The Benton weekly record. [volume] (Benton, Mont.) 1880-1885, 1883-05-05
A ralk with a Dude.

brilliant blaze of the April sun listlessl
buttoning his gloves. He was languiC
sombre, and inert.
Up and down Fifth avenue stages rum
bled and roared, and carriages whirled
The doors of the hotel slammed incessant
ly, brightly dressed women tripped by
men strobe bri~kly to and fro, laughin,
nurse maids led groups of frolicsome chill
dren toward the Park, and even the cab
men whistled and sang as they went abou
their work 1t was cheerful scene.
The youth did not seem interested il
anything. Men who passed glanced a
him somewhat contemptuously, or witt
palpable sneers; women looked admi
ringly.
He was narrow chested, and his legs
were lank and wayering. On his heaC
was bell-crowned English beaver, with
a mourning band two inches wide, and
around his neck he wore collar of pre-
posterous height. A drab covert coat,
such as Englishmen wear when riding to
a ''meet.' was buttoned closely about his
far from robust figure. The garment was
so short that the ends OF his spike-tailed
coat fell far below it, producing weird
and eerie effect. His trousers were SO
tight that the uneven contour of his legs
inspired pity, and his feet were squeezed
into long and narrow shoes. Over his
breast dangled single glass. and he wore
English dogskin gloves, the color of ripe
brick dust. He held a slver-tipped cane
under his arm, and stood with one foot
far in advance of the other. His hat was
tipped back on his head, his HAIR brushed
forward at the sides, and he displayed
evidences of rapid moustache. But the
most noticeable thing about him was the
expression of his face. He meant to ap-
pear naughty. Instead, he looked inso-
lent.
He was a dude.
Presently another youth swung around
the corner. He was the counterpart of the
first, and their attire was precisely SINH
lar, even to the brick-dust gloves. They
approached each other solemnly, and then
the newcomer drawled;
''How are you, my brave boy?n
"Eh? Oh, / cawn't say as Pm too
brisk, don't chew know? Pm freakish
to-doy."
You look bit queer"
"Yaas. I've been in the eating house
here trying to worry down bit of chop
with some shandygaff. How are you?"
ooh, I'm fine, you know. | took tub
this mawning, thon fooled me new cart up
the avenue, and had good appetoit for
breakfast"
"Rathah decent fun"
"Yaas."
s'See you at de club later.''
Upon which the newcomer, with face
expressive of great exhaustion, amhled
away. The first youth still stood in front
of the hotel and gazed indifferently about
him. For long time he stood there,
while the San reporter remained in the
background regarding him with reveren-
tial awe, and rejecting that the dude was
the only thing in all the world that had
not been interviewed. A little time passed
and then
81 beg your pardon,o said the reporter.
"'Ow?" asked the youth slowly.
81 beg your pardon.' !
"Oh," said the youth, and after glanc-
ing casually at the reporter he continued
'tI don't remember to have met
you."
'sNo," said the reporter thoughtfully, |
while the youth gazed upon him with i'm
mense contempt, s'but [ wish to ask you
a question or two about matter of great
Importance.
ooh, you don't say Rather an artful
idea. Pm sure. What did you wish to
ask about?''
''The dude.'
The youth started, glanced sharply at
,he reporter for an instant, and then re-
sumed the air of Indifference as he said,
'Well?''
''There is "a widespread rumor down
own that cat chased a dude up Fifth
avenue yesterday at sundown."
"Oh, say!'' said the youth with tran
luil smile. "It's quite too bad, don't
'hew know, to put it upon the-er-aw-
lude, y'know, loike that. The dudes not
lawf as bad as painted! Chased by cat
-Haw!'
''No truth III it at all p"
s'Whoy, I'd lay quid to a bob any
ime that it's pure guy" said the youth,
With some animation; ''and III tell you
vhat," he continued, "the-aw--dude,
lon't chew know, is wretchedly misun-
lerstood."
'What is a dude?'
"A dude" answered the you h, slowly,
SIS gentleman A cad can never be a
lude. He must not be in trade, but must
lave money. dare say there are dudes
who have very little money, but then they
lave blood, y'know But the point of the
hing is that the dude is the embodiment
r-of e-ah-triumph of the gentleman
'ver the ead You take what was once
,noWn as swell, Or fop, Or dandy, and
t was never more absolutely necessary for
lin to be gentleman. The pet, particu-
ar god of swellodm was Beau Brummel,
lon't chew know. and yet he was not