Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-04-22
BRIGHT BITS.

a NEW YORK man has shot himself because
he couldn't sleep. He should have shot the
cat.-B0stOn Post.
A RECENT writer on natural history says
that the giraffe has tongue seventeen inches
long. Good gracious, how the women mus
envy him .-Burttngton Free Press.
THE picnic season is upon Us, and the great
est ambition of the average young man is tC
have some one invent pair Of pants the colol
Of custard pie.-OH city BtissGrd.
BISMARCK to Uncle sam: Thunder anC
bitten III send your pigs and resolutions tC
the right apOut. / am hog enough for all Y ar
many meinsef. ! dinks 50 some.-Tbe JUdge
RENESYI the violinist, speaks English, ''ai
she is spoke" To friend who COMMUNICATED
him on his performance of a certain piece, ht
said. YES, you bet do got dat piece played
up like brick, and don't you forget it."
BETS are offered that when the North Pole
- reached an American newspaper reporter
viii be found there with an elaborate descrip-
tiOn of the place already written up, waiting
to take the first boat for hOme.-NOrristO1CH
Herald.
He kicked a shabby dicelet
That lay upon the iceet,
Not knowing there was hidden there a brick
brick. brick:
Then I knew he was a hummer
Or bad Chicago drummer
The adjectves he used so very quick, quick,
quick. -HOnkers Statesman.
PENsIvR BEAUTY IN MEXICO: | saw a aut-
tering gang of convicts go up the street to
work, led by a soldier with a revolver in his
hand and followed closely by two more. Their
clothing was of all degrees Of picturesque
patchwork, but one ragged pair Of yellOwish
trousers seated with blue in the form Of a
heart, and worn with jaunty grace, gave an
air of pensive beauty to the entire outfit
Boston Herald.
PERSONS sometimes get answers they don't
expect, even from children. One Of them was
questioning a Sunday school class about the
man who fell among thieves on the way from
Jerusalem to Jericho. Bringing the story to
a point, he asked: ''Now. why did the priest
and the Leyite pass by on the other side?" A
scholar held out his hand. '.Wel, my boy,
why did the priest pass by on the Otner side:''
Il know" said the lad; ''because the man was
already robbed. '-CAristidn at Work.
FRANK JAMES is developing such angelic
qualities that tits regarded uncertain whether
he will teach a kindergarten or take charge
Of the wOmen's prayer meeting when he
comes out OF jail. IL does seem pity to keep
such good man in Jail. But he seems to have
acquired all this goodness in prison, so per-
haps it would be just well to keep him
there, growing gooder and gooder all the time,
until at last, too good for this wicked old
world, he ascends to heaven by the famous
rope line.-Haokeve Dots
You've seen creeturs sudding lame,
Git too near 'em an'-they're game!
Her right over; an inch too near
Up and of is Nancy dear.
''Ges, Jake" says she,
Laws sakes." says she.
jest accordin' TO her fancy;
That's it perzactly, that's my Nancy.
o, a gals a cunnin' thing
You must take 'em on the wing
III be gOin'; for, We see,
Nancy, she's eXpectin' me.
I'll hit or miss her,
It's quits or kiss her;
I'm for facts, while she's for fancy;
That's US dizactly-me and Nancy.
Tile Manhattan.