The semi-weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1882-1886, 1882-04-26
wons AND WuGD1A1L9

W00D AND WANOSAo
or q Commercial Traveller from
Chicago.
C,,ar,ea Dickens has described the i'd
ventures Of an "uncommercta Trsvei'
err" and it h to be doubted II any len
graphic pen can do justice to the wan
derings Of the Chicago commercial tour.
ist of the day. One Of the most a"ept
of these genial n0mads has recently
landed in Butte, after . three weeks
tour Of the Territory, in which he visit
ed the principal points Of commerce.!
interest. He unfolds . tale which would
make the hair Of = Chicago reporter
stand up like quilts upon the fretful
porcupig, or words to that effect.
striking the Territory about April LIST
this enterprising representative Of the
genus drummer made ut once for Butte,
and alter changing hotels three times,
hung up at the one. which first inveigled
him into its fell clutches. Using his
own language, he swapped:lies with the
merchants OF the Silver City for about
two weeks, during which time he ab-
sorbed much DIT whisky, 70 called on
account Of ito biting powers, and sold
many goods. Thence with heavy heart
and light pocketboot our traveller struck
out for Missoula, the Garden City, aud
made vain effort to ride in Gilmer &
6slisbury's palace coaches, which were,
however, ton full to admit OF even only
one more. The Necessities of the case
consequently compelled his going via
Philipsburg, and thereby hangs tale.
The first night out the cayuse outfit
broke down, and the exxsperated pas
sengers had to camp out on Georgetown
Flats. Among them was newly-mar-
ried couple, come to seek their fortune
in the wilde Of Montana. Whether
they will realize ON the fortune Is q
question, but there can be no doubt that
they found the wilds that night, and
with . vengeance, too. We will call
call our travsler o. Malley for short and
will here pay a compliment to his gal
lantry BY saying that when the bride
tainted from fright the gallant O'Malley
pulled his pocket pistol, supported her
with one ann and with the other emp
tied the gurgling flask through her ruby
lips which chung and chung In most
enhancing fashion. The horrors Of
that bridal bed, in . four-foot snow
drift, can better be imagined than de-
scribed. The TASKS were dry long be
fore morning, and when day broke the
mail bags, the express, the baggage and
the bridal pair were piled into sleigh
and hauled two miles before breakfast
by the suffering passengers.
Philipsburg. where the next day was
spent, impressed the traveller unfavora-
bly,. He got the impression that ito
mines were ''petered out" and 20 he
left in short order himself.
The following day after that tribula-
ton which worksth hone, and that hope
which worketh experience, the caravan
reached New Chicago. Here again were
encountered the lnagnilic4 mt accommo-
dations Of the Gilmer 4 Salisbury line,
which sleighs it's thousands yearly. Into
the cayuse cutter the whole caboodle Of
passengers were cramIned. and away
went the foaming steeds at the rate Of
four hours mile to Tent creek, where
the wheel horses in the excitement of
the moment got to going at the rate Of
three hours to the mile, and so walked
all over the leaders, which were only
crawling. Then came an instance of
generosity unparalleled in the history
Of stage lines. The extire cargo Of the
sleigh was rendered free bath in the
middle Of the stream, the sleigh Itself
floating gaily away. Just at this point
in the Pilgrims Progress, the thirteenth
and last wife ola Latter Day Saint who
had just returned fron a proselyting
tour in England, broke forth with such
torrent of North country oaths that
she took all the starch out of our COM
mercial traveller, the happy husband
being all the time deaf and consequent
~ unconscious. After emerging the
next twelve miles were passed over in
twenty-four hours, the vehicle tipping
over four times. The gallant traveller,
with nothing dry about him but his
flask, waded most of the time in the
mud and water along the reetly nlarge
of the alleged road, carrying on his
broad Lack alternately the mail, the ex-
press, the blushing bride and the Sara
tOga trunk.