The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1882-01-28

l am about to relate occurred, so that can now
speak of it quite calmly and with a temperance
and caution that insure accuracy. l should pre-
mise that there had been many accounts in the
newspapers at the time of the doings of burglars
In our quarter of the city; in fact, the air was
so filled with the sensational reports that it fur
nished the staple of conversation
OF course all this came to the ears of nv wife
as also to the ears of a robust but excitable
Swedish young woman whom we had in the
kitchen. This latter parsonage, indeed had he
come so abnormally alarmed upon the subject
that it was only with the greatest difficulty that
we could keep her from escaping back to her
native Scandinavia.
1t was one cold, dark night in winter | re-
member it well. l had been in bed two or three
hours. l was sunk in that first deep, refreshing
sleep of the night, every moment of which ia
worth it's weight in gold-a charm. a SMELL
which once broken, lost, or disturbed, could not
be recalled in all the after night was reveling,
I say, in the sweet, precious oblivion when sud
denly felt my wife's elbOw-I may say in pass
ing do not know much Of anat0my-but NV
wifes elbow has always seemed to me phenom-
enally sharp. Aroused to semi-conciousness, 1
bility, deafness and phlegmatic indifference,
which, as usual, proved of no avail. Repeated
and vigorous applications of pointed bone to
any part of the person must in time, overcome
any such purely negative resistance as feigned
uncOnsciousness. / was forced at last to ac-
knowledge the signal by an articulate groan.
"Philander"
"Hm-m."
"Get up, quick; there's somebody in the rOomm
"Fudge!"
"There is, tell you!"
"All right"
off you don't get right straight up, I'll
scream"
"Go ahead"
"There! d hear that?o
To my astonishment did hear faint sound
like the rustling or moving of clothes. For the
first time in many years started up and sprang
out of bed
By powerful imagination my feelings may
perhaps be feebly conceived, when 1 say that
struck full against the form of living man
cropping his way along by the side of my bed
The shock knocked the burglar down; he
uttered an involuntary groan as he sank under
the weight of my ayOirdupOis, and my wife
uttered screams that with favorable direction of
the wind might have been heard at the city hall
The situation was now critical l may say
am not coward, but have nerves and sens-
bilities that susceptible to outside influences
1 have prejudices against being chased by a
mad bull, run away with by frantic horse or
against stOrming battery There are things
would rather do than fight duel or have a
tooth out, and so l will at once admit that
did not find it at all agreeable tackling bur-
glar in the dead of night, in the confusion Incl
dent upon sudden awakening from sleep, and
with the expectation of feeling every moment
an upward thrust of cold steel on some part
of my exposed person.
For a few moments did what was certainly
the wisest and safest thing to do sat still upon
the struggling burglar, holding him clutched
firmly with both hands.
Directly my courage and presence of mind
returned; l became sensible that was stronger
than he 1 accordingly turned about, thrOttled
him and overpowered his hands
now felt that he was a slighter, much less
powerful man than I, and at once l became as
bold. I plumped him down IN
chair, shook him; gave him some vigorous
advice, and then set about dressing myself pre-
paratory to taking him in triumph to the station
house l had got as far as my trousers; l had
thrust one leg into that bifurcated garment;
poised the other to follow suit The burglar saw
his chance. He jumped up and dartsd from the
room He was right. If there was an awkward,
helpless, exasperating moment Tor
haste in mans life, it was when half way into
his trousers l kicked and plunged with the other
leg. l tried to get the garment on. L tired TO
get it off. Inmy moment Ofdesperaton-Wm
seemed an age-I made rash mental oatn tnat
would adapt petticoats for the rest OF my LIE.
trust that VOW is not registered against me.
1t length got ready and started in pursuit, ex-
9ecting had lost my prey. But he had met an
unforeseen obstacle Scandinavian Bertha, AWAKEN
I'd from her midnight sleep by my wite's screams,
md having but one thought in her mind ana
hat thought burglars" rose in quaking trepl-
lation, put on her Sunday bonnet and shoes, selz-
ID her valuables in her hand, and started down
tairs. She reached the landing just as the hap
ess burglar darted from my room. They colhded.
The sturdy Skald, driven at bay, seized her enemy
With desperate clutch, held him like an iron vice,
nd made the welkin ring with shrieks of terror.
For several moments he made futile attempts
o escape With one hand clutched firmly IN MS
lair and the other in his cravat, she held him
asst. At length, by frantic effort, he freed him.
elf just as l darted out Of my chamber door.
re- started wildly doyyp the stairs hut nv this