Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1883-06-08

1.-THE PROBLEM.
A monarch wise; two ladies fair;
youth not blessed with rank or money,
A Royal Tiger from his lair;
These are our drdmutts pcrSOnU.
Tho King was greatl That potentate
Full wisely steered the ship of State;
And, most of all, his shrewdness showed
In his Majestic Penal Code.
An amphitheater, nobly used,
Served as a court where each accused
BY his own act strict justice got;
Or twas MS fault II he did not,
The cuprit, real Or supposed,
Was placed before two portals, closed;
Then, uncontrolled, self.guided quite
He took his choice 'twixt left and right.
Behind the one, IN wait for him,
A tiger lurked, severe and grim.
The other hid n lovely maid,
Young, rich, for wedlock all arrayed.
Which door to open2 Death or life2
A beast of preyl A lawful wifel
No wonder IL he gasped and tarried
We ali do when we er killed-or married.
The trial, from its institution,
Down to the final execution
Not having any lawyers In ib,
Took just the space Of hdU minute.
In this grand scheme of penal laws
So free from doubt, delay, excitement-
Each of the tigers separate claws
Was a" separate clause in the Indictment
Said we not well this King was shrewd
Who this strong, simple plan pursuedp
The crowd amused-Law vindicated-
The tigers fed-the maidens matedl
The Kings own daughters inclination
Was toward q youth of lowly station,
And since he was like Barkis willin',"
He must have been a hardened villain.
So the police pursued him, caught him,
And to the Colosseum brought him;
And thither came tho monarch proud,
The Princess and the baser crowd.
Behind the scenes another maiden
Attends, with all her gewgaws laden.
While close at hand, to left-or right
The tger-with his appetite.
The throng now see the culprit enter
And pause at tho arenas center;
Turn, face the royal box, and bow;
AlasI How feels the Princess now2
She only, favored by the Fates
Knows the dread problem of the gates
Which hides her rivals hateful face,
Her luckless lover vainly tries
To read her secret in her eyes.
What sign can reach his straining sight2
She lifts one lily hand-the right!
He sees the sign; he must obey;
He bows again and turns away;
Faces the double-gated wall,
Advances firmly, and-thats ALL
Right here the story halts. The sequel
Its author left with chances equal.
Did Love decree the youths survival,
Although united to rival?
1.-THE SOLUTION.
This tiger, savage sleek and strong,
Had tasted there alone and long,
And grown to be far hungrfer than n
Wild quadrupedal Doctor Tanner.
He shifted the wall that did divide
Him from the maid on t'other side.
One sniff two sniffs, three sniffs were all;
Then he forthwith tore doicn The tpdu.
Sir Tiger now has had his fill;
Another pound would make him I'LL.
He's no more need for persons raw
Than Barnum's tiger stuffed with straw.
Too long we've lot our hero stand
Since his fair Princess raised her hand.
Boldly he opes the right-hand portal
Then staggers back in terror mortal!
From out the gateway, crouching low,
The tiger steps, sedate and slow.
Stops, stoops, unsheathes and sheathes his
claws,
While all may note the awful paws!
He gives the youth scornful glance,
Aud passes on with looks askance.
He does not seem to care to eat him
Meets him, In fact, but doesn't meat him.
he Sm00thB his whfSkerS, walks the ring,
Winks at the Princess and her lover,
Then smiles serenely at the King
And scans the multitude all over.
His lordly form and bearing made
Fit setting for the part he played.
He on the sands of that theayter
From top to toe looked glad he ate her.
He peered and purred and paced awhile,
With that same soft, seductive smile,
Then to q shady corner crept
And laid him down and sweetly slept.
The King in this portent sees.
Quoth he, while quake the royal knees:
go, daughter, quickly as you can
And wed that praiseworthy young man."
The Princess trips across the sands
To where her lover, waiting, stands.
They're married fast, mid cheers and laughter,
And then-live happy ever after.
Oft did the swain In later life
Demand the secret from his wife;
And by all arts 6trove to oblige her
To tell tchtch door had hid the tiger.
But she, as ali historians say,
Kept silent to her dying day:
So no step further ever made he
To solve the problem "Death or Lady"
~The z is soft here.