Helena weekly herald., 1882-07-06
BUSINESS WAS BAD.
Legitimate Enterprise ParalyZed by
Civilization.
Brooklyn Eagle


Brooklyn Eagle
And how are things in the far west now?'
asked Brooklyn man of stranger he had
picked up, and who had been living out in
the territories.
Bad" replied the frOntiersman. Times
are not what they used to be. Why, sir,
they try man by jury now. Yes, sir !!
Catch horse-thief and lock him up in a jail
and give him just as fair trial as they do a
man who murders a woman. Oh the whole
country is broke up"
You SURPRISE" replied the Brooklyn man,
who was more surprised by the manner than
the matter of the intelligence.
/ Fact Where I live they've Iynched
only one man in four years, and that was for
wearing stand-up collar! And they don't
shoot any more! No, sir If two men have
row, they fight with their fists, and the
sheriff sees fair play 1 tell you this beastly
civilization has ruined the frontier. They
arrest even road agents now! Think of
that Road agents! They used to elect
them school trustees and stage driver is
no more account than mayor is in Brook
lyn. l tell you the frontier is dead ~
But how is business"
Nothing doing at all. You see they've
got blue ribbon lodges, and that knocked
business galley west. Absolutely nothing
doing Merchants are starving every since
the temperance movement commenced. |
don't know what the country is coming tO!'
Don't the temperance people do anything
for living?"
Nothing to speak of. Oh, they have little
shops and kind of trade among themselves
to keep each other going, but legitimate bus
mess is busted, 1 tell you! What do you
think they had there just before l left?''
I'm sure l don't know"
"a church festival! You won't believe it :;
A church festival! Right in the heart Of
of the town! The merchants got together
and swore they would not go, and they
stayed away. But that didn't break it up!
As sure as sit here those people went right
along and had their festival! That shows
how things are going Then a friend of
mine licked deacon one day. Fined him
cash for it, and he had to pay"
"Any gambling there now."
Gambling! Gambling! Well, should
say not! There isn't over eighty or a
hundred gambling houses in town, where it
used to be the staple enterprise Gambling
1 tell you everything is dead. Why, they've
even got ten-cent pieces for change! Think
of ten-cent pieces"
"How do you account for all this?"
"The newspapers did it! They~would
blow about the country and tell what a town
they had, and now they've got it. We were
doing well enough, but outsiders found out
that it was a good place and in they came
with their puritanical notions and knocked
industry highern stack of chips! l was
opposed to the papers, and said they'd make
trouble, but they let em go on; and where
are we now?"
"Do you think of going back ?'
whats the use? There's no trade at ALL
Every ybody's honest, and all making money
farming. I've got farm myself-a hundred
Legitimate enterprise is busted" !
Want to sell your farm ?' said the Brook
lyn man, cautiously
"Sell it! I'd give it away. It's worth
$4,000, and I'd take $4,000 for it."
The Brooklyn man reflected a moment,
and then the trade was cOnsummated. Later
ON the deed was transferred, and the Brook
lyn man went home to tell his WIFE,
The frontiersman sent the following dis
patch:
"BUCK DUDLEY, Hole in the Wall, Mon
tana: Jump the Norwegian claim tonight.
Have sold it to sucker, and potted the
cleanup Buy Calamity Frazers saloon for
me on thirty days
KICKER BAILEY.
Sometimes Montana business is better in
Brooklyn than in Montana, and an able
bodied liar who doesn't lie too hard can do
country as much good as whole territorial
press that overdOes the matter.