Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1884-12-24

plainly see, if you will kindly observe tn
agitated state Of the left side Of my waist
coat. But not to keep you waiting, whic
once, beg to inform you that Pm in Low
lin love with the new housekeeper as is t.
be-"
Cries of "Oh, Oh! Did you ever p
"Who'd have thought it ?''
"Yes, continued John, with smar
blow on the supposed region Of his affec
tion, ''I'm in love; and that you may
know that hadn't got my eye on anything
but her own lovely and fascinating person
desire to inform you in this here public
way that offered her my devotion and my
hand before she knew she was to be riser
to her present high position"
Indeed - said the chairman; deeply in.
terested; "and did she refuse you, my
| friend? ?''
"WeH, can't say exactly that she did
that" replied John, dropping his voice to
It's natural tone. sIn fact, can't remem.
Der exactly what she did do on that inter.
esting occasion; but this l know-she was
not unkind, and my hopes kept rising, un-
| til found out had got rival"
''Gcod gracious" cried the maids.
"By jingo?" exclaimed the men.
ssWbo is it?" asked the butler, pretend
ing that he was not the least particular
| about an answer.
"Who do you think?" replied John,
looking from one to the other. ''You'll
never guess-neverr'
"No, never" responded the eager audi
ence.
'.And so I must tell you," said John,
with heavy sigh must tell you that
Mr.. Roland Cavel is trying to cut me out
| see him and her. talking quite confiden-
tial in the shrubbery one day, and beg to
state as how think my Lady Maud would
not have left him her property. and
Janet the excellent position of housekeeper
which we all covets, if she had known
what was going on. However, as l hear
he is going abroad for a matter of three
years, its like may persuade her to have
me before bis return. Ladies and gentle
men, do you think ought to stay in the
house and do my wooing, or get situation
near at hand, and call pretty often to see
how you are all getting on?"
swell, we did our wooing here in the
house." said tho butler; ''didn't we,
Mary?''
''Yes," answered Mary; 'sbut we've had
to get into holes and corners, which amt
20 pleasant as strai ghtforward affair."
forbidden fruits the sweetest, my
DEAR" whispered the butler SO loudly that
everybody heard him.
Likely" replied the pretty housemaid,
pertly; but if were John l would 90.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Il
do believe, Richard, if you had not been
always bnzzing around me. plaguing me
with your jealousies every time spok- to
better"
'.Oh, dear mer' gasped the butler.
"What are you talking about, Mary?"
'What l am talking abont, Richard,
dear?" echoed Mary, innocently. "Why,
you must have been dreaming not to have
heard I've been advising John to get an.
other place, because it amt natural Miss
Janet Mason will like to give him orders if
she intends to favor his suit
'Tha' 8 t'ue." cried virgin chorus; Sin
course she'd have to box his ears for the
look of the thing if he put his arm round
her waist"
"Certainly," assented the chairman.
And then, turning to John, he remarked,
with as much coolness as he could com
mand, "The ladies all seem to be in favor
of your leaving, my dear fellow"
Yes" growled the gardener; "now the
grapes are sour-now you are no longer
person to be sought in marriage!'
''Oh, you cruel man!' cried the ladies.
"What motives do you put down to us, to
be surer'
''O,der, orderr' exclaimed the butler.
fercely, "John is about to tell us what he
will do.
''Is he'' murmured the footman, trem-
bling like an aspen-leaf. ssHe wishes be
knew. This here love does make fools of
us all! declare amt had mind of nv
own since was took with the disease"
"Then we must help you to decision"
said the butler pompously.
'1f you please" replied John, folding
his hands in a pleading attitude, which
was very touching. .'What would you ad-
wise me to do, ladies and gentlemen?o
sGo!' screamed the maids.
"Stay! shouted the men
sDear mep' cried the chairman; ssthis is
very perplexing. We had better toss up"
And he was about to draw forth from his
pocket the coin necessary for this action,
when loud knock at the front street door
startled all the company out of their seats
and sent them scampering right and left
with chair or wine-glass. It was Janet
Mason.
ITO be continued.]