The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-01-08
Spoopendyke Goes Hunting.

gently. can't you pack val!se for
me. Specklewo:tie and | are goin.
duck huntirg, now that the other
fellows sre ali home.
Oh. nv! squealed Mrs. Spoopen.
dye, dropping her crazy quilt 10 all
directions. Promise NE you won't
take gun.
What's the matter with the woman ?
inquired Mr.. Spoop -ndyk", losing his
cherfuiness and cycling his wife criti-
caIly A gun! what dye s'pose we'd
do with guns. No, We AXE salt, Mrs.
Spoopendyke; salt. | say and we
climb trees ard lay it Oh their tails
We're after tn breed of ducks that
rnOst in tree tops Ike dod gasted owl.
Understand?
Oh! murmured his wife, re urnine
her efforts of working forg+t-me-aots
with green silk. That ia much nicer
and then thew won't he full of little
bullets like those you bought las
week. But be c..r,tul If Il SHOWS and
come home The paper says
bod CAST what the paper SAYS,
snorted Mr.. SpoOi endyke. With
your knowledge Of the weather and she
science Of gunnery you only need a
little less intellect and little more
pocket mo 'ey to he = whole irnal >e--
vice But-see here, did your paper
say anything about a gifted female
getting her husbands vali;e packed
by the next presidential election?
Certainly, dear. resp. 'nded Mrs.
Spoopenhyke, Juggling at the huge Tag
her husband brought in, and finally
placing it on the table. Now what
will you take?
Take! roarei Mr.. SpOOpendyke-
take, he repeated,as The enormity fhs
wifes ohstinacy aud ignorance began
to dawn upon hun; jusl pus me up
swallow tail coat and a revised edition,
chuck IN linen dasIer and afprav,r
book remember prayer hook, and
not messiy old hymn bo"k. Thee
ducks we're after are all of the Eng
lHh church and won't stand any fool
lug on the art cles of faith.
TRAITS rignt, he YELLED, as his ODE
dien. wife jammed dpwn the dress
coat that's tie kind Of wife ID MT
suppose those ducks'iI be any more
impressed by my appearance in
hunting coat. Don; ina CINE Tor an
instant that those birds will know the
difference between SpOoPendyke with
frozen ears and a straw hat and ali
those traps I've wasted wealth on to
protect my health.
And you'll need your new slippers,
continued Mrs SPoopendyks, meiita-
lively, her finger on her lips, and our
new tie with polka dots
You've hit it now! yelled Mr..
Spoopendyke, sSAHg'ng up like
vail You've gcs it. | arm going tn
q social entertainment These. ducks
are going to give New England din
ner, aud Henry Ward Be-cher and |
are going 10 make speeches on the adj
yancemenJ of duck ami the evoluIi IN
IF fowl. Say, Mrs. Sppop-ndyke,
continued her nu, nani, dropping into
frroci rus elm do yru thi K those
ducks are giving eerrbap out in the
swamps or induiging IN Italian opara
in the marshes of Long Island Well,
they're not and they're not giving a
m"asiy church sociabIe either. Conse-
quently, Mrs. Sppopecdyke, iii be
freed 20 ask YOU 10 pack that recep-
ttclA as | shall dictate, and NJ, SPOON
emdvke flung himself i'll chair ami
glared, while his wife proceeded 10
pack under his instruction.
Where are you going to put taat ?
he demanded, SIS nis wife carefully
folded bis shooting coat.
Why here in the bottom, because
No you don't, interrupted Mr..
Spoopendyke / want that on top
where it will be handy-and what are
you doing With that? he CALCULATED.
as Mrs. SpOopendyke picked up a brx
of cigars.
Why, dear, I'll put these at the
bottom and the lighter articles
Not if Spoopendvke is ia full pos
session of his faculties. / want t,sat
and my bottle of brandy on top In case
of accident. Think Pm going 10 fish
forty days and forty nights as DID the
prophets of old, tor those necss>i les of
lite 1? Think I'm going to perch all
night In tree like dol gasred wood-
chuck just because you won't put my
clothes where | can find them
But, my dear. pleaded Mrs. Spo0p-
endyke, they can't all 60 On top