The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1883-12-08
HOTEL HOGS,
A Dissertation on the Subject b
a Sufferer.

1t is astonishing how much noise
people make in hotels who never
think of doing so in private houses.
Persons arriving at late hour 60
up to their rooms laughing. talking,
vociferating along the halls, waking
up the sleeping guests, and receiv-
ing maledictions from all the rooms.
People who rise early in the NOM
ing raise such a row in the process
of dressing as to drive sleep but of
every room in the neighborhood.
There was man in the room over
my head who was afflicted with
chronic trouble in getting on his
boots every morning. He stamped
on the floor about fifty times with
the right boot, and then about as
often with the left boot, and when
the job was satisfactorily accom-
plished walked about his room with
a heavy, triumphant tread that
shook the ceiling.
At the same hotel I made a note
of the events of night. At II
o'clock gentleman and his wife
we're shown to a room opposite to
mine. They talked loudly to the
boy. giving him all sorts Of orders,
and after be had gone to the end of
the passage the gentleman opened
the door and shouted to bring some
water, and explained that he didn't
want it hot, but lukewarm, and res
peated the order and explanations,
and doubtless reused out of sleep
every body in thirty or forty rooms.
Then followed a slam of his door,
and then conversation and differ
ence of opinion between himself
and wife, which was audible, every
word of it, to most of the people he
had awakened out Of their sleep.
When that room became quiet
and people were possibly
asleep again, came roaring
down all the passages of the
hotel loud laughing, talking, and
some profanity from number Of
men who had been in the billiard
room and were now breaking up
their party. They went up the
grand stairway two or three stories,
shouting as they went, and woke
the whole hotel on every floor.
It was after midnight when a
party of ladies and gentlemen who
had been out sailing by moonlight
came in, in the very best of spirits.
and as they went along the halls
made the house ring with voices
that were very sweet and would
have been musical under other cir
cumStances. Two of the ladies babe
the others goodnight, and received
a hearty goodnight with abundant
pleasant good wishes for sleep in
English and German and came down
the passage talking about some
thing that had happened, and ex
pressing confdentially to each other
their opinion of some of the gentle
men. This confidence was bestowed
on some dozens of persons besides
myself.
1t was about 2 o'clock when /
settled myself to sleep, and [ had
been asleep about five minutes when
two gentlemen were shown into the
room next to mine. They had been
attending consultation between
representatives Of some railroads.,
and it had been a stormy time.
No one had succeeded in getting
the advantage OF any one else. l
heard all about it. l made noise
myself to show them that they were
talking for public benefit. They
would not take the hint, and
I was compelled to hear
not only what the sharp
fellows of the other roads had tried
and failed to get, but also what my
neighbors themselves intended to
have, and how they intended to get
it. Several other people heard the
same. No one in that part of the
house could help hearing it. When
you talk secrets at night in hotel,
built of wood, remember to whisper.
Toward morning departing guests
by a very early train reused the
house by five o'clock. 1t is perfectly
easy to get up, dress. and go out of
hotel without making noise. Few
people think of doing it. At six
o'clock came very common
nuisance. A mother who likes to
sleep quietly has her children up
and dressed and sends them out to
play in the hall, while she goes to
sleep again. 1t was the fourth
morning the nurse had brought
those children down to my
end of the hall, and
this time I requested her to take
those children down some other
hall andiwake some one. She went. l
am aware of the inconsistency of my
conduct, but when you cannot abate
a nuisance there is a certain fair
ness in compelling the other mem
bers of the community to relieve
you of a share of it. 1t was o'clock
tbot tho mon with tho h0Otc bnrop