National Republican., 1883-02-26

A NEW York exchange heads an article;
"What do we do with paper2" You probably
have 1t extended.
"TRAMPs are beginning TO work north,"
says the Boston Post Its about time they began 10
work somewhere.
WHAT most astonishes the foreigner in
Kentucky Is that yaller should be spelled yellow.
| -COuicT-JOun1i.
OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES has taken the
pledge. That Is to say, he has promised himself
Inc will not lecture any moro.
BURGLAR in Brooklyn has shot two
det, ctves. He must have been an exceedingly
cnterprislng thief to get near pair Of dotect-
| ives.
IT is said that the two elements much
needed by the south and most conducive to q
| higher civilization arc "plug" hats and sus.
penders.
IN Tippah county, Miss, the sheriff has .
dog on which there are executions and attach
ments to the amount Of $500. This may be styled
| u valuable animal
A YANKEE engineer offers to straighten up
the leaning tower Of Pisa for 100000. Such an
offer is absurd. new one could be built for half
| that amount Of money.
REV. ANsoN G. CHESTER lectured at Syra-
ouse the other night ON the Moral Side Of Verb"
Il a.
tancc, and should be reported verbatim.
THE report that Oscar Wilde is to make his
first appearance ON the stage as Romeo is not 80.
This was the original intention, but It has been
found impossible to get anybody to play Juliet
THE establishment of memorial tablet to
| Prof Morse In the house in Rome which ho occu.
| pied in 1880 probably indicates that the building
will be preserved by the Roman municipality in
memory of the great electrician.
The Eufaula (Ala.) Times says a lot Of rab-
bits, crowded on q raft Of drinwood, loated down
the river the other day. The food had surrounded
| the rablts and run them on to the raft and they
were journeyng to the distant gulf.
The Rev. DIR. Morgan Dix calls the advo-
| Gates of woman suffrage "clamorous evangelists
| of spurious womAnhood." 1t will be observed
| that the reverend doctor allows Miss Anthony to
get well out to sea before making this remark.
TWENTY years after an execution had been
issued against Thomas Cushing, of Now York, that
execution was served few day ago and Thomas
was placed in jail In court he claimed that the
plaintiff and plaintiffs attorney had been dead for
years. He was discharged.
DURING the last thirty years the California
quicksilver mines have produced 10O,222, ,267
pounds, of which 67, ,397 800 pounds were exported
California produces ne-half of all the quicksilver
in use throughout the world. The Rothschilds
control the Auslrans and Spanish mines.
AN English nobleman who died lately left
instructions by will that his funeral should not
cost more than G5O my fathers" he wrote,
"cost $500 which consider q shameful waste OF
money" The heirs will see that the funeral ex-
pcnses are kept within the limits, never fear.
AT Monte Carlo, on New Years day, o
player was sitting at a roulette table. Up to him
| came a friend very excited, who said Have you
| ard ba Ca nhatta dipH last fuht p
"what timer" said the player. "At midnight"
Then / will put hye louis on the twelve this
coupr
SERGEANT BALLANTINE on one occasion
had lady client named Tickle. Mr.. Ballantine
said to the Judge, Tickle, my client, my lord"-
Here he was interrupted by the judge saying,
"Tickle her yourself, my learned BROTHER Bal
| lantine, who is great wit, looked glum for a
whole day.
AT an elaborate supper given in Memphis
live doves and quails were placed in the six grand
center cakes, and when they were cut open the
birds Auttered their wings and few about the
room. 1t must have been very pretty, no doubt,
but we don't believe many of the guests cared to
eat the cake.
THE most consderate woman in the world
lives In Boston. The other day while carrying a
dog in her arms she fell violently on the ice on
Beacon street. and was heard apologizlng to the
canine for her cHrelessness When Henry Bergh
hears of this he will shed tears of Joy as big as
horse chestnuts.
The governor general Of India has finally
succeeded in stamping out the suttee. The
"suttee" Is the immoaton of q widow on her
husbands funeral pyre. This action Of the gov
ernor general will throw a fresh crop Of widows
| on the market. India under the British rule
steadily deterioratng.
| IL 1, r. IoI,
patient who was suffering from chronic sore
throat, that the only sure cure for It was beard.
"Thats Of no interest to me-" she replied. i've
got no beard" "True," he replied gallantly:
"but you can use mine often as you want to. !"
They were married few months later.
A MASSACHUSETTS man is curing himself Of
dyspepsia by ten days fast At the end Of five
days he sa i'd he felt full of energy had no sense
of hunger aud expected to taste nothing until his
time was up. There is no manner of doubt that
fastlng will cure dyspepsia, or any other disease
II the sufferer will only refrain from eating LONG
enough.
A VAST amount of cheap fish Is annually
was, ed in England because the people ignorantlY
suppose It is not fit to eat and won't buy It, ono
of the useful features of the coming international
fisheries exhibition at London will be daily
demonstrations by the school of cookery that these
so-caled inferior sorts of fish sayory and nutri
tious Visitors will have an opportunity OF see
ing them prepared and cooked and OF proving
their quality by eating them on the spot
A KANSAS thief impersonated ghost and
succeeded In robbing large number OF dwelling
by frightening the servants while the iamilie
were absent He was finally caught and place.
under arrest "A crowd of indignant citizens as
? sembled at the Jail and demanded Of the sheri
that the alleged ghost be handed over to them TO
, punishment. He refused this demand, when th
leader of the gang shot him through the heart
The sheriff then gave up the ghost. great man!
8 curious things happen In the west, II one cal
believe the eastern papers.
A NEW candidate for pugilistic honors ha
arisen. His name is Harmoni he is seven fec
two inches tall, comes from Utah, ana Is WOO
5 chopper. He beats the Niobrara Triplet by on
! vote, the citizens Of his native wilds permitting
{ him TO vote four times In meetings OF all kinds
D He has, however never fought real prize fight
$ He had glove fight with the Montana Terror, II
| Bozeman about five years ago, and uuinentionall!
| killed his opponents brother in New York by
| wild blow. He is now engaged In selling his cabl
net photographs for burglar alarms, but desires +
: engage in prize. fighting as his health is failing
= and he needs light exercise.
' THE Hour has these truthful If not owe
q | complimentary, words to say; apart from hl
musical gin, Richard Wagner was man Of yer
common mold. Dellcacy of feeling, the grace
manner which poetry should beget he had non
A year ago he spent the winter at Palermo, medl
l. lating his score of Parsifal' and a great banuuC