Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-12-25
PITH AND POINT.
A CORN annihilator-The pig.

A CORN annihilator-Thep pig.
A LIGHT employment-Making gas.
A HARD set-The hen on porcelain
eggs.
TIE place for fats-In a tenement
house.
ELECTRICITY in Frankln's time was a
wonder, but we now make light of it.
An eminent historian traces baseball
back to the tine when Rebecca went
down to 9.t the well ,sTith pitcher and
A PHILOSOPHER says, 'The man who
laughs is the sympathetic man." It is
astonishing how many sympathizers o
fellow has when he slips down and
hurts himself.
"WHAT is the whole d7,ty Of mar
ried MANI" ITO he agreeable to his
wife. What is the whole duty of a
married woman?" To be agreeable. "
From tie French.
/" If l have ever usn.l any unkind
words, Hannah" said Mr.. Smiley. re-
tiectlvely, 81 take them all back. ="
Yes, 1 suppose you want to use them
over again, was the not very soothing
reply.
An old couple were walking down the
street reading signs, when they ran
across one which the old man read thus:
"Johnson's Shirt Store" "Weli. l de-
clare" exclaimed the old lady, "I won
Ger how he tore it !"
PA" asked Fogg's hopeful the other
evening, "what kind of comb do they
use to curry chickens with % "Cox-
combs" respon i Fogg, promptly.
Fogg says he believes in always answer
ing child when you can.
A MICHIGAN man saved himself from
a watery grave the other day by hanging
On the ice with his chin. A man pos.
sessed of chin enough to hang himself
by ought to cut figure in Congress-
Ne1o York Commercial Advertiser.
LITTLE Pon1Y,5 aged, attends Trinity
Church. On reaching home, she de-
scribes it to her mother: cit was ever
SO much larger than our chapel, and had
colored glass in the windows made into
pictures. I saw the King, Queen and
knave, but there wasn't any ace"
An old man with a head as destitute
Of hair as. watermelon entered a drug
store and told the clerk he wanted q
bottle of hair restorer. "What kind Of
hair restorer do you prefer?" ''Ireckon
I'll have to take bottle of red hair re-
storer. That was the color of my hair
when 1 was boy"
EXTRACT from a young lady's letter {:
And, do you know, Maud and I are
quite sure Capt. Popple had taken too
much champagne at the ball, for he
took out his watch and looked hard at
the back of it and then muttered ::
:Blesh my shout hadn't any dea it
was this time O. night.
Chow ARE you and your wife coming
on?" asked Galveston man of a col
oled man. "She's run me of, boss. 1"
"What's the matter ?" ellis to blame,
boss. gave her a splendid white silk
dress, and den she got so proud she had
no use for me. She lowed I was too
dark to match de dress. "-Zeras .Sift.
ings.
A GENTLEMAN was relating to friend
how party of young fellows got full at
o wedding. He said one of them went
up stars just a braiding. The friend
said: "Well, what in the world is braid
ing? That is q new one on me. " The
man who was telling the story said :
"You don't know what braiding is. eh il?
He was braiding three strands, two
strands of legs and one strand of ban
nisters." That seemed to be so plain
that any man who had ever gone up
stairs drunk could readily realize the
situation. Sun.
PROPER ENGLISH.
why shall we say for catched, caught,
A grammariane some say we ought?
Let US zee
How things be
When this kind Of teaching is taught:
The egg isn't Matched, it is baught;
Ny breechee arcet patched. they are paught;
J. hn and Jane are not matched, they are maueht:
My d. or isn't atched, it Is ianght;
the pie wasn't snatched IT was sliauRht;
The Get never scratched, hut she scranght;
The roof wasn't matched, it ~ss thaught
II Eng,ith muet this way he wrought
1t soon will be matched that 10 naught.
E. 81. NJ, SUMPrER, S. c.: "I am a
young man, carpenter by trade. / feel
that I must go to Texas. Please answer.
Is it very hot in Texas in summer, and
what could I make by working at my
trade in Austan?" It is quite hot
seldom abve 500, however. With re.
g,srd to what ydh could make, working
at your trade, we presume you could
make tables and chairs and wheel bar.
rows and bed Stats and such things, that
is if you understand your business and
you might make amends by leading an
honest life, for whatever rascality you
were guilty of in the old States or you
might make your escape if the officers
get after You. There is no end to the
number of things you could make in
Austin, beside good reputation, if you
would set your mind on it.-Ieras
Siftings.