Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-01-02
BRIGHT BITS.

DASANAAA AbAAOs
TEXAN marriage notice: mo cards, no cake,
no flowers, no thanks, no regrets, nObOdy's
business"
WOMAN is of a tender, trusting nature, and
this units her to keep grocery store That
requires somebody who will demand cash.
ArkdnSdS Irdgeier.
"CLAPBoARD suppers" are the latest Maine
amusements The felers all spruce UP before
they go. and the girls are said to pine for
them.-Lo2oeU Courier.
AN Indiana family that uses black tea be-
cause they are in mourning are probably as
sincere mOurners as though they wore Grape
on their hats.-Peck's Sun.
WHAT" says an inquisitIve young lady, sis
the most popular color for brideY' We may
be a little particular in such matters, but we
would prefer white one.-EechdRge
In Kansas, as IN Maine, they sell ''sea FOAM"
which n traveller observes Clocks like beer
smells like beer. makes drunk like beer, and
is the same stuff which IS called beer in other
States"
SHE-I am fond of poetry. He-Are you,
indeed? So am /. Do you like Burns? She
No indeed; they are EXPRESSING. But,
then, am not troubled much with them, as
ma does all the cooking.
IT IS said that at recent Boston wedding
the six ushers were chosen from rejected suit
ors of the bride. 1t was grateful act to give
the unsuccessful suitOrs an opportunity to
witness the life punishment inflicted upon
their successful rival.
RECENTLY when a handsome young woman
went to a shop to get one of those wooden con-
trivances that are used for MASKING potatoes,
and said: II want a masher," every man in
the shop, from the cashier to the manager,
started to wait on her.
TEST of affection: A lady poet asks, elbow
can tell him love him no mOreY Proba
bly, the best way is to get him into an ice
cream saloon. Eat five dishes, and then break
fba If no doesn't accent the sit
uatOn, you had better try and love him again.
You could never do better.
A woMAN's brain is of finer quality than
that of a man. Fineness Of brain gives quick
ness of perception, and we see that fact Illus
trated IN this: n woman can tell what anOther
woman has got on. at glance, whereas
man might study the matter year and be no
wiser.-SOmsrcitle journal.
Two doctors were disputing by the bedside
of patient. 81 tell you the liver is diseased"
said one. Nonsense; nothing of the kind II
is the Spleen" Every well; we shall see at
the post norton who is in the right" Great
sensation on the part of the patient, whom in
the heat of the argument they had quite for
gotten.
THE young man in South Yonkers who spent
five regular sized hours with his 'best girl'
on a recent Sunday night, and never offered
to kiss her ''red, red cheeks" gave as an eX-
cuse that he had seen placard on the stoop
as he came in which warned visitors to be-
ware of the paint. He was a cautious young
man. Y0nkers Statesman.
Miss MARIA PICKAFLAw talking behind
her fan to her sister)-"The idea of Dolly De-
butts wearing that helOtrOpe dress!" Miss
Jane Pickaflaw-''Why, it strikes me as very
becoming" Miss Maria (snappishly )-"Be-
coming or course! Did anybody say it
wasn't? But don't you know it takes fault
less complexion to wear that color. and for
Dolly Debut to appear in that dress is as much
as to say she considers her complexion per-
feet" Miss Jane-'How very bold of her, to
be sure!"
ALEXANDRA DUMAS was one Gay the guest
Of DR.. Gistal, leading practitioner in Mar
settles. After dinner, while the coffee was be-
ing handed round, the host requested the
great novelist to enrich his album with one OF
his witty improvisatIons. Certainly" re-
piled Dumas, with smile, and drawing out
his pencil he wrote, under the eyes Of his en-
tertainer, the following lines
Since DIR. Gistal came to our town
To cure diseases casual and hereditary,
The hospital has been pulled down
ssYOu nattererr here exclaimed the doctor,
nightly pleased; but the poet went on
And we have made larger cemetery.