Arizona weekly citizen., 1881-09-11
Fne;s nna Fancies.

rt is announced officially by the health i authorities at New Orleans that there ! has not been single case Of yellow fever in that city this year, nor any case nearer than the Ship Island Quarantine < ltio1. That accounts for New Orleans being SD forgotten, of late
 A Philadelphia paper asserts that suckinc-pigs and cOcoanuts are the trac- tiaual currency of King kGlakaua's do. mans. Imagine the cOnsternaton oi tbe foreirner who siiDgs out dollar bill for nickel cigar and Is given a ht- ter of pigs III change.-Detrcit Free Press.
 Never does fellew feel more lone some and homesick than when he Las left his own watch at the jewellers Tor repairs and is carrying around one DOT rowed for tlc occasion he reels II Ae the man who has sent ls vile t0 the seaside and is taking hls meals down towh.-Low. Cit.
 But about this cigarette business-J'ist 20 to sleep, brethren, and don't worry heci.use cigarette smoking Las tei'd- llcg to destroy life. Just remeihtGI that the boy who smokes VIII generally he improved by killing, and lot hiia thus woik out his own Improsrr,eIi- D -lI- Flaw keye
 Snubbins and his wife we're ciscussing ! their favorite authors the other evenlng, when Mrs. $. suddenly remark ui,to Ter ' dear: "Snubbius, who wOUld you say now was my favOrite author: 'Quafis, my love, Francis Quarls" Her turn ! turn came shortiy.-AndreWs Bazaar.
 The New York Times says: '.iI. 1l- .. N N..a sH 2 D. s. ca candidate, and be compared tu burned ont firework. No matter; he iuteia.s Co run again for the GoveruO:sbip oi tins State and to be a candidate fer inc Dem Ocratic Presidential nomination m 1881.
 "Nfy brethren said Western minis ter, ''the preaching If tine gospel to some people is like pouring water over g. sponge-it sOaks in and stays. To oth- CTS it is like wind blowing through g. chieken-coop. My experience of ths congregation is that 1t contains more chicken-coops than sponges-
 The latest freak comes this time in breaches which caricature the words co. yOu dear and " c, you duck, by a gold letter c iaterlaCed with bronze |, and steel miniature of deer or a ducS. If the inceutor had any iudgment ! the pin designed for himselt would have tle letters encircie a iackass.
 | Wien an American clergyman goes abroad Co visit an English brother, it disguSts him on returning to find that on tLat day each bad a roll of his old ser mons out and they were looking over them and they accidentally got mixed, he took the wrong bundle and brought home his own sermons. And the En- glishman Is disgisted too.
 \ police magistrate is questioning a tramp whose bearing indicates that he has seen better days. You look as If you had been a gentleman" he remarks. @ ] e, sir, says the prisoner with a sigh, "oHce, sir, l was worth several millions. |" (.amhled, eh." No, sir" "Squan- | dcrcd it in riotCus living wine and ,r men. chg" " No, sir" Then to what vice were you addicted:" Friend sL- ,, sir
 Prayer of tie Highlander in a terrific storm. and Lis fishing boat at the mercy Of the waves: les, c, miclity, for gra- cious Lord, TuucaH's an awfu tecf; he stole Macquilim's nets and hens, and promised me the hauf; but never did l get a broom papers worth. It Is twenty wears this very day since | s)cht a favor from you, and I'll warran- ye if you'll tak us safe into CgmpbelltOwn it'll be as long agin afore I'll ask anither.
 Boy, you are practicing rifle and pistol shooting, bowie knife fencing and box
 ing to fit yourself for fIontiersmaR? There you're all wrongl If you want to be ga great scout" practice wearing your hair long, bummin1 around Ginmllls, drinking at other folks expense, telling heathenish lies about your own exploits, and be prepared to go under a bed when Indians or a fight threaten. These are the qualifications of a "Conanche Bilf' or a "Texas Jack '- Exchange.