The Russellville Democrat., 1884-05-29
ELEVENTH YEAR.---NO. 19.
Obligations of Guests.

hCAV CNtoeo hO Ntt ACO oA that should warrant an unannounced intrusion into the house of friend or relative unless it is an understood hold and the visitor that he or she can come and go at will. regardless of the condition of the family or the home.
 An ace eidcntal visitor, who perhaps has just heard of friends wherea- bouts in passing through city, should he made welcome, for surely the visit is as unexpected to the guest as to the host aud hostess; but there is no excuse for premeditated sweeping down into the centre of the family circle with out saying ''by your leave,' particu- larly when invited guests are in the house or are daily expected.
 Very disastrous results have trans pired from unannounced visits, as in the case of lady who. with her three children, ''surprised'' dear friend and wondered at her pained and em- barrassed greeting until informed that two of her children were seriously i'll with scarlet fever, and although the visitors remained but few moments in the infected house all three of the children caught the fever. One died, while another was for years a sufferer from consequent troubles with head and throat
 One can easily imagine the morsiiica- ton Of two young sisters who came 8 great distance, upon a general invitation given months before, to pay an extend- ed visit to schoolmate, and upon going bag and baggage to the house found the family had removed six weeks previously to city very much nearer their own Western home, and there they were, friendless in a strange city, without money enough for re- turn ticket home.
 Upon investigation 1t will be found that people who make such forced vis- it's have generally some ulterior object in view, and reaching out for it they make conyeniences of their relatives and friends without thought of either incommoding others or of adapting themselves to the rules and regulations of the household
 ..I dreaded to have her come" said dear little inexperienced house. mother, with two small children, when | referring to fashionable young rela- tive she had in courtesy invited to visit her. But" she continued, s'after the first day dreaded to have her go, she seemed to fit in so nicely.
 ..Of course she helped you great deal" suggestively said the friend "Well. noif renectively answered the little lady, "She did not, and yet, since 1 come to think of it, she did. She was always ready for her meals, and in the morning when she walked out for her health, she took the children with her for company and you don't know what relief it was! Why, l l made the work fly while they were l gone, and when they come back you would have laughed to hear her prac- tice, as she called playing and singing an hour at time, with the children sitting as quiet as small mice."
 Have company and go out?" "Yes, surely, for the young lady was really fashionable, and so were all her friends; but her callers always asked for Ross and me, to show our approval of her company and we would go in the draw ing room for a while, and once she in- sisted on my going out riding with her and gentleman friend, whom we af- terwards invited to stay to dinner be- cause he was so kind. and he is now one of our most valued friends. Yes" she sighed, .'when Lilly left, felt awfully lonesome and the children 1 cried.
 Young ladies who are supposed or | profess to have been most carefully trained and guarded at home some times utterly ignore all rules of society. the laws of good-breeding and eyei show themselves deficient in innate pc liteness when visiting. In all cases the host and hostess take the position of parents or guardians to the guest, who Is placed under their protection, and 1t is a mark of courtesy, if nothing more, for gentleman caller to ask for the heads of the household either before or when he sends his card or name to the guest.
 He may be engaged to the young lady"
 Then the gentleman has . greater reason than obeying the dictates of po- litenes for placing himself and his fun oee in the correct position in the eyes of her protectors pro tenn, and very few men are selfish enough to desire their future wives to become the vic tims of distrust and suspicion by their disregard of the laws of society.
 Again, gentleman has very slight sense of propriety who will keep : young lady up until twelve o'clock at night, in strange house, while the weary hostess, whose usual hour for retiring is ten o'clock, sits up, impa- tiently waiting to close the house. Not only are these late hours to be con demned, unless justified by an engage ment acknowledged, and permission granted by the lady who takes tho place of mother to tho young girl, but still greater breach of courtesy, even if engagement exists, is to close the parlor door, thereby not only shut ting out callers on members of the fami- ly, but placing the young lady in most e1uivocal position.
 Another unpleasant fault of tho thoughtIess visitor is to ignore the din- ner hour, regardless of the fact that certain preparations are made and that it is not always convenient to keep the meal waiting sometimes two hours after it is prepared, particularly when the gentleman of the house has his evening duties or pleasures to fulfill, and must have regular time for the social meal of the day,
 The young lady visitor should not be obtrusiye but she should join with zest in his pleasures or amusements of the familv and observant to such a degree