Morning journal and courier., 1884-06-10
GRITTY.

Strawberries may be small and harmless, but they certainly have an enormous amount of Rrit.-Boston Post. 'tMy boy, where is your father tonight ? is the title of the last song. But the boy doesn't tell, probably because the old gentle man made it all right with him before he went out.-Boston Post. Deafness, it is said, can be cured by one being suddenly surprised. All physician need do, therefore, Is to whisper to patient that he doesn't intend to charge anything. Ten chances to one the patient will hear.- Philadelphia Call.
 ''What does the minister say of our new burying-ground?' asked Mrs. Hines of her neighbor. "He don't like 1t at all; he says he never will be buried there as long as he l lives" "Well," said Mrs. Hines, eff the Lord spares my life, will" gentleman bought 8 newspaper and ten dered in payment piece Of 40 sous. The newspaper woman: II haven't the change; you can pay me as you pass tomorrow. The gentleman: But suppose I should be killed to-day?" The newspaper woman: ''Oh, it wouldn't be 8 very great loss !"-Paris Wit.
 moving across 8 lake in Scotland and threat sned to capsize the boat. When it seemed that the crisis was really come the largest and physically the strongest in the party, in
 Q state of intense fear, said, ''Let us prayI" ssNo, no, my man," shouted the bluf old
 bostman; ''let the little man pray-you take the oar.''
 It is said that Ferdinand Ward passed
 his first Sunday in jail very quietly" This
 will surprise many people. An opinion wide-
 ly prevailed that he would get up on his hind
 legs and howl, and try to kick over his cell,
 and make more noise than Silsby steam fire engine in service. Perhaps he concluded not to make Rome howl until his second Sunday in nSAil.-Norristown Herald.
 Acknowledgements, dearest, as I was coming up the street, met that ugly Jack Strong. He gave me awful scowl and said if I didn't keep away from here he'd blow my brains out" Marguerite-"Oh, but he didn't mean it, Theo; he isn't such bad man as that. couldn't believe it of him. The thing is impossible" And it is from such harmless conversation as this that two hearts are wrenched asunder.-Boston Transcript.
 Depositor-"Where is the cashier2"
 Bank Boy-"Gone to Canada.''
 ''And the pretident2'
 ''Gone to South America"
 'tMercy save us But the directors, where"
 Nobody knows"
 ''Is anyone left?''
 s'Yes, me and the watchman.'
 ''Wsll, why didn't you two go also, and make g clean sweep of it2''
 ''There wasn't nothin' left when our turn came. ."-Philadelphia Call.
 Here's yer nice roast chick'n," cried au aged colored man as the cars stopped at @ Virsinia railroad station. "Hsre's yer nice roast chick'n n tsters, all nice and hot" holding his plate aloft and walking the plat form. 'Where did you get that chicken, unsIs?" asks passenger. Uncle looks at the sharply, and then turns away, ory- Ing: Here's yer nice roast chick'n, gentl mn, all hot; needn't go into de hoase for dst." "Where did you get that chicken" re- oeats the inquisitive passenger. 'Look-a- Yer," says uncle, speaking privately, 'is you from the Nort?" 'sYes." ''Is you a friend of cullud mann" 1T hope I am." "Den 1on't you nebber ask me whar got that ,hick'n. Here's yer nice roast chick'n, all aot"