The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1884-11-28
THE BALANCE-sHEET oFAN ExlsTENc
From the Canadien des Etats-Unis.
Translated for the Ne,c North West by David
Kenyon.

Translated for the NeU North West by Daui
| Kenyon.
Paul Legrand-doubtless . maniac-shal
we say also q philosopher ?-was about t,
die at the age Of seven.y-ons years. Befor,
saying farewell to this life, the old man con
ceived the wish Of consigning to paper q,
account Of his joys and sorrows. It is
double existence, with an active and pas
sive side, and balance total. Here is th,
singular epistle left by this original upon hi
table, some hours before his death:
"All suffering, pain, WEAKNESS, despair
sleep, anxiety, regret-ought to be struck out
Of life, because every one would escape from
them il 1t were permitted by the Deity.
"At the age of three years was weaned
At six years l could talk but indifferently
broke my skull when was nine years old
but recovered from it. must, then, strike
out the first nine years of my existence; fol-
how can this be called life-to drink mill
soured by the nurse, scarcely to be able to
talk, and TO break the skull?
"At nine years began my studies. wa
. stupid head, on account Of my broken era
| mum; was FESTIVE under instruction. Al
tas end Of two years learned the alphabet.
The letter Q cost me about 400 blows oil
the ferule; the twenty-three other letters
martyrized me. At twelve years knew how
to read; but had . body striped with the
scars Of the alphabet.
"They tried to teach me Latin; / forgo,
my French. At fifteen years knew nothing
at all, and was q mere skeleton from hav.
ing been fed on dry bread and water. Six
years more to be struck out.
81 was fifteen years old when my fathe,
made me clerk to . Notary. Then com
menced new kind of msrtyrdom. 1 arose
At six o'clock, swept the Office, built the
fire, was cufTed about by the older clerks
and my father, loaded with reprosches on my
account, deprived me of dinner. led this
life five years, which strike out completely
from my life.
"At twenty my father, disguised with me
embarked me for CherbouIg. washed the
deck, hauled in the cables, climbed tn the
topmasts, reefed the sails, and received
on the back, at least thirty blows Of the cat
'o-nine-tails day. This lasted four years
no longer had back.
"At twenty-four my father made me 9
haberdasher. He married me to the daugh-
ter Of q turner. The next day learned that
my wife had q wooden leg-turned by hel
father. The poor woman made me q thou.
sand excuses. pardoned her in considera-
ton of her dowry-a claim on a sugar plan
tation in Guadeloup. But very soon after.
wards the blacks Of Guadeloup made an
instruction and burned my dowry. Then
remained to me only the wooden leg.
"At thirty years lost my wife Of tumor
in the sound leg. had passed six years OF
married life in repeating every moment
what q simpleton was to have taken that
Lego 1 strike out, then, these six years OF
my life.
"Hsving, like all the rest of the world,
slept one-third of the time, strike out
twsnty-four years of sleep, and this estim ate
is too low, for am great sleeper.
"One year has been lost, q minute at .
time, in reaching for the key of my secre-
tary, which l always am looking for. Does
one live while searching for q key? Three
years lost In saying: what time Is 1t p st
Is very bad weather to-day Il have cold, ,
ALIAS alasp etc. Six months lost In dust
ing my coat and brushing my hat. One year
in suffering between the acts at the theatre.
One year in listening to new dramas. One
year in complaining of soups too salt or too
sweet, outlets overdone, indigestion and hard
eggs.
"Total: Seventy-one years.
"In rendering my life to the Deity do not
feel that give up much"