Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1882-03-01
A Conductors Confe ,sfop.

A reporter met an old railroad conduc.
tor IN Chicago recently. and was surrris.
ed to hear at he had been discharged.
"Yes," he sand, 'the old man s,d,
tracked me-
"What forf''
well, l suppose ne thought had toe
much money"
"1ours or his?" And he laughed.
~ Gu rember began working for the
l.. road In 1865, at the close of the war.
FROM 500 month was gradually raised
10 $lOO. The other day the 'old man'(th
superintendent found out that owned and
was paying taxes on $12, 900 or Sl5, OOO
worth OF property. So be kicked. lie
offered to keep me if would ''res,itu.e. "
but said guessed had raiirosded about
long enough.
"How did you save all that money in
10 years from salary Of 5000 Increased
gradually to 81, 200 a year2" And he
laughed again.
AS Pm out Of the business now and
kind o. like railroad companies, don't
mind explaining the couundrum. I'll hold
| up my hand, though, and swear ] ALWAYS
accounted for every passenger ever car
rled. But l wstered m watered the
company like its directors water the stock
And did 1t in this way: You see every
year the president and general officers is
sue an unlimited number of annual passes.
Some OF these are in exchange with other
railroads. but most of them are to tine
high-cock-a-lorums congressman and
members 1.-THE legislature. 1 always made
my business when one of these fellows
took my train TO pipe him off'-tbat is,
get In conversation with him. find out
where he lived and what his business was.
You know passengers always like civil
treatment from conductor; it seems odd
like, With this acquaintance would use
him."
Used him?"
'l es, used him. Knowing about how
often his business required HIM To travel,
travelled tor HIM. Do you catch on? When
he didn't travel just deducted that much
from my cash receipts and credited the
annual hummer with one trip. Ny divl-
sion cash fare was little less than 81, and
1t was poor run tor me If didn't turn in
two or three old buffers"
"Ah, see. You robbed Peter 10 pay
PAUL."
''No, robbed the annual passhol1er to
pay my self. But my best hold was In catch
ing the passholder in robbing the company
There's where | made the most of my
money. You see, the average member of
the legislature not1Duly thinks the company
should carry him free, but ali his friends.
So he loans his pass ID Tom, Dick and
Harry, his neighbors. l made it my bust
ness TO identify every Legislative passhold-
er. Every two or three weeks a man
would get on my train and show up that
pass would give him his check, go on
through the train, do my work, and then
come back and sit down by him, 1 would
say, Let me look at your pass againf He
would hand il out. would then turn TO
my memorandum book and read: 'ArcbI-
me0es Skrubendike. tail, dark hair, 80
years old =; annual. Ol07.' Thea I would
turn to the rooster and say: "Why, you're
not Archimedes Skrubenkike; you've no
right TO ride on this pass. Read the con-
ditIons on the back-Not transferable.
And then The fellow would go all to pieces.
He would beg, and plead and offer to pay
fare, but was too fly. When had HIM
bad enough scared. would say. Pm sorry
and | hope this thing will never occur
again. Now, I'll tell you what I'll do Ill
not take up this pass, as l sm instructed to
do, for Skrubenkike Is good friend of
the railroad, and wouldn't have HIM get
into trouble for anything in the world.
You give me $40 and will let you keep
the pass to give bsct to him, only YOU
must promise never to tell HIM you got
caught And the fellow would snatch
out $40 quicker q wink. It's an honest
fact, in one year l worked Old Skruhen
kike for more'n $500.