The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1883-08-08
The Bad Boy.
IPeck's sum-

- bE4Q tuo W buo Dd1
boy, as the youth stoJd ca 20 steps la a
uncertain sort of way, as though he did not
know whether he would be welcome or not
81 tell you, boy, | pity you. L understand
your pa has got to drinking again II is to-
bad. l can't think of anything that hui Mill
ates boy, and makes him so ashamed, as TO
have q father that is IL the habit of hosting
in TOO much benzine. A boy feels as though
every BODY was down on him, and dJa't
wonder that such boys often turn out bad.
What started your ps TO drin king sgain2"
90. ma thinks it was losing money on the
Chicago races. You see, pa is great on point
ers. He don't usually bet unless he has go.
sure thing, but when he gets what they call
spointer, that Is, somebody tells him GER
tain horse is sure to win, because the other
horses are to be pulled back, he thinks a Job
has been put up, and if he thinks heis indies
the ring he viii bet. He says it does not do
any hurt TO bet, if you win, and he argues
that man who wins lots of money can do s
great deal coed with it. But he had TO walk
home from the Chicago races sll the some,aud
he has been steaming ever since. Pa cant
stand adversely. Bat guess we have got him
sll right now. he is the scsitest man you
ever saw" and the boy took can opener
and began to cut the zinc under the stoye,
Just to see lift would work as we'll on zinc as
On tin.
"What, you haven't been disssctiug him
sgsin, have your" said the grocery man, as
be pulled stool up beside the boy to hear
the news. show did you bring him to his
senses2'
"Well, ma tried having the minister talk
to pa, but ps talked Bible, about taking
little wine for the stomach's sake and gave
illustrations about Noah getting full, so the
minister couldn't brace him up. and then ma
bad soma of the sisters come al d talkto him,
but be broke them all up by talking about
what an appetite they had for champagne
punch when they were out in camp last sum-
mer and they couldn't have any effect on
him, and so ma tR.d she guessed l would
have to exercise my ingenuity on ps again.
Ma has an idea that have go. some sense
yet, 60 told her that if she would do just as
esid, me and my cbum would scare ps 80
he would swear off She said she would and
we went to work. First l took pas spectacles
down to an opt;cisn, Saturday night, and
! bad the glasses taken out and pair put
in their plsce that would magnify,
and took them home and put them
in pas spectacle case. Then l got
suit of clothes from my chum's uacle's
trunk, about half the size of pas clothes.
pa is corpulent. l got plug hat three
sIZes smaller than pas hat, and took the
name out of pas hat and put it in the small
hat. / got a shirt about half big enough
for pa, and put his initials on the thing IN
der the bosom, and got numbar fourteen
collar. Pa wears seventeen. Pa had prom
lsed to brace up and go to church Sunday
morning, and ms put these small clothes
where ps could put them on. / told ma,
when pa woke up, to tell him he looked aw-
fully bloated, and excite his curiosity, and
hen send for me.''
you didn't play such trick as that on
poor old man, did your" said the grocery
msD, as a smile came over his face.
"You bet. Desperate diseases require des-
perate remedies. Well, ma told him ne look
ed swfully blosted, snd that his dissipation
VAS killing him, as well as all the rest of
the family. Pa said be guessed he wasn't
bloated very much, but he got up and put
on his spectscles and looked at himself In
he glass. You'd dide to see him look at
himself. His face looked IS big IS two
aces, through the glasses, and his nose was
sight. Pa looked scared, and then he
held up his band snd looked st that. His
hand looked like ham. just then / came
in, and turned psle,s with some chalk
on my face, and begun to cry, and l said
O., ps, what ails your You are 50 sweiled
lp l hardly knew YOU Pa looked sick
TO his stomach, and then he tried to
get on the pants. o, my, it was all 1 could
10 10 keep from laughing TO see Kim
pull them pants on. He could Just get his
egs in, and when got shoe horn and gave
il 10 him, he was mad. BE said it was q
mean boy that would give bis pa shoe horn
60 put on pants with The pants wouldn't
come around pa into ten inches, and pa SAID
ne must have eat something that disagreed
with him, and he laid it to watermelon. Ma
stuffed her handkerchief in her mouth to
keep from lstiing, when she see pa look at
hissel'. The legs of the pants we're 80 tight
pa couldn't hardly breathe, and he turned
ose, and said, 'Hennery, your pa is migaty
sick man. and then ma and me both laughed,
and he said We wanted him to die 50 we could
pend his life insurance II riotOus living.
But when pa put on that condensed shirt, ms
she laid down or. the lounge and fairly yell
ID, and laughed till my side ached. Pa got
it over his head, and got his hands IN the
sleeves, and couldn't get it either way, and
be couldn'tsee US laugh, but he could hesr
~, and ne said, Its dsrned funny, amt it.
20 have parent swelled up this way. If /
bust you will both be sorry Well. ma
took hold of one side of the shirt, and l
took hold of the other and We pulled il on,
and when pas head came up through the
colar, bis face was fairly blue. Ma told
i'm she was afraid ne would have stroke
Of spoplexy before he got his clothes on, and
guess pa thought so too. he tried to get
be collar on, but it wouldn't 90 half way
around bis neck, and he looked n the glass
and cried, he looked SO. he sat down in a
chair Al painted, he was so out of breath,
and the shirt and pants ripped, aud pa said
there was no use of living if he was gong to
be rival to q fat woman in the side-show.
Jait then put the plug hat on pas head,
arc it was so small it was going TO roll off,
when ps tried to fit it on his head, and then
| be took it of aud looked inside Of it, to see
# it was his hat, end when be found his name
in it, he isId, take il away. My head is
al wrong too" Then he told me to go for
Inc doctor mighty quick. got the doctor
ard tolc him what we we're trying to do with
Do, snd he said he would finish the JOB. So
he dc csme in and pa on the lounge,
| 4nd when the doc saw him he said it wa