The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1882-04-11
Give the Barber His Due.

ligned artist. lie is set 10th as heinz
a skillful business man and a hum
orist, II he were half as shrewd al
he is sail to be, he wonld ccrtsinly
have sense enough to go into Wal
street and become the possessor of ,
few railroads. And If he were tn,
merry jester that he is claimed to be
he would get into circuu or minstre
troup and secure wealth and recogni
tion by the introduction of fresl
Joke which would not only rebound t
his credit, but be step towards an
nlhilation Of those which are so oil
that they are oblige to hobble oil
crutches and hold themselves tagethe
with trusses.
In truth, the BARRIERS use only tn,
most commonplace, every day Ian
yusge. To prove this it is only nee
essary to give conversation l over
heard tho other morning between OH,
oil these so called tiends and cJuto'
mer, the barber opening:
Fine day!
Yes.
Guess the rains over.
Yes.
Wen have. snow before long,
think?
Correct. In some parts Of the
world they have snow even at tlii,
time, in other parts they never have
snow. while there are regions where
snow lies on the ground all the yeal
round; Y.u are right in your pre-.
dictidn, however, and you would be
safe III betting on 1t without consult
ing the almanac
Are you in the weather bureau?
No; sell pork.
Pause.
Does the razor hurt.
Not at all. | can't feel it ally more
than You can feel candidates pc
cuniary pulse the morning alter elec
iion day..
The election excitement is over; is
it?
1t is-it has been over about two
weeks. !.
Pause. tH ~
Is it too cold for you with the door
oren9
Not at all.
We are going to have mild win
ter.
1t looks that way. and I trust we
mar be able to scramble through on
our bamboo canes and summer under
clothes, aga
Pause.
Cluse shave?
Yes. as close as yon can; | want thi,
shave TO last until payday.
Crops are COED here?
They may be; but it is not proper
for man who cuts hair to speak Of
crops. That was originally intended
for a joke in London, where it was
bnilt, anl had long, prosperous run,
and underwent various changes to
meet various contingencies. 1t is nov
respected SIMPLY on account of it,
great age, andis kept alive on warm
bricks, slimulants and meGicated un
derclothes.
Pause.
A sail suicidel last night?
Didn't hear Of it, but it must have
been. Suicides are generally sad
Don't know as Lever heard Of rea
delightful, merry suicide that embrac
ed all the estate elements of a sal
over tranquil lake at awilight. ac
companioi by a girl with soft, BLACK
eyes and tender little rosebur
mouth.
Pause.
Your hair is getting thin on top.
That's the correct place for it t
| get thin. suppose man HAIR shoult
fall out all around and remain intac
on the top! Then he would be tufte,
like a cockatoo anil he would eclipse
a minstrel show every time ho liite'
his hat to a lady. And he might
wax such tuft aud work it up to
point like goatee, and thus affor'
his friends lots OF innocent amuse
ment, orhe might grow it long, AM
let it hang, around his heal in
firing, or convert it into a piytail.
Pause.
Bay rum?
1 Yes.
Fifteen cents.
Hero.
Good morning.
| And the patron who had done twic
as much talking as the barber walke
out. Puck.