The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1882-03-21
Seuse and Nu',se,tse.

10 Oe sure OF gOOu Welg0t-Go 10
the barber shop Saturday night.
Kick your corn through window
glass aud the pane is gone forever.
The man who works without recon-
pense gets no hire in his profession.
Silence is golden, but some men think
silence is golden only when it is o'er.
When couple make up their mind to
get married i; may he called tie vote;
II it takes ten mills 10 make a cent
where are the profits on barrel of
iour2
A water-spout was seen on Lake Erie
few days ago. at the time OF heavy
squall.
The noblest thing IN the world-A
piano; because it is upright, grand and
square.
Wise is he who drinks beer sparingly
Budweizer is he who lets i. alone alto.
ge,her.
Clara Louise Kellogg will not sing
any more after she gets married. 1t is
said she will lecture.
A Boston singer was compelled to
stop and request the removal Of "thal
young one" from the hall.
"That's what heats me-" as the boy
said when he saw his father take the
skate-strap dowD from its accustomed
nail.
P,stmsn-"Say, sis. where's Mrs
Mallev O'Dearmont Sis-"I'd' nor.
She diei last week and didn't leave any
directions
81 notice that a firm Of brokers in
Toronto has failed for S250,000, and
has no assets-not cent. have for
watded the cake. cashier Baldwin.
Miss Alice L,ngfellow, the daughter
OF the poet, has strong and clever face
with charming brown eyes and q, deli
cate, so't color in her cheeks,
Wherein is the average church con-
gregation better than The highwayman ?
Does il not m axe the poor preacher stand
and deliver every Sunday2
Miss Arsmints Gashington speaks of
the ''so.e season of loaned She
never could bring herself to say Lent.
1t is so painfully vulgar, you know.
Class in de6n;tions-"What is a mo-
nopoly ?" "That rival establishment over
the way" When is monopoly not q
monopoly" When it is in your own
hands"
Ftgg. "What do you think of my ar
gument, Fogg3'
Fogg ut was sound very sound"
(Fisg is delighted) nothing but sound,
IN fact"
Bernum has lived seventy-two years,
and wants to live seventy-two years
longer. The fact that there will be no
circuses in the next world appears to
have discouraged the veteran Snowman.
II know" said the little girl to her
eldest sisters young man at the supper
table, ''tbat you will join in our society
for the protection of little birds, be-
cause mamma says you are very fond of
larks"
The New York Commercial Adverti-
ser has sand enough to come out and
spell it WIND, instead of wind. Ii the
wynd blows let her rip, and it you spell
it sacqne be man enough 10 also call it
hacqne.
The money value of the American
dairy product is near 100000, 900,
which is greater than the wheat or corn
product, and exceeds that OF cotton and
wool combined. Capital invested ex-
ceeds 100000.
"Haunah." said a BROOKLYN lady to
her new servant, "when there is any bad
news always let the boarders know Of it
before dinner. Such little things make
a great difference in the eating in the
course Of year."
A man has been arrested in New York
for defacing the Andre monument. An
DIRE, it will he remembered, was gen.
tleman who tried to bluff George WASH
ington, aud subsequently died with his
boots on.
A Little Rock paper mltigates the
crime of man Who committed suicide
there last week. by saying it was his first
offensp. Very likely he had not been
long in the State, or he would have
made the attempt sooner.
A New York paper saws that Blanche
Howard, the author of Zone Sum mer,"
is Low in Stuttgart, Germany. 1t is
now believed that the author Of one
winter is also ont of the country, and
has taken the winter along,
A woman has sharper eyes than a
man Any love passage that may be
going about her woman will detect in
an instant. With man it is different.
He will not perceive a kiss. even. uuIess
it is brought right under his nose.
"My dear child" observed a good
deacon to an urchin who was polishing
a cats back with blackning brush on
the Lords day, shave YOU never attend
ed Sunday schoolp" Nav" responded
the urchin frankly Il don't go to places
OF amusement"
When a mans hair stands on end an
ordinary person saws his hair stands
but you can. get doctor to talk in
that way. The doctors call it horripila-
ton. This makes the patients hair
stitch up worse than ever, but it gives
the family confidence in the doctor.
A letter addressed ITO the prettiest
girl in S dalia. Missouri" is posted up
for claimant. The girls all say "Il
looks like his writing. wish they had
just sent it to me and not stuck it up
that way in a public place. I'll never
get it now"
A school teacher at Albany, Athens
county, in order tu develop the minds
of his pupils, the other day required
each one to express on slip of paper
and hand to him what asocation he ex.
pected to follow, or in other words what
he or she.expected to be in the future
The report from sprightly ten year
old miss was "A poor mans wife
The Washington dispatches state that
unless an assurance is given by Grants
friends that he will retire as soon as re-
stored to his military position by ths
bill now pending in Congress, the meas
ure will be defeated by General Sher
mans friends. General Sherman evi
lden,ly does not believe in taking dow