davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-07-11

A young lawyer in Detroit, who had
made an engagement to deliver a hum
orous lecture in an interior village, met
with a domestic misfortune and was
obliged to telegraph the fact that he
could not keep his engagement.
Explain to the assemblage," he add.
ed, ''the nature of my misfortune, and
express my sincere regrets"
Next morning he received telegram
from the committee reading:
I'VE showed him the telegram, re-
funded his money, and he went off to
play checkers perfectly satisfied with
Dour npologies!"
The lawyer is trying hard to see what
nhlmIf has to do with "assewblaae."
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-07-11

We will send to any subscriber who has already
paid in advance, The HoUsEKEEpER one year
and the Waterbury Watch for $325 and postage.
This is IS cents less than the retail price of the
watch alone.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-07-11
The WATERBURY WATCH

is the size and style represented in the cut, and
is the best cheap watch made. It is q etem wfnder
in nickle silver case, which will not tarnish and
regularly at $4.OO and is we'll worth the money.
IF sentby mail enclose "a cents for postage and
we guarantee safe delivery)
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-07-11

A preacher, who had withdrawn from
one church and taken position in an
other where he received twice as much
salary, said he had always been s.yearn.
ing for broader field to preach the
gospel in. = ~
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-07-11
LYDIA e. PlNKHAM's
VEGETABLE COMPOUND.
Isnp Positive Cure


tor all those Painful Cemplalnts and Weaknesses
sOcnmmOn to our best female population.
1t will entirely the worst form Of Female Com
pnints all ovarian troubles, Inflammation and Ulcera
tion Falling and Dlsplacements. and the consequent
Spinal Weakness and II particularly adapted to the
Change OF Iife
1t will dissolve and expe tun,ors IRON, The uterus IN
early stage OF development Tho tendency to can
thereis checked very speedily hy Its
1t faintness Ratnlency. destroysall craving
Tor stimuants and relieves weakness of tho stomach.
It Bloating, Headaches, Nervous Prostration.
General Debility. sleepiessness. Depression and Indi
GestioE.
That feeling Of bearing down, causing PAIN weight
and backaclc Is always permanently cured by its
1t will at Gil times and under al circumstances act in
harmony with tlless that govern the female system.
For the cure OF Kidney Complaints OF either this
Compound is unsurpassed.
LYDIA T.. TISE.IAM's VEGETABLE COM.
POUNDS prepared at 233 AMI o3s Western Avenue.
Lynn, Mass Price 81. Six tiles for g. Sent by mail
IN the form or pills. also IN tx" frm OF ioZenges
receipt OF price. q "r rr either Mrs Pinkhaln
freely all letter. u,s.y. Send for pamph.
lot. Address above Na!:oi his luper
No family should t. a. hos; L'+niA iE. PISKHAN1
LIVE. r::.:.. =" .. - - y, ''''-''~~ =,
sn': r.:.:i:y a.
SSi. ~ II 49,
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12

WHAT MEN NEED WIVES FoR.-It
is not to sweep the house, and make
the beds, and darn the socks. and
cook the meals, chiefly that man
wants wife. If this is all he wants.
hired servants can do it cheaper than
wife. II this is all, when q young
man calls to see lady send him into
the pantry to taste of the bread and
cakes she has made; send him to in
spect the needle-work and bed-ma-
ing; CT put broom into her hand and
send him to witness its use. Such
things are important, and the wise
young man viii quietly look after
them. But what the true man most
wants of wife is her companionship.
sympathy and love. The way of life
has many dreary places in it, and man
needs companion to 60 with him. A
man Is sometimes oyertaken by mig
fortunes; he meets with failure and
defeat; trials and temptations beset
him; and he needs one to stand by
him and sympathize. He has some
stern battles to fight with poverty,
with enemies and with sin, and he
needs q woman that, while he puts
his arm around her and feels that he
has something TO fight for, will help
him fight; who viii put her lips to his
ear and whisper words of counsel, and
her hand TO his heart and impart
new inspirations. All through life
through storm and through sunshine,
conflict and victory; through adverse
and favorable winds-man needs
woman's love. The heart yearns for
il. A sisters and q mothers love
viii hardly supply the need. Yet
many seek for nothing further than
success in housework. Justly enough,
half Of these get nothing more. The
other hall. surprised above measure,
obtain more than they sought. Their
Wives surprise them BY bringing no.
bier idea Of marriage, and disclosing
q aeasury Of courage, sympathy and
love.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12

MADE THEN EeEE.-"Arrested for
carrying a pistol, Aas he p asked a
magistrate Of an officer. referring to a
gentleman who had just been arraign-
ed. Lets see the pistOlS The wea-
pom was produced and handed to the
judge, who examined it and asked
Where did you get it?
Bought it at hardware steEe."
what did it cost?"
Fifteen dollars"
Fine implement. Hbw'll you
swopg' and the Judge dfew out a
pistol and handed it TO thk prisoner.
Take $40 to boot"
"All right. I'll fine yoggSl0. That
makes US even
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12

p@- A curious prescription: A
young physician who had long wor-
shipped at a distance was one day
suddenly called to attend her. He
found her suffering from no particu-
larly dangerous malsdy, but she want
ed him TO prescribe for her neverthe-
less; so he took her hand and said i'm
pressively: well, / should-pre-
scribe-I should prescribe that-you
get married" 'Oh, goodness r.
said the interesting invalid, "who
would marry me, | wonder?" 81
would" snapped the doctor, with all
the : Yoracity of a six foot picksrel.
"You X exclaimed the maiden. "Yes. .
'Well, dsctor, If that is the fearful al
tentative. YOU can go away and let me
die in peacef- WrsghtsviIIe Ca Re
corder.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12

E When the lecturer as worked
the ladies Of his audience $50 near to
the weeping point that they have got
ten out their handkerchi;Efs. and the a
suddenly changes his tor e and speaks
Of the merits Of DR.. Bills Cough
Syrup he Is bound to rouse a feeling
oE Indignation.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12

husband immediately afterward.
And the blessing was bestowed.
THE CYNIc.-0ne Of the most disa-
greeable human beings is the cynic
who does not believe in good or dis
isterested motives. He distrusts ev-
cry one. He is skeptical as to the
sincerity of all men, and he believes
that self-interest prompts all their ac-
tions.
Whenever you see one Of these men
you see one who is 30 filled with sell
fishness that there is not room enough
inside of him for it and for all the
egotism he tries to carry, and you will
see it oozing out of him at every pore.
These two attributes crowd his soul
into small compass, press on his
heart until there is not room for it to
develop a generous impulse, and take
possession of his mind until liberal or
noble thoughts cease to exist there.
He is liberal enough in one way
liberal in unbeliefs-but a narrow
minded bigot in his beliefs. When
he hears of some unsel6sh act, he be-
gins hunting for a selfish motive, aud
should he fail to find it, he says:
well, / cannot understand what it
is for, but he must expect benefit by
it somehow"
Certainly, he cannot understand a
dis;nterested act Of kindness, because
al his own motives are prompted by
self-interest. He knows Of no higher
motives.
The cynic is simply what he be-
lieves all other men-who are not
fools-to be. His heart is not large
enough to conceive a chiyalrous act;
his brain is not of sufficient dimen-
sions to beget or be delivered of no.
bic or generous thought, and his lit
tie soul so shriveled that if it were
possible that it could ever get to Hea-
ven, and if Peter should smile a wei
come as he let it in, it would imme-,
diately suspect the sanity gateman Of
having some interested motive in be-
ing so friendly.
Whenever you meet a man of this
kind, who suspects that everybody in
the world is trying to take advantage
of him, you may be sure that the man
would beat everybody in the world if
he could. Whenever you see a man
attribute mean or sordid motives to
others, you have found man who
himself is mean at heart, and you
have discovered man who may have
many acquaintance, but very few
friends.
Snakes, even the most venomous,
are supposed TO have been created for
some useful purpose, and so the cynic
has doubtless place in the economy
of nature that it is necessary he
should fill, but he is a very disagree
able necessity.-Teras Siftings.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12

49, Prohibition item Wake me
up, darling, tonight and give me
a toddy, said an Austin inebriate to
his wife. as they were bout to retire
for the night.
But how viii I knSw when you
want one 2
You can't make miAtake. l am
always thirsty when | a b woke up
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12
70 their aveling Public.

Having leased the property known as
MOore's Hotel, Leonardiown, Ma, for Two
years, commencing the lst OF January, 1852,
] respectfully inform the public that It's man
agement will nex be under ray exclusive di-
reciion and that no pains or expense will be
spared TO maintain the high reputation as a
public resort il has obtained IN The past and
increase il In the future. Thankful for the
liberal patronage which has heretofore been
extended 70 the House, respectfully solicit "a
continuance and increase OF the iavOrs OF the
travelling public. All parties indebted TO
Mrs. NJ. ]. Moore on hGtel account are re-
minded that the accounts due from them TO
her have been placed in my hands for settle
ment and tina. no further Indulgence can be
allowed them.
HERBERT r. MOORE.
LeonaIdlown, Nd.
Jan ~. lss2--tf.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12
Liberal Terms to Reliable Agents.
INSURANCE DEPARTMENT,

INSURANCE DEPARTMENT,
ANNAPOLIS,
JULY, lst, 1882.
JESSIE X. IlISEs, Insurance Commissioner
! oi the State ot Maryland, do hereby cerii-
", that the SUN MUTUAL AID SOCIETY,
lo.ated In the City Of Baltimore and State OF
Maryland. is duly organized under the laws
OF this State and is authorized to issue Policies
and transact business as Cooperative Mu-
Iual Aid Society.
~ In witness thereof, have here
SEAL luhio subscribed my name and af.
NI0S/hxed my official seal, at the CITY OF
annapolis, this lst day of July, A. D.. 1882.
JESSIE HINES,
Insurance Commissioner Of the State of Nd.
Feb. l5--3m.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1883-04-12
what ] ausI c0naiasr ralher ) Iad


what ! must consider rather : bad
Job.
l pronaised you my blessing Wynn,
and you shall hare It. upon two con-
ditions. The first il that you-and
! suppose your wife-shalI 90 10
China. as proposed.
We are quite willing SIR the
bookkeeper replied eagerly.
And the second condition? /?
That you never. either Of You, dis
close to any human being who was
the promoter and instigator Of your
elopement.'
Il promise papa' said Dora.
And 50 do /, Sir said the young
husband Immediately afterward.
And the blessing was bestowed.
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25
Postal Rates Ninety Years Ago.

Now that the twO-cent postage law
has gone into effect, the following pro-
visions of the frst law of Congress on
the subject will be read with interest:
February 20, 1892, was the date of the
first act fixing rates of postage on do
mestic letters, and established the fol-
lowing rates, to take effect July l, 1892
Act February 20, 1892, section 9, by
land: For every letter not exceeding 80
miles, 6 cents.
For every single letter over so miles
and not exceeding 60 miles, cents.
For every single letter over 60 miles
and not exceeding 100 miles, 10 ceDts.
For every single letter over 100 miles
and not exceeding $50 miles, 1215 cents.
For every single letter over $50 miles
and not exceeding 200 miles, 15 cents.
For ever single letter over. 200 miles
and not exceeding 250 miles. II cents.
For every single letter over 250 miles
and not exceeding $50 miles, 20 cents.
For every single letter over $50 miles
and not exceeding 45O miles, p cents.
For every single letter over 45O miles,
25 cents.
For every double letter, double the
said rates.
For every triple letter, triple the said
rates.
For every packet weighing one ounce
avoirdupois, to pay at the rate of four
single letters for each ounce, and in that
proportion for any greater weight
Elmira Advertiser.
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25
Uniform Railway Time.

The standard time adopted by the Rail-
way Time Convention at Chicago, goes
into effect Nov. IS, or whenever the
next time schedule made by the differ
ent roads interested shall 60 into effect.
According to the new system, there are
to be only four standards of time for the
whole country, and these just one hour
apart-namely, the 18th meridian, OF
eastern time. the Goth meridian, or CEN
tral time; the 105th meridian, or noun
tain time, and the 120th meridian, or
Pacific time. These are substantially
Philadelphia, st. Louis, and Denver
times, the 12Oth meridian being as near
Carson City as any other prominent
point. Now York time is minutes
faster than the Eastern or 10Th meridian
time,and Philadelphia only one minute
slower. Chicago time is 0 minutes fast.
er than the central, or Goth meridian
time, and st. Louis only one minute
slower. Denver is exactly on the 105th
meridian, and San Francisco lust ten
minutes slower than 12Oth meridian
time. Under the new arrangement, a
man can travel all over the country
without having to change his watch; he
has only to remember that noon in the
East means II o'clock west of Colum.
bus, 10 o'clock in the Denver division,
and o'clock on the Pacific slope.
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25
Washington and His Army,

Washington knew the temper of his
soldiers, and it is not unlikely that his
Communications of them went far toward
suppressing the spirit of unea iness and
insubordination that a sense of labor
ended gave rise to. He kept the men
busy and entertained them with displays
and refreshments. Often cautiohing
them against intoXication. he allowed
them to have extra rations of rum on
many slight occasions. He caused the
birth of DauphiR to be celebrated With
bontires and noise. When the French
wing Of the army was returning to New
England after Yorktown, in order to
disband, he caused the whole army to
move down the Hudson to Verplank's,
in order to have holiday with the
French soldiers. The plan of that
movement was on splendid scale, the
effect of the tlotilla as it moved down the
river being specular in the highest de-
gree. When Clergyman Evans suggest
ed the building of a temple not far from
headquarters for public worship, the
general readily fell in with the scheme.
The soldiers were set To do the work,
and it seems to have been done as play
spell rather than as labor. Prizes of
extra rations of rum were offered by
General Gates for quick and accurate
work. Finally, having nipped in the
bud the monarchical scheme and the con-
spiracy against Congress, two incidents
which render Washington's life in the
Hasbrouck house specially memorable,
be was quick to send the soldiers home
on furloughs aS soon as Congress gave
authority for so doing. AS regiment
after regiment departed he knew they
would never be called back. The war
was done. In this way the army was
disbanded, garrison for West Point
and the nucleus of our present regular
army remaining. These, in November,
1888, followed their old comrades into
New York City, where, on the 18th, they
saw Sir Guy Carleton sail away from
the battery.
Washington left Newburgh on July
Is, 1888, and made Il journey of $50
miles into the northern and western
parts of this state. He returned on
August 5, and on the nth issued his
last order from the headquarters. On
the 18th he set out for New Jersey to at
tend spon Congress. AT Rocky Point,
New Jersey, he issued his farewell ord
ers, and in November he repaired to
West Point, whence he went down to
New York TO see Carleton off, which he
did on November 25th. When the ami
versary of that departure shall be cele-
brated, the Revolutionary centennial
period will be closed New Y York Even
ing Post.
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25

WITHOUT wishing to assume the pre-
rogattve of deciding the business course
OF any man, we will be INDUCED in ex-
pressing an opinion of what we cannot
but regard as an unfortunate tendency
in these times. We refer to the dispo-
sition shown by many well-to-do farmers
to sell out their business end "move to
town" The work of the farm is not
abandoned until at least a competence
and often wealth is gained, when the
successful man conceives that, in order
to spend the remainder of his days in
quiet satisfaction, and give his family
the advantages they crave, he must
abandon the acres on which he has made
his success. There are no doubt pecu-
liar cases in which such "A course is ad
visable, but it is safe to say that in a
majority of cases it is unwise. The
| we'll fixed, Independent farmer will be
| fortunate indeed if he can find any spot
| in the world which will yield him the
comfort in his declining years to be
| found amid the scenes in which he toiled
and triumphed; and as for the "advant-
ages" sought for his family, his very
| financial independence gives him the
ability to reach the best schools, supply
| his library with the best standard liter
ature, cover his tables with the best
periodicals, and surround his home with
the comforts and luxuries of life. Why
not fit up his ideal home, which he has
pictured to himself, where it can be most
nationally, fully and permanently en-
joyed? If he locates in town after
having retired from business of all kinds
ime will hang heavy on his hands, &
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25

kind of leisure which none but those
who have not tried it crave. If he goes
into business in his new location be is
taking risk of losing, in investments
with which he is not familiar, what he
has already made. The change is from
what he already knows is good thing
into something untried and strange.
This kind of change, constantly going
on, carries good deal of wealth out of
agriculture and throws it into other
channels of business. 1t does much to
discourage young men from staying on
the farm. for, they argue, if it is desir-
able to go to town late in life, why not
60 earlier, and avoid all hard work ?
The deniZens of our cities envy the
farming population its comfort. its free
dom, its independence, much more than
they, in turn, are envied their metropol-
itan surroundings. More longing eyes
are turned from brick walls to green
fields than in the contrary direction.
DO not forget, in whatever changes you
may contemplate, that rural life has in
all ages been held as the natural. most
enjoyable and most rational condition
of man. Stockman.
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25
The Influence of Dress.

If you would have your child develop
into beautiful and symmetrical charaC-
ter, see to it, among other things, that
he is we'll clothed, that he need
never be ashamed of his own appearance.
1t is grave. mistake. however, to trick
children out in costly silks ana laces and
Jewels. That is not what they need or
what harmoniZes with them. Children
are human flowers. What need has
rose of diamond to adorn it, or the
lily of golden setting? Children need
none of these costly things, which are
appropriate only for maturity of person
and mind; nor will they want them an
less their tastes have been vitiated by
artificial training. Children's clothing
ought to be very simply made, gay aud
attractive in color, and as soft and fine
as is compatible with outdoor sports
walking, climbing. rowing. etc. But it
should always be good, well fitting, clean
and pleasing to eve. Every atteRtion to
this matter would save many a neglect
ed child from going to bed, and make her
home fortunate neighbOr still more
bright and lovely.-Tribune.
Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1883-10-25
Practical Temperance.

The Indianapolis Journal. commenting
on the increased Republican vote in the
cities and its decrease in the rural dis
tricts says it simply shows that the great
body of conservative, practical business
men have emphatically indOrsed a plain
sensible, practical method of dealing with
very vexatious question; while the vote
that was expected from localities where a
high moral sentiment, commendable as it
is, is not confronted or modified by the
presence of an existing state of facts that
city men must meet, did not materialize.'
The remark gives the whole secret in a
very happy style and in brief compass.
The Scott law was but just inaugurated
and its effects had been entirely satisfac-
tory. Thirty per cent. of the saloons OF
the state were closed by its operation, and
nearly two millions of dollars of revenue
had been derived from it to meet the adj
ditiOnal expense which it entailed on the
public That people were not able to see
any practical advantagein these facts, and
substantial progress in the right dlrec-
ton from thirty years of free whisky,
argues poorly for their perception, as we
think. When the Scott law is out of the
way, and the liquor traffic thus receives a
new lease of life and enters anew upon its
career of freedom from legal restraint,
gathering strength for new cOnqueSts,
then the practicable advocates of ''prOhi-
bition or nothing" may realize the result
of their work, but it will be too late to do
any good
The theory that taxation of the traffic
renders the state cOparcener in the busi-
ness was a powerful lever to secure votes
for the second amendment and against
the first. but it is fallaciOus in the conduct
of government. Nor does the existence
of a tax law operate in the least to retard
the agitation of prohibitOry measures.
On the contrary, it is step in the same
direction. The enactment of the Scott
law made the submission of the second
amendment possible, just as its repeal
will retard prohibition by encouraging
and strengthening the liquor influence,
and making it more arrogant and reckless
in the future.
We are not arguing against prohibition,
nor have we any disposition to do so. IL
it were to prevail and could be enforced it
would no doubt accomplish all that its
advocates claim for it. But until the time
arrives when it is enforced it would seem
to be the duty of all good citizens to COM
bine together and secure the very best at
tainable practical legislation for the con-
servation of good morals and just govern
ment. We have never been able to see
why the most enthusiastic prohibitionist
could not act up to such policy with y
clear conscience. The Republicans of
Ohio have merely sought to accomplish
practical and beneficial results in an Opon,
fair and reasonable manner, and they have
suffered defeat at the hands of those who
should have respected their position, il
they did not stand side by side with them
in their efforts-lO o. 5. Journal.