Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1882-12-14

GATHERINGS FROM GOTHAM.
An Old Fashioned Snowstorm for Thanksgiving
CoHimuning with Josh yanderbiit's
Second yeHtare.
Special Correspondence.


York is at its brightest in such clear
crisp days and beautiful nights as VIZ
had in the ides Of November. And then
for Thanksgiving we had an old-fashion-
ed snow storm, which has been followed
BY al the term implies here in the me-
tropolis. Beautiful snow makes a
mistake when it comes to New York.
In the country it aTranges itself in long
white stretches, with occasionally slight
elevation, until IL reminds one of d
great. faultless dinner table before the
era of decorated china came in; but in
New York there is no such dead same
ness. The snowflake tumbles down as
airy and neat as a newly-fledged broker
entering the Stock Exchange; but its
c%onceit, like his, is taken down with
great rapidity. No sooner does it reach
the ground Than one foot after another
tramples 1t out Of shape, it finds itself in
a tumble of cigar stumps, gutter mud
and general sweepings; a horses hoof
passes it to a cartwheel, a tramp's shoe
carries it into a rum-shop, il is kicked
from sidewalk to street and from street
back to sidewalk, until finally IL is of
about the color and consistency of the
mud it tries to hide. A few hours after
snow has fallen a native of the tropics
if suddenly brought to New York, could
see nothing unusual inthe streets except
much dirt that is almost sloppy enough
to be called mud.
Among the figures often seen about
the corridors of the Fifth-Avenue Hotel
is that of Henry w. Shaw known to
fame as Josh Billings Every man,
woman and child has heard of him, but
every Il does not know what manner
of man he is, that his quaint philosophy
hidden beneath such wretched ortho-
graphy is the quintessence of worldly
wisdom gathered from the experiences
of a life that has known all the ups and
downs and the joys and sorrows OF hui
man existence. There are few more
serious men than Josh Billings. For
several months this summer he was in
visible, but lately he reappeared in his
old haunts. When | saw him q few
days ago he looked to me more like
Edward Everett Hale, the Unitarian
minister, than ever. He didn'tremain
than a minute or two in one place,
but would stalk around with his peculiar
tony, giant stride, swinging his long
arms. In conversation the philosopher
talks lluently, and not at all as you
would naturally expect him to. He
makes you laugh frequently, but he
does not even smile himself. He is all
the time as solemn as an owl. His earn
estness is simply phenomenal. Its sur
prising to see how many people he
knows. Almost every second man who
came in the hotel he spoke to. | nreply
to my inquiry he said: 81 have lately
ih11A IotA g " up y
isn'ta hair turned on the horses. We
started last May-my wife and Ito
drive through New England and Canada
Mrs. j. b. did the driving, lfyou want
to see the country, 60 that way, aud
| you'll see it, ..We went for amuse-
ment and recreation. Whenever we
arrived in IA town we were Immediately
surrounded by a crowd. We'll boys
would say, if you must have it, get a
hall and I'll read you my lecture They
were not longin getting aroom ready
The same old lecture. The Probable
ties Of Life The lecture is twenty
years old. Its name has been changed
several times, but people don't know
it. Did you ever see anything that had
such wonderful vitality? 1t is made up
of small paragraphs, without the slight
can begin with the tail rs we'll as the
head, and read backwards" ''Do you
eve vary your style?" Il can't write
any other way. With me everything
must be put in two or three lines. AS
soon asl attempt to expand the idea il
becomes SO weakened thatit is good for
nothing ''Do you sit down and study
your %aphonsms out?'' "No. They
come to me spontaneously. | may be
walking down Broadway, orin an omni-
bus, on a train, n talking here to YOU,
when they come like u flash. 1t may
be somc days, however, before / deter
mine the exact form they shall have
Mr.. j.. b. took out a notebook in which
he had jotted down some fresh conden-
sed wisdom an hour before. The ink
was not dry. The last line read: kind
ness is an instinct; poiiteness only an
art "What is your definition Of hui
mort inquired. .IIumor must be
based on TRUTH he replied, tapping me
with his forelinger and drawing it back.
cit is because q thing is ludicrous and
at the same time true to nature that
people laugh at it. Now, Artemus
Ward was not a humorist, but he was
the drollest man the country has ever
produced. Writers who make their
effects by hyperbole are not hnmorists.
Genuine humor lasts forever, because ii
is true. You 0 tire Of hearing Il
man tell ~stupendous lies. Doestieks ran
on because he got into this vein en-
tirely." Then the tall, stoop-shouldered
angular philosopher squeezed my hand
in his big brown one, dropped it alb
ruptly, and he took strides like the man
who had on seven-league boots,
One OF the bits of gossip going is that
the widow Of Commodore Vanderbilt
has "aptivated General B%eauregard.
This may be true, as Mrs. v. IS plump.
sprightly, and still a few years short of
30. If remember correctly, she came
to New York from Mobile or New Or
leans, leaving a husband behind, from
whom she was separated, but not di-
vorced. Her mother accompanied her,
and took as much interest in her daugh-
terls fortune as any fond mother could
and gave her many points in diplomacy,
| am told. The daughter first got into
the good graces of William II. Van