The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1883-07-11
MIDNIGHT IN A MENAnER,E.
Don't talk so loud" said the watchman !,
you'n wake the oudad."


Don't talk so loud" said the watchman !,
"you'n wake the oudad."
The what ?" said the reporter.
The oudad,' replied the watchman ::
"thats what they call it; he's lovely bird
and hiss voice like buzz saw. And when
lie buzzes, gosh So let him Sleep" and
the watchman silently led the way past the
oudad
Cheese it," broke out tho watchman
again. "Do you hear that S'' An elephant
lad evidently kicked his companion.
AFRO the elephants apt to be very restless
IT night?"
Oh, very. Aud when an elephant is
resting, there's a good deal that's restless
They sleep on one side till that's tired and
then they flop over on the other. That was
y flop over we just hearl.e
WHATS this ?" asked the reporter, poin.
ing to something in the path.
That, replied the watchman, following
mp the obstacle with his lantern, "seems to
be part of o camel. But where's the rest OF
him? oh, hero it is. They stretch out
vol, don't theyG Those are magnificent
bumps made expressly for this circus, too.
They are harmless"
What, the humps ?"
No, tho camels. Aud they make nc
noise at night unless they find shingle nails
IN their food. Then they complain"
Don't get too near the business end Of
that thing" said the Waterman, lifting up
bis lantern so that it was even darker than
before, THAT is mule. Never interfere
with mules plans, and in approaching
him always allow for contraction and sub
sequent expansion of the muscles. Next to
the mule are the zebra-striped ponies We
aever venture to use soap on those stripes.
Here are some very rare things, aud they
are as queer as they are rare. They never
make the slightest noise either when pleased
or when frightened They are the girafres.
No one ever heard a giraffe murmur. OBJ
serve the length of their neck. What win
ter resort for diphtheria, You can get
something of an idea of their length of neck
oy pleturing in your minds eye four yards
of sore throat and the amount of vinegar
md salt required for one gargale The gil
raife is indeed difficult thing to keep: he
dies SO easily and almost without provoea
tion.n
This animal here" continued the watch.
man, still walking by the stalled animals,
F" is not, as you might have supposed, n
Harlem goat. No; this is the sacred bull
II is said he was taken from the Pope
" Is he very sacred ?" asked the incredn-
lous reporter.
8 Yes; he's extremely sacred. He gets
more sacred every day. The amount OF
reverence he inspires in his keepers is only
equaled by that of the MULE
Having reached the end of the stalled mi.
mails the Waterman announced, by \ twist
of his lantern, that he was about To come
upon the ferocious wild beast in cages. He
then put out the lantern, aud he and the re.
porter sat down on the railing that protects
tho Gagged animals from tho spectators Il
was little carly for the usual midnight roa,
of the animals but not half SO early as til,
visitors had thought, for soon there cam,
frana the ~@ea healr of them u noise tina
startled both or Thorn ~.t IL =. wouh.
growth. 1t was the greeting Of an African
lion
1t only required the roar of ono lion will
good lungs to start the whole menagerie
That beautiful bird called the emu was til,
first to reply to the lions call. The repl,
was nothing more than mild form o.
sneeze, but it went q great way. And il
less time than 1t takes to record it the con
gregation of animals that were endowed
with any sort of an apparatus for making
racked had tuned their pipes and were blow
ing and believing to sec which could raak,
the most noise. 1t was lively place to b,
in without any light. But that did not seen
to make any difference to the animals. III,
baboon barked and the rhinoceros erunted
And the louder they barked and grunted th,
louder tho lions and tigers roared. Ther
he elephants joined in the general disorder
and when they united in the chorus Their
vas no peace for the wicked. Ono elephan
is usually considered sufficient to supply on
family with NIL the noise il wants but whei
twenty elephants lift up their voices in on
| synip1thetic lanentuian, nothing but th,
deepest coal mine could ever furnish saf,
harbor or II sure retreat Add TO this th.
hair-sptting noises of the cockatoos ant
The macaws, the mournful lowing of th,
Nubinn rhinoceros ard tho unparalleled
snore of the hippopotamns, and the affect Il
appalling The Waterman looked at tho re-
porter and the reporter eyed the Waterman
Neither could speak. Aud it would not
have made any difference il they had
spoken. They might have roared until they
were black in the face md still not have
made themselves hoard Each grasped the
others hand and bolted for the entrance
With as much haste as though pursued by
the whole menagerie. -Nee Yorh 7yiJuns