The Elk Mountain pilot., 1882-03-09

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By One wh. Saaous kiat he Fully DE-
seyves tie Title.
l am a small boy, and sometimes I
am bad boy. At least that is what
the folks tell me, and l suppose they
wouldn't tell a lie any more'n George
Washington. But what l want to ask
first, is why the editors don't say
something about Us boys once in
while, and say something good1
There's a religious paper comes to
our house, and it always says some
thing about sparing therod and spoil
ing the child, and just about that time
I'm sure to catch 1t. If some paper
would say that too much licking
spoiled boy, there'd be some sense
in it.
/ don't believe I've done great
many bad things. Let me see. I'm
twelve years old, and all I've done 50
far is to cut of my sister Sallie's curl,
put dinples in her big wax dolls
cheek with a red-hot poker, painted
my little brothers face with green
paint they were putting on the blinds,
sat down on the stoop as soon as it
was painted, stuck shoemaker's wax
on the school-mas.er's chair, "played
hockey" lots of times, cut the clothes
line to make swing ia the woods,
hid under the sofa till sister Mays
big beau got to huggin' her, and then
l had to laugh, put bull pup in the
minister's hat, tied Aunt James false
curls on the cats head, put box Of
pills in the soup to make it rich and
give 'em all the collie, dressed old
Towser up in mothers best bonnet,
painted the pictures in the big Bible
and made 'em ever SO much p!ettier,
made bonfire and burned a hay-rick
down, laned one Of the horses while
stealing ride Sunday afternoon, and
told old Mrs. Crimp-she's the richest
woman in town and fathers aunt
that father said he believed she meant
to live for ever, and never die and
leave him her money. That's all the
bad things l remember, and somehow
| can't forget them, because l got
particularly we'll thrashed each time.
What's boy to do, I'd like to
know, if he cannot have fun1 You
would have laughed ready to XIII
yourself if you had been to our house
the night l caught Bill Stiles hugging
sister May. You see, Bill came twice
a week, and then mother would hustle
US children out into the kitchen and
leave them the sittin.room to do their
sparkln' In. l didn't know what
sDarkin' was and was rather curious
about it, because when Bill was with
us he sat up as stiff as ramrod and as
red as beet and didn't say nothln'
to nobody, and Sis sat sewing, just
like a little sheep, and l thought it was
awful stupid.
So one night l said l gussed I'd 60
to bed, and l hid under the horsehair
sofa, nice and quiet, and nobody
know'd about it. Bimeby Bill and
May came in and sat down in two
chairs, and began to talk about the
weather, and then May said 1t was
chilly, and Bill he just hitched his
chair up closer and took hold Of one
hand and put his other arm around
her and asked her if she was warmer.
And then he kissed her. And then
she kissed him. And then l couldn't t
tell which one was kissing. ann guess
they both kissed toscincr.
After while May said she couldn't
get warm, nohow. So Bill sat down
in the rockingham and took May in
his lap, and she giggled and he gig
gled, and they did some more kissing.
The lamp was turned down low,
and l got so tired that l crawled out
presently and got under the rocking
chair and reached out and pinched
Nays leg. N.Y. How she did jump,
and she said:
civilian, how dare you?''
Bill said he didn't do nothing-no
more he didn't. 1t was me. He
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