The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1884-04-15
Sense and sNuqssnse.

Y
In thirty7eighs years the number OF
English daily papers has increased from
Ia to 179.
Shave YOU seen George lately, Char
ley2' "No; i loaned him S5 as much
as three weeks ago.. ss
Father-"I never imagined that your
studies would cost me so much money" !"
S Sudent-"Yes, and j don't study mach,
either" "rae -a ns ,>e,44ssl :,
Care will kill cat. The care must be
exercised IN taking aim It is extremely
difficult, however, to hit one in the dark
witha bottle. 81
Chicago boasts OF a lady, now 81
years old, who used TO sit in G Gorge
Washington's lap. The more we hear
Of George the more we get shocked.
A bill has been Introduced into the
House OF Commons to bumanizs the
children, computed at $4,000, who live
on barges and in travelling vans.
Q,een Victoria's well-known objection
to making poor men peers gave way in
the case Of Lord Tennyson. His eldest
son is clerk In public Office.
She sang, II Want to be an. Angel"
and he declared she was one already
To this she blushIngly demurred. Then
he married her. Demurrer sustained.
"But are you sure she I'll accept you 2"
asked Duff1x OF Frink. who was about to
'.pop." "Accept mep You bet she will !!
She's like my clothes-ready-maid! !"
"There is a single sentence in the Eu-
glish foreign enlistment act which con-
tains 800 words. A longer sentence was
that of Nav York judge the other day.
1t contained twenty years.
A rooster has been born with only
one wing in Dooly county, Ca, in or.
der to give paragrsphist an opportu.
nifty to say that 1t resembles some chin.
neys-i. e ii has defective few.
"Do you suppose eating angel cake
will make an angel OF me y" asked se-
raphic young lady OF the worldly young
man. ,"lf you only eat enough Of it !"
Then she glggled and said: "Why ?"
"A visitor who wss put in the 'tspare
room" one night recently, when the tenn
perature was lingering near zero, avoided
fatal cold by stunning the. bed and
sleeping onthe marble-top bureau.
Professor of chemistry: "Suppose you
we're called to q patient who fhad swal,
Lowell heavg dose of oxslic acid. what.
would you administer1" rStudeni, oil
Theological bent:. THE sacrament" ,s
There is postmastet In Texas who
has been in three wars and has lived IN.
der Ave governments, says news item.
II he has been married five tim We
can't imagine why he has been in only
three wars. sids
.sUacle, when sis sings In the choir
Sunday nights, Why does che 60 behind
the organ and taste the tenor's NOUS
tache 1'' s.Oh, don't bother me, sonny!
suppose they have to. do it to find out
IL they're in tune. -
While the remains of the late Wendell
Phillips were awaiting the final ceremo-
MES Cambridge friend asked Mr., Hoar
II he wss going to attend the funeral
"No," was the reply, .:'but ] approve it."
"It is said thst Ell Mahdi allows no.
body TO APPROACH him who, does not
come on all.fours," 1t may be inferred
from this that he would treat the Ameri-
can hog witha little more respect that
is shown by Prince Bismarck.
The. Burning QUESTION: Mistress to
new cook-"On Wednesdays and Satur-
days shall go to market with you y
New caok-sVery we'll, mum but who's
a goin' to carry the basket the other
DAYS, num-" A 3g
Rev George n Hepworth calculates
that he has male more enemies by telling
the truth at funerals than In any other
way II ought to draw crowds, though
Telling the truth at funerals is great
novelty. s'ssl nai
At the Stock Exchange: "My dear
boy, the business world Is divided into
camps, the gamblers aud the specula-
tors" 81 dent exactly see the differ
euce," sits very simple. The specu-
lator is the one who gains. When man
loses he is only gambler!"
Kansas sends good practical farmer
to Congress. 1t would be we'll if there
were more OF them in the halls of ma
tional legislation. There would then be
more work and less talk. An old fash.
ioned farmer would not 60 to bed in the
morning and breakfast at noon.
The Berliner Tageblatt states that six
ty.eight months Of imprisonment were
during 1888 inflicted on the editors of
six newspapers ia the province Of Posen
alone, and that only two Of the political
papers there have at this moment their
editors out of prison. Germans pay
dearly for their United Germany.