The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-10-06
HANGING A PICTURE.
Mr.. spoopendyke's Disastrous Failure in
that Line.

prancing into the stting-room with every
evidence of delight and contentment pic
tured on his face. ''Now my dear, what do
you think I've brought your
Pm sure l have no idea" fluttered Mrs.
Spoopendyke, gazing anxiously on the flat
package Mr.. Spoopendyke carried under his
arm. at isn't a new silver salver for the
water-pitcher, is it?'
"You hit what it isn't, the very first
whack, Mrs. Spoopendyke. 1t never had
any notion of being anything of the sort,
demonstrated Mr. Spoopendyke with some
severity. If you can't guess any better than
that, I'll take it back to the man and get
my money"
off it was done up in a box l should
think it was the shawl 1 told you about"
hazarded Mrs Spoopendyke. 81 don't think
they would do a shawl up in bundle like
that, would they?'
"They might replied Mr. Spoopendyke,
calmly brushing his WHISPERS. You never
can tell what these shop-keepers will do when
they get started"
"Oh, my dear, you don't mean to say you
have brought me that shawl and Mrs;
Spoopendyke made . spring for her husband
and wound her arms around his neck.
Let up gurgIed Mr.. Spoopendyke,
wrenching himself loose. eff I ever intended
to give you the shawl you have busted tine
project now. Think Pm going to bring home
an executioner in the shape of measly shawl
and run the risk of being choked to death Tor
it?''
'Then it isn't the shawl" sighed Mrs.
Spoopendyke somewhat disappointed but
still overcome with curiosity. please tell
me what it is for l know it is something
nice"
Look" grinned Mr. spoopendyke, un-
wrapping the package and developing
cabinet photograph of himself nicely framed
in guilt. Don't that beat all the shawls in
the market? How do you like it?' and Mr..
Spoopendyke held it out at arms length
and admired it hugely.
| isn't it perfectly splendid"' gulped Mrs.
Spookendyke, choking little. at is the
| best likeness of you | have ever seem Did
| you get it for me?'
"Of course" replied Mr.. Spoopendyke,
still buried in admiration of his counterfeit.
w on don't imagine l got it for the rats, do
| you? Haven't any kind OF a notion l
brought it home to kill bugs with, have you?
l thought you might like it, and so went
and had it taken. Now where can we hang
| it?''
II don't know" murmured Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, with her finger to her lips and her
mind still on the shawl. why wouldn't
that space between the two windows be a
good placer"
''Why wouldn't the top shelf of the pantry
| be better?' groWled Mr. Spoopendyke. IF
you are hunting sor place where the light
won't strike it, why not put 1t under the car
pet, or stick it between the mattresses? This
picture demands some refulgence to show it
off, and Pm going to put 1T where the most
| refulgence is calculated to strike 1t. NOW,
| where can we put it?'
Isn't that q good place, right over the
bed?" suggested Mr.. Spoopendyke, who be-
gan to see that her husband was aiming for
the chimney piece where the painting of her
| father was hung for years. "If you hang 1T
over the bed, | can see it whenever l come
| into the ROOM"
Just So" snarled Mr.. Spoopendyke run
ming a cord through the eyes in the back of
the frame. And if l hung it on your back
you could see it every time you turned
around to see how your measley dress fitted
| Ii l was particularly anxious for you to keep
it within your vision all the time I'd put it
under the bed, where it would confront you
| whenever you started in on a hunt for burg
| lars. l don't know, though" he continued,
as brilliant idea occurred to him. You
like that place between the two windows
best, don't you? | don't know but what that
is a good place for picture"
BEST place in the ROOM" giggled Mrs
| Spoopendyke, satisfied that she had carried
| her point and saved the location sacred to
her father. If | were going to have my pic
ture hung in this room, shouldn't hear to
the two windows" and Mrs. Spoopendyke
pursed up her lips as one who declined to
recede from her proposition under any cir
cumstanCes.
| Then I'll tell you what We'll do" said
Mr.. Spoopendyke with a CLEAN of specula-
picture up there, and 1 will be content to
take the subordinate place over the chimney
piece. That makes it pleasant all around,
and no one has right to object"
Mrs. Spoopendyke saw she had been
caught in her own trap, and made no further
resistance.
Where's the step-ladder?" asked Mr..
Spoopendyke, cheerfully. Bring me the
portable Tower of Babel, and l will fresco
this wall with the finest of modern artistic
efforts"
Mrs. spoopendyke lugged the step-ladder
upstairs, and Mr.. SpOOpendyke, having ar
ranged his string mounted to take down the
old gentlemans picture with view to the
proposed removal.
look out you don't fall, dear" suggested
Mrs. Spoopendyke, forgetting her defeat in
her solctude for her husband.
That's all right" smiled Mr. Spoopen-
dyke from his perch. You just quit roost-
ing on that bottom round like hen, and
will get on without any further trouble"
Mrs. Spoopenpyke jumped off the ladder, but
her dress caught on the step, and down came
Mr. Spoopendyke like a bundle of soiled
clothes, rolling on the carpet and trying to
get clear of the ladder that had rolled after
him and mixed itself up with him so that ii
was difficult to tell which was which.
What did you let go for?' yelled Mr..
Spoopendyke, trying to get his elbow out of
his mouth and still struggling with the lad
der. Didn't tell we to hold on? Think
don't know now to gel off 9 ladder when
get ready? S'pose I want ladder turned
bottom upwards when l want to get down?
Take it off, he roared, satisfying himself
that he was powerless. "If you wont to see
ladder climb up Spoopendyke, stand me up
against the wall and give me a show. bod
CAST that ladder' and he rammed his legs
between two of the rounds in his efforts to
free himself and finding one leo canoht