The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1884-07-31
TRIBUNETS.

The Judge; The vice that never sticks to young
people, though they more exposed to il than
any other-Ad-vice.
Every day comes some fresh instance Of one sex
invading the Others peculiar prerogatIves Patrick
AfeGof has just been jailed in Pittsbur for knock
ing his wife down with a dish-pan-
According TO ali reports. Toulon and the Tou-
lonese are abominably althy. that il the cholera
had not attacked them ought to go on theresred
List for Incompetence 70 perform duty.
Philadelphia Press: French scientists say the
doesn't want to enter into any silly competition
with the cigaret-
Keepers Of Summer hotels and fancy har-rooms
lament the great decrease IL the champagne drank
this season. That IS easy to explain: When rail-
road stocks tumble from 150 to 10 their owners SEQ
a charm in q ive-cent lemonade that completely
eclipses 8 bottle Of Veuve Chequot
Edwin Booth is oppressed with q taeiturnity and
rlelaneholia that greatly puzzles his physicians
We can explain It: It is remorse-remorse for the
way he has haTried the country with certainly thu
worst stock companies that any man ever dared
put the road
Some folks are always 50 willing TO have good
done al other folks expense. An Engiishnan
writes to the London Times % urge that frances
duty to prevent q cholera epidemic in Europe by
burning up AIarseilles and ToUlon, and he thinks
she can rely upon Christianity to reimburse her
for the loss" We VIII venture that he viii nos
contribute 50 much as q hslf-erowa to the reim-
bursement.
The Duke of Edinburg. a highly useless and very
monumental gentleman, whose support costs ths
English taxpayers about $4,000 per annun, has
been devoting the large surplus of leisure which he
has his hands to the collection of postage stamps
and now proudly announces that after years
hraE
10 for every working day. If Is Royal Ighness has
any energy left after completing this colossal work
he might devote it to assisting his wife to get up
crazy quilt.
It is not often that find as frank an admission
as this one from Spanish Socialist paper:
1t is with Indignation that we inform our readers
that cur former co-laborer Arostigui has left the
editorial staff The immediate Cause Of his depart
ure was a legacy of 5000 pilstres left him by his
grandmother Yesterday he informed one Of his
friends that he considered his new position ncor-
patible with our theories.
II IS the old story. The man who hasn't any
farm wants general distribution OF the lands inn
mediately, while the man who has farm looks
with horror on anything tending to disturb owner
ship of real estate
Another cherished picture Of our youth has 70
have the negative re-touehed, and the lights and
shades so altered as to almost destroy the likeness
What schOol-bov has not been fascinated with thu
The picture showed she bird rOostng on one Of the
highest peaks OF the Andes, like hen on the
ridge-pole of q barn-propOrtions about the same
and surveying abe whole continent from the Isth-
mus of Darien to Cape Horn, with one eomprehen-
sive glance. The description told how it had wings
like the sails of a boat and fight as swift and
strong as that of malicious SANDER: that il made
its home and laid its eggs iE the eternal SHOWS
miles above the Clouds and yet in an Instant could
sweep from the. glaciers of the mcuntain-sops to
the burning sands OF the deserts in the valley with
out being IN the least Inconvenience by the rapid
change In temperature. This impressive descriu-
ton seems 70 be fairly true and the great vultare
with is l2-foot spread of wing swiflness of flight
marvellous sight, and nests 29eD0 feet above the
level OF the IS the most wonderful OF the bird
creations For CT that its nambaTs and voraeity
nave made It such intOlerabe nuisance sha5
Chilli has 0utlawed Il as AN enemy Of the Repah-
hc, by formal proclamation. which places n
price OF s. on its headl TIE PeFGvians and B0liv-
ians are making similar war upon 1t, but none Of
them are very sangulne OF success. Its eye "a as
quick as a crows IN detecting the approach Of a
gun and to climb icy cliffs four or 1--WE miles hish 20
destroy its eggs would probably he more destrfsct-
i've of the climbers than OF the embryonic coBaors
So, IN spite OF all efforts for its destruction thu
bird Is increasing In numbers, aad our ehildren'3
children studying geography will bs delighted
with the picture OF the old condor, peFcned
on the backbone Of the South American Continent
and calmly serutinizinss Brazil Peru Chill Bolivia
and the Argentine Confederation In search Of saw
dead mules Tar breakfast.