Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1883-10-26
FUN
Why the Bad Boys Pa Couldn't Get
Home.

Why the Bad Boys Pa Couldn't Get
Home.
"Oh, people are not all as good as you
and l are," said The grocery man, as be
watched the boy making a sneak on
bunch of grapes. but did you go to the
circus ?"
'Circus? Well, should assimilate.
And it is wonder I am not there yet.
But, whatever you do,don't ask pa If he
was at the circus. cause he will kill you.
GU see pa and I drove up to the race
rack, where the circus was, in the evening,
nd after the circus was out we waited to
b. the men take the tents down, and after
they had gone we started to drive home.
was darker than squaw's pocket, and
drove out on the race track, and the old
horse USED to be racer and he picked up
lIs cars. Pa took the lines and said be
would drive. cause we were out pretty late
and ma would be nervous. [ told pa |
didn't believe he was on the right road.
put he said he guessed nobody could fool
9him about the road to town, and bless me
If be didn't drive around that track about
eight times. Every time we passed the
grand stand: which pa coulpn't see on &C.
count OF his eyes, LATED but thought
If ne knew the road so COMPOUNDED we'll
could ride as long as be could.
AFTER we had rode around the track
about eight miles, and I was getting sleepy,
mildly suggested that we bad better stop
at house and inquire the way to town,
and pa got mad and asked me If [ took
him for fool. Then he drove around
couple of times more, and the man thu
keeps the track he came out with a lantern
and said Hellol' Pa stopped and asked
him what be wanted, and be said, On,
noihin',' and pa drove on and told him to
mind bis business. We went around the
track again, and when we got to the SAINT
place the man was there, and | guess D.
thought it was time to inquire the way, &c
he pulled up and asked the man what ht
was doing there, and the man said he was
minding his OWL business. Pa asked him
If we were on the right road to town, and
tbs man said if we wasn't in hurry he
would like to have US drive on the track
all night. as it was little heavy, and BIT
wanted to get it in condition to speed tht
colts the next day. but if we had to 90 W.
could drive out the gate and take tie first
left-hand road.
Well, pa was mad, and he wanted to
know why 1 didn't tell him we were OIL
the track, but told him he seemed t.
know it all, and it was dangerous to ad
wise man who knew it all. He didn't
speak all the way to town, but when put
out the horse be said 'Hennery, if this
thing gets out your pa will have the req
utation of being drunk. If you tell Of i,
you are no friend of mine.' So shall not
say anything about it, cause it is a bad
boy who will 60 back on his pa.''--Peck's
Sun.
AN AsToNIsHED EDIToR.-An ex-
change says: "We find upon our table one
of the newest of pictures. 1t is beautiful
Ill design. small, but showing great arts
tic skill in its make up. The prevailing
colors are green and black, the two blend
irg so tremendously that the effect is
pleasing in the highest degree. We shall
not, OF course. presume to give an exact
description Of this picture, but some of
the characters look so noble, so striking.
that we cannot refrain from describing
them. The head-center, or rather the hero
OF the picture, holds in his lett hand 2
banner. in his right hand sword; bis hat
is thrown on the ground. his head thrown
back altogether, his appearance is that OF
ole challenging another to mortal CON-
bat, waiting for the other fellow to knocl
off the chip. His eye is cast upward, rest
ing on the word f-hello, what's this +?
Great snakes if it isn't five-dollar billi
We took it for new kind of chrome
that had come in the mail. But we ser
how it is-either our devil has been rob
bing bank, or some delinquent subscriber
has been conscience-s stricken.
A Texas owl mistook a sleeping man
head for chicken, and fastened its claws
into his hair and scalp. "Well, what's :ht
matter now, old woman P" said the assail.
ed, as he awoke.
Roast beefmuttonandlamb," said the
gill wLs v ats On The table, at summer
resort. "W NJ said the old gentleman,
i've never tasted it, but you may bring
me some and Ell see what it is Ike