Daily Republican., 1882-08-02
:#KRaIIIEIij| 81
sun sets 7.ls

Grab salad at Fullmer's.
DeViled crabs at Fullmers.
SteWed crabs at FuIImer's.
| Ice cold oysters Gt Fullmer's.
| Ambrosia, best fine cut at Mullins.
Get your coffee roasted at 400 King street.
Parker, cupping and leechlug, No. 10S East
Second street.
The best carpenters and m machlnists' levels
ever made, at the 300. store.
Meals the cheapest in the city at Moody's,
10 Market street.
WOman's work An honest man s the no.
olest pursuit OF woman.
That's what boats me,'' remarked a boy
as ne passed pile Of shingles
Fine Ii K. Plain Gold Kings, at e +.
Hanrs. 10 East Fourth street.
All grades Of umbrellas at the furnishing
store OF y. Humphrey & Bro, SO2 Market
street.
Willie says that 1.-THE boy stood on the
burning deck" because 1t was too hot tor
him to sit down.
fine retouched cards for 81 az Hollands
gallery No. East Third street, between
Market and King streets.
Everybody KnUwo Vhat Holland makes the
oeet tin type In the city. No. East Third
streeS, between Market and King.
When mans chestnut curs begin to turn
gray, 1t means that he is fifty years OLD. But
when they begin to turn lack, that means
he Is sixty.
A giraffe has never .been known 10 utter a
sound. IN this respect 1t resem oles young
iady IN street car when gentleman gives
her his seat
Inc most remarkable case on record Is that
OF the Yankee soap.man, who in a violent
| storm at sea saved himself from death by
taking cake of his own soap and washing
himself ashore.
The difference Some one has figured that
the expense Of Conversational session is 8
| minute, VIII le the ward caucus can be run
Tor two hOuss with three taIlow candles a, d
some one to second the motion.
The Cincinnati Enquirer thus head q re
port Of the seating Of nmalls: 'Unparalled
Republican Outrage-A Poor South Carolina
Negro Condemned to sit in the HOuse-And
Associate with Robeson, Kefer and their
Gang
In the countlng-room Of an Irshman the
following notice is stuck up IN a conspicuous
place "PersOrs having no business In this
office will please get through with 1t as soon
as possible, and leave"
"Why ought there to be great many red
ears OF corn this year 2n asked Tom, think
ing that Willie could not guess the answer.
"Ch, replied Willie, "the crop has been so
much talked about that its ears must be
burning ~
"All good people wish for peace and
plenty" said the lecturer. "Yes, whispered
| rogu!sh Ralph to his mother; ''but II q boy
Is to have plenty Of pie he mast get mere
| than one piece ~
speaking of shad, wou' d you say the price
has gone up or risen ?" inquired school boy
Of a dealer in fish. "Well," replied the man
/ of scales, speaking Of shad, should say
1t has rOse." fright" put In the schOoIboy,
"it has rose, sure enough"
School .mistress-Now, Matilda Ann, look
up. and tell me what first caused the tou of
man. No answer. "You are ver- stnnid AZ
ter having just read all &1dut "P IT, What
fruit was II" MatllJa Ann-Please, marin!
please M rm 0rarge peel
A smart boy "No," said the boy. 81 have
no rooted dis ike for Mr.. Stebpin's dog, but it
won't 40 for me to be seen petting it at this
seak0n II did and then anybody robbed
| his melon patch he'd think l get on good
terms with the animal and then scoOped the
! fruit.
Slight mistake: Ono Of the British officers
In the feet at Alexandria bearded the Amer
loan navy the other day. mistaking II for the
steam launch that had been ordered to go
ashore TOR some fresh meat. The officer apOl-
ogiZed in the m st gentlemanly manner when
he discovered bis mistake,
Teacher-What IS score? Pupil -Th6
| tally-card at a baseball match Teacher
NO. no. What mean is how much does 1t
signify In numbers II were to tell you that
had score OF horses, what would you
Think Pupil-Plesse, ma'am, ] should
think you were pOking fun at me.
A boy who had been to musical entertain
ment was much impressed with the way
the leader Of the orchestra had 1ourshed
his baton. After rejecting awhile, the boy
remarked: "That fiddler must be like our
teacher, for, though he was always threaten
ing to rap them over the knuckles with his
black terrule. he never hit them once.
Legitimate enterprise: An Austin man
who was over in San Antonio told us that he
Cve:heardthe following conversation between
two gamblers 'What business are you 20
ing at, Bill 2" "I'm thinking of going out
west OF San Antonio and rob stages. Don't
you want to 20 along?" "But thSt's agin
the law" "AR the better; there won't be
so much complaint as there is in keeping
gambling houses in San Antonio"
A traveller halts at a roadside fence in the
country and asks plOw'boy: MY little
man, do you know the way to Harrow ~
Rustic (somewhat offended )-The way to
harrow? DO you think I've been living on
this 'ere farm all my life, and dunno how to
harrow? Why, can plow, harrow, hoe, reap,
NOV, or do any kind of farm work. "But i
mean the village of Harrow" "Oh, you'll
find that about four miles down this ERE
road.'