Seattle daily post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, W.T. [Wash.]) 1881-1888, 1884-03-12
CARL DUNOER N POLITICS.

In q recent letter to the Detroit Free
Press Carl Dunder says:
like to have you pat in your baber
dot | vhas not candidate mid sOme
bOlities dis fall, und like all my frients
tn dake particular notice.
Der last time We had some bolitics in
Detroit my old vhoinans says to me:
Carl Dunder, YOU look like Sheorge
Washington, you walk like Daniel Web
ster. and you slump off street car like
Henry Clay. Why doan you run NIT
bolltlcs ind pc some great MANI"
Well, | tink dot all over for five days,
und decide dot | shall run for some
office. tells ShOn Places about it. und
Shon comes init my saloon und drinks
four glasses of peer and wipes of his
shin und says:
Carl. my poy. you vhas cut oudt for
some Congressman. fix 1t dot you 90
to Congress und shteal, lie and loaf
aroundt ind pe a statesman"
He doan' bay for dot peer. but it vhas
all right, ind goes home und tells der
ole vhomans dot We shall soon pc In
Washington in grand shtyle. feels SO
pig dot | almost burst open, but Ill
abouet vheek dot Shon Places comes
III und prings four men init him. Each
man drinks tree glasses of peer. and den
Shon he says:
Carl. dis vas der Congressiona Al Com
mittee. We find dat der nomination
vas already promised to some odder
nan. Dot vhas all right, however.
Washington vhas "A badt place. und like
enough your ole vhomanS run tvhay init
der pig IRON ring. Katie goes i'll love
INIT dr. Standard OH Company, uHd
Shin Blaine puys you To vote mt der
Southern Pacific. II vhas pe.ter YOU 90
init der Legislature
Well. 4 feels badt "A leedle while, but
| thinks 1t vhas all right. l goes home
aud tells der ole woman dat We go init
Lansing. uHd put on shtyle and shNeil
aroundt like some lords. und she says
dot vos good enough for b-or folks. l
yos all settled down, und | tell all my
friendts, ven dot Shon Places vhalks
in one day init a crowd of fellers und
says
Carl, dis vhas der bone und sinew,
der toll hardened Taxpayers of Detroit.
We find dot you Who's left ON gong nit
der Legis. ature, und 50 We makes you
sheriff. Ii yhas pully good office. Ii
bays vhell. 1t will lift you oop init goot
society, und Inappe you half n chance
to be Postmaster afterwards. Hurrah
for Carl Dunder. our new Sheriff y
Nhell dat crowd dIiuks feefty glasses
of peer und doan tay me holdings.
90 home und tells der old vhoman dot
We doan go init Washington nor Ian
sing. put ve shtay i'll Detroit aud be-
come sheriff und lif NIT der shall. Dot
bleases her urd Katie. Der shall vas
handy to shtreet cars ali der rooms
vas large, und If We hat some company
nobody has to sheep on der floor.
tells ali der poys dat shas der boss of
der shall next time, und efererypody
drinks my peer und SAY dot l go III by a
million majority. Ii Vhas very nice
but purity queek dot Shon Places he
COMES aroundt NIT different grove
| und he says:
Gal Dunder, dis vhas der crowd dol
secures the sacrednsss OF der pailot
pox. Der pulwarks OF American lio
| erty are before you. We find dot yot
cont De sheriff. und so We runs you fol
alderman. Ii vhas all right. Der shai
vas oldt, und der sheriff must take or
his hat TO An alderman, or he doan ~
init an official excursion.
Vhell. dot crowd drink whole key o.
| peer mitout bay. und l goes home un
dells der oldt yhoman dot We vhas bust
ed. She says she like dot. When sh,
goes on der shtreet car eferypody say
dot vos Alderman Dunder's wife. uhG
she has free tickets mid all der minstre
shows und State fairs. ltink II all owe
uud l Who's glad. II | vhas an Alder
man schmeli some rats, you kaos, unc
| | have free passes, free peer. und II
doan like 4 man | open an alley INIT III
| door yard. Yes dot vhas right, but do
Shon Places comes once more init
hundred men behind HIM und says:
| Carl Dunder. beholdt som law un,
| order, Down NIT packed conventions
Down nit repeating. We find dot nom
ipation for AldsrmAns vas promised al
ready, und 50 We haf TO run you for con
stables. Hurfah for Carl Dunder, gu
next constables
"Vhell, dot vhas two kegs OF peer
und when goes home der ole vhoman
CRIES, Kate vhas madt. uud doan sleel
All night. In two days Shop Place
comes NIT a crowd ts SAY dot / can
be constable, but like enough VIA
poundmaster. when drives 'em all oud
una tells everybody dot / WANTS II
more bolitics. vhas too pure and oor
rrpht. Ii some of der poys like to COM
arounds dis fall und tell me vhas nn
man for Mayor | hat u shotgun INIT NV
barrels for him. | like efcrypody t
read nv letter und keep away uud saw
troubles