Daily Republican., 1882-02-28


II East Fourth street, Boyd Booker.
He who puts bad construction on a good
act reveals his own wickedness OF heart.
The yarn spun BY the sailor sometimes be-
comas the thread ofa story BY tho novelist.
Modesty is worth what shadows are In
painting she gives to 1t strength and relief.
Get your pnosographs ct Hollands gallery
No. 4 Third street. two doors East Of Market.
gallery, No. Third street, betwssnMarkst
and King.
Brains cannot be measured by the size Of
the head, nor eloquence by the extent Of the
mouth.
In all things there are two ways. When
one does not know which to take, it may be
best to attempt neither.
The queen Of the Sand wich Islands Is .
heathen, but she doesn't wear q cart-wheel
hat to an en- ertainment.
The philosopher should be man willing to
hear every eve suggestion, but determined to
Hyeu want q first class parlor suit made
to order for low price, 20 to W. W. Wood.
wards, Sixth and Tatnsll streets.
Church choirs are put at tho back and t
churches TO accommodate the timid worship
pers who can not face the music.
For bargains in furniture aud bedding 90
to l.. F. Adair's, 2O7 Market street and 80
his goods and learn his prices.
The largest and best assortment Of picture
frames can be found 1t q. K. Bsugh'A 6es
Shipley street.
Our incomes are like our shoes: ifrtoo
small they gall and pinch us; but If tOsIarge
tney cause US to stumble and fall.
A Texas Judge knocks six months of OF a.
ninetynlne years sentence in order tn show
the prisoners friends that he was willing to
give him chance.
Ta,e apple is now considered cd excellent food
for brain workers. Well, We believe this
uit originally came from the tree of knOwl..
edge.
Never be at your place OF Business when q
person want; to borrow money Of you be:
! cause II your are In, you will be out but II
you are out, you wi II be in.
Every man thinks there are three things
without which the world would come to =
stand-still. First, the sun, second, the moon,
and third him self.
Oscar Wilde says we have sou ething Hell
lenie in our national life. Wait uGul he
tastes cur American whis, ey and he will CAL
1t by worse name than that.
A altimore paper says: ''Pigs will be
pigs this year." Very glad 10 hear it. Fer
some time past good many Of them have
Uoou etToeL cdd phsseuBerS.
Shocks thinks man is fortunate who has
his will contested after death only. He says
his will has been contested ever since he we'd
ded Mrs. Shocks
In bad way: "Are you dead, T)m ?" said
an irish father to ais son, who had fallen
down y well. MOT dead, f. ther, bat spaehe-
leFs," came up from the deUths.
Persons wanting mince meat, apple butter
preserves OF all kinds, good, pure tub butter
buckwheat &C., can be accommodated atH
H. Moore'S stalls. ~ and u 2nd street market
IN aesthetic accident: Look at -"
said Joughness to Smi h, pointing to q man,
striding up and own piazza, at a watering
place " Ia corrugated brow ";he d-f
thinks he is thinking.
Knocked down by q conundrum ut Is
poor taste to laugh at your own jOkes.r said
Henderson something l rever do, though l
do say it," Does anybody else ever laugh
at th.m ?" asked Fagg.
TAILORING
SUITS made to order in fashionable STYLES,
from sl5 up psnts fr' In So 50 up ft guar
anteed. learing, scouting outliIg and re-.
pairing speciality. WM NCKBs zIE, 2 East
Seventh street.
The story Of lazy school boy who spelled
Andrew Jackson h dru JaxOn, has been
equalled by New York student who wished
to mark half dozen shirts. He marked the
trst John Jones'" and the rest "do."
We have been MANY times an unwilling
listener to the "sait he'' and "said !" nara
lions In public conveyances and elsewhere,
put never knew an n.tance where the said
ls' ditn't.say all the lsmart things, and the
said he's" all the stupid and vicious ones or
where the ''said g. didn't come of victori-
JUS in the end.
An old gentleman who always took notes of
MS minister's sermons, on one occasion read
hem TO the clergym n. "Stop ! stop !" said
ence Il didn't say that" II know you
,idn't' was the reply Il put that In myself
70 make sense"
when Hattie was i've year, old, her sister
married farmer who owned large sugar
Soon af or a generous package of
maple sugar Was sent me, and the little
girl exclaimed "Oh, mamma I'm 10 glad
we've married into such nice family ~
Profitable joke cracking A wicked man
minded farmers by sending them through
he mail for one dollar recipe" to prevent
Jumps from freezing on cold nights. rhe an
wer to the farm .rs' letters Was: take them
n doors ovtr night"
There is a story told of member of Ger
ain theo 'ogcal seminary who vas so sensi-
i've as to any suspicion to plag' ar SIN that he
loScI hlluWcu W miho LILO SllSuteeS
|uo alton without x wing his authority. On
ne occasion he commenced grace at break
ast thus: Lord, we thank Thee that we
ave been awakened from the 'leep which
Vrter in the Edrbu 8 Review has called
the image of death '"
Sci ntitic exp r,ment: "A man out in New
erscy tempted to waco nate n bu. dug the
thsr day, ju for an expert nent," said
nan in cafe the her evening. ut took,
presume" replied his companion. 'rook
Veil should lay 1t d d; the bulldog crouch
d lik n bali, and lett ny himself sudde ly
Ut took rouple OF fingers G fl the man. who
ook 70 his els 1t YVES one of the suprem
s cases of took on record
IN REssIoN DU CoLLAs.BUTT N.
SOmebo you always seem too small
10 lightly At the buttonhole.
Opearly disk, you ra my soul
When down into my sho you tall,
lose you twenty times week.
And find you when think you lost.
When hunting you on NOR VI .rOst,
What eulogies Of peace speak.
Yohwander coldly down my back;
And DER the carr ct nimbly 8 roli,
Va 4 I. H.