Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1884-10-13
BRIGHT BITS.

WHEN man is 20 he calls her rtle-dove,
and " hen he is 40 he thinks Of her as snap
ping turtle doye.-Sdn Francisco Post.
81 LOVE the ground you walk upon"'
The sutton fervently wrote IL down;
" hch was not strange, as she dlu own
The major portion Of the town !-Jef. Jostyn.
ssTHIs is the line Of argument which we
shall use to-day" remarked the lawyer as he
got out the fishing tackle, and picked the
dried worm off the hoOk.-BUrlingtOn Free
Press.
"YoU are opposed to the use of slang, then,
Jennie?" he said. "Well, should twitter."
she replied, and then he knew that he must
not use slang any more in her presenee.-S0na-
ergiAe Journal.
A CLEVELAND (OHIoj MAN, while milking,
tied the cows tail to his own leg 10 keep her
from Topping the milk in his face. The
neighbors who saw him 90 by thought he was
training for a walking match, and cheered
him on.
AMERICAN JOURNALIsM.-A san Francisco
morning paper having announced the tragI-
evening paper Of the city that day published
the last words of the unfortunate creature
lie Figaro.
"AND 50 you have been to Europef Did you
20 10 Switzerland, and did you see the gla-
ciers:" Mrs ShOddy-"Oh, yes, we see me
don't take any interest IN such vulgar per
constellation Transcript.
ONE Of the worst feelings that young men Of
this country are called upon to feel is when
they have made a SO bill look like II had gone
girl at the opera get mashed on a DoW-legged
tenor Washington Hdtchet.
''Wen, my daughter, your mother and
have been consulting recently about the win
dOws for our new house. What kind would
YOU like in the parlort" ''Oh. thank you.
papa, for seeking my advice. should prefer
beau windows, by all means. "-BOstOR Budget.
YOUNG HoPEsBY says the worst trait pos
sessed By his girls father Is his prOneness 10
mlsconstrue plain, practical questions. When
he asked the old man for his daughters hand,
the father gave him his foot. Such weakness
in a father Is enough to discourage the most
persistent and passionate lOver-Drake's
TrdUeAer's Mdgdstne.
IT is stated that a Russian has been awarded
patent which promises to work ''revolu-
ton in the match making industry" Iflt Will
prevent rich mems daughters from clipping
with their fathers coachmen, ana encourage
legitimate matchmaking, which Will prove
satisfactory to the old folks, the revolution"
can't strike this country day too SOON
YOrristO1CH Herald.
Masonic CUSTOMs.-''SO the Arabians 20
to lodges and come home late, just as you do"
said Mrs. Mannerly to her husband, who was
OF a cOnvivial turn Of mind. Il don't know
he stammered. But know they do, for |
read in a paper that when an Arabian enters
his house he removes his shoes and keeps on
home late from the dge."-Tezas SJtiHgs.
DIR. BIRD, once physician in Edinburgh,
was in the habit Of taking a long walk at an
early hour every morning. On one occasion
he met a friend-a man of extremely slender
and wiry appearance-whO greeted him bOis-
terOuslv with: 'Ha! good morning. This is
indeed the early birdH The response came,
accompanied by meaning smile: And it
would seem have caught the worm"
A PECULIAR RACE.-"Did you read what
Stanley says about the negro women IN Afri-
car" asked Gus de Smith, of GilhOOly. mo -
''They must have very peculiar shapes. He
says in one part Of his lecture that they are
very careful about their children, and never
take their eyes of them, and afterward he
says they always carry their children on their
ba ks. They must be shaped different from
the darkeys we see here in Austin.-Iecas
SitiHgs.
AT a Christmas in Maine
Mr.. James q. blaine
Hung up near the bed his old stocking.
Elkins Claus came along,
And for a mere song
Filled it up with some big shares of Hooking.
When the story was told
Blaine wrote a lie bold,
In a way that was perfectly shocking.
- Courier ,fOuYndI.