Morning journal and courier., 1883-08-25
MET.

Women kiss each other when they meet and prize fighters shake hands.-Louisvill, Courier-Journal.
 baker advertising that his bread wal ''hard to beat" was disgusted when the print CT made it ''hard to eat. .''-Boston Com Bulletin. If the managers are not extremely careful the fact that there is to be worlds fair ir Boston this fall will leak out before the ex hibition opens.-Milton News.
 ''Walk slower, papa" cried the little girl whose short steps were no match for the strides of her masculine progenitor; ''can't you go nice and slow, like 8 policeman ?''- Citizen.
 Almost any man will forget his $1O um. brelIa when he leaves @ restaurant but give 8 woman parasol worth $1 and take her into fifty restaurants, and she will not forget it once.-Puck.
 A scientist asks: ':How was man distrib uted on the earth ?" Well, brother, judging from painful experience, we would say it was by means of an insidious banana peel Commercial Advertiser.
 forest fire in British Columbia exploded a powder mill. Every pane of glass in a vil-
 lage near by was broken, and everybody ex-
 claimed: 'fWhy, have the schools opened
 again ?''-Philadelphia News. -.
 A Jersey IS 8 very nRuOSOInS garment
 when the form under it is handsome, and
 vice versa-Lowell Courier. Poor simple
 ton know ye not that the form is made to fit tho jersey, and not the jersey to fit the
 form.-Boston Transcript,
 'sNow, John,'' said the father of the city
 family to the father of the country family,
 five have been spending all summer with
 you, and, as some sort of recompense, we are going to have some amateur theatricals
 and eyiv u0r fQr0W6lI hAn6Hk " 6Nn thankee. Charles, r was the reply. tDon't wait to do that The farewell will be benefit enough to me. ."-Burlingto Free Press
 An Austrian scientist has succeeded in lighting up the inside of mans body, for the purpose of facilitating the performance of surgical operations. It is expected that patent medicine manufacturers will now fur nish an electric light with each bottle of medicine, so that the purchaser can llumi- nate his inside to see that the only genuine liver rejuvenator is not tampering with his lungs or his never-dying soul.-Tsxas Sift- ings. - .-..--.- -.- .z--=,-5a :s.s
 When you see boy with the pockets of his psntaloons bulging out until he looks
 like great humble-bee laden for the hive, while he walks along trying to look as thin as split laih, and wearing profound expres- sion of supernatural innocence you know, without referring to the code of signsls, that boy has been lingering in somebody orchard, and doesn't care to have undue publicity given to facts that only concern him person ally.-Burdette.
 : Verbatim copy of letter from an Irish man to his son in Dublin Dear Son-If you arewell when this letter reaches you we are all well. By the bearer send you my old brown coat get 8 new one made out of it. Your mother sends you unbeknowing to me five pounds. hope you will not spend them foolishly; if you do, can just tell you that you are a silly goose, and remain your affeetionate father. P. S.-Your sister Sally wanted me to tell you to send her 8 shell comb, but as forgot it this time, and the letter was already sealed, will mention it in my uextp ze