The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1883-11-07
ANOTHER RIB BROKEN

A queer case has just come to light in
chicago. A young man spent an even
ing with his girl, and during the even
ing, while the family was present in the
parlOr, he was as demure, and bland.
and childlike as could be wished, The
mother came into the room, after the
family had retired, to get a handker-
chief she had left and the young man
was seated in chair in the middle of
the room, while the girl was seated on
a sofa, and nothing that the mother
could see, in the actions of either, led
her to think they were more than pass
ing acquaintances. 1t seemed to her as
though the young people had met be-
fore, but there was no evidence that
they were very well acquainted. All
night, after he had gone, the girl com
planned OF a pain in her side, and in the
morning doctor was called, and he
found that two of the girls ribs were
broken. How it was done nobody knew.
The girl could not tell for the life of
her, though she blushed when asked
about it, and the mother looked very
wise as she looked at the doctor. The
doctor made inquiries, set the ribs and
went away, and the girl proceeded to
recover. That evening the young man
called, and was astOnished when in
formed of the extent of the girls in
juries, and wondered how it could have
happened, though the mother watched
his face closely as he spoke, and detect
ed not only a blush, but a prOfuse per-
spiTatiOn on his face. She had been a
girl once herself, and though she had
never had any ribs broken, she had been
hugged some. IL was a trying position
for all of them. The father was away
on trip to Wisconsin, and when he
az nnn hOrnn ho fAnv hn. 20 n
ed to him. He was told that the ribs
just simply broke themselves, and that
neither the mother, nor the girl nor the
young man could account for it, and
yet all three Of them blushed terribly.
The father patted his girl on the head,
told her she would be better when she
got over it, and then called the young
man into the library. The young man
was so weak he could hardly walk, and
when he sat down he took out a hand
kerchief and mOpped his brow, and
wished he was dead. The father look
ed the young man over, and was sorry.
He finally said:
Young man, guess L can give you
some points on hugging. You must first
learn that girl is not constructed on
the same plan of an iron fence or q
truss bridge, A girl is delicate piece
of mechanism, like fine watch, full of
little springs, wheels, jewels etc. The
breaking of any one of these would
cause her to cease keeping time, and
necessitate her being taken to a jeweler
for repairs. In hugging a girl you
don't want to 90 at it as if you were
raklng and binding, or catching stur-
geOn. l know that where the family
sits up late, with young couple, and
spOils several precious hours of hug
ging, that unless the young man has a
good head, when left alone with the OBJ
ject of his affection, that he is liable to
OverdO the matter and try to make up
for lost time. He seems to want to hug
up lot ahead, and grabs the girl as
though he wanted to break her in two.
This is wrong. You should go at it
calmly and deliberately, even prayer
fully, and be as gentle as though she
was an ivory fan. The gentle pressure
to the hand that girl loves, even the
touch, is as dear to her as though you
run her through a stOne-rUsheT. You
should not grab her as you would bag
of oats, and leave marks on her that
will last life time, A loving woman
should not be made to feel that her life is
in danger unless she wears corset made
of boiler iron. | hope this will be les
son to you, and hereafter, if you cannot
control your feelings, will provide
wooden Indian for you to practice on at
first, until you have developed your
muscle, and get tired, and then we can
turn our daughter loose in room with
you and not feel that it is necessary to
have a surgeon handy. In allowing you
to keep company with my daughter, do
not agree to provide you with human
gymnasium, dressed in a mother Hub
bard wrapper, and wearing bangs. You
can readily see that girl would not
last season through if she had to have
ribs set once week. Please think this
thing over, and if the girl Is we'll
enough next Sunday you can drop in
and try some more ribs. Now you 90
home and hug hat rack for an hour or
two, and have it repaired in the morn
ing"
The young man went out into the
night air, took his hat off to cool his
head, and hired a man to kick him.
Peck's Sun.