New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1884-11-09
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

London physician hes discovered that there are SIX
deaths among 900 married mon. ten among the Same
of unmarried men, and twentynine In tho Same
number Of widowers.
Tho waste Of money in ths'prnting Of Congressional
read Is notorious The same evil exists 10 fully great
extent in England Tho list Of papers issued at tho
CLOSELY printed on folio paper takes up loZ pages:
More than half says an English paper arc useless ana
Of the remainder half spun out TO- double their
needful sisc. Tho taxpayer pays and windy orator:
md writers continue To pour out their endcss storo VI
words. Boston Journal.
The Literary World. in noticing OF Mr. r. p. Roe's
novels recently said: "wo understand that Mr. Roe's
estimate OF his novels is privately expressed to his
friends in about this language; 4" don't think they
amount very much but they secm TO sell pretty WE'LL"
Mr. Roo says that there Ia truth In this statement
Of deny" he says, "using any such language. and
have friends who would tolerate the IL boosted OF
pamIng on for money what regarded a. comparatively
worthless do not know what my books amount TO-.
limo and the public will sottc that question. 40
tho reviewers perfect right to crltioho my
books with the utmost severity and dosro honest opinion
above all THINKS but think that reflections on nm author
and his friends have place In a book revicw"
~The Prinoc Of walcs." says q Kentucky major who
recently saw him, mixes u good dcal with tho masses
aud In very democratic In hls manner Ito remembers
uamcs and aoos 40 vol and 40 pleasant that n hs we're
living In Kontnoky he would DO clootcd to tho Les'sat
uro Ito knows which sdc his broad IL buttored on
Ito seems 10 have sown his Wild oAs and has been be-
| having himself nrst-rate for nvo years"
~ don't know that It ia malaria that a. rm,ah
his hair aud over His sad sad eycs "Icswn't eat any
thing see-ah nv appetite Is so delicate +" TO
Have you tried snikers Baby Foodt" she mildly
suggested u ,o.,
quite and said he thought he would go home
| -ah."-lPittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
| Ben Perley Pooro thus describes Beau Hiok-
man as appeared in Washington during the Tyler Ad
minstration: "He was Of middle size, with long hair
and an noensive. cadaverous cOunenance 1t was his
boast that he born among the sashes of Hanover
County ya and he to be seen nunging about tho
hotels fashlonably. yet shabbily dressed generally
wearing soed white kid gloves and white cravat II was
considered the proper thing to introduce strangers 10 e
Beau who thereupon Initiation
fee and his mpudencesometimes secured him generous
sum. always ready to pilot his victims 70 gam
bling houses and other questionable resorts and for
quarter OF century he lived on the backmail thus
| levied upon strangers"
| Aningcnious reckoncr is woman who did a JOB OF
work for a Colege-st housekeeper this week She was
TO he pad - cents an hour. and had worked three
quarters of hour This IS how she did her ngurhg
One-ha Of % is -. Onehalf of 10 Is l. You owe me
| 20 cents missus."-I Lewiston Journal
The Rev watty Dunlop the humorous minister or
Dunfrcs Scotland had frequent practical jokes paycn
on him. but oxers rarely got the better OF him. On
occasion some idle and miscellaneous youths waiten LOT
him as he passed eough churchyard ana one OF Iheh
came to him. dressed ghost in hopes OF frightening
him. but Wattys cool accOst speedily upset the pan
"Wee Master Ghost" said he is this general rising
or are ye lust taking frac yer grave by yer
| sepT
Yes dear children" said Deacon Buckrag, address,
lug the sunday school III we are 5000 a9h rr WE
| shall all meet together In Paradise .,,.o
Vow children" he went on - want you all to tell
me- every Of you where we VIII meet again VIZ io
| good, and dutiful, and conscientlousf
Come, he said kindly "some OF you must certainly
"O know T. exclaimed little girl OF the back
| benches; it's purgatory detroit post.
| Doctor Well how are we to-day 7" Patient" Oh.
I'VE had miserable day. doctor" Doctor PUT your
wife saws YOU haven't groaned at all Oday while yescr
day" PATIENT" Good reason Thought there WASH .
| anybody round. That woman Is always taRihs ah un
fair advantage OF me- Boston transcript
| A gentleman In New-York receiving dispatch from
country friend asking to be told who had peeh eec'ou
in Heavens NAME" replied with the following travesty
| OF well known stanza;
| Some say that won.
| And some say that they won;
| And some say that bOth won tue day. mon.
That on lection day. mon.
| A battle was lost and won, mon
Don't turn in and advotats underground telegraph
wires In the OF the next 200 years wheh ms
country has been denuded of forest the supply OF tee
graph poles will be large enough to Keep the oven not
until genus comes to the 'front.' WIFI arIhcai eo'""o'
--[Derot Free Press
There Is q religious sect in Ohio called the Amish who
have been banging their hair for $50 years prolos
sonal BARRIERS scorned ana fathers cur tne w.,
hair perform the same ceremony lot the
fathers Beginning at the temple the shears are run I'D
direct line the ear ana down the meek, tnen,e up
the other To tile other temple ana thc icsu' 10
most beautiful bang. Boston Journal.
There IA not a steam nre-engne In the whoe OF it!'
| Little engines with hand pumps are still used
"wc usc no oeomargarinc here" the alluring sign
displayed in front OF restaurant that attracted ina
| hungry traveller. But thore was no mistaKhS tnc
fictitious nature OF the butter placed before hin anu he
| angrily addressed the proprietor:
| thought said YOU used no oeomargaIlnci
| Neither do" placldly returned the resaurateu'
| whats that. theni'
| "Olcomargarine.' ,.,.w
| No air. | don't. give 1t to my customers to use'-
| [Pittsburg Chroniclc|Telcgraph
There Is parish in England when contains ohy 70"
persons yielding its rector an income OF Toooo yea.
Sometimes the parishioners attend dissenting place OF
worship in body on sunday and then the rector CLOSES
the church, goes home and puts on MS ureSS"s so""
| and slippers for the rest of the day
rh. ,orov,ne advertisement appears I'm Boston
| noner :" Found on Cambridgc-st. Cambrdgeport =
cheese Tie owner have the same by calling at enc
~. have always thought that grocers ought to tie up
their chceses; they arc very APT 10 WALNUT U" INV" wv
Streets Burlington free frcsS
When Won write Rush on telegram the CLERK secs
at once that 1t is Important lie PUSHES II 10 ah o".
thc orerator rushes II over the wres the rccelfiiA
onertor t snntlon PUSHES II on TO paper puts u II
an envelope With rush. and hands u 10 ,,SSenec
boy There the rushing stops -lfhiiddcpma '''
Mr. Ruskin remarked In one OF his recent lectures;
do not sneak OF the Celtic race because should now We
eyprcted TO say Kettle and don't mean 10. II ony io
fear that should next DO required To say ST. heli'a
| Waterbury American
| AMERICAN ART GALLERIES.
This is the first time that the American pict
o ,ro,, tha Salon have been exhibited collection II