The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-07-08
A DELEGATES DREAM.
Too Much Circus-Convention.-
Great National Character
istics as Exhibited at
Chicago During the
week.

In this land of the free and the home
of the political liar. l was elected a
delegate from Montana to the Chicago
convention, and on my way there |
took run over to my old home in
Iowa. Sells Brothers big show was
there and of course took it in, and
when I went to bed the continued
thinking of the great menagerie and
of the convention sort of turned my
brain over and built up the dream
of which / speak. / dreamed that |
entered the great menagerie, and 10!
the animals had escaped from their
cages, and we've holding presidential
convention. The idea of the animal
kingdom sending delegates to a con-
vention TO elect a president! But of
such was the baseless fabric of my
dream. 1 dreamed that the giant
elephant, Emperor, occupied the
chair, rugged out in an evening dress
which he had taken from his trunk.
The various committees were report
ing as / got in, and it was soon
evident to me that an imaginary
lumber yard was being overhauled,
supplying planks for the platform. The
convention seemed to be run on the
cooperative plan, as | soon discover
ed that the stalwarts were led by the
big elephant, the balf-breed by the
coyote, the democrats by the lion and
the republicans by the tiger. The
greenbackers were led by the parrot !;
the workingmen by the beaver; the
monopolists, as always, had the
greedy side of it, and were led by the
bull and bear, and the colored
element by the coon. Bruin had
just been making speech as | enter
ed, and concluded by saying:
This is the first general convention
the first gathering, grand gathering
] will say, of all species of animals
since the days of Noah, L
Here he had to bear an Interrupt
ton from the parrot, who shouted !:
L Noah thing or two about it myself, /
-(Cries of cheese it cheese it y No
cheese for me without crackers, cried
the parrot. Il
But he was interrupted by the
stork who cried Mr.. President, /
would like to say few words regard.
my silver bill.
Silver bill, replied the chair, may
do for storks but they will not stand
nosing from this body.
/, said the coon, would like to intro.
duee a measure regarding the fowl
Never you mind the fowl, exclaim.
ed the chicken hawk. I'm on tc
your game.
This out break caused the laughing
hyena to shed tears. My friends, said
he, that is grave assertion. [ pause
Yes, yes, corrected the chair, but
you keep your paws out of it.
Mr.. Speaker, cried the goat,
would like to say little word for q
scent here
Wo there, shouted the horned
horses, what's the matter with draw
ing the line at two bits
Order being finally restored, and
the tiger having obtained the.foor he
held the attention of the vast con
course of Enthusiastically more
than ever before assembled-for fully
an hour while in glowing terms and
with wonderful force and power
he advocated the framing Of
some law, he cared not what, for the
suppression of gambling. Concluding
with brilliant peroration, he said
[ appeal to you, for the sake of justice
of fairness, and of him
mean brutality and / must say fol
personal reasons and On behalf of my
constituency, for | can assure you
that we have to stand the brunt o.
the whole matter. No reasoning
voter, whether be wears bulls heaC
or an apes will attempt to deny tina
all classes who gamble make it poin
to buck the tiger.
Before, however, any action could
be taken upon it, the lion jumped Il
his feet and said: Mr.. Speaker, 4
move the previous question, and re
gard it as the main one.
At this juncture the elephant gain
ed the floor and exclaimed trus
that the lions motion will not prevail
:. at least until this body has takel
some action upon the important cues
ton of leasing the public lands b.
the great trunk lines (cries of, Cues
ton, question, from the African guar
ter During the short time lost b,
this crossfre, the three-horned, blacl
rhinoceros gained the floor and erect
ing his snout, broke out as follows
Mr.. President, would like to hav
the civil rights bill. The coal blacl