The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1884-01-24
WAIT.

- SA-CAb oAdAC q AO1SSA S1AilO "
me, from which l quote as follows
. Il have received an offer of mar
riage from Mr.. H, and have
about decided to accept it. Il
! would be useless to say that l love
him, but he is a thoroughly good
man, and one whom | sincerely re
. spect; and 1 believe he really loves
me. The truth is, FRI tired OF
. teaching school; tired of being at
the mercy of parents and commit
tee, and | want q home. Besides,
you know was never very strong,
and my work is wearing me out.
Don't think me more. mercenary
than I am, for he has little besides
his salary"
Looking over this letter, so self
ish, so full of 'I," yet withal so pa
thetic, l am moved to making the
answer public, in the hope of
reaching other women IN like straits !;
for, though very unwilling to dis
turb the peace of mind of actual or
prospective husbands, it is undeni-
ably true that the writer Of the
above states the position of many
women, and the reasons for which
they marry. DR.. Cuyler, in a late
Independent, arraigns with intense
earnestness the women who
marry Tor pomp and social position
But there remains a large class who
do not long for luxury, who are con-
tent with plain surroundings, who
are not afraid of single life, but who
are urged into marriage by a dis
taste for their daily work, or the
lack of strength to do it. They are
mostly young women whose shout
ders are not yet fitted to their bur
dens, and who shrink from the long
years of self-support which stretch |
out before them, and their wea-i-
ness and encouragement are re-
solved into the cry, eve are tired !
of taking care of ourselves, and we
want somebody to take care of u.s."
This sounds cowardly, put into
plain words, but they feel cowardly,
and this feeling is largely due to
their lack of proper training or
preparation. A man, naturally
brave, thrust into battle without
weapons, might be excusable for
wanting to run.
Now, my poor, tired, discouraged
sister, before you say eyes" to him,
let US look the matter over a little,
and for the present we put aside the
sentiment of the question, and con
slider it in a plain, matter-of fact
way, counting the tangible profit
and loss. To begin, you are tired
of the monotony of your daily work.
Well, that is easily understood; for
all of US, even the most favored, feel
sometimes that life is a grind and
we long TO step out of our particu-
lar treadmill and demolish it. But
the question arises, should we step
more gaily in a new treadmill? In
that home you sigh tor, there will
be work for you, and Homework
never seemed to me to be whirl of
excitement. On the contrary, my
housekeeping friends sometimes be.
wall, almost with tears, the inexora
bic routine OF house-work, and that
Whether sick or well, sorry or glad
washing, ironing and mending,
sweeping, busting and baking, sue
coed each other with appalling reg
ularity. Clearly you will not gain
in the matter of variety.
What comes next? Tired OF 90
ing ont in all weathers. Why, that
is just the saving of you, bodily
and mentally. How cold you set
tie down to a days work, without o.
taste of the fresh, outdoor air, the,
brisk exercise, the stimulating
sight of other faces? But that is
precisely what most house-keepers
have to do; and there are women il.
graves and insane asylums for lack
of that which you count hardship.
In some parts of the west it is diff
cult. to get house servants, because
the young, strong women are wise
enough to prefer outdoor work to
being shut up with raging cook
ing stove. OF course, a sloppy,
bleak dey is sometimes trial, but
if you dress suitably you can defy
the weather. No sympathy is
needed here.
What is next on the list? Tired
of being at the mercy Of employers.
This is a more serious trouble, for
employers, being mortal, sometimes
make their service a grievous bur
den to the employed 1t may help
little to remember that they have
their trials too, and that fault-fnd-
ing and seeming parsimony often
spring not from ill-will but from the
strong pressure of business compe-
tition. or an uncertain market, and
a morning scolding, apparently
causeless, may be the natural out
come of night of sleepless ankle
ty. And remember that behind the
hypocrital committee are the pa
rents in the double capacity of pa
rents and taxpayers. But if your
position becomes uncomfortable, 90
elsewhere, try something else;
there's work enough in the world,
and if some employers are hard,
there are others whose patience and
forbearance are beyond praise.
But what can you do, if, after ac-
cepting a situation for life, you
find your employer ill-tempered and
exacting? You cannot, as in the
case of a trying scholar, promote
him, or, as an over-zealous com
mittee man, pray that a change'in
politics may take off his official
head; you cannot "give notice"
He's fixture; and angry thoughts
and words will only make the mat
ter worse. Fanny Fern said a great |
many wise things in her whimsical
way, and among others, this: !
''Wives, you need good stock of
love to start with it will be drawn
upon" If the wives who love find |
it necessary to draw upon their re-
serve capital, what will you do who
only respect" the man you marry? |
L - no l.,