The weekly Union times. [volume] (Union C.H., South Carolina) 1871-1894, 1883-07-13


me- Well, me and my chum went and
headed pa Off or guess he would be run.
ming yet. We g,t him up by the lake shore,
and he wanted to know if the house fell
down. He said he would leave it to me if
he ever said anything against the Feuiaus,
and told him he had always claimed that
the Fcnians were the incest men in the
world, and it seemed to relieve him very
much When he got home and found the
house there he was so tiokled, aud when ma
called him an old bald.headed coward, and
said it was only a joke OF the boys with a
foot ball. he laughed eight out. and said he
knew it all the time, and run to see if ma
would be scared. And then he wanted to
hug me, but it Wasn't my night to hug and
| went down to the theatre. Pa don't
amount TO much when there is trouble
The time that ma had them cramps, you
remember, when you got your cucumbers
first last season, pa came near fainting away.
and ma said ever since they had been
married when anything allied her, pa has
had pains just the saIlo as she has, only he
gruntcd more, and thought he was going to
die. Gosh, if | was a man | wouldn't be
sick every time one of the ncighbors had
the back ache, would YOU?
well, you can't tell, When you have
been married twenty or thirty years you
will know good deal more than you do
now Ynn think Won know it all now, and
you arc pretty intelligent for boy that has
been brought up carelessly, but there are
things that you will learn after awhile that
will astonish you. But what ails your pas
teeth The hired girl was over here to get
some corn meal for Cruel, and she said your
pa was cumming it sine. he had lost his
teeth
20, about the teeth That was too bad
You sec my chum has got il dog that is old
and his teeth have all come out in front,
and this morning borrowed pas teeth be-
fore he got up to osce if VIC couldn't fix them
in the dogs mouth so he could cat better.
Pa says it is an evidence Of a kind heart
for boy to be good to dumb animals, but
it's a darn mean dog that will so back on q
friend. We tied the teeth in the dog
mouth with a string that went around his
> upper jaw, and another around his under
jaw, and you'd dido to see how funny
he looked when he laughed. He looked
just like pa when he tried to smile so as to
get me to come up to him when he wants
to lick me. The dog paved his mouth a
spell to get the teeth out, and then we gave
him bone with some meat on, and he
began to gnaw the bone, and the teeth came
off the plate, and he thought it was Il piece
of the bone, and he swallowed the teeth
My chum noticed it first, and he said we
had got to get in our work pretty quick to
save the plate, and think We were in luck
to save them held the dog, and my
chum, who was better acquainted with
him, united the strings and got the gold
plates out, but there were only two teeth
) left and the dos WAS happy. He wagglcd
his tail for more teeth but we hadn't any
I more. / am going to give him mas teeth
some day. My chum says when dog
, gets an appetite for anything you have go,
to keep giving it to him or he goes back on
} you But think my chum played mean
} on me. We sold the gold plate to jewclry
man and my chum kept the money. l think
as long as furnished the goods, he ought
to have given me something besides the
experience, don't you? After this don't
have no more partners. you bet All this
time the boy was marking on a piece OF
paper, aud soon after he went out the gro
, Gerry man noticed crowd outside. and 60
} ing out he found sign hanging up which
| read, 'Wormy Figs for Parties.
!
VEGETARiAN's BILL OF FARE.-An English
vegetarian has made Il report TO the British Med
icdL Journal of the result of his years expert
, ence without meat. At first he found the vcgc
tables insipid, and had to sauces to get them
down. AS soon as he became accustomed to the
diet oil condiments were put aside cx cept little
salt. The desire for tobacco and alcohol left
, him spontaneously. Then all his digestive func
tions became regular, and he found himse
} wholly fee from headaches and bilious attacks
After three months troublesome rheumatism
, left him, and at the end of year he had gained
eight pounds in weight. lie believes he can dc
more mental labor than before and that oil his
senses are more acute. For breakfast he has
brown bread, apples and coffee dinner consist
, Of two vegetables, brown bread and pie or pud-
ding for tea he rejoices in bread and jam, with
milk and water, and for supper, bread, jam, cold