davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
NOT a Modern Romance.

Pognma.-My dear, must go cut on
business again tonight.
Resiua.-My dear, you didn't fad it
necessary to go away from me on busi-
ness almost every night before we were
married.
P.-No, my dear, but my business
then was to marry you.
R.-And you enjoyed my company
then?
P.-I did my dear. was moi so sure
OF you then as l am now, my dear.
R.-Well, you are candid enough, at
any rate.
P.-Iam, my dear, let us be honest
with each other. You see we talked
each other out. You know ne all
through au d KNOW you,
R.-And home is dull place. sup
pesc. And Pm not as interesting as
before You married me.
P.-You put tie case disagreebly
plain, my dear. There's no need of
serving up tie truth raw in that fashion.
But that's the size Of it when you take
the trimmings OF.
R.-Very we'll my dear, Pm going
out too may be out ill 2 a. M. poss
IDLY till three.
-Whcre---where are you going
my dear
R.-To see person on business.
PA person, man or woman /!
But its a woman of course. And why
so late?
R,-It's person my dear. Aud it's
business. Business is business, you
know.
P.-But respectable woman has no
business to be out without person at
such an hour. Above all wife.
R.-And why wife any less than a
husband my dear.
p Because because it amt the
thing, you know. 4 mans business
keeps him out late. At least some
mems business does. Niue does.
R.-And heuceforth mine does, my
dear. Sauce for the gander is sauch for
the goose. my dear, I'm going to see
something Of life. Home is dull. You'er
right my dear. You were interesting 9
before | married you. But now wo
know each other all through you know,
~ see too much OF each other, you
know. Come let's be honest with each
other, Sauce fer the gander ought to
de the goose's sauce, hadn't it, my
dear Sauce piquants. Goodbye.
I'm of for gIeener fields and pastures
newer,
Pho you don't my dear.
R.-Yes 10
P.-You 30 out of that door and you
don't come in again, my dear.
RI don't want to, my dear.
P.-What
Ill don't want to my DEAR I've
got 1000 of my Own, aud if your door
is locked when L return L shall hire
door OF my owu and lock you out, my
dear. Sauce for the gander is sauce for
the goose.
P.-O come now my dear; This is
all nonsense. You won't do any such
thing, come be sensible now.
RI am sensible, my dear. In fact
I've just g got full possession OF my sen
ses as Mr.. Fresh says. L can do it and
will. You know ne we'll enough fer
that, don't you my dear ?
P.-AIy dear, think | won't go out
tonight,
R.-Nenher will I, my dear.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

WHAT 10 READ.-Are you deficient
in taste Read the best Eugllsh poets,
such as Thomson, Gray, Goldsmith,
Pope, Cowper, COlerdge, Scott and
Wordsworth.
Are you deficient in Imagination !
Read Milton, Alkenside, Burke and
Shakespeare.
Are you deficient in judgment and
good sense and common affairs OF lite !?
Read Franklin.
Are you deficient 10 sensibillty Read
Goethe and Mackenzie.
Are you deficient 10 political knowl-
edsds Read MontesquIeu, the Feder-
alist, Webster and Calhoun.
Are you deficient in patriotism Read
Demosthenes, and the life of Washing
ton.
Are you deficient in conscience
Read some of President Edwards
works.
Are you defcientln anything? Read
the Bible.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

TuIRTEEN. Mrs, Carolina Rchlngs
Bernard died without farewell to her
husband, the poor lad! insisting, as soon
rs she knew her disease TO b. smallpox
that he should not appro ich her sick
room. A superstitioas acquai ilance oi
Mrs. Bernard relates that on the thr-
teenth anniversary OF her marriage she
gave a dinner plrty, that at the ta0le II
40 happened there were thirteen persons
present, aud tue fact made an unple''-
ant impression upon hsr' and recalled
the old superstition. Un the 18TH o' a
month she signed contract which "S'
one Of the most unfortunate business
transactions Of her life aud by which she
lost $50. 600. She was sick exactly thu
teen days, and died on the lSIh day c
! January.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
A soldiers 3 Dream.

Just before the battle of Cedar Creek
a camp sentinel who was oh duty tem-
p0rarily and trying 10 put In little
sleep, dreamed thai he went oat on q
scout. A mile to the right Of The camp
he came upon log barn, and as it began
to rain just then, be sought shelter, or was
about to, when he heard voices and dis
covered that the place was already oc-
cupied. After little investigation be
discovered that scouts had taken up
their quarters for the night in The place,
aud he therefore moved away. The
sentinel awoke with such vivid remem-
brance OF the details that he asked per-
misso ID go 60 over and confer with
one OF the scouts. When the log barn
was described TO this man he located It
at once, having passed 1t dozen times.
The dreamer described the highway
exactly as it was, giving every hill! and
turn. and the scout rut such faith in
the remainder of the dream that be took
four soldiers, one of whom was the
dreamer. and set out for the place.
Three Confederate scouts were asleep
in the straw and, wero AIKEN without a
shot being fired.
Three days before the affair at Rec
ley's Ford a corporal in the Sixth
Michigan Cavalry dreamed that a broth
er OF his, who was sergeant in another
company. would have bis horse killed IN
action, and would almost Immediately
mount dark bay borse with a white
nose. Within five minutes both horse
and rider would be killed by shell.
This dream was related TO more than a
score of comrades fully two days before
the fight. Early 10 the fight the ser
geant's horse was struck square in the
forehead by bullet aud dropped dead
in.his tracks. II was scarcely three
minutes before o wbite.nosed horse,
carrying blood stained saddle galloped
mp to the sergeant and halted. He re-
membered The dream aud refused to
mount the animal, ,and soon after picked
up black horse. Tie white nosed
animal was mounted by second cor
poral in another regiment aud the horse
and rider were torn 70 fragments by
shell, in full sight of four companies OF
the Sixlh.-N. Y. Commercial Adrer-
tiser.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
brakennen.

How many types of the many sided
brakeman we have travelled with, sale
the jester, musing over five years o.
platform travel. There Is the plura
one, YOU know, who al Says doubles up
on The names of his stations ana calls
ont 'CIevelands! Clevelands $! Change
cars for Hudsons Rayeunaa and Aarons,
This car for Buaaloes =
And the jovial one,' said the fs'
passenger, the Jolly brakeman who l.
always happy; who. when we run into a
penitentiary town always shouts.
'Moy amensing! change suits seven
years for refreshmeutsn If you tel
him the fire has gone out be. wants 10
know who left the door opeu. The
crosser the passengers are the merrler
ne is, and it would be a thing without
parallel to see him mad
And the dismal brakeman said the
cross passenger. who puts wet wood
in The s'oye and leaYes the door open,
and spills grease ON you when lie lights
the candles, and ii you ask him when
we get there. he slghs aud says We
may never get there. He points out
Of the window at whistling post. aud
says. There's where number six ran
off and killed Billy BLY,, last week.
And when We cross a ravine he says.
This is the same kind Of a bridge the
Ashtabula disaster happened on Aud
he points 10 heart-broken looking
man two seats ahead OF you aud tells
YOU. His wife IS dead. We've got
her in the baggage car And then iu a
determined effort to increase your
gloom, if possible, he adds. Only one
he had.'
And the cautious brakeman said
the sad passenger, the slow.spoken
man who always looks at his watch
very carefully before be will tell you ai
what hour the train is due at the termi-
nus, aud looks out of The window very
earnestly 10 get his landmarks before
he tells you where yeu stop for dln'
ner.'
And the lraseible duffer,' said the
man on the wood.box, who roars
'Naw!' when you ask him If this is a
mail train, and bangs the door agains!
your elbow every time lie comes Ia, and
tells a pewildered woman who wants
to know how she can get to Niblet's
Siding that night, that she can get of
at the tank when We stop at Brewster't
run down on twelve and catch % com.
Ing back on l5's time, aud that's the
only train that stops there. And ht
gets so filed with wrath that he has tC
go out on the platform now and ther
and swear it off at the little snow birds
on the telegraph wires. l know him,
the man on the wood-box said, as be
rubbed his elbow with pathetic empha
Sis.
Aud the liar, said the woman who
talks bass, who tells you that tbs
train makes close connections with
other trains az places that are not Jun:
tions; who tells you he'll build a Ore
in that car after they leave the mex
station, and you find that station is tht
end of his run who says he'll hell
you out with your bundles and ther
runs back into the parlor car to tall
with the engineers daughter and wht
always tells you he has no key wher
you ask him to turn a seat for you.'
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
The silver Lining.

There's never q day so sunny
But little cloud appears;
There's never life so happy
But has its time Of tears;
Yet the sun shines out the brighter
Whenever the tempest clears
There's never a garden growing
With roses in every plot;
There's never heart SO hardend
But it had one tender spot;
We have only to prune the border
To 6nd,the fOrget-me-nOt.
There's never sun that rises,
But we know twill set at night;
The tints that CLEAN in the morning
At evening are just as bright,
And the hour that is the sweetest
Is between the dark and light.
There's never dream so happy
But the waking makes us sad;
There's never dream of sorrow
But the waking makes us glad;
We shall look some day with wonder
AT the troubles we have had.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

A motherly.looking woman Yester-
day carefully handed the stamp clerk at
the postoflice letter marked 10 haste,
and inquired if there was any extra
charge for writing that on. oh, none
at ALL How soon will the letter go
out?' In about forty minuted.' No
sooner than thatg' well we might
hire a special train and get 1t off in
about twenty minutes Would it be
too much trouble p oh, none at ALL
She thought for a few moments, turned
the letter over three or four times, and
fiually said: Il guess | won't ask you
to hire special train, but if you will be
kind enough 10 telegraph my sister that
I have written her letter to tell her
that | can't come till Monday, and TO
be at the depot to meet me. aud that
mother didn't go 10 Toledo after all, |
shall be ever so muoh obliged. Good
morning.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
How TO REMEMBER A THING

How TO REMEMBER A THING,-
Grasp 1t fully, clearly and definitely 10
the mind; be sure you have 1t exactly
1t, and not something like it, or some
thing about it. Connect it With other
things that are known suffer it to link
itself with other ideas and impressions
already in the mind, that you may have
something to recall it BY. Frequently
revert to 1t until you ale sure that 1t has
become a permanent possession. The
memory may be termed the muscle OF
the mind; it is developed by exercise.
the more 6tting the exercise the better
the result. Attention is the stun That
memory is made Of.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Gentleman meets friend aud takes
HIM home to dinner. Arrived at the
house he leaves him 10 the sitting-room
to announce the fact TO his wife. The
friend. hearing distinctly a clamor Of
tongues in The adjoining room, decora-
les the key hole with his ear.
Shrill vcice-Always the way-bring'
Ing people home without a minutes
warning Him, too Why couldn't you
le,ve HIM to fatten on his usual free
lunch routs
IIoarse voice--Sih!
ShrIll yoice-l won't sab |!
Hoarse yolce--I tel you, you WILL
0, if he wasn't in the room outside.
wouldn't | give ,ou-
The friend shouting through the key
hole-I amt any longer; give it TO her
exit slamming the door,
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

When Queen Annie told DR.. South
that bis sermon was too short, he re-
piled that he would have made IL
shorter had he had more time. Don't
fail TO relate this anecdote to Your pastor
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Pears 10 me your mill goes awiully
slow, said an impatient farmer boy 70
a miller. 4 could eat that meal
fasier'n you grind it, How long 40
YOU think you could do l., my lad ?
ouoth the miller. Till | starved 10
DEATH answered the boy.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

A New Orleans jury declared man
TO have come TO his death by AN ur-
known cart.' About on par win
this is the Philadelphia verdict respect
lpo a man who had been crushed TO
death in mill, when the jury remark
ed. No blame can be attached 70 The
machinerY.,
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Mamma, when l noticed all the peo-
pie after they came into church this
morning lean their heads down against
the back of the pew in front of them, |
did Just as they did and leaned mine
down too That was right, my dear;
and you uttered a prayer like good
little boy:' No, mamma, ] counted
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Colonel said man who wanted 10
make out a genealogical tree. Colonel
how can l become acquainted with nay
family history!' Simply BY running
for Office. answered the Colonel.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

so she refused you. did shsT asked
piusry: why didn't you press her. my
boy?' Press herl' exclaimed Brown;
..be wouldn't let me get nesr enough
for that,
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

A syracuse hotel has the following
nlacard Excuse the impudence OF the
clerk. as he is my son. The son says
his grandfather huug it cut when bis
father was clerk.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Texas man will shoot just as quick
II YOU call him an official bulletin as
when you call him llar---'a little
quicker, perhaps.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Somebody notes that love Is more
interesting than marriage, TOR The same
reason that romance is more enuc'pg
than history.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Many Of our cares are but moru,u
way of looking at our privileges. we
LET our blessings get moldy, and 'hen
cali them curses. LII -----
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

The man VINO has no stomach Tor
good humor 10 the mau who has q oa'
humor in his stomach. 'a ll
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

Mrs. Partlngton says the cnly way
To nreyent steamboat explosions is 70
make the engineer boil the water On
shore,
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

The man who won't work fora doilsr
a day will spend two hours trying 70
solve q riddle for nothing.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

when ever, body is wise or every
body dead the doctor will have TO give
up doctrine. .....4
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

No one can have failed % observe
the power Of a true life upon all with
whom Il comes 10 contact. is.q
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

IL good men speak Ill Of Thee. exam
lac myself; but il evil men speak VI Of
,hee. feel thyself houored.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

A New Jersey uxu couldn't zee any
danger is smoking while weighing
soxd der.' he can'tsee anything now
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

DO NOT BE HAsTY. 1T there is one
weakness among us more conspicuous
than another it is disposition to hurraa
for men who have more dash than solid
sense. On this point host OF people
have sort of craze. They shout and
throw up their hats 10 advance. on the
shortest notice, for such men, and soon
find their jubilations TO have been the
expression ofa thoughtless en- .husiasm.
Their heroes were not of the sort they
imagined. Better prove meu before
glorifying them. 1t is also no. good
sign when men who are just assuming
untried responsibilities are willing to
yaunt or 10 be vaunted. Let the honor
aud the praise come for work well done
--as the reward of sersice--and they
will stick. The men who believe that
the Church and the State are to be run
by wind aud great enterprises consum'
mated by displays of dash are not
worth hurrahiug for.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
NoTARIEs PUBLIC.
JUSTICES OF THE PEACE

D,v1s D1sr.-Dr. G.. A. Brown, obed Funk ana
d. ii. Spengler. ~, y W crorr q w
OlTTUS JoHSsTos.-J. H. Rodefer, Levi II. Cullers
WAnisox.-Samuel e. Campbell James D.
SsHBY.2Saml. Hamman, n. B. Painter jacob
r. Miller. m 1,rbla Jobn NJ
Pence.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08

The failure Of one man Is the cppor.
tuuity Of another.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-03-08
gb.nssSonR 5sraIS
Advertising Rates,

Advertisements will be Inserted At oas u lie
Per square ten liaes OF iess for the nrst inssr
Ion, and so cents for each subsequent insertion.
Unless thu namber OF Insertions be nssked uyo
the manuscript, it viii be published until forbid
and charged accordingly.
Hotioes in the local column will DO inserted IN
ten cents osr line. each insertion.
Advertissmsntsf three mouth. or longer vii
be inserted al lower rates.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-05-04
THE OREALLA HOMICIDE.

Coroner Herman began an investigation yester-
day relative to the death OF James Keogh who was
stabbed by Michael Murphy. boatswain of the ship
Oreala Daniel Fitzgerald testified to seeing KeOgh
strike Murphy in the face with the heel of his Shoe.
He saw the men sculliDg, but when Murphy cried
out that he was stabbed the witness walked away:
KeOgh disagreeable fellow, and had had
trouble with every of the sailors the way
over. Other witnesses testified TO Keogh's bad rep
utation Oh shipbOard, and TO threats made by him
made statement. lie gave the particulars Of the
occurrence as they have already been told. Coroner
Herman committed Murphy to the Tombs and sent
morning when the inquest will be continued.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-05-04
A POLICE CAPTAIN ON TRIAL.

Police Captain Ryan,oi the Twenty-first Precinct,
was on trial before COmul ,iOuer Mason yesterday,
on :. charge os assaultug with a cane without
cause Dcnuis kaUe, boy sixteen years old. Kane
Resulted that he was playing i'll the street with
several other boys, when Captain Ryan came along
ia cilizans' dress. The Captain began TO beat him
about tho head and back with a cane
without saying word. tie struck
back. and thea said 70 him Take that and GO"
Two witnesses c0IrobOrated the boys story of the
beating captain Ryan admitted that he bad
caI-d the boy, but ne protested that the blows
watch lie had inflicted were very hight and that
the was " straw III weight Two wit
=, one OF whom was policeman, we're called by
Captain Ryan 70 prove that the LOys in Second-ave
had no,,n compiained OF by citizens Tor making too
much Dolse wnilc at play. Captain Ryan also pro-
duoed letter. which he sand mad been sent
L, am through the mail. The writer of the letter
offered III kanos name 10 settle The case for $40.
kano said that To knew nothing about the letter
tie the for money The ieiIer not accepted
al evidence. Decision reserved.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-05-04
THE CITY,S CLEAN STREETS.

Mayor Grace has addressed to the Citizens Com
mittee of Twenty-One on Street Cleaning COM
municatiOn asking its opinion a. 10 the condition
of the streets He reminds the committee that
while he was endeavorng, i'll the spring of 1881 to
enforce the law relative To the cleaning of the
streets and removing the delinquent police COM
missoners the committee, the representatives OF
the people, prepared and secured the passage OF a
street cleaning bill the provisions of which 1t be-
came the duty of the Mayor to carry out. From
time to time since the organization Of the new
Street-C leaning Department the Mayor re-
minds the committee that lac has taken the liberty
of asking it to aid him in examining into
the condition of the streets and the efficiency of the
Street-C Cleaning Department, and always with the
happcst results. The Mayor regards ii as most es-
sential to the sanitary condition of the city that tho
streets should be thoroughly clean, particularly
during the protracted heated term. AS the repre-
sentative of the citizens in this matter he requests
the committee to give the streets of the city
thorough examination and certify to him any re-
spect in which il may find the Street-Cleanlng De
partment delinquent and the streets not cleaned IN
conformity with the law.
The Mayor believes from personal obseI vation
and the testimony OF others that the thoroughiares
ofthe city in better cOnd ton than ever before
at this season of the year.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-05-04
NEW STREET LETTER.

New etter-boxes are being placed in the district
below Canal-st They are painted bright red so as
to lie seen from long distance. Collections arc
made through a door that occupies the whole side
of the box, and Is more convenient for taking out
large letters than the openings III boxes of the old
style. card IS placed under a square Of glass III
the side of the box, which is printed list OF the
times at which collections made. There Is so
in one a card on which is painted the hour of
the next collection. This card is to be taken out by
the collector at each trip. and another giving the
time of the next collection is substltu cd. The card
taken out is given to the superintendent on the
turn OF the collector proof that the collection
has been made. The number of the box TO which it
belongs is shown on each OF these cards. Broadway
from Canal-st. TO the Battery. has been supplied
with the boxes and Others will be placed in the
side streets
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-05-04
TIDING OVER AN EMERGENCY.

Tho proposition of Emigration Commissioner
Talnt-r approved by the Board on Tuesday, that,
II Wow vi he embarrassment Of the Commission
arising out of The failure of the Legislature to ap
rrDpr,,1 ,noney Tor tue maintenance of the immi-
gra.t Institutions, The PEI tie employ OF the
slIi yns By signing agreement to all CLAIMS
upon the board or the individual Commissioners
for the payment of their salaries, and take the
cDancos OF tue Legislature making provisions for
thsId was dnanIIEously agreed 10 yesterday. Not
Nitils landing tins The employees Know that Com
lnisAOuer Forrest viii s,ihere to his offer To pay
item their salaries IL OF default by the Legis
isIure. Commissioner uaIself yesterday instructed
SECRETARY jackson tnat II any destitute German
migrants were ia absolute need, 10 give them relief
ana u draw upon him tor the expense.