The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1883-10-09
" But what am I to eat for breakfast ?:''
Oawailad TTDclo Rlock

But what am I to eat for breakfast o''
bewailed Uncle Black
Crackers, of course" said Joscelind.
"Anything is better than imperiling ones
digestion with such stuff as this And
Betty, if you send up any more fish in
month you may consider yourself dis
charged-do you hear?''
But, my dear, l am rather fond of
fish, put in the old gentleman.
One can't eat fish the whole time
said .Joscelind, imperiously. Here
Betty-this coffee isn't fit to drink. and
the toast is burned and you must have
put the cooking butter on the table by
mistake! Let these errors be rectifed at
once"
Betty retired with an ominous rustic
of her stiffiy starched apron.
"Mv DEAR" said Uncle Black appre-
hensively. Betty is very old servant,
and"
81 don't care if she is the age of Me
thuselah," said Josceind; "nobody can
be expected to put up with such wretched
cookery as this ~ ,sss
g really think she Is not so bad, if
ooh pray don't apologize for her, Tn
Gle Black ~ said Joscelind. "Thev are
all shittless, lazy creatures. who must be
discharged promptly if they don't do their
duties"
Uncle Black began to look frightened.
He had kept Betty, Sylvia and old John
for ten years Was it possible that he
had scOlded at them for ten years, only to
now.
81 wouldn't be short with 'em, my
dear, if were you," he demonstrated
8 Then let them do their duty said
.Ioscelind, with the air of an empress.
eve are all mortal" pleaded Uncle
Black
Il expect every one around me to live
up to their conditions" said .Joscelind
Uncle Black ate the rest Of his break
fast with but little appetite Sylvia, the
housemaid, was finishing dusting his
library as he entered it,
Not through yet" growled Uncle
Black, the fretwork of wrinkles once more
coming into his brow
SYLVIA said Miss Darkridge, Sc
verely, " if this happens again, | shall
dispense with your services Look at
that clock Is this the time of day to be
dawdling about the rooms with broom
and a duster: Remember Mr.. Black
does not pay eXorbltant wages to lie in
bed until noon :"
My DEAR said Uncle Black, "Sylvia
is generally very good girl, if
Dear Uncle interrupted .Joscelind,
pray permit me to be the Judge Of these
matters. You have ruled your household
with slack and indulgent hand alto
gether too long | shall now institute
REFORM
And poor Sylvia had never moved
about briskly as she did that day.
Old John, the gardener, was not ex-
empt from his share of the general tur-
moil. Miss Darkridge CHANGED to hear
her uncle reproaching the old man for
some fancied neglect in the hower-beds,
whose diamonds, ovals and crescents Of
brilliant colOrs were the pride OF his hOr
ticultural heart, and she promptly came
to his aid.
Gardening, indeed! Do you call this
gardening?' she said. " Uncle Black,
I'm astonished that you keep such man
as this about the place"
And the torrent of taunts and re-
proaches which she showered upon the
luCkleSS Hedu vi pOOI Olu cOuH was
enough, as that individual observed, "to
make ones flesh creep"
My niece is young lady of spirit and
energy" apologized Mr.. Black, when at
length Joscelind had gone back to the
house.
Vera like you, sir, vera like you"'
said old John, scratching his head
Like me - said Mr. Black, slowly.
And he stood full FIVE minutes, quite
speechless and motionless, staring at the
messy rim of an ancient sun-dial half sunk
in the velvetY grass. And at the end OF
five minutes he spoke two other words,
and only two:
Like-me -
"Theres no KNOWN the mashter, he's
that changed" said Betty in the kitchen
a week or two after He's as mild as a
lamb and as peaceabbe as kitten"
Sure, isn't that what the young lady
told u.s. said Sylvia, "when she came
down into the kitchen that first morning
after the fire was lighted, and told us she
was goin' to try an experiment, and we
wasn't TO mind a word she said, cause it
was all by contraries. He don't know
what his temper has got to be- said she,
and I'm going to show him. And, bless
her sweet heart, her plan has worked like
a charm"
1t had, in good truth. Uncle Black
was changed man. And Joscelind had
relapsed into the original sunshine of her
temper-and all the domestic wheels of
Black Grange seemed to revolve on vel
vet.
But Uncle Black took all the credit to
himself He never knew that Joscelind
had taught him lesson.
"We can get along very nicely" said
he, "now that my niece has subdued
those little tempers of hers.'
And Joscelind was his heiress and darl
ing after all-for he will always believe
that it was he "who formed her charac-
ter"
San Francisco ost.l
THE PATENT CALUMNIATOR.
Old Major Snodgrass was nominated