Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1883-03-23
QJITS.
An EngIish Commercial Traveller
Tale.

49, "s 'N" N""WNiNA"A AEaNeleEa
Tale.
There Happened to be a snug party of COM
me'c al gentlemen assembled in the CONNER
cial room Of an iun in one of our quaint
South country towns, one winter evening,
few years ago. The cloth lad been removed
from the table, the customary toasts had been
duly houored, and the company, some half
dozen in number, had drawn their chairs
round the fire, lit their pipes, and each with
his glass of grog at his elbow had evidently
made up his mind to be as comfortable and
as cosy as possible.
The conversation was being monopolizod
by Mr.. Hicks vulgar, puffy faced bald
headed man, with large eXpanse Of shirt
front and much ostentatious jewelry, who
was standing with his back to the fire, his
hands tucked under his coat-tas in the or.
thodox British fashion. The other men, who
were all younger, were listening with the re.
spect due to Il representative Of the old
school of commercials, hazarding occasion
ally an approving remark, dutifully laughing
at every joke, but in no way interfering with
tho great mans periods
An" he said, wrinkling his fat brow
into a series of parallel creases, and gazing
almost mournfuly up at the ceiling; "trav-
cling amt what it was. There amt no fun
nowadays. You young gents don't know
what it means, for railroads have knocked it
all on the cad. 1t was something, / can tell
you, to turn out of a warm bed at four O'Clock
of a winters morning, and jump into the
trap for twenty-mile round before breakfast
so that the hopposition shouldn't get the start
of you. Nowadays, you jump into your
train with your husters and your wraps and
your mornin' paper, and you take your time
over matters as comfortable as can be. You
don't seem to have the spirit we had, though
we worked and we had our fun, too, can
tell you. You work but you don't seem to
have no time for fun"
" In what way do you mean, sir 7" asked
the boldest of the audience.
What way?" repeated the great man.
"Why, mean the lodges and larks We was
up to-"
What sort of lodges and larks?" asked
the other
90 Oh, ell sorts " replied the old gentle
man. " There's so much humbuggin' eti-
quette about nowadays It's what you call
bad form for gent to play trick upon an
other. I've known all sorts o. things done.
| They used to hocus one another's drink, SO
as to make the hopposition sleep 'eavy the
next morning lock their doors on the out
side; change their boots tell the boots not
| to wake 'em until it was too late TO do any
| thing and as We used to ave rather wet
nights in those days, l can tell you some of
us required power o. sleep TO shake off the
effects. 1t was considered fair and above
board to steal march in any way upon a
| gent who was working in the same line and
there was much more hopposition then, al
though there may be more competition now (;
because, you see, such lots done by post and
wire in these days. Why, look at me l
aven't been here for two years or more but
l know that when go round tomorrow to
see how the other travellers been gettin' on,
shall get just as many orders as if I'd been
regular all that time Not that all of my GUS
toners will know me but they know the
name of the frm-Hooker q Smoker, of
Dowgate 'ill-Rll that's quite enough for
| EN-"
And were you ever tricked in any of the
ways you describe?" asked another young
| commercial.
Me me tricked2 Not me. Joseph 'ickt
was always too wide awake. No | was
never caught" replied the great man. 81
once caught fellow in the hact of taking
the linch-pins out of my gig but l sooI
stopped his game, can tell you. That wal
at Charing-not Charing in London, bu
OhRring between Canterbury and Maidstone.