The Copiah signal. (Hazlehurst, Miss.) 1882-1883, 1882-04-21
Chr Gppiah Si9aal,
Hazlchurst, April 81 1882
Uncle R,nus Sermon For
Furnl,rs.

Uncle Remus in tho Southern
World breaches a practical sermon
from the text, Children, have you
meai?" After dila,ing upon the
terms Of his text, TO show that chill
dren means mankind generally. and
the farmer in particular, and that
meat means "vit,les," he changes its
phraseoloSy and proceeds with it as
follows:
FARMER HAST TiiOU ANY vIrrLEg
How many in this congregation
could rise up and shaking the dew
drops from their shaggy names, an
swer proudly,
"YEA. FATHER HAVE
Weeping, | pause for reply. Oh!
my brethren, many are called but
few are chosen, and your hang-dog
10, Ks proclaim with trumpen tongues
that most Of you arc in the vocC,ive,
Then NO unto you foolish far
mere. for you are laying ny for your
selves hunger asains, the day OF
hunger.-Wo unto You | say, for
the folly Of the foolish virgins that
trimmed not their lamps was wis
dom compared with your idiotic neg
lcct. Wo unto you and unto Your
wives; wo unto your h1cks and unto
your children. w! wo. wo! Alas!
echo answers wo!
Vanity Of vanities, saith The
preachers, vanity OF vsnities all is
vanity.-The son of David, king Of
Jerusalem, must have invented that
idea OH full stomach, whereby his
reason was cloudcd, for the doctriue
he there propounds is not altogether
correct. A myriad voices spring
spontaneously from the universal
animated creation, and uniting in
one grand choral strain, proclaim in
tones OF thunder that "vittles' is no,
vanity, and | feel sure, my brethren
that you will all take stock with Inc
in that beautiful and pathetic senti-
meut.
Give me vittles or give me DEATH
1t has been beautifully said that
bread is the staff of life. can vouch
for tho truth of this remark with
painful fervor, for verify say unto
you that in my meanderings through
these low grounds Of sin and sorrow
il hath often happened that portion
OF my earthly tabernacle which is
gracefully encircled by the waist
band OF my brooches, hath travelled
for "vittles" aad as the ass brayeth
for his proyender, even so have i
been forced to cry unto the children
OF Mammon in the language Of my
text,
CHILDREN HAVE You ANY MEAT?
II, therefore ye raise not the "vit-
Ties" how can We have the staff, and
If ye have not the staff, how can yo
support the life. ard il We support
not the life, what is to become OF
the country and Of tho preachers? l
will tell you, my asrarian brethren,
what will become Of You. Ycu will
sit ke the prodigal son among the
swine, and doleiully sing.
Iwant but "vittles" here below,
Aud want that "vi;tles" quick;
Or | shall wipe my weeping eyes,
And the bucket soonly kick.
mo we WON'T" some chuckle,
headed brother will say. ave will
arise and 60 unto our merchant and
buy the fat,ed calf on tick But
what if the merchant should say:
20 foolish and impecunious gener-
alton. We seeketh after tick, but no
tick will DO given You save the tick
OF IN" prophet Jonah.
You know my brethren, he tried
10 obey the Lord on tick. and the
consequence was that he got ducked
in the sea and swallowed by whale
and walloped around generally in q
way that made him "git up aud cit"
Just as you will get soused in a sea
OF trouble, swallowed by whale Of
debt, aud walloped until you will
lock meaner than the sneaking "yal-
l.r dorg" that Adam found Sinking
around his kitchen, and has sluLk
around the universal creation ever
since.
o, misguided brethren, are you
content to sit like legion OF Laza-
ruser. at your merchants doors, and
feel that You are free born American
citizens as long as you whine after
others for yonr "vittles?' Then rise
ye slothiul farmers, from the bog
holes OF credit soar aloft on the