Morning journal and courier., 1883-10-20
RLEssrNas.

New Orleans has been particularly blessed during the past summer with good health and very little amateur acting. New Orleans Picayune. William Hicks, of San Jose, Cal, went out to dig vel, Hand struck valuable pocket of ore. As Emerson says, he-BilI-did better than he knew.-RochssterP Post-Exprsss.
 ssI am troubled with cold fses,, said Fen derson. tI always sleep in my stockings in winter" Glancing at Fenderson's number thirtesns, Foeg remarked, 'T should think you might do 1t easily. "-Boston Transcript. A social philosopher in one of the maga- zines bemoRns American extrayagance in dress, and insists that if it continues, 'the re- suit will be bankruptcy, save for the tailor and the miIliner." A survival of the fttest, as one may say.-Post-Express
 late novel marries of it's heroine under the prescription or the family physician as the only means of saving her from insanity. Tho diagnosis of the case was smlnently cor rect, for where everything else fails, mar riage is sure to bring the Iovesick back to their senses.-Commerical Advertiser. A certain country clergyman used to tell a good story of his going to new parish and asking parishioner what bis occupation was. 'sI am the village ratcatcher," the man re- piled, "and what are you l" The clergyman answered that he was the village parson.
 
 to observe that he supposed Eve must all get living somehow.''-Pan Mall Gazette The leader of Philadelphia theatre or chestra toward the close of last ssason was told that he. must cut down expenses. He cut of the man with the big drum, who was not getting the biggest salary of the lot. ''Why did you discharge that poor fellow" he was asked, instead of some of the otherss' 'Wsll, you see,,' was the reply, Che vas get- ting SO little thought he would not feel the loss of 1t much. Progress.
 Stopping at an Arkansas farmhouse, the good woman of the house prepared toddy for him. and told him 1t was made from 8 new barrel of whisky that had just arrived. week later he called st the same house again and asked for toddy. "We haven't drop," said the good woman. s'But when I was here only a week ago you had whole barrel of whisky" said he. 'sYes," said she, mournfulIy. s'But, mister, you can't expect one barrel of whisky to last forever in fam fly of seven children that hasn't got nary cow."-The Diary.
 A Nashville man received piece of we'd ding cake recently and foolishly ate 1t. It nearly killed him. and the doctors pumped him out and braeed him up and walked him around and at last saved his life, although they declared he had all the symptoms of p3emia, strychnine poisoning, normal tenn perature, Asiatic cholera, morphine poison ing, rapid pulse. and terrific respiration and several other awful things. However, an analysis of the cake showed that it contained no substances absolutely poisonous in them selves, but having been made by the bride, to the best of her ability and experience, the cake was enough to kill river and harbor bill. The man was very young or he would have known better, and would have saved the cake to kill tarantolas with.-SAn Francisco Argonaut.
 
 "why, child" said ma, ''you startls me
 To you sit near that boy;
 In all your actions you're toe free
 Which don't become maiden coy"
 GA boy always wished to be-
 Dear ma, and I'll pursue this plan;
 For as that can't be, said she,
 SIn get Rs near one as can"
 New York Journal.