Hand County press. (Miller, Dakota [S.D.]) 1882-1893, 1882-08-02
PLEAsANrRIEs.

PLEASANIRIES
Nora sentiment exhibited IN the
wag Of dogs tail when he's waiting for
o bone.
AN elderly Judge is reported as opposed
to being laid on the shelf, though he
does not object to being retained on the
bench.
An enthusiastic Endorsement" must
mean when o banker 10 over anxious 10
back your note-of-hand; but where's
such a man?
THE poet who sweetly referred TO the
"sighing Of the winds should go out
West and experience q sighclone.-
Philadelphia Bulletin.
"IsN'T this shirred bonnet just too
sweet for anything?" asked Mrs. Smith
Of her husband. ST shirred think il
was." answered Mr.. Smith, as he in
spected the bill. !
"How could you think Of calling
auntie stupid2 Go to her Immediately,
and tell her you are sorry" Freddy
goes to aunt;e, and says, "Auntie,
I am sorry you are SO stupid"
SUPERSTITION" Do you believe IN
signs 2" asked the shopkeeper. "Well,
yes, used to" said Fogg; "but since
you placed in the window, Selling for
less than cost I have weakened oonsid-
erably."
An eminent scientist says that when
lady cannot sit down without her nose
becoming red it shows that there Is i'm.
perfect circulation OF the blood, caused
by tight lacing. Same with gentlemen.
A red nose is sure sign of tightness
somewhere.
aAupEAMUs IdrTUR.
Tine sun Ia rising In the west,
The donkey se-ks his downy nest;
The festive goose, the playful COW,
GsyIy leap from bough TO bcugh.
The elephant with cheerful voice
skips bithely DER the lea,
The bats and beetles do rejoice;
Oil let us, too, be gay.
"AvoID contradicting your wife" " said
. recent writer. A very good idea, and
il would be well for wives TO avoid con-
tradicting their husbands, also. There
is altogether too much OF this sort OF
thing going on, and every married man
knows it.-New Haven Register.
GEORGE" said materfamilias to the
small boy, "if you do not behave. better
/ shall send you to bed fifteen minutes
before your usual time" And then
George put in this poser II say,
mother, when I do behave first.rate why
do you not let me stay up fifteen min
utes beyond my regular time?"
IT is always safe to beware Of. the
sycophantly polite. The spitz dog that
fawns and icks your hand to-day is apt
TO bite tomorrow. while the gruff mas
tiff will be faithful TO you even after you
have proved faithless to him. And the
nature Of mankind partakes of the same
general characteristics as that Of the
canine kingdom.
"BUr why did you leave her so
hastily p asked sympathizing friend,
who was trying to console lover for his
separation from the object Of his idol
atrv "oh. il was a sudden impulse" |"
a. What sort of an impulse p 81 don't
know exactly." returned the sufferer
thouehtfully, "but it must have been
at least a No. L."
A x,v,srv. WAS trava,;no along a
,orn,rv ro.a in scotland ona dav IN
-. r;a;rc ra.har : Iono ,aon boy..
and he himself dressed IN rather AN odd
looking cap ana 'arge ca"ie' c.oak'
when . gentleman came aiong' r'oins .
nne horse' wnicn scared NJ the preacner
ana nus morse. weh' sir' saio 'ne
gentleman, ye ~"a scare tne very oeei,
sur. Ihats my business ST. sara
the preacner.
A FEW mornings ago seven prisoners
escaped from the county jail. Two cit
izens OF Austin were talking about the
affair. One OF them remarked: "Those
| vary ahYauVd IN vnaka THAR