Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1883-09-14
GOOD DINNER.
\ Gay Jo:Ier--N Man who Could Eat
Flies and Man who Couldn't -Stomails
SOrter Outen Fix.

|
SOrter Outen Fix.
A fashionably dressed young IN;
. sat III restaurant eating q dim
for which he had long waited. Ju
as he buried his front teeth into IL
breast OF a quail. a smart fellow wi
/; sat near, eating Boiled corn, locke
up and said:
Excuse NE, sir. but just now
saw you swallow fly in your milk
The young man pushed back h
chair and meditated for few m,
ments. He gradually grew pale an
finally went ont into the back var
from which unsavory precinct cam
sounds ventriloquial in depth. Th
victim passed hurriedly through tn
dining room, not even looking at hi
dinner, but seizing his hat and seeb
ing the street, while an uncertain
and not altogether satisfied expires
sion played in sickly smirk upon hi
face.
The smart young fellow and a sap
lent companion, who had joined him
chnckled over the joke.
Hold on said the smart fellow
there is farmer over there. a regu
lar squatter Wen have some fur
with him"
he old farmer, when the joker ap
preached. said:
Squat. stranger, an hep yo'se'f."
mo, thank You, | have lust eaten
l wanted to ask you if-excuse me
sir, you swallowed a fly then?"
What did you want?"
Il FAY, excuse me, yon swallowed q
fly"
"Sari inly I'll excuse you. but it
sorter pears like l oughter Ak the
pardon q the fly
Wont he make you sick?"
"Who?"
The fly"
''How do you know it was a her.
well, won't she make you sick?"
"Don't know that it was she."
My friend, you are trying to run
this into joke For the sake of
humanity called your attention to
the fact that You had swallowed a
lily and l did not expect to be drawn
into a discussion concerning the sex
of the insect"
That's all right, podner. No
harm done only to the fly. an ef
have put him to any trouble, 1 hope
he'll forgive me. 1 don't want
nothin' to suffer en- my account"
"Well, but won't the thing make
you sick?'
'Oh. no, fur I eat flies all the
time, though l don't particular kere
ter eat 'em alive. Now, my wife,
Nance, won't eat a dead fly, an it's
well knowed amongst all the neigh
bors, that when thar's fly eatin' goin'
on, she must have the live ones; but
the regular overseer O the fly eaters,
in my neighbood, is my son, Abe.
He's got intet the habit so strong
that he snaps at 'em all the time.
'Tother day, in church, the preacher
stopped an axed who that was
strikin' poppin' matches. I looked
aroun' an thar was Abe, fast asleep.
Jes' then a fly buzzed aroun' his
head an he snapped at him. Set
down"
The joker took seat, and after
earnest solicitation accepted toast
and a glass of milk"
''Oh, yes" continued the squatter,
fly time IS regular Celebration with
us. an when the locusts an catapil-
lars an potato bugs an army worms
comes aroun', We jes' quit work, an
gin ourselves up ter the 'joyment o
the occasion. Jes' keep yer eye on
me, stranger, an see ef 1 eat bed
bug, will yer? Now 1 don't like bed
bugs. They're to rich for me.
only like pain stuff, without any
Sunday tixins-by lingo, hope you'll
excuse me, yisef, but see that yer
amt afeerd o flies"
''How 500"
Case yer jes' swallowed one"
Are you certain, sirr looking
around with evident uneasiness.
"Reckin l know a fly when 1 see
it. 1t was all mashed with one wing
gone, but as l was sayin'-"
The joker, pale and trembling,
arose.
''Set down, for wanter tell you
don't CO."
The joker rushed for the back
yard. and again there were heard
deep sounds of ventriloquial strain.
He did not come back through the
dining room, but went Cound the
alley. and called at the front door
for his hat. The old squatter shoveled
in a knifeful of cabbage, and re-
marked:
Young feller' pears to be sick.
Reckin his stomaik is sorter outen
fix. Must be billiOnsn