Memphis daily appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1847-1886, 1883-07-15
THE FLIRT.
Privileged Beauties Of Gay Society
whom II Were Well to be q
Lille shy of.

San Francisco ArQondUt: No class OF the
women of The beau monde do more harm than
do those married women who amnse them
selves by carrying on Harmless flirtatiop,"
q designation which is a misnomer, for no
filtration can De harmless where one Of the
p%arties TO il is 3 married woman. There
may be nothing ess sntislly wrong in the af-
fair, no harm may accrue either 10 her or 10
the man upon whom she exercises her pow
era oil attraction, but her husband is made
unhappy, and she becomes the subject Of
unpleasant comment. 1t is frequently said
that pretty young married women are much
more attractive TO gentlemen thsn ii is posi-
bic for young ladies TO be. The reason as
signed for this is that men csn talk to them
with Iess restraint, can adopt toward them
a more free-and easy t0ue, which renders
them agreeable companions. The truth of the
matter Ia that men may with impunity lavish
upon married women attentions which, II
offered to single women, would be decidedly
commIttal; and as society men are not often
burdened with monsy, and are not prepared
to set up establishments of their own, they
avoid the society OF young girls, and join
the train Of eoAe gay young matron, are
contented with such crumbs OF comfort as
she sees fit to bsstow upon him. 1t is almost
iucomprehensible that any man of sense
should be willing TO become one of this retI-
nue., who are permitted to carry my lady's
shawl, or hold her fan, in return for assidu-
ous devotion; but they are lattered by sUch
distinction-it makes them fashionable. No
unmarried man should be blamed for carry
ing on a Irritation with a married woman,
when she takes the initiative; but a woman
should lie censured VINO, having voluntarily
exchanged the freedom Of girlhood for the
responsibilities OF a wife, disregards her
husbands claim upon her time and
l atlp1flnn and frTftArS them aWay in
a silly filtration with some man who, while
protesting ardent alteration secretly con-
dennis her, ana perhaps ridicules her al his
club. IL a WON an feels that she is unwilling
to reliDquish the attention which as a girl
was hers by right; that the devotion of one
mancan not compensate her for that which
she gives up in marrying him, she should
remain unmarried; but, being Marie lei
her content herself with the admiration oil
her husband, and cease 10 desire that Of other
men, l do not mean TO imply that because
a woman is married she should be isolated,
and in society be reIegated to the compar.
ionship OF her husband. There ia a certain
kind of attention to which married women
are entitled, and which they may receive
without provoking omment Talented, at.
~tractiye women may draw around them mer
Of intellect, we come them TO their homes, al
make themselves the center OF a cultivated
circle; may show that they take pleasure IL
their society, and may accept theil
chivslrous attentions in a pleasant
frank Manner, without being at al
ilrts,ious. But when married women per.
nit men 10 pay them fulsome compliments,
TO make lovellke speeches 10 them, and &c
show them marked attention, they deparI
from that matronly dignity which is one o.
their greatest charms. 1t is alleged by thos,
who seek to excuse the firta,ionso OF married
women that il is very hard for a married
woman h had once been II belle to dc
without admiration; and another excuse
that perhaps the husband is lacking ir
admiration, is uuintsrestiug, and 30 sh,
seeks the eompauionship OF men who are in
teresting. Although a gradual diminutior
Of affecIionate attention on the part Of tn,
husband is a great grief TO a wife il does no
warrant her in engaging IN a filtration ss a cur,
for ennui. There are other more eticaclouI
methods of dealing with recalcitran hus
bands, and while q loving wife who is neg
lected, always ELECTS sympathy, sympathy
gives place TO censure If she becomes
a dirt in order to avenge her wrongs
No woman whose love for her husband, i
true and deep will care for the attention o
other men; she may like to look well, ant
epdeavor to be bright and attractive in soci
ETY., but neither by word or look will she Ell
courage any approach 10 a Irritation. Wo
men who do encourage such advances havl
mucn to answer for; they not only wreck
their own happiness, buI they exert a PERM
cious influence over those with whom the
come in contact, and lower all women in tn
opinion of men. If a young man sees tina
his friends wife prefers his society 10 that O
her husband, he reflects that were ne to be
come a Benedict" in his turn, very proba
bly, his wife would prefer other men TO him
and be concludes that he is much happier a
a bachelor, spending his evenings in the so
cieiy of the wives of his friends, since h
is SO cordially welcomed. Married women
who are hfrtz, are often INSCRIPTIONS, AM
instead Of being the advisers and coadjutor
of young girls in society, they become thei
most dangerous enemies if they think thei
preservers sre being trespassed upon. Mar
ried women should be a power in society
they shoud take precedence of young girl
by reason Of their knowledge of the world
their Sauoir faare, their superior wisdom; bu
when they exchange the title of "Mad
enoiselle" for that of MADAME" they shoul
MAKE their tuielary divinity Pallas-Athen
instead of Aphrodite.