Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1883-02-22
The Bad Boy.
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"W hAr ], thn' ,Jlif au ,o4r ,h.rt ou>um,
that .osk, Ike ,oAu .ry,.r p" sad TIE rr,-
ccs, mlu 4. th, hAl Hl, Il, hr came lu,n
tr- gruarry tle utNt morning. AMER Crt>t-
ma,.
lar bll ,ppAr,! al hj, ,hir' front. pur hI,
i .rr, uu ihc >tuH Aud ,m..l.I VI n., hu-
gers, ana then sad 40, that q, nothing
but rt.e Of the turk, dressing amt
gravy. Nou ,ec after pa Ann gar BACK
from the roller skating NIX YESTERDAY. pa
va, ~. broke up aud hr couldn't carve the
turkr,, ani HID ~ 4p ID. md "a .at ia 4
stuffed char With hI, head ticd up and a
pillow amongst hi, .rg-, and he kcpt com
planning that didn't IN ii night. COL darn
turkey anyway, | should think they would
make turkr, flat on The back 50 he would
!ak on greasy platter without skating
all around the table. 1t look. 80 cas,
10 see pa carve a turkey. but when |
speared into the bosom nf that turkey and
began 70 saw II, the turkey rolled
around though II was on casjur-. and It
vas all ! could DO 10 keep IL out Of ma,
lap But ! ra>srlrd with Il tin got of
enough white meat for pa and ma, and dark
meat enough for me, and | dug out the
dressing. but most of il fiew into ms shirt
bosom cause the string that tied up the place
where the dressing aa- concealed about the
person III THE turkey, broke piemaJurely
and one OYSTER hit pa IN the eve, and he said
! was - wkward a. a cruss-tyed glrl irving
% Ai-> 4 man with hair Tip. Ii ever ge
to b. urad OF a famll, | shall carve turkeys
with corn-she.ler.'
But what broke Your pa up at the roller
skating rink r. asked tie grocery man.
80. everything broke him up. tie is
split UP 70 ma buttons the top OF his pants
To hl, collar button, Ike a bicycle rdrr
Well. he no business to have told me and nv
chum tha, he used 10 be the best skater in
North America, when he was boy. He
SAID he ,Aated once from Albany TO New
York IN an hour and eighty minutes. Me
and my cnum thought If pa vas such a ter
ror on skates, We would get him 10 put on ii
par Of roller skates, and euter HIM the
great unknown, and clean out the whole
gang. We told pa that he must remember
that roller skates were different from ice
skates, and that maybe he couldn't skate on
then. but he sand il didn't make anN diff
ference what they were a. long they were
skates, and he would Just paralNze the
whole crowd. SO We got pair of big roll
er skates for him, and while We we're strap
ping them on. pa looked at the skaters glide
around on the smooth waxed floor Just as
though they we're creased. Pa looked At
the skates on hls feet, after they we're fast
ened, sort Of torlorn like, the way a horse
thief does when they put shackles on hi,
leg, and told hun if he was afraid be
couldn't skate with them We would tax,
them off. but he said he would beat any
hnlx rb.rp IA. htt.f a Thar
we Strengthened pa up and pointed him to-
ward the middle of the room, and he said
'eggo,' and We just gave him little push
TO start him, and he began TO 90. Well, hy
gosh you'd dlde to have seen pa try to
stop. You see, YOU can't stick in your
heel and stop like YOU can on ice skates
aud pa soon found that out. and he began to
turn sideways, and then he threw his arms
and walked on his heels, ami he lost his hat
and his eyes began to stick out, cause he
was going right toward an IRON post One
arm caught the iron post ana he clrcled
around il few times, and then he let 20.
and began to fall. and. sir, he kept falling
all across the room, and everybody got out
OF the way, except girl, and pa grabbed
her by the polonaIse, like drowning man
grabs at straws, though there wasn't any
straws in ker polonaIse as ! know Of, but
pa Just pulled her along though she was
done up in Shawl strap, and his feet went
out from under him and he struck on his
shoulders and kept going, with the girl
dragging along like bundle Of clothes. If
pa had had another pair Of roller skates on
his shoulders and castors on his ears, he
couldn't have slid along any better. Pa is
short. big man, and as he was rolling
along on his back he looked like a sofa with
castors on being pushed across the room by
a girl. Finally pa came to the wall and
had to stop and the girl fell right across
him, with her roller skates in his neck, and
she called him an old brute, and told him if
he didn't let 90 of her polonaise she would
murder him. just then my chum and me
got there, and we amputated pa from the
girl and lifed him up, and told him for
heavens sake to let US take of his skates,
cause he couldn't skate any more than .
Gov. and pa vss mad and said for u 70 let