The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1884-08-09

and pile your feet on the sofa and make
Yourself easy with the immortal gods,
by paying your landlady every Satur-
day and Keeping even with your tailor.
You may never be the Washington cor
respondent of society paper, but then
your hair won't turn white in the ago
nized effort to explain what it is abouta
senator's wife, who has red hair,
freckles, no upper teeth. hair wart on
her nose, and twang in her shrill
voice. that ..makes her SO be-
witchingly beautiful and univer-
sally admired" just be diligent in
your own business, and wait in patience |
for the reward of your diligence. 1t
may be little slow in coming. The
mills of the gods grind slowly. so does
a hand-organ on the LAST Rose OF
Summer" stop, but it always gets there.
And don't pay more for the reward than
the reward is worth. A man who lives
on twenty nine cents day will be apt
to die wealthy, but he won't die very
fat. 1t is the liberal soul that shall be
made fat.
AND HAVE ONE TO MIND.
Again, nv hearers, you will observe
that the exaltation is promised the man
who is diligent in business. Then
man or woman who labors diligently
for wears, until the ability to write
forty-four chapters of the Bible on
postal card does not stand before Kings
because that sort of thing isn't BUSH
ness. The man who spends all his life
irving to invent perpetual motion
machine has nothing to do with bust
ness. The Inventor" so to speak. OF
the Keeley motor will not stand before
Kings: he will not even stand before
his own stockholders. although they
have often tried to get behind him.
The man who is diligent in construct
ing one hundred and nine sentences
and three hundred and fourteen words
out of "Constantinople" will not stand
anywhere save at the head OF the
spelling class. and even there he is in
danger of denunciation and overthrow
by the s'speling re4rm acociachin."
The man who diligently educates his
feet until he can waltz an hour and
seyenty-eight minutes without stopping.
does not stand before Kings. because
ssas snow in summer, and as rain in har-
vest, so honor is not seemly for q" man
who wears his brains in his shoes.
THE SECRET OF SUCCESS.
1t seems to me, beloved, that the sue
cess of the dilligent people who stand
before Kings of various degree. is In
measure due to their successful dill
gence, and furthermore, this successful
diligence indicates the existence OF GER
tain qualities essential to success. True,
there are Captains who creep in through
the cabin windows and there are Gen
erals unfit to be Sergeants, but these
u pampered pets of unjust favoritism dc
not "stand'' before Kings; they bow
and crouch before them. But when ont
is successful in spite of adverse criticism
and sharp competition, / am inclined Il
think there must be some reason to-
his success. You ask me, for instance
what is the secret of Mrs. Langtry'
success? Well, think it is her success
But you say There are twenty girls II
Brooklyn more beautiful than she. y
don't doubt it, think there are twenty
enc. And ''they are more gifted, AM
blessed with better education?" Yes,
know that. s.And their social position
is higher?'' l should say so, m
brother. .'And they have greater his
trionic taient?" Indeed they have;
agree with you. "They can act o.
around herp' OF course, they car
"And they ought to have her place o
the American stagep" Well, then, VIII
don't they have it?
Is SUCCESS.
Verify, beloved, when people talk lik
that. and often they do, l begin to b
lieve that none but unsuccessful pei
pie succeed in this country. As
wander up and down the land l fin
about all the real talent and merit
the back seats, picking up scant
crumbs that fall from the groanin
tables of successful pretenders, Will
the sad, voiceless spirit of justice sits @
the front fence and broods with tel
der mystery over the devious ways
=. man and the uncertain favors OF fick
nd fortune and pitiless fate.
UNSEEN BLUsHEs.
lis Scarcely village do enter but Il
70 villagers proudly point ont for my ~
he miration a young man who is ''funnier
he that ever Mark Twain dared to b
rd Many of Twain's best jokes, indee'
,e they assure me, were stolen bodily fro
he Young "Funniboy." Why, he kee]
es the debating society in roar of laug
by ter all the time he is on his feet. He
nd called 1.-The Artemus Ward of Gullivs
VS. County," and the Northscestern Bur
It, blejohn has predicted for him a futu
an equal to none. have been Introduce
h in nearly every State in the Union. al
nd usually, too, in the smaller towns, son
ng distance from any railroad, to ministe
be of the gospel who could preach q
ay boots off Mr.. Beecher; who were mo
ay original. more eloquent, possessing
nut keener faculty of observation and
sss happier vein of humor and more ferti
nd and felicitous in illustration. And tn
NO resembled MIR. Beecher, too. the
un friends told me. And so they did.
,ut could see that for myself. They wo
a soft felt hats and long hair. And
ne some instances l learned that N
90 Beecher resembled and copied the v
Ain lage pastor. have met many, We
,ut many eloquent lecturers. without aut