Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-07-07
BRIGHT BITS.

'FIvE thousand molecules can sit comfort
ably on the point Of pin" Herein the mol
ecule differs materially from man.-N0rrts-
torn Herald. .
"WHAT is the name Of your cat, sir?' His
name was William" SAID the host, until he
had fits. Since then we have called him
Fitzwilllam. THE AatnaGI Kingdom.
MARY ANDERSON says she could not love a
man who did not possess the highest mental
attainments. Oh, come now, Mary, stop
Philadelphia cal.
A SOUTHERN Judge decides that husband
can 'strike his wife three licks with a switch
and escape punishment" He can do the
same in the North, provided he uses her own
switch.-9'hilddeLDAfd cal.
SAN American lady married to an Italian
prince year ago has left him." We suspect
her fortune became exhausted, and she was
too high toned to go out scrubbing and wash
ing to support him.-NorriStOa0R Herald.
DELMoNIoO said: "Yery few people under
stand how to cook water" We should think
the best way would be to boil it. Still some
people may prefer it roasted or fried. It's
purely matter OF ste.-Phftddetphfd Call.
A PENNSYLVANIA MAN fell dead a few DAYS
ago while kneeling in front OF a sofa. He
was probably looking for his slippers and the
shock of finding that his wife had left them
where he put them caused his death.-BOstOn
Post.
''OH. I'm so unhappy exclaimed the re-
Gently married Mrs. Cuddlecup. "Why, my
dear, Pm astOnished to hear you say so. Is
Mr.. c. quarrelsome?" ''NO, that's the trouble;
you can't get quarrel out of him, and we
don't have single makeup. '-Pittsdur0
Chronicle.
Mrs. B.-"Yes.' Mrs. A-'Is it worth GO
ing to seer" Mrs. Bob yes, indeed, de-
cidedly." Mrs. A.-"What impressed you as
being the most noteworthy feature the ex
hthf MUa Uaofas
1rdNScFpt.
FRAUDS have been discovered in the Bureau
of Medicine and Surgery Of the Navy Depart
ment. If the Treasury" is to be ''bled" at
all. it seems eminently proper that the opera
ton should be performed by the officers of
the Bureau of Medicine and Surgery.-NoT-
ristOa0n Herald.
AN Ohio man has Just remarked the wife
from whom he was divorced eight years ago.
He proved to her that he had quit snoring,
and she demonstrated that she had learned to
make good bread. OF course when the points
of their mutual disagreement had vanished it
was natural that they should try to live to-
gether again.-PhilddeLphia Chronicle.
Mr.. WoODALL, in his excellent speech in
favor of female suffrage. spoke of marriage
vocation, at which some hon. members
laughed eOnsumedly. Our one cynical con-
course the brute deserves to be- says that ''no
doubt many married men wish It were
solitary vocation" Mr.. Woodall, of course,
meant ''sole" when he sand SOLITARY. FIN.
''BLAINE is like Henry Clay Of old,''
Says one who cannot feel
The difference 'twXt the common mold,
Aud pure Damascan steel.
When Blaine's like Harry of the West,
You'll never see the day;
But when he's dead and gone to rest,
He then may-tarn to Clay!
-NdshoilLe World.
80. WHAT is that? o, mamma, see,
1t squints its CLASSY eyes at me;
II mods. and grns, and twirls its sticks
do believe the thing is sick!'
"COme, little dear, do not be rude,
Nor cling so closely to my side;
The thing Is nothing but dude
1t couldn't hurt you if it tried"
philadelphia CAL.
THE robins know it, and the bees,
This idyl of the apple trees;
The sunshine and the laughing hours
Crowned all their hOary heads with flowers,
Then drifted down an eddying mass
OF snowy fragrance on the grass:
The little Pickering shadows went
This way and that, in sweet content;
And shimmering sunbeams touched with
grace;
Subtle and tender all her face;
While softly as a hayward breeze
He kissed her meath the apple trees.