The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1883-04-28
gelert STORY,
THE ODD-LOOKING MAN.
From Belg1'dria

1t is just thirty years to-day since we
were all seated at the table d hote Of a
fashionable hotel in Venice. we means
my father, mother, sister and myself. The
two former are long since departed this
life. My sister, a young lady travelling
for educational purposes, or, as old John
Dickens would have said, ito consolidate
her modern languages and music > is now
a wife and mother. | had just finished my
term at Oxford; and, as we all fancied we
should benefit by change Of air and scene,
we set out for a twelvemonth's continental
tour. In due season we reached Venice,
where | overheard the remark which sug-
gested the heading of the present article.
Our vis-a-vis was an English clergyman,
with his family, whom We then met for the
first time on our travels. The eldest
daughter, glancing stealthily at her oppo-
site neighbor, and with difficulty repressing
a smile, whispered audibly enough in her
fathers ear "What strange looking
young man that is facing us" Hereupon
paterfamilias, putting his quizzing glass
to his eye and staring deliberately at the
object of the remark, exclaimed emphati-
cally: "He is indeed an odd-looking fel-
low"
The victim of these unhattering obser-
vations was myself. [ have always been
what a cocllney would call "a rum un to
look at" Perhaps no other definition
would suit me as well. I am not, strictly
speaking, ''The Ugly Man, neither am [
s:The Lean Man" "The Fat Man, ''The
Short Man" or "The Tall Man" My
features, individually, are neither plain nor
unprepossessing. Yet the cnsemJle-ah !!
there is the rub There is Il screw loose
somewhere. Figuratively, the shoe pinches.
But had my misfortunes been confined to
general peculiarly of appearance, [ should
certainly have kept my own counsel, and,
so to speak, consumed my own smoke with
the pipe Of a philosopher. But it was far
more than this. Hereditary predisposition
had bequeathed to me three-fold idiosyn-
Grassy. Speech, person and nervous organ
ization were alike out Of tune. The early
consciousness of these failings rendered me
from childhood shy and sensitive to a de-
gree which more healthy constituted per-
sons could scarcely even imagine; as grew
to boyhood and youth these feelings be-
came more intensified, and when | had
reached my eighteenth year | was literally
unable to frequent places of public resort
and amusement, or even to enjoy quiet
walk, without undergoing positive torture
Ny friends failed not to misjudge me, and
attributed to me, most unjustly, a mOrose
and misanthropical disposition. | was
thus, by a sort of fatality, deprived Of the
natural sympathies and cousel of those
who were nearest and dearest to me. In
due season my school days, which had been
hourly torture TO me, whether in classroom
or playground, came to an end. Impelled
by natural ambition, and comp lying with
the wishes of my parents, | boldly resolved
to risk the ordeal of a university life, with
IA faint hope-Heaven save the mark of
eventually embracing the clerical profes-
sion. SO [ entered my name at a college,
and in due time presented myself for ma
circulation. Alas my amour propre was
destined, at the outset, to be rudely shaken.
CHANGING to encounter, beneath the gate
way of my college, merry group Of my
feliow-gownsmen, one of them, cycling me
askance, audibly expressed hope that
"that odd-looking fellow didn't intend to
come there" This was no fattering well
come, on the part of Alma Mater, to one
so sensitive and self-conscious as myself.
But worse still was to follow. While
undergoing the preliminary examination in
the college hall-of which, in point of
scholarship, I had little dread-one of my
felloY-F Freshmen remarked to his neighbor:
oGood heavens did you ever see such a
phiz?" This plunged the iron more deeply
still into my sore and stricken soul. 1t
capped the climax, as it WERE Within less
than week | was forced to leave my col
lege, and renounce all the fond and vain
hopes which my friends and myself had
built on my university career.
now became desperate, and threw my
self into various forms of solitary and un-
social dissipation Having Inherited, from
a distant relative, a small legacy to enable
me to follow some liberal career, | squan-
dered away the whole capital, on attaining
my majority, with insane recklessness.
Having thus reduced myself to the condi-
ton of the penniless prodigal, | gratefully
accepted the offer of accompanying my fam
lily abroad.
Byron tells us that foreign travel is the
strongest mental stimulus next to ambition.
Notwithstanding my repeated failures and
disappointments, L now clung to this last
forlorn hope of ridding myself, by strong
effort, seconded by the influence of novel
and striking scenes, of the incubus of self
consciousness. endeayored to counteract
my personal deficiencies by adopting various
modes of dress, which fancied most suit
able for the purpose, regardless of fashion
or expense, so long as | still had the family