The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1882-07-14
AN INNOCENT JOKE.
How BOY Played Game or Flat Maca-
roni ON His Paterual Ancestors.

There is hoy out west who is SO fun Of
fun that sometimes II makes him ache. He
Is the same boy who, not long since, wrote
note TO his father, signed the name "Daisy"
TO II, and got the old man to stand on cor.
ner for two hours waiting for the girl. After
that scrape the old man told the boy that he
had no objection TO innocent jokes, such as
would not bring reproach upon him, aud as
long as the boy confned himself to jokes
that wouli simply cause pleasant laughter,
and not cause the finger of scorn TO be point
ed at parent, he would be the last one to
kick. So the boy has been for three weeks
trying to think of some innocent Joke 10
play on his father. The old man is getting
little near sighted, and his teeth are not as
good as they used TO be, but the old man
will not admit ii. Nothing that anybody
can say can make him own up that his eye
sight is falling, or that his teeth are poor,
and he would bet a hundred dollars that he
could see as far as ever. The boy knew
the falling and made up his mind TO demon
strate to the old man that he was rapidly
getting of his base. The old person is very
fond of macaroui, and eats it about three
times a week. The other day the boy was
in drug store and noticed in a show case
lot of small rubber hose. about the size of
sticks Of macaroni. such as is used on nurs-
ing bottles, and other rubber utensils. 1t
was white and nice, and the boys mind was
made up at once. He bought yard of it,
and took it home. When the macaroni was
cooked and ready TO be served, he hired the
table girl to help him play it Oh the old man.
They took a pair of shears and cut the rub
Der hose in pieces about the same length as
the pieces of boiled macaroni, and put them
in saucer with little macaroni over the
rubber pipes, and placed the dish at the old
mans plate. Well, We suppose if ten thou
sand people could have had reserved seats
and could have seen the old man struggle
with the India rubber macaroni, and have
seen the boys struggle to keep from laugh
ing, they wonld have had more fun than at
circus. First, the old delegate attempted to
cut the nacaroni into small pieces, and fail
ing, he remarked that 1t was not cooked
enough. The boy said his macaioni was
cooked too tender, that his fathers teeth
were so poor that he would have to eat soup
entirely pretty soon. The old man said,
"Never you mind my teeth, young man." and
decided that he would not complain of any
thing again. He took up couple Of pieces
Of rubber and one piece Of macaroni on
fork and put Them in his mouth. The mac
aroni dissolved easy enough, and went down
perfectly easy, but the fiat macaroni was TOO
much for him. He chewed on it for min
ute or TWO, and talked about the weather in
order that none Of the family shoIld see that
he was in trouble, and when he found the
macaroni would not down, be called their
attention to something out the window and
took the rubber slyly from his mouth, and
laid 1t under the edge of his plate. he was
more than half convinced that his teeth were
played out, but he Went on eating soIhe-
Thing else for while, and finally he thought
he would just chance the mararoni once
more for luck, and he stored away another
forkful in bis mouth. 1t was the same old
story. lie chewed like beaver, and his
eyes stuck out and his face became red, and
his wife looked at him as though afraid he
was going to die Of apoplexy, and finally the
servant girl burst out laughing aud went out
of the room with her apron stuffed in her
mouth, and the boy felt as though IL was un-
healthy to tarry too long at the table and be
went out. Left alone with his wife the old
man took the rubber macaroni from his
mouth and laid it OH his plate, and he and
his wife held an inquest over it. The wife
tried TO spear it with fork, but couldn't
make any impression Oh it, and then she
saw it was rubber hose and told the old man.
He was mad aud glad at the same Time,
glad because he had found that his teeth
were not TO blame, and mad because the
grocer had sold him boarding house maca-
roni. Then the girl came In aud was put on
the confessional, and told all, and presently
there was a sound of reyelry by night in the
wood-shed, and the still, small voice was
saying, 80, pa, don't you said you didn't
care for innocent jokes. or IT was ever
thus. A boy can't have any fun now days.
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