The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1882-05-12
WRAr OOsEs OF SWAPPING.

n
silioned ones; one feels more comfort
|ble in an honest cid blue coat with
|ong tail than in the silly things worn
ow-a-days-nothing in front and moth.
be behind; and one walks easier in old
oots than in new ones, especially if he
troubled with corns; and everybody
las corns in due time; some hurt here,
others there.
So think to-day, now am old; but
Nhen boy of twelve was always hav-
rs something new. If I got a new
knife or new bow and arrow / carried
hem about with me two, three or four
lays, then left them lying around or
ost or snapped them and had something
lse new; and from curiosity soon ac-
uired love for swapping, and from
his might easily have gone to something
Forse Il eur Lord had not caused my old
ncle to give me two smart slaps at the
ight &ma
Every bargain needs two people, one
aay be bad for both: sthe clever fellow
radually becomes rascal, the stupid
ne 3 beggar.
Well. must, without knowing il have
saned little toward the latter side, for
eople have always reckoned me among
lie stupid ones, and when I look at the
ondition of my property can't exactly
ontradict them. AS nv friend Laud-
ord Gollenreider In Trepton says, ''Iet
be as they like, / got the slaps, and
inee IN my native city this was thought
ight probably deserved them.
But the reason I got them is as fol-
Ows:
I had q wonderfully handsome buck
abbit, maltese cat with white face, and
~ best friend, Fritz Ritsch. wanted it.
ritz Ritseh and were always swapping
nd had received all kinds of fine
hings from him, only it was pity that
didn't exactly know what to do
18th them. Well, this time he wanted
give me In exchange for my rabbit
ght chessmen, three blown eggs and
alf Of pair Of snuffers. was also to
ave one of the pups of his Aunt Rump-
Er's terrier when 1t had pups, which,
oveYer, as I afterwards learned by ex-
erienee, wouldn't have been likely to
appen, as it was a male dog. Well,
Ferything was all right except the half
lat through my head, and asked,
Fritz, what am TO do with this old half
ing2'
why" said he, 81 found it when I
snt into the woodward yesterday; you
n surely find the other half there and
en- sell It for eight groschen-
Yes, that might easily do but had
ten looked and never found anything,
the matter seemed doubtful. Then he
id: Fritz, for my name was Fritz,
o-"iust think, my father is only a
acksmith and your father is Burger
eister; why shouldn't you find some
ing as well as I?'
This was true, so the bargain was con-
Hded and he went away. But as he
alked ont of the garden gate with my
bbit and stood looking at my three
own eggs and half pair of snufers-
aack, smack got the two slaps, and
hen looked around saw my mothers
Fother, Uncle Matthies, who had been
ting behind the apple tree and heard
q whole bargain.
My Uncle Matthies vas an old soldier
ID had queer ways; he always struck
st and then told why. He had been
Hungary and Poland, seen the world
ID knew a great many stories; but the
orst Of his stories was that they always
d moral which would gladly had
m omit, for when he came to it he al.
Rys gave me box on the ear to make
3 remember it better.
When I had received the slaps my
ncle Matthies sat down on the bench
lder the apple tree and said, "Boy,
you know why you had that me-
ento 2"
mo. uncle" said I, "you haven't told
y story"
'sThat viii come afterwards" he re-
led. 'fYou got the punishment for
bur bargaining, for so far as know,
bur father wants 20 bring up no jockeys.
ow come here and listen TO the story"
when I was stationed at Peterwar-
In with the Hungarian Uhlans we had
captain in the squadron, man who
ID hump between his shoulders and
be always wanting something new, and
full of whims as donkey is of gray
irs; If he fell into gutter he didn't
st until he tumbled into a ditch too,
d II he wore boots to-day wonld have
oes tomorrow and slippers the day
ter. Yet he had plenty of money and
e follies his foolish brain invented, his
lrse made good, at least for time.
s'What then was more natural than
at our little misshapen captain should
ways have crowd of hungry comrades
,ont him who stuck like burs, drained
m like leeches, but laughed at him
Ze rascals behind his back. Well, one
this brotherhood told him that the
eatest pleasure in the world was to sit
a glass coach drawn by four horses
d ride up and down the high road.
ur little captain remembered that he
dn't done this, SO it was something
w, and as my friend Cobbler Samekow
Rostock used to say, consequently
e glass coach and mares were procured
ID the greatest pleasure in the world
gan, but also came to speedy end; j;
when our little whipperstraw of a
plain sat In the glass coach and slid
om one window to the other, like the
bYiI In a medicine bottle, the people
pod still and laughed as if they saw an
e.
after three days it was an old story,
it luckily the colonel of the regiment
arried young wife and she had set
heart on driving up and down the
hway in q glass coach drawn by four
NJ, q, S,rslarso1 7,od No o11fooff0r,