The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1882-04-15
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

1t takes the whole Legislature to
change mans name. A woman. can
change hers by the act of single man.
81 would box your ears" said
young lady to her stupid and tiresome
admirer, Elf" '.f what?' he anx-
iously inquired. "If 1 could get box
large enough for the purpose" she re-
piled.
"A Cincinnati lady disguised herself
as book agent and made twenty-six
calls at different offices. She says she
had no idea that old, gray-headed men
could tell such sweet lies and be so de.
.ceiving.-Detrou Free Press.
Young man, if you had one and
two-third tons of gold coin, you would
be worth just million dollars. Every
little piece of gold you get hold of throw
into the junk pile until you accumulate
that weight. You can then sell it and
be come rich man-New Haven Reqis-
ter.
The great apostle of the esthetes was
asked the other day which of all the nu-
merals he thought the most truly beauti-
full and serenely lovely. "Why, four,
to be sure" he replied with an air of
inexpressible languor. ssAhd whyP'
asked his fair questioner ssBecause it's
two twos." And that was all he said
that day. - ~
"A boy. who had always refused to
eat oatmeal, in spite of his mothers
urgings that it was a strengthening diet,
suddenly surprised her one morning by
eating liberal plateful- and calling for
more. Upon his mother asking for an
explanation, he replied: 81 am bound
to eat oatmeal till / am strong enough
to whip Johnny Scott"
=" How do you like the character Of
St. PaulP" asked a parson of his land
lady one day, during conversation
about the saints and apostles. "Ah, he
was a good, clever old soul, / know"
replied the landlady, ''for he once said,
you know, that we must eat what is set
before us and ask no questions for con-
Science sake. / always thought should
like him for boarder. Modern Argo.
Music and Millinery.-"Good morn
ing, Fogg," said Brown, briskly. ..How
did You Ike the opera last nightp'' 80,
$685." answered Fogg, modify; moth
drumrstiobs 9! Ne, come" returned
Brown. be serious. Didn't you think
that bravurs passage with pizzicato and
appogiatura ellishmentS Were love-
Typ 2. Guess didn't see answered
Fogg, as.before; q there was only festh-
ers and doWGrRand things on the one in
front of me. - What are talking
about, manp" exclaimed Brown. THAT
girls hat, of course. Wasn't you?"
:" Good morning" said Brown, as he
turned the corner. Puck.
. AT meeting Of some colored breth-
rem it was decided to make q collection.
The President concluded to pass the hat
himself, and, in order to encourage the
Others, he pnt in ten-cent piece After
the collection. during which every hand
hid been IN the hat, the President ap-
proachsdsthe table, turned the hat up
side down. and not even his own con-
tribution dropped out He opened his
eyes with establishment, he exclaimed:
" Fo' goodness, but I'ze chen lost de ten
cents T started widr' Then there was
CONSERVATION on the faces of the as
.sembly. Who was the lucky man? That
was the question. It was evidently a
hopeless case. and was summed up by
one brother, who rose in his place, and
said. solemly, {" Oar pears to be great
moral lesson roup' heah somewhar."