The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1882-06-13

The opinion of the learned Italian
Jesuit Ginlio COrdova so compli
mentary to providence that insects
didn't exist In Paradise, but
were created subsequently, to the fall
for the special annoyance of mankind,
might have been received with favor.
Bed-making was performed at any
hour from three, to ten in the after.
noon by a relative of the landlady' s
who also officiated as cook, and gen.
eral attendant. One room, extend
ing from front to rear, over the dry
goods store served as parlor, kitchen,
and dining room.
A BIG WHITE SCREEN
concealed the culinary department
from general observation, behind
which, Judging from auricular and
olfactorv testimony, was mixed up
arrangement Of pots and pans, babies.
crockery, cradles, cooking stoves and
blankets. We believe the landIady,
her husband. children, and servant
slept there. In the public hsIl the
the boarders used to divert themselves
by killing cockroaches Of evenings.
The diet provided was plentiful
though porky-. swine flesh forming
its staple. Progies, purchased in their
decadence from perambulatOry fish
vendors, sometimes varied this anti
Hebraical popularity. The coffee
tasted like diluted molasses favored
with roast peas, chickory, flanders
brick, and dirt. The hashes were
tallowy. The buckwheat cakes par
took equally of the characteristics of
FLANNEL AND GUTTER PERCHA,
and sometimes had insects known as
bed-Jugs in them. But pork was
the universal dish. Every body was
over-porked. Boarders had rashes
broken out upon them in consequence,
and we remember one consulting
doctor under the impression that he
had contracted varioloid.
There might have been a dozen
boarders The aristocrats of the place
were a dispensary doctor, who gener-
ally fuddled himself Monday morn
ing and continued in that condition
until Saturday night; dry goods clerk
from the store below, and a young
man engaged in the wholesale fish ex.
porting business down town. The lat
ter used to perfume the room with a
banquet de salt mackerel. Another
boarder aspired to the position of pet,
and was hated by the rest because he
brought home
BUTTER OF AN ATHLETIC DESCRIPTION
as an equivalent for his entertainments:
also, it was said, cheating the landlady
by altering the weight-mark on the
top of the firkin.
In Justice, however be it remarked,
hat he could eat of il at the table.
He even professed to like it. The
Peck of dirt" assigned by an un-
pleasant proverb to every member of
The human family as part Of his inev-
table ailment, might have been dis
posed of in very short time at this
house. The landlady did not waste
time in washing plates, dishes and
other gastronomic utensils, and the
sediment of a weeks antiquity often
collected in the bottoms of the
pitchers.
THE KNIVES AND FORKS WERE
PICTURESQUE
and various in size and pattern, the
backs of the former having been worn
INTO keen edge, and most of the lat
5er owning broken or distorted prongs
md revolving handles. Some had
,een repaired with putty which
came off in use; this applied
also to the plates.
Cruets stood away and were desti-
ute of shoppers, which might account
or the presence of hairs and crumbs
n the catsup. 1t was advisable to
,crape the surface of the salt before
bit out for use. The table
10th resembled flag Of the United
States in consequence of the many
,arti-colored stains Ornamenting 1t.
We believe it was reversed once a
ortnig Int.
The like stoical indifference,
almost to sublimity, to
what ordinary mortals affect to con-
slider the decencies of daily life, ex-
nibited itself in other particulars. In
oed-making, only one sheet was chang
ID at a time, and many of the blan-
sets had large gaps in what ought to
have their centres, admirably adapt
ing them to summer use. We incline
10 the belief that the towels, original
" constructed from coffee-bags, were