davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
HOW PAT GOT THE MITTEN.

Mr.. Nathaniel Bishop, during his voy-
age to Buenos Ayres, made friends with
the ships cook, who was sentimental
Irishman. Besides this, he was "char-
ac,er" in his way, and kept q dialogue"
AS he called his diary-in which he
occasionally wrote "poethry." One day,
to draw him out, Mr.. Bishop said to
him, at is strange that man so full
Of feeling and poetry as you are should
never have been entangled in the bonds
of love-"
"Ah, now, you've said it - he ex-
claimed, i've passed through that ex-
periencc but woman, the crathur, has
been more bane than a blessin' to the
poor hat. 1t was woman that drove me
from M position in societee to the gal
ley of a sea-cook. Whin | was only
sixteen years of age me father had frind
who was an Irish barrister This gentle
man had daughter who was an angel
yes, that she was / was young and
beardless, she was few years older than
meself. Well, ye see, | became that in
love with her that | offered her me hand
and me hat at which she softly replied,
'Misther W., We are too young"
However, | pressed me suit, for wo-
men want dale Of coaxin;' but she
only smiled. At last when | grew ur-
gent-for an Irishman coorts in airnest-
she referred me for an answer to the sec
ond of Samuel, tinth chapter and the
last part Of the fifth verse.
81 turned at once to it, for | thought
that by it she meant to accept me suit,
and in bashful way tould me as she did,
when what was me horror an shame to
rade the following words: "IdTy at
Jereeho until your beard be grorn, and
tin return"
"Would you behave it, me friend:
This little incident became known to me
acquaintances, an for shame | was fore
ed to lave the country"
81 thought adds Mr.. Bishop, "that,
considering his beardIess condition, the
Irish girls answer was quite Pat to the
OCCASION"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
TINES SOLILOQGY.

Old, call you me: Ay, when the
corner stone Of the universe was laid
was on deck. Before the first circus joke
had shot athwart the morn, | was there.
When the morning stars sang together
might have been seen with my new hour
glass and crude moving machine, taking
it all in.
Amid the bloom and verdure Of para
disc gazed upon the new world radiant
with celestial smiles. Ere the foot Of
man had trod the velvet green Of the new
earth, and before the range had been all
fed down like base ball ground, | was
there.
am the oldest inhabitant. The song
Of the lark and the twitter Of the guinea
hen were first heard by me. When Adam
opened out for himself and pre-empted
the Garden of Eden, | was on hand.
When Noah rounded up his stock and
built his boat, | was there.
saw Babylon, Assyria, Palmyra and
Cheyenne rise, flourish and bust. Nero,
Pontius Plate and Susan B. Anthony
entered upon the great stage OF action
and Nineveh were once proud structures.
saw them in their rise and fall. con-
troll the fate Of empires and ward eau
cuses. Igave them their glory and splen-
dor and then bust them in the snoot
Sooner or later gather them in with my
lawn mower and plant them in the sweet
remotely. spread silken tresses on the
brow of beauty and polish the dome of
the man on the front seat at the " Black
Crook" paint the blush of beauty on
the cheek of the schoolma am and encour-
age the sickly fuss on the upper lip Of
the bilious masher.
mature the giant oak that grows for
centuries, as well as the cucumber that
natures in two weeks. pile up the
salary of the newspaper nabob and accu-
mulate interest on the twenty-four per
cent. note.
bring around the fall election and the
silver wedding with its dollar-store cas-
tors and seventy-five cent butter dishes.
| plant the false teeth in the mouth OF
the venerable, and scatter sciatica and
sadness wherever 90.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
CHANGED HIS MIND.

General Torbet, of cavalry fame, who
was lost at sea last year on the illfated
Vera Cruz, had a decisive and efectual
way of disposing of bogus sick men and
lazy towards. The Columbus (O.) Dis
patch says:
He was a good fighter and hard
worker. While he had kind heart for
the trooper who was always ready for
i" boots and saddles" he hated shirk,
and had his own way Of meeting tn e
complaints urged by such men to get rid
of duty.
Just before breaking camp in the
spring of 1865 the general attended a
sick call to see the state of health in his
command. One after another of the
boys came in for prescriptions, and by.
and.by big trooper, who was noto-
rious shirk, entered the tent with his
hands on his stomach. Torbet took him
all in at a glance, and then thundered
out:
"What are you here for :"
"Sick !" was the faint response.
"What ais you :"
Somethin' hurts me in my stomach.
1t moves round. It's snake, l guess,
that swallowed drinkin' water from a
brook"
"How long has it been tllere:'
"Six months"
I" Surgeon" said the general, as he
turned to the officer, " call in two men
cut this man open, and remove the snake
We are going to break camp in ten days
and we haven't time TO cos.x the reptile
up" hl
Fifteen minutes after that man wa!
out on the line grooming hts horse, and b!
noon he looked well enou gh to eat hi
way through barrel Of pork.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
From Century for August.
TRIUMPH.
II. c. BUNNKR.

The dawn came in through the bars of III
blind
And the winters dawn is gray
And said: However you cheat your mind,
The hours are fying away.
ghost OF - dawn, and pale and weak
Has the sun heart, I said,
To throw morning flush on the cheek
Whence iairer flush has fed?
As gray rose.leaf that is fading white
Was the cheek where set my kiss;
And on that side OF the bed all night
Death had watched. and l ON this.
kissed her lips, they were half apart.
Yet they made no answering sign;
Deaths hand was on her failing heart,
And his eyes said: She Is mine.
set my lips on the bluc-veined lid.
Halfveiled by her death-,lamp hair:
And oh. tor the violet depths thid.
And the light longed for therel
Faint day and the fainter life awoke.
And the night was overpast;
And 1 said: Though never in life you spoke,
oh, speak with a look at last
For the space OF a heart-beart hut,ered he
breath.
As a birds wing spread 10 flee:
She turned her weary arms 10 Death,
And the light of her eyes 20 me.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

"Here, quick ?" he cried, as with a
few rapid blows he cut aside the broken
seat which pinned his rival to the floor
Of the car.
"Quick !" for he felt the car settling,
and heard the groaning of the timber
giving way. "Cal catch him !" and
grasped by strong hands, Ballou was
drawn up through the broken window
to the ground above, and then with a
lurch and crash of breaking timbers, the
heavy car plunged downward on to the
rocks, splintered on their sharp points
and dashed to pieces.
Just as morning came, they found Tom
lying there, crushed out of all shape be-
tween two great timbers.
They brought him up to the depot
and laid him reverently in the great lad
les waiting-room, and as the railroad
men bore him by my window, some one
in the crowd said
"How lucky. that only brakeman
was killed"
Some way it seems to me that great
hearted Tom Marshall has gone home to
a Father who never looks to the grimy
clothes and the weather. beaten faces OF
bis children, but rewards them according
to their deeds. II so, his must be an
exceedingly great reward.-Er.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
A SIGNIFICANT Toast.

An Irishman drinking the health of his
bishop, gave this toast May your river
erence live to eat the old hen that crows
over your grave" II anything could make
that toast true, 1t is Hunts Remedy, whose
one mission it il to prolong life, aud to
deliver from the power of insidious and
mortal disease. And what more terrible
and fatal than kidney and liver diseases
What intense suffering, too, is connected
with urinary troubles. Yet here Hunts
Remedy is King, aud it works marvels in
those who are afflicted with these ailments.
Why shouldn't the suffering live to eat the
aforesaid old hen, when Hunts Remedy
gives such renewed yigor and health!
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
ONLY 4 BRAKEMAN.

"Accident.-An extra freight train on
the B. x G.. K. r. was wrecked, last
night, by broken bridge, just beyond
Carlisle. A son Of the Hon. Carlton
Ballou was on the train, but fortunately
escaped injury. A brakeman, by the
name Of Marshall, was the only person
killed"
1t was only a short dispatch cast into
the corner Of the morning paper amid
score or two of others, but it interested
me. for | knew the whole brave story so
well, and ielt in my heart almost ha-
tired for the writer, who had done such
Injustice to a noble life and overlooked so
grand deed.
was only the night telegraph operat-
or at Carlyle-not very exalted posi-
ton, perhaps, but yet one of considerable
responsibility and trust, From seven in
the evening until the same hour in the
morning | held in the hollow of my hand
the life of every man passing over our
division Of the road. remember, one
night, when | was sitting alone in my
| little cramped.up Office and listened, from
more force of habit. to the varied messa-
ses as they went clicking by to the other
stations on the road. The last train for
several hours-,he freight-aecommoda-
ton from Brighton-had been in for
some time, and had nothing to disturb
me but my thoughts. We'll, Billy,
how's No. ) :" voice suddenly asked,
as the outside door was pushed ajar.
lone hour late" | replied, hastily,
and then, looking up, saw Tom Mar
shall. brakeman on the last freight,
filling up the doorway. Come inside,
and have chair. Tom," added, as |
recognized the face of my questioner.
"Oaly moment, tonight, he an
swered me, as he sat down at my invita-
ton. his lantern resting between his feet
on the floor. 81 have call to make
this evening, and must wash up little
first"
Where away tonight, Tom-not up
on the hill again surely He shook
his head in the affirmative, his eyes fixed
upon nv table where the instrument was
ticking away.
"Of course it's none of my business,
my boy, but it seems to me you 20 to the
great white house too often of late, Bal
| lou might object, and It's said they're
engaged, you know" and | looked up at
his strong Saxon face from where lay
stretched on bench by the wall.
Il think they're mistaken about that,
Billy, but Ballou has more opportunities
than can enjoy" he replied, very slow
ly, - only get in here two nights
week. you know; do the best can.
Then it is serious, Tom :" | asked
for I liked this broad-shouldered, fair
haired fellow, brakeman though h he was
"Tm afraid it is with me, Billy" hi
replied, his eyes gazing steadfastly at tn
lantern between his feet. " But, good
night: l must GO; will see you again a
come in" And the heavy door closee
behind him.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
AFTER THE ANTIQUE.
BY ALBERT II. HARDY.

Rich cabinet OF Louis's reign,
speak Tell me secrets of thy time,
what hast thou seen OF JOY and pain:
la what old chamber. rich. sublime
Eut bark The antique relics speak.
Aud tell their histories complete,
"Uur elegance was made. last week.
l;y Yankees down In Nassau street"
What dingy, quaint old Holland town,
- tile, first saw that ske-bluc cow,
with her,lsmen running up aud down'
Must still be silent? Answer thou.
"Just hold your horses" said the tile,
Before you rave. aud are quito lost on
This antique nonsense. Walt awhile;
Were made few miles out OF Boston"
say, shining bronze, both rare and old,
when didst thou come from far Japan
The bronze replied; That's where YOU'RE
sold.
We're modelled 10y an Englishman."
Thou cloth OF faded lOyeliness,
Upon what Gobelin vert mades
But thus the tapestries confess:
Were manufactured FOR the trade"
Puck.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

SKILL THEW WoRksHoP.- To do good work
the mechanic must have good health Ii
long hours hours Of confinement in close
rooms have enfeebled his hand or dmmed
his sight, let him at once, and before some
organic trouble appears, take plenty of Hop
Bitters. His system will be rejuyenated,
his nerves strengthened, his sight become
clear, and the whole constitution be built
up to higher working condition.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
HAY FEVER OR SUMNER CArARRm.

This distressing complaint, obstinate in
its nature as it is disagreeable in its ELECTS,
happily falls within range of the curative
powers Of PoND's EXTRACT. Sufferers
therefrom are strongly recommended to
combat the malady by using the Extract
itself or the specially prepared Catarrh
Cure. The effect will be the allayment Of
the inhammatory action and attendant ir-
ritation of the mucous surfaces OF the
nose and bronchia. The Nasal Syringe
and Inhaler, supplied by the Company will
be found of great service in application.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
REWARD 10 ENrFRpRIsr.

Four years ago, James Pyle of NewYork
first introduced his celebrated Pearine to
the public, aud now the name OF Pearline
is everywhere household word, and mil
lions upon millions OF packages are annu-
ally consumed by our intelligent house
keepe s.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
IMPROVEMENT FOR Mryp AND Bopy.

IMPROVEMENT FOR MIND AND BODY.
Tte-e is more stre1gth-restoring power
In bottle of Pdrker'S Ginger T'OIic than in
bushel Of malt or 4 ,allon o" milk. As
an rnpetizer, blood purifier and k dney cor.
rector, there is nothing like IL, and inval-
ids consequently find it a wonderful invig-
GRANT for mind and COmDIercidI.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
"Irr un wnn w1xs II Rr,r rnr p,1m-

LET lIM WHO WINS IT BEAR THE PALM
lie who cures the ills of flesh" quoth
the sage, sis even greater than he who
conQuers in war" Certain ii is then, that
Dr. Swayne has earned the laurel of great
ness. His Ointment for skin diseases has
been the means OF releasing thousands
from the indescribIblc horrors OF that COM
plant. The best evidence of an article is
obtained by practical test, and the un-
solicited endorsement Of those who profit
by its use
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
GOOD WORDS PROM DnuGctsrs

Malt Bitters are the best bitters'"
They promote sleep and allay nervous.
ness"
" Best Liver and Kidney medicine we sell"
They knock the 'Chills' every time"
"Consumptive people gain flesh on them"
=" Malt Filters have no rivals In this town"
Best thing for nursing mothers we have"
I'VE like TO recommend MALT BIrLERs."
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

Professor Proctor says that the sun new
er lacks a supply Of fuel, which reminds uS
that the sun is very much like the family
in the neighborhood of our woodpile.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

g. Bless my stars :" said Mrs. Pennypack-
er, "didn't you know what tie vacuum Is?
The vacuum Is where the Pope keeps his
buls"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
CURE YOURSELF

Don't pay large doctors bills. The best
medical book published, 100 pages, elegant
colored plates, will be sent you on receipt
OF two J cent stamps 10 pay postage Adj
dress A. 7. Ordway 4 Co., Boston, Mass.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

"My dear" said 4 husband to his wife,
"what kind of stone do you think they
will give me when am gomez" She ans
wered coolly, " Birthstone, John"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

We should think il any tree would be
worth planting along the western streams,
on the treeless prairies, the cotton wood.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

The railway tunnel under the Hudson.
connecting New York and Jersey City, will
it Is thought, be ready for use in about two
years.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
H00O'S SARsAPAR!LLA

Is designed to meet the wants OF large por-
ton OF our people who are either TOO poor 70
employ physician, or are too FAR removed
TO easily call one, and still larger class
who are not sick enough to require medical
advice. and yet are out OF sorts and need 4
medicine TO build them up, give them an ap-
ne,i,c purify their blood, and oil up the ma
rbinery OF their bodies so II will do duty
,,iiiineIy. No other article takes hold of Inc
,,s,a,, md hits exactly the spot Ike
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

" Mean" she cried, my husband is the
meanest wretch in the world lie wont
give me the least excuse for complaining.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
EOuND AL LAST

An agreeable dressing for the hair. that
Will stop its falling. has been long sought
for. Parkers Hair Balsam, distinguished
Tor its purity, fully supplies this want.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

1t was a clever girl who, when her lover
who was too bashful to speak out, asked
her what he should do, replied 4" DO write,
and fear not"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

An oillce-holder soon tires Of public life
when he suspects that his constituents have
privately resolved not TO re-clect him.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
uoop,s sARsAPARILLA

II works like magic, reaching every part OF
the human body through the blood giving 10
all renewed life and energy.
NV friend. you need not take our woru.
Ask your neighbor, who has Just taken one
hottie. He Will tell You that " IL the Oes'
dollar ever invested"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

WIsTARs BALsAM or WILD CHERRY
cures Coughs, Colds, Bronchitis, Whoop.
ing Cough, Group, Influenza, Consumption
and all diseases of the Throat. Lungs and
Chest. 30 cents and 81 bottle.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22

II was young housekeeper who set the
cake she had baked for surprise-party out
OF doors one cold night TO be frosted
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
r,n.~oy n II Feb. 10, 1879.

LFRANUN, n. M It N' I"i I,'0F
,-Essrs. c. l. HOOP & Co: Dear slrs-,
Although greatly prejudiced against patent
medicine. In general, ! vas induced from
the excellent reports ! had heard OF your
for Dyspepsia and general prostration, and
have received very gratifying results from
iis nse. / am now using the second bottle,
and consider II very valuable remedy io'
ildlgestiuu and its attendant troubles
f. c. CHURCHILL,
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
Crirm of Carter G. Churchill)

- 4 gentleman Who fJnIne0
las been suffering from
The Debility and Ldng1'or IN pnIynnc
peculiar to this season,
says: "Hoop's SARsArARILLA Is putting
new life right into me. l have gained ten
rounds since began TO take it." iIastake
Two bottles.
Hoops sSARsAPARILLAiss is sold by all drug
glsts. Price 81 per bottle; six for - IRE
pared by c. 1. HOOD & CO., Lowell, Mass
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1882-08-22
Gbt0tfora 9tmotrat
,rRIlSDEp EVERY TUESDAY
cEc II. WATKINS.
Fiuor and rroP'ist"r.
.,.rrns---S2.OO per Year.

.,,,.,,s---S2. 90 per Year.
,..,4.,,, in advance. q dsancuOn OF dftS CTS
ll'D't !. ,,..ts. O. paid within ~ months,
t.i,r,,,n 81 tN'pty-Gre GEMS viii pe
.s.. n uof paid III the ent "i the
,..- twO dollars vii be chsrSed'
sIasI. Copies ave cents.
I;ateS of Advertising.
LFGNL NnrtCTS.
,..,os .r,h off sIacc oor wrTs' ti"
foi p' A. b .-,I,..,4ucut Wc's. . ccuts.
....I,. \ot,es-2' Der eeri. Nidt'onsi.
PROBATE NOTICES
49,. o.. No,ice On Real EsiN'e, 2o
..sr. on will. "a
9g.,L.a...r,iSrs, and Executors, Notices, 10
SN,-,,s. ..ioncrs' Notices
- Terms made with Local Aivsrtissrs,Snd
&c 80. cement. continued any considerable
%l...S Sf i,ne: also, for those occupying extern
,,e space. 49,. r,,.,,,,..,r
,,,.le at the following well established
'fee,'Ir, r. c,xcl & Co. 10 spruce s.. New York;
,.-Sv \ e., IN Fulton St' New or =. II; ~;
pa~k Row. New York: I. Z. EVANS
., N4ss.. =. VI. Fe;ienEili To- ~ >tNe ~
,..., Macs. Horace nptt, - w 1~hlh <un y
80, N..s y. ". Aver son, Ph"stclph
u. n A. Cook & CO., Chicago, H. - L. Nuesi
d rr,wcat -. Boston, Mass
sUBsCWBEus
....,r hy examining the coiored slip attached
.-. ,grcrs. the amount due, ant those wish
.v \ themselves Of thc advanced pas ments'
- - ..'J h. bv mail. or hand 10 the nearest a2ent,
.--rt ..' on the slip, means TIE atet . p"ld
O., u .I, r,CD,.S - sent care shoud DC t4ks 10
,.. .t, Sin AMI itthe money l. not credited
80 s,l- weeks NC should D. anprised oi II.
New-York tribune., 1882-02-20

Nevada, Florida, Rhode Island and Delaware
get too large a share of power, the ratio OF
population to Representatives being below the
average in those States; but Colorado, Oregon
New Hampshire and Vermont get too small
share, the ratio being much above fhc
average there Putting these exceptional
cases aside, the largest disproportion III any IN
stance is the allotment of six Representatives
to South Carolina-one to 142. 225 inhabitants.
For this no good reason can be gwen. In tue
case Of Kansas, it can be fairly urged that inc
marvellous rapidity OF growth in that STATE
with its permanent and substantial farming
population. renders it certain that the repre-
sentation allowed will not be disproportionate
more than a wear or two Somewhat the
same excuse could he given for the increase or
of representation in Texas, Wisconsin ana
Iowa. But no other States fall so lar be-
low the required average of population 10
representation, except IN the instances above
mentioned The increase is not needed or de-
sired by New-YOrk Texas also, is very fairly
represented without it; in fact, the RATIO OF
population to Representatives in both states
would be more close to the average, ana
therefore more just with one less member Tor
each than with the number allotted by the
pending BILL But the increase in the case OF
South Carolina is particularly undcserved ana
unjust. If there is any State in the Union
that, on account of its frauds in elections
and systematic disregard of the rights of the
majority, is especially entitled to small
representation, South Carolina is that State
Apparently this piece of injustice to the coun-
ll.I
try and TO the Republican party was log-roied
in order to secure for Kansas II slightly pre-
mature increase The bill would have been
more just had it stopped with 32l members,
because in that case every State having frac-
ton larger than half the general ratio would
have received an additional member, and no
Others In fact, this would have been the
fairest and most equitable apportionment pos
sble under the existing system.
Politically, the proposed apportonment Is
more liberal than just To the Democrats. IL
gives to them, iu South Carolina and Texas,
two additional members OF Congress and votes
for President which they would not have
gained Oh the equitable plan of giving addl-
tional members only to fractions over half the
general ratio. They also expect to gain an
other member in New-York, but at the cx-
pcnse OF losing one vote Tor President ii INC
Republicans retain their majority in this State.
But all political calculations based upon the
idea that parties will remain divided aS they
are now at the South are likely to prove errO-
ncous. The wiser and more equitable course
if the present system was to be maintained,
was to have given an additional member to
every fraction i'll excess of half the ratio, and
to no others.