The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-06-30
IN A NUTSHELL.

IN A NUTSHELL.
There are 5S5 Chinese children in tn
San Francisco public schools. ~ u
By the desire of the late King Of
Prussia his heart was inferred in
heartshapen marble casket at the foot
of his parents grave.
A cynical old bachelor says that
"lovers are like armies. They get along
we'll enough until the engagement be-
gins.
An easy way to make hard water
soft is this Gill the wash boiler with
hard water, then put half teacup-
full of wood ashes into n little cloth bag,
let this lie in the water until that is
warm enough to use. This is worth
knowing. .t1E
Gust think of it!" exclaimed Jones;
"Pingrey's new block is one thousand
meters long" "Is that SOP" asked Fogg,
adding, "By the way, Jones, how long
is meter" "Blamed IF know" said
Jones, but judging from the distance
my gas meter covers every month it
must be immense" 8ta0s
eli! where did you get them
trowsers?' asked an Irishman of man
who happened to be passing with re.
markably short pair of trowsers. 81
got them where they grew,".was the in
dignant reply "Then by my con
science" said Pat you've pulled them
a year too soon."
How wonderful are the revelations
of science. Ithas been estimated that
a boy can hear call to dinner though
a mile away, in a thousandth part OF a
second. But a call to duty. Well, we
don't wish to be hard on the boy. but
it often takes lifetime for him to
undertand it.
A New York lady vino in conse-
quence of great reverse of fortune,
has been working for fashionable
milliner, says she is absolutely amazed
to find to what an extent in the days of
her wealth she was swindled III her
bonnets and dresses.
"My son Albert" said a fond New
Haven mother, sis very popular He
seems to know all the girls. " "Hush,'
said the neighbor who was leaning over
the fence. "He must be terribly miss
informed" 1t isn't known which of the
women tainted.
Twenty-one princes and twenty-eight
princeses are loafing around Paris with
no visible means Of support. The
princeses being poor, the impecunious
princes turn the cold shoulder to them
and 60 and hunt the ight-headed
American heiresses.
Miss Gordon-Cummings says that
venerable cannibal in New Zealand
whom she visited, in company with an
obese divine, stroked down and gently
prodded the reverend gentleman in n
manner painfully suggestive of Sydney
Smiths joke of "Coid curate on the
sideboard."
In Iowa, a young man named Isaac
Hood committed suicide because
young lady refused to marry him. The
coroner's inquest developed mitigating
circumstances. 1t seems that Hood
asked the young lady to marry him,
and she responded, ike Hood not. 4
As soon as Hood saw the point, he fed
with the result stated. The young lady
has not been arrested.
Captain John M. Gill of Pekin, KY,
owns one Of Santa Annals wooden legs.
During the Mexican war Captain Gill
then q young man, was n member Of
the Fourth Illinois regiment, and
fought in the battle of Cerro Gordo.
Santa Anna was on the field at the
opening of the engagement, being in
carriage drawn by six mules. When
he realized that the Yankees were vic
torious and that he was in danger OF
capture, the Mexican general pulled
off his wooden leg left tin the carriage,
and mounting mule, in light flying
order escaped. Captain Gill was the
first American to reach the carriage,
and thus obtained the curious trophy.
cts wicked, it's shameful, it's a dis
grace to society, this flirting with mar
ried women" remarked middle-aged
lady with spectacles and sharp Wis
sage, to her travelling companion. He
was nice looking man, and replied by
saying:
"Ah, then you are not married."
mo-" she said tenderly, moving a
little closer to him, and gazing at him
through her glasses with adie-away ex
preston, like that of setter puppy
with the distemper. "No."
Then he asked her if she wouldn't
like some peanuts, and left the car to
get them; but he didn't come back
again.