New Ulm weekly review., 1884-06-11
Short Talks With the Boys.

tho age of Is without having several
times firmly resolved to leave home.
When . boy has made up his mind to .
thing Of this sort he ought to carry it
out By all means. The first step in tho
programme is to begin saving up bread
and meat When you have . bushel or
30 Of provisions hidden in the barn or
under the wood-shed you are ready for
the battle with the cold world. Make
your start at night. This will prevent
the sun from tanning your complexion,
and you will be quite certain of the
company Of tramp or two.
Some boys leave q note pinned to the
pillow Of their bed. This note goes on
to say that the boy has been jawed.
bulldozed, starved, pounded and
knocked down and dragged out. until
he has made up his mind to sever the
connection. He will never be heard Of
moro.
When you have packed up your little
bundle and are off it will be we'll to
settle upon some plan for the future.
Perhaps you want to be sailor? Moth
ing Is easier. Make your way to some
lake or seaport, and most any captain
will take you. II he can't disgust you
with the sailoring business in about q
week, tar buckets. sea-sickness, poor
provisions and q ropes end will be
called upon to assist him.
Perhaps y0u want to become q
mighty hunterp Mighty hunters are
not made in few days or weeks. You
want to begin BY letting your hair and
finger nails grow, sleeping in q swamp,
and wasting 81 worth Of ammunition
to kill ten-cent chipmunk.
II you have decided to become
bank clerk, we'll and good. Make
tracks for the nearest city, and the first
bank you enter viii jump at the chance
Of employing you at salary Of $500
per month. II it should SO happen
that the bank didn't do any jumping as
you made application, you can console
yourself with the reflection that it is
about to bust.
But, speaking in all seriousness, my
boy, II had dozen sons / should be
glad to have each and every one of
them take his turn at running away
from home. It is the best cure in the
world for that disease called s'swell-
head. " There's heap Of romance in
the idea OF running away. You think
Of the sparkling sea, the green prairies,
coral strands, robbers caves and pi-
rates treasures. You feel that you
know 30 much more than your father
that it is waste of brains for both Of
you to remain in the same house. You
have been forced to 70 to school, and
have been ordered tosplit wood and 60
to tho grocery after butter like COM
mon slave. Don't stand it any longer!
Pick up your duds and leave the house
and go forth into the world.
i What! Come to full stop In the
road before you are q mile away!
You've got peck or more of sour meat
and moldy bread In pillow-case, sew
enteen cents In your pocket and Just
think how your father and mother
have missed you at home! The ro-
nance begins to wear of. ehp You don't
care half as much about mermaids and
palm-groves and pirate ships ~ you
mother after al, and perhaps father
isn't 90 much to blame for bossing you
around. Come to think it all over.
perhaps you'd better return home and
try and stand 1t for . few more weeks.
All! my son, butwe've all been there!
All these wrinkled and dignifed and
bald-headed old men you meet on the
streets have had about the same expe-
rience. We've had that Same period
Of ''swen-head," !" and eight out Of ten Of
10 have packed our bundles and slid out
to escape parental tyranny. Eight out
Of ten Of Us have slipped back again,
too. and the experience was the right
sort Of medicine for the disease. Any
timo you come to feel that you afe q
poor, overworked and downtrodden
boy, and that II you only had fair
show you'd know more in minute
than your father does in an hour, Just
skip. There's nothing like it--M
Quad