The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1882-06-29
PLEASANTRIES.

1
A NAN is known by the company he
Keeps out Of.
WHEN he came home tipsy he told his
wife he had been out sherrynading.
TO MAKE successful run for Office
man must initiate snow. He must come
down occasionally.
II WISH l was a pudding, mamma"
"Why?" "'Cause I would have q lot
Of sugar put into me-"
"Ir is only after long reflection that i
go to an entertainment with any young
man, said the maiden to her mirror.
WHEN woman leaves man who has
not earned his salt for years, he immedi-
ately advertises that he will pay no debts
of her contracting.
"A CERTAIN gentleman must have been
very proud of his wife when he des-
cribed her as "beautiful, dutiful, youth
ful. and an srmtulp
ELI PERKINS says Texas is the largest
State in the Union. Now the State will
have to be surveyed all over again to
ascertain If that is so.-T Tenas SIftings.
"TH1s is a sad commentary on our
boasted civilization" a tramp despend-
ingly observed, when he discovered that
the ham he had taken from the front of
q shop was wooden one.
A PERFECT jam is made of plum, and
yet perfect jamb is never out of plumb.
"Think of it, says the Emigrant Gaul,
"and yet Frenchmen are expected to
write good English just the same"
GA GOOD husband makes good wife,"
says a philosopher, but he stops there,
and don't say what he makes her do.
Probably build the fire for him in the
morning and sit up late for him at night.
"WHAr kind of mark is that ?" said
Magrady to his friend Talthorpe, point
ing to scar on his face. "It's ques-
ton mark, replied the other "got it
for asking man if it was hot enough
for him. '"-Puck.
SCENE: bridal reception. Several of
the guests, after shaking hands with the
bride, and all speaking at the same time:
"Where is the bridegroom" Bride.
naively: "0h, he's up stairs watching
the wedding presents"
81 SAY, when does this train leave?"
"What are you asking me for? Go to
the conductor m the engineer" at
know you're the engineer; but you
might give man civil answer" "Yes,
but m no civil engineer"
RELATIONSHIPS are rather far-fetched
sometimes, both in Ireland and Scot
land. "Do you know Tom Duffy,
Pat?" "Know him, is it2" says Pat,
"sure he's near relation of mine he
once wanted to marry my sister, Kate"
The following laconic correspond
ence is reported in Maine paper:
M. Y" Do me the favor to lend me
dollar to get my COW out of the pound"
G A. D.-"I would. but 1 paid my last
dollar to the boys to take the COW to the
pound"
A YOUNG couple have just begun
housekeeping and wish to engage a
maid-of all-work. Josephine presents
herself. After detailing the duties re-
quired, the lady of the house remarks:
"Well, my good girl, I think you will
be suited; the work is light, and we
have no children" Josephine with a
gracious smirk)-"Oh, madam, do not
put yourself out on my account, beg.
1 adore them"
"MY poor boy" exclaimed the anx-
ious mother, unwinding the bandage
that was wrapped around his "right
duke" and exposing to view the skinned
and bleeding knuckles, show did you
ever come to do it? What an awful
looking hand If confagration or eerie-
sipletum should set in, what would your
unfortnit father say?" The poor boy
didn't seen to take a very ready grip on
he problem thus presented in reference
to his paternal parent, but his facs Lit
up with something like savage satisfac-
ton as he observed: "If you think that's
awful, mother, you ought to see Bill
| Stebbins' nose