The National tribune., 1882-06-24
The Broom Drill.


We observe, with a certain sense of salts
faction, that genuine martial spirit has at
last taken possession of the female mind.
Satiated with the dull pursuits Of the kitchen.
the se"ing-roOm, and the nursery, the women
Of America have essayed d Ioftier task. Fired
by the example of their warIike brothers,
they have undertaken the Broom Drill!
We are not, as yet, proficient in the man.
ual of brooms as practiced by the ladies
of the land, but we can, perhaps, convey to
our readers some idea of its general charac-
ter. In the first place then, be it understood,
a company of rosy-cheeked damsels is re-
cruited from the ranks of some Sunday school
that happens to need new library OF organ,
or something of the sort, and q rendezvous
having been determined upon, brooms ara
issued to the members, and the drill-naster,
armed with q feather duster, proceeds to in
struct them in the manual. In order to
facilitate the execution of difficult evolutions,
the young ladies wear their skirts rather
short, and when they have donned their
jaunty red caps they present almost as fierce
an appearance as the celebrated Louisiana
Tigers. We have never had the pleasure of
witnessing one of these broom drills, but we
understand they are very thrilling. The
exhibition is usually given on an improvised
stage IN the Sunday room, and in the
very teeth of the enemy-that is to say, the
young men who occupy the front benches.
Present broomsi Imagine the spIendor of
the spectacle-ths white handles glistening
in the gas light, and the serried splints ouiy-
ering above them! Shoulder brOoms! Is it
not beautiful maneuyre? See how tightly
each heroic soul clutches the butt of the
weapon, and what dangerous sparkle there
is in each eye! Right shoulder shift brooms!
A clean sweep and no mistake-nOt a single
cap left On the lovely heads in the rear rank!
All this, however, is but preliminary. Wait
until the order comes to load and fire. 4
piercing shrek runs through the audience
as each piece is leveled at the enemy. 1t is
not the first time, as husbands know to their
cost, that a broomstick has done terrible
execution
The broom drill must certainly be an in
spring spectacle, and as a device for the
raising of Sunday-sch funds, it is doubtless
destined to become immensely popular. 1t
has occurred to US. however, that the instruc-
ton of the gentler sex in the art of war may
have disastrous effect on our domestic re-
lations. Suppose these expert broomswomen
should undertake to enforce martial law in
their own households, what would become
of the husbands who are in the habit of
foraging without leave, of not turning in at
taps, of sleeping at their pOsts-beside the
cradle ? Consider what terrible conse-
quences would ensue did our sweetheartsand
wives require their lovers and husbands to
give the countersigD every time they entered
the domestic camp, and lock them up in the
guard-house whenever they became a little
jolly! What husband, however devoted,
would submit to being ordered up at the
point of the broom handle to make the
kitchen fire in the morning, nurse the baby,
or DO the family washing? A civil war
would be precipitated at once, infinitely
more distressing than that between the
North and South, and the surgeons would
find the extraction of broom splints from the
heads Of families anything but cheerful
OF course we anticipate no such
We rely upon the good sense
Of the ladies to confne their martial exploits
to the Sunday-school stage, where ice cream
and cakes are sure to reward their valor, and
a plentiful supply Of ice water assuage their
thirst fo7 distinction.