The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1884-12-06
A TRUE TALE.
A Drummer" Who Exhibited his Wares
to Two Inquisitive Ladies.

all tnOSe people VINO are eternally narp-
ing on the wickedness of drummer"
will read and reflect on. We have met
hundreds Of people, who, if you tell them
a certain man-say Strangers a
drummer, will hold up their hands in
their horror and declare that there can
be nothing good about him. In other
words, no matter how much of a gentle
man he may be, the mere fact of his be-
ing a drummer damns him forever.
A little fact has come under our OBJ
servation that shows what foolishness it
is to judge a man by his looks.
The other day we were on the Chicago
& Eastern Illinois road, starting on a
shooting trip. Just in front of us were
two women-we won't call them ladies,
for they were of the stripe of women
who are regular fanatics and ALWAYS
know more than anybody else, especial
ly about other peoples business. With
them was a poor, hen-pecked looking
man, who was probably the husband of
one of them. At station there got on
the car a nice looking man with large
flat valise in each hand. He was well
dressed, wore buster, and had good,
honest face. He had sandy beard and
light hair, and his face was forid, as is
always the case with men of his STYLE
He nodded his head in our direction and
sat quietly down in one of the front
seats, and commenced reading the
paper
Then the women commenced.
Ibid you see that nasty drummer git
onP" said number one
yes" said number two. Il jist de-
spise them. They go around like pack
of wolves and they do anything that S
mean and low: l wouldn't trust one of
'em a minute
'.How do you know he is drum
merP" meekly interposed the hen-pecked
husband
.KnowP How do know?n said num-
Der one. "Why, | can tell 'em as fur
as / can see 'em. Them things they
call grip-sacks give 'em away. This
fellow has got two. guess he's got a
lot of samples in one and big whisky
bottle, and pack of cards, and whole
lot of letters from girls all over the
country in the other one. 0, pity his
poor wife"
''How do you know he's marriedp'
ventured the husband.
"Know! Why them fellers have got
wives all over the country. They jist
bewitch these innocent girls and marry
em, and then 60 off on trips and leaves
em, but they generally have one poor
wife and lot of children off East some
where, and the poor thing has to sup
port 'em all, while the drummer is CAD
din round the country playin' cards. y
Yes said number two. s'You'r re
jist right; they oughter all be in the
penitentiary. They're a depraved set.
Now, just look at that fellows face
See how red it is? I'll bet he drinks a
quart of whisky every day. | never
seen anything so red in my life. Now,
just know he's got a big flask in each
of them sample cases. And did you
see the cheek he had to bow to us when
he came in, and here we never saw him
before; the cheeky wretch.
Now, we happened to know the gen.
tleman, and knew his business, and we
thought it a good chance to put in our
oar, especially as we knew it was to us
he nodded and probably never noticed
the virtuous females at all. so putting
on sweet smile, we leaned forward
and said:
Ladies, see you know something of
the world. Drummers are hard set,
aren't they?'
They looked at us moment, and then
said: Eyes, sir, hope you don't as
sociate with them
80, no, madam, not for the world.
live down in Evansville, and down
there the people won't walk on the
same side of the street with them at
all. (How was this for gall from a
fellow that went ON the road when only
seventeen, and drummed ten yearsO
.Wcll, I'm glad they treat 'em as
they deserve down in Evansville. Do
you know that whisky faced teller up in
front?'
''Never saw him BEFORE" said we,
with a truthful air; "but I'd just like to
play trick on him and make him show
those whisky bottles he's got in his
valises."
go, wouldn't that be nice, said one;
show could you do it?''
"You just leave it to me-" we went
on. ''Tll rope him back here, and tell
him that two ladies are very much inter-
ested in him, and it will be just like his
cheek to come back and open his valises
and show. you lot of letters from girls
just to show you what a masher he is. y
80, how nicen' they cried, clapping
their hands with glee. ''You get him
back
We went forward and simply said to
the alleged drummer: s.Henson, there
are two nice Christian ladies back there
who want to look at your samples.
think they can help you along"
Henson threw down his paper and
grabbed his valises, and came back.
He threw hack seat and while opening
the vase said:
'.La1ics. / thank you for sending for
me. am minister at Milford, and OF
course don't get much salary, and
during my summer vacation l try t,
make little money for my wife an,
babies by working on commission for
the American Bible Society; now, dc
you see any of these that you likeen
and he threw open both valises COM
pletely filled with copies of the Bible,
from the cheapest up to the nicely
bound ones that are usually kept on
center tables.
What the women said we don't know;
we lit out for another car; we didn' t
want to be snatched bald-headed, but
we had kind of sweet feeling that
we had shown those vinegar-faced
females ''that you can't most always
tell. "-EUQnsUille ArQus.