davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
The Formal ..Call, =,

Whatever may betide, men have good
cause to rejoice that they bear no part
in that browning bore Of all bores
known as the formal call. . That Il .
feminine institution. Il is an inven-
ton Of the sex, and the sex groans nn-
der its yoke. Man smokes his Dur
ham in beatific peace. whilst the wife
and daughters pay tribute to the for.
NAL call. He hears the soto voce
prayer that parties win be out, and
that the man can be dispatched with :
card. He quietly notes thesigh Of re-
lief when the exhausted women return
after hours Of social distress. He oh.
serves tho tax Of dress incident to the
affair, the bad temper it invokes, and
the hypocrisy and total absence Of any
equivalent in the way Of pleasure for
all this slavish adherence to custom.
and then dimly realizes the miraculous
felicity of his own escape from such
thraldom, and it maybe takes comfort
in the thought that the whole business
falls totally on those who have made
him pay the piper for countless other
freaks and whims Of fashion and ca
price. The elasticity Of conscience
with which the gentle creatures en-
deayor to mitigate the intliction Of the
formal call BY convenient iibs, furnish
es the masculine monster some anus
ing food for study, and It may be
doubted whether he would budga an
inch to abolish the formal call. It Is
diamond cut diamond; women annoy-
ing women. In such . transaction the
wise man holds aloof and lets the
dainty belligercnts masquerading -
friends manage the hollow and artificial
show as suits themselves. It Is not Of
ten that he has an opportunity Of keep
ing out of q game in which women ar
ray their wits against one another In
stead of against the common tyrant,
man. He is at liberty to be judiciously
silent and hear the fair prattlers dis
cuss each other in style utterly unlike
the fancy pictures Of novelists and
poets, and if he doesn't get some
wholesome emil ghtenment he is hope
lesslV stupid.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
ALL FOR NOTHING.
Why the Doctorwas Disguised, and
what Might have been Done without

Why the DoctofWas Disguised, and
what Might have been Done without
Him.
"Well wife, y said DR.. E-, q no
entered his house, which was situated
In cosy village in central New York.
81 have got back from q long and
dreary ride away down among tho
mountains, and ell to no purpose what.
ever. The messenger said the man
wouldn't live till morning, when the
fact Is he had only On ordinary attack
OF collie. If the simplstons had only
had sense enough to put BENSON'S
CAPCINE POROUS PLASTER on his
stomach he would have been all right
in an hour or two. But some folks
are slow to learn addsd the old ply.
ssician, swallowing the cup Of steaming
tea which his wife had just poured
for him.
DR.. E. was right, yet people do
learn, even though slowly. Tho rap
idly increasing use Of Benson's plast-
or proves this beyond question, and
the good doctors are certain to DO saw
ed much of their needless tell. In oil
diseases capable of being affected by .
plllter BengOn'a Qnta efficiently and ut
once. The genuine have the word
CAPCINE cut in the centre. Price
Is cents. Seabury 4 johnson. Chem.
lists, New York. June 8-A.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

We do not as . rule allow ourselves
to uso our editorial columns % speak
Of any remedy We advertise, but Ne
feel warranted in saying & word for
Hoods SarsapaIilla. earsaparilla has
been known Is q remedical agent for
centuries, and is recognized BY AL
schools Of practice o. q valuable blood
purifier. 1t is put up in forms Of q.
most infinite variety. but Messrs.
Hood + Co. lowell Mass who are
thoroughly reliable pharmacists, have
hit upon 4 remedy Of unusual value.
Certainly they have vouchers Of cures
which We know to be most extTa0rd.
mary. June 8-S4.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
samson's Legs and Locks.

Whom De}ilah clipped OF Ssmson's
locks that mighty athlete at once be-
camo s'as other men," lit could be
proved that the possession Of luxuri.
ant hair would enable mon to tear ON.
On lions jaws, Hiscox & Co. would be
driven wild in the effort to supply
enough Of Parker's Hair Balsam to
meet the demand. Az it is the Bal
sam prevents your hair from falling
out, and restores the original color II
faded or gray. Besides It is great
addition to the toilet table simply a 4
dressing. June 8E8
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

A Louisville, KY, man ran into
Schaefer's drug store at 10 o'clock
on Friday night and asked for court
plaster. When questioned as to his
wounds, he said: ~ live in Bible
alley, and my wife chased me out of
q sscond-story window with q re-
volver. l fell on my face as |
jumped. Be quick, please, for |
expect she is following my trail.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

A Connecticut COW that was sold to
q Baltimore man for 81, 800 q couple Of
years ago, recently yielded, while in.
the care of an expert, who tells the
story under oath, twenty-three quarts
Of milk in twenty-four hours, and the
butter churned from her milk amount
ed in week to twenty pounds
and ten ounces. f7t
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
Danger From Gasoline.

An eastern chemist writes: If gaso-
line is confined in barrel or can so
that the vapor or gas does not escape
into the atmosphere there is no danger.
A lighted match can be applied to
full barrel Of the fluid and no explosion
will take place. q blue iamo being tho
only result. The trouble is, however,
that gasoline vaporizes very rapidly.
and when certain amount of this gas
is mixed with the atmosphere = very
explosive compound is formed. Ihave
demonstrated these facts BY expert
ments. have taken q burner. from an
ordinary brass hand lamp partly filed
with gasoline, and applied match to
it. Then taking q gallon can half full
vt gasolins haYe poured the dui1 ta0
the blazing lamp without producing an
explosion. have then applied
match to the can after the gasoline was
poured out. The gas is heavier than
air, and, Of course it would remain In
the can to the exclusion Of oil air. The
result was that the gas would burn and
not explode. Turning the can bottom
upward and letting some Of the gas es-
cape, its place being taken By air, I
have again applied lighted match
and the can was blown to atoms. There
are many ways in which accidents can
occur. lf barrel or can be open ina
room the gas will escape and mingle
with the atmosphere. II person en-
tiers the room with lamp or candle an
explosion is sure to occur. The recent
accident at Linndale is an illustration
Of the fact. The conductor Of pony
engine crawled under an empty tank
car which had contained gasoline.
Some Of the fluid evidently collected
on the ironwork Of the car, and whom
the gas escaping from it came in con-
tact with the light in the lantern It was.
ignited. The flame ran up the side Of
the tank to the opening, and an explo-
sion occurred. The force Of it. can be-
judged from the noise it made, which
was heard all over the city. The gas
escaping from it is heavier than mir, Is
q have said, and it therefore settles to
the ground Its presence cannot be.
detected, and . person carrying light
will walk into . room filed with it un-.
Willingly. It should never be stored In
cellars, as in that case the gas has no
chance to escape. and an explosive
agent far more dangerous than gum
powder is confined under the building.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
Tho Bread-Winners.' =

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New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
A Paris Adventure.


One OF the most distingutshed physi.
Clans IN faris met with > stattlng %.
venture the other gay. his servant
handed him, at z o'clock In tho even
Ing, . letter signed BY an unknown
person. asking the DOCTORS immediate
attention Tor . relative Of the person
whose signature appeared ct tho bot
tom OF the letter. The relative did not,
however. live in Paris. but n ST Cor
main. at the old pavilion built BY Hem
~ ~. The address given was rather
singular. but the letter contained 600
francs In crisp, now notes OF the Bank
OF France. The case was represented
g urgent; tho patient intended leaving
for the south OF France IN the morning.
Gould tho doctor como at oncel
1t was furthermore suggestsd TO him
that tho train that LETT Paris q mid
night Tor Y GdtahAih-ehs ''thsaeef
train would bo tho best one TO take.
They would expect him at the pavilion;
. room had been prepared, and ne
could return 70 Paris the nrst thing IN
the morning.
The confident tone OF tho letter ana
the snug sum inclosed decided the
doctor. He left home that night In
~ A. AL ~ A. Sp~
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21
One tenement house in New Yorl
shelters 500 families.

A Colorado baFr6 has bssn shipped
across the Atlantic and presented to
the Prince Of Wales. It is matter Of
profound national sorrow that this was
not the first American iackass ever pre-.
sented to his Tallness, tho Prince.
At Omaha, last week, barrel Of
sauer kraut rolled ont Of q wagon and
struck O'Leary II. Oleson. who was
trying to unload it, with such force q
to kill him Instantly, and to flatten him
oaa HE lila dried 40AG4h- Gail, Al
tor many such instances. there .ro
many scientists who maintain that
sauer kraut is conducive to longevity.
AZ an evidence Of the hsalthfulness
Of mountain climate the people Of Den.
yer point to man who came there In
~ without flesh enough to bait trap,
and now he puts sleeves to IN ordinary
feather bed and pulls It over his head
for shirt People in poor health who
wish to communicate with tho writer
in relation to the facts above stated.
are requested to enclose two unlicked
postage stamps to insure reply.
At Tibet, n. T., during the cold snap
In January, one Of the most inhuman
outrages known In the annals Of crime
was perpetrated on young man who
went West IN tho fall, hoping to make
his pile II time.to return IN May and
marry the New York heiress selected
before he went.
While stopping ct the hotel two frol-
icsome young women hired tho porter.
to procure the young mans pantaloons
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

1nHNI NPrssIdsnts Of the o. s. The iars
1UIjN TX )est. haadsomsst bsst book ever
- sold for less than twice ouY price.
The fastest selling book in Amsrica. JmHsnse
pro6ts to the agents. All intelligent people want
II. Anyone can become succsssful agent. Terms
free. HAL1x11 Book CO., Augusts, Maine.
Dscf 1ooI
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

"Maige Passage" a dog, gave the
alarm Of the Breckenridge FIRE. He
ran up stairs, Weakening his owner
just in time to save his Fife.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

An animal was killed last. week
near Rush City which experts say is
cross between wolf and dog.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

In excavating for the waterworks
at Shattuck school, Faribault, vein
Of fine potter's clay was found.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

The Oneota Gold and Silver Min
ing company is great swindls, the
mine having been a ssalted'' one.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-05-21

The St. Nicholas Hotel. the famous
hostelry Of Broadway, after . prosper
Gus careerof thirty -three years IS to
come down and make way for stores.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

consummate politician. The conclusion
OF her letter Is as follows. "While we
sympathize with unhappy ireland and
deprecate the oppression on the one side
and the lawlessness on the other, oH
neutral policy rs nation does not allow
any public expression from our people.
Due consideration will DO given to the
interest of the honest, industrious, home.
loving Germans" TO a reporter Mrs.
Lockwood said her anti monopoly and
civil service policy is funny" and that
her Indian policy is good. sound sense. :"
IL made bid, =" she says, ''for all voters.
Irish. German, temperance. .monopolistie.
anti.monopolisIs, capitalists aud labor.
ers. ! didn't know how to get around
the Germans, because I'm temperance,
and 80 | said due consideration would
be given to the honest. industrious,
homo loving Germans. Mrs. Lock.
woods letter announcing her nomination
says she was select d for the Presidency
because Elizabeth Cady Stanton was "too
old, Susan d. Anthony ''too much of a
spinster.' Mary A. Livermoro 'too OPP
posed TO certain classes, and Lucy Stono
"too narrow" The new candidate wrote
letter to her Western friends, asking
about the Vice. Presidency. aud saying
that was IAN Important and serious ques'
tion
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

THERE is reason TO suppose that Mrs.
Belya A. lockwood of Washington, who
has been nominated for the Presidency
by the w. N. f. r. Party, in San Fran.
cisco assembled, is gifted with sense OF
humor as well as a graceful manner of
wearing biiurcated lower garment. Her
letter Of acceptance possesses the great
merit of breyity, but it is composed in
great part Of jokes: The lady says: 81
am constrained to accept the nomination
SO generously and enthusiastically ten.
dered by the only political party vino
really and truly represent the interests
Of the whole people. North, South.
East and West, because l believe that
with your unanimous and cordial sup.
port and the fairness and justice Of our
cause shall not only be able to carry
the election bu. to guide the ship of
state safely into port" but is good
enough to enlarge upon what she will do
should it be my good fortune to be
elected" Mrs. Lockwood is evidently a
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

AMONG late kilograms is one contain.
ing queer tididgs from town in Georgia.
1t seems that revival was in progress
there while court was holding. The
Grand jury "got to shouting" where
upon the Judge adjourned court for
prayer, himself leading. The result was
that two members OF the Grand jury
were converted. Ii these extraordinary
proceedings brought about more fitting
sense of duty on the part of all con-
cerned than usually charaeterizes per-
sons engaged in administering Justice to
the eastward of the mountains, it must
be admitted that the method employed,
though peculiar, has its advantage over
that adopted in Cincinnati or the prac.
tice of Montana.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

The Republican majority in Maine
has been figured upon, aud is found to
bo but a triile over twenty thousand.
Considering that this is a year when n
President is to bo elected, that with
each succeeding year tho total vote Of
any State is naturally heavier than pre-
viously, that Mr.. Blame himself has
been attending to the canvass for the
past three months, that State pride has
been stimulated, and that the Ropubli.
cans have spent great deal CT money
whilo the Democracy spent none-it
must be adm tied that in Maine tho Re.
pnbiicans have not done as well ss thoy
should have done. AS tho New York
Times puts it: "They have barely
managed to hold their own"
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

The only Senator al iaxnt to this
coast announced 80 far il shat of hies-
sieurs Davis. Cameron of Wisconsin,
and Morgan. These gentlemen are to
inquire into the condition of Indians ia
tho northern part Of the State, as well
as in Southern California, where, ac-
cording to the report OF "H. H., who
last year was givea sinecure commits.
siou. the few remaining aborigines arc
terribly oppressed. "H. H., it will be
remembered, published some absurdly
erroneous paper about this section, APP
parently finding nothing in Southern
California to please her.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

GENERAL JOHN A. LOGAN is in many
ways an extraordinary man and not the
least extraordinary things about him are
his speeches. As they come to us along
the telegraph, wires it Is evident that
the kindly agent of the Associated
Press has paved and polished them into
fair semblance of our English speech.
and for this reason, perhaps, the glaring
misstatements they contain are more
apparent. Logan ACCUSES the Demo.
cratic party of lack of Americanism.
II by this it DO meant that the Demo-
cracy opposes any such emascuatcd
doctrine Of Americanism as that openly
advocated by Mr.. Blaine in his youth;
and, If his official acts when the liberty
Of foroign-born American citizens is at
stake he criterions, still believed in by
him-then General Logan's statement is
true. The Democratic party believes in
that Americanism which is broad
enough to include all American citizens,
to the manner born or naturalized.
And when General Logan hypocritioally
commiseratcs Governor Hendricks for
the assertion that the Democratic party
is the true Americon party, and himself
says that for forty years previous to
1868 the Democratic party had nothing
to protect foreign-born citizens passing
back to their native country, Genersl
Logan either shows lamentable ignor.
ance of the history of his country during
his own life time-whieh is very prob
able-or he is guilty of willhl falsehood
which is equally pscbable. No man
who listened TO Logan speech delivered
at Toledo on Thursday night, nor any
one who reads that speech, will be
deceived by such clap-trap. When
General Logan, in that same <. s.eech,
asserted that the Democratic party
opposed the abolition of slavery, the
assertion was greeted with applause.
This applause must have sprung from
that fine sense of humor 80 charactss-
istic of American audiences, for epeuy
one who listened to the speech we'll
knew that General Logan went ss far
out OF his way as to become slaye-
catcher, and gloried in the e0ngenial
occupation. However, General Logan,
in speaking in opposition to Governor
Hendricks, is doing good service to the
Democratic cause. 1t is not to be
wondered at that in the great States
north OF the Ohio the number of
converts from Repablieanism is increas-
ing.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

Mr.. WILLIAM NANDEgBItr. with q
fathers pride in his SONS, ouee remark ed
in Logah-like way, that th.y knew
enough for "them fellows is Wall street.
Nevertheless thoy were eanght mapping
some time ago, and there is now rife in
that locality painful rumor OF losses on
their part which their father has made
good by actually pinching himself. He
won't be ah!o to contribute much to
Mr.. Blaine's sack.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

THE speech of Hon. Charles Kohler
last night was significant and valuable
from many points of view. Iu the first
place he is n representative German.
In the second, he is highly intelligent
and conscientious man. The fanatir al
programme of the Republican party has
cast him into the Democratic RANKS and
his eountrymen will about uniy, .rsally
follow him
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

HENRY of Navarro, the original knight
OF the white plume, was also u prao'
tical manager of no mean ability. At
the same time his general moral charao-
ter WAS not such as to win much respect
fof him. AS the Philadelphia Record
remarks, possibly some OF tue good men
who march around brandishing their
spears and battle.axes and wearing Whit
plumes might be shocked were they
aware OF the real characteristics Of lin
whose nickname they have little d tc
their own chosen leader.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14
r. r. DEL VALE,
nf Ina Auoelsa
n Grand Display.

The Democratic outpouring last night
was thing TO be proud Of. Entirely
from spontaneous impulse Of patriot
ism our unterrifed cohorts turned out
In great numbers-in numbers which
infinitely surpassed those Of their nd
yersaries--to attest their devotion to
the genuine principles Of popular gov
srnlnent. They wore inspired to this
laudable display by no money wrung
from corporations or absorbed by pari-
attic connection with government
which has already. under Republican
auspices, been wres!ed from the origi-
nal channel in which 1t was put by
the Fathers Of the Republic. Demo
crats last night rallied to the support
Of men whose public lives have been
characterized by remarkable purity and
nm eye single to the public good. The
HERALD has said before that the Demo
cratic party is better organized in Los
Angeles county than in any other por-
ton Of California. 1t reiterates that
opinion, and it will be approved by
the event on the 4th of November
ncxt. In the person of Gen. Clunie the
Democracy last night had the pleasure OF
listening to one of the most magnetic,
persuasive and captivating stump speak
ers in California, aud to a genuine
political preaux cheoaiier. Hon. r. +.
Del Vale, also, confirmed the deserved.
ly high rank which he holds as an
orator. His itness for the great trust
which the people are about to confer
upon him was abundantly confirmed
last night.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

GovnRSoR HEElIRICKs is doing good
Service in Abe cause, and the speeches
he ia making in Ohio are not at all pleas
ant for Republicans to hear or to read.
Containing sound political common sense
they are in marked contrast to those of
General LOGAN.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

AMONG those proasT ated by the heat
III New York is the eminent tragedian,
John Mccullough, whose intellect has
been seriously affected. The many
friendh of Mr.. Mccullough trust that
with the coniing of cooler weather his
health may be restored.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

ACCORDING to q ca 'eful estimate made
by prominent GermGus OF Brooklyn and
Williamsburg, fully ninety per cent of
the German vote of Kings county will
be given for Cleveland and Hendricks.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1884-09-14

THE Germans of San Frar cisco are
wheeling into line and in November
will be found voting for Gle yeland and
Hendricks, and the German brewers of
New York have pnblished the reasons
why they cannOt support Blaine aud Lo.
gan. Thus Democr attic prospects
brighton from day to esa