The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1884-01-13
GOSSIP
About Women; their WiIes
and Weaknesses,
Some Harmless Attempts
at Humor,
And a Collection of House
hold Hints.


sweet tart, good pie"
Miss Mary Anderson was very
liberal in her Christmas presents.
DR.. Mary Walker wears a plug
hat when she wants TO put on style.
The play of Uncle Toms Cabin is
all on account of Eliza. Stowe this
away.
How shall we reach the boys?-
Mrs. Livermore. Take a little
longer single.
The oculists all agree tb at the use
of dotted wells by ladies has in
creased their business.
Miss Susan B. Anthony might
have been dear, good grand.
mother, but fate willed it other
wise.
Mary and Mildred, the two
daughters of General Robert d.
Lee, will pass part of the winter In
Washington.
London critics call Lolita "the
dramatic cocktail OF America" She
is doubtless too lively for the Brit
ish beef>eaters.
The Albion (Mich) ladies' brass
band is a nourishing institution.
The bass drummeress is a widow
with nine children.
Mrs. Elizabeth Cady Stanton, who
is ine-looking lady, objects to the
horrid wood cuts published over
her name in many papers.
Mrs. Emma Hopkins, of Spring
Lake, Mich, thinks she has Ethan
Aliens sword and wants the Yer
mont legislature to pay her 1000
for it.
When certain bachelor was mar
ried the members of the Bachelor
Club broke him up by sending him,
as a wedding present, a copy OF
Paradise Lost.
Theodore More had married eight
different women. So whenever he
joined party Of villagers in frolic
they welcomed him with, "The
| More, the marrier."
Madame is busily engaged with
her dressmaker. In comes the maid
servant. "Madame, it is the doctor"
"The doctor! l cannot receive him,
Tell him that 1 am ILL.,"
"Ahl" remarked Fogg, as he gazed
bashfully from the front orchestra
row at the ballet girls. "nOw | un-
derstand the full significance of the
passage: srhe body is more than
raiment.
Are you going to the Lyceum
with Carrie and Belle Tonight %
asked one Grove avenue maiden OF
another last Thursday. "Mot Ly>
ceum and find out whether they are
going," was the horiid reply.
Letter from his well beloved to a
young gummy: FINALLY, my ownsst
own. understand that / love you
mere for your detects than your
moral qualities. and thus Judge OF
the boundlessness of my love fol
you"
Mrs. Senator Jones in her fragile
beauty is said to have been the pref
test, and Mrs. Logan, Mrs. Blaine
and Mrs. Brewster the handsomest
OF the ladies who assisted the Pres
ident in receiving callers on New
Years Day.
A Texas woman chased her hus
band a mile and a-half with a clut
for winking at the hired girl, and
he only escaped by climbing a tele>
graph pole. At latest advices she
was Sitting at the foot of the pole
waiting for the crowd to leave SC
she could go up and see him.
She laid her cheek on the easy
chairback against his head and
murmured: "Eow L do love to rest
thus against your dear head, Angus.
tUsl sDo you?" said he; sis it
because you love me, darling ?" mo;
because it is so nice and softl" Then
he lay and lay, and thought and
thought.
This year is leap year, young man,
and if there is any particular young
lady you have any fear of, you had
better make haste and prOpitiate
her with a handsome present. Per-
haps in this way you may induce
her to hold off four years longer. 1t
is worth trying anyway.
A woman's brain is Of finer quail
ity than that of man. Fineness OF
brain gives quickness of perception
and we see that fact illustrated in
this: A woman can tell what an
other woman has got on,at glance
whereas a man might study the
matter q year and be NJ wiser.
A party of Chicago young lad es
and gentlemen were sailing on the
lake. A heavy squall came on and
capsized the boat, but before she
careened one of the young men
with great presence Of mind, cried
out: "Throw your shoes overheard
girls-quick." The suggestion was
only partly obeyed. All those who
laid hold of shoe crawled into ii
and were saved. The rest were lost
An English girl wants to know
how long girls should be courted.
Our opinion may not be worth
much in such matters, but we think
long girl should be courted in the
same manner as short girls are
courted = with operas, carriage
rides, CONNECTIONS, setting up nights,
/ and so forth IF a Young man can't