Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-03-23
PUSGRNT PARAGRAPHS.

nest.egg.
Fnll-length statutes stand all kinds
Of weather.
How to prepare hot bed-Pu. cay
enne pepper between the sheets.
A butchers is 4 risky business; be
often has the greater part Of his fortune
at steak.
We have always though; the quota
tion should read "The boy stewed on
the burning deck"
The oldest inhAbitant is generally a
man not because he Is given to lying,
but because he commenced owning up
TO his age sooner.
Ice cream is tame and chicken salad
commonplace. A regular dried apple
party would be something unusual, and
a real swell affair.
No piece Of art in America has
charmed Oscar Wilde more than the
picture on the back Of Uncle Samuels
hundred-dollar bills.
An nsthetic poe: wrote: " The muses.
kiss with lips OF fame" bat when he
found the second word printed mules
be talked like a bnrIy pirate for FIVE
minutes.
In the mountains-ArabelIa whose
soul is wrapped in science): "Charles,
ism; this gneiss?" Charles who is
deeply interested in Arabellal: "Nicel
It's delicicus.r
MAN Reading" q picture by Meis-
sonier, had been sold for $4,000. II
the man is reading a dressmakers bill
the sale Of the picture will just about
get him ont even.
"TheIe, have 1t r. exclaimed Jones,
who had been looking at slapdash's
painting. "The trouble is this, he
uses too much ochre." Yes" said
Fogg, mediocre"
A while ago party of lynchers post
poned the hanging Ave minutes to allow
the victim time to finish smoking a
cigar. This proves that the use OF
tobacco prolongs life.
Mustspha Bey. the ruler of Tunis.
bought 100000 umbrellas while in
Paris. He is bound to have one around
when wanted. Mustapha is evidently
preparing for long reign.
Miss Wedde, of Prussia, sixteen
years old, is eight feet high and weighs
$50 pounds. The gentleman who veds
Miss Wedde will howl when the bill for
her sealskin sack comes in.
A man who detected piece of bark
in his sausage visited the Butchers shop
TO know what had become OF the rest
of the dog. The butcher was so affected
that he could give him only part Of
the tale.
A nobleman had married three wives
who had been his servants. A beggar
woman meeting him in the street made
him q very low courtesy. "Ah2 bless
your lordship." she said, "and send you
long life. for IL you do but live long
enough We shall all be ladies in time"
"How do you like Europey" /" It's
too splendid for anythinsl" was the re-
ply. "And were ron sickY' "YeS
awfully sick" "And was your husband
good to your "oh, he was too good
for anythingl Just Is soon as he found
out was sick he went and drank salt
water, so as TO be seasick in unison
with me. and I'm not his second wife,
eitherI"
A shrewd belle called on seversl rival
beauties and made them believe that
her father was going to have the house
illuminated by electricity. Not 10 be
ouidone they persuaded their papas to
got the electric light aud have 1t doubly
strong. Now those beauties are COW
cred with freckles and tan, while the
originator Of the plot continues to daz-
ale visitors beneath her gas Jets.
TO ooLIAR SUTTON.
Somehow yUu always seem too small
To rightly At the hustonhola.
on pcAriy disk. you rack my soni
When down into mr. shoss y0z hiL
lose yoa twenty times ; week.
And find YOU vhou think yau iost
When hunting you ca anosus OF froel.
What ealogies % peace ] speak
You wander coldly dexn my back.
And Ger tho carpet niahly roll.
Then underneath sha bureau roll
And settle n the farthass crack.
-Paoz-