The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1882-08-03
ILs.fs.lsra.Es.

\ K ssG.tS-I.t "a. L1sJs
srEsriffat with four letters--O B g T.
A SPIRITED business Manufacturing
whisky.
Cmcrs mules are cducatcd because
they exhibit brayin.
I FUNNY items should never be con-
signed to the grave.
"THE old man eloquent When he
comes home tide off.
The Philadelphia San thinks the
dressmaker is pattern woman.
A LAWYER should never burn coal.
He gets along better with Coke than
Blackstone.
THE man who invented corsets was
foolish, for he might have known they
would all so 10 waist.
"WATER melancholy scene" said the
small boy when the farmers dog chased
him out Of the patch. -
A HoMELy young girl has the consola-
ton of knowing that, if she lives to be
40, she will be a pretty old girl.
az DON'T like that cat; it's got splin-
ters in its feet" was the excuse of o f.
year-old for throwing the kitten away.
A LITTLE heat that can't be beat, the
window open wide little breeze, a lit
tie sneeze, and you're the doctors pride;
$17.25 for ten visits.
AN ambitious young writer having
asked "what magazine will give me
highest position quickest 2" was told,
ga powder magazine, if you contribute
fiery article"
CARLYLE, being once asked the differ
ence between natural fool and an
educated fool, replied, "Just about the
difference between you and me, 1 sus-
pect." The questioner was never able
to determine what kind of fool he was.
AZ SAW big boy and little fellow
quarreling over some marbles to-day"
said John. odd your asked his
father. 81 hope you interfered to stop
their quarreling." eyes, yes" said
John, "I took the little fellows part"
AN old man, with a head as destitute
of hair as watermelon, entered an Aus
tin avenue drug store and told the clerk
he wanted bottle of hair restorer.
"What kind of hair restorar do you
prefer?" al reckon I'll have to take a
bottle of ed-hair restorer. That was
the color of my hair when was boy"
TEXAS SJtings.
| HURRY UP, SIS.
Dearest, delay not,
| Long have waited;
| Sighed for the coming
| OF kisses belated; -
| Fragrant as rosebuds,
Pure "a the dew;
| Dearest, delay not,
| I'm waiting for You.
"JUsr keep your bottle of whisky in
your closet, and, when the girl brings
you your hot shaving water in the morn
ing, you can mix your toddy quickly.
and not soul will know thing about
it," said the M. D. The plan worked
well until the old mans daughter
thought he must be going insane, be
cause he wanted to shave five or si1
times day.
ST. LOUIS boasts of mailing clerl
whose extraordinary memory enable
him to name every postoffice in tn,
State and the county in which it i
situated. A better test would be TO
some one to lend him dollar and thel
cali on him for payment in about tire
weeks. Two to one the wonderful
memory would jump cog under such
severe test. Ordinary memories Away
do,-Detroit Free Press.
IT WAS THE CAT.
Thomas cat and an old bootjack
Go hurting through the yard,
| The cats ahead at the old rose-bed,
| But the bootjack's striving hard.
| For the cat fence Of cleaning pine
Fences are handy for cats, weenD
narrow post for him to climb
(But the bootjack hits the moving machine
Bootjacks ard anthracite coal for you
tOh, the cat can scoot awayD
For me a corn and misfit shoe
(That hangs like pail DER biighted dayD
For you profanity long and loud
(Chaos where once order reignedD
For Tn with bootjack not endowed
| (Plant steeltraps at my headD.
| HOW LEGISLATORS ARE hEGBED.