davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1883-07-23
AN AMERICAN SCHOONER IN TROUBLE.

HAVANA, July 21.-The newspapers here
report that American schooner Rebecca is under
going sagua the trouble recently experienced at Cen-
fuegos by the American brig Nettie which seized
and sold for violation OF the Cuban Customs laws.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1883-07-23

George d. Lowe, NJ. B. Hochkss, Fernanao, end NJ
NJ n Kauffmann Mr.. and Mrs. W. L. gilbert III" ''
Gibbon.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1883-07-23
THOMAS RAwsON BIRKs DEAD.

LONDON, July 23.-Thomas Rawson Birks,
the English ecclesiastic, is dead.
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11

An item was recently published to the effect that a clock had been dug from the earth over in Inyo county, where 1t was buried by the big earth quake of 1872, and that it commenced to run at once on being shaken up. The story was generally discredited at the time, but in the last number Of the Inyo Independent one c. ". Johnson publishes a statement to the effect that he unearthed the clock from the debris of an old adobe schoolhouse that was demolished by the earthquake, and that the hands indicated 2:45-the exact time at which the shock occurred. The clock commenced to run when given a lively shake, and has kept good time ever since. Several schoolbooks were alse found uninjured after a burial of eleven years.
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11

THEY CAUGHT ON.-A Imaginable in
 cident occurred at the skating rink Saturday night in which small circle of spectators, composed of ex- Attorney-G General Hart, Senator Kel- logg, Assemblyman Bibb and Dyer of the Chronicle, were badly taken
 by the Vaccinations of a masked lady, attired in pink silk. The fair masker was bewitchingly graceful, and the roguish.eyes flashed encour- aging glances which plainly said "catch on" so when tue maiden ee.tJ 8 pigeon wing'in. front of the admir- CTS and dropped right among the leg islators they did "catch on" Her face was hidden, though the form bespoke beauty oIrl refinement, and General Hart is pardonable'fo for the assuring squeeze he gave her hand, also, Senator Kel- logg for the sly words whispered to the pretty stranger, and Bibb is blameless for encircling her waist as she was about to fall. An hour passed and the Irritation continued unabated, while the eager statesmen whispered innumerable things about their prospects. At 10 o'clock the prizes were announced. Imagine the consternation among those who tried to catch on" when the beautiful lady in pink was given the prize as the second best gentleman skater. of came the blonde wig and mask, and she stood revealed to ller admir- CTS, a man with an immense nous tache.-Chronicle
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11
Sly Trick of a Lazy Horse.

Any one desirous of, verifying the following story need only to take a stand at the foot of Chardon street, where the relief horses are stationed, and watch Lady Knights maneuver- ings. Lady Knight is a veteran on the relief corps of horses, having served in that capacitYseight or ten years, and itis quite evident that dur ing that time she has learned athing or two by observation, if in no other way. Part of the day two horses are kept for the purpose of helping the cars up the hill, and3 they lalternate, or are supposed to,Fin tLeir duties. But Lady Knight is sly boots,E and needs a vigilant eye to see that she doesn't cheat. When the relief horse gets back. k.to.. .Bowdoln square it is un
 hitched.andIgoes.back to the foot of the hill, taking its place next to the curbstone, which indicates to athe next car that the outside horse is to help pull up the hill. ESQ accustomed have theEhorses become to this rou- tine that they seem to go through 1t mechanically, and are often left to go down alone and take their places. Now, this is. one ofzLady Knights favorite tricks: When the other horse comes down and stations himself in his proper place, sidewalks up just ahead of him. ''and then backs her self in between Old Stupid and the curbstone; the consequence Is Old Stupid sometimes pulls three or four successive cars up the hill, aud would probably keep on pulling!forsthe rest of the day did not the attendant come to the rescue. The..look of in
 jured innocence which Lady Knight assumes when the man shakes her out from next the. curb and puts her in her proper place is funny.
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11

The late Luther Malinus Sargent Sr., gentleman of wealth and liter ary ability. was an ardent and con slstent temperance man, yet he was the unfortunate possessor of an iras- cible temper and a very prominent red nose. At one time he presided over a temperance meeting in Box bury. After some introductory re marks, he was proceeding to denounce liquor sellers, wheu a rude fellow in the audience shouted: 'Mr. Sargent, if you are goin' to lecture on temper ance, you'd better take in your signr' This imprudent remark enraged the old gentleman terribly.
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11

The spirit of accommodation that anlmates the average street-car drlver IS illustrated by the following little incident; A man pulled the bellstrap of an Austin street car, but, instead of stopping his car, the driver whip ped up the horse and ran down sev eral blocks before he held up. "Why didn't you stop the car when I rang the bell?" "Couldn't do it Colonel. There was ar old lady running like turkey to overtake the car, and if I had stopped. to let you of she might have got on."
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11

eAceS5eS n m6tCrer years, such as Loss of Memory, Lassitude, Nocturnal Emissions. Aversion to Society. DimneSs of Vision. Noises in the Head; the vital fluid passing UnobSeryad ln the urine and many other diseases that lead to Insanity and Death.
 pr. MiNTiE, who is a regular physician (graduate of the University Pennsylvania) will agree to forfeit Five Hundred Dollars for case of this kind the VITAL RESTOR- ATlNE (under his special advice and treat ment) will not cure, or for anything impure or injurious found in 1t. Dr. Mintie treats all private diseases successfully without mercury. Consultation free. Thorough examination and advice. including anaIvsis of urine, Five dollars. Price of Vital Res torative, three dollars a bottle, or four times the quantity for ten dollars: sent to any ad dress upon receipt of price, or c. o, D., SC cure from observation and in private name If desired, by
 A. E. Mintie, Nj. D.,
 T Kearny St.. San Francisco, Cal.
 SAMPLE BOTTLE FREE Will be sent to anyone applying by letter, stating symptoms, sex and age Strict se- cresy in regard to all business transactions. DIR. MINTIE'S KIDNEY REMEDY, NEPHRETICUA, cures all kinds Of kidney and bladder complaints, gonorIhoea, gleet, IeucoTrhoea. For sale by all druggists at One dollar per bottle: six bottles for Five dollars.
 DIR. MINTIE'S DANDELION PILLS are the best and cheapest Dyspepsia and Bilious cure in the market. For sale by all druggists.
 1JanS3tf
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11

He does nrt have to support the man
 who does not pay.
Mohave County miner., 1883-03-11
THE GREAT ENGLISH REMEDY

IS A NEVER FAIL l 2 Cure for Nervous Debility, Exhausted
 V l tality. $ Seminal
 Weakness, ,Spermator- Lost Manhood, lmpotency, P r osta- torrhea, Para l y s is, and all the terrible ef- fleets of Self Abuse. youthful follies and
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
My Paper Don't Come.

For the benefit OF those receiving
the TINES through tho post-offi.
oes, and also to give postmasters a
hint, we publish the following from
an exchange. 1t will bear the most
careful perusal:
"The uncertain arrival or the un-
certain delivery of papers at the
country postofiices is often the
ground OF complaint against pub.
fishers and editors, Many OF the
Offices are poorly supplied with
conveniences for taking care of pa
pers, no matter with what certainty
they may arrive. The papers arc
iumbled into few llt:le pigeon.
holes or piled upon desk, box or
barrel, to await the call OF subscri-
bers-in the midst OF boots, hats,
brides, horse collars, and other
coarse wares which may DO called
for during tho day by customers.
Country postmasters; in most
cases, being engaged in some mer-
camille business, many newspapers
find their way into some obscure
corner, where they are hid Tor a
time from human eyes as. complete.
ly as if they were'buried in "a noun.
tain cave. In comes the man Tor
his paper, and as il can't be found,
of course il "don't come" The in.
dignant subscriber consequently
abuses the rsscally editor, and per.
haps calls for pen, ink and paper to
write letter OF complaint about
not getting his paper punctually,
when, if the said paper were on.
dowed with speech, it would cry
out, "llere | am, squeezed to death
behind this box or under this bar.
rel" Wo have seen Just such
things at many country postollicos
elsewhere AZ in this country, These
remarks have no reference to any
particular Office, but are meant ior
all whore they will apply"
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
He limited too Soon

| When Georgia father found out
that his son John was sparkling a
certain farmers daughter Tor year
or more without settling any ques.
ton, he called HIM out behind the
stack and SAID to him.
John, do you love Susan Tuck,
err ?"
al guess do, dad"
"And does she love you 2"
"That's what | dunno, and I'm
afraid to ask her."
"Well, you'd better throw out a
few hints tonight and find out. It's
no use wearing out boot leather un.
less you are going to marry her."
That night AT ten o'clock John
came home wreck. His face was
all scratched up, his ear was bleed
ing, his hat gone, and his back was
covered with mud.
"John F! John what on earth is
the matter ?" exclaimed the old man
laying down his paper.
"Bin over TO fuckers" was the
reply.
"And-and"-
"And | threw out few hints to
Susan"
"What kind of hints 2"
"Why, told her I'd been hoof.
ing it two miles four nights out of a
week for the last two years TO sot
up with her while she chawed gum
and sung through her nose, and
now | reckoned it was time fur her
to brush her teeth and darn ur her
stockings, cure tho bile on her chin
an toll her folks that we're ongag
ed"
"And her father bounced you p
mo, dad, no; that's where Pm
consoled. 1t took the whole fam.
ly, including Susan, two hired men,
and three dogs, and then | wasn't
more'n half licked. | guess we
moved on them too soon, dad-I
guess it was not quite time to throw
out hints"
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
Judge Lynch Ahead:

Judge Lynch appears to be rapid
" usurping the functions Of the reg.
ular exeeutioner in this country.
Since the LIST OF last January sixty
five criminals have been hanged by
due process of law, while seventy.
one have beer hanged or shot with.
out ii, In January there were SIX,
in February fifteen, in March three,
in April eleven, in May seven, in
June nineteen, and July ten. The
south furnishes thirty-six of these,
and of this number twenty-five
wsre negroes. OF tho thirty-two
lynehed in the north, sixteen. or
almost one.halt, came to their end
IN parts OF Montana whore thore is
no law administered. -[Chlcago
Herald.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
ADvE Rising RATES.
1t Might Have Been Set Up.


"Hics child, very nice child" OBJ.
served an old gentleman, crossing
the aisle and addressing the mother
of the boy who had Just bit him in
the eye With a wad ofpsper. "How
old are you, my son 7"
"None OF your business p replied
the youngster, taking aim at anoth-
or passenger. H#. -
"Fine boy" smiled the old man.
as the parent regarded her offspring
with pride. IA remarkable fne
boy. What is your name my son p
"Puddin' Tame !" shouted the
youngster, with a giggle al his own
wit.
H.thought So" continued the old
man pleasantly. "If you had given
me three guesses at it, that would
have been the first one would
have struck on. Now, Puddin', you
can blow those things pretty straight
cant you r
"You bet! !" squealed the boy, de.
lighted at the compliment. "Ses
me take that old fellow over there r.
"No, no !" exclaimed the old, gen.
tleman, hastily. "Try 1t on the old
woman was sitting with. She has
boys of her own and she WON'T
mind"
Cant you hit the lady for the
gentleman Johnny 7" asked the fond
parent.
Johnny drew a bead and landed
the pellet on the old woman's nose.
But she did mind ii, and rising in
wrath scared down on the small
boy like a blizzard. She put him
oyer the line, reversed him, ran him
backwards, till he didn't know
which end Of him was in front, and
finally dropped him into the lap Of
the scared mother, with a bene1ic-
ton whereof the purport was that
she'd be back in a moment and skin
him alive.
"She didn't seem to like 1T Pud.
din" smiled the old gentleman,
softly. "She's a perfect stranger To-
me, but understand she 10 tho mat.
ron of Trlants Home, and 4
thought she would like a little iun,,
but was mistaken"
And tho old gentleman sighed
sweetly as he went back to his seat.
He was sorry for the poor little boy;
bat he couldn't help It.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
1t Was All Right.

A man who was looking through
a second hand store in Brooklyn
with q view oil finding a bedstsad To
suit him, finally examined ono and
asked
"Are you sure there are no bugs
in this z"
"Bugs! Wy, dot bodsthoad vas
oudt of my own vanity. We got It
when my brudder Moses vas here,
und now he has gone away, sell il
for half brlce."
"Say, | believe 1t has bugs in IT."
"lmbosslble, mine friendt. Ny
wife vas so neat dot if she know OF
such dings in der house, she would
go crazy"
"And III be hanged II here ISM
proof !" exclaimed the customer, as
he pointed to unimpeAchaDle evi.
donce.
"Yhell vhell p
The customer was going out with
u heart broken look on his face,
when the other detained him and
said:
"Dots all right after all. Efyou
puy dot pedstoad you know you hal
bugs from 4 respectable family.
Moses vas head clork in Rochester,
and you know | vas here dwenty-
Aye years in do beesness."
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
Why a State Can Not be
Sued.


Perhaps II might not be unnter-
estlng to summarize the reasons
why sovereign State ean not be
sued, even by its own consent:
l. claw is rule of action pre-
scrlbed by superior" The sover.
eign has no superior.
2. The King can do no wrong,
because he is above the law, being
its source, and there can be no
wrong but by It's violation.
3. The writ runs in tho name OF
the Sovereign, and is supported by
his power. 1t would be absurd for
the Sovereign to call himself into
court to answer for violation of his
own law under penalty prescribed
by himself.
1. There is no powet TO enforce
Judgment. The State eompels t he
individual to obey the judgment OF
it's courts; it can not compel itself.
The judgment of the court in the
will of the Sovereign, and conse-
quontly can not be made use Of TO
eoerce the Sovereign.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
After the French Style.

$50 you love my daughter, ell p
"Y -es, sir"
"And you have money TO support
her in good fashion 2"
al have 100000 in bank, and an
income of $4,000 year. -
money in bankY All | see you
are no financier, you should have
invested in bonds and doubled your
interest. For instance, | have SO.
curities paying ten per cent.
The young man hurried off 70 get
his cash to buy bonds OF his future
father-in.law. After he has depart.
ed, Lucy enters the library, and
asks:
"Father, did William ask your
consent?"
"Hc did, dear"
"And yoy said 'yes'''
"No, darling, he has no wealth to
give you station"
"But he has $4,000"
"Oh, no. | just raked that in ioI
bonds that won't be worth ten cent,
on tho dollar ak months hence.
love you too we'll to see you marry
q poor man and have to live in
sixth story rooms"
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

Bob then related his experience
with the letter, and his subsequent
adventures.
When he had finished his story,
tho inspector said
"Bob, from this hour you are a
detective attached TO tho regular
force. think that thieves will
have cause to rue it,"
The inspector was right.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

Living only to accumulate
wealth Is like diving to tho bottom
Of a sea for an empty bottle and
staying down there with IT,.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
Marry a Gentleman.

Marry gentleman,
Girls, if you can,
Minded and built
On the generous plan.
Though he may neither
Have silver OF gold
Title or fortune
ITO have or to hold.
Though he nay labor
With spade and with hoe,
Though he may naught
But his mother tongue know,
Though he live under
Society's ban,
Marry u gentleman,
Girls If you can.
Marry Il gentleman,
uirls, il ysu can,
Gentle and tender,
Though no less man,
One who will treasure
His child or his wife,
Scoring to rob them
or sweetness in life,
One who will never
The brute's part assume,
Filling hi. household
With sorrow and gloom,
If on loves altar,
The flame you would fan,
Marry gentleman,
Girls, ifyou can.
You will he happy,
And you will be glad,
Though be only
Be commonly clad.
Pleasure is feeting,
And life but span,
Marry gentleman,
Girls, if you can,
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
Bob Becomes a Detective.

$50 you wish to become detee,
tive 7"
"Yes, sir"
81 suppose you consider yourself
able to give points TO any man on
the force, don't you ?"
"No, sir | am only anxious to
have fair trial. | believe that /
can become n useful Der of the
force after | have had little expe-
rience."
DWELL, sir, am not fond of en-
lp|oying green hands, but as you
seem TO have modest opinion of
yourself | have some hope of max
ing something out of you. The
chlet has requested me to give you
a trial, and so 1 shall have to do so.
shall give you a tough case to be.
gin on, and if you make a success OF
ityou shall have permanent posi-.
ton on the force"
"Thank you, sir. | shall do my
best"
"The only clue which can give
you IS this paper. Ii came into my
possession entirely by accident. 1t
was seen to fall from the pocket of
u man who has been implicated in
several burglarics, and one of my
men. who happened to DO standing
near picked it up and handed it to
nc. think there IS more in it
than appears on the surface. Take
It With you, and see what you can
make OF it,"
Bob Westbrook took tho envel.
opo which the inspector-to whom
he had made application for posi-.
ton on the detective force-gave
him, and left the office.
He had never done any detective
work, but was very ambitious, and
desired to become "a member of the
force.
Going home, he retired to his
room, and proceeded to examine
the letter. The direction was us fol
lows:
"HARRY SINCLAIR, ESQ,
General Delivery,
New York City"
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

the morning ana iouhu MS taie
opened ?"
ale must have felt pretty bud. for
| see by the papers that the police
have no clue to the fellows who did
the job"
81 don't think | ever did such q
clean job or such a safe one. But
when shall we divide the iewelry p
"Meet me at the same place TO-
morrow night as You did to night,
and will bring the s#ag with me,
We can then go somewhere and di,
vide"
"All right. What time p
"Nine o'clock-same as tonight. "
am be there. Good night a"
"Good night !"
So saying, the men left the saloon
and separated.
Bob felt that he had made an i'm.
portant discovery. About week
before a jewelry store had been
robbed of large amount Of jewel
nv. The thieves had left nothing
by which they could be traced, and
although Mr.. Far child, the owner
of the store, had offered large re-
ward, they had thus far escaped de-
tectioh
The following morning Bob
walked into the inspectors Office.
DWELL? ?" said the inspector.
al should like to have the use of
three officers, IN plain clothes, this
evening, sir"
you have discovered something,
then ?"
ayes, sir"
"W hat is il p
"Will you be kind enough to per.
nit me to defer an explanation un-
til to morrow morning, sir | wish
to complete the job before max g
any report"
"Then you expect TO capture the
criminals tonight ?"
ayes, sir"
"lf you do SO, shall have to ,ac.
knowledge that you are born de.
tectve. You shall have the men"
That night, Bob stationed his men
out of sight in the entry, where he
had hidden himself on the preceding
night, and waited for the arrival Of
the thieves.
He had arranged signal with the
men who were concealed, and al
that signal they were to arrest the
men whom he designated.
AS the clock struck nine, the two
thieves approached from different
directions, and met on the corner.
One OF them carried a sa;chel,
which was apparently very heavy
Judging by the way in which he
carried it.
AS they stood minute, talking, 4
drunken man came reeling down
the street, and in endeavoring To
pass them, he gave lurch, and
struck heavily against the man car.
rying the satchel, almost knocking
him down, and causing him to drop
it.
"Whasser mean, sir, by (hic) getn
in gentl'm'ns way Yer drunk
Sir (hic)."
"You fool, you're drunk yourself
Go on about your business p
So saying the thief stopped to
pick up his satchel, when violent
push from behind threw him fat up
on the sidewalk.
At the same instant a shrill whis
tie rang out upon the night air, and
before the two men fully realized
what bad happened, they were Sc
curely handcuffed and on their way
to the station house.
Behind them walked Bob, carry,
ing the satchel, and entirely rocov
cred from the effects OF the liquor
from which he was apparently sui
icring only moment before.
The next morning, Bob appeared
at the inspectors Office carrying {
satchel.
The inspector looked up from biz
d esl, at which he was writing, anc
said:
dwell, Bob, what have you cap
tured2 Something worth the trou
bio hope"
"l don't know ID it's much of
capture, sir" said Bob.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

There are not so many wives
who dare toll all they think Of their
husband as there might be.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06
r. s. ARMITAGE,
ATTORNEY-AT-LAw
And Notary Pubic.

anu Notary fu0Lo.
Late Receiver U. S. land Office, )
HARRISON, ARK.
All business before the Local and Gsner.
81 Land Office such as
The Securing of Patents,
Reinstatement of entries improperly cam
ceied or abandoned through ignorance of
the law,
Change of entries when mistakes have
bean made in the numbers,
Relieving homestead, pre- emtion or other
entries of suspension.
Making fnal proof on homesteads and
presumption under the various laws or COM
muting homesteads to cash entries,
And especially contested presumption and
homestead cases will receive prompt and
- borough attention,
will also prosecute mining claims to
Ratent, Buy and sell LAND WvKRANTs,
and soldier and sailor ADDITIONAL HOME
srEADs, furnish Township plats of the en-
tered lands embraced in the Harrison Land
District. And attend to Land matters gem
orally. a#
Correspondence solicited.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

No ono has such reason to be
proud OF bis success 40 tho father Of
liars.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

The recent mistakes of drug.
gists IN dispensing one drug for an
other, thus causing death, suggest
rules OF safety before administering
medicine. The Fort Worth apotho.
cary, for instance, gave morphine
for quinine, the victim beng a poor
little glrl The Montgomery AID.
vortlsor furnishes the folio wing test
in such case; Quinjne dropped
in water will leave a milky appear
anco, and it is not so quickly dis"
solved, ofton requiring considerable
stirring TO make It melt. Nor
phipe, on the contrary, will readily
dissolve in water and cause no diff.
ference in tho color or appearance
of tho latter. This preeaution may
save many lives. IL does not leave
a patient at tho mercy of an unskill-.
full or careless druggist.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

The man who feels that no is
right cannot be whipped.
The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1883-10-06

The betrayed is always far
better man than IS tho botrayer.