The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1884-05-24


hen-coop. 1t may take me to the city
to get some needed article. 1t may
carry me to Europe. | may be obliged
to consult with lawyers and iurists, all
through some indirect operation or
development growing out of this blue
bird box business. 1t has already cost
me two and a half hours labor, and l
expected to accomplish it in thirty min
utes." But | am now prepared for war.
| will devote the whole day to this I'M
neutrality-suspicious. two whole days.
repaired the ladder carefully, nail
ing braces both within and without the
broken upright l placed it in position
and mounted it, carrying q bird box
with me. Arrived at the ladders top
found | could not climb. the tree to the
spot where | desired to nail the box
with the box in my hands. So l went
down the ladder again and placed the
box on the ground. Then ! went up
the ladder so far as it reached, and
henceforth took to climbing. More OBJ
stacles presented themselves. Branches
got directly in the way. Twigs
scratched my face and tried to put out
my eyes. Bits of rotten branches and
dry bark dislodged and fell into my
eyes. There was more cutting away
to be done. | descended the ladder for
my hatchet, got it, and trimmed a road
up the tree. All as | supposed being
ready, l descended again for the box
and remounted. 1t was necessary to
take with me a hammer, gimlet and
some nails. | tied the hammer about
my neck with cord and put the nails
and gimlet in my vest pocket. Arrived
at the place where would nail the box,
! found it necessary to use the Ratchet.
Common sense or n few seconds
thought might have taught me that as
the Ratchet would probably be needed
again it should have been stuck by the
blade in the tree. No. | had pitched
it from the tree on the ground. SO |
went down the ladder again for the
Ratchet.
These CONTINUAL ascents and descents
began now to alarm me. They seemed
endless, and at the present rate | could
vaguely see more and more in the dim
distance of futurity before the boxes
were fastened.
finished with the Ratchet and was
turning the current of my thoughts on
the hammer when, that instrument
being tied, so to speak, by the neck,
suddenly as [ leaped over branch
turned a somersault, slipped through
the knot and fell straight to the ground.
1t fell wonderfully straight through the
branches, and on reaching the ground
lay there with a dull, sullen ''come
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES me-up" ex-
preston.
| did not come down Immediately. l
leaned over the branch and swore at
that hammer. But it did not rise.
Then it occurred to me how amusing all
this might be to any third party who
had nothing to do but look on and see
the performance. | said: "Why should
| not be the third party?n But | re-
minded myself that the third party had
amused, whereas | had all these per-
petual ascensions and descensions to
make besides being amused. The con-
tract was too large. | could not be
thoroughly amused and do all the work
besides. SO L descended again with
what patience l could summon. 1
picked the hammer up. | wanted to
wiring its neck. But what comes from
wringing hammers neck? Naught
save the necessity of buying a new
hammer
The hammer was picked up as it de-
sired to be. Again | climbed the lad
der In the midst of an apparently
speedy dispatch of the labors new
trouble presented itself. The tree had
changed its tactics and called new
ally to its aid.
This ally was hen-one of my hens.
My back door and only door had been
left open. This hen had entered, was
on my table consuming the remains of
my breakfast and threatening destruc-
ton with her awkward legs and claws
to my crockery. 1t is this particular
hen that annoys me in this way more
than all the rest. While they are off
foraging in the field she hangs around
that back door bent on thieving and
plumber.
l cried out ''Shoo." from above sew
eral times to no purpose. She wouldn't
''shoo!' She paid me no respectful at
tention whatever. She knew well
enough she had plenty of time to clear
out of the house before | could get
down from the tree. | made her sew
eral threatening remarks. She cooked
up one eye, winked atmein contempt
out manner, and calmly went on peck
ing. | threw several twigs in the house
to no purpose. | descended the ladder
and wrathfully drove her out She
went out as hens general do from any
pent up place, by the longest possible
way, with great risk to window panes
and fragile articles from her iluttering
wings, and with a great cackle and out
cry, as if She deemed it an outrageous
proceeding on my part thus to disturb
her while peacefully engaged in con-
yerting the breakfast scraps into fresh
eggs for my own use, which cackle and
cutlery was re-echoed by the head
roosters of her community in the field,
as If they too concurred and heartily
seconded her opinion of me.
So rebuked | climbed once more the
ladder and put myself in position for
mailing on the boNeS-a work of some
difficulty, since | was obliged to make
my body conform to the shape and re-
quirements of the tree and the various
divergences and contour of its trunk
and branches. Enecting one position,
| found that in it l could not strike
blow with the hammer through the
intprfprpnpn of q hostile littln limb T.,