The weekly chronicle. (Bozeman, Mont.) 1883-1883, 1883-05-09
A Giddy Young Wife.
Ne,c York World.

New York World.
The Washington correspondent Of the
Boston Traveller tells the story Of ven
cradle ex-member of congress from Penn
sylvania, who has been married twice,
and has for his second wife lively young
lady who is extremely fond of social gay
cites. Not long ago, says the correspond
ent, she made an engagement to accom-
pany young naval officer to one Of the
fashionable balls and told her husband
she was going, but neglecting to say she
had secured an escort. He appeared to
be pleased and said that he would &C.
company her. This was more than she
bargained for, and she resorted to various
expedients to get him to stay at home.
The more reasons she gave, the more he
was determined to go. Things were get
ting desperate when bright idea struck
her. She took the old gentleman's false
teeth and him them, and when the even
ing came he was still without those nee
essary adjuncts to mastication. He won
dered and raved, and raved and wondered
but it was no use-he couldn't find them
and finally was obliged to remain at
home, while his wife tripped gaily to her
carriage and spent a most delightful
evening.
Printers are liable to err. So, at least,
thought the young man who blushed to
the tips of his ears as he stepped up to
the society editors table: "Good morn
ing. What is it, sir?" was the affable
greeting.
"You made little mistake in your an
nouncements yesterday, sir?"
Every likely. It is almost impossible
not to make mistake somtimes. What
was it?"
"You said ME aud Lizzie Pinkins were
bothered, when we are not bothered at
all. We are betrothed, sir. Quite diff.
ference"
"Ah! presume you see the difference
now more than you will in the future.
However, I will smooth the matter out.
Good morning, sir,"-Baltimorean.
my DEAR" exclaimed loving hus-
band to his wife, II have just had my
life insured for your benefit" "Well, l
declare" said the wife, looking round
upon her family and friends with an ex-
preston Of injured innocence, "just to
think Of the selfishnes of men, and par
ticularly Of husbands. There, you've
been and had your life insured, while
your poor wife may go without any in
surance on hers. It's just what should
expect Of you'll"
Dick Liddell, one Of the members of |
the famous James gang, and who has |
been in Jail awaiting trial for many
months past, was discharged the other |
day and is again free man. There is
nothing surprising about that announce
ment. It is about what was expected all
along. When it is announced that one
of those notorious robbers and murderers
has been hung the pubic will accept it
as something remarkable.
Another minister announces his inten- |
ton to quit the pulpit and take to the
stage. By the time he has had few
fights with hotel landlords. and been set |
down as dead-beat because he cannot |
nay his bills, and falls through trap doors |
Of the stage few times, and lays himself
open to the critics comments on the
uuality of the drinks he imbibes, he will |
learn that the stage has its drawbacks as |
well as the pulpit.
One of the worst things that has been
said about the new postmaster-general
is that he is causing the Office seekers to
realize that he p assesses a backbone.
The same thing was said Of Mr.. Hayes
when he occupied the position where .
backbone of ponderous dimensions is
needed. The papers were full OF Hayes
backbone, and the result Is
hat Mr.. Hayes is now pathmaster in an
obscure Ohio town.
A man went home the other night and
ound his house locked up. After infinite
rouble he managed to gain entrance
through back window, and then dis
covered on the parlor table note from
,is wife, rending-"I have gone out; Won
vill find the key on the side Of the step" !