The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1882-12-24
IELEGRAPHICI
r1LGRIn FATHERS DAY.
The IBanquet.and celebration
in New York.

in New York.
New York, 22.-The seventeenth an
nual dinner of the New England Society
took place at Delmonic0's this evening
Josiah MeFiGher presided. Among
those on the platform were Gen. Grant,
Mayor Grace, Judge Lswerence, Rev
ARCHER Brooks, Chsuncey M. Depew
and Governor Bigslow, Of Connecticut.
The general arrangements were Ii The
hands of Hon. Stewart l.. Woodford, ex-
Governor Long, Of Massachusetts,. Ro6t.
L. McCurdy, Col. Villas, Rev. DR.. Up
shur. Mark Twain, Gen. Horace Porter
End Senator Miller Of California, were
among the guests. The large dining hall
was crowded. Senator Miller, in reply
TO the toast OF "Cradle Of the Com mon
wealth" said that the wealth
founded by thej pilgrims was q self
rocking cradle.
Mark Twain responded to the toast of
woman" He sid: The toast includes
the sex universally; it is to woman COM
prehensively whereBoever she may be
found. Let Us consider her ways. First
comes the matter Of dress. This is q
most important consideration, and must
be disposed of before we intelliRently
proceed to examine the profounder
depths of the theme. For q text
let us take the dress Of the antip.
odal Types the savage woman OF
Central Africa, and the cultivated daugh-
fer of our high modern civilization.
Among the Fans "a negro tribe) 8
woman when dressed for home, or to go
shopping, or calling does not wear any
thing at all but just her complexion.
[ Laughter) That is, it is all her ward
robe. 1t is the lightest costume in the
world, bat is made Of the darkest ma
terial. It has often been mistaken for
mourn ping. 1t is the trimmest, and neatest,
and grRcsfullest costume thst is now in
fashion. II wears well; is fast color:
doesn't show dirt; you don't have to
send it down town to have it washed and
have some of it come back seorched with
fatirons, and some with the buttons
ironed off, and some of it petrifed with
starch, and some of it chewed by the
calf, and some Of it rotted with acids,
and some Of it changed for other custom
era things that. haven't any virtue but
holiness, and ten-twelfths of the pieces
overcharged for. and the rest of the
dozen ''mislaid," and it always fits. II
is perfection of Q 6t, and it is
the handiest dress in the whole realm Of
fashion. 1t is always ready,
make a call the servant
never says "please take seat; madame
is dressing; she'll be down in three-quar-
tiers of an hour" No, madame is always
dressed, always ready to receive COM
pany; and before yeu can get tho door
mat before your eyes she is in your
midst, Again, the fair ladies don't 90 to
church to see what esch other has got
on, and they don't GO home to elAnder.
Such is the dark child of savagery ss to
every dag toilet, and thus curiously
enough she finds point of contact with
the fair daughters. Of civilization and
high fashion, who often has nothing to
wear" and thus these widely separated
types Of the sex meet upon common
ground. Yes, such is the fact with women
as she appears in unostentatious every dsy
toilet, but On state occasions she is more
dressy. at o banquet she wears brace
lets. At q lecture she wears earrings
and belt; at ball she wears stockings,
and with true feminine fondnees for dis
play she wears them on her arms; at O
funeral abe wears q jacket of tar and
ashes; at wedding the bride who can
afford them puts on pantaloOns: Thus
1.-THE dark child Of savRgery, and fair
daughters Of civilization meet once more
on common ground, and
these two touches of nature make
the whole world akin. Now we will
consider the dress of oul
other type. a large part Of the daugh-
ter of civilization is her dress, as it should
be. Some civilized women would lose
half their charm without dress and SOM
would lose all of it. A daughter o
modern civilization dressed g. her utmos
best is marvel Of exquisite and beauti
ful art and expense. All the lands, al
the climes and all the arts are laid upde
Tribute 10 furnish her; her linen is from
Belfast, her robe is from Paris, her lac
is from Venice, OF Spain, or France; he
feathers are from the remote regions @
lsouthern Africa; her furs are from tn
lremote home Of the iceberg and the au
irorR; her fans are from Japan; her die
monds from Brazil; her bracelets from
California; her pearls from Ceylon; he
canoes from Rome; she has gems an
trinkets from buried Pompeii and other
THAT graced comedy Egyptian forms; be
watch is from Geneva; her card case
from China; her hair is from-I don
know where; her other hAir-her Sunda
hRir-I don't mean the hair she goes {
bed with, you ought to know the hair
mean, 1t is that thing which she calls
switch and which resem hles switch Q
much IS it resembles briokbat or she
lgun, or any other thing which you cor
meet psople with, Il is tbs
thing which sha twists an
then coils round and round her hea
beehive fashion. and then tucks the en-
in under the hive, and hsrpoons it wit
q hair pin. And that reminds me of
Itrihs. Any time you want to you ca
lRlance around the carpet of q Pullms
lear, &Rd &c and pick up O hair pin, BIZ
not TO save your life can you get an
woman in that car to acknowledge ths
hair pin. Now, isn't that stranger BIZ
its true. The woman who had nevc
swerVed from cast iron veracity an
fidelity in her whole life will, when con
fr0nted with this crucial test. dsnv he
hair pin; she will deny that hair pin be-
fore hundred witnesses. I hava Air
Ipidly got into more trouble and more hr
water trying to hunt the owner of haj
pin IN & Pullman car, than by any othe
iindisefetion Of my life. Well, YOU So
what the daughter Of civilization
when she ia dressed, and you hays zee
what the daughter ofisavsRery ia whe
she isn't. Such is woman as to costum,
/ come now to consider her in her hjrhf
and nohler aspects Of wife, widow, GraI
widow mokhaF hiyad 1irl tnIeIe.'