The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1883-05-31

towards the shanty. and walked up
to the bar, but not alone, for this
time had half a dozen Of my
constituents at my heels. I
threw down the coon skin upon the
counter and called for a quart Of
rum, and Job, though busy in deal
ing out rum, forgot to point to his
chalked rules and regulations, for
he knew that coon was as legal
tender for a quart in the West as a
New York shilling any day in the
year. My constituents now focked
about me and cried 'Huzza for
Crockett Crockett forever and
finding the tide had taken a turn, I
told them several yarns to get them
in a good humor, and having soon
| dispatched the value of the coon,
went out and mounted the stump
without opposition, and clear ma
, jority of the voters followed me to
see what / had to offer for the good OF
the nation.
Before I was through one of my
constituents moved that they would
hear the balance Of my speech after
they had washed down their first
part with some more of Job Smell
ling's extract Of cornstalk and mo-
lasses, and the question being put
up it was carried unanimously. 1t
wasn't considered necessary to tell
the yeas and nays, so we adjourned
to the shanty, and on the way I
began to reckon that the fate of
the nation pretty much depended
upon my shooting another coon.
While standing at the bar, feeling
sort Of bashful while Jobs .ules
and regulations stared me in the
face, I cast down my eyes and
discovered one end Of the coon
skin sticking between the logs that
supported the bar. Job had slung
it there in the hurry Of business, I
gave it a sort Of quick jerk, and it
followed my hand as natural as if
had been the rightful owner. I
slapped it on the counter, and Job,
little dreaming that he was barking
up the wrong tree, showed along
another bottle, which my constit-
uents quickly disposed Of with
great good humor, for some Of
them saw the trick, and then we
withdrew to the rostrum to discuss
the affairs OF the natlOn.
Il don't know how it was, but
the voters soon became dry again,
and nothing would do but we must
adjourn to tha shanty; aud as luck
would have il, the coon skin was
sticking between the logs, as if Job
had flung it there on, purpose to
tempt me. l was not slow in rails
ing it to the counter; the rum fol-
lowed, Of course, and | wish | may
be shot if didn't before the day
was over, get ten quarts for the
same identical skin, and from
fellow, too, who IN those parts was
considered as sharp as steel trap
and as bright as pewter button.
'This joke secured my election,
for it soon circulated like smoke
among my constituents, and they
allowed with one accord that the
man who could get the whip-hand
Of Job Smelling in fair trade could
outwit Old Nick himself, and was
the real grit for them in Congress.
After the election was over / sent
Smelling the price of the rum, but
took care to keep the fact from
the knowledge of my constituents.
Job refused the money and sent me
word that it did him good to be
taken in occasionally, as it served
to brighten his ideas; but [ after
ward learned that when he found.
out the trick that had been played
upon him he put all the rum that 1
had ordered in his bill against my
opponent. who, being elated with
the speeches he had made on the
affairs Of the nation, could not de-
scend to examine into the particu-
lars of bill Of the vender Of rum
in a small way"
"Can you tell me-" asked Twis-
TEN, ''the difference between my