davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
Taking Advice,

From the Detroit Free Press.
There was a man at the Central mars ct
yesterday who looked the perfect specimen
of greenhorn. His hands were large and
red, his clothes didn't fit, and his cowhide
boots had Just been rubbed down with fried
meat gravy. He was looking at everything
with open mouth when a couple of young
men who had been driven in by the rain
commenced to guy him. One of them asked
him if he was on bridal tour, and the other
insisted on calling him Shakespeare. Liberal
offers were made for his coat and boots, and
an attempt was made to secure him for q
lecturing tour through the county.
The young man took everything iu calm,
matter of fact way until "a gentleman came
along and said to him:
"See here, my friend, why do you stand
these insults ?"
"Are they insulting me ?"
"Of course they are"
"And should resent it ?"
Certainty youShould."
'"ghen will. didn't know exactly what
! to do, but thought I'd hold on for advice. If
you say go in and slam 'em' I'll do So"
II would" ... l.. (.
"Then will"
In the coolest kind Of a way he removed
his coat and rolled it up and laid it down,
placed his hat on the bundle, and without q
word of warning he waded in and knocked
one off the end of the bench and the other
clear over it, and then gave each lift with
bis cowhide. He won a complete victory
inside Of two minutes without receiving a
scratch, and as he p t on the coat he said to
his adviser:
"Much obliged for your kindness, stranger
Il that's the way you do here in Detroit III
have six months sickness on my knuckles
for the next chap who asks if they had to
hire hall to finish my boots in
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30

A. Always be civil. however businesslike
and importunate you may deem it q be.
5. Never think you have done wrong
because debtor gets angry. HIS anger,
under civil treatment, shows that ne does not
intend to pay. This you might as we'll know
early as late.
s, Show quite as firm resolution to have
the money on your tenth call as on any
previous one, or else it would have been
better if you had not made it.
z. Never leave a debtor without his setting
time when he thinks he can pay, and never
fail to be ON hand at the time set H. tE
5. As between yourself and an employe,
let the most business like of the two take the
dun. .-.+'# h
9. Suggest installments. Shame the
debtor into making an arrangement to pay
something every week or every month. If
not $40, then 81, or 81. 1t will convince him
that you have set to work in earnest to get
the money. . ..''
10. If a debtor gets angry, or has won out
your patience, threat to attach his salary
may be effective, not so much that he is
likely to fear that you will get the money
that way as that he will be anxious that the
affair shall not come to the knowledge of his
employer.
II. A similar effect may be Produced by
saying you intend to place the bill in the
hands of lawyer, particularly if you men.
ton q lawyer whom he hates, or who has q
reputation for hsrrassing debtors.
= IL. Drop iuto a debtors fayorite haunts
It will make him feet very uneasy, especially
if you don't hesitate to ask him politely, but
plumply, for your money on the occasion.
This may often happen after he has displayed
roll Of bills.
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
obey the Law without inquiring why it is

obey the Law without inquiring why it is
made so.'
!. But st last the people and especially the
people Of Ireland, are enquiring why these
land laws were made so. And the people
here would be ehquiring too, only the 5000
newspapers are now the people. And it will
be large percentage indeed if we suppose
that ten out Of every thousand are got up
for the public good, while the other 800 live
only to subserve the interests of their owners.
II we find that the owners interest is best
subserved by serving the rich, who are able
to pay them, then we have master-key to
the present deplorable condition of the
United StatesssE <1
'We want to bondage the nation" cry the
thieves. Help US, you man Of paper and ink,
and you shall have modicum. We want to
possess the lands and the mines. You come
in along with your big daily sheet and help
us and you shall have a share And in they
go. But it is melancholy TACT that they
don't get half as much of the plunder as
automatically belongs to them. For without
their help there would be neither bondagingg
nor stealing OF land in this repnblic. IF those
same 600 papers struck tomorrow for higher
wages they would get it. Or if they we're,
refused or driven to revolt they ceuld drive
the whole brood of grabbers and bondagers
out of the country 10 a months time. Reflect
on that brother thinkers, or mixers or tinkers,.
or whatever you choose to call yourselves.
We have an affection for you and can we
better show it than by pointing out to you
the way you can make hundred dollars
where now you don't make more than ten. Z
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30

never read it. am not so sure about that,
nor is he, fancy, so sure, now that 1t has has
gone alreadyinto cheap edition. But In
this he was right-that until the masses OF
the people come to interest themselves is such
questions the present unjust inequality IN the
distribution of wealth must continue. For
that the few get SO much while they DO so
little, while the many get SO little while they
do SO much, and solely becausethe many DO
not think. The great majority of us can read
and write and we boast of what we call
popular intelligence But what would the
birds think of us if they could think? just
about what we would think of the birds III
we saw one crow sitting amid more grain
than he could eat in thousand years, while
lot of half starved ones were shaving
themselves to death to add to his pile.
But equalization does not necessarily mean
a leveling down. The true equalization OF
social conditions will be a leyeling up.
The state of socisty that would ensue il
wealth were distributed in anything like
normal equality would give far more comfort
and enjoyment and freedom than the posses
sion of great riches in this. Is it better to be
the possessor of bottle of water when those
around you are parched and maddened with
thirst, or to rest where never falling fountains
flow, and no one is concerned about getting
water? -.
1t may seem wild dream to those who
have never thought of the enormous wastes
which the present constitution of society
entails, but to those who have thought OF
them, it seems but sober fact that there is
no reason in the nature of things why we
should not all be rich and all have leisure ;
no reason why any one should refrain from
marrying for fear that he would not be able
to support family or have the slightest fear
that that family could not get an easy living
if he were taken away: no reason why every
woman should not have piano and time to
play it, and every man library and time to
read it; no reason why even the poorest
should not live in as good houses and have
all the comforts and conveniences and elegan-
cies that only the richest have now.
Who would do the work? The forces OF
nature would do the work. We have just begun
to utilize them, yet even If Invention were to
no further 60, all this would be possible.
And the same faculty which has enabled
man to realize, in so many respects, more
than the most daring Imagination dreamed
will, if he but use it, also enable him tc
realize that dream of a Golden Age which
has always haunted him.
HENRY GEORGE.
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
Rules for Dunning.

l. Never give the idea that you called
because you happened to be in the neighbor.
hood.
2, Never plead that you are in absolute
need OF the money.
8. Never explain why you want the
money further than by general phrase as to
meet our outstanding bills. The debtor is
usually an expert at showing man how he
can get along without money. He will worst
you in argument, and if you should lose your
temperit is an excuse to him why he should
not pay you.
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
What's the Difference.
HENRY GEORGE.

Two neighbors met to have talk. whats
the difference" said one, between highway
man and sneak thief?"!
WELL" said the other, "about the same
difference between land thit f in Ireland and
land thief here at home-onlya more SO"
Chow doyou make that out ?"
"Why, the first is the heir of, a highway
man, and the second is a direct sneak thieI
in his own right"
But which do you regard as the greatest
scoundre ?"
''In that respect it is hard to tell. Il seems
to be hang choice between them. And
generally, they ought to hang together. But
of the two give methe highwayman. He is
several points above the sneak thief"
''How can that be, if both rob about the
same?"
"WelI there is this in it; The old high
wayman when be went over to Ireland, had
to give and take hard knocks. Faith, it was
no child's play when they net the Gallow.
glasses A good many OF those same highway
men got possession unier the ground instead
of on it. But our sneak thief! Just see him
going round and round, lying aud telling lies
at all our public meetings until he talks
himself into Washington. Then it is harvest
time with him. MSney is streaming round
him to purchase the commodity of votes.
He has one to dispose of, and he makes a
beginning. Then he and his fellow sneak s
assume that they are the United States-thar
they are above the coustitution-that they
can pass laws rhat never can be repealed
And so they set to work -"
"Hold on! Hold on! Surely they don't
say that. They never sAid it, and if they did
say it nobody would believe them."
"You are right. They don't say it, but
they do it. In something like this Way
Whereas, The Union Pacific Railroad
company has presented map showing the
ste>aud the great utility OF railroad to draw
closely together the east and west of this our
great country. And ~.
Whereas, They have presented map of
alternate sections forty miles wide on each
side of the road, half Of such lands to be
disposed Of in aid of its construction and the
other half retained for settlement under the
laws of the United States. And
Whereas, The said company are willing to
issue their bonds for s65, ,0eo, 900 at par if the
United States only guarantees the due pay.
ment of their interest. And \ T.: X
Whereas, The company agrees to give a
first mortgage on the entire road and rolling
stock, which amply secures the United States
for the loan, not of its money but of its
credit to the said company. Therefore, \ II
Be it enacted by the 37th congress of the
United States-the president concurring, that
those demands of the said company be, and
are hereby enacted intoGa law that cannot be
repealed by any succeeding congress whatever
which shall be the true meaning Of this act.
And SO it is fixed and 50 it is finished.
Blackstone in tracing the structure of
British land laws, and the foundation they
rest on exclaims: 1T is well the people
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
salad for the Conceited.
IFrom the Taunton Gazette.l

From tne Iaunton GazetUej 6s
OF all eonceits that haunt man,
And hedge themselves about him,
There never was one since the race began,
That seemed SO poor and thin to scan,
AS the thought that the world was run on a
plan
That it couldn't get on without him.
A conceit as old as the world is this,
And quite correct in Adam;
For it wouldn't be strange that Eve might
miss
The only man who could give the kiss
Which settled the fact of connubial bliss
Between himself and madame. n
But times have changed, we are forced to be-
lieve; -E
And Adams are getting more plenty;
And the chance to-day that a modern Eve
Would go far out of her way to grieve,
Should her lord and master take his leave,
Would scarcely be one in twenty. >
And though you deem the matter rife, :
For keeping in recollection,
'Tis not alone the comforted wife,
Who drops your memory out Of her life
But oblivion's manipulated knife
Will cut In every direction.
And, friend, should you entertain whim
That your loss the world might cripple,
We grieye your pride Of heart to dim,
But the place you fill is SO very slim,
You might 90 under and cease to swim,
Without creating ripple.
Now, outef this ''conundrum" springs;
"Whefefore this fuse and Labor"
''This working so hard for material things,
That,are more than likely to take on wings,
While possession no more happiness brings
To you than your poorer neighbour"
We give it up, and pass it along,
AS have they who lived before us,
We try as did they, to come cat strong,
But things sometimes go fearfully wrong,
And we all of. us sing the same old song
With but little change in the chorus.
May not this folly of human oonceit
Be part of the plan eternal
That man should struggle with weary feet,
In weak endeaVors to win heat
OF race which shall never be complete
Till we reach the goal super1al?
Then sound your trumpet and blow your horn
And make the most of youf merits;
There's many man who contriyes to adorn
A position for which he never was born,
And the world will treat that one with seorr
Who's content with what he inheritS.
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
STRAYED>OR STOLEN.

It is wise bank cashier who takes nc
vacation.
A corn dodger-a man whe avoids wearing
tight boots.
The present chief signal officer is constantly
Hszsn the weather.
The proper way to warm the house is to
keep the cellar cOaled.
Much "adieu" about nothing A party of
young ladies at the corners.
A Virginia man owns a heR that sings. One
simple lay day is her average.
If one dog can be placed on a scent, how
many dogs can be placed on trade dollar
A Colorado sheriff undertook to arrest a
cinnamon bear last spring and is in bed yet.
The matchmaker can't stf)rd to do cash
business because he makes all his profits on
time.
Veuuor predicts that during The next three
months the Atlantic Ocean will be full OF
cold waves.
Girls are more gorgeous than men. They
are willing to make match With fellow
twice their size.
a New York girl has made $15O 900 by az
oil transaction. A eau of it exploded and
killed her rich aunt.
The Cincinnati Gazette has department
headed "What is Going On in Society"
: Perhaps it is paint and powder.
We sneer at the Siamese for wor, hiping the
+ elephant; but think of the money that is
paid here annually just see it.
1t is estimated that 60 900 Americans will
go to Europe next SIMMER, and many times
co. 600 Europeans will come to America.
Boston firt on receiving an ofsr of mar.
risge rushed into the hall and called up
stairs, "Mother, am i engaged to anybody
now?"
Bismarck is growli because Berlin
butcher named sausage after him. The
count can't appreciate that kiyi.nd of com
phment.
Silver dollars with holes in them are pain
fully numerous, but they're not half so pain
fully numerous as holes without any silver
dollars around them.
Squaws in Austin. Nevada, wear mems
boots, and pay two bits for a shine at the
bootblack ,ng stands. They care nothing fol
the right of franchise.
'"That's lovely necktie you have on" she
remarked. ''Glad you ike it; l thought il
rather neat myself eyes, it would look Sc
well in the silk patchwork quilt. 1 an
making" : .,- ,-g-
A shrewd lady who had recovered from I
decline was asked what cured her. II stopped
worrying and begsn to laugh that is all,
was the reply. The best possible kind Q
medicine. 4 Es9'
The pine forests of the north are said to b
shrinking. When we think of some OF th'
people who 60 there every summer, we don,
wonder that the pine forests shrink. A cas-
iron man would shrink.
The Labor enquirer., 1882-12-30
Welcome. .

We extend an Invitation to an gar gar
friends and those interested in the cause 2
tozdrop into The ENoU1RER office at any y
time and feel at home. As soon % as !, :,
can be managed, we will have on nm me 3 ~ !,
the leading labor journals Of the Y I nlisp s.
States, and their inspection viii alsays ~ z :
freely be granted our visitors o
and see us. - g
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26
A. Noted Farm.

Among the famous farms Of Port.
age county, j. the Olin farm, near
Rayennn, consisting Of 2j0 acres in
the valley Of the Cuyahoga river.
This farm has been continuously
cropped in grain for over forty
years, and is yearly growing more
productive, fact entirely due to
clover, Tor aside from the small
amount Of manure made by Il small
drove OF cattle, no commercial fer
tilizers have been used. Within a
few years the cattle have been in
creased so that the stock of the farm
nov consists of fifty head OF Short
. Horns. The proceeds Of tie farm
this year were 2,4O0 bushels of wheat,
5000 of corn. COO of potatoes, 800
OF oats. and large amount Of clover
seed. This fall over loo acres have
been put in wheat, with a promising
show. This brings up q curious fact,
and shows how little soil and its
character were understood wears ago.
in 1887 my father came from Yer
mont 10 this State. and in quest OF a
farm visited the one above. The
price was put At So per acre, but the
soil was objected 10 IS lacking
strength, and a clay farm was bought
4 dozen miles 10 the northwest, at
the rate OF $50 per acre. The former
is now held above SiCO, and the other
could possibly be bought for $50 per
acre. Great as is the difference in
value, the clay farms, under the new
system Of rotation OF crops and fire.
qucnt plowiDgs under Of clover. are
rapidly gaining ground upon the
sandy lands, aud now seem likely 10
even surpass them in productiveness.
IL has taken the clay farmers n long
time to learn bow. but the stiff clays
are now becoming like gardens.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26

high state of cultivation. What they
do supply is all aegerIy seized and
appropriated by nearby gardeners
aud truckers, and at rates with which
farmers cannot compete. With an
efficient system Of street cleaning
this supply might be largely increas-
cd, but that period is as yet some
distance off. Commercial fertilizers
have more or less value, but are un-
certain as TO good results, and al.
ways certain To cost heavily. They
are evidently more valuable TO their
makers than To anybody else, though
under the new system Of State in
spection the chances for Wholesale
swindling are hopefully diminishing.
Nothing can be predicted in advance
as TO the results Of special fcrtil-
lzer, and hence thousands OF dollars
spent in this way bring no visible re-
turn. The common farmer, then. is
obliged TO look at home for his fer
tilizers. lie must have them or sink.
Stock is the best recourse, and dairy
animals in particular.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26

ssr .Ir lhs.. r.iel.I Csl.,.lsI.,. ..a ,r.-....


ioE aIi tho.o PaiHfuI CurnplRtHts s-d Ws-'-sssss
ssssHsraon "a ssr hs-t g. ssaie Pessirttat.
ltv..., ,l.Ts sutirsly to worst f.Ff e f CON-.
I'slats ~ crsFiau trvlir- irannHas'isn srl trrs
ton. FAILING sui nisIsassrrsi,''. AL 80 srs.H'a'
SPINAL wssSussz, hB is IastlcviAriy Sta.ir! 70 tie
tta~-o q IEfs.
u v.il G,sfoivs sni sIrsi t54fs frr ~ ~ sa' IN
ssFy stage - davstatFr,ut. 1lsa tl=rfg - - n
ssfes iarnafs tsrsis eiYsee - rs'yFf~s'y ifz
IL fhirt1s-. fatu~ney dssAfogsa5 craving
Tor 81 u1asnts Hai rrrr~s vsat-sss % tast0rrsfh
IL caFts E'1atirg. issisrhs-, N,fvaus rrasfragf6-
General pstg'y Sis<. lefzsseas. peiTtsslsn All Loo
gssti0s.
That fss'i-g ~ barring so-ru rsn-in~ res ,-sf.i
ami ia~. a-'l3 isflsayal sfIaartiy rsfsi ..a
tvti 81 iiiars ani unsT 81 slf-r tsi 70
hs-sarF with Ui- less tist g-ursrn iir~ fer % r
Ter the ~sr~of s.'nsy CasIflssts q ssasf beG '.s
Cora0rr-f.iis rss..-rafs =
LYDIA y. IisisiiAg's yrr;-- s-:.r CCT.
rot NJ b fsUFaFri - - aifi O.. '.,sg Lrsz ss
Lynn Uses. T.i-1 g. sif l-ifl-s:sr - tsuflrfrLI
n t1s fsr5 - piis. s's7 intss firm - laf 7r
Fyrsi.t u p-r, e. r~v iaE ~ o,'lssr. - Ir hsh
frsslyahsu,Fs sii letters - tf.gairy. tri ~ If T.
ist. Addgvsa - above Esvs.s4 .Nss Ez.-r.
- fsHs{i- f'i,a;d - ~fihc.t NM T.'.--s s-.-s
fiyua F.f-A 1t-J ,ura court si.t- ..1-.--s 90
AMI tot. .iJ..r ~ ~ live = es1'afs~ Ivr
FE- sold by Nil Drrrrtvfs. -Fn
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26
Importance Of Protecting Stock in
Winter.

National Live s'osk JsHruai
1t Is common belief that diges.
ton Is promoted by exposure 10 cold.
w ithln certain limits this is true, but
outside Of these limits the converse
IS true. Thus, an animal exposed to
the extent of suffering from cold. or.
what is worse, cold and wet. will be-
subject TO such interruption OF the
circulation as will disturb digestion.
The blood will be driven from the
surface and limbs TO the vital organs.
and the effect of such undue pressure
upon the minute blood vessels of the
stomach. will be 10 blunt its sensibil.
tiles and retard the natural process
OF digestion. Every one knows that
too much blood in the brain suspends
its functions. Under moderate pres.
sure a moderate degree of stupor
sets in. Under severe pressure per.
iect coma supervenes, during which
there is n suspension of brain mani.
festatious. What is true of the brain
is equally true OF the stomach, and
in place of cold being an invigorator,
under some circumstances il becomes
a cause of great hindrance To the tli
gestive process.
The COW that is tied in a dry, we'll.
bedded stall, is fed there. and allow.
ed TO remain till digestion is pretty
nearly accomplished, will 90 through
the process more expeditiously than
in any condition where less comfort
Is guaranteed. The explanation is
very simple. If the circulation be
undisturbed by cold-allowed to re.
main in its natural channels-it will
flow TO the stomach during the diges-
tive process in exactly the amount
required--in other words, IN a slight.
ly freer quantity than when the organ
Is at rest. AMER the process is com.
pleted, the extra flow will return TO
the general circulation. Now, as
stated, the undue exposure TO which
farm stock is subjected in inclement
weather is damaging alike 70 the
beast and to the purse of its owner.
The abstraction of heat In resisting
undue cold, the interruption of diges.
tion ia tue manner named, and the
appropriation of the accumulated Fat
to enable the system to carry on It's
wsr with the elements, are reasons
sufficient TO deter any man from lcav.
ing stock in the outer air, to their
discomfort. 1t is infinitely cheaper
and better to feed corn aud hay bv
the mouth, at the going prices Of
these, than TO sustain the beast upon
its own accumulated fat.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26

WHAT young breeders and feeders
want To learn how to do, is TO make
the most valuable animals for the
butcher, at the earliest age practica-
BILE. Everybody knows that by hcav-
lily feeding already fat and old cattle,
from year to year, enormous weight
can he obtained. Monsirous bovine
mountains of grease can be made,
hnt they are not what the butchers
want. except on rare occasions, such
IS celebrations and the like, when
many people are willing to eat bad
beef and think il nice. Just because
II came from the carcass OF huge
show steer. Early development is
what we want, These immense steers
of 5000 pounds or more are well
enough to look at, but except for
show they are worth little, being
profitable to neither producer, butch
or nor consumer.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26
Feed or Blood2

yH-'a Tim. 30 1eIHegurui Farmer.
Some say it's all in the blood. and
some say it's all in what goes into
the mouth that makes the animal. /
don't believe 1t is either. Good blood
is a good Thing. An ought TO try to
have IL. But no matter how good
the blood with poor care and bad
feeding YOU will have poor animal.
And vice versa. poor, or impure
blood and good care and keeping will
make a fair animal.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1882-01-26

MANURE is the foundation OF all
land culture, aud although good
gardener will at no time let any fer.
tilizing matter go to waste. The CON-
parafive leisure of winter offers many
favorable opportunities Tor collecting
and saving fertilizers. Where live
stock Is kept, ct course, All manure
should I've carefully saved and mixed
with sufficient absorbents. that none
OF its liquid and gaseous parts may
escape.--AmerfeaH Gardea,