Arkansas weekly mansion., 1884-01-26
COL. RIED'S LADY REPORTER.

reports, and the polICe-court man would
rather be fired than attempt a report of
the minister's alliance: but in the Inn
tied resources of Western journalism
where reporter is able to eloat over
a dog fight one moment. and in the
next penetrate the hallowci circle of
home, with all its beautiful and holy
traditions. and write up a scandal, she
Is a vast and monumental failure. | DO
mt mean this rs = slur upon lady Jour
naiiSts at large, but as 4 solemn warb-
ing to them that they had better not b,
at large in the wild, untu. orcd West:
and, II they have any ASPIRATIONS to by
all means coniine them to contributions
TO those thrilling ser ais entitled House
hold Hints" and Useful Recipes, -
which are to be found in all wcll-regu-
iated journals. The "litt"r.ug and
v.vaciOus p,rSo'.ls.ties p popular beyond
the Missouri, the tat rc iU,rcd 20 cX-
plain to a 20 pound man how his name
crcpt INTO the police reports. 10 LAY
nothing of the Inaccessible location OF
the free lunches, would all tend to make
Il laly reporter 'ii-coura-cd and wish
she was dead; while her close sle-ycS
and poclctlcSs icr>c would give the
other sex SJI.h ~ enormous :'dvantagr
over h'r i'll 1hr poser games ut the
Press lub that she would he reduced
to constant p. nury- These are things
which are prone. to be overlooked in the
glad girli>h cniiu>:a IN of the MON mt.
but they are cold, dcathlc>S fac, n! the
same
alwats told Colonel Ried that it was
4 Iso-t unnatural Thin" t. suppose that
Providence ever intended Il W oman for
Il rcportc:. 80 | was surprised and
shocked when learned that he had en-
rlo.cd enc. Eich was running the 10
IorcS 10 -. had 4 good circulation in Il
lively town, Ia" count. printing. and
WAS amas>inr so much real cStar that
few men stood higher that he on III" de
linqucnt taX-liSt wrcn he took this i'll
aIN iscd anI fatal step. He WAS 4 Yer,
large. pompouS gentleman. ard the srIS-
picion prevailed nj Dolores that he had
been Il great SOc!ct. man-a re- liar
butt"ril ily-l.a,k Fast and, indeed. when
the question whether it was good man
nerS To carr Il bowic-knifc in one ;
bootleg at Il sore. was agitatin~ the
best people of the town, It was finally
T. fei-rcd to him ~ the leading authorit,
on etiquette in the country. The fact
was, though, the toioucl WIS really rs
timid rs Il hare in tie prc >cncc of n
woman, and 60 Ildn t tel Il Guadrille
from Il quadrOon at twenty yards; and,
possibly. this diilidcncc and inability to
ar .ue the most trivial point with one of
the SEX led 10 n 5 employing her She
WAS very Young. V''r, prctt>: and had :,
SiuUI,Iariy cnntaing way Of talisirr. tl.,t
put ortl,uar, matters in the light of con-
fidential disclosures, and carried a Ger
tam suite, trcachcrouS fattcr. with ii
that sent an id:otic grin into the coun-
tcnancc of every man she talked to. 1t
seems strange TO me. now, that 4 per
son of the foresight of the Co'oncl corId
not have had some forcboding of his
doom in all these thirgS.
Well, the first trouble WAS about the
exchanges Now, ever body knows
thxt it is wcll-cstahlishcd fact that 4
newspaper with Il piece cut out will
MAKE: Il woman pcr.c IL desperate nm
ill she finds out what it was. Tee con-
sequence was that when Miss Nolan
that wa, her name ran across about a
hundred of them, all more or less NUT
lated b. Riei in getting mp his spicv
and orig nal editor notes. she settled
hcrsel ri hit down and wasn't available
for assignment for n Wee. After that
the Colouei read his exchanges i'll the
countln,r-rcom and h Il them i'll Il scared,
hal;-hcarted way under the stove when
ever he came in.
a short tine 4 ter that she remarked.
one day, in the oii-e, that judge Cur
ran, down ut the police cou:t. was show
inr partially TO ,he Eciir,c representa-
tive. and Red tod her to give Lin :,
,raod scoring. She CONDENSED her
wrath in one trcnchan, line:
Judge Curran is Il haze vi thing"
The Colonel, wno pride,l himself up
on Lis vigorous p'!s inalt:cs, turned
pale and fled to the noun. aims for Il
week when he read ;hc item; but the
Ec'ips ever after alluded Il him a
"hcrn and old Miss Ricd, to his great
&c ret anguish.
The next thing Sc broke out in was
mvstcr Gus little squihs. which SIC scat
tcsei through the local, and We're de-
signed for the edilica,ion # her bosom
friends. They wIr' such occult out
burs,S. for instance, n these: .kitty B.
: cmed to cnio;- that ride very much
with &. F.. G." Ask Geo &c K. abou.
that ring &c, Your friend II. waS in
town YESTERDAY. Ih'.Sc items created
grave mi trust among the honest
miners of Dolores, and tn rl!mor start
ell by the Eci jpSc that they were The
passwords for Il horSC-thief society. of
which Ricd was >ccrc.lv a III her. and
thus communicated with tie remainder
of the gang. was accep eI aS tn most
natural and probable cNpianat on. Of
,ouuSc. the o,onci writ! e | under Il is
bur his cNplrna' ions were received with
general mIStruSt Tie circulation of
III" Ne.rS steadily fell oft, and he saw
with constcrnat on that there was n
s'owlv spreading belief in tie COM
munity, frcm the extraordinary articles
that continually appeared in his col
umns, that he was growing gradually
ina This the Eclipse 3nsiduously
fcster'd hy copying the most remarka-
lie of item with some such brief foot
note as this:
The above is from yesterdays Ncrrs. Who
can administer To Il mind diseased:
Or.
We do not rcI roducc the above from the
NrlCs TO g;oat over a a fact which the pub
ic have long been co-nIzan' of. but q con
vino ng proof that il i now time for friends TO
Interfere.
Folks began to shun him on the street.
Old acluaintanceS would meet him,
shake their heads sadly and walk away,
leaving him speeches. with rage Ruin.
the Eclipse remarked, was the only
thing that stared him in the face, and
then plea >antly allied the attention of
the police to the fact that crimes might
he committed in the lonely and deserted
business office of the NeWS, and nobody
find out about them for weeks and
weeks
As the advertising columns shrank,
Miss Nolan grew in proportion INTO a
hideous nightmare that pursued Rled
in his waking hours and haunted him
in his dreams She was Ike an ''Old
Man of the Sea-" who had settled down
upon him, and he spent solid months
irving to think how on earth he could
get rid of her. A hundred times he