National Republican., 1881-08-19
PUCK ON CHRISTIANITY.
A Few Points About CreduIity and Enects
without Q. Cause.

without n Cause.
To the Editor Of THE REPUBLICAN;
While admitting atheism and infdelity
TO your liberal columns, you welcome Christianity
as well; and send you herewith, as a supple
ment to my travesty the "merry goats Of Ephe-
sus," published last Tuesday a paragraph of their
playful philosophy, exhausted II is true, about
three thousand years ago in the celebrated school
OF Ella, In Greece but galvanized into quasi vi
tality by merry fawns and satyrs throughout tho
Christian era. From Democritus and Lucippus to
THE MERRY AND DIssoLuTE ALcBApEs;
from Aclbindes to the lascivious Agrippa from
Agrppa to Robespierre, Danton, and Diderot, face
tious or grave fwns and satyrs have ridiculed re-
hgion while feeding on the very vines which re-
hgion had planted and while sheltered by the
civilizations according to an admission of voltaire
and Rousseau) which religion had founded. One
oftheir last efforts, published In THE REPUBLICAN,
was summary by "student" of what he con-
siders the presumptuous and absurd sayings Of
Jesus Christ, such as 81 am the Light of the
world" lie that hath seen Me hath seen the
Father" Thou art Peter. and on this rock build
My church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail
against II" " Heaven and earth shall pass away,
but My word shall not pass away" Lol lam with
you always, even TO the end of the world" &c.
YOUR FELIcIToUs "srupEST"
asks the pertinent question, "what would be
thought of preacher utterlng such nonsense in
the streets Of Washington" l know not what
others might think, but my own credulity suggests
that this Washington preacher, whether white or
colored-whether Jasper, of astronomic fame, or
our comic Ingcrsoll-would have two thousand
years from now, gorgeous temples erected to honor
him In every part of the civilized world, great
marble books spread out and perused by the gifted
and good, though little understood by "thc merry
goats of Ephesus" browsing about them that
without the sensuality of Mahomet or Joe Smith
u entice them, his followers could be
NUMBERED ONLY by MILLIONS;
that the wisest statesmen the most splendid
orators and poets, painters, sculptors, architects
and philosophers would PROSTATE their learning
and genius in adoring love at his feet; that oil
along the whole track of Time, from the year 1881
A. ID. back to the age of Jasper, Ingersoll, and
Guiteau, would be found the fulfllment of his
predctons;i Il that his mother, though the poorest
woman In America, would be not only honored
throughout the world, but would become the
watchword of womanhood; advancing from the
harem TO home from slavery to freedom, would
place the seal of a sacrament ON the marriage
couch, and, by pacifyng society," elevate the state
Slavery would be abolished in every land rs the
followers of
JESUS CHRIST ABOLISHED IT
in Europe by the gracious MAXIM "In Christ is
neither bond nor free" Hospitals for infancy
old age, and misfortune, now quite unknown
would welcome the weary wherever the sun
shines, and the words, "Inasmuch as ye have
done 1t unto the least theseye have done It unto
me-" would, IN honor of Ingersoll and Jasper, be
chanted to musical thunder by all mankind. I
suggest that learning Iwould be preserved from
every barbaric incurson by the faithful disciples
OF our Washington preacher. They would plant
new vines about the temple of Ephesus for
THE MERRY GOATS TO FEED ON
while buting at its sublime architrave or bleating
contemptuously at Minerva, Just stepping from the
cloud to its summit In one word, his church
would be the native home Of all lofty intelligence
rs well as the asylum for bruised hearts Although
poor itinerant lecturer to-day, our Washington
preacher would remain through all time the most
loved and honored of mankind. And when heaven
and earthshould pass away this same poor non
sensical and presumptuous ranter would be turned
to imploringly by the last man of an expiring and
burning world. Such is my faith in Ingersoll and
Jasper and in some other itinerant preachers.
ROBERT, IN HUMILITY.
may call me creduous, for he often ridicules the
credulity Of Christians; but how credulous would
be the man two thousand years from now Should
all, or even greater part OF these things, come to
pass who should deny that the Washington
preacher was diyinel How credulous the crank
who believes In chance and peddes for vile lucre
the very stuff which has disguised all lofty and
pure and logical minds from Plato to Augustine,
hohi auBustiic W Dcrnurui from bernard 10 " the
hope Of the schools" from the divine Aquin to
Father Secchi, of our own timel oh. how very
credulous the poor fool who believes that all the
harmonies of the universe came by chance, and
that our Washington preacher, whom have
FOLLOWED THEORETICALLY
for two thousand years, achieved so much by acci
dent, having only run Of luck" to distinguish
him from other crazy or designing cranks! What
Effects without cause Oh, credulity, credulity,
how laughable thou art!
How like an ostrich with his head In sand
While Logic, slow OF foot, comes up behind;
Loud laughing at an ugly thing,
But hesitating how to Kick
"Ah, me! what fools these mortals be!