The DeSmet leader. (DeSmet, Kingsbury Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1883-08-18
TERMS:
BEATING TIE LAWYERS.
A Doctors Diploma Before a Jury.

From tho Presbyterian Observer.
The late Alexander II Stephens nsel
TO tell with great gnsto the following
story, in which he and Robert TooInbs
figured:
A doctor named Royston, had sued
Peter Bennett for his bin, long overdue
for attending the wife of the latter
Alexander II. Sthepens was on the
Bennet side, aud Robert Toombs, then
in the United States senate, was for the
doctor. The doctor proved the number
OF his visits, their value according 10
local custom, and his own authority to
do medical practice. VI. Stephens told his
client that the doctor had made ont his
case and there was nothing whcrewith
to rebut or offset the claim, and the
only thing left to do vas 10 pay IT. "No,"
said Peter, 81 hired you to speak in INV
case, and now speak" Mr. stephens
told hun there was nothing to say, he
had looked On 10 see if it was made out
and It. was. Peter Nas obstinate and ut
last Mr.. Stephens told Peter to make "A
speech himself, II he thonglt one could
be made. Il will, said Peter "if Bob
by Toombs won't be too hard on me 4"
Senator To0mbs promised he would not
and Peter began:
''Gentlemen of the Jury, yon and ! il
plain farmers and if we don't stick 20.
gether these ere lawyers and do tors
will get the advantage Of us. amt no
lawyer or doctor, and amt no objec,
tions to them in their proper place, but
they amt farmers, gentlemen of the
jury. Now this man, Royston Was no
doctor, but | Went !or him to come and
doctor my wife = sore leg, aud he come
and put some satNe truck into II, and
some rags, but never done it a bit Of
good Gentlemen of the Jury, | dom
believe he is II doctor anyway. There
are doctors IA ls doctors sure enough,
but tins man DOM earn his money ,as il
you send for him, AZ Mrs. Sarah Atkin-
son did FOR negro boy as ls worth -
00O he lust kills him and wants Won 10
pay it,"
81 don't" thundered the doctor.
'Did you cure him" asked Peter, with
the slow accents OF II nudge with black
cap Oh, til" doctor vas silent and
Peter procec led;
"As was sayHg, gentlemen of the
jury, We farmers when we sell oar cot.
ton, has not 10 give valley for the mon
ey We ask, and doctors amt none to
good 10 be- put 10 the same rule And
uon't believe this ere Sam Royston s a
doctor anyhow"
"Look nt my diploma, # YOU think |
am no doctor
His Diploma exclaimed the ora tor
with great contempt His diplomat
Gentleman, that Is a bil word 'or print.
ed sheepskln, aud il dou't make doe.
tDr Of the sheep as iir>t wore il, nor
does it OF the man ~ now carries it, a
good newspaper has more in it. and
pint out to ye that hc amt no doctor ut
all" The doctor was now in II fury, and
screamed out;
ASK my patients if am not doc.
tor"
81 asked my wife" retorted Peter
she said she thought he was not"
ASK my other PATIENTS said the
doctor.
This seemed to be the straw that
broke the CameIs back; for Peter re.
piled with look and tome Of unutterabe
sadness: That is II hard saving. gentle
men OF the Jury, ana one that requires
me to die, or to have powers aS | have
heard tell ceased t. hr oppressed since
the apostles. Does he expect NE TO
bring the Angel Gabriel down 10 toOt
his h ,rn before his time and cry alOnd; !;
Awake, We dead, and tell this court
and Jury your opinion Of sam RnystOn's
practice"
Am to go TO the lonely chnrchyard
and rap on the silent tomb and say To
'um as is at last at rest from physiC and
doctors bills, cit up here, you, and
state If you died natural death, or was
hurried off by some doCtoTs'' He says
ask his patients, aud, gentlemen Of the
jury, they are all dead Where is Mrs
Beasley's man, Sam ito ask the worms
in the graveyard where he lies Mr..
Peaks woman, sarah, WAS attended by
him, and her funeral was appointed,
and he, the doctor, had the corpse
ready. Where is the likely Bill as be.
longed to Mr.. Mitchell? Now in
glory, expressing his opinion Of Roys-
tons doctoring. Where is that baby gai
Of Harry Stephens? She is where doc
tors cease 10 trouble, and the infants
are at rest, Gentlemen, he has eaten
chickens enuuel Il. my house To pay for
this salve. | found the rags, and dont
suppose he charges for making her worse
and even he don't pretend 10 charge for
curing her, and | am humbly thankful
he never give her nothing for her IN
nards, as he did his other patients, for
something made 'um all die mighty sud.
den"
The applause WAS preat The doctor
lost and Peter won.