Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1883-12-28
BRIGHT BITS.

ABARBER's SIGN in Chicago reads "Grihnn
Barrett"
THE man of attractive presents captures the
Christmas girl.
THE new design in shields for policemen is
a nodding- flower.
THE varnish on my new coat of arms will
take long time to dry, and am real glad 1t
is not fly time. ''-TennVson.
Two or three decayed back teeth served to
reject recruit for the British army. The
army ratIons Of beef require much grinding,
A ST. LOUIS BELLE is very proud of a fine
horse she owns. Her lover put bale OF
hay in her stocking this Christmas.-Chfcdgo
paper.
Mr. TENNYSON has written $3.50 poem on
biackbirds. and blaekblrds are only quoted at
seven cents apiece. This shows now much
raw material it takes to make poem.-LJe.
"NADAME. does smoking trouble you?'
sOh, YES, monsieur; not ordinarily, but to-
day 'Ah, madame" in very sympa-
thetic tone. ''how much you are about to
suffer-" SmOkes.-Freach FaR.
CARLYLE wrote: '.To- day is not yesterday"
Probably the great philosopher conceived tins
gOrgeonsly beautiful original thought while
sitting on the bed in the morning. yawning as
though trying to swallow the room, and feel
ing his head TO see if it was small enough TO ut
his hat.-PWck.
cant you manage to give my son one OF
the prizes at the examinations dckcu u nlOtucI
of teacher. mo, madam" was the reply,
''vour son will stand no chance; he obstinately
persists in idleness." 'Oh, but them eX-
claimed the fond mamma, III thats so you
can give him prize for perseverance"
sJohn.~ said a Philadelphia wife, 81 sup
pose we will have turky for Thanksgiving
dinner" ''NO, DEAR was the reply, I'VE
cannot afford it, 81 thought not, but I'll
make the neighbOrs believe we had. I'll open
one of the bed ticks, take out few feathers,
and scatfpr them around the ward. '-PhiLd-
delphiG Chronicle Herald.
A YOUNG TENOR obtained hearing before
director of one of the provincial theatres. lie
sang, but the manager stopped MN at the END
of three or four notes. very Wenlu mesa. ne sala;
You if it should happen" ''What do you
mean by if it should happenT' interrupted the
young tenor. why, if my theatre should
burn "WellE" II should engage You to
cry fire r'-P Partisan Paekerings.
Those Christmas bills! Those Christmas bills!
They're RI shing in like roaring rllls,
Though seasoned with the '.joY that kills"
While every child carol trills,
The thought Of those big Christmas bills
His papais heart with trembling thrills,
And twists his face like quInlne pills.
on. Christmas bills, high as the hills,
You must be paid, oh, Christmas bills!
-NeiC York Journal.
HERE is a stanza from book just published
at Washington by j. Webb Rogers. just VINO
j. Webb Rogers is does not appear, but 1t is
suspected that it may be nom De plume as
samed to conceal the identity of Private Sec
rotary Rogers and Webb Hayes:
Go trade in guanO-wave the bloody shirt;
Defame the dead; renew a nations pain;
Run from Gniteau; eat any kind OF dirt;
Be anything but Whitaker or Blaine.
In a foot note the allusion to Blaine is thus
explained: "Blaine. now almost forgotten,
was once a prominent politician who traded
in guano while Secretary Of state, ran from
Guiteau when the poor fool shot Garfield;
was remorseless in keeping up the war which
he had only seen at a distance. and like Cadet
Whitaker. pretended that the South was
about 10 cut OF his ears, which he richly de-
served