The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-06-13
FLEA BITES.

1
CONE, LET Us ALL SCRATCH.
| Patience to-night.-Potsiam, N. " Courier.
Yes, patience all the time and then you'll wish
you never saw your mo'her-in-law.
| Canton Is discussing .werage.-Postdam, N.
| " Courier.
Thirty years ago when Elias Page pastured his
sheep on the island and the bad boys Of she town
we're in the habit Of bathing from the head OF the
island and playing with the animals which ''wore
the horns" il then ia order for swerage. They
are Not agitating the question too
Six divorce petitions have been filed by one
/ attorney this week, all of Rich Hill,-G1zette.
Were any Of them brought about by the en-
postmistrvss of Bu,lers
The widow of Jesse James has signed contract
tn furnish few fact, from her husbands lif- 10 be
used in a lecture. She, with her boy WILL iii tn.
stage while the lecture Is being deiiverei-->tockon
Sialwart.
The last time she sit was At smiths hall this
city and il was a painful sight TO sit and see
tweniy-eight auditors who paid at the box Office.
calico dress, made skirt aud waist. and who.e
subject Geology Human Mature. '-Coni-
mcncemcnt exercises Reported in stockton stall
wart.
white swiss rouncr-i and irilIed ami have on al
least % y yards vi graduation ribbon.
Job is sail To have been very patient man.
Ex.
That is probably true ii he ran job printing
establishment in aiCwn where Cepha> hal lived
and left his example behind him.
Most every individual you run across i. a nat
ural h"ra ho>>. You can't plant : rD>e hU>h. hut
what some fellow Will lean over the fence and Iii
rect yoU how To do ii, il YOU want sure growth.
-Gri-gsvile Press
Yes, and tell You how to run a newspaper.
The Knights oi Honor lodges OF Pike county,
Illinois havea celebration Oh june D--t'Ilss>yle
Press
Guiteau has celebration AT Washington OF the
! same day and makes the opening sTseCh. The
! sheriff closes the argument.
Hang on to your winter clothes-MaysviIe
Register.
Yes, and to all the other kind you can get your
f"rceps ON, for, stranger. you'll nesi EN- before the
great fire is kindle,i.
Young man, If you want to become famous, get
drunk and raise thunder.-SaysvilIe Register.
Two young men in oedaiia got drunk and famous,
one i in-welli il makes no difference and the other
walks around town now afraid of his shadow.
We should like to 20 fishing once more 10 feel
the sensation of getting charlottesville Press.
That man who talks 50 hippantly OF "bites'' has
been a soldier. He knows what he Is talking
about.
When raiToaier gets divorce ne SAYS he has
broken his couplinc.-Parsons> sun.
But generally only To hitch on 10 new tracks and
take run.
-Jeweled carriers. worth from so" to IS OOn are
ecomins all the rage among the upper crust OF New
York.-Ex.
How do you know and which sex Is on the
rage
Once upon a time a woman died.-Ex.
Bless your ignorance The women of Sedalil dye
by the every week. and we think nothing OF
il.
DIR. Franklin's mother-in-law hesirated about
permitting her daughter 10 marry prn;er.-Ne1ico
Ledger.
The old woman afraid her daughter would be
'chaSea" around the house that her form
wsuld I've justified - that the old man would
want too many ''iake>' and that the copy OF
himself would come with painful regularity.
The greenback state convention refused TO de-
clare in iav'r OF prohihiri"n.-Moberly Monitor.
That because Pat Carmody prohibited H.
Martin Williams bringing any greenbaCk producers
into the Merchants hotel.
Mr.. Macy Yesterday morning discovered among
a brood Of ten chickens which irving To-
make its way into the world ~ best il cOli on
four legs and four winss--Jeterson City Tribune.
capital story but it won't keep the capital with
You. Some day you viii ind animal around
With seven-lesgue boots and he will just shoulder
the capital and march OF and deposit it in Sedalia
are still awaiting executive clemency--Ex.
II You will cut their tails of just behind the ears
they will stop awaiting" This reeeip, is given
gratis
Kansas City wants new hotel on an elaborate 4
scale. Here's chance Tor some 81. Louis belle TO /
rent out her slppers.-Chicazo Herald.
Yes and for the sweet Jefferson City ringers to /
turn their stOgas To proht.
Shall babies live Eek.
According 10 the Declaration of independence !
they are endowed with that right. George WASH
inston and Thomas Jefferson We're once babies !
Topsie, however, it will be recoIlected, never was
born.
jesse James promises to keep ST. Louis papers
in copy" until the next presidential election
Chicago Herald.
You are little 10 copy" Gus. What do people
who rest in Abraham's bosom care about the prin-
tiers devil
Two feminine homeopathic phy sicians have be-
gan to practice in ST. Louis, and there is reason
Why 81. Louis coroners should not get rich--N, Y
Truth.
When a woman will, she will you may depend
ont, but when she won't, she won't, and that's the
end ont. Still isn't il unfair to charge all opathic
effects to homeopathic eauses9
-Tecumseh Sherman is talked about by ST.
Louis bellies because he kissed q whole row of
zrown-up girls AZ n rpccpron Mark Twain Stossi