davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02
HUMOROUS.

"A happy medium" who
makes money in the clairvoyant bust
ness.--Ihe DIAL
-" An that the pillar of Hercules?"
she said, adjusting her silver spectacles
Gracious. what's the rest of his bed
clothes like, | wonder?"
1t is n sir-prize the girls are after
this year. But the men are growing
cautious and are not to be m ss-taken
thus easily.--IndianapoliS Scissors.
Ladies are said to e working their
way into the watch business, because
they produce handsomer faces and
more delicate hands than men.--N. y.
Ledger.
"A young and brieHess lawyer who
calls upon his lady acquaintance good
deal in the evenings, deceives his father
with the story that he had great deal
of court practice Y. Commercial
advertiser.
James, who was trying to sew a
new button on his coat, murmured
"They say there's 4 new va, mt that
makes fifteen miles an hour, but this
thread makes twenty knots minute -
-Franktord Herald.
"A lady in Toronto got to laughing
so hard o. er some amusing incident that
she couldn't stop. Finally doctor was
called in, and he couldn't quiet her.
As last resort some one had to tel
her that her back hair was coming
down.-LOUeH Citizen.
An engaged couple having appeared
several times before a clergyman TO ge;
married, who ON each occasion declined
to perform the ceremony because the
groom was invariably drunk, at last
reproved the girl for bringing her lover
before him in such condition. where.
upon she burst into tears and said
But, sir, he won't come when he's
sobern' -ETchdnQe.
-"Waitaw, will WEAKLY have 10 we.
move to anOthaw table. There appeaws
to be a terwible dwaft heaw" '.Tain'l
no draft heah. no how, Mr.. La Dude.
Dab amt no win tall 'cept what dat
yer lady am maxim wild her fan. "
Jaw, that's it. / knew there was a
dwaft. 1t nearly blew me away.
WEAKLY, now. couldn't you ask her 10
stop?'- Chicago Herald.
Ills there dude club i'm this city?''
asked stranger, entering the editorial
room. There is, returned the editor,
as he produced n toothpick from his
pocket and laid it on the roll top desk;
'1hat's it, and the first dude that shows
his head in this office will be Drained
with it," With deep sigh the
stranger turned and disappeared
S0mcrCitte Journal
SISTER" said little boy, rushing
into the parlor, where she was enter
PERTAINING young Mr.. Smith. Twill you
come into the hall a minute? | want
to speak to you" 81 can not now.
dear. Don't you see that am engaged
with Mr.. Smith? What is it you want"
Jimmy White is ont in the hall. and
he says he won't believe it unless YOU
tell him so yourself" What is it that
Jimmy White won't believe, dear?''
asked the sister. swcetly. THAT you
ate thirty-five pancakes this morning
for breakfast. - Philadelphia Call
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02
A Fine PAPER.

The boy had lust brought some pa
pers to the editorial room fresh from
the press, and the forse were engaged
in commenting on the issue.
Good paper to-day. gentlemen" re-
marked the editor. THAT leader of
mine, if am not very much mistaken,
will cause sensation among"
1T IS n good paper broke in the
funny man, who had been looking over
his column for typographical errors.
II haven't very..much:: matter in, but if
do say it myself, every line of it is
bright, even for me, and will be copied
ar and"
"A good deal of local matter is cut
on" interru. ted the city editor, "but
what there is is frst-class news. That
cock-fight, / know, will be published ex-
uusively by us. and think the runaway
accident
''Well, gentlemen" said the proprie-
tor of the establishment, entering the
room. .'hne paper to-day. There not
mu in it but advertisements. but
that's what pays. - Philadelphia Cal
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02
A CeylOnese Night.

There is no twilight i'm Ceylon. When
the sun sets darkness falls suddenly up
on the earth and the stars shine out as
if some hand had turned on the star
light. And it is thick darkness, too, SO
thick that an anthropological specula-
ton is born in my mind that the dark
complexion of these people is due to q
primitive natural selection of the night
like. A Singhalese man is invisible
against the night and the tread of his
bare feet is inaudible. That is a fair
defense against many foes. The lighter,
more visible varieties of their race
would be killed off by invaders and
the night would be passed by. In addi-
ton to this the predatory class would
be successful in the proportion that, as
is said In the Book of Job. they We're
masked by tie night. The Colombo
coachman will not drive step after six
o'clock unless his lamps be lit, lest he
should run over slumbering native.
The darkness lends special beauty
to the bungalows of the rich. which APP
pear illuminated. the rays from their
lamps shining through the foliage in a
mystical way-esPecially If they be
cocoaput-ol lamps. which give dim.
religious light The most palatial
bungalow IN Colombo. should say. is
that of Muta Cumara Swamy. whose hos
pitaiity aud that of his brothers was ex-
tended to me in consideration of my
friendship for their uncle, the late Sir
Cumara Swamy. As I drove up last
evening through the large park of
rslms radiant with hre-fiies. the
bungalow looked like a fairy palace in
t distance. but when I arrived and
entered it was fairy palace. Ceyton
Cor, .Sass francisco Chronicle,
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02
Our Young Readers.
THOSE MERRY sUNBEAMs


Oh, what shall we DO for the Lovely,
This rainy, rainy day1
OH how shall we make tn baby laugh,
When everythings uii and grayf
The sun has gone on a picnic,
The moon has gone to bed.
The tiresome sky does nothing but cry,
As If its best friend were dead.
Come hither, come hither. my Sunboams!
Come one, and two. and three;
And now In q trice we'll have the room
As sunny as sunny can be.
Come. dimpling. dimpling dumping.
Come, Rosy. Posie, Rose.
Come lit boy Billy a-toddling round
On little fat tottering toes.
Now twinkle, now twinkle. my Sunbeams!
Now twinkle. and laugh, and dance.
And brush me the gloom straight out OF the
Nor leave 1t the ghost OF q chance.
All! see che Lovely smile now!
ALL see her jump and crowi
AS round and round, with laugh and dance,
Ny three merry Sunbeams 60.
And who cares now for the raind rops?
Who cares for the gloomy day2
When each little heart Is doing Its part
To make us all glad and gay
You moon. you may stay in bed now:
You sun. you may wander and roam;
And CRY away, cry, you tireeome sky!
We've plenty Of sunshine at home!
Il. r. Richards. IN fouth's Companion.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02
A Leap.Year Episode.

Society, as o sort of Jest, has decreed
that any young man who refuses leap
year proposal from q lady is in honor
bound to present her with q silk dress.
There are o number of old maids In
town who have already accumulated
enough silk dresses to stock dry. goods
warehouse. But that Is not what / de-
sire to say. One day last week a Young
man In society here paid visit to
young lady friend. They were not en-
gagged. but be had given ample evidence
that he would like TO be II he could only
muster up sufficient confidence.
He had been fooling along on the
outside edges Of an engagement for six
months or more, and the lady began to
grow anxious. IL was one of those
cases where both parties houndered
around in the sweet meshes of love,
without svsr coming to an open under.
standing. On the evening in quaatiou
the lady, half in iest and wholly in ear
pest, proposed to him. He said that
silks were unusually high-priced. and
that II she would be married at once he
would accept. Much to his ssrprise
she did accept, and the couple visited
the parsonage of . ne ghboring clergy
man, where the bride produced the Ii
cense, showing that her determination
was not a sudden freak of fancy, and
the pair were made man and wife,
HjlodslphSa Gall
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

Tho handsomest black wool dresses
aAye the basque and drapery OF Henriet-
ta cloth, with q soft vest and plated
kilt of striped black and white gros-
grain, or stripes of black satin or of vel
vet on ecru gros-grain, or else checked
black and white silk on which are raised
black velvet figures. French lace in
many full frills is the trimming. More
dressy black toilets to be worn through
out the summer have black China Grape
with embroidered figures for the basque
Or princesse over-dress, while the skirt
may be of alternate breadths Of this
Grape and of Escurial net, or else it may
be of black satin covered entirely by
TWO or three deep fiounces of lace. either
Chantilly or French limitations thereof,
or the rich Escurial laces. Ecru laces
and the jetted nets are also used for
such dresses. Lace dresses, rs they are
n led. will lie the summer fancy for
black DIR. sses, and are already worn in
the house: these have three wide
hounces of real or of imitation thread
lace around the satin surah skirt, a
deeply draped apron. which may be
made of lace shawl, and basque
made of piece lace laid over satin. The
| novelty, however. in such lace dresses
s suggestions of the full round gathered
skirts which it is predicted will at no
distant day be restored 10 favor. These
| full skirts are made up over a closely
gored skirt of black silk, which Is bor-
dered at the foot with soft dropping
puff of satin. On such . skirt imagine
| five full breadths, three of Escurial lace
and two of embroidered China Grape,
shirred at the top, not gored, and falling
full on the sides and back, while the
Hat front breadth il covered with cross
wise RULES of Escurial lace in which let
tasse's droop. At the to- of the front
is verE short wrinkled apron of the
China Grape, and the basque, of the
same Grape. has some draperg at the
back. The mantle Tor this dress has
the back and fronts of Grape. with the
high-shOuldered sides OF Escurial net;
lace and jets are the trimming; the
small bonnet is of the same material,
and the gloves are reddish tan-color.
Black grOS-grains are made up with an
over-dress that has the basque front
sloped to long peplum-pointeI sides,
while the back is in prircesse shape.
Black velvet ribbon. beginning in the
under-arm seam, is ted on the front in
| punt. anu lhc pCpluIh SnlS nave cstcu
large passementerie ornament, or
else ribbon loops and floating ends.
The front and sides of the skirt are
covered by deep, sharply-pointeda apron
that has five wide folds turned upward
aero IS it. and On each fold is laid row
of embroidery or of lace. For 4 black
satin skirt that is covered by two very
deep llama lace flounces held down each
side 10y rosettes of black satin ribbon,
the has Iue front ard princesse back are
made Of black embroidered China
Grape, with satin vest, and the new
feature of this is cutting away the
basque beside the vest. and sewing q
wide lace flounce on each side of it to
droop carelessly on the satin vest from
the throat down. and fall in drapery on
the hips. -HaIpcr'S Bd.ar.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

Bmilea and tears are common things.
Hearts That throb like nuttenng wlnRa
Sudden blushee. causelesa siRhA
Tender KianCcs OF bright eyes.
Yicldtuga 70 the least demands
Whispers soft ard touch OF hands
Grief when timo awhile divides
Nay mean lOvo-or aught besidcA
These may come and these may 20,
Though Of love yOu never know,
Though loves tone have these, alone
love has attributes its Own.
That can ever dearer make
Ito but tor The othors axe
That can wolooIne death a. eveNa
When 'us life east AZ loves feet.
Love unites, a. when the sun
Mella twO cloudieta into one;
wishes 70 one contcr tend:
Hopes and fears and fancics blenA
Ae two melodies combine,
FORMING harmony divine;
AetwO rivers, a0ul with soul
Joins ~ mako tho perfect whole.
-CcOTVc budseRc, ~ bcmOTcsts konthD.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02
THE HAPPY WOMAN.

God did not give me palace.
Nor fioh rod wine aud SILK; D.
But ne gaFg me a cottage % peace,
And the white wheat loaf and milk
God did not give mo n golden crown,
Nor the potnD 81 courtiy hfe:
Bni We gave INC the Eol en- ring OF love
The ring of a happy vile.
Tie eont me 20 work In the household.
To CLEAN In the narveet-neld,
To gather the 1utter aud honey,
And ne wealth ~ tho otc lard yield:
To he out M the wind and sunshine,
TosslnE the scented hay:
To IL up aud feeding the workers
a. tho breaking OF the day.
He gives mo tho hire of my labor.
The WACO that love the best
The love OF loyal husband.
The babes az my knee and breast
share the hope OF the sower,
know when the roses blow;
Mine 10 the Joy OF the harvest,
And the winters IRE and snow.
God Eiveth 70 some . palace. A
And rich red wine and silk;
nut God gave me = cottage OF peace,
Aud the white wheat loaf and milk.
God Iiveth 70 snmo q golden crown.
AND tho pomp OF cOurtly lifs.
but Coz gave me Loves golden ring.
And The Ioy OF mothsr and wife.
And, oh, lam fun oontsnt
Filling my own little place;
Dong ia everyday dulles
With q smiling. cheerful grace.
You cou.d not nnd n happier soul.
~ over the WOr you d range:
There IL not Queen I envy
A woman with whom ia change
-LItk n hdrr, "a " 4. Lod0sr.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

"A Philadelphia sent postal card
to his sister in Canada on which he hod
written GA words. She answered with
IA words. Not to be- outdone he
crowded in 1,00S, which brought an
answer with 1.527 words spelled out in
full and written plain enough TO be
easily read by persons of ordinary sight.
DE thinks he will send her q new spring
bonnet and call it square. Philadelphia
Press.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

"A little boy in one Of the CITY Ger
man schools, while engage in the de-
hghtful exercise of defining words. a
few weeks ago, made q mistake. He
said; "A demagogue is . vessel that
holds beer, wine. gin. whisky or any
other intoxicating hquor." He was
probably thinking of demijohn but he
bit the truth just the same.-Boston
toSt
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

The London Lancet does not APP
prove OF children's parties, and thinks
tnat not only in winter. but at all sea-
sons. the Amusemeuts of young child. en-
should be sim le. unexciting and as
free As possible from the characteristics
OF the pleasures of later ears.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

"A patent-medicine man adyertises
that. beginning lie upon nothing, ne
attained such pitch OF prosperity that
he wore velvet robes with diamond but
tons, and stood before kingS-M Y
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

1t is well to remember that death
turks around the wire of an cleo. rio
light. The more you don't touch them
the better CAieG0e IRter UcsoA
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1884-05-02

AT the last town meeting at Hop
kinstou, N. H.. DeaconWeeks and Dea-
con Currier cast their sixty-Irst and
sixteth annual ballots, --Rostou Post.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-03-24

out Of bond in the course Of time. to which Mr.
Thompson replied that it would pass into con
sumption when it was called ont by some of the
temperance cranks, for he mad never seen one of
that class who, before making a speech. would
not step behind the door and wet his whistle.
Mr.. Clements opposed the bill.
Mr.. Breckenridge favored it. He made an eX-
haustive speech, in which he went into the his
tory OF the legislation affecting the whisky in
dustry. described the hardships under which that
interest now suffered, and maintained the equity
and justice of the government stepping in and
saving it from utter bankruptcy. His speech re
celyed IA good deal of attention from his party as
~sociates.
Mr.. York expressed a desire to see the entire
Internal revenue system wiped out.
Mr.. Hiscock opposed the bill,
Mr.. Ray, of New York, opposed turning the
nation into a great whisky storehouse, declaring
that the bill asked the government to become the
wet nurse of the big baby whisky interest.
Mr.. Cutcheon said the question was a triangu-
lar one. He considered it from it's business,
revenue and moral aspects. He had expected
some one to say the question was unconstitu-
tional legislation. Making an appropriation for
the flood sufferers had been pronounced uncon-
situtiOnal. 1t is unconstitutional he said, to
save men from being drowned in the water, and
constitutional to save men from being drowned
in whisky.
Mr.. Hepburn opposed the bill and made an
onslaught upon the achievements which the
whisky interests had performed. declaring it had
kept in the field not the armies of the Union, as
has been alleged, but armies of paupers, crime
and drunkenness.
Mr.. Findlay said if the bill passed. whisky
would be made cheap-as cheap, perhaps, as gin
was once in London. when advertisements were
displayed asserting that "a man can get drunk
here for a penny-dead drunk for two pence"
Before the conclusion of Mr.. Findlay's speech
the committee rose.
Mr.. Hancock, from the committee on appro-
priations, reported the pension appropriation
bill. Committee of the whole.
Mr.. Beach offered a resolution calling on the
Secretary of the Interior for copies of all leases
made by him for the use or occupation of any
ground in the Yellowstone National Park, and
also information as to whether the lessees had
complied with the conditions of the lease, and as
to the provisions made TO prevent the wanton
destruction of fish and game in the park.
Adopted
Adjourned
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-03-24

Tseng, the Chinese ambassador, has been or
dered to return to Paris.
The Swiss Federal Council has decided to expel
four German Anarchists from the country.
Tive embassies and one legation have protest
ed against police -visitations to the domiciles of
foreigners at Constantinople.
Mr.. Algernon Swinburne, the poet, has writ
ten a long comparison of Wordsworth and Byron
for the Nineteenth Century.
Mile. Theo, who is now singing in Nice, has
signed an agreement with Mr.. Maurice Grau for
an Engagement in the United States.
Miss Van Zandt. the American prima donna,
who has long been a favOrite in Paris. has signed
a contract for an engagement next winter in Rus
STA.
Spanish military officers and several other
persons suspected of completely in the attempt
to bring about a revolution in Spain have been
arrested by the Portuguese police.
Greece is tanning the excitement IN Crete,
and party feeling is running high. The British
consul at Gambia has refused to receive a memo
rial submitted by the Mussulmans of the island
against Photiadas Pasha being governor. The
memorialists oppose him because he is a Chris
tian.
Labouchere is somewhat curious to know what
reward will be given to General Graham for his
victory at Teb. According to the precedent of
Tel-elKebir," says Labouchere, The ought, at
the very least, be made a duke, with a pension
of EGO, 900 pounds a year 1t is true that he had
not so many men under his command as Lord
Wolseley, but the foes he encountered were
much more formidable"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-03-24
The Flood in che Lower Mississippi.

New ORLEANS, March 2;.-The Picayune's
Baton Rouge special says: Since daylight this
morning it has rained continuously. The river
is now at high-water mark of 1882 Mulatto
Point crevasse has been abandoned, and no fur
Their effort will be made 10 close the opening.
The force at that point will be distributed to
adjacent weak or threatened points. West
Baton Rouge suffers to the extent Of several
hundred thousand dollars. There is much un-
rain, doubtless. will continue during the night,
and the river will surely advance several inches.
The general impression is that there will be
trouble in this neighborhood within the next
twenty-four hours. General complaint is made
that pilots run their boats too near shore, caus
ing damage to the levees. The break at Mu-
latto Point is now two hundred feet wide and
fully twelve feet deep. Medina levee is reported
gone.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-03-24
THE WEEK IN CONGRESS.
Measures To Be Acted Upon in the Two
Houses.

Measures To BE Acted Upon in the Two
Houses.
WASHINGTON, March 23.-In the House of
Representatives tomorrow is set apart for Dis
trict of Columbia business. The District commit
tee, however, will have nothing of general inter
est to bring forward. Should the minor matters
it offers be disposed of early in the day, discus
sion on the bonded whisky bill will be continued.
The friends of this measure expect to reach a
vote on Tuesday. On the evening of that day
the Democratic caucus on the tariff question
will be held. The Indian and pension appropria-
ton bills have been reported by the appropria-
tons committee, and either of them may be
taken up in the House after Tuesday.
Privileged matters have occupied the greater
part of the present session in the House, and the
advocates of legislation on special sub
iects express themselves as appre-
hensive that the remainder of the session will be
occupiedin the samem manner. in the consideration
of the appropriation bills and revenue measures.
The appropriations committee has a number of
bills in advanced stages of preparation which can
be reported on short notice. The sundry civil
and legislative, executive and judicial appropri-
alton bills, two of the m ost important measures,
are almost completed.
Mr.. Blair's educational bin is the unfinished
business in the Senate and neither its friends
nor its opponents are willing to make predictions
as to it's fate or the time which will be required
to dispose of it. Senator Blair is still hopeful
that it will pass.
An attempt to set aside for consideration the
pleuro-pneumonia bill and another to send it back
to the committee for revision, which, if success
full, will be equivelant to its defeat for the
present session, will probably be made on Mon
day, or, if the bill be not earlier discussed, on
Tuesday. There seems to be a majority in favor
of some kind of a national educa tional
bill, and it is among the possibilities
that the friends of Mr.. Blair's bill may accept
amendments smoothing away the features which
are Objectionable to some senators, and thus Sc
cure the passage of the measure. which will at
least recognize as a general principle that the
government has a duty to perform in connection
with the education of freedmen, hoping to &C
complish more at a future Congress, should the
fruits Of the first measure be satisfactory.
The bankruptcy bill, pleuro-pneumonia bill,
and bill to regulate the practice in patent suits.
still stand as special orders on the calendar, and
will require more time for consideration than
that portion of the week remaining after the
educational bill is disposed of.
The appropriations committee has under con
sideration the naval and ~postoffice appropriation
bills, but it is not thought probable either will be
reported in time for action by the Senate this
week.