davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
A MISSISSIPPI BALLAD.
BURDETTE.

A deck hand on steamer lay doing, foil OF
beer;
There was lack OF disposition of his work to
do his "sheer,"
But the mate came up beside him and whs.
pered in his ear,
"Turn out, you blank blank blank OF a blank!
big freight pile is near"
The smoothing deck hand grunted, then muttered
It his fate,
And then raised up and scratched his head and
answered to the mate:
"Look here, old man, Pm awful tired; I want
to draw my pay,
And go back to Keokuk--Keokuk, loioay."
.'rm blanked if you do, the mate replied, ''you
blank blank blank of blank.
II you don't turn out pretty blank blank fast,
I'll club you into blank"
The snoozng deck hand faltered, then NUT.
tered "This is tough;
But don't believe he'll hit me though his Ian
guage is so gruff."
Mistaken man! Why sleep again? The mats
went off, tits true,
Bot slyly slipping back again, the sleeper me-
his view;
And lifting up his awful cane, without one wore
to say,
He knocked the deck hand to Keokuk-Keo
kuk, IO,cay.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30

ments, which he seldom omitted to bring
forth while l remained with him. At
that time the earldom of Crawford and
Balcarres was in allegiance. 1t was one
of the dormant peerages of Scotland,
which not infrequently give work to the
house of lords; and claimant to the
title and estates was reported to be even
then gathering documentary evidence
wherewlth to enforce his plea. advised
Crawford to relinquish these parchments
if, as he often told us, Lord Lindsay was
buying up all such writings. But the in
variable reply was, 81 am John Crawford,
Balcarres, with as good right to this
peerage as any man living. If were not
SO poor and so incapacltated by illness, l
should myself prosecute the claim.
Though cannot do this, shall, for the
sake of this boy here pointing to his son, J
retain these documents, whatever price
may be offered for them.'' The
claim had not then been brought be-
fore the house of lords, nor was it pub
licly heard of until some time after the
death CT John Crawford. One remarka-
BILE expression, which fixed itself upon my
memory from the earnestness with which
ltiwas repeated by Crawford, was: ''Let
him die whenever he may, he will not
rest in his grave"
The boy, who heard these words again
and again, and who, as have said, was
an attentive and interested listner, is
now, if he be IN existence, man OF
five fifty. l have not the smallest
knowledge of his career, having entirely
lost sight of him when his father died.
But the circumstances are as wildly i'm
pressed on my memory as if they
were fresh and recent. Of course l am
only theorizlng when say that the lad
was, by appearance of physiognomy, just
one of those determined plodders COM
mon enough in Northern race, who
setting themselves to difficult end
rarely fail to reach it. He may be at this
time a prosperous merchant, but if this
be only vague speculation, it is more to
the point to say that those parchments
are still in existence somewhere, and that,
if they can be discovered and authenti-
Gated, they may possibly aid in solving
this painful mystery.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
Solid Comfort.
Toledo Americana

II don't see how I'd git along with
out Mary, nohow," Mrs. Butcher OBJ
served, pausing to wipe the perspiraiion
from her aged features and put another
ladle of soft soap into the steaming suds,
while her daughters voice at the piano
could be distinctly recognized, floating
out from the adjoining parlor; II don't
see how I'd git along without that gal,
nohow. APays on these days. when I
hev the tiringest work, she Jest picks
out her incest pieces, like Sweet rest by
and by, and Mothers growing old, and
sings 'em fur me afore she goes out on
the lawn to play croquet with the other
young folks. faint every gal as nd be
so thoughtful, kin tell you. Now,
most on 'em I'D jest bang away with
Jordan is q hard road to travel or
s'Whoop 'em up, Eliza jane but she
amt none O. that sort. She's a pile O.
scomfort to me-a pile O. comfort" and
Mrs. Butcher famed herself vigorously
with her soiled apron, preparatory to
running the clothes through the second
water.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
Seipio,s offender Relations,

A negro presented himself at the desk
of the Cincinnati marriage-license clerk
the other day, and asked for license to
marry his Dulcinea. Among other prob
lens propounded him was
care you and the lady related?"
eyes, sab, was the answer.
"What relation are you to each
other?" was. the next query.
"Sah ?" CALCULATED the applicant for
matrimonial honors.
81 mean what kin are you to
each other?" explained the hand
some clerk.
"We isn't any kin to each other
no kin at ALL" responded the citizen of
Ethiopian descent.
"But you said you were related" an
swered the clerk.
ct thought you deluded to the tender
relashuns of luv what prevails between
us at de present moment" said Scipio;
SO he got his license.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
MIR. 10 COSE.

Run over himself: The best descrip-
ton we have ever heard Of slow man
was that he was too slow to get out Of his
own way.
Old saying: ~ have divided my sub-
ject," began the parson, ''into two
heads.'' 1.-TWO heads with but single
thought whispered Fogg to Mrs. F.
and then he closed his eyes for his usual
nap.
Conversation overheard in horse car;
"When you call for beer do you say
"A glawce of Bawse' or "A glass Of Bawce'
or "A glawce of Bass or merely "A glass
of Bass9'" 81 don't say either. | say,
'One beer"
One of the Oscar Wilde agonies: A
new agony is for young lady to buy a
thirty-s six cent tambourine, paint sun
flower in one corner of 1t and pond lily
in another and hang it up on the wall as
decoration This signifies: cart and
music have joined hands, let 'em jingle"
A reasonable lover: eyes, he said to
his confidential friend, 81 am engaged to
her and suppose ought to be very hap
by, but somehow am worried about a
former attachment of hers. There's that
Internal BLACKBOARD, Jones, who
"Why, bless my soul! You stupid fellow,
she hates him like poison" Eyes, yes,
I knOw-that's what troubles me. She
hates him too bitterly not to have loved
him once
You can always Judge tailor by the
make he wears, and potter by the ware
he makes.
If you want to know what new books
20 airn,,1ofirr ihra rv O nd
try to borrow them.
Lacking confrmation.-The report that
the remaining banks of Newark will i'm
port Egyptian mummles for directors.
There is no authentic case on record of
Niagara hackman having gone over the
falls. In fact the falls are absolutely
good for nothing but to lovk at.
The wages of laborer in Russia are
eight cents for a days work of fifteen
hours, and he ''fnds'' himself. 1t is not
stated where he finds himself at the end
of the month, though.
GA Sad Tragedy is favorite head
line with an esteemed contemporary
The adjective serves to distinguish such
catastrophes from the joyous tragedies
which make picnic OF this mortal life.
A few days ago youthful Zulu of
about IL summers, named Pea Blossom,
was convicted of stealing in Galveston
court, and sentenced to imprisonment in
the county Jail. "He is rather young to
steal, l should suppose" remarked by
stander to Uncle Moses. "No, sab, he is
not too young to steal, but he is cotched
little earlier den the rest OBJ 'em, OATS
all'
An acquaintance from the country,
having visited some friends, and being
about to depart, presented little boy,
one of the family, with half dollar, in
the presence of his mother. "Please, is
it good one?" asked the little fellow.
"Of course it ISL replied the gentle
man, surprised, "Why do you ask?''
because, I'd rather have bad one, and
then they'll let me keep it. If get any
good money it goes into the bank, and
never get it again"
Said Mrs. S., who had come to spend
the day, to little Edith: care you glad
TO see me again, Edith" Edith-"Yes,
MN, and mammals glad, toop' Mrs. s.
"Is she?" Edith--"Yes, MN; she said
she hoped you'd come to-day, and have 1t
over with"
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
Recommendations of Health journal.
foote's Health Monthly.]
Try popcorn for nausea.


Foote's Health Monthly.]
Try popcorn for nausea.
Try cranberry for malaria.
Try sun bath for rheumatism.
Try ginger ale for stomach cramps.
Try clam broth for weak stomach
Try cranberry poultice for erysipelas.
Try gargling lager beer for cure OF sore
throat.
Try a wet towel to the back of the
neck when sleepless
Try swallowing saliva when troubled
with sour stomach.
Try eating onions and h0rseradlsh to
remove dropsical swellings.
Try buttermilk for removal of freckles,
tan and butternut stains.
Try the Group tippet when child is
likely to be troubled in that way.
Try hot flannel over the seat of neu-
ralgic pains, and renew frequently.
Try taking your cod-liver oil in tolna-
to catsup if you want to make II palaia-
BILE.
TRY hard cider-a wine glassful three
times a day-for ague and rheuniat-
ism.
Try taking nap in the afternoon if
you are going to be out late in the even
ing.
Try breathing the fumes of turpentine
or carbolic acid to remove whooping
cough.
Try cloth wrung out from cold wa
ter put about the neck at night for sore
throat
Try snuffing powdered borax up the
nostrils for catarrhal .'cOld in the head.''
Try an extra pair of stockings outside
of your shoes when travelling in cold
weather.
Try walking with your hands behind
you if you find yourself becoming bent
forward
Try silk handkerchief over your face
when obliged to go against cold, pierre
ing wind.
Try planting sun1owers in your gar
den if compelled to live in malsrial
neighborhood.
Try a newspaper over the chest, be-
meath your chest, as chest protector, in
extremely cold weather.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
The Camel and the Needles Eve.

The passage from the New Testament,
cit is easier for camel" etc., has per-
picked many good men, who have read
it literally. In Oriental cities there are
in the large gates small and very low
apertures, called metaphorically "need-
les eyes" just as we talk of windows on
shipboara as "bull's eyes" These en-
frances are too narrow for camel to
pass through them in the ordinary man
ner, or even if loaded. When loaded
camel has to pass through one of these
entrances, it kneels down, its load is re-
moved and then it shuffles through on
it's knees. Yesterday" writes Lady
Duff Gordon from Cairo, Z" I saw camel
go through the eye of a needle, that is,
the low arched door of an Enclosure. He
must kneel, and bow his head, to creep
through; and thus the rich man must
humble himself"
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
MUSICAL MERCHANDISE
IMPORTANT IMPROVEMENTS.

Messrs. Dyer & Howard have just received
from the factory several new styles of their
Upright Pianos, containing two very i'm
portant improvements. One of them con-
sists in q very neat and ingenious MCKEE
plated pedal guard, and the other an extra iron
frame on the back of the piano; in addition to
the one in front of the sounding board. This
extra frame makes it next 10 impossible for
the plano to get out of tune, and adds another
important elementof excellence to the already
celebrated Dyer & Howard pianos. The in.
struments may be seen and examined at their
ware-rOOms,
l46 and l6O East Third Street.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
Married on tbs ttdge.
Indianapolis Journal

POIIo UOtIIHdI.J
The papers have daily contained ac-
counts of marriages in various unusual
places-up in a balloon, in Mammoth
cave and others, but 1t remains for In
dianapolis to secure o mortgage On the
cake, so to speak, in matter of this kind.
Last night the house bill at the Zoo variety
theater contained the following an
uouncement in the middle of the pro-
gramme: "The marriage ceremony OF
Mr. Frank MefrOse and Miss Kitty Kerr
viii now take place" The house
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30

There are 1000 American students in Ger
many. and they spend, it is estimated, 81, 500
600 annually.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
an -Esfhetic |acitdtiOn.

If Mr.. Oscar Wilde will leave his lilies
and daffodils and come west, to Clncin-
natl, we will undertake to show him how
to deprive thirty hogs of their intestines
in one minute.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30

One of the prettiest fancies for evening
dresses for ladies is of white tulle over
slip OF white or cream satin. Deep box
plating of the tulie edge The skirt,
basque and neck, and tic entire vest
front is filled in with tube IA ped at he
waist with two narrow bands OF the
satin.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30

IT must be source of great comfort
to travelling men to reflect that order. is
Heavens first law.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
III aims Opern Co,rpas.n

The appearance of III. B. Mains comic
opera company at the opera house, for
three nights and matinee, the ensuing
week, will no doubt prove the brilliant
musical event of the season. The COM
pany has received hearty recognition
throughout the principal cities of the
country and they are heralded as the
acknowledged musical attraction of the
year They open on Thursday evening
with the presentation Of Won Suppe's
popular opera of tBoccaccio," the scene
of which abounds in bright and sparkling
music, while the plot affords fine oppor-
tunity for good acting.
The opera of "Boccaccio' will be pre-
sented with the following fine cast:
Boccaccio, d novelist and poet Flora Barry
Leonetta, bis friend, student. Rose Leighton
Fiametta, L ambertuccio's adopted daugh-
ter ...... ......... Marie Perry
Pietro, PRINCE of Palermo. =. Percy j. Cooper
LotteringhI, a cooper. .....--..... Ellis Ryse
Isabella, Lotteriughi's wife - Marie Reynolds
Lambertuc5io, grocer =. Harry Buckingham
Peronella, I4amhertuccio sister,.
......... ............... Mrs Ellis Ryse
Scala, barber ........ Vincent Hogan
Beatrice, Sca)z4's daughter Martha Campbell
Fatelli, a bookseller ............ Fred Condit
Checo, a be ggar. Sydney Barnes
Eresco, the cooper's apprentice; Harry Dale
The Unknown. Henry Van Hout5n
Major Domo of the Duke. H. Arthu:
Donna Joncofere. ...........M May Hill
Eliza, Donna Joncofere's servant girl -.
...,..... ..Abbie Nicholson
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30
Death sentence COMMITTED.

DENVER, Col, Jan. 27.-The governor TO-
day commuted the sentence of w G. Kn cwlt g,
who was to have been hung February 4, for
murder of Geo. E. Lyons, at Sarg ut, To i'm
prisonment to life.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-01-30

impossible TO notify all in time
that the reception would not be held
The explanation is that Wilde and Archi-
bald Forbes quarreled on the train, and
that in consequence Wilde refused to
stop at Baltimore, where Forbes was to
lecture on the 10Th, and went on to
Washington.
1t is not considered wise to make re-
marks about roast ducks in the presence
of Manager Hoeley, of Chicago. A few
nights ago Mr.. Hooley concluded that
duck would be nice thing for dinner
the following day, and accordingly pur-
chased bird. While engaged in CONVEX
sation with some friends at down town
restaurant DR.. Quinlan substituted a
property duck, which he had secured at
the theater, for the genuine article, and
Mr. Hooley faithfully carried it home.
He brought it back the next day, how
ever
L-.te Dublin papers tell funny story
of some mishaps that occurred at Mr..
Bouclcauls's benefit there just before his
departure for this country. The play
was 'sThe Colleen Bawn' In the cavern
scene Ely disappeared beneath the waves
in the orthodox fashion, but failed to re-
appear, and the play came to astandstill
The goods" became highly impatient and
indignant, and finally MIR. Boucicault had
to appear before the curtain and explain
that as trap had failed to work at the
critical moment, the rescue of the heroine
would have to be Indefinitely postponed.
Mr. Piercy was married only few
years ago to California lady, whose
father offered the actor $40, 200 to settle
in San Francisco, but he brought his wife
East, where she contracted typhoid fever,
died, and left the poor actor with W ung
child The father travelled sorrOwfully
back to the Golden Gate, and left his baby
with his father-in-l law. During his en-
gagement with Booth he had been very
melancholy, and spoke frequently of his
only object in life-the accumulation of
little fortune for his child. Poor fellow,
the dread hand of disease has stayed the
progress of his intention, but the baby is
well provided for, and the actor "after
LIES fitful fever sleeps wen.''
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
A NJ r trimoni8I Policy.

Several months ago society of leading
men in Knoxville procured charter and
conducted comparatively new enterprise,
for the assistance of young people at time
when most needed, viz: the time of mar
riage. Alex Allison, Esq, was chosen
secretary, and H. H. Taylor fills honorably
the position of president
The success of this institution is proven
by the rapid growth, and by the numerous
other similar societies. From Mr. Allison,
the secretary, we learn that the Knoxville
Marriage Benefit Association is not only do
ing splendidly at home, but is branching
out over this State, and even into the heart
of sister States, where agents are doing a
good business for themselves and blessing
the young people.
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
No Cure for Consumption.

There is no cure for consumption, wheth-
or of the lungs, bowels or kidneys; yet the
patient may be spared to long years of fife,
and the fatal termination kept from ap-
preaching, if Browns Irons Bitters are
used. This medicine strengthens the weak
ened parts, restores to healthy action the
impaired functions, and stops all decay and
wasting away of the organs affected 1t
is the best life giving medicine ever invent
ed, and thousands of living witnesses stand
ready to affirm the truth of this assertion
A trial bottle will convince you of its
merit,
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
A Noted Woman.

The item in regard to the failure of
"Yours for health, Lydia E. Pinkham," of
Lynn, Mass, which has been floating
through the papers, we are glad to learn is
false in every respect, as we found on in
curing at Hubbard's International News
paper Agency of this city. The Lynn Bee
said few days since: "The Lydia
Pinkham Compound Business is not finan-
cially embarrassed as reported, but is being
conducted on a much larger scale than ever,
doing a large and growing business and
paying one hundred cents on dollar" Mr..
Hubbard has whole charge of the advertis-
ing of this and other similar large houses,
and informs us that he has inserted her adj
vertisements on yearly contracts in over
5000 newspapers last year, so that she is
to-day the best known woman in America.
New Haven Sunday Register.
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
Prices Union Street
I'LL I'D u - e.
Base Ball Notes.

The Martin Condons Base Ball Club have
been challenged by the Blevins Boys, of
Rogersville, to a match game of base ball.
The Blevins wanted to play next Tuesday,
but the Condons can't play at that time,
and have agreed to play them here Satur-
day, August II.
They have also received an invitation and
challenge to Memphis in August, and have
agreed to go the 25th and Goth to play two
games with the Eckfords there.
The club has received a valuable addition
in the person of John Reeder, the reliable
second baseman. They will practice Mon
day, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday of this
week
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
Attention, Grain Dealers!

Realizing that the wheat crop of East
Tennessee is the largest that we have had
for several years, Coffin, Mckinney & Co.
have laid in large supply of bags for the
use of grain shippers. These bags were
bought low, before the rise in the price,
consequent upon the large wheat crop took
place-and they are offered lower than the
same article can be sold by any one in the
trade. Those who need grain sacks will
find it to their interest to call and examine
their stock and prices.
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
PENEILETTES.

Nashville had % deaths lest week, II
white and<l7 colored.
Hon. D. NJ. Key, Postmaster General,
of Chattanooga, has gone to Washington to
testify in the Star Route cases.
Mr.. Lewis T. Baxter, United States Court
clerk at Nashville, has gone TO Long Branch
to spend portion of the heated term.
The penitentiary at Nashville has been
Guaranteed against smallpox, and no Wis
itors are to be admitted until further no
tice.
College Stock For Sale.-One share
of Goodman's Business College stock for
sale. Address,
J. A. MCALLEN, city.
The SCOTS. of Chattanooga, met with an
other defeat last Saturday, at the hands of
the Huntsville, Ala, base ball club, III a
game played at the latter named place. The
score was ID to II.
We understand that the friends of Judge
Moses are going to run him for Justice of
the Peace in the 18th district. Judge
Moses has not announced himself, but
placed himself in the hands of his friends,
and they are going to press his claims.
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
Richards' House

At divers Springs, is now ready for guests,
and cottages for visitors wishing to board
themselves, will be rented on reasonable
terms. The hack will run on Tuesdays and
Saturdays, oftener if needed, from Vests
livery stable On Prince street.
Terms for board will be made reasona-
BILE. JOSEPH RICHARDS,
july27-dtf Proprietor.
Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1882-08-01
Ugly Cans

In that row which of all others should be
kept in thorough repair, a row of teeth, are
sure to occur and no less sure to hopelessly
disfgure the face if disregard of the teeth's
cleanliness is persistent. But if the error is
corrected in time with the aid of 5000
DON'T, Americas leading tooth beautifier
and invigorant, the tenants of the mouth
long retain their strength and VIII iteness un
impaired