The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1884-05-01
"reminiscences of Southern Pulpit Elo-
Quence.
BY MRS. H. B. JOHNSON.

METHODIST camp-meetIng IN the 1nGeT-
ior of Georgia, and heard a sermon
which | have never yet been able to
forget or describe. At the earnest So
hcitation of friends | have attempted
several times to write it. But it can
not be put ON paper. The main force
of it was in the snufing and splitting
and groaning and hound-after-a-fox
sort Of yelp and whine, to which no
pen can do justice. 1t must be inton-
ed to be appreciated. | have preach
ed it thousand times for the amuse-
ment of friends, and have been satis-
fled with my effort. | have used it as
a remedial agent in exercising the de-
mons Of hypochondria, and have new
er failed Ito send them down steep
place in the sea" or somewhere else,
to the great relief of the sufferer.
The, speaker had just been licensed
and it was his first sermon. In per-
son he was small, bullet-headed, of a
fair, sandy complexion, and his coun-
tenance was indicative OF sincerity
and honesty.
His remarks evinced great reverence
for the works of God as manifested in
zoology and natural history. and "he
was taking up the Bible in regular or
dear for the first time in his life" He
had gotten as far as the history Of
Noah, the Ark, the Flood, etc. Be
sides ''just before his conversion he
had been reading Goldsmith's Ami
mated Mater; and the two together,
by the aid and assistance Of the Sper-
| it, had led him into powerful train
of thinking as he stood at his work
bench day in and day out"
But whatever his sermon may have
been, it was his own. The text was
"As it was in the days Of Noah. SC
shall the coming Of the Son Of Man
be-" After commenting upon that
portion Of Genesis descriptive Of the
Flood, he warmed up" suddenly, and
broke out in the following strains:
Eyes, my bretheren, the heavens o1
the windows was opened-ah, and the
floods of the great deep kivered the
waters-ah; and there were Shem, and
there Ham, and there Japheth-ah, all
a-gwine into the Ark-ah.
"And there was the elephant-ah
that great animal-ah, of which
Goldsmith describes in his Animated
Nater-ah, what is as big as house-ah
and his bones as big as tree-ah, de-
pending somewhat on the size of the
tree-ah, ALL a-gwine into the Ark-ah.
And the heavens Of the windows was
opened-ah, and the floods of the
great deep kivered the waters-ah;
and there was Shem, and there was
Ham, and there was Japheth-ah all
a-gwine into the Ark-ah.
"And there was the hippotamus-ah,
that great animal-ah Of which
Goldsmith describes in his Animated
Mater r'-ah, what has great horn
ah stickin' right straight up out of
his forehead-ah six feet long, more or
less-ah, depending somewhat upon the
length of it-ah, ALL a-gwine into the
Ark-ah.
"And there was the giraffe-ah, my
bretheren-ah, that ill-contrived reptile
of which Goldsmith describes in his
Animated Mater '-ah, whose fore-legs
is twenty-five feet long-ah, more or
less-ah, depending somewhat on the
length of 'em-ah, aand neck SO long
he can eat hay off the top of barn
ah, depending somewhat ON the hithe
of the barn-ah, all a-gwine into the
Ark-ah. And the heavens of the
windows was opened-ah, and the
floods Of the great deep kivered the
waters-ah; and there was Sham, and
there was Hem, and there was ia
pheth-ah, all a-gwine into the Ark
ah.
"And there was the zebra-ah, my
bretheren-ah. that beautiful an
imal of which Goldsmith describes in
his Animated Nater-ah, what has
three hundred stripes a-runnin' rig hit
straight around his body-ah, more or
less-ah, depending somewhat on the
number of stripes-ah, and nary two
stripes alike-ah, all a-gwine into the
Ark-ah.
"And there was the Anaconder-ah,
that great sarpint of which Gold
smith describes in his Animated Ma
ter'-ah, what can swallow six oxen at
a meal-ah, provided his appetite don't
call for less-ah. all a-gwine into the
Ark-ah And the heavens Of the win
dows was opened-ah. and the floods Of
the great deep kivered the waters-ah; ;
and there was Shem. and there was
Ham, and there was Zapheth, all a.
gwine into the Ark-ah.
And there was the lion-ah, breth-
eren-ah, what is the king Of beasts
all, accordin' to Scripter-ah, and who,
as st. Paul says-ah. prowls around of
a night like roarin' devil-ah. a-seek-
in if he can't catch somepody-ah, all
a-gwine into the Ark-ah.
And there was the antelope-ah, my
bretheren-ah, that frisky little critter-
alb, of which Goldsmith describes in
his Animated Mater '-ah, what can
jump seventy-fye foot straight up-ah.
and twice that distance down-ah, pro-
vided his legs will take him that fur
ah, all a-gwine into the Ark-ah.
And the heavens Of the windows was
opened-ah, and the floods of the great
deep kivered the waters-ah; and there
was Hem, and there was Sham, and
there was Japheth-ah, all a-gwine
into the Ark-ah. And the heavens of
the windows was opened, and the
floods of the great deep kiyered the
waters-ah; and there was Hem, and
there was Sham, and there was ia
pheth-ah, all a-gwine into the Ark
ah."
Just at this point he stopped speak
ing few moments, wiped his fore
head, turned back his wristbands, ran
his fingers through his hair, spit and
and rubbed his boot in it, drank lit
tie water, commenced on lower key.
and proceeded as follows:
"But time would fail me, my breth-
e1en-ah, to describe all the animals
that went into the Ark-ah. Your pa