Weekly Chillicothe crisis. (Chillicothe, Livingston Co., Mo.) 1878-19??, 1883-04-19

Sir Joseph Hooker, of London, pull
fishes a description of tree which ha
been discovered, called the "cow tree,
which gives milk when an incision !
made IN the bark. Several of the tree
have been brought to England, and the!
are Icing watched with much curiosity
Nothing could have been discovered tina
would more cifectually fill the bill, ant
fill the want long felt, than the COW tree
and we shall herald its introduction into
this country with great joy. The parties
who are interCstedin the propagation OF
the COW tree can send us two or three by
express. We do not want full sized COW
trees, but just saplngs, or calves. With
few such trees in the front yard, the
citizen can make up flccs at the driver
OF the milk wagon, and bid him defiance.
Instead Of going forth in the morning
armed with milk ticket and a tin basin,
a man can take his little hatchct and n
pail and cut hole in the COW tree, sit
down under its outrageous shade and
let nature take its course. The farmer
will have no more kicking cows to con
tend with, Int can let his COW tree milk
itself, while he sits down at the root of
his milk producer and smokes his pipe
or plays seven up with the hired man.
There will be no more hoistiug there, "
no tail to switch in his face, and no
more will the COW tree get nervous at
having its bag agtated by the rough
hand of the farmer, and kick the mix
pail over the fence, and kick the milk
stool through the granger. There will
be no more fodder to throw down, no
more bran mashes to mix, and no
calves to wean, as it is probable the
COW tree will he farrOw forever, and
not 90 brIlowiDg around trying to hook
the butcher who tries to take its calf
away. The COW tree will take work
of the tired farmer, and he can 90 to
town to attend the lodge without hur-
rling up the milking, as the girls can
mind the dairy. 1t will be mighty
poor girl that cannot milk a COW tree.
The improvements over the COW will
be numerous. BY building an Ice house
near the COW tree one can have ice
cream, and by the aid Of 4 handy jug
milk punch can be made TO the queen ;
taste. Instead Of driving the cows up
from the pasture at night, and stopping
them, and sitting cramped up, milking
with one hand and fighting mosquitoes
with the other, the farmers daughter
can have Il double seat under the COW
tIec, and take Il pail and n lover and
20 out to milk, and while the COW tree
is giving down its blessings, the young
people can put in the time sparkling.
Nofamily should be withoui COW tree,
and we trust the day is not far distant
when the old fashioned COW will only
be raised for beef, the calf that is now
more trouble than he is worth, will not
be tolerated at all, and the COW tree
will grow in profusiOn, always ready
to ill patent pail full of rich milk,
and not hook the daylights out of the
In the days that are coming
there will be no COW TO tie up nights,
no danger of a raid on the garden by
the horned, four footed tramp that un-
hinges gates, and no cow.bell to keep
a whole nelghborhood awake nights.
We take it for granted that the COW
tree will not wear cOw-bcll, and that
it will not below mournfully and paw
the earth when people are trying to
sleep. We hail the COW tree as Il
brother or sister, as the case may he,
and bid it welcome Good bye, old
You may have been q faith
ful servant, and have given milk when
You had TO, but You have gone off and
got lost when most We needed milk,
and when You camO back you were not
worth cont mental. You never knew
to come home without having
a barefootcd boy sent after you, and
you would eat lccks when you knew
we were going TO have company, and
your milk was bad. Step aside, brin-
lie, and give the COW tree chance.