Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-08-22
Nhilnsfs and Hol-Ohe-No

tine morning last week Secretary
Chandler was observed TO rush down
he steps of the Navy Department and
make Il bec,.ine for the White House,
holding a telegram in his hand. The
President. who WAS having the lin
.shing curl put TO his whiskcrs. observed
aim coming, and knowing that some
hing had happened, proceeded with as
much haste as Presidential dignity per-
a,its down stairs. Secretary Chandler
net him at the door AMI rushed into the
Blue Room followed by the President
What 10 You think of that, Mr.. Presl-
ient?" he gasped as he handed the yell
low slip 10 him.. The President read 1t
with a darkening brow and a blanchln2
check. 1t was from Commander Ner-
riman, of the Adams, now in Alaska.
1t read thus: The Cnilcats are indlg-
nant and refuse to make any hoo-che-
moo" .'aGfuSe to make any hoo-chc-
moo, d they?' howled the Secretary,
charging around. I'm banked Ii
know who the ChilcatS are or what hoo
cha-noo is, but banked if they shan't
make it, ~ sute rs my uane. is William
+. Chandler BEG your pardon, Mr..
! President But what are you going to
do about it. Mr.. SeoTstary?' asked the
President. shall issue an Executive
proclamation commanding all good citi-
Zens in Alaska to maSa hoN-che-no0
/ right away? Or I'll send Che Iallap2o-
SO down there TO get aground and make
| them pull her Off, or the Alarm with her
! 800, 900 steam steering gear that won /
work The Alarm can't go" glCn1ni-
! " responded the Secretary, "because
| she ,vaais y liver-pad ON her condenser
! ana a porous :, rs. e! in her donkey en-
! CINE. to sag uuthin., 81 the shja-PlasterS
She needs all the time Resides, she
turr"G bott"m upward the other day
who'll har steanl-a,oecing gear got to
work and all the officers clothes have
got to be washed, Bat the BANKED
| hoo-che-noo, I'll lind out hoo-chc-noo
before she knows it herself" And
the Chiicats?N marmurei the President.
"Oh, that's easy enough responded
William. II have Just got.to 60 down
40 the chronological Bureau Of the An.
thropoligical Society and they have dead
loads of Chiiaat@ down there. It's a
Fur-bearing ANIMAL.
Bat thought you said, meet1ly in
terposed the President. "that you We're
nos going To be fur-bearin9 with them?
II don't know what | said Mr.. Pres
ident, Snapped Chandler, highly ir.l-
tated but mean TO get at the bottom
OF this hoo-che-noo business if ii cost.
me- my portfolio"
Lets oct the dictionary" suggested
the President. Four livered tiunkies
entered with an armful Of dictionaries
"You take Worcester and I'll take Web
| ~ tn ,lt1f Z, !,
Chandler agreed.
No hoo-che-noo was to be found. bu
Chilcat w;ss. 1t was tribe OF lndian
in Alaska.
"You said they were fur-@earing AMI
mails rcproachfuliy remarked tn
President.
well, so did" said Chandler, look
ing father sheepish. ''but II seems to m
that that highly ligurativc Vest told M
So"
III were you," said the Prcsidcn,
II shouldn't believe all Senator Vest
warns. Vest, YOU see, is subject TO hal
lncnations-about fish he has caught
and SO ON, and he has several times toll
me THINGS that | woudn' tt couldn
have believed if anybody but Vest ha
+, told me. But hoo-che-noo - suppo'
you inquire if there is q hoo-che-noo
the Patent Olfice?' Accordingly tt
Secretary trotted off to the Patent Oiiic
the Postollice aud the Tension Oflic
u all to no avail, but when he reached IL
: Navy Department, wearied and discou
aged, there, from the very first point
I observation, the solution was had. III
|. Chilcats are dwellers in Alaska and no
che-noo is u liqn;1 possessing some
r. the charms of Kentucky bourbon, an
the Chilcats had notified Command
Merriman that if he did not do som
thing or other :hcy would continue
hold the hoo-che-noo in bond Until som
body arrived or something happene
mi The President, who expected to toss
~ his sleepless couch tortured with
mystery of ho6-che-noo, did not lose q
wink Of sleep. Cor. N. 7. Wertd.