The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1882-11-09
r.,rAsANTRxss.

PLEASANTRxE0.
wHf are pretty girls like Wild char
RESP Because they make you pucker
up your lips.
Why is the discovery of the North
pole like an illicit whisky mandatory ?
Because it is secret still.
DIR. HOLLAND wrote, "There's song
in the air." Investigation would have
shown him that the air was in the song.
A oYS1o says he agrees with Longfel-
low that ''life is not an empty dream" "
IT is a full dream, pretty much all night
mare.
"Too MUCH absorbed in his bust
ness" was the comment of q Western
newspaper on the death Of brewer
who wassdrowncd in tank of his own
beer.
al WANT one of those long felt hats,
papa, said pret y girl to her father.
The indulgcnt father forked over the
money, and her head now fills the long
felt want.
SCIENTISTS say the best brain food is
corn meal; so, if you wish to fatter
scientist by some delicate af1usion to his
mental capacity, all you have to do is
10 call him ,oush. head-then run.
MASTER TOMMY (returning from the
funeral)--" Why did Uncle Jonas cry SO
for, aunt? He cried more than any
body!" Aunt (grimly)-"Of course {!
Most Of the llopaty is left to him, my
dear."
"Wn!r is mean time? asks a CORE
tpoude't. Going to picnic alone and
hceing your first and second-best girls
VITA two fellows you hate, is about as
nearly cur idea OF mean time as pen
can express. Bardette.
b. SAID The night Waterman, when about
Il 2si he was invited to drink cup of
g Zee: 'No, thank you; coffee keeps
awake all night" Then he saw his
'lunder, looked very much embarrassed
and tried to explain it. But it was no
use.
"WHAT time is it, my dear?" asked
wife OF her husband, whom she sus-
pected Of being drunk, but who was do
ing his best to look sober. "Well, my
darling, l can't tell, cause, you see,
tbFe alc two hands on my watch, and
each points to different figure and I
don't know which to believe"
THE boys had met in the barn, the day
Was big to them with fate,
For whether or not to - hockey play
Vas the subject of debate.
Twas put to vote, the Chairman's threat
Proclaimed, " The ayes have choseu,
Bat skunk came i'll with extra vote
and gave 1t to the nose
CAPT. PERCIvAL, Cape Cod mariner
of the old school, was once awakened in
his bunk by shirmate with the an
noun2cment that the vessel was going to
eternity. "Well," replied the Captain
Give got ten friends over there to one
in this world; let her go" And he
TUNED over and went to sleep again.
AlR. MALONE Ito the apple-woman
WHO Las "sherifl's Sale displayed on
her stand" Shule, Mrs. Maginnis, it's
sol1y am Ter this throuble that's come
upon yc.' Mrs. Maginnis-"Och, well,
Nj. Malone, I dent mind telling yez,
hcoin' sc are an ould irnid. but it's only
al!ttlc business caft to get rid av nae
uuil stock. '-Hu22c,'s Ba-as.
II.-r were talking about the compar-
ative readiness Of the sexes to oblige one
another, when jones employed this il
-uztiat;oa g 4 man walking along in
the street finds cigar III his pocket,
Lut1-o match. ~ meets another man
Wish lighted c gar, stops him, asks for
a light, gets it anu goes Oh. Now, do
5lu suppose enc weblan would do that
1ur anotEer?'
CONGRESSMAN S, s. Cox in lecture
at Washington On the humor of the ne
gro race, toll tle following stor y as an
iil'atIatioa: awhile in Georgia soae
time ago ] happoned to be passing
along the STREET Huilo, Sam,' said
particularly black colored man on the
other side of lie street. 'Hullo!' I
promptly tepi!el, whereupon the Afri-
can aforesaid promptly retorted, "Cuse
me, sab, Isc dressing another cullud
man."