News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1884-09-25
TO WOULD-BE RUNAWAYS.
THE BEST CURE FOR THE DISEASE
KNOWN As ''SWELL-HEAD."
Sage Advice to Youthful Aspirnnts for
Greater GIOries than they Have ~
Home.

from the Detroit Free Press.1
Come, now, my lad, but you want to
run away. No boy ever yet reached the
age of Is without having several tunes
firmly resolved to leave home. When a
boy has made up his mind to thing OF
this sort he ought to carry it out by all
means. The first step in the programme
is to begin saving up bread and meat.
When you have a bushel or so OF pro
visions hidden in the barn or under the
woodshed. you are ready for the battle
with the cold world. Make your start
at night. This will prevent the sun
from tanning your complexion, and you
will be quite certain of the company OF
a tramp or two.
Some boys leave q note pinned to the
pillow of their bed. This note goes on
to say that the boy has been lawed,
bulldozed, starved, pounded, knocked
down and dragged out, until he has
made ND his mind to sever the cOnnec-
ton. He will never be heard of more.
1t is probably the best way to leave
note of this kind. as the family are then
made to fully realize their cruelty IN drlV-
ing the poor boy out among strangers
When you have packed up your little
bundle and are off, it will be well to set
tie upon some plan for the future. Per-
haps you want to be sailor =? Nothing
is easier. Make your way to some lake
or seaport, and most any captain will
take you. If he can't disgust you with
| the sailoring business in about week,
tar buckets, seasickness, poor provisions,
and a ropes end will be called upon to
assist him.
Perhaps you want to become a mighty
hunter2 Mighty hunters are not made
| in a few days or weeks. You want to
begin by letting your hair and finger
nails grow, sleeping in swamp, and
wasting $40 worth of ammunition to kill
ten-eent chipmunk.
| If you have decided to become bank
clerk, well aud good. Make tracks for
the nearest city, and the first bank you
enter will jump at the chance Of employ
ing you at 5000 per month. If it should
so happen that the bank didn't do any
jumping as you made your applica ion,
you can console yourself with the reAec-
ton that it is about to bust.
| But, speaking in all seriousness, my
boy, if had a dozen sons L should be
| glad to have each and every one of them
take his turn at running away from
| home. 1t is the best cure in the world
| for that disease called ''swell-head -
There's heap of romance in the idea
| of running away. You think of the
! sparkling sea, the green prairies, coral
strands, robbers caves, and pirates
treasures. You feel that you know so
much more than your father that it is
waste of brains for both of you to re-
main in the same house. You have
been forced to go to school, and have
been ordered to split wood, and to go to
slave. Don't stand it any longeri Pick
up your buds and leave the house and
go forth into the world.
What! Come to q full stop in the
road before you are mile away You
have got peck or more. of sour meat
and mouldy bread int pillow cases, even
teen cents in your pocket, and just
think how your father and mother have
misused you at home The romance be-
gins to wear off, Ell? You don't care
half as much about mermaids and palm
groves and pirate ships as you did an
hour ago. You hate to leave mother
after all, and perhaps father isn't SO
much to blame for bosslng you around.
Come to think it all over, perhaps you'd
better return home and try and stand il
for few more weeks.
All my son, but we've all been
there All these wrinkled and dignified
and baId-headed old men you meet on
the streets have had about the same ex-
perience. We've had that same period
of ''swell-head," and eight out of ten OF
us have packed our bundles and slid out
to escape parental tyranny. Eight out
Of tan or rs have slirped back again,
F. too, aud Ghe experience was the right
sort of foedicine for the disease. Any
time you come to feel that you are a
poor, oyerworked and downtrodden bOY,
and if you had only fair show you'd
know more in a minute than your father
does IN all hour, just skip. There's
nothing like it.