davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1883-02-17

The report of the commissioners who exams
med into the working of the New York Post
office commend its general efficiency and advo-
cate a reduction in the amounts of the higher
salaries and an increase in the number of clerks
in the several divisions.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1883-02-17

The s.llnaa ,. Allen ha. already begun as
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1883-02-17

~, ,eli men that they cannot help them,
i 70 aing them into recklessness and
desuair.-FFOaTde.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1883-02-17
ODE

ON rnE FIRST CONTEMPLATION DAY OF KAsEHlNEHi
THE GEEAT-
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
The Lemonade Mans story.

"Lem'nsdel Lem'nade!" The man
that daily shouts this ~seasonable bever-
age in the down streets gave a New
York Morning Journal reporter the rec
ipe for making a fortune in one summer
in the business.
Ten lemons Of questionable quality
may be had for three cents, pound
of white sugar 10 cents, mixed with a
pail Of water and sold at ] and 3 cents
a glass, average forty glasses to q pail,
ten pals a day, gives a profit of 5000
per day." And | make that amount
many a day during the summer" said
the lemonade man.
"What do you do with the money?''
"Faith and find plenty 10 do with it.
The tiniment house what ! own down in
Sullivan strate needs a great looking Of.
Their, with the way Thin bloody tinints
riot livery no1ght, and bate me out OF
the rint. Thin there's my wolfe, for
the last twinty wears that woman
has niver been two weeks at a
time of the Island, but l stick to her,
sur yes, sur. Vance she was as foine a
looking woman as niver trod the floor Of
a house, but she always loved drink.
and so the moment she romes of the
Island she commences drinking, thin
she gives ne q sound beating, thin the
Judge sends he5 up for nointy days and
I furnish her with some Injuries in the
prison"
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
Disraeli,s STANDARDIZATION.

Lord Ronald Covers "reminiscences.
We sat after luncheon beforeA olaz-
ing FIRE in the library. His mind seemed
to be full of the past and Of his youth.
He spoke Of his early friendship with
the three Sheridan sisters, all beautiful
women; the present Duchess OF Somer.
set, once Queen Of Beauty" of Lady
Duderein and of Mrs. Norton. He de-
scribed how delightful were the dinners
in old days at Mrs. Mortons, over a pub
lie house near Storey's Gate, more than
forty years ago, and the wit and humor
that then flowed more c~opiously by far
than the claret. Lady Dufierein was
bis chief admiration, beautiful
than her beautiful sisters "DTeamsl
dreams!n he murmured, gazing at the
fire and smoking a cigarette he had ac-
cepted. II have not smoked, dearest,
since you we're Fast here" The next
time i was at Hughenden was to follow
his coffin to the grave. But | cra still
fancy i see him among his beloved
books, gazing at the fire, and murmur-
ing in an absent way: dreams. drCamsi'
And after all, what is this life but one?
And how often so sad a one that one
would faiu wake from out Of it, for to
die is to live. Life" Lord Beacons-
field said to me the last time | was with
him at Hughenden, life is all ennui, or
all anxiety"
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
Sayings of Famous Women.

The young and beautiful Madame
d'Houdedot, being asked Of what she
was dreaming, when found, during her
last illness, in a pensive mood, replied:
81 am regretting myself!'
Said Catherine of Aragon, 81 would
rather be a poor beggar's wife and be
sure Of heaven, than queen Of all the
world and stand in doubt thereof by
reason OF my own consent"
I'VE shall soon say our prayers in
French" said Catherine de Medici, when
the Hugenots, who cond ucted their SER
vices in the vernacnlar, we're reported
TO be gaining the upper hard during b
minority Of Charles IN.
When Speaker Croke alluded, in 1901,
to the Armada having been driven of
"by the mighty arm OF our dear and sa-
cred queen" Elizabeth Interrupted him:
"No, Mr.. Speaker, but by the mighty
hand Of God"
When Suwarrow informed Catharine
II. Of the capture Of Prague in 1894, by
writing, "Hnrrahl Praguel So garrowl'
the Empress promoted him in equally
concise terms; Bravo! Field-marshall
Catherinev'
Seeing that the victory Of Prussia over
Austria in 1866 threatened to destroy the
prestige Of France, the Empress Eugene
exclaimed, pointing 20 the Prince In
perial: That child will never reign, II
nothing be done 10 efiace Sadewa."
OF Madame de Ia Suzc, who became g
! catholic, because her husband, from
whom she had separated, was a Hugue-
not. Queen Christina has remarked,
"She has separated herself from her
husband flat she may see him neither
in this world nor in the next"
4 is related Of the Duchess Of Bur
gundy, that she asked Louis XIV. and
Madame de Maintenon, why in England
queens governed better than kings, and
answered the question herself: Be
cause under kings il is the woman who
govern, and men under queens"
When Maria There's was asked.
shortly before her death, % take a sleep.
ing-pUrtiou, she replied. 81 could eicCp-
but ] must not. U,afl Is too near; lie
must not steal upon ue; these fifteen
years since her husband dClthl have
been waiting for him | Will meet HIN
awake"
Louis XIV, on his leath-bed, ex-
pressed the hope to Madame dc Mail
tenon, that they should soon meet again.
She made him no answer, but exclaimed
as If unconsciously. when she LEFT the
apartment: "a pretty rendezvous he
has given me- The man has never
| loved any but himself"
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
seen Rohind fhe Scenes.

The public has formed a wrong i'm
of Mary Anderson" said the
smanly scene shiter. people think
as alivingiceAerg. Nothing could
nrther from the truth. She is for all
rSworid like a big school girl. choke
nll ofanimal spirit and Overlooking with
Nllity. Why, l have seen her bound
into wings, and in the exuberance Of
her frolicsome disposition jump on a
mans back and make him carry her.
leebergs don't do that. She Is just the
sweetest, incest, and best girl you ever
met. and not a bit stuck up when you
some 10 know her. When Louis James
was playing Romeo TO her Juliet, in this
theateT Two or three years ago, he took
her nose between his teeth when she
stopped over 10 take the poison of his
lips, and held her an unconscionable
time. Mamma Griffin saw what he was
doing, apd she vas in an agony Of fear
lest the audience should see IL two.
just look at that DEVIL she cried, com
ing over TO where I was standing, he is
biting Mary's nose right there on the
age. Oh, l wish ] could get at hImp
That a cirrus there was when the cur
ain runf ownl Mary chased James all
Yer the age with a piece Of board, and
he col nv looked on and split their
tat the sight. Sen Sher-
liked iarf Anderson uL.
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
The Ready Tongue of an ''Am-
bassador of Commerce."

Not long ago Il Hartford drummer was
warned of the crusty disposition Of a re-
taller IN one of the central New York
cities. and informed that while he nad
better call upon him, the firm would no
be disappointed should he fail to trans
act n business. a'Tll sell him" said
the Hartford boy, confidently. Arriv-
ing at the city in question, he paid his
nrst call upon the man he had been
warned against. He found him sitting
upon a high stool before a desk, porting
over the pages of s ledger. As the
drummer entered he just turned his
head, took in the sample case, said:
"Humph," and went on with his figures.
After a lapse Of five minutes he said
without looking up:
"If You are a drummer | don't want
to see you, so don't waste time here"
But Pm not q drummer" was the re-
ply,
''What in-are you, them" inquired
the retailer.
81 am an ambassador of commerce"
answered the salesman, nothing daun'
ted.
Ambassador what well, l can talk
with you"
aft you only knew it, there's a man
in one of the leading institutions in
Hartford that would give 500 to talk
Will me-
"What sort OF a mar is he2"
Hes deaf and dumb"
~ this response the retailer came
down from his high stool and before be
left the drummer had his name in bis
book OR a handsome bill of goods
farff0rd Post.
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
Rigidity of Court Etiquette.

The court etiquette, observes a Lon
don correspondent, has grown more
rigid and ihflexible during these months
Of increasing morbidness. and soon, it is
feared, the queen will be as far removed
from her people as a Chinese emperor.
She carries out her willful insistence
upon etiquette in every least detail, and
even when it concerns only her own
children and grandchildren. When the
Princess Louise returned from Canada,
and arrived at Windsor, she was kept
waiting until she had changed her attire
and until the queen had sent word she
was prepared to receive her. 1t is re-
ported that the princess entered the
drawing. room in the evening TO await
dinner, dressed in a most lovely Grim
son velvet gown, With crimson silk
hoes to match. The queen happened 10
espy the princesses's feet, said; DO
YOU know that colored stockings are not
permitted in my %presence3 Go to your
room at once and change your stockings"
And so the poor princess came down to
dinner in a crimson velvet dress,
wearing white stockingsl No one
of the royal children ever
visits the queen except by special and
formal invitation. Her majesty APP
points the hour for her own children TO
come and for them to 20. One can inn
agine the unnaturalness Of such house,
hold. The Prince Consort was stately,
but he was a genial happy, mirth-loving
gentleman. Ills was a most R3ectionate
husband and father, and no royal ETH
Quette ever stood in the way Of his fine
German h~eartiness. Since his death bis
children have had no parental
companionship, and they are as far re-
moved from the queen as though they
had not been born Of her. 1t is well
known that the prince Of Wales has very
great influence with his mother, and IS
personally deeply attached 10 her. He
was q constant companion OF his father
and he quite remembers how his father
managed the queen in the old days.
The prince is said TO be most charming
in his relations TO his mother, and is al
ways upon his most beautiful manners
in her presence. He at times does ap-
proach her with great affection, and
even tenderness Of feeling and demon
ktratiOQ.
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
story of a Prison Keeper.

On Aug, 10 Robert Caskey will com
plete Fifty years Of constant service as
assistant warden Of the Western peni-
Tertiary Of Pennsylvania period of
service said to be without a parallel in
prison records. Mr.. Caskey has lived
several years beyond the biblical limit,
but is still a hale and hearty man.
Eyes, l have had some fights" he said
the other day to a reporter. "The
worst I ever had was with a prisoner
named Duffy. I went into his cell, and
he asked me if / was prepared 10 die. 1
laughed, and told him ! had no trouble
with him; but he answered, i have
sworn to kill the first nan that came
m here With that he asked, Have
YOU a knife? No said !, i haven't
well, take this he said lie had got
two shoe knives from the shop and
fastened them in a piece Of hickory
broomstick, a blade sticking u each
for ano. her such weapon from the hing
es Of his bed. IL was this knife he
threw 70 me when he said Take this
and as Quick as that he struck at me
with the knife be kept. There we were.
IL was dinner time and no about,
and like two duelists We faced each 9TH
er. He missed me the first time, and
on his second blow his knife passed be-
tween my left arm and my body. l
shut down on it, and | held it there.
Duffy had my other hand, and l
couldn't strike, but he was in the same
fix. Then we struggled, neither speak
ing. Twice we went down, but without
breaking our holds, and l never thought
of shouting. Finally, in kicking about
the cell, we knocked over the bench and
the noise was heard by the chaplain.
He ran down and assistance came that
oyerpowered Duffy. Both of us were
worn out, but neither was cut"
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16

Bible stories read to her, ran to her
mamma the other day and said, eagerly,
"Oh, mamma, please read me that pref
ty story again about little Moses with
the bulls rushing after himl'
dad, we're you ever a ish?" The
individual thus addressed lowered his
chin and gazed over his spectacles at
the boy in speechless astonishment.
ooh, don't get mad at me, dad, for ask
ing you" continued his inquisitive of
spring. MRS. Cody came in after you
had gone yesterday, and asked b she
would do ifyou we're dead, and ma
laughed and said she guessed there was
as good a salmon in the sea as you
are"
On his way home from his western
trip, the Rev. Doctor Talmage saw a
man on the train whom he thought he
knew, and, approaching him, he asked
politely if he was not the Rev. Doctor
Sturges. "No you don't" replied the
man. You don't get me into no game
and ring in four kings on my jacksl I've
travelled too much right on this inel'
The doctor apologized and turned away
do you know who that was you in
suited so grossly2" asked the conductor
o. the stranger, in an angry tone. mo
/ don't" replied the stranger. That wa
the gospel" "Just my internal luckl
calculated the man; Chats me, clean
through thought he was a card sharl
from Reno. If I'd known he was a sur
enough minister, I'D have gone into hi
poker game in a holy minute. | say
You o and explain to him, and tell hir
he can use his own deck If be likes.
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
people and their represent

American people and their represent
tives in congress assembled, is their
protection for American giants2 Do
the great republic, builded on the foun
dalton rock Of eternal justice, AID oe-
mented with the. best'dehbrinated blood
Of our fathers, standing in the broad
light OF the nineteenth century, intend
to assert its rights, or will 1t stand tame
ly by and see its bravest and dearest,
the best giants that climate can build and
none can hire, trampled under the
iron heel Of the pauper midgets Of the
effete monarchies Of the east2 Down
with the Golden Club? for we can see
the hand Of the British gold in this, and
we will scotch the storm that, like a
treacherous friend. is brewing at our
feet. and waste its sweetDss- an the de-
serted village. (Tht emaining chap
tiers Of this beautiful and eloquent ro-
nance will be found in The Congress
ional Record, for sale by al respectable
druggists. None genuine without the
glass blown in the bottle. or close by it,
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
Facetious

This soup, waiter, is cold. Can't YOU
bring me some warm souP?' why.
sab, you mus be mistakin' sab. Dat
sour was so hot hat Il took all the skin
of my thumb, sab, when fetched 1t in,
sab" The stranger concludes that he
will ioreeo the soup -nu Jake a walk
Honkers Star.
A man named Gasbii recently applied
TO the Arkansas Legislature % change
his name because hisgirl always objected
90 his figure whenever be metre. She
said le was too high and turned him of.
The Judge.
a pretty little fury who hyes iu Wash
iu-flu, and who verv fond u having
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
ItnIy,s Richness in Actors.

Italian singers are appreciated all over
the world, but l do not think that Italian
actors are equally appreciated. sllvini,
Ristori, Rossi, and a few others, who
have had the means to travel on their
" account, are known abroad. But
Italy is full of such actors, and could get
together a company superior 10 anything
in France, England, Germany or Amer
lea. Marini, Tessero. Campi, Ruta, and
a host Of others are superior TO any
Bernhardt, and More!i, Dominica, Pas
Ia, Emanuel, are all Salvinis. But Sal
vini has had the lead of them, and none
will ever now make the same effect as
he has done. All the great actors and
actresses in Italy travel about with COM
panies Of their own. They are com
pelled 70 do this, because there is no
stock company in any town in Italy.
This is ruinOus to the Italian drama; but
so it is. Rome, however, is to have a
national company for six months in the
yea-, and this is to begin next winter
Ia the meantime it is travelling nov
from town 70 town, like any other CONF
neutrality-suspicious. Boston Tuus.
eerlptA
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16

since the papers blasted him for kissing
the chorus girls he has never gone be-
hind the l~scenes. When Bob Downing
Joined her company be says to her:
Now, Mary, when / play Romeo 10
your Juliet, / am going to make love to
you with as much %earhestness as though
] we're dead mashed on you. There will
be no foolishness about my love-making.
| will kiss You Just as a real-sure-enougn-
lover would do. l want that understood
ALI right, Bob she replied; that's just
what / want you to do Oh, yes, Mary
Anderson is an iceberg.-in your mind
she is"
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
SaVed.

There we're times during the Sepoy
rebellion in India when men we're more
to be dreaded than wild beasts; but the
following minor incident of that reign
Of terror shows how the lives OF two
English sold iers, exposed to both perils,
we're strangely saved through the pref
erence Of, tiger for native flesh. The
young men had been suddenly captured
on rear-grard duty by a proving band
Of Moslems, and we're being marched to
the place Of imprisonment and torture.
At the frst nights camp, they were
me2Itating escape in the vain hope that
their guards would fall asleep
Two hours passed. The fire burned
low, and in spite OF the danger of their
situation, were Just dropping of 10 sleep
when there was a tremendous roar-a
rush of some great body passing over
them; a scream from one Of the natives;
a yell Of terror from the rest.
A tiger stood with D OF the guards
in his mouth, growing iercely, and
giving him an occasional shake, as a cat
would shake a mouse, while n OF its
paws held down the PROSTATE Inquire oil
the other.
There was a wild stampede. Men
tumbled over each other in their efforts
TO escape from the terrible presence
and then, getting to their feet, started
Of ut full speed. For a moment the
English soldiers had lain paralyzed by
the sudden advent OF the terrible man
eater, and then had like the rest dafted
away.
30 the j~ungle!" Ned exclaimed; and
in an instant they plunged into the un'
dergrowth, and were forcing their way
at full speed through it.
Man-eatIng tigers are rarely found II
pairs, and there was little fear that an
other was lurking in the wood; and ever
had such been the case, they would
have preferred death in that form, t.
being murdered IN cold blood by the
enemy.
Presently they struck on a track lead
ing through the wood, and followed il,
until in five minutes they emerged OIL
the other side. AS they did so they
heard a report of firearms in the direc
ton of their last hating place, ant
guessed that the peasants we're firing a
hazard in hopes Of frightening tine tige
into dropping its prey. As TO their owl
fight, ii was probable that so far thei
enemies had not thought of It.
The first object OF the fugitives was +
get as far as possible from their captors
who would at dav-break be sure to or
ganize a regular hunt for them, and &C
cordingly they ran straight ahead unit
in three quarters Of an hour they cam
into a wide road.
Towards morning they spied a large
fortified house, evidently the abode c
some person of consequence. and de
termined to climb the garden-wal, ant
risk the chances of finding shelter an
and protection. The house fortunatel,
proved TO be the home Of a Hindoo lady
OF rank, who sympathized more witt
the Englishthan with the Mohammedan
and by her kindness they were put II
the way Of escape and final restoTatiC
10 their friends.-In Times of Peril.
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
FooLMILLI0-JAIrEs
New Workers Who Ha dore Dol
lars Than scBs-

lars Than scBs-
New YORK Correspondence "a brooklyn
Eagle.
About this time every year. then the
u,nmer season comes upon US, j 9th
er topics are slack, we have Tia, snncal
,san N about old seabury b wsteri
the } who has wasted Eve million
dollar ~ his stuboornness an eccen-
| tricity. The old mamie is nog 20 odd
wears old-lives at the New Yo < hotel
where he has resided twenty years, eats
at the corner Of the same table, tnd eats
4 exactly the same kind Of food en- each
succeeding day. Five cents i to him
of more consequence than S. Is to most
2 men, though he rolls in wealth.
still he has steadily refused for twenty
years to rent wv of the most valuable
buildings in the whole city ofNew York.
These buildings are numbers 81 and $40
Broadway, and they scould he readily
rented at any time for S5O,0O0 a year.
Careful business men have made an es-
\ innate OF the loss of five million dollars
: on their rental for twenty Years. All
Z sorts Of prices have been offered for the
structures, but Brewster has declined 10
rent them at any figure. SO they lie
idle. Merchants in the city have revolt
ED, as they say il does them positive
tarm to have vacant buildings in such q
business part of the great th~oroughiare,
nut their efforts are ~unavailing
The old man still refuses to rent
ssAhem. This seems to be a fated locality
i I'm Broadway, for on the next block
kbove is a row Of fine buildings which
have suffered from the same faie as tina
(which afflicts the Bre wster buildings
fThey are of brick, painted yellow, anC
are very valuable, but they are almos
vacant. The owner is q lean and crab
| bed old man, who personally inter
i views everybody who wants 70 move IN
A man win go to him and say:
81 wish to rent the second store iron
! the corner"
"Do your" the old man will say
The prIce is $4,000 a veal"
81 will take IT," the applicant says.
"What b~usiness?" is invariably th'
next question of the owner.
The man will then state his business
but let it be dry goods, millinery, manu-
featuring, carriage binding, clothing, o
anv other business that is known d
trade and the answer of the old man in
variably is: "Ah, OF course you car
take the building, but o will be
dead failure. This particular kind o
business has been tried there man.
times. and il has always failed. On sec
ond thought, l don't think l will let yol
II have the building at any price, for
business failure always ~deprecates tn
II property"
"But," the man will say, al will Civ,
you more rent; l will take a lease 70
ten years"
"No, no." the old millionaire Away
replies, you would only make a failure
and l don't care 10 be bothered by
falling firm" So the house remain
empty al the time, except occasionally
when a business firm takes it. The oil
nan invariably drives them out at tn
ed 0. the yea, however.
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
supposed Speech of a Congress
man.

Che-mah, the imported midgetin Bar
NUNS c%ircls, is only twenty eight inchts
high. WeIg twenty-five pounds, and j
paid r. sslary Of one hundred and fifty
dollars o. week, While Colonel Goshen,
the native born American giant is seven
feet eleven iu hes tail, weighs four hun
dred and ~elghtv-three pounds, and is
paid a a beclarly spittance Of seventy
live dollars q week. And we ask the
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16
DING OF CAT I T


7nocat PraviousIr R,fep nv R..tr
~ Exhars,ed bv paroyvsw
g
Ne" 'oIA 9uH,
A lao named r. j. byrnes sixteen
years old, living at Fort Hamilton on the
shore road was, playing With the
family cat about six weeks AGO. when
he y@icionsIv scratched him across bis
faca from his rignt eor 10 his lin. in1ict-
ings wound nom which blood flowed. The
caf;s face was lacerated M the time Sine
III ne nov nv wounds = a
6obt win doc He
s5ions carseG 6ert
~ tbo,gLt ~ Il
Eridey last whs
IL ccmrioines
- ;o15 ny
~,notSa"ba I
oUea SaIir;or
- Mn bisE
5 ~
Ia
Snatty ~ n,
,JaSa ra-o
amS 80 - cosa cnbolia
W. - - ~ .,orI,ic in;ec.;ona
o. "u' e'pa'h muyn
NULsS' EoI Ham
" W.T. M.
~ple. iLe 49,
TO time thro-c. In. omen 1ar. irritated
him almost f1 La. moss lis hearing
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16

Grae. Cresuwool islwri
0l N.ctom
The Mineral argus., 1883-08-16

The r 1r.s of l-est damsgt
lle late lrm wers almost v
atoms 4e 0.s,s were ver
heard % 20