Seattle daily post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, W.T. [Wash.]) 1881-1888, 1883-12-25
Nc WAS No sLOUCm.
Bat the Machinery Didn't work when
He Tried 10 Demonstrate the Fact.
IArkansaW Travelled

He Tried 20 Deaonstrate the Fact.
[Arkansaw Traveller
The other day Bill Higginsol, q
well.kuown character of tho White
Springs neighborhood, came to the
city In company with several young
ladies, TO one Of whom he was engag-
ed to be married. Bill was always
thirsting for noto,iety. He wanted
to be known by the leading men in
town, and to show the people Of his
community that, although born in
obscurity and reared on farm, he
can address men in familiar way.
While the young ladies were at the
hotel Bill went into wholesale store
and approached man who sat IN the
Office, said:
"Cap'n you can do me q big favor,
IL you will. I've got q lot OF gals in
town with me, an wanter show
'em that I amt no SLOUGH. l want
'em to 60 home an say Bill-that's
income to town en-. was knowed
by the big bugs. Now. l want to
make an agreement with you. I'll go
away, an putty soon I'll come arOun'
with the gals an come iu here, slap
You on the shoulder an say. Old
chap, how do you hold out?' Then
you slap me and say. Why Bill, old
boy. I'm glad to see you That will
be blowed all over my county, an
will be with money an character to
me, femme tell you"
The gentleman said that he did not
object to helping young fellow
along. and that the aspiring William
might come 10 and slap him, when
he would 20 through his part Of the
programme.
Bill, highly delighted with the ar.
rangement,, went to the hotel and
told the gals that be wanted them 10
take walk with him. As they walk
ed along oward the store Bill said:
Nov I'm going to show you,
Liza, that ynu amt going 10 marry
no SLOUGH. IN show you that your
own Bail is looked up to an liked in
this town, an that he Is on terms
with the best Of en-"
The girl laughed .self-complacent-
", and declared that 1t was nice to
marry man that want stranger
an a'slouch."
When they reached the store. Bill
conducted the ladies to the Office,
where q man sat looking over ac-
counts. He was not the maR with
| whom Bill had made the arrange
ments, but he did not recognize the
difference. Advancing, he struck
the man pretty heavy slap. and ex-
claimed:
Hello. old chap. how are you
holding out."
The gentleman sprang to his feet
ADD glarcd nj William, but William,
without embarrassment punched him
among the ribs and said: "Old chap,
howkare yous'
means'
No fool,n', old boy. Don't you
remember the agreemeatE he added
] in an undcrtone. :" It's ne; dom
you recognize the man you seed jes
now" and then, as he tsncied nc
saw q change Of countesance, hs
jolted the gentleman among the
truncatc ribs. aad exclaimed, How
are you holding outs"
i The gentleman hauled or will
an ink bottle and knocked Bill
down. The girls screamed and ran
away. and bili, as soon rs he wa
able TO regain his feet. skulked away
When he reached the hotel. with hi
face besmearedlwith ink, bis betroth
ed ran TO him, punched him In thu
side and said:
4 "He!lo. old chap. how are yo'
holding out."
"Qhat sctllesA with US. he sal,
sadly, regarding the girl with . lool
that spoke Of the melancholy yellow
: leaf. "Jest at the time ] need you
sympathiziu' the most, when OF,
. | fren's 60 back on me and knock m
, down. you jine the enemy. Go au
paw your hotel bill an 60 home"
.Ain't you goin' 10 pay my billy
mary q red.
Would you see me disgrace
! right in place where there's 50 man
folkss"
THAT Amt my look out. / ain
: q goin' TO pay nary red cent 10
{ you"
Il .Tben TIL take j, all back and
am sorry that I made fun of you
!, .Nutf said. Conc and put you
head on this here manly shoulder.