St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1882-01-28
A SIOUX BILL OF FARE.

latest United States style OF feeding
the noble red man is the fact that
he is given government rations, and
at the same time appropriations are
made which are supposed to main
tain him.
Sometimes wild Indian who
don't know much about groceries
and how to prepare them for food
comes in and draws his regular, sol
dier ration in this way. For in
stance, up in Sitting Bulls country
awhile ago, an Indian came in from
the war-path who had never seen
any of the pale-face style of food,
and drew his rations.
He made a light meal of green
unground coffee the first day, and,
as he over-ate, and the coffee swell
ed in him, he had difficulty in but
toning his pants around the pain
that he had on hand
He felt very unhappy for a day
or two, but laid it to the fact that
he hadn't exercised much, and the
consequent ennui and Indigestion
resulted therefrom.
As soon as ne had succeeded in
getting the Interior department
quieted down a little, he tackled his
ratiou of candles. These he deci-
ded to parboil, in order to avoid
trouble from Indigestion. The dish
was not 50 much of II glittering sue
cess as he had anticipated, and as
he remorsefully picked the candle
wicking out of his teeth with q tent
pin, he made some remarks that
grated harshly on the athetic ears
of those who stood near.
He then tried a meal of yeast
powders with vinegar. He ate the
yeast powders and then took pint
of extremely potent vinegar to wash
it down.
At first there was feeling OF
glad surprise in his stomach, which
rapidly gave place to unavailing re-
morse.
4 can q yeast powder il an In
dlan's stomach don seem e. be pre-
pared for pint of vinegar, and the
result of such an unfortunate COM
binaticn is not gratifying.
Every little while look of pain
would come over the features of the
noble child of the forest, and then
he would jump about seventeen
feet and try to kick Il cloud out Of
the sky. Then he would sit down
aud think over his past life.
It took about Il week for him to
set back 10 where he dared TO get .
up another meal for himself Then |
he fricaseed couple of pounds of !
laundry soap and ate that.
Soap is all rlght Tor external pur-
poses, or for treating pair of soil
ed socks. bat 1t does not assimilate
with the gastric juices readily, and
those Who nave tried fried laundry
soap as a relish do not seem to
think hat 1t will ever arrive at any
degrtb Of prominence as an article
of diet.
That is why this untutored child
Of nature swore. He had never re-
ceived the benefits of early training
in profanity, and his language there
tore was disconnected and rambling
but when we consider that he was
ignorant OF our language. and that
every little while he had to stop and
hold on to his digester with beth
hands and dig holes in the earth
with his feet, the remarks didn't
seem altogether out of place or ir-
relevant.
When a gallon or so of agitated
baking powder & vinegar is singing
It's little song in the innermost re-
,esses of an Iudian, and this has
oeen followed by treatment of
aundry soap. the student of human
nature can find wide field for OBJ
III that locality.
The earnest and occupied look,
he troubled expression Of the coan
enance, followed hy the quick. ner-
.ous twitch!ng OF the muscles Of the
nee and the swelling up of the
,ody, tue bursting Of the suspender
,utton, the deep draw sigh and
he smothered cuss words, Ill be-
oxen the gastric agitation going Oh
within.
That is why an Indian prefers a
link OF bologna sausage and Il two
ear old dog TO TIE ligh-priced
50 common. to our modern
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