, 1884-12-21
"TENDERF00T All LARGE.
He Rigs Out in Wild and Weird
TOggery
And Turns Himself Loose in The
TrackIess West.
Some Astonishing Sights Which He
Saw in Cheyenne.

Out in the Territories there are only
two classes-the cowboys and the tender
feet. Such OF the cowboys as are not
professional thieves, murderers and mis-
cellaneous blacklegs who fed to the 'front.'
Ter for reasons that require no explanation
are men, who, totally disregarding all the
amenities of Eastern civilization, brook no
restraint, and-Eearing neither God, man
or the devil-yield allegiance to no law
save their untamed passions. The tender
foot is their meat. They know no higher
pleasure than to use him for a target on
the slightest pretext, while their sense of
humor finds no greater qualification than
to p~erforate with bullets that tenderfoot
who inadvertently refuses to nominate
his pisen' when invited to do so. He is
the best man who can draw the quickest
and kill the surest. A cowboy who has
not killed his manor, to put it more cor
rectly, his score of tenderfeet-is without
character, or stand, or respect. The ten
derfoot who goes among them should
first double his life insurance, and then
be sure that he is well heeled.
| digested these suggestions and made
preparations accordingly. 1t would be
vastly better to appear on the plains in
the role of a cowboy at the. start, I,said to
myself, and come back with a whole skin,
than be transformed into an ele~emosynary
lead mine, and shipped home in a box.
Whereupon l straightway proceeded to
transform myself into a cowboy. an opera
ton that involved not a little time and in
genuity and a good deal OF money.
The wooden shirts l procured of fash
ionable haberdasher in Broadway, the ex-
pensive sombrero of a swell halter in Fifth
Avenue, the top boots of my regular man
in Twenty-third street, and a silver
mounted %seven-shooter and an intricate
implement combining shot gun and
rifle-barrels of a Fulton street dealer in
sporting good. In Chicago l added a
cartridge-belt, a rubber overcoat and a
compass to the collection. In Omaha |
invested in a murderous sheath knife, a
campbell and a revolver of larger calibre.
l also doffed my Eastern clothes and
donned my Western toggery, including
cartridge belt, knife, revolvers and all.
| was disappointed at not meeting any
any other cowboys on the Union Pacific
train; but | was rather iattered at the at
tention | received from the passengers,
who evidently had never seen one before.
As much for my benefit US for their edit
cation, | u once gave up the use of
English as she is spoke in the metropo-
lis. and adopted the vernacular OF the
p%rairies. Otherwise my appearance would
have made me simply ridiculous, Some
of the tourists on the train asked me
foolish questions. One of them wanted
TO know how many people | killed a week.
Stranger" said /, ''out in ourcountry
too much curiosity s an easy way of com
hitting suicide. You hear me2"
| knew he was scared. for | saw him
talking in low earnest tones with the con-
ductor n few minutes later. When the
conductor himselfpresently asked me with
a droll wink: Never ben fur West be-
fore, have yer 2" l know that he appre-
ciated the Joke as much as | did, and that
he took me for a cowboy off on Il little
lark.
BY this time half the people in the car
were looking in my direction, and the
other half, | felt sure, were ready to drop.
under the seats if any chance shots came
their way.
Nav, said |, Il never wrastle no
grizzlies TO give me an appetite for matu-
final hash. By the way, old hoss,' hack
ing off a quarter-section ofnavy plug with
my sheath knife as | spoke, and then
carefully placing it in my mouth. "how's
the h~emp-necktie matinees coming on in
Cheyenne? Stretched many tenderfeet
there in the last day or two?"
We'll" said the conductor, with great
deliberation, and in a voice that could be
clearly heard in the furthest end of the
car above the racket of the wheels: they
amt hanged nobody in Cheyenne as I've
heard of for going on two years. The
last fellow that ornamented a lamp-post
was run up because he was too blamed
fresh, and l wouldn't be terribly surprised
if the SAINT crowd that put him through
should be waitin' for this train to come
in"
1t was now evident that he was trying
to curry favor with the tenderfoot tourists
on the train, and, as they were sixty or
seventy to one, | maintained a s~cornful
reticence during the remainder of the trip
to Cheyenne, where | knew | would find
daredevil cowboys in the majority, and
tenderfeet in a scared, helpless minority.
Want to see a fair sample of my
hand writing. do YEP" said l, in a loud
tone, to the clerk of the hotel 7'Want to
know if | can take a tumble to the
school house racket Ell? You can
Just bet your last bob-tailed broncho
| can, dashing off my name as l spoke,
adding, as my place of residence. White
mans Country, and don't you forget it"
Quite a crowd Of well dressed gentle
men gathered around as the clerk. who
might have just stepped from the office Of
the Windsor, so far as appearance and
manner went, asked in well-bred sur
prise;
do you wish a room. sir2"
"Oh, | amt in no hurry" / said, in a
tone drawn from my boot heels, and
slAmming n of my revolvers on the
counter as | spoke. But if you run this
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