Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1882-11-16
Neighboring Notes.

CtSJtI lOl soiut lliue anu now 10 get
there has been a subject of the most
profound discussion for days between us
and our friends. Some advised us to
take the overland route to Fennimore,
but not wishing to risk life and limb be-
hind the fiery, untamed livery horses
that are used between Boscobel and tina.
town, we concluded with our usual de-
session of character to 60 by rail.
As the train leaves at O. clock, half an
hour before ouI usual time of rising we
borrowed an alarm-cloek and set it to 90
off at three in the morning.
Along in the night dreadful noise
aroused every one in the house and when
we rushed out of the room and reached
the top of the stairs we found the head
OF the house already there, sumptiously
arrayed in an overcoat and boots with a
pistol in his hand, preceded by his wife,
who carried a lamp and cried in tones
Of horror:
"What does it mean, what does it
mean?"
ut means burglary, highway robbery,
murderr' exclaimed Mr.. Smithers.
brandishing his pistol and looking saw
agely down stairs.
When he said murder his wife
jumped about two feet high, gave an
earpiercing yell that would have fright
ened Frank James himself to death had
he been there, lodged behind her hus-
band, and dropped the lamp with a crash
leaving us in total darkness. "What do
you mean by dropping that lampP'
cried Mr.. Smithers, in agonized tones
''Want us all to be murdered in cold
blood and darkness don't you. Did it
on purpose to give them rascals down
stairs chance to carry off the silver
ware didn't you! wanted"
In the meantime we had rushed into
our room and grasping the lamp which
we had left burning, reappeared and
handed it to Mrs. Smithers and her hus-
band tried to push her forward saying
in digniiied surprise:
"Well, why don't you go on?' but
she dug her heels in the carpet and re-
fused to advance, crying;
"Oh | daren't, I'm afraidtn
"What are you afraid of, ain t here, :"
he inquired loftily, examining his pistol
like man who was used to such deadly
weapons.
You 60 first she cried, setting her
teeth and hanging to the banister for
dear life, 81 can't" hecried: How an
l see to fire in the dark, I'd likdto know!
you women haven't got any reasoning
faculties anyhow" "Why don't you
go onr' and Mr.. Smithers pushed up
his coat sleeve and looked rs combative
and dangerous as men usually do when
there is no danger.
At this moment thought flashed
across our brain and we cried: "Oh we
know what it was, it was the alarm
clock?n
Investigation proved we were right
and proved furthermore that it was
eleven instead of three. That's all a
woman knows growled Mr.. Smithers,
"Ill set it now myself and then it will
be all right he added, with lofty con-
descension and we retired for the second
! time
When the next alarm sounded we
arose, dressed and having partaken of
light breakfast Mrs. Smithers CHANGED
to glance at the time-piece and exclaim-
ed. "Why, what's the matter! its only
one o'clock?i
"You didn't count that on your fingers
did you, or have you made discovery"
cried her husband, swith whitening sar-
casm. Cant you see that clocks run
DOWN." and he pulled out his watch,
looked at 1t and an expression of blank
amazement overspread his face.
Il knew was right" cried bis wife,
noticing the look and divining the cause.
You didn't set the alarm right"
"Oh, you're brilliant you are, you al
ways know everythingn' replied MIR
Smithers, with mock Difference, and then
he threw himself on the lounge, saying:
''Drat larm-clocks and confound
women and Lancaster, and the next
moment he was snoring.
We sat up the balance of the night
and when it was time called Mr.. Smithers
who stretched lazily, rose deliberately,
declaring he was going to have cup OF
coffee before he went. "It's train time
now and you'll get leftr' said his wife
persuasively, handing him his coat and
hat.
"Oh there's plenty of time" he re-
piled, without hurrying in the least" |
don know anything about it'll suppose,
never went off on train before did /!
Want me to wait around the depot an
hour and catch my death of cold don't
you" do hurry! said his wife coax
ingly, ignoring his remarks and putting
his satchel in his hand.
"Well, if you won't get my breakfast
and must go half starved" he replied
condescendingly, I'm bound to have
a cigar first and he began unbuttoning
his coat---and we went out and walked
rapidly to the depot, and as the train
moved off we saw man running down
the street swinging his hat and signal
ling for the train to stop. But it didn't
stop! When we reached Woodman we
found the depot looking lonely in the
mist. The cars waiting on the narrow
gauge seemed more like toys than ser
viceable carriages. and the hotel, snug
as n robins nest nestled at the foot OF
the bluff; and the bluff rose up losing
itself in cloud of fog.
After breakfast we climbed the hill
and waited for the lifting of the mists
that were rising slowly, as the smoke of
q campfire circles gracefully up and
vanished in space. In the west the mist
hung cool and grey but turning to the
east it flushed to pink then changed to
light as the sun shonc out. and quickly
it was vanished, vanishing mysteriouslv.
L