The Osceola times., 1882-11-11
SEAS0NABLE DOTS

NOW IDat OyHlcTS are III hedsOli We
will begin to SANDER church festival
soup.
1t is exceedingly queer that the fast
color is the one that is slowest to come
out.
1t is usually the case that a person is
suspicious of what he cannot compre-
hend.
The only thing strong enough to with
stand hunk of limberger cheese is its
own smell.
A man of brass will often make him
self felt As general rule he makes
other people blank it!
The man who always has a political
AK to grind, is too eternally lazy to Use it
after it is sharpened.
The hay fever is now rapidly going TO
seed. It's afflicted possessor wishes 1T
would 60 to the deuce.
Virtue has it's reward. provided it isn't
politician. The reward in politics
usually belong to the biggest thief.
Perhaps why women never like to 90
fishing is because the fish are not alto
gether satisfactory as conversationalists.
The reason for the great number of
marriages near the holidays must be on
account of the cold weather about that
time.
The reason why an ox-wagon, used
for the purpose of cheap emigration, is
called prairie schooner is because it is
steered.
In explaining the matter of his having
a swelled eye, Bixingby said he had a
tilt with Texas cockroach, and the
roach took the chrome.
The oyster bed is not an automatic
folder. The oyster himself is folder.
At least that is apt to be the opinion of
the man who gets his finger caught.
There is nothing like keeping glory in
reach. 1t doesn't begin to take so much
red tape for man to become candidate
as it does for him to cast his vote
The parrot and the sewing bee ought
never to be held accountable for what
they say. Ifthey weren't talking they
would probably be doing something
worse.
When a medical student tells about
his slicing up forty dollar corpse every
morning by way of diversion, il is safe
to suspect something like a big stiff.
In these days when a man sets anoth-
er mans house on fire to get even with
him out of spite, he seldom gets the
better of anybody but the insurance COM
panies.
The Burlington Hawkeye is of the
opinion that there is remarkable SINH
larity between the Independent Democrat
or Republican and a Bob Ingersol Pres
byterian.
There is no use in trying to make out
that nature sets moral example when
the mosquito, seeking whom he may
devour, prowls about the whole night.
Bixingby the younger, thinks the
prodigal's father needn't nave been so
stingy and that if he had had any style
about him he might have killed the fat
ted COW.
As between the boafd and barbed wire
fence, man is always able to appreciate
the points of difference after he has
tried TO climb over, and sat down on a
few of them.
"The least one can do for the dead"
says the N. o. Picayune, sis to circulate a
subscription for a monument" Mr.. Plea
yune probably considers this less than
nothing. -
How thirty-fve-dollar-a.mo month clerk
can 60 off every summer on thirty-five-
dollar-a-week vacation, is ceasing to be o
mystery. 1t is done by the simple twist
of the wrist.
A minister is shocked and Mortified al
the idea of going to a circus and. yet the
church oyster soup festival sWindline
and the disreputable swing society are
both encouraged.
Old Father Time is represented as an
ancient, bald-headed, wrinkled, toothless
old man. Grandfather Eternity must be
a sorry looking mummy. He has not
been satisfactorily depicted.