The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-04-26
Cbisflfs.

Nee gsdl u issehslef Cat The sieIss
o. i ihf4s establishments are sorisd y,
cast pFsss
"a New Yorker la. been haed 800 fc'
eriEs tobacco 20 giraffe IN Cenirsl Park
TAai. usLi. give ietscco 10 boys ~ nBci
- you iite. iui dost uy 10 poisoa oH'
giraffe
--ssrsssi large bsesery ssd disiillsr,
frn1 have Jailed sssos The beginning ol
she yesr Mbea a bfessry cant msks
Dosey tAs times may he regarded - pSti
~ hatl
--N Ma. said = Aes York belle, ~ho bad
last returned ffona . tour 10 Earopn add
Eppl $50. Sidu't 20 10 the Rcd sea.
bed, yea Asos, doesn't agree ~iih ny
complexion.
An srchange ieils ns thai . certain
actor "silli carries bis hand IN . sliag.
There's where he differs from The rest Of
the profession. who geaenaliy carry aslibs
IN their hand.
When man Is dismissed from EN-.
ploymsu, as always has great deal 10 ssy
sgaias, his employers man. IN fact. Is
l.Is saD. lie makes great noise when
be Il discharged
Why ceriaialy. Ezra, certainly. Any
body can aasscr little question like that
They are called "end mcn" because they
sfe ,hc last uaea The ~andering Joke reach.
es in It's earthly pilgrimage.
a M. Marien ssys: ~ should not be
ssrprised 10 SEQ Bn.lor President OF the
uniiei States Perhaps not but Just
think. Mr.. Marden. how astonishcd the
other hiy millions Of our Inhabitants
would bc.
- kno~ why there is no rest for tbs
wicked. said tho bad boy rs he slid into
q sesl al the second table after the minis
Ter and the other guests had departed.
ut. because the good people took oil
there was.
Up TO the present time the ground
hog ls llis most successful weather proph'
ct Of the year The goose bone ranks sec
Dad, aud II is nip aud tuck between Ven
nor, Virgins aud the muskrat for the
third place
They tell Of Nebraska man who com.
mit,od suicide because he couldn't pay a
debt lac owed his wife, and, OF course she
had 10 keep talking about 1t, but he
should have failed aud settled with her
for three cents.
THE present, says young poetess,
lis like the shore OF the sea Our foot.
steps leave their tiny mark, aud then the
gres, ocean Of Oblivion washes them out
Do yon hail from Chicago, sissy? lfso. we
bet on the footstep.
$50 You mean TO tell me, she said
pleadlnely. THAT you wouldn't give H.
~ dollar Lii for this beautiful duck
Of bonuetf II do just that, decidedly,
be replied. "Why SOP because the
fifty.dollar bin is the biggest
The definition OF "gentlemsn' is Civ.
en- as. 20 human being combining wom-
ans tenderness with a mans courage.
THIS is new to us. We have always un.
derstood the term, gentleman to mean
"a travelling salesman with plug hat"
IL Chinese peddler Ia Oregon refused
toAoccp, an English shilling, saying mo
good Me heap sabe--no chicken on him.
Tue Oreybaiaa is OF the opinion that when
heaihvn Chinee calls our glorious bird
OF freedom . chicken II ia time, indeed,
for him to go.
An agricultural paper asserts that
there is more nutriment in straw than is
generally supposed" Now we know why
some men put straws in tumbler filled
with some peculiar looking stun. We've
seen them through the window Of saloon
as We passed by on the other side.
MIR. Samuelson is known TO he very
parsimonions lie remarked TO Mr. Fog
arty: "The rats are very bad IN Austin.
They are trying TO gn,w hole into my
pantry, What shall do to circumveni
them ''s,arve them by leaving ilr
doc, Of your pantry open at night
do You really believe that an ass ov-
or spoke TO Balaamg' queried q man who
priied himself on his intellect, Col =
idse. 10 whom the question was put re-.
Piled Friend. have no doubt whatsset
tha, the story Is true. have been spol
en- 10 10 The same way myself The man
Of the ipquinng mind retired for medil
iion.
"A gentleman, while bathins ut See,
say his lawyer rise up 81 bis side after
long dive. After exchanging salutations.
says he by the way. sbcnt Gunterf'
"Hs is 10 jail. replied the lawyer, and
dived again. The gentleman thought NJ
mere Of Il. hn, on getting his account lie
found. TO consultation at sea. about tie
Incarceration u Gunter. 81.
Mark Twain failed TO answer q letter
~rares 10 him by Sergeant BsllsntineL
After waiting reasonable time, the latter |
was 40 exaspers,ed At not receiving an an
swer that be mailed Twain . sheet Of pap |
or aud stamp as gentle reminder. Mr.
Clemens wrote back on a postal. Paper
and stamp received; please send an en-.
,rlope."
Il rcrivslist preacher In Canada dre~
gresi crowd by advertising. collection
Of The most notorious sinners 10 the
world. The people all went. expecting to
sce Oscar Wilde and Lydia pinkhsm ami
Ben Butler and aIos OF other iniquiiiss.