The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1884-06-19

BY pERrc.

II was pleasant summers day.
And Farmer Cone had gone 20 mill.
The house was closed, and all about
There was silence calm and still.
Except when Kyser. noble dog,
Lot out a sulen- vengeful roar:
For, be IL known, the farmer had
Chained Kyser TO his cellar fioor.
And Kyser was grand old chap,
With teeth that were as clasp-kntves sharp.
And wee betide the caller bold
Who neared the farmers after dark.
But why. you ask. was this damp spot
Fer thought OF for POOR kyser = lair
Doubt not, prav, the farmer wit.
There was a cider barrel there.
For In that quiet neighborhood
The, benzine flowed as water free;
Rum blossoms were the favorite flowers,
And each man I'm the town took tea
Now often had the fellows watched
The cellar door OF Farmer Cone;
But ever when the folks were gone
They heard the watch dog s threat ning tone.
But Ajax Brown this morning had
The little cellar window gained,
And, peeping closely. he had found
Poor Kyser was securely chained,
Then, running swiftly back again,
HIS gieeful tale he told Tom Glugg.
And I'm trice that cellsr held
Ajax and Tom and a gallon jug.
'Twas vain that Kyser showed hi teeth.
And filled with growls the sounding cellar,
Tom Glugg, he filed the jug full up.
While Ajax laughed and coaxed, Good fell
ler!"
Then TO the faucet each dry mouth
Was fastened for a heightened pull
And when they left those three choice friends
Ajax, and Ton and the jug-were "fuli.
Could not even see the dark-brown stone
That bordered IL the halt-raised bed
Where grew the peas of Farmer Cone.
Thus blinded with sour-apple juice,
or hpadlOnC
Half-smashed his head; but what was worse.
To their warm hopes. he'd smashed the Jug
Then Ajax's sorrowing heart ran DER.
Sad. sad thy loss, my fallen friend:
Rise up, Tom Glugg, and mourn with me.
Mourn that all jugs must hs'e an enu.
Then Thomas Strengthened UP his form,
With salt tears glittering in his eye;
Ajax" said he, we always have
A funeral, hic, for those that die.
"Now, AJAX. hic, You a sermon preach.
And will, hic, TO the singing tend"
And then they both began TO mourn
Ger that old jugs untimely end.
And Ajax mumbled DER some words
He called a sermon for the Jug.
Then Aud Lang Syne, with MANY "hic,
Was sung by blear-eyed Thomas Glugg.
"The benediction now wen have:
Youh have TO murmUT that, hic Jack,
But Ajax, overcome with grief,
Was lying fiat upon his back.
Il won't" he said. DO that yourself!
whats thash?" said Tom, all fiery now,
And then the benediction came,
In shape of Kyser hoarse Bow WOW.
Up from the cellar dark and dim.
All dangling was his parted chain:
With blood red mouth, and sharp white teeth,
The faithful watch dog kyser came.
Brave dog, he scorned a fallen foe,
And bounded over Ajax there,
While Tom, with great eyes bullying out,
Ran off, he knew not how, nor where.
Poor Tom made an uneven fight,
Nor glanced he to that awful rear,
Although he felt those teeth so white
Through solid fesh and garments tear;
Another awful lunge there came,
He felt il TO the very bone,
And then, oh, joyl the old gray nag
And genial face of Farmer Cone
We'll. boys the farmer laughing cried,
When he had seen all that was done:
when chain Kyser up again
I'll hide myself and see the fun.
But, oh. the benediction fierce,
Ger that Inflated gallon jug,
Made cider the most costly drink
Fer gurgled by poor Thomas Glugg.