The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-25
Two Women at Front Doors.

AcTOSS Tie SUTeeC lTOIu our nOttSo Is Il
new double brick block, with front door
steps exactly alike. Two families.
strangers to each other, lately moved
into these twin houses. and there began
a rivalry between the "better half Of
each family as to which of the two door
steps should be most lastly decorated.
The landing on the left was first orna-
mented with gorgeous, many-colOred
rug. The lady on the right flung def
ance with bright-hued carpet that COW
cred the steps and reached to the side
walk. The rug at the left looked lone
some, and was reinforced by a low bam-
boo rocker strung with many-colored
ribbons. The lady at the right came to
the door, saw the ribbon rocker, and
resolved to 60 it two better with a
couple of camp-stoOls. beautiful to look
upon, but unsatisfactory for sitting pur-
poses, if the sitter weighs more than a
fairy.
For brief moment the lady at the
left was staggered. but on recovering
her self-possession she rushed in and
dragged out one of those treacherous
hard-to-get-into and easy-to-get-out-of
arrangements called hammock. While
she was lacking this up on the porch. in
such way as would break the first
mans back who tried to ride it, her rival
lowered around the scene, a picture of
apathetic despair. The poor little
guitar, minus one string. with which
she had vainly endeavored to stem the
tide which was setting against her, was
plainly inadequate. At this juncture
fate came to her aid. The discordant
cry of ported flower vender sounded
like the rarest melody to her ear. Aft
er an agony of waiting he came within
hailing distance, and she bought him
out, leaving no living thing for her left
hand neighbor to fasten upon.
The smile of triumph that curled
around the corners of her mouth after
this maneuver was study for paint
er. But it faded as quickly as it came.
The left hand lady matched the floral
display with an improvised aviary, con-
sisting of a yellow canary and green
parrot, which she had previously over
looked, and then she sat down in the
midst of her surroundings with a COM
placent air as of assured victory, to
await the coming of her housemaid,
who had been sent to florists for
gorgeous hanging basket, which was in
tended to drive the iron of defeat
straight into her rivals soul. The right
hand woman was not idle. As a last
resource she produced her parlor aqua
rum, containing a goldfish and a
striped water-lizard (the latter dead.)
Then she appeared, and after short de-
lay came back carrying the family
clOthes-basket.
1t was draped with the crimson-fg-
ured table-cover from the parlor, and
contained the family cat and her large
litter of newly-born kittens. Two staid
citizens might at this time have been
seen making their way, arm in arm. to-
ward this new block, and deep in con-
versation. They stopped before the as
founding display and gazed in wonder.
"Are you to move so soon?' "NO; but
/ should Judge that you were fixing for
an auction sale!' were the remarks ex-
changed. They were the husbands of
the respective ladies. To hide their
emotion, the men sought the nearest
saloon. And while the ladies went in
side their empty houses to have good
cry" a colored man walked off with the
canary, cage and all. while some naughty
boys seguestered every one of the old
cats kittens. Y. NeUs.