Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1883-03-14
INITIATED IN MASONRY.
The Bad Boy Gives His Father
The Royal Bumper Degree.

! TOOK out long Sllch vi cIuualhOh
bark to chew.
"Why, yes, of course | am; but
what set you to thinking Of that ~
asked the grocery-man, as be went to
the desk and charged the boys father
with half pound of cinnamon.
"Well, do The goats bunt when you
nishiate fresh candidate 2"
mo, of course not The goats are
cheap ones that have no life, and we
muzzle them, and put pillows over
their heads, so they cant hurt any
body" says the grocery-man, as he
winked at brother Odd Fellow who
was seated on a sugar barrel, looking
mysterious But why do you ask ~
80, nuthin, only | wish me and my
chum had muzzled our goat With a
pillow. Pa would have enjoyed his
becoming a member of our lodge bet
ter. You see, pa had been telling US
how much good the Masons and Odd
Fellers did, and said we ought to try
and grow up good, so we could jine
the lodges when we got big, and L
asked pa if it would do any hurt for
us to have a play lodge in my room
and purtend to nishiate, and pa said it
would not do any hurt. He said it
would improve our minds and teach US
to become men, So my chum and me
borried a goat that lives in livery
stable and carried him up to my room
when pa and ma was out riding, but
the goat blatted so we had to tie a
handkerchief around his nose, and his
feet made such noise on the floor that
we put some baby's socks on his feet.
Well, sir, my chum me practiced with
that goat until he could bunt the pic
ture of goat every time. We borried
a buck beer sign from saloon man
and hung it on the back of a chair, and
the goat hit it every time. That night
pa wanted to know what we were do
ing up in my room, and | told him we
were playing lodge, and improving our
minds, and pa said that was rig ht,
and that there was nothing that
did boys of eur age half so much good
as to initiate men, and store by youth
full knowledge. Then my chum asked
pa if he didn't want TO come up and
take the grand bumper degree, and pa
laughed and said he didn't care if he
did, Just to encourage the boys in in
nocent pastime that was so improving
to our intellect We had shut the goat
up in the closet in my room, and he
had got over his batting, so we took
off the handkerchief, and he was eat
ing some of my paper collars and
skate straps.
We went up stairs and told pa to
come up pretty soon and give three
distinct raps, and when we asked him
who comes there be must say "a pill
grim who wants to join your ancient
order and ride the goat Ma wanted
to come up, too, but we told her if she
came in it would break up the lodge,
cause a woman couldn't keep secret
and we didn't have any side saddle for
the goat. Say, efyou never tried it,
the next time you nishiate man in
your Mason's lodge you sprinkle a
little kyan pepper on the goats beard
just before you turn him loose. You
can get three times as much fun to the
square inch of goat Well, we got all
fixed and pa raped, and we let him in
and told him he must be blindfolded,
and be got on his knees laughing, and
tied a towl around his eyes and then
| turned him around and made Kim
get on his hands also, and then his
hack was right toward the closet door,
and | put the buck beer sign right
against pas clothes. He was lafling
all the time. and said we boys were full
of fun as they made 'em, and we told
him it was solemn occasion, that we
wouldn't permit no levity, and if he
wouldn't stop lailing we couldn't give
him the grand bumper degree. Then
everything was ready, and my chum
had his hand on the closet door and
some kyan pepper in his other hand,
/ asked pa in low bass tones if he
felt as tho he wanted to turn back, or
if he had nerve to go ahead and take
the degree. | warned him that it was
full Of dangers, as the goat was loaded
for beer, and told him he yet had time
to retrace his steps if he wanted to-
He said he wanted the whole business
and we could go on with the manage
rie. Then said to pa that if he de
cided to go ahead and not blame US fol
the consequences, to repeat after me-
the following Bring forth the Roya
Bumper and let him bump " Pa re
peated the words, and my chun
sprinkled the kyan pepper on the
goats moustache. and he sneezed one,
and looked sassy, and then he saw th'
lager beer goat rearing up, and h
. started for it just like a cow-catche
and blattcd Pa is real fat, but h,
knew he had got hit, and he grunte'
and said: "Hell's fire what are you
boys doin'?" and then the goat CAV
him another degree, and be pulled Of
the towel and got up and started 70
the stairs, and so did the goat, and nj
was at the bottom of the stairs listen
ing, and when looked over the hanis
ters pa and ma and the CONT were al
in heap, and pa was yelling murder
and ma was screaming fire, and th
goat was batting, and sneezing, anC
bunting, and the hired girl came int
! the hall and the goat took after her
! and she crossed herseltjust as the goa
/. hit her, and said: "Howly mother pro
+ tect me ~ and went down stairs th
way we boys slide down hill, will
r both hands on herself, and the goa
, rared up and blatted, aud pa and mi
went into their room and shut tn,
door, and then my churl and me open
ed the front door and drove the goa
out. The minister, who comes to sc,
ma three times a week, was just ring
ing the bell, and the goat thought ht
wanted to be nishiated, too, aud CAV,