Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1884-04-11
THE IDLEIt.
Notes and Gossip Picked Up on the
Street.


The real, historic Irish wit and logic are
shown in u little story told the Idler by a
prominent citizen, the other day. a we'll
known son of Erin was negotiating with a
S lulh Burlington farmer for the pasturage
of COW.
"And how much will yez charge for kap-
ing the COW for the saysOn," imputed our
llibernian.
"Oh, about twelve dollars" was the an-
sHcr.
"rwilvc dollars. TO Ilaies with your
twilve dollars! Ny cow has so, only three
teats ~
Of course this arlumcnt was unanswcra-
bic, and the granger dropped on his price
While the University g!co club was absent
upon its northern concert tour, and just
before one of its entertainments was to be
given, a telegram was handed to ihc leader,
which read simply, "Salve'- with the send
er's name.
The lender scratched his head, and pom
dcred. Then he handed the telegram around
among the boys, and they all read it, and
pOndered
"What sort # salvo do you suppose he
wants, h,ys?'
probably some Canadian make, that they
can't get in Burlington suggested one of
the first blsscs.
The concert began, but all through the
volume Of harmony, from the beginning of
of the programme to the end trailGd that
single discprdant. pprpleXing note
"Sll7c!'
Whea the last encore had died away, and
the sOngslers were at liberty to fit whether
sOeyer they pleased, with one accord they
HE'D HEN to the telegraph office, and the
leader sent the following query whistling
over the wires through the darkness and
space =
"What sort Of save? What do you
mean p
Then they waited and towards midnight
the following reply was received:
"Salvr. Save We! Hail -
con, :" said the leader, with a long drawn
iulonalion OF rrlief-"lhats what he meant.
was it y
"Oh.' cch1d the club--'lhaHs it, Is it ~
"Anyway,' remarked the leader, rs he
folded UP the telegram, "pm glad npbody Is
sick"
One of the bcst-koown politicians in the
Sta'c favored the Idler with Il lot of political
philosopy, the other night. The people, ="
he said, want Edmunds for President, hut
the politicians don't, and it is the politicians
that run these things. Now in this city,
half dozen fellows will run the caucus and
name the delegates to the State convention :;
half a dozen fellows will run the State con-
ventlon aud name the candidates to the Ma
tional convention; and halt a dozen grand
mugwamps will run that convention and
name the Presidential candidate. The pco-
pie don't have anything to say about it. The
machine runs the whole thing, And nine
times out of ten the machine wins the day,
The tenth time it ia licked most horribly.'
Descending from the abstract TO the con.
crete, the Idlcr asked the poitcan (who is a
naughty Democrat rs 10 his Presidential
preferences.
Now, Mr. Idlcr,' said he, "rll tell you
great secret"
Then looking furtivcly around to he sure
that no eavcsdroppcrs were about, he drop
ped his voice to n confidential whisper and
said
"Sh-h-h-h! I'm going to run for the Pre-
Sidency myself! But don't say anything
about it just now"
The readers of the FREE PRESS will there
fore please regard this information as strictly
private aud confidential.