The Dawson journal., 1883-03-08
TRIALS AND TRIBULATION
OF A BRIDAL PAIR.
From Peck's Sun.


From Peck's Sun.
"Say, what kind of hotel dc
you keep?'' said green looking
man, as he stepped up to the coun-
ter and registered his name, and
added ''and WIFE after it. "Can
newly-married couple settle
down here for two or three DAYS
and have quiet visit with each
other, and not be scared out of
their boots?"
The hotel man said they could
go right to their room and stay
there three days or three weeks,
and never come to their meals il
they didn't want anything to eat.
"But what is the matter? Have
you been annoyed?" asked the
hotel man.
Annoyed That don't express
it. We were married day before
yesterday, at st. Paul, and went
to a hotel I live about sixty
miles west of st. Paul, and the
travelling men put up a Job to
make me tired. There were about
l00 of them showed in at st. Paul,
and I'll be darned if they didn't
keep us awake all night. They
knew we were bridal couple, and
they bribed the bell boys and por-
ters to let them act for them, and
when we rang the bell for bell
boy, drummer for Chicago
cigar factory came in and wanted
to know what was wanted. Tor
dered pitcher of ice water and a
Milwaukee drummer for a grocery
house brought it in, and he looked
at my wife, who is little bashful,
and made her feel real bad. |
didn't know they were drummers
until the next day, or l should
have killed some of them. | rang
the bell for some coal, and a trav-
cling man who posts railroad cards
around, and works up excursions,
came in and fixed up the fire, and
he stayed and poked it FOR half an
hour, and he had more gall than |
ever saw. He asked so many
questions about how long we had
been married, that [ wanted to
thunap hilna, but my v,iso said MA
didn't want to have no row the
first day we were married. | rang
for a chambeFmaid to clean up the
room and bring some towels and
it was about half an hour before
she came, and l went down to the
office to see about my trunks, and
the chambermaid stayed about
half an hour, and was very inter
esting, and my wife said she was
a real pleasant, affectionate sort of
a creature, far above her station,
and | tell you I was mad when ]
found out that it was a smooth
faced, handsome young Jewish
drummer for a Milwaukee cloth
ing house, who was in with the
gang, and he gave the chamber
maid SO to loan him an old dress
so he could play chambermaid.
When my wife told me that the
chambermaid patted her on the
cheek, and said she was the sweet
est bride that was ever in the ho-
tel, and asked for a kiss, and my
wife said she thought it would be
no harm to kiss a poor chamber
maid, and encourage her, 1 wanted
to kill him, and [ went down in
the Office in the morning, but the
smooth faced cuss had gone to
Fargo. 1t wass all the landlord
could do to hold me. Well, while
we were at supper somebody got
into room and put crocker crumbs
in our bed, and we fould a cool
oil-cloth floor mat over the top
sheet, enough to freeze anybody.
But the worst was at night. We
had just got comfortable in bed
when there was a knock at the
door, and [ got up, and the watch
man was there and said he wanted
to point out to me the fire escape,
so L could get out in cases of fire
and l went out in the hall, and he
took me way to the end Of the
building to show it to me, and
while / was looking out of the
window my wife came running
down tine nall and begging me to
save her. l asked her what was
the matter, and she said as soon