Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1884-05-07
VIZ AND HUM0R,

Mary's father when he rc1useu 10 puf
her new bonnet
France is great country for law
yers and somebody Is bright enough to
remark that it is Il land OF Gaul.
Peaches arc like men. The little ones
are crowded out OF sight by the big TEL
lows.
Parusol Irritation is one of the newest
feats at the seaside. When Il girl jabs
A fellow in the eye with her parasol.
it means "you won't see much OF me-
In the far West man adyertiscs for
n woman to wash, iron and milk one or
two COWS. What does he want his COWS
washed and ironed forP
The impecunious condition of n too
celebrated family of royal lineage calls
forth from Punch the appellation OF the
"Duke and Duchess Of TICK"
There are dismal looking men who
can throw such gloom over fu-
neral that the corpse will be quito for
gotten
A Pennsylvania clergyman is pitch
err in baseball nine. His gestures
sometimes make the congregation duck
their heads. Burlington Free Press.
A fire in this city on Saturday and
the failure of pigeon race in the East,
both resulted from the same cause-a
detective llue.--PittSburg Despatch.
Is it dude? Yes, it is dude. Was
it always that wayp Yes, natural born,
What does it do for living? 1t breathes
dear; don't disturb it.
Punch defines the difference between
pitchfork and tuning fork: One is
used to make hay with, and the other
to make A with.
A New York man was fined 5000 for
giving tobacco to n giraffe in Central
Park. But they wouldn't fine him
centf he only gave whisky to boy.
"Now that have got my hay in"
said the relieved farmer, al think the
world would be greatly better for
good shower.-Boston GLOBE.
The telephone is said to be popular
in Colorado, for with it man may con-
verse with another and occasionally
reach around to his hip pocket for his
tobacco without being shot.
In several female colleges in Iowa
the girls are taught how to cook. 1t Will
come quite handy for them after mar
riage ii they get anything to cook
Yonker's Gazette.
~ never loved but one person.
sighed Biggs. "And, as a man can
not marry himself, remarked Fogg,
"of course it came to nothing. Poor
fellow!'
"Did the prisoner knock Mr.. Smith
down in retaliation?' asked the lawyer
of witness. mo, sir: he knocked him
down in the boardyard:" oil City Der
rick.
When man is in hurry to re ach q
certain point, which is the most annoy
inc. to arrive at the depot Il little too
late. or to learn that the train is eight
hours behind time? Rochester ErpreSS.
Tho tailor's apprentice, when COM
mencing his trade finds there is truth
in the text that "What man sews
that he shall also rip." - SomerriHe
journal.
At Niagara Falls q young bride was
very much embarrassed when hack
man pointed 10 her husband and said:
"Do you wish a carriage for your father
missP'
1t is about an even thing between a
man and IN orange peel. Sometimes
the man throws the orange peel into
the gutter. and sometimes the orange
peel throws the man.--London Musical
World.
A report Of q balloon accident in
France says: "By singular good for
tune it landed in marsh and Made
moisalle II last stood on terra irma. "
How pnyboatv can stand on terra hrma
in A marsh is conundrum.
"a Reverend Idol' is the title OF u
, new novel. We suppose the hero, a
young Clergyman, WAS so ido!!zcd by
his con yreratlon that toy raised his
= salary from 1850 to $50 y li"ui wait
l ing for him to ask for it. iicio is
stranger than truth ihR0deiphta
NecS.
l Cowardly:-A lion-tamer quarrelcd
' with his wife, powerful vigaro, and
was chased by her all around his tent.
On being sorely pressed he took refuge
5 in the cage among the lions. "Oh,
you contemplate coward" sho shout
, ed. Come out if you dare. "--Fron'
the French.
e A Fact:--Two gentlemen were ques-
tioning why professional men should sc
frequently be bald. The little daughter
5 of one had been an attentive, though
y unobserved listener, but made her pres
, ence and opinion known by suddenly
i exclaiming: "Oh, papa, know; it:
= so that their wits can come out"
: A young gentleman writing from
!, Long Branch asks whether it is gooC
form to hold a bird with ones finger:
X while eating it. If the bird is the regu
It lation watering-place spring chicken, i
is good form but poor policy. YOU
% should brace yourself against some
d thing and use both hands.
l. "Pray, my good man," said Judg'
;, to an Irishman who was witness on ,
" trial, "What did pass between yo,
y and the prisoner?' "Oh, then, plas'
- your Lordship," said Pat, "sure see
Phelim atop of the wall. Paddy!
- says he, 'Whatp' says l. 'Here!' say
e he. 'Where?' says l. WHIST says he
n 'Hush!' says l. And that's all, plas
- your Lordship. "-Chambers Journal
'e Music at home the egotism of genius
le Eminent violinist dell me.--wh
Is dat liddle paid old chendelman vi
70 vite viskers und re binc-nez, lookin,
lie at re bigchus?" Hostess:-'.It's m
!. Uncle Robertson. I'm grieved to sa
' he's quito deaf!'' Eminent Violinist:-
10 Zach, am 20 zorry for him! He vii
Is not pc APPLE TO hear me blay 70 tittle.
e Now, john" said the father of tn
city family to the father of the countr
IS family. ave have been spending a
.e summer with you, and as some sort Q
M recompense we are going to have som
y amateur theatricals and giveyou fare
l. well benefit" mo, thankee Charles,
II was the reply, "don't wait to do thai
The farewell will DO benefit enough 70
IL me-"
in A patent medicine manufacturer die
& in New York last week. Before he die
his friends asked him how he would Xix
IS to be buried. He had just strengt
IN enough left to say. 'Insert me to
w column next to reading matter. fifty
:, two times electro by mail, and the