Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1883-07-26
CURING A BALKY HORSE.
The Electric Battery Scheme. A DiscOursg-
ing Result

On Thursday a man came into The
Sun Office with the worst looking hesd
on him that ever was seen outside of
0conomowoc. His eyes were both black
ened, there was cut across the nose,
one ear was stuck on with court plaster,
one arm was in sling, and he used a
pair Of crutches. He hobbled in the
door Of the blue room, and asked il the
editor was in, and on being told that
the great prevaricator stood before him.
he spit on his hands grabbed crutch
as one would club, looked wild, and
accepted an invitation to sit down on
the sofa. He sat down. reluctantly, as
though it hurt, and after laying his
crutches on the floor, and feeling Of his
ear to see If it was on yet. he said:
"About three weeks ago you had an
item in your paper telling about a new
scheme for curing balky horses. 1t
was an electric battery to be placed in
the buggy, with wires running to the
horses bit, and when a horse baked
the instructions were to touch button
with the foot, when the electric current
would go TO the horses mouth, take his
attention from his balkiness, and he
would 60 along all right. Do you re-
member such an itemf''
The editor scratched the bald spot on
his head. looked wise, and said he did
remember something about it, and ask
ed the visitor if he had purchased bat
terry and tried it. .....
"Tried it!'' said he, as he picked up
nuo ~ tho nr,,tohao nd GxrnA tho e
on his sprained arm. "Look at me!
Don't look as though 1 had tried ita
tell you these newspapers are doing
more to populate our cemeteries with
their lies about scientific matters, than
all the doctors. Yes, sir. / tried it, and
it is a wonder that am spared to come
in here and maui you. l live out near
Eagle, and have got an old mare that
has been balky off and on for sixteen
years. have traded her off more than
twenty times, and had to take her back
each time or have law suit, and the
first four lawsuits l had about her I got
beat, so l had concluded not to trade
her off any more. 1 read about that
battery, and sent to Chicago and got
one, and rugged it up in the bottom of a
democrat wagon, and fixed the wire in
the bit just as you said. One morning,
about week ago, hitched up the old
mare to take few cans of milk to the
cheese factory, and l was afraid she
wouldn't balk so l could cure her. l
had more confidence in the electric cure
than anything in the world, for two
reasons: First, Ihave always found your
paper truthful one, and second, elec-
tricity cured me of imfiammatory rheu-
matism, which was worse than any
balky horse you ever saw. Well, got
almost to the cheese factory, and the old
mare baked. She had baked there be-
fore, and all the neighbors and the
hands at the factory came out to tell me
how to start her. l told them to all
stand back, and 1 would show them how
to start a balky horse. They stood back
and laughed and l touched the button
with my foot, and l could see that the
old mare got the shock, because she
stuck up her ears and shook her head.
Just as 1 stepped on the button again,
to give her the second dose, she switch
ed her tail around and caught the wire,
which was quite slack, and wound it
around her tail about four times. and
| my foot was on the button. U, hoU she
kicked. l forgot to take my foot of
the button, in the excitement, and kept
the electric current going, and hope
to die if the air was not full of heels,
and pieces of wagon, and milk cans,
and me. She seemed to have strength
of hundred horses, and it seemed to
me as though the whole conveyance,
horse and all, went over the trees as
though carried by a cyclone. and the
wagon came down first, and then it be-
gan to hail milk cans and rain milk,
and the old mare stood there with the
copper wire wound around her tail,
kicking and paving milk cans, and tip
ping pieces of wagon on me. The boss
of the cheese factory got me by one leg
and pulled me out of the wreck, and one
of the neighbors got hold of the battery
and pulled the wire off from around the
mares tail, and she went to eating grass,
and drinking some of the milk that had
collected in a hole in the road, and they
! got me home, and have been in bed
ever since till this morning. l came in
on the train to see what you would give
to settle. don't want to be hard on
any man that is struggling along to
build up a business, but by gaul, it does
seem to me there ought to be bearesponsi-
bility somewhere for such outrages."
The editor looked wise some more,
and finally told the man that if he had
not paid royalty to Edison for the use
of the electric balky horse persuader,
he was liable to be arrested by United
States Marshal and taken to New Jer-
sey for trial on charge of infringe
ment of patent, and that it would cost
him thousands of dollars, so he conclud-
ed to keep still about it if the editor
would, andhe went off, after saying that
he still had faith in the battery, if they
could keep the wire from getting around
the tail of the horse, and as he was 60
ing to take city boarders at his farm
this summer, he would get some of them
to practice on the old mare with the
electric current.-Peck's San.
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