Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1883-02-08
PLEASANTRIES.

If you can't trust a man for tue full
amount let MIN skip. This trying to
get an average on honesty has always
been failure.
The young man who says 'yes?"
with an interrogation is to be married
to the young woman who says "no !"
with an exclamation.
The fair fame OF journalism has re-
ceived another terrible blow. A news
paper man III Richmond has been
found to be full cousin of Oscar
Wilde.
"Oh, Lord, said an Ohio minister in
his prayer at Monday evening class
meeting, Thou hast seen by the morn
ing papers how the Sabbath was desc
Grated yesterday"
When colored man gifts ter be so
well e1ucated that he doan't believe in
de Bible, he hab lost his identity as q
niger, but yet amt fitten ter be class
ed wild de v hite folks.
Toung lady writing loye-letter for
the kitchen maid That's about
enough isn't it? Maid Zone thing
more, Miss just say, "please excuse
bad spellin' and writin'"
81 do wish you would come home
earlier" said woman to her husband.
81 am afraid to stay alone. | always
imagine that there's somebody in the
house, but when you come | know
there amt"
Prince Napoleon took advantage of
Gambetta's demise 20 put ia his claim
to the throne of France He very
soon learned, however, that France
doesn't have throne any more. 1t is
overthrow.
Your husband IS staid man, now, is
he not? p asked former scboolmate of
her TREND, who had merried a man
rather noted fer his fast habits. 81
think so, was the reply. "He staid
out all last night"
"Wife Cant you take me to the
Blank restaurant some evening, my
dear ?" Husband mo, darling, it is
disreputable." Wife "Then, dear,
why do you bring home its marked
napkins in your pockets -
Mechanically son of the famous
Indian Chief of that name, recently
started on featuring tour in Mime
sofa. His first audience yielded him
- so, and he has concluded to return
to his old profession OF digging cellars
His lecture must have been a humor-
Gus one.
The very meanest boy in existence
saw a man in the act OF slipping down,
and yelled to him There's an egg in
your hip-pocket :" The slipping man
didn't have time TO reflect that the
statement was not true, but the frantic
efforts he made to save himself were
terrible to witness.
One of the professors in Cornell Uni
versity, lecturing on the effect of the
wind in some Western forests, remark
ed Gin travelling along the road,
even found the logs bound and twisted
together to such an extent that a mule
couldn't climb over them, so l went
round"
"Haye you any evaporated apples ?"
she asked of the grocer. "Not any on
hand just now, ma'am," he replied.
Don't you keep them ?" Well, | set
out to, but | got 80 discouraged. l
rolled a barrel of Baldwins out IN front
one morning, and before noon half the
lot had evaporated and disappeared.
prefer to deal in the solid fruit"
One of the most popular conductors
that ever ran q train out Of Boston has
the credit of the following BON mot. Not
long since a special minister's ticket
was handed to him, to which ne gave
careful inspection, AS his duty required
The passenger quite tartly remarked
that it was unnecessary to be so parti.
cular about his ticket. The conductor
quickly replied, in his quiet and ever
courteous manner 81 am only looking
to see where you are going, sir. l
don't care to see in the morning papers,
Another minister gone wrong? p