Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1882-09-03

AGES.
nsper made the editor say that "the show
ers were not inefficient to meet the wants
of the milk men" etc, instead OF the mill
men,"
As many as fifty Wheeling people at one
time were at the Ocean Hotel, Asoury
Park, during August.
The gas well excursionists could not say
of the Washington iyeryman, "Rogersmy
dog"
The age of q woman Is mentioned but
once in the Bible, Genesis xiii, !, where
it speaks of Sarah's age being one hundred
and twenty-seven years.
Paris for pleasure; London for business
New York for both.
Whist requires silence and attention,
hence the name. s.Gata Elsff "H Pen. -.
Tallyrand says: "If You are in doubt
whether to write letter or not-don'e
aChrisiiansin the turf do lie,
Nor In watery grave would oei
And even fish would sooner die,
On land than in the sea-" g
See who can read these Latin and French
words to make sense in English:
lisa tome her Is ago,
Fortibus e. In aroi
Ft Mobile themis forte trux;
Watts inim? pes an dux.
Arab Pasha is described as tall. heavy
faced man, sullen, swarthy. with only
clear eye to soften the general harshneSs OF
EXPRESSION, and a black mustache TO hide
a badly carved mouth. His legs look too
frsil for the use OF his body. He IS oulky,
broad, thick-chested fellow, built on the
lobster pattern. As spectacle, not pretty.
Rev. Edward steere, d. D., Bishop OF Cen
trail Africa, died lately.
Professor William II. Allen, President OF
Girard College. Philadelphia, died Tuesday,
in the seventy fifty year OF his age.
The ne'siest and most disorderiy conven'
ton of The season. was held In Norwich;
Conn, the other day-the New England
Association of Deaf Mutes.
The ladies are playing polo at Newport
Secretary of the Treasury Folger is not
well, and will shortly leave on q vacation.
/. The P, ], man Of the New York Herald
saws that steele lat intn stirts are preferred
to crinolettes, and he knows.
The proprie er OF certain mineral water
is making $500. 900 year in London. Ii is
popular because it has q jolly, no seRse
name, and the Prince of Wales likes 1t with
his whisky. ...
The remains of Miss Fanny Parneli will
be deposited in the family vault at Boston.
II Won have a fight with fellow about
girl, make it point to get badly walloped
and badly hurt Girls are sympathstic
creatures, and she's bound to pity you and
think the other fellow horrid brute.
A boy was terribly injured while play.
ing with fire, but really he was only lit.
tie son burnt. 1t would have been worse
for him il his mother had come in with
slipper a few moments before the accident,
for then he would have been little son
struck.
General and Mrs. Grant are visiting in
New England.
Nine de Remmsat the grand daughter OF
La Fayette, died lately i'll Paris.
Charles OConnor, the distinguished
lawyer, lives in his large mansion III Nam
tucket, solitary and alone.
The name of Epenetus Howe Green.
back candidate for the New ior k Governor
ship, got away with the imaginative tcle-
graph operators. When it reached st.
Paul it was spelled "E Pontius Horse.
They claim now that old Simon Cameron
was always free trader of votes.
Etiquette in Germany forbids the carry
ing OF parcels, no matter how small, by
gentleman. Many married men wish they
lived in Germany.
At lawn party lately where the recent
rains made it more comfortable in the
veranda than on the damp garden walks,
gentleman charged an original remark that
bad been gotten off about fourteen times,
by saying TO a young lady: Come into
the garden mud
A girl who wears handsome hose never
gets out of a hammock without tumble.
Aesthetics is thus we'll defined: The study
of that which Is beautiful, the cultivation
of that which is true, and the practice Of
that which is good.
A patriotic young man in a military
parade last week tried to bow to three gins
at the same time and broke his neck.
Universal satisfaction is caused by the
fact that Mr.. Tug Wilson has returned to
England to bring back to this country his
large and interesting family, in order that
his children may receive the benefits OF
our superior educational facilities. 1t was
feared at first that Mr.. Wilson was going
for good, but he insures his myriad OF
friends that he will return in time to fight
Mr. Elliott, of New York, for s., 500, near
New Orleans in November.
Mr.. II. W. Grady, is II. W. g., the
talented writer in the Atlanta Constitution,
whose letters from the seashOre have been
widely copied lately. -
A Niagara Falls hackman has retired on
fortune of $3.50, 900, after two years attention
to business
An Irishman saw the ladies at Cape May
taking the poodles in surf bathing with
them, and said they ought TO lave the dogs
ashore.
A visitor in Leadvile, Col, says that in
one of the churches there is notice:
please do not shoot at the organist; he Is
doing his best"
man might give world Of bliss,
And all his earthly h ,pes in this,
To waste his life in Que long kiss
Upon those perfect lips
The following clever piece of society
poetry that appeared lately in the Cincin-
natl Commercial, was written by young
gentleman who has many friends in this
city, and who has lately been here on q
visit. The initials will dicoyer him to his
friends:
THE TETE-A-TETE,
Font you think the parlors dcliciouse
This waltz Is perfectly grand,
The Fates were truly propitious
To give us 20 charming hand.
Do you know had almost decided
Not TO creep from my coy old lsir,
Could know that I'd been provided
With atreasure-much more than my share7
All, the music has stopped, shall we wander
And examine the people and things?
We've no precious lifetime TO squander
On the debufdnte who obligingly sings.
Here's an alcove that couldn't be better
For a retiring nature like mine,
These cushions are right TO the letter,
The flowers and GOODNESS divine.
SO you've Just returned from your touring
At Paris, believe, in the fall;
The socials here can't be allu ring,
But better than nothing at all.
] thought would never recover
From the wound you made In my heart,
] presume you've had many a lover,
But I've loved only for you my part,
How often your eyes set me burning
With the maddenipg power OF love,
Now I'm slowly and bitterly learning
Woman hasn't the heart Of a dove.