Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-07-19
Comical Cuttings.


key.
/ As usual, this season some of the
seaside bathing dresses will be hornd
enough to make the little bald-headed
I fishes stand ON their cranipms and
/ weep.
Dr.. Grenell. who probably thinks
4 he knows, says all true loveis ground
/ ed in esteem. And he might have
added that it is often nwtmed in Ice
cream.
I Down in Arkansas a fewweeks ago,
a man was bitten by skunk, and
shortly died of hydrophobia, We
should think he would have been glad
to die of anything.
/ A poet says: There is in song
within the Tyre that never yet was
sung. 1t may be the same way with
the liar. too, but he doesn't know 1t.
Mr.. w. w. Corcoran, of Washing
ton. intends to erect monument over
the grave of the late Bishop Pmck-
ney, of Maryland, in Oak Hill Gene
terry.
Alexander, the colored cadet at
West Point. " says the Lorillard Cour-
ier-J Journal DEM, was appointed by
4 Congress man Geddes, of Ohio Dem
ocrat
Mr. Pierre Lorillard, of New York,
is still suffering from the wound in his
leg caused by a splinter entering It
during the collision of his yacht with
a ferryboat.
/ General Steedman, now chief of
Police of Toledo, O., has set his face
against bali playing on Sunday with
in the city limits of the city notwith-
standing he is a Democrat.
The Rev Stephen H. Tying, Sr, Of
New York, who is 81 years old, has no
recollection of anything occurring IN
the past fifty years, but as to events IN
1890 and before, he is perfectly clear
Charles Stewart Parnell, the Irish
, leader, has been treating his friends IN
; the British Parliament TO large, luS-
, cious peaches, received from the eN-
tensive orchards of his brother John
in America.
5 \ daughter OF john Bright the En-
E glish statesman, is the guest of Gen
= eral O. @. and Mrs Howard. The
f party are now in the Yellowstone
4 Park. and will visit other points of i'm
e terest III the west.
) Word has been received in Seneca
Falls. n. Y, of the death of the
I Countess Won BotlImer. wife of tho
! Military Secretary of the Department
e of Prussia. She was formerly Mis-,
j Josie Parsons, of that village
g Miss Lillian Duties, formerly teach
e er of English literature III the Osh
l. kosh WIS., Normal School, has ac
t cepted position to teach that brancl
r in Wellesley College, Mass, wher
. she was once a student.
r 4 rascally baggage thief stole
t dudes valise the other day, and whel
i he opened up his plumber he founi
e twelve linen collars, twelve pairs lin
a en- cuffs, one flannel shirt and on
e pair of socks.
, The quantity of beer produced il
. the United States last year averaged
/, more than fourteen gallons for ever
j inhabitant of the country Somebod,
, has played wretched mean trick Oh
us then.
! NotAn disgusts the small boy 81
:. much as seeing policeman riding On
: the back steps Of street car. lie can
: see why a policeman, who rides free
: and weighs as mucv as five small boys
is of any more advantage To the cal
: company than a small boy who dom
. pay.
See here. landlord, didn't you ad
vertise am entire absence Of flies ano
!. mosquitoes, at this place" Certain
ly sir; but those advertisements We're
prepared in March, and / assure you
in the most solemn manner that we
weren't troubled in the least until the
last of May. If you had only come
mp here in April you would have had
a glorious time,
Two million children in the Japa-
nese public schools are being taught
on the American and English system.
All. yes; learning to use revolvers
and steal land. Wei. this may be OF
great benefit to them by the time they
are men and women, if England leaves
them any land to steal.
a young man writes us for light on
. delicate subject He says he has
fallen in love with sweet girl TO
whom he has just been introduced and
whose home he has never visited, and
he wants MS to tell him how TO open
the campaign Well, we should first
endeavor to gain the respect and es-
TEEN of the dog if the girls father
keeps one
An odd accident happened in "A Ken
lucky papers makeup the other day:
Tackled on record Of how the apos
ties diedr-James was beheaded, Bar
tholomew nayed to death, etc.-came
a paragraph saying I'VE are gratified
to note that 50 far the candidates are
conducting the campaign in a gentle
manly manner.