davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1882-04-20

"Goodncss gracious! says Miss Mary,
III it ain't the Major hisself'
Yes, says 7, 'nnd you know you
promised to keep my Christmas present as
long as you lived I"
The girls laughed themselves almost to
Death, and went to brushing off the meal as
iust os they could, sayiu' they was agwine
to hang that bag out every Christmas till
they got husbands, too"
Of course Major Jones married his
sweetheart, and, os we learn from his book
OF travels, published many years afterwards,
the union was in ovcry respect a happy ono.
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1882-04-20
Henry Wattcrson in Augusta Chronicle. I
MAJOR JONES' COURTSHiP.

1t was doubtless the publication of Prof.
Lo1gstreet's Georgia Scenes" in 1910,
which suggested continuous story upon
the same stage Of action, and in 1912
"Maj or Jones Courtship' appeared. The
author Of this homc!y, natural aud anus.
lug fiction, Mr. W. 4. Thompson, an editor
III Savanuah, is still alive. In 1913 he
followed his first production with "Maior
Jones Sketches Of Tra:cl" which possess
value as contemporaneous pictures beyond
End above their humof, abundant as that
Is. The "Cour,>hlp," hcwcvcr, is novel,
originality meant as q travcstie, to which
time has Lent a sort Of pathos. 1t is a
graphic po,traiture of the Interior life of
the South. Rough and ready as the farce
is, il is never vulgar Its charaters are
few, simple aud virtuous. 1t deals with
clean hom,spun. It carries the mind back
to the old brick church, the Innocent pic
mic, the rural Fourth of July celebrations
and the Christmas frolic
Joseph Jones, only son of the widow
Jones, living near the village of pinoslle.
! IN Georgia, Is wcII-to- do young farmer
lie is in love with NJ ry Stallins, daughter
OF tho wIhow Stallins, near ncighbor.
Joseph has grown up on the plantation, an
honest, ailectionate, moral young man;
Mary has gone off to boarding school and
comes homo a belle. The adventures are
bounded on the one side by the barn yard,
and on the other side by the hearthstone.
Over all pair of rugged roof trees cast
their kindly shade he story runs along
like brook, without effort or conocalmcnt.
There is no william in the yiccc-on!y
would>be wit, called Cousin Pete, who is
Introduced as tease The trbulatlons of
the lovers arc very slight; but there is
throughout the narrative u nn.ur.nr,
which, being nowhere strained {
Is really captivating. As an example, |
cannot forbear quoting the culmin,t
the courtship. You will understand that
our hero had had many troubles and trials
bringing himself to the point of popping
the question; that, although he is almost
sure OF his sweetheart, he cannot muster
courage enough to make direct proposals;
that everybody is 10 the secret and approves
the match. How tho deed was iaally done
he shall tell himself:
"Chrlstmas como, [ PIT on my noo
suit an shaved my fac n. *
smoothln' s. iron au' skipped 'v"r
Stallinscs. AS soon as / went iuto the
par!or, where they was sittin' around the
fire, Miss Ca,'ine and Miss Kcsiah both
laughed rite out
:" Thar, now siz they, Il knowcd it
would be Joseph
"'What has | done. Miss Car'Iine,
saysJ.
"'You como under sisters chicken bone
says Miss kcsiaIl, IAN for my part |
blcnvo she knowcd you was comin' when
she put it over tho doro.'
"'No, | didn't didn't do no siob
thing, now says Miss Mary, blushin' rod ,
like summer rose.
"'No matter says Miss Car'linc, you
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1882-04-20
Geographical.

Goa what side of the map do you look
for the Nor,h?"
son the cold side, of course.'
"Nhat is the North pole?"
"a place where fish and fools hte the
year round"
"Whut arc meridian circes?"
'rhc marks left on the ice by new
beginner on skates. Try it once and be-
convinced"
"What arc parallels of latitude?"
Compromising with official embezzlers.
Plenty of latitude and heaps of parallels in
this country"
"What does the term climate signify?''
"About fourteen different sorts of weather
mixed together anh ladcd out 10 Quantities
to snit I"
"liow many zones are thcre?'
"Dead loads. You cant throw brick
bat without knocking one over. They arc
unusually tame this year"
''liow is the year dvided?"
"loto four seasons, called spring eummer.
fall and winter. You can have the whole
four of 'em at once by sending your ad-
dress on postal card.''
"Why is the climate hot in tho torrid
zone?"
"Bult that way to spite plumbers and
ice Dealers"
GLOW many degrees could you travel
West of any given mcrijian?"
''Up to $50, if the free pass held out"
(Which is tho highest office in tho
United States"
"ilotcl clerkship at Saratoga in July."-
Detroit Free Press.
The Emperor William, on his eighty
fifth birthday just passed, made some
serious remarks concerning himself. Ho
recognized the fnct that any one who had
reached his eighty sixth year was far
beyond the ordinary range of life and
hcpe' that it God granted him moro days
still he would not ortiye himself. A
long life vas only to be wished for when
accompanied with strength; but. ncverlhc-
less, trusting in God. he entered new
year The Empress Augusta gave her
husband a table and set Of chairs painted
with flowers by her own hand; while their
children celebrated the occasion by gifts of
bronzes, porcelain and flowers.
WASHINGTON, April 1l--Thc cold spap
extended "lI over tho North yesterday from
Delaware to Iowa and Michigan Snow
fell 10 Michigan and Iowa three-quarters of
mn inch deep aud tormed at sume places in
Dcl,ware, Considerable anxiety is felt for
the fruit crop.
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1882-04-20
81 HbansyLEsc Es. 8s
PASSENGER DEpARTM ENT.

On and after February Goth, 1852, tho
Passenger Train Service on The Atlanta and
Charlotte Air Line Division will be as fol-
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1882-04-20

PorrsvILLE, Pa, April ]1.-A malig-
hant form of scarlet fever has broken out
at Cressona within few days, one family
losing it's children, consisting of four boys
and two of eDoiher family who were 10
good health yesterday died this morning.
The citizens called q meeting and to-day
all the schools were closed. The liberal
use of disinfcctants has been ordered and
great uncasiDcss is felt. The physicians
seem unable to cope with tho disease,
since it terminates fntaly within twenty
four hours Of the appearance Of the first
eymptop.
DENVER, April | l : George NJ. Chilcott,
Of Pueblo, wos to-day appointed United
States Senator to succeed Teller.
WAsHINoToN, PENN, April II Tho
swings bank cushicr's account falls short
100000 to $60,000 Grain speculation is
given as the cause.
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1882-04-20
WESTW ARD.
Mail and Express.

Arrive Atlanta l 10 p NJ ~ 05 A NJ
II. NJ r.. TALCOTT, General Manager
I. Y. SAGE, Superintendent.
4. POPE, Gen. Pas. ~ Ticket Agent.
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
FACTS FOR THE CURIOUS.

- .-Yv. uarvu uus peen exnlpited by
q Dresden matchmaker. The paper is
prepared in such manner as to render
tho watch aR serviceable rs those in
general use.
Italy is the only country in Europe
where all famous men are expected &c
sit in Parliament, and where the hum.
blest citizen would rather vote for
great composer or general than for
local celebriety.
In Sweden about one.half the popu.
lation annually consume 140 to l7C
pints OF spirits each. The Sweies have
deteriorated in stature aud strength
new diseases have appeared, and old
ones increased.
A lawyer of ST. Paul, Mimi, is cred.
tied with having made the Longest
speech yet recorded, having spoken q
total of 29i hours in fonr days, deliver
ing himself Of over 222, 800 words III
that time. He closed his argument 70,
lack OF time, not words.
When the tiist census CT Ceylon was
taken, in 1871. it WIS common belief
among the natives that the object was
to discover the number of unmarried
to Europe, whose male popn lation, They
sud, had been destroyed by great war
The great altar Of Olympia described
Ly Pansauies, VAS fvrnod entirely by
the ashes ot the victims sacrificed t.
Jupiter. Alter every sacrifice the
priests noistt ned the ashes with water
from the Alpheu4, and smeared thc
altar with Them, and 30 enlarged 1t thai
during ten centuries, the structure
gained l2j feet i. circuit and twenty
two il leiEAt.
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
The Bear in n Qunudnry.


A polar bear navigating the mid.sea
upon the mortal part of @ late lamented
walrus, soliloquized in substance, as
follows: "Such liberty of action as
am afflicted with is enough to embarrass
any bear that ever bore. l can remain
passive, and starve, or 1 can devour my
ship and drown. 1 am really unable to
decide" So he sat down to think it
over. he considered the question in
all its aspects, until lie grew quite thin
tuLnUu Ii 0rST and over in hia min i
until he was too weak to sit up, medi-
tated upon it with constantly decreas-
ing pulse, rapidly falling respiration.
But he could not make up his mind,
and finally expired without having
como to decision. 1t appears to me,
he might almost as we'll have chosen
starvation at venture,
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
Taking the Oath,

The form Of oath customary in taking
Office in the principal civilized countries
Of the world may be interesting. Here
is pretty full list:
Bavalia-I swear =. . 80 help me Goa
and His Holy Gospel.
Denmark promise and swear.
So help me God and Ills Holy Word.
Greece--I swear ir the name of the
Holy and Consubstantial and Indivisi-
bio Trinity.
HesEe-D e-Darmstalt I swear. 80 help
mo God.
Saxe-Coburg and Baden--I swear.
So help me God.
Portugal-I swear on the Holy Cos
pels.
Prus5ia-T swear by God. the A.
mighty and OmniScient $50 help me
God.
Saxony--I swear 10y Almighty God.
Ser vial swear oy one God and with
all that ia according to law most sacred
and in this world dearest so help
me God in this and that other world.
Spain--Aiter swearing the deputy on
the Gospel the president Gays: "Then
may God repay you; but if you fail
may lie claim 1t from you.'
Sweden and Norway--I president or
vice-president only swear before God
and His Holy Gospel. -. Il Will be faith
full to this oath as sure rs God shall
save my body aud soul
Switzerland In the presence Of AL
mighty God l swear. 80 help me
God.
United States--I do solemnly swear
.... so help me Col.
In Bavaria nor Christians omit the
reference to the G .,pel. Ia Holland
and the United Staics eiiirmaiion is
optionsl. In Prussia aSd ia Ssitzsr
land Affirmation is permitted 10 those
who object on religious grounds to the
oath. In Austria pro,liss is in every
case substituted Tor an OATH In Bel
gium md lta'y the a s'inratiou is used
without any |. eis-ic =, ie, ence, and IL
France an l.o'an.nia, tns German
Heich'teS, sni ~ dri.a les in Sweden
and A0iwa' osith,-r o...h or affirmation
is demand, Il
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09

studio-door opened, and in tripped
Kate, leaning upon the arm Of good
looking yonng gentleman.
"Why, it's unclel" she cried, radiant
II. Dear uncle, let me introduce my
husband, Colonel Catesby. We were
married this morning"
hir. Dnrant pnt on his spectacles.
You've lost no time" said he drily.
"Because Colonel Oatesby is ordert d
to the Floridian frontiers at once" ex-
planned Kate, ''and leaves tomorrow. 1
made his acquaintance ct tho Art
Rooms, and"
"Ah, yes" said Mr.. Durant. $50
when Love comes in, Art has to 90 to
the wall, eh?'
"What is Art compared to Love, I'M
cle?" cried enthusiastic Kate, while
Colonel Catesby stood looking on in a
sort OF idolatrous admiration. "But, all
the same, shall take my designing tools
to Florida with me, and prosecute my
profession among the orGnge-groves
and palm-thickets, while John is On duty
at the barracks"
% Id dare say" said Mr., D,GEriant drily.
must admit. You've done we'll at your
-aheml-careers, and you've got q
good husband apiece. 1 don't believe
you could have done better it. you had
adopted my platform"
"And you forgive us, dear unclo?"
pleaded Eda, caressingly.
"Yes," said Mr. Durant, sI forgive
you; and I'll bestow my blessing upon
you-all three of you.'
"All six of us you mean, uncle" said
Kate, mischievously.
'Just as you choose to have it," said
MIR. Dura.t.
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
Stubborn lnteerlty.

A dispute from q singular oanse took
place al the Office of hantcr In the
Ohaussee d'Ant;n, Paris. NJ. hcujlnin
f., the cashier, who has E;l-d TIA, Ciice
for tho last twenty-five years. Was at
his post, whea cniieciirS clerk named
Pierre Doulley, presented himself WITH
n draft for ten thousand faacs, drawn
by London banker. The notes were
counted ont, and the man lcfs tho placs.
In few hours he returned, and said to
the CASHIER
"There is little mistake between US,
monsieur there is a difference of one
thousand francs in our account"
"I never make mistakes" replied the
cashier. Indignantly; "fOr twenty-five
years my balance has always hcen cor
rect"
'Dut the error is against yourseli," "
raid Doudley, "as You have given me
one thousand francs too much; | am as
honest man as you are; have been
employed as collecting clerk for thirty
five years in the same house. There is
your note. will n 1t take it."
"Insolent fool" cried the cashier; 81
regard any man rs an enemy who wishes
to prove to my employer that ] am cap
able of making mistake. Take the
note, monsieur, or I will turn you out
of the placel"
Pierre Doulley was not thus to be
repelled, and from words the parties
came to blows; but the clerks of the
house fastened to separate them. The
cashier, not wishing to aEow an error
which he would have regarded as q
stain on his long established reputation
for correctness, was fain to put mp Will
the loss OF the note, and Pierre Doulley
carried the one thousand franc note tC
the mayor of the reimbursement, to b'
distributed among the poor.
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
HUMOROUS.

The quail is timid bird, but it gen.
orally dies game.
The principle Of the spring trap is
found in the jaws of the dolphin.
Cant" says Emerson, ''is useful to
provoke common sense" II is also
useful, with an apostrophe, when a
doubtful friend askes you to lend him
So.
II want one Of those long felt hats,
papa" said pretty girl to her father.
The indulgent father forked over the
money, and her head now fills the long.
felt want.
An exchange prints On article entitled,
"How to Distinguish Smallpox" But
no one wants to distinguish smallpox.
What the public want TO know is how
to extinguish it.
Paris advertisement sFoe eale--s
monkey, n cat and two parrots. Ad-
dress Nine. x, Rue. As the
lady is about to get married she has no
further use for taese animals
A German paper says a young woman
is like a letter not yet posted. The
father Of the young woman has proba-
bly, informed the G. man paper that ii
takes good many stsmps to get her
of.
1t is asserted over and over that anx.
iety shortens life, but when a chap sees
another fellow feeding his girl sand.
wiches at picnic is he going to sit
down and bid his soul be calm !! Not by
boot.jack.
agriculture is on t1e decline in
Austria," read farmer Longcrop. 'I
should think it would be-" answered his
wife; didn't I hear you say the othe,
day that Austria had G0,000 men in the
field, and amt that enough to trampls
down all the crops, I'd like to knowi'
Game: johnny ION his way to a par.
ty)-"Oh, aunty, won't it be joiIyT
The fun and the gamos2 Don't you
like parties ?" Aunt Annie--"Yes, dear,
I like the parties, but l don't go SO
much for such games as you little
chaps" Johnny-"Ah, forgot then
big chaps are the games you go for
now London Fun.
'You have distinguished company
here" remarked old MacShod.
deigh, who was the first to make his
appearance at the select supper given
by his city friend. "Distinguished the
deuce |" said the host "they are the
walters. Very few of The guests have
yet arrived" 1t was mistake that
might be made Mt almost any select
supper on the English plan.
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
Inst Upon the Roll.

cue sllh NJ tlic Opeu NluuOW on OAlD1 . Iteih-
Der day,
And ont on the mead before her she watches
the girls at play;
gentle breeze blJws on Ler face anil kisses
her locks Of snow,
And she thinks OF Tho days when che was
young, seventy years ago.
The fielcs are grocn as they were then, and the
big old rocks as gray;
The land and sky are az fair to see, the sun has
as mild ray;
The drowsy kline res. on the hill, the sheep skip
to and fro,
just as they dill when she was young, seventy
years aso.
The mi hmsid trgs her foan,ing pail with
rudy stregh ami viii,
The cowboy, in his pracclcss gslb, Licks dogs
TO kcepilem s,ill.
The housewife biri rhirpa round tie tsvus and
scohis ber iirant mere.
Who dives 10 the rr'unI and q'utk retains,
bearing thy LAit.
The sturdy youth, with dancing cyc- AMI tho
vi-,or OF lusty yeins,
Jumps On the cot an DER the fence, to saow
no fear restrain;
Full well he knows that hcighhor's rosc il
Watching bclinl tree,
And her maiden p;iI.. at lives fall tide, fol
lows him over TIE lea.
The tawny West falls on tho mead, anl tie
c:iiliren homvwgfd lly,
For now hey see the whizainS bat AMI hear tie
sac ch-owl's cry;
The jumlain cuil. str ho rosy chtak., enl Ear
with lau, her poal-
For each one knows, as she wlirilg Gos=,
there's "A goblin at herhcc's.
Down on the pines, with their haunted heals,
the ghosts of evening FIJI.
And the phantom touch OF dire am too much
. on the qnickening sei.ses pail;
TOT lnNisIOtS '.-.~.s -.ense crO tuC.C, ectN
fear Alone
And as rount hey fly they cheat tie eye, a:.I
down OIL lie heart lie pioGc
She looks at hor shrivelcd fingers, anl ehe
smoothes the wrinhed h"nl,
And the old, old love comes bAcs agan IT, she
studies the golden baAl;
That dear cid ring is loose ani lin since fre;
lac placed it there,
And ut loves shrine he said, :" be mine. and
knelt with her in prayer.
Eighty years joys and tears through times
sad chambers moan,
And still she hears in memory's ears q once IA
miliar tone;
In long. sweet notes to her it floats. and It tells
Of the olden time,
When love was strong and life song and hope
was in its primo.
A little peyona inc p.Ig .o4-., .. ... s....- -
yonder HILL
Her dim eyes mark the gravestones where
those she loved are STILL
And her thoughts have silent nursing, and her
soul silent grief;
nnds relief
And her hearts as light as the morning, with
wings of a soul made free,
And away, away to her lovel once IN wings Of
love she'd fee;
And the God she adores SO humbiy, and the
Christ she loves go well.
Will take her soon to the waiting ones, beyond
life's weary spell.
And her staff is lifted slowly and she moves
around with care
For her darlnSs now are slecping-she might
wake then unaware;
Anl she gropes around to find them and TO
bless them in her soul,
When whisper comes" We wait mother;
you are last upon the roll"
--H.gh =. MeIel HoH
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09

A Tucson (Arzona) letter says
"The great attraction of the evening is
the gambling pavilion, which occupies
almost one entire side of the plaza.
All around the building is promenade
and along this walk are the gambling
tables. Faro, roulette, monte, chusets,
chuck -a-luck and dozen other games
that only the sporting fraternity have
names for are represented. At times
the whole building is crowded and il
is with difficulty that one can get
close enough to some Of the tables to
make bet or even see what the game
is. At the monte games five cent
piece may be seen waiting its turn for
better or worse alongside Of hundred
dollar bet made by some one who is
flush and who is tapping the bank.
The roulette tables seem to bo the
favorites. One evening l counted five
in full blast. There were eager, ex-
cited crowds around each game. 1t is
mistake to suppose that only gamb.
lers and the lower classes indulge in
gambling. Everybody here does it,
from tho most prominent official and
merchant down to the poorest lsborers." :"
The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1882-06-09
lntipathy 10 Cats.

"Many years ago there was lady
who had q most intense dislike to cats,
so much so tia. were there one in the
room when she entered, she would be
obliged to leave Immediately, such an
effect had it upon her nervous system.
On one occasion she was invited to dine
with the narrator's family in the corn-
try, but she declined, because she knew
that there were cats on the premises
be strictly incarcerated sho consented
to come, and the three cats belonging
to the house were duly shut up. During
the dinner she was seen to be very Tn
comfortable, and to look very pale, a9d
on being asked the matter, she said that
she was sure there was cat in the
room. Assurances that this could not
possibly be the case were of no avail,
and on search being made, cat was
found actually sitting under her chair
She rose Immediately, and lett the
table; and passing down tho dining.
room toward the door she also passed
across small cupboard door opening
in the wall, through which the dinner
was served directly from the kitchen.
Ac she passed this the second cat OF the
establishment jumped through it into
the dining-room. scream OF horror
burst from the poor lady, and she was
led away fainting in the drawing. room.
The time of year WAS such that the win.
dow Of the edrawing-room was open, and
it was so made that it reached nearly
down to the floor. and not much absve
the lawn outside tie house. While the
poor lady was being attended to by aid
Nf IAtt ,.,l al,
tives, the third cat OF the establishment,
jumped in at the window This was
too much to be borne by such pecu
liarly constituted nervous system, and
she begged to leave the house immedi.
ately."
The above, from Chambers Journal,
is published under the title of !" Mental
Prescience." which is misnomer. 1t
is not a mental operation, but physi-
cal infrmity that makes some persons
conscious OF the presence OF a cat, even
when they do not see or hear it. The
in6rmity is classed by physicians and
treated in medical books under the
name Of scat asthma" and is as really
disease, or, at least, rs peculiar as the
hay-fever or the rose-cold. The efiiu-
vium from o cat produces upon those
who arc subject to it an effect that is ir.
resistible. We knew an eminent cler-
gyman who would faint if he were but
q few moments in room where a cat
was concealed. He was once observed
to wander in his expressions while lead
ing in prayer at a meeting in private
house. At the close Of the meeting he
remarked that a singular sensation came
over him at the time, and he felt as if
his enemy were near him. 1t was fully
explained on his learning that cat had
come into the room just at that mo-
ment. We have known cases OF the an
tipathy of cats to particular persons, OF
their power to iniure them, which are
quite as remarkable. Notwithstanding
tho story OF Dick Whittington's success
through his cat, the general usefulness
Of the race, especially in cities, is an
open Question. .-Nei9 York Ob'crser.