Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1882-07-17
NEWSPAPER WAITS.

!
An only child is single heir occurrence.
[Marathon Independent.
Follow my Leda, was one of Jove's
little games Boston Commercial Bull
| etin.
The fly is happy thing. and goes about
trying to tickle everybody. -[Dayville Sun
beam.
Quite so.-The spell is broken. The
hand write is on the wall.-[Iowa Anti
Prohibition Circular.
The halter who introduced the fawn.
colored beaver hat is another instance
where thrift may follow fawning. y Boa.
ton Commercial Bulletin.
II you would bring up child in the way
he should 60, parents should be careful and
not let the lad see the way they go them.
selves. Il Whitehall Times.
The effect of bad example is often notice.
able IN small cigar stores. When kerosene
lamps are used they almost invariably
smoke Philadelphia News.
Charles Call. from Maine, was swindled
out Of thirty five dollars before be had been
two hours in Boston. He is now mourn.
ing Cau.-IBosto Commercial Bulletin.
Clipped dried beef is selling at 40 cents
a pound. Pine shavings, which can be got
for nothing, are almost as palatable and
quite as nutritious. Philadelphia News.
The constant use of the telephone, it is
SAID, will cause deafness. The man who
has to use it continually is to be congratu.
lated upon his deafness.-[ Boston Tran
script.
On the resolutions being put, heard =
young lrlshman tell his companion, with
genuine satisfaction, that "they were car
rled anonymously, begorra. "-[St James
eyes, said the wife of Congressman,
my husband really has an attack of the
malaria. But don't mention it, or every.
body will think he's on big drunk. y
Boston Post.
For the primer See the man and his
wife. How angry they look. Will she
throw the plate at him? The plates are
nearly all gone. Would you like to get
married ?-[Louisville Courier Journal.
An exchange in speaking of child that
had been poisoned, reports that young
physician was called in, and follows with
this dubious compliment: "The child,
strange as it may seem, is likely to re.
cover.-[Scranton Republican.
DIR. Elliott Coues' new list of the birds
OF North America mentions SSS species.
Only about 500 we're known in Audubon's
time. 1t should be remembered, however,
that the microscope was not discovered III
the latter gentleman's day, and conse-
quently quail on toast had not yet been
discovered. III onkers Statesman.
Naif.-It will take some time, we sup
pose, to get men out of the habit OF shoot.
ing at each other with or without rule and
regulation, when they have or fancy that
they have serious cause of offense, but we
can at least deter them from settling their
quarrels in way that puts quiet citizens
in our busy streets in peril Charleston
News and Courier.
The man who had made a big thing by
giving burlesque show in the Immediate
vicinity OF Yale and Harvard Colleges,
took a troupe with ballet of men to the
town where Vassar College is located,
and does not quite understand
why he didn't capture the students.
-[Boston Post. The humor of such
an exhibition would have captured them,
if nothing else would, if it had not already
become settled fact that the female sex
cannot appreciate humor.- Folio. Don't
quite know about that. Wait till woman
sees you the victim of practical joke and
see if she doesn't laugh.-IBoston Post.
A fnanz-baron in Berlin came to a
tailor one day to get pair of trousers.
He found piece of cloth of an un.
usual pattern, which suited him admira-
bly,. Have you sold any of this yet p no
asked the tailor, who replied in the mega
tive. "Then 1 will take pair, said the
baron but 1 don't want any one else
to wear the same kind" The tailor
timidly suggested that 1t was large
piece OF cloth, and he could not afford
to throw IL away a. How many pairs
oi trousers could you make OF it? The
tailor consulted his books and replied.
eighty-three "Weli, I'll take them ali. -
[Frankfurter Zeitunr.