davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
Catching A Crab.

San Francisco Correspondence.
They tell a story OF a would-be funny broker,
who last season adopted most flendish
method OF getting even with ono OF the
chronic flirts who are said to mako tho piazzas
here lively later In the season. He obtained
half dozen energetic crabs from tho fishing
beach, and, watching for an opportunity when
no one was in particular tank except tho in.
consistent fair object OF his vengeance, he
dropped in the crustaceans way up term for
crabs). The young Lady continued her nata
torial exercises dam up for paddling) few
minutes longer, when she suddenly uttered
blood'curdling shrek, and was helped up tho
ladder with crab hanging on her pink little
toe. She had several consecutive epileptic fits
while the marine corn doctor was being re-
moved. Tho Mephistophelean glee OF the
broker, however, gave him away, and for fear
OF some counter trick he decided to bathe
early in tho morning thereafter. A few days
after that the bathhouso keeper was startled
by some terrific yells, and, hastily entering
tho tankhouse, no behold the broker founder
ing out with big, jagged-toothed spring rat
trap clenched on his heel.
"who tho devil put this horrible thing in tho
water?' roared the broker.
81 did, sir" sweetly replied tho Grabbed
young lady aforementioned, stepping out OF a
bathroom. III put 1t there TO catch those nor
rid crabs, you know"
The broker went homo on crutch.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
THE U. s. s. pALE,s COLLISION.
Official Report OF Commander Har.
ringtOn-He ExOncrates All His

Omcial Report OF Commander Har.
ringtOn-He ExOncrates All His
Officers.
Tho Secretary OF tho Navy has received tho
following report OF the collision between tho
US. s. Dale and the American ship Cornelius
Grinnell at the entrance Of East River, N. Y:
"The Dale was passing the entrance Of the
East River, under topgallant sails, to wind
ward Of the Grinnell, which was at anchor,
when the wind shifted suddenly to the south
ward. The ship failed to stay in the strong
ebb out OF the East River, and driftod down
across the bows OF the Grinnel1, VIII ich was
close aboard. The flying tibboom Of the Grin
nell was carried away. have sent board OF
officers TO ascertain her exact damages, and
herewith forward n copy OF the report"
The report then recites that the damages to
the Dale are not extensive, and that four tugs
had to be employed to pull the Grinnell clear,
for which service 500 were paid. 1t Will be
unnecessary for tho Dale to return to the
navy.yard for repair, and she will DO ready to
proceed to sea at once. The report concludes
IAN accident OF this character usually in.
wolves blame and loss OF professional reputa-
tion 10 tho officers concerned. I beg, there
FORE to say that was in charge OF the ship,
giving all orders, and relieve all other ofli-
GERS and persons OF any charge OF response
bility. i trust, however, that the Department
Will regard this occurrence as accidental, aud
not to be prevented by ordinary foresights,
and that my management OF the ship will
not be considered inexcusable." Tho report
is signed by Commander p. F. Harrington.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
The senate Yesterday.

Tho Senate had under consideration whom
our report closed yesterday tho Sundry Civil
Appropriation bill.
Tho California Senators objected to the com.
mittee amendment In regard to tho material
to be used in the construction of the dry.dock
at Mare Island Navy-Yard, and pursuant TO
their suggestions the clause was amended so
as to dispenso with the supervision OF the Score
tary OF the Navy over the subject and to direct
the use OF granite for the entire work. The
increase reported by the committee OF $50, 900,
making the appropriation for the work $780,
900, was adopted without objection.
The House Joint resolution, authorizing the
Secretary Of War to deliver to the One Hun
dred and Eighth Ohio Volunteer Infantry
Association the blue regimental flag which
belonged TO tho regiment and now in tho
custody OF the Secretary of War, was, on
motion OF Mr.. Pendleton, passed.
The consideration Of the sundry Civil bill
was resumed.
The committee reported In favor OF striking
out the proviso Which discontinuos the deposit
system In land surveys.
The committee amendment was rejected and
tho proviso retained.
The Senate, after the disposition OF seventy
six pages OF tho bill, made an agreement to
finish 1t to-day under the nve-minute rule
for debate,
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
The Labor Troubles.

The annual convention of the National
Brotherhood OF Carpenters and Joinors began
in Philadelphia yesterday.
The hands at Charles Keighley's extern
siye shoe factory at Vineland, N. j., struck
yesterday. They demand the reinstatement
Of two female operatives who have been dis.
charged for becoming members OF the Knights
OF Labor.
The convention of Amalgamated Iron
workers was welcomed at Chicago yesterday
by Mayor Harrison. President Jarrett madea
brief speech, and Mr.. A. NJ. Carpenter, of
Springfield, ILL.,, urged the necessity OF organi-
cation, and pointed out the benefits to DO de-
rived from tho workingmen taking IN active
interest and part In politics. Tho association
then went into secret session.
William s. Jacques, president. and +. J.
Sterling, vice.president OF tho New Central
Coal Company, visited Homecoming yesterday
to look Into matters at Koontz mine. Twenty
carpenters are at whrk on the new building,
and four moro police went down, making tho
number on the ground fifteen. The visiting
party afterward went 10 Camp Mayer and re-
turned TO Cumberland In the evening. Blk
new men from Cumberland arrived at Camp at
Frostburg yesterday, and forty old miners,
Americanized foreigners, are expected in q few
days from Pennsylvania. The output at Eek
hart yesterday was 576 tons, and at Hoffman
260. The Georges Creek Coal Company yester-
day issued notices to quit TO six OF the miners
cupying the company's houses.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
Minnehaha Lodge orGood TempIars.

Minnehaha Lodge OF Good Tomplars hold It's
regular weekly meeting last evening at its
splendid lodgeroom corner Seventh and d
streets. The attendance, which included sew
eral visitors, was very large, in spite of tho
Indictment weather. which is an evidence that
the meetings OF this popular ana active or
ganization arc appreciated. Mr.. A. IL, Frear,
the q. w. chief tomplar OF tho District, as
sisted by W. nj, 2. Caldwell as @. w. secretary,
and Mr.. Copeland as q. w. marshal, Installed
the following officers for tho present official
term MIR. A. kalstrom, W. chief templar Mrs
A. Plat, W. yicetemplari Mr.. q. W. Ward, w.
ilcancial secretary; Mrs. j. II. Lowis, w.
treasurer; Mrs. l.. NJ. Blaine, W. chaplain; Mr..
j. II. Dony, W. marshall Miss Sadie Jennings,
W, l. guard Mr.. James Bedo, W. o. sentinel;
Mrs. NJ. A. Darnall, II. II. Supporter; Mrs. Not.
tic Sanford, l.. III. supporters Miss Kate Oar
nall, assistant recording secretary; Miss
Laura Baker, deputy marshal, and W. II.
Young p. W. chief templar.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02

THERE are ninety.one names on last
weeks death record.
EIGHrY.Two births eight still. births and
nineteen marriages took place In the District
during the past week.
Mr.. M. b. ARMIES received permit TO.
day to improve and remodel houses No. 900
and 900 X street northwest.
THE remuneration of Francis Profit as
executor under the will Of wilhemina Eichler
was iiled with the Register to-day.
w. G. DODGE, ESQ.,, will invest $4,000 in
the erection OF a brick dwelling on D street be-
tween First and Second street northwest.
CHIEF CRoNIN's record shows that the
department responded TO fourteen iiro alarms
during the month OF July. The total damage
was 4,15O, on which there was an insurance OF
spontaneous combustion, one by q fire.cracker,
one by explosion OF an oven, two were incen.
diary, one caused by lamp explosion, and one
CHIEF CRoNIN states that this morn
ing's IRE was the work OF IN incendiary. The
stock destroyed could not have boon worth
over 800, but was permeated with kerosene
and insured for $780,. Tho damage to stock
and the destruction Of tho shanty Will not
cause a loss OF more than 5000.
He drove up the avenue this morning in
dilapidated wagon painted ''yaller' and
drawn by diminutivo mule. on each side
OF the vehicle, In bold bright letters were the
following words; "Doyd's Boss Cure" The
appearance OF this wagon with It's strange de-
vice bodies no good for Cameron and others.
II attracted much attention, especially from
Tom Bayne and other Pennsylvania lndepen.
dents. Charley Murray seoing II rushed to his
ofiice and sent a dispatch to Alex. Mcclure.
THE nurse-girl and tho cook made things
lively IN General Wrlghts kitchen yesterday
and had 70 BIO pulled apart to prevent blood.
shed: Tho cases were ventilated in tho Police
Court to-day.
Mrs. II. w. RowELL, of this city, will
tomorrow start TO the White Mountain
regions, where she Will remain q couple OF
months.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02


We had 10 wait for half an hour between
Charleston and Savannah for the waycross
train, and during this time black man camo
up to me and inquired;
SAY, boss, doan' YOU lib ub Norff'
WYeS,"
"Dats what reckonod on. Kin ak few
queshunsT"
"You can"
"wall, sab, does cherry Guild man up dar
own n brick house Wild a cupuio on topS"
specs he walk aroun' with bag of gold
in ono han an bag OF silver in do odder?"
81 never saw any OF them taking such
walk.
."po dcy all own HOSES an kerrIdscs ?"
"Do dey all have diamonds an pearls an
welyets p
"say, boss, my names Jones, an lib ober
beyand dat pine woods. My ole woman am oil
de time stirrin mo up TO go Norf, an she really
believes dat II we once git up dar we kin go
out befo' breakfast an pick upa pallfull o.
diamonds. Now, sab, tell mo do solemn truf
bout II Could We do 1t ~
"could we pick up peck ,"
~" no guarts'"
1.-TWO quarts'"
"Dats nun, boss-dat settles mel l reckon
II aNed bout one quart you'd say yes, but II
anybody 'spects Ize gwine 10 fool aroun' wild
any sich small taters as dat day am sadly
token In. L re kept house long nun 10 know dat
quart % diamonds n day wouldn't keep a
'Bleeged TO ye, boss. Mebbe I'll git up dat
way arter while, but shan't spect 70 own
no brick house Wild cupulo on top TIL I've
bin dar hull week or longer. "-LeWiS.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
The Death warrant Returned.

The death warrant in the case OF Charles J..
Guiteau, was returned to tho clerks ofiice to-
day with the following Endorsement.
~, John s. Crocker, warden OF the Jail Of the
District OF Columbia, do hereby certify that by
virtue OF the within writ did proceed to
carry into execution the sentence OF the Court
MS within directed, and did cause the within
named Charles J. Guiteau 70 be hanged by
the neck until he was dead, between the
hours OF IL m. and p. M, OF the said Both
day OF June, A. d. 1882, within the walls Of
the Jail OF the said District Of Columbia, as
therein commanded.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
T liver COMPLAINT.

Cor. 9th 4 II SITS. N. W., Dec. 81, 10
Gentlemen:
My husband has suffered
with Liver Complaint and Dys-
pepsia from his youth. After
taking two bottles OF Browns
Iron Bittors, feels that he can
recommend them for their ben
ellcial results.
MRS. A. M. KNIGHT.
browns Iron Bitters cures
Liver Complaints, Kidney Dis.
cases, enrlcheg the blood and
revitalizes the whole syetem.l
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
Real Estate Transfers.

Tor s., sublots 1o1, 105, log, 107 and 10,
square 212; Mills Dean ct al, trustees, TO u.
Tobrlner, for S2,755, part Of lot n, square
100; Marian O. Fltzhugh to z. Tobrlner, for
$137,60, the same property.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
THE EVENING CRITIC.
EaTA BI,IsUED August 1898
AN ABDUCTION CASE,
But.One which, Il Seems, the Law
emit Finnish.


Detectives McElfresh and voss arrested a
young man named George McCullom this
afternoon at the request of lady, who com.
planned that her daughter had been led astray
and abducted by the young man. Tho girl
was only ID years OF age, but had been recoiv-
Ing tho attentions and visits of the prisoner,
md had left her parents house with him on
Monday evening. Tho girl failod to return,
md the mother sought out Mr.. McCuliom, who
disclaimed oil knowledge OF tho girls where.
abouts after ! / p. m. on Monday, at which hour
no eaid he took her home. The young man
still denies knowing where tho girl 10, al.
though no is said to have been seen with her
last night.
Detective voss subsequently arrested the
yaung lady. who is large for her age and quito
beautiful The frail maiden confessed to leav-
Ing home with the young man and spending
the night with him Mt hotel. McCullen was
released from custody, rs tho case was one OF
class not reached by the defective laws Of the
District. II ia much TO be regretted that there
is no institution hero for the care OF such
young women who, owing 70 their youth, have
not sank below the possibility OF reclamation,
and whose beauty and experience make their
positions so perilous. Tho young woman was
reprimnnded and restored to her parents.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
The Internal Revenue ColIectorship.

The Baltimore Sun, In Its Washington corre-
spondonce to-day, has the following with regard
to the successor Of Mr.. Proud, Collector Of In.
ternal Revenue, whose Jurisdiction extends
over the District OF Columbia: 1.-THE delay Of
the President in selecting the successor OF
Mr.. Proud may prove dangerous to those who
were short time ago considered loading can.
didatcs for the position. During the past few
days quiet but determined effort has been
made to have Mr.. A. NJ. Clnpp appointed.
Messrs. L. b. Tyler, A. W. Spates and Thomas
X. Ritch, OF Maryland, saw the Secretary Of
the Treasury yesterday, and drew most 1atter-
Ing pictures OF Mr.. Clapp's ability and his
meritorious' claims upon the Administration.
The Secretary said he was not clear as to
whether 1t would be advisable for the Presi-
dent TO appoint a nonresident OF Maryland.
He promised to submit the question to tho
President for his consideration, which he did
today. The result OF the conference between
the President and Secretary could not be
ascertained. The Secretary says Mr.. Ditty is
not thought to be physically able to perform
the duties OF the ofllce. Secretary Folger said
to your correspondent to-day that no was posi-
tive the President had not yet decided TO APP
point Mr.. Weatherby, Notwithstanding the
announcement that the President had OK
pressed himself as favorable to that gentle
man. The outlook for Mr.. Clapp is said by
his friends to be- growing brighter and
brighter every moment. II Is asserted that Mr..
Creswell and many other Maryland Republi-
cans would have no serious objection to the
appointment OF that gentleman.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
AMUSEM ENTS.
Theatre Comiquo Summer Garden.

Thentre COmfquo summer Garden.
The attractions at tho Comique this week are
Numerous and interesting. Tho "French
Spy" is well put on and splendidly acted. Tho
variety bill Is very good. Matinees tomorrow
and Saturday. The Wesley brothers have made
great hit this week and arc pronounced
great cards by all who have seen them.
Abner's Garden.
This popular resort has had most success
ful run this season. The garden is crowded
every night, and the concerts arc OF the most
pleasing character.
Drivers Garden.
An evening Of real enjoyment can always Do
spent at George Drivers famous Summer Gar.
den. The performances, variety and musical,
nro always frst.class, and large audiences are
regularly In attendance.
THE INSPECTOR OF PLUMBING has made
TO tho Health onlcer Il report urging the prohi-
billion OF certain practices In vogue In George.
town which arc preIudicial TO the public
health. Among the nuisances named are tho
failure to provide with proper traps the pas.
eages into sewers for privy purposes, the
scarcity OF arrangements for flushing sewer
connections, the draining OF houses into vaults
and dry wells In manner polluting the ontlro
vicinity and ,endangering the health OF tho
neighborhood.
GENERAL NJ. @. MEIas was granted
permit to-day TO build brick dwelling on
street, near Fourteenth, at an expense OF
$4,000.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02

TAKE the Saturday excursion to Deer
Park and Oakland August 3. Faro for tho
round trip, $3.50, including one days board
at either hotel. Tickets good going on any
train Saturday and returning on all trains
Monday. For further Information apply nj
Baltimore n Ohio ticket ofllces, 1851 and 610
Pennsylvania avenue, and at depot.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02

Savannah, Ga, fines policemen who go to
sleep while on duty $40 for each offonso.
And it's blooming mean cook who don't help
poor fellow to keep awake by leaning over
the back gate and talking 70 him.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02

The first excursion Of the Mutual Fishing
Club at Great Falls August was very en-
joyable affair, Notwithstanding the inclemency
Of the weather. The steamer Excelsior loft
Georgetown at 1880 q. m. with as pleasant q
party aboard as ever glided over tho raging
canal. On the arrival OF the party at the falls
J; A: Johnson, J.: W. Hunter, a: Jones, Or: r. s.
Watts, william Mayse aud j. Morrison left the
party for the fishing grounds in search Of the
fino bass for which tho locality Is 30 Justly
noted, and returned after an absence Of nearly
three hours very wet, but well.laden with line
bass.
Among those present on the excursion we
noticed DR.. R: Watts and lady, Sidney McFar-
land and family, Judge 8. Lee, OF 8. O.; +. O.
Reyells, J. A. johnson and family, ]. II. Davis
and family, Mr.. E. jackson, II. Webb, esq,
Samuel Jackson,J j. Il. Reeves, j. Brooks and
lady, NJ. Priest and sistor, Miss J. Moore, Mr..
and Mrs. Irwin, j. W. Hunter, Miss l.. speed,
II. Turly and lady, +. Freeman and lady and
others.
The officers Of tho club are president, ]. L..
Webster; secretary, J. A. Johnson; treasurer,
+. Freeman. Members: y. Murray, 1r., Jno.
W. Hunter, J. D. Deveaux, DR.. s. II. Watts, Sol.
Hunter, j. r. Davis, Chas. II. Harryday.
The excursion will DO repeated August 81.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
FINANCIAL.
To.day,s Stock Ouotations,

The following observations OF the transac
tions in the financial market to-day, together
with opening and closing quotations, are fur
nished by the banking house of II. d. Cooke, IT.,
& Co., 1929 street, Washington, ID. O.:
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02

Boys are so very careless and impulsivo
whore their pleasures are concerned. Two
Brooklyn juveniles were severely punished
last week for stoning their mothers new bon
net under the impression that II was wasp's
nest.--Br00klyn Eagle.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
LOWER CEDAR POINT.
CwAsHINoToNs coNEY IsLAND)
Select Daily Family Excursions

The palace steamer JANE MosELEY, will
make excursons to this popular resort, COM
mepcing SUNDAY, June %, leaving wharf foot
OF Sixth street DAILY, except Mondays, at $50 a.
m. The management reserves the right TO take
up any tickets at boat and return money for same.
Positively no improper characters allowed on
boat or grounds.
Staterooms reserved for families.
Salt water bathing, fishing, dancing on waxed
floor, &c, and q shore dinner Music by Prof.
Pistorios Brass and String Band.
TICKETS Ground 80 cts.
For further Information apply ut ~. Marc
Hotel.
EB Special arrangements made with societies,
clubs and other ORGANIZATIONS. ju26tf
ITO! FOR GREAT FALLS AND CABIN
IL JOHN BRIDGET
The steamer Excelsior, canal packet, will make
her regular ,rips to The 1boye placss9n MORAY,
leaving her wharf. Congress street and Canal. at
Can be chartered Tuesday Thursday and satur-
day. For Information, inquire at CRAY d Hill
TONS. 20S 9th Ct, opposite Centre Market, or q.
w. WEBSTER. iii 4th ST. n. W. julia
DLEASURE BOATS, OF the latest styles, to
L hire Mt nll times on very reasonable terms,
Passeno, 1884 and 3i36 Water st., near High St.
Georgetown. ID G. luq3m
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02

R. P. DODGE, VIM. Forsythe and VIM. o.
assess damage by opening an alley In square
l5D.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
DIED.

DIED.
HOWE.-On Wednesday, August 2, Robert
Cowdin, infant son of DR.. Frank +. and Maria
F. Howe, aged months and 10 days.
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
OUANTIoo PAVILION.
GRAND EXCURSION RESORT.

GRAND EXCURSION RESORT.
Delightful salt water bathing, beating, fishing,
croquet, shooting gallery, archery, quolts, ETC..
etc.
Immense Dancing Pavilion.
Prof Cooks Brass string Band every day.
The Popular Steamer keyport from Seventh
street wharf ut o. a. m. and3 p. m. sundays at
. R Il; IL 4plTf TICKETS so CENTS. chill.
DRfN. 10 cents
Greatly reduced rates to churches, societies and
Others
Arrangements can be made to stop at any
point on the river. iyH
The Evening critic., 1882-08-02
Warrington stock Exchange.

Tho following are the closing quotations OF
the Washington Stock Exchange to-day:
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1882-09-23

s@Charity and personal force are
the only investment worth anything.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1882-09-23
HOUSEHOLD MANAGEMENT.
Some Thoughts Worthy the Attention OF
Our Lady Readers.

John Ruskin, in his advice to young
ladies, says: "Resolve to do each day
something useful in the vulgar sense
Learn the economy OF the kitchen, both
good and bad qualities Of every common
article of food, the simplest and best
modes OF their preparation help poor
families in cooking, show them how to
make their niceties coaxing and tempt
ing them into pretty ways. and pleading
for wcll-folded table cloths, however
coarse, and for flower or two out Of
the garden to strcw on them. She
should At the end of every day be able
TO say, rs proudly rs any peasant, that
she had not eaten the bread Of idleness.
In no civilized country in the world are
young ladies of wealth brought up in
such utter ignorance Of the science Of
housekeeping as in America. We teach
our girls to be ornamental, but there
their education ceases. A practical
knowledge Of the culinary art is not
thought of, or is considered unworthy
the consideration of the American girl,
who is ambitious to become accomplish
ed. Cookery, in this country, does not
enter the list /; but what is more essen
tial to the home comforts than that the
mistress of the home should be familiar
with the moRaS 9peydaG Of preparing
her breakfast? Men have not changed
since the savant wrote that "the way to
a mans heart is through his stomach"
and many an unhappy wife will bear
testimony that her troubles began
through her ignorance Of the ways Of
her kitchen. The men who are satish-
cd to have their wives good mathema-
ticans and to know little Of housekeep-
ing are few and far between, and they
are waking up to the importance Of a
more thorough education Of the women
whom they would make their wives
Bad servants are the outgrowth Of gen.
erations Of bad housekeepers, and we
shall hear fewer complaints on this score
when cooking is practically taught in
our homes and in our higher schools
and colleges for young women.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1882-09-23

p6rEducation begins the gentleman,
but reading, good company and refec-
ton must finish him.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1882-09-23
Nothing short Of UumistaLnblc
Bcueflts

Conferred upon tens of thousands Of sufferers could
originate aud maintain the reputation which
ArEH's SARsArAniLLA enjoys. IL IL compound
Of the best vegetable alteratiyes with the Iodides
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IL the most eectual Of all remedies for scrofuious
mercuriai. or blood disorders. Uniformly success
ful aud certain, il produces rapid and complete
cures Of Scrofuia. Sores, Boils, numors, Pimples,
Eruptons, Skin Diseases aud all disorders arising
from impuriiy Of the blood. by its invigorating
effects Il always relieves aud often cures Liver
Complaints, Female weakncsses and Ireguiari-
ties, and IL potent rcnswer of waning vitality
For purifying the blood IL has no equal. Il tones
up the system. restores and preserves the health,
aud imparts vigor and energy. For forty years
II has been In extensive use. and is to-day the
most available medicine for the suffering sick
Fee sale by all druggists. =.