Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1882-08-17
NEWSPAPER WIT.

| Next we shall have coat tail Irritation
code. Having the tails covered with mud
will mean Il don't like her father
Boston Post.
| An Alabama editor confesses that he
/" has serious apprehensions" that base ball
is about TO be introduced in that State
Boston Transcript.
The lens takes its name from a bean of
peculiar shape. Is this the reason so MANY
| Boston people wear glasses ?-[New York
Commercial Advertiser.
Enquirer The Order of the Garter ia
conferred only on men. lit wasn't Wales
would just distribute them like fun when
ne gets to be king. Il Boston Post.
A French newspapers says that married
people IN Sweden have more fights than
anywhere else on earth. Going to sewing
society IN Sweden must be real fun. Bos.
| ton Post.
| Some OF our young men before putting on
eelskin pants should have embarked in the
business of raising stock. They should
have raised couple of calves, at least
[Norristown Herrid.
MIR. Conkling was delicately withdrawn
from his retirement by brass band-the
one thing which he hates more cordially
than half-breed. Is this the irony hand
of fate II Philadelphia Press.
Mrs. Nouveau Richie Ito her husband
what sort of voice do you call that.
Tom ?" MIR. n. RI heard 'em say il
was barIowtone, Maria" Mrs. N. r.
with contempt)-" l should think !
and l should say the wheel wanted q
greasin' badly."-Judy.
Continental customs-The father of an
elderly damsel to manageable young man !:
"On the day that give you my daughter
Adele, will deposit 100. 900 francs with
| NJ. LATTE" Francois" Thanks, dear
sir, but suppose you give me the 100, 900
francs and deposit Mile Adele with Nj.
Lafitte. "-[Quiz.
Scrambled snakes' eggs are the new DISH
and as yet there seems to be no particular
! directions for preparing them in the cook
books. We would suggest, however, that
you go out into the country until you find
nest with eggs, and then, when the snake
puts in its appearance, it will come natural
to You to scramble some. Lowell Citizen
Look here Isn't there going to be some.
thing more In the way of hideous pick.
| ling Of Cults cadaver or another nasty row
among the doctors or something Of the
sort? The country has got SO used to being
| Disguised daily with some now develop.
ment OF the Guiteau business that If the
thing is suddenly stopped it will be missed.
L Boston Post.
Did yor battle while you were In Gal.
weston ." asked Gilhooly of Colonel Yer.
ger, who had just returned from visit to
the Island city. "Oh, yes, bathed sew.
eral times" How did you find the
water," No trouble finding the water.
The street cars take you right down to it
| You can't miss the water. It's all around
the island. "-[Texas Sifsings.
Together they sat in the parlor alone.
At the dusk Of Sabbath day,
Her shspely head close to his own,
In tender, loving way.
II Ike TO lay my head, dear vii,
'Gainst yours, she murmlred low
10 tones which made his pulse thrill
And his face with rapture glow.
And Is II because you love me- doyess
| He asked and then she coughed
No, dear viii, not that, but love,
Because its nice and scft THE Judge
" It is not only foolish but positively
| wicked for these men to attempt to coerce
their employers, remarked the good Dea.
con Jones in reference to the strikers,
why are they not content with what is
given them, without attempting to ruin
the business of the country just when the
new crops are SO promising and prosperity
| is everywhere ready to smile upon this
| fortunate land! It's like flying in the face
! Of Providence. The Deacon paused .