Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-01-01
OLD MR. SPooPENDyKE.

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This Time He Misses HIS Prayer Book
"Now, my dear" said Mr.. Spoopen.
dyke cheerfully, ''be lively. IT'S 1O2C
o'clock, and we mustn't be late at church.
Most steady?"
eyes, DEAR" beamed Mrs. Spoopcn-
dyke. "I'm ready. Got everything p
~ think so. Hymn book, umbrella,
and-where's the prayer book2 haven't
got the prayer book"
"Where did you leave itP" asked Mrs,
Spoopendyke, turning over the volumes
on the table hurriedly.
"If I knew where I left it, I'd strut
right to that spot and get it, retorted
Mr.. Spooperdyke. 81 left it with you.
Where did you put it? Can't you re-
member what you do with things?"
81 haven't seen it since last Sunday
returned Mrs. Spoopendyke, family.
81 know" she continued; perhaps it is
at church"
"Perhaps it is" mimicked Mr., Spoop
endyke. perhaps it got up early, took
a bath and went ahead of us. Did you
ever see o prayer book prowl off tc
church all alone Ever see q prayer
book hist up its skirts and strike out FOL
the sanctuary without an escort? Spose
prayer book knows the difference be-
tween church and ham sandwich !
Where did you put it?"
81 meaa you may have left it in the
pew rack. You know you did once, .
suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke.
II didn't anything Of the sort. ]
brought it home and gave it to you.
Where do you keep it What did you
do with it S'pose I'm going to swasli
around through that service without
knowing whether they are doing tlie
Apostles creed or an act of Congressi
Spring around and find it, can't youi
What are you looking there for? DOM
you know the difference between O
prayer book and the Wandering Jew !?
Find it, can't you?"
"Never mind it, DEAR" futteced Mrs.
Spoopendyke. 81 know all the re-
sponses, and I'll help you along"
"0h, yes, you know 'em all. What
you don't know about religion wouldn't
wad gun. ALI you want is bell and 0
board fence to be theological seminary.
Think you can find that prayer between
now and the equinoctial ?" howled Mr.
Spoopendyke. "Got any idea whether
you sold the measly thing for chini
vases or stirred it into the wheat cakes
Have I been chewing divine grace al
the morning? Where's that prayer
book? Going to get that prayer bool
before the Revelations come to pass
and Mr.. Spoopendyke plunged around
the room, tumbling books about and
breathing heavily.
81 don't see the use Of making such {
fuss over thing you don't really need,
sSbbed Mrs. Spoopendyke through he
indignant tears.
"Oh, you don't" raved Mr.. Spoopen
dyke. "You don't see any use in put
ting things where they belong, either
do your How dye s'pose I'm going t.
keep up with religion without praye
book? How dye s'pose I'm going t.
know when it's my turn to show wha
Christianity has done for me unless you
can find that dod gasted book between
nov and the resurrection ?" and Mr.
Spoopendyke spun around on his hee
like top and knocked over Partisan
jar.
swat minute, my DEAR" said Mrs
Spoopendyke, looking at him earnestly
Then she went behind him and fishec
out the prayer book.
SCOT it, didn't your" he growled
"Had it all the time, Is'pose. Wher
was it, anyway"
"In your coat-tail pocket, dear" an
Mrs. Spoopendyke iabbed the powde
puff in her eyes and stalked down stairs
leaving her liege to follow.