The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-02-02
The Murray Hill (S.Y.) Aristocraey.

The Murray Hill IN. ID Aristocraey.
Murray Hill, as you know, named
after one of the lucky ones who held on
TO his cabbage patch till the spreading,
growing town reached and absorbed it,
is not really hill, only little swell in
the land. But it is the highest point on
the island of Manhattan that is yet sub
dued 10 streets and brown-stone fronts.
And yet, low as it is. it is a height that
hundreds of thousands of brave hearts
have been broken to reach and hold.
How few, indeed, hold their place here
for any length of time, even after years
of toiling. stealing and struggling to
reach it.
When I first pitched tent in this town
one of the finest houses that crowned Muir
ray Hill and fronted Fifth Avenue was
held BY the man who "struck OIL" A
good, kindly man he was, too; and his
family of pretty children, born and
brought up since the flow of oil
on which he foated into power
and prominence, 1 found to be cul-
tured, refined and altogether love.
ly. But you seek for their family in
vain on Murray Hill now. Some drawer
or more reckless soldier in this mighty
commercial battle that wages here cease.
lessly has stormed their pretty castle.
carried it sword in hand, and the great,
gloomy and sullen old brown stone front
that knew my happy young friends
knows them no more. The man and all
his family have gone down in the fight.
In the roll call of fashion on Murray
Hill he answers not to his name. Killed?
Wounded? Prisoner? No one knows.
No one stops to inquire. He is missing
at muster-roll when fashion gathers her
votaries for the gay season. That is all.
That is the end.
And so it goes all the time. / know
another man who invented a patent
hinge. He bought house on Murray
Hill and gave gorgeous shows for full
two months. One day a suit was decided
the patent. The next week
his face was to be met with no more op
Murray Hill. Another man, who in.
vented patent screw, is established
there, and seems to be more fortunate
than his neighbor with the patent iron
hinge. He says he has screwed himself
on to stay.
OF course the great railroad light,
have set up their establishments here IN
force and numbers. As rule their fam.
lies are loud, vulgar and give big and
brazen shows. They fire their cards oil
invitation profusely at every available
man or woman whose name is conspicu.
Dus, without the least regard for the
fitness of things, or the laws of etiquette,
Or rules of introduction. What they
want is a ''iam," a crush, a crowd, rows
and rows of carriages, with a sprinkling
Of noblemen among their list of names
for the newspapers. Of course it makes
but little difference whether the noble
man be Italian, South American or En-.
glish. Really, my railroad lady doesn't
know the difference. Indeed, she has
not time to inquire about details. Here !
s the rapid transit idea: express time is
her husbands motto. "And after all |
Why isn't a boughten title as good as any
title? Wasn't they all boughten onst?"
But of all the new people intrenched
IN Murray Hill, perhaps the patent pill |
people are most perfectly secure. Pills
ire always at par. No frosts of winter
IAN effect the crop of pills. No foreign
can disturb them for
If President or Prime Min
ster is sick, no matter. Indeed, the
more sick people in the land the more
bills are in demand. l think the pill
people on Murray Hill, like the man
With the patent screw, have come to
tay. There are but five stately and
''houses" there now. Some
# these lordly 'houses'' intermarry
md co-mingle their ancient coat-of-
rms. Others, like the mighty houses
# the warEke Montagues and Capulets,
loid deadly feuds, which are to be
ought out to the bitter end in the patent
aw courts.
Some of the grandest carriages thai
oil on Fifth Avenue have been made
y their proprietors rolling pills. The
ill business is big business. 1t does
lot seem so in detail; but in the aggre-
ate it is immense.
eyes, hits purity good poetry, if
oes say it meself of what's me own,
Or we keeps our own poet" said the
immortal Mrs. Day, of Day & Martins
lacking, as she dropped courtesy be-
ore her guests when she had finished
eading some lines celebrating the shin
,g virtues of Day & Martin. And ]
'onder why some of these fabulously
ch pill people do not employ some of
8 poor rhymers to celebrate them in
,ng. l send these lines as an example
what might he done:
TO THE PRINCESS OF PILLS.
y beauty. surrounded by half the gay beaux
I Gotham, good sir, is the princess of pills.
ne is weighed down by diamonds as dews {
weight a rose,
ne is smothered in satins, in laces, and frills;
lie walks through the world with heaven.
ward nose, a
nd yet it's all pills, sir, nothing but pills.
Silks and satins and faces and frils,
FineFrench masters and milliners' bills, {
Pills, sir! moving and marvellous pills.
lie is wooed by dozen brave Counts who
propose
swallow her pills. her diamonds. her nose,
nd all at gup without sugar. For, oh! i
ley adore this fair girl, and her diamonds, so.
at only to think of it! Every bright Stone