The National tribune., 1882-08-26

course l. hau noU studied that closely. linen
he untolded the plan he had in view. I was
to be his model. ! was to stand as that
figure stood, upon a raised platform while
he sat before his easel and transferred to
canvas every line and curve of my form
and the color of my flesh.
81 was too deeply insulted for tears or
rcproaches. i felt humilated and disgraced
and turned without word to leave the
room. Before got to the door he said !:
You shall not be injured in any way;
will never approach nearer you than from
here to that platform, and / will give you
five dollars day for twenty days / heard
every word Of it, but made no answer I
opened the door and walked in dazed way
down the stairs l seemed On the point Of
fainting. The cool air of the street revived
me, and went back to my boarding house
more angry than ! had ever been in my life
before
found two letters on my table, one from
| mother and the other from George NV
dear mother had been for many years q
martyr to rheumatism. One of her hands
was drawn almost clear around by the
! paroXysms of pain through which she had
| passed. We had no hired girl and now she
was unable to take care of herself and [,
who had always been her nurse and cook,
was hundreds of miles away. I opened the
other letter, expecting to find the money in
it to take me to my mothers bedside 1t
was not there. He had been to my mothers
house and found her i'll, and he too, urged
! upon me to come home, but his letter con-
| tanned no hint as 30 where the money was
to come from to pay my way.
Il was indignant at the man who prOfessed
to love me, and yet who had so little regard
for my feelings as to acquaint me with nv
mothers need for me, and yet offer me
no assistance
"It was therefore useless to write to
him. Ny brother had spent the little l had
given him in repairing his house, and no
relief could come from that quarter
was almost insane with desire to be with
my mother. / tossed from side to side Of
my bed that night, prey to the most har-
rowing thoughts. In fancy I saw my mother
stretched upon her bed, within sight of the
cook for her daily subsistence, slowly
starving 10 death. Then the words of the
artist came back to NY recollection: You
shall not be injured in any way I will
never approach nearer you than from here
TO that platform, and l viii give you five
dollars per day for twenty days
"Ihad no sooner repeated the hateful words
over to myself than l spurned myself for
even remembering them. No, 1 could not
humiliate myself in thas way Then came
the thought of my mother and of her suf-
ferings and of my utter helplessness,- of my
lovers selfishness. IL proportion as my love
for her increased and my anxiety rose to
fever heat my aversion for him intensified
until itgrew to hatred. Towards morning,
worn out with conflicting emotions, l fell
into troubled sleep, but arose refreshed
Youth and health asserted themselves, and
went to my breakfast feeling that the die
was cast. After breakfast 1 went back to
the studio, carrying with me my mothers |
letter, Somehow felt that it would be |
protection to me in the trying ordeal to !
which her daughter was to be subjected |
| found the artist alone, and without speak |
ing handed him the letter. He read it care
fully while 1 watched his countenance He |
was visibly impressed by its contents, and |
as he handed it back to NE said: AS God, |
before whom we must both stand, is my |
witness, you shall be treated by me as if |
you were a marble model instead of flesh |
and blood / asked him if it would ever |
be known that l acted as such. He said:
No; you will be here two hours each day !
when | am supposed to be out at lunch. l |
always put that notice ON the door. Ladies
are ascending and descending these stairs at |
all hours OF the day. You will not be
noticed; you can wear a veil and avoid
coming straight to my studio by going up
another flight sometimes, then returning
when no one is in sight.
Il was shown a dressing-roor, where /
was to disrobe and put on a loose shawl
which would admit of exposing only the
part upon which the painter was engaged
for the time. L agreed to the terms, and he
handed me the payment for the first sitting
in advance, with the promise to make all
payments dailj. / need not describe to you
the painful details of that terrible ordeal,
but went through it as best could. He
seemed not to notice my embarrassment, and
studiously avoided looking at my face.
The first sitting was given to my arm
and its proportionate length. AS time went
on | became more reconciled, but always
entered the studio with shudder | myself
saw to locking the outside door and never
permitted him to answer a knock or an APP
peal of any kind from the outside. He car
ried out to the letter his part of the agree
ment, and but for the unfortunate circum-
stance of his leaving the studio Immediately
after the sitting yesterday no person would
have known that was his model. l heard
your step in the studio but mistooh it for
his, and when looked up and saw you felt
as if my sin had found me out.
Then / determined to tell you all my
story and appeal to your manhood to respect
my secret"
All this was said with bowed head and
averted face. At times her emotions over
came her and she was obliged to stop until
she could master them. That every word