The Pickens sentinel. [volume] (Pickens, S.C.) 1871-1903, 1884-05-15

lusnlng through
~.Aocts in tho town. Editors
...~not DC too particular about bearing
down light in their demands.
a Tribune attache the other day
heard skilled vocalist sing "Wait Till
tho Clouds Roll By" She rendered 1t:
"Wah Wnh tah ,ah tho %o claw law raw baw. Jawy;
Jawy, ma aw traw law wah,
| wan tab tho claw raw bnw."
A young beau at his sisters evening
party began to sing, ''Why am / weak
and wearyP" whom little brother
brought the performance to n sudden
close by calling out, Aunt May says
IT'S cause you como homo so late ovcry
night"
1t is very desirable to bo good
reader. a clergyman is said to havo
once read the following passage from
the BlDlo, with the emphasis thus,
And the old man said unto his sons,
saddle mo tho ass; and they saddlod
himr'
An article is going the rounds of tho
press which is entitled "Tho Umbrella,
in France" That settles it then. For
n while VIC cherished tho hope that wo
might regain possession of that UNI
| brclla, but as it has crossed the ocean
to cvado us, wo might rs we'll give it
| up.
A couple of pickpockets followed
| gentleman for some blocks with Wow
of availing themselves of tho first OPP
| portunity to relieve him of his purse.
lie suddenly turned into n lawyers
Office. "What shall we do now," asked
one. "Wait for the lawyer" said the
other.
Putting tho names of the streets on
the street lamps is u good thing. Noon
light nights, if the lamps are not light
cd, by getting out of tho tram-car,
climbing tho lamp-post, and striking
match, you may read the namo of tho
street distinctly, if tho wind doesn't
| blow out your match.
The motto of n young woman's So
cicty i'll Tennessee is Total abstinence
or no husbands" 1t is said that tho
members are showing II wonderful de-
gree Of determination, as the organiza-
tion is nearly fortnight old and only
thrco designations havo boon handed
in.-NorrtSto,On Herald.
Young lady Gust from boarding.
school, at dinner tablo(: "Please, papa,
I'd like leg of tho roast chicken"
"You have had one, my dear, and your
brother had the other" Young lady
Gn sprightly manner): ooh, sure
enough! chicken has only two legs.
It's duck that has four"
madam, you have destroyed IS
worth Of merchandise" angrily re-
marked dudo to a lady, as she seated
herself in chair in which he had de-
posted now Derby hat. "Scrvcs you
right" she replied, slowly rising from
the ruin; 'you had no business TO buy
n $5 hat for 5O-cont head"
81 sec you've got u colored servant
| girl, said man to another the other
day. Yes" was the reply. you
sec my wifcs sister has just lost her
husband, so, as we had to get into
mourning, wc discharged our white
girl and hired q colored one She har.
monlzes with tho mourning, as it were."
'Why, Jimmy" said one profession
nj bcggar to another, "arc you going
to knock of alreadyP It's only two
o'clock" "No," responded the othor,
who was engaged in unbucl1ling his
crutch; II nm only going TO put it on
the other knee. You don't suppose
fellow can beg all day on the samo leg,
do you.
Ethol II can't sec what Maud can
see in that ungainly, awkward Capt.
Heavitrcc Madgc: My dear, it's
becoming perfectly absurd. Only think.
The gardener told the cook yesterday
that he hoped the Captain would stay
another fortnight, for positively there
was no necessity to roll tho gravel
walks whilo they kept pcrpetuallv
promonading up and down"
Walt Whitman, speaking of AmorI-
can poetry, says: "Think of tho ab-
erto, Of the vast ensemble, multitudin-
ousnoss, vitality and the unprecedented
stimulants of to-day and Mere Wo
frequently think of it. We sometimes
wake up at midnight to think of it.
We also think of those things, in all
their multitudinoslty, in connection
with tho stimulants of yesterday and
then and there.
1t was ut tho Cataract House In Sioux
Falls. A son of tho Emerald Islo was
usherod into tho dining-room ut tho
dinner hour and tho polite steward
took hold of the back of tho chair to
push it into place. Tho guest looked
around suspiciously for minute, and
Ihcn said loud enough to be heard ali
over tho room: 'By tho howly Moses,
II yoz jerk out that chair from undor
mo III knock tho whole top of yor
head off O. ycz."
"What do circus folks do in winter3''
asked contemporary. The clown de-
votes the season to cleaning fresh
crop of jokes from tho almanacs prinb.
cd prior to tho American Revolution,
and occasionally writes for the London
comic wccklics; and the "strong man, -
who splintors rocks with his fist, so.
cures employment in cheap boarding
mousse at hammoring tough beef. Nc
doubt tho others find omplovmcnI
adapted to their respective talents. =
No1riStoaOn HcraM
The Salt Lake Tribune disputes tn,
correctness of the police statistics fro
quently paradod to provo tho supeIor
7 virtue of the Mormons. Tho TTbunt
explains by saying that whera a police