Smyrna times., 1884-01-23
Littleton Coke VS.. Clara Fitzpoodle.
hi The BAH D OF TOWER HALL.

CHAPTER VII.
To the hotel they went-snd got something to
The dinner was fnished-the meal was complete
For weeE and I'm thinking that now shall
A retreat for IN ysel1 and my own happy bride,
And return 10 the city with my vile Dy my Slue.
have bad feeling IN hear! ana IN. IN mead ,,.,
And say, in a whisper. of him 1t may please /
TO be eaten by midges and worried by teas,
If with watering places he haps TO be smltten,
And will BY 0SGuitOes and. Landlords, be bitten ,
If his chest is contracted, and he can initiate
His lungs in a chamber of seven by eight;
If a good natured fellow, he really don't care
If bed bugs gymnastic climb up on his hair;
IT. when proving his own mathematics defective |
He swears not when finding his bill, in peTspec- |
Twice what he expected-some mathematician
Having prscticed the landlord in double position,
II the man is all this, and then really he thinks
That cltpping and bleeding are good for his
health.
And hopes that the mineral water he drinks
May atone for the loss of his mineral wealth.
Let him go to the Springs, 10 the Fails OF the
Capes;
"If reasons my conduct hereafter should ShsPe'
With famous resorts I'll have nothing 10 40.
A cruSty old fellow was there with his WE
Who said he intended TO finish the season, -.
And wished he might stay there the rest OF his
A score of fsir-visitors asked for his reason;
He looked up 90 see if his wife was IN view
Then answered: The Falls of Niagara tum-
bling. A.-.,,s
Have drowned with their thunder the voice of
And silenccd a woman eternally grumbling.
It was only the Monday before we came mere
had losg on horSe-race some hundreds OF
Next morning. at breakfast, she said to me:
Can YOU give me an eagle to buy me some col
1 made no reply. but looked black as December;
Took out of my pocket volume and there
/ read her the poem called Nothing TO Wear
But here comes my wife, she who wanted the COL
Iwiii ask her the question, and she will de-
The emotions she felt when She asked for ten dol
And read her the poem called Nothing to
i felt" Sic replied. had you stayed from the
At home with your wife, in your own proper
Had YOU not set the law and the gospel aside.
BY betting your money ana leaving your
Had you SQuandered no money for NlCe OF chaIh-
Which. proftng nothing. was worse than in
Had YOU not your own pockets most sadly abused;
Through friends you had treated cigars you nau
Had You You not disappointed. returned from the
With chill in your heart and cloud on your
Had You feeling spite not have vented the
same 49,,
On your wife for your losses in no way to blame .
Had you not TO your manhood been guilty OF
With no show of defense in the province of rea-
I might. with some profit, have listened when
You read me the poem Of Nothing TO wear
As it was you had sluandered some hunoreus
away.
And denied me t.iIe: felt il was true
That whatever you read, or whate er you might
In nrGctice YOUR precepts had nothing TO do.
The husband thus scored by the unruly member,
And spurred by the laughter then shaking the
Pnt on an expression as black as December
And left in hurry 20 look al the Fails.
TO be c0ntinued.)
NorE-The chap above alluded TO afterwards
visited PHILADELPHIA and. of course, called al
Tower Hail. but alas. he could not be sulted
The moment he entered the store, the nap on Al
The clothes stood up, and no careSsing WouIc
smooth H. The Vests seemed to be tHreSted wltf
contempt and the Pants pGating ior Ievenge iGl,
while all the garments so slreLed win lnolgnatiOi
towards the man who had ill-used his Wlle, Una
nothing in the store was small enough for him
The truth is we make our Clothing Tor an anna
BILE class of customers. and the styles OF oui
Goats will not allow man to get his back up Il
quarrel with his wife For this reason, those VIII
live happy at home are those who patronze
TOWER HALL, may 24-l!
SIS and $40 Market Street, philadelphia
GARITEE, MASTEN & ALLEN.