The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-10-10
MASHED" TIE WAX WOMAN.
The Bad Boy and His Pa 60 to the
Exposition.

The Bad Boy and His Pa 60 to the
Exposition.
"What was the doctor at your house
for this morning ?" asked the grocery
man. lis your ma sick ?"
.sNo, ma is worth two in a bush
It's pa that amt well. He il having
some trouble with his digestion. You
see, he went to the Exposition with
me as guide, and that is enough to
ruin any mans digestion. Pa is near
sighted, and he said he wanted me to
go along and show him things. Well.
| never had SO much fun since pa fell
out OF the boat. First, l made him
Jump nc, oss the aisle, there where the
stuffed tigers are, by the furniture place.
| iold him the keeper was just coming
along with some meat to iced the
animals, and when they smelled the
meat they just clawed things. He run
against a show case, and then wanted
to 20 away. Ee said he travelled
with a circus when he was young.
and no one knew the dangers of foOling
around wild animals better than he
did. "Well. you would died to see
pa there by the furniture place, where
they have got beautiful beds an(
chairs. There was one blue chair
under a glass case. all velvet, and
sign was over it, telling people to
keep their hands OF. Pa asked me
what the sign was, and l told him it
said ladies and gentlemen are requested
to sit in the chairs and try them. Pa
climed over the railing and was Just
going to sit in on the glass show case
over the chair, when one Of the walk
around fellows with police hats took
him by the collar and yanked him
hack over the railing. and was going
to kick pas pants. Pa was mad to
have his coat collar pulled over his
head, and have the set of his coat
spoiled. and was going to sass the
man, when l told pa that the man was
lunatic from The asylum. that was
on exhibition, and pa wanted to GO
away from there. BE said he didn't
know what they wanted to exhibit
lunatics for. We went upstairs to the
pancake bazarr, where they broil
pancakes out of selfraising -four.
and put butter and sugar on them
and give them away. Pa said he
could eat more pancakes than any
man out of Jail. and wanted me to
get some. | took a couple of pancakes
and tore out a piece of the lining of
nv coat and put it between the pan
cakes and handed them to pa,
with paper around the pancakes. Pa
didn't notice the paper nor the cloth,
and it would have made you laugh
to see him chew on them. 1 told him
l guessed he didn't have as good teeth
as be used to, and he said Never you
mind the teeth, and he kept on till
he swallowed the whole business, but
he guessed he didn't want any more.
But thought ] should split when
be wanted drink of water. l asked
him if he druther have mineral water,
and he said he guessed it would take
the strongest kind of mineral water
TO wash down them pancakes, so l
took him to where the fire extinguisher
are, and got him take the rozzle of the
extinguisher in his mouth, and l
turned the faucet. [ don't think he
got more than a quart of the saleratus
machine down him, but he rared right
up and said led be condemned if he
believed that water was ever intended
to drink, and be felt as though he
should bust, and just then the man
who kicks the big organ struck up,
and the building shook, and | guess
pa thought he had busted. The most
fun was when he came along to where
the wax woman is. They have got
a wax woman dressed up to kill, and
she looks just as natural as she could
breathe. She has handkerchief in
her hand, as we came along / told pa
there was lady that seemed to know
him. Pa is on the mash hisself, and
he looked at her and smiled and said
good-evening, and asked me who she
was. told him it looked to me like
the girl that sings in the CHOIR at our
church, and pa said corse it is, and he
went right in where she was and said
pretty good show, isn't it, and put
out his hand to shake hands with her,
but the woman who tends the stand
came along and thought pa was drunk
and said, Old gentleman, l guess you
had better get out of here. This is
for ladies only Pa excused himself
to the wax woman. and said he would
see her later. milwaukee Sun.
Mrs. Jesse James doesn't seem to be