davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

"DrD you hear Of that man down
town who married two women in one
day p asked Fogg at the tea table the
other evening. Isn't it awful r. ex
claimed the laudlady. "Dn tell US all
abnut il, Mr.. Fngg." "0h, there isn't
much to tell replied Fogg; you
know him we'll" II know him the
villain !" shrieked the landlady. Don't
say that, ma'am," said Fogg. southing.
ly "don't say that. Ii was the Rev.
Mr. TexiuaI, your beloved pastor. and
he wouldn't like TO hear you talk so
about him. And by the by. he mar
ried the women to as two likely young
fellows as there are in town" The
landlady says she never could bear
that Fogg.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

"WHERE are you taking me to n
asked u criminal. addressing the lie.
iective, who had just arrested him. Il
am taking you 10 the oifice." was the
reply. Il with to observe In this case.
then" said the culprit. "ihHt II Is the
Office seeks the man, and not the man
the oiIice.'
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

A FARMER went tO hear the great
Wesley prpach upon the subject oI
money. Get all you can" ssid Wes-
ley. The farmer was delighted. "Save
all you eau" The farmer was still
more delighted, and thought We-ley
the most practical preacher he hpd
ever listened TO. ''Give all you can" I"
Atihis the farmer exclaimed: "Pshawl
He has gone and spoilt il all"
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03
Could Afford It.

Mrs. B. There, Just as expected /;
Mrs. ID. has a new sealskin sacque.
She has been getting new things right
straight along ever since her husband
was elected to office" Mr.. B.-"WelI,
she can afford To. Her husband has
hig salary, aud no end of perquisites." :"
Mrs. B.-"Then why in the world
don't you get elected to something ?
Why don't you go TO the political
meetings, show yourself, make speeches.
aud work up what the papers call
boom =" Mr.. Bit would not du.
my dear. 'Boonis' are played out now
| have better plan than that" Mr-.
B.-"Great plans you have! All you
du is to loaf around the house oil the
time, and you cont even stick your
nose out Of tho door without watching
tn see if anyone is luuking. Isuppnse
you will I've sneaking 10 aud out the
hack way next" Mr.. B.-"Hist Not
80 loud. You have bit IL exactly.
Can't you seeg am. in training for u
dark horse '"-PhiLt. Cti.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

Two young married French ladies
were talking ahout their husbands.
Said one "f them, Do you really think
your jules went shouting Yesterday ~
We'll, | dom. think he tried Ia dc.
ceiye me yesterday | am inclined to
think he went But he d dnt bring
hack any gamer" Thar what makes
me feel sure he did 60 !" was the wife's
reply.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

4 ogSTLEMAx met an uncertain
acquaibIance. who said "I'm y little
shut aAd should like to ask you
cOnundrugl 10 mental afilhnletic.'
"Pfoceeti.D replied the gentleman.
"Well." said Ihe short man, suppose
yon had sI0 in ysmr pocket, aud !
sh0. III ask sou fr So. How much
would rrnin.yg Zen dollars" was
ihe prOmpt'reply.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03
AHrAITn iournaI says, 400 lbick

AHEALTH journal says: "Too thick
undertaking causes unnatural red
ness ia The faceand nose" We never
heard it called that name before. Per.
hHps If The editor Of the hath jour.
nal was 10 dilute his understanding
with little water beiore swallowing Il
the unnatural color would not mani.
fest itself 50 prominently.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

SOMETHING MoRE UsEFUr.-."I say,
Matilda, snarIed Mr.. Pumgranate,
can't you do something more useful
than to study The fashion journal p
well, yes answered Mrs. Pom.
granate, Il was just thinking that 1
could do something else"
And what is it, pray ?"
Il will dress According to it, If you
will allow me the money"
"l have already ma e enough allow
auces for yonr vanity aud frivoli'y," ="
was the brutal reply OF the Austin
husband.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

WHrLEthe arrangements were being
made for a party = few evenings ago,
a young lady present innncenlIy in.
qiHTcsl. rs the invilat on to embrace
the young ladies :" "oh, no." replied
q tunng man. "the gentlemen will at
tend 70 that" And the young lady
wonders what the young man meant.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1884-01-03

MUcH of . young name success n
life depends On bic selection Of : father
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
AOETHEMELn.

". E. Kasson drew a prize last week; (What is baby worth ?
 Mrs R. Shaver and Mrs A. Cook were here from Lee, last Saturday.
 H. Cady, wife and daughter, were here from Winsted, last Sabbath.
 I. R. Baldwin started on his four months trip, the 2d inst H. L. Barber also started on his trip the first of the week.
 Mir Cargill from Newark Valley, NY. with wife and daughter, also few friends went to Lake Buel to view the grounds and lake, last week and report good time.
 ". R. Baldwin, also Mrs A. II. Ben. edict and daughter went on the excur. sion to Bridgeport, last "Wednesday, and although the day was rainy and unpleas ant, a good time was enjoyed.
 The frost on Wednesday and Thursday nights of last week has not been beater for many years-many gardens and field, will be replanted, and we presume les. work will be required to gather the ap pies, grapes, and other fruit, both sum. mer and fall
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
NOR FOLR.

Messick & Cone have launched a new sign, which is very neat.
 Miss Sybil Carter spoke Sunday A. NJ. and evening, being extremely interest ing each time; the church was exception ally well filled.
 Memorial day passed off quietly, the services being about the same as usual. Mir E. l.. Gaylord, chairman of the flor al committee, deserves a hearty vote of thanks for what he has done in that branch. Not only has he spent time himself. but opened his house Thurs day evening, for an assembly of 35 will ing workers to prepare the wreaths, flowers, etc. for the following day, which is not light job, but was neatly and quickly done, but his estimable wife, however, was not satisfied till she had refreshed the weary mortals with cake and strawberries, of delicious variety, so instead of being tiresome task for a half dozen or so as usual, the work was made light by many hands and af- forded pleasant time for all. The trimming of the church was elaborate and beautiful, under the supervision of Mrs Ives and Mrs Gaylord. The trim ming of the monument in the park sur passed anything in the past, and was ar ranged by Miss Cone and Miss Crissey. Winthrop H. Phelps of New York, de- livered an appropriate address. The drum corps was out and did splendidly, sur. prising every one by their advancement during two months practice; it is evi, dent they mean business and, although the town is pretty well drained of late, money wise, would 1t not be well to help the boys little about uniforms, etc. Arrr,un-nrr,
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
PAID ALL LOSSES IN FULL

The last year was an exceptionally disas- trous year to tobacco crops, and the losses were many and great, but they have all been promptly paid.
 This only shows the importance of insuring against these losses Many thought last year they would not insure, and would thus save the small premium, but one day the hail came and beat upon the crop and they lost ten times the amount ofthe premium.
 At the last annual meeting it wns voted to substitute for the premium notes cash pre-. mium of five per cent, the officers and mem- bers of the company being satisfied that that will meet all contingencies, Anyone insuring therefore for the current year, will orly be required to pay cash premium of five per cent on the amount of the insurance, which will cover all liability, can be
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
coRREsPoNDHNcE.

Rs- CORRESPONDENTS are requested to send in their communications so as 10 reach us on Monday of each week. as we cannot insure the insertion of any correspondence receivedafter that time.
 RJ- Write only on one side of the paper and send something each week if possible. Don't wait until you can gather a full column to send "all at once, but let us hear from you from week to week. if you can't give more than two items at & time, remembering that netcs is not improved by age.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
SAILS BURY.

Decoration day was observed here with marked interest. About 30 vete- rans were in the procession, headed by as many little girls with flowers. A quartette with melodeon sung fitting pieces. About 30 soldiers sleep in the Salisbury cemetery. Capt Bates was marshall of the day, who announced each name and then two of the little girls stepped forward and placed tho flowers on the grave. The citizens turned out in large numbers, the three Revs, Evans, Reid and George among them. The simple drum beat brought tears to the avaS
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
DIED.

STEwART-At Goshen, May p, Miss Sarah Stewart, aged 70 years. THoMAs-At Harwinton, May 23, David Thom- as aged 80 years. SrEvENs-At Norfolk, May 30, Desiah H., wid- ow of Hslsey Stevens, aged so years. HoLLEY-At Niagara Falls, May 30, Caroline E.C. Holley, wife of the Hon G. w. Holley, and daughter of the late Chief Justice Church of Connecticut. She was in the 18th year of a we'll spent life which adorned a Christian profession.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
G. w. sCOVILLE, Furnishing Undertaken

And dealer in Baskets, Cofins, Burial Robes and all kinds of Undertskers' Goods. The mor approved methods known to the profes- sion dsed in preserving the dead.
 Cabinet work, Upholstering, and Repairing promptly and thoroughly done.
 Agent for Nj. G. Wheelers cut fiowe'
 Residence and shop on the ''Green, Norfolk. Conn. s5tf.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
SAD DEATH OF AN OLD SOLDIER.


 John Masner, in the employ of Robert Pendleton, was found dead on Sunday evening under sad circumstances. A lady riding past notified the family of his employer, that she believed a man lay dead under shed on their premises Dr J. J. Averill, medical examiner, was summoned, who will make a further examination into the cause of his death. It is supposed he died of poison, as a paper of Paris green was found lying by him, and another on his person. "Dutch John" as he was often called, had lived number of years in town, and at two different times, accumulated some money and on both occasions he was wronged out of it by the dishonesty of others. He had drawn pension ever since the war, until the last few months, when the person having charge of his pension papers had lost or mislaid them. This last misfortune increased his dis. pondency, to which he was liable, and he had been drinking more of late. All day long on Sunday he lay alone, neg lected, dying and the close of the bright summer day found him dead Homeless, friendless, and alone, he ha: oone to his last aecount
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04

All liver and malarial diseases cured by Rice X Co.'S eclectic pills. Formulae May apple, ext dandelion, aloes, ext. colocynth comp. and oil anise. Price 25 cts. Gelatine coated. For sale by Gee T. Johnson, licensed pharmacist, Nor. folk, Conn.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
BORN,

BEARDsLEY-At Norfolk, May 23, daughter, (Alice Theodoral to Theodore II. and Aura Beardsley. GoRDoN-At Sharon Valley, May 23, daugh- ter to c. c. Gordon. LuMBERT-At Mill River, May 16, daughter 10 Edgar J. and s. Frankie Lumbert.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
SOUTH CANAAN.

The Rev Mir Moore has been absent for two weeks on vacation. The Sun day school and prayer meetings have been we'll sustained in his absence.
 We have been visited by the heaviest and most ruthless frost in the memory of the oldest inhabitant. On the night of the 29th there came " cruel frost |" which cut off all the early vegetables and injured if not wholly distroyed all pros poets of fruit. It was not only frost but freeze, as ice was formed to some depth. Hardy shrubs and even forest trees were blackened as in the late fall.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
/. CHARLES D. BLINN, :. Col. of 18th Conn. Vols, {: Born Aug. 26, 1940; Died Nov.4, 1883

In smaller lettering appears, Erected by the New Milford Choral Union, in Memory of their Leader" The grave was then strown with many beautiful floral decorations in choice and exquisite designs. MT H. s. Mygatt in an ad- dress full of tender and loving re- membranes of the Col, and of sympa- thetic feeling for his family, presented to them the monument in the name of the choral union. MT s. s. Green, a brother-in- law, in well chosen and heart felt words, accepted for the family this offering. Rev Mir Thrall of the Congre- gational church then gave an earnest and soul-stirring address suitable for the day and occasion, followed by Longfel- lows poem, the Battle of Life, sung by the choral union, prayer by the pastor of the Methodist church, and singing by the crowd, My Country 'tis of Thee, " closed the ceremonies at the grave. i Upton post, accompanied by large company then marched around the cem- etery, which is beautifully laid out and highly ornamented with evergreens, etc, distributing their profusion of floral emblems on the graves of fallen com rades. The varied exercises of the day were full of interest and profound in- spiration.
 COLEBROOK.
 An infant child of T. $. Skelton, ten days old died Saturday morning.
 Mrs Hattie Andrews of Hartford is visiting at the Misses Darlington.
 Hon John T. Rockwell was in town one day last week calling upon friends.
 Mercury stood at twenty-eight degrees Friday morning and early gardens are ir ruins.
 The Smith farm at the Center ha: been sold to Mir H. Lansdell of Brook lyn, N. Y.
 MT Goodenough ofWinchester, preach ed to us last Sunday in exchange with Mir Hartshorn.
 Mir Timothy P. Coy lost nice year ling heifer last week, with disease sup posed to be murrian.
 Mir Orin Oles and F. D. Thompson were both seriously ill last week but were little better ct last reports.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
trAyr CANAAN, uoiNo borrni

 a.34 A. m. arriving at Bridgeport at I2.l5 De m, with through car for New fork, arriving al 2.I5 D. m. ut Now Haven ht l.lt ?. m. 3 co P. m,, arriving at Bridgeport, al 5.20 D. n., with through car tor Now York, arriving at 20 p. m. al Ntw Haven at c l2 D, m. 3.05 D. m. Milk Train, arriytng in Bridgeport, at 7.35 ?. m,; at New York. l0.8Q D. pia at New Haven, ln.b0 p. m. C S5 p. m. for Falls Village arriving Rt G.5U D. m Sunday Milk al 10 P. m., arriving in Bridgeport At 7s0 D. m. New York, in.90 p. m.. New HA. ven, 12,30A. nj. Connect at Drookhuld Junction with trains to and from DanburY.
 W, II. YEoMANs. supt. II. D. AyERIf.L,
 General Ticket Agent,
 General oniooa, Bridgeport, Ct.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
Ne,o AdgeTtiSemeRtS. Tobacco Insurance. "The Tobacco Growers MUTUAL INSURANCE COn " North Canaan, Ct.. Insure all Tobacco against Loss
 or Damage by HAIL.

The Company was chartered by the legisla' ture of Connecticut in 1880, and has been doing business for four years.
 It has fully met the object ofits organization and has in each year
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
ooNa WEST TRAINS LEayH oApa1l

Commencing May II, 1884
 ootNa WEST TRAINS LEANR CANAAN. l0.gS m. for Rhintboek connecting with
 the Chicago Exprcsa, the Express for N,
 Y. aud Day Boats for New NuFk and
 Albany, With U, X D, Railroad
 for Catakil MunntH1nR, with
 Walkill Wiley Railroad and the N. Y..
 W. $. X Buffalo Railroad I2. .40 pm. for Rhinobeok, connecting with trains
 on the N. Y. G,& II, II. Railroad, 9.50 P. m. Connecting from hittsnela. Al Mils
 lertonfor Now York. arriving atH,A0 D. nl.
 Leaves Salisbury at A.i5 and Lakcvills
 at 4.23 p. m.
 Rhinebsck with the st Louis Express on
 the N. |. c. X II. R. llailrood. 320 p. m. Milk Tram, connecting at Milltftoh
 for New York arriving Al 7.lo p, m, Runs
 Sundays unlyt
 GOING EAST. TRAINS LRAyE CANAAN, a.bs A. m. Connecting at Winated for Watei
 bury and Bridgeport. Al Simshury foI
 Mostaold, Northampton, Vii.
 iiamsburgh and Holyoka, AtHartfotd
 with Express for Springfield and Boston,
 aud all points North and East; arriving
 in Boston at s,S0 p. m.; and for New
 Haven, arriving at 1,2s p. nj. also for
 Milhmantic, New London. Providence,
 NaW York.
 Leaves Millerton at s.bo, Lskeyills p.U7 Salisbury g.iA .. m. A.52 p, m. connecting at Ninatcd for Water. bury, Bridgeport at simsbufy for West. field and Holyoke; at Hartford for New Haven Springfield and Boston, s.ih p. m. Leaves Millerton at 7.26, Lakcyliis 7.As, Salisbury 7.5a ?, m., for Winated Passengers leave New York al 9.60 D. m. connect with this train. | sos D. m, tsundays only.l Leave Mtilortop for West Winatod, arriving Rt 6.I2 p. n. Tickets sold and baggage checked through l to Albany, Buffalo. Chicago, St LcuiH and the | West. Western passengers make but one | change,
 JNU. F. JONES, Superintendent. WALTER PEARCE, Genl Ticket sRent
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
HEROISM RECOGNISED.
HWNORS TO PATRIOTS WHO
 FOUGHT FOR THE UNION.

North Canaan Remembers KAer Mar- eyred Sons --- DecOrates Their Graves and Accounts Their Noble Deeds--.Tears for ehe
 Dea6.--A imd " orsis SpOk-
 em tO ahe Living.
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04
TFaeeleT'S s Guide.
uousAToNIc RAILROAD,
SPRING ARRANGEMENT sa.... d. sfs..s kfzs. so sbpE

Taking effect May i2, 1881. Through Tickets Sold and Baggage Checked
 from Canaan for tha West, rAssENUEu TRAINS LEArK CANAAN, aoiNa KuHrm I2.31 p. m, Arriving Rt rittstield Ht 2.o5 D. m. With through car from Bridgeport for Albany. arr yirR Et lb0 D. m. Connecting st Albany with inst express. arriving in Chicago al 500 tho uuNt P m. Train arrlNep in Saratoga Ht els ? nj.
 7.52 D, m Passenger Train, aInyinE at pitfshelu ht 0.2a p. m. Connecting nt State Ldne Tor Albany and the West. hts irving at Albany al lo.05 D. m.. sarAtoRs al tt2.b5 night.
 COB a. m. speeipl arriving Rt pittshald, At 7.i2 arriving iu North Adams a.OQa. m. Albany g,26 T, m,
Connecticut western news., 1884-06-04

uAWTE0Hn N CONN. WESTERN A1 GIAIGsMOAD. Runs from Hartford to Rhintbeok on the Hudson river, where tt connects with
 the N,A, C. IA. R, Railroad.
 NammpurinR May H. 1884
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-10-16
The Telltale Hat.

ga charming morning, Mr.. Robin
son, said dapper bunco steerer to a
we'll known Chicago lawyer yesterday
morning, in the vestibule of hotel.
SIT is no use, my fine fellow" replied
the Chicagoan, ST can't be had"
The steerer apologized and turned to
go.
"Stop," said the lawyer smilingly.
81 am of an inquisitive turn of mind.
Do you see this so note? 1t is yours
if you will tell me honestly why you
picked me out as a stranger in the city. "
The bunco man took the bill and
whispered, at is your hat. You laugh,
but it is fact. There is no better indi-
cation of where man is from than his
hat. Come to the steps here and watch
the people as they pass. See that well
dressed man with the silk hat with a
very narrow brim. Well, where he
comes from thathat is the fashion. It's
an old style here, but new one where
he lives. That man is an American,
but he has been living in the West In
dies. That stout man there with the
extreme broad brim is from Detroit or
Canada. We can always tell a PhiIa-
delphian from the provincial cut of his
clothes and Boston man by his accent
But mans hat is the surest telltale of
the lot. So long. "-Neac York Herald
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-10-16
Neither Coal nor Wood Wanted.

Not pound OF wood or coal Is con.
sumed at Creighton, twenty miles from
Pittsburgh, where the Pittsburgh Plate
Glass Company have their plant. Glass
factory and Residences are heated and
lighted by natural gas. Gas Yves struck
at ], 200 feet In five inch bore. A tor
rent Of what the owners describe as
pure nitrogen gas" bursts out with a
force Of $50 pounds to the square inch,
and after three years 10 flowing with as
much energy as ever. The visitor sees no
coal, no wood, no cinders, no ashes, no
smoke. In the furnaces is a lurid,
steady heat regulated by clock-work.
No grimy stoker sweats his life away at
furnace doors, but instead calm per-
son with stained glass shield invites
you to look at the glass through the
open furnace doors, where glares heat
sufficient to deter modern Shadrach,
Meshach and Abednego. Overhead gas
burners are ablaze in broad day, because
it Is not worth while to take time to turn
the burners off and on, as there is plenty
of gas and to spare. In the residences
a. thumb.screw regulates the tempera-
ture to absolute perfection.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-10-16
Miss AstOr's Wedding Dress

A Paris letter says: Miss Astors we'd
ding will take place in New York about
the middle of November. Her wedding
dress is now being made in Paris and
will be sent over about the LIST of No
vember. 1t is to be of very heavy pearl
white satin, made with full princesse
train, which will be bordered by plisse
of the satin and ON the edge a ruching
of fine point lace in wild-rose design.
The front is to be covered with ruffies of
rare point lace that belonged to Miss
Astor's grandmother. The lace will not
be cut, but will cross over in fiounces
and at the sides will be caught down in
twist and held by cluster of orange
blossoms and pearls. The corsage will
be cut square and bordered with the
lace, while the sleeves, slightly pulled
on the shoulders and reaching to the
elbow, will be met by long white kid
gloves, which are being made to order
to fit the slender little hand of the
bride. The slippers are to be of the
dress materials and embroidered in
white pearls, while the stockings will be
of the finest white silk. The veil will
probably be of illusion. There is a rare
old point lace veil in the family, and
this may be worn, although tulIe is
more becoming and preferred by the
bride,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-10-16
Girls That are LOyable.

Girls without an undesirable love of
liberty and craze for individuaIism
girls who will let themselves be guided;
girls who have the filial sentiment well
developed, and who feel the love of a
daughter for the woman who acts as
their mother; girls who know that every
day and all day long cannot be devoted
to holiday making without the inter-
vention of duties more or less irksome;
girls who. when they can gather them,
accept their roses with frank and girlish
sincerity of pleasure, and when they are
denied, submit without repining to the
inevitable hardship of circumstances
these are the girls whose companionship
gladdens and does not Cypress or dis
tract the old, whose sweetness and
ready submission to the reasonable con-
troll of authority, make life so pleasant
and their charge so light to those whose
care they are.