The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-04-08
ANANIAS PUTNEY.

wrapping paper on the center table.
What have you got there :!
Books, said Ananias. throwing his
oyercoat into an Eastlake armchair
and kicking off his artics. It's
whole set of Gibboneses' Rome.
Picture books ? inquired Mrs. Put
new.
No; nor novels, nor hymns, nor ro- i
mances, nor dictionaries, but plain
facts-its history.
History of the war.
Well, no, YES, several wars. Madam
I'm going to start library, and this
is nucPus.
History of nucl'us, o, that will
be nice.
There YOU 90 again. I'm just
proud of YOU, am. Pm
Here Ananias broke the string with
a vicious snap. threw off the paper.
took off the cover and placed the set
where the light would strike them
favorably.
How would YOU like to know all
that's in them, Partheny?
Do you, Ananias queried Mrs.
Putney.
Don't /? Of course you won't get
time to read 'em, it isn't expected OF
you, but | can give you synopsis OF
the difficulties this man Gibboneses had
with the Roman empire. You see its
history of Rome.
Yes. how nice, said Mrs. Putney,
pounding away at the base burner and
filling il up with coal. Ananias con-
tintinued talking as though he was
addressing the foreman OF nail fac
tory.
The Roman empire was laid out by
Romeo and Juliet, and Romeo did
most of the surveying, and consequent
ly had chance to gobble on to all the
choicest corner lots in the town, which
he held for rise. This only left Ju-
liet some of the poorer and less valu-
able real estate, and it nettled him
awfully to see Romeo closing out all
his lots at high figures, and-are you
hearing Partheny?
Yes. dear, replied Mrs. Putney,
there's the baby waking up in the
next room. Just one pinute, and the
woman darted away after the child.
Confound the baby soliloquized
Ananias. Mrs. Putney returned with
tie condemned child, commenced trot
ting it on her knee, where it furnished
a full chorus for the rather discordant
solo of Mr.. Putnev.
So you see Juliet determined to Kill
Romeo at the first favorable OppOrtun
ity-darn that child-and they were
twins at that, and one day he invited
Romeo to dinner with him and con-
trived to introduce. an asp into some
kind of fruit they had for dinner
watermelons. or paw paws, or some
thing of that -dOggone that youni
one-sort, and the asp stung Rome
ON the arm and he peyanked RICH
then and there, and Mark Anthem
delivered funeral Grafton over m
dead body while it lay in the under
takers shop. Do you follow me?
Yes, dear, there's the door bell
Just hold the baby a minute, an
Mrs. Putney ran out into the hall.
1t was only a peddler, she said, re
turning and relieving Ananias of th
child which he had held upside dow
during the interval. Now what wer
YOU saving about the town lots bein
so high, or was it rents?
Is that as far as you heard, Mr.
Putnev? sternly inquired Aanania
The baby cried so, pleaded til
little woman.
But, holy smoke, woman, | can
make q bellows of myself! Can't 70
quiet that Young one
| guess I'd better carry it out
Jane, aud again Mrs. Putney evacu
ated the room. She soon re;urne
but had scarcely stepped across I'll
threshold when The bell rang again
two ladies' called and were invited int
the lecture room Of Mr.. Putne!
After few formalIties Of the seasol
Mrs. Putney remarked
Ananias has just brought hon
some new books about Rome, and
has been giving me n synopsis
them. He sar $
Here AnaDias coughed hystericall.
apd tried in vain to attract the after
ton of his wife.
He says that it is Gibbonese
Rome
Partheny, said A nanias, don't "
think the stove needs filling?
just filled it, dear, continued Il
little woman. Ananias says tn;
Rome was laid out By Romeo al
Juliet