The Labor enquirer., 1883-01-06

ports of merriment, but somehow the
passengers did not- look joyful, but
gazed at each other sadly and with
apprehension.
t'Oh; you coy darling!". piped the thf'e'
the New Yorker in voice supposed
to mimic femininity. why have you
not written me2 Morn, noon and eve
have T longed for a word from thee.
gentle Joe.o HI
Eyes, an you gotleft, Orlando"
"When d. y'u cum down?n
"Last eve. Got on an awful bat
with the boys, and went to bed at
fourteen o'clock a. M; with a head the
size of a balloon iib on a nobleman''s
yacht. When ] fell out Of bed for
breakfast this morning what do you
s'pose I got?n E \ H.
4 "Got left.' >E9 Il. Nt#
"No, no, dear son; / got note from
gay deceiver, asking me to call an
take her an her mamma to the polo
grounds to see the foot ball match."
/ "D'you take her?" - t|+ .15r
"Bet cher sweet life I didn't. Sent g
note sayin' I'm no hog, I'll take you,
but I draw a line at the old woman, !"
"Nothing mean about you, if you
are beautiful" .'"@\' -.
,"Well, she must think I'm a bloom
in chump to lug the entire, domestic
establishment to the game. By, the
way Rosalind, get into this hat will
you?" -... ./
"Oh, you sassy, divil, it's English
an your mother is hungering fur
bread. However, yer bound to keep
up with the style, I see. Il
"Well, there's snow in bed when l
get left. It was quite chilly little
while ago, though. I was going down
Madison avenue when my eyes lighted
on coy and giddy dame-a perfect
fairy, by George. 1 said, I will have
recourse to willy plot, oh! Hal so l
crossed the street, forged ahead, came
back to the near side again and wan
dered casually back, so as to give her
an opportunity to view me in all nay
native grandeur and beauty"
ooh, you sweet thing?"
"Well, I gave her good chance to
get mashed on my shape, an then
raised my newly gotten tile and said,
pleasant EVENING" Well, sir, she just
raised her eyes slowly and gave me
the coldest cut you ever saw in your
life. Phew, it makes my head swim
to think Of it,"
"What did you say?" .
II did the brat act again and gently
murmured Good evening""
After this the New York young man
recounted several thrilling experiences
with beautiful girls who had been
madIy in love with him at various
times, in a voice distinctly audible
throughout the whole car. They were
evidently the sons of wealthy parents,
and had been given every advantage
but that of careful training. I should
imagine that the best thing to do with
them would be to give each one thor
ouhg spanking and put him to bed
until he has learned the English Ian
guage.-Brooklyn Eagle.
JOSH BILLINGS PHILOSOPHY.
Yu kant help an improvident person
only temporarily. They are like an
empty bag: they will stand up. if they
are held.
Talk with every man you meet, learn
sumthing from him, notiss every thing
you see; learning il in books, but wis
dunn il every WHARF.
The man who haz never be9n tempt
ed may be very strong, but he kant
prove it.
Yung man, if yu expekt to amount
to emmy thingin this life, yu hav got
to make yurself necessary. If yu run
into yure hole, and expekt to be dug
out: yu will find ten thousand people
who are reddy to stop up the mouth
ov the hole and smother yu, to one
who will undertake to dig yu out.
When it il impossible to decide be-
tween two opinions, do az the back.
woodsman duz when he il lost; makes
up hiz mind which il positively the
right way; and then takes the directly
opposite one.