Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1883-02-02
C0ENUBIAL DIFFERENCES.

! \ great deal Of matrimonial tribl-
iatlon was brought TO li:ltt in the
last ccnsGs returns. Several hus
bands returned their wives as the
heads Of the families. and one de
scrlbed himself as an idiot for hay
ing married his literal better half.
Married, and I'm heartily sorry for
1t, was returned III two cases; and
III quite number of instances TEN
per was entered under The head of
lntirmities opposite the name of wife.
Confession of this sort, besides being,
as we have already limited. somewhat
lndlscreet, are often also decidedly
supereroSatory. for congenial dissen-
slons, like murder, will out, and that
sometimes IN the most provoking and
untlmely manner Take an illustra-
ton: At a recent fashionable we'd
ding. after the departure of the
happy pair, a dear little girl asked
with chlld's innocent inquisitive-
ness: Why do they throw things
at the pretty lady in the carriage?"
For luck, dear replied one of the
bridesmaids. And why" again
asked the child, " doesn't She throw
them back?' oh" said the young
lady, that would be rude" =" No,
it wouldn't" persisted the dear little
thing, to the delight of her doting pa
rents who stood by; INA does"
Connubial chickering's would often
prove extremely amusing to Il disin-
terested spectator In u" Mrs. eau
dies Curtain Lectures" Douglas
Jerrold has presented us with some
very entertaining illustrations of the
counsels many, sweet, and pre-
cious," besides the sage advices,"
which the dutiful wife bestows upon
her erring lord and master. Poor
Caudle, as rule, thought discretion
the better part of valour, and sought
refuge III the arms Of soothing slum-
bcr; hlt all men arc not of such un
heroic mould or docile temperament,
and do not allow their wives to have
1T all their own way, without at
least an occasional protest. "Do you
pretend to have as good a Judgment
as have" said an enraged wife to
her husband. Well, no." he replied
deliberately; "our choice of part
ners for life shows that my judg-
ment is not to be compared with
yours"
Why is there so much tribulation
in the world? Many reasons might
be stated. Dean Swift says the rea-
son why so few marriages are happy
is because young ladies spend their
time i'll making nets, not in making
cages. But it is manifestly absurd
and unfair to saddle all the blame
upon the wives in this way George
Eliot tells us that marriage must be
Il relation either Of sympathy or of
conquest; and it is undoubtedly true
that much of the matrimonial discord
that exists arises from the mutual
struggle for supremacy They go to
church and say Il WILL and then.
perhaps, on the way home. one of the
other says Il won't" and that begins
it. Some one has said that conjugal
affection largely depends on mutual
confidence. \ friend of ours quoted
this sentiment the other day in the
smoking room, and added that he
made it rule to tell his wife every
thing that had happened, and in this
way they avoided any misunderstood
ing. We'll, sir" remarked another
gentleman present, not to be outdone
IN generosity, you are not so open
and frank as L am. for L tell my
wife good many things that never
happen" "Oh' exclaimed a third,
" l am under no necessity to keep
my wife informed regarding my af-
fairs. She can find five times as
much as know myself without the
least trouble"