Millheim Journal. [volume] (Millheim, Pa.) 1876-1984, 1884-10-30

Who are you p the visitor inquir-
ed.
Il am the president.
Yes, / guess you'll suit me. |
want to deposit some money in this
bank
Money in this bank /! Why, it has
failed - busted - stopped payment.
The cashier has got away with.all the
money
'Yes,' answered the stranger Il
know that well enough. That's the
reason I came here.'
Man alive you don't want to put
your cash in an insolvent bank ! We
have no idea of ofresuming'
Il don't care straw for that. |
want you to take my deposit
Cant do it, said the president, firm
ly: You'd loose it.
Loose it :? Not much. Never lost
q cent in my life.'
What do you mean p
Il mean just this-that I'm the
unhappiest man in exist ence, because
I'm so lucky. 1t is luck that is just
killing me, and want it to turn. |
have heard that in my theological his
tory there was q man who could not
touch anything without it turning in
to gold. I must be q defendant of
his
Well, my friend, your luck will GER
tainly turn this time. IF i took your
money it would be thrown among the
assets, and you'd get in return but a
small dividend But won't do it,
Nothing of the sort, returned the
would-be depositor The bank would
be open again in week, everybody
would be paid in full, and l should
double or treble my money in some
way or other. Oh. if you'd only let
me leave it here L
No, sir
'It is always the way returned the
visitor, dejectedly Nobody will
take pity on me, and this abominable
good luck viii continue to follow me
throughout life. Listen, kind sir, to
my sad story:
When / was young man sent
my little brother to make deposit in
o savings-bank. Johnny fell down on
bis way and didn't pay it in. The
next day that bank busted and paid
but one cent on the dollar I bought
o lottery ticket, and won the capital
prize and received the cash. The fol-
lowing week all lotteries in the State
were suppressed. I went to a club at
o watering place, threw a fve-dollar
bill on the 90. it came up ten times
running, and left. That night all
gambling houses were raided by the
police. / found my way to Wall
street. | bought hundred shares of
the first stock that came on hand It
was 'cornered' in the morning, and
cleared a little fortune. A rich wild
ow smiled on me at Saratoga. I off
cred myself. and was excepted We
were married. Our happiness was
short lived In less than ten DAYS
she fell overheard in the lake and was
drowned. Her immense fortune be-
came mine.
Now my misery began. / had too
much money and | knew not what to
do with it. / threw myself in the
way of bunco-steerers, in the hope of
being swindled. They would let me
draw real prizes, and send me home
with genuine coin and greenbacks. IF
| buy piece OF swampy land full OF
malaria it will rise in price over night
and bring me five thousand dollars
foot. 1 once tried to loose a big roll
of large bills. I dropped it in the
gutter. 1t was ofno use. A tramp
who had seen me do it ran after me,
and put the roll-back in my pocket. I
sped like the wind; he went faster, and
1 was foiled. I offered him a thous-
and dollar bill for his trouble. He de-
clin.d to take more than fifty cents.
And now you refuse the trifing boon
1 ask. The world is in conspiracy
against me. Wonld that I were poor!'
Then the unhappy man went forth
from the busted bank, looking the
picture of despair.-Puck.