Morning journal and courier., 1884-06-13
INDEPENDEN T.

The theory that the average length of life ia increasing is borne ont by the fact that there are at present as many survivors of the war of 1872 as there were fifty years ago. Boston Post. -
 Ella Wilcox, nee Wheeler. has just sung 'I will be true, though thou art false to me. " If she has not already chosen title to the song we suggest ''Ode to my back hair. Boston Post.
 ''Milkman, why does your milk always look SO blue, !" inquired the housewife. My COWS came from Boston, num-" proudly replied the milkman, ''and they're blue bloods."- Pittsbarg Chronicle-Telegraph.
 What is liberal educationP" asks Pro- lessor Eliot, of Harvard, in the June Gen. tury. The average student seems to think that it consists entirely in having liberal father and living next door to boat house. Burlington Free Press.
 A city physician in the South was sent for to see little country darky who was suffer- ing from small abscess just below the knee The child timidly barely elevated her dress. ''Poke out yer leg, nigger," her mother sternly ordered; 'legs ain't no rharrity ter Dr. D-."-Harper's Bazaar.
 The only thing lacking: number of gen. tlemen were discussing the literature of the day. The remark was made: "Whst English literature needs more. than anything else~ls OAhhoHpGdIOs claimed Bill Short, of the Crosby County Clarion and Farmers Vindicator, eff l only had time. ."-Texas Siftings.
 Michigan man whipped his wife because she wouldn't carry seed corn to the field The judge sentenced him to six naonths in jail. This is wrong The wife will nov have to hoe the corn if harvest is gathered. They ought to have confined the man in the field and compelled him to attend to the growing crop, and give his wife a rest Peck's Sun.
 A resident of the West End recently em. ploysd a colored gentleman to clear the win ter accumulation of ashes from his cellar, and the job being well done he summoned the Senegambisn to his presence, commended his work, and intimated the possibility of farther employment ''Glad to take yo' order. sah!' said the ash handler with satisfied grin ''And what is your name?" asked the employer. George Washington" was the complacent answer. George Wash ington, George Washington" pondered the inquirer quizzically; ''seems to me have heard that name before" The darkeys eyes rolled and his worries glistened as he delivered the crushing answer: "Golly, boss, tink you orter heard of it befo'; Ise been hollsring asheH roun' here desc ten yearsl"- Boston Commercial Bulletin.
 swEET-aIRL GRADUATES.
 o boy, give me the daily paper quick
 For l would read and knOW what LOW lb Fa1nes: I want to sec what's writ of each dear chick. The sweet girl graduates with baby nAmesl Of Lulis Susie, Fannie would read Of Nellie, LiIlie Minnie, and the games They play at composition much we need The sweet girl graduates with baby names! Do Mamie Birdie, Sallie write this year? And Hattie, Lizzie, Jennie? Language James In telling just how each of these appear The sweet girl graduates with baby names And what of Lotte, Hattie, Carrie too? And Daggie. Tillie, sillie? What so taaaes All savage men and makes them good and true. AS sweet girl graduates with baby nanes7 Yes give me, quick, the daily paper boy! Juss hand it over ere impatience mains Your youthful l1mbsI An, here's my joy! The sweet girl graduates with baby names!
 Louisville Courier-Journal