The Red Cloud chief., 1882-06-22
Misfortune In Love.

MIsIOTtune In Love-
George. get your hearse ready for
Mrs. Schmidt's funeral. She buries her
husband to-day and you've got to go to
the Lutheran said q well-known West
Side undertaken to one Of his hearse
drivers a few days ago. while a Mercury
reporter wa within hearing. The man
Of the hearse. ut the order given him,
opened his eyes to almost twice their
natural size, then focusing them on the
scribe, startlingly exclaimed, with an
air of amazement: ''Go0d heavens!
would you believe il, bit this is the
fifth man that woman has married
whom / have had the pleasure of riding
To the cemetery. Now hat seems I'M
usual doesn't it?' inquiringly asked
the driver Of the reporter. .But she is
n good customer for us, and now she Isl
widow again. eh?" unused the man, and
then continuing said: .'Well. she's got
money. Five altogether so far. and /
guess just inside of about eleven years.
And what beats the deck is. she's not
old or bad-looking yet, and amt poor.
either. Why. the last husband she had
was a big, iine-looking Swiss, and we
thought that when she took him he
would last her forever. But no; he
chucked In his checks as quick rs the
rest. and here she is with us
again. Tell you about her and
her husbands" again said the
hearse driver in response to the report
er's interruption. "Well, it is strange,
but rs /, or we. have laid away all her
old men l will tell how it is with her.
You sec, rs far as | have learned from
herself and friends at the buryings. she
came here some time ago a greenhorn
and wcn 10 work out i'm a boarding.
house down on Wooster street, where
You could get a regular dinner for
twenty-five cents and a glass of beer to
wash it down. While she was here the
boss wife got fearful sick and the boss
grew awful Respondent over her, as he
saw she must light out soon. One
Friday night his wife suddenly died.
and about six months after the funeral
the pretty greenhorn was taken from
the kitchen, and after being placed rs
master of the bar, was introduced to
all the boarders and customers as the
boss new wife. The boss from the
start looked rs though he wouldn't live
long after his first wife, and sure
enough he hadn't been married again a
year when he gave up the ghost
through pneumonia. BY this time the
woman had got stouter and finer look |
ing. and | tell you when she used to
stand behind her bar with her arms all
bare. or leaned over the boys at table to
help them TO soup, she just appeared
immense. Well, one of the cookbook
ing fellows on Mercer street
to be gone on her
and she on him, for he was
the first one at table and the
last one away. This was noticed, and
next he was seek behind the bar once
in a while, and then they gave a blow
out or wedding 20 settle the affair. But
seemed the groom was delicate, and
in less than even months he died from
galloping consumption, and l rode him
to the Lutheran Cemetery, where she
had bought a plot to bury her first hus-
band in. Then the widow went in
mourning for nearly a year, when a
young ieweler who worked down in
Maiden Lane showed up. He came
from the same place in Germany rs she
did. and talking of her old home and
folks seemed to make her like him the
Then she got taking off her
mourning clothes until summer came,
and she gave out the news that she was
to sell out and 60 home to Ger
many. Sure enough she did, and mar
ried the jeweler at the same time. They
went TO Germany together, but came
back in short time with hardly . cent.
be went back to his shop, and she to .
yet of rooms they hired. Then in . lit
lie while they decided to open a saloon
again up town. She run it like the
irst place, but he kept at work. so that
with her energy and his earnings
hey began to q Y money again. But
he poor jewc.er caved in with Bright's
disease and was also buried. Irecollect
pust rs well Is yesterday at that time
he said to me: oh. dear. / am 90 un-
lucky in my husbands Her next hus-
,and was the bartender she had TO hire
while her jeweler was sick. They got
llong splendid, when one night while
he was chucking dice with . crowd. he
suddenly threw up his hands and fell
wei Ou Nuc iOOIs n UOSt0I W3S C3lteQ
n and he said it was hesrt-disease. The
Toung man was moody and sickly after
hat for a while, when one night he
vent 10 bed late, saying he did mot sheep
veil, must sleep alone. Next morning
was found dead from keart-disease.
This man was put in the same plot with
he others. and now this last one / am
.Oing to take over makes the fifth. He
lied from cancer in the stomach, and
vas only sick about eight months. She
as just one child. . boy. by her second
lusband." +
"You have great misfortune with
our husbAnds:" said the reporter. who
nd proceeded to interview the charm
" widow. "Oh. yes.' she replied,
nth aheavy SIGH. but I win not hare
ny more such trouble, because I shali
ever marry again-"-E r. NtsrSsy.
"A nttlosnake in Sweetwnter VAL
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