The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-07-27


Tho great Northwest Il entered
through the gateway of St. Paul. There
the traveller first hears of Boomtown,
the Portals of the Sunset" the "Fa-
vorite of Fortune" the ssGem of the
Great Golden Northwest the Love
hest Spot in the Land of Light" the
"Plucky Pioneers Paradise upon the
Productive Prairies." Not only are the
allurements and advantages Of Boom
town advertised in alliteratiye prose,
but the real-estate man also drops into
poetry, and relates how the place has
grown:
Prom village in a vale
10 city strong and hale,
kre three harvests tell their tale"
In prospectus this city is the focus OF
all railroads that are ever to be built.
the future capital of the future State,
the garden spot of the farmer, the sani-
tarium of the invalid, the speculator's
paradise, the land of golden grain,
where the wheat grows in forests and
the oats in impenetrable jungies.
Should our arrival in st. Paul be OBJ
perfume we learn that an auction sale
OF Boomtown lots is one Of the enter
tainments of the. evening. and we are
sadly lacking in the tourists proverbial
enterprise If, we do not attend. Bands
of music, inviting us to the scene, play
lively tunes, calculated to intoxieate
the buyer and loosen the strings of his
purse. Like the spies sent ont BY Moses
to report upon the land of Canaan, and
who returned bearing between them that
famous bunch of grapes from the brook
Eshcol, the Boomtown syndicate have
also brought with them the products Of
their land and challenge Canaan itself
10 show an equal display of No hard
wheat, tastefully arranged in sheaf and
Jar; enormous potatoes, each one din,
ner in itself; and luscious fruit, which,
however, owing to the undeveloped
state of the country, is yet in state Of
papier mache.
The sales are made by that most To-
quacious of auetioneers, the marquis OF
Mud" who has fairly earned his honor.
able title. He exhorts the people tc
catch on to the Boomtown boom, which
has surely set in to stay. Then, with
the sensitiveness of the true boomer, he
corrects himself, and says that this is
not boom at all, but healthy and
regular growth. The people catch on.
In the fever of the moment, those buy
lots who never bought before. Some
buy In confidence, and some in fun.
Some think that kind of lottery as
good as any other, and some invest fol
The privilege which it gives them of oc-
casionally putting on the air of CAPT.
salist, and referring, in careless tones,
10 their real estate up in Boomtown.
They buy for that satisfaction which the
mere possession of property gives.
Where lives the man who has MI
bought dog or dressing gown, an
opera-house or newspaper, for SINH
lar reasons?
Having purchased his lot, the traveller
feels a natural desire to look at it, and
proudly stand upon the base of his pyra-
mid of dirt, whose apex is at the center
Of the earth, three or four thousand
miles away. Since Boomtown is an
inland city. and the climate, he has
been led to believe, is just wet enough
for the farmer and just dry enough for
the consumptive, he is greatly shocked
to find that mis- destination is surrounded
by waste of waters. Only the re.
peated assurance that this is an excep-
tionally moist spring restores confidence
to his soul. The steamboat upon which
he has crossed the prairie unloads its
passengers at the veranda of the second
story of the hotel; and when, on the
following day. the investor starts out liz
row-boat to hunt up his real estate.
he finds that he had unwittingly sailed
across it as he came into town. The
exact location of his lot, however. can.
not be determined without diving bell
The corner-stakes, which were only
waist-high, are under water, and he
hears the surveyor, who is his pilot on
this occasion, mutter to his assistant
that it will be necessary to make his
pegs as high as lamp-posts hereafter
Frank ID. 7. Carpenter, IN -Atant3
Monthly.