Mohave County miner., 1883-03-04

was trying to explain how the book
 come be there, when the minister
 and the deacons started out, and then
 poured the two quart tin pal full
 of soft soap on the front step. It was
 this white soap, just tho color of the
 step, and when I got it spread I went
 down in the basement. The visitors
 came out and pa was trying to ex
 plain to them about HOyie. when
 One of the Deaeons Ste ,sesT. iii,,..s,
 suusznzaGsszlls -sz-s.su.s Soap.
 and h;c e5vJ flew up and he struck
 on his pants and slid down the steps.
 The minister said, Great heavens,
 deachn, are you hurt? Let me assist
 you,' and he took one or two quick
 steps, and you have seen thesed fel
 lows in nigger show that kick each
 other head over heels and fall on their ears, and stand on their heads
 and spin around like a top. The minister's feet slipped, and the next I saw he was standing on his head in his hat, and his legs were sort of wilted and fell limp by his side, and he fell over on his stomach, You talk about spreading the gospel in heather lands. It is nothing to the way you can spread 1t with two quarts eff soft soap. The minister didn't look pious a bit when he was trying to catch the railing. He looked as though he wanted to mnrder every man on earth, but It may be he was tired. We'll, pa was paralyzed, and he and the other deacon rushed out to pick up the minis4er and the first old man, and when they struck the steps they went kiting. Pas feet somehow slipped backwards, and he turned a summersault and struck full length on his back, and one heel was across the minister's neck, and he slid down the steps, and the other deacon fell all over the other three, and pa swore at them, and 1t was the worst looking lot of pious people l ever saw. I think If the minister had been in the woods somewhere where nobody could have heard him, he would have used language They all seemed mad at each other. The hired girl told ma there was three tramps out on the sidewalk fighting pa, and ma she took the broom and started to help pa, and tried to stop ma, 'cauee Ter constitution is not very strong and I didn't want her
 To Do Any Fly ing Trapese Esizness but I couldn't stop her, and she went out with the broom and a towel tied around her head, Well, l don't know where ma kid strike, but when she came in she said she had palpita ton of the heart, but that was rot the place where she put the arnica. o, but she did go through the air like a bullet through cheese, and when she went down the steps a bumpity-bump, I felt sorry for ma. The minister had got so he could sci | up on the sidewalk, with his back | against the lower step, when ma came sliding. down, and one of the heels of her gaiters hit the minister in the hair, and the other foot went | right through between his arm and his side, and the broom liked to pushed his teeth down his throat. But he was not mad at ma. As soon as he see it was ma he said: Why, | sister, the wicked stand in slippery places, don't they? and ma she was mad, and said for him to let go her and then pa was mad, and he said: Look here, you sky pilot, this thing has gone far enough,' and then a policeman came along, and first he thought they were all drunk, but he found they were respectable, and he got chip and scraped the soap off of them, and they went home, and pa and ma they got in the house some way, and just then the letter carrier came along, but he didn't have any letters for us, and he didn't come onto the steps, and then went ID stairs and I said, Pa, don't you think it is real mean, after you and fixed the soap on the steps for the etter carrier, he didn't come on the steps at all,' and pa was scraping jhe soap off his pants with piece of l shingle, and the hired girl was put ing iniment on ma and heating it in for palpitation of the heart, and pa ;ain, You dam idjut, no more of this