Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-01-12
aration, he was proceeding to normal

| oCteACAAOAC.
''And which Jonce and you, Nicely as
| understand, it's your desires to COM
permise this case, which have give anex-
| ity on top of anexity to you both, and
which I'm Jonce's uncle, and your'n
too as the wife o. Jonce, and proud o.
that, as Jonce Trammell know; and I'm
sixty-eight year old, goin' ON my sixty
nine; and I've knowed cases and cases
that would "a got worse and worse eff
| they hadn't a been compromised; and
which, Nicely, would ask you, as the
| party of the first part, the follerin' ques-
! ton, jes' for the film of the blanks o.
| this compromise, as it war, and which
it is, how much, or about how much,
more or less, now nigh as you can come
at it, Nicely, a woman to work not too
! rapid, but reasonable-how much weav-
in ought she to do before breakfast of
a mornin' like?''
The old gentleman made at this point
his first pause, rather, it is probable, for
momentary rest than to await Mrs.
Trammell's answer. She could but smile
at question, understanding as she did
its purport.
"Ah hal" said the good man, tri-
umphantly. "There it is. You see,
Jonce, and which I understand Nicely
to say, about half a yard; not ouer half
a yard. I'm goin', Nicely, to respect
Jonce's feelin's, and his desires, and his
anexities, and fetch you down to half
a yard day; and which, as Jonce
Trammeil's uncle, I say to him, it's
far and Reasonable consideration for
the party of the first part, and which
hain't the first idee that he won't say
so; and which now for the said party o.
the second part, and which know that,
as general thing, females don't come
in, not as quick as men, mean, and
understan' compromises, yit, as in co'se
they have got to be a consideration in
every compromise, hain't the least
idee but that Nicely Trammell, the said
party O. the first part, will agree that
the said Jonce Trammell, of the second
part, and which would say, one dram
a day; and as both the parties knows
that a compromise have to have stated
words, and not leave no loop-holes, I
put it-ahem!-to one sweetened dram,
in a modert-size tumbler, and of
mornin' like"
s'But, Uncle Adam,' interrupted Mrs.
Trammell, 81 don't think wife has any
right to limit her
''Cert'nly not" Mr.. Spivey broke in,
with, for him, surprising quickness-
''cert'nly not, Nicely; it's your husband
a-limitin' of himself. understand you,
Jonce Trammell, to say that it air the
said party O. the second part that's a.
limitin' of hisself to one sweetened
dram of mornin' like. And now
rising, and taking slyly, but with tri-
umphant smiles, bottle, which he set
upon the sill of the window" I've
fotch this bottle along, and l puts it on
the winder-shelf here, for Nicely to make
the first toddy with her own captiwatin'
hands, and, as it war, open the ball and
both O. the parties has had good
sixty-eight years old, a-goin' on my
sixty-nine, and I've been witness
when people has made many comper-
mise; but I will say 1 never were wit
ness to one that was farrer for both par
ties than what Jonce Trammell and
Nicely Trammell has now called on me
to witness, and never heard two people
talk farrer or more reasonable than both
the said parties, and
"But, Uncle Adam,'' tried to urge
Jonce. who had not been able to get in
a word, though constantly so DESTROYS
and repeatedly endeavoring-''but, I'm
Gle Adam
{" I understand you, Jonce, perfect
ly," persistently refusing to be inter-
rupted, the old gentleman continued,
IS and I stand by what you say, that
compromise couldn't be farrer for both
parties; and I'm sixty EIGHT year old,
a-goin' on to my sixty-nine, and both
the parties will say SO a long arfter I'm
in my grave"
Without another word from any of
the three, Mr.. Spivey left the house,
mounted his horse, and rode away.
When he had gone, Mrs. Trammell
rose and walked to where her husband |
sat, with his hands covering his eyes.
s'Jonce, don't want you to consider |
yourself bound by anything that has
been said by Uncle Adam. I have. no
right, and Uncle Adam had no right
Jonce arose with passion, and looked |
upon her whom he loved better than his |
own life.
s'Meely," said he, 81 DOT and may
strike me dead if L"
She placed her hand upon his lips,
put herself in his arms, and wept upon
his breast.
For full forty years Jonce Trammell
kept his part. The only deception his
wife ever practiced upon him afterward
was when she saw him abstaining from
his morning dram, knowing the reason
why, to make show of working at her
loom. She died first. From the first day
Of her sickness until her own death, a
year after, he could never be induced to
take spirits of any sort.
The great peace-maker, as long as he
lived, regarded the Trammell Compro-
mise his masterpiece of work in this his
favorite line.
'You see," he would often say,
swhen two things has got to be fotch
together in compromise that's as fur
apart as weavin' and the drinkin' o.
,perrits, and which one is wertu in
female person, and the tother a vice
I'm not a-speakin' of one sweetened
Tram of a mornin' like, but sich as
Jonce Trammell's drinkin' when he got
:a'rly sot in, and which is vice in a
male person-it take man o. exper 'ence