The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1883-05-08
THE BAD BOY.
peek,s snn.

4 I'VE ell, great Juilus IesarS Dalu-
headed ghost! What's the matter
with you?' said the grocery man to
the bad boy, as he came into the
grocery on crutches, with one arm in
sling, one eye blackcned, and a
strip of court plaster across one side
Of his face. "Whcre was the explos-
ion? or, have you been in fight !?
| Or, has your pa been giving you
what you deserve, with aclub? Here,
let me help you. There; sit down on
that chair. Well, by the great guns |!
you look as though you had called
somebody liar. What's the mat
ter!' And the grocery man took the
crutches and stood them up against
the showcase.
20, there's not much the matter
with me-" said the boy, in voice
that sounded all broke up, as he took
a big apple of basket, and began
peeling 1t with his upper front teeth.
IF you think / am wreck, you
ought to see the minister. They had
to carry him home in installments,
the way they buy sewing machines.
I'm all right, but they have got to
stop him up with oakum and tar, be-
fore he will ever hold water again.
"Good gracious! You have not had
fight with the minister, have you?
Well, have said all the time, and |
stick to it, that you would commit a
crime yet, and go TO state prison.
What was the fuss about! z" And the
grocery man laid the hatchet out Of
the boys reach, for fear he would get
excited and kill him.
Oh, it want no fJss. 1t was in the
way of business. You see, the livery
man that was working for promot-
ed me. He let me drive horse to
haul sawdust for bedding, first, and
when he found was real careful, he
let me drive an express-.wagon, 10
haul trunks. Day before yesterday,
think 1t was (ycs, l was in bed all
day Yesterday, day before Yesterday
there was fuernal, and our stable
furnished the outfit. 1t was only a
common elcvcn-dollar funeral, and
they let me go TO drive the horse for
the ministcr--you know, the buggy
that goes ahead of the hearsc. They
gave me an old horse that is thirty
years old, that has not been of of n
I, walk since nine years ago, and they
told me 10 give him loose rein, and
he would go along right. It's the
same old horse that used to pace so
fast on the avenue, years ago, but |
didn't know il. Well, / want TO
blame. just let him walk along as
though he was hauling sawdust, and
gave him loose rein. When we got
off of the pavement the fellow that
drives the h,.agse, he was in II hurry,
cause his iV'Es was going to have
ducks for dinner, and he wanted TO
get back, so he kept driving along
side my buggy, and telling me to hur-
ry up. wouldn't do it, cause the
livery man told me TO walk the horse.
Then the minister, he got nervous,
and said he didn't know as there was
any Use Of going so slow, because he
wanted TO get back in time TO get his
lunch and go to a minister's meeting
in the afternoon, but l told him we
would all get to the cemetery soon
enough if we took it cool, and as for
me / wasn't in no sweat. Then one
of the drivers that was driving the
mourners, he came up and said he
had to get back in time to run a we'd
ding down to the one O'Clock train,
and for me TO pull out little. Ihave
seen enough of disobcying orders,
aud l told him funeral in hand was
worth two weddings in the bush, and
, as far as was concerned this funeral
was going to be conducted in a deco
rous manner, if we didn't get back
till the next day. Well, the minister
J said, in his regular Sunday-school
way, MY little man, let me take hold
of the lines and like darn fool |
gave them to him. He slapped the
old horse on the crupper with the
| lines, and then jerked up, and the old
: horse stuck up his off ears, and then
the hcarse driver told the minister to
pull hard and saw on the bit little,
( and the old horse would wake up.
, The hearse driver used to drive the
old PAGER OH the track, and he knew
what he wanted. The minister took
, off his black kid gloves and put his
: umbrella down between us, and
| pulled his hat down tight on his head,
, and began to pull and saw on the bit
The old cripple began to move along
l sort Of sideways, like hog going to
, war, and the minister pulled some
8 more, and the hearse driver who was
: right behind, he said, SO you could
f hear him clear to Waukesha, Yc-e-
y up and the old horse kept going
5 faster, then the minister thought the
procession was getting too quick,
: and he pulled harder, and yelled
: whoa and that made the old horse
!, worse, and looked through the lit
s tie window in the buggy top, behind,
and the hearse was about two blocks
q behind, and the driver was laughing,
Q and the minister he got pale and said,