The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1883-10-06
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

Boston girls never giggle. They
merely express their delight by a
dreamy, far-away, north-pole smile
Chicago Times.
Northumberland James made
application for the first of the new
postal notes, but General
Gresham got it.-M. Y. Sun.
You must be quarrelsome fell
low" said phrenologist to man
whose bump he was examining. "Say
that again and I'll knock you down."
was the response.-N Y. NeaOS.
"A Southern gentleman has trained
His premises are free from mice and
the snakes are family pets, taking food
from the hand fearlessly.-DetrOH
Post.
--'Ma, is Mr.. Thompson respecta-
ble?" Certainly, my child. Why do
you ask that question:" Because he
wears such poor clothes" You should
not Judge persons by their clothes; none
but silly people do that" Then every
body's silly-ain THEY ma" -Hdrper's
BdzGr.
AT the close of a missionary ser
mon preached in a country parish, the
whole audience was affected to tears,
except one peasant. On being asked
why he was not affected like the others,
he explained that it was because he
was only a visitor and he did not be-
long to that parish at all.-BaptiSt
Weekly.
"A Concord school philosopher has
shown that "reality signifies existence
in and for the world of phenomena
while actuality is reality, plus POSSIBLE
ity of potentiality." That's plain
enough now. These Concord philoso-
pliers are pretty smart, but we don't
believe they can tell the age of dough
nut from the corrugated appearance of
its back. -Norristo,0n Herald.
Young George Vanderbilt, fourth
son of the millionaire, wants to be
newspaper reporter There it crops
out again-the natural, educated and
hereditary greed for gold; the insatia-
BILE thirst for wealth, the passion for
amassing millions by the easiest and
quickest methods, and reaching fabu-
lous competence by the shortest ways.
It's family trait. -BurIington Ha'ok-
eye.
Over the sundering sea, whose wind-bown
Sweeps backward to his home fond adieU,
Comes tall stranger; once by much inc
first
Esthete in England. Though the hair is cur
Round his mild face, even the stern shamP0Q
viii not wear out the brains that yet remain
In former times our voice must pierce pe'
neatH
Locks that hung thick as the white winter
fleece
Ere we could guess what treasure there lay
hid.
IL brought my aunt inter the city
to-day to show 'er round" said rustic
to Boston police officer, land she's
got kinder tired walkin', so | wanter
find some place where she kin sit down
an rest bit an have bite of suthlng
to eat Kin yer direct me ter any placer
Certainly" responded the representa-
tive of Boston's aesthetic and literary
police force. "What you want is resi-
your aunt. Go right into that eating
saloon" The pair went in.-BoStOH
Transcript.
Mr.. Brown took home a splendid
doll one day for his little daughter. IL
was provided with that wonderful piece
OF mechanism which enabled it, on be-
ing squeezed, to emit the squeaklng
sound supposed to initiate the human
voice, so dear to childhood. That same
evening the little puss was sitting on
her fathers knee, and several times
pressed her small fist upon her parents
shirt front. Producing no effect. she
looked up in the paternal face saving;
Papa. Eyes. What is it, my child;
he replied. "Why don't you squeak
papa"-Harper'S Bayar.