The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1883-12-05
THE J0KER'S BUDGET.
WHAT WE FIND IN TUE HUMOROUS
PAPERs TO SMILE OVER.
WANTED A WHIPPING.

/ know n pair Of boys beside whom
even Helen's Babies must have dwind,ed
and grown tame. Naughty, wilful, mis-
chievous, loving little scamps. They were
at times IA soundly thrashed M rather
soft hearted father would permit, For
time they would mind; but they
"wouldn't stay minded" 10 usc child.
ish expression. Nothing seemed so
forcible a method of punishment rs TAX
ing away their spcnding-money-a few
pennies each day.
For some particularly grievous offense
this was resOrted to two or three days
before the Fourth Of July, and great WAS
their grief and indignation.
Very early the next morning the
father. who had visited this upon them,
was awakened by hearing them at the
chamber door crying.
"Boys?"
ooh, papaW
"Boys-go back to your room !"
"Oh, papa-dear papa-won't you
please give us our pennies and go back
to the whippings?'
,n,n,>,, ,,,,,. ,,o,,,,u
""'i"''o' ''''o'''"''
Oar is hundred seekers artcr money
whar dar is one seeker artcr happiness.
We amt got no respeck fur dc stingy
man, nor fur de Teller what filings his
money away.
A mans awkward shape amt no argu.
ment agin his 'prcciation oh de finer
pints Oh life. A ole black bear amt
putty, but he's powerful fon' Oh honey
De 'possom was neber thought ten
nan mnch sense, bnt hes mighty smart
like he was dead. while the coon. WIN,
all oh dc animals call ledge. r'ars aroun
an neber fails ter git hurt.
has often heerd dat de bes' is d.
chrapcs'. Dis doan' hole good in al
cases, fur I'll he dmged # de cheapes
way ter lib is de hes A man mont tel
me dat bread an ingons il better del
bread, meat. 'tatcrs an ingons. but
wouldn't belebe him.
It's mighty strange, but de biggcs
sinners in de worl believes in de cher
lastin' fire oh lie debil. | has knowcC
many good man what didn't bclicy,
dat de debil was half sich n powerful
Teller as de preachers said, an I ha,
knowed many q thief dat believe,
ebcrything he was told about de- ole man
| amt got much confidence in dat giol
what is based OH fear A convict ma,
work mighty hard case de obersccr i
lookin', but dc work il ncbrr done n
well as il he want io'ced ter do it
Arkansaw Taveler.
- -
f"'""'"" '''''
In the Lime Kiln Club Judge Chews
arose TO ask for information. He wante
to know how strong the frlternal ties q
such club should he considered. IIo,
far was he obligated?
"Brother Chewso, replied the pres
dent, 81 will read de follerin' iur You
beneht:,
u, All meet heah on terms OF equa
ity, but de member who blacks Stove
an saws wood am not spected to be =
familiar as to ask dc barber alrnln' VI
per week to lend INN his tooi-plck.
"2. If you find brudder in distress
aid him. Oar am no perhckler ohlecF
shun to takin' mortgage on ms stoV,
in case he wants to borry 10 dollars
cash, but give MN niue snow Del
to'closin'
80. Excuse brudder's faults MS II
MS you kin, but arter he has spit on yo
butes about three times You KIN co
clude dat ne aches TO TIC iicked.
"A SPEAK wei OF each odder; aVo
wrangles ah SANDER DO ready 10 gii'
good advice; encourage Sooriety an Il
dustry, Dut doah iet man KICK y
dog, Simply peR"se nc s,ts on oe sto
mex you Ill farau'se HAIL. --DeTo
f'ce Iress,
USING a FIRE hsoArh'
The other day prominent citizen Q
Detroit, says the Free Press, who ha
been greatly interested in the subject
fire. escapes, was inspecting n building
on East Woodbridge street which ha'
lust been equipped with balconies nm,
ladders. and he summed up his opinio
with:
"Well, sir, there's no need of an acci
dent here in case of fire. All any EN-
nloyee has to do is to coolly step from
window to one of the balconies and d,
scend in perfect safety"
At one o'clock Saturday Afternoon
this same citizen was in the same bull