davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05
A Bootless Errand.

ne ArKanSaWyer Inc ArkaH-
sawyer who lives in his log cabin
among the rock hills has many pc
culiarities. He is hospitable as a
general thing, always glad to see
some one to whom he can talk, and
who has news to impart. Capt. Nc
Swish, who has been spending the
summer in the mountains, relates the
following, which illustrates some Of
the squatter eccentricities:
In the mountains the school season
is between tobacco-worming time and
cotton picking. During that limited
time very little education could be
instilled into the youth Of the land
and very seldom you will find schol.
ar that has got beyond Webster's
blue-back spelling book.
During my soiourn there a beauti
ful girl of IS, named Dolly Skaglock
went home weeping, declaring that
her teacher had severely reprimanded
her before the whole school. Hei
father wanted to take the shotgun
and wreck vengeance on the offending
pedagogue, but she begged him not t.
do so, and he finally gave up tha
idea, but he was determined to hav,
the teacher ousted by some means
The next day he got few of hi
neighbors together and consulted as t.
the best way of getting rid of tn,
gentleman, and finally selected me t.
go and investigate the school and in
form the teacher that his services
could be dispensed with.
1t was three miles from where
stayed.to the schoolhouse, and, never
having been there, 1 was not quit,
certain of the way, so l stopped at ,
cabin on the road and made inquiry
Of a woman who came to the door.
"Won't ye light an come in p
said she.
"No, thank you," said I, 81 want t.
find my way to the schoolhouse."
oval, go right down the hill thar
till yer comes ter that red ellun
what's got holler in it. Pap hid &
bottle O whisky in it once, an it staic
thar two years, an when he got il
out it was better'n it was when he
put it thar, an he went an divided il
with old Bill Smackley, cause they
wuz raised together, an married cous
ins. Yo jest ought to hear old Polly
Smackley scold, an her darter's jes
like her. They live down in the bot
toms, now, an they do say that ole
Bill has made right smart raisin
cotton, but, land knows, he's gettin
old an needs 1t.
rs it that far to the schoolhouse p
"Wall, as / was tellin' yer, go down
the hill till yer come ter the ellum
what's got a hole in it, an thar the
road forks. One prong goes to Dig
by's what lives on Briar crick. Dig.
by's cripple which don't 90 about
much, an his wife runs the farm an
tends the craps jest like a man, but
she tuck down with the measles this
spring, pore thing, an hain't bin able
ter do much lately"
"Can l see the schoolhouse from
there ?"
"No; but yer take the other prong
an yer'll come to the schoolhouse in
a hundred yards"
"Thank you"
"Say, Stranger, be you goin' ter see
the teacher"
eyes, ma'am."
oval, yer won't find him thar"
"Why do you think SOP"
"Cause him and Dolly Skaglock
hez gone ter town to git married"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

A new painting by Munkaczy, en-
titled "The Pawnbroker's Shop is
creating quite sensation. 1t is said
to be so true to life that the dudes,
when looking at it, involuntarily be-
gin to detach their watches from the
chains.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

An Austin colored man, with pro
truding eyes, rushed into Justice Teg'
ensr's office and exclaimed 81 wanted
Cal Jones, who Ibis next door to me
put under a million dollars bond ter
keep de peace" elias he threatened
your life ?" He has done dat berry
ding. He said he war gwine ter fill
the next niggah he found after dark
in his hen house plum full of buck.
shot.-Texas Siftings,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

Doctor (who had just seen the pa
tien)-"He's no worse, but, (gravely,
the question will no doubt soon arise
as to the advisability of tapping him. y
Mother-in-law-"O, doctor, don't say
that. Nothing was ever tapped in
this house that lasted over week W-
t.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

"What is rarer than a day in
June?" asks contemporary. Why,
hang it, man, the payment of sub.
scriptions to this paper is so rare that
it is almost raw Paris Beacon.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

In Chicago a boy has been discover
ed whose heart is on the right side of
his body instead of on the left. No
one will ever be able to say of him,
ellis heart is not in the right place. -
Judge.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

A young woman has been found in
New York who can sing baritone,
tenor, soprano and contralto. To add
to the horrors of the presidential
campaign, it is announced that she
will soon appear in public.-Lowell
Citizen.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

He-"I want you to understand,
Miss, that you can't make a fool of
me-" She-"I am not so irreverent
as to suppose that could improve on
the divine handiwork. ."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

John b. Cough says that Lyman
Beecher, father of Henry Ward, af
ter a hard days work, used to get out
his violin and fiddle himself to sleep.
How the neighbors got to sleep is not
stated.-Chicago News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

"How silent the stars are tonight,
George" she said softly, gazing at
them over his shoulder. "Y-yes,"
he replied, "but do you think they are
any more silent than usual f-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05
Advertising Rates.

business Cards. year, dollar for every line.
local Notices ten cents per line for each insertion
and all notices continued for three months or longer,
. discount Of 25per cent.
Advertisements unaooompanicdby by verbal or written
directions will be published three months
Advertisements, under contract, ordered out bs
fore expiration Of time, will be charged full rates.
40 paper discontinued until all arrearages are paid
e4cept at the option Of the publisher.
Transient advertisements must be paid in advance
sSS-Torms CASH, payable quarterly.
Only Metal Cuts inserted.
Prices and Terms alike to all.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

An elderly gentleman and his wife
from the rural districts were coming
into Evansville one night this week,
They were in the smoking car, each
one occupying a separate seat. The
old man had crowded down, trying to
rest with his head resting on the iron
arm of the seat. The car gave. a
sudden jerk and off rolled the old
gent. A heavy grunt announced his
downfall, then the passengers were
thrown into q hearty laugh by his
low, earnest remark: "Don't kick
me out of bed Sallie, don'tl You
are alters a-doin that l'-Evansville
Argus.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05
WIT AND HUMOR.

Can a cat count? asks Connecti-
cut paper Well, what would a
catamount to if it couldn't?-Boston
Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

Grief is a queer passion. 1t in
creases the signs, and still causes one
to pine away.-Marathon Indepen-
dent.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

The worst pun OH record is reported
at this Office as coming from an attor-
ney of this city. A man had been
arrested for stealing, and the attorney
was asked about it. "What is he
charged with ?" was his first inquiry
Stealing money" was the reply
"How much ?" "Ten cents" ooh,
is that itH Well, he ought to be sent
to the penny-ten-tiary." > Merchant
Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

Adolf Dalloz, carriage manufactur-
er, Buffalo, says: II was troubled
with nausea, sick headache and gen.
eral debility. Burdock Blood Bitters
cured me"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05

Drawing room cars morning and evening trains
between Bay City and Detroit, extra charges only
25 cents.
Night express east runs Sunday night instead Of
Saturday All other trains daily except Sunday.
SANFORD keller, Sup't
w. ID. HITCUCOCK,
Ticket Agent, Alpena, Mich.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05
Flint & Pere Marquette R. R.

The shortest, quickest, and most reliable route TO
and from Detroit, Toledo, Cleveland. Cincinnati,
Saginaw and Bay City.
GoISG EAST, SOUTH AND WEST.
cave Alpona daily, except Sunday, by Alpena
Bay City steamers, at q. IN.
aorNa eorfTu-FAgT.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-11-05
MEGHIGANC CE.NlTR7,A.,I.L!. Al.
The Niagara Falls Route.

Arrival and departure of trains noted below al
follows:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
THE ROAD NORTH.

The Currie MinnesOtian says:
The ADVANCE, which by the way has
always been the best railroad authority
of any paper in this part of the country
has almost weekly for the last five years
expressed its confidence in the ultimate
completion of the road now surveyed
through this blace. In all of it's other
predictions it has been right and it has
the best of arguments in its favor. II
the B. G. r. & N. did not intend to
build this road they would not have
gone to the expense of Surveying it.
The route is certainly one of the best in
the west. 1t is only short gap to lie
filled which will connect several of the
great railroad systems of the Northwest.
Railroads are not built in day and we
must give them little time. It has
been only year since the line was sur
veyed and during that time the COM
pany has built about two hundred miles
Of road, none of which interferes in the
least with this very important line.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
IMPORTANCE OF THE ROAD NORTH.

1MfOltA "A NCEOF AAE hOAD NOt1H.
The Fulda Republican says:
The Worthington ADVANCE devotes
| 4 column or more to railroad matters
in reply to an article in the Luverne
Herald, and closes with the following
predictions:
l. Another road into Minneapolis
and St. Paul nearly as short us our
present st. Panl and Omaha road.
2. A road tapping the Northern Pa
citic country at Fargo by connecting
with the Fargo Southern.
a road to Water:Own and Bis
mark by tapping the Minneapolis & st.
Louis G5 miles north Of Worthington.
4. n line ultimately extending the
B. G. II. & n. as nearly due northwest
AS possible, shortening the route over
20 miles, and making the main airline
through Worthington.
Fulda being directly on the line with
any road running north it will of course
come here. A north and south road is
very needful for the upbnilding OF our
town. The better railroad facilities we
have the greater will he our ability to
gain prominence. The more routes by
which visitors can come and see us, the
more will come; and the larger number
that comes the larger will be the mum.
Der that will remain with us. All we
ask is for people to come and see US.
No one can come here without becom.
ing deeply impressed with the country
and her natural resources. 1t is only
necessary that people come to see the
country. A large number OF those who
do come secure 4 piece of land before
returning. and they will be instrument
al in getting others to come. Quite a
number of farms have already been
bought this fall by people from abroad,
and before the year closes many more
will have been bought.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

Delegates Of the FIFTH, District met
in caucus and nominated u. Shell for
County Commissioners.
The 4th Dist. presented no name for
County Commissioner. there being but
two delegates present from that distric:
and left it for the Convention to pro-
ceed in the matter as it saw fit. 1t was
the sense of the Convention that the
Chairman of the County Committee
should call IL caucus of the voters of
said district to put in nomination Il
candidate for County Commissioners.
On motion, adjourned.
&. II. SMITH, Chairman.
S. 5. HAIsLET, Secretary.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
ON THE SIBLEY ROUTE

The gang of track layers who put the
road down past Sibley, completed the
track between Luverne and Pipestone.
The gang laying track northwest from
PipeStOne have over 80 miles Of it com
pleted, 50 that only about so miles re-
mains to he laid before it is completed
through to Watertown, Dakota. 1t is
thought that 10y Nov. lst this track will
be laid.-Sibley Gazette.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

Chattel Mortgage Blanks. A fresh
lot Of Chattel Mortgage blanks just
printed and for sale at the ADVANCE.
This is the same form used heretofore,
approved by our attorneys and bankers,
and improved as to type and press work.
Call and get q supply.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
RAILROAD NEWS.

a line is being surveyed from Sioux
Falls to Rock Rapids, t." lie called the
Sioux Falls, Iowa and Northern. 1t is
understood to be a b. G. r. and n.
road.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

THE COUNTY NOMIVA TJONS.
The report of the County Convention
will be found in another column. At
torney L. NJ. Lange received the nomi-
nation for County Attorney. MIR.
Lange has practiced law here for over
year and has already become we'll es.
tablished as an able aud we'll read at
torney.
There was no fight made upon Judge
Wilson or his record, which has been
satisfactory, but rs the Judge has
served two terms and as his practice
has become quite extensive in this and
the adjoining counties, the Convention
thought it would be the handsome
thing to tender the nomination to Mr..
Lange.
ID. Shell was nominated for County
Commissioner from this district for
the third term. Shells popularity and
efficiency was too much for him. He
made strenuous effort to avoid re-
nomination but the demand was so
unanimous that lie couldn't avert it.,
dodge it or resist it.
|. I. Durfee received the nomination
for Court Commissioner, an Office which
he is we'll fitted to fill from long train
ing as 4 municipal Justice.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
BOARD or I'RIDE

The Worthlngton Board Of Trade
appears to be dead rooster in the pit
Last year there were frequent meet
lngs, and, as Il consequence. Il lively i'll
tereSt WAS kept up in our material de.
vclopment. This year there has been
Dut one Ortwo meetings, and, as con-
sequence, the town Seems to be drift
ing aimlessly, every fellow for himself
and the old scratch take the hindmos. :.
No wonder other towns are getting
away will, the business aud the
''bOOms.' No wonder WorthipgtOn
people drift apart, or drop essentials to
quarrel over non-essentials and imprac-
tical isms and ologies.
If there is Il set of officers of the
Board still in existence they ought to
be called together by the citizens and
set to work or asked to resign and give
place to men who will keep the Board
alive.
What the Board should have is a
convenient room into which samples
of our crops can be taken and put on
exhibition. Tthe walls should he lined
with the best specimens of our pro-
ducts, and when a land seeker or
. stranger comes ''within our gates,"
take him there and show him what we
can raise. Prove it to him on the spot
Meet once week, or twice Il month
at least, and talk our interests over if
nothing more. Scores of valuable sug-
gestions will thus lie drawn out and
many of them will materialize into
something practical.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

Do not for a moment let your conf
dence betray you into supposing your
self incapable Of mistake. It is indeed
serious blunder to refuse to take DR..
Bulls Cough Syrup when you even sus-
pect you have taken cold.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
ADULTERATION or FLOUR.

ADOLlEtAl1OV OF TLOON.
EDITOR RADvANCE:-Some months past
Mr.. T. J. Simpson, proprietor of Okabe-
ma mills, stated in circular that the
flour made at the Okabena mills was Il
pure article and that there were no
chemicals used to make the flour white
or the bread white when baked. It
seems that the people are possessed of
the idea that the whitest -four is the
best -four, which led the millers to make
every effort in their power to make the
flour white. First. by casting all the
germ out because it is yellow, when in
fact it is the very best part of the flour.
Then comes the adulteration by chemi-
calls for the same purpose, to make the
bread white, when in fact the best -four,
and the highest priced flour, is not the
white flour, and the leading mill jour
nails have asserted that the whiteness
in flour is no longer Il guarantee of its
purity or its value, and that pure -four
made from the whole berry is not pos
sessed of that very white, chalky ap-
pearance 50 often seen in some of the
popular brands of flour. Good, sweet,
moist bread made of whole wheat -four
is much more palatable and healthy
than the dry, chaIky, white bread which
has grown in favor with many who
have never taken the trouble to fully
investigate the subject.
While there are many chemicals used
in this business that are kept Il secret,
and are not known to the public, we
will give 4 quotation below from the
Millers Review, of Philadelphia, of
August 18th, 1884, which will throw
some light on the subject: A great
many millers use ingredients such as
alum and bicarbonate of soda in grind
ing, and some use sal prunelle. The
latter will prevent glazing, and the for
mer will unquestioDably make flour a
little winter, especially the flour from
poor wheat. Common salt is also good,
but this should be put in the -four be-
fore going into the barrel. There is no
doubt at all about its making the flour
white, and hardening the gluten. 1t
will also preserve the -four and cause it
to absorb and retain larger amount of
water than it would ordinarily hold
without it. Powdered alum acts simi.
larly to salt, but in a more marked de-
gree. A small quantity of it will i'm.
prove bad or damaged -four and bring
up it's appearance to the whiteness of a
good flour. The quantity generally
used is about three ounces to barrel
of flour. OF course, these facts are stat.
ed without recommending the practice.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
WELL REWARDED.

A liberal reward will be paid to any
party who will produce case of liver,
kidney or stomach complaint that Elec
trio Bitters will not speedily cure
Bring them along, it will cost you
nothing for the medicine if it fails to
cure, and you will be we'll rewarded
for your trouble besides. All blood
diseases, bilieusness. jaundice. consti-
patton, and general debility are quickly
cured. Satisfaction guaranteed or
meney refunded. Price only so cents
per bottle. For sale by G. W. Smith,
Worthington, MINI. S
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

Send Money by American
Express Co. Money Orders.
Receipts given. Money refunded if
Orders are lost. Sold vt all offices of
the Co. Payable at 6 800 places. Rates
TO $5-5c: S10-Sc: $2O-1Oc: $40-l5c:
$5O-2Oc. 38-3m
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
NOT Il NATIONAL QUESTION.

Blaine has the knack of hitting the
nail squarely on the head when lie
speaks or acts:
The issue on the temperance amend
ment to the constitution has been very
properly and very rigidly separated from
the Political contest of the State. Many
democrats have voted for it and some
republicans have voted against it. The
republican party, by the desire Of lead
ing temperance men, took no action as
Il party on the amendment. For myself,
I decided not to vote at all on the qucs.
tion. l took this position because am
chosen by the republicans as II repre-
sentative Of national issues. and 10y no
act Of mine shall any question be Oh
truded in the national campaign which
belongs properly to the domain of the
state politics. Certain advocates of
prohibition ale each seeking to drag the
issue into the national canvass, and
thus tending to exclude from popular
consideration questions which press
for national decision.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

The Window Reporter was 13 years
old the other day, one year older than
the ADVANCE. Huntington has stuck
to it through thick and thin. has acu.
mulated fine property, and has made
the Reporter success financially and
every other way. There are only few
Of US old first settlers left in charge of
newspapers. Huntington, we are
among the F. F.s,
Ny daughter has taken the medicine
faithfully, according to directions, and
her health and spirits are now perfect.
The humor is all gone from her face.
wish every anxious mother might
know what blessing Ayers Sarsapar-
lila is in such cases.
The Luverne Herald says it has been
compelled to ask several of its patrons
to take less space for advertising than
their orders call for, and it hopes to
meet the demand for space next week.
Business men over that way must have
a ''superstition" that advertising pays.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
LINEN RAKING POwDERS

LIME IN BAkING POW DEKS.
Prof. r. A. Witthaus, NJ. D., Medic.
al University, Buffalo, N. Y, who is
the highest authority, says that "C..lci.
um Tartrate Improperly called Tar.
trate Of Lime). advertised as the lime
found in Baking Powders is derived
from the wines that produce Cream OF
Tartar. It is q constituent of the grape
and other fruits, and is absolutely
harmless.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
HOMES IN TILE WES1.

Porsons looking westward for homes
can procure full information concern
Ing tho GARDEN SPor Of Iowa =
Minnesota, by subscribing for Il
Worthington ADVANCE, published at
Worthtngton. Minneso:a. Send 81 for
one year: 81 for six months, and 50
cents for three months. to ADvANck
Worthington. Mobiles Co., Minnesota.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02

OUR BLAINE MOTTO.
James G. Blaine, a man of the people,
selected by the people to administer the
government for the people.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
THE NEW
Horse Book.
Il A TREATISE ON THE
Horse
AND HIS
DISEASES, H IS;
r. BY
0r r Randall ~

Or. B. J. Kendall E. Co.,
Enosburgh Falls, VT.
REVISED ED1TION-6 -65O, 600 ALREADY SOLD
This work contains an "Index of Diseases,
winch gives the symptoms, cause and best treat.
ment of each; !! table giving all the principal
rags used for the horse, with tl'e ordinary diose
In engraving Of the horses teeth at different
::ges, with rules for telling the age Of a horse
lie book contains
IS ENGRAVINGS
Showing tue various positions assumed by the
horse !" Illness symptoms of disease, etc, and
One Hundred Pages
,s OF u Tie en- most valuable read:ng matter dcscrip
with remedies; and i rare collection or recipes
and much other valuable mformatiom. The book
= worth Ten TINES ITS PRICE and is sold for the
az CENTS.
The great difficulty has been with works OF
thls matu OF any practical value, that the price
mas Decn ab)ve what most horsemcn and far
mers cared to pay and they have therefore no,
! secured wide circulation, and Il deal OF igno
rance respecting the ailments of tile horse ha:
| existed and does exist. But the exceedingly low
price OF this book places reliable and stan.iart
work within the reach Of every person who own:
= horse.
"ihe Horse and His diseases" is stoutl,
bound III paper cover, and very neatly and tasti
| ~ gotten up. Some idea OF it's usefulness ant
have al sn been sod kbSMn 0rGers sa ssn
promptly filed. ' ~
Price IS Cents per Copy,
Or five copies for One Dollar.
| We give below few extracts from the man,
| statements received from prominent horsemei
concerning this book:
/ ~ have hOnpht hOOES from FuU kEok
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1884-10-02
--------- ----------A-
THE T41byFF Nv 4 N

IHE 1'AlsIFFI IN Il NUTSHELL.
Dubuque (Iowa) Times: The demo-
cratic idea is a tariff for the benefit Of
England; the republican idea is tariff
for the benefit of America.