Arizona weekly citizen., 1883-10-13
The Wild. Wild West.

saa F-aclsco rosf.l
 A well known fellow eltizc1 uo~
 prUWLns s-uot e. say growing through
 Europe writes us the following touching experience.
 ! had been for about half an hour, he
 says, sitting on tlc deck of one of the
 miserable httie packets" that ply be- tween Dover and Calais and exasperst- | Ilg the fellow passengers by refusing to ! ion in the carnival of seasiekness going ou around me, when ruddy.faced,
 white whIskered, bluf-looking individ- l nal who ad been eyeing me for some | tiIle stepped up and sad
 Beg pardon, I'm sure but are you | really the American v
 "Tle American p replied; there
 arc several, l believe" | 'OL, of course, to be sure. l meant | th. one on board. I saw George Blank, | San Francisco, California, U. s., painted on some Of the baggage, aud l picked you out right away Gs the owner" And the stranger inspected me from lead 10 | foot with as vIvId Q curiosity as if Td | been a wild man of the woods. "Weu,' l finally exclaimed, Il am an American. What can l do for yOuY'
 Why-er-nOthing- is no Offense hope. and you are a Californian l tool" he said, rubbing his hands as l though he had indeed met ravs avis. "Ever been scalped by the Indlans% "I think not. l replied. 'YOu've scalped some of them, though haven't your persisted my inquiring friend.
 Concluding that inasmuch as 1 was in for being made a sideshOw of might as well indulge In some of the circus post CT sort Ot thing. I looked him calmly in the eyes and replied: Some twenty six or seven, forget which; I have the tally nicked in the handle of my other sralping knife; 1 carry only one bowie in his country. So seldom one runs across any fun of that kind over here, you know
 killed many white men?" asked the stranger, who appeared to be actually quivering with curiosity.
 "Only eight or teD,' I replied, care lesHly. "YOu see, in California there IS a sort of close season now for shooting white men. 'Tain't like the good old man-fOr-breakfast times. A fellow is only allowed to gun around promiscuOus Hko four months in the year. So it's lard work to keep ones hand in, don't you see"
 " tAAs LAlIltAlCr H1ltA JUG hDHdLEuLlN >tupetied man with the chop whiskers; ''how about Chinamer?7
 "Ohi We kill ChInRmen all the year round-when they're fat" I explained. "But then there IS lately some sort of an ordinance making it misdemeanor to shoot pigtr.l unless he IS on the shady .ilg OI @ st-ajt or gets in your way. Folks are getting too internally particu- lar over that, for a fact
 "Eyer been dIvorced2' finally said the stranger, whose eyes were now sticking out like pegs on a hatrack.
 Nine times, l think" l said. "In tact ] intended to have been again when 1 passed Chicago on my way over, but -he train only stopped eleven minutes iGd there wasn't time enough to rush 1t through takes twenty-two minutes, you know
 l thought this had knocked hIm out, but after a few minutes bewildered CO., gItatiOn he returned to the charge once more.
 "Is 1t really true that all Americans wear chest protectors and eat nothing but Fie2''
 Well, you zee. the fact is that Amer jeans are, as you know, such a frightful- y busy people that they haven't time to it down and eat a square meal, like you English They must have something portabie-s0mething they can carry tbols with them and nibble on the sly. tell you, cir, 1t looks like business 7Eeu you see forty CT fifty men all hang ing Ou to the straps of a street-car with one hand and eating pie with the other
 "f should rather think so, murmured the stranger.
 As for the chest protectors I con- .lnUed, "they are really nothing more than pockets suspended around the neck and large enough to carry a whole pie, which II keeps warm at the same time. A good, hot mince pie slowed away IL this mgDuer not only imparts gentle and grateful warmth to the entire system, but keeps a whole days rations ilwlys within reach of the wearer Grand idea, isn't it:'
 Well, I'm blessedr' said my fairly DaralyZed iuterrOgatOr gazing st my ,hildlike and ingenious face with pro- 'ound awe. "WOuld-er-wOuld you ,blge me with one of your cards" he 'aid. "l want to show 1t to my family, )r they'll never believe a word of this never. Thalks-here's mine"
 As l stepped chuckliDg into my own ] glanced at the card of be stranger. It read: Julius K. Iudkins, San Francisco, Cal"
 | have spent about eight hours day oOl,ing for that man ever since. There sill be bloodshed out of this yet-mark ny words.