davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24

the requirements you suggest said the young lady, because the theme is sad one, and the treatment IS naturally in ac- cord with this fact. can read 1t to you, however"
 Nothing about put away his little rat tie in it, is theref
 "No, sir"
 Nor the beautiful summer is dead, alas /"
 Certainly not"
 Well, then. you may read it,s and the horse reporter settled himselfin critical attitude.
 The young lady produced roll of manuscript. and read as follows .;nd this IS inc cni of ali. fInest. Tie end
 of our happy dreams, walk to the quiet graveyard. where the
 snowy marble gleams Tablets of blightcd hopes. and broken hearts
 that moan For their buried loves and the weary years
 that must be lived alone You go back to the world, Ernest, men $
 hearts so seldom break And under new stars, m new skies s4. soon
 other ties will make: But go back to q desolate iife-no man can
 ever be.
 Though roam the wide world over, wha,
 once you were 10 me. ind this Is the end of all Good-by, Per
 haps f has caused less pain To have gone our separate gsys without see ing each other again. For want of one little word. Ernest. lives
 often drift apart; You spoke that word, but Il came too late
 II only broke my heart.
 "Nice. ain't it. remarked the horse reporter when the reading was finished. Are you the girl that's been up to the graveyard and taken look at the tab lets of biighted hopes sT'
 ..Yes, sir
 Ernest is going back to the world. is he: What has he been doing in St. Louis all this time!''
 ''i hardly think you appreciate the cir eumstanees under which this poem was written::' said the young lady
 ..Oh, yes, do. Ernest is your young man, and you have quarreled with him because he only called you his tootsey- wootsey eighteen times instead of twenty. as you have figured on. You think your heart IS broken. and you wanted to get even by breaking other peoples hearts with your poetry. That's wrong lust now the world seems desolate, and the horizon of your life IS o'ercast with leaden clouds. But time heals all wounds: and Tn about month from now. when some other young man mentions oysters, the chances are you will beat the record get ting your seal-skin jacket of the hat rack.
 You are very much mistaken, sir" said the young lady. My love is no ephemeral passion"
 Do you still want Ernest:r =
 ..fes, sir
 Well. can tell you how 10 get him 7" ''Oh, can you:' asked the girl, enthu- siastically. T shall be so thankful if you will
 You take this poem" said the horse reporter, "and send i, 10 him. Then drop him a line saying the papers have agreed to print it for him. Ii he doesn't. when it comes to having his name mixed up with a lot of grave-yards. blighted hopes, broken hearts and a desolate life I shall miss my guess.
 Do you really think so:' asked the girl.
 "fes: really and truly"
 And will tell you whether or not your plan succeeds she continued.
 Never mind that part of it" replied the compiler of the ,:3o list, The scheme will work all right. Come around again after you are married, and will give you a pointer on no@ to keep Ernest at home nights.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24
Why He Did It.
The Drummer

Inc Drumqefr~
 Well. Sambo," said the judge, ~why did you steal Mir. Browns old hen Didn't you know it was wrong?r
 sYes, sah, knowed it.
 Then why did you do it.'
 Well, yos sec, jedge, as how dar want no young chickens in de coop, and it was de ole hen or no meat for Thanks givin' an jess took her along
 4Ah. was that it? Well, you can have sixty days, and may be there will be some young chickens in the coop by that time. :"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24

A female correspondent of the Phila- delphia 7iss<s suggests that the ladies of that city refuse to kiss cigarette smokers We don't think this move would have any visible effect in discouraging the prac- tice- There are men who never smoked a cigarette in their lives and who some times go hours without any young lady offering to kiss them. If a non-cifaresfe smoking man can only be kissed on sight, we may be happy yet-Cleek.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24
MY OLD WOMAN AND ME.
BY A. N. II.

1 d1re say you Il think Il lonely
 Bat you.see we're. used 10 if here You re api ;o cling 10 place, sir, When you 'vc lived there fifty year, And we two built it together.
 .Iad il look long, long while ltsno small work ,n New Hampshire To scrapc up little pile When things so long in coming You love II better, you sec, And We Worked so hard for home. sir, NJ poor old woman and me. \: ITS, !, was nothing but work, sit, For many a long. long year, And then such pack oi young ones \, kept surprising us here. Whats become of them now, thoagh = >iN of them, sir. all told Why NC buried three of them early. { ider the ehureh-yard mold: Bt; sith three of them living somcwhcre You think II funny, maybe, I | | we're alone m the homestead. Ise poor old woman and me. G5i't quite know how II came, si: queer old W orld iS ,his. in.. the very thing that you am for | the one that yol seem 10 mss. Now. my old woman kept saying, We "sccn too much of toii: Ilsre Mas mote says- ot getting A -li.ihg =---az Iiian roofing II out Of the soil.
  1 lcy would have a chance. you see, 50 s,. serinlped and saved till NC did |. My poor old &oman and me. Nua ought io have seen the learning. I; makes ms poor head ache l Q Ihink hal ich, of training some peoples brain's will ttkr. DId you ever hear o Si. Paul, sir thought perhaps you had And wasn't l, testus told him
 That learning had made him mad If y5d Il seen our oldest boy, though, %1d how eise he got to be, IT h. frightened Il, out of ouE ~its, sir, My poor old woman and ne. H. told IL a lot ot Hsotcncc," Ind h. tied L. argue il round sAt people and bird> and beAsts, sIf. Wa, Ihc -eli li,smc stuff q, the ground. lit talked about thIng> called atom. And a lot et trtsh ike thai. l if 1 couldn't tell tor my life. sir. What ,he boy was getting at. no~ hes lising in Boston,
 iisi 90 far u I ran see II un'l done NcIs usatch better
 Ian III, old woman and me. r next NC had Mas d girl, sir.
 slsh you could see her now =. would have tiic men wash dl,hcS-- While the omen drive the piow. >h talks about female suffrage"
 iad the progress Of the age, i1l l find her name in the paper Whenever 1 read page. Suqposr she should get d husbAnd-
 5Fd what row thcre'd h.: V ios ing palt in Il eozy home.
 like mty old woman and ur. \ :! the other ssungstcr, too. s.r. >.ner ever hc'> been q man, s!--iiif,k-= i,r cuutd rule IlIc county
 tnd there's nohodyscls.' that can. II ,.tys that Il congress only
 Would issac more grccnh.,ckS noA N Il Ill get rich m hurry,
 aui he don't lust tcll Gs how. \o never have had much icHrulns. Sat .sin't a fool you see. \ We think that boy, a humhug, ! hc poor old woman and inc. No young ones is disappointing
 A~ oar experience goes. And line more you do for suose. 2.i. The bigger goose he groW> N like II here on the hillside, IL amt loo lonely for Us The great world goes too fast, We ncs CT could stand the ius>. Sc>idc>. we've three of the young ones 'nder the greenwood tree, And they re the best of the lot. ,Ir. -I. a.s. ...d .4.,E,sa- and -Gia.--------------
 -tb9r teatIneRf
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24
General Butler to the Reporters.
 EExchanre.l

General Butler at the dinner of the Boston Press Cub: Men look to you, not for long leading editorials, for they are of little consequence, but for the keen paragraphs which cover the whole situa- ton in word or phrase"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24

"fes: really and truly
 And l will tell you whether or not your plan succeeds she continued.
 Never mind that part of it." replied the compiler of the ,:5o list. The scheme will work all right. Come around again after you are married, and will give you a pointer on no@ to keep Ernest at home nights
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-12-24
INSTRUMENTAL CONCERT. FORTY FIG HIT ( ATS..'
 Etc. Etc, Etc.

ORTY-ElG HIT CATS..'
 Etc. Etc. Etc.
 The house was crowded at an early hour by the jolly boatmen. the spaces not large enough for men being filled. as usual, by the boys. the omnipresent imps. which are always on hand when there is the usual delay. which elicited from the audience any amount of stamping, whis ting and imitation caterwauling. The curtain rose and the grand catharmoni con was disclosed to view. Two rows of cats heads, two dozen each, glared with iustrous green and yellow eyes straight at the audience. Little ruffies were around their necks miniature music stands. with books and candles. were placed before them the aforesaid two bassos, whose beauty was spoiled by the fight. being provided with muslin bands, which added to the gravity of their countenances. The whole was indescribably comic and was received with due applause. Seated at the organ was Johnson, in a clean shirt. and as sober as he could afford to he on so grand an occasion.
 As soon as he could be heard, Curtis advanced and stated to the audience that the first song of the evening would be Auld Lang Syne,' or, as he pronounced it, "Oid Lang Zion." which would be fol- lowed by Hail Columbia" Clar de Kitchen" and other patriotic and devo- tional songs. Johnson squared himself for the task. ran his fingers tendcrly over the keys by way of prelude, and then dashed boldly into "Old Lang Zion,' producing such burst of music as was never heard on this continent before, nor never will be again till another Curtis arises to cany into more successful exc cution his brilliant experiment. The cats were excited to fury in the presence of the new and uproarous audience, and still more under the unusually severe pounding of their tals. They forgot all the lesson. they had been taught, they paid no attention to their parts, to either time: or tube, rhyme or reason, but squslled and mewed, yelled, spit and phixzed in the very madness of pain and tenor. drowning the sound of the organ, which could be heard occasionally dron- ing out its stOld Lang Zion," in the rear of the unearthly tornado of caterwauling. Never was an audience % completely enchanted was delight 90 unusual, so unbounded and 90 vigorously ex- pressed Shouts, roars, yells ef laughter, such as western men alone can give, buryt from the crowd, shaking the building from roof to foundation. Curtis vas de-
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14
Mummies as Bris-a-brac,

1t is estimated that the number of
bodies embalmed from B. c. 1000,
when naturalization is supposed to
have been first Dracticed, to A. d. 700.
when it ceased, amounts to 426, 900, 900.
Some Psychologists, who extend the
beginning of the art to much earlier
date, estimate the number of mummies
at 731 10000 A writer in Harper's
Magazine shows how productive these
mummies are to the modern Egypt
ians:
The modern traveller is not content
to collect merely beads and funeral
statuettes and such small game. He
must bring home an ancient Egyptian.
The amount OF business done of late
years in this grim kind Of brio brac
has bee n very considerable.
Mummies, however, are expensive
hobbies, only to be INDUCED ii by the
wealthy. From $50 to sl0O was at that
time the average price of FIJI sized
specimen, while from G10 TO G12 was
asked for baby.
The purchaser of the Pinotem papy-
rus paid e400 for his bargain, and it
may be assumed that royal mummy
FROM the same source would have cost
at least double that sum.
That Rameses III. was, a. lately as
1880, actually offered for sale to q
wealthy Ame rican who did not, how.
ever, believe in the genuineness OF the
article as reported, and declined to
deaI), is a fact for which I have the
authority of one of that travellers com
panions.
But the ordinary mummy sold to
the ordinary tours is of quite anoth er
class. He belonged in his day to the
lesser nobility that is to say, he was
an architect q sacred scribe, a civil or
military official.
Such n ummies, ranging chiefly
from the twenty.first to wenty sixth
dynasties, form the staple OF Theban
trade.
AS for the Theban fellsh, mummy
hunting is his hereditary vocation. He
passes his life in digging, finding, hid
ing and selling; his home is al empty
sepulcher; his shirt is made CT mum
my cloth his children's pla. things
and his wife's ornaments are spoils of
the dead.
His forefsthers have subsisted for
generations by this equivocal indus
try, and his descendants will sDbsist
by it for who shall say how many gen.
erations to come?
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14
The Fossil Carson Footprints.

At late meeting of the California
Academy of Science, Professor Joseph
LIE Conte spoke on the recent diseOv-
cry of human footprints at Carson,
Nevada, particulars of which have
already been given in the Tribune
After careful examination of the
locality the Professor came to the con-
clusion that if the footprints were not
in Quarternary formation, they were
not likely to be older than the upper
Pliocene passing into Quarternary.
No one, he said, who studied the tracks
could fail to observe their remarkable
general resemblance to human foot
prints, both in their form and in the
apparent aingleness of each impress
sion. Their size called for explana-
ton, although well defined as rights
and lefts, their straddle was unusually
wide. He thought they might have
been made by human foot inclosed
in a raw-hide sandal much larger ex-
ternally than the foot. This would at
first make fiat track until soaked
through, after which it would leave a
round impression but no toe marks.
The bear and Mylodon or gigantic
ground sloth could alone make track
at all resembling the footprints in size
and form, and they were not the
tracks of either of these, they were
those of biped, more likely man or
the antropoid ape, Familiarity known
as the missing link in the chain of
human evolution. The track was too
much curved for any bear. He knew
of no animal but biped that could
make such tracks and this was posi-
BILE for man with san dals on 10 do.
AS judicial mind, he desired to hold
his final scientifically expressed opin-
ion in reserve, awaiting further testi-
mony.
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14
A Poor Town for Business.

He was red nosed, wild eyed man
from the head waters of Sage Run.
and looked as if he hadn't been in
town since oil was discovered. His
rusty pants were several inches too
short at one end, and he carried half
dozen coon skins in his right hand
AT the postoffice corner he met a
lady. and stopping her by holding the
bunch of hides before her face, said
Cant l sell you som ething for to
make set of furs ?''
The lady screamed and shot over to
the other side of the street.
"Does any of your neighbors want
to buy anything of the kind ?" he
yelled. E+t Il.t
The lady sc canned again.
Now, what's the matter with Han.
ner?" remarked the red-nosed man :
the lady disappeared in the door oppo-
site.
A moment later the man veered
into bank and threw the hides down
at the cashiers window.
WV oOAhC n w. COOu BALLS mere
that I'll sell cheap. Not a scratch of
a tooth on any of them. Ketched
every one of 'em in box trap"
I'VE have no use for Them" said
the President politely, and az he
cast an oblique glance at the goods.
They will make you nice vest.'
said the red-nosed man. 1.-TWO hides
will make you vest and one'n make
you a cap thatll wear you as long as
you live"
MY dear sir" replied the Presi
dent, somewhat con fused, 1--WE don't
want hides here. Take them some
where else, please"
"Mebbe your wife would like set
of furs, and these is"
mo, no, no, replied the banker, i'm.
patiently, take the things away !;
they are offensive.n
Whats that ?" said the red-nosed
man, sharply.
Take the blamed things out OF
this" exclaimed the eXasparated
banker; they smell like slaughter
house,
'Ill take dollar for the lot"
''The people next door buy coon
SKINS" put in the cashier take
them in there, take them up town,
take them down town, take them over
the river, take"
Gimme fifty cents for the lot" lie
persisted.
eff you don't get out OF this III
kick your head off," yelled the Presi.
dent.
"I'll take thirty-two cents for six "
said the red.nosed man. "D'ye SAY
the word ?'' and he dangled the bun co
by the tails.
The President started for the out
side. The man with the skins started
for the sidewalk, and after having
reached it he paused and said:
"drea-a-at Godfrey If sealskin and
sable were selling for a cent car load,
the hull town can't buy the sand.ps-
pered end of rats tail.u
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14

ting on box In front of h store, and
as he caught sight of them grin crept
over his face like molasses spreading
out on shingle.
"Grinning atus, suppose7e que.
ried the young man, as he came 3
halt.
YES" frankly replied the sitter.
'Tiekles you most to death to see Us
take hold of hands, don't it ?"
ut does"
"And you imagine you can see US
feeding each other earamels can't
YOUR
81 CAM
"And you shake all over at the way
we gwap around and keep our mouths
open pr
That's me.n
swell, this is me Pm not purity,
and haven't been cultivated between
the rows nor billed up nor fortified
| amt what you call stabilized, and the
old man looks twenty per cent. worse
than I do, but 1t won't take over a
minute to jam you seven feet into the
ground ] told Lucy L was going to
begin on the first man who looked
cross-eyed at US, and you are the chap.
Prepare to be pulverized !"
beg pardon, but l didn't mean-r'
Eyes, you did Lucy, hold my hat
while mop him!"
"Say-hold on-say-"
He took up the middle of the street
like runaway horse, and the young
man took after HIM, but is was no use.
After race of block the man who
grinned gained SO fast that the other
stopped short and went back to his
girl and his hat. Stretching forth his
hand to the innocent maiden, he
remarked:
Lucy, clasp on to that, and if you
let go for the next two hours, even to
wipe your nose, I'll never call you by
the sacred name of wife p'
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14

joint commission agreed upon the
boundary report which has now been
ratified by treaty. The report sus-
tains the title of Mexico to the disputed
territory, and as there has never been
one valid argument urged against the
justice of Mexico's claim during the
sixty years in which the dispute has
been pending it is fortunate that the
United States Government avoided an
Intervention which would have been
totally warranted.
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14
The Guatemalan Boundary
Settled.

The boundary dispute between
the two Republics of Mexico and
Guatemala has been finally set
tied by the signing of treaty con.
irmipg Mexican rights, in conformity
to the terms of the report OF the joint
boundary comm ission which was Gre
ated five years ago. The territory in
dispute was the province OF Socnnusco,
in the State OF Chiaras, and there
seems to have been lao re- al gIoun d for
the claims CT Guatemala, which were
so adroitly put forward last year by
Senior Montufar and Minister Logan
tor no other apparent purpose than to
induce the United States to sieze the
disputed territory as foothold for
schemes of general annexation in the
future.
There has never been any q uestion as
20 the Incorporation OF Chispas with
the Mexican republic When the 18TH
milan States declared their independ-
ence of Spain in 1921 Chiapas joined
the movement of General Iturbide
and formally declared her separation
from Guatemala. In 1922 Guatemala
anited with Mexico, bat the union
was dissolved the next year, and In
May, 1924, Chiapas, by a vote of her
junta, again declared her adhere nee to
Mexico. and the decision was con-
firmed by vote Of the people liz Sep
TENDER, Soconusco in both instances
approving by the votes of her repre-
sentatives and her people. Guatemala
twice attempted to occupy the coveted
territory by force, claiming Soconusco
as a ate independent Of Chiapes,
and in l842 unsuccessfully appealed to
England to interfere IN her interest.
Soconusco is of no particular import
snce, having population of only f1f.
teen thousand, but Guatemala per.
sisted in her claims until 1877, when
commission of engineers from the two
rival governments was created by
treaty to fix the boundary. When 1t
became apparent that the rights of
Mexico would be sus stained, Senior
Montufat, at that time Minister OF
Foreign Affairs and afterward Guate-
mslan Minister at Washington
threatened war with Mexico and at
tempted, through DR.. Logan, to in
duce Secretary Blaine to commit the
United States to a policy of interfer-
enoe, just as the attempt had been
made, forty years before, to induce
England to interfere.
1t was even suggested that Guate-
mala would cede her interest in the
disputed territory to the United States,
provided our government would con.
sent to occupy 1t. Secretary Blaine at
first favored friendly Intervention,
but the suggestion of occupation By
our overnment and the certainty that
such move would provoke war with
Mexico disclosed the reckless nature
of the Guatemalan intrigue and the
negotiations were dropped. Within
five months of the failure of Senior
Montufsr's scheme In Washington the
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14
FARMER's pCE.

Gentle and harmless when trarnps 49,.
the gate, ~e
Ways bis tail and leaves You 70 vo,.. -
he Is very costly beast to keep. '''s
Repays your kindness by kilfoo
Haiftne cost of keeping dog
Might raise a NICE P1iand China hog
Or feed aud clothe some nom .ess IS.
VINO in the world knows 40 plaza 49,
To rest bis bones, or lay MS neal
Choosing hedge-row for his ba5
Whilst the ours that infest the LAM
Are nursed and petted from hama.
1t costs the farmer to keep such pets -a'd
Enough TO pay the nations osb.s
The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-10-14
Scraps.

Every man is fond of striking the
nail on the head but when it happens
to be the finger nail, his enthusiasm
becomes wild and incoherent.
Don't say mean thing about any
man, and 1t may possibly happen
that some time one may be able
truthfuily to say kind thing about
you.
An old Japanese author says: "All
the soldiers of great arDly can be
captured; but the thoughts of the
most vulgar person cannot be arrest.
ed"
A man is said to be absentminded
when he thinks he has left his watch
at home and takes it out of his pocket
to see If he has time to return home to
get it.
well, my little man, aren't you
barefooted rather early this season 2"
said benevolent gentleman to q
youngster, this morning. "Guess
not. Wuz born barefooted."
In the mountains (whose
soul is wrapped in science. Charles,
isn't this gneisa ~ Charles (who is
deeply interested in Arabella) Mice!
It's delicious"
"My advice to de Hoosier brudder
am not to lie or to deceive in tradein
mules; but to answer as few queshuns
rs you kin, an seem sort o. keerless
whedder his offer am 'cepted or not"
A new railway was opened in the
Highlands. A Highlander named
Donald heard of it and bought a ticket
for the first excursion. The train
was short distance fcom the station
when a collision took place, and
| poor Donald was thrown unceremon.
eously into park. After recovering
his senses he made the best of his
way home, whenthe neighbors aske
him how he liked his ride. Goa
said Donald, ~ liked it fine, but they
had an awful quick way in putin me
out"
HIS DUTIES AS A HosT.-A good
story is told of a couple of farmers
who lived few miles apart. The per-
son called upon was penurious old
fellow. He was seated at the table.
The visitor drew up to the stove, look
ing wistfully toward the table, ex-
pecting the old farmer to ask him to
dine.
whats the news over your way,
neighbor? (still eating). No news
over there, Ell ~
mo, / believe not"
Presently a thought seemed to
strike the visitor.
"Well, yes, friend, heard one item
worth mentioning"
"Ahi what is that ?"
"Neighbor John has COW that has
five calves"
SIS that so? Good gracious! what
In thunder does the fifth calf do when
the others are sucking ?"
Islands and looks on. just as 1 do,
like fool"
MARY, put on another plate"