The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1884-08-23
The man who remains out till twen-
ty-tour O'clock can be said to bo hav-
ing high old time.-Eachdnge.

When think that there are men
who are bold enough to look a woman
in the face, to address her, to shake
her by the hand, and say to her with
out sinking into the ground with ter
ror; "Will you marry me?" l can
not help wondering to what lengths
human audacity will go.-Stah.
Stephen Whitlock, aged eighteen
years, of Lyons, New York, "after eat
ing quart of peanuts, two quarts of
cherries, PITS all, and drinking
several glasses of ice water, died in
great agony" The cause of his death
in unknown, but heart disease is sus-
pected. NorriStoUn Herald.
Departing, l had clipped a curl
That DER ber brow did hang:
She smiling said: You're like gun,
You go off with bang"
At which pressed her lips, and cried;
For punning you've knack;
But now I'm like a fisherman,
go off with q smack"
Wilmington Star.
"Can death part those who have
gauged the depths of each others
soul?" asks Lila N. Cushman, the
poetess. We don't know, Lila, but it
is fact that after we have gagged the
depths of some peoples souls we are
convinced that they ought to be dead.
Detroit Free Press.
"Oh, mamma, if you will believe it,
laughed a pretty girl on her return
from the picnic, "the boat jolted as
we touched the wharf and threw me
right in the lap of ayoung gentleman"
why" was the horrified rejoinder,
what did you do?" "I-I asked him
if he would please excuse my landing
a little prematurely. y."-Eachange.
Housewife-"Why does your milk
look so blue these days, Mr.. Scholk?
1t never has been quite so bad as now"
Milkman etically)-"Well, you
see, mum, our cow has lost ~ calf
She naturally feels rather blue over it,
and ] s'pose it affects the milk more
or less. Cant account for It In any
other way-I use the same pump l
alters have, ,"-Judge.
She dropped her glove
Perhaps In love;
He stopped and picket itup.
She flushed and smiled.
The artless child,
And asked him home 70 sup.
He answered NO"
And turned to go,
And blushed beneath her glance.
And off we went
For when he bent,
He'd badly split his psntsl
--Iife.
my Daughter Paints" is the title of
II new novel; The author, instead of
parading his daughters failing before
the reading public, should have rea-
soned with her at home, and explain
ed how the practice of powdering and
painting Injuries the skin and makes
q young lady look prematurely DID,
Norristown Herald
"What ails you my frind?"
"Hic-choloral"
"Cholera2"
"Cholers, THAI waz smattor-hic--
hic-wiz, me. Bad case-nic-hic
gimme dime for medicinef"
"But where does the hiccups come
in if it's cholera~ 4i #
at amt no-hic-Aisheratic chole-
ra--hic--its Pizburg choler. Hic--
Pizburg cholera good nuff for me?"-
PiHsbstrg Telegraph.
at must De SO awful nice to have. a
newspaper man for a husband" said
young Miss Yearn to her friend Mrs
Second Edition, who has just married
one OF the most opulont of that notori-
ously opulent profession.
"Why?"
"Oh, they always bring home LOT
Of exchanges, and you have no trou-
BILE about your hustle" and she adj
iusted hers with an audible adjust
ment.-ETchdnQe.
az Hope you are sorry that you
took the pants" said an Austin judge
to colored culprit.
II am, boss, for fac"
@You would not do it again, would
you?"
al don't reckon I'll cher gctanuddel
chance at dem ar pant"
81 mean that you are sorry you tool
them?" s.r
II is dat. l was sorry as soon as
tuck 'em. 'spected ter find, at d.
least, eight or ten dollars in dem pants
but dar was muffin in 'em 'ceptin' /
kear ticket and a key, As soon as
run my han in my pocken l felt re
morses, jedge, and Use bin a remorse
ful niggah ebber since Teras Sift