Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1883-11-15
HERE And THERE,

'oA5oys-E1.
1t is the engaging girl who becomes the
soonest engaged.
Hartford Courant, aged 119. 1t ia the
Susan b. Anthony of journalism.-B Boston
Post.
Do clothes make the manf My son,
they do. They make him mighty bsshful
of his tailor.--RaYkeye.
Where ia the man who invented poll
tics We'd like to back him against
Sullivan, and loss.--Looeii Citizen.
Martin Fsrquhsr Upper thinks men
will yet be able to fly. They will W ant to If
upper writes any more poetry.-Milton
Nsos.
eyes, my wife.is good poker player !"
says Long Island farmer and then
ne added "She, ia also just as handy
with the longs"
The young lady who made 700 words
of conservatory" last fall has run away
from home. Her mother wanted her to
make three loaves of bread out of flour.
The Car draws pay as a Russian
colonel. The Kentucky colonel serves for
nothing. Such is the difference between
despot and a patfiot.-LouisvilieC Courier
Journal.
John Goekel of Baltimore, recently
sneezed SO hard that he dislocated his
shoulder. What stumped him was
whether to feei proud or ashamed .-Bos-
ton Post
Mamma" said the little inauisitiye
boy, what makes kitty always eat the
mouse's head first Amt it 80 the monse
can see where he's going H"--Merchant
Traveller.
Hold this before your girl as solemn
warning. A l6 year old girl at New.
comerstown, Ohio, died the other day
from eating ice cream and oysters. oil
City Derrick.
Yes" he said, "I'll get even with
that postmaster. I'll write mysterious
postal card to somebody in the village
and let him lie awake thinking about
what it meant. "-Boston Post.
The high school girl heard Amy remark
yesterday, "oh, keep still you make me
tired" And she promptly informed her
that she should say, "Desist you
fatigue me."-0a City Derrick.
From the first to the last" saws
Anthony Trollope in his autobiography
There was nothing satisfactory in my
school career except the way in which |
licked the boy who had to be taken home
to be cured''
Cat inkstands, made of china, are
something new. Lift up the cats head
and there's your ink. There's something
pleasant about the thing it's always SO
agreeable to yank cats head off,
Boston Post.
Brooklyn school teacher spanked a
pupil, and now the pupils father wants
$3,O0O damage. The chances are that it
would be money in his pocket to pay the
teacher IS, 600 to spank the boy again.
Hartford Post.
Long Branch is said to be the oldest
settlement in northern New Jersey, and it
has church built in Queen Anne's time.
You see church at Long Branch is used
so little that it doesn't get worn out and
lasts long time.-Boston Post.
William Andrews, an old farmer living
in the suburbs of Saoo, Me-, has in his
cellar nearly SO barrels OF wine. He will
not drink 1t, sell it, give it away, or
throw it away. Somebody'll have some
fun when he's desd.-Boston Post.
An aged physician who practiced much
among the ladies', made large fortune.
IL was his custom to say to every femi-
nine patient, "Show me your tongue.
honey There, that will do, dear You
Will be well in a week, thank God, my
| dear"
magazine writer asks, "How shall
VS. ntilize the IndiansY ?" This is a diff.
In lrf
best plan would be to pe.rify them and
sell them for cigar store signs This idea
Is worthy of consideration, anyhow -
Aorristopn Herald.
No, don't 60 with that girl now I"
said Marathon youth in answer to a
friends inquiry. What's the matter I
Did your suit meet with reverses 2'
keyerses! Gosh, | guess it did Hsr
old man stood me on my head twice. -
Narration Independent
The Lowell Citizen says 1.-THE manager
OF the American exchange in London re-.
ports that l3O, 600 American tourists have
visited Europe this year. II is safe to
assume that l2S 900 made fools of them
selves in some way" This is letting the
other 200 down very easy boston Post.
A Hartford intelligence office ADVERTISED
in one OF the evening papers for "two
young ladies, not afraid to talk fonr
hours day, at 81 an hour" This ia
singularly superfuous. An advertise
ment for two young ladies would have
covered the whole ground---New York
Graphic.
"You could tell at glance thar that
butter wasn't old" said Jones to his
landlady. "of course, it isn't, sir" she
replied, much pleased; 'but how can you
tell, sir 7" why, can see that 1t isn't
bald yet, he answered softly, and for 10
minutes nausht broke the silence save
the exclamations OF fly in the milk
pitcher, who was unable to swim. Life.
~ thought" said the senior Bagples,
as he produced suspicious looking fist
bottle from his sons valise, that there
was nothing but your surgical instru-
ments in this bag" CHATS what [
said "Then, sir, what do you cali
this ~ THAT Oh, that's my eye
opensr, dad very useful instrument
very usetul-indispepsable, assure
you !''-Boston Iranscript.
Here, waiter 70 exclaimed Smith
what do you mean by giving me dirty
napkin ~ The waiter took away he
soiled napkin and gave Smith a clean
one, murmuring as he walked away.
well, if that amt the most particular
man ever saw. That napkin has been
used by no less than dozen men ard
he's the first one to make any COM
plant. "-Boston Transcript
A victorious defeat Miss Belle
Fisher 81 cannot tell you how
sorry | am | never suspected for a
moment that" Young Jameson, from
Indians ooh that's all right; dom.
let that worry you. Why, Miss Fisher,
have beel refused by nine girls in one
summer | pop it to EN- before they
are ready--they, of course, say no, but
generally in way that might mean YES
later" Miss B. F: "Thst ia not the
case this time, assure you" Young ] ::
Oh, that's what they always say, aud |
pretended to take it au serieux Gives
me time to think it over, You know Isn't
this glorious afternoon. -Lits.
Six sturdy aud rather plainly dressed
men stood at the corner of Wall and Nav
streets the other noon talking OF the
weather, the crops and prices. They
wore stove pipe hsts, degrees or two out
Of fashion, clothes that had seen wear.
and ooots without polish. On the oopo-
site side stood six Young mel resplendent
IN the tip Of style. jewelry, canes and
cigarettes, talking about the ladies
That passed. The first six we're reprssen.
LatlVe citizens, and represented
s2o, 900, 600; the six were dudes, and,
outside OF tlsir wearing apparel hadn't