Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1883-10-20
A Parents Sensible Advice.


\ queer case has just come 10 light in
Chicago. \ young man spent IN evening
with his girl, aud during the evening,
while the family was present in the par
lor, he was us demure aud bland and chill
like as could be wished. The mother came
into the room after the family had retired
10 get 4 handkerchief she had left, and tho
Young man was seated in chair In the
middle of the room, while the girl was
seated on 4 sofa, and nothing that the
mother could see in the actions ofeither. led
her to think they were more than passing
acquaintanceS. IL seemed 10 her rs though
the young couple had met before, but
there was no evidence that they were very
well acquainted. All night, after lie had
gone, the girl complained of pain In her
side, and in the morning doctor waa
called, and he found that two of the girls
ribs were broken. How il was done no.
body knew. The girl could not tel! for
the life of her, though she blushcd when
asked about il, aud the mother looked very
wise rs she looked ut the doctor. The doc
tor made some Inquiries, set the ribs aud
went away, and the girl proceeded 10 re-
cover. .... ....
That evening the young man called ana
was astouished when informed OF the en-
tent OF the girls injuries, and Wondered
how it could have happened, though the
mother watched his face close rs hc spoke
and detected not only blush, but pro-
fuse pcrSpiration on his face. She had
been a girl once herself, and though she
had never had any ribs broken she had
been huggcl some. IL was trying posi-
ton for all of them. The father WAS away
on Il trip 10 Wisconsin, and when he came
home the matter had 10 be explained 10
him. lie was told that the ribs just sim-
ply broke themselves, anu th;t neither
the mother nor the girl nor the young
man could account for il, and yctall three
of thcEl blushcd terribly. The father pat
ted his girl on the head, told her she would
be better when she got over il, aud then
called the young man into the. library.
'rhc young man was so weak lac conid
hardly walk, and when he sat down lac
took out handkerchief and moppcd his
brow and wished he MAS dead. The father
looked the young man over and was sorry.
lie finally said:
"Young man, guess | can give YOU
some points on hugging. You mn't hrSt
learn that 4 girl IS not constructed on the
same principle OF an iron fence or truss
bridge. a girl is 4 delicate piece OF mech
anisu, like fine watch, full oi little
springs, wheels, jewels, &c. The break
Ino of any one of these would cause her to
cease keeping time and necessitite her De-
inc taken to 4 jcwecr for rcpalrs. In hug
ging Il girl you don't want to go at t"s u
YOU were raliinS aud binding, or catching
sturgeon. | know that where the family
sits up late with young couple anu spo'lS
several precious hours Of hugSing, that
unless the young man has good hca"
when left alone with the object of his al
lection, that he Is liable To Ovcrdo the mat
ter and try to make up for lost time. lie
seems to want to hug up lot ahead and
grabs the girl us though he wanted to
break her in two. This Il wrong. You
should go at it calmly aud deliberately,
even praycrfully, and be as gentle NJ
though she was an ivory fan. The gentle
pressure of the hand that 4 agirl loves,
even the touch Is as dear to her rs though
YOU run her through stone crushcr. You
should not grab her "a you would bag ot
oats, and leave marks OF her that VIII last
a lifetime. a loving woman should not
be made to feel that her life Is In danger
unless she wears corset made OF boiler
iron. hope this will be lesson 10 you,
and hereafter, ii you cannot control your
feelings, will provide woo'lcn Indian
for you TO practice on at first, until you
have developed your muscle and got tired,
and then we can turn our daughter loose
In room with you anu not feel that n Is
necessary 10 keep a surgeon handy. la
allowi ns you TO keep company with my
daughter / do not ngrcc 20 provide you
with human gymnasium, dressed IN =
Mother Hubbard wrapper AMI wearing
bangs. You can readily scc that girl
would not last a season through II shc had
to have ribs set once week. Please think
this thing over, and If the girl Is well
enough next Sunday you can drop IN aud
try some more ribs. Now you can go
home aud hug hat-rack for Nh hour or
two, aud have II repaired In the morning"
The young man went out into the night
air. took his ht Off TO cool his head and
hired man to kick him. ...i ..