St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1884-08-04
RAMBLES IN NEW ENGLAND.
Three Days Passed in and About
Boston Among the B0stOnese.
What Was Seen and Was Suggested by the
Vision.
Especial Correspondence of the Globe. |

Especial Correspondence of the Globe.
DAY NO. /.
have often noticed when met resident
OF Boston-a genuine Bostonese, so to
speak-a sort of weird expression in his eye,
an apparent longing for the attainable, I'M
attainableness of the obtainable, as Ralph
Waldo Emerson might remark. The matter so
prcyed upon me that finally concluded that
my presence in Boston was necessary to
supply the s'long felt want of the Boston
csc, and hence my first visit to that historic
spot, the journey thitherward to which l in
vited the reader on Saturday.
tits possible that not to have seen Boston
is to confess ones early education neglected,
but in my case concluded to let my sympa-
thies go out to the Bostonians who, while
they had Bunker Hill, Fanueil Hall, Harvard
College, ETC., and whose cemeteries entomb
many notable and historic men, still had
been without some society that could only be
supplied by first visit. Hence confess, at
the outset, my failure to see Boston at an
earlier period, and if my views of what saw
should seem crude to those more familiar
with the theme, cite the disparity of age
between Boston and myself. BY the time
catch up, and get to be as old as Boston, I'll
probably know more than I do now and per-
haps know more than Boston.
OF course the stranger is confused and
amazed by the labyrnthian character of the
Boston streets. Everyone whb has ever
written about Boston has written about their
crooked, narrow and Unfortunately winding
streets, and for a stranger to 60 there and
not do the same thing would argue that he
didn't know anything at all. The only thing
that surprised me was that everyone in Bos-
ton was not confirmed drunkard, for the
streets must mix them up so that 1 don't see
how sober man can eXtricate himself eX-
cept by getting drunk. Tom Corwin in his
famous stump speeches used to make one OF
his most telling hits by describing bis oppo-
nents as resembling the tortuous path of the
snake which,
Wired in and wired out,
Leaving the people still in doubt,
Whether the snake which made the track,
Was going south coming back.
There is no such uncertainty in Boston. You
can "wire in and wire out'' of their streets
and be sure you are coming back to the old
spot you started from, every time. All you
have to do if you want to go anywhere is to
jump into a street car and let them wind
you up and wind you around and you'll hit
the spot you are after sometime during the
trip. 1t don't make any difference
what line or what colored car you
take. It's all the same. The streets
will come and gather all about you in
cluster and you can fire yourself off
from the tail end of a car, and jump into
half dozen streets at will. You are even
in danger of striking two streets at once,
and might get business transactions mixed
by doing errands at two different establish
ments on two different streets at the same
time, and not be able to determine which
house you was at, or whether you was at
either.
Then again if you don't want to go any
where at all you follow the same tactics. Just
sit still ip the car and you will go no
where and land just wheret
you started. 1t comes SO near
jumping down ones own throat, that wonder
the prestidigitateurs trouble themselves with
their sleight of hand tricks, when they could
great deal better confuse and confound the
public by exhibiting panorama of the streets
of Boston. If one wants to be very profound
he can take street car to Scollay Square
every car in the city goes to this square
every trip and consult the statue
of Gov. John Winthrop relative to where
the north pole rises and in which part
of Che east the sun sets, and by the time he
gets through his brain vii be just about clear
enough to walk down to the bay and drown
himself. Every street car driver in the city
is a graduate of Harvard college. No others
need apply. To drive street car in Boston
you must be Typographical engineer gradu-
ate of Harvard. No one but finished topo-
graphical engineer can keep the cars on the
rails and the driver must be prepared at any
moment to take transit from the sun and
compute his location on the hemisphere by
mathematical astronomy, It's greater to be
street car driver in Boston, ten to one,
than it ever was to be a Roman citizen, or
even a ''noblest Roman citizen" 1t is
probably on account of the great Topographic
cal calculation with which they guide the
horses, that you cannot get an intelligent or
civil answer If you ask Boston street car
driver a question. Iflhis attention should be
diverted from his business a nome mt his car
might go somewhere, and it is the height of
the ambition of the street car management
in Boston to have their cars start from no.
where and land at the same place, while the
visitor who takes the trip is so tangled up
that he don't know whether it is Scollay
John Square Winthrop that he is looking at,
or John Scollay Winthrop Square, or Square
Winthrop Scollay John, or-or-I give it up.
The Bostonese will tell you that their streets
did use to be crooked, but that after the fire
of 1872, which burned over sixty-fve acres
of the business heart OF the city at a loss of
eighty million dollars, they straightsned things
out and then perhaps you viii feel as l did
that you were glad the first VISIT
was postponed until after the conhagration.
Even now, before you can say, "Good morn
ing Mr.. Scollay," in Mr. Winthrops square
you will find yourself crooked around the
corner with twist, much as you may have
been at the era when you was spanked three
times day, and landed among the Bowdoin
square Arabs, and if 1t used to be any worse
must fall back on the litany and shout:
s'Good Lord, deliver us.''
STROLL On FREMONT STREET.
Having, to some extent, unraveled the
tangled web of the streets, started on the
Saturday morning in question "a week
sinceJ for stroll from Scolley square and
Mr. Winthrop down Cor perhaps it was up)
fremont street. / was first attracted by an