Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1883-08-04
MATCHMAKING.


American mothers have acquired come
reputation for skill and energy in con-
nubial management on behalf of their
daughters. a Partisan newspaper some
time ago recorded an exceedingly clever bit
of matchmaking, executed by an Ameri-
can lady of this order In brilliant STYLE.
Her eldest daughter had sailed from New
York with some friends for tour of
Europe, and after g doing the continent,
had returned 20 the French capital for sev-
eral months of rest and plsasuFing. At.
tractive and clever, she had many suffers,
some more, some less desirable. She could
not marry them all, so she adroitly re-
duced the number to two-the best Of the
lot, of course. Then she wrote home 20
her mamma, explaining the exact situation
of affairs, adding that they were both SO
handsome, agreeable well-conrecsed, and
rich, that she could not decide between
them, and closed with the question,
"Whas shall do?' Ten days later she
received q cablegram from mamma: al
sail tomorrow hold both till | come.
The next transatlantic steamer brought
MrH. Blank with her second daughter, Just
turned is, and fresh from school. On her
arrival the old lady at once took the helm
of affairs, and steered so deity through
the dangerous waters that in few weeks
she had reached port with eli colors flying.
To drop metaphor, she attended the we'd
ding of her TWO daughters at the Ameri-
can chapel on the same morning. After
due examination she had decided that
neither of the nice fellows should go out
of the family.
Here is an illustration Of much less
skillful attempt at matchmaking, with a
very different denouement. A certain
member of Parliament, who owned extern.
sive estates, was spending a few days at
the residence of a noble family. There
were several interesting and accomplished
young ladies In the family, to whom the
honorable member showed every attention.
Just as he was about to take leave, the
nobleman's wife proceeded TO consult him
upon a matter which, she declared, was
causing her no little distress. alt is re-
ported" said the Countess, that you are
to marry my daughter Lucy, and what shall
we do? What shall we say about it 2"
sob p replied the considerable NJ. P, with
much adroitness, "just say she refused
me-"
We have said that men do not, as rule,
figure conspicuously as match-makers nor
do they. Bat the judgment and policy
exhibited in this connection by knowing
old gentleman of our acquaintance could
hardly be surpassed by the most accom-
plished tactician of either sex. Brown,
said a neighbor to him one day, 81 don't
zee how it is that your girls all marry off
as soon as they get old enough, while none
of mine can marry"
"Oh that's simple enough, . he replied.
{" l marry my girls off on the buckwheat-
straw principle"
"But what principle is that? Never
heard of it before"
''Well, 1 used to raise good deal of
buckwheat, and it puzzled me TO know
how TO get rid of the straw. Nothing
would eat it, and it was a great bother to
me. At last 1 thought of a plan. l
stacked my buckwheat straw nicely, and
built high rail fence around it. Ny cat.
tie, of course, concluded that il must be
something good, and at once tore down the
fence and began to eat the straw. drove
them away, and put up the fence few
times but the more l hunted them off
the more anxious they became TO eat the
straw; and eat it they did, every bit of it,
As said, marry my girls on the same
principle. When young man that don't
like begins to call on my girls l enct urage
him in every way l can. tell him to
come often and stay as late as he pleases;
and 1 take pains to hint to the girls that
/ think they'd better set their caps for
him. 1t works first rate. He don't make
many calls, for the girls treat him as coolly
as they can. But when a young fellow
that I like comes around, a man that /
think would suit me for law, l
don't let him make many calls before l
give him to understand that he isn't
wanted about my house. 1 tell the girls,
too, that they shall not have anything to
do with him, and give them orders never
to speak to him again. The plan always
works exactly as I wish. The young folks
begin to pity and sympathize with each
other; and the next thing know is that
they are engaged to be married. When 1
see that they ara determined to marry, I
of course give in, and pretend to make the
best of it. That's the way l manage it.
An old lady who had several unmar-
ried daughters fed them largely on a fish
diet, because, as she ingeniously observed,
fish is rich in phosphorus, and phosphorus
is the essential thing in making matches.
If the phosphoric diet caused the young
ladies to shine in society, they in all
probability did not adopt it in vain for,
just as fish are easily attracted in the
night by any bright light thrown upon
the water, SO young men are invariably
found to flock after any girl who "shines,"
even though her complishments may be
of very shallow, superficial or phos-
phorescent character. No experienced
match making mamma requires to be
taught the value of display as an almost
certain means of attraction. That is the
secret of the ball suppers and iced cham
payne, the heavy dressmskers' bills, and
the thousand and one other items CT ex.
travagance that have to be met IN order
that the young ladies may make re
spectacle" appearance, and may finish
with successful match. And that is
why so many of these match making ven
lures have so often resulted in the most
deplerable sequels. Display is met with
display-the one frequently as hollow and
false as the other. The distinguished for
eigner or the fascinating young nobleman
is discovered, when it is too late, to be
nothing more nor less than an unprinci-
pied adventurer; aad the merchant who
was supposed to be little if anything short
of millionaire is found, also when it is
too late, to be on the verge of bank
ruptcy. Very often in such matches both
parties are sold, and then the universal
verdict is, "Serves them right. - Cham
bers' journal.