The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1882-04-05
PLEASANTRIES.

Simples says his wife is a splendid sample
Of the opposite SEX
Columbus made the egg stand, but we
shall never know who the great discoverer
was who first made the egg nogg.
"My daughter exclaimed fashionable
mother, ais innocence itself. You can't say
anything in her presence that viii make her
blush"
Great truths are often said in the fewest
words. For instance. when the Indian sat
down on the wssps' nest he remarked:
"Hesp hell ll'
There are plenty of men who paint and
eorsets." "No; they use something else, in
getting tight"
1t is said that at learning toswim women
are gu cker than men. This is probably be-
cause the custom of wearing trains has
learned then to kick out gracefully.
1t is because he has heard that close at
tention to small things makes the success
full man, that certain young clerk in
this city takes such good care of his NOUS
tacbe.
A mother advised her daughter, who was
going to a party, to oil her hair, and tainted
away when that candid damsel replied:
''Oh, no, ma; it is so apt to spoil the gentle
mems veSts.'
Paris humor: They ssere just married,
and with party of friends stopped at a
Gypsy's camp He approached the fortune
teller and asked, allow many children will
l have2" "One," ne was told. A moment
after the young wife asked the same ques-
., oh uyoc rornu1icod two
Henderson says he doesn't understand
whv they want to remove the post office
building now that it almost built. Fender
son read in the paper that the building
was "being pushed to completion" He
wants to know where completion is, and
how in time they are going to push the
post office.
There is q great deal of charity of this
sort in the world. A gentleman said:-"I
have Just bought a new dress for poor wo-
man and sent it to her." allow very like
you, and how very kind of you," was tie re-
joinder. "and pray who was the poor woman
you made so happy2" at was my wife,
was the dry reply.
Nothing" said an impatient husband,
$50 reminds me of Balaam and his ass, as
two women stopping in church and OBJ
structing the way. to indulge in their ever
lasting talk" "Bat you forget, my dear, "
returned his wife, meekly, shat it was the
angel who stopped the way, and Bslaam
and his ass who complained of it."
They were oat sleighing. "Gussie, dear, -
said she, as she leaned her tender cheek on
his manly checked ulster, ''why are these
snowAakes like your mustache?" This
pleased him, even to have it noticed. 81
don't know, pet" he murmured innocently
"why are they2" because they are slow
coming down" He drove with both hands
after this.
Puek's editor discloses his experience by
sadly remarking: ''There is nothing in
this wide world that makes young man
crazier than. after arriving at party with
young lady, whom he has got there a:
considerable expense, to have some bald
headed individual get her off into corner
and talk to her all the evening on the pc
culiarities of the Gulf stream.
A leading citizen of Dallas, one of the
most intelligent property owners in the
town, was reading newspaper in Texas
Siftings' Office yesterday, when he came
across the paragraph, THE admission OF
Dakota is a forgone conclusion at Wash
ington, "whereupon he said: 81 can't keep
up with the run of the Washington scan
dale, there are so many of them. What did
Dakota admit9-Siftings."
Old Dir. johnson once in q while gave an
opponent an answer which was as fatal a:
the hug of grizzly bear. One day gen.
tleman not very top heavy was discussing
the immortality of animals. Greatly, sir,
he said, ~when l see a very sensible dog
don't know what to think" Gruff old John.
son tzrned on him and replied: 'True, sir
and when see q very foolish fellow like
you dent know what to think either"
Mrs. Loveapple bought new dress. II
was poalt de sole of delicate grass green
To match the dress she had pair of boots
They were also poult de sole of delicate
grass-green. Inspired with the idea Of
pleasing her husband, she daintily lifted the
hem of her garment, and Displayed foot
worthy of Cinderella. "What do you think
of that, dear7" she tenderly asked her liege
lord. "Iamensel" inRocently responded
the partner of her life.
"Good morning. Fogg," said. Brown,
br;sxly. "How did you like the opera last
nicht3" 20, $3.50" answered Fosg. mood.
ly; nothing striking about it, excepting
the drum-stieks." Come, come" returned
Bro vn. abe serious. Didnt you tiink that
bravIlra passage with pizzieato andappogia-
tura embellishments were lovely7" "Guess
1 didn't see it." answered Fogg. as before;
''there was only feathers and flowers and
things on the one in front of me-" "What
are you talking about, man?7 exclaimed
Brown. That girls hat, of csslrse.
Wasn't your" ''Good morning" said
Brown, as be turned the eorner.-Puck-