The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-19
his scheme for Peaes.

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A rather slim chap, with rippling CO
nary hair, stepped into fashionable es.
adjustment where arms are sold, and
called unto the clerk:
Have you any sef-cocking seven
,hooters?"
"Yes," replied the clerk; "would you
ike to look at them?
~ would"
In about two minutes the counter
was covered with revolvers, and the
man with canary hair examined them
and said:
"Give me SIX"
The clerk seemed astonished, but tied
up the pistols; at which moment the
customer commenced to fan himself
with his helmet, and remarked:
SCOT any shot-guns?"
eyes. What Kind do you prefer
plain or Illuminated steel?'
doesn't make any difference. Give
me about two of each kind"
The clerk thought he had struck
lunatic; but he didn't care whether he
took the cash of a sane man or lu-
matte. So he tied the guns up, and
was about to announce the amount OF
the bill, when the young man inquired:
"DO you keep cannOns?"
"We have some nice brass cannOns
that carry twenty-pound solid ball, ;"
replied the clerk.
"Are they mounted on wheels?"
"They are"
"Then give me three"
The clerk was considerably amazed,
but took the order for the cannons
down on paper, and said:
Now, is there anything else you
would like to see?"
"Yes; would like very much to see
some daggers."
1--WE have fine stock of daggers."
replied the clerk, as he placed several
specimens on the counter. ''Here is
one with a solid silver handle which
comes little higher than the others. "
- will take six of the silver-handled
ones. Now let me look at a few
swords"
"What kind do You want? We have
a number of different styles
"What kind, for instance" asked
the canary-haired youth.
"Well, we have the cavalry saber-"
"Give me two"
"And we have the cutlass."
"The kind used by pirates?' asked
the long, slender youth, with smile
that betrayed his anxiety.
"Yes, the very kind"
81 will take six of them.'
"Now we have some Turkish cine.
tars."
81 want four of them. / also want
two claymores, just like the one in the
window"
The clerk took down his order, and
began to fancy how much his employer
would think of him for selling such
big bill, when the customer said:
81 want half a dozen Springfield
rifles, with bayonets on them"
81 will take your order and fiji it to-
morrow. Is there anything else?"
Eyes; want some Earpoons and
spears"
"Those we have not in stock" said
the clerk; ''but we can get them and
deliver them with the shot-guns."
"Now want some hand-grenades
and dynamite.
"We don't keep them"
Don't keep them?" replied the
customer, in surprise; "don't keep
them?"
mo"
"Well, then, send all those things up
70 my hotel, c. o. d.
The man presented his card to the
clerk, who thanked him for purchasing
such nice big bill, and said:
Il hope to see you when you play in
New York"
81 play in New York? I don't
play.
beg your pardon" said the clerk,
apologetically; 81 thought you were the
manager and star of a sensational dra-
matte company. playing Far West
blood-curdling piece, and that you came
for properties-'
"Oh, no." laughed the man with vel.
low hair; II am simply going down to
Texas to start paper. There are GER
tain journalistic amenities down there
that desire to observe to the letter.
don't wish to be mistaken for an anna
r."-Puck.