The evening light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1881-1883, 1882-07-22
EARLY ENFLIsH.

o~.. 80
EARLY ENFLIsH
The Religious Reporters Endeavor to do .
Picnic up In Medieval Style.
can old woman in spectacles told me to do
the church picnic up in medieval STYLE" OBJ
served the religious reporter, looking over his
notes and scratching his head obviously.
"A very clever idea," said the city editor.
nodding approvingiy. "rhe old woman had
some udgment. Just lay it out as she sug-
gests and you'll have an original account of a
pious fracas."
Goods wot, but ye ladyes faire and We
brave fellowes of their ilk did come from
divers places for to pic ye mic upon We grass,
and s'blood. but they did bust ye pyes and
gorge themselves Herewith, odds bodkins p
something in that line?" inquired the pious
reporter. "That's pretty derned central, if it
will do"
"No-o-o," mused the city editor. II should
Commence Ro by saying, Now ye ladyes of ye-.
1.-The Tenth Baptist" replied the reporter,
you've got to say: 'Ye ladyes of ye Tenth
Baptste Kirk did make We picnic Yesterday
out on ye Jamaica road in ye grove of Hans
Bannermann, goodly Dutchman of ye by'er
haildom stripe, because promised to run in
apuh for Hans. How would that style suit
you?"
Never mind, Hans" replied the city edi-
tor. well do the picnic first, and Hans will
drop in naturally"
"He'll drop in if he don't see that puff, and
don't you neglect it," growled the pious re-
porter Look here! How's this? 'Ye old
times rocks, Hans Bannermann, did bravey
on the yestereen when forth there Jared from
We kirk OF ye Tenth Baptystes such goodly
crowde OF maids and matrons IS ye $50 day
grove Eye Hans Bannermann had never set
eyes upon before. S'death! En-! How
does that strike your
Il tell you to let Bannermann Slide" re-
| lorted the city editor angrily. "Whoop up
the picnic FIRST Open up by saying. 'Perad-
| venture few of all ye seasons gay festivities
was in the way Of pleasure more TOTO, well,
to-"
There's good place to ring in odds bod
kins y" protested the reporter. "And say,
| 'by'r ladye' comes in some where, or that old
woman will snort now you listen She's got
| to have shot if you fire Bannermann. Sup
pose we say, "By'r ladye in ye gig lamps, but
We Tenth Baytystes did do themselves proud
at Bannermann's faire parke on yester For
goodly knights, we'll doubleted, and ladyes
faire, especially in her barnacles, did gayle
sport and gorge with all ye seasonable pyes,
| the which," 49,,
"Oh. give us rest!' pleaded the city edi-
tor. "Didn't they have anything but Banner
mann and pie?
| mot that saw" grumbled the pious re-
porter. why don't you let rue alone" Now
here we seasonable pyes. the which, odds
bodkins, did heavy Set upon the stomachs of
ye pic ye nickers, so that their gorge arose,
and they did groan- and rub themselves amid
ships, until ye brave Hans Bannermann, him.
self a host Of legions, did forth straighway
| dy, the which they did partake thereof, and
straiehtway they were made we'll so that they
went forth to their homes There you are,
We can sprinkle in in 's'death' and .s'blood'
and bye knightly sword all through it, and
you get your medieval business PATTI
"Was that all there was to it!' asked the
city editor. .'...
That's all they got" replied the pious re-
porter. There we're few side dishes for
Bannermann and me, but the rest only got
blackberry brandy. Say, will that do as I've
goti,?"
Il suppose so," muttered the city editor,
giving way. ''Don't forget to drop in those
other things about death and blood. What
was the old woman's name?'' ..r.
Il don't know" answered the reporter.
''but Pm going to call her Mrs. Wat Tyler
And as the city editor turned away the
piOus reporter run in onother line to the effect
that aye Hans Bannernann is all woole and
yarde wide and forty feete hygh without ye
knek, rate or wood-pecker hole, as is testy-
ho1o kS hr he
forgete it!'
You can't catch the modern reporter in a
matter of literature.