The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1883-07-14
dait and 9umor,
He Didn's Know.

A descendant of the ancient squatter
who, like his predecessor, has from earliest
recollection been living on lands whose
title is just about as genuine as the title OF
the average colonel, was SUMMONED before
court as a witness The old man had
heard great deal of courts, and how 1t
was the aim of lawyers to sketch afeller in
a lie and make fun of him." and he was
resolved not to allow himself to be dis
graced.
What is your name p asked the lawyer.
(Which one? I've got several.
''The one you sign
II don't sign none; | can't write.
is your name Peggleton
That's part of it. y
whats the other part Of it?"
':You guessed so we'll the first time, now
guess again.
''The summons says that your name Is
Josiah Peggleton; is that correct?"
II reckon it is.
"You have known the prisoner a long
time, [ understand
II never seed the prisoner before.
"Look out, sir, or you'll perjure your
solf 1t is we'll known that you have been
intimate with the man Jackson"
eyes, | know jackson mighty well. y
Thought you never met him before?'
II didn't say it. :"
ayes, you did. Your exact words were,
i never saw the prisoner before
II never did, for he wasn't prisoner
when | seed him.
"Ah very fine construction. See that
you continue to be so particular. Did
you see the quarrel between jackson and
Alrichs ?"
''No, sir; never seed it."
Look out, sir, look out Were you pres
ent when the two men quarreled and
fought?'
II was thar"
Thought you said that you didn't see
the-quarrel?"
Il didn't see it. I heard it.
'You are very exact. Well see how
far your analysis will serve you. [ I'M
derstand then that you heard the quarrel?'
II don't know"
Didn't you say that you heard it ?
eyes, but [ don't know what you I'M
derstand.
How far apart were they standing|
Il didn't measure it.
'How far do you think"
Il don't think"
"Your Honor" exclaimed the lawyer,
Il wish you would impress upon this man
the importance Of answering my questions.
The result of this case depends much upon
his testimony"
''Mr. Peggleton,' said the Judge, you
must tell what you know about the fight
in a straightforward manner"
You re the Judge, [ reckOn?"
Yes, I'm the Judge"
"An you want me to tell what | know
about this fight in straightforward man
ner? Well, the fight wasn't in a straight
forward manner, for you never seed such a
scratchin' and twistin' around. The two
men met an cussed each other, but | don t
know why they cussed. One Knocked the
other down, and then the other Knocked
him down Then they fit. After awhile
the other one fell and got up and knocked
him down. Then they fit. About this
time the thing got sorter interestin', and
| sorter wanted to iine hands, myself but
| didn't After awhile they stopped, an
cussed while they was restin, Then they
fit again. an both of them fell over chunk.
| couldn't keep out any longer. The
temptation was too strong, and while they
laid on the ground 1 gethered pole an
says, there's to you, boys, and hit both Of
EN- at once. Then l jumped the fence
an run away, an that's all know about
the fight Thank you for your perlite at
tention," and before he could be restrained,
he left the courtroom.