Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1882-05-26

"A L :, MA Y 70, 1857
bath-day durin' full half that long period.
Amt pattern for the deestrict in mat
tiers Of ekonomy What would have be-
KUN of Betsy Ann if hadn't done so 2
| don't purtend to be judge of win.
mems goods and fxin 3, but I've obsarved
that she don't spend much of my money
on bunnits. She knows my sentiment too
well on them pints. and don't waste her
time a-gaddin' round to see the fashions
such. She's stay-a-home woman
and workin' woman, she is, and if dc
say it, she's a pattern just as much as
am. Why, it cen almost tux our breth
away one Sunday mornin' when we seed
our minister's wife a-kummin' inter the
meetin'-house with new bunnlt on. all
klvered up with flowers and fethers. Sum
body sed twas an Easter or Wester, we
forgot which, for we don'tkeep them pagin
days like The 'Piscopals and Romans. We
know better. We rel ice in the lite while
they walk on in darkness; but as a-sayin
me and Betsy Ann was dredfully distrest
! over it. And when we got hum, SEE she
to me, SEE she: "What an example to our
young folks You oughter to 60 right over
there, Jeremiah, and labor with 'em about
it,
The next mornin' went over to the par.
sonage, and .kerried sum specked apples
| thQt WI xuy,y YNinr3 To For
alwaz takes somethln' with me whom
goes to see the minister's family-it's a
sacred dooty. tackled Mr.. Nicodemus
about it. He said the bunnit wuz pres
ant from somebody who wuz here last
| summer. suppose it wuZ sum of them
| city folks who was a-doin' nothin,' and
spendln' their money at the tavern-''sum-
merin - believe they call it. Anyhow
felt an inward call to labor with the
minister spell longer, and to tell him in
plain words that he mustn't allow any of
his family to indulge in extravaganza,
whether it costs him anything or not. We
pay him four hundred dollars year, when
we can raise it-that's what he wuz called
| on-and I've often laid awake nights
thinking that he must be a-layin up money
and it's wrong for ministers to do that; the
Scripters is all agin it.
He has wife, seven children and an old
uncle on his hands, to be sure, but then
we only charge him fifty dollars year for
the use of the parsonage, and there ain It
many folks that get their rent as cheap as
thai. We use it to pay the insurance and
keep the house in repair. Fertatoes and
brown bread are cheap that's our living
mainly, and what s good enough for US is
good enough for anybody. And then ,agin
1 don't $50 why the minister should be
obliged to entertain the whole tribe of
Gadites, and half the tribe of Manassar,
and spend our money in feedin' 'em. Why,
its wus than flock of Egyptian locusts to
see the folks that 60 a-tramppin' in and
out of our parsonage in the course of q
year. We don't hev any kumpany. We
did hev man and woman lite down on us
onst. but they didn't stay long, She ssd
that her mother was third cousin to my
wife great aunt, but we never seed 'em
afors they came a-driving into our door
yard. was a-spllttin' kindlings and Betsy
Ann she was a-settin' milk pans out to dry
in the sun when we heerd sumbody cry out:
why, how do you do, Cousin Jeremiah !?
How do you do, Cousin Betsy" We thot
sumthin' queer was a-kummin, and when
that air woman jumped out of the Vaughn
and told the man who druv the team to
take out the trunks and bandboxes, I riz
right up and told them we had no komo-
dations for kumpany, and they'd better
go on the tavern. My punkins how that
female did splatter. They had traps enuf
with them to stay a month, but 1t was
rite in buyin' time, and they didn't find
the atmosfear congenial, 80 they left in
hurry, and we've never seed them since.
Well, as l was a-sayln', 1 wrastled and
demonstrated with Mr.. Nicodemus, and
told him that folks was a-talkin' bout him
and Mis- Nicodemus, havin too much COM
pany. He looked rather cut up, and sed
that the Scripters taught us to entertain
strangers and show hospitality. Isurmis-
ed that he had heerd sumthin' about the
strangers who had lit on US, and how we
got rid of them; and made up my mind
that if he was a-goin' to put me down in
that way, I'd tell Mr.. Staryemout when
he kums round for my subscription of ten
dollars for next year, that should cut it
down one-half. 1 don't mean to keep
public house for nothing and l amt a.
goin' to have the minister spend any of my
money in dom it nuther.
These ERE ministers have got to be kept
down, or they'll get high-minded. They
are the servants of the people, and l for
one think they oughter DO reminded Of it
from time to time. Human natur' is very
frail, even in the best on US, and although
our MIR. Nicodemus is most always a SUD-
dued sort of man, we mustn't let hlm
get too independent. P'r'aps sumbody
may think that Pm sayin' too much about
the minister and too little about the skool-
house. but I amt forgot my subject by no
means.
Just because Square Jones-who has
been travelln' this fall, and has seed
whole lot of new things in the way of ed
ication-thinks that the deestrlct oughter
hev new skoolhouse, the whole nabur-
hood has get crazy over it. dent know
as can purYent it, but am goin' to raise
my voice and use my influence agin it,
I've been deekin nigh on to forty year,
and I've passed through more seems and
unsesns than anybody else in the kummu-
nifty.
These ERE new tangled notions that
Square Jones has been a-talkin' about
such as skools. skool-buks, and implements
be put down; the only imple-
ments we need are agricultooral imple-
ments, and as for skool-buks, the old ones
ara mood emf Talk about advanced IDEAS