, 1884-03-14
TEMPERANCE TALK
Some Very Appropriate Suggestions and
Some Not Quite So Appropriate.


Of the Women's Christian Temperance
Union, vas held at the Methodist
church last evening. Mrs. McCandlish,
who presided, read an editorial article,
contained in the columns Of the Chi
cago Evening Journal, showing that
sentiments in favor of temperance and
prohibition were fast spreading all over
the country.
Rev. MI. Gage, Of Greeley, rejoiced
in the fact that the ladies' union had
done far more for the temperance
cause during the past ten years than
any other one agency. The seeds which
they had sown would bring forth much
good fruit. In his opinion, one Of the
greatest evils of intemperance grew
out Of the system of social treating,
which he strongly condemned. He
favored the creating of a public senti-
ment, especially with the children,
which is nj of the most efficient
methods to counterfeit the i'll effects of
the liquor traffic. He believed in rails
ing the fallen, but stil more in pre-
venting people fIom falling through in
temperance.
Another clerical gentleman made a
few remarks, in which he suggested
that the Mohomedans are away ahead
of the Christians in the matter of ig-
noring all intoxicating liquors. They
set an example which is. well worth re-
garding.
A Mr.. White referred to the method
in which the influence of saloons is
being rendered nugatory in Arkansas,
the three mile law" which is to the
effect that no saloon can be maintained
at any point within three miles of a
school house. He valued the efficacy
of this measure, and he urged another
to the effect that all young ladies
should insist upon their gentleman
callers taking the alternative of the
mitten or the pied ge.
Rev. MI: Eldridge expressed the be-
lief that intemperance should be com
batted in the most practical way. To
this importand end, reading rooms and
lunch room might be filled up, where
a large cup of coffee and a good
served sandwich could be secured
for a nickle each, and a big bowl of
soup at the same rate. Such places
could be made more than s~elf-support-
ing, whilst neutralizing the effect of
saloons and liquor selling restaurants.
1t was his hope that a movement to
this highly important end would, ere
long be inaugurated in Cheyenne, as
by these means many temptations now
surrounding men could be removed
and they would be placed in a
purer social atmosphere.
AT this juncture, Rev. Mr.. Brown
said that he had a paper-wad which he
intended to fire off. He fired it; and 1t
seemed as though it had been soaked in
concentrated gall. 1t appeared to be
more vicious than the worst red-eye
rot-gutt.ever unbottled upon the Lara
mic plains for the benefit of confirmed
topers who don't enjoy anything short
Of double-breasted chain lightning or
~rip-roaring gutter slush. The wad
was directed more especially against the
Sun-from Brother Slack, its publisher,
down to the poor printers devil who
inks the rollers when the edition is
worked off. The wicked reporter of
that wicked sheet came in for the
clerical, gentleman's especial wrath
which he frequently unbottled. 1t was
evident that the Sun had shined in the
wrong direction when Rev. Brown was
basking in its unwelcome rays.
The LEADER came in for a slight side
thrust. The speaker thought that one
of its editorials smelt slightly OF the
whisky shop. Probably Brother Brown
had the catarrh or had been indulgipg
in Limberger cheese at his evenings
meal and hadn't used any liquid strong
enough to n~eutralize the odiferous
scentings Of his delicate breath. He
said he never had been a drinker.
Once, when a boy, he got down into
the cellar and tapped some choice
liquid old rye with a rye straw. For
doing this, the next day, he got lam
basted. Then he did not look upon the
barreled tempter until he had closed his
army career. With an aching
head and dIsordered stomach he struck
Baltimore. Then he struck a grog
shop and asked for some of the worst
grog it could dispense over its bar. He
got it, paid for it and drank tia whole
tumbler full. Inside of twenty minute
he and his grog parted company. 1t
evidently didn't set well upon his deli
cate stomach. That settled it with
him. The money and the whisky were
wasted and his headache gone. In
twenty minutes, he took the train north
and emigrated speedily, a wiser and a
better man, for since that inauspicious
day, he has never wrestled with the un-
certain contents of a black bottle. He
is to be congratulated upon this, and
we presume the Sun will pay him its
respects this morning in words more
pathetic than polite. We wish him
much success in wrestling with sin and
satan, and hope that he will clinch a
regular old collar and shoulder grip
upon those demons and throw them
higher than G%ilderoy's kite ever as
cended in the ETHEREAL atmosphere sur