The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1883-08-15
WIT AND PLEASANTLY.

There's been considerable talk lately about
'royslty on bsrbed wire" All We can say
is that royalty must feel mighty uncom-
Portable.
A bald-hesded loan, who has heard that
the hairs of mans head are numbered,
wants to know if there is not some place
where he can obtain back numbers2
"Does nobody out here take any interest
in the BEAUTIFUL gems of the prsiries?"
said an esstesn traveller to Kansas farmer
"Ob, yes; the sheep eat tkem," was the re-
spouse.
A newspaper article tells chow Spoons
are Made" A great many spoons" are
made by young people at the summer resorts,
but this article Doesn't devote single line to
that variety.
An old lady who, in her younger days,
had been sadly disappointed in love, hearing
some one say that the mails were very
irregular, said cit was just so in my young
dsyE-no trusting on EN-"
will explain that whenever 1 want a
thing and Mrs. McWilliams wants another
thing, and we decide upon the thing that
Mrs. McWilliams wsnts-ss we always do
che calls that q compromiEe.-Msrk Twain.
A Western paper says: "Ssm Weldon
was shot last night 10 the rotunda by Henry
Parsons" About the worst place man can
be shot, next to the heart, is in the rotunda.
1t invariably proves fatal.-Norristown
Herald.
An Arabian who brought blush to a
msiden's cheek by the esrnestneEs of lis gaze
said TO her: ''My locks have planted roses
in your cheeFe; why forbid me to gather
them2 The law permits him who sows to
resp the harvest"
Mrs. Summerbreeze's new girl was told to
watch the turnover few minutes; when the
lady returned the turnover was burned to g
crisp, and the girl remarked, "Sure. I've
watched it, mum; but it hasn't turned over
yet."-The Judge.
Beecher ssselted In recent sermon that
four-ffths Of the inhabitants Of heaven were
women. TIE Bible fatty contrsdicts such a
theory in recording that, on cert'in Gees.
sion, "silence reigned in heaven for the space
of IN hour."-Ex.
"Were you in the late WARP asked g
veteran of a badly demoralized citizen who
came hobbling down the street on a crutca.
81 don't know how late you mean" was the
cad reply; "she gave me this one last night
before tea."-South Side.
alt is more blessed to give than TO re-
ceiye," as the young man said when ne inn
printed g kiss on his sweetheart's lips. 81
think go, too she replied, ss che returned
the salute, and thus too hearts were made
happy by q single quotation.
Woman who has been looking over blank
ets in q Msin-street store: "Well, didn't
mean TO buy. Am just looking for q
friend" Clerk, politely: Don't think
g. hoh fav,l ro4a
we've looked 'em all through"
Ella Wheeler, in poem, that 1t was cat
the twilight hour when "s dream came tC
my stern hearts door-s sad faced dream
robed in the esrb of Woe" IT she ests ice
cream ana pickle just before retiring, q:
many girls do, such dreams will surely come
loafDg around her stern hearts bolted door
and she's lucky If they don't crawl about her
head and Tighten the wits of her almost
Norristown Herald.
There was servants ball at tho Angel
and Mary Jsne went. Pretty early in the
evening she founced IN With an infsmed
countenance. "Whv, Mary Jane" aaid the
/ nissRs, "surely it's not all over yeti" 'No
mum, but I've been insulted. As / was
comm out of the supper the bakers young
man he says to me, Il hope miss, says he,
! 'your programmes not quite full and me
that had eaten hardly auythingl'
sWhut makes yer sck dat way" asked
old Nelcon of his wife, "a she turned and
looked at woman who passed along the
street. al wanster see whut she's got on,
the woman replied. sNow sin't dat a fine
trick2 Wsnster see whut she's got on. Doan
think dat she's got any OBJ yerse'fs clothes,
/ does yer7 Think dat she's been stealth some
thin, reckin. Come on heah, now, an
/ quit er tryin' ter ack like white oman.
| Arkansaw Traveller.
Sounds from the consulting room: "How
long will it take you to cure met" "Well,
MIR. --, think you can get back to your
desk at the bank in about month, but you
will have to remain under treatment for sew.
eral years.2 ''But you mistake; l am not
Mr.. -, the banker, but Mr.. -, the
letter carrierlp ooh, that alters the case
/ There is nothing the matter with you bat q
/ little biliousness. You will be we'll in 6
month";
Smith had been i'll with fever. Two Of
his townlmen meeting in the street, said
one: allow is SMITH Is he going to get
well7" II hear" replied the other, =" that he
lie convaleecing" 1.-THE deuce he isl" OK.
claimed number one; sspoor fellowI then
suppose it is al up with him." Then he
/ rushed home to search his dictionary, TO see