davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
Presentations to Royalty.

Inside the palace, the same crush, the
same Impotence, the shaking out of
trains, the fervent adjurations to friends
to be .'set right" the feverish anxiety
to kiss the august hand so quietly
stretched out to receive the loyal salute
Few women walk gracefully through.
the ordeal, and most of them flush un-
becomingly in the vain attempt to man.
age their trains successfully during
three cOurteSies, to stop at the proper
moment, and 20 exactly know when to
~relinquish the podgy fingers presented
to them. And yet what care has been
taken. what time has been wasted to in
sure a complete mastery of the perform
ance! Rehearsals have taken place,
masters of department have been sum-
moned. domestic representations of the
throne-room arranged. debutantes have
courtesied scores of times to members
Of their own family till they have been
pronounced perfect, and then have
failed de~plorably on the eventful day.
1t does not seem so very appalling to
pass for five seconds before q short, fAt,
somewhat aged woman dressed in black,
with always the faintest soupcon Of
weeds about her; and yet stout hearts
have quailed, brave officers have got
entangled in their swords, ven the pro-
fessiOnal beauties have lowered their
bold. proud eyes before the pale. ex-
pressiOnless look of the royal lsdy.
Familiarity with these scenes does
not remove the weird sensation; and yet
every available pretext is taken to re-
peat the ceremony. The Queens mem
DRY must be remarkably short, or her
desire to note the changes events create
in her subjects very strong; for a girl is
presented to her when she ''comes out"
again when she is married. and if, like
Lady Waldegrave, she has had four hus-
bands. at each successive nuptials she is
obliged to appear before the Queen
as a perfect stranger. A man also
comes with the charm of novelty. and is
introduced da cGpo at every step he
takes in his profession, and at every new
distinction he receives. This naturally
= large attendance, no matter il
at times slightly mixed, as it is not un-
frequent to be tightly wedged in the
ante-rOoms with people n would on
no account have on ones visiting list;
but it likewise causes q crowd so dense
and so INSCRIPTIONS that. when fair
ladies have found the use of hands and
elbows insufficient to procure standing
room, they have been known dexterOus-
ly to dispose about their persons pins
with the points outward, and to trust to
those weapons to remove the more de-
fenseless of their neighbOrs. As the
style of dress is strictly decoilete. and
by the express command of the
Queen, there is 3 certain amount Of
in this mode of attack. -LoSd0a
Cor. N. Y. Sun.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14

And lightly springing to q bpsG,
He rOwed to reach the caSkee
But 10! twas only tabSy-cat,
In cast-o6 butchers basket
Now tabby-cats catch mice and rats
Thus daily dOeth Moses:
But Kitty Cat, who can't do that,
Her love in rhyme discloscs,
With many sincere pur-r-rs, KITTY
CAT"
"Next Pussy Cat, with grateful pur-r-rs.
A birthday gle ting adds to hers;
And wishes every day to try
To show her love. So now goodbye.
Purrin9ly, Pussy CAT"
When papa first began to read he
smiled, but soon the tears came into his
eyes. and he put his arms around both
little daughters, and told them how sure
he was that they loved him as he loved
them.
Say, boys and girls, would you wish
to be loved by every one? Then don't
be so careful to look out for number
one, but think Of the other numbers
first. Lillian Payson, in s. S. Times.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

Mr.. and Mrs. George NJ. Pullman
rode through Italy in one of their owp
palace cars, the first that was ever taken
south Of the Swiss lakes.
Mrs. Julia Ward Howe lately re-
ceived the gift from her brother, Mr..
| Sam Ward, of a very handsome house
| on Beacon street, in Boston.
The London Observer thus closes q
feeling tribute to Longfellow: ct is
scarcely too much to say that since the
death of Byron no living English poet
enjoyed % wide . popularity as Long
fellow"
The London Truth announces that
Don Philippe de Bourbon, the second
son of the Count d'Aquils, is about to
marry Miss Mackay, daughter of MI.
John w. Mackay. the California bonan-
"a king.
More ex-Senators of remote service
are constantly appearing in the news
papers. John P. King, who is now
living near Augusta, GA, is said to have
begun his duty As Senator earlier than
any other man now in existence. His
service began in 1888, and ended in
1881. = Chicago Herald.
Dickens christmas Carol is now
in the hands of q Birmingham book
seller, who offers the manuscript for
sale. The remainder of Dickens manu-
scripts are at the South Kensington
Museum, excepting that of Our Mutual
Friend" which was brought to the
United States by Mr.. Childs.
Charles O'Conor, of New York, has
moved into his new house at Nantucket,
overlooking Vineyard Sound. He is en-
joying excellent health, and spends
much of his time with his collection of
books and pamphlets, which are ranged
on the shelves of q large fire-proof
library. twenty-five by sixty feet in size.
He is said to be preparing an autObiOgg-
raphy, in which special attention will be
paid to some of the famous lawsuits in
which he has been engaged.-M. Y.
Post.
Miss Cary's first lyric triumphs were
achieved before her delighted neigh
bors. ON the verandah of her fathers
house, in the village of Wayne, in
Maine. She wa the youngest of DR..
Cary's six children. all of whom were
gifted musicsliy. The Doctor used to
say of his young daughter: IF Annie
could so far forget herself g to acquire
the necessary ease and abandon, when
facing an audience. I think she would
sing very we'll" When she began her
professional career Miss Cary was griev-
ously v and constrained. BOSTON
Post.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
Youths Department.
LITTLE B 4DALR.

ne very oldest boy I know
II Robin Adair, with his head Of tow,
And his brave, bright eyes, where tho ques-
lions grow.
For this very strange boy is asking Why,
From the time that morning paints the sky
Till the sleepless stars look out on high:
1t has no Wings, and yet it can fiy-
And sister says wishes go just - high.
Why is oatmeal healthy and candy good?
Is il always naughty to do as you would2
This rose was a bua, and why did it burst?
This bird was an egg, and which came first
The egg or the birdI and how was it nursed?
What is the wind? and where does il stay;
When il bushes itself and creeps awayF
Is it crying or singing! and what does il say?
Why does the sun sleep back of the trees
At home when in summer he takes his ease
All nightin the rocking bed Of the seass
Why is it bad for boys to fight?
And for sOldier-men SO brave and right2
Why do I love you best at night?
Why do the oaks and elms stand tall,
W it'll their xnaried old branches ready to falll
Why does a great, strong gentleman ride
In 4 carriage, pTstty, and soft and wide,
And q tired old woman walk by the side2
All! Robin, I'll neither laugh nor cry;
But I'll tell you IA secret, deep and high:
The Grown-up children keep asking why.
And the answers are somewh re safe and fair
Beyond the stars and the suir-lit air
For men and women and Got Adair.
-Funaic Z. Robinson, in Wide ApGke.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
HUMOROUS.

Personal: John, come back; all is
forgiven! Pa kicked the wrong ma
He did not know it was you.-Stella.
-"What makes you look 20 deathly
sick, Tommy" swell. the fac # the
matter is, I've been taking my first
chew, and I am only q amac6ewer."
Mrs. Dc Nudle-"Oh, MI. Cattle
rancho, tell me, are you esthetic?" Mr..
Cattleranche-"Oh, dear, no, madame.
not at all. Neyec had anything the
matter with me in my life"
1t is rather unpleasant to hear .
public speaker remark: my friends
ur, 1 wish to say q few words-ur on this
occasion-ur," etc.; but then we must
remember that to ur is human.
"A shoemaker states that there is no
money in building shoes for St. Louis
people. Queer! We thought that the
man who built a shoe for a St. Louisian
generally made a big thing of it.-Bos-
ton Post.
Six medical experts examined q
man as to his sanity, and were evenly
divided. After they had wrangled
about it for . week it was discovered
that they had examined the wrong per-
son altogether.
Some one took Charlie up and asked
him if he wa his papa's boy. He an
swered: yes" "And your mammals
boy, too? YES" replied Charlie.
SWELL. how a you be paps's boy and
mammals both at the same timer"
"Oh," replied Charlie, quite Indifferent
ly, "can't q wagon have two horses?"
Down at Old Bridge, in New Jer-
sey, q woman got a forlorn man SO
drunk he couldn't stand, and then she
sent for q Justice of the Peace, and
while some of the neighbors held the
unhappy and limber-jointed bacchanali-
an up, she married him That's the
kind of . hairpin a New Jersey woman
"mash," nc cold conventionalities of
our false and much veneered social in
stitutions may stand between her and
her love if applejack only holds out
HaUkeye.
She was a reel sweet-looking lady,
with a sealskin sacque and a big plush
hat, and she stood on the step of al up
town residence, having just pulled the
bell. IL called to see" said she to the
lady of the house, who was very red in
the face from frying doughnuts over the
kitchen fire, eff you wished to give
anything to the heather to-day" "No.
l don't want to give anything to the
heather to-day. 1 just gave the woman
next door a piece of my mind about her
scalawag of q boy that broke down my
plants. That's all I can afford for
the heather just now."-New Haven
Re0ister.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
Early Navigation.

Ever e e navigation open as early
IS this before?" he repeated, as he
glanced out of the window at the river
and settled back in his CHAIR bless
YOU; yes! Why, this is no spring at all
| compared to one we had along in the
forties. l don't exactly remember the
year, but well say 1874"
livery early, was it?"
"Yes, indeed. We only had seven
flakes of snow that whole winter, and
they fell in December. Only seven, sir,
and the other two men who kept count
with me are now up in the sail loft.
| Shall l call 'em DOWN."
"Oh, 10 matter. Was the river
frozen?"
mot the first sight of ice all winter"
ibid vessels continue to run?"
Right along without a break. On
| the 10th of January l sailed into Buffalo
with a cargo of wheat, and the weather
was so warm that the men walked the
decks barefooted. On the return trip l
was sun-struck off Point Au Pelee."
"Is that possible?"
THAT'S q dead fact. That was q sad
trip for me. both financially any physic-
all ~"
"Why, you didn't lose any money,
did you?"
mot on the cargo, but going of just
at the time l did and being gone eleven
days threw my garden patch all behind
and it never caught up"
but you got over the sun-stroke?"
mot entirely, and probably never
shall. l can't talk five minutes without
feeling dry. and if l should 60 to ask
you to have a glass of beer with me I'd
, stutter over it 50 long that you'd have a
chance to ask me twice to drink with
you. No, young man." he
continued, as he carefully put the glass
down, don't try to rush the season.
Early navigation has no money in it, and
it is full of perils. I've tried it. and the
result is an infirmity which will follow
me to my grave. l always smoke after
drinking, and yet-thanks-don't
care if 1 dol prefer dark and
yet-that is. don't rush things. There's
nothing gained by it"-DetrO1 Frss
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
ELIGIOUS AND EDUCATIONAL.

Kansas has 2O9 Presbyterian
cndhes with 1904 members.
=. Morgan Dix, of New York, has
assistant ministers in the Trinity
IN Griffith John, a missionary to
Cnina' u recent address in Glasgow.
s'ateu 4 China proper is now entirely
oPeneu the missionary and the Bible
coiPor.e with the single exception Of
one prevail capital-hat of Hanan.
-Iweip resbyteries in the United
rresoyteriaChurch have voted on the
overture retling the prohibition of in
strumentai sic. The voters are
counted 3y ombers, not by presby-
terles' ana loNave voted for and 122
against the mere,
1t is said /, ,b;s copntrv ia in.
deotea 70 nicna StOrrs Willis more
than to any othe,erson for the intro
duction OF collie songs. he having
taught the Yale stents fbe Latin sonS
u -1andeamus, itch he had learned
i tne GERMAN onirsities.
Sir William Blastona tel,s ma that
marriage was declal an ecclesiastical
contract by Pope lucent IN. A. d.
1893. Our W imrssion is that he
has placed the date so, 5000 wears too
late, for we trace it ba .s , ~reI;gions
rite to the early days or ieu.-CTarch-
man.
Among the New Yol pastors who
object to opening p~ublilibraries on
Sunday aro hr ynhn Hale -,
Taylor. DIR. Sabine and F;,er Tboma.
S. Preston. Among thoseho SUPPORT,
Joseph II. Choate's pro,sit;op r.
open them are DIR. J. P. NeWan. Rob
ert Collyer and Rev. Heber Nwton.
Harvard students are org,izino ,
tOtal-abstinence society on ,nm0n.
sense principles. 1t is to be ''f. from
pledges. bigotry and importantly an(
based on common sense. self-Lnec,
and gentlemanliness." The societwil
favor total abstinence, but 4 mebe
will be allowed freely to withdraw t,r
the organization whenever he finds a
practice of its principles too much =
him. Rev. Phillips Brooks and Pro
James are to deliver lectures before tn
society.
The public schools of the State
New York were las; year attended b
1,O21, 282 children, a smaller number b
10000 than was recorded in 1880. {
the 3O.826 teachers employed, %. II
were women. The average annual sa
airy of each teacher was 1915. O6. til
whole amount expended in salaries b.
ing 81, IT'S, sos. %. The State has l1.24
school districts and IL, 1874 schOOl-hOuse.
The total amount expended upon tn
schools last year was $40, 500. 8O2. 40
N. Y. Examiner.
The Indian University. at Tail.
quah. Ind. Ter. reports an increase {
students and an advance of proicieno
this year. Three young men are study
ing for the ministry, and quite a nun
Der are preparing to teach. It hi
been proposed to remove the institutio
to the limits of the Creek Nation, and
fine site has been granted for that pun
pose. The great need. however, is for
building fund to erect buildings of brio
or stone to accommodate two hundre
students. Rev. A. c. Bacone is Pres
dent of the institution.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14

Every people is known by its Jokes.
Men are least restrained in their mirth,
and give therein the largest play of
their likes and dislikes. The humor of
Harry Fielding, Thackeray tells us, is
wonderfully wise and detective; it
flashes upon . rogue and lightens up .
rascal like q policeman's lanthorn- The
same may be said of the humor of
Rabelais, though the objects of its ridi-
cule are not always cheats and scamps.
The difference between opera bou6e and
Anglo-SaxA farce represents the differ
ence between the life of the French and
the life of the English. With the Amer
leans it Is not the snob and the husband
who are satirized; our domestic jocosity
embraces chiefly the small boy, the
widow and the mother-in-law, reserving
for its most palpable hits the bully, the
visionary Spectator, the gamester and
the commercial agent Thus American
humor may be divided into two classes
that which relates to fighting and that
which relatts to money. In the South
the general classification grows still
narrower, gaining, however, in whimsi-
cality and local color what it lacks in
breadth.
There can be no installing the origin
of the old story of the traveller who
asked . Mississippian whether it was
worth his while to carry . pistol, and
was told: "Well, stranger, you mout
nov around here moren q year an
never need q pistol; but eff you should
happen to need one, you'd need it pow
erful." Equally characteristic is the
record of a well-known Tennessee case.
The principal witness for the common
wealth testified that he was gent to get
a fresh pack of cards, that he got them.
and, returning, sat down in the grass.
Here he baked in his testimony, and
would 90 no further. At last, after
cross-questioning and coaxing had been
exhausted, the Judge threatened him
with fine and Imprisonment, whereupon
he said: please, your Honor, If I
must tell how l drapped in the jimson
weeds, l suppose I must. 1t was just,
your Honor, TO look oper the kerds and
mark the bosDers." The following Incl
dents no less reflect the local color of
the ante-bellum days: Two Kentucki-
ans went to settle their bill At a hotel in
Boston. There being . di,pute about
the amount, ohe Of them grew angry
and began to swear, when the other
said: Remember, John, who you ore.
Remember you are . Kentuckian. Pay
the amOunt and shoot tie seoHndreL"--
Henry Watters0n, in tie Century.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
Emma'S Ambition.

20 mammal she said, looking up
| with flushed face; There is Just the
loveliest story in here! 1t is about a
little girl who was only ten years old,
and her mother went away to see a sick
sister, and vas gone for a whole week;
and this little girl made tea and toast,
and baked potatoes, and washed the
dishes, and did every single thing tor
her father; kept house, you know. man.
ms. Now, I'm most ten years old, and
l could keep house for papa. l wish
you would 90 to Aunt Nellie's and stay
a whole month. and let me keep house.
l know how to make toast, mamma.
Just splendidly! and custard, and Hattie
said she would teach me how to make
ginger-cake. some day. Won't you
please to go, mammal"
81 don't think l could be coaxed to
do it," said Mrs. Eastman. 1.-The
mother of that little girl in the book,
probably, knew that she could trust her
little daughter; but l should expect you
and fly to the gate. if you heard a sound
that interested you; and | should expect
the potatoes to burn in the oven while
you played in the sand at the door. 1
couldn't trust you in the least"
Mammal said Emma, with surprise
and indignation in her voice. "Why do
you say that? You have never tried me
at all. Why do you think l wouldn't do
as well as a girl in q book"
Haven't 1 tried you. dear? Do you
know it is just three-quarters of an hour
since l sent you to dust the sitting-rOom
and put everything in nice order for me?
Now look at those books, tumbled up
side down on the floor, and those pa
pers blowing about the room, and the
duster on the chair, and your toys on
the table; while my little girl reads q
story about another little girl who
helped her mother"
30, WE'LL" said Emma, her cheeks
very red, "that is different; nothing but
this old room to dust. If l had some
thing real grand to do. like keeping
house for papa, you would see how hard
l would work; I wouldn't stop to play.
or to read. or anything"
Emma. dear, perhaps you will be
surprised to hear me say So, but the
words of Jesus Christ show that you are
mistaken"
Mamma" said Emma, again, and
her voice showed that she was very
much surprised.
"They certainly do-listen: He that
is faithful in that which is least, is
faithful also in much; and he that is
unjust in the least, is unjust also in
much
'.And once he said to a man: well
done, good and faithful servant, thou
hast been faithful over a few things;
1 will make thee ruler over many
things Can l say that to you this
morning."-Pansy.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
KENDALL's SPAWN CURE;


Read below of its wonderful effects as Il liniment for the hu ian family.
iEMATfTE. MISSOURI. usstm 1880
BJ, KENDALL X o MIS- am so Overi1yed in view OF 1.-THE result of IN APP
sestIon OF you hendaiTs SPAWN ue that. feel that ought for .Humsnities
uy horse, l was injured lin one of ny testhce>, M frOmt hattf i'm. to threew weeks
aga low ut constant enlargement mas been the result, gNn. NE 4 great amOunt
M ouble, almost entirely preventing I'M from horseback riding. which vas ny
u0w way Of travelling. saw anOticeo yOu Kendall SPAWN { ue, never nee
unoht oft for nythinge except for hors"s, but after receiving he medicine ad
Eea" over what it was good for feeling terribly exercised about nv difficulty for
n'uorsul many physicians nj none gave me an specific mt whe it could
E Ee enhTed no longe to remore it with thu knn".. | applied your ken!ars SPAWN
- me IAN experiment, and it was so painful in its application thai concluded
n me W 10 peat it M thought no more ahuti tuntln near u week, and 10 and behold
piled 1T OR again. and ave made in all about = dozen appGc tin> running over
= pace oFw weeks ant the terrible nlargemtnt is almost n &c, in view Of which
1 eannnot eNeS my feelings of delight. Ii has been = God send to me-. may he
SEMI TO otrs with ike troubles. joHN RICE.
1astor HematiteC congregational Church.
-; l. are at liberty to put thisi in n shape Vol may please. | am not
ashaheu Unse ~ name under, over or By the side o it,.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
KENv SPAWN CURE!

blister, yet 1t Is peetrating m powerful to reach IN deep seated pain or to re-
NOV any pony grEth or any other nlar@emcn if Used for several days, such ~
ssa : . III. sPnn ntS,c aous. sprains. swelling, N laneness ant ali Lrr%enenE of
tne JonIs OF hHDs. e rheumatism in MAJ ant for any purpose for Which hnimen
Is used 10 man or best. 1t il. no. known to be the best iniment for man cyeru used
acting mia yet eertali in its effects. 1t is used in full strength with perfect safety
st all seasons Of III yer.
Send address, for uIStratedC Circular which we think gives positive proof of its
N0 remedy IA metw with suahu npmii d success to or knowledge, for
o~@taS well Is man ffe 81 per bottle. or sX botties for s.
ALL DRUGGISTS have it or can get it for you,
IL WI De sent 10 my adressO o. receipt of prize by the proprr"tors-
AZ Dr. b.. KENDALL " co. EIosburg Falls, Vermont.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14

There is still living in Prussia alady
who in her youth was on friendly and
intimate terms with Goethe. She is now
the Baroness Ulrike Won Lewitzoff, her
ege is nearly ninety, and her home is al
the sastle Of Teziblitz, in Lobositz, WHERE
she lives in great retirement
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
KENDALL'S SPAWN CURE;

ON HUNIN FLESH at has been 0scerHtincd Gy repeated tr rs 10 be.
The rery best Imminent erer usd. for any deer seated PAIN Of tony Stondi"y
O Of short duration. Also for CORNS, EI'NIONS. FROSE BITES
or any 6ruse "a o tr"e"ess. Some are Gf"d 10 use ii on ha nH flesh
simply because IL is a horse medhine, bit yu shoHN remember that rhat
is good for BE4ST is good for NV: nd IRE k"on from Experience
tn at "KENDALLS SPA YIN CURE" "a be used OR q ciHd year
old rMh perfect saty It's Effects are roadeJm on hannah flesh ard IL
does rot Ulster or make a sore. TRY II ad be conrhaced.
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14

h0na week in your W town. s.
XhhOutft free. No risk. Every
OOOthing new. Capital not re-
quired. We will furnish you
everything. Many are making fortunes
Ladies make as much as men, and DO
and girls make great pay. Reader, #
YOU want a business at which you can
make great pay all the time you work,
write for particulars to Ii. HALLETT 4
Co., Portland, Maine. 4Jan-y
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
1870. 1882.
Columbus gonrnaI
Is conducted as q
CAMu W NEWSPAPER
FAMILY NEWSPAPER,

Devoted to the best mutual inter-
ests of its readers and its publish
ers. Published at Columbus. Platte
county, the centre of the agricul-
,ural portion of Nebraska,it Is read
by hundreds of people east who are
looking towards Nebraska as their
inture home. Its subscribers in
portion of the community, as Is
evidenced by the fact that the
JOURNAL has never contained u
"dun" against them, and by the
other fact that
The Columbus journal., 1882-06-14
KENDALL'S SPAWN CURE!

FOR AN IT'S q
KNOW y TO BIZ ONE
OF THE bESi IL
NOT THE BrST
Ii lMENr EVER