davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

o'her-you can't place them for sure
never.
II had an odd experience to-day. ac-
costed an old guy with a white choker and
bald head He lad an awful go-lo meetin'
look on, and his mouth was all puckered
up like he had been eating green persim.
mons. L threw him some work ON religious
subjects, and when 1 came back after it he
swore at me like pirate and bought a Po-
lice Gazette"
(which do you find the easiest to size
up as you say, the men or the womer?'
ooh, the women. You can most always
strike il as regards them; and if you are
in doubt, a cheap edition OF some snide
novel is sure to catch 'em."
Suppose you should strike a man who
could not read, what would you give
him 2"
81 suppose you think would give him
an illustrated paper with lots OF pictures
in il, but wouldn't. / DONE very often
run across people who will admit that they
cannot read but If see man pick up
the book or paper have thrown i'm tis
seat and hold it upside down, | watch
him pretty close, then il am pretty sure
he cannot read | 60 ard offer him some
publication that has good deal of read
ing IN IL and picture every two or
three pages. This pleases him and he buys
nearly every time. You see there are not
enough pictures TO give the idea that he
bought il for those alone, and vet enough
TO keep him from going to sleep.
But | must be up and doing. So long,"
and the butcher proceeded to go through the
train taking in ducats here there aud
everywhere.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

ANSWER: You are not old enough for a
soldier, but you are old enough to pillow
corn, drive cows and cut wood. Better
stay on a farm than to become soldier
and get scalped by the Indians. When the
regulars fight Indians the boys-new re-
cruits--are always put to the front and
kept there until they get killed.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24
THAT HACKING COUGH can he
so quickly cured by Sbiloh's Cure. We
guarantee il. For sale by Bari Il Miller.
Killed by q Kick.

Word was received in Sedalia, early yes
terday morning, that Jesse Minter, the
nine year-old son of Mrs. Piety Minier,
who resides fifteen miles northeast OF Soda
liza, near Lookout postcffice, was instantly
killed Monday night by being kicked in
the head by horse. The boys skull was
crushed and his brains scattered on the
ground.
A casket was furnished yesterday by
Mclaughlin Brothers, and the funeral
took place in the afternoon.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24
Wants to Enlist.
HOLDEN, Mo-. IA July.

HOLDEN, Mo-. IA July.
EDITOR BAZoo = want to inlist in the
reglsr armie and want to no few potic. =
lers l am II years old am old eiuff |
am t. ct and in hes tall please give ME
the poticklers rite soon as may leave.
lours in all haste
w. b. SEARCLIFF
Holden
John Co
Mo
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24
Senator Vests Purchase.

A deed was filed in the recorders Office
at Kansas City, on Monday, in which Sens-
tor George H. Pendleton and wife, of Ohio,
decided to Senator George G. Vest all Of
their interest in lot is and part OF lot II,
block 4, Hubbard's addition, for consider
alton of $62,050. The property is located
on the southeast corner of Eighth and
Broadway, and was purchased in common
BY Senator PendletOn and Senator Vest
some two years ago. Recorder Lucas said,
in commenting upon the sale, that it was
the first instance in the history OF Kansas
City, and the FIRST case he ever heard of, in
which one United States senator had sold
another piece of real estate.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

-CoLoRLEss AND COLD.-A young girl
deeply regretted that she was so colorless
and cold Her face was TOO white, and her
hands and feet felt as though the blood did
not circulate. Alter one bottle of Hop
Bitiers had been taken she was the rosiest
and heaithiest girl 10 town, with vivacity
and cheerlulness Of mind gratifying to her
friends
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24
Married.

At s o'clock p. M, July Is, by the Rev.
d. {. Brown, at the residence of Peter
Lusch, Frank Wilbarger and Miss Jane
Pope.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24
Flies and Bugs.

Flies, reaches, ants, bed-bugs, rats, mice
gophers, chipmunks, cleared out by Rough
ON Rats" l5c.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

-"As two boxes of Dr. Benson's Celery
and Chamomile Pills cured friend Of
mine of neuralgia, whom the doctors
couldn't help, III send for some for myself"
Clifford Shand, Windsor, Nova Scotia.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

~ Every color OF the Diamond Dyes is
perfect Unequalled for brilliancv. See
the samples Of colored cloth at the drug
gists.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

For lame Back, Side or Chest use Shi-
loh's Porus Plaster. Price 25 cents. For
sale by Bard & Miller.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

SLEEPLESS NIGHT made miserable
by that terrible cough. Shiloh's Cure is
the remedy for you. For sale BY Bard 4
Miller.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

Courier Journal: If the eastern hotel
man who has the bedbug that bit Mrs.
Langtry would secure the insect for exhibi-
ton, he wouldn't have to keep hotel for
living.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

CATARRH CURED, health and sweet
breath secured by Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy.
Price 80 cents. Nasal injector free. For
sale by Bard Il Miller.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24

by woman who claimed to be his wife.
| The article created not a little talk
throughout the city, and especially among
the railway men, not one of whom believed
that Mallory was guilty as charged
Early yesterday afternoon a BAZoO re-
porter, in company with a well-known
seuth-end conductor who has known Mr..
Mallory for seven or eight years, called
upon the woman at her boarding house on
Lamine street, and Intercepted her still
| further regarding what she had alleged in
the interview published in the BAZoO.
The conductor told her that he had visit
ed her for the purpose of convincing him
self as to the truth of her story, and if she
was really what she claimed, she should
be cared for and not want for anything.
He then questioned her as to where she
first met Mallory, and was told that ii was
! in February last, while ne was running a
passen, er train between Sedalia and Par
sons. This was where she put her foot in
it, as il were, for her interrogation knew
positively that MIR. Mallory was not rum
ming passenger train in February, but,
instead, freight train. Mr.. Mallory did
run a passenger train while Conductor
Patterson was i'll, but it was not during the
month of February.
1.-The conductor next asked her where it
was that she married Mallory. To this
she declined TO reply, saying it was of no
consequence. She said she was welded to
him on the 7th of February, but the name
of the town where the ceremony was per-
formed she refused to divulge.
The third question was, "Where did you
board while in Parsonsw To this the wo-
man replied that she stopped at the
Belmont house for brief period and then
went 20 the Abott house, and Mallory was
St. Landry democrat., 1883-03-17
An ExtraYsgant King.

The cup;dity of King Kalakaua, of
Hawaii, appears not less rapacious than
that of some of the monarchs of Eu-
rope. He is described by a writer in
the San francisco Report as "a huge,
over-grown. tan co1ored gentleman of
Malay descent, whose capacity for
carr, ing champagne has frequently
aroused the admiration of outs de bar
bar ans. y Put he has other capacities
as well. Some time ago the King made
q sort of lunch and Judy tour through
Europe, and he returned with immense
ideas The simple republican customs
that he had seen in the United States
were spoken of with derision, and moth
ing seemed OF the slightest Importance
in his ewes but the monarchical pomp
he had witnessed in the Old World.
He concluded that he must have big
palace. a throne. "a jeweled crown, an
army, more lackeys, etc,,, and bigger
salaries for every body. At the last
session of his Legislature he forced APP
propriationsyth that exceeded his possible
revenues in the sum of 5000, 600 For
every dollar he raises by taAation he
must raise another bysa loan. His ma
tive subjects pay no taxes. His salary
was increased to $4,000 per annum,
or 81 for every,man. woman and child
on the island. In add ton to this he
has 5000 per an1um for ''iis
Queen $4,000 for his l..'heir appa-
rent" $1,000 for his Lord Chamber
lain. and s 10000 for bis household ex-
penses. Cne of his bills. amounting to
81; 700, was paid. The colored LADY,,
related to him gets $4,000 per annnn.,l
and another one S6, 900 per annum.
His royal guard costs $40, OoO per an
mum. For police, rags, bands salutes.
arms, soldiers, II assistant guards, = and
three Sheriffs he was allowed S31a, 900,
His Prime Minister. his Minister Of
Finance, Attorney 6 eneraI, NJ mister of
Fore gn Affairs, and his Chief-Justice
were voted $4,000 apiece, and This
Auditor General and two Associate
Justices s IL, 900 each. HsP Postmaster
General only gels $1,000. His "tour
around the world was paid for to the
extent OF 5000. Twenty Judges,
ten Governors, and a legion OF m nor
eaters, come in for salaries, ranging
all the way from $1,000 to $4,000 each.
AS about all the money, raised by taxa
ton in Hawaii. comes out OF the pock-
cts OF American and European busi-
ness men in Honolulu, it may be-
imagined that the Kings folly creates
Indignation. It is suggested that the
business men Of Honolulu ought to fire
his ebon hided majesty out.asof the.
archipelago and organize Territorial
Government under the protection Of.
the United States. 5s j.
St. Landry democrat., 1883-03-17
| drawiInre,.-room cars, and fused over as


drawing-room cars. and fused over as
though she was one of the, greatest
ladies in the land; and. before she came
to herself enough to st up. there was q
purse made up for her, of more dollars
tn N She ever had in her life, and that
wa mt all, for Mr. Runals the director.
that was aboard the train--found that
she knew son ething of telegraphy, and
put her in the office at C----for awhile.
and in a ew months gave her a steady
job. So you see it wa MT bad ride for
her, a ter all. ''sit ly4 .
But what became Of herp' I asked.
. Is she still in the ottcep'' .5a I
''Oh, bless you. no, sir. She did what
most all the women do, sooner or later
get married" ,@5 t3.
..Well," said +. s'such a women de-
served a good husband; I hope she got
one. ''.1;f. si}ls{f s{.,tg@ .5s IS
We'll, Idon't know: pretty middling.
| guess, and then he nodded, with a
laugh: '.She seems to be satisfied, SO /
suppose there no occasion for any one
else to find fault" s9ttzas tssg.
Just then there was a whistle, and
the down train came into view, and,
putting his pipe in his pocket. the en-
gineer made ready for his homeward
trip, saying, with SLY smile. as he
sprang on the engine and said good by:
IF ever you come to Concord / shall
be glad to see you, and you can ask my
wi what she links of the husband
Miss Ford got ''--Ratlou's Monthly. /.
St. Landry democrat., 1883-03-17
The OuaiI.Eater.

The quail-eating contest in New York
two quails day for thirty consecu-
tive days-created considerable interest
throughout the country. "A week ago
to-day a lean, sad-eyed man called at
the desk of q Vine street restaurant, and
said to the honest German who was in
charge:
Il can eat tho hind sights right often
iWalcott.'' vli -,sft,{t(s4s
las !. Watts dot you say?'' },s
ft'I say can eat the hind sights right
often that fraud in New York, who is
tryin to eat two qpails day ior thirty
consecutive days w. @'4ss
81 bate you on dot, and the German
went down for his roll.
q How much VII YOU bet Ican't do
it." said the sad-eyed man. sss szsss t
~ bate you'll two, dree, six, several
tollars.' 3.s..zss9s
:. Make it ten and I'll 90 YOU
The German wanted to put up the
money, but, the sad eyed man not hav-
ing the amount with him compromise
was fixed up on the basis that the sad
eyed party was to eat four quai $ a day
instead of two, each mar being put on
his honor as tothe stakes. i3s.t
.Ven you gommences'' ~ asked the
German, who was radiant over the i'm
mense odds which he had obtained in
the compromise.
Any time right now, if you say
SO. IL:
ayl" Four broile gwail. right away.f
quick called out the German to his
cook.
The ouailsi were produced and the
sad eyed man qu 5ckly disposed of them.
together with two cups OF coffee and a
dish OF French pease.I j:g.s..,z...
He called the next day and ate four
more. with several extra s;de-dishes. z Y
Next day the same. 81 So. tys!ssfsxs
Same the next day. IN,
People began to drop in to see the sad
eyed man eat. 8 N993.s 81
Yesterday the restaurant man hailed s
an Enquirer reporter as he was passing
his place. and said: sea il
i want you to g;fe dot loaver plast
in der papers. =
What loaferp" 8s@
dot son ov a gun dot bate me zen
tollar he eat four gwail day for thirty
respectable days.
ibid he win9"
III HotGiuSS. 11c LccA Won sCuW III
der! Ober he coonls in mine house
again. / schlag him NIT pungstarter.
Our German friend was too much ex-
asperated to proceed .intelligently; but
his clerk explained that the sad-eyed
man called regularly for four days, eat
ing four quails each day, together with
ct ceteras. and on departing the fourth
day paused on the threshold, bowed
low to the proprietor, praised his excel
lent cooking, said he would take pleas
ure in recommending our place to his
friends. and promised to see us later.
''when. quails are ripe next year, = and
he was gone. II
..Dot's itn' exclaimed the frenzied
and gapoplectie proprietor; .'dofs it.
und want you to gifc him p'ast in
Der Cincinnati Easquarea.''
The reporter promised that the En-
quirer would give him 4 broadside that
would lift him clear out Of water. = Gin
ciuasati Enquirer. 55.5., 5ass Il.
St. Landry democrat., 1883-03-17
an UNFINISHED POEM By BRY-

f4 .g3 4 esEg
The reader of Mr.. Bryant's poems will readi-
" remember the many verses addressed to his
wife, such as oh Fairest of the Rural
Maids, written about the time Of their mar
me union ct their spirits in the worla to come;
she - ick-Red, describing an illness: - The
T LIFE Ih.t ls reioe ng in recovery: The ne
Mrs. Bryant: "October, 1885," descriptive Of
her death aad bur al; and May Evening q
bess to her 0s But n
com ng biography of the poet fragment was
found aIn3ng his papers, which rec Ills her
after hsr very ende nes way ysass
and uncorrected; but we cannot refrain from
giving them US they were written-dated RIOS
lyn, 1875" t,sh sf
The morn ha.h not the glory that it wore,
Nor doth the day SO beautifully die,
Since Lean call thee to my side no more,
To gaze upon the sky. ..sssaa4
For thy dear hand with each return of spring..
sought IN sunny hooks the flowers she
dseek them still, and sorrowfully bring i
The choicest to thy grave.
Here, where sit alone. is sometimes heard.
From The great world, whisper OF my
name, s,p53s5,> VI III ~
Joined, ,. happy, to some KIND, commencing
By those whose praise is fame. .ss .lsss.s
ANA tnen, as II tnOugnCe tnOu SLlIl vert nigh,
lturn me, half forgetting thou art dead,
To read the gentle gladness thine eye gk4
That once might have, read.
turn. but see thee not: before my eyes
The image of hillside mound appears
Where all of thee that passed not to the skies
Was laid with bitter tears.
And I, whose thoughts go back to happier
DAYS fs55ffi5ss ysi gEg9a7a
That fed with thee, would gladly now resrn
All that the world can give of fame and praise
For one sweet look of thine. 8al 4s4t
Thus. ever, when read of generous deeds. II
Such words as thou didst once delight to
hear. Mt 58 OH 30 "a wv Il. 6J5
Ny heart is Wrung with anguish as it bleeds
To think thou art not near S BIT IL
And now that can talk no more with thee
OF ancient friends and days too ar TO last,
A bitterness blends with the memory
OF all that happy past.
oh, when L.
--Cenf,fru Mnnnzins
St. Landry democrat., 1883-03-17

"A pine tree was lately cut on The
Abial Merrill lot at Topsham, Me-,
which surveyed 4. 4sO feet.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-02-09
THE SERVANT GREATER THAN
HIS LORD.

The universal regrets that have
been expressed in all parts of the coun.
try over the defeat of Senator Win.
dom, of Minnesota, have brought Out
some good guesses as to the cause
For example, here comes the New
York Times and openly charges that
the Minnesota Senator's failure to get
reelected is due to his having built a
fine residence in Washington, and that
he is no longer considered resident
of that State.
Perhaps rich Senators and Represen-
tatives are making a mistake in build
ing their own houses in Washington.
as the most of them now do, and it
would be better for them il they lived
from hand to mouth at boarding
houses. It does look, when Senator
is transferring his domicile from his
State to the national capital, as if he
regarded himself as the legatee of his
Office for all time to come. 1t is the
fashion now for wealthy Congressman
to own house in Washington, and it
is convenient, too, when the sessions
last nearly the year round. If the de-
feat of Mr.. Window is traceable to
this course alone, it will be likely to
depress real estate in Washington, and
Mr.. Blaine, John Sherman, Ben Butler.
and all the rest of the Presidential
candidates will take warning. and
offer their palatial residences for sale.
ECef1i11g Journal.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-02-09
STRAY NOTES BYA WAYFARER.

The community is agitated just now
on the question of the Circuit Judge.
They want the election of judge taken
out of politics. They may plan and
scheme and call out candidates, but
the question will be just where it is as
long as judges are elected. The only
remedy is to appoint judges and keep
them in Office as long as they can per-
form the duties justly and honorably.
OF course the remedy will not be ap-
piled. We are not going to give up the
right Of choosing our judges. And yet
our choice consists in voting for the
man chosen for US by political man
ayers.
Another question on the tapis is an
evil brought into view by the tramp
law. Abuse is poured out on justices,
sheriff and constables, in no measured
terms. / do not see what right tax
payers have to grumble. 1t costs con-
siderable to get to be sheriff, and if he
pays to get into Office, he of course
makes the Office pay him il he can.
But pay a salary to the sheriff for
county business, letting him still get
fees in civil suits. Instead of paying
board for prisoners make a diet table,
and the Board contract to have the
meat, bread, ETC., supplied to the
sheriff. and-but we won't do it, some
of US may want to be sheriff, you see.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-02-09
POPULAR EDUCATION.

The bill now before the House of
Representatives, appropriating ten mil.
lions of dollars per annum for five
years for the purpose Of aiding in the
removal of illiteracy where it exists,
is one that ought to pass. The last
census reveals the absolute necessity
of some aid being rendered by the
General Government for the education
of the people, especially in the South
ern States, where the number of illit-
crate persons has been greatly aug
mented by the enfranchisement Of the
colored men. The pending bill is a
good one, because it is mere tempo
rary expedient to bridge the matter
over and render assistance to those
who are unable to help themselves I'M
til some better and more permanent
means can be provided. The fifty
millions that will be disbursed in five
years, if the bill finally passes, is mere
bagatelle to the National Treasury,
while it will infuse new life into the
educational interests of the whole
country, especially in those sections
which need it most.
| But, curiously enough, the objections
to the bill come mostly from sections
that would be mostly benefited if it
should become law. A Democratic
paper before us objects to the passage
of any such bill because it is the duty
of every State to educate its own chill
dren, and if every State performed this
duty there would be no occasion for
the nation to assume the burden"
Both terms of the proposition are
illogical. 1t is not the duty Of every
State to educate its own children indie
pendent of help from the Federal Gov
eminent, because every citizen Of the
State is also a citizen of the United
States, and the parent Government has
as much interest in him as the State,
and, in some respects, more interest.
Nearly every State in the North, and
every one in the West, has been aided
by large donations of land from Con-
gress for the benefit of education,
and a donation of the public domain
for such a purpose is as unconstitu-
tional as an appropriation of money
| would be. eff every State performed
it's duty" quoth our contemporary. =" in
this respect, there would be no neces-
sity for the nation to assume it. .
Granted. But every State does not do
it's duty in this respect, hence it be-
comes the duty of some other author
ity to see that citizens of the United
States are not illiterate. Chicago
Journal.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-02-09

part of the basement was also used
for a public school room. Louis P.
Harvey, afterwards Governor of the
State of Wisconsin, taught a branch
Of the public school in the basement.
In the year 1855 the church building
was moved from its original location
to the lot on which it was when burned
on Sunday last; it was then enlarged
by an addition on the rear end. and
otherwise improved. The following
clergymen have occupied the pulpit of
this church in the order of their ap-
pointment; w. II. Samson, 1s4S; H
Crews, 1914; w. Oliver, 1915; John
Chandler, 1916; Abram Hanson, 1S47-
1s48; A. N. Lehigh, 1s49; A. 2. Allen
1850; w. Fl. Sampson, 1851; Silas
Scarf, 1852; S. Stebbins, 1853; S. W
Ford, 1S54-1S55; DR.. Hull, 1855; N.
Green, 1S57-1S5S; G. Fellows, 1859
R. B. Pease, 1850; A. F. Mead, 1895;
1. A. England, 1869; E. D. Huntleyr
1870-1S71; G. A. Smith, 1S72-1S73
o. NJ. Thayer, 1874; w. E. Walker
1875 1876; S. Halsey, 1871 1879; ]. L
Hewitt, 1sSO-18S1; r. w. Bosworth
1882.
[NoTE-The record from which
names and dates are copied is perhaps
somewhat defective.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-02-09

There is prospect that the already
tax-ridden people of New York city
are to be still more heavily burdened
under the democratic home rule re-
gime. A bill has Leen passed adding
$750,000 to the taxation for increase of
pay for policy and fremen, 100000 for
the pay OF police matrons, and bills
are reported for appropriations of
$4,000 for the adult blind, 500, 900
for a new armory, $4,000 for a new
police station, and large sums for the
alleged services of an assistant alder
man, increasing the pay of court in
terpreter, to build a new hall of rec
ords, providing for a new public park.
and for increasing the number of DO
licemen. 1t is expected that all these
bills which seem to have good show
for being passed will increase the tax
alton not less than four or five mil
lions of dollars. To make it less easy
to meet these heavy accessions to the
city taxes, it is proposed to pass an
excise bill which will reduce the reve-
nue. from that source by providing for
the transfer of licenses, and prohibit
ing arrests for violations of the excise
laws except by the issuance of war
rants. These are some of the beauties
of the rule of party which boasts
that it is the party Of retrenchment
and reform. What a privilege to live
under such prudent government!