The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1882-03-09

q utter, are all that come to me as
look at you and think what might
have been.''
TOO late" He paused, but there
: was no reply.
0 Then a sign and a trophy, he
e holds it up-the long white hair
''This, then, brought you to me
e Too late, Catherine, goodby; for il
e ever we meet again it will rise up as
e a ghost between US and we shall be
!. strangersr'
/ From Grandmother's Scrap Book,
By EFFIE EVERGREEN.
"Boy,why don't you go to schoolF'
''Cause, sir, daddy is afraid that il
l larn everything now, l shan't have
anything to larn ven 1 come to the
'cademy."
"Smart boy, here's a dime for
you" 'Thank ye, sir; that's the
way / gifts my livin." "How?''
"Why, by telin, big yarns to greenys
like you, at dime a pop"
Too LATE.-"My dear SIR" said a
candidate, accosting a sturdy wag
on the day of election, "Fm very
glad to see you" The wag replied,
"You needn't be-Tve voted"
Some mischievous wags, one
night, pulled down turner's sign,
and put it over a lawyers door; in
the morning it reaci: "All sorts of
Turning and Twisting done here"
A negro preacher referring to the
Judgment day in his sermon, said:
Brethren and sisters, in that day
the Lord shall divide the sheep
from the goats: and bress de Lord,
we know which wears de woolr'
"My dear Miss" said an idle
fop, "why have you not taken ad-
vantage of the leap year to get mar
ried?" Because" was the reply "I
am not yet able to earn enough to
support husband"
"Ma," said young lady who had
Just commenced her lessons in
geography, whereabouts shall 1
find the state of matrimony?"-
"Oh," replied the mother, "you will
find that to be one of the United
States"
"Sonney, where is your father?'
"Father's dead, sir" "Have you
any mether?" "Yes, had one, but
she's got married to Joe Duklin, and
doesn't be my mother any longer;
cause she's got 'nough to do to tend
to his young uns."
"Mother sent me-" said little
girl to a neighbor, ''to ask you to
come and take cup of tea with her
this evening" 'Did she say at
what time, my dearP' mo, ma am
she only said she would ask you,
and then the thing would be of her
mind. That was all she said
"Did 1 not give you 1ogging
the other day?' said a schoolmaster
to an urchin. eyes sir" ''Well,
what does the scripture say on the
subject?' 81 don't know, sir, eX-
cept it is that passage which says it
is more blessed to give than to re-
ceive."
A young artist who lives in a
boarding house wants to know how
he can learn to play the violin with
out disturbing the other boarders.
"Soap your bow, young man, soap
your bow, and bathe the strings |
twice day in sweet oil. Then you
can sit up all night and play overt
ures and nobody will mind it."
"Holloa, driver, your wheel is
running round" sang out an urchin
to cart-driver, who was driving
furiously through the street the
other day. Carty pulled up and
looked anxiously, first on one side
and then on the other. "You
needn't look now, it's stoppedr
coolly added the provoking little
rascal
'I say, Sambo, where does Squire
Peters ivep asked a traveller of a
boy, who was grinning and balanc
himself on a rail. "Turn up dat
street, den pass dat pond, den turn
to de right, den to de left, den strike
off do ole farm side of the Marrs
Sheds house, and keep goin' on
where you see Hhillit in de field and
you can't help missin' it,
A Coop REASON N:-"Well, Pat, my
good fellow" said a victorious
general to a brave son of Erin, after
a battle, "and what did you do to
help us gain the victory?" 'Do~
replied Pat: may it please yer honor,
l walked bouldly up to one of the
inimy and cut off his fut." "Cut
off his footl and why did you not
cut off his headP' asked the general.
"Ah, an faith, that was off already"
says Pat.
"Papa," said little urchin to his
father the other day, 81 saw a
printer go down the street just now.
"Did you? How do you know he is
printerp' "Cause 1 do, papa"
''But he might have been carpenter,
a blacksmith, shoemaker, Or"
"Oh no, papa; he was a printer, for
he had no stockings on, the crown
was out of his hat, and his old coat
was all torn; I'm certain he was a
printer"
The originating of new fruits is
deserving of more attention. 1t is
a work that boys and young farm
ers may well be interested in. Rails
ing Seeding of different kinds of
fruit is attended with considerable
interest, as we know not what the
tree is TO bring forth until it bears
fruit. If a new kind of decided
merit is finally obtained, a great
benefit is conferred upon the world.
Said the Hon Marshall p Wilder