The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1882-09-30
Some OF the Beliefs that Pertain
Table Accidents.
"If care were not the waiter
Behind n fellows chair,
When easy going sinners
Sit down to RichmOnd dinners,
By JoVe, it would be rare!
II care We're not the waiter

II care were not the waiter 80
Behind Il fellows chair"
Care may not be an agreeable waiter
behind ones chair or elsewhere, but he.
will not spill not soup down your bnck
nor leave the print OF his thumb on your
glass, nor put his elbows in your eyes on
IN any way disturb the natural repose OF,
your outward being.
There is only one thing can make a
person wretched in both mind and body
at once. That is pair of tight boots,
Then let the waiter be care, if he wants
to, but don't drag in any deaths heads
at our feast. Let us eat, drink and be
merry, for at feast where friends are
assembled and the viands are good
every sense is gratifed, and it is wise
to forget the past and take no thought
for the morrow during the brief hours
it will last,uinGiven that rare and SEM
suous atmosphere filled with the
heavenly breath oil exotic flowers, the
odor of dainty cooking, bright with the
sparkle of light relleGted from FURNISHED
glass and cleaning china, the blended
sweetness of patchouli and Jockey club
and white rose, the admiring Giances of
we'll dressed~nen~ flashing Jewels
and smiles;pf Rbeautifua, women, the
sympathetic glances of social happiness.l
and the pride OF Strength anil enjoy
ment. and lie world Ibe w6psd than d
cynio who coudfind no plGasdfe i'm such
pictureh BUT there will befai deaths
head att the feast oItIis inevitable.
Some one NilI recall the fact that it is
the anniversary OF the death Of Some
7 friend" or 'acqliaintiheey ,Hor> q care
lesssGHgtest wilttn spllli i'tA6 saft'
band make ian allusidn to its be-
ing uhlucky;, orr anOther will discover
that there are Thirteen at table and
wonder which one will be dead before
the year is out. Bad luck to SUCH maa-
tpropos people IIsit likely that thirteen
wouldsit down together anywhere With
out there being, a possibilityIthat one Of
the epmpanYmight die in thecourse of a
year. Misrepresentation are as strong
arh .apa .ar9SfheA III one Shances to
catch a glimpse Of his face in mirror
IlviPn ne IL eip9 he Ihqst 81 ppceleave
the table or he win be uhl1cRy All the
year IF twoLforks are tsAten up inst cad
of knife and fork it denotes a wed-
ding; two spoons, yOu'wihpbeD lucky in
love. A guest at o dinner was once 50
much disturbed at some discovery he
made in a. Slice of bread that he ek.
cused himself, went home and took to his
bed. ,ie.An examination of the bread
which he had regarded with so much
alarm developed the fact that it had
| the ominous words .'Rest in peace
plainly imprinted on the crust. Z It was
learned that the baker had a brother
who was a tombstone cutter, and he had
paved hiS oven, with some work that
had nbt Been called for, anu SO got the
impression of part of an epitaph on his
loaSes.u 40 doubt the lguestLrecovered
when he learned the facts.
There il " guarded'decorum at fash
ionable dinner which usually prevents
guests from making themselves either
conspicuous or disagreeable if they have
.aAfaculty for being either; but at home
dinner, where there are only few in
vited guests present, MANY absurdties
occur An elderly maiden lady who
was dining out wasasked by her host
4 what part of the fowl she preferred.
s.The bosom, if youplease," She replied
| with much dignity. 81
A little girl hearing all the girls say
they would be helped TO some small
piece of some delicacy. carried out the
honest conviction of her nature by ask.
ing for "a very large piece, if you
please. "-Detroit Post and Tribune.