Morning journal and courier., 1884-11-12
SWALLOWS.

Although one swallow does not make a summer, it only takes about six big ones to make fall.-Boston Post.
 On the bouleward EI am just off for Tonquin; I mean to settle there. Goodbye, old man, you probably will never see me again" ''Then, could you lend me $10?"- Le Figaro.
 It is said that the grasshopper has propor- tionally 120 times the kicking power of 8 man. Nature evidently did not intend to have grasshoppers sleep two abed.-Burling- ton Free Press.
 In mentioning the fact that Canadian lady has been made the happy mother of twins for the third time in five years, the Philadelphia Record remarks: E'Let those laugh that twin"
 ssYes,'' said Mrs. Firegi1l, t'everybody thinks my new furniture is splendid It is of the Louis Carthorse pattern, you know. Funny name, MT. F. says, but I think it's vulgar "-Boston Transcript.
 A notice was printed in one of our city pa pers few days ago announcing the finding of cheese on the street. It seems to us that the grocer was extremely careless in allowing the cheese to wander off by itself and get 1ost.-Boston Post.
 Alaska bears are said to be very ferocious this year and are devouring large numbers of natives. This will make them so fat and
  price next year. It takes brains to forecast the markets.-Philadelphia Call.
 A little girl who was sent to drive home the COW fell and was severely scratched and bruised On returning home she was asked if she cried when she fell. Why, no," she replied ''What would have been the use9 There was nobody to hear me-"
 A Michigan fisherman recently hooked 8 pickerel that was found to contain ten lr,o of nd nf haas If anybody wants to nail this lie we will fur nish the spike Our arm is tired so that we can't do it-Burlington Free Press.
 Food for Refection.-Mr. Societe-'I have just learned of your sisters engagement and congratulated her. I really wonder, courage to speak to your father" Miss Un- plucked Flower-'fWhy so, MT. Societe" Mr. S.-''Why, your father has always seemed.to me so distant-a man difficult to approach" Miss U. F. (with animation)- sF0h, not at all, MT. Societe. Get that idea out of your mind, beg of you, as soon as possible. ."-Harper's Bazaar.
 They are telling this story in Washington about youthful German diplomat and 8 bright young American woman with whom he was conversing at reception, in the tongue of his native land. "Why," said she. 'tdon't you speak English" 'Oh," said he with much dignity, ''I cannot think of speak ing it here learned the accent in London" There was moments silence, broken by the Teutonic declaration: "But speak French, also. Do you?" "Oh, yes" said the young lady, 'Ebut couldn't think of using it to @ German. learned the accent in Paris"
 Mrs. Parvenu had been abroad, and when she returned she had much to tell. One day a lady was talking to her. "Ah, my dear Mrs. Parvenu, did you go into Italy" ''Oh, yes,' was the reply, i've were all over it and saw everything" tfDid you visit the Vati- erupting fearful that day, throwing up lava and smoke and stuff, and they concluded it would not be safe to go up to the top. It was a fine spectacle from the conservatory of the hotel, and enjoyed it quite as much as if I had been right on the spot. ."-Merchant Traveller.