The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1882-07-22
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS

Has it ever occurred to baseball
men that milk pitcher is generallya
good fly catcher?
-''Ma, will my little brother always
be younger than amp Eyes, dar.
ling" ''That'l be nice" "Why,
lovey?" because, then can always
lick himn'
Josh Billings remarks in his philS-
ophizings: "a reputation once broken
may possibly be repaired, but the world
will always keep their eyes on the spot
where the krack wuss."
And what shall say more?' VSsa
the clergyman after an hours holding
forth. And it was noticed that every
mouth in the congregation instncdyey
formed itself into the word Amen
N. Y. Graphic.
Letter from well-beloved young
French lady to her lover: FINALLY, my
ownest own, understand that love you
more for your defects than your moral
qualities, and thus judge of the bound
lessness of my love for you"
"A German shoemaker, having made
a pair of boots for gentleman of whose
financial integrity he had considerable
doubt, made the following reply to him
when he called for the articles; ''Der
poots ish not quite done, but der beel ish
made out." IN Y. Post.
Whenever the editor of the Cincin-
natl Enquirer feels like investing in
mining stock he walks himself down into
the press-room and lets one of the boys
feed him through and fold him up and
deliver the remains to his Borrowing
family in coffee-sack.-DetroI Free
Press.
"a Mobile man is afflicted with GIL
boils." 1t is now in order for the pun
ming tiend to remark that there is no
room on him for any Mbiles. If we
didn't detest puns, we might make the
remark ourself. Besides, it is not pro-
nounced that way.-Norristo,Dn Herald
The Lowell Courier states that ut
turns out that the singer engaged to take
Conly's place in the opera company has
voice like bell, not like bull, as
nearly all the papers have printed it. y"
We should have liked to see the menag-
erie in the Courier office when the gen
tleman called to request a correction
We always enjoy athletic exhibitions
Boston Post.
"A medical man in New Orleans, who
is fond of his little joke, called on a col
ored minister and began to catechse
him, "Why is it," said he, z" that You
are not able to doNthe miracles that the
Apostles didP They We're protected
against all poisons and all kinds of per-
lis. How is it you are not protected now
in the same way?" The colored preach
er responded promptly: " Don't know
about that, Doctor. 'spect is I've
taken mighty sight of strong medicine
from you, Doctor, and is alive yet
The man of medicine had no more ques'
tons to ask Y Picdyat,se. rr
Twas Sunday evening-Sunday
evening in June, when the sky was soft
and the breeze bahny. They two-the
same two that have sat in each other
presence 10! these ages-sat in the parlor
by the open window in that dreamy
listless state that precurses something
important. Jane" said he, dropping
the diminutive " Jennie in order to be
more impressive, "Jane, it is about
time that young man like myself was
thinking about-about settling down
for lie" Eyes, George, yes" and she
leaned little toward his shoulder,
" Could [ depend on you? That is, will
you bemineP' "I-can tell you to-
hight, George. Some time in the i!l'
Il re" " But I'm not speculatmglh
futures now, Jane" This little modern,
ism thrown in carelessly, as it were, had
the desired effect, and they will 90 10
Saratoga about the last of the season =
Chicago Times.