davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
Some Trouble with His First Paying Pa.
" g" riGnhj 20 tient. Do ,4-sn.. ii

About four o'clock the other day s
bare-headed young woman, with dishev-
eled red hair streaming in the winter
wind, fled like hunted deer down
-Fifty-second Street in the neighborhoo0
of Lexington Avenue. Her left hano
was pressed to her mouth and her light
graspedi piece of bright steel. She was
pursued by pale, breathless young man,
who in his hot haste had not stopped to
don either overcoat or hat. He was no
match in speed for the fugitive, and no
body understood his cry of n"Stop her
She has my forceps." ~ "a ''oI y
" Nearing the railroad bridge the young
woman slipped and fell. She was up and
away in moment, but the shock knocked
a dentists forceps out of her hand. She
left it -where it lay. and the man behind
darted upon it. picked it up and bore il
away in triumph - ~ = a. Z. d,
az. What is the matter?'' asked apasser.
BY. did she steal ite'' ''- ~.
e. d o. no." replied the young dentist.
for such he was. al don't suppose the
poor Girl intended to take it at all. i am
iust beginning business, and this is the
only forceps have. To tell you the
truth. that is the first paying patient
have had forshegave me fifty cents be-
fore she sat down. She is a servant girl,
1 think She was so nervous that Twas
afraid to give her the gas. z I told her ]
wanted to feel the tooth first, and Fear.
RED the forceps, concealed. as SUD-
posed. behind the palm of my hand,
toward her mouth. But she saw it., and
shook the roomwith q shrek. / received
a kick Just in, the front center Of my
waistcoat that knocked. all the breath,
outof me. and ihindered me from rum
ming fast, as you might have noticed
The foroeps Hew from my hand, and
she, without, knowing what she was do
ing, caught itllike = cricketer. and was
out of the door without her hat before ]
could half recover myself. am very
glad to get back my forceps," he con-
cluded, Epolishing the 1instlument, "bnt
I am sorry about the pbor girls half dol.
lar, and her hat, and her toothache. -
N, Y. Sun. r.5..E -.f-rJ
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
The Snail.

: Who has not watched in summer DAYS
the glistening throng Of snails upon the
banks of streams? From. the bridge al
low tide the muddy fiat scinfiiates sano
CLEANS as if .sfecked with diamonds as
the shells move in close pursuit behind
the outgoing tide, the march reversing
as it rises; continual coursing back and
forth being carried ON throughout the
summer. But the first cold wind causes a
perceptible diminution of their numbers,
aud frost finds the vast population OF the
shore far below the surface in winter
sleep. They do not assimilate food-in
other words, eat, digest or grow-untl
the terminating temperature of fifteen
degrees c., or thereabout, comes again.
The mollusks are perhaps the most re-.
markable for the long continuance OF
this condition. The land snails. during
winter close their shells. with . calcare.
GUS plate or epiphragm. leaving, a'small
oriice for breathing, and buried in the
earth, remain in quiescent state for
periods Of long duration. 1t is in this
condition, or Immediately after the
formation of the white epiphragm, that
the edible snails about Paris are most
esteemed In the British Museum are
certain shells that were brought from
Egypt and thoughtlessly gummed to a
stand, snd four years later were found
alive by the curator. They were not at
all affected by theirlong sleep. and lived
for several years after. Their pulsation,
that at the time of captnre was ITO, dur
ing Information was not distinguishable.
Many of the fresh-water mussels retreat
to the deep mud aud sleep throughout
the winter. and the same may be true Of
saltwater forms. IN. Y. Post. L..
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09


tional One pod extra per stalk would
not be mnef t6stGteIf fer but 29, 600 ON
each aero Would AMOUNT 3 q good deal
when threshing the crop.
IEAfeW seconds in time sAade by horses
has increased their value many hundred
fold, and an extra quart az milk per day
with increased richness has made many
acow famous. and sent the price of her
self and offspring from the hundreds up
into the thousands. We think every
farmer should have . hobby of some
kind. and while he ispursuing his regu-
lar avocation, he can. ride this hobby
during his, leisure hours, or do it for
relaxation from his daily toll. Choose
one If you Have not done 50 already, and
if you can find nothing better, select .
bean; for, with all Difference to the wis
dom of the age, there are few persons
living who really ''know beans."-M
I. Sun. T-.rg .s.iuu
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
A Rival to the Toy Pistol.

1t begins to look as if a person is
hardly safe in sitting down to dinner
unless provided with a life insurance
policy. Somahy people have died within
the past few weeks from the effects OF
eating pancakes, canned vegetables, ham
and dried fruit, and the usually inoffen-
sive turkey bone has proved such 5
deadly weapon in the hands Of the un.
skillful, that life is made almost miser.
able by the thought that eating. though
extremely dangerous, is the one necessity
of existence. Even a pauper is not ex-
empt from tie dangers that beset the
most selfish epicure. as the sad circum.
stances attending q charity dinner in
Germantown = few days ago clearly
demonstratea In Washington County
the wiry chicken bone caught an unsus.'
pecting man BY the throat and run him
through, and, it is but reasonable to as.
sumo that other chicken bones are lying
in wait for victims. In time the chicken
bone may become as deadly to the anna.
teur a. the toy pistol or the summer
resort sail-boat. - kiladelphiG Times.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
Soiling for Sick Horses.

The common custom is to turn horses
out to pasture when they are sick o.
y n,aa1e, ror recovering from sickness o.
! lanienessT This is especially true OF
' efEeseIcases in which the animaaF2re suf
fering from overdriving. The plaR has
had and still has many advocates, but
the more thoughtful veterinarians and
~ horse owners now questonIits utility.
i III the JottrndE of Compdrdtfre MedSeint
is an article in which the ground is taken
that horses turnedout from warm stables
teorun at large in pastures not infre-
quently catch colds, which sometimes
end in serious maladies. They have been
carefully housed, fed and groomed while
IN health, but when ailing are turned
into fields where they are exposed 10
chilling storms and scorching sun; to the
attacks of insects. to accidents. and
sometimes to fatigue from travelling over
much ground in order to get enough
food. The results of such treatment,
which might do well enough for horse
in good condition, can scarcely be othei
than harmful in many if mot in most
cases where horses are weakened by
sickness. .GAI A5tN8li \
By the soiling system, these evils may
be avoided, while all the benefits of past.
uring may, be obtainedJ The invalid
should be confined in q lot of about hall
an acre and there ted and vatered regu,
larly and carefully. Under this plan the
food could be frequently changed, the
exercise needed could be secured, pro-
!. lection from Indictment weather and
from the annoying attacks Of insects
could be given, and generally efficient
supervision over the ailing animal could
be had without trouble.
lone acre of rich ground" says the
article mentioned, will produce more
:, food, whatever the crop may be, than q
:. dozen acres of the non-productive land
!. y chat is often used for pasturing. and the
E quality as well as the quantity will be
Z greatly improved" It is. or should be,
wen known that many pastures near
great cities produce only sour soft grasses
unfit for food for a horse even when he
is in health and totally unfit, of course,
Tor the use of a horse out of condition. =
Chicago 1ratonpey,uybN aAWD5a
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
Tsld by the Postman.

"Well, suppose 1 find myself standing
at last in a stuffy, twelve-by-ffteen sit.
ting-room with q registered letter in my
hand, and after having rung every bell
in the vestibule, whistled like q locOmo-
tive and yelled Auesenskimmatterriky
again and again-for that is the best
I've been able to do with the address.
.Ish dot rechistered ledder. amt it?I'
says the husband. like enough looking
up eagerly from his cross-legged perch
on a table in the corner, with a tailor's
goose in one hand and unfinished waist
coat in the other. / nod and say
Auesenskimmatterrik over again.
"'Dere don't vos lieben many PEBBLES
here vot is called by dot Names says the
wife, perhaps engaged in nursing her
babe, while keeping the pretzels out OF
reach of toddler but a year or two old
err Il guess you vos gifen der name q
wrong blace.' "a Then the two have
a side skirmish in German, and a sudden
cackling chorus in the same lingo causes
me to,turn, and l perceive the doorway
and passages blocked up with neighbors,
mostly women, all talking excitedly at
UHCc, anu al ucNOuilHS Luc Will q SiCCoy
sort of glare, as if they'd like to loot my
whole letter bundle. Presently one Of
them, after looking over my shoulder
and mastering the inscription on the
letter in my hand. gives a gratiied
shrek, then a torrent of explanation in
German, and, with the triumphantly
correct pronunciation of 'Owzenshim
matterreiche' on her lips, tries to snatch
the missive. You see, it had belonged
to her all the time. 1t was my mispro-
nunciation of the name that had befogge6
the tailor and his wife. beside myself.
The letter is duly surrendered, after the
signature is obtained;l for these Germans
in almost every case cannot only write
but write well. and wild-goose chase
afterwriting materials never indulge in
ones embarrassments. with them. Well.
Mrs. Owzen-something gets her letter
and 1 make my escape after being sound.
ly rated by the tailor and his wife fol
.vooling honest and hard-vorking PEBBLE:
dot dom ever 60 und do me no hurt ]
don't know that that was so humorous.
after slL"-Pitsburgh Post. !. .uar
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
FARM AND PRESIDE.

The official estimates of the French
wheat crop for 1882 is lis, 702, TIP hecto-
litres, or 37S,964, 467 bushels.
:. I, -. - Rhubarb from seed is, IS easily
j grown as beans, But it will no more
come true than apple seed. Yet you
viii get some very good sorts. and may
3 propagate them from the best, -Clece.
land Herald. 80 r. ~ ~. 80 -, i" - n
u "a Colonel Curtis tells Bliss Garden
that he would rather have peck of car
rots each day to 60 with the oats. than
the same amount Of oats for the horses.
For COWS. pigs, sheep and poultry they
are equally nourishing and wholesome,
not to mention their great value as .
table vegetable.
Il have for potatoes, says Msrro1
and Farmer correspondent, used, With
good success, salt, ashes and plaster, in
Z the proportion of one bushel each OF
salt and plaster to four of good, dry
ashes, we'll mixed, I put about two
tabiespoonfulss IN . hill, kick on little
dirt and drop the potatoes in the mix
Eure, and cover three inches peep witt
mellow earth, -, ,a -,
The grand-daddy of all the sweet
potatoes was on exhibition recently at
The store of c. c. sNcC ulloch.. 1t was 8
q gam, and, when dug. weighed thirty.
b. two pounds. 40 Sweet potatoes, we be.
,lieye weigh about sixty pounds to the
oushel, so that this one was little over
: half bushel of solid potato.-Waa
(Ter.J Examiner. n os ,.Liaf 81 g.
. q "a. n.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
Cardinal Donnet's Narrow Escape from
POO '+. Being Buried Alive.

Cardinal Bonnet who has recently ex
pired in France at the age of eighty
Seven, was an excellent man, who won his
way to the height he attained by activity.
good works, tolerant spirit and 8
natural eloquence enlarged by careful
study. He was forty -one years old
when, in 1916, Louis Philippe,s Govern,
ment made him Archbishop of Dor.
deaux; but he became Cardinal in 1852.
when Louis Napoleon needed respect
abilities to fillhis Senate. Alike under
the elder Bourbons, the House of Or.
leans and the third .Bonaparte, Don.
net was popular and beloved. He also
deserves some remembrance on account
Of a singular adventure which befel him
when a young man. During an illness
his body assumed all the aspects Of
death. He was rigid, did not breathe,
and his heart ceased to beat. The medi.
cal men affirmed that the youth was
dead, and, according to the French law.
he was speedily placed in his coffin,
and every preparation was made for his
funeral. Yet all the time he was alive,
heard what was said, knew the lay and
clerical folks around him; but it was not
until the very last moment, Just as the
lid was about to be screwed down on his
narrow bed, that, by 3 desperate effort,
he broke the spell and sat up. to the
horror of all that were near. Thus was
he saved from living ientombment. 1t
was in the Senate, when arguing against
such rapid burial, that Cardinal Donnet
related his own experience to aston
ished listeners. Few men have had .
similar escape How many have been
literally buried alive.-Londo,s Tele.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
Counting Under Dimculties.

A Cleveland co. gentleman, who is
fond of . story, related 70 q reporter q
few days ago IN instance ofShypochon-
dria which came under his notice when
he was considerably younger than at the
present time. His narrative was some
thing like this: sr''Whens Irwas . boy
there lived near our house, in q part Of
Cleveland that was then almost in the
woods. q maiden lady who was in very
poor health. In igirlhooda she was not
strong, and as years advanced she
imagined herself growing more and more
delicate, till at last she took to her bed.
where she afterward remained In daily
expectation of death. Her nerves were
very delicate, and Id my school days the
schoolmaster used to warn us urchins to
keep quiet when going by her house, as
we might disturb her if any noise was
made My youth and boyhood passed,
and with the coming Of manhood dis
covered that a young sister of the in.
valid was . very pretty, girl, and when,
after coming home from church or sing
ing school with her, an invitation to come
in was given, it was always accepted. The
short and awkward visits made at first
soon gave place to the old-fashioned sit
ting up. One evening several of the young
people came in, and the talk and laugh.
ter grew hilarious. Il 1t was checked in.
stantly by aheavy, thump on, the floor in
the room directly overhead, where the
sick woman lay. Zone warning was
enough, but the frequently Of the same
signal afterward tended to lessen oul
respect for it. 1t seems that she kept 8
big cane at the side of her bed, and by
rapping with II she indicated her wants
and her displeasure. Finally one night,
after being cautioned several times in the
usual manner without effect, the parlor
door opened suddenly upon the assem-
bled party, and the bed-ridden woman
stood before our eyes holding the awful
cane in hand. It was the first time she
had moved in twenty years. Her en-.
trance was so sudden that she was able
to give two or three singing blows tC
those sitting near her before an escape
could be made. In moment shout
of laughter went up, and the supposed
invalid was not slow in finding that she
was the cause. Her mother and sister
fixed her up with suitable clothes, and
she spent the remainder of the evening
downstairs, and the day following she
went about the family housework. !
didn't marry the girl whom | courted
under such adverse circumstances. She
in time married and went to Massachu-
sets; and it was only last week that ]
saw the once invalid woman walking as
briskly about as any person of eighty
seven could be expected to do" b.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
IIII y Ut y Jill "II-IT- jill - "
New Mode Of Treating Tomatoes.

My practice is to eKcavate in the early
spring time as many fiat turnips as ART
needed and having filled the cavity witt
earth. plant two or three seeds in it
selecting the best plant, when two inch.
es or three inches high, to remain
and pulling out the others; when it il
{ time to set them in. the garden. place
! the turnip, with its contents undisturbed.
Z in q hole deep enough to cover the tlr
nip two inches or three inches. Setting
out in this way, there is no cutting away
of the roots and little need of water, a
the plant has not been in the least dis
turbed, especially if Injured to the ali
out of doors for week or two before be.
ing set in the garden. hge started
tomatoes out so early that the plant.
were in blossom, several dayEbefore be.
ing set otit, not being at alfehscksd OF
retarded in growth thereby EhcdMber'
startsstin the same way hate. lad Il
bloom when set out with the same RESULT
sAftsr icing pat in the ground the tur.
nip soon decays. furnishing . litte food
for the plant. If the turnips are to be
kept long In the house before setting out.
it will be well to put them in boxes, filling
the interstices with moss, sand Tor earth.
Kept moist, as too long exposure to the
hot sir Of a warm place viii cause the
turl1ips to wilt earth in which must
be kept moist. whether the trnip is in
! ole out Of 3 box. Anotherp66t is thai
instead Of being at the trouble of procur.
ing sharpenlsgs land setting stakes, and
pulling and taking care of them at the
end of the season, l started into growth
some sunfower seeds. To prevent toe
much shade / cut off the leaves of the
sunfiower as ia: above the tomato plant
as is necessary to give it all the air ahd
sunlight desirable. The Russian sun.
foHef, because of its very tall growth.
is de best for this purpose. The sum.
slower makes the best and most profit.
! sble stake, because it is 50 easily OBJ,
.tained- noloosening in the ground q
= breaking of stakes when loaded with
and the seeds Of the flower, which
! are better than corn for poultry, abun.
adantly pay for all the time and labor in
caring for them. The leaves OF the sun
flower also make good fodder. The
Russian sunfower also makes an excel,
lent bean pole, though tits not necessary
to start them so early as for tomatoes.
as growth of one and one. half feet BY
the end Of June. (bean-p planting time) is
all that is needed.-Cor. Country Gentle.
man.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
Unconscious Brain.Wofk.

! Wordsworth has testified that his best
poetry was created by allowing his
mind 10 direct itselfintently upon all the
phases of his subject, and then waiting
for spontaneous outflow of poetical
imagery from his mental mechanism.
Mozart, whose musical faculty had from
childhood been trained with most assidu-
Gus care, had only to!lthink ont the
general Plan of a composition. deciding
a. to the place to be given to solo, reci-
tation, duet, quartette, etc. and then al
low his thought to work Of itself and
evolve its own results In the same way
trained .mathematiciaDs solve difficult
problems. But most instruetiye LOT all
Is, the action Of memory We endeavor
to recall some half-forgotten fact, name,
or date. After fixing the attention upon
the subject for . ceftain length Of time,
and recalling every accessible circum-
stance. we lind it better to withdraw the
attention, TO s'hang up. the subject,
and leave the matter to time The
general result win be sudden return OF
the missing fsct TO the consciousness.
IN all these cases Of "unconscious eere-
bration," II i noteworthy that we must
first give direction to the process, ana,
moreover, that in order TO obtain results
we must previously train the automata.
-Lectureb By ~. Carpenser. ,1-'' 81
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

lit is afact not generally known that
steam is kept up in the halls and CORR
dors of the Grand UpioR Hetsl Sara
toga. all winter and thu mammoth hotel
aired daily This is done fer the pres
ervation Of the furniture and to prevent
the formation Of those odorsi which are
ineradicable when once they find iodge
mentin a hotel.-M r Times, s., /,
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

AN original idea is that of the Mis-
souri, apiarist, who took carload OF
hived bees to Florida. He expected them
to make honey all winter, and hoped to
return to his Missouri home in the spring
1t least 81 900 richer than he was. ~
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

The boss pension agent has turned
up in Natchez. He secured negro
widow pension Of $1,000 and handed
his fen. o. Picayune.l L lsl = q >.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

Henry Carpenter, Of Bowling Green,
KY, who had his skull fractured, his leg
smashed and his neck broken by "A acct
dent, last summer, has resumed his farm
ing operations. 4, B. I'D 'sLisEs,Si :
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

,-Forty-three old maids held . con-
vention near Toronto few days ago and
discussed the question Of the best means
Of extricating themselves from their for
lorn condition. Not one iota of an ink
ling of their hsinous designs upon male
humanity has been allowed to escape
them Toronto Globe. ala :. a.aid >
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

-Expenence is q high-grade school
course thorough, tuition free-but Incl.
dental expenses enormous. "a -
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09
. = ~ nepso,s doomed. to, exsrlassing

!. For persons doomed, to- everlasting
ridicule On ACCOUNT, Of diminntiyeness
Of stature-for the '.sawed-ofIs." the
ss.shorties's snd the .'snits' 81 society
the Louisville CouriestJ oss,sSs kindly
comes to the front with tAese cheering
words: "Ia war the lttla man il net.
perhaps, to be feared; bnt, in love look
out for the quiet. unobtrusive gentleman
whose coat-tails nearly approximate tha
earth" .batofleah Tis1it
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09

'h AThewedding Of Isaac W. Sprague.
the fortyspound- living skeleton Of the
New York Museum, to Miss Minnie
Johnson, Of 160 ayoirdupois pounds, has
created sensation at Rockland, Vt,
where Mr.. ASprague already has wife
those term Of office has notyet expired.
VIII these two women hsye to fight as
dogs do for this bones-Mi X. Grqpaic.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-09


termined by experiment. 80.
Considerable Improvement has been
made in wheat during the past few
wears, but there is room for a greater
advance as the larger proportion OF our
common varieties produce taller stems
and more leaves than is necessary for
the perfection of the small amount of
grain they yield. i This is shown in the
dwarf sorts seen in the dry regions of
the far west, where from forty to sixty
bushels per acre are not uncommon, and
where the wheat straw will. scarcely
reach two feet in length, counting head
and all. Tall corn and tall grain may
be well enough to look at and talk about,
but unless accompanied by q proportion
ate amount of grain. they are less profit
able than the medium or dwarf sorts.
This rule holds good throughout the
entire list of farm crops. and every
farmer should look to these points in the
habits of the plants he cultivates. The
addition Of two kernels Of wheat to every
head in an acre would make marked
addition to the total yield. Lengthen the
cara of corn on an acre one inch. and it
would add ten bushels to the yield Of tour
ordinary varieties. It is these slight adj
ditions, widely distributed, that count in
making up the sum total Of our crops. :
1t is not only the leading or principal
crops that should b improved. but beans,
peas, and generally al field and garden
vegetables are worthy Of the most care
full attention. II q farmer can add one
pod of beans to- stalk, il will be . salts