The Sunday herald. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1866-1887, 1883-03-04
uispe Gets Roxed.

NNAH y y NNNN hhWANWs
4" You don't want to buy good parrot, do
you, " said the bad hoy 10 the grocery man, as he
put his wei mttens on the TOP " the stove 70 Any,
and kept his back 10 tho stove 50 he could watch the
grocery MAJ and he prepared lot 4 Kick n tho man
should remember tho rotten egg sign that the hoy
put up In front Of the grocery last week.
& bo G99 n want ,5 mo ns,o , "a" wsa
tho matter with your mas parrot thought she
wouldn't part with him for anything
''Well, she wouldn't until wednesday night
but now she says she will not have him around, and
may have half can got for him. She told me 10 go
10 some saloon, or some dlsrepuable place and sell
him, and thought may I've ho would about uityou,
and the boy broke open bunch Of celery and took
out few tender stalks and rubbed them on COD
sh, to salt them, and began to bite the stalks, while
ho held the sole of wet boot up against the stovo
to dry II, making smell OF burned leather tat came
near turning the stomach of the cigar Sign
"Lookaheto, boy, don't you call this dlsroputR-
BILE place Some " the best people In this town come
here, v said the grocery man, as no held up tne
cheese knife and grated his teeth rs though he woud
like TO Iab II into the youth.
90, that's all right They come here cause You
trust. But you make un what you lose by charging
II to other people. IA viii make II hot Tor you the
last Of the week He has been looking over your b,
and comparing II with tho hired girl aud she says
we haven't ever had nrunc, or adtied apple, OF
raiscn, auy cinnamon, or crackers and cheese Ont
of you store and he says you arc worse than thc
James brothers. aud that you used to bc threccard"
monte man, and no will have you arrested for high.
way robbery. But you can settle that with pa,
You high toned, gcntemanly sort OF blk, and
wouldn't take anything you couldn't MT. on, Keep
your seat. and don't get excited. II doesa man good
To hear the truth from one who has got the nerve to
tell IT,. But about the parrot. Ma has been away
from home for week, having hlgh ola Time IN
was gone guess the hired girl or somebody learned
the parrot things 10 say, parrot that
can only say Polly want'sa cracker don't amount
to anything. what need W the new style parrots
that the topics oftheday and say things
original, Well when ma got back guess her con-
science hurt her for the she had been carrying on
IN Chicago, and 80 when she heard the basement OF
tho clutch being ffescOed she invited the COM
mitee to hold tho wednesday evening prayer meet
ings ut our house. Fltst, there were four people
came, and ma asked pa to stay and make up
quorum, and IA said seeing he had two pair, he
guess he would stay In, aud N ma would deal him
queen he would have full hand. don't Know
what pa meant hut he plays draw poker
sometimes, Anyway, there was eleven
after they had talked about the nelghhors spell aud
ma had showed the women u new tidy she had worked
| for the heather, with motto on II which pa had
taught her, conrlte heart beats STALLED flush,
aud had talked to the men about religious slVet
"a friend TO buy Tor the glory Of the church. they all
went In the back patlor aud the minister led nnayeI
lie got down On HIS knees right under the parrot
cage, aud you'd dide to see Polly hang on TO the
wires OF the cage with foot and drop mn apple core
on the minister's head. Ma shook her handkerchief
| at Folly, and looked sassy, and Polly got mp on the
perch and as the minister got warmed M, and began
| to raise the roof, Polly said, 'oh, dry up. The
minister had his eyes shut but he opened one OF them
little and looked atpa. Pawas tickled at the parrot,
but when the minister looked at VA as though u was
him that making irrevcrent remarks, pa was mad
|
self aud said What You giving us, aud the minister
got up aud brushed the bird seed of his knees aud he
| looked mad. ! thought ina would sink with mori'h
cation and was sitting on plano stool LOOKING as
pious as q Sunday school superintendent the sunday
before he sklps out with the bank funds ana nal0okel
as though she thought II was me that had been
| tamperlng with the parrot. Gosh, never said u
word to that parrot, and can prove 1t by my chum
| Well the minister asked one ot tho sisters II She
wouldn't pray, and she WASH engaged, SO she SAID
with pleasure, ana she kneeled down, but she corkr
herself cause she GOT one knee on uumDoe
| that had been practicing with. She said ION my
In disguised sort of u way, and then she began To
pray for the reformation OF the youth o the lan ana
particularly on the boy that was such care and hN
cty to his parents and lust then folly sad oh'nu
down your vest. Wen, you'd dide to see that
woman look at me. The parrot cage was parity be-
hind the window curtain and they couldn't see II,
| and she thought ~ was me. She looked AT ma as
though she was wandering why she didn't hit me with
poker, but she went on, and Polly said, Wipe oil
your chn and then the lady got through anu got un,
and told ma II must lie great trial Ia nave an idiot
child, and then ma she was mad and said " WASH
halt So bad as " was tn he u kcptomahidc, AMI then
! the woman got up and said she wouldn't stay ~
longer pa said to to take that parrot doors,
and that seemed to make them AL good naluredagaih:
Ma said to take the parrot AMI give II to the poor
took the cage and pointed my finger ~ tue parrot an
| 1t looked at the woman and said old c,taramatah
and the woman tried TO look pious ana resigned, bn
she couldn't AS was going out the door the parrot
ruifed NJ his feathers aud said Dammit, set em up
and hurried out with the cage for fear he would say
something bad, and the folks all held up their hands,
AMI said IL was srandaous. say, wonder " parin
put tho parrot IN the wOUdShed and after they al
had their innings, except pa, who acted rs UMPIRE th'
meeting broke up aud ma says ~ the last time Sh'
viii have that gang 1T her house.
| ''rhat must have been where your pa got his hacR
eye, " said the grocery man. as he charged tue onnrl
Of celery to the boys father. " Did the munster hi
him, or was II one of the sisters. y
''Oh, he didn't get his black eye at prayer meet
Ing - said the boy. rs ho took his initens OF the
stove and rubbed them to take the stliTenng out
- II was from boxing. Ia told my chum and NJ,
that 1t harm 10 learn TO i,oS, cause we coult
daft md MIR lyng a a. "a
terror with the boxing gloves when he was a boy
and he has been giving us lessons. Well, lie Is NJ
SLOUGH, now tell you, and handles himself pretty
| well FOR a church member. | read In the paper how
Mace, the prize fighter, to knock him silly, aud
asked pa II he wOudn' let me bring poor boy witt
had no father to teach him boxing to our house Il
learn to box, and pa said certainly, fetch him along
orphan. SO went down In the Third Ward aud gn
an Irish boy by the name OF Duffy, who can knocl
the socks of OF any boy In the ward. lie Mt priz
fight once. 1t would have made you laugh to see ~
tell him how to hold his hands and how to guard hi
face. lie told Duffy not to lie afraid, but to stik
right out and hit for keeps. Duy said he was afra
pa would get mad II he hit him, aud pa said, Non
sense, hoy. knock me down IL You can. and
Will laugh ha ha!' Well, Duty he hauled bac
aud gave pa In the and another In both eyes
and cuncd him on the ear aud punched nm In ~
stomach, and damned him In tho mouth aud mad
his teeth bleed and he gave him u st,ic windrr /
both eyes, and pa pulled off the boNug glove
and grabbad chair, and adjourned and wen
down stairs as though there WAS u pan'c. | haven
seen pa since. Was his eye very black ~
a. Black, should say SO, ~ said the grocery man
- Aud his nose seemed Ia he trying To look In hi
left ear. lie was at the market buying hecfsteak
put on It,.
nOh buersteak Is no account. / must go and &c
him and tell him that oyster is the best thing f.
a black eye. Well, must go. boy has a p,ett
hard time running house the way II should he run,
and the boy went out aud hung up sign In front
the grocery: ''Frowy Butter a Speshully. "-Peck'
Sun.