Memphis daily appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1847-1886, 1883-01-28
Written for the Memphis Appeal
SHOPS AND SHOPPERS,

| WAS Ouiy OHc duOuS uuuutcu
planted for the convenience of lady shoppers,
who NOT infrequently drop upon them with
an air pathetic to behold, and when lad.
dressing themselves 10 the public at large)
they assert in tones so positive as to leave no
room for doubt that "they are simply tired
to DEATH" it is study in physiognomy to
note the expression of sympathetic solicitude
creeping over the features of the shopwoman
on the stoolless eide of that counter, who has
been on her feet ever since 7 o'clock in the
morning, and now awaits madame's pleasure
with courteous patience.
1t was quite late in the afternoon, the long
rows of gas Jets were ablaze throughout the
handsome store, where everything looked
bright and cosy, and inviting even to the
smiling employees who have no time to re-
member aching soles until ciosing-hour
comes. But as 1 was in friendly attendance
upon professional shopper, was prepared
to possess my stool in patience, we'll knowing
that the shadows outside would be denser and
the tired feet behind that counter more tired
yet by half an hour or more before the mo-
mentous decision of "Cluny" or "Ham-
burg,n an "inch or an inch and half"
should be arrived at. Does anybody know
the fullness of meaning conveyed in the
term-"professiona shopper~ For the en-
lightenment Of those who do not, will ex-
plain that shopping is fine art, which like
all its sister arts is more or less easily ac-
quired according to native talent. The am
ateur shopper, miserable failure COM
pounded OF indifference and temerity, will
glide into a store, with a startled look on her
faee and only a vague idea in her mind of
what she wants; asks for il, looks at it,
prices il, pays for il, and departs in haste, if
not in peace, 10 discover when she reaches
home hat she has bought precisely what she
did not want. II is not for such as these
| that those stools are planted with
an Immortality which, at times,
seems to impsrt itself to their occupants.
| The professional enters store with gene
| raj suggestion Of, ''See the conquering hero
i comes" in her aspect as she bears down upon
i the point of attack. Settling herself with
wriggle Of satisfaction upon the stool nearest
the point Of siege, she will lay her parasol
and bag down with a strategic flourish that
conveys the idea of invincibility more forci-
bly, than volumes OF words. With the FIRST
iniimation of her wants the belesguered
party is made to understand that she is
better Judge of fabrics ard qualities thsn
any man or woman that ever did stand be.
hind counter. She will look at q bolt of
plain white domestic with a searching Sc
verify calculated 10 superinduce voluntary
confession on the part OF the culprit on the
stoolless side, comprising an exhaustive
record Of that bolt Of domestic, extending
back to the location of the cotton field tn at
produced the raw material. She will pull it
and pinch it with, vicious enjoyment Of its
frail,ies, convincing you with one whitening
glance that you are only in the primer Of a
branch of learning that she has received her
diploma for. 1t it is useless to try to
deceive the professional as 10 quality,
it is criminal folly TO try to impose
upon her in the matter of prices. She
knows as well as if she had every invoice of
the concern in her pocket how much profit
you are m aking over cost price, and is not at
all difident in her efforts TO convict you of
extorlion. To be skilled "jewer-down" is
one of the essential qualifications of the
professional. 1t is none of your business Il
mean you on the oollesss side) if she does
not want but two yards of domestic; it is
your duty TO fling down every bolt on your
we'll CT ahmed shelvesj for how can she tell,
/ should like to know, that the exact quality
requisite for her peace of mind is not en-
bodied in the very last bolt you bring to her
unerring inspection, and she could not enjoy
mouthful at the well-appoInted supper
table, at which she will probably be seated
before her victim has well gotten through
with rearranging his empty shelves, il there
was lingering doubt left as to whether she
had secured those two yards from the very
bolt at the very lowest price. "Time is made
for slaves" somebody tells US, but it is a
matter of no consideration to the profession.
al shopper, and you surely would not have
her gauge its value for people who are
paid for it! There is every indi.
cation about her that closing hour is
approaching, but as the most thoroughly ex-
hausted clerk is not likely to issue writ of
tjectment against her, the professional con-
tlnues her pursuit Of those two yards with
unruffied serenity. To be sure she did leave
home Immediately after o'clock dinner,
but then there never was a woman who had
as much to get through with in such short
space of time. She had to 60 TO the art
store 10 change that picture frame she
bought, forgetting that purple velvet would
not go with green wall paper, and it took her
full half an hour TO Jew that wreched dealer
important enough 10 say should have been a
matter of consideration before, not after,
purchase. Then who should che meet Just
as she reached Blanks book store but some
body that she was just dying to see; and
while she stepped in to say one word to her,
while she was buying bottle of ink, she
got to looking at the satchels and pspeterie
in the showcases; not that she had any in
tention of purchasing, for she didn't need
any, and she is the last woman in the world
to throw money away senselessly, but there
is no harm in posting oneself in prices, SO
that when she does want them she will be
able to compare Blank with his rival up the
street; and, indeed, what are all those idle,
gocd-fof- nothing clerks for If one dare not
ask question or two? II is really astonish-
ing how time slips away when one
gots to looking at things. So gliding
from papeterie to bon-bons, she Just
steps into confectionery long enough 10
get something to make the children for
get that broken promise about staying
away from them only ten minutes. Ridicu-
lousi As il she could get through under
seventy times seven that timel But if she
does not come down town to see about the
groceries and the shoe bills, and to remind
Mr.. X. that the coal is nearly out, and to ask
him if he saw the gas man about the hall
fixtures, and-and to get little more change
from him, she would like to knowwhat would
become of them all. So, mentally commit
ting The little folks at home to the protection
of that special providence which is said to
have charge of children, drunkards and the
United States" she applies herself to the
last duty of the day, the purchase of the
aforesaid two yards OF domestic "Nothing
more, m ada mp asks the exhausted servitor
on the stoolless side, ss my lady rises and
draws her fpr-lined pelisse about her shout
ders with the complainant satisfaction OF
duty performed. "No, believe not. Oh!
yes-well, did want some thread, but 10.
morrow will do for that" So with this
tacitly expressed ito be continued" she
hastens homeward through the gathering
darkness, remcrsefully specializing as to the
chances Of finding the children all right.
All the time 1 expended on this piece OF
fancy mental sketehirg was being industri-
J ou.ly "put in'' by my friend, who was still in
anxious consultation with a sweet-faced girl
across the counter over half dozen paste.
board boxes, whose contents had been reck.
lessly thrown into 'pi" 10 a profession.
al search for half yard OF valencienne
lace that must be just so wide and no wider
Sill closer TO my stool was another girl
sorting with deft-patient Singers the bright.
hued contents of big silk handkerchief BOX
She looked, oh SO tired, and her task looked
oh! SO hopeless; and l asked, oh, so imper
tiueDtly: aid one purchaser produce all
that wild confusionT "Yes'm,m answered
this modern Penelope. With a never-ending
task. ''She was a little hard to please
Some of the ladies are, you know" "Don'
you get very much out>of patience with wo
men, sometimes7" asked, recklesly. She
looked At me over the tumbled heap OF silk
neckwear as if she suspected my very recent
importation from the rural districts
and answered with angelic patience: sob
no; some Of the girls get pretty well irritatec
some days, but l am blessed with temper
that helps me not 10 mind" slow long dc
you have TO stand behind that counter?'
L went on. aWe come at halfpa Eve and
go at six; but We are paid well for it and are
thankful that such avenues are open 10 us.
L did not have the impertinence mot having
arrived at the digni,y Of q full.hedged re.
Porterl 10 ask her how long an interim wal
granted for feeding purposes; but when ]
thought OF the gentle dignity, the unfailips
patience, the sweet serenity th at one 90 often
Gees on the stoSlless side of the counter