The Dallas weekly herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1885, 1882-04-06
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capital Of the 'bifRest province out W
doors" II Is called the handsomea city In
Texas, but the want Of shade In the streets,
the glarng yellow Of the limestone blocks
and the yellowish plaster clay Of the soil do
not agreeably meet the travellers cxpcotn.
ton. A glaring oChre tint aud oriental
bleakness of sunshine, u want OF shady
sidewalk at most times, and great breadlh
of bake-oven In midwinter, when undertake
ing to cross the wide streets, modihes our
appreciation of the pleasingly broken land
sCapes and noble, ascending grade OF tne
main street, from the Colorado bridge TO
the ruined walls Of the capitol building
where the ordinance of secession was passed
that foolish ordinance on which is bullt
the present sullen and stupid regime OF
Texas politics, with a tire9ome old gov
ernor named Roberts, the wisest owl
among the moss-baeks of the south, too con-
ceited to learn anything, too simple 10 I'M
deceive the credulous farm people, TOO
wrong in the past to be frank and get right.
He presided over the secession convention;
that is his miserable title to gratitude
and immortality. He lives in an old
lead-colored executive mansion sldeWlse
to the capitol upon the grade OF hill,
house with an entablature OF nuted
columns and balcony under it, and there
once lived Sam Houston, ruler he
and his school persistently fought in vain,
and, unable to beat him, finally deposcd
lim and now resent his fame, which they
tediously attempt to explain away. III Is
said that Roberts expects to be sent 10 the
United States senate in place OF Coke.
Coke is mineral out of which some OF the
gas and moisture have been baked. ROBERTS
is replete with all the original gas ana
yerdancy. He bears the same relation to
a great province like Texas that bigoted
lfohammedan Tartar chief bears to the
great plains of Asia in the nineteenth CEN
fury. Let me reveal him to the outer
world.
ROBERTS,
lean, simple, wiseish, skipny-iaceu oIa
man of sixty odd, with one tooth ever try
ing to make connection with Wagglng
undc~-lip, on which is a sheet of white
beard. He has pair of grayish eyes, full
of transparent light and self-appreciation,
reminding you, by their feeble confidence,
of Justice Shallow, when he says ~,
brother, you should have SCI: seen what Sir
John and | have seen. Ha! Sir John?"
They say Roberts was colonel IN the
war but there are no traces of it. glib
herring childhood seems to have settled upon
his scars, and as we bear his weak yet con.
fident congratulations, we are reminded OF
the lion lying down with the sheep, and
little child leading them. lnsenslbly we
think of weak cruel and catnip tea as the
lie has written book, like King James L.
his garrulous prototype. l will give you
the first sentences
"Nothing appears to me as being more
appropriate than an explanation OF how 1t
happened that |, small farmer, a lawyer
and a Judge most of the time, owning a res
idence for neatly forty years. IN texas,
a work while busily engaged in my ordl-
nary pursuits"
..This "work' he congratulates himself
upon is pamphlet of one hundred
and thirty-three pages, about as large
as the brief lawyer will write Ill
two nights, or equal to three or four
of my letters to the Enquirer in size. He
has officially approved of the purchase of
ninety copies Oft by one of the state nor
NAL schools, where it may safely be intro
duced as belonging to eunuch literature.
The life of Charles |. by Mr.: Dick in Cop
perfield" was virile matter in comparison.
THE FURTIvE-EYED GOVERNOR TALKED
to the following effect:
"Sam Houston? I'll give you my. idea
of. the man. He was an actor! sir:
That's tan actor, very great actor!
Now let me give you an instance OF 1t:
Down yer at St. Augusteen Sam
Houston made one of his speeches.
They used to follow him around to speak
against him-Wigfall and Oldham and sew
eral of 'em. Well, sir, Sam Houston he'd
make his speech first, with big flourish.
Then he'd get up and leave. He'd never
stop to hear any of 'em answer him. He
was Sam Houston! Yes, sir, he was great
actor.
well, sir, as l was goin' on to say, Sam
Houston got down to Augusteen. de
made his speech first. The people were all
hooray. Sam he acted as if there want no,
body but him to hear. When he'd
got done, he says to the people-mind
behind him-says Sam: 'Fellow-citizens,
there's little Teller yer by the name of
Wagtail'-no that wasn't 1t. Let me see.
o, yes-a little Teller by the name OF Wag-
gletaiI, that was Sam Houston's nickname
fur him. 'Feller.citize u.s. says he, there's
little Teller named Waggletail follern Of
of me around, and directly he get up and
tell YOU a whole parcel of lies There was
Wigfall, mind you and a great man he was,
too-a bigger man than sam Houston IN
the substantials. Sam could paint it up
and make it appear so, but on the substan-
tials Wigfall was a very great man.
am I?-Sam Houston he come down and
set by the tavern and began to whlttle
sticks, pretending not to hear word Wig
fall was a-saying; but he was hearin' every
word of it. ] told you he was great ac-
tor, didn't !? When Wigfall got through
Sam Houston sprung up from that cheer
and walked up the street amongst the
crowd, and says he, at the top OF
his voice 'Feller-t itizens, didn't l tell
We that Teller would tell ye a parcel OF
lies? Now we've heard 'em.' Well, you
can see the effect. Why, they jest howled
with admiration ofhim. o, he was great
actor 20 Here the governor OF Texas wiped
his beard, pushed up his slouched hat,
| looked down through his eYes-which were
along way beneath his eyebrows-room
enough between for another pair of eyes
and he shot pigeons as the phrase is, or
looked furtively here and there for another
beginning.
"Now I'll give you my idea Of
WHAT MADE SAM HOUSTON SUCCESS.
Am boring Of your Because if l am, III
90 away"
NO, governor, you are deeply inter
We'll, III give you my idea of Sam
/ Houston's power among the people. IL
was his way of never looking as II he'd been
put down. There. you've got my idea OF
Sam Houston. He'd cock up his head as II
he'd won a victofy, whether the argy-
ment had been Fagainst him or not.
He had lust that air about him. Up THAR
at ST. Augusteen there was a heap Of
biz men. / came from Augusteen, and j
know about IT, lived years at Augusteen.
We had Harrison, you know. Harrison
was a big man. lie beat Sam Houston,
too. iii tell you where be beat him. An
/ citing tidiOus2 Because. you know, III
20 away i'll am Well, Pendexter Il am
not particular about all the governors
local names Of either people or towns came
| in yer 70 Texas with another man 8
wife-nOthin' uncommon that was IN
the plain, simp,e days OF early
Texas Pendexter's first vile followed him
up and sued him Tor bigamy. Sam HOus-
ton was her lawyer. Harrison was on Pen
dexter's side. Harrison was a big man.
On, be was a ratilin' man. He was heap
better than Sam Houston on the substan-
tIals Sam could paint il mp and make u
appear mighty fine. Harrison got he
Spanish laws Oh him. Pendexters hrst
f6arrispe uns By A Protestant preacher. Ia