The Emporia weekly news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1881-1889, 1883-04-26
here AND THERE.

or like Carter Harrison, gas in Chicago
should be higher than in St. Louis.
Maple saffy socials are in vogue at To
peka- This must be extremely discout-
aging 10 the snti-glneose editor of the
Capital.
The Atchison Champion advocates
the culture of hops in Kansas. Col
Martin seems to be fixed in his hostility
to the policy of prohibition.
A wise man of Athens says friendship
is like good eoffee-when once It has
become cold. ii cannot be warmed again
without losing its first SAVIOR.
Atchison Champion: A strange com
bination of prsyerful attitude and
cursefnl mind may be found in the man
taking up carpets for spring cleaning.
A manufacturer of ported meats has
been arrested IN London for using don
keys flesh in his business. The popu'
larity of the "Ohio idea" seems to Be
gradually waning.
Several Kansas journalists, with .
consuming thirst for travel, have put 70
soak their galvanized watches and last
winters listers preparatory to the pro-
posed editorial jauut to chihuahua.
Lord Pelmers,on. on being asked
when a man was in the prime of life"
promptly answered, 40" It is true
that widowers of that ago are generally
more anxious to marry than at any
period in their lives.
The prohibition convention called to
meet at Louisville on the 10Th inst, has
been abandoned. We thought when we
first read of this contemplated temper
ance uprising in Kentucky that it was
too big joke TO hold together.
Salt Lake City has one hundred and
fifty acres of public parks. We may
observe, in this connection without any
disparagement of the Edmunds bill,
that it requires considerable room for a
citizen of Utah TO take his family out
for an airing.
The expansive smiles of the alligators
down in Florida brought so vIvidly to
the presidents mind the unctuous coun.
tenances of the Office seekers by whom
he is constantly surrounded at Washing.
ton, that he only gained half pound
in weight during his sojourn in that
state.
A compulsory educational law has
just been enacted by the Legislature OF
Rhode Island This measure seems to
have been necessitated by the pernicious
habit into which the children of that
state have fallen of ''scootiDg" over into
Connecticut and Massachusetts during
school hours.
The Kansas City Times, with charac-
teristic enterprise, sent a reporter to in
terview Charles Francis Adams upon
the occasion of his recent visit to that
place, which only goes to prove that the
mercury gets down lower than poll
tIcian in a ward canvass when that truly
metropolitan journal gets left.
The announcement is made that E.
Stone Virgins, the meteorological fiasco
of Canada, is about 10 start on a lectur-
ing tour. It is a matter of common OBJ
servation that when a man IN this coun-
try turns out to be bowling failure at
every thing else he promptly proceeds
TO vent his spleen upon an unoffending
public by taking the rostrum.
An Indiana clergyman rode on horse
back distance of six miles to marry a
couple. As he was starting for home a
coin was given him. When he got home
he looked at it, and it was an fash
toned copper cent The next morning
the groom appeared at his door, and
having explained with considerable em-
barrassmtnt how the annoying mistake
had been made, took back the cent and
handed the clergyman quarter.
1t Is feared the newspaper reporters
privileged TO accompany the presiden-
tial expedition to the jungles of Flor
ida, are disposed to draw upon their
imaginations largely in writing about
the solid enjoyment" of the party. Elk
tracts from private letter are published
which convey the information that the
thermometer has averaged SO degrees
in the shade, while the mosquitoes are as
large as bumblebees, the sand full OF
fleas, the fishing poor, the orange season
over and the country generally damp,
mslirious and forbidding. We are glad
now our invitation was declined, with
thanks.