The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1883-03-24
"No PLACE LIKE nOME:-

There are great many houses and
more families yet, but very few homes.
At least such homes as people like to
STAY iI. Ew q
The poet remarks, ''Be it ever SO
humble, there's no place like home"
But the truth IS, there are many places
liked better than home. Poets. aie apt
to sing about what they think should be
and ought to DO, but not so much about
what really is. s. ee esss ~
Home is about the last place some
husbands and fathers care to stay in.
Because tho chimney smokes, the chill
dren cry, the wife is out OF temper, the
mother-in-law is more so, the house is
dull, the old grudge keeps coming to the
surface, he can't smoke and there are too
many "chrocs to do.
f" Home" is the place where, in the
morning just before he goes down town,
she asks him for some noney, and he is
delighted to hear her and says, 'iWhy,
my dear, why don't you do SO oftener? I
do declare you wrong me thus. You do
indeedr'
" Home : is the place to which at early
eve she brings all the gincracks and
things she has bought On Fourteenth
street, which she hardly knows where to
put now she has them. AsfEss8rs<
/" Home F" is the place whers he can
swear as much as he pieascs when things
go wrong, in business outside, with men
whom it doesn't pay to swear before.
The place where can get mad and jump
right up and down if be chooses. Or SIT
in the corner by the "sncred hearth /
and grumble and growl and sniff and
snuff and sneer at all she says or does
from tea time till bed time
Home is the sweet retrea. to which
he comes at two o'clock in the morning
on lodge and other nights, with one
stale and extinguished cigar stump in his
mouth, two in his pockets and interiorly
full of vinous finds.
Home is the place where she says
to the caller she hates, ''How glad am
60 see yon.'' and the caller returns the
compliment with a lie of equal force and
weight.
Home is the place wherein BURGERS
break in and steal, and robbers rob, and
sneak thieves steal overcoats. from the
hall rack-where the help gets drunk
or mad and leaves suddenly.
Boys like home to eat in, to sleep in,
to shelter themselves from the rain in,
and so to when nobody else. will have
them around. Save on such occasions,
and when impelled by such wants, the
common boy had rather be anywhere
else than home; hanging around the cor
ners, loafing at the grocery, robbing
orchards, sailing, fishing, skating, riding
crawling under circus tents, being sick
with his first cigar, stoning cats, and
going home from church with the girls.
Girls do not like to stay at home any
more than boys do, and get away from
it at possible every opportunity and
make all sorts Of excuses to do so.
OF course, a mans family is great
comfort to him. Every one says it ought
to be, and the man himself, thinks it
ought to be.
And so does she think it ought to be
now that half dozen sons and daughters,
big and little, are hers to take care Of
Only the thought will pop into his
head at times, how free from care and
light'hearted, and what good time gen.
orally he had ere he was married man,
And She? She was quite down-hearted
yesterday when young lady friend
called, and in a momentary outburst re,
marked to her, "Don't You ever get
married." And the young lady, who is
secretly engaged, went pondering all the
|
way home,
| One trouble about home is that the
butcher knows where it is when he
would collect his bill, and SO does the
baker, the grocer, the milkman, the
gas man, the coal man, the tax gstherer
and the church beggar. e '.ft
| How the small boy does like to hear
one or the other of his parents say,
Nov, you 60 right straight home or
| I'll lick You within an inch OF your life, =
"Homen Is the place where the small
boy is spanked in his infancy and whaled
| in his youth, Often he thinks that there
| is "no place like homo ITO run away
| from, IN, Y, Graphic.
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A sailor dropped out of the rigging Of
| n shin. .af war Aomp tiftapn or tWentV