Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1883-10-31
GO Don't


lFrom the Boston Transcript
A little volume with the above express
sive title has recently been published,
in the interest of good department; but
the book don't exhaust the subject by q
good deal, and the following "don is, -
relative TO street manners, jotted down
as they come to mind, will prove inter
esting to gentlemen:
Don't keep to the right when walking
upon the sidewalk. Should you do so,
ten chances to one you will attract no
notice from those you meet. Keep to
the left if you do make sensation.
Don't hide your umbrella under your
coat as though you were afraid people
would think you stole it. Make a
Greek cross of yourself by carrying it
under your arm at right angles with
your body. Besides this is the safest
way to carry an umbrella. If any eyes
are punched out by it, you may be Ger
tain that they won't be yours.
Don't carry your cane as though it
were third leg. Let it drag after you
in a manner which shall trip up any
body who comes too near. How can
you know that the man behind you is
not pickpocket, with designs on your
watch end wallet?
Don't sit in the horse cars with your
back square against the side of the car.
Dispose yourself at an oblique angle,
occupying the space of two or three
seats. What is the use of being hog
unless you let folks know it?
Don't step to the front while leaving
car while in motion. A hearty laugh
is as good as meal of victuals. Victuals
cost money; therefore, in the interest of
your fellow travellers, step backward.
Your kindness will be instantly appre-
ciated.
Don't forget to puff vigorously at your
cigar as you pass along the crowded side
walk. 1t is only a mean man who would
wish to keep all the smoke to himself.
Gallantry to the fair sex should make
you esp 3clally generous in your fund
benefaction, when women are near you.
Don't apologize if you happen to step
on a gentleman's foot. It might make
him feel awkward. But turn the matter
off jocularly by reminding him that you
must step somewhere, or advising him
to keep his feet in his pocket. He can
not but admire your presence of mind
and your ready wit.
Don't take any especial pains to point
out the way to the stranger who asks to
be directed. Just as like as not he
won't remember Alright. Tell him to
follow his nose and he will find it, or
push by without seeming to notice him.
Don't walk at one monotonous pace
all the time. If you are with company
walk slowly, two or three abreast. This
will prove trial of patience to people
behind you; but patience is a virtue,
and should be exercised. When YOU
ale alone go at a railroad speed, elbow
ing your way vigorously through the
crowds. Everybody admires activity
and energy.
Don't, when two or three of you get
together for little chat, consider that
you are blocking the sidewalk. The
sidewalk was made for man, not man for
the sidewalk, and it is your province to
enjoy it to the full.
Don't forget to stare at the women
folk. Your eyes were given you to stare
with, and if the women don't like it let
them remain indoors.
Don't pass by a lady without turning
around to peer into her face. If YOU
didn't do this, she might think you were
not jackass, and it would be cruel to
create false impression in her mind.
Don't talk in low tone of voice as
you walk along, unless you have some
thing really worth hearing. IF your
conversation is of your achievements in
guzzling beer or MASKING the girls--as,
no doubt, it is-the more people who
hear you the greater the number of
those who will know you to be su-
perior being.
Don't miss the opportunity of exhib-
iting your fine clothes and refined man
ners in front of the liqnor saloons, the
aters and other places where your prom
inence will be effective.
Don't care for anybody but yourself.
Remember that Providence helps those
WHO help themselves.
ParIeY Vous-