davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
A Chinese Restaurant i'm Paris.

An enterprising Chinaman has re-
Gently opened a restaurant in Paris,
and is now endeavoring to educate the
Western palate to appreciate the subtle
excellences of rotten eggs and birds
nest soup. In order to prepare the
former Injuries in their full perfection,
fresh ducks eggs are covered with
mixture of cinders. chalk, I've, soda.
powdered liquorice-root, and oil, and
are then left for several months, until
their yelks become first grey and final
" black. The darker the yelk the
greater the delicacy. The birds nests
from which the far-famed soup is made
are built by species of swallow that
abounds on the coast of Java. Ceylon
and Borneo, and practically consist OF
a gelatinous substance obtained from
marine plants. The nests are boiled
either in chicken broth or in milk of al
monds; and the result very much re-
sembles vermicelli soup. save that it is
far more costly. The Chinese restau-
rateur also offers his customers smoked
sharks fins, dried cuttle-fish and sailed
rats: but whether he will make . living
by the sale of such toothsome daintieS
as these to the Parisians is more than
doubtful. -S. James Gazette.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
The Oldest Woman in the World.

At Auberine-en-Royans, village in
the Dauphine, situated between Valence
and Grenoble, may be seen an old
woman living in hut in a narrow
street who has reached the extraordi-
nary age of one hundred and twenty
three years. She has no intirmity ex-
cept slight deafness. being in full pos
session Of her mental faculties.
According to her marriage certificate.
she completed in January last her one
hundredth year since marriage She
was a .'cantiniefe" under the First En-
pire, and had two sons killed at the
battles of Friedland and in Spain. She
is supported entirely on the aims gwen
her BY visitors, who go from great dis
tances to see her as an object OF curl
osity, and her neighbors help her to do
her household work
She lives almost exclusively on soup
made with bread, to which is added 8
little wine. and sometimes little
brandy. DR.. Bonnie, who practices in
the neighborhoOd, states that she is
never hi. Her skin is like parchment.
but she is comparatively upright, and
is of scrupulously clean habits.-Londos
Lancet.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
Nursing the Lights.

All down Delaware avenue, on Friday
night, half league of glowing cleo
trio light bowls at the top of half q
league of thirty-five feet poles, sput-
tered, turned from white to crimson
and then sputtered again and turned
from crimson to white. At the same
moment an inquisitive stranger at the
corner of Vine street heard man on
top of the pole in that neighborhood
swear and snap his fingers. The
stranger proceeded to '.tree'' the man
on the pole. Pretty soon he came down.
He was small and wiry and carried a
carpet-bag full of gilded crayons.
''Do the lights sink because you swear
and snap your fingers, or do you swear
and snap your fingers because the lights
sink?" said the stranger.
Il snap my fingers because they are
stung," replied the small man. 1--WE
poor devils of inspectors often have our
fingers badly burned"
"Why is that?''
'.Because if we take hold of the line
wrong in fixing the lamp we get our
fingers stung. Letting 60 quickly, we
frequently open the circuit. Then the
lamps all sink, but before they can go
out we have it closed again. 1t don t
happen often, though, nowadays, but
it's the commonest cause of that sput-
tering in q line of lamps"
"Don't you sometimes get a worse
dose than tinger-burning?"
"Not often. l got a queer shock
once, though. 1 had a line cut and the
circuit was open. / had one end of the
cut line in my hand. The. ladder on
which was standing shook little, and
| threw out one hand and caught hold
of an iron awning post. Just as soon
as / touched it the current was estab-
lished again. and got a shock that
made me see stars"
alt is a wonder that you were not
killed, like the man in New York"
1.-THE man in New York got killed
because he was in a hurry to get through
with his work. He had eight or ten
wires to manage. In cutting loop he
didn't finish with the first of them, and
so got all the power OF sixty-light ma
chine into the last of the wires. After
he cut this last he took both ends in his
hands to Join them. The current, OF
course, passed through his body"
"How often do you climb those poles
in night?" said the stranger, as the
inspector halted at the base of another
pole.
"As many times as 1 can in ten
hours. 1 and my mates are expected to
do it once an hour" and, putting one
foot on the first peg, he began his as
cent. With his back against the pole.
the stranger yawned like the dark gulf
Of the Delaware behind him.
1t seemed that his chatty companion
had fallen in love with some starry
divinity, so long did he stay in the
skies. Clump-a-clump, clump-a-clump
came the Inspectors boots down the
pole at last. Found a soft carbon
up there" he said, as he struck the
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
Why Old Jasper Was Not Sent to the
Penitentiary.

Charged wild habin' two wives. is
I?" asked an old negro of the Magis-
trate before whom he had been ar
raigned.
"Yes," replied the Judge. "Are you
guilty or not guilty?"
"Wall, Wen sorter halter study bout
dem Jacks an 'vestigate 'em leetle.
It's OWN ter what sorter man yer leabs
it ter whuder ur not Use 'siderrd
guilty"
"Have you two living w;ves?'
"What does yer 'spOse l wants wild a
dead wife, Jedge. DOan draw me IN
dis cou' t-house 'spectin' ter find me a
fool. Doan 'sinuate dat de time what !
had spent at night-school had been
flung away"
"Well, old man, if you have two living
wives you have violated the law, and
merit term in the penitentiary."
''Doan git fracshus an denim a man
fore yer knows all de Jacks. Some
time ago 1 married Tidy Smith, a
mighty likely oman. She was
good oman, as 1 tells yer, but one
mawnin' she cussed me. l can stan
anything but bein' cussed. Eff yersei
was ter set up dar an cuss me, l doan
keer who yer is, I'd hit yer sho'. Wall,
when de oman cussed me, I sorter
slapped her down. AFTER dis, she didn't
seem ter Tub me quite so well, case
when / felt bad and wanted ter chunk
her 'roun' fur 'musement, she got outen
my way. Dat want no way ter do, but
she was still good oman. One day
she tuck sick an sent fur her sister
Liza. She KEEP er gittin' wus and wus,
an gunter talk bout dyin'. One ebenln'
she called me an SEE, seq she: Jasper,
Use mighty nigh gone. an can't lib till
mawnin'. 1 knows dat yer can't git
along widout a good wife, an jis as
Use dyin', when Use jis alive, wants
ter see yer married. l knows dat yer'i
always lubed sister Liza, an now ]
axes yer ter mary her. 1 greed ter dis,
merely to crafty de dyin' oman, an
size dat Liza was q mighty likely
gal Wife she KEEP er gittin' wus, an
arter while sent fur de preacher an
de license. Da got dar jis as Tidy
seemed ter be DRAWN her las BRET.
Me an Liza stood by de bed. an when
Tidy CAPPED fur de las time de preach
er married me an Liza. Jis as de
ceremony was formed, Tidy she
hoped outen de bed an says: sOh,
yes, Use got yer now. Hit me de uddel
day, did yer? Now Use got yer, an is
a gwine ter SEN yer ter de penitentiary
fur habin' two wives OATS de way il
wus, Jedge. an I'd like ter know at
dis present writin' whut de law is gwine
ter do about it?''
You have violated the law, old
man, and must suffer the conse-
quences."
"Dat looks mighty hard. 1t do seem
dat de law amt got no respeck fur q
mans private affairs. STAINS aside
an lets two wimin git away wild a
man, an den, stead OBJ shown SYM
pafy, jumps on ter de man. Now,
ledge, doan yersef believe dat any
two wimin can git away wild one po'
man?n
That's a fact" the Judge replied.
Zone woman is bad enough, but two,
ali. Lord! You can go, old man
xArEdusdD Traveller.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
The Mosquito at Close Quarters.

Viewed through the microscope the
mosquito presents picture of mechan-
ical ingenuity as marvellous in execu.
ton as it is devilish in design. In the
bill alone, which seems so fragile to
the unaided sight, there is a combina-
ton of five distinct surgical instru-
ments. These are lance, two meat
saws and suction pump. The fifth
instrument have forgotten, but labor
under the impression that it is porta-
BILE Corliss engine to run the rest of the
factory with. l know that the hum of
the mosquitoes in the cottonwood thick.
cts along the Lower Mississippi remind
ed me constantly of the hum of man
ufacturing village, and several times
walked back several miles looking for a
town before l could convince myself
that the buzzing heard was made by
mosquitoes. with their engines running
to sharpen their saws. When the in
sects operate on man the lance is first
pushed into the flesh, then the two
saws, placed back to back, begin to
work up and down to enlarge the hole.
Then the pump is started and the vic-
TINS blood is syphoned up into the res
ervoir carried behind, and finally, to
complete the cruelty of the perform
ance, the wretch drops a quantity OF
poison into the wound to keep it irritat-
ed.-ForeSt and Stream.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
Found by a Dream.

A remarkable incident was related to
an Avalanche reporter yesterday by DIR.
ID. F. Goodyear, and it smacks so much
of the working of spirits that the story as
told the reporter is given, leaving to all
the readers of the 4Aualdnche the solu.
ton of the mystery as best they can.
The incident is as follows: On Septem.
Der 2 Mr.. Samuel Dreyfus, for many years
Deputy Sheriff in charge of the. Crimi-
nal Court, died at his residence on Elk.
change street in this city OF an affecta-
ton Of the lungs. On the 5th of Sep.
TENDER one of his sons visited DIR. Good.
year and inquired if his father had left
any of his private papers with him, as
it was well known the deceased had
been a member of several benevolent
institutions in Memphis, and look
over those papers found at home re-
vealed but one policy on his life and
that was in the order of the Knights
and Ladies of Honor. 1t was known to
his family and relatives that he had left
policies in other organizations of u SIM
liar order to the amount of $4,000. DIR.
Goodyear. who had teen on intimate
terms with the deceased, did not re.
member of him having left
any papers with him, 1ut to
be certain carefully examined
the contents of his safe, but failed to
find any. MIR. Ben X. Pullen, formerly
Chief Clerk in the Sheriff office, but
now City Register. was also questioned
by the son of the deceased, but he, too,
did not remember of any papers being
left in his care. Three days afterward:
the brother-in-law of the deceased
called on DR.. Goodyear and made the
same statement regarding the missing
policies as had the son. Another search
was made, but it. too, proved fruitless.
Now comes the strange portion of the
story. Yesterday forenoon, so relates
Mr.. Ben X. Pullen, he fell asleep in his
Office and dreamed that Sam Dreyfu:
appeared before him and asked: '.Whai
had become Of his papers, which he had
given him while he was in charge of the
Sheriff Office He answered: They
are safe where l placed them," and
suddenly awakening proceeded at once
to the Sheriff's office, which is on the
floor above, and found the missing
package intact, where he had placed it
many months ago.
The package was without delay
turned over to the family of the de-
ceased. and in it was the missing poll
cies. The well-known character of Mr..
Pullen and DIR. Goodyear is a guarantee
of the truthfulness OF the story related
above.-Memphis (Tenn.) ArdlGnche.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26

sist Of two craD-apple trees which have
stopped hearing.
''Oh! my stars. Mr.. Agent. you don't
s. pose any one would apply for such .
house as that, do you? MOI that it amt
pretty nigh correct, but don't you see
that isl mean-why, it is too long; it
win cost too much to print, don't you
seer We must shorten it. Strike ont all
supertluous words. Here now, this is
much shorter and equally true, for it
says nothing what amt here:
ITO RENT-FOR THE SUMNER, A VILLA;
i additions Of stone, brick and wood; well:
scenery level; sore cheap TO trade in; &1.25
railroad fare to the city; furniture old; fruit
and shade. - ~ = - = ~
There. Mr.. Agent, that is much
shorter, and won't cost half so much as
the other way; but we must tell how
near it is to the city and station, mustn't
we?''
Certainly, if you desire. Let me
see. 1t took me two hours to get here"
"Y as, may be it did; but you came
on rather q slow train, 1 guess. /
s'pose they will be putin on an ex-
press before long to stop only ten times
'twixt here and the city: it's about
time they did, anyhow. Now, about
how fast can an A express run?"
''Some of them 90 q mile minute"
Exactly. Now this station is forty
five miles from the city; that takes
forty-five minutes; put that down.
Now, as to distance from the station.
''It took me half an hour to walk it,"
every likely; but then you're not
used to walking and the roads are pref
ty bad now. About how fast can good
walker go. say Rowell, for instanee?"
II really do not know seven oreight
miles in one hour, perhaps, in good
go-as-you-please race Of that dura-
tion."
"Well. if he can make eight miles in
race, he can make ten If in hurry
to catch train. Ten miles an hour is
mile in six minutes: but, although it's
a good mile from here to the station
there are no fences to climb and the
wind generally blows in that direction,
so put down five minutes to station
that's it. Now, rs your train will be
along in half an hour yon better be
starting. Try to get 800 month for
the summer, but don't lose chance to
rent if you have to take 80. Good
bye, and remember, my friend, that at
all times and under all circumstances
honesty is the best policy "-Rhiia-
delphiG Erening Call. ---r
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26

earth. II had to take it out and put Ia
another, il didn't burn straight.
"Oh, that's what you carry those
gilt-edged slate-pencils for?' was
asked.
Eyes. they're extra carbons. Don't
have much use for them nowadays
though. They make 'em better than
they used to do
.iDo you do this every night?"
"No," was the reply. Every other
week. "I'm a trimmer and work by
day."
"What do you do then?''
81 have to put tour new carbons in
each of twenty-seven lamps, first taking
out the burned ones, and have to clean
the lamps"
Il shouldn't think anybody'd know
whether you'd cleaned 'em or not.
They're so high up" said the stranger.
The inspector looked at the speaker
solemnly and drew something that
looked like a coil of scorched auburn
hair out of his pocket. .
ado you see that?" he said. That
was part of spool of wire in an elec-
trio lamp that cost eight dollars-tho
spool did, see? Well, the rod that held
the carbon in that lamp wasn't cleaned.
So instead of feeding properly-you
know it slips the under carbon down as
it burns-it stuck.
1.-The lightning took short cut
through that spool and burned it like
thread. You see. the lamps are cleaned
for something beside show"
don't those carbons burn out too
quick for you sometimes?" was asked.
IF we catch 'em at it we retire them,
but there an automatic cut-out in these
Maxim lamps that switches the light
from the .burnt-out pair of carbons st
twelve O'Clock each night on to the
other pair. The cartoons retire one
another, You see." H.E.I
"Are you responsible for the wires ~
well as the Lamps" inquired the stran-
ger, as he halted before turning up Chest
nut street.
You can't expect everything for
two dollars and twenty-five cents day,
can yOu?" replied the inspector. mo;
there's regular set of telegraph line.
men for that. They have to watch the
wires, especially at fires, when it's their
uuty III cut tHe cOnuectonS lnto tne
burning buildings and take out their
lamps. Such lamps as the ones in the
Arch Street Opera-House and the Dime
Museum are worth sixty dollars apiece,
and lineman will take a big risk to
save property of that value. Then they
have to uncross the wires when the fire.
men lay their ladders over them. One
OF our linemen sat on top of a telegraph
pole nearly all night at late fire in
Richmond shaking out crosses. Phil
ddeL phia Times.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
Bagasse Paper.

In Mexico, Guatemala and in certain
islands of the Antilles, bagasse is used
rs fuel 1t is true that it forms but
poor substitute for coal, but in those
countries where fuel of all kinds. par
ticularly coal, is expensive, each scrap
of bagasse is carefully preserved. In
this country fuel of all kinds is cheap.
Thus in Louisiana bagasse is seldom or
never used as fuel. II has been not only
utterly worthless to the planter, until
recent period. but was in his way, as
the unsightly heaps of the material ON
the sugar plantations bear testimony.
In fact, during the palmy days of sugar
producing in this State, what to do with
the bagasse was a problem that seri-
ously annoyed many of the planters.
But recent experiments have proven
that the hitherto useless bagasse con-
tains fiber that may be utilized for
paper making. A ton of bagasse will
Weld about six hundred and fifty pounds
of fiber, while every ton OF. the latter
pounds of pulp. A twenty-five horse.
power engine will clean thirty tons Of
bagasse daily, while the latter will fur
nish at least ten tons of fiber. or seven
and half tons of pulp. 1t has been
estimated that each planter who makes
four hundred hogsheads of sugar might
realize no small portion of his yearly
expenses by working his bagasse and ex-
tracing its fiber. A company was
formed in this city about year ago to
make paper out of cane fiber. Their
numerous experiments have satisfac-
torily ascertained that paper of an ex.
cellent quality can be made from that
substance, and that the material is 50
inexpensive that it can be proftably
worked. Certain planters have offered
the company all the bagasse on their
places for from five to ten years gratis.
They hope to see this new industry
started in our State, so they will be able
to sell their bagasse to the factories.
Others propose to extract the fiber them
selves, for, ii once paper factories are
established, it will become marketable
product.-N. o. Tnmes-Demoerat.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
THE FAITHFUL HOUSEWIFE.

I see her in her home content,
The faithful housewife. day by day;
Her duties seem like pleasures sent,
And joy attends her on her way.
She cares not for the loud acclaim
That goes with rank and social strife,
Her wayside home is more than fame;
She Is IFS queen-the faithfufNife.
When summer days are soft and fair.
And oird-songs NIL the cottage trees,
She reaps benson as rare
As her own gentle ministries.
Peace shrines itself upon her face,
And happiness in every look:
Her voice is full of charm and grace,
Like music of the summer brook.
In winter when the days are cold.
And all the landscape dead and bare,
How well she keeps her little fold,
How sh mes the fire beside her chair!
The children go with pride to school.
The fathers toll half turns to play,
so faithful Is her frugal rule,
So tenderly she molds the day. @
Let higher stations vaunt their claim,
Let others sing of rank and birth,
The faithful housewives honest fame
Is linked TO the best Joy on earth.
IN. Y. Ledger.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26

head lightly with the ends Of the fingers
aggravatos pain of this kind. Head:
ache, worse ct night, is also be-
lieyed to be characteristic OF another
form Of meningeal inflammation.
Owing to certain arrangements Of
the kidneys they become unable to per.
form their usual duty, as . result OF
which certain substances remain in the
blood that in health are cast of from
the system. This condition is really Q
blood poisoning and produces an ex-
ceedingly grave form of headache.
Sometimes quite unaccountable head
aches are due to the excessive use OF
tea and coffee. The most general causes
of headache have now been mentioned.
1t is quite possible for more than one OF
these malconditions to affect an individ-
ual at the same time, q circumstance
which, it is fair to infer, might give rise
to unusually frequent and severe head
aches. To make briefly any intelligent
suggestion for the relief of all these de-
rangements Is manifestly impossible.
One thing must Be plain, viz: that any
remedy that is guaranteed to cure every
case of headache must fail sometimes,
and It is probable that all such remedies
do fail oftener than they succeed. In
deed, it is also probable that the tradi-
tional brown paper steepcd in vinegar
and applied to the aching head is just as
useful as many of the reputed ..sure
cures" for headache. A physician who
was something of a joker. and who may
appear a trifie malicious, was in the
habit of ordering for sick headache
three glasses of lukewarm water, to be
swallowed in rapid succession, and to
be followed Immediately by a glass OF
hot mustard water. The effect of this
treatment on such headaches is at times
very beneficial. 1t is also quite astonish-
ing to the Observation-Disclosures
Times, a.. .-
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1883-10-26
RELIGIOUS AND EDUCAr1onAr.

REV. Dr.. j. H. M. Knox, Of Bristol
has been elected President of Lafayette
College, at Easton, Pa.
All the schools of Louisiana have
been closed till next April. The cause
is said to be want Of money.-M O.
Rcayune.
Rev. DIR. Parker Morgan, of the
Church of the Heavenly Rest, in New
York, with $4,000 salary. declines 8
$4,000 call to Chicago.-M y Times.
Dartmouth College is to receive
$4,000 from the estate Of the late
Judge Jason Downer, of Milwaukee,
Wis.,, under the provisions of his will.
Judge Downer was graduated from that
institution in the class Of '3S.-Chicago
Inter Ocean.
ID. L. Moody and his trustees, with
some invited guests, dedicated the fine
brick and stone buildings connected
with his Mount Herman Boys School,
in the town of Gill, Mass, before he
departed for Europe. The buildings
cost S29, 900, and they command one OF
the finest views in the Connecticut Riv.
er Valley.-Boston Journal.
From recently published doeu-
ment it is gathered that there are $3.50
Presbyterian churches in the United
States, showing an increase of 116 as
compared with last year. The number
of ministers Is 5.21S, not including 2S2
licentiates of last year. The contribu-
tions to the funds during last year were
between S9,O00,CO0 and $4,000, OO0.--
Chicago Tribune.
The School Journal advocates the
general establishment of reference libra
ries in the schools. "The State Supers
intendent should select list of books,
and let each district buy from this list
with the money appropriated by the
State. In New York State the S55,OOC
annually wasted on the district libraries
should be spent on reference libraries.
The books should be kept at the school.
house and be under the care of the
teacher; they should be used at
the school. and not loaned out"
Between September /, 1882, and
September 1, 1883. two agents of the
New York Bible Society have distributed,
among the immigrants arriving at Cas-
tie Garden, 53,877 Bibles and Testa-
ments, printed in German, Hungarian
or Scandinavian. No Bible or Tesla
ment is given to an immigrant unless
he or she is able to read the book in the
language in which copy is desired.
During the same period marine agents
have visited 8, 484 vessels and distributed
1878 volumes of the Scriptures.-M
Y. Tribune.