The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1883-12-01
"He built him a castle in spain," ,"


Josephus. under all his bluster aud folly,
possessed an eminentIy practical mind. AS
he lay tossing feverishly about his bed af
ter the long account Of bone life given by
his young cousin, be sent his mind uTon
a voyage of discovery through his past
career. He said to himself what Frasty
had said many a time "JOesphus, my boy,
you're an asst" OF course you're not en-
tirely responsible yourself for all the don
keysh mani festations Of the past, but it is
high time now If you mean to be anybody
that you should alter your course and (nix-
ing the metaphor) "sail in quite a different
track" What that track should be as yet
he knew not, but "barring the reef in his
figure head" his old tInbers were still
sound and, with careful navigation capable
Of "ploughing the raging main" oi liia's
tsmpiesuous sea.
Joe didnt make up his mind all at once
10 start out aud read Lither's theology and
Schillcr's poems or even to learn to play
upon the flute. There were insupernble
objections to such lines Of conduct The
young gentleman So anxious Tor relormG-
zion was nearly twenty years OF age, but
yet his education had not proceeded so far
ns to enable HIM TO make out any printed
matter moio complicated than that of the
second reading book or the "iour line plea"
advertisements in the local paper.
81 want TO know as much as William at
any rate," thought Joe, "and to do SO
must make clean sweep OF all sham and
humbug, aud begin ut the very beginning
aud learn to read the English language"
| He made up his nina, in addition, that as
| his lace had now nearly recovered its pris-
tine beauty he would go to work at on, Q
and begin 10 morrow. Having formed such
simple aud manly resolutions, Joe turn d
over on his side aud slept the sleep Of the
just. Thuse guardian angels who keen
| watch over the steps Of returning prodigals
| visited him in his tranquil dreams and all
| uight long he dwelt in a region of such
| visions as come at times to those who have
| been saved from shipwreck or from whose
lives some other terrible catastrophe has
been ayeIted. As he expressed il in the
morning "a magic lantern show was going
on in my inside all night" Pressed BY his
mother, who took a more than amused in
| terest in the idea OF her boy "Jobus" be.
coming sentimental or romantic, he des
crlbed some OF the scenes in the gorgeous
panorama he hdd witnessed:
81 first snw myself, ne said "at the bot.
tom Of a class OF young boys aud girls in
the little night school at Weissport Thu
teacher was very easy and kind to me.
When II came To my turn he told me to
read where a small boy had Just len oil. ]
stood up, shaking like a leaf and tried 10
make out with my thumb u couple of
words in which all the letters were badly |
mixed s'sndlng wrong end upward. The |
tirst ssntencv was one that had been read |
over three Or tour times by another fellow |
an | knew il oil by heart, but my head
wns swimming aud 1t wouldn't come right. |
II was this, What priceless boon are the |
days OF Junei' following i. with my thumb |
] could only siulter out Whats a prst- sel |
DO ne for a dog To he ehewiu'.' The BOYS |
aud girls howled and were standing up on |
the bench. The teacher serowled ald said,
Joe NOrdhof' you're making tool of me
and yourself. What are YOU thinkiD' |
abou2 was trying 10 think OF an excuse |
when the scene changed an | was stand. |
ing up before the black board with "a piece |
of chalk in my hand. | had Just finished |
working out vulgar fraction which cover
ell two roOds and half of the board. Oh. |
jimmlneyl twas a bully OF a yulparian. |
Twas crlss-er0ss AL the way down with |
pluses and minuses and inwerleal diyisors |
and proceeiins' by multiplication and So
on an was tsarin' away through them all |
@ terrier with a TIN can when the pugzler |
s'rmed busted and lsit bad at(havin' nn
more boiad To show the hgurin' wien the
teacher stopped aud said 'thatIl do Joe,
that's the answer-7O red he: rings am
halt lie what john will he, for his dav's
work on. the turnips. You NAV gn 10
your scat aud tell your father wbso Won
get home that you're the levelest headed
manufacturer OF nerrin' hIures that ever
attended THIS rcAdemv' was rushing of
to tell my id man when the chap waikin'
with .he lantern changed the scene again
and ten | saw myself with my hair di-
Vided IN tie middle, a stand-up collar, am
I silver pencil rase, sitting as large as life
ia the Mauah Chunk Court House. | was
hghtn claim 10 the undivided right Of
the Pennsylvania RaIlrnad. F. B. Nc.
Gaven Was the other fellows attorney but
ltosene C"nkling was Pulverizing hln for
me and Just as old Rescue was lwis ing his
surl belnre giving the court, jury sud
counsel General Jackson. the scene was
chang ged and the old man said 'Jnbus the cot.
fee is boilln' over If he hadn't walked me
just then few more scenes would have
landed me atthe Washington White House
or prrhsis IN the Kingdom nl Heaven"
We shall see anon what iuAuenee .ha
! viSon sKeTtsd rpon the r.a,liiy.
Ito Be CoAtmHsd.)
rALELaxD.