The times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1882-1897, 1883-09-07
It Didn't Hit.

There was chap on the boat who
lived at Jackson, Miss. and he was tell
ing us many anecdotes regarding the
negro population. Among others, he
had friend who one day asked of an
aged darkey:
"Well, Colonel, what particular ossi-
lfications of latee"
The old man gave pull at mis- hat
with one hand, and scratched his head
with the other, and answered.:
''Wall, sab, reckons dat was him
gwine down de road few minits ago
on top of mewl!'
There was a passenger from Rhode
Island who was greatly amused by these
anecdotes, and two or three times after
wards caught him hunting in a die
tionary for big words and stringing them
together. When we arrived at Natchez
ne was all loaded up. A lot of us went
up to see the town, and as we gained
The crest of the long and dusty hill we
Here was the chance the smart Aleck
had been waiting for, and he halted her
and demanded:
Madam, have you systemized the
disability of the precocious influenza
this morning?'
"What's dat you remark?"
81 percolated the interrogation as to
whether you had ambuscaded the gil
gantic verbosity," he continued.
mo, sab, l hasn't" she said as she
removed the basket from her head, "Dut
Ize pwine To rioht aWay!''
With that she brought him q clip with
her hand on the ear, and followed it up
by bunt in the back that sprawled
him into the dust and left him gasping
like fish.
IF de verboshity wants emmy mo- he
can foller me down to de levee!' she
remarked as she walked off; but he
didn't. He was dust from head to foot,
his humorous nature had evaporated,
and he got back to the boat to keep his
berth for the next eight hours. The
negro is an odd coon at times, but there
are other times when the Gigantic YER
bosity" doesn't hit his funny-bone with
in a rod:-M Quad.
Rev, G. W.. Offiey, New Bern, N. c.,
says: 81 have taken Browns Iron Bitters
and consider it one of best medicines
known"
THE TINES is under special obliga-
tons to Clark ID, Smith, ESQ.,, of
Corunna, now in San Francisco, for
copy of the Morning Call, contain
ing succinct history of the Knights
Templar organization. 1t is a valu-
able document which we have flied
for future use.
SHE WAS SCREAMING WITH PAIN.
Crawford County, Pa,
City of Titusville.
Personally appeared before me Mary
Murray, who, being duly sworn accord
ing to law, deposes and says: That she
resides at the corner of Franklin and
Water SITS. of said City. That she was
suffering with excruciating pain from the
inflammatory rheumatism for the space of
seven days, that she was screaming with
pain and got no rest all this time; that she
received relief within twenty minutes af.
ter taking the first dose of Wilson's Light
ming Remedy for Rheumatism. and went
to sleep. And that she had permanent
cure within ten days, and that she was up
and about in five days. Mary hurry.
Sworn and subscribed to before me
this 18TH day of of April, 1880.
]. B. d. Clarke
Justice of the Peace
Farrand, Williams, & Co
Agents Detroit.
Owosso lodge No. $40, 1. o. G. T.
will hold an open lodge on Monday
evening September 10th. A fine lit
efary and musical entertainment will
be provided. The public are mos
cordially invited. Hall over Ist Ma
tional Bank, sd floor.
Diphtheria finds in Home Relief ant
Davis Pills, the needed blood purifier
and stimulant, combined to effect SAFE
and speedy cure 20
The second story front of d. Dim
mick & Sons new block will be oc
,cupied by DR.. III. b. Peterson as &
dental office. 1t will be one of the
pleasantest rooms in the city, anc
the DIR. is to be congratulated or
having obtained so desirable a loca
ton for his business office.
Mr.. Joseph Blair, Ludington, Masor
| Co., Mich, says: II can recommend
Browns Iron Bitters as good tonic ant
! strengthened