Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1882-02-23
THE COMICAL SIDE OF THE PROHI-
BIrION oUESTION.

blIkOA
that prohibition does or does not prohi-
bit are scarcely exeelled by the efforts
in Kansas to make prohibition a success
ora failure.
Gov. ST.. JOIGS's assertions are sought
on the one hand to sustain the allega-
ton that it is q success, and assailed on
the other hand to show that it is u fail
ure.
In the mean time the boys are having
q heap of fun in Kansas. Some instances
of the way the Claw is being enforced"
in that State have a comical sideto them
that are very natural incidents Of pro-
hibitory liquor law in any locality, but
they are frightened up with n Western
humor that make them very laughable.
The "boys" of Kansas, of course, do
not want to disobey the liquor law. At
the command of the statutes they have
loyalty given up beer and now drink
nothing but sea foam. Butthey do like
it. In a recent trial at Topeka growing
out of an unaecountable spirit of inquisi-
ton, which insists upon knowing the
trivial secrets oflife in that once bloody
State, the following facts were develop
ed:
Question. Did this sea foamloo like
beer?
Answer. Ii did.
80. Did it foam like beer? A. 1t did.
AhN MI "a k.Nz III. LN.l l.I
so. Could youdiscover any difference
between it and beer" A. i could not.
so. What, then, in your judgment
was it? A. 1t vas sea foam.
80. What is sea foam? A. / don't
know"
Another very humorous thing in con
nectiou with the crusade is the letter of
the attorney of Usage county, in reply
to a hauling oyer the Goals given him by
Gov. st. John for allowing the law to be
30 generally violated in his county. The
attorney reminds the Governor that the
population consists largely of foreign
coal miners, whose education was COM
plete before they came to Kansas, and
who have obtained nc new light since
the enactment of the prohibitory law.
He sadly adds that they are as tenacious
in taking their daily dram IS the Gov
ernor is in enforcing the law, and, while
the latter was elieiting the encomiums
ofthe press during his eastern pilgrim
age, they had persisted in drinking his
health in mugs of 'alf- and-'slf, and q
new fluid eondiment Of recent introduc-
ton called st. Johns tea. "This class
of people" he says, represents the bulk
of our voting population; 1t is the class
that elects delegates to State conven-
tons which nominate Governors, and
upon whose favor and support hinges
all local political success"
The attorney tells how the juries are
drawn from this class, and, though he
has used his best efforts with them to
secure conviction Of guilty parties, re-
serving for his closing arguments the
choicest selections from the Governors
eastern addresses, "they shed it as .
duck sheds water, and the general re-
suit is a hung jury or a verdict of not
guilty" He informs the Governor that
he will remember a rousing speech
made by his excellency at the Usage
Opera House, "when s9.ST was taken up
to inaugurate an aggressive campaign"
This shows that the prohibitionists of
Kansas are as generously responsive as
those of st. Adams. Stirred to life and
action by it, the Usage City Council
unanimously voted to commence
prosecutions. The attorney sorrow-
fully recount his efforts to secure the
Of trsnsgressors. Even a
Quaker jury failed to convict "That