The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1882-08-05
dait and 9umor.
HOW Jimmy unused the Baby.


never could see the use of babies.
We have one at our house that belongs to
mother and she thinks everything of it. /
can't see anything wonderful about it.
All it can do is to cry, pull hair and kick.
It hasn't half the sense Of my dog, and
can't even chase dog. Mother and Sue
wouldn't have a dog in the house, but they
are always going ON about the baby and
saying, Ain'tit perfectly sweet
The worst thing about baby IS that you
are expected to nurse him, and then you
get scolded afterward. Folks say, Here
Jimmy Just hold the baby minute, that's
a good boy, and then say, Don't do that
NV goodness gracious, the boy win kill the
child. Hold it up straight, you good-for-
nothing wretchl'' It is pretty hard to do
your best and then be scolded for it, but
that is the way boys are treated. Perhaps
after I'm dead folks viii wish they had
done differently.
Last Saturday mother and Sue went out
to make some calls, and told me to stay
home and take care of the baby. There
was a baseball match, but what did they
care for that ? They didn't want to 60 TO
it. and so it made no difference whether |
went to it or not They said they would
be gone only little while, and if the baby
walked up / was to play with it and keep it
from CRYING and be sure not to let 1t swal-
low any pins. OF course l had to do it,
The baby was sound asleep when they went
out. I left Just for few minutes while /
went to see if there was any pie in the pam
try. IF was woman | wouldn't be so
dreadfully suspicious as to keep everything
locked up. When | got back up stairs
again the baby was awake and bowling like
he was full Of pins. SO / gave him the
first thing that came handy to keep him
quiet. 1t happened to be a bottle Of
French polish, with sponge in it on the
end Of wire, that Sue used to black her
boots, because girls are too lazy to use the
regular blacking-brush.
The baby stopped crying as soon as /
gave him the bottle, and sat down to read
the ADVOCATE. The next time look
ed at him he'd got out the sponge, and
about half Of his face was jet black This
was nice fix, for ! knew nothing could
Get the black off his face, and when mother
came home she would say the baby was
spoiled and l had done it. Nov / think
an ail-bIack baby Is ever 50 much more
stylish than an all-white baby. and when |
saw that the baby was part black, | made
up nav mind that if BACKED it ali over 1t
wonldsbe worth more than it ever had been,
and perhaps good mother would be ever 50
much pleased. So hurried Ead gave il a
coat Of black You should have seen how
that baby shined The polish dried just
az soon as It was put on, and ! had just
time to get the baby dressed again when
mother and Sue came IN
/ wouldn't lower myself to repeat their
unkind language. When you've been cali
ed a numbering little villain, aud an unnat-
ural son, il win rankle in your heart for
ages After Whist they said to me ] didn't
even seem to mind about father, but | went
MP stairs with him almost As If | was going
TO church or something that did not hurt
much.
The baby Is beautiful and shiny, though
the doctor says It win wear of in few
pears. Nobody shows ans gratitude for
All the trouble / took; and can tell you il
isn't easy 10 black baby without getting
II into lis eyes and hair. | sometimes
think that il Is hardly worth while to live
in this cold and unfeeling world.