The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1884-11-01
AN EDITORS DREAM.

BY SCOTT WAY.
Tread by the author before the Peninsular
Press Association during the literary eXer-
cises of the Annual Convention on steamer
Breakwater.l
Once upon time village editor sat
in his quiet sanctum industriously pc
rusing the political editorials in his
daily city exchanges. At length that
which he read began to have its legiti-
mate effect; the editor nodded once,
twice, thrice; his eyes closed, the city
daily fell from his nerveless fingers,
and three flies lit upon his bowed bald
head and balanced all, and swung cor
ners, and swung corners and crossed
over, and promenaded all around, to
the music of the rythmical editorial
snore. The village editor was asleep;
and sleeping, the village editor
dreamed:
and aching head. The last local item
had gone into type, the last inside read
ing notice had been set up, and the
youngest apprentice stood grimly by,
with lines of impotence upon his
brow and daub of ink under his left
eye, waiting for more copy. Suddenly
there was a step without, the door
opened, a man entered, and taking the
vacant chair in front of the editor
desk, to which the editor had politely
called his attention. he said
''My dear sir; my name is John W.
Smith. | am subscriber to your pa
per, as you very well know, and being
in town to-day thought | would take
the opportunity to call and tell you that
l like your paper, all but one thing; you
deR,t>print enough matter on the tariff
question: Poetry and stories and funny
paragraphs and local items may do well
enough to fill up paper with in ordi-
nary times, but just now the country is
awake to the tariff question, and if YOU
want to keep your paper alive you've
got to give your subscribers light on
the tariff. You should not have less than
three columns of editorial and five col
umns of extracts on the tariff every is
sue. That's all I've got to say, and |
hope you II bear it in mind. BY the way,
| owe you for two years subscription,
and one of these days I'll call in and
pay it. Don't forget to let yourself
loose on the tariff; goodbye"
As the man who wanted more light
on the tariff passed out, little nerv-
ous-looking person came in and took
the vacant chair.
"Ahn he said, with smile that
didn't look strong enough to be out,
''ah, my dear man, | see you are alb
sorbed in thought, as an editor always
should be. And that reminds me that
you are neglecting almost totally neg
lecting science. Too much of poll
tics, too much of politics, my dear
man; Your paper will never grow in
circulation while yon neglect science
for politics. You should devote not
less than four columns a week to sci
ence. That is all came in to say. Be
in some day and pay you for my sub
scription. Good day; don't forget to
give us plenty of science"
The footsteps of the man who wanted
science had not gone beyond the edi-
tors hearing, when q third visitor en-
tered and took the vacant chair as if
he were accustomed to sit in it.
81 am sorry to note that you are neg
lecting politics Just at this important
period" he said, kindly, but gravely.
"You should strive to keep the vital
principles of our party constantly be-
fore the people.
81 like your paper in all but its lack in
this respect, and some day, perhaps at
the beginning Of next year, | will sub
scribe for it. | see it now every week
at Browns Office. If you would write
about five columns of fresh political
editorials every week, you'd see your
paper going right up in circulation.
That's what | told Brown yesterday,
and he agreed with me. A story and
an article on science occasionally,
with u little local matter and a few
marriage and death notices to please
the women are all well enough, but
can tell you that q country paper to
amount to anything and nave influence,
has got to be full of political matters.
That is all [ want to say. When you
want any points on politics. I'll be glad
to help you out And, by the way;
don't forget that | am a candidate for
the Legislature. Good day"
The next visitor that took the va
cant chair which sat in front of the
village editors desk spoke as follows:
81 stopped in to-day, sir, to tell you
that | do not want your paper any
longer, In some respects it is a good
paper, but you do not print enough
news matter. You should print at least
full page of news | don't care any
thing about your protective tariff and
tariff for revenue only, or anything of
that sort. | want the news when
take paper. l want full account of