Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1882-09-21
Anmoruus 2epartment.
.FOOLING GINERAL SHERMAN"

About six miles out Of Savannah, came
across farmer who accepted plug OF tobac-
co and was ready to sit down on log and an
swer all questions. When I asked him about
Shernan's s approach, he burst into loud laugh
and slapped his leg and was so tickled that ne
did not calm down for two minutes.
Excuse me, stranger" " he fnlly said, but
whenever I think Of how / fooled Gineral
Sherman it tickles me all over"
.''Did you fool him?"
wall, rather reckon"
''How?"
''Wall, you see, that's my place up thar
on the rise When the war broke out was
the most cantankerous rebel you ever saw.
I swore I'd fight and fout and fit till we lick
ed the Yanks if it took a hundred years.
l reckon Gineral Sherman heard Of it,
probably he did,"
s'And after he took Atlanta he made up his
mind to gobble me. He knew I'D swore to
die before I'd surrender, and he come along
down from Atlanta with over 10000 men to
surround me. Mighty cute old man, that
Gineral Sherman! !''
eyes"
tWall, they got here one night about 10
O'Clock reckon that nigh on to 10000 OF
them surrounded my house up thar and call.
ed fur me to come out and surrender and end
the war;
"And of course I didn't! That's whar' the
fun comes in. I wasn't home at all, but was
down in Varginny with Lee. They entered
the house and sarched and sarched, and went
to the barn and called and called, and when
the old woman finally told 'em / wasn't al
home they was the maddest crowd you ever
sot eyes on. They had hoofed it all the way
from Atlanta to git their paws on me, and had
their long march for nothing! l expect Sher
man was ready to bust with madness, and
reckon he won't never quite furgive me. Ii
tickles the old woman worse than 1t t,ckles
me, and you'd better come up to the mouse
and hear her tell what them 10000 Yankees
said when when they got here and found me
gone "-Detroit Free Press
THE MINISTER CEASED TO WONDER.-Ap
ropos of the Egyptian trouble, we wish to re
late little story, the circumstances OF Whlci
occurred during our trip to the Holy Lane
several years or more ago.
He was devout Christian, and had made
the study of the Bible and a proper under
standing of the big book the highest aim II
life. -.
When he arrived at the Sea of Galilee hi
heart was filled with awe, and he felt enerVa
ted and cleansed by the thought that he wa
gazing on the very spot where his Saviour once
stood.
Approaching the bcatman, he addressed hin
in his choicest Arabic and with Bible and com
mentary in hand, awaited an answer.
s'Ah ! what 'smatter 'th yer? Why don''
YER talk United States ?" asked the man con
temptuously. He was a real live Yankee wh(
was picking up a living by ferrying tourist:
across the sea.
$50 this is the Sea of Galilee,'' devoutly
murmured the searcher after knowledge.
''Ya-a-S,h
'And this is where our Saviour walked up
on the waters ?"
Ya-a-s."
''How much will you charge to take me t(
the exact spot ?"
''Wa-al, you look like clergyman, an
wont charge you nothin."
The devout one boarded the boat, and al
last pointed out where the miracle is said tt
to have occurred. After gazing at the waters
and dividing his time between glances at his
books and devout calculations of satisfaction
the searcher signifed his willingness to return
''Charge you $20 to take you back" sal6
the speculative Yankee.
ssBut you said you would charge nothing.
ssNaw, didn't. Nothin' to bring you out
Twenty to git back
s'And do you charge every body 500 to tak'
them back 90 asked the. astonished searcher
'.Ya-a-s. That's about the fgger."
''Well, then," said the devout one, as M
went down into his clothes, ''no wonder ou
Saviour got out and walked. '-Ne,o York. DIS
patch.