New-York tribune., 1884-10-14
TIE TlLK or TIE DIY.

Not long AGO u Scottish clergyman reprOyed member
of hl. nnok for being drunk. Gin It please ye said
Iriuuly, d" dinnn drink as mrkle ns yerscl.' "Nhy,
how h. that" said the minister "Aweel diuua ye aye
taxa .lass whuskey and waior after dinner r why.
yes JENNY. take glass 0f whi'hey after dinner
to aid digestion" And dnna Sc talk glass . toldy
every uict when We gangng t. bed = Yes, to lie
-urc inst take a. little toldy eNery night to help me to
sleep" Well" continued Jcuny THAT'S Just fourteen
gli.aes a week. anl about sixty every month. ohy
&C., pnbI once "a month"; aud then If ld TAX sixty gnases
n ~ nj max me dead drunk for week Now Sc SOC the
only difference Ia tlnt ye time II better than do
II T. tclo,rapncd from Washington that some ~ the
bcda Of acpaitmcut- completely conirolied thril
wiyrs Alas nnl oas this d spotic siutr OF AFFAIRS "a not
confined to washington aud the Government Louis
vile Couiior-J0uihal
There are now more than 100000 persons In England
WIN -o the hc,cle and tcy cle aud the capital Invested
in tho manufacture of these machines Is tloOOOOOO,
employing nearly 10000 mon
Adariur Young dude IN Hombcigh
L.sayed on tho cor ct to plelgh
lie iuu,ir such "a din
mat the noighbors dropped in.
Aud the dude cium tue golden Htarweigh =,
--lSt Paul Herald
The isbury Park journal says that many physicians In
that place put up prescriptions which il written,
pttca frimontl q. H." "frely translated" II HhyHi
prc,rfiton of tbiH hind moana Uto thH man all he
whl,kc, ho wants, and behind tbH legal harrlehe' We
nrn nsnuod 10 say of our drug 'IofcH VIII proceed
to deal ont Just what h wanted nna thr io'u'h Tue pro-
scripton for further un"
There IA a story about Phillips Brooks tending % show
thn oven one his mental calbrc once fe ' dlSoohr
az cns which often haunt young men whsh starting
divinity aud asked nm what he thoushl Ok hls Trying To
preach i0n might n.y. wa, tio not very encouraging
ieply. lie did Try Every Othei saturday.
Not long ago lady who had Just returned from Europe
wos asked by "A friend II had the lion OF ST.
Mark son YES" she replied. arrived just IN time
TO see the noble creature ei The late Dr. Beadle of
Philadelphia, must have encountered the same lady He
smoke Of the beauty OF the Dardanecs and she replied:
OH yes know them well. They are intimate friends
Of mine"
II Is all the fashion now TO have musical subjects
painted the panels OF pianoiote WaIner concert
l. depicted by singing pot OF paint broadsde at the in-
strnent and getting the hired girl to wipe II on -Buri
mgton Free lTess.
Bob " Burdette:
Hark aud oh hear, the pianoi Is banging
Sonnet and cantlcle, chant ana glee),
The fellow upstairs his guitar Is atwdhsihs'
The children are singing jubilee.
Jusr over the way there's banjo. | think,
With ITS Pnk-a-punk -pank, punk pink pank PINK;
And down at the corner the man with the huc
Is rendng the night with toote-too-toot -,
And oon pah-pah. ooin pah -pal bra-i Dra-a Doom!
Tne brass band is practising up in Its room'
Ex-President Mark Hopkins OF Williams College ia
mclV Ills four boy all going To vote with their sire
lor Blaine Il Waterbury American.
As,uthern Episcopal bishop dining IN Boston re-
GENTLY when a young clergyman wishing 10 say some
,bin asked him how his vile enjoyed the heat
down there" but politely withdrew the question when
the bishop bandy informed him that she had been dead
two years.
1avbair the King OF the Maors. on leaving England
vrnte farewell letter % the gentry aud their ladies'
telling them tney were very nice set Ol people ana
th. In slaud WAS - great country. lie advised them 10
stay there" aud evidently doesn't care TO have Them
tr.mpng over his NowLealand possessions tsDringued
Union.
The Rev. Dr. Sankcy. OF Rochester, n. Y, who has
ust returned from Presby eran Council at Belfast Is
r.ported as having said few days ago: e.ieve the
PRESBYTERIAN churches OF England Scotland and Ireland
are tering toward ritualsm very rapidly This is es-
pecaly 50 IN scottish churches surprising as II may
seem"
type setting machine has been invented py resi-
dent llDn, V, which il represented rs i'o Pvi
feet Unlrss, however. Il manage 10 correct 'ne
writer's by substituting here ahn inoio VIZ
which he not use nad thought oi usihE ana WV m
under any circumstances Tor ,ue Mou mh'. , %
took especial pains write plainly sho m''ni'o mus
uroye "A lanenuble failure. IL can never nolo W ooh
plre with the Intelligent oonl"sitor' -ibos"n Ai""
| scrpt.
The Ner- York Times mentions with great Pee Una,
Nichiu person gHit.r or less distinction whO mas
ceu Na,or of Detroit and Is now an iudulcncSnt tsc-
nnncan rnl, Mr. blame the mOst colossal liar oI the
Hlin, AZ a liar Not all II simply proves that this
p.r.on IL beside himself vita Iassinn M rcasoha pc
man nlk- either ln pnblio or ia private hc
cooyince- that Mr. Baile IL colossal isE put 40
demonstrates every that lac himself ID hiohu
| mental --lEochesser Post EA.Tess