Morning journal and courier., 1884-02-12
SECON DAIRY.

1 duel is the quickest kind of an encoun-
 ter, because it only takes two seconds s.- | Boston Times. 1 Omaha people bristle up when they are l spoken of as 'Omahogs s"-New York Con-
 mercial Advertiser. Hasn't the walking been awful?-Bost on
 Post. The walking has been good enough. | It's the falling that has been aWful.-Phila- | delphia Call. By rubbing a cats back in the dark you
 can see the electricity fly, and when the cat claws your hand you can feel the shock Philadelphia Chronicle-Herald. eff it be true that the hairs of ones head 1 are all numbered" said the man after he had l escaped from his wife's clutches ''there will l be one angel at least who will show up, with
 big deficit. t.''-Phiadelphia Gall. ''Did the deceased, :" asked the coroner, | sententiously, of the rural witness, Did the deceased die under suspicious circumstan
 ces ?" ''Naw, he didn't, he died in the l water, under the ice."-Pittsburg Chronicle. ''Is your wife acquainted with the dead | languages?" asked the professor of Newman | man. Maybe she is, was the reply, "but | the language ahe uses Is entirely too warm to
 have been dead very long. ."-Milwaukee Sen,
 tinel.
 No" said young man who was asked to 1 sing, Il have not attempted to sing for sev- | eral years. My voice got away from me when was very young; and when l caught | it It squeaed so that it fright ened me, and let it go again. ."-Middletown Transcript i A silk farm has been established in Pow | hatan county Va, and a Vassar college | graduate thinks it must be so nice, because 1 the farmers wife and his daughters go | out in the field and pick enough silk to make l a new dress whenever they feel inclined that | way.-Norristown Herald. l Adams fall reached long way. Adam and Eve were first placed in ths Garden gof Eden where it was perpetual summer. When | they sinned they were driven out into the cold world and ever since that the sons of
 Adam have had to pay $7 a ton for coal and $500 apiece for sealskin sacques. ues.-Philadel- phia Call. ''Oh dear,'' said one of our ladies to anoth- CT, II dread summer coming on because my | house is infested with ants, and can't keep
 them out of the sugar box" "Oh," replied 1 the other, "thats easy enough. l saw my l grand mother drive the ants out of her sugar l tub, and the only thing she did was to fill 1t ! with salt instead of sugar." which shows the wisdom of our ancestors over the ignorance
 of their degenerate descendants. Waterloo Observer. A LAD WHO SAW THE SEA. Hal Harrow was a farmers lad And mischievous chap was he, He never longed to see the plough, But longed to plough the sea. And ss away from home he ran, This skipper free; But still he left his home behind A skipper for to bs. He safely got on board boat, When his trouble did begin; The ship christened the Lookout" Although bound to Pekin. 1 He thought the vessel would sail first, As her bow pointed North; But great was his surprise and fear When he the ship sail forth, terrible gale then struck the boat' I The surged OCT her guard l And though hard tack was in her hold, To tack the ship WAS hard. The ship was wrecked and all we:e lost | The sailors and their grog, l Save lucky Hal, who saved himself | By clnging to her "log." pa-sing barque soon picked him up, I And brandy fixed him right; ! He drunk became when he told l The barque was water-tght. When he reached home, voyage he took, But it not 8 sailing; | His daddy eaid he would shed tears | To the wood shed they went ''whaling" | fOrk