The Abilene reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1883-1888, 1884-05-22

with the box in my hands. So | went
down the ladder again and placed the
box on the ground. Then / went IL
1.-THE ladder so far as it reach ID. and
| henceforth took to climbing. More %.
stacleS presented themselves. Branchc.
got directly in the way. Twig-
scratched nv fa &c and tried 10 pat q II
my eyes. Bits of rotten branches and
dry bark dislodged and fell into my
eyes. There was more cutting away
to be done. | descended the ladder foI
my Ratchet, got it, and trimmed road
up the tree. Ali as / supposed being
ready, l descended again for the box
and remounted. 1t was necessary to
take with me hammer. a gimlet and
some nails. tied the hammer about
my neck with cord and put the nails
and gimlet in my vest pocket. Arrived
at the place where Iwould nail the box,
| found it necessary to use the hatchet.
Common sense or a few seconds
thought might have taught me that as
the Ratchet would probably be needed
again it should have been stuck by the
blade in the tree. No. l had pitched
it from the tree on the ground. So
went down the ladder again for the
Ratchet.
These continual ascents and descents
began now to alarm me. They seemed
endless, and at the present rate 1 could
vaguely see more and more in the dim
distance of futurity before the boxes
were fastened.
| finished with the Ratchet and was
turning the current of my thoughts on
the hammer when, that instrument
being tied, so to speak, by the neck,
suddenly as | leaped over a branch
turned sOmersault, slipped through
the knot and fell straight to the ground.
1t fell wonderfully straight through the
branches, and on reaching the ground
lay there with a dull, sullen 'come
observation-disclosures pick-me-up' ex-
preston.
| did not come down Immediately.
leaned over the branch and swore at
that hammer. But it did not rise.
Then it occurred to me how amusing all
this might be to any third party who
had nothing to do but look on and see
the performance. / said: 'Why should
l not be the third party?" But / re-
minded myself that the third party had
nothing to do but sit down and be
amused, whereas | had all these per-
petual ascensions and descensions to
make besides being amused. The con-
tract was too large. | could not be
thoroughly amused and do all the work
besides. So l descended again with
what patience l could summon. /
picked the hammer up. l wanted to
wiring its neck. But what comes from
wringing a hammers neck? Naught
save the necessity of buying new
hammer.
The hammer was picked up as it de-
sired to be. Again l climbed the lad
der. In the midst of an apparently
speedy dispatch of the labors a new
trouble presented itself. The tree had
changed its tactics and called new
ally to its aid.
This ally was hen-one of my hens.
My back door and only door had been
left open. This hen had entered, was
on my table consuming the remains of
my breakfast and threatening destruc-
ton with her awkward legs and claws
hen that annoys me in this way more
than all the rest. While they are of
foraging in the field she hangs around
that back door bent on thieving and
plumber.
/ cried out "Shoom from above sew
eral times to no purpose. She wouldn't
''shoo!' She paid me no respectful at
tentiOn whatever. She knew well
enough she had plenty of time to clear
out of the house before l could get
down from the tree. l made her sew
eral threatening remarks. She cooked
up one eye, winked atme in a contempt
out manner, and calmly went on peck
ing. | threw several twigs in the house
to no purpose. descended the ladder
and wrathfully drove her out. She
went out as hens general do from any
pent up place, by the longest possible
way, with great risk to window panes
and fragile articles from her fiuttering
wings, and with great cackle and out
cry, as if she deemed it an outrageous
proceeding on my part thus to disturb
her while peacefully engaged in con-
verting the breakfast scraps into fresh
eggs for my own use, which cackle and
cutlery was re-echoed by the head
rOOsters of her community in the field,
as if they too concurred and heartily
seconded her opinion of me.
So rebuked | climbed once more the
ladder. and put myself in position for
mailing on the boXes-a work of some
difficulty, since was obliged to make
my body conform to the shape and re-
quirements of the tree and the various
and contour of its trunk
and branches. Effecting one position,
found that in it l could not strike
blow with the hammer through the
of hostile little limb. In
another 1 could not pull the nails from
my vest pocket. found myself for the
work Immediately in hand constantly
lacking in the requisite number of legs
and arms. 1t seemed to me | could
have kept then and there employed six
or eight more of these members. I
realized then the great advantages for
such kind of work possessed by certain
who could have slung them
selves airily and gracefully from a
branch by their strong and flexible ex-
tension of yertebr.e. leaving all the
arms and legs free for other uses. l
was so rejecting when heard a tiny,
modest drop to earth. It was the gimlet
for which had Immediate use. Ithad
fallen from a vest pocket. A few nails
gently battered after it. Then there
was wrath. But to what purpose?
Gimlets on the earth respond and rise
no more to expletives than do hammers.
The gimlet would not come to me. l
went by the old and usual route to the
gimlet. wondering as again l YEARLY
the ladder if patience to work
oat ones salvation must, like eternity,
be infinite, and if ones charity must be
to cover this total depravitv