Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1883-10-05
FUN
The Squatter Wrestles.
HE REFUSES TO GIVE INFORMATION, AND
Is DoUBLY SURPRISED.

An Old 1ell0W Win grlZziV DeaTO Nd
lips indelibly dyed with tobacco juice sat
on log near rude house in Arkansas
A s.stranger." well dressed and muscled
in no delicate way, rode up, dismounted
the old man, and said:
II am lost"
wall. did I saw yer wan't2"
The sstsanger'' took off his coat and
rolled up his sleeves 81 know all about
you,n he said. "You are an Arkansaw
squatter, and have been living here since
u.s. Hundreds Of benighted beings, lost
in these Internal woods. have begged you
for information concerning the road they
desired to follow, and you have given them
all kinds Of evasive replies. 1 am prize
fighter, and have been sent here by an
eastern syndicate to thump you into civil
lied submission. Now, 1 don't like to
pummel an old man, and propose to give
you chance. How would you advise me
to get out of this community 20
I'D advise yer ter rlde.''
Come now, none of your foolishness.
Which way would you advise me to ride?"
''As fast as you KEN"
II see that I'll have to discharge my
duty. thought at first that I ID scare you
by saying that was priZe-fghter. am
only an unpretentious citizen and have
come long way to look for the house of
Emanuel Peters,
wall, why don't yer look ?"
81 have looked"
s'Look agin.''
but which way must I look ?''
''Outen your eyes, reckin."
"Old man, I'll have to fight you.''
''All right,o and turning around be yell
ed: sOh, Tom, tell yer muir an the chillun
ter come out here. for we're gwine to have
some fun. Fetch the gun an dog with
yer.''
don't be skeered. You won't hurt
me.''
ssBut / don't want you to hurt me.''
s'Then mosey.''
81 won't mosey. For the last two days
l have been looking for the house OF
Emanuel Peters, and have been put 5ff by
such fellows as you, and | have decided
not to stand it any longer. Now, am
going to jump on you," and without CIV
ing the Oh man time to reply be seized
= bin. The old fellow exhibited remarkable
activity, and in moment had thrown tho
young man against the ground with
force that made his teeth clatter. He was
up again in an instant. This time he Sc
cured better hold. He danced around in
a way Of which the old man could hardly
keep track. Tom and the old woman came
out, but did not bring the dog and gun.
swatch his capers, pap" said the old
lady. Hug him, fur he's mighty peart."
Finally the young man downed the old
fellow, sat on him and asked:
"Now, will you tell nae where can find
Emanuel Peters ?"
Il amt never objected ter tellin' whar
the old man ISL
Eyes. you did," and be held the old fel-
low in manner not to be mistaken for
gentleness.
Yer never axed whar the old man was.
l. Cl dACQ Wudl Wdo LIS uOuScs uc Olu
maa amt got no house The high water
washed it over on another feller's land,
an since that he has been rentln'it.''
''Well, where's the old man 2''
Pm him.
"Great goodness % said the young fell
low, arising, I'm your son and haven't
seen you since 1 was child"
well, I'll be dog gon !" exclaimed the
old fellow, grasping his sons hand. 81
thought something strange when l felt yer
grip. l mouter knowed then that yer be-
ionged ter the fam ly. Muir, s'lute yer son.
Tom, fetch the bottle an my yaller coat.
This is occasion for putin on style. D.
Arkansas ITaceller.
THE DRUGGISTS ANswER.-"What do
you mean by such carelessness p'' exclaim-
ed man who entered the drug store in
terribly excited manner. what do you