The Lincoln County leader. [volume] (White Oaks, Lincoln County, N.M.) 1882-189?, 1883-08-11
THE BAD BOY.
From PECK sun.

the grocery, one evening, and the
grocery man got behind the cheese
box, while the ghost continued in
a sepulchral voice, ''doomed for a
certain time to walk the night"
and, waving a chair round, the
ghost strobe up to the grocery man
and with the other ghastly hand
reached into a box Of figs.
mo you amt no ghost, said the
grocery man, recognizing the bad
boy. ''Ghosts do not go prowling
around groceries stealing wormy
figs. What do you mean by this
sinful masquerade business My fa-
thcrvnever had no ghost"
30, we have struck it now," said
the bad boy, as he pulled off his
mask and rolled up the sheet he
had worn around him. We are GO
ing to have amateur theatricals to
raise money to have tire church
carpetcd, and | am going to boss
the job
"GOu don't saw" answered the
grocery man, as he thought how
much he could sell to the church
people for a strawberry aud ice
cream festival, and how little he
could sell for amateur t%heatricals.
"Who is going into it, and what
are you going to play =
"Pa and ma, and me, and the
minister, and three choir singers.
and my chum, aud the minister's
wife, and two deacons, and an Old
maid are rehearsing, but we have
not decided what to play yet.
They all want to play a different
play, and | am fixing it SO they
can all be satisfied. The minister
wants to play Hamlet, pa wants to
play Rip Van Wrinkle, ma wants to
play Mary Anderson, the
old maid wants to play a
boarding school play, and
the choir singers want an opera,
and the minister's wife wants to
play Lady Macbeth, and my chum
and me want to play a double song
and dance, and | am going to give
them all a show. We had a re-
hearsal last night, and | am the
'only one able to be around today.
You see they have all been study
ing different plays, and they all
wanted to talk at nce We let
the minister sail in first. He had
on a pair of his wife's black stock
ings, and a mantel made of linen
buggy lap blanket, and he wore a
mason's cheese knife such as these
fellows with poke bonnets and
white feathers wear when they get
an invitation to a funeral or al eX-
cursiou. Well, You never saw
Hamlet murdered the way he did
it. HIS interrogation Of the char
actcr was that Hamlet was a dude
hat talked through his nose, and
while he was repeating Hamlet's
soliloquy, pa, who had come in
with an old hunting suit on, as Rip
Van Wrinkle, went to sleep, and he
didn't wake up till Lady Macbeth
came in, in the sleep walking scene.
She couldn't find a knife, 50 | took
"a slice of watermelon and sharpen
ed it for her, and she made a mis-
take in the one she was to stab,
and she stabbed Hamlet in the
neck with a slice of watermelon,
and the core Of the melon fell on
pas face, as he lay asleep as Rip,
and when Lady Macbeth said, Out
damned spot pa woke up and felt
the COB of water melon on his face
and he thought he had been mnr-
dered, and ma came in on the hop.
skip and Jump, as 'P%arthenia, and
threw her arms around a deacon
who was going to play the grave
digger, and began to call him pet
Damcs, and pa was mad, and the
choir singers they began to sing,
In the North Sea lived "A whale
and then they quit acting. You'd
a dide to sec Hamlet. The piece
Of watermelon wcu1 down hisneck.
and LADY Macbeth went of and left
it in the wound under his collar
and ma had to pull it out, and
Hamlet said the seeds and Juice
was running down inside his shirt
and he said he wouldn't plaV II he
was going to be stabbed with "a
slice Of melon seeds ont of his neck
and drying the Juice on his shirt. !
sharpened a cucumber tor Lady
Macbeth to use for a dagger. but
Hamlet kicked on cucumbers, too
and | had more trouble than any
stage manager ever had. Then pa
wanted to rehearse the drunken
scene in Rip Van Wrinkle, where
he hugs Grechten and drinks out