Morning journal and courier., 1884-08-08
POSITIVE.

Positive, cash; comparative, cashier; su- perlative, Canada. New York Journal
 A man in Milwaukee has written poultry book of 200 pages, regular hencyclop@dia as it were.-Boston Transcript.
 When you visit Dodge City, Kan, and hear the bullets whizzing around you will know why it is called Dodge City.-Philadel- phia Call.
 Cable despatches have considerable to say about the ''mudir of Dongola," and ignore the fadir entirely Dongola's mudir evident ly wears the breeches.-Norristown Herald
 We are told Esno two after-dinner coffee cups should be the same" After set has been handled by the hired girl any length of time they are not the same, either.-Graph- ic
 'fWhere are all the young men?" asks a feminine watering place correspondent They are in the city having good time with the girls who stayed at home.- Philadelphia Call.
 Job is always quoted as the personifcation of patience, but we wish it distinctly under stood that Job never spent his weeks vaca- tion at the seashore where it rained six of the seven days.-Boston Post. F'There is too much calorie in that soup'' remarked the bald-headed boarder to the blonde waiter. "Indeed there isn't" was the indignant reply, flor we never put any of that stuff in."-On City Derrick.
 Some young ladies at the seaside wear around their straw hats a twist of common hay. The young donkeys who ogle these young ladies regard the new caprice as a per sonal insult.-Norristown Herald
 'sNo," said a fond father, ''no, my son, you cannot have a quarter to go to see the catamount. Last year you had fifty cents to see the lion, and anyone who sees a lion sees what the catamounts to in the highest development of the species. "-Boston Tran script.
 "Are you hurt?" shrieked a dozen picnick- ing females as a young man tossed over neighboring fence by angry bull and landed on his head in the middle of the road. ''Hurt?'' he answered. ''Why, of course not; I am used to coming down that way" "Used to it?' exclaimed the fair chorus. "Why, how can that be?' ''I own bicy- cle, was the reassuring reply.
 Hard Times.-''Aint yer got CT ole coat yer could gin a DO pusson?" said an old ne gro, applying to the house of a well known. citizen ''Shall take it off and give it to you?" ssNo, sah, doan' like dat rip un'er de arm Wanted CT Sunday coat, but ez yer air so particular, reckon I'd better move on. 'C1ar ter goodness, de times is getting hard dat CT cul1id gennerman is bout ter be lef' in de 1urch."
 'tNo," said Fogg meditatively, 'I don't fear what may come to me in another world; it is the act of dying that fills me with sort of nameless dread 1 don't like the idea of crossing the dark river. I always was afraid of water, you know.n ''You shouldn't let that worry you," replied Mrs. F.; you'd have splendid chance to dry your clothes when you reached the other side. "-Boston Transcript.
 Sweet is the voice of the maiden fair;
 Bright is the glow of the rising moon; Soft are the zephyrs that stir the air;
 Loud is the blast of the trombones tune. The maiden will sleep ere the morning gray, The glow of the moon will fade away The zephyrs will die when the night is gone, But the blasted trombone will still play on.
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