The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1884-12-24
Gbe firesioe.
About Manners.

spite of common schools and colleges,
in spite of the church and Sunday
school, there turks within each one of
us the savage the Scriptures aptly name
the natural man." Culture of the
heart and head may tone down his
ruder instincts, and make his methods
of expression more subtle; but however
refined he may become specifically, he
is of the earth earthly, and nearly re-
lated to his humble kinsfolk, the beasts.
He has keen appetites. He hates
bother. He loves his ease, and with
out his ruler and guide, " the hidden
man of the heart" he would speedily
served among the four-footed folk, who
enforce respect for their individual
rights by a vigorous use of teeth and
claws. In manners, even in the most
empty forms of etiquette, there is an
expression of the higher nature of man,
for they delicately express his rec
ognition of his own dignity and the
dignity of his fellows. There is
something essentially of the nature
of benevolence in good manners.
Pleasant Words" says Solomon, are
as honey-comb; sweet to the soul, and
health to the bones" 1t is a mistake
to regard them as mere accomplish
ment They are more than that, even
when the motive that prompts them is
self-love or self-interest They have as
absolute value as the bread and coal
a man may give his neighbor because
he is secretly anxious to have his gem
crosby published in the morning pa
pers. Few human beings are self
centered, and there are many men and
women whose estimate of themselves,
and their ability to do anything
good or useful in the world, is power
fully influenced by the treatment they
receive from their acquaintance. If
| they have limited means and narrow
culture, they are intensely sensitive to
the smaller courtesies of social life. 1t
is useless to say they are foolish. They
cannot change what they call their
feelings" or their natures, any more
than cat can clothe herself in feathers.
To them a word, a smile, little kindly
interest, are as vital and valuable as
food is to a hungry man. A certain
perception of beauty and fitness, or, as
Emerson characteristically names it,
measure" is expressed in fine man.
ners. Given this perception, which is
partly intellectual, partly sensuous, and
a shallow, selfish man may appear to be
well-bred under favoring circumstances
But the good manners that are an out
ward expression of an inward state
have certain qualities the counterfeit
never have, and one of them is tender
tact in the bestowal of social mercies
/ once saw good-hearted but fool
ish and ignorant woman made very
wretched because when she had moved
into a strange town a well-to-do neigh
Dor called upon her on a rainy day anC
wearing a rubber cloak. " Mrs. Blanl
would not have called the first time
dressed in that way, upon any other
woman living on this street," she
wept, and she was right. There was il
the lack of formality covert but Ger.
tain indication of the low place she oc
cupied in her neighbours esteem, and ;
woman of finer breeding and feelin!
would have spared her the humiliation
of knowing it. Fine consideration an(
sympathy are ingrained in good man
ners. When / was schoolgirl | was
one Sunday the guest of girl friend
AT church my friends father met al
old minister whom he had known year
before in the country village wher
he was born, and he brought the oil,
gentleman home to dine with him.
shy, delicate man, it was evident tn
minister had been willing to serve il
the waste places of the Masters vine
yard, where the hire was small and TIL,
laborers few, for his clothes were pa
! ~ hr no civ al n
gance and formal serving of the Dime
bewildered him, and made him nervous
With the fruit some finger-bowls wer
brought in, and, after cycling the on
by his plate moment, he raised ii to hi
lips and drank off the water " EXcus
me, ma am he said, touching it wit
his withered fingers, 81 never saw
such pretty cups before. What do yol
call them? | would like to buy one TO
my little girl" They are plain rub
bowls; | think that is what they ar
called" said the hostess, slipping from
her own. Do not buy one; | have
very pretty one 1 should love to send t.
your daughter, if you will be kim
enough to accept it," There was not tn
moving of an eyelash. The host glance
at his wife with loving pride, and fol
lowed her example. Even Master Tom
aged six, who was ready to laugh on al
possible occasions, and was Away
making inopportune remarks, gravel,
drank from his fnger-bowl, and slippe'
down from his chair without word
and | heard him say afterward to hi
sister, =" Doesn't mamma have Lowell
thoughtsl She's going to give him tina
pretty big cup, that's just like afnger
bowl with a handle to it. Oh, | hop
he'll never know what those bowls ar
used forp'-EHzabeth Cummings in Chris
tan Union.