Smyrna times., 1882-05-24
Current Comment.
PHILADELPHIA EVENING NEWS.


The trcut-ishing season has opened and
merchants who want a vacation kave
stopped advertising.
More than 10000 Americans will go TO
Europe this summer. People who don't
like to run with the mob will have to stav
at home.
a West Chester paper heads an article
" A Spanking Team" We have not read
it, but the team is probably IN elder sister
and an aunt.
In Nanderbilts's new house there are
three miles of gas pipe. No wonder the
whole family have closed up the establish
ment and fled to Europe
How does it happen that some railroad
men on very ordinary salaries get SO much
money head?-Erchange. Perhaps their
wives make their own bounets
Oscar says the Chinese should remain
because they have an artistic value.
They caG beat the whole artistic world at
starching shirt bosom, that's fact.
n fashion exchange says: D." Neck ribbons
are more frequently tied on one side than
in front" and the Boston Post kindly calls
Guiteaus attention to this new fashion.
Polydipsia is the Boston name for thirst.
When suffering from polydipsia the Boston
man calls for spiritus frumenti and then
washes it dewn with protoxide Of hydro
gen.
paper butterfly on some projection in
the wall is The proper thing for i parler
Row. Heretofore the only place where
you could see The butterfly was in the
dining room.
The caterpillar Of the silk-worm, when
developed fully is 10000 times heavier
than when il comes from the egg. 1t
grows as fast as boy after YOU begin TO
! buy tr0wsers for him.
There is a man over in Brooklyn that
we think may be likely some day to sue
coed Emerson. a lady informs US that
You cannot understand blessed word
he says. but he talks beautiful. "
Our great men are passing away 50 fast
that the autograph collectors arc concen
trating their strength with redoubleC
energy ON the few that are left. These
few will be ready enough to 90 when the
time comes.
All evils cure themselves in time
Travelling Americans have spent so mucl
money abroad that Europeans have nov
enough cash ahead to make visit to thi
country. Incoming steamers are crowded
with tourists
Chicago is to have great summe
palace Of amusement and recreation. !
small room in the tower will be fitted VI
for scientific lectures, and if space can b
found in the apartment a library will b
provided. The rest Of the palace will b
| UeN0LSO 10 Deef.
What Iunatic asylum is that 2" aske,
a stranger III Philadelphia, pointing to
building from which the most horribl
, sounds were issuing. why, my dea
, SIR" was the reply, that is not lunati
, asylum. That is a female seminary thi
is music-practice hour
II is said that certain poet . is kept S
busy answering requests for his auto
graphhs that he hasn't time to atten
to his friends letters He must be tn
husband of the woman who has sue
time with her poor, sick dog tina
she can't spare a moment to her children
, A Quaker missionary baptised Il conver
in Mexico, contrary to the law Of hi
church, and on returning to his home i
Indiana was reprimanded by the Quake
l quarterly conference. His defense wa
that the convert insisted on being In
: mersed, Baptist fashion, and as the ma
f needed bath, anyhow, it was hard to Sc
$ what harm it would do.