davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04
Aaalts The Justice OF What We kxa

The Worth county Eagle admits
the justice Of what the Nationals 20,
maud when asking legislative con-
troll OF railroads, and also their d..
nand tor government control 0: in.
ter-ssste commerce, by claiming that
Il urged the same measures two
years ago. Very we'll. that ends
controversy between Us as Il the
necessity and justice Of these meas
ures. Sine. 1854, the legislature Of
Iowa. With tho single exception of
1874, hxs been more than two third.
republican with every etate .f,lcer
~ that party. TIE lepis.stnse o.
1874 enacted what IL kaa1n IA lh..
Granger Law. Icing hr sct g. Put the
railroads and their f.eishtaad trans
portation charges under tie control
Vf the laws Of the atate. III 1876 re-
publican Rsceadescy In the ,eisla.
ture vue restored. ard With II came
an attempt To repeal tie Granger
law outright. But this scheme b..
ing deemed imroi:tic Was deferred
until the legislature OF lsTs. neail,
u republican. repealed III. laY plar
ing the railroads under &c control
..f the state authority. aud relieving
tLen aLerafrom. And The intsr.stat.
~SsB ns..t,~ liii ho@er e-.nsae-
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

largely republican co,lllnot even get
before tina, bo' yfor u hearing Tho
| committee before W. ch the matter
came for Il report WAS composed u
n majority Of republicans who Were
unanimous against recommending
the passage Of the bill. One demo
crat MIR. Reagan and two Nationals
sought to get the bill before congress
In n minority report but as II re-
anired q two.thirtls vote to accom-
pl.sh this, the measure not having
tSe sanction OF the republican party
was thus defeated The difference
between the EnJls and the PAN
Dealer seems 10 be nhout this: the
PLAIN IEsIER considers the action
ri II republican legislature and Of II
republican congress better test
and Interpretation OF the aims and
purposes OF the party. than are the
varorinEs Of An unknown editor mp
In korihw0od IF whose existence
anil wisdom our state and national
legislatures seem to b. utterly igno-
rnnt. The planks Of platform are
measured by the plank, OF lepi-la-
ton, where Il party has the power 10
enact its principles.into law. judy
ed by this criterion the republican
party Is the friend. promulgator and
supporter ufthe corpor,ted monopo-
lies that have overrun the govern
m.nt and tramplcd It's people under
their feet
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

Senator Eannnds' bill to regulate
political assessments should be en-.
titled How not do it, The bill In ].
uoduced by Senator Beck .. Ken.
lucky, rs u Substitute for the Ed
Munds' bill might be entitled, How
TO do It." The EdmundA' bill Is not
IS stringent us ,hs law OF 1875, und< +
which Gen. Curtis w8s lined.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

TO levy . tariff upon imports Is 10
tar tho production OF such commod.
titles tho amount Of such levy. Ev-
cry tax. no matter how, or upon
what levied, Is = tax on industry, be-
cause oil taxes must ultimately be
paid by labor. The ingenuity OF
man has never devised any system
OF taxation that dill not ultimately
east its burden upon labor.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

Tho Chicago Herald says ! Hy
Att Smith II to resume preaching
otter the 18th OF March. X lie |. ns
poor q preacher as he has been con.
gresham. we'd rather sprnd orr
time fishing for polly wcgs than 10
listen to his twadt.ie.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04
". I. NED. Editor.

The Chicay, Journ1, heads m ar.
ticlo which II generally copied by
the republican papers. Exit Green
back Party Don't von wish II
would. gentlemen az the manopoli..
tie prcsa?
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

Another infant in tistry hns sprunE
up In New England to demand \ pro.
tcotive tariff. r Is thu IN lnn'actura
Of Idols for heathen worship. Tho
State Register oasht to champion
IT'S cause without delay.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

We cannot avoid saying that thc
Hastings Plain De7ler II orr ~ the
very ablcst Rational papers III iowa.
and should have al immense circn-
latlon on the Missouri slope.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

SAirrl. SisvrT.
Miss caiitle Iowa
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1883-01-04

- A. -A.sER : ~. -s~ +,2i esa e'.s,G...l. =,
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Idaho Meanness.

Don YOU 90 there b, said, a. he
turned around on the passenger who
announced that he was going through
to Idaho. They are the most selfish
people sou ever saw How Well,
take my case. | ran wildcat under
u school house and discovered a rich
mine, and yet they wouldn't let me do
any blasting under there during school
hours for fear Of disturbing the children.
| had 10 work at nights altogether, and
they even charged me thirty cents for
breaking the Window .'Iudeedr'-
And in another case. whore staked
out = claim and three men Jumped it.
the Governor refused 10 issue ammuni-
ton or let the Sheriff move; and do you
know what had to do? / had to dig a
canal from the river, three miles away,
and let the water in 10 drive the Jump
ers out; and even the Coroner who sat
on the bodies made me pay for the cof-
fins. and charged me Sl2 for y funeral
sermon only sever .miuntes long Don't
go beyond Colorado if YOU want TO be-
used well"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Anohoyies Va Gamers.

An Irishman. on being told that he
had insulted man. who might knock
him down unless he apologized, replied,
Faith! I'll knock him down first to
show him I'm not afeard, and thin apol-
ogize." Pat was good representative
of that laundering Celtic impulsiveness
which so often tumbles his countryman
into shot water" when they should
plunge into cooling bath. He was
cousin-German to an Irish officer,
whose comical blunder came near hav.
ing tragical ending.
One day, at the mess Of = British reg
iment. the conversation turned upon
anchovies, small picked fish. relished
by epicures. One of the officers, sn
lrishman, remarked that he had seen
them growing in the garden Of the Gov
ernor of Malta. His statement was
questioned by brother-oificer. who
went SO far as to characterize it rs alb
surd.
"An' didn't see them with my own
eyes--a beautiful hedge of EN-, with the
ladies picking 'em" retOrted the Irish
man, indignant at his statement being
doubted.
mo, you didn't" answered the
dou bier, also indignant that such stuff
should be uttered in hisprcsence. "You
never saw anything Of the kind. You
must take us for fools to make such a
statement
AS is usual in such cases, one word
brought on another until the little mis-
understanding grew into serious quar-
rel, and a challenge was given and ac-
cepted. The next morning the TIVE
met to exchange pistol shots.
At the first fire the doubling officer
fell. "Do you think he's dead?" anx-
lously asked the Irishman of his second.
by the caperS he's cutting. | should
say not" answered his second.
"An' it was cdpers yc said? | must
make an apology; twas coperS meant
and not anchovies ut all"'
And with Irish impulsiveness and
real regret he made an apology that
was as satisfactory to the wounded man
as could be expected with the pain of a
severe wound in his side. But "capers"
and "anchoviesn made the point to
many = joke in the regiment, for months
afterwards
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Strange History of a Will.

One has heard of wills written on
bed-posts, concealed in hay-lofts and
flower-pots, and other possible and i'm
possible places, but probably no will
has ever passed through stranger vicis-
STUDIES than one admitted to probate by
Sir James Hannen. The testator was
an engineer on board n channel steam
er and made his will giving everything
TO his wife, and gave her the will also.
Some time afterwards they had . quar-
rel, during which she tore the will up
and threw the pieces into the fire. The
husband picked up the pieces and put
them in an envelope labelled Poison"
but said he would make y new one.
However, several years afterwards he
died of smallpox on the steamer, andon
his clothes being searched, before burn
ing, the envelope with the pieces OF the
will inside it WAS luckily found and
given to his wife. The brand plucked
from the burning has now been pieced
together and will be deposited at Som
erset house, lesson to all time to
wives not TO lose their temper too far
if they do not wish also to lose their
husbands property or to save it only
by 3 lawsuit -PaN .NaH gazette.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Foggs Tickle Helprneet,

Fogg says his wife is the most tickle
minded person he ever saw. The other
day she spoke of Miss Blankas charm
ing young lady and remarkably hand
some woman. And" said Fogg, II
told her that was Just what thought;
that Miss Blank was most delightful
young lady one whose beautiful face one
never tired Of gazing upon, and con-
siderable more to the same effect. Well
would you believe it, Mrs. +. suddenly
tackled about and said oh, she isn't
so very pretty She's got an awful
homely nose, her mouths mile too
big. and she hasn't got a bit of express
sion in her eyes. Then shes got such
a disagreeable way about her
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

ing earlier than the sther. whose place
is It to leave firstp" asks correspond
ent. The inquirer should have figured
this out while going home, instead Of
trying to console himself with the re.
Election that the other fellow would
probably miss the last car.
Once upon q time an editor in search
of food was compelled to pawn his dia-
mond Shirt-studs for 8 loaf Of bread.
While conveying the humble meal to
his castle hungry dog ran off with it,
and a few moments later robbers de-
prived the editor of his watch. Instead
of being ratified by these untoward in
cidents, the editor smilingly remarked:
IL thank the gods that I still have my
appetite left" We are taught by this
little fable that true contentment is the
greatest of all journalistic boons.
A clerk of an eminently respectable
house, the head of which is q deacon,
was instructed to prepare an advertise
ment and have it inserted in the papers.
He prepared one which read: 1.-The
pot scooped! We hold four aces to the
bob-tail flush of another house in town
on fine table-cloths. When the deacon
saw that advertisement it positively
made him dizzy, and the fact that he
was called upon by the church to ex-
plain it didn't make the clerks act of
resignation any more pleasant for him
TO 60 through.
At q dinner party the little son of the
hostess was allowed to come down to
dessert. Having had what his mother
considered sutliciency of fruit, he was
told he must not have any more, when
to the surprise OF every one of the
guests, he exclaimed "If you don't
give me some more, I'll tell.' A fresh
supply was at once given him, and AS
soon ~ it was finished he repeated his
threat; thereupon he was suddenly and
swiftly removed from the room, but he
had iust time 10 convulse the company
by exclaiming. MY new trousers are
made out OF ma old bedroom curtainsW
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Lyman Beecher's Absent Mindedness.

DIR. Beecher was frequently absent
minded. On one occasion, after an
evenings service, he started for home
in brown study. The houses in his
block were Of the same pattern. He
entered the wrong door. The house
which he mistook for his own was oc-
cupied by q well-known halter, by the
name of Rhoades, a Unitarian. The
Doctor put his hat on the stand in the
hall, and went into the back parlor.
where Mrs. Rhoadcs and her family
were gathered, drew a chair up 10 the
IRE, put his feet to warm on the mantle
over the CRATE, tipped back his chair
and his head simply thinking. Just
then he happened to notice French
clock under glass upon the mantle. and
exclaimed: wife. where in the world
did you get that clock?' No answer.
No one could answer, for they were
ready to burst with merriment at their
ueighbor's absence of mind II say.
wife. where did you get that clock"
Mrs. r. was lady. Putting her hand
gently on his shoulder, she said: "Dr.
Eecchcr, you have made mistake and
got into the wrong house" He cast 4
quick glance around upon the family
circle, sprang from his chair, and with
a bound was out Of the house, without
word II explanation OF excuse.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Ganbetta's Miscalculation

Since Grevy handed .Monsignor CzseHi
the bcretta. good story ha, come out
at Gambetta's expense, At the famous
diplomatic dinner given at the DUAL
d'Orsay by the last-named statesman,
when the guests were passing from the
dining-hall into the saloon, the papa.
nuncio who walked first rs sem, e mem
Der Of the diplomatic body, suddenly
turned back. The host advanced to in
quire the reason. Il have forgotten my
hat" explained Monsignor Caacki. is
that alp" replied Gambetta. taking care
that all the guests heard him; II hope
soon to have the honor of myself hand
ing YOU another
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Aristotle recounts the story of a c,

Aristotle recounts the story Of a GER
tain man Of Lesbos. who bought up all
the oil presses in the country because
through the repeated failure of the olive
crop for several years they had become
useless rubbish. Then, when there
came - good year for olives, this man,
owning all the presses, sold them at
prices satisfactory to himself and made
a fortune. This seems to us II distinct
and typical corner and it does not in
volvc the idea of a fictitious transac-
ton.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
Study of Languages,

A gentleman who has recently taken
up the study of French, and who loses
no opportunity of airing the little knowl-
edge he has thus far acquired Of the Ian
guage by translating and pronouncing
such French words and phrases as his
friends might encounter in his presence,
was thus addressed by an acquaintance:
"If you only knew Is much English a.
you do French, YOU might get along all
right"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

The San Antonio Times says that
while some handsome fortunes have been
made III the past few years in Texas
by wool growers, the fortunes made in
the wool business are small compared
with the vast fortunes which some men
have made in cattle. John Stone, of
Cook county, Texas, invested $4,000
in cattle in 1879, and after carrying on
the business less than four years, sold
his interest few months since for
$685. 600 cash. This largo fortune was
not made in the increase Of his pur-
chase, he ha, ing bought and sold cattle
during the tim". The present high
price Of beef rnijt" mlhe- the cattle
business one Oh 'lw uy-J lucrative in
the State
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
ERRORS OF YOUTH

AIENILEMAN Who suffered for ycarsfrom NEEV.
erects OF youthful iUdscreuR. wiz f.r the sake OF
sunerins humanity, ~rni I IA al who need Il the ~
clpe and dirCtipU for making the slmple remedy nv
which he was cared sufferers wishing 70 prout Nv tire
sdvrrti-rr erf-r-stc cin DO ~ ~ a,.iNslns 1, pr
fecf CONFIDENCE.
sp-ee y J1V> nGpgN. eC~i-- It. Nr~Norx
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
TO CONSERVATIVES.

The advertiser having been permanently cured OF
That dread disease, Consumption, by simple remedy
~ anxious 10 make known to hs fellOw.suierers the
means of cure. To all who desire he will send COPY
II the prescription used free of Charge) with the di.
recons for preparing and using the same which they
will find sure Cure for Cou CHS, Colds, Com
sum ,tion. a sthma, Bronchitis, &c.
Parties wishing the prescription will please address,
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

A school teacher is person employed
10 give parents i've honrs of peace and
quiet per day.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27
GRAYS SPECIFIC MEDICINE.

I9ITI- III tIuTr Vu NJ. ami many Othsr nlseasfs
that lr" '' insanity ur Consumption and Prerns.are
GRAVE
- tui. p'rt4cula-. % our pamphlet, which We d,
sire 70 s. FIRE rs mail 10 every one .FTne Sr,clrr
Medicine Is sold By all druggists az - per package o.
~ a,Nsc> Tor Is or viii Dc sent Zee by msi on ~
r'lpt VI The money, by addressing
THE GRAY MEDICINE CO.. Buffalo, NY.
o. acSoant Of counferfeits have adopted the Yrl
oN wrapper, the only genuine Guarantees Of cur
>Su'd " u beArl!iE. Agent. tttAHs. III. an
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

nR. H. w. WEBS, (Deutcher Doctor.) late
~ Physician and Surgeon TO the st, Louis Female
Hospital. Office Stefels Clothing Store corner OF
Main and La Sale streets. Residence south bluff
Vt Mrs. Renzs. apps
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

nR. j. =. RYBUEIN, Ottawa, III. Office
~ IN the Opera House Flock. In office day and
night iani27S
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

+ w. BREWER, Attorney and Counselor at
~. Law. and Notary Public. Rooms No. H. u and
10, Opera House Block, OTTAWA, III. jan4,7S
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

n. N. ARMSTRONG. o. h. CHAPMAN
ARMSrRONG * CHAPMAN N, Attor.
"A neys and COunselors NJ Law, Ottawa, Ill. NJ n.
Armstrong. Notary Public. Ofhce In Gedneys Block,
Ottawa jun5.'sC
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

w BUSHN ELL, Attorney nc Law. Ottawa,
W Ill. will practice IN any Of thr courts IN this
state Close attention paid to collections. Conveyan
ces carefully made and abstracts prepared with
&C. Notary public Office west of Court House. JAM ~
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

DAVID "A. Coon, Attorney at Law. Onice
~ Rooms and ArnO.y (Wood's) Block, Ottawa
Illinois. dec2s
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

nR. VIM. SHEPPARD, Member of the
~ Royal College of Veterinary Surgeons England:
Fellow OF The London Veterinary Medical Association
Also Veterinary Editor Duntorls Spirit Of the Turf.
be consulted At his office Jefferson Street, half
block West Of Post Office. augS
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

SAMUE;II RICHOLS0N, Attorney and
- Counselor at Law. Will sctice In the courts Of
La Sale aud adjoining counties. Office west vi Court
House, Ottawa, H. hoyH
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

RDwIN g. LELAND HIRAM r. 9ILBKRT,
I BLAND Sc GILBER'r, Attorneys At
IL Law. Office IA Opera House Block Ottawa III.
iunla,79
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1883-01-27

"Is 1t a kyar yer liking fur, SORT"
said a man with whip in his hand.
shortly after l landed in Dublin. He
touched his cap most respectfully and
was almost obsequiously civil.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1883-07-17
gELEGRAPHIC
The Presidents Proposed -FOUR.

Chicago, Washington specials
say that although there are very contra
dictory reports as to the presidents pur.
poses, there is no possible doubt that he
will make 8 trip 10 the Yellowstone. He
is reported as having said to friend that
he had abandoned his Newport trip and
his sea bsss fishing for this year, and in
tended 10 have a good time in the yell
lowstone, 'taave," said the president,
had enough Of what is called socieiy in
winter in Washington. l want to get
hundred miles away from the neai est
politician, where l can take rest in my
own way and be relieved from the social
and political pressure that is so hard TO
avoid; then l have never seen that Sec
ton of the country we are going
to, nor do | know anything about the
people who sre the pioneers OF civilization
and keep on its uttermost wave. l will
have an opportunity to practically study
the Indian question, which l have
wished to do ever since I have been in
Gfice. General Sheridan has selected the
best guides and scouts he can find to 90
with US on'the trip, and We will see parts
of country which as hitherto have been
almost unknown TO the white man. As
to the spice OF danger there may be, that
only adds to the interest Of the journey.
| shall trough it" just as the rest de,
live and sleep in tbs opan air, wear out
my old hunting suit, and for the first time
in my life become a savage. Such trip
will be worth more 10 ma il instruction
and health than twenty seasons in New
| port or Saratoga would be-"
Attorney General Brewster expects to
spend the rest OF July and August at
Newport; Secretary Lincoln will spend
August in the Yellowstone country with
the President; Secretary Folger intends
to be at his homo in New York; Post
mesteT-Gene oil Gresham will he absent
from Washington in August; Secretary
Teller has planned to spend August in
| Colorado; Mr.. ChaDdler's intentions are
not known; he may not then be a cabinet
officer, bu. thereis every prospect that the
entire administration will be absent from
Washington during August and the gov
eminent will be run by assistant Pecre-
taries.
The anxiety of the President OF being
absent for 30 long q time from tele-
graphic communication hss been relieved
by an arrangement which will furnish
daily line couriers from whoever of the
presidential parry gees to the nearest
telegraph station, so that the president
will be in daily communication with the
executive Office as well as he could bs on
fishing excursion.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1883-07-17
The Tamative AFFAIR

London, 16.-A dispatch from Sims
says the military authorities there have
been instructed 10 make inquiries in re-
gard to the shipping available for trans
port service. Captain Hay, Of the Tay.
mouth Castle, on arrival At Natal, re-
ported nothing relative to the alleged
insult to the late Britieh consul at Tama-
tive. The captain of the British man OF
wal, Drydd, was acting as consul; Cap
tain Hay was allowed to see the captain
of the DryGd at once The French
wished to have all consular dispatches
seEt aboard Admiral Pierre's ship, but
the EhR lish objected and Captain Hay
received them directly from the DryGd.
Tie later vessel s.eorted the TGynsotttb
Castle out Of the hsrbor.
A dispatch says the Protestant Church
was destroyed during the bombGrdment
of Tamstive, Madagascar. There il
much misery smOpg the British subjects
ct Tsmstive. The governor Of MSuritul
has sent q steamer to bring away refu-
gees. The French admiral lowered the
consular hags, and forbade their rehoist-
ing until foreign representatives had
been resceredited. The captain Of the
English war vessel DryGd has offended
the Flench By landing q guard Of
marines at the British consulate, and
placing his boats at the disposal Of fugi-
tives. Dispatches from Tsmstive dated
June 81, confrm the report OF the srrest
Of English missionaries by the French.
Three other English residents are placed
under temporary arrest. Communion
ton with the British man.of-wsr is for
hidden. The French refugees from the
capital, who it was feared were murdered,
reached Tamative in safety, having been
we'll treated in the interior.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1883-07-17
w H1TE HOUSE HOTEL

sHILOH's CURE WILL imm ,lsc
diatelv relieve Group, MhoGSp ~
,ough and Bronchitis. Sol" ~ -
{. N. /. Drug Store A1