Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-08-06
WIT AND HUMOR.

1. Is poor speiler who does not keep
an to business.
Inc man who missed his footing prob
ably had his boots stolen.
Mrs. Langtry is so beautiful that she,
is more than head and shoulders above
any adornments of dress.
IT'S probably true that the church is
the pewrest place on earth. since so
many OF the congregation sleep.
The cultured way to speak of a bur-
iesque actress dress is to say that the
skirts are very decollete at the bottom.
Every maiden can have Teller if she
has money 10 buy sewing machine
with all the modern attachments.
Old lady Ito modest Curate) -"Lor'.
sir, | do like to ear YOU preach extrum-i
perry Your language is that won erful
fluid. a
There is no place ike home,n re-
peated Mr.. Henpeck, looking at a mot
TO, and he heartily added: I'm Glad
there isn't.
The ancient maiden who defers her
proposition of marriage much LONGER
Will soon have Mr.. chances for this lean
year.
Women don't take to telegraphy very
much Lots of dispatches have to be
taken on manifold, and the sex don't
care for man if old
The woman who trims her own bon
net can always be picked out of a crowd
by other women; now if men only had
this peculiar gift of selection.
A dull old lady, being told that a GER
tain lawyer was lying at the point of
death, exclaimed; MY gracious, won't
even death stop that mans lying?"
Time, 2 a. M: MY DEAR said he.
IS all right. Eve been down getting
tn returns. There's no use You raisin'
row. faint my fault What you
want sh earlier returns?''
At Bullong-AIr Belleville Cwho likes
to air his French before his friends.)
"Avvyvoo la Parflme du-er-du Jock
ey club9' Fair perfumer-''O yes, sare!
We have all re English smells''
a child of 5 was being taken to a
party in a close carriage, and while
passing through plantation he sud-
denly exclaimed with great satisfaction:
Look! look! I'm going ont to tea; but
all the trees are going homer
Speaking of Mr.. Forbes lecture on
Kings | Have Met Western news
paper says that some day he will come
across three kings and pair of sevens,
and then he will learn something about
the really great resources of this coun-
try.
King Ludwig, of Bavaria, who in
council, sits, and makes his ministers
stand, often wakes his old chamberlain
at 3 o. clock in the morning 10 play bill
lizards, and if he dareS to yawn he is
soon made to feel the weight of the roy
al displeasure.
The other day mild little man, with
an invalid wife and seven children, won
a big black bear mt a rattle in Memphis.
The bear was rallied off because it ate
up its last owner, and the little man
who made the lucky throw is just wild
TO know what to do.
DR.. G.. is one of the most fervent
apostles of materialism. In recalling
certain souvenirs of his youth, he be-
gan an anecdote, in the most natural
tone in the world-"At the time was
in love with an agglomeration of mole
cules called Ernestine.
A woman who went to concert TO
hear a performer called Blind Tom
'play by ear" says she was swindled,
and wants the fraud exposed. She says
that, instead of playing by ear, he
played with his fingers, just like other
performers.
A wicked Connecticut man being re-
Gently taken ill, and believing he was
about to die. told neighbor that he felt
the deed of preparation Tor the next
world and would like 10 see some prop
er person in regard to it. Immediately
the friend sent for q fire insurance
agent.