davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
A Turkish Declaration of War.

The following curious declaration of
war was issued in 1868, by Mahomet
Nv against Leopold, Emperor of Ger
many:
BY the grace of God, tie great God
in heaven, we Molo Mahomet, god of
the earth, renowned and powerful
Emperor of Babylon and Judea, from
the rising to the setting of the sun,
king of all earthly kings, mighty ruler
of Arabia and Mauritania. born tri-
umphant sovereign of Jerusalem,
possesser of the tomb of Christ the
crucifed, declare to thee, Emperor of
Germany, to thee King of Poland, and
to all the chiefs of thy la1d, as well
as to the Pope of Rome, his cardinals
and bishops, that we are resolved to
attack thee, With thirteen kings, 1, 800,
600 men on horseback and on foot
with Turkish courage unknown to
thee and thine. We will visit thee in
Vienna, thy capital, and pursue thee
and he King Of Poland, and all thy
allies, sword in hand, burning, plum
dering, numbering, and destroying thy
country and subjects. As for thee,
thou shalt suffer the most horrible
death that can be imagined. AS thy
government is weak and ,ruel even
among christians, we will wrest from
thee. with fire and sword, thy empire
and kingdom, and likewise overthrow
aud annihilate the See of Rome and
it's triple crown. This. Emperor of
Germany and KING of Poland, is our
declaration to thee and to all thy de-
pendents; and we moreover inform
thee that these words will speedily be
followed by deeds, for which thou
hast to hold myself in readiness
Given in OR powerful CITY Stamboul,
containing 1 $50 streets, 80 hospitals.
/ 900 public baths, 997 fountains, 1870
markets, 115 stables for mules, 4S0
inns for foreigners. 1,5s2 great and
small schools, 4, 122 mosques and
churches. This great aud powerful
city is four German miles in circum-
ference, and on its walls are 36s strong
towers. Our ancestors wrested it from
the hands of the christians, whose
wives and children were murdered
before their eyes. Thus will we treat
thee and all christians, to prove our
hatred and disdain. Given in the 25th
year of our age, and the seventh of
our potentreign. Signed
MoLo MAHOMET.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Partial Loss of Memory.
London Globe.

Sick persons have been known to
lose all remembrance of what has hap
rened to them during their sickness,
and sometimes, stranger still, of the
period Immediately preceding their
sickness, while easily recalling what
went before and followed after. T.e
brains play odd tricks with us at times,
especially when it has been subjected
to sudden snocs and scientific men
who think that It's various cOnvul-
Sions are the seats of various faculties
Of the mind derive some conhrmatloa
of their theory from the fact that the
power of memory may fail without
any failure of general intelligence,
and may fail IN part without being
altogether impaired. A notable in
stance of this last mentioned peculI
arity occurred about a dozen years
ago. a lad in the country was &C
cused of throwing another into the
pond, and he was put on trial before &
bench of magistrates. His elder
brother, who bore high character in
the village both for conduct and for
mental shrewdness had seen the pre-
vious struggle between the lads, and
he was called upon to give evidence.
He declared his belief that the fight
was perfectly fair throughout, and
that the immersion in the pond was
an accident. Questioned as to what
took place afIerward, Re could not
speak TO single circumstance, Did
the prisoner attempt to rescue the de-
ceased7" the chairman asked him. He
could not say. "The bench under
stand that you leaped into the water
and recovered the body" "They tell
me so, he said, "but | have no recol
lection of it," 1.-THE constable has
told us that you Owed twice, brought
out the body, and carried it to the
parents house" Il have not the
slightest remembrance. l only knew
shat | was ct home in bed at s o'clock"
six hours later" and the last thing
| could remember was seeing poor
Smith fall over the edge" There
could be no doubt that the witness was
speaking the truth and he could have
had no object in doing otherwise. The
shock which he had received on see
ing the fatal result of his brothers
quarrel had paralyzed his brain; the
memory was interrupted by those few
hours, though in all other respects ho
had acted like man in the full pos
session of his senses.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
BrignOli's Story.

Brignoli. the famous tenor singer.
recently related a story, which illus
trates how foreign accent sometimes
changes the sense of a word to En-
gliSh ears:
He was singing in a concert for a
charitable object. The prima donna
was suddenly attacked with singers
sore threat, and it became necessary
that some one should apologize to the
audience.
The manager declared he was suf-
fering from nervousness, and could
not do it, and he begged Brignoli to
make the explanation. The tenor,
going forward, said:
Ladies and gentlemen, | regret to
zay zat Mdme. N eez q ltetle horse
dis evening"
Peals of laughter greeted this an
nouncement, and the tenor looked
puzzled, thinking the audience mis-
understood him. He advanced once
more, and with laundering emphasis
roared out:
Il gay Eat Mdne N eez leetle
horse dis evening"
Another roar of laughter. amid
which voice in the gallery cried out,
Then if she Is horse, why not trot
her ouiF,
Thea the mistake was plain to him,
andiBrignoli laughed as heartily as any
one.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
A HAUNTED MANSION.
The Home of the Woman who Was
Frozen to Death on Long Peak.

WATERBURY, Conn, Oct. Sin the
center ofthis beautiful manufacturing
9th stands a handsome mansion sur
rounded by spacious grounds. WldC
carriage drives and winding walks APP
proach it over broad. green terraces
and under lnterlading foliage. Every
thing about it is arranged for comfort
and to please the eye. The mansion
is of the Gothic style of architecture,
most popular twenty years ago, and
has always been looked upon as one
of the finest dwellings in Western
Connecticut. As the city increased
in population it grew around this
place, the value of which was greatly
increased by its central locality. But
now the place is looked upon with
a sort of fear, and people instinctively
shudder as they pass it, dreading to
look up into It's groves and lawns
through fear of seeing some spirit of
evil. This fear has increased since
the last tragic event connected with
the place-the death of its mistress,
Miss Carrie J. Weltoh, who was
frozen to death on Longs Peak,
Colorado.
The house was first built by
wealthy manufacturer by the name
of Scoville. Mr.. Scoville's second
manager was unfortunate, his wife
being much addicted to strong drink.
Unable to remain in his elegant man
sion with her, he unceremoniously
departed, and soon died, a broken
down man. The property then pass
ed into the hands of Joseph G. Wei
ton, President of the Waterbury
Brass Company, and connected with
ABOUT all of the manufacturing inter
ests here. One night, on returning
from New York, Mr.. Welton heard a
commotion in the barn. Going
thither, he found two of his own
horses loose and he went in the stall
to separate them His favorite horse
kicked him in the breast. infiicting
wounds from which he soon died,
leaving no will. The estate was
divided between his wife and only
daughter, Carrie, the house going to
the wife Amity ruled until the
mother tried to get the daugher into
an insane asylsm. The household
was then again broken up, and the
nOuSc W dS IClL W SHOSIS- ohC VI thC
many freaks of the spirits is the be-
smirching of the door knob of the best
chamber with a substance like
coagulated blood which reappears
every morning after being wiped off.
Several families have attempted TO
reside their since the Wettons left,
but 5000 gave it up, although not
publicly assigning any reasons there
for. Mrs. Welton had returned to
the mansion before going to Europe,
and the Furnishings there belong to
her, but the house is closed and wears
a forbidding look All sort of stories
are in circulation to day about the
old mansion, one of which was that
the daughter had been seen In the
yard on horseback at midnight. Al
though the property was put on the
market at a low figure, it is i'm
possible to sell it, as it Is firmly
believed that curse rests upon it.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
The Tramps Device.
Texas Siftings.

An indignant tramp, accompanied
by very small companion, asked for
something to eat, remarking: five
not had anything to eat for two
weeks"
please don't!" said the other.
Tin starving to death, continued
the applicant.
PLEASE don'tl" again cried his COM
panion.
my shoes aro dropping off my
feet with the hungerl" he pathetically
exclaimed
please don't!" whined the small
tramp.
Starvation is driving me to desper-
ation!" savagely cried the beggar.
please DON'T" again cried the
other
"What is the little man saying
please don't for?" asked the house
wife.
"He thinks I'm going to eat him,
ma'am,'' said the tramp.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
COceanut as Food.

The extremely nutriIive qualities of
the cocoanut are comparatively little
understood, yet for sus aiming life and
vigor it will compare most favorably
with the bestknown food products of
the vegetable garden. The FIJI Times,
in calling attention recently to this
fact, relates an instance of vessel
which once left San Francisco with
four hundred passengers for Sydney.
Running short of stores they were
obliged to put in at Samas, where a
large quantity of cocoanuts were OBJ
tanned; the remainder of the passage
was attended with heavy weather,
and the vessel became waterlogged,
only reaching Sydney after perl1ous
journey of eighty days Owing to the
extreme length of the voyage their
provisions ran out, and men, women
and children were reduced to an ex-
elusive diet of cocoanut; and o wing
to the scarcity of these the quantity
apportioned was IN the proportion of
of one cocoanut to each adult. Not
withstanding this diet, wholly unre-
lieved by any change, net life was
lost and not a single case of illness
occurred, all the passens gers landing
in healthy condition. Another in
stance is mentioned, in which two
men drifted in a whale-boat upon
Quire island, where they remained
for seven years before they were res,
cued. They had no food except cocoa
nuts, varied by an occasional flying
fish, and yet, when rescued, were in
excellent condition, and had gained
In weie ht.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Onsartin Times in Politics.
Detroit Free Press.

Powerful sight o pollyticks ar
oun' dis fall, observed Uncle Billy ID
a patrolman on Russell stree few
days ago.
Yes
Powerful embarrassin' times, too.
for some o. US
Il presume so.
Powerful hard on an ole man like
me- not to know exactly what to do =
'.Ho rs thati"
Wall, when stranger takes you
out in de back yard and whispers dat
he'll gin you g fur yer vote OATS one
sort o. embarrassment When he
doan' come down wld de cash OATS
anoder sort. When he's dun cl'ared
out an ye can't disremember his name
nor de ticket ne wanted yer TO vote
dat mixes ye all up an &c amt fit to
do dizziness. Powerful onsartin tunes
fur Gle folks ike me.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Not a Dude.
Detroit Free Press.

A boy about Is years of age begged
of a lady on Second street to hunt
him up an old hat, as mis- head cover
ing was no longer any protection.
she rummaged around the house for
twenty minutes and found stiff hat
which her husband threw aside last
spring. 1t was in perfect condition,
and looked well, but, as tie boy re-
ceived it, he banged 1t with his fist
until it showed a dozen bruises, and
tie rim was twisted out of shape.
Mercy on me, what do you meant
gasped the astonishsd lady.
'sThankee, mum, he replied, as he
clapped the tile on his head, Il don't
propose to be taken for no dude
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
A Gentle Hint.


A prosy munster IN country
church, when he bad reached his
"twelfthly" became thirsty, and not
finding any water on the shelf under
the pulpit, called TO deacon:
Brother Brown, there's no water
here"
do you waKt sonnet" inquired the
deacon.
Yes, I'm mighty dry"
\ glass was brought, and the
preacher proceeded to gulp it down.
Mr.. Goodlow," whispered the dea.
cSn, waiting for the glass.
We'll, what is it, asked the preach
err stopping his libation.
Don't you think you'd better offer
little to your sermonl"
The discourse was knocked out IN
the next round.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
The American peas.Letter Office.

Some very curious and funny letters
are received at the dead letter office.
The outside of some IS more unique
than the inside. The following are
the addresses on the envelops of sew
eral which have found their way to
the dead-letter Office. They show the
poetical bent of the writers:
Fly. little messenger, quick andstraight,
To Humboldt county, of Iowa state;
Fly, little messenger, and seek with care
For Miss Annie Fahey: you'll find her there.
Unfortunately there was no stamp
on it and the matter-of-fact postmaster
hustled 1t off to the dead-letter office.
A trusting parent writes on the en-.
veIope of his letter:
Please send this letter TO my son, who drives
team of red oxen, and the railroad runs through
his place.
Another envelope has:
Bummer's letter; send it ahead;
Dead broke and nary red;
Postmaster, put this letter through,
And when get paid I'llpay you,
Another envelope has this address:
James Irwin. Try all over the state"
Still another brief address is: n.
A. Cenyon, P. NJ, H."
A would-be housekeeper puts on the
envelope:
p NJ, please forward to the physician who was
looking for housekeeper in St. Louis last week!
is a widower with two children; don't know his
name.
This is no doubt an answer to an ad-
vertisement 1t is pity the widower
did not get it.
Another envelope has:
To General W. Knowles this letter is sent,
To the town of Brighton, where the other one
went.
No matter who wrote it-a friend or foe
To the State of New York hope it will go.
But it went to the dead letter office
ms tead.
Another envelope has:
Hello Uncle Sam, let me go in your mail,
As I've taken a notion to ride on 4 rail
To Illinois State, and there let me stop,
And in M'Lean Co., just please let me drop;
In LIE Roy p. o there let me lay,
Until Reason X. Gray takes me away.
But the postmaster's reply, just be-
low, says:
Played out my dear boy.
There's no use in talking,
If ya1 can't pay your way
You'll have To try walking.
One who was careful to pay postage
wrote.
Now haste with this letter as fast as you can,
I've just paid your fare to good Uncle Sam,
The Is quite urgent, so don't stop to think,
Don't tarry for lunches or even drink.
Where the people are honest good natured and
Frank Taylor, the man to whom you must go,
Is at 46, Lyman street, Cleveland, Ohio.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Had Lots of sand.

"Yousee that distinguished looking.
man over therel1
Yes, Ny gracious what style he
puts on, doesn't he2"
Hes one of our biggest men; got
lots of sand
Where did he make his money!
In the sugar business, believe
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Must Have Patience.
Merchant Traveller.

Il know my, dear" said the young
doctor to his wife, that we are not
rich; but after a while our luck will
change and we viii have everything
we want. You must learn to have
patience.
Don't preach what you don't
practice. II you'd learn 10 have
patients we would sson be out of
trouble. and she whisked out of the
room SO full of feeling that she slop-
ped over at the eyes.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

A new method of gambling with
monkeys has been started in England,
which for pure invention is worthy of
our modest "bunko" men. The specu-
lator sells the assembled public
twenty-four various colored tickets al
shilling apiece. He then places
twenty four similarly colorel balls in
bag. and trai.ed monkey comes
forward and picks one out. The win
ner gains e.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Association OF IdcNs.

Macready was once victimized in
"Nirginius The Numitorius could
not remember his own name.
You will rememberit sir" said the
tragedian, carefully pronouncing it
for HIM, "by the association of ideas
Think of Numbers-the book of Mum
bers'
The Numitolius did think of it all
day, and at night produced, through
1.-The association of ideas" the follow
ing effect;
Numitorius: "Where is Virginia ?
Wherefore do you hold that maiden
hand2'
Claudius; "Who asks the question:
Numitorius: Il, her uncle, Deuter-
onomviN
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

The queen snubbed the prince of
Wales and one or two other person
ages pretty severely when they pro-
posed to her majesty that Baker Pasha
should be connected with Lord Wolse-
ley's Egyptian expedition. She in
formed the prince and the rest that
her decision in regard to ex-Colonel
Valentine Baker was uRalterable.
and that she wished to hear no more
about it.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

hand and threw il on the coast. Hence
the moito-a badge which was adopt
ed by King James L, on the creation
of the order of baronets, each of whom
has the figure of "a hand" inserted in
his shield.
That of 0nslow is jeu de mot
"On slow'-viz Hasten forward
with caution" So is that of Synge-
I'VE sing of heavenly thlngs;" and
of Peterborough Edward Law.
Law and equity combined The
motto of the Louis family-"In Cano-
pc ut ad Cdnopunl"-is the most OBJ
scure in the whole list, and even Sir
Bernard Burke himself is obliged to
abandon the attempt to get at the
meaning
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

Opening an Indian mound near
Wheeling, w. Va, among other
trinkets was found pair of copper
earrings, rolled or hammered into thin
plates, and stamped or pressed into
concave and convex ridges or rings
The rings resembled the ornaments
seen in the ears of the figure cut on
stone by the Maya people in Yucatan.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
An AlligatOr's Impolite Trick.
New Orleans Picayune.

wall, eff dat want de blame'est
caper eber seed" exclaimed an old
negro who sat on the bank of bayou
fishing. Whats the matter9' some
one asked. IVY, sab, jis' now my
dog he cummed erlong an laid down
at my feet, an jis' dis minnlt er alh-
gator he slips up an grabs de dog an
takes him erway. De imperlltis trick l
ever seed Minis me o niger
preacher at err barbecue.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

AruraI cousle recently took passage
in Philadelphia horse car Wien
the car became crowded the bride
groom offered his seat to lady. "Oh,
William, where are you goiDgf said
the bride .sNowhere. I'll stand right
here The bride looked Indignantly
at the lady who had accepted the seat.
well, William, if you've got to stand
I'll stand too" And she did.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

Mrs. Bull, the widow of Ole Bull,
aud the unmarried daughters of Mr..
Longfellow left Liverpool few days
ago for Boston. They have been on a
trip to Norway.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
A New Way 10 Pay Old Debt>.

Shakespeare tells how this can be accomplished
in one of his immortal plays; Lut debts To nature
must be paid on demand unless days of grace be
obtained through the use OF Dr.. PierceS 'tiostom
Medical Discovery" 1t is not cure ali btrr
invaluable for sore throat, bronchitis, asthma
catarrh, consumption, ana AL diseases of the pat
monary and other organs, caused by scrorula o.
bad blood" Scrofulous ulcers, swelling and
tumors are cured by its wonderful Alternative
ton By druggists,
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17
Iowa County Democrat
THE KNIGHTS MESSAGE.

She stood beside the castle gate,
And watch'd her faithful knight depart:
Westward he rode with martial state,
And westward with him went her heart.
When her fond eyes no more could trace,
The Lady Edith turn'd away,
And sadly moved with ashen face
Towards whore her sleeping first-born lay.
Then from her heart uprose that cry
or agony, distraught and wild:
"Geoffrey is gone, perchance 10 die!
And we are left, my child, my child"
IT'S night. What breathless warrior stands,
Beneath the castles frowning walls
And audience Graves not; but demands
or the fair mistress of those hallsg
who knocks so lateg" warder cries,
His ready hand upon his sword:
Half hush d, a we'll known voice replies,
Il bring ye tidings Of your lord.
"Oh! tell me hath the cruel foe
Robbd me Of him more dear than NE:
Fear not to break thy tale OF woe,
Thou kneel'st before soldier wlie.
Awhile no word the vassal speaks
Then, rising from his Bonded knees
The death like silence thus he breaks
"The knights last words TO me were these:
'Retrace thy conrse with might and main,
Seek Lady Edith quick, and tell her
That I'm dIrdid it's going 10 ram.
and ask her JOF my htiDt5eTeitcT.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

MASON & HAEI.N commenced "a Inelod"On
makers in 1854. They soCn introduced lie inn
proved instrument now known the organ, or
American organ, as il is termed in ET.ope The
took the place of everything oise in this countiy.
being adopted and manufactured by Ill had
previously made me.odeons, and man, Others
who were induced to commence the business by
the rapidly growing demand. Now about S0OGd
American organs are made and sold yearly
Those by the Mason & Hamiin Company have
always stood at the head being acknowledged
the best. The same makers are now producing
improved Upright Piapofortes, wi ch. taey he
lieVe are destined 10 rank as his their organs
have done Boston T9dCelier
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1884-10-17

Among the little stories which John
Bull has laid up againt his enemy
across the Channal this summer is one
about a Frenchwomen whose maid
attended her to her sea bath with an
immense wig of long hair, which she
pinned on the head of her mistress
when she came from her dressing
room, after allowing sufficient time
to elapse dry her tresses. A few
locks of the lady's own hair, carefully
allowed to remain damp, were
mingled with the rest, and the dacep-
ton almost perfect, but, as usual, it
was detected at last.