Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1884-10-23


its choicest rest in constant exercise,
fitted from one point of interest TO
another. and grew so Luminous with
health and enthusiasm, that the pro-
fessor called her his electric light.
Three days Of the ten set apart for
this vacation had flown by, when the
mistress of the house appeared IN the
guest chamber with face upon which
was written the deepest annoyance.
CHOW we are in the nine hole,
Frances. she said. 1.-The cook has
lust received telegram containing
news of the death of fifteenth cousin.
She will take the next stage in spite
of all nv circumstances and all my
offers to increase her temporal store.
The president of--college Will be
here to dinner to-day, and all the
sweetness of my nature has turned to
gall. / told Ross not to invite Presi-
dent Lambeth this time. he always
has to be catered to--can't sit down to
table like a Christian and eat what
is put before him. | could make beds
and wipe dishes, suppose, and we
three could get along somehow but
this is impossible, because of mans
disobedience. Well, laugh" she
added, as her companions mirth
could 40 longer be restrained; but |
think such behavior in a husband is
actionable. Half an hour ago / need
ed only pair of wings to make me a
full .hedged angel. Now a cloven foot
would be more appropriate.
'Please let me tell you what to do, "
said Miss Lyman, calmly. Your
discontinue is my opportunity, you
see. We are told that there never
was loss without some gain, and
having demonstrated this statement
to be fact, / long ago rendered my
allegiance to the doctrine of compen-
satlon."
II don't see what bearing the doc.
trine of compensation has upon this
particular muddle," Mrs. Stapleton
replied. 1--WE might perhaps be able
to hire an idiot in this benighted
neighborhood, but that is the best we
can do"
81 was about to advise" Miss Ly-
man remarked, "that you have the
horse harnessed as quickly as possible
and then drive around the village, and
bring home as intelligent an idiot as
you can find. How long is President
Lambeth to stay"
"Four days-four dreadful days"
Find me a girl who can wash
dishes and work under my directions,
and | will gladly do the cooking. !
assure you that / would not mind do
ing all the kitchen work if it were not
that | must take back to college pair
of presentable hands. OF course my
dear, | cannot sit at the table with
you while your guest is here, because
| shall be obliged to see that the
courses are properly prepared and
brought on. The president need not
even see me-.
why, l will never submit to such
an arrangement as that IN the world, "
Mrs. Stapleton protested. NV hat
would Ross say2 Why, don't you see
that even if l could permit such
thing, it would never do2"
But when l tell you that | would
infinitely prefer to spend four days in
your kitchen than in any other way
that / can think of, will you not man
age the professor-who knows so well
how to do this-and grant me the
greatest privilege of my ife2'
Frances Lyman, you are a-a-an
egregious goose, and you really must
excuse me; but the statement of your
preferences has very much the same
effect upon me that the story of Jack
and the bean stalk used to have in my
younger days. / never believed a
word of it,
Then punish me, my dear, by
taking at my word" her compan-
ion responded.
Poetic justice that" said Mrs.
Stapleton, laughingly. We'll, I'll
see. Isuppose | can coax Ross; only
hen say, Why, my dearest child,
you ought to know how to do these
things yourself And here's the rub,
FraEees. Such notion would
never enter his dear old cryptic
graphal head unless you first put 1t
there"
Mrs. Stapleton if your husband
has that kind of head, no such idea
Will ever strike it unless it is first
written in CIPHER, and you are not
the woman TO take all that trouble.
So please calm your mind, and leave
your kitchen and your husband to
me. | promise that no harm shall
come to either, or to yourself. "
And so it came pass that the teach
er of the higher mathematics in --
college was duly installed as cook n
Mrs. Stapleten's kitchen. This lady
was successful in her hunt for an
IDIOT; Notwithstanding the non com
pos character of the temporary
scullion, every thing moved smooth
ly in Miss Lyman's particular PROV
) ince.
The professor, who seemed to Sc,
3 considerable fun in this arrangement
! got in the habit of calling upon tn,
4 cook several times daily, much to tn,
discontinue of his wife, who profess
, ed to see IN these visits the complet
ruin Of her domestic peace.
A II told you just how it would be,
, Mrs. St9pleton said to her friend
E but if that mau ever says to me
A Child, | wish you would learn to de
n these things | will box his ears, ant