The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1882-11-17
WHY WE LAUGH.
A nice old girl who Is learning to dance
the German-Ohio.

A nice old girl who Is learning to dance
the German-Ohio.
The waist of time can always be found In
the hour glass.--Boston Star.
A simple but significant inscription iu =
western cemetery: "The editor was In"
It was the contractor, who lost on the job,
that builded better than he knew.-Boston
Transcript.
Down In Ohio 1t IL considered luck to see
a ball over your right shoulder, In case you
are within ten feet of the fence.
No matter how loose An engagement ring
may be, the diamond never slips around on
the inside Of lsdy's 6nger.-Puck.
One of the patent Ohio grave torpedoes
was tried on mule In Indiana to see how It
would work. He lifted op one foot when
the explosion occurred but never stopped
nunching fodder.
Sine Of the papers, says the Cincinnati
Gazette, that are publishing q picture OF
Lydia Pinkham when she was girl OF forty
and calling II correct likeness Of Mrs.Lang-
try, are likely to get themselves sued for
libel.
Subscribers of the Boomerang who find
cross bones and skull, with crest Of metallic
burial casket drawn IN blood, on the wrapper
Of their paper, will know that their subscrip-
tion has expired, and that something has got
to be done.-Bo0merdng.
ais your master IMP" asked visitor of the
servant of . man about town, q treasure OF
honesty and truthfulness fresh from the
country. "He Is, but he cannot see anyone,
sir!" "Ab! Is he sick? nothing serious
hope?" mo, sir. He's drunk"
A physician falls into fit while making ,
round Of visits, and Is carried into drug store
"Send for DR.. X-," says somebody. "No,
no, not for him." says the dying man feebly
at the mention Of bis rivals name. ssIf he
brought me around It would advertise him
prefer to de-"
Blotting paper was discovered In 1856
Previous to that, when . man dropped
splotch Of Ink on the lower left hand corner
OF his paper he would give 1t lick with bis
tongue toward the upper right hand corner
and make better picture Of the comet oi
1882 than any that has ye. appeared in the
illustrated pspers.
A party Of Texan wagoners, after hard
days pull, were chatting around the camr
fire while they smoked their pipes. "Sanbo
me bhoy," exclaimed Pat, rollicking Irish
man, to . jolly darkey, "tell US what make.
your nose 80 nat." "Dun'no, Mars Pat,
answered Sam, "but 'spect it's to keep me
from pokin' my nose into udder pesplet
business"
A fountain In the public square Of Sar
Francisco needed painting. An artist agreed
to do 1t for nothing, provided he could take
as much time as he pleased for the Job, and
erect fence to protect him from idle snriosi
ty while ut work. But 1t seems that the
painter has sold the surface Of the fence tt
advertisers, and nobody knows how long hi
will be painting the fountain.
An old negro professed to be indifferent a.
to future state, believing that ''dey'll MAKE
niggers work eben in heaben." A clergyma
tried to argue him out of his opinion by rep
resenting that there was no work for him o.
any one else In heaven. "You 60 way
massa," was his reply, ~ know better! l
dere's no udder work for culled pussons VI
dere, dsy'll make him shub de clouds along!'