davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
CHIT.CHAT WITH OUR CORRESPON.
DENTS.
Sirt 1t! SIT It!

The SITTER is enlarging its field ev-
cry week and it becomes necessary to
warn its correspondents that they must
sJt it. Give us the pure gold, sharp
and to the point. Put in a little git up
and git" then will all our readers rise
up and bless you,and John will be hap
py and pray that you may all marry
young and have lots of little Sifters to
help your old age.
Stick in pin here. The SITTER
does not retail village or neighborhoo d
scandals. 1t wages war upon no one
save only the misdoer in Office, who is
responsible to the people for his acts
Tn 2se it proposes to scalp at every OPP
portunity without regard to party.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
"SNIVEL" SERVICE,

Lord Roscoe Conkling is the father,
we believe, not of the so-called civil
service reform, but of the better name
placed at the head of this article and
however one may condemn many of
his actions, this, if nothing else, Gre
ates for him a respect born of true
greatness. We always feel like lifting
our hat to Roscoe whenever civil SER
vice reform is mentioned.
No doubt some of the promoters of
this scheme to "catch gudgeons" are
honest, very honest, but then their
very names are suggestive of the ante
diluvian period, and one instinctivelv
thinks of an oyster knife with which
to scrape off the barnacles.
With the great mass of politicians of
either party, whoever mention it. it is
the veriest SWIVEL. Swivel service,
that's it to T. A few weeks since it
was given out that two senators re-
fused to go into reorganization of
the Senate on the ground that the par
ty was pledged to civil service reform
and 1t would not look well for them to
vote out good officers of the Senate
simply because they were democrats,
Whereupon the party papers that fol-
low the lead of some of these men--to
make them respectable, it may be sup
posed-threw up their hats and shouted
good! We are the Simon pure civil
service reformers! All, but in a few
days the Senate caucus meets and we
lind a large majority in favor of turn
ing the rascals out" and putting in our
men who are always honest if they
couldn't bear the "snivel" test of lit
erary weights and measures.
What do these same newspapers saw
now? 0, they are like the boy on a
certain occasion, and in about the same
predicament, they have nothing to say.
No blame is to be attached to these
men for voting their friends in. The
man is to be honored who favors his
friends instead of foolishly trying to
ccnciliate his enemies, or gain favor
with the fosiliferous civil service re-
formers. He is only to blame when he
becomes a "snivep- er. Stand IN to
the rack and say you believe in the So
called Jacksonian doctrine-'tis not. it
is as old as creation, the God of Heaven
has planted it in the breasts of every
living creature-that to the 'victors
belong the spoils."
Would the Republican party elect a
president whom they knew would fill
the offices with Democrats? No
Would the Democratic party vote for
the man who designed ladling out the
spoils to the Republicans No. o,
you would stand them up in row and
fire literary bullets at them? Put
them under the school marin test. Ell |?
Bosh. No one doubts but that the
civil service needs reforming, and no
one believes that politicians will ever
do it. This is trade they never
learned, and il is hard to learn an old
dog new tricks,
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
FUNNY THINGS WE READ.
HUMOROUS STORIES TOLD ny THE
WITS OF IKE PRES.

An Inyaiid-what She Said About
Him-EHe Didn't See Them-lhe
uai Boy-A Fathers Curse.
BARON BOLD.
hold it truth, with him who sings
To one clear harp in divers tones,
That mon may rise ON stepping stones
OF their dead selves to higher things.
Alfred TeanySon.
OF course YOU did, long years ago,
When you were scarcely more than boy,
AMI revealed in your spring-time joy,
But knew not aught of wintry Woe
Now, when your head is bare and bald,
And vanished the poetic fire,
Which once lcaped blazing from your Tyre,
A Baron bold you would be called.
--Neic iOr. Journal
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

ONE OF the grounds on which the Mormons
claim immunity from interference with thor
affairs is that they simply live according to
their religion, and that any action on the part
of the United States government to correct
their abominable practices would be religious
persecution. A slier or falser reason than
his could not be thought of. The Utah polyga-
mists do not live according to their alleged
revelation of new religion, but in direct op-
position to it. The Book of Mormon, which
is the original scripture of this sect in this coun
try directly forbids polygamy. 1t is the book
copyrighted by Joseph Smith, as the author
AID proprietor, on June II, 1929, but set forth
by him, to his disciples, IS revelation of d.
vine writings. 1t was printed at Palmyra,
New York, by E. B. Grandin, in 1880, and the
copy which lies before us was given by its
original owner to the present one in 1912. 1t
is one of the original copies, and perhaps the
only one now in existence, or at least not in the
hands of the Mormons. The poygamists have
bought up as many as possible of these original
copies of Smiths Book Of Mormon, and de-
stroyed them.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
AN INVALID,

"Your daughter has a touch of ma
laria," said a physician to New York
lady. 81 will cali again in the morning."
The mother then went to her daugh-
ter's room with look of great anxiety
on her face, and said:
"My dear, the doctor says veu have
malaria. What is it2 Is it dangerousF
"Not very, mamma, and oh, it is so
aristocraticl | will wear my blue silk
wrapper, and we must get some cut-glass
bottles for the medicines, and if any of
the Snuflles girls call have them brought
to my room. 1t will take them down q
peg or two, can tell you"
And the sick woman looked the very
picture of happiness and content. - Call.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
The High Places.

Says tie Philadelphia Star: At the
present time the steeple of the cathedral
at Cologne is the tallest in the world,
being j11 feet in height. The Washing
ton monument, at Washington, when
completed, will overtop it by forty four
feet, and William Penn, when placed on
the ton of the eupola of the public build
ines of this city. will be able to lay his
patriarchal hand patronizingly upon the
top of the shaft that is intended to COM
memorate the virtues of the father of his
country.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
HE DIDN'T SEE THEM.

He was little green, though he pre-
tended to know all about the music she
was playing.
She was at the piano knocking Heavens
delights out of a march with some long
lame and she evidently thought she was
paralyzing both him and the instrument.
All of sudden there was pause.
''What's the matter?" said he.
"Why, | dropped two notes"
"Did you," said he, getting up and
looking carefully around the stool and
I'm er the piano. 81 didn't see you.
Who were they from-but of course you
wouldn't tell me, you know.-EcansoiNe
Argus.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
BUSINESS TALK.

The SITTER will shortly begin
the publication of a series OF let
tiers or articles on the numbering in
terests of the upper West River valley
and its contiguous territory, giving its
extent, its future prospects, its draw
back, if any, how far its forces are ex-
hausted and its commercial value and
influence upon the general prosperity,
etc. Information and data are solicit
ed and will be thankfully received by
Oscar A. Tanner, Esq, at Jamaica, or
by the editor.
From this time until the opening of
spring Winchester will sell his entire
stock of Stoves at cost.
Read ii. p. Chase's new advertise
ment.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT HIM.

"What does your sister say about me!"
asked a young man of small brother of
the maiden he thought he loved. "Oh,
lotsm sententiously exclaimed the pre-
cocious boy. "Well, tell me-, said the
youth in a coaxing voice. "She says
you've got lots of money" "Well, what
else?" II don't like to tell" ooh,
come; tell me and I'll give you some
candy" "Well, she says that if she
ever married you she'd loan you to farmer
Cornstalk for scarecrow." 'Is that
all?' he sarcasticallv inquired. ooh, no.
She said if it wasn't for your ears the
top part of your head would be an island,
and that if your nose was little longer
you could stir your coffee with it, and
if" But the young man had closed the
front door after him and was scooting
down the street on dog trot.-NeW Or
leans PicayuRe.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

ing himself up proudly, he broke his left
suspender.
"You speak truly" replied the girl
can explanation of my action is due
you, Know, then, that | am victim oil
heredity."
"Of whatln asks Vivian.
"of heredity," repeats the girl,
'In what respects" he demands, his
voice hoarse with agony.
81 have, says the girl, steadying her.
self against the piano, 'inherited my
fathers snore, n-Chicago Tribune.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04
STATE NOTES.-THROUGH THE
"SiFTER'S" SIEVE.

Lyndonvil'e is to have a new bank.
The Londonderry SITTER is new
and spicy exchange -Sprinafeld Re
porter.
Brattleboro business men are trying
to induce the Carpenter organ COM
pany of Worcester, Mass, to remove
their business to the former place.
Mrs. Emma Hopkins, of Spring
Lake, Mich, claims to own Ethan
Aliens sword, and she is anxious to
sell it to the State of Vermont for
$1,000.
A colt worth s175 owned by Frank
Smith, of Pawlet, while loose in the
stable Monday night, jumped against
sharp post and was killed instantly.
Miss B. A. Collins has resigned as
principal Of the grammar department
in the graded school, Bennington. She
has filled the position over five years.
Wednesday night, while Tice Niles
and family, of Pownal, were away
from home, his house and it's contents
were burned. The house was insured
for $500, and the furniture for $3.50
The fire is supposed to have been in
cendiary, as the family had been away
since morning.
At Island Pond an icicle fell and
struck John Pelchie on the nose,
nearly severing that member from his
face.
John Currier, of st. Johnsbury Cen
ter, tried to commit suicide with NOR
phine, but oVerdid the business and
still lives.
Joel Tucker and wife, of Plymouth,
while on a protracted spree recently,
set fire to their house and the woman
was probably fatally burned.
Robert, an l1-years-old son of John
Manly, of Dorset, was kicked in the
head by horse. crushing in the front
part of his head; little hope is enter
tanned of his recovery.
Excitement in Bennington Society.
A Bennington dispatch to the New
York Sun says: Great excitement was
caused in this village Friday morning
by the report that duel had occurred
Thursday evening between Ralph Gold
smith, leading merchant. and John
Cheeseman, a typo employed in the
Banner office, and that Cheeseman had
been wounded. Several shots were
heard at the time mentioned, and gave
color to the report. Cheeseman has
for some time been counting Miss lilly
Goldsmith, and his attentions were very
distasteful to the girls father, but she
loved Cheeseman, and as she continued
to keep his company Mr.. Goldsmith
forbade him the house, and threatened
to send the daughter away Then it
was said that Cheeseman had been
challenged by Goldsmith. An investi-
CATION of the report shows that five
shots were fired that night, and that it
was put-up job by certain parties in
furthering the over-excited feeling of
Goldsmith against Cheeseman for the
latter's attentions to Miss Goldsmith.
No one was hurt.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

A WESTERN journal suggests that private
citizens may eflectually aid the good work OF
squelching pernicious papers by refusing to buy
anything from news-stands wherein are dis
played for sale any of tho dlsreputable and
offending papers. Such "boycotting," how
ever, would be eifectual in few instances, and
it would not strike at the root of the evil. The
sale of obscene papers and pictures should be
made a legal crime, and the laws should be
enforced. Above all, parents should take pains
to discover what their children are reading,
and to provide enough healthiul and interest.
ing matter to supply their wants. boy who
has plenty of Wayne Reid, and even of Oliver
Optic, if he cannot appreciate Scott and Dick
ems, will not long want the 'ilash" stuff OF the
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

THE opening Of a new limo of steamers be-
tween New York and Mexico marks another
movement of Mexico and the United States
into closer commercial relation, The
tropical products Of Mexico are extremely
valuable to the United States, while the Mexi-
can demand for our manufactures is rapidly in
creasing and may be made hundred fold
greater. We import more than $40, 900, 00D oil
Cuban products annually, and less then SlO,'
O0O, 900 of Mexican, and yet our trade with
Mexico ought greatly to exceed that with
Cuba. The foreign trade Of Mexico was not
sources of the republic and population of
more than 10000 600 ought to soon render
each thousand of trade million.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

MANY Young mon ssy they do not need to
year ilannels-lhat old men only need them.
But they will find that the chlls of few win.
tiers, without something to protect their bodies
from tho radical atmospheric changes will
make them prematurely old. Let them heed
the advice of the wise and experienced presi.
dent of Yale college, and dress with under as
well as outer garments, in manner to meet
the inroads of the trying climate of New Eng
land, and they will most likely retain their
ruddy cheeks and robust health till they be-
como old and worn out.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

would inform the people of Jamai-
ca and vicinity that l have just re-
ceived a fine lot of new Sleighs, which
l shall offer for sale at the Jamaica
House at prices that defy competition.
Come one Come all! 1t will pay you.
Lowest terms can be had by applying
to II. A. Stockwell Jamaica House.
+. L. DAVIS.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

DIR. Isaac Bartlett, of Hope, Me-, who
is 10 years of age and still in good health
and active practice, has lived for years
on bread and milk alone, and says 1t Is
the best thing for everybody.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

TRINITY COLLEGE has received, all told,
nearly S250,000 from Col Northam and his
wife who recently died at Hartford Ct
MERIDES (Ct) voted $50 900 for their new
school-house, in addition 10 $50, 900 already
nlised.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1884-01-04

The total assessed valuation of Dakota
for 1888 is over 500, 600, O00, against SAL
100000 for 1882.
The Easley messenger. (Easley, S.C.) 1883-1891, 1884-03-07

"A few evenings ago Richard Val
entine, a Well-to-do falmer OF North
Hampstead, Long Island. called ut the
house OF a friend. Miss Annie Jack
son. a cousin OF the no. 'ess, remarked
TO Mr.. Valentine that it was leap year,
and that if young lady asked him to
marry her he would have to do it or
buy her new dress. He said that was
light, and she then ''poppcd the q,lcs-
ton" lie thought it was better to
marry first and then buy the dress after
ward, 50 be told her to PIT on her
things and come. They drove to Ros-
lyn, and were married the same even
ing. The bridegroom is man of
wealth, and it is generally conceded
that the young lady acted discrcetily.
The Easley messenger. (Easley, S.C.) 1883-1891, 1884-03-07
LEAP YEAR EPISODE.

Can I forget that winter night .,..*...
In eighteen cighty-four, s$s3 fet''SS
When Nellie, charming little sprite,s;;;,,
Came tapping at the door? 3,%
"Hood-evening, MISS" blushingsaid
For in my heart knew %.3 !. j y
And knowing, hung nay pretty head y =
That Nellie came to Woos ..
She clasped my big red hand, andsfell
Adown upon her knees,
And cried: "You know l love you well,
So be my husband, please - >
And then she swore she'd ever be
A tender wife and true
All, what delight it was to me
That Nellie came to WOO
She'd lace my shoes and darn my hose
And mend my shirts, she said,
And grease my comely Roman nose
Each night on going to bed;
She'd build the fires and fetch the coal,
And split the kindling too
Loves perjuries Overwhelmed her soul
When Nellie came to WOO.
And as I, blushing, gave no check
10 her advances rash,
She twincd her arms about my neck,
And toyed with my mustachc;
And then she pleaded for kiss,
While l. what could do
But coyly yield to that bliss
When Nellie came to WOO?
am engaged, and proudly wear
A gorgeous diamond ring,
And / shall we'd my lover fair
Some time in gentle spring.
face my doom without sigh
And SO, forsooth, would you.
If you but loved as fond as I,
And Nellie came to WOO.
-Chicago Ntws.
The Easley messenger. (Easley, S.C.) 1883-1891, 1884-03-07
Furniture House,
EASLEY, S. c.
COME ONE, COME ALL

a ND furnish your Houses IN c'rgant
IA style for the Summer with 4 nic,
Line Of BelStcHdS, Mattresses, Bu-
rcaus. Tables. Stands, Chairs, Rockers.
&C., &c. Bf&a. A general assortment
nf Landscape "hroEos in 22x3O inch
frames, chord. &C.. all ready for hang
ing on the walls. Also, on hand. Il line
OF cabinet, promenade, panel and card
i've photograph frames. all in artistic
style. Always on land Il full line Of
UNDERWRITERS SUPPLIES.
Caskets and coffins. al sizes aud STYLES
Burial Robes for each sex all qualities
and prices. Ready atall hours to wait
upon customers. COffins trimmed in
any style, and when SO desired, will be
trimmed and shipped to any point on
Railroad free of extra charge.
Thanking YOU for past favors. and
soliciting your further patronage, am
Respectfully yours,
A. Nj. RUNION'
feb 8m
The Easley messenger. (Easley, S.C.) 1883-1891, 1884-03-07

"A s'pcrsttious subscriber, found
= spider in the copy OF his paper, and
wrote to know If it is constltrc,l'a bad
omen. Nothing 81 the kind the spi-
der was merely looking over the col
nmns Of the paper to see what mcr-
chant WAS not advertising, 50 that he
could spin his web aero So the store door
and be free from disturb ance.
The Easley messenger. (Easley, S.C.) 1883-1891, 1884-03-07

Gr@env1ile
MA C.Hg.AsNE WORKS
IN Ia .Ma AND
rN NsS1 OUMDRV.
/. & + J, N: I SiAeDQNALD, prop'r.
and Mannffaeti,reNof all kinds of Ma.
chiner,y ala rfan Castings made
I am agent foEa ahe eJ5l'son Governor.
and can tiliplicate ;S,iNSp also tn.
&: ,:::sS. S.HANCUCKsfNSPlR. .ATOR,
which can tit to any uilcr. The
safest and simplest means Of injecting
water iuto boiler. Information
clccrfully furnished on application. !
have on hand Steam Gauges. Fittings.
Valves and Steam Pipes of all sizes.
My stock is tirst-class amt from tic
est manufactures.
Write for prices
r.. NJ. MACDONALD Dear Sir:
We have one of thn Hancock MSpi
rators, No. l23. furnished hy You, in
use supplying our i0-tIOrSe Power
A'o'i\i NIIt' Nd'Nl, NtlN CtlISNiPI /
equal to. ifnot superior. to any in use.
we cheerfully recomcnd it.
Sh,nnatc, Grady & Nichols.
r. M. MACDONALD, Grcenville, $. G..
-Dc0W Sir: The No. 174 Hancock
lnspirator placed on my 5O-IIorse Pow
er Boiler by yon, proved Il success SO
far in every particular, and as a boiler
feeder, | believe it has no equal. BE-
fore | secured your Inspi'ator Sutftr-
ell from uneasincsS. besides the en-
pensc Of Keeping our steam pump ''in
repairs.' 1t does its work promptly.
Can recommend it to any using "a boil
cr feeder. Respectfully yours
George Pltnam.
r. NJ. MACDoNAI.D, Grecnvillc. G..
-Dcor Sir: The No. 81 Hancock IN
Spil1tor you pnt on my Portable En-
Glle last summer. consider it far
superior TO any pump have ever seen.
In fact could not get along without it
| would advise all owners OF steam ell
Gines to Use them
Respectfully yours
+. +. Alyood.
Dee 213m
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1884-09-18
ALL AROUND THE GLOBE.

The Knights of Malta closed their regular
annual convocation in Philadelphia yester-
day.
John Nelson, in st. Louis, was shot and
instantly killed by Mrs. E. G.. Stewart while
attempting to enter her house during the alb
sence Of her husband.
A child of Michael McCue, of East Sagi-
nav, Mich, drank corrosive sublimate mixed
with gin, thinking it was pop. There is little
chance of her recovery.
The Glendower Iron works, of Danville,
Pa, were sold by the sheriff yesterday. Mrs
Hugh Z. Steele was the purchaser.
The st. Louis 81 San Francisco railroad
yesterday brought suit against the Marine
National bank for the amount of draft on
st. Louis deposited for collection the day be-
fore tbs bank suspended, but not collected
until after the failure OF the bank.
The evictPd and idle miners in Ohio are
committing depredations upon the small
stock farms in their vicinity, and the farm
ers are afraid to take legal measures to put d
stop to it.
James Lee, alias Joe Hart, alias Herman
Goethe, waB arrested in Baltimore on the
charge Of swindling people by presenting
bills of lading for goods "arrived from
Europe" He represented himself as Gus
tom house officer.
The American Carp Culture association
held meeting in Philadelphia yesterday.
The secretary's report showed 500 enrolled
members, representing every state in the
union. 1t was stated that $4,000 persons
had commenced the culture of carp in this
country.
posse of five men attempted to arrest
VIM. Nsary, charged with the murder of two
men in Nelson county, Ky. Neary was
heavily armed and refused to sure nder, and
was shot and instantly killed by the posse.
Judge Donohue, Of the supreme court of
New York. has granted an attachment
against the property Of the Mississippi Valley
Bank Of Vicksburg, in an action brought by
the National Park Bank of New York to re-
cover S43, 1866 claimed due the plaintiff.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1884-09-18
An Od;o,tS Case.

On Monday Mrs. Edith Cole instituted pro-
ceedings against her husband, Israel Cole,
in the district court, to answer a decree of
absolute divorce. The complaint alleges
cruel and inhuman treatment as the grounds
for the action. If the allegations sworn to by
Mrs. Cole are true, her affinity is a brute.
He is charged with clubbing and maltreat-
ing her until welded life became an unen-
durable burden.
Now the hubby, who is quite an ordinary
parsonage, retaliates. Yesterday at his in
stance the wife whom he had taken solemn
vow TO love and protect, was arrested and
dragged before the police court upon the
charge of adultery. The complaint alleges
that the defendant, Edith Cole, had formed
an unlawful lisison with one Z. Clark, with
whom she was criminslly intimate
on the 14th of July last. To the reporter the
husband related lengthy tale, replete with
sensation aud wickedness, stating that he
had proof positive of the sinful department
OF his wife.
The woman is girlish in appearance, and
gives her age as twenty-one, although the
casual observer would not place it over six
teen years. She was plainly, even poorly,
eau, auQ HSE appc4E1HGG yes LSE NoNdENS
confirming her statements. She says her
husband compelled her to take in washing
TO help support him, and that be had var
iously argued with her in his endeavor 10
prevail upon her to establish wicked relations
with men for the purpose of gain, and when
she refused him, he cruelty best her.
Mrs. Cole was arraigned in the municipal
court Yesterday afternoon and her examina-
ton was continued, st the request of her
counsel, Mr.. Goss, until Friday, in 500. In
default OF the bail the defendant was taken
to the county isil last night, but she viii find
sureties to-day.