Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1883-10-05
having tired of France, vii come to Wash
irgton early in 1884 to see somethinsgs Of the
capital city. -
We and 2HuIflor..,

a Spanish proVerb runs: hen a
fly fails inf0sa glass Of iiiquor, a Spaniard
throws away the whole contents of the
glass, fly and all a Frenchman takes out
the fly and drinks the liQnor an English
swallows the, fly only, throwing away the
liquor" f5ss. 1.s ~ ss5 ss
An exchanges starts off a column with
the startling heading, .'An Embezzler
Wanted" We don't honestly believe
you've got a thing to embezzle, but if
you want good embezzler with 2:13
record, write to Newark, New Jersey.
There's where hey raise 'em. And we
believe they have several to cell. g..
"You have wide view from these
mountains" said an Engishmen to
shepherd in some remote district in the
heights of Aberdeen. "That's true"
said the shepherd. Can you see Amer
lea from here?" asked the traveller.
"Muckle farrer than that" he replied.
"When the mist drives of, ye can see
| the mune."
Brown mistakes his man: Come"
| said Brown, "you must give something
for our fair. Why, even stodkins came
down handsomely. didn't any
thing from him. He has 8 very bad
lame, you know, but charity eovereth
| multitude of sins. Come, now, what
| ball put you down for?' SWELL" re-
| piled Fogg, II guess l don't care to have
| my sins covered up; no hypocrite about
| me. Day-day, old boy"
"I'll have to fne you S." said po-
lice judge to man who had been ar
rested for drunkenness.
"Judge you ought not TO make me pay
So. Why you know me. I keep sum-
:ner resort hotel near here, and you
| stopped with me couple Of weeks at
the opening Of the season"
'Oh, yes, | remember you now. OF
course III not fine you So
| "Tbank you, sir"
| ''pll only fine you $l0."-Opie Reid.
A colored man living on Wilkins
street was ordered by the Sanitary po-
lice some time since to abate bad
smelling nuisance at his back door. The
| other day the officer who served the no.
! tice met the man on the street and
| asked:
"Well, what did you do?"
"Oh! bated dat smell dat VERY mex
day"
"Use chloride of lime?'
'No, sab, | went to de woods an got
some skunks cabbage to bile up on de
| stove an de water amt skeercelY cot
| hot befo' de- ole smell turned hand
spring an went cootin'!"-Detroit Free
| Press.
Perhaps the meanest ghost in all this
broad, fair land Of ours, is haunting an
old house in Peoria, Illinois. The spec
ire shufles around the room a little,
and occasionally bangs the china and
scratches at the doors, just enough to
keep the garrison on the alert; bat his
colossal Ineaness is apparent when he
ma es it his delight to go out doors and
excite the dogs into commissions of rage
by teasing them, and inducing them to
bite savage but futile bites st the i'm
palpable legs of their gho5tIy tormentor.
You wouldn't think a ghost could be 80
mean as that, now, wouldn't you?
There is a great difference between
the almshouses in the different states.
Now. for instance, III Philadelphia, the
superintendent only steals the roof off
the alrnshouse, and sells it; but in TeWks-
bury they take the skin off the pauper
and tan it. On the whole, as the skin
isn't taken { # until the pauper is dead,
the Tewksbury d ethod is preferable.
"Well, Fathe' Brown, how did you
like the sernc Il yesterday" asked
young preacher. "Ye see, parson," was
the reply, Il haven't Il fair chance at
them sermons Of yours. I'm an old man
now, and have 10 sit pretty we'll back by
the stove, and here's old Miss Szn;thie.
| Widder Taft, a Rvlaed's daughters. n
Nabb Brit. n all the rest sittin' ID troEt
of me with their mouths wide open
a.swallerln' Gown all the best of the SER
mon, m VIII it gets down to me is putty
poor stuff, arson. putty poor stuff