Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1882-08-17
Csnquering . Mule.
Ben Applel,y, of St Louis. had

mule, said the stablcnan, (which
was one Of the kno~ingcst cusses you
ever saw. ! dunno where Ben found
him. bot, one day he came driviH
home with this mule hitched ter the tail
end Of his wagon. He was an innocent
iookin' animal, plump an fat, an
looked like he was goin' 10 be good fer
suihin'. Well. the next day after Ben
got i'm home he tried ter hitch i'm up.
but he wouldn't be hitched. He Jest
everlastin'ly kicked the wagon inter
splintcrs. tie kicked one eend outer
Their stable. an kicked ther stall down.
an kicked everything in sight. Ben
took him ont in the corn-lield one day,
an hitehed i'm 10 A pillow. but he up an
kicked that plow over inter Their next
lot. He was all right under saddle, but
Their mint Ben tried ter hitch i'm ter
anything he Jest kicked it outer sight.
No matter where he was, il things
didn't sut i'm. he lest let himself out
an kicked. Nobody but Ben dast go
near nm. Well. finally he discovered
that everybody was scared OF i'm, an
he get the idee that he was the greatest
mule in that section os Their country.
He had way of cockin' one ear fer
rard an the other backards. an
winkin one eye when any one
came near i'm. a much as to say: Git
on 20 me: I'm Ben Appleby's kickin'
mule an don't yer forgit it When
Ben would be ridin' i'm long there
road an they'd pass another mule. he d
iist Git his ears in position an wink an
grin as much rs ter say: I'm the only
mule in this country. I'm kicker, l
am He seemed 20 understan' that he
bad the dead wood ON Ben. an tibet no
body could hitch i'm TO no sort af vehi-
cl.. lie got chuck. ram. Jam full of
conceif, an Use ter parade hisself aroun'
the BARNARD like he owned the place
Ben made up his mind as how the mule
wouldn't never be no count tell he was
broke to drive in harness. He tried all
sorts 'er ways. He hitched i'm to a
mowip' machine. AM tho result was he
had ter git a new machine. The mule
kicked il all outer shape. He broke up
everything that Ben tried ter hitch i'm
10. Bimehy Ben got mad. He swore
he d take the eonccit outer that animal
if it tux his hull farm. Then he begun
TO study up Their case. til, one day a
man came along with one of them farm
engines what they run th,rishin' mer-
sheens with. Ben saws to I'M. I'll
give yer five doliers if You'll LET me
hitch my mule ter that mrrshecn.'
Git out yer mule seq the man, an
Ben led i'm outer the stable. He
can't pull it, SEE the man. Never
mine. SEE Ben. he kin try IL So he
led the mule out in the road, an the
mHic he knowed in a mint what was
goin' on. He cooked his ears hackards
an forrards. an grinned and sez TO his
self;
'They'm goin' 10 hitch me 10 that
thing. Dog-gone my skin, I'll kick it
inter the next county. I'm Ben Apple
by's kickin mule. am. Watch me
now an see how do IT,.
We'll. Ben an the man got i'm
hitchcd mp Ia the mersheen an he began
10 kick agin ther boilcr-head. He
kicked. an he kicked an he kicked,
but the mersheen never bndged. Ben
an the man sat on the fence watchin'
the job. an the man alaughin' TO kill
hisself. Ben looked kinder satisfied.
but he never fetched smile. Bimeby
the mule settled down on his four legs,
an swung his head aroun' an said to
hisself:
".Wat kline of dog-gone vehicle is
cent. Maybe somethin's the matter
with my legs. III go for it agin, any
how
AN he set his teeth together an
begaa 20 kick agin'. Well, sir he