davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
THE REFORMED SCHOOL

A man. elegantly dressed. and wear ing plug hat and kid gloves, stopped a citizen in the stree; and said
 Will you please give me money
 "G,ve you money" indignantly re- piled the citizen. '' Why should give you moneyT'
 "Because am 5eggaf. used ,o go around with hand organ and sI, on the stree: corners, but close attention to busi- ness has raised me above the common herd. could dress in rags and tell you a p,tiful story of long suffering of being struck by lightning while at prayer, or of a boiler explosion that deprived me of ,ha, vital and highly n< asAry energy, SO useful Tn the support ofA bed-ridden wife, crippled small children and a scrotulous son, but am done with such artful wiles. have money in bank, and upon the whole am in excellent circum- stances, bu, am a beggar, an original beggar, striving to reform the profes- slon.'
 My friend" said the citizen, " am delighted 10 see you. and am pleased to note your improvement Here is a check for ten dollars. I: does me good 70 assist n the reform.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
THE FIRM MOTHER

Come here to me. sad a tlrm mother to her son. Didn't tell you ,hA, I'd whip you if you went down ,o~t, =
 "lessum," s,aRding on one foot. What made you go! Say
 Cause, ." standing on the other foot. "pidn', you know d whip you - 'iessuna. showing by hls manner that he didn't.
 I'm grea, mind ,o wear you out. If you go outside the yard again to-day I'll whip you"
 About ten minutes afc. wards she sees the boy playing Tn the street, and calls him. He comes reluctantly.
 Didn', tell yoa Id whip ,oa fl you wen, outside the yard
 "lessum.
 Why did you do i, =
 Cause
 lou good tor nothing li,tie rascal, I'm a great lnind ,s wear you out. fyoa go outside this yard again today I'll whip you, fl i,'s the las, ac, of my life nu you hear me =
 essum.
 After while she sees him p,aying IT the stree; again. Calls him and says
 Never mind. I'll tell your pa wher he comes
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
PLANTATION PHILOSOPHY.

Dc ~ise man an tie fool doan quarrel along so we'll
 De man ~ha, maIues oman case she's got more sense den he has, ls ncbe, allowed ter lose s,gh, o' dat faek
 De chile dat too soon shows signs O smartness ioan turn out ter be dc smart est man. De fust cotton dat opens ,s neber de bes'
 Eben 'mong de animals peatances makes difference, fur ef de black bird had bright feathers m his ~Ing wei think dat his song vas much sweetcr.
 De g,ggi,n gull gineraiiy turns out tel he tie woman what doan laugh much. an' : lemme tell yer. marriage an To, a ch,llun will take de ohuekle ou,en de mos O em
 De fos is no, only smart. bu, he IS de mos pcriSulaf Q all dc animals He s mighty playful, ba, he nebet K, so fur los in dc persui, o h,s pl-asure dat te neglecks his business an as soon as he stops playin he is SO mighty eunn,n' da, yer would think da, he neber paid any ',en,ion ter frolick. De coon has also got some fun in him. but II is sot, O dull an obef fed klne o' sport, fur he nebef plays all artcr he eats an auer he gets through. " he's dun ca, so much dA, he doan feel much like oapenn' 'roun
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

oughter dem ole man fur tellin whut he does know suthin' bout"
 |" Tut. tut, old man. you don, really believe that you ever saw a ghost. You ought to have more sense than to SOW such dangerous seeds Tn child's mind know the injury such stories did me when was boy. and 1t was difficult for me to shake of the influence even alter became man"
 Look aheah. parson, and the old man s,aigh,ened himself yer better go on an suade sinners ter come ter 'pen,enoe stead O ioolin' way yer tune wid me. rsc as maCn sot m my ways as verse; is in yourn Take dc ehle on e ,ei wants ter. bu, doan gin me none q. yer knowledge t.o on. says. an doan pIogic w,d me fust thing yer knows I ghos,li stop yer Tn de road an make yer shlvc; a might, cass shiNer, an hop ~id mighty lively hop. Think ise foolin' wld yer. but l amt. Nan, tune yer goes in grabe yard a, nigh, yer Il member whut de ole man hab said
 "Old man. you are foolish
 keep on. Suit de oie man m his own house Yer'll pay fur dis wid a mighty dear price. Good night. sah. Member ~hu; ;e!!s ye.," and s!,tlns down, he mu,tered to himself. "Dar ain no hope fur da, man. He's gwineter gi, skeered one Q desc nights ct has,et do It myself"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
THE souArrER's METHOD.

Will you please lend me your axe p said an immigrant. stopping a, the fence surrounding a log cabin, and addressing a citizen ot Arkansaw. My wagon broke down back here psece. and |, puts me ou, pretty badly. assure you. won't keep i, long Will you lend fl ,o me =
 would If il want tut one thing. the squa,ter. for such he was replied.
 What's that :"
 Amt go, naps."
 Nou don't pretend to say ,ha, you haven't %, an axe. do you z
 Noah. doan', pretend ter say tt hu, les; sa. t,
 How to yea get along without, an axe
 Don't gi, along ei,heu, one
 ," hIdn'; you sa, you didn't have one = "l eah
 Then you have onet
 Nook"
 My friend. hate to call a man lar. but m afraid this occasion demands it. You arc liar one way or the other, l don't knsw which
 "Ef thought ,ha, yer meant that I'd git over thar an Sia-. o.s. ;e: .>!! s.: dog would meet yer in the road an wouldn't Teoonnise yer. hu, don't bleve yer mean 1t. Yer see. as,er have a axe. but broke il, an sen, C then have been bou.n from one . the uelghbofs, but amt go, Il now
 How tar does the nei { hbot you speak ot live from here
 :" Bout slN mile
 Hes no: you, closes; neishbor IS he 7.
 "Nock
 Then why do you so so fai to bor- TOW an axe:"
 Wall, yer see. fl boIud |; from a close neighbor he could step ovet an g,, II any tune. ba, ~ hen botry t from a tel- Ter tha, lises so fur away, he wai,s good while before comes after k
 Why don, you buy an sse
 l,'s cheaper ter botry Il
 Hut you lose great deai ot tune soIns after i, =
 No more than the other fcief toes m comm alrier Il. Wall, good day. fur Eve got ter go out and bofry tub fur the ole oman, 70, loo high toned ter wash n the branch.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

adopt summary measures. don't want to acknowledge that em disappointed ,n you she's a grea, 'appsnE thsag, a direct descendant from long line os shoulder hitters, and she drew herself ap and said: Look ahere. hskley. you don't know who you are talkrn' to. be licvc the professor said that would sup ply your defolcnclex so will. think you want sound thfash,n. and hanged If don't supply the deficiency Isd she do i,s Well, let mc ind that phreno- logical rooster. Ah. Lord, and he hut- ned away. The old plan of marriage still remains the hest
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
BE CHEAPER.

A Scobchmzn who arrived in Little Rock. while the ladies were going around with the petitions with view to the ea- forcemeni of the temperance las, was approached by an enthusiastic woman who requested his signature. He did not unders,and and she explained ,ha, ar enforcement of the Law prohibited a saloon within three miles of church.
 dona much aboot il, but dinnz ken bu, ',would he cheaper 10 move the kirks than ,he whisky shops," and with ,his idea of public expenditure he refused to sign the petition.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
SouHED HIM

In an ArkAnsaw sunday school -And what did Philip do when the eunuxh sad here s much water and why may not be baptized 7
 No answef.
 @Whas did he do, ommy Burton r "Whas did who do -
 @why. Phillip
 + Ds to who F'
 The esnueh.f
 Don't know. bu, 1 rcckn he souseA him"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
BUSINESS MAKES pLEAsANr

This is miserable weather mar gro~led. leaning sgains, lamp pos,
 |" think i,'s beautiful replied an ac quain,ance The sun has Shobe ever, day for week. and the ar IS dry and pleasant.
 That's all very ~ell.' sad the gsowier, ba, you know i'm coal dealer"
 Why. no longer ago than a couple oi months heard you growing because Il was % cool
 "Yes, bu, you know, was in ,he ice business then"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
Borh RioHT AND BOTH WRONG

Did you mall the letter gave you last week s' asked Mn. Hlmpncy of her husband as they sAi down 10 the supper. table.
 "Ye.."
 Are you sutes
 "oh, yes"
 l requested mother to .epl, by re,aon mall and several mails have come iu since then Are you sure you haven't letter h your pooke, fof mey"
 T am pretty certain, that is, reasonably sure. l.iea t sh,nk u iikeiy that the car tler would come around and slip le,,e into my pocket when wasn't looking
 didnt mean that Of course no. body would come around and stp let. ter in your pocket wanted to he eet. tain. thats all s
 Well, tn assutc you" he sad, shoY. ing back h,s chan, I'll search myself Hello. what's this : ?" and he took ou, | letter. Huh, thl, ,s strange was sure ,ha, had mailed II, but l tell you whats fact. have a much business to attend to that can't remenbet any. thing"
 Hts wife made no reply. bu, looked down
 " Would have be. any amount, ot money tha, mailed that letter"
 Ills wife looked up Her eye. .hone with that moisture bc,okea,ng otherw,se 'nespsess,blc perplcs,ty
 We'll. now, here, don't cry about it Can't be helped, Will take II down thls very nigh, and sec ,hA, |, s mailed ''
 " IL proves that you never ,llnk of me There was time when you didn't forge, les. but my memory WAS better thaa II s now"
 II Il gets much wotse, you won, think of me at all"
 Wha, to you wan, ,o tan,al,.e me that way fott Hang Il. can't a man come home and Cal ~iihou, being lsc. turedl"
 fhat'' all you do come here for ,o eat
 hefe you go agaIn Don't intend to let me have any more peace. l suppose After awhile you'll aceuse me of some enme and ad as pfnseeu uting attorney. 1 don't see why you man,ed me
 don't either.
 There you go
 l ~as merely agreeing ~4ih you. sl
 Hut don, van, you to agree ~ih me. Think I'm a bear, doa'i yon
 No. not quite that bad"
 ca, no. nos q..;s There yet se.f and making flourish he upset A cup Of ho, coffee.
 There you go, she sad.
 That's n," he voeiferated, writh.nx and trying to relieve himself by l,itiag his paniaioons from h,s leg Make iua os man when he's scaided to death Smile al the agonles of sufferer"
 Way. hold on." ,h, isn't the letter after all. Let me zee and go,ng to the tnantl~p,eee she found the letter which sue had intended giving him.
 Then they both laughed Neither sf them had the advantage. There, nos, he said, aa she kissed h,m, "ges me aa- other pair of pants.
 " Yoaii forget to pu, them oa" 
 " No, unless you forge, tn bring them 9
 '' I've 10 more to say
 ~ As.ah~s
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

Allow me to oomplinen, you en the las; issue of your paper, said a gentle man to an editor I think l, IS the best number tha, you have ever isssed." '' Your kad words arc too late the ec- itcr replied, flor w.ih the las, issue sus- pended the publication of the Horn" "Yes, know" reloinec he friend, -and th1i's why though. the last issue was th- best"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
NOW THERE.

"Ho~ old arc you r little boy asked of little girl.
 "Oh, you nusn't ask me that" ]. "Why Y
 -'Canse a gentleman oughsen ask q Lady her age. I'm Eve goin' on six nov there.r
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08
JENNINGS.

4 uoman's character is like postage stamp. One blot and 1t is ruined.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

What is the great obstacle to modern though: P asks Mathew Arnold. Bile, MT. Arnold.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08


 MT. Arnold.
 My best thoughts are always the aardes, to write" said a literary man. Yes, replied an acquaintance, and they are always the hardest 10 read"
 Man came here to day." said a wo- man 10 her husband, and nearly fright eaed me to death. Oh, he did give me such turn" That was because he was crank. my dear" the husband re- piled.
 Coleridge, the poet, once joined a com pany of dragons under the name of Cumberback. This is a lasting proof of the old assertion that literary man cam no; win undying fame without pseu- donym.
 4 man who manured his garden with ashes advertised Phoenix Beans for sale "Why do you call them phenix ?' was asked .Because," he replied, they arose from the ashes" His friends are locking forward to his funeral.
 "A All, but England is Gods country, you know said British punster 10 an -Arkansaw hotel keeper. Why so. sir ~ " Because, you know, she has the house of the Lords" The hotel man reflected for momen, and repied: II had in- tended to charge you reasonably, bu, .ha, break puts double price on you"
 Milton thought that his Paradise Re- gained was better than his Paradise Los,," though the latter made him im- mortal while the former was regarded as unworthy of him. This was a curi- ous freak of human nature, for 1t is natural for man 10 think more of something Iost than of something gained. There IS the dealer in cotton futures, for instance. Ten thousand dollars los, keeps him awake al, night but ten thousand dollars gained does no; influence him to |" set Up the beer.
 Ivan Tourgenieff the grea, Russian novelist who died recently, said tha, once fool who believed in nothing good and who condemned everything was finally on this account selected by pub fisher as critic. It seems that this man s descendants have occupied similar places since the old fellows death, that is, if the old man actually died. The grea. critic is after all merely an accomplished fault finder. He produces nothing. He at temp,s to be an authority on tastes, but he ism, anything but growler. Le, him growl.
 Always write for the ewd,' said an editor 10 contributor. The man who writes for the few is never successful :" 1Wen,n the contributor replied, I am glad tha. yos have opened my eyes to this importan, fact h the past have not tesa greedy and only intended to write for few people. but since you so wisely advise me I'll take ny commcni- cation over to the other paper. Thank you kindly, sir. Didn't know before that an editor would so frankly acknowledge 10 the truth of his subscription list.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

My best thoughts are always the aardes, to write said literary man. Yes" replied an acquaintance, and they are always the hardest to read"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

Man came here to day." said wo- man 10 her husband, "and nearly fright eaed me to death. Oh, he did give me such a turn" That was because he was a crank. my dear" the husband re- piled.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

Coleridge, the poet, once joined a com
 pany of dragoons under the name of Cunberback. This is a lasting proof of the old assertion that literary man can no; win undying fame without q pseu-
The Arkansaw traveler., 1883-12-08

A man who manured his garden with ashes advertised Phenix Beans for sale. (. Why do you call them phenix ?" was asked. Because" he replied, they arose from the ashes' His friends are locking forward to his funeral.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06
THERE HE Is, MAMMA"
A Young Lady Recognizes Her Hero After
Seven Years.

The Boyd Opera-house was filling rapidly.
A trio of young men had just assembled to
the landing of the marble stairway and were
approaching the fight which leads to the
entrance, when a young lady, richly at
tired and accompanied by a matronly lady,
exclaimed: There he is, mammal The
three young gentlemen turned. AS they
did SO the elderly lady approached, and, ad-
dressing one of them, requested him to step
with her to the reception-room. Within the
room, the matronly lady said: "Mr. Nolan,
l am delighted to see you, and desire to can
eel debt of gratitude for
which l have long been IN arrears. My
daughter tells me it was you who saved
her life some years since in the
mountains of Colorado. She thought she
recognized you at the hotel to-day, and now
she is positive you are the man indeed. If
you will kindly accept this lettle souvenir Of
my appreciation of your exceeding heroism
you will place ME under even more heartfelt
gratitude"
Mr.. II. W. Nolan is not bashful man, be-
cause he is lawyer and a Chicagoan. Nor
is his modesty OF that Omahan nature which
would prevent him from wearing the beauti-
ful solitaire diamond which he feelngly &C
cepted on this occasion. If the gentleman
at all faltered, it was because of the languish-
ing effect the young lady's glances had upon
him, presumably because of the proprietary
right exercised over them by gentleman
present who was introduced as the young
ladys husband. The scene was a short one,
and upon it's conclusion all adjourned to
their respective seats in the auditorium.
Seven years ago MIR. Nolan was prospecting
in the mountains. He was climbing cir
cuitous road to a mining camp, when a run
away horse, to which chung frightened and
poweress lady rider, and which had run
away from party of equestriennes and their
escorts. came galloping rapidly toward him.
At a bend in the road both rider and animal
would have been dashed to destruction a
thousand feet below. At the risk of his life
he reached the bride of the horse as it was
flying past him, and, in short time, brought
the animal to his knees. Both horse and
rider were saved. The party and escorts soon
came up and bore their member home. Mr.
Nolan had not time or inclination to accom-
pany them and pose as rescuer, and conse
quently continued his journey. He soon
staked beyond the divide, and never heard
whom he had rescued. After years of alb
sence and separation. all the parties met here
as transients, as above related.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06

hensible blending OF stars and star dust
Definition is of little consequence in observ-
ing the shadowy nebule. Light is the ele-
meut needed, and nearly every ray that falls
upon the great objective is faithfully trans
mitted to the observing eye.
Imagination seeks in vain to iathom this
mystery of mysteries, this chaotic mass so
beautifully fashioned, this lovely blending
of tints Of gold and delicate green, this food
of light that started from distant space hun
dreds of years ago, this spiral form that re-
veals the quickening pulse of material life.
We feel, as we gaze upon the celestial scene,
that we are standing upon the threshold of
the golden portal that separates the earthly
from the heavenly We have a glimpse of
the glory to be revealed.
The Russian objective will soon be trans
ported to its destination in the Pulkowa OBJ
servatory founded by the Gar Nicholas, and
overlooking the city of the Cars from its
lofty position on the Pulkowa hills, nine
miles south of st. Petersburg.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06
Iowa Prohibition.

DAvENpoRT, Ia, April SIN the constitu-
tional amendment case before the Iowa SUI
preme Court, Mr.. Bills argued against the
validity of the prohibition amendment, and
Senator James f. Wilson began the closing
argument, asserting the validity and legality
of the law.
The Supreme Court reconvened at go p.
NJ. Senator Wilson continued his argument
in behalf of the validity of the prohibtory
amendment to the constitution. He said
the enrolled joint resolution of the Nineteeth
General Assembly in custody of the
Secretary of State is conclusive
evidence of its judgment upon the regulari-
ty OF the action OF the Eighteenth General
Assembly relative to the amendment in
volved. His closing point was that the judi
cial department has no jurisdiction over po-
litcal questions and cannot review the &c
ton of the General Assembly. The Senator
closed his argument at o'clock, and the
court announced that it would consider the
case. When decision may be looked for is
matter of doubt, probably at the next term
of court
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06
Household Hints.

A bit of economy is to save the peel OF or
anges; dry it and CRATE it for fiavoring mince
pies and orange cakes, and custard also If
it is dried perfectly, and is kept in a dry
closet, there is no danger of its becoming
musty.
The staining of bricks red is effected by
melting one ounce OF glue in gallon OF
water, then adding piece Of alum as large
as an egg, one-half pound of Venetian red,
and one pound OF Spanish brown; redness or
darkness rs increased by using more red or
brown. For coloring black, heat the bricks
and dip in fluid asphaltum or in q hot mix
ture OF linseed oil and asphalt
Durable and pretty covers for bureau
are made of drab aida canvas with the edge
finished with deep scallops crocheted of
macreme cord, or make the cover so large
that the edge will fall over the edge of the
bureau. Alter the canvas is fringed to the
depth of an inch, overcast the canvas so that
it will not ravel. A narrow border of worsted
above the fringe is pretty addition.
Silver in constant use should be washed
every day in pan of suds made of good
white soap and warm water, drying it with
old soft linen cloths. Twice a week (after
this washing) give it thorough Frightening
with finely powdered whiting mixed to a
thin paste with alcohol, rubbing longer and
harder where there are stains Then wipe
this off and polish with clean, soft old linen
The plaid fiannels which are offered at sur
prisingly low prices at this season of the
year make desirable covers for comforters
They are so firm that they do not need to be
tackled very closely, and can be easily ripped
apart and washed when it is necessary AL
though one wonld prefer to be engaged in
sewing on muslin and summer garments, it
is nevertheless true that it is a good time
now to consider the needs of another winter
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06
A New cantata by Gounod.

New York, April 5.-The Critic of April
It'll will say: Charles Gounod has sent the
French Choral Society Lesperance, of New
York, new cantata entitled La Statue de
la Liberte' composed for male voices accom-
panied by military band. 1t is said to be
large in style and very effective, and of the
same class as the famous soldiers march in
Faust Several French choral societies are
now rehearsng the cantata under the di-
rectorship of their leader, Prof Vicarino,
who intends to arrange concert exclusively
by French artists for the benefit of the ped
estal fund for the Bartholdi statue of lib
erty. The programme will be made up OF
French compositions unknown to American
audiences ~
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06
Verona BALDWIN Acnnitted.

SAN FRANcIsco, April Sin the case of
Verona Baldwin, on trial for shooting
Lucky" Baldwin, the jury retired at noon.
and after brief delay asked some further
instructions regarding the question OF in
sanity. They again retired, and at
2 o'clock returned verdict OF
not guilty on the ground of insanity.
The verdict was received with applause by
the crowded audience. The Judge ordered
the court cleared. A number of Miss Bald
wins friends and many strangers personally
congratulated her, and the ladies present got
up quite an ELUSIVE scene over her. She re-
ceived her acquittal smilingly and much as a
matter of course.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-04-06

CINCINNATI, April Or. c. Lowell, doing
business as a coal merchant, under the firm
name of the Pioneer Coal Company, made
an unexpected assignment to-day, in
the Kenton County Court. The as
signees are Charles H. Stephens. of Gin
cinnati; Val p. Collins, of Covington
and J. J. Lowell, of Kanawha county, West
Virginia. The liabilities are about sos, 600
due to about thirty creditors, half of whom
have left claims. The. largest creditors are
in Covingthn, among whom are the Northern
City National Bank, $1,000 Covington
Farmers and Traders National Bank S16,-
600; Covington First National, $4,000; Gov