Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1883-08-03
AN OLD FILE IN THE SANCTUM.
The Ancient Dame with tire Wide MOI tn
and "Dress RefOrIn'' Hobby.

The Ancient Dame with tire Wide MOI th
and "Dress Reform" Hobby.
Virginia New Chronicle.]
II want to call your attention to
our system of dress REFORM" COM
menced all ancient dame with q wide
mouth, as she entered the managing
editors sanctum and threw her hat on
the table.
"Looks very pretty" murmured the
managing editcr, surveying the
Bloomer costume with a critical eve.
''See how free and easy everything
u.s." continued the woman, brandishiny
her arms and skipping around. ibid
you ever see anything to equal that"
"Don't think l ever did," replied
the managing editor, calmly. "I'm
prepared to say that never saw any,
thing anywhere that bore any resem.
blahce to it."
"Comiortable, pretty, accommodate
ting all the limbs and giving free
play to all the muscles. Notice that:"
'Don't real y see anything els"
clamored the admiring editor. "That
element seems to be the mainstay OF
the whole business"
Snow l want this paper to pick this
scheme up and make it popular
among the ladies of the nation. Are
you prepared to go into that branch
of philanthropy?'
ats little out of the line of nv
duties" responded the managing ed.
itor. I'll call in the religious editor.
tie knows all about such things"
81 see, ] see," muttered the relip-
'ous editor, as he took the show in at
a glance. "You keep those panta-
looms up with suspendcrs, reckon"
"That's just it," replied the DE-,
lighted reforner. "That is where the
costume approaches that of a man,
and therefore is perfectly comfortable"
"Supposc you bust = suspender,
what DO you propose to do about that?
asked the religious editor, dclicatelv. |
"Sew it up replied the woman,
promptly.
"But suppose you are On picnic
md there is no needle handv?"
81 don't k' ox," murmured the
meditatively.
"Tell me frankly" demanded the
eliyious editor sternly, ''do you
NOV how to fastcn suspender with
stick?"
"No, | DON'T" retortcd the woman.
"Have you ever seen woman who
loes:"
81 don't believe | ever have" re.
pone'ed the reformer.
81 supposed So" commented the
'ellgious editor. 81 thought so. Now,
mother thing. DO you know how to
ie a button on with IA striug:"
81 have never tried to-" stammered
he oman.
i wouldn't have believed YOU if
'ou said you had," continued the
eligious editor. You begin to see
where your dress reform will come
ut in case of accident But there is
'methlng else. You have suspend
rs for your pants and another pair
Or your socks. Now suppose YOU
'ere dressing in a hurry and those
uspenders got mixed, aud you put
he pair for the socks on the pants
nj the pants pair Oh the socks. And
oppose you holsted the socks up to
lie collar bone and you found your
at were beginning to Sip
~ cure brute!' howl.d the .
oman, as she made break for tie
DOT.
"That was rather tough, wasn't it,"
'ked the managing editor, regarding
ne disappearing figure with an emo
on of relief.
81 don't know replied the reli
Gus editor, looking IonginyIy at the
'ttom drawer of the managing edi-
RS desk. nderneath ali her
''ss reform she was strapped up like
mule IN blacksmith shop, and |
lew 1t. If she hadn't scattered on
at last question she would on the :,
'xt so it was onl y matter Ct tim
ow do you like that apple Jack | 81
" Won taSt,n1r on bD,r IH