Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1883-04-13

Helps tear TO unooSom its sadness.
-(Joseph Dawson.
The young Paris blood wears very little
hat.
Advice to matchmaking mammas-First
catch your heir.
The Episcopal Church papers are urging
the celebration of the centennial Of the
Church this year.
An effort is TO be made at Ottawa, Can.
ada to train TO harness the twin moose re.
Gently presented to the Governor. General.
An old Judge told young lawyer he
would do well to pick some Of the feathers
from the wings of bis Imagination and stick
them into the tail of his judgment.
Miss Lena Pastoret, of Duluth, was run
into and knocked down by clumsy skater
and died few days later from the injuries
received.
"Well," said an artist, "there's one
thing l can say-my painting is original.
Nobody can accuse me Of copying" mot
even Nature, remarked one OF his hearers.
boston Transcript.
Some one has remarked that the differ
ence in the conditions of the good and the
bad in the life to come is merely in degree,
The righteous get eternal bliss and the
wicked "eternal blister"
Captain Victor Wolf of .he company
that carried sod Abe the war eagle,
through the rebellion, had the misfortune
to have his left leg badly broken by being
thrown from sleigh at Chippewa Falls,
Wis.
A man who was digging for ore in
Shawano county, Wis, uncovered den
of snakes and killed twenty. two, measur.
ing from four to seven feet each. 1t wasn't
very good snake section either for that
State.
A young lady was recently asked by her
gallant what she considered the hight of
impudence. Looking archly at him, she
said "Spark girl for three solid hours
and never offer to kiss her. He is not
impudent any mora.
Z" thought" remarked the victim after
the dentist had dragged him around the
room several times, "you advertised to
extract teeth without pain p $50 1 do,
sir" replies the dentist sit doesn't hurt
me at all to yank 'em %
A gentleman of Madison, Ind, is the
possessor of watch which once belonged
to Marie Antoinette, Queen of France.
| This fact has been communicated to the
French Minister at Washington city
through the State Department..
Joaquin Miller is of the opinion that the
New York broker" is well-dressed dog
barking at the heels of decency and virtue,
and that when one of them is shot down
like dog he meets his proper fate. Has
Joaquin been heeced lately II Inter Ocean.
Boetel, thenew tenor over whom European
opera-goers are in ecstasies, was formerly,
| like Wachtei, cab driver. His old com.
panions in that trade in Hamburg, where
he was discovered, have just presented him
with a silver whip of honor" which cost
Sl20.
There is young lady up in Columbia
county who is SIX feet tall and is engaged
to be married. The man who won her did
it in these words Thy beauty sets my
soul aglow I'd wed thee, right or wrong
man wants but little here below, but wants
that little long. Irwinton (Ga.) South
ern.
The new anti-Sunday fishing law of New
York was supposed to 60 into effect April
lst. AS usual Inc the fishing season the
piers were lined with men and bristling
with poles. The haul was light, but the
anglers enjoyed the sport all the same,
unmolested by the police, who had no or
ders to make arrests.
Collisions at sea may be prevented by
using ballons, says John ii. Schultz, of
| New York, who proposes that all vessels
be provided with balloons Of sufficient Ca
pacity to take person high enough above
the fog to see the balloons of other vessels
in the vicinity, whose relative positions he
can communicate to the ships officer.
Historian Bancroft once published vol
ume of poems of which he is now not at all
proud. The little book was issued in 1928
and copies of it are hard to find. At re.
cent sale copy sold for $40. The pur-
chaser wrote MIR. Bancroft "Can l
secure other copies ?" By return mail he
received the reply: Plenty of them-at
the same price"
Some time ago gray squirrels placed On
Boston Common killed the song birds.
Neighboring cats made nocturnal warfare
on the squirrels. Next the policemen
killed the cats. Then the old maids
who owned the cats event for" the pc.
licemen It was like "The House That
Jack Built, regularly ascending series.
And the policemen are still wrestling with
the matured female owners of the cats.
From all accounts the Chinese find civil
| lied New York a worse city in which to
dwell than was ever barbaric Frisco. They
are subjected to all sorts of indignities and
injuries from hoodlums, and get no protec-
ton from the police. The Celestial does
even better in Chicago, for here our row.
dies and thugs only break necks and cave
in heads for the profits of robbery.-[Chi.
cago Inter. Ocean.
A little bright-eyed boy, upon hearing
his father read the story Of Joan of Arc,
was greatly moved By her sad trials but
when the part was reached where she was
about to be burned to death at the stake,
the poor little fellow could not contain
himself any longer, but sobbingly clutched
bis parents arm, and with big tears run
ming down his plump little cheeks, cried,
I" But, pa-paps, wh-e-re were the po-
ice1'
Paper houses are coming into use in En-
gland, where for some purposes they are
found greatly superior to tents. Shooting
boxes twelve feet square were found con-
venient, both TO use and transport, and,
the material being impervious to moisture,
the little cottages are satisfactory from a
sanitary point of view. 1t is said that they
will be used at the seaside during the CON-
ing season, not only for bathing houses, but
as s. residences for quiet bachelors of con-
templative habits.
In April, 1880, Miss Anna L. Hoff nan,
of New Albany, Ind.s was run over by
railroad train and her right arm and left
hand cut off, Through skilled treatment
her life and her left arm were saved. A
reporter who visited her few days ago
found heI in good health, cheerful and
making herself generally useful. By aid
of an artificial hand, made by her father,
che can pump and carry water, bring in
coal, write good hand. and play the
piano almost as dextrously as an I'M
manned person.-tB Boston Globe.
Miss Catherine Lewis, the actress, has
cut the bonds which bound her in bust
ness capacity TO her husband, Mr.. Arrived
SOD, and declares that hereafter S. e
| 90 rnananes herself y The starv Ia that