Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1883-03-05

Mrs. Biddy-with her claw in her
eye-"Please, I couldn't help it. 1
didn't mean to-"
o. c., Esq, (modifed) d)-s' Well,
well, don't fret your gizzard. You
are no chicken, madam, to be so
sensitive about trife; only remem-
Der my advice in future, and above
all, recollect that the crowning virtue
of henhood is disterestedness.
Mrs. Biddy, (meekly)-"Have a
worm, dear?"
O. c., Esq, (solemnly)-''I will"
SCENE THIRD.
Mrs. Biddy c., has been setting
for three weeks. O. c., Esq, ap-
pears in the distance, parting with
one of his numerous female friends;
the tones of his voice fall family on
Mrs. Biddy's ear.
O. c., Esq.,-"And now, sweetest
of hens, farewell, and may all the
stars Of heaven and all the saints of
the bamyard, meet to register the
day when your smile first dawned
upon my weary life, and made me
the hapIest of roosters. Farewell"
O. c., Esq, winds his homeward
way-''Good evening, Jack; mon
strous fine hen, that. Just been
parting with her. Or may be you
did not notice her fine points. Quite
fond of me, too, / assure you. Still
in tears, you observe-ahem! Cock
adoodle-do!" !"
O. c., Esq reaches the domestic
nest.
Mrs. Biddy (feebly)-"Oh, I'm so
glad to have somebody to speak to.
l haven't stepped off the nest, or
seen creature since sunrise. How
do you do, my dear? Anything new
going on in the yard -
A long pause. 0. c., Esq, ap-
pears to be suddenly overwhelmed
with depression and silent gloom.
Mrs. Biddy-''What's the matter,
sirr'
O. c., ESQ, Tin terrible voice,
and walking like hello)-"Matter !!
madam, behold y Qnserts his bill
under his left wing, and produces a
ROSTERS tail feather.) 'Do you
recognize that, madam? Do you
acknowledge an acquaintance with
the chicken-hearted caitiff who drop
ped it? Are you aware that I found
it within three feet of the domestic
nest?"
Mrs. Biddy Qanguidly) -"Did
you? l didn't notice it,
O. c., Esq. q.,-''Peace, hen and
listen! while in calm but decisive
terms 1 strive TO Impress upon your
mind the enormity of your conduct.
Has it not been decided, / ask you,
madam, has it not been the opinion
of rooster kind for ages, and is it not
| therefore undeniable, that, after dis
interestedness, the one thing needful
to the female character is excessive
modesty? A true hen is so strictly
and severely virtuous, that the slight
est attempt at intimacy from one of
an improper sex, though disguised
beneath the specieus mask of friend
ship, will excite in her breast the ex-
tremest aversion and horror. On the
contrary, what do / find to be the
case in regard to yourself? Only
yesterday, on returning Unexpectedly
from little party, l beheld you III
animated conversation with my broth.
err Heavens madam, am | to bt
longer the victim of such duplicity
No. sooner would | sacrifice at once
the domestic nest, and fling thy life
less body-Oh! oh, misery, vic
lence, revenge! 'Frailty, thy name
is hen y :"
Mrs. Biddy gets fidgety on he
nest. "Oh dear me, l am so tired
Silence for half an hour.
Mrs. B. Cin gentle depreciation)
"My dear, do you think you woulc
mind looking to the nest a minute
while / run and pick up something
I haven't taken mouthful to-day"
0. c., Esq, (starting up in doubt
MADAM, have heard you Alright
Do / understand that you have dis
tinctly offered to shift upon you
husband the little duties of the dc
mestic nest? Are you going to ste
from your sphere, madam? Do 20
} mean to be a hens rights hen
madam? Have / not again an
again impressed upon your mind tha
female selfshness alone is at the bot
tom of these impious doctrines? An
what, on the contrary, according
the decision of all rooster-kin(
should be the real pride and amb
; tion of henhood? Disinterestedness
a true hen glories in little crosses an
trials; for without temptations, sh
perceives that there can be no virtue
without trials, no patience withol
! affiiction, no resignation, which is s
lovely in the female character.
true hen, situated as you are: woul
not only rejoice that Providence ha
seen fit to perfect her with trials bl
with that beautiful self-abnegatio
which can never be too strenuous
l inculcated by rooster-kind, would s.
herself to planning new sacrifice
: | say true hen, in your situation
instead of sneaking from her lit
. duties. Would confriye some plan {