The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1883-02-03
MISCELLANEOUS.

Red headed student to professor a. Pro-
fessor. why is it that you never seem to re-
csgnize me on the street?" Professor ::
We'll Mr. X. the truth is / am slightly
color-blind." A rL. II
When a New Yorker wakes up on the
day Of judgment, about the year 3402. he
will grab morning paper, and the first
thing he will see will be this paragraph: cit
is announced that the Brooklyn bridge will
be finished by the middle of January"
Rev. DR.. Hall said that every rock was
a sermon. When a boy was stealing apples
from Mr.. Halls orchard. the latter pelted
him out Of the orchard. When the boys
father subsequently, asked him why he
Iimped, he replied that he was very much
struck with one Of Mr.. Halls sermons
A colored blacksmith # Vienna Georgi,,
was shoeing mule not long ago, when the
animal disengaged itself and drove one Of
its hind feet against the negro's head with
the force of batterIng-ram. A few days
afterwards some one asked the owner if the
blacksmith sustained severe in uries. Il
can't say that he did," responded the man
dejectedIy, /" but the mule goes on three
legs"
A clergyman im one of the Scotch com
try districts, says Chambers Journal. had
a stranger to offisiate for him one day. and
meeting his beadIe afterwards he said to
him .sWeH, Dougall. how did you like
Sundays preaching ?'' '' Ii was great deal
owre plain and simple for me" replied the
be die. sI ike sermons that tumble the
Judgment and confound the sense. Cd, sir,
/ never saw me that could come up TO your
self at that"
Can you give me something that will
drive from my mind the thought OF sorrow
and bitter recollection ?" asked q sad-looking
man of Burlington druggist. The man of
medicine nodded. and put him up little
dose OF quinine. and NORWOOD. and rhu-
barb. and EPSON salts. and dose Of castor
oil. and gave it to him. and for six months
the man couldn't think o. anything in the
world except new schemes for getting the
taste out of his mouth.
Among anecdotes of first nights of new
pieces the following deserves place twas
the first night-and morning-of = Monte
Cristo," drama which, for Its length. might
have been of Chinese origin. At l2-45 in the
morning the curtain rose upon the last act.
Charles fletcher. in the character OF the hero
;s discovered seated in contemplative .tti-
tude. Like the ghost in -'Alonzo the Brave"
m he moved not, he spoke not !; but there
c,me from the gallery. IN c ear somewhat
sad. but gentle voice. these words : IL hope
we are not keeping you up sir The effect
NAV be Observation-Disclosures Society.
A Philadelphia paper tells OF a fashion,
able Young lady's visit TO a cooking school,
where her attention was eqaly divided be-
tween a new dress worn by an acquaintance
and the direction for making cake. Upon
rs,,rnino home she undertook to write
down the recipe for the cake for her mother,
and the old lady was paralysed when she
-sad Take ID. of flour; ten rows OF
,,l.atioo down the front the white of two
eGgs cut bias; a pint of milk rufied around
tbe neck; + ID. of currants with yards OF
head trimming; grated lemon peel with
Snanish fichu; stir well and add a semi
Sting paletot with visite sleeves; butter
.ha nan with Brazilian necklace; garnIsh
,,,;tb icing and jetted passementene; bake
inn moderately hot oven until the over
st;rt is tucked from the waist down or
o;,he, side, and finish with large satin
-, Her mother said she wouldn't ea
- cake. and she thought the new-fangle6
IDEAS in cooking ought to be frowned dawn