The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1884-05-14

matter. She is afraid your hobby
might interfere with business, Isup-
pose
Yes, that's it, . 1 said, only two
glad to jump at this straw in the
way of explanation, and Culpepper
shortly after took his leave. With
terror | anticipated the inevitable
explanation with Mrs. Jones hut it
was postponed, for I found she had
taken up her quarters in the spare
room for the night. NV hair is now
gray, with years or otherwise, NOR
grew it white in single night, as
men have grown through sudden
fears" But | am quite surprised
that it didn't.
The next morning Mrs. Jones
came down to breakfast with her
bonnet on.
Where are you going, nay dear ?"
| ventured mildly to inquire.
Il am going with you, Mr.. Jones.
to the Fisheries Exhibition"
] felt that | was going to still fur
ther shame and exposure, but there
was no help for it.
We reached South Kensington in
solemn silence. Like condemned
criminal just scrswing up his cour-
age for the final attention of the late
Mr. MarwoOd. followed Mrs. Jone.
to the Museum department. We
enter the gallery glanced, involun-
tarily, to the spot where according
to Culpeppers account, my great
catch ought to have been. Great
heavens what did | behold! A
handsome show case, surmounted
by the name of Mamaduke II. Jones,
in large gold letters, and containing
stuffed fish of various sizes and de-
scriptions, the ceatre object being a
monster pike. | felt that reason
was tottering on her throne. Had |
really caught all that fish and didn't
know it Was | somnambulist with
a double existence, catching fish
(and sending them to the Fisheries
Exhibition in my sleep and forget
ting all about it in my waking
hours a? The revulsion of feeling was
too much for mel fell or the floor
in a dead faint. How long so con-
tinued [ cannot say, but | preseatly
came too myself and found a small
crowd round me, and Mrs. Jones
holding a large and powerful smell
ing bottle to my nose. / heard an
excited whisper, That's the gent az
ketched all them fish; he don't look
it do hep" Mrs. Jones perceived
that l was reviving; she said: 1--WE
will defer explanations, Mr.. Jones.
We had better go home" And we
went home accordingly, in solemn
silence as We came.
On my arrival / found two letters
sent up from the office. also a copy
Of the Fishing Gazette. The first let
ter was from my friend Brown, and
ran as follows:
DEAR JONES That pike of yours
trs created a regular controversy in
in the Gq7stte. | send a copy for
your persuai; the most contrary
opinions prevail as to the way you
caught him. Some maintain ysu
threw in Thames style, some in Not
tipgham. You are reported to have
used no less than seven different
kinds of fight, includidg two that
nobody ever heard of. Some say
your catch was made at Tenbury,
some at Newbury. You arereported
to have used Il goge-bait; a live
bait, and a spinning bait; and one
idiot declares that you spin with a
live bait The funny thing is that
all these statements are said to be
made on your own personal anthor-
ity. Do, for goodness sake, drop
the editor a line and set them right.
Yours ever,
HUMPHREY BROWN"
"PwMBWLYGWLLwTH North Wales.
'SIR: | think of all scoundrels
the man who, at a safe distance,
deliberately appropriates another
mans distinctions is the meanest.
| find that you have taken advantage
of the accident of possessing the
same name as myself Ia name OF
which | shall henceforth be ashamed.
since you share it) to take the credi-
of my recent fishing success, as ment
toned in the Gazette. ! write by
this post to the same paper to ex-
pose your contemplate conduct, and
trust | may have an early opportu-
nifty Of pulling your nose.
"MARNADUKE Fl. JOKES"
Here then was the solution of the
mystery. There was another Mar
maduke II. Jones, solicitor, and he
was the real Simon Pure, the hero
of the big fish. But to live at such
an unearthly place as Pwm-thing
umy-no wonder | could net find
him in the LAW List" / took up
the book once more and looked out
the disgusted little place. There he
was sure enough. So simple, and vet
so terrible, was the explanation of
my mystery.
l have confessed all to Mrs. Jones,
and she has graciously agreed. as |
did not really catch any fish after
all, to look overit this once. | have
written an abject apology to my in
fHriated namesake, who has taken
no notice whatever of it and now by
Mrs. Joness advice, | drew up this
plain, ,unvarnished statement, to place
the matter fairly before the public,
and to rehabiliate, as far as possible,
my damaged reputation. One word
| would say in conclusion. / notice
that a popular writer in q current
novel has made his hero wrongfully
take the credit of another mans
book. | do not mean to suggest
that this is as bad as taking the
credit of another mans fsh-in fact,
from recent observation. | should
say that it would be regarded. at
least in sporting circles, as a very
mild otfense in comparison. But /
am quite sure that that popular
writer, if he is kindhearted man, (as
| have no doubt he is will be posi-
lively appalled,, as he goes on, at
the amount of misery he will bring
on his unfortunate hero. L do i'm
IL -. a. L Il