News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1882-05-11
THE p, O. DELIVERY CLERK.
How He Appears to Man in Texas


The postofice delivery clerk is an Off
cial paid by the government of the
United States to make the travelling
public, and those who have not got lock
boxes paid for quarterly, in advance,
feel that there are worse things than not
getting the letters they expected. The
worse things are the delivery clerk him
self and the manner in which he treats
the anxious inquirer. There is no i'm
petuous haste about the movements of
the delivery clerk, but, instead, there is
calm repose of manner and leisurely
disregard of time, as he turns to his
pigeon holes to look for a letter for you,
and, becoming interested in the reading
of postal card, forgets all about your
presence.
We heard man say, the other day,
that the average delivery clerk is of a
retiring disposition-he will retire be-
hind desk for half an hour to finish
reading the catastrophe of Seaside
Library" novel, while the unlettered
public howl like foghorns outside, and
pound on the sides of the window with
their sticks and umbrellas.
The postofice delivery clerk is really
a very mild and inoftensive creature
when he is dead, or discharged. In his
official capacity, however, he is not ex-
cessively communicative or oppressively
polite. He never comes out of his win
dow to chat with a friend, or to point
out to stranger the way to the court
house. There are several characteristics
and eccentricities of the delivery clerk
that may be worth mentioning. He
will look at the inquiring one in pre-
occupied sort of way, and when the
| latter states that his name is J. T. Will
son, ard asks if there are any letters for
him, the clerk will go into reverie over
about forty letters that he will fish out of
the W box. After he examines them
all and has had ten minutes of a Joint
discussion with the first assistant mail
ing clerk, with regard to whether the
second throw that Smith made last night
was two SKIES and three, or two threes
and six, he will then look over a few
more letters, until he comes to one that
looks as if it might fit the man outside,
and coming to the window. says, "You
are sure your name isn't J. P. Williams,
are you ?" as if Wilson might have lost
or mislaid his name and unconsciousIy
picked up some other mans name by
mistake, as one might exchange hat
or umbrella. When the man assures
him that his name, as we'll as he can
remember, is Wilson, the clerk looks
disguised and disappointed because he
is again baked in disposing of some OF
his stale literature.
The most exasperating specimen OF
delivery clerk is the one who has the
reputation of having a remarkable
memory. He remembers, or pretends
to remember, the names of all the letters
in all the pigeon holes, from A. to z.
and we never saw a man yet who
wouldn't doubt the accuracy of his
statement when, without looking
o,
"Naw, nothing for that name"
That the delivery clerk should have a
gloomy and cherries disposition is not
to be wondered at. He has much to
annoy and prejudice him against the
people, who seem to have deplorable
and Unsuitable yearning for letter OF
even one cent circular. He is worried by
all sorts of unreasonable people. There
is the drummer who wants any letters
that may come for him during the next
ten days, forwarded to him at Chicago
the man who wants to know if letter
mailed now will go east ON the = go !; the
boy who mailed letter without stamp
and wants it back six men who forgot
their box keys and want their mail
handed to them the woman who knows
there must be letter for her and asks
the clerk to "look again ;" the country,
man who gets angry, and wants the
clerk to " come out on the sidewalk fol
just two minutes" because the clerk
wants to charge him six cents on an in
sufficiently prepaid letter, and the
colored female who does not get letter,
on an average, once in two years, but
who comes every Monday morning, and
inquiries, not only for letters for her
self, but for all the cook and wash
ladies in the ward she lives in.
Taking all this into consideration, the
delivery clerk deserves credit for not
being more intensely sour and painfully
ferocious than he is.