Connecticut western news., 1883-01-03
THE LIME.KILN CLUB.
Sage Advice by Brother Gardner-An Inc
 dOrsement by WalpOle-General Items.
From the Detroit Free Press

he arose and looked up and down the aisles.
 "Yes, sah."
 "Den he will please step to de front. :"
 Brother Johnson appeared to labor un- der the impression that medal was about to be presented him for having the longest heels of any colored man ill America, and his face wore broad grin as he stood at the desk.
 'sStepof Johnson, said Brother Gard ner in his most solemn tones, "I was in de back room of grocery on Beaubien street de odder night to bargain fur ten bushels of 'taters, an heard your voice as you cum in to order fo' pounds of buckwheat flour, an to remark dat your ole woman was ravin' crazy wid de toof- ache"
 "Yes, sah, dat was me"
 "De ole man Climax soon trapped in, an 1t wasn't five minutes befo' you had @ hot dispute bout de aige of de airth.''
 "He doan' know muffin, sah."
 "You called him fool"
 'An' he called me liar"
 "You said he was a bigot."
 "An he said was 8 humbug."
 'I heard it all, Brudder Johnson, an now want to talk to you little. In de fust place, what do you know bout de aige of de world ?''
 ''I-I-well, sah, what does de ole man Climax know bout it?"
 Oats it-what do either one of you know bout 1t? Nufin'-nufin' tall. Oats whar de trubble cums in. Two men will dispute harder ober what dey doan't know dan ober solemn facks. De worst enemy I eber had was man who got mad at me bekase wouldn't believe in ghosts.
 ''What we doan' know we often try to make up fur in argument. What we lack in argument we try to mak up fur in blab. It am easier to call man fool dan to produce lacks and figures to con- vince him dat he am in de wrong. It am safer to call an old man 8 liar dan tc wink at 8 young mans wife. Let me say to you:
 'What you believe in wid all ye1 heart may, arter all, be wrong.
 "De man who draps argument full epithet has no case.
 ''It am only de fairest-minded mer who admit deir ignorance of what dey doan' know.
 "Abuse may silence man, but ii won't convince him.
 ''It am only de bigot who brides him self on his cast-iron opinyuns.
 ''It am only de fool who believes as sershuns am true bekase he asserts 'em
 ''Now, Brudder Johnson, you draI back to yer bench an sot down an stay sot, an de nex' time you h'ar somebody boldly announce dat dis world am fifty millyon y'ars old you pick up your buck wheat flour an' walk home wid de re fieckshun dat it wouldn't establish de lacks in de case if you an him war tc gouge an bite an kick an claw till deil wasn't rod of sidewalk left in Gardner ville."
 Sir Isaac Walpole got all ready to pas' the bean box and then waited lone enough to observe that he perfectly agreed with the President. On one oc casion he himself had struck 8 man flo, contending that Adam was lame in th' left leg and that Eve wore eyeglasses and that the only fact established was the fact that he was fined $15 ant costs, and had to wear cotton stocking and straw hat all winter as 8 conse quence He then proceeded on his pil grimage and declared the following can didates elected:
 Whipcord Davis, Topsail Tyler, Colo nel Scott, Judge Pipin, Elder Snaff1es Warsaw Kenton. Thirty-six Brown, J Placque Jenkins and Elder Skinner Son.
 Brother January J. Jones, of Selma Ala., forwarded the following certail cure for chilblains, and asked that tn 1925 reward be sent him by express a once:
 My remedy is as follows, to wit: Upo 7 l. going to bed, take 8 red flannel petticoa l and wrap both feet with it; let the fee rest on the pillows and the head at tn foot of the bed. The elevation will caus a reverse circulation of the blood and tn medicinal properties of the red fianne will be absorbed into the pores of tn 5 skin. This will produce warmth of tn v feeling warranted to dispel the most con plicated case of chilblain l The Secretary was instructed to repl l to the sender that the club would giy t the remedy one more trial and write hil f the result.
 The Hon. Burdock Cantelope sent tn e following paragraph from 8 Canadia n newspaper to the Secretary's desk to t I read:
 1 "Mr. Ebenezer Hutton, the aged co # ored man of Hamilton, Ont, who in 6 recent lecture proclaimed that the sun c q move, was prostrated from overwork t.
 day while observing the transit of Venu
 He was taken to the City Hospital tn
 afternoon in a handsome sleigh, and e
 corted by several friends. While M e Hutton is recuperating he will not re from his astronomical labors, but wi
 prepare some further startling propos o tions in astronomy" l. When the reading had been finish' 10 the Hon. Cantelope inquired if MT. Hu u ton was 8 member of the Lime-Ki 10 Club.
 > He am not" replied the Presider