The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1882-07-08
HON HlSTORYIS WRITTEN.
Texas SiftingS.l

ever since there were any facts, and
perhaps even before that time. Sir
Walter Raleigh, who was a great dis.
coVerer, also made this discovery. He
made 1t while he was in the Tower of
London. His other discoveries were
made during his tour around the world.
!, While Raleigh was In the Tower. be-
fore he was behearded, he was treated
with great kindness. lie was even nj.
lowed to read the daily papers, which
ut that time, had not yet begun to exist,
lie was also allowed tho use of writing
material, and as he had some leisure
time on his hands, he undertook to
write correct history of tho world.
from the beginning up to the present
day, or rather up to Raliegh's present
day.
one morning, after he had read tho
daily papers, which were not yet pub,
lished for u century or so, Sir Walter
happened to be standing at his window
which overlooked the courtyard,
when he saw II digraceiul quarrel in
the Senate. so to speak. Two of tho
employees of the Tower, after hurting
the most vile epithets at each other,
finally clinched, and had regular Joint
discussion. Finally the sergennt.nt-
arms succeeded in przing open the
jaws of kelly, Of Pennsylvania, there
by releasing the nose Of White of Ken
lucky, who was busy trying to insert
his thumbs in tho eye of his opponent
on the floor. Order was finally restor-
ed and after mutual apologies and OK
plantations the matter was amicably ar
ranged without detriment to tho honor
OF either gentleman. Next morning,
when Sir Walter got his morning pn-
per, he found that the newspaper ac-
count Of tho frncas was totally different
from what he, himself, had seen. Tho
reporter, who was also present during
the debate, got Whites nose between
kcl'y's teeth, and put the thumbs of
White, the gentleman from Kentucky,
in tho eye of Pcnnsylvania's iavorite
son, when in truth the thumb was not
inserted ut all, but it merely played
around on the outside, and hence, ac-
corhinG to tho code recognized by all
gentlemen, it was no congo, at all, but
merely an attempt MT gouging.
Sir Walter had hardly finished read.
ing this erroneous newspaper account
OF the affair, when the Governor of the
HoWrr entered tho room for a social
chat. fiatcfgh called his attention to
the infstatcmcnts in tho newspaper,
ana proceeded to give his version OF it,
when he was interrupted by tho Cover
nor, who WAS also an eye. witness, who
maintained that each gentleman had
the others nose between his teeth.
This seemed improbable, but the Gov
"rnor OF the Tower was positive about
it. lie also implicated John Sherman
and Coke, OF Texas, as having been
connected with tho fight, which did
not agree with either tho newspaper
version Of the affair, or with Ralcigh's
own opinion.
After the Governor had retired, Sir
Walter went to his desk, and talk ing ont
roll Of manuscript as big as u stovo
pipe, r'a"eh II carefully in the stove,
which, by ID" way, bad not y"t been in
N'uA''i, l'fh'Ni iN'Ilp tIitl II ilItttSt-WIl-
ncs5"a told such different accounts of an
affair that happened only the day
previous, thCrc was II chance Of there
being some slight inaccuracy in his cor
rect history of everything OF impor-
lance that happened for tho past five or
six thousand years. Tha,'5 what be-
came OF lialciGh's correct history OF tho
world In fact, II man who understands
the business, can sit down and writc as
correct n history Of the next thousand
years to com" "a he can OF the thousand
years that arc past and gone.
Senator Hampton, in his recent !cl-
ter declining to become . candidate for
Governor Of South Carolina says: ain
the present condition Of races and par
tics in the state, an Independent IS, If
pOssihfc, woisC than Il radical, for nc is
an enemy who ssteals the livery of
heaven 80 serve the devil in In the
great fight we are making to preserve