davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
In All Her Ignorance.

The ignorant young lady may be q
beautiful creature, graceful In her man
ners, pleasant in her department and
possessed of a sufficient stock of CONVEX
sational power to entrap some poor fell
low into matrimony. Under our laws
there is no bureau of examination to test
her qualifications for assuming the re-
sponsibilities of married life. The young
man who takes her for better or for
worse can act as examining board at his
leisure and report at his convenience OF
inconvenience, as the case may be. He
is likely to find that although she may
have entranced him with the fuency of
her speech at party or ball during the
blissful experience of courtship, her en-
deavors at housekeeping are anything
but blissfpl. When she undertakes to
bake biscuits the products of her first
days work may be sold either for paving
stones or base-balls. When she wrestIes
with cobwebs the industrious spider
gets the better of her. When she at
tempts to set a room to rights she leaves
it looking as if her neighbors had been
holding a picnic in it.
But it is when the ignorant young
lady becomes a mother that her natural
lack of knowledge is most conspicuously
displayed. Such a case has recently
been brought to light in one of the
pretty villages on the Hudson River.
The lady had been brought up among
surroundings of wealth and luxury and
had allowed much useful information to
skip past her without taking the trouble
improve it. One day it became neces-
sary to give her bouncing baby boy a
l1kl - L., 1,kk1a -, 1akL k,I GIo -,,4
him into water which was too cool for
him, when happily her mother-in-law
came into the room and told her that
the child would be chilled to death unless
the water were made warmer. She
knew that heating water generally made
it warmer, and so, instead of adding
some hot water to the cool contents of
the tub, she stood the whole, baby and
all, over the gas stove. Presently the heat
had its effect. The bottom of the tub
began to be hot and the child wriggled
around in a way which showed that he
was uncomfortable. AS it grew hotter
and hotter he set up his little pipes in a
piercing yell.
The mother was not greatly alarmed
by this, for since the days of Cain, the
first recorded infant, it has been custom
airy for baby boys to yell when they felt
like it. But soon the heat increased SO
much hat the baby, with one agonizing
scream, kicked the tub owe and rolled
out on the floor, upsetting the gas stove,
drenching his mother with scalding
water, and summoning the affrighted
mother-in-law to the rescue. While
young Mrs. Ignorance was busy faint
ing, the old lady and the servants gath.
cred up the parboiled infant and put
him in a place of safety. Thus does the
young woman who never learned in girl
hood become acquainted with the rela-
tions of hot water to babies and of babies
to hot water. It is never too late to
earn.-PhtL16eLphSG Times.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
"A Lost Alligator Recovered.

About eighteen months ago the Eco
logical Garden loaned to the Exposition
a young alligator two feet long to adorn
the cascade in horticultural Hal and
give al appearance OF wildness to the
artificial scene by the presence Of animal
life of q repulsive kind. The alligator
behaved very well for sometime, and
satiated his appetite with bugs, flies and
mosquitoes. But one night he disap-
peared, and he was mourned for lost or
stolen, although the Commissioners
thought that there was no man in Gin
cinnati mean enough to carry away an
alligator. In q few months the absence
of the loathsome creature was forgotten,
ana 1t was believed that he wandered off
and died.
Recently It became necessary to hire
the services of a gas filter at Music Hall
and MI. Tom Wise sent for Mr.. p. J..
Hogan to connect the street gas with the
Music Hall Building. It will be remem-
bered that the Elm-street front of Horti-
cultural Hall is about three feet above
the level of the part used for the cas-
cade and exhibit OF plants. Into this
raised portion MI. Hogan went boldly
with q wrench and lantern, but he had
scarcely disappeared from view when q
most unearthly yell was heard, and the
poor plumber, without lantern, hat OF
tools, rushed out to where the astonished
Wise and his assistants stood. Hogan's
hair stood up like bristles ON the fretful
porcupine, and his eyes rolled with such
an expression of terror that the other
men shrunk from him. He could hardly
calculate: "Be is, I'll not go in there
agin. There's the most inferrnal-lookin'
cratur I ever saw. It opened its big jaws
and wagged its baistly tail at me, and
wanted to ait me ur. Be heavens, when
it moved I moved, too. The gas may go
to the diyil."
Mr.. Wise, thinking the man frightened
without cause, undertook to explore the
cavern and beard the monster in his den,
but he was only absent q few seconds,
and made quicker time in reaching day
light than Hogan. He stayed long
enough, however, to find out that the
riptile was an alligator, and at q rapid
glance seemed to measu four feet in
length. Here, then, was the alligato,
which. was supposed to be lost, and
Hogan had found him. It had probably
crawled into this retreat and had hiber.
mated in the moist, marshy ground. The
food which Mr.. Alligator had INDUCED
in probably consisted of rats and small
bugs and insects. At any rate, he was
still alive and increased his length dur
ing his mysterious absence about two
feet. But there seems to be o DISPOSE
ton to let him severely alone for the
time being. Later the floor was removed
and Nj. Alligator was captured and re
turned to the Geological Garden.-CEn
cinnoti Enquirer.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
Act Well Your Part.

Whoever hesitates to utter that Which
he thinks the highest truth, lest it should
be too much in advance Of the time,
may reassure himself by looking at his
acts from an impersonal point Of view.
Let him only realize the fact that opin-
ion is the agency through which char
acter adapts external arrangements to
itself-that is a unit of force, constitut-
ing, with other such units, the general
power which works out social changes ;
and he will perceive that he may prop
erly give full utterance to his innermost
convictions /; leaving it to produce what
effect it may.
It is not for nothing that he has in
those sympathies with some principles
and repugnance to others. He, with all
his capacities, and aspirations, and be-
liefs, Is not an accident, but a product of
the time.
He must remember that while he is a
descendant of the past, he is a parent of
the future, and that his thoughts are as
children born to him, which he may
not carelessly let die. He, like every
other man, may properly consider him
self as one of the myriad agencies
through whom works the unknown
cause; and when the unknown cause
produces in him a certain belief, he is
thereby authorized to profess and act
out that belief. For, to render, in their
highest sense, the words Of the past:
Mature Is made by no means,
But nature makes that mean; over that art
Which you say adds to nature, Is an art
That nature makes"
Not as adventitious, therefore, will
the wise man regard the faith which is
in him. The highest truth he sees he
will fearlessly utter, knowing that, Let
what may come OF it, he is thus playing
his right part in the Notwithstanding
that if he can effect the part he aims 1t
well if not-wsll also Though not 80
wen.-Rer6er Spencer,
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
Tn. sbovman,s Trade.

A Snowman, after assuring q reporter
that nothing pleases the people more
than something full Of peril and blood
shed, gives the following incident OF his
career; but we don't vouch for his ruth
fulness-that is, not quite:
ran O whole season on q lion that
had eaten o keeper. The people came IN
crowds, expecting every day to see him
make q breakfast of his trainer. Was he
actually dangerous? Dangerous He
eat another trainer, and then ] lost him..
His widder was actually in love with her
husband, and she swore the animal
should be killed, and the people sided
with her; and as the beast was getting
old, and the KILN made a paying sensa-
ton, I did it. But I made all there was
out of il. I insisted that the husband
should have q gorgeous funeral. She said
there wa nothing to bury, as the lion
had eaten her husband. But amt the
dear departed in the lion? If we bury
the lion, don't we bury the dear de-
partedP' Cert she said. And we had
It, and it was gorgeous. We had a per-
cession with all our wagons In it, the
regular street parade, only all u riders
had black scarfs on 'em, and the wagons
dAu hoISSS dnu eiopLauGS aNu Slcu "oA0
draped in black, and the band played q
dead march. The wilder was in open
carriage in full mourning, with a white
handkerchief with a black border to her
eyes, lookin' on his minatoor. Their
wasn't no minatoor, but she held a case
Just the same. That night the canvas
couldent hold the people. We run that
two weeks to splendid biz. When the
woman got owe her grief, she went into
the lion trainin' herself, ez sSenorita
Aguardente, the Lion Queen. I gave
her some old lions to practice on, and in
less than a month she could doiest as
well as the old man. She waga good
woman, too. She rid in the grand en-
tree, and rid in the Halt in the Desert,
did the barl act, did a good pad act, and
is now practisin' bareback. She juggles
tollable, and does a society song and
dance in a side show. When I get
talent, / pay and keep it. My treasurer
changes the names of my people every
season, SO as to have fresh attractions.
o, I know my biz"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
Tory Pastor in Trouble.

Topv poskor IF Now York vho ID now
with his inimitshle yar;atv comb;nation.
a tour of tha n%r;nc;naI c;t;es al
the ITn;on 10 recoonized az fba leading
character yocal;st and variety narformer
of the limited states, He owns and runs
a 6rst.class theatre on Rroadway New
yort Citv and has gatberad ahont MIN
tha best f,onna of 1sr;atv art;sts that
oo,lJ Lo nhte;ned Tha oornnanv has
inst comnleted a hr;ll;ant~ engagement at
theW alnut-street Theatre PRiIadelphia.
and oftor tbo nrosont to,r+hav nil rean.
49, - Tanr psstor,s own thaatre in
Eaw Vort G;tv M Pastor ia the orioi-
notor ~ b;s nsc,l;or schooI ~ character
.;nn;,a ~ r. 800 b;msolf ;nmansa-
1SeIS,e. hoH;nDnoal;aoJ - IL to1onts
arqa $500
TSS -. - ~, ,-+;,,. no+ M
po.t". snaaouo :. ~. - I,,,sa
- 1870 IVA $500 h;n =. aen;s,
- n-;.ota ~ ha - $50 h.fore the
- eaaHsIan ~
pp u :. ~ ~ us;,o1 hao1.h nd he
reniied that notw;thstand;no tbs strain
80 b;n IN tha 5;soboraa 81 h;s nro.
s=sss;ona1 dn,;es II was syoeilent He
~ oo=oas;anaT1S savore nains either the
resn,t of rbeum.t;c attacIs or colds Int
.nn oomnIa;n+a - that ah.raetor naver
10y t.c,bIa h;m 1oua %. he had fonnd ont q
.emedv for al sIch a=nnov;no affsct;ons1
T asIs2 him wbat The ramodv yas and ha
.aa1:eS ..S4 IaaoL. On >, 1.hon 1900
ffM ~, p.star tb.t ~ h. oona;dared The
Great GermanR ema5v an e~ce1lsnt nren.
ration for tha cnre ~ relief Of rhenma.
t;sm and tbat Il was ahont the onlv
80, ..aa .-~. .,,fa..;onoI naonja
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
The Story DisproYed.

A leading officer in one Of the courts
was charged with never going to
bed sober. OF course he Indignantly
denied the soft impeachment, and he
gave the particulars of a particular night
IN proof. We quote his own words:
Soon after I got in bed, my wife said:
"Why, husband, what's the matter with
you? You act SO strangely" "Therei Is
nothing the matter with me-" said. l;
s'nothing at all" "Im sure there is"
said she; "you don't act natural at all.
Shan't I get up and get something for
your" And she got up, lighted the can
die and came to the bedside to look at me,
shading the light with one hand. ST
knew there was something about you,"
said she; "why, you are sober!"-BW-
falo Express.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
How the Aurora is Formed.

n tneof Ptopo9naeo
to o Ior the observed interreia1on
OF earth currents, magnetic storms au-
ora and sun spots. Professor Adams
assumes q sun TO pc magnet, and
infers that changes In his magnetism
affect the magnetism OF the earth. u
ther, the sun and moon, by dragging the
atmosphere toward them as q earth
revolVes, may q that frlctlon etwee
air and earth, and also that evaporation,
which together may generate the supply
OF positive electricity IN the air and neg
alive In the earth. "Again," ne says,
these tides in the atmosphere will
cause the mass of it to lag behind the
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
An American Beauty.

One Of the most striking members of
the American colony in Paris is the
Countess de Trobriand, the wife of Gen.
eral de Trobriand, who won q distin-
guished repu' .tion in the Union army
during the cie1 war. The Countess de
Trobrland was o Miss Mary Jones, of
New York, the daughter of the founder
and President of the Chemical Bank.
Her salon in Paris has been for many
years the resort of distinguished Amerf-
cans, French, Russians, Germans and
italian Representatives of the literary,
artistic, and diplomatic world are to be
found always at her Monday receptions.
With the exception, perhaps, of Nine.
Edmond Adam, the Countess gathers
around her more people of distinction
than any other lady who receives in
Paris. Probably there is not another
apartment in Paris 80 filled with cur1osi-
ties from all parts of the world. The
salon is like fairy land. Filled with ex-
quisite Chinese cabinets, mirrors, chan
delier, clock and candlesticks of Dresden
china, ETC.. its walls inlaid with panels
of mother-of-pearl; sofas and chairs,
representing all periods, and covered
with the rarest embroideries and tapes
tries, it presents q tout ensemble at once
dazzling by its beauty and surprising
from its harmony. The other rooms are
equally beautiful-the dining-room with
chairs and table of m~arqueterie and
sideboards of same, cleaning with sill
yer, lighted by a superb carved brass
chandelier; the countess own room hung
with India shawls and furnished with
deliberately carved oak, and Japanese
toilet articles; the room of a favorite
daughter finished with rosewood and
gold satin, with amberglass toilet arti-
Giles; the boudoir hung with tapestry
framed in pink and gold, with Louis
Quinze chairs and consoles; every corner
of the department displaying artistic
treasures-an these are more beautiful
than words can tell. We must not for
get the ante-chamber, with its fireplace
and grand old andirons; the screen, six
feet high, which, unfolded, represents,
by six oil paintings, the early Kings OF
France; the superb mirrors in carved
frames; the Louis Quatorze chairs-but
words fail to give a description of all the
beauties of this marvellous house.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
TEXT OF THE MONROE DocrRns
See Monroe An..., a....se. D.es.sss -

Bee Monro Annual Messase. Deeenbe, u
with the governments which have
declared their Independence and main
tanned it, and whose Independence we
have, after great consideration and on
just principles, recognized, we could
not view any interposition for the pur-
pose of expressing them or controlling
in any manner their destiny by any Eu-
ropean power, in any other light than as
the manifestation of an unfriendly dis
position towards the United States"
It has been asserted that Huskisson,
Franklin's friend, wrote this declaration
and transmitted it, with the consent Of
Canning, his chief in the Cabinet, to j.
Q. Adams, who was Monroe's Secretary
of State.
The precise language, combining the
doctrine to the States recognized by the
United States, and excepting from it all
not free-including Canada, Cuba, in
deed the whole West Indies, Brazil,
Buenos Ayres favor this view. We do
not know whether it has eyer been de-
MED.
J. @. Adams did subsequently,, in a
special message to Congress, say:
"Most of the new American Republics
have declared their entire assent to them
1.-THE Monroe d~eclarations), and they now
propose, among the subjects Of consid-
Grafton at Panama, to take into consid-
Grafton the means of making efectual
the assertion Of that principle, as well as
the ean Of resisting interference from
abroad with the domestic concerns of
the American Governments"
The italics are in the message, and he
added subsequently,:
"The purpose of this Government is
to incur in none which would import
hostility to Europe, Or justly excite re-
| sentiment in any of her States.
"Our views extend no further than q
mutual pledge of the parties to the
| compact to maintain the principle in ap-
plication to its own territory, and to per-
| NIT no colonial Judgments OF. establish
ments of European jurisdiction upon its
own soil"
This may be called adams addition
to the Monroe doctrine, Clay being his
Secretary of State.
Adams addition, rather than Monroe's
verbiage, has remained in the popular
mind Is the Monroe doctrine ; and even
Congress, In including that of the Con-
federation at Richmond, 1861, has al
ways so treated ii.
The Panama Congress. called by Boil.
ivar, never adopted either Monroe's OF
Adams text. It indeed adjourned with.
out fairly considering the doctrines.
The members were, in fact, disappointed
that the United States had receded from
Monroe's declaration, and now proposed
"that each State should, for itself, On
its own soil, resist European interior.
ence."
They wanted an American Conredera.
ton organized for the purpose of driving
out European jurisdiction.
The project turned out to be impracti.
cal, and was dropped eve by South
Americana.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
RESCUED PROM DEATH.

William ]. Coughlin, of Someryille, Mass, says: ''In
the fall Of 1876 I was taken with bleedings Of the lungs,
followed by a severe cough. riost my appetite and
flesh, and was confined to my bed. In 1877 I was ad-
mitted to the hospital. The doctors said I had q hole in
my lung as big as half q dollar. Al one time q repor
went around that I was dead. I gave up hope, but a
friend told me of De. wnIIAN HAIL's BALsAM FOE THE
LUNGS. I got a bottle, when, to my surprise, I COM
menced to feel better, and to-day I feel better than for
three years past. I write this hoping every one afdicted
with diseased lungs will take De. WILLIAM HAMS BAL
sAn, and be convinced that cozsuMrrIos cAH BE CURED
I can positively say IL has done more good than all tn
other medicines I have taken since my sickness"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
Icincinnsti, Irish Citizsn.1
EUREKA!
Read and sads. for Yourself

As a general rule we do not pin our
faith to specific remedies; but there is
no excuse for skepticism in well developed
and authenticated facts. Since its intro
duction to the American public, the
great German Remedy, st. Jacobs Oil,
has advanced with more rapid strides in
the estimation of the public than any
thing of a similar character ever brought
into notice by the aid of extensive adver-
Using. We write this for the benefit Of
those who may be afflicted with the
divers ailments for which the oil is an
nounced as a specific remedy, and w are
induced to do this in consequence OF the
proof of its curative power brought to
our notice ; proof voluntarily and CRATE
fully brought by people who have tested
its merit and are anxious to acknowledge
the great benefit derived. In the emu
meration of such people it is necessary
to be specific, and to this end we have
obtained their permission to give their
names and addresses, in order that the
afflicted may have the advantage of q
personal interview OF postal correspond
ence, and in evidence that what we
write is a candid statement and not q
mere putting advertisement. MI. Frank
Letcher, of No. 1921 West Fifth Street,
assures us that for a series of years he
wal Frustrated with rheumatism until
life became emphatically a burden. He
had exhausted the advertised remedies,
and had lost all faith in the efficacy Of
anything to afford relief when a friend,
who had tested the virtue of the oil,
made him a present of q bottle, and, to
Franks wonder and delight, the first
application afforded sensible relief ; while
before the bottle was exhausted the pains
and aches had disappeared. He is a new
man, and q waking advertisement of
the infallibility of st. Jacobs Oil. Aloyus
Reidy, on the corner of Eastern Avenue
and Lewis Street, was afflicted for three
years in a similar manner, and is now
tinues the use of the oil. safh
g. O'Callahan, of III Sycamore
Street, is another grateful witness to the
infallible power OF the remedy, which,
he says, has made q new man OF him.
Thomas Lewis. of SO Butler Street. was
for seven years afflicted with that dread
full malady, Sciatica, and being induced
to try st. Jacobs Oil, found almost i'm
mediate relief therefrom, and is now
perfectly cured. He is prepared to SUBJ
| stantiate this statement under oath.
John Miller, of "a West Fifth Street,
was cured of a complicated case of rheu-
matism Of ten years standing, and George
Hollinger, who lives on the corner Of
| Terrence and Columbia Avenues, adds
his testimony to its efficacy, and has
assured us that his pains were relieved
as if by magic.
The above statements are by well
known and respectable citizens of Gin
| c%innati, and with all who know them will
carry conviction upon the face. Hence
it is we deem it a matter of duty to suf-
fering humanity to give them all the
| publicity in our power.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
Girls Ahshing.

ooh, I see. oneI"
"Where ?"
go, my, SO he is /"
"Let's catch him !"
"Who's got the bait?"
"You lazy thing, your sitting on my
pole"
"Oh, something's got my hookl"
"Pull up, you little IDIOT
"Oh, murder |! take it away. Ugh
take it away, the nasty thingr"
Chow will it ever get off 2"
CANT it pretty? Z"
wonder If it amt dry ?"
"Poor little thing! let's put it back
again !"
Glow will it get the hook from it's
mouth ?"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09

went out on the street and got Q couple
Of slices Of horse-bread. TWAS far more
acceptable to the party than the bread on
which we were being fed. Some of this
corn meal. too, finds its way into the
''black bread" fed TO the army. Soldiers
are everywhere present in Italy, and
every day detachments go along guard
ing great wagons pitched high with
these gloomy-looking ~loaves, covered
with dust and dirt, and seeming entirely
too filthy even for horses to eat. This u
the chief food for the army"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09

TEE editor of an exchange can't see
how the leg artists get on their tigets.
OF course not. They go in their dress
ing rooms and lock the doors, and stuff
rags in the chinks just to keep such
fellows as him from seeing how they get
On their tights, but anybody can SEQ
how he gets on his tights, by Just look
ing beyond the green Slated screen.
that stands Just inside of the first saloon
door.-W sscher.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09
In Other Words, 1t Don't Paw.

A New York street-car conductor hav-
ing spent nearly the whole of one day
arresting and prosecuting an evil boy
who threw a lump of Coal through the
car window, a philosophical comrade on
the same line observed: "Often dem
boys make dot foolishnesses. But I
bodders mot mineseluf NIT dot. Neffer I
gan see dot boy vat makes him. Vat for
shall I? Ven I see him, I lose me a
halluf a day, goin' by de COURT. De
company pays me noting for dot.
Maybe it vas bad for de passengers dot
their eyes got knock owit by dem boys,
but I don't can afford I bodder mineselluf
by dot"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1882-03-09

MENsMAN's peptonized beef tonic, the only
preparation of beef containing its entire nutri-
Hous properties. It contains blood-making,
force generating and hfe-sustaining properties /
invaluable for indigestion, dyspepsia, nervous
prostration, and all forms of general debility /;
also, in all enfeebled conditions, whether the
result Of exhaustion, nervous prostration, over
work or acute disease, particularly if resulting
from pulmonary complaints. Caswell, Hazard
&Co., proprietors, New York. Sold by druggists.