davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

An American walking through a town Tn Wales saw procession with flags flying, trumpets blowing, and a man hoisted shoulder high, and asked, "What is all this about?" "Why, that is the pig man." was the reply. A little while and he met a similar procession, and another man uplifted. "What is up now?" "Oh, that is the anti-pig man." There was an elect ion fight over the question whether some pig-styes were to be removed. The styes carried the day.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
SAMPLE BOTTLE FREE
Notice.

TTNO J. D. KINNEAR-Y0U ARE HEREBY l notified that we have expended one hundred dollars in labor and Improvements upon the Me- zart mine, of gold bearing ore, situate in the Dos Cabezas Mining District, about two miles north east of Ewel Springs, Tn order to hold said prem ses under the provisions of ections 2324 and 2325 of the Revised Statutes of the United States, and the act Congressa, approved January 2d, 1887, mendatory thereof; said sum being the amount required to hold the said mine for the year ending 1880. Now, if within ninety days from the publication of this notice you fail CT refuse to contribute your proportion of such ex penditure> az a coowner, your interest in said claim will become the property of the subscribers under the sections of the revised statutes afore mentioned. JOHN MCGREGOR
 WILLIAM FOWLER.
 Dos Cabezas, Cochise County, A. T.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

-"Don't you think I have a good face for the stage?" asked young lady with histrlonic aspirations. "I don't know about the stage," replied her gallant companion, "but you have lovely face for 'bus?" Y. Commercial Advertiser
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

-"l tell yer wot, boys," exclaimed old Ben, the toughest man in the camp; "l tell yer wot, boys, it made a feller feel kinder watery round the lids to hear that little chit of a thing settin' up thar like an angel a.sayin' her prayers so cute, Mary had a little lamb,' or sunuhin' CT thet sort" !"
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
.yon Grand Contradtc.ci cion,

A French gentleman recently from Paris was invited by one of our popular citizens to indulge in the "American custom" at the Exchange. Not knowing our "colloquial Ameri- can" well enough to call for mixed drink, it was suggested that he take "brandy punch,' which he did. Tho next morning he called alone at the bar, and being asked by the polite young man who concocts cocktails what he would have, and having forgotten the name of the drink of yesterday; he replied: "l will take one grand contradic-cion-- what do you call it?-wis very much lemon to make him sour, very much soogare for make him sweet, plenty of brandy to make him strong, and a great deal of wasser to make him weak" "Oh, yes, Iknow," returned the barkeeper, "you want punch. " ''Yeez, zat ees eet; von punch"
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
Assessment Notice.

TINO JAMES LOWRIE, W. P. CONLIN AND Il E. S ROSS, their heirs or assigns. You are hereby notiied that the undersigned has expended the full sum of one hundred dollars (S100) upon the Chamberton mine, being the assessment work required by law, for the purpose of holding said premises for the year ending December 31, 1881. pay to me the sum of twenty-five dollars, being the proportion of each as equal owners, within ninety days from the first publication of this notice, your interest or t1e interest ef tne one law. Said mine is situated in the Tevis Mining District, on the North slope of the Dos Csbezas range of mountains.
 VIM. L. MARTIN. Dated July 9:h, 1882. jy15 3m
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

Not long since three jovial drum mers came together, and as they were all going to neighboring rural town, one of them Henry Pead, of St. Louis, proposed that they should hire a conveyance and travel in company, which was agreed to. All went me.rily as marriage bell til, toward evening, when they were overtaken by severe storm, and sought shelter in neighboring farm house. They were hosp'tably en- tertained, but all three had to sleep in one bed. Next morning the hostess, a kind hearted elderly matron, inquired how they had rested. "Oh, very well, thank you," replied one; "Gaorge slept next the wall, l slept on the outside, and Henry Pead in the middle" "Did he!' exclaimed the old lady in astonish- ment.
 It is respectfully suggested to the Methodist brotherhood that, in lieu of the six months probation required of converts before accepting them into full fellowship, the awakened ones be simply required to play one or two games of croquet. If they come cut of the ordeal with unruffled temper, with DO naughty words upon their lips and DO murder in their hearts, then they can safely be taken into the church as marvels of grace. This is not only much quicker meth cd than the old one, but it is also vast ly more trustworthy. It is sure test.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

The "digitated hose," which is early English for stockings with separate tenements for each toe, will, it is said, give the foot better play, be more eleanly than the present style of stockings, and allow the phalanges of the foot greater freedom of action. In the face of the fact that not one man Tn ten is aware of the presence of "phalanges" in his foot, we protest. If the idea that the phalanges are going to move with the greater freedom gets into the heads of the elderly gentlemen with marriageable daughters the demand for this new tangled stock. ings will be far in excess of the supply. In such cases we thank fate that we are no longer young.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
The Great English Remedy

Is q never failing cure Tor Nervous Debility, Exhausted Vitality, SeminaI w kness, Spermet aran e, Lost ManhoC d, Impot oncy, Paralysis, and all the ter riblc effects oi SCH abuse youthful follies and ex- cesses in mature years Such as Loss or Memory, Lassitude, noctural em- issions, aScrsions 10 so-
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
\ Close Call for BramIey.
Evansville Argus.


 The people of little town in Warrick county have been hanging right over the brink of church scan- dal, but are not aware of the fact, nor will they be until this copy of the Argus reaches its readers over there. Just before the close of the services last Sunday good brother walked forward to the pulpit, handed the minister an announcement, as he thought, and asked him to read it to the congregation before he dismissed them. Just before time was called on the Doxology the minister said: "Brother Bramley has handed in the following" and in clear voice he read the note, which ran as follows:
 My OWN PET BRAN: Are you never coming to see me again? l am dying to see my darling once more and gaze into his beloved eyes. The old mummy that calls herself your wife will never find it out. How can you endure her? Come darling, Co one who truly loves you. Your own and only MARY.
 The good brother had handed in the wrong announcement. At the close of the reading the minister looked horror. struck, the congrega- ton stared at Bramley with cold, hard stares, and his wife rose up in ter seat and stared at him like 4 tigress. he was equal to the oc. cassion, however, ana rising calmly with look of perfect resignation on his face, he said "Brothers and Sisters: It may appear strange 10 you that should ask our beloved pastor to read sucl, terrible thlng AS that from the pulpit, but the best way to fight the devil is to fight him bodily face to face. The writer of that vile note is unknown to me, hut is evidently some depraved child of sin who is endeavoring to besmirch my Christian reputation. 1 shall use every ondeavor to ferret out the writer, and, if discovered, will fear. lessly proclaim her name and hold her up to'the contempt of all good Christian people," He sat down amid murmurs of aprobation and sympathy.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

Ina breach of promise suit in Montana, the plaintiff said that the defendant had failed to appear at the time agreed upon for the ceremony. He afterwards came to the house, but, she being angry, sat the dogs on him. The Judge asked the defend any why he had not appeared. "Well, Judge," was the reply, "I was treed by bear all day and night, and couldn't possibly get away in time." The case was dis. missed, and in few minutes the contestants were husband and wife.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
First National Gold Bank,
 OF SAN FRANCISCO. CAL. Paid Up Capital, &I, I,50O.OOO. Gold.

Exchange on principal cities of the United States, Great Britain, Ireland and the Continent, bouget and sold.
 Commercial credits issued available in China, Japan and Europe.
 Collections made and prompt returns rendered at market rates of exchange
 Accounts solicited from Individuals, Firms, Banks and Brokers. n7tf
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29

EOR A QUARTER OF A CENTURY OR H more Hostetter's Stomach Bitters has been the reigning specific for indigestion, dyspepsia, fever and ague a loss of physical stamina, liver complaint and other disorders, and has been most emphatically indorsed by medical men as health and strength restorative. It counteracts ten dency to premature decay and sustains and com forts the aged and inirm. For sale by all drug gists and dealers generally.
Tombstone weekly epitaph., 1882-07-29
Summons.

o. o. TRANTUM, Plaintiffs Attorne.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01

cool off. The Mayor further adorned
them with fine.
The selection "RepOse in Death" BY
the COncOrdia was excellently rendered
The flower girls in their dresses of
white looked the picture of innocence
Their singing was cOmmendable.
The procession and its attendant
"scatteTings" made several thousand
people who went to the cemetery.
The lady with the open umbrella was
very prevalent in front of the speakers
carriage. She should be suppressed.
The Cadets and Drum Corps appeared
we'll in the line of march, as also did
the French Society with their tri-cOlOred
flag.
The reporters thanks are rendered to
Post Commander CARRIER and Mr.. A. L.
McCutcheOn for cOurtesies shown him
during the day.
The graves of soldiers, whose remains
rest in other than the City Cemetery
were decorated i'll the forenoon by special
detailed committees.
The street fakir and the hand-Organ
woman We'd with the peanut vender, in
making people believe that it was cir
Gus day, or the glorious Fourth.
One of the "vets" was attired in a
sailor hat and open collar shirt, with
the old time hOTn-handled eating knife
buckled on his right side, la bowie.
Lieutenant Governor Richards wore a
buttOn-hOle bOquet on his left coat
lapel and read his speech from manu-
script; He Is a fluent speaker and was
greatly appreciated by his listeners.
Notwithstanding the crowded con-
dltlOn of the city, things were remark
ably quiet in police circles. An average
Council meeting usually creates more
excitement among the tinger-snappers.
An excellent opportunity was given
our citizens and the visitors, of person.
ally testing the wTetched plank side
walks that lead to the cemetery. The
holes and upturned planks were fully
appreciated, judging from the eXclama-
tlons that tlOated on the air from time
tO~time.
Why are the remains of Nicholas Mark
ert allowed to rest in the poor" lot?
Several members of the Post say that he
left little money at his death, sufi i.
cient to buy him burial place, and,
even If he did Lot, he should rest in the
soldiers grounds. "Nick" will be re-
membered as the old man who used to
go around the country buying chickens
and dealing in all sorts of odds and
ends.
The Governors address was rather
long, and some of the audience became
tired. One lady, rather short i'll stature,
who had become tired of resting on one
toe, remarked with a sigh of relief,
toward the close, 'Ah! he has only three
more pages to read, thank goodness" "
The urbane Governor had been passing
his sheets, when read, to Mr.. j. B. Nc
Crea, who deposited them in some un-
known place in the carriage. The little
lady's expressed thought was the un-
spoken sentiment of many others.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
EXTRA COMPENSATION.
Why Should the Health Ofcer Receive
Indemnity Money?

Why Should the Health Officer Receive
Indemnity Money?
The ordinance fixes the compensation
of the Health Officer at 1715 cents an
hour while on duty, and just how DR..
Smith expects to get in his three dollars a
day extra compensation work, is mys-
terry. What business has the aforesaid
health officer to prOwl around smallpox
houses anyhow, when the city was pay
ing SO day for each house infected, to
the City Physician whose duty it was to
see to them. Section 3, in the ordinance
says that "the Board of Health shall ap-
point Health Officer, define his duties,
and pay him, not to exceed 81 75 day,
while on actual duty" and it don't say
that because he buried one or more
smallpox patients, at dead of night, at
tariff of fifty dollars head (while they
only paid So at Canal FultOn) that he
shall be remunerated at the rate of So
day, until he is Officially" notified by
the Board, that smallpox no longer ex-
lists, a fact known to the city at large a
week or so before.
The city was badly scared at the time
of the disease, and right royalty has she
had to pay for it, as in the case of Mrs.
Showers, who did not have the disease
at all, but the Health Officer and one as
sistant (the other being flOored with too
much preventive medlclne) got 500 for
the job. How the sum was divided is
best known to themselves. Another
case was the extravagant bill of Lackey
family, which, large enough at first. was
made still greater by a trial, in which
the city has to pay $25 or $50 costs in
addition, for the members of the COun-
Gil prefer paying it, rather than appeal
and pay more.
Then comes the $3.50 bill now in the
hands of the Infirmary Directors for ad-
judicatiOn, part of which will have to
be paid, and the greater part, too. The
Board of Health very properly refused
to entertain the Indemnity" claim OF
the Health officer, which we published
last week, preferring to have it go over
to the June meeting, when full Board
may be present, and it is extremely
doubtful If they do anything in the mat
ter, jndging from the conversation Ot
those members who have been spoken
to about the matter.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
Congress Lake.

This popular summer resort, reached
by the COnnOttOn Railway, promises to
be fully as attractive as in former seas
Ons. The late spring has prevented fix
ing up the grounds, but few days work
will remedy all defects.
The pavilion over the lake is model
of neatness and convenience; the dane
ing hall overhead is enclosed all around
with heavy Venitian storm shutters,
affOrding perfect protection from all
kinds of weather.
A rallied foot bridge crosses the marsh
along the railroad trestle, doing away
with the dangerous walking on the ties.
Much material for the new lake steam
or is lying up there, and when titles to
property are all completed, the boat will
probably be built this season. The lake
is fully feet higher than last year and
fishing is unequalled, conductor haV-
ing pulled out 19 large bass last Sunday
in few hours. The grounds and pavil-
lion are we'll lighted with gasoline Ian
terms, equal to gas; the bowling alley is
in running order, and swings will soon
resume their places; while last, but not
least, Conductor George H. Swift, of the
COnnOttOn, takes every care of the trav-
eller and his comforts.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
The Lutheran Synod.

The Evangelical Lutheran joint Synod
of Ohio and adjacent States will convene
at the German Lutheran church in Cam
ton on Wednesday morning, at o'clock
on the 9TH inst, and will continue till
Tuesday evening of the following week.
Rev. A. Werder, of Wheeling, President
Oflthe District, will preach the SynodiesE
sermon in German on Wednesday even
ing, commencing at ~ o'clock. Ser
vices will also be held on Friday even
ing in German, Rev. Otto Van Sech of
BenwOOd, W. Va, officiating. COmmun-
ion services on Sunday, and preparatory
discourse by Rev. G. Butz, OfZeiienOpIe,
Butler county, Pa. Sermon for Sunday
morning by Rev. Schiedt, of Allegheny;
English sermon Sunday morning by
Prof NJ. 10y, of Columbus, President of
Synod and President of Faculty of the
Institutions. Sunday evening service
in English at ~, sermon by Rev. E.
CrOnenwett, of Butler, Pa. Farewell
sermon Monday evening in German by
Father Becker, of LOrdstOwn, Ohio.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
The German Lutheran Church

The German Lutheran church edifice
on East Tuscarawas street, in our city,
Rev. Feldman, pastor of the cOngrega-
tlon, has not been changing its coat, but
has put on an improved appearance in
side and out. Under the artistic hands
of Mr.. Charles Werner, of the firm of
Werner Bros, the outer surface has re-
ceived a good coat of red and been PEN
cilled with white stripes, all in the good
old fashioned way, thus relieving the
eye of the observer. The passerby on
the thOroughfare in front cannot fail to
note the greatly improved appearance
of the edihce. The improvement inside,
however, is even greater, as visit will
show. The ceiling is done up neatly
and artistically with sky blue, purple
and pearl, in style by no means gaudy
though rich and pleasant to the eye
The walls show a fine light drab that
suits well to the general appearance
Above each window is a gothic drawing
with corona, thus relieving the eye
The alcOve back of the pulpit is also ar,
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01

during the afternoon and evening. A
regular bus line will run daily on and
after June 1st.
Don't fail to see the bargains in sam
pie shoes and slippers at w. j. Watkins,
corner South Market and Eighth streets.
Great bargains in clothing at Sam
Gunzberg's auction sale, at the Red
Front Clothing House on the Public
Square.
Dick" Weber is home again from his
sOjOurn in the bOundless West, and says
that he will vote here next fall, not hav-
ing lost his residence, as he prefers
Canton as an abiding place. Dick para
lyzes the boys with the story of his ad-
ventures "by field and flood" in that
muscular country, and enlarges espee-
tally on the extra quality of the western
lager beer product, and its soothing eff
feet in allOpathic doses.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
A MUSICAL BANQUET.
The Grand Army Band Concert in the
Opera House.

Opera House.
'And the night shall be filed with music
And Joys succeed to the day
While cares fold their tents like the Arab,
And as silently steal away"
Last Friday night this talented musi-
cal organization gave their annual feast
of instrumental and orchestral music to
critical audience, who filled the body of
the Opera House to its utmost capacity.
The full number of twenty-five pieces
appeared on the stage. The concert be-
gan at 1925 and opened with an overture
from ROssini's "Semiramide," difficult
piece but admirably rendered. Follow
ing this, Mr.. Chas. Fiala, the leader,
with G. A. Band accompaniment, charm
ingly performed cOrnet solo, showing
| wonderful finger power, in key manip-
ulatiOn. Mr.. A. j. Kessler, in his clar-
iOnet theme and variations, was superb
and received well-merited applause,
which he acknowledged with a modest
bow. The violin had life and sweet at
tune under the deft bow of the artist,
Mr.. Charles Klein, who received an en-
core. The selections from the opera of
Patience" by the Band, was a spark
ling gem in the musical repertoire. The
violin solo, LA File du Regiment" by
DR.. f. W. Schooner, showed the finish
ed musician, and received cordial plaud-
its; indeed the softer string music ap-
peared to be enjoyed by the audience
with much the same degree of pleasure
that dessert is appreciated after the
more solid cOmestibles have been remOv-
ed. Mr.. W. H. Schilling hammered har-
mOny out of the XylOphone, and ap-
plause from the audience at one and the
same time. Selections from LA Mas
cOtte," by the Band, closed the evening.
The entire programme was faithfully
carried out, with striking fidelity to
musical rules and gave unbounded
pleasure to the listeners. The new in
struments and the members are mutu-
al credit to each other. The "yelp' of a
little stray dog who was seeking its
master ON the stage, put the audience in
good humor near the end of the per-
fOrmance, which was trifle too long,
for many, who left before its close. The
leaders baton ceased waving at 1850.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
The CiCar Makers, situation.

The demand for increased wages made
by the striking cigar makers, as report
ed last week is being complied with by
advance. Mr.. VIM. VOlkmann accedeed
to the new terms on Tuesday, and thus
followed in the wake of other packers
who had done so before him. Mr.. g. A.
Schraishuhn is doing his own work at
present, with the assistance of his two
sons, and says when he wants help he
will hire some at the going prices, but
he is not in hurry. Mr.. Dan Talbert
expressed surprise that Mr.. VOlkmann
yielded so soon, and says that he can get
along very comfortably for the present
with the stock he has on hand. Prac-
tically, the strike isended and the work
men have secured the victory.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
Sunday School Anniversary.

Next Sunday is "Childrens' Day"
throughout the United Brethren Church.
1t is the birthday anniversary of Phillip
Otterbein, the founder of that church,
and will be observed by the U. B. con-
gregatiOn and Sabbath School of this
city next Sunday evening. A good pro-
gramme, consisting of song, bible
reading on children, an address, and a
contribution for the general fund, has
been prepared by the Sunday School
Board of the church. An interesting
time is expected and the public are
heartily invited to attend.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
The Pioneer Meeting.

The Executive Committee of the Stark
County Pioneer Association desire tO
have it understood that the grounds on
the day of the picnic are open to the
public, whether members of the AssOci-
alton or not. The intention is to make
the exercises interesting to all classes,
especially the young, who are interested
in knowing how their fOrefathers lived,
bled and died. The small admittance
fee of ten cents will be charged to men
only, to meet incidental expenses of
printing programme, fitting up grounds,
&c. No charge for the admission of fe-
males nor vehicles. Remember the day,
Wednesday, June 14th, and make the Oe-
casiOn pleasant reunion.
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01
WaYnesburg MInnowInps.

Farmers think it is too wet for corn
planting.
We had grand surprise and birthday
party on May 25th at the residence of
Mrs. Barbara Wagner, in Rose town
ship, being her 18th birthday. A capi-
tai dinner was served, followed by social
conversation and music. Messrs. Daniel
and Watkins Little and Miss Lucy WagO-
ner, on violin and accordion, furnished
the latter. Her children were all present
but three, Mrs. Fred Halter, of Conway,
Ark, Matthias Wagner, of Minnesota,
and Frank Wagner, who is in the
Black Hills,
The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1882-06-01

The Grand Army Band, who went to
Salem on Decoration Day, met with a
good reception. The Salem people did
their utmost to provide for their comfort
and, upon returning, the Ft. Wayne Of
ficials provided special train for their
return to Canton, where they arrived
at 1 o'clock, on Wednesday morning.
W. B. Devices, one of our merchants, who
of the Salemites on Decoration Day were
all that could be desired; that the ap-
pearance of the flower girls was very
fine, and he became quite enthusiastic
in his description of what he had seen
in the capital seat of our neighbOring
county.