South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1882-01-20


ter. They ere just invaluable to me-
i am glad TO hear it, Tom yes, sir;
for when l have been out all day, bard
Mt work, and come home very tired, and
take Up one OF your novels, I'm asleep
directly
COULDN'T Play Boy citizen who
has an Office in the top story of Il block
on Grisvold street had hail q ton OF coal
dumped on The walk the other day, and
the cart hadn't yet disappeared when q
hoy came pulling up stairs and called
out:
Say, want that coal lugged up p
That's no way TO address a person,
replied the man. why don't you ad-
dress me in civil, polite manner p
Dtano how. answered the boy
Well, FL chow you. Sit down here
and suppose you are the owner of the
Office, and am a boy who wants to
bring up your coal
lie stepped into the hall and knocked
On the door, and as The boy cried come
in the man entered the room with his
hat in his hand and began:
Beg pardon, sir, but You have some
coal on the walk below
Yes
shall | bring it up for you p
oh, certainly
How much will you paw ?
Well replied she boy as he looked
around ct tho scanty furniture, i gen
orally promise g boy fifteen cents and
shove a bogus quarter on him, but see
log it's you
Boy, what do you mean p demanded
the man, as he flashed up.
But The boy lodged him and reached
the stairs. and as lie paused at ono of
the landings to look up he called out:
J expected every minute that You'd
advise me to get that coal upstairs be-
fore some creditor gobbled it. You
can't play boy for shucks.'
priest once CHANGED to hear, unper
celyed, fierce verbal onslaught by one
market woman on another, in the course
Of which every effort of rhetoric was
made to provoke retaliation, but with
on. effect. Go on, so on, at last said
the matron attacked; sc know I'll not
answer We, because I've been to confess
sion this morning and I'm in q state Of
grace. But wait till get out oft
An Inbred traveller overtaking an
aged minister whose horse was much f.
jguo1, said enecringly; "A nice horse
yours, doctor very valuable beast that
but what makes him wag his tail so,
doctorT Why, as you asked me will
tell You said The clergyman. 1T IL
for the same reason that your tongue
wngs so-o sort Of natural weakness.
When Luoy's father thought that Lu.
cy was talking too much, he said:
why do you lc. your tongue run all
the time z
'Tauso I've dot so many good sngs
to say was the bright reply.
A minister preached an hour; then
he remarked Another wide field open.
FROM tho subject il anolher direction.
Just then an old colorcd saint eIacula-
'oa' Please Lord, shut up the bars
I've been to so3 Mrs. TtEcta.lle.'
said Mrs. TciIta,c and tho way she ron
ON about YOU was perfectly soandalous.'
50 shes been talking about me has
che . asked Mrs. Brown, quietly.
Yes, indeed, she has, replied Mrs
Tellialc, with emphasis.
What q good time you Two must have
bad, said Mrs. Brous, With O. pleasan.
cour.eEance.
IYNDALLs theory that heat 10 simply
motion IN another form, must be- true
Strike q piece Of iron and it become,
hot, Strike a man and he Immediately
boils over There is, however, one OK
ccpton TO The rule. Strike warm
friend for short loan and he 40 once
becomes rs cod as an icobcrc-Pbila-
delphia Mars