The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1883-09-14
Mr.. Jones Buys a Book.

From the DetraIt Posr and Tribune.
Mr. Jones brought home a book with
him the other night and left it lying on
the rack in the hall, when he went into
supper, and he didn'tmake any remarks
about it either. Fact was, he hoped to
smussle it into the library and lose it
among the other books without Mrs.
Jones noticing it. Pretty soon, however
Mrs. j. began to wrinkle her nose and
sniff the air.
"Where have you been, Jeptlia?"
she asked suddenly. 81 smell Frangl-
pani."
"You don't smell it about me-" said
Jones, indiiierently, while his heart gave
a treat thump.
81 certainly do" retorted his wife. 81
noticed it as soon as you came in. It's
either Frangipani or Jockey Club; but
/ think it's mixed"
"a good deal Mixed" said Jones';
''you smell a fine Henry Clay I've been
smoking. Come TO think Of it, they per-
fume those cigars-that's it."
Mrs. Jones said nothing, but she kept
up a great thinking. Jones was congrat-
nlating himself on having escaped 30
easily, when Willie came in to supper
and began:
"Say, pa, what have you got in that
paper on The hat-rack? 1t smells awful
good"
"Eat your supper, sir" said Mr.. Jones
in a s~pare-an-father tone, "and don't
be SO curious. Curiosity wa what
got the whole world into trouble and
made us all sinners'-with a slanting
glance at Mrs. j., who was counting
the gro ,nds in the bottom of her tea
cup:
"What is it, Jeptha?" she asked limo
Gently, as it was the last thing she cared
to know.
"It'sa book" said Mr.. Jones care
lessly. 81 bought it OF a poor fellow
who said his family was sick, and he
hadn't ha9,a enorgh money to get home; Its
False Etiquette, or Grace of Deport-
ment. You don't nee d such a work,
dear, but you know sometimes l am a
little awkward. ha-ha."
WAS the ageut a young mani" asked
Mrs. Jones, pleasantly.
Yes, that is, / really did not OBJ
serve. The fellow said he was in dis
tress and | gave heer-1 mean | bought
the book of him just on purpose to en-.
courage her" said her husband.
"Very kind, Pm sure mumbled Mrs.
Jones. GLOW was the agent dressed?o
"You don't suppose l noticed his
clothes, Maria-why she dressed the
way all book agents d~Iess-black silk
%polonaise, and a hat and feather-I
mean hat and ulster-how can | tell?"
"You don't seem 10 be able to; and
she was in distress-and wore a black
silk polonoise, and used Frangipani,
Lubin's best. | cannot afford to, but
then I'm only your wife. Jeptha Jones'
you're a wretch! a monster! a hcaltless,
u%nprincipied man! Let me get my
hands on that book III snow you grace
of department. You know we didn't
want that book any more than d cat
wants two tails! Oh! oh! Oil"
This is why a wild-eyed man with a
book under his arm and leaving on the
disturbed air u long wake of Frangipani,
was seen rushing in the direction Of an
old-book store on Woodward avenue,
and overheard telling the dealer he had
bought the thing in a fit of philan-
thropy and wanted to get rid of it in a
fit Of despair. When the bookseller
put on his glasses and began to dicker,
the unfortunate man told him TO keep
it, he had no use for it; as he took pri-
waite lessons in department the book
wasn't worth = cent to him.