Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1882-02-16
MORSELS OF MIRTH.

keeps ont of.
A watering place-A horse trough by
the roadside.
GLOW does this strike you?" asked the
lighting of the barn.
The most discouraging fact about wo-
men is woman herself.
Reversible cuffs-Boxing one ear and
turning the other also.
A muzzle over dogs mouth acts as
Suspenders to his pants.
Memphis cotton men are carrying $5,-
600, 10000 in cotton bales.
1t does not follow that the man who
has no front teeth is a back bitter.
Notwithstanding the mild weather, cats
are till wearing their fur OvercoatS.
| Mr.. Boston is living in st. Louis. An
exchange says Mrs. B. calls him chubby"
care you wall flower?" he asked :;
''No, | am wall, sir'' Then they
waltzcd.
1t may be modest to take back seat,
but don't let the owner of the chairs catch
you at it.
Marriage, says Blackstone, is civil
contract. Very civil before marriage
but afterward?
| No lady with any refinement will use
her husbands meerschaum pipe to drive
nails in the wall.
The burglar who undertook to break
into hearty laugh the -other night was
taken in charge by policeman.
Teacher to a small boy: "What does
the proverb say about those who live in
glass houSeS?" Small boy: "Pull down
| the blinds.'
think of studying the frescoing on the
ceiling until the collection plate is being
passed around.
Thirty BoStonians have written essays
which are sealed up in Il box for a hundred
years. This would he Il good scheme for
newspaper poets.
An exchange adyertiSeS for Il dog, be-
| longing to Il lady with short ears, stubby
tail, white ring around neck, one white
foot and very fat.
John Stairs eloped with neighbor's
wife the other day. This is nothing
strange, a> flights of stairs are by no
means uncommon
1t is almost Impossible to look over the
hats Worn by ladies at the theater, and
this fact is but another argument for the
fcIcvation of the stage
\ st. Joe man has just found his sister
from whom he has been separated fifty
years. She was the cook in his boarding
house, and he recognized her style oI
hash.
4 newspaper editor was mistaken by ;
prominent Brooklyn man for Il preacher
the other day. This should teach editors
not be flirting with every woman the,
meet.
JoneS-''I see Smith has taken to ridin.
Il hycicle. What on earth is he doing tha
for:" Robinson-''o, very simple rca
Son-to prevent Mrs Smith from goin:
with him.
. If Noah had forcsecn the future ant
killed the two mosquitoes which tool
refuge in the ark, he would have-rcndcre'
some of the strongest words i'll the Eng
liSh language unnecessary.
Il should like to see somebody alaiuC
l me-" said Mrs Smith at the brcakfa>
= table the other morning. "lI'm, ;
, should |, my dear, so should l." sal
, Mr. Smith with exceeding earncStncss.
$ At a recent butter makers cOnvcntio
one Of the delegates got tired of the pro
. cecdmg> and MalLel - .r.A- home, hu
didn't know how to wind up the meeting
tc ought to have made a motion to
: churn.
\ medical certificate is among the treas
l urcS of the London General PoStolIice
= worded as follows: This is to ccrtif
that | attended MrS.- in her last ill
, ness, and that She died i'll consequence
thereof"
q A man in Council Bluffs ordered sui
- 8
be done on Friday When he called fo
! them they We're finished and done up in
G neat package. The mans hair turne
t suddenly white.
The Syracuse HeroH published stor
c entitled, "a Peculiar Position" but W
. didn't read it to see whether the hero Ii,
+ the trick of going to sleep with the hi
toe of his left foot in his mouth, or VIII;
it was that gave it the title
: \ North Carolina justice of the pcac
recently married Il couple as he sat el
- throncd in state on the back of Il mul,
II and the animal for once realized til;
i there was IL bigger trouble going on tina
O he could produce, and kept his heels still
\ miller in Peru, Indiana, fell asleep
J. his mill and bent forward until his ha
f got caught in some machinery and W:
yanked out, and, of course it awakent
him, and his first bewildercd cNclamatic
y was: ''Durn it. wife what's the matt,
{ ROW."
They searched the school children
I Defiance, Ohio, to find Il dirk alleged
l. be in possession of one of the boys, III
d the result was the discovery of twcnt,
= six pistols and revolvers. We believe
n is the work of educators to teach Il
young ideas how to shoot.
= They had brass band in attendance
Il Colorado lynching lately, but the hel
" of the occasion trapped the lynchers in
e agreeing to grant him one last reques
n and then asked that the band be not a
q lowed to play until he was hung.
# made the band feel awfully embarrasse
"Silence is golden," read Copperfiel
= "Strikes my case precisely" said h
"IIere have owed for that paper the:
sixteen years, l know and must confes:
III but if silence is golden, and my speakiI
to the book-keeper about it is greenback