The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1883-07-14
The Daily Bulletin.
THE SLIM TEACHER.
What Game ola Conspiracy to Break Up
School.

IL was given out in church Sunday
that school would open Monday morn
ing. After the evening service the BOYS
got together and talked it over, and de-
cided to give the new teacher Just q
week 1t had been thawing for day
or two, and the boys were tired Of skat-
Ing, so they thought they could afford to
spend week in educating themselves
In how to break up school. That
evening we were duly elected member
OF the class Of hard citizens, and we
were TO open the ball and do something
bad, get the teacher to lick u.s. and then
the boys were TO jump in and help.
Monday morning the school commend
ed, and the teacher proved to be a sick
Unlocking, slim sort Of fellow, u timid,
nervous man, with hand and face like
girl. Every time he looked at one OF
ttS boys there seemed to be an express
sion on his face as though he would say,
81 hope you will be good" WESp he
had anything to say to the soA4i&rs he
said please, and gave other evidsnces OF
being pretty soft,we all thought. That
morning the weather changed, and 1t
froZe hard, and at recess the boys got
together and said we would wind up
the school before noon andg out on the
ice.
1t was our turn to be bad, and it com.
menced right off The big boys had TO
carry in the wood and lay it quietly by
the stove. We took in an arinful AM
dropped it on the floor so that it shook
the building and loosencd the stovepipe.
The pipe came out of the chimney and
filled the room with smoke, but it was
put back, and the slim teacher only rep
rimanded us, and said that il must not
occur again. We just ached to 90 after
some more wood, but there was no op-
portunity. Pretty soon the teacher said
we might 60 and get pail Of water,
and while at the well we decided to
stumble on entering the school-room,
and spill the water all over the floor
and thus give the sickly-looking teach
er r chance 10 show what he was made
OF. The teacher was near the stove,
and we stumbled, and the water went
all over everything, wetting his boots
and making him pretty mad, In pick
ing him up we hadn't noticed that his
eyes were as black as Goals, and that he
seemed to be about eight feet high, but
as he looked at US we could see it plain
ly. He seemed 10 read our thoughts
and knew that il was done on purpose,
and we have always thought he heard
the boys talking ii over at recess Any
way, he jumped clear across the room,
grabbed us by the neck, and sat us
down In the water; then he lifted us up
and shook us SO our teeth ratified, then
be seemed to grab us all over and Just
maui us
We got chance once or twice to look
around TO the back seats. as he was re-
yolying Us around on our own axis, to
see if the other boys were coming TO help
us put him out doors but they were the
most studious lot Of boys we ever saw.
They had their heads down 10 their
books, and their lips were moving in 81
lent prayer. After the teacher had mop
ped the floor with us. he took usDy the
slack OF the pants, just as dog would
carry duck, and went TO his desk and
got biz hickory ruler, and proceeded
TO dry our pants. Well, ii was the mean
est way 10 dry pants that ever was, and
while it dried them well enough, it left
great ridges inside OF them that made
corrugated chair necessity, The BOYS
did fulfill hcirpart Of the programme
and when the teacher got through dry.
ing our pants and said, please return
to your seat, we felt as though his po-
likeness was perfect sham. We looked
at the boys rs we went 10 our seat, but
they never looked up. We have wit
messed contested seat, IN the Legislature
since, but never saw one that was rs ex-
citing rs that one in the old white school
house at the foot of the hill, The teach
er never spoke during the proceedings,
and when it Wa, over he looked even
paler and more -ickiytnan when he had
one hand in the iir that once grew
where We are .uE bald, Nrie the other
was at work in tI'a ari But none
Of the boys seemed TO care to pitch on
to a sick man, and he taught school two
terms and never had to whip another
boy That was the last school we ever
broke up. The slim, siekly teacher is
an old man now, living quietly in this
State with children as old as we are, and
we occasionally see him and ask him if
he remembers how we broke up the
school. He is feeble now, and walks
with cane, but if we had to have q
fight with him even now we would hire
man to doit.