The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1884-08-24
HUNTING FOR H.

This Il OFlannigan's account OF II a. he
told II to me. Ihave made no alterations. BE-
ing unwilling to take any responsibilities upon
myself In matter ofsuoh Importance. Said he:
There are more fools in the world than you
would think for. When our Geographical 3d.
cisty met last We found that zoe had got hold OF
one This was the new member. So Just set
It down a . maxim then. that II fools can
work their way into ovon Geographical 30.
clety. there isn't any place that's safe against
them. However. thats neither here nor there;
simply mention 1t in passing; It hasn't any
thing to do with what I started out to toll you
about.
Well. a. Twas saying before. I WAS loaded up
solid with my sublime project. I was ies-
terng volcano Of excitement It was "a much
40 could do to hold In till my turn should
come. And when 1t did come. at last was In
such state that could only pant 1t out In
broken phrases. with gaspings for breath be-
tween. Itmade an immense stir. 1t was re-
ceived with prodiRious favor. Tho end Of
every sentence was drowned In applause. i
closed by saying:
so. gentlemen. my project. In word. 10 to
send out q discovery expedition to search for
new and director road to Hail" pronounced
II hail. out OF Difference to the society. all the
members being religious: but you oan pro-
nounco IL your own way.
Il sat down amid n storm Of applause which
lasted several minutes. during which my hand
was wrung by throng after throng Of geos-
raphers. who said my idea was the Rrandest
ono Of the age and would make my name i'm
mortal.
Quiet was hardly restored whom tho now
member spoke up and said:
But who wants to GO 10 Hailr He pro-
nounced 1t the old way
1t was most strange question. Members
glanced at each other In surprised and some-
what aflronted way. and said nothing. Then
the new member spoke up again;
Nobody wants to 20 to Hail nobody wants
to travel any road to Hail: so where in the ma
ton 10 the use In hunting UP new one' p
After an awkward pause the President said.
with cold and cruel blandness OF tone and
manner:
1T is evident that our now acquisition IL not
familiar with the ways Of 90 geographical socaties.
II he will reflect "a moment. 1t may occur to him
that his question need he changed in words
only. not in sense. to read, Where is the use in
searching for tho Northwest passage2'"
1t was an awful shot. pitied the poor ass
with all my heart; and could sec that others
did. too, though naturally we couldn't help en-
joying the annihilating completeness Of the
Presidents retort. But what do you think? 1t
never pheazed the now member at all. He didn't
know he was hit-he actually didn't. No. he
looked up As sweet and innocent as tho child
unborn. and says:
"'In my day have wanted TO ask that very
question as much as upward Of o halia million
times
III he didn't say It, wish may never stir.
And he didn't stop there. either. but goes right
on as calm as anything. and says:
What do you want Of Northwest passage.
anyway. after you've got it2 Do you calculate
that anybody is going to use itp
'Use TIP says the President. who saw that
sarcasm WAS wasted on this numhscull. and
didn't propose to throw away any more OF 1t on
him; No. We don't expect anybody to use It.
There would ba no occasion to use 1t anyway.
because the old routes arc far better and quick
or and easier. And besides. nobody could use
It, for the reason that from tho nature OF the
climate and tho shortness OF the season 1t ia
simply non-usuable.'
Well. them says the new member a. calm
as that door knob there. what do you want
1t for
Want 1t for p says the President. rather
hoty. We don't Uant 1t. We only want to
find it.
Woll that is odd says the now member,
i don't seem to got your idea. somehow.
What do you want to find 1t for. II you don't
want it after you've found II? As I UNDER
stand it. England and America and other coun-
tries have been hunting for 1t for fifty years.
and they've spent about sa5, 900. 600 and got no
end Of ships mashed up in tho ice and no end
Of men frozen to death. and scurviad to death,
and starved TO death. aud 40 OH. and buried
around. hero and there. on a lot Of skinned
rocks in the Arctic ocean-and that's all
that's been accomplished; and 1t appears to
me it's big price to pay and a long ways to
go Just to start an international graveyard.
Yes. and Us said BEFORE the thing that Is too
many for mo il. what do you want to find that
Northwest passage for. II you don't want it
after you've found itY
My friend says the President. pretty
fiercoly. If You knew anything about geo.
graphical societies. you wouldn't ask so foolish
and irrelevant a question. Geographic al socia-
tics do not trouble themselves to hunt for
things that arc wanted everybody does that
there Is no occasion to gnthor together a learn
od und expensive organization for such u pl,r-
rose. II Is the distinct aud peculiar province
q; q gsoErapniGn society to hunt for things
nesnI ihs tmey are needed but simply to prove
doncay aud moved III and preteS D 10 n In
terest himself IN our new chart. Wherein the
70" III In Gs Sn liz .s Tho
.
Tor the Northwest Passag" are ingeniously con-
trass,nd.
|. y" Tho society now settlel down to business.
and asked mo for the details of my projsct.
said TINT. 70 begin with, exhaustive study and
Investigation had convinced me TINT Hail WINS
not located within the body of our globe hence
inferred thnt 1t must be above us somewhere
doubtless In suinD part Of the empty space
between us and the stars. Continuing | said:
propose to employ balloons inflated with
pure oxygen. ! would not send 2 fleet Of bal
the society to pntition Congress for an appro-
prlation o. 1850 900 TOR the equipment and eX:
start the first one up, say. about tho beginning
~ tho coming, summer. would start up
a year later. After M interval of .
year more. | would start M the third
70 hunt for tho other two. and bring home
buttons and other, such relics OF the crews as
might be found. Every year thereafter l would
send M u fresh balloon to hunt for the previous
bnloons and carry relief to the surviyors-that
r., Eravesio one nnd monnments and so on. to
might soc tham from Tina to Tina and ha re-