Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1883-04-19
A Race For a Kiss.

A butter peddler from Honey Lake
relates, with great glee, how neighbor
of his was cured of too frequent tipping &
the gin bottle, This neighbor married
a young, handsome and spirited lady,
and for a month or two all went well in
the house and about the farm then the
husband fell back into his old tricks.
The wife demonstrated, and, for time,
the husband reformed. Presen tly, how.
ever, she became satisfied that the "bot
tle.tipping" was again going on. When
she spoke to her husband about the
matter he swore that the aroma" she
detected was that of a, collie medi
cine he was taking, he having develop
ed most intractablc collie, Tor the re.
lief OF which he had brought home and
paraded bottle Of medicine.
The wife was confident that there
was kept somewhere about the premises
a considerable store of very different
kind of medicine. She kept her own
counsel, and at the same time, strict
watch. In a day or two she discovered
un Ter q manger in the barn the secret
hoard. She said nothing of the dscoy.
cry to her husband.
Soon after the husband had business
at neighbor's some two miles away.
ON his return he Was somewhat surpris.
ed at seeing note pinned upon his
front door. lie hastily advanced and
read as follows
BEN: You will find the key OF the
house where you keep your collie medi
cine. have taken Kitty and gone
home to my mother. Father and
Brother Bob will come tomorrow for
the trunk in which have packed my
things. NELLIE.
The husband rushed to the barn. At
glance he saw that Kitty, his wifes
mare and the side saddle were gone.
Darting to the manger he hauled out
his corpulent demijohn Of gin, and sus.
pended from its neck found the key Of
the house.
Securing the key, he sent the demi.
john whizzing and crashing against tho
post of the barn. Bounding forth, he
ran to and mounted the horse he had
left standing in front of the house
Away he dashed. 1t was ten miles to
the house of his father.in.law, and he
was determined to overtake his wife be.
fore she could reach it or kill horse in
the attempt.
Said the butterman "Now seed
Ben's wife come over the hill half
mile south Of my house, on her little |
mare Kitty, and begin to perform some
queer abolutions After she'd got over
the brow o the hill she paced up and |
down the road for time then she rid |
up and looked over the ridge for a while. /
After lookn' a bit she turned about and |
rid up and down the road a few times
then wentup to the brow o. the hill |
again. So she kept doin', and once or
twice she got oF and led Kitty up to |
the top Of the hill.
al was puzzled a. whether she was
waitin' for somebody or had lost some !
thing while on her way to her fathers /
place some four miles beyond my house.
/ was just about to walk out that way /
when | seed her wheel Kitty round |
from the brow o the hill and began to /
ply her whip.
ain half a minute she was flyin' past
my place like wild woman. I stood at /
my front gate by the roadside, ready TO /
holler out at her to know what was up,
but, bless you, she never looked towards
me. Her eyes seemed sot in her head,
her face was pale and at every jump
she let into Kitty with a whip. | swar,
her ridin' skirt fairly cracked as she
bounded past.
Jist then heard tremendous clat
ter behind me. Turnin' about, | seed |
Ben acomin over the pitch of the hill |
on his big black hos', like a wild Conan.
che. He was ridin' with loose reins,
leanin' away for'srd and diggin his big
spurs into his horse like he'd rip his in.
sides out.
ale passed by, with hair and coat.
tails saliin'bs in the wind, and never
.urning his head to right nor left.
thought | seed murder in his eye.
.ell you, a million thoughts went
through my brain in a second. All ato.
lies I'd ever heard about jealous hus.
bands went through my head in lump,
md do believe If I'd my gun in my
hand I'd have taken a wing shot at him
IN suspicion.
I seed Nell look back once and then
az the whip on Kitty hotter'n ever,