Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1882-04-08
Saturday Smiles.

"A Ford Ogden man has a contract to deliver
5000 alligator hides to st. Louis firm by May
]. Evidently $50 pairs of shoes are to be made
for st. Louis belles-Bost0n Post.
-Four Milwaukee faro banks were busted
last week, and one could hardly get calm an
swer from any citizen in the town. Everybody
argued that it was the beginning of another
financial crisis-Detroit Free Press
Two drinks a day, remarks an exchange
will supply family with -four. This, of course
refers to the saloon keepers famiy-Swa-
c,Ise Herald
He knew it was April l. and didn't propose
to be fooled and when they told him his chimney
was afire and likely to burn the house, ne
said: "Let her burn" And they did No
insurance.
The Chief Justice of the Irish Common
Pleas, who Is known as "Moichy Morris" is
which gave much amusement to the House OF
Commons during the short time he was there.
Recently young junior rose timidly to make
his first motion in court. who possessed q hard
northern brOgue. between which and the
western there is wide distinction. "Sapel,"
said the Judge, leaning over to his clerk of
court. g hew is this fallah p Ellis name is
Hammond, my lord" pause. "Sapel, fhaat
part OF the cOOnthry does he come from ?"
g From County Donegal, my lord" Another
pause. Sapel, did yez ivir cO0me across SIGH
lofe?"
Together they were looking over the paper
''Oh my. how funny she said. "what is it,"
he asked: why here's an advertisement that
says: No reasonable offer refused "What's
so odd ABOUT that ?" "Nothng, nothing" she
replied, trying to blush. "only those are exactly
my sentiments" If that young man hadn't
taken the hint and proposed right then and
there she would have hated him.-Rome Sen
tinel.
An Illinois man. with foresight worthy of
better cause, popped the question on a rail-
road train, and now the maiden is at loss to
decide as to which county she had better COM
mence proceedings in for breach of promise
1t is said that " coal is king" Perhaps some
OF 1t is, but the last lot that came into this office
was dust.-&. Louis Hornet. Well, all kings
that are not dust are going to be dust sooner or
later.-TeSds Siftinqs
II. O. Mel, Detroit, Michigan ssWhat kind
of climate do you have in Texas at this season
of the year 2" We usually have q mild semi
in the last consignment received there were
some chunks Of climate that did not belong to
US packed with the rest Of the goods e1as
Sffings.
swearing, and mamma, to punish him, washed
him thoroughly inside Of his mouth with soap
suds, 'tO," a. she explains to him. 'sclean away
the naughty words" A few days later, while
passing the bathroom. she sees the yOungster
with his face one mass Of suds and his month 80
full that she barely understands his spluttering
| ordinations: Getting them all out, mamma!
Swore five times yesterday" Hartford Times
Clinching his point: electricity. sir, Will
be the death Of steam" ssBut how do Won
obtain all this electricity" 'Bysteam. "-Chari-
carl.
True benevolence: Fogg says he never
finishes cigar but he thinks, s'Another temp
tatlon removed from the young men Of
America! ~ ossom Irnnscripg
A correspondent wants to know where the
expression ssLet mp" comes from. We believe
| It comes from the fellow who isn't on top In the
| ght.-Phil1delphia SIM.