Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-09-19
Buffers Brigade.

On one occasion the regiment was
camped in Union neighborhood, and
an order was issued that no rails
should be burned. Buffer considered
this all wrong, and to be treated with
contempt. Every night he built a
rail fire in secret, and warmed HIM
self with rare enjoyment. Other
members of the company seeing that
Buffer escaped detection or punish
ment, determined to build rail fires
also. And finally the next company
did tbs same. All went well for a
time. Every night as soon as it was
dark the boys would steal off to dis
tant fence, each man shoulder his rail
and slip into camp. One night as the
two companies left to secure their
supply of rails, the colonel then in
command of the brigade received
notice of the raid. He ordered out
two companies of another regiment,
and as the boys came slyly to COM
pany quarters they were put under
guard. Then when all were in, about
sixty in number, they were marched,
each man carrying his rail, to brigade
headquarters and ordered to march
back and forth for two hours, each man
to keep his rail on his shoulder.
Buffers eyes twinkled at this order.
He marshaled the indignant or dis
consulate men in company form and
paraded in regular marching order.
He so arranged that in turning one
man should left face and his pardner
right face, so that the rails should
crash together. There was of course
a terrible racket. Buffer initiated
the colonel in given orders, making
his voice ponderous and his accent
strong, and marching his battalion oc-
cassionally so near headquarters as to
almost touch the tent. The spirit of
mischief made the boys reckless, and
all enjoyed the fun. The colonel fin
ally came out and ordered the men to
stop that noise. Under Buffers in
structions the men moved forward,
not speaking word, but crashing
rails whenever they turned. The col
onel stormed and swore, but no one
needed him. The rail battalion NOV
ed around the little parade ground in
front as sedately as if on drill, paying
no attention to officer or guard. This
continued for many minutes, the COL
onel shouting himself hoarse. AT last
as he left his tent and moved toward
them Buffer shouted: "By the left
flank, march," and then as the line
swept up toward the colonel came the
order: Halt, present arms"
Every rail came down to person,
and the men stood like statues, Buffer
in front. odd you speak, colonel ?
questioned Buffer, in his blandest
tone. 81 should think l did," roared
the colonel. Gle thinks he spoke"
calculated Buffer, in sons of Malta
sepulchral tone.
Turning to the line of men in the
dark, the men alert and audacious,
taking the cue, "He thinks he spoke"
was passed down the line in deep-toned
echo. A dozen men were quick to
catch the spirit of the thing, and bold
in the dark and with disguised voices
they kept "He thinks he spoke" echo
ing in sepulchral rumbles until the
thing became irresistably funny. For
a moment the colonel, astounded at
the audacity of the men and amused
in spite of his anger, was at loss.
Then plunging in at random, he thun-
dered out, "This is disgrace to the
service. You ought, every one of
you, to be in your quarters" Break
ing in upon this speech, Buffer said
in a measured, emphatic, sepulchral
tone, eve ought to be in our quar-
ters," and as it went down the line he
shouted, "all agreed" and down went
the rails and away went the men scat
tering in the dark.
The colonel forgot discipline and
laughed. From a distance came the
sound of Buffers voice, saying, "boys,
he laughs" and then from every di-
rection came the deep-toned echo, "he
laughs" This was succeeded by a
hearty laugh, and the only record of
Buffers fence brigade was the stun
ming array of cedar rails in front of
brigade headquarters. As none of
them were there the next morning,
the colonel inferred that Buffer and
his men had been in action during
the night, but as Buffer remarked,
che couldn't prove it."-Inter Ocean.