The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-09-17
COLLOQUY.


THE Zoo is a fine thing, isn't it, Bobf' inter
negatively remarked the Metropolitan police
superintendent to his privy counselor, Captain
Robert Campbell.
"You bet," emphatically affirmed the captain
Don't you know that it would be a little hard
for me to do much without the Zoo" continued
the superintendent. 'The Zoo" you know,
catches everybody-an classes go there
whenever you get a telegram au-
thorizing you to arrest a man, and il
you want to get any kind of a criminal, just go
to the Zoo. and you'll get 'em every time"
"Maybe we could get the Foreman murderers
there" was the bright thought which occurred to
the Captain.
"'Sh. don't give it away. The Zoo is a good
thing, L say. These bad people must have some
place of amusement, you know, and they go to
the Zoo. If there was no Zoo they might get to
going out IN society and attending church so.
Gals, and there's no telling how much mischief
might come of it. AS it is. these people are sat
listed to go to the Zoo, The Zoo, 1 tell you, is
the sine qua non to the police business"
81 guess it is" doubtfully remarked the Cap
tain.
"The Zoo is the metropolitan policeman's trap.
He catches all his game in it,"
"And it catches him, observed the Captain.
every well regulated police force ought to
have n Zoo. Mr.. Turnkey" directed the superin-
%tendent:. "f You need me, telephone for me at
the Zoo"
"Is it a profitable line7' was the question
"N'SA ~ 0hAAN AObOANOA AoPS oAeA 1SAN"
Mr.. Henning, of E Evansville, in a brief converse
ton relating to a railroad he was familiar with.
Eyes, all railroads are profitable" answered
Mr.. Henning.
"But the State Board of Equalization finds
that very-few of them are profitable" was sug-
geated.
There is no railroad in existence" continued
Mr.. Henning, (which cannot earn a profit on
the investment in the actual cost of its construc-
ton. The reason that there are no divl-
dends on the stock of most OF
the roads Is that they are bonded
for amounts several times larger than their
actual value, and the stock is heavily watered.
Bonds are thrown out on the ~rket-impr
ment bonds, equipment bonds, and all the other
various kinds of bonds known to the ingenuity
of the enterprisiug railroader. The bonds are
put on the market and sold for whatever can be
got for them, and where a road is bonded for
four or five times its value, as most of them are,
it's hardly reasonable TO expect a profit. There
is no road, however, that cannot earn a profit
on the money invested in the actual cost of con-
struction."
Gentlemen. Colonel Cyrus Josephus Dobbs is
approaching" quietly observed Colonel Edward
McDevitt to Colonel Benjamin Duweese House
and several other colonies who had congregated
on the postotfiee corner.
81 see," calmly remarked Colonel All Hop
Dooley, as, with cold, steel eye, he surveyed the
line of march and manifested not the least emo
ton.
"But isn't it a little early for dress paradeG"
inquired Colonel House, as he twined one leg
about the other and leaned against the corner of
the building-[uhe attltudinal description is
thrown in TO give picturesquesness TO the scene
81 believe it is" replied Col. Dooley; "the
matinee will not be out for fifteen minutes or
more"
"You will observe, gentlemen" continued the
Colonel, ''thau a change has come over the
MaloolIo cOuntenanoe of Col. Dobbs. From the
expression of his face he might be mistaken for
n "A n nfni nj ThA Gu1Nnfinn Aunnr in.rnnl nF n
colonel of leisure and luxury. His arms, in
their measured swing, seem rising to a bene-
dictOry altitude"
Gentlemen, II is plain" explained Col. Nc
Dewitt, THAT you DON'T understand that the
Colonel has been gravely impressed by the holy
order"
"And what's the holy Order2" inquired all
the colonies.
at is IA part of the history of the late military
enoampInent. 1t ranks as
General orders, No 4.
"May God bless you all.
"By order of
"GEN. GORGE F. MCGINNIS.
~. NJ. Paber, Chief of Staff"