The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1884-08-23
MISCELLANEOUS.

Look at any long line of freight
cars and see the unequal build of them.
That is what renders safe coupling de-
vices abortiye and smashes SO many
brakemcn.--N Y Times.
In Stockton, Cal, few days ago.
two policemen arrested an old man for
stealing an orange. One of the police
men ate the orange, and the old man
got twenty-five days in jail.
Claude Montefiore, one of the
ablest and most liberal of English He
brcws, says that the Talmud is swiftly,
learned, far-fetched, practical, poetic,
ahrsb, kindly, long winded."
AN entire company of the Twelfth
Regiment, New York State Militia,
took the pledge few days since to
abstain during life from the use of in
toxicating liquor as beverage.-M Y.
Times.
Says Talmage: "a lite of mere
money getting is failure. You never
get rs much as you want" True, very
true, Mr. Talmage. We used to
think Sl0,000,000 would be sufficient;
now we want 500. 900, 000.-Boston Post.
"A quack doctor, who was giving
testimony in a San Francisco court, was
asked If he had ever performed the
Office of dccapitation. 80, yes" he
said; al have done that often" SAL
ways successful" "Never lost apatient
under il"
Effects of Brain Overwork," DIR. Will
lam A. Hammond says: IL do not
think that any form of exercise is as
good as walking. Horseback riding
comes next rowing next. = Chicago
Journal.
--As Mrs. James Dalton, aged seventy
five years, was attempting to obtain
water from cistern at her residence
in Rochester, n. Y, the other day, she
fell in but was rescued. About an hour
later her husband. aged seventy-eight,
a carpenter by trade, in attempting 10
repair the cistern, was precipitated
into it by the breaking of a plank and
was drowned. -Rochester Cypress.
--Norton'S IntelLigencer revives a
poetic squib written in 1907 by James
Monroe, who was afterward President,
as applicable to some of the votaries of
tobacco at the present day-young men
who ask permission to smoke in the
presence of ladies, knowing that re-
luctant consent may be expected:
Ills evening now; beneath the Western star
Soft signs the lover through his sweet cigar,
And fills the ear of some consenting she
With puifs of smoke and VOWS of constancy.
We have struck a new scheme. On
the green shade we wear over our eyes
when reading proof or grinding out
copy we have printed, Il am busy"
When a man that we don't care to talk
to comes in we stoop still lower over
the desk so that he can see it and take
the hint, but when the other kind of a
man, n good jovial fellow, comes in, we
push the shade up over our bald spot
where he can't read the legend, smile
versation by asking him for cigar
Louisville argus.
The steady application to legiti-
mate business, with untiring industry
and economy, will give comfortable
support, a quiet conscience and a
slowly increasing 'nest egg" for old
age and gathering infirmities. The
haste to be rich, whether it leads the
seeker into Wall Street or induces reck-
less dealing in business circles, is al
most certain to end in disaster. 1t is a
great pity that so many will learn this
only by tuition so costly that the
price overbalances the gain.-N Y.
Journal Of Commerce. = -
AT Western tea garden waiter
was required who could cut sandwiches.
The successful man used an old sword
blade as knife. He cut the slices so
thin that he had covered the floor of the
copcer-room before he got half way
through the ham. As he expressed his
Intention of covering the lawn and
gravel walks of the hugh tea garden
with the rest, the proprietor engaged
him on the spot, and actually wrote his
engagement upon what he thought was
piece of tissue paper, but which
proved to be one of the slices of ham
the waiter had cut.-Boston Post.
Senator Palmer, of Michigan, has
the reputation of giving the most elab-
crate dinners in Washington and takes
good deal of pride in it. His income
is large and he finds it difficult to spend
all of his money. He keeps ono house
in Detroit, another in New York, and a
third in Washington, and finds satisfac-
ton in entertaining his friends. His
hobby is dogs. One pet cost him ST.
600 and another $500, which was about
$3.50 pound. The Senator has the
finest cook in Washington, a French
man named Emile, to whom he pays
$1,000 a year for baking griddle-cakes,
and he has another man, at wages OF
$50 month, who does nothing but
look after the dogs Washington Post
The Origin Of Dixie.
I'm n Saturday n;oht in 1850 WHOM