davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

No man was born hypocrite. II he
were born with this facility to dissemble
he would not be a hypacritc, II would te
his nature. aud hypocrise is one who
lives what he is not His religion is a
fraud, his business isa deception; he makes
love to woman for selfish purposes. and
solemnly promises TO love her, comfort her,
honor and keep her, IN sickness or 10
health. when. at the same time. he
simply means 70 use her ~ stepping.
stone for his social or business advance
ment.
Look about you, and see how many
such there are.
The world is full Of them.
The man who begins by wronging his
wife, il he is a consummate hypocrite,
always enlarges his field and practices
deception upon the world. After oil his
fine VOWS to the woman who gave up all
else for him, and clung TO him with arms
OF faith, he neglects her for "the boys.
For the balm OF her breath he gives her
the fumes Of whisky, and, to sum long
and bitter story, she sinks quickly into
the grave with a broken heart. The pit.
iless clods that fall upon her cofiin.lid are
no colder than his heart had been for
her.
Now that his wife has lain down to that
dreamless slumber, your nice man begins
to reform He is seen at church and
wears pious air. He takes great in
terest in the cause ofreligion, and, being
business man, sees "money in it." He
goes to church with great regularity, and
every days experience teaches him that ro-
ligion is good thing. He gives nickel
to the poor, announces in the paper that
he gave dollar, aud thus lendeth to the
Lord. lie is opposed to tippling, makes
an occasional speech against the accursed
cup, and, going home, mixes threeply
toddy for his larnyx strained in the cause
OF temperance.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22
AAliisy "a sleep

Tn. ability shown by Mr. 0lsis.o1e 10
,et through sucL = vast smoua, Of person.
Il ana ofY,cisl ~orl in limited time hes oc.
o..ioned no, li,,le surprise lo the minas
Of those who ara not acquainted wi,h h,s
mc,hods. His ability 10 do this is partly
due 10 nj. s,ceeaiusly mctho,lieai habits.
and also 10 the nhys,csl riii he pos..sses
being able 10 sleep unaes any and all cir.
oans,anccs This advantage is one which
he shares sith very few people, tor ,,rots.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

heard from usqnes.iouable authority
. story Of the Rev. Thomas h. Bsecher,
which is quite too good for private eircu'
lation. When he first went 10 Elm'ra,
good many years ago. be Was sometimes
free and easy 10 his theology. holding As
he still holds, that the life was more than
the creed. and tho department, more than
the dogma. one day woman called and
said she wanted 10 Join his church.
VERY well. " he said, ''come IN; glad to
see you
But" she said, Il shall have TO be i'm
mersed. I"
II can't duck You all over" he explain.
cd, mo dish big enough
"well." she repeated in troubled
frame Of mind, II must be immersed all
over. l have been reading the Bible and !
am sure the teaching is that we shall be
immersed all over"
Then go and join Brother Hodgsons
church." he suggestsd. "They have .
baptis.ry up there and there isntany vital
difference between us and the Baptists.
NO." said she, my friends are here in
your church; want to be with them
He pondered over it while, and then
said :"See here. suppose you go up and
see Brother Hodgson. and tell him to I'M
merse You SO that you can come and join
u.s."
SO she went and spoke after that man
ner
"Did Mr.. Beecher tell you to come here
for that?" asked the irate Hodgson ID
loud voice.
She affirmed that such was the sugges-
tion.
.Yery WE'LL" exclaimed the afironted
Baptist, getting warmer and warmer as he
thought OF the highly audacious PROPOSE
tion. "very welll very You go back
sud tell Beecher that he's mistaken II he
thinks thst am going to do his dirty
work"
The lady fed in terror. That evening
her husband called ppop the Rev. Hodgson
to demand satisfaction. mo SIR! ! won't
s,t down." he answered as he came into
the ministers presence; "did you speak OF
the immersion Of my wife as dirty work?
that is what / want to know and he
slammed on the table and doubled tho two
fingers Of his right hand as il to wiring the
clerical noso with them. Mr. Hodeson
hacked to the further end Of the room
near the door, explained that he meant no
offence: he merely meant, etc, ETC.; he did
not intend, etc, ETC.; in Pickwickien
sense, and for the dignity Of his denom'n-
,tiou, etc.. etc. but be would most happy
etc."
g. III be DANCED il you do. You'll
mol teaspoonful Of water on sny Of
ever puta syo,r indulge 10 ~, more
y family. An >i.,n'.."s WORK you
de~ay remarks ~ W., his ~
,l he slammed his hat sb won
red growl Of unsatisfed o. -
'me and carried all his 70. " o,o-
,echer's church dip or no dip, a. D. /
essed it, --Ne@ York letter. 10 Detroit
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

An IsyIscBLE ARGUMENT. NO sirp'
hotly exclaimed the man with Grape on
his hat. "You can't make me believe that
electricity travels faster than steami /
know better" And the man with Grape on
his hat wiped bis face aud glared st tho
conductor as though he expected that
fnnc'ionary to contradict him.
Upon what do you base your caicuia.
tions9' said man with red nose and
withering smile.
Look at IL blurted the first speaker
growing more and more excited. Look
at il for YOURSELF Here we have passed
eight telegraph poles in four hoursi IL
there . man here who cares 10 deny ~"
There wasn't. and the conductor spoke
very softly this next time he came around
for the tickets.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

IHE ALPHABET IN SENTENCE. For sev.
eral years the following sentence has
stood as the shortest into which ali thu
letters OF the alphabet could be- com.
pressed:
~ Gray: Pack with my boz five dozen
quills."
The above sentence contains thirty.
three letters A Utica gentleman recently
improved on it as follows, nsing only thir.
ty.two letters.
Quick. glad zephyrs watt my javelin
box"
George W. Pierce. Boston lawyer, has
nov forced the twenty-siY letters OF the
alphabet into sentence Of only thirty.
one letters, as follows:
n. Badger; Thy vixen jumps quick at
fowl"
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22
Its Just Ny Luck."

| ITS just my luck, mother. ! might
have known shouldn't get place, for all
it seemed as though | was sure OF it,
I'm the most unlucky boy in the world,
and l always was, ever since can remem-
Der. There's Osmond Gray, he got the
place just as he does everything. He is
no better scholar than am, but lie always
comes out ahead.
This was said in tone OF mingled i'm
patience and regret, as the speaker, q lad
Of fourteen summers, looked earnestly at
his mother. That sho was sadly disap.
pointed her face plainly revealed
III Mr.. Bemis has taken Osmond Gray
into bis counting house instead Of you, he
had reason for it. Ifyou fail as often as
you say you do. there is reason for it.
responded Mrs. Cowley. Il have been
afraid for good while, that you would
grow to be bad man."
That's the way you always talk mother.
1t seems as though you blame me for
everything that happens"
mo don't, my son; love you too
well for that. Tn afraid ! love you too
well for your own good"
mo. mother, you know you couldn't do
that Uncle Jack says we belong to an
unlucky family He says he alSsys had
bad luck, and suppose must expect to
have it,
Your uncle had his own luck, my son
He was his own enemy. You are not old
enough TO realize 1t, but lie reaps the re.
ward OF his own doings; he is kind heart
cd and generous; but he is apt to put of
till tomorrow what ought to be done TO
day. He is never quite roady to do today
anything that can be left for another time
Then. he has spent small fortune for
liquor and tobacco. and that is the secret
Of his luck. You are good deal like him
but il would break my heart to have you
grow up TO be such man as he il.
"Why. mother. ! thought you loved
Uncle Jackw exclaimed Ned.
II do love him. But know his faults,
and be knows them, too though he says
it's to late TO change. II you would ask
Mr.. Bemis why he gave the place in his
counting house to Osmond Grey. instead
OF yon, think he would tell you.
don't know how we can live, now my
health 10 20 poor. unless you can earn
some money somewhere.
Mr. Bemis was surprised Ut receiving q
call from Ned Cowley, and still more
when he was respectfully asked
The reason for his preference OF an under
clerk. II know it isl strange question
Tor mo to AJAX, " added the boy.
1T is strange; but as you asked it, /
will answer it." was the reply Until
within fortnight, intended to give the
place 10 You. Iknew you were 3 coed
scholar, . handsome writer, and quick
accountant. Then, knew that yonr
mother needed the help Of your was 9. 4
But heard some one say you were liks Z
your Uncle JACK, and began to watch /
roa. saw you drinks glass Of beer ut
The public house Of the corner. and one !
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

day l saw you pufiinga cigar That was
the way your uncle Jack began. and J
was afraid 10 trnst you.
Thank you, for telling me tins. Mr..
Belnis. And. despite the ircmor IN his
voice and tho blushes which burned upon
his cheeks, the boy did not shrink from
Ia. earnest gaze Of his companion. II
though, 1t was my hok, Now I've found
out il was my laaa. and III change my
habits. H. you will give me any Kind Of
work. III do The best can Sol
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

A young man Ut PottsvilIe. Pc. VA
serenading his girl at an open windov,
singing the familiar song; Come, love,
come. when abs came so quick ii made
bis head swim. She was leaning ont Of
the ~indoS, and misIaying OF losing her
balauee. she fell out onto his knee. knock.
ing bis nose on one side, mussins his shirt.
breaking bis guitar and two u her ribs.
No young man should sing that song with.
out baviog hammocs siraag up over bis
bead.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22
What Tine Is IT.

!, "Driver, what time is it2"
II WAS at Ell Paso and was on the ON
4 nibas going from the Santa Fe depot
i across the ford of the Bio Grande to the
e Mex lean Central station. The driver, .
u typical New Mexican, looked up as asked
7 the question. but shook his head.
- nwe are all broke up on time here" hs
4 "All broke mp. What kind OF time
said. sir?"
DO you wan, 'vou got!'
what kind hay. 'ats the ma''e'
oAll kinds Tbo,,. That va
Wifi us Tho - ''hes
ries somewhat, 'cordin' to gents wa,
yer kn Nv. bnt calls it--pulling out his
watch ap, looking at it--7:5O a. M but
The Santa Fe folks here runs their trains
On Jefferson CT. y time. 1t ought to be
34S by them, / ex. 'ect. But maybe, as
you're going by the Central road. yer
wants their time That's City Of Mexico
lime, aud it's now about s.. 30 / should say
But lots of gents wants Chicag go time. and
Keeps ter that. It's sommers abcnt 8 ;56 by Z
hem, L reckon. But ask most any Of
hese Western through gents over the
Pacific, and they'd probably
ell yer $50, for they hain't changed their
watches an give you Frisco time; though q
bout as many more might say $50, for al
hey're right through from the East and /,
AVE New York time" =
ut must be very puzzling and vexa.
ious," said .,
"But / can tell you. at the hotel we has
he wust times, continued the driver with u,
pathetic gesture, "a-calin' gents ter -
AXE the trains. Yer see, they leave word !,
the Office to be called a. D o'clock, or
alfpast, or maybe. We goes ter knock. i,
1 for EN- as nigh the time they say as we
an figger. But as often as anyway they ~
omes down madder'n snakes. Some's an !,
our too airly, an some gets left an has to u
y over all day, a.fumin about it, There's
0 gauge on it. We're all broke up.-
aioad Gazc9e.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

There was little disturbance over al
the North end the other afternoon, Ia
which two men fell afoul OF each other
aud pounded and clswed and bit each otl,
or in great shape, and took turns rolling
each other 10 the mud During the row
. little old man was seen In the crowd
rubbing his hands gleefulIy. slapping BIZ,
knees. aud encouraging both Of the com.
batants with equal praise and exhortations
to ''go and win" He seemed 10 be hay
ing splendid time, and looked quite sad
and detected when the fight suddenly
stopped upon rumor gaining ground
that policeman was coming. Some Of
the bystanders wondered at the little
old mans enjoyment, and after tho fght
was over one Of them said to him:
you seemed TO be having a nice time
Was tho man who licked the other your
SOM"
NO. said tie old man. mo relation
st ALL ds
"Was the man who got whipped an enc
my OF youn7' A9f
"So: ] never sav him before in IN life.
Whist was there 10 the Gght to make yon
isel 10 good tbenS" inquired the question.
er
We'll. replied the little old man,
"wben / was younger than 40, now, |
used 10 be director of church choir and
liked the business. aud anything that
takes me back 10 thai good OH time makes
me barpy Now ~ besn years sinos 20
had snything bring up my former chnirb
choir days - foreible and besuiifal as that
light did And smiling snew in good
humor the eurions little old maa wen,
away.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

A SurPigEsT REASON ia yerssp ths
man that grants pardons9" asked colored
preacher Of the attorney geueral OF Arkan'
sas.
"Whst do gov want Of pardonf' asked
the official,
ut is necessary. sab, afore ! can again
assume de sponsiblc duties oh dc profes
sion.
"Why is it necessary"
"Wasl, yer see. Use preacher and my
congregation turned me outen de chaseb,
wants pardon to show 'em dat is
nv dc gubenment Den kin
III .ok again"
sustained :. 70 turn you outf"
git my pulpit bA, '-tment. ssh
"What caused them 70 o..
"Cause | missed an appol.
VERY meagre grounds on when
vel you"
Yes sab, specially whom ! couldn't git
ar"
"What kept you awayS"
II was in jail sah."
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

A 'p'db'r a@ieing her IiilI- daughter
siis ipr m0uih with her dress sleeve.
ask'si her shat bandk.fcbisf Was for.
Said the little one, Wits t, shake st tbs
iadies on the street. Tbsi's What papa
does with his"
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1883-03-22

AZ tn 500 A day at home. Sam
~ ~ $~0 Piles worth IS free. Address
6rlHsox 4 Co.. Portland, Maine 4sly
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11

M. Mccartney returned last night from
a visit East.
Senator James G.. Fair and son arrived
in New York on the 9th inst.
We hear OF another ship making for the
marital port. She will be ballasted at
Salt Lake.
r. Sadler and Tom Haley left yesterday
by private conveyance for Hamilton. They
expected to return to-day.
Mr.. Andre has gone on a trip to the
valleys around attaching derelict ranchers.
A handy man is A. A. in Law or insurance.
On dit that a marriage long talked of
and specialized on in the upper crust OF
local Eureka society has at last been def
initely fixed, and that it will come off now,
sure pop.
Judge Toohy Of San Francisco formerly
resided in Utah. The Salt Lake Tribune
of the 30th nit. suggests that when he gets
through melting out justice to the GRIM
inals in San Francisco, that he return to
Utah and try his hand on the '~'polygs."
Salt Lake Tribune: Mr.. J. W. Kinsley.
formerly Of California, has taken editorial
charge of the Ogden Pilot. Mr.. Kinsley is
Grand Master Of the United Order of
Workmen, and is . gentleman who has
made many friends throughout the Terri
tories.
Henry f. johnson leaves for his old
home in Boston, Mass., tomorrow,
where he has a wife and two children.
Uncle Henry, as he is Familiarity called by
his numerous friends and acquaintance,
formerly lived three years in Phoebe, and
for the last seven has resided here. He is
a kind old gentleman, and in leaving takes
with him the best wishes OF this com
munity that he may have a safe and
pleasant journey home.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11
English View Of American Hotels.

II, says the London Telegraph, we turn
to the United States. we find q country in
which prevails a hotel system the most
elaborate and most extensive in the whole
world. A guest may obtain nearly all the
requirements in life in al American hotel.
There he can eat, and drink. and sleep,
wire telegraphic messages to the uttermost
ends OF the earth, read at Chicago by
means OF the perpetual tapeworm" ma
chine the quotations OF the Exchanges OF
London and Paris, have his hair cut, be
'barbered" and fixed" purchase tickets
for the play, read the papers by the cleo
trio light, have his visiting card
engraved, his boots polished and his
corns cut, borrow umbrellas and dress
suits by the day or night, and buy
cigars, chewing tobacco, railroad tickets,
comic publications, white kid gloves and
molasses candy. Essentials" and mon
essentials" alike are provided at fixed
prices, and no fees are nominally expect
ed. When the traveller pays his weekly
bill for board he does not find it supple
mented by a per day for attendance; and,
If the traveller bereally what the Americans
term a fright mean cuss," he may travel
from Cape Cod to the Golden Gate, and
from the Gulf Of Mexico to Washington
Territory, without, so far as his hotel bills
are concerned, disbursing a single cent
beyond the stipulated charge.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11

Scraps from the Notebook Of h
Sentineps Reporter.
Josiah Lean is mixing 'em in Sac
ramento.
The weather yesterday and last evening
was lovely.
Every Pecksniff in the country will re-
joice over Buffers defeat.
Divine service will be held in all the
churches to-day except the Methodist.
Many of the miners on Ruby Hill are
leaving for other localities to seek employ
ment.
The mining companies having all paid
off, tomorrow should be an excellent col
lection day.
Assessor Wallace gives notice this morn
ing that the taxes on mines are now due
and payable.
Have you seen the new styles Of over
coats at the Bazaar Clothing establishment ?
They're nobby.
Two, and perhaps three, of the Trustees
OF the Eureka Con. Company, will arrive
here Wednesday night.
P. Steler will leave to-day for San Fran
cisco for the purpose of purchasing an
extensive stock OF jewelry for the coming
holidays.
In the District Court yesterday p. N.
Hanson commenced suit against Chris.
PLAT for $410 IS, and a levy was made
by Deputy Sheriff Andre.
1t is stated that Gilmer, Salisbury 4 Co..
will soon put on q we'll equipped line Of
coaches between Helena and the Canadian
Pacific Railway. The route will take in
Fort Benton.
Quid nunc, while looking on, last even
ing, at q game of stone cuitan, saw two
flushes of the same suit come out in the
same deal something that may not occur
again for ], ZOO years.
Frank Riegelhuth opens his dancing
school for ladies and young misses next
Saturday. He invites parents whose
children intend joining to visit the class
at its opening. Frank is q first-class
teacher.
Sportsmen will remember that the shoot
ing tournament on Cariboo Hill takes
place to-day, and that no entrance fee will
be charged. The indications now are that
the weather will be fine, and if so, there
will be some sport.
The King Lear mine, adjoining the Paul
Pry, on Adams Hill, owned by II. s. Bull
lock aud John Poindexter, was yesterday
leased to George Henks, who will COM
mence work on the mine tomorrow. A
shaft has already been sunk to q depth Of
fifty feet.
It begins to look as though there ia
something in the Sharon-Hill contract
after all. Either that or q woman may
have Mysteries when she wants to. That
safe which wouldn't open suggests crook
edness. What is the matter with the safe,
any way?
The Salt Lake Tribune says: Our Ne
vada %neighbors are very anxious for a new
Eastern and Western railroad connection.
and are strongly in hopes the Union Pa
cific or Denver and Rio Grande will build
out from Salt Lake. There is a rich
country open to the first road into the
Silver State.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11

An exchange says: ''The rumor going
the rounds that John Mackay has some
notion of buying the Salt Lake Tribune for
Charley Goodwin and Pat Lannan has con-
siderable truth in it, Macksy sent out an
expert to examine the books of the con-
Germ to see if SIS, 900 was too much for it.
The expert reported that the paper was
well worth the money, having cleared
$685. 900 last year, and being reasonably
certain of earning $50, 900 per annum in
the future" The above is, as we have
reason to know, says the Enterprise, very
nearly correct in every particular. The
Judge gets the paper, and in getting il
gets 3 very good piece of property. All
his friends will rejoice in his good luck.
The SENTINEL certainly hopes this news
of the Judges luck is all true. He deserves
nothing less.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11
The knights TempIar.

George G. Perkins, Grand Commander
of the Knights Templar Of California, has
issued a circular addressed to the subordi.
nate communicates of the State, in which
the showing made by the committee and
officers who were connected with the Tri-
ennial Conclsve demonstration is pro-
nounced to be truly gratifying; and all
Templars of California as well as the mem
bers of the committee are to be congratu-
lated upon so successful q termination OF
one Of the grandest events in the history
of the order on this continent" The vote
placing the $1,000 surplus above all the
Conclave expenses in the Knight-Templar
drill fund is announced, and the recon-
mendation that all subordinate com
manderies meet on April 10, 1884, with the
Grand Commandery of the State, is ap-
proved.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11
A Chance.

II ever there was a town chuck full OF
prime marksmen with the shotgun it is
Eureka. No one Of the many hunters who
has slaughtered game in this neighborhood
this Fall but thinks he is chief, and that
il he misses 1t is not his fault. We have
probably more experts with the shotgun
in Eureka han are in any other town of
its size in the world, but the trouble with
some OF them is that their fine sight is
known only to themselves. There will be
a shooting tournament to-day. at which
they may cover themselves with glory by
simply letting their neighbors see what
they can do. Come now, toe the mark
and blaze away, or else quit talking.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11
Farewell Party.

Master Harry Clarke, son Of r. d.
Clarke of Secret Canyon. being about to
leave Eureka to be gone q year or SO with
his mother on a tour Of travel through the
Eastern States, Mrs. l. j. Wilson, at whose
house the young gentleman has been
living while attending school here. gave
him, Friday night, a very pleasant party.
Quite a number of the boys and girls Of
about his age were invited to attend, and
they made the Wilson domicile right
merry. They were served by the good
hostess with everything nice in the way of
refreshments, which, together with the
games they played, made the hours fly
until it was very late, though it seemed
yet early to the young m~erry-makers.
Master Harry's many friends wish him q
pleasant journey and safe return.
Eureka daily sentinel. [volume] (Eureka, Nev.) 1871-1887, 1883-11-11
A Soft Answer.

Twas past ~ at midnight when he rolled
nome and prepared to concoct some story
Ior'the iateness Of his return. She, how
ever, was awake, and with sharp-scented
nose detected an odor Of gin:
"whas smell is that, my dear ?" she re-
Gloves, my love-"
But the other odor, sir ?"
"Allspice, my sweet"
But smell something else."
IN, that's cinnamon"
but l am certain l smell something
that isn't spice at ALL"
,,oh' that's an apple l ate before I came
well, l should think" she replied,
.nas IL you'd just taken a good drink Of
Vlandy before you came in and eaten a
aan sandwich you would have had all the
INGREDIENTS necessary for a good mince
ne sighed as he dropped to sleep, and
rmured that he'd have done so il he
nsdnt been afraid of bad dreams.