The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1884-12-24

ninety. but we told him 10 get up the one hun
dred and hfty somehow; we must beat the
tailed as mourners and rehearsed them on weep
ing. At first they didn't do very well But ne
got at 'em. "You must remember" said he that
the deceased was dear comrade Of yoursl Weep,
you suckers, Teepp' He got EN- at 1t at last so
their grief was pitiful to see, And he rehesrsed
the sle eu, club 100 and in Less than
made for a funeral that would knock the
one the Guards gave their man higher
Office congratulating ourselves on the way we
were geing to get away with the Guards. and
how mad they'd be about il, when in rushed the
ORDERLY and whispered TO the Colonel. The Col
onel turned Iale and rushed from the room. We
looked at es Gu other fearing some impending Ca
lsmity. Before We could say am more than
said, 1.-THE DEVILS TO pay The corpse has come to
life" CONSERVATION seized upon Us, and
IL was qm followed BIZ horror lotto noa as ,n the
trance caused by the blow Of the derrick) came
rushing in. As the widow was of a very econom-
ieal turn of mind, she had saved the most of the
stock OF clothes OF the remains, TO be traded 10
Italian peddlers for plaster images, and the only
garments in which he had been laid out to be
buried were false shirt front, . collar and
dress coat His appearance was something weir
and ghastly, and several of us indicated dispos
ton to get out of the window. But We were 500 a
scared than we were. His narrow escsp
from being buried alive had com
pletely unnerved him. He called fran
we Gained down q bit, the horror Of our situation
dswned upon US. We had made all our prepare.
back on us. The Colonel realized our predica-
ment and promptly undertook 70 argue il with
the remains. 1--WE have engaged the carriages "
said he 1--WE have hired the bands, we have decor
ated the hail. the Clergyman has written ms ser
mon and we have invited the people. IL you
back out now. IL places us in a very embarrassing
Couldn't see it for long time, and positively de
clined to get back into the coffin and let the fu-
neral proceed. But Colonel Barring was an el0-
quent man, and at last offer of Sl20 touched
ChadbourDe's heart. That, and an agreement that
he was merely TO be placed in the big town tomb,
and should be let out and allowed 10 escape after
the folks got away, fetched him, and zen minutes
before it was time to open the doors and admit
The guests we got him into the coffin Colonel
BaTng had lent the remains pair OF trousers, by
the way). Then we thought we were all right
and when the crowd got quietly seated we pro
Greens, conducted 1t, and tell you the eere-
monies were impressive, The men detailed as
mourneS DID themselves proud. They seemed
that they could be heard over at the Guards
Armofy. But while everything was working so
well, the liquor the remains had swallowed be-
gan 10 Work. 1t was just our drafted luckl He
began TO get restless and twist in the coffin Chap
lain 1OOmbs noticed 1t, and felt terribly embar-
raised, but he went on WITH his glowing tribute
to the dead. meanwhile whispering 20 the remains
to keep still. But the blamed fool kept
growing drunken and more restless.
he wanted to rise up, and the Chap
ordeal for the Chaplain to preach the funeral ora
ton and hold the corpse IN the coffin at the same
time. But he made heroic effort-0ne for which
shall always honor him. He was bewailing the
loss OF q dear comysde. and throwing his whole
weight the hand that rested on the cOrpses face
when aceide ntally his thumb got in the corpse S
mouth, and the drunken chump bit il to the bone.
That was too much for human endurance. The
Chaplain ihowled and jumped, and the corpse
sat up. Then there was q scare. Women
tainted and men got wild. For my part saw our
funeral was ruined after all our trouble, and /
was awful mad. / had paid S65 for that corpse
and meant to get my moneys worth, so / went
for him, and he was pretty near a corpse In dead
earnest when got through kicking him round
the room. OF course, that settled the funeral
We tried to save il from utter failure by turning
il into ball, but it didn't work.
People said IL was shockingly
disgrsceful affair, and il made a
terrible scandal. Bat we could have stood all
that 1t was the guying we got from the Guards
that broke up. We got it hard that it finally
resulted in the disbandment of the Green's and
I've never joined military company since.
don't believe in EN-. The only streak OF luck we
had was that our uniforms were green, and we
were bic to sell them to the Fenians when they
got up raid on Canada.