Morning journal and courier., 1883-08-13
FIDDLESTRIRG GS!

I Cats are musical because their insides are keampesed -noztly@ of fddla- -strines.-Ex. l change.
 | The Western Union is offering great in- ducements to penniless French girls who are desirous of making dots. The Republican party must go.-Life.
 A woman in Pennsylvania eloped last week with the father of her husband. Probably she thought she could go father and fare worse.-Cincinnati Merchant and Traveller The eagle feels best at height of 12, 900 feet above the earth, while the minute you get 8 man on the roof of horse block his knees begin to weaken and he can't remem Der 8 word beyond 'tFellow Citizens. San Francisco News Letter.
 What is it you, my dear Adrienne?' 'tAh, Jane! How do you do? How you have you happy?" "Oh! But-and your" T am Widow."' 1T have noticed that you always have more luck than do.''
 young noblenan in frightful rail road accident missed his valet. One of the guards came up to him and said: My lord, we have found your servant, but he is cut in two" LAW, is he?'' said the young man, with Dundreary drawl, but with a trace of anxiety depicted on his countenance: "WIll you be so kind as to see in which half he has got the key to my carpet bag?"
 A Massachusetts book agent, who was wearing 8 small circular piece of court plas- ter on his face, removed it while shaving a few mornings since, and replaced it when his toilet was comp etc. Contrary to his usual experience, as he went about his business during the rest of the day he was every where received with smiles, which grew broader and broader, until at last somebody laughed in his face. Led by this to look in the glass, he was somewhat taken aback to discover that, instead of the court plaster, he had affixed to his face a little round printed labeh which had fallen from the back of new mantel clock purchased the day before, and which bore the appropriate inscription, 'tWarranted solid brass '-Exchange.
 Legal intelligence Not long since an Aus tin lawyer was appointed by the District Judge to examine candidate for admission to the bar. The young man was rather de ficient in Blackstone and Greenleaf. It looked very much as though he lacked there auisite preparation. "Do you know what fraud is in the judicial sense of the word 3'' inquired the examining attorney. ''I don't If hardly think do,' was the sGammering reply. Well, fraud exists when man takes advantage of his superior knowledge to in- iure an ignorant person" ''So, that's 1t. is 1t? Then if you take advantage of your superior knowledge of law to ask me ques- tions can't answer, owing to my ignorance, and, in consequence thereby, am refused license, will be injured, and you will be guilty of fraud Won't you, Judge 2'' The lawyer was very thoughtful for 8 few mo- ments, and then added. rehectively: My young friend. I perceive you have great natural qualifications for the bar, and I shall recommend that large, handsomely en- grossed and richly engraved license be graRt ed you in spite of your ignorance. "-Texas Siftings.
 FIRST HIGH HAT.
 met him in the crowded street.
 Twas Sabbath morn
 And on the gentle breezes sweet,
 Repentant, errinR man to greet,
 The sound of bells was borne.
 He passed me with averted eyes, And stony downcast face;
 His nfeA was cold, his look was shy,
 His vision bore 8 crimson dye,
 And he Quickened his tardy pace.
 What was it, you ask, that made him so2
 Ah! can tell you that
 It was not coldnees, you must know,
 But woe, dear reader, mental woe;
 He had his first high hati