News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-04-10
lhE LlME-KILN CLUB.
So"h ADVICE FROM BROTHER GaRp.
NER.
re" Rules for Living Laid Do,x a.
wee that White Men as Wen as CoIore.,
Hay Follow.
From the Detroit Free Press.1

| IIlOul tue OetTOlI free Press
From the proceedings of the Lime
Kiln Club we copy the following advice
given to the members: De man who
has truth on his side am armed wild a
shotgun dat scatters oil over ten-acre
lot an shoots to kill. While de liar NAV
git along tolerably we'll fur few vars,
an even reach de pint of holdin' an Of
fis an ridin' in the same street car wild
de postmaster, de mills of de gods am
slowly grindin' away, an all of a sudden
he gifts drap an am swept off de
checker-bo'd. When you can't believe
what man says you have no furder use
fur him.
Bewar' of ambishun. Siezer was ana
bishus, AM whar' am he now? Nero
was ambishus, an de grave in which he
sleeps cannot eben be found. Roscoe
Conkling was ambishus, an at one fell
swoop he was knocked into de center of
las week. Ben Butler was ambishus,
an to-day he would be forgotten except
fur de picters of his face on tobacco
packages De mint ambishun seizes
any one of you heah befo' me an makes
you sigh fur to upset laws, invent new
customs an spill your oratory from de
Speakers desk in Congress, you am
goner. A tree can't } all top. Oar
has got to be some roots an lower
limbs. While dc top may show off a
leetle mo-, it am alus de ''fust to be
damaged in gale
One of de evils of de present ginera-
shum am its proneness to squander an
waste. 1t am only when we cum down
to de las nickel dat we begin to query
whether we haven't been too extrav-
agant. I desiah to say to my fellow
citizens dat what man Arms doan'
count. 1t am what he saves. I see
seberal watches among you. see dat
some of you have on damon pins. 1
has been in some O. yoor houses an
found china shugar bowls an silver
plated knives an napkins wild a red
border to 'em. Do you need sich things?
Am you mo- happy dan when de shugar
was placed in a sasser an passed around
an you cut your meat wild iack-knife?
Bewar' of what dey call stile. Stile
fo'ces you to put $50 carpet on de
parlor foo an go widout wood fur d
kitchen stove. Stile fo'ces your wife to
put on a silk dress an go widout 'nuff to
eat. Stile demands dat you put $40
lambrequin at one winder an stuff an
ole hat into de next Stile fo'ces you to
give a birthday party fur yur darter,
while your son has to go barfutted to
make up fur it. Take off dem damon
pins an sell 'em fur two dollahs apiece
an put de money in de bank fur rainy
day. Go trade dem watches fur saw
bucks an buck-saws. Peel dem sto'
cloze, an poan' fear to let de world see
you in duds mo- appropriate to de wages
you, airn.
Industry am de key to success, while
idleness am de straight road to de poo
house. De difference between lazy man
an loafer am so small dat nobody stops
to argy over it. De man who sots down
on a dry-goods box to wait fur better
times will nebber have a gravestun
reared above de place whar' he am buried.
Laziness waits fur de frost to get out of
de ground. Industry digs down frew it.
Laziuess hopes it won't rain. Industry
goes to work an puts new shingles ON
| de roof. Laziness drinks from a mud
| puddle. Industry turns de windlass an
| brings up pure water from de deep
we'll"
Gas race we am too restless an
oneasy. When we am doin' we'll we
sigh to do better. If we have 'tater AMI
ham fur breakfast we argy that we orter
have chicken pot-pie fur dinner an fried
oysters fur supper. If we happen to
find ourselves possessed of mo- money
dan am wanted fur rent, purvishuns an
fuel for de week, we can't rest Till we
price fo'ty dollar suit of cloze, or a
boss dad kin trot in 2:40. We mus
settle down as if we had cum to stay,
an mean to lib always. When we git a
job at dollar a day we mustn't let go
of it to hunt fur one at ten shiIlings.
One reason why it takes SO long to catch
rabbit is bekase we have to hunt all
over fur him, an bekase he keeps hop
pin about. Chose your brush-heap an
let it be known dat you kin alters be
found under it.