The Fremont County record., 1883-01-13
SCISSORISNfS.

Light housekeeping-Gving in tent
with sky-light
On New Years day. even the society
young man has q calling.
Logan may not be a strict temperance
man, but he don't like Porter.
Honesty is always the best policy. Just
look at Vanderbilt and Gould.
The late cold snap killed off everything
except the Texas greenbackers.
Ladies' stockings are still worn very long
sometimes as long as two weeks.
Staid old maidens do not look upon the
new hugging waltz rs the proper caper.
japanese woman delights in doll,
while an American girl dotes on dolman.
sneczing is said TO be healthy, because it
sets the blood in circulation and throws of
cold. That's snuff
There is said to be n fire company in
New York 40 high-toned that it uses none
but embroidered hose.
Within six years happy English mar
sied pair have been blessed with iriplets
twice, doublets twice and singlets twice.
Eldest daughter aged lO): a wonder
what made ma marry pap He l. not at all
the sort of n man ! should have cared for y
II is said that since Tabor has met Nm.
Langtry he has purchased wig, set Of
false teeth, and fell TO reading Byron's
poems
Let women he brought up to habits Of
industry and economy and learn to support
husband, and the tramp nuisance will
soon cease.
A young woman in Oil City possesses n
bass VOICE with n compass to ID first on the
bass cleft When she sees q rat the neigh
bors know il.
Four hundred and eighty-two iTamps
were killed on railroads during the last
year. Let us hear no more bowling against
the monoPolics.
An Ohio man unpinned tidy from q
chair and wiped his nose on it. IL takes
an Ohio man TO solve mysteries. Now We
lSiow what In thunder tidy is for.
Said n coroner 10 a witness at recent
inquest: Did you do anything 10 resuS-
titaie tho body - Yes sir.a answered
the witness, ave searched his pockets
An abscut-minded woman ia Kentucky
Put corn plaster on n letter and stuck
postage stamp on her corn. The letter
turned up dead but the corn is still
alive
We always claimed that the Mexicans
~onld not be slow in recognizing the merits
Of railroads. Ont of train Of twelve ears
Lately entering the City of Mexico, ten OF
them were loaded with beer.
II The tax On whisky is stricken OF, IL
will increase the number of cstndidaicsas q
= will place the principal element ofpersonal
and political popularity within the reach
OF the humble-t American citizen.
An able writer says: "In choosing n
wife he governed 10y her chin" A man.
in choosing a wife, may not he governed
by her chin, but he is pretty certain 10 be
governed by II TO a considerable extent
after he has chosen.
a woman's tongue IS her sword, and
she does not let il rust said the proycrb
"A woman's tongue Is her sword, and she
docs not lc; II rest the printer set II up.
There are some type-sctteus who have been
married 80 long that they don't care how
inelcgan;ly a domestic provcrb may be
shaped.
Texas siftings says Rcmcnyi, the cole
brated yiolinist, stopped playing before an
Austin audience because he heard note in
a mans pocket drawing interest aud anoth-
er mans corns aching. The hifaluting for
cigncr can't play at all unless the audi
once is 80 quiet that one can hear q gum
drop or pickle jar.
Mention was made some time ago of the
discovery of traces of prehistoric circus
in the deepest shan of Colorado mine.
Deeper digging has discovered the remains
of man, with the stains of burnt cork ON
his face. smashed tamborinc in his flesh
less fingers, with note pinned 20 striped
shirt stating that he was executed for per
petrafing stale Joke.