The Evening critic., 1883-06-21
COLONEL oCHILTREE ABROAD.
His Own Account of His Adventures
With q Dude in % London Omuf.

With Dude in % London Omnf.
bus.
Colonel Thomas Ochiltree had scarcely
landed on English soil before he undertook to
redress personal grievances by taking the law
into his own hands. copy of the London
GLOBE of June has been received, which con.
tains communication from Colonel Ochiltree
describing in his own language the circum.
stances Of the afrair referred to-:
"lo Me Editor Of the Giobe-SIR: desire
to call attention to a horrible and dangerous
practice OF Englishmen in general OF always
carrying their canes and umbrellas with the
point extending upward thus causing NOT
only much annoyance, but considerable dode.
Ing and nervousness on the part of the victim
wnoee face and eyes are in near con.
In getting into q bus or railway Carriage Will
always enter with the point OF his cane or
umbrella at an angle OF 45 degrees, extending
directly into the face Of the passengers.
Should sudden Jolt or start occur Soma
one Is sure to get 1t in dangerous proximity to
their face or eyes. he will also carry his cane
and SHOULD pedestrian, coming from an op.
posite direction, stop suddenly, he is sure 10
ger IL ID the face or eye.. Why cannot they
carry carry It as 1t is intended, with the handle
nrst2 Then, IL 1t does come in contact with
ones lace, no serious harm can happen. In
my native State-Texas-where neither um.
nreilas 81 nor canes are much used, We are not
up IN the dodging exercise. I have done SO
much OF the lodging here for the past few
days OF Sightseeing that made up my mind
would commence practical reform, and
clean out the first man whose UNI
brella point came in contact with
my face, or even near it,
Consequently, whom, yesterday morning, /
was riding in q bus down the Strand, one of
these do fellows, wearing an eye.glass
ana liked up regardless of expense, stopped
the bus and proceeded to get In with such an
air OF Importance, as II he had Just purchased
controlling interest in the outfit, and the in.
evitable umbrella point came directly for me.
l endeavored to dodge it. but 1t was too late.
and 1t caught me in the cheek. At the same
moment landed him one between the ewes.
and ne went the length of the bus dropping
INTO the road-both hatless and eye.glass.less.
islipped out after him and explained to him
mat ! was inaugurating reform, and thar
ne was the first man 1 had occasion
to-, TO demonstrate the workings of the
understanding Of tho matter into him with n
pile driver. He called me an 'American cad
whatever that is, and said he was going to
have me arrested; but told him that [ was the
offended party, and would have him arrested.
returned to the 'bus,' noticing that all the
umbrellas were 'pints down. A lot Of INV
friends here, cattle men from Texas say
they Will adopt my plan. II Engllshmen who
are we'll meaning will only second our EFFORTS
and knock any man forty feet who attempts to
get Into bus or railway carriage with point
extended, the abuse will be speedily re
formed. Mr.. Editor, you assist us. and call
attention 10 this glaring abuse.
"Yours respectfully, yICrIn
"Amertcan Exchange, 440 Strand, June o.