Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1882-08-04
Missing Men.

An old detective who dropped I'M
on the gang" at the Central, the other
morning, was in a communicative mood
on the topic of missing people, and
prefaccd a singular story with the fol-
lowing words: "There was man from
n town in this State, not very far away
from here, who acted the funniest you
ever see, and if his folks hadn't been
pretty fly it would have made the best
missing-man story for the papers ever
heard" The story, stripped OF the ver-
nacular of the old detective, runs in
this wise: A merchant in one of the in
land towns went to the bank and drew
1000. He went from there to his mar
ket-place, purchased three spring chick
ems, had them dressed, sent them to his
house with note to his wife asking her
to have them prepared in particular
manner, suitable to his epicurean taste,
adding that he would be at home at six
o'clock p. m. promptly, with friend
who would spend the evening with the
host and hostess. The wife was one of
those rare women whose happiness was
always most supreme when she was
contributing to the comfort of her hus-
band. They were the model man and
wife of the Sucker hamlet, and their lives
together made harmonious combination
by which the good people of the place
really seemed to regulate their own do
nestle pleasures The dinner was ready
at the hour, and the little wife sat ON the
doorstep of her cottage awaiting the
coming of her lord and his companion.
A remark of the detective at this point
of the story is too much to the point to
be changed: "She hung out there till it
was pitch dark, and the chicken was as
cold as the stone step she was sitting
on, and then she began to get tidgety."
In response to the inquiry OF mes
senger sent down town, it was learned
that he had not invited his friend to
dinner and that the last seen of him he
was boarding train bound for Chicago.
1t was further learned that he was per-
fectly sober; in fact, he had never been
known to be an excessive drinker. A
weeks absence brought no tidings of
his whereabouts, and his wife, accom-
panied by several friends, came to Chi
cago to make inquiries. Not trace
could be found. New York officials
were notified, and the steamship officers
consulted. No tidings came back. Liv-
tIpOoi i<OllNlol ItbcCkiNt
were furnished with the mans photo
graph and the details of his habits, but
never word of information was re-
ceived from them. The wife gave him
up for dead, the supposition being that
he had come to Chicago, had been
robbed. killed and thown into the lake,
which seems to be forever at the com.
mand of the murderous thugs who in.
fest this city. The day on which he
left home was the 18th OF November
1881. (The skeptcal reader must beal
in mind that there are spring chickens
in this latitude in the autumn.) About
the 1st of May q Monarch line
steamer lay in the bay in front OF
New York City, and two Illinois men
waved their handkerchiefs to their ma
tive land. One of these men was q
Chicagoan, the otlier was from the in.
land town. The Chicago man came
home, and he told the story to the de.
tectives that he had met his acquaint.
ance in coffee-house in the Strand
that the man was drunk and yerging OF
delirium. He sobered him up" anC
got him on board the steamer. A!
they were en- route home the inlant
man told him about buying chicken!
for dinner, and his intention of hav
ing delightful evening home. Tha
he went to the depot to pay a freigh
bill and passenger train thundered in
That instantaneously the thought cam,
To him to run up to Chicago for night
intending to telegraph his wife to tina
effect. As soon as he reached this cit,
it occurred to him to get drunk. Thei
he went to New York and continue,
his spree. While having jolly GOO
time he concluded to go to Europe, an
bought a ticket giving an assume,
name, and embarked drunk. He wa
drunk all the way over. He went I
Liverpool, London, Glasgow, cam
: back to London, crossed the channel
, drunk all the time-went to Paris, re
|, mained drunk, came back to Liverpool
then to London again, where the CHI
cago man found him. When the
touched New York the inland tow
man said: Il am going to the tele
graph Office to send message to IN
: wife to have those chickens warme
over. 1t will be the first informatio
she has had of my movements since
sent the chickens home. ChicaS
, Times.