Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1882-01-19
HIS OWN SLANDERER.
Some ,ininor aud a lltjlo PHILOSOPHY.


Says the san Francisco Post: Our
readers may not be able to perceive
much fun in the following, but perhaps
they may strike instead a small deposit
of homrly philosophy that win do as
we'll.
lie was tall, Thin. stranger,
with scanty hair and the burrows of
trouble and distress starting competing
branch roads from the corners Of his
eyes and moutb and as he stepped from
the cars Mt Mmgsyille he hurried up to
the station-master and said, with fever
ish eagcrness.
I'm coming to settle in this town. My
name is Azariah Zollicoiler, and ! love
dog fights.
"Eh?" said the agent dog fancicr,
] sp'ose?n
mo, no." reioincd the newcomer,
impatiently; 81 don't make business
Of it. | mean that dog-fighting is mere
~ my weakness my ruling vice don't
Won sec?' and inquiring the way 20 the
nearest hotel, the settler gathere4 up his
belongings and departed. after first per-
tinaciously introducing himself 70 the
ticket clerk and porter, and informing
them each separately and coEiidentially
rs 10 his dog-tighting predictions.
''Do YOU want enc room, Mr. Iollicof-
fer, or a sutegn asked tire hotel clerk,
rs the newcomer wrote his namc in biz
lotters, with san Francisco, Call as
his hailing place.
u don't want either explained the
Misunderstanding wayfarer, anNiously.
''Ihc fact is, I'm going 10 stay with II
friend here till get started in business;
but rs this was q sort of public place, |
thought I'd just register and state to
you that Tn terribly fond OF fighting
dogs just gone on it. as itwere; It is my
great falling
what the devil do I care about your
failings?" growled the aujocrat Of The
counter
But the promoter Of canine warfare
had already buttonholed the cashier, the
barkecper and the bell-bov, ana was en-
gagged in disseminating further iuIorma-
ton as to his unfortunate peculiarly TO
the loungers in the rcading-room, when
the landlord suddenly collared him and
said,
Look a-here, mister! II you think
you car come around here with your
funnt business and practical Jokes.
You 70 off your nut. Ii You don't tell
me what You mean 10y all this gulabout
dog fighting, I'll stand You ON your
head.
Eyes; what do YOU mean, YOU crazy
cuss?' growled the crowd, gathering
round
Gentlemen" said the man, looking
around him sadly, Il am sorry TO be
obliged TO explain. but | see there is no
help for it, | have been living in San
Francisco for the past two wears.
"Woll, what of it?''
Tho ,hrec years prior to that ipaSsed
in Sacramento; the -four before that in
Chicago, stin previous To which had
resided in New Orleans, 81. Louis and
Cincinnati. From all of the places
l was driven by calumpy and SANDER
What crime had You comnitted?'
'None-nono whatever gentlemen.
| am neither better nor worse than the
rest Of mankind But when q stranger
settles in n new place. everybody stems
10 be on the lookout to give him bad
character for something No matter
what ms merits are. they amt happy
until hey can lind some one mean thing
To say about him, and the first thing they
hit upon generally sticks,
Does, ch2' said the crowd, which
had been deeply interested
''Ycs, it docs and the more you kick,
the tighter they faSten it on YOU, too. l
$ 4 A,l,