Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1883-06-01
THE OLD-L0OKING MAN.

THE OLD-LuOhlNH MAN.
1t il lust thirty years to-day since we
were all seated at the table dhote of a
fashionable hotel in Venice. eve"
means my father, mother, sister and
self - c two former are long since de-
pared this life. My sister, a young lady
travelling for educational purposes, or,
~ old John Dickens would have said,
"to consolidate her modern Languages
and music" is now n vic and mother.
| had JUS finished my term5 at Oxford,
and, ms we all fancicd We should benefit
by change Of air and scene, we set out
fer a twelve months continental tour.
n duegcason we reached Venice, where
! overheard the remark which suggest
ed the heading OF the present article.
Our Wis a-vis was an English clergyman,
with his famiiy, whom we then met for
the first time on our travels. The eld-
est daughter, planClng steadily ut her
opposite ucighbJr, and with difficulty
REFRESHING Il smile, whispered audibly
enough in her fathers ear: "Wnat Il
strange-ooking young man that IS
facing US" Horeupon Paterlamilias,
putting his quiMing- Elass to his eye, and
staring deliberately at the object OF
the remark exclaimed EN- phauCally:
ole is indeed m odd-looking fellow"
The victim Of these unhltterng
observations was myself! have always
been what u coclIncy would call "a rum
I'm % look at" Perhaps no other dctinl-
tion would suit me as well. / am not,
strictly speaking, "Ihe Ugly Man, -
neither am | "rLe Lean Man." The
Fat Man." "Ihc Short Man." or The
Tall Man" My features, Individually,
arc neither plain nor unprcpossessing.
Yet the cnsemblG-ahl there is the rub!
There il n screw loosN somewhere!
FIgurauvcly, the shoe piuches. But had
my minGurtuuCs been confined to q
general popularity Of Appearance, |
should certainly have kept my own
counsel, and, 40 to speak, consumed my
own fmoke With th2 pipe Of Il philoso-
phcr. Bat it was far moro than this.
Hereditary predispositionhad bequeath-
I'D 60 me ~ a threcfoId iudiosyncrasy.
Spoeob, person and nervous organiZa-
ton were alike out Of tune. The early
consciousness Of these failIngs rendered
me, from childhood, shy and sensitive
to degree which more hCalLhily con-
stltuted persons should scarcely even
imagine; N | grew To boyhood ana
youth these feelings became more in
tcutihod, and when had reached my
eighteenth year, | was literally unable
to frequent places of public resort and
Amusement, or even To enjoy qdlet
daily walk, without undergoing positive
torture My friends failed not TO mis-
Judge me, and attribute TO me, most
uhiustly, II mOrusC and misanthrOpical
disposiuon, | was thus, by sort of
fatality, deprived of the natural sympa-
thies and counsel of those who were
nearest aud dearest 10 me. In due sea-.
SON, my school days, which had been
hourly torture to me, whether III Clase-
room or playground, came to an end.
lmpclloi by natural ambition, and COM
plying with tho wishes of my parents,
| boldly resolved to risk the ordeal of
"a university life, with faint hope
heaven save the mark--Of eventually
embracing the clerical profession. So !
entered my name ut II college, and in
due time presented myself for matricu-
latiUu. Alas! my amour propro WAS
destined, ut the outset, To be Iulcly
shaken. CHANGING 10 encounter, beneath
tho gateway of my college, merry
group of my ow-gownsmCn, one OF
them, cycling me askanco, audibly ex-
pressed q hope that chat odd looking
fellow didn't intend to come there"
This was no Hattering welcome, ON the
part of Alma Mater, to one 80 sensitive
and self conscious rs myself.
But worsc still To follow. While UNI
Z -,
in the college hall-of which, ii point
Of scholarship, had little dread-one
of my fellow freshmen remarked to his
nCighbor: Good heavens! did YOU
ever see such phig! This plunged
the iron more deeply still into my sore
and stricken soul. II capped the eli
max, as II were. Within less than a
week | was forced to leave my college
and ronouuce all the fond and vain
hopes which MY friends had built on
my university career.
now became desperate, and threw
myself into various forms of solitary
and uusocial dissipation. Having in
herited from n distant relative small
legacy 10 enable me- to follow some lib
eral career, squaudcIed away the
whole capital, on attaining my msjor-
ity, with insane recklessaess. Having
thus reduced myself to the condition
of the peuniless prodigal, l gratefully
accepted the Cfler of accompanying
my family abroad.
Byron tells us that foreign travel is
the strongest mental stimulus next to
ambition. Notwithstanding my re-
peatcd failures and disappointments,
now cluug to the last forlorn hope Of
Kidding myself, by strong fort, sec
onded by the influence OF noysl and
striking scenes, of the incumhus of
self-conciousuess. l endeavored to
counteract my personal deficiencies by
adopting various modes of dress, which
| fancied most suitable for the purpose,
regardless of fashion or expense, so
long as still had the family purse to
resort to. | studied my imperfect
euunciation for hours together in my
loom, and before my glass, fancying
myself comedian preparing for his
debut or an NJ, p. rehesrsing mis-
maiden speech. To combat my shy.
ness | consulted an experienced medi.
cal practitioner, to whom l fully de-
sciibed my normal symptoms, aud who
recommended NE to try colored spec
tscles. For what added to my confu.
sion was the fact that whenever people
CHANGED TO look st me, the nervous
twitohiRg and scared expression of my
eye naturally attracted their attention
and caused them to stare the harder
But it was all to no purpose; my fatal
lty still chung to me wherever l went
My voice, indeed, grew stronger ans
more emphatic under the severe train
ing of my Demosthenic exercises. Blu
It's inherent defects became proper
tionately more marked and offensive
My green or blue goggles-for 1 triet
every variety and shade of color-onl,