National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1882-04-22


the paper-Qui=.
DR.. Mary Walker thinks Of marrying andsettlipg
down, but The name OF tho prospective bride ID
not gven.-Phiiadelphid Neus
There's no disgrace in being poor Tho thing is
to keep quiet and not let your neighbors know
anything about it.-Boston Sdr.
The Louisville Courier Journal has h ad lite
in which It calls justice That Sore Eyed MaiGon,
Whose Modest Optics arc Usually in Sling"
Troy lawyer asked woman on the witness.
stand her nge, and she promptly replied: al sold
milk for you TO drink when baby and haven't
got my pny yet"
Marine bicycles are now just about the right
thing There is one advantage in a marine bicy.
Gle not possessed by the other kind-if you fall off
you won't get hurt.
Denver has invited the National Democratic
Convention to meet there two years hence, an
careful housewives arc already beginning TO take
In the washing before dark.
An Irishman says that peach trees ills week
differ from theft or murder in tho fhot that they
are not for buddcn'." Diagram sent on receipt
of three-ccnt stampl- Union Argus.
New York policeman, accused of snoring on
his beat, got off by the explanation that ho wps
only trying confidence game on some thieves no
suspected TO be in the yicinity.--LopcR CH.ea.
An Ohio man on his travels found a shell on tho
Gettysburg battlc-i field. He took Il home and nut
IL In the stove to lift real 1t was genuinet
but the stove is the most glaring imitation you
ever looked at.
The remarks of the two clergymen who o1iciated
at Jesse James funeral were said to have been
Z" full Of comfort to the mourners." No wonder
Bob 1ngersoll makes fun of the pseudo. orthdox
scheme of salvation.
A fruit.growe at Orlando, Fla, employed a
negro boy to eat one thousand oranges and save the
seed. The boy cat ninety three the first day and
then gave up the job In disgust Exchange Maybe
he seed all he wanted.
A Philadelphia servant-girl who did the wor, Nt
family Of sixteen, went West few months 70,
married rich miner, and now can't even get he
meals for herself and husband without twJ SCR
wants TO help her Philadelphia Press.
Miss Jean Armour Burns, great granddaughter
of the Scotch poet, is sixteen or seventeen yearS
old and bears striking resemblance To her great
ancestor. She and her mother earn n scanty living
by busting the pews of DUN res III oh.
There arc millions of pins used every hour and
the wonder is what becomes of them. As wo
shivor over the stove o-day we wish now that one
might have been arranged In the lap Of sprlrg
before winter sat down In it-Atington Argus.
come-and. gaze-o n-me drummer, travelling
for Chicago firm, after satisfying his hunger tho
table of a Western hotel, summoned lady walter,
and asked: !" Have you any porterH" "Yes, we
have three or four, but they are all colored" was
her answer.
Philadelphia has worried along pretty comfort
ably for fifly years without superintendent OF
public schools, but now there is movement
| toward appointing such an official. Certain mem
bers of the board of education, however, develop
asIubborn opposition
Two young ladies of Chester, Pa lately rer-
formed quite delicate surgical operation A pet
c'nary having broken one of its legs they set Il
| limb and applied tho spllnts and bandagcs The
| bone shows sins of knitting. and there Is every
| prospect that the bird will recover.
The brokers, or agents de change, at Paris, arc
| limited by law to sixty, and each member pays .
caution money ofs5O,OOO, while the profits arc so
large that the seats sell at from 100000 $500
| The agents dc change are said 10 have made during
| the past year 100000 in conn sions.
The Brooklyn Unton.Argus says that tho Duke
of Westminster, who is fif(y.seyen years old, ard
| who is about to marry Lady CaYendlsh. wi Is
| thirty years younger, has income of ST. 90 a
| day from ground rents alone" Oil come now,
won't you come down { oil ar or two dayH
| A member of the Cana Ian Parliament, who
| has worn flowing silver locks and beard entered
| the House the other day with the ornaments dyed
jot black. So great was the change that few Of
the members knew him, and one who did rose and
| moved writ for n new election In North Perth,
| whore an honorable colleague had dyed.
The scottsville (Va) Courier is authority for Tho
| following: "a gentleman living at Glendower
| Altemarle County, has musical hen that sh huld
| be secured by some Snowman to exhibit alongside
the educated hog and the trained dogs. The hon
1t Is said, will MARBLE the sweetest melodies and
stops or changes the tune at the bidding OF her
trainer, boy of ten or twelve years.
| AdamsCobltc stone is found In only one place In
| the world, and that is the State of Missouri Tho
| company which now owns the whole quarry vii,
transport the stone quGrried to Winchester, N H.
where II is to be mi nuactured into such articles
| rs are deemed salabe. The stone is very peculiar
| In Its structure and properties. Its cutting power
is diamond.like, cutting away steel very rapidly,
and still retaining an exceedingly fine edge.
The clergymans daughter kneeled down and
| prayed at a revival meeting with the "worst fell
| low in town" at Bedford, Ind, and when she got
home missed her gold watch. She would not be-
lieye he took II, but consented 10 go with party
of friends and hunt him up. They found him ut
his devotions under tree. She refused to have
him disturbed, but rude skeI tic rushing In where
| angels feared to tread found him kneeling In tic
act of burying the watch.
II is related that having tested the generosity Of
Mr.. Greeley TO the utmost, the late Mr. Vanderbilt
wanted another loan, Cant do it," said II. G..
| "you owe me too much already" "Only 500 for
six months" NO, sir" "For three months
then" "No, sir" "For thirty days" "No,
| no, no; you might die" "Who ever heard
| of a man borrowing money for thirty days aud
then dying?' Horace handed out the amount,
the argument was too convincing
The man deserving the name, ga perfect man."
is one whose thoughts and exertions for olLe 8
rather Than himself whose high purpose Is
adopted on Just principles, and never abandoned
while Heaven or earth afford means of accom-
| plishing II, He Is one who will neither seek an
| indirect advantage by spetious word nor take an
evil path TO secure zeal good purpose. Such a
man is one for whom wOmans heart should beat
constant while he breathes and break when lie
dies.
The Boston Commercial Bulletin thinks that too
mech sympathy has been was ed Oh the two hun
dred girls recen ly blhCa oi by the King 4
AShantee. 1t premises that tho King was attend
ing the theatre at which the two hundred 81 ID
were present, decked in Gainesborugh hats,
when he ordered the hats removed. Itdid not oc-
cur to the King that the heads of girls who wore
such hats could contain anything worth saving,
and 80 the heads were removed along with tho
hats.
An exchange says: ''Last summer a Phi
phia photographer at Asbury Park took mn Inter.
esiing picture of a Brooklyn yOuug man und lis
lady love seated on the sandy beach, backed by
the halo OF u Japanese umbrella. The young muu
only recently learned that the picture was IN ex.
istence and he sent TO The hotogrNPher to buy II
as a reminder of the happy hours he had spent al
The seaside The photograph came. There was a
young man and maiden fair to view, listening in.
| tently to what the wild waves were saying There
was an arm encircling the waist Of the maiden,
and that maiden was his own inamorata; but
alas the ann that oncirced herwas not his, but
belonged TO some other fellow. The match Is de-
| oil o0