Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1883-09-02
THE BAD BOY.
Packs Misehlevous Youth and His
Pa.
The Deacon Will Not Accept Hennsry's
Resignation, SO He Plays aJOks
and Gets the Eager"

hospital" said the grocery man as the
bad boys shadow came in the store, fol-
lowed by the boy who looked sick and
yellow, and tired, and he had lost half
his flesh. whats the matter with
you? Haven't got the yellow fever,
have y~ou?"and the grocery man placed
= chair where the invalid could fall into
il.
mo. Got the ager," said the boy, as
he wiped the perspiratiOn off his upper
lip, and looked around the store to see
if there was anything in sight that
would take the taste of quinine out of
his mouth. Had too much dreamy
life of ease ON the farm, and been shak-
ing ever S,nee.
Darn u Farm,
anyway
What, you haven't been to work for
the deacon any more, have you? /
thought you seLt in your resignation"
aid the grocery man offered the boy
some hmburger cheese to strengthen
him.
90, take that cheese away" said the
10y :" bC bNAhCN PalE anu SdSGeu.
~ gu don't know what Il sick person
needs amy more than q professional
MUSE. What | want is to be petted.
You SEE | went Out to the farm with my
chum. and | took the fish poles and re-
mared IN the woods while he drove the
hor,c I, the deaCOn's, and he gave the
deacon ny resignation, and the deacon
wuuldut accept il. He said re would
hold NY resignation until after harvest,
AID III, % act on it. He said he could
nut me "a jail for
Breach OF Promise
iiIYuit worn aud left him without Civ
ne proper notice, and my chum came
aud tU!! me, aud 50 | concluded to -
10 wvTN rather than have u trouble,
sn. thv deacon said my chum could
work u lew days for his board if he
wanted To. 1t was pretty darn poor
Irard for - boy To work for, but my
rLum wanted to be with me, so he
stayed. Pa and ma came out to the
farm lO stay a day or two to help. PA
WAS gong 10 help harvest, and ma was
goEgt t. uetp the deGCUn's wife, but pa
wanted % carry the jug to the field, aud
lay under = tree while the rest of Us
voIkrc, aud ma just talked the arm Oft
ils Heacoa'S wife. The deacon aud pa
laid in rh- shade and see my chum and
ne wurk. and ma and the deacOn's wife
gos-iped 80 they forgot to get dinner,
and
Ny Chum and We
organ 4 a strike, but we were beaten
by monopoly. Pa took me by the neck
and ,hra>ued out n shock of wheat with
my heels, and the deacon took my chum
and ~st down on him, and We begged
and they gave us our old situations
back. But We got even with them that
night. | tell you, when a boy tries to
TX good, and quit playing jokes on peO-
pie, aud then has everybody down on
him, aIai has his pa hire him ont on a
taIm To- work for a deacon that hasn't
got any soul except when he is in
church. and a boy has To get up in the
night 10 get breakfast aud gu 10 work,
and hsS 10 work until late ~ night, aud
they nick because he wants 10 put but
ter On hi pancakes, and feed him skim
milk suH rusty fat pork, it makes him
tough. and he would
play a JOke
ON his s.rd grandmother. .After my
rhum al me had got all the chores
done rhar night, We sat out on a fence
hack ufrnr hUu>" in the orchard, eating
green apples i'm the moonlight, and try
Iug go tLluk Of a plan of revenge. Just
then | ~aw a skunk back of the house,
li-lt nv the outside cellar door, and |
tod my raum that il would serve them
right 10 drive the skunk down in the
cellar aII hut the door, but my chum
said that would be TOO mean. l asked
him ii il would be any meaner than for
the deacon To snatch us bald-headed be-
ar- ~. ...,n'lpff pnANv haN- y-a faZf /
enough Tor TWO men to pitch it, and he
said Il wouldn't, and so we got On each
side of the skunk ami sort of scared it
down in the cellar, and then We crept
up softly and closed the cellar doors.
Then We went i'm the house and | whis-
p-re'i To ma and asked her if she didn't
think the deacon had some cider, and
ma she began to hint that she hadn't
rad a good drink Ofcider since last win
ter, and
The DeaeOn's Wife
>aid L. boys could take q pitcher and
90 down in the eel a. and draw some.
Tia, was too much. Ididn't want any
CIDER. a., so / told them that L be-
!uug,d To- "a temperance society, and
-loU'd b..ak my pledge if l drawed
cider. aIt he said / was a good boy,
and lOr NE never to touch a drop Of
cider. Then she told my chum where
the cider barrel was, down cellar, but he
amt no slOuch. He said he was afraid
10 20 down cellar in the dark, and so pa
said he and the deacon would go down
and Graw the cider, and the deacon,s
wife asked ma 10 20 down too and look
81 the fruit and berries she had canned
for winter, and they all went down cell
lar. Pa carried an old tin lantern with
holes in j, 10 light the deacon to the
cider barrel, and the deaeOn's wife had
4 taller candle to show ma the canned
fruit. | tired To get manOt TO go, cause
ma il
a Friend of Mine.
and | didn't want her to have anything
10 do with the circus, but she said she
guessed She knew her business. When
anybody q Y that they guess they
know tkeir W business, that settles II
with me, and | don't try to argue with
them. Well, my chum and me sat
there in the kitchen, and | stuffed q
piece of red table-cloth in my mouth to
keep from laughing, and my chum held
his nose with his finger and thumb 80
he wouldn't snort right out. We could
hear the cider run in the pitcher, and
then il stopped and the deacon drank
out Ofthe pitcher, and then pa did, and
then they drawed some more cider, and
ma and the deacOn's wife were talking
about how much sugar it took to can
fruit, and the deacon told pa to help
himself out of = crock of tried cakeS,a and
heard the cover on the crock rattle,
and just then | heard the old tin lam
tern rastle on the brick floor of the cell
lar, the deacon said, "Merciful good
neNS, ia said Helen damnatiOn | am
stabbed and
Ma Yelled
goodness sakes alive and then there
was a lot OF dish pans on the stairs be-
gun to fall and they all tried to get up
cellar at once, and they fell over each
other, and -, my, what a frowy smell
came up to the kitchen from the cellar.
IL was enough to kill anybody. Pa was
lhe Inst to Het To The head OF