davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
A Scarf Pin for n Dude,

A prominent member of the band of
gilded youths of which the city is so
Justly proud is in high state of excite
ment, and with difficulty held back by
his friends from making personal AS
sault upon his jeweler, who he con-
ceives, has been putting up job on
him. The facts. as gained during his
lucid intervals, are these: He is much
addicted to attending the dramatic
performances which occur in this
city, his speciality being in steadily
observing the female chorus in comic
opera, and the sylphs of the corps de
ballet in their ingenious gyrations. Ii
struck him that it would be a good no.
ton to wear scarf pin suggestive OF
his love for the lyric stage, and he ac-
cordingly interviewed his jeweler upon
this momentous subject. The artiiicer
in precious metals was prompt to meet
the demands of the occasion, and in due
time presented his customer with neat
design, consisting of bar of music
dellcately fashioned in gold, with the
treble clef in black enamel, and two
notes in diamonds reposing between the
third and fourth lines from the bottom.
The customer, whose only knowledge of
music was, as it suggested, the accom-
panying incident of female singers,
highly approved this work of art, pur-
chased it, stuck it in his scarf, and went
down to the matinee. After the per-
formancc he displayed his new posses
sion to the ladies, who admired il much.
AT last he showed il to the prettiest and
brightest one of all, who Immediately
exclaimed; ''How very neat and APP
propriate"' "Do you think SOP" in
CURED the delighted youth, Certainly
| do, and those beautiful diamond
notes; they tit you so well. Do, do
that makes dodo. you see. How ingen-
ious and how very true."-and she
tripped away.-Boston Journal,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
typographical Errors.

The South Bend Tribune contains
the following: "Thc typographical err
rors arc usually shouldered on the
'blundering compositor,' but the ma
jority of them belong to the careless
proof.reader and the Enthusiastically
bad penmanship of the average editor.
Last fall the Chicago Tribune, in
speaking Of sermon preached in one
of the Chicago churches, said it was
clear cut lying Clear cut logic was
what was written. The Inter-Ocean
of the same city, in an account of a
social party, said certain prominent
Englishman was the liar of the eve
ming 1t meant 1ion,' but the cold
types came nearer the truth, for the
Englishman's book about this country
was full Of lies. Peck's Sun tells of
an editor who headed an article The
Phantom Bride and the compositor
set it up The Pontoon Bridge This
was not so bad as the Cincinnati En-
quirer's extended notion Of fashion.
able wedding, which was headed We'd
ding Bills and without doubt more
properly than Wedding Bells The
Tribune has before referred to that
item in 4 rural Michigan exchange
last winter, which should have read,
Mrs. Smith watercd her plants last
night and found them frozen stiff this
morning, and how the intelligent COM
positor left the IL out of plants, and
showed how important missing con-
sonant Is. Almost as bad was an item
in the Bay City Tribune, which meant
to say that Rev. G. 4. Smith, while
wandering in a log yard, fell between
two logs The wrong vowel got in
the word logs, and made il read legs
and the reverend gentleman threaten
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
There She SpOuts.

About three o'clock the other after
noon, says the New London, Conn. }
Day, as Captain ID. G.. Tinker, an old
whaler, and one of the crew of the
light-ship, were coming from Bartlett 5
Reef with the Keepers monthly report,
in the large schooner rugged boat at
tachcd to the ship, Captain Dan dis
covered something in the water, on his
lee bow, which looked strangely UNI
familiar i'm these waters, and yet pecu-
larly familiar to Captain Tinker's re-
collection of tho days gone by. He
called to the man with him, and pointed
to the object in the water. just at the
moment monster lifted itself out of
the deep, and the forkcd spout of n
right whale was cast high into the air,
leaving no further doubt of the in
dividuality of the strange visitor. Capt
ain Tinker estimated that the whale
was at least of sixty barrels capacity,
and had not less than $1,000 worth of
oil and bone inside its carcass. The
sea monster was first discovered about
a mile and a half n0rthcast from the
Bartlctt's Reef light vessel, and in the
deep water between Goshen and Bart
let's Reef. Captain Tinker steered to-
ward the whale, tackled and retacked
after him, got within fifteen feet of him
once, and within twelve feet of him
again. He kept the animal In view for
more than an hour, and saw him sink,
rise and spout five successive times.
II there had been bomb lance on
board there were three certainties of
killing the whale. II was too late when
Captain Tinker arrived in the city to
return with boat and weapons, and
probably the whale Is by this time
navigating the temperate waters Of
the gulf stream, The right whale Is
very seldom seen in the North Atlantic,
and il Is more than hundred years
since there IL any record of such fish
in Long Island Sound, although over
quarter of century ago 1t Is
recorded that parties went right whal-
ing in the waters between Fishers
island and Montauk Point. IL Capt
ain Tinker had two hours more
daylight SO that he would have had
imo to get boat out before dark
ness had set in he has no doubt that his
bank account would have been several
thousand dollars heavier.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27

ed a libel suit He was as badly
scandalized as the minister who was
presented with family Bible, and it
got into the paper "A family bottle
A typographical error in a Denver
paper last week caused the reporter
who suffered to seriously mediate
suicide. He had written of the Col
orado Canon: Gaze up and down
the rocky jaws and you imagine the
world has opened its mouth to eat a
planet and grind it with mountain
molars.' After the intelligent compos-
itor had got in his work there was less
boldness in the figure of the speech,
inasmuch as the world was made to
open its mouth TO eat a peanut His
penmanship was, perhaps, something
like Horace Greeley's, which was so
nearly illegible that man once of
fered 800 to any one whe would de-
cipher note he had received from the
apostle of the white overcoat. One
man submitted this as the result of his
labor: Doughnut fried in lard causes
Indigestion, badly Another offered
this: Idiots laugh at abolitionists,
you bet A third claimed the prize
with this effort: I'D knock the stuff
fin outen him if he was my offspring
and young lady was positive it read:
Sparkling Sunday nights is a whole
some occupation The owner of the
note was chairman of lecture COM
mittee in 1870, and the hieroglyphics,
when translated by an expert, read /:
j do not intend to lecture this winter.
Yours, ETC., H. Greeley"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27

Rev. Melancthon Fish, IA colorcd di-
vine, received call from n colored
congregation, provided he gave satisfac-
ton. Last Sunday he preached his
trial sermon. After il was over he
walked home with Uncle Nose, who
is celebrated for being the most candid
old nigger in Austin.
dat ar congregation" said the
Reverend Fish. patronizingly, IAN
composed of de finest looking BODY of
men | cbber saw.
"Ef dat am your candied 'pinion,
you should ncbber have called 'em
bclubbcd bredcren," remarked Nose,
quietly.
"Why not, Uncle Mose?"
"Bekase you don't look like YOU
belonged to de family. You aint fine
enough looking to be more den forty
second cousin, much less brudder.
There now exists a polar wave, or a
glacial period, between Uncle Nose and
the new pastor, and there is some talk
of hostile meeting. 7eras SJtiugs.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27

1t Is said that in London every
fourth person receives gratuitous medi-
cal attendance.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27

Posters, Handbills, Circulars, Letter &
Note Heads, Bill Heads, Statements,
Invitations, Programs, Envelopes,
Cards, Blanks, Blank Books,
etc., etc.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27

Philosopher to sharp boy: "What
are the properties of heat p Boy
"The chief property is that it expands
bodies while cold contracts them"
Philosopher-"Very good; give me
an example" GIN summer, when it
is hot, the days are long; in winter,
when it is cold, the day is short
Exit philosopher, lost in amazement
that so familiar an instance should
have so long escaped his own obser-
walton.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
Train Dispatching.

"People who climb on passenger
train when she is two or three hours
late little imagine what endless plan
ming and management it takes to get
her through safely. Let a freight get
behind time and we can handle her by
running her on another trains time,
but passenger breaks up everything
on the road. A train dispatcher must
be familiar with every circumstance
and every possible combination of cir
cumstances. He must know on ust
what portions of the road fast time
can be made and give orders accord
ingly. He must never give an order
for a certain time to be made unless
he is positively certain that the grade
and condition of the weather will per-
NIT of such time being made. To-day
[ may order train to run from sta
ton A to station B, and another for a
train to run from b to A, when the
same order tomorrow would precipi-
tate q collision. You have got to
know all the men on the line. Why,
on that road that l. worked on there
would be engineers and conductors
that could never get train through
on time. Then there would be others
that would never be late except in
case of accident. Why, sometimes
during my eight hours of duty would
give 250 train orders. Just think of
that moment. Here is passenger
train four hours late and a freight
side-tracked at almost every station.
Of course that puts every train behind
time. First / have to order the oper
ator to put out his flag and hold the
train for orders, and then | have to
send the order and wait for it to be
repeated back. At the same time a
train may be passing a station five
miles away, where | want to hold and
side-track her. All this time / must
not only keep clear track for the
passenger train, but must not unnec-
essarily detain the freights. Some
times right in the middle of a rush of
business like this the wire will break |
or some operator will leave his key |
open. Then everything is to pay.
Fortunately the train dispatcher's
order is law. Every employe is bound
to obey it. So we do not have to wor-
ry about that"
"Why did you leave the business ?"
Because l was growing year
older every week. l had the work of
ten men upon my shoulders. You
often hear about the brave engineer,
clinging with firm resolve and calm
to the throttle while the
engine is plunging on toward inevita-
BILE destruction. His responsibility
is nothing. He has only single train
and has no duty but to obey rules.
The train dispatcher has a hundred
trains under his finger that presses
upon the key. A moments delay to a
train, a trifling accident to
n freight, and the dispatcher is cussed.
The eight hours you put in bending
over your key seems like week.
Your head swims and grows dizzy be-
meath its awful responsibility. No
more train dispatching for me, if you
please" -Cleveland Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
ALPENA WEEKLY ARGUS.
MISCELLANEOUS.
GRANDMOrHERs PORTRAIT

oh, many, many years aRo,
They tell me she was fair
They say tho yellow buttcrcups
We're Jealous of her hair;
That all the peach blossoms blushcd TO sec
The soft pink on her checks
That buc-bclls looking at her eyes
Would hang their heads for weeks.
But she-shc only laughs and says;
"Ah, that was long nRo!
My hair nothing need envy now
Except the drifting snow.
The peach-blossoms and the blue-bclls
Have long since smiled away
The silly fear they may have had
In some pnst summer day."
And Ill think her loVclcr
Than any flower that grows:
And when look into her eyes
fancy that she knows
Her sweet ngc Is more beautiful
Than faircst youth could be,
Though when | tell her what think,
She only laughs NJ me.
The Continent.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
M I.efnbnre de Eonrcu "a

M. Lefcbure de Fourcy was exam
ming student in physics once upon q
time, and the young man being nervous
failed utterly on the first question put
to nina very simple one, Bring
this gentleman a bundle of hay for his
breakfast remarked the Disguised ex-
aminer to one Of the attendants. Bring
two--the professor and will breakfast
togcther!' added the student, who thus
suddenly regained and asserted his self
possession.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27
Telling A Story.

oieei se", "hch tho man WIN SsN'y
began to tell it.
"By the way" he said, 81 heard a
good thing in town to-day"
"Was it very warm in town ?" ask
ed the woman who stays at home.
He assured her that it was, and
went on
81 met Jack Rollins"
"What, little Jack ?" exclaimed the
old gentleman. "Why, / remember
when Jacks father first came to
Huckleberryville, Ion fore he married
Hulda-she was a Smith, you know,
ole Billy Smiths darter. Ole Billy
was Gurus chap. Did ever tell yer
bout that scrape him and me got in
ter in Their winter of thirty-fve-no,
twas thirty-four,-yes-no- Well,
/ disremember zactly wich; but any
how, Billy and me, we"
"Yes, yes, we know all about it,
Uncle Ben," said the man with the
story. GAS | was saying, l met Jack
Rollins, and he and l thought we'd
go down to the beach and have a
swim"
"You are getting on swimminly
now," observed the retailer of second
hand puns.
swell, as l was saying" resumed
the man with story, Jack and |
went down to the beach and"
"You had nice BATH" said the wo-
man who interrupts.
mo l didn't" sharply answered
the man with story; "you see the
tide"
"Ob, that reminds me of a funny
thing that happened to a lot of us fell
lows when we were in the armyW ex-
claimed the war veteran. at was
just after the second Bull Run, and
the major"
The war veteran was reminded of
this "funny thing" invariably seven
evenings a week, and though he al
ways told it from beginning to end,
nobody ever listened to it. 1t is not
necessary, therefore, to repeat it here.
After he had finished, however, the
man with story began again:
"The tide, you see, was way out,
and Jack said we might as well 60 up
to the hotel"
"Oh, tell u.s." again interrupted
the retailer of second-class puns.
The man with story frowned on
the punster and continued:
"Go up to the hotel and see who
was there. Charley Sprague's-"
as Charley one O Squire Spraguc's
boys?" queried the old gentleman.
"The Squire and me-"
"No, Charley isn't one of the
Squire's boys, Uncle Ben" was the
rather peevish rejoinder of the man
with a story. Charley"
"Do you remember what time we
had that night it rained so p sudden
ly asked the young lady with an era
tic mind.
ats awful dry" remarked the anna
teur agriculturist; eff we don't have
rain soon, I guess my potatoes won't
amount to much"
"What horrid dress that Boston
woman had on to-day" said the
young lady in the rocking chair.
1--WE had a bully time on the river
to-day" interjected the boy in the
flannel shirt.
"Shall you 60 to the mountains be-
fore you return ?" asked the young
gentleman who was doing the agree
able to the young lady with the low
forehead.
The man with a story saw it was no
use. So he gave it up in dispair and
walked sadly away, leaving the others
to chatter at their own sweet will.
But, mark you, he will tell that
story to every one Of them separately
before the week is out, and probably
two or three times to most of them.
They will come to the conclusion final
" that it would have been much bet
ser for them to let the man with
story tell it at once and have done
With it.-Boston Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-06-27

have been so deceived by the other man
was constant wonder Youths Com
pani0n
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07
NEW PHOTOGRAPHS.

Mr.. Williams, who has returned
from his Photographic trip to Ha-
waii, brings about $50 negatives of
views taken chiefly about Hilo and
at the volcano. He has n view of
the o!d temple at Kawaihac and an
instantaneous one of the boiling
lakes; others show very peculiar
lava formations and lava that has
remained fast to the tops of trees
for many years. 1t will be some
time before all the photographs are
printed and mounted, and until then
it is impossible to form any idea of
their variety or quality. During
his trip, Mr.. Williams was some
what inconvenienced by the action
of Mr.. Jordan, the manager of the
volcano house, who, on hearing that
the former manager, Mr.. Lentz. was
accompanying Williams, wrote him
a letter telling him to take tent for
his guide. In order to avoid trou-
bic, Williams, at extra expense, en-
gagged another guide. Although
Jordan advertises his house as a
place of public accommodation it
seems that he objects to receiving
some people for others have been
written to by him to the effect that
they would not be received. Will
liams speaks well of his own treat
ment while there.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

of the existence of the Protest from
q rather brief note, sent them with
copy of the document, onWednes-
day subsequent TO its appearance in
print. They will probably be called
to account by their respective Go
vernments for not having expressed
their opinion of the document by the
mail which carried it abroad, their
Governments never imagining for
one moment that they were not
cognisant of its existence. This
document we maintain should have
been forwarded to Foreign Powers
through the resident commissioners,
but apparently, from the manner i'll
which they have been ignored, their
official positions are not recognized
by this Government.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07
AN ACCIDENT,

A Portuguese boy was recently
killed at Paauilo, when eating sugar
cane at the stable where the mules
were feeding, by stone thrown by
native named Kahuhu. At the in
quiry which was held after the boys
death before Judge Miaa at Homo
kaa it was ascertained that the boy
went to school for some days after
the injury and that it was twenty
days after the accident occurred be-
fore he died. The doctor said that
when called in the boy was insensi-
BILE and it was impossible to say
whether his right side was paralyzed,
as had been stated, but there was q
wound an inch in length on the left
side of the top of his head and there
was no fracture of the SKULL that
the scalp wound was sufficient to
produce suppuration and that neg
lect was the possible cause of the
Inflammation. Kahuhu, the man
who threw the stone, stated that he
saw no children at the time and was
not acquainted with the boy. Wal
chino, the policeman, said that he
saw small cut on the boys head
with blood flowing from it and that
Kahuhu told him he had done it
himself. The Coroner's verdict was
that the boy died from Il elbow on
the head from stone thrown by
Kahuhu at mule on July 10th,
which accident killed the boy Juan
de Medeiros. Kahuhu was not re-
primanded in any way by the Coro-
ner and the evidence is somewhat
contradictory in some particulars.
The father of the boy has made
some complaints to the Portuguese
Commissioner on the subject and
has asked that he may be removed
to another plantation.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07
THIS DAYS DOINCS.
AFTERNOON

Ladies' Prayer Meeting, Fort st.
Church, ut 3 O'Clock.
EVENING.
Imp. Order of Red Men, at Z 80.
Morning Star Lodge, X. of j. Z 80.
Social at Miss Breeae's, 1:3O.
Special Meeting Boys Reading
Room Association, at 7:30.
POLYNESIA Encampment, ut 80.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

THE September number of the Friend
urges the Humane Society to proceed
with its work and contains long ac-
counts of the Chinese Mission work on
these Islands. The Y. M. G. A. page
complains of the falling off in the atten
dance at Fort Street Church during the
vacation
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07
Saturday, September 22nd

at 12 noon, at our Sales Room, in Homo
lulu, all those certain pieces or parcels
of land situate at Kaukahoku, KAPPA.
lama, Island of Oahu. and more particu.
larly described as follows:
ID Apana 5, 2 loi anne Kula. + hoo
maka ma ha pohaku a holo Ak II
Kom 447 pauk anne Ak 29o Kom 40
pauku pill me Keoneula, alalla Hem
coo Kom 4i8 pauku pill me John
Needles alaila Hem 30 Hik 21S pauku
anne Hem 43 , Kom 255 pauku pill me
Geogi Homt alaila Hem 4So 45 III Hik
81 pauku phi me VIM. Hebcla alaia
Ak Al : 45m Hill pill me Hura Moeino
hiki illl hoomaka ana He 2 35-100
Eka, and ! eing the same p emise, de-
scriled in Royal Pltcn' No. 1861 Ku-
leana Helu 7GSl,
(2) Ekolu loi me hahuahale E hooma-
ka ana ma Ike kihi holo ana Ak AZ
Hik 535 pauku pill ana iko Kekuama-
oa Hem 66 Hik 266 pauku pill ana
iko Kekuano Ak coo Hik 1874 pauku c
pill ana iko William Sumner Ak 81 LON
45 pauEu pill ana iko VIM. Sumner
Ak $50 Kom 115 pauku pill ana iko
VIM. Sumner Ak II Kom 365 pauku e
pill ana iko VIM. Sumner Hem $50
Kom 160 pauku pill ana ike Paele
Hem 80 Hik 100 pauku pill ana iko
Paele Hem 600 Kom $50 pauku pill
ana iko Paele, Hem 60 Kom 209 pauku
pill ana iko Keluonui, Hem Soc Hik
% pauku phi ana iko Keluonui o hiki
ike kihi mua 1862. Eka, and being the
same premises described in Royal Pa
tent No 2,S48 Kuleana Helu 7,103.
For further particulars apply to Cecil
Brown Attorney for Mortgage, or TO
LYONS s. LEYEY, Auct'rs.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

TIE American bark Spartan is now
175 days out on her voyage from New
York to Honolulu and considerable
anxiety is felt as to her safety. She has
Away been 1eckoncd fast sailcr, Eav
ing made the run from Singapore to
New York in 105 days, from Coconada
to New York in l0S days, from Anger
to New York in S5 days, from New
York to Singapore in 9s days, from New
York to Zanzibar in 90 days, from New
York to Valparaiso in 81 days and from
Mozambique to Coconada in % days.
The last mentioned passage is the quick.
est ever made between those ports, and
her present one to Honolulu is the
longest she has ever made.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

A thrcc-masted flagstaff was success
fully erected at Iolani College on We'd
nesday afternoon.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

A letter enclosing copy of The
PROTEST has been sent to Don Celso
Cesar Moreno, predecessor in Office
of Mr.. Gibson's.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

At meeting of the Board of Repre-
sentatives of the Fire Department last
night, Mr.. Henry Smith was elected
Secretary by majority of one.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

THE Portuguese boy who was gored
by Judge McCully's bull died on Tues
day morning. A post-mortem eXamina-
ton disclosed the fact that the fifth and
sixth cervicle vertebrae had been frac-
tured right through the body and it is II
wonder that the boy lived so long. The
other sufferer is improving and has been
out driving.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

ONE of the horses imported by Mr..
Hanson from San Francisco in the
Kalakaua died of cramps n few days
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

HART BROS have received a lot of
new candies and French creams ut the
Elite parlors where ladies can obtain
Ice creams every day.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07

The first dividend, SO per share, in
the stock of 4. o. Hall and Son Limited
is payable to-day.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1883-09-07
SHIPPING NOTES.

Schr Mana, brought 28O bags Of sugar.
Schr Kekauluohi brought 512 bags Ct
paddy
scIr Pohoiki brought 80 cords of fire
wood
Two toilet rooms are being built on
the quarterback of the Iwalani.