The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1883-12-25
"The Day We Celebrate"
Hon. Thomas H. Reeds Speech at the New
England Dinner ia Philadelphia.

AT the annual dinner Of the New England
Society of Philadelphia Saturday evening,
Hon. Thomas B. Reed, responding to the tcast,
"The Day We Celebrate" spoke as follows;
Ny first duty will be to bringyou back from an
eent history, of which I know nothing, abso-
lutely nothing, to modern times From job day
down to the present it has been considered that
mans best gift is a host of friends. 1t appears
that am thus fortunately situated. Laughter
and applause. You have pursued me for
months and months a voice-"Yes, for
years,"1 and am here Tonight because could
not get away. have come to get rid OF you.
Laughter. At the outstart was confronted
with predicament. l was notified that
would be expected to talk about the day we
celebrate There are usually two ways OF get
ting out OF this predicament. Cne way is to
prepare speech. The other way is not to.
Laughter. If you prepare the speech and la
Dor over it with care, you may deliver your
self of a satisfactory address, like that OF my
friend, Secretary Chandler, for instance. Pro-
longed cheers and applause But having pre-
pared this speech, the chances are, 1t won't
join on to the other speeches. Laughter. 1t
will neither follow suit nor play trumps.
Laughter. This is the dilemma in which
am, in which have been ever since the elo-
quept missive of the smiling secretary OF the
association-ahi I see him sitting over there,
smiling still loud laughter and applause was
lifted from my doorstep.
Now, long ago made up my mind not to
bother about doing to-day what can just as well
be put off till tomorrow. Laughter In pre-
pairing a speech you sacrifice and consume
much valuable time in anguish and anxiety
that might otherwise have been hours OF en-
joyment. Besides, you have before you the
uncertainty of the future Whereas, IN the
other instance, the anguish don't begin until
the celebration commences. Laughter and
app,ause] AS one OF the Pilgrim Fathers re-
marked: "The past is tolerably secure"
Laughter.
''It was proposed to have me come over
here on the same train with lot of railroad
directors QIaughter.] Mr.. Reed paused a
moment until the merriment had subsidized,
then grew suddenly mock-serious, and con-
tinued, with indescrbably droll gesture:
'They seem to have forgotten, Mr.. President,
what New England Congressman ought to
be. Loud laughterl. He has to be good man
LLaughterl aud he has also 10 look like good
man lApplause and laughterl, and he is ex-
pected to look obtrusively good renewed laugh
teri. What would the good deacons up in
Maine think if they heard | was travelling
around the country with Monopoly? Laugh
teri The smiling Secretary, in his note OF
invitation, said, Tho day we celebrate is
yours l am glad he put in that plural
[Laughter.1 II is not my day. The day l
celebrate is the day after. Loud laughter
and applause What is this day we celebrate?
Fortunately | recollected that there was a
Boston man IN Town, anu, as DOSIOH men hnOW
everything Laughter and clapping of hands,,
/ asked him what day it was. He said it was
the Pilgrims Day. / asked what day that
was. [Langhter.1 He replied, The day on
which the Pilgrims landed. Now there are
two days. Every December the Boston papers
devote two columns to proving that Pilgrims
day ought to come on te 23d OF the month.
About two weeks afterward you will find
another two columns devoted to proving that
Pilgrims Day comes by right on the I'D. So
I say the day we celebrate ought to be kept
up for forty-eight hours. Laughter.l l for
got to tell you, though, that / didn't come over
at that time. [Renewed laughter and ap-
plause. AS I don't know anything about
Pilgrims Day, I am in the proper spirit to
make new speech on the occasion. Laugh
teri 1t must strike you that am talking
good deal about myself. Laughter have
an honorable precedent, in the person of SEN
ator Hawley, upon the occasion Of the last
annual dinner. That was biography, this is
an autobiography. Laughter. have never
done anything that anybody except me can re-
member [laughter], but Senator Hawley has
done many things which history will be slow
to forget. ICheers and applause.
They say New England is getting smaller,
as the country grows, and that the sceptre is
departing from Israel Mr.. President, the
sceptre is not departing from Israel New En-
gland will be as dominant when we have 20O,-
100000 OF population as she is to-day. LVocit-
erous cheers and applause