Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-08-10
BRIGHT BITS.

SOME reward should be given to the intelli-
gent composition who set "a froth of July
speech" He probably had something
day.-Iecas S.ftiNgs.
A NEW member of the Conundrum club at
tempted to introduce a cOnundrum in which
''chaperone" and "her own chap were the
leading factors, but his motion was overruled
and the President referred him to chapter
in the constitution headed "Chestnuts. "-Ne1t
York Journal.
''WHAT,'i asks a very tender writer, ''what
can take the place Of babies?" -Sh! Bend
your ear little lower and Wen tell you
Other babies. You didn't suppose this years
crop lasted forever, did you? Goodness, man.
it will be clear out of style in Is MONTHS
Brooklyn Eagle.
WHEN the news that Greedy had been found
reached the Benson District, in Franklin
county, Ky, a fOrlorn, ague-shaken native
remarked, thoughtfully: Found, is he;
thought he was dead long ago; 1 voted for
him on'ct, but-my hide tO-if they ever
get me to do it again."
TALKED with a minion from Her Males
ty1is d9minions SAYS .:4 Where are yop
what are you going to hide a hoe forg" Says
he, II didn't say hide hoe Says l, ''Spell
it." Says he, 'I-d-a-h-O." ''Oh." says l.
Idaho" Eyes" says he, "Hide hoe"
(WHICH is the shortest way to the menag-
erie?" asked stout old gentleman Of GilhoO-
" ks
to see the animals, do youP YES, should
like to see the animals" IF YOU want to see
them to the best advantage, you had better
try my plan" ''What is th&t?' "Eat a
mince pie before going to bed."-zeeds Slit
iags.
tinguished professor, who was saying to his
baby: "On-ny, nO-ny, mussy tick his little
fOOtsy tooties." just then he caught sight of
the visitor, blushed and muttered: ''No. no,
MOI al nN -frsni1 pc
by extending them beyond the protecting
covering of the blanket or you will lay your
system open to attacks of catarrhal affection"
ITO THE unruly hens of the town of Great
harrington: You are hereby notified and
warned II you do not stop the disfguring of
the graves in the several cemeteries of this
town, your heads are in danger, and you will
go, you know where. Your owners are here
by notified to keep you out of the same. w.
W. LangdOn, Chairman of Selectmen.-Ad-
oerttsement IN Great HARRINGTON (KaSS.) COW-
rier.
VERY narrow escape: A youth of Hiber-
MAN extraction in chopping wood with
Ratchet, the other day, was so unfortunate as
to Craze the thumb of his left hand with
which he was steadying the piece of kindling
he was splitting. Ruefully gazing at the in
jured member, he remarked: 'Begorra, it
was good thing did not have hold of the
handle with both hands, or I'd have cut it of
sure"
hire me out on my varm," said old SweItzer-
case, Il oXamin his clOdings, more particular
his bantalOOns. Auf dey vas patched in vrOnt
unit | some work hat, gif him a chOb, but auf
dey vas patched pehint on der sot down blaze
of his preeches, told him don't no work got
at present, but he can leedle wood sawn vOr
his breakfast. Oh, | told you, de man who
hart works don't year oud his preeches pehint.
You chust put dot in your bipe unit shmoke
it.''-Peck'S Sun.
''ENGLIsH as she is sopke." First Londoner
-"AW, low do. Aw, by the way, bajove,
ave We card h'Aimee play in h'Engish? Hi
did. Beastly fiuke, bajove, We knaW; beastly.
She cawn't say h'a bloody word right, bajOve,
ye knaw." Second Londoner-''Naw, hi
didn't ave a hoppertunity to ear Ter, ye
knaw, but hi knew she'd ave trouble pro-
nouncing hour language, We knaw. Hall
bloody foreigners do, ye knaW." First Lon
dOner-"Ee s, bajove, hi never card h'any
foreigner, We knaw, as could pronounce
h'English like a h'Englishman, We knaw. -
PhaLGdeLDbiG CAL.
THE bOObeil blinks to the buzzing beam,
The craycrag calls to his crOney
The dulwile drowses in delightful dream,
And this here POEMS worth money.
The thuntab thrusts his thinking thum
Into the wayback woes of the war;
The hInIcalt hangs up his happy hum,
And the girley-girl takes the robert tailed
car.
Oh, estate are the eeyrie eyes
OF the mashtub down in Kentucky,
And soft and sweet are the soulful signs
Of the yOunglig who at faro Is lucky.
- Washington Hdtcbet.