davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

IS: family, s. iOa5 IS: choice, IS 55as o.:
fancy. IS f5a6 40 Wheat higher; No. red fall
ST ISlz for cash; 81 II for July; 81 OsS4 for Au-
aust. Corn higher; S0aS115c for cash; ~ Bfc cor
July: 7Sa7SI4c for August Oats firm; si5fc FOR
July; 3S15c for August Whisky steadv ai + 5
Pork quiet: mess, S22 30 for cash. Box meets
duh. Lard quiet and unchanged.
NAVAL STORES.
LONDON. July 10. $50 o. MUIR autue BIS
INV YORK, July I3.-Rosin ca EN- 95a
05. Turps 6tine firm at 461ka47c.
CHARLESTON, July 13.-Spirits rrpsuffu6
firm, 431Sc bid, 44c asked. ROsin, esile1 and
good strained, 81 Goal IS.
WILMINGTON, July l3.-spirits tn uil Iru
at i31kc Rosin quiet at 81 80 for r-ai-el. and
81 60 for good strained. Tar fr 81 &c.
Crude turpentine firm at 81 50 f. hard and
g 90 for yellow dip and virgin.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

--sst was qulet today
.-4-- actions We quote
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
DELEvAN, WIS, Sept. "a, 1871

UELEVAN, WIS, Sept. q, 1875.
Gents have taken not quite one bottle
OF the Hop Bitters. l was feeble old man
OF seventy eight when 1 got it. To-day l
am as active and feel as well as | did at
thirty. | see great many that need such
medicine. D. BOYCE.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

Steamship Seminole. HaIIett, Boston
Richardson & Barnard.
Steamship Geo Appold, Foster. Baltimore
Jas West & Co.
Schr Grace Bradley, Hupper, Doboy-Jos A
Roberts & Co
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Connections.

Local Sleeping Cars on all night trains be-
tween Savannah and Augusta and Savannah
ana Atianta' and Macon and Albany.
Connections.
EuIa1Ia tram connects at Fort Valley for
Perry daily Except Sunday, and at CntRhert
Tor Fort Gaines daily Except Sunday.
Inc Albany and Blakely train runs daily he
tween tween onlthvne and Albany, and daily (except
sunday between Albany and Blakelv.
Inc Albany Accommodation train runs daily
except monday from Smithville to Albany
ana daily Except Sunday from Albany To
At Savannah with Savannah Florida and
western Railway, at Augusta with all lines 10
North and East, at Atlanta with Air Line and
West. W. -4A'' anu
Berths IN Sleeping Cars can be secureda nj
SCIiREINER'S, 1s7 Congress street.
w. O. a, ~Bh i-, WILLIAM ROGERS.
9eH. ass Agt.' Gen. Supt., Savannah.
r, .. n. ohAW, w. K. SHELIMAN
Gen. Irav. Agt. Supt. s. w. r R., Macon. Ga
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Charleston & Savannah Ry. Ca.
'O'"a NoT'H -1Tatns AZ and 4s.

SAVANNAH, Ga, June 9. 1882
fOMAENSING SUNDAY, June 9TH. at 3-0O.
m, and until further notice trans w "a; q;
arrive and depart as follows "aihs VIII
Chino Nh
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
University Of Georgia.

THE Commencement Exercises will begin on
Il Saturday, July 18th, which is class day.
Commencement Sermon on Sunday, by Rev.
J. S. KEY, D. D. Monday-SophOmore and
Junior Day. Tuesday-Oration before the
Societies by Hon. j. G. G. BLACK; meeting of
the Society of Alumni in the afternoon; Chan
cellOr's reception at night. Wednesday-Co
mencement Day.
L. Fl. CHARBONNIER,
Secretary FaculLy
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
OTTAWA HOUSE.
Educational.
Augusta Female Seminary,
STAUNTON, VA.

MISS MARY J. BALDWIN. ..........P Principal
"OPENS September 9th, closes June, 1888.
~ Unsurpassed in its location, in its buildings
and grounds, In its general appointments and
sanitary arrangements; its full corps of SUI
periOr and experienced teachers; its unrivaled
advantages in Music, Modern Languages, Flo
cutiOn, Fine Arts, Physical Culture, and in
structed in the Theory aud Practice of Cook.
ingS the successful efforts made to secure
health, comfort and happiness; its opposition
to extravaganza; its standard of solid scholar
ship. For full particulars apply to the Principal
for catalogues
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

-s.4-aeF Ec1auEs-SiUrY day
.slE attached, 81 S215; New
pr exchange I1y az at Is per cent.
Der cent. premium,
.r H1eH=.-Luu B01Gs.-1arEet
T cent, l93 bid, lU4
pei cent, le1 bid,
..sa rr cent f04 bid. 106
rHr cent, ST bid, So asked.
Dr. s- l.I. 100 asked New So
-I.s bio = asked
-L.--..t t-m for State or GeOr-
I-ta S.. 1859. eX-cOupOn, 100
--r.- . per sent, coupons
.-. I--r maturity 1889 aud ESQ,
-s-t asked: Georgia mort
A.. .a road regular per cent,
s- Ell JulE, maturity 1886,
-f. . asked: Georgia Z per
I quarterly, eX coupon, III
.. Georgia Q ger cent, coupons
-- l-.r. maturity 1895, ex-cOupOn,
Market for Central is
E.. silE. We gI0le Augusta and
JAP ceIJ. guaranteed. eN-div., liz
zaCf- b common, 49, Did,
south esrar1 uer cent guarau-
lf- o'l. Ii3 asked Central
-- certificates ind. ex-div-.
-itt.et uull Aelandc q
-.s.a .ou81.i lated = per cent. ,
= - ls-.i - - -, ~ =, f, 2
49,, -, H. 80
.a-- $685. % bid. IS ssked.
T mortgage = per sent,
t a-i July, maturity
.9,-o,e fs1 and
Z $50 ~ 3 -, - - -. ~
-sN---.-- 20 SsgS - -
... $50, sl-,,,t--,,- -e1 ga ~,
.,.,,e - ~ o. 49,
l'i' o-I c,,. - -.
.....- .-..-.--.. a1z7rsfs d
-.H. 10 zs1. Western Ala
a11 or cent, 1i2 bid, li3
@ s ti.r Ia en- 10rsed, III
1e1-zs 8 Florida %
r.. rlrriuE tendeu y.
ulr.- .-arrH SIDES. 15ltc-; shout
Irs -..i e'-5r rib sides. lie.
Shoulders t4; Hams. 19c.
Hre- rlp ana unchaug-
Hs .l3c.; . lbs. lie;
l. -ani Arrow, 81 6D0
brand and quantity.
-... rl-Ea- i- steady; demand
ample We quote: Prints,
...r. .H".." ..-rHre~ - E1fa ~
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
MEMORANDA

Steamship Geo Appold. Baltimore.
Steamship Seminole. Boston.
Schr Grace Bradley, Doboy.
Schr Ida Lawrence. Brunswick.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Il. L.. Raymond & Co.,
COMMISSION STOCK BROKERS,
No. 4 Pine street. New York

transact a general brokerage business with
experience and excellent facilities. Railroad
Stocks carried on to 10 per cent. margin FL
nancial Report, devoted to the interest OF in
Vestors ana operators mailed free; also com
pete information.
ORDERS ON GAN FRANCISCO EXCHANGE
ALSO EAECUTED.
80 In offering our services to out-of town
investors we will, when desired, furnish promi-
nent references, including Bankers, Senator's
and Merchants,
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
JACKSONVILLE nrnnn

twean TS,Ieeplug cars on this train daily he
Tween Jacksonville and Cincinnati and he
and Fridays. -''ion oh tuesdays
Passengers leaving Macon at 7.son ~ no.,
neg al Jesup with this train for Florida deijv
rassse9gers from Florida by this train con.
m daily. az MACON at
Passengers for Brunswick take tbis +ro;,.
Sunday. III uaiiy, except
Cas- rdaSse9ngers from Savannah for Gainesville
Fernandina) take this train. A'oou VeAcepE
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

1t is the concurrent testimony Of the public
ana the medical profession that Hostetter' s
stomach Bitters is a medicine which achieves
results speedily felt. thorough and benign.
baside rectifying liver disorder, it invigorates
the Feeble, eonquers kidney and bladder com
plants, and hastens the convalescence OF those
recovering from enfeebling diseases. Moreover,
1t IS the grand specific for fever and ague.
For sale by all Druggists and Dealers gener-
ally. =
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
DEPARTED YESTERDAY
SAILED YESTERD

DEPARTED YESTERDAY
Steamer David Clark. Hallowes, Darien and
BI Observation-Disclosures & Hartman.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Railroads.
Central & Southwestern R. R'ds

SAVANNAH GA, May 9th, 1882.
ON and after MONDAY, May 2Sth, 1882, pas
" senger trains on the Central and South
western Railroads and branches will run a.
follows;
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
MeGI!etwsi.
a OA1D.

ATHENS, GA, February 22d, 1873. q
SIR-My child, five years old. had IN
symptoms of worms. I tried Caiomel A
N and other worm medicines, but failed IW
H to expel any. Seeing Mr., Bains' certifi- aM
"A cate, got vial of SMITHS WORM M
OIL, and the first dose brought 40 I'D
worms, and the second dose so manyM
n were passed did not count them.
Y s. II. ADAMS. I'd
~ For sale by druggists generally. Pre-GN
pared by Z. s. LYNDON. Athens, Ga.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
EVENING REPORT.

Paris, July 13.-The weekly statement of
the Bank OF France shows a specie decrease
in silver.
LONDON. July 13.-The weekly statement Of
the Bank of England shows a decrease in
specie Of e41,OOO
LOSDOS. July Is. 4 p. m.-Consols, 90 9 10 for
money; g936 for account
PARIS July u, 4 o. m -Rentes. Sif Zoe.
NEW YORK, July - Exchange. 81 s. Gov
eminent bonds generally unchanged; new
figes. 10l4 four and a half per cents. ia: four
per cents, 1ls9s. Money, 2I6a3 per cent State
bonds duh and unchanged
Sub-Ireasury balances-COin, SSf, BAG, goo 90;
Currency. IS ca, 600 90.
Stocks mainly firm; 1s1S above yesterday,
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

-itrately stockei. de-
Market well stocked
--inaud. not uuch c0miTS
lrEst lightly stocked t,emapd
Georgia ana Florida, very IIffls
quotations nominal. SfraP-
-lrida quieti not much Eelng
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Savannah, Florida & Western Rv

SUPERINTENDENT OFFICE.
SAVANNAH, June z, 1882.
I'm AND AFTER SUNDAY, june 4 1sss
~ ~ Passenger Trains on this road viii run AZ
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
SOUTHERN REMALE COLLkGE.

LAdhANHE, GA,
WITH a full faculty. fine buildings and
w complete outfit for Literary, Music and
Art Departments, opens September Goth. Ad-
vantages unsurpassed. Last catalogue num-
bered AS pupils and 10 in music. Annual ex-
ing, $2O7; the same with music, $267. Cores
pondence invited. Write for catalogue.
l. f. COX President
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

FEMALE SEMINARY
SUCCESSFUL career for thirty-six years
- Course of study thorough and select. Lo-
Gated in the world-renowned Blue Grass coun-
try. Healthy and beautiful Buildings being
enlarged. Next session begins September 9TH
For catalogue and further information write
to j. j. FUCKER, LII. D..
Georgetown XIV
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
HABIT CURE..

By 3. N. WOOLLEY
III Atlanta, Ga. Reliable evidence given
~ and reference to cured patients and nv
sicians Send for my book on the Habit and
It's Cure. Free. anu
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
fLnanrial.
Riauus aud Oraaus.

pEATTV'c Organs, "a stops, 500: Pianos
DEHlI SS297 So Factory running day 1'I and
night Catalogue free. Address DANIEL, n,
BEATTY, Washington, N. ].
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
WESLEYAN FEMALE COLLEGE,

NAHUM VA.
r HE forty-fifth annual session will begin
1 October 4, 1882. The College is furnished
with ali modern appliances looking to health
happiness and comfort of its inmates I'm
surpassed advantages in Literature, Music and
Art at moderate rates. Apply for Catalogue
to REV. w. 9. BASS, President,
Or Rev C. W SMITH. Secretary
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
FRIDAY. July IA, 1882.
Q u -
ARRIVED YESTERDAY.
CLEARED YESTERDAY.

AhfLI ' ED YESTERDAY.
Steamer David Clark. Hallowes, Brunswick
Woodbridge & Hartman
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Shipping autfllig

MINIATURE ALMANAC-THIs DAY.
Sun RISES. sos
Sun SETS. 200
HIGH WATER AT FIT PULASKI SAB NJ, 7:O4 NJ
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Isrning News.
IUIY IA. 1882
.Earmtrdal
@tHWARKEF.

--- -rlRNTNG NEWS,
rt tl 1852, I p. ~
was ia li7ht dena-d TO-
Sales I'D bales. We
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14

,rislSSSe4gers by above schedule connso. IA
I'M TaEest6n JUNCTION with trains to and Sso az
rail BaV 1 anu nof fa ,s North and East via ali
~ Passengers by the 500 = 1 y, re-.
M tickets at Bren's office before :. is1
Inc depot ticket office aolu not be one, 20 p m
Co"''i'g Soa'th-Trains 40 and A.
Arrive Savannah -''''' 2,o9 m 4;0G n mn
,.a me s:OO train from Savannah and ~ m
Yernassea charleston, make no stSSs betSaa -.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1882-07-14
Sor Port Royal and BEAUFORT

I, t-o1 -. stttfCi0lS trains will arrive af D.. -
1oyt :. p a. II 20 "a instead of 9p m. and les
NJ For .'P Tga a. S:59 m instead Of 4 3 m.
and f,r tthtcSets. Sleeping Car Accommodate
81 5ul street. and at Ticket Offica saYa nfe:'
Siotioa ana Western Railway Denot
. Q. BoyLsToN. G.. r, A. SUPP
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-03-03

But that gentleman manifested no de-
sire for such an addition to his stock Of
domestic bliss.
..Indeed. mamma" reported Kath-
leen, II cannot get him beyond this:
4Cornelia can have . home with US, until
she gets one of her own. which hope
we may manage soon;' but he thinks II
will be far more agreeable and proper
for you to 90 back to Grandpa's."
.:Back to Grandpa's! bury myself in
that hole! III die frstr'
Nevertheless, she was obliged to 60.
with all her discomfort and rebellion,
back to the ''quite farmhouse, back to
the placid. loving old couple who. though
sorely Strengthened. cared for and com
forted her as best they could. What are
the years to teach her? The wonderful
years, so long, yet so swiftly flying
that heal so many wounds and bind up
SO many hearts, yet break 50 many, the
years that come and 60, laughing and
weeping, smiling and crying. that we
know not whether most to dread or long
for their coming-the rainbow years,
whose suns shines so often through q
thick rain of tears.
Ten have passed by. Cornelia Gregg
has not found her position as unsalaried
nursery-governess in her sisters house
particularly pleasant, but her wasted OPP
portunities leave her unable to do better.
Her mother is still at the old home. The
'plain maintenance has come regular
", but with no clue to the sender
whereabouts. tits more than year
since all the debts were paid, yet still he
does not come. She has hoped, watched,
yea! prayed. for his return; for her life
has shown its true face to her and she
realizes her folly-yet still she is alone:
The dear old father and mother have
gone home to Him who will cherish them
even as they did their erring, but at last
repentant, child.
Alone she sits in her old porch, in the
fading twilight of an autumn day. The
year is dying, she thinks, and SO are her
hopes. The stars flicker out slowly, they
are her only companions, save sad
thoughts. Is that step? She turns
it seems long to her, too, before the
manly figure reaches her, and she recOg-
nizes, though changed and worn, her
husband. Who can describe that meet
ing?
Later, they sit together. hand in
hand.
"My husband" she signs, after one Of
those long silences that so often occur in
the first reunion of long sundered
friends, "can you forgive my folly. my
recklessness, my cruelty, which made all
the past so hard for you, which in fact,
has cost you all these long years of sad
ness and labor?''
'.Do not speak of it," he answered,
gently; doubtless l. too, was in fault,
and, anyway, we all must learn the life
lesson that is best for us, for our own
particular weakness. I love to think
that the next life will show for what this
was to prepare for u.s."
''Now l have a comfortable and pleas
ant though not luxurious home for you,
and you will doubtless be content in it:
but how is it with our daughter, with
Cornelia? will she-shall we send for
her?''
'sTime has had its teachings, also, fol
her. I think she will be glad, and crate
full, too, to come"
And she was.-Arthur's Magazine.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-03-03
PLANTATION PROVERBS.

Nebbss spec ter dribe a mule jes' By twisun'
Nor to pick de lock OBJ Heasen Wild rusty
Nebber spen yo' idle moments loafn' roun' .
chicken rOOe
Less 20 mos, almighty sartin dat do bulldog
amt tied loose.
Nebber spec ter hive d chilaun wild . circus
Nor ter make . Christmas dinner OMEN La.
yeah's rabbit pie.
Nebber whittle ont 20 fortin' FUN de empty
Kass SesSeps s s.lus safss' vot kin STAN de
Allus cut de npes' clover wen de grass is damp
Allus sabe de viles' sinner bout de bes' camp
meedn pew.
Allus glib de weakly kitten al de healthy bull
Ailps a5sR d sansv stranger In de snusses
Nebber swim ecroas de bayou If de allisators
Kase he cuts de water faster dan de smartese
niggah kin.
Nebber az de lazy darky wen ter hoe de later
row:
Wen yer stsrtin' out ter trsbbel ride . critter
Nebber rest yer winters libin' on yer richer
nabOr'e word,
Kase de silver-troated bird may turn out .
mOckin'-bird.
'Taint de dog as barks de loudes allus makes
de TOUCHES fight, fr...
Nor de wind dat rattles wildes' allus brings de
coldes' night.
'Taint de fortyshillin' waistcoat kibers up de
trues heart,
Nor the loudes' color chrome talks about the
hhes art . saEr aE -
,'Taint de- thousan' dollar harness makes de
etiddy wu kin nag.
Nor de fiddle playin' darkey puts de cake meal
in the bag.
Settle all yo' little trubbles 'thout tho aid oh
court hus' law, 49,
Oryo'l fin 70 mouf Is holdin mo- dan 20 kin
ebber chaw.
Nebber eat de morrers breakfus' till de day
wen it is due,
Kase de mcmbrance OBJ de feastin' makes de
fastin' moughty blue.
j. Russell Fisher, IN N. o. Picaytlne.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-03-03

AT the Police Court in Philadelphia
some years since the Prosecuting Attor-
ney noticed, among the vicious crowd of
criminals, handsome, intelligent lad,
fifteen years old. Calling the Judges
attention to him they gave him q private
examination, and after consulting with
his employer. who had had him prose-
cuted for embezzlement, released him on
condition Of his going to live with his
uncle in the country. He has turned out
very respectable young man, and never
comes to the city without calling on the
Prosecuting Attorney and thanking him
for what he did for him. He said he is
doing very well, but declares if he had
been abandoned when cloud hung over
him he would have gone to the bad sure.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-03-03
SCHOOL AND CHURm.

-President Eliot sayy tAat, with stxice
economy, it costs shout ESQ . year to
be student At Harvard.
The teachers at Boston are petitioning
that female teachers who have served ten.
years shall receive . salary not les than
d, 200.
Nearly three fourths Of the churches
in the Episcopal Diocese Of Central Penn
sylvania have their seats free, or fly
nine out Of eighty-six.
BY the death of Captain John Brooks,
Of Bridgeport, Conn, the First Presby-
terrain Church Of that place has fallen
heir to the greater part Of his $50, 900
fortune.
The Tabernacle Baptist Church at
Nottingham, England, revise their list
of members every three months, and
members who have been absent for that
time without reason lose their member
ship.
"A professor of French in an Albany,
IN. Y.,) school recently asked . pupil
what was the gender OF academy. The
unusually bright pupil responded that it
depended on whether it was . male or
female academy.
"A professor in the college at Lewis
burg. Pa, held his place twenty-seven
years and was then discharged by the
trustees. He claimed tina: he was an
officer of the institution for life, remova-
BILE only by judicial proceedings, and
therefore sued for continued salary. The
Supreme Court has decided against him.
The entire teaching staff of the Col
lege of the City of New York consists of
q president, salary $500; twelve pro-
fessors. at a, 500 each, and one other at
$1,000; nine tutors, at o., 1875 each; five
others at 81 500 each; two others at ST.
200 each; one at $1,000, and one at $500.
Thirty-tw professors and tutors, at an
aggregate annual salary of $685.
Rev. John Kerr, Of Belfast, now in
this country, says there are 240 MethO-
dist ministers in Ireland who are living
on the smallest possible sum, and who
report 1900 conversions among the re-
suits oftheir last years work. The Meth
odists have two colleges on the island,
one of which is burdeDed with debt Of
$4,000. Mr.. Kerr speaks very highly
of the work of other Protestant denOmi-
nations in Ireland.
From Nebraska q new missionary of
the American Sunday School Union re-
ports to q lady and her class in Canaan
daigua, N. Y, the distribution of their
donation of ten dollars; part to Creigh-
ton Union Sunday School, which Is doing
all it can in new railroad town to pre-
vent the sale of liquor (Which may have
caused the superintendent house to be
set on fire, Dec, 18th); part to Limerick
Union Sunday-SchoOl, organized in .
settlement where he found only one
Christian family, but sixty children. be-
sides young people and adults; part to
Bethlehem Union Sunday School, organ
lied on Christmas day in very destitute
community. seven miles from any place
of worship; and part to Battle Greek
Sunday-School, in . settlement ten years
old, but which never had Sunday
School before.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-03-03
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

1t takes q bold man to roll his own
ideas into the world.
An old lady wants to know what is
meant by "mean time" Our watch
keeps it.-M =. Evening Post.
Why is the money you are in the
habit of giving to the poor like new
born babe !? Because its precious little.
The latest aesthetic slang the ladies
use when reproving their admiring gen.
tlemen friends is, You flatter too aw-
fully perfectly much.'
1t has got 50 now that the daily
paper is gradually usurping the place of
the sewing circle as disseminato1 of
news.-LotDeu Citizen.
What is the difference between an
old tramp and a feather bed !? There is
a material difference. One is hard up
and the other is soft dOwn.-NorTiskpo
Herald.
"A book-keeper for q Philadelphia
plumber rendered bill for S11O instead
of $1.1O, and the debtor came in and said
he would take his solemn affidavy that
the work wasn't worth q cent over $50.
-" Colonel" said man who wanted
to make out a genealogical tree, "Col-
onel, how can become thoroughly ac-
quainted with my family history ?"
'Simply by running for C0ngrsss," an
swered the Colonel.
When q mans hair stands on end,
an ordinary person says his hair stands;
but you can't get doctor to talk it in
that way. The doctor calls it horripila-
ton. This makes the hair stick up worse
than ever, but it gives the family conf
dence in the doctor.
While an Idaho girl was sitting un-
der tree waiting for her lover grizzly
bear came along, and, approaching from
behind. began to hug her. But she
thought it was Tom, and she leaned back
and enjoyed it heartily, and murmured
Tighter" and it broke the bear all up,
and he went away and hid in the forest
Tor three days to get over his shame.
"A young nobleman in q frightful
railway accident missed his valet. One
of the guards came up to him and said:
my Lord, We have found your servant,
but he is cut in two.'' law. is hep
said the young man, with . Dundreary
drawl, but with trace of anxiety de-
picted on his countenance, twill you be
good enough to see in which half he has
got the key of my carpet bagr'
When Farmer Bulge read that .
bull painted by Rosa BOnheur sold for
Is, 900, he remarked to his wife that he
didn't see how . coat Of paint could so
greatly enhance the value of the animal.
but If Rosa wouldn't charge more than
ten dollars he would get her to paint his
bull in the spring. And his economical
wife replied that she thought he might
paint it himself and save his ten dollars.
The indications are now that the bull
will be painted.
How beautiful is the exhibition of
humanity in the young. A little boy
found . poor half-frozen wasp in the
garnet and placed it upon chair before
the parlor fire to thaw out. When sister
Mary's beau called that evening he
glanced at the chair and seating himself
in it, murmured: "Ah, bless her heart,
how thoughtful she is of my comfortr'
Two minutes later there was as much
noise and racket in the parlor as if it had
been turned into a den Of demons. The
wasp had thawed out; that is why Mary
iaA't married vet