Cooperstown courier. (Cooperstown, Griggs Co., Dak. [N.D.]) 1883-1884, 1884-02-08
A GOOD ONE.
The way Eli Perkins Reports Him
self as Getting Away With
st. Paul IntervieWcrs.
fargo Argue.

Sometimes a goOd thing will crop out
rom among the driftwood Of everyday
journalism. Mr.. +. s. johnson, one Of
,he handsomest, most energetic and pop ,
llar members Of the Pioneer Press staff,
IS made the subject OF an Eli Perkins
letter. Mr.. johnson has many friends
in Fargo and countless admirers every
where. No one for an instant will be-
lieve the story, but then the joke is SO
good that even he must appreciate it.
The Minneapolis Evening journal
prints the following with headlines stat
ing: ED. johnson attempts to inter-
view Eli Perkins, but gets interviewed.
How Ed. Accounts rthedisappearance
OF the magnificent city OF Minneapolis
ST. Paul surveying the earth for sub
urbs."
Editor Evening Journal; Sitting in
my room at the Merchants, i'll st. Paul,
yesterday morning, received II call
from a very intelligent and handsome
gentleman. After saying good morning,
the courteous gentleman advanced, took
me by the hand and informed me po-
ltely that his name was johnson: Ed.
Il. johnson, OF the Pioneer Press.
"Your name is Perkins, ''he said, ELI
Perkins, and have come to interview
you"
Are you the managing editor" l in-
terrupted.
"Yes, I'm the managing editor-act-
ing managing editol-and should like
to inform you that st. Paul is"
eleven miles from Minneapolis" l
interrupted.
acknowledgements" re-
pe:.ted the interviewer, as he rubbed his
brow thoughtfully with his left hand.
III ito not think there is such a place.
Still, if my memory does not fail me,
there used to be. Min-ne-ap-o-lls," he
repeated dreamily, "wly yes, there used
to be :. town by that name somewhere
up Oh the headwaters Of the Mississippi,
but it's gone now. Alas, il is all gone.
The last inhabitant came away from
there i, year ago.
/ "You astound me, Mr.. Johnson" l
exclaimed. II thought Minneapolis was
quite thriving place"
Eyes. many eastern people make that
mistake. That is why l FASTENED to
inform you of the exact status here be-
fore you go further into the state. a
Journalist YOU know should be we'll in-
formed
"Well. what became of Minneapolis?'
| asked.
lit IS a sad, sad story, said MIR. John
son with sigh. lit makes me weep t
tell it, but few years ago she began t.
be struck with mildew, and"
..Flour millew, wasn't it?' ! asked.
.sNo, Just common, ordinary inildew
Some call it rust. First the railroads
:, began to move down to st. Paul. Thel
, the citizens began to tear down thell
= houses, The roof was taken OIL Of tll'
>. ;. West house, and now nothing but th'
bare walls remain. You can see TIN
West house ruins now if you go up thele
: Then. when the flour mills We're moved
! to St. Paul the last hope was gone ant
I ..But why did they move the flour mills
. away" asked.
..Well. YOU see the river dried up.
. was sorry about that, for if the rivert'a'
e remained, they would still have hat
j their fishery interests. Yes, alas the.
u could still have caught fish and tina
: would have prevented absolute starva
. . tion.'
u Ibid many lie?" asked eagerly.
mo. but they would have died if W
e hadn't sent up an expedition from 81
g Paul and rescued them. Yes" contir
. ued Mr.. johnson, wiping his eyes, ''w
J: J. carried provisions up there and save
u their lives, and"
l. And nothing is left then of the ono
- tlouristing town of Minneapolis"
u "Nothing sir--nothing. Excuse m
u emotion, SIR" and the faithful journals
buried his face in his hands. Larg
scalding tears trickled out between hi
fingers. and he seemed for some nj
:. ments unable to proceed. Then MOI
\. cheerful look overspread his counter
IS ance and he proceeded:
T. !. ssBut st. Paul is spreading up that wa
sir. and the place will soon. be coyere
with houses again. 1t might he worse.
'.What is the population OF st. Pa'
now?" asked.
!, Mine millions, not counting railroa
a agents, and if my judgement does nj
is fail me. continued Mr.. Johnson, figuriI
ON the wall with blue pencil, we wi
" l,o.,., <,la,,o,, r,a;ll;ona NV snrinD and