The new North-west., 1883-01-05
A SIUOx REPAST.
Biii Nye's yeritable Account of the Ignoble
Aboriginal Dives.
Laramie Boomerang.

One OF the peculiarities of the latest
United States styles Of feeding the noble red
man is the fact that he Is given government
rations, and at the same time appropriations
are made which are supposed to maintain
him.
Sometimes wild Indian, who don't know |
much about groceries or how 10 prepare |
them for food, comes IN aud draws his regu- |
lar soldier rations in this way. For instance,
up in the Sitting Bull country, while ago,
an Indian came in from the warpath who
had never seen any Of the pale-face style of
food, and drew his rations.
He made light meal of ungrouud coffee
tie frs. day, aud as he oyerate, and the
& flee swelled on him, he had difficulty in
iAaGtoning his pants aronnd the pain tha. he
| had on hand.
He felt very unhappy for day or two, but
laid it to the fact that he hadn't exercised
much, and the consequent ennm and indi-
gestion resulting therefrom.
As soon as lie succeeded in getting his in
terror department quietsd down a little, he
tackled his rations of candles. These he
decided to parbsil, in order TO avoid trouble
from indigestion. The dish was not so much
of glittering g success as he had anticipated,
and as he remorsefuily picied the candle
wicking ont of his teeth with his tent-pin
he made some remark that grated haIshly
on the aesthetic ears of those who stood
near.
He then tried a meal of yeast powder with
vinegar. He ate a yeast powder and then
took drink of extremely potent vinegar to
wash it down.
At first there was feeling Of glad surprise
in his stomach, which rapidly gave place to
unfailing remorse.
A can Of yeast powder in all Indians
midst don't seem to be prepared for pint of
vinegar, and the result of such an unfortun-
ate circumstance is not gratifying.
Every little while look of pain would
come over the features of the noble child OF
the forest, aud then he would jump about
seventeen feet and try to kick cloud oat OF
the sky. Then he would sit down and think
over his past life.
1t took a week for him to get back where
be dared to get up another meal for himself.
Then he fricasseed couple pounds of laun-
dry soap and ate that.
Soap is all right for external purposes or
for treating pair of soiled socks, but 1t does
not as ,ImilaLe with the gastric juics readily.
and those whs have tried laundry soap as a
relish de- hot seem to think that IL will ever
arrive al any degree of prominence AS all
article of diet.
That is why this untutored child Of nature
swore. lie had never received the benefits
, of early training in profanity, and his Ian
/ guage, therefore, was disconnected and ram
, bling; but when we consider that lie was
, ignorant of our language, and that every
5 little while he had Ia stup and hold on TO his
I disestor with both hands aud dig great
: holes In Ihe earth with bus toes. The re-
inasas di,in't IN altogether out of place o.
irrelevant.
!. When gallon or So Of agiI ated baking
a powder aud vinegar is singing its little SOM
! n the irr..tm"st rr,.'sses Of an Indian, an'
y tins had hrri f.!l"S"d hy a Treatment o
. laundry zap, the 3 ulrnL "f human na'ur
i eau tud vide field frr observation IN tia
i, u lucality.
:. The earnest aud occupied look, tn
d troubled Xpfessiun of the cnnntenance, fol
II lowed 10y the quick nervous twltching OF th
Is muscles Of the face, aud then the swelliu
q q up aud The bursting Of the suspender buttor
J. the deep drawn 81 IN AMI tlls SIN pthsrc d Gus
ct word, all betoken the sastric agitation goin
OH within.
r, This IS why All lHdian prefers link {
e bologna saugase Of a two oyear-old dog 10 th
= = high. priced groceries SO common to ou
"A modern civilization.