The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1883-02-28
With these words 1 close.
Visiting.
Minneapolis Tribune. !

minneapolis Irtbune.I
The need of regulation, the necessity OF
machinery to carry on social life has led TO
code of manners which by common con-
sent and common sense govern social life.
In regard to the matter in hand, the first
and most fundamental rule is never to take
people by surprise. This is cast iron and
inlexible. The reasons are obvious. How
irksome it is to have comPsny surprise"
one when the fall house cleaning has just
begun and the parlor and 'best room are
torn up; when John is down with the fever
and baby with the whooping cough; when
as sometimes happens to everybody-the
family treasury is empty and only lonely
nickel jingles forlornly against Johns
keys; or when you yourself are just ready
to start away to some quiet resort to spend
your vacation and get the rest needed for
another years hard pulling. 1t is safe to
say that visitors who thus take people by
surprise are wished in perditicn a dozen
times before they get away.
Worse than these are the mercensry peo-
pie who come to your house. if you live in
place they want to visit, for the purpose
of using il as 8 free hotel TO save paying
board bills. This is the principal reason
why relatives have each other by the ears
half the time. They presume upon each
others good nature. After giving due
weight to the ties of consanguinity, the
bare fact yet remains that q man is not un-
der special obligation to entertain, amuse,
and support fourth cousin who suddenly
makes himself known, unless he desires to
do so.
The safe way for relatives and oil othe,
people is to pay visits only when invited
For all ordinary purposes of friendship, the
short call is sufficient, and generally wei
come, but the entertaining of viai.ors undel
ones own roof is very different matter
snd something which requires an outlay Of
time, money and strength. To go to q
| friends door and demand these by coolly
saying you have come to make q visit is nc
better than TO ask him for gift of money
| indeed one would often be glad to pay
the money, if il were possible, and have the
guest gone. If you are Unexpectedly called
to New York and want to see aunt Sally
the right way is to go to hotel, and ther
send them word you are in the city, instead
of taking carriage ct once and having
yourself set down bag and baggage at Mrs
John Smiths door. They may have
houseful already, or may have gone t,
boarding, or they may have taken lodging
where they have only one bed. Now i
they want to visit with you, and if it i
convenient for them to entertain you
they will carry you off in spite of every
thing, and if it is not, they will have
pleasant chat with you, ask you to call
express regret at not being able to enter
tain you, And leave you domiciled at you
hotel upon your assurance that you vii
be comforts BILE there. This is no Sigh
and you have no reason to be offended
Better a short, pleasant chat with you
friends than forced visit which may b
inopportune and irksome to them. If un
able to pay hotel bills, it is better for on
to stay at home until ne is invited to pay
visit.
There are weighty reasons for the old say
ing "Short visits make long friends" ]
one does not overstay reasonable or az
appointed time his friends will not be sfrsit
at parting to ask him to come again an
stay longer. This is especially true @
those sensible guests who are able to anus
themselves part of the time, and VIII
are not constantly under foot demanding t
be entertained" Better short, plea;
ant visit, with your departure regretted b.
your friends, than to stay longer and acci
dentally hear them wondering 'when wi