The Opelousas courier., 1884-11-29
FL KING MACHINES.
ssnl Nyo Chances Critically at these
Mechanical Birds.


A long and exhaustive examination
of the history of flying machines ina
bles me to give briefly some of the
main points of few for the benefit of
those who may be interested in this
science.
A Frenchman invented a flying ma
chine, or dofunny, as we scientists
1t, IN 1000 and something, whereby he
could sail down from the woodshed
and not break his neck. He could not
rise from the ground like a lark and
trlll a few notes as he skinned
through the sky, but he could fall off
an ordinary haystack like a setting
hen, with the aid Of his wings. His
name was Besnier.
One hundred and twenty-five years
after that a prisoner at Vienna named
Jacob Dagen, told the jailer that he
could fly. The jailer seemed incredu-
lous. and so Jake constructed a pair of
double-barrel umbrellas, that worked
by hand, and tluttered with this ma
chine into the air fifty feet. He came
down In a direct line and in so doing
ran one of the umbrellas through his
thorax. am glad it is not the U.S.
tom now to wear an umbrella in the
thorax.
In England during the present CEN
fury several inventors produced flying
machines, but in an evil hour agreed
to rise on them themselves, and SO
they died from their injuries. Some
came down on top of the machines,
while others preceded their inventions
by a few feet, but the result was the
same. The invention of flying ma
chimes has always been handicapped,
as it were, by this fact. Men invent
a flying machine and then try to ride
1T and show it off, and thus they are
prevented by death from perfecting
their rolling stock, and securing their
right of way.
In 1912 Mr.. William Henderson got
out a 'two-propeller' machine, and
tried to incorporate a company to util-
lie it for the purpose of carrying let
tiers. running errands, driving home
the cows, lighting the northern lights,
and skimming the q off the milky
way, but it didn't seem to compete,
very successfully with other modes of
travel, and SO Mr.. Henderson wrapped
it up in an old tent and put it away
in tho hayInow.
In 1858 Mr.. j. FL. johnson patented
a balloon and parachute dingus, which
worked on the principle of a ducks
foot in the mud. I use scientific terms
because | am unable to express myself
in the common language of The vulgar
herd. This machine had a tail which.
under great excitement, it would
throw over the dash-board,a s it bound |
cd through the air.
Probably the biggest thing in its
way under this head was the revival of
flying under the presidency of theDuke
Of Argyle. the society being called the
Great Britain a~ronautical society.
This society made some valuable cal
culations, adding much to our scien-
tifie knowledge, and filling London
with cripples.
In 1869 Mr.. Joseph T. Kaufman in
vented and turned loose upon the peo-
pie of Glasgow an internal machine in
tended tosoar considerably III a quiet
kind of a way, and to be propelled by
steam. 1t looked like the bird known
in ornithology as the .6yuptilecrick,
and had IN air-brake, patent coupler,
buffer and platform. It was intended
TO hold two men on ice and a rosewood
casket with silver handles. 1t was
mounted on wheels, and as it did not
seem to skim through the air very
much, the people Of Glasgow hitched
Il clothes-line to it and used it for a
band wagon.
Rufus Porter invented an arialdeW
dad ten years ago in Connecticut
where SO many crimes have been COM
mitted since Mark Twain moved there.
This i al called the 'aroport,' and was
worked by springs connected with
propellers. a saloon was suspended
beneath it, ] presume. on the prinei-
PIE that when d man is intoxicated he
weighs a pound less. This machine
tloated around the rotunda Of the
Merchants exchange, in New York
city. eleven times. like a hen with he
head cut off, but has not been on the
wing much since then.
Other flying machines have been in
vented, but the air is not peopled with
them as 1 write. Most of them have
folded their pinions and sought the
seclusion of the hen-house. It is to-
be hoped that very soon some such ma
chine will be perfected whereby q man
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