Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1883-11-09
FUN


AN UNEXPECTED STRIKE.-As an H.
lustration of the tendency of things at the
present day the following, says an ex-
change. will be appreciated by our readers:
A teacher. fin1ing it f1icult to Obtain
the prompt attendance of the boys in hes
class. resolved to adopt plan which sht
felt sure would be successful. She said to
the boys:
Now will give bright penny to each
one who will be in their places every Sun-
day.
Z This plan seemed to work well. One
Sunday not boy appeared in his place.
The teacher was surprised and somewhat
discouraged that her plan had not succeed
ed. But the next day, while walking dow
the street and thinking what to do next.
she met one Of the boys and said to him:
swell, Johnny. where were you yester
day 2p
''At home, num-"
'.But why did you and the other boy
not come to Sunday school and get you
pennies s''
'Oh, teacher, cause we've struck; W.
won't come for less than two cents now"
We were notiinformed as to how loi.
the strikers held out, or whether the ad-
vance was granted.
You should learn some trade, my son,"
said an Austin gentleman to his youn
hopeful. ''Bricklayers are getting $3.50
day, while lawyers can't afford to ride o.
the street cars" PA. why didn't YOU
learn trade when you were boy ?"
That's not only silly, but also au imprr
tinent question. I didn't learn trad.
when was a boy out of regard for YOU
feelings. wanted to give you an opp"I
tunity to say your father was gentle
man." ut can't be helped now.' replie
the boy modify; "but wish you had con
suited me, fer if we had arranged for yo'
to be the bricklayer,I could be the gentle
man myself. Texas Settings.
A young tenor obtained hearing before
director of one of the provincial theaters
He sang, but the manager stopped him
the end of three or four notes. "Vei.
WE'LL" he said, ''leave me- your address.
aud / will think of you if it should hap
PEN "What do you mean by if
should happen ?" interrupted the yours
tenor. why, if ny theater shoulf
burn "Well!" II should engage 70,
to cry fre.''
~ GU are charged with carrying whiske,
away from an Illicit distillery," said th'
Unite States Judge to Uncle Silas. "Wha;
Lave you to say to that chargt?" Il ism
guilty, sab. didn' carry it away. "'Yrs
had some, then?" "Ye s, sab, had some.'
w hat did you do with it," "Well. s,l
ali dat 1 had was inside of me, an had :.
much dat couldn't carry it away, 50 j..
stay dar. '-Arkdnsaao Traveller.
In family where the best of harmony
does not prevail. the couple try all the sam,
TO make the outside world believe that al
is lovely therein. my husband and l,
simpered the lady, the other day, ''intend
to have ourselves painted together for til,
next salon. BY battle palnter?" sneer-
ingiy asked one of her friends, who Wa,
acquainted with tie affairs of the happy
family.--Paris paper.
Out in Illinois they hadn't heard of tn.
Java earthquake till lightnlng-rod man
came along and told of 1t. Then they saio
they could stand good deal of lying iron
one of his profession, but the idea thai
they d believe that whole ranges of noun
tains had become hole in the grounf
was an insult to them, n so they tarred
and feathered Tim and ran him out of tbt
region.
A health jonrnal advises, "Do not H.
on the left side." T Is is very propt'
admoni ion. If you a. 9 OBJ iged to lie, b
careful and lie on the right SIDE. You viii
find It PAYS in the end.