The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1882-03-31
1otss Of the Conductors.

t. - nrobable that 8ilroad conductors
IL, - ,,,P-a ioltes on each other than any
pptber pth class of people, and We would pub
% I;sb more of them, Only the most of the
Conductors ,.,,1 are big men who might tie
ms mn in 4 double bow-knot. We tell
more Jokes ON Rumsay than any of the
rest hecause he is probably the only
one We could handle In a rough and
tnmbIe fight. Fred Cornes and Rum
sew are re9resensativs conductors, in re-
gard to fun. and esen Is laying for the
other 10 play q joetr Not long ago
Rumsev hired pass niger that was 60
inc out on Fred's train, fellow who
had three cat boila, pm his face, to go
into the refrigeratdfip ~ one corner of the
car. and when Fredtcame to pull him
out, to tell him fse lad the smallpox.
The scheme worked splendidly, and Fred
went into the baggage car and washed
himself all over ina tin wash basin, with
bar soap, and stopped thetrain at Brook
field Junction and let the passenger get
off without paying, that beng his desu-
nation. AS the train was moving on the
passenger yelled to Cornes ald told hlm
if he saw Rumsey in Milwaukee to tell
him that the cat boils passed HIM through
all right. Cornes at once saw through
the joke and laid for Rumsey. spell
ago the two met, and both we're tired, so
Fred suggested that they take Turkish
bath and go up to his house and get
dinner, and then lay Gown and have
/ good sleep. Rumsey consented, If Fred
/ would promise to wake him up at five
! o'clock, as he had an engagement to meet
/ a lumberman who wanted to buy some
/ of his pine land. Fred agreed, and they
/ - AAn on KaaUannRa
1 street, near the schoo. house, where
/ Fred comes home once in while, and
went to bed. After they had slept for
couple of hours Fred gt up and dark
! ened the windows, lit the gas in the
room and turned the clok ahead to half
past seven o'clock. Frd's wife was let
into the joke, and sh, darkened the
rooms down stairs, andthe hall, and lit
| all the gas Then Frd went up and
woke Rumsey, who ywned and rolled
over. Rumsey looked at the gas burn
ing. and then at the cbck, and saying,
"This is pretty trick play on gem
tleman," he jumped on of bed and got
into his pants. AS he pulled on his
boots he told Fred that vas the last time
he would catch him in that house.
have been drugged," said he, as he
grabbed a cigar and ais coat and vest
and started down stairL He stopped IN
the hall by the dim gss light to button
his suspenders, and pulling on his vest,
he took his coat on his arm, yelled an
adieu to Mrs. Comes and opened the
door and jumped to he middle of the
sidewalk. Let Rumsg tell the rest OF
the story. Says he Il pledge you
my word it was lightas day. The sun
was shining brighter nan ever saw 1t,
and more than million children were
coming ont of the soiool-house. When
they saw me come oft of the house on {
hop, skip and jump, they thought hac
been fred out. ane they gave me blt
laugh. Hooked around sort of innocent
just as though I always came out o
houses that way and then put on m.
coat and looked at my watch, and it wa
Just four o'clock. My first impulse wa
to go back into the house and murde
Cornes, but he stood at the window witt
his wife, looking so sorry, that l just Ii
my cigar and walked of. But l am lay
ing for him, now, and don't you forge
it. No man can play me for a snoozer
You just wait. Some day you will hea
more about this There don't any o
them get away with Rumsey. Why,
killed a man at Rush Lake Junction
once. for less than that. "-PecRs Sun