The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1882-03-15
HUMORS OF THE DAY.
CRoss roads are most apt to be bad.

CRoss roads are most apt to be bad.
ARKANSAS women love to whistle.
And what is more lovely than tulips well
| blown?
TRIPLES light as hair sometimes turn
the whole course Of a mans appetite,
says the New Orleans Picay'tne.
An ILLINOIS girls tonst: "The young
men of America-their arms our sup
porters, our arms their reward; fall in,
men, fall in"
10 SAYS that the best lip salve in crea-
ton is n kiss. The remedy should be
used with great care, MS it may bring on
an affection Of the heart.
A BALTIMORE man remained in
trance for three days recently, and they
finally had to yell "dog fight" under his
window to rouse him to life.
Mrs. HARRIET BEEcHER SrowH thinks
it very inartistic to knit mems foot gear
straight. Doesn't it depend, Harriet,
on whose socks it is that is gored.
A NEBRASKA monument to horse
thief is simply stake at the head OF the
grave and sign reading: "It would have
been cheaper for him to go afoot."
A YOUNG man has generally got the
winning cards in his hand when, on
popping the question, he sees flush
in his sweetheart's face.-'Soniervitte
journal.
BRIDGET (who has discovered the car
pet sweeper): "Luk at the music box,
now. wild the long handle! l wander
how they plays on the insthrumint!-
Boston Transcript
An EXCHANGE says: "If minister can
!, receive the title of DR. why cannot
I physician have the title OF 'Rev?"
y Because people may think it meant
Revelations, and doctors know good
81. deal.
SAID little Edith to her doll: "There.
u don't answer me back. You mustn't be
. saucy, no matter how hateful am. am
); your mother!" Strange what curious
u IDEAS children get into their heads some-
times.
> "WHAr pretty children, and how much
n they look alike says G, during first
= visit Mt friends house. "They are
! twins" his friend explains. what!
=. both of emp" exclaimed G, greatly in
terested.
4 THERE is knock at the front door,
i and the colored person says to the lady
a of the house. "Is you de white CONAN
"a what told colored gemman you was
% lookin' for colored lady to wash your
g clothes by the mumf?"
A. "YEs," said the tramp, "they talk
about the charitable institutions OF Bos
l. ton. Now, man can go down to
o. the Hawkins Street Home and get a
o. supper and lodging, and he's got to saw
lie n foot of wood to pay for it. BY snakes,
is sir, l don't call that charity. ."-Bosto'
lr- Post.
ly A NEW author, who intends to make {
living by good advice, says: "Never leav
ed what you undertake until you can reacl
'e- your arms around itand clinch your hand
le. on the other side" Perseverance, an
,o- all that sort of thing, in the right diret
to ton, is well enough, and even commend
Gil able; but if tho new authors advice
m carried out, one is likely to get his eal
he boxed.-Ncw orleans Picayume.
Is A CHICAGO Young man broke into til
10 room of the girl he loved, to carry he
lp- away, as she refused to marry him
ie- She was absent, but left the bull do
ro- asleep on her bed, The room was dark
es. The dog didn't bark, but worked. L
TO about seven minutes the remains OF til
oD young man came out and said that b
re- wouldn't marry that girl for S7O,0Oo.