davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
Social Pests.

We have no federation for whining and
we have no pity for. winners. They are
among the most ~tormenting of social
pests. Affected sensibility is disgusting,
morbid sensibility is vexatious but
worst of all is the drawing dolefulness
with which certain sel~f-consecrated
martyrs persecute any acquaintance who
has patience and good nature enough to
listen to them. It is the nearer who is
truly the great sufferer. These talkative
afflicted ones have no mercy, no compass
sion; without consideration or remorse,
they continue to the extremity of endur-
ance their slow, wasting torture, and
care nothing for their victims pain; are
not sensible to his mute anguish; give no
heed to his imploring looks, and no hear
ing to his stifed groans. We once
heard a clergyman preach upon the duty
of people bearing each others burdens.
We told him after service that it would
be as well to preach another sermon on
the duty of people bearing their own
burdens.
In this matter of bearing burdens
their is seldom any reciprocity. The
bearing is usually all on one side, and the
supply of burdens all on the other. One
person furnishes the load, and another
person has to carry it. Such persons are
entirely opposite in character and class.
The martyr side or ethics, as the most
repugnant to instinct, is naturally the
side which moralists the most strenu-
ousIy urge; but needful in general as
this is, the urgency may be excessive
and unreasonable. The constant exhor-
tation is, Scare nothing for self; care
everything for Others" Think and work
for the comfort and happiness of your
brethren; but as to your own lot, be con-
tent, even joyful, with suffering and sac.
rifce.-Henry GILES.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
GIadstOne's

Mr.. Gladstone is o man who, having
once put his hand to the pillow, not
only will not look back, but frequently
disdains to glance to the right or left
also. Although one Of the greatest men
this country has ever Produced
financier of consummate ability, a states
nan of rare parts, anda patriot of I'M
blemished removable somehow lacks
that genial sdvoir faire which drew all
men to such leaders as Lord B~eaconsfield
and Lord Palmerston. AS a lively French
friend of mine remarked, ST can not
understand your Mr.. Gladstone; he is SO
terribly in earnest" The Premier's ends
are always good ends, but he is 80 "ter-
ribly in earnest" about reaching his
objects that he is apt to overlook not SO
much the principal ean Of obtaining
them as the small details, which, though
individually insignificant, are frequently
collectively Of the utmost assistance to
statesmen and statecraft.
Mr.. Gladstone belongs to the Church
of England, and is fond of q fine ritual;
but there is a good deal of the old austere
Puritan spirit in his composition. Unlike
Palmerston, I doubt IL he ever made a
political convert from the enemies ranks,
and is inclined to despise those small
social amenities outside the walls of st.
Stephens which so often facilitate bust
ness within.-London Correspondence
Philadelphia Telegraph
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
THE MARKETS

.s C NC as,s 115Se. FIogR-ESPPsy,,
No. 2 mixed, so%@s1c. ear corn, soc. on track;
No. 2 white, $50. Oats-No. 2 white, 54g5412c.;
No. On ? %ia se Sc; Rys.NSSi ?. n sic; +, BsT de ISIS
81 II. FRUIT AND TEeETABLEs-APples, 50 OOs
Potatoes-Early Rose, from store, 81 25 per bush.
burbanks, 81 3d. peachblows,. 81 90; new potatoes,
Early Rose, Sc 5o@7 90 per brl. Cueumbers, IL 90
per doZ. Tomatoes-Burmuda, 81 90 per peck.
NEW YORK.-Cotton, u 1-16@12 5-16c. Flour
Common to good extra Western and State, 81 90
90 40; patent process, 81 5000 90. Wheat-Mo,2
/ 49, for old; mixed winter red, 81 "a. Corn
white, sfXgS2c.; mixed Western, 6o@6Sc.' Mess
f1.5oc.
Observation-Disclosures to choice Western
spring wheats, 81 5o@6 rs. Wheat-No. 2 Chicago
Ill. Corn No. 2 mixed, regular, SOC. fresh,
71s4c: Oats-No.2 mixed, regular, 4TAc. Rye
y N0 o., ? s FIan ssl NNeSeSSsnta B11eley q ~ n 2 sP pdng,
Mess pork, 81 25917 so. Lard, 11.o74c. Whisky,
wheat-No.a red fall, 81 2s4aI ISL; No. 3 red
fall, 81 "a. Corn-No. 2 mixed, 71@72c. Oats-No.
2 mixed, 54c. Ba~rley-Medium to fancy spring,
I5c. gsi 90: Whisky, 81 IS. Mess pork, ST so.
BALTIMoRE.-Flour = Fancy, Sc 12k@7 25.
Wheat-No: 2 winter red, 81 3s91 $SA: Corn
western mixed, SlE29S2L2c. Oats-Wh1te West
ern, 65@6Sc.; mixed, 64@65c. Mess pork, ST. 70
@1S so.
LOUISVILLE Cotton Middling uplands,
114c. Wheat-No. 2 winter red, 81 80. Corn-No
2 white, s3h@s4c.; No. 2 4 mixed, soc. Oats-No. 2
white, 55@56c. Mess pork, SIS rs.
NEW Observation-Disclosures, IS 25
@5 so. Corn Mixed, s5c:; choice yellow, s5c.
choice white, 95c- Oats-Prime, 65c.
TOLEDO.-Wheat - No. 2 red Wabash, 81 80.
CornrHigh-mixed, 75c. Oats-No. 2 mixed, 50%c.
INDIANAPOLIS.-Wheat Firm at 81 3OL@
1 81. Confirm at 72H@73hc. Oats, 5O952c.
LIVE STOCK
CINCINNATI.-CATTLR Market quiet, with
little demand for inferior quality. Prices range as
follows: Common, So SOFAS rs; good to choice
butcher grades, SIS 5096 %; good to choice cows
and heifers, So 006J6 25; fair to good shippers,
SIS 25@6 so; common to fair oxen, So 00g4 so
stockers, S. 1904 so. Hoes Selected butchers
and heavy shippers, Sc 90@7 80; fair to good pack
ing, S. 4O@6 80; fair to good light, Sc 5o96 80
stock hogs, 81 50@5 25. STRENGTHENING lambs
Sc 25; clipped, 81 Dogs %; ewes, So 00G3 80
Spring lambs, SG10c. per lb.
cHICAGO-Cattle- Common to good shipping
steers, S. 1907 90; stockers and feeders, s. 25@
8 25. Hogs-Common to good mixed packing, Sc 81
/ @6 30; heavy, 81 0O97 40. Sheep-Prlme, Sc 70.
INDIANAPOLIS.-Hogs Heavy packing anC
shipping, Sc 90@7 %; light bacon hogs, Sc 25@6 so
Sheep-Common to choice, "a 5O@6 20.
EAST LIBERTY, Pa Hogs Philadelphia
81 25s7 40; Workers, So 5O@6 Is.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
FIFTY Thousand Congressmen.

The British Parliament, which legis-
lates for a much smaller territory b
that of some of our States, consists OF
between six hundred and seven hundred
If the United States had the
basis of territorial representation
House of Representatives would
have not less than so, 900 members. In
many respects this would be a very great
advantage. Fifty thousand Congressman
would mean the introduction of about
900, 600 bills every session, which
would be a magnificent thing for the
paper manufacturers and the printers.
Old rags would probably bring SO a
pound, paper mills would be started on
every other block, and printers would be
paid a thousand dollars for every one
thousand Gems" The Government
Printing Office at Washington would
have to be extended beyond the boun-
daries of the District of Columbia, over
half the State of Maryland. This would
mensely. Then the Capitol would have
to be built beyond the Potomac into Vir-
ginia, thereby helping scores and scores
Of industries and developing thousands
of marble quarries which are now idle
and unproductiye. But these are not
the only benefits that would follow the
enlargement of Congress. As five mem
bers are on an average sufficient to run
a frst-class saloon, there would be room
for ten thousand additional establish
ments of this kind in Washington. The
only interest that we can think of that
the addition would not help is religion.
It would be entirely unnecessary to en-
large the churches.
But these advantages are purely local
and should not be taken into considera-
ton in deciding the question. There
are, however, controlling national reasons
in favor of the proposition, of which we
should not lose sight. If Congress con-
sisted of so, 600 members, every member
would, of course, insist upon the right
of enlightening his colleagues and con-
stituents on every question that might
arise. Fifty thousand speeches would,
of course, render the passage of more
than one o. two bills in a session impos-
sible. This would be SO great a stepin
the line of good government that we are
certain the people would cheerfully make
any sacrifice in order to accomplish it.
Indeed, the chances are that before mem
bers had finished introducing bills the
session would have expired and a fresh
1000 M. C.'s would be swooping down
on the District. Another troublesome
question which the enlargement would
settle is the disposition of the surplus
evenue. The salaries alone of a Con.
gress on the scale suggested would be
about $3.50, 000,0 600 a year. As they are
bound to have this money in some form
or another, the best thing to do is to lei
them draw it out in a lawful way. A
thousand congressman would be entirely
too small for this great country.-Neu
York Herald.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
P~ropagating Plants

The propagation of plants by cutting
is not q difficult operation; yet it would
seem that horticulturists have taken
especial pains to obstruct the operation
with so many difficult conditions that
amateurs have been discouraged from
undertaking this delightful and salts
factory employment. To be successful
it is absolutely necessary that the plant
from which the cutting or "slip" is
obtained should be in perfect health.
If this is weak or diseased, failure will
be the result. An excellent method to
prove the proper condition of the plant
from which we wish to root cuttings, is
to note if the slip breaks or snaps clean
off, instead of bending Oh kneeing. If
it SNAPS clearly off it is in the right state
to root freely should it bend and not
break it is too old, when if it roots at all
it will be slowly and make but a sickly
plant. With but few exceptions, cut
tings of all kinds root freely from slips
taken from young wood before it be-
comes hardened. The practice of cut
ting at or below a joint, which has been
generally considered practicable, has
been the cause of numerous failures,
from the fact that when a slip is cut at a
joint, the shoot has frequently grown too
hard at that point, while half an inch
higher up or above the joint, the best
condition will be discovered.
1t is wisest to pot off cuttings as soon
as rooted, even if the roots are very
small. Half an inch is the best length
for them to be ; they will spindle and
become weakly if left longer, and when
once in the pot will not flourish as well.
The soil should be finely sifted and the
pots about two inches wide and in depth.
After potting, place on boards OK
benches covered with an inch of sand,
sprinkle freely with a fine watering pot,
and shade four or fine days. By that
time they will begin to root, when no
further shading is necessary.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
Different Modes Of Taking an Oath.

The followers of certain creeds object
from conscientious scruples to the usual
verbal oath, holding that it is impious to
take words of such awful sanctity upon
the lips in connection with secular mat
tiers. These-notably the Quakers-
make q simple affirmation, non the less
binding in law, though il is said land
one can we'll believe) that no conviction
of perjury upon an affirmation has yet
been known. Jews are sworn upon the
Old Testament, Mahometans upon the
Koran, and we occasionally witness a
curious scene in our law courts when
special and exceptional form of oath is
rendered necessary by the nationality OF
the witness-as, for example, when q
Chinaman breaks a saucer, or q disciple
of Zoraster gives his replies with his
hand uplifted over q torch. 1t may be
noted, however, that in China there are
several forms of attestation in vogue, ac-
cording to the rank and numerical dig
nifty of him who swears ; while in Japan
oaths are taken vicariously by the BONES
O priests, who are paid for doing so ac-
cording to q fixed tariff, which is regu-
lated correspondingly to the vehemence
or importance of the vow. Mahometans,
too, swear by other things than the
Koran, all more or less holy in their
faith-by the Prophet and his beard, by
the boards of their fathers and grand
fathers, and their own, and by the horses
descended from the Prophets fayorite
steeds. The Koran itself abounds with
cautions against false or trivial swearing,
and inculcates strongly the sacredness Of
an oath. In French courts of justice
the witness raises his hand to heaven
while making his avowal. This seems
to be one of the earliest, if not the orig
inal ceremony; there is something
for we practice it almost unconsciously
when we make a solemn assertion under
the influence of strong emotion. Its sig
n~ifcance is easily recognized. The Ap-
awhai and other Indians on the Isthmus
in swearing; Kaffirs are said, by early
African travellers, to swear by two peeled
sticks placed crosswise-from which it Is
ancient tradition of the Catholic religion,
and the remnant of Obeah or fetch
worshipers, which still fingers in some
parts OF Jamaica and a few other Wes
India Islands, trace circles on the ground
with the finger smeared in their OWL
blood, in token of the CHASTITY obliga-
tions imposed upon them. There can be
no doubt the oaths of many secret soci
ties at the present day must be 81 con
stituted that their periurer would wreal
his own destruction, since they are Sc
faithfully observed.-London Globe.
IT Is the easiest business in the world
to do a thing. The learning how il
where the labor is.-Lanlpton.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
The Electric Boy.

The Australian boy has arrived from
Melbourne. When eight years old he
gave evidence of wonderful electric
power that has kept developing since.
The only food for which he cares is that
which contains phosphorus. When not
sufficiently charged with magnetism he
complains of and headache.
When he goes to sleep the supply of
electricity becomes slightly diminished,
but is much more constant than during
his waking hours. He is now twenty
two years old, he stands upon a mat
ting made of cocoanut threads, and al
lows the curious to examine his clothing
in order to convince them that no cleo
trical apparatus is concealed about his
person. When he touches any one a
current of electricity goes from him into
the other, producing the sensation that
arises from contact with o galvantic bat
terry. He told a reporter that he was al
ways charged in the morning, but that
during the day he gave off so much
power that it left him completely ex-
hausted in the evening.-NeW York Let
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
lChicago Times.]
"COOL" BURGESS.
THE MANo Of MANY LAUGHS.
A SANITY stump speech by a SANITY
sinner.

The name of the gentleman heading
this article needs no Introductory re-
marks from the writer. Everybody
knows who "Cool" Burgess is, and what
he is; everybody who is anybody has
seen and laughed at his grotesque per-
formances, and enjoyed them in such a
manner as to neverforgetthem. Goods"
laugh is contagious and hilarious, and,
like the cut of his unmentionables, is
unlike anything on or off the boards. His
oratorical powers are certainly unequaled,
and, as he says himself without egotism,
he "don't believe that My Lord Roscoe,
with all his boosted powers as an orator,
could deliver my stump speech as I do"
We coincide in the opinion ourselves.
Mr.. Burgess tells a heap of truth under
the guise of burlesque in his roaring and
amusing stump speech. His hit at the
navy is a pretty good thing ; when he
straightens himself up and seriously says
that "we have as much water as ever"
and then, "but where, oh where are
our ships ?" the laugh that follows is a
pretty good indication the point is well
taken. Nor is it with water alone that
MI. Burgess deals in his oratory; that
gentleman tells some remarkable truths
about oil-one Oil in particular, and that
is st. Jacobs Oil, the Great German
Remedy for rheumatism. We doubt if
he receives a more hearty laugh at any
time during his performance-and he
receives many such-than when he tells
everyone to use st. Jacobs Oil, the Great
German Remedy. Mr.. Burgess very
earnestly recommends it as the great
panacea, and to show his esteem of the
Oil produces o bottle from the capacious
pocket of his ulster to show that he
knows what he is talking about.
This part of Mr.. Burgess performance
struck the writer as very laughable, and
he called on MI. Burgess to ask him how
he came to introduce the Oil in his
speech. In reply to his interrogatories
Mr.. Burgess said:
81 look upon the stage, my dear sir,
as a can of educating the people, and
human nature is such that truth told in
the guise of humor will be remembered
longer than the plain, unvarnished ar
ticle. Every word I say regarding the
wonderful merits of st. Jacobs Oil I
mean. I am the greatest admirer of that
wonderful medicine there is in the pro-
f~ession, and there is not an actor in the
country who will not speak in praise of
the Great German Remedy. The bottle
which is produced by me OF the stage is
no prop BOTTLE but the genuine article,
as I never travel without st. Jacobs Oil.
1t has cured me of the rheumatism when
I was so bad with that aggravating dis
ease as to have to give up my business.
It cured me permanently, too, and I am
so thankful for being cured that I praise
it continually. 1t cured my wife, also,
of the same disease, and I know a score
of performers who have been cured by
1T. In fact, no performer of good sense
travels without that medicine. You know
rheumatism is their special dread; sooner
or later it ome to them all, owing to
their mode of living and travelling"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
Mental Vassalage.

The attempt in England to impose
sivil disabilities upon a man because OF
his religious belief, as in the Bradlaugh
,ase, will bear its fruits. Sensible and
just people will see the folly and the
wickedness of the stab at the liberty of
thought. Gladstone believes in the
Christian God. Bradlaugh does not be-
lieve in any God. No one objects to
Gladstone for his belief, to the extent of
trying to handicap him in political &C
hon. No one has a right to do SO. Any
one with a spirit above a beast, willingly
lccords him his religious opinions. Then
why not extend the same generosity to
Bradlaugh? He is a man of liberal
mind, and 80 far as we know, he has al
ways plead for the advancement of his
people. He has not been trucking to
power. He has not been a slave to the
opinion of others. He has often and al
ways spoken for the weak and plead the
cause of the poor. But prejudice, in
trenched behind public opinion, has
ostracised him and driven him out of Of
ice, or refused him a seat in Parliament,
because he did not believe in the God
that body. In England it appears that
t11O RCORAO dIO A1Ol6 RcucIOu5 bIldu uC1
representatives. No sooner is Mr. Brad
laugh rejected by the House of Com
mons. than his constituents honor him by
returning him to Parliament. There will
never be any real honesty in politics OF
in religion until men and can
think and speak freely. The politician
is still in bondage. Where is the one
who dares to be exactly what he is ?
Where is the one who is not in subiec-
tion to some ociety-some secular or re-
ligious society? Here are o few words
from Colonel Ingersoll, which may be
worth considering. He says: 81 would
like to Eberate the politicians. At pres
emit the successful office-seeker Is a good
deal like the center of the earth; he
weighs nothing himself, but draws
everything else to him. There are so
many societies, SO many churches, so
many isms, that it is almost impossible fol-
an independentman to succeed in a polit-
ical career. Candidates are forced to
pretend that they are Catholics with
Protestant proclivities, OF Christians with
liberal tendencies, or temperance men
who now and then take a glass of wine,
or, that although not members of any
church, their wives are, and that they
subscribe literally to all. Inc result o.
all this is that we reward hypocrisy and
elect men entirely destitute of any real
principle; and this will never change I'M
til the people become grand enough to
allow, each other to do their own think
ing" A man ought to be the master o.
the institutions which he has created.
He ought to stand above them. No mar
ought to be either a physical slave or &
mental serf. This world will not bt
much of a paradise SO long as the indi
viduals in it are willing ODE the servant.
to fear and prejudices. The religious
world and the political world will botf
be improved when thought Is unclaimed
and when every idea can be honestly ant
fearlessly expressed everywhere. Fetter1
should be broken from the mind, ant
mental vassalage of every kind SHOULD
come to an end.-IndianapoHs Herald
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13

William J. ~Coughlin, of somerville, Mass, says: .Tn
the fall Of 1876 I was taken with ~bleedings of the lungs,
followed by a severe cough. I lost my appetite and
nesh, and was confined to my bed. In 1877 I was ad-
mitted to the hospital. The doctors said I had a hole in
my lung as big as half a dollar. Al one time a repor
went around that I was dead. I gave up hope, but q
friend told me of De-. WILLIAM HALL's BALsAM FOR THE
LUNGS. I got a bottle, when, to my surprise, I COM
menced to feel better, and to-day I feel better than for
three years past. I write this hoping every one afflicted
with diseased lungs will take De. WILLIAM HALLhs BAL
SAM, and be convinced that CONSUMPTION CAN BE CURED.
1 can positively say il has done more good than all tn
other medicines I have taken since my sickness"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
A Bridal

A gorgeous bridal chamber has been
completed for the reception of a bride
who has never known the want OF
money, and by whom 500 is spent with
as little thought as many people would
tender a 10-cent piece. The walls r
covered with heavy white satin, tufted
with gold buttons, and mirrors are in
terjected here and there. The ceiling is
painted in the m~ost-artistic manner, and
the curtains are of white silk, embroid-
cred in gold and rich colorings in floral
designs. These curtains are mounted
on gilt poles, and, when drawn back,
disclose lace drop curtains that cost 5000
a window. The portieres are of white
silk plush, with dado embroidery match
ing the curtains. The furniture is treat
ed with the same material as the cur
tains, and what little of the framework
is seer is found to be heavily gilded. A
table cover in white silk plush shows
gold embroidery, and is bordered with
rich gold bullion fringe, with point d
spange heading. The fringe is seven
inches deep.-Brook{yn Eagle.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13

GENIUS is infinitely more than talent.
Talent labors, studies, combines, SO its
products r combinations and the Joints
and crevices show more or less. Genius
creates separate, indivisible units. Tai
emit initiates, improves, completes, it can
only initiate nature to a certain extent.
Genius initiates not ; like the silk-worm
it brings forth the finest tissues from its
own body. Talent may be inherited ;
genius is communicated from on high
Rabbi Wise.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13

THERE are four kinds of men who lose
time-the man who is always waiting at
the street corners trying to persuade his
little dog to catch up to him /; the man
who spends four or five hours a day try
ing to color a bogus meerschaum pipe ;
the man who is generally explaining to
his friends how and under what circum-
stances he wa presented with his ex-
pensive cane, and the man who, having
pretty hair, wishes to keep the part ir
exact shape and appearance.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-04-13
Railroader.' Relief

That most comfortable Ticket Office,
1877 West Street, New York, is presided
over by Mr.. G. V. V. Ward, who thus
addressed n Of our representatives
recently: "Some months ago I had
rheumatism in my right arm, and was
unable to raise it. I was advised by a
friend to use st. Jacobs Oil. I did SO,
and before the second bottle had been
exhausted my arm was perfectly we'll"
Brooklyn Eagle,