davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1884-08-07

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River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1884-08-07
THF REPUBLICAN CANVASS.

Secretary Mcpherson, of the Republican
committee, rs i'll daily receipt of many letters
form all parts OF the country, which are full Of
the most abundant promise, He says that he
had been familiar with and an active partici-
pant in all the campaigns for the past twenty
five years, and he had never known a more ia
vorable outlook at this early stage Referring
10 the great meeting of Irish Republicans in
New York, he said:
1t has indeed peculiar significance from the
fact that thousands of enthusiastic men who
attended that meeting have hitherto been demo-
Gratis and never before shouted for Republican
candidates and principles. They belong to a
large class of voters who havo been considered
as the especial property OF the Democratic
party, who would vote the straight ticket no
matter what it was, under any and all cirenm-
stances. When they revolt and refuse to be
longer led around by the nose, it means some
thing. | have believed for years that a break
of this kind would come sooner or later. II Is
not confined to any one section, but is general
all over the country. Such newspapers as the
Irish World and Irish Nation, in New York,
and the Citizen in Chicago, exert widespread
influence among the people of that nationality
and descent Large Irish Blaine and Logan
clubs are being organized everywhere, and
there are indications OF regular stampede
The following circular has been issued from
the headquarters of the Republican national
committee:
Dear Sir: The pending presidential cam
paign is of unusual Importance to the country.
Every Republican is deeply interested in its re-
suit The national committee, on behalf OF the
Republican party, desires to make 1t justly
vigorous and effective, and success is certain
in November Funds are required, however to
meet the lawful and proper expenses of the
compaign, and to provide the same the COM
mittee finds itself dependent upon the liberal
ity of Republicans who will make such volun
tary contributions as their means will permit
and as they feel inclined TO give You
are therefore respectfully invited TO
send as soon as you conveniently may, by
draft on New York, or postal money order, to
the order Of B. +. Jones' chairman Of the Re
publican national committee, 242 Fifth avenue,
New York city, such sum as you may delsre TO
contribute for the objects before mentioned
Receipt for the same will be sent by return
mail The committee checrfully calls the atten-
ton of every person holding any office, place,
or employment under the United States, or
any Of the departments of the government to
the provisions of che act of congress entitled
Gan act to regulate and improve the civil ser
vice of the United States" approved Jan. 10,
1888, and states that its influence Will be ex-
erted in conformity Herewith.
, 1884-11-25
an wye N eAaIs.
An American. .Emprss.ion OF thu
Gay City as seen at.Nfght.

Denver Opinion.l
Thero may be more beautiful sights, per-
haps, than the quiet beauty OF the French
capital sleeping In this moonlight on the
Seine, but do not remember at this moment
what they are. Looking down from tho
mighty Qualifications 10 where nearly 2,000,-
900 warm-hearted, h~ot-headed, loyal and
yet rebellious, peaceful and still belligerent
people nre siumbering, what mem
ories Of blood and riot and ruin
come trooping up in the brain OF the be-
holder. Again, the air seems filled with the
wild roar and rush Of the riotous c~anaille,
the beautiful boulevards run red with
French blood, and the glorious architecture
OF forgotten centuries crumbles and yields TO
the mad tide OF revolution and revenge.
From the early days Of tho infant Paris,
known then as Lutetia Parisorum, when the
French capital was simply an outftting
point, down TO the days when she dictated
to the world in the matter OF national debts
and o~venskirts, we trace the wonderful
career Of the great city. Again we SEQ
Cesar rebuilding the city. In fancy We see
him being abou with his coat of and his
red suspenders flashing in the warm south
ern sun His noble head Is thrown
back proudly, and across the horizon OF his
pantaloons there Is a dash OF pale light that
shows whore he sat down in the mortar-bed
near where the Pavilion de Saltpetre now
stands. Rapidly the eye sweeps down the
Seine from the Louvre, along tho Tuileries,
the Rue Rivoli and the Rue Folderol to
whore the g~listening mass Of the Vendome de
Charlotte Russo raises Its pale facades. In
the foreground stands the Hotel des Invalides,
an imposing pile, crowned with a gilded
dome 100 metres high. Immediately under
II stands the sarcophagus Of Napoleon l.
This s~arcophagus was first used by Napoleon.
He was proud and exclusive about his sar-
cophagi, refusing 10 use a second hand sar-
cophagus, no matter how cheaply he could
procure It,
Moving toward the background. we como
suddenly upon the bourse, the imposing cour
d'etat, the Palais DIES Bsaux Arts, tho Bon
Bon and the Champs do Dofunny. Farther
on rests the Grand Boulevard de Parleyvoo,
silent and abandoned, while down the river
farther, and still beyond the Palais de Liv-
cry Stable, stands the historic Rue de Crazy
WomAn's Creek.
How fresh In memory stfl rests the pict-
urs'of Paree, and what a pleasure 1t Is again
and again to bring back Its tender outlines.
Imperfect though this pen picture may be, l
know IL will be read with much pleasure by
those who SEQ 1t, and IL there should, at first
blush, appear to co a vagueness, and, as it
were, an incompleteness In the description, 1
hope the gentle reader will bear in mind that
Tie Siding, Wyoming, Is about the nearest l
ever got to Paree, and with "A broken leg and
the long, damp walk that stretches out be-
tween myself and France, l am afraid that /
may be delayed in reaching there this fall.
My next letter will be from Rome.
For "A cripple 1 intend to soc as much Of
Europe this fall as possible. BILL NYE-
, 1884-11-25
The Old ssockman's ''shaks."

Ioan FRANCISCO fOatl
Some years 6 an emigrant from the
United States kept a small restaurant In O
town situated in one Of the great stock-rais.
ing districts OF South Australia. He was
presumably the only Yankee in those parts.
There was an enormously rich old stockman
who came into town from his lordly cattle
range at intervals, whose nationality was q
matter OF doubt, though he usually passed
for a taciturn and uncommunicative bachelor
Scotchman.
One day this wealthy but solitary old chap
entered the restaurant of the man from the
states. When he left he looked hard at tho
proprietor, and then simply remarked:
american, aren't your
On being answered in the affirmative tbs
millionaire ~cowpuncher walked away with.
out another word.
Regularly once a week he reappesrod, Sd.
lently ate a hasty lunch, and made the SAM
stereotyped inquiry, receiving the same en-
phatic, ayes, Stree" in reply. At last there
came a time when the eccentric old customer
did not return. One month went by-two.
At last a wagon stopped at the door, and the
old fellow, pale and wasted with sickness,
was helped out and supported into the saloon.
He called for his usual steak with a veal
but dogged determination, ate a morsel and
then tottered up to the counter. As he paid
his bill he whispered, hoarsely:
american, aren't you'll"
@You bet" replied the proprietor. pleas'
antly.
Stretching out his hand the d customer
said:
"Shaksi SO am II"
Then he tottered away without another
word Three days afterward a lawyer came
into our young c~ountryman's place and told
him that the queer old guy o n the Thompson
range had died and left him a cool 81, 200, 900.
, 1884-11-25

one Of the most complete and satisfactory
ever given to the American public. In il
are given the population Of every State,
Territory. county, county seat and every
place in which a newspaper is published;
the character Of the soil; the principal
products with their values; the colored
population in the Southern and South
western States; the Chinese population in
the Pacific States; the political complex
ion ofthe counties, with the majorities,
besides an immense amount Of other valu-
able and Trustworthy information. The
book credits Cheyenne with a population
Of 6 $500. In regard to the circulation of
the papers published herei says: DEM
ocRATlo LEADER daily circulation 200;
DEMOCRATIC LEADER weekly LAO;
Sun daily circulation $50; Sun weekly
646. This demonstrates that the gentle
men who compiled the Newspaper An
nual had a very shrewd and reliable no
ton Of the comparative circulation Of the
daily and weekly LEADER and the daily
and weekly Sun. The information re-
garding the booming circulation of THE
LEADER is not confined to this Territory,
but is recognized and appreciated in the
Eoct
, 1884-11-25

rHRICE

Cheyenne is honored to-day by the adj
rent into her midst Of about one hundred
ladies' and gentlemen who have heretofore
lived principally by the ~precocity Of their
wits and in other ways that are entirely
peculiar. They come here from Denver,
uninhuenced by the aesthetic loveliness Of
our own beautiful city, but principally be-
cause Of the malignant narrow-mindedness
cfthe Queen City police, who have seen
lit to close up their respective places Of
business right at the outset Of what may
prove TO be a very severe spell Of weather.
The visitors have all followed elevated
professional pursuits in Denver, including
gambling and a good deal Of incidental
and e~xtraneous deviltry. The party in
cludes some gentlemanly and accomplished
confidence operators and several bright
and promising bunko men who will no
dodbt extract the hayseed from the
headgear Of the visiting grangers. Chey-
n r was never before in a position TO as
sumo such metropolitan airs. OF course
ii may be necessary for the worthy citizen
to remain more closely within doors after
nightfsll, and he may even find it conven-
lent to invest in an extra burglar alarm or
two; but it should be remembered that
these people must live, and if they can't
live by hook, they must exist by crook.
This fact should reconcile the public
spirited citizen TO the trifing %inconycn-
fence he may be subjected to in being
sand-bagged in an obscure street while his
pocket-book is relieved of its financial
lining.
The party which has already arrived is
merely the advance guard Of those who
are to follow. and when the entire body
shall have arrived there will be a notice.
able and gratifying increase in our popu-
lation.
Perhaps the town will be painted
crimson pretty often now and the APP
p%alling apathy Of the post-election period
dispelled by the joyous sounds of mid
night revelry.
The Denver police have been very un-
kind to these cultured people and that
100 at the opening Of the Winter season.
We feel assured hat our police will deal
more generously with them and that their
residence here will be one uninterrupted
round Of festivities.
, 1884-11-25

rManhattanis" New York letter.
There some shrewd old politician who viii
make a profitable campaign, Judging by
what l know OF one Of his days work, no
matter who gets to the White House. He
walked considerably more than the requisite
distance In coming from the door to my
desk, as though veered by the zephyrs of
past alcoholism from a direct course, and II
was the mere chance OF the wafture which
brought him to me rather than to any other
point in the room. His clothes possessed all
the polish which his manners had lost, and
he'wore them with IN air Of badly damaged
dignity.
"Can / a v Il word with you,D he said.
"No," I replied
you wouldn't bounee me If you knew
me- -"
Why, who are your
"Im a campaign he,p was the composed
reply, as he instinctively thrust one hand
into the breast OF his coat and rested the
other for stsadiness on my desk- @Yes, sir; 1
started out stalwart enough last spring, but
Two been exposed 20 much and nailed so
often kat I'm tattered and torn, battered
and worn. I'm twin brother to Bryant's
Error, that wounded writhes In pain and
dies amid her worshiper1.' But they won't
let me have n demise They keep me going,
dilapidated as j am and tonight I'm famish-
ing for food and drink-especially femish
ing for drink. VIII you give mo a quarterf1
The novelty and humor Of the appeal con-
quered me, for his drollsry was very funny.
He got a dollar before quitting the building,
and l subsequently learned that he did about
as well that same day in every newspaper
office In Park row. The last / heard he was
going through the Wall street region with
equal success This old hummer with the
happy idea was q low comedian in our minor
theatres until incapacitated for stage per-
formnncea
, 1884-11-25
QUITE SMOOTH.

Logan's occupation now being gone, he
will open a grammar school in Chicago
Dallas Herald.
Mr.. Blaine will have more fun in the
next four years than Mr.. Cleveland will.
-C Chicago Herald.
At no other f%uaenal, so far ns known,
did the corpse ever carry on 50 hysterical-
ly.-Phaadelphia Times.
A fine old cat in a very strange garnet
Roscoe Conkling in the Democratic party
st Louis Globe Democrat
1t is understood that President Cleve-
land will make Dr.. Burchard Chaplain Of
the Tallapoosa. ~ Courier Journal
Alter all, prohibition prohibits-thc
Plumed Knight from becoming President
Of the United States Chicago Nail
The parallel between Henry Clay and
James G.. Blaine is more than ever APP
parent. Both are dead Chicago Neios.
The Tariff Question" is iiattening its
nose against the Democratic window pane,
Its knock will soon be heard at the door.
brooklyn Eagle.
The defeat of Richelieu Robinson and
Congressman Finnerty leaves Ireland with
out a single representative IN the Lower
House. -Nao York Graphic.
Even Chairman Jones doesn't think
the country is going to the dogs. His
Pittsburg iron works resumed operations
on Monday philadelphia Times.
Judging by the number of ways Mr..
Shakespeare used to spell his name, he
must have been employed as a compositor
on a morning newspaper.-Boston Globe.
The Rev. Sam Burchard is now fully
convinced that the only royal RS in the.
alphabet are the three old-fashioned ones
which stand for Reading, 'Riting and
'Rithmetic. st Louis Republican.
Belya Lockwood is a member of the
Washington bar. Its said that opposing
counsel got over a difficulty by abiding to
her as our sistcr-in lawl'-Augasta
(Ga.) Chroaicle.
As Mr.. Blaine is engaged in the study
of history he may find the word OF Mira
beau Of some interest: 81 could have
saved France could | have made the peo-
pie believe | was %yirtuous. -Propidence
Journal.
1t isn't the official count hal excites
Relva Ann Lockwood just now. 1t is
the distressing fact hat three cans of her
raspberry jam are mouidy on top, and
somebody has smashed the lid on her
only crock Of cucumber pickles. -PhiIa-
deiphid Press.
, 1884-11-25
BROTHER GARDNER THINKS
The Trinea OF Life Annoy Us Far
More Than the solid Troubles.

lIine-hilu CluD.l
Just previous TO the opening OF tho meeting
Sir Isaac Walpolo. who had his left shoe of
10 cool a bunion, got his foot In the way Of
Elder Toot's No. lis, and the result was n
spirited little affair, In which Sir Isaac had
his nose roughly used and the slider found
three of his front teeth ioosened. Blows had
scarcely been exchanged. however, before
both old patriots extended their hands with
words Of apology, and while Sir IsaAo fairly
begged OF the elder TO stop on his bunion all
the rest Of the week, tho elder was earnest Ia
his hope that Sir Isaac would loosen all the
rest Of his molars
(Which goes TO prove said Brother Gard.
ner, ns ho referred 70 the matter when thu
meeting had opened, dat dc trines OF life
annoy US fur mo dan de solid trubblcA A
sore heel viii gin a statesman mo- annoy
nnce dan a re- eleckshun. A bile on dc leg
will delay a kings journey. Tight butes
have plunged Europe into war. A sour
stomach has led to griev'u- quarrels among
famous mon.
Let a mans house burn down, OF an cpl.
demic sweep awny his family, or reverses come
70 his bizness, an In most cases he will show
his sand. Let u con appear ON his too
blister riz up on his heel-a tooth begin 10
ache-de cook strike fur higher wages or de
front doah-bell Kit outer order. au' nineteen
men outer twenty am all broke up an ready
70 assert dat dis am n cold world an life
amt WORT de libin'.
Let dis be a lesson TO US TO guard our
weak side II amt dat we shall 20 hang
ourselves bekase we can't meet n bank note
due to-morrer, but dat we doan' lower our
dignity in de nayburhood II We happen TO
shut do gate on our own co~at-tails. We
want 70 congratulate a man fur risin' from
poverty TO afiluence by his own individual
exertions, but we doan' keer TO be around
when he misses a burdock and strikes his
foot wild de hoe We revercnce gray hairs
In our counsel chambers, an We hate to sus-
pect dat de owners OF 'em give way TO tear
Of indignashun ober n shirt too high 10 da
neck or a leak In de kitchen waterpipor
, 1884-11-25
A Nrw ONO .IpEE.u

A few years ago, down in Ohio, it was
thought that a very unique scheme had
been discovered 10 cternally close up the
beer saloons. Some ol the wealthiest and
inost highly connected indies in the yari-
aus cities organized themselves into pray
ing bands, and day after day went into
the slums. If they could secure entrance
into the saloons they prayed, they sang,
they exhorted about the bar; if they were
unable to secure admittance, they follow
cd the same tactics ON the outside. The
idea which animated these ladies seemed
to be that their singing and praying would
bring the keepers ofthe dives to such a keen
and humiliating realization oftheir demon
alizing vocation that the impressionable
saloon men would forthwith empty the
contents Of their kegs aud bottles into adj
jaeent cutters. In this the enthusiasm Of
the good ladies ran away with their judg-
ment, for mighty little whisky, except
such as was paid for, was emptied into
the cutters. This lurid method Of throt-
Ting the demon OF intemperance was
eventually given up from sheer exhaus-
ton, but out oft grew what is now known
as the Womens Christian Temperance
Union. This society set about the work
a little more m~ethodically.
Two years ago what is known as the
Scott law was adopted in Ohio. By its
provisions the license was placed
very high and many r%estric-
tons set about the promiscuous sale
Of intoxicating liquors. The treasures Of
the various cities and towns received i'm
mense sums Of money from this source,
but unfortunately last month the law was
declared unconstitutional by the Supreme
Court.
The Ohio people have now hit upon a
somewhat more complicated method Of
suppressing the liquor traffic. On Satur-
day evening a crowd of anti-liquor people
assembled in front Of a saloon in Bladens-
burg, Knox county. After wrecking the
saloon with stones and fracturing the
head of the proprietor, so thot he died in
a few hours, they dumped all his liquors
into the street and probably went home
hugging themselves for their commend
able and praiseworthy conduct
The "Ohio idee" is getting to be a
great institution, but we beg leave to
doubt that the Bladensburg ''idee'' will
tend to popularize cold water theories or
raise its enthusiastic devotees in popular
estimation.
Il seems to US to be an inspiration Of
unqualified idiocY. which it would do well
10 conine within the corpoate limits of
Bladensburg. People Of temperance pro-
c~liyities elsewhere in this broad land
should continue Il be satisfied with the
old-fashioned. but in the end just as fruit
full method Of work which has been in
vogue previous to this latest and certainly
novel notion
The Bladensburg "idec'' must go.
, 1884-11-25
some Funny GIimpses.

ACaACAHC AAb1AAC
The Memoirs Of Lord MAlmesburyn are
creating a considerable sensation, and all
the papers are quoting som of the choice
bits There are very funny glimpses in the
private life OF Gladstone and Disraeli, for in
stance; Gladstone's appearance Is described
us disappointing, because 70 like that Of a
Catholic priest, and one Of his craEes In the
course Of his musical education was an en-
thusiastic love of negro melody, which he
used to sing with the greatest spirit and en-
joyment, never leaving out a verse. Camp
town Races was for a time his favorite
ditty. Disraeli appears much less cold and
apathetic in private than his ~sphinx-lfke Inn
mobility in public would suggest He CON
fessed himself on ono occasion, when there
was n prospect OF getting Office, that
he felt as delighted as a young girl
going TO her first ball, and, Rrcording to
Lord MalmesbuTy, was, when outside the
house, always in the highest state of citation
or the lowest depth Of despair, according to
the fortunes OF the day. A fine piece of un-
conscious humor is this; ADisraeli was at
the breakfast and seemed rather low. He
told me the queen had sent him her last
bookH
, 1884-11-25

TOHIu1EU SOuTndLI
There are $1,000 acres of good land in the
county Of Essex, England. which are tenant
less. The reason Is said to be that English
farmers are being educated above their bust
ness, and desert the farm for the city. AS
remedy for this Lady Catharine Glaskell
proposes that farmers and their wives and
children DO no longer educated, but allowed
TO grow up entirely iiitsrate and unculti-
vatsd- She also says that they should not DO
allowed to wear decent clothing. and that
they should be made to rise at 3 O'Clock in
the morning Hnd spend all the day among
the cattle in the fields. Lady Giaskeli would
make "A picturesque reformer.
, 1884-11-25

The shipwrecked crew Of the British
bark Benefactress were adrih in an open
boat, supporting life on some bits Of dry
bread and n few apples This was slim
fare and reduced them to a state Of great
feebleness. But Browns Iron Bitters
brings cnfeebled folks up rapidly, even
from such depths ms this. 1t enriches the
blood, tones the system and gives healthful
strength. Mr.. William Hardee of Ennis,
Texas. writes that he had dyspepsia in It's
worst form, but was restored by Browns
Iron Bittens.
, 1884-11-25

~
There Is q character in every step 4 per-
son takes" said q man who thought he knew
It all, so far as the science of gait was con-
cerned- when l saw you pass our house the
other day, Miss Clara, 1 was impressed by
the easy, independent freedom of your walk.
Such firm yet gentle strides betrayed the
dominant unconventionality Of your char
acter.n
He was a doctor OF divinity, and 1 didn't
care to sass him, but 1 felt bound in Christian
honesty to ask him: ~Was 1 wearing my
brown and black plush suitf"
He believed SO.
Then l was making a special effort to take
long, swinging steps, / said, 4bscause that's
the only way ! can make the c~onfounded
drapery swish right That meant exfgsney,
not character. See me in my new dark-blue
street costume, with its narrow skirt and In
tarnai strappings, and you'n say I'm a mincsr
from Mincsviile."
pnuonlnAa- Co,frlhuto- .nrlnnfu. ~.h-
, 1884-11-25

Colonel Houston Rucker, the well
known Southern oil merchant, Richmond,
Va, says that in 4 terrible case Of swelled
and burning rheumatism in his right an
ke, the application Of ST. Jacobs Oil, the
great p%ain-cure, gave instantaneous relief
and cnrnd him
, 1884-11-25

What n host of unpleasant symptoms !
Indigestion; lame back; aching joints;
sleeplesness; vertigo; WEAKNESS; no APP
petite; cold feet; pains in breast; night
sweats; chills and fever. Malaria brings
all these. Browns Iron Bitters drives
them all out. Mr. +. A. Glenn, Wallace
vile, S. c., says. Il had a serious attack
Of malarial fever. and Browns Iron Bit
tens restored me to good health"
, 1884-11-25

Meet at Odd Fellows Hall at 7:3O p.
m, first and third Wednesdays and
second and fourth Sundays at 2 p. M.
II. 7. GOODWIN, NJ. w.
JOSEPH GRAIN0KR, r. s.