The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-03-21
THE RIVAL DOCTORS.

1HE RIVAL DOCIOhSs
When old DR.. Golett died. his patients
thought it hard Providence that left
them. with their lumbago, rheumatics
and various other chronic ailments to
the tender mercies of broad-shouldered
young Jack Golett. Undoubtedly he had
graduated from the best medical school
in the country, and for year past had
been his fathers assistant, often and
deferentially consulted by the unbigoted
old man who did his Test to keep up
with the times. and had the utmost re-
spect for new and sensible ideas, but
the inhabitants of Stagnantville, especi-
ally the older inhabitants, more gen.
orally afflicted by the above mentioned
disorders, professed great contempt for
~new-fangled methods of treatment, and
fervently wished for a medical man of
the good, old school to fill, as far as
possible, the place of their lamented
friend and physician.
Indeed, Old Romeo Cooke Ca complete
satire on the house of Montague, and
-disrespecfully dubbed by the younger
population, 1.-THE Great American
Grumbler'') declared himself ready to
become martyr to the cause of sup
pressing upstart coots to the extent of
being drawn and guartered. though
exactly how this painful operation could
accomplish the desired end, it is diff
cult to explain. Poor old Romeo was
a martyr already to acute rheumatism,
and the dearth of sympathy rendered
him might well be warning to all of
us who lack good temper. The crotchety
old man had tried living with his mar
ried daughter, whose husband, poor
young mechanic, had received him
cheerfully. and even counseled his wife
to get a ''bit of something relishy" for
her parent; but he had soon become I'M
bearable, and was now established in q
little shanty of his own, where every
morning his daughter saw him oom-
fortably .sfiXed" for the day.
Those of the neighbors who had dared
brave the lion in his den had been met
with such snarling and showing of teeth
that they seldom repeated the attempt.
But there was a weak spot even in this
apparently invulnerable crust of ILL
humor, if one only knew where to look
for it.
In his young days. Romeo had been
undergraduate to On English Lord,
down in Lancashire; and, on occasions
of rare good humor. he would describe
in glowing scenes of barbaric splendor
that did vast credit to his Imagination.
These fantastic tales, however, had
been rehearsed only for the.l eneft of
his daughters family and Mss Kitty
Vannetta, bright-faced, End-kearted
young girl. who had set out TO win the
illness of his condition.
She found the task she had set herself
far more difficult than she had sup
posed, and if she had not happened by
the merest chance to hit upon this gar
dener phase of old Romeo's life, am
afraid she would have had to give it up;
and then this story would never have
been written. AS it was. this artful
young person proceeded to win the toll
erance of the unsuspecting old fellow
by carrying him little dainties, and
while he ate them asking him leading
questions about his lordship's magnifi-
cent stud of horses. and the gold dishes
in daily use in his lordship's house
hold.
Yes, miss" the old man would say,
grandiloquently, .'that were something
ike; where's the place you can show
me in these parts that has its gate
keepers lodge, or yet the gate to
mind?" g.
And Kitty was obliged to acknowl-
edge that in those ..parts" the gates
were minded" very spasmodieally,
principally on moonlight nights by IN
competent, young persons, engrossed
in their own affairs.
Gradually, and in his own way. old
Romeo grew quite fond of this girl who
read him the weekly Times. and en-.
couraged him to talk of his .Ibetter
days." she did more, for she draped
dotted muslin curtains, fashioned from
a cast of summer gown, over his high.
bleak little windows; and ingeniously
stuffed and made comfortable a rock.
ing-chair for his ungrateful old bones,
for when Jack Golett, with much incon-
yenience, crowded it into his buggy,
and proceeded to deposit it in his bare
little room. Romeo rated him soundly
for his ''namby-pamby homeopathic
principles, and requested him In the
future to keep bis nag's head turned in
the other direction.
Jack Golett and Kitty had always
been great friends. In their childish
days Jack had persisted in declaring
Kitty the prettiest girl in town. in spite
of various stylish New York cousins,
who hsd made deep impressions ON less
faithful boyish hearts; and Kitty. in
long since abandoned school-gir slang.
had called her delighted cavalier the
s'best fellow going" All through the