Turner County herald. (Hurley, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1884-05-22
The New Reporter.
(From the New orleans Figaro.


A new reporter is a queer being, and
for brief period he revels in bliss. The
moment he secures position on daily
paper he thinks that the eyes of the
world rest on him alone, ana all that he
has to do is to reach up with one hand
and yank himself upon the pedestal of
fame. In the course of few months.
however, he realizes that he needs both
hands, three or four ladders, and some
one to give him good boost in order to
get there. The first thing that q new
reporter does when he enters news.
paper Office is to give vent to his opin-
ions, and point out to the old reporters
how easy the paper can be improved.
His surroundings are novel, and in con-
sequence he works like Trojan. If q
corner grocery burns down he pictures
a scene in two columns which harrows
the souls of men and makes the CITY
editor want to kill him in cold blood.
He will speak Of the lurid sky, and the
roaring flame licking its angry tongue,
and all that kind of stuff, and when he
sees next morning how the city editor
cut the whole article down to ten or
fifteen lines, he feels sure that the en-
tire staff are jealous of his thrilling STYLE
of writing, and wish to crush him.
The city editor sends him to report a
meeting, but the people there will not
admit him, and the bare idea that they
refused to allow him to be present at the
meeting is an insult which burrows its
way down to the roots of his futtering
soul, and he returns to the office towering
with rage. He flashes bis eyes and
pounds the air with both fists like an
untamed cavalier, and roars for revenge.
He must have it. The press must not
be throttled. 1t can not lie as long as
he has strength to WELD o pen, SO he sits
down with the hair on his head bulesd
out like the tail of an angry cat. and
commences his fierce attack. He writes
up the Barrel. makers Union as mere
wart upon the body polite. He scalds
everything connected with barrels and
their makers. He uproots the socia,
system, pitches into the law, tears up
the constitution, flaps his coat tails in
the face of the president, wipes his
boots on the capitol and points with
pride and satisfaction to BENJAMIN
Franklin and the flag. No, the press.
the great guardian of the liberties of the
people can and will not be suppressed
When pale with indignation, and reek-
ing with perspiraGop, he presents his
article to the city editor, that worthy
functionary sees fifteen libel suits in ii.
and he merely swears around the Office
until the lights go out, and they have to
put more water in the gas-meter.
An old reporter, however, never
dreams OF acting in such way. If he
is detailed to report the meeting of the
Barrel-makers' Union, and they refuse
to let him in, he thanks the barrel.
makers from the bottom of his heart.
The refusal lets him out of that much
work. 80 he loafs the evening away at
the theater, and looks at the pretty girls
IN the dress circle, and wonders if there
will ever be one for him. The dear
sweet, delightful things.
We recollect when Bilkins first went
to work on the Post that he had crav.
ing to plunge right into the middle of
literature and make fortune in two
weeks. One day he carried poem to
the city editor, who was an old ionrnal.
ist with bald head, three children a
skinny wife, and a disposition so sour
that II would shrivel crab. apple. The
city editor read the poem about little
child gathering flowers by a babbling
brook, and then turned to Bilkins and
said, 81 see that you must have mental
recreation. You have not been con
nected more than week with the paner
but the strain on you has been SO great
that it has dazed your mind. You need
rest: Go up in the country and shoot
Jay birds for week, and you will feel
better" Bilkins resigned his position
on the paper the next day, and is now
IN the lard business.