St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1884-08-28
The Donation Party.
ALL THE OLD THINGS on THEIR WA
TO THE PARSONAGE.

There was n sound of revelry by
night.
The Pickering rays of the street
lamps fell upon the joyful ones as they
gathered themselves unto the feast, for
10, they reasoned one with another,
"Hath not the preacher said, There Is
nothing better for a man than that he
should eat and drink, and that lie
should make his soul enjoy good i'll his
labor?" So they got themselves up
unto the house of feasting and bore
their countenances merrily. And it
was so that the Painted Pine Pail call
ed aloud unto the Cheap Hearth Broom
and said:
$50, here, thou fair one with the
broom-corn bang, whittier goest thou9"
And the Cheap Hearth Broom an
swered and said:
"ThOu knOwest."
Therefore said the Painted Pine
Pail
"You bet Your blue handle"
And then came unto them the Tin
Dipper and the Jar of the Tomato
Preserves and the Peck of Beans.
And they cried unto them, saying:
Garry little, for we also i1nney
your way"
And they greatly were rejoice and
went their way, and they sam and
lifted up the voice and shouted with
an exceeding great shout, for their
hearts were light as payroll.
And there met them in the way the
Hideous Dressing Gown and the dozen
Tin Spoons and the Old Slippers and
the square of Oil Cloth and the Three
Old Books and the Kitchen Chair and
the Yard of Flannel and the Cotton
Tidy and the Bag of Crackers and the
Awful Pen Wiper and the Button
Hook and the Bar of Soap and all the
Things. And when they saw them
they raised Il mighty shout, insomuch
that the watchmen of the city were
awaked, and one said to another:
''Lol noise let us hasten away,
lest we he called in"
For the watchmen of the city visit
not what the racket was, and they
were afraid, which of verify was
their normal condition.
And the Painted Pine Pail called I'M
to the others and said
Tourney with our band, FIR we also
90 upon the errand. Moreover, we
likewise are going to the donation par
ty."
And they joined the band.
And the Kitchen Chair said: "Of Il
surety there will he much good-cheer,
for the matter is not Il surprise, but
the birds of the air carried the matter
to the parsonage, and the parsons
wife hath boiled and baked and brew
ed all day that there might be an album
dance of provisions and cakes of fine
meal and of barley and oil and wine,
and ice cream and grapes, and White
Mountain cake and Lady Jane Wash
ingtOn pie and all that is good and eX-
pensive for after this manner doth al
ways the parsons wife do when she
heareth of Il donation party"
at will be the swell feed of all swell
feeds" said the Old Slipper. And he
was right.
at will be the boss lay out" said al
so the other Old Slipper. And he like
wise was right. They were both right.
And they began to make merry.
And when they were come unto the
parsonage they made rs though they
would enter in ut the gates, but the
gates were locked, Us with IL skein of
telegraph wire. Now the same was
barbed.
And there came to the doors of the
parsonage an holely Old Rag Carpet,
and he rolled himself up and leaned
against the door jamb. Now he was
old and stricken in years. Oft had he
been beaten with rods, forty stripes
plus il thousand and ten, and many
times had he been put down, but as oft
he got up and busted the next spring.
Neither was his general force abated.
Moreover he carried IL stair-rod in his
hand and spoke as one who meant
business. And he said:
"Slidr! Stay not upon the order of
your going, but scatter. Vamose !!
Climb out of this. Verify, was heat
en- but one day ago, and am to be
pasted down tonight, if peradven-
ture, may hold on tn the boards until
next spring. It's bad enough that il
salary of $500 year compels me to
bc tackled down with mucilage; may
the beasts of the field rant over me if |
lie down to have this bowling mob
shuttle over me and grind cake and
bread crumbs into my long suffering
pores. Stampede, or, by the doom of
Jericho, I'll pass around the hat !"
And presently they began to fade
down the dusky highway. And the
Things sat down by the roadside and
east dust upon their heads. And the
Odd Slipper said:
at seems that we are left
And he was right. And the other
Odd Slipper said:
81 should say left. Verify, we are
distanced."
And he also was right. They We're
all left.