Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1884-07-23
plainin that ever sence.

plainin that ever sence.
He howled for spcshy when we
ought TO hev good paper mummy, and
howled for rag mummy when we ought
to hev nothin but speshy or its equiva.
lent, and he's bin eXplainin that ever
sence.
In breef, the fust thing Dime.
kratic speeker alluz does when he
commences his speech is to eXplane,
and that okkepies him till he closes,
MY trends, ther don't happen to be
a single thing That Dimocrisy hez at
tempted to do that he hezn't bin CON-
PEELED 10 explane. He heZ managed,
with skill wicb is trooly wonderful, to
git ON the wrong side nv every question
that hez bin afore the Amerikinpeople
ever sence he wuz born. Ell ther's a
sin wich he hezn't taken to his bnzum
and fur wich he's not now explainin,
| don't happen 10 remember it..
Eff theirs IA heresy he heznt sided
in with, an error wieh he hrzn't en-
braced, a wrong wich he hezn't cham.
pioned, and a piece of damned
oolishnessl wich he heZn't indorsed,
hev forgotten it,
"Other parties sometimes make mis-
takes--thc DImocrisy hez week.-mrs.
for crime IL perpetooally wants to
commit murder without any reason
for IT, 1t is the one party that never
wuz rite. One wood suppose it mite
occasionally blunder into doin the
proper thing, but it doesn't. 1t hez
the whisky inilooence at its back, and
il wood court Mormonism eff Utah he'd
a Electoral vote. Ther amt any sin
wicb it doesn't take to with relish,
none wich its adherence won't stumick.
The Dimekratic siumick is worse nor
an ostrich's; the ostrich kin digest
simple stones = Dimocrisy wakes
strong on actooal pizen. 1t can't feed
on grass, and sweet corn wood turn its
stumick. 1t wants still Stops with
| stricknin into it.
"The Dimekratic party Is like q
retreetin army--it alluZ hez TO look
out for its reer. It's biggest enemy is
its past. Its continooally whitewashin
its past 1t hez to spend its entire
time explainin how it hczn't bin reely
to blame fur bein damned fool.
Its"
1t wuz high time for this sort of
talk to stop, fur the> middle he'd RELY
got the attenshun Nv the people. Tier
wuZnt no yoose NV movin an adjern-
meni, and the people must be STAN.
pcded somehow. Heroic treatment
wuz necessary. Calmly ! rose, and,
iuterruptin the speeker, remarkt to the
awjencc: 4a
Gentlemen, | hev recently he'd a
legacy left me, and rekest yoo all TO
| accompany me 10 Bascom's where /
hev three bottles drawed from a fresh
bari, witch you are wclcom to. want
700 to jine me in drink" s.seff
| The elfeck wuz electrickle. Their
wuz wild charge fur the door, fur
three bottles wood skasely go round in
sech crowd, and each wuz deter
mined to be fust lssaker Gayitt
piled over the heds NV the crowd
and went out NV the door in jiffy,
with Deekin Pogram hangin to his
coat tails. The segashus old man wuz
confiscatin a porshm NV the strength
NV the younger man, that he might
! not be eternally too late.
l he'd TO pawn Waterbury watch
wich | he'd borrered NV n traveln man
fur a Louisville whiskey house, to cit
the bottles, fur Baseom is obdoorit.
But l succeeded in breakin up the
meetin. The Appossle Paul coodent
hold Il Cross Roads awjence agin II
invitashun TO take suthin.
hev hopes that this sacrifice will be
remembered by the next Administra
shen, eff we elect a Dimecratic Presi-
dent. 1t is no small matter for me to
put out three bottles NV whiskey fur
others when so need en- myself. But
sacrifices must be made fur the cause.
PETROLEUM V. NAsBy (Worried).