Saturday press. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1880-1885, 1883-04-07


veal.
Abou Ben Gibson-may his Hocks increase.
Awoke one night from deep dream Of fleece:
And saw within the moonights magic glass
An angel writing in book Of brass.
Ben Gibson pueked the angel by the sleeve
And softly murnured: SANITY SIR grieye
10 know the thing you write in your big book"
Compassion fingered in the Seraphs look
And in his eye there lurked furtive weep;
'" write the names Of those who shear my sheep"
nhe IN, angel answered Then sheepish grin
Played hide and seek around Ben Gibson's chin.
" All. sanity sir, for only this sigh,
Lived e er that sort Of shepherd on Lanai?"
The seraph opened wide his wondrous eyes
Sweet sir, Ben Gibson pastures there, and r."
Then Abou stayed the Seraphm's reply,
Saying " | pray you let me look therein"
The bazen volume opened with loud din,
And on the first leaf, dull with age and dun,
Abou Ben Gibson's name number one
There are two ways of looking at the usual
practical joker. To one class he is merry
fellow, bubbling with fun and frolic, and l-ap-
preciated by selfish world that prefers its own
peace and quietness, too dull to like being
'sold" and too morose tamely to put up with
personal ndignity and kindred pleasantries.
TO the other class he is simply fat-witted buff
foon, sans kindiness, sans manliness, sans sense;
his stock in trade, vulgar lie or an obscene
"catch;" his appreciation of joke confined
to his enjoyment of some one else's discomfort;
his social value indicated by the symbol of a
goose egg. Perhaps the more charitable view
may be found in assuming that the average
practical joker is either "not such fool as he
looks, or else "does not look to be such fool
as he is" "All Fools Day" is the grand oppor-
tunity Of the practical joker. Fortunately, the
first of April comes but once year. Unhap
PLY, on that day the foo-killer is invariably
asleep.
The following epigram has been sent US for
publication
Who pass in yon equpage fine?
His Majestys ministers nine:
Gibby and Presto and Bush,
Three solid saints Of great push.
Presto and Bushv and Glib,
| Three orators splendidly glib
! Bushy and Gibby and Prest,
Three wise of the west.
And these, by the favor Of fate,
| Are the nine noble pillars of state"
Its chief demerit is the inaccuracy Of its
arithmetic. In enumerating the Cabinet Of.
hcials it fails to include the Minister of FL
nance. That amiable incompetent must not
be allowed to shirk his fair share of resposi-
bility for existing misrule. Then, too, the
exaggeration Of three bad ministers into nine
seems less striking than the more popular esti-
mate, which makes the ability, integrity and
resPectability of the present Cabinet rather
less than one-horse power.
Our dimunutive though energetic contemp-
orary, the Bnilt.in, has every moral and legal
right to conduct its own business as it sees fit.
Yet, being subscribers, we have Just this OBJ.
lection to its present conduct: The quality OF
paper it uses is so poor that it can not we'll be
bound, or preserved in any manner except
wrapping in flannel and putting in an ar.tght
chest. Posterity needs to preserve its opinions,
and, in the interests of posteri,y, we trust a
better quality of paper will be granted US.
| go
The Bulletin says that the Fort Street Church
| is too small to accommodate its Sunday even.
ing congregations, and suggests that its trus-
tees erect larger building. Possibly it might
be better for the trustees Of the Bethel to pro.
vide for Sunday evening services in that church.
New buildings are expensive luxuries, and even
Mr.. Cruzan's admitted eloquence would prove
an unsatisfactory opiate for the nightmare Of a
big debt.
The BmLiffiN Of last Monday had CORE.
spondent having money to invest, and afflicted
because he couldn't quite make up his mind
how best to invest il. "Stranger,n as he signs
himself, finds everything rose.lined here.
Among other beatifc conditions he finds .
"the government actively and intelligentiy
employed in carrying out the provisions Of
liberal legislature; and in every way preserv-
ING and protecting national welfare. -"
II we knew G. Carson Kenyon less WELL we
might be led to believe that astute, careful and
powerful editor had received valentine re.
served for All Fools Day.
"Censure, says eminent writer, sis the tar a
pays TO the public for being eminent II Is folly
fos an eminent man to think q escaping H. and weak
To be aGesed with IT, There no defence against
sspso.eh eus obseuriy' by no,eing the opposition
blustes Of Contemporaries the truth o thssr words
v,ll Be found ioreibly illustrated. dat,fiss,,
| osh inst
g Hos troubled is the calm content
With which walk the nanow way
How heavy Is ths ,as pay.
For being than eminent =
wAlrRs MvsHAy GiAsos.
.n.,,' sa. d:erss, and able @ssn.ssm.a' Of pub
I. me and myself
Make this administration.
take in the p<l.
Myself and the nation
'ManAgemens, discreet and sbls,
Is shaf has made this nation stable"
W. ". G, Premier.
The "galled jade" WINGED with conspicuous
sensitiveness last "Wednesday. Thus saith the
osgan; The sowing of dissen-
sion and the habit Of permitting political an.
tagonism to dictate marrow, iliberal tone TO
social intercourse, and more especially to frs.
tivities and parties, are alike unworthy and an
tiquated- ." "Antiquated." perhaps;
"unwosthy." no. The return TO 6zs, psinci-
pies IN refusing 10 associate with men sho have
been psoven diahoaess l. one of the h<sl,hies,
sigps d lhr iins< II the viih<u os The