Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1883-06-05
TIVE BlD BOI.

chair with the back gone, and looked
very tired.
30, darn the baby. Everybody
asks me about the baby as though il
was mine. | don't pay no attention
TO the darn thing, except to notice the
foolishness going on around the house.
Say, | guess that baby will grow TO be
a FIRE engine. The nurse coupled the
baby on 10 a section Of rubber hose
that runs down into bottle Of milk,
aud 1t began to get up steam and
pretty soon the milk began to disap.
pear, Just like the water does when a
FIRE engine couples on TO hydrant.
Pa calls the baby old Number Two.
am Number One" and ii pa had a
hook and ladder truck and horse
cart ard fire gong, he would i'm.
agine that he was chief engineer OF
the fire department. But the baby
kicks on this milk wagon milk, and
bowls like a dog that's got lost. The
doctor told pa the best thing he could
do was to get goat, but pa said since
we Initiated him into the Masons with
the goat he wouldn't. have a goat
around no how. The doctor told pa
the other kind Of goat, | think it
was a Samantha goat he said, wouldn't
kick with its head, and pa sent me up
into the Polack settlement to see il !
couldn't borrow milk goat for few
weeks. ! got a woman 10 lend us her
goat till the baby got big enough to
chew beef, for dollar a week, and
paid dollar in advance, and pa went
up in the evening To help me get the
goat. Well, il was the darndesl mis-.
take You ever see. There was two
goats 50 near alike you couldn't tell
which was the goat We leased, and the
other goat was the chum Of our goat,
but 1t belonged to n Nirish woman.
We got bed cord hitched around the
Irish goat, and that goat didn't recog.
nile the lease, and when we tried TO
jerk it along it rared right up. and
made things real quick for pa, l
don't know what there is about goat
that makes it get so spunky, but that
goat seemed to have a grudge against
pa from the first. If there was any
places on pas manly form that the
goat did not explore with its head, pa |
don't know where the places are. .,
il damned him, and when l LATED pa
got mad. | told him every man
ought to furnish his own goats, when
he had baby, and | let 20 Of the
rope and started of, and pa said he
knew how it was, | wanted him 10
get killed. 1t wasn't that, but l saw
The Irish woman that owned the goat
coming around the corner of the house
with a cistern-pole. Just as pa was
getting the goat out Of the gate the
goat got crossways Of the gate, and pa
ranked, and doubled the goat right up
and l thought he had broke the goats
neck; and the woman thought 80 too,
or she jabbed pa with the cistern.pole
ust below the belt, and she tried to
ret a hold on pas hair, but he had
Ter there. No woman can get the
'dvsntvge Of pa that way, for una has
ried il. Well, pa explained ii TO the
woman, and she let pa of if he would
Jay her two dollars for damages TO the
,oat, and he paid it; and then We
ook the nsnny.goat, and it went right
'lOng with us. But | have got my
opinion of baby that will drink
,oat's milk. GOSH 1t is like this
tuil that comes in spoiled cocoanut.
he baby hasn't done anything but
late, since the nurse coupled it on TO
he goat hydrant.
! had 10 take all my playthings out
4 the basement, to keep the goat
rom eating thom. guess the milk
will taste of powder and siDged hair,
low. The goat got TO eating some
roman candles me and my chum'
lad laid away in the coal-bin, and
hewed them around the furnace, aud
he powder leaked out and a coal fell
ut Of the furnace ON the hearth, aud
oud died TO see pa and the hired
,irl and the goat. You see, pa cant
milk nothing but a milk wagon, and
10 got the hired girl to milk the goat;
nd they was just hunting around the
easement for the goat, with tin cup,
when the fireworks went of. Well,
here was balls Of green, and blue,