Middletown transcript., 1883-02-02
DID EVE RECEIVE CALLERS.


| A lady who received callers on New
Years writes to.the San far iss opinion
as to whether Eve FURNISHED her New
Years callers wine or a8ee, when
they called upon her in the Garden of
Eden, and what we think about the
Adam and Eve business, anyway as
family to take pattern after The Sun
is like hotel clock or a ticket agent,
always willing to tell all it knows, and
do it politely, but such questions as the
above require too much study IN orsler
to give clear answer. As ne eunderA
stand it Eve did not make. a praP..s
receiving callers on New Z ears That
is, she didn't have her name ard address
in the papers, though she remained at
home, and didn't hang out basket 8r
cards, and anybody that called was
welcome. The only caller she received
on the 1st of January of the year one,
was a fellow with his hair parted in
the middle, and a society smile, and the
report of the affair in the society paper
the next morning said she sat out the
best she had in the house, and the affair
was the event of the season. She may
not have served wine to the devil,
though he is alleged to have acted as
though he was half shot when he went
away. It is certain that the hosta1lz.
set up the apples, and they may have
turned to cider in his stomach, or he
may have been drinking Tom and Jerry
at a saloon before he started out calling.
It is probable that the first thing that
EYES caller said when he got in the
parlor, after leaving pair of last years
arctic overshoes in the hall, and looking
at pair of new ones there that he
thought would fit him, was, "Ah Thy
Joye, you know, wish you happy
New Year, awfully." And then he
laughed and chewed his cane, and Eve
kicked herfig leaf train under the piano
and stepped forward so her satin slip
pers would show under her dress, and
she said, Thanks The same to you.
You must give me card" Then we
have no reasonable doubt the caller,
while searching in his pocket for card,
smiled on Eve and said, els Adam
making calls to-day ?'' And when
Eve told her caller that Adam was out
fishing through hole in the ice, that
settled it. As we interpret the scrip
lures, the caller waited for Adam to
get back, to hear him lie about the fish
he had caught, and at being late, the
caller remained to supper, and they
talked over the apple trade, and the
caller, no doubt, gave Adam many
points on the apple crop of they t,Co,
and Adam sold short, and when he
came to deliver, he had to put up mar
gin OF get off the board of trade, and be
sold out. That is the way it looks at
this late day. Adam and Eve may
have been all right in their day, but to
copy after them nowadays would not be
popular In the first place they did not
have the advantage of growing up and
working for living, and hewing out
heir own fortunes. They were created
sull size to begin on, and set up in busi-
1ess with no effort on their part,
md they didn't know anything about
up children. AS near as we
,an get at it, Adam was a drinking
nan, who had rather go out and havea
ligh time, and come rolling home in
he morning, than to work the farm,
md it is no wonder Cain and Able
;urned out to be regular Waukesha
'oughs, and when we learned that Cain
lad killed Able, it did not surprise us a
bit. 1t was stand off which of them
should be killed, and Cain got the drop
on Able and he passed in his chips. If
Adam had been anything of man he
would have walked in amongst those
boys when they got to quarreling, and
took one of them by the collar, and the
other by the pants, and wiped the gravel
walk in the garden with them, and
showed them that while they might be
pretty healthy boys, they must not
think they owned the earth, and all,
and singular the appurtenances there
unto belonging, or words to that effect.
But Adam didn't have any gall. He
set them bad example. His going
into that apple speculation, at the in
stigation of the devil, shows what kind
of man he would be to run farm at
this age of the world. Peck's San.