davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20
SqUeIeb hin

A new crank" as he styles him
self, has arrived in the city Hi'
name is Pitcher, and he halls from al
interior Kentucky hamlet called Mich
olasville. In reality this individual
is Fresh, the American, the seventh
son of the seventh son Of Awful Gall,
the father Of Cheek. Brother Pilch.
er comes with the avowed intention
Of climbin < the spine OF Bro. Barnes,
the clerical crank from the mountains.
He says that Barnes lie fraud sham,
an impostor, and that he pitcher
feels il his bounden duty to the public
TO expose the father Of the faith cure,
TO show him up in his true light, as il
were, and rid the people Of a danger.
Gus hypocrite. To do this thing.
Fresh, the American, considers it ne.
cessary to publish paper called the
Crank" and he promises that a jour.
nal Of that sort shall be issued next
Monday, from the Office Of Srd,cs. II
will be sold upon the streets, and
right down in the bottom Of his heart
Mr.. Fresh thinks, like Mulberry Sci
lers. that "there's millions in it," Pill
cher, alias Fresh, is not a crank, as
he wants the public to believe be is.
He is rather a weak minded, spindle
shanked, red headed little Tittlebat
Titmouse, signing for notoriety and
seeking herewith to make enough
money to keep himself pernnRptly
before the public. In a published in.
terview recently, and in converse.
tion yesterday with an Argus man, he
expressed the opinion that Barnes is
doing what he is only for the sake Of
notoriety. That may all be true, and
the Argus doesn't doubt that it is, but
suppose Barnes is trying to gain noto
riety, what is this ambitious kidding
trying to dor He seeks notoriety far
more than Barnes. He is piniDg for
a little cheap celebrity. He is dying
to have the public say: "Pilcher, Of
Nicholasville, is the man who exposed
Barnes, the evangelist He is a smart
fellow. There he goes, look at himp
But the public will never say this Of
Pitcher. He is not a smart fellow.
Barnes may be a crank, but he has
more sense in the end of his little fin
ger than this ruralistic smart Aleck
has in his whole composition. --[Sun-
day Argus.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The Stanford INTERIOR JOURNAL,
one of the very best county papers in
Kentucky, has been materially i'm
proved recently. Its enterprisirg
publisher has enlarged the paper,
which is now printed in quarto form,
semi-weekly, and it is gotten up in a
style that reflects much credit on the
proprietor, as we'll as the town and
county in which it is published.
Here's hoping its usefulness and pros
perity may continue to increase
( Anderson News.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

President James Buchanan's bach
elorhood was the result Of foolish
misunderstanding. While success
full young lawyer in Lancaster he be-
came engaged to a beautiful but some
what domineering girl. Some legal
business sent him into the neighbor
ing county, where he remained fol
several days. When he returned one
evening he found his Office filled with
importunate clients, and tired and
hungry as he was he attended to theil
business. Then hurrying TO the home
Of the angel Of his dreams he found il
closed and dark. Next morning he
repeated the the visit, and although
he saw Miss at the window, hi
was told by servant that she wal
not at home. He walked away anC
never approached the house again
Neither could subdue pride enough To
make or seek an explanation. TIL,
young lady shOrtlylafter died, and Mr.
Buchanan never attempted to win an
other woman.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Quite large business has been dore
in Maine the past season in the ship
ment of young spruce t2es to Kansas.
Trees from twelve to eighteen inches
in height are selected, packed in hogs
heads or crates and forwarded by rail.
The spruce is found to take more
kindly to the soil and climate of Kan
sas than any other evergreen, and
grows very rapidly, making efficient
protection against high winds.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20
The late General John b. Houst

The late General John b. Houston
used to tell the following: "Bur'
bridge had Just examined a report in
the case Of a Confederate prisoner, and
turning to his adjutant said; Il can
find nothing against this man. Have
him released The adjutant replied
General you are torgetful that man
was shot two weeks ago by your or
der" -[Lexington Press.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

WHICH Is THE WEAKER Sex p
Females are called the weaker, but
whyf Ifthey are not strong, who isl
When men must wrap themselves up
in thick garments, and encase the
whole in a stout overcoat TO keep out
the cold, women in thin silk crosses,
say they are perfectly comfortable
When men wear waterproof boots
over wooden hose and encase the whole
in India.rubber to keep them from
freezing, women wear thin silk hose
and cloth shoes, and pretend not TO feel
cold. When men cover their heads
with furs, and then complain Of the
severity of the weather, women hang
an apology for bonnet at the back
of their heads, and ride or walk
abroad in the northeast winds, profess
sing not TO suffer at all.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

SHAVING IN OLD TINES. Shaving,
in the olden days, was a lengthy OPP
Grafton, and English BARRIERS devised
various methods Of amusing their Gus.
toners while awaiting their turn.
They generally provided some musical
instrument, such as a guitar or nth.
ern. In old pictures the shaving basin
fitted into the chin. Until recent
period BARRIERS we re wont to bleed a
patient, and even extract teeth. In
London the familiar BARRIERS pole,
with its red spiral coil Of color, is a
"reminiscences of the staff the surgeon
gave his customer to grasp while he
was being bled. The tape or bandage
was twisted around the pole, which,
when not in use, was placed outside
the door. This staff was by order left
outside a surgeons door as a sign Of
his profession, and for convenience the
painted pole was substituted as a sign,
and the right to use it was extended
to BARRIERS about the year 100.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20
SnaHeor

Formerly this fearful malady was
the scourge of all countries. Only a
few generations since IL was 20 preva-
lent and fatal that one in six of the
whole population Of the civilized
world died from IL; but the great dis
covery was made that the human sys.
tenn could be protected against the raw
ages Of this malady, and an enormous
experience Of the usefulness of that
discovery has proved lis great value
and almost stamped out the disease.
In those countries where vaccination
has been most fully practiced, small.
pox is almost unknown. That socie.
ties should neglect so efficient pre-.
caution against so loathsome and dan.
gerous a disease can be attributed on.
ly to the fact that the protection Of
vaccination has been so complete that
there is not enough knowledge Of the
horrors of small pox left in the popu-
lar thought 10 stimulate men TO guard
themselves and their families against
it. We are 10 fair way to know
more about it, since there is now
smallpox in sixteen States, aud a new
impulse will necessarily be given to
the use of the simple and efficient
preventive.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The following is recommended for
inAsmed eyes: Borax, half a drachm;
camphor water, three ounces. The
above simple prescription is in COM
mon use by the highest medical au-
thOrities. 1t makes wash unexcell-
ed for the treatment of Inflammation
Of the eyes. In using it, lean the
head back and drop three drops in the
corner Of each, and then open the
eyes and Let II work in. Use it as
often as the eyes feel badly.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

MEANNEss OF A Rich MAN.-ODe
of the smallest pieces Of sharp prac-
tice we have heard of lately was
caught up by the Cashier of the Ma.
tional Bank. A well.known farmer,
in good circumstances, had for some
time been in the habit Of coming in
and asking for a sheet of paper to
write letter. After writing the let.
ter he would ask Mr.. Andrews to give
him an envelope and also address it
to a certain party. This he did at
various times. Andrews noticed that
when the postoffice presented a bill
there were several extra stamps charg.
ed for. An investigation finally led
to the discovery that the aforesa id
well-known farmer was in the habit
of dropping the letters in without a
stamp, and the card Of the bank and
the familiar handwriting of the Cash
Ter caused the Postmaster to stamp
the letters and present the bill to the
bank for payment Flemingsburg
(Ky.) Times.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Statistics furnished by the Superin.
tendent of the Census Of 1880 show
that the native population of New
York city is 727, 629 and the foreign.
born population 47S.670. Ireland
heads the list of foreign born residents
with 1913, $50, Germany coming next
with 15S,4S OF the native popula.
ton 1882 are colored.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

1--WE find, on looking over the tab
ulaied returns, that of all recognized
professions the one least liable to in.
sanity is that of literature. Accord
ing TO the returns there are, this, year,
1879, 149 men and women engaged as
authors, editors, journalists, reporters,
translators, or in other literary work.
Out of these, twelve only are return
ed as lunatics. p London Paper.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

1t is one Of the sweetest tests Of
friendship to tell your friend of hi,
faults. If you are angry with man
or hate him, it is not hard to go tc
him and stab him with words ; bu. &C
to love a man that you cannot bear tc
see the stain of ain upon him, and to
speak painful truth through loving
words, that is friendship. But few
have such friends. Our enemies usu
ally teach us what we are, at the
point Of the sword. mn
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

q
child al the Request Of ITS Mother
MY FRIENDs-I know how vain il
is to gid a grief with words, and yet
wish to take from every grave its
fear. Here in this world, where life
and death are equal kings, all should
be brave enough IN meet all the dead
have met. The future has been filed
with fear, stained and polluted by
the hesrtless past. From the wond-
rous tree Of life the buds and bios.
SONS fall with ripened fruit, and in
the common bed Of earth patriarchs
and babes sleep side by side. Why
should we fear that which will come
to all that isY We can not tell. We
do not know which is the greatest
blessing, life or death. We can not
say that death is not as good. We
do not know whether the grave is the
end Of this life or the door Of anoth.
er, or whether the night here is not
somewhere else dawn. Neither can
we tell which is more fortunste-the
child dying in its mothers arms, be-
fore it, lips have learned to form a
word, or he who journeys all the
length Of liie's uneven road. painfully
taking the last slow steps with staff
and cruich.
Every cradle asks us whence ?"
and every coffin "whither ?" The
poor barbarian weeping above his
dead can answer the question as in
diligently and satisfactorily as the
robed priest Of the most authentic
creed. The fearful ignorance of the
one is just as consoling as the learned
and unmeaning words OF the other.
No man standing where the horizon
of life has touched grave has any
right to prophecy future filed with
pain and tears. 1t may be that death
gives all there is Of worth 10 life. II
those who press and strain against
our hearts could never die, perhaps
that love would wither from the
earth. May be a common faith treads
from out the paths between our hearts
the weeds Of sefishness and hate; and
| should rather live and love where
Death is King, than have eternal life
where love is not Another life is
naught unless we know and love again
The ones who love us here.
They who stand with breaking
hearts around this grave need have no
fear. The large and the noble faith
in all that is TO be, tells us that death,
even at its worst, is only perfect rest.
We know that through the common
wants OF life-the needs and duties Of
each hour-their grief will less en- day
by day until at last this grave will be
to them a place of rest and peace
almost of joy.
There is for them this consolation:
The dead do not suffer. II they live
again, their lives will be surely as
good as ours. .L.. ID
We have no fear; we are all chill.
dren Of the same mother, and the
same fate awaits US all. We. too,
have our religion, and il is this: Help
for the living, hope for the dead.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

This is the season of the year when
the mince pie comes to town, and the
citizen comes down after dinner try
ing to pry raison seed out of a hol'
low tooth with a buck skin mitten,
and he ste ps in a drug store and or
ders another box of those powders for
Indigestion [Pecks Sun.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Mr. Gladstone is said to have one
faculty in a great degree-that OF mas
tering the contents of book by glanc'
ing through its pages. 1t Is claimed
that he can master any average book
in a quarter of an hour. He has a
sort of instinct which leads him
straight to its salient points. feA
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Col. McHenry's ukase has had
about as much effect as pebble
dropped in mid-oceAn. 1t threw up
little Republican spray, a harmless
wave circled out few yards and dis
appeared, leaving the Independent
movement as motionless as a painted
ship on a painted ocean. Kentucky
Mahones die in the borning, -[Cour.
ier.Journal.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

A Senator known for his judicial
and moderate temperament, said last
night that in his opinion both parties
were going all to pieces. "While,
said he, "the Senators speak much
more hatefully of one another within
their own party line than they do Of
their opponents, have never seen a
time when there was so little esprit du
corps. The fact s.there are are nc
distinctive principles left 10 either
party. Politics have degenerated into
mere personal intrigues. II the South
breaks up, as now seems likely, il
will be impossible to keep the two
parties together much Longer. IN
Y. Evening Post, Jan. 9th,
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

THAT BANK CASHIER. Trust our
Cashier said the Bank Director;
"why. I've absolute confidence in him.
He doesn't belong to the church,
dOesn't teach Suuday-school class,
isn't even temperance man. There's
Cashier you can rely on. He's a
man who likes, above all things, to go
fishing, and Sunday you'll 6nd him
starting out with his pole and a bottle
of whisky, and he vents his propen-
sity for wickedness by lying about
what he catches - Boston Post.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

FATHER rs GETTING WELL.-My dangh'
tiers say, "How much better father is since
he used Hop Bitters." lie is getting we'll
after his long suffering from disease de-
clared ineurable, and we are so glad that
he used your Bitters.-A lady in Roches-
ter, N. Y.-lUtica Herald.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

A fashion paper tells us that silken
hosiery is now all the rage in Paris,
with insertions OF portraits and me-
dalions of point lace" Fancy glanc-
ing al rJady-love's stockings and
fioding the portrait of-some other
tailow
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The abundance of herring ova
spawned upon the coast Of Labrador
has been reported by a Trustworthy
observer to be so great that he has
seen the shore covered with it to the
depth of two feet for several miles.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The whipping post bill was killed
by an appeal to prejudice. In the
barbaric days OF yore prejudice was a
powerful engine, and il seems to still
hold its power in the Kentucky Leg.
islature. II Lou. Democrat.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

II we were called upon. TO designate
a name that conveys meaning more
dishOnorable than dishonor, more de.
PRAYED than depravity, more imfam.
Gus than infamy-a name that, pro-
nounced in heaven, would thrill the
celestial hosts with horror; that utter.
ed on earth, would I'll mankind with
loathing; that, spoken in hell, would
cause every devil in the Internal re-
gions to blush with shame-the name
would be Stephen G.. Burbridge. -
breckenridge News.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

When you have a secret to commu-
nicate to a pair twins, be sure you get
them together, for you will find it diff
fcult to tell them apart.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

A new theory Of the so-callsd fas-
cination Of bird by snakes is that the
birds mistakes the snakes tongue,
which the reptile keeps in constant
motion, for lively worm, and watch
es il with the expectation of devour
ing il.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The editor of a Texas exchange
says he does not like turkey; that il
he can't have 'pOssum to celebrate with
he don't want any at all but his
neighbOrs still continue to lock up
their turkeys after dark. Some PEG
pie don't believe everything they read
in a newspaper. The editor cant
play "pOssum' on them that way
Texas Siitings.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The politician OF the insect world is
the flea. He is ever itching for place,
creates no end of disturbance, and you
never know where % find him.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

AT masquerade: "was it the
loud beating OF my heart, my darling,
that told you who | was dearS" muir.
INJURED he. "oh, no" she replied. 81
recognized your crooked legs.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Young lady, (caressing spaniel
81 do love a nice dog" Dandy.
(near hy.) Ali would | we're dogg'
Young lady (sharply.) "Never mind,
you'll grow"
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Mrs LivermOre Is lecturiug on
"The Boy OF To-day" who is in front
of the church waiting for The Com
lug Girl. - Danbury News.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Are blacksmiths Win live by iorg
ing, or carpenters who do little coun
ter.htting, any worse than men whc
sell iron and steelg
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The matchmaker cant afford to do a
cash business, because he makes all
his profits on time Wit aud Wis
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

A robber who Was seized TOR stealing
snuff. said that he was not aware of
any law that forbade man to take
snuH.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

A coal fire is a great comfort, but q
nutmeg often suggest a Crater. I'll De
trOit Free Press.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Mother, may I go down 10 skatef
Yes, my darling Julia,
but don't you try the hgure s,
For ~ Will surely fool you.
Ja,t A. you make the lightning vhifl
To ,hov your springy muscle,
The boys viii see a FOOLISH girl
sleigh-riding on her hustle.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

If Guiteau should be acquitted, ev-
cry man 10 the country who desires
thereafter to do mean act will swear
that he is "inspired. "-[Savannah
News. 1t will hardly be necessary
for him to swear to it.-[Lou. Dem.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20
TO- oar lED TO- MORROW


Though shadows robe the sky to-day,
And turns our Joy 10 sorrow,
Yet all the clouds will hresk away
And bring the sun Tomorrow.
Then WY should any one look .sd,
And mourn for hopes departed,
when Just hey odd us eyes are glad,
Prom which the tears are started.
Time In numberlne u YEAR.
May add day of sorrow,
But even this need bring no tears.
foT Joy viii come tomorro~,
Aud hearts may cling With Feeble powers,
To hopes that had been riven,
Yet age win bring ne brighter hours,
In thoughts Of rect aud heaven.
Then ever - our happiness
10 hslf-eclipsed by sorrow.
Look ~, aba hope 90, none the loo
Thstlo msy come to-morov.
And still be hopeful 20 the last
whatever may befsll us.
TiliJoy and grief alike are past,
Aud angels home shall call US.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

Some are born rich, others achieve
riches, while others become bank
cashiers.-T Bloomington (Ill) Eye.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

The new wedlock association ought
to pray for cold weather to make the
matrimonial market lively. Matri
mony seems very rose colored. but
Little he recks, Who to marriage aspirOs,
OF times when his meals are quite slack,
OF getting up early and king the nres,
Or, warming cold feet with his back
-lEvansvile Argus
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20
Two women called on Maine den.

Two WOMtn CaIItu Oh MdInH utH-
tist simultaneously, one to have all
her teeth extracted and the other only
three. The dentist mistakenly put
the latter under the influence of ether,
and rendered her toothless. A jury
will estimate the damage.
Semi-weekly interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1881-1905, 1882-01-20

A joke is not so durable as church.
bell. After told few times it is worn
out.
Custer chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, Black Hills, D.T. [S.D.]) 1880-1890, 1882-07-15

New York Tribune: In conversation
with a reporter Of the Elmira, New
York, Daily Advertiser few days ago.
Gov. Sherman, of Iowa, made the follow.
ing extraordinary statement: II saw
President Garfield day or two ago in
Cleveland You need not look atonish-
ed really saw him not his spirit,
but his own form and features. had
visited his tomb to do homage to the
spot where the martyr.president was
sleeping. The watchman in charge, on
learning whence came, and " no was.
asked me if would like to see the pre-
sident. was as greatly surprised as
you can be. He simply show ed me he
was in earnest, invited me into the tomb,
lscrewed and removed the lid from
the sacred casket, and there lay Gen.
Garfield before me-just as he looked
the day of his funeral-as if in weary,
unrefreshing sleep. l was surprised,
for, despite the emaciation of those
noble features, was at once struck with
their likeness to the general, as had
seen him alive. presume that years
will pass ere the preserving traces of
the embalmers work will have been re-
moved from all that is left on earth Of
Garfield. He was great man, and it
shows in his calm though pain-shrunken
features STILL"
The Cleveland Herald has confirmed
the accuracy Of Gov. Sherman's report,
and adds that it was Lieut.. Van Vliet Of
the tenth United States infantry. the
officer in charge of the detail of soldiers
guarding the tomb, who encouraged and
gratfied the governors CHASTITY curiosity.
Lieut.. Van Vliet surely hes a strange
conception of the duty he was ordered
to perform. He was stationed at the
tomb to protect, not to expose the re-
mains. 1t is to be hoped that it will not
be necessary to appoint guardian Of
the guard.