The Osceola times., 1883-07-21
COLLEGE BRED.
The Horse Editors Homely Talk 10 Fresh
Young Graduates.
Chicago Tribune.

piciously new, and upon whose face there
was complacent, self-satisfed .expres-
sion, stood in the doorway of the editor
ial rooms and propounded the above IN
terrogatory in very loud and declama-
tory tone of voice.
81 suppose you can" said the horse re-
porter, unless YOU are afflicted with
some constitutional malady which prevent
your putting one foot in front of the
other, or have got pair of hobbies on.
There have some daisy fellows come up
here lately, but you are the first one that
wanted to know whether he could 60
through an open door"
81 didn't mean exactly that" continu-
ed the young man. "What wanted to
was if could come into the room for a
few minutes"
Certainly you can; only don't say any
thing to the effect that we ought to have
a pleasant summer aftet such rainy
spring, or you may find yourself pallid
corpse in the d)njon keep beneath the
moated turrets of the castle. Hyou are
looking for the Hawkinsville Clarion or
the Grundy County Palladium, you will
find them in that pile of papers over in
the corner. you are aweary, and fain
would WOO the drowsy god, ask the man
in next room for the Boston Advertiser
A Boston paper will make insomnia flee
as the black wraiths of despair and des-
olation vanish before the golden rays of
hope. Don't mistake yon haggard paste
pot for cup-custard, because in its con-
tents there is generous admixture of
deceased cockroaches that but few
short days agone were members of happy
family circles-nov, alas, sundered by
the cruel hand ofdarksome and unrelen-
ting fate"
Il did't want to read any exchanges"
said the young man. "The object of my
visit was to see the principal editor-the
one who makes engagements with Jour
nalits."
"The WHAT"
"The editor who makes engagements
with journalists"
"Oh, YOU mean the man that hires the
hands. He's in the other room. Do
you want job?"
"Well," said the young man in a rather
naughty manner. 81 have some thought
of entering the journalistic profession y
"You mean that you want to hire out
as a deckhand on newspaper, don't
you?"
perhaps that is your way ofexpressing
it, SIR" said the young man, "but our
professor of rhetoric always told us that
ooh, you're college graduate, are
YOUR said the reporter. 81 thought you
had kind of I-sball-now- go forth and
take-charge-of-affair air about you.
suppose you graduated last week."
Yes, sir" was the reply, "and l may
say that my Grafton - w.
II know all about it." interrupted the
horse reporter. "You spoke piece
about Life's Mission,' or Our Country S
Future or something like that, and
when YOU had finished it the young
lady in the percale dress whom you have
been taking to the weekly meetings of
the Platonian Literary Society for the
last two years sent big boquet up to
the platform for you with little piece of
rose-tinted note-paper in the center of it
with From One Who Admires Genius
written on it. And then a lot ofTeuton-
ic musicians blew themselves black in
the face playing the Star Spangled Ban
ner. And in the evening you went to
the Presidents reception with the female
admirer of Genius, and on the way home
YOU told her that now you were about to
enter upon new sphere of action, to 60
forth and do battle with the world, and
crave for yourself . niche high in the
Temple of Fame, you felt that you must
tell her how your whole existence was
wrapped up in pure, holy love for her
"A love that would never falter or fade
, as long as life remained And then she
laid her head trlstfully on your manly
breast, and said that she wouldnot try to
, conceal from you the fact, ever present
E in her heart that you were the one ma II
: +, in all the wide, wide world upon whom
she could freely bestow that most pre-
ciods of all gifts-the tender, true and all
: absorbing love of pure woman. But in
, about five years things will look differ
ent. There are now more young men
!. who started out to crave niche high in
I, the Temple of Fame chasing large red
! steers over the arid plains Of Texas oi
: delivering mackerel to the first families
than YOU can shake stick at"
"But surely, sir, you do not mean tc
, insinuate that college education is in
any way hindrance to the accomplish
I ment OF those ends which it should evel
be the aim of all who have the welfare
2 of their country at heart to bring about?'
That's just the trouble" said the horse
reporter. "You college graduates always
. starts out with the idea that it is you
I mission to manipulate the entire uni
, verse, when as a matter of fact the mos
$ of YOU wouldn't do to leave in charge o
one small backyard. Because young
: man knows all about the square of the
G hypothenuse, and can reel off chunks o
!, Roman history, il does not necessarily
I follow that there is a wide competition
{ among businessmen for his valuable ser
! vices. If the employers of America never
J 90 lame until their legs give out from
!. running after college graduates there viii
' be the soundest lot of underpnning OF
S record in this country. Erudition is {
: fine thing, but you can't get much boarc
on il in this town"
But, SIR" said the graduate, "the an
nails ofevery country in which the high
est civization has obtained shows that i
is the men of letters who shape
) the destines--"
Z There YOU go again." said the hors,
A reporter, talking about shaping destinei