davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
A Parsons Retorts.

Father Stimson, an aged Kansas par
son, owned a good horse. but the keep
ing of the beast was somewhat OF
drain on the dominie's pocket. and he
was in the habit of dropping hint to
his Pensioners once in while that a
little hay would be acceptable. One
day a church member asked him to
bring Mrs. Stimson to dinner. Ser
tainly," said Father Stimson. "and as
it's haying time, / guess I'll put some
hay on the wagon when / go back
home" "All right, father" replied
the church member; "but bring a one
horse wagon" Father Stimson took
his wife to dinner in a wagon with an
ample hayrick that would hold hay
stack. ''See here" said the parishion-
er, as he helped Mrs. Stimson out of the
hayrick," you said you were going to
bring a one-hOrse wagon, and now
you've appeared with the most capa-
cious hay apparatus ever saw" 80,
I've brought the. one-horse wagon"
said Father Stimson; ''but the hayrick
that's a two-horse hayrick." He
drove away after dinner with twenty
two hundred pounds of hay.
dISOu StlLuSOu w DIS Ouc ilISt w uSo
gospel-tents in the West. He put them
up himself. A fellow who passed him
one morning as he was hard at work
on his tent called to him in loud voice,
"Hallo, there! Are you going to have
circusp'' .'Yes,'' said the parson,
continuing his work without looking
up; .'and Pm looking for a baboon.
Don't you want to hire yourself to
meP''
The parson was chaplain in the war.
The colonel of his regiment was fond of
leading the soldiers through deep pud-
dies at the regular drill, and the chap
lain one day rode around the puddle
and thereby fell out of the regular order.
The colonel noticed it, and at The close
of the drill, when the officers came to-
gether, said, with sheer, IF Chaplain
Stimson is afraid to ride through mud
dy water for fear of soiling his clothing,
1 will carry him across the puddles my
self" "Thank you," the chaplain
said; "but as the Government provides
horses. don't see any reason why ]
should ride on jackass."
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
Boast Pig.

Says the Atlanta, Ga, Constitution:
At dinner the other night, after the
trash had been disposed of, two roast
pigs, each with an apple in his mouth
were brought in and set in front Of the
host and hostess. had not seen such
a thing in years, but it was savory re-
minder of many lavish board under
which my youthful legs had twined
about each other other in ecstasy, The
late Senator Hill loved nothing so well
as plate of chitterlings. have seen
Governor Herschel V. johnson eat
pigs ear with infinite relish. What
were Governor Browns collards Il re-
fuse to spell it coleworts) to that great
and good man if underlying historic
love for this fine esculent there was not
an unconfessed love for hogs jowl?
Governor Stephens dotes on broiled
ham, and the nearest to death General
Toombs ever came was from indiges-
ton caused by over-eating of head
cheese; SO that q little more hogs head
might have prevented secession. More
than one historian holds that Lees
army was never whipped until the bacon
had given out and it had to fall back on
beef.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
Mexican Cruelty.

An Austin man who made a pro-
longed trip through Mexico gives the
Texas SUtiaags some interesting details
of his trip. He says that when he was
in the city of Mexico he was shewn
through some of the old buildings, con-
vents and jails that were erected by the
Spaniards. In the wall of one of these
ancient buildings he noticed a small
opening, and he naturally inquired of
his Mexican guide what it meant. He
was told that it was one of the buildings
in which criminals were walled up
alive.
What was the use of that hole in the
wall?'
"Well, Senior, you see, as long as the
prisoner lived his food was handed in to
him on a plate and be handed the emp
ty plate back, but whep he handed the
plate back with the food on it I'M
touched, then the jailer knew the pris-
oner was dead already, and didn't give
him any more"
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
The Way Convicts Are Controlled in the
Nahraeka panifcnfiaxu


In conversation with reporter for
the Omaha Herald, discharged con-
Wet told of his life in the prison at Lin
coin. When asked what was done when
a prisoner refused to work he said:
"Then you are ordered to No. No.
We call it the hole 1t is a bare cell,
except for bucket and kit of water
You get two or three ounces of bread
twice day and all the water you like
to drink. Several doses of house mix
ture are given you. not because you are
sick, but as punishment. 1t is COM
posed of ipecac and some other ingredi-
ents that do not know, and makes you
as weak as kitten. 1t is the favorite
remedy for all sickness in the prison.
Then you are trussed, pair. of hand
cuffs being put on with your hands be-
hind you and drawn up as tightly as
you can bear it by a rope running
around your neck. Your hands are only
let down to allow you to eatyour bread.
after which they are drawn up again
The line throws all the strain upon the
shoulder blades, and often after man
is let out he carries his hands behind
him Is or 20 minutes, trying to get them
down and straight.
''Who are subjected to this disci-
pline?'
''Short term men, usually, for they
don't care. The life, or long term, con.
victs are the best behaved, because they
have some hope of getting out. There
was one prisoner while l was there last
SUMNER bank burglar-who stayed
in the hole nine days and ten nights
that is the limit-and then was ordered
out by the physicians. Yet he would
not give in Most men give in in three
or four days. There is an old Winnie.
bago Indian, Scott-he is committed fol-
murder-who will every once in while
throw down his tools and put on his car
and coat and say me no more workee
any longer, put me in hole They put
him in for 2 or 8 days and release him
on their own account, for he would stay
until he had to be carried out if they left
him there.
"You don't propose to get in the way
of being sent to the penitentiary again?"
'No, sir. Once in a life time is often
enoughp''
The released convict comes out of pris.
on in good health and muscle, and pro-
poses to 60 back East and take new
start in life.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
WHAT THEY SAY ARoUT TT.

Mess. Robinson & Hixrichs:-We tax.
this means of attesting our high opinion
of Hinrichs' american Corn Cure. Our
opinion of its value in removing Cor7as
and Warts is based on the fact that we
have used it and have found that it will
do just what You claim for it. As cure
for Corns and Warts it is deserving OF
the highest praise. and we take pleasure
in recommending it to su who are aff1ict-
ed, knowing that it will effect cure in
every instance.
Yours respectfully,
Fl. D. SMALLEY, Justice of the Peace.
HUGH MORRISON, City Marshal.
r. D. SMART, County Judge.
G. 81. SCHMIDT, Editor Nord Westen.
FRED. HEINEMAN, City Clerk.
@. 8. CANRIGHT. HENRY BURCHERDT.
A. D. SMITH. 81. KLTNGHcLZ, oil.
E. BRANDEIs. ROYAL SNIFFIN.
JOHN PTTz. FRANK A. MILLER.
J. P. REINDL. WIN. RUNaE.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
A Practicable Scheme for Saving.

Four hundred Harvard professors and
students formed cooperative society
nine months ago, and opened store,
where books, sporting articles, station
cry, fuel, pictures and clothing were
either kept in stock or sold by sample.
The price of everything was five per
cent above wholesale cost and members
could buy, but on no other terms than
cash down. They also paid 81 a year.
The experiment has thus far been high
ly satisfactory, and no reason for fall
ure in the future is apparent. There is
no capital at risk, the five per cent. and
yearly dues cover the expenses, and the
members, now increased to $50. get
their supplies at an average of twenty
per cent. less than they would have to
pay elsewhere. A novel branch of the
business is the sale of secondhand
books and furniture, by which students
get pay for their discarded things, in
stead of throwing them away.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
Claiming Her Riphts.

A girl walked into an elevated rail-
road train last night at about six
O'Clock, while was going up town,
saws a writer in the Brooklyn Eagle,
and went from one end of the car to
the other glancing sharply at the faces
of the men who monOpoliZed all the
seats. She was evidently factory or
shop girl, and looked weary. She had
q clear cut and resolute face and was
dressed prettily. The nen stared at
her as she walked down the car and
watched her covertly when she turned
around and started back. She stopped
in front of an elderly man with rather
a good-natured face and said to him
clearly and with quiet firmness:
THAT seat was intended for q wom-
an. Give it to me-"
He looked into her clear, if somewhat
tired, eyes and said as he moved slight
ly:
IL don't see-er-how you"
"Give me that seat" the girl said
quietly, and he rose and gave it to her
with some embarrassment. She sat
down and began to read book she car
ried with her lunch basket, and paid
not the smallest attention to anyone in
the car. The little incident created the
greatest sensation imaginable, and men
talked of it to each other so long that a
woman with a baby stood awkwardly
holding on by the strap for some time
and no one offered her a seat. Then
the girl with the clear cut and resolute
face called her and compelled the wom-
an to take her seat. The men in the
ear gazed steadfastly out of the win
dows and tried to look unconcerned.
I've no doubt whatever that they were
willing to give up their seats to her. l
know that / was, but somehow felt
that l would look rather foolish if l did,
so l sat still in selfish solidity. The
girl glanced about once more, crossed
the car, touched small man on the
shoulder and said, in the same low tone
of voice:
"rl trouble You for that seat,
please
"Oh, certainly, madam cried the
little man, nervously, and sprang away.
All of which strikes me as being decid-
eddy droll now, though it was quite So
rious then. 1t suggests an idea. Why
don't women form themselves into a
Seat-Seeking Protective union and car
" the war into every car?
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

THE use of Elys' Cream Balm, sure
cure for Catarrh, Hay Fever and Cold in
Head, is attended with no pain, moon
venience or dread, which can be said of
no other remedy. Price 80 cents.
Apply into nostrils with little finger.
An invaluable article. An article like
Elys' Cream Balm has long been desired,
and now that it is within the reach of
sufferers from Caterrh, Hay Fever and
Cold in the head there is every reason to
believe they will make the most of it.
DR.. W. E. Buckman, W. e. Hannah,
Druggist, and other Eastonians have
given it trial, and all recommend it in
the highest terms.-EastO,s. Pc, Daily
argus. Oct. Z, 1879.
am convinced that Elys' Cream Balm
is cure for Catarrb, Hay Fever and
Cold in head. Many cures have been
made among my customers. G. T.
KIRBY, Druggist, Towanda, Pa.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
Temper of Cream.


The tempering of cream is one Of the
most important operations in butter
making. This is especially true in cold
weather. The different parts Of cream
are affected differently by heat A can
of cream may be placed in kettle of
hot water and heated till the thermom-
eter indicates 62deg. to 65deg. without
having heated the butter globules in the
cream at all. This win not ordinarily
be the case, it is true, but it is liable to
be, and it is approximately so in all
cases where the heating is rapid. Cream
should be kept warm for several hours
before churning that it may become
warmed through. Or, if it is necessary
to temper it hastily, it should be raised
considerably above the churning tenn
perature and suffered to fall back, which
it will do in short time.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
How Man Blew His Head Off With Wa

At the inquest held upon the body of
Felix Everarts, the tailor, the jury rem
dered verdict of suicide. A theory Is
to the direct agent of the suicide and one
of which meets with general belief is that
Everarts loaded the pistol which he used
with heavy charge of powder, and up
on it poured in a charge of water, the
two charges being separated by thick
wad. To this powerful auxiliary only
can the terrible mutilation of the sui
eidc's head be ascribed, A better opin-
ion of the force of the water can be
formed when it is stated that the entire
crown of the mans skull was found fifty
feet distant from the spot where he fell
and pieces of the skull were never dis
covered. Besides, it was shown on ex-
animation at the morgue that the dead
mans skull was more than a quarter of
an inch thick. 1t is stated that Everarts
has three grown daughters on the New
York stage.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

Victor Hugo was once declaiming on
the unity of race and the equality of
man, with that pardonable exaggera-
ton that is so characteristic of him,
when one of his hearers thought to con-
fuse him by asking him how he would
like to hold mulatto grandchild on his
knee. 81 should not like it, he repli-
ed. ''But would not prevent a mar
rage between daughter of mine and q
negro; and should reflect, if such a
marriage took place. that in the third
generation touch of the tarbrush is q
beauty"
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

Herr Won Gossler, Prussian Minister
of Education, has issued circular or
dering that all the boys in the higher
schools of the country shall be made to
play games. For some time public
opinion in Germany has been much ex-
ercised about the physical condition of
the boys; they were good scholars, but
listless, inactive. unenterprising, often
appallingly short-sighted. A remedy
is to be sought, not only in gymnastics,
but in cricket and football and other
outdoor games requiring skill and agili-
~. 1t is wise ruling.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

A gentleman living on John street
paid his grocery bill on Monday all in
pennies, there being $500 of them, a
WATERFALL more than full, weighing A
pounds in all. The grocery man
s.kicked'' at having to take the coin,
but be received them and turned them
into the bank. The next day he was
skirmishing ground among the stores in
the vicinity to get enough pennies to
uake change with.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
The Waltz,

One of the best of the poetical dia-
tribes directed against the waltz was
from the pen of Sir w. Chords friend,
Sir H. Englefield.
"What! the girl adore by another embraced?
What! the balm of her breath shall another
man taste?
What pressed in the dance by another man. g
knee?
What: painting rec]ine on another than me?
Sir, she's yours; you have pressed from the
grape its fine blue;
From the rosebud you've shaken the tremu-
lous dew:
What you've touched you may take. Pretty
waltzer-adieu!"
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

A VExED CLERGYMAN.-Even the pat
fence of Job would become exhausted
we're he preacher and endeavoring to
interest his audience while they were
keeping up an incessant coughing, max
ing it impossible for him to be heard.
Yet, how very easy can all this be avoided
by simply using DR.. Kings New Discov-
cry for Consumption, Coughs and Colds.
Trial Bottle given away at Robinson and
Hinrichs' Drug Store. 2
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
S. B. SHER0OD,
EEN'L LAND AGENT.

Hasfor sale Farms and Lands in the Counties
of ManitOwoc, Calumet. Brown, Door &C., WIS.
Also lots and houses in the City of Manifawoc
Wis.
Also. 5000 acres Of good Pine Lands IL
Marathon Chippewa, Ashland, sc, counties Is
Also about 1000. 900 acres of Burlin2 ton
No River Il. X. Co.'S Lands in the Southern
part of the State OF Iowa and the Southeastern
Dart Of the State of Nebraska, on 10 years time
with six per cent interest. Persons wishing TO
huy or sell Farms, Lands and Lots, or wanting
20 employ an agent in any business OF land
matters. viii please give me call, in person
Or by letter, at the Williams House, ManitoWoe
qmarChI6 IL
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
RuCKLEN'S ARNICA SALVE.

DOOIA1IIAN ZA1sANIOA1 t11116
The best salve ia the world for cuts,
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever
sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains,
corns, and all skin eruptions, and posi-
lively cures piles. 1t is guaranteed to
give perfect satisfaction or money re-
funded. Price 25c per box. For sale
by Robinson & Hinrichs. 16mar03
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
New York Weekly Herald.
One Dollar a Year.

The circulation of this popular newspaper is
constantly increasing 1t contains all the leading
news of the Daily Herald and is arranged in ham
dy departments. The
FOREIGN NEWS
embraces special dispatches from all quarters of
the globe. Under the head OF
AMERICAN NEWS
are given the telegraphic dispatches of the week
from all parts of the Union. This feature alone
makes
THE WEEKLY HERALD
the most valuable chronicle in the world, il is
the cheapest. Every week is given faithful re-
port of
POLITICAL NEWS
embracing complete and comprehensive de prach-
es from Washington, including full report 2 be
of the hour.
THE FARM DEPARTMENT
of the WEEKLY HERALD gives the latest as we'll
as the most practical suggestions and discoveries
relating to the duties of the farmer hints for rails
ing Cattle, Poultry, Grains, Trees, Vegetables,
&c, &c, With suggestions for keeping buildings
and farming utensils in repair. This is supple
mented by wel-edited department, widely cop
led, nnder the head of
THE HOME,
giving recipes for practical dishes hints for max
ing clothing and for keeping up With the latest
fashions at the lowest price. Every item of cook
ing or economy suggested in this department is
practically tested by experts before publication.
Letters from our Paris and London correspond
ents on the very latest fashions. The Home De-
partment of the WEEKLY HERALD will save the
housewife more than one hundred times the price
of the paper The interests OF
SKILLED LABOR
are looked after, and everything relating to me-
chanics and labor saving is carefully recorded
There is page devoted to all the latest phases of
the business markets, Crops Merchandise, &c,
&c valuable feature is found in the specially
reported prices and conditions of
THE PRODUCE MARKET.
Sporting news at home and abroad together
with story every week. sermon by somel emin
ent vine, literary. Musical, Dramatic, Personal
and Sea Notes. There is no paper in the world
which contains so much news matter every week
as the ''rEKLY HERALD, which is sent, postage
free, for One Dollar
You can subscribe at any time.
llG N. |. HtldlQ weekly form. Yl d IGdr.
Address, NEW YORK HERALD,
Broadway and Ann Street, New York
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

Scene, a butcher stand. Butcher
Come, John, be lively now; break the
bones in Mr.. Williams chops, and put
Mr.. Smiths ribs in the basket for him."
John (briskly), 'An right sir; just as
soon as I've sawed off Mrs. Murphy's
1ops
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

A small boy of four Summers was
riding on hobby horse with COM
panion. He was seated rather uncom-
fortably on the horses neck. After a re-
Elective pause, he said: Il think if one
OF US gets off could ride better.n
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
SCOyiill'S
and Liver
SYRUP.

a. peerless remedy fer ScrofEia, White
SgeI;sngs, cancer, ErysIpeIas, Cont.
GhTouic Sores. syphilis. Eussiors, Car
bu8cies. Salt isheum, Malaria. Bill
ous Complaints, and all diseases in-
oicati;g an Impure Condition of the
Bleed, Liver, Stomach, Bowels, Kid
ssess. Skin, etc. This Grand Remedy
il q Compound of vegetable extracts
tne chief Ofghich are SARSAPARlL-
Ia and sEEE4aENGsA. The cures eff
fecsed Ey C0v E'S BLOOD AND
EsyEEs SERUP are absolute. and
tsseiE record Is uEdissigured by fail.
ure. Cor sale by ali Druggists. Noe
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
= ATARRH DIRECTIONS.

Insert with little fin
ger q particle Of the
Balm into the nos
trils; draw stron &
breaths through the
nose. 1t will be alb
sorbed.
Ely'S Cream Balm
efectually cleanses
the nasal passages of
Catarrhal virus, caus-
ing healthy secre-
tions, allays infama-
ton, protects the
membrane from ad-
ditional colds, COM
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

1t was Douglass Jerrold who said: "a
man never so beautifully shows his own
strength as when he respects q woman $
softnessH
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

1t is estimated that every brick in q
building at Winnipeg, now in progress,
will cost 10 cents.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

AGEHIs wanted Books & Bibles
aw pce selling kst needed everywhere, Liberal tc.r
Vim. sSur~St-oz 3 10, NJ South Clam 81 thEseo ms
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

ENVELOPES, &c, &c.
We also have facilities for filling orders where
special ruling is desired and will meet demands
for such work promptly.
For Pamphlet and Book Work we have sew
eral styles of new type suitable for this class of
printing. Estimates will be promptly furnished.
Having three presses and steam power our IA
cilities for doing work expeditiously are unsur
passed. Orders by mail will receive careful at
tention at all times.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

p}etey heals the sores and restores the sense OF
taste and smell Beneficial results are realized
By few applications. thorough treatment Us
directed win cure catarrn, hay fever, etc.
Agreeable to Use.
UNEOUALED FOR COLD in the HEAD.
The Balm has gained an enyiabie reputation
wherever known, displacing all other preparations
Recognized as Wonderful Discovery.
Sold b. druggists at 30 cents. On receipt OF
price will nail package Send for circular CON
ta,nfng full information and reliable testimonials.
ELY CREAM BALM CO, owege, \. Y.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25
Book and Job PRINTING

Being now established in our new quarters in
Torrison's Block, north end of Eighth-st bridge,
announce to the patrons of THE Pnor and
the general public, that with increased facilities
for the rapid execution of job Printing,
fill orders with the greatest dispatch. The PLoT
Jobbing Department has recently been added to
by the purchase OF fast press, new type and
other material, and is now the largest and best
equipped printing office in the county.
Having the largest job press in the city we
fill orders for large jobs of fine printing, such as
DOUBLE-SHEET BLANKS,
INSURANCE POLICIES, &c,
as well as every description Of Commercial Print
ing, such as
BILL HEADS,
NOTE HEADS,
LETTER HEADS,
STATEMENTS, TAGS,
CIRCULARS, CARDS,
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-01-25

A LECTURE TO YOUNG lien
OS-EfEE LOSS OE