davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
The New Rich Of New Yorh.

The third circle of New York society
IS based on money-money alone-and
so freshly made as to contain clinging
odor of the manner of its making-not
always fragrant. Its members-are apt
to be vulgar, if from no other cause
from their pecuniary ostentation and
love of display. They have not had
wealth long enough to become accus-
toned to it; consequently they are rest
less in their desire to advertise q fact
which affords them so much shallow inn
portance. As rule, they are but half
educated, and their manners are defec-
| tive. They tend to noise, self-assertion,
and boastfulness; they rehearse their
lives, seldom romantic or enticing; thew
strut and swaggar from conceit and con-
seriousness of what they have accom-
plished. As money is their sole test of
worth and significance, they are not
squeamish as to the method of its OBJ
tainment, and they do not inquire,
therefore, too closely into the antece-
dents and record of the members of
their set. They form a kind of buffo
company whose pretensions and extrav-
agance would be diverting, if not repel-
lChbs lhCy nave SQOWleSJ
carriages in the park, the costliest
clothes, the biggest diamonds, the high
est voices, and the worst pronunciation.
They are forever advertising themselves
in every possible way by word of
mouth and by paragraphs in the news
papers. Their dearest ambition is to be
thought fashionable, and they are so
diligent to this end that, outsiders are
often made to believe them all that they
assume to be.
They are very fond of frequenting the
watering places. notably Saratoga
they do not affect Newport, where
Knickerbocker or Mayfower blood,
backed by big income, asserts itself
and of attracting attention by their
gaudy turnouts and their miscellaneous
prodigality. The members of other cir
cles vigorously avoid these shoddyites,
as they are commonly called, and the
shoddyites have, therefore, little society
save of their own sort. This always
annoys them, and they spend more Law
ishly than ever when they make an adj
vance that is repealed, being under the
impression that cash is social as well as
financial capital, and that its reckless
disbursement is passport to a better
circle they are always trying to
enter. 1t is their misfortune that they
can conceive of nothing higher or holier
than money, and the blunders they COM
NIT from this misunderstanding are
and momentous. If they were
fashionable the prejudice against fash
ion would not be without reason, for
they are odious to every one possessed
of self-esteem and delicacy.-N Y.
Cor. Chicago Tribune.
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
''Old 81" on Walking Matches.

Old 81 had accomplished one or two
extra errands and was disposed to call
attention to an ingrowing nail on one
of the toes of his off foot.
Speaking of toes and heels and such
soleful subjects, what do you think OF
walking matches, old manP" Clipped
in the sporting reporter.
"Well, amt got much stuck yit on
desc heah cirkus sort o walkin' matches
you young mems is habin' roun' town,
but walkin' matches is nightly favor
tie wild me eff dey is only de right kin
er ones. An Use pow'fu sorry I doan' t
see mo- foxes enterin' inter dem dan
dose desc days"
swell, what kind of matches do you
bet onP"
"Fustly, I likes to see men whar's
got good sicherwashuns an am trusted
wild udder folks money walkin' strate-
for'ard an tryin' ter see which kin
walk the mos uprightly. De man
whar goes in fer dat, squar heel an
toe, six days ebray week, won't nebber
be 'poted in de papers fer walkin' outer
town after dark an bo'din er frate
trane at er water-tank" 8.
''Good enough! What elseP" 3
''Den likes ter see desc men whaf
is all us tryin ter see how menny Laps
dey kin make roun' all de bar-rooms In
town widout restin' in one OBJ dem ter
take or drink. DE man whar keeps
pilin' up his sko' in dat walk won't
nebber be heer'd OBJ walkin' ter de
stashun house wild er figger 8 gait
twixt de police fer beetin' OBJ his Wife
er 'glectin' OBJ his chillun."
''Any morep"
can ! likes ter see all de big men an
bankers dat keeps de peoples konfi.
dence an monev walk outfrum 'monpst
de gamblers an break inter er run wen
dey pass by de grab-bag OBJ speaker
lashun. Ef dey do dat dey'll be
nightly tickled wen dey sees dere
rikord on de. Rhode of Heaben! tell
yer, boss, denis de walkin' matches dat
we wants ter make pop'la now days,
an wen | sees er man dat l knows ID
dom his laps an his miles in all OBJ dem
contes' yer'n purity soon ketch me close
up ter de pool-box dumpin' my munney
fer tickets wild his name spelt on 'em in
big red letters!"
Satisfied that this outburst would do
instead of the usual Saturday night
moral lecture, the old man closed his
eyes and went off into go-as-you-pleasa
sfternoon-nap. Atlanta Constitution
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
SCHOOL AND cHuRcH.

There are two thousand SCHOOL,
teachers in Arkansas, eight hundred or
whom are colored. Pittsburgh Post.
An .article In the Churchnsan by,
Bishop Coke, of Western New York.
tsstsns sDs0o aayO Church N S United
States the name of the Apostolic church
in America. ~ sl"g n9 ssls' sail
AN interesting Sunday-school con-
vention was held in Waterbury, Conn,
recently. 1t appeared from the repore
that In the State there were 1,037
schools; 1852 officers and teachers;
1S4, $40 scholars. Total membership,
16Z, 8Ol. ifi eaH ~ fGss OF
"A New York real estate man esti.
mates the wealth of Trinity Church at
$500, 900, 900. He says it Is certainly
as rich as the Vanderbilts, and has .
steadier line of profit. Besides it's i'm
mense propertyin the city it holds mort
cages on several hundred Episcopal
Churches all over the country.-M y
Sam. a if 49, ~ gEr
Underlying the forty-one acres
within the enclosure of Girard College
walls, Philadelphia, there are $500 feet
of tunnel. intersecting almost every part
of the grounds. At distances of zone
hundred feet apart there are gas gets.
which are lighted by electricity. The
tunnels are used for the pipes which
carry the steam and hot water TO- the
eleven buildings on the ground. PhiIa-
delphia Press. H'7t.H sas~
AT the annual meeting of Friends
recently held in England, Mr.. Rufus
King, of Baltimore, obtained the sane
ton OF the society for religious work in
the south of France, Mount Lebanon,
Australia, Tasmania. and New Zealand.
Mr.. Isaac Sharpe returned his certificate
after seven years mission, and gave
encouraging accounts of his work in
Africa, Australia, and the adjoining
islands, Madagascar, the United States,
Canada, Indian Territory, and Mexico.
MIR. Sharpe's certificate was renewed for
work in Norway. q Eitanm
"A comparative statement of the
various colleges, compiled by Mr.. Tay-
Tor Payne, shows that Harvard has
thirty-two professors and twenty-three
lecturers, instructors, tutors, etc.,
making total Of fifty-ive. Princeton
come next with twenty eight professors
and six lecturers, tutors, ETC., making
total ofthirty-four. Yale follows with
twenty professors, and ten lecturers,
tutors. etc., total thirty. Then follows
Columbia with total of twenty-nine;
Amherst, twenty-four, and Brown and
Wesleyan nineteen each.
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
French Ideas Of Americans.

French journalists of late have q
great deal to say of Americans. and dis
play much ingenuity in inventing anec-
dotes in what they conceive to be Amer
lean style. The absurdity of some of
these creations of the Gallo fancy de-
fies description. We translate a speci-
men or two for the amusement OF our
readers. The following ridiculous
stories are now 'going the rounds" of
the French press:
I'm our country" said an American
to q young English lord, who was
"doing America" as a part of his edu-
cation, ''in our country there are none
OF the prejudices of rank. You meet .
woman; she pleases you; you pay court
to her and marry her in an hourI'
IL will bet you two thousand guineas
that you do not marry in an hour
any lady here PRESENT. ar
''Done" replied the Yankee.
He glanced rapidly around the draw
ing-roOm of one of the chief hotels in
New York; perceiving charming lady;
presented himself; paid her some COM
pliments; gave an order to waiter,
who went out and returned with a
grave gentleman carrying q small
Bible; the group retired into a corner;
the grave gentleman scrawled certifi-
cate; the waiter signed it as a witness,
and the Yankee returned to the English
may, to whom he said:
ut is done, and has taken me only
fifty eight minutes''
The young lord gave him check,
and the newly-married couple disap-
peared arm-in-arm.
Extraordinary! Marvelousp' MUIR
INJURED the future English legislator,
half aloud. II
''Pooh! Not so very extraordinary
after ALL" said another Yankee, who
had observed everything. 'They have
been married two years, and you are
to my knowledge the sixth simpleton
upon whom they have played the same
trick!'
Here is another specimen: The mar
rage of son of President Arthur to
Miss Kate Beach is fully decided. The
ceremony will take place in two
months, and the young couple will pass
their honeymoon in Paris. -
''This," says the Paris paper, sis the
way in which, according to New York
journal, the two lovers made each
others acquaintance
''The young man was musing at the
seashore, when he saw pass a young
girl carrying basket of flowers, and,
as he is near-sighted to the last degree,
he took her for a flower-girl, and called
to her in a lordly tone:-
"'Approach fearlessly, my good girl!
Come and put q flower in my button
hole
''Miss Beach burst out laughing. At
this silvery sound the Presidents son,
perceiving his error, fell upon his
knees and lost himself in excuses and
compliments. His address finished, he
rose and wiped his knees with his
sleeves to get the dust of. Miss Beach
meanwhile escaped without replying.
He pursued her, and overlook, while
running, a friend of both, who intro
dnced them.
1.-THE united ages of the lovers make
but thirty-four years.
The French have long been noted for
their absurd delineations of John Bull
and his ways. They are now expend-
ng the same peculiar talent upon
Brother Jonathan, and with the same
success. Youths Companion.
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

What is the difference between q
woman who decks herself in many
knots of ribbon, and one who patiently
endures misfortunep One wears her
bows.and the other bears her woes
Albany Journal.
AT boarding-school one evening,
young Spaniarc, who had just begun
the study OF English grammar, wished
to be helped to some boiled tongue.
'.Miss," he said to the girl who sat at
the opposite side of the table, II will
thank you to pass me the language."-
Golden Days. ; lea-anDsi
-"I want a sign" said young man,
stepping into a painters shop. "What
sort of signP" asked the artist of the
brush. "a sign of rain. "'"All right"
replied the painter, as he dashed pail
of cold water over the would-be jokist.
Jersey CITY Herald. lali s.. su1la
$50 you think your son smokes, Mrs.
Jones?" '.I'm sure of il, Mrs. Brown:
I've found pieces of tobacco In his
pockets" 'Dear me! dear mel I'm
sorry. My son has no bad habits; l
never find anything in his pockets. but
cloves and coffee beans. "--ZanesuiUe
Journal. ssfa.a,I,
"A German clock dealer sold a small
clock to an Irishwoman, but he had
scarcely left the house when she turned
1T bottom upward, and wire dropped
from its position, causing the clock to
strike without intermissiOn. Thereupon
she ran after him, and complainingly
said' "Sure, an it's cryin' afther We
already.-N. Y. Ledger. ~,
Father" said young man who
had charge of the paragraph depart
ment of . college magazine, "Faistaff
was . very lat man. wssn't hep"
Eyes" HE was what you might call
corpulent." "Corpulence sounds big,
but it can DO spelled with four letters,
can't itP" ''No, it can't Have you
lost all your senseP" 20, yes, it can.
What's the matter with be tPn The
father will bring suit against the col
!ege for dwarfing his sons mind. -Ar.
kansGW Traveller. 4n gIo} w.
Two Sides to Sentiment:-
Wnen tw0-year-old May Blossom
DSm mes. down tN sI IN clear white dress,
And claims her sweet caress "
Inen Auntie takes mp Blossom
AND ner eyes they grow and shine.
III pretty baby blossom,
III you were only mineP' at
When Blossom, in the pantry.
High mounted on q chair
Has nibbled at the icing.
Till half the cake Is bare.
Then Auntie puts down Blossom
And her eyes they glow and shine.
~ naughty baby Blossom, '''~d
Ii you were only minei" .4
-EDchdn0e.
Mister" said a wien faced man
TO an uptown druggist, ..gimme a
quarters worth O. prussic acid, please
rIussic acid!'' yelled the druggist
why, man, it is deadly poison.
What do you want with prussic acidPs'
want nothin' with prussic acid,~
replied the man; want essence of va
,er,an. Other night man axed fur va
ierian out in Pittsburgh an got prussic.
acid. Didn't want to git none o. that
myself. SO 4 thought ef I axed fur thse,
I'd git valerian." He got the thin0j
hs wantad.-M y. NeUs.
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
Abyssinians.

b Seven out OF every ten persons met
with have some kind of disease, show
ing itself in sores and eruptions. No
doubt their excessive dirtiness spreads
disease more than anything else. The
women, for instance, wear simple
long gown, like an ordinary nightshirt,
originally whitehall state we have not
yet seen-but worn to various shades
of dirt, round about the neck-band be-
coming clot of black grease, caused
by the continuous plastering of mutton
fat on their heads to stifie the life that
is so easily set in motion by q filthy
condition of hair. The fashions of head
dress are various, some wearing their
hair short and curly like the men; and
men as well as women wear it in thin
plaits taken from the forehead down
back over the Uranium in corduroy fash
ion, but knotted on the nape of the
neck. Young girls will cut their scalps
close, leaving a halo of fringe termina-
ting in loose Atreamers behind. This is
indeed very pretty, especially round q
handsome face, which is not by any
means uncommon in Abyssinia; and, in
addition, drapery carelessly thrown
about their well shaped figures (worn
when their gowns are in rags) would
attract even the hardest-h hearted of our
mission, but for the usual, aswen as the
optical, knowledge of theta uncleanli-
ness. The men look little cleaner, hut
there are no other signs, the rancid
mutton fat impregnsting the atmos-
ps,ere wherever they may be- Cor.
La''do" Daily Ne'os.
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28

There is more nutriment in white
beans than in almost any other vege-
table that is placed upon the table. 1t
is said that there is as much nutriment
in enc bushel Of beans as there is In
four bushels Of potatoes.
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28

Most OF the foreign fruit brought to
this city comes from Central and South
America, the West Indies, and, the
Mediterranean. A large proportion Of
the oranges come from the West Indies,
and so do the bananas. The first ba-
nanas ever brought to this city were i'm
ported in 1904 by Captain John N. Ches-
ter, of the schooner Reynard. He
brought thirty punches. On the voy-
age the schooner fell in with three
French frigates in company, on one
OF which was Jerome Bonaparte, then
on his way to Baltimore to marry Miss
Patterson. The Captain presented q
bunch OF bananas to him. The re-
mainder OF the fruit on its arrival here
was purchased by the late Anthony
Crappau OF the old Fly Market at the
foot OF Maiden Lane. There is great
loss on green fruit imported from the
West Indies and Central America.
Sometime this is due to long and tenn
pestuous voyages, during which it is
fo6nd necessary to close the matches of
the vessels forhours together to prevent
the sea from entering the holds. It is
essential to have the matches kept open
the entire passage. On the other hand,
that portion of the fruit slowed upon
the decks of vessels is often seriously
injured by sea water. Pineapples have
to be slowed, in the holds of vessels dur
ing the rainy season each year, and yet
they are likely to spoil there because
there is no opportunity for the water to
dry out of the crown of each pine.
They soon heat and decay. and on their
arrival are thrown away.f
The growth of the trade has been
rapid in the past dozen years. 1t has
excited surprise in mercantile circles,
and capitalists who have been casting
about for chances to make investments
in new fields have at last found one in
the tropics. The impetuous rush of new
spectators, while it has been charac-
terized by little caution and much bold
ness, has given grand impetus to the
trade. The box fruit trade, being less
liable to the caprices of fortune than
the West India trade, has thrived pro-
digiously. The Importance of the trade
may be estimated from these figures.
The value of green fruit entered for
consumption at the port of New York,
from January l, 1888, to December 81,
1888, is exhibited in the following table:
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28

The dude-kifler has bser .rros+oa
in Brooklyn. He is only nine vaars 'S ia
but be explained to the Cnnrt that o II.
sole ambition was to exterm;nss s' a.. -.
dudeS.- Brooklyn Union " ~
Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1884-08-28
ESPECIALLY JIM"

1wus mighty good-lookin when was young
Peert am black-eyed an slim,
With fellers a-courtin' me Sunday nights,
= Specially Jim.
I The likeliest one of 'em all was he,
Clipper, an ham, som, an trim,
But tossed up my head an made fun o. the
crowd,
Specially Jiml
ISaid hadn't no 'pinion o. men,
n AMI Wouldn't take stock in him!
3 But they KEEP up a-comin' In spite O. my talk
, Specially Jiml
Igot 30 tired o. havin' 'em roun'
Especially JimD
! made up my mind I'd settle down
An take up with him.
So we was marriedo one Sunday in church,
Twas crowded full to the brim;
Twas the only way to get rid of 'em all,
Especially Jim.
The Centlry
The Evening critic., 1884-04-07
LA NSBURGH & BRO.
The Deatn of Mrs. Karl Kuubers.

The circumstances attending the death OF
Mrs. Kullberg, the wife of Mr. Karl Kullberg
on Saturday last, were, In many respects, Pc
culiarly sad.
Only two or three years ngo she came 10 this
city from Sweden n happy bride, and there was
every promise Of long life and happiness for
herself and her husband.
Last summer the deceased lost an interest
ing babe, and shortly thereafter tho bereaved
mother was taken sick and her Illness soon
developed Into q case OF rapid consumption,
the ravages OF which the most tskillful medical
treatment and the most tender nursing by her
devoted husband failed to stay.
She bore her eufferings with great f0rtitude,
but In the curly winter felt that her end was
not far of, and her great yearnng was 10 live
until this spring when It was her husbands
purpose to take her to her homo In Sweden In
order that she might die among her kindred.
But 1t was decreed otherwise. She died In
strange land, far away from tho mother she 80
much desired to see. She Will return %
this month with the bodies OF his wife ana
babe, and lay them TO rest In tho family vault
beside the dust OF the Kindred that have gone
before. The bereaved husband has tho we'll
deserved sympathy of a very large circle OF
friends, and he has tho satisfaction of know
ing that his wife suffered very little In the
last few days of her life; that she was re-
signed TO her fate, and that she died peace
fully and happy and full OF the Christians
hope
''You called me here" said tho minlstee
TO her husband after her death,
''to console her, but she gave me
Christian consolation. Tell her friends she
was not afraid to die" x.xt5
The Evening critic., 1884-04-07
"The Critiev wants 10 Know-

Why millions OF surplus is Kept IN tho
Treasury when 1t affords constant tempta.
tlon to Congress TO engage IN reckless leglsla-
ton and TO mako lavish appropriations.
Whether, as Frank Langston has been In.
dicted, greater effort should not now bo made
10 capture him.
Why the bill for the free bridge at the Three
Sisters 10 not pushed more vigorously In both
the Senate and House.
When the improvement Of tho eastern sec
ton OF the city 10 to begin.
Whether It is really possible for an account
ant, no matter how skillful, to get an intelll'
gent idea of the condition OF the District books
after an examination ~ only three hours.
How long Congress Will keep up the agita-
lion OF the depot question without settling It.
Whether Congressman realize tho fact that
they are very far behind with the work OF the
session.
Whether We are to have another overhaul
ing of District affairs.
The Evening critic., 1884-04-07

story is published In Chicago to the effect
that Chief OF Police McGarrlgle and two or
three detectives In 1882 obtained the pardon
OF Lewis O. Sweigel, who was then serving
tenn in the Chester (lll) penitentiary, and
who had told them In confidence that he, In
conjunction with others, had stolen A. Il. Stew
rlgle, the detectives and Swoigel then formed
II syndicate and restored the body TO Judge
Hilton for $4,000. McGarrigle admits tho
general details OF the story, Including Swell
gels pardon and negotiations in Now York,
but says sweigel trified with them, and that
the negOtlallons We're brOken on.
The Evening critic., 1884-04-07
MR.. KEIFER WORRIED
About the Report 10 he Submitted
by the SDecini Committee.


In a cloasroom OF the House on Friday there
was conversation between Mr.. Hopkins, OF
Pennsylyanla, who was chairman of the COM
mittee which Investigated the charges against
General Boynton apd General Keifer who pre-
fericd these charges.
Mr.. Keiter was at 1rst very loud and como.
what denupciatory. II is understood that he
practically accused Mr.. Hopkins OF unfaIrness
in the majority report OF the committee, and
Of trying 10 get snap judgment on him In GU
deavoring 10 have the House consider the mat
ter last week.
Mir. Hopkins answered General Keller In IN
unmistekable manner. He denied most em-
phatically entertaining any desire TO troat
Keifer with any but the utmost fairness.
Keller cooled down under Hopkins emphasis.
Mr. Hopkins also said thath would not call
the matter up until tho middle of this week.
Keller was in conference Saturday with his
counsel, Mr., Coleman. He was also trying to
rally the Republican leaders OF the House to
stand by him against the adoption OF the Hop
kins report. A
The Evening critic., 1884-04-07

EVERY newspaper in the country, ire
spective of political faith, feels pleased that
the underground railroad attempt to
usurp the position of the american Register in
this city met with disaster, as Saturdays
suit evidenced, and produced in full the de-
tails of the inner workings of the endeavor
Our neighbor, the Register, has entered
upon its third volume in the fullest vigor
ofcirculation and success, and will continue
so as long as the principles of the Demo-
cratic party require advocacy-and that
promises to be an extensive period OF time.
The Evening critic., 1884-04-07
.sTho critic, wants 40 Soc

Unnecessary ana burdensome taxes abol.
ished.
Early action takon toward tho passage OF a
free bridge bill.
The District Committee carefully and pa.
tiently consider the necessity OF It before or
dering an Investigation OF District affairs.
The best men selected as delegates 10 the
Chicago Convention from the District.
quiet and orderly meeting OF the Republi-
can delegates at Willard Hall tomorrow.
In fact, such meeting as viii give tho lie
to reports that political assemblages IN this
District are mere mobs.
The sprlng.llke weather OF yesterday con.
tlnue,
whether Judge MacArthur's recent ruling
Will not diminish the number OF diverce cases
In this District.
SUCH weather on the Potomac as Will enable
our fishermen 10 make money and at the Same
neh.