Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1883-04-14
BROTHER GARDENERS HOROSCOPE.

81 see by de papers, said Brother Gard.
ner, as he motioned to Samuel Shin to drop
one of the back windows-"I see by de
papers that Prof. Gillian predicts dat in
1888 de Guild man will be in de ascendan-
cy. Just so. Well drap two mo- winders
an discuss the subject little.
"In one hundred vars, den 'cordin' to
de Professor, de Samuel Shins an Givea-
dam Joneses an Pickles Smithses of our
race will be at de head of de Guv'ment.
Praps a pusson named Waydown Bebee
will be President of de United States.
Whalebone Ho%ker will be de leadin' Chief
Justice of the highest Court in de land.
Judge Cadaver will be de Gub'nor of Mich
igan. Chewso Chapman an Depravity
johnson will be de Vanderbilt an Gould of
de period Professors Breakdown Turner
an Rise Up Bunker will flourish at Hazard
an Yale Three-Ply Jones, Discount White,
Bunko jackson, an oders will be Presidents
of National Banks, an Boards of Trade,
Chambers of Commerce, an Stock Elk.
changes will be run entirely by de Guild
men.
ct am a beautiful landscape to look
upon, an really pity de poo white man.
He has bin lordin' ita,asfade world at large
so long, an has maMv7R progress in sci.
ence an ferlosophT 2x2E will seem purity
tough for him to sSEsir wood, clean our
alleys an black our butes.
At this point Reconstructed Taylor be-
gan to stamp his feet and clap his hands
and seek to start an encore, but the Presi-
dent interrupted him with
"Brudder Taylor, drsp it Now draw
yer feet out of de alley an doan' move agin
till de meetin' am out d! No doubt you am
tickled half to death, but let as see what
tIckles you. In hundred vars we are to
be top of de heap. We am to lose our
kinks and grow straight ha'r, our feet am
to be pared down, our noses am to be
trimmed down, an our mouths puckered
on a new plan, an we am to lose our bru-
nette compilations. Den our heads am to
be reshaped an Resulted, our speech filed
down an sandpapered, an we am to pro-
gress faster in one hundred Vars dan de
white man has in one thousand. l think |
see us at de pinnacle We look awful
purity at de top of de heap Nobody would
know US as we stan erect on de cap-sheaf
an wave de glorious banner.
my fren's," continued the President,
after long and solemn silence, "if Prof.
Gillian am not fool, he am de mex bes'
thing-a crank. One hundred vars will
not do what he says. We can't fetch it.
We was bon in de wrong time of de moon,
brought up on de wrong sort O. eatables,
an dedicated in de wrong kind of skules.
We have an shall progress. Our chill'en
will know mo- dan we do, an DER chill'en
will be peg higher, an de day will come
when we shall stan higher in all de arts an
sciences but we mus not forgit de pres
ent. Oar am mouths to feed an bodies to
clothe an house rent to pay an fuel to buy,
an he who loses days work to dream
ober Professor Gilliams prophecy shows
his lack of sense. If, arter all de present
| members of dis club have been sleepin' for
half century in de grave. de white man
begins to lose his grip an de black man be.
gins to cotch on, it will be all right. Mean
while, doan' miss a cog. Doan' be made
fools of. Doan' try to clothe de chil'en
wild de raiment of hundred vars hence,
an doan' expeck dat de predickshum dat
we shall ultimately warm our feet in de
nails of Congress am gwine to satisfy pres
ent hunger. We will now tighten our belts
an pitch into de reglar order of bizness."
detroit Free Press.