The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1882-07-06
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A RrvERis always down in the mouth.
A cDER-pREss is sappiest when il is
at work.
IT is no use to attempt to put on style
unless you have good gait.
THE real issue at stake in Ill Govern.
ments is the issae of bonds.
81 AM dressed to kill, as the recruit
said when he had donned his uniform.
If Prometheus had been mp to snuff
he would have used a liver pad and
fooled the vulture. -......
"DoEs it pay to keep chickens"
asks correspondent OF course not,
you lunatic; it pays to sell 'em.
WHY may a tipay man fall into the
river with impunityp. Because he won't
drown as long as his head swims.
PRESIDENT ARTHUR was once school
master. Some Of the ofiiceholders are
ANXIOUS to know whether they are to be
"kept in" "a q
"RIoHEs have wings. % and they need
them to keep up with the man who has
started a daily paper to fill long-felt
want. And without their wings he gen.
orally gets clear out of sight Of them.
A NEwLY-MARRIED couple, riding in q
carriage, were overturned, whereupon a
standerby said ii was A shocking
sight" "Yes," said the gentleman,
"to see those just welded fall out so
soon" rs .....
AT the medical examination Chow
should you detect prussic acid among
other substances?" by breathing it, u
answers the candidate. eff I died i'm
mediately, should know prussic acid
was present.
EVE wasn't unhappy in the Garden Of
Eden because she had nothing to wear,
"because," she said, whats the good
of nice clothes, when there are no 9TH
err women to envy your" That's what
CALLED Eve.
THE gentleman who came to this
office to talk on the necessity of reform
and absent-mindedly carried off black
silk umbrella, in mistake for blue
Bingham one, will please call and correct
the erlor.-Phitadetphia Neaos.
A HUSBAND advertises thus: "My wife,
Maria, has strayed or been stolen. Who.
ever returns Ter will get his head broke
AS to trusting her, anybody can do so il
they see fit; for, as I never pay my OWE
debts, it's not likely I'll pay her'n."
DlckY had been silent during hi.
Thanksgiving dinner, but finally III
rested his fat elbows on the table, will
knife and fork upright in either hand
and gave great sigh and said, 81 wisl
turkeys could be made double-breasted.
''AH," said an Engishman the othe
day, Il belong to country upon which
the sun never SETS" "And J." said
Yankee, "belong to country of which
there can be no correct map-it grow
SO fast that surveyors can't keep III
with it,"
X, WITH his wife and friend, i
seated on the beach, when passing
gentleman bows to the friend. "Tha
is Monsieur R., he says, "the eminen
divorce lawyer, who has never lost
case" "Ah!" cried X. and his wife il
the same breath, present us !"
"WHo did the churning last week
asked Farmer Fouroclock. 81 did,
said Bill. "Then do it again this week,
said the old man; lone good churn de
serves another" Covert expressions Q
JOY by all Bills brothers and sisters
Burlington Ra,ok- Eye.
"AH," my SOD, this is commencement
week, is it p remarked q kind parent
"You graduate, do you not? Do yo'
get degree?" "Yes, sir, think SO
two or three degrees-below zero, wa
the enforced confession. "Cold day,
was the laconic response.
81 sEE," said young lady, "tha
some booksellers advertise blank dec
larations for sale. I wish I could &c
one" "Why?" asked her mother
because Mr.. G.. is too modest to as
me to marry him; and, perhaps, if
could fill up the blank declaration wit
the question, he 'w."'d sign it.$