The Hazlehurst signal., 1884-02-21
TIE TARANTULA's BITE.

TIE TARANTULA'S BITE.
Among all my acquaintance. none
seemed happier than Eugene F.
named him Foriunc'S Favorite. lie had \
beautiful and highly accomplished wife;
his childrca were the prcltiest and the
best hammered have ever met. All the
women considered Mrs. F ~ nearpcr
fcctiOn ~ mortals can achieve; all the
men voted Eugene F-as clever man
n one could desire tn claim fellowship
with. lie was rich in associations. in
the integrity of name that commanded
the respect Of four generations. How
few aspiring Americans can say ~
much? lie possessed the advantages
of a liberal education; his place was
assured rs we'll rs IL IL possible to AS
sure ANYTHING in country where the
wheel Of fortune oblitcratcS the accumu.
lations and regulations OF generations.
ity in day. That is To say. the COM
pany that employed him was the oldest,
most reliable, AMI the richest organila-
ton of its Kind in the country. Final
IN. in addition To n salary of three
thousand year. Eugene had good rca-
son To- count upon an Inheritance in the
near future that would render him in
dependent.
The noteworthy trait fellowship with
Eugene F revealed was his equablc
spirits, born. rs he asserted. OF content
mcnt. lie was satisfied with his place.
his belongings and cnioymcnts. No
man had more To make him happy. he
said. No man cnIoyed life more philo-
sophically. or fretted himself less over
the biz or little things beyond his con-
troll. II was this equipoisc, and,
doubtless. his ignorance of the trials
and bitter experiences of less favored
people. that rendered Eugene F in
different when the misfortunes and
temptations of the poor were discussed.
Generous Ia fault. he was unable 10
comprehend the dire necessities that
drive the unfortunate 10 desperation
and death. lie was seyere-could with
difficulty lind language strong enough
TO express his contempt of the average
suicide.
A poor man who sought employment
aud failed To find il, weary with fruit
less effort. despairing under the worlds
rebuils. plunged recklcssly into tho UNI
known. The means employed empha-
sized the poverty 81 the wretched Great
urc. The newspapers made much oil II.
IL was the item of the day, and proved
n base for columns. dropped in on
Eugene one day when his hours work
was done. lie had newspaper In his
hand. He threw il down impaticntly,
ancrily. rs he handed me cigar and
pushed me into n seat. saying:
~ am disguised with you newspaper
men. Why do you give so much prom
inencc and space TO that horrible sui
eide. BY all accounts. tho fellow did
all that was left him TO do. II he had
only displayed common sense. when he
was about il. and adopted easier means.
II man must kill himself. why does he
disfgurc himself. or impose unnecessary
and horrible agonies such as this poor
wretch inflicted upon himselfH'
Aside from the fact that have no
patience with the speculation and theo-
~ that cuts ground from under every
Christians feet, / was tired. Eugene
worked an hour every day. worked.
ON an average, twelve at least, and did
more in one hour than Eugene did in
three. Since IL was clear To- mo that he
received nj least ten times more for his
mental toll than did. could afford TO
permit him tn indulge himself In n pro-
ionged dissertation Of the survival OF
the iittest." II pleased him and amused
me.
.Now," he said. at the end Of n chap
n htss RhnnsAx
Kill himself, let Ia say with rat poison,
should be- regarded rs much above n
rat. Here is another account, in this
mornings paper. OF woman who held
her head in tub OF water until she
drowned. Tell me woman who does
that l. entitled to tho benefits Of the
nineteenth century! Why. IL such peo-
plc were fairly balanced ON the fence
round Heaven, they would hang with
their heads downward of choice. HUI
man tadpvles. all Of thcm"
Eugene had n horror OF death; ocme-
tcries were his special aversion. He
was never known TO attend funeral.
lie could not bring himself TO witness
the ceremonies in the house or ut the
grave. He had n prejudice against
burial
"why can't everybody have vaults,
with nice. pleasing colors on the walls
have the Interior as well as the exte-
ri6r ornamented. and made so attrac-
tive that people going into them would
feel rs they do when they enter an at
trsctiye chamber. with bed in it9'
"Do you mean the dcad?"
"You know we'll enough 1 refer to
yisitofs-to the living"
II am afraid."l could not help say
inc, grayely. "you have yet TO learn.
Eugene, that not all the religion, all
the learning and all the philosophy in
the world can never make death other
than death"
"BuC that Is no reason why every
body should make death So horrible and
grisly. They make IL CHASTITY, and in
the same breath tell you Il is the way TO
Heaven. The way TO Heaven ought TO
be beautiful"
"Have you forgotten Pilgrims Prog
RESP"
"a piece Of rank plagiarism. The
idea Is thousands Of years old"
"why do We introduce discords in
music?"
''Nonsense! I'll name you thou
sand pieces famous compositions -
without discord." Eugene answered.
The fact is. the world doesn't believe
what II processes"
"Why don't You advocate crcma-
tion9" l rctorted. IF your theory Is
correct, burn 'sm all up; burn the