davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
josh RiIlings,s Guide to Health.

Never run into debt if you can find any
thing else to run into.
Be honest, if you can; if you can't be hon
est. pray Tor help.
Marry young, and ii you make hit keep
cool and don't brag about it.
Be kind to your mother-in-law, and if
necessary, pay her board at some good hotel.
Battle thoroly once a week in soft water
and kasteel soap, and avoid tite boots
Exercise in open air, but don't saw wood
until you are obliged to.
Laff every time you feel tickled, and laf
once in while ennyhow.
Eat hash washing days, and be thankphull,
if you have to shut your eyes to do it.
Hold the baby half the time, and always
start the fire in the morning and put on the
teakettle.
Don't jaw back-it proves that you are as
big phool as the other phello.
Never borrow what you are able to buy,
and always have some things you won't
lend.
Never git in a hurry; you can walk good
deal further in day than You can run.
Don't swear; IL may convince you, but it is
sure not to convince Others.
If you have daughters, let your wife bring
beat all your theories.
Don't drink too much new cider and
however mean you may be, don't abuse
kow.
Luv and respect your wife ennyway; it is
a good deal cheaper than to be all the time
wishing she was somehow different.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Married In a Great Hurry.

St Louis Post Dispatch.
The quickest courtship on record" said
one old resident was that of Dr. Nick Nc
Dowell, who, driving along the street in his
buggy one day, saw beautiful girl standing
at the window. He Immediately stopped
and hitched his horse, rang the bell, inquired
the ladys name, was ushered into the par
lor. announced his own name, said he Was
pleased with her appearance and wished to
marry her at once Nothing but the knowl-
edge that she was actually in the presence of
the celebrated physician kept her from faint
ing. To her plea of surprise at this unex-
pected announcement he only replied Now
or never When she asked to take week
to consider he said l am going down street
to attend critical case and have no time to
spare right now
"'Give me a day, then
"'Fll tell you what I'll do. When am
through with this professional visit I'll drive
around and get preacher. If you've made
up your mind to marry me by that time all
right And he left her breathless and unable
to articulate another word. When he re-
turned they were quietly married. No
cards. "
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
The Worst On Record.
Boston Journal.

Boston Journal.
The worst pun on record, probably, was re-
Gently made in this city. Two sinful men
were conversing. together, when one of them
said that he never saw a word that he could
not pun upon. and Offered to bet S. that his
companion could not mention one which
should confuse him. The other promptly
accepted the wager and named "Nlephisto-
pheles' as the word upon which he should
make his claim good This choice gave the
boaster pause for moment, and then he
said: II can double up my fist awful easy.
but not more easily than | can make pun
upon that word" After some mental study
the other saw where the pun came in, and
paid the money that he had lost with as good
a race as he could command.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
July.


When the scarlet cardinal tells
Her dream to the dragon hy,
And the Lazy breeze makes a Iest IN the trees,
And murmurs a lullaby,
IL is July.
When the tangled cobweb pulls
The corn flowers blue cap away,
And the lilies tall lean over the wal u
To bow TO the butterfly,
1t is July.
When the heat like mist vail floats,
And peoples flame in the rye,
Aad the silver note in the sGrsamlets throat
Has Softened almost to a sigh,
1t is July.
When the hours are so still that time
Forgets them and let's them lie
Meath petals pink till the night stars wink
at the sunset in the sky.
1t ia July.
When each fiuger-post by the way
Says that Slumbertown Is nigh;
When the grass Is tall and the roses fall,
Aud nobody wonders why,
1t Is July.
Susan Hartley Sweet.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Advice to Young Preachers.
Burlington Hawkeye.

Don't be too digniied. Rigidity isn't dig
nifty. The wooden Indian who stands before
the cigar store never bends and never laughs.
But he isn't majestic, and he isn't dignifed,
by a long chalk. Don't be wooden Indian.
Better be q live, wild one, hair, paint, grease,
dirt, and all. l wouldn't carry a pistol in
my hip pocket if were you; but if you
have a gun and love to shoot a day in the
marsh or on the meadows may infuse new
life in your sermons. l hunt a great deal,
both in and out of game season. | used to
a trouble to carry it, and 1 was always leav
ing the caps or wetting the powder, so l gave
the gun away. l shoot just as much game
without it, think, as 1 used to bring down
with it. and have just as good time. So
can YOU.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Poppies in Our Wheat.

Let no blame upon US fall,
Thrifty ones of cot and hall,
That, while We take care to hoard
Corn anu wine for winters board,
We beside the hedgerow lie,
Needless how bright hours go by.
Wonder not we dread no want,
When the year is bare and gaunt;
Idle bread we have to eat
Popples grew amidst our wheat.
Blame not us, ye jewellers blithe,
who have lodged the rake and scythe,
And with fan and fail no more
Tread the granary's breezy floor;
Though, with humming wire and flute,
The boon season well We suit,
Call us not by word or glance;
We will neither feast nor dance.
Blame not Us that sleep liz sweet
Topples grew amidst our wheat.
Edith NJ. Thomas, in the Critic.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14

Two lovers sat in shady neck;
l1ntenI was she upon her book;
Intent was he upon her hair
THAT crowned face SO passing fair,
ST wonder" she said, elf it can be true"
al woa1er," he said, ''if eyes so blue"
'tPrsy, don't interrupt, but hear me out"
''Or sweeter lips or more charming pout-"
"As Darwin said, that we all descend"
@Or cheeks where such roses and lilies blend"
stFr0m the ape2 I'm sure don't think"
s'Or ears just ttnged with the sea-shels pink"
st do, but Of you I'm not quite 40 sure"
.S'Graced fair maiden sweetly beforef"
when you-when say that now we have found
The missing link by which two hearts are
boundP
Two lovers sat in shady nook.
Forgotten was Darwin's latest book
Soft kisses fell on the golden hair,
Soft bushes stole DER the face so fair
Mary A. Sawyer, in the Continent.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
A Sudden shower.

The noon is tropical. The rose
Leans like a yearning mouth to meet
The kisses that the zephyr blows
FulLnavored with the fragrant heat
Tho breezy naples seem to quaf
The shade like wine. and, thrilled With glee.
Toss up their leafy hands and laugh
And lisp and whisper tipsily.
Asin the sight the air afioat
The meadow glimmers on to us,
A elsmoured murmur, high, remote,
Falls on the hearing tremulous-
The pent-up anger of the storm!
The dust grows ashen. with fright,
And. rising, reels in phantom form,
And passes in convulsive flight
with petulant and gusty breaths
The winds come waltzing as they may,
Till cen the sunshine vanishes
As it were whirled and blown away.
T Barefooted boys scud up the street,
Or skurry under sheltering sheds,
Ana school girl faces, pale and sweet.
CLEAN from the shawls about their heads.
Doors bang; and mother-voices call
From alien homes; and rusty gates
Are slammed, and high above it all
the thunder grim articulates.
And then, abrupt, the rain! the rain!
The earth lies gasping; and the eyes
Behind the streaming window-pane
Smile at the trouble of the skies.
The highway smokes; sharp echoes ring;
The cattle bawl, and cowbells clanE:
And into town comes galioping
Tho farmers horse, with steaming flank.
Tho swallow dips beneath the caves
And fiirts his plumes and folds his wings;
And under the catawba leaves
Ths caterpillar ourls and clings.
The bnmble-bee is pelted down
The wet stem of the hollyhock;
And salenly, in spattered brown,
The cricket leaps the garden-wak
Within, the baby claps his hands
And crows with rapture strange and vague;
Without, beneath the rosebnsh stands
dripping rooster on one leg.
james Whitcomb Riley.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
The Latest in Hot weather Directions.


Keep cool. Wear cabbage leaf in your
hat Carry sun umbrella. Don't walk on
the sunny side of the street Don't drink
too much ice water. Nor beer. Nor spirits.
Don't overwork. Don't worry. Knock Off
business in the heat of the day. Take sponge
baths every few minutes. Get on your 500
600 yacht and run up and down the harbor.
Let your business slide. and retire to the
cool, shady groves. Don't read political
editorials. Never mind about the next Presi-
dent Put it on ice. Cultivate perspiraton.
Sleep all you can, Live in your bathroom.
Think of the poor. Never mind charity,
but think of them in some cool place.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
A Nubian Face on the Nile.

That night we touched the lily shore.
And then passed on, in night indeed,
Against the far white waterfall.
I Jaw no more, shall know no more
or her for aye. And You who read
This broken bit of dream will smile,
Half-vexed. that saw aught at all.
Tho waves struck s5rOphes ON the shore,
And all the sad song of the oar
That long, long night, against the Nile,
Was: Nevefmcfe and nevermore
This side that shad0wy shore that lies
Below the leafy Paradise.
-Joaouin Miller
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Death.

Death. II thou be or be not, as was said,
Immortal; il thou make us naught, or we
Survive, thy power is made but of our dread,
Death, If thou be.
Thy might is made out of our fcar of thee;
Who fears thee not hath plucked from off thine
head
The crown OF cloud that darkens earth and sea.
Earth, sea and sky, rain or vapor shed,
Shall vanish; all the shows of them shall flee;
Then shall We know full surely, quick or dead, :
Death, If thou be.
"A. G. Swinburne
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Died Before the War.



We have read that st. Peter had a wife and
a mother-in-law, and that the latter was sub
iect to attacks of malaria, but until we
picked up New Orleans paper yesterday we
were ignorant of the fact that ST. Peter had a
sister living in the Crescent City. We notice
in an advertisement that she is in charge of
a convent school, and signs herself SISTER
St Peter" The distinguished brother has
been dead some time. He died before the
war hrOka ont
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Depends on circumstances.

New York Graphic.
''At fifty mans habits become fixed" are
the words of a wise man. That may depend
amuch on how the man is fixed Make a pau
per millionaire at sixty and observe how
much dxedness .will attach to all the habits
formed in pauperism. Again, an active,
growing and observing man or woman may
change habits, if found to be injurious, as
quickly at fifty as at twenty. Capacity to
change habit is proof of power and self
control
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14

both Lydia f. PInkhams Vegetable Com
pound and Blood Purifier prepared at 233
and 235 Western avenue, Lynn, Mass Price of
either, 81. Six bottles for IS. Sent by mail in
the form of pills. or of lozenges, receipt OF
price, 81 per box for either. Mrs. Pinkham freely
answers all letters of inquiry. Enclose Sc stamp.
Send for pamphlet. Mention this paper.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14

My love Is like flame that circles me,
And the dusky center in that fame.
Changed by its light. all things on land and sea
Wear new beauty, bear sweeteF name.
% blessed flannel pure Transforming light!
When thou art summoned deaths eclipse to bear,
Thy shad0wy center will dissolve in night
And die OF its own darkness and despair. O. A. D.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-07-14
Our Progress.

As stages are quickly abandoned with the COM
pletion of railroads, the huge, drastic cathart-
10 pills, composed Of crude and bulky medicines,
are quickly abandoned with the introduction of
DIR. Pieroe's pheasant Purgative Pellets which
are sugar-coated and little larger than mustard
seeds, but composed of highly conc nprated veg
stable extracts By druggists.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1883-03-14

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The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1883-03-14

his brother by the provision of the will
ameha III, the question of the descent
perry beld and possessed by his late Ma
nehameha " came before the Supreme
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1883-03-14

3 10 gu
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The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1883-03-14

the original leave to build the house there, was
permissive merely, and did not accompany or
grow out Of the contract of sale. With great
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1883-03-14
IDLE GOSSIP
u,HEREIs No IDLE GOSSIP HOW

fTNHEkE Is NOIDLE GOSSIP HOW
Il ever that the undersigned viii take Portraits 70
Photographic Art, aud on the most Re2s2nlbe Terms
but Il T. idle gossip which SAYS he VIII lot ~ 70
everyone who czIi be 5ufedi and never treated anyone
OF the way, and never VIII treat anyone otherse
than IN proper manner Do not listen 10 gossip but
como and see Tor ourscf-t1erc j. always I've sides "a
siory. - sml u Z. CHASE.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1883-03-14

Fine Black Cloth Frook Goats and Pants.
Bucksldn Sacks, Pants and Suits,
Felt, Mohair. Drill, Flannel Sacks and Pants,
llfar.f Slafrfa TL.i-I---.-
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

temper of any considerable portion of the
American people if he imagines that by
scandalous and infamous personal attack
upon Senator Logan he can assist himself to
reverse the verdict of history, which has
fixed an indellibe stamp of shame upon his
name. Mr.. Lincoln thought Porter should
have been shot, and President Garfield, as is
well known, was of the opinion that the YER
dict of the court-martial in his case ought
not TO be set aside. A great weight of mill
tary authority, ever since the Schofeld
Board OF Revision, is in favor of the justice
of the sentence passed upon him. President
Arthur has issued pardon of that portion
of the verdict over which the executive had
control, and with this Porter had better be
satisfied. 1t is certain he will have to be if
he proposes to vilify and SANDER all who
may see fit to oppose his restoration to the
army and his raid upon the treasury.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13
SPIRIT OF THE PRESS.

WHATEVER may be the decision OF the Supreme
Court in reference to the SCOTT law, the time
will come when Ohio and every State will adopt
high license rs the suresu means of putting a
check upon the worst features OF the liquor
traffic, Cleveland Leader.
1T Is not to be taken for granted that Wales
ways been a Liberal. 1t impels powerfully tow
ard the conservatism OF TOryism to ascend the
throne. About the first thing the king
would DO confronted with would be demands for
various concessions which he would regard as
encroachments upon the royal prerogatlve, and
the probabilities are that In SIX months he
would be- confirmed Tory.-Cincinnati News
journal.
IT (the silver coinage aot) has done no good
whatever. unless the furnishing of a market for
a commodity possessed by private individuals
can be regarded In that light With the disap-
pearance of tho last possibility of tho adoption
of an alternate standard by the great nations of
the world. the last poor excuse for the
continuance of tho silver coinage van
ishes into thin air. 1t is high time that Con-
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

THE federal court at Keokuk, Ia, init
mates that the reissue of the Gliddon and
Kelly patents on barbed wire fence will be
held as invalid, and that all the parties sued
charged. This will be a triumph for the
farmers generally, and especially for those of
Iowa, who are largely interested in a local
manufacturing establishment that turns out
vast amounts OF fencing of the same pattern
as the Gliddon and Kelly make. We hope
the intimation of the court will be confirmed
by the final decision yet to be rendered by
the Supreme Court.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

Rress should deal with this humbug, which Ia
still commanded by law and paid for by the
people.-st. Paul Pioneer Press.
SUPPOSE this country [Chinal swarming W th
q depraved people and controlled by shrewd in-
telllgent, ambitions men who know how to
Work upon the Ignorance and prejudices of the
masses, should discover by an encounter with
france That they have an undreamed OF power
In the Held and on the seas2 To what oOnse-
quences might not such q revelation leadf
New York World.
WE have banks and railroads, mines, furnaces
and factories, because Republican ideas have
Tor many years prevailed in the Governments.
NOW, what is an unhappy Democrat to dof
Shall he avOw his old Democratic Ideas2 II 40.
he makes war on the existing civilization. Or
shall he accept and rejoice In the existing civili-
cation, with all its magnificent triumphs2 If so,
ne makes war on the Democratic past, trample5
upon ts traditions, rejects it's IDEAS ana insults
the memory of its departed leaders.-New York
Tribune.
PERHAPS they Ohe food adulterators) take
rank as pillars of the church, supporters OF
educational institutions, or other charities; thus
purchasing IA reputation for piety or benevOlence
with the price of blood. But they are none the
less worthy Of execratiOn equally deep as that
WHICH followed the BOrgan PRISONERS, and
winch In the better future will mark the memo
~ OF the men who have waded to military glory
through the blood of thousands of their fellow
creatures in wars of conquest and sp0liatiOn.
Chicago Tribune.
THE deliberate attempt to galvanze into pO-
l1tlcal activity that Tildenism which was
thoroughly buried seven years ago under pOpu.
lar defeat, and which was then and is now syss
tenn of corruption and conseencelesS intrigue,
combined with the most treacherous and cow
ardly betrayal OF the interests of the nation, is,
to say the least, bold. II it should succeed. the
United States would have to worry along for
four years under che heaviest and most Disgrace
full load they have ever been called on to carry.
New York Times,
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13
SYmpathetic Insanity.

Troy, N. Y, June ia singular instance
of periodical insanity is exhibited in the
case of well-known young lady of great
beauty aud belonging to a very respectable
family in this city. Though permitted to
go at large, she is carefully watched, and will
doubtless soon be sent to an asylum, where
she may find rest from mental excitement
and receive proper medical treatment. The
most singular feature of the poor girls mis-.
fortune is that she suffers under the insane
attacks only at periods when her brother is
similarly suffering. He has been very vic.
lent at times, and during these attacks his
sisters mind became clouded as if in sympa-
thy with him. At other times she shows nj
evidence of disordered mind.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

ONE of the Guiteau jurors has gone insane.
He is said to be the fifteenth person con-
nected with that celebrated trial whom evil
in some form has since befallen. The super
stitious are inclined to ascribe this fatality
to the curse pronounced by the assassin on
all who had any part in his conviction; but
from a common sense point of view there is
nothing remarkable about it. The number
of human beings who escape misfortune in
every form for six successive months is small.
1t would almost seem that participants in
the Guteau trial had their full share of ca
lamity then and there; but as events prove,
they were not exempted from further afflic-
ton. The fortunate people who only en-
dured the trial at long range may thank
their lucky stars, not that they escaped the
curse but that constant attendance in the
courtroom did not weaken their minds and
undermine their bodily health.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

dency. That is as plain as a pikestaff to
anyone who remembers the Tilden tactics
year prior to the meeting of the st. Louis
convention. The year 1880 was not good
one for the old ticket. The Democracy must
be taught that no one could take them so
near the Land of Promise as the Sage of
Cipher alley. That lesson was given them.
The year 1884 is thought to be propitious for
the second advent.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

THE Milwaukee Sentinel suggests an addi-
ton to the Democratic organic law, " which
is kept standing so conspicuously at the head
OF the editorial columns of the Louisville
Courier-J ournal. 1t is this-an extract from
the Democratic national platform of 1876,
adopted at ST. Louis, when Mr.. Tilden and
Mr.. Hendricks were nominated: Gas such
hindrance Ito return to. specie paymentsl
we denounce the resumption act of 1875, and
we here demand its repeal"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-06-13

HEHE is little paragraph which embel.
fishes disgraceful chapter of American leg
islation, taken from the New York papers,
Fright Rev. Simon Vaentesi, Bishop of
Paleopolis, and Vicar Apostolic of Honan,
China accompanied by his secretary, Dr.
Abel Shin, a Chinaman by birth, arrived
yesterday from Rio Janeiro. Dr. Shin being
a Chinaman was not allowed to land. The
custom-house officers declared that it would
be direct violation of the Chinese immi-
grant act, and so compelled him to remain
aboard the vessel. The party will start for
San Francisco Immediately on the release of
DR.. Shin, and will then sail for China" And
the United States claims to be the foremost
civilized and Christian nation in the world.