The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1883-10-16

Alaska girls nave trick OF cutting
button holes in their upper lips. But no
Alaska man has yet had the nerve to sew
button on his wife's lower lip.
"A gold idol weighing s2} pounds
was recently excavated in Mexico. The
Montezamas were just like the rest of US,
it seems. Made idols of their gold
Hartford Post.
|: An Albany, N. Y, newspaper tells
'ot woman of that city who woke her
husband during storm and said "I do
wish yoa would stop snoring, for 1 want
to hear it thunder"
-illiteracy has increased in Maine,
New Hampshire, Nevada and California,
and decreased in Georgia, Mississippi,
|. North Carolina, Tennessee and Virginia
within the past ten years.
|: &c can marry any girl please" he
said, with self-satisfed expression of
.countenance. No doubt" she re-
'sponded sarcastically; "but what girl
do you please?" They don't speak now.
|: The suds from the wash-tubs cannot
:be put to better use than to be poured
:about newly-planted fruit trees and
vines 1t will often literally save their
lives, and under any circumstances is q
valuable fertilizer
T. -" H. there anything wrong in kiss
ing ?" he asked her, as they stood to-
gether a; the garden gate "Certainly
there is. she briskly replied then slowly
and softly added, after pause, " if there's
any one looking"
=" | say, Paddy, that is the worst
looking horse that have ever seen in
harness Why don't you fatten him
np?' " Fatten him up, is it? Faix, the
poor baste can scarcely carry the little
mate that's on him now," replied Paddy.
The speaker who alluded to his can
d'date aS " the war horse that snuffed the
battle from atar" climbed up to the COM
p"sit ION room with a club alter reading it
an the paper " the ward boss that snatched
the bottle from bar - Boston CONNER
rial B"Uetin
1--we little girls were saying their
prayers prior to being tucked in for the
night When both had finished, the
younger of the two climbed on her moth
ers knee and said, in confidential but
triumphant whisper, Mother, Clara only
asked for her daily bread asked for
bread and milk"
1t ls a celebrated thought of Socrates,
II at if all the misfortunes of mankind
were cast into public stock, in order to
be equally distributed among the whole
species, those who now think themselves
the most unhappy would prefer the share
they are already possessed of before that
which would fall to them by such divis-
ion 191dison
A pretentious person said to the
leading man of a country village, How
would lecture by me on Mount Vesu-
vlus suit the inhabitants of your village %
" Very well, sir; very we'll indeed he
answered.; ga lecture by you on Mount
Fesuvina would suit them great deal
better than lecture bv you in this vii
lags. San Francisco Ne,cs Letter.
1t Is related that not long ago John
: Bright attended an auction sale of high
priced Short Horn cattle in England, and
lin response to an inquiry, said, " No, /
thave pot come to buy, but to see the fool
who will pay $4,000 for bull" "There
he is. said Lady Skelmersdale, promptly.
pointing to her husband The reply made
by the Peoples Tribune is not a matter of
rt cord.
The trouble with most of the girls ia
they are in too big hurry to get mar
ried. When they get through the school
or college they begin to look around for
a leller, and as fellers of the right sort
are scarce, they kill time for a year or
two apd then mate with somebody they
don't want exactly, and the union is not
happy. A girl had better not marry at
all than to marry badly.-BiH Arp.
On the other side of the street there
may be some poor soul whom all the
town shuns as vagabond, who since his
birth has fought desperately and some
times ln vain against inherited weaknesses,
levers in the blood and brain, which drive
him to idleness, rags, hunger, crime God
knows the man, though we turn our backs
upon him. 1t is not the pride of place,
OF righteous well doing, of spotless gar
ments, that never were tempted into the
mire, he honors; it is the man who has
fought faithfully against the heavier odds.
Many a poor, despised wretch, forced
INTO pauper's grave by circumstance or
some faint of blood, has heard the words,
o Well done, good and faithful servant"
" J.. Tribune.