davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
saoo in Cash.

On one of the railroads running out of
Detroit the passenger train made sudden
halt between stations the other day, and an
old woman, who was travelling with the
usual compliment of parcels. whirled her
self around and inquired of the passenger
behind
Have we eollided with anything p
Il guess not.
Then what did We stop for?n
There was calf ON the track, be-
lieye.'
That satisfied her for time, but in half
an hour there was another stop to pack a
hot journal
s'What on airth is the matter now p
she inquired as she tried to push up the
window.
"Nothing-nothing-onl COW ON the
track, he replied as he continued his
reading.
The third halt was made just outside of
station for wood, and as she heard the
whistle and felt the train slowing down,
she got brace for her feet and called out !;
"First a calf and then a COW, and now
they are going to bump right into yoke
of oxen and string us all to flinders If
they kin me the old man won't settle for
lessHn 5000 in cash.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
Foreign Cheese in England.

Every one must have noticed the great
increase which has taken place of late years
in the consumption of foreign eheesein Eng
land. Gruyere, Camembert, ROguefort
and Gorgonzola, not to speak of Bondon,
Brie and Parmesan, which few years ago
were hardly known in this country, are now
to be found in thousands of houses and in
almost all hotels We are inclined to think
that this apparent alteration in public taste
is due in part TO deterioration in the
quality of English cheese. American
cheese of good though ordinary quality has
come over in enormous quantities, and can
be sold at low price. The English ma
kers seem to have been discouraged by this
competition, and, instead of endeavoring to
raise the quality of their goods, they have
fallen back on the never.failipg demand for
milk, and have stopped or diminished the
manufacture of cheese, and, what is worse,
have become careless in its manufacture.
Cheese imported from abroad is almost in
variably good, and offers great variety of
delicate favors. The makers of some of
the best kinds are able to produce that
much -prized green mould, formerly so often
and now so seldom seen in English cheese.
Even Stilton seems TO us to be harder and
drier than it used to be- Surely careful
study would teach English makers to keep
up with their Continental rivals, and so
preserve to this country manufacture
which was formerly so important aud so
lucrative. London LdRcet
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
dait and 9uuror.
Preaching to Mules.

Some time ago old Nelson, who for years
had been an unsuccessful politician, Joined
the church, studied for the ministry, and
became the pastor of church. The other
day Nelson was arrested on a charge of
stealing mule, and was arraigned before
justice of the peace.
"Nelson, said the justice, 'this is a very
serious charge that has been brought against
you. | had always regarded you as an
honest man. When my little daughter
was sick she called for Uncle Nelson, and
when you came her face looked brighter.
When she died you dug her grave, and to-
gether we mourned over her. Your prayers
moved my heart and seemed to light can
die in the chamber of my sorrow-stricken
soul How could you, old man, be accused
of theft?s
"Boss, replied Nelson, wiping his eyes
on his sleeve, Use as innocent OBJ dis crime
as Moses hisselfn
you were seen in the stable
'NYes sab.
You were seen to put a bride ON a
mule and lead him out.
'1Yes sab.
''Then you confess your guilt ?"
"No, boss, or jedge-scuze me fur de
slip amt knowledged de crime. IF
yer'll lssen few moments I'll splain de
'spieious circumstances. Like Paul, Use
thankful dat Use permitted ter speak fur
myself. Our eases is jest alike, only Paul
want charged wild stealing mule. 10th
er night, arter workin widout result at
revival, l was gwine home, when gun to
git mighty discouraged Whats de use,
| thought, lob hammerin' any longer on
de anvil OBJ sin :? De sinner won't harken
ter my efforts Den l thought dat I'd
quit preaehin' an go back ter pollyticks.
Jist den thought OBJ de junction: sGo
an preach de gospel ter ebery libin' crea-
ture.' De faek dawned upon me in new
light | had not been preachin' ter cherry
thing. By dis time had got ter de stable
whar a white man keeps his mules. One
OBJ de animals cried wild loud voice ;
| Come an preach De gospel" "Why not, ,
thought, de sparrows doan fall widout
notice, an probably desc mules hab got
souls ter sabe. Den went inter de sta
Bile, tuck my text an gun ter preach. De
moon wus shinin' an | could see de tears
runnin out oh de eyes OBJ big red mule
He fairly snorted in his penitence- Den
remember dat he wus de mule what da
sed had kicked de life outen a teamster
durin de wah Anuder mule put his head
on de trof an wept pityful A young
duck ob mule what had been asleep at de
udder end OBJ de stable cum up an begun
to poke fun at de mourners Ny preaehin
didn't hab no 'fuence on him, an to get
him outen de way / put bride on him an
lead him out, tending fer to hitch him till
arter de sermond wus ober, but when ! got
outside, dis white man grabbed me. Is de
/ splenatiOn satisfactory, jedge2'
Perfectly.
"Tse glad yer's come ter de relief of der
gospel
Il want you TO preach sermon to the
grand jury. Nelson For fear that you
might forget the day, Wen send you to
jail until the congregation assemblies. =
/ drkaHsas Gazette
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
Select Aoetrp.
THE MARRIAGE VOW.


"For better for worse, for richer, for poorer, IN
sickness and in health. to love and to cherish, uli
death us do part according to Gods Hoy OfIitlitce
and thereunto plight thee my troth' --doii""y'
Sertice Of the Episcopal Church
Speak it not Iightly-'tis holy thing.
A bond enduring through long distant years
When joy DER thine abode is lowering,
Or when thine eye is wet with bitterest tears
Recorded by an angels pen on high,
And must be questioned in Eternity.
Speak it not lightly-though the young and gay
Are thronging round thee now, with tones ofmirth'
Let not the holy promise ofto-day
Fade like the clouds that with the morn nave
birth;
But ever bright and sacred may it be
stored in the treasure-cell Of memory.
Life may not prove all snnshine-there will come
Dark hours for all o will ye, when the night
OF sorrow gathers thickly round your home
Love as We did, in time when calm and bright
Seemed the sure path ye tTod, untouched by care
And deemed the future like the present-fairf
Ewes that now beam with health may yet grow dim,
And checks Of rose forget their early glow;
Languor and pain assail each active limb,
And lay, perchance, some wOrshipped beauty iowi
Then viii ye gaze upon the altered brow,
And love as fondly, faithfully as nows
should fortune frown on your defenseless head,
should storms oertake your bark on lfesdark sea-
Fierce tempests rend the sail so gaily spread,
When hope her syren strain sang joyfully-
WIN ye look up, though clouds your sky oereast
Aud say-sTogefher we win bide the blaStg
Age, with its silyery locks, comes stealing on,
And brings the lettering step, the furrowed cheek
The eye from which each lustrous CLEAN hath gone
And the pale lip. with accents low and weak :
win ye then think upon your liies gay prime,
And smiling bid Love triumph over Times
Speak it not lightiy-O, beware, beware!
lis no vain promise no unmeaning word
10! men and angels list the faith ye swear,
And BY the High and Holy One it's heard;
O, then kneel humbly at His altar now,
And pray for grace to keep your marriage vow
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
coNpExsKp HISTORY or srEAs.


About 30 years b. C. Hego, ef Alex
andria. formed toy which exhibited some
of che powers Of steam, and was moved by
it, power.
A. II l454 Athemias, an architect, ar
ranged several ealdruns Of water, each GOV
cred with the wide bottom Of leather tube,
which rse 70 narrow stop, with pipes ex-
tending ta the rafterS; a fire was kindled
beneath the caldrun, and the house was
shaken by the effect Of the steam ascend
ing the tubes This Is the first notice Of
the power of steam Of which we have any
record
In 1913, June IL. Blasco ID, Garuy tried
steAsnboat Of POS tons with tolerable good
sncces, ai Barrelona, Spain. Ii consisted
oF boiling water and a movable wheel on
each side Of the ship Ii was laid aside as
impraciieable. A present, however, was
made Garoy.
In 1850 the railruad was constructed at
Newcastle ON the Tyne.
The first idea Of steam engine in Eng
land, was in the Marquis Of Winchester $
History Of Inventions, 4. d. 1868.
In lTla Newcomer made the first engine
in England
In Ills patents were granted TO Savary
for the first application Of the steam engine,
In 1Tl4 JANIS Watt made the first per-
feet engine in England.
In 1857 Jonathan Hulls set forth the
idea Of steam navigation.
In 1877 Thomas Paine 6nst proposed his
application in America
In I7sl Marquis Jouffrey constructed
one ON the Saone.
In 1885 two Americans published a
work on it.
In 1889 William Tynlongton made a
voyage in one ON the Forth and Clyde
Canal
In 1902 this experiment was repeated.
la l7s2 Romsay propelled boat by
steam at New York.
In 1877 John Fitch, Of Philadelphia,
nayigated boat by a steam engine on the
Delaware.
In 1893 Robert Fulton first began to
apply his attention to steam
In 1898 Oliver Evans, native Of Phil
adelphia, constructed loeomOtive steam
engine to travel on turnpike load
The first steam vessel that crossed the
Atlantic was the Savannah, In the month
Of june. 1919, from Charleston to Liver
pool.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

An old darkey who works around town
by the day, and is very proud Sf his repu-
tation for extraordinary ability in cipher
ing, called on GilhoOly yesterday with view
to get settlement, in cash, for work done
in Gilhooly's garden.
"well, Uncle Ben" said the Major,
chow much do owe you ?"
"Ise worked for ye leheA days at a
dollar day, boss, an, if yer hand me a
piece of paper an pencil I'll cipher it out
fur yer" Uncle Ben got the paper and
pretended to figure nit, He said lehen
days at a dollar day. Lemme see; ought's
a ought, cipher's cipher, figures figure,
two ter carry an one to threw away
'Leben dollars, by gosh Boss yer owes
me prezackly leben dollars.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
Ne,c Oxford, Pa.

Coin OR HoARsENEss.-A correspon-
dent asserts that the following is an infal,
lible cure for cold and hOarseness Boil
two ounces of faxseed in one quart of wa
ter. strain, and then add two ounces of rock
candy, half pint of syrup or honey, and
the iuice of three lemons, mix and boil
them together. Let it then cool, and bot
tie for use. Take one cupful before going
to bed-the hotter you drink it the better,
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
A Bright Little Romance.


When the French sought To establish a
ul0narehy in Mexico a Mazatian youth
raised a regiment Of bays and waged against
such Of the invaders as appeared in Sinaloa
a warfare that told The young man IA
ther was Of Cas,ilian blood and his mother
was Mexican. His name, Corona, soon
became famous, and al the age Of p he was
regarded as the Mosby of Mexico. Atthe
end Of the war he was major general, the
hero of the soldiers and idol Of Maxaiian
society. He was six feet tall, broad-should-
cred. handsome and daring While attend
ing ball at the American Hotel in Mazat-
Ian he stumbled over a domestic, knocking
atray from her hand STOPPING TO pick up
the eroekery, General Corona noticed that
the girl was very pretty and very sauey.
She told him that her name was Betty
Bowman, that her mother was San Fran
cisco washerwOman and that he ought To
know better than 10 rush 50 headlong down
dark stairway. Corona made love 10 the
American miss, and before leaving for the
capital he had learned Of her irreproacha-
bic though very humble life. Once awas,
Bettys face and pert ways haunted him 50
much that he wrote to her arranging for
marriage by proxy He remained in Ma
zatlan The bride went to convent school.
They were thousand miles apart, and
wrote to each other daily, the husband con-
stantly instrueting the wife in polite ways.
President Juarez, fearing that Corona S
popularity would lead the people TO give
their vote to the young soldier at an cleo
tion then approaching, concluded to send
him as minister to Madrid. the most enyia-
bic diplomatic mission in the eyes of all
Mexicans. General Corona took the wash
erwonans daughter to his palace in Mad
rid, and she now is regarded as the most
brilliant and accomplished lady at the court
of Spain.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

Mrs. Sybil Tickner Of Cornwall, Conn,
was 100 years old on Feb. 4.
Emily Ayers. for forty years a servant
in the family Of w T. Wyatt, of Balti-
more, died recently, aged l04.
The Rev Edward Palmer of Barnwell,
5. C.. still breaches every Sunday, although
he is in his 93d year
Mrs. Polly Cleveland, of Morrisville, n.
Y, Is in her Tooth year, and in good health,
and Mrs. Deshon, of Portland, Me-, was
1913 ON Dec. II.
When Caroline Taylor was sold as a
slave TO Col. David Sloan, in Charleston, 5.
c. in 1895. she was %. She died recent
ly in Centreville township
A lady who died recently in Newbury-
port. Mass, in her 91st year. was attended
by physician for the FIRST time in her life
in her fatal illness.
At the date Of the Declaration of Inde-
pSndenee Audreas Biseoniar, Of Saranac, y.
Y, was one year and half old He is in
tolerable health.
Uncle Dasy Colson, living on Col. Jor-
don's plantation, Hawkinsyille, Ga, is III
years old When he 6rst rode mule to
mill the Revolution was not over.
One Of the American seamen seized by
the English and confined in Dartmoor
prison in 1912 was David Wingate, who
died recently in Rochester, y. H., at 90.
When Mrs. Mary Winn died recently
in Philadelphia, at l01, she left surviving
her 6 children, 35 grandchildren, % great
grandchildren, and - great-great grand
children
The oldest person in the State Of Indi-
ana Is Father Imhoff, Of Richmond, who'is
now in his l0Tth year He has good
appetite, bat his mental faculties are failing.
The Dominion Of Canada gives pension
Of s25 to Ions Watzeau, an Indian chief,
born in Canada l06 years ago. He was
commissioned by Queen Victoria as Chief
Of the Banogwais.
In the war Of 1912 James Isom spent
his time in u mountain cave making salt
petre for the manufacture of ganpOwder for
the American army. He died on Jan. 4,
at Richmond, Ky, aged l02,
Samuel Beckley died recently at Flint,
Mich. in his 109th year; Mrs Caroline
Carey at Buffalo, aged l04; Mrs. Ann Den
ny, at Smyrna, Del, in her l05th year, and
Mr.. Catherine Branch, in Boston, aged
Ill.
The oldest married couple in Rhode IS
land are Cromwell and Deborah GOrton, of
East Greenwich. Qu the 10th day of April
Mr.. Gorton win BE- 92, and his wife has
completed her 90th year. They were mar
ried sixty-seven years ago.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

from-by inhaling instead of expelling the
breath to fill the balloon-swallowing the
whistle and india rubber sack attached to it.
about the ugliest thing imaginable to deal
with, since the toy sticks in the windpipe,
and every attempt to breathe tends to in
fate the balloon. and 50 the sufferer is
ehokcd as promptly and inexorably as If
he were in the grasp of a garotte. The
moral of all which is that people should be
careful about putting solid substances in
their mouths.-Netc York World
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

called dcceas,S at one time proclaimed the
hours, and at the bench ofjustice announced
every three hours the time of day.
In the Turkish empire time is reckoned
by certain portions of the natural day, re-
sembling the watches of the ancient Jews
and Romans. Public clocks not being in
use, these divisions of time are proclaimed
from the minarets.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
DAspRuFy-Dandruf may be treate

DANDRUFF-Dandruf may be treated,
when mild, by oils or soaps, Domestic
soap may be used with advantage once or
twice a week, in place of toilet soap, and
the softness of the hair restored, after such
frequent washings, by the application Of
some simple pomade or cosmoline. A stiff
brush, or worse fine comb, should never
be used to remove the scales.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

swell, now, Joe, said Governor Vance,
''do you really believe in this election by
God that you speak Off"
Deed | do, Massa Vance, said the ne
gro seriously, with shake of the head
well, do yOa think | am elected to be
saved?'
',Scasly know, Massa Vance, but neber
heerd of any one being 'lected what wasn't
a candidate.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

1t was in the smoking room of an At
lantic steamer that worthy Teuton was
talking about weather forecasts. "Look
here, said he, II dell you yot it is. You
peter don't dake no shtock in dem wedder
predictions. Dose people don't know nod
ding. Dey can't dell no peter as can,
But, my dear sir, said person present,
''they foretold the storm which We have
Just encountered" ~Vell, dot ish so,
said the Teuton, eontemplatively; 'bat !
dell you vat it is, dot shtorm would have
come yust the same if it had not been bre-
dicted.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
Curious Facts.
Compjisd to, the Democratic .Idrocats.
l. \ e.

The arabic land of the United States is
estimated at .250, 900 900 acres.
\ cotton factory in Russia employs 30
900 hands
A railroad was sold in Texas the other
day for $500,
Ten million pounds of candy annually
manufactured in the United States.
81 Unitarian churches in the United
States. ia in Massachusetts.
Saxony, with population of 100000,
had 210 suicides last year-l5S men and
50 women.
Opium in Southern Asia enables 40O,-
900, 900 people to get drunk.
An English clergyman charges double
fees for marriages in Lent.
A pocker rife, with barrel only eigh-
teen inches long, has been invented
An old woman in one of the French de
partments has just died and disinherited her
sephew because he sung the Marseillaise
in 1899
The bed of the Missouri river, at Sioux
CITY. is $40 feet above that of the Missis-
sippi at Dubuque, in the same latitude
The telegraph companies of Great Britain
ard Ireland own 100000 miles of wire and
manage 3.i69 stations
They have stylish parties in Boston at
which no one worth less than $3.50. 900 is
admitted.
The Fall River cotton mills manufacture
114.364. 900 yards-or 64,977 miles of
cloth, yearly The pay-rolls of the various
establishments amount to S200,000 a
month.
A man Is taller in the morning than at
night to the extent Of half an inch, owing
TO the relaxation Of the cartilages.
The human brain is the twenty eighth
part of the body. but in the horse but a
fonr-hundredth.
Ten DAYS per aunum Is the average sick
ness Of human life.
About the age Of &c the lean man gen
orally becomes fstter and the fat man leaner.
Richter enumerates Goo distinct species
Of disease in she eye.
The pulse Of children is ls0in minute /;
al puberty il Is 30; and at 60 il Is only 90.
Dr. I.etsom ascribes health and wealth
F th " 1eAstA W. ~AtA @h
diseases and crimes to the use of spirits.
Elephants live for two hundred, three
hundred and even four hundred years. 4
healthy full grown elephant consumes thirty
pounds Of grain per day.
Bats in India are called flying foxes, and
measure six feet from tip to tip.
Sheep in wild pastures, practice self
. defense by an array in which the rams
stand foremost in concert, with ewes and
lambs in the center Of hollow square.
Three Hudsons Bay dogs draw sledge
loaded with 800 pounds IS miles day.
One pair Of pigs viii Increase in six years
10 li9, 100, taking the increase at fourteen
pigs each per annum. 4 pair of sheep in
the same time would be but o.
A single female house iy produces in
one season 20 ,0SO. .329 egrs.
The aca, grasshoppcr and locust jump
200 times their own length. Equal TO a
quarter of mile for man.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

A good story is told of General Buffers
sarcastic retort upon Massachusetts judge,
whom he was teasing for a ruling favorable
to cause he was defending in court. The
Judge got out of patience at last, and
somewhat testify exclaimed,
@Mr. Butler what do you think I sit here
for?n
The General quietly shrugged his shoul-
der, and replied;
The Court has got Me now,
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

Jane, where is that sunfower / leff on
my table this morning, before going to the
ofhce?' "If you plaze, sir, missas took it
down stairs to cook; she said there were
some essthits coming to dinner, an it was
all she had in the house
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

Some time ago FIVE leading vocalists, en-,
gagged by an operate impresario for tour
through South America, met for the first
time on board the ocean steamer in which
their berths had been taken, and in the
course of conversation made the discovery
that they were all tenors and members of
the same company. Unable to conjecture
what object the impresario could possibly
have had in view in providing himself with
FIVE tenors, they demanded an explanation.
"Do not trouble yourselves, gentlemep,
about my arrangements, replied the man
ager Il know what | am about perfectly
well. Depend upon it, shall want you
all fve. You will see, soon after You get
across, that three, if not four, of you will
die of fever and | shall be dependent upon
the survivor, whoever he may be, for all
my first tenor parts. Gentlemen, wish
you very good morning
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
CHANGES OF A CENTURY.


The nineteenth century has witnessed
many and great discoveries.
In 1909 Fulton took out the first patent
for the invention of the steamboat.
The first steamboats, which made regu-
lar trips across the Atlantic Ocean were
the Sirius and Great Western in 1880.
The first public application to practice
of the use of gas for illumination was made
in 1902.
In 1913 the streets of London were for
the first time lighted with gas
In 1885, there was built at Waltham,
Mass, a mill, believed to have been the
first in the world, which combined all the
requirements for making finished cloth
from raw cotton
In 1890 there were only twenty-five post
offices in the whole country, and up to
1887 rates of postage were twenty-five
cents for a letter sent over four hundred
miles.
In 1907 wooden clocks commenced to
be made by machinery This ushered in
the era of cheap clocks.
About the year 1888 the first railroad of
any considerable length in the United States
was constructed
In 1910 the first experiment in photo
graphy was made by Daguerre.
About lS40 the first express business
was established
The anthracite coal business may be said
to have began in 1920.
In 1886 the first patent for the inven-
ton of matches was granted.
In 1916 the first telegram was sent.
Steel pens were introduced for use in
1903.
The first successful reaper was coustrue-
ted in 1898.
In 1916 Elias Howe obtained patent
for his FIRST sewing machine.
The irst successful method of vulcaniz-
ing India rubber was patented in 1899.
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04
rnr ENnIIsn rnRoNE.

The following table gives the names Of
all the soyereigns of England, from Viii
liam the ConquerOr down to the present
Majesty, Victoria, together with the date
of their coronation
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

Life runs not smoothly at all seasons,
even with the happiest,
The Democratic advocate., 1882-03-04

"For better. for worse, for richer, for poorer IN
sickness and in health to love and to cherish, ull
death rs do part according to Gods HOY OfIttioce
and thereunto plight thee my troth. -hUF"'ye
.gcraice N The Episc0Ddt Church.