The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1882-11-16
sPooPENDYKE.

my dearw exclaimed Mr.. Spoopendyke, drop
ping his razor, and examining his chin with
startling eyess, "Iny dear, bring some court plas-
ter quick Eve piowed off half my chimp
''Let me seei' demanded Mrs. Spoopendyke,
bObbing up and tuttering around her husband.
"Great gracious, what a cutl Wait O minute
and she shot into the closet and out again.
Quick :" roared Mr.. Spoependyke, I'm bleed
ing to death! Fetch me that court plssterr
..0h, dear" m0aned Mrs. Spoopendyke. az
put it-oh, where did put it 7"
"Dod CAST the puttyr' yelled Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, who had heard his wife imperfectly.
"What dye think this is, crack in the wall
Got some sort of 4 notion that there is a draught
through here : Court plaster, l tell yet Bring
me some court plaster before pull out the side
of the house, and get some from the neighbors!'
Just then it appeared to Mrs. Spoopendyke
that she had put the plaster in the clock.
''Here it is, dearr and she shipped OFF piece
and handed it to him.
Mr.. Spoopendyke put it on the end of his
tongue, holding his thumb over the wound.
When it thoroughly wetted, it stuck fast
to his finger, while the carnage ran down his
chin. He jabbed away at the cut. but the plas-
ter hung to the digit until finally his patience
was thoroughly exhausted.
whats the matter with the measly busnessfr
he yelled. ''Where'd We buy this plasteri Come
of. dOd CAST yen and as he plucked it off his
finger, it grew to his thnmb. "Stick, will We r.
he squealed, plugging at the cut in his chin.
ttdNt ~ iudt WnlEicu dEOuuu
his heel and pegged at it again. ''Why don't
We bring me some conrt plaster p he shrieked,
turning on his trembling wife. "Who asked We
for a leechi' Bring me something that knows
a thumb from a chin," and he planted his
thumb On the wound, and screwed il around
viIIdictively. This time the plaster let go, and
slipped up TO the corner of his mouth.
snow it's all right, dear smiled Mrs. Spoop-
endyke, anxious to secure peace in the family.
Ii is all right, now
Think it is, do We :" raved Mr.. Spoopendyke.
with fearful grin. MAY he you've got the
same idea that conrt plaster has. P'raps yon
think that mouth was cut with a razorf May
be you're under the impression that this hole in
my visage was meant to succumb to the per-
suasion of bit of plaster! Come of, Let go
that mouth ~ and he gave il a wipe, il stuck
to the palm of his hand, as though it had been
born there.
'.Let me try" suggested Mrs. spoopendyke /;
81 know how to do it,"
''Then, why didn't We do it at first r. howled
Mr.. Spoopendyke. .'What did We want to wait
until I'd lost three gallons of gore for. Oh, you
know how TO do it! You only want linen
back and bottle of mucilage up your side to
be Comfy hospital' Stick. dod CAST yer
and he clasped the wrong hand over his jaw.
III hold We there till ye stick, if hold ye till
my wife learns something" and Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke praneed uD and down the room with face
indicative of stern determination.
"Let me see. dear" said his wife, approach
ing him with a smile; and gently drawing away
his had, she deity adjusted another piece Of
plaster.
THAT was my piece, after all" growled Mr.
SpOopendyke, cycling the job, and CHANGING at
the palm of his hand, to find his piece of plas-
ter gone. lyon always come in after the fu-
neral"
al guess You'll find your piece sticking in the
other hand, dear" said Mrs. Spoopendyke,
pleasantly.
"0f course you can tell, snorted MI. Spoop-
endyko, verifying his wife's assertion with a
glance. If / had your insight and full pack of
cards, I'd hire shot tower and set up for an
astronomer" and Mr.. Spoopendyke, who evil
blood-staned court plaster on his hand all day
long, rather than admit, by taking it of, that
his wife had ever been right in anything
Brooklyn Eagle.