Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1882-02-19
Il CORNER IN COFFINS.

their supplies from long distance. The
man died because, among other reasons,
he could not postpone it.
The brother of the dead man ordered
handsome coffin for the occasion. He
ordered it from an undertaken by the
name of Hotchkiss. The mother. in,la
of the deceased, not knowing of this,
ordered coffin, too-a cheap one. She
ordered it Of Sudberry, another under
taker.
Hotchkiss came, measured the corpse,
and withdrew. Shortly afterward Sud-
berry appeared. He took the measure
of the remains, too, the attendants sup
posing that he was in some way connect
ed with the other undertaken.
In the afternoon Hotchkiss came with
his coffin. It fitted like glove. Just
as he was giving the finishing touches,
and making the corpse feel comfortable,
Sudberry arrived with his coffin. They
looked at each other +; Hotchkiss smiled;
Sudbe1ry didn't. The latter saw that
the former had got ahead of him but
that was not all. Hotchkiss' coffin was
not only a very handsome one, but he
had arranged things so that the corpse
looked like it was proud of being dead.
It's appearance cheered grief-stricken
friends and relatives. They we're elated.
Sudberry's coffin was cheap and coarse
and it was empty.
They had words. Sudberry blurted
out
"You've taken a mean, sneakin' ad-
vantage of me"
"CoHin was ordered of me in regular
way," retorted Hotchkiss.
"Td like to furnish coffin to bury
you in,' continued Sudberry.
"Pd rather live forever than be buried
in one Of your old cheap collins.
"I'll cut down the price Of collins IN
til you'll have to pack your blankets out
of town.
"Cut away"
He did cut down prices so low that
he got all of Hotchkiss' business. Then
Hotchkiss cut below Sudberry's prices.
1t was getting cheaper to die than to
live. Several availed themselves of
the reduced rates. Old Gudsey, who,
as matter of economy, ate only one
meal day, took this occasion to get off
and avoid the expense of even one meal
day.
Sudberry cut again. Hotch1iss met
it. Then the former began to pay 81
for the privilege of undertaking a
corpse. His business livened up. Ted
dy O'Flynn, who had partner in
bout black stand that he could net get
along with, availed himself Of this OPP
portunity to dissolve the partnership,
and make a dollar. His partner died
very unnaturally. The increase of the
death-rate OF the town was very notice
able. A good many people seized the
occasion to get rid of their enemies and
turn an honest dollar.
Hotehkiss, too, began to offer a re-
ward OF ST a corpse, and drink of
whisky thrown in. The next morning
Rattlesnake Bill, desperate character
Of the town, stopped before Hotchkiss'
shop, with four dead Cinnamon in a
wagon. He wanted 81 and the drinks.
The undertaken objected to taking the
Cinnamon Bill told him he could take
them or be dumped dead in with them,
and go over to Sudberry's. Hotchkiss
took the four Cinnamon. Bill took the
four drinks. Hotchkiss had cut prices
about as far as he could. He had .
large family dependent upon him. Sud-
berry had no family-no family at the
tine. He had previously buried the
several members Of his family, as it
came right in his line, and he did it at
first cost. The former approached the
latter to see if they could not agree to
restore old prices. Sudberry would not
entertain any such proposition. Said
he would sell. Hotchkiss bought.
Then, to retrieve his losses, he put
up collins to exorbitant prices. He
knew if any one else set up in the under
taking business, weeks would elapse
before his cofins arrived. There was
great falling off in the mortality that
had prevailed. None but the wealthy
could afford to die, that is, to die de-
Gently.
There was great deal Of dissatisfac-
ton. People expostulated with Hotch-
kiss. They said it was perfectly legiti-
mate to make a corner in any other
article of trade, but to make it in collins
was sacrilegious, and ought not to be en-
dured, He answered that he had as
much right to put up the price Of his
wares as baker OF q butcher had TO put