davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03
Mathews the Elder and the Judge.

Mathews the elder, being in Shrews-
bury one assize time, turned into court
for an hour amusement. He had not
been there many minutes when an ush-
er put note in his land trimmings
"Judge PARK hopes that Mr., Mathews
will come and sit by him." Threading
his way through the crowd, the gratiiiedt
comedian mounted the judgment seat
and humbly yet proudly took the place
awarded him. The Judge shook him
cordially by the hand, put the trial on
before him and a packet of sandWl hes
at his elbow, and made him altogether
comfortable. Two or three years alter
ward Mathews was staying with niS
friend Rolls, and over the wine ana
walnuts the latter asked the actor Il ne
had met Justice Park somewhere, .
question setting Mathews in such
praise of the Judge that Rolls could nos
keep from laughing. and so raising sus,
picion. "Did he say anything about
ne?'' queried Mathews. .tRel " was
the reply, "he was here not long ago
and said to me: i think, Rolls, you are
friend of Mathews, the actor, VINO
has such a dreadful propensity for tax
ing people off. Imagine my constants
ton at Shrewsbury two years ago on
seeing him directly in front of me, evl-
IDENTIFY studying me with the intention
of showing me up. What do you THINK ilS
did? sent a courteous message 70
him and invited him to come and SIT Dy
me; and so, trust, propjtiated nm
that he will have too much good ieenng
ever to introduce me into his gallery y
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

After having played bar or two
of "Midsummmer Nights Dream" at
a concert in Memphis recently, Herr
Sternberg suddenly ceased, looked up
at the gallery, then made a little bow
to the audience, and declared that he
could not play while peanuts were be-
ing cracked and that the gentlemen so
engaged must cease or he must ask to
be excused. There was q dead silence
and Mr.. Sternberg resumed. AS the
appeal reporter critically remarks
the peanut has no soul for music.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03
The Argentine Confederation.

The Argentine Confederation is COM
posed of group of fourteen states and
provinces and four territories, whose
population, according to the census of
1862 and estimated areas, are as fol-
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

Denver. Col, contains more Chinese
women than any other American city
outside of California. They appear on
the street clad in wide, loose trousers,
gayly bedecked in gstldy colors, and
always carrying an immense red or
silk handkerchief in one hand and .
parasol in the other Chicago Journal
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03
Why They Are Not Wanted.

Boys who expect soon to begin to
work for living may proftably con-
slider some facts recently reported by
an employment agent in the city Of New
York.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

Miss Emily Faithful goes to Colors'
do for the purpose of observingthe con-
&tions of life with view to the emf.
grafton of English women. a society
formed by the Princess Louise Is IN
terested in the scheme.--Detro@ Fos''
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

Some girls can't catch on to the
fashionable walk. Why. girls. that's
easily done, when you know how. Just
walk along slow and lazy like; give a
little shove to the right and left at each
step; act as if you had no elasticity in
your step, as if each foot were held
back by stiff mud, and the wind was
kind of blowing you back at each step.
and you have got it.-NeUport Journal.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

Oscar Wilde remarked of Henry
lrving's legs that one was q rs
phony and the other beautiful poem
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

After twenty-five years of exile at
Siberia the Russian writer, Tchernis-
chefski, has been allowed to return to
his home to husband out life's taper in
its close. ;" The poor man is now sixty
yearf of age. but It is hardly necessary
to say that his long years of exile have
made him look more like centenarian
than anything else. He is hardly able
to walk and scarcely weighs hundred
pounds. Tchernischefskf was exiled
during the riots of 1862.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1884-01-03

"A curious story comes from Brent
ford, England. A servant of DIR. Terry
was sent out to carry a message. She
was short-sighted, and falling to return
it was feared she had fallen into the
canal. 1t was dragged. but without
success. Several days later an old
barge woman suggested that loaf of
bread, in which some quicksilver had
been placed, should be foated on the
water. This was done and the loaf
became stationary at a certain point.
The dragging was resumed at this point
and the body found. The superstition
is said to be centuries old, but no one
had seen it tried there for many year.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
Tho Kew "Holstein" Cattle Furore.

The cattle of the Netherlands are at
tracing more attention from the dairy
farmers of the country than any other
breed. For many years they have been
carefully bred, with nm aim to produce
large quantities of milk. Doubtless the
quantity of the mild has been less an
object with the breeders of Holland;
but when we'll fed cows give enormous
quantities of milk, and the milk can DO
disposed Of as such, the profit Is almost
invariably greater to the producer than
if the quality were better and the guam
tity less. Besides, milk of low quality
is poor in fat, but not necessarily poor
in cheese substance. The districts
whence they come have always been
famous for both cheese and but
ter, so that without further evidence our
farmers might safely assume that the
milk was really rich in both butter and
cheese. But we have other facts. The IA
COW Mercedes, now dead, was the
especial rival of the Jersey COW Mary
Anne. of ST. Lamberts, for the honor OF
being the greatest butter COW in the
world, and the no less worthy and
scarcely less famous heifer Jamaica. is
credited as giving n hundred and
three and one-quarter pounds of milk
q day, and in a week as yielding twenty
six pounds three ounces of butter,
while Ethelka gave e%ighty-one and one
half pounds of milk a Gay. These COWS
were neither of them four years old and
with their second calves.
A breed with such possibilities, even
though the average fall far below, is
one upon which too great care cannot
be spent, with q view to both preserve
ton of these inbred qualities, and to
render them the more uniform inheri-
lance of the race.-Col. Weld of New
Jersey in American Agriculturist for
September.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
A Lesson Learned In War Time,

The soldiers learned many new les
sons in time of our late war, which
made them more consilerate, appreci-
alive men in time Of peace. Said one:
"We have all our lives been accustomed
to sit down to q good table with nicely
cooked food, light bread, and clear, de-
licious coffee, and we had regarded
these as q matter of course. It seemed
almost as if things cooked themselves.
But when we had our r~ations dealt out,
and tried to turn them into some shape
30 we could make o meal of them, we
remembered with astonishment the
good suppers of our homes. 1t was dis
couraging to pour out our coffeee and
have it come grounds foremost, and to
have our flour rations turned into book
binders paste, and burned at that"
They remembered gratefully and with
admiration the pains that wives and
mothers had taken all their lives to
make them comfortable, and wondered
how they managed to turn off so much
work with so much apparent ease.
1t has been q good, though weari-
some lesson to q man oftentimes to be
shut up in the house awhile with o
spralned foot, or some such ailment,
and have nothing else to do but watch
the domestic wheels go round. It was,
no doubt, doubly hard for the wife, but
unless he was Il very obtuse man, he
went forth to his work with n good
many new ideas about woman's work.
When a man comes in from the hot
bayfield,, and takes his dinner in the
cool, shaded dining room, which has
been well darkened all the day, he
is art to think what a comfortable
time women folk have ut work
all day in the cool house COM
pared with their work under the
June SUI A forenoon in the house,
where they can watch the hurried wife
busy owe the broiling stove, which
makes outdoor air seem cool, would
change their views. The multi
plicity of duties. hurrying on all togeth-
er in order to have the dinner in time
for the hungry reapers, would drive q
nan half insane. Most likely, added
on is the care of the little one in the
cradle, and the toddIer ut ones feet al
ways getting into the chips or ashes, if
not into the four-pan or sugar-bowl.
External vigilance is the price of safe
tv" in such a case, os we all know
who have cared for these same trouble
some comforts-the dear children, bless
them! III
After all, it is each to his own pro-
fession. The best reward q wife asks Is
appreciation, and a rIghtful share Of
the money she so laboriously earns.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
Father to his Own Father.

Munchausen, Joe Mulhattan, and all
the big story-tellers together, could
never make their most gullible victims
believe in "the man who swallowed him.
self" But in certain communities there
are irregular relationships by marriage
which creates situations similarly para
doxical and ABSURD.
do you see those two men talking
v there?" said q gentleman to q re-
porter the other day.
Eyes; those two farmers, you mean? ?"
Exactly. They are father and son."
"Well?"
"Well, their families are all mixed
up. The son is his fathers father"
How can that be"
"In this way. The old mans wife
died. In their neighborhood there lived
q widow with an only daughter. The
old man married the daughter, and the
young man married the widow. The
young mans wife is mother to the
young mans father. The young mans
father is the young mans On. The
young mans fathers wife is his mother
and his daughter Mt the same time.
Now, the old mans children
"My man, let up! I can't keep all
that in my headr" The reporter sub
%sequently learned that the above story
is q fact.-Nashville Banner.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
The Story of the Benders.

The ST. Louis Republican recently published
a story on the alleged authority of one Captain
Rivers, or Reivas, Of Appleton, Mo, to the eff
feet that the notorious Bender family were all
killed by the York party, who followed them
out of Montgomery county, Kas., when they
disappeared from there, and that he himself
went along and saw the killing dono.
Governor Click, of Kansas, %thoreupor
wrote to DR.. A. NJ York, who is now
in Des Moines, Iowa, and inquired as
to the truth of the story, and received
a reply that the article was an entire
fabrication, ip fact without even the semblance
of q foundation. DR.. York somewhat signifi-
cantly adds: "My brother, j. II. York, of Fort
Scott, was visiting mo here when the article
appeared, and we determined to take prompt
measures to trace the authorship and RESPONSE
bitity, and we will make inquiries for the pur-
pose of ascertaining whether such a person as
CAPTAIN Rivers lives at Appleton, Mo, and, if
so, we will call upon him and request proof
of his statements; We will give 5000 for
proof that tho Blenders were killed, and
connection with others. In my opinion
statements such, as the one in hand have been
put in circulation from time to time to prevent
a continuance of the search, and it is quite re-
markable that these statements that the Ben
ders were killed are revived simultaneously
with some positive movement tending 10 their
discovery. Whether there is connection be-
tween the two l cannot say, but it is q most
remarkable coincidence. Otherwise my broth
er will place the matter in the hands of our at,
torney, j. d. McChevarty, of Fort Scott, and
he will no doubt have occasion to communicate
with you"
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
A Move, Cure for shy1ng Horses.

"Does your horse shy, boss?" asked
a small colored boy of an American re-
porter who was driving along the Leb-
anon pike in a buggy. Being anxious
to know what the boy meant. the re-
porter pulled in his horse and told him
that the animal he drove had the bad
habit he referred to.
"Den l kin git you sumfin whatn
cure him for a Nickel said the boy.
The reporter handed over the nickel
and the boy produced from the confines
of his capacious pocket a small chame-
leon, evidently much the worse for wear,
but still alive. Handing it to the re-
porter, the boy told him to take the
lizard and keep it until the full of the
next moon. when it was to be boiled to
nothing in a pint of water. What
then % said the reporter. "Why you
jist take an mint (%anoint) de eyes of yo'
hawse wild it an he won't shy no mo-"
The reporter thought that the boy had
fallen upon a shrewd way to beat him
out of five cents, but he learned upon
inquiry that it is quite a we'll grounded
belief among many of the negroes who
live upon farms in this state that the
treatment recommended by the colored
boy will cure horses and mules of the
trick of shylng, and is often resorted to
by negroes living in this seetion.-Nash-
vile American. 49,.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
Velocity Of the Moon.

From the article on "The Surround.
ings of the SUM-" by Professor Langley,
in the October Century, we quote the
following: eve can family picture,
perhaps, how it would seem, from a stas
ton near the lunar orbit, to see the
moon-a moving world-rush by withs
velocity greater than that of the can.
non-bail in its swiftest flight; but with
equal speed it's shadow actually travels
along the earth; and now, if We return
from our imaginary station to real one
here below, we are better prepared to
see why this flying shadow is such q
unique spectacle; for, small as it may
be when see in relation to the whole
globe, it is immense to the observer,
whose entire horizon is filled with it.,
and who sees the actual velocity of one
of the heavenly bodies, as it were,
brought down on him.
1.-THE reader who has ever assembled
to the Superga, at Turin, will recall the
magnificent view, and he able to under.
stand the good fortune of the observer
(Forbes) who once had the opportunity
to witness thence this phenomenon, and
under a nearly cloudless sky. I per.
ceived, he says, in the southwest 9
black shadow like that of a storm abou,
to break, which obscured the Alps. II
was the lunar shadow coming towards
u.s. And he speaks of the 'stupefaction
tits his word-caused by the spectacle.
i confess he continued, it was the
most terrifying sight I eve Nv. As
always happens in the cases of sudden,
silent, unexpected movements, the
spectator confounds real and relative
motion. I felt almost giddy for a mo-
mont, as though the massive building
under me bowed on the side OF the com.
ing eclipse Another witness, who had
been looking at some bright clouds just
before, says: sThe bright cloud ]
saw distinctly put out like q candle.
The rapidity of the shadow, and the in.
tensity, produced o feeling that some
thing material was sweeping over the
earth at a speed perfectly ~frightful. ]
involnntarily listened for the rushing
noise of a mighty wind"
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
silent, then turned to him with tears il

silent, then turned to him with tears IN
her eyes.
at is because you have won my love
that what you wish can never be-" she
said simply.
Algy's heart beat fast with rapture,
but when he would have spoken she
held up her hand. II have guarded
my honor safely. It is my one valuable
possession in life; do not seek to take
it from me. The world has misjudged
me often, but the inner consciousness
OF my own integrity has made me cal
lous to its base opinion"
Glow q l resist such an appeal?s
said Algy, disconsolately. Friends, a,
least, we may be-"
She shook her head. Gle,
me go my way. and go you yours.
I am placed SO that none can help
me. Ny n fear is lest my husband
should discover my retreat. Only
yesterday he passed my window driven
by tnat woman in her phaeton."
HE is in London, them"
apparently. But possibly only
en- PEASANT. I hope so. I should breathe
freer did I know he were gone"
II will ascertain and let you know, "
said Algy, eagerly. a
They passed out of the gate and
wended their way back to South Audley
street. AS they turned into it they saw
a large crowd collected, and heard the
sound of many excited voices.
what is it?" said Nine. S%tephanie,
half nervously, and pressing closer to
her companions side.
"Some accident, I fear" he answered
quickly. "Do you stand here and lei
me go forward alone to see. You will
not be afraidl"
Her face was very pale as she raised
it to his. but her voice was steady as she
replied, mo l viii wait here"
In a second Ala was in the midst OF
the throng, eagerly interrogating. The
truth was speedily poured into his ears,
There hal been q collision, a lady's pha.
eton u%pturned. The lady was but
slightly injured, her companion was
dead; his head had struck the curb.
stone and death had been instantaneous.
Algy turned his eyes toward the
motionless figure with a strange con-
viction of the truth even before the
dead mans face was visible to him. Els
queen had nothing more to fear. He,
rightful owner lay dead at his feet.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
Don't Wait for Ripe Corn.

Colonel +. D.. Curtis, who has had
much practical experience in pig-feed-
ing, advises pork-raisers not to defer
fattening their swine till cold weather
or corn-husking time, and thus "get
them ready for market when the price
is lowest" He elaborstes his idea as
follows in The Farm Jurnal:
lit will always pay to begin to fatten
animals in warm weather; they will
gain almost as fast again. This has
been demonstrated n great many times.
and it means all the difference between
loss and gain. I know it. Any farmer
can better afford to pay the interest on
money and buy feed to push his animals
ahead IN warm weather than wait till
his corn crop is available. There is
another important fact which is q part
ct the scienoo of it; in warm weather
there is plenty of grass, or other sue
culent food to go with the grain and
so promote digestion and health, All
sech meat is better as well as cheaper.
Ahog which has nothing but corn to al
sh u SoOu pOTk as u
which has grass and other foods with the
corn. Grass is the best of all foods to
make flesh, or milk, or good butter.n
MIR. A. 3. Allen, another authority
IN all such matters, urges, in q letter to
The National Live Stock Journal. he
ginning to feed corn as soon as it reach.
es the milk state, being then highly
servlceable in Fastening the %fatteninp
OF steers at pasture. Mr.. A. s. Fuller
adds the weight of his opinion to the
same effect:
1T has been claimed, and we think
with good reason, that an acre OF corn
IN this condition will make 20 per cent.
nor beef than when fully ripe. II ia
also better to feed to young and grow
ing pigs than ripe corn, as it is iii di.
gested, as may be seen by an examin-
alton OF the droppings of animals fed
upon 1T. Farmers who have plenty Of
corn cannot do better than to begin
feeding it while it is in q s%ucculent
state"
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
How the Major Remembered the
Man Who succored Him,

The other day while Major Dodridge
was sitting in his dooryard the gate
opened and a strange looking mai hast
lily approached.
lis this Major Dodridge% .
eyes, sir"
"Of the Eighth Arkansaw during the
WARP"
Yes" beginning to look with inter-
est at the stranger.
"Don't you remember me, major?"
mo, 1 can't place you"
"Take q look at me-" showing back
his hat.
Don't remember that lever Jaw you
before"
"I am Hank Parsons!" exclaimed the
man, bracing himself us though he ex-
pected the major to rush into his arms.
Don't recall the name" said the ma
jor.
els it possible? I did not think you
would eyer forget me, I'll refresh your
memory. At Shiloh, while the battle
was raging in murderous fury, I found
you lying on the field shot through both
legs. l took you OH my back and car
ried you to aspiring in the shade. Now
don't you recollect me?"
"Let me see," mused the major, st
remember having been wounded: but l
can't recall the fact, if it be q fact. of
any n taking me to a spring"
This is indeed strange" said the
disappointed man. II looked forward
to meeting you with such anticipation
of a warm greeting. Well, well, the
world has indeed reached it's ungrateful
age. The occurrence is as fresh to my
mind as though it had taken place yes
terday. l gave You a drink of whiskey
and"-
WHAT exclaimed the major,
springing to his feet, "gave me a drink
of whiskey! O, yes, I remember now,'
Selling the mans hand, ooh. I'll never
forget that drink! The whiskey was sc
new that corn meal was floating round
on it, but we enjoyed it. Remember
youl Why, I should cavort. Why
didn't you guard against possible EN-
barrassments by mentioning some q
the main features OF the o~ccurrence?"--
Arkansaw Traveller.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
The Watermelo on.

A physician writing in Home Farm
pays this tribute to the medicinal quail
tiles of the watermelon:
II give all classes, sick and we'll, free
rein with this luscious fruit. It is more
nutr tious, pound for pound, than beef
tea O. mutton broth, besides being pure,
which the animal Stops are far from be-
ing. Gross eaters, befoulded with an
imal food and pastry gimcracks, often
find watermelon the natural cure; that
is, if in any case it has the effect to open
the bowels, it is better and safer than a
poison pill-absolutely safe, in fact
and if instead of beng ignorantly fright
ened, the person in such o case con-
tinued to eat as much of it as the appe-
tite craved, 1t would soon work q per-
feet cure. (Nothing else to be drank or
eaten for q day or two or more if neces-
sary). It cured me OF chronic diarrhna
in 1862, when d prisoner of war. I took
nothing else as food, drink or medicine
for ten days: and l find that this remedy
never fails to produce satisfactory re-
suits"
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-11-28
MIX Cure for Dyspepsia.

A lady writer in Farm and Fireside
who fed upon vegetables and fruit four
summers and each time found herself
worse off In September than in June,
finally read Of the milk cure for dyspep-
sia and determined to give the prescrip-
ton a fair test:
Gas l could not eat anything but
what would mako my stomach burn, 1
began to drink milk. I could not eat
bread in milk then. I drank a cup of
hot water morning and night, and usu-
ally one quart of milk a day, and ate
either oatmeal or cracked wheat once q
day. drank the milk just warm. The
first month / was hungry all the time.
Since then I have not thought anything
about it. gained eight pounds in four
months. had weighed ninety pounds
Tor the four years previous. Since May