The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1884-01-05
A DOGS LIFE.
A True Tale Told for Praiseworthy Pur-
pose.

attached to the police force. l found neither of
these occupations congenial to my tastes, though
they have some advantages, not the least of
which is ample opportunity for rest. Rest 1
regard as indispensable to the proper develop
ment of canine character of the highest type. |
may mention, l think, without being accused of
vanity that 1 was not, even at the beginning of
my career, ordinary cur, but the final
flower of a long line of blue
blooded ancestors without yellow
spot on them. Just where my soul was in a
former state of existence, 1 cannot of course, be
absolutely certain, but for various reasons L
feel convinced that it was in the path of pro
gressive culture. 1t is not improbable, indeed,
that it occupied the body of tramp. The
words tramp and Couture" may seem at first
to have no connection, and they are not pre-
precisely synonymous but tramp possesses
many of the attributes of truly cultured per-
son. A tramp is cosmopolitan-a citizen of
the world. l am a cosmopolitan. A tramp is
not proud; am not proud. He will associate
with anyone, regardless of his dress, appearance,
or condition of servitude; L do the same. My
most highly valued friends are slaves A tramp
can exist for an extended period upon the most
quantities of the richest food-when he
gets chance. I can do the same
Whether the inheritance of the family traits of
settlers, or the transmitted tendencies of my
souls past existence most influenced me to turn
my steps towards newspaper life, cannot say;
but, moved by power which I did not question,
drifted in. From the first, felt at home-felt
that at last had entered life where my pc
culiar talents would find exercise and be appre
ciated. Alas! had forgotten for the moment
that was under the ban of so-caled inferior
race. had at the beginning felt drawn to the
counting room-the men in the business depart
ment have taking way with them but they
proved too mercenary. I was neither ''lost" nor
found, and no advertisements coming in on
my account, their professions of friendship were
soon shown to be false and hollow. I discovered
shortly that in the editorial department lay my
field of usefulness. The attaches of the
establishment did not at first welcome me
as assistant, and a participator in
their iabors. They barely tolerated my pres
ence in fact, to put it mildly, they snubbed me-
Frequently in the early days of my journalistic
career my investigations into affairs were alb
ruptly checked by being propelled down flight
of steps by ungentle means-the steps of the of
however, this persecution ceased 1 could not be
an editor, but could study the mysteries of the
profession without too much hindrance
1t was sometime before-in fact, it is only
quite recently that have discovered the secret
of the strange attraction this life holds for me;
but from the instant the thought dawned upon
my mind have felt it to be the truth 1t is
simply this: That in the next transmigration of
souls mine will belong to an editor. 1t is the
premonition of this fate. | feel convinced, which
impels me to live the life l do, and to learn
all that may be of my future duties
say fate; l may add cruel fate because
there is little that is pleasant to contemplate in
the life of an editor | should like to give my
impression of an editor-it is allowable to give
impressions of a cousin" and why not minei-
but there are reasons why this cannot be. The per
son through whom make this communication
and who, through sympathy with my lot is en-
abled to understand my language would, proba-
bly,, object to acting as amanuensis while l
should tell all L know. L will merely say that
an editor is being who deserves much com
miseration-much more than he gets. He is
hard worked He works when others sleep, he
sleeps when others wake. He has time to
cultivate social graces nor to become acquainted
with his neighbors, to say nothing of his own
family. He has no chance to enjoy life because
he is slave. He has free tickets to all the
shows, but to go to shows and attend to his
duties at one and the same time is not possible
He has railroad passes, but they expire by limi-
tation before he can use them. With all his
he meets with revlngs and contumely because
he cannot please everybody. He grows old, care
worn, gray and bald before his time. With all
this, it can hardly be wondered at if to such of
the public as may penetrate to his den he
appears fOrbidding and unSocial. That this is
his appearance it cannot be denied, but in sim
pie justice / must declare that he Stimulates
an ogreish disposition in selfdefense. In reality
an editor is really creature of sweetness and
light, but these qualities radiate only among his
m TO ha Sbo In
all in his true and attractive colors his office
would become a salon tho, not saloon, and
center of attraction to appreciative outsiders.
AS to remain an editor and yet shine in private
capacity is impossible, he is obliged by gruff
exterior to discourage visitors
must admit that 1 myself am
too often treated coldly as stranger
might be by those L regard as my
future brethren, but 1 forgive them. am ami
able and seek no reward l often try to assist
them in their labors by driving off intruders, but
my wellneant efforts meet with reproaches, and
| am cast into outer darkness and cold. Not dis
couraged, l try again at the earliest opportuni-
ty, only to again have opprobrious epithets and
heavier missiles cast at me. L confess to not
quite understanding that trait of the human mind
which permits its owner to receive a visitor
with politeness if not cordially when he wishes
him in Jericho. Particularly do fail to see room
in the economy of nature for boys, and caninely
speaking l cannot comprehend why should not
devour them. l shall continue to do my best in
this direction regardless of interference. When [
see anyone of whom l do not approve shall
show my teeth; if he does not hasten away 1
shall bite him, | shall eat him skin and bones,
and manuscript too; am an honest dog, and can
be depended on to bite-bow-wowl
AS | said, 1 am undoubtedly destined to be an
editor. L know how to edit paper l am ia
miliar with all its departments. l began with
the reporters and know all the free-lunch places
in town. l became familiar with these, let me
hasten to say, during my connection with the
police force but it is really surprising the amount
of local news which a reporter can absorb in
these resorts. Let it not be thought that l or
our business merely /, for one, do not drink; 1
lunch can always predict when a powerful
editorial is to thrill the readers of the paper to
which l belong when the EDITORS brain seethes
with great thoughts he is usually moved to kick
me out doors. His mind works that way and l
bear no malice. The sweetness and light which