davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17
WIT AND WISDOM.

-"Bless mer' exclaimed an old lady,
''take that key right out of your mouth,
Bessie; I've heard of so many folks dy-
ing with lock-jaw here lately"
"A lady once said. half in fun and
l.alf in sadness: "They talk of persons
with stregth of mind, but when it comes
to strength of don't mind, my son Will
liam surpasses any one 1 ever knew"
An Indiana editor was knocked
down and robbed of S1.65 recently.
Will editors never learn that it is dan
gerous to carry their wealth about them
when they go out at nights. Paul
Herald.
"A correspondent asks: please ad-
wise me what bald head denotes. l
find some people grow bald sooner than
others" We have always labored under
the impression bald head denoted an
absence Of hair.-OH CITY BHzzard.
What influence has the moon upon
the tidep' asked the Professor. The
class wag replied that he did not know
exactly what influence it had upon the
tied. but that it had q tendency to make
the united awfully spoony. = Troy
Times.
Don't waste your time.
Any day is too long to be spent In vain,
Some good should come as the hours go by.
Some lowered glance may be raised on high.
And life is too short to spoil like this;
: II only n prelude. it may DO sweet;
Let us bind together its threads of bliss,
And nourish the flowers around our feet
Mrs. Jones'" exclaimed Smithers,
saunterihg into the breakfast-room,
''the war in China has removed one
serious cause for complaint against
you.' Against me-" replied the pre-
siding matron from behind the urn.
"Yes; 1 gee that the market reports
quote tea as being stronger. Chicago
Tribune.
She was reading the latest fashion
paper in her elegant drawing-room.
'They are wearing diamond buttons
this season." she remarked to her hus-
band. ut would be nice for you to get
set for your pantaloons." eyes, my
DEAR" no replied, ..but can not afford
that luxury" "Why not?" she asked
in amazement "You have an income
of many million a year" Yes, my
love. know that, but I can't afford to
buy q new set every week, and You
know I haven't time to learn to sew"
~. y. Graphic.
why is it that the employees in
telephone offices are all. ladies?" Mrs.
Brown made this inquiry of her hus-
band. WELL" answered Mr.. Brown.
1.-THE managers of the telephone COM
panies were aware that no class of en-
ployes work so faithfully as those who
were in love with their labor, and they
knew that ladies would be fond of the
work in telephone Offices" "What is
the work in telephone Officer" Mrs.
Brown further inquired. Talking"
answered MIR. Brown, and the converse
ton came to an end. = SOn,eyUille
Journal.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17
Blankets and Soiled Clothes.

81 want to have my blankets washed
before the real cold weather begins"
said the young housekeeper to her friend
the handy housewife,
"But do you know how to have il
done. my friend?" said the handy house.
wife.
mo? Then will tell you. In the
first place, you want to oversee the
matter very closely or perhaps your
washwoman. however good in intent.
win spoil them for you. shake your
blankets out nicely, and then put them
into a tub full of hot soap-suds, into
which ten cents worth of ammonia has
been poured. Let them remain for five
or ten minutes and after they are thor
oughly washed and well wrung out put
into another tub OF hot water with am
mnnia- When thoroughly clear and
clean, have them wrung out as dry as
possible, stretched and pulled into
shape, and hung in the sun to dry.
When about half dry they should be-
stretched again. Now, il you will fol-
low my advice your blankets will be as
good as new, and as soft as when first
purchased. The ammonia keeps them
from shrinking, and you should always
use it, my dear, when Hannels are being
washed.
II want to show you." she continued
as she led the way to the parlor, ''what
= really pretty and useful wood box
have made. You see, we have an open
fire in the winter and in the evenings
we burn pine knot So I devised this
arrangement in which to keep the wood.
/ think it would prove useful to people
living in fat or apartments. The way
L made it was first to get nice large
peach-crate, which is very easy to do AZ
this season of the year. Then painted
it walnutbrown and gave it a coat of
varnish. l Just put it on the hearth.
keep it filed with wood, and ornament
it by that large bow of crimson ribbon
tied on to one end.
where do | keep my soiled clothcs?''
said the handy housewife. "Oh, have
q clothes-hamper, but then I have a
pretty bag made for each bedroom.
You know it isn't always convenient for
people to be running to the hall clothes
press, so made a good-sized bag for
each bedroom out of prettily colored
chintz, with running string at the top.
and this is hung up on the closet door.
"Then l have shUe bags, too. in each
ROOM" she continued. II do 50 dis
like to see slippers and shoes thrown
under the bed. To make one buy one
yard of calico and double one end up
within half foot of the rop to make it
into bag. The bag sew into two
compartments, bind it all around with
bright crimson braid and tack it up to
the inside of the closet or wardrobe
door. Slippers can 60 in one side and
shoes in the other. Then they do not
get dusty and always know whe.e to
lind them."-N Y journal.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17
FACTS AND FIGURES.

| american railrods use moro thar
10. 000, 600 iron car wheels. Four wheel.
weigh one ton.
| In the United States the averags
cost of food to the working classes il
one-third the value OF labor, in Grca
Britain it is one-half, and in France
still more.--N. 7. Herald.
More than GO, 600 New Workers live
/, at the hotels, and there are 100, OOt
strangers in town every night. Oyel
| $50. 200. 600 are invested in the hote
business in the metropolis--N. y. Star
Paris has 1900 acres in parks. or
one acre 10 every thirteen inhabitants
in Vienna the proportion is one acre tc
100 persons; in Chicago, one to 200; in
Philadelphia, one to 800; in Brooklyn,
one to $50; in New York one to 1, 1863.
Chicago Herald.
| The revised schedule of property
valuation of the State of Minnesota,
prepared by State Auditor Braden,
gives the total valuation of real prop
erty as S307. 400. 600, and that OF per
sonsl S7S, 9SI. 40l. As compared with
that of 1888. this shows an Increase in
the realty Of S51. 49O, 900.
The big stone tower of the Phila-
delphia public buildings, now under
process of erection, will be finished by
the end OF the season of 1886, and will
then be $40 feet high. From that ele.
walton the iron-work commences, and
goes 1S5 feet higher, until, to the
crown of William Penn's hat, the
height of 535 feet is reached. The
browning piece in the circle forming
the lower part of the tower is q single
stone weighing thirty-two tons. hsla-
,lelphiG Press.
Particulars have been published re-
garding the proposed ship canal across
Ireland. The length is intended to be
127 miles. with thirty locks. Naviga-
ton would be effected by towage sys-
tenn, and it is estimated that the passage
from Galway Bay to Kingstown would
be accomplished in thirty hours. For
ships of 1850 tons the cost would be
Si0.OO0,000; for ships of $500 tons,
$50, 600, 900, and for ships of 5000 tons.
800. 100000. The projected width at
the surface is 200 feet, and at the bot
tom 100 feet.
When pure, platinum is as soft as
silver. but by the addition OF iridium it
becomes the hardest of metals. The
great difficulty in manipulating plari-
mum is its excessive resistance to heat
A temperature that will make steel run
like water and melt down fire clay has
absolutely no effect upon it. You may
put piece of platinum wire not thicker
than q human hair into blast furnace
where ingots of steel are melting down
all around it and the bit of wire will
come out as absolutely unchanged as If
it had been in an ice-bo x all the time
~ Y. Sun.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17
.KHEs EHE eoRN's A.rALx1s' q

Gentia oxvf,,r,, centla ovftrr1f
We q h,,,,,,ner baip't ye novi
xv;,h 20. ,sn;nt o., iiia az nat;"n
Taot;,s srr,,oa as al csae,;o,, -
E,tb yer dahs NJ rod an. veiIer
Sticr LII fase ta, h,p,sb an hon1h
va
VIA a da;sv ba;n,t va ovtunf
xF;,h -. ros;as IN, ~ 4 brock 8 E
Luxe live caeIs Of Arc s-elowiu'.
Sn,aok dam in tho greeI,. iafI, moyiu'
An YES oenfians torn and tattered.
lie RIM nicfers in a hook.
v-re a simmer there's no doubtful
With Yer woods am swamps a-drin
with the black birds lest so busy
T'hat nv head gets iigbt an dizzy ~
with a1iistenjnF fer their after.
An the wiery. fjgbtiu clatter ID
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17


Prof Rauey Bumuus .was arrested
battery. and was arraigned before Judge
Muckle. that learned man of much JUS
tice.. Colonel Max Hoyett, tho ag-
grieved. made q statement which clear
ly showed that the assault was nnpro-
voked. and Judge less wise than
Muckle might have lined Prof. Bumpus
without needing the statement of the
defendant
Judge" said the professor. al will
mako statement Of my case. Then
we shall see whether or not nv violent
actions were inspired by an impulse of
the avenging justice. am professor
OF psychology, and receive SALARY of
thirty dollars per month. 1 rent a
small cottage where wife and live and
enjoy ourselves as well as could be OK
pected under the thirty dollar circum-
stances. but truly did the wise Roman,
detellus Numidicus, say: We can not
i've comfortably with woman and can
aat live at all without her, But for
ora thing. our life would be happy
"a ugh to answer all purposes. Every
evening Colonel Max Hoyett persists
in driving by my house. He has a
beautiful turnout. When nv wife secs
it she becomes eny;ous. Sometimes,
while We are sitting among the vines on
the porch, taking of tender poets and
writers of glowing prose, Coloael
Hoyett and wife dash by in their gilt
tering buggy. In a moment all is
changed. My wife becomes morose
and snappish. Yes she exclairns,
that man who runs a bone mill
and gathers up spoiled meat for
soap factory can ride out in
his fine buggy. but You must
sit here like an unsightly toad NV
deas. don't sit like toad. do not sit
with my hands and feet on the floor
Don't you try to make fun of me on
thirty dollars month. You used to
say that knowledge is power, and be-
lieved you. but now | know better
try to be pleasant and reply: 'Oh.
knowledge Is power. my dear, but of
course 1t is not 80 powerful as spo led
meat We'll, she snapped, I'D
rather have a little less knowledge in
the house and little more meat of
some kind. With that. she founces
away, and during the entire evening we
as long as thought forbearing virtut
demanded L callet on Colonel Max
Hoyett and explained how / was stu
ated. told him if he would select
some other street it would be q great
favor, and, in my opinion. would, IN
the language of the pulpit. have great
tendency toward redeeming a lost and
envious world. He smiled supercilious-
ly and said that he would think about
it. BY the way he continued. i am
going to drive out now, and as my wife
Is hot going can take you home l
declined. but he insisted. The 10y
came around with the team. and af.er
he had promised that he would stop
when within two blocks of my house
and let me get out | consented. Away
we went like the wind. Hold on, said
i, and let me go down. He pretended
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17

az All vommunicafions FOR MS paper
should be accompanies By tie name OF the
as an evidence of good faith on the par. OF
the writer. Write only on one side of the pa
per. BE particularly earefsl in giving name
aEd distinct 81
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17

"A mans domestic relations don't
bother him half SO much as the rela-
tions Of his domestic. IN. o. City lem.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17

"A California vine. grower gathered
seven tons of Zinfandel grapes from an
acre of vines this season.--Saa Frfsa
cisco CHRONICLE. l.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17

Since 1861 the American people
have built 10000 miles OF railroad.
CaicaQo Herald.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1884-10-17

| Il
of mixed up. MIR. Herder, nursed by
us all, struggled slowly back to life.
Mrs. Herder could not do enough for
f. Thumpy, and as for that George Brad
ley, he acted as though she belonged to
| him.
began to realize about this time that
the prospect of our model old maid $
hall was growing beautifully less. 1t
did not improve my temper when the
cold weather began to threaten and we
with whole month yet to stay. When
November did come it found us fairly
showed in with no possible hope of es-
cape. Of course there was no use fret
ting. but that was no excuse for the OK
aggerated cheerfulness with which
Thompy met this misfortune.
The long winter days, hopeless and
relentless, dragged BY. There were
two people, though, who did not find
tbs days too dark, or the winter too
long, but it is rather slow fun for a
third party to watch the progress of
love-making through long Dakota
winter.
When the late, cold spring finally re-
leased me, l turned my back on nv
ruined estate and blasted hopes, and.
leaving the happy lovers behind
lac (their claims joined), 1 found
my way back to tie Sixth Ward school,
house, a sadder, poorer, and. l hope, a
wiser woman.
Ny quarter section and my winter in
Dakota cost me just SS00.23 (and
can't afford 10 spend the two cents in
chocolate creams), to say nothing of my
ruined castles in Spain and the loss Of
my frieod. Now, if any one wants this
valuable property, he can h.ve it On
'1ong time and easy terms. Chicago
Tribune.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-04-04

s..s S n - -
Last Fall, il conn I,any IL hia
ilI- -law. j allles nm T,ll
ghbor Mr. George lsstiek knaet
n Sliyins near Spriing field Ohio M Iars
lem went on 4 nuttiing and hui
position To Gil fton, a Hid III
spot near the bead dwaters 81 the ii
one point tte rocilk u rise to 4 iijl
|sof 100 feet Of more along the sttsain
and contain mans sisanres and small
caves All the hunting par Wind tillll
ins around these i fSck V narrow
path oneof them slipp ped, !, and ID falling,
his feet scrap the side 81 the rsocsls
below the path ,sltiil he tinaIiy
got 4 foothold on III ledge u few i,
|sshdloN He imrns saiateiy rscovered him
sell and on lookiing Sats the pisce where
he had slid down ttiiis roek, lie was sl.r 4
prised 70 see that his ffeatt IN Tipping
laid bare . hole in d side of the rock
BY brushing aside some s,ilidergr
which had concealel It. he imma iliatelyyI
called the ottlh hers, and soon I'LL were
standing on the narrow edge below the
path locking at the rocks tho
remaining ndsrbrnsh had - sre-
moved The opening WAS fouH7 TO be
about three os four feeti: iii size
IA damp wind was lowing from the
mouth ef the olseIiiilg with consid derable
elranglits The oarty mad q ID cursory
exalninati one, with - bit of
lighted candle, hich showed nothing
hut a narrew passagc al bout I'D WentN Feet
IN LEM gth turning a abIurt ~ to tho right.
.s1ae floor was 9streNl with tlle zones sof
birds and small animals. eheying TINT
litsMas only one off the many caves with
which the segiers al al,ounds. the party
with tile exception of Afr. Harlem who
wGs much interes III the cave aban.
doned tie ~ plorattii ion: hey cantion-
ed him I'd sos on his guard Against con
cealed cIeh and told him to fire llis
sg1ti If he need hel Harlem, aftRr
lighting d candle aud getting his shotr
gllns read for act tion,, elltered the open
inR on hands and knees sIiiA tom
Iof the passage Was tlr bnt the IN Blows
ind through 1t yva. dam snil Hick ening,
causing the can d ia ID burn linn urIGa tbiue.
taroping ceatiousla ior, abotzt sents
[feet #ths asiven AZ tos the turn
which led into III larg chamber 81 the
cave Just as He turned ttllle cosIlgr IA
stun led md siill ing hinaself pnt
Ihis hnnd i hi tlie ti,s,r of she cave here
The was shocked To feel nd thing round
and smooth, S
Sterling back ital terror lie raised tlle
L
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-04-04

n
s;ss M q spss .y IA I'ss ,,i,, 80 II
III s,, sa
Il,
ss,Si ~
q .ss, .s IL
-. hi s; M
A , 81, D,
sss''osss s.ss Z .,oe = a.'o.,' aNs.
M 80 .s.s II ss;s,s ss,,;,. ,
~ Il. =. Z,
.s,.s 's,ss III.
NJ.
T;a4 m s.esass
W., ..i Z.
q - IS
,sss q G M 4 ha - s 81. q, .s,,s
man now when tlsSs chances are ten tos
one that he "a cauga & and punished.
si But lae. like the rest of the tribe are
starving aud th store stesI, rate &
Bad ,ands Cot lbcv 4, &, is Che un-s
;nua i hi u NJ Il thoronal K scat an. ,,ar,.sr:
n, Is,
:
slast peeoming 3 noted .s'atfle l'olns =.
syivf,s "a an sy,l
IA
~ ,satts IA Yba
vest The nalna Il of, tllea ,,aper3 calls
attention III sthts' tNo th;inus ssoncerniinp
which the itor, z. kard wishes
% g change pubic opinion, as tas bag
LANDS ore not bad put very good, and
bays & a ~ oa c;t;1an.. ;s
exceptions have formed 4 public; oy oyinion
against them
The Northwestern, Omaha q and
Northern Pacific rai ilroads have issued d
i special joint freigLt tariff Announcing
| the rate .on ali Black hills freight. ext
cent ex1,l l1,siiyes Ara classes hiirksf than
drst-class. vim Did 'lS kin,son, Dsk from
saa asss' e q sssss Ass'as slis.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1884-04-04
Beau iflll Town.

The Brnle County AgricuI-
tural Fair Grounds adjoin the
tOWnsite and IS one of the best
fair grounds in the Territory.
with . rood hal Emile track.
The Russellville Democrat. [volume] (Russellville, Ark.) 1875-1898, 1884-10-30

1t Is useless To try to cnnincrate the
MANY kinds and qualities, hiIt snflice
me to say | have the largest, finest,
most complete stock OF Boots aud Shoes
ever brought within the borders OF
Pope county.
No lady should fail to examine our
Bryan, Brown Il Co., hand made shoes.
every pair of which we positively guar
antee to give satisfaction or the money
refunded. In like manner we guaran-
tee our celebrated Saller, Levin Siioc
to the gentlemen. We have shoes for
NIL, and our shoes fiji a heap ri feet;
Mems Tap Brogans at sl.l0 selling
other places ut 81 40.
Mems Best Brogans at sl.25, SELF /:
other places at $l.65.
Women's full stock Kin Shoe Sl0a,
selling other places at 5 80.
Childrens shoes at cost.
Ladies fine Kid button shoes at 81 .25,
selling other places at 200.
Ladies' fine Pebble button shoes at
1925, selling other places at 400.
Ladies glove grain button shoes at
1.25, selling other places at 200.
Ladies glove grain Lace shoes at 20,
selling other places at LIS.
Ladies fine Kid front Lace shoes at
l.25, selling other places at l.75.
Ladies fine Pebble front lace shoes at
l.25, selling other places at l.75.
Mems Hand made Kip boots at 2.oO
worth $50.
Mems Hand made Calf boots $50
worth 800. All other shoes at reduced
prices.
The Russellville Democrat. [volume] (Russellville, Ark.) 1875-1898, 1884-10-30
Hardware.

This department. Of my business has
assumed such proportions and Is so
well supplied that iu Is often mistaken
for the Hardware Store. Pl0ws of all
kinds can be hal here from the cheap
est cast pillow ut 200 each to the finest
polished steel plows. NV line of Shelf
Hardware is also complete, consisting
of cutlery, files, hammers, hatchets.
saws, locks. butts, screws, axes, &c.
My celebrated, j. l.. Shinn axe and the
Keen Kutter axe LOO each are the best
and cheapest IN the market. | handle
nails by the car load which enables me
to give the closest figures. The Oliver
chilled plnw can also he found in my
stock and has no equal In the world. l
sell it at the factory prices. keep on
hand square packing. sheet packing
aud gum betting of all kinds.
The Russellville Democrat. [volume] (Russellville, Ark.) 1875-1898, 1884-10-30
Dry Goods, Notions &c.

We have just replenished this depart
ment with ALL the latest novelties, in
Ribbons, Buttons, Zephyr, Zephyr
Shawls, Hoods, Nubies, Baby Csps,
velveteens, Silk, Velyets, Dress goods
of all kinds, &c.
The ladies are especially Invited to
call and inspect these goods, as 1t Is
only by keeping ON the good side OF
them we are able to reach their hns-
bands pocket books. We quote only a
few OF the many bargains we are now
offering:
10 doz. pair Ladies colored Hose at
6L cents, worth 10.
IL doz. pair Ladies colored Hose at
Ga cents, worth 10.
25 pieces Worsted Dress goods at Ga
cents, worth 10.
20pieces Worsted Dress goods at ga
cents, worth 10.
Is pieces Worstcd Dress goods all
wool Is cents, worth %.
100 pieces Calico at 3 cents, worth 81
20 pieces all wool Linsey at 1873 cts.
worth %.
5000 yds. A Heavy Brown Sheeting
at Z cts. worth 0.
$500 yds. "a Heavy Brown Sheeting
at Ga cts, worth S13.
5000 yds. Best heavy Cotton checks
at 8 cts, worth 1873.
NV Ladies NKw CLoAKs and DOL.
MANS are cheaper than have ever be-
fore seen, and are selling for oSE HALF
what they did LAST YEAR.
The Russellville Democrat. [volume] (Russellville, Ark.) 1875-1898, 1884-10-30
"A CARD.

Owing to the increase In my bus
mess | have moved to the north side OF
the railroad, to the commodious brick
store room in the Ford q Bost block
the room on the west corner Of the
block. | have room 100x20 feet,
shelved from the floor up, and filled
for 60 feet in front with my drug and
notion stock. In the rear end have
mt good stock of staple groceries
consisting of bacon, hams, lard. rice,
coffee, sugar. butter, cheese, crackers,
and many other articles too numerous
to mention.
am buying my drugs and groceries
fer The cash and selling at short prof
its.
have just received good stock OF
Lynchburg, Va, tobacco and cigars.
Also have good stock of best double
roll plate iewelry that will wear equal
to solid gold aud costs two-thirds less.
Money can be saved by calling on me.
Prescriptions carefully put up at all
hours.
With thanks for past liberal patron
age, subscribe myself
Your Obedient Servant,
DIR. w. S. HINTON.
Atkins, Ark, Oct. s, 1884.
The Russellville Democrat. [volume] (Russellville, Ark.) 1875-1898, 1884-10-30
Groceries,.

keep everything in this line except
Fancy Groceries, consisting of Flour,
Sugar, Coffee, Rice, meat, Lard, Tobac-
co, Molasses, Soda, Pepper, Spice, Salt,
&c. quote only few prices, Bit
guarantee satisfaction on all others:
8ibs choice coffee for LOO; ID lbs
choice brown sugar for LOO; 10000 lbs
good Family Flour Mt $3.50 per 100 lbs.
] have just received ear OF Fancy
Patent Flour in 25 Id and 80 lib sacks
and want all lovers of good biscuits
to give IL trial as 1t Is fine and guar
antee every pound sell. The closest
prices OH meat, lard aud all other gro
ceries. Begging and Ties at cost.