Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1883-10-24

though expressing surprise that the publication
had been as great as it was, says that the expe-
rlments afford abundant proof that we ought
not to tolerate the indiscrminate collection of
| ice.
| Wednesday waggeries.
$50 your husband is contractor. In what
| particular line ia hep" "In the debt line" SIN
the debt line3" eyes. he has contracted about
3d. worth of debts during the last two years.
everybody says he is very successful in his bust
ness. Boston Transcript
Galveston school teacher had great deal
| OF trouble making a boy understand his lesson.
Finally, however, he succeeded and drawing a
long breath remarked to the boy: eff it wasn't
for me you would be the biggest donkey on the
Galveston Island"
young man having asked girl if he might
60 home with her from singing class and been
| refused, said: you're as full of airs as a mu-
steal box" "Perhaps So" she retorted; "but' if
1 am don't go with crank"
| Texas debating society debated the ques-
ton: when watermelon vine runs on to an
| other mans land who owns the melons? The
referee decided that the colored man who lived
about mile and half from the two farms
owned the melOns-Peck's Sun.
physician said loosely to policeman one
evening: 81 always feel safe when l see police
man IN the evening. for there is no danger
about" Eyes, safer than feel when have a
doctor about, was the bright retort.
crusty old fellow once asked, 'What is the
| reason that griffins, dragons and demons are
ladies' tavorite subjectsfor embroidery designs?"
"Ah, it is because they are continually thinking
| OF their husbands!' was the quick retort.
The Zuni Indians are said to have invented
| the cigarette. We begin to believe that there is
indeed no good Indian but a dead Indian.
Many woman who does not know even the
multiplication table can figure" in society,"
| 1Onhers Statesman.
Got your stove-pipe up? How are the '.jints"
this fall? Does the chimney draw? Swear much
during the job aloud or otherwise?
Applicant for life insurance: sDoes your COM
pany permit one to cross the ocean?' Agent:
"Oh. yes; you can cross the ocean or 90 up in a
balloon if you want to; but you will not be al
io"ed 10 practlse on flute near an open win
dow."-Philadelphi Gail.
$50 you really think the young man who oc-
cupled the seat with you stole your watch?"
Eyes. SIR" ''Why do you think SOP" Because
ne sat 80 close and pressed up to me- 'And
why did you allow it," Because-because-I
thought he was making love to me."-Frona the
German.
to keep the matter secret. l have employed q
detective to ferret it out. "-Boston Post.
The principal order of architecture is IN order
Tor another SlO,O for necessary changes in the
original plan.
Nilsson says PATHS voice holds out remarka-
oily well for woman of her age Patti only
hopes she may be able to sing ais well as Nilsson
when she is as old. Gerster remembers the
pleasure both these singers gave her when she
was little grl.-Neso Orleans Picayune
A dentists appearance is apt to deceive one,
The more he looks down in the mouth the better
he feels.-Philadelphia Call
Little Rock man found cake OF sOap and
for days carried it as a curiosity, as nobody
could tell what it was.-Boston Post.
Its weigh have" remarked the butcher
as he let his hand rest on the scales while weigh
ing the meat oil City Blizzard
''If am not at home from the party tonight
at 10 o'clock, said a husband to his better and
bigger half, don't wait for me-" THAT I
won't" replied The lady significantly; 81 won't
wait, but IN come for YOU" The gentleman
returned at ten o'clock precisely.
Henry George recently lost 400 pages of manu-
script on free trade. which he vas about to pub
fish in book form. Thus does q wise Providence
interfere and send CLEAN OF sunshine through
the black horrors OF the year.-Norristown
Herald.
De bow-laig man doan stan so well in 'sciety
as udder men, but he amt alters de most worth
less. Sometimes de benchlaig fee kills de coon
arter all de udder dogs hab been fit off-Arkan-
saao Traveller.
"Can your wife driver" one somerville man
asked Of another. Drive what?" "Drive a
horse, of course" "Drive horse! Why man.
she can not drive nail"
Young Lady (who is writing note for the
housemaid)-"ls there anything more you wish
to say, .""No marin, except just say: Please
excuse bad writin' and spellin'.'
Come away from dat straw stack chile"
called negro woman to her son. "Fust thing
yer know yer'll hab de hay fever. Doan yer
put none oh dat straw in yer mouf."-Teras
Sif1ings.
At an academy bal masque, the other night. a
jolly French girl said to her partner: ''You like
to waltz, monsieur" 81 adore it," "Then
why did you never learn2'
Let us play we were married." said little
Edith, land Will bring my dolly and say, See
baby, papa" 'Yes," replied johnny. land I
win say, Don't bother me now; want to look
Fifteen genuine Sioux Indians. who are see
Ing Gotham, amuse the people at hotel by
eating with their hands and dressing outland.
ishly: AS they wear silk hats they think they
are civilized. This is very common mistake
among other people besides Indians.-LoueU
Citizen.
He'd been waltzing with his hosts ugly elder
ages. He he was espied by his would-be papa
in.law. "She is the flower of m y family, SIR
said the latter. $50 it seems" answered the
young man. "Pty she comes off 80, amt it,"
rub at the white spots on his coat sleeves '4'
A man who made large fortune by collecting
and selling garbage has just died at San Fran
cisco. The remarkable thing about this case is
that he stayed in San Francisco to die instead of
coming east, buying q mansion on 5th avenue,
Kew York, and teaching his children to turn up
their noses at people who are Tin trade."-Phil-
ddelphid Times.
Farmer Wurzle (meeting the curate's wife, who
Is bee-keeper): mo, mum; I've no call to find
any fault WI your bee-keepin,' but do wish as
they 'oodn't light on my clover. found one O.
my sheep stung in his mouth this morning"
Curates wife (naively): "And Dray Mr. Wurzle
where would You look for its tongue but In its
mOuth?"-Judu