The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1884-05-16
Nav aid Won everl The idea ~


comfort, after all, to have lover
who's too big goose to fiirt with othor
girls.
But when | thought it over that
night, while / was taking out my hair
pins, / began to think there might be
more in it than met the eye. didn't
know but it was the intellectual way of
making love.
/ was very cold to him when he
brought me chocolate creams. / told
him I abominated chocolate, and it
was very plain he found it too trouble
some to remember my likes and dis
likes.
Well, then, in the midst Of this, he
had to go to st. Louis on business;
and while he was away l repented
and began to feel sort of soft about
| him.
He had written he was pretty sure to
be home Tuesday evening. | was sit
ting by the window. and the GAS was
turned low, and somehow | felt blue.
/ could see Mrs. Calvin house, where
that horrid Pamela Stonehenge was
staying; and as | was looking, two men
went up to Mrs. Calvin's. It was a hate
full showery night; but they were laugh
ing and talking, and when they put
down their umbrellas l saw something
that made me jump.
Fred has an umbrella with the fun
niest head, an ebony skull With Rhine
stone eyes that flash in the most life
like way, and there that thing was wink
ing at me in the gas-light across the
street, was so mad just cried
regularly hoWled. To think that Fred
would 90 to see her first of all
Well, who should walk in bright and
early the next morning but Fred him
self He looked pale-with remorse, I
thought. But icebergs and polar bears
were nothing to me in the way of cold
ness.
He began: II wanted to see you the
first thing, Marie"
''IndeedP" l interrupted. 81 feel
quite honored"
He turned very red, and stared at
me. Then he said: "What do you
mean? What are you talking about?''
"Oh! of course you haven an idea, .
| said; and so it went on from bad to
worse, until he just got up and re-
marked, with the most dreadful digni-
ty:
You seem to be accusing me of
something; but as you will not do me
the justice to explain yourself, / will
bid you morning and goodbye,
Miss Cassidy"
OF course never, meant him to get
on his dignity, and when / saw him
going | had half a mind to run after
him, only was too proud
Two or three days passed, but still no
sign nor symptom of Fred. Mommer
was getting ready to go to Chautauqua,
and the house was turned upside down,
and was fairly distracted. At last
Just wrote him few lines, telling him
1 wished to explain something.
waited all that day, and all the next,
but no answer came.
Then | got desperate. I just decided
life wasn't worth living, and I'd be SUI
perior, and go in for sociology and
demonology, and all that sort Of thing.
So | told mommer was going to
Chautauqua with her, and she said she
was glad | had awakened at length to a
sense Of my own deficiencies; and we
started of.
1t amt any fun to travel with NOM
mer. She always declares she's suffo-
eating in the Pullman, and she thinks
the trains running off the track eyery
few minutes, and drives the conductors
half crazy asking questions. Then she's
always dropping her eyeglasses and
handbag and Observation-Disclosures
larly her handkerchief. | tell her it's
like the French exercises, sou est le
4aouchoir de ma naere?" But that makes
her hopping mad.
Chautauqua's an awful bore, don't
you know-a lot of old drones and num-
mics going about, and pretending they
enjoy it SO much. | believe they really
hate it, only they think it looks nice to
be profound.
And then Palestine Park! Oh, nv!
how those Eastern people can make
such guys of themselves, and dress in
bags that haven't any hang, or fit or
anything, can't imagine. Mommer
would drag me about every where, to
improve my mind, she said. She has a
mania Tor measurements and calcula-
tons, and one day she was calulatinp
the dimensions of the Great Pyramid.
and | said: ''Mercy, mommer! YOU
must have been evolved from a measur-
ing worm" She didn't like it one bit,
but think she ought to have been glad
l knew how to apply my knowledge.
was so broken-hearted I took up
Hebrew, and it most blinded me. How
people could ever have talked in such a
language!
Well, one day was in the steamboat
on the lake, and Twas looking over my
account book. Pepper always makes
such point of my keeping accounts,
because he says it teaches me the value
OF money, but no one ever knew the
value of money better than do. | had
Gigi with me, and it's awfully expens-
i've boarding with dog; and then the
servants are always so grasping. de-
clare they're just like those horrid
daughters of the horse-leech that said:
Give! give!' though why the daugh-
tiers were q bit worse than the sons /
never could see, only people are always
slandering women.
Somehow or other I never can get
my accounts exactly right. There were
four dollars couldn't account tor, so I
just put them down to "charity,'' be-
cause ''sundries' has such an unbusi.
ness-like look, though, to tell the truth,
I'd only given ten cents to an organ
grinder.
1 was so hard at work that I never
noticed I'd been taken ever so far past
where | ought to have got out. so I lust
stepped out at the next stopping-place,
and waited for another boat to take me
back. 1t was quite pretty spot, with
trees and things, and a sort of cave not
far off; and | sat and sat, and gazed at
the beauties of nature till Twas most
starved. All at once heard noise be-
hind me, and | looked around, and there
was Fred coming out of the cave
thought for moment maybe re-
morse had driven him to retire from the
world and be hermit. Wouldn't that
have been romanticg
glanced at him very haughtily, but
he began right away: Miss Cassidy
oh, Marie! don't let us make ourselves
miserable by keeping this up!''
"Who's miserablePn INQUIRED.