Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1883-02-03

Nilcu We uuuItSSeu nlIu we lOuIu Hlut
napkins In the bosom of his vest that he
had picked up at the places where he
had called. He is all right this MORN
Ing, but he says II IS the last time he
Will drink coffee when he makes New
Hears calls" rctfI ewT
well, then you didn't have much fun
yourself on New Years. That's too bad"
said the grocery man, as he looked at
the sad eyed youth. But you look hard.
If YOU were old enough should say you
had been drunk, your eyes are so red
didn't have any fun, Ell? Well,
wish had as many dollars as had fun.
You see, after pa got to sleep ma wanted
me and my chum to go the houses pa
had called at and return the napkins pa
had kleptomanianced, and SO we dressed
up and went. The first house we called
at the girls seemed kind of demOraliZed.
| don't know as l ever saw girl drunk,
but those girls acted queer. The callers
had stopped coming, and the girls were
drinking something out of shaving cups
that looked like lather, and they said it
was 'aig-nOgg. They lated and kicked
up their heels wuss nor circus, and
their collars got unpinned. and their
faces got red, and they put their arms
around me and my chum, and Rugged
us and then asked us if we didn't want
some of the custard. You'd died to see
me and my chum drink that lather. 1t
looked like sOapsuds with nut-maig in it
but by gosh 1t got in its work sudden.
At first was afraid when the girls hug
ged me, but after had drank couple
of shaving cupfulls of the aignOgg
wasn't afraid any more, and Rugged a
girl so hard that she catched her breath
and painted, and said, %, DON'T Then l
kissed her, and she lisa great big girl,
bigger than me, but she didn't care.
Say, did you ever kiss girl full Of aig-
nOgg? If you did, it would break up
your grocery business. You would want
TO waller in bliss, instead of selling
mackerel. My chum is no SLOUGH, either.
He was sitting in stuffed chair holding
another New Year girl, and could hear
him kiss her so it sounded like cutter
scraping on bare ground. But the girls
pa came in and said he guessed 1t was
time to close the place, unless they had
a license as an all night house, and me
and my chum went out. But wasn't we
sick when we got out doors? o, it SEEM
ed as though the pegs in my boots was
the only thing that kept them down, and
my chum he liked to dlde. He had been
to dinner and supper, and l had only
been skating all day. SO he had more to
contend with than did. D, my, but
that lets me out on aig-nOgg. L don't
know how got home, but got in bed
with pa, cause ma was called away to
attend a baby matinee in the night. l
don't know how it is, but there never is
anybody in our part of town who has
baby but they have it in the night, and
they send Tor ma. dent know why she
has to 0e sent for every time. Ma amt
to blame for all the young ones in town.
but she has got up a reputashun, and
when we hear the bell ring in the
night ma gets up and begins to put on
her clothes, and the next morning she
comes in the dining reom with a shawl
over her head, and says, It's girl and
baby. Ma was out on one of her profess
pa. had heard pa blame ma for her
as big as a rasin box, Just Zactly like
mas feet. and laid it right against the
small of pas back. couldn't help lHf-
fng, but pretty soon pa began to squirm
and he said, 'Why'n ell don't yau warm
them feet before you come to bedY and
then he hauled back his leg, and kicked
me clear out in the naiddle of the floor,
and said if he married again he would
marry woman who had lost both feet
On railroad accident. Then l put the
ice back ia bed with pa, and went to my
room, and i'm the lrlOrning pa said he
sweat mOre'n pail full in the night.
Well you must excuse me; I've got an
engagement to shovel snow off the side
walk. But before 60 let me advise you
not to drink aignogg, and don't sell TOM
eats for rabbits" and he got out the door
just in time'tO miss the rutabaga the
grocery man threw at him.