Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1884-05-02
FUN
The Obliging Clerk.

AND HIS EXPERIENCE WITH A NICELY
DRESSED, PLEAsANT-FACED WOMAN.
Twill you please let me look at your d.
rectory 2" a nlcely-dTessed, pleasant
little woman asked yesterday in down.
town office.
''Certainly," said the oblEging clerk, as
he stepped down from the high stool and
placed the book at her disposal. Then
getting up to the desk again he proceeded
with his writing. The lady opened the
directory, examined it for while, and
then turning to the obliging clerk, whose
head was full of figures, interrupted him
by asking, with pleasant smile On her
face: "Have you any Of those calendars
for 1SS4''' The clerk gasped, as he was
in the middle of a long column OF figures;
but he politely went to the rear of the
Office and brought back the calendar.
Thanks" the lady remarked. smiling
pleasantly, and as she was examining the
calendar the clerk climbed on the high
stool and started on the column of figures
again. Thinking that the pleasant little
lady would see that he was busy, and.
Furthermore. believing that her wants
were attended to, he paid no further heed
to her, and had proceeded about two
thirds of the way down long column of
figures when she again approached him,
and without waiting for him to finish the
column remarked, with the same pleasant
smile on her face: "That's very pretty :;
caD3 IT. Won on aro mo opotkor
The obliging clerk said nothing, but
went back for the other calendar. He re-
appeared and handed the second one to the
lady, waited while to be sure that he
would not be bothered again, and had
just reseated himself when the pleasant
voice once more sounded IN his ear.
"Have you any business cards2 Ny
little daughter is making collection,
and [ would like to have yours.'
The 7x9 smile on the obiging clerks
face now gave way to stare of astonish-
ment, but he gave her the cards, and. as
he did so, formed resolution not to get
upon his high chair until the lady had
gone; SO, appearing to busy himself in
looking over a book, he awaited the next
question.
"Wili you oblige me with small piece
OF wrapping paper, so that l can do these
up ?'' she asked.
The clerk, only too glad to do ANYTHING
now to hasten her departure, again did as
requested. Of course that is all she will
ask for, thought he, and, congratulating
himself he could now go on with his figure.
he climbed up to the desk once more. and
had just got his attention fixed upon HE
work when to his dismay the pleasant
lady again approached him, and, with The
same winning smile, said
Excuse me, but cannot you oblice me
with small piece of cord to tie these
up ?''
1t is the custom in court when drawing
jury for the judge to Inquire of the sher-
If, lis the panel full ?" Apropos of this
phrase a good story Is told of Sussex
tDel) county judge who was not entirely
datdt with respect to judicial forms. At
the conclusion of drawing he turned to
the sheriff with much assumed dignity
asked, us the jury full 2" The jury was.
IN fact, not far from that condition. and
after critical survey of their flushed
faces and bleared optics, the sheriff en-
barrassingly replied: "Well-Judge-T
believe they are; all but old man Ihon1r-
son, and he don't drink, but that is the
best | could dO.'
in hn
brown seeing blind man about to en-
teri: Were you aware how delicate the
touch of blind person is /? When nature
deprlves US Of one sense she makes amends
by bringing the other senses to extraordi- |
nary acuteness. Let us illustrate by this
gentleman. I'll take a scoop of sugar and
let him feel Of it, and you will see how
quickly he'll tell you what it ISL
The blind man having entered he ,caz
put to the test. He put his thumb and
niger into the scoop, and without hesita. |
tlon said, "That is sand" Everybody |
laughed but the grocer He made three /
several attempts at blushing, and then 4
went into the back shop and Kicked bis |
dog.
TRYING TO TIkE HIM OUT.-Mamu,a
| met young MIR. Nicefellow on the straas |
to-day and told him frankly that altbe,ssb
he was was welcome to come to SAC yon
he should remember that you were young
and needed plenty of sleep, and he there
fore ought not to stay so late.
Nellie: And what did he say? +
Mamma tie shocked me awfully by ill., Z
slsting that you kept him from going.
Nellie Oh the great big story teller I
tried my best to tire him out 80 that be \
would go home.
Mamma: Tried to tire him out! Whv
how
Nellie: By sitting on his lap.-Phala.
aell7tia Call. /
LETS see'' he remarked to dealer on
Chatham street, haven't you brother
In the clothing business in Cincinnati 2u
"OxacSly. My brudder Moses vhas dere.n
''And how is he doing p. "Bad-werrv
bad. Moses vhas not the man to see on
''How ?" 'sVheIl, when dot
Hood came Moses should have peen in der.
rubber coat and poot peesness,b but he vhs.s
eft. Den when der riot took place, Moses
should hat been stocked up nit guns r,nd
pistols, but he hadn't so much as a trio
yer. Moses vhas on his way to the moor.
house, be vhas."
81 have only few minutes to s,,ay -
lurriedly explained Columbus you tn as
le embraced his sweetheart. ssOur yeoi.
nent is ordered off tonight to suppress
he Cincinnati riot" The brave girl ner.
II fiinched beneath the shock of the in
eligence, but looking her lover calmly in