Charlotte messenger. [volume] (Charlotte, Mecklenburg Co., N.C.) 1882-18??, 1882-10-28
Spoopendyke STOPS Smoking.

SpOopendyke Stops smoking. y
"My dear" said Mr.. Spoopendyke,
rumpling his hair around over his head
and gazing at himself in the els 8; "my
dear, do you know think smoke too
much ? It doesn't agree wit me at all. ;
'sJust what have always thong ht I
chimed Mrs. Spoopendyke, ''snd
besides, it makes the room smell so.
You know this room" t~ ' .t'
"I'm not talking about the room, y
retorted Mr.. Spoopendyke, with a
snort, "I'm not aware that it affects
the health of the room, I'm talking
about my health this trip, and I think
I'll break off short, You don't catch
me smoking any more," and Mn
Spoopendyke yawned and stretched
himself, and plumbed down in his easy
chair and glared out the window at the
rain.
"How are you going to break off ?"
inquired Mrs. Spoopendyke. drawing
mp her sewing CHAIR. and Rssing up
into her husband's face Admiringly. "I
suppose the best way is not TO think Of
it at ALL"
1.-THE best way is for you to sit there
and cackle about, itir growleds Mr..
Spoopendyke. "f anything will dis
tract my attention from it that will.
Cant ye.think Of something else 70 talk
about 2 Don't ye know some subjects
that don't smell like tobacco planta-
tionY" ''-4'
"Cersainly. rcoosd Mrs. spoopendyke,
rather nipplussed. '.We might talk
about the rain. suppose this is really
Che equinox. How long VIII IL last,
'dearY s9eag - 81. A. a,gat
"Gast the eqqinoxl r. sputtered Mr..
'Spoopend yke. "Don't you know that
when q man quits smoking il depresses
him? What dye want 81, talk about de-
pressing things for? Now's the time
to make me cheerful. II ye don't know
any cheerful things, keep quiet.p'e Q
"Of course" assented Mrs Spoopen-
dyke, lyon want subjects that will draw
your mind away from the habitof smok-
ing like you used TO. . Won's II be nice
when. the, long winter evenings come,
and the fire is lighted and you have
your slippera and papeE--n v.ag.. usr
s.That'g Just the time I want p cigar r.
roared MI Spoopendyke. bounding
around in his chair and scowling at his
wife saint ye got sense enough to
sbingle your tongue for a minute? The
way you're keeping it up you'll drive
me back TO my habit in less'n an hour, !"
he continued solemnly, "and then my
blood will be on your head |"
"Oh. dear |" sighed Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, 81 didn't mean to. Did you notice
about the comet : They say it is going
to drop into the sun and burn up"
s.There ye go again |" yelled Mr..
Epoopendvke. "You can'ts open, your
mouth without suggesting something
that breaks me down? What dye want
to talk about fire for 7? Who wants fire
when he's stopped smoking1 Two min
utes more and I'll have a pipe in my
mouth" ard Mr.. Spoopendyke gtoaned
dismally in contemplation of the pros
pect. aI III
: I'm glad you're going to stay at home
to-day" continued Mrs. Spoopendyke,
soothingly. You'd be sure to catch
cold if you went out and by and by
we'll have piping hot dinner"
"Thst's It'll" squealed Mr.. Spoken
dyke. bounding out of his chair and
plunging around tne room: ioI q go'
70 say some.ning ao0"s . pipe l Ane~
nowlt would oe ! Aou wans me 70 ols'
ION want me 70 smoke !ystp n lnso An AN
yourself any uueasinessl You're on the
.rackFl ana MI 1PooPenuyke nuEleu
MS race IN MS nAnoS ana SHOOK conVui-
siveiy.
u meant II Ior tne Dest' my oeat,
murmured Mira bpookenoykes