davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
A Perfect Remedy in 90 Diseases.

AsufikLDI MASS.
am verging on eighty years, aud deem
it my duty to suffering humanity tossy
that my long life is due to Ba .EDaKTK's
PILLS which have been my solo medicine
fur half a centure. know the last bny.
three years Of my life is owing solely %
their use. Your Pulls saved me rnnny
times after the best medical skill in seysr-
al States had given me up as hopeless. I
have had many converts " purgation with
BRASDRErH's FILLS, aud have seen them
perform almost miracles Of euro. For
children, few doses have cured measles,
scarlet fever, aud whooping cough. lu
all female troubles and weakness / have
meyer known Iheln 10 fail In adult males
| have known them To cure the worst cases
of dyspepsia, rheumatism, kidney diseases,
dysenlery AMI diarrbea; eEen dropsy,
paralysis. and hpoplexy have Yielded . a
persistent course Of BRANDRErHs Puts. In
fact have found them the true Life Elixir.
They act as continual prsveniiyes asainsi
the effects Of time, disease. aud Iab6t'+
JOHN H. MANR.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
If not paid in advance, $1.25.
ing terribly as he smoked his pipe.

grumuling terribly AS he smoked his pipe,
when in came the dark-eyed stranger.
II came to mako my peace with you, y
he said, mou.nfully, II am going
away"
Take seat sir" said the professor,
growing civil at once.
Lam going" he repeated, seating him
self close to the old man, "for two
reasons. TIE first is, that 1 love your
daughter Martha, and am sure YOU won't
let me have her; but The principal is
H,rr WorstaHsdrum.
Herr Worstanndrum!' repeated the
old man, opening his eyes very wide.
"Yes, am tormented by the recollec-
ton of your superior excellence. My
style of playing pleases; it is popul,r
Why7 Because the vulgar can under.
stand and appreciate it just as the
children like the primer better than
Cicero's orations. Yours is the true
school the only fountain of all excel.
lence. Bat it is only great minds Ike
yours that can comprehend the mean
ing of such wondrous melodies like
those of Herr Worstanadrum; but to
them-nhl that is reserved for you.
have tried it and failed"
"Reallyr' interrupted the old man,
hugely delighted.
"Yes, really. am continually trying
to recall it, but in vain. 1t haunts me;
it crazes me; and since cannot bear the
torture, 1 fv-"
But the professor was already at the
long-closed piano.
"You shall not go away, my poor boy
will play it for YOU every day, aud
perhaps you might learn it by degrees
1t is not your fault, you know, if you
did fail"
Impossible" returned the young
man, sadly. You are only too good;
,ut cannot stay"
mot ii give you Martha2" urged the
old man-as eager to keep him as he had
ever been TO drive him away.
That might alter the case" he said.
hesitntingly. But would you play the
adagio every da.P"
II will if you like" And be did.
Aud the young professor, with bis arm
around tho waist of his blue-eyed wife,
smiles as the old man crashes away al
Herr Worstanadrum," saying pityingly
poor fellow be can never play it,"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
SCROFULA

and all scrofulous diseases, Sores, Erysipc-
las, Eczema, Blotches, Ringworin, Tu-
mors, Carbuncles, Boils, and Eruptions,
of the Skin, are the direct result of an
impure state of the blood.
10 cure these diseases the blood must be
purified, ana restored to healthy and ma
tural condition. Ayers SAnsArATiELAhas
for over forty years been recognized by emi-
nont medical authorities as the most pow
erful blood purifier in existence. 1t frees
the system from all foul humors, enrchos
and strengthens the blood, removes all traces
of mercurial treatment, and proves itself
complete master of all scrofulous diseases,
a Recent Cure of Scrorulous Sores.
"Some months ago / was troubled with
scrotulous sores ulcers on my legs. lhe
limbs were badly swollen and innamed, and
the sores discharged large quantities OF
offensive matter. Every remedy ! tried
failed, until ] used ATEE's SAEsAPARiLLA,
Of which | have now taken three bottles,
with the result that the sores arc healed,
and my general health greatly improved.
feel very grateful for the good your
medicine has done me.
Yours respectfully, MRs ANN O'BRIAN."
lis Sullivan ST., New York, June -, 1852.
rEF' All persons Interested are invited
to call on Mrs. O'Bi1an; also upon the
Rev. Il. y. Wilds of IS East 54th Street,
New York City, who will take pleasure
in tcstifying to the wonderful efficacy of
Ayers Sarsaparilla, not only in the cure
of this lady, but in his own case and
many others within his knowledge.
The well-known icriie, on tie Boston Herald,
b. w. BALL, of Rochester, Nh, writes, June
I, 1882: ....- So
"Having suffered severely for some years
with Eczema, and having failed to find relief
from other remedies, have made use, during
the past three months, of AYERS SARsAPA-
EiIiA. which has effected n coWpiete cure.
! consider it magnificent remedy for all
blood uiseusCs" .......-' :, a. Sc. :
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

The young Marquis Of. Couynghsm, /,
who is one of the greatest landowners in
Ireland, received a rapturous reception on
bringing his bride to slane Castle, bis prince
ly home in Meath, last month. IIis wife 10
an Irish woman.
Mr. Mink testified, in Racine court,
that he regarded Miss Albrecht as slightly
bad tempered. She Immediately cried out
that he was liar, and therw herself upon
him, pulling his whiskers and scratching
his face. The verdict Of the jury was in
harmony with Mr.. Mink's opinion
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
MAY MIRTa.

Elbow grease is one of the essential
oils of industry.
General Sherman has TO sign himself
'your obedient servant" to a second
lieutenant.
"A Philadelphia dealer adyertises n
perfectly waterproof paint 1t ought TO
be just the thing for ladies' faces during
hot weather.
An Ohio man has taken the small
pox from u pet pig. When once the
disease gets into II family it is pretty
sure to go through it.
Statistics show that the largest num-
Der of marriages ars by persons under
twonty-three years of age. Does this
prove that as people grow older they be-
come wiser.
The resolutions passed by the New
York Legislature on the death Of Peter
Cooper open as follows: "Wbereas, 1t
has pleased Almighty God at the age Of
Einety-three."
1t doesn't take Ncrthern invalid
very long to get well in Florida. When
the FIRST weeks hotel bill is presented,
he generally says: Il guess I'm well
enough to start for home this afternoon.
A little lour-year-old girl did
not obey when her mother first called
| her So her mother spoke rather sharp
ly. Then sue came in and said
Mamma, I've been very kind to you to-
day ,ant don't want you to speak sc
large to me-"
A Sunday school teacher, after read
ing to her class the story of generous
child. asked them what generosity was
One little fellow shook his hand vigor
ously, and on being requested to answer
said, Its giving TO others what yo'
don want yourself"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

George ~. labored under hallucinas
tion that he had participated in the hattie
of Waterloo, and, to do him justice, IL was
not his fault if he did not. Again and
again he implOrcd "Farmer George" To al
low him to so into active service, but in
vain. Subsequently when he came to the
throne he more than once exhibited symp-
toms of desiring to take the office Of COM
mander in Chief which excited great con-
sternalion at the Horse Guards.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
He had Two Balls in III, stom.oh

lie put them there because il was the
fashion at his boarding house. They were
Goldfish balls. But the Soarders found that
putting too many Goldfish balls In their
stomachs produced dyspepsia, especially
when washed down with salt maokerel and
steak. Had they not found that PERRr
DAvIs's PAIN KILLER cured dyspepsia their
boarding heuse fare would have killed
them.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
LULU TAXES oARE or KITTY.
They brushed the clothes, they beat the
clothes

They brushed the clothes, they beat th
clothes
One sunny April day
Their winter clothes, mean, and then
SThey packed them all away
lp paper boxes, tied around
With very strongest strings.
First freely sprinkling them with some
Tobacco dust and campher gum,
Aud other sneezy things.
And when, their labor done, they took
Their tea and tonsted bread,
fWhy, where is Kitty2" some one asked,
q Aud "I know" Lulu said,
"She's in my dollie's biggest trunk.
10 brushed aud beated her,
Ihere can't not any moths, dess,
Det into her nice fur,
She scratched my finders when put
The camphor stuff about.
Divine seine toast that's buttered froo.
They left it all to her, and flew
To let poor Kitty out
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
Brandreth's Pills.

They are compounded OF Roots, Herbs
aud Gums of the most healing and bens.
fetal kind.
As Family Medicine they are unrivalled'
curing Headache, stipation, Liver com
plnint, Rheumatism, Dyspepsia-clearing
the blood Of all impurities-se -selleing on the
Liver, Kidneys and other important organs,
removing the waste tissue, and adding
years to the lives of all who use them.
For fifty years they have been used bV
the American public, aud their constantly
increasing sales show how they are sppreel.
ated,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
----A----=-=-s-
ook agent named Joe Smyrk,

"A book agent named Joe Sniyrk,
Was put out and hurt by jerk,
lie says as cure,
St. jacobs Oil is sure,
At all times 10 get in its work.
A lightning rod man in 81. Paul,
From house had serious fall,
Though battered and bruised,
II said, when be used
st. Jacobs Oil-"it simply beats ALL"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

"A London paper says that nobody ex.
cept an intimate friend knows where Mr..
Parnell liyes in London. When be leaves
the House of Commons he invariably drives
to Charing Cross, and on leaying the con-
veyance walks toward the Strand. Mr..
o'Kelley shares with Mr.. Parnell the secret
of his abode. They live together in the
same rooms. it is believed in one OF the side
streets off the Strand.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
t. Jacobs 0il-"it simply beats ALL"

During the year ssl there were 2,s6s
scholars taught in Dougherty county, Ga.
OF these ,676 were colored, and only 1913
were white. Twenty seven colored and Z
white teachers were employed. There are
about seven colored men to one white in
Dougherty county, and evidently in this
case at least the colored people cannot com.
plain Of ary partiality in the distribution Of
the school fund.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

The italian Duke of sulviati has issued
a public address TO all Italian Catholics.
urging them TO organize a pilgrimage 10
Rome for next autumn. The Duke says:
1--WE owe the Pope demonstration which
shall compensate him for SO much sufIerinr,
and prove to him that the true Italy is With
h,pn =
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
Railroad Guide.
Philadelphia & Reading R. R.
Arrangement Of Passenger Trains.
NOVEMBER, 18th, 1882.
Tra,ns taaya AIIantn,un 90 fol1oua.
VOL. XII, No 25.

Arrangement OF Passenger Trains.
NOVEMBER, 18th, 1882.
Trains leave Allentown as follows:
(Via PERKIoMEN RAILRoAD.)
For Philadelphia at $500, Gas, 1l.4o a. M,
and #3.l0 p. IN.
SUNDAYS.
For Philadelphia at $500 a. IN. and 1856 p. m.
(Via EAST PENN BRANcH.)
For Reading and Harrisburg, 90, $40 a.
m, l215, 49,, and 9.05 p. IN.
For Lancaster and Columbia, 600, $40 a.
m, and 81 N.
SUNDAYS.
For Harrisburg, and waypolnts, DOS p. m.
Trains for Allentown leave as follows;
(Vla PERKIoMEN RAILRoAD)
Leave Philadelphia, 7.4O n. m. and 100,
+l35, and 5.l5 y. M.
SUNDAYS.
Leave Philadelphia. $50 a. m, S.15, and
fl20 p. IN.
(via EAST PENN. BRANcH.)
Leave Reading, 7.ao, 1Ol5 a. M, 200. 3.b5,
Leave harrisburg, b2,, 75O, $50 a. M, Las
and 4.UU p. IN.
Leave Lancaster, t7.3O a. m, LOO and 1910
p M
Leave Columhin,7 u 80 a. m. i 10 and 34O pm.
trrom King Street Depot
SUNDAYS.
Leave Reading, 7 80 n. m.
Leave Harrisburg, 70 a. m.
Trains via "Perkiomen Railroad" marked
thus ~ run TO and IRON Depot. Ninth and
Green streets, Philadelphia, other trains to
and from Broad street Depot.
The $500 and 6.45 u. m. trains from Allen.
town, and the IS and Sis p. IN. train from
Philadelphia, via Perklomen Railroad, have
through cars to and from Philadelphia.
J. Il. WOUTTEN,
General Manager.
&c. HANCOCK,
tien'l Pn>s'r & Ticket Agent.
November 9th
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

No other preparation so concentrates
and combines blood purifying. vitalizinF /,
enrichiug ani invigorating qualities a.
Ayers sarsaparila. Quality should be
considered when making Comparisons.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
A Cal D..

To all who are suffering from the errors and
indIseretiOns youth. nervous weakness,
early decay loss Of manhood. sc ! will send
. reclne that will euro You, FREE OF
CHARGE. THIS great remedy was diseov-
cred by a missionary in south America. Send
. selfafdressed envelope TO the REV. JoSEfh
T. ISNAS. station u, New York city.
AGE. Il. ~.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

-Owenton. Ky.-Rev. J. N. Beck says:
81 have used Browns Iron Bitiers and con-
slider !: one of the best tonics sold"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

1s1-In the Diamond Dyes moro enlorinR
is given for o cts. Than any Is or rs cent
dyes, and they give faster and more brill
liant coors
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

JzS- The Most Reliable, Carefully
Prepared, and Best Purgatiye Of the
Present Age is
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12

nImpIImn ANDERSON SMITH.
fAIENIN Solicitors Of U. 5. and For
Street, cor Of q, opp. u S. Patent office,
Washington. u. G.. Correspondence solicit.
ed. No charge for advice. No fee charged
unless Parent Is allowed. References, Lewis
Johnson & Co., Bankers. and Postmaster
Washington, ID. q. Pamphlet Of lnstruc-
tions free. Jan 6-tfe
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
Advertising Rates.

We desire it to be distinctly understood
that no advertisements will be inserted in
the columns of THE CARBoN ADVOCATE that
may be received from unknown parties or
firms unless accompanied by the CASH
The following are our ONLY terms;
ONE SQUARE t1O LINEs),
ono ,..r oool ;rsartion. .......,,..... 10 cts.
Blk months. each insertion - cts
Three months, each insertion. ~ Gus
Loss than three months, first insertion
81; each subsequent insertion."'''' 70 cts'
Local notices 10 cents per line
NV. MORTIMER, Publisher.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-05-12
No Pate nt-NO Pay.
PATENTS

obtained for Inventors in the United States
Canada and Europe. at reduced rates. With
our principal Office located in Washington,
directly opposite the United States Patent
Ofice, we are able to attend to all patent
business with greater promptness and de-
spatch and at less cost than other patent at
torneys who are at distance from Wash
ington, and who have, therefore, to employ
"assuciate attorneys" We make preliminary
examinations and furnish opinions as to va
tentabllity, FREQ of charge, and a Il who are
interese cd in new inventions and patents are
invited to send for u copy OF our "Gude for
obtaining Patents," which is sent free to
any address, ana contains conf lete instruc-
tions how TO obtain patents and other. valua.
ble matter. We refer to the German-A Amer-
lean National Bank Washington, ID. g.. the
Royal Swedish, Norwegian and DaGish Lega-
tions. OF Washington Hon. Jos Casey, late
Ghiei q ustice u, =. Court OF Claims; to the
Officials OF the u. 5 Patent OIlce. and TO
Senators and Members OF Congress from
every State. =.
Address: LOUIS D'NTGER & co, So.
licitors of Patents and Attorneys Mt Law, Lee
Droit Building, WASHINGTON. ID. q.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16

looked after him for q moment and
the truth dawned upon me.
l rode rapidly to the house of my
friend. He was not at home. Then
l went to the store and found the fol.
lowing note pinned on the door:
The business season has opened,
and l am called away to see about the
opening trade. Hope you will deliver
the hides when / return, but, in the
meantime. you'd better take care of
your own hide. Your permit to sell
goods in the territory was bogus, and
the government officers are after you.
Yours, LONG HORN.
He was the rascal who had worked
the whole BUSINESS. and if ever I see
him again he'll think that trade has
opened up in a devilish lively man.
ner.-Arkansaw Traveller.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16
GOLDEN BALSAM."
This is the Famous Cough Rem
edy that Never Disappoints.

81 was troubled with severe Cough du.
ring January and February last winter it
being so violent that was compelled to
set up several nights in succession. My
lungs at the time were very sore. tried q
number of remedies without receiving any
benefit. A lady informed me that she had
found 'MARsH's GOLDEN BALsAM' a sure
cure when nothing else relieved her. I
sent for a bottle. and took two doses before
retiring. In the morning / awoke, after a
good nights rest, and went to work as we'll
as usual. and have enjoyed good health
ever since. / can cheerfully recommend it
in similar cases."1[A. NJ. Thistlewaite,
West Kansas City, No.
MARsH's GOLDEN BALsAM, the great
Lung medicine, and MARsH's GoLDAN
BLOOD AND LIVER Tonic are for sale
at Thos. j. Fletcher's Gem drug store,
Sedalia.
Large bottles SO cents and 81. Trial
size 10 cents.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16

merly stationed at Point Carbon and
Minersville, and is preacher of some
ability. He is q married man, and
left behind him q wife and six child.
rem. 1t is believed the guilty pair
have gone west, where Mrs. Price
made a number of acquaintance dur
ing her residence there with her hus-
band prior to her meeting with the
ministerial lovelace.
The west had better look out for
these yeople. No doubt Rev. w. II.
Movers will receive "calI" somewhere
in this broad land and undertakes to
preach the Gospel for-pay. Shall
such crime 20 UNPUBLISHED
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16
THE NAN SHE LOVED BEST.
Alleged Scandalous Conduct Of q
Methodist Clergyman.
Philadelphia Chronicle.

Philadelphia Chronicle.
For some time past the little village
of Branchdale. Schuylkill county, has
beea excited over the scandalous con-
duct of the Rev. ". II Meyers, a
minister of the 1ic,hodi>. denomina-
ton, WHO, though a married man,
showed q decidedly open affection for
Mrs. Ralph Price, a young woman
aged %, the mother Of two children,
and whose husband was in Chicago.
The scandal finally became 80 pro
nounced that the matter was brought
before a congregational meeting and
the attention of the presiding elder
called to the fact. Mrs. Prices rela-
tives also sent for her husband, and he
came east, and found work at his
trade. paper hanging, at Pottsville
The trouble seemed to have been
hushed up, and Prince and his wife
were again living happily together,
when she, with her husbands consent,
left town to visit her mother-in-law at
Minersville. Before leaving she took
her two children to the house of her
father, Aaron Moore, of Pottsville.
She stated that she would be gone but
q day or so. She has not been heard
from since. A note left behind by
her stetes that she had gone of with
the man she loved best. 1t has been
discovered that the preacher is also
missing, and it is now reported that
they met at the railroad station and
went away together. The elopement
has been kept quiet, but these meagre
details escaped yesterday, when Price
publicly announced that he would no
longer be responsible for debts con.
tracted by his wife. The families are
highly respected, and are plunged in
grief BY the waywardness Of the young
woman. Rev. Mr.. Meyers was for.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16

- Apply Dy the nugeI
into the nostrils. 1t will be absorbed, effectualy
cleansing the nasal passages OF catarrhal virus,
causing healthy secretions- II allays inflammation,
additional colds, completely heals the sores and
stores the sense of taste and smell. Beneficial re-
suits are realized by few applications.
A THOROUGH TREATMENT WILL CURH.
Unequaled for COLD I'm the HEAD, Head.
ache and Deafness, or any kin Of mucous
membranal irritations. Send for clfcula BY
mail prepaid, Soc q package-stamps received.
Sold by all Wholesale and retail druggists.
ELY BROTHERS, Owego, n. Y.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16
Health is WeaIth |

DIR e. G. WEsT's NERVE AND BRAIN TRkxb
nENT, q guaranteed specific for n terra, DE-.
Headache, Nervous Pr ostration caused by the Qoe
Of alcohol or tobar :. Wakefulness, Mental p.
preston. SofteninA the Brain resulting in -
Premature Old Age, Barrcnness, Loss Of pOWeE
in either sex. Involuntary Losses and Spermee
Orrhea caused by over-exertion of the brain, sefk
abuse or oyer-indulgence: Each box c01fam
for $500, sent by mail prepaid on receipt Of prize
WE GUARANTEE SIN BOXES
To cure any case. With each order received byA
for six boxes, accompanied with $780, We WI
send the purchaser our written guarantee 20 -
fund the money If the treatment does not e1feo
q cure. Guarantees issued only by
Fleischmann, Druggist ,Sedalia
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-16

RE A INV For Rough, Chapped and Greasy
OcAO Skin, black Heads, Pimples and
Skin Blemishes use CUrICURA SOAP.