The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1883-12-26
CHANDLER AND ARNOLD.
Graphic Description of the Secretary's Per-
formance at the Arnold Lecture.


formanee at the Arnold Lecture.
Washington Correspondence Brooklyn Eagle.
Secretary Chandler advanced to the foot
lights and made twenty-minutes' address
on his own hook, and it was done with the
air with which he takes hand at an election
for primaries up in New Hampshire, with
dash of an experience meeting at a church
sociable. He began by declaring in a loud
and aggressive voice that he had enjoyed the
lecture very much-very much indeed; and
if there were any scientists in the audience
who would like to controvert the lecturer he
would just like them to speak up. Nobody
spoke up. Mr.. Arnold looked curiously at
New Hempshires eminent son as if to ask
him what he meant. Then the Secretary be-
gan to call on the various gentlemen on the
platform with him. He alluded jocularly to
Mr., Phelps as the gentleman who was figur-
ing out whether he or another man would be
the next President of the United States. Mr..
Phelps got up, made graceful allusion to
Mr.. Arnold, looked at the Secretary as if he
wanted to knock him down, and took
his seat 'Come, DIR. Loring," bawled
the Secretary, "you know all about agri-
culture--agricuIture and science are nearly
related, sin't theyP, and the Doctor looking
ready to faint, got up, and for want OF some
thing to do shook hands with Mr. Arnold.
Then the Secretary grabbed hold of Mr.. Hale.
Here's Mr.. Hale-eminentd divine-all know
him-now Mr.. Hale" etc., etc. Mr.. Hale
did the best he could under the circum-
stances. Then the Secretary spied Fred.
Douglass sitting away back in the audience.
He hopped up and shouted out, "Mr. Doug
lass-Mr. Douglass! let's hear from you!' At
first Douglass did not seem to hear him, but
after repeated nudgings from the people
! near him, he too arose and listened to the
Secretary shouting at him. Mr.. Chandler
conducted himself like the moderator at an
experience meeting, after this style: well,
Brother Jones tell us what the Lord has done
for you! Speak up, Brother Smith, and don t
be ashamed to love the Lord. Brother
Brown, can't you say word on the Lords
side?'
Then he proposed a vote of thanks-for a
paid lecture-to which nobody objected and
at which a suppressed roar of merriment
went around All the while he was strut
ting up and down the stage with an air of
saying, "Now, amt | a devil of fellow"
One distinguished old gentleman, while he
wiped the tears from his eyes as he shook
with laughter, said: II always knew Chand-
Ter had cheek, but upon my soul, l didn't
know What cheek meant until tonight"
Another stiff and starched public function
ary nearly went into Mysteries over it. 81
made up my mind 1 wouldn't laugh at the
fellow. l was ashamed of him. But it was
too comical. The first thing 1 knew, didn't
care a rap for Matthew Arnold's opinion of
the Presidents cabinet, and haven't laughed
so much in the last ten years."
The funniest part of all was Mr.. Arnold's
look of alarm and amazement and the silent
rage of the three gentlemen who formed
BACKGROUND for the bustin0 i'm
portance of the Secretary. As each
ones name was called in Mr.
Chandler's clap-you on-the-back style, he
looked murder and arson at the Secretary,
who returned the stony glare with wink of
good-fellowship. The whole town has been
in perfect gale of good humor ever since
We can't help laughing at the picture of
| ourselves and our public officers which Mr.
Arnold will carry away with him, and what
ever may be said about Chandler there is no
doubt, as Artemus Ward said about the kan
garoo, 'he's an amoosin' little cuss"