The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-04-13

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A Discreet Conductor.
81 understand you have made an APP
plication to be placed in charge of a
train ON another division of the road,
said newspaper man to Conductor
Rumsey, the other evening. "Theboy
say it IS too lively for you up around
Waupun. How is it?''
mo, sir,'' saws Rumsev, with a
mad look on his face. 1T is all lie.
/ shall stay on that road as long as
they want me; and you fellows want
to have your passes with you when you
strike my train, or you have to put up.
The boys all have to come down and
see me with passes or tickets or money,
and don't you make no mistake. You
want your thick-soled shoes on, or you
get corns.
s'But what was it about some fellow
chasing you out of the coach into the
baggage car, and you locking the door
and not coming out till the man got off.
Any truth in that?" said the newspaper
man, as he took a cigar out of Rumsey's
vest pocket, and lit it.
"Well, you hain't got noegall, either.
What you want is to go into slaughter
house somewhere and get some gall. :"
and he looked down at his empty cigar
pocket. "Naw, there didn't anybody
scare me. The boys tell everything on
me, because / am good-natured, and
don't kick. 1t is because am otpick-
ing fight all the time. ammo fighter,
and had rather stop a train and build
a track around man that wants to
fight, than towhip him. Some of these
sheriffs and constables that travel
around after prisoners, or take them to
Waupun, think a conductor is a regular
deputy sheriff. I am no Pinkerton The
other day a big husky fellow opened his
coat and showed star on his vest as
big as the ones these Milwaukee alder
men wear, and said to me: want you
to help me up the road here piece. 1
expect couple of horse-thieves to get
on, and they may be too much for me.
/ told him I hadn't lost any horse-thief,
and when the fuss commenced he could
find me turning back summersault off
the hind end of the train. S'poseI am
going to pull sand-baggers and horse
thieves for eighty dollars a month, and
have bullets shot in my stomach. Not
much. A sheriff from Nebraska wanted
me to lay off one day and 90 to Ran
dolph and help him arrest Polk Wells
and his gang, two years ago. You re-
member how everybody got shot full of
holes that time. Revolvers just laid
right down on the floor and went off
themselves. Not any Polk Wells bust
ness for me. Some of these sheriffs
that take prisoners to Waupun think a
conductor is going to sit right down and
watch prisoners all the way A fellow
wanted me to hold q big prize-fghter
he was taking to Waupun, with hand
cuffs on, while he went out at Horizon
and got drink | told him guessed
not much Mary Ann, and he said I
didn't have any sand. Well, / have got
lust enough to run my business and col
lect my fares, and if I want any sand
baggingI will quit railroading and run
for constable. Why, they wanted me to
stop a train once and go with them to a
barn about mile away from the track
and hunt for some prisoners that es-
capped from the penitentiary. Did / gop
Well, / haven't got my memorandum
with me, but if Irecollect right, I didn' t
go. Take me for a detechyep"
"Then you rather incline to a quiet
life, and had rather get along without
any fuss" said the newspaper man, as
he asked Rumsey for match to light
the cigar. aS 1913
4" Match Well, Iguess better light
it for you, and pay you for smoking it.
O, wait till | catch you on my train
without your pass, and I will make up
for cigars and matches, liftingyou off the
| platform with leather. Yes, sir, / be-
lieve the ugliest man that ever got on a
train can be made peaceable by kind
ness, ! had a man on my train one
night going up, that always gets drunk
on purpose for a row. He has cleaned
out lots of trains, and I see he was in
for a row. He looked as though hehad
q hot box when he saw me come in the
door, and grated his teeth. He was
full, boiling over, and expected
to fight to the next station, where he
lived, and get off without paying. L
went up to him, and sat down beside
him, and asked him if he had had a
good time to-day, and then pulled
out some picture cards that I got
in store here in Milwaukee, and I said:
Here, Pat, take these pictures to your
little girl at home, and tell her, as she
meets you at the door and throws her
arms around your neck, and kisses you,
and says she is glad you come home
sober, and that she loves you, and that
you are the dearest papa in the world,
tell her that old Rumsey sent them to
her with kiss Well, YOU wouldn't
believe it, but before i got half through
talking about the little girl, the big
tears came to his eyes, and rolled down
his red face, and he took them, and
thanked me in a choking voice, and
said, as he pulled out five-dollar bill:
Take my fare ont of this, Rumsey, and
God bless YOU I'll bet that rough fell
lows heart was touched, because when
he got off at the next station he was
/ sober, and was wiping his eyes on his
coat sleeve, and he pointed right straight
for home. 0, aman can get in his work
ron railroad train, and never kill a
man, If he wants to. ought to have
been a sister of charity instead of a con-
] ductor, know that, but now / am into
/ It'll am going to stick. ''-Peck's Sun
NJ