The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-08-18

II me for Eve minutes shall try to exl lain
the matter clearly" lie then commenced,
aud showed according to the latest investi-
CATION, that just as MONKEYS began to
find how much more useful WORT c, uld DO
performed with their I, re legs than with
their tails, the latter gradually fsll into dis
use, the lurmer RAPIDLY became more flrx-
ible aud by persistent usage through
cycles centuries, under every variety Of
Conditions, assumed the almost perfect form
oil the human hand.
"But," said Florry, CHATS only the
monkey. What became Of his tail9"
81 will tell you darling" replied John,
whose teaching was being swallowed by the
eye glass men. "When monkeys dropped
their tails as useless the animals themselves
went on pr rogressiug until they became men,
real, live men, "heirs of all the ages, in the
foremost files Of time" But the impetus Or
force which caused them to progress, CON
tinued 10 remain-oi course IN very weak
form with the poor useless tails that they
had abandoned II you have ever bad the
misfortune TO see chicken kiiled, or n
slike cut IN two, or u railway engine =
coupled from the moving ears you will
have noticed that the different parts con-
trve TO move with quite dillerent degrees
of speed. 81 it wts with the "talis" IN
which you are So profoundly interested.
They also continued to progress IN the di-
recIon ni the more important monkeys cut
you can perceive the monkey after milli' ms
Of yeats grew into man; the tail Gr, W
| iuto heuake believe at man. IL IS fit
sImetlmes for BARRIERS block, model tO
| b on jackets in mil ihel's shop, or ripens
ilto Ihe snuif tatug Sc"tchnan IN fr"ut oi
I ~ cigar store. 1t has become so numerous
now tndt thrlr is no work Tor it to do, and
! can only hop around like the English spar
row, making peculiar poises which no man
cuu understand, 1t must die"
but John, darling, where is this strange
creature to be soen. | have never seen it.
o, now dearly snoud love to see an ami,
NAL that had come down-or up--all the
way from monkeys tail alter being srpar-
ated ON the main bndy',
you need not go far, my dearest; there
are two pieces of ~ together now glaring at
you through the bars of the cage. You see
the idl"tic stare, the gi5bersh Of Language,
the fiat -bottomed hats, the iron bound
tightness of the trousers"
! "But John, dear, those are only Dudes.
They are harmless. You don't mean to say
that they are all to be killed like the srar-
rows"
"Yes, my dear, they 'nust CO. as You say
The monkeys hOye protested against THEN
being allowed to disgrace the family. They
belong to no species, no race, no nation, ne
tribe, no family. They haye II" duties, NJ
rights, and no capacity fer growing any. il
is true they have their mustaches and gold
headed canes, and when these things come
In contact with Bang" "Grecian Bends anc
similar munstrosities they seem to frater'
nize: but both classes must g.. They are
only the Tall enus OI human UelDbs, Az
have proved. have opened several of thei
bodies in the dissecting room;they are made
of saw dust, covered with kid gloves auC
armed with a ca Ie. That is ALL"
30, John, that is very funny. Would i
be any harm. to stick pin IN one of then
over there, aud see the saw dust flow out"
alt would be no harm, my dear, but Sc,
they ure moving away"
"And where do they 60 Jnhn?"
"Dont know. my dear; give it up; per
haps To see their friends with the Bangs"
"Well, NY dear good john" suid Fioiry
as she put her little hand through Join
stout arm on the way home to supper, "ii
hard enough To be man or woman aud
have come all the way from m 'nkeys,Lu
is most aw[ully awful 10 be Dude and t
have growed out Of monkeys tall"
FALKLAND.