Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Anacortes, Wash. Ter.) 1882-1887, 1883-12-29
THE JONES FAMILY.
MI. Jones Has an Evening at Home With
His Unruly Brats.

"Maria," said Mr. Jones as he sal
and enjoyed an evening at home--k j.
cause he had no place else to go-"it
seems to me that on suspicious
occasion like this he looked
fondly at her-"as is Heaven and home
We're anonymous terms"
".Sin-onomous," corrected Mrs.
Jones, taking several pins and a ball OF
twine out of her mouth and placing a
patch on that part OF Willie's pants
where it would do the most good.
"Jephtha, why don't you read aloud
evenings, instead OF keeping all the
good things to yourself?'
"Is reading allowed?" asked Jones
innocently. 81 thought you preferred
to talk"
"Well, l do" snapped Mrs j., "when
| have somebody to talk to, which amt
very often"
w'll pead, )" exclaimed Jones, hurried
ly reversing the book he held in his
hand-'And it came to pass"
"Save that for Sunday, interrupted
Mrs. Jones. "Read some sweet thing
about home or the friends some poetry,
| love to hear you read poetry. Jephta,
with sly wink at nobody.
Thus encouraged, Jones, who is an
.amateur elocutionst and has fired the
neighborhood with his dramatic read
ings in times past, till the neighbors
threatened to fire him, seized volume
of poetry and, in the voice that made
"Freedom shrek when Kosciusco fell :"
read aloud that touching poem be-
ginning
(Which shall it be, which shall it be.
looked at John-vJ ohm looked at me-"
There was silence which could have
been felt with rolling-pin when Jones
ceased to read, and wiped the foam
fecks from his pallid lips, and Maria
was in tears.
81 know you've wakened the boys"
she said, in voice that sounded
small and still after his, "and they'll
want drink"
"The childrenn' murmured Jones
with fixed eyes, ''the dear, sweet
children! M-M-Maria, do we 'preciate
these dear ones as We ought TOP
al do" said Mrs. Jones, shortly. al
hear them talking now-where's my
slipper"
"No, Maria," returned Jones, whose
soul was melted within him by his
efforts in the line of elocution," L will
go and see ii the innocent darlings need
ANYTHING" And he went up stairs soft
ly, repeating with a Salvni-Rossi- Booth
effect:
(which shall it be, which shall it be?
looked at John John looked at me"
The .innoccnt darlings" heard him
coming and dessting from pillow
fight in which they We're engaged, they
buried their heads in the sheets and
were instantly sound asleep, looking
like dimpled cherubs, with an occa-
sional snore to assert their relation to
the human. Jones wiped the salt tears
of love and elocution from his eyes,
and bent fondly over them; then he
crept out and waited moment in
the hall to listen to their gentle breath
ing suddenly it ceased.
Then a dreadful suspicion haunted
Jones-they had been playing 'possum,
the little wretches he waited.
"Is the old man gomez" were the
words OF Cherub No. |, as soon as he
got the sheet out of his mouthr
eyes" answered Cherub No. 2, che
was a-crying, Willie. Ain'the duffer,
though?'
"Tll strike him for five cents to-
morrow; see ii don't"
"Oh, he'll be himself again tomorrow,
Willie; he'll stamp around and say,
Get out of my way, little imps, just as
he allus does. | don't take no stock in
him, don't"
"Let's play We was pa," suggested
Willie. "Where's them boys? PH
teach them to touch my paper! I'll
tan their hides for 'em! RI show 'em
who's master in this house"
When Jones got back to the sitting
room his face was red-very red-and
his eyes wore vengeiul glare. Mrs.
Jones looked up at him as he stalked in,
and asked innocently:
"Switch shall it be, switch shall it
be?"
"Both - shouted the enraged parent.
"Of all the unruly brats l ever saw, l
do think, Maria, ours are the worst.
I'll lather them both tomorrow.