Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1883-03-08
YOUNG FOOLS THAT MARRY.

YOUNG FOOLS THAT MARRY.
These sparkers are looked upon by
parents generally as nuisance. and
often they are right. Nine-tenths of
the sparkling is done by boys who
haven't got their growth, and they
look so green that it is laughable for
the old folks to look at them. They
haven't generally got second shirt.
and they are no more qualified to get
married then n COW is to preach And
yet marrying is the first thing they
think of. A green boy without dol
lar present or prospective, sparkling
girl regularly and talking about
marriage, is II spectacle for the gods
and man He should be reasoned
he is able to support wife, and to
know whom he loves, and the differ
ence between love and passion, he
should he quoroutiued or put IN n
convent, erected on purpose for such
cases. Nine tenths of the unhappy
marriages are the result of green,
human beings allowed to run at large
in the society pasture without any
yokes on them. They marry and
have children before they do mou-
staches; they are fathers of twins be-
fore they are the proprietor Of two
pair of pants and tic little girls they
marry are old women before they are
twenty years old. Occasionally one
of these gosling marriages turns out
all right bat II is II clear case of luck
If there WAS a law against young "a
loots sparkling and marrying before
they have all Of their teeth cut, we sup
pose the little cuses would evade it
in some way, bat ther. ought TO be a
sentiment against il. IL is time
enough for these bautana 10 tAink oi
| iiA"ing Il pullet when they have raised
money enough 10y their own work to
buy bundle OF laths to build hen
house. But they see girl who looks
| cunning, and they are afraid there
are not going TO be girls enough to go
round, and then they begin TO get t.
work real spry; and before they
are aware of the sanctity OF the mar
riage relation they are hitched for lie,
and before they own cook stove or n
bedstead they have to get up in the
night and go after the doctor so fright
ened that they run themS, Ives out of
breath and abuse the doctor because
he does not run too; and when the
docter gets there he finds that there
is'uot linen enough la tlIo ho,."~
wrap up doll baby. 1t is at abou;
this time that n yOungs man begins to
| realize that lie has been colossal fool,
and as lie flies around 10 heat water
and bring in the bath tub and goes
whooping after his mother or her
mother he turns pale around his gills.
his hair turns red in a single night,
and he calls high heaven TO witness
that if he lives till morning, which he
has doubts about he will turn over
new leaf and never get married till he
| is older. And in the morning the
green-looking father" is around be
fore drug store is open, with no col
lar on, his hair sticking every way, his
eyes blood-shot and his frame nervous.
waiting for the clerk to open the door
so he can get some saffron to make tea
of Less than year-ago he thought
he was the greatest man there was any
where, but as he sits there in the house
that morning, with his wedding coat
rusty and shiny, and his pants frayed
at the bottom. and coat patched at
the elbow. and the nurse puts i'm his
arms n little roll of flannel with a
baby hip in it, he holds il as he would
Il banana. and as he looks at his girl
wife on the bed nearly dead from pain
and exhaustion, and he thinks there is
not provisions enough i'm the house to
feed a canary, "a lump comes into his
throat and he says to himself that if
he had it to do over he would leave
that little girl at home to grow up
with her mother, and he would wait
till lie had six dollars to buy baby fan
mel pnd ten dollars to pay u Doctor
Exchange.