Press and daily Dakotaian. (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1880-1889, 1882-12-13
WHAT LEG olD.
The Amusing Experience Of n Major.

The Amusing Experience Of Major.
Major Todd, of Bangor, Me-, lost his
right leg at the battle Of fredericksburg.
and some time ego he purchased an arti-
fetal leg from man in Washington. It
contained system Of springs, which en-
abled the major to use it in such natural
manner that when he was walking along
the street nobody would for moment
suppose that he had not both of his own
legs.
Gone Sunday, while the major was on
luis way to church, he alipped ON the ice
and gave his store leg severe wrench
He must have dislocated some Of the
springs; for after reaching the church
and taking his seat, and while The clergy.
man was reading the seriptures. the leg
suddenly few up and rested on the
back Of the seat in front Of him. The
congregation looked at him in amaze.
ment, and he grew very red in the face.
As soon as he took it down it jumped
up again and wiggled about on the back
of the pew. finally kicking Mrs. Thomp.
sons bonnet to rags. Then the major
but it instantly began q eonvuls,ve
movement in his own pew, during which
it upset the stools. plunged around
among the hymn boofs and hats. and
hammered the hoard, beneath the seat
untilit made such Q racket That the
minister had to stop. The sexton came
running in to find ont what was the
matter, and the major, after explaining
the difficulty in whisper, asked the
sexton to let him lean on him while he
charged on the front door. As soon as
the MAJOR got into the aisle that dislo.
Gated leg kicked the sexton in . most in.
solent manner. varying the exercises by
making eccentric swoops of to one slde,
during which it kicked eight of the high
hats at the pew doon into black silk
chaos.
By the time the maior reached the
vestibule the leg had become perfectly
reckless. It few up before and it few
up behind. It butted against the good
leg, and darted ont sidswise. and des-
cribed circles, and tried to insert its toes
in the msjors coat tail pockets, and te
whack him on the nose. When the sex.
ton came with hack and put the majol
in it the leg brsndished itself in his face
and concluded the exercise by planting
q terrible blow in his stomach. Then
the major told the driver he would give
him $40 to take the leg of, and the
driver accepted the offer. For severa
minutes it eluded ali his efforts to catch
it as it danced about, but finally he got
hold of it and hung on while the majo
! tried to unbuckls the strsps. Then il
came off and rollod the driver in the mud
He got up to watch it. It writhed ant
kicked and throbbed and hoped; an,
whenever 1t would makeA dash to on
/ side or the other the crowd would scatte
. IN order to give it full play. FINAL
J. Ben Wooley set his dog on it, and mos
) exciting conflict ensued, the leg two {
? three times running OF With the dog
: and it seemed likely that the dog woul
j. get whipped. Mr.. Wooley got q crowds
e and aimed blow at the leg with the il
d tent to smash it. But he missed it an
v nearly killed the dog. As soon as tt
# dog retired, M. Wooley whscked
n again and burst it into flinders, and the
e there was peace. Tue major dro'
k home and got his crutches. an
g, since then he has confined himse
70 to the use of q wooden leg wltho1
5. springs.