The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1883-04-28
MISCELLANEOUS.

You mustn't think all women are purse
proud, simply because they carry their
pocket-books in their hands.
Another lie nailed" as the wag remark
ed. when the merchant stuck up a sign
" At cost"
Gin ruins genius says 4 contemporary.
Yes, but genius ruins a good deal of gin, SO
it's about q stand off.
The best thing about a rainbow is that it
does MT stay out after dark. 1t has not
the absurd habits of the comet.
Out West they call whisky coffin var
nish." There's a chance here for somebody
to work in q little one about dead drunk"
Scientific men have lately discovered that
the crab does not cr'wl backward. 1t is
made that way. 1t is going forward all the
time.
Professor-"If you attempt to squeeze
any solid body it will always resist press
ure." Class smiles and cites examples of
exceptions which prove the rule.
Whv should a man who is in a bad fix be
said to be up a tree?' Lots of men who
have stood in the midst Of a ten-acre lot
with a cross bull approaching have heartily
wished themselves in the br nches of a
lofty vegetable.
One great unpleasantness attending q
mans getting married in his utter ~insignifi-
canoe on the OCCASION. The bride is the
object of attention as the performer of the
show, and he is regarded merely as a ne
cessary property.
perhaps l Invent be so lucky as some
remarked Brown, but for all that. there's
lot of people who would like to stand in my
shoes And no doubt they could all do it,
said Fogg, with a glance at Browns thir-
teens
= 1t Was at the close of the wedding break
fast. One of the guests arose, and with
glass in hand, said-'I drink to the health
of the groom. May he see many days like
this The intention was good but the bride
looked up as if something had displeased
her.
VaIenciennes lace is returning to favor for
evening wear, the new Normandy patterns
being very delicate and tasteful. A novelty
in these designs is a series IF fine shells,
forming the border of a ~flsunce, and another
of Cupid's heads peeping out from clusters of
ferns and rose vines.
SAlAhl GAbNAi AAo AbSShSBASoS0S
and are no longer used for show, but merely
to do service for fastening the dress they
are, however, very pretty when made of
crocheted silk in ball shape. on which a star
or square is wrought, and these are placed in
two rows close together down the front.
A select prize fight took place a night or
two ago in a Bowery cellar, New York city.
Fourteen rounds were fought, and one of
the contestants had his face pounded into a
ieAy. The affair was kept very quiet.
The manager said once let it be known that
a prize fight is to take place, and every
official in the city will insist upon a free pass,
and where's your profit.
One of the most influential Georgia
grangers was experimenting affIirs at his
cotton press the other day, when he was
accosted by a neighbor Il see, Colonel,
that the Tariff Bill has passed" is that
so? How about cotton ties p Still 33
per cent. nd UdE0ren1 :" well, here, you
bows. thar |! sift another shovel O. sand in the
middle of that bale 1 can't afford to reform
until the tariff does ~ and the sitting was
strictly attended to.
A prominent member of 4 sportman's club
died recently In Paris. and his friends order
ed a floral ornament suitably inscribed, to be
sent to the house. When they came to the
funeral they could see nothing of their
flowers until they noticed that the passers-
by were gazing with much establishment at
the funeral cortege of a young girl, just
issuing from the next house, upon whose
coffin Law an enormous wreath, with the in
scription in large letters, : Ever first in the
chase