The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1882-04-08
A Polite Mans Dilemma.

pened last week rather goes ahead OF
anything we have heard in some
time.
Much has been said and written upon
the inconvenience to which the patrons OF
this style of vehicle are subjected yet
people continue to ride in them, and il
was through the mistaken politeness OF
a gentleman in acting as conductor
which was the cause of all his misfor-
tunes q-
Starting to go down town. he had
reached Seventeenth Street when one OF
the little three-cent cars jogging by
suggested the idea of getting aboard
instead Of walking all the way. Acting
upon this thought he hailed it, and found
on seating himself and making survey
of finances that he possessed the re-
quisite fare, three cents, "only that and
nothing more" which he proceeded to
drop into the box. So far so good.
With a sigh of relief he settled himself
in one corner of the car and prepared
for peaceful ride, there being besides
himself only one other occupant, man
deeply engrossed in reading a news
paper. Scarcely had he ridden block
when the vehicle came to a halt, and a
fair young damsel entered. Our friend,
who is gentleman of the old school,
and susceptible at all times to beauty in
any form, more particularly so when
that beauty is embodied in the person of
young lady, here arose, and bowling
politely, said: Permit me, madam,
TO pass your fare" AT the same time,
without looking at the coin given him,
dropped it into the box, and once more
seated himself. The young lady moved
uneasily, blushed little, and then,
leaning forward ventured: "That was a
ten cent piece | gave you and the fare
is only three"
Is that really so? l beg thousand
pardons. Here, driver" getting up and
hastily pushing open the door between
himself and that parsonage, al have
made a mistake and dropped ten cents
into the box in place of three. 1t be-
longed to this lady there. How can 1
get it out?'
''Get it out! You can't get it out at
all. It'll just have to stay there. You
can ride it out if you like. There aim
no other way, unless" he added, with
an unfeeling chuckle, ''you expect me
to crawl down through that hole and get
it for you"
Here the driver, overcome with his
own wit, closes the door with bang,
and clapping his sturdy self, calculates:
- A putty fellow l look, to crawl into a
ticket-boxI'
Perplexed at the situation, ANNOYED at
his own stupidity, yet outwardly all
smiling politeness, our friend here turned
saying:
90 Madame, the mistake was mine-a
very stupid one, | Acknowledgment it
is not right that you should suffer. You
will permit me to return to you the seven
cents, y at'the same time painfully con-
scious that he had not single penny
about him.
40, no; wouldn't think of such
thing. / am sorry, but it can't be helped
now"
Madame, l insist. Allow me-"
making deep and exhaustive survey
of every pocket about him in the vain
hope OF catching somewhere stray
coin. 1t is of no use; the money is not
there, and his hands not possessing that
Midas power of turning all they touch
into gold. it is not Forthcoming. Here a
feeble little voice says:
Well since you insist upon it, of
course"
q do insist upon it; l insist upon it
most emphatically."
What is to be done. Already the
great beads of perspiration stand out
upon his forehead, and every time he
opens his mouth only seems to plunge
him deeper in the mire. An idea sud-
denly strikes him, and leaning over 10
him of the newspaper. whispers in his
ear: '"Lend me seven cents, quick, to
pay the lady"
The man who all this time had given
no heed to what was passing rouses up
with start. and saying in voice dis
tinctly audible even to the horse outside.
.'SeveR cents! Bless my sonl, don't
believe have it about me-" looking up
with that dazed expression of person
whose thoughts have gone a long jour
ney.
80! beg you will not disturb your
self over such trifle. Do not borrow
IiNiOCut IL 10 NV vi JllC
est consequence.
By this time our friend had reached a
state of scarlet misery pitiable to behold
that stage in which il makes one warm
even to look at them. There is nothing
for him TO say, nothing that will not add
TO his present embarrassment, 50 he
wisely takes refuge in silence, watching
with eager interest the game OF chase in
which his fellow passenger is engaged
after the required seven cents.
All! at length it is fished out and
handed TO the young lady, and he
breathes again. But now the problem
of how to pay the man suggests itself
Here feminine wit comes to the rescue,
and the unfortunate cause of all the
trouble suggests he be paid by taking
Che fare of the next two passengers who
got in, and by that way he will be the
loser of a penny only. This plan is dis
cussed, and finally submitted to the
driver, who giving it his appreciation,
they once more settle down to wait the
unconscious liquidation of the debt.
Pretty soon they get in together, lady
and gentleman. Out of his pocket
comes the six cents and he starts for the
box. Here our friend Jumps up, and
extending his hand, takes the fare,
which, to the gentleman establishment,