Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1884-10-30
ExPLAINRD.

EXPLAINED.
How ToreAlisht Prpeessisas Make
Vetes-
Wife who wants n learn.
haps. it's because In, soaly = woman,
and not intended BY nature to COM
prehend these larger things Of life'-
as you frequently fsnind me, my
dear-but I really ,vish you would
explain SO that I could undaestand
what earthly use II is to anybody to
have these campaign cluhs uniforms,
banners, fireworks and hideous
torch-hght professions every night"
Husband (wbo is delighted to
teach) That is plain enough . my
one, or should be, my love. Ithsan
essential part Of tho campsign ma
ehinery, only less important than to
have candidates and parties. All
these things create enthusiasm, and
| II is enthusiasm that wins. The red,
white and blue lights, the gorgeous
trappings, the glitteling pageant, the
bombs bursting in air, the shouts Of
glad acclaim-all these 60 far to set
tie the business. A big torch-light
procession that takes two hours and
half in passing q given point is a
knoek-down argument in itseh-don't
you seeT"
"You mean it nails campaign lies.
as you call it-shows that the SIAN
ders were false, washes OF the mud
thrown by miscreant maligners,
proves the candidate pure patriot,
convinces the intelligent citizen, and
so makes votes for cur side?"
Precisely, my love. 1 see you
have got that point clearly enough
q little ornate and voluptuous, a. 1t
were, but essentially correct. II is
evident your sex is getting educated
up to comprehension of the undying
principles that control the political
system OF our republic.
A resounding smack.
"We all take pride in learning now
We have a candidate of our own, of
course. But there's one minor point,
my dear, that I wish you'd make just
a little palmer. You say professions
make votes?"
"Precisely."
"Then a parade Of Plumed knights
convinces every one that Mr.. Blaine
did not write that Morey letter, and
that he doesn't know how to write,
anyhow
"My lsre!"
"And a crowd Of men in red caps,
silver-plated capes and green leg
gings likewise convince every one
that Mr.. Cleveland never vetoed q
bill, and that he doesn't know = veto
when he sees one
"Julia!"
'And mob of men and boys got
up like guys from g Western circus
stuck by cyclone, yelling like Com
anches, and a brass-band, make it
plain as day to the most ordinary in
telligence that General Butler never
stole spoon, and wouldn't know q
spoon if it was stuck into his mouth
full Of hot soup
| Julia Ann ~
"And that lot Of cranks dressed
to resemble chain-pumps, water-cool-
ers, ice-chests, reservoirs, hose-csrts,
old oaken buckets and streetsprink.
lers, perambulating Broadway at mid.
night, would settle it that Mr.. st.
John won't have any guns in his can.
yass, because they have to get 'load-
ed and that he wasn't brought up or
bottle"
"Julia DIM STEBBINs (! Ano
oh, yes, go on! And q woman
who has got the politics of her coun'
try down as fine as you have from
her cook book and Bdzdr ought to bs
Secretary of State in Belva Lock
woods Cabinet; and a crazy-quil
hung out for . lockwood campaign
banner shows the state of mind o.
; the man who is fool enough to tr,
; and find out what his uwife dom
know about Presidential Elections il
one lesson"
ua Will na II