The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1883-05-26
Self-Possession.
tie MiIdtlclDhid .Lc,lger:

From tie Philadelphia Lcolgcr:
There is a certain feeling of calm power
that always attends the fact of possession.
When we are struggling and hoping for
what we desire, we are eager, excited and
in measure unstrung; but when wefinally
obtain it, we become, as far as that one
thing goes, restful and assured. Now of
all possessions that can possibly be secured,
there is none which gives this quiet and
dignifed sense of power so thoroughly as
the possession of self To feel quite sure
that we truly possess any single power or
faculty, that we have it under our con-
troll and can use it at our pleasure, is
source of great happiness and peace of
mind, and those who are fortunate enough
to have this sense Of possession extended
over many of their faculties are to be warm
ly congratulated.
elf-possession, however, is something
apart from ability. 1t is more in one di-
rection and less in another. Many persons
of great abilities are painfully lacking in
self-possession, and others of very small
powers are rarely at loss. 1t comes rather
through fair degree of self-knowledge and
practical exercise of those abilities, great
or small, which we do possess Our own
experience shows us this. Most of us are
self-possessed in at least one direction, and
that we shall find to be the one in which
we have had the most constant practice and
the best opportunities of testing ourselves.
The mechanic or business man, or artist or
philosopher, may be undecided, vaclllatlng,
constrained and i'll at ease in general So
ciety or in political circles, or in hundred
other situations, but in their respective en-
ployments or in matters closely connected
with them, they at once assume calm and
assured manner that tells of their regained
self-possassion The business partner who
has charge of a manufactory will sometimes
lose all his self-pOssession when obliged to
attend to a customer, while the regular
salesman will be utterly confounded if left
to deal with the operatives. One woman
will be cool, dignifed and assured in her
home, but timid and nervous in society;
another is thoroughly self-possessed in the
presence of strangers, but tremblcs before
her own servants. One person hates to
write letters, putting it off from day to day,
afraid of his own handwriting, or of the
blunders he may commit, while in CONVEX
sation he is ready, fluent and self-possessed.
Another writes easily, without fear or hes
itation, but breads to open his lips in COM
pany. An intelligent man Of sixty years
of age stood at one time stammering for
five minutes before number of waiting
people, when all he had occasion to say was
''Yes." His self-possession had left him,
and had taken with it almost the very
power of utterance. Some persons are cool
and self f-possessed in moments of emergen-
cy; when every one else is quiverlng with
terror they know just what to do, and at
once take command of the situation. 9th
ers, whose knowledge may be in no way
inferior, lose all control of it in sudden ex
igencies. Most of the panics that occur
in times of fire or accident, and that sacri-
flee thousands of lives are due, not to ig-
norance, but to the utter loss Of self-pos-
session by the crowd. Could each indi-
vidual obtain authority over himself, and
do what he actually knows to be the best
thing, the panic would cease, and the chief
danger would be over.
Much of this valuable quality is gained
by a sensible education in early years.
There are certain things so sure to be need
ed in every life that they ughtto command
particular attention in youth. Every child
should be accustomed to express him.
self freely and often, both in speaking and
writing, and be taught the proper methods
of doing both; he should become used to
the presence of strangers, and the atten-
tions due to them; he should be habituated
to changes of scene and employment, and,
above all, should be led to fix his attention
upon things outside of himself, so as. to
save him from that self-consciousness which
lies at the root of much painful bashful-
ness, timidity and nervous apprehensions.
Thinking much about self, especially about
the impressions we have made, or are going
to make upon others, tends always to de-
prive us of self f-pOssession. We grow anx-
ious and perturbed, lose our simplicity and
naturalness and fall into the very blunders
that we dread. These frequent failures
weaken our courage and make us shrink
more and more from what we ought boldly
to approach
OF course, there is vain self-confdence
which rushes unahashed into every scene
and feels equal to undertake whatever is
presented. This, however, is very differ
ent from the self-possession which comes
from a true estimate of our own powers.
He who possesses himself this latter sense
will be as careful to abstain from what he
is unable to perform; as to execute what
ever rightly falls to his lot. He will be as
modest and unassuming as he is energetic
and unfinching, for he will know his limi
tations as we'll as he does his powers. The
best practical way of securing this self-pos-
session, where we feel its lack, is in con-
tinual practice. As we have said, there
are certain things which every one should
be prepared to do, certain scenes that every
one should be prepared to enter, certain
crises that every one should be ready to
meet. These none of US must shrink from
when they come, but do our best every
time, manfully and resolutely, calling to
our aid all the reason and good sense that
we can command. Each time we force
ourselves to this course the task grows cas-
ier, and at length we arrive at that condi-
ton of calm assurance with regard to our
performance of them, which alone gives
selfpossession.
The Hair After Death.
IL