New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1884-07-30

A Nevada lady took an unfair advan-
tage of her husbands indulgence in q
bath to elope with another man, and
the bcreft one expressed conviction
that she had been waiting for an OPP
portunity for years.
Another tomb has been uncovered in
Egypt; it contains 5000 mummies.
Hitherto all these ancient worthless
have kept mum, and even now some
body else has to speak for them. Dry
Goods Bulletin.
A society has been formed at Hart
ford Conn.,, to provide harmless amuse-
ments for young men. The ravages OF
bicycling and baseball are evidently
beginning to be felt in that community.
Darlington Free Press.
where Is My Boy Tonight" is the
title of late song. This is difficult
conundrum to answer; but a little later
in the season, when the weather is a
little more settled, he will probably be
found assisting some young girl to ruin
the hinges of a garden gate. Somer-
ville Journal.
MIL Ws1AA 40 Ac1AuAnS " I1uo Iue
bicycle. He will soon. give an exhibit
ton of innocence abroad. -L0,UeN Citi.
gen. We hear he is going on tour
with his "White Elephant, with .'Tom
Sawyer to drive the beast. They ex.
pect to have splendid time Rough.
ing it. Brooklyn Times.
.'Oh, Mr.. Solo," remarked gush.
ing young lady to rather bashful
vocalist, "why don't you go into soci.
ETY. more and let us lionize youP''
'.My dear Miss G" replied the singer.
''there was but one man who was not
spoiled lionizing.'' '.And who was
that, prayP'' ''Daniel. "-Ou city Der
rick.
''Anything of Importance happened
while you've been gone?' said the
Vermont man to his neighbor just
back from journey. Il should say
there had; I've had two hens die, my
dog killed woodchuck, and Deacon
Tidd snapped horses with French
man; oh, this town has been lively
Boston Post.
aneuvering mamma, who is anxious
daughters chief attraction should
Aot escape the notice of the very eligi-
BILE young man who is taking her down
to supper. Maria, Maria!' Eyes,
mamma" Take your eyelashes out of
tangle, darling" And then the young
mans heart gets all snarled up in
those eyelashes.
Boston has new social club Of
young men named the Puritan club.
The old clown used to say that he
named his mule 'Huckle berry" be-
cause he was so fond of blackberries,
and we fear the young mems selection
OF the above Understanding title
has about the same degree of reasoning
in it.-Elnair0 Advertiser.
Religious joke: Some time since a
gentleman died, who, during life, re-
fused to believe in any future punish
ment. Two or three weeks after his
death his wife received through a spir-
itual medium the following communi.
cation: '.Dear wife, I now believe.
Please send my thin clothes and bar
rel of ice water. - Christian at Work.
''Well, wife, I'm going to get some
new clothes right away, = said Hart
ford man the other day; Il declare
look too shabby to 60 on the streets.
Why, l met q tramp on the street the
other day with enough site better look
ing overcoat on than I've got. s.Why
didn't you stop him and offer to tradep''
I didn't have the heart to insult the
tramp"
The car was brimful, but it stopped
to take on lady. She had scarcely
squeezed her way in when a man
squeezed his way out, and as he reach
ed the platform he growled: Here's
q fair sample of the hoggishness of
the men in Detroit!'' ..Howp'' s.Why.
the selfish wretches sat there and made
me give up my seat to my ownwife. :"
Detroit Free Press.
Henpecked husband: '.My dear,
why can't you treat me as loving young
wives do in novels. The husband
comes home worn and tired, and the
wife takes a fan and cools his brow. -
Wife: ''Step this way" Husband:
What are you going to dop'' Wife,
taking up mop: Il think you need need
cooling off. am going to mop your
brow. "-Basrlisgton Free Press.
There is q woman in Kansas City who
can scold her husband in eight langua-
ges. He hasn't such a warm time OF
It, however. Fortunately when he
went to college he didn't neglect his
baseball studies in order to master the
dead languages, and when his wife
switches off to the one language he
understands he has an engagement
down town. NoryistoaOs, Herald.
.'Boy!" he called as he snapped his
fingers at postofice bootblack, ''are
you the lad I handed dollar bill to
yesterday to get changed, and you beat
me out of Is centsp'' mo, sir.,''
Look out! How do you know you
ain't?' Cause; do [ look like q boy
who'd beat you out of shilling when
/ could walk off with the dollar?
Stranger, you must have got hold Of
some poor leetle kid who's just begun
business!'' Detroit Free Press. 80
. First Dear Girl. Only to think, We
came pretty near not going to Europe
this year" Second Dear Girl. How
horrid! What was the matter?n First
Dear Girl-..Why, mamma heard that
the companies were putting down the
charges for passage SO low that she
was afraid that it would get common
to cross. But then she found out that
the new rates were only for the steer
age. SO, Of course, it's all right, and
vel go as usual. But really, ! Waa