The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1884-10-01
TO wouLD-BE RuNAwAYs.
Sage Advice 40 Youthful Aspirnnts for
Greater GiOrjcs then they Have
at Home.


at Home.
Come, now, my lad, but you want to run
away. No boy ever yet reached the age Of
10 without having several times firmly re-
solved to leave home. When bow hns
made up his mind to thing of this sort he
ought to carry it out by all means. The
nrss step IN the programme Is to begin saw
ing up bread and meat. When you have o
bushei or so of provisions hidden In tho
barn, or under the woodshed, you ore ready
for the battle with the cold world. Make
your start at night. This will prevent the
sun from tanning your complexion, and YOU
will be quite certain OF tho company of
tramp or two.
Some boys leave note pinned to the pill
low OF their bed. This note goes ON TO say
that the boy has been jawed, bulldozed.
starved, pounded, and knocked down and
dragged out, until he has made up his mind
to sever the connection. He will never bs
heard of more. 1t is probably the best way
to leave note of this kind, as the family
are then made TO fully realize their cruelty
IN driving the poor boy out among stran.
gers.
When you have packed up your little
bundle and are off, it will be we'll to settle
upon some plan for the future. Perhaps
you want to be sailor2 Nothing Is easier.
Make your why to some lake or seaport
and most any Captain will take you. II he
can't disgust you with the sailoring business
In about week, tar buckets, seasickness.
poor provisions, and ropes end will DO
called upon to assist him.
Perhaps you want 70 become mighty
hunter3 Mighty hunters nro not made in a
few days or weeks. You want to begin by
letting your hair and finger nails grow,
sleeping IN q swamp, and wasting $40 worth
of ammunition to kill ten-oent chipmunk.
II you have decided to become bank
clerk, we'll and good. Make tracks for the
nearest city, and the first bank you ente,
will jump at the chance of employing You
at salary of S200 per MONTH II it should
SO happen that the bank didn't do any
jumping as you made your application, you
can console yourself with the reflection that
it Is about TO bust. ~.
But, speaking In all seriousness, my boy,
II had dozen soma / should he glad to
have each and every one of them take his
turn at running away from home. II is the
best cure in the world for that disease caeled
swoll-head." There's heap of romance
in the Idea Of running away. You think of
the sparkling sea, the green prairies coral
strands, robbers caves, and pirates treas
ures. You feel that you know 30 much
moro than your father that IL is waste of
brains for both of you to remain in the
Same house. You have boon forced to 20 TO
school, and have been ordered TO split
wood, and go to the grocery after butter like
o common slave. Don't stand 1t any longer
Pick up your duds md leave the house and
20 forth into the world. an
What Come to full stop in the road
before you are q mile away You've got q
peck or more of sour meat and mouldy
hraaa In a sSiiis..-.-- a.
your pocket, and just think how your father
and mother. have misused you at home
The romance begins to VICAR of, chi You
don't care half "a much about mermaids
and palm groves and pirate ahips as you did
an hour ago. You hnte to leave mother
after all. and perhaps father isn't 30 much
TO blame for bossing you around Come to
think il all over, perhaps you'd better re-
turn home and try and stand II for fow
more weeks.
All my son, but we've oil been there
ALI these wrinkled, and digniAed, and bald
headed old men you meet on the streets
have had about the same experience. We've
had that same period Of swell-head," and
eight out of ten of US have packed our bun
dies and slid out to escape parental tyran-
ny. Eight out of ten of US have slipped
back again, too, and the experience was the
right sort of medicine for the disease. Any
time you come TO feel that you are q poor,
overworked, and downtrodden boy, and
that II you only had fair show you'd know
more In minute than your father does In
On hour, Just skip. There's nothing like II.