Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1884-06-21
An Intricate Elopement.

A very painful and intricate affair has
occurred near Wheeling, West Va: One OF
the features Of the affair was an elopement,
and three men, awidow, q girl, and some
families and other parties were mixed up in
it in way that is simply maddening to the
reader Of the report sent out by a Wheeling
collector Of news.
The report begins with the apparently in
offensive assertion that the families Of
William Cook and Mrs. Jane Mccormick, a
widow are residents on adjoining farms"
This is clear, and as contribution to the
history of Monongahela county is doubtless
valuable. Its connection with the rest of
the si0ry is, however, by no means clear,
for we hear no more of Mr.. William Cook,
and are left to imagine his character, con-
dition and fate. We are next informed that
Jones is wealthy and Mrs. Mccormick is
poor This, too, is an interesting fact,
though the sudden introduction of Jones is
startling. End to some extent unjustiGable,
in view Of the reporters avowed pupose to
give an account Of an elopement With which
Jones apparently had no more to do than
William Cook, or any other innocent per
son.
Next We are introduced to Young
Jones, who, we are told, conceived a yio-
lent passion for Miss Mccormick" There
is good reason to believe that Young Jones
was species Of Jones entirely distinct from
the Jones of uncertain age but of undOubted
wealth. SO far the reader is in doubt as to
whether William Cook, the wealthy Jones,
or Young Jones is the person who eloped,
and although the fact that Young Jones
conceived violent passion renders it posi-
Die that he was the leading man IN the
elopement, there is no positive evidence in
support of this theory.
While the reader is trying to keep his
attention fixed on William Cook, Mrs Nc
Cormick, Jones the wealthy, and Young
Jones, his breath is fairly taken away BY
the suddenness of the announcement that
the girl first disappeared and the boy
secured horse from his father and also
disappeared" Who was the girl? Was
she the Widow Mccormick, or. as is more
probable, Miss Mccormick? And who was
the boy? Could this boy have been Vii,
liam Cook, and it so, has William Cook a
father; or was Young Jones the boy?
What with the necessity of finding some an
swer to these questions, and Of also retain
ing a mental grasp upon William Cook
Jones the wealthy; the Widow Mccormick
Miss Mccormick, the boy, the boys father,
the horse, and the girl, the reader will find
the story terrible strain upon the intellect
in the present hot weather.
The story goes on to say that when "they
came home meaning perhaps all the
JoGesS, McC9rmicks, Cooks, girls, boys and
horses the father though we are not
told what father-cut a switch and gave
him-say William Cook, young Jones, or
perhaps, the horse-a thraShing. The same
father Their sent him to a military school
which looks as if the culprit was not the
horse after all, but was perhaps the boy
who secured a parental horse. Not to be
outdone in enterprise the mother -anG
whether she was William Cooks mother, Oh
Young Jones mother, or merely a general
local mother the reader is left to decide
instituted a suit against Jones who was
probably the wealthy JOnes-in behalf Of
her daughter for damages, laying the sum
at $4,000, and alleging the alternating Of
her husbands affections. The mother
could not have been the Widow Mccormick
Tor that ady's husband was permanently
dead and his affections could not be alien
ated by any variety of Jones. As to the
concluding assertion that Jones claims that
II is a scheme to mulct him. there can be
little doubt that it is true That
male Jones should ALLEVIATE the affec
tons of any mo:her's husband is grossly
Improbable, even If Jones is wealthy More
over a vague mother who cannot be iden
tilted unless we regard her as the mother o
the greater part Of the population Of Monon
gahela county, does not command public re
Spect as woman of high character ana
genuine refinement, and she would be quit,
capable OF cOnceiying q scheme to mulct III,
wealthy Jones, and perhaps OF following
up hv mulcting William Cook and the rner
getic but unidentified father.
OF one thing only We NAV feel tolerahl'
sure and that is that somebody in MouOu
gahela county has eloped with Somebod
else Perhaps if an intelligent report
we're to tell the story in a clear, straigh
forward way we should find that Mrs. Nc
Cormick, whose family is a widow and
resides on adjoining farms, eloped with a
wealthy horse belonging to William Cook
Who having given the girl thraShing, sent
her TO military school. aud then, driven
frantic BY his wrongs, tried. to mulct Jones
with an axe. when the boy interfered and
but after all, this is not much clearer than
he original story, and on the whole. the
urther consideration Of the matter had bet
ter be postponed until cooler weather.