The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1882-08-31
ToBEY,S FORTuNE.

IN the pain OF HDObn armies, so TnaG It's
war record soon became of the most
exciting nature. But none had an ex-
perience to be ment:oned in the same
breath with Tobey. who had fortune
in his grasp and never knew i'll 1t is
too outrageous for belief, but it Is liter
ally true, and this is how it happened:
It was the twentieth of December
"the glorious, glorious twentieth the
people of Holly Springs call it to this
day. Tobey, whose other name was
Kinkle, was awakened early in the
morning by the sound of firing.
"Git up, pappyr' he called excitedly,
"don't you hear de shootin' ?''
Uncle Jim Kinkle, who was snoring
comfortably in one corner of the cabin,
under a great pile of dingy quilts and
spreads, was slow in coming to the sur
face.
What's de matter, Tobe?'' he
growled in sleepy tones.
"Fightin's de matter" shouted Tobey,
hopping up and down. Don't you
hear dc guns? Come out to de mound,
an wake up nanny, so she kin come,
too.
He was of with these last words, and
Uncle Jim, now fairly aroused, jumped
up and jumped into his clothes in about
the length of time it was said to take
the wife of Billy boy to make
cherry pie.
Then he dashed out, head in front, as
bull charges. He was soon with Tobey
on the top of an old mound, from which
there was good view.
Great gran daddy!n cried Uncle
Jim, as he looked g Jerusalem crielI-
cts! PhariOh an all his hostsp'
A vigorous light was going on; the
sharp crack Of rides and occasional yells
We're borne distinctly to their ears.
Suddenly a ringing cheer burst from
thousand throats; mounted squad tore
like whirlwind across the field, with
another in hot pursuit.
(Which is runnin' TObey,n cried
Uncle Jim. my eyes is gittin' ole. 1
can't tell tudder from which,
"Hooray fur de Ragged Rebsp'
shrieked his offspring. "De Yanks is
giittin' over de groun' like skeered rab-
bits. Wh00Peet amt dis a sightP
BY this time Aunt Betsey had wad-
died to the mound.
Is de worl' comm to an end?' she
asked, putting between her words like
an engine.
NO, mammy,'' said Tobey, "de
wOrl' amt comm to an end; but de
Feds is whipped out, sho's you bawn.''
Look at yo' daddy, Tobe," said
Aunt Betsey; "what in de Lam is he
dom Pr
Sure enough, what i0as he doing? He
had stepped behind magnolia tree
growing on top of the mound and had
turned his trousers wrong side out. See
ing this a ray of comprehension lighted
Aunt Betsey's face.
$50 long wild you, nigger! Nobody's
gwine ter notice an ole ijiOt like you"
81 eafH with eFrob laurb made ba1.
shake like bowl of calf-foot jelly.
1t must be explained that some days
back one of the soldiers had given Uncle
Jim pair of blue brooches, and he had
worn them proudly. But, like the Vicar
of Bray, Mr., Kinkle had no particular
principles, and meant to keep on good
terms with both sides. To-day the boys
in gray had the victory, and should he
stand confessed partisan of the Union,
betrayed by his breechesP Perish the
thought! He could not change them,
however, for in Aunt Betsey's creed no
man needed more than one pair at n
time, andno sooner had her husband
donned the blues than she cut down his
old ones and put them on the growing
Tobey Uncle Jim, however, was a
man for emergencies A born turn
coat. he readily understood how to turn
trousers as wen, and when he stepped
from behind the tree it was with snowy
legs and a face beaIning with rebel en-
thuSiaSm. M
I'm gwine to town, he remarked
Don'tyou go rom' whar de fightin
is" said AuntBetsey. you'll gitkilled
fust thing you know"
Il reckon de fightin' is about over,
ole 'ooman. We have whipped out de
intruders on our sile befo' sun-up," said
Uncle Jim, with dignity.
"Well, youth want some breakfas' be-
70 you git OFF,
No" smiling mysteriously. 81
spec l kin Git better in town dan what
you could give mo. -
Z" Kin l go wild you, pappyP' asked
lobe
Eyes, chile. reckon you won't new
er learn no Younger -
Aunt Betsy, as is the lot of women,
had to stay at home. She fried some
bacon and roasted an ash cake, and ate
her breakfast placidly. Then she beat
up her feather bed and MIXED the cow
and tied the calf; a ter which she wad-
died again TO the mound. Seeing Moth
inc, she leaned her broad back against
the magnolia tree, shut her eyes, and
placidly went to sleep.
Suddenly she walked with a start.
The atmosphere was heavy. In the dis
lance flames were mounting to the sky
Then n terrible explosion that seemed
to make the very earth CULVER threw
her TO the ground. Others followed;
the glass in her cabin windows broke
into bits; smell of sulphur tainted the
air.
Now, Aunt Betsey knet0 the world
was coming to an endl Falling on her
knees, she prayed fervently that Tobey
and Jim and herself, and ''ole Mars
an ole Mis- an de chillen an Mars
Abram Lincoln an jeff Davis an all
good Christians and miserable sinners
might be brought inter de fold. " And
she was still pouring forth this ALIEN
bracing prayer. when night came bring
ing son and husband home.
Their day had been very eventful.
They had found the town in an uproar.
A certain wild young cavalry officer,
with name like that of novel hero
Earle Van Dorn-had galloped into
Holly Springs with his reckless brigade,
before the soldiers in camp were awake,
to their utter confusion and overthrow.
Not much blood had been shed, but all
the Federals were captured, disarmed
20 and released on parole. Holly Springs
tho pretty little town-was out of its
wits with JOY. Handkerchiefs and tiny
fags-starPed and barred-waved from
every window. Houses were thrown
open TO chance guests in gray. and as
few had time to enter, the gateways
were crowded with children. Matrons