The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1883-08-10
WHOLE NO. 73E
WHY WE LAUGH.
The turn of the "tied"-starting home
ward after the wedding trip.-Derrick.

The turn of the "tled"-starting home
ward after the wedding trip.-Derrick.
What's in name9 Well, II Its Russian
name we should answer, the alphabet.
Press.
A little girl Is reported in Harper's Bazar
as believing that NJ. ID. after doctors name
means money down."
A boy says 10 his composition "onions are
the vegetables that make you sick when you
don't eat them yourself."-Arkansas Horse
shoe.
Yennor, the Canadian weather crank, pro-
phesied .'intense electrical manifestations"
for July 10Th. And the telegraphers strike
came.
"Where Is the girl of long ago." sings
Joaquin Miller. We saw her the other day
Josq. But she isn't q girl any more. She
had gray hair and wsrt on her nose, had
10 teeth and wore specs.
A famous North Carolina clergyman, while
preaching few Sundays ago from the text:
"He giveth his beloved Sleep" stopped in
the middle Of his discourse, gazed upon his
slumbering congregation and said: "Breth-
which the Lord appears to have for q large
portion of my auditory"
"She thirsted for one fond look-and star
we'd for kiss denied" says Ella VIII eler in
one of her poems. Poor thing! In these
DAYS when "fond looks" are flying all about
from every street corner, and "kisses" are
not denied when anybody knows where they
are wanted, IT Is too bad. We have heard Of
"starviug TO death in the midst of plenty"
The poor creature seems TO be trying 1t on
Hartford Post.
freshened by July sun, were Just throwing
their symphony OF color on the mosquito
conopy that hung in limp and graceful folds
about the couch of Rosalind McGush of
Gushville, the birds in the Linden tree that
daintily brushed the window panes with Its
limbs were csroiing 1--WE think caroling the
proper word) forth their overture to the gild
ed opening Of day, the kline had been drain
ed OF their lacteal usefulness and were mean
dering down the lane in search of the weak
est spot in the pasture fence and all nature
seemed TO be getting ready TO celebrate. The
bright light of the morning kissed open the
eyelids of Rosalind McGush and she yawn.
ed gracefully as she murmured, "How sweet
the fragrant brea' Of early day!" just then
q voice came with reverberating echo up The
back stairs, filling all the house aud making
the welkip beneath its shingles ring with
harsh unpleasant ring, "Rosy ROsy!! The
wash biler's on an the breakfasts stun cold"
Twas enough. In less than Two hours Rosa
lind McGush was in the back yard with
seven clothes pins between her teeth, hang
ing out the wash.-HdrDord Post.
In some of the backwoods districts of Mis-.
sonri the amenities of journalism are not
strictly observed. The Marble Hill Refec
tor refers to It's local rival as follows: The
ignorant, contemplate, mean, snaaking, cow
ardly, self important, low-1ung, dirty, out
landish, back biting, self styled politician,
dead beat, log.cabin child Of misfortune,
whisky bloat, backwo DIS hummer, beer in.
fated, big beaded, soft skUlled, Overrated
swamp angel who claims TO edit the swamp
paper. lhinks the edttOsnf the Reflector ter.
rihlv ignorant LFt him ."Ok at The twenty
seven mistakes in his last issue; let him re-
meIc ber the blatant In the issue beforehand
let him not forget that he used 'ardorous' for
.arduous' IN leading local in his issue Of
August 24th. Oh, you dirty whelp. you poor,
crawling, creeping viper; you dirty scum OF
the dirty, sinking, stsgnated swamp; you
mean, big jSwed, slab sided, knock kneed,
how. legged. hsnGered .sbanked pup; lost as
Won are to honesty, To principle, 10 justice,
- common decency, DO you imagine you can
rule Gods country--tbe hills. Go back into
the cesspool from which you crawled and
there remain. Don't come ont Of your den
to abuse respectable people. Go TO school, /,
Kelly, and you may learn something yet"
KellY's reply Is awaited with in,erest.-Bos'
ton Post.