davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1882-11-22

"A rich merchant of Matamoras,
Mexico, some little time sgo received
threatening anonymous notice to
place 5000 at a spot near his house.. On
applying to the authorities he was told
to do as requested in the letter and a
troop of soldiers would be sent to
watch the money. His servants slowed
the 5000 in the designated place. and
returning cautiously to watch further
proceedings. were shot dead by the
soldiers, whom they found in the act
of dividing the money.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1882-11-22

They were eating dinner and she
asked him how he liked the blanc mango.
" II tastes Of the chimney" he said.
"Then IL ought to SCOT YOU" was her
answer. |" / will try TO swallow it," he
rejoined, having the last word as usual.
Detroit Post
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1882-11-22
TO CONSERVATIVES.

The advertiser having been permanently cured
that dread disease, consumption, by simple rene
dy is anxious TO make known TO his fellow sufferers
the means of euro. To all who desire IT, he Will send
u copy of the prescription used, free OF charged
with the directions for preparing and using the same
which they will find sure cure for coughs and
colds, consumption, asthma, bronchitis, &c.
Parties wishing the prescription will please nd-
dress, Rev. Il. A. WILSON, 1911 Penn. St., Will
liamsburgh, Ny. 5i9yl
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1882-11-22

The largest belt ever made from a
single width of hide is said to have re-
Gently been made at Hartford, Conn.,,
Tor New York Touring mill. It is
vorty-eight inches wide, seventy-six
feet long, and weighs one thousand
pounds.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1882-11-22

The philosopher who discovered
that an obedience to the golden rule
was the cause of the negro's fondnsss
tfor the whitewashing business may,
perhaps, be able to tell why the Chinese
iaundryman invariably has red sign
with white letters. - Chicago Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1882-11-22

Sitting Bulls whisky ration of Q
oint per day is only just enough to
hckle his throat. He can drink two
Quarts and not stutter. Free
Press.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
we must graft him to a hub all the

we must graft him to hub all the
same.
It happened, however, that this
tall ungainly old miner who had I'M
dertaken the defence was an old
Methodist camp-meeting revival
preacher, and although he began
very quietly, cautiously treading on
the dangerous ground of talking in
the prisoners defence, the first thing
that judge, jury and spectators
knew, he had got warmed up to his
old work and although he had the
sing-song style of delivery Of those
old reyiyalists, his words rang out
with all the thrilling eloqnence of
Clay and the fervid, devotional ora
tory of a Wesley or a Bascom. One
by one the human icicles began to
melt around him; one by one they
began to turn back on their early
lives, to their old homes, their fa-
ther, mother, brothers, and sisters,
the old church and Sunday school,
and each tender influence. Many a
one of them was carried back by that
peculiar voice and style to his old
camp-meeting days. 1t was no long
err mining camp; it was no longer
a court room, no longer trial it
was a camp meeting, and the old
preacher was leading them by still
waters; he was reaching down and
lifting them up out of the mire and
clay; and when he closed and sol
EMMY said: "Let us pray for the
soul Of the man whom we that are
innocent are going to slay,n there
was not a dry eye in the court room,
the writer's included. And that
prayer! who can repeat or describe
it's ferTeat words for the soul going
to it's maker, for the wife and chill
dren waiting in their distant home
with love and hope and tremulous
expectation for him who would never
return, listening to every footstep,
responding to every sound9
Never before or since has there
been such trial and such a defence
in the mines of California. The
judge, jury and audience rose to a
man and cleared the prisoner They
did more; they made up purse and
sent the poor fellow home to his wife
and children, and he did just what
he intended to do-returned the
money to them in six months after
his arrival at home.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
MARTlNSBURG GREENHOUSE
FINE CUT FLOWERS,
PILES! PILES! PILES!

A Sure Cure Found at Last No One
Need Suffer A sure Cure for Blind,
Bleeding, Itching and liberated Piles has
been discovered by. Doctor William
IAN Indian remedy, called DIR. William s
Indian Ointment. A single box has cured
the worst chronic cases of 25 or 80 years
standing. No one need suffer five minutes
after applying this wonderful soothing
medicine. Lotions, instruments & eIe, u
ari do more harm than good. William s
Oj ltment absorbs the tumors, allays the
intense itching, particularly at night after
getting warm in bed, acts as poultice,
gives instant and painless relief, and is
prepared only for Piles, for nothing else.
Read what the Hon. j. NJ. Coffinberry
of Cleveland says about DIR. William s
Indian Pile Ointment have used scores
of Pile Cures, and it affords me pleasure
to say that / have never found anything
which gave such immediate and perma-
nent relief as DR.. William g Indian Oint-
ment. For sale by all druggists or mailed
on receipt of price Sl.00
HENRY d CO., Prop RS,
60 Vesey 81 rect, New York City.
hs- For sale at Williams drug store.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

And when the stranger went away,
after his conversation with his table
companion, he had no idea that it
was what some folks might have call
ed ghost with which he had been
talking.
At eight O'Clock that night, as
BERTHE Severn poured her husbands
tea in their snug, homely dining room,
Uncle Daniel walked in large as
life, while Vivian sprang to his feet,
bewildered and little startled, and
BERTHE rushed to his side.
"Don't be scared, it's me. 1 was
not dead at all. I'd like a cup of
good hot tea, my dear, with plenty
of cream and sugar and while Pm
warming up over it I'll just explain,
Vivian, that it has all been q strata
gem of mine to discover if the little
girl was a genuine diamond or spark
ling paste. And my dear-you'll
do. The charitable institution may
go to the =. You and Vivian are
to have my money and we'll go
tomorrow and buy the handsomest
house on the avenue, and everything
to correspond. Kiss me, child WV
ian, don't act like a fool over mew
And by that token Vivian was
convinced that it really was the 81
mon-pure Uncle Daniel; and a mer-
rier trio never sat down at a dinner
table. fea 'q q .R,
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
LODGES.


Palestine Commandery No. Q, meets list
Monday night in each month, in Grant
ham Hall.
Lebanon R. A. C. No. Q, meets 3rd Mon
day each month. in Masonic Hall.
Robert White Lodge, A. F. & A. NJ. I,
No 81, meets Cd and 4th Mondays of each
month, in Grantham Hall.
Equality Lodge, No. A, A. F. & A. NJ,
meets End and 9TH Saturday evenings of
each month, in Masonic Hail.
Valley Lodge No. 602, X. of H., meets
Sd and 9Th Friday nights each month, in
Pythisn Hall.
Lincoln Post, No. 1, G. A. R., meets
every Thursday night, in Scheu s Hail.
Berkeley Council, A. L. H., meets
1st and 3rd Monday of each month, in
Scheu s Hall.
Key Council Royal Arcsnum, meets LIST
and 3rd Friday each month, in Scheu S
Hsn.
Washington Lodge No. /, K. of P,
NESTS each Tuesday night, in Castle Hall.
Tuscarora Lodge, No. "a. l. o. o. F.,
meets every Saturday night, in Odd Eel
lows Hall.
Horob Encampment, No ~, meets snd
and 4th Tuesday in Odd Fellows Hall.
Bethany Lodge, No. Z, D. of R., meets
lat and Sd Tuesday of each month, in Odd
Follows Hall.
Hori Gori Society meets 1st Monday
of each month, at residence of Philip
Bush.
Local Branch No. 80, Order of Iron
Hall, meets I'd and 18th Thursdays, in
Scheu s Building.
st. Joseph's Beneficial Society, meets in
81. Joseph Hall, every LIST Monday of
each month.
St. Pstrick's Beneficial Society, meets
1st and Sd Sundays, in st. Joseph's Hall
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
SKIN DISEASES CURED.

By DR.. FRAzIER's Magic Ointment.
Cures as if by magic, Pimples, Black
Heads or Grubs, Blotches and Eruption
on the face, leaving the skin clear,
healthy and beautiful. Also cures
itch, Barber Itch, Salt Rheum, letter,
Ringworm, Scald Head. Chapped Hands.
Sore Nips, old, obstinate Ulcers and Sores,
&c. Skin Disease
F. Drake. Esq, Cleveland, O., suffered
beyond all description from a skin disease
which appeared on his hands, head and
face. and nearly destroyed his eyes. The
most careful doctoring failed to help him
and after all had failed he used DR.. Fra
zier' S Magic Ointment and was cured by
a few applications. The first and only
positive cure for skin disease ever dis
covered. Sent by mail on receipt of price
Fifty cents.
HENRY & Co, Sole Propr's,
SO vssey Street, New York City.
For Blind, Bleeding, Itching or Ulcer
ated Piles. DR.. Williams Indian Pile
Ointment is sure cure. Price Sl.00, by
mail. For sale by Druggists.
M For sale Al Williams drug store.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
The Latest By Josh Billings.

l have never known a sekond
wife but what waz boss of the sit
uashun.
After a man gets to be So years
old he kant form any new habits
much the best he kan do is to steer
his old ones.
Emmy man who kan swamp horses
or catch fish, and not lie about it, liz
az piuz as men ever get to be in this
world.
An enthusiast is an individual
who believes about four times as
much as any body believes.
The dog that will follow anybody
amt worth a cuss.
Thoze people who are trying to
get to heaven on their kreed will
find out at last that they didn't have
a thru ticket.
Too long courtships are not always
judicious. The partys often tire out
skoreing fore the trot begins.
One quart of cheap whiskey (the
cheaper the better) judiciously ap-
piled, will do more for the devil than
the smartest deacon he has got.
/ don't reckOlect doing ennythino
that was just a little ashamed ov
but what somebody remembered it,
and sure, once in while, to put. me
in mind of it.
Young men, learn to wait; If you
undertake to sett a hen before she
il ready you will lose your time, and
confuse the hen besides.
Nature seldom makes a phool !;
she simply furnishes the raw mater
ials and let's the fellow finish the job
to suit himself.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
Stories, Sketches, &c.
DISINHERITED.

"Hump!n said Mr.. Daniel Somer-
set. Il always thought you were a
fool, Vivian, and now l know it. The
idea-you want to get married"
Vivian Severn laughed, showing
his handsome teeth-a good humored,
joyous laugh-in no wise affected by
his uncle's sharp ungraciousness, fol-
he had not been acquainted with Mr.
Somerset twenty-five years for moth
ing.
"Is it so very alarming, Uncle
Daniel?" he asked promptly.
~ think so. Alarming-yes, be
yond question. You are an extrava.
giant young dandy, with not an idea
to your noddle, beyond the cut OF
your clothes, or the composition of a
button-hole boquet in February, with
no Judgment greater than that re-
quired to decide the flavor of the
soup at the club dinner. And you
want to get married"
Vivian was used to it, and he knew
the iracible old bachelors bark was
worse than his bite. He leaned back
in his chair and listened to the petu-
liant TRADE.
"That may be SO, Uncle Daniel
all the same, i think BERTHE and | will
risk it.'
"Bertie 7 Bertie who9"
"Miss Ethelbertha Gray, uncle"
"Why didn't you say so theng A
very beautiful, accomplished girl
after you because she supposes you
are my heir"
"Uncle Dan!"
Vivian Strengthened up in his chair,
sudden little fire in his blue eyes.
Uncle Daniel, that is not true"
~ lie, do L? Very well, sir; am
used to such accusations from you.
Go ahead and make a cOnSummate
idiot of yourself, if you want to-but
mark my word, you will rue the day
you ever married BERTHE Gray.
know the ways of the world-I have
been taught its treachery, its policy,
its utter want of human kindness be-
fore You were out of dresses"
"But with all due respect for your
opinion, uncle, you don't know Der
tie Gray as | know her. Watt
Mr.. Somerset jumped up from his
chair in passion.
"Don'tspeak to me about it. Mind,
not another word unless You wish to
be disinherited."
Then Vivian looked angry and
rose from his chair.
~ would not hesitate a moment
between your money and the woman
| love. Do as you please; SHALL"
And after he was gone Mr.. Somer-
set walked uneasily up and down his
elegant library, his forehead all
puckered up, his mouth contracted
in a savage pout. his bright, little
gray eyes swapping and flashing.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
Poetry.
For The HERALD.
THE BEGGAR AND THE RICH MAN.


THE BEGGAR AND THE RICH MAN.
BY PUPIL OF THE GRAMMAR SCHOOL.
Will you please let me in, good master
Have compassion on one who is old,
And give me shelter for the night,
Away from the wind and the cold.
All day I've travelled round, good sir,
And / have had no bread
The night is now approaching,
And We no place to lay my head.
You need not have single fear
That your barn will burn,
Or steal anything from out your house,
For dishonesty spurn.
Leave my door - the farmer cried,
Begone, you worthless scamp;
Go for yourself living earn
You lazy, worthless tramp.
That you are old know is true,
And your face tells Of sorrow and care, ,
He stopped, for the old man left and said
:" / must go, only God knows where.
The beggar left the rich man g door,
And sorrow was at his heart;
And to God he brsathed simple prayer,
That death should strike it's dart.
He thought of all that he had done
In the ages of the past;
He thought of what he might have been,
And what he was at last.
Said he I: 81 was rich man once,
But now am ragged and poor;
Once / had plenty of friends who loved
Now III driven from the rich man d
door.
g Once was the pride of parents,
Who were more than life to me:
But now I am despised by all / meet,
And forever will be.
" And what was it that brought me
down
From honor to disgrace2
From wealth, health and happiness,
To die in this dismal place?
"Ah drink it was that brought me
down.
For drunkenness IN here
And that II cause me in this bitter cold
To end my wild career.
"When first I touched the social cup,
All little did think
That l, youth of fashion,
Would e'er be slave to drink.
" But the tempter tempted and fell
Regretted have my birth
For although child of heaven now,
m ruined child of earth. p"
With these painful thoughts upon his
mind,
He died without groan,
Amid the chirping of the birds
And the bleak night wind S moan.
And naught was there to mark the spot
Where the poor old beggar lay;
None knew where he passed from earth
to heaven,
Except the birds of prey.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

| wish to inform my customers and the
public in general, that l have removed
my shoe store to North Queen Street,
and have increased my stock OF
BOOTS AND SHOES
of the latest styles. just received from
the mandatory and made especially to
order, fine lot of Ladies & Misses Tam
peco Morocco and French Kid Shoes l
call the farmers attention to my stock of
handmade Kip Boots, and children s
school calf shoes! These goods are made
of the best material and sold cheap for
cash! Call and get Lyons Patent Heel
Stiffner to keep your boots and shoes from
running over! Boots and Shoes made
to order Repairing neatly done! Give
me call JOHN LYONS,
Next door to Adams Express Company,
North Queen Street, Martinsburg.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
MAIL ARRANGEMENTS.

Post Office on Queen Street, doors from
Luthsran Church, j. n. Wisner, Postmaster.
CLOSE.
For Baltimore, Washington. Philadelphia,
New York. and East, at IL noon, p m. and p.
10.
For Cumberland, Pittsburg and West, at IL 40
p. IN. and p. m.
For Iiagcrstown, Harrisburg and points on
Gum berlapG Valley, at 6 80 a. m. and y. m.
For Bunker Hill and Gerardstown, at l p. m.
ARRIVE.
From Baltimore, Washington, Philadelphia
New York nnd East. at Il 20 p. m. and III IS p m
Frem Hagerstown, Harrisburg, and points on
Cumberland Valley, at Is p. IN. and II 20 p m.
From Cumberland, Pittsburg, and West, Is
p. m. and OF a. m.
Frsm Bunker Hill and Gerardstowe ut IL 90
a. IN.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
A. e. Ballet.
Has full stock of
FRESH GROCERIES,

which he sells at the lowest living
prices.
VOLTS Building, Queen Street.
He keeps constantly on hand large
stock of
Sugars, Coffees, Syrups,
Molasses, dried & canned Fruits,
Confectioneries, Cheese,
Crackers, Fish, Salt, Glassware,
Cedarware, Brooms, &c. Fine line
Cigars and Tobacco.
Walk right in and ask for what
you don't see.
Country Produce bought and sold
or exchanged for goods.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
ASSOCIATIONS.

Citizens Mutual Building Association,
meets every Wednesday night, at Office
of George w. Feidt.
Tuscarora Building Association, No. 2,
meets every Monday evening, in office of
Mai. E. S. Troxell.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

"When grow up, I'll be a man
won't l 7" asked q little Austin boy
of his mother. eyes, my son; but
if you want to be man you must
be industrious at school and learn
how to behave YOURSELF aWby,
mamma, do the lazy boys turn out to
be women when they grow upy'
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
General Information.
CHURCHES.

CHURCHES.
PRESBYTERIAN, Queen Street, between
John and King, Rev. f. M. Woods, Pas.
Sabbath School, $50 a. m. Preaching.
700. Prayer meeting: Wednesday even
ing, 700.
TRINITY (EpiscopaD, corner King and
College Streets. Rector Rev. Robert
Douglas Roller. Services, IL a. m. and
7.S0 p. m. Sunday School a. m. Trinity
Mission House, Liberty Street, Strines-
vile; Services, Wednesday, 100 D. m.
Sunday school, p. m.
BAPTIST CHURCH, West King Street,
Rev. A. E. Rodges, Pastor Services at
11.00 a. m. and 7.30 p. m.
LUTHERAN. corner Queen and Martin,
Rev. r. c. Holland Pastor Services II 90
a. m. and p. m. Wednesday evening
services, 7:30.
METHODIST EPISCOPAL. corner Burke
and German Streets, Rev. F. NJ Rice,
Pastor: Services 11.00 a. M. and s D. m.
ST. JosEPH's CATHOLIC, Queen Street,
between John and King, Rev. J. Mckee
frey, Pastor Mass at Z and 1920 a. M.
vespers at 4 p. NJ: Sunday School at 9.30
METHODIST E. SOUTH, German Street,
between Burke and King, ReY. John
Landstreet pastor Services HOO a. M.
and ZOO p. m.
REFORMED, East Burke Street, Rev. J..
Hoffheins, pastor Services HOO a. m.
700 p. M, Lecture 40, p. M, Sunday
School .. 90 %. N.
UNITED BRETHREN, Strinesville, Rev. j.
II. Underwood, Pastor Services 11.00
a. n. and 7.30 p, M, Sabbath School $50
3. m.
First Congregational, Services in rooms
of Y. III. G.. A. Queen St, at IL 90 A. M.
Sabbath School at 900 A. NJ.
CHURCH OF GOD, Rev. Joshua Hutson,
Pastor; Services at 800 p. m.
FIRST FREE BAPTIST, (colored), Raleigh
Street, between Martin and Burke, Rev.
Fl. +. Keys, Pastor Services HOO a. m.
aad 7.30 p. M; Sabbath School $50 a. m.
ET. ZION NJ. E. CHURCH, (colored) :,
West Martin Street, Rev. G. r. Williams,
nastor. SarYices 10 90 a. M and Z 30 u M
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
HO, FOR THE ANVIL !

Blacksmithing in all its Branches
JOS. S. CHAMBERS, SR.,
y Winchester Pike, Near Toll Gate. L
MARTINsBURG, w. VA.
All kinds of work for farmers and me-
chanics and the public in general.
Special Attention Gicen to Country York
Such as repairing carriages, wagons,
farming implements, and
shoeing horses.
81 TlLSFA CITON GUARANTEED.
GIVE HIM A CALL.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

"Why were you not at church
last Sunday, Clara ~ asked Amelia.
Clara" | couldn't; didn't have any
thing to wear. / shall go next Sun
day if my sack is done.n Amelia
]" Oh, you sack-religious thing!r
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

Girls, if you wish to have small
mouths repeat at frequent intervals
during the day this: Fanny Finch
fried five floundering frogs for
Francis Fowle's father,
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

"How's business with you,
Brown 7" asked his friend Pingry.-
Not very lively said Brown.
/" But you have made something,
suppose p Oh, yes; I made an
assignment.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

As fire is discovered by its own
light, SO is virtue by its own excel
ence. 10 tadi
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04

No man is more miserable t6sn Is
that hath no adversely.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
Or. Q. p. WELSH,

REsIDENT DENTIST
Graduate Of Baltimore Dental College. Offers
his professional services to the people of Mar
ttnssurg, Berkeley and adjacent countless
Charges moderate. Oaice, Corner Burke and
College atreets, Martinsburg, w. Va.
Gas administered, when desired.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
z. 6. TROXEEL.

A7TORREI-AT-L4H,
Martinsburg w. Va.
Courts :--BeTkeley Jefferson and Morgan:
es~special attention given 10 the collection OF
pensions back pay, etc, collections, convey
Sneing and all kinds of legal business promptly
aAd PerAsNernglY attended to-
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1882-03-04
Business Eurds.
Y. n. n. FLICK,
GEO. w. FElDT,
j. 8. HALDE AN,

ATTORyEYATLAW,
Promptly attends to all business entrusted to
him. OFFIcE-N. Z Corner Public Square,
Ma<iinBburg, W. Va.
Huntsville gazette., 1882-04-22
PITH AND POINT.


Candy pulls are in fashion again,
but they are now called "glucose ten
sions.- Philadelphia Ncaos.
If evil communications corrupt good
manners, the oyster must be bad fish,
for he's brought up with rake.
--"Pat," said course, conceited fel-
low, "tell the biggest lie you can, and
here are two shillings for you"
"Faith," said Pat, ''yer honor's gin
tleman."
-"How do you clean tinware p"writes
a young lady. "What on earth are you
giving us? We don't clean tinware at
all We don't do anything but write
pretty things. ."-Chicago Tribune. e'
Spread of Teetotalism: First indi-
vidual (to second ditto): "Have
drink, old man?" Second ditto (hesi-
tatingly): ..No, thanks; but if you dom,
mind III have half a pork pie. ''-Jucty.
81 wish was worth S1,000,000,n
said gentleman. "What good would
it do you, for you don't spend your pres
ent income?" inquired a friend. go,
could be economical on larger scale"
The other day the Rochester Er-
press headed batch of items sour
Corset Department. The foreman said
he would try to squeeze the "Corset De-
partment'' in, though he thought the
proper place for it was in the waist
basque-it. .t.-,a
-"Sambo, whar you git dat watch
YOU wared to meeting last Sundavp"
allow do you know that had watch?n
ssKase / seed the chain hang out de
pocket in 'front.' "Go way, nigger!
'Spose you see halter round my neck,
you tink dar is horse inside OBJ me?''
DIR. Hahn, who lived among the
Zulus, says that Sin their own houses
the Zulu woman, or 'taras,' il the SUI
preme ruler, and the husband has moth
inc at all to say" DIR. Hahn need not
have gone so far from home to discover
this peculiarity. He might have found
in this country women who are supreme
rulers in their households-regular
sttearers''-and the husband has moth
ing at all to say. Or if he has, in about
ten seconds he'll wish he hadn't said it.
-Norristown Herald.
He happened to press the foot Of a
Young lady who was sitting next the
door, in getting out Of street-car. The
damsel, COMPRISING her brows into an
awe-inspiring frown, calculated ..You
clumsy wretch!' Most men would have
looked foolish and apologized, but our
hero was equal to the occasion. "My
dear Young lady," he exclaimed, "you
should have feet large enough to be seen,
and then they wouldn't be trodden up
on.n Her brow relaxed, her eyes spark
led, her lips smiled, and the injury was
forgotten. Philadelphia Herald.