National Republican., 1883-11-15
"How DEM SNAKES CAME HEAH."
Uncle Eph's Account OF the Advent OF
serpents In America.
Nc,D YORK. TsiegraDi

NGtO York 7eiegrdni
Uncle Eph, on whose Uranium tho whit
ened wool of near three score and ten hard
winters stood erect sat the other morning by
the barrel stove in q barber shop, says the
Cincinnati Enquirer. Business was dull and
somebody ask ed how snakes ever came TO this
country. Then Uncle Eph spoke up and
said
"Thar's some secret history in dat 'speo
you young bucks don't know muffin bout an
now, rs you has aggravated the question, I'll
tell yer what my old Congo muddor dun tole
me. Yer sec, ober dar snakes is kinder gods.
Dey worship ON; don't kill EN- like dey do
nowadays, but feed ON in temples and take
good care on 'em. DE snakes dey lSnowed dis,
an would bite black men, but if black
man was attacked, why snakes fto for him
list like dog for his master, WALL one day.
great many hundred years ago, do devilsh
Portugees mad been terrible bad on de Congo
coast, and carried of several shiploads chock
full of poor black folks and sold 'em for
slaves. Thar came one night big ship dat
dey seed about sundown, and eberybody
know'd it was slave ship, and dat more
niggors would bo stole next day SO dc
priests and chief men goes into dc snake
house and talks this here thing ober What
could dey dor Dc snakes lays oil round
sleeping wild dcrc bellies full, but dey hecrcd
all dat was said, and dey put up job. Dey
crawlod out of do place into dc darkness and
down to de ocean; dey jumped in (for snakes
swim like fish, and made for de ship. Of
course de crew was all takin' q sleep, as dey
for do next day. Making no noise,
dey crawled up dc ships chains,
over dc gunwaes, and great big
cobra grabs de man on watch and stung him
to death in q second. On come dc rest of de
serpents, big and little snakes, and dcy just
took possession of de ship. Dey crawled down
do hatchway, foun' all de crew IN dc fore
cabin; tho boas squeezed 'em to death, de
vipors spit on 'em and pizenod ON, aud dc
rnttlesnakes bit 'om like de debil. Course
dey died afore dey knowed what hit 'em.
Dcy got hOl Of do capen and officers and
stung ON down like mad. Den dcy dragged
do corpses up on deck and hung em to do
spars, do yard arms, and cross bars Do cap
ting dey hung to de jobboom on de larboard
side. Every snake took 'ticular pleasure in
sticking his sting and pizen into de corpes.
De weather was terrible hot-'twas right on
dc 'quator-and when de people woke up on
de shore dey looked out at de shin and
doan see nobody movin' about dey won
dered whar Portugees gone to, but 'spose dey
get drunk and doan woke up yet. Oh, but
de snakes was habiu' high ole time! Dey
foun' some Holland gin on board, and Lord
how dcy Tapped it up? Den dey got mad and
dey grabbed de cOrpses and mopped up de
floor of dc deck wild em and frowed 'em up
in dc sails, and danced ruun Kissing and
raisin' de dobil. De wind blew like SER
rocco back to do shore, and made dc women
and children sick, and de dogs to howl, and
do buzzards to come and flap roun'. Last
storm cum up, one of dose litnin' and thun-
der storms dat dey have dere. De old ship
rocked and squeaked and swayed round dc
ocean like q feather in a gale. De snakes
clung to de masts and let her have plenty of
les room. An old boa constructor reared upon
his tail, and hisscd out his orders to de
oder snakes: Reef de sails Man de
topmasts,' Let go de flying jibboom."
"Oh, what are you giving us? Snakes can't
talk" shouted one of the BARRIERS. Old Eph
rose from his chair. Look heah, young man,
you say dc Bible lie? You get out hcah.
Doan de Bible say de snake says to the
woman, Eat dat apple and didn't she eat it?
Well, guess if q woman could undcrstan'
snake, and mind him, dat de snakes know
dere own language. Well, the snakes set sail,
and dey sailed de blue seas ober. De storm
wen down and the ship gone clear out of
sight Dere was plenty to eat on board And
when de odder ships coming long see dis ship
dey thought it was pirate ship, and de stink
of de corpses was so great dat de birds died
dat flew ober de ship, and dc sharks even had
n stomach ache. Well, dat voyage lasted 396
days by dc quadrant, and at last dey landed
on dc coast of Florida. Do snakes disem-
barked and spread themselves all over both
North and South America" I.