Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1882-03-03
CROOKED WAYS.


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CROOKED WAYS.
Like a good many other young men
and women too, for that matter-I
was once badly afflicted with cuc0ethes
scfibend OF course greater evils might
have bcfallen me, might have been
seized with 4 passion for whisky or
gambling; but, still, my cac0etles sc,ib-
eadi WAS serious enough During my
college days the symptoms showed
themselves plainly; but the malady
did not really assume IFS true and aw-
FIJI proportions until had taken my
degree. Incn, forsooth, il fastened up
on me like a leech, and before many
months elapsed il overmastered me
completely. fiji accordance with my
mothers wish, went to Dundas osten-
sbly 10 read law with my uncle but it
was mere pretrnse If luw-rcading,
for the mornings That ! ought To have
spent over Blackstone were devoted to
the composition of i novel and the af-
tcrn0ons IA tile polishing or some poems.
Uncle Dick shook his head grayely and
demonstrated sometimes III sadness
and sometimes IN anger
THAT scribbling viii never amount
% anything. he would say contempt
ously. lhls Was hard 70 bear. but my
lofty aspirations sustained me, and firm
IN my belief Of ultimate success.
scribhled on and ever, and bombarded
All the magazines III the country with
my manuscripts The magazines did
not open their columns To me, and | |
fell back ut lust upon the weekly news |
papers, and especially upon the Boston |
Hehig Ii1Addium That journal |
printed my essays and certain as
sistant editor, whose initials were "F. |
u. $. sent me polite notes from time
70 time i WIS something to see my
productions III print; Il would have
been better had these productions
once in while brought in IL check. |
But they never did; they elected only |
nollte notes frIm u. b. s. Finally. / /
wrotea letter to the assistant editor up- |
on the subject, and by return post re- /
ceiyed reply II was sent to my pri-
waite box nj the postoilee, but, to my
great amusement, was directed to "Jane
Bell, instead of John NV hand
writing was not very distinct, and per
haps triile feminine, and the sigma
ture, npon which rather prided my
sell, certainly left II All open question
whether John or Jane were meant.
The note, too. began,
Miss Bell In reply to your ques
ton, would say that this journal paws
lis regular corps of writer's. We are
glad 81 receive your articles, and per
haps later may make adequate compen-
sation therefor; hut rs n young writer.
i would he wiser for ven to think at
present only of securing Il foothold.
lou have anexcellent chance of success
II the end. but much patience is neces-
Sary al the outset
L Please say whether shall direct frl
ture communications To John Bell Miss
BELL ar Mrs. Bell AZ present do not
venture To- give youany title Very truly
Neurs, +. b. SCREvEN."
This letter 40 once amused and piqued
me Y vi pleasant and rather en-
cauraging, hu' II was plain the writer
set me down rs m impeeunious young
woman, whereas tic truth was had n
very fair income of my own, and i
slN-fnot, mustached specimen of mas
cnhnity The idea Of playing the role
~ Miss Jane Bell tlcklcd my fancy, and i
therefore, giving my imagination free
rem upon the spur Of the moment sat
down and wrote as follows
II II. S.REvFN At present | also
am IN \ quandary. for do not know ,
whether ought q address YOU as ,
Madame, Monsieur, III MadcmoiseIle !
The last title Is mime Just now. although )
~ course feel IT liberty to change il
II ash Il, -.
proper opportunity oilers itself. Per ,
hlps matrimouy would I've more profit
able speculation than literature. Do
not, however. suppose am dependent
upon my pen Ion my bread and butter. ,
~ tins case, fear. the butter would be ,
very thin indeed. M: the fates have !
gwen me most Of the Injuries of life: !
hut these, 81 course, do not satisfy me. '
Ilio reason why wrote rs | did about )
payment ior my articles was simply be i
cause thought If they were good ,
enough e print they were good enough !
~ he paid for ltseems was mistaken:
tut, 70 show You that | take Your add ,
Vice, SEMI you another essay. will |
at least try IL secure foothold and pray /
that greater success may follow.
! am. dear Madame. Monsieur. or /
Mademois.le Screven,
Sincerely Yours, /
JANE BELL"
Laughing III my sleeve. sent this :
communication oil, and planned that, !
II the assistant editor sent me i friend :
y aply, would open correspond /
enee III my role of Miss Jane Bell and j;
tool I. Il. Screvcn As never man had :
been fooled before. Judge, then, of
my dlsmay when | received letter in q
what knew WAS Screvens writing. but /
not written on office naper. and signed t
frances Bertram Screven. g woman.
BY Jove 4 ! exclaimed there and then r
IN the postoffice, whereat small boy
who was standing nigh, nearly swallow
81 III astonishment the postage stamp I
which he was licking. | thrust the let /
ter III my pocket and did not read it .
until | was safely at home. Thus the :
missive ran: !
DEAR Miss BELL. Your piauant ,
letter prompts PIE TO write you reply,
not as an assistant editor but as a 4
woman like yourself, who is toiling up /
the steep path that leads to Parnassus. !
| might have known you were woman. !
and young one At that, because. !
although there is touch of masculine
strength in your essays and poems, still $
there is, too, q sweetness that is only
feminine. / think that women more !
often have this flavor of masculinity
than men have anything of that tender '
ness which is essentially and purely !
feminine. Were | in q position of
should very soon dismiss I
the cut-and-dried hack writers whose {
alfhauUh an,0nfb anI I
polished, lack the freshness, the spon- i