The Hickman courier., 1882-10-13
PASSAGES FROM THE JOURNAL 0F
A SOCIAL WRECK.


with Two painful facts staring me blaukly in
the face. ! am reduced almost literally &c
my last cent, and have no prospect of increasr
ing this sum. For the first lime in my life
may examine the situation impartially. 1t I:
not nv fault that IL is a physical impossibilit5
for me to get up early in the morning, and
therefore that never have stasd In any Office
more than two or three weeks at the longest
It is constitutional. / can't write n good
hand or Keep books correctly for the same
reason. Mathematics were left out of mJ
G. IMPOSITION. ! must smoke, aud IL is i'm
possible for me TO smoke poor cigar IL
ann in debt for cigars, as well as other neces-
sities' 'hqw san ishelp e, II smeud wtisingl, 8
Would suit me j avn not ioots There .
not man in New York who speaks French
with a better accent than do. can sing
better than most amateurs There lis nc
vanity in saying that people consider me
good-looking. / don't find it difficult 70
complete failure,- Il Is rot my faHR. I'm q
round pegin square hole. ] ought to have
been the Oldest sou OF Duke, with large al
lOwance. Instead, / am a helpless orphan,
with nothing sseaE. lseem to joke / an reali-
~ am in despair. Fortunately my laudlady
trusts me blindly, or l would be turned into
fhaye sold or paawhed an nv valuables. 4
might. .pawa my dress suit ns-studs,, batif 4
did couldn't go out TO dinner If / were
asked. and that is always a saving. can not
get p acc IN. an opera company because my
NtlCt iAo nut Drtil rAlltACtttttl y ttdtActt IAtlC
always Is sornething 10 prevent mY success. no
matter what i trv.
To-day | met Morton In the street. He
stopped me and said: Blythe way, Valen-
tine, your name will come up at the Amster-
dam very soon, .Hou. are sure TO get IN, -
Imagine paving club dues in my present
condition. Yet to belouglto the Amsterdam
has been one OF my ambitions. l hadto get out
81 it, aud said in an OF hand way -. Ah,
isame off the list. I'm thinking of living out
oftown."
So am IL think of occupying six feet of
real estate IN the country, II something doesn't
happen soon. Morton always irritates me.
He is one of those prosperous, fortunate
creatures, always so co1pIeteB Hs Ak.g, that
l Ieel hopelessly my own deficiencies.
JANUARY ID omething has happeusd-
bave al idea IL strikes me strange, yet
feasible. When | came in this afternoon
iou a letter iyi g on my'table. 4 opened 1t;
it ran as follows: t
New YORK. january IA. 1ss-
p" Families who are about 10 give receptions,
dinrer parties or other entertai menfs will be
gratifed osknow that persons who viii assist
In making these events pleasant and e joyable
can be obtained through the medium of the
Globe Employment Bureau. These persons
will rot be professionals, but parties OF culture
and refinement who will appear well, dress ele-
gantly, aud mingle with he guests, while able
S'd willing TO play, sing, converse fuently,
tel. good story, giyea recitation, or anything
that VIII neip 10 make an evening pass pleas
antV-Sr I|tet
" ftel Globe Employment Bureau IN this
plan simply complies wi the increasing de-
DIS of large class of its patrons The
attendance OF these persons, young or old,
can be had for the sum OF fifteen dollars per
evening" each. We will guarantee them 70 be
strictly honorable and reliable persons. Re
spectfully yours,
- ssTHE GLoBEENrLoSArExT BuREAu.Ds J
The idea amused me- / moralized on it as a
phase OF New York society; wondered what
sort Of people would employ these individuals:
wondered what the individuals would feel like
themfelves = smiled grimly at the inference
that could go to the expense of fifteen dollars
TO procure The services OF one of these persons.
While stood with the lettesin my hand,
thought flashed into my mind. Ii widened
and developed, until It possesses my whole
being. can't hire Globe ysung man. but
anythingfis better than starvation; 7 Willie q
Globe Young man
JANUARY 1s.-It is all settled, and | am in
the service-of~the-N -New--Y orl< Globe After
two days OF hesitation, I presented myself this
morning at the Globe office / was shown to
the Employment bureau, and there, through
little grating, .was interview ed by a Young
clerk OF supernatural composure- He had a
cool discerning eve that seemed to read INV
very soul and take IN my situation and errand
in a glance. l produced the Globe letter as
the simplest method OF introducing myself.
He looked at me wirh his discriminating ex-
preston. Let me see, he murm mured...s,We
have had three thousand applications since the
day before yesterday, and our listiscomplete
But six rblonde-good loolx{ns- -distin-
gnissned N faet'-he bit the handie Of his pen
one OF decision. Just follow me. please, (" he
concluded.
I followed him througf1a dimpassage. % a
little room where there ~as a piat,o Nj some
music on it. Standing beside the piano was
smaildark man, rubbing his hands aud bowling
politely as we entered. It reminded me OF
one of the tort ure Chambers of the Inquisition.
Whatwere they going to do to mel Ff3
The chief fpn -. -. A.
clerk, began the ceremonies BY saying: "
suppose You would not have come here without
being able to fll the requirements OF the
Globe circular Be kind enough to SIT down
and sing and play that song.n
IL proved to be .'In the CLEANING" was
IN good voice, and managed % sing it with
-sofne expression. 1tf sEtftlfst 40 ttf|
Bravo ~ said the second inquisitor, in the
shape of the little dark man.
lie then took me in hand. He proved to be
an Italian, and asked me questions in Italian
and French, in both OF which. languages an.
swered as well as Icould. vas then obliged
songs, opera bouffe, English ballads, and
dramatic pcefs Here q z ssaa sss's eon
Never mind" said the clerk, encour-
agingly; 'you have done remarkably well in
other respects, and you can easily learn the
regulation pieces"
He handed me a list, beginning with "Cur-
few shall not ring tonight and 1.-THE Charge
fof the Light Brigadev and endingr with
Be sey and are OUT and eThe May
Queen.'' I choked down my rising resent
ment. What wouldn't do for fifteen dollars
an evening, short of crimel
Very well, said, obediently.
/ was led out Of the torture chamber ex-
hausted, but still living. 1t is queer. feel
shaky. had to give them my own name. Ifound
there was no getting out of this. They said
that the whole matter was strictly in CONT
dence. They required references, and I had
taken the precsution to bring several letters of
recommendation from wellknown business
while before when was try ng Co get situa-
tion in business house down town. These
were satisfactory IS 20 my character-
have put the halter around my own neck
now.
N: B.-supposs Morton were to find this
outl
JANUARY 20.--I have had my first expert
ence in my new character. had been told to
De ready every afternoon by five o'clock for
orders Yesterday, about six in the after
noon, l received q message from the Globe,
directing me TO go tota house in East Sew
enty fourth Stree near Fifth Avenue, at nine
O'Clock that evening and submit myself to the
orders of Mr. @. X Slater. 1t was q consoi-
ing Thought hat l had never heard of Mr.. Q.
X. Slater, and that East Seventy-fourth Street
was an unknown region to me-
<functually at nine that evening I found
myself In the large parlor Of . house in Sew
enty-fourth Street. brightly LIGHTED. and filed
with people The centre Of the room was
cleared and several people were dancing to the
strains Of a band Near the door stood tall,
imposing gentleman with gray whiskers, and
lady In full evening Dress Doubtless my
hosts, or rather my proprietors-
What was to dot How were they TO know
who and what wasf As stood hesftatine,
found that their eyes were fixed upon me
with significant glance. Immediately went
toward them To my astonfshment the lady
greeted mS BY my name with the utmost
suavity.
Good evening, Mr.. valentine,n she said.
] am delighted TO see you"