National Republican., 1883-01-31
DIET for sluggers-batter.cakes.


THE father of twin babies needs no alarm
clock.
SOMETIMES fifty thousand people skate in
Central park by night
The boy always goes right to the core when
he gets hold of an apple.
BY THE way, another of the Balal5lava "six
hundred has Just died.
THE Methodist Historical society, of Balti-
more, has been reorganlzed.
Mrs. SToNEwALL JACKSON has been visit
ing friends in Columbia, s.. c.
THERE are said to be one hundred thousand
colored Baptiss in South Carolina.
SOME men are so lacking in hospitality that
they will not even entertain an idea.
LOWELL Currier: DIR. - is a Phi. D., and
! there are folks who call him D. PHI
THE New York Suns London correspondent
compares Prince Napoleon to George Francis
Train.
Is your ma sick again? ?" "oh, no, ma is
healthy enough now. She has got now fur-lined
cloak"
EDWIN BOOTH was called before the curtain
eighteen times when he appeared as King Lear in
Berlin.
AN Englishman has invented stirrup
|
thrown.
If you do not wish to hurt his feelings do
not call him tramp. Refer to him as transient
gentleman.
THE mania for adulteration is so great that
you can't buy quart of sand and be sure that 1t is
| not half sugar.
GRANDFATHER RoEssLY, aged 93 is dead in
Fairfield county, Ohio. lilo fought under Napo-
| leon at Waterloo.
A SOFT answer may turn away wrath but
It is far safer to trust to tho legs in case the other
party is real mad.
THE oldest living ex-United States senator
is Joseph ciley, of New Hampshire, who is now
sturdy farmer Of 92.
IT is easy to see why Eugenie went back
to Paris. The good lady wanted to see her name
in tho society columns once more.
"MAN wants but little hero below" Don't
you bolieyeany such rubbish. He wants all ho
can get, and the more he gets the more he wants.
OLIVER DoUD BYRON, the well-known
actor, Is building new and beautiful cottage at
Long Branch, in Queen Anne style, to cost sIO,0OO
CINCINNATI, the Paris, Berlin, and Dublin
and Tophet of America, has more churches in pro.
portion to population than any other American
city.
A SYRACUSE sleigh 100 years old is driven
by man OF s5 and pulled by horse in his thirty
fifth year. They haven't run over anybody this
winter.
Gov. BUTLERs executive messenger is a
colored man, q French subject by birth, southern
slave by education, and republican by pre-
ference.
GEN. BEAUREGARD resembles courtier of
| Louis XIV days, and is in reality handsome old
man, with white mustache, ruddy countenance,
and gray hair.
THE czar has made up his mind to be
crowned. That is a commendable resolution. A
czar without crown Is good deal like dog
without a tail.
Miss SARGENT daughter Of the American
minister In Berlin, is reported engaged to an off,
Ger attached to the troops that do service at the
emperor's palace.
PRINCE CHARLES, of Germany, who died
the other day at the age of SO, had been in the
habit of smoking from eighteen TO twenty four
strong cigars daily.
Miss NANCY CARRINaToN, n relative of
President Monroe, died in Chicago Saturday,
having lived through the administration of every
president except Mr.. Arthur's.
MISS PIKE, living near Talladega, Ala, and
Mr.. Thomas Hays were married at 1880 o'clock
Tuesday night. At O'Clock the same night she
eloped with young man named Rucks. one of
the guests.
ONE Chicago pawnshop has loaned money on
1900 revolvers during the past year. This will 80
far toward explaining why the criminal classes OF
Chicago now use a sand-club ON their victims.
They have not yet redeemed their revovers.
Mr.. AND Mrs. L. p. MORTON entertained
at dinner recently at their residence in Paris M.
Barholdi whose statue of liberty is 10 be placed on
Bedloes island. The company was very dlstin-
guished, and the dinner was followed by a recep-
tion.
THE Earl of Aylcsford and Sir George Chet-
wynd were among the passengers on the Cunard
) steamship Bothnia, which arrived yesterday. Sir
George is favorite of Mr.. Langtry's wife, and has
a fortune which can easily discount Freddie-for-
revenue-only.
EXPERIENCE has shown that iron steam
ships are very dangerous in case of collisions; so
the only plan now 10 increase ocean travel will be
to build vessels entirely of India rubber. coll
lision between vessels would hardly do more than
give the passengers the grand bounce
, FRANK ROSE, a river pilot, Of Louisville
{ died at Mobile where his remains was placed in
a costly casket and shipped home by express.
with @. o. d. bill ofSl3i. A relative sued out a
writ OF delivery, armed with which q constable
took the corpse from its elaborate receptacle apd
gave 1t to friends for burial, leaving the express
ompany to return the casket.
particularly fit TO be drug clerks and number
are already employed in the best stores. "They
( seem to learn by intuition" says an employer;
| zone look or word sutiices where mau would
require hundred words ofinstructlon. OF When my
woman clerk has matter in hand am certain
that my order will be carried out"
A SOME anonymous but presumably pious
person has been in the habit for many yeals
of sending NJ, Renan this darkly suggestive
sentence: 81 pourant Il await un enfer -
; "Yet If there should be a HE'LL" NJ. Renan
{ says that he is much obliged to the person who
is SO anxious far his souls welfare, " But
: hell" he adds 80 suppositlon very incon-
slsent with what we know OF divine good
: ness. Moreover, II there be one, can conscien-
tiously affirm that have not deserved It, A
4 small amount of purgatory would, perhaps, be
j, fair and would run the chance Of that as paCp
T. disc would come next; and pous souls hope,
, would obtain indulgences 10 shorten my stay in
purgatory The infinite goodness that have OK
u peienced In this world inspires me with cons
' viction that at least an equal goodness peTyad0l