The Sentinel. [volume] (Trenton, N.J.) 1880-1882, 1882-09-09
The Talk of Men and Women.

To two classes we pay court:
women snd the aged. But the SUPERB
ority of women is perpetuaiiy men
aced; they do not sit throned on In
firnities like the old; they are sultors
as well as sovereigns; their vanity is
engaged, their affections are too apt 70
follow: and hence much of the talk
between the sexes degenerates into
something unworthy of the name.
The desire to please, to shine with
particular engaging lustre, to draw
fascinating picture of oneself, banlshes
from conversation all that is sterling
and most of what is humorous. As
soon as a strong current of mutual
admiration begins to flow, the human
interest triumphs entirely over the
intellectual, and the commerce OF
words, consciously or not, becomes
secondary to the commencing OF eyes.
Each simply waits upon the other 10
be admired, and the talk dwindles
into piaitudinous piping. Coquetry
and faulty are thus the knell OF talk.
But even where this ridiculous danger
is avoided, and q man and woman
converse equally and honestly, some
thing in their nature or their educa-
ton falsifies the strain. An instinct
prompts them to agree; and where
that is impossible, to agree to differ.
Should they neglect the warning, at
the first suspicion of an argument
| they find themselves in different
hemispheres. About any point OF
business or conduct, any actual affair
demanding settlement, woman will
speak and listen, hear and answer
arguments, not only with natural
wisdom, but with candor and logical
honesty. But if the subject of debate
be something in the air, an abstrac-
ton, an excuse for talk, a logical Aunt
Sally, then may the male debater
instantly abandon hope; he may en-
be smiling, be angry, all shall avail
him nothing what the woman said
first, that (unless she has forgotten it,
she will repeat at the end. Hence, at
the very junctures when talk be
| between men grows brighter and
quicker and begins to promise to bear
fruit, talk between the sexes is
menaced with dissolution. The point
Of difference, the point of interest, j.
evaded by the brilliant woman, under
a shower Of irrevelant conversational
rockets; it is bridged by the discreet
woman with q rustic of silk, as she
passes smoothly forward to the nearest
point of safety. 1t cannot be dis.
cussed in its natural connection. Il
may be returned upon after circuit :;
and if propounded as problem, with
neither party committed to side, il
may then be gently, lightly, but, III
the end, thoroughly treated. This
sort OF prestidigitstion, juggling the
dangerous topic out of sight until IL
c!n be Teiotroduced with safety in an
altered shape. is a piece of tactics
among the true drawing.room queens.
The drawing-room is, indeed, an
artificial place; it is so by our choice
and for our sins; the subsection OF
women, the ideal imposed upon them
from the cradle and worn, like hair
shirt, with so much constancy; their
notherly, superior tenderness to mans
vanity and seIfim portance, their
managing arts-the arts of a civilized
slave among good-natured barbarians
all are painful ingredients, and all
help to falsify relat ons. It is not till
we get clear of that amusing, artificial
scene that genuine relations are
founded. or ideas honesty compared.
la the garden, on the road or the hill
side, or tete G-tete and apart rom ira.
teTruptions, occasions arise when we
may learn much from any single
woman and nowhere more often
than In married life. Marriage is one
long conversation, checkered by dis.
utes. The disputes are simply value
less; they but ingram the difference.
the heroic heart of woman prompts
her at once to nail her colors to the
mast. But in the intervals. almost
unconsciously, with no desire to shine.
the whole material of life Is turned
over and over, ideas are struck out
and shared, the two persons more and
more adapt their notions one to suit
the other, and in the process of time.
without sound OF trumpet, they con.
duct each other into new worlds Of
thought "