The semi-weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1882-1886, 1883-12-01
a SERMON.
A Miners Version Of the Story
of the Prodi9al Son.

of the Prodi9al Son.
At one of our evening entertain.
ments, j. L. Dow, M. p. (Victoria)
q s :otchman of excellent humor,
who is returning from a tour in
America, read us a sermon which he
had taken down as he heard it in
Leadville. The service was in q va
riety theatre; some whiskey barrels
made the pulpit. After the singing
of "A Days March Nearer Home,''
q hard-featured miner rose to address
the Manufactured congregation:
Friends, the regular preacher has
gone down to-day among the boys
who are working the new carbonate
mines at Gunnis0n, and I have been
appointed to take his hand and heave
it for all it is worth. To many of
| you present it won't be necessary to
tell you that I'm kinder new to this
business, but I don't believe there's
a rooster in the camp mean enough
to take advantage of my ignorance
and cold.deck me on the first deal.
I have been reading in this yere book
that yarn about the Prodigal Son and
I will try to tell you the story. The
book don't give no dates, but I guess
it happened a considerable spell back
in history. 1t seems the Prod's
father was pretty flush with the
stamps, and q real good sort into the
bargain, as he always shelled out
freely when the kid struck him for
a stake, and never bueked at the size
of the pile neither, so long as the boy
heaved in hearty on the ranch and
generally behaved hisself handsum.
But by and by the kid began to get
restless and wanted to rustic out the
travel; SO he got the ola man to ante
up in advance of the death racket
and let him 60. He no sooner got
his dizzy in his pocket than he shook
the rancho and spread himself out to
take in some of the far-of camps.
Wal, according to the book, he had a
way-up time at first and slung his
coin around as if he owned the beat
paying lead within q thousand miles
Of Denver. But, my friends, this
game didn't last forever. Hard luck
struck him at last, and the Prod is
found in one of his sober intervals
remarking in confidential way to
one of his chumis. II say, old pard,
I'm busted clean down to the bed
rock, and them is the cold blooded
facts" The book don't say what the
Prod went broke on, but prob'ly he
steered up against some brace game.
Be that as it may, however, he was
80 beautifully cleaned out that he
hadn't q two-bit piece left to go and
eat on. In this condition he struck q
rancho belonging to an old granger,
who, taking pity IN the poor, busted
Prod, gave him q job of herding hogs.
The granger wasn't q bad old sample
in a general way, but he was inclined
to be kinder mean on the feed, and
so it came that often the Prod got so
trightfully sbarp-set for a meal he
had to go whacks in the hog-trough.
You bet the kid who in his flush
times had been boozing round among
the best Of everything like a silver
king or a big railway monopolist,
had now plenty of time on his hands
for doing q tall lot Ct thinking, and
one day he said to himself:
"I'll just ding this business. Why,
even the meanest help in my old
governors hired service are living on
square grub, and plenty of it, while
Pm worrying along here on q shook
lunch. I know what I'll do-I'll
Just skip back home to the old man
and ask for a new deal" So away
he went, but he had q hard time
reaching the old ranch and don't you
forget it. When you have plenty of
money, my friends, everybody is
pleasant, but when you're on thebor-
row you don't find it so good. Final
" he did strike the familiar trail
leading to the old home, and while
crossing some old lots the old man,
as the book puts it, saw him q COM
ing afar off. Yes: the old mans eyes
were very dim, but he did not fail to
spot his boy afar of.
And what dye spose that Prod's
father did? Did he whistle the dogs
up to chase him off the ranch? You
bet he didn't. Did he go and get
down his shot gun and wait to get q
good drop on him You bet he
didn't. No, but I'll tell you what he
did. He just waltzed right out of the
gate to meet him, and froze to that
poor scarecrow right on the spot, and
fell to kissing of him and weeping
over him and calling him his poor,
long lost boy until the Prod got broke
up. and like q sluice dam when the
snow comes down off Pixies Peak
under a July SUM-. The old man then
took him right off to q clothing store
and rugged him out in the nobbiest
suit to be had for coin and put an ele-
CANT ring on his finger, ordered the
latest steer on the rancho to be
slaughtered, invited all the neigh
bors in and had thebiggest blowout
that camp had ever seen.
Now it appears that Prod's elder
brother was out at work with the
teams, and when he came in he
asked some of the help what "a the
meaning of the picnic they were hav-
ing inside, and when he was told the
reason he just got real mad. The old
man hearing Of this went out to him
and said: "Come in. lad; your broth
er's come back, and we're having a
regular old-fashioned jubilee; now
YOU come right along. like a good
fellow, and take a share in the break
down." But the brother wouldn't
bulge, and said: "Look here, dad,
I have stuck to the rancho and have
never transgressed your orders, but
it never struck you to have q picnic
of this kind until you give it in honor
of the loafer who has disgraced our
NAME" But, my friends, you make
your bets on it that old man had a
level head, and wasn't to be easily
bluffed. He says: my son, you say
you have never transgressed my Or
ders, but are you quite sure that's so.
1 tell you that you have grievously
transgressed my commandments now
by your unbrotherly and uncharita-
bic behavior. Learn that 1 am not
pleased by service of mere form, If
the heart is not in accord. You may
count that your service is according
to the letter of the law, but l tell you
it don't fill the bushel worth q cent
so far as the spirit is concerned. The
spirit that you are showing, my lad,
is the one that leads to narrow-mlnd-
edness, to bigotry. to intolerance, and
to fooling round and burning folks
because they don't fix up their for
mol ohsorva ncoa inst exactly a. VOL