davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
Boston 6 Maine Railroad.

On and after Monday, Oct. Is, 1883,
PASSENGER TRAINS WILL LEAVE
-, PORTLAND for BOSTON
ma sr szS e. At M ,st Too and Sso
BOSTON FSR P0RFG IaG 51s At 500 500 g. 3. M m.
It oo a zoo go5 a asv io s. pG or M
PORTLAND FOR sCARBORO BEACH
AND PI [Ssa I PS5N Tn q s15 sd5
FOR sACo AND RID1EF0RD at SIS,
SaS ~ U a. si5 SIS sna 0aG p Too SO
and 5.45 p. M. FOR WELLS at 6.15, 8.45 a.
M \, !, and q g; 800 E. m; SSee note FoR NORTH
FALLS and GRE an FALLS. at s.15, s.45
a. m, LOO and 300 p. m. FOR NEWMAR-
ETER {. Pa MaS vi Sisii I GAwRE az
AND LOWELL at 6.15, 8.45ssa: M, LOO
MINGTON, N. H, AND ALTON BAY. at
GaE q ~ AND Nd GSNcoRp. n. ~. IVA VIA
New Market Jct:) at clio a. M, $3.50 p M, (via
HiORN I'M N 81 TRAINS FOR PORTLAND
YER at 500. ARRIVING afro RTTAND
at $50 and 1905.
NorE-The $50 p. m. train from Portland soig
not stop at Scarborough, Pine Point, Old Orchard
Wells and the LOO p. m. train will stop at Scarbor
ough, Pine Point and Wells only to take passengers
kB-The LOO p. m. train from Portland con.
meets with Sound Lime Steamers for New
Yerlx and all Rail Lines for the West and the $50
p. M, train with all RaiI Lines for New Work
and the South and West.
ParIor Cars on all through trains. Seats
secured In advance at Depot Ticket Office.
SUNDAY TRAINS.
PORTLAND FOR BOSTON and WAY
STATIONS at 100 p. M BOSTON FOR
PORTLAND at 900 D. m.
Trains on Boston g. Maine road connect with all
steamers running between Portland and Bangor,
Rockland, Mt. Desert, Machias, Eastport, Calais,
St. John and Halifax. Also connect with Grand
Trunk trains at Grand Trunk Station, and Maine
Central and Portland Ogdenburg trains at Trans-
fer Station.
All trains stop at Exeter ten minutes for refresh
meass; First class Dining Rooms at Portland.
transfer station, Exeter, Lawrence and Boston
THROUGH TICKETS to ali points West and
South may be had Of M. L.. xViIlia a, e. Ticket
Agent, Boston g. Maine Depot, and at Emfon
Tickef Ofsice, 40 Exchange st.
j. Z. FURBER, Gen. Supt
8 H. STEVENS, Gen. Agent. Portland.
oct11 diff
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
MEMORANDA.

Sch j P Merriam, which arrived at Winterport
18th. as cut through by ice same night and partly
filed with water; about 200 sacks shorts and $50
worth goods were destroyed
Sch Traverse, from Portland for Rockland, before
reported wrecked on the Brothers. went on during
the night of the 17th The masts were cut away
and the crew escaped them to the shore, where
they remained twelve hours. They were taken off
the island by the q steamer Dallas.
Sch Albert, Rich, of and from Calais for Hyannis
put into Boston 21st leaky and with sails split in
heavy Sc gale 10th inst. Has been thirty days on
the passage
Sch Laura Bridgman, which went ashore near the
Pavilion, Asbury Park, NJ, last summer, has been
broken up, and some of the wreckage damaged the
pavilion during the last storm.
Bermuda, Jan 13-Brig Harry Stewart for Turks
Island. dragged ashore 9Th Washington Point
She came Off 18th Without damage and ysent TO sea
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
General Ocean steamer Ticket ONCE,

nor sale Of passage tickets by the White Star.
n Cunard, Anchor, State, American, Red Star
North German Lloyd, Hamburg, American, Rotter,
dam, Amsterdam and Italian lines, all first class
fast passage steamers, to and from all points in
Europe. Cabin, I'd Cabin and steerage outward and
prepaid tickets from Portland at lowest rates.
Steerage prepaid tickets from inland places in Eu-
rope to inland places in the United States. Ster-
ling and Scandinavian exchange at lowest rates
Choice Cumberland and Acadia coal for sale by tn
cargo. For cabin plans circulars, sailing schemes
Agent, 20 Exchange St. P. o. Box 979.
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
RAILROADS.
Eastern Railroad.
Trains leave PORTLAND

Trains leave Portland
At 2 ns ma. Daily {NighA Pullmsnl for Seoo
BiadefoEd, Kennebunk, Conway Junct., Kittery
Portsmouth, Newburyport, Salem, Lynn and
Boston, arriving at 6.80a. m.
Ats ID q. m. for Cape Elizabeth, Scarboro, Saco
Biddeford, Kennebunk, Wells North and South
stations on Conway Division. Kittery, Portsmouth,
NeWburyport. Salem, Gloucester, Rockport,
Lynn, Chelsea and Boston arriving at l .16 o. m
At Loo p. nm. for Scarboro, Saco, Biddeford
Kennebunk, Wells No. Berwick, Conway
junction, Kittery, Portsmouth, Newburyport
Salem, Lynn and Boston, arriving at $40 p. m.
connecting with Sound and Rail Lines for all
Southern and Western points.
at 500 p: na. Expressl, for Boston and principal
Way Stations, arriving in Boston at $50 p. M,
connecting with Rail Lines for New York.
Sundays at 2.O0p. m. Express for Boston and
principal Way Stations, arriving at Boston $50
2. M, connecting with Fall River Line for New
Trains Leave Boston
At7.30, 900 g. M, and arrive in Portland at IL 65
a. m. and 90 p. m. At IL. 30 p. m. and arrive
In Portland 300 p. m At TOO N, Daily,
and arrive in Portland at 11.00 p. m.
Pullman PariOr Cars
On Trains leaving Boston am, 1890 and 2, 90 D.
m. and Portland 8.45 a. m, 100 and 600 D. N.
Through Pullman Sleeping Cars
On Trains leaving Boston at TOO P. m. and Port
land 200 q. m.
Through Tickets 10 all Points south and
West.
Oct. IA. 1883 PAYsoN TUCKER,
ID. w. SANBORH, General Manager
Master of Trans. LUCIUS TUTTLE
octl3dH Gen'l Pass'r Agent
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
ID O ID DIS

Newspaper Advertising Agency,
9S5 WASHINGTON ST., BOSTON
Advertisements received for every Paper in the
United States and British Provinces at the Loves
Contract Prices. ANY Information cheertnllY given
and estimates promptly furnished.
File OF the PRESS kept for Inspections sny tiHa
ESTIMATES furnished. Send for Circular,
tot 100 choice newspapers.
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
Whero Others FniI.

The merits of ATHLoPHoRos as specific for
Rheumatism and Neuralgia are best proved by
the fact that it cures when other treatment
fails. Says Mr.. G.. G. Thompson, Of New Ha-
ven: "For twelve years have been a suf-
ferer from Rheumatic Neuralgia, which at
tackled me suddenly without warning, destroy
ing all hope of sleep or rest. have tried hum
dreds of remedies. With the exception of
ArHLoPHoRos not one of them afforded me the
slightest benefit. 1t has done me more good
than all the other remedies combined"
Chemical analysis shows that there are just
three cents worth OF gold in every ton of sea
wsser-hence the expression, oceans of mon
ey"
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
LEAVE For PORTLAND AND RnSInN

From EEnligax. $40 a. M, 81 5 p. M; ST. John.
$50 a. M, 800 p. M; Meuiaon $50 a. m.
$50 p. M; 90. stephen, lois q. A.,
$50 p. M; Vanceboro, 1.35 q, m. 40
p.m,; Huckspcrs, $40 a. m, I.30 n. M.
Bangee, 7.l5 g; M; 7.45 p; m; Dexser, TOO
skewhegan, 8.20a. m. 3.15 D. "a; ygater,,
Vile, 9.16 IN; 1.55 spd 1900 p. m; and on
n: 1890 ., ~ ~, 2'45, and 1856 p. nj
and lila p M; Bath. sos .. m. II 90 .. M;
400 p. M, and Saturdays only az 81 s55 n M
Brunswick. 7.25 and 11.3O a. m. 4 20
12sD :: NJ night} 9ssckland, IS a. NJ,
4:15p. m. 30 pm; Phillips, 6.65 a. m.
Farmington, so 9. M; Winthrop, lO.13s.
IN. being due In Portland as follows:Ihe morn
ing trains from M Augusta and Bath s,s5 .. m.
Lewiston, $40 q. m. The dag tsains from
Bangor, and all lnterIasdiate stations and COR
necting reada st 12.40 and 1916 .. m, The
afternoon trains from WaterviIle, Augusta Bath
Rockland and Lewiston at $40 p. m. re
Night Pull man Express train at 1.50 q, m.
Limited Tickets fsrst and secesasl class far
Ss. 3 ohm and AAaiifnx Ca ale as reduced
gates.
PAYsON TUCKER, GenI Manager.
&. e. BOOTHBY, Gen'l. Pass. Il Ticket Aet,
Portland Oct. IL. 1883 octi2dtf
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
SPECIAL RATES.
PREMIUM OFFER.

To anyone who obtains THREE Resc subsorIA-
ers to the Weekly PRESS at the club rate
we will send the Portland Daily PRESS one
year iors $8s
To anyone.who obtains FOUR new subscrib-
ers to the Weekly PRESS at the club rate
We will send the Daily PRESS one year for @5.75
To anyone who obtains FIVE new subscsibers
to the Weekly PRESS at the club rite we
will send the Daily PRESS one year fcs =. $3.50
To anyone who obtains TEN new subscribers
to theWeekly PRESS at the club rate we
will send the Daily PRESS one sAr for. -. SA.eo
To anyone who obtains TWENTY new sub
scribeTs to the Weekly PRESS at The club
rate (S1.25 each) we VIII send the DaAy
PRESS one year for ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. 93.oO
To any one who obtains THIRTY or more new
subscribers to the Weekly PRESS at me
club rate, ($1.25 each, we will send the
Daily PRESS one year .....................,FR 6R
Sample copies viii be sent on application.
Address all business cOmmunicationsito The
PORTLAND PUBLISHING CO.,
Portland hIaaBa
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
FINANCIAL AND COMMERCIAL

Portland Daily Wholesale EHArhef.
PORTLAND Jan. %.
No change in quotations to-day; business very dull
in all departments.
The following are to-day's closing quotations of
Flour, Grain, Provisions &c.
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23

Portland Daily tS10tesasS Market.
PORTLAND. Jan. %.
No change in quotations to-day; business very dull
in all departments.
The following are oday's closing quotations of
Flour, Grain, Provisions, &C.
ElOnr. Grain.
Superhne and old H. M. Corn car lots.75
low grades. 3 50ll4 go new do car lots. 65@68
Spring and Corn, bag lots. .@78
Xxx Spring. IS Dogs o0lOats, car lots. CAB
Patent Spring 80 80 Oats; bag lots.......45
Michigan Win Cottonseed, car lots 2s 20
ter straights5 25@6 70 CottonSeed, bag lots3O 90
Do roller: ;..6 25@6 so sackedBran car lot.
st. Louis VIM 10 50120 90
ter straight. 9 00@6 25l do bag LOTS. ..23 90
Do roller. ..6 50ll6 TO hfids, car lots.
Winter Wheat S241a @z515
atonts... :. g 1877 20 do bag lots ..s26 30
Produce. Provisions.
Maine * oO@13 ooI + Backs. 10 ooa1a so
Cape Cod.12 50a14 0Ol Clear -. Is OO@l8 SO
Pea Beans 2 90a3 10 Mess. ....,16 OO816 so
Mediums. - 1902 so Mess Beef. IL 5o312 90
German med2 S69z POI Ex Mess..12 5o@l3 GO
Onions Rbbl. 2 5o@2 e5 Elk Plate.l4 25a14 80
Irish Potatoes 40G45 Hams $3.50. 12@121sc
sweetPotatoes4 1895 90 Hams, covered 15 CLEO
Eggs " dog. .30@3lc Lard
Turkeys, " ib .2092lci Tub, W To 91a9 95s
Chickens. l69l7ci I1erces.. S%sg 5L2
rowL .''''.'-....lZgl4 ran. '..:,.. loglo72
Butter. Red Top. 30 00@325
Creamery .34G35c Timothy. :. 65@2 90
Gilt Edge YER. .33G34c OioVer.... 10 @12
Good. .....l5@16cl Muscatel, ....2 00D2 70
Store. ...........12@14clLon London Lay'r 2 1902 90
Cheese. Ondura 91a@l01@
Vermont III @15 Valencia. ...,... Ia IA
N Y Fact'y..1l 015 Oranges.
Apples. Valencia 50@6 so
Eating D Dbl. 3 O0l5 90 Florida ..4 OQ55 90
Evaporated " ID 1920 Messina .......2 50613 90
Dried Apples. .;;91a@1o Palermo. .....2 6e@2 10
Sliced ...10@10Is Eemoua.
sugar. Messina. ......6 0005 30
9Fanulated y ID 80. 854 Palermo go. A OO34 80
Extra Gs...,.........f%I
FREIGHTS--The markes generally remains in
substantially the condition noted last week.
There is no improyementin the demand and rates
are without material change.
The following are recent engagements:
Bark Louise Adelaide, Portland to the river, lum-
Der $3.50.
sehr Rosa Mueller, Ayers Island to Georgetown,
guano 1892,
Bark T. L. swett, Port Kemba to Callao. coal at
25s.
Brig Shasta Portland 10 Cuba, shocks and heads
20c
schr Annie Frye, Portland to New York. lumber
at current rates.
Schr Lucy A. Davis, Portland to Matanzas or Carr
denas empty hhds Soc.
schr Charles e, Schmidt Boothbay to Savannah
phosphate 200 % ton.
Bark Samuel E. Spring, Portland to Buenos Aye
res, lumber at current rates.
Schr Alice Montgomery Rockport to New Or
leans, ice So.
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
NEWS.
PORT OF PORTLAND.
TUESDAY. Jan. %.

TUESDAY. Jan. %.
Arrived
Steamship Scandinavian, (Br) Park, Glasgow
passengers and mdse to 81 & A Allan.
Steamer City of Portland, Pike, st John NIB via
Eastport for Boston.
Brig Shasta. Nichols Boston, to load for Cuba
Sch Nellie Star, Soule Philadelphia-coal to G 7
Railway Co.
Sch A M Howes. OBJ Richardson. Grand Manan
for Boston.
Cleared.
Brig Hyperion, Williams, oardenas-Isaao Emery.
SAILED-Sch Norena.
NJ Sargent, of Portland, has just closed con-
tract with Messrs Loring q Cobb, of Yarmouth for
a centre-board threemasted schr of 275 TONS after
model by Capt Chase of New Bedford She lis to
be of about the Goth Of May next and is to be en-
ployed in the coasting business in charge of Capt
Henry Willard Of Cape Elizabeth, a well known
and successful master.
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
FISTULA AND PILES

Cured without the Use OF the Knife.
WILLIAM READ on. D., Harv ard, I842), and
ROBERT NJ. READ MD, Har ward, 1879, Offices,
give special attention to the treatment of FHSTU.
LA, PILES AND ALI DIP EASES OF
THE RECTUM, without detention from busi-
on application.
Office Hours-1I am. to p.m.(except Sundays).
fehlO div
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
SAILING DAYs OF sTEAa1sHlPs.

MINIATURE ALMANAC. -. JANUARY 23.
Sun RISES. High water, (P ny. Gas
Sun sets. ........... 4.38 Moon rises....- 800
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
NrOTTCET WEREBY GIVEN. that n,

NOTICE rs HEREBY GIVEN, that the
IN subscriber has been duly appointed and taken
upon himself the trust of Administrator of the es-
tate of
JOSEPH MoULToN, late of Westbrook.
in the County of Cumberland, deceased and given
bonds the law directs. All persons having de-
mands upon the estate of said deceased. are re-
CURED to exhibit the same; and all persons indebt-
cd to said estate are called upon to make pay
ment to -
LEANDER VALENTINE, Administrator
Westbrook, Jan. 9Th, 1884. jan16dla w3wWs
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
Foreign Imports

GLASGOW. Steamship Scandinavian case of
sh hooks to Sargent, Lord g. Skillin.
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23
Hides and TalIow.

FUFCI&M EApUKass
cARDENAS. Brig Hyperion-374l shocks and
The Portland daily press., 1884-01-23

~ One and AIl.-Are you suffering from
Cough, Cold, Asthma Bronchitis, or any of the va
rious pulmonary troubles that often end in Con-
sumption? If SO, use "WjLbor's Pure Cod-LtUer OIL
and Lime a safe and sure remedy. This is no quack
preparation, but is regularly prescribed by the med
ieal faculty, Manufactured ouly by A. B. WILBoR,
Chemist, Boston. Sold by all druggists.
dec24eod6w1a
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-02-21
Wild Bird and Pet Poodle.

a woman living near Glendive, in
Dawson county, exhibited wonderful
GOODNESS and nerve few days ago and
furnished additional evidence that in
times of great danger woman is equal
to almost any emergency. She was
the owner of pet dog which on last
Thursday was playing in the yard with
another dog of about the same age and
complexion. Suddenly the canine
gave a yelp of almost mortal terror as
large eagle, with wings Of more am
pie proportions than a blacksmith s
apron, swooped down from the blue
! empyrean of heaven, and picked up
the little cur in his muscular talons.
With the true Western woman,
brought up amid the dangers of rough
border life, and with no tight fitting
skirt to prevent the free movement of
her limbs, to think is to act On the
instant this noble representative of
NOBLE sex flew into the kitchen where
her husband kept his trusty shot gun,
with when, in the early days when
bIoodthirs.y Indians were rampant on
the plains, he had often gone out and
shot fooi hens. She bounced out of the
front door gun in hand.
In an instant she directed her eagle
eye into the air, where, soaring about
ten feet distant, she discerned the car
nlvorious emblem of our national liber-
ties with her yellow poodle grasped
convulsively but firmly in its claws.
For moment she ran her trained eye
along the barrel of the gun in the di-
rection of the larcenous bird, c-osed
her liquid orbs with a shuIder and
banged away. When she opened them
the eagle was prospecting interste1ar
space and the dog lay scattered around
in fragments over the yard. She wept
hitter tears. -Monta12a Inter Ocean.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-02-21
A Fayorite of the Fairies.

Howard Lee is lad but II years of
age, well known in Washington as a
remarkably precOcious and manly little
fellow. He is very bright and self
possessed without being rude or i'll
hammered. Howard is a poor boy,
and lives at the suburban place of
Brightwood, and at as early an age as
6 years he walked to Washington every
morning and sold newspapers, and his
success was phenomenal. When the
forty-eighth congress convened he con-
ceived the idea of applying for an APP
pointment as a page in tie house. He
drew up an application addressed to
the doorkeeper and solicited several
members for their signatures, and his
petition grew strong, and he secured
the names of many members. Colonel
Ingersoll also Endorsed him thus, Chow
ard Lee is nv friend" During How
ards labors for his first political hon
ors congress took its holiday recess.
Christmas came, but it brought to him
Joy as well as what he supposed would
be a suspension of his efforts to get his
pageship. Representative E. John FL
lis and his wife sent for Howard on
Christmas day and presented to him a
suit of clothes. He received them
proudly, like man. Col. Ingersoll
also summoned the boy. Howard re-
sponded to the call of his friend, and
the colonel presented him a suit of
clothes, pair of shoes and an over
coat. AS he was turning away from
the colonel with his heart full of Joy,
the latter remarked, almost casually:
Howard, you may report to Door
keeper Wintersmith on january. You
are appointed page"
This brought the brave little fellow
to tears, and he started on run to his
home. On the way he was interrupted
by southern lady, who was captivated
by his good manners, and who capped
his good fortune by presenting him
with new hat, remarking, in all Sc
robustness:
Howard, 1 christen you to-day the
member from Brightwood."
Howard Lee is chip from the old
block that composed the family of
! General Robert E. Lee Washington
S7PciGL
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-02-21
"IeiI NE the old. old Story"

The dear little Misses we meet with in life,
What hopes and fears they awaken;
For when man chooses q Mis- for wife
He nay he NJ S. ed or Mistaken.
When courtcd Mss Kid, ana secured the
kiss.
thought, in the warmth of my passion,
That I'd made great Hit in thus gaining
But it was only Miss-calculation.
For so many Misses surrounded Miss Kid,
With me ana my love interfering,
jealous NJ sS-trust put it into her head
That she ought not to give men q hearing.
Then a certain Miss-chance that / met with
one day
Almost sent my hopes to destruction,
For she felt suspicion of what ] would say,
All owing 10 one Miss-construction.
Deceived by one INSTRUMENTATION ! wrote,
The cause of her anger demanding:
Miss-drcctiOn prevented her getting the
And introduced misunderstanding
When to make her my wife L eXultingly
swOre,
Miss-beief made her doubt my intention,
And / nearly got wed to misfortune before
could wean her from MIss-appl ehensIon.
But when she no longer would yield to Miss
Nor be led by Misrepresentation.
She had with MIss-like most serious fall out
And to wed felt no more hesitation.
But when TO the church to be married we
went,
MISTAKE made the parsOn to linger,
And / got so annoyed by an awkward MIss-ht,
That put the ring on the wrong finger.
Having been so Miss-used, l kept strict
watch,
For 1 sti i felt a fear of M.ss-eading;
And j found, when too late, an uniucky Miss
match
Interfered with the joys of our wedding.
Miss-ruIe in our dwelling put everything
wrong,
Acknowledgement there took her station,
Till my cash, like the time taken reading
this song,
Was all wasted by Miss application.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-02-21
NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS.
At a Recent Meeting of the Lime
Kiln Club.

About forty of the eldest members
gathered in the supper-room 10 have
little talk among themselves. The re-
salt was as follows:
Giveadam Jones resolved not TO burn
house nor rob a postoffi &c during the
year 1884
Waydown Bebee resolved not to COM
NIT murder during the new year unless
the provocation was 100 per cent.
greater than during the old
Plckles Smith agreed TO stop swear
ing and chewing plug tobacco.
Nelson Slabs resolved to begin n
bank book and save at least $50, 900
during the year.
Trustee Pullback had been scheminr
for several years to get TO the Legisla-
ture. He would now pledge his SOL
emn word to quit that business and pay
more attention to withdrawing.
Whalebone Howker had been in the
habit of burning three or four asvlums
! weekly. If others were willing to sac
rifice he would not bring up the rear.
Judge Cadaver had intended to way
lay and kill at least half dozen Alder
men during the year 1884, but if the
rest of the club were going to live on
tatfy he would follow suit.
Samuel Shin thought he could leave
off swearing, drinking, smoking, chew
ing. gambling, lying, stealing and
wife-beating. 1t might take him a few
weeks TO get accustomed to the new
situation. but he would do his best.
Prof. Slyback had cheated and lied
and deceived all his life. He didn't see
10 fpr ol,a ,-t
now, but if others were willing to fore
go pleasures and comforts he would
not be mean enough to hang back.
Rev. Penstock was SO truly good that
he didn't see how he was to be any bet
ter. He was about to sit down when
his attention was called to the fact that
he was never known to return Dor
rowed spade or shovel. He agreed to
be more careful in that respect in the
future, and dropped back with sigh
that was heard thirty-tive feet away.
Judge Congo had intended to blow
up the City Hall. burn two ferry boats
and start panic in q theatre, but if
the crowd was on the road to goOdy-
good he would not stand in the way.
He always went with the majority, no
matter what self-sacritce was re-
CURED.
Burdock Cantelope had firmly re-
solved that the next time his wife
pitched him against hot stove because
he couldn't afford her fur-lined cir
cular he would rise up and kiss his
eleven children goodbye and leave the
house forever. He had heard the re-
solves of the various members, and had
concluded to put up with his troubles
for another year.
Prof. Babylon Highbolt had made all
preparations to lick two certain bar
bers, run away from his mother-in-law
and sue two neighbors for throwing
bottles at his back door. He would
agree right here to drop all his plans
and continue life of misery.-Detr01
Free Press.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-02-21
What She Said About Him.

"What does your sister say about
me?" asked a young man of the small
brother of the maiden he thought he
loved. ''Oh, lotsr' sententiousIy ex-
claimed the precious boy. ''Well, tell
me, said the youth in coaxing voice.
''She says you've got lots of money"
..Well, what else?'' 81 don't like to
tell" ''Oh, come; tell me and I'll
give you some candy" ''WelI, she
said if she ever married you she'd loan
you to Farmer Cornstalk for a scare
crow" us that all, he sarcastically
inquired. ''Oh, no! She said ii it WASH t
for your ears the top of your head
would be an island, and that if your
nose was little longer you could stir
your coffee with it, and if" But the
young man had closed the front door
after him and was scooting down the
ct on dog trot.-NeD Orleans Pc
ag2k7ae.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1884-02-21

You were in need. So washed the
shirts. But l didn't mean to take the
payr'
MY own darling!' said Mr. Murray.
For men in love are unaccountable be-
lngs, and this little incident seemed to
make her dearer than ever to him.
L am going to keep this gold piece
always" said she.
i don't care what you do with the
gold piece" said Mr.. Murray, $50 long
as you give me yoursef!''
But isn't it a strange coincidence"
said Jo
THAT 1 love you?" said Mr.. Murray.
mot at all!'
1t was not quite what 10 meant, but
it was very satisfactory answer.