Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Anacortes, Wash. Ter.) 1882-1887, 1882-05-06
PITn AND POINT.

fIIH AND POlNTs
A KENTUCKY company insures whisky,
but declines to take fire risks on the GUS
toners.
THEN she flung her from the drawbridge,
Sought to end this life of doubt;
But the gods to her were cruel,
For, aasl the tide was out.
"FRrTz" EMMETT says he has signed
the pledge hundreds of times. It's no
use, however. CAL signs fail in dry
weather."
FULL many maid has toyed With kerosene,
And sailed to glory in gorgeous glare;
Full many man has poked at glycerine,
And flown promiscuous through the desert air.
"ACQUIREs the confection" is the
Boston girls translation of "Takes the
cake" Similarly, ''The proper caper"
becomes "The correct contortion."
81 TOLD her I'd never smoke another
cigar" he said, softly, "and 1 won't;
pipes good enough for me-" and he
drew match over the leg of his trous-
ers.
PRISONER behind the grating of cell.
VISITOR What are you in for-con-
tempt?" 81 hope not I haven't got
80 low as that yet. Why, I'm in for a,
oiAuplo uTuuh Ouly.
A GOOD churchman was commenting
at the breakfast table on the conduct Of
one of the vestry, when he was suddenly
interrupted by his hopeful, aged 7, ex-
claiming: "Papa, why don't you pull
down your vestrymen? ?"
FALSE ears, says the London Lancet,
are the new fashionable adjunct" in
Paris, and have already been noticed in
the London drawing-rooms. They are
described as "pearly" and shell like"
The hair is allowed to cover the ugly
things made by nature.
"Do YOU love me. sweet 2" was the wall he wols,
As he pressed her close TO his hearts wild throb-
"Does loves fierce tide irrigate your soul7
Is your heart with mine simultaneously bob
Her soulful eyes few up to his face
And pierced his own with their lovely glitter,
Then soft she murmured with wtching grace
"Do love you, George7 Well, should twit-
Quincy Modern Argo.
A WASHINGTON jury has convicted q
man of manslaugnter vino, by way of
celebrating last Christmas, leaned out Of
the back window of his house and freda
pistol in the air, killing woman at her
wash-tub. It was the irst time he had
ever fred pistol.
Some ladies OF the Ebbitt House.
Washington; were discussing the numer-
GUS newspaper illusions to Mrs. Gar
fields sweet temper and amiability.
when one of them, who looked as if her
life had been battle with unfortunate
circumstances, quietly added: "But 1
suppose Mr.. Garfield never came home
at 2 o'clock in the morning and tried to
get into bed with his boots on"
THE following pomelet is excellent Of
its kind:
From OF the running rivulet the ICY chain is
And the nutter Of the winslet Of the dovelet is
The quaoket of the duckle. in the brooklet we can
And the rootet Of the piglet viii presently appear
-7eras SVtsngs.
LONDON Punch; Old gentleman (mil-
itary man, guest of the Squire, convers-
ing with smart-looking lustic)-
"Wourded in the Crimea, were you?
Badlyp" Rustic-"The bullet hit me
in the chist, here, surr, an came out of
meback." Old gentleman" The deucel
Come, come, Pat, that won't do. Why,
it would have gone right through your
learC, man huSIAC- OC1l, AdlA, u0
heart was in me mouth at the tonne.
surr
CuRRAN was once pleading, when an
ass began to bray, and the Chief Justice
interrupted the orator in his address to
the jury, saying: "One at a time, Mr..
Curran, If you please" Curran said
nothing in reply but when he had fin
ished his speech the Judge began to
read his instructions to the jury. Very
soon the ass began once more to bray,
and Curran spoke up: "Does not your
Lordship hear a very remarkable echo
in the court2"
GETTING even: There has IN o
great deal OF bad feeling betwe 1 two
Galveston families, hence tb was
much surprise when they inte married.
A friend, in speaking to the lather Of
the bride, asked il the families had
made friends. "Not bit Of it.
hate every bone in my son-in laws
BODY" "Why did you let him marry
your daughter, then ?" "To get even
with him. guess you don't know that
girls mother as well as l do"
"WE have heliotypes, madame, that
I can show you, prints OF rare beauty,
copies Of the old masters and Of new
productions of art; but these can hard
" serve your purpose" Prints !! she
exclaimed, with animation ".why, am
out to-day to buy something OF the kind
for q dress. Do your prints wash 2"
The interview was becoming Q little
painful. and so he explained matters to
h. 60 which oho raanOndad with An