davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1882-03-24


The telephone recently gave man
lesson Ia spelling. hut he was 20 dull that
4 boy hal h b. called IN 10 aid him. II
seems thnl Mr.. Jones. senior partner u
Jones a Son. had telephone PIT ia his
grocery. II took him several days 70
become familiar with the Instrument.
but he found Il paid y have customers
order goods by telephone from dis.
lnnce. when before he had one. they
would run % the nearest shop.
Mr.. Jones was congiatulafing himself
upon this one morning, when the tele-
phone hell rung.
After The usual number ~ hc'loes. Ne
distinctly caught m order for ten
pounds u sugar. two pounds of coffee,
d pound Of crackers. half a buShcl q
potatoes and peck Of apples % be de-
liyercd; but he didn't quite catch the
name.
After several vain trials. hr asked The
person sending the message 70 spell IL
while with his pencil he prepared %
write il down on sheet % wrapping
Double ~ said ehc voice. Jones
wrote II down and said: Yes"
double Il.
live got that
"Wcll, put il down again.
Yes; ~ ahead.
.Double n.
"Why. I've got that"
Put II down again.
!" In; hayc II down twice."
"Wcll. put Il down three times"
Jones sighed and wrote il again.
A double Il.
"a double 4 that's add" solilo-
quized Jones: then he shouted back:
/" Add what"
ADD nothing just put down q
This i nonsense muttered Jones:
but he chcerfully called back " ies; 60
| ahead. I"
II double l."
.Wha-a-t M
4 IL double l. ("
Mr.. Jones stamped or he floor, and
pulled his whiskers savage!y; but he
put il down and swcclly answered.
..Yes.
That's ALL"
..All whatF'
sAll the name"
Then Mr.. Jones s.us:ed his paper
carefully amomcnt. when he had written
thus, ..uuuuuu del III and re-
marked 10 himself: why. that's con-
founded nonsense.
He then helloed through the telephone
in vain. and r,ing up the central Office
and inquired III vain who had been talk
ing with him. Then he studied his
writing again.
Pretty soon in came his son. the junior
partner. Mr.. Jones showed him the let
tiers and told him how he got them.
The junior partner studied them,
read them both ways. looked on the
back Of the paper and finally said Il
was the greatest bosh he ever saw.
They showed the paper 70 the book
keeper. and he said il was sheer fool
ishness The big clerk said il was abb
surd. The little clerk thought somebody
was crazy.
Finally the GRAND boy looked at Il
and was told that il was meant for some
customers name; thereuPon he asked
Mr.. Jones to call on the letters As near
as he could remember the same a he
had received them by telephone.
Mr. Jones did 30. when the crrand
boy nearly chcked with laughing, and
said:
why. that's perfectly plain; it's W.
w. Waddell.
Mr.. Jones has not felt such an inn
mense relief since he went into business.
--Y0uN's Companion.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1882-03-24

SERGEANT MASON, who shot at Gui-
seau, has been sentenced % Be di@honorably
discharged from the army and imprisoned
Tor eight years q hard labor.
THE Executive Committee Of the So-
ciety 81 the Army Of the Tennessee have
completed arrangements FOR the fifteenth
annual reunion, which b 70 be held In 81.
Louis on May 10 and II.
AGENT ARMSTRONG has been In
structed b. the Secretary q The Interior q
send the one hundred Indian children un-
der bis care q the Crow agency, Montana,
70 certain farmers n Ohio, 20 be educated
and reared up 20 usefulness.
II October last two miners lost their
| lives and several Others were scriously n.
| jured y Mahanoy CITY pal CoIIierys q
account o. gsngway not being properly
| timbered. The lssne inspector q that d.
trict t-cught suit under The mining law
against George 0ilgore. inside superintend-
ent, - resposible FOR thc safety % inside
working. The Gee va given 70 the jury q
| March n, end resulted n verdict Of guilty.
with recommendation % mercy.
/ FR0N . point twenty miles below
Memphis, where ths 1rst break 4 the -
! sissIppI levss oceurreds the entire oountry
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1882-03-24
TOPICS OF THE DAY.
News from Everywhere.


mission bin 70 she Finance Committee was
rejected BY che senate. March Sth- The Chi
ncsc hill wa= taken up and debated 90 length:
Ingalls, amendment limiting the coming Of
eees ss,e ss q e ea spsns
: little scene which introduced Ne<sr<. Tel:
Ter. ingalls,. and Dawes. NJ. Edmnnds held
al ne ,se rsss q he eeens e
other people. An idea followed n
s :ns eS".' sewers. y saaFa r sss
one 81 which provides thai the act shall NOT
ssss ffss az "e Is ssompese he ssss @
sppropriat5 ~ 900 Tor improvements i q Mem
3ass Va: 9s pfcsane shas K shs y
% designate 6ili Which shan Be- nrst consid.
seeard Tn ssF bin R' ap pes asn er
Discussion Of the anti.polyeamy bin was cut
short By motion 20 adjourn.
In the Senate. March 9th. resolutions
were adopted instructing the state Depart
ment 70 ascertain the cause Of imprisonment
BY the British Government Of Daniel Nc
swccny = citizen Of the United states; in
etrucfinE the Secretary OF War 20 report the
cost. &C.. Of the sturgeon l;ay and lake Mich.
the propricty OF making the canal free
The bill for commission on the liquor
srs was dissu ss, "a ana ;ssn ssrss
members shall be Of the same political party
The Chinese bill. providing that from and n.
ssr sne eSp Pr no 2, nn d ~ exnirnsoe
of twenty years after its passage. the coming
of Chinese laborers 20 the United states shall
e s sn aers
and referred Several amendments 20 the
agrieulinrsl approximation BIN were adopted.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1882-03-24

An English thief. on stolen horse,
was captured BY : policeman On aby-
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1882-03-24


~ vo'os 800. 5000
70 war Win veFm.ny 1870 f'-ss u. .r...-
ersnee 4Fom tne n'.en'1-''on' y 49, ~'-"'
Inier.
IHk President nas nominated SuoSc
samuel blAtcnforo 80 A~<e1Me 'usnoe ~
the supreme Sour', anu 'onn nus<e" ho""s
- Minister f.sn'P'ten''A's - ~"'"
SHERIFF fikALkf, O. Montana' -
been released ~ the na'f-nreeu oei''kesen'-'
and has returned % Fon benton.
RUFUS INGALLS, mas been conntuneo
- Quartcrma<ter- General Of the Army.
GEN. w. II. WRIGHT, who died IN
Philadelphia : few days ago. was once CHIEF
or the Engineer Corps Of the Army Of
the Potomac. and commanded the pioneers
on Gen. sherman's - srch % the sea. He
built the bridges q Leavenworth anA A.
Gibson. and went 70 the isfhmus o. fAnamA
with Count De Le>seps.
COMMISSIONER SHIELDS, q New
YORK. refused naturalization papers % Hop
Sing. part owner Of silver mine IN Nevada.
on the ground that Chinaman = not iree
white person under the statute
cowwrRcE Ann INDUSTRY.
Twr,vr hundred persons were pres
y, ~. ~.,s,, h,me,sl,,c meeting n Lon
NJ. $500, co.,,rie- heIng represented.
, m. .cxernor y 49, Rank 81 England advo-
c.,sd ~ free coinage * silver.
Norw1rusrArprxo the damage
..,s.d ~ ~ aoois. n 4 thought that III
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
The Difference.

The male and female clerks in Wash
ington are thus contrasted: It is COM
mon enough to see male clerk saunter-
ing through the corridors during office
hours, alone and unattended, but fe-
male clerk never. They always are
found in pairs. When female clerk
wants to leave her desk and go out into
the corridors, similar desire is sure to
seize another female clerk, and they 90
out together. There has never been a
case recorded where female clerk has
left her work during office-hours and ap-
peared in the corridors alone. There are
always two of them, generally with arms
twined afectionately, and, at the same
time, gracefully, about each other, slowly
pacing the corridors. This fact is SIN
gular, and may be important. There
may be scientific, perhaps psyche
logical, reason for this phenomenon. It
can't be because of their social natures,
for when they leave the departments for
their homes this dual condition of affairs
no longer exists. They go along the
streets alone, but in the corridors of the
department they are found in pairs.
This phenomenon is an interesting one.
and should be investigated, and no
doubt rich results would be obtained
and much light thrown on the vexed
problem of the female nature,
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
SHAVING IN OLD TINES.

Shaving, in the olden days, was a
lengthy operation, and English BARRIERS
devised various methods of amusing
their customers while awaiting their
turn. They generally provided some
musical instrument, such as guitar or
either. In old pictures the shaving
basin fitted into the chin until recent
period BARRIERS were wont to bleed a pa
tent and even extract teeth. In London
the familiar BARRIERS pole, with it's red
spiral coil of color, is Renaissance of
the staff the surgeon gave his customers
to grasp while he was being bled. The
tape or bandage was twisted round the
pole, which when not in use was placed
outside the door. This staff was by Or
der left outside surgeons door, as a
sign Of his profession, and for conven-
fence the painted pole was substituted
as sign, and the right to use it was ex-
tended to BARRIERS about the year 1870.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27

The old Duke of Wellington carried
his punctilliousness and sense of justice
into every transaction. He was very
DESTROYS Of purchasing a farm adjacent
to his estate of Strathfeldsaye, and gave
his agent elders to negotiate. A few DAYS
after he was congratulated by friend
upon having obtained bargain, as the
owner of the farm was IN difficulties.
"What sort of bargain ?" asked the
Iron Duke. ssWell, the property was
valued at Ell, 600, but the man was glad
to take 4S.000." lis that 500" asked
Wellington, turning to his agent. and,
receiving an affirmative reply, he said
quickly, "Then take the extra f3, 900 to
the last owner, and never speak to me of
cheap land again"
DIR. DELANEY says if you sleep on
your right side your dreams will be old
and faint remembrances the dreams
are aptto be childish andillogical; sleep
ers on the right side also compose verses.
They send them to the newspapers next
day. Sleepers on the left side dream
intelligent dreams about recent events.
So If q man wants to dream what his
wife used to say to him and about him
before they were married he must sleep
on his right side; if he wants to dream
of what she says to him now, he must
sleep on his left side.
THERE are 225 Indians still remaining
In South Florida. They are peaceful
and hold friendly relations with the
white settlers.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27

GIBBoN began to write his decline
and Fall Of the Roman Empire" in Lon
don in 1772.
In Moscow the plague introduced by
the Turkish army carried off 0,G00 VIC
TINS in month.
DURING the fourteenth and fifteenth
centuries in France guilty animals SUI
fered death On the gallows.
PEAoooKs were carefully reared in the
island Of Samos, and sold at such high
prices that Varo says they fetched yearly
1000.
The Franklin Arctic expedition sailed
from Greenhithe. England, May "a.
1916. The last heard from them were
dispatches sent from the Whalefsh
islands dated July -, 1916.
THE English language has a greater
number of words than the French.
There are also in English a greater
number of ways to express thoughts
than in French.
The expression commencement ex-
ercises is applied to the conclr ding
exercises of college term, from the
fact that they mark the Commences
ment" of the graduates independent
life.
THE invention of glass is commonly
attributed to the Phcenicians. Very an
cient discoveries of glass in Egypt have
somewhat shaken this attribution, and
it will remain uncertain until further
discoveries settle the question.
THE phrase ''suited to T " is said to
be derived from the so-called T-square,
an instrument used by architects and
mechanical draughtsmen in drawing
plans. AS the T-square is often used to
test the accuracy with which lines and
angles have been drawn, it is altogether
probable that the expression originated
In this fact.
The word "vendetta (vengeance)
originated, i, is said, in Corsica, where
the practice was formerly general, and
still prevails in remote parts of the
island. The custom, one writer re-
marks grimly, fourishes among the
Bedouins. Traces of it are found some
times among the Montenegrins, Alban-
deed, it may be said that the custom
prevailed at one time or another among
every tribe and nation. Whenever a
person was murdered, the practice
among those holding to this custom was
to avenge the death; and that duty was
imposed upon the son, brother or near
est kinsman, who forthwith sought pri-
vate vengeance upon him who shed the
blood of the relative. AS the admins
tration of justice became a more and
more settled social institution, the GUS
tom disappeared, although Corsica still
clings to it in its most cruel form, and
on that island it plays a most important
part in social life.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
The East River. Bridge.

The following dimensions of the vari.
GUS parts of the great bridge spanning
the East river at Brooklyn and New
York will prove of interest:
Length Of river span, 1886 feet 6
inches.
Length of each land span, $50 feet.
Length of Brooklyn approach, gu
feet.
Length of New York approach, 1862
feet inches.
Total length of bridge, $3.50 feet.
Width Of bridge, IS feet.
Number of cables, four.
Diameter of each cable, 15s inches.
Length of each single wire in cables.
3,57S feet 6 inches.
Ultimate strength of each cable, 12,-
200 tons.
Weight of wire, - feet per pound.
Each cable contains 1926 parallel (not
twisted) galvanized steel, ol-coated
wires, closely wrapped to q solid cylin-
der 152 inches in diameter.
Size of towers at high-water line, 40
x59 feet.
Size Of towers at roof course, 136x53
feet.
Total height of towers above high wa
ter, 27S feet.
Clear height of bridge in center of
river span above high water, 1876 feet.
Height of floor at towers above high
water, 119 feet inches.
Height of towers above roadway, 159
feet.
New York tower contains 46, 945 cubic
yards masonry.
Brooklyn tower contains 3S, 214 cubic
yards masonry.
New York caisson weighs 1000 tons.
Weight of concrete filing, 5000 tons
Size of anchorages at base, 129x119
feet.
Size of anchorages at top, 117x1O4
feet.
Height of anchorages, SO feet front,
SIS feet rear.
Weight of each anchor plate, % tons,
First wire run across May 20. 1877.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
Tinkerrns over the Tariff.

BosToN, Aug. 25.-The tariff commission
was addressed by Ed. Latkins, of Boston, on
the sugar importing interests. He favored a
reduction in the tariff on sugar because the
consumers would th1s get it at a reduced
price. The increa2e of consumption would
remove the temptation to adulterate aud
eventually induce Spain from comfy and
good feeling to reduce her duty on an article
exported from this country,and open her mar
kets to American manufacturers. James
Thomas, president Of the Standard Sugar
company, of Boston, endorsed the
views of the last speaker and said
his company asked for a law which
will not discriminate against the importation
of low priced sugar. D Townsend, OF the
Continental company, of Boston, advocated an
advalorem duty. The present law, he be-
leved ,discriminates in favor of certain classes,
notably those on the Pacific coast, as against
the East. This is partially due tolthe Hawaiian
commits sion. Adjourned until tomorrow.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
Asking FOR Money.

One of the very best wives and mothers
I have ever known, whose husband was
OF a most generous disposition and de-
MED her nothing, once said to me that
whenever her daughters should be mar
RED she should stipulate in their behalf
with their husbands for a regular sum of
money to be paid them at certain inter-
walls for their expenditures. 81 suppose
no man, she said, "can possibly under
stand how sensitive woman shrinks
from asking for money. If I can pre-
vent it, my daughters shall never have
to ask for it. If they do their duty as
wives and mothers they have right to
their share of the joint income within
reasonable limits for certainly no money
could buy the services they render
r. ". Higgiason.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
The Adobe House.

Our critical Eastern visitors, who rid
icule our adobe houses, know not where
of they speak. There is no more solid
comfort and uniformity of temperature
to be found anywhere than inside the
thick walls of an "adobe." The coolest
OF houses in hot weather, they are warm
when the weather becomes more frig;d.
The handsome residences of some of our
people show how N UGH can be done
with the adobe bricks when handled
with taste, backed by money.-7ucson
(Ari.) Journal.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
GETTING EVEN WITH THE COACH-
MIN.

It is related that on the occasion of
large party Mrs. Chase-Sprague sent for
her coachman and told him that she ex-
pected him either to open the door or to
assist in the cloak-room. The coach
man impudently answered that he was
hired to drive the horses and not help in
the house. every WE'LL" said Mrs.
Sprague, "have my carriage at the door
at clock At o'clock the carriage
drove up. Blanket the horses and
wait until I send further word" From
8 O'Clock of chill winter evening until
? o'clock of colder morning, the coach
man sat with stiffening arms CO his box,
and when the last guest had gone his
orders came to drive to the stable.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
Arthur's Vacation.

NEWPORT, K. l., Aug. 25.-The dinner
given to President Arthur tonight by ex-
Gov. Morgan, of New York, was brilliant
and select affair. Only few personal friends
were invited. The president met many guests
at the reception given by Chas. Fl. Russell, of
New York. Over 800 people were present.
Later in the evening the president attended q
ball given by Commodore Baldwin, of the
I nited States navy, at his villa. The ball was
one of the most elegant affairs ever given here,
the elite of the summer residents being pres
emit. The president attended to considerable
business early in the day, and tomorrow will
visit Coasters Island harbor in company with
the secretary of the navy. He will also visit
the polo grounds, attend a fete champetre,
and dine with John Jacob Astor in the even
ing.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
Scientists in Session.

MONTREAL, Aug. 25.-The American asso-
down to business to-day, and.a large amount
of work was done. The secretary announced
that 2S2 new members had joined the associa-
ton since the meeting opened here. num-
Der of instructive papers were read. Prof.
Bell excited great interest when describing his
instrument for determining the location of a
bullet in the human body. An excursion for
members of the association takes place to
Ottawa tomorrow.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27

THE Atlanta GA Constitution thinks
that, under an memorable pressure that
is beyond the reach of influence or argu-
ment, the plantations will split into
small farms, and small farmers will take
the place of large planters. The same
causes that sliced nearly 10000 farms
from the Georgia plantations in the ten
years preceding 1SS0will cut off as many
more between now and 1890.
A PICKERING pair of Quakers were
lately heard in high controversy, the
husband exclaiming: st am deter
mined to have one quiet week with thee. -
But how wilt thou be able to get it -
said the taunting spouse, in that sort of
reiteratiol which married ladies so pro
vokingly indulge in. 81 will keep thee
week after thou art dead" was the
Quaker's reioinder.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27

Hon. I'D. Templin, one of the oldest Iowa law.
yers, legal author of note and prominent
citizen, died In Iowa City yesterday after q
long sickness.
Harvey Richards, William B. Williams, AL.
fred Klug, David Davis and Humphrey Vaughs
were seriously burned in the Hollenback mine
near Wilkesbarre, Pa, yesterday afternoon by
an explosion of gas.
At Omaha last evening the citizens gave q
banquet to Gen. Geo. Crooks, late in ,com.
mand of the department of the Platte, prior to
his departure for Arizona. 125- courses were
lid. There were the usual tossts and re-
sponses.
Sir Frederick Leighton, president OF the
Royal academy, has written to VIM. Cox Ben.
nett cousenting to add his name to the list OF
those willing to promote the project of plac.
ing bust OF the poet Longfellow in West
minister abbey.
Suit has been begun against Mr.. Kelly OF
New York, for libel, growing out of charges
made against Mr.. Walton at the Long Branch
meeting. Walton and w. O'Donoghne, the
jockey who rode Marathon. have begun suit!
for $4,000 and $40 900 respectively.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-27
MISCELLANEOUS.

Cannibals sometimes have their neigh
bors at dinner.
Boston girls never hang up their
stockings; IN exchange says that they
suspend their hosiery.
Old Nichelpinch says he has often
seen men bucl, the tiger, but for his
part he would rather backwheat cakes.
Be not cast down, impecuniOus sir;
there is plenty of good things in store
for you. ali you need is the money to
get them out.
DR.. Swing says that in time women
will develop into angels. No one was
ever bold enough to accuse man of any
intentions in that direction.
To the query of Danbury dentist
to an applicant for new set as to what
sort OF teeth she wanted, she said,
Something that won't show dirt"
Alliance oyster buyer is the latest
designation for q girls young man.
The name will be changed to engaged
ice cream purchaser in the summer.
The worst about kissing q Pittsburg
girl is ti.at you carry the marks of coal
DIST about your nose and other features
till you reach the nearest pump
burlington Haackeye.
A Northern paper praises the Gin
dian Hair Restorer." He is fraud.
No Indian was ever known to restore
any hair. He files it away as certifi-
cate on which to draw rations from
Uucle Sam.
A young man, while out searching for
his fathers pig, accosted an Irishman
as follows: '1Have you seen a stray
PIC about here?'' Pat responded:
s.Faix, how could tell a stray pig from
any other?"
A Milwaukee policeman has fallen
heir to 100000, and every female cook
on his beat wants him to keep his prom
Use at once, and he wonders how he's
going to avoid about fifty breach of
promise suits.
''Give me the hand that will never
deceive me- said young Harmelite
in the presence of some young ladies
the other evening. 81 guess" said .
young lady, "a straight flush is the
only kind of hand you want"
Rejected lovers need never despair.
There are four-and-twenty hours in a
day, and not moment in the twenty
four in which woman may not change
her mind De Fenod.
Georgia is gradually arranging a mil
lennium of its own. The new Consti-
tuition of that State provides that the
Legislature shall meet but once in two
years, and then sit but forty days.
Herr ReulauX, German writer, has
described an elevated wooded valley in
the Rhine Province, in which the pas
sage of the wind produces musical tones
wonderfully like the Ginning of bells.
They were walking by the seaside,
and he sighed and she sighed; and she
was by his side, and he by her side, and
they were both beside themselves, be-
side being at the seaside, where she
sighed and he sighed.
Andreac's Bd1dr says that lady
who owns an amiable husband was
asked how she had ever brought him
to such perfection; whereupon she
sweetly answered that she did it with
croquet mallet.
A shop was broken into one night,
but strange to say, nothing was carried
off. The proprietor was making his
boast of it, at the same time expressing
his surprise at losing nothing. 'Noth-
ing at all surprising" said his neigh
bors; ''the robbers lighted lamp, Gidn' t
they?" EYES," was the reply. WELL"
continued the neighbor, ''they found
your goods marked up so high they
couldn't afford to take them"