The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-26
THE Rad nOY.
He Drives the Wi liter tn u Funeral
and H eahs uptae PrOce sion.

well, Julius Caesars great bald
headed ghost, what's the matter with
your" said the grocery man to the bad
boy, as he cane into the grocery Oh
crutches, with one arm in q sling, ont
eye blackcned, and strip Of court plas
ter across the side Of his face. "Whert
was the explosion, or have you been in .
fight! Or has your pa been giving yor
what you deserve, with a club.
''Oh, it wasn't no fuss" said the boy
"It was in the way of business Yo,
see the livery man what was workin
for promoted me. He let me drive
horse to haul sawdust for bedding first
and when he found was real careful b.
let me drive an express wagon to hau
trunks. Day before yesterday, thinl
it was--tyes, was in bed all day yester
day)-day before yesterday there was
funeral, and our stable furnished tbs
outfit. 1t was only common eleven
dollar funeral, sothey let me 90 to driv
the horse for the minister-you know
the buggy that goes ahead of the hearst.
They gave me an old horse that is thirt
years old, that has not been off a wal
since nine years ago, and they told me
give him a loose rein and he would
along all right. It's the same old hors
that used to pace so fast ON the avenue
years ag,, but didn't know it. Well, J
want to blame. just let him wall
along as though he was hauling sawdust
and gave him lopse rein. When We
got of the pavement the fellow tina
drives the heorse, he was in hurry
cause his folks was going to have duck
for dinner, and he wanted to get back
SO he kept driving alongside Of my bugg,
and telling me to hurry up. l wouldn
do it, cause the livery man told me t,
walk the horse, for it was funeral Thel
the minister he got nervous, and said h
didn't know as there was any use o.
going so slow, because he wanted to ge'
minister's meeting in the afternoon, but
/ told him we would all get to the GENE.
terry soon enough if we took it cool, AM
as for me, wasn't in no sweat. Thel
one OF the drivers that was driving TIL,
mourners, he came up and said be had to
get back in time to run wedding down
to the one o'clock train, and for me to
pull out little. / have seen enough OF
dsobeying orders, and told him fun,
cral in hand was worth two weddings ii
the bush, and as far as was concerned,
this funeral was going to be conducted
in q decorous manner, if we didn't &c
back until the next day. Well, the min
lister sail in his regular Sunday. .schoo
way: My little man, let me take hol
OF the lines, and like darned fool
gave them to him. He slapped the ol
horse on the crupper with the lines, an,
then jerked up, and the old horse stuc
up his oil ear, and the hcarse driver toll
the minister to pull hard and saw on tn
bit little, and the horse would wax
up. The hearse driver used to drive tn,
old horse on the track, and he knew
what he wanted The minister took o
his black kid gloves and put his umbrell
down between us, and pulled his ha
down tight on his head and besan
pull and saw on the bit. The old cripple
began TO nave along sort of sideways,
like hog going to war, and the minis
ter pulled some more, and the hears
driver, who was right behind, he said, 8,
you could hear him clear to Waukesba.
Yee'up,' and the old horse kept goin,
futeri then the minister he thought th'
procession was getting teo quick and b,
pulled harder, and yelled whoa, an
that made the old horse worse, and
looked through tle little window IN the
buggy top hehind, and the hearse Was
abont two blfets behind, and the driver
was laughing, and the minister got pale,
and said, Ny little man, guess you
had better drive and ! said, Not much
Mary Ann, yop golllp't LET me lup thir
funeral the way ! wanted %, and nov
yon eap blss It, il you viii lel me gfi
saI' baE llsFs wss . sIrssE esF ahsad,