davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

strength ofhis own. The humorous press may not have a mission. The people may be thankful tha; ii has not The paper and man of mission are bofes. l he sensational paper. filled with murder and scandal. escapes the censure of inc re- forming editor. The political lar and the literary thief have miss,ons and are not criticized by him. In. humorous paper. refined and really eleN ailns n tone. makes him howl. He cannot see the use of its existence. bat ne forgets tha, millions of people enloy what he re- regards a. the foameSt of nonsense. lie will write a column article on some eA- ploded theory of reform and imagine that his suggestions are accepted by the masses aud treasured up D ;he sages- His egotsm will no, allow hin 10 see his own lack of originality. Like lilaie. what he has written. he has written. The humorous paper> o: AEerca are more effective in matters oi reform than their srea, daily eontempor- aries. The grea; daily < politician. and directs its power agalns; the evils oi he opposite party. The generosity oi acknowledgment, Is unknown. IL covers up fraud in it's own ranks and seeks to uncover il in the ranks of the opposing faction. The humorous paper ridieules the foibles of society. IL exercises an in- fuence on the minister and the judge Among its lightly written linee there are serious truths. impa-tially spoken. II advocates the political claims ot no rascal.
 The humorous paper of Ame1ea may no, be a permanent, institution. \ few thousand years may lay I, low; and when its grave is dug. when the political editor and the literary critic come and look at is remains. they ~ili no doub, weep over it's untlmely death.
 Roll on. politics. art and science roll until your wheels stop agains' the ever lasting limit of all further progression. roll on. and as you travel you will see humor. in lish; gambol keeping ID with you.
 Rush forward thought. eiu atlon md weakness of the flesh -prs!. forward. and when you attain the srea, helsf,. to loek from whose summ,. makes yea dizzy and van, 10 % home. look to Near Isl; and there YOU will ind humor. e.otlcC. ii li.H costume. nimbly flirting win .l.e -ol!tes> of eternal ,nrth.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
HUMOROUS PAPERS STABBED.

An eastemloumal of literary aim la ments the sad fac, that 50 many humor- ous papers are springlng up all over the country and that so many of the daily pa pers surrender so much of their valuable space 10 the frethy nonsense of Amenean whim. The blighting satire was written after the editor had made repeated efforts to De humorous. Failing-,he inevitable fate of all premeditated humor-he sud- denly discovers that humorous papers can not live. and that their editors must sooner or later be aroused to sense of the sandy foundation on which they stand. The editor of the eastern paper of literary aim is by no means pioneer in warning the American people against journalistic ligh,ness- He is member of the disappointed class. probably, and by drawing attention to the weakness of other journals attempts 10 show the
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
A SAD SERMON.

It IS with unfeigned regret that we make mention of sad fact. Our duty is :e assist m holding up the knap-sack of life. not in pressing upon +, But there are times. ;ha, come to all men. when we mus, throw aside the foolish song of the eficke; and listen to the hoarsc bawl of the town COW. The other day very es- unable gentleman died near this city. He was respected in hIs neighborhood and his death spattcred dark varnish over the entire community. \ well known minister. editor ot religious pa- per. was called upon to preach the good man, funeral :" My friends. the minister began. we have met here upon very solemn occasion. The de1easca was a worthy man, good man. and although he owes me two dollars for my paper hope that he'll go to heaven. l don't see hcW he can. for the chances are against him. but hope so. His voice has often been heard in the house ct prayer. and his la,ch-string hung on the outside of his door But he owed me for years subscription to the G,spri Horn. and as say hope that hell go 10 heaven but blamed ii 1 see how he can. Like Cesar. when the poor hath @ep,. his nose drip ped with unch6sed emotion. His hear, was tender and he did no, live n vain. bu, las; January. while m the full bloom ef hi, strength. he subscribed for my pa per and did not pay me. He was good man and may secure a harp. but I'll be dad hustled fl the chances ain; asains, him. If there's any man here who feels like disputing my word. lei him ba, his eve; II not. we'll plant the deceased.
 lt's sad tha, we must record such a fact bu, il canno, be avoided. The hon. ored gentleman should have paid his subscription.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
CORN AND COTTON.

The old er. of cotton .s. corn has again come up. In this state few revo- lu;ionay gentlemen have attempted 10 teach the people that il is mistake to raise cotton. The cultivation 0: cotton n Vermont would no doub, prove unprph,able. bu, in Arkansaw the staple brings !n money. Just at time. too. whenaa few pictures of IT ncle Sam are highly necessary. The northern papers have taken up the cotton and corn question. and in handing ou; a plateful of cold wisdom. ,he Chicago 7rsaans- saws: In the september num- Der of the report of the condition of the corn and other crops of the United States by the National Bureau of Agriculture there is a very interesting chapier on the value of statistics % he agricultural in- teres;s of the nited States. and the a.gu- meni IS enforced by number of illustra- tons. Among other things the report calls attention to the fac, iha; statistics have been useful in reducing the over- weening egotism of the cotton interest. which assumed the regency of produc- ton and the dictate rship of foreign ex- change Statistics prove that corn crop is worth two or three of cotton, and that the area of maize ia the cotton bel, exceeds the acreage of cotton |, is also proved that while the production of the fibre has been greatly enlarged the value of exports has been reduced from to 10 D per cen, of the volume of exports of ag- riculture. The report adds:
 -Tke cereals have taken ,he leading po- sition n export. and the products of the plebeian hog alone equal in value hal, the eNpou of ,he pa;roian cotton crop. That's all very well. bu, still cotton brings money to the Arkansaw gentleman Probably he may have to buy corn. bu, s,ll he will show up better m the end than the man who paid most of his at;en- ton to corn. The cotton states are TO: essentially corn districts The prodac; viii not brng so fair a puoe n the mar ket as western corn. Cotton may 10, be king but II Is good friend 10 have at court.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

THE editor of the CfUIn,i. In a short re.iew af W. p. Hewells Modern h. stance. the conclusion of winch appears in the current number of tha, magazine. says ,ha, II is the most notable reform story produced since the first publication of Uncle Toms Cabin. The reform commended by the CentHry Is Howells' treatment of hurried divorce trials. their leoseness and utter want of solemnity or even justice. \ reform IS much needed
 in this department of ,he judiciary, but then the entire system of so-called ius;ice IS So far removed from real justice ,ha, II ould be difficult ,e single out the weak est place. The story aS literary pro- drc,ion cannot be called an unqualined srceess l, deals with common place ch aracters and truthful phase of home lie. but its characters have nothing to ke CD them before you, and the home life is painful. George Elliot's Slla> Manner :" IS a story of yer, commonplace people. but you enter into the warmth of their lives. see the old sione-pits and hear the despairing cy of ;he mlser. Ho~ells s,ory is true, bu, i, is painful truth. II ends abruptly and unsasisfaotorily. You close the las, chapters feeling that few more lnes arc needed 10 complete the ,-,lnp,e
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
RIGID TECHNICALLY.


 In Ar&ansax. ;eel.a! ...;y in law is ob- scr,ed ani a-.ec upon ~i;h unwayer!ng exac;aess. if4 mar ae.e iadie,ed fer cornn.;.ir. I..-s:er B Il a spade. and upon ,rial :. ~ere prove: n; :ie cri..e had been committed n a shovel. the murderer v8ziG ,t 5a--~e se discharged and he ,ho.e. he'a
 This ciazc over :echns sai.ty .s sorrow- fully Illustrated n I. -atrence tha, IS so far removed !-1.a .c1 | @eAsonins that e.erH one ms, rcec.,e wi:h dash of incred4li:y me ..:ne ago Cap;aia Ar thur Ma;:sfield was e!e,:c4 ;o the legisla- ture from a remotely r-f1. county. A5ou, ,hc same ,.lae 'aan Has.ed Anderson Mayhub NJ, sen.cn-eG :oa one years term n the peni;ea, art having been convicted $. larceny :, some mistake unaccegn,a5le and almrs; beyond belief Mansfield had been given the prisoncr's eer1aea;e instead Q; hi, credentials .; election. When the speaker of ,l.e house ran his red eSe oyef he doc4mea;- he said withou, the slightest show of emo ton;
 Mir. Mausneld there ls li;tle matter of mistake here. This paper entities you to one years term n the pcni;en,aD in- stead of seat ln ,his legislative body. Ne must he very particular in these matters, for the people must be repre- sented. The Serseant-at-arms will please take charge of this gentleman
 Mattsheld didn't know what 10 say or how 10 say l. and conducted To corner sf the room by the officer. he stood as one who is overtaken by great calamity and Is unable to ind voice. Jus, then d deputy sheriff entered. conducting May hub. the convict. Advancing to the speakers stand. the deputy extended paper and said:
 There has been a mistake made in re- gard 10 this paper.
 The speaker read the credentials and turning to Mayhub said This docu- men; sir entities you to sea; in the leg ,l~;Ne halls of your state. Receive the oath ef office. Mayhub ~as sworn in wi,h bsfiipas ceremony Now." said inc speaAes. aeitsffessins the deputy. you t.n ,ake Mr Maasiieid ,a tie pen. and abey lng aithoa; pfatestaiion the oi;i, q sezed Aia,i,ncld and led him away. Syr- eTa f-#cnds o: he victim. signed a peti- son. setting forth the truth af the a.i.sir. and iora arded i, h ihe remotely iurai judge. shortly afterwards :he speaker ot ;hc house received ;ac following "lt h4,ng come 10 the knon ledge of this court ,ha: cae Anderson Aiayiiul,. sen- .cnced 10 the peniteniiary. has by mistake of redential> been gwen a seat in the eg.,iaturc m place of one Mausfeld. who happened to be given a certificate of prison sentence. and as the court has been peii.ioncd Tn the matter. the court holds ,ha: ,he sad Mayhub. convicted of lar oeny. keep his place in the legislature which has been given him on ,echni- cal,,y. and tha, the said Ma,,siield. elected io the leg stature but by technicality en- titled To term in the peni,cntiay. do serve the full time or until this court in i,s lsdom and discretion sees hi 10 have Inc entire matter investigated.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
GOULD'S SCHEME.

lay Gosid has alarmed ;he newspapers of New York by making A sisniro .'t move toward the eon,fo, of the associated press of the citv. l, k feared ;hs; ;ae great gambler will not only secure ! con trolling ,n;crcs; n the NeN ioGk 4s,o,.- atetl press. bu, also in the New England and western new> associations. This would indeed be a ripping blow .o ,he American press. in that all new, would Of course be iil,ered by ,ould,> empioycs. But ,he country st,ll has chance ot out spoken freedom Mr Gould has no; succeeded in securing any of the humor- ous papers. although for some time he has had agents working with ;ha, aim. l. would be impossible for Mr Gould 10 sc- cure the control of all the humoris,s. He may buy the political editors. who as pro- fesslonal journalists. would as leave be on one side as the other: he can buy up the members of congress who need money to keep up ap- pearances he may buy up the lawyers who wan, everything they can ge:: he may buy up the preachers to whom much filthy lucre has a musical jingle. bu, he canno, buy the humorl,, and philosopher. He hasn't money enough yei. and l; is not lkel> that he ever Will have. Among the humorous papers. sir. Is where you will find naked honesty. The editor is naked and his debts are honest. Don't attemp, io br,oe the froliosome sketch -.. r,,or
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

\ DISPATCH from Minneapolis gives a sensational accoun, of a runaway locomo- tive While travelling al rapid rNe of speed. the engineer noticed that the loco motive persisted ID a disposition to tra,el .nore rap.diy. The engine had showed an unwiilingness to leave the yard that morning, and had been grumblne and usn,terins all the way. un,ll finally il be- gan 10 exhibit its temper by ranning adlead od time. The engineer remon- strated with the locomotive. explaining the foo.ishness of such demon aration. but the locomotive snor,ed and plunged forward. The engineer pulled and tugged but the monster took the bit between his teeth and flew. The engineer and fire man jumped of and the engine continued its wild course until it collided with box car, when i, stopped. rolled in its anger and lay for time refusing to allow any one to approach it. An investigation shows that the locomotive had never been properly '' broke and that it had been spoiled by undue attention paid to it b, she yard master.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

PF1ER COOPER was born in New York when iha, city only contained a popula- ton of = ,oco The old gentleman has seen many change. and has done much for the education of poor people A, one time he allowed Brick Pomeroy to run him for president. but he was old and childish and didn't know wha, he wa doing lomeroy told hlm tha, his cleo ton was certain. and the simple old man be- lieved him. bu, when he sad they needed abou, fifty thousand dollars ,o conduct the campaign. ,he simple old man did no, believe him.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

~CHErNN warns dramatic companies tha, as l, asks no favors impartial criti- cisms will be gwen. An impartial orti- oism, tempered by judgment, k right. re- sa1diess of iavors. Very few newspapers hovev~i cu,ieise impar,ially. Advertise men,s soften a ontic's pencil. I, IS very natural loo, ior no newspaper will say that one of I,s advertisers deals in poor goods. The dramatic papers. depending for supPors on lhe theatrical profession. may criticise an obscure performer or a star who has incurred the enmity of the editor. bu, as rule. well known actors, even though they fall below expectation, arc rarely criticised as their lack of merit de- serves
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

.l;ufr Is now attracting ,pceial ','cas=n . T inc north. Why this indus ny she-.d have been >o ieag nesle, ted IS ao; kaa',n. The soul is hot-house plan, and needs ] .:reA; deal of attention. With cul;ya. an. the plant grows into beautiful rropor,io:>. blooms n lo,eliness and Shed> -.enous perfume; bu, when neg scc:cd. ;; >hriycls and shfinks into dwarf ish usiine>>. Noul-pian,s that have been < ui,isa:ed are sometimes sold. bu, they e,ill ol7.ear ,ranspian,ing.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
MISSIONARY WORK.

The ARHsN>AW TRAyELEK has ,....- g,-e.t; pleasa:e n referring ,o the useie... nes, ofsnh1; = termed missionary & s.s of -olIee..n- .1ie;se,, n on- horne chur rh-, The follow n fa ;s. collected on the aa.. i.e ground. We md n inc New :, >zH: \ remarkable letter from a cos. -espohden. d: singapore was re.eu. published in the I.onion T:ms5. T.. writer. who .- esiden;ly thoroughly -e e..::.irt-d w.;il ulissionar. work IT ... ea,;. declares ;ha, n India. China. a- everywhere e4se the f..ttaFe ef the # #,. ,.orAries. according ,o ;heir own standa
 ,: success. i> aa form and omplete
 He canee,es .hai Il enc aspect Il h. been wonderfully successful. The " > s.nnaiie> have ciyil4cd and eduea:e- millions of human beings. They haye. the foundation of the educational sys;e. et British India. They have made the B- ble so popuia: n China that i, Is nog widely sought and eagerly read Tn ,ha. enpre. Bu, ,..s n ssionaries themselves. ~e are .old. iespise snch successes d, these iheir ambition Is not 10 make agreeable oT proniaoie members of he- man society. bu; to make christians. San their secular teaching and personal svrl. pathy with ,he people. are only kind e: bait by which they seek 10 allure fish :, their hook. The mere feeding of the rish Is failure in their eyes. \ great man, of them have told ,hs Singapore cores pendent iha; the mere prospect of socia. and eduea;ional success would never have induced them 10 become missionaries.
 These statements are surprising and in- structive. We doubt whether anything so outspokcn and opposed io the ideas which mos, persons desire ,o entertain or the sublec; would have appeared Tn he London IiE:fJ twenty years ago: but peo- pie are not TOW so much afraid of the truth as they were then. They wan, 10 get al the facts and this writer argues With CoHSiGcI.n4c iefte tnds me uuTnOSt oi converts i> so irs;gnif;can, IT propot- ton 10 the machinery employed taat inc failure of m:ssicnary work is not mercls negative, bu, positive. The real religion of I nation canna; bc -,,aaged by m:s- sioaar:cs. hc s.s,s. ..ad :he afdua.s ms >lonary IS :2o: . ,..eh :. ,pe as ,o make @eenter;, IT ;he l'i5her sense. !; is rlr4 ;h.; man be aiac> ! >Sie..a.y # hc c.... da as well in | pc mar. pom; Q: eies !: home. He VI. n: g9 ;o :ie ends of ire earth. as he clils il.
 90. !: would seem ,hAt ,ae churches are working for ;I.c:: oNn sIoTica:!on u satisfy a kind ef eonques;.ng vanity With these fact, u yieW-tacts which canro, be disputed how can an inteli- gen, minister haze the :. check" to ask an overworked man to contribute 70 the sal- vation af a Chinanlan Fine state of re- iigious affairs. No, interested particu- larly in home edu a;icn. oh no. Bu, the Chinanan. ah. gentlemen lc; Us rake him into our own fold
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

,he doctor. = went down to my bottom plantation to see about removing ny stock
 in case of overflow. Afier working a.l day. and dri:ing nearly all of the cattle ;o the uplands. ven; ,o ;he house. a kind of cabin. where proposed te spend he nigh; alone. lay down CT an oll straw bed. when suddenly he thou zh; flashed across me that the leyee might break remembered :a-t |: MS gradually orumbling away. md ;ha: before morning t might giye way and food inc bottoms. There aas real danger of an inpndat!on and ven: ou, to ee; ny horse but he had broken loose and run away. Th:s wa, another cause for alarm. for with aniuya, instinct though, ia; ,ay horse had feared the
 flood N en, back into the house and lay down. iel, as though | season of chais and fevers were coming upon me
 and getting up and empiving alnlos, Il . entire contents of | quinine ba.,le in n
 hand. swallowed the medicine and sa
 down by the rire. The wind raaled anl
 knew that the waves were beating over the levee. l went 10 the door and could hear the rush of the coming waters. No time ,o be lost and rushing 10 Il tree. climbed up is rough bark and perched upon limb and waited. The rushing grew louder and the wind roared among the trees. Presently the water came with terrible sweep. The night was fearfully dark. bu, could see the yellow water and hear il gurgle against the tree. The roar grew louder and the tree shook. The wa;es seemed to De rising rapidly. and attempted 10 climb higher. but to my dis may, l found the top of the tree broken of. thought tha, day would never come. In moving my position slipped from the limb. bn, eaugh, with my hands. am of pretty good weight and could no; pull myself up again. There hung. almost exhausted. The waters rushed and l held myself up as high as could. Will day never comeE I thought. Away off | gray streak ap- peared. Ny arms were numb. could hold on bu, momen, longer I stretched out my fec, in an agony 4f de- spar. They touched soine:hrg I turned loose the li;nb ar4 f.,,r..3 myself s,andin.. en IS dss eafth as is@ ever
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

A pISp>lCH from Berlin says The entire press congraiula,es Prince Bis marck on the twentieth anniversary of his entrance into the prussian Ministry. The opposition journals. while condemning Prince Bismarck's home policy. warmly refer 10 the services he has rendered the nate. It IS right ie have political re- sevation. Congratulate him bu, con- demn his home policy. Like the gray haired story of the Irishman who. when d bull had made an intellectual attempt 10 but, railroad engine from a bridge. re- marked that he gloried in his spunk bu, damned his judgment
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
A TERRIBLE NIGHT.

The most terrible nigh, ever spen, was on account of quinine," said Dr. Blossman. well known Arkansaw physi- clan.
 How did quinine bring so terrible a night ?" asked gentleman. one of the company which the doctor was entertain ing.
 During the recen, grea, floods" said
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01
A< en,erprising citizen. after repeated

endeavors to remove eolored church where a constant revival was held 10 the great annoyance of the people. purchased an adjoining To, and e9ablisheda . slaugh- fer house and soap factory. Alter the establishment, was well under operation. the eolored preacher was heard 10 remark as he lei, ;he church "Na>. we'se much obleesed ter de gen 'lnan fur s,ar,in de ..,,,a,..
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

Taf louisville .irsps has go, :a;o 3 cen ;-ovcr.s with man bs the name oi Johnson on the question whether II is the thunder or he lightning that kills The .fy<.s takes the bold stand that II IS the lighin.ng. in oppos,- ton to MT. Johnson, claim for thunder ( lt-; ;eA!H.i SEs.
 The .4ygns is correct. l. is the light ming ,ha, kills. \ man may ba,he his brow in thunder. but wher. he begins to associate wi,h lightning either chained or foot loose. his days are numbered by a broad red mark.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

AND still the Tennessee canvass for governor goes on. At first II was feared that somebody would say something about the state deb; and fraudulent bonds but up to this time nothing has been said. After awhile. if this cruel silence is main tained. people outside of Tennessee will forget that the state ever had debt.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

Til old tmc saddle horse. cn uhi, h oonsTessmen ard governors used to t!de to school has been taken 10 the bone yard. onc peoulia'i,y abou; the old stra sht-ne ked animal Mi. his intense fondness for biting a; people When the children went OH ,o play and climbed around the ash hopper. the cid horse came along. reached over the fence and took a mouthful of cloth from the seat o: boy pantaioons. He had way. too. of blowing his nose in your face and tramping on you. When you wen; to girt saddle. he d reach around with a suddenness that knows no warning. and take patch out of your sleeve. bu, when you went to ungiu the saddle. you could pull him all you were amnd to and the placldi,y of his countenance would not undergo the slightest change
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

tisl million copies of Col. Donan $ Fourth If July ora,lon have been ordered pnn5ea v the enierprising managers oi rAil.f5..e. n Dakota. Aside from dong res5a.-.F newspaper work. l5onan has made Il natsagal reputation .Is m orator. and sisl = eafoys lie
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

AN Arkansaw exchange says that sti.l houses are giving way to school houses. ', ~is 'he sis.ng a~., "s >e'''"g ,o school houses iha, caused the three mile law. Bui then nearly any en.erP-isins school ,eache. would walk three miles for a drink
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

kENiCoki far. are offering a pre- ,niun for the bes; chewing gum. This shows spin, of progression and will no doa5; e>6ite much rivalry among young ildits. l, IS no, stated ye, whether or not there will be A premium for the most unsIgh;ly mouth
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

EaE present cotton crop of Arkan,a~, if inc ea,her continues warm for few weeks .ongef. will be inc l1rges, ever pro- drced T the state. The acreage Is larger than e.ei before. and the season has been or unprecedented favor.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1882-10-01

THE woman's rights suffrage oonven- ton. which recently me; in Omaha. es- tablished one fact-that women have right 10 meet and adjourn