The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1882-12-21
FROZEN FACTS.
TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT a
GRAND CONCERT"
How a Candid Critic Astouish-
ed a Community.


Grand Concert-Dhe regular an
null exhibition of good clothes an,
bad music, that has grown to be
feature of the musical word in Shaw
aeetown, came off last evening a
the opera house. Every seat in tn
hail was taken, for our patent com
munity has been accustomed to thii
affliction, and submits to it without
.murmur four or five times year
very much as they take quinine II
the spring. .a4a...-.,..i --ss5a = z.ss
Those people who came stamping
in late, as usual, after the Shawnee
town style, are to be congratulated
this time, as they escaped hearing
the "Arion Quartette, sing "Here IL
Cool Grot." 1t is due 20 the "Arior
Quartette," however, to say this was
not the worst singing of the even
ing. The audience thought it Ger
tainly would be the worst; and sc
indeed it was, until later in the
evening the same quartette butch
cred Come Where my Love Lies
Dreaming" 1t was dreadful beyond
description, and the deafening ap-
plause which followed it only testi-
fed the great joy of the audience
after being assured that the "Arion
Quartette" would sing no more that
evening.
Miss Abigail McGinnesy rem
dered a recitative and an aria, by
Cappole, in the manner that has
long ago become so sadly familiar
to our suffering people, and is al
ways a source of profound embar
rassment to the accompanist, who
foundered along last night in the
patient but vain hope of getting
even with the singer somewhere by
scrambling across lots and heading
her off in some prolonged run. But
this was impossible, and the singer
and the accompanist were never in
six bars of each other during the
whole of the alleged performance.
Mr.. Poundawa, the time-honored ac-
companist in all these affairs, by
the way, did even worse than usual
last evening. We are panied to
notice that this habit of playing on
the edge of the piano, two inches
away from the keys, grows upon
him, and he should either change
his drink or his vocation.
Mrs. Bangalon played "Monas-
terry Bells" AS usual it was dis
guised under a French name in the
program; but every one knows what
is coming after Mrs. Bangalon
finally gets the piano moved into
precisely the right place-which is
always just where it stood before
she had it moved the first time
and after seating herself for the
fiftieth time, finally concludes to re-
main seated. Mrs. Bangalon's un-
varying habit of wearing her gloves
to the piano and occupying seven
minutes in removing them is not
an afectation. 1t is an act of
mercy and gives the people nearest
the door an opportunity to slip out
before she begins to play. The re-
porters of the city press used to go
out at this time; but since Banga-
lon has taken to standing at the
door to watch refugees, they have
with excellent taste and better
Judgment abandoned the custom,
and silently swallowed their full cup
of misery. AS Mrs. Bangalon left
the stage Joab Garbey, who was
asleep IN the gallery, fell off his
chair, and, mistaking the noise for
an encore, Mrs. Bangalon returned
and pounded out" "Maiden's Prayer"
Somebody ought to kill that man
Garbey.
Prof" Snowpost played a violin
solo DE Beriot's Seventh Air"
Everybody was grateful that he
didn't try the eighth. The pro-
fressor dresses like a waiter, and
handles a fiddle like a graduate
from a side-show. He is in great
demand at all the dances down at
Wyseker's Branch and the Sassa
fras Bottomes, and it is believed, in
fact, that all his musical education
was acquired at Dan Coseman's
store, at the old ford, on Clyman's
creek. He is trying to get up a
class in this city, and if this man
attempts to teach our boys to play
the fiddle as he does, he ought to
be lynched.
Miss Uppercea played the same
old improvisation" she began play
ing in these concerts eighteen years
ago. 1t lasts about as we'll as her
diamonds, and changes about as lit
tie. 1t is time she had it publish
ed and improvised something new.
Jim Thurlow came out and sang
his unchanging "Ah, so Fair"
The agony of the audience during
this time of trial was fairly insup-
portable. His high notes are
greatly admired, becouse his voice
always breaks into a thin falsetto
squeak on them, and he can't make
so much noise as he can on his
chest tones. If Jim had been born
dumb or his audience deaf the
world would be much happier.
The only excuse for putting Miss
Ah oANbN OA SAC OAOSAaLA SNSA1 bAA1C
there is a cencert in Shawnee town
is that her father is worth $4,000
and owns the biggest brewery in
Lowell county. With voice, mu-
sical education and general ability
aboat up to the grade of Baby
Mine" she sung her old stand, by
last night, the ''Spinning wheel
Song" from Faust" If Marguer-
lie could have sung it as Miss Malt
by sung it, it would have saved the
poor child a world OF trouble. IT.
would have scared Faust, Mephisto
pheles, and the whole gang of them
out of the country. There is more
mnsic in Dir. Maltby's bung- start
ers than there is in his daughter.
Mr.. Bellows sang "Oh, Ye Tears
Mr.. Bello, has a rich, baritone
voice-a wheelbarrow tone, that is
Unfortunately for his effort last eve
ming, nobody knew he was singing
until he finished the butchery of art
and bowed himself off the stage.
Everybody thought he was trying
his voice. If ever his voice is tried.
It will be convicted on its own evi