Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1884-08-15

The meetin all yelled. "Yesy' when
Josef went on.
II may ez well menshun that l as
soomed the name NV our esteemed friend
lssaker Gavitt and telegraphed thus:
ITO William III. Barnum, Cheerman NV the
Nashnel Dimocratic Committee; Does thu
Dmekratic platform mcen perteckshun or
free trader
"The anser l reserved wuz entirely
satisfalitry. 1t red thus:
ITO lssaker Gavitt, Manyoofactrer: The
tariff plank in the Dimekratic platform meens
| tariff reform, with tendency TO the Perteck-
| shun NV Amerikin labor by mposin heavy
dooties OH the mauyoofakters NV the bloatei
| Briton. Bare down heavy on the Pertockshun
tendency among your operatives.
| w. III. BARSUM Cheerman.
Issaker, witch hez small interest in
rollin mill, riz to his feet and yelled:
IL knowd it! 1 knowd it! Wv course
we want tariff reform, but the platform
is all in the direckshun NV Perleckshun.
Hoorayy'
81 shood also state" continued Josef,
"that when | returned to the Corners L
telcgraphed wunst more to Mr. Barpum
to be shoor 1 he'd not misunderstood
him, only yoosed the name NV our
ekally esteemed friend Deekn Pogram.
This wuz my second dispatch:
"'Wat is the eggsact meenn NV the tariff
| plank In the DimokrAtic platform? l ask as
farmin sekshun. DEEKIN SETH PoGRAM."
1.-The anser cum back very promptly:
".7o eehil seth Pogram: 1'he tariff plank
| In the Dimokratic platform is entirely eX-
plicit, IL meens tariff reform with an uncom-
promisin iccnin toward Free Trade and the
rite to buy goods, in England. or elsewhere,
wherever yoo kin buy EN- the cheapest. Ba o
down heavy on the Free Trade tendency
among your oppresst agrlcultoornl friends.
w. III. BARNUM, Cheerman.'
~ knowd it-I knowd i'll" shreeked
the good old Dcekin. "Hooray! we
have a platform wich meens free tradel"
Some trouble ensood. Issaker swore
that the dispatch sent to the Deekin
wuz bogus, and the Deekin swore that
the dispatch sent to Issaker wuz bogus,
for both he'd tho platform red to EN- and
they both he'd constrood it.
lssaker denounced the Deekin ez a
ass; "for," sed he, "does not Randall
NV rennsilvany accept the platform,
and isn't he a Perteckshunistp"
LASS yerself! retorted the Deekin.
"Does not Watterson, and Carlisle, and
Morrison. and Hurd all accept il, and
amt they rabid Free -Tradersp'
And then, ez these two Dimocrats
wuz THROWN mud at each other, the
meetin broke up in a row, and Joe Big
ler rolled off latin, remarkin that he
WIZ sorry for the disturbance, but he
wantid the platform cleeriy defined,
and he didn't know how else to git u
clecr enunshiashen nv wat it ment Than
by telegratlin the Chairman NV the ID M
oera ic Nashnel Committy. He shood
eJitly perceed to TELEGRAPH more NV
em soon, and wood hey ansers by the
time the Dimocrlsy NV the Corners
wanted to ratify agin.
Ef the good Lord in his infinite mercy
wood only take Joe Bigler to his buzm,
Good git along with the Dimocrisy.
here. He never appeers upon the suris
without maxim trouble.
He and that Po lol from Illinov to-
gethermana9e to keep us in hot water
all the time. Wood that the good old
times wuz back agin wen we Good or
ganize and invite en-, at the muzzle of
shotguns, to move. But them days hev
gone with us. Down in Mississippi it
wood anser, or even in Danville, Vir-
ginny: hut here the niggers are too
strong for that sort NV argument, and
our sperits IL broke.
lssaker and the Deekin commenst the
old lite over agiD, and heyn't bin able
to compermise the matter ez vet. 1t is
a cold world and full NV trouble.
PERoLEUM V. NAsBY
(In constant hot water).