The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-08-30

porter who grabbed my neat portmanteau and
took it to be labeled with a filthy patch Of blue
paper with paste on ito its utter ruin-took
Is cents moro; total, Sc rs; grand total, $237 So
When Fgot to Euston square figured up
what my comparatively brief trip in the North
western had cost me 1t amounted, tips" and
all, to $18 Tally, therefore, $255.50.
A porter called a cab for me-25 cents. The
cab took me to the rooms recommended to me
by friend near the Strand-$L Il was grow
ing downy already in the matter of cab fares)
My lunch in restaurant which wouldn't be
tolerated on Sixth avenue cost me $1.60; the
Policeman who directed me to it took % cents,
and small boy complacently pocketed another
70 cents for showing me how to use the door
knocker when he saw me searching desperately
for the familiar bell of my new lodging house;
total, So. 80. Tally for all so far $258. IS.
went Immediately to bed both to get little
necessary sleep and evade the exactlons or the
universal British tax gatheref and his ups.
But 'alasl literally reckoned without my hosts,
for sooner was l snug in bed than was beset
by Thousands, as it seemed to me, OF broad
backed Britons, each sponging for tribute on
my vital currency. Twas as knobbed and fur
rowed as an ear of corn when woke next morn
ing.
The boy who asked me what time please,
would ave my breakfast was so slow in con-
veying my reply to the inferior regions that
felt Obliged to quicken his movements with a
quarter. When he brought me my boots,
roughly cleaned and doubtfully polished, he
wore so forbidding a scowl that / timidly ten
deFed him another shilling He pocketed it with
gruff acknowledgment and disappeared.
After breakfast set out to see London. In
doing so saw five policemen at % cents each
81. 25; four cabmen at about dollar each, 81;
four boys who shut me in the cab at 20 cents
each, 81, man who told which door to enter
at st. Pauls, 20 cents a man who told
me l couldn't go over the Houses of Par
lament without an order, 25 cents; two men
who said something could not understand, %
cents each, 90 cents; a boy who pointed out the
hao oe oo,alax
looking person in scarlet and gold, 81; three
deputy beadles who gave me some truly startling
historical information about the Abbey at 90 cents
each, 81. 30; a one-eyed man who shook my faith
in the authenticity of the Black Princes relics,
25 cents; a drunken soldier who assured me that
the mounted men at the Horse Guards were
real troopers on live horses, % cents; a young
woman who publicly apostrophized me as her
dear and refused to leave me short of half a
crown, 70 cents; clericallooking person who
told me how to get to the Tower. 90 cents;
a lordly person in the Tower who turned me
over to a Beefeater, 90 cents; four Beefeaters
who RECALLED me with original versions of the
history of England at 35 cents each, 81; pom
pous official heard he was lord-who gave
me permit to look aG the inside of the House of
Commons 81. Total for one days sightseeing,
$l4 25 Grand total for the trip, roughly, 1914
dined villainously for 81 % at a restaurant
full of mirrors and wax flowers in Regent street,
and paid the waiter Is cents to curb his de-
risive Impotence of my cutaway coat and gray
trousers. linen went TO 3 IheaJer. NY seat
the most uncomfortable IN which have ever
tried to sit out play, cost me 1915. For
% cents my cane and hat were taken care of,
and paid IL cents for programme The usher
relieved me of % cents more for showing me
my seat. Drinks between the acts cost me 20
cents each-60 cents-and my supper afterwards
the vilest oysters have ever run across and
the wooliest of mutton-chops-let me in for an
other $1-50-total, $917 Tally for all, so far,
| $685. IL.
Next morning called for the bill of my
| lodgings 1t was $3not much-and cheer
fully gave the servant who brought it up the
so cents she expected. Then | sat down and
calculated. 1t was costing me nearly $25 a day,
principally in tips to see London The pro-
vinces would, perhaps, be worse Paris must be
even more expensive. For half the money
could have twice the fun in my native New York.
So went to Fenchurch street lit cost me So. 70
to get there), fought my passage home on the
next steamer and after spending SIT .68 between
the Strand and West street, New York, com
pleted my Europeon tour. / feel entitled, there
fore, to declare that to pass one day of extreme
discomfort in London cost me just $458 50.