Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-05-11
BROTHER sHINBoNEs CAUGHT.
He Visits the Wrong Hen-RoOst and
Warns the Mourning Brethren

The shades of night came down over the
city of Hoboken, on Thursday, says the
New York Times, just as they had done
for many years. Slowly and peacefully
the evening spread its arms around the
city, and the beer saloons were crowded
with weary citizens seeking refreshment
at the shrine Of Gambrinus. The hours
wore on and the witching time of mid
night drew near. 1t was then that an OBJ
server, if there had been one, might have
seen solitary traveller tOiling up hill
like one of q. i. K. James solitary horse
men, only he was on foot. The burden of
60 years and weather-stained gunny-bag
was bending his shoulders. Up the high
hill, like Sisyphus, he urged his load with
many grOan.
"GOrramighty" he meditated, "dis hyar
ole niggah haint so powahful strong ez he
useter was bout fOahty yeah ago. Jess
reckon dis hyar chile cud ha' run up de
hill like six-day-go-as-yOu-kin walkah.
DE Wuld am a-gittin' Oldah, and dis hyar
niggah haint a-gettin' no youngah."
The reader must have discovered by
this time that the solitary traveller was no
other than Brother ShinbOnes Smith, once
the President of that influential organiza-
ton known as the Anti-Chicken Stealing
Society of HObOken. The glory of the So
ciety had gone; its days had been num-
| bered, and its influence for good had
ceased to be felt in the community. The
community was aware of the fact too.
The nocturnal disappearance of chickens
| from carefully built coOps aud pens was
regular occurrence. Brahmas, DOminicks
and Bantams all went. 1t made no diff
| ference to the members of the disOrgan-
lied club. They must have chickens.
Brother ShinbOnes wendell his way up
the hill, and at the top paused for rest.
Cautiously looking around he satisfied
himself that all the white folks IN the
neighbOrhOOd had retired to rest. Then he
moved forward once more in the direction
of a house occupied by a gentleman
named-singularly enough-JOhn Smith.
Brother ShinbOnes knew that Mr.. Smith
kept chickens; he knew, moreover, that
his stock had not been touched by the
brethren. Brother Shinbones proposed to
have the first haul from that chicken
coop, and he was now about to carry out
his idea. He walked around to the side of
the house, and treading cautiously on the
grass crawled through hole in the fence
where picket had been knocked out. 1t
was reported in HOboken subsequently
that Pete Maguff had Whitewashed that
very fence that very day, and had knocked
out that very picket, and some persons
thought that this circumstance pointed to
a conspiracy, but this could not be estab-
lished.
Brother ShinbDnes having wOrmed him.
self into the yard, crept silently toward
the chicken-hOuse. In a few moments he
had reached his objective point, the Win
dow of the chicken-house. Then he found
pile of sawed wood conveniently ar
ranged, so that by standing on it he could
reach the window. Drawing from his bag
a glass-cutter, Brother Shinbones, as
nOiselessly as possible, cut out pane of
glass, and inserting his hand, unfastened
the window. Then he opened it, and with
unerring instinct, reached forward, seized
a fat hen and pumped her into the bag
before she had time to crOak more than
once. He seized one more and treated her
in the same manner. Then he descended
from the pile of wood and retraced his
steps toward the hole in the fence. A
smile of content spread over his dark
features. He stopped down, crawled
through the hole, and rising to his full
height on the other side. drew a long
breath. AT the same moment some one
else arose to his full height, and drew
long BREATH and then spoke:
"Good morning, Brother ShinbOnes," he
said.
SsWaI, goshamity, Mistah Sniff, am dat
you?"
Eyes, ShinbOnes."
"'Pears like yo'se up mighty airly dis
mawnin'."
Not quite so early as you, Brother Shin
bones"
Dunno, dunno, chile; looks like you's
up mos too airly fob me-"
''What have you in that bag, Brother
ShinbOnes?"
I'm de bag? Oh, de bagl Wal, yo' see,
Brudder Pete Maguff lef some o. he's
tings hyar, an KEN up ter git 'em."
''Pm afraid that story will not do"
"Jess eZ good eZ amy edder."
4
have to ask you to stay here all night and
90 with me in the morning to see Judge
Brown
'Lawd-a-massey, Mistah Sniff, dis hyar
niSgah haint got no beznisS wild Jedse
Brown. Umph umphs Him an me haint
on speakin' tarms."
'Wen, / guess you'd better come"
''Nuh, / reckon not; Pm in kinder
hurry now. Good night, Mistah Smif;
much 'blige fur yO' kind invite"
''Wait moment, Shinbones. Do you
see this?'
''Wot dat?7
'''Dat' is a seven-barreled revolver,
loaded in every barrel. l don't want to
transfer the contents OF the barrels to your
body but l shall feel obliged to do so il
you refuse TO stay.'
'sWal. now. Mistah Sniff, sence yO're so
berry 'tIkaler bout it, [ guess dis hyar
niggah bettah stay. GOrramighty, Mistah
Sniff, yo'se bout de mos hOrspitable man
wot ebber meet in de whole course OBJ
my life, dat's wOt you am. Pm right glad
fur ter tink dat knows yer"
And Mr.. Smith took Brother Shinbones
bv the arm and led him into the house.
There he locked Brother Shinbones up Sc
curelY. and in the morning drove him over
to Judge Browns Court. The courtroom
was crowded with cOlOred citizens, for
Mrs. ShinbOnes had spread abroad the
news of her lords disappearance, and
every one knew in moment what must
have happened to him. The weight of
evidence was Overwhelmingly against the
eX-President.
Judge Brown remarked that he would
omit the fine which the law permitted
him to impose in consideration of the
prisoners age, but he must make an eX-
ample of him. He therefore sentenced
ShinbOnes to three months imprisonment
in the county Jail.
'Jedge,' remarked Shinbones, ''dis hyar
am pretty tough on old man,
1.-The law requires it." was the reply.
oval, cud l be lowed ter speak ter this
hyar gadderin' OBJ cullud pussOns?'
The permission was granted, and the
eX-President turned to the assemblage:
'Breddern and sistern," said he, "Pse
gwine way fur ter leah yo' now fur some
time. Dey am gwine ter send me whar de
wicked cease from troublin' an de weary
git res. l mean dose dat am weary OBJ
losin' DER poultry. Now, breddern, all
Fse got ter say to yo' on dis hyar painful
'cashin' is, eff yO' don't want ter git inter
de place whar Pm a-gOin'@"
The speaker paused to add force to his
words. The Judge leaned forward to hear
the wise admOnitiOn about to fall from the
old mans lips, and the crowd of mourn
ing cOlored men and women held their
breath.
"Ef yo' don't want ter 90 whar Use
a-goin," he repeated, "make blame shuah
dat de boss am dead or gone ter picnic
fOah yo' tackle hen-rOOst."
And they led him away to prison.
-. -.,--,~, 800 xx-OxrRNr