Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1883-07-06

] the florists, where she ordered profusion
ct flowers; and to the pastry cook g where
she heaitated between water ices, and Ma.
politan cream; and finally went home,
weared but triumphant.
IN show the Chinese ambassador that
there is some style about his country
coas,ns.' y she declared, to Ethel and Con-
stantia, who were remodeling their
old dresses, to appear as new as possible.
And really Mrs. Jones' parlors did ap-
pear exquisitely tasteful and pretty when
the eventful evening arrived.
| The chardeiiers-newf for the occasion
were draped with smilax; the mantels
banked with cyclamen and begonia leaves:
the angles of the apartment filed with tall
palms ard stately ferns.
Miss Buckley was there, with her violin,
and a package of music nearly az large as
a Saratoga trunk; the ex-governor and his
lady were on time, and this assistant Dish.
lop of the Cranberry swamp diocese ap-
I Pesleaa, in red-nosed andpompous man
ner, with his cousin, Mrs. Heatherley,
leaning on his arm. And, as the room
began to fill, Mrs. Jones waxed little
nervous.
II do hope nothing has happened to the
train" she thought. IF he shouldn't be
here, after all, should feel myself social
fraud"
But, as the Antwerp clock in the cor
ner struck ten, there as little hustle,
the sound of retreating earriage-wheels-
Uncle Jones had arrived
And the guests parted right and left, to
admit of the entrance of a stout old gen.
tleman 10 a suit of home-dyed butternut-
brown, a pair of silver spectacles, very red
hands, entirely innocent Of gloves, and a
blue-necked shirt.
s'WelI, Niece Jones,'' said this remarka-
apparition, grasping Mrs. Jones's pretty,
little kid-gloved hands. Ppm dreadful
glad to make your acquaintance. And
this 'ere's Peter is it hain't seen Peter
since he was boy"
'Uncle," said Mrs. Jones. with a sort
of hysteric gasp, "allow me to present to
| you-"
''Oh, yes, l see,'' said Uncle Jones,
Company to tea, eh? Your servant, ladies
and gentlemen, your servant" bowling
Complementary around the room. And
seein' we're all here together, so nice and
friendly, he added, "I'll jest ask you all
to look at new kind o. salve as we took
the agency of-the Electric Agony Eradi-
| Gator only twenty-five cents box, and
| five boxes for dollar. Business is bust
ness, you know, and as make my living
this way, I'm sure my niece and nephew
here won't object to my selling off the
stock-in trade to the best advantage be-
tore I leave the country. Perhaps the
| company don't know that 1 sail as skipper
of the Lovely Louise next month-up to
the Newfunlan' fshin-banks, and round
by way of Nova Scotia ?''
But gasped Mrs. Jones, I'VE thought
that is, we understood-we read in the
aeper. would say-tbat you were to be
4 the ambassador to China"
.'Mep' said Uncle Jones. mot if |
know it Me go to furrin parts, to be eat
en- up with chopsticks. or burned alive by
the coolies ? I guess not! P'r'aps it's
John j. Jones you're thinking about. He's
from the same place as I ana great
friend of the administration land I've
heerd as he's got a plump office from the
big-bugs at Washington. Pm John j.
Jones-Jacob, you know, arter my great
grandfather, as was in the blacksmithy
business. Oh, amt no Chinese ambar.
sador! Pm only salve-manufacturer
It'd dreadful good for frosted feet and
ears, the Electric Agony Eradicator' is
and p'r'aps l may have good chance to
sell few gross of boxes on board the
Lovely Louise, il it's middlin' cold
trip"
Poor Mrs. Jones stood aghast as the dis
tinguished guest of the evening circulated
around amid the perfumed groups, with
his ssAgony Eradicator," selling off the
precious panacea with great success.
Mrs. Heatheriy g,geled audibly the as
sistant bishop elevated his Roman nose
with an air of super ciliousness the fail
yiolinist laid down her bow, and only The
instant announcement of supper would
have prevented general dissolution Of
this social parliament.
Uncle Jones ate as if he were starved
wolf, and then drank as be had been trans
formed into fish and finally fell asleer
ON sofa IL the corner and snored aloud
with his pocket full of ''salye-b oxes'' and
a handkerchief over his face.
He went home the next day. The Cher
ry hill Jones's did not urge him to stay
longer and Mrs. Heatherley called tc
condoie with Mrs. Jones in person.
sit must have been so notifying to the
poor thingI'' said she, with simulated SYM
pathy.
But Mrs. Jones did not see her. She was
crying in her own room, and sent down
! message of s'Not at home.'
Il don't care how soon we leave Cherry
hill" she sohbed. 81 never can look any
one in the face again. I never was so
ashamed in all my life! And if ever any
one mentions the name China or the
Chinese in my presence again, I'll COM
nit suicide. that will -
For Mrs. Jones's party had not been a
| success.
A ,REMARKABLE AND SAD GOMEZ
DENCE.-J Judge Jeffries of King and
Queen. recently held special term of the
Circuit Court in Williamsburg for judge
| Henley. In connection with it we are in
formed of sad coincidence. When asked
hv .Indea HanlaY to sit for him Judge