The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1882-03-10
T0DSBURY'S COW.
What She Cost Her Master.
n. o. Times Democrat.

n. o. Times Democrat.
"Nathaniel,n said Mrs. TOdsbury
to her husband, IL think the family
would be great deal healthier if we
had a COW TO furnish pure milk
The nasty, chalky mixture we get
from the mllknan is simply abom,
Unable. Mrs. Goldman has lust
purchased IN excellent COW, aud
Mrs. Bowman told me that she was
going to get one, and Nathaniel
"My DEAR interrupted her has,
band, ~ COW is too expensive and
too troublesome to keep; beside, in
the SIMMER time the neighbors are
always comulaiuing about the flies
to the police.'
Mrs. Todsbury beat the carpet
with her foot angrily, burst into Q
flood OF tears and declared that nc
matter how slight was her wish il
was never gratitied. The result
was that Todsbury picked up his
hat, dashed out of the house, and
visiting the newspaper Offices ad
vertised for u good, gentle milch
COW.
The next morning a red.headed
man, with nose looking like a cor
rugated tomato, and leading q
brindle-colored muley COW By a
rope. appeared at the Todsbury
domicile. The man SAID the COW
furnished "a water.bucket full OF
milk twice a day, and was worth
not u cent less than $50. Todsbury,
after considerable objections, fin,
ally paid the man the money and
the COW was duly installed in the
woodshed, and food provided fol-
her. The next morning Todsbury
visited the wOodshed for the pur
pose of viewing his new purchase,
and. failing to notice thai the gate
of the yard leading to the street
was open, turned the COW out Of
the woodshed, intending to allow
her to exercise her limbs. She did
40. The first exercise she indulged
in was to pound Mr.. Todsbury il
the stomach, split his coat aud
pants in the back, aud hur
him backward into a wood.pile, af
ter which she dashed through the
open CUTE into the street, where sh,
conceived that she was n revolving
battering.ram, and that the entire
world was her enemy. AS soon ~
tho crazy idea entered her head
she hoisted her tail as a bottle tiy
galloped down the street with al
eye to business. Seeing quite 4
crowd eongregated on the side
walk she concluded it was time fol
the battle to commence and opened
on the enemy. AT the first fire AZ
aristocratic old bondhoIder, with /
white beaver hat aud a large stom
ach, was struck in the watch pocke
and fell with u crushing thud upon
u coil of barbed wire standing IN
front of a store near by. The COW
realizing the advantage she had
attained b. the sudden onslaught,
and believing victory was now
within her grasp, doubled-shotted
her bow batter and beloved with
JOY. The next time she pulled tht
trigger a boy with sore toe and
u man with u long ladder on his
shoulder went down In u heap.
The din of battle, the howls oi
the wounded, mingling with the
victorious war whoops of the COW,
made the street unusually lively al
that time OF the day. The COW, see
ing that she had successfully turn
ed the left-wing, blazed away at
the righ. Two commercial drum
lners, a hoop-skirt, an old-school
Presbyterian and set OF false
teeth covered the sidewalk like a
porous plaster aud plainly indiea'
ted that the shot had raked the
frightened enemy fore and aft.
Brave men who marched into
the flame OF belching cannon with.
out u tremor of fear skinned their
legs getting up on high fences,
where the view was better, and
yelled to the crowd to knock the
dickens out of the darn COW with
clubs and stone-coal. The crowd,
however, having the same desire to
obtain q good view, cooned their
way up trees aud shed-posts ana
informed the brave men that they
could step to-Arkansas. In a few
moments the street was cleared and
the COW continued her charge III
search OF new conquests, and was
finally landed In the pound. Tods-
bury, for some time after, was Kept
quite busy trying to compromise
the damage suits which persons
brought against him who had sui
fered from the pugnacions propen-
stiles of his COW. After a great
deal of trouble he sold the cowpfor
$3.50, and managed to settle the
damage suits by paying out nearly
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