The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1882-10-16
Trials Of the Husband OF u .Fnt Wom
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"Well,' said small, thin, careworn,
nervous, pale, wiry. seedy.looking mpn,
with high forehead and smell oil stale
bear, Us he cut of a piece Of plug tobacro
which he saved from the wreck OF a circus,
II want TO so cut 10 Dakota and take up a
claim and earn n living, lead a quiet lie
and die happy. The circus business is
getting loo uncertain. You see, 1 am the
husband OF the fat woman in the side.
snow. Don't laugh; it is no laughing matter.
Wen married her she was jus! ordi-
nary sire, but now she weighs 40 pounds.
We have travelled with circlses Tor the
past eight years, and while | have done
lotb;og except to wait upon my wife,
iiycn think I have had u soft snap you arc
mistaken. The show has busted and she
has soce with variety show for the rest
Of the season. and am going West to pre-.
plre y home for her" S'5i,, i
".Ate you going TO build q skating rinl:
for her?' the reporter asked, thinking il
smart.
AMrLE PROVISION. u.s.
20, l don't know. Maybe will put up
q tent You have no idea Of the trouble
the husband Of a tut woman has, travelling
with show. Were you ever the husband
OF a lat woman? No? Well, don't ever
be. You would think they were healthy,
but l pledge you MY word the fat women
i'll the side shows are the unhealthiest peo-
pie in the world. They catch everything.
Now, my wife is as healthy any oil them,
bat there is not night but have 10 doc.
tor her for something. The tent is always
damp, and she is continually taking cold.
no sooner get one cold cured than MI.
other one comes on. She will be all right
for half n day, and Just rs the dig show is
about to open in the evening, aud the
crowd in the side show is about to take q
lbs. look Mt her, she will begin to sneeza.
Did you ever hear lat woman sneeze?
No? Well, il you are ever in side show
and one OF them begins to catch her breath
as though she was going TO sneese, you take
my advice and get right out Of there. lam
talking to YOU now rs a friend. My wife
began to catch cold ut Jncktown, aud when
we got 10 A1urraysvile it had settled all
over her. 1t was the biggest settlement in
the State. That night l asked the clerk to
have some ginger tea made fol my wife,
and few pals full Of the ten braced her
uphill We got to Freeport, and there had
10 soak her feet in mustard water and put
y mustard plaster on her chest, The hotel
man there WIS very kind, He fixed IN
ba,h.tub for one Of her feet and COTS burial
case from an undertaken for the other foot,
and did everything possible for her com.
fort: but when used n white couuterpane
10 spre,d the mustard plaster on he got on
Ills ear and charged it in the bill, Obi
YOU husbands OF ordinary.siyed women,
that can souk their ieet in wasll.howl'
and whose chests arc small enough for a
houghten mustard plaster, don't know any.
thing about the trouble we have, Now,
the simple thing Of n lame back is enouel,
10 drive a man crazy. My vile is rhcu.
matte, and about three times week the
pain settles in her back, and have 10 rub
it, should consider it nothing but pic.
mic 10 rub an ordinary sized back, but
when a man has to rnb half an acre Of
lame bacE, to survey It PIT into SECTIONS,
and rub SECTION and mark it So he won't
rub it SECOND time, and rub it as a lame
buck ought to he rubbed, no has got no
sineGure, you bet, And Gorns We'll, YOU
don't know anything about corns. When
you see corns as big us the top Of black.
ing box then you can talk. Oh, I am sick
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