Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-06-15
How the Parson ssSet" a Hen.

A middle-aged yellow hen that resides
with the Parsons family, and which has
for some weeks past been dealing in
eggs, had chosen as her base OF opera
lions one corner of thu Parsons car
riage-shed. One day last week the hen
arrived at that stage of her business
when it was necessary to sit, which she
signified by the usual signs. This was
mentioned at breakfast by the Parsons
wife, who advised that the hen have
chance forthwith. But the ParsOn
wanted that part of the carriage-shed,
and advised that she be set in the wood
shed. There was no use to expostulate
with him. He was s.boss around here,
and not the hem After breakfast he
laid off his coat, took an old AK, and
after four hours chopping and pound
ing, he succeeded in converting an old
wheelbarrow into what he supposed to
be nest far superior to the one in the
carriage-shed. Then he put in twenty
nice white eggs. "There now," said
he, ST could sit on that nest myself if I
were hen.n He then went to get the
hen. She pecked at him savagely. He
got the horse blanket and threw it over
her head to save his hands while carry
ing her to the new nest. He dropped
her into the wood shed, but she did not
see the nest. She only stood in the
middle of the shed and turned her feath
ers all the wrong way and clucked and
sQuawked and screamed like a hyena in
q graveyard. He showed her toward
the nest, but she did not understand.
Then he got fishpole, and was pro-
ceeding to direct her with it, when she
darted past his legs and out, and in
three seconds was at the old nest. He
was patient, and soon had her back.
But still she did not see the nest. He
shut the door and went for some shelled
corn. When he came back the hen was
gone. So he scattered some corn around
and in the nest among the eggs, and
then stopped up hole under one side
of the shed by which it seemed she had
taken her departure. He then brought
the hen back, closed the door, put her
down kindly, and flung some more corn
in the direction of the nest. For a mo-
ment the hen seemed reasonable. She
picked up the corn about the nest; then
she got up on one side of it and fished
out the last grain from among the eggs;
then she stood up erect, shook her feath-
ers NIGHTLY, stretched her neck till
it was as long as goose's, and, to the
parsons great delight, seemed about to
take possession of the nest. But to his
great dismay she gave a scream that
would have awakened the dead a mile
away, and then hew out of small win
dow ten feet from the ground and did
not touch the side as she passed out.
The parson restrained his anger. He
stopped every hole in the shed which
fly could get through. He brought her
back and placed her on the nest, piled a
whole armful of boards over her and
weighted them down with stone as big
as he could lift. Then he locked the
door and put the key in his pocket, and
walked off with that peculiar feeling
one has after gaining conquest. In
about two hours he had occasion to 90
to the carriage shed. AS ne passed the
wood shed he INDUCED him self in a con-
gratulatory chuckle, and was just think
ing how much better it was to be m AN
than hen as he entered the carriaget
shed, when he was greeted by defiant
challenge from the hen, who was on the
nest again and ready to maintain her
rights. He lost his temper, picked up
an old broom which lay at hand, and
pounded her off the nest. She flew to
the horse trough, and he followed. In
his haste and wrath he made the horse
break loose, and he was soon galloping
over the yard and garden. The dog be-
gan to bark at the horse, and a general
melee followed, which was taken part
In by pigs, calves, chickens, horse and
family. In seven minutes there was not
q whole f1ower-pot in the yard, or good
plant or vine in the garden, not to men
ton the other damage done. 1t ended
by the horse breaking down the front
gate and starting on a run for his old
home, five miles away. The wife then
proceeded to make some remarks which
the parson was not very interested to
hear, and so he took his hat and went
to bring back his horse. When he re-
turned he found new fiower-pots in the
yard, couple of boys were at work in
the garden, carpenter was hanging a
new gate, and in the carriage shed sat
the hen on large nest of eggs. He paid
the bills and remained qaiet.-ADaericaa
Poultry Yard.