The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1883-10-25
HUGGING AS A FINE Art.

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spent an evening with his girl, and
during the evening, while the fam
lily was present in the parlor, he
was demure and bland and child
like as could be wished. The
mother came into the room after
the family had retired to get a
handkerchief she had left, and the
young man was seated in chair in
the middle of the room, while the
girl was seated on a sofa, and moth
ing that the mother could see in
the actions Of either led her to
think they were more than passing
acquaintance. 1t seemed to her
as though the young people had
met before, but there was no eyi-
denee that they were very well ac-
quainted. At night, after he had
gone, the girl complained of pain
in her side, and in the morning a
doctor was called, and he found
that two of the girls ribs were
broken. How it was done nobody
knew. The girl could not tell for
the life of her, though she blushed
when asked about it, and the moth
er looked very wise as she looked
at the doctor. The doctor made
some inquiries, set the ribs and
went away, and the girl pro-
ceeded to recover.
That evening the young man
called and was astonished when in
formed of the extent Of the girls
injuries, and wondered how it could
have happened, though the mother
watched his face close as he spoke
and detected not only a blush but a
profuse perspiration on his face.
She had been a girl once herself,
and though she had never had any
ribs broken she had been hugged
some. 1t was trying position for
all Of them. The father was away
ON a trip to Wisconsin, and when
he came home the matter had to be
explained to him. He was told
that the ribs just simply broke
themselves, and neither the mother
nor the girl nor the young man
could account for it, and yet all
three of them blushed terribly. The
father patted his girl on the head,
told her she wonld be better when
she got overit, and then called the
young man into the library. The
young man was so weak he conld
hardly walk, and when he sat down
he took out a handkerchief and
mopped his brow and wished he
was dead. The father looked the
young man over and was sorry.
He finally said:
young man, / guess ! can give
you some points on hugging. You
must first learn that a girl is not
constructed on the same principle
Of an iron fence or a truss bridge.
A girl is delicate piece Of me-
chanism, like a fine watch, full of
little springs, wheels, jewels, &c.
The breaking of any one of these
would cause her to cease keeping
time and necessitate her being
taken to a jeweler for repairs. In
hugging a girl you don't want to
go at it as if you were raking and
binding or catching sturgeon. /
know that where the family sits up
late with young couple and spoils
several precious hours of hugging,
that unless the young man has a
good head when left alone with the
object of his affection, that he is
liable to overdo the matter and
try to make up for lost time. He
seems to want to hug up a lot ahead
and grabs the girl as though he
| wanted to break her in two. This
is wrong. You should go at it
calmly and deliberately, even
prayerfully, and be as gentle as
though she was an ivory fan. The
gentle pressure of the hand that a
girl loves, even the touch, is as
dear to her as though you run her
through a stone crusher. You should
not grab her as you would bag of
oats and leave marks on her that
will last a lifetime. A loving wo-
man should not be made to feel that
her life is in danger unless she
wears a corset made Of boiler iron.
l hope this Will be a lesson to you,
and hereafter, if you cannot con-
troll your feelings, l will provide a
wooden Indian for you to practice
on at first, until you have developed
your muscle and got tired, and then
we can turn our daughter loose in
room with you and not feel that it
is necessary to keep surgeon
handy. In allowing you to keep
company with my daughterI do not
agree to provide you with a human
gymnasium, dressed in a Mother
Hubbard wrapper and wearing
bangs. You can readily see that a
girl would not last a season through
if she had to have ribs set once a
week. Please think this thing
over, and if the girl is well enough
next Sunday you can drop in and
try some more ribs. Now, you go
home and hug hat rack for an
hour or two and have it repaired in
the morning"
The young man went out into the
night air, took his hat off to cool
his head and hired a man to kick
him.-A1acaatkee San.
Every telegraph operator who
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