The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-07-15
VERY FUNNY

Galveston bar.
The following is portion Of the humor-
Gus ST ell made by Sunset Cox in congress
the OF ~ day in answer to Horr's speech
in favor of The appropriation for the Mis-
sissippi:
deny it. Public opinion condemns all
these schemes made up in this peculiar
way. have proofs before me that your
bill is scandious in the popular eye and
thought. Some people go so far-I cannot
as to call it log-rolling. l will not call it
by such an odious epithet; do not know
what it means; never did roll logs. One
thing will say; it looks very much hike a
combination of very clever men getting to-
gether to get two-thirds of this work to
help themselves or their localities at the
general expense. They are entitled to
credit for their local craft they will get
credit for it at home. Let them have the
credit; / desire none of it my constitu.
ents approve me for opposing such bills.
They will probably come back re elected
some of them, especially If the contractors
happen to be friends of theirs. They will
come back here without any trouble. be-
cayse they will get their bill through with.
ont any trouble after having given some
thing or enough outside to nearly every
one so as to make success. They catch am
bilious members in this way it is the
honey il catches flies good thing some
times but who wants honey full of flies, or
who would be fly sacrificed even in pot
of honey?
wish knew what log,rolling meant.
was raised out west; | have been to q
raising" myself; but log.rolling is an art
above my reach in my politics.
A friend OF mine sang me in the cloak
room the other day this lyric illustration of
lOg-rollins. | am tempted to give it. 1t is
the song OF an old negro at a faro bank.
hope the committee will not take any Of
Tense at my reciting it. 1t is not my Ian.
guage. Do not take it down. 1t belongs
to one of our cOlored brethren. Sam John
son was fighting faro and there was some
thing wrong at the game. He broke forth
in this poetic language;
Ole Sam Johnson am my name,
lfyOu don't give me tome of dat, I'll break up
your camel
To which the dealer replied in the same
sort Of strain
You stop dat singing de dam old song,
Gou are declared in from dis time on
! do not make the charge suggested by
Mr.. Johnson and his friends. 1t is made
by a colored brother.
| do not see the gentleman from Michi-
gan here. | would like too see him. |
think he embraced too much in his speech.
1t is pretty hard to hold it, when you un-
dertake to embrace so much in one speech.
1t is like the man who tried to carry his
large, fat wife across muddy street, He
set her down right in the middle of the
mud, as he said to get a better hold of her.
A man who like my friend from Michigan
undertakes to bring into single speech the
mail-carrier going into the little mountains
on rivulet with appropriations, with his
messages of joy, and love, and peace u
woman and child, and also undertakes tC
run the slit in the Mississippi river Oh
moral. hydrostatic principles, embraces toe
much.
MIR. Chairman. | have looked over this
Dill and have failed to md one favorite
stream. do not mesu the kiskimnetas;
that is gone to the "rearward and abyss o
time" pine tor my iavorite. Other
streams also that used to be in those bill,
are gone. repne. | do heartily com
mend my friend from California that he ha,
bya provision at the end Of this bill under
taken to stop some OF these ridiculous sur
yeys, which ripened into such wasteiul
L
speech he reprobated the surveys of those
little streams in the mountains where the
mail.carrier and the appropriations for the
rllls bear peace, joy and love, making life
endurable
But one stream, Of unpronouncable de
light, have failed to find in this bill. Il
touches my heart with peculiar tenderness
1t deserves an appropriation. | have som,
poetry about it. If the gentleman from
Michigan were here | would make hin
sing it. II speaks Of messages OF love ant
Joy and sorrow. want the clerk to reaC
it, il he can. | think my friend, Judg
Holman, when he hears this song vii
move to amend the bill by putting thi
stream in.
The clerk read as follows:
THE sKooDoowoDsKooK.
0 maid with the hair that Is yellow.
'Tis time that the home You forsook:
Come over aud live with fellow
by the beautiful SkoodooWobskook
And there where the grasses the brooks kiss,
In the pretliest kind OF a nook.
Where the switt-runuing skoodoowobskooksis
POurs into the SkOOdoOwobskook,
III.
Our lives like their streams shall commlngle
For heaven no further we'll look;
Then come-it is wrong TO live single
u come To the SkOOdOOwObskoOk
".
In this lovely terrestrial Eden
I'll teach YOU to fish with a hook
The fishes are plenty, Omaden,
In the crystalline Skoodoowobskook,
V.
Our food shall be trout from the waters,
Which You 10 your sweet taste shall cook
Come. fairest Of Uncle Sans daughters,
To the banks of the SkOOdOowobSkook.
Mr.. Cox, OF New York: am glad tina
Dr. Mehailey, our clerk. has such a fine ~
probation of poetry. He not only reads
with credit TO himself but honor to tl
house and committee. | fail to find tina
stream in this bill. 1t is an outrage on I'll
Skoodoowobskook. Ii is an outrage on til
state of Maine, where | surmise 1t is situi
ted. The gentleman from Maine who hoi
ors me with his attention. (Mr. Dingley
ieels 1t enter his very heart.
want 1t understood that while this hi
includes many little inlets aud push. pol
creeks, and oyster bays, and fishing cove
Along the coasts from the state of Main
down all through, including New York an
North Carolina, | fail TO lind the Skoodo,
WOODSTOCK. Only give this 5000 or $500
anu she will become feeder. Asa feedC
sue Will furnish water for river, whiC
Will IN time feed u larger stream. Thus "
snail be able TO send by our appropriate
messages otloy aud love and glainess al
sorrow up into the hills, which, us Il habit
Ton Tor man, are thus made enc urable.
MORALITY AND HYDRosTLTICs.