South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1882-09-29
A WOMAN's sTRATAGEM.

Mary, your corn-bread is never
done; l wonder what is the reason
everybody else has things right aud
we always have things wrong?'
'Why, Joe. I'm sure the corn-bread
has never been in this state before
You see, the fire had u fit and could
not be made to burn this morning.
oh, yes, you are always ready with
an excuse. Now, there's Mrs. Smith;
her stove never has fits. And she al.
ways has the lightcst, sweetest bread.
and the incest cakes and preserves l
ever ate. | wish you'd take pattern
by her.
~ ell, am sure Joe, do my best,
and think / succeed oftener than |
fail. l wish could suit you always;
but that, | suppose, could hardly be
expected, and Mary gave weary
sigh
Mary Starr mad beer married for
about year, during which time she
had found housekeeping rather up hill
work. She was neat little body
and conscientiously did her very best
to please her husband; but he, what
ever might be the reason, was very
hard to be pleased with anything she
did. Perhaps, like the old soldier, III
one OF Dickens stories, he had vital
and constant sense that 'diciplincmust
be maintained At any rate, he ne.
YER allowed Mary to De pleased with
himself or any occasion ii he could
help it.
Mary was an amiable wife, and not
easily rritated, though TO tell the truth
there were times when her forbear-
ance was sorely tried. For Instance,
whenever she and Joe took tea out, or
went 10 Il party, or even TO church, he
seldomaiIowed the opportunity to pass
unembraced to animadvert on some
deiiclencyin the cookery, or manners,
or dress, on the part of his wife; and
that pro bono publico. For Instance,
ii would be:
Mrs. Jones, what splendid sponge
cake you make. Mary, take notice
how light this cake is. / wonder why
You can never have it so putty Or,
Mrs. Brown, you are certainly an a
deptat entertaining company. wish,
Mary, that YOU would try to steal Mrs.
Browns art Or, Mrs. Green, your
dress Is always most becoming. Your
taste Is exquisite. | don't see why it
is, Mary, that with all spend for you,
you never can reach the .je ne sails
| quoi' of Mrs Green
On these occasions Mary would
blush and bite her lip, but she was a
woman OF too much pride and good
sense to make display of her mort.
ticailon or chargrin and she was
really too good natured and Christian
to let it change her feelings toward
Joe, whom she knew to be after all
very fond OF her and very just man
at heart. After a while, too, seeing
that the fault was probably cnrable,
she belhought herself how she could
proceed i'll order to break him of his
most disagreeablc habit
Fortune favored her. One day n
lady, one Of her most valued friends
and best neigiibors, called to invite
Joe and Mary TO Il tea party at her
house.
1T will be a small affair." said she,
but very pleasant, [ think. You on
" arc wanted to make the circle of
harmony complete
We'll said Mary, Il will come, Mrs.
Vanc, on one condition.
Condition ! Has it come TO this.
;hat you must make conditions? Well,
my dear, make your demand
The condition is said Mary, that
You will allow nae to furnish all the
refreshmen;s.'
well, that is an odd idea. Mary,
my dear, | hope you dou't mean to
insiruate that ! am getting poor?'
NO, Hattie; thank fortune she has
showercd her favors on You quite Ii
berally. But | have notion for this.
which, if You please, / will not di-
vuIge; only let inc have my own
way this one time, just for the oddity
of tie thing
IT anybody but you, Mary, would
have made such a request OF me, /
certainly should have taken offenso.
Bot ! never could be angry with you :;
So if it will be any satisfaction to you
though for the life of me ! can't
Imagine what your drift is-Ill com.
ply with your condition. When may
expect my supplies?'
Let me see-to-morrow is my ball
ing day, and your tea party is not to
be before Thursday. We'll on Wed.
nesda" afternoon you shall be supplied
with bread, biscuit, cake and ali other
accessories; and mind. the only thing
allow You TO furnish is tue butter,
which / do not make
Very well. It's all settled then.
and will leave you. On the whole
this arrangement suits me; it relieves
me OF great responsibility, for your