The St. Charles herald. [volume] (Hahnville, La.) 1873-1993, 1884-10-18
Breaking a Balky Horse.

''Not that bay, Johnp He's an awful
baker. Mrs. Flick's little girl, Mary,
told our Frank that that was the reason
they were so late to church last Sab
bath. He offered the horse to Jerry
Brown for his organ, one of Blanks
with twenty-six stops, and"
"Will you stop that clatter, Mrs.
Smith, Don'tye 'spose l never traded
horses? That horse balkr' and there
was pause. Smith was thinking how
Flick had sold him, and was trying to
call up some plan of vengeance and
general destruction of the Flick race,
''Balk, balk! S'pose didn't know it?
Who can't break balkin' horse? Easiest
thing in the world" and Smith looked
very wise. "I'll hitch him up right
away to show you. Like to know what
preachers daughter knows bout a
balkin' horse"
Soon Smith and his wife were in the
farm wagon.
,Glang, now!'' and the horse went
off like an OK team. "Told you so,
Susan. Three hundred dollars of ou1
pappies' wouldn't touch him: Want
Browns organ with one hundred and
twenty-six Blanks in it fer trade, ehP
Ho, hop'
mo, John. Stops, stops, not
Blanks"
''Who said Blanks? / said one hun
dred and twenty-six stops" he replied
with great precision and emphasis.
Fer an organP Organ factory, you
mean. If a woman could tell, could posi-
bly, tell, the difference between horse,
oil
stoppin' fer?" The horse had stopped.
sis he hungry, John. Poor thingI'
''HungryP Very. Hungriest horse
ever produced in the Western hemis-
phere. just dyin' fer food"
The horse was tapped with the lines,
but he continued to stand still.
''Goldang that white livered Flick.
Get ep, | tell you. I'll maui your eter-
nal daylights out. Oh, won't yer get
epP" he asked with whitening scorn,
and he got up by the dashboard and
made terrible lunge with the lines.
The horse made jump forward, and
then stopped again. Smith fell out on
the double trees.
care you hurt, dearP" asked his
wife.
''HurtP" he echoed, as he climbed in,
displaying nose denuded of large
slice of skin. He sat down beside his
wife, painting, but looking in very
piercing manner at her. Hurt
That's only one of them one hundred
and twenty-six stops; only one hundred
and twenty-five more. Hurt, Mrs. Susan
j. Smith, Delightful! Delightful! Solid
enjoyment! Never had anything feel
so good in my born days. Gosh
almighty, that'll be the dogdest lookin
carcass ON my face tomorrow mornin'
tomorrow mornin'. if l LiUe. But
few more stops like that, my dear, dear
Susie, an'-an' you'll be widow, an
yer children fatherless. just you take
turn on them goldarned farmin' i'm
plements out on the wagon tongue.
Besides you lookin' like two twin zebras,
you'll feel pert and spry; gerry pert for
a minister's daughter, am"
"But, John, why don't you put dirt
in his ear? Pa used to when he lived
in Boston, am"
"Your pa did, did hep" he exclaimed,
in bitter irony. "Did he pour in Bos-
ting dirtP So your pa was in the horse
aud real estate business, ehP Fed dirt
in the ear, ehP OF course, of course.
When I'm condemned idiot enough to
shovel dirt hull forenoon in my horses
ears, you'll be a gay widowed daughter
of bean-eating clergyman of Bosting.
You hold these lines. Something's got
to die; die, dye hear, d-i," he spelled,
with awful impressiveness.
He came back from the roadside with
a rail.
MRS. Smith, sag your prayers. Some
things got to sSeAsS<,. You perceive this
dream, that two-hundred-dollar bay
fraud of Mr.. Flick's. There's going to
be CORY contlict. The time is at hand,
the bridegroom waiteth. Soon, my
dear Susan, there'll be sound of rev
elry by night"
At this juncture the rail performed
the Office of a battering ram.
One bump, and the bay kicked the
rail over into an adjoining county.
Then the bay commenced to back. He
backed, and backed, and there seemed
to be imminent danger of the harness
coming off over his head.
"Why, John, DEAR" said his scared
wife, what is the matterP Do you sup
pose you've got the wrong end to the
wagonP Oh, dear!"
''Mrs. S., there is point in every
ones disposition where endurance
ceases to be q virtue" he said in awful
calmness. "I've killed things in my
time. That horse or me has got to die.
If come out on top, then-Flick.
Nothing but the silence of death will do
this time. Amen"
The horse had stopped backing.
Smith got out and looked at the horse
attentively for long time.
MRS. Smith, do you wish to attend
the obsequies of this, this measly an
eternal crawfish of horseP If not, you
will take up your bed an walk. You
will go over this evenin' an break the
news to Mrs. Flick. Tonight in the
cleaning Mr.. Flick will pony over two
hundred dollars, or he and this sweet,
sweet horse will be requiescating in
pieces. "-Teras SJtingS.