The Sunday herald. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1866-1887, 1882-12-03
CHARACTER STUDIES.

First and foremost s our mndiady. worthy
widow, gctting along In years, who Is snort stout,
industrious and she dbtcs on worthless son who Is a
spicc-dealcr-he generally carries n sample of his
waros u covel In his mouth and no busies himself
playing pool down at the National. This yonng man
is one o those versatile characters we sometimes SEQ
lie can play most any musical instrument passably
we'll; he can dance; he writes very good hand ho is
quick ut ngureS he sketch with crayons and paint
In Watcr OF oil; ho Is we'll read; he is witty uuick
SMART he sings suporbly; he can scrbbo verses play
chess, cards or checkorsi and yet he cannot and
never could mako q living. rc Just drifts along;
whcedcs out OF his poor mother all the small change
he wonts never gets Intoxicated quite, but is always
pretty "tnllN How many characters last like him
Gnd In cltosY
Aud then we have prim old bachelor, who dyes
his hair and beard aud Is rs regular as clock at all
times, lie has been In ONCE ever since Columbus
discovered America. lie came ho says, Of a 1ne
tamy-his mother cooked fot Mrs. NIadlson-apd we
would Ike to sec the political complexion OF the Gov e.
ernment change quicker than he can. When rolk
was President he was In favor OF the Mexican war.
when Taylor was elected he bought himself a bur
vest aud wore blue coat and brass buttons; after
Frank Pierce took the Chair he used to stand on tho
Avenue every afternoon as he rode by with JEFF
Davis, both In the saddle and raise his hat to them
when Old Buck assumed the purple he wore white
neck-cloth; when MIR. Lincoln came In he was down
on slavery; when Andy Johnsoa Topped he became
democrats when Grant succeeded Audy he thought
Amy w" whelp, and said so openly, as u free and
Independent citizen should; when the gentleman
from ohio took the helm OF State he denounced the
sage Of Ginmercy; during the Garfield Bialne-
Conkllng quarrel he sided with the Administration
until two certain shots rang out In the depot then
thought the stricken man had made great mis-
take, 50 aud when he died at Elberon he kne,o be had
been In error then, and he threw up his hat for the
Incumbent, This old gentleman is very precise and
nSSy-walks Just so many hours day, sleeps Just 80
many hours, reads Just 80 many hours and goes to
his meals on tho minute. lie has occupied the same
little room for many years, and winter nights IN,
makes prc with Just many sticks in his fireplace
warns himself nicely, keeps his eye on his old FASH
Toned l's-eyc watch, and goes to bed at nine ex-
acty There Is story extant that his watch stopped
once and he was nearly a minute and a half late I'm
getting between his Sheets and this gross rreguarty
sahVa'eu hlm' but we don't believe It, lie goes to
his ofcc and leaves 1t precise time Once upon A
time one OF the boarders had her young married
sister to spend the day with her and she brought her
oaoy with her-a very quiet, fat dumping with
oig eyes and plump ogs-and, lust for mischief they
put the baby to sleep In the old bachelors ROOM and
"neh he came IRON his onice and saw the little one
asleep in his bed he tainted aud fell down the front
stairs.
And then we have maiden lady som ewhere be.
'''''' "'p "hu -HNb years Ol aye, VINO be-
lieves In mesmersm, sprituasm. and woman suf-
frage. She Is In ONCE and has thin Inns and soantv
hair and is prOudcr OF her father having been dea
con thah she could he had he been Senator She ia
agloat consumer OF tea, and makes pet of shock
'hSly uisSipated old torn-cat, who always carries
hight-kcy and ho is chronic serennder This
maiden lady Is down on widows and married women
ana THINKS they should all be discharged from on,ce.
she pretends to be acquainted with the Senators and
har intn AMI Al,
influence. She is built something like hat rack
but with more sharp corners, and when she retires
although she sleeps In the third story front ROOM she
closes her blinds and draws her curtains with great
care Tor fear some horrid man might peep. She for
many years bound shoes In a factory up North for
Two dollars and half week. but now she yrumbes
because the Government will pay her but seventy
five dollars month.
Ana then we have a widow AT our house far fair
anu forty plus ten, who has lttlc income which she
multiplies by six whenever she refers to IT, she ia
chock-full OF gush, makes friends In AN hour and
cuts them dead In two or three days. she often con-
SUITS III very confidential way, the bachelor about
her Investments, and twice she bought
tickets FOR the opera, and told him they were given
10 her by agenteman connected with the press, but
they could not DO used unless she had an escort In
deed she has lshed for the bachelor IN many WAYS,
but he has never nbbled. The maiden lady watches
these little manmuvres with the eye Of a hawk and
has come to the conclusion that the widow is an
'artful thing.h This Widows husband was a very
gallant 0iicer during the war, and punished fearful
amount OF commissary,' ~ which punished him to
such an extent he died in tent full of serpents and
the Government granted her pension.
And then we have n gentleman about thirty-Gve
years of age who has mania for Joining societies.
lie Is Il Mason and an Odd Fellow and he belongs
10 the knights of Pythas the Elks, the Heptasophs
the Royal Arcanum, the United order OF the Golden
Gross. the Drulds, the Legion of Honor the brother
hood OF the Union, the Independent Order of Me-
chanics, the Changers, tho JOnadabs and we don't
know what else. Indeed he In a high state of
disgust once because the colored people would not
permit him 10 join the Galean Fishermen and the
Sons and Daughters of ReDecca. There Is nothing
going on, public or private, but he figures In II In
conspicuous way. Should any prominent man be re-
ceived you will find him on the committee Should
big man die Ee Is sure to be a pa-bearer. lie is
one OF Inc Dest-heartcd fellows In the world, and
takes the greatest interest In everybody's troubos:
delights In assisting themwill get out of his bed in
lhe dead oi the coldest night to lend helping hand
to a brother, but he flies into passion should his
wife ask him to do errand for her. and she seldom
sees him from dinner-tne till midnight and she
hasn't had new dress in ten years.
And then We have gentleman who Is rapldly
running TO seed. He broken Shoes but al
wars carries u cane; his Clothes glisten like glass
and even In summer he buttons mn IN his chin
His laundress never comes for bis Iiuan I'm, no .,,
he takes IL to her Occasionally our loudIody ,tnte
for her board money but he onets her Inv telling ner
about his ~ Claim ), ue has In r,ct hoo, hot
Oh that claim far the mast thirty v.,rs ,I b ,,iI
probably live ON II for thirty wears Longer
And then we have n luud roIli,kIng vn,,n, f.,lo,v
about eighty AMI -twepty wars n,a who bos a ,,
old daddy in New York. who ia a nIu,ono,r, .,rI
very luIserly but has Iarpe pnliticai ,nnuancs T
reared this how i'm the cIosest ,v,v. cave him onIv
education enouph ia calcuIot, interest and ,,rnh,
him from the cradle that a doar a dav saved and
nut ont al interest eoinnouu1ed holr vearv ,yonId
amount To nm im,nensa snn, I'm GTtv vs,ro M, ,ho
tree didn't incline as IN, r,,her hsnt tho t,,,ont,
the contrary indeed. AIthouyh the old gnntIe,non
made this hoy work ike a frroio, I'm be ,v,s on.-
and-twenty and nover nIlnvei him 3, cant onondi,
monev whsn be ca,,a ~ hio ,,aio,t,, no ,,ir,a 90.
very hadlvron ,y,a,, sron ho,o 49,, ~ 800 Wv
hack rohhed bis f,,h.r ,ya,, W, s,ot ',an
Kinds NJ ,ronhle aud b,, m Ia, -, o,', ''
finally as he yyas goo1 for ro,r,na also NJ, 'a,,
turned ont n hard. vorti,g f,i,hS,I o,, o,,, Iii,
nine children and an invalid VITA and nrt ,hI vo,
man in his place Now bc koens nm n corrosnon,ann,
ON the sly win his f,thar,s nhvsic,,u no Ia T., ar,
uneasy aLout N, old gentlsman,s haa,,, ,, o,,aI,
wonders n there ia n case on rerord uhar, :, ,,,,
lived forever
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