Daily globe., 1883-08-25
PITH AND POINT.

The engine-ear ought to be on the
donkey engine.
The Harvard Lamp0o71 says Cam
bridge ton of coal is the champion light
weight.
The greatest talker in existence
could not talk long enough to tire
wagon wheel.
The diamond is the stone for an en-
gagement; but give US the old cobble-
stone in free fight.
MISERY loves company" That's
the reason a hen-pecked husband ad-
vises his friends to marry.
ONE who knows says that in the
the country they blow horn before
dinner, but in town they take one.
A YOUNG ladies' seminary blew up
the other day down East. It is sup
posed that spark got into the powder
room.
"Dwo vos sCHoosT enough, budt
dree was too blendy," remarked Hans,
when his girl asked him to take her
mother along with him to the dance
COUNTRY yokel (to his son, at con-
cert, during the performance of Duet
Dye see, Tom, now it's getting late,
they're singing two at time, so as to
get done sooner"
EUcHERED: Jack (admiringly) )-"You
are trump, Miss Marian" Miss M
why do you call me such a name as
that?" Jack (triumphantly)- y)-"Because
of your taking tricks"
SOMEBODY has discovered that the
correct pronunciation of the word
Khedive is "Kedowa." They might as
we'll tell us that the proper way to pro-
nounce beehive is behowa
"YoU have been very faithful, said
merchant to his clerk, "and as a reward
a pleasant little vacation is in store for
you" There came rush of business,
and the clerks vacation turned out to
be a vacation in store.-BltrIingto
Free Press.
The fat woman of downtown mu-
scum recently married the living sllel-
eton" belonging to the same show.
The youth of the Yonkers Statesman
sententiously remarks that she proba-
bly, went on the theory that nearer the
SOME railroad employs a female
switch-tender. Those officials are on
the right track-women are ahead of
anything as switch-tenders, as when
they are on duty the switch is never off,
and then they are always posted on the
proper time for trains, you know.
lMsnowy and blowy;
I'm freely, breezy sneezy and wheezy;
I'm mad glad and sad;
I'm hazardous and bliZZardous;
LIN airy, hairy, fairy and scary;
I'm clinging, ringing and singing:
I'm bowling, scOw1ing md growing;
I'm changy, rangy and NANCY;
I'm hofT1d, tland and anti ;i-torrid; x
I'm bilious, tedious and tough; Hs3
I'm TERRIBLE tricky and arc: %&e
I'm fearless, cherries and rough; =
I'm bad and my name is March.
-Dnscttte AdpertiSer
SHE said: For her part, she had no
opinion of these new-fangled nice folks
that are so dreadful particular about
diet, and can't eat nothing but vege-
tables and such hummery. She called
'em fools, as the Psalmist did" And
when some one inquired for the passage,
she cited Psalms owl. II, Is, to wit:
Fools, because of their transgression
and becsJtse Of their iniquities, are
afflicted; their soul abhorreth all man
ner Of meat. Coe9regGtionAIjSt.
"ARREsTED for carrying a pistol, was
he?" asked magistrate of an officer,
referring to q gentleman who had just
been arraigned. Lets see the pistol"
The weapon was produced, and handed
to the Judge, who examined it, and
asked-"Where did you get it,"
Bought it at hardware store" What
did it cost?" Fifteen dollars" Fine
implement. How'll you swop?' And
the Judge drew out a pistol, and handed
it to the prisoner. "Take SO to boot. ="
"AIl right. III fine you so. That
| makes US even"