Daily Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1876-1884, 1883-02-23

Customs of Good Society Concerning
Invitations and Entertainments.


philadelphia Times.l
The usage Of the best Philadelphia so.
ciety, which Philadelphians themselves
think tho best in the world, ia very
peculiar and very punctilious, not to say
peremptorily particular, about the issue
of invitations to all entertainments, but
especially to wedding receptions. 1t is
q common thing to hear of intimate
friends of parents and brothers and Sis
ters being excluded from daughters
wedding. Sometimes it seems almost
impossible TO tell where and how and
why the line has been drawn, but in
almost every instance it is drawn wisely
and for good and valid reasons. There
are great many considerations that af-
feet wedding reception that do not ap.
ply to q reception of any other kind.
One is, that by acknowledged rule and
hereditary right, the bride, and no one
else, has the exclusive say. Any friends
of the bridegroom asked, or any friands
of anybody else, are with her sufferance
and consent. Persons who go about a
great deal, and attend many wedding
receptions, say they seldom saw one in
which even the best friends Of the bride.
groom, who did not happen to be init.
mate with the lady, did not feel re-
straint and sense of being secondary
guests under the brides parental roof.
1t is, in addition, to the bride the great
occasion when she bestows her honors
as well as administers her rebukes, set
Ting up all her social accounts both on
the debt and credit side, and she is ac-
cordingly very careful whom she favors
with invitations.
In many cases both bride and parents,
while willing to undergo the exacting re-
quirements Of church ceremony with
an audience of spectators, regard as
peculiarly sacred the few intermediate
hours that follow-the last property of
the daughter under the home shelter
and the first of her social duties as q
wife and woman--and are anxious that
no critical eye nor uncongenial presence
shall invade the family circle at such
The question of expense also
very often has an influence, although
kept judiciously in the background. The
desire to be as good as Others leads par
ents to decorate their houses on these
occasions, often in lavish style, and to
dispense the most generous hospitality
But even when the question of limited
Of house is overcome, the ca
terer's bill at SO or s. per person or more,
with wine additional, becomes an import.
ant consideration. After counting the
relatives Of two families and the
bridal attendants. it does not take
many guests to foot up a bill Of $500 as
things go now in fashionable society.
AT wedding reception last week there
were over hundred relatives present
Of the brides family on the fathers and
mothers side. 1t was "very quiet
with only members of the family and
4 few friends present, but it was really |
a very large reception.
So general has it been the rule for in
to wedding receptions to be
denied to friends of either party that no
discriminating person expects one I'M
ess they are very well acquainted with
the bride. Even then there are some-
times reasons why they are omitted,
md the matter is set right by the bride |
upon returning from her wedding trip
INVITING them to specially designed |
entertainments, o tea for
he overlooked elder folks, perhaps, or
dancing party for the younger in