Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1884, 1883-08-10
WEATHER BULLETIN.

C.CRAMER
Sergeant Signal Corps. U. $. A.
NEWS COMMENTS.
A NEW railway across the state of Iowa is pro-
jected.
The Cleveland nine is ahead in the league
contest.
The new hired girl has invented new dish
the which it is boiled cucumber.
A MISS ELLA GREEN gets $1,800 salary as
. commercial traveller for st. Louis jobbing
house.
IT is asserted that the railway companies are
considering proposition close all local ticket
offices on the Sabbath.
WHEN Prince Bismarck signed the edict against
American pork he wa heard to mutter, "You
can't make silk purse out of your sows here"
JAY GOULD is credited with saying that the
worst features of the teegraphers strike are yet
to come. What sort of job is Jay putting up
now?
'swEEr simpl city" is the height ofstyle among
the first families-those of birth and breeding
who are stopping at the chief summer resorts
this season.
A WEALTHY and eccentric young southerner
named James Marion Roche has rescued from
poverty N. w. Crouch, the author of "Kathleen
Mavourneen"
CALIFORNIA vineyards are being devasted by
new style, double action, ,non-reveraible beetle.
1t is black, hard shelled nearly an inch long and
gets in its work at night only.
SHE ssng II want to be an angel" and he
swore she was one already. To this she blush
ingly demurred. Then he married her. De-
murrer rsustained.-Saturday Night.
The majestic march Of civilization-the orig
inal tramp-csnnot be stayed; Pierre is to have
variety show at last, form of amusement
the boys have been a-hungered for, 10! these
many days.
IMPERIAL. Caesar, dad and turned to clay,
May stop hole to keep the wind away"
The Bay state pauper, dead and deftly skinned.
May help an nalmshouse-keeper to raise the wind
Detroit Free Press. .
AFTER all the cholera is not so ruthless as it
has been depicted. 1t shows unusual consider
alton in keeping away from this country, as if
in pity, of what we shall have to suffer from
that more fearful scourge-Oscar Wilde.
WILLIAM KILLER, earl of Onslow, noted
English swell, who belongs to ''thc Prince of
Wales set," is in America and will visit WASH
inqton later in the season. He travels with
three valets and thirteen trunks full of clothes.
WHEN Newark preacher wants money he
pawns his gold watch and then on the following
Sunday presches sermon four hours long be-
cause he has no time-piece to 60 by. The next
morning his congregation gets his watch out Of
pawn and sends it to him.
LEADv1L1E parsons are too particular. One of
them was to ohiciate at funeral the other day,
and when the master of ceremonies notified hlm
to begin by saying: "Now, old boss, it is your
play,' the reverend tainted. Now they are
calling him divinity dude.
ApRoPos of Oscar Wildes purposed appear
ance on the stage, the Rochester Post-Express
savs: cat that wouldn't gladly die for the
privilege of having its dead body thrown at
Oscar Wilde as "Romeo" must have very poor
comprehension of the beauties of Shakespeare.
The watering places along the New England
coast have not been we'll patronized this season,
because of the extremely cold east winds that
have blown constantly all summer. Mount
Desert has been especially chilly, and the fogs
have laid the foundations for numerous neu-
ralgias and rheumatisms the coming winter.
The editor of the Brule Index is hard up for
"wittles," and anxlously implores his country
supporters to contribute to the support of his
family by bringing in pumpkins on subscrip-
tion. "Watermelons will do just as we'll, if you
haven't the pumpkins to spare - is the plaintive
close of his appeal. 1t is to be hoped that the
Hatulency which watermelons are apt to produce
will not manifest itself in the paper.
IT is now that the angler goes out with the
dawn.
With habilaments wrinkled and sadly forlorn,
And with wrinkled-er visage and garments for
lorner, ..--..
He sneaks in at eve round some desolate corner,
All fshless and cashless and brimming with
beer, ...
And with lies enough also to last through the
year. .----.--s-
E IT is not the "ton" among the exclusives at
Saratoga this year to wear diamonds except
with full dress. They say they leave all that to
cheap clothing people and the wives Of gamblers
and horse jockeys Washington Sunday Herald.
The same fashion prevails in this Office. We
invariably leave onr diamonds at home in re-
oueptaole provided for them in the immense
q d chilled steel, gold mounted, pearl inlaid vault
which protects the rest Of the family treasures.