davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31

AT LAST we know what the Governor is.
Had we not been informed we might have
thought him an ornithorhyncus, an imported
specimen of the sacred tribe of India, or a
dummy constructed by the def hands of the
penitentiary ring, but we know better: He
is a man This startling statement was made
by a member of the Legislature who had
doubtless bestowed considerable attention on
the subject before forming an opinion. AS he
is member of the Legislature, and therefore
to be credited with all the wisdom which per-
tains to his class, the LIGHT will not contra
dict him. In fact the intelligence is a source
of qualification, and the people OF Texas
will breathe easier for having their
doubt removed, and,,will hand down to pos
terity, engraven with gold on scrolls of silver,
the name Armistead, Of the astute statesman
who boldly proclaimed the result of his labor
ious investigation. But in this connection the
LIGHT has one request to make. 1t hopes
that before the order is given for the inscriP-
ton which shall make Armistead famous
there will be eliminated from the record of his
astounding assertion one little word in limia-
ton. This is the word nothing and 1t has
place in the resonant exclamation, so produc-
tive of benefit to the human race, LAS to
the message from the Governor, he is nothing
but a man." AS the Hon. Mr.. Armistead
is a gentleman of more than ordinary attain
ments he will readily understand the reason
which prompts to this advice and will, like the
writer, conclude that if by omission or com
mission we can provide room for play of the
imagination of future generations it is but
right that we should do so. "He is nothing
but a man," is too precise. g He is man.
would render permissible all manner of con-
lectures as to whether the Governor was not a
demigod also, or at least a being gifted with
such supernatural power as to have foreseen
that the continuation for two years more of our
iniquitous convict system would necessitate
an appropriation of $500 900 for expenses.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
CanitaI Punishment.
From the st. Louis Globe Democrat.

From the st. Louis Globe Democrat.
The advocates and opponents of capital
punishment have each lately added a new
item TO their stocks of terrible examples. A
French lad was guillotned for the murder,
under unusually atrocious circumstances, of a
young girl, and now the doctors, after autopsy
duly performed, declare that he was insane.
On the other hand, in Italy, where
c,ptal punishment is rarely inflicted, it turns
out that the man who attempted five years
ago the assassination Of King Humbert has
ever since bsen confined in a darkened cell
and fastened to the wall with chain only five
feet long. He is now imbecile. The fate of
the latter does not seem much preferable TO
that of the French lunatc. The most earnest
humanitarian would probably fall in trying to
come to a satisfactory conclusion as to the
relative tenderness Of the two systems of pun
iShment
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31

EVERYBODY who takes an interest in the
horse will be pleased to learn that an effort is
making to arrange for a series of Saturday
afternoon races at San Pedro springs. This
afternoon three races will occur, and if the
attendance be sufficiently large they will be
the first of a series. In other cities equine
matinees never fail to attract large crowds and
here, where the horse Is held in high esteem,
il will be strange, indeed, if the attempt to in
auqurate them be unsuccessful.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
4 Fellow Feeling.

From the Arkansaw Traveller.
A gentleman was arraigned before an
Arkansas justice on a charge of obtaining
money under false pretenses. He had entered
a store to be customer, but proved to be a
thief.
"Your name is Jim Lickmore?" said the
justice.
Eyes ST."
"And you are charged with crime that
merits long term in the penitentary?"
''Yes, sir.
Sand you are guilty of the crime?'
Il am
"And you ask for no mercy?"
mo, sir"
"You have had great deal of trouble with
in the last two years."
eyes, sir, have"
"You have often wished that you were
dead?"
have, please your honor"
''You wanted to steal money enough to take
you away from Arkansas"
''You are righ'. Judge"
'Tf man had stepped up and shot you just
as you entered the store you would have said
Thank you, sir?'
ayes, sir, would. But, Judge, how did
you find out so much about me?'
"Some time ago." said the Judge, with a
solemn air, 81 was divorced from my wife.
Shortly afterward you married her The result
is conclusive. discharge you. Here take
this $50 bill. You have suffered enough.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31

THE infirmities of age creep on apace but
the Man of Iron towers above his fellows as
the kngly oak of the forest above the spruce
and the maple For many years he has been
the central figure of all Europe and his fall
would shake the German Empire as that of no
other could But about him there has ever
been magn influence which Of late has in
creased till become dangerous to the pos
SCISSOR as before it was deadly to other men.
II is his influence and it overshadows Ger
many as once the influence of Napoleon over
shadowed France until, as Emerson says,
men found that the exorbitant egotist mar
rowed. impoverished and absorbed the power
ard existence of those who served him and
the universal cry of France and OF Europe was
Enough of him-"Assez de Bonaparte ~
Bismarck now is crafty, and his real purposes
he hides behind the mask of liberal ideas.
But once, in a fit Of rage, he let drop this
mask and then it was he gave utter
auce TO thought which marked him as
an aristocrat and despot. 'All great
cities" said he, ''should be swept from the
face of the earth, for they are the centres Of
Democracy and constitutionalism." This ut
terance stamped him as foe to progression
and to popular government and whatever oil
Tberality he assumes he will always be looked
on with suspicion by those he serves while
with hatred by those whom his absorbing
egotism has deprived Of the power and PriVil'
eyes to which they thought themselves justly
entitled His position is a menace to the
freedom of The nation and his sentiments
death to hope Of advance in form OF govern
ment. His power is greater than that OF the
Emperor, and as he has built the empire and
mad. II subservient to his will he, as did
Richelieu exclaim of France, may exclaim Of
Germany, 81 en- Germany"
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
They are Locally Various.

From the Utica Herald.
The Buffalo Courier says S. J. Randall
''does not represent the views of the majority
of the Democratic party on the tariff. ques'
ton," and cannot be Speaker. 1t was sup
posed once that General Hancock represented
the views of the Democratic party on the
tariff, but there has been some dispute over
his position. What are the views of the Dem
ocratic party on the tariff, anyway?
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
PUBLISHED DAILY except SUNDAY, BY THE
EVENING LIGHT PUBLISH'G co.
s35 COMMERCE STREET.

NELIvERED by carriers throughout the clI Guy
aTent. Single copies for sale by newsDoys az
Cents.
Subscription Per Year, So in Advance.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31

Tom OCHILTREE is to receive his salary.
Comptroller Lawrence has decided that re-
tanning it would be interference with con-
stitutional prerogative as it would deprive him
of means of support and his constituents OF
representation. The decision was expected.
There were no good reasons why moments
consideration should have been given to the
proposition to withhold.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
SATURDAY, MARCH 81, 1888.

THIS is a great country. Here Nature does
for US what has to be wrought elsewhere by
man. Not having any cars to blow up we
had about decided to be content without eX-
periencing the pleasure of an explosion when
the gratifying news comes that nine shocks of
earthquake have been felt in California and
that series is to progress in this direction.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31

Entered at postoffice at San Antonio, Texas,
as secoud-class matter.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
Miscellaneous.
J. c. BREEDING & SON,
ARCHIT E CT S.
Room No. 3, upstairs, in Telephone building,
southwest corner of SOledad and
Houston streets.
PATENT TIN ROOFING PLATES.

PATENT TIN ROOFING PLATES.
The best i'm use. Manufactured by the Ma
tional Sheet Metal Roofing company, Nash
willie Tennessee. 1t makes the best roof and
is very ornamental. The plates are Of differ
ent sizes and may be of any grade OF tin de-
sired. Expansion and contraction from heat
and cold does not effect this roofing. Farmers
can use it as readily shingles. 1t is iire-proot
and ornamental. 1t is very popular where IT
has been introduced Call and see samples and
the agent in the Telephone building, southwest
corner of Soedad and Houston streets, room
No J. upstairs. J. G. BREEDING & SON,
2 II I'm Architects
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
a DIV ENTISINU Nh I M
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Entered at pOstoffce at San Antonio, Texas,
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The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31

The Rev. Edward Everett Hale, Of Bosion n,
coniradicts published. story that he is going
to Mexico, but says that he is writing a work
on Mexico.
The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-03-31
The Ge'n'n-IngIiSh School,

The now term will begin on Monday, the 2nd
dav Of April next. Applications for admission
Will bC RECEIVED from to-day by the secretary,
Mr. n. TCnEg.
Parents aud guardians are particularly re-
uuCstcd Ia note that scholars for the sixth or
lowest '.ass will be received only at the begin
ming Of the new term, and not during the
same. +. GROOS, President.
san Antonio, March Is, 1883.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

Through telescope. or by means Of
a smoked glass, the spots now on the
suns surface afford interesting objects
for study. By means Of right angled
prism the image of the sun can be
thrown from the eye piece of the teles-
cope upon a white washed wall or q
screen Of paper, and then the observer,
dividers In hand, can measure at his
leisure yawning chasms thousands Of
miles across, and narrow bridges that
stretch completely across the chasms and
change their form from hour to hour.
II the earth, says the New York Sun,
could be hurled into the sun like solid
shot into target. the hole thus made
would be small beside one Of these en-.
ormous sun caverns, which sometimes
form and disappear within few days.
Nobody can have any idea Of the real
aspect Of the flaming globe which shines
overhead every day. seeming always
the same to the ordinary observer. until
he has seen it with a telescope when
great suR-spots are pitting its surface
and the dazzling photoshere is thrown
up into mountain ridges Of fire.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11
Abnormal Development.


They were knitting stockings
for themselves, as the freak OF
fashionable handiwork now is.
| says Clara Belle.
.fCast on 124 stitches equally
on four needless" said the one
who had offered to instruct the
others, sand knit BIT rounds for
the leg two stitches plain and
then two purIed Then begin to
marrow for the ankle, according
to circumstances.
Hush, said one Of her COM
panions, startled by the steps oil
the three fellows taking THEREAFTER
dinner smoke in the adjoining
room.
They had heard the instructions
about narrowing the stockings
from leg to ankle "ascording to
circumstances, and they couldn't
resist the desire to let the girls
know it by covert remarks, such
as polite creatures could neither
get angry nor laugh at. There
fore the girls planned and execut-
ed revenge. In the momentary
absence Of their tormentors they
hastily pulled a stocking on the
leg Of the piano. and set the end
into slipper. The foot and
ankle looked normal enough, but
above that tho carved wood
swelled into what would have
been fit for a museum if compos-
ed Of flesh, blood and bones.
The fellows on returning saw the
four girls grouped close together
at the end Of the piano, but so
as to display the decoy
leg They picked up their ears
and opened their eyes very wide
The expression of admiration
gave place to nmazement, and
that to something like awe. Just
as they were about to burst with
as to whom the elephant
belonged to. the girls
walked demurely out of the room,
leaving the big and bogus leg be-
hind them. They have been
invited to a champaign break.
fast
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11
THE ONION IN Hlsroar.
It's Uses Among the Patricians OF
Rome and the Politicians OF
To-Day.


itf4ihia tnfVn'1te1
A Tuscarora paper Is nuthofity
for this nugget Of historical IN
formation: s.In olden times a
Roman Senator used TO shut him
self up for three days after eating
onions = The inference which
our esteemed contemporary would
draw is that the Roman Senator
had a more tender regard for the
feelings of bis constituents than
has the great man OF our day; for
the latter, it is declared, watts
himself out ON his onion laden
S0reath and opens up debate
with the first man he meets. The
inference is erroneous. Tacitus,
Dion Cassius, Suetonins, the
Roman historians, Dagnokonel,
Artagmakuyn and Tomphlin, the
erudite Greek writer's upon ethi-
cal topics of antiquity shows
clearly enough that the. Roman
practice Of self confinement after
i.doing the onion gag" las Pliny
terms it, was purely disciplinary
IA species Of Pagan penance,
highly recommended BY the ora
cles. The Roman who could
lock himself up alone in the
oniony atmosl here Of his own
cham Der for the period OF three
days was entitled to wear the
belt for nerve, Cesar hung on
to himself for a week on stretch
one time after cold onion lunch,
and the enthusiastic populace
wanted TO make him king on &C.
count Of it Mark Antony (Cur-
raD) refers to this in bis post.
mortem remarks over c., when be
says. "That day he osercame the
Neryii
The inoderns are not endowed
With tho steely nerve OF the anci-
ent Romans, and when an Ameri.
can Senator succumbs to the se-
ductive onion he rushes out into
the street not so much for the pur-
pose Of staggering an opponent in |
debate as for q sort Of fond desire
Ia desperate longing Ito get
away from himself. !.
Careful students of the explo- |
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

The Fat Woman Rides Aatrnde.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11
old 81 on Commissions.
ATLANTA Constitution.

thtiSfit1 Nvth,titAhivn.l
Old'Si had been careful read
er Of the reports about the Civil
Service &c mmission, and on Fri
day 4roke out on the subject:
"Dis ere country ar bein' run
by too many kummishuns ter suit
mel
"Why SOP"
"Kase cherry time dar's sumpin
ter be dun ives got ter git up or
kummishun. Oars de Lectoral
Kummishun, whar put de wrong
pig in de pen; de Tariff Kummis-
hun whar upset de rebbinuse,
took Oft de rich mans appetite
an put EN- on de poor mans
hungriDess, an now comes de
SibiI Servis Kummishun, and de
fast lick hit mecks for refarm hit
can't han'lo hits sword, but jes
hamstrings hitselfl"
Well, it did make a mistake,
but perhaps it will do better from
now on
"Mebbe so. butI'se got mighty
poor hopes on it. Yer see, mos
folks is 10 Tabor Of sibil sarvis,
pervided dey can do de sarvis-an
dey's in Tabor of refarm. pervided
bit don'thfarm dem outen er lob.
Hits like 'busin' de lottry for er
swin'le twell yer draws err prize
yerself den yer am willin' to
swear hits de best instush9n
sence Noah built his AK. OATS
humin natur all obrr and no
kummishun ar gwine ter refarm
it"
The old man went to sample
some bananas at the freight
depot.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

Take my own case I am a
Imilliner and / have made be-
tween 81 500 and $4,000 a year
lin my business for some time
past. married four years ago.
my husband is kind and good
BOOKING, but he never learned any
trade, had no profession and
eould not earn $500 q year. l
loved him, however. but / saw it
would not do to depend on him.
20 I kept on with my business.
After a time I think he got a
title lazy, aud as we were both
AWAY during the day we could
hot keep house and got sick OF
Boarding ] proposed that he
bhould keep house and / would
run the business and find the
money. We have now lived
Very happily for two years. Ny
husband gets up and builds the
ire, gets breakfast and leave al
;45 for my place OF business.
ae does the washing and ironing,
he cleaning. and I do not know
bf any woman who can beat hin.
he is neat as wax and can cook
Equal to any Of one in town.
hay be an isolated case. but
link the time has come When
tomen who have husbands ia
upport should make them dc
he work, otherwise they arc
uxuries we must do without
Letter TO The Boston Globe.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

An old negro passing along the
street stepped on torpedo ingen--
iously placed in his way by a boy.
When the thing exploded he
turned and said: "Huhl neber
see such town MS dis Da's
been tryin' ter blow me up cher
since / came heah. White folks
mus take me for the Gar Of Rus
STA. "-Arkansa,g Traveller.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11


There is no more ludicrous
spectacle in the world, says the
Yosemite correspondent OF the
Globe Democrdt, than a fat woman
sitting astride Of a horse, and on
some of these lofty trails I have
missed half the thrills and emo
tons that are set down in the
guide book by reason Of seeing
one Of these mounted females go
by. There was stout woman
here some days ago who was an
'indefatigabIe explorer, and every
morning and afternoon there were
tears and silent commissions Oh
the porch when the start and
return were made. The first day
in the Mexican saddle she chung
to the traditions OF her sex and
tried to envelor Der neither limbs
in mystery. To accomplish that
end she borrowed a gentleman's
linen buster, and tying the sleeves
around her waist, made some kind
Of Lady Habberton's divided
skirt arrangement Of the rest OF
the garment. She rode up the
trail in that style, but returning
she boldly put q foot into each
coat sleeve, and sat on her horse
like a brave cavalier. Another
day she experimental with a
gossamer water proof cloak, but
finally she let her own dress
skirts do duty as far as they
would, and her feet then stood
forth on their own merits. The
horses are steady and Of good
nerve, or they never could
stand some Of the sights that are
presented to them, and It is a
wonder sometimes that they dc
not shy and back over precipices
at sight Of the riders ahead q
them.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11
A Long Suffering Husband

A Long Suffering Husband =
|dr. Simeon b. Wrightleigh, an
Austin man. having. returned
homo unexpectedly from his
place of business. finds Mrs
sYrightleigh and his clerk sitting
together on the lounge, whereup-
in Mr.. Wrightleigh stamped
around and behaved so rudely
khat the clerk got mad and left
khe house, at which the exasper-
satsd husband vented his rage on
'bis unfortunate wife; "Now,
madame, that's the fifth or sixth
.time / have caught you sitting on
9tbe sofa with my clerk. I tell
'ycu now for the last time, il it
hsppeus again, I'll dock bis
!whges. - Texas Syflings
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11


southea md the West,
road etwe he
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

"What," said the landlady to
her visitor, "do you mean that
you have finished those three
bottles of port without any assist
ance?" The visitor was almost
too full for utterance, but he
managed to say, "No, madam, I
didn't do il alone, for / was as
sisted by bottle Of MADEIRA.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

"Good merning, Smith. How's
the grocery trader" "Slow-very
slow Lets see. How long
have you been in business?'
s'Seven years." "And how many
times have you failed?" "Never.
air." "AhI / see. Well I'll put
you down for a September fail
urer creditors accept ten per
cent; businesa removed to larger
aud more commodious quarters.
Mr.. Smith let me call your atten-
ton to $4,000 worth OF worthless
railroad, canal and bridge securi-
ties, which can lump you off at
SIS. They'll count you face
value in settling with creditors,
land show where your profits
went. Busy? Alb! III call again.
No trouble to show goodsl'
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

Walter Evans. o farmer near
Reading, Pennsylvania, who died
recently at the age Of ninety, had
lived ON that farm all his life,
never left it, and never saw a
railroad train.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-07-11

This Is purely botanical preparation, contain
circulation Of tho blood, tones up and strength
ems the system, promotes digestion, cures Consti
iation, arousss the Liver and Kidneys to healthy
action, aids nature to expel the impurities Of the
body. and the cure is performed. This medicine
cures all Fovsrs, rheumatism. Neuralgia, Kidney
Disease Psinsf the brsasf. side or back; piphthr
4 q, Group, Headache. Heart Disease, Asthma
Bronchitis, and the irst stages Of Consumption
Price. ssOo Per Kettle.