Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1883-07-28

Here, condemn yOu, yoU will pay for
that ca:, said TIE gtOcsry uian 70 the
bad boy. Is lac cane ia tho store all broke
up the norgins after Tie Fourth of July.
'what cat:" said the bog, as he leaned
against the zinc ;cc-boX to cool his back,
which hsl been having tIOuble with
bunch of irc-crackcrs in his pistol pocket.
"Wc haven't ordered aHy cat fro;,. here.
Who ordered shy cat sent TO oar housel
No get our sausage at the market" and
the boy rubbed some ooid cream on his
nose and eyebrows, where tie ska was off.
''Yes, that is ali right enough, )" said the
grocery man, ''bu: somebody who knew
where that cat slept, im the box vi saw
dust back Of the store, filed It full of fire.
crackers wednesday torcI0on, when 1
was out to sec Tho procession, and uover
,iotiiicd the cat, a,d touched them of, and
the cat went thIegsh the roof Of the shed,
and she hGsp't xat hair enough left on her
60 put Ia tea. Now, you didn't show up
all the fOreneon, aud went and asked
your ma wRcCc You MAS, aLil sh0 said You
.hsd bcog scttiug up fnar nights with
sick hoy, and YOU slept all the forenoon
of ,titc Fourth. Own up, nov, w4s you
asteeSb or did you scorch my catf"
"Hcli," said the bsd boy, AZ he yawned
rs though he had been up all night, IL sni
iHRccent OF sitting up with your cat, but
plead guilty to sitting up with Duffy.
Hou see, Duffy thumped me once, when
We were playing nsrblcs, and said
would get even with him some time, His
ana washes Tor us, and when she told INC
shat her boy WIS sick with fever, and had
nobody to stay with him while she was
away, thought il woHld bo good way 70
get even with Duty when he WAS weak.
xnd ! went down there 10 his shanty and
gave liIr his medicine, and read To him
all day, aud no cried, cause he knew
ought 10 have mauled him, and that night
| sat up with him while his MA did the
ironing. and Duly WAS SO glad that
went down every day and STAYED there
every night, and fired medicine down him
until lie has got so he can eat beef tea AMI
crackers. My girl went back on me cause
si.c said | WAS sitting up with some other
girl, but pu!iy'e mother told her the truth
and was all right again. slept all the
forenoon the Fourth, and then took my
girl to the soldiers home. had rather
set up with Duffy, though"
80, get out. OIL can't make me boz
> u
and sut up with boz than 10 take girl
IL the Fourth of July" said the grocery
lnsn. - Gu didn't have any trouble with
the girl, did you:"
"So-nut with her" said the boy, as no
looked into the little round zinc mirrc. to
see if his eyebrows were bcginiiug I"
grow. 'RRt her pa Ia so unreasonable. /
think y IMAM ought TO know better than 10
kick a boy right where he has had pack
Of iirrcraCkrrs explode in his pocket.
NOu see, when ! brought the girl back
home she was a wreck. Don't you never
take girl 10 the Fourth of July, is the
idvic" OF Il hey who has had experience.
We hadn't amy more than got TO tho SOL
dicr'S hOE.c grounds before some boys who
were playing tag grabbed hold Of my
girls crushed strawberry polonaiSc and
ripped IL Of. That made her mad, and
sIu wanted me 10 take oifense at it, and
tried TO reason With the boys and they
both jumped on mo, and see the only
way 10 get out OF it hOnorably WAS TO ger
ont rca! spry, and l got out. Then We
sat down under 4 tToQ to eat lunch, and
my girl sWaii1vcd pickle the wrong
way, SnG pounded hor on the back, the
way Ina uoes me when I choke, and she
yelled, aud a policeman grabbed me and
shook inc, and asked me what | was hurt
~. that poor girl for, and told ne ii did
IL again he would arrest me. Everything
went wrong. After dark somebody fired
II Roman candle into my girls hat, and
Eet it on G:c, and [ grabbed the hat and
stamped OH it, and spoiled her hair that
her Ma bought her. By gosh, l thought
her hair was curly, but when the wig
was oil her own hair was straight rs
could DO. But she WAS purity, all the same.
We got under another tree to get away
from the smell OF burned hair, and = boy
set oil a ngScr CHASER, and il ran right at
my girls feet and burned her stockings,
and IL woman put the fire out for her,
while looked for the boy that fired the
niger chaser, bat didn't wan. 10 fluid
him. She was pretty near wreck by
that time, though she had all her dress lsf.
except the pol0nuiSc, and we went and sat
under y tree in quiet place, and l put
my arm around her and said never to mind
the accidents cause it would be dark when
we got home, and just then q spark drop
ped down through the tree: ~ fell in my
pistol pocket, right near to her, whore my
bunch or hrc-crackcrs WAS, and they be-
gan to go on. Well, never saw such a
sight as she WAS. Her dress was ono of
these mosquito bar, cheese cloth dresses,
and it burned just like punk. had pres
cnce OF mind enough 10 roll her on the
grass and put out the fire, but in doing
that neglected my OWN cOntlaSration,
and When got her put out my Coat tail
AMI trousers were 4 total loss. My, but
she looked like goose that has been pick
ed, and l looked like fireman that has
fell through ha;chway. by girl wanted
to go home, and took her home, and hor
pa Was setting OH the front steps, and he
wouldn't accept her looking that way.
He said he placed in my possession hole
girl, clothed ana in her right mind, and |
had brought back Il burnt offering. He
teaches i'll our Sunday school, and knows
how to talk piouS, but his boots are oiful
thick. tried 10 explain that | WAS not
responsible for the fireworks and that ho
could bring in Il bill against tho govern
mcnt, and | showed him how / WAS be-
rcavcd OF a coat tail and some pants, but
he wouldn't reason 1T all, and when his
foot hit Inc thought it WAS the resurrec-
ton, sure, and when | got over the fence,
and had picked myself up never stopped
till got to Duiiy's and set up with him.
cause thought her pa Was after me, ant
| thought no wouldn't enter Il sick room
and mxUl Il watcher at the bedside Of all
Invalid.
''liOw did your pa get black eye? |
heard that he did, said the grocery man,
giving tho boy a handful of unbaked peal
nuts to draw him out. "Didn'. get to
fighting, did her"
NO, pa doa't fight. II is wrong, he
says, to tight, unless you are sure yea can
whip The fellow, and pa always gets whip
ped, so he's quit fighting. You see one
of tile deacOns in our church lives out on
farm, and all his folks were going arAv
10 spend the Fourth, s0 he invited pa and
IDA ts come cut OIL the farm and have Il
nice, Quiet Time. and they went. Their