davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
The Penitent Parrot.

My personal interest in our ships
menagerie was from the first fixed on
the parrot, for had reason to hope and
suspect that on this line would discov-
the penitent Parrot. When Twas spok-
en- to by this parrot while passing
turned and closely inspected its face.
/ winked. There was something in its
mere wink so pious and something so
unctuOus in its voice that I feel con-
tirmed in my suspicion that this is the
Penitent Parrot.
For fear some readers may not have
heard of this remarkable bird 1 will
mention that it once mingled with
speech attractive to the young pro-
family shocking to their mammas.
Without being in the least ANNOYED by
anyone, and while seemingly looking
out in dreamy mood over the deep
blue sea, this bird would suddenly
break out with a volley of marin
er's patois and oaths enough to turn
the air purple around it. At length,
when it was heard that some ladies had
declared they would never again sail
on ship with such a bird, it was re-
solved that the parrot must be cured of
its bad habits. And it was. Its oaths
were invariably followed by 6acking.
A large bucket of salt water was empti-
ed on the poor birds head, each splash
accompanied with the remark: you've
been swearing Polly was thorough
~ cured by this. Once when the boat
shipped q heavy sea which gave the
reformed parrot severe ducking, the
bird, conscious of its own innocence,
descended from its perch and repaired
to the place of poultry; there it walked
up and down before the deluged fowls,
saying to them: You've been swear
ing! You've been swearing!'' Moncurs
D. C0nscay, in San francisco Chronicle.
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
Continued, from last tOeek.)
How Watch Cases are Made.


It is fact not generally known that the
James Boss Gold Watch Gases really con-
tain more pure gold than many "solid"
gold cases The demand for these watch
cases has led to the manufacture of a very
poor grade of solid gold watch cases
low in quality, and deficient in quantity.
These cases are made from to 10 karats,
and a 5 or 6 karat case is often sold for II
or II ka:,,s. 1t is NOT economy to buy
watch case SO poor i'll quality that it will
soon lose it's color, or one SO soft that it will
ose its shape and fail to shut tight, thus
letting i'll d.st and damaging the works, or
one SO thin that slight blow will break
she crystal, and perhaps the movement.
1t IS economy to bay a James Boss Gold
Watch Cttse, III whicl, HoHE Of t!:c::c things
ever occur. This watch ,.sc is 'oi Gl crperi-
mcat-it has been n,ai., nearly thirty gears.
HiZLErn:;. PA. Oct. q, 1892
sold two James Boss tiu H;.tc., Gases thirty
years ago, WLCn tilcy frat out aud they in
good condition yet One of tileln is carried by
carpenter Mr.. L. ". Drake, Of Eaz!ctor, and only
shows the wear in one or two lHc2a; The other by
Mr.. Bowman. of Cunningham. Pa; and l can pro-
duce or both Of these at any time
SYLVESTER EEGLE, Je,celer.
Send cent stamp keystone Watch Case Factories, Phs.
depha. Pa, for handsome Illustrated Pamphlet showing how
Jane. Boss and keystone Watch Gases made.
(I0 be Continued.)
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
A LAWYER With a Heart.

''Have you ever been in prison?''
asked badgering lawyer of a modest
witness whom he was trying to bully.
The witness did not answer
''Come, now, speak up; no conceal
mcnt. Have you ever been to prison,
sir?''
eyes, sir; once,' answered the wit
ness, looking modestly down to the
floor.
Eyes, 1 thought so. Now when?
When @ were you in prison sir?'
"Where, sir?''
The witness hesitated.
"Come, own up now; no dodging,"'
said the lawyer. ''Now, where were
you in prison, sir?'
''In-in-in-''
'Don't stammer, sir! Out with it!
Where was it?''
Chin Andersonville, SIR"
There was q moments painful pause.
Then the lawyer, who was an old
soldier, put his hand on his forehead as
If pistol shot had struck him, while
the tears came into hi, eyes. Then
jumping forward, he claspei his arms
around the witness neck, and exclaimed:
''My God! was there mysclf!'
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
Marriage Becoming Popular.

The British House of Lords at its
last session rejected bill permitting a
widower to marry his dead wife's
sister. This subject comes up every
year, and while it passes the Commons
by large majorities, it is annually de-
feated by small majorities by the
Lords, temporal and spiritual. The
debate on the motion brought out some
curious statistics. 1t seems that mar
riage is once more a popular institu-
ton in Great Britain. Twenty five
years ago the middle-class Englishman
was reluctant to marry. One of the
popular songs of that day was, ''Why
don't the men propose, mammal" But
now marrying is again in order, but the
old conditions of conjugal life are very
greatly changed. There is more free
dom in marriage. The wife as we'll as
the husband is more her own master.
The former is no longer the mere echo
of her consort, while the latter resents
being tied to the apron strings of his
wife
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28

him up, and walked him around, and
at last saved his life, although they de-.
clared he had all the symptoms Of
pynmia, strychnine poisoning, normal
temperature, Asiatic cholera; morphine
poisoning, rapid pulse, and terrific res
piration, and several other awful
things. However, an analysis of the
cake showed that it contained no sub
stances absolutely poisonous in them
selves, but having been made by the
bride, to the best of her ability and ex-
perience. the cake was enough to kill
. river and harbOr bill. The man was
very young or he would have known
better, and would have ssayea the Gak6
ED hill IaranInlls with
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
The Liberty Of the Press.

ave haven't any further need of
your services y said the managing edi-
tor of a city daily to a reporter who
had been at work only q week.
''That's rather sudden, isn't it?'' re-
piled the startled reporter. Haven't
l done all had to- do?''
''You have done the work, but not
properly, sir
''What' wrong?"
''Well, you wrote up Mrs. Parvenue's $
ball, and there was not word about
it being a brilliant affair."
''That's just what it wasn't
''The lady, sir, takes several copies
of this paper, and her husband has his
printing done in our office, and ordi-
nary common sense should teach you
to understand your duties under the
circumstances"
ssBut-"
''No excuse is necessary, sir. Then
you brought in an article on the arrest
of young Mr.. Fresh for drunkenness.
His father is one of our patrons, and
we have sufficient independence to dis
regard the wishes of the curious public
to get an item of news when our pat
rons are interested in its suppression. :"
II understand
''No you don't, for you wrote Mr..
Jones' obituary without saying he was
q distinguished citizen of large intlu-
ence and man of great goodness of
heart
Il thought he was another kind of
.'You mustn't think. The indie
pendent spirit Of the press is not to be
governed by reportorial thought, sir.
Did you think when you wrote of Miss
Angeline Shoddy departure to the sea-
side without referring to her as the
charming and accomplished daughter
of one of our most select families?'
''WhO said she was the e-"
''Do you have to hear what other
people say in order to know your busi-
ness? Who told you that Mr.. Bottle,
the councilman, was rough? Don't
you know his influence is worth money
to this paper?'
II wasn't aware that t-''
''Of course you were not aware of
anything! If you were, you might be
useful to us. No, sir; you are not the
kind of man we need. We want a
man not to know what he knows, and
know what he does not know. The
liberty of the press is not to be triAed
with by irresponsible reporters who
think, nor is its freedom to berestricted
by young men who let the actual facts
in a case interfere with the require
ments of the occasion. You can get
your pay, sir, by calling at the office, y
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
LIVE AGENTS WANTED.

To sell DR.. Chase's Recipes; or information fer
everybody, in every county in the United States
and Canada. Enlarged by the publisher to 64S
ages. It contains over 1000 household recipes
ETY.. wonderful book and Il household necessi
ty. 1t sells at sight. Greatest inducements ever
offered to book ageIts. Sample cop pies sent by
given. Agents more than double their money
Address Or. Chase Steam Printing House, Aim
Arbor, Michigan. Dec. I2 81
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28

THE GREAT GERMAN
r EN- EDY
FOR pain.
Relieves and cures
RHEUMATISM,
Neuralgia,
Sciatica, lumbago,
BACKACHE,
HEADACHE, T00TBACHk,
SORE THROAT,
QUINgY, gWEIL1N4&
8PRAINS,
sbrAnesk, cuts, Bruises,
HR8gHR9RHs.
UVHNUs DCAND0S
And all other bodily ache
and patns.
FIFTY CENTS 4 BOTTLE.
Sold by all Druggists and
Dealers. Directions In II
languages.
The Charles 4. voeeier Go.
(Svseessors to A. VO0IL1R B co.,
Baltimore, Ad., =. & =
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28

The city council of Sacramento has
formally given the Chinese Of that town
permission to drive the devil out. AS
this ceremony calls for fire works and
frccrackers, the authorities had to be
consulted.
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28

DO xou Want>
oTHE HOME, HOW TO MAKE AND KEEP
best book. It d . work that every wife,
every mother and every housskssper ought TO
have E4eetical common sense, useful every day,
T0ucGlD 1XPDRIlNCB
&onAN. Beautifully bound and at-
tractive. Prices cloth, gold and silver sides,
style, tinted paper, spfinklsd edge, @236; gilt
edge 3275. Specimen pages free 10 any ID
dress. soldonly by subscription Agents want
| : ::
& sPE6iAI isis OFFER EXT FcR tSB 30 pAYs-Anysub-
who yearly subscribers 'sThe House
keeper" ct 50 cents each, or y trial sub.crbets
at p cents each, or 2yea subscribers 81 each,
we will send . copy Of 'Ihe Home" postpaid.
BY mail This Offer is good only 50 days from the
date of this paper after which time 'The Home"
can be had only through authorized agents.
Tho offer ismade to introduce copy two Of
the book in each neighborhood. Each copy will
|egoatea demand for hundreds
BUCKEYE PUBLI9LHING CO., =
Minneapolis MINI. =
New Ulm weekly review., 1883-11-28
PAT e N rs


Obtained, and all other business in the
U. s. Patent Office attended to for
MODERATE FEES,
Our Office is opposite the U. S. Pat.
ent, office and we can obtain patents
in less time than those remote from
SHINGTON,
Send MODEL OR ORA WING.s We
advise as to pateLtability free of
charge; and we make No Charge IN.
less 1Ue obtain Patent.
We refer, here, to the Postmaster,
the Supt. of money order Div, and
to officials of the U. S. Patent Office.
For circular advice, terms and refer
ences to actual clients in your own
State or county. write to
G.. A. Snow & Co.,
Oppo- Patent Office, Washington, DC.
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09

no longer Nerved to desperation, he re-
paired to her residence on Maple avenue.
The young lady's parents were absent, and
Freeland congratulated himself on the pros
pect OF obtaining an easy victory. He had
come to reclaim the teeth.
Julia sat at an open window looking out
unon the lawn. As young Freeland walked
brlskly up the walk she smiled upon him
with bewitching sweetness. 1t was the same
old smile. Regardless OF all rules Of eti-
quette, he bounded upon tine piazza In
another moment lie had reached her side
and seized her roughly. Julia screamed in
alright, but the young man was not to be
thwarted
Those teeth are mlne," he shreked. 81
want them"
They are certainly mine, responded she;
''you gave them to me-"
Without further parleying the dignted
gentleman of leisure thrust his hand into
her mouth and attempted to extract the en-
tire set. His latest gift was within his grasp
but he could not withdraw his hand. The
teeth had become embedded i'm his fingers
His grOans and grimaces availed nothing
For some moments he was held as III vice,
and executed nOndescript dance. Finally
she released him, and, without waiting to
regain his hat, he disappeared.
His fingers are said to be seve.s1lv injured
ana the physician who dressed the crfrpIcd
Giig;;ts SAYS that it will be some time before
his patient will recover the Use Of his hand.
Last night Freeland was reported as saving
that he would have those teeth at any cost,
even though he had to invoke the aid of the
courts. But what disposition he can make
OF them can not be learned. The occurrence
has caused a general laugh. Both parties
are highly connected.
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09

Noblesve Republican Ledger.
The very fact that American parents are
the most indulgent of all parents, in their al
lowance of spending money and the license
given to their children to come and go and
spend their money pretty much as they
choose, without accounting for it as they
should be required to do, IS a special argu-
ment, almost peculiar to this country, in
favor OF making the schools, to which many
parents delegate the greatest part, if not all,
of the education of their children, means
of instructing them in the objects of money
and the proper manner of keeping 1t, using
it and accounting for it. Parents should do
this, but seeing that it is so universally neg
lected, is the very reason why it should be
sons OF life taught in our public schools.
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
BITTEN BY A swEETHEART.
A Virginia Gentleman's Fingers Crippled in
Ladys Mouth

Richmond (Va.) Special to New York journal.
James Freeland a young gentleman of
leisure, residing in Accomac, in this State, is
suffering from broken heart. This is not
the least of his misery, because badly bitten
hand is a constant reminder of Miss Julia
Trainers pearly teeth.
Mr.. Freeland, who is a tall, dignified young
gentleman, with blonde hair and ky-blue
eyes, has been desperately in love with the
young lady for six months Julia is a
beautiful creature, of thu ethereal order, but
her teeth were prematurely aged James
during his long courtship wondered why his
dearest smiled so seldom. One evening she
blushingly confessed the truth. Without
delay the chivalrous young man escorted her
to prominent dentist, and at his own eX-
pense provided her with full set OF pearly
grinders.
The effect was startling. Julia was trans
formed into Venus. For few days she
received him with her accustomed warmth,
but lately, it appears, her affection died
away.
Several times he demanded an explanation,
but was greeted with a cold, glittering laugh
that haunted him even in his dreams. Dur
ing his strolls about the country those teeth
ever appeared before his gaze. And still she
was not his. He could endure the torment
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09

not constantly moving westward and aiming
for better things, with half century the
start, it is hardly surprising that the Man
chester Examiner should declare editorially
that 'if the United States were to abolish
the duty on cotton goods we should shut up
every one of their cotton mills in less than
two years" good deal of this is British
bluster, and will evoke a quiet smile from
such men as Charles II. Dalton of the Merri-
mac Mills, and dozen others l could name.
At the same time America needs judicious
protection in this as in every other industry,
In my last letter l produced figures that
show conclusively that Eugand's protective
competitors have been making greater adj
vances since 1912 in this industry than she
has done; i'll short, that they are outstripping
her in the race. 1t is nothing but British OBJ
stnacy that prevents her people from seeing
this. On the other hand the protective con-
tinent Of Europe and the United States must
bear in mind that England had half a cen
tury the start, and that this rapid growth
may be due to the fact that when these
countries ceased to be mere dependents on
England, and decided to build factories of
their own, they were unable to meet the
home demand for goods without rapidly
multiplying factories and spindles. The
actual number OF cotton spindles in the
world is estimated at 70,000000, and the
number of operatives at l 10000, viz:
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
.1.4o6,O 900 10000, 900

The latest return of the United States CEN
sus gives the total number employed in the
cotton industry and industries of which cot
ton is the chief component material as some
thing over 2000 900. But these factories, ope-
ratives and spindles are scattered over a con-
tinent 439 factories being located in the New
England States, 139 in the Middle States, 161
in the Southern States and II in the Western
States. On the other hand, of the 4S3, 900
persons engaged at present i'll the cotton
factories of the United Kingdom 372,218 are
employed in Lancashire alone, in the dis
trict described in my last letter, within an
area of twenty by thirty miles. This shows
the wonderful concentration of force in
England-a concentration that can be found
i'll no other country of the world And the
advantage possessed by England is that even
in this narrow area each town has its
specialty-a fact brought out in the begin
ming OF this letter and proved from the ease
with which different branches are kept dis
tinct. Of the 1921 persons employed in
Lancashire 101, 241 are engaged in spinning
102 1888 in weaving, 165, sos in spinning and
weaving combined, and ,, 1856 unenumerated.
Whatever may be the future of the Ameri-
can cotton industry, it is certainly in no
condition at the present time to compete
with Great Britain. That America excels
the world in some lines OF goods is true, and
tLat England steals the trademark of some
American mills is admitted by English au
thorities. | may even go so far as to admit
that this industry has emerged from its
period of infancy, but it still consumes but
half the cotton that Great Britain does, and
employs less than half the operatives. There
is a tendency among some of the New Eng
land cotton manufacturers to overesti-
mate their own strength. Reduce the pres
ent barriers ever so little and England, with
her thousands of half-fed and badly-housed
operatives, stands ready to shut up every
one of their cotton mills in less than two
years" With liberal allowance for British
bluster, there is some truth in this frank an
nouncement
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
Gives the Democracy the Gripes.

HUEdI6FVIV
Fishback, a Republican at Indianapolis,
has rendered the Democratic press of the
State great favor. They wonder why the
Republican press do not reprint the letters
and make an ado over them. The Repub-
lican editors are laying back and enjoying
the fun of seeing a so-called Republican
chuck the worms into the hungry, open
mouths of Democratic editors. The poor fell
lows hardly get Fishback's worms digested
before here comes Dan Voorhees, the Ken
lucky and Ohio Democratic conventions and
grippe them with protection doctrines. They
are in strait whether to whoop for Fishback
or for the Tall Sycamore"
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
A Neglected Point in Female Education.
Richmond Indenen,ent

Talk about neglected talents and educa-
tIon; thereis no time in a young woman's
life when her past education appears so ut
terly neglected as the moment when she is
left for the first time with her new baby.
There is great sense of responsibility which
weighs like burden and one not to be lift
ed. She may know all about entering a
drawing-room in the most graceful manner,
and how to sit down at the piano and charm
the company, but oh, what to do when the lit
tie red bunch of humanity begins TO scream
and twist is more than she can tell 1t would
be a sensible idea to establish fashionable
baby-tending schools, where all young ladies
could get practical knowledge of what to
do in emergencies such as are bound to rise
in the human family, however well regulated
they may be-
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
Let the Army Manage the Indians.

The army has an abundance of time in
which to manage the Indians. The opposi-
ton that is raised on the plea that the trans
fer of the Indian bureau to the War Depart
ment would be in conflict with the peace pol
icy is not we'll founded. There would be
more peace with the soldiers in control than
with civilians and it would not be the peace
of death, or even the quiet of oppression by
the bayonet To say that such would be the
case is an insult to the humanity OF our
army,
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
The Advantages of a Tariff.


Protective tariff means high wages-high
wages means peace, plenty and prosperity.
Were the laborer's wages doubled his con
sumption would be increased and the
demand for products would increase in con-
sequence. He would then be able, without
endangering his means of subsistence, to
devote a greater portion of his time to pur
poses of education and amusement.
Wherever wages are high, and little subject
to tluctuation, laborers are found to be ac-
tive, intelligent and industrious They are
able to enjoy their intervals of ease and
relaxation, and they would be censurable
If they did not enjoy them.
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
IT Is A FACT

THAT THOUSANDS OF OUR BUSINESS MEN
GO TO THEIR OFFICES IN THE MORNING
AFTER AN UNEASY NIGHT, OR \ LATE DIN.
NER, FEELING DULL AND ALL OUT OF
SORTS. THIS Is ENTIRELY UNNECESSARY,
FOR \ SINGLE DOSE OF THAT SPARKLING,
FoANTING SPECIFIC. TARRANT'S SELTzER
APERIENT, TAKEN BEFORE BREAKFAST
WILL IMMEDIATELY DISPEL ALL FEELINGS
OF HEAvINEsS, REMOVE GENTLY BUT SURE
LY THE CAUSE, AND QUICKEN INTO
HEALTHLY ACTION EVERY FIBRE OF TIE
SYSTEM. FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS.
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
THE WHEAT YIELD.
An Estimated Shortage of Sixty Million
Bushels.

Bushels.
New York Special.
Bradstreets' tomorrow morning will pub
lish its third annual preliminary wheat crop
report for the United States, based on full re-
plies from the principal winter and spring
wheat-growing States, bearing date June 10.
together with supplementary special teie-
grams from numerous points throughout the
wheat belt received yesterday.
From an examination of the mail replies it
is found that the favorable weather existing
since June 1 did much to repair the damage
done prior to that time by the alternate freez-
ing and thawing winter weather, the cold,
wet spring, the fly, chinch bug and rust.
Telegraphic advices to date state that the
growing weather of late has been excellent,
and that, speaking generally, an unexpected
gain has been made.
The threatened droughtin Northern Mime
sofa and in Dakota has been partly averted.
1t is possible that the damaging effect of too
much alternate rain and hot sun in the
same region may be largely averted prior to
harvesting there. Spring wheat is full two
weeks late. The quality of the winter
wheat on the whole is below the average,
The damage caused by the hot spell in Cali
fornIa has not equaled expectations, and the
probable surplus for export from the Pacific
coast from the crop OF 1888 is placed at about
one million and one-half tons. Bradstreets'
detailed esti mate Is based on returns of actual
gains made in the growing crop as we'll as on
the probable gain due to the favorable wealth
er reported by the prophets
Comparisons as TO loss and gain are made
with the final return of the national agri-
cultural bureau as to the crop OF 1882. The
out-turn of wheat indicated at the present
time in round numbers as explained, is as
follows:
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09

The people OF the State cannot be made
parties to these disgraceful bickering4
They look to the board of trustees for the
proper management of the benevolent in
stitutions, and they will hold the last Demo-
cratic Legislature responsible for the disgrace
full state of affairs which has resulted from
the election of an incompetent or disreputa-
bic board. The scandals of the past two or
three months will be thoroughly analyzed
during the next State canvass, and those
who are found to be responsible for them
will be held to a rigid responsibility for
their contemplate conduct
The Indianapolis journal., 1883-07-09
Indiana's Loss by Gambling.

Indiana is heavy loser in Chicago. This
grain gambling is an awful infatuation. A
burned child does not dread the fire, but
with scalded and blistered fingers will at
tempt to pull out the live Goals again and
again. There seems to be no cure, until, IN
the poor victim becomes unable to purchase
q margin.