Morning journal and courier., 1883-09-20
FRAUD.

s'I'm getting disgnsted with everything ant everybody" exclaimed Brown, peevishly Wherever I go there Is fraud. ."-Trans-
 cript. --
 fortune awaits the man who will invenl penholder that you can't stick into ths mucilage bottle, and 8 mucflage brush thai won't go into the inkstand. Star. There is said to be ssnew trouble with hogsr in the West. The old trouble still ex. ists here of making them occupy but one seat in railway Commercial Bulletin. q love that man with all my heart" said e Philadelphia girl, ssbut the trouble is that ii
 answer yes, everybody will say that mar ried for money. He is an editor. ."-Un. identified Exchange. - -sE- - A happy family: Nsighbor-"Your family
 looks contented and happy" Mother
 'sYes; the boys are happy because they're
 through with their whipping-and the girls
 are happy because they didn't get any.''-
 Puck. la
 for whom she says all ladies express the great. est admiration, asked an editor how she can cure him of his aversion to the female sex.
 ':Make minister of him, replied the practi- cal editor.
 Whats the good of giving vennor all the glory of predicting storms, anyway? We've got man in The News office who predicts storms when the heavens are covered with
 stars. When he starts home from the club
 at 8. m- he always says there will be a
 storm before mor1ing, and it always como as
 soon as he gets in the house.-PhiIadslph
 News. s-sz-T
 stSee here. n said the star to the manager, If you are going to have bouquets handed to me every night why don't you get decent
 ones2 Look at this, to nights; it's all wilted. Why can't always have as good Bouquet Id Iz-A A-,s- Gsa- you had last niRhtas shrieked the manaoer:
 ssWhy, holy sunHower, it's the same one.''- Lowell Citizen. es
 :. Cleveland has young lady with a bullet in her brain. Although she was shot only three weeks ago her condition has so steadily improved that she is now able to be about she house, and has actually gone down the street shopping. Tell you what When ai girl has got her mind set on going shopping. even bullet through the head won't stop her.-Boston Post. ia@ &+a=1 E5i Re ]. .Haant the chance of a .doe.-ssWhy don't you feed that dogSss 2 was a6ked of sn old negro. Why doan I feed hin7' ssYes. why don't you feed him?" s'Why doan I feed my self? Ise eas i1unGty as do dog is, an 'sida dat he's got de vantage ob me. Re ken 20 out an pick up piece ,ob meat an, go bout his business, an de white folks doan say n1thinsy but ef picks up suthin' to eat, da wants ter slap me in jail, sah. A nigger ain't got de chance ob . dog, nohow. '-Arkansav Traveller. errss r.s- -z-r-s : u .ss.s,.zs.7 q
 A very slight error of fact or practice will sometimes result in serious mistake. This was r66ently illustrated in school in this city. where 8 pupil who had been impressed with the force and value of double letters. such as double o' in fool, T double e,' in heel, 7 etc. was called upon to read that to1ohipg poem exhortatoFy to early rising, beginning :a & 1 ka.s sg8 ase#s'..z 7G77 $ Up. mp, Lucyi the sun is in the skytp D Surprise, which soon gave way to hilaritv. was eceasioned when the pupil read the line: tDoable ups Lncy the San is in the sky In thus giving it significance by no means con templated by the poet. et.-Boston Journal. Mrs 5Psntles, of Pennington, went ont Saturday morning to pick wild grapes and in the evening was found dead from apeplsxy. .sassso9 zzsk xa82 sasaaaassiss -a2t5 szEEE