davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Pen Pictures Of Young Washington Swells,

Pen Pictures Of Young Washington Swells.
The Presidents son, Mr.. Allan Ar
thur, was one Of the cavaliers Of the
evening. says Washington correspond
ent. describing recent reception there,
and the tall young man. with his serious
brown eyes, was quite a target for
pretty chances when he started down
the room with favor in his hand to
dispose OF. Attorney General Brew
ster's step-son was another dancing
prize for these seventy young girls: and
young Walker Blaine. who had his bap-
tism of diplomacy with the Prescott
mission in Chill and Peru, was quite .
lion in the assembly. All these noble
Americans paled before the Count Fitz
James, the last of the Stuarts, who
spends his winter in the American capi-
tai. with his friend, M. de Bildt, of the
Swedish legation. The count does not
dance, but he plays sad havoc for all
that. and his strongly accented English
and his ripping French are music to
the ears of all the aspiring bellies. The
noble Fitz James is strikingly hand
some, and has a superb way Of bowling
when presented to any one, that takes .
damsers breath away, and keeps her
gasping for ten minutes thereafter.
When reckless lancer bursts upon the
courtly Stewart, and whirls the young
lady away in the mazes Of the german,
the count raises his shoulders and sud-
denly hobs his head forward and down,
much as his ancestor, Charles L, may
have dropped his head after tho fatal
stroke at Whitehall, and gracefully
backs off.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Had Good Raa..ne

A sketch in horse-car: He was q
gentleman who wore overalls and car
ried a tin dinner-pail. His clothes were
unready made and his boots were not
symmetrical. He said the long journey
of five miles each way, to and from his
work was trying. why don't you live
in the city?'' Because, SORT lin a
rich Milesian brogue-''if lived in the
city, should have to live in tenement
house. You don't know tho kind of
people who live there. They're bad
lot all through. ginerally. Sights go on
no woman or child should see. I want
to save my wife and children from see-
ing corruption, so I moved out here.
Good night, sorr.' And he left the car
at the little cottage, whose inmates were
sheltered from corruption" and was
greeted with a chorus Of Here's faith
err that showed the gentleman with
the dinner-pail had not lavished care
without receiving return in love-
Boston Transcript.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Relief Wanted.

The Chairman of the Committee on
the Sick of Bro. Gardeners Lime Kiln
Club reported that Arctic Shotwell, a
local member living on Bcaubien street,
was in bed and under the doctors cars
and had applied for aid from the relief
fund.
ibid de committee diskiver de natur'
Of his complaint?' asked the President.
''Not exactly, sab. DE mind Of de
pashent seemed to gHander de day we
called, an as nigh as we could make
out he had fallen off a house while saw
in wood fur poo wilder wild six
chill'en.''
His mind will wander wus dan dat
afore he gifts any money outer dis
LODGE replied the President. ..De
cause of his sickness am to be foun' in
de fack dat one night las week he bet
fifty cents dat he could put a teacup in
ter his mouf. He won de bet, but when
it cum to takin' de cup out it took a
doctor de best part of two hours, an
den he didn't purtend dat he got all de
small pieces. If dar am any odder
gem'lan in dis club who finks he kin
arm his libin' by stretchin' his mouf on
small wagers he may take notis right
now dat de club will expect him to
furnish his own .chicken-soup an pay
his own doctor bills
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
He Wa tho Fellow.

00 " ~ ta40 3 ollOWs
Sol Miller is responsible for tho fol-
lowing:
A good thing is related as having oo-
CURED in . barbershop in certain town
in this county recently. on the occasion
Of too-too wedding.
''Well." said the barber to the usual
crowd of loungers about such place. Il
guess the monkey show will come of
this evening"
What kind Of =. show Ia thatp'' In
quired stranger in the chair.
"Oh. there's to be wedding in town. :"
replied the barber.
''Who il to be marriedp"
''Well, some travelling man out west u
going to marry old Mrs. Hornswoggle's
daughter. They would have been mar.
ried > year ago. II it had not been for
the old woman.
what was wrong with herr"
lob, she's . regular old tom-cat with
goggles on. She's too pious to blow her
nose, and the fellow il IN outand.out
Intidel'' ~
.'And how have they fixed it, that the
marriage is to take place now7''
''Well, he's worth about forty thousr
and dollars. and she hadn't enough re-
ligiou to buck against that. But its
lucky for him that be lives good way
from the old woman" -,
The stranger was shaved, and - the
barber was brushing his coat. he inquir-
ed: =.
DO you live In this neighborhoodp
NC" replied the stranger; ''Tm from
the west. I'm the fellow that IL to be
married this EVENING" Grip.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
The Great Reporter.

Mr.. Osgood the Boston publisher.
gave me this story recently: He said
when Mr.. Dickens wanted TO come to
read in America few years before bis
death, he was very sensitive about the
reception he would have after his lam
pooning the country in 1912. So he sent
his agent, DR.. Dolby, ahead, who called
on Fields & Osgood and asked them to
take the agent to tho newspaper Offices
in Boston and New York, Among 9th
or places he was carried to the Office of
James G. Bennett. the founder. Of the
Herald. The old man listened to the,
questions DR.. Dolby put, When be was
asked II DickenJ' comments on America
long ago would injure bis reception,
Bennett said: mo the American people
are great enough to overlook the errors
or impudence Of = young man who
meant to sell his wares about us 10 Eng
land" After Dolby got through. how
ever. old Bennett remarked: "Who Is
this Dickens, anyway Heis nothing
but reporter. have got four or five
men in my Office who are better report
ers than Dickens" The old man was
perfectly serious about IL, too.
After Mr.. Fields told the story q
gentleman present said: do you re-
member thatat the Dickens dinner Geo.
w. Curtis, who made the best speech
there, described Dickens as reporter
all the way through, and said that the
reporters faculty IN all great literary
men was the foundation Of their power?
Even in Hawthorne. who became . re-
porter in garrets and back yards, among
the bugs and cobwebs and rays Of light.
instead Of ont among the crowd"
WELL" said Mr.. Osgood, Fl could
not help feeling that the strong points
Of Dickens were. % reporter. closely
observing the dialect and behavior Of
men. To me the sPickwick Papers re-
main the most delightful things Dickens
ever did and they are reporting through
out. Gath.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
An American Joke in Paris.


The feast was set, the guests were
met. when a young man entered in.
''Sir," said he to the master Of the
house, Il have come to you upon \ very
important mission. We're 1t otherwise,
should not have ventured to call upon
you upon this suspicious day, when. IS
! perceive, you are about to celebrate
the betrothal of your fair daughter. ~
Still, as it may save you $l0;0O0-but IL
you are engaged will retire"
''By no means, my dear sir, by no
means" said the father of the bride ex-
pectant, warmly; I'VE are just about sit
ting down to dinner. but you join 10.
and. after dinner, we can discuss mat
ters."
The young man allowed himself to be
induced to join the jovial company,
where he eats for two, and drinks for
three.
At the conclusion of the feast the
father escorts him to private apart
ment and begs him to reveal bis busi-
ness.
II think. SIR" he says to the stranger
offering him a cigar Of prime quality,
''that you observed that you could show
me how to save $4,000"
PRECISELY" says the stranger. light
ing the cigar. Nov, you intend mar.
rying your daughter to that amiable but
somewhat weakminded youth down
stairs and giving her marriage portion
of $4,000. Give her to me, sir, and I'll
take her with half the money. That'u
leave you SIC, OOO."
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Anthracite Gal.

Anthracite ccal was discovered In
Pennsylvania soon after the settlement
Of the Wyoming valley, but ito first
practical use, says q correspondent Of
the Pittsburg Commercial, was by Obe-
diah Crosse in his blacksmith's shop In
the year 1868. In 1891 Philip Ginter
discovered anthr acite coal on the Lehigh.
In 1902 Robert Morris, of Philadelphia,
formed company and purchased six
thousand acres of the property on which
Ginter discovered the coal. The coal
company was called the Lehiyh Coal
mine. This company opened the mine
and found the vein to be fifty feet thick
and Of the very best quality Of COAL
The company made every effort to ~
cure demand for the coal. but without
success. and, having become thoroughly
disgusted with their. speculation. leased
the six thousand acres of this mammoth
coal-tield to Messrs. White & Hazard, Of
Philadelphia, for twenty years. at An
annual rental of one ear Of corn. Messrs.
White 4 Hazard tried to use the coal In
the blast-furnaces in 1855. but failed;
the furnace chilled. In 1882 Nelson
conceived the idea of the hot blast for
saving fuel, and in 1883 David Thomas
adopted the idea of the hot blast and an
thracite together. White & Hazard had.
previous to this, formed company and
bought the property. In 1889 David
Thomas made the use of anthracite for
making pig-metal SUCCESS, by which
the twenty ears of corn were transferred
into $50, 100000. And this 10 the early
80 a. r
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
The Problem.

Pretty we'll up toward skylight and garrett
Witn none but herself TO use or to share II,
The night WAS far spent yet her work was
rather tough Job remained to be done. .
Ino a! she felt that her strength was well
Some books. fun Of figures. lay open before
A muddle that bothered her poor little head
OF data to s1ft out the prompt from the lazy.
But at ,em she went, though she whfmpered
Then NJ added sitHsI = subtracted, divided and
Mixed means and extremes, got square root
and-crfed;
Took fractional ratios, reduced 'em and
mOaned;
Then adding again, she divided and scored,
Cube rooted. and worked up the tens and tho
Till. fre,ted-dead reckoned-her fate she de.
And seemed like to die Of the figures and
She summed up the absent, and worked up the
She reckoned the clean and the dirty;
She averaged Jimmy and Sally and Kate,
And brought out percentage at thirty;
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS she made five per cent,
The "perfeci in reading but two;
Then t. sh get e The genf her brat bent
For it looked like IL of 3-s of 10
Divided by plus II;
ana &c OOtuereO 0er'nedO GnO SeXeQ uer spleen,
And dfmmed her blue eyes with water,
So giving II up she eprang for relief
To very din .rent quarter.
Sending backward her thoughts and fond be-
lief IS
Toward those she dreamed had once sought
her,
In hopes OF devising some possible plan
Of working out, some way, an."aveEage"
f{=sE man, gess - rg.ra
And changing the school for q bridal,
And 80 Of achieving deliverance
From tasks she deemed useless and idle.
Il "Ah! yes; what's the chance, the blessed
CHANGER
But the ''answer" gave chance but .for2
Among the schOOlma' ans o plus,4,e z.yss
While al that remained must still average"
@,t' do,
And, like Poe's Raven, sigh .Nevermore!"
Dear me-! what's 1t for3'' she exclaimed IL 4
pet;
5.'Why not leave US poor bodies some sway?
Let Us use some small judgment-not keep
us in fret,
Alb. poor little noodle! the powers thatreisn
Are 30 wise, 20 precise and 90 keen, 45e
That they know the sole way perfection" to
gain ~ ssE t.ts3.s*'t%' 's'1..ss&'t
10 to make each schoolma' am machine
e r#5s NJ, :as-[ BOSTON Transcript.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Just His WaY.

/
II see, . she observed q she looked
up from her paper, that another wo-
man who was perfectly sane all the
time has just been released from luna
tic asylum after a detention Of three
years. .
Eyes. = briefly replied the husband
= ''She was incarcerated BY her hus-
band.'' :, 5,
Yea
''Who wanted her out Of the wsv that
he might marry another woman"
yes
lin case you desired to dispose Of me
you would probably have me shut up il
lunatic asylum
mo. MA am; should poison you.
That's the cheaper and better way. Az
man Of business. and as an advocate
of financial economy, have thought
this matter over time and again, and /
should certainly prefer to spend fifteen
cents for arsenic to paying out $40 tc
$l5 per week for goodness knows how
long" a
She looked at him long time with !
whole iceberg In each eye, and then
turned to her paper with the remark:
Just like your stingy ways; you
never want me to have anything like
other folks"
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Hollsrin, for Ral;sf.

We never know, says the Buffalo Ez-
press. what is passing through tho
minds Of the sad-faced, immobile men
who open our doors or stand behind
our chairs at dinner. Their countenau.
ces never reveal their impressions OF the
queer things they are often called upon
10 witness. Apropos Of this. one Of tho
correspondents tells funny story of an
incident which occurred At Mra. George
Ticknors last summer at Newport. IN
her hall always stood . most impressive
and impressive liveried footman. bear.
ing silver salver on which to receive
cards, and showing usually no moro
emotion than the wooden hat rack.
But one afternoon, when Mrs. Ticknor
was out and the house was very quiet,
an amanuensis copying notes in an up
stairs room, was startled by . series Of
bowls and yells from below. She kept
1t her work. thinking that II the ser.
wants In the kitchen were killing each
other It was no business of hers. Don
up came . maid to ask If she was fright
encd. She said she was not ..Oh, 70
ain't! Well, thought I'd tell 70.
mum, that it's only the footman. When
the folks is out an the house quiet b
can'tstand it, an he has to boiler. It's
kind o. relievin' to him"
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Pioneer Women in Journalism.

The first daily newspaper printed Ia
the world was established and edited
by w0man-E Elizabeth Mallet, in Lon
don, 17O2-almost two hundred years
ago. In her sa'n.atory she said she had
established newspaper :. to spare the
public half the impcrtinences which the
ordinary papers contain Womanlike,
her paper was reforlnatory.
The first newspaper published in Amer
lea Of which we have any record was in
Massachusetts. It was called The Mas
sathusetts Gazette and Ne,rs Letter.
After the death of the editor the widow
edited it in the most spirited manner
for two or three years. It was the only
paper that did not suspend publication
when Boston was Lesieged by the British.
The widow name was Margaret Craper.
In 1882 Rhode Island issued its first
newspaper. 1t was owned and edited
by Anna Franklin. She and her two
daughters did the printing. and their
servants worked the printing press.
History tells US that for her quickness
and correctness she was appointed prin-
ter to the colony. supplying pamphlets.
ETC., to the colonial officers. She also
printed an edition of the Colonial
Laws of $40 pages.
In 1776 Sarah Goddard printed pa
per in Newport. r. l., ably conducting
it. afterward associating with her john
Carter. The firm was announced a.
Sarah Goddard & Co., taking the part
nership precedence as was proper and
right.
In l772 Clementine Reid published =
paper in Virginia favoring the colonial
cause. and greatly offending the royal
lists; and two years after another paper
was started in the interests of the crown
by Mrs. II. Boyle, borrowing the name
of Mrs Reid's paper, which was The
Virginia Gazette, but which was short
lived. Both Of the papers were pub
lished in the town of Williamsburg.
The colonial paper was the first news
paper in which the Declaration Of indie
pendence was printed.
In 1878 Elizabeth Timothy published
and edited paper in Charleston. S. C.
After the Revolution, Annie Timothy
became its editor, and was appointed
State printer, which position she held
seventeen years. Mary Crouch pub
liahed q paper in Charleston about the
same time, in special opposition to the
stamp act. She afterward removed her
paper to Salem, Mass, and continued
its publication there for years after.
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
He Got Even.

A Chicago speculator whose little cor.
ners and other games had been several
times exploded BY = certain newspaper,
didn't 20 rushing around with . club to
mash somebody. He simply said to his
secretary. when he could stand it no
longer:
James. ascertain who writes those
attacks on me in the Roarer.'
ut is John Smith. SIR
Then give him sly hint that pork
is to 60 up next week.
''Yes, sir.'
The hint was conveyed to John Smith,
and be scraprd bis pockets, mortgaged
his house and drained his friends for
cash to put into pork.
Then pork tumbled. So did John
Smith. Then the stock reporter Of the
Budget published the fact that the stock
reporter Of the Roarer had bought on .
falling market and been scooped. Hence
his animus. Hence the animus of all
future reports. Hence the handicapped
Roarcr. Hence the grand bounce for
John Smith. See?
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
WHOLE NUMBE $50.
CONCERNING Ned atokes

Geo. W. Peck. Of Peck's Sun, while
on vacation in New York wrote thus
to his paper:
I am stopping at the Hoffman House,
9 most magnificent place, on Madison
Square, kept by Ned Stokes, who u
about as well known as any American.
The bar-room Of the house is, as readers
OF newspapers know. the finest In the
world. al mahogany. silver, and gold,
and contains tho finest oil painting I
ever saw. It represents three or four
naked nymphs, trying to pull . thing
that is half man and half cow, into the
water where they have been bathing.
The legend IS told me by the bartender
is. that the girls caught the ..What-is-
It. peeking at them as they were In
swimming. and concluded to duck him
IN the water. The painting is superb
and one can look at it all night, and not
be tired. The faces and forms OF the
females are so natural, that you look 1t
them and imagine you have seen them
before. but. You can't place them. II
they would put on some clothes YOU
would feel as though you would like an
introduction to them; but they have not
got any clothes, SO you don't want to
make their acquaintance. Mr.. Stokes
is about the house all the time, attend
ing to business, and is picture Of =
man that one would look at MANY times.
He has as many friends as any man in
New York, and though his experience
OF the last ten years has made his hair
gray, his heart is warm, and his pure
always open to the needy. know bis
heart is all right because he has invited
me to take a ride. with him up Harlem
Lane. but it will be my luck to have the
snow disappear before his fast team 10
hitched up. ! guess all the Wisconsin
people stop at the Hoffman House, a.
they are thicker than bees around here.
Everybody connected with the house
speaks of Alexander Mitchell, who often
stops here. and they ask after his health
as anxiously as though he was q good
friend to them, as he is to everybody.
The porter, 3 gentleman of Irish par.
entage, says, ..Alister Mitchell II the
toinest man that ever came 70 this
house," and when told him that nv
Office was on the same street with the
Office Of Mr.. Mitchell, there was q bond
of friendship between the porter and mo
that will be cemerted with, q dollar
when go away. That 10. I think I can
borrow . dollar Of that porter, on 90
count Of my Office. being on the same
street with that Of Mr.. Mitchell. though
appearances arc often deceiying.,
Well, you cant expect much from
me this week. because have not got
acclimated yet but next week l shall
be boiling over, probably. Till then
ear de Ueivc. Il got that French OF
bill Of fare. 90 don't know whether
it - very good or not.)
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24

After q St. Louis attorney had thanked
a jury for a verdict in favor Of his client
the presiding Judge called him to the
front and said to him: Il hope shall
not see another such exhibition in this
court, SIR The surprised lawyer re-
monstrated mildly. arguing, at the
pleasure of the court, that politeness
should find place anywhere. You arc
mistaken. sir. continued his Honor.
'.Your right to return thanks to jury
for rendering a verdict acquitting your
client implies corresponding right to
damn the jury If they convict the de-
PENDANT, which is patiently improper.
In future you will refrain from these q.
hibitions.''
New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1883-01-24
Gathering and Planting Bones.

ScSoAAoAAA6 SSAA 4 AO0oAAS9 ASVAO0e
William Cliff gives valuable informa-
ton on the u.s.. of bones, in the Ameri-
can Agriculturist for January:
The value of bones as fertilizer, in
their various forms. is well known.
The cost. some $50 to $40 q ton, is the
chief objection to their use by the aver
age farmer. 1t is not so generally un-
derstood that whole bones, as they are
gathered from the refuse of families in
the streets and yards of our villages.
are quite as available, and within reach
of many thrifty farmers who have busi-
ness every week in the neighborinx
towns. They are especially valuable
for planting around fruit trees and
vines, They can be put in trenches
within reach of the roots of trees al
ready planted. with great advantage to
the wood and fruit of the trees. They
are rich in ammonia, as we'll as phos-
phoric acid. and will show their effects
in the increased yield of fruit for twenty
years or more. They have no standard
value. and can generally be purchased
of the boys, who are glad to get IS or
40 cents q barrel for them. Sometimes
a bonanza can be struck at the slaughter
house of the village butcher, as the re-
fuse of slaughtered animals, mixed with
absorbents, makes powerful fertilizer.
This is much more valuable manure
than that of the barn-yard.- The buried
bones gradually soften under the inhu-
ences Of the soil, of heat and frost, until
the fine plant rootlets penetrate the sub
stance of the bone, and absorb the nour-
ishment. If you take up grape vine
that has been planted over bed Of
bones, after few years, you will find
the bones firmly grasped by the roots.
and in a decaying condition. From one
to three bushels may safely be planted
under every pear and apple tree and
grape vine.