The Penn's Grove record., 1882-03-18
Snoring in a Foreign Tongue.

"I.'s funny how careless they get
aAou. Joint powder after they get
seed to H." said Woodtick Williams
the other day TO a Boomerang msn.
1t. mighty harmless looking stuff,
ard you vouldn'J think II you DIDN'T
k1ev that it was, that It would blew
man M any quicker than d ball of
Ponsxplosive Nebraska butter.
~ KNOW when / was sinking on the
Revorish Hornet and had & cabin up
In slippery Ellum gulch, a. frss We
vas powerful careful about u joint
powder, end kept it in q hole in the
aide of tue hill, but after We got more
ANxniliar with it we got 20 keeping it
into the Co in, and in about two weeks
We % ea to sit on the bcx when we
piAyoi Black Maria and Pedro,
AFTER this we found tha, this kind
81 a~,ncs1ins worked better if 1t was
kept kind of warm, and we used to
pat TIE little cakes Of joint powder
snS.r tie Mistress nights so they ID be
kind Of warm in the morning TO blast
VII,
1--WE had a Polander on the night
shif of the Feverish Hornet that the
bows called Neuralgia Phla9kowbiski.
lie was the wort MAI TO swear nights
And snore days tina. / eversaw. Whtn
he used to go down in the shaft and
sw q few times in the dialect Of his
fstherland, the other men bad to come
70 tie surface for fresh air. he gsner'
ally swore till he got excited and his
Jaw get cramped on an imported COB
Of profanity, and then he would quit
awhile. We called his style OF swear
The Anglo. Kosciusko swear. 1t gen
orally Jared tins foot wall and shat
tered the vein matter so that we had
N timber up a little after he got
through.
"Eis Sc ore was about rs bloodhound
ing as biz unique style of swear. He
psed to snore in his own native tongue.
OF course, the force of habit is strong
sst on a mar when he Is asleep. That's
Why he never tried to snore in English.
when he seemed to be getting the
most comfort cut of his slumbers and
lad his mouth open so you could throw
o Magnolia ham against his liver, and
snored 30 as to get In all the double rs
and Q's and rs and Polish dipthongs
and other funny business, it made the
foor Of the cabin creak, and the cook
stove would fall down and the clock
usec to stop, and stock in the Feverish
Hornet would go down 10 cents a
share.
"well, Neuralgia Phlaskowhiski,
working on the night shaft as he did,
lad to do his heavy sleeping during
iAe day, while the rest of US was TO
wsrk In the shaft. The day'shift con-
Aisted of myself and a man named
Marco Bozzaris Smith, and he might
shift was composed of a picked crew,
consisting of Neuralgia Phlasko-
whiski and a man from Zion that we
called Anonymous, because we never
knew what his name was.
Anonymous slept in a tent, because
he Asid he was a little nervous and
sdsety Ike and couldn't sleep in a
boiler factory. So he pitched his tent
about q mile down the gulch, where
the sound OF Neuralgia's snores was
partially deadened.
About 9 O'Clock p. NJ. one pleasant
July day, there was a loud crash in
eMppsry Ellum gulcb, that egitsted
the eourtry for four miles around, and
cl:sG the DIR with fragments Of bed
clothes ard cooking utensils. We
weas down to the cabin but it wasn't
there.
"Ths ccncussion of Neuralgia Phlas-
kowhiski's snore had set off the giant
powGer concealed about bis bed, and
distributed the whole dog-gone rsnch
over the surrounding scene.
1--WE postponed the fpIeral for two
weeks and asked the prospecscrs Of
the stste to bring in such fragments Of
deceased ss Eight lie found. At the
Acnr appointed the mourners gathered
around y baking powder can contain.
ing az that was mortal OF Neuralgia.
Death had worked & wordrous
shspge n the expression Of the fea-
lures Of the remains. Very few could
recognize the deceased.
Mr.. PhlGskowhiski had always
bsea cursed with a fear that he would
be buried alive, and Marco Bozzaris
Smith suggested that the remains
should lie in state for a week or two,
bat the rest of US felt so positive about
bis death that The ceremonies were
allowed to 70 n
This little episode seemed to us
like q solemn warning, and after that
We kept our giant powder uuder the
natterss Of a mar who didn't snore in
foreign Language.
1.-THE good old Anglo-Saxon spore Is
geod enough fer the every day hum
drum CO life. When the langusge. Of
This country INT coed enough to
sasre with in a mining camp, It's time
10 adjourn.