Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1884-08-29
The II. O. G..

The American people contribute tens
of millions of dollars to charity and the
heather every year, and do 1t freely.
They build half a dozen new orphan
asylums yearly; they endow new pro-
fcssorships. contribute to every branch
OF education, and fling money about as
if it didn't cost anything. We feed
tra,nps. encourage frauds, buy hum
bugs, bet on all events. and have no
Thought of the Poor house. In our
street cars we give up our seats to the
ladies; on our streets the MAJ in rags
has the same rights as the man in
b%roadcloth.
1T is only when the American goes
out for a little excursion that he forgets
himself and becomes an II. @. G. It's
funny how quick the change occurs.
On the wharf he will toss q quarter to
a bcggar without question. On the boat
he will seltishly occupy two chairs and
let a tired woman stand up. The best
chairs on the ferry and excursion boats
are invariably taken and held by men.
If six or eight of them could by any
possibility get all the breeze and sun
shine and scenery, they would gobble
them to the exclusion of the otherthree
hundred people. The male II. O. G..
may be surrounded by half a dozen la
dies, but that does not prevent him
from putting away at a cigar or pipe.
He wouldn't smoke in the presence of
"a lady calling on his wife at home. but
he is out for q days recreation and his
selfish feelings are uppermost.
Yea, the II. O. G. is around!
60 mn ia tho fIotc Gonna oEt,r,non
land see him rush for the hotel supper
table. There is roomfo 25O, and plcn-
ffy to eat. but ii there were only twenty
five passengers on the boat the II. ..
g. would leap to the wharf before the
plank was out, strike q gallop for the
ldining-room, and sellishly expect to be
waited upon before anyone else was
seated. Go down to Put-in-Bay and
lsce how the IL. O. G. wears his brislles
under a broad-cloth coat. He has paid
the same fare as the other passengers.
but he wants twice as much for his
money. Go Oh on IN excursion train,
and the H. O. q. wo Id, If the thing
Were possible, keep two whole seats for
his body and legs and let the aisles lie
crowded with women and children.
On the boat going up the Iver the
other day was 4 man whose Kindness
OF heart was never appealed to in vain.
Also, a woman whose eyes are always
full of tears over the sulierings of hui
mainly. Both We're away from home.
The bristles began to start. He
llightcd a cigar and let the
smoke blow in her face. She
raised an umbrella and shut off his
vlew OF the shore. He raised his and
shut off the view of q dozen people.
Then everybody became an II. o. &.
umbrellas went up, cigars were lighted,
women encouraged their children to
lsquall; and everybody was determined
to keep everybody else from1ahing any
comfort.
: Why are we thus?
I. When we almire q man WIN don't
we pay HIM to remain strictly al home,
Instead Of taking a trip some day to
show his bristies to the public? When
we know q lovely women, why not
'bHibe her to keep away from excursions
'aEu retain our reverence: indeed. if
you i!aEn a pastor whom you regard as
the kin;:est and best man on earth.
ID c him to stay home. Get him IN
it!'t. h C. of a crowd on Il steamboat or
'2;o I'd he dinncr-cloth on an island,
a; ~ chances are that something
~ : happen to mar the picture.
o N, II. 0. e.! Take three chairs
Old up your umbrella smoke Your
Aolt ~Hipe-spit all over the floor eat
tn most see the most-talk the loud
est-oot oot .'-DctroM Eec Press.