Seattle daily post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, W.T. [Wash.]) 1881-1888, 1884-07-13
ORR GR0wLER.

This mOlulhk NO N -
a. tound the old man absent. Sinking
:..o a chair to await his return. We no
,;.ad on bis desk bit of paper on which
-. vritten $50 Slow" Thinking j;
-. ;utended fer the old machine in the
.o,,sr and that it possibly might have
.one reference TO the approaching city
.,.c4;op. We dropped the words into the
hopper and began turning the crank and
read as follows:
m vss. in all reforms 60 SLOW,
And feel yonr way along;
II .ets Us many PAGES back
10 fpd we're in the wrong.
The too extremely radical
Possess but little worth
A teachers or reformers Of
The masses of the earth.
sorostiues the world may 20 too fast,
gometimes 1t goes too slow;
I Al mot like TO rush with ire,
No. cool too much with snow.
Ike stupid boys in public school,
We take our lessons hard;
Tbey must be given by the inch,
Net dealt out by the yard.
90 slow, but yet go straight ahead
Be sure you're IN the right;
Then turn not, heed not anv cry,
Bot keep your mark IN sight.
And work away with patience, friend;
The right will surely win,
And lessen, IL not eradicate,
Our follies and our sin.
There being nothing in this ditsy ORR
oiusl or local in nature, We pushed in,
hap hazard, one of the stops SO aa to
change the tune OF the old machine.
Forgetting TO give it q subject or text, IL
ran wild, as usual:
THE MODEST WOMAN.
heard Of woman,
Not thought to b silly;
Her name was not Daisy
IL might have been Lille.
A wonderful woman
She surely nust be;
Too pure TO be human,
So modest was she,
In presence of man,
Ii never could be
She would do anything
So terribly shocking
As juIsp out of bed
And pull on her stocking.
So modest being
Uf course is worth seeing.
She surely shosld 90
With Barnum's great show;
For woman so chaste.
Endowed with such taste,
Ia too pure to dwell long
With mortals below.
Here we crammed in another stop and
continued turning the crank. Soon we
noticed a terribly disagreesble smell,
Iomething like sulphur or rotten eggs.
Greeley used to speak Of the Satanic
PRESS" The odor which arose from the
I'D machine reminded us of visit we
made, many years ago, 10 one OF those
aud warned Us that
disagreeable was coming:
Hey diddls diddle,
The Herdid's a fiddle
Upon which you can play any tune;
Give II half dollar,
And loudly twill holler
For winters cold or summers June;
For cold or hot,
For left or right,
No matter what,
Bv day or night,
twill laugh or cry for fifty cents;
Twill twist and hop,
And squirm and flop
On either side of any fence.
A wonderful paper
To cut up a caper,
Dr. abuse any one, be he living or dead;
As a leader of thought,
IL oheap,y is bought
To dance in the air or stand on its head.
Here the Rrowler came rushing in with
desperate haste, exclaiminR:
"Great Caesar and Ben Rutlerl Have
you unoorked all the bottled up smells
VI Cologne, or have YOU been luuching
On Limberger cheese?"
We plead not guilty of either of those
rharges, but remarked, humbly, that we
we're experimenting with the old ma
ehine.
Don't you know, young man." sol
cmnly remarked the erowler. assuming
. serious tone and a tragic attitude, sit
will cost me two bits for carbolio acid 10
clesn and disinfeot that machine, after
the use you have Just put IL tor
We confessed with some trepida,ion
that We did not know that fact, but we
promised the growler We would rustic
around and soc il We could borrow two
bits for him. Making that an excuse,
ve hastily slipped out OF the door and
any further ebullitions Of his
wrath.