Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1883-10-17
THE SEXTON'S BOOTS.


MIR. King was the sexton of the
Fifth Church in Wingohocking; and Mr..
Kings boots creaked.
IL has never been ascertained with
precision why a sexton always prefers
boots that creak, but the fact that he
has such a preference is unquestiona-
BILE.
Mr.. Kings boots creaked mildly
when he showed seats TO visitors before
service; they creaked painfully when he
walked up the aisle TO subdue Kissing
gas-jet just as the sermon was begin
ming; but they creaked vehemently when
he would try to creep stealthily towards
the pulpit, during prayer-time, to whis-
per to DIR. Jones that patient demanded
his immediate attention.
1t is popularity of the sections
boots that they are noisiest when he is
trying to achieve cat-like tread.
When Mr.. King stepped tenderly, it
seemed as II every pore in the leather
became vociferous.
There were, i'm the congregation,
many nervous and irritable people, who
permitted themselves to suffer exceed
ingly from the noises made by Mr..
Kings boots. Whenever the sexton
started upon n journey up the aisle
these persons would follow his footsteps
with their attention; they would detect
certain rhythmic succession in the
creaks, rs they would permit their
attention thus to be diverted from the
services and the sermon.
Irritable people who allow themselves
TO dwell upon matter of this kind very
soon find that the thing that annoys
them, whatever it is, becomes at last
intolcrablc. And one Sunday, when
Mr.. King had assembled the aisle an
unusual number of times, to shut the
heat-rcgisters, to turn down the gas, to
summon DIR. Jones, and to whisper to
one of the deacons about pew he had
omitted in taking up the collections,
some of the sufferers from the noise
made by Mr.. Kings boots resolved that
something would have to be done about
them.
And so, after sermon, Deacon SIAM
mers and Mr.. Brickcr stopped in the
vestibule and drew the sexton aside.
"Mr King" said the deacon. "why
is it that your boots creak so loudlyP"
"My bootsr' responded Mr.. King,
"why, my boots don't creakw
1T is not possible" exclaimed Mr..
Bricker, 'ahat you are not aware that
your boots crcak in an extraordinary
Manner
II never noticed it," said Mr. King.
"Wcll," said the deacon, cit is fact,
anyhow; and as the noise Is very un-
pleasant, I'd like to ask il you won't
wear another pair of boots-on Sunday,
after this?'
sponded Mr.. King, somewhat rucfully.
"Some of us might subscribe to get
you another pair" said Mr.. Bricker,
sarcastically.
II have an old pair of slippers" re-
marked the sexton.
"They will do; wear them next Sun
day." said the deacon. Bring them
to church in your coat pocket, and put
your boots in the closet under the gal
lery-siairs, during service"
Every WELL" responded the sexton,
'I'll do So"
On the next Sunday Mr.. King glidcd
up and down the aisle as silently as if
he had been shadow. He had on his
slippers, and not creak was heard
Many of the members of the congrega-
ton looked as il they were surprised at
the noiselcssness of his fitting to and
fro. Mr.. Bricker and the deacon
watched him with pleasure. In fact
they followed his movements with so
much satisfaction that it is really doubt
full if they enjoyed the worship and the
sermon any more than they had done
hn Ii e h. 4.
annoyed them and diverted their atten-
ton.
During the services snow-storm
came up, and when the congregation
was dismissed several inches of snow
lay upon the church-stcps and upon the
pavement in front of them.
Mr.. King made no attempt to brush
it off, and when the deacon and Mr..
Bricker came into the vestibule they
found him standing there, looking very
disconsolate.
you know he said, looking down
at his forlorn and faded slippers,
''you told me to put my boots in the
closet under the gallery-stairs. did so
when / came here in the morning, and
now they are gone"
Gomez exclaimed Mr.. Bricker and
the deacon.
"Gone!" said Mr.. King, as he led
them to the closet and opened the door
II put them right in here"
Mr.. Bricker struck match, for the
closet was dark; and then he looked
carefully all around the interior
Somebody must have stolen them," he
said.
"Did you lock the doorp" asked the
deacon.
mo, sir; never dreamed anybody
would go looking in there after my
boots. How am ! to get home in all this
snowp"
at is too bad" said Mr.. Bricker.
"You stay here" remarked the dea-
con, "and I'll send you round pair of
arctic overshoes.
"And We'll pay you the price of an
other pair of boots" said Mr.. Bricker,
who was well-known as generous,
'free-handedn man.
Certainly" rejoined the deacon,
here Is my contribution.
Mr.. Bricker and the deacon then went
away. Could IL have been the satisfac-
ton caused by the promise of new
pair of boots that impelled Mr.. King to
smile, as he locked the front door be-
hind the two menp Was IL the hope
that he might still discover the missing
boots that enticcd him into the closet,
where he lighted q candle and shut the
door from tho insidep
Mr.. King wore his new boots on the
following Sunday. They creaked fer