The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1882-11-02
The Baby Show.
we suppose there was great tlme
at the Rock county fair, at GAINESVILLE,

we suppose there was great tlme
at the Rock county fair, at Janesville,
oyer the baby show. Four editors were
to be the judges, Coe, of Whitewater.
Ingersoll of Beloit, and Smith and No
Ian, of GAINESVILLE. Men of experience
knew that the committee would have
terrible time, as they are all moderately
young men, who have an eye that would
be more apt to wander towards the
handsome mammas than to the darling
babies, and bets were freely offered at
Janesville that the baby belonging to
the handsomest mother would get the
premium. Coe got scared at the last
minute and wrote to the fair secretary
that business would call him to Elk
horn, and he appointed a young bank
er named Jackman as his proxy. We
learn that the committee got together
and had the babies brought in. Nolan,
the young bachelor editor. tried to hold
one of the babies so as to look at its
upper teeth, but he held it wrong side
up, SO he could look down on the teeth,
and the mother of the baby broke into
the room and took it away from him.
He said the baby did not have any up
per teeth, when Smith insisted that no
babies ever had any upper teeth. Jack
man said it was cows that didn't have
upper teeth, and babies always did.
Ingersoll was in favor of having the
babies walk match around the room,
and was hitching up the long dress of
one of them, SO it could walk, as it lay
across his lap, when the mother, who
was looking through the window.
thought maybe the baby needed atten-
ton, came in the room with a piece of
linen cloth folded three cornered, and
gave it to Ingersoll. He says it was as
big as hotel napkin, and thinking by
the peculiar scarf pin on it that she had
presented him with a scarf, he put it on
under his vest. The rest of the COM
mittee laughed at MIN. and told him
what it was, and he said he thought all
the time there was an Oscar Wilde odor
about it. The committee finally got
into quarrel over the prize baby as to
whether the recipient was boy or girl,
and while they were sorting over the
babies and looking to see which was the
prettiest, they got the babies mixed up
so there is good deal of doubt as to
whether the owners got the right babies
back. Mr.. Jackman had on lavender
pants, and the rest of the committee
made him hold the babies, and he got
mad and said they did it on purpose,
and that was the last time he would
ever serve on committee to please
anybody. The committee returned a
sealed verdict, because they were
afraid to face the mothers, and an
nounced their decision, and while the
envelope containing the verdict was
going to the Office of the secretary, the
committee all got out of the room and
lit out of town, except Nolan. He re-
manned to write up the affair for his pa
per, and when the mothers came in
after the children there was one miss
ing, and she was going to claim Nolan,
he was SO small, but he swore he was
over twenty years old, and showed her
his moustache. and finally they found
the missing baby in pigeon hole,
where Jackman had filed it away when
Coe showed the best Judgment of any
of the committee, in lying out of it,
and staying at home. There is no set
of men on earth that can give satisfac-
ton as judges at baby show, and the
experience of this committee should be-
a warning to men never to serve in that
capacity, never.-Pscks San.