The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1882-02-02
HELP In THE KITCHEN.
A Western Lady's Supposed Experiences
With Her Servants.

N Htstcih Lady'S supposed Experiences
With Her Servants.
II desire to advertise for a girl to
do general homework" said Lara
mle lady to the business man OF the
Nye Boomerang. Il have had some
little trouble and annoyance during
the past year, and would like, if |
could, to get good girl who would
differ IN many respects from those !
have been wrestling with. Last fall
l heard of a good girl who was work
ing for neighbor of mine and went
to work Systematically to get her. |
found out afterwards that it was put
UP job on me, and that the neighbor
wanted me to get the girl more out OF
revenge than anything else. The
girls name was Cleopatra. She
wanted 1927 per month and the use OF
the piano. I was so sure that she was
a good girl that engaged her on that
lay out. Cleopatra had so many
lovers that we had to move the sofa
into the kitchen on Sundays, and my
husband and myself sat around the
floor, while Cleopatra wooed the fes-
tive mule-puncher. We wanted to
throw all the home influence we could
around Cleopatra, so that she would
feel perfectly cheerful, and like one
of the family, she used to wear my
dresses when | was away, but when |
asked her to let me wear her wardrobe
she seemed hurt; and her whole sys-
tenn was churued up with convulsive
sobs. By-and-by my dresses got kind
OF shabby, as the result Of continuous
wear by Cleopatra and myself, and
she got discontented and went away.
Then got nice girl from Nebraska;
but just as she had learned to make
pie that would yield to the .softening
influence of time, she married a man
from Bitter Creek, who was so cross
eyed that, when he wept the scalding
tears would roll down the back of his
neck. then secured girl from the
old country. She couldn't speak the
English language huently, and so we
didn't have a very sociable time OF it.
When / would tell her to wash the
dishes. she would generally black the
stove or bring in scuttle of coal. |
used to pour out my soul to her some
time and ask her to confde in me,
but she had far. away look, like a
man who cannot pay his board bill.
One day at dinner I asked her to
bring in the desserts, but she didn't
grasp my meaning and, through some
. oversight. brought in the dish-rag on
tray. She used to wash the chill
dren's faces with the stove-rag, and
brushed their hair with the shoe
brush, and in that way soon won their
esteem and regard. One day while
we were at the table she brought in
the soup, and in an unguarded mo-
ment stuck about seven inches of her
thumb in the hot soup, in order to get
more secure grip on the turreen. In
the first impulse of coy and maidenly
surprise she thoughtlessly dropped
the turreen and soup into my hus-
bands lap. My husband is shy and
rather reticent man, but he arose with
a graceful movement to his full height
and killed her with the carving knife,
and kicked her CORY remains under the
table. After the inquest | got a
hollow-eyed girl from Fort Collins.
She was an orphan, with pale hair
that she used to work up in the hash.
She was proud and impulsive in her
nature and ate everything in the
house. We used to hear her in the
middle Of the night foraging around
after cold pie, and fragments of rich
and expensive grub. She had sin
gular yearning for jam, and an impas-
stoned longing for preserves that we
never succeeded in quenching. When
the jelly and fruit cake gave out, she
would sadly turn her attention to cold
ham and mustard, with the shoulder
ing ruins Of baked beans, and cold
cabbage and vinegar. We stood it
till groceries came up SO, and apples
got to be ST so barrel, and then we
asked her to send in her resignation.
What I would like now is good girl,
not SO much as companion and con-
fidential promoter of financial ruin,
but more to wrestle with manual labor
in the kitchen, at so much per wrestle
and board. I'm not difficult to please,
but I don't want to pay the same
salary the cashier of bank gets, just
for the sake Of having a pampered
menial in the house who doesn't dc
enough work to drive away her
ennui."