davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
THE AMERICAN ACIDLuY or MEDICINE.

PHILADELPHIA, Oct 27.-At tO-day's session
o. the American Academy oil Ne c- tIc iOuoHn- UIi
crr- elected 10 srrye during the cnsdng yea E;
President, Henry o. Marcy Nj d., Ma>-achu-r tts vice
lcn1 Drs GcO e i. Beard. OF New-lO X; William
Elmer rIGgotou, y. j.; Cornelius Il A,uew, Of N-W-
York an TuOlls Dry Stale OF Pnildel Jhla; secre-
tary ad treasurer, K cA I'd j. DUaghspu ". De- o, Phil
aIcqnia ana assistant secretary, Charles Mcintyre,
II d. q EastOn, Pa.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
WHAT Is GOING on TODAY.

Last day Of rcgistrat on IN Ncw-iork.
prawrunaIa Yacht CLUBS fall regatta.
Walking match at Madison square G rden.
Lacrosse tournament ut Polo G1ouHds.
Trot,ing match At Gcducmen's Diving Park'
Republican mass-mcctiDg q, LJ lie Hall.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

received few friends yesterday. drove out twice
and sat for photographs at sarcnyM saT"ny n9s
also made arrangements 10 'ahe m ahe wi,i begin
photographs and il is expected that she WIN ''eN
her eittlnps tomorrow.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

TIE PRETENrIoNs WHICH sHoDDY CLOTHING
HOUSES MAKE TO APPEAR WHAT THEY ARE not
REMIND U.s. OF THE STORY OF GENTLEMAN
WHO MET A QUIET NEwSBOY SELLING PAPERS
Us THERE ANY NEWS, sONSYW INQUIRED
TIE GENTLEMAN. LOTS OF NEWS" REPLIED
THE BOY, BUT THERE'S NOTHIN WUTH HoI--
LERIN ABOUT" JUST so, AND so THEIR Gus
TONERS FIND OUT n THE END BUT WHEN WE
"HOILER" YOU MAY BE SURE THERE'S CLOTH
ING NEWS WORTH HEARING.
FOR EXAMPLE. WE OFFER TO-DAY. IN CoYNEC.
TIoN WITH OUR PERFECT STOCK OF MEMS AND
BOYS CLOTHING OF EVERY DESCRIPTION, THE
FOLLOWING BARGAINS IN
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
A new COOKING SCHOOL.

on Monday next Institution 20 be known as =, "a
PARLOAS' :, .nOOL OF COOKERY. will be opened a. ~
2Z2 asst I7th.st betwe I'd and sd and near s S
vesant square York Instruction IN al lines o xsa
cry wiz knowledge IL ordinarily desi ed WIN " shss
by competent and Experienced tea hers There VIZ 1.
deuosrauon cS each week and opportunities ~. .,s
waite acuce by Of six laes. for whose ssnS
special provision has been made the cass iO1ns az
b ght and conod Gus and IN ushed throughout III o.
enhAnce ne pleasure 81 the all of whiehs DdTI
b, tie upts The giving class dinner al me - ~
lessons evidence Of the degte' ol sr In
tai ,e,i will eucOuiaged Crcu,a c0ntalnh~ u'saxsn
formation wifi De furnished request For terms iof P'
lessons apply at the 3 hoo. -, ,,,oxns
the ectuies n 81 week the preparation on ne M
named dishes vii. he eycmpiued N NuAlf ny ptgs ~
Cream teery SOUP Chicken, Ia raraie
Blankets thaTotte Russo Royal lhplotna 70 ssonsa
TUESDAY. AT -. NJ ream % llce soup iSser v1tn
with bread sauce Banquette OF Chicken eau LOVE- W.
CTea Sauce Pincayp.e Shorbet Admission 80 cows
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

MINIATURE ALHANAC-rO.OAT.
sunrs,s G2C Sol Moon Kiss G3 Moons age DAYS Is
gI,t NAIrE Ti-DAN.
Vsaniy Hook S42 GOV. Gsliu1 92O. Hell Gate. 400
PaSInly H0O6 9OS uOv lsiand 943. Hell Gate, ll:33
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
DR.. RAILWAYS REGULATING PILLS,

Perfectly taseless yalty cOltei for tho q M t
orders Of the stomach liver. bowels kidneys, Oaiies
m Ia its 80 Ions forms netv)t. diseases heaiaeh9
bilious fever inflammation OF t13 bowels ~ 90. and AZ
arrangements OF the internal viscerL PiicE - CENas
PER BOZ 500 D Az 1E1SSss@
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
EXPENSES OF CITY DEPARTMENTS

EXPENSES OE
The Board of Estimate and Apportlonment heaId
arguments Yesterday from representatives or the
Street Cleaning Department, the Police boaru ann
the Board of Education IN regard 10 the ,n,ant
for next year The Sreet-Cleanng Depar'ihcn.
asks for ST I3S. C1J an increase Of $13o,olo over
the amount allowed last year. COMMISSIONS
Coleman explained that more oos+ money cf
labor had increased The Police Board wants
So. 6Sl ,O7O, an increase of 10000; Inc extra
money viii be used to build new police Station Eau on
timate presented by the Board of Education was loT
So. COO. 800 Last year the Board was allowed
SO 500. 600. Controller Campbell took occasion 70
reply 10 some statements that had Deeh puoiii.u'
declaring that he was opposed to the edncatioh VI
po0r children Ills remarks were as follows
My great desire ia to give the children of the poor
about fOuI-hfths OF the population OF this clly
education according to the school laws Oh tS ~ the
great deal has been said about my 0ppVelup,. and
say that the Touching Of mus and draMlng cn ~
the grammar schools an UNNECESSARY eh every
child collegiate education. have simply reerreu %
the table OF comparative STATISTICS S.N4 dr to learn
educating children in different cities, III Oiuer " o.
why N rs that the expense for each chd IS t"ioo no
much IN this CITY as III BfOohlyn - =,
Commissioner Coudert said that In the Nineteenth
Ward ii 900 children unable TO get an euuGd-
tion pecaus4 there was no room for them. lie also
stated tina, in some Instances poilcal llnucnue 9
necessary IN order to get cnlld lnto SoAlo VI
the oyercrOWdcd SCHOOLS.
THE NEWARK EX-CONIROLLER INDICTED
The Grand Jury of Essex County, n -, went lnto
court Yesterday with number OF indictments
Among them was an indictment OF Daniel W. BAKER
ex. Controller of the City OF Newark. The spechc
charge against Mr.. Baker is understood to be IAN
ure to pay over at the proper time 10 the treasurer
certain amounts which came into his hands as
Controller and which were subsequently stolen Dy
his clerks. In 1873 the NcW-JeIsey Legislature
passed an act eStaol ,Shing the ONCE OF Controller
In the CITY of Newark Daniel w. haker Decan,
the first incumbent Oh the o e. and he held IL uhll
last winter, when, soon after the exposure Oh
Ia mr.
resign IL was shown III the Investigation ina, 'he
Controllers Office had been conducted III loose
and careless manner, and that most Of the frauds
were due 10 ms negligence. he Grand Jury OI tue
last December term OF the cOur ) agreed upon an
indictment O. both Controller Baker aud Treasurer
WmanS This action of the jury was suddenly re-
veIsrd. however. 10y quorum OF ITS members JISI
prryou. TO gong into court 10 be discharged. me
Grand jury OF tie April term indicted IrcasutT
mans Ter forgery, and he pleaded non NuIt ana
basuol vet received the sentence Oh the court ~
was expected inao tho present Grand jury Would
lndct one other City Hall Official, but ii Nas an
nouDced Yesterday that tins was not done. Baker
VIII probably plead to-day.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

II is nrobable that the yOung l1dv celebrated
charming lines Of Robert Bum, had tan noh spo
with other beauty Dem shes. For sucI coHl
mons Dr 3cnsons should be- on every lady toe
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
TIE ELGTN

SAFrs.-Thc only Steel Fiance, Round Corner,
Fire Proof safe made. EMORY. ~ Vcsey-sa
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

Henry 4. DANIELS, VI. d..
IA LexiugtOn-nve. between 2)th ald 3Oth-St5
Hours to . 5i1T Impotence -teruy, diseases OF the
Gopit0. ruary or nervous stem. speclh ties
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
MRS. LAYGTRY AND MME. MISS

Mrs Laugtry j. settling down to aroutine of work,
oleasuIe aud sightseeing Yesterday morning she
Iesumed rcheafsals Of " The tneIua Maich at
the Park Theatre. lunched at Two aud alterwaId
drove ont TO the larK In TIE evening. she attended
the performance OF The Tar 'enu at W ailach =
Theatre she was very much delighted with the
beautiful interior of the LOuse. The comedy she
had seen IN London. She Viii attend the matinee
VI the Grand Opera House tins alter noon c,
Nine Nilsson spends her time very quietly. She
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

TIE ELGIN
OvrRcoAr shoud hy all admirers OF hanfome ana
ucrcct hfting garments LOyOON Il bYfPOoL 90 NM
CO. Broadw az cor Grandst. BOwery, cor HesteIsI
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
MEMS TROU sERS

FOR FOUR DOLLARS.
FORMER PRICE
Lot sO25-56 pairs Of oxford mixed cassi-
mere. with black worsted
stu OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. s. 90
Lot 7,s94-57 pairs Of brown mixed Cass
mere. with double stripe Of
lighter brown. 81. ........... So 80
Lot Q 1864 pairs OF dark fancy cassL
showing stripes of red
threads. g. so
lot :. G69-5l pairs Of stylish. brown che
yiot with black and red
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.. s. so
TIL, FIRST THREE ABOVE LOTS ARE CONNER
CIALLY SPEAKING" ALLwOoL. THAT MEANS.
TRUTHFULLY SPEAKING. PART COTTON. BUT
THE FABRIC Is THE STRONGER FOR THE LITTLE
COTTON TWISTED INTO THE wOOLLEN THREADS.
THE FOURTH LOT II REALLY "ALLWo0L" AL.
THOUGH ROUGHER GOODS. IN OTHER STORES
THE Statesmen WOULD TELL YOU THAT ALL
FoUE WERE EQUALLY FREE FROM COTTON.
FOR FIVE DOLLARS
Lot 7C7s-7j pairs dark oxford mixed Cashmere with
treble worstcd stripe formerly So 80
Lot G2l-7O pairs stylish blue and brown stuped ssh
mere; formerly 81.
YOU WOULD KNOW THESE WERE "ALL.WOOL II
IF YOU FELT OF THEM WITH YOUR EYES SHUT
WE WARRANT THEM AS SUCH THEY ARE AMONG
OUR vEaY BEST GooDs-FINE ENOUGH FOR ANY
GENTLEMAN.
TO THE BOYS.
FOR PUZZLE NEWS SEE TOMORROws PAPERS
BUT FOR CLOTHES. UNDERCLoTHE5, HATS AMI
SHOES. COME AND SEE Us TODAY. OUR STORE Is
OPEN UNTIL 10 O'CLOCK TONIGHT. AND II YOUR
PARENTS HAVE NEVER DEALT HERE SHOW
THEM THE WAY.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
AnnOnnnemenra

A sure cure for rheumatism, nervousness ana
pains in the head BAG kdneysParkers Ginger Tonic
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

For thick heads. heavy stOmaChs, billOusne'
Wells Siay Apple pills. athdrtc. 10 and L3c.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

Elastic stockings, for varicOSe veins, weak
and swollen Dnts &c P0nerOY Truss tonpany 10 90
Broadway The surgical appliances VI every KIND
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

ARRESTED on Insufficient EVIDENCE.
LOUIS Fischer was committed a few days ago by
Ponce Justice smith on the charge Of having COM
united LARCENY. Yesterday he was taken before
Jp.lice Barrett in the supreme COurt, Chambers
Oh a VIII of naboas corpus. Justice Barrett ordered
his reieasc on the ground mat The evidence on
Fischer ana "j0e" DAVIS were aTdIgned before
JUS Ice SIiIili charged WIN having stolen Watcn
AZ. OtncI tC4co nom SIT Faulkner IS no ana not
appcar against inc pTsOnCT EIscncr ttbtIneU tudJ
De- GIVE NciuGeIg had employed INN 20 va On
DAVIS. vino was man of BAD character. lie hau
accordingly fgiO"e Davis, au0 saw nun commit
tue tnett lie reported 40 detective Weinberg, who,
having something else to 40, got DETECTIVES kuah
ana ~ ard % make the arrest. these detectives dld
uOt bcueIe IIscuers story, and arrested hun we'll
es DaSI,. Inc Justice discharged DAVIS and COM
uilttc,. Fischer.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

CRUISE g. FITS FREEEs. BORDEAUX,
call special attention the iact that all wines bottled ny
them have thc pate wire ting ouud each Dote"hch
cannot removed without being destroyed II
Che consumer the goDuuele55Ot lc VINE the bO'"0dUA
bOtting. anu Is preventive against limitations.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28

RROOKLYN LADIES
VIII enjoy reading the household column In The Brooklyn
Times Tonight. Eight pages. Price cents
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
DROPPING DEAD ON The WAY TO JAIL.

For GODS sake let me SIT down !" cried man
of middle age, whom Officer Francis Becker WAS
lcaCmg IN halIliOn-st., Paterson, yesterday morn
Ing. A nome at Iaer he prisoner sank NleesS on
the sid, walk. Assistant CITY Physician Hurd
summoned, and lie pronounced the man dead. lie
Jam ; Proud OOt, native OF Scotland who
had been pulled out OF the IaceWay just Time TO
save him IrOn drowning the evening before by a
German, Samuel Murray, and Assemblyman T. II.
Shields. They had seen PTOudioot, after beng
put OUT OF liquor shop neipessiy drunk. staggcr
IL o tie IaccM"y, ana haO rescued hun nad
hIm sent 10 the pOlCe station. IN the morning
he, rdcr GlcaNeS ma &c out "A commitment, sending
him 10 jail 4Or twenty days, ana the Policeman was
taxing aim thIthcT when ne fell dead Proudfoot
was once steauy mechanic, but after the death of
ms vile he urgan career OF GIsSIi aJlOn. lie rs
sand 20 have had relatives III good standing III Scot
land. Coroner NewcOmbe took charge OI the case,
but decided not TO hOid an inquest judging tnat the
man dled IRON alcoholism
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1882-10-28
BROOKLYN.


It's expected that General Fitzhuyh Lee will re-
view the 18Th Regiment III Christmas week.
John Eagdn, age sixty, with no hy.nr except the
police stAuon which ne trcquented, was found dead
in II cellar Fust-st yesterday. lie reported TO
have wealthy relatives.
A NEE ing Of the representatives. OF the several
labor organizations was h-ld last evening at
GranaGa II Ill, III Alyrte-ave, and steps Were taken
to form Il Central Labor Union Tor kIugs County
The new penal code was severely denounced ia the
remarks OF some OF the speakers.
The old Bridge Street Ferry to be re0pcned be-
fore May !, 1858. Controller Scmer and Mayor
Low nave granted "A lease 10 the Interested Drop
erty-OWueis IOT The slip at the foot OF Bndgesi az
50 year for the ffst i've years. and the privilege of
a renewal al 1000 thereafter.
a sut TO recover $4,000 as damages for the So
ductIOn OF his vie mas Oe n brought by lonis
Miller. a lIquOI-uealrT. of No. ,03J Myrtc-aye
against his oTner partner, Henry Baru, H. now pro-
pnetOr OF a hotc AT Richmond, ). l. Miller Ia, se-
cured "A divorce from his wlic.
Meat Inspector HOLIDAY has discovered butchers in
saugnter-nouses in Alnth-st. ~ the act 81 breeding
DuuocKs several DAYS before tney were TO be
slaughtered. Ia order Ia make he meat wnite Tao
Practice IL 20 open suaIl artery the tail and
frequently Inflammation set, 10. The society f,r
PieVcn ION OF Cruelty 10 Animals viii investigate
tue matter
In P.ymouth Lecture-r0om last evening. Mr..
Beccher sud that MS WIDE and long experience
showed nan thaU one great trouble IN Cuflsttau
churches VAS that ministers nad little RELIGION.
/ hey compared favOrably VITA all other educated
men, ana III the mdlu Wef" SIMPLE I'm hui and
meant right Bat they dId not carry tIe inward
Kingdom and spirit OF christ Mr. Beccuer Ido, thgt
he ouk his share OF blame III regard 10 TINS. lie was
10 better ;ban lotncrs, aud IN many les ,cc.s was
not good.
The dead body of a male infant, about a week
Old. was iound on " Wednesday buried in The yarI OF
No. II tIIst-bt l.. D., NAcTe Joan Cassidy las "A
IIIruress g-snup, and over which nye on Blk fam
ines i've. After listening mass of conflicting
testimony a cUrOncrs jury brought III the following
luc,d and satisfactory verdict: We, the Iury
ind thai the Aforesaid ana unknown n!aAt of un-
known age came 10 lis death through unknown
means upon unEUOWn Gute"
The funeral services over the remains of the late
Major Archibald g. A. Constable were hcld ,e,ie,-
day Afternoon at St Luke's Episcopal Church IN
CnntOn-aYc The Rev. George Il. Van he Wut.r
OF 81 LuAc's Church, ana uie Roy. DR.. nOmcr oil
st James, Church, were the officiating cicrg, men.
The choir Oi Innity hurch of tuis ca" sang. 20
pall-bcaers we're john W. Harper, fletcher liar er,
q. W. Carleton, James Harper, ;. >. Cunant, and
NJ. W. NOrus. Forty of AaJOr COnataDic's a5s0-
cates III the tiarper Publishing House attended The
funeral n q BODY. The inGerment in Greenwood
Cemetery was private.
JERSEY CITY.
The water willlbe shut oil to-day from a. m to
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-05-03
A Story Of borrowers

There lived near my fathers family,
in a quiet liltle village IN Ohio, two
families who we're chrome borrowers,
and the pests of the nelghborhooi. One
borrowed by day the other by ght,
The former would take anything, from
pinch Of soda 10 bedqullt, but made
a specially OF flour. The other family
made no requests, but wood, coal, joint
OF stovc-pipe, and garden implements
disappeared in rapid succession. The
day borrower became a steady drain on
the -four barrel. My mother, beiug Of
sympathetic nature, could not refuse,
and would doubtless yet have been
supplying the same family with -four II
she had not had one bad girl among her
family OF Children, who was at home
alone one day y hen the I'D who always
came iul the -four entered, and in his
usual words said, Nam wants couple
spooniuls of -four to make batch bread.
This same bad girl measured exactly
two spoonfus -four into his immense
wooden bowl The -four looked right
lonely, but it didn't feel as louely as
.eal bad girl did. when the mother oi
the lad came in and threatened to ska
her. She changed her -four market, but
the total de2rayily Of that girl was cleaI
ly established.
During tie night two peach trees
we're entirely stripped Of beautiful ripe
fruit. Early next morning cur uisht
borrower called. My mother told OF
our loss, and, Of courae, had not the
faintest suspicion as 10 who had taken
them; and her neighbor expressed sym
palby and disgust that any body would
do such thing, when the same pad
g.rl had to have her say, and remarked
That it didn't matter much, as most OF
the reaches were plugged, aud that
whoever swallowed them wouldn't have
a chance TO digest them as they were
llleG with epicac-all of which was
strictly ialse-and that bap girles moth
er was horrlGed at such taIsehood.
Two hours later, as some one was pass
ing through the alley in the rear OF the
borrowers house. lie discovered about
bushel Of cooked peaches. II was alter
ward learnel that the family spent ma
ny hours in the night peellng aud can
ming peaches, and as many hours near
l. getting them out Of the cans. 80
owing to that bad girl, peaches, sugal
and LABOR were an entire loss but w
" ere eyer after rid OF oar night as wei
As our day borrowers. So much 10
having ore bad gil iu the family.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-05-03

YOU p she said. You'd better not
take DR.. Ashton until after thar
Several years later, when the me-
dallion had led to more than the find
ing of stores CT plunder in Ihe old ruins
Which a gang of thieves had taken care
to make appear haunted, Homer Ash
ION, physician Of high standing, was
living in large American city, A
schoolnate whom be had not met for
years SAID 10 him one day at dinner as
they were talking of marriages and
deaths among their former comrades:
BY the way, Ashton, you meyer told
me where you first met Your wife. [
only know that il was in England.'
Homer laughed.
L first met her. be said, behind
Minerva's shield. Did l not, Violet?
-four Continent.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-05-03
A MOrtage OH the Farm.

Good lalmer friends, whatever slse
you do there Is one thing you want to
avoid as you would pestlence. Never
put Il IN, rtagage on our farm.
No matter how hard pressed you are
never be tempted to dc it. If you do,
you will regret it to the latest day OF
your life.
No matter if you DO waat 20 fix up the
house, or buy more land, Or get be
ter team, or send the boys to college,
or buy the girles piano-dont morta-
age the farm 20 DO ii.
1t will hang like an lncum5us over
,eu. 1t VII bind you to the wheel. II
will make a slave ol o., until the hol'
der OF the mortgage steps in and lOr-
closes, and sells your homestead 1or
half of what it is worth, aud euds The
matter.
Macy circumstances may arse whlch
place you in a tight place. You may
need money in cases OF sickness: your
need may be imperative, and mortsag-
ing tue iarm may appear ieasiolc-out
dou't do it! II you must have the
money, sell tie farm yourself and be-
Gin onew. 1t will be better in The long
run, for then you will We working for
Yourself. aud not to pay interest, which
brings you no nearer paving the orlgI-
nal debt.
Our sympathies always go one to-
wards the farmer who has a mortgage
on his farm. We have watched the
thing over and over, and just know how
il works. He has not dollar he can
call his own. The man who holds that
mortgage wants every dollar he can
crab. He hovcrs round, ready 10 pounce
on the cash whsn it comes in from the
pet colt, the young calf, the ne" chick
ems the children have raised, the ont-
ter tho thrifty hcu-ewiie has managed
to spare.
The farmer who has bis house mort
caged canuot iOjulse in luxuries. III
ne gets a new coat it is remarked upon
| If his wife INDUCES in a new dress,
somebody says they had bstIer be pay
linz up the mortgage. II his son drives
a smart horse, the old gossips nod then
heads at each other aud talk about
'puuirg on stlls, and bis fathers farm
morigaged !
VINO can feel an interest IN piece oil
property whicn ia bi' only in name
Who cares about making farm more
valuable, thG. some man be owes may
profit by ilg Tue fact OF IL j., nDne OF us
ha, G approached near enough to por'ec-
ton ln feel any great anxiety TO sperd
our lives lolIng TO Zurich So,'sbodY
out of the f,mily.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-05-03

RECKON YoU'sE Boz DRUNK
Two young men went 10 see The Misses
Jones, two estimable young ladies. A
colored girl came 10 the door, and the
following conversation took place
Are the Misses Jones ln?'
Yes, Mrs. Jones am in. Does you
va TO see hers'
No, we want to see Misses JONES'
Mrs. Junes-dat's what said
We want 10 see the Misses Jones
can't you understands p
Course | kin. De Mrs. Jones am de
old lady. Daps the only Missus in die
heah house.
.Confound it, We want 10 see the old
lady's daughters y
oh, de Misses Joueses!. Why dldu'l
you say so? l reckon you'se bol
drunk.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-05-03
L WONDER WHY.

wonder why it is that some
Through all their days and nights and
years.
Gather the sunshine of this life,
And Others are only clouds are tears
wonder why it is that some
Dance, laugh and jest, while others
weepl
That some no wakeful hours see
While some know not what It's to sleep
wonder Why it is that balm
Into some lives is always poured
Z While Others know not what 1t is
To hear sympathetic word!
think not jeer or muImer at
This mixture of life's blssfuiwoe,
Think not grumble or rePne,
only wonder that it's So
For many a heart when touched by grei
Would bask in sunshine like its mate,
And could appreciate change
Although its coming might be late
And many lips would taste life's wine'
And harvest of each coming year,
And many heart rejoice to find
Rare, ripened corn within the ear.
But long as life goes on there'll be
For some, rich bliss, for others, woe;
And though l murmur not or sigh'
wonder that it must be So.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1882-05-03

GETTING Personal. Last week
District Attorney Sherman was cross
examining a young man indicted for
burglary, III the Superior Court. The
prisoner testified that he had gone BY
various names in different localities,
when the affable Colonel asked:
Did you 60 by any other manner
Yes was the answer.
We'll, lets hear it."
oh, went by the name OF Sherman
once
You did, did you: How long did you
go by that nameS'
We'll, I'll tell you,' was the answer,
given amid the subdued laughter OF The
audience, L felt kind ofashamed OF 1t
and dropped it soon.'
The laugh was turned against the
willy District Attorney, but be sppear'
ed to enjoy it as much as any one in the
cour. room.