Daily Republican., 1882-01-23
BREvITIES.
0u1 nDo0 q IX. .... ....Hun ssts5 %
For cut flowers, 20 to 400 King street.
n-.< a 49,. ...,


Hest family ooal st on ". Front street.
Breeding cages cheap at the sac store.
Try Bradford's Ready MIXED Cottage
Oolors.
The cheapest roof paint, at Bradford
Paint Store.
Parker, cupplng and leeching, los 4. Sec
ond street.
Clean and polish your furniture with Brad
f0rd's Furniture Polish.
Paint your houses with pure Kent Lead
ground by James Bradford.
Fine IL X. Pain Gold Rings, at Z. Z
| Hanfs, 10 East Fourth street.
| Use the Crown Axle Grease, the best In tn
| market, at James Brad fords.
Get your photographs at Hollands gallery
No Third street. two doors East Of Market
Just received, new stock Of I.andreth's gar.
den seeds. A. X. Tatnall, 7l3 W. Front st.
8 fine card photographs for 81, atAolIand' .
gallery, No. 4 Third street, between Market
and King.
Job had patience but then Job never tried
to back Carriage into marrow shed on u
dark night.
| Tonsor nj item "Im down on yoa, :" as his
small mustache remarked to the youthful
| Pillikens
1t IL better to stand the most pinching p0v-
erty than to bex-unless you are Fix and
havn't trump.
some one says talk is cheap. 1t is To' when
It comes 10 the extra session of a Leg stature,
and nus be paid for by the State.
lfyeu want first class parlor suit made
| to order for low price, 70 to W. W. Wood
wards, sixth and Tatnail streets.
For bargains in furniture aod bedding, 20
to l.. +. Adair's, 207 Market street and see
his goods and learn his prices.
Thirty thousand dollars worth Of tobacco
was smoked Ia one night at Richmond Va.
1t was at the burning Of a tobacco factory.
The man who signs, How s,on we are for
gotten " has only to leave hotel without
paying his bill, to find how sadly, sadly mis-
.aken he is.
A Phil 'delphia clergyman. who is a great
athlete and lover OF sports, forgot himself
one, and said Here endeth the first IN
nings let US pray"
A London newspaper says that short honey
moons are the fashion now. II Is presumed
the honeymoon ends when the last quarter is
reached.
A New jersey man can take load OF saw.
dust and transform 1t into II gallon Of good
whiskey, and if science can 70 lny further
than that let her slide.
The rats are so thick In the school house at
little boys tO stay after school and learn their
lessons.
Whenwe hear OF man. boast Of the length of
his ancestry we arc reminded Of the quaint
saving Of the farmer The older the saed
the worse the crop"
A man had better pass for cent n the
currency OF h te.loas and be worth the mon.
ey, than to go + Il dollar and be sid out fl
nally ut discount Of s91a per cent.
Texas complains Of too many newspapers.
1t Is getting 50 that a gentleman can't take
hand In a ly ching or eve0 D0in in a free
night without having his name in print.
mo, sn d the bank cashier, did not need
the money. wasn't speculatng, had no
necessity for stealing it but hang it, /
didn't want to be called eccentric.
Never forget that 1t is your duty 70 laugh
whenever you tlnd anything to laugh at. A
good laugh, so says Charles Lamb, is worth Il
hundred gr0ans in any state of the market.
There was once, in the ncighborhood of
ROuen, q III Hers daughter so pretty and so
cruel that the siJh of her lovers alone we'd
| to turn le sails of her fathers mill,
Stories first heard At mothers knee are
never forgotten. 1t is the samc with some
other things received at a mothers knee,
which will readily occur to our readers.
A would-be journalist drops line to In.
qnire, What must do To write tucntly 2"
sharpen up your sncil and your wits my
son, and write it thus-f-l-u-s-n-t-ly."
"Are you feelirg very Ill ?'' asked the rhy.
sician 'et mo look ut your tongue, please?
'lts no use DOCTOR replied the patent, mo
tongue can tell how bad fecl.'
great many articles in daily use na well
regulated family, will at times, get misplaced
and lost, but somehow, people always man.
age to keep ifty.twO cards together.
Tp,, nfth pt, 10 I, lyy'. I,t !
off and was run over by broad Wheeled cart.
The ribbons were somewhat soied, but The
hat Is now the very latest fall shape.
So your daughter has married q rich hus-
band We'll, slowly, replied the father. be-
lieve she has married II rich man, but un-
derstand he Is a very poor husband.
Abraham Lincoln would never fight a duel
but it was generally believed that the man
who should pu ! his nose would want three
cotans as quick as a wagon could bring them.
Nervous lady passenger on the train after
we are now on terra tirma. Facetious gentle
many es ma am, less terror and more firm
er,
A Wisconsin man stole thirty nine sheep
and q steer but the warrant charged him
with stealing thirty nine steers and a sheep,
and he left the courtroom with all his repu-
tatiOn restored,
Financial and commercial "In mercan
tile houses it is always dee ned best to be
cautious in crossing the "t's and ttlng the
"i's" but In broken banks, the dctaulting
cashiers chief thoughts are to cross the ''c's."
Sir Wllfred Lawson, the temperance advo-
cate, IS also known as Il successful cattle
breeder. he once bought q bull at an ex-
travagant price from the Duke OF Devon
shire 1t was found dsad recentls. and, with
q rcgretful look at the Diseased beast, the
genial baronet, on the spur Of the moment,
struck of the following epitaph:
"Here lies Baron Oxford 9th,
Quiet and cool,
Bred by n luke and
Bought by a fool"
'Tis said that thirty inches span