The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1882-06-09
HUMORs OF THE DAY.

..Do YOU play poker. Mrs. Schenk'
Sohenkwales' head sometimes.
NEVER send present hoping for one
in return" Never. Get your present
first, always, and send yours when you
have time.
Is THE General on the retired list p
they asked of his wife the other evening.
Retired no, indeed I" she replied
"he's down to the club playing poker. !"
JONES accompanied by his dog Snap)
meets Brown, who accosts him with,
Good morning, Jones how's your dog
Snap?" Jones" Pretty well, thank
you; how are you ?"
IMAGINE the Indignation Of an Ameri.
can boy in o French school, who in q
history class is told how Lafayette, the
great French General, triumphed in the
revolution, assisted by Washington.
JUST taste that tea" said old Hyson
to his better half, at the supper table,
the other evening. Well, there doesn't
seem to be anything the matter with it.
can't taste anything" Neither can 1,
and that's what I'm growing at"
FIRST SwKLL-"I never did like
May not nearly so pretty as Mary
wonder they don't change the name Of
the month to Mary" Second Swell
"Clevaw ideaw, by Jove; make awys.
taws good to June, you know!"
MoDEsTY: do YOU pretend to have
as good judgment as 1 have 2" ex-
claimed All enrageds wife to her husband.
"Well, no." he replied slowly, "our
choice of partners for life shows that my
hr<I Ok - H.
yours."
A FRENcH officer said to Swiss COL
onel How is it that your countrymen
always fight for money, while we French
always fight for honor ?" The Swiss
shrugged his shoulders and replied :" 1
suppose 1t is because people are apt to
tight for that which they need most.
UNDERSTAND that Brown is in
trouble, said Smithson. Yes" replied
Fogg. "Brown was at the auction shop
the other day. They had silver pitcher,
and Brown offered to take it-offered to
take it for nothing, you know. Well,
the Sheriff took him up. That's all.
IT Is quite q proper idea for a young
lady to paint a bunch of pansies on a
fresh-laid egg and toward it by special
messenger to her best gentleman friend.
scheme against you. Come over the
garden wall this evening"" The inter
est now begins. s.-Net0 HaVep Register.
UNCLE NED lost dollar the other day,
and when he went home he called up his
eldest son. "Come heah, boy, and set
down. Dis am queer worP, anyway,
boy; jis' wen yo' think yo' am layin' on
feathers on walkin' on roses-slap an
dar yo' is, fiat in de mud, playin' tattoo
Wild yo' heels on mex to muffin. ."-On
City Derrick.
TERRIBLE fate of kind-hearted girl
According to a truthful Indian newspa-
per, a hungry lion invaded a young
ladies' seminary on commencement day,
and, bouncing in among them, carried
of the prettiest and plumpest, with her
composition in her pocket-a schoolgirl
essay on kindness to animals.
"How profoundly still and beautiful
is the night" she whispered, resting her
hneiy-veined temple against his coat
collar and fixing her dreamy eyes on the
far-off Pleiades, chow soothing, how
restful" Yes he replied, towing
with the golden aureola of her hair,
land what a night to shoot cats. -
Brooklyn Eagle
"LooK var, Glenn, don yo' be growlin'
bout de scaceness on dem var trousers
Dey's got as much war in 'em Wit as
dem sbanks o yo'n, eben eff yo' fader
did tram 'roun' in 'em mon forty year.
He didn't hab no sich a'rs He'd be-
pranein, srouut in iem yit. and be proud
6s.Er OBJ de- lz.ass,s eff DIR sr11z alsv Ca
sion for gearmints wfiar he's gone. -
Rome Sentinel