Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-12-16
The Bad Boy.


"Well, well, don't look so con-
demGed solemn, said the groceryman
to the bad boy, as he came in and
leaned against the show case, put his
hands in his pockets, and looked
down at the floor with his eyes "sot."
whats the matter of you? "What
you thinking Of
81 was just thinking and wonder
ing if it was right for parents to en-
courage boys by telling them Of the
glorious future that is before any
American boy, the prospect that he
may one day be president of the
United States. think it would be
better to encourage boys by pointing
out TO them how, by conducting
themselves right, they can escape the
fate of running for president. What
glory is there in being president? II
president amounts to anything he
gets shot, and If Il decent man runs
for president, he is abused worse
than pickpocket. Washington was
all right enough, because his oppo-
nants never found out any of his
cussedness, and If they did they das-
sent tell of it, for fear he would take
shot gun and blow 'em full of buck
shot. But the presidents, since l can
remember, have been pretty tutf, or
got murdered. No, sir, when pa tells
inc to brace up and be a man, and
some day may be president, say
Pa amt a going 10 he that kind Of
a man. Politics are demoralizing
the boys worse than anything.
Some of us boys don't know whether
we are Democrats or Republicans,
because both parties have hired us to
carry torches. Say what is the best
thing to cure a prohibitionist's head
ache 7"
"Cure a prohibitionist's headache p
asked the groceryman IN astonish-
ment, "what does a prohibitionist
want with a headache? Who has
got one?"
ooh, pa. suppose he had the
worst headache in this country, and
all from prohibition. pa has belonged
to both parties during the campaign,
and up to the election he was pretty
sober, for him, but all last week,
when Blaine was elected one day and
Cleveland was elected the next day,
it was 100 much for pa, as lie had to
change parties about twice day,
and he got so full that he suffered.
lie shouted until he got hoarse, and
came home one night with rooster
tied by one leg, and he tied it to
the bed post. Pa was feeling funny,
and when ma asked him what he
brought home he told her it was q
rooster he had been carrying arond
all the evening, and she would find
II in the morning tied to the bed post
| thought il was time pa was broke
of politics, so took big rat which
we caught in trap, and united the
rooster, and tied the string to the rat,
and left it there. When pa woke NJ
in the morning he woke ma up and
said now he would show her the
rooster he carried around all night
and he took hold of the string and
pulled, and said: Come up here
chicky,' and he pulled the rat RICH
up on the bed. Well, you'd dide Il
see pa look at that rat, and | know
you'd dide to see ma get scarce
She made one Jump and landed OF
the bureau, and yelled nine kinds o
murder. Pa looked at the rat sort o
dubious, and rolled over, and lookeC
the other way, and then he wanted I,
satisfy himself that twas not roos
ter, so he pulled itup again, and tn
rat ran under the bedclothes, and the
pa had had rest enough and he jump
ed out of the bed too quick.
Then you ought to have heard tn
temperance lecture ma gave pa. Sh
told him if he had got SO far gone tina
he would carry house rat around i
a procession half the night, think
ing it was rooster, he was in a goo
condition TO go to the lunatic aylun
and unless he swore off drinkin
. from that minute she would make an
plication to have him shut up by tn
authorities. Well, when ma gets ex
D cited she makes pa pay attention, an
so pa took solemn oath that h
would join the prohibition party
and he did, and he has not drank
drop for three days, and he is offu
nervous, and his head aches so eyer
hair stands right up straight.
have been putting pounded ice o
his head two nights, and he has &c
so l think l can tell him with safet,
how the rat got there"
swell, I AM glad your pa is goln
t to be man again." said the grocery
man "but you boys shouldn't hav
anything to do with politics. Yo
are too young, and it might ruiz
: your regulations"
eyes, but we are taught that tn
highest ambition of man is to b
president, and that we may on
E day occupy that exalted Office tina
Washington once held, but we can
get there without being politician
can we? Haven't we got to lear