davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
Trayers and the Terrier.

A good story is told of William Il.
Travers, the stammering wit of Wall
street, New York. One day he met a
canine peddler, who offered to sell
Travers a beautiful terrier. but bred
50 fine as to be mere midget. Trav-
ers asked: "Wh-a-at is he g-g-ood
f-for?" "IIe is splendid ratter, Mr..
Travers," was the response, "We-ell,"
said Travers, "you bring him to my
h-house tonight and III b-b-buy him.
In the evening man and dog were at
Travers' house. In the center Of the
library was a porcelain vase covered
over with a cloth, and surrounding it
were score of personal friends.
"P-p-p-ut your d-dog in there" said
Travers. The owner of the valuable
purp did so, and awaited results. In
a few moments an unearthly shrek
came from the vase, and, looking down,
the company saw tinely-bred terrier
being shook at will by an enraged
rodent. The owner of the dog was
when Travers said:
"H-h-how. m-m-uch, did you say
you would t-t-t-ake for that d-d-d-og?'
Fifty dollars is my price, Mr..
Travers," was the feeble response.
"F-f-f-ifty dd-d-ollars for the
d-d-dog? Why, I'll SIS sell you my
r-r-r-at for t.t-twenty-f f-f-ive,"
Amid a peal of boisterous laughter
man and dog disappeared.
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
Married According to Shakespeare.

a Tennessee lawyer, in law book
recently published in that State, recon-
mends for solemnizing marriage the use
Of the form to be found in Shake
speare's The Tempest" and declares
it to be perfectly legal. The lines
begin:
A contract of true ltvs we ce'ebrate:
May you find that she will outstrip all praise,
And make it halt behind her; and may you
yond all limit of all else in the world
Forever love, praise and honor her.
She, with heart as willing
As bondage eer of freedom, gives her hand,
And your wife, in plain, holy innocence
SO perfect and so peerless-shall not wish
Any companion in the world but YOU
Nor in imagination for shape
Besides yourself to like off,
After this follows the benediction
bestowed upon Miranda by Prospero.
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
A Small BOYS Composition.

A "young idea,' of this city, says it
bores him awfully to write compost
tions, and he always writes them
short. We have obtained copy OF
his last, which is no less distinguished
for wit than for brevity.
THE Fly AND THE HORNET.
The Fly is Il domestic animal, he is
generally found near the molasses can.
the fly is a harmless animal, not being
furnished with as good weapons of de-
fense as the Hornet. They that flys
drink. have never seen hys that
were worse off for liquors, but | have
seen liquors worse off for flies. The
Hornet is a red-hot child of natur
He is always ready for action at any
time of the day or night. My advice
is to keep clear of the Hornet, as he i:
too sociable.-FranhJort (Ky.1 feo
man.
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
Influence OF Pictures,

A room with pictures in it and
room without pictures differ by nearly
as much as room with windows and
a room without windows; for pictures
are loopholeS of escape to the soul, lead
ing it to other scenes and spheres, where
the fancy for moment may revel,
refreshed and delighted. Pictures are
CONSIDERS of loneliness they are
sweet flattery to the soul; they are a
relief TO the jaded mind; they are
windows to the imprisoned thought
they are books, they are histories
and sermons, which we can read with
out the trouble of turning over the
leaves.
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
" Because I've got him snug in the

barn !"
Goodness, gracious then III
just"
lie is making his way to warn JUS
tice as fast as his weak legs will let
him, when l steady him against the
stable door and take away his cane.
"Dad,' | cry, savagely, IL adore
you, but if you take another step to
harm that man, why-you've only got
dozen daughters to 60 through the
rest of your life"
"YOu y gasps pa-and l wonder
the wisp of straw he has been chew
ing does not strangle him black on the
spot-"a thild of mine help thief"
Exactly and she means to make
you an accessory after the act. Now,
see here, pa, don't set up to be a
cherub, but when a fellow-creature,
starved and bleeding, asks me to help
him in the name of God, why l mean
to help him if 1 break every law in
Virginia to atoms--so there! y
Pa looks stunned bit-as I knew
he would -wavers bit, and then lay
ing one big brown paw on my head, as
l likewise expected, knowing pas
ways as do, cries stoutly:
"Spoken like a man, Sis; and now
let's have look at your villain"
When we stand at last before the
poor fellow, he looks 50 pitifully help
less stretched out there on the friendly
straw, that pas loving heart gets the
best of his law-abiding principles, and
he bathes the hurt arm as tenderly as
if it had never been raised in crime.
When pa first notices the Jug of
water l have brought from the spring
and the carriage-robe rolled up for a
pillow with the rough side in, he looks
at me wonderingly for a second, and
then calculates with most contented
happiness:
"Thank God, Sis, you are only a
woman after all r
1suppose pa means well, but it does
not sound encouraging considering Pve
been trying to do my duty like man.
Even fathers are human.
"It's no use" means the poor crea-
ture, when pa has done his best with
the wound. "Tm a goin' fast, boss,
but she said they should not-touch
me-"
"Don't worry, my lad" cries pa,
cheerily. Fright or wrong, here you
stay until"
1T won't be--long-I feel it comm
fast-and hard-I would have died out
there on the black roadside except for
her, God bless herl If you-don't
here he looks at me like
some gaunt, faithful dog, that ] lean
over him by pa to catch his dying
words if you don't mind-will you
take this bag from-around my neck?
1t chokes met chokes-"
"There, there" says pa, tenderly;
" and now, my lad, before you go to
sleep, tell me, does this money belong
to the bank?"
"Yes, yes" cries the dying man,
with an imploring glance at pa while
he tries to touch my hand With his own
poor, feeble fingers F.; "take it back,
fois, and tell them-tell them-that
the reward belong, to-her-"
X X X
Yes, that is the true and simple
story of my fortune, no matter what
The papers said. For long time pa
would not let me touch penny of
hat five thousand dollars, but the
people at the bank insisted that busi-
hess was business, | had earned the
money and there it was.
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
A Juveniles Query,

On a Boston street car the other day
a half dozen happy fathers were match
ing babies. To the ane dotes of prize
children a listener whose offspring had
grown to the age of talkativeness con-
tributed an account Of his boys ex-
perience in peeling an orange with his
thumb. With great difficulty the rind
was taken off, but tn remove the inner
lining or film without breaking into the
pulp was still harder. Finally, in
vexation, the little fellow cried
out Papa, what makes oranges wear
flannels 7"
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
WAITING.

wait,
Till from my yelled brows shall fall
This battling cloud, this wearying thrall,
Which holds me now from knowing all;
Until my spirit sight shall SEQ
Into all Beings mystery,
See what it really is to be!
Iwait,
While robbing days in mockery fling
Such cruel loss athwart my spring,
And life flags on with broken wing;
Believing that kindlier fate
The patient soul will compensate
For all it loses. ere too late.
Iwait!
The summer of the soul is long,
The harvests yet shall round me throng,
Its perfect pomp of sun and song.
In stormless mornings, yet to be,
I'll pluck, from life's full-fruited tree,
The Joy to-day denied to me.
Nary Clemmer.
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24
NO. 13
WILLOW.

Oh, slender willow, that beside
The meadow brooklet leanest hero
Sad in this joy-time of the year,
Dost cast gold catkins on the tide,
As strips the widowed Hindoo bride
Her jeweled arms, with grief ansters--
Oh, slender willow?
Or makest tickle haste to hide
The pale young sunshine's gifts, once
dear,
Ere beam more splendid shall appear,
To cothe thee all in yirdurols pride
Oh, slender willow?
&C. b. Sutton, in Atlantic Nonthly
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24

A sign-bOard can't tell everything
1t tabes an advertisement 70 do that
The banner-enterprise., 1883-05-24

Yes, that is the true and simple
story of my fortune, no matter what
the papers said. For long time pa
would not let me touch a penny of
that five thousand dollars, but the
people at the bank insisted that busi-
ness was business, | had earned the
money and there it was.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
HOW He WON HIS BRIDE.

Il tell you, sir, Indignantly exS
claimed Col. Webley, addressing a
young man who aspired to the hand
of bis only child, that shall never
give my consent to union which
| know would be unhappy.
I'VE love each other, replied
young Balehuff.
Love be eterually blowed So |
could have said years ago. | was
devoted to the woman married aud
she was devoted to me
You have lived happily with
each other, have you not 7
Happily the Colonel contempt
uousIy repeated. l didn't have mon
ey to insure happiness for even in
Arkansaw a man must have money.
But there's no use proloDging this
conversation. have told you that
you should not marry my daughter.
| shall keep close watch, and if |
see you here again | shall act with
violence.
We'll, Colonel, | am compelled to
adopt this last resort. Some time
ago before you suspected that | was
attached to your daughter, you bor'
rowed ten dollars from me. Do not
vince, sir; hear me through. You
thought that had forgotten the
transaction, but | haven't. Now,
sir, | intend to marry your daugh
ter. If you persist in worrying me
| shall dun you for the money every
time | see you.
The Colonel sat for a moment 10
deep thought Finally he said,
Say, Rob, don't say anything more
about the ten dollars lend me five
dollars and take the girl.-Ark0n-
SGw IraUeler
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
THE DIFFERENCE.

CA. NJ, the Atlanta correspond
dent Of the Telegraph and Messen-
ger, writes that paper the following
About ten years ago two young
men, in good circumstances; were
doing business in a town near At
laDta, each for himself. Soon they
were oversaken by the necessities of
fortune, and forced to Suspend
Both failed for sbout the same
amount. As it happened, their
principal creditor was one of the
largest firms in Atlanta. One of the
young men came here and effected
settlement with his creditors, pay
ing them % cents 10 the dollar, saw
ing enough to buy a comfortable
home in Atlanta, furnish it and a
healthy bank account besides. The
other young man, under the presses
ure, perhaps, of the early training of
honest but unworldly parents, came
to Atlanta and paid his creditors dol
lar for dollar, giving up everything
to the discharge of his debts. Both
young men settled in Atlanta, and
short while ago the last named, who
surrendered everything to bis credo
itors, applied to this big firm, whom
l mentioned before, for employment.
They turned him off, but the other
young mantle % cents 10 the
dollar young mau-was then in their
service at a salary of 5000 year.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

He CoNFEsSES THE DEED "A
few days since there appeared in the
Times an account of an accident on
the East Tennessee, Virginia and
Georgia railroad near Knoxville,
which was caused by some miscreant
who had turned switch wrong,
whereby the train was thrown from
the track, causing loss of thous-
ands of dollars. The officers of the
road Immediately secured the servi'
ces of detective, who went to work
to ferret out the::villain who commits
ted the diaboIical deed. Tuesday
night be arrested Bob Williams,
coIored man, who was at one time
section hand on the road. Williams,
after a time, confessed having turned
the switch, but refused to state bis
motives for doing so. He also im>
plicated q colored woman, who lives
near Knoxville, who, be alleges, as
sisted in the devilish work. He
said that he once wrecked a train on
a Mississippi road, and also wrecked
q passenger train on the Chesapeake
and Ohio railroad. Williams will
doubtless be tired of train wrecking
before he gets out of this scrape.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
TWO CoNvICTs EXCHANGE SEN
TENCES.

Houston, Texas, dispatch August
1st, says: One of the queesest cases
on record developed itself to-day.
Policeman Garhsm yesterday took
captured convict to Huntsville
peni,entiary and returned him to the
officers there. This morning Gar.
ham, having nothing to do, thought
he would call up Geo Hasselmeyer,
who had been sentenced ct the last
term of Harris county court to II
years 10 the peniteutiary for horse
stealing. Garham knew Hassel>
meyer. go when the convict who an
swered to that name was brought up
be was astopished TO tind that it was
not the same person who bad. been
sentenced under that mama. The
| penitentisfy warden insisted that it
was the only Hasselmeyer confined 10
the penitentiary, whereupon the con
vict seeing that further cOncealment
was useless, made a confession. 1t
seems that James Kennon, who was
sentenced at the same term OF court
as Hasselmeyer to three years, and
Hasselmeyer we're chaiue d together,
and on the way to Huntsville, Has,
selmeyer made the astounding prop
osition to Kennon that they should
change pames and terms. Hassel>
meyer Offering Kennon $1,000 to
work bis seventeen years sentence,
while he should work the three
years. sentence of Kennon. Ken
non accepted the proposition. When
HasseImeyer's name was called at
the penitentiary and be was told to
register. Kennon stepped forward
and declared that he was the man.
As neither the warden nor the guard
who brought the convicts to Hunts>
vile knew the names of the men,
the ruse was completely successful,
and had it not been for the mere
chance of Gsrham asking to see
HasseImeyer, whom he happened to
know, it is something that might
happen at any time, and yet none OF
the officers would be any wiser, as
they are not supposed to know the
convicts personally until after they
are registered at the penitentisry.
Hasselmeyer was found Ou convict
plantation working under the name
of Kennon. He has been working
outside of the walls, as the short
term prisoners are not so closely
confined and guarded as those in for
long term.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
LIVING TO PURPOSE.

Everybody ought to have an hon.
orable ambition and a supreme desire
to be and do something in life. 1t ia
better to aspire and fall than to have
no aspiratio, at all. There are fer
fewer who, having laudable ambi
too, fail to make their mark than OF
those who drift through existence
aimlessly, with no definite purpose
in view. There are persona who de
vote half their lives 10 trying to solve
the problem of their existence and
the other half 10 longing for some
friendly band or propitious circum-
stance to give them a shove in the
right direction. Much has been
said and written of wasted lives and
neglected opportunities, and yet the
subject is by no means threadbare.
Il is one of those accommodating
matters that will admit of slime upon
line and precept upon precept." To
live % purpose-high and noble pur-
pose Us an ambition worthy of all
men and women too. How to work
out destiny 80 that it may inure to
our own and the we'll being of others
is one of the most profitable themes
of contemplation Men like the stars
move in different spheres and orbits,
and to keep in place is highly im-
portaut. Fidelity to duty and sta
ton will enable any individual to
become houored and useful. Should
one of the small and comparatively
insignificant heavenly bodies attempt
to usurp the place of one of the bril-
lisn: planets, it would doubtless suf
fer for its pains and become the ridi-
Guile of its associate twinklers.
So with individuals. They often
miss the accomplish nent of any
grand aim because of failure to ap
prehend the plane on which they are
best fitted to move and shine. 1t is
not necessary to an hOnored and
useful life that one sbould be presi-
dent, or senator, or judge, or minis"
ter plenipotentiary. A man might
be either of these and yet possess no
Extraordinary intellectual or moral
weight. Yet il be adorns the place
by eminent fitness for it. he will cer>
tsinly command the respect of bis
fellows, and make the best of his op
portunities A constable might be
I a better and more useful man than a
king; go we see that place and power
are not always attended by the char
acteristics and principles which en-
title humanity to love and respect.
To make the best of the position 10
which one is placed, whether that
position be high or low, is the secret
of wise living. The palpable fault
with most of US is that we fail to
mske the best of our opportunities
and aspire to conditions for which
we are not fitted. An important
thing to be REM mbered is that char
acter is everything, and that without
the foundation of a good character
to build upon all efforts to iDspire
the confidence of others in our ca
pacity for honorable distinction will
become painfully abortive.-COIs'm-
bus enquirer.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
IMPROVED MACHINERY.

An up-country writer says: "Far.
mers are trying harder to prepare
land for improved machiuery."-
That is the right direction. Take
out the stumps and rocks, fill up the
sinks and holes, pad over the bitches
and stop the washes, and get ready
for the sulky breakers, and cultiva|
tors. This is putting at least five
laborers and their expenses into one,
with the prospect of better cuItiva-
ton and greater yield. We expect
to see the time when no thrifty far
mer will be found plodding knee
deep in the dirt and dew after the
pillow; but instead, he will be seen
With o clean shirt on his back, mOun-
ted on a model vehicle, behind
we'll bred farm horse, manipulating
the soil exactly to bis notion. Then
be will be "Lord of the Manor"
Fl0ridadn.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

The JUROR PLEADED Nor GUIL>
TY "A negro man was sworn in
upon the jury in larceny case a
few days ago. He looked very de
jected, and as soon as possible skunk
away into a corner Of the jury di
vision, aud bid his face from view.
Presently the Judge had occasion to
address the sable juryman, and, at
ter repeated attempts to attract bis
attention, had him punched in the
side, The juryman arose: DO you
know what you are here for 7 de-
handed the Judge, with severity.
Fore de Lord, boss, ! amt done
muffin.
Don't you know what case this
isf
Somehow / do disrecollect, said
the darkey scratching his head.
well, exclaimed the Judge, it's
the case where the men are accused
of stealing two bales of cotton!
Il didn't steal um ! was the excited
reply of the thoroughly bewildered
negro. The Judge explained the
matter, and the trial proceeded
Mobile Register.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
he WAS THE WRONG MAN

Several weeks ago, by special
enactment of the Legislature, the
governor offered Ie ard of 5000
for Arkansaw man who is not a
Judge, colonel, major or captain.
The next day a plain, unGssuming
man called upon the governor and
said i
Il have the honor, sir, to claim
the reward you offered for a man
who is neither judge, colonel,
major nor captain. | am neither
of these
4 am glad to meet you, sir, said
the governor. Just sit down q mo-
ment until | attend to little matter
of business
The man took seat and the gov
ernor went into an adjoining room,
and after a moment called:
Colonel
Yes, SIR said the gentleman,
arising.
That's all right remarked the
governor. Il see you are a colonel.
Porter, please show the military
gentleman to the door and admit
the next man.'-ArkGnSas0 Traveller.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

"Oh, my back !" is a common
exclamation and expresses a world
of misery and suffering 1t is sin
gular this pain arises from such va
rious causes. Kidney disease, liver
complaint, wasting affections, colds,
rheumatism, dyspepsia, overwork
and nervous debility are chief
causes. When thus siIing seek
prompt relief. 1t can be found best
10 Browns Iron Bitters 1t builds
up from the foundation by making
the blood rich and pure. Leading
physicians and ministers use aud
recommend it 1t has cured many,
Fand if you are Q sufferer try il.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

With the United States senate al
most evenly divided, with demo,
cratic working m ,jnrity in the house
of representatives, with democratic
governors, in twenty five out of the
thirty eight states, and with the
people everywhere anxious to cleanse
the corrupt departments at Washing
ton, nothing short of suicidal fully or
incapscity can prevent the democrats
from electing their national ticket
next year.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

TRUE CAUTION Ma said Jen
ME Par oenu at Newport, they said
those Smiths who have got the Jones
cottage are awful stylish and have
got pedigree Got the pedigree,
have they = said Mrs. Parvenu, ex
citedly 'well, you keep away from
them, for l don't want you to catch
IL
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

When a lady living ip Chelsea
sent to London for a doctor, she
spologiz-d for asking him to come
such distance Don't speak of it,
answered the NJ. D Il happen to
have another patient iu the neigh
borhood, and can thus kill two birds
with one stone. [Columbia Specta
fnr
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

The easiest way to get rich, says
Walton News, is to go to Lumpkin
county, buy ten acres of land, haul a
wagon load of dirt from a gold mine
near by. sprinkle it over your ten
acres, advertise it as a gold mine
aod sell for hundred thousand dol
lars.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
THE EARTHQUAKE,

LONDON, August 3.-Advices
from Casamicciola says that mum"
Der of English aud Americans have
arrived there in search of friends
and relatives who are supposed to
have been victims Of the calamity.
The syndicate states that 1000
are dead at Locco, 1000 at Fario,
and $500 at Casamicciols. The
damage to property is 1000, 900 lire.
Shocks of the earthquake have
been felt at WiesbaDden. The
Bishop of Casamicciola who was
killed by the earthquake last Sat-
urday night was MonsignOr MAJ
zeIls. who was recognized in Parti-
bus for bis service on the occasion
of the earthquake ct Cassmicciola
in 1881.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

MAN Who ROSE EARLY. old Mr..
s. came sauntering down to the
front gate night or two ago aud in-
terrupted a long conversation be-
tween his daughter and a very inti-
mate male friend:
"Why, pa" inquired the damsel,
amt you up late"
"Just got up" said the old gentle
man, shortly; Thought I'd come
down aud see the sun rise !"
And then the son rose from the
rustic bench and sadly hied bin
hOmewards.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
THE FATHER OF FIFTY SONS
Natchez Democrat.

Robert Wheeler, of Silver Creek,
was born in 1775 and is 108 years
old. His parents were of pure AT
ricau blood, and were captured on
the coast of Guinea and brought to
the country in slave ship, Bob has
had eight wives and fifty~four chill
dren, fifty of whom were sons.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09
Mr.. Hadlev. a TRAINER and fisher

Mr.. Hadley, a trapper and fisher
man living a short distance up on
the river from Montezuma, Ca,
catches quite q number of surgeons
weighing from so to $50 pounds
He extracts the oil, which is worth
50 on the market A large sturgeon
will yield several gallons of oil.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1883-08-09

While boring an srtesian we'll at
Waynesboro, Gs, sharks teeth were
taken from the we'll at a distance Of
400 feet. What seems to be the
sections of the backbone of shark
have been brought up also.