Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1884-06-25
"BIoody BILL. the Terror"

"Whoop-la, whoopl'' thundered a
hairy, herculean, heavily-armed terror
of terrible fellows, as he kicked open
the rickety door Of the ''Frontier
Saloon" and glanced threateningly
upon the quiet crowd within. With a
defiant swagger, and many horrible
oaths, he advanced to the bar and said:
SLOWS biz ter-day. Toddymanp"
"Dull, Bill, dull. Can't yer hep me
out?n
"Of co'se 1 can-an' will, )" answered
the terror.
Turning, he called out to the loafers
scattered about the room:
'COme up hyer, come up, yer d
coyotesl an treat yo'se'fs, an me too,
at yo' own expense. That's right" he
continued, as the ten or twelve persons
addressed sprang nimbly from their
keg perches and smilingly expressed
their willingness to accept any invita-
ton, however worded, the said terror
might extend.
''Hump erlong, an in a
hurry" he growled savagely as he noted
ole solitary exception to the unanimIty
of the acceptances, cor, by the crook of
my elbow, I'll hurt yer; hurt yer bad. !"
The single exception, however, quiet
ly retained his seat, and neither by
gesture nor speech did he show the
slightest consciousness Of the presence
and the language of the most famous
and Infamous, desperate, and dreaded
devil that had ever frightened a western
Sheriff into temporary civility.
Great was our terror's am cement,
and greater his wrath, when .ie became
convinced that it was actually the ia-
tentiOn Of the rash stranger to ignore
him and his mandatory invitation. With
huge, self-acting revolver in hand, he
started toward him. As he approached
nearer, the silent unknown uncoiled his
long legs and extended himself gradu-
ally upward, and upward, and upward,
until at last he presented to our aston
lshed vision the towering form of the
tallest and thinnest mortal We had ever
seen.
When within two or three feet of him
the terrier paused and said: II gives yer
tn understan' that IN Bloody Bill
the terror of sheTrufs an the pattern
saint of uhdertakers. Dyer hear me?"
"Oh, yes; Pm not deaf" was the
reply, in cool, steady voice.
can I'm the favorlte and the rival
of de'th and dOckters," continued the
desperado.
"First-rate record, that, " was the ap-
proving reply.
I'm a jumping Jumbo-I'm the very
fe'ther that broke the campbell's back
I'm Texas steer stampeded-l'm a
curnel straight from Arkinsaw-an',
-- yerI look out, fur I'm gOin'
ter shOOtn" simultaneously with the
elevation of the revolver. the strangers
foot flew forward and upward, the ball
meant for his heart went crashing
harmlesSly through the roOf-and then,
with rapidity of movement that gave
to his russell brOgan the appearance of
chunk of lightning in mighty hurry
he kicked Bloody Bill under the chin,
behind the ear, in the stomach, in the
back, on the chin, with first one foot
and then the other. and SO effectually,
too, that the astOnished and thoroughly
shocked man-eater found it impossible
to use single one of the half-dOzen
"NNHOAiS dlldCiltu " ulS btil. l)Ll bllC
terror was really brave, and he strug-
gled pluckily to uphold and preserve the
Sangulnary reputation so dear and pro-
htable to him, until his slim and supple
antagonist finally terminated the fight
by dOuble-footed kick that stretched
Bloody Bill prone and breathless upon
the fioOI.
When restored TO consciousness he
approached the great unknown and
said:
Eur The las'-but. fust, what shall
call yer? Gener'l-doOk-prisidint?"
''Plain mister" said the other.
"Whatl Yer a plain mister!'' ex-
claimed the terror, incrdulously
''JuSsC."
"All right, all right, sence you say SO;
yer deserve promOShun. Now, mister,
fur sum years I've tnot l was whole
menag'ry in myself-lyon, elefint, wulf,
an all that-but I'll be burned eff hit
don't look tel day like I'd been TunnIn'
a two-bit sideshow all erlong. Eff ar
greeyble, Sill, I'd like tn larn who an
what yer air."
81" replied the stranger, in !. deep,
grave voice, ''am the Great Amerikin
Mule.n
'Then, God be thanked, gasped the
trembling terror, that yer didn't have
on yer run Shoes"