Middletown transcript., 1883-02-23

thirty hands from the bar to the rail
way track, but is handled no less thar
los times. Such is simple account o.
tin plate making.
A NEWLY MARRIED COUPLE.
4 gentleman just in from Western
trip gives a very laughable account Of
a newly married couple who boarded
the train at way station. He says az
the train drew up to the station the
whole car was aroused by the unusual
din, the noisy farewells. Wish yoU
much Joys" and repeated kissings of q
jovial crowd of young folks.
The newly married couple, arrayed
in wedding costumes, and evidently
fresh from the final service, took seats
in the centre of the car, and were al
once the attraction. In a very few
moments both the bride and groom
gave evidence that there was some
more overpowering agencies than love
at work in their systems. The groom
turned over a seat in front, and ele-
waited his pedals he put his arm mod
estly upon the back Of the seat, while
the air from the window foated the
white vail and the flavor of orange
blossoms over his face. But something
was on his mind, and he momentarily
grew more restless, and twisted and
squirmed in all manner of ways. The
bride, too, seemed to have the same
SYMPTOMS. She tried the easiest atti-
tudes, now with her head lovingly on
his manly shoulder, then suddenly
arousing and looking uneasily from the
window, as if in expectancy of disaster,
or that she would meet the froWn of an
angry father.
Suddenly, when all eyes were at
tracted to the couple, the groom, eyi-
IDENTIFY receiving a new and deeper
twinge, with misery depicted on every
feature of his face, lifted his right leg,
and began tugging at a new boot which
some wicked shoemaker had inveigled
him into buying as a perfect ft.-
After pulls and tugs which made the
veins stand out on his face, and the
arteries on his neck throb like a small
steam engine, he succeeded in releasing
his foot, and a sense of happiness stole
across his manly face. The bride sur
veyed the smile but it only seemed to
increase her misery. She wiggled and
famed, and finally in her desperation
she attacked the buttons of her new
shoes with as much vigor as her lord
did his boots, and one by one they
dropped upon the floor.
Both sets Of feet were placed in proX-
unity upon the overturned seat, and
the BRIDES shawl hid them from the
vulgar gaze. The bonnet was unlim-
bered from its pedestal, and the blush
ing bride dropped easily upon the
shoulder of her husband, and securely
slept, as the train whistled and stopped
and started. The passengers, relieved
of anxiety, had settled to cat maps and
newspapers and peanuts, when long
whistle was followed by the brakeman
putting his head in at the door and
yelling, "Cresson.n
EGreat Jerusalem, Julia ! wake up |!
here we are," shouted the bridegroom;
and there's them internal boots ~
He jumped at them, and tugged and
sweat and swore, but those feet had
actually grown about an inch, and it
was no go. The station was reached,
when only one foot was stuck half way
in the leg. The fair Julia had encased
her pedals slip-shod, and as time and
tide'' and railroad trains "wait for no
man" they gathered their traps, and
went out just as they were, without
one plea, p" to meet the crowd of friends
assembled to meet the newly welded
pair. As the train started, the brake
man came into the car remarking,
tell you, the boys at the depot are hav-
ing fun over that couple We are
expecting every day to hear of the sud
den death of that shoemaker, and to
see the jury bring in a verdict of justi-
fable homicide Exchange.