The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1883-07-06
WITTICISMS

What is the difference between a Da-
kota prairie and a Dakota Indian
One Is a daisy level and the other is a
lazy
When a man is welded to his own
ideas, he cannot be arrested for bigamy
unless he be shown that he has more
than one idea.
A Hartford chicken has diamond in
his crop. It's a little e%xtravagant. but
fowls can be fatted il you give them
carats enough.
Difference ofthe feelings of the col.
ored brother has had no influence in
one direction at least. 1t is still called
"niggerhead" tobacco.
"ln a | am recalled" announced a
young vocalist to a western audience,
81 shall sing M Grandmother's Clock"
She was not recalled.
A new song is entitle Brothers
hair was cut by Mother" 1t is a good
song for a singer to treat az mother did
brothers haircut it short.
A southern man who. during the
height of the craze, named his son
"Pinafore," hopes he'll die before the
boy gets big enough to lick him.
Josh Billings has this playful applica-
ton of see-saw: 81 saw a blind wood
sawyer. While none ever saw him see,
thousands have seen him saw"
A dead shark, measuring nine feet,
has been picked up on the Isle of
Shoals. Sharks of the twenty-per-cent.
per-annum persuasion can be picked up
anywhere.
A singular resemblance between a
bank cashier and a bullfrog has very
recently been discovered. When either
of them leaves the bank he generally
goes across the pond"
A western paper announces the fact
that an acrobat turned a summersault
on a locomotive smOkestack. That is
nothing. We know of an engineer
who turned on the steam.
Eyes" he said, 81 was absolutely as
tonished when Mr.. Goneworth asked
me to 90 and take a drink. Why, it 50
astonished me that l utterly lost my
presence of mind. l declined. sir"
Somebody substituted a pile of corn
cobs for the doughnuts on au Omaha
railway restaurant counter, and they
were about two-thirds eaten before
anybody discovered what had occur
red.
"Why, certainly, Ezra, certainly
Anybody can nswer a little question
like that. They are called 'enG men,
because they are the last persons the
wandering joke reaches in its earthly
pilgrimage.
SWELL" said the lady, whose husband
had run away with a school ma'am
IllClO . OIlN OOlOOlullOIg l. huOW VIZ
inside facts of this scandal, that's more
than those spiteful old maids across
the way do.
minister" said an old woman in thu
north, I'm going very fast and I'll sOOI
be in Judas BOSOM" "Hoots, toots ia
net" SAID the minister. "Ye mean Alb
raham's BOSOM" "Ah. minister, if "
had been as long a single woman as I'v'
been, We wouldn't be particular whose
bosom it was"
First dude, with an embarrassed
smile-"Say, Augustus, | really bellev'
I've broken a corset string. Have YOU
got an extra one with your" SeconC
dude, with an expression of horror
"Really why, Algernon, where coulC
you fix it if | had one? The gyurls arr
all looking at US, ye know.
"No, Joseph, the Steam Heating com
pany was not formed for the purpose
of heating steam. Steam is heated be
fore 1t is made-that is to say, whel
you heat the steam-no, when you
make the steam-no-well, confoun(
you, don't you know that steam Is hot
anyway, and doesn't have to be heateC
by a company
The census shows that there are SSS,
POS more men in this country than wo
men. Singular that in a large countr,
like this there are not enough wOmel
to go around.-Ex. There are womel
enough to go around. A great man.
do nothing else. What this country i
suffering for IS a species of woman
that wont go around so much.
Johnny and Tommy were playin.
out in the street where there was mucI
fast driving, and where they had bee
forbidden to go. Hello" said johnny
there a spanking team.
"Where?' replies Tommy. "Righ
across the street; it's your mother an,
mine, and we'd better cut sticks an,
get out of this" which they did, wit
their mothers after them.
The observant Philadelphia new
says; "a bill to prevent editors fror
printing free puffs for strawberry fes
1iyaIa nnJ ob,rob foroo &. k,lt