The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1882-09-24
UNCLE BILLY AND THE COON.
Pike County Tale ne Narrated By the
Truthful Ia. district Attorney.


MILFORD, Pa, Sept. 90" l tell you miss
Uncle Billy c. Jaeger of Delaware township"
said the Sheriff. Poor Uncle Bilyl He's
good ways now. from Pike county-and es-
pecially from Delaware township"
Yes assentcd the County Clerk. you're
right. Sheriff. for If BlyC amt in heaven I
wouldn't give much for the chances of some
other folks know"
Uncle Billy q. Jaeger was Pike County
charactor-an honest. sharp-feutured little
man one OF u numerous and easy going family
that lived down back O. Dingman's." Uncle
Billy had u shrill. piping voice and most
comical way. when no talked. Of emphasizing
and punctuating his words and sentences.
Added to this ho prcludcd and interluded his
remarks with high ialsctto hum. which
seemed to come clear from the top OF his head.
He had II good wife whom he called mother.
and runaway horse named Betsey Baker. He
was known from one end Of the county to the
other. for he had followed his side-splitting
little red nose into every corner of it, He had
been either witness. juryman. or litigant
ut every term Of Pike County Court for forty
years. aud when he died II few months ago. one
ofthe old landmarks went down.
Il can see him the way he used to come in
here court weeks" continued the Sheriff. " and
can hear him hum now. No tuning fork that
ever gave the pitch in singing school could get
within four inches OF the key Uncle Billy hum
med on. Hum. hum. hum: h-u-u-u-m. hum
he d sing. and WHEEL. gentlemen he d say,
Whill-yum c. jaeger. of Dellywar township. is
ketched. on the ioory. Hum. hum. hum;
h-u-u-u-m. hum. He is ketchcd on the jooree.
gentil men, an he'll try. u leetle Boorgn.
Hum. hum. hum; h-u-u-u-m, hum. leetle.
Boorg,n. an, the best you have. sir. Hun.
hum. hum h IL u-il. hum.
tiaI, to rye, but give me. the GOOD ole Boorg n"
II anybody has lively recollection Of Uncle
III the man. You know why. Tor / guess
you've ali heard how he and | captured the
few years ago. You know was on my way to
Stroudsburg to meet the Judge. and some of
the biggest LAWYERS there were in the district.
the best suit of clothes that three years in the
District Attorneys office could produce. in
this side OF Hynlan Westtrooks' where biz
chestnut tree stands in u field, near the road,
s%a oSs y Up s%1anf The he
Betscy Baker and the lumber box wagon stood
in the road Now it was a peculiarity, of Betsy
Bakers that ut one time you might lire u can
non off in under her. and she'd never move;
while at another time if rooster should
CROW hundred yards away she'd string things
We'll, stopped my horse opposite Uncle
Billy He never took his eyes from the tree.
and could hear him humming.
| HALO Uncle Byv said /. What is it?
What's up the treeF
-" Hum, hum. hum: h-u-u-u-m hum, said
Uncle Billy. without looking around WHEEL.
said he. it. may be. a. catty, mount Hum
u bear Hum hum. hum h-u-u-u-m. hum.
But my belief. is. sir that it's n. COON sir.
great fine, coon. Hum. hum. hum: h-u-u-m.
Well. Uncle Billy. said I. on my taps in
minute for you know if there is any one thing
in the trea.' said l. we must try aud get it out
SO Jumped from my carriage and stood by the
enough, half way UP the tree, in plain sight on
II branch, lay big coon. looking as fat and
sassy Niger baby playing with the grid;
whipped it out in minute. Uncle Billy had
never lowered his eyes once; nor moved his
w,h-o-o-a. Bstsey, Baker! Hum. hum.
II fired. Betsey Baker never moved. and
Uncle Billy never turned round to see whether
the, tree, l fired again. and the coon got up
-, Hum hum, hum; hi;q-n u hum; sang
s init to- bn %Ss'
Hum. hum hum; h-u-u-um. hum. i have
neerd that so9ns can be sh2Ek cut Of trees by
limb. Hum. hum hum; h-u-u-u-m. hum.
Kick-ing hard, on. the limb.
this time. an.i Uncle Bi.ly's hint was no sooner
made tnan ! was shining ~ that chestnut
the Stroudeburg Judge and lawyers, my good
clothes. AND new high bat. was led Of
the hat as drew myself up on the bottom limb
II branch above ME, as l rose to my feet. and
showed down over my eyes in less time, than
it on 1t looked rs IL yoke Of oxen had rolled
over it. and dropped tito the ground Ii wasa
when | got within reach of the coon was
sweating like the bottom slalJack on u platter,
chi F as II ha S| a 'oYe4 Th by, by rs maa
my cartridges Al the coon. but it Just laid there
on the limb and er1ned at me; That made me
h s ""Sn @ xxi Kick i i%agt tun The S ja%
ts me- Ss too C anG both HS left a branch
iosether. flung one arm around the limb as
went down and saved myself ! hung sps,
made a grab at me-. and set his teeth deep
enough IN the calf Of my leg to save himself.
on M e.. As Kicked and wriggled could
see Uncle Billy c. standing below, Just as i'm.
should have heard him give directions,
Hum. hum mum; h-u-u-u-m. hum, said
he. Mhe.I. SIR. You, have him, now, i was.
you, sir I'd raise my other faot, and lit HIM a
h-u-u-u,m, hum. 4 stun IN. on, the snoot SIR
And lid, give, him sun un on the snoot.
The coon had 10 drop, but he took IL nouthful
OF my Lee with him, The fan broke his neck
and killed MN. As struggled to draw myself
Hum. hum. hum; h-u-u-u-in. hum he
sang. Wheel, sir ho IS a line one. Hum,
sir us ever SEQ H. viii weigh not less tunn.
sixteen pound sir. Hum. hum, mum h-u-u-m.
mum And I'll Un ,.s ' Biy deSeratoy carried the
coon out 10 his wagon. chucked il in, climbed
w T. Ms sherE-"ih sea-. and dr9y" OF without
and tattcred IN the top OF iAe chestnut tree;
When ILL.,, he hn2 gone about hundrca yards
is'y.ns himself rs its hett once more. Then
Unr!c B.i.l-,-l-e-cr
Tugf l.t.fsy l,nt,,.P tpDl; II into bnr lpni