Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-12-23

son was in town. and Colly was mistaken
for him and assaulted for the pirrose oil
robbery.
Gene here, my little dear" said bash
full North End young man to little girl
whose sister he was counting, you are the
sweetest thing on EARTH"
mo, am not" she replied, "because
sister says you are the sweetest. The
question was popped next day.
Some OF our youSg lsdies with bashful
lovers and little sisters should take heed,
and as the youth of to-day would say,
work this racket"
was down at the B. 4 0. express office
the other day and was surprised to see the
large number OF articles shipped to friends
outside the city. But what struck me most
was the immense number of little brown
Jugs" that were sent out the road. Iester-
day morning th!rty-s.ven jugs OF whiskey
we're shipped to persons along the line
with which to celebrate Christmas, and
they have been going out every day for the
past week. A great many were sent to
prohibition towns and people will wonder
wi ere the imbibers Occurred their "booze."
50
A sort of green chap, who must have
struck a small stake in some way, and
wanted to sppear fly, walked up to cigar
stand in hotel, the other day, and called
cut loud enough to be heard by all the by
ISLANDERS:
Say, pard, give me good ten center,
and the clerk, seeing he was rather OIL
color, gave him twenty-scenter, and every
tue the chap would blow his smoke into
The face of anyone, the person would turn
up his nose and walk away. The fellow
tt a hid yelled ont aud asked him where he
caught CD to the "siinkadora."
Wheeling still retains her boosted moral
iN-that is as fer as is open to tie public
raze end inspection. At the Comique last
week the performance ended with sort Of
ninuet dance. saw nothing so terrible
III the dance. but some people did. Maybe
il was because ! have seen far worse ones
and they haven't; don't know though
Anyway, the dance was stopped-that is
th, Objectionable part was dispensed with.
OF course. If there were any features in 1t
that were Of an immoral character, ii was
not conducive Of eleyating the morals OF
the youth who attend this place of amuse.
meat. But let me whisper right here that
IN aStOnlshirg'y large number OF the boys
Of W. ceiling are so bad that it would take
more than variety show TO make them
worse. Some oil them are in snch conii-
H., mat 1t would be an impossIblity u
u. Their str0y their morals. Ihen 'here :
ap.tler 'hi..-if ;.rup:e don't like a sh| -
rh,y have the undisputed privilege OF stay
M outside.
4 chattarer is al amusing character, but
orc II ay gain great deal Of wisdom from
he laNble If be keep his ears op2n
and takes notes. On car tie other day
one Of these individuals amused me with
his inCessant chatter. until just as | had
about reached my destination, he dropped
into thoughtful mood, apropos OF mar.
risges where the wealth is all on one side.
a fellow of any brains said be, can get
INTO any family he desires TO, If he only
makes the attempt in the proper way. on
see there are 30 many young men VINO
amount 10 so little. that when fellow has
anv sand at ali ] had passed a square
beyond my stopping place 10 get the poin'
Of the mans argument. and stepped OIL
.ust in tune 20 miss the last OF the sen.
lerce. However, the idea is worth the at.
tenliun Of souo Of oar young men, for, a
the fellow said, gentlemen, Ill every seIse
Of The word, Gre rather scarce.
had peculiar dream the other night.
dreamed that Was in churCh--this aiDlc
was startlinglv siuGIiar-and st the time
wtc. the collection plate sh2nli have been
passed around. ius, cad 81 that, the.minis'
Ter invited the CONGREGATION 10 small
table where sort OF free lunch had been
spread. asked a person sitting beside
ms If it wss love FEAST no. said he,
"its new way they nave oftaking up a col.
lection. They charge thee cents per
lunch" | noticed that a good many availed
themselves OF The opportunity, and bust
le.s see med to be brisk, when suddenly An
acquaintance Of mine, gentleman pr0mi
inent in free lunch circles, appeared and
went up to the table. After eating several
pieces OF bologna and bread he called for a
gloss Of beer. | was ~ shocked that ]
aWOke with a start aud found had very
bad case OF indigestion.
-
Don't you know think the word dude
ought TO be abolished. II is becoming too
disgustiDgly frequent and painfully OBJ
noxious. If young man happens to have
his clothes cut in the latest style and wears
Q clean collar and cuffs, he is called dude.
y, W, where the sense or fun comes in in
this cannot see, and people who call
young men dudes. only show that those
young men are superior to them as far as
neatBCss of appearance goes. Dute only
siU ti.s ms "a
gprntsl Callbre. Let UP on dude an 1 re.
turn 10 the word dandy" or swell" They
sound great deal more respectable. IL
member, that because q man wears line
clothes he isn't always a fool-not by aoy
means, and although gentleman's heart
often beats beneath poor coat, a fine coat
Just as often covers such a heart. II is
jLst as much folly and Stiffness to riliCIle
! man because he wears fine clothes as l.
is TO sCoh at man bccsuse he wears rag
ged suit. Let up on DUDE,
was IN the place OF business Q! a prom
inent Main street merchant the otne: day,
VIXEN with a rush in came couHtryman,
WHO, in breaihlcss. excited tone asked:
Say, mister, doc, your telephone run 10
SteUbeLyiile?
"Yea, sir, it does, said the clerk. Bat
it will cost you quarter 10 speak 70 sly
one there"
oh, don't care II it costs thirty cents.
What want is my do. came through
Sieubenvi!le to-day and los: my dog there
and just found it out. II gi.e fifty cents
il they cen send him down 10y that ma.
chine
The clerk here saw good opportunity
for Joke, so be said: An right. Give
me description of the dog and I'll zee
what can be done for you"
wall. he is white dog with big ysller
spots all over, about two feet high and
slim as fence rail. Good dog, though,
you bet, il be ism purity. Stranger If you
can git that do-. I'll set EN- up.
well, said the clerk, lit will take some
little time 10 get him down here. II you
will drop in in about an hour think can
have him for you"
"All right. Ill be in on time, and don't
forget I'll set 'em up il You fetch the dog, "
and he went out
AS soon ss he had left the clerk told one
OF the boys to go out and find dog as near
the description as possible and bring him
III. The boy did so and in about bali an
hour cane back with great lean. lank Z,
cur. that would have diseyscsd the name