Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1884-01-26
Our Wives.
From the London Globe.


The chartered libertine, in certain work of
fiction, who declared that ne ought to have
forty wives one for each of his varying moods.
may have flown straight in the face OF all the
prOprleties. but did not speak without q grain of
redeeming sense. Most husbands. it will perhaps
be said. find one wife sufficient; and. at any
rate, society has come round to this opinion
after fairly long experience of the different
ways In which the great matrimonial problem
may be solved. But, if the one thing needfuI
were to settle the affairs of humanity in such q
manner as to insure that there should be the
greatest possible harmony i'm the greatest DOS
sible number of domestic situations then doubt
less distinct wife for each different mood would
appear to be necessary. OF course from the
wife's point of view the deficiency lies all the
other way; and. mood for mood she probably
has the best of the argument. But as this Is a
discussion which cannot well be carried beyOnd
the stage of theory. it is sufficient to say that
the perfect agreement Of husband and wife de-
ponds very much upon the strength and varity
OF their moods. The DunmOw fitch was certainly
never given to couple of whom either possessed
marked individuality of character. An cqua-
bic temperament on both sides was essential to
success. mOmentary flash of spirit would have
been fatal. Complete accord can only exist in the
absence of everything which might produce dis
cord-that is to say. in the absence of wit and
principle and fixed opinion. The vast majority
VI HUI anu "OHlcH are SUBJECT TO as many
moods as the weather has changes; and on the
whole. it has been found that this consta shift
Ing OF the social weahercOck is quite cunpat ible
with an excellent agreement between husband
anC wife, who can. if they will. show at the end
OF their lives far-weather record for every day
OF their voyage, however the wind may have
Chopped and yeered. Indeed there are plenty
OF persons to be found Of either sex who are So
infatuated as to consider that little Disagree
iaent now and then is the salt of married life
afiordIng contrasts which. like the variations of
music ana color. prevent q dull mOnotOny.
At all events, we may take it for granted that
as we cannot live IN England after the fashion of
turks and heather, nor console ourselves with
spiritual wives like those which were so graph
ically described by the late Mr.. Hepworth Dix
on. ana as the Dunmow standard is SO difficult
OF attainment. the least thing that married
man can do is to regard his own particular ma
trllnOnlal venture as a specially happy and for
tunate marriage. This belief like almost every
other, Will presently tend to justify itself and
even IL 1t does not effect much good will GER
tanly do him no harm. There is only one equally
sound piece OF counsel which experience can re-
commend to YOUTH and that is to consider well
beforehand what kind of a partner for life is
most likely to encourage this pious belief The
advice is doubtless at least as old as the flood
and 1t has been more frequently despised than
acted upon; but it is none the less good on that
account. For. If our moods are variable our
wives vary still more: and 1t is worth a mans
"Hilc W dSh Hliiiscll WHETHER ne cannot. DV q
little fOrethOught, secure the one woman or
kind of woman, whose qualities hold out to him
the greatest promise of future happiness. Does
he want, for instance, the Wife who will be
always waiting upon him, or the wife who will
expect that he shall be always waiting upon
her?
These two types are, perhaps, more distinct
than any other. and it Is not very hard to tell of
young woman at a marriageable age to which
or the two she belongs 1t may concern the
whole life and comfort of man that he should
ask and answer this question while he is free
TO turn the knowledge to account. In no respect
il wife more likely to have her own way than
in respect OF her disposition to wait or TO be
waited upon. The restless. nervous, active
woman who takes her husband for lord and mas
Ter. from the altar to the grave, will set about
her work with so much superintendent energy
That II Is impossible to prevent her from making
herself slaves and her husband whether he
likes it or not, is doomed to assume the charac-
ter OF a grand pasha, and often to incur, with
out deserving it, the reputation of selfish
man But the lazy. Emphatic, comtOrt-loyng
woman, whose nature and training have pre-
disposed her to look for a thousand small at
tentions, will just as certainly get what she
needs from any amiable man who has selected
her as his companion. Many a masculine soul
OF average dignity and independence has been
converted by his love for such wife-and they
are mostly lOyable women. however self indul-
gent-1ntO the creature whom his friends are
wont to dub Betty and mollycoddle, even
while they secretly envy him his domestic felic-
ity. 1t is clear that marrying man should
walk into either Of these predcaments with his
eyes well open; for there is no place Of repent
ance on the other side Of the honeymoon.