The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-10-17
Written for the Sunday Morning BIzoo
UNCLE JACK ON LOVE.


the old man, but after he'd got under way
knew he wasn't to be headed of and so l
listened, while he discoursed as follows:
"Yes," said he, 81 know, but love is a
mighty curious thing, and when it once
gifts i'm its work on poor Teller, it mnst
have its run, jest as the measles or the
each, or some of the rest of them pesky
diseases. Now there was Jce, our Joe
lie was twenty-one years old, or there
abouts, and about as sensible Young Teller
for his age as you'd often find. But, after
he met Matilda Smith a time or two and
she rolled them black eyes of her'n at
him, he Jest want no account for any,
thing; couldn't trust him a minute. Used
to send him afte: wood and he'd tote the
sawbuck into th. house, AID when he'd GO
to the field to plow-it's fact-he'd hitch
the HOSES to the fence and lean thar
against them pillow handles Till the sun
would nigh about blister tie head off'n
him. got so l watched him, Jest kind o.
curious like, to see what the critter'd do,
and I've seed him git afore the lOOkin'
glass and he'd smile till his mouth would
run away round behind his ears aud then,
all of a sudden, he'd pucker it up
into a knot and he'd frown and
he'd teeter up and down. and he'd Jerk
up the back of his coat, and ned run the
buckles up his suspepders, till you'd a
thought-if you hadn't known nothin' at
all could hurt him-that he'd fetch such n
him up the middle, and he'd comb his
hair all down fat. and then he'd roach il
up high, and he'd run his hands into his
pockets and he'd take 'em out again as VI
he'd struck hot pertater, and he'd, groan
and bed sigh and by hockey: he did do it up
brown, al last, and this was the way of it.
Wife, she had cousin come o. visit her,
about the primmest and crankiest old maid
that ever you did see, and one night Joe
had been out pretty late with Matilda, and
when he came home he went to bed, but
the blamed fool, instead O. going to sleep.
he laid thar thinking what he'd heard
Matilda say about "how a gentleman
should be very graceful i'm liftin' lis hat TO
a lady," and at last he couldn't stand il
any longer, but concluded to git up and
practice spell. Now, the lookin' glass he
had in his room wasn't very large, and he
couldn't see himself very we'll, and what
does he do-knowin' all the folks had gone
to bed-but march himself across the en-
try inter the sittin' room, whar he could
hev full swing. There want no harm in
that you know, but it happened that the
old maid had left somethin' she wanted
in that very room, and Jest as she'd about
got re-dy to git into bed, she thought she'd
60 after it, When-all at once, you never
did hear such screams as she let, in all
your bern days. Wife and me, we thought
the house was on fire and We larruped into
our clothes and cut inter that sittin' room
like pair % cyclones, and, Lord har
stood Joe, his hat in one hand, candle in
The other, bowin' and scrapin' and nothin'
on but his shirt, a mighty short one at that,
his long legs Jest glistening, and the old
maid, flannel petticoat around her
her false teeth ont and pair of
about as slim shanks lovmin' ont frem un-
der her Gotten chemise as'd make you sick
90 see OF course We all tried to explain
the matter to her, but il want no use, and
the next mornin' she left. Mad, well. che
I never did see any body any madden. Joe
he got over it finally, but that don't alter
what I said in the first place, love gets
away ~ith 'em for the time bein', nd
makes EN- do some mighty odd things"
And then the old man took fresh chew
Of fine cut, and went on.