The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1882-05-23

a correspondent OF tho malc persuasio!
and OF matrimonlal inclination dropped
postal.card into tho Coirir.Jou,7lal post
office box the other day which contained
this apparently very simple question
"iow much will It cost to get mairrled?'
a very short conundrum, the reader vii
observe, but one which required deal o
space to answer, as is attestcd by this arti
Gle. The postal.card was turned over t
agood looking, girl.touched reporter, ant
he wus ordered to gcta full and complete
reply on pain OF having his salary cut dowp
10 low he could never hope to ask an,
woman to "go halvcrs" with him. For,u
natcly the young nun knew gentleman
now well advanced In years, who had been
married three times, more or less, and tc
him he went in his sorrow and told him
what waa wanted. I&
well, said the gentleman, who shall be
called Col. b., eve had some experience
In that business, and Il It is worth any.
thing to you 1t Is yours free OF cost"
The young mans eyes filled with CRATE.
ful tears, aud he silently laid his hand in
that Of his kind.hearted' friend, aud said
with sob: '-1&g -. g7E,1T17
TELL me about it." lg rs
what do you want to know" e.
Everything, everything, SO the postal
card iiend may get full safety" 5.I
"All right, here goes. was married
four times, and | have in my desk over
there rcccipted bills for all expenses Incl.
dental 10 each OCCASION" ~.
:. Good" said the reporter, Figures wont
lie, and am your slave forever, and will
ply for the beer next Friday after The
ghost has walked. I'm little short Just
now, because bet on the fl vortes with
last weeks retnrns, and they failed Ia
materialize, rs It were"
Don't mention it, I've been there, but
let's to business. As II have said, I,haye
been married four times. The first time
was forty.fve years ago, when was Young
and green, and hadn't n dollar but what
! borrowed and the girl didn't have INV
more than ! did, so it was necessarily /,
poor mans wedding. Let me sec (reach.
Ing in the desk for the papers,, here's the
bill. l find here tho following i,emized
account: One suit OF clothes ready-made,
$40; shoes, s. so; shirt, IS cents hat, 81 +;
yarn socks, knit by mother, no charge; no
collars, no cuffs, no neckties, no button
hole bouquets, no gloves, no carriage hire j;
license, s.; preacher, 50 cents in money
and four bushels Of apples no present to
the bride, and no anything else so fur rs
cn remember. Total, SIG Is aud four
bushels OF apples"
Cheap enough" said the scribe; "but
10 they do it that cheap now?"
Yes; plenty CT them, and some OF them
cheaper, but my wife and were pretty r..
spectacle young people, ii we were poor,
and we thought we were putting on con.
siderable style"
"Oi course; but how was it next time 2"
The next one took place ten years later,
and l was Il little better off in the world
and was clerklng in store ut $40 Il month
Ny bills on that occasion show the follow.
ny result: One suit OF clothes, S35; boots,
=; two shirts, Il only wore one, however,,
s. 90; hit, s.; gloves, fifth cents; necktie,
twenty cents; collar and cuffs made on the
shirt without extra charge; license, s.;
preacher, 81 so in gold; present to the
bride, gold breastpin, s.; cotton socks
fifteen cents; no carriage hire; no wedding
trip; total, S43 S."
THAT looks little heavier"
YES; but it is about an average, and
the thing is done daily now at similar
outlay"
How was it on the third round?"
"Wcll, that didn't occur until fifteen
years later, and was q partner with about
81, ECO or 81 800 a year, and was rising
young merchant. OF course l was called
on then to put on considerably more style,
and the bills show up correspondence as
follows: Suit OF clothes, SO: underwear,
$40; boots, $40; hat (pIug), Sc; gloves, S.;
necktie, 81; button.hole bouquet, % cents;
wedding ring $50 and present to bride,
Jewelry (Se5}, $50; carriage hire, $40; Ii.
cense, s.; preacher, $40 lin gold; Incl.
asntals, $l5; short bridal trip, slo0; total,
"llun," said the reporter, thouehtiullv,
that style costs little more, doesn't it,"
Yes, they come high, but we must have
them, and j! is no more than is ordinary in
that station" W. s. j
But what arc the incidcntals specified
in the bill p - 80
"oli, that includes variety OF unex-
pected items man has 10 meet on holt
day occasion like u wedding, and c..l.not
be definitely enumerated. You will see
what it means when you get there, but il
you get married in q real quiet why you
can avoid much OF it,"
Thanks for the advice. Now for the
fourth CALL" -
"rhe fourth event happened Mt only n
comparatively recent period, when had
become bloated bond.holder, us it were,
or, to put it milder. rich man. married
4 young wife, rs most OF us old fellows do,
and she wanted me to cut q swathe, 50 the
bill was heavy. The tlsur:s were thus
wise: Clothes, from the skin out, hat and
boots, Sl25; gloves, 81 80; neck,ie, 81 so,
me finest in the market; boutonniere,
Alareclal Neil rosebnds, etc, 81 so ;
carriage hire, trademarks and 9th.
ess, $50; license, 81 so (price
charged by statuary enactment, preacher,
50; janitor at the church, s.; gloves and
bu,ton-ho!e bouquets for usher, $40; wed.
ding ring (Sl0) and present to the bride,
diamonds $500, $40; incidental, so;
bridal trip, $500, to which must be added
Il suit Of travelling clothes and extras
amounting to 500 more, and we have a
total Of Sl,1l3 80"
Good Lord" gasped the reporter, chow
can a poor young man ever climb hill
like that ?"
"Ele can't, my dear" replied the sympa.
.hizing old gentleman, "but he can wait
nnlll he is rich old man, then try it. But
that isn't anything to some OF them.
know OF one man whose actual wedding
outlay was 5000, and he was n plain
American citiz n. Foreigners, you know,
overgo that, but they have such IN enor.
nous amour. OF extras" :
"Sow, you've told me the cost to man,
how ~ IS it, state it briefly, on the other
"Gor the women, do you mcan9"
Eyes"
"Well, there's no telling. Ny first wiie's
dress cost s., and it was q mighty pretty.
looking piece Of goods, too. suppose hel
~ Nnr II xt,,rac &-,nr,. ,rartI, ,,av. hot