The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1884-10-18

which was his proper fare, paying the extra
sixpence out of my own pocket | got in
side Just in time to see the servants knock
ont two of the balusters with the biggest of
the boxes | implored them to be more
careful, and they accordingly avoided the
balusters, and thenceforth confined them
selves to knocking holes in the wall and
tearing jagged pieces out of the paper as
far as the second floor. With this excep-
ton, nothing particularly distressing oc-
Cured that evening, but the very next
morning mamma-in-law made her appear
ance at breakfast (rather late) in flannel
dressing-gown and curl papers. Now, if
there is anything 1 hate more than flannel
dressing gown it is curl papers; and if there
is anything l hate more than curl papers
it is flannel dressing gown. 81 make
myself quite at home, my dears, you see, "
was her first greeting, shaking her curl
papers as she was wont to do her curls,
though by no means with the same effect.
| thought she did, confound her, but [
swallowed my annoyance, and ventured to
hope she had slept WELL No, if she must
tell the truth (which she needn't have
done on my account, I'm sure), not very
well. She never did like those new-fangled
spring mattresses. Nothing like her old
fashioned bed at home for her (The re-
tort was obvious, but, of course, | didn't
make it, And then, again, she couldn't
help thinking that the sheets were not
quite aired, and there was certainly a,
draught from the left-hand window. |
promised that all these little matters should
be seen to, and asked if might help her
to an egg or rasher of bacon. "Thank
you, no, I'm really afraid-eggs make me
bilious and bacon always disagrees with me;
but if you happen to have such thing as
bloater in the house now" OF course
we didn't happen to have such thing in
the house, but l promised that our estab-
lishment should be kept permanently pro-
vided with bloaters for the future, and the
dear woman kindly accepted three pork
sausages as a temporary substitute. q
may mention incidentally that ordered
quarter of hundred of real Yarmouth for
her the very same day. She ate two of
them, and then discovered that bloaters
made her so dreadfully thirsty. No other
member of our household cared for them,
and the remaining twenty three, after giy=
ing sort of sea air to the establishment
for a fortnight, were ultimately given to
the milkman.)
The first thing after breakfast the dear
creature said sweetly Snow, Rosie, my
love, give me your keys and I'll set your
store cupboard to rights for you. don't
intend you to be bothered with any house
keeping during the week or two | am with
you" Mark the delicate crescendo-she
only said one week at first, but now 1t had
got to week or two. Ny poor little wife
looked rather crestfallen, for she enjoyed
the discharge of her new duties as mistress,
but the habit of obedience was still strong,
and she was about to hand over the insignia
of authority when l came to the rescue.
''No, no, mamma; that won't do. Rosie
makes a capital little housekeeper, and l
want her to have as much practice as pos
sible. She must hustle about more than
ever during the short time that you are
here q thought that was rather neatly putt,
so that she may have the full benefit of
your experience" Rosie gave me CRATE
full look and pocketed the keys again, while
Mrs. D. tried to look as if she didn't mind
in the least and wagged her curl papers
more playfully than ever.
started on my daily round, to look in
at the hospital and call on my few patients,
and did not return until dinner time. My
little wife came out to meet me in the hall
with by no means her usual smiling face;
indeed, it struck me that her eyes were
little red, I did not make any remark
until we were left alone, Then inquired
the cause. The poor little woman tried
hard to maintain her composure, but it was
not until after she had had a good cry on
my shoulder that I extracted from her, by
degrees, that mamma had been ''going on"
at her so, telling her that she did pretty
nearly everything wrong, that she felt quite
discouraged and miserable. l comforted
her as best could. The dinner, for the
first time since our marriage, was a failure;
and Mrs. D. did not improve matters by
remarking, in her sweetest manner, that
she feared all along it would be so. If
dear Rosie had only taken her advice, and
hadn't done this, and had done that, and
had been leetle more particular about
something else, all would have been as it
should be. OF course, took my wife's
part, and testified that up to that day the
cookery had always been perfection. Mrs.
d. drew herself up, and for the remainder
of the meal retired within herself, from
which dignifed but constrained position it
took three glasses of my best Madeira to
extricate her.
We had hitherto been accustomed to
have little music every evening, but we
were debarred from that pleasure by Mrs.
d. taking possession of the sofa in the
drawing-room and going to sleep immedi-
ately after dinner 1t struck me that if
she objected to the sound of the piano she
might as well betake herself to some other
room, and | tried few chords, to see if
she would take the hint and retire; but she
merely opened her eyes with the air of
saint in the act of martyrdom, and family
remarked that she feared one of her dread
ful headaches was coming on again. Of
course, under such circumstances, music
was out of the question, and my reading
aloud to my wife, which was another of
our enjoyments, was equally tabooed. In
desperation | limited to Rosie that we had
better return to the dining but the
sleeping beauty ON the sofa languidly OPEN
ed her eyes and said, ''Pray keep me COM
pany, my dears; assure you you don't
disturb me in the least, which, if snoring
is sign of undisturbed repose, we certainly
didn't. She continued to dose for the re-
mainder of the evening; but if by chance I
pressed my wife's hand, or ventured on any
other conjugal endearment, one eye of the
sleeper would slowly open and gaze at me
with an expression-I hardly know what
xpression-but the effect was awful. No
one who hasn't tried it can imagine the
nameless horror, the uncanny and witch
l.I-o &Lnk II