davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12
The Wrong Woman.

"Howdy, Skidmore? What makes you
look SO ALFRED blue, old MANI"
You'd look blue, guess, Dufy-be-
cause your a married man, too. just
imagine, will you? was in Shreve's
this morning looking at an expensive
pair of bracelets. just as paid the
money, my wife, who had stepped in,
and was looking over my shoulder all the
time, threw her arms around my neck
and thanked me-"
"Great Scott!"
81 never felt SO broke up and disgust
ed in my life. OF course there was no
help for il, however, and the worst of it
was that had TO rush round 20 the dry
goods store and have her real present--a
pair OF one-button kids--sent to the
hired girl or the whole business would
have been given away"
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12
The Cannibals' Idea OF Enemies.
Now tell us all about the war.
And What thav XIII aaoh nfhar for


And what they kill each other for"
Pleads little Peterkin, in Southey' poem
Of The Battle of Blenheim."
The cannibals wonder, when told of
our warfare, seems about as hard to sat
isfy, though it is not quite 50 innocent.
A missionary, in an address describing
his experience in New Guinea, gives
some specimens of the hard questions he
had to answer:
when 1 was talking to him about
cannbalism, and wishing him to give it
up, he said:
"But you know it is only our enemies;
we never eat our friends. 1t is right to
eat our enemies. Have you got no enc
mics in your country?"
l was obliged to confess that we had
people who were sometimes regarded as
enemies.
well" said he, land do you never
fight?
Again was obliged to confess that
we did.
"And do you never kill anybody" he
asked.
= L was very glad he did not ask me how
many, for L could not have told him.
There would have been no words in his
language to tell him that. But when
he found out that we did kill people he
said:
''Do you not eat them.?"
No. 1 said. we do not eat people in
our country The man looked perfectly
astonished.
Then what do you kill them for?' he
said. We kill our enemies because We
like them, but you kill them for nothing
at all. - Exchange.
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12
what Swearing Won't Do.

1t won't pick you up when you fall.
1t won't light your cigar when your
last match goes out.
1t won't mend lamp chimney when
you let it fall
1t won't change 1880 at the top Of your
letter into 1881.
1t won't make your corns stop aching
when some one steps on il.
1t won't prevent the nails in your new
boots from running into you foot.
1t won't shake off the shovelful OF
snow that has landed on you from some
roof.
1t won't make train come back for
you when you are one minute and thirty
seconds late.
1t won't ease your shins any or make
your wife stop laughing when you fall
down with Q bucket.
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12
What the Photographer Said.

Those who have been through the ex-
perience will recognize the following:
"Sit right there"
Move over little"
"a little to the left"
'Ahl that's too much"
"Hold your chin up"
''Look about there"
drop your left hand"
"Put your feet just little closer to-
gether."
"Let me brush those hairs off your
shoulder"
II must fix your head again"
Nov let me see."
drop your right shoulder trife."
"That's good. Now lower your chin"
"Now look as pleasant as you can"
"That right foot is out too much"
Look out for you chin. There-just
So"
"Now you are all right. Let me see."
"Now think Of something funny"
"Guess you'd better look at this photo
graph. Keep you eyes wide open and
wink as often as you like"
'"There! that'll do. No-your chin is
too high. Observation-Disclosures
that's it."
Now SMILE
That's it."
"Chest out"
Shoulders mp"
Drop your hand"
"Once more now-smile."
"There!'
STEADY, now"
well this is pretty fair picture, but
l guess You had better sit again. 1t
looks blurred around the eyes,"
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12

II you throw q pound OF bread to the
poor the Lord will throw pound Of
butter into your lap 10 make what you.
have left more palatAbls.
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12
Faithfully yours,
JANE BELL"

uncle's words seemed in Q fair way to
prove true. l thought only of Miss
6creven. My novel left untouched,
and my rhyming dictionary accumulated
dust slowly, but surely. Fled were my
visions Of astonishing the world with
my genius. lived only for the mail
from Boston.
As re.read the letters l received from
Miss Screven, can make some excuse
for my infatuation. They were frank
and out-spoken, and sometimes, indeed.
tinged with cynicism; but through
them there breathed . sympathy, ten
derness, that touches me even now as l
read them over. Finally, at my solicit
ton, she sent me her photograph, which
showed her to be q regular feat
ured, large.eyed woman of rather .
serious cast Of countenance indeed, but
with lurking smile in her mouth that l
could not but confess was . largo one.
She was not beauty, saw that, but she
had an earnest, interesting face, that
grew upon me every day.
Little by little / gave myself up to
thoughts of her by day and dreams OF her
by night. Her letters l awaited with
feverish impotence, and il one were de-
lAyed was in . torment. I make no ex-
cuses for my folly. dear sir or madam;
but pray do not forget that / was only
-and-twenty then, and had fed myself
plentifully with novels and poetry. And
this was my nrst Lowell Coventry Patmore
rye in one Of his poems:
~ S! s:::; :. = asss, Il Y r: .s ~ e ''
The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1882-01-12

Laughing in my sleeve, ] sent this
Ammpnicstion of, and planned that If
IN assisApt editor sent me o frieadly
reply, / would open correspondence in
ny role Of Miss Jane Bell and fool F.
b. 6creven - never man was fooled be-
fore. Judge, then. Of my dismay when
received . letter in what / knew was
8creven's writing, but not written ON
oiioe paper, and signed Frances Bstram
8creven.
"A woman, by Jovo!" exclaimed
there and then, in the postoffice, whereof
: small boy, standing near by, nearly
swallowed the postage stamp in astonish-
mont. be vas licking. thrust the letter
IN my pocket and did not read II until I
IA safsly u home. Thus the missive
nm:
sDnAR MISS BnLL.--Your piquant
lot1er prompts me to write you . reply,
not = IN assistant editor, but rs . woman
Iliko yourself. who Il toiling up the steep
(roth that leads TO Parnassus. might
Ihovo known you we're woman, and .
oonG one at that, because, although
~ = : fonch Of masculine strength in
If6ar ooseys and poems, still there l.,
10. owootnens that Il only feminine. /
|link thnt women more often have this
|yee q unsouliniky than men have any
4 NJ & ~ tondekneon vhioh q -.
slly "A purely feminine. wsss ]
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Pedagogical Slang.


Criticism had better be left unuttered
if it will do no good. And now that the
Normal Institute has closed, that
everybody is satisfied, and good results
are apparent, it might be the part of
policy as we'll as charity to forhear
criticism. And, indeed, what we shall
say does not have reference to the
essentials. With regard to those all are
agreed that the Institute was most
satisfactory success. But we labor
under the perhaps mistaken impress
ion that some Of the teachers into
whose hands this paper falls, may
profit by what follows.
Upon the occasion Of a pleasant
hours visit to the Institute on one of
Its closing days, upon entering one Of
the rooms our ears were saluted with
this expression from one Of the stu
dents: 81 think Mr.-'sa little off on
that business" Another teacher in
presenting his views made the remark
that under the circumstances he
would ''set down on him." The next
speaker, on the contrary, was in favor
Of .letting up" In quick succession
followed "too thin" "all broke up"
'lightinto him, ''come down on him"
and we should scarcely have been
surprised to hear "she's daisy"
or i!tumble to the racket" These
passed unchalenged by instructors and
fellqw-students-a great mistake, we
think. They seemed to be recognized
as an allowable and essential ingredi-
ent of the Queens English in peda-
gogical discussion. In a bar-room levee
or a political convention, such rigorous
but inelegant expressions would not
have been as much out of place, at
least not so noticeable. But that Eng
lish, pure and undefiled" should be
stabbed in the house of its friends,
that those who are to train our children
should so torture and butcher their
mother tongue, is fact that calls for
comment and criticism. Do these
teachers carry their slang into their
schoolrooms? DO they presume to
defend its use there? Don't they
know that it is often the bridge be-
tween good English and blasphemy
and obscenity? The teacher should
first of all be model of grammatical
English to his pupils, but next to that,
he should be model of clean English.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Resolutions.

We the students of the AL len county
Normal Institute, desiring to express
our feelings of gratitude and respect to
our superintendent and Instructors, do
pass the following resolutions.
RESOLVED, That our thanks are due
to Superintendent Root, for the faith:
full and intelligent supervision he has
given to this Institute, encouraging
by his presence and advipa, students
and instructors alike; also for the
uniform kindness and courtesy he
has shown us during his continuance
in office, working with unflagging
zeal and untiring energy for the past
six years, to bring US and our schools
up to higher grade Of excellence.
ResolUed, That our thanks are
due to Prof. DIN for the earnest,
efficient and progressive manner in
which the present Institute has been
conducted.
Resotucd, That the Instructors,
Professors Hamm and Young, are
worthy of our highest esteem and con-
fidence as teachers.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Moran Matters.

Mr.. H. B. Smith, our wagon maker, is sick
this week.
\ now baby at Mr.. Vandivers.
At the election to vote bonds to build school
house in Moran, there was 81 votes polled the
bonds carried by p majority.
Our clerk says there are sixty scholars in
the district and more coming; not a bad be-
ginning.
Miss Bessie Keith has retu rned from Schell
City.
Mr. Ira Mcknight has gone back to Indiana
Mr.. Geo. Adams, OF Moryantown, Indiana
is visiting his sister, Mrs Jas: Mcknight. He
has come ous to try the virtue OF Iol, mineral
water on a sore leg of long standing. He is
well pleased with Kansas, and says he did not
see such crops anywhere on the route as he finds
in Kansas. Mrs. Col. Adams the same place,
is visiting at Collets. She spent the summer at
Topeka and she is so we'll pleased with Kansas
that if she could dispose Of her property in
Indiana she would soon be citizen of the Jay
hawk State.
We hear minors of mill again. We will
not be satisfied until we hear the hum of the
mill
fJayhawker had not been SO afraid of little
rain and had come out in the afternoon he
would have reported differently in regard to
the Golden Valley pic mic. When Golden VAL
ley undertakes to do anything she does it, re-
CARELESS Of rain. Hereafter. Mr.. Jahawker,
when you hear that Golden Valley is going to
have a pic mic, you may come out foE they will
be on hand.
The band boys realized something oyer thir-
teen dollars profit at the festival
Hip Hip Hurrah for st. John! PENCIL.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11

B. b. Mann, special agent from the
Kansas Mutual Life Association, of
Hiawatha, Kan, is in the city i'm the
interests of the Association. We are
glad to say to our people that the
"Kansas Mutual is good sound In
stitution, chartered under the laws of
our own state and managed and con-
trO1led by such men as the Hon. ]. P.
Davis, Pres. and Major E. N. Morril,
Treasurer, we think a sufficient guar
artee of its faithful performance of con-
tract to its members. If you want in
surance that is safe and cheap, that
offers no snares or loop holes. Sick
benefits to its members, &C., to
its members. Try the Kansas Mu-
The return of the Clerk of our
School District elbows that Iolq has
five hundred and sixty scholars to at
tend our public schools this year.
This is gain of one hundred and
twenty-five over last year.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
SUNDAY MAGAZINE.

The number for September ahounds
with pleasant, edifying and interest
ing reading, and is, as usual, profusely
illustrated. The editor, Rev. Mr.. Tai
mage, has an admirable article entitled
"The Horse and his rider" finely illus
trated; and the Home Pulpit contains
one of his eloquent and CHARACTERISTIC
sermons, "What are our Departed
Friends Doing Now?" california
Big Trees" "The Disciples of Memo
Simon" will be read with great inter-
est. Marion Harland continues her
highly interesting serial, ga Good
Fellow" and besides the other ad-
mirable SERIAL, weighed and Want
ing" there are short stOrise, sketches.
essays, etc, by popular writer's; some
very excellent poems, several of them
beautifully Illustrated and a large,
interesting and Instructive miscellany.
There are also Editorial Comments,
Personal Notes apd Comments, The
Collection Rasket, The Drift of Relig-
ious Comment, etc, etc. The price is
only % cents a number, or 50 a year,
sent postpaid. A specimsn number
will be sent on receipt of 25 cents, ad-
dressed to FRAsK LEs4IE, Publisher,
SO, So and 81 Park Place, New York.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Republican Convention.

A delegate convention Of the Reppblica vot-
ers of Allen county viii be held in the city OF
lola, Saturday, Aug. 18th. 1889. at O'Clock p
m, for the purpose of nominating candidates
Central Committee nom each township, Rep
resentative from the 26th District. Clerk OF the
Court Probate Judge, superintendent Of Public
distraction and County Attorney, also a candi-
date for County Commissioner of the Second
Commissioner District.
The delegates from the different town.
ships are apportioned as follows: Geneva, >;
Deer Creek, 5; Usage, 5; Marmaton, 4; Elm, 4;
lola, l3; Humboldt, l3; Salem, 3; Cottage
Grove, 3; Elsmore, 6. 1t Is recommended
THAT the voters of lola and Humboldt townships
meet at their usual voting places on Tuesday
afternoon, Aug. %, at O'Clock to elect dele
gates. That the voters of Cottage Grove meet
at their usual voting precincts and elect one
delegate from the west precinct, two from cen.
ter and two from the east precinct-anu that
they meet at 7:3d O'Clock p. m, Aug. p, iSs2
That the voters of Deer Greek meet at their
usual voting precincts and elect three delegates
from the west precinct and two from the east
precinct-aad that they meet at $50 O'Clock p.
m. Aug. %. That the voters of Geneva, Mar
maton, Usage, Elm, Salem and Elsmore meet
at their usual voting place at 1880 p: m Aug.
%, ISs2, to select dele gates in accordance with
this call
1t is futher recommended that the above plan
be followed unless written or printed notices of
the time and place of .neeting OF the primary Is
published in some newspaper or posted In three
prominent places in each voting precinct by the
committeeman of each township ten days prior
Ipthe date above given, announcing change IN
the place or time of meeting.
uBy order of the Allen County Republican
Central Committee.
P r. MCCLURE, Chairman.
III. A. PERKINS, Secretary.
lola, Kansas, Aug. i, lSo2.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11

From late extracts in the Democratic
press of the State it; becomes more and
more a question whether that party
will resolve, in Any way. upon the
prohibitory law and amendment. AS
a rule and glide for them to folfow the
following plank adopted by The, nhiO
Democrats B given. In that State
they were going to do this and do that
and I'm various ways show that they
were IN favor of wiping out all such
laws. When the time comes to act,
this is what they resolved: "That the
Democratic party has even maintained,
and still steadfastly adheres to the
doctrine of the largest liberty eonsis-
tent with the public welfare, and is
opposed to legislation merely sump-
tuary." AS there is probably no man
in America who is not in favor of, "the
largest liberty consistent with the
public welfare" aud<who is not oppoS-
ed to Legislation merely sumptuafy,"
the glittering generality of the prop
sition becomes more and more absurd.
Ia fact, we have never heard of any
one proposing Legislation merely
sumptuary." Declarations against
..sumptUary laws" have been favorite
dodge of the Democracy for many
years, but the thread-bare aspect of
above resolution isabout as far as they
have the courage to go. The diction-
AIRY is too handy and the word sump-
Luary has lost its terrDrs.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Geneva GATHERINGS,

Finding that Rev. L. r. Brnai. pongreGa-
tional pastor at Paola, was t, taks q vacation
of two or three weeks, supt. Stoors persuaded
him to USE the time in evangelistic work on
this mission fed, viz, Evereit, Ne sho Falls
and Geneva. Bro. B. purposely spent several
months with Moody and Sankey In the late
San Franciseo meetings. and comes to us both
deeply in earnest and filed with gospel fervor.
Present appointments at this place are preach
ing in the stone church Thursday evening Aug
10th, at O'CLOCK p. m. Father Campbell will
assist bro. Broad in administering the sacra-
meut at the close of the Sunday service. n.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Publication Notice.
In the District Court of Kansas in and for Al
len County

George sleeper(
Matthew Mckinstry, James
Sleeper, Mary Sleeper, and
David Worst, Sheriff Of Al
len County, Kansas.
To the above named defendants, Matthew Nc
kenstry aud Mary Sleeper, you and each of you
are hereby notified that you have been sued by
George Sleeper, and that here is now on lille In
office of the Clerk OF the District Court of Allen
County, state of Kansas, petition of the
plaintiff in the above estitled case, and that
You must answer the said petition filed by said
plaintiff on or before the twenty third (23dI day
of september, \. d. 1882, or the petition will
be taken as true and judgment rendered thereon
decreeing the said purchase by the said James
Sleeper in his own name of said judgment and
his assignment afterwards of the same to
the said Mary Sleeper, fraudulent and void
as to the rights OF this plaintiff and that the
said plaintiff, George sleeper, is the owner alb
solutely OF said judgment and mortgage
You are further notified That on the third day
of August, A %. 1852, the Hon. II. w. Talcott,
Judge of the said Court and of the 18th Judicial
District at Chambers, granted temporary in-
junction, or restraining order restraining the
said Mary sleeper from making any sale or
transfer of said judgement assigned to her by
said defendant, james Sleeper, and restraining
the said defendant David Worst, sheriff of Al
len county, Kansas, from selling the said land
under the order of sale as shown by exhibit A of
said petition. And that the further hearing of
this case will be had on the 30th day Of August,
A. ID. 1882, at 10 O'Clock a m. of said day at
the office of the said Judge, Hon ii. W Tai
colt in lola, Kansas, and that unless you APP
pear and answer and defend at said time and
place the injunction will be granted, injoining
the said Mary Sleeper from any sale or trans
fer of said judgment assigned to her by said de-
fendent, James sleeper, pending this littiga-
ton and the final determination of this case
GEORGE SLEEPER.
BY his Atty X III. Knight.
Attest: WM. DAVIS, Clerk of District Court
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11

At the Greenback Congressional
Convention. last week, while argu-
ments were being made, i'm an anti
room, for and against ''fusing" with
the Democrats, before committee APP
pointed for the purpose of considering
the disability of the matter, one of
the Greenbaek orators amused the
Republican end Disguised the Dem
ecratic spectators by yelling out loud
enough to be heard by all, that if they
made a contract for '.fusion" they
could not deliver the goods.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
SuGday-sc.aool Convention.

The seventh: annual convention OF
the fourth Sunday-sclool district OF
Kansas, comprising fhe' counties OF
Labette, Neosho, Allen, Woodson,
Wilson, Montgomery, ChaYtauqua,
and Elk, will Be held at OswegO,
Kansas, on Tuesday, Wednesday and
Thursday, September 8, 8 and Z, 1882.
The exercises viii commence at p.
M. on Tuesday, and close Thursday
noon. All S4lday-school workers in
the District are invited to come and
enjoy the hospitality Of their co-work-
ers i'm QsWego. Come, regardless OF
whether OF not you are delegate.
The delegation from each county
should expect to contribute at least
five dollars. Application has been
made, but no promise has yet been re-
ceived Cor reduced railroad fare.
NELSON CASE,
Pres't. 4th Dist. S. S. Association.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
State Convention.

Up to time of going to press, four
o'clock Thursday afternoon, We have
no news from the Republican State
Convention. The Convention met
Wednesday afternoon and effected a
temporary organization, appointed
committees, ETC., and adjourned till
Thursday morning. II is universally
conceded, of course, that Gov. st.
John will be nominated. AS to the
rest of the ticket we have no Informal
tionr that would enable US to make an
intelligent guess.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Land Case.

The following dispatches were re-
ceived from Hon. D. G. Haskell:
WASHINGTON, d. c. Aug.7, 'S2.
II. Il. Perkins:-The Secretary of
the Interior has asked the Attorney
General to bring suit in the Allen
County land case.
d. &. HASKELL.
WASHINGTON, d. G. Aug. 8, 'S2.
II. 4. Perkins:-The Attorney Gen
eral has ordered suit to be brought in
the land case. d. &. HASKELL.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Farm for Sale.

100 acres, within three miles of
Yates Center, WoodsOn county. Kan
sas; known as the "PetterRell farm"
can be procured on the best terms of
any property in Kansas.
GEO. H. SPRAGuE.
Box 5, Olatha, Kansas. ,.....
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Letter List.

List of letters remaining in the post
office at lola Kansas, Aug. II, 1882:
Butcher, G w Mitchell, q w
BlakemOre, E A3 Nelson, Mrs A
Hill. w w Whey, Andrew
Hollinway, NM Young, Henry
Hatch, Eva
Persons calling for these letters
please say advertised"
&. NJ. SIMPSON, p. NJ.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
For SAFE.

A house and three lots in the south-
eastern part of town. The house con-
tains five room. There is well of ex-
cellent water and an abundance Of
excellent fruit on the property. For
further particulars call at this office.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Notice.

To those knowing themselves in
debted to US by book account or other
wise will please call and settle the
same on or before the lst of Septem-
Der, 1882, by cash or by note, cash
preferred.
RICHARDS LAKIN & IRELAND.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11
Primary.

The Republican electors of Geneva
township are requested to meet at the
post office, Tuesday, August 22nd, at
2 O'Clock p. m. to elect delegates to the
county convention at lola, Saturday
August Goth 1882.
- P. r. MCCLURE.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11

August 9th was st. Johns day at
Topeka. John a. Martin, of the
Atchison Champion, and Baker, of
the Commonwealth, had charge of the
mourners.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-08-11

The Miami Republican says that
"St. John did not create the temper
ance,ship, but he was smart enough to
get on board pretty early in the yoy-
age.o