The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-01-13
t,o;p to my coal man. I'll eat himr'

tacip to my coal man. I'll eat himr'
says1.
THAT man. says Minty, sis the rich
est man in New England! / knew him
the minute / see his face"
20, wall, if he's so awful rich, I'm
glad ont says I, ''bein's he won't new
er miss this money he gin me, and it'll
be quite fortin' to my coal man. ~
saysI
SoIwalked on, tryin' to feels bold as q
lion; but I didn't felt like deth; and
guess Minty knew it. for she never said
another word about it.
After this, / KEEP pooty quiet for awhile
only ran into peanut stand one day
and had ter pay dollar and half dam
ages; and once chased coal cart till
was clean beat out, and had to hire a
coach to kerry me home.
But the wost on t was, / was gittin'
all discouraged, and I was willin'
to own at last that I had got the
monomanier, or a touch ont any
way; and finally, l consented to let 'em
call in a doctor.
He said how tiny sistim needed tonin'
up, and he left me some medicine. ]
took the medicine faithful; but l knew,
and Minty knew, too, that couldn't
never git toned up right, till l found that
pesky coal man.
Our advertisin' didn't amount to
shucks. A few smutty-faced, lynn fell
lows called on us, expectin' to make
oov,,o<I;n3 ont nm - 7 csnoso. h,,t xuo
want SO easy took in, and they went
away as poor as they come.
One day, Minty showed in q young
Irishman. He come bowin' and scrapin'
up to the table, where 1 sot sewin' threw
down his old hat and put out his black
paw with flourish, as if he was ickled
to death to see me.
s.By my sowl," says he, s.if it isn't the
identikle old lady, herself, now! knew
We as quick set my two eyes on ye!''
singular says l, cOors could be
for I'd got used to 'em, you know.
singular, but l never see you afore, :"
says I.
20, now" says he, coaxin' like-'.ye
wouldn't forgit so aisy. Think, now,
how would it be, say, barrin' the baird,
and the short cut O. me hair, for the hot
weatherr' says he.
''Barrin' as much as yer mind to, :"
says I, II don't know We and l don't
wanter," says 1; ''and now if you'll stop
your blarney and tell me what ye want,
I'll be obliged to ye.''
He looked all struck of heap for a
minute, and then says he, Didn't yer
advertise for the young man as driv We
ter the depot on his coal cart last Christ
mas?''
II did," saysI.
s:And isn't it meself as is the very fell
ler?'' says he, slappin' his knee, and
lookin' up as bold as brass, agin.
'"Now / think ont, dunno but ye
be-" says 1. eyes, l guess you be the
very Teller; and so 'spose you've come
to pay over that five dollars lent you,"
says 1, and riz up and hid out my hand
to Aim.
You 'orter seen that man; he looked
all ways to once. and everywhere, but to
me; then he picked up his old hat, and
says he:
'.It's mistaken am now entirely! It's
not meself at all. Imane, it's not your-
self at all.''
20 yes, it isl says 1, "it's myself but
it amt yowself" So sayin' 1 opened the
door, and he went out in a hurry.
And this was only one of quite num-
Der O. experiences we went through, and
all for nothin'. No great wonder I had
the monomanier, was it? 1t was mercy
that Minty didn't get it fastened on to
her, too. 1 guess she did come dretful
nigh it.
But there's an end o some kind to all
things; and there's an end ter this story,
as you'll see, if you wait till l git
through.
One morning Minty came to me after
breakfast, and says she, ''Aunt Ruth,
Jack is goin' ter be away few days, and
you and nell give party; q coal mans
party" says she. ''We'll advertise in
every way we can for two days, and on
Thursday we'll hold the recepshun in
our basement. Well have lemonaid
and donuts and SANDWICHES enough for
all the coal men in town. What do YOU
think on't?'' says she,
l hid my breth's much as mint, I
was so struck with the idea.
'.Minty, it's jest the thing" says I.
''You are genius"
So we set right about it. 1t was awful
hot weather, and it stood to reason that
no hard workin' coal man would miss a
chance O. gittin' good lunch and a cool
drink O. lemonaid, free, for nothin'
That must fetch him." thinks l, and l
felt encouraged.
The advertisement run this way:
Free lunch to Coal Men! At No. So
Clay Street (basement). from eleven a.
m. to one o'clock. Come one, Come
allr'
asked Minty what she s'posed the
neighbors would think, when they see
~, lr:nSe