davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12
A Horse Choked by a Snake.



Superintendent Lyon, Of the Barclay
Coal Mines, was in the city on Wednes-
day and told an 4dDerfiser reporter the
following snake story. the authenticity
Of which. he said, could be vouched for
by several reliable citizens; .sOn Tues
day last boy was engaged III ploughing
on the farm Of man named Wilkinson,
between Greenwood and Monroetop, in
Bradford county, when he saw an enor-
mons black snake lying stretched along
the ground near the fence. Frightened
by the reptile, the boy dropped the line
and started on a run for the house. Re.
inforced here by several members Of the
family he went back, when one OF the
horses was found lying ON the ground
with the python tightly coiled about his
neck. The snake was dispatched, when
II was found that the horse was dead,
his life having been chokcd out by tho
snake
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

alf urominent rhvsicisns ! "a an :.
cists for the stsnding al
saIicyljcn
s2~G
THE ONLY DISCOVER OF THE POISONOUS
URIC ACID WHICH EXISTS IN THE 8IOOD
or RHEUMATIC AND equity PATiEaTs.
sense ,em.y . ss :. d,ss, y on
case o. hheum.tm. 9out and Neuralgia, while
30 many so-cancn specincs ana supposed pAnaceas
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12
CHICAGO, Rock ISLAND PACIFIC R,y,


al
M he aciHc.
odtata Tha
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

Whalebone Howker arose in the Lime
Kiln Club in the interest OF harmony.
He had lately read no less than three
predictions Us to when the world was
coming to an end, and each one had q
date ii It's own. While all were made
IN the interest Of tine white folks, the ak
million colored people in this country
were more or less interested. They did
not propose to hang around here after
the world had come TO an end and all
The white folks had pegged out He
wanted the club to decide upon and set
an ofiiciaI date, or to call meeting Of
tho prophets and have them agree upon
rome particular date rcxt Fall, after the
melon season was oysf and everybody
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

PITrsBuRG, Aug. ll.--While five EN-
ployes Of Husscy. Horne 4 Co.'S steel
manufacturing establishment were TAX
ing stock in q warehouse at noon yester-
day frame supporting 500 tons of
steel gave away, burying Charles 0sh-
man and Robert Shemibe under the
ruins and slightly injuring the three
others. Oshman was instantly killed
and Shemibe will die.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12
Z GREAT ROCK ISLAND ROUTE. (

AAn6Au nO9N B06k1bvO nOV q
HEATED
MOST HoRToM CHAR cars built
FINEST
sEvENTy-FfvE
ALBERT LEA ROUTE,
raj
Re- b. CABLE, E. ST. JOHN,
Manager Gen T'k'tA Pass'r As't
CHICAGO
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

was behind on his house rent. The sub
ject was referred to the Committee on
Fisheries, with instructions to bring in
specific date most convenient to all.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

ALEXANDRIA, Aug. ll.--Tweniy.two
deaths from cholera occurred heie
yesterday.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

PIrrsruRG, Aug. 1.-THE strike Of
the Pan Handle Railroad telegraph OPP
orators, inaugurated last evening, is
over. All the operators who left their
instruments have returned to work. The
company reinstatej them with the un.
derstanding that they would behave
Themselves. The Brotherhood officials
pronounce the telegram ordering the
Pan Handle operators out bogus one.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

An5 person having sheep pasture 10 rent will
and Il 70 their advantage TO call or write to the
subscriber, a. nearly every day sheep men call
on him 70 find them pasturnge. Call or wrlte 70
v. DkSsONvILLE, Hcibschs Block. corner Los
Angeles and Commercial street. 7. Q. Box %
aus I'm
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12
The Chinese waiting Game.


TopRSAy, Belgium, Aug. 1.-THE
trial Of Canon bernard, on charge Of
abstracting valuable papers and securi-
ties from the Episcopal Palace at Tour
nay, was concluded this morning. The
Canon was found not guilty.
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

LONDON. Aug. ii.--A dispatch from
Paris asserts that zorilias is in Spain,
where he is personally directing the up
risInqs in that country, which are sle-
clared to be spreading
Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-08-12

DRANK WITH SODA WATER
Is delicious. AL! druggists have it. 1t
is refreshing and cooling. Try 1t often.
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
AN ORDINANCE

ExEMrrINd CERTAIN FInEMEN FROM
STREET TAX.
BE 1t enacted and ordai,otl.by the Intend
bor0, South CaroliNa, in Council met. and
by tic, authority Of the same: -,
]. That fifty active members '0f each of
the fire companies i1oW organized iIr the
Town of WinnsbOrO, South CarQlii}A, be,
and ore hereby. exempt fromftho payment
Of Street Tax: Provided, That the said ex.
emption does not extend to tile member.
ship Of any of said fire companies whose
constitution and bylaws does not compel
the attendaflce. Of .sits members upon fall
regular meetings and drills: PI,0Didsd,
.tatrther, That no fireman shall be entitled
to said exemption unless he has been q
member Of one ofsaaid fire companies fol
thirty days prior to- the first day appointed
f9r the annual listiRg of persons liable Ii
street tax, and who Is not in arrears to his
,:;iIi' TSat the moi1befshfp Of no flro com.
provided for IN thfs. ordinance unless such
company shall canse TO be filed with tho
Town Clerk S6n OF before the last day an.
pointed for the listing Of persons liable to
Street tax, n certified; list 6f siteh 3f ifs
members 0S are entitled TO the said ex-
empt,on;s Provided, TiihtsuGhiistshail hot
GEN, aemtain the names of lRore tl'an aftY Ars,
SMfs That All ordinances or parts thereof
ind6nsistent with this ordinance are hereby
repcalcd.'' ''t -
bone in Council this 7th day of May,
1000 J.EGENrER,
~,-H''' Clerk Of Council
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
4 y Vl{s.. liSTStI vvS
u .,.,. REtsRll:ORT tsRll \,
{ 9r,!FHs. 3 !F .coSp1iTiio Il THE Is
WINNSBOR0 NATIONAL BANK.

-. . n = : \ MAN, . .,i-s
E;NNINNSBORO, in tho State Of South
NY Nu CAROLINA, at the close Of business
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
=, II 3 Z Il 3I.S s
NNarlens MeCants, Davis and Sc

u Wardens McCants, Davis aIds Seig
9S, s5 \ 9; +. I. :, X. .l} 1.
WI .', j. a . "I;s
|ti Wardens Davis, McCants and Seig
+, Iar. {s 8. 8, s, I. i. a.,.
'0Iti
Wardens Seigler, Davls and Nc
o"ns'' J, i, M,
- warden Davis subf1itted' tue! follow
ling ordinance, which, was adopted:
La it enacted and ordained by the Intend
antand, Wardens Of the Town of. Winns
W That n RBr tie nmfboses bVs'of of taxa3ion NJ,
owners of zeal ,ASftate, and personal, ,proper
X %is a!a' me e eGrPSSIave S . tne Sa,G
reai estate and personal properly to the
an poTR the Clerk l besWse be s tile st Gay Of May
II. That:eyery @ III i}lalc, eitjzeS Tctyweons the
the ageSs Of ti, sixteen and iiflXyeats Yhe
said Town fSp' sixtv w ilSvs. I sISll "t 'reSst& :,
with th&;ToWn Clerk at the same time as is
For mainp rst;'rns o OF o o astas ss oaSe a%d na
sonal properly, ~ :. l...-> 80!
~ taS'iill9t q. the ere9urementS M section
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
nusINESS NOTICES.

Old Fashioned People ~: ..
Usdd'to say tliat the horse shoe and "fontr
leaf' clover pf0ught good luck. This may
De true, but the times have changed, and
now If you want good luck and good health
all the year round, place on the shelf over
your kitchen door a bottle of Norman's s
Neutra izinS Cordial, the wonderful rene
dy for ltl st6liiacKft 1rpubes.
from FroMt,snt Ltwyer.
Maj, J, IL. Whittier; Of 'Gre@nyiHo; s: c.,
says: whilst ( do not rcgafN Norman )
NeutrhliMng G,QrdiaLas aunfvelYai Panacca,
yet 1t affords me pleasure. to- say, that 1
have used 1t with much benefit to self and
family In all affections Of the bowels 50
uSuaffh 1nlr.SrctiUf Of tire country during
the summer season. Indeed ] never used
any other medicine for such complaints"
DR. J: w WALKEH, FrankImton, N. G..
-Denrj Str"sM; Would you accept: tile ycel.,
grat4!aft6ASUf an old malr Tor your site
cessfnl treatment of a disclose that all otl,-
ef remedies had failed OH, and would YOU
also accept the enclosed $50. 90 as Il small
expression of my gratitude ere depart f6y
my Western home, T. have perfect free
ahd easy use Of my hands and arms, and
can also walk, things l have been lcbaretl
from for ten years, until the faSt tiiree
months: My rheumatism ,iSpWe!l.!' Your
Rheumatic Remedy cured: ine?! used 1t
only eight days, and twenty days from the
day began its use was we'll:
Truly yours, 4Hi,.', -;
80 d. HASTINGS KIMDALI,.
Oxford, y. c., April 3, 1889.
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
PROCEEDINGS OF COUNCIL.

WINNsBoRo, S. c., April 16, 1889.
! Council met this morning at 8 O'Clock
in the Town Hall-all the members
present. The minutes of the lust meet
ing were read and approved. Tho
oath Of office was administered xosnN1j.
j. w. scigler; Warden elect. 1ntend-
ant Neil, committee of one, appointed
to investigate tho condition and best
plan for repairing thereof on the Town
Hall, stated that after due investiga-
zion he would suggest that it be rooted
with shingles. Warden '''MctJarley
moved that tlsc Intendant be cmpow-
cred to have the roof repaired, using
Tin or shingles, as he deemed best after
Investigation aud due: consideration MS
to the difference il. cost Of the two ma
tcrials.. Messrs.;:W: r.. Doty and d.
II. Flcnnikonlappearcd before Council
and requested that the suspension of
the ordinance prohibiting the: deliver
jug and storing of al4tertili4crs in the
town be extended from ting first to the
twentieth of May; 'whcrcupons the fol-
lowing resolution was adoptcds = Il .
'''Rssglyea, That the time, May 1st, for the
rcnhoralfof Buapos and other commercial
fertilizers for the present year be extended
70 May 20tll--after which date tho Ordi-
ether commercial fertilizers from the town
Will be rlHdly enforced by this Council.
:, The; Clerk was .h,strnctcd to have the
ordinaDce. with this resolution, pub
lished at once:
The bid Of Mr.. T.. NJ. Garrison for
the rent of Stalls ahd of the market
for one year from the first Of May,
l883, for, ono hundred and forty dol
lars, was accepted. ~<.
>, Mr.. j. II. Cummings and nMessrs.
MoMaster, Brice u Ketchin submitted
bids forfumlishing oil, chimneys, wicks,
burners. and matches for the Use of. the
street lamps for one year from May /,
1885,. Mr.. Cummings making tho low
pst bid, the contract, on motion, was
awarded to him,r ~. - ~ t
i Applications 10 sorvo on tho police
force woro received from Mcssrs. w.
%. Gilbcrtaptl l.. Poteet. They wcro
olcctedta policemen, the former at q
salary Of $40 and the latter at salary
Of S25 per month, and two uniforms
qach per annum, to servo during the
plcnstsfo.2f Gonncil%,.. j .,nx
Madison CLARK and Willis Goode
were retaihed, rs lanp-lighters,. alta
salary ;pfSlO per month each, to serve
attic pleasure of Cqiptii',l As,'-'
An election for Chief and Assistant
Chief of the Fire Department was held,
resulting in The reelection of-Mr. R.
j. McCarley rs Chief and Mr.. j. W.
Sciglcr as Assistant.
Col. james II. Rton was unanimous.
~ reelected as Councils attorney for
this municipal year. The Clerk was
instructed to notify him of his re-elcc.
ton. a
The following resolution was adopt.
ed: Il,
!. Resoloed, That the following committeos
be appointed by the Intendant, to consist
OF three (3) members each, and the lii.
tepdant be q member Rc-0Bfcto Of each OF
said committees: A committee on street
lamps; q committee OH police and fire de-
partment; q committee on public buildings.
4 The following arc the committees III
their regular oidcr;
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10

STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA-CoUNfY or
FAinFIELD-ss; ~ asn:".
I, r. X. ELLIO1"T, Cashier Of the above
named bank, do solcmnly swear that the
above statement Is true to the best of nv
knowledge and belief. 80" ..;'.''
II. M ELLIOTT, Cashier.
Subscribed and sworn to before me this
9th day Of May, 1888.
VIM. N. CHANDLER, Notary Public. e..
:. CoRREcT-Attcst
s.. i il, SSHSsSSS; H$SsjS:TSs;' $;sS; Directors.
May 10-tl <-sa .~ ..>.'s.~-~.
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
AN dbRgDHNANdyE

TO PREVENT THE RUNNING AT LARGE OF
INTHE CoRronApE IrMiis
BE 1t Ordained, That it shall not be law
fipl for any person or persons to permit
hogs, goats, sheep, COWS and geese TO run
at large witbin,tl,eS corporate lihitsSof the
town, finder penalty of. twenty-five cents
per head for violation of this ordinance,
except that cows are allowed to be grazed
Street, subject to the following c6mditfm,st
That they be securely haltcrcd and held
while grazing, and grazed only between the
hours of o'clock, a. hi..; and IL O'clock, III.
j. N. CENTER,
Clerk Of Council
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10

Why are you ill? Why do you suffer?
Everybody knows all aches and paths, an
languor and debility are cured by Browns
Iron DitterS. "l. a
The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1883-05-10
!, LOCAL INTEL i6ENCE.
sTHURsDAY. MAY 10. 1883.


local Brlen. a;n g. i. II q, +
-Messrs. VIM H. Lyles aud J,aT.
Baron, .of. .Ca1qmbi4 we,ia:intown:ou
Wednesday, attending to professional
business. 'nf# s.. ~" ksi,.
49,, We are requested to state that
owing to q misunderstanding 9haht the
grounds for .the.Prcebytcr Sabbath
rsvl,dol picnic; it ttis for tho present post
poncdu', ';nseN ''-'' '@-TTiyf:; : ~;
! Approved county paperand school
certificates bought and cash paid*fo
same,hy.T. W:'Iau,lerdule. ~ at
:. The municipal election in Char
latte resulted ilia sweeping victory for
the Democrats. r. II. Robertson, Esq,
formerly Of Winnsboro, was elected
aldcrlnap .fram. tho third ward, Icceiy-
ingniext TO tic highest vote cast fou
any candidate. '"" -,
We arc requested to announce that
there will be meeting in the law Office
Of j. W. Hanahan, ESQ.,, Tonight at 8
'o,cDck, to perfect arrangements for es-
tablishilIgas rcading-room in Winns-
boro.t, It is caNnestly requested that
al, Interested in tho project will
promptly attend;..,,n -, '';',;
y Leave your orders i;wstM Caldwell
70 Laudortlalo for standard Fertilizers
Wando and Snluda Guanos, Acid,
Kainit, &c. ;: :. =. -.
ITEMS FROM IelDGEwAY.-The',R ,Rcy.
ii. 0. Judd, assistant rector of 'Frinity
church, Columbia, held services last
SundaNht St.iStephcn's church. .
The Normal School building is fin
ishcd, and the school is now in flour
,ishing condition. Forty,;;phptls ARE III,
attendance. Professor Rrainerd Nc
Lure, a graduate Of Rrinccton College,,
is in charge. Tho large .hallS with
which the cupola is suppliedy rings out
dts clear notes sunmoning the children
to. their duties. /" ~, ~,
Departed this life, at. Ridgeway, on
Monday morning, tho 9TH inst, Miss
Monte Stewart, daughter of, Mr.. James
r., Stewart. The sS'mpathios - of the
community are extended to the be-
rcayed father p.
1.-The children composing tho Sunday
School Of the Methodist church cclc-
,bratetl "Childrcn's Day" last Saturday
Of Palmer's spring. The day was
universally enjoyed. - !,
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1883-12-09
MISCELLANEOUS.
The Great English Remedy

Is a never failin :,
cure for NeryOu
Debility, Exhaus-
ted vitality, Sem
inal Weakness,
L ost Manhood,
Impoteucy, Pros
tasorrhea, Paraly-
sis and all the ter
rible effects of
Self Abuse, youth
full foilies and ex-
ceSSes in Maturer
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1883-12-09
DIR. 8 PIN n r. n,
no. II Kearny Street,
Treats Iii Chronic and Special Diseases.

ounS Men
ILyhO May be Suffering frOssi the
w effects of youthful follies or indiscretian
viii do well to avail themselves of this, the
greatest boon ever laid on the altar OF suf-
fering humanity. DR.. Spinney viii guarantee
60 forfeit $500 for every case of Seminal Weak
cess private disease of any kind or character
Which he undertakes and fails to cure.
MIDDLE-AGED MEN.
There are many at the age of thirty to sixty
who are troubled with too frequent excavations
OF the bladder, often accompanied by slight
martin- or burning sensation and q weakening
Of the s. stem iii manner the patient cannot
account for. On examining the urinary de
posts a ropy sediment viii often be found. and
sometimes small particles OF albumen will APP
pear, or the color will be OF thin mikish hue,
again changing to dark and torpid appear
ance. There are mang men wis die Of this diff
Gc,llty, ignorant Of the cause, which Is the sec
end stage of seminal weakness DR.. 5. will
guarantee perfect cure in all such cases, and
a healthy restoration If the genito urinary
organs.
Office Hours-10 to and 6 to s. Sundays,
from ID to IL q. m. Consultation free,
Thoyough examination and advice, So.
Call or address DR.. SPiNNEY x co.
NO. II kearny St. San Francisco.
ian2itf
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1883-12-09
MISCELLANEOUS.

7 II il Great
StFeDgt b e H.
Ing Remedy
q N Il n or We
Tonic is the
legitimate result
of over twenty
years practice and
CURES w 1T
L N FA NC
G Z Il TAIN T Y
Nervous and phys
ical Debility, Sem
il a w q n T. =, aS,
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1883-12-09

Impotency, Exhausted Vitality, Premature De-
cline. and LOSS OF MANHOOD, sn
all its com plic~ti0MS. nna from
whaserer cause lproduced. 1t en-
riches and purifies the Blood, Strengthens the
Nerqes, Brain, Muscles, Digestion, Reproduc-
tive Organs, and Physical and Mental Faculties.
1t stops an unnatural and facilitating drain
upon the system: preventing involuntary losses,
facilitating dreams, senli!e losses with the
urine, etc, so destructive to mind and body.
1t is sure eliminator of all KIDNEY AND
BLADDER COMPLAINTS. 1t contains no
injurious ingredients. To those suffer.
ing from the evil effect. Of yOui h.
fuB indi-cre ton or exc. S., a sYe cs,y
thorough and permanent CCRE
Is GUAkANTEED. Price, 81 so per
bottle, or five bottles in case with full direc-
items and advice, $40. Sent secure from OBJ
servation to any address upon the receipt of
price, or G. o. ID. To be had only of
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1883-12-09

wears, such as Loss OF Memory, Lassitude,
Nocturnal Emissions, Aversious to Society,
Di.nGess of Vision, Noises in the Head; the vital
Guild passing unobserved in the urine. and many
ether diseases that lead to Insanity and Death.
DIR. NINTH. who is a regular physician
graduate OF the University of Pennsylvania)
will agree to forfeit FIVE HUNDRED DOL
LARS for a case of this kind the VITAL RES
TORATIVE (under his special advice and treat
uent) will not cure, or for anything impure or
injurious found in it. DIR. MINTIE treats all
private diseases successfully without mercury
Consultation free. Thorough examination and
advice, including analysis Of urine, IS. Price OF
VITAL RESTORATIVE, So bottle, or four
times the quantity. so; sent to any address
upon receipt of price, or C. o. D., secure from
observation and in private name ii desired, by
E.. A. MINTIE, NJ D.,
IL kearncy St., San rancisco, Cal.
SAMPLE BOTTLE FREE will be sent to any
eae applying by letter, stating symptoms, sex
and age. Strict secrecy in regard to all husi-
uess transactions.
DIR. MiNTiES KIDNEY REMEDY-NEP-
HRETICUN cures all kinds Of kidney and
bladder complaints, gonorrheea. gleet, lcucor-
rlioea. For sale by all druggists; 81 bottle;
six bottles for s..
DIR. MINTIES DANDELION PILLS are the
best and cheapest Dyspepsia and Bilious cure
ia the market. For sale by all druggists.
ianI9t
The Douglas independent. [volume] (Roseburg, Or.) 187?-1885, 1883-03-10
FOREIGN NEWS AND GOSSIP.

Vieuxtemps' collection of violins has
been sold for SIC. 800.
A memorial window for Milton, the
poet, is to be placed in Horton. England
village church, in which Milton's moth.
.er is buried.
The throne t. be used at the Cars
coronation has already been ordered. II
will be made of black oak, richly carved
in antique Slavonic patterns, and will
cost over $4,000.
Alexander Sherman, OF athens, Ga.
proposed to eat ten-pound fish raw il
Shelton Jester would give him fish oi
the same weight. Jester told Sherman
to go ahead, and Sherman at once de-
voured the fish, declaring that it was the
best meal he had eaten in month o.
Sundays.
The Sunday Argus, of Louisville, Ky.
perpetrates this weighty jest: Does
your Helen remind you of Helen O.
Troy?" she asked sweetly, as the sofs
springs fattened under pressure OF l6t
pounds. mo, not precisely; yo1 re
mind me more of Helen of Averdupois,
was the scaley reply.
A CITIZEN of st. Louis makes the fol
lowing offer: II will eat five pies withir
one hour for thirty days, between thu
hours of IL and 10 O'Clock, or, if tina
don't do #, I will wager $500 in match
go-as-you- please, that will eat more pie
In given time, say ten hours. tnan an,
other man in st. Lous.
The Douglas independent. [volume] (Roseburg, Or.) 187?-1885, 1883-03-10
The New Boy.

He was brand new Office boy, young,
pretty-faced, with golden ringlets and
blue eyes. Just such boy as you would
imagine would be taken out of his little
truDdle-bed in the middle of the night
and transported beyond the stars. The
first day he glanced over the library in
the editorial room, became acquainted
with everybody, knew all the printers,
and went home in the evening as happy
and CHEEKY as sunbeam. The next day
he sppeared, leaned out of the back win
dow, expectorated on q bald headed
printers pate. tied the cat up by the tail
in the hallway, had four fights with
anether boy, borrowed 50 from an occu-
pant of the building, saying his mother
was dead, collected two DAYS pay from
the cashier, hit the janitor witha broom
stick, pawned a coat belonging to q
member of the editorial staff, wrenched
the knobs off the doors, upse. the ice
cooler, pied three galleys of type, and
mashed his finger in the small press. On
the third day . note was received saying:
s.Mi Mother don't want to work in such
q dull place. She says would make a
Good preacher. So Do I, mi finger is
Betteri gone fishin. Yours til death Do
Yank US. Boston Courier.
The Douglas independent. [volume] (Roseburg, Or.) 187?-1885, 1883-03-10
WIT AND HUMOR.

The cheapest way to purchase: Buy
the yard.
Many man who wears glossy boots
shines at the wrong extremity
A fishmonger is never generous; be,
cause his business makes him selfish
(sell fish,.
In Siam the people worship the ele-
phant. In this country they only want
to see him.
The smallest beggar in Louisville is
scarcely more than two feet, high but he
works the street cars.
A trapeze performer is at the height
of his popularity when his head touches
the circus canvas at the top.
"It is the little bits ov things that fret
and worry us" says Josh Billings; swe
kan dodge an elephant. but we kant a
fy."l
II you kant trust man to the full
amount let him skip. This trying to git
an average on honesty has always been a
failure. Josh Billings.
There is nothing that more nearly ap-
proaches perpetual motion than the yelp.
ing of mongrel pup when first sepa.
rated from It's matrnal ancestor.
Having failed to annihilate Moses, Mr..
Robert Ingersoll will now turn his at.
tention to the Rev. De Witt Talmage
Folks will now begin to take some inter.
est in his performance.
A woman who lost finger in the en-
ploy of a Brooklyn manufacturer sued
and got verdict of $500, and the Louis
vile Courier.J Journal recklessly adds
''She did not reflect that while she lost
only afinger, her employer lost hand y
Have you over tried the faith cure?'
asked long haired ,sallow- faced stranger
addressing gentleman who sat behind
him in Brooklyn street car. 81 have.
was the answer. do you believe in it?'
Il do. May / ask. then, of what you
were cured?' Certainly; / was cured
of my faith. - Brooklyn Eagle.