The Mankato free press. [volume] (Mankato, Blue Earth County, Minn.) 1879-1924, 1882-01-20
On the Death Of a Short Horn.
Melancholy Occurrence Truth than
Humor.

The editor of the writing down. de-
partment of a live contemporary, says
the San Francisco Post. had just finished
disinfecting an editorial before sending
it in to the printers, when an exhausted
looking "speciaP' reporter, with shiny
coat and hungry look, slid into the
victims" chair, and said:
"If you please. sir, / haven't brought
whole, I will resign"
"What the deuce do you mean, sirp"
growled the slave pen-driver, aghast at
such audacity from a reportorial peon
at ten dollars a week.
1.-The fact is" said the interviewer,
after working off graveyard cough, II
can't stand it any longer. I'm all broke
up"
Hungry, ehp" sneered the boss jour-
nalist. ats singular how the writers
on this paper are always snivelling for
something to eat"
"'Taint so much that" replied the
reporter, feebly. "It's these personal
interviews that are doing it. You'll have
toput some tougher man in my place.
l don't think I've got the stamina and
assurance required for personal journal
ism, any way"
Anybody licked you to-day?" growl-
ed the editor. you're pretty report
er to squeal at being thrown down stairs
now and then"
20, don't mind the throwing out.
I'm used to that; but it's the exposure
and fatigue that plays me out. !
haven't got the staying powers. you see."
'The whatp'
"Why. the hang on-the grip-don't
you understand? For instance, last
week I've been on the Palace Hotel de-
tail to interview noted arrivals; four
nights hand running I've had to crawl
under those Internally low bedsteads
they have at the Palace, and lie there
twelve or fourteen hours, although the
dust and feathers kept out every word
the distinguished arrivals said; then,
perhaps, along in the morning; I'd fall
asleep and be hunted in the nose few
times by sweeping-machine. Perhaps
you imagine that's pleasant?''
you should wear one of those Patent
Key-hole Nose and Eye Protectors, like
the rest of the boys do" said the other.
bad cold you've got there"
eth be the death of me-" gasped the
official, who had been coughing for five
minutes. II caught it last week on that
divorce case on Van Ness avenue. To
get at the bottom of facts, I had to
hide in the bathroom for two days. ]
kept the tub filed, and every time any.
body came round, I'd have to dive in to
hide myself. Sometimes I couldn't
come to the surface to breathe for more
than an hour"
That's nothing" abstractedly re-
piled the editor, who was writing sem
sational item with the scissors.
"Ain't, ehp" muttered the journalistic
wreck. "But last nights work lets me
out for good. You know was sent up
to skulk round that Supervisors house,
to work up that sewer steal matter.
Well, there was no closet, or any other
high grass in the room, so had to rush
up the chimney. Twas getting on first
rate, and had both cuffs filled with mem.
orandums, when, toward evening. the
weather turned chilly, and I'm blessed
if they didn't start fire in the CRATE.
l had to shin up clear to the top Of the
house-four stories-to get out. Look
herew and the interviewer held up a
badly-scorched pair of pants. and shoes
with the bottoms burned clean out.
$50 you think you'll quit, ehP"
"Well, ! should smile," said the
smoked-out party, grimly. II thought
I would try and hang on until the soup.
houses opened, but it's no" and
his voice died away into an inaudible
rattle,
II WAC mora than an bour before the
editor looked up again, and then he
started and said:
"Great Scotti he's dead! Well, this
is luck. Here. somebody, lock the door,
quick, and help me put the corpse in
the closet until the paper goes to press"
And, with grin of fiendish delight,
the olive" quill-driver started in on a
pathetic account of the sad event, head
ed, MELANCHOLY OCCURRENCE! Sud
den Death Of Well-Knot0n Journalist"