The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1883-10-12
PITH AND POINT.

"A crocodile shuts its jaws with a
force of 1, $40 pounds. If you don't be
lleve 1t, get in and weigh it when il
comes down. Burlington Ha,ekege
"A new style of stocking is called
Voltaire. Sockrates would have been
a better name. We never did admire
stocking with a tare at the end of it
Chicago Inter Ocean.
An exchange correspondent asks;
rs there anything that can be burned
to keep away mosquitoes" Oh, yes.
Burn the mosquitoes. That will keep
them away NorristoWn Herald
The Concord School of Philosophy
has not yet determined how a woman
should act when her hands are in the
dough-pan and an aggressive fly lights
on her nose Philadelphia Bnltetia.
Yes, there is music in a bagpipe,
there is no doubt about that. But the
music gets such a terrible squeezing in
coming through the narrow tubes, its
agonized screams are the only sounds
which reach the ear.
We have long heard it said that Eve
was made for Adams express company,
but it has only recently been discovered
that every girl in Colorado considers
herself candidate for the Western
Union. Boston Advertiser.
tim glad Billy had the sense to
marry settled old maid" said Grand
ma Winkum at the wedding. Gals is
hity-tity, and widders is kinder over
ruin and upsettin'. Old maids is
kinder thankful and willin' to please"
Christian at WoTk.
Two women were recently seen
pricing bingham in shop. One re-
marked to the other ON the label to, the
goods: ''See the American eagle and
the motto e pluribus unum;' that S the
French for In time of peace prepare for
war. ~ Boston Ad0crtiser.
This is the way mean editor tries
to crush man who thinks he possesses
the ''divine affiatus:n IAN esteemed
citizen, who is sending about fifteen
pages of original poetry every day, is
respectfully informed that if he doesn't
| let up, one of his pieces, with his full
name attached, will be published. This
warning is given in the interest of his
family and friends. IN T. CONNER
cial advertiser.
What do they have that fish up
there forp" asked the visitor at the State
House, looking at the ancient cod which
hangs from the ceiling of the House
chamber. e'It's an old superstition, ("
| replied the Boston man, ''that the fish
has a sort of repressive influence over
the Legislators. y And yet, suggested
the visitor, s'if | am not mistaken, all
of your laws are cod-defied y The Bos-
ton man fell into swoon, and when he
came to, he promised never to try to
| gull countryman again. Boston Tran
script.
A Natural Conclusion
BY Jovei this room is in a pretty stated
There's nothIlg III inc place it ought to be
When came in last night twas pretty late
And then the place appeared all right to me-
Where are my clothes? | had shirt! An
there
TITS, hung upon the peg which devote
70 that dark object which see is where
The shirt should be-a rubber overcoat
had another stocking, am surel
Ahai Ny watch on floor, with broken face;
che stocking meath my pillow, where, secure
1t ia my rule, at night, my watch to place.
A shoe upon the hat-rack hung. That's good
My hat is by the other, on the floor,
| And in it has my wet umbrella stood
II And dripped, instead OF in the euspadore.
It's quite enough TO make an angel weep;
Especially the spelling OF the hatl
Show me the wretch who, xhtteI was asleep
Entered my room and mixed things up like
that. = Boston Post.