Memphis daily appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1847-1886, 1882-09-17
MOTHER GOOSE
Ventures Upon the Turgid Sea Of Pol.
ities and Says Her Say in
Very Plain Way.
All the C0lors of All the Parties are to
Her Ahame With the Promise
Of Section and of Self.
For the Sunday Appeal

Oh SECTION anu Oh SELL
For the Sunday Appeal
Perhaps the prologue TO this paper should
be In form of an apology for presuming |
to entertain (much less express) any opinion |
at all on the subiect-matter of 1t, for, not |
withsta nding q certain cant of Hberality |
which is fashionable, the average man still |
regards it as safest and most comfortable for |
women to conine their cogitations to babies, |
bonnets and banbles. Perhapsthe epilogue to |
it will be in shape of an apology for the |
temerity that gives utterance to such foggy |
nonsense as a woman's structures on politics
are prone to be. Perhaps, again, the foggy
nonsense may crystalline into ideas if SUBJ
iected to the MONDAY radiance of criticism
"A contamination most devoutly to be wished.
If the word ''cant" may be used in its
most catholic sense, ss applying TO empty,
insincere or vapid utterances on any subject,
the politics OF our day undeniably have
their cant, and cant of any description Is
an offense to the good judgment and the
good taste of the better part OF mankind.
III one is a reader of the newspapers at all,
one must cram himself with q peppery diet
of politics, or else do as the poor country
man did who, having conscientiously gorged
himself half way through an elaborate bill
from thar to thar"
The political exhibit" displays such
wonderful revolutions in positions, such
marvellous fexibility of opinion, such start
ling inconsistencies have been condoned,
such queer things are said and done and
submitted to every day in places and among
those from whom the weightiest utterances
and the most conscientious perform anees
might have been expected, that those un-
! familiar with the true inwardness OF the
body polite are impelled to wonder and
stare and listen, and finally to ask, "Do
men hold opinions?" Are there any such
things as fixed and uualterable political
principles? Is there anything, after all, In
the periodically returning excitement over
this man or that? Is there any stabiliiH in
anvbody's platform, or are We alt ike SO
many BITS Of cofored glass in 4 huge kaleido.
scope that Time is twirling round and
about with remorseless hand for his own
amusement, with never pre-concerteo
plan, never q decided pattern, never GER
tainty of result and no possibility OF staoll-
ity? After all, are not mems politics very
much more matter OF circum-
stance and locality than their Pride
of reason makes them willing to
acknowledge? Are not you a Democrat,
Southern sir, for no better reason than be-
cauge your father was Democrat, and his
father before him, or because you were born
in locality and day when the name OF
Republican is associated with carpetbaggers
aud scalawags? Are not you a Republican,
Northern sir, from reasons just as himsy!
And do not both of you hold your Unborn
convictions" we'll in abeyanc until you have
carefully studied and thoroughly digested
the "ieader" of your favorite journal-the
guide, philosopher and friend that tells you
what he thinks and how to- vote?
Is there really any great irreconciiabie
antagonistic principle sustaining the rival
parties that necessitates the Periodlcai ana
cautious selection OF each individual plank
for the rival platforms? II there Is, why Is
| pounder on either side can never give seeker
| after light a clear, lucid and understandable
definition of tine difeeence between a good
Republican and a good Democrat, both 81
whom swear by all that's holy that the good
| of the country is the one selfish aim OF their
| existence. Emerson somewhere speaks OF
man as being divided into men, so that he
could help himself better, as the hand Is
divided into fingers. The modern politician
| has improved on that bit OF divine economy
| nv fusinp men into man-tha man a bolter
! Should il not be regarded as a chief disgrace
| in the world not to be unit, not 10 be reck-
| oued one character, not to yield that peculiar
| fruit which each man was created to pear,
| but to be content to be reckoned by the gross,
4
| or the section to which one belongs, and his
opinion predicted geographically with the
precision of signal Office report? Men,
| ssch as they are, very naturally seek money,
or power. as it's equivalent; but isn't it a
| triAe aggravating TO have them place their
| serambles for it on such high moral grounds?
1t used to strike terror into the heart OF
| this goose (when it had a young aud tender
heart inclined toward blind acceptance) to
r. Of au
| try was on the brink of ruin! 10 hear the
| eternal gods invoked to avert some fearful
catastrophe from US! To be told that chaos
was about to re.envelop the eartnI mat
universal upheaval OF the whole social fabric
was inevitable unless the men at our barbs-
| cue succeeded in seating the man OF their
choice in a certain chair, in q certain house
on certain day. Q'm not sure that l did
not 90 home and pray fervently for our chair,
and our choice and our barbecueD l used
| to tremble in view of the hatred and m alice
| that seemed to gather volcanic force and
vibrate with the success or failure of differ
emit sets of transpariencies pictorially dedi.
| Gated to that convincing you're another
sort>of argument.
But nv eauilibriHm was always restored
| by observing that whether our man or the
other barbecues man was put into that COW
| eted chair, chaos did not re-envelop the
! world. which continued to vindicate poor old
Galileo's obstinate declaration: ut still
moves" The sun, the moon and the eternal
stars performed their allotted tasks as Usual,
| and the threatened upheaval of the social
| fabric never even interfered with Easter bon
ne.s, Christmas bon-bons or any other OF
those charming frivolities so dear to the sex
| By ignorant but close following OF the
maneuvers as the press gives them to us, one
| is elated by the conviction that the only abb
solutely indispensable qualification TO The
| making OF 6rst-class politician Is to know
| how to use paint brush and whitewash
brush with delicate discrimination. The
| paint brush and pot of black paint for the
| other folks's man; the whitewash brush Tor
| your own man. Oh, yes, and there's another
| thing you will find it useful to remember
during a campaign. A pop-gun is pop
gup, and don't permit yourself to be fright
ened into mi.taking it for crack.o-doom
| All this is confusing, you see. Terribly con-
| fusing to predetermined wretch who grasps
eagerly for support at what is presumsbly 8
| well-built platform, erected by men OF cum
ming and skilled arti6cers, only to lind SO
many loose, Enthusiastically planks liable 10 be
blown higher than so many piles at the tlrs'
| variation of public breezes.
| Please note the humbly interrogatIye
| tenor of these remarks, and forgive them on
| the score of mental weakness which lncllnef
toward Stephen Blackfoois conclusion: Ute
all muddle." MOTHER GOOSE.