The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1883-01-24


| good for eighteen hours Of wide-swaked.
1 ness Observation-Disclosures hours Of
the very most uncomfortable wide.
awakedness that you ever experienced
| in your life. A stranger died on our
hands one time. and we vacated and
left him in our room over night Did
that stranger wait for the general judg-
mentP No, sir; he got up at five the
next morning in the most prompt and
transformations way. ! knew he would;
knew 1t mighty well. He collected
bis life insurance, and lived happy ever
after for there was plenty OF proof as
TO the perfect squareness OF his death.
"Well, VIC were gradually fading
away toward better land, on account
Of our daily loss OF sleep: 80 we finally
had the expert up again, and he ran o
wire to the outside Of our door, and
placed a switch there, whereby Thomas,
the butler, could take oil and put on the
arm; but Thomas always made ono
,itt mistake he switched the alarm of
at night when he went to bed, and
switched II on again at daybrcak In the
morning, just in time for the cook to
open the kitchen door, and enable that
going TO slam us across the house, some
times breaking window with one or
the other Of us. At the end Of a week
we recognized that this switch business
was dclusion and q snare. We also
di covered that band OF burglars had
been lodging In the house the whole
time-not exactly to steal. for thore
wasn't much left now. but 10 hide from
the police. for they were hot pressed.
and they shrcwdiy judged that the de.
fectivos would never think Of tribe OF
burglars taking sanctuary In n house
VIGOROUSLY projected by tho most i'm
posing and elaborate burglar alarm In
America.
"Sent down for the expert again, and
this time no struck q most dazzling idea
he fixed the thing so that opening the
kitchen door would take of the alarm.
1t was noble idea, and he charged &C
cordingly. But you already foresee the
result. switched on the alarm every
night ut bedtime, no longer trusting to
Thomas frail memory; and as son as
/ the lights were out the burglars walked
in at the kitchen door. thus taking the
alarm of without waiting for tho cook
10 do 1t in the morning. You see how
aggravatingly We were situated. For
months we couldn't have any company.
Not n spare bed in the house; all occu-
p cd by burglars.
FINALLY, got up q cure Of my own.
The expert answered the call, and ran
another underground wire to the stable,
and established n switch there. so that
the coachman could put on and take of
the alarm. That worked iirst.ratc, and
n season Of peace ensued. during which
we got to inv ting company once more
and enjoying life.
"Bul by-and-by the irrcprossiblc
alarm invented q new kink. One win
ters night we were flung out Of bed by
the sudden music Of that awful gong,
and when we hObbicd to tho annuncia-
tor, turned up the gas and saw the word
Nursery exposed, Mrs. McWiliams
tainted dead away, and came precious
near doing the same thing myself. !
seized my shotgun and stood timing
the coachman whilst that appalling buzz
King went on. ! knew that his gong
had flung him out, TOO, and TINT he
would be along with his gun MS soon as
he could jump into his clothes. When
judged that tho time was ripe ] crcpt
into the room next tho nursery. glanced
through the window, and saw the dim
outline of the coachman In tho yard be-
low, standing at prcscnt-arms and
waiting for chance. Then I hoped
into tho nursery and fired. and in tho
same instant the coachman fired at the
rcd fash of my gun. Both OF us were
successful crippled nurse and he
shot of all my back hair. We turned
up tho gas and tolephoned for a sur
gcon. There was not a sign of burg
lar. and no window had been raised.
One glass was absent, but that was
where the coachman's charge had come
through. Here was iino mys'ery-a
burglar alarm going OF at midnight
OF its own accord, and not burglar in
the nc ghborhood.
Tho expert answered tho usual call,
and explained that IL was false
alaim.' Said 1t was easily fixed. So
he overhauled tho nursery window,
charged n remunerative figure for It,
and dopnrted.
"What we suffered from false alarms
for the mott three years no photographic
pen can describe. During the first few
months always flew with my gun to
the room indicated, and the coachman
sailed forth with his battery, 10 support
me. But there was never anything to
windows all tight and secure.
We always sent down for the expert
next day, and he fixed those par.
tioular windows so they would keep
quiet q week or so, and always re-
mcmbercd TO send us q bill about like
this:
WWuo,.'''''''..' ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. S2.1b
Mipp,lo....;.. :..,...... .,..,,.,...... rs
,n,Mo houib IuDOr.',. ...'..,., .,.....,.... LOO
wax ..,.... Observation-Disclosures. ~
t.fVsss. IN