Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1882-11-17
Volume XXXIX.---Kc, %
Playing Comet.

SSAASe'
But, look a-here," says tn grocery
man, as he gave the boy little drie,,
up lemon, about as big as pr .ne,and
he told him be was terror. s:what is
the matter with your eye winkers and
your hair: They seemed to be burn
ed off"
ooh, thunder, didn't pa tell you Of
the comet exploding and burning us
all! That was the worst thing since
the flood, when Noar run the excur-
sion boat from Kalamazoo to Mount
Ararat. You see we had been reading
about the comet, which is visible at
four o'clock in the morning, and |
heard pa tell the hired girl to awake
him and ma up when she got up to set
the pancakes and go to early mass, so
they could see the critter The hired
girl is catholic, and she don't make
no fuss abont it, but she has got more
good, square relilgin than dozen like
pa. 1t makes good deal of difference
how relidgin affects different people,
don't it: Now pas rslidgin makes
him wild, and he wants to kick my
pants and pull my hair. but the hired
girls relidgn makes her want to aug
me, if | am abused, and she put SAN
archy on my bruises and gives me pie.
Pa wouldn't get up at four o'clock in
the morning TO go to early mass, un-
less he could take Il fish pole along,
and some angle worms. The hired
girl prays when no one sees her bat
God, but pa wants to get church full
of ssterin and pray loud, as though
he was an auctoneer selling Tin raz-
urS.
Well, when heard pa tell the hired
girl to wake him and ma up, [ told
her to wake me up about half an hour
before she walked pa up, and then |
got my chum to stay with me, and We
made comet to play on pa. You see
my room is right over pas room, and
got two lengths Of stove pipe and
covered them all over with phosphor-
Gus, so they looked just as bright as a
comet. Then we got two Roman can
dies and big sky rocket, and we were
going to touch off the Roman candles
and the sky rocket just as pa and ma
got to looking at the comet. didn't
know that a sky rocket would kick
back, did you? Well, you'd dide to
see that comet. We tied piece of
white rubber garden hose to the stove
pipe for tail and went to bed, and
when the hired girl woke us up we
laid for pa and ma.
Pretty soon We heard pas window
open, and Hooked oat, and pa and ma
had their heads aud halt their bodies
ont of the window. They had their
night shirts on ana looked just like
pictures of Millerites waiting for the
world to come to an end, Pa looked
up and seed the stove pi pc, and he said:
"Hanner, for Gods sake, Look up there
That is the damest comet [ ever seed.
1t is as bright us Gay. See the tail Of
it. Now that is worth getting up to
See."
Just then my chum lit the two Ro
man candles and | touched off the
rocket, and that's where my eye win
kers went. The rocket bursted the
joints of the stove pipe, and they fell
down on pa. but ma got her head in
side before the comet struck, and was
not hurt, but one length of stove pipe
struck pa endways on the neck and al
most cut biscuit out of him, and the
fire and sparks just poured down IN
9 his hair, and burned his nightshirt.-
Pa was scarf. He thought the whole
world was coming to an end, and the
window came down on his back, and
he began to sing. 'Earth's but des-
: ert drear, Heaven is my home
i, 81 seed he was caughtin the window
and | went down stairs to put out the
fire on his nightshirt, and put up the
window to let him in, and he said -
My boy, your ma and | are going to
Heaven, but | fear you are going to
: the bad place. and told him would
take my chances, and he'd better put
on his pants if he was going anywhere
that there would be liable to be ladies
present, and when he got his head in
: ma told him the world was not COM
ing to an end but somebody had been
setting off fireworks, and she said she
. guessed it was their dear little boy,
\ and when l saw pa feeling under the
bed for bed-slat | got upstairs pref
;, 1y previous, now, and don't you forget
il, and ma put cold cream on where
, the sparks burnt pas shirt, and pa
said another day wouldn't pass over
his head before he had me in the re-
= form school.
:, "WeIl, if go to the reform school,
/, somebody's got to pay attention, you
: can bet your liver. A boy can't have
u any fun these days without everybody
, thinks he is heather. What hurt
! did it do to play c'met:? It's ii mean
= 4 father that won't stand little scorch-
! ing in the interest of science"
!, The boy went out, scratching the
i place where his eye winkers were, and
. then the groceryman knew whatit WAS
y that caused the fire engines to be out
;, and around at four o'clock in the morn
u ing looking for fire.
S The greatest evidence of demoralizs-
ton is the reSpect to wealth