The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1883-04-19

1 =
body learned the parrot some new
thing to say. A parrot that can
only say "Polly wants cracker
don't amount to anything. What
we need is new style parrots that
can. converse on the topics of the
! day, and say things original. Well.
when ma got back I guess her con-
science hurt for the way she had
been carrying on in Chicago, and
so when she heard the basement of
the church was being frescoed she in.
yited the committee to hold the
Wednesday evening prayer meeting
at our house First, there were
four people came, and ma asked pa
to stay to make quorum, and pa
said. seeing he had two pair, he
guessed he would stay in, and if
ma would deal him a queen he
would have full hand. / don't
know what pa meant, but he plays
draw poker sometimes. Anyway
there were eleven people came in
Guiding the minister, and after they
had talked about the neighbors a
spell, and ma had showed the wo.
men a new tidy she had worked
for the heathen, with a motto on it
which pa had taught her, ga con-
trite heart beats bob.tailed fush," !"
and pa had talked to the men
about a religious silver mine he
was selling stock in, which he ad-
vised them as friend to buy for
the glory of the church, they all
went into the back parlor and the
minister led in prayer. He got
down on his knees right under the
parrots cage, and you'd dide to
see polly hang onto the wires of
the cage with one foot and drop an
apple core on the minister's head.
Ma. shook ber handkerchief at
Polly, and looked sassy, and Polly
| got up on one perch and as the minis
ter got warmed up, and began to
raise the roof, Polly said, 80 dry
up" The minister had his eyes shut,
but he opened one little and bol:-
ed at pa. Ia was tickled at tie
parrot, but when the minister loos..
ed at pa, as though it was him
making irreverent remarks, pa was
mad. The minister got to amen
and then Polly shook himself and
said, "What you giving us" and
the minister got up and brushed
the bird seed off his knees, and he
looked mad. thought ma would
sink with modification, and / was
sitting on a piano stool, looking as
Ipious as Sunday school superin-
tendant before he skips out with
the bank funds, and ma looked at
me as though she thought it was
me that had been tampering with
| the parrot. Gosh, / never said q
word to that parrot, and 1 can
prove it by my chum. Well, the
minister asked one of the sisters if
she would pray, and she wasn't en-.
gagged, SO she said with pleasure,
and she knceled down, but she
corked herself cause she got one
knee on cast-iron dumb bell that
I had been practicing with. She
said 30 N.Y." in disgusted sort of
a way, and t!!en she began to pray
for the reformation Of the youth of
the land, and asked for the spirit
to descend on the household, and
particularly on the boy that was
such a care and anxiety to his
parents. and just then Polly SAID,
30, pull down your vest" Well,
you'd a dide to see that woman
! look at me. She looked at ma as
though she was wondering why she
didn't hit me with poker, but she
went on, and Polly said, 'Wipe off
your chin," and then the lady got
through and got up, and told ma it
must be great trial to have an
| idiotic child, and then ma was mad
and said it wasn't half so bad as ii
was to be a kleptomaniac, and then
the woman got up and said she
wouldn't stay no longer, and pa
said to me to take that parrot out
doors, and that seemed to make
them all good natured again. Ma
| said to take the parrot and give it
to the poor. I took the cage and
pointed my finger at the parrot.and
| it looked at the woman and said
ssold cataramaran," and the woman
tried to look pious and resigned
but she couldn't. AS I was going
out the door the parrot ruf1ed uE
his feathers and said, Dammit, sci