davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22
WIT AND WISDOM.

An exchange asks: "What is Pc
tro'eumw 1t is very easy method of
getting rid of fire-kindling servants
Maratht u Independent.
"A Baltimore belle has married a
policeman. His beat was in front of
her house for over year, and she no.
ticed that he never snored.
phtG Ne1OS.
I'm 1859 eleven cars managed to
ship all the peach crop of De aware that
was sent outside OF the State by rail.
To .day it takes sixteen engines. 400 cars
and ninety-six men.
The Egyptian war will give about a
hundred photographers the emporium ty
TO say that the Bedouins are no great
sheikS, and that no matter how they are
treated they w II always be do-in some
thing atrOcious and inexcusable. War
is, indeed, great evil.-Teras Siftings
"A Chicago lady who had gone into
the country at the invitation of some
relatives, wiote TO her husband: .'Dear
Charley-When left home l forgot to
bring my slippers with me. Send them
at once" She received telegram the
next day to the following effect: Eek
press compan es cant spare the room
to transport them. Buy a new pair -
Brooklyn Eagle.
-Courage.-''Suffering sisters" ex-
claimed the speaker, energetically
shaking the hair pms from her head in
her e >citement, women will never OBJ
tam their rights until they display more
courage. Let me say to you, in the
words of famous French orator,
Courage! courage! courager" At this
stage of the proceedings somebody
threw box of caterpillars upon the
platform and the meeting broAe up in
great terror and con usIon.-N \. Post.
She said she wanted a ticket to
WyandOtte and return, an the pale,
gentlemanlv agent with the dark mus
tache, asked as he took up the paste
boar IS, ''Single?'' 1T amt any of
your business as know" she responded,
tartly. 90 might have been MARI ed a
do en- times if l d a felt like providin'
for some poor shiftless wreck OF man."
He doe n ask ladies if they want
single" tickets any more. he's afraid
to.-UetroH Post and Tribune.
"A nouveau rche had his house
robbed of several valuable pictures. He
appreciated them because they cost him
a great deal of money. and when he
made his appearance in an art-shop he
was in very excited state. II want
you to get my PICTURES for me-" he
said. ''What do you meanP" replied
the polite attendant "Whv, 1 was
robbed of them the other night, and |
come to you for satisfaction" was the
answer "But. my dear s'r, we are not
receivers of stolen goo 8. nor are we
detective Officers said the dealer.
Then" shouted the indignant million
aire. ''you had better take in your
sign. 'Oil-paintings restored. '"-Boston
Courier.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22
The Poetry Market.

A timid, but really rather pretty
young man came stepping softly into the
HdUaey sanctum Nesterday afternoon,
when NOBODY was in but the ADVERT
ment solicitor. who was writing half
column puff of Slab IL Headstone's new
marble shop. The young man took of
hat and said: "Good morning." and
the advertising man shared. ..What is
poetry vorth?" ked the timid, but
pretty young man.
ST orty cents line" said the adver-
tisement man. promptly and rather
tenderly. '.and you can't do better any
where IN America The advantages we
offer for the publication of poetry are
unsurpassed on either side of the Missis-
sippi. Our circu alton, standing in ii e
figures the first year. has steadily in
C eased three times an hour ever since,
and poetry published in this paper is
paced n the hands of 10000 families
before night. How much have you?"
Perhaps" said the timid young man.
fairly Keeling with del ght, lit is little
too long"
makes no difference" said the ad.
man, beaming upon him kindly; 1--WE Ii
put it all in if we have to issue a sup
plement. And everything over 5000
lines goes at thirty-fve cents"
The timid young man looked disap-
pointed.
1T isn't so much them" he said,
''when it's very longP'
Never" replied the ad. man, mag
unanimously. 'Never; less room, more
pay; that's the way You make your liv-
ing. Got your copy with you?"
.Yes, SIR replied the Young man.
ioyfully: s'would you like to read it, sir,
or shall / read it?'
mo. don't are to read it Just now.
Sit down and we II count it"
So they sat down and counted it.
MY heart, my hea in throhbing
numbers tells" read the ad. man.
Heart medicine. young manT" he
asked, in the patronizing way of man
who knows everything.
mo sir" repl ed the young man. in
amazed tones. while the ad. man count
ed away for dear life. mo, sir; q
rhapsody. SIR"
.Oh. yes: yes. of course" said the
ad. man in reassuring tones. Hun
dred nine, hund ten. hunl 'leven-
course, hund fourleen-hain't done
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22

murh in rhapsodies since Helmbold
fai ed-hund twent-thee good things,
though; we took gross OF 'em last
spring on Pad & Lotions column
humid for two-and I wore one myself
two weeks and it made-hund ii { -four
man of ne. One hundred and sixty
eight lines, sir, and we'll throw in
four-line head and won't count the
odd half line-$65. 20; call it an even
sos cash down. Just step down to the
business office and I'll give you re-
ceipt"
We don't know what happened i'm
med .ately after that. We only know
that when the footman opened the door
of The carriage to let us out at the mar
bic steps of the Ha,Okeye office. the al.
man was leaning ON the heavy bronze
balusters, gazing wonder ngly at the
figure of young man. walking UNI
steadily down the street, holding fut-
tering manuscript in one hand, and
into the other clasping his pa lid brow.
You may take my doub'e-e olumn
head for football, SIR" said the ad.
man. respectfully raising his hat and
standing uncovered as we assembled one
broa1 stairway, IF that young fellow
going down street isn't three-square
lunatic from GRANVILLE Wanted me
to pay him sixty-five dollars for long
rhyming puff without ne of business
In it, sir. "-Burtington Hdwkeye.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22
FACTS AND FIGURES.

The amount of buckwheat ra;sed
in most of the Western Sta es is very
small, and is generally decreasing.
Clicaqo Journal.
"A few feet of land in New York
CITY. ID by % feet. sold recently at the
rate of S15, 456, 900 per acre. This is
the hghest price ever paid for land in
this country.
NORTH Carolina has 178 varieties of
minerals, % more than any her State
can show up. There are liz varieties
of woods, and again we are in the lead.
-Rdieigh Net0S.
The Norfolk & Western Railroad
Company will pay a tax to the State of
Virginia this year of $4,000. against
S18, 900 last year This is by large odds
the heaviest tax paid to the State by any
OF its railroads.
Pa on the line of the New York, Lake
Erie & Western Road, the highest in the
word, has been completed. The bridge
is over 1850 feet long and BOZ feet high.
IN y. Sun.
Minnesota has SO. $50 square miles,
or SO, 459, 200 acres. of which 2,459, 500
acres are occupied by about 5000 lakes
ranging in extent from 100, 900 down 10
70 acres each. The State is as large as
all New England. Detroit Post.
For the week ended August 25
there was built total of 202 miles of
new railroad. making 1884 miles thus
far this year. against 3. 459 miles. report
ed at the corresponding time in 1881.
1858 miles in 1880, l, 476 miles in 1879,
1,O49 miles in 1873, LOLA miles in 1877,
1928 niles in 1876, 613 miles in 1875.
962 miles in 1874, 2.252 miles in 1873,
and 1862 miles in 1872. Chicago Jour
nal
The price of ivory is going up in
Europe at such a rate that tab .e-knives
must soon rise in price. The recent
Liverpool sales showed an increase of
prices over last year of ten to fifteen
per cent. and only thirty tons were Of
fered for sale. The top price aid was
three dollars pound for Angola and
two dollars and half pound for Nj
ger. At London seventy-two tons were
sold at greatly advanced rates. The
works at Sheffield may have to content
themselves with using Amer can ivory
for the genuine ar irle, and that supply
is not likely to fail while the co crop
is sufficient for the manufacture of cellu-
loid, or while the heads o. cattle in Tex
as keep up in number and excellence of
shank-bones. San Francisco Chronicle.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22
The Republican Party from Repub'
lican Standpoint.
The Springfield (Mass.) Republican

The Springfield (AIass.) Republican,
says:
1.-Two years ago he country raye tho Re.
publican party another chance. It secs how
that chanct has boon used. AZ sees tn party
le der'h'pg vcn q Robson and Keif r. ii
secs AN cN ravagant AMI in or mt I'M sasure I'm.
cihc cnt sCs Ion. IL secs tariff ref, rm dOdRel
81 C,yil-scrv CO Reform lIuRhed ut. IL sees
me OucnsVc and despicabls tax on Office
noldirs en orccd with new zeal. 10y thu chosen
tugleman OF he Repu Oican Congo ssmen. IL
SECS IN public money wasted by millions to
Tic Offices handed over as patron Ine TO Tho
IN 'rons and Lngqns. All this an the reput-
anlc men among tho party leaders either as
sent W. rcowct INTO silcnceF'
This Is strong indictment, and COM
ing from such source extremely sig
nihcant It is frank and fearless Re-
publican acknow edgement that all Re-
publican talk about re orm is shcerest
bosh. The party is incapable of re 'orm;
has not drop of reform blood in its
veins, never has had aud never will
have. 1t went into power twenty one
years ago on platform every plank of
which was, so TO speak, saturated with
nc orm. What professions and promis-
es they were that tloated Lincoln [, the
Presidency How the Democratic ..Au0.
can stables" were to be cleansed and
tumigated! How all the rogues were
to be punished and all the honest men
To be rewarded! What care was to be
exercised in the selection of public
servants, and how scrupulouslv
watched and guarded was to be the
expenditure of public money! How in.
dustrious and incorruptible were to be
the Republican Congresses, and how
much as Caesars wife ought to have been
every Republican officiali How the coun-
try and the world were to adm reand an
plaud the great. glorious and beneficent
change from Democratic sin to Repub-
ucan righteousness Well the history
OF twenty-one years Is be ore us. and
speaks for itself loud enough to wake
the dead. In no single department OF
Government from highest to lowest has
there been the slightest improvement.
aud there Is no department of Govern.
ment from h CHEST to lowest which has
not deteriorated IN its management iu
one way or another. The cost of Gov.
eminent has increased enormously. and
It Is well known that very large pro,
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22
Society Note.

A GOODNESS. growing out of the follow
ing conversation. has sprung up be-
tween Gilhooly and his friend. Gus De
Smith:
Il had splendid time last night"
said Gus. '.l spent the evening at a
little social gathering at the Goodman
mansion"
..Are the Goodman's nice peopleP''
queried Gilhooly.
'.Well. L should say so. They are
very aristocratic- To get in their circle
one must have either a great deal of
money or great deal of genius"
"You don { tell me so; and you say
you were there?"
Yes"
"You were invited, were you?"
''Oi course"
''And to be invited a man has to
have great deal of money or plenty of
genius?'
Precisely
"Well. Gus, I am glad to hear You
have become r CHI all of q sudden.
Lend me i've dollars ''-Teras Syssngs.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22
The Javanese "Death Valley"

Another romantic tradition has been
refuted, another thrilling illus on dis
PEELED, by DIR. Otto Kuntze's discovery
that the lethal capacities of Pakamaran,
the renowned Javanese Death Valley,
are as utterly fabulous as the Norwegian
kraaken or Richard of Gloucester s
hump. 1t is no 10 ger permitte to us
to believe that the effects of the subtle
poison given off by the "Dea lly Upas
Tree" have bestrewn that dismal va e
with countless carcasses of savage
beasts. serpents, and birds, or that a
certain death awaits any ioolhariy trav-
eler att. mpting 10 cross it; Tor the emf
nent German explorer has paid Paka-
maran an exhaustive visit, and reports
it to be as HEALTHY as any other part of
the islam |. In the way of corpses. he
did not see SO much as a dead ~ with n
its precincts. He describes it as q small
circular depression in a gorge of the
Dieng Mounta ms, about seven Iuare
meters in size, and forlorn OF vegetation.
1t is approached by two footpaths.
winding downward from the hills by
which it is surrounded. BY one of the e
paths DIR. Kun re entered the Death
Valley, despite the entreat es of his
gule es and servants, one of whom re-
peatedlv strove to hold him back bv
force. and, having traversed Pakamaran
in every direction. Quilted it by the
o her path. The natives had assured
him that he would find the valley choked
up by skeletons, as even the swiftest
birds flying above it would drop down
sione-1ea /, slain by its poisonous exha-
lations. In va n, however. dill he look
about for single bone; nor could he
detect the least unpleasant 0dor. DIR.
Kuntze pronounces Pakamaran TO be an
| imposture, the offspring of ignorance
aud superstition. Unsb.e to dispute his
sentence. we are bound. not altogether
W thout regret. TO relegate the death
eal ng vale 10 the limbo of exploded
myths. Telegraph
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22

rortion of this cost IS the result oil
/ shame ess extravag ance. culpable neg
| lect. or worse. How many rings were
the during the 81 ty years OF Demo
cratic rule? How many have there been
under Republican rule? What Democrat
ic Congress- had a Credit Mobilier scan
dial? What Democratic President patron
ized and protected a nest of whisky
tn ewes? What Demo ratio Secretary OF
War matched Belknap?-O what Demo.
cratic Secretary of the Navy matched
Robson? Was it n Demo ratio Adj
ministration that kicked out BristOw
and defended Paddock? Was it Dem
ocratic National Convention that nomi-
mated for the Presidency man who
denied under oath what was proved
upon him, and for the Vice. Pres dency
man who was dismissed from a
custom-house "for conduct preju.
dicial TO the interests of the Govern
ment?"
No wonder our Massachusetts name
sake is disguised AMI discouraged by
the principles and practices of its par
ty. 1t is rotten without and within, and
''there is no health in it." Fairly and
fully tried it has been found wanting
in every part cular. and to-day its great.
est energy is displayed in hunt ng up
some moral issue" to hide swindle,
or in crushing every honest and earnest
effort for reform. With such chiefs as
Robson and Keifer. COnkl NC, Cameron
and Logan. what is there to hope for
in the future except a record as bad as
in the past? 1t has already lived too
long for the coun'ry's good. and moth.
ing will grace its life like the ending OF
it."--St. Louis Republican.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22

The following item from the SWANS
boro ga Herald would seem to midi
cate that Southern editors have their
interruptions in the noble work OF
molding public opinion as well as their
brethren of the North: 1.-The editor
who can write leader on hot day
IN August, within fifty feet of where
stands hitched an Emanuel County
Jackass braying as though he had
sucked into his lungs all the air in three
al dining counties. will surely reap his
reward. not here below, but in thai
blessed land where there are no music.
loving donkeys to modest"
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1882-09-22

Some boys were bathing in the
Severn. in England, and when in mid
stream one was seized with cramp and
sanS, but returned to the surface twice.
His comrades endeavored to rescue hum.
and appealed to n boatman who was
rowing up the stream to assist them.
The lei Ow replied that he had some
thing else to do than pull fellows out OF
the water. and rowed on. The youth
was drowned.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08

Cheyenne, 7.-Charles A. HOyt,
the attorney who was arrested at
Phoenix, Arizona, in January last,
upon a description Of an Associated
Press dispatch, charged with the
larceny of a certificate Of deposit of
the value of $4,000, and brought
here. was discharged to-day, indict-
ment being set aside on demurrer
The latest reported from the
Crows is that cattle killing cOntin-
ues and hunting parties are destroy
ing wheat fields in northern WYOm-
ing. The report that a settler killed
three Crows lacks confirmation. II
is feared another war may be in
augurxted.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
MILL SITES VS.. TOwNSITEs:
An Important Decision By
secretary Teller.

Washington, 7.-Secretary Teller
has rendered an important decisiOrr-
reversing the opinion OF the COM
missioner of the mineral Office in
matters OF the protest of tue mill
site claimants against the issue of a
patent to the townsite claimant of
RecO, Cal. In his decision, the sec
rotary says that IN the provisions of
The statute under which the mill
site applications is made, there can
DE 90 mill site unless there is a lode
or vein to which 1t may attach. The
proof In the present case is incontrO-
yerted that mineral had been found
within the tOwnsite and on some
portions OIL the mill site. The mill
site claimant failed 10 show that
the land was Of such q character
that authorized il IS a location for
a mill site. The statute requires
that such location must be made by
the owner of lode or a quartz mill
or reduction works, and OF this there
is no proof. Although the location
certificates of IOdes were Introduced.
! there is no evidence that the lOdeS
were taken in accordance with law.
and the proof of location should
be az strong as it would be-
required in a court of law.
1t is also apparent that the lOca-
lions of mill sites were not made In
good faith, but only for the purpose
of securing land for town site pur-
poses; still, if the law had been
strictly complied with, this would
not have been sufficient grounds To-
have caused the rejection. It has
been urged that, if this tOWnsite is
not mineral land.th entry ought TO
have been cancelled. That town.
site may be located on mineral land
cannot be questioned. What are the
rights of land owners and mineral
claimants within the boundaries Of
such tOwnsite after entry, is a some
what difficult question, and all
such questions must be left
to courts Of competent juris-
| dictiOn for settlement. The de-
partment cannot, in the ma
ture of things, be called on to adj
Indicate such conflicting claims. 1t.
has been custom of the depart
ment to insert in tOWnsite patents g
reservation liz favor of mineral
rights, and in I mineral patent, a
reservation in favor of toWnsite
rights, and such reservations have
the sanction Of long practice and
the approval of courts, and ought
not now to be departed from. In
conclusion, the secretary directs the
issue of patents to the TOWNSHIP
claimants, with the addition Of this
reservation clause in favor Of min
eral rights.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
TRUSTEES SAFE.

T OOK OUT FOR THAI SALE ON
IA Saturday, the Sth instant, between
10 and IL o'clock, OF the Federal Court
House door, of that house in the Twenti-
eth Ward called the sep Sears house.
The premises contains within frse-
ton OF three lots, and from It there is q
view not to be surpassed in Salt Lake
City. The house contains twenty -oousS
With water closet and bath room.
On the premises is q stable and coach
house, and on next lot above Is tank
capable Of holding 10000 gallons OF
water. Iron piping runs through the
grounds,so that any part msy be watsreA
at pleasure. There is on the ground q
hydraulic ram, which takes water froR
City Creak and deposits it in reservoir
for house use. This place cost Sl4,750,
and must be cold, although it May NOT
bring the half Of that sam, By Lucas b.
Howard, trustee. For further paFtieE-
lars, 1ply to Wu. Howard, Fifth South
street between Fifth and Sixth East, Or
Z. o. box 334.
July 8, 1882.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
Nerve hid BRAIH DISEASES

D.R 4. G. VESTS NERVE AND lBRA1N
rTreatroenf. 4 sneoific for HystsriR, Dii,-
illness. Convulsions. Nervous Hes1ache, Men
taI Depression, Loss Ct Memory, PrenatuTs
old Age, caused by over-eLertion, oyer-nduk
gence, excuses or oVsrWorK Of TIE brain
Ooa hoy Criu Gre recent cases Each box
Contains one months treatment One dollar
\ boT- or SIX boxes for Ave dollars; seat By
mail prsDaId on receipt OF price. TIE gnarsn-
tee stx boxes 70 cure any case. Tish each
IN Tr1s led wah eve dollars, ss WI. send the
nur shRssr our written guar lgree -0 return the
money if the treatment doe not eGoCt a cure.
guarar ices issued only b. 2 - p. (. Drug
Store Salt Lake City.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08

London. THE HilIsdales intend
to enter for the Reading regatta,
July 25th. Rev. Mr.. Risley, Oxford
Beat Club umpire. at the Henley re-
gatta, in an interview, said he had
heard that nobody would consent 20
row the Hillsdales at the Marlowe
regatta on Saturday, and he believed
no one would act as umpire in case
they succeeded in making match,
their status being admittedly unsat-
isfactory. He thought no club
would accept challenge from them,
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
SPECIAL ADVERTISEMENT.
LOST.

On Wednesday, July 9Th, between
residence of 5. w. Sears. First South
street, and depot, or between depot
and residence of t. w. Ellerbeck,
seventeenth Ward, a bundle con-
tanning white skirt and pair of
slippers, worked in rosebuds. Please
leave with Mrs. B. NJ. Sears, First
South street, and be rewarded.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
mfning stocks,

New Yerk, mining stocks
were fairly active and irregular.
Robinson advanced from los to 102,
closing at Lie. State Lines No. 2
and declined to %, and o. and M.
to %. Horn Silver sold at 10; En-
pire, of Utah, S1.S5 to $1.75, and
Little Chief SIS. Sales for the day,
1855 shares.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
LATEST TELEGRAMS.
XLYII CONGRESS
REGULAR SESSION.
SENATE.

Washington, Reconsideration of
the river and harbor bill was re-
sumed, the question being upon the
Hennepin Canal project, reported by
the Senate committee.
The remainder of the afternoon
was occupied in the discussion OF
an amendment covering the ques-
tions OF practicability, constitution
atty and adviSability. Without
action the Senate wen5 into execu-
tive session and adjourned.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
There Is Hardly an AduIe
Person

Living but is sometimes troubled
with kidney difficulty, which is the
most prolific and dangerous cause Of
all disease. There is no sort Of
need to have any form of kidney or
urinary trouble if Hop Bitters are
taken occasionally.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
WANTED.

Two girls, one for kitchen work
and one as nurse, apply imme-
diately to Mrs.LOuisCohn, Twentieth
Ward, or inquire at Cohn Bros
dry goods store.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08

$45, 900 drove of real live GI2AFFES.
$50, 1000 Drove Of White AID Black
African OSTRICHES.
$29, 200 invested n school Of SEA
LIONS.
$4,000 drove of Australian KAN
GAROOS.
$4,000 two horned RHIN0CEROS, Z
feet high, weighs 1900 pounds.
$4,000 pair of TAMINOURS, from
the River Amazon.
100 Shetland PONIES.
A drove Of ELEPHANTS, all ages,
sizes and species.
The GIANT OK, larger than an ele-
plant.
$4,000 White Nile HIPPOTAMUS.
A MENAGERIE of Fifty Deus of
1000 rare and costly animals.
Fifty Male and Twenty Female Artists.
ROBERT STICKNEY, the only uni
yersal genius Of the ring.
Miss EMMA LAKE, the most tai
ented and finished Equestrienne in the
profession.
Miss MINNIE MARKS, brilliant
and bewitching Trick Rider.
JOHN LOWLOW, the funniest of
Clowns.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-07-08
FOR RENT.

A brick house of FIVE rooms, on
Seventh South street, east of
Main street; SIS per month. En-
quire of John Wayman on the prem
iSeS.