The San Antonio light. (San Antonio, Tex.) 1883-1886, 1884-07-10

boiled down and thickened with cant.
Such expressions dlsgust me. Mashed
on man. indeed. There are some
women who have some self-respect left
and would not throw themselves into
the arms OF any man unasked."
assured Mrs. Grundy that dude was
an ape, not man.
THAT makes the matter worse; for
woman TO get mashed on him proves
her TO be fool. The wife must occupy
In socity the rank held by her husband,
and woman marrying fool or an ape
II bound TO doyetail Into his social posi-
ton"
"Iou talk like an oracle, Mrs. Grundy."
81 hate compliments, sir; hypocrifes
are the most profuse Of compliments,
and use them as bait TO their hooks.
Now. tell me what divorces are on
handg"
gave her catalogue Of the suits re-
Gently filed, and mentioned half dozen
couples who were living like cats and
dogs and nightly disturbing their neigh
bors by their loud and angry fussing.
That Is the way said Mrs. Grundy;
"men go home drunk, they gamble on
the money required for the support of
their families, and deserve to be marched
through the streets with placard on
their backs. But quarreling and fussing
are vulgar and low down; no decent
woman ever stoops to them, and fissy
women ruin thousands ofgood husbands.
Men want peace at home and peace
and fussy woman are like oil and water.
| tell you, II ! was Mayor the gambling
houses W ould have to close. They are
only porches TO hi, and people slide
into hi easy enough without any help.
Gambling houses have bankrupted
thousands OF families, and the bare men
ton OF them throws me into passion.
The women ought to mob them. Tell
me what causes so many fools to COM
init self-murder, and why they select
Sunday for this kind Of work?
To be honest with you, Mrs. Grundy,
| think suicide Is public blessing. ns IL
rids the world OF n fool, or n tramp or
dead beat, and resembles the pruning Of
o dead limb on n tree. But II Is impossi-
BILE for me TO explain the causes of
suicide.
The free lunches in the bar rooms are
the main stay Of tramps. loafers and
dead beats, and they should be for
hidden. Why, San Antonio is over
flowing with tramps, loafers and dead
beats, and the officers appear to be blind
to 1t. drew my pistol on tramp who
came here and was insolent, and you
would have died laughing had you seen
him running.
allow long have you resided In San
Antonio, Mrs. Grundyl"
About six years."
"Come for your health, | presume ?"
Don't be fool, young man, San
Antonio is not as healthy as n hundred
other points | could mention. If
siokly season should come along IL would
sweep Off half the population. The city
is never clearly and nobody seems to
care how much trash and filth Is tum-
bled into back yards. The trash cart
often fails to come around my street
for three days in succession, and then
when he does come he grumbles and
fuses at the quantity OF trash put out
by me.
What brought me to San Antonio, then?
/ don't mind telling you'll am constitu-
tionally opposed to having secrets, and
could not keep them If were to try
heard San Antonio required my services
to straighten 1t out-that 1t needed the
terror of what will Mrs. Grundy say?'
to reform some social evils beyond the
reach Of the law, and SO | settled here.
That Is why came"
swell, what success has attended your
efforts and labors as n social reformer,
Mrs. Grundy?"
mot very much. You can not bend
large tree, nor mend the manners Of
grown-up persons. You must deal with
the twig and the child. But what will
Mrs. Grundy say? has exerted its in
fluence, especially on the young of both
sexes. Even the fast girls fast mar
ried women have toned down great
deal. They are more afraid of me than
they are Of Satan, and not without rea-
son, for proclaim whatever Is wrong In
their conduct and manners. In every
company. Fast women consider me
an Asmodelus, or devil upon two
sticks, from whose penetrating eyes
nothing can be hid"
The best smoking tobacco Ia "Iittle