The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1883-07-07
'rNE had BOY.
How His pa Received the National
Is@porance Delegates.

e~- tReek- 5aai.
'' l have had the hardest work ever
experienced, jerking soda for the Young
Mea's Christian Association" said the
boy as he peeled banana.
"What do you mean, boy - said the
grocery man. Don't cast any rehec.
tons on such noble association. They
don't drink, do they?"
Drink? Oh, no! They don't drink
anything intoxicating, but when it comes
to soda they flood themselves You
know there has been National conven-
ton OF delegates from all the Young
Mems Christian Associations of the whole
conntry-about three hundred-here. and
our store is right on the street where
they passed four times day, and never
saw such appetites for soda. There has
been one continual fizz in our store since
Wednesday. OF course, if man winks
when | ask him what flavor he wants.
and says never mind, / know enough
to put in brandy. But wouldn't SNUG.
gle it into a man for nothing. This
Christian Association convention has
caused coldness between pa and ma,
though"
How's THAI? Your pa isn't jealous,
is he:' and the gIocery man came around
from behind the ccQnter to get the latest
gossip to retail to the hired girls who
traded with him.
Jealous nothin'," said the boy as he
took few raisins out of box. "You
see, the delegates were shuffled of to all
the church members to take care of. and
they dealt two to ma, and she never told
pa anything about it. They came
to supper the first night, and pa
didn't get home, SO they went to the
convention in the evening, and ma gave
them night.key, and pa came home
from the boxing match about eleven
o'clock, and ma was asleep. Just as pa
got most Of his clothes off he heard some.
body fumbling at the front door, and he
thought it was burglars. Pa has got
nerve enough when he is on the inside of
the house and the burglars are on the
outside. He opened the window and
looked out, and saw two suspicious look
ing characters trying to pick the lock
with skeleton key, and he picked up
new water pitcher that ma had bought
the last time we moved, and dropped it
right down between the two delegates.
Gosh, if it had hit one of them there
would have been the solemnest funeral
you ever saw. Just as it struck they
got the door opened and came into the
hall, and the wind was blowing pretty
hard, and they thought cyclone had
taken the cupola off the house. They
were talking about being miraculously
saved, and trying to strike match on
their wet pants, when pa went over to
the head of the stairs and pushed over
the wire stand filled with potted plants,
which struck pretty near the delegates,
and one of them said the house was com.
ing down sure. and they'd better 90 into
the cellar, and they went down and got
behind the furnace. Pa called me up
and wanted me to 60 down the cellar and
tell the burglars We were onto them and
Tor them to come out, but wasn't very
well, so pa locked his door and went 10
bed. guess it must have been half an
hour before pas cold feet woke ma nm
and then pa told ma not to move for her
life, cause there were two of the s,vaoest
looking burglars that ever was rummoo.
ing over the house, Ma smelled mas
breath to see if he had got to drinking
again, and then she got up and hid her
oroide watch in her shoes, and her
oonalaska earrings in the bible, where
she said no burglar would ever find them
and pa and ma laid awake till daylight.
and pa said he wasn't afraid, and pa and
ma went down cellar. Pa stood on the
bottom stair and looked around, and one |
OF the delegates said, Mister. is the |
storm over, and is your family safe ? and |
ma recognized the voice and said, why, |
'ts one Of the delegates! What are you
dong down there!' and then ma ex.