The Press., 1884-01-24
4 POINT OF ETIQUETTE.
.sIs this an editor ?''

ssIs this an editor ??
 - The horse reporter looked up from a little idyl on the life and c areer of Rysdyks Hambletonian into which he had been put ting the best efforts of his surging braia, and baheld a rather short young man who was peering in an affable but somewhat IT, resolute manner over very high collar, and on whose upper lip was delicate tracery which looked as If 1t might have been affected with some No. 2 molasses, and at which the young man was making furtive grasps with the thumb aud fore finger of his right hand, evidently under the impression that he had moustache and desired to pull 1t.
 CT want to see an editor" said the youug man. in voice that sounded like the best efforts of a cricket, ''about 8 so- cial topic-I want to see the social topic editor
 ssWhat sort of a social topic is it that's worrying you ?n inquirtd the biographies of S.. Julien. stThere are a good mauy social topics. Has somebody ia your sa- cial circle been holding three aces with criminal freaueacy, or has the green-eyed monster invaded your once happy fiat be- cause your wife goes to the matinee ?"
 .,Oh, Its nothing like that" said thv, young man. II promised papa that I'd never play poker, and I'm not married that is, not yet.
 "Well, the gentle sex is having one lucky winter anyhow, said the horse re, porter, surveying the visitor carefully. s'f you'll quit grabbing for that supposi- titious muetache and tell me what alls you perhaps I can settle the point. Whats the social topic you are distressed about?
 "Well, you see," said the young man, sE.-rI,oy, T rr,k ;,+a fba 1o0oc-,5
 'sInto the what ?"
 Unto the laces-the lace department in our store. you know-all the other fellows there were real jealous of me because had been out more in society than tht y had. belong to three clubs on the west side, and we have hops, and assemblies, and things every week so I'm really quite in the swim, you know. We'll, they were awfully jealous, you know-Just as l said and they talked real mean. told Chol- ly about it-Cholly's my chum, you know -and he said to never mind them, but keep going right into society; and he lent me his mauve pants for an awfully swell reception one night last week. Cholly and I are awful chums, and I'm going to give him a book-mark on his birthday. That will be nice, won't it ?"
 "Yes," said the horse reporter, "a book mark is valuable aid to any young maE who is hustling around to get living With strong arm, pure heart, and nc book-mark fortune is within the reach oi all. But what's the question that's worry ing you ?" ,,s....., uon .ho other day a lot of us were talking about young ladies. and I said that very few young men knew what real etiquette was, and | gave an awfully severe look at one fellow who has been terribly jealous of me since young lady who came to the store the other day smiled right over in the di- rection where I was standing, and never even looked at him. And then some one said it was proper to call on young lady and ask her to accompany you to tfe theater that evening. said that would be wrong-that the correct way was to write the lady 8 note asking the pleasure et her company. We had terrible discussion about it, and finally agreed to leave It to fine social topics editor of the Tribune. Now. supposilg you were young lady, and I were to call at your papas house ana ask you to go to the theater with me that evening, what would you do?"
 Suppose Twas young lady?' sald the horse reporter.
 s'Yes."
 "And you were to call and ask me to go to the theater with you?"
 'sYes.''
 'What would do?'
 "Yes."
 "Well, if somebody had mislaid the gun I suppose should have to content myself with club. ."- Chicago Tribune.