The Northern Pacific farmer., 1882-09-28
YOUNG MEN.

ceived that Mr.. Porter Bligh was a very
astuto individual.
YOUNG MEN.
Mr.. Thistlchod's Disgust at their Alb
surd Dress.
Burlington Hawkcyc.
Old Mr.. Thistlepod climbed up the
broad stairway of marble and rosewood
leading to the hig1,-backed, Queen-Anne
editorial rooms Of the Hawkeye, (the
best advertising medium west of the
Mississippi, and the most popular paper
in the world, now is the time to make up
clubs,( yesterday morning. His heavy
tread fell noiselessly upon the Pompa-
dour velvet carpets, and, as he sank into
a costly oscritoire, the perfunled light
fell through the stained glass tantmieux
at the facade of the managing editors
ebranlement-dc-c9ur, and touched the
old mans face with Il softene4 ormolu,
that seemed like OH echo from the state
ly renaissance that looked down upon
tho walls. Carefully moving the elegant
Louis Quinze passepartout where the old
man could not tip it over with his feet, if
after his usual habit he should choose to
rest them on the carved mauvais- -suiet,
the editor asked the honest tiler of the
soil how wore crops in the Flint River
country.
"Crops?" echoed the old man. "Wcll,
now l want to tell you about crops.
Corn's all right, an oats was bettern u.s.
ual, an wheat just doomed; but you've
got a crop Of fools in Burlington that'll
Just lay over any green thing that over
draWed the COWS in the state of Iowa.
and said he hadn't heard such intemper-
ate talk since the prohibition canvass.
Ike added that there were some fools iii
Burlington, he had heard, but as they
were not subscribers to the Hawkeye, he
didn't know much about them, and felt
very little interest in them.
"Why, the town is full of 'em,'
shouted Mr.. Thistlepod, who labors un
der the Impression that he can't be
heard unless he talks very loud.
GLOW can you tell they're fools?"
askedthe society editor.
'By their clotEics," waved the old man,
and the society editor slid as far as he
could under the table, and then laid his
face flat on his arm in order to write
more easily "By their clothes," re-
peated the sturdy old agriculturist
10y gaul if a boy Of mine 'uz to dress
like the young tcllers see in this town,
I'd beat some sense into him with
a neck-yoke. Why, it's redik'lus, I tell
We it's redikIus. /! see a you1g chap
down in the countin' room with pair O
trousers on him tig!iter'n candle moulds
Il hope to die fl didn't think he'd
stuck his laigs into a couple O snake-
skins: N his coat-by jockeies, it
wasn't hardly long enough to cover his
tit him closter than his undershirt, and
his shirt collar sawed his ears every
time he turned his head, ~ he wore his
watch-chain outside his coat. An he
wore a flat hat, with round top, about
as big a.; il cooky. .!n' his shoes! Pint
ed, do We know, pinted like toothpicks,
m they were as long as pickaxes. 10
see him s>ippin' around in that git-up,
tonkln' more like Il monkey nor white
man, y gau1, it made me mad, m swan
| wanted TO lick him. | declare I did
They's no sense in Il Christian man MAX
i'll such an outl;ltliSh spectacle of him
self, an if over ketch my boy dressed
up in any such a doc~goned, redick'lus,
absurd, disg,,stin' fashion. III be gaul-
swizzled if I-lcllo, Jasper, are We wait
in fur me-"
And saying good bye, Mr. Thistlepod
accompanied his son down stairs to the
wagon. AS the old man turned to 80 he
did not in the least resemble the ''young
felier' down in the countjng-reo The
big felt hat he wore had ori ginally been
of some color, but that was years ago.
The blue merino band, sewed on with
black thread. was too loose, and a twine
string tied tight around it caused the
hat to bulge out above the band like the
dome Of i mosque. The hickory. shirt
fastened at the collar in severe simpli-
city with a big horn button, scorncd q
collar of any kind. The roomy brown
vest had four white bone buttons and
black shawl pin, and through the irreg-
nlar reticulations Of its much-apraided
back the solitary suspender showed,
rcsolutely clinging to a button aft and
nail forwar |. The baggy blue trousers
swellcd out below the tlapping vest into
an ample dome, strangely creased and
fearfully wrinkled, breaking, as the old
man walked, into awful billowy bulges
and humps. while one long,
deep, diagonal crease showed where the
trusfy suspender, hauled taut from port
to starboard, held everything fast on the
quarter. Farther down they bagged in
great, curying pillows at the knees, and
wrinkled behind; they were brief, and
came to an untimely end about four
inches before they reached the top of
the shoes, and they ended abruptly;
same size all the way down, and sawed
square off across the ends. The shoes
were not exactly pointed at the toes, and
when the old mans feet we're not in
them you couldn't bet which way the
toes were pointed. Jasper was attired
in like manner as his father, only being
much taller man, his trousers were cor.
respondingly shorter. AS they passed
through the aesthetic decorations of the
counting-room, the man in the lean pants
laughed sneeringly, and Mr.. Thistiepod
laughed tauntingly. The managing edi-
tor sank back in bis ermine cushioned
tleur-de-terre.
Il am afraid" he sighed, wearily,
'those two people are laughing at each
The Wealthiest Man in Mexico.
Villadama, Mexico, letter to st. Louis Re-
publican.
From Nuovo Laredo on the Rio
Grande to the Solado River the ride is
devoid of interest, and during it the best