The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1883-02-09
GENERAL AND Personal.

state how many years she has been SO.
Ifit wasn't for the bellies good many peo-
pie would miss being church members.
The story of priest marrying nun cannot
be true. Is he not still unmarried man?
And now collins are sold on the installment
plan. The next thing in this line will be
''misfit caskets specially"
Senator Logan, of Illinois, has introduced a
bill to increase the pay of privates in our army
from $I3 to SIG per month.
There are oo7S stores in Chicago, 6o7I fac
tories and o3S mixed establishments. They
employ, all told, I66,676 persons.
In single Connecticut village there are 100
widows. Connecticut men don't appear to be
adapted to pforacted conversation.
Four death notices in an Ohio paper got
under the head of "Conhagrations." Ohio
papers are often accidentally accurate.
A young lady at Hartford city, Indiana,
committed suicide Wednesday last because
she, thought she was too young to marry.
The man who sued a Colorado paper for
$50, 600 damages for libel and was awarded
cents, now believes in the freedom of the
press.
OF Oscar Wilde's future plans the London
World says: ale goes to America in the
fall, then to Australia, and ultimately to
heaven"
Oliver Wendell Holres says there is
nothing in the world tenderer than the pity
that kind hearted young girl has for young
man who feels so lonely.
The Queen of Servia cannot play the piano,
nor embroider, nor paint, but she writes all
her husbands letters while he plays billiards.
Unfortunately she has no sisters.
There is a movement among the landlords
of leading hotels against polygoly bills of fare,
and it is proposed 10 begin simultaneously in a
number of houses to use plain English only.
According to George Alfred Townsend, in
the New York Tribune, it costs at least $780,
900 year to own residence and live in any
thing like style in the choicest positions on
Fifth avenue.
A man asked for admission to a show for
half price, as he had but one eye. But the
manager told him that it would take him
twice as long to see the show as it would any
body else, and charged him double.
AS matter of relief to his. customers, who
are compelled to use it, and of time saving to
himself in writing it, Mr.. John Dannighgen-
berger, shoemaker at Centralia, Ohio, has
asked the Legislature to change his name to
John Berger.
The Philadelphia Bulletin says: A squad
of New York policemen has had Great success
in an operate performance, singing a chorus
in The Pirates of Penzance in a superior man
ner. They are said to do better on the stage
than on the streets.
The English Postmaster General is totally
blind, and Mr.. George Richardson, who has
just been appointed Receiver and Accountant
General to the postoffce is totally deaf But
in the Admiralty there is an official who is
both deaf and dumb.
DR.. Marion Sims declares that Horace
Greeley suffered from "acute meningitis, or
cerebro-spinal meningitis" in his last illness,
and ''should no more have been sent to an
insane asylum for treatment than a typhoid
fever patient with delrium."
Speaking of the future of the temperance
issue, Beecher says he can't see how il can be
inforced by legislation. He says: "You
must first educate public sentiment on the sub
ject and then back it up with law" He thinks
local option the most practical plan.
The BRENNAN Banner holds Mark Twain
responsible for 'that school of humor which
is wholly without reverence or discretion, and
which holds that it is perfectly allowable to
turn somersaultS on his mother-in-law's grave
ifyou can only get somebody to look over the
fence and laugh"
A Providence woman, over 90 years of age,
always stands on the front platform of the car
with the driver, regardless of cold or storm,
talks horse like professional, and is greatly
offended if the driver stops the car to let her
off, preferring to show her agility by hopping
off like sPrightly boy.
A man at San Francisco masquerade dis
covered that the waiter was taking advantage
of the general inebriety to fill emptied bottles
with the remnants of champagne, and selling
them to the fuddled drinkers. He gave the
fellow whipping, and, on being next day
arraigned on charge of assault, was dis
charged by the magistrate with commenda-
ton.
Several retiring Congressman are making
arrangements to drop into "soft Jobs" when
their term expires. General Tom Young is
supposed to be booked for the Cincinnati col
lectorship, Russell Errett and w. S. Shallen-
berger are after the Pittsburg pension agency,
Charles G.. Williams, of Wisconsin. will plant
himself in Dakota land Office, and Mr.. Tor-
gensen, of Virginia, will expect to be similarly
provided for. There are others yet to hear