Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-03-02
EIshermen,s Whoppel.s.

WnoppersP A good-siZcd book could be
made OF fish stories. ssTen the weight
OF the largest trout you ever caught, -
sald an Eastern man to a native of Ne
Vada. Wal,'' was the answer, I" 1
can't exactly tell as to the weight, but
you folks can figger on it. Now, you
know it Is over 200 miles around this
yer lake. Put that down. As I said
before, don't know the weight of the
biggest fish ever yanked' out, but did
haul one upon the beach, and after l
landed him the lake fell three feet, and
you can see by the water-mark over
yonder it hasn't riz since.''
Another fisherman, giving his expert
ence, says: '' The fish began to pull
away, and every little bit the line would
slack up and then the pulling would be
twice as heavy. At last it felt like To-
connective was at the other end of the
line, and then 1 lost my presence of
mind and Jerked. 1t took pretty hard
jerking, too, but at last landed a fish
about sixteen feet long. / took it off
the hook and there was another one on
about two feet shorter, and so on until
took nine of them, and then came to the
bait, still on the hook. You see the way
of it was this: The first fish to grab and
swallow the hook was about two and a
half feet long. AS soon as he got fast a
bigger one swallowed him, bigger one
still swallowed them both, on up until
the ninth swallowed the whole eight. If
had only waited they would have kept
on until l would have had whale after
a while, and the oil and whalebone
would have sold readily for 5000"
This will compare with a Georgia fish
story told most appropriately by gen.
tleman named Bass. He said he caught
catfish, a squirrel, and an alligator all
upon the same hook at the same time.
The fish probably caught the squirrel
while swim ming across the lake, and
afuerward caught and swallowed an alli-
gator, about foot in length, and then
found and swallowed the bait upon a
set hook. When a catfish starts out on
a foraging expedition he will take in
anything from wheelbarrow to sad
die blanket.
A sportsman who camped six days on
the shores of the Banana River, Fla,
says: ga friend had given me small
clothes-line, over 800 feet long, with
heavy sinker and hook nearly five
inches long, backed by an enormous
shank. Every night at dark I was in
the habit of tying the line to the limb of
a cabbage-tree oyerhanging the camp
fire. Afterward would bait the hook
with half a mullet, take the sinker out
the full length of the line and drop it
overheard. One night after had gone
to bed there was trouble in the old cab
bage tree. The limbs were creaking
and dancing over the embers of the
campfire as if the spirits of the air were
at work. Buster, our dog, was barking
like all possessed. Reused from sound
sleep, it was some moments before /
could realize what was the matter. 1t
struck me like flash. / dashed out of
the tent in my bare feet, stood upon the
beach in the soft light OF the February
moon, and spent fifty minutes in getting
to the shore bass that weighed fifty
three pounds. At times could not hold
him. He absolutely drew me over the
shore. When landed him 1 was drip
ping with sweat. The splashing of the
water and my shouting to my comrades
started a regiment of owls, and they
filled the woods with their unearthly
boots. The owls started the alligators,
and the alligators the herons, and the
herons the wildcats, while hordes of
drumfish beat q general alarm. The
Doctor scaled the bass with a grubbing
hoe. The most of the scales were as
large as silver dollars"
An Irish Munchausen turned up at a
Boston restaurant in the humble capaci-
ty of a waiter. The guest had been
served with small lobster. 'Do you
call that lobster, MikeP'' 'sFaix, be-
ieve they do be calm THIN Holsters
here, sur. We call 'em crabs at home"
s'Oh," said the diner, styou have lob
sters in Ireland?" ssIs it Holsters? Be-
CORA, the creek is full of 'em. Many
time I've seen 'em when I Topped over
the sthrames." "How long do Holsters
grow in Irelandp'' "Well," said Mike,
thoughtfulty, s'to sphake within bounds,
sur, I'd say a matter of five or six feet"
"Whati Five or six feetP How do they
get around in those creeks?" ''Bedad,
sur, the creeks in Ireland are fifty or
sixty feet wide," said the imperturbable
Mike. 'sBut," asked the guest, ''you
said you had seen them when you were
leaping over the streams, and Holsters
here live in the sea-" "Sure did, sur;
we're powerful leppers in Ireland. AS
for the say, sur, i've seen it red with
,em." ssBut look here, my fine fellow"
said the guest, thinking he had cornered
Mike at last, sslobsters are not red till
they are boiled" '.Don't 1 know that"
said Mike, .sbut there are bilen springs
in the ould country, and they schwim
through 'em and come out all ready for
We to crack open and ate 'em."
This calls to my mind the story OF
Sheridan. At dinner one evening a
sportsman said: 81 was out fishing one
day in cold spring, and soon caught .
large mess of delicious trout. But what
was really surprising, not foot from
the cold spring there was one of boiling
water, so that when you wanted to cook
your fish all you had to do after hooking
them from the cold spring was to pop
them directly into the boiling" The
company all expressed astonisment and
incredibly at this monstrous assertion,
with the exception of Sheridan. 81
KNOW said he, 'sof phenomena yet
more surprising. I was fishing one day,
when came to a place where there
were three springs. The first was
q cold one stocked with fish. the second
q boiling spring. and the third natural
fountain of melted butter and parsley"