davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
Artemus Wards Boyhood.

Waterford (Me) Cor. New York SUM-
Artemus' father died when the boy was
about Is years old, and as the family cir
cumstances were somewhat limited thereby,
he was apprenticed to Mr.. j. NJ. Rix, who
published The Coos Democrat, ct Lancaster,
n. FL. The stage line to Lancaster ran by
the Brown homestead, and the drivers were
not unfamiliar with the ability of
the future genial Snowman" in the
way OF practical jokes. They knew
how he organized shows, wherein his
fathers red cow, with a coat sleeve stuffed
full Of hay hanging from her nose, served as
the elephant, upon which innocent country
youth were invited to ride, with startling re-
suits. They knew, too, how old Deacon
Hales white horse had been induced to wan
der away for miles following tempting bit
of hay, hung just beyond reach by means of
lath strapped to the horses neck.
There was an endless series of pranks got
ten up by the boy to mystify the villagers in
general, and his mother in particular and all
these were well known to the stage drivers
So when the young humorist started for
Lancaster, eager to know as much as possible
abou5 his future residence, the veteran driver,
Steve Seary, having previously conspired
with the boys in Rix's Office to give young
Brown fitting reception, assured him that
Mr.. Rix was pious man, and that his hands
were, if anything, more pious than he, and
that the sooner the would-be apprentice
crammed on the catechism the better
Charles listened dolefully. It was late at
night when the stage reached Lancaster, and
in the morning young Brown hied himself
to the Office. The 'force" consisted of
journeyman and an apprentice named
Smith. They received him solemnly.
The journeyman handed him a bible
and made him read chapter,
after which he was examined on the cate
chism. His ignorance was commented upon,
but he was permitted to go to work. Atnoon
a similar performance was enacted, while in
tense gloom rested on the Office during the
day. The next morning Charles went to the
Office resolved to run away at the end Of the
week, but, on looking about, failed to find his
fellow-craftsrnen. Further search revealed
them under the garnet stairs too intoxicated
to walk. Young Brown was so angry over
the sell that he wrote note to the driver
threatening vengeance, which was never car
ried out.
Browns fame as q humorist was surprise
to all who knew him, and even to himself. A
grea ser surprise to his kinfolk now is the in
terest still manifested in the dead merry
maker and his work. They thought that all
attention would cease with his life, but every
year the number of people who visit Water
ford to see his mother-now almost 80 years
old-increases
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
DO FASHIONABLE WOMEN SWEAR ?
What Very Daisy of Polite Society
Remarked When Her Train Was
Stepped On at the Opera.

tClara Belle in Cincinnati Enquirer1
She was a tall, willowy creature, so undu-
lous that, getting into a strong draft in the
lobby of the new opera house, she swayed as
though there was nothing sitter than gristle
instead of bonesin her body. Her great brown
eyes were gently lustrous; her nose was softly
plugged, giving the idea that it had been
blunted by contact with the rude, rude
world; her manner was fawn-like in its tim
idity, and her slim hand rested on the arm
of her escort with maidenly fear of such
familiarity with man, and yet with a coy
reliance upon his protecting courage and
honor. The opera was to be "Faust," and
0, how glad felt because the language was
Italian, so that, while her innocent eyes
might be delighted by the sight of poor
Marguerite, her sensitive ears might not be
outraged by the story.
Her elegant costume was simplicity itself,
though costly and beautiful 1t was com
bination of white satin and broche of cream
color in delicate flower designs. The front of
the broche was perfectly plain, finished at
the bottom with a ruche of white lace, traced
with silver threads. There was short front
drapery of broche grenet. The corsage was
cut short on the hips, where it met the tunic
The back had the puff which is now seen in
almost all back draperies. The modestly low
corsage was pointed back and front. A lace
rosette ornamented one shoulder, and a gar
niture of lace coquilles trimmed the edge of
the tunic and corsage The tunic extended
in a long train, as feecy and undulous as a
surf as she dragged it gracefully over the
marble tiling of the lobby ON her way from
carriage to auditorium. Then horrid man
weight 200 pounds, size of foot, ten) stepped
with firmness on that train, and stood still
There was ripping and tearing of fabric
amidst the womanly mysteries of the girls
back drapery, and the shapeiness of the
whole structure collapsed.
What did she say? Well, I was close up to
her, and was probably the only person who
heard her remark.
will give it to you with phonetic exact
ness: ''GoddlemityF' That was the word
Do fashionable women swears you ask
There are awful occasions, like the one I have
described, when they can't help it. At all
other times their ejacularity language is be-
comingly mild. '.Darn it'' is about as strong
as good girls make their profanity. ''Gosh"
is prevalent in our best society just now
"Blawst it" "Beggar me eyes," and elbow
me tight find favor among the feminine
Anglomaniacs; and know Fifth-avenue
heiress who conversationally that is, with
the girls says, "Demn ii" though she would
about as soon bite the tip OF her tongue off
as let out plain, American tsdamn' from
between her cultured lips. Whatever is
English is right. That is the rule with tn
sort of New Workers which she is.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

Gent possible Charles P. johnson. Law has
labored vainly against cards, eee st. Louis,
1883 but enthusiasts continue to abide with
US, as ardent as s'the great Bath player,
Lookup, who expired at his favorite Double
Duemby."
The symbolic kings naturally are not IA
vored upon our democratic shores, and have
been at times replaced through republican
manufacturers, who substituted Washington
for the king of hearts, fifty president of
hearts," Adams of diamonds, Franklin
OF clubs. and Lafayette of spades; the
queens being Venus, Fortune, Ceres and
Minerva. The corresponding knaves were
indian chiefs
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
An antroductton to coIeriage.


casper" in Detroit Free Press.
Il was case of personal introduction.
Everybody knows that many Of the Wall
street boys are given to a free-and-easy man
ner. The broker in the case in question is
probably as free and-easy as any. A friend,
who was one of Lord Coler idge's escort, pre-
scented the broker with the information that
the party of the other part was his lordship,
Chief Justice Coleridge" The broker promptly
took him by the hand and said:
GLOW are you, Cole? Glad to see you"
His lordship's face bore look of surprise
at first, and then a smile, and his hand was
Withdrawn as soon as he could establish full
claim to it. And the broker hurried off to
cover some shorts in New York Central, with
which Mr.. Vanderbilt was just then squeez-
ing the bears
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
THE DECORATED PAsTEBoARDs.
cards OF Hindu or Chinese Origin.
Various styles OF Design and Fig

Various styles OF Design and Fig
ure.
st. Louis Cor. n. o. Times Democrat1
Cards flourish in much narrower circles
to-day than formerly made their kingdom,
when king and beggar alike was slave to
their caprices. Great age belongs to them,
since we read from assertions by Count de
Gebeiin that emblematic Hindu cards and
Chinese paper tickets existed centuries ago.
It is believed the ancient Hindu came Of
Chaturaji, the Four Rajahs, species of
highly complicated chess, was the sandy
foundation upon which SO many pasteboard
castles were reared, to the ultimate ruin Of
the confident contractor.
In the wardrobe accounts Of Edward I,
Plantagenet, born 1889, there is an item Of
money set aside for the use of the monarch
for playing at -Four Kings Just the date at
which card pictures took the place of the
carved figures does lot appear in the looking
up. The Royal Asiatic society was presented,
by high-caste Brahmin, with pack of
Hindustani cards, circular in shape, thou
sand years old, wholly unlike our own, bear
ing symbolic designs, pulling to the modern
curio-student, "a pineapple in a shallow cup"
something like parasol without handle,
with two broken ribs sticking through the
top" 1t is said among the Chinese that
Seun-ho, 1120 A. D., devised the oblong card
for the amusement of his numerous wives
Europe received cards as early, writes
Carelluyzo, as 1879. They s'were brought
into Viterbo, the game at cards, which comes
from the country Of the Saracens and is with
them called naib." The significant fact that
the French clergy were especially forbidden,
by the synod of Langres, the playing of
cards, yields to Us glozing comfort, in spite
OF the tart dissatisfaction expressed concern
ing the sinfulness of the times
In the decoration of cards, the imagery of
the pips, were neatly derived from the hearts,
bells, acorns and leaves. To Italy, be it re-
nernbered, belongs the glory of giving
place aux danes, by supplanting the olden
knight by the queen The heraldic cards of
1000 bore the arms OF the pope, as king of
clubs; those of the king of France, of spades;
Spain, the king of diamonds, and England,
OF hearts. As early as 1920 gambling
was in vogue, for st. Bernardin preached
against it at Bologna, at which time fire
was laid in the public square, and all the
cards were thus destroyed, a proceeding
which must have rendered ecstatic any an
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
FIAT yUsT1FfA.

They tell her he is dead; and, when she hears,
Right instantly she fears
Lest they shall wonder that she sheds NO
tears
And thereat, very sadly, mournerwise,
She droops her great soft eyes
And goes to stand beside him where he lies.
"POor widowed one!" they whisper, for they
see
Her sorrowing mien; but she
Makes passionate inward Inurnur, 81 am
freelp
She hears that he is dead; and, vixen she
hears,
Leap the hot, heavy tears
10 eyes that have not wept for years and
years.
And lol she has forgiven him ell the shane
He wrought upon Ter name,
So biackening it with soilure Of black blame!
Then to his home she hurTies, yearning sore
To look on Mira once more;
But friends, in awful virtue, guard the door!
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
THE BOOKKEEPER.
Journal of Commerce.l

journal of Commerce.l
It was an ancient bookkeeper,
And he was tall and slim;
Though his face was mild, he rarely smiled
His clothes were dark and prim,
And every thing about his desk
He kept exceeding trim.
He always hung his hat and coat
Upon the self-same hooks,
And laid his ruler, pen, and ink
In their respective hooks,
And the only exercise he had
Was footing up his books.
Each day upon the self-same hour
He took his lofty seat,
And bent his body and his mind
His laborS to complete;
And blots were neither on his fame
Nor on his ledger sheet.
The music of his pen was heard
From morn till eventide;
Up columns vast his eyes were cast,
Then down again with pride:
Quite pleased was he though he saw his work
Increased and multiplied.
The cash that DER his fingers came
Each day was something grand,
And yet no schemes to bear it OFF
By him were ever planned,
Although you saw with half an eye
That he wrote sloping hand.
He had no wife, he made no friends,
His joys and cares were few,
And his dearest hope from day to day
Was to keep his balance true.
A good world this if every man
The latter thing would do
He never sighed when little ills
His way of life would cross;
And DER the errors of his youth
He showed no vain remorse;
But set down all that came along
To profit or to loss.
One day the creditor of all
Dropped in for his amount;
He founI the old man at his post,
Though low ran natures fount;
The books were closed and he was borno
Up to his last account.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
A whack at Chicago Editors.
Boston Herald

The able Chicago editor who said that no
man who had been chosen vice president was
ever after elected president had probably
never heard of John Adams or Thomas JEFF
ferson or Martin Van Buren,, for each of
those men was chosen to the presidency after
having held the second Office But it is not
required that a man should know anything
of our political history to edit Chicago pa
per. If he is posted on Carter Harrison and
can abuse st. Louis he viii do.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
Anything for Peace.


eyes," said the clergyman, 81 know the
choir has been doing bad work lately, and its
singing has sounded about as sweet as the
sound Of crashing crockery in the kitchen
does to boarding house keeper. know
that, and I know 1 was dreadful hypocrite,
and my congregation knew I was, when 1
complimented the choir from the pulpit But,
sir, if they knew what it was to be at war
with church choir, they'd forgive man for
doing anything for the sake of peacew
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
"If Tn, Spared.
Exchange.

A Scotchman, SO goes the story, standing
by the family grave, said: ''There lies my
grandfather and my gran'mither, and my ain
father and mither, and there lies my brither
Bob, and my puir girl JEANNE, and there
lies my wife: and, if I'm spared, here I'll
lie, toon
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
a Suggestion to Peaeemakers.
EXCHANGE. l

They have peculiar but effective way C;
adjusting drunken brawiss at the new camp
Anaconda, in Montana It is accomplished
as follows:- When one Of the gang fills uI
and concludes he can whip the whole United
States, his most intimate friend takes him
out in the rear end OF the saloon, puts 8
head on him." and then quietly assists him te
bed The remedy IS good one and ought to
come into general use.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
The English Themselves.
London Letter.

The most amusing and interesting things
in London to an American, after al, are the
English people themselves. They are as
quaint and odd in their way as tho relics Of
the remoter ancestral antiquity they ara
fond of showing to Strangers for fee of SIX
pence at the door.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
Went Home Satisfied.
TChicaro Herald.1

An old gentleman from New jersey was in
the common pleas courtroom in New York
the other day at a time when Jay Gould, Rus
sell Sage, and Cyrus ". Field were all pres
emit For two hours the old man watched the
faces Of the Inillionaires with the closest at
tention. Il can go home satisfied now.n he
exclaimed, as he left the room, 'sfor 1 have
seen three men that's got money enough to
buy toe whole of New Jersey"
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
1t WouIdn'c Do.

Boston TranscrIpt
$50 your husband is a critic. Now, tell me,
does he always write just what he thinks
about playF'
ooh, dear, mol It wouldn't do His papers
go into the best families, and profanity is out
of the question"
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
Forgot to Cry.
New York News I

It was an absent-minded little maiden who
sat on the floor crying. After awhile she
stopped and seemed buried in thought. Look
ing up suddenly, she said: Mamma, what
was crying about.H Because I wouldn't
let you 60 down town. .'Oh, yes,n and she
set I'D another howl.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

Sneered Europe's wise men in their snail
shells curled:
MOI said one man in Genoa, and that No
Out of the dark created this new world
Lowell
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
A Prescription Hard to FIJI.

Whales milk is now recommended for Ger
tain bodily ailments. There is probably but
one article that is less easily procured, hens
tooth, and dealers in the cerulean product Of
the domestic bovine need fear no competition
at present
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

A. l. W: Live open and frank as we may
how much of the lives that run along side b.
side gaE remain hidden, each from the other
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

louisville Courier-Journal: Bernhardt is
said to want to come to America again. Sha
is probably only waiting for congress to in.
crease the volume of the currency.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

bones OBJ de aged wen de squint am gone out
de eye an de chilblains hut SO dat wen yo'
h'ar de fiddle yo' can't sarve de debbl no
longer.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

Carbolic acid, though an excellent disin-
fectant, is q poison. VIXEN drank, for which
there is no known antidote.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

Russian Proverb: Ask pig to dinner and
he viii put his feet on the table.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
One day the creditor of ail

One DAY the credltOr OF all
Dropped in for his amount;
He founl the old man at his post,
Though low ran natures fount;
The books were closed and he was boruo
Up to his last account.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26
ROMANTIC HAMPTON COURT.

the Black Hamburg variety and nursed with
Jealous care. The clusters hung ripe and
tempting above our heads. We saw it in its
perfection.
The pictures are wonderful-oyer thou
sand in number and covering the walls of the
various apartments. One room is devoted to
the beauties of Charles lis court. An
other to the beauties of William and Mary's
reign. Wonderous faces they are-an BY
Lely of the former and and KneIler of the
latter. Think Of two great apartments, with
the four walls of each covered with master
pieces Of these masters of the pencil Such
glorious warmth OF coloring, and blending OF
tints, and exquisite blending Of details, that
what with the magnificent proportions Of the
rooms, the gorgeous painting, the superb
mounting OF the pictures, and, best Of all,
the glow of the beautiful faces looking out at
one from every giIded frame, the scene is one
of rare enchantment.
Some OF the paintings In the state spart-
ments, where receptions were held and audi
ences granted, are Of prodigious size, the can
Vas in some cases, as in Kneller's Landing
OF William at Torbey," reaching twelve by
twenty feet at least. Very interesting relics
are preserved in many of the rooms in the
shape OF royal bedsteads, canopies of state,
tapestry and the like. It is not every day
one can see the very couch where royalty
once slept soundly or tossed unrestfully two
or three centuries ago. notice these mon
archs did not object to comfort; for the beds
are soft, puffy and luxurious, with the excep-
ton of George IL, whose unpreteatioIs, mar
row bedstead is in striking contrast with the
rest.
A PENNY pERpIEyrTy
In one corner of the grounds there is bit
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1883-12-26

q
In one corner Of the grounds there IS BIT
Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1883-08-09
PERSONAL.

Milton II. Sanford, celebrated trader
OF race horses, died at Newport, r. l.,
Friday afternoon, aged II years.
Samuel W. Moore, formerly mail route
agent on the Wilmington & Northern
railroad, died in Philadelphia hospital
Sunday.
Mr.. Snyder, who has SO efficiently man.
aged John Wanamaker's advertising
business has resigned that position to
engage in business for himself
Mgr. Capel Sunday preached his first
sermon in America in the Church of ST
Francis Xavier, New York, to an immense
congregation. His subject was st
Ignatius and the Jesui.s.
W.T. Rowland, United States Consul at
Nice died at Thun Switzerland last Fri
day, aged Al years. He was few years
ago head of the Rowland 4 Humphreys,
importers, of Wall street., New York.
John Holland, who, it ia claimed, oele
brated his 1924 birthday on the 18th of
June last, has just made the journey
from Bentonsport, Iowa, to Nashau, N. II. j.,
intending to spend the remaining years
Of his life in the latter place with mar
ried daughter. He stood the fatigue we'll
and on the evening OF his arrival Joined
in merry dance with his grandchildren
and friends.
According to authentic data Bob
Wheeler, a colored man of Silver Creek
Miss, was born in l775, and ia therefore
los years old. His parents were of pure
African blood, and were captured on the
coast OF Guinea and brought to this
country in a slave ship long before the
commencement of the war for indepen-
dence. Bob and his relatives were the
property of one family until the close OF
the civil war, and he is still protected
and cared for by the descendants of his
former owners. Nearly 75 years ago the
family emigrated to Mississippi, aud BOZ
has never since left the State.
j. G. Flood, one of the "Bopanza
kings" is preparing to build S., 600, 00C
residence on Fifth avenue, New York
and will spend $4,000, 600 additional in
furnishing it. There are few kings OIL
emperors in the Old World, that can beat
this magnihcence. Every room in thif
new Aladdin's palace is to be frescoed by
artists imported from Italy for the pur
pose, and the picture gallery will bt
adorned by not few of the master
pieces OF European collections. All thii
is part product of the Comstock mines
and tells, in brief tale quite as wonder
full as any in the Arabian Nights.
Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1883-08-09

Washington society has been trying in
vain to catch a glimpse of the Chinese
minister's wife, but few evenings since
q reporter Of the Post OF that city saw her
on street car with her husband. She
is thus described "To an unaocustomed
eye there is very little difference between
the masculine and feminine attire of the
Chinese, both being peculiar. But upon
close observation it was seen that Mrs.
Cheng Tsao JUS feet were beyond all Chris
tian conception OF smallness, and that there
was really great difference between her
costume and that of her companion. In.
stead of theswathe of linen bound tightly
about the ankles, she wore loose panta-
let's, coming within an inch of her shoes,
and, while the skirt of her frock was
similar to those worn by men, the yoke
and sleeves were made very differently
The yoke was shirred after the fashion of
the Mother Hubbsrds,' SO popular now,
and the sleeves looked more like ideal
angel wings than anything else one
could imagine. The whole costume was
made of plain black or very dark purple
Chinese silk. Her features were delicately
cut and refined, but her complexion
was quite dark though clear. She
wore pothi=g on her head except her
hair-as glossy as a ravens wing-which
was drawn back from her forehead and
lone up in an elongated roll at the back
Of her head, where it was pinned with 6
large oblong Of turquoise jewels. The
NO had hut little to say to each other, {
few shcrt sentences-apparently ques
items aud answers-oomprised their con
| yersstion, but the lady seemed not les
Interested with those about her than they
lid with her, and she sat with peculia
childlifs expression of curiosity anc
ronder upon her face.
Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1883-08-09

The result of the recent investigation
by the sub committee of the Senate Com
mittes on Foreign Affairs into the causes
Of the decline of menhaden and maukerel
catch is that June 18th is the earliest
time the fishing should begin. As the
catch is outside of state jurisdiction
there appears to be nothing left
hut for Congress to protect the
haheries by legislation. Menhaden
have not been seen along the coast of
Maine since 1879 until this year, when
they have appeared in small schools. The
fishermen attribute their absence to the
general use of purse seines. A difficulty,
1t is thought by the subcommittee, will
present itself in the manner of enforcing
protective legislation. 1t ia suggested
fishing vessels in clearing should not be
cleared by collectors with purse seinea on
board until the date fixed for lawfully
using them.