The semi-weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1882-1886, 1883-05-09
DAMON AND PYrHIAs
The Beautiful Story as Retold bv
Bill Nye.

Damon and Pythias were named
after . popular secret organization be-
cause they were solid on each other.
They thought more of one another
than anybody. They borrowed
chewing tobacco and were always
scciable and pleasant. They slept
together, and untiedly "stood off,
the landlady from month to month
in the most cheerful and harmonious
manner. II Pythias snored in the
night like the blast of a fog horn,
Damon did not get mad and kick
him In the stomach as some would,
HI gently but firmly took him by the
nose and lifted him up and down to
the merry rylhm of "The Babies
on Our Block" They loved one
another in season and out of season.
Their affection was like the soft
bloom on the nose of a Wyom-
ing legislator. It never grew pale or
wllte0. 1t was always there. If
Damon was at the bat, Pythiss was
on deck. If Damon went to- church
fair and invited starvation, Pythlas
would go to and vote OH the hand
soonest baby till the First National
Bank of Syracuse would refuse to
honor his checks. But one day Da-
mon got too much bulge, and told
the venerable and colossal old bum
mer of Syracuse what he thought OF
him. The .Dionysius told the chief
engineer of the sausage grinder to
turn on the steam and prepare for
business. But Damon thought of
Pythias, and how Pythias hadn't so
much to live for as he had, and made
a compromise by offering to put
Pythias In soak while the only genu-
inc Damon went to see his girl, who
lived at Albany. Three days were
given him to get around and redeem
Pythias, and if he failed his friend
would 60 to protest.
We will new suppose three days
have elapsed since the preceding
chapter. A large party of enthusiasts
tic citizens Of Syracuse are gathered
around the grand stand, and Ptthias
is on the platform, eheerfully taking
of his coat. Near by stands a man
with a broad-axe. The Syracuse Sill
yer Cornet Band has just played "It's
Funny When You Feel That Way"
and the Chaplain has made a long
prayer, Pythias sliding a trade dollar
into his hand aud whispering to him
to give him his moneys worth. The
of Independence has
been read, and the man on his left is
running his thumb playfully overthe.
edge of the meat-axe. Pythias takes
off his collar and tie, swearing softly
to himself at his miserable lack. Ii
is now the proper time to threw in
the solitary horseman. The herizon-
tai bars of golden light from the set
ting sum gleam and glitter from the
dome Of the Court House and bathe
the green plains of Syracuse with
mellow splendor, the billowy piles
Of f1eecy bronze in the eastern sky
look soft and yielding, like
Sala Bernhardt. The lew
ing herd winds slowly DER the lea.
md all nature seems possessed with
hush and stiffness of the sur
rounding and engulfing horror. The
horsenlan is seen coming
along the Albany and Syracuse toll
road. He jabs the Mexican spurs
into the foamy TANKS OF his noble
plug, and the lash of his
luirt as it moves through the air
sings a merry song. Damon has
been delayed by road agents and
and he is a little behind
lime. Besides, he fooled a little too
.ong, and dallied in Albany with his
air gazslle. But he is making up
line now, and he sails into the Jail
yard just in time to take his part.
He and Pythias fall into each others
rms, borrow a chew Of fine cut from
ZACH other and weep to slow music.
comes before the curtain,
and says the exercises will be
He orders the band to
,lay something soothing, gives Da-
non the appointment Of SuPerinten-
lent of Public instruction and
the Syracuse Postotfice, and
is lovely. Orchestra
lays something touchful, "Comes
1n~r II ANnn "