Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1882-01-05


Guiding my own, and so my GRAND is
accomplished. at least so far as any ex-
ertions of mine can aid that accom-
plishment. This is a rather cumber-
some way to fence and fortify ones
property against the literary buccaneer,
it is true; still, if it is effective il is a
great advance upon past conditions, and
one to be correspondingly welcomed.
1t makes one hope and believe that a
day will come when in the eye of the
law literary property will be as sacred
as whisky [laughterl, or any other of the
necessaries of life. Renewed laughter
In this age of ours if you steal another
mans label to advertise your own brand
of whisky with you will be heavily fined
and otherwise punished for violating
that trademark. Hear, hear. If You
steal the whisky without the trademark
you go to Jail. Laughter. But if you
could prove that the whisky was litera-
ture You could steal them both, and the
law wouldn't say a word. Applause
and laughter. 1t grieves me to think
how far more profound and reverent
respect the law would have for litera-
ture if body could only get drunk on
it. Still. the world moves. The inter-
ests of literature upon our Continent
are improving. Let us be content and
wait We have with us here a fellow
craftsman born on our own side Of the
Atlantic. who has created an epoch in
this Continents literary history-an atl-
thor who has earned, and worthily
earned. and received the vast distinc-
ton of being crowned by the Academy
of France. Loud cheers This is
honor and achievement enough for the
cause and the craft for one decade.
Assuredly, if one may have the privi-
lege of throwing in a personal impress
sion or two, / may remark that my stay
in Montreal and Quebec has been ex-
ceedingly pleasant, but the weather has
been a good deal of disappointment.
Canada has reputation for magnificent
winter weather, and has prophet who
is bound by every sentiment of honor
and duty to furnish it, but the result
this time has been mess Of character
less guesses of which all right feeling
Canadians are probably ashamed. Still,
only the country is to blame. Nobody
has right TO blame the prophet, for
this WASH t the kind of weather he prom
ised Laughter and cheers. Well.
never mind. What You lack in weather
you make up in the means Of grace.
This is the first time was ever in a city
where YOU couldn't throw brick with
out breaking a church window; yet l
was told you were going to build one. l
said: 1.-The scheme is good, but where
are YOU going to find the room?" They
said: I'VE will build it on top of an
other church and use an elevator. J"
Laughter. This shows that the gift
Of lying is not dead in the land.
suppose one must come in the sum-
mer to get the advantage Of the Cana
dian scenery. A cabman drove me two
miles up perpendicular hill in sleigh
and showed me an admirable snow
storm from the heights Of Quebec. The
man was an ass. | could have seen the
snow-storm as well from the hotel win
dow and saved my money. Still, may
have been the ass myself. There is no
telling. The thing is all mixed up in
nv mind. but anyway there was an ass
in the party. and | do suppose that
wherever a mercenary cabman and a
gifted literary character are gathered
together for business there is bound to
be an ass in the combination some
where. 1t has always been so in my
experience, and / have usually been
elected, too. But it is no matter. l
had rather be an ass than a cabman any
time. except in summer. Then. with
my advantages. could be both. saw
the Plains of Abraham and the spot
where the lamented Wolfe stood when
he made the memorable remark that he
would rather be the author Of Gray S
Elegv than take Quebec. But why did