Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1883-07-20

materially increased his chances of
finding it, passed for seer.
One fine day Squire Ormsby learn
ed to his dismay that his pantry had
been broken into, and a mass of val
liable plate taken. Mr.. Ormsby was
much distressed, not only on account
of the value but the length of time
certain pieces had been in his family.
He distrusted the police and publicity
in these cases, and his wife prevailed
on him to send for Patrick O'Raffer-
ty.
That worthy came and heard the
story. He looked at the lady and gen
tleman, and his self-deception began
to ooze out of him. To humbug his
humble neigbbors was not difficult or
dangerous, but to deceive and then
undeceive and disappoint his landlord
was quite another matter.
He put on humility, and said this
was matter beyond him entirely.
Then the Squire was angry, and said
bitterly, No doubt he would rather
oblige his neighbors, or shopkeeper
who was a stranger to him, than the
man whose land had fed him and his
for fifty years" He was proceeding
in the same strain when poor Pat,
with that dismal whine the merry
soul was soul was subject to occasion
ally, implored him not to murder him
entirely with hard words he would
do his best
mo man can do more" said Mr..
Ormsby. Now how will you pro
coed? Gan we render you any assist
ancel'
Patrick said, humbly and in a down
cast way, he would like to see the
place where the thieves got in.
He was taken to the pantry window
and examined it inside and out, and
all the servants peeped at him.
What next?' asked the Squire.
Then Patrick inwardly resolved
to get a good dinner out of this
business, however humiliating the
end of it might be. Sorr, :"
said he, yell have to give me a room
all to myself, and rump-stick and
onions; and after that your servants
must bring me three pipes and three
pints of home brewed ale. Brewers
ale hasn't the same spiritual effect on
a seer's mind.
The order was given, and set the
s1itchen on fire with curiosity. Some
disbelieved his powers, but more be
lieved them, and cited the jewelers.
business and other examples.
When the first pipe were to go to
him a discussion took place between
the magnates of the kitchen who
should take it up. AT last the butler
and the housekeeper insisted on the
footman taking it. Accordingly he
did so.
Meantime Patrick sat in state digest
ing the good food. He began to feel
a physical complacency, and to defy
the future; he only regretted that he
had confined his demand to one din
ner and three pots. To him in this
frame of mind entered the footman
with pipe and pint of ale as clear as
Madeira,
Says Patrick, looking at the pipe
This is the first of 'em"
The footman put the things down
rather hurriedly and vanished.
"Humph,' said Pat to himself,
you don't seem to care for my COM
pany'
He slipped and smoked, and hismind
worked.
The footman went to the butler with
a scared face, and said, Il won't go
near him again; he said | was one.
NONSENSE said the butler: I'll
take up the next
He did SO. Patrick gazed in his face,
took the pipe, and said, soto voice.
This is the second;' then. very re
gretfully, Only one more to come.
The butler went away much discom-
posed. and told the housekeeper.
Il can't believe it, said she. Any
way, I'll know the worst"
SO in due course she took up the third
pint and made propitiatory smiles.
This is the last of EN-, said Pat
rick, solemnly, and looked at the
glass.
The housekeeper went down all in
Il futter 1--WE are found out, we are
ruined" said she. There IS nothing
to be done now but. Yes, there
is; we must buy him, or put the
comcther on him before he sees the
master
Patrick was half doing over his
last pipe when he heard rustic and a
connection, and 10. three culsritS on
their knees to him. With that in
stinctivc sagacity which was his one
real gift-so he moderated it-he said,
with II twinkling eye:
Och, thin, you've come To make a
clanc brist of it, the three Chrischin
~, nnl l,nyrf hnn thnf
are. We may save yourselves the
throuble Sure | know all about it. :
I'VE see you do Y'are wiser than
solomon, y said the housekeeper. But
sure We wouldn't abuse your wisdom
to ruin three poor bodies like us?'
Poor" cried Patrick rs it poor
We call yourselves? Ye ate and drink
like fighting cocks; ware clothed in
silk and plush and broadcloth, and
your wages is all probationary and
pin-money. Yet We must rob the
man that feeds and clothes ye."
1t is true. it is true" cried the
butler.
He spakes like Il priest said the
on us: it is all the devils doings; he
timpted us. Oh. oh! OH"
"Whisht, now, and spake sinse, p"
said Patrick, roughly Is it melted"
1T is not.
Can you lay hands on it,"
I'VE can, every silver of it. We
intinded to put it back.
"7hdfs a lie, said Patrick, firmly,
but not in the least reproachfully.
Nov look at me, the phole clan of
We. male and faymale Which would
you rather do-help me find the
gimeracks, every article of EN- or be
Jagged and scragged and streatched
on a gibbet and such like iligant div
arsions!"
They snatched eagerly at the plank
of safety out to them. and from that
minute acted under Mr. O'Ratferty' 5
orders.
Fetch me another pint" was his
first behest.
"Ay, dozen, if yell do us the
honor to drink it.
To the divil wild your blarney
Now tell the master I'm at his sar-
vice"
''Oh, murder, what will become of
us. Would you tell him, after all"
''Ye omadhauns. can't We listen at
the dure and hear what tell him!"
With this understanding Squire
Ormsby was ushered in all expectation.
Yer honor, said Patrick, 4 think
the power is LAYING me. | am only