The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1884-02-06
NEITHER PIG NOR puppy.
A story 0ace Told by Henry A. Wise on
the Hastings.

dear friend of mine, who has never
failing fund of anecdotes, was telling the
other day how the expression of "neither
pig nor puppy" originated. During tho
Know Nothing campaign in Virginia James
Lyons met Henry A. Wise, his kinsman, ON
the stump. Mr. Lyons accused his antago-
mist of having changed from one party to
another with ludicrous facility. Wise. in
turn, retorted in kind and said further on
In my neighborhood dwelt two farmers.
One was hospitable and the other unsociable.
They were differently constituted by nature.
The first had an intimation that Hon. Abel
P. Upshur, then Secretary of the Interior,
would spend day at his house while visit
ing the county. Mr.. Upshur was inordinata
ly fond of roast pig, but his expeetant host
discovered That this dainty was not procur
able, so far as he knew, in time to CRAFTY
the appetite of the Secretary The othe,
farmer happened to hear of this and, in q
generous moment, ordered a negro to catch
one of his finest pigs and carry it to his
friend. The boy did as he was ordered and
forthwith proceeded ON his journey. Halt
why there was public house and Sambc
stopped to get drink of whisky The bag
containing the pig was put behind door
for fancied security. Warmed with the
liquor, the negro told the whole story of his
mission. Some wild fellows heard it and dc.
termined to have bit of fun. They remove.
ed the pig from the bag and introduced n
puppy in its place.
The negro shouldered his load, resumed
his journey, and finally appeared with his
burden before the delighted farmer, who
was profuse in thanks. He told the boy to
unite the bag and let him see the present.
To the CONSERVATION of the negro and rage
OF the farmer the puppy darted out, with g
lively bark. The negro was wreathfully
commanded to put the puppy back and &c
home to his master, who would be seen lat.
er. Reaching the tavern on his return trip,
the young scamps who had previously
tricked them piled him with whisky, others
hastily removed the puppy and restored the
pig to his old quarters.
The negro again took up his bag and
trudged homeward in state of mellow but
utter perplexity. Confronted by his master
he told how he had started with pig that
had turned to puppy and could not ac-
count for it short of diabolical Intervention,
The farmer swore that there was no puppy
about his and emphatically ordered the poor
negro to unite the bag and let the dashed
thing go. 0beying the order, out rushed
the pig, with grunt of delight at deliver.
ance. The master famed out at the negro
for his lying propensities and threatened
him with condign chasitsement. The aston.
ished darkey flung up his hands in desper.
ale protestation, wildly calculating
'Foie God, massa, when l first started
;hat was pig and it turned to a puppy
and when started again it was a puppy
and turned to pigl The burned thing
can turn to sc o. puppy whenever il
chooses"
MIR. Wise had no occasion tn make IN.
application tohis opponent. The crowd tool
it in unanimously and bore the the speak
er of ON their shoulders in triumph. -Aa
e1sta Chronicle and C0nstitatioaalist.