The semi-weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1882-1886, 1882-08-12
s1ox,rnss m TN FAMILY.
0r0. 0poopeukyko'O Un1brtunoto
Attack o( Oho3oIa
AorbuD.

1focbuO.
"Oh, deaE:" grunted Nm. Spoopen-
dyke, "I'm sure I'm going 70 dio!''
and the good woman Topped over In
the bed, ard contemplated her hes
hand With pale faee and Q look o(
genersl debility. You will be good
70 hahy, won't you deay?'
''Oh, ho!" returned Mr.. Spoopen.
dyke, pounding her tenderly on tie
head with his Gig hand. "You're all
right. Bear up against It, and you'll
Ire we'll In an haur or two. I've
often had the eh0lesa morbus, hut
yoa never zee me give up like this.
Where's the ginger?'
II don't Know" moaned Nm.
Spoopendyke. look on the top
shelf of the closet. II II isp't there
try the bottom drawer Of the ward
rObe, or 1t may BE- In the pantry.
Ow.w!" and Mrs. Spoopeudyke
doubled up and straightened out
with . jerk.
"YOu can't remember any other
Congressional districts represented
~ that ginger, can your growled
Mr. spoolendyke, providing around
the room IN an atmIess, but energetic
fashion. "You don't call to mind .
couple more roosting places In which
that ginges II to b. found, do your
Where bouts on the top shelf:' aud
Mr.. Sp0opendyke ratified around
among the old bottles and empty pill
boxes. Look here! I've found that
cOurt-pl;ster I wanted day hef0re
yesterdy," and more than gTatified
with his find Mr.. Spoopendyke ut
terly forgot the original object Of his
search.
"You'l send baby to q good school,
and see that size marries happily,
dear::' groaned Mrs. Spookendyke,
adopting . won,an's style OF limiting
that the ginger would be acceptable.
"And you'll bury me by mother"
'Certainly," replied Mr.. Spropen-
dyke, immersed in the contemplation
Of the c0urt-piaster. "Where's the
sheet Of flesh color that was here"
he demanded. II don't seem to
detect the presence Of that particular
element u adhesivenszs! Where's
the 1esh colored portion Of this cura-
tive:" and Mr.. 6p0opendyke ran
over the little squares again In . vain
search for the piece be missed.
Ibid you look In the wardrobe,
lover asked Mrs. Spoopendyke,
family.
ut isn't here >" growled Mr.. Spoop-
endyke. raking out the contents Of
the drawer and turning them over
with bis ft<t. "Whst! Upon my
word! you're u pretty woman! I
thought you said that old razor str0p
of mine was lost when we moved.
Here 1t Is ~ big a. life aud twice as
dirty. Glad I found that strOp,"
mumbled Mr.. SpooE endyke, rubbing
1t tender;y and blOwimg oil the dust.
''GOt q piece Of cloth ~
'Oh, do look IN tile pantry :" plead
I'd Mrs. Spsn,penlyke. "I'm sure it's
in the pantry"
NJ. Spoopen.iyke charged on the
PANTRY like . column Of horses. and
hustled around, and bumped his head,
but didn't seem to meet with much
sucs.ess.
II don't zee any," he muttercd.
Don't you know where you keep
your cloth? Is'pOse / might stand
around here till doos,,s<lay, while the
moths corrnde and thieves do break
into this razOr stTOp aud steal the
whole business, without finding q
piece Of cloth 10 wipe It on. Haven't
gut an old skirt ar something >" and
Sir. Spoopendyke drew the strop un-
der hfs arm tw0 or three times and
regarded Il affectiOnately. s
''Oh. Dlcase lind the ginger!" squeal-
ed An. 6poopendyke, - another
your old strnp! Find the ginger!"
"Ain't I looking for 1t ~ retorted
Mr. Spoopendyke. "Here's . cork,
and the bottle can't Ike far off, When
I iind that bottle. I'll have . c:ew to
the ginger, and I'm going to follow
It to the bitter end. You ought to
save these cOrks anyway, when gt'
fishing. What kind Of . looking bot
tie was 1t ?"
1T was long and narrow" replied
Mrs. 6pDCpentlyke, almost in despair.
II ought to nnd 1t from that des-
criptiOn,' muttersd Mr.. Srnpen-
dyke. Most bottles are perfectly
rDund. Here's the arnica bottle up
side down. and I told you to keep 1t
filed. I might knock my elbow into
the next Presbyterian General As
se,,lbly. and I'd have to wait aDl day
before could gpt . drop of arntca to
soothe my anguish! What's this
straw hat Of mine doing In the hottie
box, anyhow What particular
n,alady did this hat have that sug.
.%,tetl sucl, a disposition Of It ::' and
Mr.. Sl~,olendyke sm0othes1 out the
crown and squiuted with one eye
while he straiyhtened the hrim.
'rlat's y gUOd hat yet" and he put
It on and regarded himself in the
xlass. You wanted SOME ginger,
didn't you: Where h 1t: Where
did you put it::''
Mrs. Spoorendyke arose from the
ix1i. male but firm, aud stalking across
the rUOm seized the bottle and
fl,n,ncssl back into the bed
with . bump that showed she
was mad. -.
There IL nothing on earth that will
20 express q ws.man's wrath as that
one dive among the sheets.
"l;cttimg better, aint ye ~ sn0rsed
Mr.. Sp.n,lxpn.iykc." II told ye the
cho.,ra ,inrbls didn't last long.
Where's my r ,snr strip: What'd "
do with that strOp:'
Mrs. Sp.Opendyke eyed him, but
made no response.
..I'oint out to nle the prescn: adj
,lr.,s, Of that strup!" howlet, Mr..
SyM,pen.lykr. Take this finger
and IL. it tcn.lssly ON the home a,!:!
country Of that d.~i-:,:,<ted stnp:'
and Mr. @rn'lxndyke whir!et!
around like q Irintist"ne. ana hIses!
the air with bottles and bO>es ant!
powders and pills. COM: out "f
the Jungle and face n'e!' ysl eta Mr.
SMs,prmdyke. awstrOVh:zing the
str.,p. which l,c remembered having
i'm his hand but u moment t'ttore.
..Show ne to the strOp: Take that
,,..ssly strOp hy the ear ami lead II
h..f;,re S,,oo,wndvkc In proper per-
LON !" and the emrage.l gentleman.
,hr,,st his foot through the crrwi' 0i
his hat and drew the wreck up {"
his hin.
.What's that sticking out Of your
br<,ast ,rrket, dear" asked Mrs;
Suu,endyke, scraptDg otf externa!
applications Of an assortment o'
~s."E w u.,nto.l Mr. SnOOOen.