The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1882-10-26
The Woman Who Has Been Shopu;ng.


Here she comes, with her arms full
and her face flushed with heat and ex.
cltement. She rushes through the gate
ana along the platform with the energy
and fright OF one chased by an infuri-
ated bull. She chambers into the ear.
ali OF breeze, awaking the echoes, as
soon as she puts her head inside, with
the exclamation: 80 dear! how warm il
Is. addressed to her companion in nery-
ousness-for as a matter of course there
Is shopper mate with her.
The seats are perhaps half of them oc-
cupled, but it is not in the nature of the
shopping woman to stop in the first car.
Away she goes to the next and the next,
until she finds one which is quite full,
and then she turns about like a hunted
beast at bay, and frantically retraces her
steps. BY this time the other cars have
| pretty well filled up, and it is not until
she has gone way back to the rear car
that she finds two whole seats, one for
herself and mate and one for her parcels
and packages.
She is now all a-glow. Frantcallv
she tugs at the window, but the window
does not bulge an inch. Your car win
dow holds woman in utter contempt. 1t
Will yield only to the persuasive force of
| manly muscles. 1t is to be hoped that
| when woman gets her rights, car win
doWs shall at last acknowledge her en-
reimbursement, and cease to constantly
and perpetually remind her, as they now
/ do, that she is the weaker vessel. 1t would
| go hard with the woman folk if co-tray-
| nf ~
Ii it were otherwise, the dear creatures
might sutfocate before relief came to
| them. .,..-..=
| The window having relented before
the power of man, the shopping woman,
| what with her fan and the fresh breeze
from the outside, finally gets sufficiently
cooled to look at her watch. But that is
rather from custom tLan from any idea
| OF obtaining accurate intelligence rela-
tive to the flight of time, for woman's
watch is almost as tickle as a woman's
will Having gone through this form,
and remarked again and again upon the
terVent temperature, the shopping
woman suddenly exclaims: "Why, we
had lots of time, hadn't we?' This dis
covery furnishes q fruitful theme for
conversation for many minutes. Then
follows the opening OF packages, and
the history of each purchase is told with
a minuteness quite wonderful to one who
does not happen to be woman. The
air is full of "'says PSI and ''savs he's,''
and of ''lovely' and ''beautiful'' and
similar adjectiyes emphaticalIy ex-
pressed. l.-.
A man under similar circumstances
may say that he has so-and-so in this
bundle, such a thing in that, and some
other thing in third. 1t is different
with woman, When she has bought
an article, she loves to exhibit it, and She
counts it no hardship if she has to open
and close parcel dozen times in half as
many minutes. So the shopping woman
opens each parcel, and with it her mouth.
out of which flows, besides the history
OF the particular purchase, three-vol-
ume story Of matter relevant and irrele-
want, mainly anticpatorv of how this
will match that, or how both will look
with third purchase of silk, satin or
worsted beads, buttons or bonnet.
The shopping woman, engrossed in
the enhancing details of her three-vol-
ume story, minds not that the car has
entirely filled up. She sees not the
weary male bipeds. whose eyes look SO
Wlstfully at that seat filled with her myr-
lad purchases. 1t is only when the con-
ductor comes that she is aroused to things
prosaic and to the necessity of giving up
that extra seat. And even then, it must
be said, she does not remove her par
GELS with pleasure or with alacrity, not
withstanding the tired look of the woman
with babe who stands patiently waiting
for the seat tc be emptied.
Each parcel is lifted as tsnderly as if
it were an egg, and it is after much time
and many 80. dears," and not few
corrugations OF brow. that the precious
invoice is transferred to the lap of the
shopping woman. For the remainder of
the journey she is unhappy. Some per-
sons, it is said, want all before them.
The shopping woman wants all before
her when in the car-all before her in
the next seat :.-f
When the conductor comes for her
ticket, it is work of time for her to eet |
at it. Her purse is somewhere hidden |
below the superincumbent mass of par |
GELS, parcels of a ''mussablen nature,
and they must be handled gingerly and |
slowly. Conductors are patient animals |
but close observance of the shopping
woman will discover the secret of their |
careworn faces and premature grey
hair.
When the train arrives at the shopping
woman's station, she waits until it has
come to a full stop, and then begins
leisurely to load up, and it is not until
everybody else has got out and the inn
patient engineer is ringing his bell, that
she and her parcels get into the aisle,
and it is only when the last atom of the
patience has flown that she
steps at last on to the station platform.
The shopping woman has so many 7
cares of her own that it is not to be ex-
pected of her to care for anybody or
anything else.-B0ston transcript.