The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1883-10-09
WEEKLY BAZOO.
TUESDAY. OCTOBER 8, 1883.
A NEW SECT.

A new sect known as the Abelians
has recently been formed in Western
Massachusetts,. There are now so
many sects that there is not enough
theology to be divided among them.
There was time when a new sects al
ways boosted of an entirely new and
strictly private system orthodoxy, but
the most that a new sect can now
claim is the possession of 81 me OF e
new article of belief or some one dis.
tinctive ceremony. The Abelians are
said to be in most respects orthodox
Congregationalists, and their distin-
gushing feature is total abstinence
from children in every form. No par
ent need apply for membership in the
Abelian denomination, and every
earnest Abelian regards children as a
form of worldiness quite inconsistent
with true religion.
The appearance of this new sect is
perhaps what might have been expect
ed in view of the modern develop.
naent of the small-boy. When we
consider the misery caused by the
small-boy, Including both the de
struction of property and the lacera-
ton of the adult heart and ear, it is no
wonder that IN organized movement
aiming at the total abolition of the
small-boy should manifest Itself.
Probably tire small-boy of Massachu-
sets, possessing as he does in an ex-
aggerated formal the peculiar quail
ties of meddlesome curiosity, self-es-
TEEN, sharpness in bargaining, and
immovable obstinacy which character
ize his ancestry, is of all species of
smalLboys the most Objectionable.
Possibly the growing fondness of the
small-boy for learning the cornet has
assumed larger proportions in Western
Massachusetts than elsewhere. At
any rate, Western Massachusetts is
the birthplace of the Abelians, and
We may be very sure that the found
ers of the sect have learned by hard
experience that small boys are the
worst evil of the age.
0stensibly the Abelians have no
object in view except that of benefit.
ting mankind by extirpating the race.
In their confession of faith the word
small-boy does not appear. They
simply rehearse the Calvinistis theory
that the world is an abominable place
and that life is synonymous with sin
and misery; and in view of these al
legged facts they assert that no more
children should be brought into the
world. This is undoubtedly logical
conclusion, and it IS difficult to see
how all consistent Calvinists can
avoid joining the Abelians. At the
same time, few people can be induced
to believe that Abelianism is anything |
more tina, revolt against the small
boy and that the grave declaration
that the world is not a fit place for the
human race means anything more
than that the small boy has become
intolerable and the small girl bur-
den ia Abelian eyes.
The new sect ought to grow rapidly
In Massachusetts,, where The prepon.
derance of unmarried women of ad-
vanced years is one of the distinguish.
ing features of the population. The
Abelian denomination will have no
more enthusiastic supporters than
the women who have lost all hope Of
husbands, and it will gather into ito
ranks thousands of middle-aged gentle
men whose neighbors are in the pos
session of small boys. The growth of
Abelianisn must, however, be purely
voluntary one, and when the attempt
is made AS it surely will be-to in.
Produce Abelianism into politics, the
sect will find its prosperity abruptly
checked. 1t is not in the nature Of