What does those letters
B. A. after your name mean ?''
Young Pilkins- ''They mean bachelor
of arts. got them at college,"
Little Nell-''That's what thought.
Wasn't it mean of them not to give you
the other letters ? Pa said he wondered
you didn't get them.''
Young Pilkins (delighted)-"You
mean the decree of NJ. A.
Little Nell-'No, those were not the
letters pa said.'
Young Pilkins-''Not =? Why, what
was it he said ?''
Little Nell-''He said he wondered
you didn't get the G. B.
HE OBTAINED THE JOB.
$50 you want position as clerk, do
you ?" asked the proprietor of the hotel
of dapper young applicant.
eyes, sir.
''Have you had much experience ?"
"Oh, yes, sir. 1 have been connected
with great many of the large hotels,
and can give the best of recommended
tions."
"Well," said the landlord, "we want
clerk, but" and he hesitated.
"But what p asked the young man.
'You seem to have no diamond
breast-pin."
eyes. l have. I've got big one, but
I thought I wouldn't wear it this morn
ing"
''In that case," said the hotel pro-
prietor, with relieved look, 'the posi-
ton is at your service. 1 thought at
first that you had diamond yet to pur-
chase, and the way business is going on
just now, it might cramp me some
what"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

THE PREsrpENoY.-Samu J. Tilden,
when asked by an interviewer If he
would accept the nomination for the
Presidency, said 81 should have to de-
cline. L am now unable to undergo the
exertions which, in case of my election,
L should have to make. L could not
stand the physical effort. My name
must not be considered"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

A MAN in Terre Haute, who recently
secured a divorce from his wife, now
employs her as his servant girl, and she
has more money and better clothes than
when she was his wife. If some men
would treat their wives as they do their
servant girls there would be fewer
divorces. .-Teras ,SVtiags.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

A YOUNG man who had been going
with Vermont girl for some time, and
had made her several presents, asked
her one day if she would accept puppy.
He was awful mad when she replied
that her mother had told her if he pro-
posed to her to say no.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

In RUssIA-Mr. Cassius NJ Clay, who
lived nine years in st. Petersburg, and
knew all classes, says that the Russians
are kind and humane people, that their
prisons are better than Kentucky pris-
ons, their hospitals models, their streets
hundred times cleaner than those of
Richmond, that the daughters of exiles
speak lovingly of their 'father. land, :"
and that of all the people he ever knew
the Russians are the most genial and
hospitable
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

In all the time that General Sherman
was in Washington he never kissed
Mary Walker. This proves the superb
ority of the bloomer costume. II she
had been impeded with skirts the Gen
eral would have caught her the first day.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

IT is now believed that Courtney is the
author of that beautiful elegiac poem be-
ginning: "Affliction's oar long time he
bore"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10

IT IS said that the peculiar sunsets are
caused by the sun trying to set by the
new standard time,