The Evening critic., 1883-03-15
THE CRITIC ABROAD.
Said an old lobbyist this morning:

''The jumbo job of the last session Of the
Forty-seventh Congress was Senator Nor
gan's pet bill, throwing open to sale, in the
State Of Alabama, 100000 acres of iron
lands and 100000 acres of coal lands,
belonging to tho people of the United
States. The lands are to be sold at a
nominal price"
why do you kick at q little thing like
that" asked the Critic, when your stock
in trade is in Just such schemes2"
"Well, / will tell you There are millions
in il, and am not in. We hire Congress
men to represent us, and they agree to do 1t
for 5000 year and the glory, and don't
think they ought to be connected with jobs
Of any kind"
But my friend, you don't seem to
know what the definition of glory is ac-
cording to the rules governing our latter
day statesmen"
"Oh yes, do; / know it means a slice
of every job on the calendar, but don't
think Morgan had time to get into any of
them"
why 2"
g Because he talked too much. No man
who talked as much as Senator Morgan
could possibly find time to concoct job"
"Y0u seem to be little sore; you cer-
tainly had bad time of it this winter"
"You bet There was too much direct
dealing--too many statesmen who were re-
tired for us fellows"
"How do you think it will be next ses-
sion for the boys?'
Worse and more of it. The Democrats
are hard lot for the boys. They are all
grangers. They are opposed to all middle
men. They believe in dealing direct. Our
only hope is to elect Sam Randall Speaker"
How will that help you?"
10 Ill tla ,,,,,t tNaar Ia,
the interest of monopolies and that will
give us a little show. Sam, you know, is
an honest man, personally, but politically
he is id -"
And the member of the Third House de.
parted.
OF the treatment by the EreRing Yester-
day given the Washington Conference of
the Methodist Episcopal Church, now in
session, well.known citizen of Alexandria
writes.
"a notice of this conference in an even
ing paper of your city, on yesterday, was
severely criticised by ministers here to-day.
1t misrepresented both the name of the
conference and the church. There is no
"A. M. E. AFRICAN Methodist Episcopal)
Church holding conference here. II is
true that the Washington Conference
(Methodist EpiscopaD is composed Of col
ored men, but in that Church there is no
designation to show color. The writer that
has betrayed such ignorance Of the leading
colored conference in America may have
been ignorant of this fact, or that there is
another body of colored Methodists whose
Church is called the A. NJ. E."
"Well, have watched this trial from
the beginning, and must confess
that / have been from the begin
ming prejudiced against the defend
ants up to this time" said an old gentleman
in Judge Wylie's court yesterday to some
bystanders. The occasion of the remarks
was brought out by his observing Rerdell
sitting in corner just outside the court
room, and the going to and from him seven
times in thirty minutes by Dick Merrick
with a paper in his hand. Said the old
man:
II think if 1 were Merrick / would
change corners-that is, I would put Rer-
dell in another corner where everybody
could not see him every time went to talk
with him. Rerdell is getting $1.50 per day
as Government witness, and it is alleged
that his father-in-law is employed by the
Government. They are the kind of men
that Merrick likes to deal with"
A few days ago the good-natured Billy
Copeland, one of Washingtons most bril-
liant newspaper correspondents, was in the
Office of General Hazen, Third Assistant
Postmaster General. Billy is clever story
teller, and enjoys good joke as well as
anybody. During the conversation with
General Hazen the subject of the Garfield
fair came up, and the fact that watches
had been voted to the most popular Demo-
cratic and Republican candidates for Presi-
dent was mentioned.
"Yes, " said Billy, with n bit of humor
playing about his eyes, my brother-in law,
Wiggins got one of the watches; but L
can't recall the name OF the other id
fool"
General Hazen laughed at Billy's brunt
manner of reference to his brother-in-law,
as he knew Virgins and Billy are the best
of friends. Billy left General Hazen's room
and went around to the room of Mr.. Thomp-
son, chief of the Railway Mail Division.
Soon Congressman Houk entered General
Hazen's room, and, by q singular coinci-
dence, Immediately drew from his pocket a
beautiful gold time keeper, remarking,
carelessly, at the same time:
by the way, General, here's q pretty
watch, and wouldn't take fortune for it.
I'm proud of that watch" holding it up to
the gaze of the General; "proud of it be-
cause it was voted to me at the Garfield
fair"
Quick as a flash Billy Copeland's COM
ments fitted through General Hazen's
mind, and he sent note around to Billy
and asked him to come to his room. When
Billy entered General Hazen said:
"Billy, that was funny version you
gave of the voting of those watches at the
Garfield fair want you to tell it again
for Mr.. Houk."
Billy didn't tumble. He repeated it with
all of his embellishments, dwelling particu-
larly on the last sentence
81 can't remember the name of the other
d-n fool who got a watch"
But as soon as he had spoken the last
word he remembered the name very
vividly. There were some forid couute-
nances and facial contortions, and a little
embarrassment. Finally Mr.. Houk re-
marked:
"Well, Cope, don't know whether it's
on you or me, but I'll go you one, any
way"
"And I'll iine you for another one
around" responded Billy, and he started
out with the party, remarking something
about little ginger in it made it better
when feller had cold"