National Republican., 1883-02-20


mind me how the last one went
And that the rain will spoil my beaver
And gravely answer, 1t is lent"
WAGNER knows all about the music Of tho
future now.
A SOUTH CAROLINA editor hung himself
the other day. Now is the time to subscribe.
PETER COOPER has been working hattor,
brickmaker, coachmaker, machinist. and glue.
maker.
SOME philanthropist ought to start q homo
for aged eggs, and thus keep them out Of the
market.
A GENTLEMAN only thirty years old mar
ried his fourth wife at Woodbury. Tenn, q few
days ago.
IN Siberia wife can be bought for eight
dogs. In Georgia this would amount to the snug
sum ofSs,000-ARdntd Consultation.
AN exchange says it makes woman sick
TO keep a secret. He must have guessed it., as II
has never yet been put to practical test
THE Romans used to eat pics, but IL was
death to sneak In tin plate on a Roman when
he was biting through thirteen Of them at once.
SIX hundred criminals were pardoned from
the Chicago Blidewell last year. 1t means some
thing when Chicago man says, " Beg pardon"
Miss SUSAN B. ANTHONY is good looking,
modest, sensible, learned, and, in society, some
what timid lady, whose years have brought honor
to her
PAsTEUR, Of germ theory fame, says 1t is
dangerous TO kiss any one who is fasting Moral.
Always treat your girl to ice cream early in the
evening"
PROF. TIcE predicted the floods in Ohio,
and feels so big over 1t that he pays nothing less
than a quarter for street car fares He waited
until 1t had rained for three days. and then pre-
dicted.
SOMETHING strange: His sExcellency-"You
have brothers?" Captain-"One, Your Excel
lency." His Excelency-"Its curious. was
talking with your sister and she said she had ttpo
brothers. How is that2"
Young lady: "Isn't this child little
Frenchman !" Nurse: "I cannot tell; the father
| is o German, the mother French" Young lady;
"Ah, then we shall not be able to find out unit
| the little fellow can speak"
AN Englishman shooting small game In
| Germany, said to his host that there was spice
| Of danger in shooting in America. "Ahl" said
| the host you like danger NIT your sport Then
| you go out shooting NIT me. The last time shoot
mine bruder-in-law In the schtomack."
ANGELICA BELLEVUE: "And do you 10 ok
so much like your brotherY Augustus Belettre:
| "Dromio of Ephesus looked not more like the
Dromio of Syracuse" Angelica Bellevue: "I
beg your pardon, what is the name of your
| friend In syiacuse2 have q cousin In Syra-
| cuse"
NJ. LIE VIcoMPTE D'HAUssoNvILLE, who
has written book on America, says that even
the third rate papers in the United States bet
ter than the leading journals OF Paris. With earn
estness he adds that the so.and-so (meaning o
disgraceful police weekly is not found on the
| tables Of ladies in good society"
WAGNER is dead, Won Bulow is in an insane
asylum, and poor List the Oldest and most en-
thusastic of the great trio of apostles of tho music
of the future, is lying at his home In physical
decay. Lizst had daughter who married Won
Bulow and eloped with Wagner, but anerward
was divorced from the former and married the
latter without disturbing the friendly harmony
| Of the coterie In the least
THE women of New York. according to the
Spectator, are terribly overdressed, and the mena
faces sad and preoccupied: but how could 1t be
otherwise2 asks the New York World. "Tks London
women will not communicate the secret Of their
own exquisite taste In costume, and the men OF
New York have never recovered from the shock
they experienced when II was first made clear to
thom that they had not been born in England"
DURING the deluge at Louisville, as de-
scribed in Thursdays Commercial, every other
chimney In the submerged district wns mounted
by a sereeching cat At Cincinnati one of tho
strangest sights the armies of rats driven from
innumerable cellars, swimming and floating down
through the streets into the waste of waters below.
Let those hungry cats, cinging to the Louisville
chimney tops be OF good cheer. Provisions are
on the way,
THE spooks of Tennessee are trying TO
make themselves useful. There is one that up
pears at a house in Hamilton county of that state
regularly every evening, and rocks the cradle
whenever the infant cries. The parents of the
child were very much alarmed at first, but have
now lost all fear, and anticipate the nightly arri-
| vail Of he saIlgflQ-
ton. There are some families In Chicago that
would welcome such ghosts with pleasure
AMONG other curiosities Of the census re-
turns for the northwest province of India 1t ap-
pears that those provinces contain 1,lOO actors,
5000 ballad singers lag healers by incarnation, 83
gamblers, 81 snake charmers, so match makers, 4
poets, 10, 900 singers and dancers, story teers,
and thieves. The cultivators OF the soil number
seven and half millions. the landholder 10000,
and the money lenders 10000 only7 thieves to
, 10000 bankesl Here is an opening for the pro-
fessional thieves Of Europe and America that
ought to be we'll advertised.
THE following lines may be repeated as
keepsake for all those who expect at any future
period to teach our expressive language to the
heather;
"wrte, we know, is written right,
When we see itwritten write.
But when we see 1t written wright,
We know II is not written right.
D For write, to have II written right
Must not be written right, nor rite,
Nor yet must 1t be written wright
a But write for so It's written right"
s The monument to Alexander Dumas, the
, execution of which was given TO Gustave Dore, Is
q entirely completed 1t is composed of high ped
estal on the top of which tho author Of "The
Three Musketeers' is represented sitting with un.
covered head in an attitude of meditation, which
i does not detract from the habitual expression
# his open and sympathetic physlognomy. Upon the
steps Of The pedestal the artist has placed life
size group of three persons representing young
woman holding an open book and two young
y lads, one of whom overlooks the volume, while
o the other listens attentyely. 1t is said to bo u
Is very effective work.
,s A METHODIST church at Westheld, Mass,
{, planned supper. to be followed by an amateur
,e dramatic performance, and sold tickets industn.
W ously at 81 each. The play chosen was Box and
Cox" which was critically read by the pastor,
who found no harm in It. But some Of the actors
fell III at the last moment and II was thought that
the whole entertainment would have to be post.
- | but N drauuntto Iu