Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1883-03-31
THE ART OF LYING II BED.

THE AIT OF LYING II BED.
One of the most useful, yet neglected, of
all the arts. says the Cincinnati En-
quirer, is that of lying in bed. The
damage that is done by persons getting up
is past all reckoning. All the mischief and
crime, the counterfeiting and forgery, the
murder and theft are perpetrated by par
ties who persist in getting up. Net only
individuals do wrong by leaving their beds,
but rivers as we'll do an immense amount
of damage. Witness the Ohio river, which
left its bed few weeks since. How much
damage has its diversion wrought! What
an immense, incalculabie amount of work,
labor and experience has not its early ris-
ing caused What man was ever dunned
by q creditor, had his eye put in mourning
by too close proximity with some ones
fist, broke his leg on slippery pavement,
was run over by an omnibus, who lay In
bed?
What great achievements have been ac-
complished in war, in poetry, in literature,
by genius abed! What noble thoughts
have been born between the sheets, and,
once delivered from their authors brains,
gone, Jehu.ike, whistling down the race
course of time! looming events cast their
shadows before one of the most memoir.
able lines in the English language-origin.
ated with the gin. loving poet, Tom Camp
bell, one morning before he had risen.
Longfellow thoughtout that exquisite poem.
"The Wreck of the Hesperus," after he
had retired. Ben Franklin said, Early
to bed and early to rise makes man
healthy, wealthy and wise." Now, Frank
lin started out all right, but got terribly
mixed when he said "early to rise." There
is the fatal mistake. People who rise early
are sure to catch the malaria the ground
is full of half-hatched poisonous germs
the sun is not up and has not warmed them
into life, given them wings and set them
adrift. Poor, misguided man, he arises,
inhales them all /; they fructify and poison
his entire system hence chills, fever, ma.
laria and half the ills that human flesh il
heir to.
Rise before the sun,
And make breakfast of the morning dew,
Served up by nature on some grassy hill
You'll find it nectar.
Was ever more arrant nonsense written
Fancy man getting up on cold. lainy
morning and climbing one of the high hills
about Cincinnati on an empty stomach,
and leaving his French coffee and hot rolls,
poached eggs and oyster stew, to eat
what? Why, dew. How long would that
fellow last Wouldn't he be fit candi-
date for Longview, and no questions asked
But, the early bird catches the worm.
Yes, but the sharp boy knocked that delu-
sion in the head forever and eternally when
he said Father, there's the point /;
what in thunder did the worm get up so
early for?" He trifed with destiny he
tempted fate; he should not have done it.
That boy was benefactor to the human
race. He was sound on the lie-abed sues-
ton.
The French proverb says De lit a Ia
table. de la table an lit -"from bed to grub,
from grub to bed" That's something like
it. Get up and eat, eat and go to bed
again. Why not? All the animals do it.
All nature, the grandmother of us all,
teaches it. Every animal in the world eats
and seeks repose. The COW eats and,
lying down, placidly chews her cud the
anaconda swallows an OK, horns and all,
and goes to sleep" sleep that knits up
the raveled sleeve of care; the birth Of
each days life, sore labor's bath, balm Of
hurt minds great natures second course
chief nourisher in lifes FEAST" And We.
this is what they would deprive us of who
say get up, and who oppose the art of lying
abed.
A Spanish Minister, suddenly raised tc
power, signalized the event by going tc
bed and staying there for fear he might
have something to do. 1t was in bed, al
the little inn at Waterloo, that the Duke
of Wellington received the list of the terri
BILE casualties of the fatal 18th of June
Gray's "Ode to Music" was written il
bed, and Sam Johnson's Lobo's Voyage
to Abyssinia was dictated to the printer:
before the great author of the Lives o.
the Poets and photographer had arisen
Peter Pindar (Dr. Velocity was so fond Of
lying abed that he received his visitors ly
ing beneath spreads and counterpanes
Rossini wrote one Of his finest operas il
bed, and was too lazy to pick up sheet
that had fallen away. George ~. lay IL
bed to read the newspaper, and Macaulay
read twenty pages of Schiller before get
ting up. John Foster thought out his ser.
mon in bed, and the methodical Anthony
Trollope used to read an hour before going
to bed. Cynical Pope wrote:
wake at night,
Fools come into my head and so write.
Mrs. Macbeth strikes the keynote when
she shouts, "To bed to bed p People
hunt the world over for pleasure, indulge
in all sorts of mad pranks in their search
for recreation and repose, roam from the
North Pole to the Southern Cross, pene-
trate African jungles and freeze with Sibe.
rians and Laplanders, climb the Alps,
swelter at Saratoga and Long Branch in
pursuit of pleasure. Alas they seek hap.
piness where it is not and neglect it where
it is-in bed.
Never get up! It's the secret of glory;
Nothing so true can philosophy preach;
Think Of the names that are famous in story
Never get up is the lesson they teach.
How have men compassed immortal achievements
How have they nodded the world to their will
lis that mid sorrows and threats and bereavemeDts,