The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-09-29

| NS A'''Shb hHO"ihS hs ioAJ hhu useiees
as hedgehog. He is, like ladies' gloves,
of every size, and is by nature adapted to
every stage of cussedness. He is too numer-
Gus to be examined in a crowd, SO we will
take him one at time and proceed to Lut
him under a microscope where he can le
cut oil, as il were, by detaohments. The
youth, upon whom our eagle eye is
riveted this week is just 6iteen years Of age.
lie hos accomplished the usual amount of
going to and disappearing from school. lie
has learned reading, writing, arithmetic
and the use of tobacco. A couple Of girls in
Mahoning think him the finest fellow in
the whole world, and a young lady from
Parrvvile has made him immortal by
printing his name, in full, With silver let
tiers upon ground of purple satin. Let us
for shortness, call him Josephus. 1t is a
name that admits of abbreviation, soriptual
comment and manifold comparison. Just
at the present his parents are troubled about
two things. They want him to get trade
and he wants them to get him a watch
The watch, as being the more important, is
procured in the first place and discussion
ensues about the trade. "Jo" would like IL
be President, but that Office is filed. He
would accept the proprietorship of the
Pennsylvania and Reading Railroad, but
Mr.. Gowen wont give il to him. lie would
accept the nomination for Judge of Carbon
and Monroe counties, but he is too young.
He wouldn't mind being Sheriff but be
don't want 10 live in a Jail. There is no
bishopric vacant in the neighborhood; every
third man in the town is a doctor of medi.
cine; the chief burgess receives inadequate
compensation for bis services the high
school and local paper have completed their
stafis; the hotels require no clerks, and-to
make long story short-all the avenues to
immediate success and comfort are cut of,
from Jos. However he must "root or die"
and one fine morning he walks down to the
foundry and joins the noble army Of mold
ers. After a month of diligence, he learns
how to spoil the boiler Of q stove or leg Of
sewing machine without spilling any Of the
molten iron upon his toes. lie is getting
along fairly well, and daily hard work
keeps his mind from presidential or theo-
Logical speculations. He possesses the usual
number Of accomplishments, and can play
the jewsharp. His week days roll by har.
moniously enough, but there arises a ditIi
Guilty about evenings and Sunday. And
here comes very important consideration
which has not been dealt with by any edu-
cational system. Joe. is still boy, and
somewhat above the average boy at that.
Tie has not very eleyated notion of life,
but, on the other hand, he has no greater
vices than those which follow from chew
ing pound of "fine cut" every week. He
get an "easy shave" at Rhoederer's or al
Rosebery's every Saturday, and goes To
church on Sunday evening when the girls
are coming out. 1t other simple and uuas.
suming ways he observes the moral law,
and breaks as few Of the Ten Command
ments-st a time-as may be convenient.
But there is absolutely nothing bad about
him. In the hands Of some one who could
direct him properly now, he may be mold
ed as easily as a wax candle. But let us
exrmine for an instant the "molding" pro.
cess which Joseph undergoes. He has
learned at school that any American boy
may become President OF the United States
He has heard that Andrew Jackson and
Abraham Lincoln went barefooted when
boys and worked at numbering in the woods
when young men. He has heard at least
Off hundred thousand cases of men who
began life with shilling's worth of " no.
tions," some Of whom are now rich merch-
ants, and others, peradventure, with dim
inished stock of notions, legislating in their
native states for ten dollars a day, TO be
continued through the endless ages Of etern
ity. All this fires his ambition and imagi-
nation. Joe, too, threatens that he will be.
come somebody. The foundry is made q
starting point, and lie as good as any other
A trade which develops skill and in:ellig-
euce, with q nice adaptation Of eye and
hand, provides lever for great underiak
ings. Joe begins to feel that he is becoming
a smart sort of a chap and each day as he
leaves work he 6nds himself prospecting as
to his future. He goes home; brushes him
sell up; eats his supper and stands IN the
doorway whh his hands in his pockets
This is the very moment when Joe is to be
captured for the White House or -. II bis
home were made as agreeable ss it ought to
be, there is no doubt that Joe would stay at
home. If there existed the sort of society
which young men desire, Joe would seek
that society and pass away his evenings in
some way both instructive and entertain
ing. But first let us understand that " Joe
don't want no tea parties; thank you" If
it is summer he wants TO be in the open air
and stretch his limbs after the long toiling
hours of the day, either watching or taking
part in some game or exercise which at
tracts attention and holds his interest,"
There is usually no such rational excite.
meut-snd every boy "worlh his oats wants
excitement. He'll meet people Of his own
size and weight anyhow, anywhere. The
time aud place are usually fixed in q saloon.
And in the bar room, or near the portals of
a saloon, the summer evening is spent by
our accommodating friend. Winter comes
on. The home is far less attractive even
than in summer. The saloon is brilliant
with lights and sparkling glass, and big
boned men are telling their adventures
garnished with vile oaths and nonstrous
lies. The billiard table is surrounded by
the smartess of the gang, and shouts rise for
checks, liquor and cigars. Joe begins 10
think that this noisy crowd is an animated
sort Of life, anyhow. There is nothing fat,
stale or respectable about ii. It is rough,
coarse, somewhat brutal and utterly un-
serupulous. but the blood circulates freely
here. The very meanest, flthiest thought
NAV be eypressed and the tneaney and