davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

To Tx-PAYERs.-The textbooks of the
city OF Ironton are now in the hands of the
Collector, and taxpayers are hereby notified
to "come down" with their quota of dollars
Immediately, if not sooner. There are some
delinquent taxes which the parties interested
had best settle ere it is too late. A number
OF polls still remain unpaid. Pay up, tay-
payers! Now is the accepted and acceptable
time. PAUL PATTON, Collector.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

The idea of Arab retiring to Mus
sulman monastery and settling down
to sanctified repose is too absurd for
serious consideration. Before six
months he would be skipping over the
sands at the head of q vast Mohamme-
dan army.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

There is now in bond in the Lexington,
Kentucky, disteict, Is sOOO, 900 gallons of whis-
ky, the largest amount at any time since
the organization of the Internal Revenue
district.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

GARBAGE AND TOMATO PLANTS.-I can
now furnish Cabbage and Tomato Plants to
all who may desire them. Orders by mail
from responsible parties will receive prompt
attention. About the LIST Of May / will also
be ready to furnish Sweet-Potato Plants.
Good plants guaranteed TO all.
apr20tf JNO. NEWMAN, 1ronton.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

Owing to the great amount of ice-cream
sold-eighty gallons in the last three weeks
will, from and after this date, sell ice
cream at cents dish. Ice at $3.50 per 100
pounds, 80 ROBERT HOTSON.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

Music should be in every household, and
any one can have it by buying Smith
american Organ, on installments or cash,
of c. w. Handley & Co., Cor. 10th and Oh
i've Sts., St. Louis.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

The Lig 1T Running Domestic is acknewl-
edged to be the best Sewing Machine in the
world. Buy one for your family for a
present, and you will never regret it:
The machine is beautiful. ornamental and
durable. The attachments are all finely fin
ished and heavy plated. H. DAVIS. Agent.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

The President of the New York freight
handlers states that Robert Ingersoll and
General Butler will lecture on the strike fol-
the benefit of the strikers.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

Handley's Temple of Music-Pianos
and Organs. CIV. Handley e. Co., corner OF
10th and Olive Sts., st. Louis, Mo. Send for
catalogues and terms.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

The Pail Mall Gazette says Of Congress
man S. S. Cox as writer that he likes to
make correct classical illusions and. that his
style is too jerky.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

Twenty-One hundred watermelons crowd
ed into one railroad car in Tennessee tn
other day broke it down.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

The Quaker quarterly meeting at Lees
burg, Ohio, closed Sunday, with an attend
ance Of 5000 people.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

Guild Pianos are giving first-class sat-
isfaction in the st. Charles Catholic Academy,
st. Charles, Mo-: Mrs. Cuthbert's Female
Seminary, 1924 Olive St.. st. LOUSY Also at
Huntsville University, Huntsville.Afo., and
in many other schools where none hut the
best will suit. Sold by c. w. HANDLEY Il
Co, Cor. 10th & Olive SITS, st. Louis.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03

DEMOCRATIC STATE TICKET.
For Supreme Judge:
THOMAS A. SHERWOOD
For State Superintendent of Public
instructions:
w. E. COLEMAN, of Saline county.
For Railroad Commissioner:
JAMES HARDING.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1882-08-03
Probate Docket.

aug6n3
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
Astonished at His Popularity.

Ike Schwindelmeyer lis relative Of
old man Schwindeimeyer, of the we'll
known Galveston firm of Schwindel-
meyer & Co. Ike is recent importa-
ton from Germany, and travels for the
firm. He has q very great opinion of
himself, and thinks that Schwindelmeyer
owns this world, and have builders
lien on the next. Not long since young
Ike Schwindelmeyer visited Houston
On the morning of his arrival. after
breakfast, he started up the avenue 1t
happened that the funeral procession of
4 prominent citizen was also proceeding
up the avenue. Ike was abreast of the
hearse, and the gentleman on the side
walks removed their hats, and remained
uncovered until the hearse had passed.
Ike took all this to himself, and politely
returned the salutations with some pleas
ant remark, As "a beautiful morning,
shentlemensr' or show 'ish yersef to-
dayp''
There was 4 larger crowd of gentle
men at the corner of Pecan street, and
when Ike and the hearse came they all
took off their hats reverently- Ike
was moved at this universal homage,
and exclaimed, half confidentially to HIM
self:
81 wonder who tole 'em I wash travel
ing for Schwindelmeyer & Co.-Gattes-
ton NeUS.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
FbEsa The First Mormon Sermon, s9

The first Mormon preacher was man
named Aldrich. 1 heard his first sermon,
says a correspondent of the Salt Lake
Tribune. When he got up in the school
house he said that he would not preach
the new gospel unless Gabriel blowed
his horn as a sign that he endorsed his
views. just then loud blast of a horn
was heard, and then he began his preach
ing. The horn business had peculiar
effect upon some of the congregation,
and rs it sounded night after night, just
before he preached, many of the ignor-
ant were converted. l was only school
boy then, but myself and other school
boys determined to watch the place
where the sound came from, and in q
grove of trees, not far from the school
house, we found the Gabriel up tree,
with n fish-horn under his coat. We
made him come down, and found him TO
be a worthless fellow whom Smith had
hired to toot for him.
One day when Aldrich was preaching,
he blew his horn, and a lot of old women
came out, thinking the fish and clam
horn trick, and il was the elauching-stock
of the town. We used to tell the man
to get a horn that was not a fish-horn, so
that the people need not rush out, ex-
pecting CLAIMS.
The most astonishing thing about the
matter was that, although the fraud was
fully exposed, and the man who PLAYED
the part of Gabriel was caught dozens
of times behind hedges and out-build-
ings, blowing his old horn for Aldrich
to preach from, there were lots of peo-
pie who believed that the religion was
the only true religion, and plenty of peo-
pie joined the church, and even gave up
all their property to it.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
A Busy Man.

Peck's Milwaukee San is responsible
for this: A Milwaukee man, while in
Chicago, recently, sent a bouquet OF
flowers to relative in Wisconsin town,
and when he heard from them they had
arrived four days after being shipped,
wilted and dead. He was mad, and in
talking it over with a railroad man, the
railroader said: You must not expect
too much from an express agent. Now,
that bouquet had to pass - Junction,
andI know the express agent there. He
is the depot agent, express agent, Keeps
restaurant, is postmaster, acts as
switchman, helps unload freight, checks
baggage, keeps a store, works team on
the road, drives passengers to adjoining
towns, is sexton in a church, buys coun-
try produce, keeps the hay-scales, runs
the caucuses of both political parties,
goes out shooting chickens with hunters,
keeps a pool table, has mill for grind
ing sugar-cane, and runs hop yard,
beside helping his wife run millinery
store. Now, a man who has SO much
business as that ought to be excused for
letting bouquet remain in the express
office week or ten days. The man
who sent the bouquet said, come to think
about it, they were mighty lucky to get
the flowers at all, and he would apollo
gize for any words he might have spok-
en- in the heat of debate. What the
country wants is diversity of indust-
rieS.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
A Curious Loss of Value.

The New York Times calls attention
to the curious loss of value which art
icles suffer as soon as their outward ap-
pearance is in jured. A pair of shoes,
stained on their soles. are sold cheap; yet
after an hours usage it would be inlpossi-
BILE to say whether the soles had or had not
been stained. Gloves with a blemish no
greater than the first wear would lose
much of their value as marketable art
icles. Silk underwear is wholly chang
ed after :: water soaking, and yet the
buyer of it would have it sent to the
wash after few weeks usage. Ccn-
sidering the washings, the water loss on
linen table cloths and napkins should
not be large, but it is. ScrubDing
brushes and fisil-hooks should be exempt
from this class of damage, but more
than once water damage in these articles
has been estimated ut more than fifty
per cent. of their sound value. A lot of
pig-iron was in a warehouse on a dock,
and the warehouse taking fire. salt water
was used in extinguishing the flames. 1t
was claimed that this was highly detri-
mental to the pig-iron. The insurance
company, which must previously have
Iooked upon the risk as almost in
capable of damage, was content to settle
by paying live per cent. of the supposed
value of the pig-iron.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
A Texas Mothsr-in-Law.


ssaseAias ar SPINDLE sAaatsi aosz!s Eyed prede sd
! A tall woman, wearing a sun-bonnet,
came into the office of the chief of police,
and, sitting down hard on the end of q
bench, wiped her nose, snapped her
eyes at the chief. and asked, in voice
=, that reminded one of the sharpening oi
! q saw:
'.Be you the galoot what locks folks
upP''
II regret to say that am occasional
ly obliged to resort to such extreme
measures with refractory persons''
II know all that; but be you the ga
loot?"
Eyes, madam.'
why didn't you say so when asked
you?''
II did"
'You didn't, sir; and if you don't
treat me like lady, I'll fold you up and
sit down on you." and she snapped her
eyes some more like terrier. -. o..
''What doyou want?" asked the official,
looking as if he needed reinforcements
right away, and plenty of them., - ri.
81 want that dirty LITTLE whelp what
married my darter. 1 want to talk
to him on business, but he Ievades
me. If could only get chance to
caresss him once moren' and she breath
ed hard and gritted her teeth, until
the official felt in his pocket for a police
whistle. 't.e -
HE told my darter that he would give
32O acres of land, with a gold mine on
it, to anybody who would ampertate my
jaw with boot-jack. He said my
mouth was like the gate at the Fair
Grounds
..'He meant, l suppose. it was never
shut. don't see how he ever came to
make such ridiculous comparison as
that. Did you ever demonstrate with
him?''
..You bet did. drawed him across
the kitchen table by the hair with one
hand, while basted him with q long
handled skillet, and you should have
heerd him calling me mother darling
and pet but Providence was agin me.
His ear gave way, and he lit out before
1 could reason with him any more. Just
as like as not we will never meet again."
and she sighed heavily.
''Be calm, madam; do not excite your
self too much. usd5 @ a5m 'i4ais
81 am calm. like to talk about
these family secrets. 1t calls up sacred
recollections. It makes me think of nv
darter's fust husband. 1t was real fun
to demonstrate with him. His har did
MT give. He was game. He sassed
back, but, Lord! what time they had
holding the inquest. That was at Ar
kansas, before moved to Galveston.
There was some of his remains in one
corner of the yard, and few more re-
mains hanging on the fence and there was
right peart of him wrapped around the
axe-handle. The jury knew me. so they
brought in a verdict of justifable sui
eide, or homicide, or something like
that. And now to think of this pesky
little, worthless, spindle-shanked, goS-
gle-eyed whelp getting clear off, except
ing few pounds of har. 1 want you to
find him for me. You can know him by
the brands made on him with the hot
skillet. Wanted to ampertate my jaw,
the little brassy whelp! Said my mouth
was like a gate, did he?''
The official said he would hunt for
him, and let her know. As she went
out. she snapped her eyes Significantly
at the official, and remarked:
''You had better find that prodigal son,
or thar'll be music at these headquart-
-GdlUestoas NeUS.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
Scandinavian Honesty.

The traveller in Sweden and Norway
sees many customs which indicate that
the people are unusually courteous
and honest. At the railway dining sta
tions, large table is set in the centre
of spacious room. Upon it are dis
played a variety of tempting dishes, and
piles of warm plates with knives, forks.
and napkins.
The passengers enter without confu-
sion, walk around the central table. Sc
lect what dishes they like best, and then
seat themselves at little marble tables
scattered in the room. Every person,
remembering that his neighbor may like
the dish of which he partakes, helps
himself with moderation. For the din
ner fixed sum is charged, about thirty
nine cents; but wine, beer, and coffee
being e1trds, the guest tells how much
of each he has drank. His word is taken
without question, as no one watches
him.
On board the steamboats, three meals
day are served, which, however, are
not included in the price of the passage.
After each meal, the passenger who has
partaken writes his name in large
book, and records under it what he has
eaten or drank.
fl When he is ready to go ashore, he
calls one Of the waiters-a girl-who
puts the price against every item, adds
up the amount, and puts the sum she
receives in her pocket. When the
money becomes too heavy, she gives it,
without counting, to the stewardess.
All is left to the honesty of the peo-
pie. Instead of this confidence beget-
ting laxity, it makes everyone careful to
pay to the uttermost penny. His honor
is at stake; therefore he feels obliged to
be very particular.
Mr. Du Chaillu tells of servant girl
who brought him a gold locket which
he had dropped on the floor the previous
evening, while displaying his curiosi-
ties.
'Why did you not keep it2' he said,
playfully. :,
s'How, them" she answered, "could
I ever walk erect and look people in the
faceP'
He once had hard work to make a man
accept small sum of money which he
had earned. The honest fellow had
travelled on snow-shOes in the soft snow
for an hour to restore to Mr.. Du Chaillu
his gold watch and chain, which he had
left under his pillow at the house where
he had slept the evening before. Only
by showing him that he was paid for his
loss of time, and not for returning what
did not belong to him, could he be per-
suaded to accept the money.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
The Artifoe Of q Flirt.

In her last letter Clara Belle speaks
of a trick to be played by mischievous
young lady on New Year day. calculat-
ed to raise merry Ned with numerous
hearts. She is pretty, vivacious, self
possessed, and quite capable of seeming
to be carried away by her feelings,
while really as cool as a chilled cucum-
ber. After drinking glass of wine in
duo with the victim, she will beam on
him so warmly that he can't help but
thaw. When he is sufficiently melted
to run into sentimental talk, she will
lead up, half banteringly and half sefi-
ously,, to a proposal to dissolve thepearl
from her ring into his glass of wine. in
order that he may truly drink in token
of remembrance. Although he may
fear that pearls are poisonous, he will
gallantly take the risk. Then she will
break the pearl out of its setting, drop
it into his glass, and watch it iquifE.
The fact is that she has provided herself
with a sufficient number of cheap wax
pearls to meet the largest probable de-
mand. This wretch, by the way, will
wear dress of white nuns cloth, made
up in an aesthetic shape, with bands of
white silk gimp and chenille fringe.
Her arms will be bare to the shoulders,
but her corsage will be high to the neck,
all of which is the highest art at present.
She confidently expects 20 have a right
good time.- Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
An Intelligent Ape,

A man of strict veracity relates these
two facts. of which he was an eye-wit-
ness. He had a very intelligent ape, to
whom he amused himself by giving wal
nuts, of which the animal was extreme
ly fond. One day he placed them at
such a distance from the ape that the
animal, restrained by his chain, could
not reach them. After many useless eff
forts to indulge himself in his favorite
delicacy, he happened to see servant
pass by with a napkin under his arm.
He Immediately seized hold of it, whisk-
ed it out beyond his arm to beat the nuts
within his reach, and so obtained posses
sion of them. His mode of breakingthe
wainuts was fresh proof of his inven-
tive powers. He placed the walnut upon
the ground, let a great stone fall on it,
and SO got at its contents. One day the
ground on which he had placed the wal
nut was so much softe1sthan usual that,
instead of breaking the walnut, the ape
only drove it into the earth. What does
the animal do? He takes up piece of
tile, places the walnut upon it, and then
lets the stone fall while the walnut is in
that position.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
How some People Talk.

Most people talk nonsense when they
are idle. The human brain is naturally
vivacious and elastic, hence that pro-
nounced mental versatility which is al
ways to be found in men of sense. Sensi-
BILE people talk about the weather when
there is no sense in talking about it, just
rs naturally as they do anything that
suggests itself to them when they are
unengaged. For instance we heard a
gentleman say recently: 1--WE need snow
badly" OF course, he did not know
why we needed snow; but such was the
circumstances under which this pro-
found declaration was delivered that the
words seemed to come naturally, and
with an honestness which proved that
their conception and pronunciation was
irresistible to the man. This is Il world
of ups and downs, turbulences and
mutabilities; and one of the oldest yet
most reasonable peculiarities of its in
habitants is the sOul-harrowing, innocent
inclination of all mankind to talk about
the weather, And-do you think it will
rainP- Willian,spOrt breakfast Table.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
Crime and Sensational Literature.

The direct connection between ''pen-
nv dreadfuls' and crime has been de-
monstrated over and over again by the
annals of our own police courts. The
mischievous lad who sometimes since
presented a pistol at her Majesty head,
and got well whipped for his pains. was
found in possession of collection OF
lives of celebrated highwaymen, and
the various gangs of youthful burglars
and would-be highwaymen who have
lately appeared in the dock have one
and all modelled their career upon tho
heroes of criminal novels. Only the
other day terrible illustration occurred
of the actual effect of this gallows litera-
ture upon weak minds. A young man
10 years of age named Westby, shot his
father dead at Nottingham, having first
murdered n little office boy at the Office
of the solicitor where he was employed,
t'merely to strengthen his nerve" and
then took refuge in fowl-house, where
he was captured with revolver in his
possession, with which, as he frankly
owned, he intended, when the police
came, to shoot as many as possible.
The kew to this otherwise ineXplica-
BILE outbreak of homicidal fury was af-
forded by the poor mothers words:
''NIy son was very fond of reading and
would sit for hours at his favorite
amusement, ,studyingp periodicals and sem
sational literature" By this ''sensa-
tional literature" his habits appear to
have been formed, and they were &C.
centric enough. He would not, we are
told, ''allow any one to visit his bed
room, which was entered by an opening
in the floor To this opening he had at
tached trapdoor, with bolts, and ut
night he always fastened himself in.
He had also pulled down the bedstead,
and had been in the habit of sleeping in
hammock slung up from the roof,
while around the walls of the room
were number of pictures of the Life
of Dick Turpin,' etc. A singular col
lection of cuttings from newspapers
was also found in his desk at Mr. Fra
ser's office, including recipes for the
manufacture of guncotton and other ex-
plosives, together with accounts of mar
velous adventures" Here is direct
instance of the effect which the modern
substitutes for the Newgate calendar
have upon weak intellects and crazy
brains. Saturday ReVicD.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1882-02-09
Farmers Alliance of Scotland.

The objects of the Alliance are de-
clared to be to gain the support of and
to enroll members of every county in
Scotland; to carefully consider, and, if
it be q suitable one, promote the passing
of any bill granting tenants legal
right to compensation for improve
ments, fair security of tenure, and great
er freedom for the cultivation of the
soil and disposal of its produce; to OBJ
tain for the tenant such security for the
investment of his capital in the soil as
will stimulate and induce him to inn
prove his cultivation; to obtain the abo-
lition of the laws of entail, hypothec,
primogeniture and all presumptions of
the law in favor of the landlord and
against the tenant; to promote law
simplifying and cheapening the trans
fer of land; to secure to rate-payers
their legitimate share in county govern
ment; to secure the better representa-
ton of tenant-farmers in Scotland; to
promote the further reform of the game
laws, and generally to watch over the
interests of farmers. Times.