davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
The Model Husband
Burlington Aawkeye.

Burlington Aawkeye.
The DoOdlebugs are going out of
town. They are Fastening for the
train. Mr.. Doodlebug is getting them
off, He is full of business, as be-
comes the head of the family.
"Here, Emeline, take this little
valise and the baby and 60 on. I'll
catch up with you before you get to
the station. Hold on! iii just hook
this hat box on your fingers. There,
now, that'll carry nicely. Got the
baby all right? Tommy you and
Billy and little sister run along with
mother-Great Heavens Emeline,
don't let that child run across the
street alone [; take hold of his hand,
can't you? Tommy, come back and
get this umbrella and bag of lemons.
Emeline Emeline !! You've forgotten
the lunch basket, Billy, run here,
quick, and take this basket to your
mother ! Now, Emeline, do hurry, or
you'll miss the train. Never mind
the rest ofthe things; I'll carry them"
Four minutes after Mrs. Emeline
reaches the station, having wrestled
all the way with baby, three chill
dren and four packages. Her hus.
band arrives, carrying a rattan cane
weighing four ounces. He is so tired
he has to go into the smOking-car and
sleep all the way to the station.
The DoodIebugs? Imaginary peo-
pie? Not by long chalk, my dear
sir. They live right here in Burling-
ton, and every body knows them.
No, don't know that he is considered
much more selfish than some of his
neighbor.. Mrs. DOodlebug thinks he
is model husband. Yes, have heard
some of his neighbOrs say she is fool,
but she isn't, | think. She is a wom-
an, and consequently loves her hus-
band too well to club him with a
coupling pin every once in a while for
his own COOL. She would carry
more things for him if she had more
arms.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
Waking Ones Self at Will.

FROM the American Architect.
An old problem of psychologists
has been revived by a letter to La
Nature, written by French business
man who mentions that for years he
has been in the habit of waking him.
self at any hour in the morning that
he wished, simply by impressing upon
his mind before going to sleep the fact
that he must awake at that hour, and
saying further that he seldom varies
FIVE minutes from the moment which
he had assigned himself. We have a
very distinct recollection of many
instances in which we have ourselves
tried the experiment with success, and
at one time when it was necessary for
a considerable period for us to wake
on certain days of the week at a very
early hour, to take the first train to
the place where our services were then
needed, We had an opportunity of
studying the circumstances under
which this peculiar species of self-con-
troll is most easily exercised.
During this period we found no
difficulty in waking regularly within
about five minutes of the time neces-
sary to enable us to. reach the train
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
coo & sos WYaldOtte 81.

anteed or money refunded Charges low o.
2,OtO cases cured-experence Is important All me-
icines finished ready for use-nO running to drug
stores. Patients treated at distance by letter and
express; medicines sent everywhere, free from gaze
or breakage. No injurious medicines used. No de-
tentiOn from business State your and send for
terms Consultation free and confidential person.
ally by letter BOOK for both sexes-ilustrated
and circulars OF other things. sent sealed in plain
envelope, for two &c stamps. u MY Free Museum
NtnOw Open-see description II above book
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
TRUSTEES SALE

Whereas, Hiram Kroft and Alkaline L., his wife
by their certain Deed of Trust dated the 10th day
of March, 1885, and recorded in the Recorders Of
fee of Pettis County, af Deed Book 25 page esq.,
conveyed to the undersigned Trustee all their
right title interest and estate in and to the fol-
lowing described Real Estate, situated in the
County Of Pettis, State of Missouri, VIE: Begin
ming at point, two hundred and eighty-five (2S5)
feet north of the south east corner, of the south
east quarter, OF the northeast quarter of section
nine, Coy in township, forty-ive, (45) of range
twenty one (2l), thence running north two hun.
dred and seventy, 270) feet, thence west three
hundred. (3OO) feet, thence south two hundred and
seventy, (270l feet, thence east three hundred
5000 feet to the place of beginning. Which said
conveyance was made IN trust TO secure the pay
ment of six certain promissory notes in said
Deed described, and whereas, one of said notes has
become due, and is unpaid, now therefore in &C.
cOrdance with the provisions of said Deed of
Trust, and at the request of the legal holder of
said note, shall proceed to sell the above escrib.
ed Real Estate at the court house door, in the
county of Pettis, State aforesaid, to The highest
bidder for cash, public auction,
ON WEDNESDAY, THE THIRD DAY or DE-
GENDER 1884,
between the hours of nine the forenoon and va
in the afternoon of that day, satisfy said note
together with the cost and expense Of executing
this trust
o. A. CRANDALI,, Trustee.
Dated this llth day of November 1854. lI-1l-w4t.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
The Bad Boy.
Peck's Sun.


"Well, well. don't look so condemn.
ed solemn" said the groceryman to the
bad boy, as he came in and leaned
against the show case, put his hands
in his pockets, and looked down at the
floor wit n his eyes "sos. Whats
the matter of you? What are you
thinking of?'
81 was just thinking and wonder
ing if it was right for parents to en-
courage boys by telling 'em of the
glorious future that is before any
American boy, the prospect that he
may one day be president of the
United States. l think it would be
better to encourage boys by pointing
out to them how, by conducting them
selves right, they can escape the fate
of running for president. What glory
:: : there in being president? If
president amounts to anything he gets
shot, and if a decent man runs for
president he is abused worse than a
pick-pocket. Washington was all
right enough, because his opponents
never found out any of his cussedness
and il they had, dassent tell, for fear
he would take a shot gun and blow
'em full of buckshot. But the presi-
dents since L can remember, have
been pretty tough, or got murdered.
No, sir, when pa tells me to bra up
and be a man, and some day / may
be president, / say, Pa, I amt 60
ing to be that kind of man. Poll.
itics are demoralizing the boys worse
than anything. Some of us boys don't
know whether we are democrats or
republicans, because both parties have
hired us to carry torches. Say, what
is the best thing to cure prohibition
lists headache ?"
"Cure prohibitionist's headache ?"
asked the groceryman in establishment.
"What does a prohibitionist want
with a headache? Who has got
one?"
"Oh Pa. L suppose he had the
worst headache in this country, and |
ali from prohibition. Pa has belonged |
to both parties, during the campaign,
and up to election he was pretty So
Der, for him, but all last week, when
Blaine was elected one day and CIeve-
land was elected the next day, it was
too much for Pa, as he had to change
parties about twice day, and he got |
so full that he suffered. He shouted |
until he got hoarse, and came home
one night with a rooster tied by one
leg, and he tied it to the bed post.
Pa was feeling funny, and when ma
asked him what he brought home he
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
ORDER OF PUBLICATION.

STATE prE; of G MISSOURI }ss.
In the Circuit Court January term A. d. 1885 Nell
lie Vsnzandt William III. Vanzandt, petition
for divorce.
Now, at this day comes Nellie Vanzandt, the
plaintiff IN the above entitled cause, before the
dersigned clerk Of the circuit eOnrt of Pettis
county, in vacation, and hss her petition and aft
davit stating, among other things, that the above
named defendant, William II. VanZandt, is non.
resident of this state. IL is thereupOn ordered
by the clerk aforesaid in vacation that publication
be made notifying him that action has been
com enced against him, by petition, in the cir
cult court Of Pettls county, in the state of Mis-
souri,, for divorce and alimOny, on account of de-
seruon and ndignities offered, and that unless he
be and appear az the next term of said court to
be holden at the court house in Sedala within the
county Of Pettis, on the 6fth day of January, A.
ID. 1885, and on or before the sixth day
thereof, and answer said petition, or
the petition will be taken as confessed by him
and judgment be rendered In accordance with said
petition. IL is further ordered that copy hereof
be published in the Weekly Bazoo, q paper pub
lished 10 said county of Pettis for four weeks
successfully, the last insertion To be at least four
weeks before the commencement of the next term
of said court
A true copy. Attest:
B. II. INGRAM, Circuit Clerk,
November 10th, 1884.
E. E Clark, attorney for plaintiff. 11-l1w4t
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02

Anecdots OF Joseph Jefferson and
Chicago Lawyer.

A correspondent of the Detroit
Times, writing from this city, says
"In Jefferson's presence one begins to
like everybody in the "orld. He isn't
telling you what he thinks of his
plays; he has no scrap book literature
to unload upon you. He doesn't show
you the costly presents which the
titular dignitaries of the old world
brought to him "when / was in Lon
don" While he is in love with his
business, he wants to leave it where
he leaves the old gun and trappings
which make up Rip. But there ia
one subject which he will dwell upon
by the hour. 1t is Mary Jefferson.
She is his wife and he is in love with
her. She comes with him to the play
and between the acts they sit chatting,
when he is not changing, like two
rustic lovers. They 60 away from
the play together and perhaps have a
luncheon-most of these professionals
do.
"Come and take dinner with me TO-
morrow" said a prominent lawyer
to Jefferson in my hearing few days
ago.
Cant do" replied the undis-
guised vagabond of Falling water.
"Why not 2" asked the lawyer,
going on to mention the number of
distinguished people who would be
there.
81 have another engagement"
pleaded the actor.
"Break it for me-" interceded the
expectant host.
"Not for the world" was the cyni-
cal answer.
"Who is it that claims you'll" asked
the lawyer, somewhat out of plumb.
"Mary," was the reply. Not as
man would say it whose 'tother part
was a vixen. Not as one would put
it who wished he could get away. He
said it proudly and like a man,
and in such gallant way that the
lawyer bowed and replied, 81 beg
your pardon but [, of course, ex-
pected your wife to accompany you.
/ included her in the invitation-you
know, you are one. Will you say to
me now that you will come and be my
guest?"
eff Mary comes with me-" was the
answer. A lady who was present at
the time punched me on the arm until
the blood stopped in its channels, and
when / showed her that such pro-
cedure was not pleasant. she answered:
al couldn't help it. When Jefferson
said that about his wife [ wanted to
hug him, and as / couldn't do it /
pinched you. Wasn't it just delight
full to hear him say that 7"
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
Theatrical "Dont's"


Don't-be "theater party" in its
ordinary form, like tbeater parties
who take possession of places of
amusement for social purposes, look
ing at the play only at intervals when
conversation and interchange of re-
partee has become exhausted. Let
b ,xes alone be chosen by these intru-
ders, or let strict surveillance of ush-
er. preserve quiet by keeping them up
to the usual standard of propriety.
Ushers should be instructed TO have a
wa'chful eve to detect groups of these
social beings, and a bold tongue TO
reprove even the peitiest among them,
should she be forgetful of those about
her.
Don't keep line of buyers wait
ing while you hunt from pocket to
pocket for the requisite money, or
linger unnecessarily at the window.
Don't--come in late. A reserved
seat is no excuse for robbing g whole
row of attentive listeners of perhaps
one of he brightest bOnmOts or gay
est songs of the evening. Many a
keynote to whole play has been lest
by such disturbance.
Don't-and this is for the ladies'
wear faring hat with profuse trim
mings, even though SNOWY and be-
coming. Fashion has made permissa-
bic even for dressy occasions the little
Langtry or Alsatian hat, and these
Can be of such rich material and so
becoming that there is no further
excuse for the more dashing styles,
which are sometimes large enough to |
obstruct half the stage from the view
of the person sitting behind the
wearer.
Don't--crowd the person sitting
next you by taking any sideways
position, extra elbow room, or In any
other way encrOachiDg on the space
allotted to him.
Don't--use strong perfumes at the
theater OF any other place where you
are seated near strangers. Pure air
in theaters is hard enOug ID to obtain.
and if enc has to endure the objec-
perfume without sufficient
pure air to brace against Its effects, a
whole evenings enjoyment may thus
be turned into a gentle form of ILL
ness. "No oder at all is the best
odor," and harder far to obtain than
those of "Lubin."
Don't-put your feet upon the seat
In front of you, or in any way move
Dr. jostle any seat but the one you
have paid for.
Don't-Make audible criticisms
upon the plays, as you may thus
-udely disturb some delightful illu
,ions in which your neighbor is in
lulging. 1t is a fine art to be a good
critic and few are really proficient.
Save your ideas on the play for those
who you know will value your opin-
Ons of its merits.
Don't-leave your seat for the next
person to either stumble over or turn
upward for you. Just a simple
and it is put in its place
and the aisle clear. Such a marked
in theater seats ought to
be a temptation to everyone to take
advantage of it.
Don t--loiter in the doorway or
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
STRAY NOTICE

Taken up by J. w. Cole and posted before r. ID.
Handbook, justice of the peace in Prairie tswnship
Of Pettis county, on the 18th day of November, in
the year 1884, the following described property
one dark brown mare about fourteen hands high,
heavy set, supposed to be seven or eight years old
Texas brand on left hip, small white spot on FORE
head, appraised at $50; also, one brown black
mare mule wftha mealy nose, fifteen hands high,
supposed 70 be three or four years old and APP
praised at SIS.
Appraised BY I'D. McGEHEE,
z. HAIGHT,
ll-l3WStS K. A. HAIGHT,
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02

aisle in leaving; this might seem
almost superhouous caution had not
personal experience shown 1t to be
otherwise.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02

Are your Kidneys disordered2
Kidney Wort brought me from my grave, as
were, after had been given up by 10 best doctors IL
Detroit" N. w. Deyeraux, Mechanic, Ionia, Mich
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
s TANDARD BIOGRAPHIES
JUST READY.

JUST READY.
BLAINE and LOGAN-712 Royal octave pages;
67 full page Illustrations.
TILDEN, CLEVELAND and HENDRICKS-T4
Royal octave pages, 80 fuil-page Illustrations,
Best terms ever offered to agents Outfit Free.
and all Freight Pai1. Address
II. 8. GOODSPEED d co,
I0-7-v1y. New York or Chicago.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1884-12-02
DIR. w HIT TIER,

Treats all forms of Veneral Diseases, Semi
nsl Emissions and Sexual Debility, witt
unparalleled 5access. No matter who failed
call or write '-amphlet or consultation kres
Can refer to the medical profession ia nj
parts Of the County,
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1884-11-13

There is no disputing the fact that mex
TO thorough draining the great lack il
American farming is . proper scensm!
and application Of manures and fertilizers
No farmer should buy any fertilizers unit
be saves and applies his manurss. From
extensive observation We conclude thai
mot one farmer in . hundred makes The
most OF bis manures The urine OF AMI
mails is a. valuable A. their dung and moi
one farmer in one hundred saves il. Such
waste Of vslusbls food tor crops should
not be allowed. The barnyard must
always lie the farmers main source ofsup.
ply for maDures; aud tue almost universal
mistake ia tue waste Of urine. the liquid
manure which is usually allowed 10 20 on,
and more than this. allowed 10 carry away
with il the many elements Of fertility from
the solid mature, cannot he too thorough.
" condemned. We protest, in the name
81 the hungry lands, agsiust this waste
81 vegetable food Of the very best
quality.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1884-11-13
This Year, Cors Crop.

Good authorities say that the prsssnt
corn crsp Of the country may be safely
estimated At 1900. OO0. 600 bushels. and
that very large percentage of it will
grade much above the average. Taking the
oouatry together, it can hardly fall below
IS cents per bushel. And this means five
hundred million dollars drawn from the
soil in this one crop, and added to the
resources Of the country. The Prairie
Farmer makes some interesting calculs-
tions in regard 10 this two thousand mil.
lion bushels Of corn. Itsays: 1T is equal
to nearly ten bushels. or 2G0 pounds. for
every man, woman aud child in the entire
United States and Territories, Or over one
and half pounds for each every day IN
the year. So. ifevery other cereal has been
swept away. this corn crop alone would
sustain the life Of the nation full year.
At SO pounds to the bushel, this COIN
would make 6ity-six million wagon loads
OF ton each. Stretch these wagons out
in line. allowing emily 30 feet for each
team and vehicle including the small
space between the teams carrying the corn
crop Of this year would form line Of $40,
3O3 miles. or more than 81 times around
the world. Loaded on railway freight
cars. with 500 bushels. or $4,000 pounds,
to the car, there are in this years corn
crop four million carloads. At forty feet
TO each car it would make up freight
train over 10000 miles long, or about
thirty-two continuous freight trains,
each stretching from Chicago to New
York.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1884-11-13

There 10 30 medium through Which ais.
ease % often attacks the sy,sm - BY Cos
siipsiioa. ADD their Is no other III acsh Il
heir 10 more apt 10 be neglected. irsm The
isei material ipeoavenienoe may not b.
immediately ielt from irregular action 81
the bosels When there is not regular
seiion Ne fetsntioS Of dccsyed and efys,s
matter. si,h its poisonous gases. soon poi.
seas the slioIe s!siem by being absorbed
into Il. esnsing piles. 6stula Lssasshs.
impara blood aud masy other serious a..
fictitious BURDoCk BLOOD BIrTERS
alll Immediately relieve. and one bottle
positively cure o. relieve any case Of Con.
stipation.
"Mss troubled for year with torpid
liver sud indigestion. aud alter trying
EVA, thing imaginable used BURDOCK
BLOOD BirrERS. The Arst bottle 70.
v'red me and the second cured me entire
y ri ). WILLIAMSON. Rochester, N. Y.
2sswcow
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1884-11-13
Manchester Hotel
And Music Hall,

situated On he cus ~ : Main sni unien streets
opp sits The Eqaisoa H8n.@, !. offered fal ysle.
Tbs ~ 10 f61 f.es roHi md 2eo fei deep
Tbs Lsilssss coaI sin aflS -oIe s.re ing r. oms,
pArioss, dsuhx room, Kitchen. isnndry. etc..
mpiste. ard nrtishsd fsaay &. run - botA
isrcsptine diniug room rfsck-sy. hnsp, .ic.t
Ice houss spd 70 ming uAlsr ON the premises.
The rooms have here.oiors been used an con.
bee on si.h the quinoI .nse. snd are thor
enghiy wsli furnsshed aud have best so.a
syringe. hair mattresses etc.
There 70 drug store poet fec. and efce Of
NgncAeSss Joesaef. Ia tho north end ~ the
sus dag. AstuL y NAL received ffcm these
wssnts. $40
The Marie Hall audience room IA. stage AID
scensf,. capacity. 500: r~Giai as per night
small dsprss hal! "a semeni. feassl o. per
sAght yonr very GIe bowling sIss,s 10 base
mest. vsil pstronis~5 DUNG The svmner
The are Alec tso isrss stables spds Coach.
Aas's Hal. ihsi sall be soid siih the oyery,
a DESIRED. Alec ots 10 eve acres ~ had.
ibis 10 an sppori aHliy te ~ ebsse : ssinsbls
spi Paying rr6pstts at q rsAs8albis price. A
go 4 msa who cen 10y SIC 90 essh rsn bare 30
.hs ls.e aesssrd CO the bssspe~. Al "a pst neas.
4ahfest
sos farther psrfiesis's. address
". II. oEst~. sfssasog Hal,
Jscks0AssLLs. fLA
AFTER Nsy ist. Kgsa~oz Hs-~.
u hlscsErrrx. yrxxoss.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1884-11-13

Tie farmer skould select his Own ssed
eVfn himself, and not trust to hired help,
BY rigid course Of selection. with Ger.
tain poists ia view. il il easy to make
visible gains on the quality and yield Of
sss's crops With pAssiog years. The best
time 10 make selections Of seed ears il
whils the corn il standing, but il il VA
then neglected. il may still be we'll done
d huskiug time. Most men would agree
that the main points to be observed are
EARLIEST Of maturity, number and fizs Of
ears. the Hlliug out Of the grain on the
cob, ths size Of the stalk and amount Of
Leaf Leave the husks on the selectsd
ears, TO serve for brsiding them iogsthsr
and hanging them up TO dry. They
shosld W hung 10 dry loft, or the peak
OF corr crib ont Of the wsy Of rats and
mice 10 dry. BY suspendiDg the braided
ears from stretched wires these pests.
vhsrs present will be prevented from
reaching them.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1884-11-13
DO YOU KNOW
THAT
MRILLARD'S CLIMAX

With Red Tin Tag 10 the besty IL the purcst;
ID never adnlterated with glucose, barytcs, mo.
iAsses, or any deleterious Ingredients, AZ IL the
casc with many otber tobaccos
LORILLAnD's ROAG LEAr FINE
GUT TOUtCCu
10 also made Of the inject stock, and for aro.
matte chewing quality IL second 70 ntne
LuWILLARD's NAVY CLiPPSN0s
take first rank ss . solid durable smoking
tobacco wherever introduced.
LOWbLLANO's FAMOUS sNurFa
have been used for over i2i yesrs, aud are sold
10 lsfesr extent than any others.