The Arkansaw traveler., 1884-03-08
THE CHRONIC osuMsLER.
rreASnn

ASues A m1n wants a ttAtA aI hounds 10 chase doctor down and catch him, when man Is sick, but If he k well he can't 70 block without running over halt dozen of them, and the sick man smelled ci box ot toiis, soap on the show case
 Had trouble hnd,n1 doctor. eh ?" said the druggist as he went behind the prescription case and poured some ted stait out ot bottle, holding the Sotk ,a his mouth Well. doctors atc human like the rest o uS. and the ant hc (, cry where A once
 Who wants them te he everywhere at once sa,d the atamhlet .ss he picked up bottle ot rose extract on the show SAse, and sdutt,ed abau, len cents worth on an old, ditty handke,e hset z Doctors ought ,o be in then off cs where you tan \ I them the arap II ise hat. How How does a doctor when A man IS going io have cole He must take i, tor granted that somebody Is getne to have Il all the tune. and se tcad, to go Ii man ts run over m the street. oi drops down ~,th sunstteke oI apoplcNy. fifteen doctors will he on the spot in two mn. utes, and each will glare al the other as though the other sas standing around looking for loh anal then they will ali refuse to help the man until professional courtesy Is satisfied, and II is thoroughly understood whose pat,cn, the man s Hut II am taken sick tn the night l mas t,ng the crank ott my telephone. and yell htc and murder. and have ,a gruns |, out uil morning 1 was sick hall the nigh,. and couldn't ring up a doctor. and ,his morning 1 wen, down ,o blow up four different ones that l tucd to call. and cash ane ei them apulogl4cd ny sas- ,ng he was oas all n,shl ~,ih A patient, liah l knaw they didn't all have patients siek all night They ko, to hcd and d,dnt want In get up. Huppnse ! had died, couldn have sued thein tet dam. ages t''
 :" don't believe. where you sfe eanx when you die thc ,out, would have lui isdasuon in the case. said the dtugKts, lodging bchlnd ihe pres, iitfion sassc faf icu the >iek man would thtow ;, bottle ot citrate oi maenesta G hun " But. honestly. doctors have pfci, hafd ume bcing pulled out at bed al .ll tunes ot the nlsh, when people iniagtue they ate s,sk So~. II you had been .cg atk. the doctors would have ges ta you toe quick. but they kue~ II ~ss only d tenn paIaty allan ~ith you, ot na pAttie alai consequence. and that you would he all fight tn the inolataR, so they thought il sts better iot them to sleep and the dtugKist pat label an the bottle and told the customer | would be >eY YrntY itse eents ten eata iaf the meail.t and sfsty hse eeHfs fei the bottle
 M come aens [ = sa,i the sit m sh What da ,eu call t when everything inside man geta in ihc wrong place. and tries to get hack where Il belongs and each vital part gets te laaitei,ng ssth the other and there Is A regular rough ,nd tumble hslt In il any con ec9u nc when man is doubled up stth P1tn hc an stan E, gum l had there ioGt hours. thinking | would bust. and came down tht. naninR to ~hlp son~ doctors. but thsy bcKge. oil on the ground that they ~etc not at home. Another thing ths, ls no, luat uRht la doctors joking a siek slan. l, may de to loke some men when they are Nck. but when 1 call a doctoi. ! van, him io look solemn though | WAS gosng to die. Then when fellow ge,A wcll, h- feels though doctor amann'ed ia som ething. whereas, fl a doctor comes m and Iokes. and tells stories. and saJS you aIr all tight and all yon want Is to stay in the house day T, t~o. you kl,k on paying inc bill Who wants Ia pay tao dollars Ntait h have do,tof tone in and tell ,0u ,n take more rsef,i isc and no, eat ao much : What ~ani is pilis and powders. when l am sltk. an. no, social infrtsoufae," and the g,anbler 'ook the cork oat ,,s h'A bottle and smei, ot the medicine
 c. don't know, satd the dfuggia. ss he tttcd to sell the siek man 4 razor io ,a, his throa, with '' ,h,ak A good dnctoi ought to br ,hretfd and soei- able
 es hu, condemn them they can over do Il. sald the old grnnflcr Sou. you remember last Autnfnef when | had touch oi dfopay My doctor looked me over and ~lih A sober ieak told me he would have to operate on inc, and he wanted Co have a consultation ~lih an other pfaicsstanal man That scared me, and felt as though ssa getting the worth of my money. bu. when asked hum ~ho he ~antrd fos consultation, he aaid he ~aaied plumber Then he laughed When a irlio~ ha. 70, dfopsy he don't want ap plumber and don't you fot Rr' ' sos mg doctor s A good tcllos bu' ~hsn he wants e. look ai my tongue he s1ys f4a og' that inpe e.ghi ar ten iufheA My tongue ls n8 tffp~. ard no m 4a must sAy sa. When ] had 2 holl an ny ne he une ln one day when ~As feeilnT mad enough to dir. sBd be sad Hello. old cll8sa,onc Park how ts yoaf sssses today That made TIC hot When ! tell aos for that l ,hinh one of my lungs is about gone don't @4s' hsrn to aay that 1 ~lll be all ugh, ~ilh one iang ss long .s l have two kaiis. Such things always seem ,o me io be tpfing ~lsh 1sroaA sutscn Hs: x.s mad when my iivef go, out oi order and the doctor looked me over and told me ~ould die unless 1 took his psescrip,ion, and then he went down to hard~Are store and sept me ap Saw -bgek and