River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1883-03-01
sIDE-sHoW SECRETS.
Whole Tribes OF Bogus Zulus-Natu
raj Curiosities Made to Order.


raj Curiosities Made to Order.
Philadelphia Times.
There is a letter from the agent of
the Wild man Of Madagascar" said
Hank Stone. as he dropped the sheet of
foolscap on the table and contemplated
the hieroglyphics through the bottom of
his beer glass. Mr.. Stone makes busi-
ness of engaging ATTRACTIONS for sircuses
and side-shows. He is now attached to
J. B. Doris's Inter-Ocean Circus and
Menagerie, show with which the I'M
tanned native of Madagascar is anxious
to exhibit himself. "Wild men are
played out" remarked Mr.. Stone. in a
decisive way "There was time when
wild man was adrawing card, and conn
try pepole would come hurling over the
fence to get sight of one in show,
but that day is gone by. Yousee there
never was a real out-and-out, Simon
pure, gilt-edge wild man in my show in
this country. They are all fakes
When | say fakes / mean something
tina isn't genuine. That day has gone
by the people are tired ofbeing scooped.
The wild man of Afghanistan was the
first one / ever knew. He was simply
mulatto, Tom CORTLAND found him in a
poor-house in Ulster county, New York,
and made good deal of money by
showing him in halls. A few seasons
later wild folks became a glut in the
market and there wasn't a novelty
among them until the Australian chill
dern were brought out. They were idiots,
of course, but they pulled many a dollar
into Barnum's old museum in New York.
He had wild niger, but his tuslzs didn't
fit him and he worried himself to death.
You see, Sam wanted a novelty and he
had all the coon's upper teeth pulled.
Then he got set offalse ones made-re-
gular tusks, that came out over the low
er lip. Why you never saw anything
that looked more like a gorilla than that
coon of Ashbridge's did. He only lived
a season though.
'tWell, should say genuine curiosities
are scarce. Why, there amt half q
dozen good ones in the country. OF
course, there are scores of standards,
such as fat women and living skeletons
and, dwarfs, but they are only good to
fill out with after strong cards are found.
Barnum's tatooed Greek was good
card, bnt he don't hold color well, and
when / saw him last fall he looked like
faded calico. Zulus never amounted to
much in this coua!ry. In England and
France they were great cards. Here
people were too intimately acquainted
with negro taracter to care for impor-
ted dose of it. / guess there were q
dozen genuine Zulus brought to this
country, bnt there were enough on ex-
hibition to form a regiment.
"Oh, it would be impossible to give
any idea of the salaries curiosities re-
ceive. Giants, dwarfs, fat women, and
skeletons, unless exceptionally big,
small, fat or lean are cheap. They all
value themselves at much higher salar-
les than they receive. Captain Constan-
tinus received big salary, but in less
then year after he came out they got to
making tatooed people. There will be
score OF tatooed men and three tatooed
women on the road next season. / had
letter from tatOoed woman ew days
ago. She wanted $40 week. / went TO
New York and looked her over and found
that she was stamped with indelible ink.
When / made this discovery she offered
to travel for 500 week. Aztecs are all
fakes and a brunette with good head OF
hair can, for $50, be transformed into a
Circassian beauty. After her hair is
dyed she has to wash in morning and
evening in beer and little shellac, III
order TO make it fluffy. Albinos are COM
mon and are no longer attractions, and
bearded woman are not worth their salt,
because so many of them wear false
boards. Electric people are all frauds;
and spotted men and leopard-boys are
simply diseased negroes.
There is fellow named Patterson in
New York that can turn out more
artificial freaks of nature than would I'LL
every side-show and circus IN the county;
but q freak isn't of much force If 1t isn't
real. Patterson can make anything,
from stuffed mermaid or a section of u
sea-serpent to five-horned oE or a
winged mule Speaping about Patterson
and mules reminds me that along just
after the war he got an order from one
of the LipmanS in Cincinnati to make ten
zebras cut of mules. Lipman sent on the
mules and Patterson paoceeded to stem
ell them in black and cfeam-culored
stripes. Patterson finished the joD in
six weeks and got $500. The artificial
1sbras were a Tsst on Of and the sree
parade of the circus. Every
thing was lovely for eight or ten days.
and then rain-storm washed the stripes
half out and made the brutes look SO
frightful that they had to be sent back
to Cincinnati. Patterson can take an or
binary COW and transform her into a
beast with four horns two of which are
apparently, growing out of her eyes
The truth is that the horns are glued
over the eyes. The horns are taken of
at night, but the cow generally becomes
blind after short time. He can set
glass eyes in the middle of a bulls fore
head or in his hip so naturally that al
most any one would be deceived. tell
Won fhnt Pnffarsn1n ic ON artist y