The Mankato free press. [volume] (Mankato, Blue Earth County, Minn.) 1879-1924, 1882-12-22
Bill Nye Will Resipn.

At the next term Of the District Cont
we shall resign the Office of United
States Commissioner for this judicial
district, an Office which we have held
so long and with such great credit to
ourseif. Fearing that in the hurry and
rush of other business our contempOra-
ries might overlook the matter, we have
consented to mention briefly the fact
that at the opening of court Judge Blair
will be called upon to accept the
resignation of n of our most tried and
true officials, who has for so long held
up this corner of the great national fab
ric.
1t has been our solemn duty to ex-
anime the Greaser who sold liquor to
our red brother and filled him up with
the deadly juice Of the sOurmash tree.
1t has devolved upon MS to sinch the
soft-eyed lad who stole baled hoy from
the reservation, and it has also been our
glorious privilege to examine In a pre-
liminary name the absent-minded
party who gathered unto himself the
United States mule.
We. have attempted to resign before
but failed. One reason was that it was
a novel proceeding in Wyoming and no
N seemed to know how to go to work
at it. No one had ever resigned before
and the matter had to be hunted up and
the law thoroughly understood.
The Office is n of great profit, as we
have said before. 1t brings wealth into
the Golfers of the United States Commits
sioneer in a way that is well calculated
to turn the head of most people. We
have, however, succeeded in controlling
o%urself, and have so far suppressed that
beastly pride which wealth engenders.
With a salary of 1925 per annum. and
lead pencils, we have steadily refused
to 60 to Europe, preferring rather to
plod along here in the wild West, al
though we may never see the beauties
of a foreign shore.
Official duty was at all times weigh
ing upon our mind like a leaden load.
OFT in the Silly night we have been
Weakened by the depressing thought that
that moment, on somo distant reserva-
ton some ~ale-faced villain might be SELL
ing valley tan to the gentle, untutored In
dian brave, and it has tortured US and
robbed us of slumber and JOY. Now it is
u relief to know that very soon we shall
be free from this great responsibility.
If an Indian gets drunk on . reserva-
ton, or a time-honored government
mule is stolen, we shall not be expected
to get up in the night and administer
swift and terrible justice to the offender.
Old-man-with-a-torpid-liver a get as
drunk as he pleases on the reservation.
1t does not come under our Jurisdiction
any more. We car sleep now nights
while some other man peels his coat
and acts the United States Nemesis for
this diocese.
Sometime during the ensuing week
we will turn over the lead pencil and
the blotting paper of the Office to our
successor. We leave the Indian temper
ance movement in his hands. The
United States mnle kleptomaniac also
we leave with him. With a clear con-
science and an unliquidated claim
against the government for 1896, the
earnings of the past two years, we turn
over the office, knowing that, although
we have sacrificed our health, we have
never evaded our duty, no matter how
dangerous or disagreeable.
Yet we do not ask for any g~old-head-
ed cane as a mark of esteem on the part
OF the government. We have a watch
that does very well for US, so that a
testimonial consisting of a gold watch
costing $3.50 would be unnecessary.
Any little trinket of that kind would of
course show how ready the Department
of Justice is to appreciate the work Of
all efficient officer, but we do not look
for it nor ask it. A thoroughly fumigat-
ed and disinfected conscience is all we
want. That is enough for US. Do not
call out the band. just let us retire
from Office quietly and unostentatiously.
As regards the United States Commits
sionership we retire to private life. In
the bosom of our family we will forget
the turbulent voyage of official life
through which w have passed, and as
we monkey with the children around
our hearthstone we will shut Dur eyes to
the official suffering that is going On all
around us.-Laramie boomerang.