Brookings County sentinel. (Brookings, Dakota [S.D.]) 1882-1890, 1882-04-20
SPICE AND AllSPiCE.

4
The German word schwer means, in
English, difficult; yet it is not difficult to
schwer in English.
WRITE plainly on all postal cards.
The time of postmistress is valuable.
I-LoniSuiite Coarier-Jouyna,.
The speaker of the house is generally
known as "the chaiy," SO called because
he Is sat down on SO often.-Miss Win
mex.
TIE word daughter" is always print
ed in the speech of a congressman 20
the reader may know when to laugh
Picdyune.
SILVER dollars with holes in them are
painfully numerous, but they are not
falf SO p,irfully numerous as holes
without any silver dollars in them.
WHY do elderly spiustels have a pre-
dilection for parrots? Well they have
no man about the house, and they want
something around that can swear..-3oS-
ton Post
The intelligent compositor left out the
letter d IN Il paragraph about beauti-
ful actress, aud informed the public
"that crows flocked to see her wherever
she went"
IT is pleasant to remember that not
an hour passes in the increasing march
OF time that there is not balf-dresstd
man some where Oh the face Of the earth
calling for a sbilt.
The number of bones in n nan. We
are told, is 2i0. Just after partakmg OF
shad breakfast the number may bc in.
creased to 2j0--if the man doesn' t choke
tg, hn
toUn He.a,d.
"No, SIR, said the Michigan Repub-
lican, visiting Washington, "I don't
vote for that man Horr, again. Why,
he actually laughed at joke made by
democrat. Is that sticking tothe paIty?"
-RostOn Post
The wild, uututorcd compositor in
formed the readers that certain book
was "full of merit as nest" when it
was written "as full Of meat as o nut"
His corps now awaits the ecoroner.-Ne,C
Haren Register.
The czar gets blowed up by his wife
for flirting with a circus girl, and is in
constant fear of dynamite explosion.
We wouldn't be czar, circus girl thrown
in, for less than $40 a wcek.--Ncp
Hacen Register.
BARNUM having secured Jumbo
Forepaugh is now looking around for an
attraction that will excel il. If he wants
a bigger English "claphaut' than
Jumbo, let him briug over Ireland
NorristOUP Heraid.
A CORRESPONDENT asks: Can a boy
leave his father when lie is eightcsn
years Old?" Ii fithrr l. eighteen
years old SOD is justified in leay-
ing him, because he Ought by that time
to be able to take care Of himself
4 PAPER watch, in good running order,
has been exhibited by Dresden watch
maker. Evidently made from a news
paper, the subscription OF which has
been running on time" for several
years. Herald.
A STRONG superlative: "Yes, sir,"
said the Kentuckian: 81 never was in a
more tantalizing position in my life
There were three of us, with pack If
cards, in the room and not deuccd cent
in the crowd. ."-Boston Post.
SoPHRoNIA "Can Senator David
Davis, as president of the senate, il
drawn as juror. be compelled TO sit on
a lury?" We don't know. II he can,
we wouldn't like TO be one Of the jury
that he would sit on.-SomcrUiite Jour
nal.
An Austin young man was seen COM
ing hurriedly out Of business house.
which he had entered to solicit employ
ment as salesman. "Did the boss en-
gage you as a salesman ?" "No; he
wanted me to travel" was the amGigu-
Gus reply.-7crds Sjjtiags.
THE Boston Transcript says that an
east Boston lady was recently requested
by the board of health TO have traps
placed under the sinks and basins in her
house, aud when an inspector few days
later examined the premises it was found
that she bad placed there several ret
traps.
In an account of an accident in which
a mail sled broke through the ice OF u
lake In British columbia, the telegraph
says that the driver, by keeping cool,
succeeded in making his way to the solid
ice." 1t probably did not require any
great effort to keep cool under those
circumstances.
A DETACHMENT OF the United States
army WAS discovered prowlipg around
the Jail in which Guiteau is confined,
last night, with their fingers on the
triggers of their rifles. 1t is supposed
they are yearning for m eight years sen
tence and national dime subscription.
--Norristoun Herald.
"AH, dearest" sighed the young man
kneeling at the feet Of his ownest own,
"dost thou know what Of all outward
things is nearest my heart ?" Really,
can't say" she replied; "but if You
have any regard for your health in this
chaugeable weather, l should think it
was a flannel shirt" She was too prac-
teal, and it broke the engagement.
A CARPENTER went to be shaved at a
BARRIERS. in uasi-aristocratic heiRh-
hood near London. The barber stepped
forward with" Very sorry, my map,
but we don't serve the working classes
here" "Why," retorted the son of toll,
81 see YOU shave bricklayer here this
morning." "Ah, yes" replied the bar-
Der. "it is true; but we have drawn the
line at bricklayers."
HE sat at The piano, and she stood be-
side him, her hand lovingly lying on his
shoulder. He was running over the nc
commandment to "The Lost Chord"
"How do love Sullivan's works; don't
you, julio, dear?" he asked, looking up
iu her eyes. eyes, do, Gns; dn.n't
he Just pound she life out of Ryan,
thought" Then he kissed her.-Syed-
case Times.
An lrishman one day came running
INTO farm. yard and hurriedly cried out
for spade. The farmer, coming out,
demanded what he wanted with il, when
Pat replied that bis friend had stuck in
a bog, and he wanted to dig him out.
"How far is be in ?"inquired the farmer.
"Up TO his ankles, said Pat. "Is that
all p said the farmer. "Then he can
pull himself out again. You'll yet no
spade here" Pat, scratching his head,
while his face bore evident signs Of
grief, blurted out, Och. but, be Jabers,
he's in head frstr