davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

mi Bret Harte was in turn a compose
tor miner, school teacher express mes
seDger and driver OF laundry wagon.
Of Oscar w lde's future plans tho
London World says "He goes back TO
America in the fall, then to Australia,
and 'timately to Heaven Could he
not be induced to reverse the order of
his trip?--M Y. Post.
Abraham Lincoln wrote in 1899.
81 must, in candor, say do not think
myself fit Tor the Presidency. certain
ly am tla'tered and gratiiied that some
partial fr ends think of me in that con
neotion, but really think It best for
our cause that no concerto eHort such
as you suggest. shoul be mad :"
Alexander IL. Stephens was a di-
m nutive man ph, sica v, weighing IL
than one hundred. anil the lower por-
ticn OF his spare body had been the
same ms dead. from pa alysis, 70 twenty
years. but even in this cond ton he has
reformed an emo nous amount of la
Dor. His mind has ever been vigorou
although hi, body was frail. Chicago
Journdi
Rev. DIR. Du Fuy. who has been for
eighteen year. connected with the edi.
torial management Of the New York
Christian Adrocate, has resigned his
os tion. He has q number of literary
and other work. on hand which coinpel
hi attention and take up his time.
ID ring large part of the term OF hi,
editorial connection with the aper he
has done the heavie pa t of the TX.
The death an nouneed, at the age
Of sixty three, Of John Owen. "Owain
Alaw.' the national bard OF Vale He
had for many year taken prominent
part in Welsh musical education and
was ways successful as an inst uctor.
He had assisted at all the Eisteddfodan
he d in Wa es for thi ty years. and had
composed an o atoro, :" eremiah,n
which has long been extreme Y popular
in that country.
M s. Emma B. Drexel, wife of
francis A. | rexcl, OF Philadelphia.
who died recently, was no ed for her
extensive philanthropy. She paid the
rent OF more than l50 families. and dis
tributed among the poor over $4,000
a year. She employed woman TO in
stitute inquiry into the merits OF each
applicant, and once every week dis
pensed groceries. clothing and money
to the poor, who gathered every Tues
day in the rear Of her residence. -
Ihttddei3Daid Press.
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
Mr.. jones' Bcefsteak.

"Jeptha," said Mrs Jones one dav
last week, 81 wish YOU would get a
porterho beei-steak for break asst to-
morrow.
Mr.. ones jaw dropped and he sat
and stared at his wife without speak ng:
at last he inquired ''ls the Governor
Of the State going to breakfast with us,
Mariapn
why. no; suppose we want soma-
thing 10 eat once in awhile If we don't
happen 10 have company" sal Mrs.
Jones.
Z" But good heavens, Maria! have YOU
counted the costp am not million
are and we haven't had another fortune
left to US. How much porter-ho SO
steak do Nou s ppose it will take to 90
round in this famiyP"
"AboIt nine pounds II il was round
steak, or chuck steak. two pounds won d
do, because we couldn't eat it, but every
b te of tenderloin will be eaton Yes,n
said Mrs. j. smackng her lips, "every
bite
Jones went down town like one III a
dream. He hated TO refuse Maria and
he hated to spend so much money. How
ever, he decided that the thing mist be
Gone. So he drew IL large sum from the
bank and went to his butcher.
Mine pounds OF porter house steak, I"
he said. feeling good deal as n man
does when he dictates his last will and
testament
"Yery good, SIR" said the man of
meats, rubbing his hands softly, ~ AIRY,
cut a choice portephouse from Lady
Venus. Thank you, sir! h'anything
morep''
Anything more!' Why, when that
steak was trimmed Jones could have
carried the whole lot home in his vest
pocket his mouth fairy watered when
he saw bits OF white fat, crumbs of bone
and large fragments OF red meat Topped
OF, after it was weighed, but he counted
olt the money, paid for it, and tired to
look happy.
The next morning came; they had all
seen tho steak the night before, and
Bridget had de Jared it would be "a
trate to brile it,' and now they were all
seated around the table waiting for
Bridget to bring it in.
Now children" said Mr.. Jones,
sharpening the carving knife, "don' t
you ask for a second piece of that steak,
IN nd now
Willie mutiered something about be-
ing thankful il he got lrst piece, and
Mrs. Jones was saying she wondered
why they didn't raise beef with more
porter-house meat, when Bridget opened
the door and intruded a ghastly face.
"Howly Moses" sa d she, 'iwhere' s
the matep'
Jones turned deathly pale, and ex-
claimed: 81 am a ruined MANI Mrs.
Jones rushed into the kitchen followed
Y the rest of the family.
There was the clean white meat
board, the hot Goa $ and the broiler, but
n meat; they were still staring at each
other when the milkman stepped in the
open door.
''Isityour meat you re looking a'ter,"
he asked pouring out the regular quart.
"it's about out to Hamtramck now, for
met big llack dog tearing out of the
yard with a beefsteak in his mouth.
The family liled mournlully back TO
the dining-room. There are times
when silence is golden-this was one OF
them. Detroit Post and TriLuRe
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
LocHINEAR Ex COLORADO.


oh, the cow-punchor Bulge has come IN from
In all Goorado his ranch is e best;
And, haring toothbrush. he baggage had
For be calne in me hnste and he came not
Nor vtgiis nor gold to his quest does he
On an errand of love comes the cow-puncher
Blu lge.
A telegram reached him; he called for a
lie rode ninety miles as matter of course;
The last twenty.seven he gnll0ped, and then
lust caught the Altar tic Express at Cheyenne
He stayed not to eat nor to drink, for he knew
lie could pick up meal on the G. d. & 2.
He cot to Chicago the second day out,
But right through Chicago he kept on his
reuie.
Nor stayod to buy linen, nor even a shirt.
He ked flannel best. and he d,dn tmind dirt
With trousers tucked into his boots, said he;
small lds--if get there said bold Robert
Bulge.
From Worth, the Par'sian of awful repute,
He'd come divers gowns to Ang ca Butte,
And parcels from ! liNany ally were slowed
AWAY i'm strong rooms of her iather abo le:
Lut she lanyuished, no. needed the hint, cough
She was bound bound to Fitz James, but she cot oned
10 Budge
But bark! 'Tis the door BELL a symptom of
1ov
Lights her eye" Ahl at lastl" tits messen-
ger hoy:
The maid brings me sage; she TAX IS it, half
dead .
with mingled excitement hopo, eagerness-
dread
Mayors house, on Thursday, at nine; let mo
judge
whatnext; only meet me there.
Faithfully.
"EUDGE."
On Thursday at nine to the house of the Mayor
Two person. came singiy but left 1t pair.
man, and a r,de in a travelling dress,
Went Westward at ten on the Lightning Ex-
piess.
Avoiding at Grnce Church which should have
occurred
At twelve was, for reasons not given, de-
fCrred.
The dowagers called it the greatest of shames;
The men 81 q; It's rough on that fellow Fltz
James,"
The dAmsels declared It was awfully nee,
And vowed they could do il AMI never think
It's chore to get housemaids; you may have
to drudge
AT tho start; butt love you, said cow-punch-
er Bulge.
Life
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
MAGNOLIA, MISSISSIPPI, THURSDAY, MARCH 20, 1888

They come into our garden and eat up
everything, and father said he woul /
| give almost anything to get rid of them
4 Now one OF the traps that my book
/ told about was just the thing to catch
7 pigs with. 1t was made out of Young
I tree and rope. You bend the tree
down and fasten the rope to it so as to
make slippernoose, and when the pig
walks into the slippernoose the tree flies
up and jerks him into the air.
! thought that / couldn't tplease father
better than to make some traps and
catch some pigs; so got rope, and
got two Irishmen that were fixing the
front walk to bend down two trees for
me and hold them while | made the
traps. This was Just before supper,
and | expected that the pigs would
come early the next mo ming and get
caught
1t was bright moonlight that evening.
and Mr.. Ira aud Sue said the house
was so dreadfully hot that they would
go and take a walk. They hadn't been
out of the house but few minutes when
we heard an awful shrek from Sue. and
we all rushed out to see what was the
matter.
Mr.. Travers had walked into a trap,
and was swinging by one leg. with his
head about six feet from the ground.
Nobody knew him at hrst except me,
for when a person is upside down he
doesn look natural; but | knew what
was the matter, and told father that it
would take two men to bend down the
tree and get Mr.. Trayers loose. So they
told me TO run and get Mr.. Schoteld to
come and help, and they got the step
ladder so that Sue could sit on the ton
of it and ho.d Mr. Ira ers head.
1 was SO excited that / forgot all
about the other trap, and, bes dies, Sue
had said things to me that hurt my feel
ings, and that prevented me from III nix
ing to tell Mr.. Schoield not to get him
self caught. He ran ahead of mo, be-
cause he was so anxious to help, and
the first thing / knew there came an
awful yell from him. and up he went
into the air. and hung there by both
legs, which | supposed was easier than
the way Mr.. Travers hung.
Then everybody went at me in the
most dreadful way, ex ept Sue, who was
hol Ling Mr. Travers head. They said
the most unkind things to me, and sent
me into the house. / heard afterward
that father got Mr.. Scho eld's boy TO
climb up and cut Mr.. Trayers and Mr..
Schofield loose, and they iell on the
gravel, but it didn't hurt them much,
only Mr.. Schofeld broke some of his
teeth, and says he is going to bring a
lawsuit against father. Mr lravers was
ust as good as he could be. He only
laughed the next time he saw me. and
begged them not to punish me, be
i was his fault that ever came to know
about that kind trap.
Mr. Travers is the incest man that ever
lived. except father. and when he mar
ries Sue | shall go and live with him,
though ! haven't told him yet. for
want to keep it as pleasant surprise
for him -''Ji0img BrOan," ia Harper 5
YOhnQ PeOpie.
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
ORDERED His Own conin.

A Detroit Mems reporter was joined
by cheerful companion as he weDded
his way from the Central epot this
morning. "Take square look at me-
partner said the fellow without the
ceremony Of an introduction, and tell
me what you think of my general ap-
p,arance"
The +, porter surveyed the man. hut be-
fore he had time to think, was surprised
by another break on his part abo t IN
these words:
my name is John p Boyle. and I'm
from ort Sarnia, and-have Just ordered
my cotlin.'
What?' asked the reporter, or.
dcred YOUR co.hn; not for immediate
use ! hope"
"Yes, sir for my own use an my
own corpse in the bargain" " was the
reply. seriously given.
''Are you sck?' asked the reporter.
just thum1 that breast and see for
yourself was the response. "Mhy
he continued All m complete wreck;
nothing left of me and although / am
over forty We rs OF age, don't remem-
ber the day that was a well man"
''Nhat is your occnpationP
m sailor; have worked ON the
No Invest and John Sherman the past
season, but the iig's up with me now.
won live three DAYS, and am on my
way, to the Marine Hospital to peg
out.
Here Boyle exhibited papers showing
his service and identity, and then went
on TO say;
Now you think it range that /
should go to an underta er and order
co n or myself, but that thing has
been done before, and have as good a
right TO my choice as the r chest, pro-
yided don go over my pile"
BOYLE ratified away this style as he
walked along, seemed to be rejoicing
over his anticipated early demise. and
was ther nhrmed crank or an old
time hummer. Arrived at The post
o ce he parted company wi h the re-
orter and ascended to the Custom
House to obtain ar ne Hospital per-
init. His last words were that the doc
tors at the hospital would assure him
there was nothing the matter, but he
knew he was not more than three days
for this earth. and wanted the reporter
TO watch out and sec if he was n I a
prophet
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
HUMOROUS.
When man $ out o! date: When
he's weak back.
-Hoy II Endad

When man $ out o! date: When
he's weak back.
How il Ended. =
Gray dawn WAS in the Eastern sky,
he ra was tall ng pHtter pa ter;
& ueezed her hand and-weli, no matter
The boot-jaok took me- on the tiy.
"A New Haven lady having noticed
a gentleman acquaintance standing in
hxed position in a ook and paper
store yester ay at ernoon, entered the
store and asked him il he was station
cry. y.-Reqistcr.
"A Kentucky woman has nearly re-
formed her husband by persuadine him
10 use bottles o. whisky as weights for
the clio k. The tener he drinks the
slower the clock goes, and the longer he
has TO wait Tor his mea s.
Prof. Julien assert thatthe brown.
stone houses of New York vii entirely
crumble away in less than one thou and
years. so ruinous is our atmosphe @.
That settles it. We shall not bi d a
brown stone house. Itwouldn be econ
ON .--Norristotcn Herald.
"A book agent tried to SCI Cincin.
natl ! hman copy of ''Hiawa ha. .
Pat looked at the tit and then at III ,
CdnNuSSef' l1Euer Watner, ~ ltP
says he; "be abers the wather in the "a
diggins is quote high enough. me b V,
for any dacent man. Sote oil wild yezr'
~ y AdUer. tser.
-Anewly-marr'ed couple from Way.
hack were in the city YESTERDAY, and,
OF course, found an oyster saloon the
first thing. allow do yol want them,
on the half-shellp" the waiter asked the
groom. "Nah-sir-eel thar's no half
shell siness with this weddin' trip;
give 'em to us on the whole shell. =
HOchest ter lost Dispatch.
=" VIII you have your eggs scram-
bed or poached?' asked second grade
hotel waiter of ag angerly looking hun
CRY man who sat down to table in his
o ercoat "Nuther one" was the
gu ok reply. "rve bee scrarnbling
around and poaching through the mud
all day myself, and have got enough of
it. ! don want any Of our lively city
eggs. anyway "Briny me a sasserful
that have never been set on, and bile m
hull. - Detro1 los.
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29
Important Results from a Suicide.

4 The motive for the settlement of
Georgia sprang from suic de. In his
curious but excellent history Smollelt
sal s, under date of 1873 "The most
important event of this year was a sui
eide in Fleet Prison" A book-binder,
Richard Smith by name, was imprisoned
with his wife and daughter for q trih ng
sum. Under the oppressive debtor law
of England thes despaired Of iher con
dition. and having cut the throat OF their
daughter, hung themselves. They left
note reeting that in killing the r
daughter they had rescued her from a
il worse than death. They begged
their landlord to be kind to Their dog
and cat, and wited that the sixpenee
! they LEFT should te given to the person
/ VINO would deli er The note
England was Mortified at this tragedy.
An investigation was ordered into the
condition OF the prisons OF the kingdom.
] Young Oglethorpe was the heal o this
committee, and entered on his work
with cal and enthusiasm
The best sentiment of the day fol-
lowed the committee. Poets sang its
praises. The pulpit commended its
work. hilo ophers came to the front
with syllogisms. Political economists
offered theories. Rich men contributed
money. Leg slators devised schemes
I. .emagogues declaimed against all law
and glethorpe pat emily found out the
facts. and then devised a remedy.
At last he announced that he had a
scheme o. relief. Iu was accepted be-
fore it was announced whether a bank
rupt law or homes cad bil-but ii it
had been, England would have swal-
lowed it. His remedy was .Coloniza-
ton" new CO ntry--a new chance
Ia new lie new Surroundings and a
new start-these were what he proposed
for the poor debtors
A Utopian State-made up of small
land-holders-in fertile section. where
agriculture would assure an abundant
living-a new civilization. without ex-
travagance or luxury. where there
would be little temptation to incur de IS
anew-a land of resource that would re-
pay the charity OF the mo o'her-country.-
this was the dream of Oglethorpe.
His view was accepted. a committee
was selected to start tie colonization.
An abundance of money was raised.
King George gave large tractof land
living south OF Carolina, on which 10
colonize the poor debtors of the king-
dom The grant was Iece we'd by the
committee. and the new COLONY was
called in honor of the King. "Georga a. "
atlanta Constitution.
The Boston g. Providence Railro a
is app opriating 10 its sw b engines
number of II mes which Dickens made
immortal. Among them are the ssDick
Swiveller, "Sam " el.er," .sMicaw-
Der. and Pancks.n The newes,
switcher. just received from tie loco
motive works. is called s'.Jack Buns
by = a.
The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1883-03-29

John 6. Whittier says nobody
ought TO write after seventy e cctt r.
Holmes and he ought 10 keepion writ.
ing W be Is 9 hupdred.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

I have in different parts Of the country other
tracts for sale.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
RUBBER STAMPS.

For all purposes; Of best workmanship; at
Eastern prices. Manufactured by
L. L. wITTE & CO.,
o30 I'm 1l6 Nadeau block, Spring street.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
Tape Worm.

To those afflicted with this parasite a
sure cure. will remove this parasite
in two hours and bring the head or no
charge, without causing any mconven-
fence or sickness. Persons so troubled
will do well to call at the Grand Central
Hotel, room 2G, where n great many
samples and testimonials from all parts
of the United States and Mexico may be
seen. Respectfully,
2wDcc4 CHAs. A. WILLARD.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Purchasers desrots OF small farms and or
chard lands arc notiied that the undersigned
has subdivided that rich and beautiful tract Of
land at Santa Monica known as the Lucas Ranch
and Is prepared TO sell the same in snalljracts at
the low prices Of from $50 to S75 per acre
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
unn a Woman Il eep q secret ?

A prominent physician asserts that a
woman can really be made quite i'll by
trying to keep great secret; yet, with
out wishing to cause any illness, but
rather TO cure it, we have secret to
impart, and that is, there is only one
thing that will dissolve the poisonous
Uric acid which exists in the blood oI
Rheumatic and Gouty patients. Oi
course you are at liberty to tell the Sc
cret, which is called Salicylica. II
strikes directly at the cause of Rheu'
matism, Gout and Neuralgia.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
sIS-3nl

Eclipse Extra Dry is the wine now
used at all banquets and parties, Con
noissseurs prefer what they know to be
pure wine, to imported champagnes,
three -fourths of which are known to be
adulterated. decl5 I'm
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Please take notice. Any person hav-
ing pledges or collaterals at the Star
Loan and Broker Office, No. Com
mercial street, will please redeem the
same or pay accrued interest thereon
within thirty days from this date or they
will be sold. +. S.-Money loaned on
all kinds of personal property. mr30tf
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
The Physician's Advice.

"What shall l do?" old Aker cried,
''For this sharp anguish in my side,
"This dreadful rheumatism
I've tried all sorts of physic vile,
(Which certainly have cost pile.
"And still I've paroxysm."
The doctor said; "My friend, eschew
These noxious nostrums, OF else you
"Will be too weak to kill cur;
"Give up old physic, try the new,
''Ihe very thing that's meant for you
che mighty Salicylca !"
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

the seecess<
tratos, at his On
fn 0,e City and Cou1
Il " California, the same
OF the busines.
1tor, within four months afte
fst publication Of this notice.
NJ. 7. CUTLER,
the estate Of X. wsinh. l
eles, Cal Nov. 80, 1883. 2
DNER & STEPHENSON.
. Attorneys OF Administrator.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

+. Lindquist, merchant tailor, No. 20
Spring street, is himself a practical cut
ter; and, having had ample experience
in San Francisco and Los Angeles,
knows how to meet the requirements of
his customers. lie keeps a full supply
of the best cloths constantly on hand
and makes them up upon honor"
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
LOS ANGELES MARKETS.

Prices given below are for round lots. Of stan
dard quality, delivered at store or warehouse IN
this city. Small parcels, of qualities or extra
choice grades are not included. On the third
page OF this paper will be found q resume Of
transactions on Change, with review Of the
market each day
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

J. A. Valdez can be found at the Los
Angeles Picture and Art Store, No. ia
Nadeau Block, where he has the largest
stock of pictures, frames and artists
materials south of San Francisco. aul4
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Call at C. +. Heinzemans Drug Store
for Vests Nerve and Brain Treatment,
Won Bulow's German DYSPEPSIA Cure, and
Slavens California Fruit Salt; tie only
agent in Los Angeles county.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Hughes's Russian baths, located No.
3l5 Main ST., opposite the Pico House.
Gentlemen and ladies attended to by
persons of their own sex.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

My own importation; direct from
London ex-ship Blengfel. For sale in
lots TO suit, Special rates given for
large quantities.
WALTER S. MAXWELL,
sIQ On,
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

If you want good.titting truss call
at G. +. Heinzemans Drug Store, l22
Main street, who keeps the largest as
sortment of trusses on hand in southern
California,
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
sLAvENs CHERRY TOOTH PASTE

An aromatic combination for the pres
ervation Of the teeth and gums. 1t is
far superior to any preparation OF its
kind in the markes. In large, handsome,
opal pots, price 80 cents. For sale by
all druggists. c f. Niece, agent, Los
Angeles.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Ladies who are troubled with cramps
and nervousness should drink Damiana
Bitters. 1t is pleasant to take.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Professor Maneho gives Spanish and
French lessons and makes TRANSACTIONS,
No. q South Fort street. decl2tf
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

The old reliable store of c. f. Heinze.
man is still headquarters for drugs and
medicines. lie has full line of patent
medicines, selling them in quantities to
suit at Eastern prices.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
To Whom it NAV Concern

Damiana makes the old young and the
weak strong and healthy. NJ. Levy, &Co.,
wholesale lfqder dealers, agents.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Damiana makes the old young and
the weak strong and healthy. Michel
Levy, wholesale liquor dealer, agent.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

THE HERALD STEAM PRINTING HOUSE,
makes speciality of Legal Printing.
Briefs, transcripts, etc., printed ut low
rates.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Our Holiday mixed candy, strictly
pure, put up in boxes at 25 cents per
pound at GARDENERS,
decl2u 230 North Main Street.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

The First Street Coffee House, % anG
u First street, makes specially OF fine
steaks and delicious coffee. Private
rooms for ladies'. Open night and day.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

For lame Back, Side or Chest use
Shiloh's Porous Plaster. Price % cents.
Sold by C. +. Heinzeman, 100 North
Main street.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27
Portland Cement.

Decorations and wall papers, the finest
and latest, and the greatest variety, at
Raphael Bros, l4l Main street.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

A positive cure for dyspepsia-Dami-
ana Btters Michel Levy, Wholesale
iquor dealer, agents
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

The Mexican remedy for diseases of
the kidneys and bladder is Damiana Bit
tiers.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Sunny rooms with board at 206 Spring
street. Summer terms reasonable.
mar23.tf
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Spanish language. BY Prof. A. Cuya
Main Street. dll-ly
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1883-12-27

Ed. McGinnis has an invoice of the
imported Garcia cigars, and do not fail
to remember it,