South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1883-08-24
WIT AND IIUnIoR
While her mother was taking a Nv
OCT oi The butter, little Daisy asked /:
is that butterfly, mamma p

"""o "eT "Vther was taking ny
OCT Of The butter, little Daisy asked |:
is that butterfly, mamma p
In . nutshell: Yes said the repor-
ter, always carry my copy in nv hat
Il see.' replied Fogg. news in nut
she'll
Her father stood at the gate talking
with n gentleman, and seven-ycar-
old miss threw GU. several hints abou.
supper being ready withou. success.
A, length. anxious and impatient, she
called ont from ,hs side stoop: 'Papn.
II you don't come right in to supper the
ice cream will all get cold =
Two ladies te.e-a-tetc: .rba, Mrs
Brown 10 just as mean as she can be
Why. would you believe it, she told me.
RICH. to my face, that l dressed too
young for n woman Of my years The
idea! 'Shc did 2 Well, if she'd talk
TO me that way l believe III told Lor
just what / thought Of her. On, 70.
dear; that would be rude Possibly
But l did better. ] told Mrs. Smith
what my opinion Of Mrs. Brown was
and Mrs. Brown will hear it soon @.
nough And thon you know i. won't
lose anything in Mrs. Smiths mouth
1t is one of my principles, love, never to
do anything disagrs.ablo when l can
get somebody else TO do it for me-
Boston Transcript.
A little boy and girl out in the Yves,
end OF town were discussing the stars.
Tho little 10y said they were worlds
like ours, and have people on thern.-
The littlo girl, with all The disdain she
could muster, said: They arc not
they are angels eyes, cause saw them
wink
lhe baroness has charming little
daughter, but who is terribly iudis.
Greet. The other day, in the midst of
reception, baby cried and writhed on
account Of the toothache. Her mother
tried TO console her.
There, my darling, be reasonable
don't cry. Your toothachc will pass
away
How will it go away p replied baby,
her voice broken by sobs. L cant
tako my teeth out as yol can, mamma i!
oashfnl young man went thrice to
ask beautiful young lady if he might
DC the partner of her joys ard sorrows
and other household furniture. but each
time his heart failed him and lie took
tho question away unpopped. She saw
the anguish Of his soul and had com.
passion on him. SO the next time he
came Sue asked him il he thought to
bring q screw driver With him. He
blushed and wanted TO know wha. for.
ANA she. in the fullness of her heart.
sad shs didn't know bat he'd want TO
screw UP his courage before he left.
lie took the hint and the girl.
In primary school, not long ago,
the teacher undertook TO convey TO her
pupils an idea Of the use of lie hyubon.
She wrote on The blackboard, birds
nest and pointing TO the hyphcn asked
the school, What is that for p After
short pause, young son of the EN-.
erald Isle piPcd out, 'Flazc, ma'am. for
the bird TO roosht onl'
Mrs Spagsins was boasting OF her
new house. The windows, she said
were etained. That's too bad; but
won't tnrpcntine or benzine wash it
off, asked the good Mrs. Oldboy.
= III you want 10 find good logician.
go to your tailor. The other day one
OF these fractions OF tue human family
was overheard to remark: Il never ask
gentleman for money But, suppose
he doesn't pay you P Well, if he
doesn't pay INC within q reason able
time, | oncIuGc ho is not q gentleman
and then / ask him
WHAT We DECENTRALIZATION sec
dat free bus over dar on de Souar.
Charlie p
Yes see dat bus, caus' see it,
well, why am massa Jerry Hills
pants like buses p
Dose pants he's been wearing for dc
last twenty year. as was built in AR
Yes denis dc ones; dose old white
pants
Why's dey like free buses. ell ?
OATS what / said; why's dcy like
free busses ?
Two hose busscs,or four boss busscs?'
Doan make no difference what kind
1pv il. dat ,;,', IL,