Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1883-07-13
Eeler; Rfahing.
The Bad Boy.

w Ide dlS yOu SWUNG luSiO loA Ani II
an hour for, staring at vacancy" said
the grocery man to the bad boy, as he
sat on stool by the stove one of these
foggy mornings, when everyone feels
like quarreling, with his fingers clasped
around his knee, looking as though he
did not know enough to last him tc
bed What you thinking about any
way:
was wondering where you would
have been to-day il Noah, had run his
ark into such Jog as this, and there
had been no iog-horn on Mount Ara
rat, and he had passed by it'll his ex.
curslon and not made landing, and
had floated around on the freshet I'm,
til all the animals starved, and DE ark
had struck snag and burst hole in
her b.ttom. l tell you, We can all
congratulate ourselves that Noah hap,
dened 10 blunder on that high ground
If that ark had been lost, either BY
being foundered, or being blowed nI
by the Fenians because Noah was al
Englishman, and it would have been
cold work trying TO populate this
world. In that case another Adam
and Eve would have to be made out
of dirt and water, and they might
have gone wrong again aid failed &c
raise a family, where wonld We have
been? l tell you, when think Of
the narrow escapes we have had, it is
/ Nr.:nlAr 10 that hurn nnf
along as well as We hare
Well, when did you get out of the
asylum said the grocery man, who
had been standing back with open
mouth looking at the boy as though
he was crazy. What you want is te
have your head soaked. You are get
ting so you reach out too for With tina,
small mind OF yours. In about an
other year you will want to run this
world yourself don't think you are
reforming very much. 1t is wlcket
for boy of your size to argue abou
such things. Your folks had better
send you TO college.
What do l want to 60 TO college
for, and be heartless hazer, and poo
base ball player. l can be bat
enough at home. The more | read
| the more | think. l don't believe
can ever be good enough to go tt
heaven, anyway and | guess will g
into the newspaper business, wher,
they have passes everywhere. Do yor
know. | think VIII, n | was built they
left out cog wheel or something il
nv head. | can't think like som,
BOYS. | get to thinkin about Adam
and Eve in the Garden OF Eden, anc
of the dude with the cloven hoof tina
fiirted with Eve, and treated her and
Adam to the dried apples, and L can
think of them as some boys do, with
fig leaf polonaise and fig leaf vests
| | imagine them dressed up in the lat
est style. | know it is wrong, blu
that is what a poor boy has to sufie
who has an Imagination, and where dit
II get the Imagination? This con
founded Imagination Of mine show
lme Adam with plug hat on, jus
like our minister wears, and a stant
up collar, and tight pants, ant
peak toed shoes, and Eve is pic
tured to me with crushed angle
worm eolored dress. and brown strip
ed stockings, and newspapers in ne
dress to make 1t set out, and ha
with dandelions on, and red paraso
and handkerchief, which she puts t
her lips and winks with her left eye t
the masher who is standing by th
corner of the house, in an attitude
while the tail with the dart one tn
end is wound around the rain barre
so Eve won't see it and get scarce
Say, don't you think it is better fo
a boy to think of his first parents wit
clothes on, than to think ofthem almos
naked, exposed to the inclemency of tn
weather, with nothing but fg-leaye
pinned on? l want to do right a
near as can, but | had rather thin
of them dressed like our folks are to
day, than to think Of them in u cy
CLIQUE with leaves for apparel. Say,
is wrong to fight, but don't you thin
if Adam had pat oil a pair of boxil
gloves, when he found the devil Wa
getting too fresh about the place an,
Knocked him cut in couple of rounds
ard pasted him in the nose, and fire,
) him ont of the summer garden, tina
lit would have been big thing 10
this world. Now, honest!
'Lookahere" SAID the grocery man
who had been iookin at the boy il
lismay, You better go right HON
and let your liza fix up some warn
drink for you and put you to bed
You ale all wrong i'll the head, and
you are hot attend, to you will hav
brain fever. l tell you, boy, you ar
in danger. Come, will 60 home wit
YOU 3
! %, danger nothin.' ! am inst tell
ing howlthings look to boy who ha
not got the facilities for being to-
good in his youth. Some boys Cal
take things as they read them, and no
think any for themselves, but | am
thinker from Thinkerville, and m
imagination plays the dickens witt
me. There is nothing Tread abou
!, old times but what l compare it will
the same line of business at the pres
ent day. Now, when | think OF tn
fisherman of Gailee, drawing thei
seines, wonder what they woul
, have done if there bad teen la,
! against hauling seine, as there is i
Wisconsin to-day, and / can see cor
stable with the arrest of the Galile
fisherman, snatohing the old apostle
J, and taking them to the police static
in q patrol w.Uon I know II 10 ypro,,