davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
Thursday, May IF, 1883,
QUEER BROKERS.


 As general rule brokers advertise for cus- tise for brokers. But there is a kind of brokerage carried on in Washington which in this respect, as well as some others, has no parallel in the world. In this business the customer always advertises for broker, and the broker never sdvertisss at all. h. deed, he would ruin his business if he did. So far as we know this is the only branch of business that would positively be injured by advertising. This is another illustration of the adage that there is no rule without ex- csption.
 citation of few of the advertisements inserted by customers anxious to penetrate the mysterious and modest retirement of these peculiar brokers will give the best in sight into the nature of their business. "A lady will give half of her salary for posi- ton as copyist." To whom will she give it? She does not know to any gentleman who sells his political influence. t'A reliable gentleman with the best political papers will pay $20O to anyone who will secure for him position of any kind in Washington" "A gentleman of experience will pay $1Oo for EN6ASAOAA A&ACSC are specimens of advertisements that are constantly appearing in the Washington pa Iers. They furnish significant comment upon the degradation to which the spells system has sunk the politics of the capital.
 As general thing it is probably true that those who are the most ready to sell their in fuene chave little or none to sell. These ad- vertisers are generally called upon by parties who claim to be influential. They generally insist upon retainer to insure the good faith of the applicant. This retainer will general ly be the last of the transaction. In some instances the broker will actually have friends in the department, which will give him the appearance of having influence. But there is no doubt that real inf uence is often sold and more often in Washington than any where else, because there is more occasion for it. Perhaps those who have real in- fuence to sell cannot be reached through the medium of advertisements. But the adver- tisements show what is commonly believed of Washington politicians. They do not differ very much from politicians any where else in the country except in their opportunities. The fact that real influence is sold enables people who have no influence to sell what they pretend is influence to those who are green enough to buy. No such brokerage would be possible in any other capital, be- cause no other is the center of great spoiIs system. Now that the new rules of compsti tive associations have been adopted if these advertisements diminish it will be by ne means the worst test of the efficiency with which they are put in practice. If the offices are really given to merit these advertisers will find if mt
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
EDITORIAL NOTEs.

The legislature of Illinois Is struggling proposed the city of Chicago and the adia- cent towns, which make up Cook county, would derive revenue of million and g half year instead of the paItry sum which they now realize from the sale of liquor.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

Providence claims the proud distinction of having more telephones in use to it's pop ulation than any other city in the world, but there are, we believe, at least two cities in Massachusetts which are better entitled to the distinction than Providence. Lowell stands first, Worcester next, and Providence third
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

The proof that Governor Butler was not in Massachusetts on the 2sth of February, the day on which his first veto was sent in, is complete. Witnesses have testified that he went from New York to Washington on the
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
COMPLETE TREATMEhT $1-

single dose of SanTord's Radical Cure iu- stanty relieves the most violent Sneezing Head Colds, clears the Head by magic stops watery dis charges from the Nose and Eyes, prevents Ringing Noises in the Head, cures Nervous Headache and subdues Chills and Fever In Chronic Catarrh 1t ceanses the nasal passages of foul mucus restores the senses of smell hearing when affected frees the head, throat and bronchial tubes ofen- sive matter eetens and pures the breath stops the cough and arrests the progress of Catarrh towards Consumption.
 One bottle Radical Cure, box Catarrhal Solvent and Sanfords Inhaler all in package of all drug- gists for $1. Ask for SANFoRDs RADICsL CURE. POTTER DRUG AND CHEMICAL Co.,, Boston
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

night of the 24th, arriving in the morning of the 18th. Sunday, and to his ha ving heen in Washington ou the 27th. Gener al Baum also makes affidavit that the govern br was in the office of internal revenue, in W Washington, on the 26th. These facts make t'ne veto null.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
GSaeatiOn.
$500 REWARD.

ETNHE above reWard will be paid to any number qf 4 graduates of any business school in Hew EMe- land who pass more rigid examination in tne Science of Accounts, PeHmanship and Business A. fairs at the end of three six months course tnan is passed by the graduates of
 Cargill's Business COlleges
 ma2a No. 33I Chapel Street.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

Now that the Pope has expressed his views concerning what the Irish ought and ought not to dc it will be interesting to see what effect his interference will have. In his cir cular to the Irish bishops he points out that while it is lawful for the Irish to seek redress for their grievances and to strive for their rights they should at the same time seek Gods justice and remember the wickedness of illegal means in furthering even just cause. It is, says the Pope, the duty ofthe clergy to curb the excited feelings of the people and to urge justice and moderation. The clergy are not permitted to depart from these rules and join and promote movements inconsistent with them Collections to relieve distress are permitted, but subscriptions to inhame popular passions are condemned. The clergy must hold aloof when it is plain that by such movements hatred and dissensions are aroused or distinguished persons insulted and when crimes and murders go uncensured and when patriotism is measured by the amount subscribed, for the people are thereby in timidated. Therefore the Parnell fund is disapproved and no clergyman should recom- mend subscriptions thereto or promote it.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
FINE WINES

or al gradeB. Tine Ieas-OOlOngs, JRpans, HysOn &c. Coffees-Mocha Java, Maracaibo. Java. Cigar quality the best. t@
 Gilbert s& Thompson, ma26 394 Chapel Street.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
HOOPS SARSAPARHA

Is a skilfully-prepared compound, concen- trated extract, 6y e process peculiarly our olrr, of the best remedies of the vegetable kingdom known to medical science as altera- lives, blood-purifers, diuretics, and tonics.
 Sold by all druggists. Price S1, or six for $5. c. I. HOOD &s CO, Lowell. Mass
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

BROWNS IRON BITTERs is n0t a drink and does not contain whiskey. It is the only preparation of Iron that causes no injurious ef- fects. Get the genuine. Don't be imposed on with limitations.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

The Director of Posts and Telegraphs dur ing the French national defence, M. Steen- aekers, has prepared complete history of the operations of that branch of the pro- visional government during the Franco-Rus.. sian war. One of it's most interesting chap ters describes the means to which he resort ed to communicate with Paris during the siege. Every device (which ingenuity could suggest was employed to get despatches through the German lines, and there were plenty of volunteers for the difficult and dan ssrous service whose devotion was equal to any test. Among the contrivances to secrete despatches were hollow cigars, cigarette pa- pers written on with invisible ink, shoe soies with concealed cavity, hollow umbrella ribs, artificial cavities in the messengers teeth. the handles of pocket-knives hoilowed out from the under side, piano tuners key, the ferrule of an ordinary walking stick, and so on through list of all conceivable devices. But the Germans met every scheme with such invincib1e scrutiny that not single messenger succeeded in reaching Paris, al though many came within hairs breadth of escaping detection.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
Failing!

That is what a great many people are doing. They don't know just what is the matter, but they have a combination of pains and aches, and each month they grow worse,
 The only sure remedy yet found is BROWNS IRON BITTERs, and this by rapid and thorough assimilation with the blood purifies and enriches it, and rich, strong blood flowing to every part of the system repairs the wasted tissues, drives out disease and gives health and strength,
 This is why BROWNS IRON BITTERs will cure kidney and liver diseases, consumption, rheumatism, neuralgia, dyspepsia, mala- ria, intermittent levers, &c.
 2os s. Paca St, Baltimore.
 Nov. 28, 1881.
 I was a great sufferer from
 Dyspepsia, and for several
 weeks could eat nothing and
 was growing weaker every
 day. 1 tried Browns Iron
 Bitters, and am happy to say
 now have good appetite,
 and am getting stronger.
 los, MCCAWLEY.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17
SCROFULA.

A remedy that can destroy the germs of Ecrofula, and when once settled has the pow CT to root it out, must be appreciated by those afflicted. The remarkable cures of young children and the more wonderful cures of those of middle age and late in life, as iI- lustrated bysour printed testimonials, prove Hoops SARsAPARILLA to be 8 reliable rem edy, containing remedial agents which do positively cure Scrofula and eradicate it from the blood.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

Professor William T. Harris is a philoso- pher but he takes a look occasionally at the practical side of things, and when he does he usually says something that is worth atten- tion. Thus, he says concerning the present era of rapid industrial progress that it shows a continual shifting of vacations, no vocation having any long lease of life. The new dis covery will make the trade learned to-day, after long and tedious apprenticeship, use less to morrow. Any peculiar knack which depends on manual dexterity may be render ed valueless by new application of machine ry. The practical education, therefore is not an education of the hand to skill, but of the brain to directive intelligence. The educated man can learn to direct 8 new machine in three weeks, while it requires three years to learn new manual labor. The hand, trained for twenty years at one kind of labor, cannot learn new work requiring different skill, because the muscles have become set and stiffsned into one form of action. An unedu- cated workman will be thrown aside to per. ish in an almshouse. Only the versatile in telligence is able to meet the demands of the age of productive industry.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

Among the good bills passed by the legis- lature of New York at it's late session and signed by the governor is G'ne providing that any person liable to highway ta shall be al- lowed in abatement thereof one dollar for every four trees set out in the highway ad- joining his premises the year pH evious to the demand for such abatement. he kinds of tree specified are 'any forest shade trees, fruit trees, ornamental trees, or any nut bearing trees of suitable size for shade trees,' and the prea cribed dis tancs between them is not less than seventy feet for elrns and not less than forty feet fer ornamental or fruit or maple or other for est trees This law ought to have good effect.
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

WARNER, N. H., Jan. 21, 1879.
 MFssRs. c. I. HOOD & Co.,, Lowell, Mass: Gentlemen-For ten years previous to the early part of 1877 had been constant suf- ferer from scrofulous ulcers CT sores, which had finally reduced me to ahelpIess condi- tion, as described in my letter to you in Sep tember of that year. The continued excel lent health which enables me to keep house for my aged father and to enjoy life, keeps alive my intense personal interest Tn Hoops SARsAPARILLA, and I cannot refrain from ex- pressing my gratitude for the permanent cure this wonderful medicine effected in my case nearly two years ago, while living in as being in an incurable condition. One thing before close. have recommended your Sarsaparilla to hundreds, and think more than thousand cases, and my faith in its lnVincibilfty in curing scrofula has be- come absolute by the wonderful cures it has eHeeted aside from my own. I trust you Will not be slow in making the merits of HOODS SARsAPARnLA known everywhere, for 1t is duty you owe to mankind. With best wishes remain very truly yours,
 SARAH c. WHITTIER,
Morning journal and courier., 1883-05-17

Much excitement prevails around Monti- cello, the hnna of Thomas JeffersQ n, over the preparations for the unveilIna; of the monument erected by the United States gov ernment to the memory of Jefferson. The ceremony will take place on the 4tIl of July next; throughout Virginia great efforts will be made to make the occasion memorable. The amount appropriated by Congress for the monument and for beautifyiRg the buri- al ground was 10000; of this sum only $7,0o0 has been expended by the commis- sion The monument and the handsome fence around it are now completed; the work remaining to be done is that of grad ing and turing the grounds. Jefferson left implicit instructions that if 8 mon ument should be erected to his memory it should be: s'On the grave plain die or cube of three feet, without any mouldings, surmounted by an obelisk of six feet height, each of single stone.' The style and di- mensions of the monument are as Jefferson prescribed, but the munifcence of art has been Iavished on the fence.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14
INCUBATION OF THE OSTRICH.

Some will sit throughout with the
most solicitous maternal instinct; others
manifest such anxiety that, when the
hen has been little late in taking her
morning turn upon the nest, the male
has gone out, and, hunting her up, has
kicked her to the nest in most ungen-
tlemanly manner. Some are very at.
fectionatc over their young, others the
reverse thus do individuals differ even
among ostriches. As rule the cock
bird forms the nest, sits the longest,
and takes the burden Of the work Of
Matching and rearing. Contrary to
what has been currently understood,
and what is still stated even in recent
colonial accounts, the cock bird sits at
night. In this peculiarity, the London
FifH thinks the hand Of providence
may be seen, for the worst enemies Of
the nest appear at night, and the cock,
being stronger and Drawer, is better
able to resist them; moreover, the same
authority concludes that, the feathers
Of the cock being black, night-sitting
does not expose him to the exhaustion
from the suns rays which would ensue
IL he sat during the day; while at the
same time the gray feathers Of the fe-
male are less conspicuous while she sits
during the day.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14
THE END OF OUR GREAT MEN.

The four great personages occupying
the most conspicuous places in the
worlds history, were Alexander, Han
nibal, Caesar, and Bonaparte.
ALExANDER,-after having climbed
the dizzy heights Of his ambition, and
with his temples bound with chaplets
dipped in the blood Of countless mil.
lions, looked down upon n conquered
world, and wept that there was not
another world for him to conquer-se,
a city on fire and died in a scene oi
dehauch.
HANNIBAL,-after having, TO the as
tonishmcnt and CONSERVATION Of Rome,
passed the Alps, and having put to
fight the armies Of the mistress Of the
world, and stripped three bushels oi
golden rings from the fingers Of her
slaughtered knights, and made her foun.
dations quake, fed from his country,
being hated by those who once exulting.
ly united his name to that Of their good,
and called him Hanni Baal, and died
at last, by poison administered by his
own hand, unlamented and unwept in a
foreign land.
CEsAR,-after having conquered
eight hundred cities, and dyeing his
garments in the blood Of one million oi
his foes-after having pursued to death
the only rival he had on earth, wa
miserably assassinated by those whom
he considered his nearest friends; and
in that very place, the attainment ol
which had been his greatest ambition.
BoSAPARTE,-whose mandates king:
and popes obeyed, after having filled
the earth with the terror Of his name
after having deluged Europe with tear.
Of blood, and the world with sackcloth,
closed his days in lonely Punishment
almost literally exiled from the world
yet where he could sometimes see hi
country's banner waving over the deep
but which could not bring him aid.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14
TEACH NE TO LIVE.

Teach me 10 live for self aud sin no more,
But use the time remaining 10 me yet;
Not mine own pleasures seeking as before,
Wasting no precious hours In vain regret.
Teach me 10 live, No idler let me be,
Bat In Thy service hand and heart employ
Prepared 10 do thy hidding ehesrfuliy;
BE this my highest and my hOliest Joy.
Teach me to live Ny daily cross 10 bear,
Nor murmur though bsnd beneath its load
Only be with me. Let me feel thee near;
Thy smile sheds gladness on the darkest road.
Teach me 10 live! and and my lie In thee,
Looking from earth and earthly things away;
Let me not falter, but untiringly
Press on and gain new strength and power each
day.
Teach me TO live! with kindly words for all;
Wearing no cold, repuls.vs brow Of gloon;
Waiting with cheerful patience, ill they call
Summons my spirit 70 her heavenly home.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14
BLUE EYES FoR BEAUTY.
Only Those Born With the Bright Iris abb
TO Bo nc the Tip Top OF style.

From the NJ. Loui. Poet. Di.psfek.
"To be in the fashion to-day, you
must have dark hair, blue eyes, not a
particle Of color and lips as red as the
cherry" Thus speaks a prominent
writer on the fashions. The artificial
production Of the black eye is a matter
Of every day occurrence. The best Of
friends occasionally do a little Of this
kind Of tinting for one another, but
from black or dark brown, or gray, or
hazel, or green to blue, is horse, that
Is to say an eye, Of another color, and
at this stage Of the new era in beauty il
does almost seem impossible that the
ingenuity Of man would be able to
accomplish the result. Such was the
opinion Of DIR. A. ID. Williams, an
oculist, to whom the subject was broach-
ed this morning by PoSf.Dispdfrh
reporter.
"There is no art by which the color.
Of the iris can be changed" said Drs
Williams. "The iris consists of cur
tain which is on the inside of the eve
and the back part Of which is supplied
with a pigment which varies in color,
as we see daily, and is in characteristic
harmony with the hair and complexion
Of the owner. The only change which
can be effected in the appearance Of
the eye IS accomplished by the use Of
belladonna. Ladies who have light
eyes, which they wish to darken, drop
into them solution of belladonna,
which has the effect Of largely dilating
the pupil. The light color Of the iris
is thus displaced by the deep black of
the pupil and the appearance of the eye
is greatly changed. Many ladies prac-
tice this habit, which is not harmful,
although it causes considerable discom-
fort. After lady has given her eyes
dose OF belladonna, its immediate ac-
tion is to dilate the pupils and they re-
main so, no matter how intense the
light may be Thus you see the ball.
room beauty who has increased her
charms in this way suffers considerably,
her eyes admitting such a quantity OF
brilliant light as. frequently to render
her almost blind for the time being"
"How long does this unnatural dila-
ton last ?"
Generally about a week. Where a
very weak solution has been employed
it will pass away in couple Of days
Very few ladies, however, who employ
belladonna. use the weaker solution"
But blue eyes are positively unat-
tainable ?''
eyes, sir. There is no process by
which the natural color of the iris can
be changed. The pigment cannot be
reached in any way that is now known
to science"
"Could not the l1dies wear blue eyes
over their brown ones?'
eyes, they could-in a story, not
otherwise. A healthy eye would not
allow Of the wearing Of false one over
it. There would not be room for it,
The artificial eye can only. be placed :
over one which has been shfunken by
disease. No; there is no way bywhich
the color of the eye can be changed,
none whatever"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14

b0-The volume or bulk Of carbonic
acid gas expired by healthy adult in
twenty-four hours, il is said to amount
to IS, 900 cubic inches, containing about
sir ounces Of solid carbon. This is at
the rate Of I37 pounds avoirdupois per
annum and taking the total popula-
tion of the globe at seven hundred and
sixty million, the amount of solid car.
bon or charcoal every year produced
by the human race, exceeds 46, 4S3,I43
tuns Adding to this all the carbon
produced by the combustion Of fires
and gas-lights, by the decay Of animal
and vegetable matter, the exhaltations
from springs, etc., there need be no
marvel rs to the source whence plants
derive their solid or woody MATERIAL
which is principally carbon, seeing
that their leaves are especially fitted
for the absorption Of carbonic and acid
gas from the surrounding atmosphere.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14
ToPNooDY.

Mrs. Topnoody had been reading
about the dynamite fends in foreign
countries, and, contrary to her usual
temper, she had become nervous, and
when, after supper, Mr.. Topnoody be.
gan to read some fresh news on the sub.
ject, she said, sharply:
"ropnoody, | wish you'd stop read
ing that stuff"
why, my dear?'
"Because il makes me nervous, and
begin to be afraid that they may CON-
mence in our country, maybe on this
very house"
"Pshaw, my dear, such fears are fool
ish. You ought to be drawer. You
are not usually so timid."
"But amt you afraid the wretches
will come this wayl"
"Not in the least, my dear"
"That's just like you men ; you never
think about your wives safety at all,
and believe you would be glad to see
a can Of dynamite explode right here
under this table, il you thought j:
wouldn't hurt you or ruin the furni-
ture."
"Oh, no, wouldn't, my dear"
"Don't you believe all these terrible
stories we hear every day ?"
ayes, most Of them"
"Then, why amt you afraidl"
"Because, love, I've been blown up
so often by my fond spouse that I think
dynamite would be an improvement
and long for a change"
Mr.. Topnoody lodged under the
table, and when he came out he remark
cd that he was glad his wife had re-
covered her usual spirits.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14

Sa-A land agent wanted Kentucky
farmer to emigrate to Dakota, as he
was not making n living in the old
Commonwealth. "What inducements
do you offer ?" asked <he farmer
ave have the richest lands, the finest
wheat, the best water, the fattest stock
and the biggest farms in the world"
EYES," doubtingly interrupted the far
mer. "Why, mani on one Of those
big farms they plow furrow five miles
long" "Whatl" "1'hey plow a fur
row five miles long" "That ends il,
stranger. Don't talk Dakota to me
It's all can do to plow one of these
little fifty.yard furrows here in Kain.
lucky, ard il it was FIVE miles long |
never would get to the end oft. Gee.
whoa, Buck git up there"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14

pO-"What has become Of the clothes
pins" is the newest household conun-
drum. That's easy, they get three
sheets in the wind and go of on a
tear.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1883-07-14

p1-It is the favor Of man which
gives the beauty and comeliness to wo-
man, as the stream glitters no longer
when the sun ceaseth to shine.