The Osceola times., 1882-04-29

that they were sent into tne woriu 10 en-
i;obten IL through the columns OF the
newspapers. He is a kindergarten for
vealy yong men and cranky old fellows
who think the newspaper world would
cease TO exist should they fail to contri.
butte to its support from their storehouse
of general knowledge, brilliant ideas and
classic lore. He is also hot house for
the propagation of young. compositors.
He is expected to know the name, ma
tiyity. date of birth and death Of every
body. from a constable TO president,
and all the officials and dignitaries OF the
world. especially in Russia, Turkey China
and Japan-which he does not know,bya
large majority. Some innocent people
are under the impression that writers
prepare their manuscript correctly, as
the articles appear. Not so, my son. In
many cases, il an article should appear
as written, the author would refuse to
father it, and never make another effort.
But they must be encouraged, and 30
| their productions are trimmed up in the
office and made presentable.
There are great variety OF contrl
butors to the newspaper. First, there
| is the classical writer. lie is always on
the lookout for obsolete and uncommon
words and phrases, never heard or seen
except in the most complete unabridged
dictionaries. When he has collected
number of such words, Re goes to work
aud writes an article around them-that
is, adapts the subject to the words. He
can't write half column article without
introducing the names of lot OF old
mummies, who were peirided thousand
wears before the advent of the Saviour,
whether they be gersnane 10 the subject
or not. He provides himself with bio
graphical dictionaries, with the names,
professions and achievements OF the old
fellows, all classified and arranged, and
then turns himself loose oil them. If he
fails to spell them correctly in copying
them, it is all right, for he knows the
proof-reader is bound to look them up
and get them right in the paper or .oses
his job. He may write 1t Johannis
Schneider, but after good deal OF worry
and guessing it is found to mean julius
Cesar.
"Then there's the minister who sends
in mere skeleton of sermon, page
of which looks like the top of tea box
covered with Chinese hyeroglyphics, all
disconnected, with Scripture and proper
names written in dots and dashes, and
the whole affair complete enigma.
However, he knows it will be all right,
and that the printers and proof-reader
will unravel it, no matter if they are mt
subjects for the mad house before they
get through with 1t.
Then, there is the local reporter.
Well, he is a good fellow, and means
. well; he has troubles of his own. But II
he spells mans name four different
+ ,,a hos a
knows the proof-reader will drop every
, thing, rush around, find directory or
something else, and fix it all right
= before it goes into the paper. Also
comes the statistical fiend, with his
figures all presenting the same appear
, ance, he not having time TO cast up his
columns for totals, knowing the proof
. reader is bound to fix them up. There
is also the country correspondents, the
, young poet. the scientist and the lin.
: guistical Smart Aleck, who can't write
: five lines without scattering bits Of Latin,
, French, Spanish, etc, to show that he
has been there. 1t matters not whether
, he gets his foreign words in right or not.
i the proof reader must scratch around and
get ever, thing right somehow, or the
next day will hear from. the powers in
, the sanctum. In fact, TO be success,
the proof reader must be an animated
r encyclopedia, with the patience OF Job
and the endurance of adamant--but he
i is not, and hence his troubles"
1 "Well, papa, he has plenty Of time TO
!. fix everything and correct all the mis-
r takes of the writer's and printers, has he
o not?"
' "Oh, yes. That is, taking an article
!, | which has required the author half a
o day to write, the proof reader has about
n twenty minutes in which 10 correct it
q and put in shape, with the foreman bob
: bing around like hen on hot ashes,
a hurrying things up, calling for this and
that matter, and crying out: what's
the matter with that proof Hurryit up,
or it'll be left outl"
y "Well, the proof reader must be well
g paid for all that lard work and vexation,
! isn't he?"
h "Oh, certainly. In some Offices he
gets as much as Sl2 week and in some
d he gets more. AT 4 o'clock in the morn
G ing he goes home with his head buzzing
8 like beehive, and feeling like freight
train had run yer him; then the next
e day he goes do Sn to the office trying to
J, feel resigned in expectation Of the q. Il.
(which means the grand bounce), for
g failing TO properly edit some fellows hog
: wash But he doesn't live long, and his
= martyrdom on earth secures him soft
place 10 the next world. Let's take q
: street car and go home"