The Arizona champion., 1884-06-07
LATEST FROM HADES.
New Instrument by Which CoininunicA- ton is Established with the Departed.

I have heard what I hdUe, and yet live, move and have my being. The sun shines just as brightly, and the beer gurgles dewn wy throat with the same easy glide as it did yesterday, and yet within the short space of twenty four hours, and within fifty yards of where am now writing, have had ex- periences that have made my hair turn white in a single night with perfect fright, as we'll it might. It is terrible thing to be "uncanny," as the Scotch say and grieve to say that that is what now am. Ever since l tapped that internal wire, which l did by pure accident, have lived the life of the damned. Iknew they would find it out, and that His Satanic Majesty would never let me hear the end of it. Nor has he. found note lying on my table when l returned from the EnQuir- er office. The whole room reeked of the smell of birthstone and sulphur, and the paper burned my fingers when l touched it. It read as follows:
 ''He that steals what isn't hisn
 Goes to hell or else to prism.
 "You have busted me out of my copy I'll pay you out. You've MAN UF II. GAZETTE.
 His S< mark"
 And sure enough he has! Every night I hear the groans and curses of the damned The neighbors avoid me, and the house is summed like plague spot. And the worst of it all is that 1 can't find that internal wire again. If l could cnly do that would send the devil few points about one or two people here that would make his work easier, and earn his forgiveness. But l can't find it. Every inch of my garden has been dug over, and it was in digging last night that l came upon this other thing, which is almost more wonderful than the first. "In for a cent, in for dollar; ;" "The whole hog or none; !" "As well be hung for sheep as lamb," have al ways been my fayorte notices, and |, even ii this should bring upon me the wrath of purgatory, as we'll as hell, l must send it to you. How it came about was in this wise: had decided to give mp digging for the night, and throw my spade down with an angry shove into a hole, when l felt it strike something. Hello thought l, here is the wire; but, on removing the soil, found that it was not wire, but an iron box, and an ex- traordnary burning sound was going on inside. tried to lift it, but failed, so I cleaned the earth all around it and with chisel pried the lid off. Great Jeru- saleml What yell came out of the box! I jumped about three feet in the air and landed out of the hole. could distinguish words in English, French, German, Greek, Turkish, Chinese and Japanese, with here and there the soft, melliluous never-to-be-forgotten oaths of the Sandwich Islands. What was it? I summoned up courage enough to jump into the hole and examine the box. The box itself was empty, but in one corner I noticed wire protruding, and from it all the sounds seemed to issue. Of course, could tell at once that it was not a telegraph-wire. Could it be telephone? Suddenly I remem- bered that short message had gone along the wire, in which the lieophone, an instrument similar to the telephone, was mentioned as being in use in purga- tory. This then was it; but how to make use of itp We'll, am bit of mechanical genius, and l at once set to work, and by the aid of an old brass kettle, piece of wire and pair of bel lows, rigged up machine that enabled me to hear every thing that went on in this wonderful halfway house, and I now send it to you. You can make whatever use you please of it. Only, after all the risk have run to give you information that is worth millions of dollars to the civilized globe, don't you go back upon me and say that it is not true, because it is. Obedently yours,
 ANANIAs K. SAPPHIRA.
 At first it was difficult to understand word or make out what was going on, but at last there was lull, and sent out loud "Hello" "Hello yourself" came back; "who are you, and what do you want?"
 "First of all, tell me what place I am communicating with. Am I right in thinking that it is purgatory?" Here could hear some one laughing and staggering like to burst. "It is; but We call it not purgatory, which is a mortal name for it, but the Greek name, Donophabituos Pols. Now who are you and what do you want?" 'I'm poor young man, please, from the Enquirer, and want some informa- ton. You know a lot of people up here don't believe there is such place as purgatory." "Poor fools! We'll, I must say it is mighty entsrprising of the Enquirer, | and I'll be glad to do what I can for you, so fire away"
 "Well, who are you?" 'l sir, am the spirit of he who when ] in the flesh was known as George Wash ington, the Father of His Country" "Great Cssar's ghost but you don't | mean to tell me, George, that you are there. Why, if ever there was saint in heaven, we all thought you were bound to be a boss. How on earth did you manage it?"
 "How little you know! Why, I have good company here. Moses is here, and won't be out for another hundred years. He is here for the promised land busi- ness, and King David is here for that little .hing of Uriah's wife, while Pm here for the little hatchet lie; but I'm