The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1882-12-01
Mark Twain's Barometer.

somebody was asking Hartford man
low it happened that Mark Twain wrote
nd published so little nowadays. "He
rtes as much as ever was the reply,
bot his barometer is out of order, and he
ies not know what to publish. So he
;sblishes nothing"
What in the world has his barometer to
hvith his literary activityY
| His barometer is man.servant named
lOb, who is remarkable for his deficient
ylse Of humor Mark never can judge of
be merit of his own performances. Years
40 he fell into the habit of testing every
| hing that he wrote by observing its effect
' .pon Jacob. II jacob listened to the read
' ag OF the article, Jest or story with un-
aOyed C0untenance, or merely smiled in a
etiunCtOry way Mark was satisfied and sent
Tie manuscript to the printer. But II Jacob
llihed outright, or gave any othe" indica-
-on Of Ceuine merriment, the humorist
11cluded that the stuff was hopeless and
sihheId from publication. lie regarded
licob as intaliole and came to leah upon
be Judgment.
About three years ago, 1t appears, Jacob
'"NN A"l 'AAN lAiSN NAAllN mum oNlhN OAA
Mer that his master was u proie SsiOnal
alnoTIsl lie felt greatly honored that he
a?lid have been chosen habitually to
GY The first freshness OF every new pro-
Ndon Of genius. He did not exactly
;alaStand why he should have been thus
noen, but felt in a vduge way that great
lsnorlst must need sympathy and appre-
aluon, and must naturally look for 1t to
2elelowbeing nearest at hand. He also
mllhM he had perhaps failed TO be at all
VINES sufficiently appreciative. So Jacob
spy his discovery to himself as far as his
lS'er was concerned, and resolved to be
apprecla,ive III the future Us anybody
| Nld desire.
One day Mark called Jacob in and read
;rl sketch entitled The Cow and the
Lsh.nlngrod Man. In composing IL Mark
~ nAtlered himself that he had struck u
NIty line streak. To his amazement
.tNo put back his head and roared. With
unsurpassed ejaculation Mark dashed
manuscript into the waste.paper
Then Mark waited six weeks or two
.Ollhs TO collect his forces for he is never
mpllate in anything he does, and
saeyed a romance called How Bounced
-e Baby He summoned Jacob and
Sehed his face with obvious anxiety as
read the touching narrative. Jacobs
-A,a was painful to observe. Mark tore
ZINE story and then tore his nair.
,aL TWO or three experiments of this sort,
~ uhvarying results, persuaded Mark
van that the malaria, which he has been
fading ever since IL began to creep up
connecticut valley, had reached him at
~, ~ and destroyed his powers OF useful
NJ lie fell into u settled melancholy.
~ itend, the Rev. Mr.. Twichell, tired IN
y sa 70 cheer him up, Perhaps, suggested
sNhell, your man has really cultivated a
se OF humor, so that you must no longer
,~T by opposites. Mark shook his head
+,soorowed volume of Jonathan Ed
pw sermons from his friends library.
S NegsOpled out long passage from, the dis;
s.% on eternal punishment, and palmed
Soaon Jacob as his own latest effort. For
\. utst time in history, the gloomy peri
Ma provoked peals of laughter. jacob
NY NY nus sides and shook all over. Then he
rS,enly stopped, his couutcnance becams
-S1A turned pale, and he incon,inently
NV s' lie had seen murder in his master:
lhat, said the Hartford man, in con
pSLoh' is why Mark Twain does not write
lung his reputation ms ahumorist upon
barometer, and his barometer no Longer
Was Philadelphia Press.