McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886, 1884-07-10

"sFeller citizens, do you hear thatr
exclaimed old Simmons.
"sYes, do you hear that?' whimpered
MISS Puss, sand that, too, after gainin'
my hearts affections. Will my friends
desert me in this, my souls darkest
hourp' and she put her head on rascaliy
fathers shoulder and sobbed.
"'I call on the men what 1ected
me- said old Simmons in broken
voice, ster see the wrong righted.
Barter, don't tar yer tender heart with
this weepin.' STAN up and face him
like man. and indeed she did, i'm
pressing me more with the idea that
she was q man, q very nngentlemanly
man, than that she was q woman.
"sThis is mighty strange affair." said
the county Judge, who lad put in anap-
pearance. Il don't know that nothin'
like it ever happened afore in my juris-
diction, but the strangeness of it don't
tend in no way to excuse the man, fur
when man wins the love of q woman,
if thar, an it KANT be helped l don't
like to interfere in matters of this sort,
but I'll be blamed if this county is goin'
to stand quietly by an see one of its
fairest darters imposed on. I'm q
father myself, and when thatred-headed
Teller from over the swamp gained the
love of my darter Luco an then tried
ter run away, why, I follered him with
a shotgun, an compelled him ter seek
refuge in her lovin' arm. This here edi-
tor man come amongst us thinkin' that
he knew it all. He thought that we
was slouches and yaps. The fust thing
he done in his paper was ter gin me
advice about the financial affairs of
this here county. This, teller citizens,
is a privilege that l don't allow no
man, an especially ter stranger. I
believe he's guilty. I know in reason
that he has gained the fections of this
here young creetur, for woman amt
the pusson ter take on like this lessen
somethin' has been said. I think that
| have about as mnch influence in this
county as any other man, an blame eff I
don't raise the war cry again this chap
an make him marry the gall
"'Oh, thank you for them kind
Words Puss replied, lifting her red
eyes. you have kind heart, judge,
and know what it is to be deceived. 1
know wimmen air weak and often love
when they should hate, but oh. we
can't help it. Although my darlin'
here has deceived me, yet love him,
oh, love him, and I will sink down
into an untimely grave if 1 do not mar
~ him.
"'Do not take me away she i'm
plored. sDo not let him pass forever
from my sight,"
"sNo, Squire, don't take her away,
said the Judge. in seemin' justice to
man, father is sometimes unjust to
his darter. We all ken see that her
heart is broke, an if possible we shall
see it mended. Bring the par to my
office an I will marry them
"Oh, delightful love- exclaimed
Puss. ooh, blissful union! Oh, noble
Judge that you air. Darling turning
to me, and g ew sick. contem-
plated flight, for I saw that the old
jedge was desperately in earnest.
ssCome," said the high official, and
he took hold of my shoulder.
"'In moment; allow me to wash
my face and hands,"
Certainly, but be quick
"sI'll be quick and springing
through the doorway, I bounded over
the ground like deer. Oh, but flew
I was followed for several miles, but
my fright gave me wonderful speed.
After travelling two days without a
thing to eat, stopped at cross road
store, and while devouring a can of
cove oysters, heard familiar voice
in an adjoining room. moved up close
/ to the thin partition, and heard the fol-
lowing:
eyes, he went out and started a
paper. An old justice of the peace
didn't want him there, and concluded
to frighten him away, so while the
editor was at supper, the squire went
to the Office and cut large
hole in the wall. That night,
while the editor was writing,
the old fellow slipped up, and with
a hoopole punched the gentleman. 1t
almost scared him to death, but he
finally went to work again. The old
man gave him another punch and he
howled and ran out. The Squire
crawled under the house and escaped
observation. After awhile the editor
went to bed and the Squire damned
him black and blue with the pole. He
drew pistol from under his pillow and
the squire accidentally knocked the
thing out of his hand. It went off and
would have wounded him seriously had
not the ball passed through several
quilts. The device failed, and the
old fellow tried another game. He
gave me ten dollars to slip in a no.
tice announcing the engagement of the
editor and Miss Puss, the old squares
daughter. laid around out of sig int, but
keeping my eye on the situation. The
old man took his girl to the editor and
they had a lively time. The county
judge, who did not understand the
joke, declared that the editor should
marry the girl-well, in short the edi-
tor hoped out, and regardless of his
wounded leg, ran like greyhound.
Don't blame him for running, for she is
tho T1p1iosf oirl in tho sfofo Tho IF