Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1883-05-07
PARAGRAPHIC.

A Texas farmer has made complaint
against one of his neighbors for sewing up
the eyes of his cow.
"What fine protuberant forehead your
baby has, Mrs. jones. Did he get it from
from his father?" "No," replied Mrs.
Jones, ''he fell down stairs"
"Gentlemen," said an amateur fsrmer
just from the city, writing to the Chair.
man of an agricultural society "put me
down on your list of cattle for calf"
A lady who was visiting at neighbours
was asked to sing and said that she really
could net do SO in any circumstances,
when little girl went up to her and said,
"Please, is you a.moulting?'
Mr.. NJ. reading Virgil "Three times I
strove to cast my arms about her neck.
and-that's as far as l got, Professor.
"Well, Mr.. NJ, think that was quite far
enough. Wooster Collegian.
A prominent and successful merchant
says that when he is tired and wants rest
he don't go on a tour and spend money, but
he just takes his advertisements out Of the
newspapers and has quiet time,
The manager of the Denver Opera House
issued bull against car-wSeel hats-even
forbidding ladies wearing them to enter his
house. The impaired condition OF his ex-
chequer induced him, however, to modify
the order.
William Knight, who died in Loreina,
Ala, recently, was 100 years old, and had
served through the war OF 1912. He leaves
l65 children and grandchildren. Besides
these grest many are dead, some dying
from old age.
Up to the present time the ground hog is
the most successful weather prophet of the
year. The goose-bone ranks second, and it
is nip and tuck between Virgins, Vennor
and the muskrat for the third place.
Chicago Herald.
A man seeing boa-constrictor at zoo.
logical garden, asked what the beast tied
himself up in hard knot like that for
"Oh," said man, who knew all about
natural history, that's to remind himself
of something when he wakes up"
A man in England, who had been drunk
for thirty years, died few hours after So
boring up. There Is terrible lesson in
this incident that should be needed. 1t
teaches that man should either not get
drunk or else never sober up-we can't for
the life of us tell which, Norristown
Herald.
Recently the church of the colored pso.
pie in Austin, Ark, was partially sub
merged by the food. When Sunday came
the pastor climbed to the roof and preached
sermon to his people, who attended in
skiffs. = Exchange. That congregation
could not be reproached with the term
aDrv weather Christians
Resemblance of human footprints have
been found almost everywhere in ancient
rock. Even very modern horse shoes seem
to have made their mark at some distant
age on such rocks, but when the indenta-
tions are pointed out the imagination must
be violently exerted to say that the impress
sions are like anything in particular.
The Buddhist priests in Japan have com.
menced an agitation against the obligation
both of celibacy and of an exclusively veg
etarisn diet. A grand meeting of repre-.
sentatives from the various sects is an
nounced to be held at Koyasan to discuss
the advisability of removing vexatious and
needless restrictions upon the liberty of the
Buddhist priesthood.
"Then you are thinking of building res
idence next season ?" suggested Flub to one
of our heavy pockets. Yes, thought
should get up something in that line. !"
"What style of architecture? Gothic or
Doric, or Corinthian, or" sob, little
of everything My wife incliues to the
Mary Ann style, but guess I'll put up q
genuine Betsy Jane cottage, with pizaro
all around it. That'll suit me well enough {"
Boston Globe.
An examination OF the younger children
of the public schools of Boston showed that
eighteen per cent. of the number had no
knowledge of COW, further than that
gained from pictures sixty-on per cent
of those examined had never seen an ant ;
sixty five per cent. had never seen corn
growing ninety per cent. did not know
where their ribs were nor exactly what
they were while only six per cent. were
ignorant of the location of their stomachs.
The French Government. deyetes large
sum of money every year to the preserva.
ton and restoration of its ancient monu-
ments. The sum annually dedicated to this
object amounts to about $500, 600, and it is
applied to certain Number of works, which,
as they are completed, are removed from
the list and Others put in their place. The
list for 1888 has just been published, and in
cludes public buildings throughout the
country, among them being the Cathedrsls
of Loan and Lisieux, the Abbey of st.
Denis, the chateau of Courey, Blois and
Pierrefoins, the Amphitheater Of Aries, the
Cluny Museum, and many other buildings
of like character. The operations of the
department charged with this work are not
even confined to France, but extend to AL.
geria, where it is proposed to spend con.
siderable sum on the conservation of a
number of mosques and Roman monu-
ments.
HoRsFoRD's ACID PHOSPHATE imparts new
life and yieor. DIR. s. T. Newcomer, Green.
field, o., says In the cases Of several aged
men. who complained 81 forgeifulness and