Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1883-10-20
Saturday Smiles.

A little girl at Newport seeing the willow
phaetons for the first time, exclaimed, "Why,
mamma, everybody rides out in their clothes
baskets here.''
He should be classed among the gents fur
nlshlng StOrrs. "-NOrristO,cn Herald.
A correspondent of the Christian Leader saws:
'Ihe only objection have to Vermont is that
one has to drag around three months OF the
year on Wheels"
It's mighty mean man who wrote "Pull
down the blind" He would probably be in
favor OF beating the pples.-Pits6urg Tele-
graph.
When scissors grinder stops in front of a
western newspaper office the editor-n-chief al
ways welcomes him in persOn.-Philddelphi
CdH
The Boston Post thinks it kind Of breaks up
tne glrl at the summer resort to have him
naively ask her, whats going to be your little
dodge to avoid recognizing me when we meet
in the city,"
lawyer was summoned as witness in q
certain case. The Judge, finding that the wit
ness was lying badly, Interrupted him, saying:
II beg OF you to forget your profession for a
moment and tell US the uth."-Spanish Joke.
Dear me-" cried Mrs. Blossom, as she laid
down the paper, ''it does seem to me as il those
state militia fellows are always in trouble.
Here's an account of a recent inspection, where
the company turned out ifty-three men. Too
pad amt lt!"-AnOn.
1--WE are told" said Miss to her Sunday
school sem class that Mary kept all those things
does that mean!" 'Oh. she just took and
pounded EN- in" said little girl, energetically.
lady says her husband will sit on a barbed
wire fence all the afternoon to see a base ball
match, and neveg move a muscle; but when he
goes to church heNfan't sit in cushioned pew
for fifteen minutes without WI iggling all over
the seat and changing his position forty times.
The 11-year-old daughter of Julian Hawthorne
runs mile in seven minutes three times
week for exercise. What started her to rum
ming that way is not explained, but most likely
ne insisted in reading his own stories to her.
IL tell you," said the bad boy, confidently, to
seem small-don't believe she'd weigh more
IMAM 90 IN her stocking feet-but her slippers
Is heavy. though, you bet!"-Lo,oeH Citizen.
Herbert Spencer says Americans are so driven
DY business that they never stop to leisurely
e eSa anything. Guess he never saw 500 or
hours watching three men raising an office safe
u lOurth-stOry NATURALIZATION Gazette.
certain country Clergyman used to tell q
gooo story OF his going to a new parish and ask
ing parlsnloner what his occupation was. II
am esan5 5ne village ratcatcher" the man replied.
that he was the village parson, whereupon the
ratcatcner was good enough to observe that he
supposed 1--WE must all get living somehow"
where are you taking me tor" asked a
criminal, addressing the detective who had just
arr arrested him. II IN taking you to the Office Of
wish to observe in this case, then" said the
cuiprit, "that it is the office seeks the man, and
not the man the office. "-Someruile Journal
Father" said young Austin swell with
sporting proclivities. ''explain to me something
ABOUT protection. What il the duty on sugar."
snoe Gon b,,+ Know anything about the duty on
duty on tobacco. It is my duty to seize all the
cigars can get hold OF, ," and, reaching over to-
ward his sons vest pocket he snatched a hand
iui OF Havanas $50 that's the duty on tobacco,
Is lt!" SAID the young man. "Well, may be
somewhat muddled on political economy, but
that looks good deal like free trade"-Ieu.s
Svt.ngs.