The Osceola times., 1884-12-13

is described to be, except l was IN fuil
possession of my senses. Spiders, skele-
tons and shapes of grizzly horror, with
claws and grinniDg fangs, flashed before
my eyes as l lay and tried to sleep.
Again, there were visions of the stupen-
dous, the terrible. Giant trees, thou
sand feet high, with waving, wing-like
branches, shot up and disappeared.
AWFUL COLUMNS OF DARKNESS.
Blacker heights in the midst of dim
darkness wavered before my sight and
were gone. When l closed my eyes,
strange circles and spots and spaces of
light noated before them. Circles of
dusky gold suddenly appeared upon a
field of holy, shining violet light. 1t was
like the violet tint that sometimes glints
for moment across the electric light
but it was infinitely more beautiful. One
circle of dusky gold, narrowed to a spot
of white light upon the narrow field, and
disappeared, to be followed by another
floating in its place. Sometimes the
circles were a vivid, exquisite green.
There were stranger things than this
Into the violet field and the circles of
dusky gold there were sometimes pro-
jected human faces and figures. They
came in flashing tableaux and disap-
peared in less time than could be meas
ured, yet they were perfect. | saw their
dress, the color of their eyes, and could
! have identified them anywhere. They
were common place enough looking,
! mostly, but at that time there was no
one among them whom had ever seen
before. The visions were often an actu-
al optical impression, such as is often
left upon the retina when one gazes at
the window or bright object and then
suddenly closes the eyes. | watched
| them fade away in the sane manner.
| No; these impressions were not imagin-
alton, they were not dreams. ! exam
ined them curiously. | anatomized
them as coolly as do this minute.
TERRIBLE NIGHTMARES.
Sometimes sleep visited me for twenty
minutes or halfan hour; then nightmare
dreams would come, marvellous in their
texture. One feature more constant than
any other was an unearthly sensation,
as though, somehow, ! was bursting
away and out of the body, roaming free
through space. An inward impulse set
my arms moving in ryhthmic motion,
and thus l passed through air, and set
myself down at will wherever upon TIE
earth / chose. On awakening there
| hp Of t,t e..
about my arms and chest, as though in
very truth had made the super. earthly
journeys had dreamed of.
If had been able to put down on pa.
per the thoughts and fancies that thronp.
ed my brain in those days / could have
written as never did before or since
Every sense except eyesight was sharp
ened and intensified TO supernatural
keenness. l could bear at great dis.
tance; ordinary sounds seemed at times
cannon-loud. / caught ideas and sug-
gestions with preteInatural quickness
But ] could not write a line, could
not steady my attention long enough to
read a column of newspaper dispatches
The serial had been finished some time
before this-finished in the midst of an
agony which will be a horror to me al
though | live thousand years. Ifsome
of the characters came to a violent end
it was only the tantest ofretlex thoughts
that swelled in my soul.
| TALK WAS A TORTURE.
dreaded the sight of human beings.
1t bored me unspeakably to talk or be
talked to. At my best / always hated
CAB. During those months talks was a
torture to me. Many time | walked
squares out Of my way to avoid being
spoken TO by some one knew. shrink
from meeting strangers to this day. All
this time good friends, kind friends, were
| saying to me.
"You need cheerful company. WeIl
come up to your room. You shut your-
self off alone too much"
Great heavens
used to walk Till was ready to drop
with fatigue, hoping to tire myself out
and bring forgetfulness. A story had
read in childhood haunted my recollect.
ion. 1t was of a Chinese merchant who
had murdered his young bride. For
punishment he had been sentenced to
remain without sleep till he died. He
sat in chair, surrounded by guard
armed with sharp lances. Ifhe showed
symptoms of nodding off, these progged
him with their lances and pierced his
skin. He lived nineteen days. it was
said, and died in raving torment II
was all as clear as the light of day t.
me.
If could have remained awake till
died, like the Chlnaman, well and good.
Death would have been welcome: de nth
at any would have been glad release.
But, as it was, slept by fits aud starts
perhaps two hours out Of the twenty
four, and that kept me alive, although
certainly | endured ali the torture to
which the Chinaman was subjected.
To me t5e one good, the unattainable.
WAS rest and oblivion. O. for one nights
sound Sleep A voice in my soul. like
the tick of a clock, tolled without cess
ing, the words: Heaven is an eternal
sleep heaven-is-an-ete
l suffered frightful neuralgic pains in
my head. There were flashes of indes-
cribable exaltation of spirit, followed by
hours and days Of depression, enough to
drive one 10
SUICIDE.
In truth that was the secret dread on
my mind day and night. feared lest
in spite of all my will power | should
be driven to selfdestruction at last
Better people than /, famous men. had
been under the same circumstances.
The thought entered into all my move
ments. Hours were spent in walking
the Chesapeake sands. gazed out up
on the splendid. tumbIing, lionlike
breakers, and loneed to be at rest. If
one more beautiful, more majestic and
sbi nj NO than fba M a, c,,rla / o,,.