Omaha daily bee., 1884-12-12
AMERICAN quo
\ Display That WA Astonish tn
CocknCys in tSS8
Chicago Tiues.

COCknCyS III 1850
Chicago Times.
Engiishmen are promising themselves
"a rich treat" year after next. Com.
mencing on the Isl of May, 1886, a great
American fair is TO be- held in London.
IL will embrace an exhibition of samples
of all our products. This will be only
one of the features of tho great show.
The managers state that the system of
organizing and working our great rail
way, mining and manufacturing COM
panies will be shown in all the details.
If this promise is fulfilled. the exhibition
will be very interesting and instructive
to tho slow.going inhabitants of the old
world. They will have an opportunity
to see o halt o dozen impecunious indi-
wduals organize themselves into a com.
pany to build q railroad o thousand miles
long. They will see how these people gos
to work to procure a cash subsidy of
S70,0 goo per mile and the alternate sec.
tions of land for ten miles ON either side
of the road. They will next see how pa
per towns are laid out and lots old
at prices rarely realized in Europ a
cities a thousand years old. The ope r.
ton of watering stock will, Of course, be
illustrated. A gentleman of much eXpe-
rience in this featuss of railroading in
New York is expected to conduct this de-
partment of the show; Visitors will then
have an opportunity to see how the orig
inal stockholders are t'sold out" and how
the stock is manipulated 30 that shares
are sold at a hundred per cent above par
one day and fifty per cent below the
next. On a railroad In full operation
there will be q collision nearly every day
for the amusement of the spectators. On
days when special attractions are prom
ised outlaws p~ersonating the james
gang will shoot the conductors, rob tina
passengers and make off with their plum
der. An expert ~''baggage smasher" will
illustrate our peculiar methods of hand
ling trunks at stations. A vendor of
prlze-psckages, popcorn and peanuts will
accompany each train and make himself
disagreeable.
There is to be an illustration of the
way 9 ections are conducted in this coun-
try. To make this department of the ex-
hibition complete, the method of
packing a caucus, manipulating a nomin-
atlng convention and constructing party
| platforms should DO shown. A torchiight
procession will also be necessary. OF
course there will be stump speeches with
out number. The operation of tlinging
mud at candidates will be shown. The
method of stuting ballot boxes should be
illustrated. 1t Is expected that Louisiana .
will contribute a returning board to the
exhibition, and perhaps the national gov
eminent will send over an electoral COM
mission. After the election is over, the
successful party will probably illuminate
the tower Ct London, Westminster abbey,
st. Paul's cathedral the parliament house
and other noted buildings. Bells will be
rurg, csnno fired, end sky rockets shot
off. There will be a general suspension
of business for a week. Most of the
money in the Bank of England will be
drawn out to use in settling election bsts.
OF course there will be numerous sus.
pensions and failures, but the people Of
the city where the or at exhibition is to
be held should learn that these are likely
to follow every general election. All tho
hospitals will be filed with persons who
were injured during the great celebration.
The defeated party will proceed to give a
hundred and ninety-fve reasons why
they lost the election. 1t is expected
that the English people will so greatly
enjoy the mimic representation of one of
+ our popular elections that they will i'm
mediately proceed to adopt them. The
exhibition will consequently be the
means of doing excellent missionary
work.
There is to be an American newspaper
printed In one of the buildings, but the
managers of the exhibition neglect to
o state whether the ''patent insIdes' are to
, be furnished by an establishment In chi.
cago or Milwaukee. There will also be
american restaurants, ice drink
pavilions, and bars" The establishment
, of the latter institutions will guaranteed
q the financial SUCCESS of the exhibition.
Englishmen may not consider our bever-
ages superior to those they are &C.
u customed to, but they will greatly enjoy
seeing the way the drinks ''are set up."
Every manner of ''~standing treat" will,
of course, be illustrated. There will be
a Kentucky treat" which will be
"oharged up" to the party ordering It,;
an "Ohio treat" In which every member
of the party pays for the grog he drinks,
and a mississippi river treat, for the
payment of which the different
members of the company shake dice.
J. There is to be "a separate hall for
the display and sale of articles made by
American Indians. This is good news
for the proprietors of several manufac-
tories of "gimcracks" in Massachusetts
0 and Connecticut. They have been run
ming on 'short time" lately, and some Of
their mills have ''shut down." During
the past few years they have made more
Indian pipes, moccasins, bask lis, and
n canoes than could be profitably disposed
of at Mackinaw, Niagara Falls and other
. places where such articles have been dis
v posed of In the largest quantities, The
! prospect of a large foreign demand for
these goods will probably cauae all the
mills in which they are made to start up
again at their full capacity. The exhibit
ton will doubtless prove to be a good
a thing for our people as we'll as for the
English. If the enterprising manufac-
, turers of ''Indian curiosities" improve
their opportunity they cannot fail TO
I realize fortunes.