The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1882-10-11
The Romance of a Hammer.

YesfI am, believe, quite a disin-
terested person, and fairly well-known
Tor both my courage and modesty
was boarding in retired neighborhood
IN New York. an1 next door to me
lived, in private house, an old lady,
with her granddaughter. Need 1 say
that that young person was unusually
attractiveY l regret to state, however,
That any advances on my part in that
direction were met at first with much
indifference. OF course, an acquaint-
ance with tho old lady had to be made,
and very queer Old lady was she.
With a great many eccentricities, she
had one in particular which over
shadowed the rest. Once her house had
been robbed, forty years before, and she
had never forgotten it. Though she
was deaf as post, she assured me that
the least noise disturbed her of nights,
as the dread of robbers was always on
her mind. Whether the young lady
shared her grandmother's fears or not,
did not know. l rather hoped size
did.
If, as thought to myself, I could
only take advantage of this old woman's
fancies, that might give me an intro
duction to the house. The old lady
was garrulOus, and l very soon scraped
up an acquaintance with her. /
had not been talking with her more
than five minutes, shouting my words
into her ears, before 1 broached the
subject of robberies From my pocket
! drew a newspaper and read there
from in loud tones long account of a
housebreaking adventure. l must
confess that in order to add some point
to the story introduced some quite
new facts into the description. For
instance the street in which the rob
berry took place was in an entirely diff
ferent part of the town from ours, and
for it substituted our own immediate
neighborhood. In the original version,
however, it was an old woman who
had actually been at the mercy of the
bandits. l howled it all out, and had
the satisfaction of seeing that it had an
instantaneous effect on the old lady.
"Deary mel'' said the old Lady. "Ter-
riblel and we are so entirely unpro-
tected-two lone women!'
"Awfulp' 1 replied; and when rob
bers get in a neighborhood they never
let up until they clean out everything.
/ don't like to tell you, but l have seen
some very strange and mysterious
looking fellows-tramps apparently
lounging around here lately"
"Bless usl and am SO deaf, and so
nervous. / am sure | shan't be able
to sleep for weeks. What can l do?"
81 have an idea," said l. In what
story of your house do you sleep?"
"Second story" Then the old lady
described the position of her bed
chamber-second story back. Her
granddaughter slept in the same room.
had known that before from a care
full reconnaissance 1 had made My
own modest chamber in the boarding
house was on the same floor, and our
rooms were contiguous, only separated
by the thin party wall
"Now, my dear madame" said /, "
am going to propose plan of action
for you, quite simple of its kind, which
ought TO relieve you of all anXieties.
might recommend a burglar-proof aIs
paratus with telegraph attachments
but those are very expensive things tC
set up. 1 can manage it all with 4
hammer"
"a hammer p exclaimed the ole
lady, opening wide her mouth anC
eyes.
Eyes; simple hammer"
"But / should be so terrified that i
10 in /
could use it. l couldn't knock hin
down with it," The old lady was ter
ribly hustered.
Il didn't mean a hammer to be useC
as weapon. Oh, dear, no; quite diff
ferent from that. Your room in you
house and mine in my house are ad
iacent, end the head of your bed is jus
near anime. Now, l viii buy you
anal hapmer, aud an YOU have 70 q