davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26
WIT AND WISDOM.

TIE thief that is found is lost.
 A CRATE singer-Tho tea.kettlo.
 A LONG strike-Twelve by tho clock.
 A CALICO wrapper "A drygoods clerk.
 AN Indian orator is n red ho speaker
 AFFAIR of "nippen"-Two old topon.
 QunISE's down to dollar an ounce Shake
 HE is wise man who lays something aside for holiday.
 A TEXAN stcer--giving a man twenty four hours to leave town.
 KHARrouM must be praeticing on roller skates.. We hear that it has fallen again.
 IT takes two to make a bar-gain-the man who sells the drink and the man who buys it
 Ir has been remarked that some give according to their means and some ac- cording to their meanness.
 TEN dollar gold pieces of 1915 arc ex- ceedingly rare and valuable. Ten dollar pieces of any date are valuable.
 THERE is man in Vermont who doesn't know what freedom means. He was married the day he came of age.
 A LADY, while looking at the collec- ton of shells in the museum recently, remarked that ''it must be just lovely to study shellology."
 ONE Boston man won eighteen hats on the election, and his wife will uso sixteen of them to stow away the oatnip and other herbs for winter.
 "JoHN, what is the best thing 10 feed a parrot on 2' asked an elderly lady of her bachelor brother, who hated parrots. 'Arsenio," gruffly answered John.
 Ir is said that kerosene will remove stains from furniture. It has also been known to remove the furniture, stains aud all, with the stove and servant girl thrown in.
 Foaa tells of young couple who lovo each other SO devotedly that they would not care if everybody else in the world were dead and buried. They are vory, very happy pair.
 SHE looked at the waning moon and remarked: "How pale it is." ''It ought to look pale" he replied, with the air of man thoroughly conversant with his subject, ''it has been full for several nights."
 Mn RICHARDS was down cellar sori- ing potatoes. A friend, calling to soc him, asked if it wasn't hard work to keep at that business all day. "oh, no,' said he; "but 1t Is great strain on tho judgment"
 AN old Vermont farmer who wont down Co visit Boston returned and told his wife there "was the long waistedcst girls he over seed in his life down thar. He caught sight of a few with Mother Hubbarls on.
 THERE's a grate menny kinds of folkca in the world, and there's n grsto menny kinds of apples, and it wouldn't be rite to condemn all the apples because the one you bit into was sour and puekor'd up your mouth.
 A PRooF Render out for walk was met by Typographical Error; but tho Proof Reader did not speak, nor did he even bow in recognition. "Ifa, ha, chuckled the Typographical Error, CT knew he wouldn't see me l'
 DfoaENEs washing some cabbages, and seeing Aristippus approach, said; .'If you knew how to live upon cabbagcs you would not pay court to kings" "And if you, replied Aristippus, "knew how to live with kings you would not wash cabbages."
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26

Do Nor LIKE IT.-Sir Thomas Nell. wrath, ex-prime Minister of Queens land, has just returned there from Eng land, and has made speech condemn ing the apathy of England in not trying to divert the the stream of immigration from America to her own colonies, and urging the federation scheme as a means of forcing the mother country seriously to consider the question. The tone adopted by the public men of all the Australian colonies is very significant just now.
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26

USED UP.-It is about time that the unmeaning phrase, 'tpainting the town red" ceased to be used. It sounded very funny for the first few thousand times, but it's repetition has now become 80 ceaseless and monotonous that 1t is making the average man tired.
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26

A PLAIN, genteel dress ie moro ad. mired, and obtains more credit, than lace and embroidery in the eyes Of the malicious and nenaihle.
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26

TIE American Scientific Association has l, ,439 members, fully one third com- ing from Boston and New York.
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26
AnMAYn TnuE.


 One true heart is mine today
 Mine tomorrow, mine alway;
 One heart always patient, kind
 To faults and fnlliess loving, blind,
 Forgiying, tender. Where find another So proudly, unselhshly fond As mother2
 NELLIE F. pRArr. A CmoAao man wanted divorce be- cause his wife persisted in singing hymns. The Court laughed at him, and he would have lost his case had not the lawyer summoned the wife 10 the witness stand and started her singing. At the fifth verse the Court threw up the sponge and the divorce was granted. A STUPID young man, supposed to be crack -brained, who was slighted by tho girls, very modestly asked young lady eff she would let him spend the evening with her." "No,' she angrily replied, "that's what I won't" "why," replied he, "you needu't be fuzzy; Ididn'tmean this evening, but some stormy one when I can't go anywhere else"
Connecticut western news., 1884-11-26
nnsKIN nN MoMIN.

An, wasleful woman she who may
 On her sweet self set her own price, Knowing he cannot choose but pay,
 How has she cheapened Paradisel How given for naught her priceless gift, How spoiled tho bread and spoiled the wine, Which, spent with duo, respective thrift, Had made brutoa men, and men divine.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
"a LITTLE NONSENSE"

A whaling company has been start
ed In san francisco An od-iashioncd
schoolmO,lcr would make good Presi.
dent Of the concern, PicdyHHe,
The London World tells of new
conlriynncc 20 make ladies taller, The
ladies have coulriyanccs enough for
making men short OIL City Bixsard,
"A man who has happened to have u
good deal Of experience says, Stand
anywhere hat -four feet 10 the left Of o
woman when sho hurls an old bottle nj
n hen "
There was q reward offered the 9th,
or day for the recovery Of "a large
leather lady's travelling bag" Whether
or not the large leather lady has got Il
back has not been stated, Buffalo Ep-
press,
Mrs. Spaggins was boasting Of her
new house, The windows she said were
stained That's too bad; but won't
turpenlnc or benzinc wash II oifp"
asked the good Mrs. oldboy. Boston
Post
"A French Marquis was riding out
one day, when he passed m old priest.
trotling along contcntedly on quiet
donkey, "lla, ha'' exclaimed the
Marquis, GLOW gooth the Ass, good
lnthcr9' "On horseback, my son-on
horsc.bOck'' replied the pricst--M y.
hdSpcndcm
"a penny for your thoughts, wife,
"Bul need two, " "Iwowha Two
pennies. What forp" For my
thoughts" 81 do not understand"
"You saw my little poem of Thoughts,
didn't you9" "Corlainlv" "Weil, the
editor says must send n two-Cont stamp
II ! want my Thoughts back, ~ Detroit
Post
"A splendid gilt dining room, with
almost nothing on the table 10 eat
was thcpccuinrity Of n New York mscr.
A way was invited 10 dinner and the
host asked him II he didn't think the
room elegant, "Yes,n was the reply,
III this were my house, you know, |
would have looking Ot the ceiling.
"less gliding, aud "(hcrc he glanced At
the dining lablc,) "and more carving"
~ Y NdH
Gave upon that pure, beautiful
evening star, aud swear 10 bc true while
its light shall shine Swear my love
Swear by Venus " exclaimed Boston
youth In impassionato accents, "llow
stupid you are, answered the Boston
girl, "rhot Is not Venus The right
ascension Of Venus this month is l5h.
Dm, her dcclnation Is II degrees 20
minutes south, aud her diameter IL
1912, ~ boston 7raRSrripk
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
LR MnNER,S ard ANN
Applying Manure 10 Grass Lanas.

The number OF farmers who believe
In applying manure 10 grass lands In
the autumn Is every year increasing,
The old idea that manure applied 10
the surface Of the land, except lust be-
fore II Is 10 be taken up by the grow
Ing plants, loses u considerable por-
ton of lts fertility IL at the present
time believed by but u very few, OBJ
Soryaiion aud experiment have taught
that the loss 10y evaporation of manure
that ls applied In the autumn is more
than made up by tho protection which It's
application affords 20 the roots of the
grass
Anolherady0ntage In the fall nppllca-
tlon Is the frequent freezing and thaw-
Ing of the manure, breaks up the
humps, aud makes II so fine that
II settles down among the roots of the
grass, 10 a position where II IL not only
oul Of the reach Of the knives of tho
mower hut In Just that portion when
sprlng opens, TO get the right degree OF
moisture and neat 10 hasten docomposl-
ton, thus rapidly producing plant food.
But when manure Is spread on the
surface in the spring, unless very wet,
the Jumps dry hard and are not only In
the way Of the mower, but do not de-
compose, and 50 do not furnish plant
food until another year
Many farmers now make II n practice
10 begin 20 manure their grass lands In
the autumn, and continue TO apply tho
manure as fast ns made until they have
applied all that they think they can
spare Tor the purpose, claiming that TO
do 30 secures a. them better crops Of
grass. and at the sNme time advances
their work when they are not as busy as
In the spring months,
One of the most wasteful methods Of
applying manure is 10 get II ont In the
autumn and leave II over winter In
small hcups, spreading II In the spring
after the grass begins 10 grow, Tho
number who do this ia comparatively
small, but every year we see here and
there Que who docs; doing II probably
under the impression that the loss Il
much less than II spread al once after
carried 10 the field In the autumn. BY
This practice all Of the outside of the
i'nps dry hard, 50 hard that when
spread In the spring the humps do not
soften, bat remain hard aud dry 70 ob-
sJrUet the mower and 20 bo rNkod up
with the hay
Whom the manure sprcndcr comes into
general use this practice will be- aban-
dOuOd, - NdsSdchNSC HOHghDidR.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
AIoai wou,lorful.

Very seldom do we read Of an actual
case Of recovery, whore hope had alto.
gether been lost, 10 equal that which on
Monday wds investigated by u Dispatch
reporter who had heard, In various quar-
tors, persons talking TO their friends Of
u cure, seemingly little short Of miracu-
lOus, that had been performed. Wm.
Lincoln Curtis N the name OF the young
man IN question lilo is now employed
~ II, X. Porter n Co.'s Locomotive
Works, Pittsburgh, His disease was
chronic rheumatism, The enormous
swelling and pain IN tho joints OF his
arm soon produced paralysis OF his left
arn He gradually grew worse, his an.
klcs and knees were soon even worse
than his arms, hia cheek bones began
10 enlarge, spreading his face out Of all
resemblance TO its former self Two
physicians pronounced him hopeless.
Perunu cured him, Page 20 DR., Hart
mans ellis Of Life"
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
PERSONAL AND niPERs0NAL.

Justice Pratt, OF New York, has q
permanent smile on his face, made by
bullet wound,-M y, SIN,
The late Commodore Berrlen en-
tered the navy rs mdshlpman, In
1929, and saw active service for thirty
seven years,
Miss Fanny Everett, aged eighty
two, has been postmistress OF West Fox
borough, Mass, for twenty-five years.
Boston Herdh,
Mrs Mary Helm, who died recently
NJ Owinsburg, Pa, aged elghty-three
years, was never inside OF u railroad car,
-Miiadeiphia Press,
Emily $, Rice was elected County
Clerk OF Harper County, Kan, by over
three hundred majority, She Is the first
woman ever elected TO the position In
Kansas - Chicago Inter Ocean,
When Mr. james T, Fields invented
the name Of Manchesler-by.the-Sea,
and wrote q note to DR., o, W. Holmes,
dated from the place, Dr. Holmes re-
piled In note dated "Beverley-by-the-
Depot
Chief Johnstono, Of the Canadian
Mohawks, lives IN q costly mansion on
u bank Of the Grand River, His estate
Is called "Chlcfswood,h " His wife Is an
EngllshwOman of refinement and his
daughters have been educated abroad,
The chief does not draw Government ra-
tions, Detroit Post.
Hannibal lIamlin Is not the only
distinguished parsonage who has made
u practice through life Of never wearing
mn oyercoat, The late Canon Bladon,
whose near approach TO centcnarianlsm
will be remembered, attributed his long
years and good health 20 the same &C.
centrlcily, BOSTON Post,
Mrs Elizabeth Cady Stanton and
Miss Susan Il, Anthony arrived In New
York recently from Europe, both In
good health and spirits, Notwithstanding
n rather lempcstuOus voyage During
their solourn abroad these ladies' met n
large number OF people who sympa-
lhllcd with the movement to secure
suffrage for womon,-M T. Tribune,
The late Th6s Whirldge, Of Balti-
more, whose bcqucst Of 100000 10 the
American Unitarian Association, togeth-
or with large bcqucsts TO relatives aud
friends, has excited much interest, was
native Of Tivcrton, X, l.. where he
was accustomed TO pass his summers.
He was clghly-two years old and had
made his large fortune In the Rio and
China trade, - baltimore Sm,
Prof Thomas j. Morgan, Of Pots
dam, n, T., has been chosen principal
Of the Rhode Island State Normal
School lie Is n native of Indiana, was
graduated In the State in 1861, and
served in the army during the war;
coming out u BrigadicrGcnerol, Since
then he has succcssively had charge of
the work Of the New York Baptist
Union for Ministerial Education, been
principal Of the Nebraska State Nor
nal School held u profcssorship In the
Chicago Theological Seminary and been
principal Of the Normal School ut Pots
lam,-N J. Times,
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
"Don't Cut Me upw

The other night two Atlanta policc-
men while passing medical college,
noticed n man shying arouud In
the dark Suspccting that something
was wrong, they gave chase and
ran him for some distance, No soon
er had the officers started after him
than hc began TO yell "Murdcr Oh,
LOrdy' Dem sludcntsN After run OF
more than n hali-milc he was caught
"Who are you'' demanded one Of tho
officers
"Ain't dun uunin boss Fore God [
amt ~ continued the excited negro.
"Whnt did YOU run forp'
"Don' I cut me mp, for dc Luwd sake,
mnscri'
"Who wants 20 cut youp What have
YOU dondp'
"Dem students dem sludon,sl Oh,
Lowdl' aud the poor fellow fell TO the
ground yelling and screaming
The officers pncilicd him, and finally
found ont that the supposed midnight
prowlor thought they were students
hunting for somebody to dissoct. -
atlanta Consultations
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
New MeIhOA Of Curing Hams.

A contributor 10 the Country Gcntir.
nun makes novel suggestion ror smok-
Ing hams, AS0suhstltutc for the smoke
house, lac says, smoke u barrel thor
oughly with maple or hickory chips
(rulsc the barrel nm inch or two from
the ground 10 furnish draughD, and
when smoked sufficiently, sweep out the
Inside and give II slight rinsiug with
cold water, When YOU have thus pre-.
pared II, pnck the hams aud shoulders
In u, flesh side up, and pour over them
the pickle In quantity sufficient to cover
them aud your work Is done The
pictlc extracting the desired smoky ia
yOr from the barrel, will carry Il
through the whole mass Of meat, and
much more equally or evenly, than by
the usual process of smoking, ~ the
llOyOr will bc as strong In the center as
Ot the surface Of the ham, In addition
10 this even lloyorng Of the meat thli
process will be found TO he much less
troublesome and luhorious, avoiding the
risk Of falling into the fire, of burning
smukt.housc, or into the hands of thiev.
ing ncIghhors beside escaping the filth.
ness whicl, {, inscpomblc from the com
mon way Of smoking and ts consequent
waste when preparing II lor the table,
Os the mcal IS IN every way ny clean
when taken from the barrel ~ when
plNccd IN It, by this process, all the
expense, labor aud trouble Of hagging
tho hams after making, TO keep them
from tho lliCs s ohyiHlcd, rs they may
be- kept submerged In the pickle. till
wnu,od, or tho last piece Ia desired for
the grluirolL pot or pan, BE sure 10
smoke the barrel very thoroughly II you
would have strong flavor OF smoke ia
your meat
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09

OuT Of the forty.one Ohio Democratic
papera received at this Office in the last
lew days, thirty ak favor the re.elec-
tIon Of Senator pendloton, four are for
Payne, and one for Ward, OF the great
Democratic dailies outside the state, n
large majority ARE for Pendleton, n few
for Thurman, aud not ono for Payne.
II the clalms Of Pendlelon and Payne
were TO be submitted TO Il popular vote
OF the Democracy Of ohio, We have no
doubt Pendleton would receive not less
than 100000 majority, News journal.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1884-01-09
rIlesl .i,lleni rllenl

A sure for Blind Bleeding, Itch
ing and liberated Piles has been dis
covered by DR.. Williams, IAN Indian
remedy) called DR. WILLIAMS INDIAN
OINTMENT, A single box hns cured the
worst chronic cnses Of twenty-five
years standing. No one need suffer
Ave minutes after applying this wonder
tul soothing medicine. Lotions and in
airumenta do more harm than good,
williams Ointment absorbs the tumors,
0llayalth intense itching, particularly
NJ night after getting warm IN bed),
ncts lls II poultlce gives instant and
painless relief, and IL prepared only for
pllea, itching Of tho private parts, and
for nothing else. For sale by all drug
gists, and mailed on receipt Of price, 81.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1884-11-06
VIRGINIA.

RICHMOND, November 5th.-Fuller returns are
| encouraging to the Democrats. and they claim
| the Cleveland ticket is elected by not less than
| $500 majority. The Republicans still stand to
| their claim of from 5000 to 5000 majority for
Blaine.
R1cIpGoND, November 5th-The Democratic
majority in this State is probably 1900
PETERSBURG, November 5th - Returns re
ceiyed from several precincts in the Fourth
Congressional District up to this morning show
Blaine and Logan, 4.i6l; Cleveland and Hen
dricks, 2377.
LYNCHBURG, November jth.-Incomplete re
| turns from the Nineteenth District show large
Democratic gains, and indicate the election of
| Trigg (Dem) for Congress
PETERSBURG. November 5th.-Rcturns are
meagcr. The vote is evidently very close Both
Republicans and Democrats claim it. General
Stith Boiling, member of the Republican State
Central Committee, says to-day that the Repub-
licans will carry the State by from 5000 to 200
| majority, and the district by about 1900 ma
| jority.
RICHMOND, November 5th.-Nearly all the re-
| turns are received, and show net Democratic
gain and few losses. The Democratic majority
may reach 5000. They claim eight of the ten
| Congressman from this State
New YORK, November5th.-The latest adyices
| from Virginia, received at the Republican head
| quarters here, make the majority for Blaine
from 1000 to 1860
PETERsBUEG, November 5th.-The Democrats
| are claiming the State by 1000 majority SEN
| ator Malone claims it for the Republicans by
5000,
| RICHMOND, November 5th.-Oficial and semi
official returns from 20 counties and all the
cites of Virginia give Cleveland II. .7Si majority
These returns embrace many large Republican
counties, and indicate that the State will give
Cleveland from 1900 to 10000 majority. 1t is
now quite certain that the Democrats have
elected eight out of the ten Congressman.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1884-11-06
ILLINOIS.

CHICAGO, November 5th. - Three thousand
three hundred and lightweight precincts, out
side Of Cook county show net Democratic
gain OF 77l4.
CHICAGO, November 5th.-Returns from Hi
nois come in very slowly about the State nj
large. Republican managers claim that the
state IS safely Republican for the national
ticket i; IS expected that the approximate Is
innate VIII be reached early this afternoon
one hundred and twcntyscven precincts in the
city of Chicago out of III give Blaine a6Gi2,
Cleveland q so.
CHICAGO, Noynbcr 5th.-Forty-s counties
ontsjde of Cook county. with - precincts to
hear from, give Blaine y. -.
CHICAGO, November 5th.-RcturnS from Hi
nois came in slowly, ana were of nature to
cause doub; as to the possible msiorities; but
the state was generally conceded 10 the Rcpub
lcanS, both on the state and Presidential tick
cts The Chairman of the Republican State
Committee made claim during the afternoon
of 2o.oo) majority on Governor, and Al majority
in both branches of the Legislature.
CHICAGO. November 5th.-Cooll county. with
eighteen precincts outside the city missing
gives Cleveland 80, SIS Blaine &c, - Blaime's
majority, Csgi. The remaining.distrcts give an
estimated majority of 550)--a Republican loss
of3.Oli. compared with 1850 For Governor, with
thir.y-threc counties and precincts missing,
Cook county gives Harrison DEM a majority
OF SIS
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1884-11-06
MICHIGAN.

DETROIT, November 5th.-2:i5 A. Mt is i'm
possible to tell definitely at this hour what the
result is in this State and the last bulletin sent
indicates that the Republican State and national
tickets are ahead; but at the rate of Democratic
gains there seems 10 be chance for the State
to go Democratic. However the upper penin-
sula is not all heard FROM and it is strongly Re
publican.
Two hundred and forty nine precincts give
Blaine As sI5 and Cleveland 81, 400.
DETROIT, November 5th-1 P M-Verv little
additional returns have been received from
Michigan this morning. It is believed the Re
publicans elect the Presidential Electors For
Governor. Begole (FIsion) and Algcr (Rep.) will
be very close, with both parties claiming Il vie
tory for Congress. The Fusionists elect repre-
scntatives in the First, Fourth Sixth and Seventh
all Democrats. The Republicans elect in the
Second, Third and Ninth. The Fifth is still in
doubt, with strong indications the election of
a Democrat. The Eighth, Horr's district, is
still undecided, but has probably gone Fusion.
Nothing additional is reported on the Legisla-
ture.
EAST SAGINAW, November 5th.-This district
uhe Eighth has gone Democratic, although the
figures are not known. R. G. Horr (Rep.) is de-
feated by Tarsney (FusiOn). The Republicans
conccde Tarsney's majority as 800, and the Dem
Gratis claim 400.
DETROIT, November 5th-The returns from
Michigan in.regard to the Fusion vote may be
somewhat confusing. The Republican vote is
in full on the leading candidates To get the
full Fusion vote on President it is necessary to
add the vote given separately in the bulletins
for Cleveland and Butler. If the vote of the
State is decided for the Fusion ticket, as seems
probable at this writing Cleveland will receive
six electoral votes, Butler six and one goes for
Blaine. In voting, the Greenbackers and Dem
ocratS voted for the same men for twelve cleo
torul places, and for different men for the thr-
teenth place, which allows a chance for one
Blaine elector. 1t was desired to find the rela-
tive strength of the Greenbackers and Demo
Gratis and hence the vote was sent separately.
The reports so tar give very little information
about the upper peninsula, which is a Republi-
can stronghold; but the indications are for
! great Democratic gains there.
| DETROIT, November 5th.-Fiye hundred and
thirty precincts give Blaine SS,671, Cleveland
7G,lOl, Butler 15l29, st. John 6,179. Fusion
| plurality, 2.5j9.
! DETROIT, November 5th.-This afternoon the
vote received indicates the election of the Fu-
sion State and National ticket, but later figures
! altered this somewhat, and the Democrats now
! claim the state. The Republicans also claim
/ the State