Smyrna times., 1883-02-21
roR sAMPhEs gFEALL KINDS DRY GOODS
A Newly Married Couple.

trip gives very laughable account OF
a newly married couple who boarded
the train at "a way station. He says, as
the train drew up to the station the
whole car was aroused by the unusual
din, the noisy farewells, "wish you
much joy" and repeated kissings of
jovial crowd of young folks.
The newly married couple, arrayed
in wedding costumes, and evidently
fresh from the final service, took seats
in the centre of the car, and were at
once the attraction. In a very few
moments both the bride and groom |
gave evidence that there were some |
more overpowering agencies than love
at work in their systems. The groom
turned over a seat in front, and eleva-
ted his pedals he put his arm modest
ly upon the back of the seat, while the
air from the window floated the white
vail and the flavor of orange blossoms
over his face. But something was on
his mind, and he momentarily grew
more restless, and twisted and squirmed
in all manner of ways. The bride, too,
seemed to have the same symptoms.
She tried the easiest attitudes, now
with her head lovingly on his manly
shoulder, then suddenly arousing and
looking uneasily from the window, as
if in expectancy of disaster, or that she
would meet the frown of an angry
father.
Suddenly, when all eyes were at
tracted to the couple, the groom, evil
IDENTIFY receiving a new and deeper
twinge, with misery depicted on every
feature of his face, lifted his right leg,
and began tugging at a new boot
which some wicked shoemaker had in
veigled him into buying as perfect fit.
After pulls and tugs which made the
veins stand out on his face, and the ar
teries on his neck throb like small
steam engine, he succeeded in releas-
ing his foot, and sense of happiness
stole across his manly face. The bride
surveyed the smile but it only seemed
to increase her misery. She wiggled
and famed, and finally in her despera-
ton she attacked the buttons of her
new shoes with as much vigor as her
lord did his boots, and one by one
they dropped upon the floor.
Both sets of feet were placed in
proximity upon the overturned seat,
and the brides shawl hid them from
the vulgar gaze. The bonnet was uh-
limbered from its pedestal, and the
blushing bride dropped easily upon the
shoulder of her husband, and securely
slept, as the train whistled and stopped
and started. The passengers, relieved
of anxiety, had settled to cat maps and
newspapers and peanuts, when long
whistle was followed by the brakeman
putting his head in at the door anC
yelling, q" "Cresson."
"Great Jerusalem, Julia wake up
here we are" shouted the bridegroom
"and there's them Internal boots r'
He jumped at them, and tugged anC
sweat and swore, but those feet hat
actually grown about an inch, and i
was no go. The station was reached
when only one foot was stuck half wa,
in the leg. The fair Julia had encase,
her pedals slip-shod, and as time AM
tide and railroad trains wait for n
man" they gathered their traps, an,
went out just as they were, "withou
one plea" to meet the crowd of friend
assembled to meet the newly wedde
pair. As the train started, the brake
man came into the car remarking, :"
tell you, the boys at the depot are hay
ing fun over that couple" We are e1
pecting every day to hear of the sue
den death of that shoemaker, and t
see the jury bring in verdict of just
fable homicide.