The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-07-06
HUMOR.


ton.
A BUG that still continues to thrive
Humbug.
How TO know sail-maker-By the
"cut of his jib."
A SOLDIER who was at loss for
something to write about, was ordered
to right about face"
WHEN are certain persons who travel
in France like dissipated young men?
When they are on the road to Rouen.
WOMAN is regarded by some men az
conundrum. They will rack their
brains over her for awhile and then
give her up.
POSTPONED on account of the weth-
err" as the timid city man said when he
didn't go through sheep-pasture with
belligerent ram holding the fort
THE young gentleman would no doubt
pay ample attention to the wall-howers,
but fact is they can't see them without
liability to the charge of being wall
eyed.
A VENETIAN glass manufacturer is
fabricating ladies' bonnets by the thou
sands, and selling them, too. That style
of bonnet ought to make good looking
'lasses.
HUsBAND-".I want to tell you some
good news L have just had my life in
sured." Wife-"Your life! That's just
the way with you selfish men. You
would never think of having my life in
sured."
"WAs at the club last night; had
bang-up dinner" remarked Tom. "Ah,"
said Charley, "then L suppose you have
fine headache this morning! A head
ache generally follows a stuffed club,
you know"
WHAT dirty coat that isr' said
Mrs. Clearly; at looks as though all
the rag-pickers in town had it on their
backs" "Then. suppose" suggested
Clearly, that you would call it a coat
of many cullers."
Too YOUNG to we'd the brush: Art
list (to young lady who wants to learn
painting)-"How old are you?" Young
lady Artist-"Only
81? Then L advise you to desist. You
may still succeed in getting hus-
band
AN old song revised:
What is a ship without sail?
Adieu, my lover, ad1eu
What is monkey without a tailr
dude, my lover, dude.
WHATS IN A NAME?
Down in a quiet country town,
Where nature seldom seems TO frown,
There is churchyard, small and neat,
Close by the little village street;
And there's a gravestone, washed with tears,
On which Is caryen, Aged 2 years.
The name? How vain cognomens are!
The name did read. "Methuselah.
-NetC YORK Advertiser,
TwIsTEM, who was gazing sadly at
the door which had just closed behind
a bookragent, was heard to dreamily
remark Can any one tell me the
difference between that agent and the
entrance to O stable?" zones barn
door and the others a darned BORE
Pittsburgh Telegraph
London Truth says that donkey is
infinitely better eating than beef Or
mutton. "There. are, however, good
many persons who could not eat donkey
without exposing themselves to the
charge of cannibalism," says the Chi
cago Times. The first thought of
Chicagoan is always for himself
Boston Post.
UNFORTUNATE little Levi: why so
gloomy this morning, Jacob% "Ah,
my poor leetle Penjamin Levi-he is
tead!" Dead? You surprise me.
How did 1t happen 2" well, you see,
nv leetle Peniamin he vas at der syna-
gogue to say his prayers, and poy put
in his head at der toor and CRIES: JOB
Lott and leetle Penjamin-he vas gilt
in der crush Life.
LIVING AND LOVING.
gay little maiden with dark brown eyes.
us sn IN sse es spps 8 RoSn Ssgsh
Building a nest, trow.
What is life? What is love?" sang the maiden
fair
Robin, o Robin. thrilling up there,
What will you answer now?
Never was maiden 80 happy as she,
Never did birdie sing sweeter than he,
And never did oracle truer word give;
What is living but loving-to love - TO liver
-Mdnhattdn Magazine.
LITTLE JOHNNY WIsEHEAD has slip
ped into chair at the card-table
designed for a guest who has not yet
made his appearance. While Waiting
for the delinquent one of the guests
deals hand around the table, much to
Johnny's delight. Johnny-"But we
didn't cut 'em, sir" One of his fathers
guests (patronizingly)-@Oh, my little
man, we know each other so well that
it is unnecessary to go through that
form" Little Johnny Wisehead-"But
Uncle Jack told me just exactly differ
ent. was on the stairs watching you
and papa play last night, and when
Uncle Jack came down the stairs L
asked him why you always cut the pack
before dealing, and he said he guessed
cause you knew each other so well.
Didn't you, Uncle Jack ?"