The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-02-29
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1 "Now that man." said the hotel
clerk, running his diamond-hilted finger
down the register. and pausing at the
name 'Gurlproat," that name is Q
fraud. That man Is travelling incog.,
and there is something crooked about
him."
"Why do you think SOP" inquired q
reporter on the tra;. of fugitive item.
| "Why do think itp Why, 1 almost
know ;t-in fact, I do know it intuitive-
ly. 1t is my business to be familiar
with names, and the derivation and ma
tionality of them. Now, there is no
such name as Gurlproat. 1t is neither
English. Irish, Scotch, German. Swed-
ish, Welsh, French. Spanish, Italian,
Russian, Malay, Greek, Norwegian nor
Choetaw. 1t is machine name man
ufaetured for an emergency, something
like the characters in Dickens novels,
the Veneeriugs, Podsnaps, Weggs, Dor
rits, Jaggers. Nickelbys and Chuzzle-
wits. 1 am obliged to be sharp, you
know, in my business"
"-Are there any other ear-marks by
which you know this man to be a
frandp'
"Well, yes, have spoken to him on
several occasions. calling him by name.
Gurlproat, and on every occasion he
has appeared to fail to recognize the
name as at all familiar, and I have to
repeat it. tell you he is fly fakir
from away back. He is queer, and
you can bet high on it."
Nov, there's man," continued the
hotel clerk. pointing to another square
toed specimen OF caligraphy; that
man Jones, there. 40. Jones. he's all
o. X. There is no subterfuge about
him. He comes in and planks down
his grip sack, deposits roll of bills in
the safe, calls for stylus, indorses the
register, and there you have it straight
thousand dollars in his roll in the safe.
He is a man who will do to tie up to.
We have to be good judges of human
nature in this business, and are obliged
to be tectotallv and strictly sharp. But
Jones is solid with this house. He has
been here a week now, and / have adj
vanced him $3.50 or 5000 on his roll"
''You arc sure the roll contains mon
ey are you?' inquired the reporter, care
lessly.
'.Sure! Why it's an express package
sealed, and the amount marked in the
corner. Guests often leave them with
us for security"
II should want to know it was all
right before l loaned money on it."
pursued the reporter.
"Thats where you would fool your
self That's where you would insult
guests and drive away trade. But"
the sharp clerk spoke this little uneasi-
ly, lust to show you what square
man Jones is. I'll send up his BILL" and
the clerk proceeded to sound the loud
timbrel which summoned bell-boy.
''iiere, run up to 81 with this" said
the clerk.
While the bell-bo was on his mission,
the suspicious Gurlproat came up to the
office to settle his bill.
That's him -Gurlproat' sad the
clerk. forming the words with his mouth
without uttering sounl; "eight dol
lars and quarter, two days and a
halt"
''Hayr' said the despised Gurlproat.
1.-TWO days and half-eight and a
quarter" answered the clerk, winking
at The reporter.
you'll have to speak little louder.
I'm a triHe deaf"
Eight dollars"
Eighth
'.And q quarter"
'All right-cor-ect," and Mr.. Curl
proat rendered a ten-dollar bill. The |
sharp clerk spent five minutes critically |
examining and testing the same. While |
doing SO the suspected guest OBJ
served:
If Colonel James Gurlproat, of Mont
gomery, Ala, calls for me, please tell |
him have gone on to Washington.
The hotel clerk looked suddenly up,
and his face was like circus poster
gilded by the rays of sunset.
''Are you Congressman Gurlproat, of |
Alabama?" he inquired.
..Hay?"
'YOu are Congressman Gurlproat?"
'.No, am his brother l am Judge
Gurlproat, formerly of the Supreme
Bench"
He had mis- change. and in another in
slant the porter was obsequiously escort
ing him out to carriage.
why" exclaimed the clerk; ats
singular happened to forget that Curl
proat family of Montgomery. 1t just
beats all. Funny, isl't it, when you
miss mans name"
The bell boy returned at this inter-
esting juncture of the proceedings with
the startling information that A. @.
Jones had skipped, bag and baggage,
hook, line and sinker, foot. horse and
dragons. The clerk turned white, and
his fingers shook like splinter on a
rail as he suddenly went down into the
safe after the express package. He fished
it up, tore off the end and proceeded to
shake out-a generous wad of news
paper clippings, some of it gems of poet
ry. the balance choice extracts from
the humorous papers.-Teras SUtings.
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