davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16
YORK, 1884.

| About sixty million copies OF The Sun have
gone out of Que establishment during the pact
| twelve mon tbs.
| III you were to paste end TO end all the col.
uons OF all The Suns printed and sold last year
vou wonld get continuous strip o. In terestipg
!, Information, common sense wisdom, sound
! doctrine, and sane wit long enough TO reach
| from Printing House square to the top Of Mount
! Copernicus n the moon, then back TO Printing
| House square, and then thee quarters OF the
| way back TO the moon again.
| But The Sun is written for the inhabitants
OF the earth the same strip Of intelligence
would gird!e the globe TWEEN y. seven or twenty
| eight timer.
| II every buyer of a copy of The Sun during
the past year has spent only one hour over IL.
| and IL his wife or his grandfather has spent
another hour, this newspaper in 1883 has az
forded the human thirteen thousand years
OF steady reading, night and day.
| IL is only by little calculations like these that
you can form any idea OF the circulat ton of the
most popular of American newsp ipers, or OF is
influence on the opinion aud actions OF Ameri.
can men and womeo.
The Sun 10, aud will continue 10 be- a news
paper which tells the truth without tear OF con-
sequences, which gets At the facts no matter
how much the process costs which presents The
news OF all the world without waste of words
aud In the most readable shape, which Ii work
ing with sill it's heart for the cause OF bonest CO.
yerpment. and which therefore be lieves that The
Republican party must go. en- d m ust 20 ia this
coming year Of our Lord, 1884.
" you know TIE Sun, yon like il already,
and yon will read IL with accustomed diligence
and profit during what 10 cure to be the most
interesting year In its history, n you do no,
yet know The Sun, tits high time TO get into.
the unshine.
TERMS TO NAIL SUBSCRIBERS.
The several editions OF The Sun are sept by
mail, postpsid. as follows
n
sunday edition. 81.
SutDAY-B peges. This edition furnishes
tue current news Of The world specisl arti-
Heles OF exceptional interest to everybody,
ana literary ieviews OF nes books u The high
est merit. 81 year.
bbhL1 81 syear. Weht pages Of the best
MISTER or the daily issuos an Agricultural
Department. uueqused value, special msr-
ket reports. sod literary scientific and do
nestle intelligence mske The wEyELy SUs
the Newspaper for the farmers household.
TO clubs Of ten with sloan dexirs copy free.
Address
]. w. ENGLAND, Publisher.
iHs Sun, Ny. City.
Nov, o. 1888.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

ITCHINo PTLEs-SYMPToNsA ND Cure
The symptoms are moisture, like perspira.
on, intense itching, increased by scratching,
very distressing particularly at night, seems
a. 1t pin.worms were crawling 10 and about
The rectum, the private parts are sometimee
affected fa,lowed 70 continue very serious
results may follow. SWAYNE'S OINTMENT
is pleasant, sure cure. Also for letter, Itch.
Salt Rheum, Scald Head. Erysipeas BARRIERS
Itch, Blotcbes, ali scsly, crusty skin Diseases.
Seat by mail for so cents. 3 boxes, So IS. lin
tamPs). Address. DR.. SwAYNE 4 son
Philadelphia, Pc. Sold by Druggists. Aug.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16
IRON ROOFING ROOFING ROOFING;

Dun Car ANCHORED RooPISG can BIO
laid by persons Of ordinary meobauicsl
ability 1t has stronger seams, nd
fewer raw edges, than any metallic roof
IN the world. Send for cirruIars and
prices. WIN. A. LIST & Co, Wheel.
ng. w. Va. Sole Manufacturers.
March Ia, 1884,
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

AGENTS " %1 =. ID! r. Sr, TIA E,'; :
the u. = The largest, haoGsomest best book
ever sold Tor le3s than twice our price The
fastest selling book IN America lmmeusc pro-
fits 10 agents. All intelligent people want ~
Any one can become a successful agent. Terms
free. HALIETT BOOK CO., Portland, Sains
Dec. i4 1889 ly
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

swlNE.-Do not forget that swine re.
quire green :ood as other animals. II
you 90 not wish 10 turn them loose feed
1t to them in the pen. That which they
get In ordinary 'swill' is sometimes not
onongh.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16
4 Great Cause of Human Misery
rs THE Loss OF
MANHOOD

Lecture on the Nature, Treatment an d Rad.
ical cure Of Seminal Weakness, OF Spermatoi-
rhoea, induced by Self-Abnse. Involuntary
Emissions, lmPotenoy, Nervous Debility, and
impsdiments 10 Marriage generally, Consump.
ton, Epilepsy and Fits Mental and Physical
lncapacity, &c.-By ROBERT CULVER
WELL, Al, D., author oflhe "Green Book &c.
The world renowned author, In this admir-
able Lecture, clearly proves from his own ex-
pepience that the awful consequ ences OF Self.
Abuse may be effec,uaiIy removed without
dangerous surgical operations, 6ougies, irstru-
men is, rings or cordials; poin ting out mode
OF cure at once certain and efec;ual, by which
every sufferer, no matter what his condition
may be may cure himself cheaply, privately and
radically.
~ This Lecture will prove a boon 10 thou
sands aud thousands.
Sent under zeal. In plain envelope. to any
address, on receipt Of four cents or two DOS.
age tsamPs. Address
TIE CULvERWELL MEDICAL co.
Al Ann St, New York, N. T.; Post Office Box,
Aprii q, 1854 SIN $50
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

Words o. praise are almost as ne
essary TO warm child into a genial life
as acts Of kindness and affection. Judi =
cious praise is TO children what the sun
~ to flowers.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

The Philadelphia aud Reading Rail.
road company ia going TO make test of
iron ties on its road. Iron ties are al>
ready largely used in Germany, though
they have taken little hold in England.
TIE first cost, of course, is greater than
for wooden ties, but IL is believed tina,
the long life Of the iron tic will more
than compensate for additional outlay.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16
LongfeIlow.

We may not sing like him whose songs
have touched the great worlds heart,
But VIC can for chosen few, perform at
best orr part.
And we may worship at the shrine Go.
rius has reared for him,
Before the light Of whose great mind all
other lights grow dim.
The rhythmic melody Of thought which
God to him had given,
Can find no counterpart on earth, per-
chance it may in Heaven!
LILA n. CUsHMAN.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16
Notice to Farmers.

INSTEAD Of QUE closing our bushes, a, n
ney. West Va, a. come have reno, "a nom
are now more determined To make 6rm 49, e
ing and continue our business, tb.nkinr w,
patrons for their many favors 10 the nss, s1s
very respectfully aud earnestly ak van, ~, s
tom for the coming se.son. II 10 our obi.c,
please, in selling you all useful aud pe,sss., "
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16
For Sale Cheap,
Engines, SGso Mills /,
AND TARESNERS.

Good a. new ON hand-fron purchasers
failing TO give security. Satisfaction
guaranteed. SAVE MONEY by writing
for free Circulars Of all kinda OF iuprov-
cd Mschiuerv. &c.
CARSKADON & PARSONS,
General Agency. Keyser. w. Va.
Feb. 8. 1854.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

NJ. De Lesseps' company pays out
$4,000 francs day for work on the
Panama canal.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

EDEE Ds. NJ. w Baeon -
n hLILs SPEcIuc MEDiclag guar.
enieed cure for NERVOUS DEBILITY and
Shhl WEAKNESS, ny SIERRA, NEU-
RALGlA. COMMISSIONS. and ali brain and
nerve troubles caused by self abuse, excesses
over btaia work. &c. l1s-A written guarantee
20 cure 10 every case or money refunded Send
] SC. tor postage on FREE TRIAL bex Of I 90
pills. Address DIR ". w. BACON cor. Clarke
~. and Calhoun Place Ckioeaga III.
September Z, lSs3.-Iy
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

Boys, can you tell me anything 70 =
markable in the life Of Moses p asked
a Sabbath.school teacher Yes. sirr
sbouted one Of the boys; he broke all
ne commandments at encs.'
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

How do you define black as your hat?'
said schoolmaster to one Of his pupils.
Darkness that may be felt replied the
youthful wit.
South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1884-05-16

why, Sam. how do you expect to get
that mule along with a spur only on one
eide ? Sam: We'll, boss. if l gifts dat
side 10 go, amt de udder one boun' to
keep up2'
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06
Yayaries OF the namenten.

Wards Island was the scene OF un-
usual festivity yesterday. The quarries
at the south side of the island echoed
with the sounds of music, the splashing
of water and the shouts of merry
bathers. Beneath rude shed on the
waters edge an ebony negro twanged
a guitar and sang an exquisite melody
about his hopes of having a 'sweet-
heart 10 buy me older" while two
others danced before an rS)sorbed audi
ence of about 400 gentlemen, who rep
resented the tractable inmates of the
city asylum for the insane. These 400
persons with bees in their bonnets were
enjoying a picnic gotten up for their
benefit by the authorities and enjoy it
they did hugely. Besides the guitar
fiddler assisted in making things az
melodious as possible, and gentleman
who labors under the hallucination that
he is Glmore's band and comprises
sixty pieces or more, was doing his best
to help out the symphony, assuming
rapidly succession of attitudes eX-
pressive of the requirements of playing
50 large number of instruments at
once. Others of the picnicers were
disporting themselves in q small creek
and plunging around in the water. AS
rule it was observed that no
one had much TO say to any
one else. On the contrary,
each one seemed to move
about regardless of his neighbor and
self-absorbed. When the superintend-
ent, DR.. Macdonald, who was in
charge, spoke to one of them himself,
the patient would rouse himself, smile
feebly, and plunge ut once into discus
sion of his favorite illusion. One pa
tient, tall man with q fiorid complex
ion, who wore green paper shade
over his eyes and a chicken feather
over his right ear, stated with great
confidence that he was John the Bap-
fist, and had been placed on the island
by the Almighty as His agent for re-
formatory purposes. He presented to
reporter in confidence ragged
looking letter, tied up with green
thread which he said he had that
morning received from President Gar
field. Arm in arm with this patient
was Mr.John Jacob Astor, who readily
introduced himself rs the great mil
lionaire, and offered to give the super
intendent 10000 carloads of gold to
luuu ullll Ou tHc ANtN YIN va
poleon Bonoparte casually remarked
that the only civilized people on the
face of the globe were Queen Victoria's
relatives. The rest were Hottentots,
cannibals, lunatics and alligators. AS
an illustration of his theory he pointed
out gentleman of color who certainly
bore striking resemblance tc the
missing link. The most remarkable
thing about him was his smile, but that
was sufficient. Coffee said the SUI
peliatendent, laying his hand upon his
arm, Coffee, smile" Upon which the
ape-like gentleman opened a mouth
which threw that of the late Mr.. Backus
into the shade and displayed a cavern
Gus development of jaw and set of mo-
lars which would have done credit to n
primeyal cave man. "Smile again,
Coffee said the superintendent. and
Coffee repeated the performance with
an evident satisfaction in the posses, sion
of SO unique an accomplishment. ~.
Y Times
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06
A Dog Who Died from Remorse.

A remarkable instance of the effect
that can be produced upon n dog by the
human voice was related to me yester-
day. Some of your CORRESPONDENTS
would consider it contirmatory of their
notion that dogs have mind enough to
understand words; but j myself rather
believe that the sound Of the voice acts
upon the feelings of dumb animals just
as instrumental music acts upon us.
The story is rs follows: A clergyman
had for a long time dog, and no other
domestic animal. He and his servant
made great pet of the dog. AT last,
however, the clergyman took to keep
ing few fowls, and the servant fed
them. The dog showed himself very
jealous and out of humor at this, and
when Sunday came round and he was
left alone he took the opportunity to
kill and bury two hens. A claw half
uncovered betrayed what he had done.
His master did not beat him, but took
hold of him and talked TO him most
bitterly, most severely. you've been
guilty of the sin of murder, strand on
the Sabbath day, too; and you, a
clergyman's dog, taking mean adj
vantage of my absence!' etc He talked
IN and on for long time, in the same
serious and reproachful strain. Early
the next morning the master had to leave
home for day or so; and he did so
without speaking a word of kindness to
the dog, because he said he wished him
to feel himself in disgrace. On his re-
turn the first thing he was told was:
"The dog Is dead He never ate nor
drank after you had spoken to him; he
just lay and pinned away, and he died
an hour ago. VI. u. Giitum, IN Lon
don Spectator.
Fifteen years ago Horace Greeley
was ridiculed because he said he had
seen herd of buflalocs fifteen miles
long and half that distance wide. Yot
this was comparatively a small herd.
On the Upper Missouri they were seen
a dozen years ago blackening the coun.
try for scores Of miles in every diroc-
ton. To-day buffalo is very rarely
found even In Dakota. They have
been coopcd up in the northern corner
of Montana, and even there will sooi,
become extinct unless speedy action 10
taken toprotcct them. chicago Times.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06
What Sailors in the Navy Eat.

There is not much change in the bill o.
fare of sailcr on board ship. What he
shall eat and what he shall drink is a
matter of official regulation, and it is
most strictly adhered to. On Sunday he
is given the following: Fourteen ounces
of buiscuit, three-quarters of a pound OF
preserved meat, half pound of rice,
four ounces of sugar, either half an
ounce of tea or two ounces of coffee, two
ounces of butter and six ounces of toma-
toes. On Monday he receives the same
quantity of bread and one pound of salt
pork, the same quantity of tea and sugar
and half pint of beans. On Tuesday
he is served with one pound of salt beef,
half pound of -four and two ounces OF
evaporated apples. On Wednesday he
gets one pound of pork again, half pint
of beans with four ounces of pickles.
The bill of fare on Thursday is the same
as Wednesday with the addition of half a
pint of molasses. Friday is the same as
Tuesday, Saturday is repetition of Mon
day, with the addition Of half pint of
vinegar.
Not only do the men care little for the
preserved beef, but they also have no
particular fondness for rice. Very fire.
quently when the rations are served the
men do not take rice, and they even fire.
quently omit to take -four. They are
always fond, however, of their salt pork
and beans, and it is asserted when they
are in port, with the opportunity Of get
ting fresh meat and vegetables, they will
ask that their favorite dish be continued.
A sailor will, however, frequently in
crease the variety of his food and add
several luxuries to his bill of fare by
very ingenious arrangement. The law
provides that il a man does not use ra-
tons which are assigned to him, that he
shall receive thirty cents day in lieu
thereof. The rations arc more bountiful
than single man can cat and ii is usu-
ally the custom for one man in every five
to commute his rations and take the
money value in place of it. There are
twenty men in mess, one of whom is
the mess cook. For his services in pre-
pairing the meal he commutes his rations,
and is fed by the rest of the men out of
their allowance and keeps the thirty cents
for his own private Use. Three others of
the twenty, however, also commute their
rations and are fed out of the allowances
of the remaining number of their mess.
The thirty cents which they each receive
is turned into general mess fund, which
increases at the rate of ninety cents a
day. When the men are in port one of
their number is empowered to spend this
money in procuring fruits and other lux
uries. In no other naval service can an
arrangement like this be carried out. The
rations served in the French and English
navies is entirely too meagre to allow a
sailor to be fed from the superabundance
of his messmates' allowance. In some Of
the foreign navies, also, Communication is
not allowed, and sailor has 10 take what
is given him whether he can eat IL OF
not Washington Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06
Nervous Energy.

II was travelling slowly down a
narrow rocky mountain pass in the
winter of '64," said n sporting man
in a Denver hotel, a few months ago,
"when, on making an abrupt turn, !
found myself face to face with an
enormous grizzly bear. My pathway
was less than three feet wide; there
was n chasm hundreds of feet deep at
my left and cold, pitiless rocks rising
perpendicularly, it seemed to me, to
the very zenith at my right. Before
me the grizzly stood for half second
and then dashed savagely at me with
his mouth wide open fully two feet
wide. 1t would have been worse than
senseless TO have turned and run back
up the pass, and hadn't the sign of
a weapon about me, not even a rock.
There was but one thing to do, and |
did it. | rolled up my shirt sleeves to
my very shoulder, and as the bear
bounded upon me | plunged my arm
straight down his throat to the base
of his tail. l chung to this with the des-
peration of drowning man, wrench
ing and pulling on it with all my
strength. In about two minutes, or
less, succeeded in turning that ami
NAL inside out, and he quitely am
bled down the pass before me to the
valley below. He was remarkable
looking object, | assure you. But my
life was saved, and l did not linger
very long to criticize the beasts APP
pearance after we struck a double
track. | am not a man Of herculean
strength, and what l have said mere
ly goes to show the immense amount
of NERVOUS energy" that is often bot
tied up in very small human pack
ages. Chicago News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06
The Leaves OF n Tree.

In recent lecture Professor Beal
talked about leaves. Among other
good things he said As is well
known, n tree can rot grow without
leaves. These are put forth every year
and are continuance for vastly increa-
sing the surface. An oak tree of good
size exposes several acres OF surface to
the mir during the growing season. 1t
has been estimated that the Washing
ton elm at Cambridge, Mass, not u
very large tree, exposes about five acres
of foliage, il we include both sides of
the leaves. Leaves are more nearly
comparable To stomachs than TO lungs.
A leaf is a labratory for assimilating or
manufacturing raw materials into plant
fabric. The cellular structure of the
leaves, wood and bark of tree is a
complicated subject to treat in a popu-
lar way. 1t requires n vast surface of
leaves to do little work. BY counting
the leaves on a Seeding oak and esti-
mating the surface on both sides of
each, we can see how many inches are
needed to build up the roots and stem
for the first year. After the first year
the old stem of the oak bears no leaves.
1t is dependent on the leaves of the
branches, or its children for support.
A tree is sort of community. each
part having its own duties to perform
The root hairs take up most of the nour-
ishment. The young roots take this to
the larger ones, and they in turn, like
the branches of river, pour the flood
of crude sap into the trunk, which con-
veys it to tho leaves. The assimilated
or digested sap passes from the leaves
to all growing parts of the plant, and
n deposit is made where most needed.
If branch is much exposed to the winds,
the base of it has certain support or
certain amount of nourishment. So with
the trunk of tree. If the base of
branch of the main trunk is much ex-
posed to the winds and storms, a much
thicker deposit of food is made there.
The winds give tree exercise, which
seems good to help make it strong. Our
toughest wood comes from trees grow
ing in exposed places. The limbs of
tree are all the time striving with each
other to see which shall have the most
room and the most sunshine. While
some perish in the attempt, or meet
with only very indifferent success, the
strongest of the strong buds survive.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06

A miller, who attempted to be wit
ty at the expense of a youth of weak
intellect, accosted him with: John,
people say that you are fool" On
this John replied: 81 don't know
that | am, sir; | know some things
sir, and something's | don't know, sir. u
"Well, John, what do you know p
81 know that millers always have fat
hogs, sir" "And what don't you
know ?" 81 don't know whose corn
they eat, sir."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1884-02-06
ALPENA WEEKLY ARGUS.
MISCELLAN E0US.
MOTHER AND CHILD.

Ritter blasts md vapor m
What had they to do with him2
Spring, though she was far away,
Took dominion for day,
Filled the air with bfcathings soft,
Babe n skylnrk s'ng aloit,
When we laid him in his bed,
Cloudlcss blue above his head.
II was not for him 10 reach
Manly height, aud thought. ard speech
Not to climb untrOddcn sleeps,
Not To search out unknown deepS,
Not through warning 10y aud pam
kinglincRs of soul To gain.
He had only baby words,
Little music, like birds,
Swcctly inarticulatc,
Nothing wise, nor high, nor great
Sunny smiles and kisses sweet
White and softly childish feet
Curls that floated on the breeze
We remember him for these.
They arc weary who are wise.
He looked up with happy eyes,
Little knowing, little seeing,
Only praising God by being.
oh, the life We could not savel
DO not say, above his grave,
That the fair and darling face
Was hut lent little space
Till the Father called him back,
nv mn unknown homcward track.
No. though Death came darkly chill
Babe the beating heart be stu.
Touching him with fingers cold
What was given still we hold;
Though he died, as die the flowers,
He for eyermore is ours.
Ours, though we must travel soon
Onward throug LIES aftcrnooni
Shadows, falling long and gray,
Gather round the western day,
And orr twilight visions show
How the years shall come ana so.
Little maids. with tangled curls,
Change 10 slender, dreamy girls;
Chubby rogucs grow tall, and then
Go their way rs bearded men.
And the mother stands aside,
With an ache beneath her pride,
And n sorrow mid her Joys,
For the vanished babes and boys;
SO the earlier gladness wanes-
But tho little one remains.
For house that once has known
Tiny feet on stair and stone
Steps that mover more shall sounC
Feet at rest beneath tho ground
Keeps remembrance of the dead,
And the music of their tread.
Not at MONDAY, busy, bright,
Only in the quiet night,
With a thrill of sweetest pain,
Comes that music once again,
Heard i'm stiffness and apart
Echoed from his mothers heart.
-MdIgdrtt IClcH IN Century MGgdztT'S.