Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1882-08-30
NEWSPAPER WAlFS,

Dodoridge wrote about "high, eternal
noon as one of the joys OF heaven. He
| could not mean this noon, but some other
| noon, IN the winter. New Orleans Picay-
| une.
a New York State man, who recently
| tried flying machine of his own inven.
tion, had no advice to those who crowded
around him. All he said was, "Work in
burned fool somewhere on my tomb
stone. "-[Boston Herald.
An exchange says: GA new fashion
which has been set at Newport, and ought
to become popular everywhere, is the aboli-
tion of the check rein." We always
thought all the fashion at Newport was due
to the check reign Lowell Citizen.
A small stream in this county, which
some years ago was alive with tadpeles and
mud turtles, has been permitted to Try up,
just because our members of Congress re.
fused to ask an appropriation of $780, 900
to improve it Norristown Herald
Travellers tellusthat the word Esquire, !"
tackled on to everybody indiscriminltely in
this country who has no professional title
actually means something where l. is at
homo in England. For instance,f 6s nsds
Mercury comes to this office a1dressed1
g The Picayune, Esq. Pew Iorls
Picayune.
Hibernian-" 1t i..>ot too much
that the courage seaman in tiIb7-.l7l!
eorhoody Of a machine whose localit he is
ignorant of, and whose contact wnuld be
the signal of his destruction, ranks higher
than the bravery on which the old methods
OF giving battle made demand. - london
Daily Telegraph.
In suburban town lives relttive of
the immortal Mrs. Malaprop. Taa other
evening caller asked if Mr.. II was at
home, and could be seen? ct think not, y
was the reply 81 believe my husband
has expired for the night. '-[Bostdn Tran
script.
You ask me why don't marry girl
Whose moneyd keep me out of the wtirl
OF lie OF toll. Because--Pll conflde-
greatly prefer to be not the J ride,
But the husband OF the girl marry
In marriage, YOU know, my dear Harry
The wife's subsection is the surest way
The only, in fact, some people would say
For husband and wife that state to attain
Where equal they are will equal remain.
boston Advertiser.
A Sunday school Superintendent in an
Illinois town exhorted so eloquently against
circus-going that when the next show came
along all the children stayed home of their
own accord, and no one would have found
out that the Superintendent was there if
the minister had not mistaken it for re.
vival and dropped into the tent just as the
elephants were starting around. Il Philadel-
phia News.
heard an anecdote at Oxford of por-
ter encountering on his rounds two under,
graduates who vera wifhnnt thair c,ouns
or out of bounds. or out of hours. He
challenged one Your name and college ?"
They were given. Turning to the other {:
"And pray, sir, what might your name
be" Julius Caesar" was the reply.
What, sir, do you mean to say your name
is julius Cesar ?" Sir, you did not
ask me what it is, but what it might be. Z"
NV. II. Harrison's "reminiscences.
Takes the Cake-Some time ago horse
that had become unfit for duty was sold by
Chief Benedict to a baker on the chill"
One day the horse was standing on Halsey
street, near Fire Department headquarters,
when the bell struck for Box No. CT, which
is on the corner of Springfield avenue and
William street, The horse pricked up his
ears and apparently counted the box, for
he watched until the first round was ruug,
and then off he started at mad gallop
down Halsey street, up Market street and
Springfield avenue straight to the box.
Nothing could stop him the baker wagon
was demolished, the bread and cake scat
tered along the streets, but on he went
until the fire was reached. He had be.
lenged to No. 8 steamer, and was used to
answering that box.-[N Newark Daily AID.
vertiser.