Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1884-07-17
Uncle Billy Bundy and His Mysterious
Umbrella.

Uncle Billy Bundy and His Mysterious
Umbrella.
Ia the neiehborhood of North Ninth
street and Franklin avenue was OBJ
served, the other day. an old darby
whose hair had become almost white
from the frosts of more than sixty win
tiers. He stood on the edge of the side
walk, and was noticed to shake his
head ominously and heard to mutter a
few words as he eyed most intently a
large umbrella he held up in front of
him. Despite his apparent seriousness
there was something about the express
sion of his face that indicated there was
considera lie !un in the old fellow
''Hello, uncle, what are you thinking
about so earnestly that causes you to
stand there Ike cigar sign?' askeI
the writer, who happened along.
''Nutf'S de matter, sab, to cause anv
man what's seen heap Nv dis worril
to think de Judgment day amt fur off,
responded the old man.
He continued to shake his head,
looked up and down the street. and
then remarked: faint no use to tell
you all OATS gwine on in dis brain NV
mine at de present mint, kaze you
wouldn't bleeve it no way; an if it's
one thing what 'sturbs me more n
another, it's ter have man think I'd
say what l don't 'bleeve myself, an
specially white gemman.
''Out with it! What has happened?"
was asked,
"Well you see dis umberrella Putty
good truck in dis old rain kiver. amt it
boss? Many white man what clerks
in bank wouldn't mine totin' a UNI
berrela like dis. Deed he wouldn't.
Now den, de strange part NV what Use
tellin' you am hard ter 'bleeve, but ies
as sho' as cracklin' bread an home
made sassage is good. dis same UNI
berrella what you see, staii right here
Oh de public street for two hours an
more. whar l don lef it, an no one,
Niger ne'r white MAJ, amt tech it.
When | git home 'bolL two hours arter
Idone lef' her dar my ole oman say:
Billy, whar de name er goodness am
de umberre!la" Bless grashus, my
heart come right spang up in my moui,
kaze times is mighty hard, specially
wild homes cullud foxes let lone uar
white men; an boss, | gun ter think
dat ole pairsoll was Il goner, sho"
"You don t mean to say that you left
a good umbrella like that on the public
streets for more than two hours and
then found it, do you?''
dat what done, sab; jes so sho'
as You am standin' on yo' feet. l did
hab idea dat foxes was gittin' wuss an
wuss all de time, but de sperence NV dis
day would err upset me altoyedder but
fer what my ole oman tole me when she
herd de umberrella was safe an
SCUM"
He paused awhile, then laughed to
and proceeded: Il run jes rs
hard as my legs would low me, an
when | git here what you reckon |
seed9 A great, big, black, hungry
nigyer, wild his eyes sot
sluar on my umberrella: but, boss. dat
niger amt tech her. He ies stan on,
he did, an eyed her. an 'twant 10
p letcemen bout needer. Putty soon
here come long a young white hood
lam-l hates hoodlums wuss dan de
ole boy haze a good Christian an he
seed her sett n dar in de corn,!er, an
he look like he gwine take her, sho'.
But he stan back, he did, an he nobber
tech her. None Nv 'em amt dar' tech
her, an dat make me Iaff away down
in my BOSOM"
Strange, indeed, Old mani"
81 reckon twas strange. But my ole
oman done trickcd it, an eff YOU don't
know what trick mean, why she done
;OnIured 1t, an dat was de onliest rea-
son some rogue ant had her hist up
fore dis. My ole oman say she
lnow'd l was sich fool bout talkn'
an standin' on de str. ct
ywlne over ole times wild nv cronics,
lat in order to keep dat umberrella in
lie family she was ernlcedged to trick
/. She did dat an here de umI.r-
'clla, an here l is; an dis minnit bet
NY ole oman is la!iing to hersef While
'ile cookin supper at home"
''HOw can you trick an umbrella?"
vas asked.
snow, win you liSsen at dat?' said
he old man, as he laughed immoder-
'"N,' q Ho say III WtlitI sue uOnc IL
vid, sab; but my ole oman got de
tuff'in de mountains NV Tennessee, an
Icy she S always loaded, an dey mt
le man, rigger 'er white man, what
Sin git away wild us long as dat stuff
asts."
Before the old man shuHed off he |
'aid: BILLY Bundy is my name: |
lseter 'blong to de Johnsings in Ten
lessee; Twas in de wah wild m. marstcr.
IN now | is heah for good an all. Fl
7er want to know bout good ole times,
IN heah what | thinks u things in
nm raj. jes' you hunt me up, boss, ka G
ny ole oman thinks I'm so sharp | |
'ughter bin in Congress 'sted NV desc
'iggers what's SO mighty highforlootin',
md still doan know nuthin'. ''-.St. Louis |
Republican.
Adventures with Sharks.