The Evening critic., 1882-04-12
"WAYs THAT ARE STRANGER


And. 20 Bill Nye, Tricks which
smack of Peculiarity-" Pistol. or
NO Pistol, She Shall Never Marry
Youl''
THE CRITIC, ever on the alert to "take notes
and prent en-" hesltatcs not to Invade whom
the chance for something spicy offers ITSELF
1t therefore happened last night while per
ambuiating through that section Of tho city
technically known as the Navy-Yard, that a
CRITIC attache confronted an item of thrilling
interest to the youth and maidenhood OF this
city.
The ship-bells In the Yard had hut sounded
o 0o'clock, when, with the dying echoes OF the
bells, tho sound OF voices in an apparent state
Of great excitement reached THE CRITICS
ears. We paused before the threshold OF
two-story frame house, from whence the dis
cord proceeded, and drawing close to the
shutters, pecred through the Stats. The scene
as presented was not only thrilling, but highly
dramatic, forming
vivid Tablcaux
of realistic love, jealousy and despair In the
middle strata of society.
The room contained four persons-an old
lady OF at least three score years, n maiden of
perhaps 1s, small boy and tragical.looking
young man with seven-shooter I'm his hand,
his face flushed with excitement and his blonde
hair disheveled.
"Thc climax has been reached /" exclaimed
the latter person. 81 have been insulted, and
that love which bear for you, Ella, has been
rldiculed To-night-right now-we must
act or the consequences upon your head, II
End Both Our Lfyes!"
con Ed, for Gods sake do not-do not tall,
that way Be more calm Let us reason
over the matter, and I'm sure ma will re-
"Neyerl never" piped in the shrill voice of
the old lady. 81 would rather SEQ you buried
than to marry that miserable scoundrel."
MADAM, be careful, or I may forget your
age and SEX" returned the young man with
"Do you dare threaten me, Leave this
house. Pistol or no pistol, she shall never
marry you."
'Ella, do you still refuse to marry me?
Speak, and speak quicS?"
Here he raised the pistol threateningly and
the frowning muzzle pointed directly at the
window through which THE CRITIC emissary
was peeping. We withdrew a few paces OF,
the "wisdom and valor' score, expecting
nomentarily to hear the
Death-DeaIing weapon
begin its work. But 1t didn't and above the
voices In the room we heard shout, Charlie
has comet" followed by high pitched male
voices and a series of thumps, bangs and zips.
The front door few Violently open. Charlie
and Ed, locked in deadly embrace, tumbled
out upon the pavement. They fought until
Ed said he was satisfied with the result, and
was let up. Charlie then cautioned him never
70 como into East Washington again, for IL he
did, nothing but his life would appease him.
Ed, bleeding and tattered, proceeded to-
ward the street-car line, while Charlie, tho
opportune hero, re-entered the house to re-
ceive loving encomiums from fair and fright
ened Ella.
THE CRITIC stood revolving In its mind lust
how Charlie had gotten into the house at the
critical moment whom the holocaust seemed
TO be about TO begin, when the query was an
sWered by hearing the boy excaim; eyes,
mann, found him at the grocery store" The
boy had slipped out and informed Charlie
and he had responded, probably ayerting both
murder and a suicide. And thus Cupid and
the green-eyed monster nearly caused dual
game Of death.