davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
The Size OF Alaska.

Although Sitka and Alaska are almost
synonymous with north pole to average
minds in the temperate zone, a COM
parison of maps shows that Sitka and
st. Petersburg, Russia, are in the same
latitude, and the mouth of Chilcat river,
the most northerly point that we visited,
is on line with the south coast Of
Greenland. The extent of this north
west territory and the vast distances
between points are more than bewilder-
ing. Alaska itself is equal il area to
all of the United States east of the
Mississippi river. Counting the Aleu-
tlan chain, the Pirbyloff group, and the
LOO islands of the Alexander archi-
pelago, the total area of the Alaska
island is 3l,265 square miles. The
island of Attn, the last of the Aleutian
chain, is as far west of San Francisco
as Bangor, Maine, is east of it, and
the indented coast-line of Alaska,
measuring 20, 600 miles, is even greater
than the whole coast line of the Atlantic
and Pacific shores of the United States
put together Cor. st. Louis Globe
Democrat.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

A thousand articles might be devoted
to defining what is and what is not Pa
risian and yet no progress be made on
this peculiar subject. There is but one
way to know about Paris and that is to
lounge through its streets, cafes, thea
tiers, clubs and restaurants. 1t is Paris
which votes death by dynamite to all
aristocrats and it is Paris which goes
wild over ballet-dancers, 1t is Paris
which, at mi-careme, throngs the boul-
evard to assist at the ridiculous pro
cessions of Batignolles washerwomen,
and the next day goes en- masse to
carry flowers to Victor Hugo in honor
of the anniversary of his birth. Vol
taire's apostrophe-"Ah, Parisians Pa
risians! you never dance better than
when you are dancing around the
corpses of your brothers! !" is as true
to-day as when he uttered it. A Pa
risian is generous and cruel, amusing
and disgusting, polite and brutal, bon
vivant and a beggar, honest and dishon-
est in brief, much that is good and
much that is bad, and it is hard to say
whether his virtues or his vices are the
most humorous. San Francisco
Chronicle.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
Where He Had Us.

There were seven or eight of us in
the smoking-cr, and by-and-by the
conversation turned upon hotels. Six
of the crowd were going to stop off at
the same village in Georgia, and one
of them remarked:
well, gentlemen, you can make up
your minds to 60 through purgatory
tonight"
"Why?"
well, there is only one hotel in the
town, and that is run by the meanest
man south of the Ohio river"
"Do you know him ?" asked chap
who was suspected of being light
ning-rod agent from Chicago.
81 rather reckon"
"And what's he mean about?"
Everything. He has bugs in his
beds, uses beans in his coffee, his rooms
are dirty, and he's robber in his
charges.
"And there's no other hotel?"
mo. If there was he wouldn't get
custom enough to keep n cat alive.
He's the meanest man in the State of
Georgia, and if l ever catch him out
side of his town I'll put head on
him."
81 move that we resist any swindle
on his part" said drummer from Chi
Chicago.
IF I find bugs I'll fire the bed out
of the window" said n patent-churn
man from Ohio.
And thus it went on for half an hour,
everybody anticipating and predicting,
but the conversation finally closed by
the originator remarking:
well, we'll have to put up with it l
suppose, but you can make up your
minds to see the meanest, low-down,
hang-dog tavernkeeper in America.
1t was after dark when we reached
the village, and, after delaying awhile
with the baggage, five of us rode up
had disappeared, and we didn't see
him until we reached the hotel. Then
he was discovered behind the desk, O
pen over his ear, his coat off-in fact,
he was the identical landlord himself
One after another walked up, took a
look at him and fell back, and we had
adjourned to the veranda and were
talking of sleeping out on the grass
that night when he came out and said
Gentlemen, will you walk in and
register?"
One followed the other, and though
we all remained until the next evening,
not word was said nor hint dropped
about the conversation on the cars. 1t
was only as the train was ready to go
that he shook hands all around and
kindly remarked:
"The meanest, low-down, hang-dog
tayern-keep'er in America hopes to see
one and all again. Have cigar, gen
tlemen?"
We sent him gallon of wine and a
box of cigars from Augusta, but he was
still our creditor. Free Press.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
IL Isn't NV Turn.

In one of the general hospitals at
Nashville, when the place was first oc-
cupied by Union troops, there was a
queer character employed az nurse. He
was large man, troubled with dia-
betes. This untitled him for active
service, but did not give him the APP
pearance of an invalid. The boys be-
lieved that this man knew when a man
was going to die. Certain it was that
when the rapid decline in any man COM
menced the sympathetic old fellow took
his place at the bedside of the unfortu-
nate and was most untiring in his at
tention and kindnesses. In one row OF
cots he had closed the eyes of four men
in death in as many days. The next
man in order, going from right to left,
grew nervous and was removed out OF
the row. The second man shut his lips
and determined to get well. One night
as this man lay thinking over the mys-
terry of the fatal row." and trying to
reason about the old nurses strange in
stinct, he heard whisper from the cot
on the left, II say, stranger, if old Fat
ty comes and sits down beside you, hit
him one for me, will you? He hangs
around for fellow to die like dog
waiting for bone"
Days went by and the man with the
compressed lips was looked upon as the
next victim, and every time the nurse
passed the boys expected him to sit
down. One night the nurse came
through the ward, and discovering that
the second man was feverish, picked up
fan and sat down at the head of his
cot. Quick as thought the feverisfpa-
tent sprang up in bed and said wildly,
Take him first" pointing to the first
cot. "Yon old fool, can't you count?
You can't jump in this game, old fell
low. Clear out, now. None of your
sittin' down by me, when it isn't my
turn. First relief's gone, second re-
lief's gone, third relefs gone, fourth
relief's gone. Why don't you make the
fifth relief fall IMP" This was the whis-
erer of the night before, now almost a
maniac on the subject of the nurse. The
surgeon was called and the man was
quoted. But even when he was almost
well he dreaded the approach of the
sympathetic, kind old nurse. Such
superstitions were very common In the
hospitals of the army.-ChicdgO Inter
Ocean
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
Outrunning Death.

Think of q man getting seasick from
riding on locomotive engine" said
Counselor Farley, who shot down from
Philadelphia to Atlantic City at the
rate of more than mile n minute to
reach the bedside of his dying child.
"Seasickness is, of course, not the term
to apply to the disorder, but that ex-
presses it better than any other name 1
can think of. My ride created the
same feeling of wretchedness that few
hours on the ocean always gives me,
only instead of its being caused by the
rolling of vessel it was brought on
by the pitching and tossing of the loco
motive.
Il received telegram telling me of
my child's condition about 2 in the af-
ternoon. Every moment after that
seemed an hour. / realized how ex-
treme was the danger, for L had been
up for several nights with the little
one. / engaged special conveyance
at once. There was nothing but the To-
connective, and L sat in with the engi-
neer. Dispatches were sent ahead or
dering all regular trains TO run for sid
ings and remain until the engine
passed. We were about minute get
ting out of the business part of Cam
den. Then we flew, but no rate could
be too fast for me. AS we rushed
along, we enveloped ourselves in n
cloud of dust that was so thick some
times that could not see half dozen
yards ahead. The whistle screamed a
note of warning almost every second.
Jndeed IL seemed To my excited mind
that it was all one wild shrek, extend
ing from the Delaware to the sea.
After we had gone few miles the en-
CINE began to pitch and toss, and, as the
speed increased, the motion grew more
violent. Now we seemed to drop into
a gulf, then to rear into the air and,
again, as quick as thought, to be in the
act of leaping a creek. The trees and
fields and houses were like a long,
black, waving streak. 1 began to feel
faint and dizzy, and if it had not been
for the rushing wind fear must have
swooned in that terrible cab. The en-
gineer was perfectly cool. He after
wards declared that never before had
he gone at so high rate of speed for
so great distance. told him of my
feeling of sickness. Yes he said, L
have heard old railroad men tell
how passengers had been made seasick
by fast riding, but / have never seen it
before When we struck the meadows
and got a Whit of salt air braced up
a bit, but felt queer and unsteady on
NV legs, even after we had reached the
station and had alighted. / felt as if
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
TOpn0Ody.

Mr.. Topnoody was in moral humor
the other evening at supper and he in
troduced the subject of temperance.
MY DEAR" he remarked to his wife,
"did it ever occur to you what q vast
field of good is afforded the temperance
workers z"
We'll, no, Topnoody, I can't say 1
have; I've been so busy in the kitchen
and getting my fall sewing done that
really have not considered the ques-
tion," she responded at more length
than usual.
You should do so, my dear, because
it is q glorious work, and woman can
do more good there than in any other
field"
But how can a woman do work she
doesn't know how"
Easy enough to learn, my dear.
There is not, l presume, any woman
but who knows somewhere poor weak
brother to whom she could come as a
minister of grace, and by her kindly
questions. get from him his story and
pour into his wounded heart the balm
of Gilead."
Does she just have to ask questions,
Topnoody, and find out 2"
That's all, my dear. After that she
can strengthen the poor fellow, and
assist him by her counsel and more sub
stantial means"
IF that's the way Topnoody, I guess
I'll begin on YOU.
What, my dear? You surprise me !"
Il thought / would Now, Mr.. Tenn
perance Topnoody, tell me what is the
difference between drugstore whisky
and saloon whisky, and tell me again
what different brands you take, that
one makes you smell of coffee, another
of cloves, another of cardamon seed,
another of orris root and another of
lemon peel"
But, my dear"
Hold on, L. T., I'm asking ques-
tions now of n poor weak brother, to
whom / can come as a minister of grace,
and I'll pour in the balm later. The
next question is, why did you try to
sign your name to milk bill the other
evening with your night-key, and also
what principle of temperance prompted
you to fill the coal-scuttle with water
instead of coal, and then put the fire
out and raise frightful dust when you
poured it into the stove? Yes, Top
moody, and I'd like TO know, before /
shake up the balm of g., TO pour it
into the wounded heart, why you"
But the lady was interrupted by IL
door slamming, and Topnoody had dis
appeared. Merchant TrdUeter.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
tItIlow Clleeks

A pale, fiabby skin and limbs ill-clothed with
flesh, indicate poverty of the blood. The speed
lest and surest way 10 increase its multiplying
properties, TO impart vigor and compensate for
undue waste Of bodily tissue, is to use, with per
sistence and regularity, the Incompatible vital
izer and aid to digestion, Hostetters. Stomach
Bitters. A wineglassful of this agreeable med
icine elixir three times day soon manifestS its
benefcient action in an improvement Of appe-
tite, 81 aep and spirits, increased bodily sub
s ance, and the return of color and roundness
to haggard, wasted cheeks. This supreme pre-
ventive counteracts the effects OF severe mental
labor and bodily toll, anxiety OF mind, exposure
in rough weather, masma in air or water, and
tropical heat. 1t Is reliable safeguard against
fever and ague and rcmittent febrie disease,
and overcomes constipation, indigestion liver
complaint, rheumatism and other ailments.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
Dining with Apes.

When Isabella l.. Bird went to din
ner at Kwala Kangsa MALAY PENN
sula), the butler led in large ape,
and the Malay servant brought in a
small one, both of which were seated at
the table, and Sikh brought in q large
retriever and tied him to her chair.
These were Mr. Lows pets and daily
companions. This was all done with
perfect solemnity, and the dinner pro-
ceeded with stateliness. The apes had
their curry, chutney, pineapple, eggs
and bananas on porcelain plates, and so
had the guest. The chief difference
was that while she waited to be helped,
the big ape was impolite enough Gas if
he had been at a picnic) occasionally to
snatch something from n dish as the
butler passed round the table, aud the
small one before long migrated from
his chair to the table, and, sitting by
the lady's plate, delicately helped him
self from it. She declares that it was
a grotesque but most enjoyable dinner
party, because it required no CONVERSE
tional effort; and her companions we're
interesting.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

MR.. HENRY BARNES, the Tea and Coffee Merchant,
50 Houston Street, New Haven, Conn. writes on May
l6 1885 1T is with feeling OF gratitude and desire TO
benefit my fellow-nan that l write You these few
lines testimony 10 the value of the greatest OF all
medicines. Eight years have been q sufferer from
kidney disorder and Inflammation of the bladder.
Sometimes when passing water the pains were some
thing terrible, scadng. burning sensation with
tenton of urine with sharp pains in my side, loins
and back extending clear 10 the back Of my head,
tended to'make life miserable. have been treated
by number of our best physicians, and have used
any number of proprietary medicines all TO avail.
obtaining relief How long would have continued
in this way do not know in fact despared Of get
ting relief. until neghbor, who had been very mus
benefited by the of Hunts Remedy. advised Inc
to try il; and, although had faith that il would
reach my yet he spoke so highly of its great
merits decided to give il trial. and its has been
attended with the very best possible results. Twelve
hours after taking the first dose experienced relief
continued on in its until had used five bottles
when all the pains had vanished, my otherwise good
health returned. and free from all pains and
q well man. | am confident my cure has resulted
from the of Hunts Remedy, and that alone.
what IL has done for me positive IL Will do for
others. You at liberty 10 my name this
letter in manner you sec ht.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
An Adventure with n Lioness.

A portion of the crew of ship which
was anchored off the coast of India
once went ashore for the purpose of
cutting some wood, and one of the
sailors, having through some cause be-
come separated from his companions,
was considerably frightened by the APP
pearance of a huge lioness which he
saw approaching him. Much to his
surprise, however, she did not, on COM
ing up, appear to have any evil designs
on him, but instead crouched at his
feet and looked steadfastly first at his
face and then at a tree some little dis
lance away. For time the man could
not understand this conduct; but pres
emily, Oh the lioness rising and walking
toward the tree, looking back at him as
she went, he found out what it meant.
Up in the branches of tree was large
baboon with two little lion cubs in its
arms, and it was because of this that
the lioness was IN such trouble. The
difficulty now presented itself of how
to save the cubs, for the sailor was
afraid to climb the tree. So, having
his axe with him, he resolved to cut
down the tree, and this he did, the
lioness watching him most. anxiously
during the whole time. When the tree
fell and the three animals with it, the
loness, it is said, dashed with fury
upon tire baboon and destroyed it;
then having gently caressed her cubs
for some time, she returned to the
sailor, showed her gratitude by fawn-
ing upon him and rubbing her head
fondly against him, and at length car
ried away her offspring, one by one
HaIner'S YOu7l1 PeOpLe.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
Philosophy from "Punch."

Mamma-Both Smythe and Robson
were most attentive to Celia last night,
papa. Robson's good as gold, with the
temper of an angel-like herself-and
Smythe's heartless, selfish, dissipated
young fiend. do hope it will be Rob
son Papa-Well, don't know. HRob.
sons really all you say, she'll precious
soon get tired of him. Whereas, from
your description of Smythe, / fancy she
would be able to love him faithfully all
her life long Any woman would
Pater- Well, my boy, how, do you
like college? Alma Mater has turned
out some good men Young Hope
ful-Ya-as-she's just turned me out
He had been expelled
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
When Old Hickory Dined.

Years ago, when David Crockett was
a member of Congress and had returned
home at the close of the first session,
several of his neighbors gathered
around him one day and asked ques-
tions about Washington. What time
do they dine in the city," asked one.
Common people, such as we have
here, dine at l.. The big ones at 3; we
Representatives dine at 4; the aristoc-
racy and Senators eat at g." well,
when does the President fodder ?" "Old
Hickory" exclaimed the Colonel;
"well, he don't dine till next day."
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
Three Particular Points.

Point the Fi,s-BRowNs IRON BITTERs intoxicating
pound 1t tonic medicine a drink 1t sklfuy compounded
preparation made strength and health beverage be sold
bar-rooms and
Font the Sccona-BRowNs IRON BITTERs
injurious The delicate ladies and may
use with perfect safety and with advantage While powerful
its remedial agency genten its operation restoring wasted strength
and impartng robust health in the efficient
Point the Zh6d-BRowN's IRON BITTERs is made by
Chemical Company of Baltimore established
ton weknown the business world and the general community
There is risk in buying such medicine.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

MENssAN's PEPToMzED BEEF Tonic, the
only preparation of beef containing it's en-
tire nutritious properties 1t contains blood
making force generating and DEMONSTRATING
properties; invaluable for indigestion, dys-
pepsia, nervous prostration, and all forms
of general debility; also, in all enfeebled
conditions whether the result Of exhaustion,
nervous prostration, over-work, or acute
disease, particularly if resulting from pulmo-
nary complaints. Caswell, Hazard d Co.,
proprietors, New York Sold by druggists
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
HUNIORS.


The animal fluids of the body, when poorly nour-
ised. become vitated and eruptions TO appear
the akin. They Objectionable from their dis
fgurement, and vary in character from a constant.
uneasy sensation to a positive distress and severe
pain Hoods Sarsaparilla corrects the arrangement
Of the functions. enriches the fluids. purihes tho
blood, and changes the diseased condition 10 Of
health and vigor.
Pimp1es.
HALFoRD FLYNN of New York. had 20 many pimples
and blotches his face that he ashamed. He tried
various remedies without effect Hoods ssrsaparilla
purified his blood, and all blemishes disappeared.
Ringworm.
Ny brother is avictim 10 humor which brings ring
worms all over his face. He is using Hoods Sarsapa-
rla and already is so much benefited that his eyes
are no longer affected He will continue its use till he
feels fully cured-L. Il. HOWARD, Temple, N. n.
Rheum.
NV little boy was 30 badly afflicted with n humor
that we had TO mtten his hands 90 keep him from
rubbing the sores, which itched aud discharged a
wsery matter. Before he had finished one bottle OF
Hoods Sarsaparia the sores were heaed.-I,. j.
CLEMENT Merchant, Warner, N. H.
Hoods SarsapariIla.
Sold by Druggists. Of six for IS. Prepared only
BY G. l. HOOD 4 CO. Apothecaries. LOWELL Mass.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
More Dignihed.

well, and how about your mar
riage?" Il have broken it Off" you
haven't, have you?" Eyes. Ny in
tended father-i n-law wanted refer
ences." "And you were offended ?"
"Not at.all; only as 1 knew he would
broken off the engagement afterward, L
preferred to have the start Of him, and
broke it off myself 1t is more digni-
fed, you know. "-NelU York World.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

CirlRRH -Messrs Hood & Co, of Lowell,
believe that the be t way to treat Catarrh,
through the blood constitutional dis
case requires constitutional remedy.
Hood Sarsaparilla is blood purifier and
constitutional medicine that can be relied
upon, and has cured numerous cases of Ca
taIrh. We think this claim a reasonable one
and gladly give il room in our columns
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

had Just come in from rough sea voy-
age. But I was in time. I once more
saw the light of my child's eyes, fading
fast, indeed, but still instinct with life,
and in that everything else was for
gotten. "-PhilddelDhid Times.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
PersonaI,-ro Men oniyt

THE voLTAIc BELT Co., Marshall, Mich.
will send DIR. Dyes Celebrated Electro
Voltaic Belts and Electric Appliances on trial
for thirty days TO men young or old who
are afflicted with nervous debility, lost vi.
tally and kindred troubles guaranteeing
speedy and complete restoration of health
and manly vigor Address as above. n b. -
No risk is incurred, as thirty days trial is al
lowed
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

ALL our lady friends will be delighted to
hear that L Cragin q Co. ,ll6S 4th st Phila
are giving first class Piano Sheet Music, vocal
and instrumental, gratis NO advertising on
it Write for catalogue. Mention this paper.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
An insurance agent named Pyle

An insurance agent named Pyle,
In running fell over the stile,
st. Jacobs Oil gave relief,
And the pain was SO brief,
He got up and said: Il should smile.
A lame old lady at Keyser,
Had no one to advise her,
Till Doctor John Boyle,
Tried st. Jacobs Oil,
Its action did simply surprise her.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
PUT I'm" mt the GauIt House.

The business man or tourist will find
fiis.-class accommodations at the low price
OF g. and $40 per day at the Gault House,
Chicago, corner Clinton and Madison streets
This far famed hotel is located in the center
of the city, only one block from the Union
Depot Elevator; all appointments first
class II. w. HoYT, Proprietor.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

THE income of the London mission
airy societies of all denominations
amounts to some 100000. The
Bible and tract societies add over 81
000, 900 more to this grand total.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

ALL pleasure must be bought at the
price of pain. The difference between
false pleasure and true is just this
for the true the price is paid before you
enjoy it; for the false, after you enjoy.
-JOh1l Foster.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20

Half the people are suffering and many
die from this fatal complaint Diseases Of
the kidneys and liver are the principal
causea AS a cure, we can recommend Ger
man Hon Bitters Journal Of Health.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1883-09-20
Look Out for Frauds !

The genuine "Rough on Corns" is made
only by L. S Wells proprietor of Rough OF
Rats"), and has Ching face of q man or
labels l5c and 25c Bottles