The times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1882-1897, 1882-04-21

"Ihe man who is happy Is rich," says
Peter Cooper. Uncle Peter, send on
your ducats and take our happiness for
the next six months. We want to know
how it will seem to be rich and misera-
BILE.
The first cat taken to Gunnison CITY
sold for $16, but the first man in that
town who killed cat was presented
with purse of $50. There's no show
in this country for the cat to get ahead.
A Milwaukee girl wants $4,000 dam
ages because she wasn't quite ready to
be kissed when man kissed her. He
ought to have blown horn or rung
bell and given her thirty seconds warm
ing.
Herr Karl Gehmia, of Berne, after a
series of experiments extending over
several years, has succeeded in produc-
ing artificial mothcr-of-pearl, undstin-
guishable in every respect from the nat
ural article. 1t can be nodded in any
shape, produced in any color. is imper-
vious to heat and cold, and it's price will
be much less than that of ordinary moth
er-of-pearl.
A physician in Dayton, o., in making
out death certificate, headed it "Mt.
Gomery county" The Dayton Demo
crat says he has lived in Montgomery
county all his life, and has invariably
spelled the name in this original man.
ner.
1t is stated that tho pistol now in use
in the British army and navy is likely to
be discarded in favor of weapon with
quadruple cartridge, which will yield
the advantage of easier and more rapid
loading, no escape of gas, and less LA
bility to accident.
A countryman was pulled from the
track in front of a moving train at
Chattanooga, and narrowly escaped
with his life. A basket of eggs he car
ried on his arm was broken during the
excitement, and he was much incensed
over the matter, so much SO that he
tried to swear out a warrant against his
deliverer.
German fat cattle must fare badly if
they are fed upon such food as certain
powdered meat lately largely adver-
tised in Berlin. On the compound be-
ing analysed by Munich chemist, not
a particle of true meat was to be found,
and the only animal substance contained
proved to Decentralization.
A Rockland mother went to the door
and called the heir into the house. "You
weren't sliding on Sunday, were you,
Freddiep" she reproachfully exclaimed.
mo, mother" replied the youthful
Freddie, proudly; II cannot tell lie
was sliding on the ice."
At a recent meeting of the Rhode Is
land Historical Society, ut Providence,
the announcement was made that thirty
acres of land. covering the historic site
Of the old French camp, had been Sc
cured by citizen and would be given
to the city as park. The site is the
highest land in the city, and is very elig-
IDLY situated.
The Bi-Centennial Association of Phil
adelphia, is negotiating with the owners
of the Letitia Penn house, for the pur-
chase of that structure, which is soon to
be demolished. The building, which
was constructed in 1896, issaid to be the
oldest in Philadelphia, and if the associ-
alton secures it, it will be erected in
Paramount Park.
Paradise Valley, in San Diego county,
California, seems to deserve its name,
since it Yields all manner of fruits. The
apple, orange, lime, lemon, fig, olive,
guava, peach, pear, grape. strawberry,
apricot. etc, flourish there. Some
brown Turkish figs grown there meas
ured four inches in length and six inches
in circumference.
Once upon a time woman died, and
rs the mourners were carrying her to
the grave they tripped against stump
and let the coffin fall. She revived, hav-
ing only been i'm deep trance. Two
years after she really died, and as they
and neared the same stump the discon-
ISOLATE widower sobbed: STEADY, boys!
Steady there! Be very, very careful!
A gentleman in Paris owns n hand
some and valuable dog named BIS
marck." He recently received a note
from the German embassy inviting him
to remove the name from the dogs col
lar and to cease calling the animal by
it, under pain of prosecution, upon the
ground that the patronymic belongs ex-
clusively to the German chancellor, and
the embassy can not allow it to be pub
licly applied to dog.
EDery provision Cd Natur may De wise,
but doan see why baby should suffer
so much in cuttin' teeth. A dog doan
hab no truble, neder does coon, but
Natur gives fits to de baby. And dis, de
preachers tell me, is on account OBJ de
political trickery OBJ Adam. Use glad
dat he was counted out oh de garden OBJ
Eden. Ebery body dat walks de flo
wild teethin' chile is natural enemy
ter dat man.-Little Rock Gazette.
The golden chalice in the principal
Catholic church at Carlsruhe, Germany,
has been sold to Baron Rothschild, of
Frankfort, for $4,000. 1t is beautiful
work of art, and is ornamented with
precious stones. 1t bears the date 1908.
This chalice was given to the church by
the late grand duke of Baden, and has
now been sold. with the permission of
the bishop, in order to defray debt on
the church.
An Incident in Atlanta.
A subscriber at Atlanta says: A lady,