davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
That Settled 1t.

A corpulent old German who has been
doing thriving business in little town
suddenly refused to pay his debts. The
goods have paid him frequent visits in
fruitless attempts to collect the money
1ue to their firms. The other day a
long-legged representative of a London
house,walked into the establishment pre-
sided over by the erratic merchant and
presented statement amounting to
Eos.
''Ich got no money" said the Ger
man, as he balanced himself on a
cheese box.
''The dickens, you haven'tr' roared
the presumptious collector, slamming
his bag down on a barrel. mo monkey
business about this thing! This is the
fifth time / have come here for that bill,
and now propose to have it."
'.Vell, mein frent," replied the
merchant, little disconnected, sIch
don't know how you viii git
him..
The traveller drew himself up to his
full height, and, assuming the air of a
prize-fighter, leaned over the counter
and whispered at the top of his voice:
''Say! do you know that / killed a
Dutchman once?n
"Och! SOP Dot ish yust der reason
Wy Ich left Shermanny mein self al
.eady," retorted the old Teuton, as he
reached for convenient ax-handle.
The traveller paid small boy 2 six
pence to go back and rescue his bag.
HqR Street Nesga
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
Hosiery.

Black stockings still prevail for gen.
eral use, but there is an effort to revive
the fashion Of having the hosiery match
the dress. Solid colors with embroid-
cry in open designs and in thick work
are chosen for handsome silk stockings,
fine Balbriggans, and for those of Isle
thread; the embroidery begins at point
on each side and widens until it almost
meets on the instep, and this needle
work, as well as the plainest clocks.
must be of the color of the stocking
not in contrast to it. For the street,
black, gray, navy eblue, emerald green
and dark cardinal-not scarlet-ar the
colors most used. To match suits there
are golden brown stockings with tan
color, seal brown bronze, Judic, mouse
and blue-gray For evening toilets ar
flesh tints, salmon and pale coral; pearl
white stockings are worn only BIZ
brides Ribbed silk stockings cling to
the limb and are warm enough for out
Cf-do0r use in winter; raw silk stock
ings are also for street use, and with
fleece Innings are comfortable in the
coolest weather. Ribbed Balbriggan
hose made OF the fine Sea Island cotton
are shown in all the dark coiors, with
white soles that have a fresh and clean
ly appearance; these are especially liked
in black, navy blue, seal brown and
cardinal. Cashmere stockings are soft
and warm, and are preferred to those
of merino as they do not shrink;
it is poor economy to buy low
priced wool stockings, as they
are not well shaped, are badly
dyed and do not wear well. The most
luxurious stockings are mixtures of
camels hair and silk, with the toes and
heels entirely of silk; these are $3.50 .
pair, in soft, duh gray and drab shades.
Misses stockings Of wool or of cotton
match the dark color of the dress, or
else they are black. French cashmere
stockings OF dark coiors with white cot
ton feet are chosen for children. Boys
wear long ribbed stockings, either navy
blue, gray or black. Fine wool stock
ings for very small children are now
woven double over the knees.-Harper's
RHzd9'
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
HOME, FARM AND GARDEN.
Sick animals should be separated

Sick animals should be separated
from healthy ones.
--Spaded in among The roots of trees
wood ashes will kill the insect eggs that
harbor there It is also on excellent
fertilizer Chicago Journal.
To bake beets wash them perfectly
clean; put in a pan with a little
water, and bake until they are tender;
the time varies with the size of the
beet, an hour being small enough allow
ance for beet of medium size. When
they are done remove the skin and
serve in the same way that you do q
boiled beet.-N. r Times.
Cream cookies are made of one cup
OF sour cream, one cup of butter, two
cups OF sugar, two eggs, one teaspoon
ful of soda, flour enough to make a
dough of medium body, neither as soft
as possible to roll nor as hard. These
may be rolled thin, and will be light and
rich. Bake in quick oven, but do not
let them brown. N 7. Post.
Milking in the barn-yard, saws an
exchange, is an old fashion that should
be abandoned. It is inconvenient and
unclean. 1t should go with the wooden
pail and the hairy butter, and never be
heard of any more; gone and forgotten,
too. 1t is a wonder that any farmer
would permit it, and still more Won
der that any farmers wives or daugh-
tets would consent to tn Y. Herald.
1t is an excellent plan to prepare
the cabbage for dinner an hour before
it is time to cook it. Cut the cabbage
in quarters, and scatter handful of
salt over it and cover it with cold water.
This is a good course to pursue if one
has not time to look the cabbage over
carefully. Caulihower also should be
treated in the same way, after being
picked apart. There are SO many
small insects that great care is necessary
in looking over vegetables. -N Z.
Post.
Prof. W. j. Beal, in the Gardeners
Monthly, gives some curious eccentric
tiles peculiar to plants. Roots grown in
damp air in the dark will often make a
complete coil, sometimes two or more
of them. If a piece of gummed paper
be placed on one side of the root tip it
O00oAnOo uuuoudlIy 6AClGeu dHu D6gIuS
to coil away from the paper, sometimes
tying itself into a knot, and often sue
ceeds in rubbing off the paper. Roots
generally turn downward, though not
always.
Never allow any one to tickle
your horse in the STABLE" says the
Farming World ''The animal only
feels the torment and does not under
stand the joke. Vicious habits are thus
easily brought on. Never clean a horse
in the stable; the dust fouls the crib
and makes him loathe his food. Use
the currycomb lightly. When used
roughly it is a source Of great pain.
Let the heels be well brushed out every
night. Dirt, if allowed to cake in,
causes grease and sore heels"
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
''Shake Shtays In"

"My boy Shake he comes big shoke
on me" said a pleasant-faced farmer at
the Gratiot Avenue Station yesterday.
''How was that?"
"Vhell, Shake was RAIDER lazy und
he eat more on der table ash two men.
Last vheek he sthrikes on me fol-
wages"
rs he of agePn
ssOh, no. Shake vhas only sixteen.
/ doan' pellet he can earn his poard nit
any farmer, und so [ tells him / vhas
willing to poard und clothe him, und il
some circus comes along / gif him feefty
cents. Dot vhas goot enough for boy
NIT sooch an appetite. But What you
pellet Shake does?'
81 dunno.n
'sHe comes to town und drinks some
peer und vhas arrested und sent up NIT
der workhouse for seexty days. IF
take him out / hat to bay ten dollar
cash. Dot vhas big shoke on me,
und Shake he laughs all oafer him.
SELF
''Why don't you leave him in there
to serve out his timer He gets his
board and clothes. and you have moth
ing for him TO do at home in the
winter
by Shiminy, but meier fought OF
dot pefore! Dots so-dot's so! Shake
vhas no goot at home, und vhas only
expense on me. If I doan' pay dot
ten dollar den he schtays in
'sAnd the joke is on him."
DOTS dots so. If / take him
out he laugh behind my pack NIT der
poys. If | leaf him in | go oop to see
him once a vheek und make some grins
und ask him how it vhas so far he goes.
Shake shtays in. Ia! ha! hal I vhas
tickled alreadyP'-petr0it Frea hesa
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
They Sold Him a Hole.

He was telling the story in the bis
lard room of Denver hotel. Said he:
There were three Of us, you see, and
Nevada was a cold climate for us. We
were dead broke. half-starved, and clear
discouraged, when along came New
Yorker. He wouldn't play cards,
wouldn't be robbed, and we couldn't
stick him with forged land-patents OF
bogus prescriptions. One day we trailed
out and dug hole into a hill and sailed
it a bit, and rushed back and offered
the New Yorker the big discovery for
So, 1000 cash down "
''And he bit?''
"Took right hold like pair of pin,
GERS. Why, he never even stopped to
beat us down. We made a cool thou
sand apiece and made for Frisco"
"Purty cool thai was"
'Well, dunno. If there was any,
thing cool in that transaction it was the
way that New Yorker hunted up pard.
set miners to work, bought machinery
and took over $4,000 out of that ar
hole inside of eight monthsl May be
we We got over feeling fiat, but | guess
not.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.


--Wilkie Collins, the English novel;
ist, will be sixty years old in January.
-Eugenia Moore, of Omaha. died
just before the day set for her wedding,
and was buried in her bridal dress.
Mr. E. P. Whipple. who twenty
odd Years ago was the most popular
essayist in America, and who was
known as .sWhipple, the Essayist,' is
now seldom seen outside his Boston
house. 'He is sixty-four years old
Boston Transcript.
Mr.. Blaine gets from the publish
ers of his new book $50, 900 cash down
and royalty of Is GEMS. volume.
There are advance orders for 100, 900
copies, and it is expected that fully
| 300, 900 will be sold. This would yield
the author $4,000 in aH-N. 7. Trib-
uaae.
Miss Emily Thompson, reigning
belle of Roanoke County, Va, was mar
ried the other day to Napoleon B. Aims
worth, he being a full-blooded Choctaw
Indian, college graduate and success
full lawyer. The strangely-mated pair
have gone to Indian Territory to live
Chicago Times.
Mr.. John Wanamaker, the great
dry-goods merchant of Philadel phia,
has resigned the Presidency of the
Young Mems Christian Association of
that city, which he has held for thir-
teen years. During that time he has
contributed to its funds about 800, 900.
Philadelphia Press.
Miss Bertha Crowley, a sixteen
year-old girl of Deposit, n. Y, always
supposed that she was Bertha Crowley
until the other day she learned that her
father, General j. J. Byrne, had, when
her mother died, placed her in the Crow
ley's care and had himself died recently
in Texas, and left her a $4,000 estate.
N Y Sun.
DIR. Phillip Livingstone Jones, a
Brooklyn physician, was reported to be
worth about$1 100000. According to his
will, offered for probate recently, he is
worth only about $1,000, but it is
thought he had forgotten that he was
the owner of several valuable pieces OF
suburban property, being very absent
minded about everything except matters
relating to his profession. Brooklyn
| (N. ~ Eagle.
1t is said of Charles Hazewell, late
one of the editors of the Boston I4'ov-
eller, that he knew the 5000 books in
his library as mother knows her child.
He could repeat the ''Scarlet Letter.
word for word, from lid to lid. But his
greatest feat of memory was to repeat
the soyereigns of England from the old
| Danish days to Victoria, giving the
number of children each had, the dates
of their birth and death, and the entire
collateral connections.
The death is announced in Paris OF
the wife of John Russell Young, Minis
ter to China. Mrs. Young was a niece
of the late Governor Marshall Jewell,
of Connecticut. She was married about
two years ago, and journeyed to China
with her husband. She was taken i'll,
and was on the continent for her health.
She was alone in Paris, having no one
with her but babe few weeks old,
and her nurse and maid. She was a
brilliant conversationalist, and was
greatly admired for her talents and
beauty. N y Times.
1
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
HUMOROUS.

The man who sleeps on an old
fashioned feather bed generally feels
down in the mouth in the morning.
Burlington Free Press.
In order that your husband NAV
not forget to bring in coal, place the
bod near the door where he can fall
over it. = Chicago Tribune.
-"Ohl he's green hand" re-
marked book-agent, contemptuously.
"He thinks that he can sell books, and
ne has not yet learned the first princi-
pies of the business. Only yesterday
he was picked up all in heap at the
bottom of astairway. Now, an expe-
rienced book-agent always lands on his
feet"
-"Jakey," cried Mrs. Rosenberg, as
she discovered twenty five letters in her
sons bureau drawer, ''here vas all desc
letters gif you since last spring, to
put the mail-box derein" w for hat
you forgot demP' $50 hellup me I
don't forgot emp replied Jakey. II
been yaitin' for dot dwo-cent bostager'
-ArItG7aSG90 Traveller.
"A rural young lady visited the
Philadelphia Geological Garden, and
when she returned home she told her
mother that one of the monkeys spoke
to her. A girl who can't distinguish
a dude from a monkey should be given
few lessons in natural history. The
monkey is the most intelligent-looking
but doesn' wear such ridiculous clothes.
philadelphia Record.
The various phases of the tender
passion have thus been exemplifed: A
ship is foolishly in love when she is at
tached to buoy; she is prudently in
owe when she leaves the buoy for the
pier; she places Der affection beneath
her when she is 'ancoring after heavy
swell, and she is desperately in love
when sheis tender to man-of-war.
The Judge.
"A remarkable climate: A Northern
tourist, engaged in looking up the title
to some Texas lands, was Sitting in his
room at the hotel. A colored waiter
came in with some clean towels.
"What kind of weather is there out
side?" inquired the man lis iterain-
ingp' "Yas, sah," answered the wait
er. "De fac is, mos all de weather
we has in Texas is on de outside. We
doan git much wedder on de inside, dat
is, no hebby wedder. ''-Tecas Sittings.
She laid her head upon his shoulder
as he held her close to his bosom. Her
eyes beamed love, etc., into his. "Do
you love me, Alphonso?n eyes, sweet
est. ;, Then why delay naming the
dayP" 81 will not delay, love. It will
be some pretty day in the next spring
time when the flowers are budding
forth in beauty and delightful
fragrance" "Oh, pshaw! Why, Will
Jones said he'd marry me next week.
But if you can beat that time, dearest,
I am yours, for I love you so much.
Alphonso took his hat and retired from
the race.-M 7. Graphic.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
THE HUBBUB or THANKSGIVING
DAY.


a din and discord is Thanksgiying-Day,
With its preaching and pudding, its pottage
ana play;
Its country reunions a-near and afar,
Afoot and on horseback, by carriage and car:
Inc merchant and farmer, mechanic and tar
Whoever the wandering prodigals are; -
The lean aud the brawny, the blind and the
To eat chicken-pie and give thanks for the
samel
Pack baggage and go to bed early at night,
Resolved to turn out at the first peep of light,
Then rise, at the dawn with cold in your
And gcold at the servant and grumble at
Since midnight all sleep from your pillow has
fled,
For the baby had scattered bed-crumbs in the
Then rush to the depot-while children all
With trunk, parcel, handbook, umbrella and
bag.
"All aboard" -MatiIdas lost one of
But Bob has the bird-cage and ma has the
blues.
And Jane has the humps, and Jerusha has
That some bag or box has been left in the
And the baby has fun, for the sweet ittlo
Drops its hat out the window and plums in its
ear,
And pa growls the tickets are under his
foot:
"Dear SUI 1 do wonder where them has been
putt"
To church, Now the preacher expands with
his theme,
And the old deacon curls in his corner to
dream.
To the tablet First, pious grandfather says
grace
Preceding great the epicurean race;
Then turkeys and pigs disappear in their
place,
And uddings rehectin each satisfied face;
iii baby has butter on four Of his toeses,
And eight of the children show grease on
their nosesl
Q day of our daysl OF our system the SUM
Thou grim, Eankeehed conservation of fun!
The prayer of the Scotch or the dish of the
Dutch;
my pilgrims repent if they cat overmuch.
On, long may thy worshipful devotees come
From East and from West, and where'er they
may roam,
TO tenderer call than the roll of the drum
AND blest be the hurry of prodigals homel
AND 6lest be the clamOr Of children at play
ana Dlest be the hubbub Of Thanksgiving
W. A. Croflt, in ". Y. GRAPHITE.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
Youths Department.
LITTLE LAUp,s STORY

Tn going to tell you a story
It's nice, know youth say;
Not an old tale
Worn out and stale
Imade it myself to-day.
There was once a bee-yoo- tiful Princess
OF, ever so long agol
when fairies and Kings
md all such things
Were common enough, YOU know.
An. oh, she was awfully loveIyI
With eyes as blue as the sky;
Slender ald fair,
With losss light hair,
And aseut as'hig as /.
Butch, sAe was awful unhappy!
And if ever she smiled at all,
Twas once in awhile,
4 weak little smile,
When she played with her Paris doll
For she had such terrible teachers!
and lessons she colld not bear;
And she hated to sew.
And she hated-oh.
she hate1 TO colab her hairi
Well one day. she wandered sadly
Ina dark and dismal dell:
When, do you know,
She stubbed her toe,
And tumbled into welll
The well was wet and Shiny,
And dark and muddy and deep.
But the frogs below
They pitied her so,
They scraped the mud in q heap.
And then they dubbed together,
And a toad-stool tall they made:
And safe on that
The Princess sat,
And waited for mortal aid.
And she, to keep from crying,
And her anxious fears disable,
Repeated fast.
From first TO last,
Her multiplication-table.
And all the songs and verses
she lad ever learned to say,
Books she had read,
Pieces she'd said,
+ And the lessons of yesterday.
Now, Prince there came a-riding,
In the forest thereabout;
When he saw the fair
Maid sitting there,
OF course, he helped her out.
And, of course, they rode together,
Till they reached the palace gate,
Where they alighted,
Their tale recited
And the wedding was held in state.
~. n. Gol0, in st. Nicholas.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16
Recipe for Sauer-Kraut.

As the season has come when almost
every family-and we may say with
considerable certainty every farmer S
family-puts up for the winter tub Of
sauer-kraut, we offer again our recipe
for preparing this excellent and whole
some dish. We regard our way the best
so far as our knowledge goes, and no one
we are sure will be disappointed who
adopts it. 1t is this:gs''In the first place
let your stand, holding from half bar
rel to barrel, be thoroughly scalded
out; the cutter, the tub, and the stamp
er also well scalded. Take off all the
outer leaves of the cabbages, halve
them and remove the heart, then pro-
ceed with the cutting. Lay some clean
leaves at the bottom of the stand, sprin-
kle with handful of salt, fill in half a
bushel of cut cabbage, stamp gently
until the juice just makes it appearance,
then add another handful of salt and so
on until the stand is full. Cover over
with cabbage leaves, place on top clean
board fitting the space pretty well, and
on the top of that stone weighing
twelve or fifteen pounds. Stand away
in a cool place, and when hard freezing
comes on move to the cellar 1t will be
ready for use in from four to six weeks.
The cabbage should be cut tolerably
coarse. The Savoy variety makes the
best article, bnt it is only half as pro-
ductive as the Drumhead and Flat
Dutch" We will just add that there
is no dish more wholesome than we'll
made sauer-kraut: but it should always
be boiled, and well boiled, with a piece
of picked pork or corned beef. Ger
naGptoU7s Telegraph.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16

-Nota single city in the United States
has accommodations for its school pop
ulation.-N. 7. Epdepende1lt.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16

Kentucky people are disguised be-
cause well-to-do travelling English
man asked Judge Harlan who Henry
Clay was.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16

"A Uass County (Mo) boy drank 9
pint OF whisky to counterfeit the sRepf
Of 0 suake bite. He died.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16

Mr.. E. E. Conklin, of the Knicker-
booker Ice Company, has expressed to
a reporter of the Albany EUeniaag Jour
nal the opinion that not less than $780,
600 tons of last winter ice harvest re-
main in the store-houses along the Hud-
son. The companies are buying up all
the old ice they can find in expectation
of an open winter. They make this
prophecy boldly, for was not the wind
in the south when the sun crossed the
line? And isn't that an infallible sign
that south winds viii prevail during the
next sixmonthsP
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-11-16

Tip plants Of raspberries should b
get out 10 the spging.
Arkansas weekly mansion., 1883-12-08


liN" been gi3uriu.r o.: e.ine Of ti.r
figure tn the i..flH,rlni'-c' :,.UaYr. . the
Pn~tniG~i" q alIeF,tt. -t;i.ij.v for tie nUrnCs.
% r..-tTI -iI.'" fHo aciftliI q. ia .t.'~s:t
yTttH !H' lt;r, IA. i tt.- of f..0 ii-"- i-.,E
,,Yv hay" " ..,"'. 80 ..'-- .- -a- 'fE.'-. - IA"
>iUi..G "y r'rr I.."., IA ~ f.r-- ".' - ti.-
"T9t.p3-. t..- vutIr r-rn...--.o e.. tEo i"p3gt-
meat d." - ser" l.t.'-.2@ -. white ir~i
wear 49," hai -vvii..n - .:.-c t"TE SD
0"o,H". thC state -: : IVY E,'i. .'Ha" yttii-
ed h;jt -, ia ED q. e.. last I,r. -y .'tgl-
tritIt"H i.rtZa a:It a.. ana tts 'ruf ii II.
earned ny III" government IN Ih@ .Ifpift
>tr'r rN + 'Hr expense '' operating 'ttc
mai -N~t: ~ were lest yeay : .iGp,G0n. OHIO
u lS2H gave 10 tne government a revenue
of @3G,413. N.chi- II lave $500 Il. aud
Illinois Clipped IN the astonishing aIa"Jint
Of &, 900 - i:orC was thr Grcat Chicago
in those days: The New York post Office
pmpl0Ved eight CLERK :. and ii Was the boaat-
lUl pride OF the newspapers OF tic dag TO
filrnis sh the Statistics showing that teT"@ N
10 ,000 and jG.0.n letters passed ibrou%h the
New York Office every week! Now IhF
New York office employs SEQ clerks, two
thirds of whom are III :hC letter Ii prftment. ..
and tie average HiuoiIut % man matter
passing through the office is .tVeEfE tons.
Last wear the carriers delivered s. h'i.o. q
letters and almost l.; 0ihi.t01 postal raF't5. 10
say nO;hlu.. of 800 .lGU registered ie': :eg-.
the average number @! letters ro.lectcd hE
these carriers j. 4i;; .0t1 per year or more
than / .:.ua per day for each carrier And
there i one man ia tie Office haric.
foTrcS.eT-z,.yh ho has watched 1cI Wt!fSd
and worked through. all iuiS astonishing
progress. II" bcyan ,s a cirTk and stu re-
mains clerk at the a~a Of tour core years.
and no ciNIi service l--s SaId 10 him ''coi.Te
up highe:
JI-NIVS
Arkansas weekly mansion., 1883-12-08
A. n. f. ZION CHURCH

Next Sabbath will he The first
quarterly y meeting of this confer
ence year. The forenoon will he
taken up with addresses by the
following named gentlemen OF
Little Rock: j idge + L Vaughan
Judge Carroll. Judge j " Mars
tin. Lawyer Perkins, DIR. Smith,
and Mr.. 6 + ZONES.
Preachiu" ut > clock, u m,
by Mr. q +. Jones. Also, at !
O clock p m, by the pastor, Elder
& II prosser. After which the
presiding cider. r p Johnson,
will administer tho sacrament.
All are invited to attend.
& L PEOssER. Pastor.