Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1884-01-02

Dailp Kennfbrl 3ournal.
How to Treat a Guest.

Under the above head Harper's Bazaar
gives some advice and directions, which
though more applicable to fashionable
city and country house" hospitality, con-
tains some ''sound doctrine" for hostesses
in all ranks of life. The author says: !:
"A hostess should remember that when
she asks people to visit her, she has two
very important duties before her-one is,
not to neglect her guest; the other, not
to weary her friend with too much atten-
tion. Never give your guest the impress
sion that he is being entertained;' follow
the daily life of your household and of
your duties as you desire, seeing to it that
your guest is never in an unpleasant posi-
ton or neglected"
Very many guests are invited to n
friends house only to be made supreme
ly miserable during their stay; they have
to rise at unusual hours; eat when they
are not hungry and eat what they do not
like; drive or walk when they are not in
clined to do so, and give up their
leisure and their privacy for pleasures
which they do not care for" The ques-
toner may ask: "What do we invite peo-
pie for unless we wish to see themP We
do wish to see them part of the day. not
the whole day. No one can sit and talk
all day The lady of the house should
have the privilege of retiring to her room
for a nap. to write or read, and so should
the guest"
In fashionable society guest and hostess
often have different acquaintances and diff
ferent invitations the host and hostess
may go out to dinner; and the guest be
invited out and the entertainers remain
behind. In our ordinary society, this
would not be felt to be quite the proper
thing. especially if the lady of the house
were to leave her guest at home when she
went out. But certainly the hostess
should have no feeling at finding her
guest invited where she is not, and
should leave her at liberty to visit
friends with whom she Qhe hostess) is not
on speaking terms. Some women have
the idea that it is not good form for in
mates of their house to visit people with
whom they themselves are not intimate,
but the guest has a right to do so if she
pleases.
The guest should be allowed to enjoy
herself in her own way, not to be bound
down by her hostess programme, which
may not suit her tastes or inclination at all .
1t is tiresome work to try to find some
thing amusing or entertaining to talk about
all the time; the effort to entertain and be
entertained" tires both parties. and often
each heaves a sigh OF relief at the conclu-
sion of what might have been an enjoya-
BILE visit to both had not each kept on
company manners all the time.
The Bazaar goes on to note a few of the
obligations OF guest. one of which is that
she should disarrange the family habits as
little as possible. If she is going out
she should tell her hostess where, and ap-
prise her OF the hour of her return. She
should not be late if invited to drive. nor
should she make servant of the master of
the house by requesting him to do little
errapds for her. She should respect all
family customs, and carefully avoid all
disagreeable topics of conversation. A
well-bred guest makes no trouble in a
house she has an instinct to see that no
plan of her hostess is outraged by her be-
ing there.
In conclusion we are reminded that
there is no office in the world which should
be filled with such punctilous devotion,
prepriety and self respect as that of
hostess; and that if a lady ever allows her
guest to feel that she is trouble, or in the
way, she violates the first rule of hospital
ity.