Morning journal and courier., 1883-08-31
LAST WORDS.

When Eogg was asked regarding the latest additions to the English language. he said he would ask his wife. She always had the last l word.-Boston Teapot.
 hoarder at Kennebunkport writes us that slae went to the circulating library and asked if they had the "Letters of Jane Welsh Carlyle" and received the reply, "You will get 'ena At the postofdce. ."-Boston Tran script.
 sI say, Paddy, that is the worse looking horse that have ever seen in the harness Why don't you fatten him up?" Eat him up, is 1t ? Faix the poor baste can scarcely carry the little mate that's on him new, replisd Paddy.
 What Well, now look at this :: 'tEx- Governor St. John, of Kansas, is thought to be the worst fisherman in the country" Just think of it man who has held high official position poor fisherman Never heard of such thing.-Citizen.
 Emperor William is said to have very ex- tepesive wardrobe, some of the articles hay ing been in his possession and use twenty five years. The Emperor's wife is very diff fe rent from other women, or else plaster of Aris image vendors never call with busts of Napoleon and Bismarck which they offer to exchange for secondhand clothing. .-Norris- . town Herald.
 Ingratiating photographer (after carefully posing little Violo1: ''And now you are going to D6 6 very BOOU 11It1o 8uu blb a8 &S a mouse for a few minutes" Violo (who, though mite, has a mighty will of her own, quickly imposing and assuming a most de- termined expression): stOh, indeed, MT. Man That's all you know about it. I'm going to be as naughty as possible"
 An Arkansas editor, upon retiring from the control of an influential journal, said regret. We are glad to go. We shave not received due patronage from this town, consequently we are pleased to throw up the journalistic sponge. It is the custom for editors to say that they part with their contemporaries glad to quit. We have been branded as thief, and it has been proven that we are thief, consequently we have no regrets at parting. Those who owe us are expected to settle at their earliest convenience. Those whom we owe must ait."-Trayeller.
 Katharine Bates wants to know, in gen. eral way:
 "But how shall my song set free
 From the .himmeIing eells os my ocean pearl
 Ifyou care for our advice, Katharine, we say, don't do 1t. Not by no manner of means. If you have the music that hauAts the sea shut up in the shimmering cells of an ocean pearl, you keep it there. Don't let it out for anything. You hold on to it for rise. And the rise will come, if you're a pretty bad sailor. about the time you pass outside of Sandy Hook. A person who has the music that haunts the sea shut up in the shimmering cells of an ocean pearl owes 8 solemn duty to humanity to keep it there. It is awful music. We heard it once when it was shut up to certain ex- tent in the shimmering cells of an after state- room close over the screw and we never want to hear it again. It was dreadful. And if Katharine has really any thought of setting it free, now that she has it shut up in shim- mering cells, the people who are thinking of going to Europe next summer ought to form a syndicate and buy the pearl of her and then deposit 1t in Newark bank where mo- body would ever see it again.-Robert J. Burdette.
 A youth went out to serensde
 The lady whom he loved best,
 And passed beneath the mansions shade
 Where erBt her chamber used to rest.
 He warbled till the morning light Game dancing OCT the hin-to rim,
 But no fair maiden blessed his sight,
 And all seemed dark and drear to him
 With heart ag1ow and eyes ablaze
 l He drow much nesrcr than before, Z" When to his horror and amaze, @ :" He saw t'To Let" upon the door,
 Youths Companion.