Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1882-03-16
FINN on Wheels.


We went up to see the roller skaters
the other night The trick of the thing
is to get some green hand to put on che
uncertain contriyances in order to make
fun for the spectators. They approach
ed us. but we convinced them it would
be dangerous to turn us loose on rollers
in hall where others were present.
We once put on skates in a meadow
which had overlooked. and inside OF one
short hour had broken Il COWS leg and
knocked down three lengths of fence.
We would begin fall in the middle of
the pasture and not be able to call it n
finished job until we had struck plowcd
ground in the next field. Weconyimced
these fellows we were also disposed to
be regular boomerang. We laid the
fellow up for repairs who got lis to put
on those skates. He started us out in
the direction of clear sailing, but our
sta board LEG ran athwart our la'board
limb, we gave a tremendous push 10 UNI
ship our rigging this turned us COM
pletely about and we returned on the
back tack with falling swoop, striking
our assistant and knocking CROUCH wind
out Of him to run a bagpipe for seven
minutes.
This discouraged The young men who
had hoped TO have pic mic with us;
but soon we saw them leading Corbett
OF the NclcS, to the slaughter. They put
on his skates, stood him up. and gave
him push as send off. He kept his
feet together and tried to DIG in his
heels, but the skates kept right on. His
body could not keep up, and as he be-
gan to unbalanee, his heels flew up.
For a sixteenth part of second, awheel-
barrow could have been run under him
at any place, but he did not stay up
there long. He struck the floor with "a
vigorous expression that made the Win
dows rattle, and as he rolled back his
head sounded one of those hollow, spite
full bumps that will make a floor ache
for half an hour. The boys yelled, and
hooted, and pounded each other in try
ing to get rid of their mirth, while the
girls rammed their handkerchiefs in
their mouths and busted their waist
bands with suppressed emotion.
Corbett's hackers got him up, and ex-
planned to him he lacked confidence.
He must not try to stop-but launch out
and keep turning out for things till he
ran down. They let 90 of him, and he
gave n flourish with his hands and q big
push with one foot, and went scudding
down the hall followed by Il little black
and tan rat dog, that had got a firm
hold on the bottom of his pantaloons,
and went sliding along, sending out a
different shaped grow every time it
shook its head Dick had not Stacked
up any as he approached the wall, not
withstanding the four ounce dog was
pulling back with all its might He
crooked his legs the way he wanted to
turn, but kept going raightforward.
Some one called to the crowd standing
ahead of him: sect out of the way
there" and they had just time to get
ont Of the way, as the skater went head
foremost. with whang, against the
wall; he then reversed and sat down on
the four ounce dog with force that
broke a growl off before it was half end
ed and left the smashed pet looking
like lamp mat with n scarlet fringe.
They pulled the skater out the cash
mere hat, which had been damned clear
down TO his shoulders, and wheeled him
OFF, to make room for fresh champion
In the arena-d1roya B{ade.