The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1884-07-31
The Absent. Minded,

A gentleman, while in church, intend
| ing to scratch his head, in mental ab.
| sence reached over into tie next pew and
scratched the head of an old maid. He
discovered his mistake when she sued
| him for breach of promise of marriage.
Another gentleman had a bad memory.
| A friend, Knowing this, lent him the
same book seven times over; and being
asked afterward how he liked it, replied
"I think it an admirable production ;
but the author sometimes repeats the
same things"
The author of the Spiritual Treasu-
ry," while engaged in that work, was
| called upon by a gentleman on business.
Instead of taking his name and address,
as desired, and as he thought he had
| done, he wrote the chapter and verse on
which he had been meditating; and
when he came afterward to look at the
paper, in order to wait upon the gentle.
man, he found nothing upon it but "Acts
the second, verse the eighth"
At a wedding, not long since, one OF
the guests, who sometimes was little
absent. minded, observed, gravely:
81 have often remarked that there have
been more women tlan men married this
year."
Robert Simpson, the Scottish mathe.
matician, was noted for his absent.mind-
edness. He used to sit at his open win
dow on the ground floor, deep in geome.
try, and when accosted by beggar,
would arouse himself, hear few words of
the story, make his donation and resume
his study. Some wags, one day, stopped
a mendicant on his way to the window,
with: -.
"Now, do as we tell you, and you will
get something from that gentleman, and
shilling from US besides. He will ask
who you are, and you will say, Robert
Simpson, son of John Simpson, of Kirk.
tonhill."
The man did as he was told !; Simpson
gave him coin, ard dropped off. He
soon reused himself, and said:
"Robert Simpson, son of John Simpson,
of Kirktonhill! Why, that is myself
That man must be au impostor !"
Doctor Campbell, the author of the
"Survey of Great Britain" was so absent
minded that, looking into pamphlet at
booksellers he liked it 50 we'll that he
purchased it, and it vas not until he had
read it half through that he discovered
it to be his own composition.
Adam Smith, the distinguished philos-
opher, was remarkable for absence OF
mind. As an anecdote of this peculiari'
ty, it is related of him that, having, one
Sunday morning, walked into his garden
at Kirkalady dressed in little more than
bis nightgown, he gradually fell into a
reyerie, from which be did not awaken
till he found himself in the streets OF
| Dunfermline, town at least twelve
| miles of.
He had, in reality, trudged along the
kings highway all that distance in the
pursuit of certain train of ideas, and ne
was only eventually stopped in his pre-.
gress by the bells of Dunfermline, which
happened at the time to be ringing the
people to church.
His appearance in q crowded church,
| on a Scotch Sunday morning, without
clothes, is left to the imagination Of the
reader.
A strangely absent-minded person one
day had 8 party coming 10 dinner, and
| lust before their arrival he went upstairs
to change his dress. he forgot all about
them, thought it was bed time, and got
into bed. A servant, who entered his
room to tell him his guests were waiting
for him, found him fast asleep.