The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1884-09-25
SUPPLEMENTS
SOMETHING ABOUT sHopLIFTERs
An Aesthetic Floor Walkers Views
Elegantly Expressed KEEPS,
Snaps, Gcnnines. and lnc0r
rigibles.
Air-Drawn DlstlnctIons-A Dry Goods De-
tectfye's Views More Bluntly Venti.
lnted-Odd Accidents Exposing tho
Methods OF Counter Thieves.
Now York sun. |

lie was tall, lathily framed, scrupuiously
barbcred, aud fashionably onycloped. Had
he been woman, his figure would have been
termed willowy, but, though his features
were efIeminatc, there was a perceptiblc
stcclincss In their otherwise blond yacutty.
A feline alertncss distinguished his casy-go-
Ing, lounging strut. lie had foxy china.
blue eyes that seemed to appropriate every
ninutie Of tho long ustomcr-throngcd conn.
tors within their scope, and to inspire amid
the ranks Of prsttiiy aproned snlcswomen and
Sinking male jumpers either increased un.
easincss or industry. ''Thc duties Of q floor
walker may be called manifold" he said,
when he found leisure to answer few OF tho
Sun reporters queries.
ut IL noble aud intricate profession"
the reporter obsesver.
s'iou are right, sir, aud but few can pur-
sue the career with profit and cclat Indeed,
the thorough paced floor walker, Hike the poet,
Is born, not made. lie has to sec that tbs
salespeople are not remiss In their duties. II
Is Ills lookout that the porlcrs and door open
ers toe tho mark. The secret incentive 81
the cash imp's celebrity Is his lightning glance.
The shoppers demands would scarcely be
expedited but for his ubiquitous revision.
The counters would never he cleared for nc
tion. Attcrs sklrmish with the .pnllcrs,'
save through the portcnt Of hts knitted brows.
His smile Is courtcd. his displeasure feared.
There Is sunshine In his complaisance, foul
weather Ia his chars!n. He can fondls merit
In its golden incipicncy, or skewer y peeca-
dillo - its crimson core. LASTLY, but most
", no IL the Argas-eyed terror Of shorllftefs,
iInpecunious gaWks, aud prohtiess lockers
around
But do not great establishments like this
employ detectives to look after shopliftersi"
"Ycs, sir. Ours has two. But bless you,
they are mere detectives, nothing morol !,
rs the chief floor walker, am their director,
their animating spirit or their intellectual
ae,ua courier, as occasion may demand. Our
detectives may he wider awake to thu wiles
aud DISCUSSES Of old birds, the veteran fakirs
than /; hut, Lord love you, for fincsse IN
spottiny the embryo manipulator, Tor delicate
discernlnent between the really absent
minded aud the incorrigible KEEP aud again
between the genuine 'klep and. the proies-
siOual snap l rather latter myself can
give our bobbies odds and capture the belt !"
please explain"
"Ahi Well, then, u klep Is kleptoman-
lac, and = snap IL u thief The genuine
KEPT Is real Victim OF the morbdity called
klcptomania, and wholly un able to control
Its dcplorablc manifestations. Oh, yes,
klcptomania IL q real disease, and no mis-
take. 4 certain wealthy lady afflicted with
II comes here frequently during the fashion
able shopping season, and regularly As clock
work, after she haa made her trining pnr-
chases and picked W her parasol 70 sauntar
back to her carriage, politely conduct her
10 back room, and wait at tho door while
our forewoman assists her 10 disgorge the
articles sho has stolen. She has got sort VI
used to It by this timc-miglt almost be
said to admire e, In fuct--and 10 not ut all
shame faced or embarrassed; though hon
estly think IL any one else but myself would
take her in chxryc---etthsr OF the detectives,
for Instance; une,lucatod fellows, you know
she would be downright oHeuded. There
Is nothing like certain style and tonlness
in everything. We used merely to take menu
oranda Of her pickings, and suyar her to go
home with them, when courteous note, en-
closing bin OF them, to her husband would
result In prompt payment or return OF the
plunder, always with a suitable apology. But
this grew to be troublesome, 50 we resorted
to tho more summary process. We have
other customers, perhaps dozen iL all,
similarly afflicted and susceptible to like
~
Then We have the incorrigible klcps.n
',What Is the distinctoni"
"a broad ono. The genuine klepis either
rich Or lnfluentially connected; the incorrigi-
BILE klep is neither the one nor the other.
The latter Is miserable nuisance, \ thor
oughly obnoxious pest, but, fortunately, sha
Ii swiftly disposed Of Detection, police
men summoned, public search and exposure,
cell In jail, true bin Of larceny nailed to hor
forehead, trial, conviction, sentence, aud the
| ranks OF cvil-doers depleted by one. The
| klcptomania dodge doesn't avail her for a
| cent, and she's ratified or to the roguc's
march, with our firm beating the big drum
| as an Incidental advertisement
ssBut may not the genuine kiep be rs In
corrigiblc as shes And may not the incor-
| rigiblc be as truly diseased aud ~ wholly un-
abla to control the manifestations IS tho
gcnuinef"
The floor walker blinkcd like an intcllcc-
| tual centre bit boring for treasure, but al
| most instantly glowcd as self-sufliciently us
his wont. MY dear sir, you do not under
stand: you are abstruse. You evolve noun
| tains out Of molc-hills," said he, suavcly.
| "You must understand that We lthy or in
| fi,lential women can no more be- an incorigi-
| BILE klep than poor or fricndlcss woman can
| DO genuine KEEP. A supposition to the con-
| trary In either case would be an absurdity.
! Klcptomania, ~ disease and In = business
sense, Is subject to numerous hne-drawn,
| arbitrary distinctions
| "What Is .snap'f'
"A snap 10 shoplifter. There are various
sorts of snaps. There 10 the veteran snap,
wary, aud, but for her face being known,
difficult to detect. Then snaps arc young and
old, pretty and homely. The young ones are
merely in their pupilage, hence clumsy and
readily detected. When very young, and
the establishment IL somewhat soft hearted,
they are like enough dismissed with IN adj.
monition after lecture In private. II the
establishment IL otherwise, the felonious
nedgeling Is less fortunate. Ours Is an
otherwise. We clamp on to thief like 4
thousand Of bricks, aud hammer her TO til.
| cross in a way that makes her bonnet jump
This was said with An asr OF pardonabls
business pride and enthusiasm.
..How DC you distinguish between the ah
sentminded aud the teloniously inclinedr
| inquired the reporter.
Well, that 10 difficult TO describe, nsaid In,
door walker, assuming an impenetrable look
II think ! must do 1t by species Of intui-
ton, a sort OF inner consciousness, or Prom
etheau discernment But just let me tell 80,
this, my friend; 1t would be decid-
edly unfortunate for any shopper TO hetra,
absent mind eaness with regarded 10 til,
property VI this establishment, unless sh,
| were well known as honest, or prepared Il
offset her failing by proving the possession
ola bona fde bank account"
"Ah, yes; otherwise she might risk bein.
clsssed with the incorrigiblesf'
.Exactly.n
TELL me the shopllfters' ways Of operating
and your methods OF detecting them.
.That would necssitate going into yul-
gar details, with which am not wholly CONVEX
SAINT. think shall have 70 turn you owe
to our chief detective for the information
you seek. Here he comes now. Remember
thought and the floor walker hurriedly low
cred his voice. Dan IL neither well educated
nor high bred, and, moreover, he has nc
great liking for me-
Tho detective was q soberly dressed, mid
dlo-aged iron-gray little man, who woul,