Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1883-02-02
WHY DUMMY swORE OFF.

WHY QUlNIBY swORE OFF.
Jack Quimby awoke with bad head
ache. This was no new sensation to
MIR. Quimby. 1t was old rs the eternal
hills, for Jack was bibulous soul, and
his head was not proportionate to his
inclination for strong waters. He loved
drink, not for its own sake, but for the
mad merriment the bowl provoked, the
song, the rest, and the anecdote, the
maudlin fraternal embrace, and the
pledges of everlasting friendship. He
occupied responsible position in
Front street o ce--for DESPITE his deep
nd'insatiable thirst, Quimby was an
excellent man of business.
.I look" said Mr.. Uuimby. as he rue
fully surveyed his crimson countenance
in a ahand-glass- Il look like billed owl.
Or the last run of shad. Or the break
ing up of hard winter. This won't
do; I'll have to swear off, or the cold
and silent grave will soon claim this
manly form for its own," and Jacks
eyes suffused with tears, for the fumes
of the last round of night-caps were by
no means dissipated
There never was better Christian
he continued. and then. as his eyes lit
on a bottle on the bureau. he said, with
n deep sigh of gIatitude: THANK
Heaven, there is n snilter to brace up
on.'
Mr.. Quimby's toilet was slow and
painful this morning. He looked Mt the
worked h mselfup to the washing point.
II tn all Iar
buttoned, he dared not shave, though
day, and he marked with groan that a
new pimple had taken its place on his
forehead.
.Clearly," said Cuimby, al must
swear of. There are only five days left
of December. Then the new year and
piety," and much consoled by the self
make feeble apology for breakfast.
himself again. 1t had taken much arti-
but Mr.. Quimby played the good
eral cheerfulness. "A hair of the dog, >
was one of his most cherished maxims.
The trouble was that he began with the
htii, anu usually eohSiuuou Will Vhe
whole hide.
"If," he often remarked to his con-
fidants, al could keep cold sober for
twenty-four hours together. l do not
think / wo Id find much trouble in
swearing off, And then he'd recite
1.-The Vagabonds with tears stream
ing down his cheeks, and dwell with in
finite pathos ON the lines:
Synu should have spen thase classic feot-
You need not scoff, sir. was not then
Such n burning libel upon Gods creatures
Twas one of your handsome men,"
Despite his potations he was. hand
some, and the burning libel part Of the
poem, SO far as he was concerned, was
purely imaginary.
Two young and pretty girls aat in a
handsome mansion on California street.
1t was not Mob Hill. but near enough
to breathe the aristocratic atmosphere
of that locality. One, blonde. was
making mouchoir case for New
Years present. And on the lid her
fair fingers were embroidering the
initials j. q.
~ cannot imagine how you endure
that fellow, Al ce," said the other.
"He never comes near me without re-
mnding me of a spice factory. Why,
he must exist on cloves, and cinnamon.
and that sort of thing. / am sure he
drinks. l have heard him talk SC
strangely, and one night he began d
song, and burst out crying in the mid.
die of it. Bob had to take him into
the hall. He could hardly walk. Bob
Il, said it was his emotions, but am sure
it was whisky, or some horrid drink. z"
Nonsense" said Alice Benton.
Jack is so finely str ng that the least
thing affects him. Jack is dear fel-
low, is Jack. So good-hearted and
clever. They adore him at the club"
"Perhaps so.' rejoined her friend
"lut it must take fortune to keep
him in cloves. By-by / must get
down town TO match that lace And
with one of those natty little love-you-
-youI-mother kisses that girls ex.
change. Ressic Morris skipped away.
Alice put another stitch in the curl oi
the j, and examined il critically. Their
she sighed. put her work aside, and fel
into fit OF detected musing. "Jacl
does drink horribly" she said; II wisl
was not SO fond of him" Then, re
pentantly, her woman's loyalty assert
ing itself: THAT Is. l mean l wish
could cure him. Yet he has SO Otter
promised me to swear of, as he calls il
but fear swear Off and swear on ar
all the same TO poor Jack. ] am run
ming fearful risk, they tell me, Il
marrying him. But what can dop
can not give him up. | would not If
could. And j can not reform him..
And Alice. in true feminine fashion. be
gan to cry.
fH1Tears. idle tears, 1 know not whi
ye mean." cried merry voice in he
ear, and tall. manly young fello'
caught away her hands, and laughe
heartily at her look of distress. "Ho'
now. scoz.u he said soothingly. whl
has gone wrongp Are there IL be n
calls this year? Does tho stern rap
legislaie that the basket shall be hun
on the outer wall and no beau allowe
10 taste our cake and wineP Outwith Il
Tell ms all, and by yonder drowsy p,
liceman on the corner, swear to rigl
our wrongo.n
"Oh, Charley said his cousin, ait
MI abput Jnsts' Ysu know bis lrrvgul'