Morning journal and courier., 1883-03-28
WHISPERED.

By new telephonic invention 8 whisper I can be heard at distance at 75O miles, bu | that is nothing. When farmer's wife goes l to the door and faintly whispers, "Come to | dinner" it can be heard across ten acre | field without & telephone. e.--Philadelphia News
 Basely ibeled: ''Reach me down thai Webster, Pat" said one of our lately elected l judges to his clerk. ''One of them thaivinl newspapers has been libeIing me and, be ia | bers, I won't stand it. The thieving black guard calls me forensic light San Fran cisco News Letter Yesterday boy 16 years old got tumble on coalhole and was evidently pretty badly hurt. On getting up he swore fuently and a clergyman, passing, paused and asked him why he discoursed so irreligiously, to which the lad replied that he was too big to cry, and, by hockey, he'd got to do something.- Boston Post.
 Those who write for sample copies of the Transcript please enclose a postage stamp, not for publication, but as an evidence that they don't take us for bald-headed philan- thropist, with gold headed cane and an income of $700,000 year, who is printing paper for amusement and paying the post age on it for fun.-Middletown (Del. Trans cript
 During the dessert young Marseillais re- counted that he had had miraculous escape from frightful shipwreck. 'fYes," he said, ''15 of my friends were in ship; it cap sized, and all were swallowed up by the waves" "And how," asked some one pres ent, were you able to escape from this ter rible accident ?'' O." he replied calmly, 1T was in another vessel!"
 Dr. Langer states that the fat of 8 child tscontains less oleic acid, but more palmitic and stearic acid than that of adults, besides being richer in the butyric and caproic acids" Perhaps that is what causes the in- fant to yell so vociferously during the night, but we can not always tell. It may be the richness of the butyric and caproic acids, and it may be displaced pin.-Norristown Her aid.
 wants in attendance at Oakenwold was divided by four or five. two negro girls, eighteen and twenty, went to the nearest village ito hire out-'' The lady to whom they applied could hardly tell the story for laughing q asked if they could cook. Nom, we ain't never bin cook none; Phil allus cook Can you wash Nom. we aint bin wash none neither; Aunt Sally, she wash Can you clean house, then p Nom, least we ain't never bin clean none, and so, {" said Mrs. Nash, 'J went through the whole list of quail lfcations, receiving always the same negative answer. Well, what in heavens name said at last, have you been accustomed to do P HuCinuh QuSkY 1ac6 Df1&nt6n6Q-iSuE9y, here, she hunt for masters specs, and keep flies of ole miss r ''-Philadelphia Times.
 A sHNeLE GIRL
 'Tiz rare when force and fraiIty mingle
 The lovely with the harah and raw.
 thought so in white pine shingle
 And lumber mill lately ssw.
 girl above a platform
 Propelled the shingles 'gainst plane,
 Around was many gross and fiat form;
 Wide search to find her like were vain.
 Her mission to smooth the edges,
 And throw the damaged ones apart,
 She little knew those shaft-like wedges
 Had power to pierce 8 damaged heart.
 Her hair, strewn white with drifting savdust
 Seemed quaintly 2 Ia Pompadour,
 She was seventeen and sweet and modest
 Perchance twere well never knew her.
 Once looked she down and saw staring,
 And made my glauces fewer
 One would not wound with gaze too daring
 That shingle girl of mien deraure.
 Some slightest word, some fafntest token
 Might give in part, perchance, release;
 But oh the Ice might not be broken,
 For shs was working by the piece.