davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1883-05-10
Kate Adams
HIGH WATER MARK.

HUH WATER MARK.
The high water level of the food of
1882 at the port of Memphis was
reached on March 9th, when the govN
eminent gauge at the foot of Jefferson
street read 35 feet 2 inches.
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1883-05-10
RATLROAp TTMErABLRA.

LEAVE. ARRIVE.
- ------------
Sew Orleans Mall dslly $50 pm $50 am
freight train car Pigs
E(exeept 6undsyl.......... 6.55 am 2.3O pm
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17
Knew How"

II have snubbed him fifty times, "
said a young lady to her friend, as they
were riding down town in an Indiana
Avenue car land he don't seem to
tumble to it.
"Why don't you tell him plainly that
his attentions to you are obnoxious, and
that you do not love him. said her
companion
II have minated as much on several
occasions, y replied the miss. "still he
persists in calling upon me. | have
about concluded to marry him, and then
get divorced to get rid Of him.
by the way asked the other, "who
is the MANI
"Why, he is that little tailor on Dear
born street, replied the girl
THAT settles it, +" said her companion.
'You will be obliged to marry him, for
if there is any one on earth who knows
how to successfully press a suit, it is a
tailor. National Weekly.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17
A Monkey on the Rampage.

Mr.. William Kiefabe, has lately re-
turned from trip to Central America,
SAYS the Dayton Ohio Democrat. and
he brought with him, rs memento of
his visit, several tropical birds and q
particularly lively specrlen of the mon
key tribe. The latter has been confined
in cage and placed on exhibition Mt
the Third street depot restaurant, OF
which Mr.. Kiefaber is the proprietor.
The monkey has attracted much atten-
ton and many visitors. About i've
o'clock yesterday morning he succeeded
in opening the door of his cage. thus
securing the freedom of the entire eS-
adjustment. He made the most of his
liberty and proceeded TO inspect his new
possessions at once. On the counter
there stood an image Of n coal black
monkey holding platter on which We're
piled a lot of oranges. The tropical
monkey surveyed his darkey counter
part ut first with curiosity, then with
growing anger, aroused perhaps by the
stolid Indifference of the black monkey.
or may be it was the inborn prejudice
of the lighter races against the darker
cropping out in this connecting link be-
tween the bipeds aud the quadruped.
At all events his anger soon grew to
frenzy, and, with a shrill scream, he
seized the image by the throat and DASH
ed it to the floor, when it broke into
countless pieces. Elated with his sue
cess, he next seized a plaster image of
q child bearing alOft basket Of fruit,
and the child shared the fate of the
black monkey. On the cigar counter
stood a bronze kerosene lamp with a
highly ornamented globe, used for
lighting cigars. His monkeyship in
spected this, smelled it and expressed
his disgust by sending the lamp after
the plaster images. Canned goods,
fruits, candies and other wares in turn
attracted his attention, and were scat
tered promiscuously around the floor
Finally he found a basket of eggs, pick
ed one up and examined it critically.
He tried to bite it, but his mouth was
not large enough to encompass the egg,
so he threw it on the floor, where, Of
course. it was broken. The monkey
was attracted by the golden yolk. He
got down from his perch and eXamin-
ed the thing closely, thoughtfully
scratched his head, then returned TO the
basket of eggs. He took up another,
looked at il, then at the one spread ont
upon the floor, and evidently concluded
that broken egg was better than an
unbroken one, and he acted promptly
on this conclusion. One by zone the eggs
were fired at the stove, at the walls and
at various objects, and in few
minutes the interior of the restaurant
looked rs though it had been throug an
earthquake. BY this time quite crowd
had been attracted to the windows and
me spectators were enjoying the scene
immensely. when n rear door opened
and an employee made his appearance
on the scene. The mischief-maker was
captured and carried into ignominious
captivity. Mr., Kiefaber has a monkey
for sale, and we give him this advertise
ment free OF charge.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

Kissime, Fla; 1.-The quarter which the
Great Father gave to my papoose has a
hole in ii, and | write to know if it is n
legal tender for firewater in the land of
the pretty paIefaced maiden The ciCal
which he gave to me made me awful
sick / pared my corns with Chand-
ler's knife, and he said could keep It. e
In suit for separation the counsel for
the wife pleaded, among other motives,
the incompatibility of temper, and be-
gan TO trace a portrait of her husband:
BRUTAL. violent, anger" The law
yer for the husband, in his turn, painted
the wife: wicked violent. peevish. -
Excuse me, said the Judge, inter-
rupting the advocate gentlemen. where
do You lind the incompatibility of tenn
PERI"
Twenty-Five years ago a young Phila-
delphian wife nearly cried her ewes out
because she could not afford to scrape
from her walls the unsightly old-fash-
Toned paper, full of peacocks, and peli-
cans, and things and put nice neat,
new style in its place. Now her mar
ried daughter is weeping because she
can tatlord to put the peacocks and peli-
cans back. Life is full Of trouble.
Near Eureka. New, lives a man and
wife in perfect bliss, who got to quarrel
ing couple of years ago, after living
pleasantly together for thirty years, and
agreed to divide everything, even 20 a
board partition in the bed This lasted
some time, until one morning, when tse
old man was lying about half asleep.
the old lady peered over the board and
calculated: "Bless his dear old heart "
The husband starting up, said: Do you
mean that?" The answer was in the
affirmative, and the old fellow roared:
Take away the board.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17
Misdirrctsd Inventive Genins.

Professor Lcndstrom, German scien
list, climbed Spitzbergen mountain
the other day, and by the aid of some
long wire rods, battery. some insuls-
tors. acids, and bad smelling drugs,
manufactured an Aurora Borealis. Il
is true that it was not n very large one.
1t was described rs being "about the
size OF the gable end of a two-story
house.
Tho scientific world is excited over
this achievement of Professor Lend
strom, The Professor acknowledges
that his Aurora is not perfect yet. 1t is
a little ragged at the edges, and inclined
to warp and shrink in dry weather;
but he claims that ~ will soon be ablo
10 produce u Borcalis exactly like the
genuine article furnished by nature, and
equally as good
What use Professor lindsuom can
make of an Aurora Borcalis. we can
not see. You can't eat one of them.
1t is not a substitute for tobacco. Meth
err is it q slimulant, nor cure for chills.
IL is not "a labo, saving machine. The
Professor cannot pull his boots off at
night with his Aurora BorcaHs, nor use
1t rs a corkScrew, nor fry q rasher OF
bacon on it.
There might be some point in manu-
featuring Aurora Borcalises if they
would run machinery. poison rats, or
grub up roots ON the farm; but they do
not seem to accomplish anything, and
even if they did they could not be sent
20 purchasers by mail. and IL forwarded
by express the freight would eat up all
the profit and ruin the Borealis indus
try We deprocate these Investigations
into the realms of natural science.
First thing we know scientific men will
bo working up schemes To manufacture
all kinds OF natural phenomena, aud the
day may not be far distant when the
poorest In the land may be able to own
cyclone, or transit of Venus made
To order, and earthquakes, eclipscs, and
waterspouts of assorted sizes will be
manufactured, warranted 60 be equal to
the genuine and 10 keep good in any
climate. and no one will be too poor 70
set up private collection of rainbows
In his own back yard But we do not
think that this will add TO the wealth of
the country If these scientific men
would go to work inyeutug ways and
means To make buttermilk without the
aid of a cow, or should discover means
to make imitation gumhoils, or other
valuable articles of commerce, they
would confer benefit on the public.
and generations yet unborn might call
them blessed; but an Aurora Borealis
factory is not what the people of this
country yearn for Tcra sVhagS
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17
House Dscoration.

If YOU have not bookcase, make
one or two look better, if YOU like TO
fill up the reccsses each side of q chim-
ncy. Any nook, or q corner will do,
though n corner is rather harder TO fit
up. Have n carpenter make you some
very smooth shelves and fit them into
place from the floor only breast high.
DO not paint or stain them, but rub
them roughly with oil, except the top
one, which should be covered with .
bright cloth Finish the edge of the
shelves with a strip Of scarlet leather
cloth pinked on each edge and fastened
on with brass-hcaded nails Make
pretty curtain to hang across the front.
1t may be Of dark felt cloth. trimmed
across with bright bands Of cloth feath-
er-stitched ON. or OF crash worked in
outline embroidery. or OF any material
or color which will harmonic with your
carpets or curtains. Hang it with brass
rings (Which YOU can buy Of any uphols-
tcter) on pole which should be- fast
cned in front OF the top shelf (wc forgot
TO say in its proper place, that the top
shelf should be nearly inches wider
than the others) The pole may be or
dered with the rings, or you can take
section o. gas pipe Cor a broom stick
and gildit, with prepared gliding, bought
ct paint shop.
10 support the pole, have your car
ponter saw you out a couple Of small
brackets with a hole in the center just
large enough to admit the pole
Fasten your curtain TO the rings put
the rings on the pole, and the pole
through the brackets, then screw the
latter into place Gid the brackets and
screw heads like the pole. Put plaster
busts or other ornaments on the top
shelf, and you viii say You have pref
" and useful piece of furniture at
slight expense We saw lovely cur
tain for this purpose made Of olive col
Ored felt cloth Across the bottom was
deep facing Of maroon cloth, above
this were five rows Of ordinary worsted
braid in bright color, and fastened at
each edge with high-colorcd silks in
fancy stitches About 3 inches from the
top of the curtain was another cluster of
the braiGg. runners ReUicU
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17
WV Ha pidnIt Aa.ooIaLa witl Hln.

why lie Uldn't Associate with hlnfr
Did / ever tell YOU how Dolph Jakes
beat me out of s. 65p'
No. Murphy; how was itF' said the
listener
"Why was sitttn' In the Aston lunch
one night, and in came Dolph. He
walked up TO the bar and took drink
There was big dish of hard boiled eggs
at one end OF the bar, aud he began go
ing for them He picked up an egg.
cracked it ON the bar, picked the shell
oil, and ate IT, But ho didn't stop; he
ate another aud another, until Inc had
swallowed Ave. | was watching him,
and it made me real mad TO sec him So.
greedy. So said: Dolph, YOU had
better eat 'cm all, hadn't your"
ESQ viii, Charles, il you'll pay for
'em, said he.
""Go right along, l said; IN pay If
you finish the dish
ale mover stopped until hc had eaten
twenty-five more. lie then took drink.
ate an oyster stew. plate of crackers,
and finished the dish of eggs There
were twenty more. Fifty-threc
eggs was what he ate, and they had the
cheek TO charge me five cents apiece for
EN- just $3.50 ! was out | never
spoke to Dolph again | wouldn't as
sociate with him after that. The Gus
HOaOBlcr.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

A traveller in Montana, while suffer
ing from the cold at % degrees below
zero, offered to bet 500 that no human
being living could ascend the Big Hole
Mountain, POO feet high. without any
other clothing than pair Of boots, and
rcturn alive A native accepted the bet.
put mp the money, and started, being
absolutely naked above the tops OF his
rubber boots lie carried whisky bot
tie il the left hand and twig Of long
leaYed pine inthe other. a rousing APP
plause Of the crowd Of spectators greet
ed the hero when he reached the top.
lie did not stop long, but returned on
the Jump. His face was red-hot from
the whisky his back By scourging him
self with the pine twig, and the uncoy-
cred parts Of his legs We're blue with
chiliness.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17


cam Judge Perfection Smith in de
hall dis cayenin?" asked the President
as be laid aside his gavcl and looked
around him.
Eyes, sab, answered a voice full Of
fishbones and shingle-nails shaken up
together.
''Please ambulate dis way"
The Judge ambulated. He came up
confident and smiling, expecting to re-
ceive gold medal for inyenting a
mosquito-bar, which also catches rats.
Judge Smith" said the President in
a solemn voice, "dar' am few little
things | dcsiah to spoke to YOU about
You war at dc pos offs dc oddcr day 10
rent a box at $3.50 per quarter All do
mail dat you receive in six months
wouldn't light a kerosene lamp. Den
why dis attempt TO frow on style an
heap on agonyP"
IL didn't rent one, sab, replied
the culprit in a weak voice.
"A few days ago, continued the
President. 81 Overheard you trottiu out
a Presidential candidate for 1884. You
had your biggest voice, an you was
finpin your arms about, an one would
have thought you knowCd all about it,
Judge Smith you will have no mo- to
do wild dc maxim oh de mex President
of de United States dan one grain Of
sand will have in maxim up dc great
Sahary Desert. -
"No. sah-dat's so. sab.
.Let dis be a warnin 10 you, sah.
From dis time on YOU have no candidate,
doan' want one, an take no interes' in
polyticks beyond what can be 'spected
of cherry citizen. Ii any man axes You
to tell him who am 10 be de mex Presi-
dent doan' YOU do it. Keep dat inform
alton locked tight in your busum An
n day or two ago YOU denounced your
self as an advocate Of 9 tariff Judge
Smith, do YOU know what % tariff tsp"
''N-not zactly, sab, but | was gwino
to read up on it.
Exactly; an perhaps you'd better
read UP on how 70 keep your mouf shct
on what YOU doan' know an what doan'
afIeck youl You am n purity lookin'
advocate, YOU am While your wife
needs shoes an dc cbill'on want clothes
You walk aroun' de market wild yer old
white oyercoat on to tell de world dat
YOU doan' believe in dis or dat. or dat
you am welded 10 dis theory or opposed
To dat one,
"Ize sorry, sab. III drap de hull
bizness right Off =
"Sce dat YOU do Theories am all right
onlcss q man am two months behind on
his rent. Doctrines am all right when
a family hain't shiberiu wild cold In-
diyidual opinions count fur muffin when
de individual can't raise cash uuf to
ret patch on his boot Go an sot
down. Judge Smith, an doan' lose
mint in startin' on dc road 30 reform.
.C.asa Belle tolls thn Cincinnati In
quir. tllat an aetres ~ baly lheater
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

Cornell University has received a spe-
cimen Of a rare and curious plant, Schi-
.aus mollc, from South America 1t is
called the ''insect plant, rs the leaves,
when placed in water, will dart about
on the surface like 'skipjacks They
resemble sumac leaves and are supposed
to derive their curious movements from
little saes OF oil which explode on touch
Ing the water. The oil is expelled with
great force, driving the leaf through the
water Altogether the plant s a curious
one and well worthy Of cultivation in
greenhouses.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

The Sioux Indians of Dakota occupy
about II 900, 900 acres Of land west Of tie
Missouri river, between Fort Randall
and Bismarck 1t is proposed to put
them upon their separate reservations,
leaving about 100000 acres which can
be thrown open for settlement. and at
the same time bring the Black Hills
country nearer civilization by wiping
out the vast tract Of "Indian country
which has hitherto lain between it and
the other Dakota settlements.
Last year there was an increase ..
nearly S25, 000.000in the deposits, Of saw
ing banks the State OF New York.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17
Covering Up the Deficiency.

Mrs. wallis Yates IS the wife Of an
Austin merchant in falling circum-
stances. She is extremely thin, but new
ertheless attends balls and parties in a
very low-necked dress. She attracted
the attention Of two young men at ball
not long since. One Of them said to the
other:
"Do YOU see how Mrs. Wells Yates IS
dressed2'i
ayes. her husband ought to tell her
TO do ike he does in his business. Cow
er up the deficiencies SO the public can
not see them?n Teas syting8.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

A chemist Of Vienna has invented q
glass which contains no slick, potash
soda, lime or boraY In appearance it
Is common crystal, but more brilliant,
it is transparent, white and clear, and
can be cut and polished. Il is insoluble
in water, and is not attacked by lluoric
acid, but it can bc corroded by hydro
chloric and nitric acid. When in a state
Of fusion it adhcres 70 iron, bronze and
zinc.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

It appears that lines Of latitude and
longitude are finally to play no part in
the political affairs Of this continent.
Already Boston capital is seeking in
yestmeut in Mexico
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

According to Mr. George W. Cable,
there are seven distinct dialects spoken
IA Louisiana.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

Ice cannot cool dc revenge OILS hate.
an no fire can warm de chill oh death
De troubles we hab in dc bcginnin' ob
life in ole age is looked back 70 rs life's
pleasures
Poverty will give whar riches viii re.
fuse. Dis is one reason why dc po' is
20 an why de rich Is rich
DE wise men spckerlates on 10 mys-
terics oh death when da amt chen foun'
out dc mysteries oh life
De downfall oh hypocrite is chen
enjoyed by all hypocrites demsclyes
ef da doan b'long ter dc same church.
De cullud gen lcman is cuis. He calls
himself u niger but when do white
folks says dat he is u niger, he gets
mighty mad.
De mos harmful influences Oh dis
life is concealed under de brightest xiv
er. De black snake ain nigh SO putty
rs de copper-head, but he amt half so
pizen.
Nine men outen ten, what has a repu-
taton fur bcin smart. IS liberated an
nine men outen ten. what amt got dc
reputation, IS moderated. De liberated
man what is honest, may tell de folks
dat too high u value is placed on his
sense. an da take it rs a reproach an
expression ob dc fack dat he feels dat
da doan think enough oh him, an de
moderated man may say dat he amt
valued high enough, an da has a wus
opinion Oh him den da did bofo'.-
ArInRsuD Ifagelcr
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

The Syracuse journal says that over
two tons Of hairpins are made daily IN
this country Who is the slanderer that
saws women do nothing2 i is no little
lob to get away daily with two tons Of
hairpins. Rochester Democrat.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

De downfall OBJ hypocrite is chen
enjoyed by all hypocrites demselyes
ef da doan b'long ter de same church.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

De cullud gentleman is cuis He calls
himself niger but when do white
folks say, dat he is u niger, he gets
mighty mad
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

De wise men spckerates on da mys-
ferries Oh death when da amt chen foun'
out dc mysteries oh life.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

Poverty will give whar riches will re
fuse Dis Is one reason why dc po' is
20 an ,vhv de rich Is rich.
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

lee cannot cool dc revenge OILS hate.
n no fire can warm dc chill oh death
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

"C.asa Belle tolls TIE Cincinnati In
gufr that an actress DaIy lheater
named kda l{ohan bias made Bit by
mimicsing the current manners u the
New York giri 81 apex society
Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-05-17

De troubles we hab in dc beginnin ob
life in ole age is looked back 70 rs life's
nlnnsnrns
The Rugbeian and district reporter. (Rugby, Tenn.) 1882-1883, 1883-02-03
LATE NEWS ITEMS.

In the United States Senate on the
numerous appointments were confirmed.
The Tariff bill was further discussed and
some unimportant changes in The metal
schedule were made. In the House, Mr..
Belmont from the Committee on Foreign
Affairs, presented minor ty report OPP
posing the abragation of The Hawaiian
treaty. The Tariff bill occupied the re-
mainder of the session.
The Court of Claims, in session at
Washington, ID. c., the other day, rendered
judgment for 49,. $50 in favor OF the exec'ors
OF James Green for the use of the Man lion
House, at Alexandria, Va, during the w,r.
A PLACARD was posted in st. Peters,
burg, Russia the otner day warming e,ey-
body to avoid places frequented by royalty
for fear Of accidents.
TIE trouble in British COLUMBIA,
which the United States revenue cutter
Oliver Walcott recently weut 10 settle, was
adjusted amicably
The State Department at Washing
ton the other day made Il formal request "
the Canadian an horiiies for the return oil
Hall, the New Jersey fugitive.
THE Kentucky courts lately overruled
motion to qua,h a murd indictment on
the ground that the jury was chosen in ac-
cordance with The State law from whites "
eIu>ively. The Uni ed States Supreme Court
has reversed the ruling.
THE. German bark Prinz Adelbert
went ashore on the Enel fish cua>l, the other
day, and six OF her crew were drowned.
CHIEF ENGINEER &. W. MELVILLE,
U. S. N, has been ordered to duty in
charse OF stores al the Navy Yard at League
Island, Pa.
HAzLEToN Bros piano factory in
| New York City was burned The other M NJ
n {, causing loss OF $ll0. 00O, and that If
| Betr Bros. q Co., was scorched about $780,
| 100 worth. t'
GEORGE W. HARM, proprietor of the
| Grand Central Ho ell, the largest at Readi. G.
| Pa, has failed.
The postal authorities have lately is
urd an order requiring railway postal
erks TO wear the I, gulalion badges while
"a duty.
The death of Colonel Irish, Chief of
! he Bureau Oh Engraving aud Printing, was
nnounced at Washington, ID. c., the other
/ ~.
SEVERAL carloads of dressed beef
nd dressed sheep we're shipped from Mics
,it,, Mont, the other day in refrgerating
ais. A siock company had been organized
here which would 10 the spring 20 into the
,usiness on large scale. Il vas claimed
| gna, this way Of shipping meat vas more
pIufi able 10 stock men than sa.pping on the
hoof.
The Rugbeian and district reporter. (Rugby, Tenn.) 1882-1883, 1883-02-03

Compartments bill having been filed to
collect an all ged 'nde ,te,lnrss, and an attach.
ment having lssu d ami been rtturnea levied
upon certain Interests of de eudants in Scott
County; and it APPEAR Z from allegations in
SAID Ol that the aid 30 ,rd OF Aid to Land
ownership, limited, Henry Kimber, George
smith. } W. rielder. W. 5. Yard and the heirs
and devlsees of Gerge brown. dec, whose
names and residences are unknown, but who
lam an interest liz the lands describei,In the
coinplalnants bill, are all non residents of the
state OF tennessee so that the ordinary process
OF law cainot BE- served upon them.
1t is therefore orderedthat publication be
made Tor four successive eks in the Ria.
beam, newspaper published in Morgan
County. Notifying said non residents to appear
at the next term of said Court. to be held az
the Court House in Huntsville. on the fourth
Monday III March next. and make defense ia
said bill, or the same will be taken for con.
tessed. and the cause sci ol hearing ca parts
as to them.
This the 9th lay of January. 1889.
j. }. DUNCAN. c. & NJ.