New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1882-02-15
English spoken."- How Tibbitb Tried
to Worry . Couple Of Paris
Sale6Ilon,

1lbbittS tried to worry one OF these
Partisan statesmen and for once succeed
ed. He stopped the party promenad-
ing with him on tho Boulevard des It.
aliens at jewelers.. who displayed in
his window the legend. English Spok-
en-" The English spoken in the
shops is good enough, as rule, to ex-
plain the nature and quality of the
goods, and that is all. Further, the
English speaking salesman has no more
idea of English than he has of Ashantee.
Tibbitts marched in boldly, and the
English speaking man appeared. He
was = very well preserved, bald-headed
man of fifty, and at him Tibbitts went.
':Do you speak English?''
'Out-yees, Monsieur"
Tibbitts grasped his hand enthusiast
tically. -
':Ifs refreshing to meet one in q
strange land who can speak ones own
language"
'Yees, Monsieur"
SWELL, what I want to know is. is
the Chicago and Northwestern railroad
cutting rates tho same as the other
roads. and do they cut for WESTERN
bound passengers the same as for east
ern, and do you have the remotest idea
that the cutting will be kept up till
September, when return, and does
the Pullman sleeping car company cut
the same as the railroad companies?''
"Eh, monsieur? Geese watches -
"You don't quite understand me.
You see the Pullman sleeping car COM
pany is quite distinct from the railroad
companies, and one may cut rates with
out the other. See? Now, what want
to know is
The bewildered Frenchman, who
spoke English, stared in a wild sort of
a way, but his politeness did not desert
him:
ICES eet re watce, re diamond, ze-''
':Not yet. What want to know is,
who is this Lapham and Miller who
have been elected to fill the vacancies
occasioned by the designations of Plat
and Conkling, and is Miller going to
be tail to Lapham's kite, or are they
both square, bang up men, and
''Will monsieur look at ze goodsp"
mo, no. Is the Chicago and North
western in this row?''
By this time the Frenchman was out
of patience. 81
monsieur talks-what will you call
'im-gibberich. I have not ze time to
waste. Eef it ees ze watch"
''Sir,'' replies Tibbitts. severely,
''when you announce English spoken
you should speak English, or at least
understand it. Good morning, or, as
you don't understand the plainest Eng
lish. bong sac0iy."
He had succeeded this time. and
should have rested on his laurels. But
Tibbittses, alas! always overdo what
they undertake. He had extracted so
much amusement from his first expert
ment that he tried it over again the
next day. He entered . similar place
and commenced the same thing.
''What l want to know Is, IS the
Chicago and Northwestern in tho rail-
road war, and do you suppose the cut
ting of rates will continue till Septem.
Der, when return, and
.:Indeed cannot tell you, sir. It is
something I do not keep the run OF.
You had better apply to tho American
exchange or the Herald Office
This IN the best and clearest Amori-
can English. Poor Tibbitls had fallen
upon . bright American who was turn-
ing his knowledge of French to account
BY serving as salesman in Paris. Mr..
+ Tibbitts smiled CHASTITY. smile as he
bowed himself out OF the place. Bad
marksmen Who by chance big : bulls
eye should be. very modest and refuse to
shoot again. Even Napoleon. great g