National Republican., 1883-03-06
MODERN MASHERISM.
The Classical Gay Cavalier Contrasted with His
Modern Prototype,
How Greatly the Class Has Deteriorated
in Two Hundred Years,
A Critical Chemical Analysis Of the Heart Smashing
Adonis
And n Careful Classification and Dcscrip-
tion OF Several Of Him.

Mashcrisln like almost everything else, has
sadly deter, rltcd in tho last 200 years.
There has been an alleged renaissance in art,
but in the domain of subtle mashcrism new
idols have superseded the respectable old cfi-
gics, and dcpraycd state of affairs is the re-
suit. In biblical times the mnshcr married,
or, to speak more politely, took unto himself
the mashed. This was the case from an early
day down to the time of Solomon in all his
glory,
A patriarch with n caravan and genial
way of gazing at giddy young girls could be
Brigham Young in n week. All that was
needed then to secure a young lady was q
couple of Camcls and any amount of parallels.
But after the Christian era set i'll the custom
OF plural mushcs and ensuing marriages
dropped out of everyday life, and the rcqui-
Eitc accomplishments for fascinating the fem
ininc heart became different. From caravans
and parallels It was necessary for n swain to
he replcto with prowCss and an ability to
write odcs TO delicate eyebrows. The mcdiw-
val mashcr went forth to annihilatc the Turk
with his lady's scarf and firm belief in mus
cular Christianity rs fetichcs.
IIc returned covered with scars and suffer-
ing from the msiortunes of battle, but he for
got his woes when lingering beneath n irCtted
window whispering sweet nothings to maid
of honor in nightgown The medieval
maiden, raised in II martial atmosphere,
deemed sears embellishments of love rather
than hateful blcmishos, and consequently the
cavalier who had received the most carving
gained the greatest amount of adulation.
This was glorious state of affairs, and
n reference TO Mr.. A. Tonuysons "ldyls of
the King will give an insight to them
moro fully than journalistic scrccd.
Since that halcyOn time, however,
all is changed The masher has forsaken the
crusaders for sociables and excursions. Tho
helmet has given way to the No. derby.
The struggling locks which served as play
things are now carefully plastcrCd down upon
inch and half forcheads. The hands which
Eraspcd the spear and battle AK never clasp Il
dcadlcr weapon than dear little cane or
an inspiring iulcp straw-and in word
Apollo has usurpcd Mars in mashCrdom.
Women, too, have changed, of course. There
was no fear, neither were there bangs, in the
oldcn time.
Now a mouse spreads dismay where once an
invading army would have caused no
banchcd faces or trembling forms, and the
girish forehead is concealed by hirsuto
fringe that gives an air of dont-carc-a-
damativencss TO the modern belle that
catches the modern mashers, so to speak.
The girls of to-day banker after matinee
tickets and ice cream considerably moro than
they do after Odcs to their eyebrows In
person than poet to discover where the eye
brows end and the bangs begin. The girls
don't care for sears either; n man with u
serratcd nose or II vviscctcd jaw stands no
more chance with the average girl to-day
than u circus poster docs with II Wilhelmj
goat
The class in America known and derided
rs the mnshcrs par excellence are those
trouscrcd idiots who believe themselves ire
sistibc and spend their entire time ogling
women without regard, to race, color, or
previous condition of scrvitudc. They do not
have an especial tenderness forany particular
female but desire to get kindly beams from
all, and the more conqucsts they make the
happier they are. There is no place so well
adapted Is Washington to n study of mashers
and Tor the past month THE REPUBLICAN
man has been examining them with view to
description and classification. From numcr-
Gus specimens put under the spoctroscopc of
observation he finds that their chemical con-
pig .,,.in al, al