The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1884-07-25
WIT AND HUMOR.

pred al the rate Of % for cent.
Apglomaniacs may not care mucl
for roval cup OF coffee, but they arr
fond Of royal-tea Philadelphia CaH
ave got my-lay-ria again" cackled
a hen as she looked down on an egg in
tho nest she had just left, -Merctan
4jag,.,r.
The cultured maiden from Boston
wrote to her friend that she had Just
uesn to hear Mr.. Joseph Emmett SING
'Iique-a bout
Yes, a boy may be messenger boy
and still possess lots of that sterling
quality called sand But it is not
9uichsand.-PHct.
Il always keep my weather rye
handy as the man said when he ex.
posed the little black bottle in his
ccat. uarathoQ Independent,
David thought he was doing big
thing when he slew the giant Goliah
with a sling. That's nothing. The
modern sling, of American gin, has
killed its thousands,
What does Good Friday mean?n
asked one Halsted street urchin of his
companion. You'd better 90 home
and read your Robinson Crusoe, "
WAS the whitening reply.
A person being asked what was
meant by realities of life, answered.:
"Real estate, real money, and real
good dinner, none of which can be re-
s'zod wifbort real bord wort -
-, n.ota so,L = ~.
- oVAnPG.Vo 't,'' q IS VI
mug 1aS'' ,H Uu'y oHe ul1lA1ou'n part VI
'e'ouu' AHl' y tno Same PetIou 0l
t"le 'uo' = Iefu-Ieo W LOUSY lIIe
d,int " '''' ''-- 49, ''''''-' '''-N -
~, ,,.
NY uau5u;ei' you ouSIt 10 nave
So-ue ann ID me- saIo burlington
ia.hgr 10 MS lnouSAAesS 4o-year-oIa'
p' am gong TO- papa was the en-
tGO'.S'U ,., reply i nave Sot my Deau
@'eauy
A conundrum friend asks: What
is the difference between Italy and a
boy who has penchant for shining
NJ trees" As if we didn't know that
ore IS sunny cline and the other
c"mo-y son!
A man out in Kentucky has found
that tobacco shortens human life. A
hogshead Of the weed fell on him and
crushed him out Of existence. This
proves that tobacco. in LARGE Quantities
is very injurious.
What i the diffaroroo l,o+,roo,, o ,r,
man who decks berself IN ,no o i y "G
Of ribh,n3 and one who na,;aI,ir 100 on,
5nras mi,f0rtnna9 Gn Y P, ,roa.! I Snr
brwson5 the otbor how, h mrT ,'.ool n0-
Yynkers GayeHs
g,ortirc io,rool sor-. ,v.uin.
c,n III - J'" 80 u"- ' ,I ,ot Ll.
I~ac"inl, fyo ~ "otS0 'n"T wv H. w. ~, ~
HrrTz2 r. soma nor r.r ,bat ono 6or we
J,aggirc fem OF a Jn2on Hnon Me- yyorI
look twice as worse"
A French chemist has discovered !,
process of incubation a prevent,
of hydrophobia. A Norristown man
trying to secure some OF the virus. |
says that eyerytime he goes home la
a. night he finds his wife mad.
TEXAS man has inventad @ -,
cline for WASHING dishes III d"osn
d,mapd five NIGHTS week orr n,
s.rreptitiouslv borrow its mistres
best bonnet for an afternoon nrome
ade, the probabilities are that il w
be in demand
Are Won familiar with prroo+,
as,ed vonrr 1adv 90 - ti,1i5 , ''l,',
nm whom sba wos ,rr; ,,l.-'G - 49,
nr ~ ..G GG vo1 80" %o' r wy ~ ~ u['
briobteninc mn 81 gradn,te6 0 ~ -
OF bis business COLLEGE, = ~
O.,n.i...
ono ,'t'Ll7 ~ 'Ht O'oG I Vi Nan
y - 'nt' t sue n ~ tH -o oIlt Guy III l
eO"u'ly VI iV0'gVV PoPul1yIoH iu"' i
No Plol '-s'-i't paSo-oad ciuo' l
Lo"u PeoP1o Vi tAl' metropolis are
o"sy " 9A' III inc sun ana listen
eighteen men quarreliug with an u,
plre.-haHSaS CITY Journal.
Little Emma came running into ,
parlor, where her mother was emit
tanning young Mr. Duder until NJ
Mary could complete her toilet q
come downstairs and cried out: &C
mamma! Johnny is dot Mary's {
and won't give EN- to her"
doctor, | want to thank Won
your great patent medicine, "
teIped you, did it?' asked the doct