National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1884-03-19
COL. GUTRIPPAu.
Ho Relates Certain Experiences from
Which lie Draweth n Moral.

Chicago Inter Ocean,
II hate 10 sec man make q liah outen
himself, sah," resumed the colonel. 'In meet
heap Of tramps on they street every night,
sab, and every one wants money fob a bed,
oh fob something to eat, sab. They otbah
night done met man who asked mo If /
wasn't from Kaintucky.
"'YeB, sah,' says 1.
so am !, sah,' says he: but unfortunately
am in reduced circumstances, sab. fact
l am so cussed, condemned reduced that l
haven't got enough money to get to the stock
yahds, whah my sistah lives.
at can't cost much to 60 to they stock
yahds, sah,' says !.
"'Only 10 cents, sah,' says he, .'and l
would considah that a loan to be repaid to-
morrah, sah.'
Don't you oil want drink, sab, or some
thing to eat, sah,' says l..
"'No, sah,' says he. All I want is 10
cents fob cab fahe, sah.'
81 done happen to think that had
Dcouple Of South Side cab tickets in my
[pocket that Mistah Holmes had given
Sme, togethah with invitation to ride ovah
they cable road, sah and | handed them to
they fellah and told Ahim that they would
take him thah j never saw so disappointed
man, sub. He oil actually cried with rage.
Now, If he all had said that he wanted
drink oh two and good squah meal, sab
he all might have had n dollah just as we'll
as not, sab. You all is q younger man than /
is, sab. Let me give you all little advice:
Nevah take they horseshoe from the doh; oh
in othah wohds sab, nevah ask fob q matt
nee ticket when you all means pass to New
York, sah."
"You can't always know what to expect"
suggested the reporter.
mo. sab. They was niggah in Gutrip-
pah's landing who by strict attention to
business and rigid economy, sab, in o couple
Of yeahs had saved they handsome sum OF ten
dollahs sab, so he all stahtod to Louisville to
take in they town. He all went afoot sab,
and lived on roots, because he all wanted to
spend they whole amount in they city, sab.
When he all got than he walked along they
street, sab. and it seemed rs if everybody
knew he was country niggah, sab. They
othah niggahs would look at him kind Of
superiOrScillus, sab. The little boys
yaller dawg follahed him fob about
a block, sab, swapping at his heels. But
they boy kept on, sab, He all was q gritty
fellah, and bound to take in they town, sab.
When he como to they business part OF town,
sab, he all opened he alls eyes in wondah.
They first show window he struck was
pawnprokers, sab, whah they was lot of
truck that took he alls eyes. and among they
things, sab, was banjo and lot of revol-
vahs. He all tried to get past, but couldn't,
sab, so he all went in and found the price of
the banjo was fohteen dollars, and a good self
cockah revolvah was $40, sab, so he all spent
his fortune fob they reyolveh and stahted fob
home, sah When he all got to the landing
he all got they crowd togethah back of they
hoss-renting stoh to display they revolvah,
sab. They pawnbrokah had loaded it fob
him, but neglected to show him how to shoot
1t off, sab. lie all put he alls fingah in the
triggah, sab, and pulled. Bang She went,
like young cannon, sab. But he all kept
ing around promiscous like, sab, while
they crowd of niggahs scattahed and
run fob deah life, yelping like they devil
was aftah them, sab, and they gun banging,
with they niggah pulling away at they trig-
gsh, as white as n tolable black one can get,
till thoy loads was all out, sab, and they fusil-
ade ceased.
"When they boy found she wouldn't shoot
any mob, he all dropped they revolvah, sab,
and run fob about quahtah a mile. Then
he all stopped, sab, and reflected that he all
had a cehtain amount of capital tied up in
they revolvah, sab, that might be released to
good advantage, sab. So he all came back,
took long piece of Irvine outen his pocket,
sab, tied IL to the revolvah, sab, and dragged
her down they road to they grocery. Heah
all he explained the circumstances to they
crowd, sab, and they all laughed like light
ming. Finally one fellah otIahed to twade a
dawg and a fiddle fob they revolvah, sah,
and the niggah agreed TO they trade. Aftsh he
all had they dawg with a rope around they
neck, sab, they dawg became restless and bit
they niggah, sir, who retaliated by hitting
they dawg with they fiddle, sab, killing they
formah and spelling they latter, sab, so that
all the nggah had to show fob two yeahs of
hahd labah and economy was confused
wound of they lower petition Of they back,
sah
"All of which leads me to obsehve," said
the colonel, with II circular motion of his
finger to the barkeeper that to be truly vir-
tuous we all must be eccentric"