The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1882-07-01
CEILP BAS EET.

A man does not necessarily talk
cents when he speakes in money-sylla-
bles.-Iorkers Statesman.
The latest way to make fun of a
fellows big feet is to tell him he is
taller lying down than he is stand
ing up.
All Indian remedies for bringing
out new hair will be regarded with
distrust by man who has been once
scalped. -Picayunc
A Winona woman has a cat that is
bringing up young duck. Wonder
if it will develop into young ducat.
Lynn Bee.
The late failure of carrier-pigeon
to cover the distance from Philadel-
phia to New York in certain time
must have been owing to a defective
flaw.
"You know that coffin Sarah Bern
hardt used to sleep in? Well, she
has had rockers on Huntington
Hawkeye.
Bashful lover to his belle: "Would
that | had three Kilograms of dyna-
mitel' 'Why, monsieur" Bashful
lover: "To break the ice between us"
A prominent lumberman has had
ais coat-of-arms painted on the panels
of his carriage, with the Latin motto
"Nidi," which by Interpretation is II
saw"
A man who wants his wife to love
and respect him will never make the
mistake of putting his feet in her slip
pers. Years Of devotion will wipe out
the insult.
The fact that people are going
around buying up old rubber shoes
leads US to suspect that there must be
a new kind of bologna sausage in the
market.-Syracuse Herald.
Hear the man swear. What rage
he is in. He will raise the roof. The
man has copy of yesterdays paper
He thought it was to-day's.-Louis-
vile Courier-Journal.
Smith discovered, after marriage,
that his wife wrote poetry; but he
couldn't do anything about it then.
He had taken her for better or for
worse.-Louisville Courier-J Journal
"Confound it, you've shot the dog
| thought you told me you could hold
a gum" Pat-"Shuse and so | can
yer honor. It's the shot, soor,
couldn't howldn'-New York Post.
1t is said that Jumbo" has not lain
down for five weeks. 1t is not necess-
There are several connected with the
circus who do enough lying for the
whole show.
Fortune is said to knock once at ev-
cry mans door. Not only that, but
fortune seems to climb into the win
dows Of some folks and stay with them.
New Haven Register.
"a fellow must SOW his wild oats
you know" exclaimed the adolescent
John. 'Yes," replied Annie, "but
one shouldn't begin sowing so soon aft
er grading"
''Take that away" said the young
man to the waiter, as he pointed to a
saucer Of whipped cream which had
been brought for his Strawberries: II
did not come in here to be shaved"
Applicant for situation as house
maid: "Well, you see, mum, the
missus at my last place was very
nice person, but [ couldn't get on with
the lady as was cook, SO I was obliged
to leave. Judy.
A gentleman went into a dry goods
store yesterday and asked for ten
yards of naked cambria. The young
lady blushed and said: 81 guess you
mean undressed cambric?" ooh, yes!
that's it,"
Officer of the Prussian Guards, look
ing at the ocean, to his wife: "Isn't
this glorious sight, Minnie? But the
sea seems greatly agitated-probably
has never before seen an officer of the
Prussian Guards"
My dear son" exclaimed old Mrs.
Jenkins last evening, II would't 90
out without something over me. Put
on your oyercoat or your cardamon
jacket, or you'll catch your death of
ammonia Lowell Citizen.
"Women are so contrary" said
Blobbs. 81 thought when | got mar
ried my wife would darn my socks and
let me alone; instead of that she lets
my socks alone and darns me-
Wheeling Journal.
In view of the frequent lynchings