The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1883-04-20
HrTTIcIsMS.

The cremationists maintain that the
human race should end in a dead heat
Smallpox seems spreading. The last
news from Mount Etna speaks Of it
suffering from an eruption. Why not
vaccinate it?
There is one good thing about the
mercury in a thermometer. No mat
ter how fast or far it descerds, it never
fall with "a sickening thud."
The latest thing in noses is to the
effect that the stingiest man in Arkan-
sas talks through his nose to save the
wear and tear on his IS set Of false
teeth.
They talk about a girl in San Fran
cisco who is so thin that when her beau
tries to hug her he has to wrap towel
around her so as to have something to
squeeze against.
The cork is the article that often gets
into a tight place.-Ex. So does the
fellow who takes what is under it after
he loOsens it-especially if his friends
take him to an inebriate asylum.
1t is claimed that the seventh son Of
aseventh son possesses marvellous gifts
of healing, but a race of scoffers are
prone TO believe that all he can heels
an old stocking.-Philadelphia Chron-
icle.
The man who called his his dog Pen
/, ny. because it was sent to him, and his
tom-cat Misery, becaused it loved COM
pany, is the man who named his dom
key Fact. because facts are stubborn
thinks.
A local liar living in Florida says
that ducks are SO plentiful in the
streams of that state that they have to
be showed aside in order that boats
may pass. Shades of the immortal
truth-teller. whose birthday has just
been celebrated, what are we coming
to?
Politics are certainly red hot down in
Texas. If an editor writes a favorable
notice of Il candidate he is sure to be
awakened in the middle of the night by
a brass band. II he writes an unfavur-
BILE notice he Will be awakened by a
double-barrelled shotgun. In either
case he is bound to awakened. Some
people prefer the shotgun.
A foreign clergyman has lateE been
~lecturing IN Chicago about Emong
the Lapps." AS he does not mention
particularly in his discourse in whose
laps he has been Willing the merry
hours away, we a only kick ourselves
at the thought that these ministers
seem to have been having all the fur
this winter, and the newspaper men
The hard work.
A schoolmistress of Yreka, Califor
mia, while on her way to school, was
attacked by an Infatuated steer. "Sht
seized the animal by the horns anC
held him until help came" The mex
day she saw a rat in the school room
when she hastily gathered her skirt.
about her, jumped upon a desk ant
yelled murder. A rat has no HON.
for a woman to grab hold of.
A Chicago editor who publishes
journal in the interests of mining, ex
presses his opinion that mining, will
the great enduring wealth of the ma
lions of the future hidden in her bosom
stands silent like a mighty power, Will,
the shadow of the wings of a pollntinI
gultnre crosses the sunshine of a glor,
that stretches Gro a continent" A
more unbiased and disinterested tribut,
to a great industry has seldom beer
paid.
isn't it about time for the local au
fhorities to sell the mule used to draw
the town hearse and buy a horse?" ask
the editor Of a Tennessee paper. Twice
lately he has baked and detained pro
c~essions on bitter cold days for over al
hohr. and only last week he kicked il
the front of the vehicle and %seriousl,
damage the corpse. People are begin
ming to get enough of this sort of thing
and if the authorities don't take prope
actions a citizens meeting Will be call
ed"
Two Commercial tourists" of th,
pine board persuasion met in the Uniol
Depot the other day. Hello! Charley,
says No. /, 81 haven't seen you in al
age. What are you doing now?" "Oh
I'm in the same old line" Responded
No. 2. with the same house?" "Yes
same old concern. but situated a lttl,
differently" "How is thar" swell
I've got an interest" as that SOP
How long sinceP' "Since the first o
the month" Let me congratulate,
you" ayes, the old man told me II
got to take an interest in the business
this year or quit. So l took an interest
Kosiusko Murphy has been payinI
his addresses to Miss Esmeralda Long
coffin, one of the bellies of Austin, al
though she told him long ago that sh,
could never be more than q sister t,
X.aitoLo hoo hirtod Ill -