Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-12-28
A White Barbarian.

A gentleman from HALEY, Idaho,
came to the Comstock the other day.
Having recently sold his claim he had
plenty of money and went in for style
plug hat and blue silk handkerchief
with one corner sticking tot the pock-
ct of his new diagonal coat. He walked
into the International, and when the
gong rang for dinner he sauntered into
the dining-room with the rest of the
fashionable throng. Everybody looked
at him, but he didn't mind it, and went
on eating, the branded peaches while
waiting for his soup. When that came
he bent SO far over his plate to suck it in
with the sound like the gurgle of a bath
t'1b exhaust-pipe that his plug hat fell off
his heads and rolled across the table
against The plate of an Eastern lady
tourist. With a grin of apology he half
rose, reached over and recovered it, and
placed it on the well-oiled and recently
barbered head. He attacked the trout
with his fingers, and despised the use OF
any other napkin than his mouth.
Pending the arrival of the beef, the gem
tleman from Haley placed both elbows
ON the table and surveyed the company
with great affability and self-possession
as he converted his fork into tooth
pick. Then he lifted his plug hat an inch
or two from his head and scratched the
same gently with his four. pronged tooth
pick. When engaged Ion the beef his
hat fell off again and rolled across to the
Eastern lady, w no had grown pale.
Presently the gentleman from Idaho
had need of a handkerchief, and made
use of the only one which nature, and
probably HALEY, provides. The plug
hat fell on the floor this time, and when
he had recovered and replaced it he sat
alone at the table. He looked with sur
prise at the guests jostling one another
to get out of the door.
"Fire?'' he asked of a transfixed
waiter.
"No," gasped the man.
"No! What's the row, thene'
ssHad enough, / suppose replied
the waiter, with a whitening look.
,'iMighty small eaters, pears to me,
| and cussed queer manners about gitten'
| outen a room. Give us another chunk
| o. beef-pooty fur from the horns, if yer
| KIM r....-...s ....
Presently Landlord Hanak appeared
with colorless face and bullying eyes.
He walked rapidly up and touched the
arrival from HALEY on the shoulder.
"You seem to be having pretty good
| time," said the landlord, refraining
from gnashing his teeth. "a s".t.. a"'
| "Well, that's so, boss. You sit down
here and whack up a bottle O. Wine at
my expense. Oh, I've got a pocketfuf
of rocks, and don't you forget it. Say,
do you happen to know any likely gals
that's on the marry? I'm here on that
lay" and he grinned and once more
1 &c hot a LITTLE and CorQtnhph his
| head with his fork. tt.-iI r' 'i'1 s'' .
The landlord groaned and sat down
| with a thud. Then he gazed determin-
said with set teeth: 81 esEt-28
| 'sssDo you know, my friend, what it
| costs to stop at this house?"'' ,.rS r1-..i
HNo, an don't keer. I've got the
tin. But what's yer figure, jist fur
| luckp" 10 .'..'".i@ ~ Is '''j r.t.i
| ~ r"One-hundred- enthusiastically"
The jaw of the gentleman from Idaho
dropped, and he fell back in his chair and
gazed in fear and wonder at the land
lord, who fixed him with his steady
eye. Then huskily, as he struggled to
an upright position on, his chair, he
| asked: q - ~-s- 4s .aa 81
D ssHow much a meal? This is my
| fust.'' -. .- ... :,
s'Nothing for little lunch like this -
answered Hanak. t-rfe,
With long sigh of returning life the
flush marrying man from HALEY got
his feet and made unsteadily for the
door. He sat the remainder of the day
in the waiting-ro of the depot with
and fled on the evening train. 1Ilrgi4id