Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1883-03-03
SERMONS IN STONES.
And Bones, Cedar Blocks and Old
Bottles.
A Few Original Views on the
Question ofPaViug.


The citizens generally are just now
engaged in reading sermons in
stones" and a geological society, it j:
rumored, has been formed which mum
bers about $4,000 members-the en-.
tire population of the city. 1t is
really gratifying to know that science
has grappled with the masses and
that so many persons have an answer
cooked and primed, to the rOekiest
geological questions.
The views of a number of these
accomplished scientists who consider
that they have been sighted by the
Appeals pavement bumpers are given
below at their earnest solicitation;
Mr.. Prince Wales says: l am in
favor of dirt roads, but if they must
be paved let it be done with wood
cobble stones are too handy in riots.
Mr.. Davitt Parnell says: Give me
wood pavemeHts or give me death
My preference is for shillaleh wood il
it can be procured; if not, and stone
must be had, let us have cobble stones,
big and loose.
Mr.. Fritz Bismarck says: The 7sry
best pavement in the world could be
made of inverted beer bottles. Certain
couutrymen OF mine will undertake
to see that every bottle is empty, SO
that the danger of too much moisture
in case of breakage will be avoided.
Mr.. DonniEetti Huckster says,
Pavements of banana and orange peel
would be the very thing. 1t cannot
be sued for damages, you see.
Mr.. Lean Sing says Puttee me
down for mackadamee stleet. He
makee dirty shirt velly CLICK. No
likee cedar bloekee. Him too clean,
Me mustee live alice samee uller
fellee.
Mr.. Brown says: am in favor Of
anything that Smith is opposed to.
Mr.. Smith says: l am opposed to
anything that Brown iavors.
Mr. Jones says: | am candid enough
to acknowledge that | have made
pavements a study. l like the pave
ment that holds up my team best aud
does least damage to my horse and
wagon,
Mr.. WardpOlitiehean says: | am in
favor of the pavement that wears best
in the popular opinion.
Mr.. Robinson says: | have no team
and don't'care; suit yourself.
Mr. Wiseman says; What this town
wants is good Nicholas" pavements,
1t is all a mistake, however, to use
heart wood, sap is the best and the
cheapest. Every block should be
soaked in lard and kerosine and Dailed
down securely with spikes. The old
method Of tsrring and feathering
every block is absurd-a waste of tar
and feathers and time.
Mr.. Knowitall says: 1t is all wrong.
There is not a man in the city Of
Memphis who knows what q good
pavement is. | saw the boss kind
when | was out West last summer.
Cowboy invented it and laid it. Got
mad with q Cinnamon one day, they
said, because the heather couldn't
put a superfne polish on bis
buck kin shirt and swore he'd wipe
out the race and ride over their bones
every day. In less'n six months he
had bone turnpike from his ranch
to the nearest grogshop that just
knocks the socks off n anything round
here. He stuck the big bones en6>
ways in the sand and filed in the
cracks with the little ones. Skulls
were used to ornament the sides Of the
road They say a colony OF fire flies
roasted in them skulls one night and
got their fireworks in good working
order by the time the proprietor Of
the road started home. Tam 0'Shan
ter and John Gilpin warn't nowhere
to that cowboy. He amt been
be IN heard of since and the roads
deserted Cant get that kind Of
material handy, you say2 we'll, no,
that is difficulty.