New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-02-28
Somebody to Knock Down.

60m6Dody 70 kn00KU0Wn.
The rage for the art defensive has
taken possession Of q number Of young
men in this city, and one Of its worst
victims is q young man employed in the
Office Of . certain mining company. He
bought a pair Of boxing gloves and
practiced on the Office boy and telegraph
messenger boys with such success that
be felt certain he had mastered the
manly art, and began to express him
self as wondering how much Sullivan
would give him to stand up to him
eight or ten rounds. So confident was
he that he could knock OUT any man
Of his inches. and So persistent was he
in obtruding invitations to sparring
bout on every small boy that entered
the Office, that his fellow clerks deter
mined to put up q little job on him, a
professional bruiser-known as ono Of
the best light weights il the country
was interviewed and the arrangements
perfected.
In order to make the thing work
smoothly, It was necessary to have a
sacrifice, and one Of the would-be box
er's fellow clerks-a young man Of about
his own size and age, whom he had FREE
quently knocked about with the gloves
consented to assume the somewhat
disagreeable role. At the time appoint
ed the professional appeared at the Of
fee and inquired for the secretary.
..Not in; anything l can do for you?''
asked the boxer.
The professional had his neck swathed
In handkerchief, spoke with great eff
fort, as if suffering from a severe cold,
and looked SO meek and innocent gem
orally that he was about the last man q
novice would have taken for prize
fighter.
q NO." he said, in answer to the ques-
ton, II jest come down from Virginny,
and I've got letter to Mr..
and il he won't be long, I guess I'll
wait
s ''Oh, he'll be in in a few moments.
Sit down and make yourself at home. !"
In few moments the secretary re-
turned and was soon followed by a
select few who had been invited, who
dropped in to chat for half an hour, it
being after business hours. OF course
the conversation was soon tuyned on
the subject Of boxing, and the boxer inn
mediately brought out his gloves and
challenged any man in the room to q
bout.
Keep quiet about your boxing said
the secretary. There's that little fell
low over there, only a Comstock miner,
and suppose he never had the gloves
on in his life, and I'd gamble that he
C0,,11 rrof axuav with u0,, -
HE could, could hep Here, young
fellow, just take these gloves, and put
up your props"
mo. said the professional; ..I'm
afraid Of you, but I'll tackle that other
young fellow" pointing to the gentle
man who had been selected as the sacri-
fee.
II don't care If I do 90 you round,"
said the sacrifice, and at it they went.
and the professional went to the floor
every round, and allowed himself to be
knocked around like foot ball; but oc-
casionally hewould get in an apparently
accidental sidewiper on the ribs that
would make the sacrifice snort like a
porpoise and wish he had not accepted
the job of being a sacrifice. The round
being finished, the professional dropped
into q chair apparently completely ex-
hausted' coughing as i IN the last stages
of consumption, and declared that the
doctor up at virginia City had pro,
nounc &c AZ MS a, ~, desperate case o.
pneumonia. Inc Would-b u boxer, how y
ever had no compunctlons bout knock,
ing out 9 dying man. All ne wanted want =
was SOMEBODY 20 Knock out; SO ne s. salo
10 the PROFESSIONAL profess Dung 1elleA
when you get your wind, vi go you
some myself 7s
Jn; I'm AFRAID you 9 make 9 corpse
o. me, was the reply.
I'm. come on, sara sne boxer, :!
,,ats ~ n "sv' the nrnfassn 1n 1e 81
and tha hor;nu rprocaadad Evarv It'll, l;tt1.
whila thaS nroftsssionnl wonld send q =
the horcr,s r;bs ! = hack;no h,ow u h;ch j,
- the inaxnerienced eve and to the hoy
81 himself. was the result 81 sheer ,awk
vardness The .boxer confined II;
snarr;no =, attamrts q hi 10 : = !. 5, !,
;at,a f.ce and 10 ,yo : aa..a ;aaan,y -
l-inwad ~ aat II !. - S;rL. = n.s ~, :.
- e;va hin, onn t;aanaa. e.. .I = Z, JIs
~. wv -, v 1l'. WIZ =