Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1884, 1884-02-08
rRuRUNE TWlNKLEs.

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TRIBUNE TWlNKLEs.
IT IA denied that New York has the olack "e''
alex. The worst thing it has got is George Fran
tic Train. II
M,rnrsorA man has invented machine 1or
,;oht;na a fire without getting out OF bed iol'
roh. lean wear of half it's terrors.
Moss,aNoR CApE1 says that every woman VINO
IA. n..eed tho age of thirty and il still unmar-
~;ed onoht to be nun. What nunsense!
r,,,, .s+o+a of a man who died in 18OO is ap~
nroaohine a final settlement IN fnllaoe'pnl"'
Il takes a Philadelphia lawyer TO rusn "s'''oi''
IT is reported that Governor oleVe'ano n'''
gone to bed sick. How foolish ne ls 10 o7'le'o
all he sees in the papers. He should not "oits
An exchange saws that society ladies are no"
engaged in response work. We oon Ano"
what response work is, but it must oe oeleo'-
full.
The girl graduates of Girton College nave
formed fire brigade and say they WILL nave
cardinal or striped hose for the engine OF tney
won't squirt.
cpxrRA1, GRANT and Queen Victoria have not
vet exchanged sympathy over their "ounoSo
tnees. If they have, the fact has been kept 11o"
the press in some manner.
AIMEE tells a reporter that she wears out sb5oV
worth of stockings every year. earea' ooohia'e''
she must have hard-shen bunlons on nee iee'
like Bismarck bachelor!
prcK,s Sun says it requires the slaughter OF
e0oO 600 pigs every year to supply the demand
f,r al,ioator leather, and Peck is super1ntenoene
IF q Sunday school and daren't tell lie.
A MAN who was sent to q Dakota town 10 star'
. nevsnaoer found an old maid society there IN
exce,lent working order. His report to the nome
office was: "Field more than nlleo aireaoy'
EMMA ABBorr says "she has fallen IN love
with great many pretty glrls IN nel nA0' D1'
never the least bit with a man." Whas ooes Aii'
Emma Abbott think of this startling coniea7'o"'
.arvr ma = sonp" ths soldiers said
G To the woman from over the hnlne-
y she opened the cavernous gap in her neao
;. And warbled "Das Baby Uf Nine
q waAr ia the difference between dude ana
dead man? There is no answer 20 tnls couun-
Breakfast Table, 1es'
tha-e ;s. in our book. The difference Is tnas
..o ,.o-,d haa some respect for dead man.
The Chicago Svornost very pertlneh''s TO-
,,arks. "Na draze Texas st. Louis panu]e s'a' :
In zr;zancu. ktera sc rozsirila az DO A1kansasu q
novosr a hroli byti velmi urputnou spo]enl
tam,i1:;u prekazkzejici." Persons VINO na'e
heen holding differently will now see their error
ur,pv WARD BEEcHEK's assertion that 1our-
sx4hs of the inhabitants of heaven are women
a,,,a o,mo.t lead one to believe that none but
.ho.o vho have died in the Mormon faith nave
oone there, Some undue influences mus' nave
been brought to bear on Henry when ne V's''eo
Salt Lake.
mur Providence. r. T., detectives who have
been endeavoring to catch the coal dealers ~
o;v;no short weight, have been shre"dly oa"eo
At every turn, They have reporteot 10 neao
tar. that the bible was correct IN saying: LUG
:... oe prov;dence are mysterious, and past
finding out"
A CORRESPONDENT asks if it ia healthy to sleep
Lo+,,.., feathere. It is, sir; decidedly healthy
rho chicken of the early spring which you eat az
vonr boarding house slept all OF its lie between
fe.thers and have you not noticed tnat II IL
,o.,.h,, +ouoh. robust and of iron frame. Alas!
it is too healthy!
rr,, ,,eon,e must be supplied with light and
..,..-+.;n;no literature during these long winter
Baltimore firm has just mailed
aeventeen tons of almanacs' on eaon page u
,vb,ch can be found an invalusoie essay on
,,orms and a perfect storehouse OF CLASSIC "ir'n
If antediluvian mustiness.
- .s"YEs" she said to her escort as 'ney snoeo
a7as the rink. II do love roller skating. when
-, s,e sailing around this way my very soul
seems to be floating away toward heaven ana-
Rv some mistake in the programme AZ tnla
ro;nt both of her soles foated away to"alo
haa zen. while the rest Of her smote the eartnlS
floor with mighty smite.
New YORK paper says that q man VINO mas
invented three lightning rods is living in poverty
and obecurity in Detroit. 1t may be added tnat
large number of men who peddled llentnlne
rods are now living in obscurity in the sient
tomb or are going about the country on crutcnea
and playine themselves for veteran SOLDIERS IN
+orch,;oht PROFESSIONS or Fourth OF July oem-
nstrations.
ctr Won had your wish,' he said to the MAID
The maid who from Boston came
s.Ard the dearest thing on earth would be lao
A. your feet, what gift would you manner"
!. moment she sat in reflective thought
while her mind flew to other scenes,
Then replied: II would wish for great o'e po,
And