Seattle daily post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, W.T. [Wash.]) 1881-1888, 1883-09-08
ROBHixc FOE FIN.
The way . Party Of Eaxfish Tourists
Were made 60 Execute q Fancy
Dzae~ In the National Park.

The way . Party Of Ensiish Tourists
Were Made 90 Execute q Fancy
Dzae~ In the National Park
Helena IDdepeLdent
Uncle Rufus Hatch is jolly old soul
and a lover of practical jokes. He
played one on some of his guests in the
National Park the other day, which was
greatly enjoyed by erybody except the
victims.
/, came absut ia this way: In the
excursion purity which be brought out
to Wonderland last week were several
Eagllshnen. Il is characteristic of
Johnny Bull to look With contempt ap-
on everything American. and to braR
aS1at their own national provess.
Well. these particular En2lishmen
lssells, principally were RECALLED by
such old timers as they encountered
with tales about Montana road agents,
and trse TO the national instinct the
foreigners asserted that in America We
don't know. to deal With such fellows,
700 know. Oae Of them ssid
% Az, nsw. We kn4v, We don't seem 10
hundsrstawnd vat perfvect covahds
these fellahs are, We knaw. The hoDly
way to dispose hof them pvoperly is
like we tgavelehs do with the banditti
of Euvope. Shoot q few hof thets, We
knaw. They cawn't stawnd that. and
you'd soon dxive them hout of the
kwolutvy."
With this view of the case the other
Britishers agreed. Uncle Rufus Vas
within hearing, and smi.ed. lie didn't
smile for nothing. He had a scheme.
In tue afternoon the Englishmen
went up the gulch about half mile
from the hotel t. btthe in a natural
pool stu ted there. This was uatch's
opportunity. Taere were several COW
soys of the wild aud woolly sort in the
vicinity, and RIfus hired them to 60 up
TO where the Englishmen yer. bathing,
and give them taste of Western high
way robbery.
fhe Englishnen had jest dis-obed
and gone into the water when five Wild
land to them desperate-lo,king horse
men came ro1nd point within a few
rods of the pool, swinging their six
shooters and whooping. while their
csyuses m tde the earth quake with
their gallopin2. The desperaioes
charged straight al the btt1efs, and
the air above the pool was Kissing with
bullets.
And what did tho valiant subjects of
the Queen do {? Did they spring to
their clothing. pail their pops, and lay
the desperadoes low in death ? No.
Did they stand their ground, laugh a.
danger, and DEFY the beastly Hamer-
icaa cowahhs r. Ne. They did not
even do that. They dove! That's
what they did
When they finally stuck their noses
out for breath of air, the cowboys had
d,smounted and were standing by the
| pile Of clothing, one of them going
through the pockets for watches and
wallets, while the other four covered
the pool with their revolvers.
| As soon rs the Englishmen stuck theiI
heads above the water they were calico
| upon 10 stand up and hold up theiI
hands They obeyed, without reflect
ing for moment how easy it would bt
To "dwive the wascals hout of the
kwountwy." There WAS silence for 3
few nouents while the booty was being
secured After this Was accomp ishet
the cowboys consulted a moment, and
then. mounting their cayu,es, levelet
their r-voivers and shouted:
Come out of that water ''
Uncle Rufus's English guests marched
solemnly to shore. their faces cloudet
with confusion. They were marched &
smooth spot about fifty yards frou
the waters edge, and here they were
paired of, by two, tthere were eigh
Of them. and one of the wild western
terrors yelled:
| Get your partners for a cotillion!'
4 krt.. #. At
| Yankee Doodle. another called the flo
ures, and the other three kept up live
ly accompaniment with their pistols
whooping, shooting, and making til,
.uich ring With shouts of Faster
fasterr"
II was fastidious sight. Descend
ants of the best blood Of "hold Heng
land vhirled away iii the mad dance
clad Ia no garb except that provided b.
nature and every feilov expecting a
any moment to have that filled 80 fal
of holes that 1t wouldn't hold his soul
This was kept mp for ten or fifteen miu
ates. and then the cowboys. thinkin
they had perhaps carried tue jake fl
enough. told their prisone-s they nigh
resume their clothing. bat on penalty u
death to lot attempt returning Ia th
| ottut tot dn uouf. tucy tutn tDOk t0t1
watches, wallets. jswelry, and capture,
pops, aud rode OF. Gong back 10 th
hotel they delivered their bsoiy I
Uncle Rufus.
i In AZ hour Or 10 the plnudered nj
grims came down to the hotel. and RI
lated how they had been attacked b
about twenty road agents, and afte
} a determined fight had wounded som
! of the enemy aud driven the whnl
, gang of. In fact, our English cousin
fxed MP about as blood curdling q stor
as the ordinary Westerner could spin.
III Uncle Rufus he ard them through, an
then said quietly: IL didn't suppose 70
had much Of hght. as I noticed thi
none OF your pistols had been din
charged" And in proof of his stats
! meRt the a6able lessee Of the Nations
Park stepped into another room an
brought out Q tray containing all sh
! plumber. conspicuous on top being "a
pistols, every chamber loaded.
"Where the deuce did 70 get that. y
kuav, nov ~ choFused the Englishm.r
Oh" replied Hatch. nonchaiantl,
: II happened across the gang Of 10 /.
agents after they had robbed you.
took your property away from them
! and then killed every mothers son {
them Their scAlps are hanging in IN
J room" And Uncle Rufus sirutted "a
. with bis thumbs in his vest arm hulc,
! while the Englishuen pocketed th-i
property aud skunk of TO their roo,us.
tn.u.r