The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1883-01-26
wITTICISMS.
A window-shutter-the porter.

a Enthusiastically porter.
a pointer: IL YOU can't spell. write
such a bad hand that nobody can tell
what the letters are.
The use of iron cam t increase the
running qualities Of a dog. but tin can.
-RocklaId Gazette.
The man who couldn't stand it any
longer has taken n seat, and now feels
quite comfortable.
A country editer has been made the
victim of a diamond robbery. Ills OPP
pOneut stole the ace of that suit out of
the pack.
This insurance policy is a queer
thing" said Dobbs rehectively. IF |
can't sell it, l cancel it; and. if | cancel
1t, can't sell it,"
The lady t~rapezists are green with
Jealousy over a newspaper paragraph
that tells # a bride who walked in on
her fathers arm"
There are some marriages which re-
mind us of the poor fellow who said,
"She couldn't get any husband, and l
couldn't get any wife, so we got mar
Tied."
First small girl a know what l am
going to be Wien | grow upr' Second,
ditto-"What are you going to be when
you grow up?' First small girl-"A
widdert"
Little Lottie to her friend: 81 have
so many cares. Yesterday a little baby
sister arrived and papa is on a journey.
1t was but a piece of luck that mamma
was at home to take careof It,"
Since an intelligent jury indicted a
man who shot his wife, by mistake, for
"A stray cat, a great many Connecticut
husbands have lost all confidence in
the jury system.
A mar took his seat in the BARRIERS
chair; he asked the barber if he had the
same razor he used two days before.
Being answered affirmatively, the pa
tient man said: "Then give me chloro-
FORM"
One cannot but view with alarm the
reported growth of sponge culture in
Florida, for any one who has suffered
from the experience knows that the
cultured sponge is the very worst of the
whole species,-Boston Transcript.
A loving couple in Iowa were, says
the local chronieler, separated by "a
cold cloud of frozen realism" 1t is
evident that it was not the hash ques-
,tion that disturbed them. However
cold or frozen hash may be, it has never
been described us a realism.
When a Frenchman wants to say
."How do you do i"he renders it allow do
you carry yourselfY OF course this
wouldn't do in America, where lots of
men meyer carry themselves. They
make the policemen do it.
Times must be growing bad when
the clock business becomes dull, as i,
now the case in Connecticut. The
clock hands never strike, however, and
though always seen outside the works,
they cane do more there than they could
INSIDE.
BY the aid of a telephone a banjo
player was heard twenty-five miles.
There is a great advantage in having
an audience at this distance. If the
music is intensely a%ggravating, the
listeners can't throw stones and things.
Even a rifle won't carry twenty five
miles.
4 gentleman lost a pocketbook con-
tanning s. in money and a lock of his
girls hair, which he valued very highly.
"A reward Of S25 was advertised would
be paid the finder. Early the. following
morning the whole business was re-
turned to him intact. This little Incl
dent not only shows the value of adver-
tisements, but it also establishes the
fact that honesty is by no means I'M
common.
Ayoung author was telling us of his
woes with regard to a book. Said he:
~ gave it to II publisher to read, and
he accepted it and said he would pub
lish it. But three days later he con
mitted suicide. Then showed it to
another publisher. lie agreed to pub
i.sh 1t, and the next week took all his
partners money and fed to Europe.
And then-what the blazes are YOU
laughing at s"-Boston Post.
When he had called the meeting to
order. Brother Gardner arose and said
."Gen'len, if it wasn't for de wheels on
a wagon the wagon wouldn't move.
When de wheels is on, den What 2"
Grease" solomnly exclaimed an old
man. "KerrectF" whispered the pres
ident. softly rubbing his hands togeth-
er. 1--WE hez de wagon an de wheels.
W. will now pass de hat aroun' for de
grease. Detroit Free Press.
(Which am de ]nrOnarpst wav to cun-