The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-09-07
How the Boy, are Ruined.

In late number of Punch, prodigal
son who has gone to the bad isrepre-
sented as saying to his father in answer
to q stern rebuke: '.Ah, it's all very
well for you to talk father. It's pre-
cious easy to keep straight on nothing
year. and you were thrown penniless on
the world at fourteen! I should like to
have. seen you in my circumstances,
after a public school and college educa-
| ton, and an allowance of f500 per an.
mum ever since" 1t must be admitted
that the young mans defence was I'M
answerable-a father who had been
guilty of such lack of wisdom in the
training of his son had no right to blame
anybody but himself if the son turned
out badly. He had in fact tempted his
boy to dissipation and then chided him
for yielding.
This is fair example of the way in
which scores of boys are ruined yearly,
especially in our large cities. Parents
supply them literally with money, per-
NIT them to spend their time as they
please, and are Mortified some day by
the discovery that their darling boy is
sot or villain. Nothing can be more
disastrous for boy than too much
spending money and too much spare
time to spend it in. OF course we all
think that our boys are the best in the
world, that we have so carefully in
stilleS the principles of right living into
their minds that they will not fall vic
tins to the temptations that swallow up
other boys. And in this blind conf
dence many parents go on till some dis
graceful or criminal act opens their
eyes to the real state of the case. New
York is full of yeung men, the sons OF
rich fathers who themselves began life
as poor boys, who have nothing to do
but to spend their large allowances in
the way that will do them the most
harm. Their dars and nights are passed
in the compaRDnship of youths as
empty-headed as themselves, varied by
association with men of doubtful repu-
tation and women whose reputation is
not in the least doubtful. What but
misery, degradation and crime can be
the ultimate result of such life? If
fathers will sew the wind they must not
complain when they reap the whirlwind.
Onlv less disastrous than rash indul-
gence is the policy of stern repression.
Some rich fathers frightened by the
ruin OF theT neighbours boys, bring up
their own in the most rigid way. Their
BOYS never have any spending-money
that they do not have to account for to
the last cent, and not much even on
those terms. Their boys are kept under
strict surveillance, and are not allowed
b go anywhere without permission.
When their education IS finished they
are put into the counfing-room or the
Office, and compelled TO work as hard
asauy poor boy. No attempt is made
to interest them in the business or pro-
fession thus chosen ter them, and they
naturally feel for it only disgust and
repugnance. Well. one day the father
dies. and large fortune falls to the
boys thus trained. They proceed to
make ducks and brakes of it after the
most approved fashion. Never having
been trained to the right use of money,
they spend it more profuSely than the
boys who have always had it; and
having always been kept under special
restraint rs to their habits, they Plunge
into the widest kind of dissipation.
The very anxiety 1.-THE father to keep
his sons from evil has turned out to be
the chief instrument of their ruin.
These are the two extremes which are
seen every day in such city IS New
York. 1t is of course true that in the
great majority of homes no such des.
perate state of things exists, but the
eases we have typitied are all too com.
mon. The safe middle course between
over-indulgence and undue severity is
not perhaps easy to hit, yet it must be
attained approximately unless boys
character is to be hopelessly spoiled.
On the whole, we suppose that over
indulgence is responsible for the ruin OF
more boys than any other cause. The
tendency of American fathers and
mothers is too much to live for their
children only, to sacrifice themselves in
order to crafty their whims and ex-
travagaut notions. to efface themselves
socially for the sake of their advance
ment. When character is not utterly
ruined by such system, there is great
danger that will be marred by selfish
ness, and by the lack of that consider
81 L., IL IL, ~ ~