Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Anacortes, Wash. Ter.) 1882-1887, 1883-06-30
WIT AND HUM0R.

NdulJ1np dlnDltlOu- L uc ueolS II VI
the bank burglar
Many patients at our best hospitals
receive Cruel treatment.
Might not the Kelley motor be
termed stationary engine.
The dregs of the w(h)ine-The
last of the dog show.
Breaches of promise-Those your
tailor didn't bring home.
A question of voracity--How much
can you eat?
The musician, like the cook, makes
his bread out of his do.
Type-setter's song-'We never
speak as we pass 'pi.'
A spring idyl--A May loafer.
Grains of wheat are strawberries
Why are bores like treesa Because
we love them best when they leave.
What did the paper weight for!--
New South. Probably for its ink
come
When a school girl becomes toned
down isn't she an ex pert?
''Sun, moon and stars forgot"
quoted a senior, as he fiunked in as
tronomy.
The wig is the missing link. 1t is
neither man nor monkey, but bare
boon.
A bee often meets with reverses,
but as a rule he is successful in the
end.
On Memorial Day the captain of
the ship of state should deliver
deck oration.
If you will let the children play
with the chessmen, you must not
complain if they turn out to be pawn
brokers.
A man in Rochester has such a
cracked voice that he rarely says any
thing without breaking his word.
What might be considered an APP
propriate response to the oculist who
calls his attendant?-Aye, aye, sir!
A California man choked himself
to death with tape measure. The
Coroner's verdict was that he died by
inches.
A new paper in New York is called
the Lamb The proprietors will
probably have hard work to keep the
wolf from the door.
The oldest song in existence is said
to be, 1--WE won't go home till morn
ing" 1t evidently belongs to very
early times.
Many people who changed Their
places of residence on the LIST of the
month have already discovered that
they May day mistake.
The Grecian authorities now ex-
ciude American pork. Greece with
out pork must be almost as bad as
pork without grease.
People who think themselves smart
go about asking questions like this:
"Can rope walk?' We say yes
when it is taut.
A genius advertised-"A sewing
machine for twenty-five cents in
stamps" and his dupes did not see
the point until they received cam,
brio needle.
The Conundrum Clubs latest
"Why is death like the tag attached
to dog at the canine show in this
city?-Because they are both bound
to cur
Now that Arthur Sullivan il
knighted, we shall expect no more
musical works from him, for the good
book tells us that when the knight
cometh, no man can work.
A young lady being told at recent
fire to stand back or else the hose
would be turned on her, replied
"Oh, don't care; thoy are striped or
both sides, anyway"
A good deal of comment has beer
bestowed upon Red Cloud and bis
gold mine. If the darkest cloud may
have silver lining, why shouldn't ;
Red Cloud have gold one?
"Woman's Dominion" seems t.
worry some controversialist greatly
The thing seems simple enough. A
woman's dough minion is evidently
the new cook on baking day.
Brigham Young's grave is utterl,
neglected, and his widows never visi
it. They went there once to cry Owe
his remains, but it made the GROUND
so sloppy that they all caught cold
"My Watch Below is the singular
title of the last novel The writer
timepiece had probably, by reason o
a hole in his pocket, found its way t.
his boot via his pants leg.
81 was so mad at George las
night" said a girl of her sweetheart
EYES," said her i'll natured brother, 9
noticed when looked in the parlo
that you were up in arms"
Grayling is the name of fish
Fish is the name of the Grayling'
owner, and Fisher is the name OF he
skipper, who had just finished hi
fsh when the Grayling went down t.
the fishes.
An Irishman, seeing dud
emerge from Delmonico's the othe
night, exclaimed: "Oi say, come dow
out Of that-will yez, from unde
th'hat, Maybe ye think OF can't SCI
the legs of yez danglin' down."
.sThere is some talk of raising tn
standard of American colleges" say
an exchange. Let it be blood.
handkerchief with bat and fol