Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1883-11-03
.MONKEYRD.p
Two Reverend Gentlemen Have
~Set-tOr NJ the Races.
ArkanSaw Traveller.

Arkansaw Traveller.
The latter-day clergymen, that is,
the more liberal class, do not regard a
race course, skilfully intermingled
with q fair association, as a place Of
immoral tendencies. Tho other day
the Rev. Mr.. Mulkittle, aud Parsoh
Jasper Muckle, from lover the hills
and far away" attended the races.
That is a noble animal" said Mr..
! Mulkittle, as he contemplated from
the grand stand the graceful proper
tons OF the iron>gray horse.
YES" Mr.. Muckle replied, but
that sorrel is better animal.
| II don't think so, Mr.. Mulkittle
pursued, He hasn't got the legs and
shoulders.
HASN'T why, You don't catch his
6ne points, Mr., Mulkittle. | used to
breed horses, aAd consider myself a
pretty fair judge"
II never bred horses, but con-
slider myself pretty fair Judge. My
father owned foe horses, fast horses,
aud the idea | got then Of horses
could, | think, serve me now, if the
question Of Judgment were brought to
the test.
What do you mean about judg
ment being tested2 Do YOU mean to
say that you would be willing to back
up your opinion1"
"0l course | wouldn't bet,Y Mr.
Mulkittle deliberately replied, 50
there would be no mistake In the
matter; but II | were to bet, should
risk the iron gray horse"
YES, and you'd lose, too
No | wouldn't. Just see that
horse step around. All, he's noble
animal, and | can hardly blame those
enthusiastic gentlemen down there for
making the situation interesting by
wagering little money"
Now, here, Brother Mulkittle,
there is only one way to settle this
question, The judgment OF man. VIC
are taught, has ever been in error, and
when man, imbued with the prevail
ing conceits Of the human family,
forgets his weakness, why then !
think it is some ones duty to teach
him. Have you got ten dollars about
you, Brother Mulkittle2"
Yes, just have, and If you are will
ing to give me ten dollars 10 order to
be reminded Of the human weakness
of which you have SO sententiously
spoken, all right"
Understand we are not betting as
ordinary men bet, but that wager
ten dollars on my Judgment and you
do likewise. If my judgment is cor
rect, you make me a present of ten
dollars, and vice versa.
"All right. Don't say anything
more, for people OVerhearing Us might
misconstrue our motives. "
After several false starts and re
calls, the horses we're told to go"
The two preachers became excited
and waved their hats. The iron gray
passed ahead at the quarter stretch,
and Mulkittle shouted, while Muckle
stood on the railing and yelled, go
on, 20 on! At the next turn the
sorrel passed the iron gray and Muckle
waived his hat in forgetiulness OF
excitement and shouted Justify,
About half way down the home stretch
Mulkittle's horse poked his nose in
advance Of the Muekle animal, and
the two preachers actually danced in
anxiety. just before passing under
the wire Muckle's herse regained his
lost ground, and beat the iron gray
head and shoulders. Muckle shouted,
slapped Mulkittle on the back, and
exclaimed:
What did | tell your"
II still say hat mine is the best
horse. Look out, don't you slap me
that way. People will think you are
drunk" ui
Give me my $l0.p r..
" Not right here-people will think
We have been betting.
! Don't try 10 get out Of it, Mulkittle.
You have lost the money fairly, aud
| want j" .rfilg cHttIta
did | say l wasn't going to give it
to your"
"NO, but you keep on monkeying
around about it. /"
Il don't know what you mean by
'monkeying, sir. Please explain your.
self" tlfFllffT
Give me my money and III give you
all the explanation you want"
You shall have the money 10 due
season. | have gone in debt quite a
number Of times in my life, and /
don't know that | have ever failed to
discharge an obligation; but when
you call me a monkey, sir, don't
like it.
Il did not call you monkey"
you did. SIR"
81 said that you we're monkeyine n
well, but nothing but a monkey
can resort 10 a performance, sic,
which you are pleased 10 call monkey
ing"
"0h, well, if you will be amonkey,
in spite Of everything | can do. be
one, but want ten dollars out Of
your pocket all the same.
"A monkey has no pocket, I'll in,
form you" a1'
But a 'possum has. and come to
look at you, you are more Of 'possum
than a monkey" IAH
That last straw, sir, broke the
camels back. Come out where no
body can see Us and I'll whale you.
II shall 90 nowhere with you, Tor as
you have already robbed me Of ten
dollars you might further indulge
your inclinationS and rob me Of ten
I'm pay you for this.
You'd better pay me that ten dol.
lars you"
"Iou genIlemen been betting here?"
asked an officer. II have orders t
arrest all parties who do not bet in
the way prescribed"
Betting, why bless you, no. said
Mr.. Muekle. This gentleman owes
me ten dollars for dog"
And here's your money! replied
Mllkittle, producing the ten dollars
which the other preacher accepted.
Il would have paid you sooner, butt
oh. it made no difference, as |
knew you were perfectly GOOD, and
the two men parted with show Of
Kindness which neither Of them felt.
=--a
THE FUNDING mann