The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1882-12-28
Some very Slim Remarks.

Pendant from this editors box
door at the post office all day
Christmas for the vulgar multitude
to gaze at was what at first sight
seemed to be n pair of Irvine strings
Hopping about, but which on closer
inspection proved to be an elegant
pair of stockings, labeled For
Laps. d. McCord." The straight
part seems to have been moulded on
a broom stick and the feet shaped
upon hams. They were striped
around like BARRIERS pole, because
there was not enough room for two
stripes to run straight down side by
side. Hooks on the top rim of these
pipes were doubtless intended to
hitch over the wearer's shoulder
blades. The heels dragged out be-
hind like the boot of q stage-coach
and the hollow of the foot bulged
out like the cheek of a policy holder
who sues. There was Il fatal error
in the construction. Our foot will
not go through the tube if we start
in from the top, and our brow refu-
ses to enter if we go in from the bot
tom. If we can get the pith
punched out we will send in an ex-
ploring party, and from the charac-
ter of these rhymes we think the
kind friend who presented them can
go through without touching:
CHRISTMAS CHEER FOR OUR EDITOR.
"Gratuitous work" enough you have done,
To break any camels back under the sun.
In your columns so CHEEKY, neat and gay,
You've told us of the bellies that came this
way;
Charming, beautiful, accomplished and rare,
FRirer even than she whom the snake did
I've wondered how best one town could be,
As read the CITIZEN that slways comes
to me.
Your pen, too, has pulled many beau,
And wrote up marriages in glittering glow;
Gave TO suppers, hops and everything
A graceful paragraph, as breezy as spring.
Now, thoughtt but right that you IN turn,
Should have gift that you'll not spurn,
And all unussd to work this idle brain,
Shook with the idea like hurricane.
I'll set dear Lydia Pinkham's sweet face
In pin and tender it with grace.
But now l think l've heard ii said,
The men in town, she has turned their heads,
And you, "they say,n have her Phiz pasted
in your hat;
Don't get riled because repeat things like
that.
Some other gilt know it will have to be;
went to work at once Is you will see.
And knit you pair of cotton socks
To keep warm your excuse Tne) tender hooks.
The lsys could not bel resembling straws,
Work must fl and with 1t pick no flaws.
Now may be the term to use was shanks;
What woman in these days of mems out
stepping rank,
Is expected to know how the bones are
named.
AS she must work so hard to cover up the
same
Old Santa, with his ever genial, smiling face,
Looked IN and saw your socks by the Chin
ney place,
"W hat are these things he laughed ALOUD
by the fre."
Ibid you take for pattern pipe-stem or
broom-strawP
"No, human legl'' he burst his waiItband,
80, pshawP
cycling Jack with laughter, t'You can't
tool me,
| fill up stockings under the roof tres,
Not things like these, with cakes from gold
en- sheaves,'
And not stick of candy would he leave.
Pardon me, these would be rhymes and poor
wit,
Let me know if they are in wrinkles, or do
they fit
That stately calf of yourss or must the
work undo,
And wait for plaster cSst sent up by youE
AUNT TABBY.