The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1883-01-13
wIscONsIN's BOSS BAD BOY.
fPeck's Sun. ]

feck D sun.
What was tl.s Health Officer doing
over to yonr house this morning." said
the grocery man to the bad boy, as the
youth was firing frozen potatoes at the
man who collects 6 arbage in the alley.
"oh, they are searching for sewer gas
and such things, and they have plumbers
and other society experts till you can't
rest and come away for fear they
would find the sewer gas and warm my
jacket. Say, do You think it is right,
when anything smells awfully, to always
lay it to boy ?" E-aL.
"Well. in nine eases out of ten they
hit it right, but what do you think is the
trouble over to your house, honest ,"
rS-h-h! Now don't breathe word
of it to living soul, or am dead boy.
You see was over to the dairy fair at the
exposition building on Saturday night,
and when they were breaking up me and
my chum helped to carry the boxes of
cheese and firkins of butter, and cheese
man gave each of us piece of limburger
cheese, wrapped up in tin foil. Sunday
morning opened my piece, and it made
me tired. Oh, it was the offulest smell
l ever heard of, except the smell when
they found tramp who hung himself in
the woods on the White6sh Bay Road,
and had been dead three weeks. 1t was
just like an old back number funeral.
Pa and ma were just getting ready to 60
to church, and cut off a piece of cheese
and put it in the inside pocket of pas
vest, and I put another in the lining Of
mas muff, and they went to church.
went to church, too, and sat on back
seat with my chum, looking just as pious
as though was taking up collection.
The church was pretty warm, and by the
time they got up to sing the first hymn
pas cheese began to smell match
against mas cheese. Pa held one side of
the hymn book and ma held the other,
and pa he always sings for all that is out,
and when he braced himself and sang
just as I am, ma thought pas voice
was tinctured with billiousness and she
looked at him, and hunched him and
told him to stop singing and breathe
through his nose, cause his breath was
enough to stop clock. Pa stopped
singing, and turned around kind of cross
towards ma, and then he smelled mas
cheese, and he turned his head the other
way, and said 'whew, and they didn't
sing any more, but they looked at each
other as though they smelled frowy.
When they sat down they sat as far
apart as they could get, and pa sat next
to woman who used to be nurse in O
hospital, and when she smelled pas
cheese she looked at him as though she
thought he had the smallpox, and she
held her handkerchief to her nose. The
man at the other end of the pew that ma
sat near, he was stranger from Racine
who belongs to our church, and he looked
at ma sort of queer, and after the minis.
ter prayed and they got up to sing again,
the man took his hat and went out, and
when he came by me he said something
IN Whisper about female glue factory
Well, sir, before the sermon was owe,
everybody in that part of the church had
their handkerchiefs to their noses, and
they looked at pa and ma scandalous,
and the two ushers they came around in
the pews looking for dog, and when
the minister got over his sermon, and
wiped the Precipitation off his face. he
said he would like to have the trustee.
of the church stay after meeting, as there
was business Of importance to transact
He said the question of proper ventils
ton and sewerage for the church would
be brought up, and that he presumed tn.
congregation noticed this morning that
the church was unusually full of sewe,
gas. He said he had spoken Of the mat
ter before, and expected it would be at
tended to before this. He said he was Q
meek and humble follower Of the lamb
and was willing to cast his lot wherever
the Master decided, but he would b
blessed if he would preach any longer il
a church that smelled like a bone boiling
establishment. He said religion was ;