The Southern herald., 1884-09-20
An Arkansas Opinion.
TROUBLE CAUSED BYA lExIOAE DlsI

lhllhAA CAUSED 81 AEAllAA AleEl- I
ArkansaW Traveller; some time ago
Col. Mnlbank visited Mexico, and, upon
returning, declared that the Mezieans
are the only people in the world who
know how to cook. "Why,' said be to
his wife, "their dish Of 'cheely' is ex-
cellent. You take a handful Of bird
peppers, mix in a little meal and stew
'em up. OF course it's hot, and espeei-
ally with a stranger, seems to be COM
posed of three parts fire and one part
torment, but after a man gets used to it,
why there's nothing that has such a ten
deney to promote digestion. HundOubt-
edly prolongs life, keeps the mind active
and tends toward a general promotion Of
good feeling. I have brought home a
sack of those peppers, and at every meal
after this shall expect my fayorite
dish"
Bird peppers entered into the Colo.
nel's daily diet. Noone thought of shar.
ing the dish with him until several days
ago, when old Uncle Sam Blackamore,
of Red Fork township, came to the city
and called at the Colonel's house. The
old man, while at dinner, noticed the
host dipping into what appeared to be
cooked tomatoes. The old gentleman is
fond of cooked tomatoes, and, during an
animated discussion in to which the sub
ject of literal place of torment in the
world to come entered strongly, hereaeh-
ed over and helpedhimself to a spoonful
of stewed pepper.
"Now," said the old fellow, lifting a
good-sized blaze on the point of his knife
and holding it near his mouth until he
should reach semicolon, "I am little
quar- in my belief, and don't hesitate to
say that the wicked will be roasted like
a 'possom-"
| He dropped the knife, wiped his tongue
on his cOat-sleeve, and without speak
ing, he "hauled OFF, with q sauce bottle
and knocked the Colonel down. The
Colonel, being resentful and impetuous,
arose and discouraged old Blackamore' e's
familiarity by hurting his favorite dish
into the visitors frank and open counte-
nance. A hand-to-hand encounter en-
sued, resulting in the defeat of the Col
onel and the subsequent arrest of the
old man. The case was taken to court
and tried by an eminent Justice Of the
Peace, a jurist whose idea of justice
rarely meets with reversal, except when
it chances to fall under the severe gaze
, Of Judge who knows the law.
When the lawyers had closed theil
{ arguments, the old Justice killed {
E horsefy with paper-cutter, and said
Q "This Court is ready to deliver it
a opinion. The Court holds that the de
+, fendant had a right to visit the land o
the Montezumas and Cortezes, and tina
1 while there had perfect right to form
a taste for the dishes prepared by tn,
+, inhabitants Of that country. This Cour
] furthermore holds that the defendan
had perfect right to prepare the disl
e and eat it under the American flag; il
/ other words, he had a right to put it OF
q his table"
f "Then 1 understand, " said the lawyel
for the plaintiff, 'that you have decided
! in our favor?"
"Just wait, if you please, until thii
court has concluded the decision. Ii
order to be thoroughly.prepared to judg'
> the case wisely, this Court ordered anC
tasted sample of the stuff brought from
the depraved land of the Montezumas
and this Court is prepared to say that (
: man who wouldn't knock fellow dowI
for placing such hidden mine of ex
! plosive compounds within his reach
ought to break out with the nettle.rasl
l and be deprived of the right of suffrage
This Court would advise the plaintiff t,
|, keep out of the defendants way, bu
. will say that if the defendant don't catcl
him and maui the eternal pizen out of hi
!, disposition, he will lay himself liable t,
, a fine and the odium Of being consider'
a blamed fool by this Court"
An Ingenious Girl.
\ A Southern girl, in the Boston Watch