The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1882-10-15
Mrs. SuOODcusIyke
UAsAN ATTACK OF BILIOUS collie, AND HEi
uusBANp AS USUAL BECOMES fLusTERED.

HAS An ATTACK OF BILIOUS 'oIio, AND HEN
HUSBAND AS USUAL BECOMES FLusTERED.
ooh. dear!" grunted Mrs. Spooper-
dyke. PPM sure I'm going TO die! and
the good woman Hoped over in the bed
and contemplated her husband with pale
face and a look Of general debility. Il" You
viii be good to baby, won't you, dear
"Gh. no." returned Mr.. Spoopcndyke,
pounding her tenderly on the head WITH
his big hand. "You'rc all right. Bear up
against it. and you'll be well in an hour or
1.-TWO. have often had the cholera-morb'Is,
but you never see me give up like ihls.
Where's the gingerl'
81 don't know" moaned Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke. =. Look on the top shelf OF the closet
II it isn't there, try the bottom drawer OF
the wardrobe; or it may be in the pantry
Ow-wl" and Mrs. Spoopcndykc doubled
up and Strengthened out with jerk.
"You can't remember any other con-
gressOnal district represented 10y that gln-
Ger can you?" growled Mr.. SpOopcndyke,
prowling around the room IN I'M almleSS
int energetic fashion. "YOu don't call To
mind "A couple Of more roOsting-placcS in
which that ginger j. to be found. do Won
Where bouts on the top shelf" and Mr..
Spoopendyke ratified around among the
Iod bottles and empty pil-bOXeS. "Looh
there! I've found that collrt-plastcr | want
ed day before Yesterday !" and more than
gratificd with his find Mr.. Sp0Opcndykc
utterly forgot the original object Of his
search
"You'll send baby TO Il good school. and
see that she marric> happily, dear? "
groancd Mrs. Spoopcndy he, adapting Il
womnn's style Of limiting that the ginger
would unacceptable. "And you'll bury ne
by mothcr?'
"Ccrtainly," replied Mr.. Spoopcndykc
Immersed in the contemplation OF HE court
plaster. Where's the sheet Of flesh color
THAT was here" he demanded. II don't
seem to detect the presence OF that parlcu-
lar element Of adhcsiycncSS. Where's the
hesh-colOrcd portion Of this curative -"
and sir. SpoOpcndykr ran over the little
SQUARES again in vain search for The piece
he ms scd.
Ibid Won look in the wardrobe, love-"
llskcd Mrs. Spoopcndykc family.
at isn't hcrc!" growlch Mr.. Sp0opcm-
dyke, raking over the contents Of the
drawer. and turning them over with hi>
foot. What? Upon my word you're
la pretty woman! thought you said that
old razor-Strap Of NINE was lost when we
moved. Here il is as biz rs life and twice
as dirty. Glad found that strap mum
bIed Mr.. Spoopendyke, rubbing it tender
" and blowing of the dust. "GOt piece
OF clOth?"
"Oh, do look in the pantry " pleaded
Mrs. Spoopendyke. "fm sure its in the
lpantry!"
Mr.. Spoopcndykc charged on the pantry
like a column OF horse and hustled around
and bumped his head, but didn't seem TO
meet with much success.
81 didn't see any," he mutercd. Don't
YOU know where you keep your cloth! /
ls'posc | might stand around here till
dOOmSday, while the moths corrOdc and
thieves do break into this razor-strap and
steal the whole business, without finding
piece OF cloth to wipe it on. Haven't you
got IN old skirt or something's" And Mr..
lSpOOpendykc drew the strap under his
arm two or three times and regarded it ai-
lfectionatcly.
ooh, please find the gingcrl" squcaled
Mrs. SpOopendyke, as another >pa,m
caught her. "Neyer mind your old strap!
Find the ginger!"
CANT looking for it," rctortcd Mr..
lSpoopendykc. Here's cork. and the
\ bottle can't be far OIL When find that
bottle I'll have clue to the ginger, and
I'm goin. 10 follow it To the bitter end.
You ought 10 save these cOrks anyway
when go fishing. What kind Of look
mg bottle was il?
1t was long and narrow" replied Mrs.
SpOopendykc, almost in despair.
~ ought To find it from that dcscrip-
ton" muttcred Mr.. Spoopcndykc. Most
bottles are perfectly round. Here's the
arnica bottle upside down. and told YOU
to keep it filled. might knock my elbow
into the next Presbyterian General ASSEM-
10y. and I'd have To wait all day before |
could get a drOp Of arnica 10 SoOthc my
anguish! What's this straw-hat OF mine
doing i'll the bOitc-boX, anyhow: What
particular malady did this hat have that
suggested such disposition Of it, And
Mr.. Spoopendyke SmoOthed out the crown
and Squinted with one eye while he
Strengthened the brlm. "That's GOOD
hat yet, and he put il ON, and regarded
himself in the glass. You wanted some
ginger, didn't your Where is it Where'd
you put it,"
| Mrs. Spoopendyke rose from the bed,
pale but firm, and, stalking across the room.
seized the bottle and llounccd back into the
bed with bump that showed she was mad
There is nothing on earth that will 80 en-
L 4
among the sheets.
"Gelting better. amt YEP" snortcd Mr..
Spoopendyke. ~ told We that cholera
morbus didn't last long. Where's the ra-
zor-strapI What'd We do with that strap
Mrs. SpOOpendy he eyed him but made no
response.
"POint out to me the present address Of
that strap" howled Mr.. Spoopendykc.
"Take this finger and lay ii tcnderly on the
home and country OF that strapi" and MIR.
| Spoopendyke whirled around like grind
| stone and filled the air with bottles and
boxes. and powders and pills. Come ont
OF the jungle and face mel" yelled Mr..
Spoopendyke, apostrophlzing the strap,
which he remembered having in his hand
but moment before. "ShOw me to the
strap! Take that strap by the ear and lead
1t before spoopendyke in proper person !"
and the cnragcd gentleman thrust his foot
through the crown Of his hat and drew the
wreck up TO his hip.
whats that sticking out Of your breast
pocket" asked Mrs. Spoopendyke, scrap
ing off external applications Of AN assort- |
ment Of drugs.
"Umphl" grnnted Mr.. Spoopendyke.
drawing out the strap. Found il, didn't |
We? Another time you let things alone, |
will YEP Made me spoil my straw hat with |
your nonsense! Another time you want |
anything you just stand back and let me !
search! Y understand :"
"Yes, dear" murmured Mrs. Spoken
dyke, and as her husband left the room she |
took consoling swig at the ginger bottle
and reflected that he hadn't enjoyed the at
tack OF cholera-morbus much more than she
had Brooklyn Eagle.