The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-02-22
A LADY.LIKE COW.
Why q Good Man IIankered for the
Blood of Nick Parish.

Blood of Nick Parish.
Nothing more than good, kind
hearted and gentle milch cow rounds
off and tempers down the many diff
culties standing in the way of family
contentment. When Parson Jilminson
moved into our neighborhood, his first
question was, "Whos got gentle COW
for sale?" Old Nick Parish, one of
the best-known and most upright men
in the community, had gentle cow. If
man wanted fiery, unsubdued horse,
Nick had him; and If he wanted a
horse so quiet in demeanor that he re-
Trained from lashing the flies, Nick
had him. In fact. Nick had anything
that anybody wanted to buy, and one
thing peculiar about his ability to
furnish the great market of wants
was that every animal he sold was ex-
actly what he represented it to be.
"Is she good milker?" asked Parson
Jilnlinson when he had gone to Nick's
lot and begun an inspection of the
COW.
BEST in the land, and the one fine
pint about her is that she'll give
enough milk for any family. When
ever she changes hands she sizes up
the new family, and if she amt broad
enough to accommodate all concerned,
why she changes her gauge. But she
is not prodigal. l bought her from a
hotel mann. She had been giving
enough milk for all the guests, but
when she saw that l only had small
family, she changed her metre and
came down to our measure"
II never before heard of such a
cow said the parson.
Nobody else, and if my wife didn't
try to impose on her wouldn't sell
her for anything. You see my wife is
very ambitious woman and wants
this one cow to furnish enough milk
for the operation of an entire dairy
form. l will not allow even my wife
to monkey with the affections of this
animal. Just look at her Did you
ever see anything more lady-like !?
There she stands, the very picture of
courtesy, willing to inundate the entire
community with milk"
"What is the least you'll take for
her?" the parson added.
"Wel, III tell you. If it want for
the pints I've presented, wouldn't
sell her for no price, but as it is, you
may have her for a hundred dollars. +"
The money was paid without
hesitation, and in triumph the parson
drove the cow home. "Greatest COW
in the world" he said to his wife, as
he turned the animal into the back
yard. ''The man had sentimental
reasons for selling her or we would
never have been her fortunate pos
SCISSORS"
The next day was Sunday. The
parson had an appointment to preach
at the neighboring church, but when
the time for services arrived, the par
son was seen crossing the common
carrying an army gun. As he ap-
preached Parish's house, Parish was
seen to leap the fence, and start off in
practical and commercial-like man
ner toward the woods. The parson
discovered him, threw up his gun and
fired, and so much powder had his in.
dignation demanded in the execution
of his sanguinary design, that the bull
let, long after the excitement had sub
sided was heard whizzing around the
ueighborhood.
"What on earth is the matter, par
SOM" asked dozen voices. as the
minister approached the church and
proceeded to load mis- gun.
Bought COW from that scoundrel
Told me she was gentle. Wife got VI
this morning to milk her ! though
| l heard mutterings and other sounds
expressive of dissatisfaction, ant
stepping to the door, l saw my wifi
going over the ash hopper My wifi
is a woman Of unusual agility, yet
saw no reason why she should sal
around through the air on Sunda.
morning, so l stepped out and told he
to hold up, when saw my lady-like
COW, raking up ridges and acting a
though she were displeased. l spok,
to her and she darted at me. l triet
to avoid her, but failed. ] went owe
the ash hopper pretty much as m.
wife had done. This was not the ent
of the performance. The COW coult
not get around behind the ash hopper
but she made it sensational for us b.
reminders that she was still in circu
lation. The dog came over and fel
among us. Then a wash-board.
brass kettle, the cat and the hired DO,
came over. l never saw anything lik
it. Every time | looked up, some
thing would strike me. After awhil
ME began to throw dirt and chips owe
until thought we would all be buried
yelled for help, and old Mrs. Piggle