St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1884-10-04
MY NAME.

| Mr.. jeremiah Smith sat looking a
his wife with an air of com cal uncer
tainty, and his wife returned the loob
with an air of fixed determination.
MY dear. we must let him name
himself" said Mrs Smith.
But, consider, my love, what try.
ing osition for boy, Besides he Will
make some horrible mistake"
1T can't be any worse than some we
have made, Jeremiah; Just look at our
children. Is any one Of 'em satisfied
with his or her name?"
"No. But for that matter, have
never forgiven my great-uncle for nam.
ing me Jeremiah. | have had dislike
for that prophet ever since"
Eyes. that Just the point. Wien
we named our eldest girl Matilda Marie
we never considered how we were hurt
ing her feelings for life. She told me
only the other day that she hated her
name and would rather be called So
phronia Ann any time. And as Tor
Jonathan Edwards, and Wilhelm m
and Ulysses Bolivar. why, to hear them
talk, you would think they had drawn
| their names by lot out of a dictionary. "
well, L d d have little doubt my
self at the time about Ulysses Bolivar.
But you know we tried to make up for
the want OF grandeur in the last name
by putting it into the first
"Yes, and il doesn't work. No, Jere-
miah, we must let this one have fair
chance. Let him name himself, say
when he is eight years old. and then We
shall have one child that is satisfied"
Every well, my DEAR" and Mr..
smith, with sigh, partly in anticipa-
ton OF coming evil, buried himself in
the evening paper.
The subject of these remarks was
myself. [ was unconscious of their
meaning at the time, owing to the fact
that was but two months old. So, in
blissful ignorance of my lack of first
name. lived peacefully the space of
four years. AT the end OF that time
discovered the absence through the fol-
lowing circumstances: l WAS at play
with another boy of my own age and
he addressed me rather disrespectfully
as Club" l resented it. ..My name
isn't 'Bub'n
What is it, then?'
This was poser. / did not know.
l ran into the house, and exclaimed:
''Mother, is my name .Bub?'"
Her answer astonished me.
Il don't know, my son.
'.Bu. l want name. shall get cost
without one" cried, in alarm.
My mother replied. calmly: "Your
father and l have decided to let YOU
name yourself. So, when YOU are
eight years old you may choose your
own name. That will give YOU four
years in which to make up your mind"
But what will my name be until
them" l asked.
My mother hesitated. '.Well, we will
call you simply Smith.
but don, like that" cried.
IL is your fathers name, and you
can put up with it four years At the
end of that time, remember, you are to
name yourself.
Name myself! I was a contemplative
youth; revolved in my mind all the
possibilities included in this unheard-of
privilege. The more thought of it the
more liked it. would have a name
such as no other boy ever had before. 1t
would he a name destined to hand down
the family of Smith to posterity. No
one-syllabled affair, which |
could be turned or abbreviated into a
but asesquipedalian appella-
ton which would strike awe into the
rest of the family.
will pass over the four years dur
ing which | was nameless individual, |
from the rest of mankind
only "a boy called Smith," until |
was eight years old. On the evening of
that eventful day, at the supper table,
announced my selection of n name rs
Alexander Won Bismarck Smith.
My father groaned; my mother turned
pale.
Just what told YOU" exclaimed my
.ather, with a reproachful look.
"Well," replied my mother, recov-
sring herself after the first shock, "is
t any worse than Ulysses Bolivar?''
Mr.. Smith said nothing, but tried to
ook resigned.
But at the end of week l was tired
If Alexander Won Bismarck. 1t was
lot too long. But somehow it didn't
please me. Besides, red-headed youth
n the next yard persisted in calling me
: Biz" in spite of two severe lickings
to him behind the barn.
md one day in reading the newspaper
came across the very same name be-
onging TO man by the name of Smith,
wing in Dakota. So l decided to
hange. slept on my resolve, and in
he morning. as I was going to school,
nv father called out: alexander"
was so intent on my new name that
failed to hear him.
Alexander, you may split up that I
rood when you get home. DO you
carp
Yes, sir: but don't call me Alex
nder. please. I've got another name"
Another name" gasped Mr.. Smith.
Why, what do you mean9"
Il have determined to call myself :
.ichard Ceur de Lion. sir-''