The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1883-01-25

have seized upon this characteristic OF
man and endowed with it the brute
creation. 1t would be a cheering
spectacle to see an old warty hop-toad
bowling and aspiring to be beautiful
to the young and comely Miss Toadee;
now wouldn't it? It would be exhil-
arating beyond description to see the
masculine land-terrapin vainly en-
deavoring to get brighter burnish
upon his scales in order to please Mrs.
terrapin. Young man, you want to
appear beautiful, and noble, and dig
nlfied in the eyes of somebody's girl,
and you can never accomplish it with
out a mustache, and you aspire to
have that appendage; keep on aspir-
ing; it will come; but when it comes,
that hirsute attachment will be the
product of years and not Of hope.
The learned, in thus attempting to
press a desire for beauty into the
ranks of argument in favor of evolu-
ton, seem totally to overlook some Of
the simplest considerations. Every
peacock is the type of every other pea
cock; every male golden pheasant is
Furnished, and furnished, and adorned
just like every other male golden
pheasant; every turkey gobbler struts
and gobbles just like every other tur-
key gobbler Of his kind. Among the
females of each tribe, in their normal
condition, there is the utmost uni
formity Of attire. [ defy the acutest
observer to point the difference be-
tween two guinea hens Of the same
age. Where is the sportsman that
can find, among his flock of captured
grouse, any difference; any break in
the uniformity Of their plumage?
Why invest the males of the lower
orders alone with desire to be beau
tiful? Why not give the lady brutes
and bugs chance? To. deny them is
a foul slander upon the sex. Our
human ladies are proud and, justly so,
Of their manifold attractions; and
they are deeply anxious to increase
the number of these attractions; con-
stantly upon the alert to cause them
selves to seem more beautiful; and
they call in the aid Of art to polish
off and complete that noble work
which nature has already endowed
with allurements all too sweet. Mark
her; how she plumes, and frizzes, and
decorates, and bangs, and powders,
and curls and annoints She uses
vasoline enough to stock drug store
in order to make her little delicate
hand more soft and plant, her roseate
face more blooming. Is all this done
for fun? Is it for home inspection?
nay, verify! She is going upon the
streets to be seen and admired by
men, and her natural desire is to ap-
pear handsome in their eyes.
Think not, girls, for one moment
that | am imputing blame to you.
On the contrary, if the word of an old
fellow who has lived to see more than
one generation ingulfed in misery, be
any solace, you have that word. 1t is
right that you should care for your
adornments; be proud of your person,
and cultivate your beauty. That
beauty is heavens dowry; the fine
painting Of the center of light; it is
the alluring flag which forces the al
legiance of all men, and the bright
banner before which the most re-
doubtable warriors lower their colors.
| only seize upon your refined sensi-
bilities as the most potent argument
in existence to disprove the fallacy of
evolutionists, by showing their utter
lack Of acquaintance with the methods
of creation-as well as their want of
knowledge touching Gods master
piece of handiwork.
A gain, this proposition of the learn
ed which | am discussing, assumes
that the male sex has no appreciation
Of feminine grace and loveliness. And
now gentlemen, call upon you to
raise your voices in vindication of
mans manhood, and Of masculine
taste. | know your argument: you
will point me to the jewelry, rich and
heavy; the glossy black apparel, the
shiny silk half. the carefully combed
hair, the neatly trimmed whisker, the
delicately nourished but still downy
mustache, and say all this is for her
To my mind she is but little, if any.
lower than the angels, her form is a
sylph, her speech is Of silver, her
laugh distraction, her step queenly;
to me she is more beautiful than
mornings dawn, and [ am compelled
to appear worthier in her sight.
These are homely arguments to
urge against the doctrines of grave
scientists, but they are all powerful;
they are easily comprehended. And
every one Of you know them to be
strictly true The thoughts and feel
49,. III T bovo cIyotobod obovo oro
universal among men-they are nat
ural and primitive, co-existent with US
and coeval with human life, and we
thus find that desire to appear beau
tiful is mutual, existing alike among
men and women.
Look upon the faces here assembled
the lineaments of all the
persons whom you have ever seem
how many Of them look alike? how
many of them present so nearly the
same features that you might mistake
the one for the other? No two Of
them perhaps. And yet the ladies
each will say I have seen many hand
some gentlemen; the men will aver
that they have seen hundreds of beau
tiful women. Beauty with US, then,
does not consist in exact similarity of
feature, but in diversity, hence if our
good looks have been attained by as
piration, each aspirer has had in con-
ception his own individual model,
and as no two men present precisely
the same features, it follows that no
two have aspired alike. Among the
animals, on the contrary, all the males
of species have grown in beauty ex-
aetly in the same degree and hence
their aspirations have been Identical: