National Republican., 1883-04-28


BEWARE of tho deadly sweet potato. A
Mississippi paper relates that lady in Natchez
put sweet potato on the stove TO boil the other
day, when II exploded with terrific force, noarly
killing the lady"
THE season Of the year is once more at
hand when the suburban resident determines 10
raise his own vegetables. The Pittsburg Telegraph
says in a few short months he will find he raised
nothing but blisters,
WHILE it may be true, according to fash
ion item, that "stout men look best in tight pana-
looms" the Commercial. AdUertiser thinks II is
equally veracious that tight men can navigate
better In stout pantaloons.
A STEER escaped from an east side slaugh-
ter house yesterday and was hotly pursued by
valiant policemen, who emptiod their revolvcrs
in their vain erdeavors to shoot the animal. The
blue coats need only bulls eye and a scorer 10
be regular rifle club. Commercial Advertiser.
THE owner Of watermelon patch in Green
wlch, Mass, received tho following note unsigned
the other day Mr.. Banks: Me and another boy
was going through your orchard one night last
year, and we picked some of your watermelons
and ate them Here's 75 cents to pay for them"
IT is seldom that newspaper Is as accom-
modatiDg as the Rochester Post Express That
journal kindly says: Those of our friends wish
ing circus tickets during the coming summer will
confer favor by sending their name and address
at the earliest moment possible" This little
scheme beats the old style chrome business all to
pieces.
BUBBLE parties are all the rage in London.
The bubbles are made of oleate of soda and gly.
cerlne, which preserve the form and character.
istics of soap bubbles but arc tougher more long
lived and aesthetic than the common ones, It Is
said they will last ior days without exploding,
and that they will rebound from tho floor like
rubber balls.
THERE are many ways Of kissing, but a
Nevada paper takes the lead in giving graphic
description of the manner in which the female
art of self defense is praciced in that section, by
asserting that when Bode girl is embraced she
wants to do all the kissing herself and the noise
she makes resembles the report of slap jack
striking against tho dining room door,
THE greater part Of the village of 0akville,
twenty miles from Toronto, was burned not long
ago. The members of the village fire department
at an carly stage in the conhagratlon devoted more
energy to putting themselves outside of two bar.
rels of whisky than to fighting the fire, and the
consequence was disastrous to the village. Still,
| says the optimist of the Boston Post, few people
blame the fremen; they'd have done 1t them
selves.
A HORRIBLE discovery is said to have been
made by the Old Testament revisers The word
" rib" in the second chapter of Genesis, used in
describing the creation of Eve, ought moro cor
rectly to be rendered "tai |" This Is indeed con-
frmation strong of the theories of Darwin. Again,
the " ravens" which fed Elijah were not ravens
at all, but "gypsies," and so another cherished
illusion is dspelled and the historic value Of
Sir Frederick Leighton's picture Of Elijah and
the Ravens " is seriously impaired.
DU MAURIER is very happy in hitting of
the peculiarities Of foreigners wdll English
men In his social sketches-every one can under
stand the merit of his German panists but he
rarely attempts American figures. 1t is not, how
ever, says Henry James in the May Century, that
he has not occasionally beon inspired by the
American girl, whom he endows with due pretti-
ness as in the case OF the two transatlantic young
ladies who, in the presence of fine Alpine view,
exclaim to British admirer, my! amt it
rustlc?"
Mr.. FREDERIC VANDERBILT had most
acceptable visitor at luncheon the other day In
tho shape of his father, Mr.. William II. Wander
bilt, who brought with him in his pocket and gave
TO his son the deed of his old Fifth avenue house
Little presents of this kind, though trfes light
as mir" do much toward alleviating the friction
between young man and his governor, and, as
the New York Herald says, help to make life
worth living, Mr.. Mallock "to the contrary not.
| WltNblhHulIbs II We MI COulu nave ihtucIb WIN
an extra Finn avenue mansion TO spare it would
simplify matters considerably.
THE matrimonial chances of young lady in
life have been partially determined by an old
maid in Philadelphia. She kept the record Of
1000 of her acquaintances who were led to the
altar She finds that the chances between tho
ages of Ia and 40 are follows: Thirty-two at IL
and To- l0i at 16 and IL 2l0 at Is and 49, 230 at 2C
and 81 1856 at % and 2 90 at "a at 90 60 at % and
o. 40 ut 2S and 90 is at 80 and 81 IL ut 80 and 49,
at "a and 35, at 80 and 81, and at 3s and 80. II
will therefore be seen that from 10 to 20 is the
food time of matrimony, and that 1t is at those
ages that the most chances are taken in the great
lottery.
BARNES, the Kentucky mountain evangel.
list, is in London seeing the sights and doing the
city before he begins preaching to the people. He
says nearly all the people he has seen have blaz-
ing ale, gin, and brandy compilations, but look
more healthy than the sallow- faced Americans
He finds the Londonors the illest dressed people
he ever saw, men and women and children. No,
body's clothes fit the body on which they are
hung He seen London going on two wheels
leaving out the omnibuses and hackney coaches
all the rest are hansoms, dog carts, and donkey
carts. Barnes is a graphic letter writer. and hi
style Of correspondence is better than his preach
ing, If the latter has been correctly reported
LADY FLORENCE DIXIEs love OF adven
ture affords boundless opportunities for Londor
after dinner story tellers. Here is one that wa
not, probably told at the dinner table: "Righ
opposite The Fishery where Sir Beaumont
Dixie resides, is tho country residence of Lort
sandys, and the lawn Of the latter stretches clear
down to the waters edge. Some time ago LORD
sandys gave q dinner party, and Lady Florenc,
Dixie was one of the invited guests. Before tn,
dinner Lord sandys, with one OF his friends, wa
enjoying a breath Of fresh air on the lawn In the
gloaming when sound OF splashing drew thei
attention TO the river, In another moment
dripping figure emerged from the water Tn,
naiad turned out TO be Lady Florence, who haC
swan across from The Fishery in a bathing
gown, and sent her maid around by the bridg,
with her clothes"
SOME of the great American fortunes arr
suddenly acquired, but they are not quite 81
Objectionable in their character as the grea
landed estates in Great Britain. The city o
Cardiff, In Wales, for instance which has growi
from 1900 in 1851 TO 100000 now, is nearly al
owned by Lord Butte, the prlestly Catholi
peer His income is sl,5OO,0OO from the city
and his political and personal power /
immense, because he owns pretty much all tn
land. Rents are the highest there Of an,
place in the United Kingdom of the same size
Bute's ancestors gave the town its first docks AM
started its career but Robert IT, Porter, in his let
ters TO the New York Tribune, says that the pres
, ent marquis is a great obstacle TO progress. 81
| Hussey Vivian holds similar relation 4