The Lincoln County leader. [volume] (White Oaks, Lincoln County, N.M.) 1882-189?, 1883-12-01
TH8 Ban BOY.
Fron PICKS SUN.

"Hcllo ! IIello!" yelled the gro
ccrynan to the bad boy. Ms he
peeked through the window from
the outside to G il any customers
were IN, Come in and let me look
nj those bruises You are carving.
Great heavens, how did YOU get
that italic style on your nose, and
did the same blow blackcn both
cyrsI" and the grocerNinan langh-
ed at the broke up condition Of the
boy.
-. Won laugh If Won want to,
but when you get walked all over
by an intidcl. and have some
teeth knocked down your throat.
YOU won't laugh 50 much" ard The
boy pnuted rs much as he could
with his mouth swelled up, and
looked at the grocer os though he
would like very much to tip the
stove over.
What about an inhdcl You
haven't been fighting with a heath
en- have you Tell me all about it,
because you are on youI last legs,
and confession is good for the soul.
Reveal to me the cause of that
leaning tower of Pisa nose. and
that hic facet colorcd eve" and the
groceryinan wirked slyly at 4 car
pcntcr who came in to fill his to-
bacco box.
"Well YOU sec one of the boys
belonging to our gang OF widow
helpers, his pa is IN intidel, and he
don't believe ANYTHING, but he can
saw more wood for widows than
any OF the boys. He is a good
fellow. only he does not go to Sun
day school, and don't believe there
is any God, or devil, or anything.
lie has made us boys tired more
than siv fines, when we have been
saving wood, talking about things
we believed in that he didn't. He
said the idea that a whale
swallowed Jonah was all bosh, and
Elijah going up in a chariot of fire
was pmppycolic, and everything
was wrong, | went to the deacon
of our church, a regular old hard
shell, and told him about the boy,
and asked him what ought to be
done about it, and he was mad at
the infidel boy, and said he ought
to be scourged, and we should
smite him, and beat him with
many stripes. | asked the deacon
ii it would be right for us good
boys to pile on to the infdel boy,
and make him believe things, if
> we had to choke them down him,
and he said it would be doing a
service to humanity. and would
win for us everlasting fame and
glory. Well here's your glory.
Gaze on my l~eft-handed nose and
you can see tho fame. tell you,
| don't take no more jobs convert
ing infidels. | want to do every
thing that is right, but hereafter,
If an inidel meets me on the side
walk. | shall 60 across the street
and let him have the whole side
walk. You see, we got the intidel
boy up in the hay NOW Of the barn
and while the bows were talking to
him l slipped a clothes line around
his legs and tied them, and then
tied his arms. and we had him so
tight he couldn't wiggle. lie tried
to get away, but he couldn't and
then | commenced on him about
Adam and Eve eating the apples.
At first he wouldn't believe any
thing, but | checked him until he
admitted that the devil got them
into the scrape. Then | asked
him if he believed that the Lord
cut a spare rib out of Adam and
took lot of dust and puttied it up
and made Eve. and set her up in
: sun to dry. The darned inf
del kicked on that and said he
never would believe it, but | sat
down on his stomach and
tickled his nose with a straw and
finally he caved, and said he be-
lieved it, but he was mad, an tried
to the clothes line around his arms
to get away, but we held him tight.
Then | tackled him on the chill
dren of Israel walking through the
c without getting their feet wet
or catching cold, and he SAID that
was a blasted lie. gave him two
minutes to believe that, and when
the time had expired he SAID he
couldn't swallow it, so ] took hold
ofhis ears and tried to pin them
together at the back OF his head,
and finally he weakened and said
the story did begin to look reason
. able, and he believed it. We were
- oIouo snlendidiv and |