Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1883-11-30
THE COLLEGE FKOLIC.

More tricks than all the college mad
caps ever dreamed of. You've never
had lark with us, and now old John
Sobersides you must go out for once"
''No bows, excuse me, | like fun
and frolic as well as the best of you,
but | can't see the fun in such ca
pers.
ooh, you old deacon, you, no fun
III it! You'd have died a-laughlng
the last time we were out. We kept
up such blare of our tin horns that
the townsfolk wished they were deaf.
We tore down signs, upset barber
poles, tipped over horseblocks, UNI
hinged gates, got the Prof's old horse
and painted him blue, and put a billy
goat in the chapel Tonight we've
got II programme to beat that all hol-
low"
"Well, " said John, there's enough
without me. But frankly, boys, |
don't see the fun in such FRANKS. "
Deacon John is afraid, said Ben
Raymond, with asneer, Deacon John
is afraid Of the dark, afraid of getting
caught. The fun in such frollc is
that therc'd be- the devil to pay if we
got caught ut it. SO it's too risky for
our good, old Deacon John, boys; we
must count him out. "
Call it fear, if you will, y said John
Strong, his eyes flashing. 81 shall
not JON you in this nights mischief. "
ooh, come along" SAID Sam. Wen
dell. 1--WE shall startle the burghers
tonight. We shall eclipse all the col
lege dcviItry ever played since Adam
was a freshman.
mo, Ben. says ! am afrald-let 1t
be So said John, with Il sharp glance
at Ben. Raymond, whose taunts had
stung him.
John Strong was the foremost scho-
lar of his class On the campus he
was rs full of spirits and sport as the
best of them Athletic, Injured to
physical excrtion, farm-brcd and
hardy, he was the champion in those
sports which made his class one of the
notable ones in the out door strlfes of
the colleges His popularity and his
superiority in the class room and field
games of the college, had, long before
the occasion alluded to, made him the
object of II rancOrous envy to the am
bilious Ben. Raymond.
"Why won't You go, John" asked
another, coaNlngly.
Because, said John, 81 have yet
to learn that there is anything smart,
or funny, or witty in playing such
tricks. The Jest lies, if it lies any
where, III making yourselves disagree
able The tricks you play are not
funny, not even ingenious, but they
put somebody to trouble to put to
rights what you have put wrong.
That is not fun. 1t is wanton mis-
chief. So, instead of fun it is nearer
To crime You IMPURE people who
have not injured you. That is coarse
vulgar lawlesSncsS, not fun. a saw
age or a hoodlum could do that kind
of mischief Just as WELL and make
himself a nuisance Just as etlcctually,
So far RS the mental superiority is
concerned, the lower the savage or the
more degraded the hoodlum the more
he would enjoy that kind of fun, and
think himself smart Just in proper
ton as he succeeded in annoying pGo-
pie"
Let us pray, said Ben. Raymond
snecringly. We've heard the first
cpistIc Of St. John"
Resides" continued John Strong
81 will say for the benefit of Ray
mond, since he has SO many taEntS
about courage, that consider it COW
ardly to 20 out at night and commit
injuries to peoples property that you
would not dare To do by day. 1t is sim
ply stIulking cowardice There isn't
an element of manliness nor of wit
about it.
Amen" mockingly CALCULATED
Ben. Raymond.
1.-The white livcred sneak will Just
as like as not give us away" said he
aS the party left the room of their
classmatc, Ben. Strong. But others
thought differently. They dec Jared
that John had spoken plainly to them,
hut that he was no informer.
That night was a wild one in the
city of III --. The Clamor of tin
horns was heard i'll one part of the
town accompanied by other sounds
which frightened women, harrasSed
the sick. who were tossing in beds of
pain, and chased sleep from the weary
laborers who needed all the repose of
night tob bear the labors Of the day. In
were awakened by the swapping of in
Vulnerable fire crackers in their yards
aud ON their doorsteps The next morn
nag an old omnibus was found bottom
side up ON the main walk leading to
the college 4 mule from neigh
boring pasture was found occupying
the room of the professor of mathe-
mates. An elligy of the professor of
ancient languages with hands full Of
mangel-wurzels labeled Greek roots
was found III the chair of that worthy
with Greek lexicon open before him.
A cabbage stump took the place of the
clapper 10 the college bell. The
signs in the business part of the town
were strangely misplaced. The bar
Der poles were set up in front of the
bank. The physicians signs were,
some of them, found in front of the
undertaker'S. The dentists sign of
Teeth Filled was hung in front of
the meat shop. The old cobbler's sign,
"Soles Mended" was suspended III
front of the residence of the leading
clergyman. The most prominent sur
geon found his sign in front of the
slaughter house. Under the sign of
all SliiiuSltt Ad" yer was PAsaN SA -
taken from the tanner, Hides Want
ed. The city scavenger's cart was
found in front of the newspaper office.
The residence of the member of the
Legislature was labeled ITO Let, while
the aldermen of the city were by the
same process of shifting of signs ad,
vertised, For Sale Cheap for Cash.
An eminent medical celebrity had his
Office sign supplemented with the
legend, Sure Death, while the most
prominent political orator had shis
office decorated with the signs,
champion Windmill", and Cheap
Gas, which had been taken from
their appropriate places and thus mis-
chievously bestowed.
This was not all. The fire-bell rung
out terrific alarm at the deadest hour
of the night. The firemen turned out