Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-09

tcther The time O. this picnic the Major is
speakin' Of, though, the Major ruther held the
winnin' hand agin t'other four, 'cordin' to
the way Hammer G. were a lettin' of him
shine 'reun' her. So, when she asst him to
run an urrand fur her over through the
woods about six miles, he claps his gun over
his shoulder an starts The urrand were to
carry basket O provender fur the picnic,
which were to be left at Hubby McGarry's ia
go with her things in their wagon, cause
Hammer G. s folks didn't hav no wagon but a
stun drag an she didn't calc'late to go to no
Fourth O July picnic on stun drag So the
Major starts fur McGarry's with the basket
on one arm an his gun over t'other shoulder;
But mebbe Pm a cuttin' in a little on your
teilin' O. the story, Major" said the Squire,
with another wink at the Sheriff.
''Oh, not durn DIT, b'gosh!" exclaimed the
Old Settler; "only, if he'd the manners ez
some folks is got, an didn't make no more
bones showin' of 'em, wouldn't take it no
ways singular, b'goshtlmightly, if got my
consumed head broke some day Eff I want
my mem'ry logged I'll asst to hev it logged,
but I'll asst some un to jog it fur me ez I know
kin do it straight; an consequently, Squire,
wont bother you to do it, Boys, started
to tell we this story, an Pm gointer tell it eff
it takes all night. The picnic were gointer
to be on the Fourth of July, 1889, an on the
Sd of July | starts with BASKET O victuals to
leave it at McGarry's, who were gointer cart
it an Han to the groun's 'Twan't six mile, an
'twan't three, but 'twere fur 'nough. Fore I
started up an asst Han right out if she'd tie
to me, an she says to me th't she'd gimme my
answer at the picnic, an she gimme to un'er-
stan, bgosh, hit it'd be yes! So l trapsed
through the woods feelin' durn good ]
stopped at spring to get drink when l
were half way to McGarry's, an in dom,
that 1 sot my gun down quite distance from
the spring. Jis' ez I were drinkin' what
should I see a comm through the woods on
a dead run and plump at me but a durn big
bar. 1 couldn't git my gun, but any other
time I'd a jis' buckled in and had a bully ras-
sci with the bar. Thinks says I, I'll be a
durn nice lookin' thing going to picnic all
clawed up by bar, to meet the girl ez is
gointer say yes, and marry mel So made
fur a hole L see in ledge ez laid in back
| thar, an dropped inter it in double quick, an
pulled good sized stick ez lay at the openin'
right across the hole, an had myself barred
| in. The basket were strapped to me. The
bar came sniffin' about, but couldn't git his
nose in, even. [ thought the bar would
| kinder hang roun' fur little while an then
make off, an then I'd come out an mosey on
| to McGarry's."
"Major," said the Squire, "you furgot
| sumpin'. You furgot to speak about that
leetle menagerie O yourn that We had then
| the coon an the fox, an the two bars, the
latter bein' so tame that they'd foller ye all
over, if you'd let EN-"
"That yarn about them two tame bars il
| all consumed lie, b'gosht'lmighty!" ex
claimed the Old Settler, springing to his fee
and swinging his cane. sit were all started
by that consumed Pete Golip, an you know
it! You know durn well that he started tina
story to bust me up with Han, an he did bus
me up, fur she went an married little Peles
Potter, b'gosh, an arter she'd planted hin
give Pete the cut agin an married Sol Gable
Then when Sol were gathered in she throweC
Pete over fur Lige CrimAint, an now, arte
Lige has been called across the river TO
twenty years, an she is nigh onter 6;
if she's day, she's willin' t.
take up with Pete, an he's got no NOR
gizzard than to take up with her. She
toll we she wouldn't marry the bes' man hv
in, did she? IVull, she amt gointer, no
by durn sight She's gointer tie to tn
or'nariest no-account cuss that ever hunted
coon, b'gosht'lmighty!"
And the old settler shook his cane at th
Squire and took his leave with more tina
usual abruptness.
} ''The trouble is with the Major" said til
Squire, as the boys adjourned for refresl
ments, che don't like to hear folks throw u
to him that he was holed up for three days b
his tame bar, which was only follerin' hiI
and waitin' fur him to come out The Majo
had to eat the basket O. vituals an missed th
picnic, an O. course the boys got hold on i
: an wouldn't let up on him. Hammer G. neve
give him yes for an answer, an notice he
, mite tetchy about it yet"