The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1883-10-25
Another Rib Broke.

/
A queer case has just come to light in
Chicago. A young man spent an even
inc with his girl, and during the evening
while the family was present in the par
| lor, he was rs demure, and bland, and
| childlike as could be wished. The
mother came into the room, after the
family had retired, to get handker-
chief she had left, and the young man
was seated in chair in the middle of
the room, while the girl was seated on
n sofa, and nothing that the mother
could see, in the actions of either, led
her to think they were more than pass
ing acquaintance, 1t seemed to her as
/ though the young people had met be-
| fore, but there was no evidence that
they were very well acquainted. All
night, after he had gone, the girl COM
planned of a pain in her side, and in the
| morning doctor was called, and he
found that two of the girls ribs were
broken How it was done, nobody
knew. The girl could not tell for the
life of her, though she blushed when
asked about it, and the mother looked
very wise as she looked at the doctor.
The doctor made inquiries, set the ribs
and went away, and the girl proceeded
TO recover. That evening the young
man called and was astonished when
informed of the extent OF the girls in
juries, and wondered how it could have
happened, though the mother watched
his face closely as he spoke, and de-
tected not only blush, but profuse
perspiraton on his face, She had been
u girl once herself, and though she had
never had any ribs broken she had been
Rugged some, 1t was trying position
for all of them. The father was away
on a trip to Wisconsin, and when he
came home the matter had to be eX-
planned to him. He was tod that the
ribs just simply broke themselves, and
that neither the mother, nor the girl,
nor the young man could account for it,
and yet all three of them blushed terri
bly,. The father patted his girl on the
head, told her she would be better when
she got over it, and then called the
young man into the library. The young
man was so weak he could hardly walk,
and when he sat down he took out a
handkerchief and mopped his brow,and
wished he was dead, The father looked
| the young man over, and was sorry, He
finally said;
Young man, guess | can give you
some points on hugging. You must
first learn that girl is not constructed
on the same principle of an iron fence
or a truss bridge. A girl is delicate
piece of mechanism, like fine watch,
full of little springs wheels, jewels, etc.
The breaking OF any one Of these would
cause her to cease keeping time, and
necessitate her being taken to jeweler
for repairs. In hugging girl YOU
don't want to 90 at it as if you were
raking and binding, or catching stur.
geon. know that where the family
sits up late, with young couple, and
spoils several precious hours of hug
ging, that unless the young man has a
good head, when left alone with the OBJ
ject OF his affection, that he is liable to
oyerdo the matter and try to make up
for lost time. He seems to want to hug
up o. lot ahead, and grabs the girl as
though he wanted to break her in two
This is wrong You should 90 at it
calmly and deliberately, even prayer
fully, and be as gentle as though she
was an ivory fan. The gentle pressure
OF the hand that girl loves, even the
touch, is as dear to her as though you
run her through stone-crusher. You
should not grab her as you would bag
Of oats, and leave marks on her that
will last a lifetime A loving woman
should not be made to feel that her
life is in danger unless she wears a cor
set made of boiler iron. hope this will
be lesson to you, and hereafter, If you
cannot control your feelings, will pro-
vide wooden Indian for YOU to prac-
tice on at first, until you have developed
your muscle, and got tired, and then we
can turn our daughter loose in room
with ouand not feel that it is necessary
to keep a surgeon handy. In allowing
you to keep company with my daugh-
ter, | do not agree TO provide YOU with
human gymnasium, dressed in n
mother Hubbard wrapper, and wearing
bangs. You can readily see that girl
would not last season through il she
had to have ribs set once week.
Please think this thing over, and if
the girl is well enough next Sunday you
can drop in and Try some more ribs.
Now YOU 90 homo and hug hat rack
Tor an hour or two, and have it repaired
in the morning.
Inc young man went out into the
night air took his hat of TO cool his
head, and hired n man TO kick him. 49,
Pecky sun,
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