The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-04-28
THE BAD BOY.
Sun.,

.feeks Sun.
 "Well. grea, Julius C.esars bald headed ghost, what's the matter with you 2 saio the gracery man to the bad boy. as he came into the grocery oa crutchcs. with one arm in a slsnx, one eye blaekened. and a strip of eoar, plas- ter across one side of hss face. Where was the explosion. or, have you been in fight. Or. has your pa been giving you what you deserve, with a cluhs Herc, les me help you. -There. st down on that chair. Well. by the grrat guns 1! you look as though you had called some body liar. What's the matter!" And the grocery man took the cru,ches and stood them up aga,ns, the showcase.
 ~Oh, there's no, much the matter with me. sad the boy, in voice that sounded all broke up. as he took big apple oil basket, and began peeling Il with his upper iron, teeth. :" If you think am wreck. yoa ought to sec the min- isser. They had to carry hlm home in installments. the way they buy sewing machines. I'm Ill right. but they have got to stop hum up with oakum and tar. before he will ever hotd water again.
 Good graeiouss You have not had a fight with the minister. have you Well. have sad all the time. and l stick 10 1t. that you would commit crime yet. and go to state prison. What was the fuss about And the grocery man lad the hatchet ou, of the boys reach. for fear he would get excited and kill him.
 "Oh. il want no fuss. IL was in the way of business. You see. the livery man that was working for promoted me. tie lcs me drve horse to haul sawdust for bedding. first. and when he found was real careful. he let me drive an cxprcss-wagon. 10 haul trunks. Day before yesterday. I think II WAS (yes. l was in bed all day yesterday. day before yesterday there was funeral, and our stable furnished the outfit. 1t vas only q common eleven dollar funeral, and they iet me go ,o drive the horse tor the mil ier-you know, the buggy tha, goes ahead of the heaise. They gave me an old horse that Is thirty years old. that has not been of of walk since nine years ago. and they told me to give h,m loose rem. and he would go along nght. It's the same old horse that used to pace so fast on inc avenue, years ago bu, didn't know + Well. l van, to blame. l lust let him walk aloHk as though he was hauling saw dust, and gave hun loose rem. When NC got off ol the pavement the fellow that dnvcs the sarsc. he MAS in A hurry. cause his folks was gong to have ducks for dinner and he wanted te get back. SO he kept driving along side my buggs, and telling me :o hurry up. @"uiaat do II. cause the livery man told me ta walk the horse Then the minister. he got nervous. and sad he d,dn't know as there vas any use of goins so slow. because he wanted to get back in tune to get his lunch and go to minister meeting m the afternoon. -ou, told him we would all get to the cemetery soon enough II ~e took II cool. and as for me l wasn't in no sweat Then one of the drivers that was driving the mourners. he came up and said he h ad to get back m tune io run a wedding down 10 the one o clock tram. and for me to pull out a httle. have seen enough of di i-obe,iag oEsiers and l told hIm a funeral in hand w,S worth two weddings m the bush. and asf1 as was concerned thIs funeral was going to he conducted I'll a uts DtoQs Hl4iHtlNf. IT NC u.tn back tlil the mex, day We'll. the minister sad. in hIs regular sunday school way My little man. let me take hold of the lines. and likc darn fool gave them ,o hun. He slapped inc old horse on the cruppcr ~,th the lines. and then lefked up. and the old horse stuck up his of ears. and then the hcarse driver told the minister to pull hard and saw on the bli a littie. and the old horse would wake up The hearse diiyef used to drive the old pacer on the track. and he knew wha, he wanted. The munster took of his black kii gloves and put his umbrella down be- tween us. and pulled his hat down ugh, on his head, and began to pull and saw on the bi,. The old cripple began to move along sort of sideways. like A hog going 10 war, and the munster pulled some more, and the hearsc drlyer ~ho vas righ, be. hind. he said. so you could hear hm clear 10 Waukesha. 'Ye-e-up, and the old horse kept going faster. then the minister though, the procession ~as get ting toe quick. and he pulled harder, and yelled whoa. and that made the old horse worse. and 1 looked through the litiie window m the buggy top. be- hind. and the heaHse was about two blocks behind. and the driver was laagh- ing, and the minister he got pale and said. my little man 1 guess you better drlvc. and sad No, much. Mary Ann, you wouldn't let me run this funeral the way ] wanted to, and nov you can boss II, fl you le, me se, out, but there ~As A s,reet-car ahead and all of a sudden there was an earthquake, and when 1 come io, there sere about sx hundred people pouring water d,~n my neck, and the heaSse ~as hltched io the fence, and the heArst-dnsef ~as asking fl my lex was broke. and policeman was flaming the mirls,et with plug hA, thz, looked as though II had been struck by a pile dfiser, and some people were hauling our buggy into the gutter, and some men were trying 10 take inc old paeer out of the windows Of the sucei-czr. and then l guess fainted a~4y agin. .. # was worse than teies4 gtD.ug A tram loaded