Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-10-12
Advice to a Young Man.

And, while you avoid offensive blunt
ness, my boy. it is well to cultivate a
habit of franknesS. Be straightforward
When you sse anything YOU want. ask
for it like man. If you want to bor-
row i've dollars of a man. or If vou only
want to marry his daughter-it amounts
to the same thing. in the end-6on,t
sidle up to him and hang on to YOUR hat
and talk politics and religion and wealth
er; don't tell old, stale stories whereof
you have forgotten the point, and fat.
Improbable jokes that never had any.
until you worry the poor old man into a
fit OF nervous irritation. Go at him with
atull head OF steam on and YOUR bow
ports open, like gunboat pulling for a
shore battery. Snort and paw, if YOU
feel like 1t, no matter if it does astonish
him. Better to astonish man any time
than bore him. Make dash at his af.
feetions or his pocketbook, or both, like
abrindle bull, with curl in his fore
head, head set, eyes on fire, tail up and
the dust a-f1ying. Then you'll fetch him.
Or, possibly, he may fetch YOU. But
never mind, you'll accomplish some
thing, and you'll show him that YOU
have something to say and are not
afraid to say it, and say it in plain United
States. - -.
And take off your coat early in the
fight, my son. Don't be afraid of hard
work. 1t can't hurt you. Ten O'Clock
isn't too late to knock off, and five
o'clock doesn't come SO very early in the
morning, to a young man. 1t doesn't
come so early as three, by two hours.
and yet how often do you 90 to bed at
three? No? I'm glad to hear YOU saw
it, because, while three O'Clock is a
very early hour at which to rise. it is
paradoxically a very late hour at
which to 60 to bed. In order
to be up with the lark in the morn
ing, Telemachus, it isn't at all neces-
sary to sit up with him all night. But if
you are at work, the midnight oil won't
hurt you. 1t will do you good, because
the hard workers are long livers. You'll
never work yourself to death, my bov.
Now. there's your sister; she is more
liable to over-work herself than any man
you ever knew. l believe the ceaseless,
monotonous round of old Euryclea's
household duties and domestic cares, or
young Nausicaa's worry over the family
laundry, would kill the oldest man in
America in week. 1t is true that wo-
mans work goes on forever, but then,
bless your soul, fair Hermione, don't let
that worry you. You don't 90 on for
ever to do it all. And you don't have
sill of it to do, even while you live.
Mans work goes on forever, too; and
Pm glad of it. But I'm not going to
stay here to do it all, and shan't do
any more of my own, while 1 do stay,
than have to. Don't fret because wo-
mans work goes on forever. You will
have shirts to make and socks to darn
for Neoptoelmus not more than fifty or
sixty years, anyhow. And as for you,
Telemachus, it isn't hard work that de-
stroys young men; it's the intervals that
kill. It's the relaxation that hurts.
Some time you may wake in the morn
ing with the worst head upon you that
ever made you sigh for death. And you
weren't sitting up at work until 200 a.
m, either. You will know there isn't a
line of Virgil or unit of mathematics,
or one stroke of honest hard work in
that headache that is going to throw
one more wasted day into your bright
young life. If you had burned the mid
night oil over the workbench, at the
forge or on the desk or at the lathe, it
would never have manufactured such
headache as that. 1t might, and it
would send you to bed, tired as a shad-
ow of death, but you would open your
eyes next morning on an honest world
Of hope and sunshine and manly ambi-
ton, without blush of shame in all its
radiance. You'll never work yourself
to death, my boy. The harder you
work, the less mischief and trouble you
will get into.-Burli'sgto Hackeye.