The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-05-23
FLEA BITES.
CONE.LEr US ALL SCRATCH.

ag
CONE, LEr US ALL SCRATCH
Doesn't co-.e a-Miss--a baby bOy.-Ex.
Yes it does too, mischief. but again il doesn't
t'ecome a''MiSs, looks better ''Mrs.'
The lilies Of the field have pstils-EN.
AID that the trouble with Me. Drarmou when
he >hot Thornton, he wa, .'arrayed lik. a lily
Striped parasols have taken the place OF striped
>>t"ckings.-Ex.
and now the next thing will be women carrying
striped stockings 10 keep of the sun. and wearin :
g,arasols their ie-gends. What connoiS,,s> Tia.
'.ioys'' will all get Ia be in paTasos i,c >;Isr.
Can love die? the title of a new poen.-Ex.
II cannot, oh no; but it gets dreadful sick some
times.
All the planets will be visible this month
,semember that boys show your best girl the
stars and teach her astronomy, never.
Bows on the shoes are fashionable.-Ex.
But when old Hardheart heard that item he
thought ii meant "beaux," and that night he
kicked Belinda's young man all the way from the
front parlOr into the street.
All the axes and tucksaws found in the ruins
Of POmpei are OF light make rs II constructed for
wOman's use."-Ex.
Those ancient old BOOSTERS were much wiser than
the men of the nineteenth century, they knew how
il wood be if beauty not utilized.
Don't be afraid TO praise your servants when
ibey deserve it."-Ex.
man living N fifth street read that and he
walked out 10 the kitchen and said Mary, You
ar. perfect little darling and he got that far
out was interrupted by his wife, and now there is
man in that domicile nursing head, and a
Kitchen mechanic hunting new place. so much
ior taking newspaper advice.
-Surpce waist with shirring below the bosom
are revived.-Ex.
That revival was probably b'Ougt about by sorue
preacher who loved nature unadored.
A tortoise was found i'm Elmira New York,
with the date "1stjs' cut on its back.-EX.
That tortoise can take back seat; q bed hug was
iolnd in Jefferson City the other day that bore the
legend ''G w.I776."
A Chinese adage: Love 100 little love Oolong-
Champaign Qllinois.) Times.
The young ladies in south Sedalia say Love T.
Hong"
der.-Ex.
But they never have been known to tie them
selves to death with strings, end hitched
10 the bed post aud the balance of the girls the
ted to keep from being pulled out OF the window.
-whi,elaw Reid and Murat Halstead are twisted
iInks OF the same Sausage.-Omaha Herald
Fiste dogs at that we reckon.
We can not tell lie.-Bob White, of the
Mexico Ledger.
Comment is unnecessary.
An Oscar Wilde" young lady appeared on the
hoor of the senate at the opening of the Dominion
parliament dressed in tight-ting velvet decorated
eith sun-howerS.-EX.
She had the aesthetic chang" with the usual far
away expression in her-eyes.
"A five-cent fare pays best.-Joe d. Sicher, Pres
ident Sedala Street Railway.
A free pass pays better TO the passenger.
The Courier-JournaI startIes the world with
the assertion that there is net a single editor in
Elorida.-EX.
We suppose they are all married
Miss Allie Barnhart is the latest victim Ia
numps.-Arcola( Ills. Record
She'll pull through ali right but the bows must
look out.
The Lincoln Illinois Journal has libel suit on
its hands, amounting to ZOO. They treat ii
happily though ii were G. COO worth of improve
ments in their Office Pekin Times.
That is nothing. The BAZOO can boast OF SIS 900
IA h'el suits. a ID One warrant out in ike county,
Illinois, for the charge of criminal libel
Happiness is no good name for the situation. We
never SO happy before since granny died
A Philadelphia magazine makes the statement
that marriage is on the decrease, and il predicts
that every twentieth girl of the next generation
will be obliged to live an old maid.
II any way can be invented to keep e. ID. Ellis
alive, there will be great heaven of untruth in
;hat prediction.
DR. Howe, who was great phrenoIogist, one
evening years ago. when PLAYING blind mans buff.
caught Miss Julia Ward. and when feeling of her
with his hand in order to ideptif his captive fell
an love with her bampS.-EX.
We never heard 'e,n called dumps before hut
many and many man has fallen in love that way.
A man in Berks County, Pa has worn pair
OF stockings constantly for thirteen years-Ex
Whew: Fumigate his feet; bury him; don't let
him escape.
-"Jeweled carriers all the rage."-Ex
Well, We do not know whether they are or not
The dazzling display of ankle saw so nearly put
our eyes out we forgot to notice the carriers.
When you see your wife begin to tramp around
the room ike Texas steer hitched 10 a sulky, YOU
may know that she is getting read for rehearsal
in order not to disturb her you generally meander
out of the back window.--Ex.
Yes, sir; distance lends enchantment about that
time.
"A New dance, which prOmires to ill long felt
want at summer resorts, during warm evenings has
gust been invented The couples have nothing 10
do but TO stand up and hug while the band plays
funeral dirge.-Ex.
That is all right; il is hardly TO be supposed
that the above paragrapher would want the couples
10 lie down and hug.