Omaha daily bee., 1883-04-24
A JACK POT.
Mr.. spoopendyke Attempts to Teach
His Wife to Play Poker.

endyke, shutting the cards and di.
vidipg the checkers into two even
piles, ''suppose we play q little game
Of poker. Do you know how to play
pokei2'
II guess So" replied Mrs. Spoop.
endyke, hitchipg up her chair and
busting the top of the table with q
towel. Cent that the game where
you have the right and left joker and
pass when you take 1t up9'
IF you have any kind of luck you
do" retorted Mr.. ~Spoopendyke. II
learned the game over at Mr.. Speokle-
wottle's the oth,r night. The way
you play 1t is to have N pair, or two
pairs, or four aces. Four sces beat
anything. When you get four aces
you bet your last cent. Now, I'll deal
five cards apiece"
Il hope I'll get four ages" giggled
Mrs. spoopendyke. "If / do I win,
don't IT,
eyes, If you get EN-" grinned Mr..
Spoopendyke. CHOW, what do you
dot"
Let me see what I'll do" muir
INJURED Mrs. Spoopendyke, nibblipg at
the corner Of one card aud regarding
the rest with a puzzled visage. Sup.
pose I have the three of eighths and
the two of queens, 1 can play,
can't II"
"You might play In o mensgerie!"
snorted MIR, Spoopendyke, running
over his hand and frowning gloomily
as he failed to detect q pair or any.
thing likely to make one. eff you've
got any such hand as that, your
proper sphere would be playing before
crowned heads! What do you do?
Are you coming in2 Where's your
ante, anyway2 Don't you know tie
| your edge2"
"Of COURSE" proclaimed Mrs.
Sp~ookendyke. boldly. ~ know that.
Now, 1 lead my edge" and she laid
down an eight spot; "though I pre-.
sumo your edge will take It," and she
rested her chin on the table and
stared at the card earnestly.
What ye doine2' demanded Mr.,
Spoopendyke. "You don't play that
one. Where's your ante2"
$50 you mean herr futtered Mrs.
~Spoopendyke, hastily catching up her
eight. spot and laying down the queen.
II thought I wouldn't play her till I
had drawn your four aces. Then l
would win, wouldn't II"
"Take up that csrd!" retorted Mr.,
Spoopendyke sternly. "Take up that
card and put one of your checkers In
the middle of the table. There, so.
That's the way to play. Now, how
many cards do you wantl"
"Let me think" f1uttered Mrs.
Spoopeudyke. "Let's see. I believe
I'll take ten."
Better take a gross!" snorted Mr..
Spoopendyke, cycling her wrathfully.
"Perhaps you'd like half a barrel!
Don't you know you can't draw but
fvel If you've got any bad cards,
throw EN- away and I'll give you
more of 'em. If your cards are all
goods, you can stand pat. Do you
want to stand pat2'
81 guess So" sighed Mrs. Spoopen.
dyke, helplessly. eff 1 stand pat,
dol play the eight or the ~queen2"
"You don't play either" replied
Mr.. ~Spoopendyke, helping himself to
five cards and drawing o couple of
kings. "Now, it's my bet. I bet
two; what do you bet7"
"Then, I bet two," answered Mrs.
Spoopendyke, Frightening up as she
began to see her way clear. II bet a
queen and eight" and she laid them
down with confidence.
"That calls my hand" said Mr..
Spoopendyke, ~gleefully, "cnly you
don't bet your cards you bet your
checkers. Put In two checkers and
show your cards.
Mrs. Spoopendyks showed her
checkers into the middle of the table
and laid down three Fights and q pair
of queens.
''Where'd you get emf" reared Mr..
Spoopendyke, recognizing his defeat.
"What'd ye want TO keep talking
about the three of eights and the two
of aueens2 Why didn't ye tell me you
had a full hand7"
"You gave 'em to me-" returned
Mrs. Spoopendyke, d~olefully. IT
dol"
"It makes 1t q jack pot!" growled
Mr.. Spoopendyke, seeing a chance for
himself In his wlfe's utter ignorance of
the game. SNOW we've each got to
pot in n checker, Just because you
played In that way"
"I'm sorry, DEAR" cooed Mrs.
Spoopendyke, rather pleased with the
Idea of getting out of the scrspe at any
expense. sand yet I might have
known 1t would have made it q jack
pot If l had stopped to think"
"When you stop to think, you only
want a stick of chewing gum and q rat
trap to be q female seminary! 10
you know what q Jackpot Isl Got
some kind of q notion that 1t has three
legs and is used to cook mush In ,
haven't ye2 Well, 1t isn't, and 1t isn't
to sit there and grin at, either! 1t
takes a pair of jacks or something as
good as them to open it. Now, take
these cards aud tell me whether you
open 1t or not"
Mrs, S~poopendyke examined her
CARDS critically.
Il stand pat" she remarked after a
long pause. "S4y, dear, are four acez
as good as a jsck.pot9"
Certainly" remarked Mr.. Spoop.
endyke, who had captured an ace,
3 pair of kings ard a couple of tens.
"Nov, I open that pot for four
chips"
"Then I open 1t for four, said Mrs.
Spoopendyke, following her husband,
example.
81 raise you ten," grinned Mr..
Spoopendyk e, UNow vour are play-