Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1883-08-16
HERE And THERE.

hrounu LIS uup, why NOT apDreVlhte
this to "Spokes f"-Boston Commercial
Bulletin.
Trunks must now be marked all over
with European steamer tags, &c., and
American tag manufacturers are doing q
brisk business.
Tho recent tornadoes in Missouri and
adjoining states led Mr.. Stubborns to
make the remark that "Missouri loyss
company. "-1filton NeDs.
Paper rowing boats were not the first
aquatic craft that were constructed of
that material. Paper cutters we're made
years and years ago-PAiladelphia Bulletin.
When man drops dollar out Of his
pocket he doesn't make much of time
but when he loses collar button worth
five cents he goes on like a madman.-
Puck.
Scotch minister: "John, John, I'm
afraid you are on the broad road.'' In
ebriated parishioner "Weel, minister,
as far as I'm concerned, the breadth is a.
required"
The Globe thinks the tanned skin will |
re-elect the governor. As we look at 1t,
If he gets in again this fall. it will not be
BY the tanned skin, but by the skin of his
teeth.-Boston Transcript.
A "good puff Of an uncommon kind
was given few days ago by the Fargo,
Dakota, argus. 1t said: "0hmer & Viii. |
sons hearse presented a very attractive |
appearance at the funeral OF Mrs.
on Friday last"
$50 to hotel where they have college |
students for walters 2'' said he. "Not |
much I've lived for four years in
town whore they have college, and I'd
rather be waited on by drunken prize
fighter Boston Post
Rosa Bonhsur could draw cattle as
natural as life, and Jesse James could
draw blood that couldn't be distinguished
from the genuine article. Both were de.
sirous OF getting on the right side of the
hanging committee Harvard Ldmpoon.
The quantity of beer produced in the
United States last year averaged more
| than IA gallons for every inhabitant of
the country. Somebody has played
wretohed mean trick on us then.-B.r.
lington Free Re,s.
They thought they heard burglars in
the house last week and in going down
stairs to investigate, Bibbs said to his
wife: "You go first it's mean man
that would shoot woman
| "Roastbeeitl mbmuttonandham," said
the girl who waits on table" at the Isle
of Shoals. "Well," said the old gentle
man, 1--WE never tasted it, but you may
bring me some and I'll see what it's
like"
All the same the year round "No,"
said Mrs. Mcdill, "we don't celebrate All
FOOLS Day at our house. The Squire
never pays any attention to legal holt
days aud IS for me, feel just as foolish
one day as another"
The Irish court of appeal decides that
the family jewelry belongs to the wife.
Somehow this decision doesn't seem to
excite us very much, and it doesn't elate
mrs. All-Sorts to any great extent
Boston Post, all Sorts.
"Yes," said the Vermont deacon, 81
always go down to camp meeting, and
always come back feeling good. Do you
see that magnificent horse there in the
feldf Well, you ought to have seen the
old plug l took down there. ''-Ihitadei
phia Neys.
'My case is just here" said a citizen
to lawyer. "The plaintiff will swear
that | hit him. l will awear that did
not. Now what can You lawyers make
out OF that if we go to trial 2'' ga hun
dred dollars easy" was the reply.
Young man, win fame as a Statesman
or soldier, and after you die your portrait
, will be put on postage stamp. Win
fame as poet and some philahthropist
| will give you big funeral 40 or so years
after your first modest burial in $l5
coffin.
Is "alleged wife poisoner'' correct p
Student. Yes. 1t means man who is
charged with poisoning his wife or a
man who actually poisoned his alleged
wife. The expression is certainly correct,
but, as you write it,not very perspiouous.
Philadelphia Ne,os.
/, 1t is said that John L. Sullivan has
been spoken Of in Boston as the proper
. man to be appointed to the position Of
! street commissioner, and a correspondent,
having heard the report, writes to say
that he thinks the redoubtable John
, would make better pound MASTER
, Puck.
: First Britisher at Boulogne (shady look
ing party, evidently resident, to casual
acquaintance): "Oh, | don't care to &c
. back to my native country. They all
4 seemed to be against me Second
4 Br fisher respectable tourist): 5000
/ gracious What the whole II Of 'em 2''
o When John helped Nan take in the clothes,
And put them in the basket,
She thought he'd kiss her. hut poor John
Was waiting For Nantasket;
O SO when they went up to the well,
4 And John had filed the bucket,
- she slyly came behind hIlrl-and-
Wen, then, of course, Ma ltucket
n -SOnierritte JDuT7ldi.
n In Boston horse car, as the conductor
!, approached young passenger, the little
Il fellow was seen to turn first pale and ther
n red, and when the official held out his
. hand for the fare, the young sufferer
o gasped out: "Will you please charge il
d to my father, Mr.. A. l.; I've swal
y lowed the money %
l. A man was seen at type founders the
!, other day buying bushel of bracket.
J. and parentheses and the same amount
9 italic type. 1t is suspected that he wa.
o going to start comic weekly in London
where every original joke printed nust
i be propped IN with brackets and paren
/ theses, and explained with talics.-.Nor
a ristoUn Herald.
There is a man up in Vermont who's,
l. | binihoi duVuiuiuB W UH6 Ol Ib5 menltA
h JOURNEYS, have dried mp, so that they
"a rattle around like beans in bladder
a every time he shakes his head. This Ii
splendid effect. Hundreds of men are
=, going about unable to show that they
II have any brains. If they had something
4 to rattle they would be we'll fxed-Neu
. Orleans R.cayune.
"dood morning, John," said one of the
y leading Presbyterian pastors in Scranton,
q Pa, to young friend whom he met on
4 the street the first warm day of the sea.
II sen, Show does the old man stand the
J; heat 7" The young man made no reply,
u but went his way with a clouded brow
And when the good pastor learned that
# the young mans father had died only a
;. week before, he understood why his cor.
q dial greeting was met so coldly.
Il Two boys stood in front OF the " Iorio
y office one day during the week. The sub
4 ject OF their conversation was lies. "a
- don't believe there's ennybody in the
. world that never told lie" said one.
"Pll bet 10 cents know newsboy wha,
:, never lied" Glow old is he ?" "Hs's
as old as u.s." "I'll bet yer" The
, money was put up, and the frat speaker
y placed the pools in his pocket, remarkine:
- sits Mickey Notary. He's deaf m
\ dumb, m wuz born that way"
Mr.. lsaacs keeps a clothing store, in
:, front of which he liz generally to be found
i. pouring forth an eloquent disqnisition on
a the merits Of his stock. Yesterday,
I rrl.s L.