South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1883-02-02
WIT AND IHUsIot

A
soup was ihick, bu, .ome,hing solid
attracted his attention within the mya.
terious depths. He fishsd on, a niece
OF pickle.
See here waiter 30 said don't /:
look as though you were spelling good
thingss'
Halo! sail the waiter, give me
that. You didn't order pickles. did yor?'
No, nor don, believe want this
soup answered the mar, ca lie wen,
fishing again and extracted a meta,
cork.
Well bless me- said the waiter. .if
that amt the identical cork TO the
Worcestershire sauce bottle. BEEN
missing two days. You don't want that
CO you?'
It's mine ain, it! Didn't buy
this soup?'
You can't en-. corks. You bough.
the soup to eat. not to carry home for
the kids to play with. This amt no
bric a brac store
IL amt hey?' said the nice man what
do you call that!' He had been any
ling again and hooked tie leather end
OF pair CT suspenders.
That's mine anyway said the wal
Ter. Thars personal property. That
don't belong to Ike fsm.'
Maybe the head CT the frm is down
in here too said the nice man. If
yen ever recover the body send his
things home with il 10 his family,
and he passed out into a pursr a.mos,
phere.
While Robert Burns WAS at McTat
oace with Clark, the composer, the poet
called fer bumper OF brandy. oh
not bumper said tie musician Il
prefer two ANAL glasses Two glass
est cried Burns: Why you are like
tho LAS in Kyle who said she had RAJ
Their be kiss:d twice b.reheatied than
once with her bonnet on.
Ia sail her hair wau dyed; and
when she Indignantly said, lis false =
he said he presumed So
julia, my litls chsrub,' whom does
your sjster Emma return"
i don't know Didn't she ssy @
nJthing before she wept agay?'
she said il you came 70 gee her.
she'd Do gone til Doomsday'
1ou re as sSea. Ga a peach he said
pa;tiug her softly on the check. Yes
Eau-NurmrTsd' smuggling clos, to hin,
I'm 3 livingstone.
He WANTED TO PosE.-A resident
OF Park street had photographed come
up the other day for tho purpos. Of to-
king view Of his residence, and the
msn Of the camera had just got into po-
siIion when along came al old coon with
bucksar on his arm, end wanted t.
know what gas up.
Going to photograph the house, was
the reply.
Then susss I'll pose remarked the
old man. I'll take = position st the left
Of the gate and represent TIE statue Of
industry
The members OF the family esme out
and arranged themselves, and the man
called out:
Here, old man, you want to get out
OF thatl'
Can't represent Industry p
NO sirP
Can't stand over there and repre-
sort Laziness g
No sir! We don't want you in tho
group at ALL
'Lemme represent the sleeping Beeu.
ty.'
You 60 away
lie dre" or to one eide, the passing
teams halted to give the artist chance.
anG directly The plate was made. Eycry
body rushed forward when IL was roady
for Inspection, and the old nan vas one
Of The FIRST. rs he plate was held up
ne giggied and tickled, and finally burst
into loud laugh IIe had lodged a.
round the corner Of The house, and lis
full Gsu;o wss revealed bsbjud the
family
What 10 you reproIon. in that aiti-
tude p stsrnly inquired ths pholagra-
pher.
We'll, I reckon tlacs a pretty good
pose Tor conlcrtmcuf.'