Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1884-08-09
4 atsrx Ah.us ur. 7uu.

pendentS, and keeps some OF them Dy
force and some by cunning. He holds
Ireland by force and Irishmen know
what that means.
Mr.. Bull once owned large land
tenure in America, and expected to
make another Ireland here-that is, to
have America dependent on him for
clothes, furniture farming tools, and
and even bricks to build houses of.
This was to be accomplished by force
also, and stringent laws were made to
prevent the Introduction of teachers
and machinery into America to enable
her people to shake off their depend
ence on Mr.. Bull. In.
Mr.. Bull held that as he could fur
nish supplies to our people cheaper
than they could manufacture them for
themselves, it would be insane for
Yankees to build dams and go to fool
ing with water wheels, steam engines,
and other dangerous instruments like
buzz saws, exploding grindstones, and
poisonous chemicals, putting life and
limb in jeopardy; and 80 he prided
himself on his benevolence in
making laws to prevent US from
injuring ourselves. and at the same
time securing TO us the advantage of
having his cheap goods for our COM
fort and prosperity. 'g2
Now if happened that there were
few obstreperous fellows in America
who did not fully believe in the doc
trine of being dependent on John Bull,
and they made big hullabaloO about
it and got up a row which resulted in
compelling Mr.. Bull to surrender his
grip on this country-which be did
and our people began to make laws for
themselves. fl
Mn. Bull was greatly afraid that the
new country would make laws injur-
ing itself, and would be foolish enough
to spend time and money in building
shops, and factories, and foundries,
and ships, and 60 to doing our own
work, when all the time be could do it
for us so much better and cheaper.
Strange to say, the Americans did
that very thing. They became the
very fools that Mr.. Bull feared they
would be. They actually made laws
that practically shut off the old gentle
mans cheap goods, and it nearly broke
his heart to have his benevolent intent
despised anddefeated by an ungrateful
and scandalous race of miscreants.
But Mr.. Bull is a persevering old
man, and he said to himself" Those
people are not all fools. Perhaps by
spending a few millions l might build
up Golden Bull party there which
would convince the people that George
Washington, Alexander Hamilton,
Thomas Jefferon, Heny Clay and
Daniel Webster were enemies of the
laboring men, and had enacted those
laws which built up mills, shops, vii.
lagos and cities just to keep the work
ingmen poor, aud prevent them taking
advantage of my kind offer to sell
them. ar their supplies at vastly
cheaper rate Faith, and I'll try it on,
anyhow" said he.
So the old man looked about and got
his eye on a professor named Sumner,
o minister named Beecher, a lawyer
named Hurd, a Bohemian named
Wells, and some others, and set them
to work advocating his plan Of British
cheap goods as against the monstrous
iniQuity of American taX-burdened mo-
nopoly goods that were ruining the
country and preventing it from becom.
ing that paradise which is the lot of i
countries that tear down their mills.
blow up their wicked old dams, put
out their furnaces. and close their
mines for the sake of taking advantage
of the friendly, fathcrly kindness of
Mr.. Bull
These men were exceedingly elo.
duent and got up their club and called
IL the Golden Club, because it was a
truly English affair in its inception and
purpose, and would be supported with
British money. They worked with a
will and 1t was not long before Bayard.
Carlisle, Mcdonald, Cox and Morrison
had the Democratic party pledged to
the British scheme and resolved to toll
crate the American system no longer.
They say the Irishmen will vote to
help Mr. Bull and the British because
it is Democratic to aid Mr.. Bull.
Mr.. Bull does not like Mr.. Blaine.
He has an idea Mr.. Blaine is an Ameri-
can. He is afraid that Mr.. Blaine is in
favor of having the goods which are
consumed in America made in Ameri.
ca, and has II purpose to give home
workmen something to do in preference
to giving people in Birmingham and
Manchester all the Jobs. He imagines
Mr.. Blaine holding notions about
home, home comfort, home labor, and
home rule, that are in antagopism with
his, and with Beecher's, aad Bayard' S
and David A. Wells; and what money
he puts into the campaign will be put
in to jafaot Mr. Rlaine
Mr. Bull is an honest conservative
Englishmau. He can support Mr.. Cleve-
land or any good man not too much
in favor of Yankee workshops and
Yankee notions and Yankee mechanics.
but Mr.. Blaine is too aggressive and
might slosh round and tread on some
corns grown from seed raised in the
gardens of Windsor Castle.
No. Mr.. Blaine does not suit Johnny
Bull. B. Nam, in the Issue.
Some Wretchsd Puns.