Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1884-11-06
WELL ADVERTISED.
n Doctor Who Entered into an Arrange.
- mont with . Circus Clown.

a Doctor Who Entered into an Arranges
- ment with Circus Clown.
DIR. Postern has tried many ad.
vertising tricks. He believes that adj
yertising rather than ability, raises a
man in his profession. He used to
drive around town at breakneck
Ispeed. as though hurrying to drag
someone from the 9yawning jaws Of
death: and, often while in church, the
arrival and whispered summons of his
Office boy would compel him to forego
the pleasures of a discourse so deeply
interesting and to rush away through
chilling wind and mephitic mud to the
bedside of sufferer. These precipitous
drives extended to the suburbs of town.
Then the doctor would proceed
leisurely, and, in fact, waywardly, for
he seemed to choose no particular
direction.
Several days ago, while a circus was
in town, an advertising dodge worthy
of Ham Griffin, occurred to the doctor.
Finding the blonde man whose business
it is to make the crowd roar with his
medieval sayings and prehistoric
capers- as running against the
center pole or getting his feet tangled
in the banner over which the painted
young lady in feathery founces is to
Ieapethe doctor drew him aside and
said:
You are the clown, believe"
ssYes, sir. af-k
81 am Doctor Postern."
doctor, am pleased to meet you,
but you must excuse me now, as / must
go and dress for the coming perform
ance.'
..Just wait moment. I have
proposition to make to you. You are
not averse to receiving money for
servicesp'
chats the way I make my living.n
ssOf course" the Doctor replied, with
a smile that showed encouragement.
"You wouldn't mind making twenty
five dollars tonight by merely speak
ing few words, would you?''
s.No, Iwouldn't mind making TWEEN
ty-five dollars without speaking any
words at ALL
81 see you have an eye to business.
Now, I'll tell you what l want you to
do. During the performances, ask if
DR.. Postern is in the audience. I will
say: There's a friend of mine back
here who is very sick. He requested
me to call for you.' Then I'll quiet.,
withdraw. That's all you'll have to
say, and 1 think it will be an easy way
of earning twenty-five dollars
"I'll do it. Give me the money!"
SWAT until after the performance.
"Oh, could never find you in the
crowd, and besides it wouldn't do for
anyone to see you give me the money.
YnrI % N rpIv word -
perhaps You are right. Here you
are" counting out the money. Don't
forget now.''
MY business is never to forget any.
thing" EEs
A great crowd assembled, and as the
doctor sat high up on a reserved seat,
his heart beat in anticipated pride. The
performance began, the clown came out
and made the crowd roar when he
struck the springboard, bounded high
in the air and fell on his back. The
elephants were led away and the clown
sang '.When FIRST Met Maggie May"
The doctor began to tremble. us it
possible he unused, ''that the fellow
has forgotten his promise?' The next
moment his blood leaped. The clown,
advancing to the center of the ring,
shouted
rs DR.. Postern in the audience?''
The doctor arose and replied Yes"
care you DR.. Postern?"
ayes, sir"
IL have heard that you are the best
physician in Arkansaw and
THANK YOU" bowling gravely.
'And,' continued the clown, 81
would like to engage your professional
services"
81 am at your service, sir. I cheer
fully devote my professional skill in re-
ieying suffering wherever found. One
of the show people ill?''
Yes. You see, the hippopotamus
fell into a tub of water and has taken
the Group. That lemonade boy, doctor,
will return your twenty-five dollars"
A great Shout arose. Blinded by in
sdignation and shame, the doctor, in
trying to descend, stumbled and fell.
Another awful roar. Finally, he knew
not how, he reached the open air. He
sought his room, where, until daylight,
he walked the floor. At last he sum-
moned all his remaining courage and
went into the street.
Hi, DR.. Hippopotamusr yelled
some one. He went back into his room,
and when night came, he quietly stole
away, leaving forever the scene of his
downfall. -4rkdnsaw TrdUeler.