davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Portland daily press., 1883-08-17
PRACTICAL ExPERxrNCE.

MIR. GEO. D. BATES of No. 80 Cottage Street.
Lewiston, Me-, reliable and prominent citizen.
imparts the following information, May IA
1885,
Having learned of the valuable qualities Of
Hunts Remedy in practical manner, beg to state
that consider it remedy of great merit, and can
most cheerfully recommend it to any one troubled
with kidney or liver Diseases,
The Portland daily press., 1883-08-17
SUMMER HOTELS.
TEEE1 WALDO.
Little Cllebeague Island, Portland


FEvHIS Hotel, just completed by the Little Che
IL beague Island Association, will be open to the
public July g. 1888
This Island, seven miles from Portland, in full
view of the city, Is the gem of "Casco Bay"
The Hotel contains sixty sleeping rooms of good
size, broad halls, spacious dining room and parlor
yeranda on all Sides IA feet wide; lighted through
ont with gas electric bells in every room; pure
spring water conducted into each story; drainage
shore and deep sea fishing communications with the
city regular and reliable, two steamers making
round trips from Portland four times per day.
Terms reasonable. For information and terms adj
dress "THE WALDO,o Little Chebea que
Island, Portland, Maine, or ROLLINS a,
ADAMS, No, % Exchange Street, Port
land, Maine. fy3dtf
The Portland daily press., 1883-08-17
2

A TRUE assistant to nature in restoring
the system to perfect health, thus enabling
it to resist disease, is Browns Iron Bitters
COCHRAN, GA.-Dr. A. J. Lamb says: Il
never met with a remedy that gave more
satisfaction in cases of debility and pros,
tration than Browns Iron Bitters."
OwENToN, KY.-Rev. J. w. Waldrop
says, browns Iron Bitters greatly re-
neyed me OF general debility and indiges-
The Portland daily press., 1883-08-17

have turned out in every other State where
chance has been givenifor their fulflment
empty promises made for the purpose Of
catching votes and with no intention of
keeninp them
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
SCIENCE AND INDUSTRY.

Lrrc bongfellow copper mines at
Clifton, Arizona, employ over 1000
MeXicans and Cinnamon.
Jefferson Davis estate of five hun
dred acres ut Brannon, Miss, is now
mainly devoted to grapes and oranges.
Three factories in the United States
consume nearly two million eggs year
in making peculiar kind OF. paper used
by photographers.
MIR. Walsh, Mississippian, has in
vented and patented an ingenious quilt
ing frame, by which the work can
readily be done by any sewing-machine.
-DctrCH Post
The Commissioner of Agriculture
has arranged for the distribution of forty
thousand silk-worm eggs to parties in
Kentucky who desire to make expert
ments in sericulturc.
"A Canadian has invented method
of putting glass i'm sash without the en-
ployment of putty. Every family man
who has ever tried to get old putty out
of Il sash in order to put in a new pane,
will rise up and call the Canadian
"blcssed. IhiiadeL,hid NeWS.
An interesting feature ut recent
county exhibition i'm Great Britain was
an iron watch, which has been turned
out by Messrs. Crowther Bros. d. Co. in
Kidderminster, for the purpose of show
ing the extraordinary malleability of
their metal. The watch is said to be
very perfect in every respect.
1t will be but short time until YOU
can have your picture taken free of cost
| A German has invented u safe with an
attachment that on being touched flares
an electric light on the scene, and at the
same instant uncovcrs prepared plate,
on which the burglars photograph is
taken, while an alarm is sounded II
will be a 'safc cure for burglars. N.
y, Hcrdid.
Sam Collier, the veteran pugilist, is
about to apply for patent for u swim
ming machine. Ii is called Collier 5
screw propcllers are placed Oh each
foot, and they are rcvolvcd by the
wearer kicking out vigorously. Mr..
Collier has experimental i'm q bath-tub
with great success, and when the
weather is warmer he will give exhibi-
tions in the Delaware River Chicago
JOUrRm.
The taste for frogs legs is now
spreading rapidly in this country, after
n long period of comparative stagna-
ton. One of the largest dealers in the
country, II Boston man, has set hun
drcd expert frog-catcherS at work in the
New England States, and estimates that
the demand this summer will be double
that of last year. An experiment in
breeding bullfrogs in England is about
to be made and n considerable supply
of spawn will be sent over for that plIr-
pose next month -BoStoR Post
There is curious clock i'm the cathe-
dral at Lubbock, Germany. On the end
of the hour-hand there is little clock
which keeps exact time with the large
clock. This little timcpicce of course
goes round and round the larger dial, and
reminds one of q "whecl within wheel -
In Swiss museum there is a watch
that is only three-sixtccnths of an inch
in diameter II is inserted i'm the top ol
an old-fashioncd pcncil-casc such rs oul
grandmothers used TO possess. Its lit.
tie dial not only indicates hours, min.
utes, and seconds, but also days of the
month.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
The Summer Tourist.

The season is almost here when the
summer tourist makes his periodical
visit to the rural districts 1t is not
generally known whence he comes or
whittier he goes. He springs up at the
first approach of warm weather, even
as the mushroom rears its stately head
after an April shower. He resembles
the mushroom in another peculiar-hc
is generally about rs soft. He is one of
those persons who is too poor to go to u
fashionable watering-place, and too
proud to stay at home. You can easily
distinguish him from other animals,
such rs tax collectors and book agents,
by his personal appearance. He wears
u linen ulster cut dcmi-train and held
i'm place by diagonal equator of the
same material. lie will also usually
wear pair of green goggles and carry
formidable looking grip-sack in his
hand. He wears the goggles because
he started out with the intention of
finding everybody green, and it is easy
to do this when looking through green
glasses. He will engage board of some
unsophisticated farmer for ten dol
lars per month, and growl because
he docs.not get fifty dollars worth of
attention. Beside all this he will expect
the privilege of flirting with the farm
er's daughter, and should she refuse, he
considers that he has been shamcfully
treated. Flirt he must and will with
some one, if il is only the hired girl.
You are expected To rcligiously believe
all the yarns he may choose to tell con-
cerning city life, and even encourage
him occasionally to make them little
more unreasonable. lie will curse the
country, and YOU must enjoy it with as
keen relish as if YOU were swallowing
sugar-coatcd pills on the half-shell, and
even lay aside your religious scruples
once i'm while and help him curse it.
The food never suits him. He is as
fastitious as II stall-fed COW, and one
would Judge from his conversation that
he was raised on the livcrs of birds of
paradise and the distilled essence OF
roses. The truth probably is that he
boards at a fifteen cent lunch stand and
picks his teeth in front of popular ho-
Tel. Sometimes the summer boardcr Is
n woman. Then il is that YOU can
realize something of the nature of that
country where ice-cream is unknown.
Such Is the summer boarder. You never
like him so well rs when you see him
leave. Let us pray that we may never
be afflicted with him-at least not the
average summer boarder, Wdynesboro
(Gd.) Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
PITH AND POINT.

"A bread famine is threatened in
Vienna. This comes of scattering the
Vienna bakeries all over the inhabitable
globe IN Y. Gruphic.
So Gould has retired upon $780,
600, 900. Some men with that amount
of money would sit up all night. Dos
ton Transcript.
An amateur poetess anXiousiy
walls: "Oh, where can find restP'
Get position as saleswoman in Il store
that doesn't advertise, darling.-N. Y.
Commercial.
"A man sitting in the back room Of
saloon playing euchre breathes about
eighteen times per minute. A female
voice suddenly falls upon his ear and
his respiration jumps to forty-nine
quicker'n scat.-DetroU Free Press.
Did you ever think what you would
do If you had Vanderbilt's incomep-
Norristown Register. Well no; but we
have often wondered what Vanderbilt
would do if he had our income. .-IHila-
dclphid Ncws.
"A new song is entitled Brothers s
Hair was Cut by Mother" 1t is COM
panion piece to that soul-stirring hymn
called Fathers Pants VIII Soon be
Brothers." Leaning on my Brother 5
Breath Sisters Teeth are Plugged
with Zine" and the other familiar fam
lily ballads. Chicago Herald.
-Gentlcman-'You ask me for a
small gift and do not even take off your
hat from your head. Is that any way
to act?'' Beggar-.'Excuse me, most
hoI ~able sir I dare not do it, for
yonder stands policeman. If he
should see me take my hat off it will
occur 10 him at once that | am beggai
and he will arrest me. AT present, as
we are now, he merely supposes that
we are two old acquaintances having a
friendly chat. ."-F7iegemie Biatter.
I'll say, Jim, what are you doing
there with those cards?" observed a
gentleman TO his colorcd gardener. IL
Is doin' some tricks" ''Givc me little
evidence of your ability" said the gen
tleman. Thereupon the colored man
shufiied up the cards in true magician
style and performed some very clever
work with them. The gentleman
dropped quarter into the mans hand
and said TO him "Jim, you are quite a
juggler." "Oh, no, massa, am only
II negro man, sir. "-PretgeFs Weekly.
-" What time does the State Road
train leave?" asked a lady of a railroad
man. Two forty-five,h was the ready
reply. "Well, declare" she said, with
Il puzzled look covering her face. AT
lanta is the strangest place ever saw
about giving information" 'Why soP'
asked the railroad man. Because, just
now asked gentleman what hour the
train left, and he said II quarter TO three,
and now you say two forty-iive; | cant
understand il to save my life" The
man walked off leaving her to study out
the problem. ATLANTA Constitution.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

Margaret i. Sangster, having
thoughtfully rubbed her nose over the
subject, has come To the conclusion that
They'll come again TO the applc-trcc-
Robin and all the rest
When the orchard branches arc fair TO see
In the snow of the blossom drcst,
And the prctticst thing In the world will be
The building of the nest"
Yes, Maggie, they'll all se there, and
so will the English sparrow. Then
there II be a regular monkey and par
rot time for few days, after which
robin and all the rest will move over
into the adjoining township. INDIAN
apolis Journot
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

True caution: "Ma," said Jennie
Parvenuc at Newport, "they said
those Smiths who have got the Jones
cottage are awful stylish and have got
a pedigree" Got the pedigree, have
they?" said Mrs. Parvenue, cxcitedly ;
"well, you keep away from them, for
/ don't want you to catch it."-New
York Mail and Express.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

When a lady living in Chelsea sent
to London for doctor, she apologized
for asking him to come such dis
tance. Don't speak of it," answer
ed the M. ID. 81 happen to have an
other patient in the neighborhood,
and can thus kill two birds with one
stone. Columbia Spectator.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

"A thunderbolt played strange
freak in Montgomery, Ala, the other
morning. A large oak, three feet in
diameter, and about twenty-five feet
from the ground to the first limb, was
struck few feet below the bushy top.
The trunk was split in two, and the top
descended perpcndicularly to the
ground, the small portion Of the trunk
remaining Embedding itself firmly in the
exact spot from which the roots had
been torn.-N. " Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A western paper says: "Sam We'll
don was shot last night in the rotun-
da by Henry Parsons" About the
worst place man can be shot, next
to his heart, is in the rotunda. 1t in
variably proves fatal.-Norristown
Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

a lawyer was summoned as wit
ness in certain case. The judge,
finding that the witness was lying
badly, interrupted him, saying: 81
beg of you to forget your profession
for n moment and tell us the truth" I"
.-Ey
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

81 don't see how you city folk live
with no exercise at ALL" remarked a
countryman to his new boarder. "No
exercise" !" exclaimed the city man ;
"guess you never saw fellow chasing
street car."-New York News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A woman in Pennsylvania elopcd
last week with the father of her hus-
band. Probably she thought she
could 90 father and not fare worse
Cincinnati Merchant and Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

TO dissipated, sullen young scamps
who lounge about the cities, this adj
vice is given Go to the harvest
fields. There's where they can best
use sulky rake.-Pittsburgh Tele-
graph.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A young lady who has probably
had reason to doubt the veracity Of
male biped, says patches of lies are
only equaled by the lies of patches.
Boston Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
A bosn;tol nrofessor was mok;no n,

A hospital professor was making an
amputation in the presence of his
students meantime the patient groan-
ed and sobbed. Irritated at hearing so
much groaning, the professor said to
the patient: "Do me the favor to be
quiet, for we can't hear ourselves
talk. There are 100 persons here at
least, and you are the only one who is
making any fuss" The Mexican
Monitor.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

"A circus band played "Old Hun
drcd' during performance in 'ypi.es-
barre, Pa.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

An Oshkosh maid has profile of
her recreant lover cut out of ginger
bread hanging on the wall of her bed
room. She considers it too sweet for
anything.-Graphic.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
Detroit & Bav City Railroad.
GOING NORTH.
GOING SOUTH

Day and Evening Express daily, Sundays except
ed Night Express daily, Saturdays excepted.
Ii. b LEDYARD, HENRY c. WENTWORTH
Gcnl Manager, Genl Pass. & Ticket Agt.,
Detroit. Mich. Chicago. Ill.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

If n man cannot cut the grass in
front of his house he might as well
be no mower.-New Orleans Picay-
me.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

The modern martyr who suffers at
the steak is the chap who lives at the
cheap boarding house.-Boston Com
mercial Bulletin.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

There will be less loud dressing OF
the hair hereafter. Bangs are going
out of fashion Boston Budget.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
WIT AND HUMOR.

Waiting in vein-blood.-Boston
Courier.
A matrimonial city-Holyoke.-
Boston Courier.
A frame of mind-the skull.-Bur-
lington Free Press.
A man who breaks his word-the
stutterer.-New York Advertiser.
The heated term-"You're a liar.
I-Williamsport Breakfast Table.
Cutters are cheap-a big one for a
scent.-Cincinnati Merchant and
Traveller.
A stirring motto-E-motion. The
key note to success-B sharp.-Mod-
ern Argo.
"Hot love soon runs cold" That's
owing to the sighs of it.-Boston
Traveller.
Paper hangings-false reports Of
the executions of criminals.-New
York News.
We are happy to know, dear read
er, that u will always be in "luck." "
N. Y. News.
Paris Green-thc chap who has
been there for n week.--Boston Com
mercial Bulletin.
What is the difference between cos
tuners and customers 20 L know
Boston Traveller.
"There's plenty of room at the top,
is very suggestive of dudes.-Bur-
lington Free Press.
Rulers sway the people, but the
schdolmaster sways the rulers
Waterloo Observer.
The delinquent tenant revels il
owcr'ental splendor.-Cincinnat Mer-
chant and Traveller.
There will be less loud dressing o.
the hair hereafter. Bangs are going
out of fashion Boston Budget
If man cannot cut the grass il
front of his house he might us wei
be no mower.-New Orleans Picay
une.
The modern martyr who suffers a
the steak is the chap who lives at the
cheap boarding house.-Boston Com
mercial Bulletin.
BARRIERS used to pull teeth. Ant
there are some BARRIERS who would dc
it yet if the teeth only grew outside
like beard.--Burlington Hawkeye.
"There is doctor in Wisconsin
named Greene ;. Apple" The only
core to this Apple must be an am
bulance corps.-Norristown Herald.
"There is tied in the affairs o
men which leads to fortune" remark
ed young man after marrying al
heiress.-Cincinnati Merchant ant
Traveller.
"Safe blowing" is looming up as {
business. 1t has always been phaso
of human nature to indulge in blow
ing from a safe standpoint.-Pitts
burgh Telegraph.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
Advertising Rates.

business Cards, year, dollar FOR every line.
Local Notices ten cents per line for each inscrtion
aud all notices continued for three months longer
. discount Of 25per cent
Advertisements sunaceompanedby by verbal orwrttcn
directions will be published three months
Advertisements, under contract, ordered out To-
IRE expiration of time, viii be charged full rates
No paper discontinued until all arrearagcs arc i'd
except at the option of the publisher
Transient Advertisements must be paid In advance
sS-Terms CASH, payable quarterly.
Only Metal Cuts inserted.
Prices and Terms alike to all.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A man who breaks his word-the
stutterer.-New York Advertiser.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

"There is n tied in the affairs of
men which leads to fortune" remark
ed young man after marrying an
heiress.-Cincinnati Merchant and
Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

"Safe blowing" is looming up as n
business. 1t has always been phase
of human nature to indulge in blow
ing from a safe standpoint.-Pitts-
burgh Telegraph.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

Waiting in vein-blood.-Boston
Courier
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

The heated term-"You're liar.
-Williamsport Breakfast Table.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

The delinquent tenant revels il
owcr'ental splendor.-Cincinnati Mer-
chant and Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

"There is n doctor in Wisconsin
named Greene ;. Apple" The only
core to this Apple must be an am
bulance corps.-Norristown Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

BARRIERS used to pull teeth. And
there are some BARRIERS who would do
it yet if the teeth only grew outside,
like a beard. Huntington Hawkeye.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A frame of mind-the skull.-Bur-
lington Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A matrimonial city-Holyoke.-
Boston Courier.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

Rulers sway the people, but the
schdolmaster sways the rulers
Waterloo Observer.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

Cutters are cheap-a big one for a
scent.-Cincinnati Merchant and
Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

"There's plenty of room at the top,
is very suggestive of dudes.-Bur'
lington Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
AdamSOn'S S Cough BaISam
Flint & Pere Marquette R. R

The shortest, quickest, and most reliable route 10
and from Detroit, Toledo, Cleveland, Cincinnati,
Saginaw and Bay City.
GOING EAST, SOUTH AND WEST.
Leave Alpena daily, except Sunday, by Apena
and Standish line OF stages at u. IN.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08
THE GREATEST VICTORY Of MEDICAL SCIENCE.
New Trial Sizes, 10 cents.
Regular size, 30 and 10 cents.

II is pleasant to take, and cures as IL by magic
Colds, Coughs, Asthma, Influenza Hoarseness,
Difficult Breathing, and all affections OF the Throat,
Bronchinl Tubes and Lungs lendng 70
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

Drawing room cars on morning and evening trains |
between Bay City and Detroit, extra charges only |
% cents.
Night express east runs Sunday night instead of
Saturday. All other trains daily except Sunday. |
SANFORD KELLER, Sup't |
W. II. JOHNSON,
Ticket Agent, AlDcna, Mich. |
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-08-08

A stirring motto-E-motion. The
key note to success-B sharp.-Mod-
ern Argo.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-09-11
TELEGRAPHIC MATTER.

Our latest correspondence, May 16 1885, brings to us the narrative of HENRY B. INGRAM, the General Superintendent of the District Messenger Co., of New Haven, Conn. MT. Ingram says ''For many months had been sorey troubled with weak tired feel ing across the loins almost invariably accompanied with headache. had noticed also that at stated pe riods following these pains my urine would be highly colored, and leave heavy brick colored sediment when allowed to stand in the vessel could not work and was discouraged to an alarming degree. Moth ng helped me. was prescribed for by some of the best physicians in New York city where was located at that time, but derived beneft or relief When almost ready to give up in despair an acquaintance said to me, want you to try Hunts Remedy did and hardly twenty four hours had elapsed before obtained relief and in three weeks time afore- said ailments had disappeared and improved stead ily and was infused with life, that could re sume my business again, which is one that subject to strains of all kinds, which likely to affect the kidneys, namely: Erecting telegraph and tele- phone nnes Hunts Remedy now occupies the most honorsd place in my cabinet of medicines. I would not be without it, and cheerfully and heartily rec ommend it to all who troubled with diseases 0f- the liver, kidney urinary organs. It fails cure"
 33 CENTRE STREET.