The St. Charles herald. [volume] (Hahnville, La.) 1873-1993, 1884-03-08
COL. RIED'S LADY REPORTER.

COL. REDS LADY REPORTER.
A lady reporter may be success in
the crowded and methodical East where
the baseball editor loathes the market
reports, and the police-court man would
rather be fired than attempt report of
the minister's alliance; but in the linn
tied resources of Western journalism,
where reporter is liable to gloat over
dog fight one moment, and in the
next penetrate the haliowed circle of
home, with all its beautiful and holy
traditions, and write up a scandal, she
is vast and monumental failure. LIDO
not mean this as slur upon lady jour
nalists at large, but as a solemn warI-
ing to them that they had better not be
at large in the wild, untu ored West;
and, if they have any aspirations, to by
all means confine them to contributions
to those thrilling ser. ais entitled 'sHouse-
hold Hints" and "Useful Recipes"
which are to be found in all well-regu-
lated journals. The glittering and
vvacious personalities popular beyond
the Missouri, the tact required to ex-
plain to a 201-pound man how his name
crept into the police reports, to say
nothing of the inaccessible location of
the free lunches, would all tend to make
lady reporter discouraged and wish
she was dead; while her close sleeves
and pocketless jersey would give the
other sex such an enormous advantage
over her in the poker games at the
Press Club that she would be reduced
to constant perjury. These are things
which are prone to be overlooked in the
glad, girlish enthusiasm of the moment,
bnt they are cold, deathless facts, all the
same.
always told Colonel Ried that it was
a most unnatural thing to suppose that
Providence ever intended woman for
a reporter, so / was surprised and
shocked when 1 learned that he had en-
plo ed one. Ried was running the Do
Iores NeWS, had good circulation in a
lively town, the county printing, and
was .amassing so much real estate that
few men stood higher that he on the de
linquent tax-list wnen he took this i'll
advised and fatal step. He was very
large, pompous gentleman, and the sus-
picion prevailed at Dolores that he Aad
been great society mana regular
butterfly-back East and, indeed, when
the question whether it was good man
ners to carry a bowie-knife in ones
bootleg at soiree was agitating the
best people of the town, it was finally
referred to him, as the leading AUTHORITY
on etiquette in the country. The fact
was, though, the Colonel was really as
timid as a hare in the presence of 6
woman, and couldn't tell a quadrillt
from quadroon at twenty yards; and
possibly, this diffidence and inability Il
arlue the most trivial point with one Of
the sex led to his employing her. She
was very Young, very pretty; and had {
sngularly confiding way of talking tina
put ordinary matters in the light of con
fidential disclosures, and carried Ger
tain subtle, treacherous flattery with i
that sent an idiotie grin into the coun
tenance of every man she talked to. 1
seems str nge to me, now, that per
son of the foresight of the Colonel coult
not have had some foreboding OF hi
doom in all these things.
veil, the first trouble was about tn
exchanges. Now, every body know
that it is well-established fact that ;
newspaper with piece cut out will
make woman perfectly desperate un
til she finds out what it was. The con
sequence was that when Miss Nolan
that was her name-ran across about
hundred of them, all more or less mutt
lated BY Ried in getting up his spic
and original editorial notes, she settle
hersel right down and wasn't availabl
for assignment for q week. After tina
the Colonel read his exchanges in tn
countlng-room and hid them in scared
hal hearted way under the stove wher
ever she came in.
A short time after that she remarked
one day, in the Office, that Judge Gu
ran, down at the police court, was show
inmpartiality to the Eclipse represent;
tive. and Ried told her to give him
rood scoring. She condensed he
wrath in one trenchant line:
ssJudge Curran is hate ul thing"
The Colonel, VINO pr1ded himself VI
on his vigorous pei sonalities, turne
pale and fled to the mountains for
week when he read the item; but Il
Eclipse ever after alluded to him
cher" and old Miss Red" to his gre
Sc ret anguish.
The next thing she broke out in WI
myster Gus little squibs, which she sea
fe ed through the local, and were d
signed for the edifcation Of her bose
friends. They wer5 such occult on
bursts, for instance, as these; "Kitty
9 emed to enjoy that ride very mut
with G. E. CT ''Ask George r. abo
that ring &C., your friend R. was
town yesterday. These items creat'
4 grave mistrust among the hone
miners of Dolores, and the rumor stal
al by the Eclipse that they were 4
nass-words for a horse-thief society,
which Ried was secreily member, al
thus communicated with the remand
oil the gang. was accepted as the me
natural and probable explanation.
course, the Colonel writhed under tn
but his explanations were received wi
general mlstrust. The circulation