The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-11-07

leave.
Important to Boarding-House
| Keepers.
Noah's Sunday Times.
The political editor was deep in tn.
mysteries of . leader Oh "W ho Shal
be Our Future Governor" when :
voice at his elbow called out:
81 just dropped ia to see you about
giving me . notice. Hope l'm no,
luterruptin: you"
The editor looked up and saw be
fore him = short, stout party in q
large, soft hat, lew cut vest, eutawsy
coat and very tight lavender trousers.
"Never mind the interruption,
said the editor. "What il the nature
Of your business
"Wsll. I'm just puttiog something
On the market that will srevolutlopize
medicine" said the visitor. "Its q
patent electric appetizer. ALI you've
got to do is to wear it on yeur stcn-
ach and you will At snce become 70
rxvonsus that your lsndiady will
tsubls yea up On year board inside Of
twe days"
II dent ose much Of . ksps.sa in
such IN invsstisa, said the sditsr.
But us aavs 'sn Of all grades If
strength said tn, visitsr. There's
cur dainty apostle appliance tAat
read,rs tie vesrer an spicurs, and
1harc's eur table &hSts pad that gives
t. wsaror al sppoti.s tor French
diaasrs, AID then We have heasly
end substantial pad th9t makes tho
ems uhs r-ars it lssg for rvast bssf,
soiied potatoes snd that sort Of thing.
You sec We are ready to suit all esc-
toners. Its tremeuaous discovery.
Why, if yeu suffer from dysPepsy. al
you have to DO is 70 clap On ere If our
digestive pads and ysu can just get
away with aOyshin. from home
made bakers pie to pair Of old boots.
See hsw Independent you are with one
Of our pads. You car pat up At Z
first rate clearinghouse and devOur
the ssle leather steak, vintage Of '48
spring chicken, india rubber pot-pie
crust and other horrere, with As keen
relish as you would 6 bang up dinner
at q heightened restaurant"
"You seem to have struck it right"
said the editor smiling.
"You just put up all you've got, /
have" said the visitor. "Now, sup
pose yeu are invited out to big din
ner to take place tomorrow night.
What will you do?"
GO by all means" said the editor.
as his eye frightened at the prospect.
'Of course you'd g" said the visit
or. when one o YOU newspaper
chaps throws a good dinner over his
shoulder the world'il stand still. para
lyzed with astonishment. But what
would you do between now and to-
morrow night? I've been there N.Y.
self. You'd just eat as little as posi-
bic, SOS to be prepared for the big
feed. and get yourself as empty asa
beer key 1T Eve o'clock in the morn
ing. Then you'd pitch in and stuff
yourself full and spoil your digestion,
and mix ysur iasards up generally"
"Dsn't you think you're growing |
rather psrsoaal?" asked the editor.
me, l mean it to apply generally" |
esia the visitor. 'Nsw, suppose you |
have one Of ny dssbl>ps~sr elssfric
Where are you then?
Isdspsndsat, SIR. Eat al you like
until the hour before you 60 to the
dinner, then clap on the pad, and
youth become - hungry you'll pay
the hackma. double fare to get you to
the feed On tine"
can astonishing invention" said
the editor, with another doubtful
smile.
"Well. 1 should sayit was.' said
the visitor, warming up. And
have trunk full Of testimonials to
back all / say. Why. there's one
party who was 50 thin from loss of
appetite before he used our pads
he had IN offer from the same
to enter the profession ~
, living skeleton. That's our boss
concluded the visitor
81 belive you" said the editor.
"Now you crack me in . good
appetite. and never suffer from
dyspepsia" said the editor.
Gust slap her in COR the sake of
humanity. Dlsinterestedly. a. it
Why Should They?
No man or woman can do satisfactory
Tork when the brain is dull, the nerve IN
tesdy, the system relaxed and they feel