Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-03-02
Queer ''Newspapers.o -

It is evident that the popular idea of
what newspaper is does not consist
entirely with the Congressional con-
ception thereof. There are some re-
markable revelations on this point in
the report of disbursements made by
the Clerk of the House of Representa-
tives. Members of Congress are fur
nished with newspapers at the public
expense, the contingent fund being
drawn upon for this purpose. The
Clerks account of the use made of this
fund is published, and among the
newspapers" which he therein certi-
fies were bought for Congressman, we
take this curious list from the New
York Herald: Little Buttercup,
Little Tot" pretty Peggy" Fine
Grey Girls" LASS o. Lowrie's,"
"Chatterbox, pa Wonder Eyes" ,""Alice
in Wonderland" ""Lucile, Jack and
JILL" Boys of 49," "Young Mari
ners," Drifting Round the World"
g Bodley Af1oat," Wide Awake,n
"Under the Lilacs ~ "Under the Win
dow" ""Ups and Downs" Afternoon
Tea" "Odd and Even" Which
WINS" I'VE Are Seven" paul and
Virginia" "Swiss Family Robinson"
Royal Road" Robinson Crusoe,"
"Thaddeus of Warsaw" king Ar
thur" Lord Bacon" /" "Charles James
Fox, ""Arabian Nights, ,"'Endymion,"
"Zigzag Journey" "Esop's Fables"
" Home, Sweet Home" +" Cookery
Book, }" and "Errors of Speech"
While it may require Congression-
as newspapers, still the feat has been
performed, aud, it is supposed, to the
entire satisfaction of the performers.
The Clerk reports that from one to
dozen copies of these newspapers"
were purchased for various members;
and there may be some among their
constituents disposed to cautiously crit
Icise their selection of papers, but we
are not sure, after all, that it is not a
wise one. 1t may be peculiarly appro-
pirate that these great men should
avoid the highly seasoned columns of
the ordinary newspaper press-its sem
sations and ISLANDERS, its commonplace
dreariness, its personal asperities, it's
stinging if strained wit, it's biting criti-
cisms and divers other ch aracteristics
which tend to make the average news
paper perpetual thorn in the flesh of
the country's legislators. How wise
it is that they should rather turn from
these and bend their mighty minds to
innocent companionship and commun-
ion with Little Buttercup," Little
Tot" and Pretty Peggy" that they
should wander away from the weary
cares of public life with "Alice in Won
derland" or Jack and JILL" that they
should live over their boyhood days
with .."Young Mariners" or robin
son Crusoe;" that they should yield
their perturbed spirits to the soothing
influences of Afternoon Tea" or the
tender pathos of "We Are Seven,n that
they should add to their stock of knowl-
edge by studying Errors of Speech"
and exercise their intellectual powers
by tackling the intricacies of the Cook
cry Book" -.-.
But this queer list of newspapers
does not stop here. If it did, the public
might be willing to pass it by without
further inquisitiveness. In addition to
the above newspapers" there are nu-
merous others which are entered in the
Clerks official report, as follows:
''Three Bibles, two Testaments, one crib
bage board, one pair of razors, one whirligig,
one fan, one parcheesa, three poems, four
garlands, two dozen fruit knives, one dolphin
charm, one Worcester speller, one Leather
stocking Tales, two graphiscopas, one and a
half dozen illuminated bees, one odor case,
two sets of gems. one nest of trays, four doz-
en- japanned pincushions, one tobacco box,
sixteen games, four opera glasses, one ex-
change on opera-glass, and two Johnson's
Poets.'
1t is a little too much to expect the
people to pay for these articles, even as
newspapers, without at least II MUIR
mur. They might not object very
stubbornly to furnishing Worcester's
spoilers, and even fans, razors and
odor cases, but they don't exactly un-
derstand what under the sun a Con-
gresham wants with Bibles or Testa- |
ments; and when the bill comes in for
cribbage boards, whirligigs, garlands,
dolphin charms, graphiscopes and il
Illuminated bees, they think it time to
pause and ask to be at least satisfied |
that these articles are really newspa-
pers or that Congress is a very lively |
orphan asylum.-Louisvilte Courier
Journal.