davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
AN UNFORTUNATE LECTURER.

A crowded house greeted Knock Knee
Ike the other night to listen to his lecture
on the Irish question. The lecturer was
introduced by Brocky John, who has just
finished his second term in the peniten-
tiary. Ladies an gentlemen" the lee
turer began, ode committee OBJ inverta-
ton hab requested me ter lecture heah
ter night on de Irish question, but ter tell
yer de truth, dinged if knows whut de
Irish question is. De subjeck hab been
sprung on me wild suddenment an ain,
had time ter study inter de mericks OBJ de
case, but it hab alters been my rule neber
ter disappint crowd, so wild de permits
sion OBJ desc good people, will proceed
ter tell yer whut | knews. De
Irishman amt like a niger, case de
niger was all right while reconstruction
was gwine on, but de lrishman alers kicks
agin reconstruction. When was in the
melishy, eotch Irishman an tried ter
make publican OBJ him, but he wouldn't
reconstruct. Now, has tole yer all bout
de lrishman an hopes dat de committee
will allow me te, tell yer whut | knows
bout de niger. knows all bout de
niger, case Use suthin' OBJ niger my
self. knows dat de nigger's longin' fur
fresh meat has become sayin' all ober
de country, but as de Lawd is my ledge,
| neber stole a pound OBJ meat in my
life.
ust then an officer entered, approached
the lecturer and arrested him on charge
of hog stealing.
"G'way frum heah, man, an lemme
finish dis lecture"
You must go with me to JAIL" said the
officer.
"Oh, Lawd," said the lecturer turning
to the astonished audience, I" doan mind
stealin' de hog, but de tack dat Use been
cotch in lie by SO many foxes mighty
nigh takes my BRET. Wush had stuck
ter de Irish question, case | knows too
much bout de niger, nohow."
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
GOT THE RHEUMATISM.

The old Arkansaw duelist has the
rheumatism, sab. The legs that would
have once proudly carried him to the
field OF honor, are now drawn up. The
heavy, silver mounted pistol is rusty
The glory Of the old mans days is de-
parted. He never killed any one, bu,
then he would have done so ifhis friends,
who were always handy, hadn't inter-
vened. AT one time, you remember, he
swore that nothing but the blood Of Col.
onel Giggles could satisfy him, but a
friend came along and said: That fel
low is beneath your notice" THAT'S q
fact" the duelist replied. Il shall nc.
notice him. Giggles, TOO, had sworn
by his family pride, that nothing
but profusion Of blood could
atone for the insult he had re-
ceived, but friend came along and said
al hope that you will pay no attention to
that fellow for he is not your equal"
THAT'S true,' replied Giggles. :"
WON'T speak to him. Thus was bloody
encounter averted. Years afterwards the
two gentlemen met and talked of the
good old dueling days when a man could
take care OF his honor. The invention OF
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
An Old Veteran Dead.
London Daily News


Pierre Jean, an old soldier, believed to
be the Oldest living member Of the Legion
Of Honor, has lately died in Paris at the
ripe age Of ninety>four. Born in the year
OF the great revolution, he served under
Napoleon in..the Austrian campaign Of
1906, survived the terrible march from
Moscow in 1872, and was taken prisoner
in 1873 before Dresden. II was on the
18th Of March, 1915, during the hun
dred day" Of Napoleon's rule, after the
return from Elba, that he received the
coveted decoration. At the battle of
Waterloo he was sergeant-major in the
Thirty-sixth regiment Of the line. Pierre
Jean, whose destiny it was after all to die
peacefully il the truckle-bed Of an in
mate of the lnvalides, twice received
wounds, one at Koningstein, in 1873, the
other at Namur during the retreat after
Waterloo, both wounds being by a curl
Gus chance on the right leg.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
CHAPTER Ill.

lhAflEk III.
The brave Gamula and the fair Mag
nus met at the appointed time. The day
was beautiful and standing on the great
mountains top, so clear was the day, you
could see for hundreds Of miles over the
possessions Of the mighty Menus the
Gentle. While the lovers stood whisper
ing to each other, the gentle monarch
came from the northeast door of the pal
ace, went around to the southwest corner
and soused his head into barrel of rain
water. The old fellow had been out late
the night before and was somewhat tired
After the refreshing souse, he sought the
garden where he found the lovers.
"Magnus," he said, shaking the rain
water and wiggle-tails from his frosty
locks, land art thou still determined to
become the wife of this rooster from up
the creek 2"
"Yea, father, and this day, at the ap-
pointed time, shall wed him."
May it please the court" said brave
Gamula, do not call me rooster from up
the creek. Cali me Samuel Tilden, the
prize fighter, the champion shoulder
smiter Of Cypress township"
Nay, saucy knave, beshrew thine in
science. l will call thee spring chicken
Why dost thou seek my daughter in mar
rage? Why woulds, thou monkey with
an old mans pridea Upon this girl I've
based my earthly hopes"
And so have J."
"But not as have. She is my only
daughter"
"And she shall, for the present, until
potatoes are cheaper, be my only wife"
"By the links of the chain at Satan's
saw mill, when thou marriest her, my
empire shall be no more. The gods
have told me that il she married against
my wishes, can command this noun
tains eternal destruction"
"Well, begin at once your funny bust
ness, for by the chills and fevers Of my
forefathers, before the sun goes down
she shall be my wife. What sayest thou,
Magnus?"
81 should caper."
"Thou hast heard her solemn decision,
old man. Now what dost thou say p
The king threw himself on bench,
and thought deeply, the occasional con-
vulsive shivers chasing each other up and
down the back-spring Of his architecture,
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
HIGH PAPERS.

" If you print this poem" said con-
tlbutor to an editor, want you to save
me twenty copies of the paper. How
much will they cost'
1.-TWO dollars apiece
What. when | have poem in the
issue:r
Yes, that's why will charge you so
much. Literary matter is appreciated
by US, you see.'
" But won't charge you for the poem"
That's your lookout"
Well, Ill take it somewhere else"
Please don't"
But WILL" and when the poet was
gone the editor grinned.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
Testimony to Darwin.

DIR. W. Is. Carpenter, the great physi-
ologlst, in the Modern Revi<sl,, says there
is no need to 60 back now over the melan-
choly story Of the slanderous attacks
which were made on the greatest inter
prefer of that " order of (organic nature"
who has ever stood between It's author
and man; but they ought to be remem-
oered as a lesson to the theologians of
the future. No one has now ventured to
throw stone at Darwin's grave, since
were any to do so it would bring upon
him general condemnation. The revolu-
ton in public feeling of this country.
which has been silently and almost in
sensibly going on, but of which his de-
par,ure from among US has brought out
the manifestation, has been a surprise no
less TO his friends than it mus, have been
to his former opponents. The highes,
eulogies have been pronounced upon
him from pulpi,s in which he was once
reviled and his life no less than his word
has been held up as model for imitation
where his character as a man was for
merly included in the depreciation of his
achievements as philosopher
Those who knew Charles Darwin most
Intimately are unanimous in their appre-
citation Of the unsurpassed nobility and
beauty of his whole character. In him
there was mo other side.' Not only was
he a philosopher who had wrought a
greater revolution in human thought
within quarter Of a century, than any
man Of our time-or, perhaps, of any
time-and has given what is proving the
deaih-blow to theological systems
which had been clinging yet more tena-
ciously to meas shoulders because of the
efforts made to throw them off-but, as a
man, he exempli6ed in his own life tina,
true religion which is deeper, wider, loftier
than any theology. For this not only
inspired him with the devotion to the
truth, which was the master passion of
his great nature, but made him the mos,
admirable husband, brother and father.
the kindest friend, neighbor and master,
the genuine lover not only of his fellow
man, but Of every creature.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

told how great the struggle was. "If
you only had blood" he at length said,
arising and addressing Camula.
"I'm full of blood.n
ayes, from plebeian sources"
NAY, my grandfather on my mothers
side was a constable, and my father S
uncle drove swill cart"
" Have you the proof:'
fear the records have been lost"
"Then you cannot establish patrician
birth. shall not use force to proven,
this unholy alliance, but tell thee,
that if thou dost marry her, as the gods
have promised, so will | command the
destruction of the mountain"
"All right, me lud, and We both wish you
we'll,
Butwc are going to wed or so ,o-hallelujah
hallalu,
would rather marry her than marry old aun,
Sue
- !. H. Hersrly
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

The Ameriean Journalist, published
in St. Louis, and edited by r. P. York
ston, is new magazine, in fact, Just
started, but it already bears evidences of
success. |, is ably edited and although
it is published in the interest of news
paper men, yet it possesses interest for
every one. The newspaper men of
America are little known. Their publ
cations so all over the country and are
household names, but the men who
make them are in the background. The
Journalist has begun a good work and
we predict for il brilliant career.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
CHAPTER ".

The old king turned away. He wen,
again to the rain water barrel and gave
his head another souse, then going out
IN the lot he mounted the corn-crib and
watched the receding forms of Magnus
and Gamula. About quarter of mile
from the palace lived negro justice of
the peace. To this abode FLAW the lovers
wended their way. When they arrived
the justice was in the midst of an exciting
trial. A negro had stolen a saddle
blanket from highway man and the Jury
was about to find him guilty. When the
justice saw the kings daughter he recog-
nized her. She had given him many a
piece of cold hoe cake, and if the cour,
was acquainted with itself, he was not
going to allow any ordinary business to
interfere with such distinguished visit.
"Whut ken de ole man do fur yer,
LADY,"
Marry me" replied the agitated girl.
:" Lor', chile. Use done got one wife an
KANT marry yer 'eept gets 'vorce, an
sides dat, de white foxes mout kick: but
femme look at de 'vorce law. Mebby |
ken gin myself a sippera,ion an hab de
ceremony formed rite now. Highest
compliment dis nigger's got since he laid
by con-"
You misunderstood me, the girl said,
deeply blushing. Il wouldst that thou
Join me with this young man.
"Oh. yas, sees de pint. Take yer
places dar. Now we's fxed.'
A messenger entered in grea, haste,
and told the Justice that the king COM
manded signal to be given at the con-
elusion of the ceremony. The justice
said that he would wave his handkerchief
from the back window. The messenger
departed and the marriage vows were
taken. The Justice waved his handker-
chief. In moment a great CONFUSION
shook the earth. A volcanic eruption
blew the palace to molecules and col
umn Of fire shot upwards until it seemed
to pierce the sky. The great mountain
rocked and suddenly split, while river
OF lava poured out. The young husband
and wife, the justice of the peace, every
body was swept into eternity. For years
and years, how long, history does not say
and science cannot caculate, the mount
ain burned. The entire country was de-
populated, and where the ambient air
once played, hot ashes whirled in sul-
phurous atmosphere. AT last it began to
cool off, but hot water continued to flow
from the side of fragment of the great
mountain. Trees grew up, and again the
place settled down in permanent shape.
Indians came from the north and south
and bathed in the hot water and were
cured Of rheumatism. Old men, long af-
fected, declared that the water made
them young again, and soon the place
received the name of fountain Of Per-
petual YOUTH" AT last the white people
came and named the place Ho, Springs.
We have often been asked what heated
the water at this famous health resort,
and we hope that our efforts in tracing
out its history will meet with due appre-
citation.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
JOURNALISMS.

The Hoosify is the name Of brigh,
humorous and literary paper, published
at Fort Wayne, Ind, with George F.
Seeley as publisher and w. r. Ream al
editor. Some vile punster will say tina,
Ream is essentially feature Of the paper
business, and will add I've wish to en-
quire how many bundles you print but
this vile man will soon die the death OF
the unregenerated. The Hoosiey begins
we'll and will, no doubt, be successful.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
w ELL OFF.

=" am poor man with eight children"
said man to the president of bank.
@and wish you would help me-"
" How many children did you say"
Eight, sir"
"Well, | haven't bu, three and, yet |
don't grumble. You are well of. Wish
had eight"
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
WASN'T LOOKING.

"Oh, Lordy.' yelled boy running to
his mother, sister mashed my hand with
a hammer
(Which one ?n asked the mother.
al don't know. wasn't looking"
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

revolvers was the first blow dueling ever
received. With the old single barrel
pistol, after the first round, the quarrel
could be adjusted while the weapons
were being reloaded, but with the re-
volver the combatants could continue to
shoot until some one was hurt or fright
ened from the field.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

AcToRs are very much indebted to J. II.
Haverly for sending so many mastodon
minstrel ,roupes over the country, as an
amusement revolution will no doubt be
the result. Poor shows will be brough,
into prominence by comparison, and the
business of the small actor be more re-
muneratiye.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

AT the Southern Exposition suit of
clothes, made from Arkansaw material,
was presented to Governor Berry. So
much, you see, for holding An importan,
office. fthat is the way governors are to
be treated, the acreage Of candidates is
likely to be much larger next year.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

GOVERNOR BUTLER was cordially in
vited to attend the Louisville exposition.
This viii no doubt be announced as
another Kentucky outrage by the pious
gentlemen who mould public opinion in
the east.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
NOT FIT FOR A DOG.

This butter amt fit for dog to eat"
saba gentleman at restaurant table.
"'Zackly, sab, 'zackly," replied the
colored waiter.
There isn't dog in the state tha,
would eat it,
"'Zackly, sab, so sees. Take de but
ter off de table, sah.'
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
MORE INTEREST.

"What the deuce did you lie, that dog
bite me for - said high state official to
a negro.
: Whut did yerse'f LEI him bite yer fur,
boss? Yerse'f's got mo- intrus' in de
matter den is"
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

THE Arkansaw planters are complain
ing that the cotton crop is short. The
planter is a man of extremes. One year
he grumbles because the crop is short
and the next year he complains thatt is
impossible to gather the crop.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

A MINISTER who had passed around
the hat unsuccessfully at a country
church, said, My good people, hog chol-
era has broken out in this neighborhood
and | advise you all to leave the coun-
try.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

All topers are not near-siehted. but
they all use their rye glasses.-BalE-
more Every Saturday.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

Only girls giggle.- Konk<rs Gazette.
The captains gig1 go with rower.-
Roskoa Rsilekis.
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29
Can't yah high yah n and the old

Giant! yah high yah !" and the old
man drew dagger and danced around.
an stab him to the core of his vile heart.
High YAH" and he danced again.
Fathers are always unjust"
81 am not, and here lpray, and know
that my prayer will be answered, that
when you marry Gamula, the bow-leg
reprobate, my empire will crumble and
my palace melt to ashes"
The beautiful girl trembled.
"Oh, | mean what | say" the king
continued, and have an abiding faith
which tells me that my prayer shall be
answered. will use no force to keep
you from marrying the plebeian rapseal-
lion, but when the ceremony has been
performed me,hinks thou wilt see the
fulhllment of my prayer"
"Why should the Ruler favor you
more than meT'
al don't know that, only am man
and am made in His own image. That's
why He favors me. He could not favor
thee, because thou art woman"
"Your reason, dad, is very good, to
those who thinkest thou hast reason,
but methinks that years ago thou lost it,"
when
"When thou vert married to my
mother"
"Yea, lost it then, but since her
death have recovered it, and I'll be
John Drowned if you shall marry the
snoozer.o
"But | will"
"Then my kingdom for house, for
all these glorious grounds will fade.
Where this palace stands will be yawn-
ing gulf"
"And you will use no power to prevent
my marrying ?"
"None."
ooh, you dear son-of-a-gun.'
"What's that ?''
81 was only storming at the cat
The Arkansaw traveler. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1882-1???, 1883-09-29

CHAPTER II.
The night air was softly signing among
the tree tops when the beautiful Magnus
met Gamula in the garden.
"What did the old man say asked
the ardent young man.
mix"
and is the Jig up"
"Nix."
"You are no, going to obey your
father?'
Nixey.'
"Then you are mine"
=" should smile"
"And so you love me better than you
do Kansas City steak
"Yea, more than Chicago pickles"
know now that you are my own"
"Whom shall we get to marry us: A
Presbyterian ~
"No, for he'd be too slow. Well get
justice of the peace
"A negro justice z"
"Nea."
"Can you meet me here tomorrow at
noon:"
81 can"
"But will your"
mix"
Fifteen minutes before dinner. Bring
lunch"
Cheyenne transporter. [volume] (Darlington, Indian Terr.) 1879-1886, 1883-03-12

G.wi HAler,
fIulih e wen,
Kan. NJ on
left siete and
l0l and brass
knob on ci.
thcr horn.
Also Jf on
left side; II
cross II left
side TC left
loin; c'nc'td
LK lying
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-10-05
The Orphans Fair.

The annual fair for the benefit of the
Orphans Asylum. conducted by the
Sisters of Charity, commenced last even
ing at Turn Verein Hall. The members
OF the society were present in full force.
Following are the names of the ladies
who have charge of the various tables:
Ice cream, Mrs. Kenealy, assisted by
Misses Ctimmins and Clancy; fish pond,
Mrs. Childs, assisted by Misses Ward
and Devin; candy table, Misses c. Mes.
mer, Rachel Happ and Helene Vignes;
picture table, Mesdames Pironi and
Auzerais, assisted by Mrs. Coronel and
Misses Ballesteros and Mclaughlin;
hat stand, Nine. Cheyallier, Misses
Marie Chevalier, and Julia Fitzgerald,
Wheel of Fortune, Mesdames McMeno-
my and McCaffery; lemonade stand,
Mesdames Sherman and Straut; flower
stand, Miss Weinshank and Mrs. Ward;
fancy table, Mesdames Ponet and Led.
bury; postoffice, Miss Malejan; gypsy
camp, to be opened this evening. The
fair will continue to-day and evening,
and tomorrow and evening, also. The
display of articles for sale, is extensive
aud beautiful, and is presided over by
corps of our well known ladies, who are
using their utmost ability to make the
fair grand success, which it undoubt-
edlY will be.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-10-05

The above does not show the entire
business of the valley tributary to it, as
there is large amount of our produce
hauled to Los Angeles on wagons, and
a large number of hogs driven there on
foot, and sold to the Los Angeles pack
ing company. By making comparison
of the above figures with the number of
producers tributary to the Downey sta.
ton it will be found that the average is
about 500 per family, TO which, ii we
add the amount that is sold to Los An
geles purchasers, the average earnings
per family will amount to about $3.50.
In making the above estimate of the
earnings Of the families, the grape crop
for the past season was not taken into
consideration, which is no small item.
We have no means Of knowing the
amount 1t brought, but will place il at
$50, 600.
The poultry business Of our valley cuts
no small figure in the earnings, as there
were shipped from Downey station dur
ing 1882 81 $50 dozen eggs, valued at
S32, $50, and 2ll0 dozen poultry, valued
at $500, making a sum total Of S3S, GOO;
to which we might safely add $50, 900 as
the amount of butter eggs and poultry
that found market in Los Angeles that
We're not shipped through the station
but were carried to Los Angeles by ped.
dlers and farmers, making the handsome
sum of S68. coo, which should be placed
to the credit OF the thrifty housewives Of
our valley.
Walnut culture is growing in impor-
tance and favor in this section. Its in
crease this season is about 20 per cent
over last, and will continue to increase
for years to come.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-10-05
No Dodsing for Murderers.

The murderer Mcdowell, convicted of
the murder Of Maggie O'Brien, Of this
city, at San Bernardino. is laying the
flattering unction to his soul that the
Supreme Court will declare the law that
authorizes criminals to be prosecuted
son Information and belief is unconsti-
tutional. As he was convicted uI der
that law of one Of the most diabolical
murders of the age, he presumes that II
the law is unconstitutional he will 20
free. But if the law is unconstitutional,
then he has had no legal trial and has
not been put in jeopardy according to
law and will have to be tried over again.
unless the people settle the case without
a trial, as they talk of doing. Murder
ers will not got off by decision against
the law under which they were tried,
but will be held and tried by indictment
under the old law, which is in full force
and impregnablc. The assassins of our
people cannot get off SO easily. The
way of escape is looked up and the key
thrown away. The gallows still lives.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-10-05
Death of Charles Rousseau.


We clip the subjoined notice Of the
death of Charles Rousseau, former
well.known citizen of Los Angeles, from
the Tucson Citizen, of October Sd;
Charles Rousseau, proprietor Of the
St. Charles Restaurant, died suddenly
yesterday at 3 =. NJ. A week ago last
Sunday he had an apoplectic it, He
gradually failed till death came. Rous-
seau was born Ia Paris, France, and was
SO years old. He came to America
thirty-four years ago, and has lived in
Tucson nearly four years. Before COM
ing to this country be was an officer in
the French army. He came direct to
the Pacific Coast, and was one of the
pioneers Of 40, He joined the first
expedition which went from California
TO Mexico in '5l for the purpose Of taxi
ing the State Of Sonora, after which he
returned to California, where he lived
until removing to this city. He was a
member Of tho French Benevolent
Society Of Los Angeles. The funeral
took place at 4 p. NJ. to-day.