Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1883-09-27

tention of some official was attracted.
This accomplished, she would say:
GOOD morning. l have called for
nv rent, if it is quite convenient" is
Certainly, Mrs. Mayfield, the officer
would reply;; : 1 quite forgot to send il.
I'm very sorry yon.. had the trouble Of
coming for It," ax
Mrs. Mayfield had no stated periods
at which she collected her rent, some
times calling twice in fortnight. at
others letting it accumulate for months.
Nor had she any fixed rental valua-
tion-a quarter, dime, or even a
nickel would suffice. Indeed, the
old lady must have regarded the
sum paid more as an acknowledgment
of ownership than anything, so little re-
lation did it bear to the value of hel
property. She ignored altogether the
formality of receipts, justly deeming.
no doubt, that the city might safely rely
on her sense of honor not to demand the
same rent over again.
Before leaving she would 60 round the
room on tour of inspection to satisfy
herself that the premises were being
kept in tenantable repair. and would
gravely suggest any little alteration in ar
engagements that would occur to her as
being likely to impair the value of the
realty. These wise precautions taken
against the necessity of a suit for dilapi-
dations at the close of the tenancy, she
would pocket her rent and depart.
Then, again, there is Praying Patsey.
He comes occasionally, just as the
Judges are out taking their MONDAY
recess, and, stationing himself in the
doorway of the courtroom, mutters a
short prayer. Whether it be ritual or
extempore, and who may be the
special objects of his petitions bench,
bar, suitors or witnesses-are alike
matters of mystery, inasmuch as his ut
terances are SO rapid and muffied as to
be totally unintelliglble. His act of de-
votion accomplished, he swiftly moves
toward another part of the court there
again to perform his self-imposed duty.
He is strictly impartial, comforting the
benefits of his microscopy offering on
every room in the building, not omit
ting even the Comptroller's Office and
the Bureau for the Collection of Ar
rears. What ideas he may have re-
specting the necessity or value of his
services no one knows, for he speaks to
no one. He is convinced, no doubt,
that his presence and prayers are absO-
lutely essential to the welfare, if not,
indeed, the existence of the building
and its inmates. One thing, at least, is
certain. If he does no good, he does
no harm. sand his lunacy might easily
assume more Objectionable form.
Yet an other demented omicus cur,e
is man who has once or twice made
his appearance, claiming the credit OF
and compensation for the invention OF
the submarine telegraph, the elabora-
ton of the entire postal system
of the United States, and the establish
ment of Civil-Service reform. Consid-
ering the important character of these
achievements, and their great national
value, this public benefactor is very
moderate in his demands. He usually
presents his claim i'm handwriting very
unlike what ope would expectas coming
from such a gifted individual. 1t begins:
Il claim an order from the Supreme
Court for one hundred thousand dol
lars" 1t then specifies the valuable
services just mentioned, as being the
items on which the claim is based, and
concludes with a statement that, being
in immediate need, p small installment
on account will be very acceptable. He
is considerate enough to intimate that
il it be not convenient to give immedi-
ate attention to his demand he will call
again. 1t goes without saying, that he
ALWAYS is told to call again.
i Latterly, too, the courthouse has
been honored by the visits of middle
aged woman with Celtic face, a
determined expression, and a strong
accent. She has suffered depreciation
of character at the hands OF
some person or persons unknown,
through which she has been "deprived
of the means of earning livelihood. "
She announces her intention of attend
ing the sessions of the courts until one
or other of the Judges removes this dis
ability. 1t is to be hoped that sooner
or later some way will be found to ac-
complish this good lady's wishes, for
she is an unfortunate soul and has the
staying power of Coleridge's "Ancient
Mariner"
Perhaps the most unintelligible rep
resentative of the genus is an Jsraelite
who haunts the corridors and favors all
corners with long and rambling
chronological disquisition on two kinds
of Jews whom he calls Reuben Jews
and Susan Jews, for which latter class,
it may be said, he entertains the most
supreme contempt. He kindly volun-
teers the information that Susan
is not only in Jerusalem. but in
New York and all over the world.
1t is possible he may be right.
Susan is a tolerably ubiquitous person
age. When questioned as to the identi-
ty of the particular Susan to whom he
has reference, he waves his hand i'm
patiently and informs his questioner
that he can find out all about it in the
1 Book of Esther. He generally closes
his discourse with the following puz-
zling conundrum:
"Can they take away mine property
on a six-days' summons, without name,
without date and without amount?''
Naturally, the person questioned
usually comforts our friend with a
prompt and decided answer in the neg
alive, but is met Immediately by the
perfectly crushing query:
Then. why don't they pay me my
rent?''
Why, indeed? Perhaps, though, it is
that they haven't got the money.
All these lesser lights, however. pale
before Mr.. Heintzlemann. They lack
the element of permanence. Their visits