The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1883-06-20
An Hour m tIle Mayors Court.

An Hour in The Mayors Court.
One day last week the Mayor was
sitting in his Office, thinking ofhis
farm on Three Mile, Of the rank
tall wheat holding to the soft sum.
mer breeze, Of the lowing herd graz
ing upon The forty acres Of sweet,
succulent blue grass, and Of his
thirty acres ofcorn laughingin the
sunshine and growing an inch a
day, when his bncolic meditations
were disturbed by the entrance of
Lijah, who announced in thrill
ing dramatic tones that he had i'm.
INJURED in his dungeon cells several
DRINKS and disorderlies. "Bring
them into my presence, Lijah, and
1 will dispense justice to them
with a liberal hand" quoth the
Mayor.
The first case was the Town Of
Point Pleasantagainst John Cajoles.
Lijah remarked "that he had found
Mr.. Cajoles, sweelly sleeping, aye,
perchance dreaming, in the court
house yard on the night before,
and for fear that his peaceful slum,
bers might be disturbed by the
thoughtless passer-by he had taken
him to his castle and put him
away" "Mr. Cajoles," spoke the
Mayor, "what have you to say in
refu!ation Of this charger" "Your
honor, a few days ago l left my
cabin on the banks Of the placid
Guyan, from whose chimney the
blue smoke curls in peace, and
around the hearLhstone Of which to.
day Nancy Jane is sitting and my
coon dogs are sleeping, and turned
my steps to this the boosted Capitol
Of Mason county, Bill Meadows
to repair the flint lock on my old
musket, along the sights of which
| have gazed for thirty years-yes,
sixty left my farm, left the
grand old trees that grow so mag
nificently upon the banks Of my
sweet, my own Guyan, beneath
whose dark outrageous shadows |
have oft times chewed in sweet
contentment, my hill side navy,
and angIed for the sportive salmon
and sluggish cat Igot justa wee
bit too much, and if you will let
mo go, l will shoulder my old gun
aud start homeward at once."-
"Mr. Cajoles, you are an old citizen
Of this county, of the strictest in
tegrity and a warm friend of my
professional brother, John Timms,
and your only fault is a fondness
for the cup that cheers and inebri-
utes, and this being your first ap.
pearanCe before me, l discharge
you with the admonition to go and
sin no more" "Thank you, Mr.
Mayor, 1 anu so grateful to you, and
the next time you go to Lincoln on
old Bet, be sure and stop at old
Cajoles' cabin, and he and his Nan
cy Jane will furnish you the best
Of hog and hominy on the creek,
and the old fiddle will play your
old tunes, Cabin Creek and, Rory
0'Moore,' until you are lulled to
Sleep"
Tho next was a young Dude from
Gallipolis, whose name, upon the
promise of reformation, will not be
given. He was dressed in the
height of fashion,. and from The ap.
pearance Of his "harln he tolls not,
neither does be spin. He loft Gal.
lipolis, he said, on the jim Mont.
gomery a few evenings ago, and
struck for the classic precincts Of
Point Pleasant, and in searching
for the grave of Cornstalk, he be.
came imbued with the spirit of
the great warrior, and calmly fell
asleep within the shadow Of the
court house. When Lijah spoke,
the truth dawned upon his honor
that the Dade had been out with
the boys, had "riz and fell with
them every time'' until he fell once
too often and could not rise any
more. The Mayor spoke to him in
solemn tones Of the evils of intern.
perancp, of tile shocking absurdity
Of being Dude, and of his imam.
Gus conduct in town. He also said
to him that he had come from the
village Of GallipOlis to the busy,
thriving city of Point Pleasant to
make a mash, and to cut high fan.
tastic capors before its citizens,
that would make the ghost Of Eli
nipsico weep. Young man, you
have struck the wrong place, and
lot md sov ~ ,ou v,, L,. a..