The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1883-05-23
THE BAD BOY.

!. II guess your pas losses in tn
silver mine has made him crazy
hain't they ?" said the grocery maj
, to the bad boy, as he come in th
store with his eye winkers SINCE,
of, and powder marks on his face
, and began to play on the harmoni
ca, as he sat down ON the end of
stick of stove wood, and balancet
himself.
'Oh, / guess not He has hedged
He got in with q deacon of anothe
church, and sold some of mis- stool
to him, and pa says if / will keel
|, my mouth shut he will unload th,
whole of it, if the churches holt
out.
"But what was he skipping VI
stairs for the other night with hi
hat of, grabbing at his coat tails Al
though they were on fire? Though
l never saw pussy man run any
faster. And what was the celebra
ton down on your street about thai
time? thought the world was com
ing to an end,; and the grocery mar
kept away from the boy, for fear h,
would explode.
20, that was only Fenian scare
Nothin' serious. You see pa is s
sort of half Englishman. He claim.
to be an American citizen, when he
wants Office, but when they tall
about q draft he claims to be sub
lject of Great Britain, be says they
can't touch him. Pa is smart
man, and DON'T you forgetit. There
don't any get ahead of pa, much
Well, pa has said a good deal about
the wicked Fenians, and that they
ought to be pulled, and all that, and
when l read the story in the papers
about the explosion in the British
Parliament pa was hot. He said the
Irish was Running the whole world
He didn't dare say it at the table
our hired girl would have knocked
him silly with spoonful OF mashed
potatoes, cause she is an irish girl
and she can lick any Englishman in
this town. Pa said there ought to
have been somebody there to haye
taken that bomb up and throwed il
in the sewer before itexploded. He
said if he ever should see bomb be
would grab it right up and throw il
away where it wouldn't hurt any
body. Pa has me read the papers to
him nights, cause his eyes have got
splinters in 'en, and after had read
all there was in the paper / made up
a lot more and pretended to read it
about how it.was rumored that the
Fenians here in Milwaukee were 60
ing to place dynamite bombs al
every house where an Englishman
lived, and at a given signal blow
them all up. Palooked pale around
the gills, but he said he wasn't scar
ed. Pa and ma were going to call
on a deacon that night, that has lots
of money in the bank, to see if he
didn't want to invest in dead sure
paying silver mine, and me and my
ichum concluded % Elve them q send
off. We got my big black iniy rub
Der football, and painted "Diny-
might" in big white letters on it, and
tied piece Of tarred rope to it for a
fuse, and got q big fire cracker, one
of these old fourth of July horse
scarers, and a basket full of broken
glass. We put the football in front
of the step, and lit the tarred rope,
and got under the step with the fire
crackers and basket. where they go
down into the basement. Pa and
ma come out the front door, and
down the steps, and pa saw the foot
ball, and burning fuse, and he said
"Great God, Hammer, we are blowed
up" and he started to run; and ma
she stopped to look att. Just as pa
started to run l touched off the fire
cracker, and my chum arranged it to
pour out the broken glass on the
brick pavement Just as the firecrack-
er went of. Well everything went
just as we expected, except ma. She
had examined the football, and con-
cluded it was not dangerous, and
was just giving it kick as the FIRE
cracker went of and the glass fell,
and the firecracker was so near her
that it scared her, and when pa look
ed around ma was flying across the
sidewalk, and pa heard the noise
and he thought the house was blown
to atoms. o. you'd a died to see
him 60 around the corner, You
could play crokay on his coat-tail,
and his face was as pale as mas
when she goes to a party. But ma
didn't scare much. As quick as she
stopped against the hitching post
she knew it was us boys, and she
came down there, and maybe she
didn't maui me. l cried and tried
to gain her sympathy by telling her
the firecracker went off beforeit was
due, and burned my eyebrows off
but she didn't let up until | promis.
ed to go and find pa. / tell you, my
mann ought to be engaged by the
British government to hunt out
the dynamite fiends. She would
corral them in two minutes. Il
pa had as much sand as ma has
got, it would be warm weather foI
me. Well, me and my chum
went and headed pa off or / guess
he would be running yet. We goi
him up by the lake shore, and hs
wanted to know if the house fell
down. He said he would leave it "
me if he ever said anything against
the Fenians, and / told him he had
always claimed that the Fenianf
were the incest men in the world
and it seemed to relieve him very
much. When he got home and
found the house there he was tickled
and when ma called him an. old bald
headed cowyard, and said it was on
ly . joke Of the boys With . football
he laughed right ont, and said b,
knew Il all the time, and be ran 4
Isee if ma would be scared. And
then he wanted to hug me, but j
wasn't my night to hug and I wen
j down to tho theater. Pa dom
amount to much when there i
trouble. The time ma had then