Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1883-10-10
bright BITS.

Down in the mouth-bite a peach and
you'll get it.
ALFONSO does not know which to take
as the expression Of French sentiments
the GreVy of the government or the sauce
Of the mOb.-P0St.
"NEVER put of till tomorrow what y GU
can do to-day" didn'tapply to letter Writ
ing last SUNDAY, and the idea OF delay ING
was two-centsible TO be neglected.
CONE away frum that straw stack,
chile" called negro woman to her son.
..Fust thing yer Know yeTll hab de nay
fever. Doan yer l.ut none ob dat straw III
yer mouf" Irdceter.
..WHERE is the girl Of long ago:' sings
J0aqufn Miller. We saw her the other
dav. joaquin. But she isn't girl any
more She had gray hair, and wort ON
her nose, and no teeth, and wore specs.
A MINISTER who had passed around the
hat unsuccessfully at a country church,
said MY good people, hog cholera mas
broke out in this neighbOrhoOd ana ad-
wise YOU all to leave the country. Afkdi1-
SdS ITQreter.
\ ST. LOUIS girl stole nineteen trade
dollars and concealed them in her mouth,
and even then had jaw room enough leit 10
sass the officer who came to arrest her so
vigorously that his hair jumped up ana
Kicked his regulation cap of.
ALEGAL gentleman met a brother lawyer
one day last week, and the following con
versation took place: ''Well, Judge, how
is business?" Dull, dull; | am living on
faith and hope" Every good, but l have
got past YOU. for I'm living on charity.
Exchange.
Two lovers in Milwaukee agreed to COM
nit suicide at the same hour the other
night. Next morning both were up an
To-. or. hD
paher, and their disappointment and dis
gust at such conduct on the part OF the
other was too deep for utterance.
\ HUMORIST was once Called into the
Presence of the Managing Editor and
Solemnly Reproved for the Dizziness Of
his Wit. Your Jokes" quoth the Editor
''are so Bad that | am Daily Compelled
to print them in that NOndescript depart
ment entitled Pearls of Thought
4 SMALL man always has enough to
bear, but his dress becomes exceedingly
heavy when the despicable salesman at
the clothing store, just after the small
man has got into his new clothes, cries
ont to the accountant, so that everybody
else can hear, Boys suit. Mark gomez
L0uiScUic COHTicr-JOurNdl.
PAPA, can't l 20 to the store and get
me a new dress?' why, child, you
have got plenty of good dresses" Yes,
papa, but they are out of style" Non
sense, girl, the trees always come out in
the same style every spring, don't they:'
Yes, papa, and they always look green,
too ''All right, 30 to the store and get
a dress"
4 WULMANTIC factory girl wrote her
name and address and her desire TO be
married in nice little note, which she
placed inside the band OF the hat she had
just finished. Her father bought the hat.
On his way home that evening he paused
at a house which they were plastering
and obtained a slender and supple lath.
As the nOyclists say: I'VE Will draw
veil over the scene which ensued.'
HE'D been waltizing with his hosts ugly
elder daughter, and was i'm Il corner re-
pairing damages. Here he was espied by
his wOuld-be-papa-in-law ''She is the
Hover Of my family, sir said the latter
$50 il seems" answered the young man.
PITY she comes oil so. amt it, he con-
tinuCd, as he cssayed another vigorous
rub at the white spots on his coat sleeve.
THE wealthy and ariStocratic Mrs.
Jewel, who is stopping at summer
hotel, and who has been making some in
quirics of one of the walters in regard To
procuring the services of a laundrcss,
opens her door in answer to a loud and
! imperative knock just before dinner-time,
and discovers Mrs. MahOney on the TIRES
hold. Mrs. Mahoney: "Shure, an are
YOU the woman that was shpakin' to one
of the hotel iintlemin about @ittin' a lady
to wash for yoa -