The semi-weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1882-1886, 1882-02-01

Wro0gfal1y Accused By His Neigh.
boss q Beating aio WIZ.
Prom he 9oo DSoaoisoo Pot
Upon Van Moss avenue is DR.. Potts
Nj. Gu6's next door neighb0r, and one
morning about two weeks after the lat
ter had started I'm to become an amateur
performer on the bassocn, he was in
formed that the doctor wanted to see
him, and on descending 70 the parlol
found that gentleman sitting in tie mid
die Of the sofa and nanked by three 9th.
er gentlemen on the same block. Mr..
Cuff was surprised to notice that the
whole party wore q solemn and emhar+
reased look: and he inquired the nature
Of their visit.
1--WE have come, MI. Guff," said DR..
Potts, wiping his face, upon q most
delicate mission. A mission, assure
you, my dear sir, that nothing but the
most urgent necessity would induce US
"Indeed," said Cuff:
I'VE don't mean to assert, or even
hint, Mr..GufT, that the fault is all on
your side. kn0w-we all know-how
difficult it Is to get along always with
some women. There are times, sir,
when the best wife has 'tantrums' it
would require the patience Of an angel
to contend with. We all know that"
lyon bet do" said the other neigh
tors In chorus, and one of them passed
his fingers through his well-weeded
locks In highly reflective manner.
but, on the other hand, some allow
ance must be made for the domestic
trials and annOyances to which women
are subject. They are the weaker ve.-
sells, Mr.. Cuff, and we should always
bear that In mind before proceeding to
extremities."
did you come to tell me that ~ said
Mr.. Cuff, somewhat sarcastically.
Exactly, my dear sir; We have come
to have quiet talk with you. In a
friendly spirit, you understand, Mr..
Cuff. We came, my dear sir, in the
spirit Of peace and Cancellation, to pour
oil on the troubled waters"
"Oh, you have, Ell ," said Mr.. Cuff.
"Yes. You are . young married man,
Mr.. Cuff, and doubtless lack the exlN-
rience in some respects that we possess.
Now, there are other methods i'm the
management Of women more potent
than violence. For instance, when Mrs.
Potts gets q little cantankereus I just
suggest that perhaps she had better put
off buying that new dress until spring
or something Of that kind. Works like
a charm"
my way is to hint that shall have
to stop the girls credit at the dry gOt,tls
store. That generally fetches my do
mestic autocrat," said another.
II 80 most on the 'nO<ountry- this
summer dodge" put in third.
Fried oysters in box is probably as
good n.0llifier rs any," unused the
baltlest Of the party, land I've tried
most everything; l'esides they are
cheaper"
what all this d nonsense is about >"
said Cuff, who was becoming exasrer-
atetl.
"Why. you don't mean to deny, Mr..
Cuff" said the spokesman, reprOachful-
", THAT you beat your wife in the most
cruel nlanner:"
BEAT who ?" screamed Cuff:
why, that you drag Mrs. Cuff up
and hammer her all up with besl-s!at
or something" said one.
"And yank her round the room, by
her hair till she yells like AL Indian
chasing mail coach in ahead Of ti,ne::"
said another.
Its perfectly blood-curtlling, espe.-
tally on. Wednesday night" added all-
other indignant householder.
"wednesday nights! Why, those are
the evenings when practice music with
my brother-in.law," stammered Cuff:
''What, up in the garrett said DR..
Potts, turning very red in the face.
Eyes; we are learning the bassOOn
and cornet together, and"
"Mr. Cuff" said the committeeman.
getting up, very much embarrassed. and
holding out his hand, 1--WE apologize
overwhelmingly, Mr..
GufY," and they hastily filed out.