The daily gazette., 1883-06-12
noARpING HOUSE LIFE.
A La1dlady's Description Of the AIiseries
of Her Posltion.

philadelphia Press.l
The genteel boarding house is, unfortu-
nately, the home of many Philadelphians, so
no particular description is required for
such an establishment. They are pretty
much alike in furniture, table and inhabi-
tanGs. The parlors are all provided with a
variety of uncomfortable chairs, with an
ugly square piano, with crayon portrait of
a mild male being, who is alleged to be the
landlady's husband, late or living, on the
wall, and a certificate Of school proficiency
or grand army membership, framed, and
relating to a daughter or son OF the land
lady, or the other. The room always las
the air of not belonging to anybody in par
ticular, and at once takes away any feeling
of being at home. Then the daily fare: the
regulation breakfast of ham and eggs,
small pieces of tough steak and cakes fried
| in dripping, the dinner of soup, roast and
dessert, and the supper of cold meat and
preserves-the cold meat invariably beef;
the preserves, apples In winter and
peaches in Summer. And the boarders,
they come and go, mouth in
and month out, in constant sue
cession; yet is there anybody who has
lived in q boarding house for two months at
stretch and not been one of a company at
table which includes Two or more spins.ers
of doubtful age, half q dozen unattached
~ r., ~
man and three OF more mothers, accompa-
MED by callow offspring, whose sole object
IN life appears to he to drink all the milk
and howl "Mamnia" in every range of
| falsettof la,I.N7E Ia ~.
"Now, how would you get on with thai
| sort of crowd to provide for every day, +"
asked the landlady of Girard street board
| ing house, as she sat on the steps last even.
ing, tanning herself.
The newly-arrived boarder, to whom the
| question was put, was very sure he should
| not like the job. He had Just noticed at
supper the enormous appetite possessed by
the leanest of the three spinsters, and how
| the fat man gorged himself with pickels.
| "No, you would not, know" continued
the landlady, "and yet doubt if there is a
| single person who lives IN my house who is
In the least contented with the accommoda-
ton. get nothing but complaints from
morning to night. One does not like his
mattress, another the bread, third the but
ter, fourth the soup aud so on. Then the
mothers come TO me and aceus each 9th RS
children, or object TO the young man in the
hall room because he smokes on the stairs,
or relate fancied insults they imagine they
| have received at each others hands. / tell
you what it is, sir, If you wish to make peo-
pie thoroughly detest each other, put them
in the same boarding house.
81 have had boarders here who might
have lived hundred years In friendship
had they been always residing two squares
apart; but In the same house they quarrel
most bitterly about nothing at all. One, we
we will say, comes down to the table first,
aud eats the heart of the lettuce; the other
arrives, and finds only the outside leaves,
thinks 1t is done oD purpose, and Immediately
| begins covert remarks about some persons
greediness A reply soon follows, and
coolness ensues, which speedily develops
into detestation and daily teuds. | am, of
course, the judge Of appeal to both parties:
and what can dol They both pay me the
| same rent"
care you ever swindled out of your
rent F
swell, no. generally obtain it in ad-
vance, and seldom allow one weeks non
| payment to run into a second. You think
could seize the trunks as security? Yes.
| but can't pay my butcher with peoples
trunks. There are ways, however, in which
l lose just as badly as il | were paid. The
prices ask here are as fine as they can be.
I'd ask more out for the opposition of the
| business"
"Do you find boarders stay long in the
same house ~
mo, do not. Boarders are ALWAYS rest
less and longing for Il change. There is
sure to be something which does not suit
them, and oil they go. There are some who
come here and stay much too long, | am
sorry to say, for my money"
You mean beats"
mo, not beats, but almost as bad. It's
the young men who have lust gone into
business and whose whole wages Just about
pay for their board. Why, eating is the
only pleasure they have, and, Lord how
they do take it out OF you'll You never saw
| wolves to- nd
see you can't limit them things have had
young men boarders who have had such
enormous appetites that have been forced
10 say L shall require your room this day
WeekP Why Two or three of them will get
down early and clear the table before The
rest OF the people have chance to put in a
fork"
why do you take them in the first
placeW
chow can you tell! Everybody is wei
come enough to eat in reason. It's only by
experience that you discover the wolves,
lhey look the most lamb-like creatures
when they come to engage board, and they
can help their appetites, after all said and
uOhe, only poor woman like me can't
anord TO indulge them at the price they
pay"
The landlady was called away and the
boarder was left to his meditations. His
CONCLUSIONS were that she resembled the
majority of her kind. A cool, stern eyed
woman, plainly dressed, with an "I-m1st-
sk-you-ior-your-rent t-sir" air constantly on
her lips. woman who looked as if she
occasionally longed for little home of her
nome, where there were no intruders at S. a
week. A woman who was soured and dis
trustlul, thanks to the constant struggle for
oread. She possibly had husband; if so.
he was, to all intents and purposes, non.
entity in the house, and, If noticed at all,
regarded as an old boarder who did not
seem to care about acquaintances 1t would
not DO for landlady's husband to become
ultimate with his wife's boarders. They
would pump him as to the price paid for
butter, and abuse him because the milk was
stale.