Mexico weekly ledger., 1883-10-11
MIR. Jones Rnltsts ss Coek.

Il
perience lately. 1t came suddenly,
like the toothaehe, and it left the
same sort of indellible impression.
The truth is, he has been acting
as cook. At first he thought he knew
as much as whole intelligence off,
Ger, and he told Mrs. Jones SO when
she informed him that Bridget was
going away for two weeks to visit her
sister at East Saginaw. 2
1--WE must have supply. Jeptha, y
she said in ministerial sort OF way.
81 have all can do with the chill
dren and the fall sewing, without
doing any cooking"
Nonsense, retorted Jones sssup-
ply be blamed! Who wants a strange
girl rummaging through the house?
I'll do the cooking, Mariai can
cook better than any woman I ever
saw. Ever eat any Of my ginger
bread?''
mo, never want to-" snapped
Mrs. Jones. 81 never saw q man
that could cook anything decently
yet .
swell, you'll see one now. Let
me get up in the morning and get the
breakfast. I'll show you bill Of
fare" !" boasted Jones.
The morning came and Jones got
tup early and slipped softly down
stairs, intending to get breakfast,
ready and give Maria q surprise.
And be did. When the breakfast
bell rang she went down and stopped
in the doorway to feast her eyes.
Jones had laid the table with Bridg-
cts ironing-sheet, and he was rush.
ing about in his shirt sleeves, with
flying suspenders and red and heat
ed countenance. piling up dishes
wherever there was an empty space
ON the scorched cotton spread.
''Are We all left-handed,'' asked
Willie, as he called his mas atten-
ton to the knives and forks on the
wrong side of the plates.
"Hush up!" said the father, se-
verely. "Sit down, Maria, and turn
the coffee. What are you staring at ?''
II was admiring the cook,'' said
Mrs Jones, swallowing pin in her
attempt not to laugh, and she grave
ly turned q cup of clear hot water
out of the coffee-pot.
'sMust have forgot the Coffee"
mumbled Jones; accidents will
happen in the best of families. Try
the oatmeal
"Did you--pth?- -thrw-pth-st
boil it?' asked Mrs. Jones, as she
slowly choked to death.
DO you Doll oatmeal porridge!
inquired Jones, anxIously; "Pm
sure my mother never cooked hers. {"
1''No!" said Mrs. Jones, Innocent
ly; t'then she must have had her
throat lined with porcelain. What
are these things, Jeptha?''
''Saratoga chips, Maria; don't you
know potatoes when you see them?"
"Oh! 1 suppose those are what
you call aw natural. I see you for
got to peel the potatoes before you
fried them purred Mrs. j.
when did Bridget say she would
be back?" asked Jones, changing the
conversation.
"Why, she has hardly got there
yet," answered his wife. s'She
won't be back for two weeks unless
her brother Tim comes.''
| Jones sighed, and went down
town, where he dined at several res
taurants. 1t took Mrs Jones all day
at hard work to get the kitchen back
to its normal condition, and at night
j there was very light supper. Jones
announced that he would have ONE
| let and hot biscuit for breakfast, and
retired early.
| In the morning he was sleeping
lsweetly when Mrs. Jones delivered
a red-hot shot into his nearest ear.
st"Jeptha," she whispered hoarscly,
"there e's-the-ire!"
| ''Where?" shrieked Jones, sliding
out of bed and into his clothes.
"In-the-kitchen," replied Mrs.
J. rolling over into sound sleep.
Jones flew to the nearest box and
turned in an alarm, and by the time
he got back to the kitchen and had
torn up the whole interior he discov,
cred his mistake and tried to ap.
, tpease the fury of the disappointed
fire department by promising to sci
'em up later. Then he took an ar
lnica bath and went to bed for q
, week a'sl
; Bridget had just reached East Sag
linaw and been duly installed as best
; guest at her sisters, Mrs. Ma1oney
| when messenger appeared.
II "Howly Moses, it's tellygram,'
, she agasped, ''phat's broken loost
npwi" 1t readl
i "Your brother Tim has arrived
) hurry back at once"
i When Bridget had redeemed th'
/. kitchen from its two days spree, sh'
, began to look for Tim; she hasn'
y seen him yet, but as she says
"Thcre's the Tallygram," Jones toll
her to say nothing as he might hav
been taken for suspect. What b
knows he keeps to himself.-Detrpi
Post and Tribune.
4 tt Ia n ouestion III summer yaca