The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-08-31

Saving Life Under Most Extraordinar,
circumstances.

Saving Life Under Most Extraordinary
Circumstances.
Three noble heroes of the late war
met in Louisville, KY, and held little
reunion, all by themselves. Col. Watts
led off with blood-curdling tale of his
narrow escape from horrible fate.
1T was just before the battle of Shi-
Sh," said the Colonel, when was en-
gagged carrying dispatches from our
division to another located about 100
miles south of us. Every precaution
had been taken to head off all communi-
cation, and the greatest care had to be
exercised in keeping dispatches and the
like secreted, so that in case of the car
rier being captured nothing of tell
tale nature could be found upon him.
When ] entered the scouting service 1
had four of my front teeth knocked out
and had them replaced by false ones.
These were followed out behind and
admitted of a good-sized message being
secreted therein.
"On the trip that started out to tell
about, l had my dispatch secreted as
usual, and was riding along very peace
fully In the disguise of farmer going
to the mill, when was suddenly sur
prised by the enemy. 1 pretended to
be very much enraged at them making
me their prisoner, but there was no
getting out of it, for they had kinder
dropped on me. They proceeded to
search me and compelled me to take of
every stitch of clothing. These they
ripped up into ribbons, but of course
they found nothing and l was beginning
to feel safe, when, standing before them
there, perfectly nude, one of the fellows
stepped up to me and slapping me on
the back, said:
"'Ain't he fat? He'd make good
beef
"The slap was SO vigorous that out
popped my false teeth. That settled
it. The Jig was up and began con-
templating my fate. Seventeen men
jumped for those false teeth at the
same time, and it didn't take long for
them to find the dispatch, which read
Send us 10000 men at once
$50 you were on your way for rein
forcements, were you?' said big, red
nosed Captain, sneeringly. Well,
we'll just help you along on your Jour-
ney. Bring up that mortar
Great heavens thought /, they GER
tainly don't intend to blow me to pieces.
The mortar was brought up and
planted and pointed in the direction in
which had been travelling.
Double-charge her and stick this
fellow in head first, said the Captain.
They double-charged her and then
forced me in head first. Vivid recol-
lections of everything mean that 1 had
ever done in my life fitted across my
mind, and, boys, L actually prayed.
But while 1 prayed l felt them ram
ming the charge home, and l concluded
that my prayers were of no avail.
Il smelled the powder right in front
of me, and happy thought struck me.
Something told me to eat the powder
and / began on it. At every jam OF
the ramrod swallowed an extra-sized
mouthful, and when the rammine
ceased L could see daylight through the
touch-hole. A fuse was inserted and
touched off, and no doubt the fends re
treated to safe distance to watch my
flight into Alabama. L heard the fuse
sizzling as the fire drew near me, but
felt safe, for not grain of powder haC
/ left lying around loose. The fuse
went out with q sudden squirt, and
felt that my life had been saved. Thu
would-be murderers couldn't under
stand why the gun missed fire, and the,
began drawing the charge to see wha
allied her. Just about the time the,
got me out a lot of our cavalry charged
upon them and was saved; but, boys
1 can taste that saltpeter and sulphu
to this day."