The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1882-11-10
Playing It on q soldier.

George W. Peck.
Many persons think that these old soldiers
who meet at reunions have become dignifed
and forgotten how to have any fun when they
get together. That is the greatest mistake that
was ever made. We suppose there was more
fun to the square mile during the reunion
here than was ever enjoyed before since the
world began Among the Chicago boys, as 9
guest, was Theo. R. Davis, the artist of Har-
per's Weekly, who was all through the war,
and whose pencil has caused many battle
field to be impressed upon the minds of hun
dreds Of thousands of people who were not
there. There was one of the Chicago men
who sometimes took in q little too much
wet stuff, and who was a little excitable
when full, though royal good fellow. The
visiting, the music, the marching, the cheer
ing and the excitement of the reunion, with
little dust of liquor, had made him feel quite
excited, and he wanted to fight his battles over
again, but the boys kept him quiet, and fin
ally got him to bed, and soon he slept like
log The boys were in the room telling stor-
les. when some one called attention to the
sleeping comrade, and in second an idea oc-
CURED to Davis, the artist He said he would
go to his room and get his water
paint and brushes, and some court plaster,
and paint the face Of the sleeping comrade SO
he would look as though he had been in
fight, and been knocked all to pieces. The
boys said it would be good idea, and pretty
soon the artist was at work with his soft cam
els hair brushes, and the boys stood over the
artist and his human canvas. holding
their sides to keep from roaring. The artist
first painted two black eyes that you would
swear had been made by a mans fist Then
he painted swelling on one cheek, and on the
forehead he painted what looked as though a
sledge hammer had mashed in the skull and
left the brain oozing out Then the artist
took some strips Of court plaster and stuck
one across the painted broken nose, another
across the mouth, sealing both lips; and the
boys stood back to look at the stricken man
and wait for the court plaster to dry. The
scene was so real that one of the boys actually
turned pale while looking at the sleeper. The
boys held consultation and agreed that when
their friend awoke they should look heart
broken, and make him believe he had been
mauled out of all human shape; and they
got strange veteran from Oshkosh to per-
senate DOCTOR After little the sleeper be-
gan to wake up, and one of his friends took
seat by his bedside, took hold of his pulse,
and as he opened his eyes the friend said:
snow, don't exert yourself, and don't try to
talk The doctor says you will be all right If
you remain quiet"
The victim of the joke opened his eyes and
was going to ask what in Gehenna was the
matter, and what made them stand around
like lot of pall-bearers, when he found his
mouth held together by court plaster, and his
voice sounded like man with hair-lip ask
ing somebody to go to the devil At this point
Lu Drury, one of the jokers, was having
trouble to keep from laughing so he put
handkerchief to his face, sobbed, and said,
@My God, boys, this is horrible" The victim
looked at Lu, and would have sworn his great
heart was Overcharged with grief, and he tried
to talk, but the court plaster would not permit
him. At this point the Oshkosh villain, who
acted as army surgeon, went to the bedside of
the wounded man, relieved the other watcher,
felt of his pulse and said:
@Don't be discouraged, my boy, we will
pull you through, if you do not get excited
have cured worst cases.
Then he took pair of scissors and cut the
court-plaster that held the lips together, and
said:
"There, how do you feel now? Don't talk
much, but don't you feel relieved?"
The victim looked at the doctor and at the
boys who were picturesquely standing around
the bed, and said:
@Doc for Gods sake, what has happened to
me?"
The doctor told him to be quiet, and then
whispered to him:
@You have had the worst fight that man
ever had and lived. man attacked you on
Wells street with view of robbing you, and
you defended yourself, but it was a hard
struggle Mr.. Drury, please hand me that
hands glass; There, you can see for yourself.
There is a confusion of the brain, the eyes are
discolored, and thought your jaw was brok-
en-, but as you can talk guess it is only frac-
tured. But you ought to see the man that
Jumped on you. There, now, don't look at
yourself too much. You will look better to-
morrow"
. The victim took long look at himself, and
the first thing he said was:
"Is the other fellow alive?"
1t was all the boys could do to keep from
bursting, but they kept sober faces, and the
doctor said the other fellow was alive, but he
was the worst used up man he ever sewed up.
He said one arm was broken and one eye
gouged out, and his face looked as if pile
driver had struck him. The victim smiled a
satisfied smile as he heard how he had whipped
the other fellow Then the boys asked him if
he had any message to send home. He took
the mirror and looked at himself again. and
said: telegraph for my wife" That was too
much and the boys roared and the doctor
tore off the court plaster from his
nose, another fellow brought wet towel and
the paint was washed off, and when he was
clean the boys handed him the mirror, and he
looked at himself again, and then saw it was
joke, and he wanted to kill some of them, but
just then a colored boy brought up couple
of bottles of wine, and the injured man got
up, and the war was over. But for couple
of days, if any body said, as the other fellow
alive?" or Telegraph my wife" in his pres
pocket The artist Mr.. Davis, the one most to
blame, had to look out for himself the rest of
time during the reunion, or he would have
been challenged