davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

A leading citizens of Dallas, one of
the most intelligent property owners in
the town, was reading a newspaper in
the Teas Sytin9s office a few days ago,
when he come across the paragraph,
"The admission Of Dakota is a fore
gone conclusion at Washington, where
opon he said: 81 can't keep up with
the run of the Washington scandals,
there are so many of them. What
did Dakota admit %
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

"Conductor," said lady passenger
on the train, pointing over her shoulder
to man who was resting his feet on
the window-sill behind her, 81 wish you
would request that brute to take his
feet down" 81 daren't ma'am," re
piled tho polite but cautious ticket
fend, "he is member of the legisla-
t,,ro -
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
GRAND RAPIDS, WIS, THURSDAY, APRIL 90 1882

been received at Baltimore for the cost of
loading and discharging.
ABOUT thirteen thousand Mormons
gat hered in the tabernacle at Salt Lake to
hear President Taylor outline the situa-
ton. He declared the Edmunds law un-
constitutio nal. but said the Saints would
submit to it's provisions while fighting
them in the courts.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

ga Philadelphia firm few days ago
drew their check for $6,767, ,776.75." 1t
is supposed the parties publish news
paper and wished to pay their editors
two weeks back salary. They must
have cut down their forces since last
pay day.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Two car loads of scrap iron, loaded at
Peoria, H., were found to consist en-
tirely of things stolen from the railroad
company over whose line the audacious
thieves proposed to ship it to a maket.
~--E1change. 1t was IA her ironical.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
IndOrsed by the Clergy.

We take pleasure in recommending Dr. Warn
er's W hite Wine of Tar Syrup to the public, and
20 any public speaker that may be
troubled with throat Or lung disease.
Rev. NJ. L. BOOHER,
Pastor Presbyterian Church, Reading, Mich.
Rev. y. T. IDDINGS,
Albion, Mich.
Rev. V. L. LOCKWOOD,
Ann Arbor, Mich.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

UNITED STATES TREASURER GlLFlLLAN,
at Washington, last Saturday, received
from one of the city banks $40 gold
coin, which had been cleverly reduced
II value four grains, or 20 cents, by FL
ing from the surface next to the milled
edges, and as it was one and half
grains below the least current weight
it had to be refused
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
q = III -IE1 II 1 II = IT ~
Hatcher's Station Ga.

Ex-Governor Gwyn, of California, is
tall, stoutly built, with an abundance of
snow-white hair and great dignity cf
manner. He was in congress with
Webster, Clay, Calhoun and Douglass,
and was at one time private secretary
of President jackson,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

An Oregon man fell on the icy walk
and broke his nose, and when he came
to sue for damages the jury held that
his looks mad been improved 80 per
cent. He therefore got nothing, and
will devote his time to improving the
looks of the jury.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

The doctor told a Vermont woman,
whose husband was sick, that certain
medicine wouldn't keep, and as she did
not give it all to him she took it her.
self, 30 as not to nave it wasted. Folks
living two miles away, with hill be-
tween, heard her complain of the effect.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
A WORLD OE G0OD.

One of the most popular medicines now before
the American public, is Hop Bitters. You see it
everywhere. People take it with good effect 1t
builds them up. 1t is not as pleasant to the taste
as some other Btters, as it is not whiskey drink.
II is more like the old fashioned bone-set tea that
has done world of good If you don't feel just
right try Hop Bitters-Nunda Ne,os.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Seven watchers with clubs couldn't
prevent a ghost from holding carnival
in vacant Vermont farm house, but a
good healthy skunk, let loose in the
building, sent the ghostly visitor away
on gallop. There's your remedy for
uhoofC
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

An outof-town druggist entered a
Boston apothecary shop and had sim
pie prescription put up. The charge
was $1.50. He remarked that it was
rather dear, because. as he was drug
gist himself, he knew the price of in
gradients. "That alters the case" was
the response; seventeen cents. please"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Francis Joseph of Austria never ap-
plauds when an actor makes good hit,
and he never seems to care when an
actor makes bad one. He preserves
the expression of countenance of a man
who has an annul free pass in his
pocket.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

ONLY FIVE hundred men and two
women have applied for appointment
upon the commission that is to govern
Utah under the Edmunds bill, and yet
it is claimed by some that this is a ma
tion of office-seekers.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
VOL XIV.

The new comet will probably be visi-
BILE to the naked eye about the 1st of
May. About the middle of May it will
be near the north star, and there is
every reason to expect that it will then
be brilliant object in the heavens.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
HARD LUMPs IN THE RFF4ST.

DR. r. '. PIERCE, Buffalo. n. =: Dear Sir
1 wrote you some time ago that thought had
a cancer. There was large lump in my breast
as large a walnut, and had been there four
months. / commenced taking your Golden
Medical Discovery" Favorite Prescription" and
" Pellets IN June, and the lump is gone.
Yours gratefully,
MRs. r. r. CLARK,
lrvingtOn, Mich.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
H.vpavr,1r Ohio Fob II l

HAyEsvILLE, Ohio, Feb. IL, 1880.
am very glad to say have tried Hop Bitters,
and never took anything that did me as much
good. l only took two bottles and l would not
take 800 for the good they did me. / recon-
mend them to my patients, and get the best re-
suits from their use.
c. B. MERCER, NJ. D.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Mr.. Samuel Dedron, of Loveland, o., writes .
Il think L have cause to be glad. Afflicted for
years with painful kidney troubles and chronic
dyspepsia, / was induced to give DIR. Guysott's
Yellow Dock and Sarsaparilla trial. The
very first dose seemed to touch the right spot
don't know what back ache or sour stomach
now is"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

The Washington court before which
the arguments were made pro and con,
on the motion to quash the indict-
ments against Gen. Brady and the
other star route conspirators, has rem
dered its decision, refusing to quash.
The accused will now have to face the
music
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Aliens Iron Tonic Bltters, is the grand spring
blood purifier. tonic, liver invigorator and appe-
tizer. 1t gives strength and vigor to the whole
system, aids digestion and the assimilation of
food, and cures dyspepsia.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

GEN. SHERMAN wants no exception
made in his favor in the new military
officers retirement scheme General
Pope is the only officer that will be
affected by the forty years continuous
service clause. General Rufus Ingalls,
has an amended bill to propose.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
Free TO all Ministers Of Churches

will send one bottle of White Wine of Tar
Syrup gratis, to any minister that will recon-
mend it TO his friends after giving it fair test
and it proves satisfactory for coughs colds throat
or lung diseases. Respectfully,
DR. C. D. WARNER,
Reading Mich
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
Disappointed Entirely.

Mr.. w. F. Hetherington, editor of
the Sentinel, informed one of our rep
resentatives that he tried st. Jacobs Oil
for rheumatism, and found it all that
could be asked. The remedy caused
the pain to entirely disappear.-Em
porid Kan. NeaOS.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

81 have found st. Jacobs Oil to be a
most excellent remedy for rheumatic
pain," says Mr.. f. Latham, Harrison
street, Providence, E. I.-Boston Herald.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Somehow or other Mr.. Blaine, in
working the wires, dropped his insula-
tor in the opening of the fight.-AtIanta
Gnnstit1ninn
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
aECAME sOUND AND WE'LL

X. V. PIERCE, Nj. d.. Dear S3r-My wife,
who had been i'll for over two years and had tried
many other medicines, became sound and well by
using your t. Favorite Prescription" My niece was
also cured by its use, after several physicians had
failed to do her any good.
Yours truly,
THOMAS J. METHVIN,
Hatchar,s Station Gu
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Even if a boy is always whistling Il
want 10 be angel" it is just as well to
keep the preserved pears on the top
shelf
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Teacher to a small boy: "Why does
the proverb say about those who live in
glass houses?" Small boy: "Pull down
the blinds"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20
NOTROUBLETO SWALLOW

DIR. Pierces Pellets (the original little
liver pills !" and no pain or gripping. Cure sick
or bilious headache, stomach, and cleanse the
system and bowels. 25 cents vial.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1882-04-20

Senate-The senate passed the bill restoring
Captain Corbin Of the navy to the active list to
take force next after Commodore Nicholson with
restitution from December 12, 1873, of the differ
encs of pay between that OF commodore on the
active list, waiting orders and that Of captain
retired on half pay. There was considerable dis
eussion. The vote showed % 30 II, Cameron, of
Pennsylvania, and McDill voting with the demo-
Gratis.
Ro,ase.-An original house bill passed appro-
priating $50 900 for the subsistence OF the Ara
phoes, Cheyennes, Apsches, Kiowas, Comanches
and Wiohitas, in the Indian territory, the same
being deficiency for the current year
The house went into committee of the whole on
the post Office appropriation bill.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
A Brave Engineer.

Joseph A. Sieg, an engineer on the
Pennsylvania Railroad, saved the lives
of six hundred passengers by his pres
ence of mind and heroic daring. The
cab of the engine had caught fire, and
forced the engineer and his fireman
from their posts. The train at the
time was going at the rate of thirty
five miles an hour. Great consterna-
tion prevailed among the passengers.
As a last resort Sieg, the engineer,
climbed back into his engine through
flames and smoke, and succeeded in
stopping the train. He was horribly
burned, his face being disfgured and
his clothing completely burned from
him. He is in very serious COIL
dition.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
Chinese Fitial Piety.

The mother of young gentleman
being i'll, he secretly prayed that his
own life might redeem hers. His
prayer was, however, unsuccessful, for
the lady died. Thcreupon her son,
unable to take up his abode ut her
tomb, owing to the duties he owed his
father, visited it three times day
regardless of wind and rain and when
his father died he built himself rush
hut at the grave of his parents, with
only sufficient room in 1t to allow him
to crouch in most uneasy attitude,
and continued the last sad rites long
after his three years mourning had
expired. He was found one day in
this wrctched dwelling by the local
magistrate, engaged in punctuating the
vi king for the benefit of the neighbor-
ing students. His example has had
most ennobling effect upon the people,
and he is now rewarded by the be-
stowal of imperial honor.-PsF'rs
(Chin0) Gazette,
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
Billiards Among Ladies.

Billiard playing, which has been
more or less popular with ladies in
Europe since the days of Mary, Queen
of Scots, is indulged in very largely by
New York bellies, and is becoming more
fashionable every day. There are many
lady experts at the game in the city,
including the wife of Albert GARNER,
the famous professional, who is noted
for making fancy shots. tits matter
of current society gossip that matches
are often played between Murray Hill
bellies for such stakes as new gloves
and toilet trinkets. Sometimes" said
a gentleman, "the sterncr sex are in
vited to these little select evening en-
tertainments and recklessly squander
all their immediate pocket money in
gallant wagers on their favorites."
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
The Author of "Home, Sweet Home..

Mr.. w. w. Corcoran's generous en-
terprise of bringing home to an Ameri-
can grave the exiled dust of John
Howard Payne, recalls the aged phi
lanthopist's "reminiscences of the poet.
He saw him first in 1909, when Payne
called "The American Roscius," was
playing in Washington theatre. Mr..
Corcoran, who was then mere boy
says: Whenever l could get twenty
five cents to pay for seat, l went to
see and hear the tragedian;" and his
memory Of his appearance and action
is now fresh and clear, after lapse of
seventy-three years. Two years later
he saw him again, when Payne fled to
Georgetown from Baltimore, where he
had been trying to defend a printing
office from mob. In 1910 the per-
sonal acquaintance of the two begun,
and continued on very intimate terms
until Payne went as United States con-
sui to Tunis and died there. Mr.. Cor
coran has selected the spot where the
poets remains are to rest. 1t is tri-
angular plot, near the eastern entrance
of Oak Hill cemetery, on the crest of a
hill, overlooking the valley of Rock
Creek. The place is marked by soli-
tary, magnificent beech tree. The re-
mains will be inferred next spring with
appropriate ceremonies, and a plain,
massive monument erected above them,
bearing only the inscription;
JOHN HOWARD PAYNE,
Author of "Home, Sweet Home"
Born June 9, 1892;
Died April 10, 1912.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
Compensation.

Changes that are seeming losses,
All with recomponse are blest,
For the good to better groweth,
And the better into best.
When the Springs frail flowrets wither,
Summer roses take their place,
And when blooming Summer leaves US,
Bright-robed Autumn's radiant graco
Decks the woods and fields with glory,
Until Winter strips them bare;
Then the white snow flowers blossom
In the garden of the air.
See the beauty of the morning
Turns to glowing gold at noon;
Royal hues of sunset yield them
To the radiance of the noon.
Though the darkness following daylight
Seemingly its brightness mars,
Yet the night is crowned with beauty
In the grandeur of the stars.
So we find full compensation
For all changes life doth bear:
Sun and shade alike are pleasant,
And the world is ever fair.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
Drifting.

The tide went out.
Shining pebbles and shells that lay
On the shore, at the beck of the white-armed
spray,
Went out with the tide.
The tide went out
And hundred ships asleep on the strand
sprang up, and away from tho hateful land
Went out with the tide.
The tide went out
And life as sweet as life might be,
Drifting away to the unknown sea,
Went out with the tide.
The tide came in
The pebbles and shells, with the waves dis
dain,
Flung from their arms to the shore again,
Came in with the tide.
The tide came in
The weary ships from their voyaging,
Laden with many precious thing,
Came in with the tide.
The tide came in
But the life, as sweet as life might be,
Came not back from the unknown sea-
Came not in with the tide.
Emile A. Brdddock
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
A "Drummer's'' Baggage.

A well-known commercial traveller
was last week introduced by the land
lord of the hotel at which he was stop
ping in Minnesota to the landlords
Oldest and handsome daughter. This
is my gal," said the landlord. "She's up
and comm, but you can't trust her.
I'm tryin' to drive some foolish notions
out of her head, an III do it or I'll
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.
Good-f d-for-nothing 20.

GO0d-fOr-nOtnlnB ~.
On the beat-Y our heart.
The crow is shy bird, but he gener-
ally has caws for alarm.
The easiest way to put up a stove
is to send it to the pawnbroker's
When powder magazine blows up
it can, we suppose, be called flash liter
ature
1t is dangerous to ask a woman idle
questions when she is adding up
grocery bill.
Earth has nothing softer than
woman's heart, unless, perhaps, it bea
tomato in the prime of life.
"What madded me-" said the man,
"was not that the goat chased me, but
that the sympathies of the folks look
ing on were all against me-
The largest bar of gold ever cast in
the United States weighed 450 pounds.
An invitation to walk up to the bar
would have been accepted by almost
any man.
Mr.. ]. J. H. Gregory says that an
acre of land may contain six tons OF
worms. So it may; but if Mr.. Gregory
ever tried to dig box of bait on ten
minutes notice of an invitation to 60
fishing in dry time, he knows it
don't.
A few years ago fat fellow asked
old Sir Francis Burdett, while in Par
lament, for some position, saying:
Don't you remember me? / used to
be page" "Well," responded Sir
Francis, you have grown into
volume"
II thought I'd call round" as the
ball said when it came through the
window pane "I'll get square with
you," soliloquized the housemaid, hid
ing it in the cupboard. Then the boys
called round, but the housemaid made
them pay for the broken square.
The London Lancet says that people
who sneeze often are the healthiest. A
sneeze sets the blood circulating and
throws off cold which is trying to
settle. This medical opinion is evil
IDENTIFY made in the interest of snuff,
and the public is not yet up to it.
One of Curran's friends, notorious
and lucky gambler, getting entangled
in conversation with him, gradually
lost his temper, and at last said, with
great vehemence mo man, sir, shall
trife with me with impunity." Curran
corrected him by saying "Play with
you, you mean"
A gentleman in India, putting on
his boots, felt horrid prickly object
like centipede in one of them. With
great presence of mind, instead OF
withdrawing his foot he forced it VIC
lently down and stamped furiously
though enduring exquisite agony in
the process. But it WAS not centipedt
only small backing brush Jeff
there by q careless servant.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16

There is but little originality of
character in the world Most men are
imitators. They do that they have
seen others do, and they say things
they have heard said. Few have the
genius or courage to strike out new
path in thought or action. The general
mode of education tends greatly to this
result. Everything is based on books
youth are hardly allowed to think for
themselves; they arenot taught to look
within, and draw upon the resources
which nature has placed there.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
The Advantages of the American Press.

In the matter of late news the Am
erican press has the advantage of the
European. Whatever happens in this
country after 10 or II o'clock at night
is too late for the morning editions of
the London papers; but anything oc-
curing there as late as or 8 o'clock
in the morning can be published in the
morning papers on this side. In the
same way the afternoon papers in this
country may get the whole days news
from abroad while the European pa
pers can get only half a days news
from this side.
Stephens City star. (Stephens City, Va.) 1881-1883, 1882-12-16
The MARQUIS Shot.

There is good story told of the !
Marquis of Waterford Lord Charles
Beresford's uncle) and the way he
served young fellow whose indlffer-
ence to the lives and limbs of other
people when out shooting with them
had gained for him somewhat of
reputation. The young man. though
he ought to have been deprived OF his
gun license by special act of parha-
ment, was the son of duke OF such
high standing in the political world
that nobody venturcd more than mild
remonstrancc with him for his care
lessness, and while few cared to join
shooting party of which he made one,
his position got him invited where
men of more caution but less blood
would have been excluded. 1t SO
happened that one October both
the marquis and Lord Joceline
Clinton the young man in ques-
tion-found themselves staying for the
shooting at Wolterton park, Lord Or
ford's place in Norfolk. There was a
large party staying at the house, and
more than one fortunate escape from
Lord Joceline's reckless gun was the
nightly topic in the smoking room.
Several of the men had already been
grazed on one or two occasions by shots
fred at close quarters, and one who
had been his nearest neighbor one
morning had one of his .whiskers and
eyebrows singed off by flash from a
muzzle heedlessly placed within an inch
of his cheek. Lord Joceline paid small
heed to the remarks he heard, and
laughingly treated all that was said as
a Joke. But Lord Waterford smoke ed
his pipe in silence, only joining
in the talk so far as to confide to a
friend, who sat near. his determination
to put an end to the young mans ex-
ploits should it come in his wav to dc
so. It is said that Lord Joceine over.
heard The remark but said nothing.
At all events, next day the party
went out as usual, and, as chance woul(
have it, when shooting an outlying
cover, Lord Waterford and Lord Joce
line stood ten feet apart. In the mids
of an exciting battue rabbit starte'
out of the bushes and ran between tn
two. Lord Joceline, disregarding al
orders to the contrary, leveled an
fired at it. The rabbit got safely away
but about dozen of the shot intende
for it lodged in Lord Waterford's legs
His back happened to be turned a
the moment, but wheeling aroun
without sign of pain, ere the revel
beratim had died away, he called ou
in loud tone: "Whoever fired ths
last shot hold up his handp' Lor
Joceline, in the bravado of the momen
held up his hand with laugh. Hardl
had he done so when Lord Waterfor
raised his gun and let him have tn
contents of one barrel in his pain
Fortunately it was defective car
ridge, from which most of the shot ha
fallen, else it would have been ba
day for Lord Joceline. AS it was, h
carried away enough leaden pellet
among his finger-joints to make saddle
and wiser man of him, and cure hil
effectively of the popularity that ha
made him terror in the shooting fiel'
No one after that had ever cause {
complaint against him.