, 1883-06-21

And thus, N various Styles rom Varl-
Gus motives, the Stub Mountaineers
commented on and approved of the lect-
ure which was TO be delivered at the
lyceum on that Wednesday evening.
Squire Dooley stroked his long beard
as he checked his gray pony before the
village store.
q suppose my girls viii insist on
going" said he; "Eut there are so few
things going on at Stub Mountain that
it seems a pity to deny them little rec
reation.
And the landlord of the Stub Mountain
hotel chuckled
at was an Ill wind that blew good to
nobody" he said, land any popular SEN
sadon was good for business.
This was on Tuesday. Upon the
Wednesday morning a stout gentleman
in = chaise drew up to the hotel and
strutted up to the bar, with very rubi.
cund face and little, fiery eyes.
MARY Smith lectures here tonight"
said he.
4 guess you're about right there,
Squire" said the landlord, feeling in his
pocket for the bundle of tickets which
the lyceum proprietor had authorized
him to sell. a poplar subject, too.
You can read all about it on the bulletin
board out there, and"
"I forbid it " said the stout gentle
man, growing redder and more apoplec-
nc with every moment.
Land o Goshen!" calculated ths
an1inri
"She is my wife," said the stranger.
my name is sSmith-Zerubbabe Smith
and 1 won't be disgraced by any Of
this public-lecturing nonsense"
eyes, 1 know" said the landlord |;
"but l don't b'lieve the law will uphold
ye in it, Squire, arter the tickets are
sold and"
"Hang the law I" shouted Mr.. Zerub-
babel Smith, bringing his gloved fist
down among the glasses with a bang.
81 don't care two straWs for the law !!
My wife is my wife, and won't have her
making Merry Andrew of herself here
or anywhere alse When do you expect
herP"
1.-The room was engaged from 10
o'clock, " falterod the landlord "but-"
every WELL" roared the red-faced
man, "Tll just go snd stroll around the
village, and you let me know when she
arrives-d'ye hear?"
Mr.. Zeruhbabel Smith had hardly
betaken himself to the shadow of the
old elms on the village green, when an
| elderly woman of a starched appear
ance came in, with a striped carpet-bag
on one arm, and carrying a gingham
umbrella in the other hand.
Is this the Stub Mountain Lyceum?"
said she, primly.
"No, marml" said the landlord.
"This 'ere's the tavern. The lyceum
amt open till o'clock. Want to buy
tickets for the lecture ?"
Certainly not /" said the elderly
female.
"P'raps you'd like to engage room,"
said the landlord, with glance at the
carpet-bag.
Nothing of the sort |" said the lady.
The font of the landlords imagination
was hopelessly drained dry by this time.
He said nothing more, but stared hard
at the starched female.
al wish to see Miss Smith," said she,
abruptly.
"Eh ?" said the landlord.
"The lecturer on-Women's Rights"
with little grimace at the words, as if
they had bitter taste.
"She amt arriv' yet" said the land
lord.
al do not intend to allow this outrage
on public taste !" said the lady, vehe-
mently.
Marin ?" said the landlord.
81 am Miss Smiths mother!'
"Be you?" gasped mine host.
"And here I set until she presents
herself" said Mrs. Smith, depositing
herself on the nearest chair, and clasping
both hands firmly over the umbrella
handle.
The landlord looked feebly at her, and
almost within the same second in hurried
short, over-dressed lady, with curls,
iewelry, bangles and scarlet shawl,
while a shabby black-silk skirt trailea
its fOnnces over the dusty floor.
Landlord" said she, stake down
those posters at once /"
"What for, marm?" cried the poor
an.
"It's swindlingi" said the curly fair
one; downright swindIingl We are
Partners, and Miss Smith is to lecture
nowhere unless sing ballads in the in
termissions. It's share and share alike
/, the profits and the expenses, and I
won't be cheated And SO you may tell
her. landlord !"
The landlord smote his forehead in
despair.
Be L goin' crazy?" he said, cor is
the whole 'varsal world agee? Miss
smith amt here, nor Mary Smith amt,
nor Mrs. Smith, nor none of the Smiths.
as know of ="
Landlord" said the curly lady,
screwing up her thin lips, "you are in
tie conspiracy against mel"
The landlord uttered a groan.
'' wish to goodness I'd never heard
OF the whole thing" said he.
.' But if there's law and Justice in the
anil, I'll have my rights!" screamed
she excited lady. "TIl telegraph to
Boston 10 a lawyer. I'll have up the
nstabie. III"
The landlord was vaguely considering
il his own mind whether it was best to
"a under the counter, escape by the
;Ack window or seize his grandfather's
uSty musket from the iron hook where