Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1884-02-13
Ward and Pere Bataman.

In 1866, when Miss Kate Bateman
was playing an engagement in Phil
adelphia, there occurred a very anus
ing encounter between Charley Brown
(Artemus Ward) and "Pa" Bateman, as
he was Familiarity known, the father of
Kate.
Mr.. Bateman was, as he certainly had
good reason to be, excessively proud Of
the histrionic talent of his daughter,
and it was on the day following one of
her greatest triumphs that he first met
Artemus Ward, that irrepressible wag
being introduced to him by Mr.. Frank
Drew, the actor, as plain "Mr. Brown"
"And you are the father of the great
est actress the world has ever SEEN"
Mr.. Bateman gave unmistakabIe ev-
idence of his entire belief in and proud
consciousness OF the fact.
'Parden me, sir" said Ward, in a
voice full of emotion, as he seized Mr..
Bateman's hand in a vigorous clasp,
"will you permit me, sir, to shake hands
with you again"
Mr.. Bateman was much affected by
this hearty Endorsement.
"And now," continued Ward, "H
might be so bold as to offer a sugges-
ton, permit me to say that, were I the
father of such child, but that could
not be. Permit me, I beg" impulsive-
~, and clutching wildly at Mr.. Bate
mans arm, permit me once more to
shake hands with the father of Kate
Bateman."
This ceremony performed, Ward re-
sumed:
Il was about to say, Mr.. Bateman,
that you are too modest in the intro
duction of your daughter to the public
notice-too modest by far"
A gesture of impotence from peTe
was apparently unnoticed by Artemus,
who continued:
while you probably have some con-
ception of the great gifts with which
your daughter is happily possessed,
you doubtless fear that fathers pride
may lead you to unwarranted lengths.
But, believe me, sir, believe me" (this
with a voice choked with emotion),
"there is no step which you are not
warranted In taking to advertise the
talent of so great an artist. I, sir,
would have advertised her appearance
here in every paper published in the
city"
@But, my dear SIR" interrupted Mr..
Bateman, "she has been advertised in
all the papers here, every day for six
months"
II would" continued Ward, entirely
oblivious of any interruption, shave had
the town billed from end to end with
great posters, with Kate Bateman's
name upon them in letters foot long"
"But, good heavens! man," interpo-
lated Mr. Bateman, "the whole country
Is billed in letters four feet long"
"I should have had fine photographic
portraits exhibited in each of the princi-
pal stores"
"I did, I did" shrieked Mr.. Bate
man.
IT would have gathered the members
of the press together and banqueted
them" step which Mr.. Bateman had
taken few days before, and for which
he had just paid out $500. "In short,
concluded Ward, brooking no inter-
ruption and smiling placidly the while,
Il would allow the world to think me
vain if they would, but would never
consent to hide such a Light under
bushel. Never! never" and then he
walked away.
"What dye say that FOOLS name
is?" asked Bateman, turning upon
Drew.
"That," said Drew. ooh, that's
Charley Brown, Artemus Ward, you
know"
ooh, hell" muttered the old man,
but he couldn't refrain from joining In
the laugh, though it was at his expense.
Cincinnati Saturday Night.