The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-05-01
The Quaker Detective.

We were i've passengers I'D all
two ladies on the back seat. and {
middle-aged gentle and quake
on the middle, and myself in tht
front.
The middle aged gentleman wa;
sprightly and talkative. He soon
struck up an acquaintance with The
ladies. toward whom, in his zeal to do,
he rather overdid the agreeable-bow
ING. and smiling. and chatting over
his shoulder in a way painfully sug'
gestive. at his time OF life, If ''crick.
ia the tick. He is evidently gay 10.
thario.
The Quaker wore the uniform oil
his sect and confined his speech, as
many a parliamentarian would save
his credit bv doing. to simply yeas
and "nays." As for myself | make
it an invariable rule of the road to
be merely locker on and listener.
Toward evening ! was aroused from
one of those reveries into which a
Young man, W thout being poet or a
lover, will sometimes fail, by an abrupt
query from the laxative gentleman.
"Are you armed, sir ?"
Il am not" answered, astonished
no doubt visibly. at the question:
II am sorry to hear it," he replied /;
''for before reaching the next stopping
place it will be several hours In the
night. and we must pass over por-
ton of the road on which more than
one robbery is reported to have been
committed
The ladies turned pale, but the
stranger did his best to reassure them.
Not that [ think there is the slight
est danger at present" he continued |;
only when ore is responsible for the
safetv of ladies. you know, suck thing
AZ nistn' ia reach would materially
add to ones confidence"
Your principles, my friend" adj
dressing the Quaker. 81 presume. are
as much opposed::to as to using carnal
weapons"
Yes" was the response.
Have the villains murdered any
Of their victims ?" the elderly lady
nervously inquired.
"Or have they contented themselves
with-with -plunderiDg them ?" add
ed the younger in timorous voice.
Decidedly the latter" the ami
able gentleman FASTENED to give as
suraDce land we are none of us
prepared to offer resistance in case of
attack. SO nothing worse than robbery
can possibly befall us.
Then after Blaming his thoughtIess-
ness in having unnecessarily intro
duced a disagreeable subject. the gen.
tleman quite excelled himself in lis
efforts to raise the spirits of the COM
pany. and had succeeded so we'll by
the time night had set in that all had
quite forgotten. or remembered their
fears to laugh at them.
Our genial companion fairly talked
himself hoarse; perceiving which he
took from his pocket a bex of newly
invented cough drops" and. after
passing it to the ladies. be helped
himself to the balance and tossed the
paper out of The window.
He was in the midst of a high en-
comium on the now postrum; more
than half the eficaco of which, he
insisted, depenled on its being taken
nv suction, when shrilI whistle was |
heard, and slmost Immediately the |
coach stopped. while two faces, hid
eously blackened. presented them
selves at each window.
"Sorry to trouble you;'' said the
man on the right. acknowledging with
q bow two lady-like screams from the
back seat. "but business is business,
and ours will soon be over if things 60
smoothly
'Of course, gentlemen. you will
spare. as ia al may be consistent with
your disagreeahle duty. the feelings of
these ladies. appealed the polite pas
senger, in his bIandest manner.
"Oh certainly; they shall be first
to and shall not be required
to leave their places. unless their con.
duct renders it necessary"
And now, ladies'" continued the
robber, the barrel of his pistol glitter
in the light of the coach lamp, sbe so
good as to pass your purses, watches.
and such other trinkets as may be
accessible without too much trouble"
The ladies came down handsom civ,
and Were not further molested.
One by one the rest got out. The
geptlemen's turn came
first. He submitted with winning
grace, and was robbed like a very
NlonAo-Gall