The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-04-24
AKISSER FROM KISSVILLE
The Venerable Commander in
Chief and the Pretty
Actress.
San Francisco Post.

The return of Miss Alice Harrison to
when a memoer of the famous Californis
company of 1, ur or Eve years ago, which
NAV still provoke a smile from those who
witnessed the occurrence In question. About
the time OF Miss HIS farewell benefit at
that theatre Gen. Sherman was visiting the
city, and, with his staff, occupied a box at
said performance. Now, whatever differ
ence of opinion NAV exist as to the militia
~ renown of The general Of our armies,
there is no dispute as 10 his being the
champion kisser of the continent In fact,
the hero of Atlanta may be said 10 posses
a mania for labial salutations Of fatherly
sort, and is known 10 frequently indulge
in the proud boast that he has kissed SO
per cent. of all the pretty girls of the
United States His chief of staff once COM
pu,ed the generals kissing monthly aver
age, taken BY and large all the year round,
dry and vet seasons included. at about
1906, or say, in round numbers. about o.
600 kisses per each kissing fiscal year If
the general had only added babies 10 the
list OF his subjects, he would have kissed
himself into the White house years ago !:
but his reluctance to waste valuable time
and raw material in the pursuit of his
hobby, induces him, with the true instincts
of veteran professor of OSCILLATION, to Sc
lect only the prettiest of the SIX for that
honor.
At the benefit referred to, no sooner did
Miss Harrison appear ON the stage than
the old war-horse suuffed the battle from
afar and began TO grow restless and uneasy
No. so<Y i'll
their chief suggested the propriety of going
behind the scenes to compliment the
beneficiary.
We must DOW ask our readers
10 accompany us to the little
Danish settlement Of Eericvland on
the borders of the BAtic, in the year,
1881. A village festival is being held, and
as usual the distinguished visitors gather
ed to show the girl who has taken the an
pual prize for cooking and virtue. There
was q young American officer amid the
number, who instead of paying the custo-
mary salute upon the cheek of the village
celebrity, took her in his sky-blue arms
and settled down on her frontispiece like .
hydraulic pump on an assessment list.
The minutes fiy by. and just as the spects.
tors are about drawing their stop watches
on the last quarter the young officer comes
to the surface again. As he RECEIVERS his
exhausted wind the weather beaten cap
tain of wrecking crew approaches and
says:
"Young man, I'll give you your own
price to ship with me as diver.
"And why~
Because you can hold your breath long
er than any man in the business"
We merely relate this little incident to
emphasize our story. The kisser was young
Tecumseh. But to resume. As soon as
the staff were behind the scenes Gen. Sher-
man pitched in with the remark that he
hadn't kissed anything since breakfast He
was standing in the middle of the stage,
with his back To the curtain, and absorbed
in bestowing paternal kiss upon Alice,
and feeling like a just admitted angel,
sliding down q buttered rainbow, when the
impish young lady saw that the prompter
was about 70 ring up the drop. Quickly
placing her hands over the generals eafs
50 he could not hear the bell, she backed
him against the curtain. As every one
knows thii 10 wound around huge wood
en- roller on the inside of the canvas. The
generals coat-tails were caught BY this a
the curtain went up. and before the prompt
q could rsvefse the motion, the ssteund-