The Pickens sentinel. [volume] (Pickens, S.C.) 1871-1903, 1883-03-08
He Broke Hin Up.

The other morning, while the urbsne
manager of Woodward's Gardens was
smoking a-four-bit cigar, and medita-
lively listening to the mutlled walls Of q
tomcat that had just been swallowed
alive by the big anaconda, n tall, thin,
notwithstanding man, with q goateo
and blue glasses, entered the gate and
remarked in IN insinuating manner:
"Of course, you pass th~ scientific
fraternityp'
"Of course, we do notr' said tho
6howman, emrhatically.
''What, not tho servants, not the pio-
neers in the great march Of the mind
into the hithclland of the infinite be-
yondP" returned the professor, with
| great surprise.
IL will not deceive you," sarcastically
replied the proprietor of the only sala,
mander; "wo pass nothing but the quilts
| IN the fretful p0rcup nes-I mean the
ress. You can't see the ostridgeS un-
sss YOU come down and put up"
Dear me. dear NOR sighed the sci
mist, refectively. ITO think that a
Professor of cosmographic oonchologv
should be denied admittance to q third
class 700! Has the Skamgatibus been
fed yet?"
"Skam-- whichP" asked the tiger
importer.
"Nhy, the Skamgatibus; you've got
one, haven't youp,
"Ye.e-s-s: | believe we've q small
female somcwhcres," said the grizzly's
friend, ubt'ully.
"Why, / never knew first-class col
lection have less than two pairs"
sad the professor, contemptuously;
chow do your Azimuths stand this cold
weather, chn'
"A imuthsP' asked the Napoleon no.
grcgator Of curiosities; what themP'
Some kind of bird-you don't mean
ostri-P'
"Ostridges be hangedP' said the sue
cessor of Darwin; "ostridges are moth
ing, I've shot more ostridges with
quail shot than you've got hairs on your
head. You don't actually mean to sit
there and tell INC you haven't got a
single Azimuth to Your backP'
"Don' believe have" admitted the
alligator breeder, mortified; "what are
they lille?"
oh! they're of the order Spinalis,
about eight feet high. Fur peels off in
tho spring, you know-thc Siberian
one of those Rectangular African Flip
goohlies that reached New York the
other dayP'
NO said the much agitated show
man; "here I've been keeping an agent
in New York on n biz salary TO look out
for attractions and he doesn't catch on
to the first blamed thing. Spends all
our money on second hand panthers
and kangaroos with the rheumatcs. I'll
bounce hlm by telegraph!"'
Haven even got Flipgoohlv, eh?"
unused the scientist, in tone of great
pity. "And | shou dn't be surprised if
yo.l didn' have o Golden Crested Gus
pidor in your whole show"
Neither have-neither have" re-
piled the wretched promoter of pelicans,
in tone of great bitterness. IS pose
you Just step in. sir. and look round;
mebbc there's something else you could
say"
Nm o. l guess not" said the tall
man. 1T would hardly pay me to
spend so much valuable scientific time
in q fourth-class show like this. Not
even an Azimuth. ehP l should think
you'd be afraid of being actually
Mobbed some time. I'm sorry for you,
my good man; sorry for you. I've no
doubt you mean we'll, but-not soli-
tary Skamgatibus-Gre Scottr'
And as the disciple of Audubon passed
into saloon across the street and
snapped lead nickel for a glass of
beer the bar-keeper heard him chuck 20
something to the effect that he had got
oven on that old hyena puncher, and
don't you forget it. - Derrick Uodd in
San francisco Post,