davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
A Farm Experiment,

Mr.. Bungstarter, the well-known sa-
loon keeper of this city, retired from
business early in the fall and bought q
farm in Jersey.
They arrived at the farm all right
and slept well, Notwithstanding the eff
forts of the dogs and mosquitoes to pre-
vent it. The next morning the child
rem went out to have a swim, and one
of them didn't return in two weeks,
and then he was so thin that even his
name on his shirt couldn't be recog-
nized. Grandma Bungstarter dropped
her spectacles into the hay-cutter, and
in endeavoring to pull them out made
her hands as thin as a tishermans S yarn.
Mr.. Bungstarter bought three cows,
but when he ascertained that they had
only one row of teeth apiece he swapped
them off for calves. These didn' t
grow but one set, and then Bungstarter
got mad.
While Mr.. Bungstarter was cleaning
out the stable one day he saw big fly
on the mules back. 1t was annoying
the mule very much and Mr.. Bung-
starter attempted to harpoon it with a
pitch-fork. Then the mule shook
hands with Mr.. Bungstartef and made
full-grown oil painting of him on the
back fence.
After the funeral Mrs. Bungstarter
attempted to run the farm herself.
While she was ploughing one day the
horse ran away. Mrs. Bungstarter
held on bravely, and might have stopped
the horse before it reached New York
had not the plough stopped to have a
chat with a stump. Mrs. Bungstarter
suddenly became aware that there was
something the matter, and went over
her own head to see if the horse had
lost shoe. Then the horse started
merrily onward, and ploughed Mrs.
Bungstarter under and mixed her up
with daisies, and huttercups, and
snakes. The horse kept on until it
reached an old well, and then dropped
in to have drink. 1t drank itself to
death.
The remaining young Bungstarters
were smoking in the barn, and the barn
got jealous and began to smoke. too.
When it got through there was no.
body left to run for the doctor but the
Maltese mule, and he laughed until he
split himself in two.-NeW York
World
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
A Lure for Trout and Black Bass

Is suggested by one of the writer's to a
sporting periodical that is somewhat
novel. He says that he has used it for
thirty years, and never saw its equal as
bait. The skin of the neck and the
head of fowl, with speckled and red
feathers, cut into narrow strips with the
feathers on, makes most enticing bait,
and it may be used fresh, or be- kept
picked in salt brine from fall till
spring. Hs says:
when on the hook it is a most en-
ticing bait, and being tough hangs on
we'll and looks bright. ! have caught
a basket of trout with one bait Some
times you may want bait like bug
or grasshopper, or large miller; this
you can closely initiate by leaving on
one or two feathers. Sometimes by
cutting from the wattles near the bill,
with feather or two, or a piece of the
comb and a piece of the little feathers
attached, will lure trout when moth
ing else will" !"
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
What a pretty name!' she said to

What a pretty name!' she said to
herself
When he left her for few moments
in the telegraph Office she had no suspi-
cion of what he was about to do. How
could she guess that he went to pawn
his watch in order to continue the search
for her father?
He returned with the money, and with
the aid of the directory every hotel in
the city was telegraphed. Mr.. Brandon
was at none of them.
What should he do with this fright
ened, trembling. weary little girl? She
was so sweet, so young, so innocent that
he could not grow impatient, but what
| was he to do? A young man who had
arrived in the city in Search of position
some two months before, who had not
found one yet, and who had not lady
friend in the great metropolis, or any
| money beyond the remnant of the sum
brought by his pawned watch
L He was also growing desperate. 1t
was now IL o'clock, fast going on for
| midnight Suddenly possibility oc-
Cured to him.
LET us 60 back to the depot" he
said. .''Your father may have come for
you. He may be known there. Come,
don't lose heart"
He helped her into a car. She was
faint with fatigue and terror, and white
as marble, so that when the depot lights
| fell upon her he was terrified.
| There was little crowd in the room,
| and great excitement. Somebody was
sobbing violently.
''What has happened?" he asked of
an officer who was pacing the room.
Lady passenger lost-fell or jumped
off on the road. They've found her
| her body. That's her father yonder.
He's crying like child" answered the
man.
Belle gave shrek.
Its metz she gasped. ''That's papa!
Oh, go tell him!'
And young Perry, leaving her where
she stood. rushed into the group and
| exclaimed to the heart-broken gentle
man that his daughter was safe.
| Again Belle was the center of all
eyes, but her father was with her now;
| her troubles were all over Explana-
| nations were made; the story was told.
The three drove off together in car
riage, and young Perry felt that there
was such an emotion as gratitude left
in this wicked world. By pure accident
| he had taken fortune at its turn.
A position in Mr.. Brandon counting
house came first. Then he was received
as welcome guest at his home, which
was in an elegant flat-house, not at an
hotel at all; and to-day they are mar
ried, Belle and Percival 1t is a love
match of the most romantic sort, and
her money has nothing to do with it.
Still it is very comfortable to be 3
millionaire's son-in-law
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

The Cane Ood Juries.

The article on Cape Cod in the Sep
tember Century is picturesque both as
to the pictures and to the text which
includes the following: Three or four
years ago case was tried at Barnsta-
BILE, in which a lawyer from distance
was concerned Talking over the pros
rural jury, who knew nothing of the
world beyond their own door-yards, of
course he could not expect very in
telligent consideration of the case.
Some one took pains to inquire who the
jurymen We're, and it turned out that
eleven of the twelve had been either all
oyer the world, or pretty nearly all
over their own country, as masters of
vessels or in some business of RESPONSE
bility, and that the twelfth was SUBJ
stantial farmer.
g In view of such juries as these, it
seems almost a pity that the people
of Cape Cod do not show a litigous
spirit and improve their opportunity.
In fact, the courts have hardly business
enough for exercise. Although there is
wealth there, the little county having q
valuation of sixteen millions, and al
though there is a boundless field for dis
putes in claims under the cranberry
howage statutes, and in fishing and
beach privileges, there is in fact, no liti-
CATION OF any account. There are we'll
to-do populous villages on the Cape
which probably have not furnished a
lawsuit for twenty years. The popula-
ton of the county is thirty thousand,
and there are only five practicing law
yers. Perhaps general familiarity of
the world has had its influence in i'm
parting a certain good-humored tact in
settling controversies.
"a characteristic story is told of a
jury case at Barnstable. A man was
tried for violent assault. In argu-
ment, his counsel, who was from an in
land county, alluded to the fact that
the injured person had not called a
doctor to wounds which he had describ-
ed as serious, and based the defense
largely upon this. He saw no possible
answer to his argument. But he did
not know his ground Judge Marston,
the district attorney, afterward Attor-
ney-general of the State, was born and
bred upon Cape Cod, of a family of
Barnstable lawyers, and he had his
ready answer. Gentlemen" he said,
you have heard the plausible argu-
ment of my ingenious young legal
friend, who has come from a distant
city to enlighten your benighted under
standings, and you see through his So
phistry. You all know Captain -,
the father of the victim of this assault !:
you know what our young friend with
all his learning, has plainly never dis
covered. that man is not master of q
ship for thirty years without learning
how to deal with wounds, and you know
well that there is no doctor on Cape
Cod who can heal cuts and bruises bet
ter than the Captain can. Why should
he have sent for doctor ?''
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
The Spoiled Lily.

A New York correspondent SAYS: The
Jersey Lily is very fond of money, but
apparently not as much for its own
sake as for what 1t will do for her. She
is very eXtrayagant and must have the
most luxurious things. She PROPOSES
to manage herself next year. vet She
has not the slightest ides. of business.
nor the least appreciisc. sc.tion of public obli-
cations She IS rather O spoiled child
than q VICIOUS one. Personally sbe is
perfectly helpless, and she says that she
could not dress or undress herself with
out the assistance of her maid if her life
depended on it. She will lie in bed till
evening waiting for her maid rather
than try to dress herself. If she wants
thing, she wants it; and if she can't
have it she will cry like baby. She
couldn't get a certain room that she
wanted in western hotel, so she sat
down on the stairs and cried like a
child. In another hotel she found two
of the creatures Mrs. Carlyle spent two
hours in destroying in her bed, and she
got up at O'Clock and went with her
entire suite to her car, where she finish
ed out the night. To avoid this plague
and other annoyances, Mrs. Langtry
will live aboard her car next season.
She made mistake in going back to
England. She will, of course, never be
received there by the same set again.
Not that there are not just as fast wo-
men as Mrs. Langtry in its innermost
circle, but they assume virtue if they
have not.
l see that Miss Work Is going over to
England to rejoin her friend Miss Cham
berlain Miss Chamberlain is the
American beauty who has to certain
extent taken Mrs. Langtry's place in
the regard of the prince Of Wales. Miss
Work and Miss Chamberlain were the
two young Americans who accompanied
the prince to Hamburg last summer, to
the scandal of one class of people and
the envy of another. Wales likes them
because they are SO lawfully jolly, you
know;" they whack him on the back
and smoke cigarettes with him and
amuse him greatly, and the old gentle
man is very fond of those who amuse
him. The princess is not so fond of the
two Americans; she thinks them exceed
ingly fast and vulgar, and, though she
allowed them to visit her to save more
scandal, she treated them in way that
American girls have the reputation of
resenting.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
Ton Late.

A New York broker who reached q
village in Ohio the other evening was
interviewed, soon after placing his
name on the register, by farmer, who
said
81 just wish you had arrived here
this afternoon?"
ANY excitement" replied the brok-
er.
''Well, I should say so. My son,
Daniel, was convicted of stealing seven
sheep, and has been held to the higher
court. You ought to have been here!'
''Why?"
why; I'd have had you on the jury,
and you could have cleared Daniel slick
as grease. Our folks here don't look at
such things as you New yorkers do. -
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
a Sensible Parrot.

Three weeks after the great fire in
Chicago, in 1871, | saw parrot which
had saved itself from the general fate
OF all household treasures there. 1t
hSd belonged to my old friend, Mrs.
Kirkland, and was doubly cherished by
her daughter.
When it was evident that the house
was doomed and the red wall of flame,
urged by the hurricane. was sweeping
towards it with terrific speed, Miss
Kirkland saw that she could rescue no.
thing except what she instantly took in
her hands. There were two objects
equally dear-the parrot and the old
family Bible-but she was unable to
carry more than one of them. After a
single moment of choice she seized the
Bible and was fastening away when
the parrot cried out in loud voice.
Good Lord, deliver us !" No human
being, think, could have been deaf to
such an appeal the precious Bible
was sacrificed and the parrot saved.
The bird really possessed superior
intelligence. l heard him say Yes y
and Z" No " in answer to questions, the
latter being varied SO as to admit alter
nately of both replies, and the test of
ms knowledge was perfect. In the
home where he found refuge there
were many evening visitors, one of
whom, a gentleman, was noted for his
monopoly of the conversation. When
the parrot first heard him it listened in
silence for some time then, to the
amazement and perhaps the confusion
Of all present, it said very emphatically
I" You talk too much ! !" The gentle
man, at first somewhat embarrassed,
presently resumed his interrupted dis
course. Thereupon the parrot laid his
head on one side, gave an indescribable
and comical /" FL m-m !" and added.
There he goes again ~ If there
ever was an 0iseau terrible it is the par
rot his instinct for discovering ways
and means for annoying, is something
diabolical 80
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
Ballads of Difficult Rhymes.

With certain rhymes it's hard to deal;
For silver we have neer rhyme.
On orange" (as on orange-peeD
The bard has slipped full many time. =.
With babe there's scarce sound WILL
chime,
Though astrolabe" fits like glove;
But ye that on Parnassus climb,
Why, why are rhymes so rare to love
A rhyme to cusp" to beg or steal,
I've sought from even song to prime
But vain is my poetic zeal,
There's not one sound is worth =" dime. "
fBilge,n' "coif," "searf," window deeds OF
crime
I'd do TO gain the rhyme thereof,
Nor shrink from acts of moral CRIME
Why, why are rhymes so rare to love
To "dove" my fancies fit and wheel
Like butterflies on banks of thyme.
Above 2"--or shove ?" alas ] / feel
They're too much used to be sublime,
] scorn with angry pantomime,
The thought of move" pronounced az
.Et "muvo,
All, in Appollo's golden cline
Why. why are rhymes so rare to love !?
ENVOY
Prince of the lutte and Tyre, reveal .E.
New rhymes, fresh minted from above.
Nor still be deaf to our appeal,
Why, why are rhymes SO rare to love !?
Pail Mall Gazette.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
A railroad restaurant sandwich Sc,

A railroad restaurant sandwich sent
among some minerals to the Concord
School of philosophy puzzled that body
more than little. Finally the major
ity decided that it was piece of rock
of the palezoic age, while the minority
contended that it was fragment of an
exploded meteor. -Norristoscas Herald.
How is il" asked Mrs, Fogg, "that
you take so much interest in other wo-
mems face and dresses, and none in
anything that belongs to me?" when
you 60 to a strange city, " replied Fogg,
'.you run about to see all the places of
interest; but you never think of visiting
the lions of your native town."
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

A Saginaw man has sued the Singer
Sewing Machine Company for a few
cents He claims that his wife was
given trade dollar at the company's
store, and the demand to give stand
ard dollar for it was refused. As the
sewing machine company is rich and
the plaintiff is red-headed and as gritty
. fellow as there is in the valley, it is
believed that this trade dollar question
will be settled right here.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

FoR twenty years / was sufferer from
Catarrh of the head and throat in very
aggravated form, and during the summer
months with Hay Fever. procured a
bottle of Elys' Cream Balm and after
few applications received decided benefit
was cured before the bottle was used.
Have had no return of the complaint.
Charlotte Parker, Waverly, N. Y.
One and enc half bottles of Elys'
Cream Balm entirely cured me of Fay
Fever of ten years standing. Have had
no trace of it for two years. Albert A.
Perry, Smithboro, N. Z.
Since boyhood 1 have been troubled
with Catarrh and Hay Fever, and have
been unable to obtain permanent relief
until used Elys' Cream Balm. 1t has
cured me. e. L. CLIcKENER, New
Brunswick, n. J. Price 30 cents.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
EXCITED THOUSANDG

All over the land are going into ecstacy
over DR.. Kings New Discovery for
Consumption. Their unlocked for re-
covery by the timely use of this great
life Saving reme9y, causes them to go
nearly wild ip its praise. It is guaran-
teed to positively cure Severe Coughs,
Colds, Asthma, Hay Fever, Bronchitis,
Hoarseness, Loss of Voice, or any affec-
tlon of the Throat and Lungs. Trial
bottles free at Robinson & Henrich's e
prug Store. Large size $1.00. 2
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
The Flathead Indians Not Flatheaded.


About seventy miles from the north
ern boundary of the United States, in
the Territory of Montana, between the
western slope of the Rockies and the
more westerly chain of mountains
known as the Ceur d'Alene, and, as
you travel further south, as the Bitter
Root, lies the reservation which has
been assigned to the tribe of Indians
called the Flatheads; and probably no
tribe have adapted themselves more to
the manners of civilization at the ex-
pense of their former customs and
habits than these. Why they are called
Flatheads no one in their part of the
country seems to know. They do not
fiatten their children's heads, nor is
there any trace or tradition among them
of such custom having been practiced
formerly; and as their Indian name is
Selfish, it is probable that the name OF
Flathead was given to them, as often
happens in this country, through the
Hnaccountable. freak of some traveller.
-NeU York Sun.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

A Cuban lady at Atlantic City lamps
into the sea from drygoods i@gox on
the beach and turns a somn. n.ersault.n -
All the brilliant and intellectual accom-
plishments are not possessed by the
American belle, after all. And it is
hoped the latter, in her determination
to excel, will not turn & double somer-
sauit into the sea trom two dry-goods
boxes NorTrstown Herald.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

CARES OF LIFE.-As we come to them
they are received, borne with, and passed
over with no more than thought, if we
are in the injoyment of health, but if
suffering with Piles or skin disease of
any kind they magnify hundred fold.
Emil Fischel or F. q. Bnerstatte the
Druggists, have DIR. Bosanko's Pile
Remedy which is an absolute clre for
any effection of this kind and is sold at
so cents. 2
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
FRED. SEEGER,

OFFERS TO HIS FRIENDS AND THE PUB
~ lie generally, choice selection of Fresh
Hams, Shoulders, Sausages, Tallow and Lard al
the lowest rates. Market on Commercial Street
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
8 8 SANDERSON

NANUFACTURERAN AND DEALERIN BOOTS
W Shoes, Leather, &C, sc. Shop on Bunale
Street, near the corner of Eighth. Repairing
neatly and promptly executed.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
WILLIAMS HCUSE,

A d. SMITH, PROPRIETOR, CORNER OF
"A. Eighth and Franklin streets, Manitowoc
s first-elass American Hotel, centrally located
offers every inducement TO the travelling public.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
BARBER SHOP.

IARL PANGBURN'S Barbershop, in Barnes
Cblock on North Eighth street. Work done in
good taste Particular attention paid to Ladies
and Children's hair cutting and shampooing. BY
all means call and see Carl.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

Mrs. Frank Leslie denies that she is
going to marry any French count OF
German baron. That's right What's
the use of going abroad for nobleman
when you can find one behind chair
in any barber shop in this broad repub-
hcp
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

HOMEOPATHIC PHYSICIAN, SURGEON
IL and Accoucheur, late resident Physician at
me Hahnemann Hospital, Chicago, has pegman-
emily located at Manitowoc. Office, on Buffalo
streets, west of Rands store.
-, r,o 8 to 3 A. NJ,
DfioS AooAo' to and Z to 5 P. M.
Diseases of the eye and ear treated.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
CHARLES HOVER

NTERCHANT TAILORING ESTABLISH
Nl ment, on 8th street, near south end of Bridge.
The tailoring department is complete, and coll-
tains a large assortment of fashionable cloths and
Gerrs furnishing goods constantly on hand
Please call and examine before purchasing else
whore.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
VIM. M. SEEGLR.

nENTIsT. OFFICE UPSTAIRS IN ANDER-
IL sons Block, Corner South Eighth and Quay
Streets Manitowoc, Wis. Prompt attention will
be given 10 al work entrusted TO me. apr21-S1
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

u great big man calls you liar,
treat him with contempt, Donot, how
ever, make your contempt too conspicu-
Gus.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
MRS f.. X ERN

WORK STREET, MANIToWoC, WIS, DEAL
Il er in Dry Goods, Groceries, Crockery, Fancy
Goods, Glass ware, Boots AID Shoes, Ready made
Clothing, Paper Hangings, Hats, Caps, Toys, Chill
dren Carriages, Live Geese Feathers, Bird Cages
Kerosene Oil and Lamps, SC, sc. share of pub
c patronage is solicited.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

AN Indiana State Prison convict says
that his downward course began by try
ing to beat 2:40 with 3minute horse.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
M. KETTENHOFFEN,

In Ninth streets Manitowoc. Travellers will
here find the best Accommodations, Sample rooms
attached.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

PHYSICIAN, SURGEON u ACCOUCHEUR.
Has again permanently located in Mani
towoc Office on North Eighth street, near the
bridge, opposite Torrisons new store. 13sep83
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
r. K. PAINE, NJ. D.,

physician and Surgeon, successor to Doctor III.
Coakley. Office on York street, near Eighth,
Manitowoc, Wisconsin. sep 10
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
A. G. FRASER, NJ. D., O. NJ,

PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON. OFFICE AT
Residence of DR.. +. Simon, Hancock street,
near the court house, Manitowoc, VIA. del5
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
DIR. FRANZ SIMON.

DREWER AND MALSTER, CORNER SIXTH
ID and Washington streets, South side. Ihe
hi CHEST cash price paid for Barley.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
II n MARKHAM
WILLIAM RAHR,

A TTORNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW,
N ONCE, corner OF Sth and Quay streets, Man
Itoy,oe Wisconsin.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
G.. G.. SEDGWICK,

TroRNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW,
a Office in Torrison's brick block, north end
Sth street bridge, Manitowoc, Wisconsin. Collec-
tions promptly attended TO.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
@. G.. BARNES, M. D, !,
f. S. LUHMANN, M. D.,

DHYSICIAN AND SURGEON. OFFICE wITH
DIR. j. +. PRITcHARD. Hours: 8 to 10 A. M,
IL to and TO z. NJ. lmaro
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27

@. Il. EsrABRooK. ", a. AlAhh
ESTABROOK & WALKER, =
A TTORNEYS AT LAW. Office corner E1ghth
n and Franklin streets, in Woods Block over
Waaner's store South Side. Manitowoc, WIS.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1883-09-27
Do you ask how I came
To be locked in this cell?
Find out If you can;
If not. 90 tn HI

is the reflection of mind not chastened
by adversely. ''Slippery George" con.
veys g warning from experience: "Keep
cool or they will put you down stairs,
and it is HI Of bad place. Take
my word for it. | was there;" and
another who s'has been there records
the following verdict on the wall of the
second cell to the left:
warning to those who sleep here after me-
Five thousand bugs last night did see.
tryed to sleep, but all in vain.
When would be in bed have to get up again
Resp. yours,