Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1883-06-02
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THE BAD BOY AGAIN.

with his pockets fun or angle worms, anu
wanted to borrow baking powder can to
out them into while he went fishing, and
held long angle worm up by the tail and
let it wiggle so it frightened girl that
had come in after two cents worth Of
yeast, so she dropped her pitcher and
went out of the grocery as though she
was chased by an anaconda.
81 AIN going to lead different life, but
boy cant change his whole course OF
life in minute, can he? Grown persons
have to go on probation for six months
before they can lead different life, anu
half the time they lose their cud before
ihe six months expire, and have to com
mence again. When it is SO allared hard
for q man that is endowed with sense TO
break off being bad, YOU shouldn't expect
too much from boy. But Pm doing rs
we'll ms could be expected. amt half Ms
bad as was. Gosh, why don't you burn
.srzg. That yeast that the girl spilled on
the floor smells like it was sick. should
think that bread that was raised with that
yeas, would smell like this cooking butter
that you sell to hired girls"
well, never you mind the cooking
butter. know my business. If people
want to use poor butter when they have
company, and then blow up the grocer
before folks, can stand it if they can.
Blu, what is this | hear about your pa
fighting duel with the minister in your
back yard, and wouudipg him in the Leg,
and then trying 70 drown himself in The
cisiern? One Of your neighbors was in
bore this morning and told nc there WAS
,aurder in the air at your house last night,
.nd they were going to have the police
pull your place rs disorderly house. l
think you were at the bottom Of the whole
business"
80, it's a darn lie, and those neighbors
will find they better keep still about as,
or we will lie about them little. You
see, since pa got that blacking on his face
he don't 90 out any, and to make it pleas
ant tor him ma Invited in few friends TO
spend the evening. Ma has got up and
around, and the baby is daisy, only it
smells like goat, on account OF drinking
the goats milk. Ma invited the minister
among the rest, and after supper the men
went up into pas library to talk. y, you
think 1 am bad, don't You, but Of the nine
men at our house last night am an angel
compared with what they were when they
were boys. got in the bathroom to un-
tanrle my fish line, and it is next to pas
room, and L could hear everything they
said, but l went away cause ! thought
the conversation would hurt my morals.
They would all steal when they were
bows, but darned if | ever stole. Pa has
stole over hundred wagon loads OF water
melons, one deacon used 10 rob orchards,
another one shot tame ducks belonging TO
n farmer, and another tripped oyer grind
stones in front of the village store at
night, and broke them, and run, another
used to steal eggs, AID 60 out in the
woods and boil them, and the minister
was the worst of the lot, cause he took Il
seine, with some other boys, and went to
A stream where a neighbor was raising
brook trout, and cleaned the stream out,
and TO ward of suspicion he went to the
man the next day and paid him dollar
10 let him fish in the stream, and then
kicked because there were no trout
and the owner found the trout were stolen
and laid it to some Dutch boys. l Won
arreh, when those men we're telling their
experience, if they eyer thought of it now
when they were preaching and praying,
and taking up collections. should think
Ihey wouldn't say boy Was going to hell
right off cause lie was little bad now
days, when he has such an example.
Well, lately, somebody has been burgling
our chicken coop, and pa loaded an old
,nusket with rock salt, aud said he would
Iill the fellow full Of salt if he caught him,
aud while they were talking up stairs ma
heard rooster squawk: and she went to
the stairway and told pa there was some
body in the hen house. Pa jumped up
and told the visitors to follow him and
they would see J man running down the
alley, full Of salt, and the CROWD followed
him. Pa is shorter than the rest, and he
passed under the first wire clothes line in
,he yard all right, and was going for the
penthouse on q jump, when his neck
caught ,he second wire clothes line just
~ the minister and two Of the deacons
caught their pecks under the other wire,
You know how a wire, hitting a man on
the throat, will set him back, head over
appetite. Well sir, ] was looking out the
back window, and ! wouldn't be positive,
but think they all turned double back
sonmersaults, and struck on their ears.
Anyway, pa did, and the gun must have
been cooked, or il struck the hammer on a
stone, for it went oil, and it was pointed
toward the house, and three Of the visit
ors got sailed. The minister was hit the
worst, one piece Of sal 1T taking him in the
hind leg, and the other in the back, aud
he yelled as though it was dynamite.
suppose when you shoot man with salt
il sn,arts, like when you get corned beef
brine OH your hands. They all yelled,
and pa seemed to haye been knocked silly,
some way, for he pranccd around and
seemed to think lie had killed them. He
sworc at the wire clothes line, and then
missed pa and heard splash like when
yeu throw cat in tile river, and then l
thought Of the cisteru, and | went down
and took pa by the collar and pulled him
sut. o, he was awful damp. No sir, it
WAS no duel at all, but an axident, and |