The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-10

they don't dare to grumble at my bin;
they expect it III be blythe papers
have prepared them to get a big bill
and haven't the heart to disappomt
'eln. II is MT in me-"
.sThem's my sentiments" chimed in
the Ice Dealer, who sat smoking in the
corner. sand that reminds me-" he
added, ,akiug out his notebook and
jotting something down. .that must
git them aoosepaper fellers to say
somethin' or other about the scarcity OF
ice on count of the unreasonable hot
weather."
There was pause in the converse
ton for minute or two. 1t was broken
by the Banana Skin, who remarked
somewhat irrelevantly: Business has
been awfulIy dull with me lately. That
Peach fellow has broken into my trade
fearfully. My commissions haven't
amounted to anything the last two or
three months. and the doctors say if l
don't give them more work they Ii close
the contract and 90 into partnership
with the Toy Pistol. l amt afraid,
though. They can't get along without
luz. anu tucy huOW IL.
whats thatP'' Who's talking about
meP" exclaimed the Toy Pistol, hear
ing his name mentioned.
II was only saying that you and the
doctors were getting quite friendly"
said the Banana Skin, quite deferen-
TALLY; for he stood in wholesome awe
of the Toy Pistol, who was a snappy
fellow and very apt to 60 off at half.
cock.
doctors be bowed" exclaimed the
Toy Pistol, contemptuously. "a fell
low has no use for doctors when I've
got through with HIM. I'm dead
shot every time, I am. No." he con-
tinued, in q m'lder strain, 81 don't
mind owning up that | make good
thing out of the undertaking profession.
My commissions thus far have been
something handsome, something hand
some" And smile of satisfaction
played around his muzzle.
.'By the way" whispered the Dude.
"what cweature is that over theref
Awfully vulgar looking person, dOn't
| yer know. She don't belong to Ou,
set. Wonder who could have admitted
herr
.'Oh, that" replied the Stovepipe
crooking his elbow disdainfully, 'H
| that upStart, Mother Hubbard, who has
forced her way into our circle. 1t Is
disgusting the airs these interlopers dc
, put on! I've been before the public
these ten years, and it's pretty tough i
I've got to stand aside just to SCOT hel
convenience.
.Let's not recognize her." said the
Vassar Girl in low tone to her mex
neighbor, the Chewing Gum. who hat
been in ever body's mouth for severa
seasons. and was particular friend o.
| the Vassar Girl.
Recognize her! The fright! I'm sure
l shan't. replied the Chewing Gum. 50
can't bear her."
At this moment the Mother-in-Law
! came in. Instantly every tongue wa:
stIlled and every eye lighted up with
alteration of the Oldest and most hon
ored member of the select circle. Tht
MOther-in-Law surveyed the listening
group for moment, and then said:
..My dear friends, why do you waste
your time here? The funny men of the
press are looking everywhere for you
and unless you 60 to them, they will bt
unable to write any of their dear, inim
liable paragraphs. Come! Away a
oncar'
They separated, and it is to be sup.
posed that they went Immediately Il
the newspaper Offices, for the next day
they were all mentioned by the funny
men as aforetime. Oyster, Ice Cream
Chicago Girls Foot, Plumber, Banan.
Skin, Peach, Toy Pistol, Dude. Stove
pipe, Vassar Girl, Chewing Gum, ant
last, but by no manner of means least
Motber-ir-Law-each and all had thei
rigbtful and immemorial place, and
their happiness would have been com
plete. but for the presence of that up
start and interloper, the Mother Hub
bard. She had come to stay.-Bosto'
Transcript.