The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1882-12-29
!. yerne's Story.
CHAPTER FIRST.

CHAPTER FIRST.
We are now in longitude 100 degrees
fifteen minutes. and latitude eighty
three degrees thirty-tive minutes" said
the doctor.
YES" said the Captain.
1--WE have yet 1852 miles, twenty
yards, fifteen feet and nine inches OF ice
to cross before we reach our ship" said
the doctor.
Exactly" said the Captain.
I'm that case, it is time we were off. "
said Hatteras.
1--WE have left from the explosion
1000 pounds of roast turkey. fourteen
kegs of baked beans and eleven gallons
of apple-jack." said the boatswain.
'.Pack 'em on the sledge at once"
said the Captain.
..And how long will our provisions
hold out?" asked the doctor.
1.-The apple-ja.k will probably las,
until morning." said the American.
"And after thata'
1--WE shall have to send to New jersey
for MORE
"Rut how?'
Leave that to me-" said the Ameri-
can.
''How is the temperature?" asked the
Captain.
Zone hundred and ten below zero"
'Good. Hand me my ear muffs. Are
We ready?"
ave are, said his companions.
ITO the north cried the Captain.
executing song and dance. and kick.
| ing Polar bear OF an iceberg.
TO the north!' shouted his compan-
ions.
CHAPTER SECOND.
"All Is not yet lost" said the Cap
tain. IL have just taken an observa-
ton. We have yet few thousand
miles to 60. Shall we push on. gentle
men?"
1--WE shall" cried his companions.
ave are down to our last drink. -"
sighed the American. but have tel
ephoned to Jersey City for fresh sup
ply. If it arrives in time we are saved.
There is not cold enough in the Arctic
regions to stand up against Jersey City
whisky"
1--WE have not eaten anything for
seven weeks" said the doctor.
but shall we turn back for trifles?'
asked Hatteras. doctor. you must
have a plan. Has your science gone
back on you at this critical moment?
"Give me two weeks in which to
think over our situation" said the doc
tor. seating himself on cake of ice and
falling into a brown study.
"Bearsr said the boatswain.
"Where?" asked the Captain, eN-
citedly.
"They have been at our heels for the
last two months" said the boatswain.
1.-The applejack, said the doctor.
Magnificentm said the Captain.
"One sip and they are at our mercy"
said the boatswain.
"Savedn' said his companions.
CHAPTER THIRD.
1--WE have now occupied this scoOped-
out iceberg for three years." said the
doctor.
"And there has been q monotony
about our existence which does not
agree with my love of excitement" said
the American.
"You forget the whist" said the
Captain
"You know always prefer poker
said the American.
lit is simply national prejudice"
said the Captain.
"Gentlemen, YOU will not quarrel
with the temperature 200 below zero
said the Doctor. Remember We are
now but 5000 miles from the Pole.
Save your breath for our final effort"
ave WILL" said the Captain, shak-
ing the hand of the American and set
ting up the blubber oil for the crowd.
CHAPTER FOURTH.
1--WE seem to be drifting into a seeth-
ing whirlpool" said the Captain.
"Yes. if we keep on this course five
minutes longer we shall probably all be
lost" said the doctor. "Let us take
an observation" and he went forward
with his instrument while the frail DO 1t
on which they were sailing whirled
around at the rate of two thousand rev.
olutions a minute. and then suddenly
shot out at right angles as though fired
from hundred-ton gun.
"A narrow escape" said the doctor.
quietly, pocketing his glass and ven:ur-
ing a t.
How long is it since we lost the
American overboard?" asked the boat
swain.
About four MONTHS" said the doc
tor.
1--WE are now close upon the Pole"
said Hatteras.
LAS near rs can make out that must
be it over there" said the doctor.
"You are right" said the Captain.
ITO England shall belong the glory of
its discovery"
"But it has strange look" said the
doctor. gazing through his glass. Per
haps it's the fault of the Polar Sea at
mosphere."
1T is covered with stripes" cried
the Captain. pulling his hair and leap
ing ashore as the boat grounded upon
the beach.
"Can it be that dastardly Yankee
has
SHAVE, gentlemen" asked the Amer
lean. stepping out of his barber-shop at
the base of the North Pole.
He has," yelled the English Cap
tain. as he proceeded without delay to
go insane.-Brooktyn Eagle.