Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1883-03-05
The ROOster-Pecked Wife.
SCENE FIRST.

struts with dignity toward his little.
spouse.
Biddy-"Good morning, my dear.
O. c., Esq, l"Morning, madam; !;
quite enjoying yourself, madam; of.
course, you are not aware of the fact
that have been up more than an
hour, and have not yet eaten mouth-s
full! Is this what [ married you for,s
madam? Gives her a pointed sa-s
lutte on the ankle. Where are your
domestic qualities, madam? I'm
prints mark of affection on the top
of her head. Where was your smile
of welcome when you saw me getting
off the fence? 1 watched you, mad
am! Where was your tender female
solicitude when you beheld me look
ing weakly for want of a little nour-
ishment? Where, l repeat, is my
breakfast? Cock -adoodle-do p
Biddy (meekly)-.'Have worm,
dear?"
O. c., Esq, (solemnly)-''I will"
SCENE SECOND.
Mrs. Biddy Chanticleer lays her
first egg, and has invited two or
three female friends to cackle, Co.
c., Esq, being absent.)
Mrs. Biddy-"Cut, out, cut, cut
a-a-a cut, cut, cut-a-a-a-a-cutp p
Mrs. Partalett-''Qua, qua, qua.
cut-a-a-cut !'
Mrs. Penfeather-"Cluck, cluck,
qua, qua, cut, cut, cut-a-a-a-cut! !!
Us interrupted by the sudden appear
ance of O. c., Esq, who had just
returned from a stage party.)
0. c., Esq. .,-s'Cock-a-doodle-do!
Now may patience be vouchsafed me
to ask of you, madam, what does this
mean? Here am returning, care
worn and exhausted. from the excite
ments and temptations of a delusive
world, expecting to find repose and
peace in the quiet of the domestic
nest, instead of which | discover you
in the midst of riot and dissipation.
Madam, insult not my penetration
| by DENYING it affirm that YOU are
having party!''
Mrs. Biddy (apprehensively)-
"Not at all, my dear; at least, that
is, my friends were just going by,
and stopped in quite accidentally,
and so, for you see, my dear, I've
laid an egg-cut, cut-a-a-c-that is,
at least, yes, sir, we've laid an
egg!"
Three female friends stimultane-
ously-"Cut, cut, cut, cut-a-a-a-
cut p
o. c., Esq, (majestically) :
"Peace, hens madam, what does
all this cackling folly mean %
Exeunt hens in indignation.
''Mrs. B. c., it has become neces-
sary, at this stage of our matrimonial
career, that l should state, in mild
but unmistakable terms, my opinions
regarding the appropriate sphere and
duties of henhood.
'sFirst, self-devotion-It has been
the decision of all rooster-kind, for
ages, and therefore cannot be denied,
that the crowning virtue of the hen
character is disinterestedness. A
true hen should be patient, self-for-
getful, obedient, tendeTly solicitous
for husbands little wants, delighting
wholly and solely in the graceful and
: domestic nest. On the contrary,
!, find you thinking only how to graft
, sy your own selfish tastes and desires
instead of displaying Gas might nat
urally be expected) some little sense
r of loneliness and melancholy at yonl
t husbands absence; | return from 9
l., visit of nearly twelve hours, and fine
you literally rejoicing! Madam,
ask of you, is this true henhood?
9 "Second- retiring position, 6
= delicate shrinking from contact will
d the coarse and unsympathizing world
J. an exclusive Indifference to all with
d out the sacred circle of the domestic
nest. On the contrary, find yol
1t gadding among the other hens of tn,
yard, making appointments, sending
f invitations. Again, l ask of you
t. madam, is this true henhood?"
% sThird-Freedom from curiosity
.r a true hen never evinces the slightes
interest in the affairs of her neigh
. bors, scarcely in her own; she neve
inquiries concerning the whereabout
n or actions of her husband, being per
:" fectly assured that, wherever he be
ut and however appearances at the tim
may seem to tell against him, he
Oh ever acting with view to the wei
fare of the nest.
''On the contrary, what do l fin
Il to be truth in regard to yourself
r, Not rooster raises his voice with
Mt half mile of the yard, but you al
able to name him; not hen lays a
~ egg but you begin to cackle.'
- - Mrs. Biddy, (meekly)-"I'ge lai
t,s an egg cut, cut, cut-a-a-a. No,
n, mean, slr, we've laid an egg"
us o. c., Esq, with solemn anims
IT. tion)-''You've laid an egg! An
~ pray, where is the thlng?" (Walk
briskly to the nest and takes a micro
30 30 scopic view of the object.)
,is Biddy-s. cut mean will
it. do, sir?"