davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
NUMBER 50.
FUN.
Par excellence-A GOOD father.


Par excellence-A good father.
A call to arms-"Joh take the baby"
The Judge.
Gets Tery hot-headed when it il
scratched-A match.
When maiden takes her tatting to a
sewing circle she expects to meet with
others who will tattoo. ~ YonEsrs Gazette.
'fRents are high this year, murmured
G. D. Kuss, as he gloomily surveyed a
split in the back Of his coat. Boston B,sI-
Ltin.
A ready-made rejoinder: He-sfYou
made fool Of me when 1 married you,
madam" She-@Lorl You always told
me you were aself-made n!''-London
Punch.
DR.. Dio Lewis says the big hats keep
the sunshine from the faces Of American
women. They keep the footlight glare
from the faces Of many American men,
Hartford Post.
"You can lead horse to the water,
but you can't make him drink, = says the
old saw. You couldn't make some men
drink either if you took them to a by
drant. -Haaskeys.
The man who was huggcd BY grizzly
remarked on being rescued that he had
never had such tremendous pressur
brought to bear upon him before.-Bur-
lingtoH Free Press.
Marry me, beloved, " implored the
gilded youth on his knees, and your pin
money shall be a thousand dollars day. .
''Bahn she replied, contemptuously /;
''what's that7 Am not a prima donnaT'
brooklyn Eagle.
japanese widows signify their readi-
ness to marry again by the manner in
which they dress their hair. Banged, it
means, Come on-plenty Of broom drill =
frizzed, 'rYou may marry me, but I will
firt;" combed plain, 'Tll try to be real
good, but you mustn't expect me to cook. I"
Burlington Free Press.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10

Walking up Fifth avenue about
o'clock one evening during the past week
1 observed some uniformed German
musicians discoursing cheap music op-
posite the Windsor hotel. As they were
playing all the "old familiar pieces I
paid no particular attention to the band,
but hurried on to keep my engagement
My ''call'' lasted 1 should say about two
hours; more or less, and when came
tripping down the Ivenue 1 found musi-
clans blowing away on their horns in
front Of the same house where the Ten
tonic tooters were at work when I went
up. Wondering if it was the same band
and also if they had made ''big strike
l sought one Of the finest, who, natur-
ally enough, stood with a hackman in
front Of the Windsor taking in the free
concert.
Hello" I said, sis that the same
band that was over there two hours,
ago?"
II should smile" replied the fun
knight of the club. 'cNot much. The
band you saw there early in the eveniI
got what they could and this is fres
lot"
Somebody living there, I guess, who
likes street band music.
eyes; a family named Bloodgood.
Wealthy people. Mr.. Bloodgood is q
broker or speeulator. He is rich. Who
pays the band toplayl Mrs Bloodgood.
She gives them half dollar Or dollar
and they play until they get tired Then
another band comes around, and she
pays them all. of course, or else they
wouldn't come. It's soft snap 50 long
as Mrs. Bloodgood continues to give
them money. Free music for the whole
neighborhood7 1 should say it was The
guests of the Windsor, and everybody
living within the distance Of block, get
the full benefit of these periodical con-.
eerts. Oh, yes, all the bands and hand
organs turn up in front of the Bloodgood
mansion as regularly as day and night
come around. 1 don't know the reason,
but l suppose it's Mrs Bloadgood's
whim. "-Nel0 York Truth.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
Damon and PyIhias.

Years ago, when the Wedden house in
Cleveland, Ohio, was being built, Thomas
Potter and James Henry (masons) were
at work side BY side on enc Of the upper
walls. One of the men slipped and
would have fallen had not the other
caught him and held him until helm
came. From that day onward the old
story of Damon and Pythias was recalled
in the close friendship between these two
men. They were companions and chnms
in the closest meaning Of the TERMS
They bought places in Solon, Ohio, and
lived side by side, and people got 50 that
when they saw Potter they knew Henry
was not far off. Said officer Of the
Cleveland Society for Avings: THE
two kept their accoull.s with US for
years. When one came in we knew the
other was close at hand 1t became .
standing joke, and the men enjoyed it a.
much as we did. They often said that
when one died the other would soon fol-
low him. It was prophecy. The tive
died recently within five weeks of each
other. 1t struck me as q unique thing
that such friendship should run through
50 many years without flaw, and thnt
the two should travel over the dark river
almost in company.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10

its pink slip and coral ornaments, but
harder to recognize the basket, for it
was one mass of flowers and, tied with
ose-pink ribbons, looked as gay as a
peacock.
There was only one thing that came
near marring the perfect enjoyment Of
the occasion. 1t was when the minister,
pale, slight intellectual-looking man,
stepped forward to begin the ceremony
in which the ''wave" was to have a
Christian name, and Captain Weatherby
called out;
"Ship ahoyn
The good man stopped and looked per
picked.
"Stow the prayers, parson," said the
captain; ''short services on this ship, if
you please
The minister smiled and the ceremony
proceeded, and all the prayers and re-
marks of the occasion were condensed by
the celebrant into single quotation:
'fWhen my father and mother forsake
me then the Lord will take me up. y
Detroit Free Press.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
Diving for sea-Eqqs.

The "sea-eggs' are species of the fam
lily Echinida. Diving for them BY the
Fuegian women is one of their most pain
full and dangerous ways Of procuring
food, as they often have to follow it when
the sea is rough, and in coldest weather.
The following description is taken from
Mayne Reds Land of Fire" in St.
Nicholas:
"The savages do not long remain idle,
another resource engaging them-a feat
for which the Fuegian native has obtained
world wide celebrity namely, diving
for sea-eggs. A difficult, dangerous in
dustry it is, and just on this account com
mitted to the women, who alone engage
in it.
''Having dispatched their poor break
fast, half dozen of the younger and
stronger women take to the caRoes-two
in each-and paddle out to where they
hope to find the sea-urchins.
'Arriving there, she who is to do the
diving prepares for it by attaching little
wicker basket to her hip, her companion
being intrusted to keep the canoe in place,
a task which is no easy one in water SO
rough as that of the sea-arm chances to
be now
Everything ready, the diver drops
over head foremost, as fearlessly as would
a water-spaniel, and is out of sight fol
two or three minutes; then the crow
black head is seen bobbing up again, and
swimming back to the canoe with a hand
overland stroke, dog fashion, the egg.
gatherer lays hold of the rail to rest her
self, while she gives up the contents Of
her basket
Having remained above water just
long enough to recover breath, down she
goes a second time, to stay under for min
utes, as before. And this performance is
repeated again and again, till at length,
utterly exhausted, she Climbs back into
the canoe, and the other ties on the bas-
ket and takes her turn at diving.
"Thus, for hours, the submarine egg
gatherers' continue at their arduous, peri
lous task; and, having finished it, they
come padding back to the shore.
Sand on landing. they make straight
for the wigwams, and seat themselves by
fire-almost in it-leaving the spoil to
be brought up by Others"
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
lust in Time.

The following is an old, but q good
story, and well worth repeating:
The Young surgeon having tried in
vain to get into practice, at last fell upon
the following expedient to set the ball to
rolling. He sprang upon his horse once
day, and rode at full speed through
the town. After an absence of an hour
he would return. and carry with him
some Of his instruments, thinking if he
could impress his neighbors that he had
practice, they would begin to place con
fidence in his ability.
A wag, who more than suspected the
deceit which he was practicing, deter
mined to know the truth. He accord
ingly kept his horse in readiness, and
the next time the doctor galloped past
his door, he sprang on his steed and
placed himself on the young gentleman's
trail.
The doctor saw the man following on
his heels, but did not at first evince any
uneasiness. At length, however, he
thought it advisable to turn down
narrow lane. The pursuer followed on
like an evil genius; but the doctor was
not discouraged, as another road lay
short distance ahead of him, down which
he turned. The other kept close at his
heels, and the doctor grew impatient to
return home. There was no house by
the way at which he could afford any
pretext for stopping.
In the meantime his saddle-bags were
with him, and he was otherwise equipped
for business, so that he could not return,
in the face of his neighbor without ex-
posing the secrets Of the trade in the
most palpable manner. Every bound Of
his steed carried him farther from his
home. and the shades of night began to
fall on hill and dale. Still the sound of
the horses hoofs were laundering in his
ears, and he was driven to his wits end ;
but just as he turned the angle of the
wood, he heard low moan. A man lay
PROSTATE near the fence of a meadow, and
blood gushed from fearful wound in his
arm. He had cut an artery with his
scythe, and was in danger Of immediate
dissolution. The young doctor sprang
from his horse, and stanched the wound.
Bandages were applied, and his life was
saved. The pursuer had also thrown him
self from his horse, and, as the surgeon
tied up his last bandage, he looked up in
his face, and said, Chow lucky, neigh
Dor, that I was able to arrive just in
timeln
The wondering Z. 5ator was silent
with awe; and after assisting the wounded
man home, he told such miraculous tale
to the wondering town folk as secured
the young surgeon reputation not only
for skill but also for supernatural preset
ence. Thus did the merest accident con
tribute more to his advancement than
years of studious toll could have done;
and the impertinent curiosity Of a wag-
gish neighbor opened for him path to
business which the most influential pat.
ronage might never have been able to
provide for him.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
Your presence is desired at the christen-
ing party of our adopted daughter,
ETHEL,
Wednesday afternoon, January 8, 1884.
Ceremony at 3.
MR.. AND MRS. SILAS wEATHERBY.

If anyone expected fashionable gath
ering, it was simply because they did not
know their host and hostess very we'll.
The great, comfortable house was full Of
guests, but they were mostly people of
the Weatherby stamp; good, plain. sensi-
bic souls who did not go through life
junketing and dancing, so they carried
into any occasion Of enjoyment in which
they participated an almost childish zest.
And all the ladies purred over that blessed
baby, and all the gentlemen buttonholed
the captain and made him tell the story
over.
''Found it on the doorstep, you say;
found it on the door-step2 How very
remarkabler'
eAnd In that very boat basket, mean
grounded as it were at my feet-the
prettiest wave that ever struck the shoals
for me-lny eyes, STRIP
1t was hard to recognize the baby in
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
Dutch Costumes.

The most peculiar costumes are to
be found among the islanders Of the
north of Holland. Some of the women
are dressed in garments which give them
the appearance of a semi-barbarous race;
while the men are mostly attired in enor-
mously wide breeches and loosely fitting
jackets made of exceedingly coarse and
strong materials.
The male peasants of iceland usually
wear jackets and knee breeches of black
velveteen, gray worsted stockings, scarlet
waistcoats, closed entirely to the throat,
and having in front row Of silver but
tons as closely set together as it is pos
sible for them to be, while two large
silver bosses are attached to belt round
the waist.
The partiality for buttons exhibited by
the Zeelanders is remarkable. To Judge
from the number they wear on their gar
ments, one would suppose dressing and
undressing to be with them an exceed
ingly tedious process.
have read of an eccentric Dutchman,
the master Of fishing smack, who used
TO pride himself on wearing a suit Of
coarse blue serge, the coat of which is
described as having been buttoned with
rijksdaalders (coins worth about a dollar
each). the waiscoat with gulden, the
trousers with half-gulden, and the waist
band with kwartjies about the size Of
an English sixpence). Then his check
shirt had for buttons dubbeltjes (silvcr
twopencesJ; he wore two large silver
coins. instead of buckles, on his shoes,
and rijksdaalder in front Of his hat -
Harper's Weekly.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
AduIteraIion Of Food.

In reference to the law regulating the
adulteration of drugs and food products
that has passed the Ohio legislature, the
Cleveland Herald observes: 1T has be-
come notorious that articles of food sus-
ceptible of adulteration are universally
cheapened by means Of various impuri-
ties. Some of the spices are made with
scarcely touch Of the article it processes
to be, dried and ground woods being
prepared with chemicals to represent the
article. Analysis has proved the finest
grades of butter to contain foreign in
gradients. Even coffee in the berry form
is adulterated by mixture of clay formed
into an exact counterpart of the berry it.
self, Cinnamon, pepper, cloves, allspice,
sugars, flour, jellies, everything that is
employed in the culinary department of
the household is a deception Professedly
pure articles are as notoriously impure.
Few persons but would prefer to pay
higher price for pure article than pur-
chase an impure one at a cheap rate If
these will see to it that the men they
deal with keep in stock nothing that is
impure, the battle is at once won. Some
examples may be necessary before pure
food can always be purchased, and these
examples should be made The law pro
vides that dealers or manufacturers found
guilty of manufacturing or selling adul-
terated food products as pure shall be
fined not more than $100 or less than $25
or imprisoned. Persons who care for
purity in the food they eat are the ones
to insist on dealers observing the pro-
visions of the law
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
what He Was.

A boy found woman's switch in the
opera-house and returned it to her.
Thank you, my little man, said the
lady; "you are an honest boy"
'sOh, no, I'm not 50 very honest; but
! know what l am. .
What are you, thenY''
"a hair restorer. Free Press.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
THE BULL

ssHuzzain From box and balcony
Rang out the loud exultant cry:
"Huzzal the matadorw
From floor to roof glittering maze
Of gorgeous robes and faces fair,
With lustrous laces cleaning rare,
And wells of futtering gossamer,
And fans that set the air astir,
And flowers that bleom and gems that blaz
Filled all the amphitheatre.
Below them in the sunlit space
Beneath the tranquil April skies,
Two combatants stood face to face;
A milk-white BULL with fer eyes,
Huge, frantic, mad with rage and pain,
His great head bowed to charge the foe,
And, poising with a cool disdain
His weapon for the fatal blow,
A youth, decked out in gorgeous wise.
A murmurous hush, breathless pause
The ladies leaned far out to see.
A flash of scarlet drapery-
A plunge-a believing roar-a cloud
OF flying dustl Then burst the applause,
With cheer on cheer of wild delight
That rolled the echoing circle round.
And while, low-fallen upon the ground,
His victim struggled hard with death,
The hero of the noble fight,
Rained on with flowers from fingers white
Mid ringing bravas, smiled and bowed
A child sobbed softly in the crowd
''Alas, poor built" below her breath
She wept. "Alas, poor pretty bullf'
With sad eyes, grieved and pitiful,
And down beside him in the sand,
One blossom, wet with fearful dew,
One little crimson rose she threw,
And hid her sweet eyes with her hand.
And still all tongues the victor sang,
1Huzzaln the laundering plaudits rang,
ssHuzzaI the matadorI'
-Margaret Johnson, in Vide Atcake
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10

We are often selfish in our love, desir.
ing more to be loved in return than "
benefit the object Of our affections W.T.
are sometimes 50 ten7er Of our relations
as to sacrifice truth or justice for fear ui|
disturbing them more eareful III ou
friends feelings than Of his character.
and of his continued regard tor cuTsal VU8
than Of his best welfare.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10

Stamford, Conn, has living within its
limits eighty persons over eighty years oi
age. Combined, their years foot up
0.71e, and the average is 1895. Twelve
are over ninety-four years old, the list
being headed by ex-United States Sena-
tor Truman Smith
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10
A Telephone CHAR.

A gentleman stepped up to the coun-
ter at the Astor house the other day, and
asked for telephone cigar.
''What kind of cigar is that Z" in
quired the unsuspicious proprietor.
"One Of the kind that you smoke in
New York and they can smell in Brook
lyn, was the answer. Electric Revier.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10

The following ages have on the au-
thority Of skilled arboricuIturist been
attained by trees: Yew, s,200 years
schubertia, 5000; cedar, 1000; oak.
1900; spruce. 1900; lime, 1.1Oo; ori
entail plane, LOCO; walnut 900; olive
and cypress, 500; orange, eso; maple,
500; elm, 800,
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1884-04-10

Where did you come from, baby dear?
Out of the everywhere, into the here.
Where did you get your eyes so blue?
Out Of the skies as / came through
What makes your forehead smooth and high
A soft hand stroxed it, as | went by.
What makes your cheek like warm, white
rose!
| saw something better than any one knows.
Whence that three-cornered smile Of bliss!
Three angels gave me at once a kiss
Where did you get that coral ears
God spoke, and it came out to hear
Where did you get those arms and handsl
Love made itself into bonds and bands.
Whence came your feet, dear little things!
From the same box as the angels wings
How did they all first come to be youl
God thought about me, and SO / grew.
But how did you come to us, you dears
God thought about you, and so am here.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-03-30
Newspaper once Etiquette.

Newspaper office etiquette; Don't ex-
pectorate on tho floor; It soils the Brus-
sells and makes the wearing OF overshocu
necessary. Try the ceiling or squirt
ever tho transom. Wipe your feet on
the mat, If you have to bring one with
you. Heavy mon will please not sit
down too abruptely in tho raw silk,
hand.painted cushion chairs - II
weakens the springs. II you must put
your feet ON the narble-top tables, have
! sponge ready 70 wipe mp the stains.
Do not smoke; nothing 10 40 offensive to
the reporters than the odor Of . cigar
= poor one--or even good one, unless
You have its mate with you. Accom-
pany all religious notices with tho regu.
lsr advsrtising prices--not as matter
of but - guaranty Of good faith. -
Brandford Sunday Mail.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-03-30
Burdensd with knowledge.

Captain w. II. Parker gives in his
"Reminiscences" an amusing incident
which happened ON the James river ut
the beginning Of the civil war.
Speaking Of torpedoes reminds me Of
o laughable incident. Our river steamers
went down to City Point occasionally
with prisoners to exchange. As wc had
torpedoes in the river anywhere from
Drary's Bluff TO Trent's Reach, and be-
lew. their captains ran great risks.
On one occasion two Of cur boats were
returning from City Point, fortunately
with no passengers, when one Of them
struck . torpedo and Immediately went
down. A boat went from the other
steamer and found the captain struggling
in the water with q Webster's Una.
bIidgsd Dictionary in his arms.
Az he was pulled into the boat, he
said, II did not have time to get It on. "
He thought he had seized life-pre-
server. - Youths Companion.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-03-30
Real Estate Sale
a.
San Gabriel. Walnut Avenue,
on THE PREMISES.
TUESDAY, APRIL l, 1884,
Al 8 O'Clock In the afternoon. rain or shine.
A Desirable Homo for Gentleman.

] will soil Cottage House and 10 acres highly
improved land on the Alhambra, directly oppo-
site the residence and grounds Of q. d. Adams
and Z. L. Maybsrry, as follows: Rich. loamy,
sandy soil; all fire thrifty trees and vines In full
bearing. containing 400 Grange trees-Nayoi aud
Eiben variety; 200 vines Of nne assorted table
grapes, as Muscat of Alexandria, Flame Tokay,
etc about 800 Bartlett pearr, peach, apricot ngs
and apple trees
The cottage contains rooms and kitchen, do
tached Water throughout the house. stable and
corral.
NorE.-A Adjoining and near these grounds are
the elegant grounds and residences OF O. b.
Adams, X. l.. Mayberry, Sooyilie and Mrs. Hol.
stead This tract IL beautifully elevated. COM
mandIng fine view Of the Sierra Madre villa.
the elegant Raymond Hotel now In process o.
Shorb. Balwin, Carter and others. (DistAncs BY
carriage from Los Angeles, 4b minutes; by earl,
10 mlnutes) Tho neighborhood 10 choice, select
and first t-ciass. Tho property in and Ground San
Gabriel is rapidly improving and In the last three
years has advanced five hundred per cent. One
Of tho best water rights plped On tho ground.
Rates very reasonable. The water right will be
sold with the grounds. Only ten fninutes WALK
from tho depot to the grounds.
Churches Of all denominations In the immedi
ate vicinity. The large. elegant new school
house only one block on. Tastily arranged
grounds around tho house and walks; the
choicest flowers, plants, towering shrubes and
ornamental trses. This Is Just the spot for
gentleman OF leisure, home, or undoubtedly
capital speculation TO hold, there 10 very little
i any improved property directly In the heart o.
the place for sale. fo DO appreciated must be
seen. ] will direct YOU At Ban Gabriel to R. !.
Bayley, the Ventlemanly proprietor OF the hotel,
who will direct you to the grounds.
For further particulars and price apply ct office.
feb5 JOHN q. BELL Auctioneer.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-03-30

A prominent physician asserts that a
woman can really be made quite i'll by
trying to keep great secret; yet, with.
out wishing to cause any illness, but
rather to cure it, we have secret to
impart, and that is, there is only one
thing that will dissolve the poisonous
Uric acid which exists in the blood Of
Rheumatic and Gouty patients. OF
course you are at liberty to tell the Sc
cret, which is called Salicylica. 1t
strikes directly at the cause of Rheu-
matism, Gout and Neuralgia.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-03-30
A casus pe,,i.

ts-"Hatei l shall hate that man
( to my dying day.
hks--"But you told me be never
"a word to you, and that, 20 far rs
know, he never spoke word against
m.v
jJinks--"That is true, but he incurred
nv lifelong hatred all the same"
4 Finks-"In what way?"
Jinks-"You know what grand
wedding we had whom ! was married to
your cousin, and there is no use denying
10 you that while she had million in
her own right ! had not cent"
"Finks--"That was Of course under
stood, but as she loved you that was suf-
ticent, and l know she Is happy. But
what has that to do with your hatred OF
my friend Blank. He was thore and sat
in front seat, but he said nothing
Jinks-'In the marriage service ! had
to says with all my worldly goods ]
thee endow.'"
Finlxs--"Yes."
Jinks-"Blank snickered. .'-Phiiadel.
phia Call.