davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
Mark Twain Aggrieved,

Mark Twain was asked to contribute
70 the album of artists sketches and
autograph letters. to be ratified for, at
the Bartholdi Pedestal Fund Art
Loan exhibition, and this is his re-
snonse which accompanied his con-
tribution
You know nv weakness for Adam.
and.you know how | have struggled
TO get him a monument and ialied'
now. it seems to me, here Is my
chance. What do We care tor stat
ute of liberty when we've got tho
thing itself in It's widest suhilmlty
What YOU want of monument IS Il
keep you in mind of something you
haven't eot-something you've lost
Very we'll we haven't lost liberty
we've lost Adam.
Another thing: What has libert..
done for US t? Nothing in particula
that | know of. What have We don
for her !? Everything. We've glvel
her home, and a goo'
home. too. And if she knows any
thing. she knows its the first time SD
ever struck that novelty. She know
that when we took her in she ha
been a mere tramp for over 6,OO
, ears. Biblical measure. Yes. an
we not only ended her troubles an
made things soft for her permanent.
but we made her respectabie--an
|, that she hadn't ever been before. An
now. after we've poured out these A
| lantics of benefits upon this age
, outcast, 10! and behold you, we a
asked to come forward and set up
. monument TO her. Go to. Let her s
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
Oranges and Florida.


Even the balmy AIR and orange groves oil FLORIDA
fail TO keep its people full OF happiness and COM
fort. Art must help nature every wherein the
tropics a. among the pines OF the North. ana,
chief amo- the blessings which are adapted 10 al
z,n.s ~ " ties DIR. J. 6. Wallace, OF Fort Dsde,
Fla lis PARKER's Tonic. IL seems To have the
world for field. and most OF the eur ent diseases
Weld 70 its action have used II in the ease OF
DELEGATE and dyspeptie young lady, with tne most
gratifylug results. IL seemed 10 accomplish vain
ease What the usual prescriptions and treatment
for that miserable malady failed wholly 70 Drlhe
about am also glad TO state that the Tome mas
greatly relieved me personally OF uounstSome
atomic condition OF the stomach OF long standing.
1 m il the ideal puri her and inyisorant
/ Nes.rs. HIsCOx Co. call special attention 10
| IN, fact tina. after April Is. 1893, the name and
n vie OF this preparation will hereafter De simpiy
\ PxsxEa's TOXIC. The word Ginger rs droppeo,
for the reason that unprincipled dealers are con-
stantly 6eceiving shvir patrons oy SUBSTITUTING IN
ferior preparatlOns under the name Oh dlnger ana
4 "a ginger Is an unimportant navorlng lnerenen'
in cur tonic We sure that our rterds VIII aeres
Win us as 10 the propriety OF the change. Iner'
4 iii he no change, however, IN the preparation
| itself and all bottles remaining IN the nands o
dealers. wrapped under the name OF pAbhE hl
| GINGER TOXIC contain the genuine medicine
the signature of HtsCox Co. IS NJ IN
bottom Of the outside wrapper.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
PECULIAR POINTS.
peculiar and Pertinent Para
graphs Published for Pro-
gressivs People.
Selected and Seized from Several
Sources by q Sharp Scissored
Seeker.
Fan Fancies.
hon Ftsre;sco Argoaaut,

ran Francisco Argoaaut,
| noticed that Spanish girl of my
ACQUAINTANCE held her fan half open.
/ asked the philosophy of the thing.
WHY you wouldn't hold it any other
way, would you? she said, with mild
surprise.
What difference does it make
All the difference. If | keep it
closed, it means | hate yon.
Heaven forfend
And if open it wide, it means L
lsvs you. :.
In Spain the etiquette of the fan Is
a serious matter. It's language is use,
fsl closed | hate you; open, L like
vou; half-closed, | am Indifferent
putting the fan under the eye, l see
you putting it above the eye, L un
derstand YOU closing the fan from
you, 90 away; closing it toward you
ecme here shutting the tan, stay
where you are counting the sticks
the hour of appointment.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
A SIRENS Song.

Chicago Tribune. r
DO you love me truly, HaroldE
Lurline Neversink was even more
beautiful than usual as she stood I'D
the soft, mellow light that streamee
from the Chandelier overhead and
looked down fondly upon her Geo. W.
Simpson. Bending tenderly over the
girl, George kisses her in chaste'
New Haven, Conn. manner, but does
not trust himself to answer ID WORDS
the fateful question she has asked.
And then they passed into the music I,
room, which is separated from the hall
by a portiere of navy blue velvet:
The windows of the room are shaded
by curtains of the same rich color, ano
the walls between them are covered
with paintings. Statues of MOI irt
Beethoven, and Guido filled niches
while over the low mantel hung full
length portrait of Maud 5. No wore
Vas spoken until Lurline had seated
herself at the piano. Lurline begaI
to sing. Carried away by the insplra
ton of the moment, she sang on an'
ON, until at last she paused from shee
exhaustion. And then, seeing tina
George was net at her side, she t1rne
to the fauteuil at her left. There h
lay-dead in all the proud grandeu
of bis glorious manhood. The mello
, liyht from the chandelier stole into tt
chamber of death and wandered owe
. his stately form that lay powerless an
stricken, over his noble, handsome FAC
, telling, even in death, of the deathie
.. lows be bore her. He had forgotte
to plug up bis ea,s.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
Teddy's Revenge.

ASasy (N. " Evening Joar.aL
Two youths of tender years sat III
rove of the orchestra chairs at Lee
land" opera house last night, making
eyes at the charming young person
who sustains the role of Teddy in "A
Bunch of Keys" Miss Lena Merville
she is called. 1t lie not at all marvel
Gus that SO arch and piquant little
body should strike the fancy of sus-
eeptible adolescence. There is no
doubt about her good looks. She ap-
pears pleasant, unaffected and COL
genial. The way she won the hearts
Of her audience last night proves this.
Bat the jsint admiration of the strip
lings In the front rows was married.
The elder one was little more than
rosy-cheeked boy. Both aped the
extremity of fashion in hight of collar,
straightness Of bang and snugness o.
ft. They were about as near ar
approach to the dude as the climate
can produce. But their presence II
the theater would have been unnoticeo
had they not insisted on awaiting them
eolves Of the entreact to display theI
genre raiment. Both are students a
the Troy polytechnic institute. 1t
learned that for a week or more pas
thew have been in the wake OF tn
company vainly endeavOripg to fin
favor in the eyes of Miss Merville
Being a sensible young woman she ia
never minded the youthful impuls
which made them guilty of the In
profiety.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
It's q Telephone.

esicsgo In er Ocean.
A well-to-do but snsophisticated
far aer from one of the border conn
ties of Indiana was in the city lately,
attending the fst stock show, aud
brought along his wife and daughters
to see the sights and do some shopping.
Among other places they visited was
Mandel's new store, and after wan
Gering around the first floor for q
while the party came to a stop neal
the elevators.
One of the daughters was first t.
discover the cars moving silently uE
and down, receiving and discharglns
their cargoes of passengers. She
ierked her fathers coat sleeve to direc
his attention to the phenomenon, am
in a tone that was audible to tn
clerks in the neighborbood, asked:
What's that, pawf-tbat thin:
going ap and down. with sofys in it?
The old man gave the elevator
long, calm, deliberate, scrutlniz'n
stare, and exclaimed with joy:
"By gosh it's a telephone! tn
frst ever see y
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
Mise Hensler's Career.

Some thirty years ago an American
gentleman, now residing in Paris, but
then living in springfield, Mass. went
to the shop of his tailor. Mr.. Hensler.
70 olive an order. While in course of
conversation he was attracted by the
sound of sweet and fresh young voices
;o;ning in q duet i'm The next room.
Mr.. Hensler seeing that his customer
pleased with the song, invited him 20
enter and be presented to the young
singers. who were lis two daughters,
Elsie and Rosa. They were then mere
children, the elder tai, handsome
girl of Is, and though almost wholly
1ptsusht they sang with great sweet
ress several simple and popular songs
Their new acquaintance was % much
pleased with their voices that ne sen
them a quantity of gooo musics ano
induced some philanthroPic an'
wealthy ladies Of Bosom to interes
themselves in these gifted children
Rose, the younger, soon abandoned al
thoughts of a public career and 60
married. The elder student With sue
cess went upon the operate boards
and 6pslIy excepted an European er
8 gagement. She is now the Counties
I. d'Edla, the morgapatic wife of the e'
= king O: Portugal, Dom Gernado. Sh
|. accompanied him to Paris few day
a ago. Her early friend sent her car
e with request for an interview: ~hlc
:, was instantly accorded, and ne Wa
II most warmly received. The COUNTIES
n go far from endesvoring to efface t.
e personality of Elsie Hens:er, talked
n the old DAYS in Springfield, asked att
q her Boston friends, told OF her oPerat
l. success. and finally sent for her roy
II spouse that she might present TO M
Il the kindly fellow-countryman VINO h'
Is betriended her in her youth.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
Women Fencers.

A man with waxed mustac5e.
mild blue ewes, and a bald head stood
in a martial attitude in his fencing
academy, says the New York sun
aud wbiried a stick in his HAND. 1t,
rhe stick. was about three feet long,
half an inch in diameter, and had
basket hilt, which efieetually pro'eH ed
the hand of the man using 1t.
This is the Implement that ladies
handle in fencing, said the professor
balancing it deity on one finger.
Why don't they use the folly
They are afraid Of it. Besides they
don't like to wear masks. which rumple
the hair. -
Have YOU many women pupilsY
Nine come here, and L have two
families whom | visit twice a week.
NV outside pupils have gymnaslums
of their own, and two of them are
quite expert with the sticks. don.t
nim TO teach them fencing, simply the
. short stick exercises. They do not
thrust At each other with intent to
q strike, but merely for side arm move
ments used in psrrying. 1t sail very
nice and gentle.
h Then tney do not learn to fence a.
:. men do?
Oh no. They scream if you at
e tempt anything aggressive. mat the,
# want is the exercise ofths thing. J!
+ piver them good color, makes thel
c arms full. their wrists strong, and raj
Il div increases their strength. 1t
N particularly good for girls VIII
d lack an erect, snd-shall say Jaunty
Yes, If you choose.
Yes. iauntv carriage, said the Pre-
fessnr. stepping about ON his toes all
te towing careies>ly with his waxed mu
I'd tache. -,
at How do women dress when induii
n ing in snail stick practice
q. In the bloOming-I mean bl'omer-
r. costume commonly used for gymnasiu
exercise. knee breecEes, long stoc
n ings full waist, no belt, and long Skin
Ell Usually girls are satisfied TO GO throus
d. the simple movements of the exereis
NJ and stop there, but once in a while
AZ GIRL comes along who becomes amb
he ious for the real art of fencing. j.,
' &? little practical experience usually q
70 beartens her. There are, howeve
OH ha'f a dozen women in New York W
st. are reasonably expert.
ty, Women cannot compete with me
then?
rty Oh, no. They have not the bu
lar O; endurance. The exercise I'll
me them out. The sticks satisfy the
ZEN usually.
,od They have haunted the foyer of t
nv theater during the overturn in order
she scrape scquitance with the managme
,ws sundry cigars and ibations hs
lad finally placed them on easy terms W
MOO the male folk of the company. l.
md night the callow cavaliers, quite
and de spair at the inaccessibility of tn
.ly. lady love. proposed, in case Miss NJ
and Vile would accept. to dine the lac
nd of the company with one or two of
AT leading performers ofthe other pers
ged sion. The proposition was accept
are Overjoye1 at the prospect OF slit
n a at the table with the vision of Il
set immature dreams, they ordered spr
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18

casket. Subsequently he sent a note
to the legation, notifying them that
the young man had nied in bis room mi
very suddenly from heart disease. vi
course there was a shocking scene.
and il would be difficult to picture
the indignation of the foreigners when
thew discovered the deception which
had been played upon them.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18

a supper which. in the theatrical par
lance, was flood Cor the gods" The
c;.rtain having fallen, they repaired
to the appointed tryst. there to await
the appearance of her. whose fatal
beauty had stung them. But what
was their utter amazemeut TO have
eight or ten bearded men walk in up
on their feast with the announcement
that the ladies were very sorry, but
they had been taken suddenly very ILL.,
and would have to be excused. The
supper was eaten up by the men, and
two more discons late youths never
paid bill than those who took en-
early morning train for Troy.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
In the Manitoba Woods.

Wianipeg Times.
What's the nature of the work con-
nected with getting out logs'
Well. the first thing to be done IN
tina fall is the building of a shanty,
which i. generally constructed of logs,
rooted with lumber. This is fitted UP
inside with hunks f,r sleeping Pur-
poses. i'm which hemlock or spruce
brush is commonly used for bedding
The chiuks between the logs are packed
with moss and chips, and the shanty
j. heated bv means of what 10 called a
.caboose' or open fireplace, from which
the smoke makes its exit by an open
ing in the roof. The cooking is gener.
ally done by a man. who is often paid
the highest wages in the camp. Tue
fare consists of barrel or rattlesnske
p.rk, beans, potatoes, dried apples.
and such game as the men find IN the
, woods. =,
I should think such a home would
, |, be very comfortable, remarked the
scribe.
Yaas, so it would but you see the
trouble is, shantyman doesn't gel
IL much time to loaf arOuad the house
Z Every morning two hours before day
LIGHT the foreman's 'Hurrah, boys L
b.ari. and a few minutes after th'
whole shanty is alive. Some ar
: gressing boots. fixing helves and grind
y ing axes. while others are performing
y their ablutions and running their hna
:: ers through their hair as sort ofapo
IL ogv for combing. Breakfast over, tn
different gang set out TO the scene
their work. which in some cases
from four to fv. miles from this shant,
e: aud as work lie always commenced 0
od daylight, you can easily see we ha'
nS no chance to be late riser. Tue me
IN work all day, merely resting TO devon
IL, their dinner, which is generally cate
g. frozen or half-thawed by the side OF
log fire. About dusk start IS mac
Ell for the shanty, which is reached lor
after dark. Supper eaten, the weal
lee men bunk in and are soon safe IN q
'or arms of Morpheus So you see
have very little time for going
theatres and such like. Sunday Is c
'ey only day We have to ourselves, al
pie that is usually occupied in washi
and repairing clothing
Life i'm the woods amt what 1t
'To cracked up to be by long cha
ek: Perhaps you'd like to know somethl
inns about how we get out logs. Well.
are | was saving. after the shanty !
DnsI been huilt the foreman LAYS ont
the grounds and arranges the main ros
not for hauling the timber to the water
10 railroad. Cutting is then commene
we A cuttisg.-ang consists OF b M
'ery three ayemen and two sawyers. i
men fell a tree and butt it, while
as third sxeman measures of the log
tons il +; the rest is done with the ST
at Directly on the heels of the cutters
they low the skidders. Skidding cons
1t in drawing the scattered logs to AZ
heir ways. on which they are piled. 20
rap are then cut to the sideways and
t Is logs loaded on sleighs and drawn
who the water or railroad. Someti
MY when cutting close to these points
logs are 'sloope.i, OF one end loadee
pro- a small sleigh, and drawn in this +
and A.. 49, destination
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
FRANK AND CLEAR.
Having Admitted the Strength or
the Evidence, an Eminent Ply
sician takes Logical Ac-

the Evidence, an Em1nenL Fny-
sician takes Logical Ac-
ton.
The following letter tells its own story:
The signature will be recognized as that oil
the Chief of the DE Quincy
Home. and author of Drugs That Enslaye,
The Hypodermic Injection OF Morphine"
A Manual of Nursing" and many other
popular and valuable special medical works:
I9l West TENTH STREET,
New YORK, August III, 1850
MEssRs SEABuRY & JOHNSON,
GENrLEMEN:-Like most Of my probes
sion, | am cautious abOnt plnning my isl'n
10 any new medicine or curative agent BGt
your BENSON'S CAPClNE PORoUS
PLASTER has broken through the barriers
and won its way to my COED opinion'
Nv attention was first called to
i: SOME months ago oy pa
tient OF mine. Although was yell &C.
auainted with the superior excellence Oh
YOUR plaster and aniisePtic dressing MADE
especially for the profession, the Benson ;
was comparatively new to me. had heard
however, of Its merits as remedy, In c@sts
| nj Lame Back, Local Rheumatism, Neural.
gia, Congestion OF the Bronchial iuoes ano
Inngs, Dyspe psia. Torpid Liver and the like
affections, and have since begun 10 exper,
iment with it personally. l find BENSONs
CAPCINF PLASTER an exceptionally
clean plaster to use, and rapid in ITS action
MANY tests Of its qualities, made in my
own family and among my patients, have
convinced me that there is no other single
article SO valuable for popular use, nor sc
hop.ful in the diseases have named.
Should you desire TO do so. you may use
nv name TO that effect.
Very truly yours,
III III. KANE. A. NJ. Nj.
The genuine have the world CAPClNl
cut in the center Price % cents.
Seabury & johnson, Chemists, New York
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-12-18
Franks of a Practical Joker.

Franks of a Practical Joker.
The Boston Traveller.
Washington has one of the most IN
veterate practical jokers III this or any
other country, and some OF his pranks
throw the efforts of the late Z. A.
Sothern completely in the shade. I'm
fortunately be is not only fond OF the
"wine when it is red," but stronger
drink has obscured his talents and
well-nigh demoralized his reputation.
One of his pei hobbies is in the first
place to get "boiliDg drunk, and then
hire band and serenade his friends.
A few weeks ago be went on spree
and his friends liz the fashionable part
of the city were Mortified at being ser
enaded after midnight with this band
the object of my sketch uniformed
like the rest, and footing a cracked
and discordant clarionet.
His last escapade seems to be hi
masterpiece. Not long ago, accom-
panied by a member of one of tn
foreign legations, he started out an'
visited nearly every saloon in town
and before midnight his friend was il
a shocking condition. Thejoker too
the diplomist home with him and pu
him to bed. He then went out an
bought a coffin and laid the drunke
man in it. placing a number of Eghte
tapers at the head and foot OF tn
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-07-14

His wealth soon rose TO millions. Sud-
denly there came turn in the tide Of
his affairs and he went under. He began
life as footman in the house of u noble
man, and ended it in garret with scarce.
ly u CT to eat.
Theatrical agents nre hard at work at
present arranging their routes for the
coming season, and every hedRling star
is anxious to get himself or herself inter
viewed OF her dresses described. At
present the orezs among theatrical peo-
Pile is all for yachting This is a pretty
expensive luxury. but somehow even Il 9
m ost impecunious haye fling at it il
they can borrow the money. 1 know
one actor who took bis wife and party
of five out for three days cruise, and
had glorious time of il. They lived
on potatoes. bread and milk, for three
weeks afterwards.
"Noihing new under the SUM-" The
Casino with its garden on the roof, on
which there are several fountains and a
hand Of music, Of unimpeachable excel
lence is simply revlving an institution
which was known in the days Of Babylon.
I allude to the famous Hanging Gardens.
Still whether old or new. the Casino ia
n lovely place in summer, and an institu.
tion worth patroniz,ng.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-07-14
New Advertisements.
Put a Brand on Him

''Women are a necessary evil" he said,
bringing down his fist hard on the counter TO
emphasize the heartless remark. 1t was In
the village store at West Milton. Saratoga
County, and the speaker was the central
figure ofa group Of bucholic philosophers.
He was homely, slovenly and sixty.
"There's where l differ from you alto
gether," said MIR. George I. GVaham, of the
same place. women are mostly what men
make 'em. When husbands are bTutes wives
will fall into submission or make home hot
for the men and they're unnatural In either
character. Love them, and especially be
good TO them when they're sick, and you'll
have no trouble. There's my own wife, now
She's suffered a good deal with dyspepsia,
nervous prostratlon and other ailments that
took the bloom of her cheeks and tho spring
out Of her steps. Well, she saw an adver-
tisement OF PARKER's TONIC, and thought 1t
would be lust the thing in her case. Gentle
/ men. 1 sent hve miles after a bottle. She
/ took IL. sent again after more. So several
/ times. TROUBLED Why, fyou could see how
| much good II has done her you would say
| thai women are the greatest OF Gods bless
| inps, and PARRER's TOXIC Is the next"
| This preparation, which has been known as
] PARKER's GINGER Tosio. will hereafter be
| called simply PARKgR's ToNlo. This change
| has been rendered necessary by substitutes
| imposed upon their customers by unpTineipled
dealers under the name OF ginger aud as
ginger is really an unlmportant navoring IN
| gTedient, we drop the misleading word.
| There is no change, however, in the pre-
paration itself, and all bottles remaining 10
The hands Of dealers, wrapped under
the name OF PARKER's GlEsER TOXIC,
contain the genuine medicine II the fac simile
signature OF HIsCOX 4 20. is NJ the bottom
Ofthe outside wrapper. July I-SS I'm.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-07-14
Administrators Notice,

Estate OF JONAS FooHT, Deceased.
Letters Of Administration on the Estate OF
Jonas Foeht, late of the Borough Of Parry
willie. Carbon county, Penna., deceased, have
been granted to the undersigned, to whom all
persOns indebted TO the said estate are re-
auested 10 make immediate payment, and
those having claims or demands will make
known the same wit hout delay,
THOS S. BECK and
CATHARINE FUNHT,
June 2, I6S3-w6 Administrators
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-07-14
Dividend Notice.

TTYANTED-LADIE TO TAKE OUR
w New Fancy " ork ut their homes, in
city or country, and earn SO to S12 per week,
making gocds for our Summer and FAN
trade. Send l5c for sample and particulars.
Hudson Mfg. Co 4, @Gb Sixth Ave. New york
nIVoRCES.-No publicity; residents Of any
~ State. DesertiOn, NOn.suppori. Advice
and applications for STAMP. w. II. LEE,
ATTY, x39 Broadway, N. Y. iune23 w
no ADVERT Users Lowest Rates for ad-
j vertising in 057 GOOD newspapers sent free.
Address q Eu. p. ROW ELL 81 co, 10 Spruce
ST., New York. lunt2j-w4