davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
Full measure.
By Telegraph.
BEECHER.
Some Comments on the Evolution Of
the Bible.

New YORK, Jan. 10-Beecher says: The
bible is an encyclopedia of history, determin-
ing what has been the course of prog
ress down to the present time, and to
pick out here and there an absurdity and
then say: There is your God telling
folks n do 80 and so"-how foolish, how
wicked it is, except as an answer to men that
believe in. plenary and verbal inspiration.
Thousands of things men thought because
they were children. When they became men
they put away childish things Evolution is
going to correct the absurd uses to which that
book has been for many ages condemned The
bible itself is a Most wonderful evolution.
What other book ever was there that it took
probably more than 10000 years to write?
Many peo0le have an idea that certain report
sr5, call prophets, went to SCI God and In er-
viewed him laughter, and that they sat down
and lie told them what to write; and every
thing in the bible, they think, came right from
the lips of God.
The old doctrine of what is called plenary
and verbal inspirahon-that every word in the
bible proceeds fro the mind of God, and that
every statement in the bible is ratified by the
authority of Gods dying out among intelli-
gent men, Mr. Bob mgersolPs whole pivotal
power - tue lacJ tlab among 80 large d null
Der of men there has been an impression that
everything in the bible has been derived from
God. What is the bibley 1t is a complex and
long continuing history of moral elevation
along certain national lines. 1t is
a history; that is what it is. Zap
plausel The period before the legends
that are contained in Genesis is simply i'm
measurable No one knows about it, yet we
know there was preceding existence. We come
down to the time of Moses, and there were
mentary legends of the origin of man. They
were the best statements of the then idea that
prevailed in the east They had certain notions
in respect to the methods of creation; they
were gathered together, not as absolutely true,
but as giving the history of the thought and
the beliefs of men in these earlier periods
They might be true they might be not; but
they were the best that men had
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
Presence Of Mind.
Commodore Phelps.

Commodore Phelps.
1t was related of the First Lieutenant after
ward Commodore, Thomas W. Wyman, that
when the Delaware was thrown on her broad
side, with difficult climbing he succeeded in
reaching the quarterback, where, snatching
the trumpet from the officer in charge, his
first order, given in voice heard distinctly
fore and aft, was: "Keep clear OF the paint
work." This command to hundreds of human
beings packed in the lee scuppers like sardines
in box instantly restored them 10 order, they
naturally feeling that if at such a time, with a
lme-of-battle ship on her @beam ends," clean
patchwork was of paramount importance,
their condition could not be a serious one.
This unsurpassed exhibition of sang-froid on
the part of Leutenant Wyman, preventing
any liability to panic AZ time of imminent
peril, where huge ship Of the line was held
upon her side by furious wind, and with
little prospect of rig ,Ing, deserves to be re-
corded and handel down 10 coming genera
tons as an example worthy Ct imitation by all
seamen when suddenly overwhelmed by ex-
traordinary danger.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
DELAY AND DEFEAT.

slow Progress OF the star Route
Cases---The Government Expecting
Defeat.
WASHINGTON, Jan. 10 The Post contains
what it claims is very reliable information that
the prosecuting attorneys in the star-route
cases expect the government will be defeated
in the pending trial The Post says the coun-
sci for the government have become convinced
that the jury are against them and that Judge
Wyhe has been solicited to make the frequent
illness of Juror Gill an excuse for dismissing
the entire body and making q mistrial of the
proceedings The trial is now in it's seventh
week and but three o. the nineteen routes en-
braced IN the indictment have been inquired
into. Az the present rate of speed it will hang
ON until May, The above positive statements
have caused considerable comment here.
Opinion is divided ON the subject
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
CONGRESSIONAL.
A COlOred Man I'm the Gallery Inter-
rupts the House.


WASHINGTON, Jan. 10 Mr.. Morrill, yesterday
called up his resolution to provide for the ter
mination Of the Hawaiian reciprocity treaty,
and moved its reference to the committee on
finance After debate it was agreed to-ayes
81, nays 20
The senate insisted upon its amendments to
the military academy, consular and naval APP
preparation bills and appointed the commit
tees of conference At 2 O'Clock the presiden-
tial succession bill was taken up as unfinished
business
MIR Edmunds motion to reeommit the presi-
dental succession bill to the committee on
judiciary was lost--ayes 20 nays 80
During the discussion Mr. Logan expressed
the opinion that the majority of people would
vote to extend the presidential term to six
years and make the president ineligible for re-
election, aud said he would vote for this him
self il the question we're presented
Mr.. Blair called up the special order, the bill
to aid in the establishment and temporary sup
port of common schools.
Mr.. Logan said the proposal to distribute the
fund upon the basis of illiteracy was pro-
posal to make certain states pay for the educa-
ton Of the people of other states.
After an executive session, adjourned
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12

n.Icn to Sunday paper, ana s-legrapuou
hence ali over the country, Is peyoi.t.
doubt a hoax of the first magni-
tude. The news editor of The journal
says that the whole story was offered
unworthy the slightest credence The DR..
West to whom is ascribed the discovery is said
to be mythical parsonage, as persistent in
quiry in art circles fails to produce any trace
of him.
WASHINGTON, Jan S-Neither Secretary
Frelinghuysen nor Secretary Chandler have re-
celved information with regard to the alleged
finding of the bodies of the Jeannette's second
c1Itter
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
A Chance for ArizOnians.


Tom Fitch is man of infinite resources
Over in Cochise county they tell an anecdote
about him which possesses a peculiar interest
When his tax suit against the Southern Pacific
railroad was in progress, Tom stoutly advised
the Indictment of Croker for alleged perjury
The ground taken for the Indictment was
Crocker's affidavit that the railroad property
in Cochise county was only worth $4,000
mile. But" urged the foreman of the grand
jury, whats the use of it? We can never con-
vict him" But we can indict him and bring
him here for trial." protested Mr.. Fitch. "But
he'll get clear" replied the foreman; "what
can you accomplish by it?" Tom looked the
foreman squarely in the face, and hitching his
chair little closer to the listening jury, he re-
in Cochise county comfortable for life" That
settled il
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12

gust.
Ida A Harper.
We know just about what they are going to
do before they have walked through their
parts. The actors will stalk about with pain
fully long strides, sit down a la negro minstrel
style, and when lady wishes to leave the
room they will bow deeply and open the
door and kiss her hand as she sails majesti-
cally through; and they will make love in a
high-fown, tragic manner that no girl In
ordinary life would tolerate; and they will rave
about their hearts and their lives and their
honor and roll their eyes and clutch their hair
in way that ceases to be impressive when
one has seen it several hundred times. And
the actresses burst upon our dazzled vision
from the back part of the stage with an air of
maidenly timidity or hoydenish yivacity, as
the character may require, bend one knee and
give a one two, three dancing school curtsy In
acknowledgement of the applause, and COM
mence in deep voice which occasionally grows
thin as the play progresses. The blackened
eyes, the redeemed cheeks, the whitened chin,
the blonde wig-always the same, night
after night, play after play. The girl
with the Ronneiy arms is sure TO have them
bare to the shoulder, and the one with the big
feet weares the shortest dresses. The ges-
lures the poses, the love making, the comedy,
all nodded after the same pattern, and the
scene generally eliminates i'll a faint Now
when woman faints in real life, people gen.
orally rush up, grab her by various parts OF
her anatomy, get her out into the open air and
dash a bucketful of water into her face; but
in the drama the female faints gracefully
away and all the rest strike attitudes around
her, somebody makes thrilling remark, and
the curtain falls.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
Forests of Microscopic Vegetation in
the Human Body.

Youths Companion.
The view has been exclusively adopted that
these microscopic yegetations known as %bac-
terra" are the actual poison that produces
the most infectious diseases Prof Lionel
Beale, F. R. S., knighted for his attainments
in microscopy and medicine, is not prepared
to accept this We present a condensed state
ment of his views
The tongue is constantly covered by whole
forests of bacteria Millions pass into the
stomach whenever we swallow. 1t is the same
with all animals Every vegetable and fruit
and leaf also contains countless numbers. So
does the air we breathe and the water we
drink. All disintegration and decay facilitates
the growth of this minute vegetation
1t is certain now, that bacteria in large guam
titles are constantly passing into the alimen-
tary canal of men and animals without doing
harm. There is probably not part Of the
body of any one of us, one-quarter of an inch
in diameter where their germs are not present
In disease their numbers are vastly-increased
Il have seen, says Prof Beale, @eYery part Of
the stomach, the small and large intesines,
filed with curdled milk which, when placed
under the microscope, seemed to be almost
composed Of bacteria. But this probably did
not originate the disorder, but resulted from
the prior diseased state of the secrehOns. It's
still an open question whether infectious dis
eases originate from some special kind OF
death carrying bacteria, or from particles
wholly independent of all such organisms.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
NUMBER 80.

all visitors 20 his place OF business since their
arrival
The other day q youth from the &rural
deestricts" sauntered into the store, ap-
preached the cage, which is suspended in the
centre of the store by wire, and the follow
ing conversation commenced:
Say, mister, what do you call these birds?S
Mr. True-Australian parrots
Youth-Can they talk?
Mr. True-No.
Youth-Do they sings
Mr. True-No.
Youth-Are they male and femaIsY
Mr.. True-Yes
Youth-Do they breed in this countryf
Mr. True-No.
Youth-Where did you get them?
Mr.. True-In Cleveland.
Youth-How much did they COST
Mr.. True-Ten dollars
Youth-They are little ones amt they3
Mr.. True-Yes
Youth-Ain't they pretty?
Mr.. True-Yes; they are one year old, have
got their growth, and they won't grow any
bigger, and this is their natural size; they are
smaller than big parrot, and some parrots
are larger than these; we keep shot gun I'M
der the counter, and bull dog in the back
room l think this comprises all necessary ins
formation, but if more is needed please apply
through the postofice; for Gods sake, don't
ask questions
Youth-Are you wound up for all day or
only for a trial trip?
Gr. True-Good evening.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
Sinful Connecti.at Sports.

Waterbury Comm American.
A pleasant pastime of sinful boys is as fol-
lows: With needle aud stout thread oat
grains are fastened together, several feet elaps-
ing between each grain Of pair. a few dozen
of these devices are mixed with Straight"
oats, and scattered where pigeons do most con
gregate. The result may be easily imagined
When pigeon gets ready to fly OF he sudden
ly finds that he has an incumberance, and his
involuntary mate wonders what is Juggling at
his crop as it were, as it were instantly. the
whole flock discover that something is wrong
and attempt to fly to other grounds; but the
ENHANCEMENT is so complete that unless every
bird takes exactly the course Of his fellows
progress is impossible. 1t Is then an easy
sinful boys are not backward in improving the
opportunity. n B-This custom was origi-
mated and copyrighted by the Naugatuck boys.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
Cause Of Defective Railroad Appli-
anCes.

broadway Lounger" in New York Tribune
A gentleman in Wall street sends me this
memorandum: @The chief difficulty in the
way of introducing upon our railroads the
most recent improvement in signals, switches,
etc, is the fact that patents for old and defec-
tive appliances are owned in whole or in part by
either the president or superintendent or
other officer of railroad companies. When a
new and palpably good and patent thing for
the protection of life upon railroads is offered
to the president he refers the subject to the
superintendent, who sends an assistant to
make an examination of the new invention,
and ten to one it Will be condemned. not on its
merits, but because one of tLese officers is
interested in less efficient continuance already
in use. Iknew the master machinist of one of
our great railroads, who was himself an
inventor and amassed q fortune BY placing his
own inventions on the roads and Keeping off
ali others, however meritorious. What hope
is there for improvement under this stale of
factsg And why may we not have numberiess
repetitions of Spuyten Duyvil and the tunnel
slaughter for the want of some automatic
means of doing work that is now intrusted to
poorly paid laborers?"
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
CONGRESSIONAL.
Against the Bankrupt Law.-- Bills i'm
the House to Increase Postal Facil-
tiles.
SENATE.

WASHINGTON, Jan. 9.-Yesterday Mr.. Pen
dleton presented memorial OF Cincinnati
merchants against the national bankrupt law.
At the close of the morning hour, the bill to
afford relief to congress and the departments
in investigating claims came up as unfinished
business.
o'clock, when consideration of the presidential
succession bill was resumed.
After lengthy debate and without reach
ing vote, the senate adjourned.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
A Bankrupt City.

EVANSVILLE, Ind, Jan. 10-At meeting of
the city council motion was introduced that
the pay of the city officers be postponed indef-
initely The city is very heavily in debt
brought about by the last city council by reck-
less expenditures. The present council began
the issue of city orders, which are now only
selling at eighty-five cents on the dollar, so
they concluded to discontinue the order system
and postpone payment of the city officers in
definitely 1t is raising quite stir.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
The East Chicago scheme in Cell
IaDSe.

CHICAGO, Jan. 10.
A year ago, the East Chicago Land and I'm
provement company purchased 5000 acres of
land just over the Indiana state line, from
Jacob Forsyth, for 81 100000, paying one-third
of the amount in cash, the plan being to create
a harbor at the mouth of Wolf river and build
a city The second payment has not been met,
and Mr. Forsyth propOses TO foreclose the
mortgage. The company, it is said, will begin
suit against Mr. Forsyth for the recovery of the
$3.50, $50 already paid, on the ground Of mis-
representation.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
THE TELEGRAPH WAR.
The Rival Companies in Conflict ON
the Floor of Congress.

WASHINGTON, Jan. "a very lively contest
will soon be commenced in the rooms of the
house committee on Judiciary, the immediate
cause being bill to punish any telegraph
company that shall neglect or refuse to trans
NIT messages that may come to sucl
company over the lines of rival company
The bill is now in the hands Of sub
committee, consisting of Messrs Payson,
Humphrey and Townshend, and a meeting OF
the committee will be held in few days. A
powerful lobby is here to protect the respec-
tive interests of the Mutual Unio and Western
Union companies The policy of the hitter
company in refusing to receive messages from
the Mutual Union has been the cause of much
complaint especially in the northwest, and has
led to the introduction Of bill which will
bring the Western Union to tine.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12

NEW YORK, Jan 10-Resolutions were pass
ed by the New York Bar association at meet
ing held yesterday, declaring that the code was
unconstitutional, that it abridged the right Of
trial by jury thatit subjected the people of the
state to two conflicting laws-the revised
statutes and the criminal code The resolu-
tons indirectly reflect severely upon Cyrus
Field, who is the special champion of the code
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
The Lady. q. the TIgerl

IS. q. H In The Advance.
Of the many solutions to this complex prob
lem of human nature, may 1 contribute two9
Either the lady or the tiger, Of course. Two
premises must be granted at the start First:
Since the kings daughter and t.s Toz2. ~---
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
ALL Ahout Two Parrots.

Evart Review.
& A few months ago F. A. True conceived the
idea of investing in collection of rare birds,
and procured from bird -fancier Of Cleveland
several species, among the rest two Aus
tralian parrots, which have been admired By
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
,rbe Reflective Camel and the srooIiah

&c. T. l." in Harper's Magazine.
A Reflective Camel, who had laid deeply to
Stomach the teachings Of the Koran, but was
troubled because Of his Inability to compre-
bend the Text about Camel passing with
ease through the eye Of Needle, went to
Moollah and besought the pious man toresolve
the doubts with which he was harassed The
Moollah having been Moollahfed with hand
soma gift to his Shrine, revealed to the in
quirer that in the most ancient Manuscripts
the reference was to Needle passing through
the eye of Camel, and the Animal departed
joyfully, clutching at this last Straw, and a
confirmed supporter of the Revision
MORALE is a Poor Text that can't bemads
70 Read Both Ways.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
RED, WHITE AND BLUE.
And Three Cheers for Mrs. Michael
COrheff.

COrbeft.
New YORK, Jan. 9,-Mrs. Michael Corbett, OF
$40 West Ffty-fourth street, presented three
daughters to her husband few nights since.
Last evening Mrs. Corbett inroduceda reporter
to the babies. The trio were quietly sleeping
in bed at the left of their mother, who was
looking well, and was quite conversational
"The doctor says they are the healthiest and
finest babies he has ever SEEM" she said be-
slowing side glance of admiration and affec-
ton upon the three They weigh six pounds
apieee."l
The husband held lamp over the bed so
that a better view of the infants could be OBJ
tanned. He said: I'VE had to tie ribbons on
their wrists to distinguish them when we had
them christened on Friday morning. The one
with the red ribbon lis Mary Cecilia; the one
with the white is Oatharine Agnes, and the one
with the blue is Ellen Gertrude"
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12

Arkansas One Legged Governor.
LITTLE Rock, Jan. 9-James q Berry, a
one-legged ex-Confederate soldier, was in
augurated governor with imposing ceremonies,
In the presence of large number OF s1ss-
tators.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12

The latest Of the Salvation Army poets:
If you can't get in at the golden gate,
Get over the garden wall
-[Bostou Herald
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
origin Of the Fire Department.

Chicago Journal
Quaint old one-legged Petrus stuyyesant, in
64S, appointed four fire wardens to inspec.
he wooden chimneys of the thatched-roofed
wooden houses of New Amsterdam village
penalty of three guilders, or about s 80. was
demanded for every chimney insufieiently
wept and the money was devoted to a fund
or the importation of leathega buckets and of
LOOKS i and ladders. This was the origin of the
Ire department Of New York
Harper's Bazaar: A German composer was
conducting one Of his overtures. As the horns
played too loud, he told them repeatedly to
play more softly; and more softly they PLAYED
each time At the fourth repetition with
showing wink At each other they put their in
sIrunents 70 their lips but did not blow at all
The conductor nodded approvingIv. sva-v
good indeed! Now one shade softer, and you'll
have it"
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
The Floods.

BERLIN, Jan bismarck has submitted tc
the emperor the draft of bill providing fol-
relief for the sufferers by the floods The die
is expected to pass it Immediately.
WIEsEADEN, Jan. 6.-The Rhine is falling
slowly at Mayence Coblentz and Cologne The
Main and Calm are also falling steadily. The
navigation of the Neckar has reopeaed The
grand duke of Baden has given ESQ for the
relief of the sufferers, and the emperor has
specially ordered everything possible done for
them Wreckage and dead bodies of animals
are drifting down the river
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12
..BunghOIe'' Vinegar Looking Up.

"BunghOIe' Vinegar Looking Up.
New York Sun.
Massachusetts is aroused over the question
Of the relative qualities of bunghole and
whisky vinegar. Bunghole vinegar is so
called because it is made by tie rays of the
sun shining through the bunghoie of a barrel
of cider until the cidel turns to an acetic acid
pleasant to the early New England palate
Whisky vinegar is not the result Of the action
of the balmy rays of the sun on the juice of
the apple, but is, as the name implies, closely
allied to spirit distilled from grain, which in
turn is pleasant to the taste of the later New
Highlander. In 1879 congress passed
law which gave whisky vinegar so
many advantages over its bunghole rival that
the sale of the earlier product steadily de-
creased. Then the owners of orchards and
cider mills organized an association for the
purpose of protecting themselves against
congress. A board of officers was elected and
instructed "to uncover the infamous protec-
ton which congress has wrapped around the
whisky distillers, and to secure for the peo-
pie pure and wholesome bunghOle vinegar
The association has passed resolutions calling
upon the fruit growers of Massachusetts to
have courage. As result, bunghole vinegar
is looking up.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1883-01-12

lovers, the most perfect sympathy exists be-
tween them; glance of one is always truly
interpreted by the other; neither can deceive
the other. Does not the story distinctly say,
she understood her nature?" Secondly:
Being real and sympathizing lovers, the
moral plane of the one is that of the other. If
she be moved by base, unworthy motives, he
too; if she be willing to sacrifice herself to his
good, he is too noble TO accept the sacrifice
Because she is a woman and loves him, she
had rather see him die than become the hus-
band of another Because he Is man, he
would marry anybody rather than die
Now to the question. If the lady yields to
that jealousy which in some women is stronger
than death, and points to the fatal door, he sees
that selfshness has conquered, says to himself,
mot much, madam!" and opens his arms to
receive the rival
If she, in self-abnegation, beckons to the
door behind which sits the lady to her most
hateful her lover, not to be outdone in noble
action, gives himself to the tiger to be eaten.
which, No one can tell, for there are people
and OA0nla