Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1883-11-30

they passed gas-lamp in the hall. In
five minutes they arrived at the widows
house. As the door opened the footman
looked at the major and began to grin
from ear to ear but Harry, who walked
behind soon stopped the hunkey's mirth
by putting his finger to his lips and dis
playing n half-sovereign. The result of
this man@uvre was magical and having
told the major to go up first, the latter
was conducted with becoming gravity to
the drawing-room where Mrs. Lomax was
anxiously waiting for him to open the
dance.
"Major Wagstaff!" cries the footman.
"How dye do, my doar madam" be-
gan the little major with his politest bow
''allow me to wish you happy New
Year." He saw, however, to his aston
ishment, the happy face Of the widow
grow broader, and an irrepressible smile
wreathing round her lips as she replied /:
ooh, Major Wagstaff, hover funny
er-you are"
Funny, madam ! really fail to see
any fun in my remark; l can assure you
it came from the bottom Of my heart"
Hereupon the widow burst into fit Of
uncomfortable laughter, followed III this
by everybody in the room.
Good heavens madam, what is the
cause of this ill-timed mirth," cried the
indignant major.
"Your funny" (sob) chair (sob),
shrieked the widow.
The major, happening at that moment
to catch n glimpse of himself in pier
glass close at hand, saw to his horror that
the locks that hitherto had been as black
as the ravens wing were now as fiery MS
the rising sun. Yes, notwithstanding the
fact that the hair on his face was jet black,
that on his head was glowing red. Red !
no, say carrots With terrible i'm
precation he rushed from the house and
returned to his lodgings, and dreading
the universal chaff that would for the
future await him on all sides, and know
ing his reputation as lady-killer was gone
forever, lie left Thorpestone the next
morning.
As he flew down stairs there was one
person, however, who gave an inward
chuckle of satisfaction, and that was Mas
ter Harry, who had waited on the landing
ensconced behind a curtain, and there
saw what almost unexpected success had
attended his cunningly- devised plot. For
Harry Newton had often observed that
when he and the major dined together be-
fore going'to dance or concert, no mat
ter how carefully the major might have
been dressed for dinner, he always made
a point of running upstairs for few
minutes just befor starting, and coming
down stairs with his hair unusually black,
glossy and well brushed. From which
phenomenon Harry easily concluded that
the very last piece of the majors toilet
was to change his ordinary wig for the
one he used on special occasions.
So as soon as they arranged to dine to-
gether, Harry betook himself to the colt
feur he knew Major Wagstaff patronized,
and after little pecuniary transaction
had passed between them, he found out
that not only was the barber accustomed
to redress the majors wig, but that he
actually had one of them in his hands
undergoing repair. So by dint of bribery
and persuasion Harry induced him to
make wig the exact fac smile of the
one then in his hands, only fiery red in.
stead of black. Having delayed dinner,
and having ordered the cabman to come
five minutes too soon, when dinner was
concluded, under the specious excuse Of
finding his cigarcase, he went to the ma
jor's bedroom and there to his delight on
the dressing-table lay glossy well-comb-
ed wig. Harry substituted the red one,
took away the matches from both the ma
ior's room and his own, and when the cab
came and the major found he was late,
what between the darkness and the hustle
he fell easily into the cleverly conceived
trap and never discovered his mistake
till he saw his carroty pate in Mrs. Lo-
max's pier-glass.
The widow soon recovered her equan-
unity, and the dance went off capitally. A
few days later old Mr.. Newton, seeing his
only rival disposed of, proposed to the
widow and was accepted. They are now
the happiest couple in Thorpeshire 4; and
if they ever happen to have fit of the
dumps or the blues they have only to
think of Major Wagstaff and his wig, and
a hearty laugh is the immediate result