Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-08-19
PEOPLE YOU KOW,
And Sometimes Wish SOu Didn't Male
and Female Cranks OF Mild Order.

and Female Cranks OF - Mild Order.
The man who apologizes-what a
bore? Thinks an apology settles all ac-
counts with his fellows. Carelessly
steps on q friends tender toes. Apollo
gizes and steps on them again. Walks
along crowded street swinging his cane
against people and apOlOgizingt right
and left. Turns TO apologize to q man
behind and run into Il woman in front.
More apologizing. Thinks he Is very
polite. Never stops to consider that if
lie were, the necessity for apology
would he removed. Would that he
might bow himself oil the government
pier or choke on his tircSOme BEG par
don, sir
The woman who apologies. Fishing
for compliments. Dressed in her new
est and best gown she apologies for
her poor biscuits. . for somebody
strong enough to reply, "Well | have
eaten better" just to see her fly in a
rage and deny it. She viii live u long
time. Heaven does not wish for her.
The man who cannot wait. Makes
everybody v In the barber
shop walks up and down in a fidgety
manner if he has to wait for a moment
for a barber. After he is shaved stands
at door half an hour wondering where
he will go to kill time. AT the bridge
loses his patience and looks cross at
everybody. Finally gets across and waits
ten minutes to tell a friend how he dis
likes to wait two.
AZ The Railway Crossing, Says IL IL J lust
His Internal Luck
to have to wait for a long train to pass.
Sometimes runs to get across ahead OF
the train, and, being across, stops to see
the train go 10y. SOme time he may
not run quite fast enough to get clear
across. Great IS hope.
The man who looks back to swear at
n truckman who nearly runs into his
buggy. Truckman drives right along
about his business. Man keeps swear
idg and looking back at him. Will
not u fire engine please come down the
street in front and knock him over q
block or two?
Woman who primps. Disgustingly
neat. Everything in its place-eXcept
the woman. She has q dusty rag in
her hand, and is in everybody's way.
Makes you get up and let her dust the
chair you have sat on for an hour.
Looks completely discouraged at your
dusty boots. Never opens doors or
shutters, lest sunshine get in and fade
the carpet. Keeps windows hermetical-
ly sealed to shut out dust. Life, though
short, is, also, too long in certain cases.
Man who wraps so bill outside a roll
of ones, - -
Harmless, though.
ManwhD falls m al m Galf on tha atrnat
Not always crazy, not always. Chicago
is plentifully supplied with him. Some.
times he talks because his mind is so
engrossed in business he forgets where
he is. Sometimes he talks to make
people believe he has a mind and thai it
Is engrossed. He would like to be
deemed q much absorbed man. IL the
lake would only absorb him.
The woman Who washes on Monday.
Cannot think of doing her washing
IN any other day. PostpOnes her
husbands funera! until Tuesday because
Monday Is washday. Must have break.
fast at 6 to get dishes out of the way
early and give the day to the regular
order. Maybe this woman will fall in a
washtub some Monday morning before
anybody is up to help her out. While
there's life there's soap.
The nan who cannot tell a lie. How
stupid! Can't tell 3 lie to entertain q
friend. Sticks to the truth no matter
bow stale and uninteresting 1t may be.
Doesn't know that the right to be de-
ceived is the most precious Of all human
rights Thinks it sinful to violate truth
and make people happy. Must tells
sick man he Is dying even if it kills
him. Mays he never hear anything but
truth. The curse Is complete.
The man who uses 8 book-mark.
Thinks he has read up to it. Does not
know that il he had read and lot
merely skinned he would need no
mark to find where he left off. Does
not know what reading means.