The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-04-04
FLEA BITES.

@s1llsl .s
CONE LEI Is ALL SCRATCH.
When party OF respectable Cincin-
natian> go to Paris to see the sights. it's
little mean in certain newspapers to
nOunce that Cincinnati hams have inyad
Paris in force. FIX.
Why call il mean Cincinnatian>
couldn't we'll go without their hams"
There are no Gainesborough hats big
enough to prevent an old man from seeing
the ballet at the rheater.-Ex.
True but one reason is. the ballet
generally make, better display on lodge
night than any other. and the Gaines
bOrough> and their owners are left at
home
-''Dwo "a, shoost enough, but dree vas
too blentv.' remarked Hans, when his best
girl asked him 10 take her mother along To
dance.
In the temple OF fame il Is said, there
is niche for every honest man.-Ex.
The "niches" must have a lonesome time
of IT,
A man who left Syracuse thirty-on
wears ago without a word to ANYBODY re-
turned last month and tried to make folks
think he'd only been fishing, anI was de-
termined to stay until he got bite.-Ex-
He probably got "bite" when he got
back, especially if hi, wife had married
again and had in her new "store" teeth
A widow in Japan who is willing to
think of matrimonv wears her hair tied
and twisted around long she'll hair-pin,
placed horizontally across the back Of her
head.-Ex.
A widow in America who is willing to
think of matrimOny doe, not need to bother
long with the thought. She just bangs"
and the men do the thinking for her, and
that is the kind Of 'hairpin" she is al
ter.
Oscar Wilde wishes to shake hands
with the author of Beautiful Snow"
Oscar should shire hail." for it will
take one to hold the numerous author"
On seeing house being whitewashed,
a small bow of three wanted to know If the
house was going to be shaved.
Which was pretty good one albeit
from a little shaver"
Miss Coward was married at Florence
the other day.-Ex.
The biggest Coward OF EN- all becomes
brave when it comes to matrimOny.
We are not going to tell the ladies that
We have a taste for the beautiful, and that
we have a nice pair of vases in our
sanetum.-Nevada Ledger.
Whether the editor means by the above
that he has tasted the beautiful and re-
ceived the vases as the price of his silence,
or whether he means to bride the beautiful
to come and get taste and receive the
vases as reward it is hard to determine.
oscar Wilde probably manufactured
that quaint expression of his, "unkissed
kisses just after calling on his girl with
his mouth puckered ready for business and
finding another fellow there.-Ex.
les. or it might be he was met by her
sold man" and he made such vigorous u;e
OF his loot that he thought his kissing days
would have to be postponed until he was
able to walk without carving a cushion
with him.
The Mexico Ledger saws that Ph~be
Couzins will lecture in that city, April I'd,
on the Mistakes OF Eve"-Ex.
All right, Phoebe; but one mis(s)take
Eve didn't make, which Phoebe would do
we'll to follow; she married, and was
Able to raise Cain
A fashion item says "marigold is
now popular shade of yellow.-Ex.
The ladies are all very partial to marry
Gold.
In the picture gallery.-YOung girl:
Say. mamma, when shall we come to an
other one Of those pictures where / must
shut NV eyes %-Ex.
"Iou hadn't better go but one eye on any
Of them, if you are so modest as that" was
the pert reply of the old lady, who had
not been reared in glass box