Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Anacortes, Wash. Ter.) 1882-1887, 1883-04-14
THE GLASS EYE.
A Young Man Who Hesitated to Mention
His Ocular Defect.
THE COMMANDANT WHO SLEPT
WITH ONE EYE OPEN.

A young man with glass eye was
engaged to be married, but he did not
like to inform his betrothed of his oc-
ular defect. A week previous to the
day named for the wedding he con-
fided in his future father in law who,
to his surprise, received the inform
alton in a highly amused manner.
"rll make it all right for you, my
boy; you initiate me exactly in any
thing | do after supper tonight, and
see how good naturally Maria THAT
was the lady's name) will take it"
Accordingly, as soon as the evening
meal was concluded, the father looked
at the young man and began to sing:
Oh, do you know the glass-eye man.
The glass-eye man, the glass-eye man?
Oh, do you know the gluss-eye man
Who lives down our way?
And, as he concluded the last line, he
took out his left eye and placed it on
plate in front of him. The young
man was very much astonished to
find his Maria's father as unfortunate
as himself, while at the same time it
gave him courage to reply:
Oh, yes, know the glass-eye man
Who lives down our way,
and to deposit his crystal optic on the
table Maria was convulsed with
laughter at the proceedings, but her
future husband was ready to believe
all humanity one-eyed when she
trebled forth:
also know the glass-eye man
Who lives down our way,
and dropped her eye into "A glass OF
water by her side.
Frequent assaults and battery have
been made by sternly virtuous females
in cars on glass-eyed men. Only re-
Gently gentleman was enjoying the
scenery through the car window
with hi; natural eye, unaware of the
fact that his glass-eye was staring
straight ahead at a maiden lady of
Sunday school principles. She put
up with it for half an hour, and then
got up and, smashing his hat over
his head, called him a licentious vii
liam and other complimentary cpl
thets, and was only prevented from
scratching his face by his timely re
treat to the smoking car under the
supposition that he had been attacked
by mad woman.
Fifty years ago, when California
was under the dominion of Spain,
one eyed commandment ruled at San
Francisco, who was the terror of all
the Indians in the vicinity. A Yankee
skipper travelling that way induced
the Spaniard to purchase one of the
then newly-invented glass eyes of
him, and, to the fear and surprise of
the red skins, the commandment sud
denly appeared with two eyes. This
was too much for the braves. SO one
of their number was deputed t. as
sassinate ike senior. He managed to
gain access to his chamber. but, on
approaching the couch, twas terrified to
find the commandment sleeping with
one eye closed and the other wide
open. The amazed Indian gave an
unearthly yell and threw himself
headlong from the window
One of the most curious stories is
the case of supposed blind besgar
in Paris. This man was arrested for
some trivial offense. and, on his way
to prison. one of his eyes fell out on
the sidewalk. On being examined it
was discovered that for long time
he had been in the habit of wearing
two ingeniously -contrived porcelain
covers to his real eyes, which were of
different color to the sham ones,
and he was at once recognized as a
criminal for whom the authorities
had long been in search.
A glass eye once figui ed in civil
trial. An optician sued woman for
the value of an eye he had inserted
for her with the promise that she
would find il both ornamental and
useful. The woman declined t. pay,
her defense in court being as follows:
II have false teeth; l can eat with
them. Ihave false hair; it keeps my
head warm and is ornamental. I
have also false leg; can walk with
it. But taking her glass eye out
and dashing it to the ground Il can
neither see with my false eye nor is
it an object of beauty" She gained
her suit Philadelphia Press.