Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1883-07-31
WHAT A LIE DID.
A GOOD JOKE ON THE CANDIDATE FOR Gov
ERNoR.
From the Arkansaw Traveler.l

fFrom the Arkansaw Traveller.
81 once had an example of how well
| It is to tell the truth" said gentleman
who was once prominent candidate for
Governor Of Arkansas. "Some time ago
| was travelling on horseback through q
very lonely part of the country. l was
never brave man, and / was not in the
leafs surprised upon discovering that l
was scared. Every rustic Of the leaves,
every sudden cry of bird, startled me-
I couldn't think Of anything but robbers
and desperadoes, and shuddered as | re-
membered the man who, years ago, had
been found in those woods murdered in
cold blood. Every feature Of the CHASTITY
face came up, and turned sick when
the gaping wound in the throat came up
with startling versimilitude.
"While thus reflected a short turn Of
the lonely road, winding around thickly
wooded hill. brought me almost face to
face with two men who seemed to be
standing for me. Their horses were
hitched to neighboring grapevine, and
the suggestive manner in which they
looked at the animal / was riding sent
thrill, like a streak Of ice-water, up my
back. | saw at once that they were des-
perate men, and felt that they would
not hesitate to Kill me. Fight was out
Of the question, for any such move on
my part would, was convinced, prove
certain death. For the first time in my
life l resolved to play the bully, and as
suming what l fancied was an uncon-
cerned expression, l said 'good-morn-
ing
"'How are YOU they replied. Go
ing far
So don't know as that is any of your
business replied. Il don't want any
trouble with you, for | have decided to
lead a better life. Never again do |
want it said that shed the blood of
human being"
"a bad man, l reckon said one Of
the desperadoes. .
"'At one time / could not have deni-
ed such an accusation but as tell you,
have resolved never to kill another man.
hope that you will not modest me-
"'Hold on, pardner.'
I've go, no time to talk y
"'But, hold on What's your
=
a. I'm Bill Poison, the outlaw, and
the man Of whom you have often heard.
| have killed men for less than this, and
| don't want you to cause a breaking OF
my resolve.
"'Do as you like about your resolve,
said the taller of the desperadoes. I'D
like to give you a bit Of advice. | don't
know who you are, but know that you
are not Bill Poison the robber.
"'How do you know:
because am Bill Poison, and this
is my brother
"'Oh, Lord l duplicated. have
mercy on me y
"'CEmb off that horse, Cap; l reckon
we had better hang you right here =
Il begged, but l saw no mercy in
their eyes. l prayed, but heard no
answer.
"'Tll teach you how to 60 around the
country committing depredations and
laying them on me Fine man you are
Stole this horse, | reckon. John, get
that rope off my saddle. Well swing
him up right here .H !
"'Oh, my kind friends ] never COM
mitted any depredations. am candi-
date for Governor of Arkansas, and am |
on my way to meet an opponent at
place of discussion. You wouldn't hang !
a Governor, would you, Just think of
what your State would lose =
"'Who is your opponent :
"'Colonel Blacket.'
"'What sort of fellow is he ?
"'He's bad man
"'Are you well acquainted with
him.
~ never saw him, but know that
he's bad man.
Hes much better man than yon
ire, or at least will soon exhibit more
capacity for executive duties than you
AN possibly show. In short, he'll be
he liveliest man pretty soon.'
"They put the rope around my neck.
prayed in vain. l asked the Lord to
orgive my sins and closed my eyes, every
moment expecting to be drawn up.
"'If let you 90 will you promise
lever again to use my name ? I'm gly II
81 swear won't. Let me live, and
II be better man. I'll do anything