davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
A Patant Medicinn parai;ae.

II the negroes uf the South could
read there would be such demand fOf
patent medicines, porous p'as'crs. pills
and stomach bittcrs rs would force CIV.
cry manufacturer to double bis help and
capacity. The negro is always ailing.
No matter how healthy he looks or how
strong he seems, he believes himself af-
iiicted. If he could read almunacs and
circulars he would think So twice as
strongly.
At Dalton. Ga, SAYS n correspondent
Of the Detroit Free Press, SAN big
fellow pick up a barrel OF ilour rs easily
rs could have lifted 25 pound sack.
and when complimented him on his
strength he replied:
''ies. boss, | seems powerful strong,
but YOU doan' know what a hard time l
has Of it. lie got llber complaint. dys-
pepsia and consumpshun. an | reckon
| won't ncber see snow ily agin."
asked him what remedies he had
been using, and he replied that he had
been taking the dust Of burnt leather
and mixing it with cold tea. Nothing
whatever allied him, but If he could
have got hold Of ten dollars he would
have used eight Of it in buying medi-
cines.
was in livery stable al NJ .rietta
when Il man came in with bottle OF
prepared Jamaica Ginger. One of the
colored men employed about the stable.
who hadn'tlost day for wears aud who
looked as rugged as mountain. looked
at the bottle three or four times aud then
asked:
"What ye got dar. Kurnel?'
Something for apopiex.y," was the
reply.
Would We mind givin' me sip Of ii,
kase my apoplexv has been takin' on in
dc moas' dre.l'nl manner fur dc las
wepks"
You can take pub il yon wish to-"
The cork was drawn and the negro
lifted up the bottle and took three
heavy swallows of the fiery s.uiE The
next three minutes wereii,e longcst and
hottest ones he ever saw. but as soon us
he could speak he remarked.
''Ah! but dat stuff seems to hit do
right spot! reckon il will cure up ihy
apoplexy all ris ht. m like 'nutf may
light on sum.hiii' else good fur conecs.
tion OF dc lungs aa' water Oh dc brainr
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
idaho Jurisprudence.

Justice O'Sniiiin. up At Blackfoot,
tried his first case recently. He has
some crude notions about even-handed
justice, and claims to be thoroughly up
on parliamentary etigu.ite.
The case was one in which Don Qnix-
ote Centipetie was charged with the
larceny Of one sorrel mule, the proper
ty Of Claude Melnotte Rooney. valued
At $75. ut the county and Territory
aforesaid. and on the 10th day Of Oct.i-
ber, A. d. 1882, and that on said day
he. the said Don Qnixote Cen,ipede, did
take, steal and ride away and drive
away the mute aforesaid, contrary to
the statutes in such case made and pro-
vided and against the peace and dignity
of the Territory of Idaho
The case was tried, and defendant
having been found guilty, the Justice
about to sentence him to the penitcn-
tiarv for life when the counsel called the
nttenti0n of the court to the fact that,
as an examining nsag1stfase, slss Osssys
had authority to bind Mr.. Centipe,le
over for his appearance ut the next term
Of the District Court. Judge O'Sniilin
therefore medilied his Judgment to the
requirement. vi u DVHV iuT Co'D iOT ue-
PENDANTS appearance rs aforesaid. De.
fendants counsel then rose and stated
that. owing to certain Irregularities and
peculiarities developed in the case, he
would now make motion for new
trial
Gentlemen" said Judge OSniflin to
the bysianders. you have motion. do
l hear 4 second?"
An eccentric horse-thief on the back
seat seconded the motion.
Gentlemen" resumed his Honor,
''you have heard the motion. Are you
ready for ;ha question:"
Question:
II he motion has been made and sec-
onded that the defcndcnt Ccnlipede be
given new trial All those in favor
will say aye.
Big chorus Of ayes.
"Those opposed will say no."
ut is vote. The prisoner will be
granted new trial"
The West is full of self-made men
who are not very familiar with Es,e,.'s
Pleading and High on Injunction. but II
you think they are not familiar with
parliamentary usages. you do not know
them.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
?'h, hlan Who i,lvaa Un.


Riding alontr the h.hwa, be.Heea
Eufana and Ulin., Spi.inyrs ca,.ie upnu
native Aiabam Sc ted cn !. .n:s b,
tie roadsde. He Was a I.staci ric,us,
Of 'ail broxe M" H.. ioalea sick, h.
clothes were ragged. aaI &c was baIc
fn0iea i'm Mas be ans, g h4d no hpn.
10 Wear. he ha,A@i w. "a q wear
wax as halted. ai,a wien | ask,.'
ab N the road he sioux his i.&d ara
replied:
Don't bother me, stranger I'm clean
gin cut"
~ hats t!.e trnuh"ph
'Ol, everything T-cvrgNlaing. I've
had sickness and losses and lawsuits
aud fri'5u!at:ans Till mv sand is all goue
came oui acre la nic nj 1s iuvse,{ an,
I'm .xnesting 'yrr, ninn.; to i,ear the
toot nf the bora"
..'Tle.t's too b.i."
Yes. il S bal; TIE DID woman s..c'ii
hive 10 peg 40 = alone. and the chill
dren viii it;tye to dir out or starve. and
some other man will woilop my old
mule and kick my dog It's bad
bad. but I've got To go. Thcy'il tini
my drat body out here and plant il in
some swamp, and tAal'li be the las, OF
me-"
Cant help you any wavo"
''Strsnger, are We biu!iing?'
"No."
"kcal|y mean i,?'
"Of course
"Tuen put yer hand riyht thar an
squeeze. Thcm's the first kind words
I've heard in twenty vars. Patch nv
hid" If don't feel Ike living three
no'tths longer"
"Ea,e Il pug of iohacco2"
"Wiil II VIII "A drowning man hoi,cr
fur raft?'
He took the plug and tore away II
quarter OF it at one bite, and as the taste
began to come he cried out:
stranger, it's heap better than 60
ing TO Heaven! Yum. yum! Wny. l
really believe I'll live till cotton comes
ofIn
"And here's some brandy which |
carry to use in The water down here
Won't yOu take pulp
won't /? Stranger, that's too good,
and can't believe it. ! haven't tasted
brandy since Lee SURRENDERED"
He took the lisk and pulled away un.
til half the contents had disappeared,
and rs he handed it back his ewes began
to shine. his hair pushed his Old hat off.
and he cr:'cAed his heels together and
eXciaimed:
Stranger, I'm going to live-@oinc
to live all summer-aIl winter all next
year! I'm a new man-Fm right up to
the mark a~an--and I'll 90 home and
give the family to understand that dads
on deck and good for -cvcnty-iive wears
yet! Whoop! If YOU hadn't been sop"w-
erfuly kind to me Id bet my old ha,
again a cent that | could lick You in
two minits" Detroit Free Press.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
Newspaper Work.

A few years ayo the newspaper pro-
fession WAS looked down upon rs moth
ing hut \ Gehenneh for the wrecks and
cripples Of other professions. A report
er was the very acme OF social degrada-
ton. Now. however, it is different.
Every one of the Young men who have
just left some anna mater believes that
he can write, and that he has but to of
fer mis- services to be installed in some
responsible position. How many are
disappointed the walls of a newspaper
Office could relate were they able to
speak. Newspaper work is not mat
ter of writing, but Of putting as many
facts. and rs much of them as is possi-
BILE. in the brie!est possible space. 1t
takes = young man fresh from college
long time to find that ont, and until
that knowledge is obtained they haze to
sniiaremaay paag while seeing issi e,l-
itr's Ssue psysscii nfskiGg s.so !!sssss.e
with their elegant periods, nice iiiustru-
tions and wor,!y introductions. II a
man has not in>'inc,ively got an eye for
news and the faculty Of getting it ex.
pedinusy, he may polish the side
wa ks for Lifetime and vet be no
nearer the goal he started ON, to reach.
The most remarkable thing, however. is
the number of women who crowd into
the profession Of journalism by sheer
ppr>istencv. Once woman laws aside
her natural reserve she becomes more
pushing and irrepressib,e than a drnm-
mer and thus m ny succeed in actually
forcing themselves into positions. As
a rule. they make good news-gatherers
IN c 'r'ain dena",'nents. A few of them
are inierriewers, and as such they have
Succ eded better than most men. But
equally. as Il rule, women make bad
news writer's. They are prolix, and the
natural female inclination for post
scripts follows them throughout. BE.
sides, they are generally awkward per-
sona.es TO have in an Office. They are
apt to be exactng and constantly claim
privileges on the strength of the defer
ence due a lady from gen,Ieman
City editors often find them the bane Of
their lives. and to male reporters there
are twenty unpopular To one popular
female scllDe.- IUe fyDnr
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
Brought to Eay.

Mr.. De Sala. in his "America Revisit
ed tells an amusing story OF his first
experience in San Francisco with a
..Heathen Chinee." The Englishman
was stopping at the Palace Hotel. in
whose laundry some forty Cinnamon
were employed. On the second day of
his stay. a youthful Celestial presented
himself. early in the morning, at the
Englshman's door with y large basket.
After much laundering with pigeon
English, Mr.. De Sala thought he un-
derstood that the youth had come from
the hotel laundry for one piece washing.
He was about to hand over his soiled
linen, when one of the black chamber
maids. an Old Aunt Sally, entered the
room. '.Who glib hin, leaf TO come
derc?" she asked. surveying the smira-
nglaundryman with an "up-and-down'
look.
He blushed. and muttered some.
thing about ''piece" and ''catchee'' and
..belOngee.
..But lie washin' no be!ongee you,
john" she rrtor,ed, with aus,ere digni-
W. ..An' YOU no belonyee to de hotel,
an you keep de profits away from dc
hotel by comm here when nobody sent
70 you.''
lie shufiied and wriggled and smiled,
but Aunt Sally went on: .'lt was very
wrong Of you, John. II l was to tell
em in de hoilice down stairs, dcy'd
neber let you inter de hotel agin. II
was right mean OBJ you. John. Il was
like your imperence to come sMOuchin'
around here looking after de white
folks washin'."
Then she gave John i sound box on
the ear. and. - he raj, "a. explained q
the En9lish gue6t That the Gl,iAAraAr
| - ~ ssuut1s sijes Nho ffind N ptentr
.s q! @ M ]! III s IN c.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
Law a Painting Person Down.

1t is surprising how everybody rushe.
at fainting person and strives to raise
him up, and especially to keep his head
erect. There must be an ins'inCtive mp
prehension that il n person seized with
Rfainting OF other fit fall into the re-
cumbent position death is more i'm
minent. must have driven mile to-
day while n lady fainting was held up.
right. found her pulseless, white,
and apparently dying, and | believe
that if had delayed ten minutes longe,
she would really aavc died. aid hel
head down on II lower level than he,
body. and Immediately color Returned
to her iips and cheeks, and she became
conscious. To the excited group OF
friends said Always remember this
fact--rameiv: fan,ing is caused by .
want Of blood in the brain; the hear,
ceases to act with suiiicien; force t.
send the usual amount of blood 10 the
brain. and hence toe person loses coi,.
seriousness because the function Of tac
brain ceases. X store the blood 10 the
urain ald instantly tie person RECEIVERS.
Now. though the blood is propelled Ia
Al parts oi the body by the acton of the
heart, Yet il is still under the influence
OF tie laws of cravitation. Ia the erect
position the blood ascents to the head
against gravilation. and the supply to
tie brain is diminished. as compared
with the recumbenl position. the hearts
pn sati"n being equal. II. then. you
pace a person sitting whose heart has
nearly ceased to beat, his brain will fail
to receive blood, while if YOU lay him
down, with the head lower than the
heart, blood will run into the brain by
the mere force of gravity; and in faint
ing. III sufficient quantity to restore
consciousness. Indeed. Nature teaches
us bow to manage the fainting persons.
for they always fail, and frequently are
at one" restored by til" recumhent post
ton into whicn they are thrown.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
Setting q Eo,'y Broken Eeck.

Perhaps the most wonderful surgical
operation ever performed in Southing-
ton was that which saved the life of the
little son Of Mr.. Orlando Whitney, Of
Darien, whose neck was dislocated by
the upsetting of \ carriage. The opera
ton was performed by Drs. Russell, Of
New Haven. end Osborne. Of Southing-
ton, and was one which required great
skill and delicate manipulation. The
little one WAS obliged to lie in plaster
Of Paris cast OF his whole body, from its
neck to below the knee joints. 1t WAS
the only thing that could have saved his
life-a movement to the right or left
would have caused inst Mt death. DIR.
Osborne. we believe, has Ind charge of
the case since the setting, and under his
care the child is progressing favorably.
--Sonttinston (Coan.) H1nix.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
Macbeth's soliloquy.
Br r, ". CRISwELA.

Is fhis dagger which see before ma
The handle toward my han.
Or Is the-hlc-point toward my han'f
fellow can't most aiwuyS Some-ntc-some
times tell.
Come, let me- clutch thee-Oho, you wontf
Well, then. I'll show ye who's runuin the ske
-hic-sGcbsnx!
] have tnee-nic hot; and yet l see thee Still
Hello! see two daagcrs, or lin goat!
Art tiou not, istal too-hic-toolLplckA
Sensible to feeling, a to sight! No;
I'll At could not be-Lc-eise could
Feel thee double, - double u, I-hic-see
theel
P'raps thou art but a couple Of e.ggers of the
mind,
A false cre-hic--creation, So to speak,
Proceeding from the hcat-orpgessed b ain
BY Jo-lic-Jovel htat-ol pressed BRAN 10
good,
And will that word lay up in the vast
6torehouse OF my mind for Ars.-ktc-Nn
Aaobethl
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03

A shabby hooking customer came into
the office and asked us to sign petit
tion 10 have himself appointed on the
police force, saying that the Legislature
had ruined his business. What was
your business, and how did the Legisla-
ture ruin ite' II kept one Of the most
fourishing g:mbling-roons in Austin.
and the legislators broke 1t up by a.l-
journing and going home. - 7cxas pas
l1er
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
Shaies ani h.,e Deearatiov

prnlnbs, nutiiing Wil rv be offered
he tra;ie in shade roo,ls which so uni.
:rrsaiiy fills the ponuar demand as
Hollands. so cumreioN do they soften
the light and so durabie re their wear.
ing properties. Oi late Years. however,
great demand arisen for painted
nar"r shades. which for appearance arr
very desirable.
The co!oriD"s and designs which can
be applied to paper are unlimited, and
the artists scope is unhouHdcd by con.
vertionalities. Tie plain dad". which
was adopted n snort while back as
fanciinl nrnamruiatinn for the window
shade is now succeeded by haud-mate
sketches. During tle past few wears
decorative efforts in every style of shade
goods have not been wanting. and in
some goods twinniIg vines are cucled
mp over the sides and tops of the shades.
lransparencies also have been intro
huced. which show plcasng effects from
outside as well as inside the house.
the silk shade. although expensive
and easily disor,iercd. is becoming more
and more used in rich decoration. Itis
gathered in folds across the window,
two or more cords passing the folds tc
slat ut the bottem, and when these
cords are drawn mp the curtain is gath.
cred shirrcd Something emiiod, iny
the same principle has been oifnrel the
trade in times past. by which the eur.
tain is drawn to the right or lett, or W
Or down. hy me.,s 1 ennngi cords anc
pu''nvs to regulate a iGii rirged ship.
The object of this idea was excetlent. ~
by it one could shut oil the sun from
whichever corner of the window it va.
entering, without shutting out at the
same time, as is now often the case, =
great deal Of desirable liz ht.. Carpc
Trade Recieu.
Served the RuTian Right.
MILDLY Morgan. the woman stock re-
porter OF the New York Times, taught
an insolent policeman q valuable les
son tho other day. This fcllow ,nist1k
her for wanderer FROM tie bsekw.nds
a. she was walking on wharf near the
Battery recently. aud loudly advised
her 70 ..walk overheard. She quietly
t,ok Its nilinbei. reported him ~ his
station. Isicniiticst him whea - Up.
1seaissal nt tlse cMd nf bix X ts;ls. and hkl
I'm salspsiaais k,f tsro wessks julslt
1laT he aSteg NM, t ~ !
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
D King Of Fruits.
BY UNCLE JOEL.

Some er pa'shel ter dc apple, oddahs clamor
e., 4. plum.
Some fiii enjoyment in &c cherry, Ocdahs make
de peaches hum;
Some git festrtcd ter de onion. o6cshs iub the
tctoke.
But nay taste an wetermellen or boun' By q
plea SAINT yoke.
Some i'm pleasure In the orange, od,ahs
CSoose De cant slnurc.
Some are 1or' oh de bxanxna some de buckle
berry scoop:
Oar er timber in dc punpstn fo' de richest kind
oh pies.
But Dc spncs'led watermellenI Obi how full
hit fills my eyes.
To must elmo ter eft De app!e, er de cherry.
'er de psacb,
An mus AilIs when yo' eat Gem, keep ioc:ah
widin reNch;
But Dc IubIy watermellcn makes hits bed upon
de gToiin'.
AID 80 siasl..s,s. pnt &c 1ont1r. In do uoouurht
makes the roun'.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1883-01-03
TAX POINT. oAkorA.

Uevf1l eser sos ssassy tass. yss-s Receiver !;
Ss q. .. Lad :, 81 S-SMiil' u, 4ui b~cssr
s1QaAihssI W',A The Os,as /. add acs Hy OF +
ovrno~m i~sss hssueh ~ tns f~rti"ty ci J.
9lAs WH - - ty snsWef o. etars ~
4uS8ss - Attvs ~ % .annee ~ acc iri". nv, 9
go rnesen' aDAe - ssr the .w- 4 tue rui --
0s's.: Aise viii a,tsni promptly TO tb~ c,nc-
0ssi - Oec orStorS Ass es aud u s-sAl- iesd
ssiss Ala1 isAAs that b.. e y ~ 2ssiJ L
Pep - tssa ua,y :oS ~ita .s-s In cs-~ os
oCs - nsssssA AAds q "a. Il en- et~zd
stas sad r -osEr h~i sstriE. A. z.rfss &c. ,r
- ~ oss - y. os.Ss.as ~ tsr ina hH!fF u
oNW'sa. 4 Act esu - =. Z; e.axi III 4.fhr- at.
~ - srsaAi oWseass - tie raj i...n OlDes
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1883-12-11
Selr-ImpOsed Risks.

Railroads are built for well defined
specific purpose, which does not include
their use for pedestrianism. This print
pie is so well recognized in Europe that
it is made by law penal otfense-in
ENGLAND and in some Continental
countries-for persons to walk on the
tracks. In this country there are por-
tons of railroad tracks, particularly
in the vicinity of manufactures, that
are so constantly trodden that the earth
has become almost as solid as "a pave
ment. The railroad managers put up
warning signs, but they are disregarded,
and once in awhile ''anawful accident"
horrifies the community; man or a
woman walking on the track is torn to
pieces by the remorseless locomotive.
one track having train coming In one
direction and another track one going
in the other direction, a step on to
either track being probably fatal,
There is curve under a high bank, in
close vicinity to a railroad depot, which
is occupied by two important railroads
with their network of tracks, and at
no hour of the day are all these tracks
clear This curve leads to large man
ufactories, and the roadbed is the COM
mon route of at least two thousand
workmen twice if not three times day.
On account of the killing of twopersOns
who were walking the track, the rail
road companies we're blamed and the
managers put up warning signs-as far
as they could 90 in prohibition, in the
lack of law, with its penalties and en-
forcements. Yet the use of the track
is in nowise abated for pedestrian
route, and it never will be abandoned
until law, that shall be enforced
compels these riskers of life and limb tt
use the general and public highway
that is trife longer but is absolutely
safe.
In many of our railroad stations
'.unioR depots''- several trains or
different roads meet, or else they pass
with only moments interval. Cross
inc from side to side of such a station
is very common; sometimes by persons
carrying loads OF baggage, Miscalcu
lating the speed of locomotive, even
| at its slowing-up pace, perhaps gaugine
its velocity by that of horse, they arr
overtaken Unexpectedly, and ifnot killet
are seriously hurt.
The getting on to cars when in motion
is another method of risking limb ant
life without proper cause. The feat o
swinging on to a railroad car in motion
| which looks so easy and so graceful
when practiced by an agile conducto
or an ambitious brakeman, is one diff
cult to the occasional traveller; and ye
there are plenty of men who think
shows sort of independence to wal
until the train starts before saying good
| by to friends.
Probably the foolish practice OF jump
inc from an arriving train before
comes to a stop is the occasion of
large number of yexatious if not of SER
| Gus accidents. 1t is still practiced, how
ever, by those who learn nothing eithe
by experience or by observation
| Scientific american.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1883-12-11
ADVICE TO morsRRs

Are you disturbed at night and broken
of your rest by sick child suffering and
crying with pain of cutting teeth? If 50,
send at once and get bottle of Mrs.
Winslow's Soothing Syrup for children
tecthing It's value is incalculable.
1t will relieve the poor little sufferer i'm
mediately. Depend upon it mothers.
there is no mistake about it. Ii cures
dysentery, diarrhoea, regulates the stom-
ach and bowels, cures wind collie, soft
ems the gums, reduces Inflammation. and
gives tone and energy to the whole sys-
TEN. Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup
for Children Teething is pleasant to the
taste, and is the prescription of one OF
the Oldest and best female physicians and
nurses in the United States, and is for
sale by all druggists throughout the
world. Price 25 cents per bottle.
feb 80 m-w-s m 1-y
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1883-12-11
Chancery Notice.
STATE OF ILLINOIS, 90
D..lr V-I...l .H....... : -

- Al h Vt lbLlNolo' s.
Rock Island County, %
In the Circuit Court to the January Term, 1884
William H. Smell VS.. LavinaJ j. Snell,-In Chan
Gerry.
Affidavit Of the non-residence of Layina j. Smell,
the above named defendant, having been filed
i'll the Clerks office of the Circuit Court of said
county, notice is therefore hereby given to the
said nonresident defendant that the complainant
filed his bill of complaint in said Court, on the
Chancery side thereof, and that summons has
been issued ont Of said Court, wherein said suit
is now pending returnable on the first Monday
in the month of January next, as is by law re
CURED Now, unless you, the said nonresident
defendant above named, shall personally be and
appear before said Circuit Court, on the first day
of the next term thereof, to be holden at Rock
Island, in and for the said county, on the first
Monday in January next, and plead, answer oil
demur to the said complainant's bill of com
plant, the same and the matters and thing.
therein charged and stated will be taken as con
fessed and decree entered against You according
to the prayer of said bill.
Rock Island, Illinois, November 24d, 1888.
LEVI F. HARRISON, Clerk.
P o'MARA, Compt's Sol, nov-24-d4w
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1883-12-11
ON THIRTY NAYS TRIAL

The Voltaic Belt Co.. Marshall, Mich,
will send DIR. Dyes Celebrated Electro
Voltaic Belts and Electric Appliances on
trial for thirty days to men young or old
who are afflicted with nervous debility
lost vitality and kindred troubles
guaranteeing speedy and complete restora
ton of health and manly vigor. Address
as above.-N. B No risk is incurred, as
thirty days trial is allowed.
dec 90 d-w1y