New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-05-16
He Gould Talk,

He Gould Talk.
''This is pretty lively weather we are
having" said battered specimen of
humanity, lounging into the political
EDITORS room and falling into chair.
1T is what we might call downright
winter.'
eyes, said the editor not looking up
from his writing.
''Scems to me an iceberg must have
foated down near our coast" said the
battered party, pulling his coat together
and turning up his color. II tell you
this is the sort of weather to season a
man for trip to the North Pole, but it
amt nothin' to what we are having
down in Boston,"
"No," said the editor, absently, as his
pen flew over the paper before him.
''Now, in Boston, its pretty cold right
along, but when you want to strike the
every day below zero racket you have
to drop in upon Canada. That's where
you strike it lively for cold weather.
Why, I've seen horses stuck fast in the
street; every hoof frozen to the ground,
and they just had to Jump in and thaw
them out before any travel could be done
except on foot. I've seen the breath
just frozen up solid right out from a
fellows mouth, and it was nothing for
boiling water to freeze inside of two
minutes. That's what I call weather
what is weather."
elbow can all this interest me?" asked
the editor. ''Do you take this for the
Signal Service office?''
mo-" said the battered party, "you
must not complain of this sort of wealth
Alaska. Ever in Alaskan
''No,' said the editor, 'andI don't see
how it can interest you to know where
/ have or have not been.''
"You should take little trip through
Alaska" said the battered visitor
''Great country. Lots of things in that
country you never dreamed of, and cold!
well, the weather down there would turn
red hot bar of iron ice cold inside Of
three minutes. Tell you it takes tough
man to live in that country.'
"Don't you think you have bored mo
long enoug h?" asked the editor, lean
ing back in his chair and glazing at the
tramp.
'Now Alaska is part of our coun-
try we should take more interest in,"
said the tramp, setting lower in his chair
and acting as though he had come to,
stay. ''You wouldn't think it, but this
country is just immense now thatAlaska
is added to the rest of our territory.
Why, you draw line somewhere about
San Francisco and you cut the country
square in half. Think for moment
hot hot To IN,
elbow long do you propose to keep
this very senseless conversation up?"
asked the editor, bringing his hand
down with bang upon his desk. ''Do
you suppose receive a salary for listen
ing to every"
''Think of our wealth, said the tramp.
"Why, sir, we are the richest nation on
the globe to-day. Almost twice as rich
as Russia, and we can 90 billion or so
ahead of England herself There is
something for a true American to be
growing over. Ever been west? You
can never properly appreciate this glori-
Gus country until you take atrip through
the western states. What do you think
of travelling whole day through a
single field of grain? That is the back
bone of our nation, sir-gain. Now I
have an idea that you do not properly
appreciate the land you live in. You do
not appear to be interested in my con-
versation. Your eyes have an absent
look about
'I'll give you just two minutes to get
out of this building" shouted the editor
jumping to his feet.
''Then there are the territories,a said
the tramp, diving into his pocket and
pulling out a stump Of a cigar, which
he proceeded to light. s'There is Wash
ington Territory for instance. Takes
you thirty days to get there from here,
going by steam to"
"You have two minutes left" cried
the editor, picking up a heavy paper
weight.
''That territory is just the best in all
the land. Right on the Pacific Coast, and
a climate like Florida, only more to be
depended upon for good, steady weather
all the year round. Lots of enterprise
rdown there, too. Think nothing of
raising up town of six or seven thous-
and souls. Speaking Of souls, there is
one thing l am sorry to see developing
in our land, and that is the tendency
to doubt religion. Now, don't believe
in crank preachers of the gospel, but
we do not want to let 60 our faith alto
gether. That is sure to lead to the French
Revolution sort of thing. That was
the turning point in the worlds history
though, that same revolution in France.
Do you think the present republic in
France will last? [ do not. I'll bet
you
zone minute" howled the editor,
jumping back and raising the paper
weight!
on bet you box of imported cigars
that the party favoring an empire will
be in power in France inside Of -" Whiz!
went the paper weight, but the tramp
lodged it cleverly, and smiled sadly as
he continued: .'In France inside of six
months. France is just ready to follow
a bold man whenever he comes to
Ever been to Franee9 Don't you inn
agine that Paris is France any more than
New York Is the" but here the patent
double baels Action, however, ce,uSht The
poor creature, and the editor was free.
---Brookly1 Eagle.