Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1883-03-09
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THE BAD Boy IN A DRUG SToRE.-
SAID the grocery man, as he: went up to
the boy, snuffed a couple Of times, and
then held his hand to his nose 1.-THE
Board of Health will kerosene You if they
ever smell you. and send you to the glue
factory. What business have you gone
into that makes you smell 80 rank?''
swell, you see, pa began to think it was
time learned trade or perfession, and
he saw sign in a drug store window.
ssBoy Wanted, )" and as ne had q boy he did
MT want; he went to the druggist and got
Job for me. This smell on me will 60 off
in few weeks. You know wanted to
try all the perfumery in the store, and at.
ter got about forty different extracts Oh
my clothes. another boy who worked there
fixed up Q bottle of benzine and birthstone
and whole lot Of other stuff, and labeled
it Rose of Geraniums,'' and guess
Just wallered in it. It's awful, amt it !?
It kerflummuyed ma when went into the
dining-room the FIRST night and broke pa
up. The air seemed fixed around where
was, and everybody seemed to know wh.'
fixed it. A girl came into the store yes
terday to buy sachet, and there WASH,
anybody there but me, and I didn't know
what it was, and took down everything
in the store before found 1t, aud then
would not have found it, only the proprle
tor came 10. The girl asked the proprie
tor if there wasn't good deal of sewer
gas in the store, and be told me to 60 out
and shake myself. Well, she told me .
satchet was something for the stummick
and thought nursing bottle vas the
nearest thing to it.
II should think you would drive all the
customers away from the store, " said the
grocery man as he opened the door to let
the fresh air in.
II don t know but will, but I am hired
for month on trial and l shall stay. You
see, shan't practice on anybody but pa
for spell. made up my mind to thai
when gave woman some salts ms cad
of powdered borax, and she came back
mad. Pa seems to want to encourage
me, and is willing to take anything ask
him. He had sore throat and wanted
something for 1t, and the boss drugger told
me to put some tannin and chlorate of Lot-
ash into mortar and let pa pound it, aid
while he was pounding l dropped in q
couple of drops of suIpnuric acid and il
exploded and bowed pas hat across the
store. and pa was whittier than sheet. He
said be guessed bis throat was all right.
and he wouldn't come near me again that
day. The next day pa came in and 1 VS.
laying for him. took white sedl z
powder and a blue one and dissolved til IN
in seperate glasses, and when pa came n
/ asked him if he didn't want some leu :
snade, and he said he did. and gave him
the sour one and he drank it. He said i
was too sour, and then gave him the
other glass, that looked like water, to take
the taste out of his mouth, aud. he drank
it. Well, sir, when those two powders
got together and began to siz and steam
and foam, pa nearly choked to death. and
the suds came out Of his nostrils, and bis
eyes struck out. and as soon as he could
get breath he yelled fire 7 and said he was
poisoned, and called for doctor. but
thought as long as we bad a doctor right
in the family there was no use in hirns
one. SO got a stomach pumps and Iwould
have had him bailed out in no time, only
the proprietor came in and told me to 60
and wash some bottles. and he gave pa a
drink of brandy, and he said he felt bet
ter. Pa has learned where we keep tht
liquor, and he comes in two or three times
q day with pain In his stomach. They
play awful tricks on boy in adrug store.
The first day they put chunk OF some
thing sort of blue into mortar, and tol,
me to pulverize it, and make it into two
grain pills. Well, slr, pounded that
chunk all the forenoon and it never pulver
lied at all, and the boss told me to hurry
up, az the woman was waiting for the pills,
and mauled it till was most dead, and
when it was time to 60 to supper the b SIS
came and looked into the mortar and took
the chunk and said You have been
pounding all day on a chunk of India rub
Der instead of blue mass!' Well, how
/ kna-y But will get even with then,
if stay long enough, and don't you for
get it. If you rave a prescription you
want filled, you come down to the store
and will put it up for you myself. and
then you will be sure to get what you pay
for.''
YES" said the grocery man, as he cut
off piece of Limberger Cheese and put it
on the stove to purify the air in the room,
II should laugh to see myself taking any
medicine you put ups
A bald-head man who has heard that the
hairs on mans head are numbered wants
to know if there is not some place where
he can obtain the back numbers.
The dear child has seen visitor open
and shut his patent hat, and fred with
noble emulation possesses himself of his
uncle's new and rigid stovepipe, which,
when the old gentleman is about to take
bis leave, is produced, somewhat resemb-
ling disreputable ACCORDION.
'''Taint bit funny, your hat ain't!"
says the young malefactor scornfully II
sat down on it three times and couldn't
get it to shut upl"
"Willyim, my son. says an economical
mother to her son, ''for mercy g sake don't
Keeping on tramping up and down che
floor in that manner-vou'Il wear out vOur