The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1883-12-20
OUR SCRAP BASKET.

CDR. Bell has been elected President of the
Cincinnati Dental Society" His patients know
him by his wiring.
smartest youngster is willing to admit that
there is Santa Claus.
They are lawing over the copyright of Oscar
Wilde's portrait. All old boot will probably be
the next subject of litigation.
A drunken brute in the Chicago Academy of
Music cried "fire," and got up a stampede. The
fire was in the brute's stomach.
The editor of the Portsmouth Times is terribly
down on the police of that village. It's bad
sign to see man afraid of the police.
Lawrence County is trying to keep up with
us in murder trials, but can't quite make it. On
one point, however, we must yield. Ironton
has baseball club.
A Danvflle, Va, farmer named sledge pur-
chased new revolver, and practiced with it by
shooting colored man, in his own shanty.
What fitting time to 'swing the Sledge!n
Han exchange says that ian old criminal law
yer has discovered through experience, that a
majority of those convicted of crime are inno-
cent? He prabably takes their word for it.
Alfred Tennyson has received a title-he's a
baron. Mike McGonnigal has also received a
title-much more substantial and honorable.
Mixes is the title to a forty-acre lot, which he
earned, and paid for, himself.
Mrs John Howie, of Homerville New Bruns-
wick, gave birth to four boys. That's a sign of
war. Had they been four girls, it would have
been sign that four men would be snatched
bald-headed in just nineteen years.
''I have girl in every town 1 have visited,
who will eagerly watch for me when come
again!" boasted dude drummer. ''Adzackly!'
replied bar-room loafer. tive know ye hev,
an she's washer-woman"
A Cincinnati clothing clerk named Stocking
was arrested for stealing, few days ago. and
after he had told his ''yarn," the detectives were
satisfied that several parties in New York are
ready to ''darn" him.
In order to control the pacific sugar trade, a
man named Spreckels has purchased eighty
million pounds in Hawaii. Spreckels is now
watching the market reports and singing "The
SWEET By-ard-by."
The market reports say "the Iowa pool is bro
ken, the Denver pool will be broken" and SO
on. If the pool in a halfdozen Jackson dogge-
ries were broken up, it would be joyful.
Kentucky Democrat refused an office in
Washington last Wednesday,. This is perhaps
the only case ON record, But then, he is news
paper man, Stealey, of the Courier-J Journal.
That's a bad name for an officer, any way.
A pair of Cincinnati mules ran away with a
street car one day last week. They ran into
another car, but we are assured by the report
that they 'didn't hurt the car, although the
passengers were scared"
Frank James is an excessively popular man.
He was released on bail at Kansas City, Mo-, on
last Thursday, and as he came out of the Court
House there were half a dozen men waiting to
receive him with open arms. They were Depu-
ty Sheriffs from different localities.
Philadelphia physicians who examined a
murderer, recommend that he be confined, and
that place be secured for the "criminally in
sane" Jackson County has such place. They
going TO set it up in short time, between
the Court House and Jail, and criminal lunatics
will be admitted by way of a double trap door.
The Ironton Irontonian reioices that the
Democratic Legislature will shut down on the
plan of giving railroad passes to members of
the Legislature, as then the members ''would be
in Independent position" Can it be that
Democratic Representative with railroad pass
in his pocket feels himself bought?