Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1882-10-19
SpOOpendyke as a Farmer.

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Spoopendyke as Farmer.
''This." said Mr.. Spoopendyke, as
he gazed around on his new aeauisi.
ton Of six acres this, my dear, is
what ! hare alws,s santed. A farm
and a farmers life are the highways
to happiness. Mrs. Spoopendyke,
don't you think so?'' -,
'sIt's perfectly lovely" rejoined
Mrs. Spoopendyke. II was born on
ia farm, and was always healthy,
though l had to go good ways for
water" {
'I'll fix that, my DEAR returned
Mr.. Spoopendyke. I'll bring the
water. Now, where are my agricul-
tura reports? ] must plant right
off if we are going to have crops, and
when they're ripe Wen take them to
Market ......+..-
Il see the report says you must
give your hen chopped turnip once in
while,'' said Mrs. Spoopendyke, put
ting her thumb on the paragraph.
"Either that Or cabbages, re-
turned her husband. 81 don't know
whether We'll have cabbages enough"
he continued, masingly.e 81. 81 e# I.
stYou might have less buckwheat, -
suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke. 81
should think, though, that two acres
would be enough for one hen, and if
it isn't you can buy load now and
then from the neighbors.
"I'll think that over" replied Mr..
spoopendyke. "Here's one thing
certain I don't understand. It says
we should test few seeds before
planting to make sure they will ger
inmate, but it don't say how to do
it, > ::
maybe it means to boil Them"
suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke, cor
perhaps you"
''Oh, perhaps you think it means
to crack 'em with an axe to see if
they are hard. I s'pose you We got
an idea you stick straws into 'em to
see If they're done! Well, you don't;
You put acid on 'em. I'll get some
acid and drop 'em in, and if it dis
colors 'em they are no good, and if it
don't they're all right. 1 think we
ought to have some weevil for the
pig"
Il don't know where you are 60
ing to plant it," said Mrs. Spoepen-
dyke, s'unles<it win grow with buck
wheat or onie S. You can't put it
in with the cabbage, because the pig
and hen would fight.''
''Don't YOU know what wcevil is s?''
demanded Mr.. Spoopendyke, glaring
at his wife. s'Got notion it's some
kind of wild weed for the pig to
smoke, haven't you? Imagine it's
gilt-edged note paper with mono
gram for him 70 write on, don't you?
Well, it isn't a swallow-tail coat or a
plug hat for him to go to church in,
neither! You don't plant weevil,
Mrs. Spoopendyke, any more than
you do soap, Or clothes-pins, Or stair
rods. You buy it in barrels, and I'll
order some."5C = 8
i think we ought to have some
lace curtains for the front windows, ,,
suggested Mrs. Spoopendyke, sanx-
ious to change the conversation.
''Yas, and we want folding bed
stead for the COW, and we've got to
new arm chair for the pig, and I'm
afraid those cabbages won't do with
out a wet nurse!" squealed Mr..
Spoopendyke.: s'Isuppose I've got to
hire a man to see that the meadow
don't 60 fishing on Sundays and up
set your religious notions. o. you
are a farmers wife, you are! If II
had time to write an index to YOU
and get some dodgasted binder to
fix you up witha fly-leaf, you'd make
a whole agricultural report!"
And Mr.. Spoopendyke shot into
the house and to bed, while his wife,
having put all the oil lamps into
buckets Of water so they couldn't
explode during the night, fell asleep
dreaming that the cabbage patch had
eloped with the onions, while the cow
and the pig died Of weevil, and the
windmill had abandoned agricultural
pursuits and started off through Ohio
preaching the gospel. -G
To Advertisers.
The LEDGER, some time during the
month Of October, will issue a 1000
edition to accommodate its patrons.
If we can get advertising enough to-
make It pay, we viii make the edition