The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1882-04-11
Boston Transcript
Mrs. Jacks Easter Bonnet.

'T wouldn't wear it if was dyingl solilo-
quized Mrs. Jack.
And it is fair to presume that Mrs. Jack
spoke the truth. At least, 1t Is not customary
for ladies of mature years to array themselves
in the transcendent glory of spring millinery
preparatory to an encounter with the death an.
gel; and there would seem to be no good azd
sufficient reason for supposing that Mrs. Jack
should depart from the custom of her sex upon
so interesting an occasion.
90 IT is MT the strings that object 10 50
much" continued Mrs. Jack; "though the
Lord knows they are homely enough. ..-y
are neither one thing nor yet another. II they
we're pink or green or red or yellow, thsre'd bs
some sense in them; but they don't bear the
least resemblance to any one of those eolors;
or rather they look like all of them together.
Neutral color, suppose they call itl' abe con-
tinued looking upon her reflected image In
the mirror with supremest scorn. 'Irs al
very we'll for Jack to claim neutrality In poll
tics and religion in his newspaper, bat I'd have
him to know that can't bear anything nsa-
trail in bonnot-strings, and what's more, I
won'tp'
Mrs. Jack had worked herself into quits
state of mind by this time. Stopping mo-
ment TO regain her breath, she continued
81 could stand the strings, 1 suppose; bat
such mean, scrimpy, night-cappy thing nav
will wear-so, there!"
With this she pulled the new bonnet OF her
head with jerk that sent myriad hAirpins
whizzing in all directions and threatened dirs
destruction to bangs, fizzss and waves.
"Now, who ever saw an old-gold rosel" shs
cried, appealing to the mirror, "or black astcrs,
or brown lilies of the valley, or pea-grssa
chrysanthemums? It's just like man! Net
the least idea of taste And they'll pat any.
thing on to him. Probably some old things
they had left over from last year, and thsz
stuck them together on child's hat and told
Jack it was the latest stylel And he believed
them, the ninnyl It's just like himl Well,
he may wear it, il he wants to; I shan'tl'
Jack arrived at this juncture, his face BEAM
ing like bran-new tin pan in MONDAY sun-
shine. Seeing the millinery in the hands Of
his helpmate, he exclaimed gleefully-
$50 you We got it, Mary A little surprise,
you know. It's a sumner, amt it?'
II should say itwas, Mr.. Jack"
1t was the tone of these words rather than
their intrinsic intelligence that caused Jacks
face to elongate suddenly.
,"Why, what's the matter, Mary?" he az
"Matter, Mr.. Jack!n returned Mary, held
ing the bonnet out at arms length, as II 1t hsd
besn recent occupant OF the smallpox hospit-
al. matter, MIR. JackW she repeated; "
should think you'd ask Just look at itl'
"Why," said Jack, beginning TO lose eona.
dence in his ideas on taste, "isn't IL pretty?"
"Prestyi" screeched Mrs j.
With that she let the millinery fall froA
her grasp, and then dropped all In q heap on
the nearest chair and fell to weeping Ike .
force pump
1t was hard on poor Jack. He had promised
himself no end of pleasure as the result OF his
little surprise, MARY will be so happy he
said to himself. st will come so unexpected
too! And now she will admire my taste" In
stead of this, that beautiful bonnet lay neglecs-
ed on the floor, and his wife was on the verge
of Mysteries!
What was he to do under these distressing
circumstances? Do2 What would any hus
band do in the presence of tears?
"Oh, we'll, Mary" he said, coaxingly, "iftt
does MT suit you, of course you can change IL.
l ought to have known that man isn't fitted
to pick out bonnet. There, dear, don't cry
any mere; but put on your things and go right
down to Plushington's and pick one ont yoar-
self. Now don't cry, dear. I've got to go 20
the office; but you'll go to Plushingtons right
away, won't you, dear?
Mrs Jacks tears gradually dried, though
great sob now and then showed the terrible
anguish which still rent her bosom. She
deigned no answer to her lords entreaties, sx-
cepting something or other about that "horrid
thing and was about to break out again into
fresh weeping, when Jack begged her again 70
go to the milliner's right off, kissed her hsstt-
w. and discreetly left her alone with her grief.
When the door was safely shut behind him-
the truth must be told-he did say somethins
that rhymed with lamb, but it is certain that
''lamb' was not the word he used.
1t was wonderful how quickly Mrs. Jack re-
covered from her sorrow Hardly had the
street door closed ere she was herself again.
There was now look OF triumph on her face.
Hastily putting on her street garments she
showed the despised bonnet into the bandbox,
and minute later was on her way to Plush
ington's.
It is needless to follow her thither. II yoa
are woman, you know how woman dispora
herself in a millinery shop; If a man, the less
you know about such places the better for your
peace of mind. l.
The next day was Sunday Easter Sunday,
and as Mrs Jack walked down the broad aisle
in her new bonnet-the bonnet OF her own
choice-she was supremely happy. And Jack
was happy, too, to see his spouse In 30 heaven
ly frame of mind.
"Well, vumi"
Thus Mrs. Jack, as she took her seat; Tor
right in front of her in the Bangupton pow,
there sat Mrs. Bangupton-ths recognized
leader Of the fashionable world-with bonnet
the very counterpart of that "horrid thing"
which Jack had sent home as surprise 70
Mrs. j.
lulS was Wudt llAlos odOA NuAlA4oN soSeN-
l. There were the identical neutral strings; the
nondescript roses, chrysanthemums, lilies and
asters were all there; the "mean, scrimpy,
nightcappy thing" was before her In every
particular. .is-., :.
1t is safe to say that Mrs. Jack got little edi-
fication from the service that morning. Ms
Bangupton's bonnet was mixed up with the
hymns, it was everywhere throughout the
creeds, collects, prayers; the morning
lessons were entirely devoted to mil
linery the sermon, from text TO finish, was
Bapgupton and bonnet; and the benediction
| was made up Of the same ubiquitous elements-
On her way home Mrs. Jack was not 90 cheer
| full as when she started thence. On the con-
| trary, she was taciturn, sad, not to say morose
| Jack saw that something was wrong, bat being
| a discreet husband, and having yesterdays cpl
| sode fresh in his remembrance, he SAID notn-
| ing 1t was no doubt the wiser course.
Upon reaching home, Mrs. Jack hew up the
| stairs but not until she was in the solitude OF
her own chamber did her sorrow ind words.
Clutching convulsively at the strings OF her
new bonnet, she pulled 1t off, and then sank
| into chair and burst into tears.
"I don't care, hereF"
SThis was her only exclamation. She con-
tinued to weep and sob for five minutes, psr-
haps Then suddenly she dried her eyes, took
up her bonnet scanned it all over, and with q
look of satisfaction rather than OF JOY, ex-
"Weii, picked it out myself, at any RATA
None of his buyingl I'd died rather than
have him buy nv bonnets!'