Connecticut western news., 1882-03-22
WIT AND WISDOM.


 WE love the evil we do until we sui fer for it. ..-...+~
 THE greatest firmness is the greatest mercy.
 Po1ITENEss is a wreath of flowers that adorns the world. "a. ..--t
 THE human soul needs to be mated to develope all its value.
 THE love of some people are but the result of good suppers.
 THERE is more poverty in the human heart than misery in life. Et'
 WHEN 8 fool has made up bis mind. the market has gone by. , ,...I.,'ss ai }, EPrTApH for the honest bankrupt Not lost, but gone behind. "SE~" -'t
 TEE objection to knee brooches is that there is nothing about them to hide the calf in society. ,..5.... ,.-..-..: " osss
 SOME lives are like footprint in the hard rock, enduring forever and some are like footprints in the sand, to be erased by the incoming tide.d 1d VII -'
 "HRAM GREEN" thinks the millennium 'i will never dawn until man knows Eas much about bringing up his own ohll-S'q dren as he does those of his neighbor,,
 AN Illinois boy was choked to death, v by grain of coffee. This ought to be a warning to the man who goes out De. tween the acts to stick to cloves or lemon peel. ,,l..t..E q .s.oY ss fr, g SOMEBODY has figured out that yan- oi derbilts income would allow him to,,jn one day, visit 5000 circuses, eat 10000 pints of peanuts and drink 5000 glassssb,. of lemonade.
 IT is said to greatly improve the tenn. per of a razor to plunge it into hot water before using. A man, however, who IS plunged into hot water at home finds hls temper increased but not inns! ri proved. @ ? ys{ TEACHER" How does the earth ab- sorb water? ?" Pupil" Like 8 dog, Teacher" How do you make that T out2" Pupil" Don't we read of the lap. of the earth ?" Teacher" Go up another grade" g-t 70 -'.H .'. s.A'i A TRAVELLER asked New Haven sa- loon keeper if they ever had any cases of sunstroke in that town.' " No, sir," 4 said he, eff man gets drunk here he ? says he is drunk and never calls it by any other name." ....
 WE learn from the Detroit Free Press that "the grand jury of Bucks County, Pa., have declared the jail un- fit for gentlemen to live in." This must be very annoying to the high.toned swells of that region.
 FRENCH professor (to young miss, angry at inattention): "Another min- ute, mees, and shall go speak to your mamma" Pupil: "Well, take care pa don't catch you at it, that's all. He's awfully jealous" L
 "NEvER leave what you undertake until you can reach your arms around it and clinch your hands on the other side," says 8 recently published book for young men. Most excellent advice;
 but what if she screamsp
 THE most remarkable increase in the valuation of real estate is reported from
 Aurora, Ill. A piece of property there
 has been in litigation seven years, yet
 has risen in value so rapidly that it can
 still be sold for enough to pay all the
 costs.
 THIS is stone Fence. It is built ! Strong. A Man can get over this kind
 of Stone Fence very easy. There are some Stone Fences, however, that are built much Stronger, and it sometimes takes a Man two or three Days to get over one of them. - Yonkers Gazette. WE should have great deal more
 domestic happiness if we would com init to memory the lines which the honest sailor composed for his sweet heart:
 I'll be content with Annie Bread And won't have any but her. "No," SAID the prominent Kansas citizen" no, boys, won't accept the office of County Treasurer. I'm com-
 fortably fixed, like my home, and my neighbors and my family like. don't
 want to have to skip out for Canada and leave all this. Much obliged for the chance, but can't accept" .... Is THERE genius in this country who can outwit the English sparrow The
 little nuisance will dodge bullet, re-
 fuse poisoned food, stand twenty de- grees below zero, and begin rebuilding his nest within two minutes after it has z been toEn down.-Detroit Free Press. "WHEN I grow up, Til -be-~--Aan-- z won't IF" asked a little boy of his l mother. "Yes, my son; but if you
 want to be a man you must be indus a trious at school and learn how to behave F yourself" "Why, mamma, do the lazy ! boys turn out to be women?" "Most n of them do. my child" r. WHAT ails that maid?" said Spilkins,
 As he met passing fair,
 And saw her eyes, heath wave" and 'crimp,"
 Which OCT her forehead dangled limp,
 Give forth a stony stare.
 "Methinks,' said Wilkins, scornfully,
 AS he tossed his head in air, ' "She has no brains to cudgel n And so she bangs her hair" >, IN his lecture on "The Humor of the e Negro Race" Hon. s. s. Cox tells the l. following good one at his own expense: ,- "While in Georgia some time ago hap l. pened to be passing along the street. ,f 'Hullo, Sam,' said particularly black '. colored man. 'Hullo,' promptly re- e piled: whereupon the African aforesaid o retorted 'Cuse me, sah, I'se dressing