The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1883-05-16
A Talk with a Dude.

At high noon a youth emerged from
the Brunswick and stood for a moment
in the brilliant blaze of the April sun
lfstlessly buttoning his gloves. He was
languid, sombre and inert.
He was narrow-chested. and his legs
were lank and wavering. On his head
was bell-crowned English beaver, with
| a mourning band two inches wide, and
| around his neck he wore collar of pre-
| posterous hight. A drab covert coat.
such as Englishmen wear when riding
to a meet, was buttoned closely about
his far from robust figure. The gar
ment was so short that the ends of his
spike-tailed coat fell far below it, pro-
dueing weird and eerie effect His
trousers were SO tight that the uneven
contour of his legs inspired pity, and his
feet were squeezed into long and mar
row shoes. Over his breast dangled
single glass and he wore English dogskin
gloves, the color of ripe brick dust. He
held silvertipped cane under his arm
and stood with one foot far in advance
OF the other. His hat was tipped back
on his head, his hair brushed forward
at the sides, and he displayed evil
dences of vapid mustache. But the
most noticeable thing about him was
the expression of his face. He meant to
appear naughty. Instead he looked in
solent.
He was a dude.
Presently another youth swung
around the corner. He was the counter
part of the first, and their attire was
precisely similar, even to the brick dust
gloves. They approached each other
sOlemnly and then the newcomer drawl-
ed:
How are you, my brave boy?"
''Eh? Oh, / cawn't say as I'm too
brisk, don't chew knowP I'm freakish
to-doy.'
t'You look bit queer"
''Yaas I've been in the eating house
here trying to worry down bit of a
chop with some shandygoff How are
you?n
''Ob, I'm fine You know. took q
tub this Tnawning, then fooled me new
cart up the avenue, and had u good APP
petoit for breakfast.
'.Rathah decent fun. -
"Yaas
''See you at the club later
Upon which the newcomer, with a
face expressive of great exhaustion. am
bled away. The first youth still stood
in front OF the hotel and gazed indiffer-
emily about him. For long time he
stood there, while the reporter remain
ed in the background regarding him
with reyerential awe and rejecting that
the dude was the only thing in all the
world that had not been interviewed. A
little time passed and then
II beg Your pardon, said the report |
er.
. 'Ow?n asked the youth slowly.
Il beg your pardon.
'tOh, '.said the youth and after glanc- |
ing casually al the reporter he continued |
placidlv, II don't remember to have |
met You
NO" said the reporter thoughtfully |
while the youth gazed upon him with |
contempt, but / wish to ask |
you a question or two about matter of |
great importance.
.sOh. you don't say! Rather an artful |
idea, I'm sure What did you wish to
ask about?'
The dude "
The youth started, glanced sharply at |
the reporter for au instant and then re-
sumed the air of indifference as he said, |
s.Wellt'
There was widespread rumor down
town that cat chased dude up Fifth
avenue Yesterday at shutdown"
..Oh, l say, said the youth with a
LfstDJ3iI II > dQibc LOO Ustu QOIi
chew know. TO put it upon the-er-aw
dude, V know. loike that. The dudes
not hawf as bad as painted Chased by
, cat -Hawie
mo truth in it at all?''
''Whoy, Id lay quid to bob any
tonne that il a pure guy said the
youth, with some animation; land I'll
Tell YOU what, he continued, ..the-aw
dude. dsal't chew know, is wretchedly
What is a dade?'a
"A dude, answered the youth, slow
8, lis a gentleman. A cad can never
,e dude. He must not be in trade.
'ut must have money. Tdare say there
IRE dudes who have very little money.
,ut then they have blood. y'know. But
he point of the thing is that the dude is
he mbodiment-er-of the-Ah-tri-
lmph of the gentlemen over the cad
lou take what was once known rs q