Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Anacortes, Wash. Ter.) 1882-1887, 1882-04-29
pITH AND POINT.
A LIGHT affair-A lamp.

summon.
The proper remedy for young lady
who is short Of stature is to get spliced
as soon as possible.
A WOMAN has been arrested in New
York for abducting little boy. Next
time she'll know enough to take big
one.
The Secretary of the Navy knows
something about one ship, anyhow. We
refer to courtship. He has had four
wives.
A STRANGER in st. Louis, thinking he
recognized his coat on the back of Pc
destrian, shouted, "Stop thief" and
about thirty of the inhabitants suddenly
disappeared down side street.
"WHAT would the country have been
without corporations ?" inquired Jay
Gould. "What woHld the world have
been without navigation ?" Capt. Kidd
might have asked with equal cogency.
A CLIENT says to his wine-dealer who
proposes to sell him brand of new
wine "Tel me, now, this wine is not
too heady?" Wine seller, with alacrity
=" Heady? Why it's not even wine !"
AN old bachelor, who particularly
hated literary women, asked an author
ess if she could throw any light ON kiss
ing. 81 could" said she, looking archly
at him "but think it's better in the
dark"
A scHooLBoY being set to write COM
position on the OK, after long strug-
gle, produced the following can OK
does not taste as good as an oyster, but
can draw bigger load, and run twice
us fast.
WESTERN ODE.
am waiting In the wildwood with . club.
III meet you I~ixt the gloannn3 and the dark;
IN hit you with my weapons biggest nub,
And knock you pretty much acroOs the park.
thousaad stining stars you IL soon discover,
And pyrotechnics till you cannot rest.
OH come ard .et me hit you for your mother,
Ny tmgie headed poet OF ths West
-ChialJo Tribune.
DEACON JELLY remarked to penuri-
Gus companion that the kingdom OF
Satan was to be destroyed, and asked
him if he wasn't glad of it. Eyes, he
replied, 81 suppose so, but it seems
pity to have anything wasted |"
"WnY did Gen. Washington cross the
Delaware OF the ice du,ing the storm of
ar awful night?" asked teacher of her
young class in history. 81 reckon"
piped q small voice in answer, cit was
because lie wanted to get on the other
side."
STRoNG-MINDED wife-"Eh, Jamss,
you are great on languages; what is the
difference between exported and trans
ported?" Submissive husband" Why,
my dear, if you should go to Europe you
would be exported, and I--well, I should
be transported
As THE family Of very orthodox di-
vine were gravely discussing why the
baby was SO naughty, boy of II, who
had just commenced to study the steam
engine as well as the catechism, asked,
"Papa, as we all inherit the sin of
Adam, and the baby is such little fell
low, is there not a greater pressure Of
sin to the square inch i'll the baby than in
any of the rest OF us?"
"DID you serve in the war, uncle ?"
"No, sab; was cowardly niggah. I
was Kentucky niggah. And what did
1 want to list for ?" "Were not the
white men fighting for you~ "S'pose
dey was. Dat was ne sign why we
should fight. Massa, did you ever see
two dogs tightin over bone?" "Well,
what's that to do with your fghting?'
ga heap, massa. Did you ever see de
bone fight?" The questioner left, amid
general laugh. Cleveland Leader.
A GOOD parson, who had the happy
faculty of saying kind word for every
body in whose behalf one could possibly
be said, recently otficiated at the funeral
of q farmer who was known as the mean
est and most miserly man in the neigh
borhood. Instead Of execrating the de-
ceased for his extortionate and niggard-
ly habits, this kindly disposed clergy
man simply spoke of him as "the best
arithlnetician in the country. ."-CotskiU
Recorder.
TIE wild storm still ragged furiously.
Ever and anon tho vivid lightning, in
fantastic shapes, illumined the darksome
and angry heavens. At last our young
hero, making q sudden, strategic move
ment, surrounded the band of fifteen
bowling red demons, and with no other
weapon than seven shooter, q cavalry
sword, dime novel, Remington rife,
of brass knuckles, he moved down his
pursuers like grain before the scythe Of
the reaper; then, seizing the fair Ethel
india around the waist with one arm and
plunging bayonet into the breast OF .
lusty Indian who exhibited signs OF
returning consciousness, he vaulted into
the saddle of the swiftest horse in the
Territory, and cried, in a delirium OF
triumphant joy~-"To be continued in
our next. No;7'istoWn Herald.