The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1883-09-12
" COurtship Is PrObation.N

There are some good words that have
almost dropped out of the English lam
gusge because the thing which they
describe has gone out of fashion. Court
ship is such word. OF paving court in
the old-fashioned way to a lady, with ex-
pectancy that it wifi take time for &C.
quaintance to blossom into friendship and
friendship to ripen into love. there is not
much in our days. Instead we have the
mad" falling in love- for which our
novels are partially responsible; which
have much marrying in haste and repent
ing In leisure to answer for because of
their false teaching in exalting impetuous
passion above calm, patient, intelligent
love. Mr.. Ruskin demands over-much
patience in asking the lover in our age of
quick decision and rapid achievement to
take as much time to win his wife as
Jacob did in the slow-moving Orient.
But there is great deal of practical wis.,
dom in this counsel of his from Fors
Clavigera "When youth is fully in
love with girl, aud feels that he is wise
in loving her, he should at once tell her so
plainly, and take his chance bravely, with
other suitors. No lover should have the
insolence to think of being accepted at
once, nor should any girl have the cruelty
to refuse at once; without severe reasons.
If she simply doesn't like him, she NAV
send him away for seven years or so-he
vowing to live on crosses, and wear sack
cloth meanwhile, or the like penance; if
she likes him little, or thinks she might
come to like him in time, she may let him
stay near her, putting him always on
sharp trial to see what stuff he is made
of, and requiring, fguratively, as many
hon-skins or giants heads as she thinks
herself worth. The whole meaning aud
it oughtnt to be shorter than three years
at least; seven is, to my own mind, the
orthodox time. And these relations be-
tween the young people should be openly
and simply known, not to their friends
only, but to everybody who has the least
interest in them and girl worth any.
thing ought to have always half dozen
or 80 of suitors under vow for her. There
are no words strong enough to express the
general danger and degradation of the
manners of mob-courtship, as distinct
from these, which have become the fashion
almost the LAWN modern times when
in miserable confusion of candlelight,
moonlight, and limelight-and anything
but daylight-in indecently attractive
and ipsanely expensive dresses, in snatched
moments, in hidden corners, in accidental
impulses and dismal ignorances, young
people smirk, and ogle, and whisper,
and whimper, and sneak, and stumble,
and hutter, and tumble, and blunder into
what they call love; expect to get what
ever they like the moment they fancy it,
and are continually in the danger of losing
all the honor of life for folly, and all the
joy of it by an accident" No love of a
young man or maiden is worth having
that is not honest, simple, guileless that
depends on theatrical surroundings
dress, dance, music, social excitement
that fourishes only in the atmosphere of
ballroom, party, or theater; that
cannot sing in the heart in working
hours. The lover that needs such stimu-
lants to waken his love or keep it alive
has no love that will long survive mar
riage.-Christian Union.