The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-04-07
Hash.


1t isn't the girl that is loaded with
powder that goes oil the easiest.
Colored bellies refuse to wear bangs.
They say you cant pull the wool over
their eyes.
That's right; take down your stove
and put on your thin fannels this
month. Give tho poor undertaken
chance.
An editor who thinks he knows all
about farming, says in speaking about
strawberries, the best way to raise them
| is with spoon.
A ridiculous story is going the rounds
OF the country that Mr.. Bergh hatl a
young women arrested the other day, for
beating an egg.
"Young man," said the landlord, al
always eat the cheese rind." And the
new boarder replied, "Just 50; l am
leaving this for You"
DO not tattle. Do not carry gossip
from one family to another. Ii you
have wife let on. the job to her. She
will do 1t more eflectually.
"Amateur Gardener" wants to know
the easiest way to make hot house.
Leave box of parlor matches where
the baby can play with them.
"If you grasp ratllesnake firmly
round the neck he cannot hurt you,"
says Western paper. Keeping about
a mile ahead of the snake is also good
scheme.
Miss Dora Apple of Chicago is suing
Mr.. Stone of Wisconsin, for breach of
promise, demanding $4,000. And it
serves him right, Mr.. Stone should
have paired his Apple.
i DIR. Srother, q Kentucky lecturer,
holds that tn, Garden of Eden was the
Mississippi valley, and if that is so we
think Adam and Eve were very fortu-
nate in being chased out
"Hannah,r said landlady to her
new servant. "when thnre's any bod
! news, always let the boarders know il
before dinner. Such little things make
, great difference in the course of 6
. year."
A New Jersey farmer set an OLD
straw stack on fire to scare out a fox
)
, smoke and upbraidcd him for his care
! lessncss in not first jabbing around Will
! pitchfork to see il any one was there
= Another illustration of the value o
= advertising! A gentleman came int,
tho Courant oiii;c late the other nigh
and advertised the loss Of n valuable
. dog. When he reached home, fifteci
= minutes later, he found The dog wa
sitting on the doorstep. - IIarlfor
= Courant
l A Young man who thought he la,
5 won the heart, and now asked the han,
/ In marriage of 4 certain young widow
l. was asked by her, "What is the differ
e ence between myself and MIR. Bagley'
Y Durham COW p lie naturally replied
j. "Well, | dou't know" "Thcn," sal
+ the widow, "you had better marry ib
cow
U lyon may say what YOU please,' so
= EMMY remarked a red-noscd listener {
9 to o temperance lecturer. "but viii Ike
10 once saved my life" GLOW was that z
o "Why, wanted a drink so bad that &C
= up once in the middle of the night an
3 went out to hunt for saloon. While
Il was gone the house caught fire an
burned mp my WIFE
d. Very few pretiier girls have see
O than one who sat near me an evonin
If not long ago at table d'hote at Il
/. Continental, Philadelphia. The Low
l. liest Of auburn hair, beautiful feature
Is smallest mouths and prettiest of Tee,
iii vvuiUiucu ~ mane ucr exceedlngl
attractive. Turning to queer lookir
:, little old lady at her side she snddenl
i exclaimed: "Ob, ma, amt them mint
e pies beastly!'- Hotel Mail.
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