St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1882-06-02
That Terrible Infant.

Little Freddie was having his hair
cOmbed by his mother, and he grum-
bled at the operation. "Why, Fred
die, you ought not to make such fuss.
| don't when my hair is cOmbed."
Eyes, but your hair amt hitched to
your head"
"When | grow up, I'll he man,
won't | p asked little Austin boy of
his mother. ''Ges, my son but if you
want to he IA man you must be indus
trious at school and learn how to be-
have yourself" "Why, mamma, do
the lazy boys turn out to he women
when they grow up ?"
A little girl of seven exhibited much
disquiet at hearing of new exploring
expedition. When she was asked why
she should care about it, she said
"lf they discover any countries, that
will add to the geography | have to
study. There are countries enough in
it now"
edward, what do hear? that you
have disObeyed your grandmother,
who told you just now not to jump
down these steps ?" "Grandma didn't
tell us not to, papa she only came
to the door and said: q wouldn't
jump down those steps, boys : and
shouldn't think she would-an old
lady like her ~
1t was IA Brockton school. "What
is the feminine of tailor ?" asked Il
teacher of class in grammar. "Dress-
maker" was the prompt reply of
bright-eyed little boy.
A very little boy had one day done
wrong, and was sent, after paternal
correction, to ask in secret the forgive
ness of his heavenly Father. His Of
fense was passion. Anxious to hear
what he would say, his mother fol-
lowed to the door of his room. In
lisping accents she heard him ask to
be made better; never to be angry
again and then, with child-like sim
plicity, he added: "LOrd, make mas
temper better too"
Master Tommy Che had been very
naughty, and was now amusing him
self with his scripture prints, "Here's
Daniel in the lions den !" Mamma
(incautiOusly), "Ahl What was he
east in the lions den for ?" Master
Tommy with triumph), "Cause he
was good"
A bevy of little children were telling
their father what they got at school.
The eldest, Reading, spelling and
definitions" "And what do you get,
my little one ~ said the father to Il
rosy checked little fellow, who was at
that time slyly driving a tenpenny nail
into the door panel. "Me? Oh, gets
readin', spellin' and spankin's."
Tootsy, on making the horrible dis
covery that her kitten had whiskers ::
''Ma, | don't want dis tat Dis is "A
man tat ? ! want a dirl tat | want a
dirl tat !"
The religious education of the young
is terribly neglected in this country.
''Are you "A Methodist p "No, sir"
"a Presbyterian ?' "No, sir "Well
what are you" "Why, sir, if any
thing, am just little Episcopalian
on the mothers side"
One downtown preacher is blest
with two sOns-bright little fellows
| they are, too. Now, it is the custom
in that preachers family for those two
lads to recite every morning verse of
Scripture. The boys were in great
haste to get out on the hill couple of
mornings ago, when the father said :
''Now boys, recite your verses then
YOU can 60" "I' rather be door
keeper in the house of the Lord than
dwell in the tents of the wicked" re-
peated the older lad. "Sod l." ejacu-
lated the junior youth, and away he
flew, aud the father did not remon-
strate.