Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1884-07-12
SATURDAY. Smiles.

ShtUfOdy sunless
Milwaukee man has been sent to jail for
stealing kiss. AS a Milwaukee man could
never get one without stealing it, the punish
ment seems rather severe.-BostOn Post.
Laboring men like Ben Butler are hav-
Ing great deal to say at Chicago Cincinnati
Enquirer.
The latest fashion in trousers is to melt a
dude and pour him in hot.-Pdris Beacon.
little girl came from her Sunday school in a
high state of Indignation because her Sunday
school teacher had told her that Jesus was a
Jew. WAS lie Jew, mother" "Why, yes
my dear" said the mother. q little dOubtfully
as if unwilling to cOncede the Objectionable fact
but unable TO deny it; II suppose he was a
jew" "But l thought he was the Son of Cod"
so he is. my dear. II don't see how then
he could be jew" responded the young sec
tartan, for God is Presbyterian. y Christian
Union.
"JOhn." said the proprietor OF seaside res
taurant to his hired man, you'll have to take a
spade and go down to the beach and see if YOU
can find clam; the one we made the chOwders
with is missing. Been eaten by one of the visi-
tors, guess Some of those city people want
the world, by jings, "-SOmerpine Journal
There is one thing about Butler-he can play
spuck with hard ball without bowling.
delptia Times.
The willipus-wallipus has made its appearance
In the Tennessee woods. 1t is said to have scales
and belches fire. is there mugwump missing
Cincinnati Enquirer.
What are you slowing Up for7" yelled
freight conductor to an engineer on one OF our
vermont roads. why, we've run over book
agent" "Drat it all. then, why don't you keep
onI We can't kill him unless the whole train
runs over him."-Burhngton Free Press.
$50 you've been to Saratoga, Mrs. Greene?"
eyes. and it's a regular swinde. Everybody
praised the water there, as being very bene-
ticial and went to work and had made for me
q lovely bathing-suit And If you'll believe me,
there was no chance to show 1t alter got there
The people don't battle in the water; they only
drink it."-Boston Transcript.
1.-THE number nine possesses some remarkable
properties" says an exchange. 1t certainly
does when worn by the uucongenial father of
remarkably pretty girl..-Bwlington Free Press.
The Good Of a Timely shower.
From the Austin. Texas, siftings
~ was mighty thankful for that rain we got
yesterday"
eyes, it did the corn world Of good. How
many acres have you got planted of corn?"
I've got no corn planted this year at all.
wasn't thinking about crops"
well, how. then, can the rain benefit yOu?'
You see, don't often get decent dinner at
nome, as my wife says she can't cook in hot
weather; but yesterday there was to be church
| picnic. and she fixed up lunch basket for the
preachers table, but it raired so the picnic could
not come of. To keep the preachers lunch
| from spelling we had it for dinner, and 1t was
| the best dinner I've had since we were mar
| ried. There was no end Of chicken and jellies
and that sort of aileviations. Don't tell me that
rain yesterday didn't do any good 1t was the
most refreshing shower we have had for years"
Everett 4 Wediel of Cleveland, Ohio, private
bankers, in business together for thirty years,
| assigned yesterday for lack o. ready cash to
meet 1 pressing demands. Their liabilities are