The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-05-17
Gbistlfs.


Iort vbo osa remember shsn The rs'
fvsie trial begss
-Tring 10 crowd 200 roses 10 sPrins
ispnssi four inches square 10 ~bsi 10 nah
tug f.riag msDiscs AZ The rniiliners
"A sanasy school boy. npoa beins
asled vhst made iiss Tower q Pisa lean,
replied Beosuse a the famine IN The
iand
y The editor cant ssofj 10 wear dia.
snond a the hrs, wsief. bot When u comes
90 paste. BE- takes The cake from The CON
,uaniir
Yes, Miss Frost. always wear glove.
81 sishi; they make Goes hands 10 sof.
Mis. Fros, "Ahi aud DO you sleep eth
ynnr hat nny'
Gen. Hsren complains thai congress
made nc appropriation Tor cyclone reports
;hi. resr We shall probably bsre 10 do
without our cyclones
The Western chsp Who applied for .
divorce from his vile on the ground that
she vas talking him in,o bis grave. ss,d
he isli under continual senscoce ~ death
"A scientist saws that discord strnck
v,alenily IN piarn will kill . lizard.
The, usr ~. isn, EVERYONE 10 not good pi
unl.' enough 10 make Iiscori on piano.
"A jackson caaatv milkmsn. while
wn,kise ihe pnmp handle. calls ont
.H'id there 80. l.ns-l 50. there. nowl'
II iss vsy he has ~ easing his conscience.
Well" said an artist, there's one
thing csn ssv nv painting Is original.
Nohqlv cen accuse me OF copying" mot
even nature, remarked one Of his hear.
srs
Yes, said the level headed school.
bov. II an At the foot OF my class aud I
mean 10 stay there. Then don't have to
stand the wear and tear Of anxiety for fear
I'll lose NV place"
1t was Darling George when bri.
dial couple left Omaha: II was Dear
George" at Chicago; at Detroit it was
George, and when they reached Niagara
Falls IL vas Say youl'
Now that ostrich eggs have got down
10 500 apiece and new Bermuda potatoes
are almost as cheap. there is no reason
why people in moderate circumstances
.IwNII mol IL. fnrtabta
In lecture the other evening Bur.
de,te said: Speaking OF the telephone,
one hundred years ago II would hare been
considered an invention OF the deyil-and
sometimes think IL is now"
"A young lover in Iowa paid $40 for =
locomotive 10 run thirty five miles TO see
his girl, and when be got there the family
bulldog ran him two miles and didn't
charge HIM cent Corporations have no
souls.
~ suppose you have heard Of our
dudes, Miss Clarwag" observed New
York swell TO Jacksonville girl "Oh,
yes" she answered, they are becoming
quite popular ia Florida. We use them
for alligator bait. T"
"A Georgia man recently walked on the
shsdow Of lamppost fifty yards, uuder
the impression that IL was u sill to bridge. |
Why is il that the stad and innocent
lamppost always plays 80 large part in
the vagaries OF imaginative latch key men?
--"You seem to feel down hearted to.
day Denuis. said his employer. "What
is the matter with your" "lt's sore dis
tressed am. sir. Felix Maguire's conniv.
ia daughter has run of wild me by Mick.
10 aud there's no one left TO comfort me in
me ould age. ITS very sad. Dennis.
Yes sor; IT'S an eclipse Of the sun.
A scissors grinder was ringing his
hell ito grind" on Bush street, when
young man called to him and asked: "Csn
you sharpen eyerythinga" Eyes. efery.
tings." Can you sharpen my witsr
"Yoar vi.s' Well. guess you have to go
und A.. new handle ind back spring
put ia firs,l must baf something's TO hang
on py."
We are going TO have some amateur
thcAtricAls for the benefit OF our society"
said Brown. DO you think that Biggs
would take part il il was offered himf"
"Bigg. take partl' exclaimed Fogg
Guess you don't know Bigsa No sir;
he wouldn't take part. He'd lake thu
whole. or nothing. No half way about
Biggs."
"A COW living near Syracuse was run
over by a railroad train, aud uninjured,
except thai one hiud leg was cut of below
the knee. Her osner. skilful surgeon,
smpu,atci the limb at the knee joint and
bcaI.d the wouud and now the COW stumps
along very comfortably Oh a wooden leg.
II bother. her little. though, to make
good sho, at milk pail
--"f.iher said JOHNNIE. .'this paper
says That many prominent citizens are nov
III xiili Pneumonia aud kindred diseases
What is a kindred diseasef" Why, my
sou. saii Saith, "a kindred disease is-
IL Why yes. yes, kindred disease is
Que ti,st runs ,hrongi sn entire family
kindred, nela,is,s, You know Surprised
yon d,dn'i kisn. that. Johnnie.
-Someiimes the easiest things suppos-
I'll, prove the most difficult A couniry
,lrrs, msn Who recently visited the police
headquarters 10 Brookl,n can testify TO
Inc truth Of this fact d ing DESTROYS Of
'erins the rogues gallery he seemed TO be
greatly satisfied With . frame contain
ng photographs bus,s Of the police cap