Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1882-01-14
WIT AND WISDOM.

cure, distrust is cowardice and prudence
folly.-.JohnSOn.
SYRACUSE has a female architect"
Norristown hasn't a female architect,
but she has more than one designing
woman. .-N0rristOaUn Herald.
HUMAN feeling is like the mighty
rivers that bless the earth it does not
want for beauty-it flows with resistless
force and brings beauty with it.
Or ALL THE riches that we hug, o
all the pleasures we enjoy, we can carry
no more ont of this world than out of a
dream.
AS HEALTH lies in labor, and there is
no royal road to it but through toll, so
there is no republican road to safety
but in constant distrust. - Wendell
Phillips.
THE clergyman has many duties
such, for instance, as engineering fairs,
making oyster stews and lemonade, ard
curing love-sick people by joining them
in marriage.
NEVER be at your place of business
when a persons wants to borrow money
of you, because il you are in you viii be
out, but if you are out You will be in.-
Salem Sunbeam.
II YOU gain an advantage over your
fellow-man, call it shrewd diplomacy.
If your fellow-man gains an advantage
over you, call it rascality. The terms
are synonymous-Keo Gate City.
A PROFESSOR CUNNING, up in Michi-
gan, is lecturing on ''After Man, What?"
A Fort Wayne editor, who has been
there, rises to remark that it is ''gener-
ally the sheriff or some woman. Bur
Hngton Ha,0Leye.
The Marquis of Butte started daily
paper in Wales, and after sinking about
S400, 600 in the concern, shut up the
shop. As marquis he is all right, but
in journalism the Butte is on the other
leg. -Pittsburg Telegraph.
In SPEAKING of newly welded pair,
gentleman said of the husband. "The
trouble with John is he has no mind of
ence: Sarah will always be ready to give
him piece of hers" responded the
lady.
AMATEUR PRINTER-There is no regu-
lar pastry cook connected with print
ing cfiice, although sometimes when
one of the hands makes little pi he
makes the foreman little tart, and then,
perhaps, the latter complains of being
''out of sorts. ."-B0ston Bulletin.
THE story is told of minister who
said, when one of his flock went over
the financial deficit in connection with
Christian enterprise: "My dear friend,
never mind the tears, this thing can't be
run by water ~ This is valuable sug-
gestion to some who give sympathy
much more easily than they give money.
-C0agregationalist.
A LOVER who had gone West to make
q home for his "birdie,' wrote back:
"I've got the finest quarter section Of
land 060 acres) ever put my foot down
on. Birdie wrote back: Suppose you
buy another quarter section, John, so
that you can have a lawn around your
foot" John made home, but Birdie
never was the mistress of it.
WHAT did you buy for your wife?--
Well tell you, but don't give it away:
An upright piano, horse and carriage,
gold watch and chain, diamond earrings.
a brown stone front, and several other
little things that have escaped our mind.
She seemed very much pleased when she
looked at her stocking and found it
filed with these nice things. s.-ROchester
Express.
One of Washington Irvings funny
letters tells about man who in going
home from dinner patty, at which he
had taken rather too much wine, fell
through an open grating into vault be-
meath the sidewalk He found the dark
ness and silence rather oppressive at
first. but in the course of the evening
several of the other guests fell IN, and,
on the whole, they had a very pleasant
night of it.
MosE SCHAUAIBERG was caught by his
Austin avenue rival in business tear
ing down the rivals posters announcing
the arrival of Christmas goods. "What
do you mean by destroying my posters,
you scoundrel?" asked the rival. threat
eningly. "Dot's we're you was fooling
Yourself" replied Nose, badly scared,
81 vas so much pleased NIT dot boster j
shoost pulled him down to see if there
vas any more reading matter on de
udder side - Teras Siftings.
DURING steam voyage, on sudden
stoppage of the machinery, a considera-
BILE alarm took place, especially among
the female passengers. "What is the
matter? What is the matter? For
heavens sake tell me the worst y ex-
claimed one more anxious than the
rest. After short time a hoarse voice
from the deck replied Nothing, mad
am, nothing only the bottom of the
vessel and top of the earth are stuck to-
gether."
IT IS related of a Massachusetts, lawyer
that he was seen anxiously looking for
his hat at the noon recess of the court
at Northampton the other day. Pick
J ing up one from the table and scanning
it obviously, he called out, "Mr. Officer,
some one has stolen my hat" The
officer, noting his absent mindedness.
! said, "Do You want two hats, Mr. At
torney?" The lawyer found that he
had his own hat on his head and hastily
left for dinner.
THE Chicago Tribune is publishing
what it pretends is an original primer
We should like to contribute lesson to
it. Here it is: Do Won see the man
with the shears? He lives in Chicago.
He is an editor. What does ne do with
the shears? He writes his editorials
with them He is reading n funny par