Kimball enterprise. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1883, 1883-07-27
THE sQUIRE'S FUN.


red it at some one else's expense.
If he could play a trick upon one OF
his sons, he enjoyed it hugely, AS a
consequence, the boys did not reverence
him very much, and were always try ing
some practical joke upon their father.
Sometimes they succeeded, but not often.
"I'm too old a fish to be caught by the
pin-hooks of boys" he would say, when
some plan of theirs had miscarried and
the joke was turned upon themselves,
much to his delight and their chagrin.
"You've heard Of weasels, haven't youi
Yes? Well, weasels, especially old wes-
sells, never Sleep
1--WE must get laugh against him in
some way" said Tom. "He's too pro-
voking! I'D give a dollar to trick him in
such way that he wouldn't like to hear
about it,"
$50 would l." said John.
And I'd make it two. "said Robert.
"But we are hardly sharp enough.
That's the trouble"
1t happened that the squire was in
the hay NOW in the barn when this con-
versation took place, and the boys were
sitting on some boxes on the barn floor.
He chuckled as he listened. and mo-
ment later called out from his lofty perch,
"PlI tell you what III do, boys. When
you get good Joke on me, IN buy each
one OF you hat"
The boys looked foolish. But finally,
because they had nothing else to say,
they accepted the challenge. and in a
half-hearted sort of a way, set their wits
to work to earn, the hats.
1S nf c1n
old ram called David. The animal had
a chronic spite against the whole human
family. and never lost an opportunity of
exhibiting it to any individual of the
family that crossed his path. If stran-
ger entered the yard or pasture where
David was, the poor man was fortunate
If he was not knocked down as suddenly
as if he had been struck by lightning.
The ram always attacked from the rear.
He would get behind the object of his
attack, curb his neck, shut his eyes, and
charge! As may be imagined, the great
horns of the animal, backed up bv the
momentum gathered by his charge, gave
anything but a pleasant sensation when
they came in contact with the legs of his
unsuspecting victim. Generally a board
was strapped to his horns, over his
wouly face, to obstruc. his range of Wis
ion and serve as Il warning to strangers S
OF his warlike propensities. But he
often contrived to tea1 it from his head
and then alas for his unsnspecting VIC
tim.
The boys enjoyed many an hour of
fun with David. The sheep pasture
came up to the barn yard on one side,
and creek ran along by both Where
the pasture came to the creek there was
i.rl l,a,, 1. 4
steep. The Doolittle boys used to get
upon narrow rock hat was just under
the edge Of the bank. Here, when they
stood up, all of their bodies above the
waist could be seen above the level of
the pasture. Placing themselves in this
position, they would attract the atten-
ton of old David by calling and shaking
their hats at him. He was always
ready for battle. With lowered head,
curbed neck and a snort of anger, he
would rush at them with his eyes closed.
Taking advantage of this popularity, the
boys would drop down behind the bank,
and David would go over them and into
the water, with plunge that would
have done credit to Newfoundland
dog. Then he would get back to the
shore, looking wrathful and sheepish:
but Ire could not be induced to renew
the attack again at that time.
His memory, however, was poor, or
his pugnacity was too strong for his dis
cretion, for in an hour, if the boys came
back and showed themselves above the
bank, he was ready for another charge.
Perhaps the foolish animal thought that
some time he would be too quick for
them.
The squire had often watched this
sport, and laughed at David's reckless
ness and at his appearance as he plunged
into the water and came forth with wet
wool and disgusted and wrathful as
pect.
One day the squire was in the barn
yard, sailing the COWS. He had half
bushel measure in bis hand, and as he
pasture, and saw David watching him,
he held up the measure and shook it at
the old fellow.
David gave q snort of defiance, and
began to curb his neck and shake his
head, as ifchallenging the squire to COM
bat.
II wonder if couldn't trick the old
fellow the same way that the boys fool
him?" thought the deacon. He looked
about the yard, cautiously. His sons
were not in sight. and he concluded he
would have laugh at D9vid's expense.
Crawling through the fence, he reached
the rock on which the boys stood in
their encounters with David. The ram
had not seen him. When the squire
raised himself cautiously and looked over
the bank, David was watching the barn
yard, and evidently wondering what
had become of the man who had Just
challenged him.
eli, Davidw cried the squire, holding
the half bushel measure out before him
as target for the sheep to aim at. eli
David!"
David "hi-ed' at once. He gave a
grand flourish, as if to say, Look out
tnereW then charged.
Unfortunately for the squire, he was
so excited over the fun that he forgot
himself completely, and only thought
about the half-bushel measure. Instead
Of dropping out of the sleeps way, he
swung tie measure IN one side, in his
excitement forgetting that David always
shut his eyes when he charged, and
aimed for the object before him when
he closed them. The consequence was
that the ram did not follow the measure.
but boiling straight for the place he last
saw it, struck the poor squire square in
the stomach and he and David went
over the bank and into the creek as if
shot out of a cannon.
s'Wall, | snunw sputtered the squire,
as he made his way 10 the bank. II for
gotall about dodg,ng. lido b'leeve the old
poJ t1.f, hrNl 10, St nv, t,n