The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1882-08-31
DEMOCRATIC CONVENTION NOTES.

WYSSSNNM
IEe&
AS usual the tail attempted to wag the dog
but there was not life enough left for good
wiggle.
We were assured that our old friend Parker
Smith had started-but he failed to make it in
time.
Our young friend Harry French escaped one
He won't have to be baaten by q |
'nigger."
None of the delegations were full except Lick.
Not even delegate was full. 1t was bad day
for Democracy.
i. ''Get together!" yelled the chairman. But how
could that little squad get together in all that
big room?
Assoon as the Convention was organized,
the delegates" slid out for the jury room to see
about stuffing the hat.
One Democrat wanted to present Squire Ba-
ker with wig. But never mind, Powell will
snatch him bald-headed.
What in the world did they want with tellers,
when Olendorf could sit and count noses with
his lead pencil?
ave represent two thousand voters!" shouted
Baker. Well, that's not so bad-one delegate
to every five hundred voters.
Do Jim McClung and Billy Baker, and Henry
Olendorf, and Quin Branson, constitute the
Democratic party of Jackson county?
We noticed our old friend Tom Mcclure in
attendance. Tom has probably heard that there
is "nigger" on our ticket-and wants to catch
him.
1t appears that McClung and Olendorf are the
two bugs who elevate their latter "eends' and
propel the Democratic ball.
The handsome and Democratic countenance
of Jim Carr was not visible. Qr,ln looked lone
some-in fact, we all missed Jim.
In announcing candidates, McClung was par
ticular to speak of the reputation" of each.
Reputation is everything to Democratic office
seeker.
Henry Olendorf was chosen'permanent chair
man. 1t is said that he filled the chair but we
have not interviewed the janitor to find out
whether he did or not.
These men were nominated to run a ticket
of free beer and no Sunday" Is it a wonder
that most of the decent Democrats were asham-
ed, and staid away.
Every few minutes squad would retire to
the jury room. When they returned, Olendorfs
face would beam with joy at the thought they
had been safely delivered.
When Uncle Jo Wallace would come out of
the jury room, his face wore the expression OF
the small boy who hoped that his friends would
not find out the result fhis misfortune as long
as he kept quiet.
"EDUcAr1oN," says fetherenn, sis good thing
but there must be something to educate. To appeal
to the head ef many a man is like trying to get
street which is at the opposite end of the route
from YOU"
McClung thought the convention should have
a religious aspect SO he invited diminutive
gentleman from Israel to act as chairman. But
| the man pleaded his incompetency to run such
convention.
| At one time squad of dozen or SO came
filing out of the jury room with Quin Branson
and Uncle 10. Wallace at their head. Quin
looked like the foreman of a jury who were
pronouncing death sentence upon the Demo-
cratic party.
Esquire Baker wanted the delegates to gel. to-
gether and be counted. The first thing DEM
ocrat thinks of is guarding against "skulldug-
gerry" The chairman didn't have any rake, and
couldn't get them together.
While the teller was reading the ballots for
Recorder he labored, and sweat, and had a
great drop hanging to the end of his nose. 10.
| Andres said it reminded him of the story of the
good man who agonized in the Garden of Geth-
| semane.
When the name of Kearney was announced,
| man named Williams jumped up and moved
to select him by acclamation." That's the
only way they'll ever select" him. They can
never do it while Cherington is opposed to him.
AS we looked around and discovered the ab-
sence of Irve, and 60" and Levi, and other
| Democratic Moseses, we were reminded of an
inscription upon child's tombstone in the
Jackson Cemetery: ''Gone, but Not Forgotten!'
The chairman of one delegation asked leave
to retire with his delegation before voting.
"You1l vote right now!" yelled Olendorf. "But, u
eaid one, 1--WE have rules here" "You haven't
any rules TO keep me here till tomorrow morn
| ing!' yelled Henry, and the statesman was pu t
down.
Jos. Peterson asked leave to reconsider the
| vote of his delegation. "And the chair refuses
| to giant that privileged" said Henry, and down
went Peterson. Henry is not very old-but he
has learned that the only way to manage a
Democrat is by the party lash.
Jim Palmer was Secretary. We used to see
Jim in school, years ago, and when the teacher
would threaten to spank Jim and ourself, there
would peculiar smile play around Jim's
mouth. The same smile was there Saturday.
The master hands of year ago were not visi-
| BILE at this Convention" McClung was walk
| ing about the room. apparently lost, when a
Democrat told US he was looking for one of the
"ole stagers," to get advice what to do next.
When announcements for Infirmary Director
| were in order, and nobody seemed disposed to
| move, Olendorf shouted: SIS there any Demo-
crat that wants this officer" Henry knew there
were fifty Democrats in the county who would
gladly accept it If they had the chance.
Gould was not present. He was like the
man who chad the calf" certain sick man
was travelling, and sought lodging at a farm
house, and they had TO give him quarters in
the smoke house. A cow had just given birth
to calf, and fearing 1t might Freeze the farmer
put it in the smoke house, where'a fire was
burning. The sick man awoke in the morning,
saw the calf lying by his side, and sadly ex-
claimed: Its so It's a calf! And I had it!
But d-dif 1 don't leave it for somebody else
to take care of! And he slipped out and ran.
Thus were Olendotf and McClung left to suckle
Gould's calf.
Col. MENDALL CHURCHILL, of
GAINESVILLE, has been nominated for
Congress by the Republicans Of that
district. He was at Keystone Fur
mace when the war broke out, and re-
cruited the first company that went
for three years from Jackson county,
in the summer of 1861. He was chos-
en- Captain Of the company. There is