The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1883-07-11

the nurse girl to dress the baby up
one evening in some old, dirty baby
clothes, belonging to our wash wom-
ans baby, and we put it IN basket
and placed the basket on the front
door step, and put note IN thee
basket and addressed it to pa. We
had the nurse girl stay out IN front
by the basement stairs, so the boy
couldn't get away, and she rung the
bell and got behind something. Ma
and pa, and uncle Ezra and me were
in the back parlor when the bell
rung. and ma told me to 60 to the
door, and | brought in the basket,
and set it down, and told pa there
was a note in it for him. Ma, she
came ND and looked at the note as
pa tore it open, and uncle Ezra TOOK
ed in the basket and sighed. Pa
read part of the note and stopped
and turned pale, and sat down, then
ma read some of it, and she didn't
feel very well. and she leaned against
the pianno and grated her teeth.
The note was in girls hand writing,
and was like this;
GOLD BALD HEADED PET.-lou
will have to take care of your child,
because | cannot. Bring it up ten
derly. and don't for heavens sake,
send it to the foundling asylum. l
shall 90 drown myeslf.
Your loving,
ALMIRA."
"What did your ma say ?" said
the grocery man, becoming interest
ed.
80. ma played her part well.
Uncle Ezra had told her the joke,
and she said "retch, to pa, Just as
the actresses do on the stage, and
put her handkerchief to her eyes.
Pa said it was ''false, and uncle Ezra
said. 20. brother, that | should live
to see this day" and | said, as |
looked in the basket, pa, it looks
lust like you, and III leave it to ma. .
That was too much. and pa got mad
in a minute. He always gets mad
at me. But he went up and looked
in the basket, and he said it was
some dutch baby, and was evidently
from the lower strata of society, and
the unnatural mother wanted to get
rid of it, and he said he didn't know
any "Almira" at all. When he call
ed it dutch baby, and called at
tention to its irregular features, that
made ma mad, and she took it up
out of the basket and told pa it was
a perfect picture of him, and tried to
put it in pas arms, but he wouldn't
have it, and said he would call the
police and have it taken to the poor
house. Uncle Ezra took pa in a
corner and told him the hest thing
he could do would be to see ''Almira
and compromise with her, and that
made pa mad and he was going to
hit uncle Ezra with a chair. Pa was
perfectly wild, and if he had a gun
/ guess he would have shot all OF US.
Ma took the baby up stairs and bad
the girl put it to bed, and after pa
got mad enough uncle Ezra told him
it was all a joke, and it was his own
baby, that we had put in the basket,
and then he was madder than ever,
and he told uncle Ezra never to dark
en- his door again. don't know how
he made up with ma for calling it a
dutch baby from the Polack settle
ment, but anyway, he wheels 1t
around every day, and ma and pa
have got so they speak again
That was mighty mean trick,
and you ought to be ashamed OF
yourself. Where do you expect to
fetch up when you de-" said the
grocery man.
Il told Uucle Ezra it was q mean
trick" said the boy, ''but he said
that wasn't priming to some OF the
tricks pa had played on him years
ago. He SAYS pa used to play tricks
on everybody. l may be mean, but
never played wicked Jokes on blind
people. as pa did when he was
boy. Uncle Ezra says once there
was a party OF four blind vocalists,
ali girls, gave an entertainment at
the town where pa lived, and they
stayed at the hotel where pa tended
bar. Another thing, 1 never sold
rum, either, as pa did. Well, before
the blind vocalists went to bed pa
caught lot of frogs and put them
in the beds where the girls were to
sleep, and when the poor blind girls
got into bed the frogs hoped all over
them, and the way they got out was
caution.
tits bad enough to have frogs hop
ping all oyer girls that can see, but for
girls that are deprived of thir sight,
and don't know what anything is,
except by the feeling of it, it looks TO
me like pretty tough joke. l guess
pa is sorry now, for what he
did, cause when Uncle Ezra told the
frog story, / brought home frog
and put it in pas bed. Pa has been
afraid of paralysis for years, and
when his leg, or anything gets asleep,
he thinks that is the end of him,
Before bed time 1 turned the con-
versation onto paralysis, and told
about man about pas age having
il on the West side. and pa was ner.
vous, and soon after he retired ]
guess the frog wanted to get &C.
quainted with pa, cause pa yelled
six kinds of murder, and We went
4 into his room. You know how cold
frog is2 Well, you'd dide to see
pa. He laid still, and said his end
had come and Uncle Ezra asked him