The Indiana State sentinel., 1883-08-29
WIT AND PLEASANTLY,

A great deal of religion runs in thi, way:
-"Bob, don't you wsnt to get some Of thu
apples over the fence7" "No, / don T."
"Why not2" "Well, first because it's wrong
to steal sppl5s, and second because there's
big dog in the yard"
O'd Mrs. Makeup Ito young Mrs. Lucky,
who is the fortunate possessor of wealth of
brown tresses. and who has never lost even
cne of her beautiful teeth.) "Oh, dear me,
yes, my dear, quite agree with you in all
YOU say about the welcome rest OF the Sab
bath. And then, too, we are free from fash
ionable callers on that day at least, and after
we've been TO church we can go about in an
old gown, without our false hair ard teeth,
and be so comfortable.
From the French.--The Baroness has q
charming little daughter, but who is terribly
indiscreet. The other day, in the midst of q
reception, baby cried and writhed on &C.
count of the tCothache. Her mother tried to
console her. "There. my darling, be reason.
able-don't cry. Your toothsche will pass
away" "How will it go 'wsy2" cried baby,
her voice broken by sobs. "I can't tske my
teeth out as YOU can, mammal
The spread of iniidelity: A gentleman wag
reproached by prudish Christian dame for
claiming TO be descendent of celebrity Of
the Middle Ages. "The claim is preposter-
ous," she said, "the Prince of c. was never
married. He was "stumped" for q moment
but recovering HE wit, asked: "You are de-
sctnded from the pOsterity Of Adam and
Eve, are you not2" Certainly" she re.
piled, without the least hesitation, "Tell me
then, who was Gains wife," The lady re-
tired, muttering that the spread of infdelity
was threatening the country with ruin
Brooklyn Eagle.
Thad Stevens used TO say that a conten ed
farmer was rsrer creature than white
black bird. Illustrative of the assertion, he
used TO tell story of q certain farmer at
whose house he once visited. While stroll
ling over the farm, Mr.. Stevens observed
that the farmers corn crop, which was just
ripening, was remarkable beyond anything
he had ever seem "My friend" said Mr.
Stevens to the farmer, ''thIs is truly msgni-
fcentl There is nothing left to be desired in
your corn yield this year" Well" re-
sponded the farmer. gusrdedly, ''it is purity
fair; purity fair. But" snd this with no.
ticesble tinge of sadness, 'thsr might be
few more cunnels-just few more cunnels
-atthe end of the cob."
An Oil City deacon recently got a new
pair of trousers, which proved to be several
lncn6S TOO long Wncn no dAeu snoIn on' ~
being late on Saturday night, the tailors
shop was closed, and he took the trolsers to
his wife and asked her to cut them off and
hem them over. The good lady, whose din
ner had, perhaps, disagreed with her, brus-
auely refused. Tie same result followed an
application to the wife's sister and the eldes.
daughter. But before bed time the wife, re.
letting, took the pants, and cutting of six
inches from the legs, hemmed them up nInce-
ly and restored them to the closet Half sn
hour later her daughter, taken with compunc-
tion for the unfllisl conduct, took the trous-
ers, and. cutting off six inches, hemmed and
replaced them. Finally, the sister-in-lsw
felt the psngs Of conscience, and she, too,
performed an additional surgical operation
on the garment. When the deacon appear
cd at breakfast on Sunday the family thought
Highland chieftsn had arrived.