Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1882-11-24
sponoc. but prlldently awaited dcvel

| Nov iiiHE me the Ufllbftlid.
sail Mr. Spnop"ndyk". preparing
himself for the closing triumph
" BRING HE forth the frey. nntamed
mnhrr!.a" and as Mrs. Spooprndvk,
handed il to li,n. he raised it. picked
mp his key and approached the stream
The umbrella protected him from the
down p5Hr bat as he bent over tc
turn thn water off. the kissing shaft
struck under the ginyham. and rails
ing the umbrella with a vicious Jerk.
tipped Mr Spoupcndykc over Oh his
beam cnhS
"Dol CAST the mna,ly squirt" he
yelled as soon as he recovered breath.
Nv hat did yr want to distract my at
trntion for" and he shook the nm
brrlla at his wife as he arose drip
ping tn his feet. Another time
when I'm fixing this fountain you
get under the bed, ye hear, and Mr.
Spoopendyke Siarrl around him and
approached the enemy once more.
This time he held the umbrella
straight ont hafora him, grouping
along behind it with the key. He
had almost reached the rod when the
stream struck the outside Of the UNI
hrrlla. and as il whirlcd. Mr. Spoo
prnlykr spun around. landing i'll a
sitting position on the fountain. which
lifted him about a foot and rolled
him i'll the gutter.
"That's what yr were waiting to
see. WA, ii ," he shouted. aS he
climbed to his feet and shook his fist
at his trembling wife. Been roosl
Ing up there to watch this display of
genius against brute force, Got an
idea hid away somewhere that this
fountain and inr amt on friendly
terms" ani he whangod the UNI
brelia arrnss the steadily pouring
stream. got caught once more and
landr in the gutter again. this time
on thu back of his neck. How dye
like the show" he squealed. bound
ing to hi. feet. "Thcrc's going to be
a concert after the circusw and he
charged once again with his umbrel
la. which this time was jerkcd ont of
his hands and rolled over in the
NlIftt lO' otil tA nv vi tlit
ycntlcmanly u9hers.." and he grabbed
his weapon and made another on
slaught. Not that the circus per
fullnancr is concluded" he contin
urd. as he fell clear over the stream
and rolled into the umbrella. THE
best is vet to comr" and i'll trying to
: Sraiyhten the umbrella. which had
turned inside ont. he caught the foun
tain again and slid down on it to the
cnr5etonr, with a sound like Il bung
starter on Il barred.
My dear. why don't you ~ be
gan Mrs. Spoopcndyke.
Amt - roarrd the husband.
"P'hap- you know more about the
personal habits of this dod gasted
squirt than do" and he slammed
at il with his umbrella and kicked at
it until his leg was loose. Maybe
yoI'vr got som" political influence
here, and lowering his head behind
the umbrella h" charged again. The
water tipped the umbrella straight.
poured up into it and fell in ii del
nge OH Mr. Spoopcndykr's head and
shoulders. Don't be alarmed. la
dies he squealed. There's no dan
ger" and he smashed the umbrella
down over it. lik" an cxtinguisher.
A competent corps of dOd gasted
officials always on handr' but at this
iunctwr the umbrella ripped from
handle to whalebone tip, the stream
caught Mr.. Spoopendyke under the
chin and landed him pale and gas
ping against the fence
This is what | meant. dear" said
Mrs Spoop"ndyke. boldly approach
ing the fountain, kicking the nozzle
over and turning the water of. That's
what | wanted"
Il know what We wanted" yelled
Mr. Spooprndyke, fairly beside him
self with rage when he saw how easy
it was done. "Ir only want Il little
political influence and IA brick chin
ney to he ii Board of Water Commits
sioners" If | could kick like you.
Fit build wall around me. get into
a washtub and rent ont as Il respr
voir, If that's all We wanted, what
made We howl for Il fountain! If We
only wanted to kick it over. what
made We stand around and devil me
into hnlldlng that squirt Some day,
I'm goln to put meter IN You and
start Il private water tax and Mr.
Spoopendy ke wrenched off the hose
without waiting to nncouplr it. and
started for the housr
Are you wet, dear, asked Mrs.
Spoopendykr. regarding him atfec
tionatcly.
Wet" howlel Mr.. Spoopendyke
Man is four lifths water. and tn,
other fifth of me- is little moist
that's all and Mr.. Spoopendyk,
plunged upstairs and into bed.
| :" don't care" murmurcd Mrs
Spoopcndykc. He didn't stand still
long enough to get chilled. and if he
keeps mad for an hour longer ht
won't catch cold and. acting on
this new 'pathy. Mrs. Spoopendykt
busted herself at thr hrdsidc unit
her husband fell asleep from the OK
haustion of anger and snored tn,
snore of the just.
"a lCHMrr AND HIS CtRIous HERMIT
AGF Ira Tuwnsendthe old man h,
died in the "lmshousc on Tuesday
has been recognized rs the hermit OF
| Powtltnn, IL character we'll known il
West Philadelphia. His parent; live,
III Vermont. and were III comfortabl,
circumstances. Ira mad lived witt
his brother on u farm for many years
but Il quarrel grew between the tw,
concerning the division of the prop
erty.anl ai last Ira SAID To his brother
"Gou take the fariu and I'll go" II,
came To- this city about twenty tiy,
years ago. and dwrlt about Powclton
He was very poor. and took up hi.
abode in ;n old lime box. not NOR,
than eight feet s,!ilarr This hs
plac ii in Il ~mall stree, near Thirty
third and Arch streets In this boA
he at" anI slept i;v gardening foi
wealth! and charitable people III tn,
neighborhuud he earned enough t,
! r, l.,