The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1882-10-06
sms MEANT nusixEss.


Medicine Maa.
There is no reason Why the inventor
OF u remedy TO "cure the worst case ol
catarrh inside of five minutes" shonldn'I
feel It his duty TO place bottle Of ths
same ia everybody's hand-price, TWEEN
ty.6ve cents; "no cure no pay" There
flre the long-legged chap who pulled
the door boil on Lexington street the
other day, had none Of that timidity in
his hearing which eharacterizes rag buy
ers, iightening-rod men aud beggsr,
and truck pedlers. lie had good
thing. and he knew il. When the
door opened aud hard featured woman
about 10 years Of age. eonfroG;ed him
be pleasantly went u business and
asked;
MADAME, is your husband ever
Troubled with eatartLf'
"C4n man Hho has been dead 10,
seven years be troubled with catarhF
she firmly replied.
"Ba: thn children are liable TO be
attacked any hour this season." he re-
mat ked
Whose chiidi onf'
Yours, Madame"
"I never bad any, sir. Wha,
brought yOu here. anyws,i Why dc
you come asking these qusstionsf'
Madam. have compounded renl.
edy for the cA,auh. Il is . good
thing. I'll warrant it 10 knock any
case Of casarrh sky high Ia less than
i've p,iuutes."
swell, air, What i. all this to mef''
"Why, madAmo-why," he stam-
mered.
"DoI Iook a. though I needed any
caiarth remediesf' she demanded, M
shs stepped out on the platform.
Madame. | would not have YOU
think for the worII that | ,bougbt you
had the catarrh; but l suppose the fair
aud lovely can be attacked - well a.
the brave and strong"
"Ahd what have l got to do With al
that rigmarolel Who are YOU, sir,
and what do you wantP'
Madame" he whispered, aiding
do~n one step. II have compound
remedy for the cAtar,b.'
"Whose catarIh, s;rl'
"Madaue, / am selling my oa;arh =
"Where il your cAtarrh where ia
itF' she interrupted.
lie got down on the seconi step, and
softly began:
"Madame. | have sure cure for
catarrh, and / am selling lots Of it"
"Wsll. what 40 l carei lust you
ring my door-bsll. aud tell nae ysu are
selling lots Of catatrh medicine7"
He got down on the walk, clear "a
the steps, and he tried to look beauti.
ful around the mouth as he expl.i
"hadame, dien't | ak you II your
husband was ever troubled with the
catarrhf'
ayes, sir, and dida's | reply that he
was deadl b. You wish to nee his
graveF'
"No, madame, l do not. I'm sony
hes dead. but my catarrh remedy can,
help bin any. Goodbye, madame"
"Here, sir. hold on a minutel she
called. what was yonr business with
mel
"Why. | have remedy for the
catarrh."
90 you sAtd Del tre.
II asked you if you didu't want tc
purchase, and"
"You are a falsif.r, sir, you nevel
asked me to purchased"
"Do-you-want--a bottlef' hs
slowly asked.
eyes, sir; give me two of them; her,
is Jour money!. Next time you want
to sell catarrh remedy, don't begin to
talk about America being discovered
by Columbus. Here you have bother
ed fifteen minutes and put all my work
behind, and it's good for you that
didn't bring the broom to the door"
He retreated back ward through the
gate, his left eye squin.ed up and bis
mouth open. He shut the front gate
leaned ever and looked at the from,
door. Bv and by hs said:
"Darn 's'pl You never can tell
where To ind '.m."
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HrMAwAus - A r~vn.