Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-04-26
BRIGHT BITS.

LASDLADY-'.It'a singular, but true, Mr..
CrOssgrain, that all my boarders remain win
me-" New BOarder at first meal)-"IOo weak
10 leave, guess, after the first week. The
Jsdse.
LITTLE FLAxES HAIR: Papa, it's raining"
Papa somewhat annoyed by work in hand;
'Well, let it rain" Little FlaXen HAIR
'timidly): Il was going te."-CtHctHnah
Enquirer.
a VARIETY Of bean is grown in Mexico
which Will jump several inches when taken
this country. The venerable restaurant bean
is too passiye.-BUrlingfoR Free Press.
THE spartans were renowned for their
courage, but even Spartan herolsm pales De
fore the courage OF the woman who has re
solved that her last years bonnet IS good
enough for this spring-Chieago IeIegraoa.
4 THIEyING young Pittsburg dentist has
elOped with the daughter Of Philadelphia
nabOb. and all the laughing gas ever used by
Of smile on the old gentleman's countenance.
-iiftsbHrg Telegraph.
Young BOsTONIAS, who has married
country wife: my dear am going down to
NJ. Arbesque's tOnsOrial parlors for few
minutes. >" She: "Oh, Charlie, dear, there isn't
anything the matter with your tonslls, IS
there;'-Burlingtoa Free Pres.
LAWYER BLANK was in his usual cynical
mood. II don't see how it is" he said, that
the devil always seems 10 get ahead Of the
Lord, notwithstanding you say the creator IS
all-pOwerful." IAN, but you forget" replied
the parsOD, ''that the devil has all the lawyers
on his side"
4 LADY reader writes to say that she has
been losing her hair recently, and wants to
know what she shall do to prevent it. Either
keep your bureau drawer locked, or else dis
charge the hired girl and get another OF
complexion differing from yours.-Roektdnd
Courier,
How hard it is to satisfy people, The new
cabs in New York are painted "black and
tan" and the color is criticised by thoughtless
people who do not understand that IT was
selected to strike terrier to the hearts OF the
hack drivers by indicating that the fares are
'dog cheap"
THREE handsome young lady dentists have
opened an Office in Chicago, and are rushed
with work. And they do say that when one
Of these fairies gets her arms around fellows
head and hugs him up tight and begins to yank
at "a tooth, il does not hurt one darned bit
BismGrck Tribune.
"ANY good shooting on your farm:n asked
hunter of farmer. "Slpendid." replied the
agriculturist, there's dry-well man down
in the clover meadow, cloth peddler in the
house, u candidate out in the barn and two
tramps down in the stock yard. Climb right
over the fence, young man, load both barrels
and sail in.'-TOledO BLADE.
A TEXAS couple were married by telephone
a few DAYS ago, and the fact speaks well for
Lone star State. As the telephone goes in
some places, couple could have been mar
ried. had an infant or two, and got a divorce
while the central Office was establishing a
Chicago Times.
MABEL-"D0 you try to observe the golden
rule Mr.. SicefellOwY" Nicefellow-.'Y es,
indeed. Do your" Mabel-"Yes: I always
try to do as | would be done by" NIcefellow
THAT is the right spirit" Mabel-"But
/ sometimes fail. If l were to try | should
fail now" NicefellOw-"Indeed. Why"
Mabel-'I am not tall enough to reach" No
cards.
He skipped into the sanctum with a step as
light as air:
a little pun original III read to you" he
said:
"The melon collie days have come, the saw
dust Of the year.
Bang. went the gun. He's sleeping now,
with daisies DER his his head.
Nm York .TOurU9I.