Arizona weekly citizen., 1883-03-25
BreVities.

| Wiggins' storm and the much-looked
 fter No. One" should form 2 comoina-
 Ion and lecture.
 The best fire-escape is when your
 sife gets up in the morning and makes
 t. Boston Commercial Bulletin.
 Spell-bound-The boy at the foot of
 lass who Is stupid on a long, hard, crooked word.-Bnrlington Hawkeye.
 Pnt away his litle tables | That he used to brag about; | He IS done with all his fables; l He has climed the golden spout.
 The latest novelty is a looking glass | upon whose surface can be found lndl-
 ,atlons of clear sky or coming storms. ! uch looking glass should be placed | lpon the weather D...eaU. IL has been remarked that every min | 1T knows his load, but the history of
 he rise and fall of the tOy-plstol has | proven that every miner dosen't know lis load.-YoDkers Gazette.
 Sitting Bull says he would not return ! ,O the war-path on any consideration, ont he feels as if he would be a success IS railroad ticket scalper in Denver or Omaha.-Detroit Free Press. 4 New York druggist IS going to ! open twenty-four soda fountains in Lon don this summer. It will be fun to see the Englishmen sit down to wait for the
 oam to settle.-Dstroit Free Press. Pipes frOzen?" he said. Well. I'll go and call plumber, and you have the roof scuttle opened. He wont be able to tell what to do to that sink-spout till ue has been upon the roOf."-Bos- tOs Post.
 ''Yes," said the society belle, "Mr. De La Mere has insulted me. But I'll be revenged. I'll dance german with him and step on his toes and get my train in his way at every possible oppor- tunIty."
 Whenever you see a man coming out of a country drugstore, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, you may know that the town is suffering un- der combined attack of malaria and li- censs law.
 When man Is dismissed from em- plOyment he always has a good deal to say about his employers. 4 man, in fact Is like gun. He makes a great noise when he discharges Trascript.
 4 young man named Polk sang all the evening to a company of friends at Montgomery. Alabama, and then shot himself dead. He probably preferred suicide to being lynched. .-Rochester Post-Express.
 Julia, my little cherub, when does your sister Emma return?' T don't know" Didn't she say anything before sue went away" "5he said if you came see her she'd be gone till dcomsdsy" Exchange.
 Do you sing in church, Mrs. Dobbs?" 'I did formerly. Mir. Hobbs, bat nows- days I am so thankful when our long distance pastor gets through his dis course that l always sing as soon as l get out of church"-Yonkers Gazette.
 Henry" writes Ls, asking how he can break his mother of calling him. You He-ner-ryr' He says that he has noticed that whenever she calls him that way she always gives him a licking and sends him to bed without his SUD- Der.
 4 boy who does not sigh to become a stsgs-driver. hunter, a fireman or pirate will make Q fiap-iack sort of man, who may possibly learn to cobble shoes, but will not be smart enough to put a bolt on a door.-Detroit. Free Prss.
 Fashionable young club men of New York, cans aims, sans brains. who ape the British snobs in their dress, are called dudes" We don't see much econ my Ia the new name. The old title, idiots" contains only one more lette:.- -Norristovn Herald.
 What has become of all those seien- tist with their brain-food diet: We want to see just one man before We die who has ever sharpened up his natural talents by either pouring whisky into his stomach or craming fish into his head.-Detroit Free Press.
 A Milwaukee travelling man writes that he crossed a slab bridge up Tn Mariaette countyfwhich probably cost $40, and over the bridgeiwas the follow ing Notice" "Dosnt kum kros that l bridge fsstr nor wax, or you will go to lok ID. and pay 8 fyne to kounty for | skOul fund" 5Peck's Sun.