Daily Republican., 1882-08-17
HOt To BE Fooled.
le New.LondOn Telegram.

NOt To BE Fooled.
From The New.LOndOn Telegram.
Mr.. Josiah Smith, age fifty. FIVE, wa
born and brought up in the town o
Snlithville, Connecticut, where hi
father had been born and brought vi
before him. Neither circumstances MOI
inclinations had ever carried Mr.
Smith far from his native village, and
his mental horizon was bounded by thu
town limits. For pig obstinacy
and self-conceit, the man whose know
ledge of the world is gained in his OWL
back yard has few rivals. Mr.. Josiah
Smith was a bright and shining exam
pie of his class. 1t was his proud boasI
i, that nobody could fool him. To be sure
nobody in Smithville ever tried to OF
wanted to. Living apart from the tur-
moil and temptation Of the busy world
his acumen had never been submitted
to the sharp test of experience, and sc
lor fifty-fve years he had been able to
nurse the comfortable belief that he
was considerably smarter than his
fellow.mortals. "They can't fool me,
Mr.. Smith was accustomed to say with
consi derable unction, followed by ap'
Iplauding assent at the grocery store
where he traded.
Mr.. Josiah Smith was farmer, and
like other farmers who have city cous-
ms in New York, two years ago he re.
ceived one summer visit from his city
relatives. They stayed on the farm for
few weeks, displayed their Ignorance
of such fundamental principles as milk.
ing and moving, enjoyed the fresh air
and the novel experience, didn't fool
him, and went away leaving a cordial
invitation for him to return the visit
and come and see them in New York.
Mr.. Josiah Smith went this summer.
He spent the intervening two years in
getting posted. He reau an old guide
book and a cheap novel called "Lite in
New York, but most of all he read the
city column in his Tribune. OF all the
tricks and dOdges, that which most i'm,
pressed Mr.. Smith and that which he
regarded with the most infinite con.
tempt was that species OF confidence
game whereby the operator, recOgniz-
ing the victim as an old acquaintance,
lures him in TO some den to see him cash
a lottery ticket and leaves him penni-
less. Mr.. Smith when he thought Of
this simple ContriyanCe to catch the un. |
wary, waXed eloquent over the fools |
who will be 30 easily shared, and end.
ed by asserting again that they couldn't
fool him. Early this spring Mr.. Smith |
started for the metropolis. No trunk
trunks were sometimes lost; he carried
his modest wardrobe in an old.fash-
oned carpet-bag shaped like an invert-
NJ bellows, with brass lock of gener-
'us size and two large leather handles.
Then, with linen duster on his back,
me hand on his carpet.bag and the
'ther on his watch, and rigid determ.
nation on his face. he seated himself in
he cars. He resisted the blandish.
nents Of the train boy who fred at him
he customary round OF peanuts, litera-
ure and mixed candies. He resisted
he temptation to turn over and illus
rated paper which the boy laid on the
eat and look at the other side, fearing
hat such an act might give the boy
eht to demand the price OF the paper.
When they stopped ten minutes for re-
he took from the grip-sack .
hree hard boiled eggs and four slices I
bread, aud ate them in wary and
autious manner; he charged cars !
nder protest, and finally rolled into =
le Grand Cen 5ral Depot, past tue tall t
alton where the train dispatcher t
ends out over the network of rails
lst, south, north and vest the trains l
18th their weight of humanity, always v
lrging in and out from the great i
until the train stopped at
le other end of the huge station. Now
nong the city cousins who had visit. i
l Mr.. Josiah Smith was young John, b
New. York, and to young John was u
eputed the courteous TASK of meet 9
lg and greeting Josiah at the de.
OF. In
And there John was; but two years p
I'D altered young John both as 10 his a
othes and as to his physique 1t takes V
decade to noticably alter the cut of b
ousers in a small Country village, but 81
10 world moves faster in the city, and g
)ung Johns trousers had grown very II
nall indeed; he wore toothpick shoes, 3
I'd another hat from the tile of two 1
sars ago, and moreover be was culti- i
lting a slight mustache. Cousin l,
)siah didn't know him, but he knew o. y
)usin Josiah to every stitch in his raj. =,
ent. But young John had q pleasant II
I'd gained way with him, and 80 in O
cad Of calling out, "Hullo Cousin y
'siah!" he slipped airily forward, and ~ ~
fling his hat, said, "This is Mr.. Josiah n
NTH, l believer"
He wanted to make an impression; n
, did. y
The old man, mindful of the conf. =
'nca game, felt that this was his v
'pOrtunity; with the battle CRY fthe al
ew- Englander, "By Gosh" he swung e
oft the mighty carpet.bag and ex- q
aiming, "You can't fool me-" he ~ ~
ought it down on the head of John. Il
quarto Bible, pair of heavy shoes, Vi
hair brush aud other bric-a. brac 81 81
und in leather and cloth, and sup. q
emen ted by brass lock, makes no
can weapon. Young John dropped of
re bullock. There was crowd and NJ
me confusion, but when young John re re
d been mOpped into consciousness TT Us
ain, he explained matters. How or
er, young John is not quite SO airy 80
he was, and Josiah Smith has not al
en- heard during the entire summer to So So
Jert that "they can't fool him." tn IN
1t is believed that this little tale is sa
t without its moral, the extraction us
d application of which is left to the OF
lder. so IOl