Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1882-02-06

the door locked kneel down some Sabbath
afternoon and read while kneeling the lith
Chapter Of John. Come, now, there's /
challenge. Surely he who scouts the GOD
of the Bible and defies the army OF prophets
and apostles and bullies perdition is cour-
ageo1s enough, especially when his door is
Locked, to kneel down and read the 14th
chapter OF John. Is it not most ineffably
mean, accursedly mean, TO leave his early
home covered with the cloud Of obloquy II
either OF his parents were good? l stand
at the door of his mothers sepulcher and
cry out for justice from this infidel lecturer.
Ungrateful Infidel,
Owe You nothing to the bosom that nursed
Won, d the arm that EMBODIED you, to the
lips tliht prayed for you, to the hands that
toiled Tor your welfare? You do not be-
lieye il the Bible. You do not believe in
the CD of the Bible. Do yeu believe IN
your Mother? do not implead you by
John 0alvin's God, for You say he was
.fiend, nor the God of John Wesley, for you
say ne was a fanatic, or the God OF the
westminster Assembly catechism, or the
God OF your father, or by your fathers God,
but by your mothers God, by the birth
pang that launched you, by the cradle that
rocked you, by the hour when you were
held at the altar in the old meeting house,
and the aeicer of religion said: Robert,
babtise thee IN the name Of the father,
and of the Son, and Of the Holy Ghost.
By that God beg you to reconsider and
turn and live.
The meanness of ofinfidelity is displayed
by Mr.. Ingersoll in the attempt to destroy
the
worlds Chief Solace,
without Offering any substitute Youhave
only TO read his addresses on funeral occa-
hnr Mt
fidelity in the dark day OF trouble. There
is more cheer in the owls hooting at mid
night than in Mr.. Ingersolfs words at the
grave. You might as well get the spirit of
eternal darkness to lecture on the bright
ness of everlasting day. The Bible has
comforted in trouble amounted millions,
why, then. take it away? What wouldyou
think of a crusade like this: A man makes
up his mind TO destroy all the worlds med
icines He organizes an effort IN all the
cities and in all the earth to take all the
anodynes and sedatives out OF the apothe-
cary stores and out of the hospitals The
medicines are seized and hurled into the
rivers and lakes. The invalid wakes at
midnight with violent paroxysms of dis
tress. The nurse has no drops to give him,
but instead thereof an essay to read him
on the absurdities of morphine and ner-
vines in general. While the patient is
writhing in pain, the nurse is in Mysteries
of laughter at the origin Of anodynes, the
inconsistency of anodynes the cruelties Of
anodynes, the indcCencies OF anodynes:
In the hospital gangrened
limb is being amputated.
The patient says: Give me ether, give
me chloroform ''0h, no says the doc:
will read to you few laughable chapters
| on the mistakes OF James y. Simpson. the
discoverer of ether and Doctors Mott Rush,
Abernethy and Hamilton.
"The Anmsthetics Have All Been
Destroyed"
says the operator. "What, nothing left?"
Nothing except fun on the the subject OF
medicines. All you patients in Bellevue
hospital lie down and stop groaning, and
all YOU heart broken people of all the cities
stop crying. Take this allopathic dose of
wit. Try this Strengthening plaster Of sar-
casm. We have found the catholicon at
| last Here is bottle OF ribaldry. Shake
it we'll up, and take a spoonful after each
meal Ii that fail, bathe in this solution OF
pleasantly. Take an injecture Of this de-
rision. Tickle the skeleton Of death with
a repartee. Make the king sf terrors
cackie. For all the agonies Of all ages-a
! Joke" In other words, while millions OF
people are willing with uplifted hand, To
| affirms that the gospel of Jesus Christ is the
grandett coincidence they ever had, Mr..
| Ingersoll proposes to take it away, and sub
| stitute nothing, absolutely nothing. Can
YOU imagine greater heighth or depth or
| breadth or length or
Immensity Of Meanness,
Mr.. IngerSoll also attempts to ia ke away
| all explanation of the future and substi-
tute the religion of Don't know" Is
there u future life? Don't know. Will
we recognize each other hereafter? Don't
| know. Is the soul immortal? Don
| know. Is there a GOd' Don't know.
! Where are our departed friends? Don
know. That religion of Don't know is
to take the place OF the religion of II
| know" Il know that my Redeemer liv-
eth" IL know in whom i have believed
! and am persuaded that He will keep that
which have committed unto Him. The
| religion of awful negatives the iniidel pro-
| poses to substitute for our religion of glo-
| riouS positives-a world Of reunion and
ecstasy and high cOmpanionship and wor'
| ship and stupendous victory, the mightiest
| lows of earth not high enough to reach
| even the base of the Himalayahs Of uplift-
| ed splendOr which await all those who on
wing of ch ristian faith soar to them. Did
| you hear Of the crusade TO put out all the
| lighthouses near the coast? Did you know
| that by conspiracy next month on the same
night Eddystone lighthouse, Bell Rock
| lighthouse, Sherryvore lighthouse, Cor
dOusn lighthouse, Barnegate lighthouse
New Lon don lighthouse, Montauk light
house and
The Six Hundred and Twenty Light.
houses
en- our Atlantic and Pacific coasts are to be
n,N tl,nt, ,tytt . hat NIytll
ships do near the coast? On that night
what will become of the one million sailors
on the sea and the millions more OF pas
sengers? Who will arm against such a gi-
/ gantic conspiracy? Every man, woman
and child in America and in the world,
But that is a parable. That is what inf
deity is attempting to do-to put out the
light Of all the voyagers TO eternity. VIII
they kindle any substitute for those conf
ing nearer the narrOws OF death? Will they
leave the entire coast of the next world
covered with the blackness OF darkness?
Yes! YES. absolutely nothing, unless il be
glow-yorm of wit or a tiretiy of jocOSity.
What a magnificent mission these intidels
have started on!-the putting-out OF light
houses and the breaking-up of lifeboats
and the dismissal OF all pilots and the turn
ing of the epitaph on your child's grave
into farce. Walter Scotts "0ld Mortali-
ty'' took chisel and went across the land
to cut into palmer letters the half obiiter-
ated inscription on the tombstone, but Mr..
Ingersoll is spending his life with hammer
and chisel cutting out from slab and mon.
ument the story OF the resurrection and
Of Heaven.
He is to-day
The IconocIast
of all village church yards and city eeme-
teries and Westminster Abbeys. What
mission. Instead Of Christian consolation
for the dying, freezing sneer. Instead OF
a prayer, a grimace. Instead OF Pauls tri-
umphant defiance sf death, going no one
knows where; to stop, no one knows when;
to do, no one knows what. To show that
ipfidelity has no resources to provide
substitute for anything good, l ask you to
give me a list of merciful and educational
institutions established by infidelity. Not
the Christian commission or the sanitary
commission of our last war, for Christian
George A. Stewart was the President OF the
one. and Christian DIR. Bellows the Presi-
dent of the other. Give me the name OF
a. oollagas huilt by infdality Not Yale