New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-11-05
TIE PRLLOSOPRIC BLLLINGS.


One Of the figures often seen IN the corridors Of
the Fifth Avenue Hotel Is that of Josh Billings.
For sometime no has been Invisible, but yesterday
he reappeared agaIn-the same clerical, solemn
looking man. but more communicative than usual.
He looked to me more Ike Edward Everett Hale,
the Unitarian minister, than ever. his long, dark
locks fell upon his round shoulders from beneath
a broad-brImmed hat aud turned forward under his
ears His beard. which Is becoming quite gray, was
trimmed closely TO his face The coO- VI his skin
resemb.ed that OF an lndlan,and ms Jaws winch are
usually angular, were well wounded out. lie didn't
remain more tnan minute or two IN one place,
but would stalk around with his peculiar
tony, giant stride, swinging MS long
arms. IL conversation the philosopher talks
dueutly, and not al all as you would naturally ex-
pect him to- He makes yOu laugh frequently. but
he does not even smile himself He IS all the time
az solemn owl His earnestncss Is simply
phenomenal He makes many gestures with his
great hands, and irequon tly leans toward you ana
taps you the arm or shoulder with his forennger
Ii Is surprising how many people he knows. Almost
every second man who came III the hotel yesterday
ne spoke to. As he appeare % be IN hgh state
OF excl ement, asked him what had happened TO
put him IN such an uustrung condition
have just returned from a summer TIP he re-
piled. There isn't HAIR turned on the horses.
We started last May-my wife and Ito drlye
through New-Engaud and Canada Mrs. }. Is. dld
the driving ii yoG want TO see the country go
that way, and you'll see IT.
DID you make the journey for pleasure"
I've went for amusement and recreation. When
surrounded by crowd. Well, boys would say,
if you must have it, get a hall ready and III read
you my lecture They were not long in getting a
room ready
" hat lecture did you take with you"
The same old ectuee, The Probabilities or
Life That lecture i twenty-One years Old. Its
name has bceu changed several times, but people
don't know It, Did you ever see anything that had
such wonderful yitalty' Il Is made up OF small
paragraphs without the slightest connection be-
tween them 50 that can begin with the tail az
well rs the head, and read bacA~ard'
" DO you ever vary your style =
can't write any other way. WIN me every
e u Il
a. attempt to expand idea II becomes so weak
ened that II is good for nothing"
" DO you SIT down and study your aphoTisns
outp
No They come TO ME spontaneously. / may
| be walking down Broadway, or III an omnibus, on
train, talking here 10 You, when they come IKE
| tasn 1t may DC some days, however before De-
| termine the exact form they shall nave. One day
| recently | was called upon To make a hasty de-
| cislon. Says |, OF two evils choose -he lesser
| Then l stopped TO think That isn't right SAID ].
10 is as old as the hills and has been prOverD IN
! all languages, but It's not right You dont wane
/ to choose either of two evils, do yOui 30 | said,
| OF two evils accept the lesser. That Is better"
| Mr.. j. b. took ont notebook IN wElch he lad
IsO,t ed down some fresh condensed wisdom an hoqr
before. Tie lux was AOt dry. The last line read
" Kindness IS an instinct pollteness only an art
" " hat Is your definition Of humorE inquired.
Humor must be based truth he replied,
tapping me with his tor inner and drawing II back
| " IL Is because a thing IS ludlcrous ana nj the
same time true To nature that. people laugh at II.
Now, Artenus Ward was noJ a huuorist, but ne was
the droAest man the country has ever produced.
Writers who make their effects by hyperDoie aie
not humOTsts. Genuine humor lasts forever pc
cause t Is true, You TIRE OF hearing Il man tell
stupeudOus lies. DOestIcks out because nc goU
INTO this vein entirely"
" What do you think of Bob Bnrdette and the
class of writers 10 which he belongs =
" They can't last
" Is Mark Twain a humorlst =
His humOr Is genuine. consider 4im ne Dess
descriptive humorlst in the country. lie can write
a. long as he lives"
nat Is your estimation of Bret Harte y
la m a an -
why are humorists such melancholy looking
men -
Because said Josh, what they say comes
from meditation and reasoning. man who can
keen his COMPANIONS In a roar at his sayings may DO
Jolly good FELLOW but mes only jester"
The tall. stOOp-shOudered. angular philosopher
squeezed my hand in his big brown one, dropped It
abruptly and be took strides like the man who had
on even-l6ague boots.