Seattle daily post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, W.T. [Wash.]) 1881-1888, 1883-03-08

THE WAYS or WOMAN WITH HER
MONEY.

With all his marvellous wisdom Soio
mon candidly admitted that there were
three or foar things too wonderful FOL
him.
This avowal is creditable 10 the Ole
man. He didn't clsim To know every
thing. and b. rein he differed from u any
people / have known in this blessed
nineteenth century.
The undersigned, like good old Solo
mon, occasionally comes across some
thing that il u triile too Opaque Tor him
to sac through.
One of the things that makes your
uncle "give it up" is the way the aver
n0e woman manages her finances IN pub
lie places.
Now have heard cynical old bachelors
say that some married women wear
the trowsers." | don't believe 1t. be-
cause / never saw @ woman on a shop
ping excursion who did not carry her
pocketbook in her hand. Now wouldn't
woman carry her pocketbook in her
pocket, like man, ii she wore
But let that drop.
When woman sallies forth on shop
ping excursion, she seemingly chal-
lenges the whole of thiefdom to rob her.
Her pocketbook she seems To regard as
an object Of bonndless pride. and she
f. takes ~ much pleasure in exhibiting 1t
as n yeung mother does in showing her
first baby.
She steps into a car to reach the first
store in which she proposes to pounce.
She seats herself gives her pocketbo0k
q preliminary flourish, aud then opens
it. She first pulls out n stuff, little
wad Of bank bills-usually one dollar
bills-and then she commences wild
search at tho bottom for five cents in
change.
In this exploration she works like
diver in search of treasure. She first
brings upOne cent, deposits IL in her left
hand, and then makes another dive. The
next haul develops two cent piece,
which she places with the result OF her
fir haul, and then down TO the bottom
of that ppcketbook she goes again. She
paws around there like young husband
searching the manielpiece in the dark
for the soothing syrup bottle At last
her hand comes out again, and another
penny is the result. In she plunges
again, but after desperate effort TO find
another cent she gives il up, and at last,
with seeming regret, she produces a half
dollar.
Now what does she dor Both hands
are taxed to the utmost. The four cents
are inst all that she can manage in her
gloved left hand; she has the half dollar
and the wad Of bills i'll her right, aud
for moment abe seems to be ut a loss
what to do. Bot not long. The half
dollar goes into her moath. Yes. inva-
riAbly. Then with her right hand she
nrst re-dsposits the coppers, then stuffs
IN the NAd OF bills. clasps the pocketbook
and looks up to see how many male
wretches are Watching for a chance TO
pass up her fare TO the money box. This
is a bobtailed ear.
One OF the male wretches secares the
half dollar. passes it to the driver. re-
ceives the change bag, opens il, puts five
cents in the mouey-box and hands the
balance to the lady. She pays him for
his trouble with nod and proceeds 10
count the change.
And this is the way she does il:
Five and ten and fifteen and ten are
twenty and ten are thirty and Ave are
thirty five and five are forty. Why, dear
me, l am i've cents shnrtrs
She casts look OF suspicion on the
wretch who handled her money and then
proceeds to count again. The same re-.
suit!
Now she has heard OF men stealing
money. and she don't propose 10 he swim.
died. She casts whitening glance nj the
aforesaid wretch, and everybody in the
car compreheuds the situat on, The
wretch. with CRIMSON face aud embar-
rassed manner, timidly approaches.
II beg your pardon, madam; is the
change not right"
No, sir" she replies promptly. and
somewhat snappishly. "rhere il is.n
and then she casts q glance which means.
Won't somebody have the kindness q,
call policeman?''
The wretch elances at the change and
counts: Five aud ten ara fifteen. and
ten are twenty five. and ten are thirty.
1ve and i've are forty and i've are forty
6ve."
That is CORRECT, madam. he meeklv
adds, and resumes his seat.
Again she tackles the arithmetical
problem. discovers that she has the cor.
rect change, remarks "Oh. yes" smiles
a little smile. dumps the change. closes
the pocketbook, hastily Chances out Of
the window. jumps up with the remark.
"Oh. dear. I'm a block past Maey's,"
pulls one of the hand straps instead OF
the bell strap, aud when some one else
gives the signal for the driver TO atom
she trips lightly out and proceeds L.
make things pleasant for Macy's shop
girls.
UNCLE JOHN.