Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1884-08-01
LOOKS At FAMILY FACES.
what . Humorist Saw !, !
photograph Album.
How lie Pound Touna'ed after wading through
I7Si'l'alle Of its Fages

paydasiy' i''' was explains Burdetie. u
She was Z serious sort of a woman, L
Mrs. Squaretop and never smiled At j
ny feeble joke as she handed me the v
album to look over until her husband a
came in from the field. l had lust en- L
gagged summer board c
Lam man accustomed to family l
photographs You can't fool Inc on
them. ih@s sat up with them from
Halifax to Denver and I know them
by name andaght Pa and ma, and
hats grandaamd that's grandma and
here's upca George and this
is an aunt Of pas, she's very
wealthy andts no children and pa is
her fayorite nephew; and this is a
young lady lgent 10 school with and
this is brotha Henry and this is cousin
Sue and thbb Aunt IIattie's baby and
this is tolag man Henry went to
school with, ad-do you know who
this ISL Ahpu, now l won't listen
to another word, it amt bit like me
anyhow, its bHid and this is pas
clerk aud tBs-te, he, he-a young
man--no. Iwat tell you his name, he
lives in KictMo, and this is oh, my |
son, you cant strand me on photo
graph albums know just where the
family ends and the strangers file in.
So l praisi eyerybody's ugly, fat,
expressionlea staring, stupid mug in
Mrs. squard9ps album, and l hit
everything al right on the first and
second quars and was coming along
splendidiy and drew up on the stran-
gers just abltinSight of the distance
pole, and Rlally feel a little tired
then, and Esnyself on the strangers.
eAnd who | said, airily, sis the
placid old aal9 who had her face
ironed outYhse it was soft?"
"That vsur. Squaretop's mother, y
Mrs Squares said, half smiling, and
I felt elated Nidently the old lady
was neA. psaasSs,e looked.
DEA >caking,'' ! said
ing rms Aahady 'coliar?''
That wasAr. squaretop's great III
Gle grand id man, one of the signel
Of the declaration of independents
That is, heEould have signed it, 81
explained, only the soliciting commi
tee got all the signatures they want'
just Defore they got to him. l hi
struck q snag, but not a bad one. II
uncle was out of place, anyhow. l
ought to berun down. l laughed al
said
This old boy who has just be-
blown up in powder mill-did h
friends know that he contemplat
this photograph 2"
That was her fathers cousin w
was very dear to her. 1t has alwa
been considered by good judges an {
cellent picture. She said it again, al
left out the good and placed the e
phasIs on plain, unadorne1 iudg
somehow wished she wouldn't.
Inext found a pirate stricken wi
which proved to be her ha
)rother, whom she loved more deal
han any Of her own brothers. and tn
tried to even up by praising t
'ngellc lace on the opposite page. 4
here was face for man to 10,
here was a countenance to shine in
mans home and his heart like 81
light ah-hl
1t was Mr.. Squaretop's FIRST wife.
Then | went at it again and tried
heck the falling thermometer by S
ng that the imbecile with the Gu
lar would look less like an ass if
lad simply had his hat photograph
IS tnat was evidently what he
,ouowed that silk tile for, but as
mbecile was Mrs. Squaretop's dear
ousin, it was a failure, and | sett
own for a final effort on "the sql
With the snub nose," and wonde
f he had as many brains as he |
uttons and freckles. adding that
vas marvellous how awfully bli
ed hair always took in a photogra
t was Mrs. Squaretop's eldest S
low at West Point, and | '
realty relieved by the opportl
ntrance of Mr.. squaretop, Sr.,
hat moment. He bowed and
waited for an introduction. 1
"Ihls was Mr.-ah-" she said.
"Featherly,' l said, bowling.
"Leatherhead," she accepted swt
:; he came to look at the two roc
Il Vno SouVn wing, Dut i think Il
viii hardly suit him. They are scal
: airy enough.
didn't want them to think l '
unnlng away or was frightened,
0 l sauntered down the road afte.
aid good-by, with slow motions,
aklng awful strides. So l wasn't
hundred yards down the road bef
Mr. Squaretop emerged over the
hard fence. calling on me to stoI
minute. lie might as we'll have as
ne 70 stop a whole week. A man ,
n the habiliments of the plowbo,
lot arrayed for a foot-race, and be
WdS Qulfn aarooo Al. =.