St. Landry democrat., 1881-01-01
ALL SORTS.

Do,o ucIyhortIcberry heard her n1hs l,.
nos' a.o,i ert " at the dinner table the QUIZ
aav tI that that Kismet meant "fate," ant, 'i'ac ,ar
ia I tbc ere reason why she so astonlslieu, no 20
mistress hy relnarking the ncxt u'tR bR,;n.
Relinda. the clambermaid ). "Vh, nl oh;l-
dy' can't scarely walk wild the rpnh- p
hlains all over me two k'smcts'
lie Opinion.
The Locomotive publishes; engras,,nsts IKE
in each issue showing how n0lie'i e'dioaonit
after they have exploded. Ih'S SThet uu is
seem to hit the case at an. hn;ler
Iooks inst before it is going to explouefc
We could then learn when to get o"' u
thc vay.-INew Haven Register.
care you fond of turkey with tru1ne?s'
Mr.. Smitl, ?" asked the boarding lhls-
trcss with an inslnuatlng sns awav
"Ycs'm,r replied Smith, tugglng aWay th;s
at the drumstick on his plate oue !, 9pnao snao
turkey. ma'am is a trntfie tough oo'
ton Transcript.
4 number Of California po1EeI'S' re- re-
Gently drank a cask of wine, anu M . ce
came "as drunk as hogs" 1t was st9h-
ingly illustrated that drunkenness ~
lures the appearance of a hog, notMion
Standing some men think they. appear
to better advantage with drink OF t"o
down to sharpen their wlts.-lninS~
hampton Republican.
Her Inns we're like tho leaves; he saio'
BY autumn's c"iInson tinted
Some people autumn leaves preserve
BY pressing them, abe hln,ed
The meaning Of the gentle hiht
The lover did discern. ,
And 80 lie claspcd her round MS heth'
And glued his lips to her,n ,,.,,,,a
A good story was told some years ago
of q Galveston colored gregatlon,
, whose pastor had bucked off the Sunday
! school fund ut monte: tie was uulS
| tried and the verdict "Iho Key. 4Ath
inadub am acquitted of the ain or gamp-
| ling, provided he pays the money Dach
| bv next Sunday night. In the mean
time de- members ob dis cor grcgation is
warned agin playing kearas with brud-
der Bredso.'
Every body has heard OF the jolly
| Dutchman, who, when the steamboat
was likely to sink, succeeded, after much
! trouble, in finding life-preserver large
enough to fit him. While he was trying
| his best to blow it up, young ielioW
standing by said: lyon can't ill that
I With Wlnn lC leaks. Dou you no1x ~
siss 2" "Isl dot so !" he replied. "Vell
keep dc Wind in myself
1t was at q late quarterly meeting OF
| the Seventh Day Baptist churches III
Wisconsin that two clergyman were to
present papers on the same day, and the
question OF precedence having arisen,
! Mr.. A. sprang to his feet and said, Il
think brother B. ought to have the best
place on the programme ; he is aD older
man than am, and besides, is full OF
! his subject" When the audience re-
memberet that Brother BIS subject was
"The Devil,"a cheerful smile seemed to
beam around the assembly.
The story of the man, who, having
hired horse to attend II funeral and
was cautioned against overdriving, said
he would keep up with the procession it
he killed the horse, is retOld IN differ
ent shape of an Illinois candidate for
nomination to Office. Wishing to reach
the convention at u distant town, he
hired horse at livery stable. In spite
Of the candidates pounding and swear
ing, the animal was so slow that the
man did not get there until the conven-
ton had adjourned, and SO he lost his
nomination.. He denounced thg owner
for giving him such beast. The pro-
discovered that the hostler had let him
have one of the hearse horses. "Hearse
horse, hearse ~ cried tho baffied politi-
; clan. why, il Il man should start to a
funeral with such horse as that he
would not reach the grave till two weeks
after the resurrection