Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1882-01-06
CHARLIE.
An Episode in the Annals of the MAJ

An Episode In the Annals of the Mag
Club.
1.-THE Magi," we modestly called our.
selves. We were u club of young lit.
erary aspirants and, as nearly every
Magian'' had articles in print, held
our heads pretty high. After fifty years
experience I've come to think that nc
such obnoxious creature lives rs a man
rehcarsing, socially, his public role OF
journalist, punster or critic; but then il
seemed fine thing to scintillate sparks
of ones latest magazine brilliancy, in a
friendly way, upon ones fellow immor-
tails. We had only single member
who was absolutely without literary pre-
tension. He got in because / was pres
ident and had introduced him-that,
too, Just at moment when an initiation
his name-a chap out from England for
Yorkshire firm, correspondents of the
house where was serving n restless
term at bookkeeping, being meanwhile
eaten up with longings after authorship.
Well, Deniston was our stupid, good
natured fellow. who spoke little, being
overawed by our accomplishments, but,
as he said: "Thout it foin t hear clever
chaps discussin'."
One night we voted prize for the
best original story. A silver cup was
decided upon, and the subscriptions
footed up so literally that the confidence
of each individual Magain in his own
powers was clearly set forth. The even
ing came for the competition, and
Phipps, a reporter on the Trumpctcr,
led off with an anecdotc about a darky.
The mimicry of negro dialect set Deni-
son laughing so flatteringly long and
loud that Phipps condescended to open
conversation with him, asking when he
expected to return to England.
'.Aboot t back end o next week, "
says Deniston; whereat the fellows
roar and Deniston innocently joins in,
remarking:
"Ycs; that was foonny tale aboot
darky. and weel told, too-weel told"
The cup stood in the middle of our
great table, just before my presidential
chair. 1t glistencd with snowy chasing,
bore an inscription beginning ardentia
Uerbd, and, for the occasion, was filled
with flowers.
Next followed little Hopkinson, a
young journalist, the mildest man
among us, with the description of muir
der in Il city den; tragic it was, soaked
in the dregs of crime and ghastly with
the lights of the station-house.
.That is reel horrid tale," ex-
claimed Deniston. 81 whoap it's not
true"
Hopkinson produced police report,
written up by himself, in an old copy of
his paper as proof of his strict adherence
to facts.
The club set up sort of derision, but
Deniston read the article and an
nounccd:
Its n here i print, true as gospel. a"
Poor old Denr' said L. "Now, Or
der, and the next"
1t proved catch from Tom Smart.
An old farmer, on a Sound steamer,
about returning to his home in the hills
of Vermont, was arrested on the charge
of passing counterfeit money. He sworc
that he was innocent, and implored Tom
Smart to see safely to her home cher as
lies in the state-room thar, SIR" Tom
gave the homely pathos of the old man
parting words: Take care on her, sir
see her safe home. She was kinder
run deoun, yer see, an l brung her tel
York ter git her doctored up, an neouw
she's purifier nor ever. Take care Oh
her. sir; git her home, an Heaven bles.
yer"
After much sentiment and artistic mis-
leading Tom says:
There, reposing on the state-roon
couch, bathcd in a glorious sunset ligh
that filled the air with visions, found
- CHere he pauses and looks around.
Gsnlh p,,ax,fc IannrI,tnr. ~
Deniston, eagerly and deeply interested.
Smart doesn't stop for guesses from
us older hands, but shrewdly ends b,
saying:
II found the old mans kitchen clocl
and chucked the confounded thing over
board"
"So-so" is, the verdict. Nobod,
laughs very much and Smart tries t.
look as if he doesn't care.
But Deniston is pleased and says: ."
thout it was all reel, you told it so hon
est loike. It's reel wonderful"
Then comes the youngest man in th,
company-Gus X Van Rensler-ius
nineteen, with story of his life in Paris
that amuses us greatly and draws lou,
applause.
Dcniston remarks: THAT would be
foine tale, lad, ef 'twarn't so indecent. ;
AT this we all laugh still more, ant
young Gus feels proud of his experience
and swears the worst oath he knows tina
it's every word true.
Next was heard Major Boon, the old
est of us and the most distinguishe,
socially. "Old Boom" we called him
because he was so ponderous and alto
gether such big gun. He gave him
self out as the hero of tiger fight dur
ing service in India. His success wa
nearly assured when he threw in, un
luckily, an account OF the Indian baske
trick in choice style, but taken directl
from certain book of travels. Some
body recognized the stolen rhetoric, an,
"Old Boom sat down amid Kisses.
There were long stories and short
broad stories and fiat, until we wer
fairly tired out and the contest ceased
The committee asked an hour for clear
ing their judgment and rendering al
impartial verdict. During that time W
sat smoking and slipping last a
exercise that no good Magian ever neg
lected.
OF course we discussed the stories tha
had been told, and Deniston was enthr
siastic in praise Of several. He clappe
the boys on the back, and said:
"Ho! dunno which Of ye deserve
the best, ye war all SO good.n
Phipps asked. condescendingly; "Wh
don't You try your hand, Denistonp"
"MeP" says Deniston. tsWhy,
could niyer think o. soomat TO say, am
ef / did | couldn't say It," Here i
laughed at himself with the rest Of u