The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1882-01-05
Onr nessefi.

She replied, I havs slight touches of it
occasionally.
An ignorant old lady was asked by
minister visiting her, il she had religion
She was the typos first mash but her
mo er came round and stopped the
press.
The person who sits upon the eggs OF
borrowed trouble will eventually hatch
ont the genuine chickens.
Speaking of an officer of the militia
who appeared on parade, young lady
said: He is living chrome
A country paper says: "a child was
run over by wagon three years old,
and cross eyed with pantalets on"
A stranger asked an Andover boy:
Sonny, what is the quickest way to get
to the central depot?' 'Run!' he answer
ed.
Have you cologne?" she asked. "No
man," replied the druggist; II have
no scents at ALL" She said he didn't
look as though he had.
Burdette is writing life of William
Penn. We shall wait to see if he can
resist the temptation to begin the BIZ
ography, 81 take my Penn in hand"
A woman can dress her hair to make
herself look ten years younger, but the
best a man can DO is to partly cover a
bald spot and feel that he is deceiver.
Before his marriage Broughne praised
the artistic manner in which his wife
hinged her hair. Now he complains
OF the cruel manner in which she bangs
his head.
is your father O Christi.n?' said
gentleman to little boy on one occa>
sion, Yes, SIR said the little boy:
but [ believe he has not worked much
att lately
A cold weather conundrum; "Will
the coming man shut the door behind
him ?" Is the latest inquiry. 1t is to be
hoped that he will, for the going man
seldom does.
If you have good sister, love and
cherish her with all your heart. If you
have none, why then love and cherish
the good sister Of some other man with
all your heart.
Alas, that life should be SO short, and
art so very long! Alas, that milk should
be so thin, and butter half so strong!
Alas. that lawyers live and thrive, who
prove that right is wrong!
A man hid in public doorway, and
jumped out and kissed his wife. She
didn't whoop and yell, as he expected,
but remarked, Don't be so bold mister
folks around here know me-
When 1 was young man. says
Billings 1 was always in a hurry to
hold the big end of the log and do all
the lifting; now am old, seize hold
of the small end and do all the grunt-
ing
a Peoria topper justifes himself in
This manner: II am fond OF long life.
JovlaIty and good feeling promote long
life. Whisky engenders iovialty and
good feeling. Hence l cultivate whis~
ky"
An old maid, not attractive, recently
read in temperance lodge an original
poem, entitled, The lips that touch
liquor shall never tonch mine," and the
young men present gave her three
cheers.
An eye-opener.-When girl who has
encouraged young man for about two
years suddenly tells him that she can
never be more than sister to him he
can for the first time see the freckles
on her nose.
The story that o Louisville girl re.
fused to marry lover whose breath
smelt of whisky is another proof that
man who doesn't carry roasted coffee
III his pockets can never hope to have
an Hon. before his name,
Anegro was suspected of surreptitous-
ly meddIing with his neighbours fruit,
and being caught in a garden by moon
light nonplussed the detectors by rails
Ing his eyes, clasping his hands and
piously excIaiming: Good heavens. dis
yere darkey can't go nowhere to pray
without bein' 'sturbed.