The Delaware ledger. (Newark, Del.) 1879-19??, 1884-04-19

NJ. Anatole Dulac of Paris advertises
himself as the professor Of new art
that of teaching parrots. As a rule, 1t
is the safest course to educate ones own
parrot. Ready-made elocutionists are
not always reliable. The lady president
of a suburban Dorcas Society, who buys
pretty poll from apoor seafaring man,
is liable to be shocked some time or an
other by the racy language of the fore
castle, and the parrot that has had its
schooling on board Thames barge is
apt to have an inconyenient memory for
phrases which had much better have
been forgotten.
The Partisan professor would, of
course, instruct his class of birds ia
none save the most genteel Of phrases.
But parrots, no doubt, talk at random,
and say more than they have been
taught-and nine times out of ten the
most irrelevant confectionery now and
again hitting on a remark which comes
in so exquisltely pat for the occasion
that every one is astonished. The fact
is, our world is very small, and, like the
FOOLS so, Lord, strip it will be found
that a man might really get through life
with very few sentences indeed, and
yet be considered of an average intel
lect.
A parrot has only to 60 on saying a
silly thing upon every opportunity that
offers, and the right chance is certain
to come round at last, when its silly
speech at once becomes the happiest
possible. For instance, there was a
bird that said nothing but "Here's a
pretty go!" and TINS was, as rule, nell
Their opposite nor funny. But one day
the poor thing fell out of cab window
and the wheels of another cab passing
at the time crushed its cage. A specta-
tor picked up the parrot, very much
alarmed, but not hurt, and, hearing 1t
murmur something, put the bird to his
ear, when to his establishment the thing
in a detected voice, whispered: "Here's
a pretty gol'' Nothing could have been
more exactly in sympathy with the situ-
alton or more innocent. But this is not
always the case.
The respectable maiden lady who pur.
chases a sailors parrot is liable, on the
slightest provocation, or none at all. u
find herself addressed, even in the pre-
sence Of the clergy, in the gruffest anC
strongest language of boatswain
Parrots have no respect for select com
pany. They scatter their nautical term
broadcast upon the just and upon thu
unjust. upon the butchers boy when h.
calls for orders and the new eurate whel
he drops in for afternoon tea. Like tn
Afghans, If they have a charge in thei
guns they must fire it off. 1t does nc
matter what they fire at in the least;
there is nothing better they will blaZ
away at blank wall. They shoot thei
arrows, as the prince does III the fair
tale, at random, and by-and-by when h
comes to pick them up he finds that Oh
has pierced the heart of his yenerab
grandmother. So with the parrot.
let's fly its familiar quotations. {
every mark or at none, and the tin
comes some day OF other when it infic
a mortal wound upon tine susceptibility
that are slow to recover from SUE
shocks. So, as rule, it is the wise
plan to educate ones own parrot.
This is not, of course, very easy to d
for young parrots of a suitable educ
oiOnal age are not abundant in the Bri
ish isles. Yet When juvenile the bird
very impressionable. Adult, 1t is liat
TO be obstinate, and, like the pro-
Bnton who refused to truckle to t
German system of genders, it oltentim
learns new language very imperfect
The old birds, indeed, show sxtraordi
aryantipathles to syntax, and get Will
on their heads about the construct
of sentences which the utmost patier
or violence, as the case may be, lspow
less to dissipate. You cannot disabl
an old parrots name of an error thai
has once cordially entertained. 1t /
its own ideas of grammatical prophet
and clings to them Ike limpet. Y
cannot shake it on matter of Engli
You may teach it another phrase al
gether, but it will not forego the fl
1t will tag the two together and I
them up-like the Protestant kettl
of the immortal Barnaby's raven
this compromise is the best terms
will make with the bird.