Sharp County record., 1883-04-12
A LECTURE ON CLOTHES.

The fourth of The John Spicer course
of lectures was given in the usual
place. Barn Hall, and to the usual audi
ence. Superintendent Dick announced
that the lecture would be upon Clothes,
upon which Jumper, Whistler, and 9th
ers of the boys. and some OF the girls,
were seen to brush their clothes little
as if to brush OF of them anything
which should not be on. Lecturer John
Spicer entered Barn Hall promptly on
time, made his bow, and gave out his
subject
CLOTHES.
1t is very good fun to take off your
clothes and 90 in swimming. APP
plause. Clothes are the tn ngS that
YOU wear They have arms and legs to
them. and ever 50 many button holes
and buttons, and have pockets. Pock'
cts are the best part of your c'othes.
We ha two kinds of clothes, best ones
and old ones. We hang up the best
ones, an wear the old ones. When
YOU wear your best clothes every day
you most always get something on
them. Once | hitched the picket o. a
picket fence into the leg OF some best
clothes and pitched over head first, and
the picket went through, and then | had
to fake that pair for everyday ones,
Gudgeon grease that you get oil of
wheels will not come very well. l do
not mean it will not come off the wheels
very we'll, but off your clothes. Ink
spots stay on, but you can get paint off
if you can get ANYTHING to take it Oft
with. Mud brushes OF when it gets
drv. and your mother doesn't say any
thing when you get mud on your every
day ones, but she does on your best
ones. Sometimes when you 60 to
places you have to stop and change
YOUR clothes, and sometimes you fall
into wet mud and have to 60 home and
take them OIL One time ! had to 90 to
bed and wait for some clothes to dry
that got wet when / was having "dar-
ings" on some thin ice of a great
puddle down in hollow place
when it had been raining and that pud-
die froze over. Laughter. One time
when | was little fellow, when was
going to party with two little fellows
about as big as was, and we had on
our best clothes, we climbed up tree
to see if some b rds' eggs had hatched
out, and dry twig on branch tore a
hole on one side of one of my trouser
legs, and | did not want to 60 back
home because at pair was the best
pair of trousers | had. A big fellow
he was not very big but he was bigger
than we little ellows-he told me to 60
TO the party and keep my hand down
over the hole, and did, and somebody
that was at the party asked me if my
arm was lame laughter, and said
No, ma am; but when the ice creams
came round forgot and took away my
hand to ia e the saucer in it, and that
some one loo ed at it, and laughed
some, and she said: "Oh, now 1 see
what the matter was with your arm"
and laughed little when she did, and
she told me not to thin any more about
the hole then, but to have a good time
and thini about the hole afterwards,
and | did She told me funny story
about hole that was torn. Twill tell it..
Once there was very small Roy named
Gussie, and he tore his clothes most
every dav, and his mother mended them
after he had gone to bed and he did not
see her do it, and he thought the holes
grew up of themselves during the night.
u aughter. And one day when his
little cousin Susie tore her dress her
mother told her not to tear, and cried,
Gussie told her not to cry. for the hole
would grow up again in the night, Just
as holes did in his clothes. And when
Susie went to bed she put her dress over
a chair to have the holes grow up, and
first thing in the morning she went in
her night-gown to look, and her mother
found her standing there crying, and
when her mother asked her what she
was crying for, she said: because that
hole did not grow together in the night.
l tiOuqM it would grow up in the
night" Laughter and applause
know another story 1t is about q
pair of trousers and poor boy. Once
there was very poor boy, and his
mother had no money to buy hin
clothes, and his clothes were very cd
and bad, and the other boys laughe al
this one because he wore that kind Of
clothes. Groans from the audience
and ries of oh! OH! mean! mani
And the boy used to go home from
school and cry because the boys
laughed at him. And his mother said
"No matter if they do laugh at you
That won't hurt you. You just keep tt
your book and learn all you can; that