The Dawson journal., 1883-11-22
The Bride Who Didn't Die in
an old Chest.


an old Chest.
The fair Imogene D'Eustis had
TT. peen welded to the knightly Sam
Higgins. The clergyman had been
handed two dollars in cash to nav
Tor the splicing, the guests were
hlllng themselves with eatables.
and everything was sliding along
as smoothly as a cider mill sailin9
down on spring freshet, when all
at once the bride was missing.
Her newly found husband look
ed under the table, butshe was not
there. 80
The guest separated to search.
Some looked down the weli-oth-
ers down the cellar others in the
hen-house and smoke-house and
behind the pig-pen. No Imogene.
Then some said she had been
abducted, while others coffed at
the idea of girl weighing 1876
pounds and having a ascream which
could be heard two miles, being
carried off in broad day light, and
IN a neighborhood where the
Democrats had over 200 majority.
A detective was called in. He
looked at her old shawl, measured.
the length of her shoes, and de-
clded it was mysterious affair
lie would take the case If desired
but would not promise anything
satisfactory under year and a
half.
The fair Imogene's father hadn't
betrayed much excitement up to
this point. The wedding feast was
the first square meal he had had
for SIX months, and he wanted to
I'LL up before giving way to emo
ton. He was now full. He turn
ed around upon the excited and
distressed guests, command them
to hush hullaballo, and disap-
peared up stairs.
When the coy Imogene slipped
away from the feast It was to see
if her husband would miss and
follow her. She slid up stairs,
mounted to the garret, and after
brushing the cobwebs off her nose
she advanced to the big blue chest
in the corner. This chest had
been made to hold her fathers
government bonds, and was hoop
ed with iron and provided with
spring lock, which never cost less
than dollar. Her mission was
to hide in the chest and see if her
husband would be soft enough to
climb up there and throw up the
lid and call peek-a-boo. AS the
reader knows, he wasn't the man to
catch on.
The old man D'Eustis walked
up stairs and made his way to the
garTet through the same trap-door
the bride had used. He thought
she might be up there to take
last farewell look at the punches
of catnip, mouldy school books
and broken spinning g-wheels. He
could not see her. He called
aloud, but the whistle OF the tug
on the right was the only answer.
He turned to go, but something
whispered to him that perhaps he
might find a plug of tobacco or
bottle Of stomach bitters in the old
chest. He advanced with beating
heart and threw up the lid.
why, pop, is this your cried
the fair Imogene as she sprang up
and ripped her bridal dress clear
down, the back.
"Yes, this is me-" growled the
old man, "snd what the jimcracks
are you doing here?"
Hiding from SAM"
I'm a tarnal mind to box your
ears, big as you are! Here you've
raised a regular city convention
all over the house, spoilt q dress
which cost me S14 with the MAX
ing, upset your mother, and scarf
old Mrs. Spigot into it!"
"Please, pop, L"
"You git! Drap yourself
through that trap-door, skip down
there and tell the crowd that you
don't know beans when the bags
united"
And the bride got. And her
husband was 90 mad that he burn
ed up a free railroad pass to Chi
cago, and her mother cried, and
her father went off down town to
play poker, and taken all in all,
the coy bride and the old chest
and the spring lock business did
not play ten cents on the dollar