Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Anacortes, Wash. Ter.) 1882-1887, 1883-12-08
QuIps.

Could the pitcher of baseball team
be spoken of as ''the power behind the
thrown?'
In the days OF Pharaoh "the darkness
that might be felt" was probably a
slouch hat.
If those who make up theater pa ties
were real polite they would allow the
persons OF the stage to do the talking.
The thief who stole watch at pub
lie meeting excused himself on the plea
that he was only taking minutes of the
affair"
A young lady, who has probably had
reason to doubt the veracity OF the
male biped, says patches of lies are only
equaled by lies OF patches.
Mrs. Malaprop says that the increase
of morality from Egyptian cholera is so
great that it is high time for the doctos
to find an anecdote against it.
One of the symptoms of exhaustion
from overwork is loss of memo y. A
st. Louis drummer claimed that he was
worked too hard, and in order to prove
it cited an instance OF having forgotten
10 take drink before breakfast one
morning.
\ tramp reached into the pantry win
dow Of an out-oi-town house the other
night and tried to steal a pound of but
ter, but it was so strong it drew him in
and whistled for the dog. The tramp
VOWS that he will never tackle any more
county butter.
| in Il triangular fight at Chicago this
! week, one man was knocked down nine
times, and another six, by the muscular
antagonist who had undertaken to whip
| them both. They must have fancied
that they were knocked into the middle
oi next week--it WAS so very like
knocked-ober day.
There is all old family custom in
Switzerland, hailowed by centuries,
which ailayS irritation in the heart
forthwith, maintaining peace there-a
custom blessed by God, and more likely
than any other to keep family together
The last to 90 to bed, whether husband
or wife, recites aloud the Lords Prayer.
"Does a goose lay eggs" inquired
Rollo, one brisk morning in breezy
March. And Roilo's Iather, sitting be-
hind the stove, eating luinluc with
spoon. and trying to shake his whole
skeleton out OF his pockets, made re-
ply: "Yes, my son, ague slays every
hing. it has slain YOUR father"
Native Ito visitor from the South:
"Ah, you've donned the kilt Quite
k ling, | declare! But why do you
wear the Macdonald tartan when your
name is Thompson Little T. (wLo
has been getting good deal OF chafD:
"F'r good resemblance ! paid fer
it. fRetires in huff.
A poem going the rounds begins with
the assertion that "the golden rod is yell
low" OF course it is. II wouldn't be
golden il it were blue. The poem
further says "the com is turning brown"
But it doesn't say whether Brown trod
on the co n. We know some men who
tu,n when their CONS are trodden on.
Who held the pass OF Thermopyle
against the Persian host?" demanded
the teacher. And the editors boy at
the foot of the class spoke up and
said: "Father, reckon; he holds an
annual on every road in the country
that runs passenger ain" He went
up head-aiter the rest OF the class went
home.
"What makes you think your father
was crazy at the time of executing his
last testament" asked the Judge of
witness in contested will case. Be
cause answered the young man,
promptly, "my father was dyei-in-
the-wool Democrat, and he was always
talking about the necessity OF running
the 'old ticket again"
A small boy will dance on chestnut
burrs and broken bottles and Iun airily
over wheat-feld just after the wheat =
has been cut, and think nothing Of it;
but let the point of nail work up lit
tie way through the heel of his shoe and
he howls and limps and thinks it is
sufficient cause for him to remain away
from school.
go Grannie, Grannie"' exclaimed
Brooklyn boy, glancing up from the
paper which he was reading. Java has
been visited by shower of fire."
Dear me-" returned the old lady, not
exactly catching the full import of the
communiGat. on, "dear me, you don't
tell me SO? Well, thought the coffee
this morning tasted a little burnt"
A lady stood patiently before the re-
ceivipg teller's window in bank the
other day, but no one took any notice
OF her till she attracted the attention of
the money-taker by tapping with her
parasol on the glass. "Why don't you
pay attention to me'' she asked, pet
ulantly. az am sorry, ma am, but we
don't pay anything here; next window
please was the polite response.
A iond Cincinnati father tells o. his
four ycar-old boy who was pres, MED
with a trumpet, with which he was
greatly infatuated. All day the boy
footed away delightedly, and at bed
time when his grandmother told him to
put the trumpet down and say his
prayers, the little fellow said: "Oh, no,
III tell you what lets do, gryn'ma you
pray and I'll keep OH blowing.
A Chicago paper says: "Ncarly eyary-
body who lives at Newburg, N. y, ls
moe OF less bowlegged from walking
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