Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1883-12-13
No.. T..
LAX ESIDE MUSING.
The Horse Reporter Discourses OF the
Crazy Quit.
iChicago Tribune.

rs this where they edlt?"
"Yes, maan, replied the horse reporter
as ne looked up and discovered a trinity
built young lady standing i'll the doorway.
This is the exact spot where Right, en-
vironed on every side by Intellect, deals
telling blows against Wrong and In justice,
clad though they be in the garments Of
Might and Oppression. Armed with the
lances of Thought that glisten brightly in
the Sunlight of Reason, the editor stands
ever ready, a helmeted knight in the holy
cause Of Justice full panoplied, and with
weapon in couchant pOise'
THAT wasn't exactly what / wanted to
find out about" said the young lady. Il
am going to make crazy quilt, and MAN.
ma said that an editor could probably tell
me all about it"-and bewitching smile
illuminated the features of the fair visitor.
'Our insane bed-clothes editor,' said the
horse reporter, lis not here at present, and
the rest of us naturally feel somewhat diff
fident about intruding upon the domain of
quilts which are suffering from temporary
alteration of mind and pillow shams con-
cerning, whose mental condition there is
doubt.
Il hardly think you understand me, sir"
continued the young lady. "a crazy quilt
isn't really and truly crazy, you know-it
is simply called so because, being made of
silk OF different colors, it presents an outre
appearance"
Presents what ?"
"An outre appearance - looks rather
strange, you know"
20 yes sort of dizzy looking you mean"
THAT probably, expresses the idea, sir,
although not perhaps in the most choice
language. l should be very glad, though,
if you could give me some information
about this matter, because it is necessary
that should begin the work at once"
Making the demented quilt for your
self?"
mo, sir-that is, not exactly" and a
vivid blush suffused the young lady's
features. But I want to have it done
before the first of January, because we
won't have any room for the frame in the
other house"
(Which other house,"
"Why, the one THAT is, we-oh, l
think you're. awful" and more bushes
ensued.
'The first of January is not generally
considered the most auspicious season of
the year for moving said the horse
reporter The blithe carol of the plumber
and the low, sad wall of the man who is
trying to thaw out the water pipes with
two-inch candle and jug of hot water,
with which he will eventually inundate
himself, are about the only features of
prominence connected with domestic life
in Chicago at that season of the year.
Why don't you wait until May-.joyous,
happy May-when the buds are bursting
and the robins, tunetul harbingers of the
June days so soon to come, are twittering
on every bough?''
That's just what l have said all along"
replied the young lady, but Charlie de-
clares he will never live in the same house
with mamma, and-nOw / shan't say
another word" and more blushing ensued.
Oh said the horse reporter, you're
going to be married, are you?"
'Yes, sir. That is Charlie said"
Il know what he said He leaned you
contidentially against his suspender, and,
speaking in low, tremulOus tone, asked
you if you felt that you could leave parents,
brothers, sisters, tish-balls ON Sunday, and
all that makes home at once the altar of
our affections and the Joy of our lives, and
live torevermore with him. And you
yanked him out of the realms Of Doubt so
quick that it made his head swim. Isn't
that about it?'
why, yes sr-that is, said
Certainly. You said that when girl,
standing on the threshold of Womanhood
and watching with wistful eyes for the
mists of futurity to lift sees advancing the
one man to whom she can give her heart,
all the doubts and fears disappear as if by
magic, and she knows only that great
happiness and holy content enshroud her
being. Charlie then kissed you warmly
about an inch below your nose, and broke
himself the next day buying an engage
ment ring. He calls at the house every
night now, and when he says to you, 'Myr-
tie, do you love me as much this evening
as you did last Thursday afternoon? yeu
look at"
''He doesn't call me Myrtle at all,' inter-
rupted the young lady. "My name is
Edith"
''It's the same thing rose by any
name would have as many thorns. When
he asks you if you love him as much as
you did last Thursday, you climb up
little higher on his neck and want to know
how he can ever doubt you. It's all right,
though. Be true and loving wife, and
perhaps some day Charlie will give you
quarter to spend without requiring an
itemized account, sworn to before notary,
as to where such a vast sum has gone
Cherish his love as you would tender
plant that the rude blasts of winter would
destroy. Make your whole life constant
to promote his welfare, but do not
finish that quilt"
why not, sir?"
Because" was the repky 1T would re-
call TO him the hannv mast y