The Benton weekly record. [volume] (Benton, Mont.) 1880-1885, 1883-09-29
NIECE AS WE'LL AS DAUGHTER.
A Too Happy Father Reminds an
Uncle That He Too May Smile

Too Happy Father Reminds an
Uncle That He Too May Smile.
Denver Tribune.
Mr.. j. S. Brown was in gloomy frame
of mind. Mr.. J. F. Brown, on the con-
trary, was as smiling and clipper as a
spring morning. Ms.J. S. Brown Groom
ed moodily over the ledgers and complain
ed of the pale ink and rusty pens, while
Mr.. j. F. Brown smiled and smirked and
hummed gentle lullaby over the pages
of figures before him.
"Humph." grunted Mr.. J. S. Brown,
bitterly.
cha, ha, ha," softly laughed Mr.. J. F.
Brown.
Brown said Mr.. S. Brown, lifting
himself up from his desk and turning
around on his stool; "Brown, I feel called
upon to reproye you for the frivolty you
have exhibited during the past week. You
have neglected your work-you have ar
rived here late every morning and left
here early every afternoon-your business
has been done in loose and incompetent
manner, and as natural result our mutual
interests are suffering"
Mr.. J. F. Brown looked grieved. Never
before had he been addressed in terms OF
reproach by Mr.. j. S. Rrown.
'But, Brown" expostulated Mr.. J. F.
Brown, ''you seem to forget that
81 forgetnothing, interrupted Mr.. J.
S. Brown; "I am perfectly well aware that
you have new baby-daughter up at your
house. How could forget it, when / am
reminded of the fact every fifteen or twen-
ty minutes? A daughter, Brown, is good
enough and has, admit, certain advan-
tages in her way, but | submit, Brown,
that daughter is no excuse for the exces-
sive levity and coltishness of which you
have been guilty for the past week.
"I-I-don't understand" stammered
Mr.. j. F. Brown, blushing deeply.
81 will be more explicit will ex-
plain,'' continued Mr.J. S. Brown, still
maintaining an air and tone of frigid aus
terity: "Since the birth Of your daughter
you have been worldly in your manner and
conversation. Have not heard you every
70 yourself certain lullabies and tunes sup
posed to have been invented purely for the
cradle and nursery? Need remind you
that frequently, when you should have
been making out invoices of canned toma-
toes and picked Goldfish, have found you
dreamil humming frivolous song en-
titled 'Peek-a-boo' to yourself?"
"Ah, my dear Brown" sighed Mr.. j.
F. Brown sadly, "you do not appreciate
how sweet boon ones daughter is to
one.''
There you are again - exclaimed Mr..
J. S. Brown. "There you go again with
your maudlin sentiment. Your daughter,
indeed W Well--I-I-well-o bah.''
And Mr.. j. S. Brown nearly choked
with chagrin and disgust, while Mr.. j.
F. Brown sat mutely by and nervously bit
his finger nails, aad vainly tried to keep
the tears from brimming over his eyelids
''You seem to forget, Brown" said Mr..
j. F. Brown finally, very tremulously and
very tenderly, ''you seem to forget that
while she is my daughter, she is your
niece"
Mr.. j. S. Brown started as it he had
been toying with the business end of an
electric battery. A new and bright idea
seemed to have dawned upon him. His
lowerjaw fell, his eyes opened to their wild
est capacity, and look of combined as.
tonishment and pleasure crept over hi
face.
"Brown," murmured Mr.. J. S. Brown
family and unsteadily, "say it again an6
say it slow.''
9'You seem to forget repeated Mr.. J
F. Brown, ''that while she is my daughte
she is at the same time your niece
"Well, Iswum!'' exclaimed Mr.. J. S
Brown, ''I never thought of that"
cit is, nevertheless, an incontroyertibl,
fact" solemly added Mr.. j. F. Brown.
$50 it is, Brown, SO it is - cried Mr.. J
S. Brown; ''and I am indeed an uncle
Ha, ha, ha-an uncle--Whoopee! Wei
close up the store--the clerks shall have
holiday-and, Brown, come closer to me
we'll have a lemonade and cigars al
around till we can't rest. Your daughter
my niece--Brown, old fellow congratu
late you'll"