Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1884-09-25
HUArOR OF THE DAY.
A HAPPY PROSPECT.

A HAPPY PROSPECT.
fDear Amanda, it's all right. Wen
get married before Christmas" said Mr..
Ernest Heidelsnapper.
"But you told me last night" said Miss
Amanda PschOddy, that you were too
poor to marry"
30, yes, 1 know Amanda dear" he
said, Selling her hand gently, "but it viii
soon be all right, and then we Will be
welded, and our hearts will beat as one,
and we Will 60 to the beautiful Canadian
land and live IN chateau, and have
horses, and servants, and -"
'HOW good you are" sighed Amanda,
laying her head upon his shoulder. "But
L thought you were so very poor Err
est?'
$50 I am, dearest" he said, "but I've
been appointed cashier of the Sixteenth
National Bank, and viii begin business
tO-mOrrOW.-N Y. Truth.
THE BORROWING FAMILY.
The borrowing family sent their boy
Jack over to Mrs. Murphy's to borrow
some tea and sugar and a plate of butter.
Mrs. Murphy was busy, and had no in
clination to lend to neighbOrs who never
returned anything they borrowed. At
the same time she did not care to entire
| ly offend them.
"Id be glad to accommodate yees,
she said, politely, "but DIM in hurry
and haven't time to wait on ye. I've 9th
er fish to fry just now"
The boy went home and reported that
/ Mrs. Murphy was too busy to attend to
/ him, and that she had other fish to fry,
/ etc.
'And why didn't ye waltz" asked his
! mother, breathlessly. $50 back and take
I p, E-TT
Murphy you're IN no hurry, and moth
er'd be much obliged to her for plate OF
/ the fried fsh!'
ROLLING IN WEALTH.
Proud Father-Never, child, never
! The idea of the daughter of a rich banker
! throwing herself away on a poor man
! You must marry wealth or not at all.
/ Pleading daughter-But, pa, AlphOnsO
/ is not poor.
mot poor? How can he be other
wise? Break off the engagement with
out delay"
But he is wealthy-very wealthy.
pa
GLOW can a Summer hotel proprietor
/ be wealthy after such a season as this
/ I'll warrant he hasn't got five cents to
! his name"
''But, pa, he is not a hotel proprietor
I
| Here is his card, 'AlphOnsO De Blank
! Whitecap Hotel"
81 know, bat he is not the proprietor
"W hat is he, then ?"
! "The head-Waiter."
"Oh That is different. Bless you
my children
/ SHE MADE him THINK so.
"And so now they're engaged? Well
| Jessie, to think of you, with your beauty
! and accomplishments and your lovely
voice, being cut out by such an Ignorant
! little fright as that Maggie QuicksOn
You sang to him, I SUPPOSED"
! Yes, mamma, by the hour. But she
made him sing, you know, and played
his accomplishments for him."
"Why, can he singT
mo, mamma, but she made him be
ieve he could. "-LOndOp Punch.
HE WASN'T THE KID.
Boy!" he called as he snapped his
fingers at a pOstQffice bOOt-black, care
you the boy I handed a dollar bill t.
yesterday to get changed, and you beat
me out Of thirteen cents ?'
Look out How do you know yor
ain't?'
cause; do I look like a boy who'C
beat you out of a shilling when I coulC
walk off with the dollar! Stranger, yoU
must have got hold of some poor Ieetlt
kid who's just begun bizness P'-Dstroi
Free Press.
a CONSIDERABLE DIFFERENCE.
i New York Broker-NO, dear, I cannor
take you to Saratoga this year.
His Wife-YOU can't, indeed? should
like to know why?
" can't afford it."
The idea! Why, the Simpersins are
going to Newport just the same as usual
and Simpersin has failed too"
Exactly, my dear, and / haven't"
"WelI ?''
''Why, I have to stay at home and pay
/ my debts. Philadelphia CAL.