davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
TArkansaw Trayeler.1

A Chi man, who had married q
white woman, applied to the police
Judge the other day for divorce.
Don't like the white woman he said,
by means of an interpreter.
What objections have you to her? p
the Judge asked.
"Heeps."
"What has she done?"
Nothing, and that's why I don't
want her. Want wife to work. No
work, no wife. No work, no eat. You
may have her,
The Judge refused the generous offer,
and the discontented Celestial carried
his complaint to higher court.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Catching Ostriches In the Desert.
Cor San Francisco Bulletin


A striking difference exists between
the corraled and farmed ostriches and
those running over the African deserts,
inasmuch ~, the latter never fight DIR.
Sketchley hunted for nine months in
the desert. The birds have tC be
hunted scientifically. Certain facts are
known, one being that the birds will
always run in semi-circle. First they
will run with the wind that they may
use their wings to help them. After
they get what the sailors would call "a
head wind they go around the other
way. They must be run down. One
horse cannot wind them. The great
trouble is to keep them in sight. They
will run forty miles on q stretch. If
they ever get a breathing spell they
will get away. The hunter starts out
with fresh horse. A bushman boy
rides another and leads one
As soon as it is seen which way the
bird will run, the boy takes his cue and
drives to where he thinks the hunter
will need the fresh horse. In the mean
time the ostrich singled out for the
chase and the hunter, are speeding
along like the wind, the latter straining
every nerve to keep in sight of the bird,
and the bird making its most prodigious
strides for freedom. A great deal now
depends on the bushman boys judg-
ment, in having the fresh horse at the
right place that no time may be wasted
1t is seldom that the boy makes a mis-
take. The hunter leaps on the fresh
horse and gains on the bird, which,
growing tired. goes more and more
awkwardly. The hunter has only, when
he catches it, to rap it on the head with
his hunting whip and the chase is over.
There are really only two kinds of
ostriches, the North African and South
African birds. The males are black
and the females drab. All are of one
color, drab, until after they are two
years old.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

=, = ~ Ut IITIHE.
~" cn'nmisei"h ~hich has been in.
,,.-'Ka'ng ih" rapid depletion Of the
Mar land of stor lc'l~ will report to the
hen l'gi-laiur" plan conccling all
ule shallow Waters g. the tunpsn.n
ki'ihR hem really greater area than
a'e' nov have, bui dividing tho deep
s".f iniu t'n DISTRICTS. which may bc
di'e'isel alternately. with intervening
u's't'''s Il smaller .Ntcut. un which
u.'e shall Ia" nu dredging for an in
'ehhii" time. II 10 Thought that the
l'"hihi'"i STRIPS will l." permanent
"f.'dinR grounds. from which ilr tide
VII carry srai iO tao ncighboring
grounds fur th,if tseup.lntiou.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
now uyaon BECAME a Grnlus
aiaaisH u'm-"if "r unrd~psomc
.s.--ne-' It's t"trIi-rt was set
trse.

i,anf.-Hls liesl Loot n,rn
Whale hn VAS .ill ~ tamhrIlpr.
alr's w aurrssful author nul ap
pFoarhnr iletN,uii.ih,'r Ia, resolved
tofi hiu-,lf nt h. "hntd i.ninc and
dish rurha riuesn,ts llr began the
regimen of star, ,tlnn. Epson salt, and
hut mtha Whirl hr maintained fur the
fcst ct hs hir. anl which. Whl,
Il brought lam g. striking ami
unusual pli, siral l,oiuiy aud elegance.
brought hlm also 80 such spiritual and
Intellectual stftits a. oltrnr"s against
natnro alNats 'ntail. lie -y-'cmit 9.
ally sustained lifr on biscuits aud
soda u ater aud when hunger grew too
inlen.' O." ls' hr,rablo hr nduyrd m
frasls # poitoos. n-h. iioc and vinegar
Which gave him hronir- - lndig-st on
He w,s nearly always suffering from
aciual pang- II hunger. aud drank
iaadanum aud Hnm.tunna chewcd to
barce 10 still these PANS.
The effect un his system w,s as al.
parent ~ hrst IN his sensations aS IN his
appearance Relieved u tho burden
~ his Nnpuf'inons fcsh, ha coull walk
With apparent ease aud security The
body that hal oppressed him was nu
longer unwirlly and unmanag.ablc.
oheying his Will. II illlci him with lie
light And What - even more note
worthy than all the othcr results ot
The regimen tak"n together j.
that ihis disciplin, uf star
sa'inn and drastic dcpl-ti,e~
qnlrkened his brain to such degrec
that The man ~ intellect for the first
time kn"N him-"lf tn ho something far
hiThrr than man uf mere intellect
The goad- and Whips II the Regimen
hal All ricd the ner,o ou- system, w tina,
he hal become man of genius N,
hal gone io drugs aud starvation at the
lns'iga,ion ~ personal vanity Hence
fcrth he persisted IA using them for III,
sake oi the delight, ~ that highcsi III,
TO ~h'ch th y had raised HIM. and from
~a,"h he soon sunk surely aud quickly
Nttnnut tit.tg aaat.tuur.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
No Middle Names Wanted.

Two Christian names are one more
than any man, e,en one weighed with
the greatest responsibilities need have.
One Christian name is shorter, more
vigorous. takes less time to write, has
fewer iniiia's 10 mark on handkerchiefs,
and. in our judgment, makes an alto
gether more sensible sort of title than
William l.. Jones of Thomas q. J.
Smith Moreover, of the seventeen
men who have been elected to the Of
flee of rr, sidcnt. twelve, beginning
with George Washington and ending
with Abraham Lincoln, have had only
two initials.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Col. Ochiltree's Crest.
New York Worldl

Before leaving Europe, Col. Thomas
Ochiltree ordered crest and coat-of
arms to he made for himself at the
Herald's college, birmingham. Col.
Ochiltree appropriated the shield and
quarterings OF the late Baron Mum
chausen, which had a Babylonish Tyre
gules on argent and profile of An
anias proper. His crest is the arm OF
a cowboy grasping lariat, and issuing
from bale of Texas cotton.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Gods Country"
[Marshall's Army Life" ="

Tho name Gods country" became
ono in daily use in the army. There
was no thought of profanity in its
familiar use 1t was the one name that
clearly showed how the soldiers looked
upon the land of their northern homes
compared with the southern country in
which their active soldierins aas done.
In their opinion a name having abso-
lutely the opposite meaning woud be
the only one to describe the rebel coun-
try. OF course the feeling of dislike
related more to the people of the south
than to natures handiwork. In the
soldiers dictionary the name of Gods
country meant the land of oar north
eru homas
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Decapitated Insects,
[San Francisco Chroni Gle

I'San FTuHCSCO ChTOnl Gle
S. r. Canestrini has been experiment
ing upon the effects of decapitation
upon insects. Butterflies were able to
use their wings eighteen days after they
had lost their heads. Crickets leaped
on the thirteenth day after they had
been beheaded and the praying mantis
showed signs of life on the fourteenth
day after the head had been separated
from the body. He gives still more
singular observations, tending to show
that the head in insects cannot be sub
ject to the same perpetual strain as the
head In mammals in guiding the mo-
tions of the body.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
A sinking Mountain.
fDemorest's Monthly.

The mountain II Naiba. which is
about twice as high as the Crows Nest
on the Hudson, is gradually descending
into the bosom of the earth, deep ex-
cavation being formed all around it as
it settles. There is no volcanic acti n
accompanying it apparently. The
mountain seems to be gradually losing
its subterranean props.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Poets Progress.

Take the old ballads of any people, and few
adjectives will be found. The singer says,
"He laughed; she wept." Perhaps the poet
of more advanced age might say, "He
aughed in scorn; she turned away and shed
tears of disappointment" But nowadays
the ambitious young writer must produce
something like this: a hard, fiendish laugh,
scornful and pitiless, forced its passage from
his throat through the lips that curled in
mockery at her appeal; she covered her
despairing face, and gush and whirlwind
of sorrowing agony burst forth in her ir-
resistible tears"
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Another DefAulter.

In one of our horse-cars . small boy
was observed to be suddenly agitatsd,
but regained his self-control after few
minutes. Soon after the conductor ap-
peared and asked for fare. When he
stood before the shall boy there was q
slight pause, and the passengers were
surprised to hear the following
'Pleathe charge it to my papa. I've
thwallowed the money"
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
The Force of Habit.
lExchange.'

He was a very thoroughly reformed
gambler, and they were glad to elect
him q deacon of the church; but on the
very first Sunday that he assisted in
taking up the collection, when he met
the senior deacon up by the chancel, he
whispered softly: Bet you fifty even
t'l I've raked the biggest pot"
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

The Japanese premier. Prince Kung,
addressed Gen. Grant, when he was in
Japan, in English, so-called. Endeav-
oring to compliment him by assuring
him that he was born to command, he
said: ~Sire, brave generate, you vas
made to order"
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

Rochester Express "Piease give
me ~ cents to buy q drink II ~hiskyS'
implored . tramp. The money VAS
given him. snd lev moments later hs
WAS seen coming out Of . bake shop
with q loaf of bread under HI. arm.
Injiscrimina,e charity is 10 bs con.
demnc,l.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
An Orange Preseryatfye.

Two New Workers who are now in
Jacksonville, Florida, claim to have
discovered chemical process that will
preserve oranges and other fruits for
twelve months without impairing the
quality of the flavor
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Don't Get In the Habit.

Excuse me-" said polite citizen to a
colored man. Il didn't kick you on pur-
pose"
"No, sab, kicked me on de shin, sah.
'Scuze yer dis time, but don't git in de
habit oh it, sah."
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
4 tistir s.trt- idea.

'hNNhtss'r ~s'ntinrI
No, SAT- mamma. We can have
y" bl.a oi What tod ~; He - beyond
ohr c"mrr'h,h.inn Mamma r..
r'"d httl" i,iilh. n fink know what
p"'i 10 libe lilo must he like "a bi|op,
Only raIs hot quito 80 gwand"
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
a PrfeSt'a Salarv.

A French rural priests salary aver
ages $24O, of which half comes from the
state and half from the commune. He
pays no rent, and gets some presents oil
food usually.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

Chicago Weekly Magazine: With
the person who manifests any curiosity
about our private business affairs we al
ways need to be on our guard.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

Conn oginl for sins they are inclined to,
By damning those they have no lpind to.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28
Smoking In Mexico.
Cor. indianapolis Journal. ]


While waiting for coffee, and after
wards during pauses in the conversa-
ton, the gentlemen of the family and
not infreguently the ladies also-settle
gracefully back in their chairs and ell
JOY cigarette or two. l learned q les
son at my very first dinner in Mexico.
1t was at hotel table, and q stranger
Mexican seated beside me, who hap
pened to finish his dinner first, inno-
Gently lighted his cigar for the usual
table smoke, which l, in the depth of
my ignorance, regarded as personal
insult, and Indignantly left the table
Since that day have become "learned
in the ways of the Egyptians" and can
not only tolerate the national custom
with equanimity, but (be not Mortified,
o. astidious friends y occasionally take
a dinner cigarette myself! When one
is in Rome it is as we'll to do as the Re-
mans do.
These tiny Mexican cigarettes, rolled
up in corn-husks or tissue paper, are
not at all like the strong smelling
things We have in the United States.
These are not much larger than straws,
the husk is sweet to the taste, and they
have delicate fragrance which is very
pleasant. In Mexico everybody smokes
at all times and in all places-at the
theatre. in the ball room, everywhere
In making formal calls or more ex-
tended visits politeness demands an i'm
mediate and frequent exchange of
cigarettes and light with many
courteous words, Us ''after you. sonora"
(referring to the match)-precisely as
our ancestors were wont to proffer and
accept the civilities of tho snuff box
Every Mexican lady's pocket is supplied
with matchbox and cigarette-holder of
more or les elegance, and the dainty
fingers of many fair young senorita
are discolored like polished bronze at
the tips from much cigarette rolling
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

In Siberia the price Of Q first class
wife is eight sledge dogs.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

Al . recent reunion In Richmond the
bill of fare was printed on Ceafsdssts
a1O bi,'s
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

Arkansaw Traveller: De wise man an
de fool doan' quarrel, but two fools or
two wise men KANT get along 20 we'll.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1884-03-28

Chicago Herald: 1t is o great mis-.
fortune to poor man to be born with
the tastes of "ten thousand rear"
Press and daily Dakotaian. (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1880-1889, 1884-06-12
A Democratic Opinion

CINCINNATI Enquirer (Dem.): The
national republican convention yesterday
selected the Hon. James G. Blaine, of
Maine, as the candidate of the party for
the presidency of the United States. In
nominating him the convention has &C.
ted in accordance with the wishes of
nine-tenths OF the republican voters Of
the country. The nomination was there
fore popular one to make. BY this
nomination the pharisees and hypo.
critics of the party are routed and cover
ed with confusion. They made bitter
and unrelenting fight against him, but
their black flag had to come down. The
idol of the republican masses has ackiev.
ed most decisive victory. 1t remaine
to be seen whether the democrats, when
they meet IN convention next month
will accede to the wishes OF the people
as the republicans have done. Will they
put aside the trickstera, and chose q
man who IS of the people and for the
people? The nomination of Blaine anc
Logan yesterday makes it absolutely
necessary that they shall do this, or &C
down in utter defeat.
Press and daily Dakotaian. (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1880-1889, 1884-06-12

A Washington correspondent sends the
Bismarck Journal some gossip relative
to the coming man for Dakota's governor,
which runs through considerable list
of names. The interview was made
before the republican convention in.
structed the president to select officials
from the respective territories to which
appointments are made. This instruc-
ton wipes out many Of the names pre-.
sented. The position credited to the
secretary of the interior relative to bis
brother is susceptible of modifica.
ton. He feels natural delicacy about
endorsing member of his own family
for the place, but this may be overcome
by the strong Dakota endorsements Mr..
Teller is receiving. He is the only one
in the list of Dakota men whose appoint.
ment the people generally ask for, the
other nspirants being backed by outside
men. IT we are to have a home cover
nor, it should be one whom the people
elect by their individual recommends
tions. 1t is we'll known that Mr.. Teller
is not an aspirant for the governorship
rs he considers his present position more
pleasant aud more profitable. But he il
willing to take it it it comes on the re
qnest Of the people.
Press and daily Dakotaian. (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1880-1889, 1884-06-12

possibility of fraud. Permit me to call
the attention OF the gentlemen to one fact
BY this very amendment OF this home
stead law which you propose you pro.
vide the only method in which people
can acquire any Of the public lands,
that is under the homestead laws. All
over this country there are great many
poor people who have already had the
benefit of the homestead Law, but
through the vicissitudes of the hard
times and the struggles incident to q
new country, through mortgages, judg-
ments and otherwise, they have lost their
homestead claims. By your proposed
amendment to the Law these people
are utterly cut off from obtaining any
more OF the government lands, and II
they wish to secure home they must
purchase lands from third parties. 1
suggest whether it would not be better
to leave the pre-emption in force, but
change it as you have changed the CON-
mutation clause of the homestead law,
ana instead Of requiring Elk months set
tlement. make it two years or three
years, but leave the law upon your stat.
ute book 80 that people may obtain un-
der it some of the government land for
homes. l would also apply the same ar
gument to the timber culture law. In
our great west there are large, extensive
and almost boundless prairies. The OBJ
ject aud intent of the timber culture law
was to secure the growing of forests up.
on these prairies in order to build up
the country and make it hab,table. I
submit that the spirit of the Law was Just
and laudable. What we ought to de IN.
stead Of repeating the law is to amend
and modify it 80 as to cut off all oppor-
tunity for frauds.
Press and daily Dakotaian. (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1880-1889, 1884-06-12
DAK0TA's GOVERNOR,

An Interview Which is Not Truthful iu all
Respects.
Washington Correspondence Bismarck Journal.
"Have you made q governor for Da-
kota yet?' l asked Secretary Teller yes.
terday.
"Why, have you candidate?"
"Yes Sir, know man who"
"Ah. I'm glad of that. was afraid
we should run out OF candidates"
"Ordway's time out yet?"
Eyes, but he's been indicted and 1t
wouldn't be the fair thing to make the
appointment until the case is tried"
| carried away the impression that the
selection had not been made yet, but [
also entertained suspicion that the
secretary had not told me all he knew on
the subject. Having q curiosity to see
the papers of the candidates sought
them out and began looking at them. A
fussy functlonary having them in charge
grumbled about the irregularity of tie
proceeding awhile, and finally, Just as
my task was done, hauled me before the
secretary with charge that [ was rob.
bing the archives.
By far the heartiest and strongest
documents are those of Col. Lounsberry.
The most numerously signed are those
for Secretary Teller, Hugh Campbell
heading the list.
Col. Donan's list is headed by Con.
gresham Calkins and by Pettigrew.
Captain M. Flick, of Hillsboro, Dakota,
is backed by some one whose name I
have forgotten, never having heard of
the candidate or the backer before. He
was originally Pennsyl lvanian, 80 states
the letter, and he has been resident of
the territory three years.
Marcus Q. Cook, OF Massachusetts. ap.
plies for the governorship of Dakota
and files O formidable bundle of reco N.
mendations for the Boston postmaster.
ship. He seems to have failed in his
], quest for postoffice and utilizes bis pa
a pers thus.
George j. Denny, OF Kentucky, j.
backed by the republican state centra
!. committee Of his state.
/ Ex.Congressman N. G. Deering, ol
/ Iowa, has the endorsement of his stat.
delegation in congress.
y y. NJ. keils, clerk in the fourth audi
o tors Office in this city, and entirely un
;. known to local lame, is endorsed BY
i. several people who are equally unknown
A man by the name of L. j. Farwell
of Wisconsin, is strongly recommended
by man named T. H. Collins, (Tom
q who dates his letters from Bismarck.
q Then, there is great mass of paper
! filed when the Office was last approach
ing vacancy, and another mass TO
}. candidates at large. SO to speak; that ii
of men who desire to be governors bu
e are not particular what territory the
n honor, which 1 had no time nor incline
tion to examine.
Speaking of his brothers papers, Sec
: retary Teller said they were very hattel
:. ing, but he was not candidate aud thu
. he (my interlocutor) would not send hi
:. name to tie president.
= He expressed the belief that it woul
Z not be wise to select Dakotaian to til
y - office since sectional feeling ran 80 hig
&c that the administration of a man frol
> > north or south would be hampered b
y enemies from the other, and his life b
> made burdensome.
,ss No application from Governor Ordwa
, for reappointment has been filed and
is not understood that he is candida,
, for the Office.
Press and daily Dakotaian. (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1880-1889, 1884-06-12
THE LAND LAWS.

DiscussionsO Over the r re- -emption and Tim
Der Culture Acts.
Washington, June S-One of the first
things which will come up in the house
this week will be the bill to repeal the
pre.emption and timber culture laws
and to amend the homestead laws. The
bill was up in the house yesterday, but
no quorum being present no action was
taken. An important amendment, offered
by Mr.. Nelson, was agreed to. 1t pro-
vides that
All persons having the right of pre-
emption who have hitherto in good faith,
and in the absence of fraud, made settle.
ment on the public lands of the United
States conformable to the pre-emption
laws heretofore enforced, shall be per-
mitted to make final proof and entry of
the land so settled upon, not exceeding
l6O acres conformable to existing laws.
The principal argument used in the
discussion in favor of the bill, was that
the pre.emption laws as they now exist,
afford opportunity for fraud. Mr. Mel
son opposed the absolute repeal of those
laws. In the house yesterday he very
clearly expressed his views on the sub
ject. While he agreed that great frauds
and corruption had crept into our land
system, he thought that different mode
should be adopted to reach the evil. He
said there had been rs much fraud com
mitted under the homestead as under the
pre.emption laws. In fact, one feature
of the homestead law was identical with
the pre- emption law. He continued:
A man may go to the local land Office
and make an entry of homestead of
land, and, after having settled on it for
six months, he may commute his home
stead entry by going to the local land
Office and making final proof and pay
ment. The committee on public lands
have recognized that evil 10 this case,
and instead of repealing the home
stead law, they have changed the
period Of Communication from six to three
months. Now, I submit that the same
process ought to bs resorted to in the
case Of the pre- emption and timber cul.
ture laws; that instead of repeating
those laws they they should be amended
% you propose to amend the homestead
J laws, in such manner ~ to cut OF al