Herald and tribune. [volume] (Jonesborough, Tenn.) 1869-current, 1883-11-01
HUGGING AS A FINE ART.
A Chicago Parents Sensible Advice
to a Blushing Lover,

Milwaukee Sun.
A queer case has just come to
light Ill Chicago. A young man
spent an evening with his girl and,
during the evening, while the fam
iIy was present in the paror he
was as demufe and bland and child
like as could be wished.
All night, after he had gone, the
girl complained of a pain in her side,
and in the morning a doctor was
called, and he found that two of
the girls ribs were broken. How it
was done nobody knew.
The father was away on a trip to
Wisconsin, and when be came home
the matter had to be explained to
him. He..was told that the ribs just
simply broke themselves, and that
neither the mother nor the young
man could account for it, and yet
all thee b.ushed ter ribly. The
father called the young man into
the library. The young man was
so weak be could hardly walk, and
when he sat down he took out IL
handkerchief and mopped his brow
and wished he was dead. The
father looked the young man oyer
and was sorry. He finally said:
Young man, | guess can give
you some points on hugglng. You
must first learn that a girl is not
constructed on the same principle as
ofan iron fence orsa truss bridge. A
glrl is a delicate piece of mechan-
ism, like fine watch, full Of little
springs, wheels, jewels, etc. The
breaking of any one OF these would
cause her to cease keeping time and
necessltate her being taken to a
jeweller for repairs. In hugging
girl you don't want to go at it as if
you were raking and binding, or
catching sturgeon. | know that
where the family sits up late with a
young couple and spolls several
precious hours of hugging, that un-
less the young man has a good
head when left alone with the OBJ
iect Of his affection, that he is liable
to oyerdo the matter and try to
make up for lost time. He seems
to want to hug up lot ahead, and
grabs the girl as though he wanted
to break her In two. This is wrong
You should go at it calmly and de-
liberately, even prayerfully, and be
as gentle as though she was an ivory
fan. The gentle pressure of the
hand that a girl loves, even the
touch, is as dear to her as though
you run her through stone-crush-
er. You should not grab hel as
you would bag Of oats. and leave
marks OH her that will last a life
time. A loving woman should not
be made to feel that her life is in
danger unless she wears a corset
made of boiler>iron. l hope this
will be lesson to you, and heres
after, if you caunot control your
feelings, l will provide a wooden
Indian for you to practice OH at first
until you haye developed your mus
cle and got tired, and then we can
turn our daughter loose in a room
with you, and not feel that it is
necessary to keep surgeon handy.
In allowing you to keep company
with my daughter, I do not agree
% provide you with a human gym
1asiumn, dressed in "a Mother Hub
oard wrapper and wearing bangs
You can readily see that a girl
would not last a season through If
he had to have ribs set once il week.
Please think this thing over, and if
he girl is well enough next Sun
lay you can drop in try some more
lbs. Now, you go home and hug a
lat>rack for an hour Or two, aud
lave it repaired in the morning.
The young man went out into the
hight air, took his hat off to cool his
lead an d hired man to kick him.