Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1883-08-15
BRIGHT BITS.

CATS are musical because their insides
are composed mostly Of fiddle-strings.-
Exchange.
Nike-"An' what are We diggln' out
that hole for. Pat%' Pat-"Arrah. an
it's not the hole I'm afther diggin' ont. I'm
diggin' the dirt out and LAWN the hole"
JUDGEMENTS are more common in sum-
mer than in winter. 1t is because the
doors and windows are all open and not
much clothing is needed.-NelC Orleans
Picdglme.
POLICEMAN to group of small boys. )
Come. now, move on. There's moth
ing the matter here" Sarcastic bOy-''Of
course there isn't. If there was you
wouldn't be here"
GLOW shall l have my bonnet
trimmed asked Maria, $50 that it will
| agree with my compleXiOnT' ''If you
want il to match your face, have it plain"
replied the hateful Harriet.
'9WHAT makes the milk so warm 2" the
| milkman was asked, when he brought the
can to the door one morning. "Please
num-" he answered, ''the pump handles
broke, and missus took the water from the
| boiler"
A CERTAIN little Pharisee, who was
praying for his big brother, had good deal
Of human nature in him, even if he was only
six years old. He prayed: 80 Lord, bless
brother Bill, and make him as good boy
as | am
ONE MAN was asked by another, with
whom he was not on the best of terms,
where he had taken up his abode. "0h,"
he replied. PPM living by the canal!
should be delighted if you would drop in
some evening"
THE Maysville Bulletins successful
rhvming of soil, and' with "HOlland' is
great step forward in Kentucky poetry.
The day is not far off when we shall be
able to make a rhyme of 'pen-wiper'' and
'.sOckdOlager. y COuier-JOurRdl.
ONE EVENING, at a well-known ac-
tress' performance in the "Hunchback."
when she said. 'Clitford, why don't you
speak to me?' one of the spectators re-
piled. in an audible voice, 'DO, Clifford;
would, if she'd talk to me in that way"
'MY CASE is just here" said citizen
to a lawyer. 1.-The plaintiff Will swear
that hit him. | will swear that l did
not. Now what can you lawyers make
out of that if we go to trial?'' A hundred
dollars easy" was the reply.-BeRch and
Bar.
IT was at the close of the wedding
breakfast. One of the guests arose, and,
glass in hand. said: Il drink to the health
of the bridegroom. May he see many days
like thisr' The intention was good, but
the bride looked up as if something dis
pleased her.
THE NOEs.-The addresses of a certain
young man having been declined by a
Young lady he paid court to her sister,
I'How much you do resemble your sis
teri" said he on the evening Of the first
call. s'You have got the same hair and
the same forehead and the same eyes"
"And the sam noes,'' she added quickly.
He has stopped calling at the house.
DIGNITY-"W Veil, and how about your
marriageg - Il have brokenit off," "You
haven't have, your" eyes. My intended
father-in-law wanted references" "And
YOU were offendedT "Not at all; only,
as knew he would have broken off the
engagement afterwards, | preferred to
have the start of him, and broke it off my
self 1t is more dignitied, you know"
ssTHE PRISONER was a friend of mine,"
said the witness, in answer to a question
of the counsel for the prosecution. ''DO
you desire the court and jury to believe
that YOU are well acquainted with hims"
''No; | can't say that | am" "Wel,
what are we to understand by the state
ment that he was friend of yOursV
Just this" continued the witness. "He
borrowed five pounds of me once, and
never returned it." 500 you consider
that an evidence of friendship" 81 do.
If he had paid it back he would have
wanted to borrow ten more"