davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04
Hc had the Jedge.

There Is an old negro in Austin who
claims to have studied "fossify outen a
book" Yesterday he went into the ,us-
tice court and said: "Jedge, kin git II
'dictment writ agin dat wufIles niger,
Pete?"
"what's he been doing?"
"He's procrastimator. He's been bin a
procrastimatin'."
"Procrastinating? There's no law
against that"
''No Law agin procrastimstion? Den
what's de law fur? Amt procrastination
de thief oh timer"
Certainly, / believe 1t has been so
stated"
'Well, den, amt Pete a thief"
"Yes, you might so construe it, but you
cannot convict a man for stealin' time"
"No, but when wehsb got de proof on
him fur stealin' time, we hab got de cir
cumstantial ebidence agin him fur stealin'
money, fur don't 'hossify say dat time am
money? Got yer dar, Jedge."
And the old man went out chuckling to
himself: SCOT him dar. Got de ledge
dis time suah yer q foot high"
job Work Of I'll descriptions neatly ex-
executed ut the Register ON e.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

A fght between toad and q large
tlack spider was recently witnessed at
Merrick, l.. I. After each round the toad
hoped to plantain Leaf, Bit OF a piece, and
then returned to the fray. After this had
occurred several times, the leaf was taken
away, and the toad, failing to find the
leaf, soon rolled over and died.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

THE YOUNG WIDOW.

She IL modest, but not bsshfu,,
Free and easy, but not bold;
Like an apple, ripe and mellow,
Not 100 young and not too old,
Half inviting, half repulsivc,
Now advancing, and now shy
There is mischief In her dimple,
There is danger In her eye
She has studied human nature;
She is schooled in all her arts,
She has taken her diploma
As the mistress of all hearts.
She can tell the very moment
When to sigh and when TO sniie;
On. g maid is sometimes charming
But a widow all The while.
Are yeu sads How very serious
VIII her handsome face become!
Are you angrys She is wretched,
Lonely, friendless, fearful, dumb!
Are you mirthful? How her laughter,
Silver sounding, will ring out
She can lure, and catch, and play you,
As the angler does the trout
Ye old bachelors Of forty,
Who have grown SO bold and wise.
Young Americas OF twenty.
With the love look in your eyes.
Y,umay practice all the lessons
Taught by Cupid since the fall;
But know little widow
WAC could win and fool you all.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

CoMErs.-rhe comet Is cansing more
persons TO rise early than, we think, could
have been raised In any other way. This
heavenly visitor may be seen any morn
ing between three o'clock and sunrise. IL
is little south OF east. A new comet
was discovered OH the eighth Of October,
1882, four degrees southwest Of the great
comet, with same motion In right ascen-
sion and declination. DIR. Lewis Swift,
director Of Warner observatory, says, the
new comet discovered by DR.. Schmidt, at
Athens, Is uDquestionabiy a fragment OF
the great comet, broken of at its perl
helion passage. This proves that the
great Comet must have grazed the sun,
and hence passed through terrible crisis.
This IS the second instance on record Of q
comet being disrupted, the first one being
Bielas' comet OF 1s46.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04
MOLLER & CO.,
Organ Manufacturers,
AT
HAGERSTOWN, MARYLAND,

ARE prepared by the very considerable enlarge
ment OF their buildings and added facilities 10
fll promptly, orders for large PIPE ORGANS
FOR CHURCHES. They also manufacture the
MOLLER CHORAL PIPE ORGAN as well as
every variety of CABINET ORGANS.
Their aim will be TO attain perfection in all
the varied requirements of superior instrument.
Their testimonial are numerous and uniform
as to superior quality of Tone" combined with
extraordinary power and variety OF composition
The report of q committee empowered 10 Sc
lect for the Chapel of the First Reformed Church
a. Hager.towr, Md, is 10 the following: The
MOLLER ORGAN completely carri' c the day,
from the softest whisper to the most powerful
tone ''it is simply wonderful" and we heartily
recommend the choice OF the MoLi-Ek ORGAN.
Our prices are uniform securing the adVan-
tag s OF a good instrument at reasonable price.
July s, 1882. ly
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04
FARMERS,
Look to Your Interest! t!

EVERYTHING in the Quecnsware line
~ for parties going to housekeeping.
Also gold-band moss-rose tea setts, COB
lets, Jelly glasses, &c. For sale cheap by
G. Il. LICKLlDER.
Sept. 80, 1882. If
BOOTS AND SHOES-I have received
ID one Of the best and cheapest stock of
Boots and Shoes in town. Gum Boots
and Shoes all sizes. Call and examine.
G. II. LICKLIDER.
CORN KNIVES AND BASKETS, Coal
" Holds and Shovels, Drill Spouts. A
full line OF Hardware, &C., for sale by
G. L. LICKLIDER.
Sept. 80, 1882. If
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

job WORK Of I'll descriptions neatly ex-
executed ut the Register ON e.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

"Oh! George" Boston girl intensely
exclaimed while gazing at the comet, "bow
transcendently beautiful and rapturously
precious It is; ] s':ould 60 love 70 study
iotany."
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

Once upon time man got mad at the
editor and stopped his paper. The next
week he sold his corn at four cents below
the market price. Then, his property
was sold for taxes, because he didn't read
the sherifi7s sales. He was arrested and
fined IS for going hunting on Sunday,
and he paid $500 fora lot Of forged notes
that had been advertised two weeks and
the public cautioned not 70 negotiate for
them. lie then paid big l.Ishman with
a foot like forgehammer, to kick him all
the way to the newspaper office, where he
paid four years subscription In advance
and made the editor sign no agreement TO
knock him dawn and rob him II he ever
ordered his paper stopped again. Such Is
life without newspaper.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1882-11-04

When a young man ki,ses his girl good
night about ] 30 a. m. he may have nearly
mile to walk before reaching his home,
and be enyies his girl, who, he supposes,
jumps into bed and is fast asleep ten min
utes after he leaves the house. He doesut
know that she must first fish seventy-Line
hair-pins out Of her head, one at q time,
and twist her hair up into bits Of paper 20
that 1t will crimp nicely next day. and
that be is In bed snoring before she turns
of the gas. If he was aware Of this fact,
perhaps he would leave earlier.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1882-08-17
dhs Daily Bpllst1g.
THURSDAY, AUGUST II, 1882.

who would reject such an alliance
for his daughter-one Of the oldest
names in the realm; fair share Of
wealth, and a coronet. Go ahead,
my lord, and l will sustain you If I
can"
And the Earl went ahead. That
very evening no arranged with the
lady, and on the following day they
were privately married.
In the evening Sir George missed
his daughter. He had just inquired
for her, when a door was opened,
and she and the Earl Of Butte enter
cd, hand in hand, and advanced
straight to his chair aud went down
on their knees.
Not word Of explanation was
needed. The old advocate caught
bis breath, changed from death
like paleness to a furious flush half.
a-dozen times, and finally gave in.
"Sir George, henceforth I shall
take great pleasure in sustaining my
wife's father" said the Earl.
A hot response was upon the par
ent's lips, but he swallowed it, and
gradually sense Of the absurdity Of
the situation possessed him, and
anon he burst into hearty laugh,
and the erring children were for
given.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1882-08-17
To Our Earbor Authorities.

Az OuT hdIDOr hutuOTl1eb.
Regarding an important expert
ment in electric lighting, which has
been made in Table Bay, the Cape
Times of Monday, oath April, says:
-"On Saturday evening the harbor
was for the first time illuminated by
the electric light, and those who had
opportunity of seeing the docks IN
der the brilliant and novel display
had no difficulty in approaching the
great improvement that viii be
effected when the new system Of
lighting is fully introduced. The
Harbor Board have decided to have
q months trial Of the light, and if the
result proves satisfactory there can
be little doubt as to the system be-
ing permanently maintained, as even
the preliminary experiment on Sat-
urday evening clearly showed the
advantage Of the electric over the
gas light. 1t is several months since
the Harbor Board workmen COM
menced to erect the tall lamp-posts
required for giving the light the ele-
walton necessary for throwing the
rays over wide area. Sixteen posts
have been erected at various points
round the docks, eight of them be-
ing twenty-three feet in height and
eight eighteen feet. The system Of
lighting employed is the Brush pat
emit, which is being extensively
adopted for outside illumination.
Motive power is supplied by twelve
horse power portable engine, placed
in one part Of the engine-house Of
the new craving dock. Here is also
placed the dynamo-electric machine
"a very large and powerful one
which generates the electric current,
and communicates it to the lamps
through the insulated wire connect
ing them. Each of the lamps is pro-
vided with four earbons. Only two
Of these burn at one time, and when
they are done the other two are
lighted by very ingenious contriv-
ance, and by this means continuous
light can be maintained for sixteen
hours. Everything being ready on
Saturday trial was made before
dusk, but of course the light was
not properly seen, and it was not
continued long. At nine o'clock the
current was again turned on, and
the gloom of the docks was speedily
dispelled by the bright glare of the
electric lamps. The experiment last
ed an hour and a half, and during
that time the light remained wonder
fully steady and bright. OF course
there was Pickering now and then,
but even when the light from the
carbons faded slightly there could
be no question as to its superiority
over its ancient rival, the gas. The
gas lamps were kept alight during
the experiment, and they had a very
"tallow dip" appearance compared
with the bright and attractive light
which threatens to supersede them.
1t is expected that the electric light
viii be in full operation on Tuesday
night"
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1882-08-17

Caprice Lanoers,
Rural Festival Recreation,
ViciRsitudes Reverie,
Boccheroni's celebrated Minueteo,
Hazel Kirke POLKA.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1882-08-17
Instrumental /:

Days Of Youth,
Up the Thames, NARROW woods.
La Diva Polka,
jolly Utter 9allop,
The new Racquet Galop.
PATHS Echo Song,
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
Futures

futures
Dealing in futures is now recognized
business in which nearly every business
man, planter or farmer engages to greater
or less extent. Those wishing to either buy
or sell cotton, grain or pork for future de-
hvery; at the lowest possible margins,
should send their orders to the Texas Cot,
ton and Grain Exchange. This Is char.
tered institution, and perfectly reliable and
responsible.
Margins required-Only 81 per bale for
cotton, lie per bushel for grain, DC per bar
rel for pork.
ALI communications should be addressed
TO A. J, WnEELocK, Manager,
Board of Trade Rooms, Dallas, Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
a New Err.

The true secret OF happiness is perfec
health, which enables the individual SO EN-
Joy life, and attain competency and con
tentment. The martyr to dyspepsia, in
continual misery, is without hope in the
pursuit of business or pleasure, and realizes
that existence yields only failure But a
new era has come, and good health is as
sured, with positive relief from the ills Of
indigestion aud torpid liver, by the use of
Dr. Aoder's Dyspepsia Tablets. They are
very nice, try them. Only 25 and SO cents,
IN handsome boxes. For sale by w. II.
Patterson ~ Cy,, the Peachstone Liniment
men.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
For Sale.

For Sale
Two engines combined, Greenwood make,
Link motion, forty.four horse power each,
with hy.wheel eight feet in diameter, III
teen-inch face, one boiler twenty-four feet
long, forty-four inches in diameter two
twelve-inch and two eight-inch ilues steam
and mud drums, smoke-stack and breech-
ing, Dayton com. supply pump, all COM
plete and in good order, cheap for cash.
Address Shreveport Cotton Compress
company, Shreveport, LA.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

fsH THVUIfy
EDITOR HERALD-Where can / purchase
the best and cheapest furniture in the city ?
Please answer. ENQUIRER
George Rick is the oldest and the largest
furniture dealer in the city. His goods en-
brace everything in the line, and his prices
are as low as they can be bought for in st.
LOUIS Cincinnati, or any other western
city. Remember the place, No. $50 and 1882
Elm street and the man George Rick,
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
Extract of Report From the Celebrated

Physician, Erasmus Wilson of London,
England. Several cases of incipient Con-
sumption have come under my observation
that have been cured by the timely use OF
GoLDEN's LIRDIG's LIQuID EXTRACT OF
BEEF AND Tonic lNyIGoRAToR. (Remem
her the name, CoLDRS's-take no other, OF
druggists generally.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
Forty Years Experience of AN O,a Nrr.s

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup is the
prescription ofone ofthe best female rhy.
slcians and nurses in the United States, and
mas y, been used for forty years with never.
laillng safety and success by millions of
mothers and children, from the feeble In.
lant OF one week old to the adult. II cor
reefs acidity of the stomach, relieves wind
ccolic,, regulates the bowels, and gives rest.
health and comfort to mother and child
We believe it the best and surest remedy in
The world in all cases of dysentery and diar,
rh~a IN children, whether arising from
teethlhg or irom any other cause. Full d.
recuons Tor using will accompany each bot
lie. None genuine unless the facsimile of
Curtis " Perkins is ON the outside wrapper,
Sold by all medicine dealers. IS cents a
bottle. -
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

The travelling public generally are max
ing their headquarters while in Sherman at
the Binkley house, as the fare is much i'm.
proved and accommodations generally sec
ond to none i'm the state.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

Are you made miserable by indigestion,
constipation, dizziness. loss of appetite,
yellow skin Shiloh's Vitalizer is positive
cure. Sold by Hickox 4 House, druggists,
Cos Main street, Dallas, Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

shiloh's Cough and Consumption Cure is
sold by us ona guarantee. ltcures con-
sumption. Sold by Hiokox & House, drug
glsts. Cos Main street. Dallas, Texas,
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
The Trees lark

The Trees bark
easily at this time Of the year and so do
your hands. For. curing bruises, cuts,
ARSIcA SALvE has no equal. Ali farmers,
mechanics, and ranchmen should keep il.
For Sale by all druggists in Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy--a positive cure
for catarrh, diptheria and canker mouth.
Sold by Hickox & House, druggists, COS
Main street. Dallas, Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
Burnett's Cocaine

Promotes the growth of the hair, and rem
ders. II dark and glossy. 1t holds, in a
liquid form, large proportion OF deodor-
lzed CCcoaine oil, prepared expressly for
this purpose. No other compound pos
sesses the peculiar properties which so ex-
actly SUIT the various conditions of the hui
man hair.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
That Miserable Headache

Sour Stomach and sad countenance are
the result of indigestion. BRowE's PErsIN
Tonic will set you alright. For Sale by all
druggists in Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

IL costs you nothing 10 look al orr's bug.
gies, II You are needing now Is tho time 70
save money.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

For dyspepsia and liver complaint, You
have a printed guarantee on every bottle OF
shiloh's yitaliEer. II never fails TO cure.
Sold by Hickox & House, druggists, COS
Main street Dallas. Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

Why will you cough when shiloh's CWe
will give immediate relief Price II cts /,
Scots. and 81. Sold by Hickox & Honse,
druggists, Cos Main street Dallas, Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

A nasal inject or free with each bottle o
shilohs Catarrh Remedy. Price 80 cents.
Sold by Hickox h House, druggists, COS
Main street. Dallas. Texas.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

On IL thankful for past patronage and
will prove II. by selling you buggy, car
rage or spring wagon Ut cost for thirty
daye.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

Cssarrh is the result Of blood poisoning,
3: 3. 3. being q most powerful vegetable
blood purifier, has mover failed " cure tllis
dissess In its WORT ssaecA 80 -
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

That buggy that Thought OF Orr last
ysar Is the best buggy ever saw for the
Jricc.. He is selling The same buggy at cost
Ior thirty days.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

FER the Mood AndI.iver.
use sarsaparila Dandclion, with Iodide
Potassium. For sale by all druggists.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31

For the purpose Of closing out, will cell
my entire stock..of buggics, spring wagons
and carriages at retail. for thirty days, Mt
cost. w. w. Orr.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-05-31
THE DALLAs HERALD, WEDNESDAY, MORNING. May sI. lsso

loon where beer, ice and liquors were sold;
that prostitutes were frequently seen in the
mousse, sometimes drinking sometimes not,
ana good, respectable people often resorted
.here TO purchase beer, ice, etc. Held, TO
oring the house within the inhibition of
the statute, the house must be kept for the
purpose OF prostitution, or as common re-
sort Tor prostitutes and vasabonds. The
evidence does not sustain the conviction.
reversed and remanded. Wilson,.
Garcia VS.. State; from Webb county. That
ne cannot read or write is made by stat
ute u cause for a challenge of Juror, EXCEPT
when 1t appears to the court that a reouis
lite number OF persons who can read and
write cannot be found in the county. This
provision relates to the English language.
That the county was sparsely populated is
no snch appearance of the fact TO the court,
and that this provision has been dispensed
with by aprevous order Of the court, is no
authority vested in the trial court, Re-
versed and remanded Wilson, i.
- Williams VS.. State; from Smith county.
10 constitute robbery the taking of the
property must either be by assault or by
violence and putting in fear of life or
bodily injury. In the first instance
the need he no putting in fear of Lille or
bodily injury In the latter case, /. e., by
violence, these elements must exist. The
charge In this case is by assault, but this
the evidence fails to establish, nor would it
sustain the charge under violence. Re
VeTsed ana remanded. Hurt, ].
Irophet vs. state; from Shackletord
county o whereas IN this case It is doubtful
rom me face; of the papers the oifense is
charged direct y and positively by the dis
trict or county attorney, or whether he
esents the oIiense TO the court as acts OF
oii ON or commission constituting the
ol'hse, as set out IN the affidavit on which
lne allluaVit Is based, the information
Wlll ne held defective. In other words,
tne ,ouense must be directly and ailirma-
tNely, charged by the information. Re.
'eTseu anu reinanded. Hurt ].
M hunlpkln VS.. state rom BoSque county.
. Inc question asked the witness was, WAS
tle language used by the defendant at said
Ilinc USED m such manner as was calcu-
iateu 10 disturb your family ~ 10 which
ne ne answered, Yes, Held, error. That
.ne witness should have stated facts, the
name o. ana what was said by, and the
voice OF, defendant, leaving the question
whether II was calculated to disturb to the
jury: Inc evidence fails to support the
The Tombstone epitaph., 1882-04-03
Cochise County Records.
Table Etiquette.

From Bill Yves Boomerang.
 It has been stated, very truly, too, that the law of the napkin is but vaguely understood. It may be said, however, on the start, that custom and good breeding have uttered the decree that it is in poor taste to put the napkin in the pocket and carry it away.
 The rule of etiquette is becoming more and more thoroughly establish ed thatthe napkin should be left at the house of the host and hostess af- ter dinner.
 There has been good deal of dis cussion also, upon the matter of fold ing the napkin after dinner, and whether it should be so disposed of, or negligently thrown into the gravy bat. If, however, it can be folded easily, and without attracting too much attention and prolonging the session for several hours, it should he so arranged and placed beside the plate, where it may be easily found by the hostess, and returned to her neighbor from whom she borrowed it for the occasion. If, however, if the lady of the house is not doing her own work, the napkin may he carefully jammed into glob- ular wad and fired under the table, to convey the idea of utter reckless ness and pampered abandon.
 At the court of Engenie, the GUS toms of the table were very rigid, and the most prominent guest of H R. H. was liable to get the G. B. if he spread his napkin on his lap. and cut his egg in two with a carving knife. The custom was that the napkin should be hung on one knee, aud the egg busted at the big end and scooped out with d spoon.
 A prominent American at her ta- ble one day, in an unguarded mo- ment shattered the shell of soft boilded egg with his knife, and while prying it apart both thumbs were enormously jammed into the true inwardness of the fruit with so much momentum that the juice took him in the eye, thus binding hlm and maddening him to such degree that he got up and threw the rem nants into the bosom of the hired man plenipotentlary, who stood near the table, scratching his ear with a tray. As may readily be supposed, there was a painful interim, during which it was hard to tell for five or six minutes whether the prominent or the hired man would
The Tombstone epitaph., 1882-04-03
AND STILL ANOTHER {!
An Old Man Murdered near st. David,

After the ErITAPH went to press last evening, word was brought from Conten- ton of the murder of an old man who lived across the San Pedro, opposite St. Davids, the Mormon settlementAbout six or seven miles below Contention. The name of the man was McMenomy. He owned a sheep ranch. upon which he was living alone at the time of his death. He was shot through the head and must have died instantly. It wls supposed that he had money, and robbery was the probable cause of the damnabe deed. Justice Smith, of Benson, was notified of the murder and proceeded to the spot 10 hold an inquest, the result of which has not been learned