Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-03-15
WIT AND HUM0B,

taxes on and can't sell.
The apothecary clerk and the bar
tender mix ia all kinds Of company.
Gen. Joe Johnston has been poisoned
by the dye in bis stockings tits better
than dying in his boots.
The government wants to sell 10000
condemned cannon-balls. The moths
have probably been working at them.
Puck says: aged fishermen are uSu-
ally the most successful. Long years OF
practice makes prevarcaton perfect.
Railroad men know nothing Of the
bumper at parting. It is the bumper
- sudden meetings that stirs them up.
The King Of the Sandwich Islands
locks himself in when he gets drunk.
This is VIII, sou never hear Of his being
sent up.
Practice makes perfect True; but a
man can continue to drop hot horse
shoe as readily the first time trying as
the second.
A scientist says that careless cooks
kill more people than careless drug
gists. This would seem to indicate that
nalr IS POISONOUS
The railway passenger agents are dis
cussing the bicct Of transportation Of
corpses Ills viii, no doubt. be Of in
terest to dcad-hcads.
Here's pretty fix The government
doen't know what TO do with the wealth
or bureau, and the people don't know
what to do with the weather.
Susan b. Anthony is going across the
sea to talk Woman's rights 10 kings,
queens and dcspots. If she should hap
pen to fall In love over there, ch?
Nine, Modjeskn say, her name prop
crly spelled Is AIodczojewska But
what Of that? our emma Abbott's
real name is ijcmmai ltjabbot
The harbingcrs Of spring have made
their appearance, and can be seen most
any day seated on dry goods box in
front OF the tore, whiting soft pine.
An old lady near Reading won't let
her husband visit that city since she
read that Reading maketh II full
man.
\ Virginia man is laboring under the
delusiou that he is a horse, but he isn't.
There are however, many men who are
lir-t-class donI,eys, and they don't know
it,
II was an cntcrprising sight to see %
newsboy Gown in the bottom wading
around up TO his knees in the water
~houiing Here's your paper, all about
the Hood
4 Louoop"- adyertiscs u powder
which wi prevent cats running around
ard maxi r noise at night II is
black and I, put into gun and makes
n noise et
1t takes hu, thirteen minutes 20 lead
an elephant on train, while it takes
twenty foi amy sort of woman to Kiss
her friends goodbye and lose the check
for her trunk
The Arizona papers are bewailing the
death Of Wagner because, they say, Inc
was the only man who ever had the
nerve to start an opposition 10 the
Pullman CIR Company.
4 lady writes story about "AIy IIus-
band Secret. He must have been Il
young husband TO have admitted he had
one. IL Oh married man knows bet
ter than to DO SO.
Yes. su. said the wooddcalcr, II
prefer 10 sell wood to men who do their
own saving You can't convince man
who has worked all day at wood pile
that there mt q full cord Of it,
Ii /, ss,l that Marian, the Amazon
Queen. who IN now exhibiting at elias
gov, measures eight feet high in her
stocking Pretty long stockings; but
why don they give us her full height?
The sto-, "a told. it may OF may not
be true 1rt during = free fight in q
Chicago saloon man was shot in the
mouth. lut escaped injury through the
ball ilattcuiug itself against his breath.
Jay toaia 70 SAID To nave wcpt NJ 81
play in Ncg York We do not know
what the pay was, but it was probably
a new yrr-ica Of Fox and Geese, in
which IL. grr,a goJ away with the foN.
Prof Proctor speaks of 100000
wears ago q calmly as any other man
would remark OF last Gourth Of July.
II Is wha' h0s happened in the last fifty
years tha, has worried most of us.
4 Russian o'1'mjng he a noblcmau,
has been rrctel i'm Boston for getting
money under false pretenScs Although
speaking seven languages he was unable
10 tell the truth in any one Of them.
Mrs Mark Hopkins, Of san Francis
60, gave her niece, who recently mar
ried her adopted son. 100000 rs n
wedding present They now think Of
taking in the Niagara ON their wedding
tDur