St. Landry democrat. (Opelousas, La.) 1878-1894, 1882-11-04
Spsopendyke's Shaving.

Spe0pendyhe>s Sha'ihs'
my dearr' exclaimed Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, dropping his razor and examining
his chin with startling eyes. my dear.
bring me some court-plaster, quick!
rve ploughed off half my chin:
LET me see.' demanded Mrs.
Spoopendyke. bobbing up and 1lutter-
inc around her husband. ''Great gra-
cious, what &C ut. Wait q minute! and
she shot into the closet and out again
"Quickr' roared Mr.. Spoopendy Ike.
I'm bleeding to death! fetch me that
court. plaster!'
"Oh, dearr' moaned Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke. Il put it-oh, where did l put
it9'
"Dod CAST the putty!' yelled Mr..
Spoopendyke. who had heard his wife
imperfectiy ''\Nhat d ye think this is, q
crack in the wall? Got some notion
that there is draught through here:
Court plaster, | tell YOU. Bring me
some ,urt- plaster before | pull out the
side of this house and get some from
the neighbours"
Just then it occurred to Mrs. Spoop-
endvke that she had put the plasterm the
clock.
Here it is, dearn' and she shipped
off a piece and handed it to him.
Nh Spoopenkyke put it on the end OF
his tongue holding his thumb over the
wound. When it was thoroughly
wetted, it stuck to his finger. while the
carnage ran down his chin. He jabbed
away at the cut but the plaster hung to
his digit until finally his patience was
thoroughly exhausted.
"Whats the matter with the measly
business?' he yelled. Where q ye
buy this plaster? Come Oft, dod gast
YEP and as he plucked it off his finger
it grew to his thumb. "Stick, will ye?
he squealed, plugging at the cut in his
chin. leave 90 that thumb" and he
whirled around on his heel and peggee
at it again. "Why don't ye bring me
some court plaster?' he shrleked, turn
ing on his trembling wife. ''Who asked
,, We for leech? Bring me something
, that knows thumb from chin'' ant
he planted his thumb on the wound ant
screwed it around vindictively. Thu
time the plaster let 60 and slipped VI
to the corner of his mouth.
"Now it's all right. DEAR" smiled
- Mrs. Spoopendyke, anxious to secur
! peace in the family. ats all RICH
nown'
"Think it is, do yep raved Mr.
! Spoopendyke. with fearful grim
= 'Mavbe you've got the sam
. idea that court plaster has! raps 20
> think that mouth was cut with a razor
Nav be YOU are under the impresslo
Z that this hole in my visage was mean
y to succumb to the persuasion of bit c
u u plaster. Come off! Lei 60 that mouth!
u and as he gave it wipe it stuck to tn
Z palm of his hand as though it had bee
born there.
T. Let me try" suggested Mrs: SpooI
/ endvke, Il know how to do it.
' "Then why didn't We do it first?
howled Mr.. Spoopendyke. What oil
e We want to wait until I'd lost three ga
=. Ions of gore for! Oh, you know no
> > to do it! You only want linen bac
IL and a bottle of nnucilage up your side
IS be county hospital. Stick! dod ga
IS over his Jaw" IN hold ye there tt
<. We stick, if hold ye till my wife learl
II something" and Mr.. Spoopendyl
T. pranced up and down the room vii
'e a face indicative OF stern determln
:. ton.
y "Let me see, DEAR said his wife, a
Is preaching him with smile; and gent
IS drawing away his hand she dettly a
\ Is justed another piece of plaster. =
a. q. "1hat was my piece after all
III growled Mr.. Spoopendyke, eyeing t
G. e. lob and glancing at the palm OF his hal
r. Il. to find his piece of plaster gone: 'Y'
ne always come in after the funeral
7yf ii guess you'll find your piece site
OF inc in the other hand, DEAR said Nj
d Spoopepdyke, pleasantly. :, :,
a "Of course you can tell,'' snort
H. Mr.. Spoopenkyke, verifying his wifi
81 assertion with Il glance. ct | h
Le:.. your insight and a pack OF cards
IL hire a shot-tower and set up Tor an
III tronomer!" and Mr.. Spoopendyke. W
IL evidently meant astrologer, wore tt
piece of blood-stained court-plaster
MS ms his hand all day long, rather than
n.y. nit, by taking it oft, that his wife h
bly, ever been right in anything. -Brookl
the se On. ~ Eagle.
my
,,ir Preserves.
,ry