Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1882-12-29
"HaSAAD" THE Wax W0aAN.

HESh 80 lhE N Az WU-aAH.
What was the doctor at yo,u
h"u~r FOR this m"rning'" asked the
grocery man. is you ma sick?"
No: ina is worth two in the bush
It's pa that amt we'll. He is having
som" trouble with his digestion. You
80" liH went to the exposition with
me a. guide and that is enough 10
ruin amy mans digestion. Pn is
near sighted. and l.n said hr wanted
me to 20 along and show him things
Well. ! never had ST. much fun since
pa fell out of the boat First. | made
hlm jump clean across the aisle. there
where the stuffed tigers are. by the
fur place. | told him the keeper WAS
just coming along with some meat to
feed the animals. and when they
smrlled the meat they just clawed
things. He run against show case,
and then wanted to go away He
said he travelled with circus when
he WIS young, and no one knew the
dangers of fooling around wild ami
mails better than he did. Well, you
would Il died to see pa there Nv the
furniture place where they have got
beautiful beds and chairs. There
was blue chair under the glass ease,
all velvet, and IL sign was over it tell
ing people to keep their hands
off. Pa asked mo what the sign was
and l told him it said ladies' and
gentlemen are requested to sit in the
chairs and try them. Pa climbed over
the railing, and was just going to sit
down on the glass showcase over the
chair, when one of the walk around
fellows with police hats took him by
the collar and yankcd him back over
the railing. and was going to kick
pas pants. Pa was mad to have his
coat collar pulled up over his head,
and have the set of his coat spoiled
and he was going to sass the man
when told pa that the man was
lunatic from the asylum, that was on
exhibition, and pa wanted to go away
from there. He said he didn't know
what they wanted to exhibit lunatics
for. He went up stairs to the place
where the young woman makes pan
cakes out of self rising flour, and puts
butter and sugar on them and gives
them away. Pa said he could eat
more pancakes than any man out of
Jail, and wanted me to get him some.
| took a couple of pancakes and tore
ont piece of the lining of my coat
and put it between the pancakes and
handed them to pa with a paper
around the pancakes. Pa didn't no
tice the paper nor the cloth, and it
would have made You laugh to see
him chew on them. | told him |
guessed he didn't have as good teeth
as he used to. and he said, Never
you mind the teeth and he kept on
till he swallowed the whole business:
but he said he Guessed he didn't
want any more But | thought | |
should split when pa wanted n drink |
of water | asked him if he would
rather have mineral water. and he |
said he guessed it would fake the
strongest kind of mineral water to
wash down them pancakes: SO L took
him to where the fire cxtinguishers |
are and got him to take the nozzle of |
the extinguishcr in his mouth and | !
turned the faucet. l don't think he
got more than a quart of the stuff |
ont of the saleratuS machine down |
him, Tut he rared right up and said |
he'd be condamned if he believed |
that water was ever intended to
drink and he felt as though he should
bust, and just then the man who
kicks the big organ struck up, and
the building shook and 1 guess pa
thought he had busted. The most |
fun was when we came along to
where the wax woman is. They
have got wax woman dressed up to
kill, and she looks just as natural as
if she could breathe She has n
handkerchief in her hand, and as we
came along told pa there was Il lady
that seemed to know him. Pa is on
the mash hisself and he looked at |
her and smiled and said good even
ing and asked me who she was. / |
told him it looked to me like the girl
that sings in the choir at our church,
and pa said course it is and he went |
right in where she was and said,
Pretty good show. isn't itp and put |
out his hand to shake hands with |
her, but the woman who tends the |
stand came along and thought pa was
drunk, and said, Old gentleman, l |
guess you had better get ont of here.
This is for ladies' only Pa excused
himself to the wax woman and SAID
he would SEQ her later Peck's
Sun.