davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16

/ Wish / Was a Man.

How often have we heard the ex.
preston, 81 wish / was a man.
coming from the sweet lips of a wo.
man. We have often asked the fair
ones why they covet such a boon.
Generally their answers have been
idle, or at least unsatisfactory. Why
any woman, 'God's best gift to poor
sinful man. should wish to be born
again, as if she were not satisfied
with her present lot, surpasseth all
understanding. Woman is but little
lower than the angel and just above
the head of man. So nearly are wo-
men allied to the angel that they might
be easily mistaken for them had they
the adornment of wings.
The rude pleasures of man are
often denied her, but this is more
than compensated for by the regal
position which she holds in the social
coterie over the sterner sex. She is
queen of hearts, and rules with her
magic wand the gift that sways the
world and bows humbled man sup
plant at her feet, slave to adora-
ton. Frail man is the thing Of the
moment, while the better half is the
mother of race of men. Woman
commands respect wherever courtesy
is denied the man. There is but one
thing better than a noble woman
and that is, two of them. Man
sweats and worries over his arduous
daily labor, trying to maintain his
his family in good circumstances.
The trouble to accomplish this not
unfrequently costs him alienation. of
pleasure and health-and even
death. How often has he fallen a
victim to the fatal drink when fail
ing to secure the comforts to his
home that are desired and the family
been accustomed to! Heaven bless
woman-she is the noblest institu-
tion of earth-but let her not wish
to be that which, being, would not
be the realization of her hopes.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16


UNDOUBTEDLY women who are not
slatternly by nature, become so on
account of the unyarying routine OF
domestic life. They lose interest in
acts continually repeated, and slight
small duties. Perhaps the house.
wife does not sweep her rooms thor
oughly today because the operation
must be repeated tomorrow; nor dust
so particularly, since dust, unlike
her coffee, has q trick of settling
often. Why should she take un-
sparing pains with food which is to
be eaten as soon as it is out of the
oven, and not by visitors, either,
who would credit her with skill? Or
why be fussy about the beds that are
to be tumbled in very few hours !
At the same time, what Is worth
doing at all is worth doing well, they
tell us. Why did she undertake a
business for which she had no talent,
and in which she finds nothing con-
genial? Is it not worth while to per-
severe in her irksome routine for the
sake of those she loves? For that
matter, is not life itself monotonous
A certain suicide made the excuse
that the routine of sleeping, dress
ing and eating-indeed, life in
oeneraI-was too wearisome for en-
durance, and so quilted it.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16
CHARLTON COURIER.
LEGAL BLANKS.

largestock of Legal Blanks for justices of tn
Peace, ,Constables, Tow nship oisers, conveyanceE
and also Miscellaneous Blanks, kept constantly Oh
hand, and for sale at Hannibal Prices. We use th
very best paper, and blanks all OF standsrt
forms such prescribed by the Statutes or
in geneIal use.
JOB PRINTING.
All Kinds Of Job Printing, from che simplest Car
toa Bound Book, neatly executed on Short Notice
aud atthevery Lowest Living Prices. IN the Latss
Styles and oTthe Best Quality. We keep mp With
the tiTas in all the designs of display Tyre,
mostapproved Prestes and defy the country or cit!
in comparison of work.
We Solicit Your Patronage.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16

'.MosT of u.s. says Matthew Ar
mold, sare what we must be, not
what we ought to be-not even whaS
we know we ought to be. -
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16

THERR is no power of genius that
can do the work of toll.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16

SAYS a wife of forty: Preserve
sacredly the privacIes of your house,
your marriage state and your heart.
Let not father or mother, brother or
sister, nor any third person, even
presume to come between you two,
or to share the joys and sorrows
that belong to you two alone. With
Gods help, build up your own quiet
world, not allowing the dearest
earthly friend to be the confident ef
aught that concerns your domestic
peace. Let moments of alienation,
if they occur, be healed at once.
Never, no, never, speak Of it out
side, but to each other confess, and
all will come cut right. Never let
the morrow's sun still find you at
variance Renew or review the VOW
at all temptations; it will do you
good. And thereby your souls will
grow together, cemented in that love
which is stronger than death, and
you will become truly one; thus do
/ pray for every married pair
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16
-l~-A-~---@~
County OMcers.
Ralfeioua.

: FEBaVExERIAN CHUKcB--Preaehing first and third
Sabbatb. Rev, 8. H. Watson, pastor, Sabbath
School overy Saebhth morning at D O'Clock. -sgffi
MErHoDIsf CHURCH (SOuth)-Rev. j. +. Shores,
pastor Services the fourth Sbbaths of each month,
morning and evening. Sabbath school every Sab
afhgoFning at O'Clock.
rrSsr BAPTIsr CHuRcH-Rey. II Barton pastor.
terviees second and fourth Sundays of each mSnth.
I. NJ i. CHURcH-Rev. p A. Crockett, pastor.
Services second and fourth Sabbatns month,
Aaorning and evening" Sabbath school every Sabbath
At p. m. l,fsf-f 14e5s,.sF- 1881 . f-f.f
sabbath at p. m.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16
ssns.,volens ana Literary.

LETTAsSnLK LIBRARH-O. +. Smith, Librarian
open from 10 i2 q. m. and from 2. to p. m.
WKRRHz LoDuE, No. "A, A. i. and A. M.-John
ehiTeFs Master; L. NJ a pplegafe, Secretary. Rsgu-
hrneetings Saturday evening preceding full moon.
CHARIToE LODGE No. III. A. o. U. WI. c..
wallace, n. w; II. II. TIsdale, Recorder. Regular
nsetinss ad aud 4th Tuesday evening at 7 O'Clock.
cKARazoS CosMEDIeAL SocIETY,--Meets the Fourth
Thursdny ID each mouth at Salisbury. ~
sRngefs K1t1uFs A. o. U.w.--Meetsl I'd and 4th
Frida1 efehinssi IN each month. J. D. Butler, 8. c.,
=. n Tisaale. n. q % & - tftks3
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16

To some kind of men their graces
serve them as enemies.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16

: NOTWITHSTANDING. much has been
said about the Importance of blood
purifying medicine, it may be possi-
Bile that the matter has never seri-
ously claimed your attention. Think
of it nowl If, by the use of a few
bottles of Ayers Sarsaparilla you
avoid the evils of scrofula, and
transmit a healthy constitution to
your offspring, thank US for the sug-
gestion.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16
State oAcers.

eiovernor-Thos. 7. Crittenden, of johnson.
Eeut.-Governor-Robt. A. Campbell Of st. Louis-
ATTORNEY -General-D. II. Mcintyre, Of Audrain.
secrstary Of State-M. X McGrath, Of ST. Louis.
STATE AudifOr-JDo. Walker, Of Howard.
state Trehsurer--Phil y. (happell, Of Cole.
Snp't Public Schools--W. 3. Coleman, OF Saline.
Register Of Landa-Robt Mccullough. Of Cooper.
ConxreSsman (this1 10th Districk-J. II. Burrows,
sests Senator (thisI 9th Districk--w. Halliburton
Judge (thisl 1ith Judicial Circuit-G. D. Burgess.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16
WASHINGTON LETTER.

From our regular correspondent.
MAY 6, 1884.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1884-05-16
GENERAL DIRECTORY.
Railroad Time Table
Courts.

Courts.
CIRcuIT CoURf-Regular terms held the first
Monday in April and third Monday In October.
fPRoBATK TKCouRT-ReguiaF termsRre held the Second
Mondays OF February, May, August and November.
COUNTY CoURT-Reguiar terms are held the hrst
Mondays In February, May, August and November
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
CHINESE RILEAL PIETT.

Abelief exists among the Chinese that,
u father or mother be seriously i'll, the
most effective way of curing them is for
one Of their children to cut piece OF
flesh out Of his own arm or leg and ad-
minister broth made of the flesh in
question to the suffering parent. This
is OF times done, but with sufficient
rarity to insure, as rule, the matter
being reported TO the throne for some
mark Of the Emperor's approval. The
Governor Of Human recently reported a
case in which q graduate named Tso
was singularly distinguished for filial pie
ty. When very young his mother be.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
A REMINISCENCE.

An account of the incidents connected
with the suppression of the Chicago
Times by Gen. Burnside, in 1858, is go
lug the rounds, in which the fanciful
statement is made that Mr.. Storey took
bundle of twenty-five papers and
climbed out upon the roof, and, by
means of the adjoining buildings,
,cached the street, with the remark that
he never lost an edition; and, also, that
the plessman took hose and declared
that he would scald anybody who should
Interfere. Anybody who knows Mr..
Storey well will not need to be informed
that he did not wait till the quarters
we're 30 close before getting copies out
Of the Office. The writer was o compos-
Itor on the paper at the time, and can
give a more accurate account Of what
took Mace on the night in question. 1t
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

was well understood in the office that
the commandant at Camp Douglas had
orders to send detachment of troops to
take possession of the establishment and
stop further editions Of the paper, and
it was known that the guard would leave
the camp about midnight. Every man in
the building knew the principal facts
the situation, and alllaboredhard atwhat-
ever work was given out. "Takes "
were short, and everything was kept
well in hand. Two men, mounted on feet
horses, watched the entrance to the
camp, and when they saw the soldiers
emerge to begin their march to the
Times Office, some four miles distant,
they made off as fast as their steeds could
cover the ground to carry the news to
"the old man," At once the order was
given to "cfose up, and in very short
time the press was running at high
speed, printing an edition of the paper
which was unusually outspoken in tone.
AS soon as small pile of papers had ac-
cumulated at any "Ay" they were
promptly seized by some one and carried
to place Of safety near by. To this
labor everybody gave willing hand, SO
that, when the guard arrived, large
part Of the edition had been printed and
conveyed out Of the building. The press
was then ordered to be stopped, and
further proceedings prevented.
1t was remarked that Mr.. Storey WIS
in an unusually spirited mood, mingling
with the men with familiarity never
before noticed. He knew the affair
would prove good advertisement for
the paper, as it certainly did. The fol-
lowing evening on immense meeting
was held in the Court House Square,
at which resolutions Hercely denouncing
the suppression were adopted. Excite
ment ran very high, and fears were en-
tertained Of counter movement against
the Tribune. That Office was bnrricad-
ed to the ceiling with bundles of print
ing-paper, and inside was said to be q
large and well-armed guard of deter
mined men. At the meeting there were
present many men who had come In
from the surrounding country, armed
and resolute, to see the Times
through" The Union League was in
session, and at short intervals received
reports of the state Of affairs in the
square from special messengers. Con-
ciliatory speeches were made, and prom
ises given of efforts to secure the revoca-
ton of the order, by means of which the
immense crowd were restrained from
violence. The next day President Lin.
coin revoked Burnside's order, and tho
Times resumed publication.-NeaDsp
per Union Monthly.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

is Interesting: Seventeen members ol
the London Society Of Composiiors
died during the second quarter OF the
current year, rs compared with eighteen
in the corresponding three months OF
1879. Their length of life varied from
% to 80 years, the total age being 75s
years, giving an average Of Al years Z
months to each. OF tho forty-one com.
positors on the approximation list, two
have died during the quarter. The
present membership stands at 5000;
showing an increase of 100 on the quar-
ter, and OF ITO since the corresponding
date Of Inst year.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
OLD MEDICAL PREsCRIPrTogs.

VIII MEDAOAA FhEoChIF1IONSs
The following are taken from "The
Young Mans Companion" published in
i723: For cholic by wind of long
continuance" Beat the lips of wild
roses (gathered in the winter) into pow
dor, and halt 80 much nutmeg; mix and
take some in your drink, and doubt not
ii cure" For corns-" Apply q piece
Of new oyled hat-case to tender them,
and hard skin" For govt or rheuma-
tism-" Take one ounce OF rhubarb as a
purge every six weeks, and apply poppy
leaves between the raisins but the con-
slant chewing of tobacco is the best, and
live OH the plainest diet and take no
strong drink, if you desire a constant
health of tho body" For sore gums
Hold alum in your mouth often III
you havo not learned to chew the leaf OF
bacco)." For heartburn" Put q
spoonful Of chalk in your mouth and
wash it down with skim milk" For
melancholy" Eat often of cream oil
!.,rtar, mixed with honey or treacle
shun all musick meetings, and media.
tons on Christ's sufferings for all sin.
ncrs, that they might hate us; for To
live III the fear OF God causeth continual
iy (Gal.s22). Then nothing brings sad.
noss to the heart (but sin) prov. XIV.
lO"
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

A CLERGYMAN past middle age, afteS
having united couple in the holy
bonds OF matrimony, was asked by some
present at the marriage feast how he, a
bachelor, could consistently engage in
such ceremonies The good mans an
swer was significant: In mans life
there are two periods when he is likely
to marry-one when he is young and
has no sense, the other when he is old
and has lost his sense. He was glad to in
form them that he was rlst one and had
not yet reached The other"
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

came seriously III, and, believing that
Heaven could prolong his mothers liF,,
by shortening his quite Chinese be-
lief, he refused food, and spent night
IN sppplicating it to that effect His
mother recovered, but, some years Inter,
In 1873, she was attacked with q fatal
disease, which he tried to countcract by
cooking her some broth made out OF his
own fesh-cut from the muscle of his
arm. Unfortunately, not only did the
mother die, but the brave sou never re-
covered from his self-inAicted wound,
and he died in the following year from
its effects. The Emperor decreed him
handsome monument,-TempIe Bar.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

A YOUNG woman, rather preposscssing
in appearance, but possessed OF con
siderable growth OF beard, is once y
week visitor to barber shop at Gin.
ton, Ga. She takes her seat in clair
just like man, and quietly submits hrr
face to the lather-brusll and n,zo,
Showmen have tried 10 induce her I.
travel as a bearded woman, bat sh,
scornfully rejects their offer.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
ARIsToCRATIC OILERS.

The men who do not work and yet
i've on the fat of the land, says New
York correspondent, are constantly in
,reasing in New York. lido not refer to
.he clever fellows who pick up all sorts
Of odds and ends by their wits, but to
the high-toned oilers along Fifth avenue
and thereabout, who toll not, neither do
they spin, and yet dress in the best, and
Esir sumptuously every day, chiefly ct
The clubs. Most of them are the sons OF
lnen who laid up fortunes by just as
inrl work as any Of our busy merchants
are doing now. The fortunes were put
into real estate or some other form of
permanent investment, and now yield
handsome annual returns. We have
landlords in New York whose rentrolls
inn from $50, 900 to $50, 900 year, and
la some cases to 500, 900. These, I
need hardly say, are exclusive Of the
Astors, Goelets. and other heirs to enor-
nous estates. We have scores Of very
rich men, beside, who made great fort
Lnes in trade or by speculation, and who
.lnk as millionaires, though their names
are not often seen in the papers. As o
rule, the sons of these magnates, of the
first class and the second, have no incli-
hntion to work. 1t was enough for their
fathers and grandfathers to do that.
What they live for is to have good
t.mo-to dress OF the top Of the fashion,
drive fast horses, be hail fellows well
lnct with the nabobs Of the clubs, get
Invitations to stylish dinners and recep-
lions, and in a general way copy the
manners and dress Of the English aris-
tocracy as closely as possible. A good
deal has been said from time to time
about the growth of a privileged class in
Now York. The class is very large
rne, and it includes another class, which
may be called the community of aristo-
cratic idlers. AS families acquire large
wealth, and set up in the fashionable
world, this class steadily increases. Our
friends, the Communists, dislike it
greatly, and would like to pull it down,
Int it keeps on growing, and will con-
tinue to do so. Its existence is, no
doubt, one of the inevitable conse.
quences of the accumulation Of money
i'll individual hands.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
ANGRY WITH THE HOTEL CLERK

ANGRY WITH THE HOTEL CLERK.
An amusing scene lately occurred NJ
the st. Louis Hotel, in which staid
and solemn member Of the press" was
the chief actor therein. The "member"
in question is an eccentric individual,
who has the worst eyes that ever pre-
tended to discern the punctuation of a
sentence. He was always half blind,
and now he is more than three-quarters
so. Being anxious to see an aquaint-
ance who was staying ut the st. Louis,
he went about 7 o'clock yesterday even
ing, anticipating no difficulty in so sim
pie matter. Ascending the first flight
Of stairs, he halted before the clerks
Office, and, not knowing the number OF
his friends room, politely requested to
have his card sent to Mr.. Blank. The
clerk bowed politely, hut said nothing.
81 wish you to have my card sent to
Mr.. Blank" said the visitor.
The clerk looked astonished, but said
nothing.
"Why don't you answer me" asked
the journalist, in an excited manner.
The clerk grew more wrathy in up
pearance, but continued as mute as a
mummy. A
"Well," said our friend, "you are
certainly one OF the most thoroughbred
Doors l ever met, and require little
delicate chastisement quite as much as
any prococious boy of the Faubourg."
The thing was becoming really I'M
pleasant. The silent clerk stood grave
ly facing the angry stranger. There
was pause Of a few minutes duration.
At last happy thought struck oul
friend, and muttering to himself, "He
does not know English" said, "Par.
donaez, moi, monsieur ?"
The clerk bowed politely, but still
said nothing.
"Pourquoi," said cur friend, in his
broken French, "pourquoie ne partes-
Vous 2"
But the inAexible clerk would enter
into no parley. The visitor was making
up his mind for serious mischief, and
scientifically turning up his sleeves as @
preliminary, when it occurred to him
that, impolite as the clerk assuredly
was, he was too good-looking fellow tc
intend an insult 10 one who had done
nothing to provoke him.
AT this moment an old gentleman
sitting near, who had evidently been re-
pressing his laughter for some time
burst into an uncomfortable guffav
which almost shook the hotel, and al
the walters, catching the contagion
threw up their heels and fell back il
that state which is called in pictur
esque Celtic, Irregular kick Of laughter.
This caused the half-blind editor t.
look round, when, 10 his great dismay
he discovered that he had been address
ing, not the clerk, but himself There
is looking glass in trent Of the clerks
office, which seemed to him to be thu
usual rectangular opening in such places
and the handsome clerk he had been Sc
wrathy against was his own reflection.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

Take care of your Liver. A great
of the diseases to which
mankind are liable arise from disor-
dered condition of this organ. Keep
it in a sound and healthy condition
and you can defy disease. PRICKLY
ASH BITTERs are especially adopted
for this purpose, being composed of
drugs which act on the Liver, giving
it tone and strength to withstand
malaria.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
Our Agents

The following persons are our authorized
agents, who will receive subscription. for the
SEMI WEEKLY SOUTH KENTUcKIAN:
j. W. Williams, Pembroke, Ky.
W. b. Brewer, Fairview, Ky.
Il. L. Mcclure, Trenton, Ky.
JIM. Adams Il Co., Church Iill,.k
L. d. Hancock, Casky,l Ky.
}. C. Marques, Pedee, KY.
Mrs. Gertie |. Griffin, Lafayette Ky
ID. j. Faulkner, Caledonia, Ky.
W. A. White. Macedonia, Ky.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

THEY have an expeditions way Of pay
ipg OF the employees of the Hudson River
r"ilroad. The paymastor goes over the
road, paying out $500 in grOenbacks
and gold. The train runs at its highest
speed, and the pay of the tlagmen be.
tween stations is put in envelopes, and,
attached to sticks, is thrown Mt the yari-
sls hagmen as their shanties are
PASSED.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
TRENTON, Aug, l, 1881.

TRENTON, Aug, l, 1884.
Mr.. p. f. BACON,
The Liver and Stomach Pad, made
by DIR. Williams, of Brooklyn, New
York, that | bought of you, l have
worn some five or six weeks, with
very good results, and | cheerfully
recommend the same TO anyone afllict-
ed with Liver or Stomach troubles.
ALBERT HUGHLETT.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
CLUB LIST.
10 CORRESPONDENTS.

We want fresh, reliable and readable letters
from every neighborhood where the SEMI
WEEKLY SOUTH KENTuOKIAN circulates. Give
rs the news plainly, correctly, briefly and intel
lgiby, without needless comment or rhetorical
,lourlshes. Let no. obituary notice exceed ten
lines; don't discuss the weather, or write abou
matters OF no interest to the reading public
Use but one side of the paper and write as often
IA you have news items to chronicle, AMI no
uftener.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
Reader, Attention if you Please!

| have nothing to say against any
one else, neither against their rene
dies or systems of medicine but | do
say from personal experience as well
as from observation that DR. Will
liams' remedies which | sell can't be
beat in Liver and stomach troubles,
Dyspepsia. Bronchitis, Catarrh, Kid
ney and Bladder ailments and uterine
troubles, also chills and malarial dis
eases generally. Come along FELLOW
CHRONIC. Buy and get relief. Prices
.O), 800 and $500.
P. L. BACON,
Hopkinsville, Ky.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10

THEIR are so many inventions that
"cannot get out Of ORDER" and twill
last lifetime, that anybody who shall
discover something that will get out Of
order, and will only last long enough tc
be carried home, will supply q long-feli
want.
Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1884-10-10
Lock 50 rTrtiiv,

Nothing looks more untidy than the
presence of scurf and dandruif in the
hair and on the clothing. One bottle
of Parker's Hair Balsam will heal the
scalp and free it from this nuisance.
Stops falling of hair, promotes new
growth and makes it soft, glossy and
silky. Best addressing. Deliciously
perfumed.