Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1882-12-22
F. u n

BUYING 4 LOAD OF WooD.-Brigh,
and early the other morning farmer ar
rived at the eastern market with load OF
four-foot wood, and the first pei son to ac-
cost him was . woman who asked:
''How much for the wood ~
"Four dollars"
"Have you got over cord there?;'
eyes"
'I'u give S. .50.''
Cant do it,"
I'm a widow with six Children
':Can't help that ma'am-the price is
four dollars
She disappeared, but it was dull day
in the wood market, and at the end of ri
hour when she retained the man was still
there.
SIS this the same load?' she asked.
1.-The very same"
ssAll dry wood?"
EVERY stick of it,
mo rotten chunks in the centef?"
''If there's single one I'll give you the
whole load"
Then I'll give you $780,
Cant do it,"
II am a widow with sick husband and
seven children to support
es, know, but four dollars is the
price"
At noon she came again and offered the
same price, and although he still refused.
a bright idea popped into his head. He
drove around the corner and unloaded al
most quarter OF a cord, rearranged his
blankets on the loard, and drove back to
the stand. In about half an hour the woman
passed by ard called out:
''Havn't you sold yet?"
MOI
--..ftim sivs yea $3.50 in sllver-all in quar-
terra
well, 1 guess III cake it, and I'd az lief
have silver as enythin gels
He drove six bloc Though the mud
with a grin on bis mouth. and he cackled
and chuckled over the JOKE as be unloaded
the wood. She placed fourteen quarters ii
his hand as he finished, and he hurried
off as he saw her looking over the pile
That might have ended the transaction.
of the next twenty minutes man closely
resembling the wood seller was seen to halt
\ policeman on Gratiot avenue. go down
onto his pocket fourteen successive times.
After quarter dollars, and when he had
fished up the last one he was heard to
shout:
Every burned one of 'em has got a hole
in it half as big as my fist. and IN villain
if don't carry this case clear to the Su
preme Court. "-Detroit Free Press.
PERILoUs WoRK.-There we're three or
four of us Michiganders at the same hotel
in Montgomery. anG all were amazed al
the sight OF so many colored men loafiGg
their time away On the street. The man
from Iona county finally thought he'I
make few inquiries, and reckoning to
stalwart black, who had spent the last two
hours on the curb stone, he asked:
''Haye you any work to do?"
mot Jist now, san"
"Have you ever tried farming?"
sob, yes"
"And how did you come out?"
s'Mighty slim, sab. De white folks down
heah doan' encourage de black folks tall"
"How's that?''
'.Wall, in de fust place dar's de rent of
de land. Dey might jist as well frow off
de rent, but they won't do it. Den if git
de land an sot out to boiry mule nobody
will lend me one.''
s'Suppose you had a mule?1
'sDen whar would l borry plow? Can't
raise crops unless ye pillow. Den when
got de pillow an went ober to Kurnel
Whites to borry harness de Kurnel
wouldn't be at home, OF he'd be usin' all
de straps he bad"
Couldn't you make it go If you had
land, seed, mule. plow, and harness" ask
ed the Wolvering.
81 reckon might, but dunno. 'Spo-
: sin de mule expired or de harness broke or
some niger stole my plow?''
That's So"
IAN de ole woman might die. or one of
de chill'en git snake bit, or 1t might rain
10 weeks widout break. Tell you what
boss, you men from the Nor'f think it
looks hard to see SO many of US lying
round de towns widout work, but you
doan' know muffin bout de perils of gittin
right down to hard work and taken all de
chtnces. My ole woman says it seems like
hyin' in de face of de l. 'vd. an | reckon
she's mighty k'ercs. Standby School Ga
sette.
When man tells lie and sees it is
readily believe. just freaks his heart
to think he didn't make it a littla stro.g.
Or. q