St. Landry democrat., 1884-07-05
JoI,nny's Essay ON Dogs.

| The dog is a great Source Of national
wealth but the BuffaloWs is nearly ex-
tincted. The Dog is a domestic animal
like the Wolf and Fox but most dogs
won't stand it if you tramp on their tale
he is knockternal IN his habits but he
don't squeel like the Mules & pigs. We
have three dogs and Uncle Ben says all
aint worth a damp plug Of tobacco to
hiss. If you don't give dogs enough to
eat he becomes so avaricious that be
will attact Human people, and on ac-
count Of his great Fidelity to Man he is
called the King of Beasts. The dogs
are ruminating animal and if he had
horns he would chaw his quid. You can
know he is dreaming when he wants to
bark and can't git his mouth open, but
/ if something makes our dogs awake at
night Uncle Ben says they make sich a
Racket like if all the Hall was broke
loose. Dogs is a source of great Pleas
ure as the faithful Companion Of the
lonely traveller and when Our Watches
sees a peddler or somebody going apast
our house he lays. low till he gets past
then he sneaks up behind and bites his
legs-Every dog has bis day-Bill
Thompson says that's the Law and you
cant get over it and he says the Dog
Days was made SO every dog could have
their days all at once, our Teacher says
the dog belongs to the Wolf Family but
Uncle Ben he laughed, he said he
knowed better than that with his eye
shut, for be said he bets wolf would
be a doggoned nice Family Man. This
Faithful Animal Guards the house at
night while all the house is Raped in
Peace full slumber and Bill Thompson
he says it a dog has wool in his teeth
the next morning its a sign he feared
sheep that night. And a dog aint no
Beast of Pray, but our Teacher she says
that don't mean that he's worse than
other people for she says it don't mean
that kind of Pray-but the New Found
Land dog is the Ilayrest Of the whole
Lot who can swim more than week
before he Ascends to the surface to
Breathe, he is therefore called the Ship
Of the Desert. And Inglish Bulldog
is awful onery to look at-Uncle Ben he
says if a Inglish bulldog looks like that
he would like to see a Dutch one. Bill
Thompson he says they are called In
glish bulldogs because he says in In
gland the people use them for bait when
they want to ketch bulls and that kind
of ketching fish is called bullbaiting,
and Bill Thompson, he says if a full
bloody Inglish Bulldog ketches a Holt
of Steers nose he is so sagacious that
he won't let go even it you cut off one Of
your Hine legs. Dogs is like other
creatures and cant talk, but Bill
Thompson he says in Old times before
the war Dogs could talk Latin but now
no body can talk any more Dog Latin
except the professors in the Colleges.
The dogs is Up on the hole Cabinest
animals that ever was and Prof. Daisy
head made an address in our school he
said If he had knowed as much about
scientif Animals as us Boys he would
had show to be President too but he
said in them Dark Ages where he was
born boys had no show to be President
but 10 Simmings said he would sooner.
run Engine than be President because
killed him, bnt Bill Thompson
says Jo hasn't got back bones enough.
Our teacher she learnt to talk french at
Miss Krautschwanger's Boarded School
and she says il you want to make a dog
stand on his Hine legs in french and
make Bough, you just say O Reservoir
Mon Chair.