Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1882-08-31
His Ma has Got Home.

/ n ID
when is your ma coming back2'
asked the grocery man, of the bad boy,
as he found him standing on the side
walk when the grocery was opened in
the morning, taking some pieces OF
brick out of hls coat tail pockets.
20, she got back at midnight, last
night said the boy, as he eat few
blue berries out of case. "That's
what makes me up SO early. Pa has
been kicking at these pieces of brick
with his bare feet, and when came
away he had his toes in his hand and
was trying to get back up stairs on
one foot. Pa hain't got no sense.
81 am afraid you are terror, said
the grocery man, as he looked at the
innocent face of the boy. "You are
always making your parents some
trouble, and it is wonder to me they
don't send you to the reform school.
What deviltry was you up to last
night to get kicked SO this morning?'
mo deviltry, just a little fun. You
see ma went to Chicago to stay week,
and she got tired, and telegraphed she
would be home last night, and pa was
down town and / forgot to give him
the dispatch, and after he went to bed,
me and chum of mine thought we
would have 4th Of July. You see
my chum has got sister about as big
as ma and we hooked some of her
clothes and after pa got to snoring we
put them in pas room. 0 you'd a
laffed. We put pair of No. one
slippers with blue stockings, down in
front Of the rocking chair, beside pas
boots, and red corset on chair, and
my chum's SISTERS best black silk dress
on another chair, and hat with white
feather on the bureau, and some
frizzes on the gas bracket, and every
thing we could find that belonged to a
girl in my chums sisters room. o,
we got red parasol, too and left it
right.in the middle Of the room. Well,
when I looked at the lay out, and heard
pa. snoring, / thought | should die.
You see ma knows pa is darn good
feller, but she is easily excited. My
chum slept with me that night, and
when we heard the bell ring
/ stuffed a pillow in my mouth.
There was no body to meet
ma at the depot, and she hired hack
and came right up. No body heard
the bell but me, and had to go down
and let ma in. She was pretty hot, now
you bet, at not being met at the depot.
where is your father2 said she, as
she began to go up stairs.
Il told her / guessed pa had gone
to sleep by this time, butt heard a
good deal of noise in the room about
an hour ago, and may be he was taking
a bath. Then I slipped up stairs and
looked over the banisters. Ma said
something about heavens and earth,
and where is the huzzy, and lot of
things / couldn't hear, and pa said
damfno, and Its no such thing, and the
door slammed and they talked for
two hours. I Is'pose they finally laid
it to me, as they always do cause pa
called me very early this morning,and
when / came down stairs he came out
in the hall and his face was redder'nl
q beet, and he tried TO stab me with
his big toe-nail, and if it hadn't been
for these pieces of brick he would
have hurt my feelings. Isee they had
my chum's sisters clothes all pinned
up in newspaper, and Is'pose when
I go back I shall have to carry them
home, then she will be down on me. |
I'll tell you what I have got a good |
notion to take some shoemaker's wax
and stick my chum on my back and |
travel with circus as double headed |
boy from Borneo. "A fellow could
have more fun, and not get kicked all |
the time. " III
And the boy sampled some straw
berries IN case in front of the store
and went down the street whistIing
For his chum, who was looking out Of an |
.lley to see if the coast was clear.
Peck's Sun.