The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1882-01-05
The Very Sad Tale Of New-fears-Dsy
Young Man.

Cmyth Van Dyke stood before MS i1irfor
Yesterday morning adjusting his breast
protecting scarf lie had Just inserted the
prize-package diamond pin, and was view
inc the reflection with evident pride. lie
had ON his extra-tight-tittin double-seamed
trowsers: while his too shortly cut GETAWAY
law over the foot-board OF his bed waiting
10 be nodded on his manly form. Al
together. he was budding, happy
New-Year Young man. He turned with
a sjch from the glass. and with diff
Guilty urrayed his body in the aforesaid
utterly-utier coat. Taking up an envelope,
he drew out a pair OF orange Kid gloves,
doubIe-stitched and embroidered backed.
He was about to don his broad-brim brown
Derby-the latest-when there was rap
at the door.
"Cmythy, dear"
"Ya-as, ma"
81 have a 800 bill | wish you would
change for me-"
Cmyth felt in every pocket, and at last
exclaimed, Really, ma, | hayn't got the
exact change"
Mrs. Van Dyke then, in persuasive tones,
Informed her eldest born aud hope that she
was greatly in need OF the change. and that
she would have 10 trouble him to run
around the corner to the grocery and get
the bill changed. Cmyth was somewhat
crestfslen as be left the house by the back
door, but he was much richerin pocket. IL
was lust after ~ O'Clock, and the corner
grocery man had decided to give his errand-
bow holiday, and had closed. SO Cmyth
walked on block or two, looking for
shop Of any proportion that would warrant
his entering and asking the owner to change
a 500 bill. At last he saw seductive
looking sign, reading "Saloon." Cmyth
had always heard that saloon-keepers were
rich. ard on a holiday he thought he might
be able to get the bill changed, so he enter
ed. ANA won't mind my spending fifteen
cents TO get it changed" he unused as he
watched the bartender ladle out several
glasses Of egg-nOg. When he had finished,
he turned TO Van Dyke and smiled happy
New-Year smile, and rubbed his hands.
Cmyth meekly asked for a glass Of ''the
same" and gulped ii down in hurry,
and handed out the Si0O bill. The bar
keeper looked mt it. Pulled out his cash
drawer, ran his fingers through the silver,
and looked up. "GOt anything smaller!"
- Not a cent" was Cmyth's reply. " Really,
I'm sorry, but can't change that. When
mer: and he turned to his next customer.
Cvmth left and walked another block.
II was getting late. and bis mother was
waiting for the change. He saw another
seductive sign and entered. The man be-
hind the counter was rs smiling "a ever,
and dipped out the egg-nog with the
same grace as the others, and Van Dyke
drank it with the same celebrity, and pro-
duced the 500 bill. The man picked It
up, turned ii over, found it was good, and
mildly remarked, scot anything smaller"
Cmyth made his answer, and the saloon
keeper remarked, "SOrry can't change;
call in again and pay me-"
Vandyke left in disgust. lie next tackled
a cigar-store, bOughta 2j-cent cigar, lighted
It, and produced the 300. The tobacco
mist was knocked cold. "YOull be pass
Ing this way later; Just drop in and pay
me tlpn. It'll be all the same"
Vmdyke inwardly "cussed" the 300
bill. Seductive signs began to come in
very close proximity. Every one OF the
bar-tmdcrs had the same beautiful New
Year smile: all seemed happy until that
800 ill was produced. II cast gloom
over everything and everybody. No one
had tie exact change, and poor Cmyth be-
gan tC lose track OF the various places he
had to call back to and settle. At last he
came 10 one gloriously lighted up; at least
he thought so, for each light burned double
and swung i'm n circle. The only trouble
he found with the floor was that 1t was
slOped to one side too much. The ldentl-
cal bm-keeper that he had seen ten times
before stood behind Che marble counter.
There was that child-llke smile, that charm
Ing grace of movement, and that diamond
pin!
"Sgive SINE glass Of S'egg-nog,' and
Cmyth leaned against the counter. lie
drank it. '.Se-et 'em up s'again," he
murmured. as he finished one glass. The
accommodating young man did so, and
Vandyka drank it and produced the 800
bill and flung it on the counter. Don't
you say s'you can't schange it, he said,
''for l'ss got s'to 90 lack s'to s'too many
s'places llready."
avery sorry. | need all my change.
Just cali back tomorrow and settle il. No
matter now," said the clerk; and he LETT
to attend to his business.
Poor vandyke! It was late in the after
noon. He had visited nearly every saloon,
and had egg-nOgg at every place, yet he had
not paid a cent for it, He wandered about
for an hour or so. New-Ycar calls were
out Of the question. 1t was about ii
O'Clock last night when he found himself
or rather he was found-in Monument
Square, ana asking the hacl1men to change
a 800 lin. At last the policeman took
him in charge and put him in hack
and sent him home. When he was
driven up to the door the hackman
helped him ont. Cmyth produced the
800 bill and incoherently asked something
about changing-egg-nog and calling back
again. As he walked up the steps female
form opened the door. Nandyke held out
the 500 bill to her and exclaimed, "S'can
YOU schangc SINE a-a 500" The door
opened wide suddenly, and form in very
tight trowserS and very short coat and very
broad-brim brown hat disappeared inside.
The hackman saw no baltimore
american.
Murderers ~ - Ladies'" ~ PETS.