Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1884-11-28
The Hot Spell in Pike County.

The Hot Spell in Pike County.
"Aha, boys!' said he, rubbing his
hands. "It's like regeneratin' speerit,
b'gosh, to feel some giniwine ole ortumn
weather peelin' of itself fur business
wunst more, hain't it,"
The boys knew the old settler. No
one spoke word. No one seemed to
hear him. He looked around. Evil
lentIy no one intended to dissent from
his estimate of the weather. The pleased
expression left his face. He looked
,, thoughtful, Suddenly his face bright.
med again. BE seemed to catch d ray
If hope.
"The squire hain't bon an gone
Already, has he, boys?" said he; "cause
if he has-ao he hain't, b'gosh! Here
he comes now, loppin' along, prayin' to
hisself, I'll bate, cause the 'ternal hot
summer ez we've had has got up an
scooted."
Sure enough, the squire came; his
coat off, his shirt sleeves rolled up, bis
hat in one hand, while he mopped his
| fuce with his bapdanna. The old set
tier looked more than pleased. The
Squire wilted down in q chair like
lettuce leaf under hot vinegar.
"W.h-e-e~w !" said he, wall, major,
I've sea SOME tol'able weather in my
time, think, ta]xin' it hot an cold ez it
runs from Janiwary to July, an from
July to Janiwary, but if this don't
plumb the bulls eve little slicker than
any hot weather that ever tackled me
afore, then I'm dod-durned from way
back!"
+ "Hotw exclaimed the old settler, and
you'd have sworn he was really aston
ished. "Hot! I hope you don't call this,
hot weather, squirrel! Here's me an
Mriar kiverin' up our flower beds ev'rv
night to keep 'em from bein fetched
with frost, an here's YOU q hollerin'
bout it's bein' hot Squire, burned if
/ don't think you'm gettin' a leetle
cracked 7 do, b'gosh"
II may be gettin' a leetle Cracked
major" replied the squire, IAN you
may be kiverin' up yer flower beds
fur fear o frost, Or .ye may be lynn,
jist as ye please, with bets in favor
O. the lyin', but This the fust hot
weather I ever see. If sunpin' hain't
twisted the equator way from Cuby
and cropped it down onter Pike
county, then We kin bile me!
} "Squire," said the old settler ,remen-
| Swell. L, -, .1cSp y
SO consumed contrary? I don't mean
, no fence, but, b'gosh, ye make yerself
: pooty clus onter disagree'ble, some
tunes Now, ifTd come an set down
. here an said it was hot, you'd a right
, up an pooh-poohed, an said sumpin
, bout yer havin' had durn notion o put
+ tin on yer overcoat fore We left, hum, an
I was sorry ye hadn't, or some other piece
. ,contrairiness. Then ye allus seem tc
, wanter to pick quart. Here I sot
an want sayin' a consarned word bout
0, the weather, an you bounces an' begins
9 lat me bout it's bein' hot! Then, cause
. L don't fall in with yer contairiness, bui
9 sticks up for it's bein' bracin' an insini'
,watin' ortumn weather, whichat is, then
I We git mad an say I'm lynn. Wall,
:, kin iist tell we, b'gosh. squire, that ]
. hain't agointer risk my flower beds jisi
3 cause you say it's hot, not by long
; ; shot, hain't an We kin like it or lump
IL. whichever We durn please?'
: stFlower beds!" exclaimed the Squire.
, ."Who cares fur yer flower beds ? don'1
care a hair out'n a mules tail for 'em,
Ye kin kiver 'em, an 'onkiver 'em
an kiver 'em agin An, .ye kin
, go right down an krver EN-,
, if We want to. Nobody's holdin' oh ye,
But We can't set thar an face me down
,, that it hain't hot! Ye never see itso hot
! an We know It'll Look at theth MON ter
; I4cok at the til mom'ter, with the bali
on it heated so We can't bear yer finger
: on it, an then say it hain't hot! YOU
make me sick major!"
' IT don't care for no th'mom'ter r
. exclaimed the old settler "D''yes'pose
Tina gointer let a thing like that, e2
e can't do nothin' but hang onter 8 post,
hang out weather fur me? Wall, b'gosh
t no! We had little weather, I guess,
! fore th NOM ters come out, an we'd hex
!. some more weather If ev'ry one on ZEN
!, in creation should bust an th' couldn1
no more git made. The idee, anyhow
. o'folks b'ievin' that all the weather e.
: comes along has TO pass. through then
| aurn things fore we kin know
how hot it is! I know wher
weather's hot, L think. I kin mem:
Der one summer when WAS a boy
). when it was so hot that we had to keeE
, the rippinest kind q big fires agein' il
the house, all the time to cool off the
! air, it be;n' so durn much hotter'n The
!. are wasl Why. twas a common thing
I that summer fur folks ez was travelin
!, / to stop at Ioases long the roads an ass
I ifthey could please GENE in an set By
Che fire an get cool It makes nae
colder'n I aet'iy feel tonight, to thinl
9 q some o. the hot waatherfI kin mem
Der. B-r- r-r Till be frost tonight.
sartin' &c. y ... MN
The county clerk got up and walked
!. inside. Il e he boys and the squire trailed
q, after HIM The old settler edged u
rubbing his hands. Everybody hat the
old settler ordered it with ice. He wa
game to the last.
Bartender, : said be. make me q 10 10
;sootch.