Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1884-04-25
TAXPAYER WAKES 'EM UP AGAIN,
Bow11Ne GREEN, April Is, 1884.

earth will rise again" How often do we
see this verified. In my article TO the
JOURNAL of March 81, 1884, l touched
upon certain facts concerning the straw
editors of the Sentinei-I mean Allen, the
son of Joab of modern times, and not OF
ancient origin or of eminent extraction,
who assumes TO be the editor OF that no.
torious sheet, which he is pleased to call
the ring organ.
When the JOURNAL containing my ar
ticle entered the shoddy sanctuary OF
Allen it produced such an upheaval that
all things turned blue in and about the
Office, and the smell of birthstone was
plainly visible. Allen, it is said, cursed
and frothed at the mouth, while Joab,
tile father, broke down in grief, as he
plainly saw the hand writing on the wall
The boss soon put in his appearance and
demanded the cause of such an uproar.
Joab, without opening his apostolic lips
handed tine JOURNAL to the boss which
very su0n explained all. But the query
to the trio now is, who is "TaXpayerW
Was it written at the hub or at the burg
But on close inspe cton it was finally
decided 10 be The work of either Benny
Eberly, Judge Ewing, or Brewer. Now if
there was no truth in the article in aues-
tion, why did the Ruaulph's try on the
| shoe that pncled at first sight. l want
| no better evidence OF the truth of my as
! sertions than TO see how they are cut TO
| the quick.
understand that Able, not the SON of
| Cane, but the son OF Comstock, is about to
start for Washington on an "errand of
mercy" as he calls it, looking after the
pensions of those who have claims pending
| in the pension department. Well. if Able
is IA successful in other cases as he was in
getting Mrs. Wiley restored to the pension
rolls, after she had been married twelve or
| fourteen years, and by this act had for
feited her pension, they will be very sure
of getting it. Mrs. Wiley was divorced
some nine or ten years ago from her hus-
| band, Joe Freeborn, on the ground of gross
neglect and being habtual drunkarJ. SO
am informed How woman who was
drawing pension should get married, aud
when tired of the man and would give
more for her pension than the man and
could again be placed on the pension rslls
| at her old rate, in few years after being
divorced, WIS wnat puzzled me and
think the most of the people in the Green
But a few days ago the mystery WAS solved
when was let into the secret. Able Is
made an assistant special examiner and
pension agent, TO assist w. &. Shelley
who is II special pension examiner.
So you see, Mr. Editor, that there is
more than one way 10 kill u cat, and skin
| it. have mv doubt but what Able is sal.
isfied that there is more than one way to
make living without hard labV.. He
says his body is too much for his Leg; his
| legs have given ont and want pension
as his legs were broken down in the army.
| Now il Able's legs were broken down aud
his bowels refuse to perform their duty,
am Of the opinion that it must have been
done while in the army and not since llis
discharge as his legs have been most Of the
lime since then al an angle of iorty-6ve
degrees, and other parts Of his pereon has
been made to support his 250 pound body
| Able can make chronic diarrhuea pension 9
work on others, but not on himself, AS
that body of his gives his gives his disease
away badly. His legs might have given
out when n certain tellvw Of the 2lst o. ".
/. reached for and got seven pair oi boots
from sutler one night, and tried il again
the next night and got mold Of two more
pair; but Just then Mr.. Sntler reached Tor
the thief and got hold OF him and held
him fast until guard arrived and walked
the fellow off to the lOck-up. phis took
place at Stone River. Now il Colonel
Nibling was still alive, no doubt but what
he could tell who the fellow was and ali
about The court martial.
Now don't wish to be personal and tell
who took the boots, as that wouG not
sound nice in the streets and Just be-
fore convention day, especially 10 those
who expect to allow their names to come
before the convention us u fit subject for
the disposal OF justice. This lnmg OF
being AN attorney and jadge for the gov
ernment, and pension agent for The sol.
diels, all al the same time. is getting the
thing down TO fine point. Whatever
Able may lack In ability ~ n pension at
torney he may be able to make up by the
number OF ropes he has 10 pull at. He is
what might be properly called an auto
matical machine, double geaieJ one NJ
that. If the Pension Department had a
few more like Able 1t could dispense with
one-half OF the clarical forces aud then ex.
pedite business faster than IL does now.
But must cease writing and wait fol
events and in due time report the results
TAXPAYER,