The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-10-15
Talk Between the Sexes.


To two classes we pay court :
woman and the aged. But the
superiority of woman is perpetualIv
menaced; they do not sit throned
on indrmities like the old: they
are suitors as well as sovereigns
their vanity is engaged, their af-
fections are too apt to follow; and
hence much of the talk between
the sexes degenerates into some
thing unworthy of the name. The
desire to please, to shine with par
tlcular engaging lustre, to draw a
fascinating picture Of oneself, ban
lshes from conversation all that is
sterling and most of what is humor-
Gus. AS soon as a strong current
OF mutual admiration begins to
flow, the human interest triumphs
entirely over the intellectual, and
the commerce of words, consciously
or not, becomes secondary to the
commencing of eyes. Each simply
waits upon the other TO be admired,
and the talk dWindles into plati-
tudlnous piping. Coquetry and
faulty are thus the knell Of talk.
But even where this ridiculous dam
ger IS avoided, and man and
woman converse equally and
honestly, something in their nature
or their education falsihes the strain.
An instinct prompts them to agree !;
and where that is impossible, to
agree to differ. Should they neglect
the warning, at the first suspicion of
an argument, they find themselves
in different hemispheres. About any
point OF business or conduct, any
actual affair demanding settlement,
a woman will speak and listen, hear
and answer arguments, not only
with natural wisdom, but with can
dortand logical honesty. But if the
subject of deb1te be something in
the air, an excuse for talk, logical
Aunt Sally, then may the male de-
batter instantly abandon hope; he
may employ reason, adduce facts, be
supplied, be smiling, be angry, all
shall avail him nothing; what the
woman said first, that unless she
has forgotten it, she will repeat at
the end. Hence. at the very juno
lures when talk between men
grows brighter and quicker, and
begins to promise to bear fruit,
talk between the sexes is me-
nanced with dissolution The
point Of difference, the point of
interest, is evaded by the brilliant
woman, under a shower Of irrelevant
conversational rockets; it is bridged
by the discreet woman with rustic
silk, as she passes smoothly forward
to the nearest point of safety. 1t
cannot be discussed, or not in its
natural connection. 1t may be re-
turned upon after circuit; and if
propounded as q problem, with
neither party committed to side,
it may then be gently, lightly, but
in the end, thoroughly treated. This
sort of prestidigitation, juggling the
dangerous hope out of sight until it
can be reintroduced with safety III
an altered shape, isa piece of tac-
ties among the true drawing room
queens.
The drawing room is indeed an
artificial place; it is so by our choice
and for our sins. The subsection of
women, the ideal imposed upon
them from the cradle and worn, like
a hair shirt with so much con-
stancy, their motherly, superior ten
derness to mans vanity and self
Importance, their managing arts
the arts of a civilized slave among
good-natured barbarians-are all
painful ingredients, and all help to
falsify relations. It is not till we
get clear of that amusing, artificial
scene that genuine relations are
founded or ideas honestly COM
pared. In the garden, on the
road OF the hillside, OF tete-a-
tete, and apart from Interruptions
occasions may arise when we may
learn much from any single woman
and nowhere more often than in
married life. :, Marriage is one long
conversation, chequered by disputes.
The disputes are simply valUeless
they but ingram the difference;
| the heroic heart of woman
prompts her at once to nail her col
lors to the mast. But in the inter
walls, almost unconsciously, with nc
desire to shine, the whole material
of life is turned over and over, ideas
are struck out and shared, the tive
persons more and more adapt theiI
notions one to suit the other, and in
process of time, without sound OF
trumpet, they conduct each other
into new worlds of thought.-Con-