Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1884-03-13
THE WICKED FLEA.
His Appearance on the Theatrical
Boards.
Baltimore Sun.


A recent discovery in connection with
theatres IN this city is most laughable. and
will result in much fun to the audiences
in the future unless some actian is taken
at once on the part of managers. 1t seems
that many of the best theatres of the city
have become infested with fleas 1t is be-
heved the tieas have been brought to the
theatres on the pet dogs of actresses and
by the dogs used in plays, and they have
multiplied and replenished in the places
of amusement until they are formidable
army. 1t is said that when a theatre has
not had performance for several days the
! f1eas become hungry, and when the next
company arrives upon the stage the t1eas
take possession of the members too quick
Some aver that the fleas are divided off
into squads, each squad with leader, and
each squad is assigned to one particular
actor or actress, as the case may be. Fleas
are no FOOLS and it would not be strange
| If they had choice as to which member
of company should be assigned to them
Of course it is impossible that the boss
tieas shake dice to decide which shall have
first choice for his squad, and yet it may
be that the fleas know nothing of dice,
and 60 upon the principle of first come
| first served. While the flea is not human,
| we must give the insect credit for knowing
| the difference between the taste of young
| and beautiful actress and an old man OF
woman. The flea is no fool, whatever else
may be said of him, and any person with
any heart at all will feel for the young and
| tender actress whose part compels her to
60 upon the stage of fea-infected theatre,
with a low-necked dress, bare arms, or
Stockings that are perforated by fashion ON
the instep, OF which have not attained
| their growth as to height Such a person
has got much beside her part to attend to,
and her mind must be constantly occupied
in devising means to mash 1eas and give
it away to the audience.
An actress can, if she feels flea graz
ing around, suddenly place her hand on
her heart, and while the audience is look
ing at the expression of pain on her face,
she can let one or two fingers wander down
| where the flee is and paralyze him, and
the audience will think that it is gesture
that is in the play. But there are places
on every person where flea might walk
arm-in-arm with another flea, slipping the
life-bloOd and becoming intoxicated, where
no gesture laid down in a play would fit.
Suppose Mary Anderson, while trying to
haul Romeo up to the balcony so she can
see if he has been chewing cloves, feels
flea crawling down her back. She can
clasp her hands behind her back, and,
while saying, Wherefore art thou, Rom
60" she can everlastingly dig her nails into
the opening in the corset and kill the flea,
and the audience would be none the wiser,
while if she backed up against the railing
and scratched her back on scene, it would
be noticed and commented on, to her dis
credit as an artist, and, besides, she might
push down the scenery. Again. if a flea
should be exploring the vicinity of her
waist, while it would not be admissible for
her to create a gesture that would fit the
case, she could by the poetic license that is
granted ali great geniuses, lean against the
railing, on the point where the flea was,
and while giving taffy to Romeo, she would
make the flea think he had got into the
wrong pew. And yet in that scene ifa few
teas should get among her stockings, as is
almost certain to be the case Mary would
not have any excuse by any act or gesture
in the play, to pay any attention to the flea
and she would have to 60 on with the play
and die game.
In opera it is different. The costumes
are such that the hunting of fees is mere
opera of La Sumnambula," where the
sleep-walker is attired with candle and a
garment that has always been highly
recommended as the proper costume for
the pursuit of fieas.
1t supposed that actors are imperviOus
to the infuenc of fieas, but such is not the
case. Booth, Barrett, Jefferson and Nc
CullOugh are nervous as women, and We
may expect any evening to see Booth as
Hamlet drop his sword and roll down his
black tights, while the ghost is telling the
old story, and catch flea and crush it be-
tween his two thumb-nails, pull up his
stocking, and tell the ghost that he will
make it red hot for his mother and the
uncle who poured melted sealing-wax in
the ghosts ear. In the play of Francesca
da Rimini," when Lawrence Barrett starts
home from the army to kill his brother
and his wife for being too numerous, and
he is all excitement, it would look strange
to see him sit down on stump and 90 to
catching fleas before an audience, and yet
this is what the stage is coming to If fieas
and dogs are now quarantined. 1t would
look queer to see Jefferson, when he rises
up on the stage after twenty years. sleep,
90 to hunting round his decayed and mil
dewed leggngs for f1eas, and to see Nc
Cullough as OthellO stop on the way to
murder DesdemOna and search for f1eas.
This would be going from the sublime to
the ridiculous and then Sun mentions
these possibilities that managers may see
what is liable to happen unless they cause
insect powder to be freely used ON the
stage and cause all dogs brought by ac-
tresses to bring certificate from an M.
d. that they are free from fieas 1t takes
a manager of nerve to stand up before an
actress who has gall enough to carry
dog, or one who has married a husband for
the purpose of carrying her dog, and COM
plain that the dog or her husband is full
Of fieas and must be quarantined-but it
has got to be done. Let the fleas and dogs
go.