San Marcos free press. [volume] (San Marcos, Tex.) 1877-1892, 1882-01-19
WIT AND WISDOM.

0OME men Will WOrk nhruer anu long,
err to plug up the hole in nickle than
to earn dollar.
IT is never too late to mend. Which
is why the cobbler never has your boots
done ut the time promised.
THIRTY TWO circuses are bleeding thi,
unhappy land. What tough time itis
those poor old jokes are having.
AN exchange says: ATLANTA is the
Chicago of the South" This is the
hardest blow that Atlanta has ever re-
ceived since General Sherman knocked
at her door. boston Courier.
CURIOSITY is sometimes easily salts
fed. III you want to know whether the
hornets are at home just tap with your
cane on the nest, and they will come
out and tell you!
This promises to be the grandes year
for Texas ever known. Its increase in
wealth and population and its progress
promise to astonish the world. Never
did the people us whole enter upon
new year with such brilliant prospects.
The reason they sent Hannibal Ham
lin to Spain was to get him where the
climate would permit of his indulging
his within of going without an overcoat
without his getting rheumatism to pay
for it.-BOStOn Post.
"WANT any species OF. cloves asked
a peddler of saloon-keeper one day
this week. "Vat for l want UNI asked
the proprietor. ITO take away the
smell of beer from the breath, exclaim-
ed the peddler. take away dot smell
of.beer?" exclaimed the man behind
the counter. "You got someding vot
makes de smell stay on, buy him."
In Arkansas when couple of ten
year-old boys are not ut home for sup
per, their mother looks troubled and
observes: "Now, where in the world
are them childred? If they are out
robbing trains again I'll take the hide
off O. them when they come home,
consarn them !"-Nowist0w'a Herald
ACTING Postmaster General Hatton
authorizes the ruling that no supple
ment containing any advertisements
can be allowed in mails at second class
rates unless the publisher makes aft
davit that the same rates are paid for
advertisements in the supplement- as
for those in the body of the paper.
The clock struck IL. Myrtle and
Billy were standing in the hallway, her
arms twined about him in the ecstacy
of love. "And you will love me always,
Billy?' Myrtle said softly. eyes my
precious one, forever and ever" "And
when shall we be married?" came in
low, dulcet tones from the girl, as her
head nestled confdingly above his iv.
er-pad. Now was Colonel Billy's long
editor opportunity. Two year before
Myrtle had laughed merry heartless
laugh when he had seated himself in .
pie at picnic. Drawing himself up
proudly he said, while q lemon-like
smile fitted over his clear cut features:
eyes, I will marry you Myrtle" But
when ?" pleaded the girl. when the
Washington monument is completed"
he answered and with hollow, mock
ing laugh, he fed into the darkness,
leaving her in the front hall, alone and
disconsolate.
JOHN Box is about six or seven years
of age, of an inquiring turn of mind. AZ
ter visiting menagerie with his uncle
and aunt, who were guests of Mr.. and
Mrs. Box, at the supper table they were
talking about the animals, when John
asked:
"Are bears dangerous?"
eyes" said his uncle, "they kill peo-
pie by hugging them to DEATH"
After meditating a moment, John
said:
"Then pa must be dangerous"
"What do you mean by that?" said
his mother.
Because I saw him hugging Bridget
this morning"
All smiled except Mr.. Box.
A TEXAS lady is gradually becoming
petrifed. Her feet and hands are al
ready as hard as stone, and when her
cheeks undergo metamorphosis she will
be fully competent to enter newspaper
Office, draw chair mp alongside the ed
itor and reel off the following legend:
IL have here an illustrated history of the
Patagonians four tulip engravings
in each number to be completed in sew
euty nine parts at fifty cents part
making three superb volumes worth
their weight in gold which no library
should be without and if you will put
your name here at the head Of my List
Ill furnish you the first three numbars
gratis and you give me little notice in
your paper and will You put down your
name ?"-Norristot11l Herald.
THr growth of Colorado during the
past year is upprecedentedin its history.
In Denver alone over $4,000,000 were
expended in the construction of new
buildings, and the total assessed valus-
1 -. ~ q :. A0E aEn M - :~--