Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1884-07-23

at the residence of w. w. Engle was a
success, Notwithstanding the threatening
attitude of the elements without. The
lawn was brilliantly lighted with Chinese
lanterns and kerosene torches. After the
usual promiscuous sociabilities, ice cream
and cake were served. After supper the
pastor, Rev. E. D. Robertson, acting
POSTMASTER, called upon::Mr. J. Cressey
to. respond to the toast, ''The West"
Mr.. Cressey said that his father was a
Methodist minister, hence he himself
ought to be a good impromptu speaker.
Such a social gathering as this was
rare thing in the west; the numerical
ratio OF gentlemen to ladies out there was
as 5 to 1, thence each of the four took his
turn in entertaining the one lady. This
complexion of society was fast changing
for the better out west and he hoped
emigration would soon change the ratio
mentioned above. DR.. Phillips next
responded to the toast Music" He said
on such short notice he could give only'a
short response. Music was usually di-
vided into the departments of rhythmics,
melodies and dynamics. These are aptly
illustrated in that midnight concert which
wakes up papa and mama suddenly,
causing. them to fly about in search of
hot griddles and pancakes to subdue the
singer. Here you can hear high pitch,
low pitch, diatonic and chromatic scales,
and with no rests in between. Then, too,
we are often Weakened up to hear that
familiar music on moonlight night-the
cat concert. Here, too, are all the de-
partments of music aptly illustrated,
especially dynamics, which means force;
notice the loud and soft, then fine, now
coarse voices of the high sopranos and
low bassos. Nere Mr.. Engle assisted the
description by pinching the tail of the
only feline specimen in the company
MIR. Crews next responded to the toast
"The Ladies'" He magnified the heroism
of women on the battle. field, binding up
the wounds and receiving the last mes
sages of the dying as above that of the
men in battle. Home and society would
be bereft of its cheerfulness and refine
ment were it not for the influence of
ladies, &c. Miss Darrah next toasted the
opposite sex. This subject, like gentlemen
themselves she thought, improved in flavor
with age. Since ''The boy is father of
the man, he required her first attention
Sfo 90 II 1>:n
definition of hunger: Hunger MAY be
located in the stomach, but it really is a
distress at large. AS the boy grows old
his appetite becomes concentrated upon
pie, cake, &c. 1t is said that women are
proverbially curious, but she thinks
Milton and the Bible to the contrary
that Adam must have stood by Eve as
she ate the apple, asking her such ques-
tions as these: How does it taste? Does
it make you sick yet? Let me trylt. The
gentleman is very generous, especially
from the age of twenty to that of mar
riage. Witness the caramels he buys for
sociables, the roller skates and carriage
rides he pays for 1t is not at all Won
derful if reaction sets in after this time
Gentlemen are not all Mark Twains, but
are nevertheless humorous as may be
seen in the vicinity of any grocery store
or Masonic lodge. AS compared with the
gentlemen of France and England the
American gentleman is. more genuinely
courteous and benevolent toward the
opposite sex, whose very weakness calls
forth his sympathy and protection in
whatever condition or place she may be;
no matter how disagrecable she may make
herself by the numerous unnecessary and
foolish questions she may ask railroad
conductor, she gets in return the Ameri-
can gentleman's patient and courteous
assistance.