Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1884-06-19
SOME CHURCH CHARACTERS
surd.ss. POINTS Out vpAo and what Ths7
Are


This said the returned missionary
10 the poor heather whom he had brongh
over, lis a church"
And the poor heather admired eh'
church. BY and by he asked:
aWho is the fatman with the big watci
seal who looks at the churches as Though
he thought some Of putting on a 90
bay window and raising the rent 500 (
year?n
aThis is a trustee" said the returned
missionary"
"He does most Of the praying, ! sap
pose?" said the poor heather, who u
his blindness, knows very little about
the way we do these things.
oSo'" said the returned missionary,
che doesn't believe in praying; he Is .
Bob Ingersoll man and he believes ina
nobody doesn't know nothing and thai
thew know that he knows that they
knows he knows they don't. He Is moi
a member OF the church, but he Is q
good, clear headed business man, good
manager, on real estate deals, n so ne
is a trustee. Doesn't take very much oi
a Christian to be a trustee, except IN
the country. In town a church only
wants a good business man for trustee.
And who is the man who stands IN
the door and glares at the people a.
they pass in and tries to keep them outE
asked the poor heather.
THAT is the sexton" replied the
missionary. "He doseu't believe IN
opening the church for religious service
at all. He SAYS the church was built &c
have swell weddings in, and that fol
preaching and prayer meetings and
other side shows of that nature the
trustees should hire a hall"
"Who is the very Young man who
pushes people out of the way that he
NAV have more room to pass IN, and
stoops very low as he enters the 20-foo'
door. and sits directly under the steeple
lest he should strike his head when he
stands up?
That" said the returned missionary
sis the new superintendent of the Sun
day school. They are all that way al
first. BY and by, when he has forgotten
every line of his beautiful speech, when
there are distinguished strangers pre-
sent. when lac has started the wrong
tune to an entirely strange hymn, and
corrected himself by striking the righ'
tune on a key so high that the chinese
Normandy couldn't ring second bass t.
il; when he has fiunked, fair, square
and outright, on the first 10 questions
in his question box, he will know les.
by a ton than he does now, and be
good, useful, earnest and humble super
ntendent. He's only young and new
ike an August persimmon."
Here comes the owner of the church,
the poor heather said. HE looks a
though he had decided to make penn
miean of the sexton aud trustee, and no
hold any service to-day"
"No, that is not exactly the owner o
the church" the returned missionar,
said "that is the leader of the choir"
who is that meek, timid little ma
who is trying 10 creep in without LETTING
the sexton see him, and who has jus
taken off his hat to the leader of tn
choir?'
''Oh, that is only the pastor Of tn
church." the returned missionar,
replied. Twill you go inside?"
And the poor heather said he would
because he rather guessed, from thei
looks, that the sexton and the leader c
the choir had made up their minds :
settle that morning which OF the tw
should take the church and run il.