Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-09-08

PLEASdNTRFS.


minds him of fool and his money
A FELLOW calls his corns Damon AMI
Pythias because they suffer for each
other.
THERE is only one way to prevent the
Indians from breaking out-don't shut
them IN.
Has it ever occurred to baseball men
that milk-pitcher is generally good
-fy-catcher?
81 AN broken man." said a poet
well, said his friend, entered that
from your pieces"
FooD for reflection: Eating large
supper and going to bed to lie awake
and think about it.
If man applies himself diligently to
getting the Juice out Of an orange he
generally sucks seeds.
THE census gines 100000 miles Of
fence in the United States, and some
how It seems as if il were all on one
farm when you attempt to cut across lots
ID the country.
LAwYER-"Are you, witness, q woman
married." Witness-s'I am" Law
yer-'' Then your husband is where?"
Witness-fHe dead is" The Court
THAT immaterial is.
CAM I hurting you badly" asked a
Boston dentist Of lady whose teeth he
was fixing, and who was emitting hoIri-
bic groans. "Oh, not in the least, but
I love to groan, was the reply. Boston
Globe.
If the Revolutionary warriors had
known It would take 81, 400. 20 for drinks
and cigars to celebrate the centennial of
the victory at Yorktown. they would
probably have given up the fight early
in the contest and paid the tax ON tea.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
"PAUsE," said the highly-cultivated
Boston girl to her lover, who was about
to kill mosquito. ''Pause: IL the
balanced and admirably adapted econ
omy Of nature, man cannot interfere
without disarranglng the whole order of
things" And he paused. Boston i'd
CcrtiSer.
A WASHINGTON dispatch says that en-
ployes in the Treasury Department and
the Department of Justice are now pro-
hibited from smoking while on duty.
Probably this brutal espionage will be
extended until rule making it com-
pulsory Oh public servants to work is
made Chicago Tribune.
HIS idea of prayer: CT tell yer wot,
boys" exclaimed OLD Ben, the toughest
man Of the camp "I tell yer wot, boys,
it made teller feel kinder watery round
the lids to hear that little chit of thing
a settin' up thar like an angel sayin'
her prayers SO cute, Mary had a little
lamb or suthin' er tibet Sort
az THINK bath daily would be ben
efcial in your case, - said physician to
patient. swell, I don't know, doc
tor he feebly replied. al took bath
once, year or two ago; felt better
for while, but it wasn't long before
was just as bad as ever, and I lave been
growing worse ever since This is
almost equal to the French medical
writer, who objected to bathing. be-
cause it removed the natural secretions
OF the skin.
PsYCRonoGICAL.- "This is q funny
doctrine F" exclaimed Brown, who had
been reading of metempsychosis. 1.-The
idea of the human soul entering the
body of an animal According to this
doctrine, my soul, after I get through
with it, may inhabit the body Of jack.
asst" "And why not 2" asked Fogg,
demurely. cit would certainly feel
more at home there than anywhere else.
Boston transcript.
THE SAME OLD TUNE.
The same old tune! She played it years ago
The ancient " Maiden's Prayer "-and know
She'll bang i. out from early morn till noon
The game old tune,
Time alters not The right hand SKINS aloFt
The left beats time in accents none too soft
heard IL first ten years ago last June
The same Old tune
Lo! when shah come answer ~ his :" Prayer
That treless maiden Ut everywhere?
Omay It come i'll golden silence snon-
The same Old tune.
WORDS. THEIR USE IND ABUSE.