davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
The Democratic Appeal.

The National Executive Committee Of
the Democratic party, wi b headquar-
tiers at New York, has just issued fran
tic appeal for money. The terms OF the
address are calculated to excite ridlcule
rather than compassion. 1t is devoted
in large part to a denunciation of the
officeholders who contribute to the Re-
publican campaign funds, and then I'M
perfumes every body to do the same thing
for the Democratic campaign funds 1t
is set down as immoral to help the Re
publican cause but highly commenda-
bic to help the Democratic cause. Con
tributions to help elect Blaine are dis
honest and wicked, but contributions to
help elect Cleveland are sublime and
holy. money is needed" Save me,
Casslus, or I sink" eve call upon all
good citizens for the aid we require.
. Your committee invites and will wei
come contributions from every honest
man who is opposed to the election OF
James q. Blaine as President No
contribution will be accounted too
small Send by draft, check. or post
Office order" "Otherwise send by mail
Finally, the contributors are informed
that the recorded list of such contribu-
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
1t Never Can Win

There is a palpable, clear, ineligible
reason in the nature of things why the
democratic party can never command
minority of the votes of the American
people. The voters of the United States
will never intrust to it's control the adj
mmistration, of their affairs It may
continue to live along, in a deathly sort
ola way, refusing to draw its last
brsath, for a number of years, or for an
indefinite period to come. But it will
never be again the dominating party III
the country.
The democratic party is mere relic
of the past. 1t Is not a vital part Of the
present times. There is no interest IL
society, no principle underlying the gov
eminent, 40 measure relati to the
transaction of public business AID
to the general business of the
country, which forms part of
the dem cratic belief, or is in any way
associated with the existence OF the
democratic party There is no 1igament
binding the democratic party to the in
situations and destinies of the country.
1t is in no way necessary or useful to
the national welfare. 1t has no re son
for adhering to the terms on which it
continues to exist.
Beauty is its own excuse for being,
saws Emerson. But the democratic
party has no such excuse. No sufficient
cause can be given why it should seek
by any effort whatever to prOiong a
useless, causelese fruitless, and purpose
less existence This is the public vtr-
dict and Judgment. This is the record
as it has been made up in the results Of
the elections for ur-and-twenty years
a term almost eqnal to a fourth part Of
the entire period of natio al history.
In view OF this fact, no election ever to
be hell in the country here after will
show a majority Of democratic voters.
Sudh spasmodic struggles as the demo-
cratic party is making the present year
to extend it's period of active useiessnes5
may be expected, however, probably
for along time in the future. A demo-
cratic orator up in Wisconsin said the
other day that though they should be
defeated year after year for thirty years
more to come, as they have been in the
past, they still would be fighting for VIZ
tory. The sentiment was greeted with
immense demo CRITIC applause, and was
probably a somewhat accurate statement
Of a proshetic fact.
The duty of the republican party Is
simply to keep the democratic party
down. Vigilance must not be relaxed.
Labor must not be abandoned. EleG-
tons will not carry themselves. The
country still demands of the republican
party work, zeal, alertness and activity
as the conditions of success. The re-
publican party will not be in danger of
defeat az long as the democratic party
lives, It 1T does not defeat ltSef.-Cbl-
cogo Eccning Journal.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

tons will be q roll of honor" VIII c.
means that the persons who may thus
give substantial pledge to their pa ty
loyalty will have the bulge" on III
othsrc when the Offices come to De dis
tributed
1t Is difficult to date mime VII. Their
this appeal is more humiliating than
absurd or tsole absurd than it is humili-
atng 1t is a confession of the purpose
to rake and scrape throughout the
country to raise money to carry presi
dental election; in that wa V it is humih
ing. But to condemn every man as q
scoundte Ell who contributes to Republican
success, whether he holds an Office or
not. and at the same time to mike q
roll OF honor" for the distribution IL
offices among those VINO send in their
money to democratic headquarters is
manifestly absurd. The thing is as
barefaced as Chairman Barnum's former
traffic in mules; and Barnum at
least had the discretion to raise and dis
burse his corruption funa in secret
cipher The present democratic mana
gers ase apparently lost TO shame when
they propose to auction off the prospec-
tive Offices to the hi h st bidder. policy
which must delight the hearts OF the
civil-service reformers who have ab II
doned the republican party to make
common caNse with democratic black
mailers. The methods pursued by Hub
bell are respectable by comparison. =
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
Severe Retaliation.

Among the gallant's of ca aries the
Seconds days it was the custom when
agentleman drank a lady's health as
a toast, by way of doing her great
honor. to throw some part of his
dress into the fire, an example which
his companions We're bound to fol-
low by consuming the same article of
their wearing apparel. whatever it
might be.
One Of his friends perceivlng at a
tavern dinner that Sir Charles Sedley
had on very rich lace cravat, when
he named his toast committed his
cravat to the flames as burnt-offer-
ing to the temporary divinity, and Sir
Charles and t be rest were obliged to
do the same.
The poet bore his loss with great
comp osure, observing it was q good
joke, but that he would have good
one some other time He watched
therefore b opportunity when the
same party was assembled on sub
sequent occasion, and drinking off a
bumper to the health of Nell Gwynne,
Or some other beauty of the day, he
called the waiter, and ordering
tooth-drawer into the room, whom he
had previously brought to the tavern
for the purpose, made him draw a
decayed tooth which had long plagu-
ed him.
The rule of good fellowship, as then
In force, clearly required that every
one of the company should have a
Tooth drawn also, but they naturally
expressed a hope that Sedley would
not be SO unmerciful as to enforce the
law. Deaf, however, to all their re-
persaasioDs, and en-
treaties, be saw them one after an
ether put themselves into the hands
of the operator, and whilst writing
with pain, added to their torment by
Patience, gentleman, patience.
You know you promised that should
have my frolic too"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

Ellen Young Swartz. daughter of
John Swartz, wealthy resident of
Sioux City, Iowa, eloped on the goth
ultimo with Henry Styles, the family
coachman. About the same time
Swartz missed $1,000, and, thinking
the runaway couple had stolen the
money, set officers on their trail.
Southern Dakota was searched with
out success. Tuesday last Styles was
found at boarding house In Sioux
City and arrested. After an inter
view with Swartz the latter withdrew
his charges, and Styles was released.
Ellen then appeared and reconcilia-
ton was effected. The girl says they
were married at ] jefferson, D. T., by a
Justice of the Peace, last Tuesday, and
have been living In Sioux City ever
since. The bride is pretty, refined and
well educated The husband is a
clever young fellow of more than ordi-
nary ability. The girls parents accept
the situation gracefully, and will give
the couple good start.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
Disbelief in Dentists.
Conditorei des ,Jokl1s.

II viii never let dentist extract a
tooth of mine," said Holzcnbein to his
friead Schafskorf one day; "for my
brother died in consequence of having
a tooth extracted"
GLOW was that?" enquired Schafs-
kopf.
"Oh," replied Holzenbein, ''quite
natural, my friend. Why, you see at
ten o'clock in the morning he had his
tooth drawn, and for fully two hours
afterwards experienced no pain what
ever, and then he fell down three
flights of stairs, and was dead. No,
sir; no dental operations for me-"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
An sArtfui Thief.
Short stories by W. and R. Chambers.

Short stories by W. and r. Chambers.
Marie Antoinette, Queen of France,
wife of Louis XVI, was passionately
fond Of the opera.
Opposite the queens box at the
opera house one evening sat the wife
of q rich banker, bedizened with
jewels, and wearing pair of nagni-
ticent diamond bracelets. So anxious
was she to attract the notice of the
queen, that she sat with her hand On
the cushion of the box. IN order to dis
play the jewels to greater advantage
The queen cast several significant
glances at the lady, who vas highly
delighted at the attention paid to her
brIlliants
Ia the course of the evening a SER
want wearing the queens livery knock
ed at the door of the box, and, with
many compliments and apologies
from the queen, asked that her ma
jesty might have closer view OF one
of the bracelets, which every one SO
much admired Ia a moment it was
unclasped and delivered to the queens
messenger.
The bankers wife was not long.
however, in discovering that the sup
posed queens messenger was no other
than an Ingenious thief, who, noticing
the lady's evident desire to attract at
tention, had assumed the guise of an
attendant of her majesty, anel thus
obtained the bracelet.
The police were soon apprised OF
the loss, and in the morning the lady
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

A recent observer says that Denver
is not prosperous. The mining indus
try is not at flood tie. Comparatively
few mining camps are booming. The
day of speculative mining is gone also.
A hole in the ground can no longer be
capitalized for $40, 00O, 900, and eastern
gudgeons found to invest in the stock.
There are mines in Colorado produc-
ing, and abundantly- The yield Of
Leadville last year was greater than
hat of any other locality in the state.
Some of its mines will continue to
yield rich ore for years to come, but
hard pan has been reached, and only
legitimate mining will pay. The cat
tic interests becoming more profitable
in Colorado than mining, and much
capital is going into that business.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

was made happy by receiving note
from the superintendent OF police,
stating that the thief had been cap
tured and the bracelet recovered, and
requiring her to send the other brace
let by the lieutenant of police, or
bring IL to the office herself
Not caring to 60 out SO early in tho
day, she gave tho bracelet to the Off
Ger, telling him to take great care of
it. In an hour or two, however, she
found that she had lost them both.
The thief who had got the first IN
the night by personating the queens
messenger. had got the ether ia the
morning by assuming the guise of
lieutenant of police.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
Mammoth California Trees.
Santa Rosa (Cal. } Republican.

A. redwood tree in this county fur
nished all the timber for the Baptist
church in Santa Rosa, one of largest
church edifices in the county. The
interior of the building is finished in
wood, there being no plastered walls.
Sixty thousand shingles we're made
from the tree after enough had been
taken for the church. Another red
wood tree cut near Murphy's rsill, in
this county, about ten years ago, fur
nished shingles that required the con-
slant labor of two industrious men
for two years before the tree was used
I'D.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
i High" AUTHORITY.

Curran was one day engaged in a
case On which he had for colleague
a remarkably tall and slender gentle
man, who had originally intended to
take orders The judge, observing
that the case under discussion lnvolv-
ed a question of ecclesiastical law,
Curran interposed with, "I can refer
your lordship to high authority be-
hind me, VINO was once intended for
the church, though, In my opinion,
he was filter for the steeple."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
w asting Their Shot.
From lie Figaro

Rivaroles, an excellent lieutenant
general, died in 1704. He was by
birth a Piedmontese, and had joined
the army 10 France, where he was
greatly esteemed. Long before that
lime he had lost one of his legs by a
cannon ball. At the battle of Neer-
winden another cannon shot took off
his wooden leg, and threw him fiat
on the ground On being lifted up he
was found to be uniDjured, whereup-
on he burst out laughing
g The foolsr' he said wasting
their shot in that manner. They little
know [ have got two other legs in ny
portmanteaum
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
A Pert Answer.

LOUIS XI., Of France, whilst travel
ing upon the highway, Oh one occas-
ion met Carmelite bishop, wLo was
riding upon fine mule
My spiritual friend, said the mon
arch, somewhat Indignantly, lin old
en- times bishops only rode upon com
mon asses, or went on foot.
The bishop was not in the slightest
degree embarrassed, but somewhat
slyly answered the king:
Your majesty is quite right; but
your majesty lik ewise knows that IN
olden times the kings also guarded
the sheep"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

The venerable city of Newburyport,
Mass, is a5out to celebrate its quarter
miliennial, and has selected James
Russell Lowell for orator, John G..
Whittier for poet, and George Lunt
for cdist for the occasion. All three
are descendants of early settlers OF the
old town of Newbury, and Mr.. Lunt
is a native of tke Port.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

It is reported FROM Paris that expert
ments made IN the hospitals show that
sulphide Of carbon IS tae best agent to
restore the normal action of the bow
els in cases of cholera. 1t has restor-
ed to consciousness In thirty seconds
hysterical patients who, previous to
its administration, were insensiblc to
even the pricking of needles.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

A Whitehall paper calls Cleveland
e" The new Moses. He is leading us to
the promised land" Tat sounds we'll
enough for mpaiga music, but it must
be remembered that Noses didn't get
there.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16
Not Afraid of the King.
Das Buch fur Ale.

On one occasion, when the King of
Prussia saw one OF his soldiers with a
scar upon his face, he said to him..
In what public-house have they
given you such thrashing, then?'
''In one at Kollin, where your Maj
esty paid the sccre," replied the sol
der.
The King, who had been defeated
at Kollin, regarded the answer as an
excellent piece of wit from so rough a
diamond, and. smilingly, rode away.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-10-16

Senator Morgan, of Alabama; is IL
California, and bis mission is thus ex-
planned by the Oakland (Cal.) Times:
Senator Morgan Is the originator of
the idea of establishing three great
national factories-one on the Allan
tic one on the Gulf and one on the
Pacific, for the production of steel for
iron-clad ships of war and guns for
their armament. During the the Sem
ator's present visit he desires to meet
all persons who are possessed of IT.
formation as to our coal and iron su
ply, aud other facilities for such MAJ
ufact re"
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19
Sad Pate of Baltimore Belle.

Baltimore Special: The mangled remains of
q young woman were found lying upon the
side of the track Of the Baltimore & Ohio rail-
road, near Bridewell station. They were iden-
tilted as those Of Miss Mary Brannon, niece of
the late Mayor Chadman of this city. She left
Baltimore three years ago to avoid a scandal
which involved her reputation and that of a
young man named Wickersham, a relative of
one of the wealtniest and most aristocra-
tic families in Maryland. Young Wick
ersham refused to marry Miss Bran
non after he betrayed her, and she
suddenly left the city. Two years ago she re-
turned and entered upon a life of sin. She
was frequently arrested, but owing to the high
social standing Of her family she was invari-
ably turned over to her friends. Recently her
conduct became so bad that all her friends de-
serted her. Her remains were taken to the
morgue, from which her relatives will remove
them and see that they are properly buried.
Miss Brannon was thirty years old last month.
She was q beautiful brunette and a recognized
belle in the highest social circles. Wicker
sham, her betrayer, died about two months
ago after q debauch.
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19
a Flreman's Luck.

Il don't believe it," was the reply of
Engineer Frank Crockett, of steamer IL
OF the Fire Department Of this city,
when ne was aroused from his sleep the
other night by a brother fireman who
b~reathlessly informed him that he had
won 10000 in The Louisiana State
Lottery, in the drawing of the 18th
INST. What's more, / won't believe it
until l have had positive proof"
Surprising | should advance you
SloO on the strength of your chances.
Would you believe it then? ?" asked his
comrade.
Yes, / might"
The fireman went out and procured
the 800 and handed it to Crockett, who
Tor the first time began to realize his
great good luck. Then, in the language
OF a friend, he got up, dressed himself,
and tried to stand on his head in the
corner"
Crockett never had $500 at one time
before this lucky strike" said another
fireman to the reporter. "To be sure he
gets $40 a month as engineer, but he
isn't much of a hand at saving. The
ticket that won the money was No. &c.
$50, and it captured one-ffth of the first
capital prize of $75, 000."
Has Crockett received his money yet
Yes; but strange to say, he still
sticks to his job. We all thought it
would paralyze him when he heard the
news, but it didn't. He isn't a man
who drinks or CANDLES to any great ex-
tent. He is about thirty-fve years of
age and married. l heard that he in
tends to go back to New Jersey, where
he came from, and buy a farm and set
tie down"
Crockett was interviewed, but no
amount of questioning could make him
say anything further than that he
didn't care for notoriety, /" and that he
didn't want anything published about
the matter"
No. IS, $50 was the first ticket Crock.
EFT ever bought in any lottery, and his
fortunate experience adds another
scrap to to the history of lucky lottery
players in this city.-San Francisco
(Cal.) Chronicle, Nov. 26.
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19

Des Moines, Iowa, Special Telegram, Dec IL
-. j. Stuckey, secretary of the Iowa Prison
ers of War association, a member of sew eral
secret societies and an ornamental citizen gen.
orally, has depaated for parts unknown. 1t
has just been discovered that he skipped the
town about two weeks ago leaving q consider
able number Of creditors to mourn his hasty
departure. A great many rumors are current
as to the motive of his leave taking. One sto
nv accounting for his going away without say
ing goodbye TO his numerous acquaintance IS
that as a pension claim agent he ac-
cepted fees in excess OF the $lO al
lowed by law, and felt obliged to depart III
order to avoi5 prosecution for the offense. which
is treated as very serious by the government OF
the United States. There are vague and mdefi-
mite stories about other crookedness IN connec-
ton with the pension business, but inquiry at
the pension offices in the city failed to make the
rumors materialize. Mrs. Stuckey, who remains
in the city. is reported as saying that her hus-
band was betrayed by certain East side
parties; that he always refused extra pay
for pension services, bat that they urged him TO
accent as presents what he could not lawfully
take as fees. After receiving their gifts under
protest. he found that they informed the
authorities against him, and ne left nome 70
avoid being thrown in jail for an offense OF
which he was really innocent % one thing
there is no doubt Stuckey is not in Des Moines;
has not been for two weeks, and no one who
knows will tell where he is. 1t is also beyond
question that be left large number of unpaid
debts, though no large ones have as yet Gomez 70
ligbt The efforts of his creditors to secure the
PAYMENT of their claims have also developed the
fact that Stuckey was q rather liberal purchas-
er Of carpets, dry goods, groceries and other
articles which cid not SO to his family, but
which we're sent to women with whom he was
intimate. and who somehow got him in their
mower. Stuckey was an active fellow, and Q
pnshing advertiser of himself as q special
friend Of prisoners Of war, for whom he desired
10 obtain pensions. He is q man OF large
physique, rather fine appearance and genial
IA was afoat to-day. Knowing that Stuckey
was private secretary OF the president OF the
Hawkeye insurance company, q reporter called
at the Office, but failed to elicit definite infor-
nation.
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19
w. r Myers OF Indiana is thought TO be the
coming commissioner Of pensions.
II rhere ! Cure for Consumption

We answer unreservedly, yesl If the patient
commences in time the use of DR.. Plerce's
''Golden Medical Discovery" and exercises
proper care. If allowed to run it's course too
long all medicine is powerless to stay it. DR..
Pierce never deceives a patient by holding out
a false hope for the sake of pecuniary gain.
The "Golden Medical Discovery has cured
thousands of patients when nothing else seemed
to avail. Your druggist has it. Send two
stamps for DR.. Pierces complete treatise on
consumption with numerous testimonials. Adj
dress Worlds Dispensary Medical Association,
N V
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19

FoR DYSPEPSIA, Indigestion, Depression OF Spir-
its and General Debility, in their various for ms,
also as q preventive against Fever and Ague, and
other Intermittent Fevers, the "FERRo.P HosPBo-
RATED ELIxIR o C~ALIsAYA" made by Caswell,
Hazard & Co, New York, and sold by all Drug
Ing from Fever or other sickness, it has no equal.
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19
A Government Sheriff.

Mr.. Edward l. Green, Sheriff, Auckland
New Zealand, writes: 81 received an injury
TO my shoulder in June, 1882, and from that
date until July, 1882, / could not use my arm.
i applied to medical men and used all sorts Of
IMMINENT, without any benefit. l have great
pleasure in stating that | had occasion to use
st Jacobs OH for it, and I had not used IL
more than ten minutes before / felt the ben
eficial effect and ] can work with my saw or
spade as well as ever / did, and recommend it
to any one suffering pain"
The Warner weekly sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1885, 1884-12-19
voung Nrenl-Read This

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