Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1882-09-21

"A
YOU meet with Texas beggar, but for cheek,
he, or she, as the case may be, has no equal.
A woman with snuff stick in her mouth,
has been prowling about Austin taking up con-
tributions for several days past.
Her demand is based on the assertion that
she is a widow; and her husband was mason.
A kindhearted gentleman, whose assessment
she had fixed at fifty cents, gave her quar-
ter, remarking:
'tI've only got quarter"
sWall,' said she, removing her snuff stick
to expectorate, II reckon III have to credit
yer for the other quarter until I come in
again. but I kin tell yer, as friend, that on.
less yer come down to a cash basis yer never
will have more than quarter about yer cloth
es. Eff I didn't demand cash down, after
awhile wOuln't be much better off than you
is, and she let the quarter drop into her pOck
ct among handful of half dollars-1etds
SJtings.
ALTOGETHER LIKELY.-A well-known and
popular Nashville sporting man who went tc
the Louisville drill, put up his entire pile or
the Porters; after that, he borrowed from ev
cry friend in Louisville, bet that, and then
bet on credit. After drill was over he was
standing despondently in the rotunda of one
of the hotels trying to think if there was any
come home on, when he was approached by
gentleman in search of Owen McGloid. Fol
for some reason he appeared siezed with the
idea that Zan-we mean the Nashville man
was McGloid, and approaching said: Excuse
me, but are you Owen McGloid % 81 don't
know reckon am Pm owing everybody,
and expect am owing McGloid along with
the rest of them, " was the Respondent answer.
-Nashrille american.
A CANDID CoLoRED VoTER-The colored
voters are beginning to understand politics as
we'll if not better than most white voters.
One of the candidates for an office at the mu-
ncipal election at Austin not long since relied
him out among the colored voters. The can
didate was beaten After the election he was
told that the colored political friend had vo-
ted against him. He did not believe it; but
meeting him one day the ex-candidate said:
'I'll give you a dollar, Jim, to tell me who
you voted for.'' 81 voted agin you, boss. y
''Well here is the dollar for your candor.''
''Look here boss, if you am gwine to pay for
the candor, I mout as well own up. voted
agin you free different times. Three dollars
more if you please, boss"-1eras SJtings.
LIKE Mr.. BEECHER.-"I often cross the
street to avoid meeting a man." says Mr..
Beecher, mot because have anything against
him, but simply because l do not feel like
speaking to him. I suppose all men are this
way" Yes. nearly all men are that way, Mr..
Beecher, and weare glad you mentioned this
subject, for it gives us a chance to agree with
great man. We sometimes cross street
and climb fence to avoid meeting a man,
not because we have anything against him,
but because he has something against us-a
little bill, Mr. observation-disclosures 1rareler.
a. Zeno, the Greek philosopher, believed in
an irOn-handed fate, but he was good Calvan-
ist enough to round off a theological point
very nicely. When his servant said in excuse,
master, remember that l was foreordained
to steal the money! he replied, as he brought
the thong down on the fellows back, ''That
may be, but was also foreordained to fog
you for it, and don't you forget it."-HeraM
elbow much do you charge for your pea
nuts ?" asked lady at the fruit stand at the
Central Station. ''Ten cents quart, !" replied
the clerk. ''Too dear,'' said the lady. But" :"
presisted the young man, ''these are hand-pck-
ed, and we warrant them to cure consumption
and heart disease The woman actually
purchased two quarts.-Rochester Chronicle.
g"When did George Washington die ?'
asked an Austin teacher Of a large boy. SIS
he dead ?" was the astonished reply. "Why
it was not more than six months ago that
they were celebrating his last birthday, and
now he is dead, Ids bad year on children.
reckon his folks let him eat something that
didn't agree with him. "-ISras SJtings.