davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22
VOL. XXIX---NO. 8.
VARIETIES.

| Vii make an oat of that" is what the
| farmer said when planting his seed.
The dictionary is not as big as the post
| office, but il contains more letters to the
| square inch.
-"Your little boy appears to be particu-
larry lively, madam" "Oh, yes" replied the
| lady, sWeetly, he thinks he is in church."
Mamma, what are twins made for ?" ask
ed little girl the other day. Her precocious
| elder brother replied $50 that cannibals
may cat philop@nas."
Among the tombs Stout party-"Well
Pat, hows trader" Grave digger-"Poorly,
SURF, entirely; shure we haven't buried liy-
In sowl this three weeksp'
My DEAR" said wife to her husband
VI shall henceforth call you Fire" "Why,
love, will you apply such peculiar name to
me !" asked her husband. because you 20
out every night"
is your wife acquainted with the dead
languages?" asked the professor off New
nun man Maybe she is" was the reply,
nut the language she uses is entirely too
warm to have been dead very long,"
1t is single fact that girl who when
she is alone can put her hands on the top rail
OF fence and skip over like u lamb at play,
Will, II her beau is along, give him as much
trouble in helping her over as though she
was rheumatic locomotive.
-Teacher-"Who reigned after Saul ~
Scholar--"Dayid." "Who came after David?"
solomon" "Who came after Solomon ?"
The Queen OF Sheba," answered the pale
young man on the back bench, and the
teacher turned TO Corinthians. and looked
solemn.
"A writer in northern newspaper saws
that he can throw piece of Arkansaw corn
bread through brick wall ten feet thick
This story is greatly exaggerated az nine feet
and half is the thickest wall'through which
u piece OF the bread can be thrown. Such
wreckless writers tend TO bringa State into
contempt.
oh, yes, dear girl, work us n motto for n
present. But have some taste. Last year
girl gave us one that read, Honesty is the
best policy" and another damsel one that
declared "Repent for the Kingdom of
Heaven is at handr Somehow those didn't
just strike us pleasantly. They seemed to be
well, you understand.
p,or W.T., ,.o
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22
What the Diver Sees,

The first sensation in descending under
water in suit Of armor is the sudden burst
ing roar in the cars caused by the air driven
into the helmet from the air.pump. The fex-
ible air hose has to be strong enough
to bear pressure of twenty-five to fifty
pounds to the square inch. The drum of the
ear yields to the strong external pressure,
the mouth opens Involuntary, the air rushes
into the tube and strikes the drum, which
strikes back to its normal state with sharp,
pistol-like crack. Peering through the Cog
gle eyes of glass in his helmet, the diver sees
the strange beauties about him clearly, and
in their calm spendor. Above him is pure
golden canopy, while around him and beside
him are tints and shimmering hues, including
all colors, which are indescribably elegant.
The floor of the sea rises like golden carpet,
inclining gently to the surface. The change
OF familiar objects are wonderful. The wreck
OF ship seems studded with emeralds, gilt
tering in lines of gold Z; piles of brick assume
the appearance of crystal; ladder becomes
silver, every shadow gives the impression of
a bottomless depth.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22

COMPLAINING TRAvELER.-On n Southern
railroad the other day passenger complain
ed to the conductor about the dusty state of
the seats and windows, and directly followed
it up by finding fault with the roughness of
the track, and the apparently unsafe condi-
ton of the car The conductor was very
courteous, but entirely non. committal This
provoked the traveller to continue his COM
plants, and he presently said:
II fail to see any water cooler in this car"
mo, we have none'
"And the front door won't shut"
"No."
And the wheels rattle as if worn out"
"That's So"
"And, sir" exclaimed the provoked pas.
senger, II wouldn't give you twenty-five
cents on the dollar for the stock of your mis-
cradle line!"
"lts only quoted at fifteen" said the con-
ductor, as he rose up to go forward
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22
gnetiral.
THE PARTING HOUR.

There's something in the parting hour
Will chill the warmest heart
Yet kindred, comrades, lovers, friends,
Are fated all to part
But this I've seen-and many pang
Has pressed 1T on my mind
The one who goes is happier
Than those he leaves behind.
No matter what the journeys be-
Adventurous, dangerous, far,
To the wild deep or bleak frontier,
To solitude or war;
Still something cheers the weary heart
In all of human kind,
And they who go are happier
Than those they leave behind.
The bride goes to the bridegrooms home
With doubling and with tears,
But does not hope her rainbow spread
Across her cloudy fears?
Alas the mother who remains,
What comfort can she find,
But this-the gone is happier
Than the one she leaves behind,
Have you a friend-a comrade dear,
An old and valued friend2
lie sure your terms of sweet concourse
AT length will have an end
ana when you part-aS part you will
Oh take it not unkind,
That he who goes is happier
Than you he leaves behind,
God wills it so-and so 1t is,
The pilgrims on their way,
Though weak and worn, more cheerful are
Than all the rest who stay;
And when, at last, poor man, subdued
Lies down to death resigned
May he not still be be happier far
IMAM those he leaves bchindp
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22
What will III do?

Browns Iron Bitters? Good for
what? Well, see what it has done.
To begin a0iM dyspepsia. 1t has
cured some of the worst cases.
Then cAiAs and fever. Who
wants to shake with cold and burn
with heat, when a bottle or two OF
Browns Iron Bitters will drive the
source of the mischief away?
How about rheumatism? 1t cured
Mr.. Brashear, of Baltimore, and
hundreds of others.
Those dread/ul nervous troubles.
Mr.. Berlin, Of Washington, the we'll
known Patent attorney, was entirely
relieved by Browns Iron Bitters. p,
The ailments Of tie kidneys.
Browns Iron Bitters cured Mr.. Mon
taeue, Of Christiarsburg, Va, and
an army of other sufferers.
DEBILITY and Mnguor. The Rev.
J. Marshall West, Ellicott City, Md,
is one of the many clergymen re-
,.ored by Browns Iron Bitters.
And as with vertigo, malaria, liver
complaint, and headache, Browns
lion Bitters is the Great Family
Medicine. .
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22

SANDS THAT SING.-The superintendent
of the various life-saving stations have been
instructed to furnish, for scientific purposes,
samples of the so-called Singing sands"
wherever found. These sands get their
name from the peculiar sound, resembling
somewhat the barking of dog, which they
give forth when walked upon or disturbed in
any way. This property is possessed only
by dry sand found between the water line
and extreme high tide marks along the sea-
coast and the shores of the great lakes. AL
ready twenty,six samples of this sort of sand
have been received, indicating its existence
in as many different localities in this coun-
try. Heretofore these singing beaches have
only been known to exist in two places, one
in this country and the other in Europe.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22

Posi-. OFFIE IN KEa.-The simplest post
Office in the world is in the Magellan Straits,
and has been established there for many years.
1t consists of small cask, which is chained
to the rocks of the extreme cape in the
straits, opposite Terra del Fuego. Each
passing ship sends boat to open the cask
and take letters out and place Others in it,
The post office is selfacting, therefore, it is
under the protection of all the navies of all
nations, and up to the present time there is
not single case torcport in which any abuse
Of the privilege it affords has taken place.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22

WHY He WASN'T THERE Now.-Koscius-
ko Murphy, who is ook-keeper in gro
Gerry house, met friend who clerks in a
cigar store on Austin avenue and asked him
for cigar.
"Ain't got any" said his friend.
"Ain't got any ?" said Kosciusko. "Why,
when used TO work in cigar store, al
ways had my pockets stuffed with cigars"
Yes probably that's the reason you amt
in cigar store now" was the crushing re.
ply.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22
The Egis and Intelligencer
Is FURNISHED EVERY FRIDAYBY
f. W. B A K E r.
a Year, in Advance.

TRANSIENT ADVERTISEMENTS Square, 3
insertions or less $l.50. Each subsequent insertion,
25 cents. Longer advertisements in the same pro-
portion. A space equal to six lines makes squa' TO-
Figure-work double price.
Obituaries and Personal Communications will
be inserted at ten cents per Incl
~ Yearly advertisements at special rates.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22
l.5O PER ANNUM.
6au Street Column.

A Comfortable Omnibus will be found
waiting ut the Maryland Central Depot,
In Baltimore. to convey passengers Free
of Charge TO Old Town. Return tickets
10 the station will be furnished by amy
member of the Old Town Merchants AS
sOciatiOn.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1884-02-22

Offering in detail: Mother-"I am afraid
Mr.. Drisscross is not serious in his atten-
ton r. Daughter He is awful bashful, you
know but he's offering himself piece -meal. =
Last night he wanted Inc to take his arm"
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
Resolution No. 253.
Resolution Of intention to improve AID
grade Macy street from Old Also
Road to covered bridge

Be It resolved by the Mayor and
Council Of the city Of Los Angeles:
SECTION l. That it is the intention Of
the Mayor and Council Of the City Of
Los Angeles to cause to be improved and
graded. At the expense Of the property
owners. Macy street from Old Also
Road 70 tho covered bridge in the follow.
lag manner.
The roadbed shall be graded and COW
ed with 8 inches Of gravel rakcd free
q cosrse stones Of more than 2 inches in
diameter, and IL shall be made TO con-
form to the established grade ct the cen
tsr of the street with the proper slope
towards the curb; after being grsvelled
II shall be thoroughly wet and then
rolled.
Tbs curb shall bs Of redwood 3xl2
inches placed with the upper edge TO
the established srsds and spiked TO posts
Of redwood lx4 inches, feet long. set
into the ground full length below the
top Of the curb and inside Of the same,
and not more than four feet apart. and
one 10 each joint Of the curbirg.
Ths sidewalks shall be 10 feet wide,
graded and covered with Q inches Of fine
gravel, smoothly laid and raked free
Of COARSE stones Of more than inch
In diameter. The slope Of the sidewalks
shall be three inches towards the curb.
SEo. 2. That the exterior boundaries
Of the district Of land to be affected or
benefited bv said work or improvement.
and 10 be assessed to pay the costs aud
expenses thereof, are a. follows;
Commencing ct the point Of intersc-
ton oi the west boundary Of Old Also
Road with the south boundary Of Macy
street. and running thence along the
west boundary Of Old Also Road south
srly 20 feet, thence on . line PARALLEL to
tie eshtsr line Of Macy street easterly
1861 feet to the covered bridge, thence
on line ct right asgles to the center
line Of Mscy street northerly 200 feet,
thence on line parallel to the center
line Of Macy street westerly 1851 feet,
thence soushsrly l40 feet TO the point Of
beginning.
SEC. 3. The Clerk Of the Council
shall certify to the passage Of this rsso-
luton, and shall scause tho came to be
published once in the Los Angeles Daily
HrsALD. and thsreupon and thereafter
Il shall take effect and be In force.
! hereby certify that the foregoing
resolution was adopted by the Council
Of the city Of Los Angeles ct IL meet.
ing Of March 3lst, A. D. 1884.
w. w. RoBfSsox,
Clerk Of the Council of the city OF Los
Angeles.
Approved this lst day of April, A.
D. 1854.
IL WALTER 8. MooRK.
Mayor pro TEN.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
Dress Goods.

Can we not truly say that our Silk
and Dress Goods Department is the
most popular Of any store in town.
Whyy The clerks are always polite
and attentive; they have large and va
ried stock to show you, embracing the
latest novelties. and our prices must be
low or our trade would not be so large
and constantly increasing.
This week we wish you to notice our
00c Elegant Black Gros. Grain Silks,
which are the same goods we have been
retailing at $l.50. Elegant, rich and
drossy. Do not let your chance pass by.
00c-Our Black Brocaded Silks--all
pure silk. These goods have been re-
tailed at Sl.65.
e1.OO-Our line of $l.5O Colored
Dress Silks, in the leading shades, is
placed before you.
5Sc-One Thousand yards OF all
wool, 46 inch wide Shoodshs, that we
have been selling at 81 90.
Ask us why this reduction.
45c-Double-width, all.wool Black
Cashmeres. same as our $50 grade.
IL l.2c-Half.woo Plaids. in beau.
tiful combinations, being the 25c grade.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
NEW TO-DAY.
Is the Revolution Sale a Success?

Ask your neighbor who has attended
1t and profted by the thousands Of va
rious bargains laden upon our 100 feet
Of centre tables. Every night until the
midnight hour has told in changing
tones the approach Of another day, have
we been at work replacing the inroads
Of the days sales upon our centre bat.
terry with new and more effective bar
gains.
In addition to these powerful attrao-
lions we have commenced series Of
hourly sales, between 10 and ii A. NJ.
and 3 and Ar. NJ. At these times only,
we take special line of goods, previ.
ously advertised in the local columns,
and sell them at one half our regular
prices. Attending these sales you will
be richly rewarded for your trouble.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
,. Haanon, II D.
County Physician.

nAscAREl ButpNo. upaain Rsadssss
Cosmopolitan Hotsl
otsos hours NON 10 70 y 4 =; isoai y Ann
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
WEEKL7 HERALD.
LATE TELEGRAMS.
SPECIAL TO THE HERALb.l

Legislative Prseeediags at use.
SACRAMENTO, April 3.--Absentess Of
the Senate continue to delay business.
Tho committees bury Spenoer's bills. A
motion TO increase the various commit
tees duties was postponed until to.mor.
row. The House finally passed the
Barry bill by 70 ayes and 2 nays.
suicide Of . Candidate for Cen
gress In Alabama.
NASHVILLE. Tenn, April 3.-Capt.
VIM. Robinson, Democratic candidate
for Congress from the 8th Alabama Dis
trict against Gen. Joe Wheeler, commit
ted suicide ct Scarsboro, Alabama, last
night, by sticking penknife into his
heart. He bad just returned from an
slectiensering tour. and the supposed ex-
eitsmsnt affected bis mind.
A Premlnent Csttsn Operator
Duieiles-C Cause financial Kn-
barraosnent.
SHRsvEPoRr, La, April q. 3.-Msjor C.
G. Thurman, prominent memb1r OF the
Cotton Exchapga, and q we'll known
cotton operator, suicided last night by
shooting himself through the head. The
cause was financial embarrassment.
Result ~ the EleetIsn In Rhsde
Island.
PnovIDENoE, April 3.-The following
10 the vote for Governor, with one dis
trict lacking Bourne. Republican. H.
827; Tegar, Democrat, 0,645; scattering,
is. The Legislature will stand, Senate
27 Republicans and . Democrats. The
House. 81 Republicans snd l6 Demo.
Gratis. A Republican loss in the Senate
and Republican gain Of in the House.
gsur Victims sf Triehias /.
Pennsylvania.
LATRoBE, Pa. April 3.--Mrs Galle
snd daughter, v otims of trichine, Loya +.
Hanna, Pa, died this morning, and the
father and another daughter are not ex-
pscted TO recover.
senator Mahsse's CssAitlen I'm
Improved.
wAsHISGrss, April 8 senator Ma
homes condition is not improved. His
friends are very anxious.
Aaerlean Ulsslsn Nehss1s In
Asia 0lnoF.
LONDON, April 3.--In the House Of
Commons neat Monday, James Brice,
liberal. will ask whether the government
is prepared to rsmonstrate with the
Porte for closing the American Mission
schools in Asia Minor.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
Hosiery.

MOShCEys
You will find Hosiery cheaper than
Shoes. We purchased the entire stock
Of q iobber who was sorely in need of
money, and more hose than money.
hence your benefit.
Lot 1--l000 pairs Of full finished
Balbriggan Hose; four pairs for so cents,
worth 81.
Lot 2-I5l2 pair of Slate and Car
dinal Seamless Hose 2 pairs for 45c, reg
ular value 600.
Lot $500 pairs of striped and
solid clocked Hose, seamless, 2 pairs
for 500, worth 81.
Childrens Hose, 5-4.S-2 pairs for SOC.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
Gents. Furnishing Goods.

GcutS FuFmh1mlmR GOOOSs
Our entire basement is fitted up for q
salesroom Of gents' wear. You will save
money by buying from us; being near
the center of the earth we ask bottom
prices.
This week fine merino underwear 90c
per suit, worth $l.75.
Full finished hose 4 pairs Soc, worth 81.
Full finished working hose 4 pairs Doc,
worth 81.
8 pairs seamless white 25c,
2 pairs finest colored hose soc.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
d. Joseph Kurts

No ss Main sssssA oppodss Baker Block
WEys and sar dissasss treated Win he esss q
. specalisG ap11
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
Shoes.

We sell our shoes from SOC to $3.50
per pair cheaper than our neighbors.
The bulk Of our goods are manufactured
for as and we know what they are.
This week our Shoe Department will
work wonders.
Our Calf Skin Cable Screw Tipped
Shoe that we sell at sl.75 will be sold
for 75c.
!, r,.t, ct Al, - Ill -
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
o.ifornia Grapes in france


A correspondent under recent date
writes to the Tribune: ''CaliforniA
grapes sal In Paris for ninety per cent.
more than grapes Of French production.
Thers y NO reason why grapes thus VAL
usd for their delicious tasts should not
make = good wins - the French grapes.
The great trouble Is that our Americans
are TOO anxious TO realise immedIateIy
On their xintaEes. The chsmpagnss Of
France are seldom In great stook, and
are nurssd and treated through long
series Of years before being put on the
market. II requires immsnse capital TO
do this, which Americans are unwilling
10 invsst. Il they would trsAt the pro-
duct In California = = y trsatsd In
Iss.ss - 80 sass; 's'' = One
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04

N0rE:-Mr. Enrieht's special agent is In Los
Angsiss At present. selling the celebrated latest
improved twenty-five hosss power EnrGht Straw
Burning Thre hing Engines, which for power,
STEADY motion, ability and workmanship can
not BE- sxceIlsd. For further information apply
~ ". 9. Maxwell's once. rs Court street. Los An.
gsles. mhz9-1w
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
FlsWIR slIDs.
THI ltEADQUARTERs

looo pspsrs frssh Flower sssda iust receives
and toE usls BY HICKS. DupuY CO.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
NEW TO-DAY.

So. so and $500 will be sold at sl.50.
Misses and ladies' likewise.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
PORTABLE ENGINE
FOR SALE.

The NJ dersigned has on hand and for sale
q San Jose, several excellent second hand Port
abis Engines at greatly redocsd rates. They in
clude Ames Engines. Rice Engines. Hoadiey's
Wood and Manns Garr-Scott's and EnrIeht's
old styles, both wood burners and straw burn
ers. Ihay arc snitable for light threshng, bar.
win be sold cheap.
sesspm EaRscmr, San ,o.s.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
Dornestics.

We do not bait you on muslins and
scalp you on the next article. We have
honest brands at honest prices and sell
them lower than the spider peJs.
Our 4sc table linen, a splendid value
at 900.
35c buys dozen all-linen napkins,
handsome patterns.
sec a dozen checked napkins, all
linen, $50, worth 75c.
The best linen damask towels ever
sold.
Our 3 for zoo all linen damask
3 for coo g !"
4 for $50 %
for 81
towels excel and are revolutionary in
price.
Remnants of all kinds on our Centre
Tables.
Parasols at 33a per cent. less than
regular prices.
,ntinues. The bargains are
or and constantly chang
new. the variety is
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-04-04
NrA Alics HisginA n. D.

T u ICIAN " AND y no = ON
once and Rssidencs-No. 10 Fort street, 10
Angeles, Cal 0fncs hourH. 10 10 u A n, 70
p. n, 7 10 Q in the evening. 40 LIN
Daily Republican., 1884-09-23

1
Board.
Colonel Heisler stated that he had
given notice of the resolution last j Jnhe
and he thought that sufficient time hisd
been given for the mem bers to look into
1t. He also requested that the "mem Der
FROM the the smoky hills of the Bran
dywine should be required to study the
phraseology of the resolution" DE-.
Sh0rtlidge replied that "phraseology is
pretty good and it is that I'm try
ing to get at" After some further dis
cussion DR.. Shortlidge moved to strike
out all before the word arrested !" and
after the word " Resolved, which
would leave nothing of the resolu-
ton but the words Resolved, arrested.
This motion caused considerable meri.
ment, but the question was disposed
OF by DR. KeAhles moving that the
matter be laid on the table, which was
adopted.
DIR. West, in behalf Of Professor
Crabbe, asked the loan of fifteen or TWEEN.
ty desks to help him to start q private
school. DR.. Shortlidge urged that the
request be granted, and stated that the
Board ought to be glad to get rid OF
them. Some objections were raised
but afterwards withdrawn, and the re-
quest granted, as was also . similar re-
quest from lady.
A bill of $40 for whitewashing at No.
8 was ordered paid. Mr.. Belts called
attention to the need of trees around
No. and other schools, and on his mo-
tion q committee of three was appoint
cd to investigate the matter. The Board
appointed Messrs. Belts, Shortlidge
and Moore, and the Board adjourned.
Daily Republican., 1884-09-23
Prudence.

The great end of prudence is to give
cheerfulness to hose hours which
splendor caunot glid. and exhortation
cannot exhilhrate-those soft intervals
of unbended amusement in which q
man shrinks to his natural dimensions,
and throws aside the ornaments or dis
guises which he feels in privacy to be
useless membranes, and to lose all
effect when they become familiar. To
be happy at home is the ultimate re-
suit of all am bition-the end to which
every enterprise and laber tends, and Of
which every desire prompts the prose-
cution. It. il, indeed, at home that
every man must be known by those
who would make just estimate either
of his virtue or felicity for smiles aud
imbroiderylsre alike occasional, and the
mind is often dressed for show in paint
ed honor and fictitious benevolence.
Daily Republican., 1884-09-23
war on enc sparrow .

War has again been declared against
the English sparrow. The hardy and
aggressive bird g enemies are mobilizing
with the determination TO make q more
determined and vigorous attack upon
him than he ever before experienced.
The leaders in the movement are orni-
biologists and sportsmen. They have
prepared . circular petition, that has
been widely distributed and extensively
signed, asking that some concerted ao-
ton be taken TO exterminate the for
eignor." The bird is spoken of AS an
intolerable pest, and, besides being
put down as . general nuisance he is
charged with ruthlessly numbering or
driving away our own sweet voiced
songsters." The petitions are to he sent
to the Ornithological Union in New
York and the society will take some &C
tiOn regarding them.
Daily Republican., 1884-09-23
The Fair at Readiug. .

An excursion train under the super.
vision of j. DeGodt will be run from,
this city to Reading, Pa, on Thursday,
the 25th inst, in order to give our citi-
zens an opportunity to visit the Berks
County agricultural exhibition to be
held at that place. All who wish to
view fine horses, cattle, sheep and
swine, as well as apples, pears, pota.
toes, and agricultural machinery, and
fine trotting, should make this trip in
order that they may see what the
peoples of this fertile county can do.
and contrast their productions with
those of our own State. A day cannot
be spent more protitably. Besides, the
ride up the Brandywine and along the
mountain sides will prove very exhila.
rating. To use Mr.. DeGodt's words !:
For attractive novelties and instruc-
tive scenes, this trip takes the PALM"
The fare is only 81 so for the trip. See
advertisement.