National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1884-08-23
A LUNCHEON AT LORDS.

II not quito, the richest commoner in
England. He was about 30 years OF age
tall and slight, with pale, interesting
face and faded yellow moustaohe. Hi'
vices were comparatively few and OF
gentlemanly description. His near rela'
tions consisted of couple of married
sisters. He had no entanglements and
and was not gambler. Needless to say
therefore, that he was acknowledged by
common consent to DO the most eligible
parti in London. But, though by no means
impervious to the charms Of the fair sex
Byng was terribly difficult to please. The
loveliest young debutantes and the most
and the most astute mothers had for years
angled unsuccessfully for the glitterinR
prize. But each recurring season brought
with It some fresher beauty or some more
confident mamma, and hence the hunting
of Byng went merrily on.
He liked to talk to women about pic
lures, about poetry, love, transcendental
philosophy, and matters generally mys-
teal and ethereal. He found them so
much more tolerant than mon, and 80
much less apt to detect his utter and
CHASTITY ignorance of nearly every sub
iect upon which he conversed. Men. in
fact. considered Bying an affected MIN
compoop, and only endured him for the
sake of his wealth.
"Why the deuce don't you marry. Ad-
derlyY" remarked Capt. Tom Carbury
one day. :,
Tom Carbury was Byng's man-of-all.
work and devoted adherent. He had
lived upon him for some years, and 1t was
only when his eccentricity and vanity
became utterly wearisome to tho practical
henchman that he limited ut matrimony.
Carbury, moreover, did not see why he
should not make pretty good thing out
of his patrons marriage by Judicious
arrangement with the brides family.
"My dear Tom" answered the trans
cendcntalist. "where am to find woman
with kindred spirit; with soul above
the common things of earth; one who
can really sympathize with my own
idiosyncrasyp
blessed if / know" answered the
captain, terribly puzzled by his patrons
long words, "but If were in your shoes
should get rather sick Of being hunted
about by all the old dowagers In London
and ogled by every girl who comes out.
should marry one of them to spite the
rest"
AZ certainly cannot marry them all"
unused Byng, languidly. well. Carbury,
I'll think about It,"
The captain also determined to think 1t
over, for, as he stated, he was getting a
little tired of his position. He was a
thick.set, bull-necked man of two or
three and forty, very fond of good living
and devoted 10 London and Paris. Byng,
on the other hand, professed to despise
frivolous amusements, lived like an an
chorite for months together, and was in
the habit of occasionally rushing Off to
wild and uncivilized parts OF the globe,
where the unfortunate captain was forced
to submit to very unwelcome privations.
A Journey through Tartary had brought
the captain to the verge of rebellion, and
though he did not like the idea Of quar-
rolling with his bread and butter, he felt
that he could not endure many moro such
terrible experiences, 80 he began to look
about him for helpmate suitable to the
Grant philosopher.
His difficulty naturally lay in the
abundance of material from which he
had to make the selection. After mature
consideration, however, he decided in
favor of a certain Miss Constance Lax
ington. She was exceedingly pretty; it
was her frat season and her only near
relative was her father, whose pedigree
was much longer than his rent roll. Be-
sides, Mr.. darlington. as the captain knew,
was by no means overburdencd with cash
and was not likely to have any hesita-
ton In arranging some little scheme by
which Carbury might share in the ad-
vantages Miss Lexington would derive
from brilliant marriage.
"What deuced pretty girl your
daughter is" said the captain ono even-
ing to that young lady's father rs they
sat in the smoking room of tho Lawn
club.
think so2" inquired the other, who
knew that Carbury was not likely
to make such remark out Of pure good
nature.
might marry any one" continued the
captain, thoughtfully.
Lexington began to prick up his ears,
and said, ayes, think she ought to do
we'll"
After little more preliminary fencing,
Carbury began to approach tho point.
"She doesn't know, does shep"
mo, and shouldn't think it much use
II she did. He's not a marrying man, is
he?"
"Well, / don't quito understand what
COubbltubto u ihh ah"hs iOJpihCu
the cautious captain; but these things
do happen all the same. l should DO very
glad myself to see Byng married to nice
girl" he added significantly; ut would
do him a lot of good.'
Lexington drew his chair closer up to
Carbury, and the two became engaged in
q conversation apparently of the most
absorbing nature. After half an hour or
30, Carbury arose to go.
II suppose | must agree" remarked
Laxington; but you are terrible fellow
to deal with"
"All right" answered tho other; "half
when she's engaged, and the other OH the
wedding day. Man alive, it will be the
making of youW
A couple of days later Capt. Carbury
contrived that Miss Lexington, chap
eroned by her aunt, Lady Carraway,
should DO introduced to the philosophical
Byng at the house in Grosvenor square.
You might do worse than marry that
Lexington girl" remarked the captain to
his patron the next morning; young
and lovely, and all that; got no incon-
venient brothers, and you wouldn't be
plagued with u mOther-in-law. Not much
money, but that doesn't matter to you"
she seems a nice girl, said BynG, IN
his usual languid manner, "bnt how about
the fatherW
"Oh, Laxington's all right; CANDLES and
races a bit, but he always settles, and has
never been caught cheating. What more
can you expect nowadaySY
Byng was obviously impressed by the
probity of tho father-in-law in posse,
"'ll call on Lady Carraway," he an.
swered, and the subject dropped.
Byng duly visited her ladyship, who
wAs naturally delighted to 500 him and