The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1883-08-17
PHUNNYGRAPHS.

Before you eFlticiSe a nesghb9T
for keeping dog, consider how
difficult II Is 10 lose Il dog when you
want to get rid OF him.
A man told his daughter il she
leanFed TO work he would surprise
her. She learned the art, sud he
surprised her by disehlrging the
hired girl.
When mau wanster prube
eberything what he SAYS, Fse sorter
s'pieious; but when he wahster bet
on eberylhing be says. kuows dat
he's q liar.
An exchange says Beecher Is
color blind and cannot tell red
stocking from a blue one. That
must be very sefiods afflicliou for
man in bis business.
"Mr. Isaac, can you tole me vere
vas the first diam0nds - "No,
Mr.. Yawcobs; we're vas itl' "yy,
Noah's sou in der ark; be yds u
Shem OF der fust water.n
From some great unknown:
"Yon never saw my hands as dirty
As yours" said mother to her lit
tie girl. mo, but yoar ina did,
WAS the prompt reply.
A New York man had his head
fractured by bath tub falling upon
him. This will teach him here
after not to tool around a contri-
vance that he ~ not familiar With.
"You'Ie getting quite bald, old
man; you try rum. r"Rum 40 Ilhave.
I've bought gallons of it," All,
see; but then, p'r'aps, you could
never get it higher than your
mouth y
"Where did you get your vol.
deriul power Of lauguager asked
an admiring auditor at the close of
u lecture, "Oh,n replied the
lecturer, with laugh, II used to
work in Il BARRIERS shop
Oscar Wilde recently said ia
speech 81 found my hishesI ideal
Of art in Colorado aud ex Scnlt0r
Tabor rises up, makes profound
DOW, remarsing 81 knew Osc
wouldn't forget my $3.50 night
Shirt
A colored girl in Atlanta was
knocked over by an engine, and III
a few minutes got up as II nothing
unusual nad happened, and, look-
ing after the engine, said: "You's
got heap ob politeness to arve
n lady dat way"
"Mam ma" said a little boy, III
gave Carrie Il pretty good hint to
go hone to-day" "What did you
do, my son p said his mother.
"Oh, | filled her mouth with
musiaId and called it apple sauce.
and she took the hint.7
~ served in the Tennessee legis-
lature," said a man to n new train
acquaintance. 81 served in the
Arkansaw legislature replied tho
acquaintance; and each aan arose
aud arranged pocket flask to-
keep the nccks from being OK
posed.
A dude meets dudine Oh the
street cars: She-"Why did you
not come up to ow house las night
we looked faw you.' He-"Yaas!
could not get up tbah.. Had 'other
Engagement. Me mouthah's dead.
Thought | ought to go up to ow
houthl'
A boy was making n great rack.
ct on his drum in front of house
in SOmerville. "Little boy,r said
a lady, "you must not drum here
there is a lady sick in this house."
"Well,' said the boy, III wish |
was a doctor. There's solnbody
sick in every house in town."
i Cetewayo is no more. The
report of bis death has been con.
tirmed. We didn't know much
about him of bis record, but his
name was good long one in print
b. and he seemed sort of familiar te
rs, Peace to his ashes.
Colored Doctor (wes.ded to no
school )-"I think | wouldn't agger-
vate myself, Mig .Jei'son. Idon't
thiuk Mr.. Jel'son crilterkul; ct dar's
no congestion Nv dc pyramids, an
reaction takes place in de spinal
collum, he will convalescent him
sell SOS to be about putty soon."'