Mexico weekly ledger., 1883-03-15

Pcckss Bod Bsyss Pas Naryelous
Escape.
SCOT any sasaline. - said the bad
boy to the groceryman, as he went in
the store one cold morning, leaving
the store door open, and picked up a
cigar stub that had been thrown down
by the stove, and began 10 smoke it.
.sShut that door, DUN you. Was
you brought up in q saw mill? You'll
freeze every potato in the house. No
/ haven't got vasaline. What do you
want of vasaline r. said the grocery
man, as he set the syrup keg on a keg
by the stove where it would thaw out.
/ ''Want to rub it on pas legs" said
the boy, - be tried to draw smoke
through cigar stub.
s'Why, what's the matter with your
pas legs? Rheumatlzs"
'sWuss nor rheumatic" said the
boy, as be threw away the cigar stub
and drew some cider in broken tea
cup. Spa has the worst hind leg you
ever saw. You see, since there has
been so many fires pa has got offal
scared, and he has bought three fire
escapes, made out of ropes with knots
in them, and he has been telling us
every day how he could rescue the
whole family in case Of FIRE. He told
US to be cool, whatever happened,
and to rely On him. II the house got
on fire we we're all to rush to pa. and
he would save us. Well, last night
ma had to 60 to one Of the neighbors,
and we didn't sleep much, cause ma
had to come home twice in the night
for medicine. Pa was cross at being
kept awake, and told ma he hoped
she would take in her sign and quit
the business. Well, pa he got asleep,
and slept till eight in the morning,
and the blinds were closed, and it.
was dark in his room, and I waited
for my breakfast till I was hungry as
a wolf, and the girl told me to wake
pa up, SO went mp stairs, and /
don't know what made me think Of
it, but I had some of this powder
they make red fire with in the theatre,
that me and my chum had the Fourth
Of July, and I put it in q wash dish
in the bath room, and I touched it of
and hollered fire. / was going to
wake pa up and then tell him it was
all right and laugh at him. l guess
there was too much fire or l yelled
too loud, cause pa jumped out Of
bed and grabbed rope and rushed
through the hall towards the back
window, that goes out on shed.
I tried to say something, but pa run
over me and told me to save myself,
and / got to the back window to
tell him there was no fire just
as he let himself out of the window.
He had one end of the rope tied to
the leg Of the wash stand, and be was
climbing down the back side of the
shed by the kitchen. He was the
horriblest looking object ever was,
with his legs flying and trying to stick
his toe nails into the rope and the
side of the house. I didn't blame
the hired girls for being scared wher
they saw pa and his legs come dowr
outside the window, and when they
yelled went down to the kitchen
and they said a crazy man with pill
low case around his neck was tryinf
I to kick the window in, and they ruI
into the parlor, and / opened the doc
and let pa In the kitchen. He asket
me if anybody else was saved, ant
then told him there was no fire, ant
he must have dreamed he was in
or somewhere. Well, pa was aston
jished. and said he must be wrong i
the head, and I left him thawing him
lself by the stove while 1 went afte
ibis pants, and his legs we're badl
chilled, but I guess he amt froz
much. He lays it all on to ma, an
says if she would stay at home an
/ let people tend to their own affair."
{ there would be more comfort i'm tt
E house. Ma came in with shawl ovt
} her head, and after she heard the fiji
9 story, she sent me after vasaline
rub pas legs. Pa says that he hi
T demonstrated that if q man is co
!, and collected, in case of fire, and go
: deliberately at work to save himsel
4 he will come out all right"
8 "Well, you are the meanest boy
t ever heard Of" said the groceryma
4 s'But what about your pas dancil
e a clog dance in church Sunday. Il
:, minister's bird girl was in here aft
t some Goldfish yesterday morning, al
II she said the minister said your pa h
scandalized the church in the VOL
way
!. ssOh, he didn't dance in chure
g He was little excited, that's a
. You see. pa chews tobacco, and it
n pretty hard on him to sit all throu
% the sermon without taking a che
,r and he gets nervous. He alws
,s reaches around IN his pistol pock
h when they stand up to sing the i
70 time, and feels in his tobacco box a
i gets chew, and pnts II in his mot
% when the minister pronounces
ts benediction, and then when they {
ia out doors he is ali ready TO spit.