The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-07-24
HERE'S LUCK.
And May Your Shadow Never
Grow Less.
AS You Peruse the Religious
Column.

got!
Shall We put any more wood in the
stove?
How did you manage to crawl
through last week, anyhow?
Wasn't it a scorcher?
Over two thousand beefsteaks died
in one hour, and were buried without
an inquest. Yes, you bet, they were
put under the /. ound quick.
Everybody knew what was the
matter with them. They were "pros-
trated by the heat.
In St. Louis the thermometers had
to be tied down with ropes, and one
broke its bonds and stood on his head
on the top of the court house dome
and reached for the sun.
Yes, Murcury went way upward,
then sat down on cloud and wagged
his feet around his head SO he could
fan himself with the wings hi,ched to
his heels.
You bet it was not. Why You
couldn'r stand on the ground and
reach up and hold your hand OF a
three-story TIN roof a minute. No
sir, not a minute. 1t was so hot
and high.
People who wouldn't speak to a
"workingman" two weeks ago, took
of their hats to Shafer every time
he passed by. Thew said he was nice
man; but ice men up-stuck their
noses, anu weighed out frozen due
drop for ten cents drop.
And that's how they made sun
while the hay shown.
Oh, you may say, ''give us rest"
and all that; but we'er doing this
preaching, and if you don't like the
way We talk, you'll find a contribution
box nailed on the front door, and you
can put your nickle i'll it as you pass
out.
tell you it was hot, and people
powerful thirsty. People should he
careful about their drinks in hot
weather. Take it by degrees and
watch the thermometer. When YOU
get up to SO stop-stop right there.
That's what thermometer is for-and
the man who wants more than IS
drinks is hog.
Talking about drinks
He held the old shirt by the neck
before discardipg it forever. but he
wasn't mourning for the garment. He
only said thusly: 81 wish l had the
money for all the drinks that have
gone through that old neck-band."
Stranger, its a long time since you
and l sung song together. The last
song we sang was an invitation to
Johnny to gil up the bowl, but he said
the bowl and the slate were both bro
ken. As we gazed upon the remains,
we gently murmured, "when shall We
three NEE: again. and departed.
The reason we havn't been here before,
though, was that we hare been to
Washington to examine Mrs. jerks.
We found Mrs. j., like her native
state, most all bayou.
But to our song. It's a late one.
Got in the house at 3 o'clock this
morning, through the back window.
The big bald-headed man Will now
murder the bass drum:
Gabriel sat on hickory tree,
Hoist up your attic window,
Shouting out that mercy free,
Sinners 60 along;
You grease your wings yOn flip on high,
Hoist up your attic window.
You turn a somerset in the sky,
Sinners 60 along.
0 Josiah, you'll expire
Kiss me on my aching brow,
Sinners 60 along.
Sister Ruth she went to church,
Hoist up your attic window,
The scriptures she was bound to search |
Sinners go along.
She found Dan locked in the lions den,
Hoist up your attic window,
She told it TO her brother Glen;
Sinners go along.
ACKNOWLEDGMENT was the king of the Jews, |
Hoist up your attic window,
He stood 'leven foot in his old gum shoes;
Sinners 60 along.
No roof ON the house the water comes in,
Hoist up your attic window,
He kept himself dry by drinking gin;
Sinners 60 along.
If there is anything we like to en-
courage, it is youth. We never yet
saw two boys tying tin can to a
dogs tail but what We felt thrill of
pity for the dog. All the innocence
of youth Youth is-if tina: cuss of a
bootblack didn't give me this lead
quarter, / don't want cent AS We
were saying, We like to encourage
youth. Here is one, seven years old
who ought to be encouraged /:
Dear uncle george please get me a
new ioundland dog. want puppy.
hope you are well tike am 90 to