St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1884-12-15
sPRIGHTLY READING.

ALC just ~ uaU4 llaL inc
country contains over twelve thousand medi-
cal students. II was indeed time for a change
OF administration Lowell Citizen.
An old maid in Nashville keeps a parrot
which swears, and monkey which chews
tobacco. She says, between the two. she
doesn't miss husband so very much
Merchant Traveller.
Vermont storekeeper set a spring gun
in his store for twenty-five years without
hagging anything until the other Right, when
the old musket fell down and shot him
through both legs.-Burlington Free Press.
Sixty Harvard freshmen have dropped
their Latin, eighty their Greek and one hun
dred their mathematics. None Of them have
dropped their base ball or their boating,
however, and college culture is still safe
Lowell Courier.
The horses ridden BY the James boys are
in New York and great many other places
at the present time, connected with the
show. This is accounted for by the fast that
the James boys rode great many horses that
did not belong 10 them,
Pedestrian (who has lost his wayl-Why.
don't you have guide boards round here, so
that stranger can tell where be is goingl
Now in the city we have plenty Of guide
boards, one on every corner. Farmer-Why,
didn't you bring few along with you, then
Harvard Lsmpoon.
She-So Mr. bricks Is elected after all.
He-What Dricksi She-Why, Mr.. Henry
bricks, Of Indiana. He-oh, you mean, Mr..
Hendricks, don't youi She-Of course; but
don't think 1t is polite 10 call such a nice
old gentleman Hen.-NeW York Journal
Miss Prettypert-Why don't you come over
with your sisters to our place sometimes,
Johnniei Johnnie (rising ten)-Well, It's
like this, y'know, Miss Prettypert: Where
there's ripping nice girl, like you, IL came
often people might think had intentions
and Pm not a marrying man London
Fan.
"These iremen must be frivolous set, ~
said Mrs. Spilkins, who was reading paper
''Why sol'' 81 read In the paper that after
the fire was under control the fremen played
all night on the ruins. Why didn't they 20
home and go to bed, like sensible men, in
stead Of romping about like childrenl''-
Texas siftings.
He-What do you say to Christmas for our
wedding days She-I say no, sir; you must
be simple. Do you think 1 want to be cheat
ed out Of one set Of presenisi-Progress.
Miss Roseleaf (who is trying to force con-
versation) what do you suppose, Mr.. Van
Noodle, makes our hostess reception so in
Variably stupidl Mr.. Van Noodle-Aw, veal
ly, haven't ghost Of an ideaw. Miss R.
Aud all the other gentlemen are lust like
you. Yes; that must be the reason.-Har-
ward Lampoon.
1t was a graduate OF the Yale foot ball de-
partment who translated De Mortlds mi mis-
bOssHHs-''To the dead there are nothing but
bones. life.
The average size Of the American family
is 5.04. The decimal probably represents
the dude, but the statisticians have got II "a
Their large.-Boston Transcript.
''How does the new girl strike your, asked
q citizen Of Detroit at dinner lately. ''She
hasn't struck me yet" answered his wife
meekly. "But she has done most everything
else. "-Iudependent.
A mendicsnt approached a Westchester
man on the cars the other day and said
"Dear sir, have lost my leg" to which the
Westchester man replied, as he hurried away
''My dear friend ] have not seen anything
Of it. ''-Westchester Local News.
'Tis sweet 10 bet,
But, oh, bow bitter
To bet aud lose-
Well, We should twitterl
Boston Globe.
He-I saw Miss Dash to-day. She is a
very charming young lady She-Oh, yes,
very charming aud very young. You ninny
she's Just my age. He-The deuce she Is
But she doesn't look it.-Boston Transcript.