davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
Hints Abont Reading,

II is one thing to have u desire to
read and quite another to know what
to read; the shelves of our libraries,
packed tier above tier, discourage rath.
er than stimulate one who has not
gained birds eye view of literature
aud learned what he can leave unread.
One book at time is the rule for the
scholar no less than for the beginner,
and one book at time is never dis.
cOuragipg. 1t is mistake to begin
with theory; there is great danger of
dying Of it. Begin by reading what in
tefests you; il you want to cultivate
yourself and yet have not formed the
habits and tastes ofan orderly reader,
do not attack Grote or Hume, but take
something that can be read with pleas
IRE. 1t is better to begin with poor
novel and end with Macaulay than to
begin with Matthew Arnold and never
get beyond him. Most people exhaust
themselves on plan which includes as
many books a. a good library; Rollin
and GibbOn have slain regiments OF
possible readers. Ii is an immense adj
vantage TO row with the current; it is
easy enough to read when the book in
terests you. If novels hold your atten-
ton, by all means begin with novels,
but bc careful that you move upward,
and not in a circle. Improve the quail
ity Of your selections; Try historical
romance, and you will be an eXcep.
tionai person if "lvanhoe," or lily
patia,n or "ROmola," or the "CloiSter
and the Hearth" do not beget in you
desire to read history for its own sake,
and sufficient interest in the reading
TO carry you along.
If you have taste for biography,
read J. :. &. AhboLt's olives" and you
will find yourself ready to enjoy IRE
velyan's "Macaulay," Irving's "Colum-
bus" Carlyle's STERLING, Lounsbury's
Cooper" or SANKEY'S "Arno!d." fla
narrative interests you, do not attack
the great histories, but begin with Vol
taire's Charles Kill" Macaulay's his
tOrical essays, Green's "Short History
of the English People," it is only the
trained reader WHO can face Gr0te or
Bancroft without a cowardly sinking of
the heart. II you find it easy TO ead
about the habits, manners and peculi-
'arities of people, there are plenty of
cosby books that will lead you up To
BosTell's johnson" and Lockhart's
"Scott." In a word, begin reading by
selecting books that are easy for you to
resd.-H w. Mubie in Christian Union.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20

fully and get such an idea. The ,"n.
insn,s carse mas no better friends aud
stauDoher Supporters than the intelli,
gent men Of this nation. Instead oil
hating them / have the greatest graft.
tude and affection for them. cannot
at all conceive how men and women
can hate each other. Such condition
would be unnatural and would prove
that the person entertaining the feeling
must be possessed o an unsound mlnu.
There Is class Of men, most OF them
very ignorant and selfish. whom sLlke
now and them but do not etriHe thst
i,tster and nobier class who are able TO
recognize the claims of women, aud TO
stand out for their enjoying equal priyi-
lodges with themselves. Is this enough;
or do sou want me to give myself away
completely by saying that l iOre the
men better than the women.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
A silent Partner.

Atsupper one evening Mr.. Topne'dy,
after praising his wiie's fine biscuits
and good coffee, began 10 talk on mum.
clpal affairs, In hopes that Mn. 7.
would take q hand, and she did.
my dear" he said, edo you know
the city Ii going to appropriate 81 ,op.-
600 to clean and repair the streets"
81 did zee nee something Of an ap'
preparation, or whatever you call u,
and u man named ingalls,, but thought
1t WAS something going on IN Congrns,
or the Senate, or cabinet, or some
tbing?"
81 believe so, but this matter il right
here mt home, and am glad ~ see the
pro.pect Of al era of reform and clesnli'
ne-s, because we need II, not only IN the
streets, but everywhere else"
care you ready 70 do your share I'D
cleaning the city, TopnoodyT'
AYE, that | am, ready and Wiling.
more, lam eager to do my humbis
portion" and he swelled all up with
municipal patriotism.
every we'll, then, TOpnoody, go ogl
there In the hack yard and begin. IL.
too dirty 10 think Of, and Pve been o.
you ever since last spring to help your
poor, struggling wife In her Efforts 10
make your surroundings respec.soie
/ like to zee you men blow about clean
ing the streets when you leave yooI
wives to paddle around In ferry-b'sH
In their own backyards They are Ah
alike, TopnOody, and you are NOR,
alike, believe, than any OF the REV .,
them. Bah, mt your street-clesnihs
and your million.dollar appropristions'
when, nyour wives didn't make YOU:
you wouldn't even put on 3 clean rhif,
Oftener than once In three months !
like TO hear men talk, but don't wsn'
to hear anything from you, Topnooly
until you've disinfected thst BACK
yard" .uu,A
Tepnoody IL at present only a BILE"
primer.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
Rich CoIsred Mss - viSGis'"

Among the most prospeross COLOR, -
men in Richmond the following my
instanced: The Rev. James H",nsA
said 10 DO worth s. 900; Joseph r.. ~
rar, master builder. $1,000; " wss
Cooley, master builder, Si,Ng -
Richard Wells, 5000; Rev. "i WIN r.
Troy, g, 900; Rev. J. Jasper, S,NssS =.
Wilson, 1900; J. Turner & , s9n.,
90; Mr.. Hill, $4,000; VIM. Nilt ,ss,s
5000; Benjamin Smith, 2D " n
Wines, s5,o60; L. East, s2.C; w
Lyons. tarter, $4,000; r. Z. hou
barber, 81, goo. Most ofths m9oey -
invested In real estate. In 'aaIo,
ward there are more than lW cp n. n
people who own property SAy,ss
value from $500 10 5000, s ba al
twenty In Manchester. suI ,t.ocs
Richmond. One ofthe finest rs,' ..os.
in RiehniCnd IL owned BY Dr. fe I.yo,rs,
assistant Superintendent Of ths ' St sen.
,lemen conduct successful busine'
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
the DEAD WALTER

In her chamber the lady sleepeth,
Where streams the peaceful moonI
FIom will out strange music sweepeth,
As Of q vallz's tune.
"That waltz I'D mire IL vastly.
III see who's there" she aid:
Sbe locked out, and saw where . EhAsay
Skeleton ficdled and played.
TO waltz with me once you promised;
You've broken your pledge ma chere;
At the cLArL el 10 night a reception;
Il me, dearest, and dance with me there r.
Che could neither stay mr. answer,
Such SScii vsn over her thrJwnS
20 she followed the Il eleion dancer,
Who, hdding and singing. went on
Fiddlirg, ard dancing, and spinning
HE MUS in time 10 the tune,
With his white sknil bobbing and ptnnln.
| Horribly under the moon.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
An ARKANSAS DIALOGUE.
Cetsiur IafePmaffsn from . Hssavs
UnAer Dtmeaisses.
Arkasedw Tfardr.


UaAer DtAeafstes-
Arkansaw 1farfer.
81 do not see any peculiarly about
your people, said An Eastern Judge,
addressing lsis travelling companion, Q
well known Arkansas lawyer. ~ have
Travelled quite extensively In thisState,
and have not, as yet, found that eccen'
tricity of action and prevaricatson Of re-
Div that has often amused me In the
"You have done most Of cur travel
inx by rail.p the lawyer respooded.
"This Ia the first trip away from the
main reads, isit nets'
"Yes.n
"WeIl I'll show you some Of our gen.
uine naGyes Yonter is = house. Gan
tie landlord, and hold . conversation
with him."
"Hal;o!' cried the Judge.
"Comia'p the man replied, deposit
ing q child in the doorway. and advanc'
ing. m
Slows all the folkss"
"Cbi.dren's hearty; wi!e's not well.
Amt what you might call oed'sicK'
but Jess sOrter stretchy.' Al,
"Ciot anything to eat in the housei"
"Ef / had it anywhar. I'd have 1t in
the house"
Chow many children have your
MANY rs / want"
How many do you wants'
WANT hankerin' arter powerful
chance, Tut I'm satisfied"
"How long have you been living
here%
uToo Ionup
"How many years"
"Been here ever since my oldest boy
WAS born"
"What year was he bOrn~
"The year ] come here"
How old Is your boy?"
"Efhe had lived, he would have been
the oldest until yit; but, as he died Jims
the Oldest"
HE amt rs old as the one what
died" j.
"Well, how old WAS the one that
died?"
' "He was older than JIM" ,,
"What do you do here for hVine'
Eat"
"How do you get anything to cate"
"Best way We kim" 49,,
'HOw do you spenu your ounuaJe'
"l.ike the week days
"How do you spend them"
"Iike Sundays"
SIS that your daughter, yonder"
mo, sir; she amt my daughter yon-
der, nor nowhar' else"
sis she q relative ofyours"
"No, sir; no kin"
"Kin to your wife, / SUPPOSE"
NO kin to my wife, but she's kin to
my children"
HHow do you make that out"'
"She'S my WIFE"
GLOW far is il 20 the next house,"
ats called three miles, but the man
Wat calls it that is liar.
"Tve got enough" said the Judge!
turning to the lawyer. Drive on. !
pity the man who depends on this man
Tor information"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
FIREWORKS OUT WEST.
HsW Mr. EKbeAale saved His o. ,,,.
ana Roased' . damp 81 lud,s..

Hs~ M. E.besale saved H. o. . In.
asa Routed damp 81 isdiss.
Many years ago, says Bill Nv.
boomerang, when Denver didut hs,s
any opera house, aud the Rocky Moua.
tain country was the terra inco,.
nita Of the world. there wa.
dered oaN to the region A.
Fort Benton 0 man named ExbesdI.
Who made himself unpopular smons
the Shoyhones by killing some OF thss
most prominent men whenever he could
catch them away from home.
As result of this course ofprocedur.
Mr.. Exbeadle had large private ceme.
terry, and hostilities were declared hy
the tribe.
MIR. Exbeadle WAS . speculatcr, AND
one day fortune threw In his way 10:
of fireworks that didn't meet with .
ready sale and he purchased them.
more for his own amusement than sny.
thing else. These he put TO one side.
and didn't think of them again uatii
one day there was council OF war 10
the Shoshine tribe, at which il WAS re.
solved To extinguish the light OF Mr..
Exbeaile and sepd him across the my..
teries river.
They notified him that the intention
WAS to make him climb the golden stair
i'm about fifteen minutes. Western tim.
II looked pretty dubious for \ moment
and he didn't know exactly what 10 do
not having time to consult counsel
1t was q dark night In autumn, and
Mr.. Exbeadle felt that the morrow
would be Of very little interest 10 him.
Like an inspiration, however, com.
the recollection OF his fireworks la
rose and said:
"Gentleman Of the forest. You appar.
emily have the bulge on me-, and | ID.
nit you are largely In the mrj r,y, bu.
you do not know me. am mrlicius
man from Michigan, and can made Il
mighty interesting for your own good,
aud more In sorrow than in anger. II
you take out my vitals and feed then
10 the vultures, / will linger Hear ~
In the spirit, and annoy you pretty
plenty. lam aware that have planted
some of your leading men In the cold,
cold ground; Tut that isn'ts maraer 10
what will perform when get out Of
the flesh, where l won't he delayed
by the inclemency Of the weather.
III will now proceed To show you .
few little amateur efforts Of mine sss
medicine man from away back"
Mr.. ExbeadIe then let Off new style
of sea seapent from slight elevation.
II WAS the biggest thing In the line Of
pyrOtechnics that was ever turned lob-e
west OF the Missouri. 1t shot out into
the dark about nine feet like u carload
Of delirium tremens and squrmed
through the inky bosom Of might like
ar uneasy demon In his sleep. The
gathering warriors Of the tribe took one
Mortified look at the kissing emission,
and lit out. They left all their baggage
that didn't happen TO be tied TO them
and there hasn't been Shoshoae ln-
dian seen there since.
Mr.. Exbeadle picked out the best
ponies belonging to the tribe, loaded up
the rest Of the fireworks, ard went
home. He lived many years after,
and became one Of the most trusted 10.
dian Peace Commissioners known In
Western history.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
THE GENTLE cowBoY.
Prom q New Opera
FIRST COWBOY.

FIRST COWBOY.
I'm the no wler frum the pralries OF the West:
IL you vent To die with terror. look at me.
I'm chain lightning. II i amt, may 1 10
Die sed.
I'm the sno-ter OF thu boundleSs peraris,
Chorus os killer and hater;
He's tho great snnIhilator;
lies the terror Of the boundless
perRrie.
RECoSD COWBOY,
I'm the shorter from the upper trail;
I'm the TeSPsler In murder aud in gore:
can bu>t more Pullman co .cheS ON the rail
Than AIRY one who worked the Job heforA
Chorus-Hes y shorter and q snoozer;
He'- the eat trunk line Alb ser;
lie s the man who putt the sieepSr
on the rail.
THIRD CONVOY.
I'm the double-ia v ell ny ens from the East:
Tn the biazing bloody blizzard OF the
States;
In the celebrated slugger. I'm the beast;
Can snatch = man bald headed while he
waits.
Chorus TeS dnuhle iaved hyens;
Has the villain of the ne:
He can snatch a man bald headed
while he waits,
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
BERNHARDI's CHANGE OF COSTUME.

OF Sara Bernhardt Lucy II. Hooper
writes from Paris to the Philadelphia
Telegraph: "She has laid aside tho
flaming toilet of scarlet plush and gold
yellow satin wherewith she used to as
tonish her audience in the second act,
and now wears n dress of white satin,
worked with pearls and silver, which is
far more tasteful and artistic. But dis
pite profuse lace draperies, it is very
evident now that Nine. Sara will soon
have to quit the boards for a briefperiod,
end that before many months it may
he weeks-have passed, M. Maurice
will lie called upon to embrace u little
brother or sister,
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
A CoIoRED EVANGELIST.

Mis-. Amanda Smith, the celebrated
colored evangelist, is evangelizing
among the colored people Of Grand
Bsssa, Liberia. She writes that she
has given many Bible readings, and
that she finds among the women OF
Liberia great disposition to study the
Bible. She finds strong drink to be the
great curse of Liberia, and she is labor
ing diligently in the cause of temper
ance reform. She will probably make
her permanent home in Liberia. Mrs.
smith is a woman of limited education,
but of powerful magnetism and con-
siderable oratorical ability In her plain
way. She drew large audiences several
years ago, when at work in this co,in-
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
CONCERNING YOUNG LADIES.

In Cincinnati we learn that the
Young women are valuable because
they paint on china; in Louisville be-
cause they paint something else-per'
haps the lily; in Boston because they,
think they understand Emerson ana
know how to bake pork and beans in
molasses; IN Chicago because they have
great and responsible knowledge OF the
classics; in st. Louis because they wear
immense shoes; in New York because
they know how to dress; in Washing
ington because they can't speak Eng.
lish: in New Orleans because they have
black eyes and red lips, aud i'm other
places the girls are set forth on account
of various things.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
TIE CALF OF the CAFE.

IL you're anxious for 10 shIne
In high dudet Tic line,
As male OF some pretenSe,
nc non an must catch on all the ~gHyS"
And rate them high as sense.
Sou must surely don the '.skiRner,-
Lead a. atmospheric otnRerS;
Know "eo6n n ON q "haPny" quito,
And with Alblonic ways,
I'll New Workers with amaze,
Till teey mourn their wretched plight
Then every one will feel,
As mp the street oa steal,
A Wild, uncontrolSOss, snviOus INCLINATION
10 SepSSit beneath your seat
what Nature has intended 20 be fastener 20
the leg, but vRioh man often u>eN 10
entreat.
Let your conversation SAVIOR
or the "ton-" YOU daily favor,
by an acquaintance of Lord Gle. me seq;
Tslk Of Oxford & ,mbrldge "rShS.'
And the Prince Of Wales' "ciganS.
OF the tcIl, NJ of tue fair LaugEry
Gloves eolored terra q rita,
With q "dickey" Just too "uttah,
And a glass in eye tight screwed;
You INST y ear the pointed sandals
Canes with patent Spck king handIeH'
To De a iiTst-c.asS du-du-dude.
Then pedestrians will itch
As they gst In Your trousers hltch' .,,
To insert with "A vengeance, Ol iStc'uA
sWOop ON the back OF those ere pants,
Enough Vigorous force 70 whtrt you 70 tuS
source OF The Nile for your cousins Shu
sour RUntS.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
HOW TO KEEP A HUSBAND AT HOME.

The Washington correspondent of the
Boston Traveller tells the story Of VEN
cradle eX-member of Congress from
Pennsylvania, who has been married
twice, and has for his second wife a
lively young lady who is extremely
fond of social gayeties. Not long ago,
says the correspondent, she made an en-
gagcment TO accompany II young naval
officer 10 one of the fashionable balls,
and told her husband she was going,
but neglected to say she had secured an
cscoit. He appeared to be pleased, and
laid that he would accompany her.
This was more ehan she had bar gain ID
for, and she re sorted to various eXpedi-
ents to- get him to stay at home. The
more reasons she gave, the more he was
determined to 90. Things were getting
desperate, when Il bright idea struck
her. She took the old gcntlcman's
false teeth and hid them, and, when
the evening came, he was still without
those necessary adjunctS to mastication.
He wondered and ravcd, and ravrd
and wondered, but il was no use-he
couldn't lind them, and finally was
obliged to remain at home, while his
wife tripped gaily to her carriage and
spent q most delightful evening.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20

gay, "Hall right, Missy" before burst
of cheering rung out which drowned
every other sound. -,
Mis- Cissy, more frightened than
hurt, was delivered over into her half
distracted fathers care, while helped
to Lift Gentleman Joe from the escape.
He lay painting upon the ground,
burned and seOrched, his sporting coat
tattered and charred, while, strangely
enough, the prismatic hectic and horse
shoe pin had escaped the general de-
structi0n, so rs to present an absurd
oasis amid the desert around. He lay
without speaking or moving Hntil Cissy
.Newsome was led past him on her way
t0a cab. Then he made feeble gesture
with bis hand, which indicated that he
wished to speak with her, and she
stopped over him. No other ear but
mine caught that whisper.
"Don't fret, miss" he said, 'cause 1t
was the wrong boss came in. He's a
good, feiier-deal better than me--and
did a. much, but hadn't the luck.n
A vulgar little speech, but Cissy's
eyes got very moist rs she listened, and
I'm not sure that mine didn't, too.
The office was sadly reduced after
that. With Welstead and the Gentle.
man Oh the sick list, there We're only
four of us at the desk, and the reaction
from the excitement had left us any
thing but lively. can remember only
one remark ventured upon during that
first day. The dreary scratching of pens
had lasted uubrOken for over IN hour,
when little Sparkins looked up from bis
ledger.
81 suppose you would call him a
gentleman after all, ;" he said.
"a very much better one than you
will ever be-" grLwled Dullan, and we
relapsed into the scratching Of Peus.
| was present at the wedding OF
Charley Welstead and Cissy Newsome,
when. after a long delay, it was finally
celebrated. BY the original arrange.
ment was TO have figured As best man,
but my post of honor was handed over
TO q certain very ugly young man,
whose appearance suggested the idea
that he had spent the last few weeks
III a mustard police. Cnromantic as
il may seem, this youth rot only went
Though his duties with all the nom
chalance ia the world, but danced at
the subsequent festivities with the great-
est vigUr and grace. Ii is commonly
rumored that this activity of his, con.
corning horses and dogs, has go pre-
vailed upon the heart OF II susceptible
young lady that there is every probable
!ty OF our having q repetition Of the
marriage ceremony. Should 1t be So L
trust that | may nj least revert u my
original position Is best man.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
POLITICS AT vASSAR.

A country newspaper reporter visited
Na.sar College for the purpose Of getting
the views OF the young ladies on the
tariff question. To the very first one
WI ON he encountered he opened his
subject without any circumlocution, by
remarking: ~ suppose you girls go in
for protection?" I'VE did," she said,
with a low, sweet gurgle, "but If they're
going to increase the tax on chewing
gum we're all free traders"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
HvtooAshI0's TIE
% i

6ro0nyG f~g ..s
Tie prisoner vas hseod o. s.s'Ijcs
~ li1e witness In answer 70
on DE council for the psosecos,"." - 10
"I,o you desire the court s"arintsI
believe that you sss we'll s0qu
with bim:' y
"No; / can't say that ] Am ..,,dsrs.snd
3, "Weh, what avs We " unf nesd
then By the statement thss "
Of youfs~ 49,. An. witorS
aHc ko,rowsd s. Of me once A''
returned it, .v;dsnceS
friendship" .nu bsek "
would have wanted 70
more"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
Photos of,he v.aderbiIt Cestums.,

Ever since the Vanderbilt ball, the
twelve hundred guests have been
staLdiDg in line waiting tO be photo
graphed. Some Of the costumes Of tbs
girhs and many OF those OF handsome
young married women In social circles
were more remarkable for what they
concealed. The result a that many
OF the photographs are attractive In
more senses than one and would find
ready sale In the market. The dis
covery that a shrewd photographer has
recently sent two negatives of very
slightly costumed girls to Philadelphia
has caused the upmost condemnation
in toclal ciScles. Photographs are
struck of from these negatives In the
Quaker City and sold at very high
price to some OF the clubtnen there.
They were Mt once recognized by
friends ofthe young ladies and . SUE
cessful effort made TO stop their further
circulation. But meanwhile every.
body 10 frightened. Tho particularly
handsome women have more TO lear
than their hess favored sisters, for II d
taid that enormous prices have been
privately offered for photographs q
the lovellest society bellies.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-05-20
HELEN WiLMAN'S HEART.

wish TO upset a little error that
seems to have TePt into the minds OF q
few Of my male readers. This, namely,
that am hster of men. do not see
how any one could read my paper care.
Weekly Phoenix herald., 1883-05-10

The action of two of the Tomb
stone rangers in firing upon band
of Indians and thereby bazarding
the massacre Of a settlement, simply
to crafty a cowaroly pride for hrag-
adocio, cannot be too severely con-
demned. 1t was not done with a
hope that any good would follow to
anybody, but merely with sort of
insane desire 10 kill somebody. to
have something to brag about. The
majority of the rangers showed go d,
sound sense in following the careful
course they did, but those who now
brag that they killed somebody in a
tribe of Indians at peace simply
brag of their wanton bloodthirst-
mess; and If their cowardly act does
not precipitate the massacre of the
San Pedro settlers, the county will
De very fortunate indeed There is
a law to reach those fellows, and
they ought to be taken care of before
they commit further outrages.
Weekly Phoenix herald., 1883-05-10

WHITELAw REID, editor Of the
New Yrok Tribune, says. THE To-
cal paper is the best read paper in
the world. All the city papers can
not supply the place of the home
paper. No other contains the mar
riages and deaths, to say nothing of
divorces and births; no other relates
the accounts happening before the
doors of the townspeople; no other
gives the time for the next ball, pic
mic, or political meeting; no other
publishes the roll of honor of the
public school, no other discusses the
affairs of town and comfy, or gives
in detail the local news, which can
not be obtained from any other
source. Ever body reads it, and
that is why The little local paper is
the beet read paper in the world"