The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1884-09-24
SILENT PARTNERS.

n they Tell upon the startled ears o.
her worse half in a way that caused Mr.
Benton to quail a little. for he knew
enough of the temperament of the an
gered woman who spoke to teel that thi'
was no idle threat.
John Benton and his wife Mary hai
been married a quarter of a century a
the time of this violent outbreak, anc
had hitherto been active and talkativt
matrimonial partners. They lived in thu
country upon their OWL little farm, anC
though they had o always held thu
most absolute harmony of opinion, thei1
devotion to each other and their unity
upon all the essential matters of life were
undisputed. 1t was only in the infnites
imal objects of life that they clashed
They had, together, met and surmountec
great obstacles in their common path
but they removed rocks only to stumble
over a pebble.
And finally the contemplate little riv
ulets that had been constantly trickline
for so many years in so many different
ways had seemingly met to form u great
vortex in which they were doomed to be
swallowed up. Those hitherto active
and voluble tongues were about to rus,
in idleness, at least at home. They were
resolved to become henceforth silent
partners.
John Benton accepted the situation
without replying, for what was there to
be said! Had he not been commanded
to refrain forever from speaking to his
wife2
Gallantry forbids us to cast any great
share of the odium of this scene upon
Mrs. Benton. Besides, had not John,
just before the last volcanic eruption of
speech upon the part of his wife, insin-
uated that her ''unruly member was as
long as a fence rail?" Could female flesh
and blood endure such a base simile as
this, when applied to herself9 And had
he not asserted that her words were
legion, and that her tones were thunder9
Should a wife pass over such insulting
personal metaphors as thcse2 Mrs. Ben
ton, either wisely or unwisely, decided
in the negative.
The first night of the self.enforced
silence in the Benton cottage was awk-
ward. The usual curtain lecture was
omitted, and such a death-lik des-
olate stiffness prevailed that sleep
was out of the question. The
morrow brought its tribulations. fol-
lowing one another in close and annoy.
ing succession. Mrs. Benton, finding
the situation too irksome to be borne
without some new excitement to replace
the lost art of speech, determined upon q
revolution of the whole household-the
grand safety valve for the pent-up feel
ings of a housewife, and one of the best
known remedies fer the disease of hypo-
chondria or anger. She went about this
herculean task as though life and death
hung in the balance, or as though upon
its completion depended the casting out
of the dumb devils that had taken up
their abode here.
Many ludicrous blunders were the inev-
liable consequence of this abandonment
of the customary mode of conveying
thoughts; the double orders given to
the groceryman and the butcher, the
duplicate purchases of all sorts of odds
and ends, led to much confusion and
yexation in the Benton household.
One morning John Benton thought he
detected unusual preparations going on
in the culinary department, a grand
oyerhaulting and busting of the best
china set, and sundry other indications
of some unusual event. Mrs. Benton
tried in her dumb-show manner to re-
fresh his memory in regard to an ex-
pected visit of which he had been pre-
viously made aware, but which had
slipped from his somewhat defective
memory. But she could not tell whether
OF not she had succeeded in her efforts
to enlighten him. About noon John
came in, as usual, to din, :, to find a
roomful of city visitors, friends of Mrs.
Benton. Now. John, although not a
vain man, would rather have had some
notification of that event, so that he need
not have appeared in their presence in
his working garments; but as there was
now no help for it, he tried to make the
best of the situation, and greeted the
visitors In rather an awkward fashion.
The latter, no doubt, attributed Mrs.
Benton's silence toward her husband to
modification at his personal appearance.
But, after all, this affair passed without
the exposure SO much dreaded by both
parties.
John Benton had promised his wife,
previous to the unhappy occurrence that
had placed this gulf of silence between
them. money to purchase a new dress for
herself. One day he laid a roll of bills
upon the table, and called her attention
10 it. She nodded assent, and John was
satisfied that her memory was good for
anything that related to her personal
adornment. But what was his surprise
and disgust when she returned from town
and gave him the grocer's rccciDted bill!
One morning, upon Johns return from
the city, he aytonished his wife by bring
ing with him q lad, whom he ushered
into the kitchen with the remark:
"Now, Teddy, this is your home, and
that is yonr mistress, Mrs. Benton, and
whatever she requires of you, you are to
do, of course"
John Benton, in the utter loneliness of
his heart, and fearing lest his unused
tongue should become paralyzed by this
prolonged inactivity, or that he should
lose his voice for want of practice, had,
like Robinson Crusoe, brought home a
little man Friday to talk to, and also to
use as a mouthpiece for himself and wife.
Things o went on with less laundering
aud uncertainty, for Teddy was made the
medium for conveying the thoughts or
wishes alternately from one to the other.
But John monopolized so much of the
boys companionship in his new-found
delight at giving vent to speech, that
Mrs. Benton still led a rather lonely life.
But" though she, "what is sauce for
the goose ought to be sauce for the gan
der, and I will have a girl Friday before
the week is out, in order to strengthen
and improve my vocal powers"
And so she did. Never was there a
more astonished man than was John Ben
ton on the evening that he came chatter
ing with Teddy into the kitchen and
stopped upon the threshold to listen to
the irrepressible food of female conve
sation that was being poured forth
within. Indeed, so intent was Mrs. Ben
ton on unburdening her long-pent-up
feelings that she did not notice the trans
fixed figure of her husband standing
there till her startled ear caught the re-
mark:
"Well, Teddy, this is a surprise party,
isn'tit2"
"Those, Maggie" said Mrs. Benton,
ssare the other half of this family"
The Benton household was no longer
at Hsixes and s~evens" for want of inter-
prefers, between the two heads, but it was
q prolonged Quaker meeting as far as
mingling of the sexes was concerned.
Each of the heads of the house now had
a victim upon which he or she could in
fict intending volubility.
It was about this time that John COM
municated to his wife the mistake in re-
gard to the dress money, and refunded
to her the amount. She in turn. through
her mouth-piece, intimated to him that
his company and services in driving the
fo~;lv boroo uonl5 he accountable tn take