The Osceola times., 1884-02-23
Maude Muller.

criminal negligence on the part of gov
ernment and write one myself. Not being
even So much as third cousin to poet |
hope the reader will excuse breaks
Maude Muller ON summer day
Sat in the parlor making hay.
Beside her robcd in glory stood
a very pink of perfection dude
An utterly utter tie he wore
An eyeglass on his cheek he bore
Spoken. He was another bore Cf the
largest caibre himself, but Maude did
non know it. Maude had no time to
think of anything outside of her own
hardships, and to back bite her father for
not giving her more money. And no
wonder, for
Hor Sunday bangs were half worn out
And curled as limp as Il gobler's snout.
And out of Il closet fun of shoes
There wasn't pair that she could use.
tChiefy because they were No, 2's.l
And I'm all her life of II years,
Sne thought, Whue freshct OF woman : tears
Burst forth and fell from her soft blue eyes
Like summer showers from cloudlcss skies,
And a mighty sob her corset string broke
81 have never had II sealslin cloak"
Spoken. No ordinary corset string of
spun cotton, either; but a ten-mule
power, double-back action leather thong,
cut from the old mans saddle skirts
years before, when in her dawning teens
she first began to realize the importance
of pinching her body in two at the mid
die. By the way that was the reason she
could not think. The connection between
her stomach and brain was cut OF. She
had dyspepsia Of the head no blood to
digest her ideas and no ideas to digest :;
a very common disease now days. And
thus it was that life was 50 beset with
trials that she resolved IN end them all
in marriage. So she consumed valuable
time THAT she might have used to adyan-
tagc in chewing the hard end Of an old
tile) trying To rope in this caricaturc of
donkey for husband
He was far from the cheapest of his clan:
He was no three for a quarter man.
with a j-cent cane and Il rubber collar.
He ranged as high as "hcluyadullar"
He was the dude that ruled the roost
Aud gave to dudedom It's biggest boost
when first from out the comic past
This genus homo took its cast.
some twenty years ago or more
when the whole tribe scarce reached u score.
He was soft as mush, yet hard rs steel;
soft In the head and hard in the heel.
when 1t ruincd he knew enough 10 go in,
As his marriage proved. His "oId maus tin
He had squandcrcd fast, tin the old man said
II wish that the cIot were dead or we'd"
Spoken. Therefore it happened that
W hen Maudc babe him good-bve that
hight the wedding-day was fixed, and
she told her father and asked him fer n
check.
The next day she asked him for another
check.
The next day she asked him tor another
check.
The next day she asked him for another
check.
The next day she asked him for another
check.
Tho mex, day she asked him for another
check.
The next day She asked him Tor another
check.
The next day-but why resale the
printers with "phat takes,' when they
are already making SO much money their
purses are threatened with apopleXy, and
they themselves are becoming bl0atcd
bondholders. II is enough to say that
when the hinges Of the check machine
wore ont and would not work she began
to run him in del t. She was very happy
about this time, up 10 her eyes in vclyct-
and hrocadcs and laccs She tripped
about
And trui.cd an operate air.
And smiled To hear the old man SWcnr
she had the world by the tail at hast
And made up her mind 10 hold il fast,
Till tail hold tor carhold was changed l,y the
priest
And all was secure for this life at least
For this NE forsooth II was hardly day
Before She knew the dci was topaz.
1t was work or starvc. As the weeks passed nv
She silently dried the tear in her eye.
\ drcary legend above her door
4 dilapidatrd -hinQlr bore
Twas this: plain sewing wanted here
So Maude worked on from year to year.
She made the living and sawed the wood
But like death to II niggcr she stuck to that
dude.
Children came with fiaNen curls
And he sworc because they were mo count
girls"
Lofty the scorn he brutally hurled
ON the wife who only brought girls to the
world;
rntil the dread of the motherhood pain
The dread of his anger was added amain.
There came day when her poor old dad
Together with all the baggage he had,
A ghostly valiso with his battered soul
Away from his earthly hauuts forth stole.
Twas the saddcst day of the saddest year
In all Maudc's years and DAYS SO drcar-.
Since her father first had strokcd her curls
And called her the dearest Of little girls.
She thought of this rs she looked at his clay.
And many thought she had that day.
al