Arizona silver belt., 1883-06-09
REUREN's RIDE.

A young man wearing a big blue
tie that Topped about his scrawny
neck like flag at half-mast on the
dome of the City Hall, was accompan.
led to Central Park yesterday by his
bride. She chung to his arm with the
tenacity of porous plaster in the
small of the back. They had come to
the city on their wedding tour. Both
wore that -go-lucky look that is
part and parcel of young married
couples before they begin to growl
over the miseries entailed by trying
to draw world of happiness from a
50 week salary.
After gazing in wonder at the bears
and lions in the menagerie, they passed
out on Fifth avenue, where several
young men in little caps and knicker.
bockers were whirling by on bicycles.
"Sakes alive! Reuben, look at them
buggies without any bed or bottom,
jist on two wheels, one afore the other.
| tell you man that kin ride SIGH an
ingyne as that is no fat said the
bride, following with her eyes the gay
riders until they dwindled into mere
specks in the distance.
II 'spose you're sorry you flung your
charms away on me, Ell? You oughter
set your cap for one of them fellers.
You think that's sompin' great riding
one Of them consarns. I never laid
eyes ON the man that kin do anything
in the ridin' line that I can't foller,''
replied the young husband dropping
the arm of the bride in plain fit Of
jealousy.
Reuben, here are some more a com.
in; jest look"
"Hold on Mister, switch off a bit an
let me take look at that Internal in
gyne. Will you let Teller try his
luck on it! Marg, my wife, here wants
to see it, an want to show her right
heIe that she didn't hook on to a fool
when she took me. never laid eyes
on mule, boss or jackass that could
floor me-"
"I'm goin, to ride this machine or,
Marg Blamer, you'll be a young wild
der"
The wheelman gave the bicycle
scientific lurch that brought it circling
around the groom, and descending,
he rendered the machine to the novice.
"Marg, the blasted thing amt got a
saddle big enough for a baby. No
matter. l reckon l kin do what I sees
DONE" In trying to mount the bicy-
Gle as he would plough-horse the
groom Of a day found himself spread
ing the eagle on the cobble stones.
"You kick, you? You onery cuss,
III git you this time, an in the flank"
he said, as he made desperate spring,
striking the handle, which hooked him
in the rear pocket of his black store
coat, letting out quart of peanuts,
recent present to his young wife.
The owner of the bicycle told him
to mount, steady himself and he would
run alongside to give the cycle start.
Reuben did and by using his legs Wig
orously the machine gamboled around
the frightened bride like her big dog
Towser. Reuben made a last desper-
ate effort to steady himself and shot
out into the middle of the avenue,
striking goat-cart with the force OF
a battering-ram. The goat-cart held a
barrel of swill, which turned on its
beam end to receive the bicyclist as he
shot into it with the precision of cir
cus-rider going through hoop.
The bride and several wheelmen
gathered around the PROSTATE form of
the venturesome groom. He called
his wife: 'Marg, if l go, keep my
grave green. | must have run into
boardin' house and butted my brains
out hittin' agin the walls of the soup
kitchen"