The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1882-04-05
Wit and Wisdom.

Nothing is SO hard to bear as prosperity, SO
they say; but the truth is that it is other peo-
Piles prosperity which is hard to bear, not your
own.-New York Herald
Two heads are better than one-except in a
sermon.-Boston CONNIE rcial Bulletin.
Gear brings disgrace, bravery brings honor,
co,oardice saoes no man from has fate" says
the Caliph Omar but DR.. Bulls Cough Syrup
has saved millions from an awful fate.
A little boy who has been used to receiving
his elder brothers. old toys and clothes, recent
" remarked, 'sMa, will I have to marry his
widow when he dies?''-N. Y. Herald.
From Emporium
Geo. Dodge, ST., well known citizen of
Emporium, writes that one of his men (Sam
Lewis whilst working n the woods, SO severe
ly sprained his ankle that he could scarcely
get home, but after one or two applications of
THOMAS ELECTRIC On, he was able to 60 to
work next day.
When the Brooklyn Bridge is lighted by the
electric light, perhaps the taxpayers will see
where good deal of their money has gone
Lowell Courier.
Miss Sawyers Salve as 'aoao prepared beats
the world % cents.
History tells us that George Washington
never told lie; SO it is very plain that George
didn't learn to smoke while his parents were
alive-Lowell Citizen.
A New Haven minister Of the gospel told
one of his deacons that he was constantly
hearing loud sound, which kept him awake
nights. Since using DIR. Benson's Celery and
Chamomile Pills. his hearing has become nor
mall and his nerves are steady and true.
A Celtic friend was recently badly cut about
the head in an accident and bleeding freely,
but he demonstrated against having his wounds
dressed, when the surgeon told him he would
bleed to death if they were not attended to:
His reply was characteristic. "Docthur,
said he, 81 never bled to death in all me nfe
Richmond State.
Domestic the best to buy, gives the best
satisfaction. IL Elm street.
Death has just robbed New Jersey toll
gate keeper of 425-pound wife. He thought
a great deal of her, and there was a great
deal of her to think of.-Courier Journal.
how fha and
ments of medical men of the highest standing
These can be shown.
The straighter the whiskey the more crooked
the walk. This is a reel fact-The Judge.
Don't be Alarmed
at Bright's Disease, Diabetes, or any disease Of
the kidneys, liver or urinary organs, as Hop
Bitters will certainly and lastingly cure you,
and it is the only thing that will.
A gentleman viewing the st. Patrick proces-
sion in New York, overheard footman say,
"Bedad the whiskey sellers roides the horses,
but the whiskey drinkers goes a-fut. White
hall Times
n Lu6ulCluo VI Iohi AOiAt, PACoSAiooao " AA"AJ
leading physicians, and universally recon-
mended by those who have used it, as tonic
is, Browns Iron Bitters.
Candy pulls are in fashion again, but they
are now called GLUCOSE tensions. "-Philadel-
phia News.
lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound
doubtless ranks first as curative agent in all
diseases of the provocative SYSTEM degenera-
ton of the kidneys, irritation OF the bladder,
urinary calculi, &c., &c. Send to Mrs Lydia
e. Pinkham, 233 Western Avenue, Lynn,
Mass, for pamphlets.
Speaking of the jackson revival-who is to
wear the old gentleman's boots? If it is to pc
one of our Northern Democratic friends, there
must be some tall growing done betwixt this
and 1884.-Atlanta Constitution
Excessive use of alcoholic drinks cured by
Wheat Bitters, prepared by solution and not
fermentation.
Now is the witching time of year when purs
es yawn and milliners make up their bonnets.
Boston Commercial Bulletin.
Lungs convulsed by cough can be soothed
with Hale's Honey of Horehound and Tar.
Pixies Toothache Drops cure in one minute.
A wealthy kleptomaniac, arrested for steal
ing the other day, with tears in her eyes pro-
tested that she wasn't responsible, as she had
inherited theft from her father. The latter
had been an Indian gent-Phliaoeipnla
Chronicle Herald.
Congress- Yeast Powder contains no alum,