Daily Republican., 1882-05-26
HUMOROUS DRIFlINGS.
The Comlcal Phases Of Life A
Sovereign Remedy for tho Blues.

HECLUNG TO HIS OLD COAT.
A good dea of amusement has beeI
caused in dry goods trade circles durins
the past few days by the leaking out o
a little story at the expense of two
young gentlemen who are widely anC
favorably known in the trade. The
father of these young men is promi
nent Market street merchant, noted fol
his large wealth, shrevd business abil
Iity and great economy, particularly II
the matter of wearing apparel.
The sons, who are models of elegance
and taste in dress, have for long time
borne particular antipathy to a certain
venerable coat which has clung to theil
respected parent for many years and
often tried by persuasion to induce him
to sell it to the rag man and buy new
one, buL the old gentleman $ reply was
"You poys shpend money enough for
clothes for enc family. Dis goat il
good enough for me-" At length, know
ing their fathers fondness for a
bargain, they thought of a ruse by
which to induce him to lay off the old
garment and get new one.
Taking coat which the father had
worn they took it to the tailor and in
structed him to take it as a pattern AZ
to size and lit to make the finest coat
he could. "We Vill," said one of
them, "get father down here on some
pretence or other and then you must
sell him that coat. No matter what he
offers you, you take it, and we will pay
you the balance" In due time the
sons received word that the coat was
tinished-price $50. The next morning
at break fast the eldest son casual y re-
marked "Father, you will be going
near the tailor's to-day, and | wish
you would stop in and tell him to be
sure to send home my new coat to-day,
for | have a party to attend to night. y
Every veil, my son, | will do 50, but
] don't see what you poys want with so
many goats.
The old gentleman delivered his mes
sage, and the tailor's opportunity
had come. lingering the venerable
garment he remarked, persuasively:
"You ought to have a new coat. 1t
is shame for a rich man like you to
wear such an old garment as that"
"Tank you very much, but dis goat
is good enough for me.
~ have got something" persisted
the tailor, "that l believe will fit you,
and it is the greatest bargain that you
ever heard Of made it tor customer
but it was misft The price Of the
coat" said the tailor, producing the
garment, sis $50, but it won't tit the
man l made it for, and III let you
have it Tor next to nothing. Try IL on"
The coat was tried on and proved
perfect fit.
"YOu'll never get such a bargain
again if you live a hundred years.
'aid the tailor.
"You may have that coat for forty
"Ill gift you twenty. Ave." said the
I'D merchant, who knew cloth when he
awit.
"Takei
Carrying his old coat in bundle,
he purchaser went out arrayed in the
|80 coat.
At supper that night he appeared in
he familiar old coat and in excellent
,ood humor. To his sons he said:
II made nice little thing to-day,
Ven vas at the tailor's l bought .
.oat--a nice fine goat"
The price vas $50, but I..got 1t for $50.
put 1t on and had not gone a square
,efore met friend. He noticed my
lew goat and shpoke about it, and
old him about how got 1t 30 shesp.
ie offered me SO for the goat and L
ook it-made s. in fife minutes"
"Yes" said the sons, doletully in cho- |
Us, "you've made five dollars and we
ave lost ftty-fve." Then they ex'
,lained.
my gracious! that is pad" said the
Id man, when he comprehended the
itlation "but let dis be lesson to
GU, my shildren. Never dry to de-
eive your fader.