Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1884-01-10
.Is pollrE SOCIETY PoLiTEy"
The Theme OF Mrs. Julia Ward
Howe's Interesting Lecture.

Mrs. Jaiia Ward Hove egd her leoanre
"Is Polite Sci ty Polite r. 10 8 tairiy
large, exceedingly attentive and hig hly
appIeoiatiye audience III ths Unitarian
Church Friday evening. Tho pastor, DR.
Henry K. WATSON, presented iha lec.crei
to the audience introducing her as s
friend, well-known every where by heI
pen and ths stand abe had taken upon
great questions.
Mrs. Howe Is a woman OF medium
hight, and tritls inclined to eorpulenoy
Her face indicates strength OF character,
though it is not severe, and it lights nj
pleasantly when some portion Of the dis.
COURSE is receiving emphasis. Her haii
is silvered with gray, aud almost con
cealed beneath white head cap. She
read from the manuscripts of her lecture,
closely, but always entertainingly, and
keeps up pleasant conversational style
throughout. Her enunciation was ex.
ceedingly clear, her pronunciation broad
and very distinct, with the eastern pecu
liarity OF finishing sentence with ris.
ing infection to the voice, unpleasantlJ
prominent.
The lecturer opened her discourse by
defining polite society to be that portion
of society which fixes the standard Of
tastes, manners and customs. ManLerl
are an outward form OF good breeding
and not like clothes, can't be taken up
and cast aside at will. Sincerity Is the
bsst foundation for politeness aud this
quality is bespoken by the voice. Flat.
terry itself is an offense, an intoxicant OF
vanity and should be abolished by q
prohibition ordinance as dangerous
drug. 1t is becoming less and less the
mode In polite society. Detraction is
unwholesome, and is not polite, and the
really polite people prefer to speak OF
others as to others. The modern romance
wears off what was considered horrid and
repulsive, which the speaker thought was
one Of the fruits of novel reading.
| With reference to the recognition oi
connection with poor relations, the leo
turer spoke with considerable emphasis.
| She held it hideous and most impolite TO
conceal these connections. If wealthy,
shs advised helping your poor relatives
| In position and place. Relatives, whether
rich or poor, are people to be proud Of.
Society, she claimed, is based upon
exclusions by the simple rnle of supply
and demand ii rybody can go to a
certain house nobody wants to go. Ex-
illusions, however, cannot be absolute
for in selections there will be one dull
person with the wise ones there is nc
bore but has a right TO intrude his
presence upon some freside or social
gathering, and he is sure to do it. So
ciety cannot make any DEGREES, and into
charmed circle there are constant coax
ings for admission, followed by reluctant
consents. There is continual fight in
society, a erowding in and orowding out
Neither is polite.
The lecturer advised the young to
learn from the older ones what should OIL
should not be done on grounds of pro
priety. 1t would save much trouble and
unpleasant experience.
In religion we all dread the zeal OF the
enthusiast who says, "Unless you look
through the same lense as do you cant
$780," Hs ia impolite. In learning, 1t Ii
not polite for one to impress you with
your ignorance or his superiority, itsis
pedsntry, which is growing less and less
common as culture is extended. The as
sumption Of individual merit by person
or class ia impolite and intolerable.
II has been shown that it takes more
genius to earn money than to spend it,
yet good sooisty feels obliged to apologize
for one Of its lsdy members who may
carp her livelihood as though it were a
great disgrace. A reverse standard
should be adopted, and society be called
upon to apologize for the idlensss Of iti
Idle women. ldlensss is presnan,
source Of decentralization to rich women
There should be a new division il
society, the working women, and idl,
women, and let the former occupy plane
elevated above the latte
The speaker was OF the opinion thai
Americans 60 10 the wrong place tt
acquire good manners by going to grea
people, initiating them and unlesrn
ing pelitehess already learned The
question of fashion was emphasized by
the lecturer who enjoined upon hel
hearers the charge, if any of them were
in danger of becoming wealthy not TO b'
fashionable. She devoted some time II
this part of her discourse and held tina
where worldliness goes to tone the char
acter it oorrupts the heart.
Concluding, the lecturer stated that
few persons are absolutely perfect by
nature and no one is absolutely polit'
without early training, aud there is nj
nature but can be improved.