St. Landry democrat., 1883-09-29

mef and winter, IN season anu OUT OF
season, he marches up to the clerk S
desk, with his inseparable bundle OF
papers, and courteously asks in highly
Germanized English:
..Mr. Clerk, hat you put mine case on
the calendar to-day?''
p s.No, Mr.. Heintzlemann, the clerk
invariably replies, ut is not on to-
day.
sWhy hat you not?' he asks, greatly
surprised.
1--WE hadn't room for it to-day"
"Can see the Chudge?"
s.No, he's busy
ssThen,n he continues, 'scan my mo-
ton make to-day?''
"No, it is not motion day..
"That makes no different, says
Mr.. Heintzlemann, with wave OF the
hand Until my case is decided there |
is no court, no Chudge, no anything.
This formula gone through he turns
to the officer in charge, gravely selects
a paper from the bundle, hands it over
with the strict injunction that it be car
ried Immediately to the Judge, and,
tremendously saluting all present, de-
4 parts in the confident assurance that
the morrow will find his case on the cal
endar, and the court in readiness to pro-
coed with the argument of his long-de-
layed motion.
The court officers deal very gen
tly with Mr.. Heintzlemann. He
is privileged character. Accus-
toned as they are to making
short work of the army OF cranks who
periodically disturb the peace or OBJ
struct the wheels of justice with their
vagaries, they still have q tender spot
in their hearts for him. and are never
too busy to answer his inquiries respect
ing the momentous suit, or to comfort
| him with the assurance that some day
his much-hoped-for modification will
be granted.
| To Mr.. Heintzlemann's mind, all law,
order, liberty and pMgress ceased when
the obnoxious Judgment was pro-
nounced, and, pending its reversal, all
monarchs reign without title, all courts
sit without authority, and all govern
ment is usurpation-in short, that 1t is
| Anarchy and Old Night come again.
/ He conceives himself to be the incar-
nation Of outraged justice. and, there
fore, the representative head and adj
vocate-general of the human race. He
is firmly convinced that the future his
tory of the world is closely bound up
with the issues of his controversy.
Every passing event has some occult
bearing upon it, and every public ca
1amity or crime is a Necessary corollary
to it. Accordingly, stray references to
contemporaneous occurrences are to be
found scattered through his volumi-
nous papers. Nothing comes amiss to
him. The Electoral Commission, the
Centennial Exposition, the assassina-
lions of the late Gar Of Russia and OF
: President Garfield, the war between Pc
ru and Chill, the Star-Route trials, the
building of the Brooklyn bridge and the
erection of the Bartholdi statue are all
in some way or other connected with his
case, and all find mention in his docu-
mentS.
Nothing pleases him SO much as to
gain the ear of Judge to whom he
may be unknown. If he be so fortunate
as to elude the vigilance of the court
officer, he Immediately pours forth a
: torrent of unmeaning broken English,
: freely interlarded with scraps of Latin
: and other foreign tongues, fully per-
suaded that at last he is making head
: way, and tardy restitution is about to be
: granted. When the officer quietly
I checks him, he makes no objection,
: but instantly leaves the court with his
customary rapid stride. contented to
postpone the presentation OF his case
until more favorable opportunity shall
5 occur.
$ Has the reader any curiosity to see a
specimen of Mr. Heintzlemann's ''docu-
:. ments2'' Let him run his eye over the
: subioined extract and then pronounce
: upon its value as legal pleading:
TAKE NoT1cE.-Upo these proceedings, as
:, the undersigned with the Referee report tn1
; Corporation Counsel and to the District At
torney's so far as it goes and herein alter re-
ferred to as public reply and tbs lefa1 eaa nas
. or public murder and this incurable public
o calamity and curse OF this public offense, Of
> decisis urbi ct orbi vox populi justicia SUM
y quique lex nervus rerum alb 1nlto IN men
d tenn yeritas prevaelebit. For our Standard OF
, orbis terrarum sub hoe lex pro patria liber
d tatis. in rem registered Citizen Titles Subject
e to this modification, as set forth.
n Later on in the same lucid statement
e of grievances he modestly applies
l. For an ordero of $4,000 and $500 for, dis
Y bursements on account, and be held to deilV
= er the Bartholdi Statue of Liberty and afore
!! said Fund and Trust. ETC., etc. to the first par
e ty for operation, and this Declaration OF indie
pendence tendency pro bono p't5ttco.
III He does not confine himself to the
' higher courts in his efforts to obtain re
dress. District courts, police courts, Oh
i even an Assembly investigating Com
q mittee are alike acceptable. Here j!
. an order presented by him to one of thu
+ lower courts, and probably signed BY
:, = the Judge with view of giving him ,
i transient taste Of the pleasures of i'm
r pending victory: