San Marcos free press. [volume] (San Marcos, Tex.) 1877-1892, 1883-04-05
The New FIRST Reader.
LESSON ii. LIARS.

n. bat the best known is the
'sstIer liar. The older he. is the
vss s,sr his license TO indulge in his
create a pastime. Every day of the
n.vt furnishes him with an excuse,
va al he asks is for somebody to
MI 10. The weather liar remsm beers
.sa a tbe winter of 1879 was exactly
' ,ns that of 1491; the spring of 1882
pAs him in mind of the spring OF
p IsoI: the cold waves of the past win
~ d;dn't begin with those in 1774.
q. oan remember winters when not o
sSls Of snow fell, and summers when
, annr was frost every other night for
.hr.s months. He has seen the Their
msmster drop to forty-seven degrees
hsIow in January, and climb to $50
SsCrees in August. He remembers
oss wear when cherries were ripe in
Nav and another when they could
nOt be picked until November. No
msttsr what the weather is, the wealth
~ liar has always seen worse. If it
snovs for two days he has seen it
.now for four. If it rains for a week,
!. can remember when it poured
Dawn without o break for three. If
S SOu have seen it hot enough to fry
Zoos on stone sidewalk, he has seen
an DV axe melt on top of lump of ice.
THE FISH LIAR
Ranks second on the list. He goes
fishing about once in five years and
anends the rest of the time in lying
sbout what occurred. He caught bass
weighing fourteen pounds, but the
hoax broke and let him escape. He
had bite from pickeral four feet
long, but stubbed his toe and couldn't
null up at the proper moment. He
began fishing vi it'll minnows for bait,
but the fish bit so greedily that he
finally tied horn button to the hook
and pulled 'en out as fast as he could
drop the line. He caught an even
hbful, but while he was eating lunch
con the wharf gave way and let tub
and fish int the water. The fish liar
can be found sitting on the counter
at the grocery of an evening, all
wound up and ready to begin bust
ness, and nothing let's the sunshine
into his life so quick as to get hold OF
some one who will gasp out occasion
ally, "My stars! but is that possible?"
THE HoRsE-LIAR
Stands third on the list. He is man
who has had a horse which could go
in 2:2O. He hasn't got him now,
but that doesn t make any difference.
He has driven that horse in race
with an express train, and taken first
money. And he also had a running
horse which once made dash of
twenty-five miles on a bet of $4,000.
He hasn't the horse or the money at
the present time, but he can give you
the names of dozen leading bank
presidents and chief justices who saw
that dash.
The horse-liar doesn't stop at lying
about his own horses, but he is ready
toput in his best ticks on animals ne
never saw. He is in the confidence
of the owners of all the celebrated
equines. In his opinion such track
is short and s11ch a track is long. He
doesn't believe Rarus was ever much
of horse, and he feels that he could
drive Goldsmith Maid three seconds
faster than she ever recorded
He is the Identical man who first saw
speed in Fora Temple, and if he had
wanted to be mean about it, he could
have bought her for $50 and all ola
pillow, and made $4,000 out of the
trade. He knows all about spawn,
ringbones, poll-evil, pink-eye, ano
CHAMBERS, and he has sure cure fol
each one. His seat is on the head Of
the second cracker barrel from the
stove each evening through the winter
and when he can come across some
one who has invested $40 and a cross
cut saw in an old plug of horse te
use in cider raill, he is in his glory
He knows all about that horse; NJ
has been an awful good stopper
saw him run away once, and KILLED
two women; Rarey tried to tame HIM
but had to give it up; reckon ne coul(
60 out now and give most of the boys
the dust; and so on until the grocer
ubs his sleepy eyes, and regretfull!
says:
"Come, you liars, it's time to loci
up and go home!"
Southern Truck Farming.
nN1zz1 De-, Tho address