Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1883-06-07
Humorous department.
THE WIDOWS GRIEF.


She was handsome and wealthy young
widow and had just lost her husband. Full
of grief over the loss of her beloved one, she
sought dealer in monuments, friend of
the dear departed.
Seeing the sympathetic face Of her hus-
bands friend, the tears burst afresh from
her eyes as she greeted him, sobbing-
"You have heard it then ?Georgeis gone"
Yes, he had heard it.
"And now," said she, 81 want to get a
monument, the finest and most imposing
monument that you can make. | don't care
for the expense. You have them costing as
much as ten thousand dollars, don't you?
Oh, yes, he could build splendid monu-
ment for that. He would prepare design
and submit it to her.
ssYou will have it ready soon, will you
not ?" she pleaded. "This evening ?"
"No; not this evening" he replied but
he would hurry it up, and bring it to her
residence. So it was settled, and she went
away to wait anXiously for the design.
Then the monument man got out an old
design, had it transferred to clean piece of
paper, and in fifteen minutes was ready for
the widow. In week or so he submitted
his work He found her more reconciled to
her loss and inclined to be critical, but on
the whole she was pleased with the design.
"But," she said, IL have been talking over
the matter with my sister, and she thinks
five thousand dollars ought to buy a very
nice monument. Couldn't you make one
like that for five thousand ~
"No," responded he; "but 1 can build q
handsome monument for five thousand.
Shall make design for one of that tg-
ure?"
ayes, wish you would, please, and |
will call at It your Office in week or two ana
II can make some alterations in this
plan and have it ready very sOon," he urg-
ed. 81 could bring it around tomorrow
Just as we'll as not"
"Oh no: / won't trouble you to do so.
There is no particular hurry about it, and l
will call upon you; it's my turn, you
know" And she smiled graciously upon
him as she bowed him out.
Well, what was a poor monument man TO
do? He could only wait, and he did wait,
busying himself meanwhile, in getting up
elaborate and really beautiful designs. One
day he met the lady on the street, dressed
in the merest apology for half mourning.
He bowed obsequiously, and informed her
that the design was finished, and he thought
it would not fail to be perfectly satisfactory.
"Oh," she said, 81 have been so busy,
don't YOU know, with one thing and an
other, that had forgotten all about it. Let
me see, how much was that to cost ?"
"Five thousand dollars"
''Oh, dear, really can't afford to pay that
much. Now couldn't yOu?" this very be-
witchingly, 'make a real nice monument
for about five hundred dollars: l know
you can, and l will come around and see you
about it real soon good-by."
Then the monument man went to his
office and told his grief to a three-legged
lamb and stone angel.
Some time after this the charming widow
with male friend, whom she called Char
ley" dropped in again.
"Do YOU know" she said, 81 feel SO
ashamed to think that l never came around
to look at your pretty designs. Charley
and l have concluded that those great,
costly ornaments are so foolish, after ones
dead, you know. We think it's wicked,
don't we, Charley?"
Charley allowed that it was.
"But," she confined, "those little white
boards, such as they put at soldiers graves,
Charley and think they are very nice. SO
neat and unpretentious. Couldn't you make
one of them for me, and put Georges mon
ogram on it? His initials make such a
pretty monogram"
Then the monument mans cup was full,
and he spilled it over on them. He told
her that Charley could get an old shingle
and tack one of Georges business CARDS
on it.
Then she called him "a hOrrid beast"
and Charley said he would "lick the
stuffin' out of him for half a cent" and
they sailed out.