Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1883-02-10
THE CAMP FIRE.
The Army Hummer. Where He Came
From ANA How me Operated.


From ANA How me Operated.
The following paper on 'The Army
hummer Was rea Oy Capt. w. +. Atkln-
son at recent ca mp tire OF FairDanks
post: IA .tt
am usually selected by my soldier
friends to answer question or write an
essay upon something know very little
about, ana as they have followed up this
plan tonight, ind myself down for the
army hummer.
| have heard there was such an ami
NAL roaming around the outskirts, and
even in the ranks of the very wicked
army of the east. l belonged, all during
the war, to the western army, composed
exclusively of modest Christian young
gentleman, and with us hummer Of
any kind was thing to be abhOrred.
Often when hog had come into camp
and skinned himself | have heard our
boys, after praying over the remains,
wonder if 1t could be true that soldiers
in the east actually went and stole pigs
from the poor citizens. We were as
sured such things did happen, but could
hardly believe it. Our chaplains used
to tell us 1t was because in the army of
the east there was large number of
wicked men from Massachusetts,, while
prairies and bounding pillows of the
west and northwest, where mems souls
are pure as the air they breathe. The
chaplain must have been right, for there
is no record of Michigan man being
caught stealing. remember once when
the 22d Michigan was near Lexington,
Kentucky, hearing that Sheridan's cav
airy were in the Shenandoah valley and
were taking from the people poultry of
all kinds. | can see now the angelic ex-
preston on our good chaplain's face, as
he stood by camp fire, with freshly
picked turkey leg in one hand and a dish
of apple butter in the other, ard thanked
God that we were not like those wicked
cavalry, but confined ourselves to what
the Lord and the cOmmissary provided.
1t was beautiful sight, and, so that no
improper thought may enter your heads
as to how the good man got the turkey
bone and the apple butter, I'll tell you a
secret that has been long kept hidden by
the western men. We were so good the
angels mistOok us for the lost tribes,
and things came always to us as did the
mama to the children Of Israel in the
night, no one ever knew how. We
used them and were thankful.
Some strange stories have been told
me since 1t was announced that / would
help write the history of the war, by a
strictly truthful account of the hummer;
but have been careful to forget those
not properly vOuched for. You may not
want to believe it, but qave the proof
that our gallant president, comrade
Hampton, tried once to embrace SET
ting hen, intending to eiope with her,
and would have done so If an old lady
armed with a broomstick informed him
that hens were not the kind1 of females
God intended man to take to his bosom,
and drove him off the ranch as a punish
ment for his bad taste. He was New
York man at that time, and am happy
to say has reformed since he moved to
Michigan, where he has had chance to
see how truly good men behave them
selves.
No one would ever suspect that COM
rade Norton, with his sanity face and
fatherly ways, was ever guilty OF entic-
ing innocent young turkeys or chickens
from their rOOsts, but it is told, as a SOL
emn fact, by the men who were with
him, that his manners were so taking
That turkeys and pigs and tender young hens.
Apple butter in jars potatoes in bins
In the dead Of the night without even a light,
Would steal to his tent just to gaze in his
eyes.
Did they ever go back? know I'll surprise
Every man when said that the horrid old sin
am told, took them in and eat them for din
ner. MIR
If it wasn't sworn to l would hardly
believe story told me of one of our cav
airy comrades. He Is one of those men
who always Obeyed orders. and besides is
very patriotic. He was on picket guard
somewhere in Virginia and had orders to
shoot anything that attempted to pass
his beat without the cOuntersign. About
Z o'clock In the morning firing was heard
from his direction and the officer of the
day gallOped out to see what was the
matter. There he found our worthy
friend banging away as fast as he could
load, and every time bringing down a
sheep. what in thunder are you shoot
ing those sheep fOr?" asked the officer.
"Obeying orders, sir. challenged them
sign, and when / asked them If they
were for the Union. and the big fellow at
the head said 'bahp and the rest joined
in, l couldn't stand 1t to have fun made
of our holy cause, so dropped few of
them, and I'll bet when our boys get
through frying them they'll know better
than to bah ut the Union again."
That man had lived in Ireland, and he
was converting the sheep after the plan
England uses to make the Irish loyal, by
killing them off. gtts
From what can learn of the bummers
they were among the best Of the army,
the active spirits who could not stand
the plodding, tedious ways of regular
warfare; they pushed always ahead and
forced circumstances to suit their views
They took the chances Of being killed
rafher than ha in innarance of the conn: