Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1884-01-24
many years. The ladies are Darwinians
as Psyche informs the new comers:-

With view TO rise in the social SCALE
He shaved his bristles, and he docked his tail,
he grew moustaches, and he took his tub,
And he paid a guina to a toilet club
But it would not do,
The scheme fell through
For the maid was beauty's Fairest Queen,
With golden tresses,
Like a real princess,
While the ape despite his razor keen,
Was the apiest ape that ever was seen.
He bought white ties and he bought dress suits,
He crammed his feet into bright tight boots
And to start himself on a brand new plan,
He christened himself the Darwinian Man!
But it would not do,
The scheme fell through
For the maiden fair whom the monkey craved,
Was a radiant Being,
With brain far-seeeing,
While a shaved monkee though well-behaved,
At best Is only monkey shaved!
When they are about to suffer punish
ment Hildebran's soldiers appear and bat
ter at the gates or the castle. The curtain
falls on act |.
ACTII
The second act occurs upon the outer
walls and courtyard of Castle Adamant.
Melissa, Sacharissa and ladies discovered,
armed with spears.
Death to the invader!
Strike deadly blow,
Az an old Crusader
Struck his Paynim foe!
Let our martial thunder
Fill his soul with wonder!
Tear his ranks aSunder,
Lay the tyrant low!
The Princess, attended by Blanche and
Psyche, enters and says
like your spirit, girls We have TO meet
Stern, bearded warriors in fight to-day.
Wear naught but what is necessary to
Preserve your dignity before their eyes
And give your limbs full play.
The Princess calls upon them to prepare
for action. Sacharissa declares that while
she as surgeon, is willing to cut off legs
and arms in theory, she will not venture
to do it in practice. She calls upon her
fusilleers to advance, but they are armed
with mere gilded toys, having left their
rifles in the armory "for fear that in the
heat and turmoil of the fight they might
90 off, The band doesn't feel well and
can't come out to-day" However, the
Princess declares that she will cut off legs
and discharge rifles herself.
Cana, little later, has the following
song
Whene're i spoke
Sarcastic joke
Replete with malice spiteful,
This people mild
Politely smiled
And voted me delightful!
New whe.I wight
Sits up all night
Ill-natured jokes devislng,
And all his wiles
Are met with smiles,
It's hard, there's no Disgusting.
Oh, don't the days seem lank and long
When all goes right and nothing goes wrong,
And isn't your life extremely fiat
With nothing whatever to grumble at!
Hilarion, Florian and Cyril are brought
out handcuffed and still wearing the robes.
When they approach the battlements to
attack the ladies Arac sings
Whene'ere we go
To fight the foe
We never throw a chance away,
And at last
We always cast
Each useless circumstance away.
A helmet light
Is far from light,
Life guardsmen know how true 1t Is.
(Taking off helmet.)
A bright cuirass
We also class
With useless superfuities.
Taking of cuirdss.
All this array
Is in the way
1t is, upon my word 1t is
For who can fight
Locked up tight
In lobster-li absurdities?
BIZ this time they hare remOred all their
armor and rear nothing but a close fitting
shape sua.
Though brasses
And tasScs
And snowy cuirasses,
Are all very useful to dazzle the lasses.
He classes with asses
Who cumbers with masses
OF metal
His fettle,
Tro la la la la!
The three are defeated by the ladies, and
after musical and recitative explanations
the Princess utters the final lines Of the
opera
We will not trouble you, Hilarion,
have been wrong-I see my error now.
Take me- Hilarion I'VE will walk the world
Yolked in all exercise of noble end
And through those dark gates across the
wild
That no man knows! Indeed l love thee.
Comet