davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17
IN THE CATACoMBs.
nv -. u. BALLARD,

Never lived Yankee yet,
But was ready 10 bet
On the L. :. A.
II you speak Of l,aiy's sunny cline,
"Maine kin beat Il. every time :"
Tf you tell 81 .Eina's fount of Ere,
You rouse his ire,
In an injured way
He'll probably say,
81 don't think much of n smokin' hill.
We've got a moderate litto rili
Kin make yer old volcancr still
Pour old imagery down the crater,
N guess twill cool her fiery natter
You have doubtless heard of those ancicn; lies.
Manufactured for prize:
The reputation of each rose higher.
As he proved himself the bigger liar.
Said an Englishman-"0nly t'other day.
Sailing from Dover 60 Calais,
I saw n man without iloat of oar,
Swimming across from the English shore.
Manfully brcas,ing the angry sea"
"fricnd," said the lankee, 'ihaf ras me -
Mindful Of all these ,hrcc.to tales,
Whenever q laakee TO Europe sails,
The boys try every sort of plan
To rouse his asionishment, II they can.
sam Brown was a fellow from way down East,
Who never was staggered in the least.
No talo Of marvellous beast or bird.
Could match the stories be had heard.
No curious place or wondrous view
"was ckil 20 polunk. tell yu.'
They showed him room where queen had slept
'Twan't "np TO the tavern daddy kept"
They showed him Lueernc. But he had drunk
From the beautiful Northumberland.
They took him at last 90 ancient Rome,
And invcigled him into n ca,acomb.
Here they piled him with draugh,s Of wine,
Though he vowed old cider was twice as fine,
Till the fumes of Faicrnian filled his head,
And he slept as sound as the silent dead.
They removed a mummy 10 make him room.
And laid him at length in the rocky tomb.
They piled old skeletons round the stone.
Set 'dip" in u candicsiick of bone,
And left him 10 slunber there alone,
Then watched from distance the taper's CLEAN.
Waiting to jcer at his frightened scream.
When he should awake from his drunken dream
After n time the Yankee woke,
But instantly saw through the iiimsy joke;
so never u cry or shout he uttered,
hut soiemnly rose and slowly muttercd;
81 see how Il Is. It's the judgement day.
We've all been dead and slowed away;
All these stone furreners sleepin' yet,
An lin the fust one up, You bet!
Can't none o you Romans start. ] wondcr'
raiisi States 10 ahead, Jy iiHHdsr!'
--Gond Chssr.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17
hands, with his whole face wreathed in
prodigious smiles.

ITOuibiOus SthiiSS'
$50 you supposed il was | who was
to get married, eh ?" said he. "Not a
bit of it-not a bit OF it. am too
old bird to be caught with such chaff
as that. No, no, little Faith. Did
you think was going to turn my wee
bird out OF her nest after all the years
she has been cherished there? No, |
only wanted to assure myself that your
fancy was a real fancy, and that this
young-young rascal here" shifting
Bourne on the shoulder once more,
"loved you for yourself alone, and not
for the money he thought the old man
was going to leave you. And you are
to live here, both OF you, and we'll be
happy ever after. Strike up your harps
and fiddles. Let's have a dancc-let'S
all be merry together"
Uncle Nahum Nixon himself led Off
the bridal quadrille, dancing in the
good old style of fifty years ago. 81
don't have wedding every day." said
Uncle Nahum, brea,hlessly, as he cut
one last pigeon wing. "and ! mean to
make the most OF il.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17
GRANTS MARROW ESCAPE.

Bo'foH Trareicr.
General Grant, in recent convcrsa-
ton, said: "l'he darkest day of my life
was the day heard of Lincoln's assas-
sina,ion. Ibid no, know what itmeant.
Here was the rebellion put down in the
field, and starting up again in the gut
tcrs; we had fought it rs war, now We
had to fight it As assassination. Lin
coin was killed on the evening of the
I4th of April. was busy sending out
orders to stop recruiting, the purchase
Of supplies, and to muster out the army.
Lincoln had promised to go TO the the
ater, and wanted me to go with him.
While was with the President 4 note
came frow Mrs. Grant, saying that she
must leave Washington that night
She wanted to 60 to Burlington to see
her children. Some incident OF 4 tri-
fling nature had made her resolve to
leave that evening. | was glad to have
it so, rs did not want TO go to the
theatre. So made my excuses to Lin.
coin, and at the proper hour we started
for the train. As we were driving along
Pennsylvania avenue horseman drove
pas, us on gallop, and back again
around our carriage, looking into it
Mrs. Grant said: There is the man who
sat near us at lunch to day, with some
other men, and tried to overhear our
conversation. He was so rude that We
left the dining-room. Here he is now
riding after us. thought il was only
curiosity, but | learned afterward that
the horseman was Booth. II seemed
that | was to have been attacked. and
Mrs. Grants sudden resolve to leave
changed the plan. A few days after
received an anonymous letter from :
man saying that he had been detailed
to kill me, that he rode on my train as
far as IIavrc-de- Grace, and rs my cal
was locked he failed to get in. He
thanked God that he had failed. ! re
membered that the conductor had lock
ed our car, but how true the letter wa
l canno, say. learned Of the assassi
nation as was passing through Phila
dclphia. turned around, took spe
cial train and came on to Washington
II was the gloomiest day Of my life.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17

p1-A young lovers good by: Brook
lyn Young man comes to bid his sweet
heart good by. "well, Lizzie. I'm of
for Cincinnati tonight. Lizzie, whose
countenance is expressive Of the utmost
alarm-"Off for Cincinnati Why,
gracious heavens, Charley, thought
you told me you couldn't swim.
BrookiyR Eagle.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17

s@r rBasely libeled: "Rcach me down
that Webster, Pat" said one Of oui
lately elected Judges to his clerk. Zone
Of thin thaiving newspapers has been
libelling me and, be jabers, ! won'i
stand il. The thaving blackguard call:
me a forensic light. San FyaHeise'
Nesos Letter.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17

pa-No aid wanted: Awoman recent
" applied for State aid and the blank
was produced and the usual questions
asked. She answered them freely until
il came to "Your agei" "Have lgot to
tell that ?" she asked. "The blank
requires il, ma'am," was the reply
"Well, then," she said, 81 don't want
any State aid" AMI she aounced out Of
the Office in high dudgeon. ."-Bosfos
Tjdssfsipg.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17
ESTABLISHED 1850.
DIR. ]. O. MOYSTON'S
DENTAL PLACE,
Iss w. rayette street,

Near Paea Street, BALTIMORE, ND.
Full Sets Teeth from e. 10 $40.
Old. loose and broken sets repaired from 81 10 S.
Pure gold niiingsvrom si.So 20 IS.
Silver hilings from 81 TO g..
Teeth extracted ABSOLUTELY without pain by the
use Of nitrous oxide gas.
All work guaranteed. Those In need Of hrst-
class dentistry, at moderate rates, will do we'll TO
call 0fhee hours-sA ". TO 6P. NJ. tMch.ily.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17

Are making their elegant paris anishedl Cabinet
Photographs at - per dos.; Card Slse - per des.
TIE style and anish of our work la unexseiied.--
Portraits, Crayens, Porcelainp, Miniatures and
every description Of copying done at reasonable
rates. OelTSn1
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17

pa-Better left unsaid: "Do take an
other plate of these strawberries" said
Mrs. Parvenu at her luncheon party
the other day; "they won't keep, al
though we paid three dollars box for
'em. n-Nev York lkaiiasd Exfyess.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-03-17

p0-A queer Joke for Grandfather
Punch: Miss Nethcrblew-"Will you
advise me as to printing and publish
ing, Mr.. Sterrcogh? | have a little
work ready for the press, but have had
no experience" Gallant publisher
"My dear madam, printing and publish
ing are very different things. For
instance, if print kiss on your rosy
cheek it is not at all necessary to publish
it," Miss Nctherblew --"Siri" Tab
leau l-L0Rd6a Punch.
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
SOUTH WASHINGTON.

About 10 o'clock last night, white man,
occupying apartments above Mrs. Goldstein's
store, corner OF Eour-and.a-half and q streets,
became greatly frightened and rushed TO the
First Precinct Station, declaring that several
burglars were in his rooms, and asked for n
police officer to come to his assistance.
Roundsman Kennsr was dispatched to the
house, but no burglar could be seen, and it
soon became apparent that the Individual was
suffering from the effects OF strong potations
and had been frightened by the assaults OF
the northwest wind upon the wtndow.shutters.
TheTabernacle choir was at the church last
night practicing for Easter Sunday music.
There arc many excellent voices inthe choir,
and, doubtless, all who attend on Sunday Will
be treated to a rare musical feast. st. Domt-
MICS was crowded last night from 80 to $50
o'clock, and chorus OF eight male voices
sang tho tenebr@ in peculiarly effecting style.
Father Rochefort preached an interesting ser
mon on the crucihxion Of Christ. st Dominic's
has been beautifully decorated, and 1t is ex-
pected that 1t Will be attended by immense
audiences on Sunday.
The fish vessels from the lower Potomac
still continue to land at johnson & Co.'s wharf.
The captains seem determined to test the
legality OF the provision compelling them 10
land at any particular wharf Judge Smell has
deferred Judgment in the matter, and It will
probably be some time before the question Is
finally settled.
The sunday-school at Ryland Chapel will
occupy the church at IL o'clock on Sunday and
give an interesting programme OF singing and
recitations.
Two new dredge boats arrived at tho wharves
this morning for Ross K Sanford.
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
EAST WASHINGTON.

Tho funeral OF the late william Slater, esd,
took place yesterday afternoon Mt the Church
of Reformation, Dr. Parsons, pastor, nnl was
conducted by Rev. DR.. Hoover, OF Hancock,
Pa. Dr. Hoover, who IL a very old gentleman,
admitted Mr.. slater into the Lutheran Church,
near Lovettsvllle, Loudoun County, Va, nfty
years ngo. Deceased was an old and greatly
respected citizen OF this city, and died nj his
residence, No. 40 New Jersey avenue south
east on Wednesday last of pneumonia, at
The advanced age OF so years. Mr.. Slater was
native OF Loudoun County, Va, but he had
resided In this city for thirty i've years. He
was beloved by oil who knew him, and his
bered.
The United States steamer speedwell left
TIE navy.yard this forenoon for the Norfolk
Maynard with u cargo OF freight and sup
plies. Captain McRitchie commands the
Speedwell, and she ia running as a freight
boat in place OF the Tallap osa.
Tomorrow viii close tho Lenten season, and
tho festivities OF Easter Monday viii be pre-
faced by solemn and interesting services at
tho Protestant and Catholic churches in
East washington.
tits expected that tho new Chief Of Police
Will visit the Eighth Precinct Station House
some time this afternoon.
A Apolyopticon exhibition will be given next
Thursday evening at tho Tenth.street NJ. E..
streets southeast, for the benefit OF the Sab
bath school. The object is worthy one, and
the exhibition will be we'll patronized.
The Metropolitan Presbyterian sunday
school, corner of Fourth and streets south
east, will hold their monthly missionary
meeting to morrow, at o'clock p. m. MRS.
Kirkwood, of the Women's Board OF Foreign
Missions, will address the meeting. Other In
teresting exercises may be expected. All are
cordially invited to be present.
East Washington business Notes.
The Swiss Dairy, Mrs. Wagner, dO3 East
Capitol street, continues TO sell the purest and
freshest milk, cream and butter at low rates.
Kensington needlework taught, embroidered
articles and material In abundance and va
riety at Miss Z. +. Babson's, 203 Pennsylvania
aypDup
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
ALEXANDRIA AFFAIRS.

The services in the Catholic and Episcopal
churches tomorrow will be of an unusually
interesting character.
Services in Roberts Chapel IN. L. Church)
tomorrow Will be held as follows: Sermon al
J. q. m. by the pastor, Rev. P. G. Walker, and
at 80 7. M, by Rev. p. Mcpherson; Sunday
schoolat o q. IN.
The regular drill Of the A. L. =, last night,
was largely attended, and two more recruits
were added TO the ranks.
Tho taking of the depositions In the Massey
Wise contested election case is still In progress
at the old courthouse. J. L. Adams, Edwin
Fry and Thomas Williams were examined
yesterday, but no particular points of interest
Two boats loaded with oysters arrived at the
wharves in this city yesterday, and the bi-
valves can now be purchased for the nominal
sum OF 60 cents per bushel.
= The festival to be given by the ladies OF st.
Mnry's Church, at st. Mary's Hall, corner
OF Pitt and Wolfe streets, will be opened on
Monday evening next.
The March term u the County Court Will
begin on Monday.
Rev. o. f. Flippo, Of this city, will deliver a
lecture in the NJ. Z. Church South, at Fairfax
Courthouse, on Monday next,
Work has been commenced on another loco
motive 10 be built at the shops OF the Virginia
Midland Railway in this city. There is also
being built at the shops ahandsome passenger
coach. The company nnd 1t cheaper 70 con.
struct their own rolling stock than to buy Of
Northern dealers, which is greatly benehtlng
this community.
Annie Carter, a colored girl, and a colored
man, named Washington Bird, were arrested
last night for passing counterfeit money. The
notes which were passed and those attempted
TO be disposed OF by the parties named were
good imitation OF legal notes. Other parties
are supposed to be concerned in the affair,and
warrants have been issued for their arrest.
Some unknown party carried on a calf from
the farm of tho late Richard Lloyd's estate,
near this city, last night.
James James was arrested yesterday even-
ing for violation OF the police regulations at
the lOcnl dopOt.
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
WEST WASHINGTON.

The following are the grain quotations on
Change this morning: Wheat, SLY to $l.20
for Fultz; 81 20 to S1.22 for mixed; Sl.22 TO
La for Lancaster. Corn, 60 % 60L, cents
for Yesson; go to COZ cents for white, with
liberal receipts Of both.
The schooner Virginia Dare, Captain Della.
uey, arrived at the whRrves this morning, and
will be loaded with coal by tho New Central
Coal Company for Petersburg, Va.
The Columbias have engaged the services OF
Ellis Ward, who Will coach for them this sea-
son.
Mr.. John Il. Brady has completed plans for
remodellng the old Georgetown Hall into an
engine-house for No. D Company.
The causeway between Analostan Island and
the main land, which was destroyed by tho
freshet OF 1877, has never been repaired, ana
is now In q fearfully bad condition.
Mr.. @. A. Ofrutt, manager Of the Baltimore
& Ohio telegraph oflce In West Washington,
is confined to his residence with sickness.
Mrs. Dr.. p. G. Trunnell, Of Louisville, KY.,
ACCOMPANIED by her two little sons, is on n
visit to'her aunt, Mrs. E. A. Trunnell, at 1920
Frederick street.
Arope has been stretched across the Poto-
mas near the Aqueduct Bridge, and to-day a
diver was employed in searching for the re-
mains OF Herbert Collins.
The publication in yesterdays CRITIC that
The body OF young Collins had been found was
based upon a telephone message which came
IN at $50 p, m.-an hour so late as TO preclude
ycrlncatiOn. our informant had cOnfounded
the finding of the body OF Frank Drew with
that OF Colllns.-ED. CRITIC
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
PERSONAL.

THOMAS DAVIS. of Pittsburg, ex-col-
lector Of internal revenue, is at Willards.
Mr.. JOHN 7. Moss, of Western Penn
sylvania, the oldest practical distiller in tho
United States and one of the most successful,
is at Willards.
SENATOR HARRISON and eX-Repre-
sentative Pierce QndD arrived In the city
yesterday morning from New York, and last
night started homeward.
Mr.. ORMOND II. BUTLER, business
manager OF Collier & Rice's Iolanthe opera
Company, is in the city. The company Will ap-
pear at Ford's Opera-House on Monday next.
REV. Z. Fl. VAUGHN, presiding elder
OF the Roanoke district OF the Virginia Con.
ference, has discovered large quantity OF ore
on his land in Giles County, Va, which Is
shown by an assay OF the metal to be silver
and lead.
HON. GEORGE G. HAzLEToN, NJ. c.,
from Wisconsin, is confined TO his rooms, at
S17 Twelfth street northwest, from q severe
bruise received on his right kneecap, or
patella, while in New York recently, which
Will prevent his leaving the city for some
weeks.
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
DIED.

HILL.-on the 22d instant, Anthony Hill,
In the 17th year Of his age.
His funeral will take place from his late
residence, 227 Twenty.nfth street northwest,
Sunday, at 2 o'clock p. m. Friends and rela-
tlves respectfully invited.
RABY.-on Friday afternoon, March %,
1883, Alyerda, youngest daughter OF st.
George II. and Almira NJ. Raby, age s years
months and 90 days.
HULBERT.-Friday morning, March %,
1883, at his residence In Virginia, Thomas J.
Hubert, formerly OF Detroit, Mich, In the SD
year OF his age.
HuME.-At 10:30 p. M, Thursday, March
%, 1883, Virginia Rawlins, relict OF Charles
Hume, aged GA years.
Funeral from Trinity Church, corner of
Third and streets northwest, on Sunday, the
Goth instant, at 80 p. IN.
coLE.-on March 10. 1888, at Idaho
springs, Cola James Il. Cole
coLLINs.-on the 23d of March, 1888, at
10 q. M, after lingering Illness, George W.
Collins, son OF the late j. II. Collins.
DUDLEY.-on Thursday, March %, 1888, at
3;2l a. NJ, Henry Dudley, in the 55th year Of
his age.
Funeral will take place from Brooks
Church, Vermont avenue, at l o'clock Sunday
morning.
MANNING.-At . o'clock p. M. Wednesday
ming, aged 80 years.
oEEIL.-In Georgetown. on March 81
1888, Michael O'Neil, native OF County Cork
Ireland, and resident OF Georgetown, d. O.
W Nhp Hoot thiAAy sNuisi IA tiAo optL ySeti VI
his age.
The friends of the family are respectfully
invited 10 attend his funeral from his late
residence, No. 1887 Thirty seventh (Warren)
street, on Sunday, March 20, al 80 o'clock.
RowE,-on March %, 1855, OF pneumonia,
John Leonard, tho beloved and only
con OF William n. and Susie @. Rowe, aged ,
years and months.
sHANAHAN.-Depa this life, after a
long and painful illness, which he bore with
Christian fortltude, ON March %, 1883, at .
O'Clock, a. M, John shanahan, aged 30 years
and ii months.
Funeral will take place on Sunday afternoon,
March 20, at O'Clock, from his mothers
residence, II Jacksons alloy. Friends and
relatives are respectfully invited TO attend.
wHITE.-on March %, 1888. at s o'clock a.
M, Thomas White, aged 60 years, a native OF
County Kerry, ireland.
Funeral will take place from his late resi-.
dence, on Seventh street road. above Grant
avenue, northwest, Sunday next. the 25th, at
O'Clock p. m. Friends and relatives OF the
family are respectfully invited 10 attend.
Il HoFFMAN.-on the 23d instant, Anna
Catharine, wife OF George ]. Hoffman, In the
d2d year OF her age.
Funeral will take place from 7l2 Ninth
street southeast, at Q O'clock Sunday.
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
THE COURTS.

CIRCUIT CouRT-Justice MacArthur.-Gll-
more vs, Miller; judgment confessed. Hoge
vs. Murray ot al; judgment by default. Greg
vs., Gutman; Judgment on motion. Jaffray VS..
Gutman; same action. Levy ct al. vs.. Dam
mann; same action. Sleevers VS.. Siloerberg;
Boyle; judgment confessed Payne vs. Geiserj
new trial denied.
PROBATE CoURT-Justice Hagner.-Wlll OF
Lewis b. Wynne exhibited, proven and letters
testamentaiy Issued to Lewis d. Wynhe, on
boud OF S1 600. Estate OF Mary E. Carey hrst
account OF executor passed. Estate OF Patrick
Il. Cooney; order appointing John ID, Cooney
v. Coopey, guardian TO the orphan chileren,
on bond of 500. Estate OF Isaac NJ. Sinner;
order appointing Peter p. Little guardian Of
the orphan children on bond OF $500. VIII OF
MARY L, AIagruder exhibited and fully proven.
Estate ofNIary Duvall; order OF publication,
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24

memorial, presented him with the BALL and all
set 10 work right merrily. But rs too often foil
out In this game, great strife did arise among
the younge person OF the same clttie;" and
hence. in tho timeIoi Henry VIII this piece OF
homage to the mayor was converted into
present OF elk gleaves or handdarts OF silver
TO be given
For the Rest Foot-Race,
whilst the saddlers who went In procession
on horseback, each carrying spear with q
wooden ball decorated with flowers and arms,
exchanged their offering for silver ball 70 be
a "rewnrd for that horse which with speedy
runniDge should run before all hers.'
These silver bells were In tho seventeenth
century converted Into cups, or other pieces
OF plate, which still continue 10 be trophies of
victory at horse races.
But the ordinary prize at games OF ball
during Easter was
The Tansy Cake.
These cakes were made of -four, butter,
sugar, sherry, cream and tansies, tho tansy
having reference, eays Selden, to the bitter
at the same time "'twas always tho fashion
Tor man to have n CANNON OF bacon TO show
himself TO be no jew" The Jews themselves,
however, says Brady in his ClariS Cdlenddrtd,
"long since contrivod TO diminish the bitter
flavor OF the tansy by making II into pickle
for their Paschal Lamb, from whence we bor-
general sauce for that description OF food"
Pasche Eggs.
Another custom which prevailed in the olden
time, and which ia still kept up both In Eng.
land and this country, Is that or making pres
cnts of eggs stained and ornamented with de-
vices and notices. They are termed "Pasche'
eggs. This observance seems TO have arisen
from belief that eggs were an emblem of the
resurrection. In tho ritual OF Pope Paul v,
which was composed for the use OF the British
Isles, there is this prayer for the conservation
OF eggs:
"Bless, O Lord, we beseech Thee, this Thy
creature OF eggs, that II may become q whole.
somo sustenance TO Thy faithful servants,
eating II In thankfulness to Thee on account
Of the resurrection of our Lord"
The origin OF this custom OF collecting
Pasche eggs may have been the resumption
on the part of our forefathers OF eggs and of
animal food at Easter on the termination OF
Lent. II seems, however, that at this season
extreme caution was to be used In partaking
of food OF all kinds, ana nothing was 10 be
eaten which had not been previously blessed,
or had not at least the sign OF the cross made
over 1t, for the faithful were thought Just
then to be particularly subject to the attacks
Of evil spirits.
Durandus gives lamentable instance of the
fatal consequences arising from q neglect OF
this precaution: 1.-TWO devils got possession
Of young girl and tormented her for three
years." miracle which, says Mr.. Soane, "is
often renewed in our own days, but with this
especial difference, that when the devil now
possesses woman, he does not torment herself
but others. However, on this occasion, q Gun.
ming exorcist drove the fends out ut last, hav.
| ing previously made them confess that they
had been lying perdu in a melon, which the
| girl had incautiously eaten without flrsi
making tho sign OF the cross"
The Evening critic., 1883-03-24
MARRIED,

ABBoTT-oTIS.-On the evening OF the Goth
OF March, 1888, at the Ryland Methodist Epis-
copal parsonage, by Rev. William B. Evans, A.
NJ. George a. Abbott of Fairfax County, Va,
to Harriet L. otis, OF the same county and
State. No cards.
PowERS-POwERS.- .-On the 22d instant, in
the Thirteenth street Presbyterian Church,
D., caroline 4, daughter of A. Il. Powers, OF
Chicago, to Fred. Perry Powers, OF Washing
ton. ID. O.