The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-03

The Hanson Cab.
"Tell, rode in a Hanson cab when
| [ yas in Chicago 'tother day." said an
| Dld kicker to another old kicker. rs they
! met in saloon for lunch at midday.
1.-THE streets are full of them. and they
make me laugh"
"What kind of things are they?"
, asked the second old kicker. II have
read about Hanson cabs ever since |
was a boy, in Dickens works, and ell
English publications. but 1 wouldn't
know one if L saw it in the road. What
do they look like?"
40, they look like the very deuce.
Take your top buggy and knock off the
front wheels. and ii.tch lie shafts on the
hind axle-tree, and put an oliice-stool
up behind the top OF the buggy, with a
driver screwed onto the top OF the stool,
with the lines running over the top to
the horse, and you would have Han
som cab. Hooked at lots of them, ard,
honestly. ] couldn't help laughing at
the imitation English affairs. Those
Gurneys that have been on the streets
Of Chicago for a year or two are bad
enough about shaking fellow up, but
the Hanson cab will dislocate man S
liver. and shiver his spinal column, and
scare him to death quicker than any
thing. You get in and there is q couple
OF doors shut in on your lap to keep
you from being shaken out. and then
the driver locks the doors and throws the
key away, and when you get to the end
of your journey somebody happens along
wish another key and lets YOU out. or
nay be the doors are locked with q
tlme-lock that opens when you get to
The depot. The driver sits up behind. as
stiff as a frozen pickerel, and I was told
by Palmer House liar that an
iron rod runs from the seat right up the
spinal column of the driver, to the top
of his head, where his hat, which has
an iron nut on the inside, screws on to
tne rcd and holds him tight. He looks
as though that was tie way he was
fastened On, but the fellow may have
been lying to me. The horse seems TO
know where you are going, and all the
driver does is to hold on to the lines.
l suppose he is up there so if the horse
runs away the driver could get off
without being run over. and 90 around
q block and stop the horse. In the
meantiile a passenger would be killed.
To ride along the crowded streets in one
OF the Hanson cabs, and see the horse
going through the crowds with no
driver in sight. makes you have respect
for the sagacity OF the horse, and vet
you feel as though even horse sense was
not enongh. and you are sure that he
will run into the next beer wagon that
comes along. You forget all about the
galvanized Epglishman perched upon
the shelf behind, and You feel like grab
bling the lines that pass over your head
and driving the horse yourself, and
when you stop to get out, and the
driver appears to open the door, you
look at him in astonishment, and say:
well, how did you get here, for
Heavens sake?" When the cab strikes
n rough place in the street with the
right wheel, your thigh bone goes right
up and knocks your ear around on top
Of your head, and you feel lop-sided
until the left wheel strikes something
and averages you up. Whe.- both
wheels strike an obstruction ut once,
the bottom of your stomach is struck
by your boot-heels and paralyzed, so
you can't eat ANYTHING but soup for
week, and your liver is Just as liable to
oe around by the small of your back,
or under your arm. as anywhere, when
you get to the depot. 1t is n lonesome,
melancholy feeling, to ride in Han
som cab. In any other conveyance
You can hail the driver and talk with
him, but to make the driver of Han
som cab hear YOU, you have to shout
against the side of a building, and de-
pend upon the echo coming back to the
driver and waking him up. II might
seem: rs though a Hanson cab would
be good thing for young fellow to
take mis- girl out riding in, if he wanted
to spark her, the driver being away
back behind and binders on the horse,
but it wouldn't be SAFE us the driver
has hole in the back of the top so he
can lo2k right through, aud he would
be sur g to keep awake if there was any
thing going on in the cab that the pas
sengers didn't care to have commented
on: besides. it seems as though the
weight of the vehicle was liable ut any
minute to raise the horse right off his
feet and cause him to sit down in Your
lap, and no fellow riding with girl
likes to have horse sit down in their
laps, when they become interested in a
The Hanson cab looks !
sort of tony, but man who rides in !
one feels as though he was marked.
Everybody looks at the rig and laughs,
anc the passenger feels uncomfortable. !
ThhSe cabs can never take the place of |
street cars. that is sure" and the old /
Kicker, who had rode in {. cab the day |
before, began feeling under his shout
der blade, to see if the calves OF his
legs were not beginning to work back
where they belonged.-Peck's Sun.