davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
A Lady Made . Citizen.
Milwaukee Htsconsin.

AIrs. Emily =. Smith, widow, was
made citizen of the United States in
the Municipal Court this forenoon.
Mrs. smith was born in England in 1910
and came to America when eleven
years of age. She has resided in Mil.
waukee for the past twelve or fifteen
yegrs. The lady went to Dakota last
.pripg and took up homestead near
Harold, and in order to acquire per
feet title to the land she was advised to
rpnounce forever all allegiance to Queen
Victoria and become nsturalized citi-
zen of The United States, her husband
having neglected to take out his second
papers. Clerk Meiswinkle says this is
the 81 eCnd instance of the kind during
his ipcumbency of the Otfice-six years.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
Doctors and Doctrines.
hnleyer Cruel Creeus May Say, I
is Always Orthodox.

"You know the old laying, Doctor, ELi tres
nen,ci dW0 het,--wheIe there are three doc
lois there are Two atheists" laughed Key
Apollo CTeHmcheeSe, the other day. 10 MS
friend, DIR. SIENNA, who had dropped In Tor
bit Of talk.
"I es, i've heard 1t, and III bet box OF pills
against your dry inkstand that some priest
said it; They always battered bad LATIN
when they had bigger lie than common 10
pet rid of" answered the Doctor, lighting his
piIe. ~ tell you, Dominic, you're way Oh
hen YOU think our profession isn't doing rs
good work In this world az yours il. The've
both been morn half barDarOuS for ceut,r'
lee, but we're several lengths ahead OF you
on the home stretch"
ti,uf, Doctor" said Rev. Mr.. Creamcheese,
don't you think your fraternity shows q
"RshW interrupted DR.. SIENNA, we SHOW
terdercy 10 human charity and common
sense. The fences are all down. Why, within
the past week I've had q letter from my old
friend, Or. W. V. Haddox, OF Pine HUI, Ala
bama, saving that he Is using, with great
success, Park cr'6 Tonic In
his practice, and nLds I the best thing Tor
Dyspepsia, rheumatism, and so on, ne ever
struck; and ant ther friend OF mine, DR., j. j.
Oaima an, OF Carroltown, Pa, Gays suhntan'
TALLY the srme thing. Hes big specialist
100. In chronic uiseas es, and knows what he
is talk ing about every time"
DIR. senna's statements as to Fork
er'S Tonic are supported by geuu-
Inc testimonials from Drs. Haddox and ost
man, who write to Msssrs. HisooI q Co. OF
New York-the proprle'ors-in terms OF the
big hest commehdstiOn concerning THIS great
restorative remedy; and letters from tina p. -
fet sion generally CONFIRM the opinion OF TN se
physicians. Price, 50 cents and 81 per totue
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
Proposed I'm n street Car.


The bleak and uniDviting interior of
of street ear, with the Thermometer
,twenty degrees below freezing point,
was tie >ctue of a proposal OF marriage.
The hour Was $50; the car one of the
amber hutd chaTiOts of the Thirteenth
.and FluteLth Streets Line, Philadel-
1hla, ana the Interested parties pretty
girl OF about nineteenth summers, with
bark ey,S aud rosy cheeks, and young
man OF we or three and twenty.
"Ale You cold, Amelia?' came in
gentle tones across the car.
ayes, Charley" was the half wills
pered reply. AID Charley suusSled up
clos aud luDK Amella'S hand IN niS.
81 He tlen glanced at her in n loving
way, looked across at the reporter, VINO
was apparently asleep, noticed that the
conductor was en- rely occupied in
ke piug lis feet warm, and, after Civ
ipg one or two coughs, said, with q
mile:
~ "Dn YOU rscollect what told you the
frst time met you, Amelia.
$40, Charley. Wh&t?"
Why, that bad never been in love
and that Il would be cold day when
No ask gIrl TO marry me-"
II "Oh, yes; but why do you askr
4 "well, this is q very cold day, Amelia,
tisn't it,"
"Ees, Charley; but why%' and she
blushed IS she glanced up at him, and
as his iacr drew nearer hers.
"Wer, will yOup
There v MS y silence for q moment bat
for the jingle, jingle of the bells and the
shufilDg of The conductors feet upon
the icy platform. Then she slipped her
haud IuIO hIs, blushed even roster than
fore, aud whispered, "Ies."
"Blc>s you, my children" exclaimed
the a. lighted reporter; and, Is tue low
CTS half started up sbashed at the unex-
per.,a discovery of their secret the
Scribe Sho, cut VI the doorway and hur-
rtG away.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
CoURIsHIP CoNUNDRUMs.
Mar, - Brittle Lamb shown up in q
New Light,


New Light.
Darling" said he, tenderly encir'
olipg her slender waist with his lar
board arm, "can you tell me in what
respect you resemble Mary, OF little
lamb fame"
mo. | cannot, dear Henry" she ans
wered, blushing one of those Western
sunset bushes that betoken color
weather. -, =.
Because" said he, as he tenderly
stYoked the golden HAIR, "because you
have pet that loves you So" =,
"And now, dear Henry, can you tell
me why you are like Mary's lambs"
"No, dear, WHY am II"
"Because, said she, glanctng ner'
vously toward the door, "because you
are sure to GO hearpspa coming down
the stairs and you know. -,
"Why AN like Mary's teacher%'
thundered the old man, poking bis
head in the door and fondling a seven
pound Indian club,
"Recause," answering himself, CATER
IL o'clock is against the rule and l am
going to turn out"
AS the young man limped painfully
away he was heard to mutter to him
self:
"Well, differ from the larnb in one
respect, for never follow Mary any
mOre!- Pfcksss Sun.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
M EDICAL,
PROOF.

Consumption, Splitting Hood = Ny
friends gave up all hopes OF my recovery. DI
John < smith cured me two years ago.
Robt. Delaney, Martins Ferry. o.
Consumption, Chronic Diarrb9a
Splitting and Passing Blood-I was en- n
81 atsu TO q skeleton. Strength gone. DIR
Smits cured me two years ago, ond now am
we'll. Mrs. Z. J. Nelson, Wheeling, W. Va
Cn,n-rb. PoIypus OF Hose. Loss Of
50 s"fered Tor years Physicians and
-. -. 'niled TO help me, l thought MI
-. % =, uTable. DIR. Smitn cured me com,
Il ,voyears ago. have been well evei
OF speldel q Co., Wheeling, W. Va
Cancer or Breast-Was cut out three
lines by. physlcians- DT; Smith cured me
without the knife. Mrs. II. III. circuit
To the I.adies-DY. Smith hes q method Of
rea'ing falling CT the womb and female
seakness which cures II In ashort time. La
iirs need suffer no longer.
Eind. No one seemed 70 understand the CAS-
OF my d 4ughter. DR.. Smith cured her yea
,go aud she Is now we'll and sliong. -,
Mrs. {. J. Nelson, Wheeling, W. va
FfstuIa I'm Ano, Piles Most aggravated
Was given up 10 die and pronounced incura
ole. On my back fer eighteen weeks. DR.
-mith cured me in i've week. without tht
knife. three years ago, and enjoy bette,
Thos. Colvin, Grocer, Wheeling.
Fits-Ny wife had them for years. Coula
get DO relief DR.. Smith cured her three year
ago, and she has had none since.
kerofuIous Ulcer on Leg for Years
Or. smith cured me two years ago,
Mrs. Cs-n,vTine Phillabaum,
Valley Grove W. va
DR.. Smith viii engage 20 cure any case o.
gi;es, no no after how long standing, withou
be knife. and without the least danger o.
ny Kind,
loss Of Mnah0od-I3r. Smith has made
pec!alty OF this condition which saps thu
,ouIdstion OF health and renders miserabl,
.omany. His treatment will restore health
nd strength in q short time Dr.. SMITH
CONS are so arranged that patients calling X
-ee him do not come In contact with Others
md his business with ladies and gentlemea u
richly confidential.
BLOOD DisOrc ers-Those suffering from
his destroyer OF life may consult DR.. Smith
with perfect assurance
AlhaFt for SelEExamfaAtf0n sent X
patients at q distance on receipt Of two x
,tsm ps, and patleDu thus treated are AWAY
gusrsp Je' d satisfaction.
Consultation Free at once Once hou1
from 2 A. N. TO p. ~, daily, except Sunday.
Call on or address
DR.. J. z. SMITH,
No. 1904 Chapiiue st.,
man Wheeling, ". Va
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
A Phenomenal Kicker.

itL"' n.tWgS-
Please, sir, said the bell.boy to o
texas .t Motel clerk, number forty says
mere SIe amt no towel in his room"
leu him 10 use one of the window
Sufta rs He says, too, there amt
40 tineTs.' Tell him to put his coat
Snu vest under his hesd.h "Aud he
S TaNt' pitcher OF water.u Suffering
.!Iu'. But he's the worst kicker I
NJ bet srCcS IN my life. Garry him no
.e morse psit." He wants to know IL
bi,D oSh have light" "Here, eonfound
bim !, tive him this lantern, and ask
bs Ui u le wants the earth, and if he'll
syssa a lied On only one side or turned
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
HEALTH is WEALTd!

DR.E.C. VESTS NERVE AND BRAIN
- 9REATMtNr a grsrauteed specific TO-
nyA,eris, Dizziness, Commissions, Fits, Ner.
vGus Neuralgia, Headache, Nervous Prostra'
ton caused BY the use OF alcohol or tobacco,
Wakefulnes0, Mental Depression, seftening
Of tie Brain resulting In insanity and lead.
ing TO misery, decay and death, Premature
old Age, Barrenness, Loss OF Power In either
sex, Involuntary Losses and SpermRtorrhRs
caused by over.e1ertton OF the brain, self
abuse or over.iudulgence. Each box con
tsins one months treatment. 500 a box. or
six bOxes for $500, sent by mall prepaid on
rsce int OF price.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
How . Quarrel Was Made Up.

A gentleman of Athens, Ga, once
had lovers quarrel with his sweet
heart, who gave hun back his engage
ment ring, a $3.50 diamond. Deli6er'
ately walking TO the hearth, he threw
the memeDto Of his blighted happiness
on the stone and with his heel ground
il to pieces. He then returned the lady
q ring she once had given him. But
she was guilty of no such out6urst.
Calmly placing it on the mantel, she
remarked, "WelI, I'll need it for NJ
next beau The quarrel was soon ma te
up, and the hasty lover had to invest In
another ring.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
Tricks or Lobby ists at tse Capital.

Ben. PerLey POore's "Reminiscences.
One OF the lobbyists has an attractive
daughter who goes into society anu ex-
tends civilities TO the wives and daugh.
tens of members, while he gives them
lunches and good liquor. Another nrst-
class lobbyist is renowned as poker
player, and never hesitates about losing
a few hundred dollars when he desires
10 ipSratiate himself with the winner.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
He Played the Drum,

-I-TlIIFVca
h mepSsi.stntn," said the Professor TO
~ hsva "a students assembled to clinic,
na,ksbIoo '; , Pointed:Out to you the re-
&Ose SSo trTIuuency to consumption of
II iSIS 10 play upon wind instruments.
seLma,ttsse5 low before US we have .
sse, sTd A : development Of lung dis
Tes:ioDi,l. Vas not surprised to find, on
Nsnber ns IN. 'Ae patient, that he Is q
tootinueg . We brass band. Now, sir"
esOsUnD-i,'Ae professor, addressing the
@aataen TEa VIII you please tell the
Wal Instrument you play
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
1hinnKarfh KnoWine.

A pair OF bedroom curtains sect re-
Gently were very tasteful, and cost but
81. The material was soft, thin, un-
bleached muslin over q yard wide, cost
ing but six cents per yard. Six yards
we're used for each window, making
full loopiDgs. A band Of wheel en-.
broidery done in eoarse crimson and
blue cotton borIered the tuner edge OF
each side, while piece of deep blue
yelveteen passed across the top and
Icopei hack the curtains. Another pSir
OF verv warm ALE pretty curtains USED
In = dining roOm wese made Eli q CAD
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
WE GUARANTEE SIX BOXES

To cure any case With each order received
by u, for six boxes, accom- panied with 500,
We will serd the purchaser our written guar.
sutee 10 refund the money IL the treat ment
does not effect a cure. Guarantees Issued only
bvlOGAN 4 co, SOLE agents, Wheeling. W.
Va, proprietoIs OF Lcgan q Co.'S Pleasant
VI rm Sy, up and Childs Physic. Best In use,
fee eOG&Cg
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
Little Romance from the South.
P.-s,, aku-. 4 Al, \ ftbroafcLe

DH"sIIIy't1E"N I <hstS-T O'''"'''0sSs
A deserving young man Of moderate
means bad an engagement with q
young lady to escort her to the opera
house last night, and when the rain
continued to pour down he looked for
ward with dismay to the hack hire,
which, added to the cost Of the tickets,
would run his bill fearfully high. HIS
mind was relieved in the afternoon by
a note from the young lady stating that
she wished to pO.tpone the engagement
until tonight. She evidently realized
the situation, and, like q sensible glri,
solved the difficulty.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
A STORM OyERCoAT.
IKE Garment that Adjusts the Weather
Regularly.

Regularly.
"What kind of an overcoat Is that
you are carrying"
THAT, sir, Is not a regular overcoat.
1t Is called storm coat. Phew! How
warm the weather is getting"
"Wby Is it called storm coatw
because 1t keeps away storms. When
the weather looks threatening in the
morning just put this on, and before
neon me wind dies down and the SUI
comes out hot enough to roast a brass
money"
But suppose you leave the GOAT at
hCme:"
Then it is sure to storm like fury
Philsdt lphia Call.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
LEFT-HAkDED LUCK.

The Joy OF Boy Who Will Grow Up TO
be an Optinist.
Detroit Free Press.
A little chap who fell on the pave
inert in front of a Woodward avenue
grocery the other day and broke a jug
Jumped up and called out to a boy on
the corner:
isn't that boss?"
"Why, didn't you break the jugm
"Of course I did, but 1t was empty. II
I'd only waited FIVE minutes I'd have
lost hull gallon of 'lssses by the break.
ing. Bet Your boots I'm allus lucky"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
o d Timers Recalling Their Youth.

First ballet girl-What darling little
bresst- pin that is. Who is it for?
Second ballet glrl-It Is birthday
present for my little granddaughter.
First ballet GIRL have seldom seen
q stone so bright. 1t reminCs me OF the
great comet of 15l2.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
..ys,EAK AND UNpEvELopED PARrs

w of the Human Body Enlarged. De.
yeloped and Strengthened" etc, is an inter
In reply TO inquiries we viii say tina there Il,
no evidence OF humbug about this. On the
contrary, the advertisers are very highly in.
snrsed. Interested persons may get scaled
circulars giving all particulars by addressing
Fre Medical Co, p. o. Box SIS, Buffulo. N. Y
- Tolsdn Epe,sfst1 Bes. my6d-we-y
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10

CAsczE AID D., 1y.% s.ss., i :, .. 9
nav snf q csnsss . q. eoa -!
ard only Fssisbis nsshad kooyns 49,
Ssas On cscesy fs,ses:1 - tsss 49,, III
msSs irS~1sssos Silaipsd. C4sssW -
b,ass.ss OF De Uvss.. 0eser!heA - -
i1ms o. eyphiiitin pi.scSr To- " 49,
p.;,,srers and tssfsD0steis fufstelss1 -
nmes I a. Uote 80 % - . dnetng senre
n fu. IA NJ tpteisItv. fansfs Y ~ 80
% >e'D-S ON. y. a gRsA2.
d.l2<s Ffsepys Hafr'sc. Co. Sn'D-
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
CONSUMPTION |!

HAVE A POSITIVE REMEDY FOR rHl
i above disease; By ita use Thousands Of
cates of the wont kir and Of long standing
fave been cured. Indeed, % strong 10 my
faith IN its eflcacy, that Will eeud 10
Bottle Free foeeth or with . valuable trcattse
on this o. ease, 10 any sufferer. Give ex.
pres and r. q. aAdreal DIR. 7. AsLOCUh
fBl Pearl street, New York. no1tWvb
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10

OnG" ~ blays der drum" said the sick
man.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
History f. the BETTER Half OF KnoWl'
edge Medical Director Ship
pens New Work.
Al AVAIL B ATTlE(
IN T. THE woRhD.V

History or Ancient Sea Fighta
History Of Modern Naval Rattles
Pictorial History OF Naval Archftec>
lure.
u Invincible Armada, Nile, Trafal .aI
lake Erie, LISA, New Orleans, Fort Fisher
Mobile Bay, Alexandria, aud many others
The Lives and Work Of } oria, Howe, Nelson
Paul Jones, Perry, Fsrrseut aud other Nays
Heroes No other Rock In any Las
yurse covers the same field. Hs- u
SHIPPENS great abT.ity and htress az The
otnhO- are conoeded by al. A wonderful record
of Patriotism and Valor. tt at will be read by
old ard young. Finely illustrated, CleG
Tyre, Good Paper and Binding, 10 pages
Price S. SeiS Fua-
AGENTS WANTED be.eIpsions and ternss re
Address &c. MeCurdy 4 Co., Cincinnati
Ohio
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
SEEDS ESx Es n xsS c 5Ss TIE

We carry In STOCK full supply OF the
choicest seeds: Red clover, sapllug or Nam
moth clover. Lueesne, Alfalfa, Alsike, VIZ Ire,
ksparsetts and Yellow Terfou cloYers, Tim
otby, Hungarian Grs,<, Millet, German OF
Golden Millet, Blue Grass clean and extra
clean. English Blue Grass, Red Top Orch Ard
Grass, Seed Oats, Barley, Wheat, Buckvheat,
Corn. Potatoes, Onion sets, etc. Also q full
line Of Garden and Flower Seeds, hZricui'
tura, Implements, and FertilizerA Write for
estimate, stating quantity desired: AL or
deJs iccom panied with the cash filled at the
lowest market rates on day OF receipt Write
for our illustrated catalogue ]. u. McCUL
LOUGHS SONS Agricultural and Feed W are
house, lSI and 1ss Walnut Street, Cincinu At.
Ohio. Established Nov. Hs0 iasso:
A GENTS WANTED FOR. THE PICru
n RIAL Complete stock Doctor. en- br &c
Ing horsss, cattle, sheep, swine, poultry. oes,
ard dogs By Hon. ]: Perism, 81 the "Prairie
Farmer" and DR.. A. II. Baker, v. 2. Cover
every subject Of Farm atnck, In Health sno
Disease. Two charts for telling ages OF horses
and cattle; III engravtpgs and six coiore5
plates. Farmers clear Siaa - mu1tt- Act
now, For sSsildSs terr,tn,y, eo2s'sr tto
81 Louis. No. q New Iotk. dei2sh
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1884-02-10
ICDRE FITS!

= 20 6N8 l. = = ~
llyHKN SAY CURE DO NOT MEAN
w merely to stop them for q time and
then have them return again. mean radt
cal cure. have made the dfecaAs OF fiA
EPILEPSY OF Falling sickness lifelong study
warrant my remedy TO cure the worst cases
Becaute others have failed b no reason foi
not now receiving . cure. Send 81 oncs fora
sn,edy. Give EIpreas and Postones. II
costs you nothing for trial, and ! will cure
YOU. Address DR.. Il @. ROOT, LIB Pear street,
NeW York nodtscv
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1884-05-09
Importance Of Marriage.

Don't rush into matrimony girls. Re-
main single till you are well IN the TWEEN
ties, when Jody and mind are alike well
developed. You cannot over estimate
the Importance of thorough knowledge
of the man whom you design to marry.
Uprightness, fxedness of principle and
unselfsh and generous disposition, with
good business abilities, should be regard
ed as Indispensable If young man is
good son and brother he will make a
good husband provided you oyour part.
Do not be won by triies. A handsome
face, fine figure, noble bearing, may
be desired but they constitute but small
part of what you really need. Neither is
it wise to aspire far al owe your present
station in life, as this would give rise to
solicitude lest you fail to adapt yourself
/ to your changed circumstances. Marriage
should not be entered upon without a
knowledge of its physiological laws, else
much domestic misery may be expected.
Neither should it be sought for worldly
gain or position. Never, as a wife,
neglect those graCes and charms which
won your lover. Never consider it too
much trouble to dress tastefully, and in
your best, for your husbands eye. Give
him freely of those graceful and pleasant
surprises, which will make him happy,
il you expect Il continuance of those
lovcr-like attentions from him Hide all
the disagreeables in person, toilet and
home, and keep the best for love. Such a
course would be likely to make a good
man of bad one, if anything would. He
has taken you "for better, for worse;''
but do not allow yourself to appear, like
the wife of poor Lo, "all worse and no
better. y Hdeely Magazine.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1884-05-09
Faiihnln Dog.

A vpunp farmer while hunting ior soine
stray cattle, was thrown from his hoise,
the fall breaking his leg. The wea'nel
was bitterly cold, and an exposure OF any
length must have resulted fatally W nav
to do he knew not; and was about reslsn-
ing himself to what seemed to re uo-
cree of fate. when he thought OF his uoS
which accompanied him in his searcn'
thinking perhaps he could be OF assist
anee 10 him in his need. Taking a clga-
fette paper from his pocket, he with ulI !,
Guilty indicted a note to his family, briefly
stating his condition and asking that help
be Immediately sent him. Then taking
his handkerchief he placed the note In a
knot and fastened it around the dog
neck and sent him home. The DOG
started, leaving his helpless master lying
on the frozen ground hoping against
hope that his messenger would prove
faithful to his trust. He did prove true
to the confidence reposed in him, and ar
rived at the young mans home complete
ly exhausted from his travelling over the
distance intervening between the place
where his master lay helpless and his
home. The dogs strange actions and
his exhausted condition attracted the
attention of some members of the family,
who discovered the handkerchief around
the dogs neck and the note it enclosed,
detailing the condition of young Smith.
Assistance was at once sent, and the
young man brought home where medical
attendance was furnished him. The dog
from that day has been raised from the
&C ndition of ordinary CANNES, and every.
thing that can tend in any way to make
a dogs life one continued round of hap.
piness has, and will be done.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1884-05-09
A Solid Home Virtue.

Economy is a virtue which is needed
everywhere. No matter if persons are
rich or have large incomes, they should
be economical To waste is wicked.
There are better ways to spend money
and goods than to waste them 1t is the
poorest use they can be put to. Many
people would be economical if they knew
how. 1t is an art to practice ecoRomy
To do it we'll one must know til -
All can have it if they will. 1t is al
arithmetical art 1t is the conclusion Of
numbers. All must live and ought to
live well, but how to live best at the
least expense is the work of figures to tell
We must count the cost of ways and
means and compare them. Many people
use expensive articles of food and dress
when cheaper ones would be in every way
better and more scrviccablc. Especially
in regulating the table expenses is there
a great want of economy A little useful
Information concerning the qualities Of
food, the amount and kind of nutrition
matter they contain, the wants of the
human system and the best way Of cook
ing, would often save fully one third and,
in many instances, half the expense. A
wise economy in table expenses is favora-
to health, and in this way saves time,
drugs, expense and doctors bills, flesh,
strength and happiness.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1884-05-09
What a Detective Discovered.

eyes, " said the noted detective, "
have seen great many queer things il
my short experience -
discovered a good many gigantic
frauds, | suppose" ventured an admirer
"Well, should say so, was the reply
but between you and me, the most com
plete piece of deception ! ever saw was
woman, young, pretty and | would have
sworn she was an angel.
"But she wasn't?o
81 should say not She has a temper
like whirlwind and when she gets mad
the very earth seems to shake
"Good gracious! And how did you
manage to get down to her true charac
teri"
"Well, I-ahem-the fact is, married
her"