Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1884-06-28
THE BURGLAR ALARM.


she undelt took to restore to order the
chaos of Mr.. Fillisy's search through
closets and bureaus for the "few
things" he considered necessary to his
confort-"what shall / do? It's al
most dark, and nobody in the house but
the new girl, and l haven't time to go
to mothers, and I'm so afraid. Josiah
knows it, too. Why didn't he leave me
a pistol or something? Inever shot off
a pistol, and don't know what the
trigger is; but I'm sure 1 should feel
safer if l had one. How dreadful it
would be to be murdered here all alone
and Josiah to come home and find me
weltering in my gore! Ugh!' and Mrs.
Fillisy enjoyed good shiver over the
sanguinary picture she had conjured up.
But supper was announced at that
moment, and Mrs. Fillisy had no time
to revel in melancholy wonderings as to
how Josiah would feel then," and it
was not till after the two little ones
were snugly tucked in bed that she
had leisure to reflect upon her lonely
and unprotected state.
Il don't see why Josiah hasn't had
burglar alarms put in the house. 1t
would be so much better I'll talk to
him when he comics home. 1 wonder
what they are like, anyway? Alarm
clocks, l suppose, and that sort of
thing. Now, why couldn't one invent
something simpler? l WONDER
and here Mrs. Fillisy's thoughts were
arrested by bright idea.
She was seated by the stove, and her
glance fell upon the wire guard which
kept the wee toddlers from too close
contact with its glowing surface.
''The very thing" she exclaimed.
"I'll invent an alarm myself. Talk
about women having no inventive
genius. I'll have Josiah apply for a
patent the moment he comes home.
Now, I'll just get it and try, and if any
burglar undertakes to get in here to-
night he'll just wish he hadn't, that's
all! Tum, tie, tum, tie. tum,' and Mrs.
Fillisy started up in high glee.
After considerable pushing and haul
ing about in a closet under the stairs
she brought to view large coil of
barbed wire, in which Mr.. F. had the
previous summer invested for the pur-
pose of surrounding his orchard fence.
"Now isn't it lucky that Josiah didn't
use this? If he had, / couldn't have
shown him what smart wife he has,
and he wouldn't be able to refute, with
success. the assertion that woman has
a knowledge of mechanism. I'll show
them, Ouch! What mean stuff it is
to handle. But all the better for Mr.
Burglar. Now. where'll putt first ?"
Mrs. Fillisy pondered deeply, with all
the gravity worthy of great inventor,
and at last decided that as the hired
girl had gone to bed, and there was no
one but herself about, she would build
such wall of barbed wire at the foot
of the stairs as no burglar could posi-
bly, surmount. But when she had
wound it around the newel-post, with
many Abs and "Oh's," she found
that the wire wouldn't fasten itself to
the wall. and as for this brave inven-
tors making long and lonesome
Journey into the woodshed for hammer
and nails-no, indeed. she wouldn't.
She'd show Josiah that a woman's
mind could triumph over matter.
NO man would think of this" sh
said to herself, as she proceeded to fas.
ten the wire in and out of the claw
feet that held the stair-rods in position.
Dear me, it's slow work: but then all
problems are slow of solution, and Mrs.
F., you mustn't be too smart an in
ventor. / wonder what folkll do who
haven't got stair-rods? Get some, ]
suppose; or may be. now, when Josiah
comes home he can think of something