Grand Rapids morning telegram., 1884-12-04
BARBER PHILOSOPHY.
Why Sensible Men Don't Shave
in Winter.
A New Kind Of CrinatOry Adornment--
The Mother Hubbard" whtsker-A
Late London Agony Aneeted By
Dudes ct id Omne Genus.



keepers and BARRIERS never see dull times"
remarked Clark street barber as he made
several preliminary clips at the reporters
foreiock; . but | am telling you differ
ent. We have our ups and downs just
like the hardware and dry-goods men. In
summer, for instance, We generally shave
two hundred men day here, but to-day
l have had osly about seventy five in, and
l don't suppose fifty more will show up
before we close. For the next six or seven
months We won't average more than one
hundred and fifty customers day. Just
little higher, please There now,
st-e-a-dy."
The reporter settled himself in his new
position, and the man continued:
- Lots of men begin to let out their
boards about now. The middle-aged men
want TO be comfortable, and a beard is a
big protection to the throat Shaving
cleans off the dirt, and hair and dead skin
from mans face and leaves all the pores
open, SO that, when he goes out of hot
barber shop in the cold air he is bound to
catch cold in spite of all the bay-rum you
can put ON. More clean-shaved men have
throat trouble and catarrh than those that
grow boards in the winter. The young
dudes who can raise boards let them out so
as TO look stylish and Englishy. The very
latest tony thing, you know, is a Mother
Hubbard beard"
The reporter interpolated gasp of won
der in the barber's stream of conversation
as he questioned: 'What is thatr'
"If you want Mother Hubbard whis-
~ fko Of tha
''keep your sides and chop whiskers cut
short down to within an inch and half of
your chin, where you let them grow long.
Then train and trim this long part into the
shape of an inverted half moon; fix the
long ends so that they point about for your
armpits, and you've got Mother Hubbard
beard. They are the swell thing among
the London dudes for this winter"
Are full boards to be the fashion this
winter, do you mean?"
That's about the size of it. / guess I
have had more young fellows asking me
about how long their boards would take to
grow, whether l had any invigorator to
help out the hair just below the lips, or
how to train and part whiskers, than l
ever had before. Here's a French arrange
ment / got in week ago fo- training
boards when they are starting," taking
something resembling David's sling made
of rubber from the shelf. 81 have sold ten
of them since the lot got here from New
York"
SHOW do they work."
''The rubber, you see, is made to fit
the chin and jaw. That seam in the mid
die goes right up and down where you
want your beard TO part. When a man
uses this he must first put a little wax on
his chin whiskers when they're about one
inch out and then fit that seam down the
middle of his chin and throat. When he
goes TO tie those strings behind his head
the rubber stretches and pulls back the
hair so that it sets towards his ears, just
in the right shape for a dude whisker. If
q fellow follows these directions for five or
six nights he will have the hair on his face
fixed so that it won't need hauling, and
pulling, and brushing into shape. Besides,
a man by using this can look respectable
with only two-weeks' growth on his face,
and his beard viii. appear to be a full
growth cut back"
''I should think that the strain on mans
chin would be too tiresome for the machine
to be practicable"
SO, no. Just put one on for few
nights in succession and you can sleep
while your beard is being trained. 1t saves
all the pulling that ruins beard. You
get the habit of pulling and twisting your
whiskers when you're starting 'em, and
you will never get over it. You'll keep on
pulling and twisting till you split the hair
out at the ends, and then your whole beard
VIII get ragged and stubbed like gam
bler's mustache. Too much trimming,
oftener than once in two weeks say, makes
beard stiff, while too much combing or
lingering splits the hairs and stops their
growth. Lots of men say to me after
shaving off beard they have been fussing
with all winter; What makes my face so
soreY Ever since | shaved my neck
chafes,' etc. your harris split always
tell 'em. They have rubbed and twisted
the hair together, you see, till it is all split
up so that when they shave it back into
the skin il splits before it can grow out and
curls in under the skin. Half of the men
with chafed necks and broken out faces
can attribute their trouble to just this
cause. O, this French business will be an AL
thing after people get hold of the notion
that 1t is as much of n business TO raise
a beard "A it is TO make shoes. or--or--''
and the barber paused for breath while he
tried To subdue the reporters unruly scalp
lock.
"what did you mean when you spoke
about a gamblers stubby mustacheYr
swell, you know these phrenologists say
that they can tell what kind Of fellow
they have hold Of BY feeling Of his hair. II
il Is silky they call him refined. but if 10 IL
rough they say that he Is no good. Now
say can tell q good deal about a man by
the way he keeps his whiskets. A nervous
man nearly always has n short. stu bby.
and chewed. up nustaebe. Gamblers mus.
tachee are about always that way. Watch
soms ~ 'em at n faro or reulette table
some tiIue. and youu eptice that when the
donl,ie-naueht green scoops their pile or
they cupper the ace at the wrong tirpe the
musfaeho has - catch IL n they're ia
4 -. 81. 4. a.