davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09
JOB PRE.T"TEVG
SOME VERY EXACT STATgS.
TICS.

A Detroiter has been for the
last Two years collecting and ar
ranging statistics Of an old na-
-ture, and if his book is ever pub,
lished readers will find nothing
dry about it. He goes right to
business on page one by estima
ting that the mum Der of lickings
received by the average boy up to
his fourteenth year is l25. This
includes the spanking process
during infancy.
Out of every 100000 people ir
this country $4,000 get up cross
in the morning, but only 100 orso
remain in that condition very long
after breakfast.
Out Of $4,000 men only 5000
will put up money on bet. The
rest will crawish around and
finally back water on their asser-
tions.
Only 10 women out of every 500
who start out on a journey by
railroad consult a railroad map or
have the least idea Of the direc-
tion they take. Four hundred and
ninety-eight worry about their
baggage; 4e7 are certain they
took the wrong train 494 wish
they had never started.
The risk Of being bitten by
dog is greatly over-estimated. Out
Of every 1000 big and little dogs
only two care to get up row
with the human race, aud these
TWO are ready and willing to die.
The number Of men who can
put in a moro pleasant evening
down town than at their. own
freside is on the decrease, and
the number Of wives who are
taking a little extra pains 10
make home more pleasant than a
concert saloon is on the increase.
Out Of every. 1000 men who
get mad and swear they'll see a
lawyer about it, only fifteen carry
out their intentions.
Out of every 1000 women who
ride on street cars: only twelve
will move along to offer another
woman chance to,sit down. Nine
hundred and ninety-eight Of them
| argue that it is mans duty to
stand up, even if there is plenty OF
room, and the other two. are
suprenely Indifferent. ..s
Only one woman in 5000 pays
the first price asked for a bonnet,
and only one millinor in 100000
expects her to.
The time occupied by the ave-
rage man in buying full suit Of
clothes is just one-fourth the time
occupied By the average woman
in buying a single pair of stock.
ings.-Detroit Free Press.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

A AChicago girl overdid the dec
orative art business. She orna--
men ted the kitchen range with
grass and ferns, so that when ltwas
red hot the mimic vegetation look
ed cool and inviting. Her lover
found her one day; like Werther's
"Charlotte," cutting bread and
butter. The decorative stove Sc
duccd him to sit squarely upon it
while be piled the fair creature
with the honey Of his compli-
ments. He now bears the letters
Eureka, No. s, and, in revenge,
has gone to St. Lonts to swell the
census.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09
TIE BEST PAPER! Try 1t !!
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TEIRTy-SIXTE YEAR.
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t MUM & CO., 81 Park Row, New York.
Branch Office, Cor. F & 7th sts:, Washington
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The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09
Original s Story.
WRITTEN FOE THE NEwBERRY HEEALD.[
IS w AITINGo -
Rv CLYDE w A ME.
CHAPTER I.

A long, cool, piazza, shaded BY
tall oaks, from whose branches
dropped long festoons Of moss,
which hung almost in reach from
the caves of the house. A rustic
bench in a corner and seated on
this, lost in the beauties OF the
fair July twilight, we see the hg-
ure of fair young girl. A face
of unusual beauty and expression
eyes of the deepest blue, and hair
of wavy brown tresses colled care
lessly over brow of snowy
whiteness, a brow whereon no
sorrow has yet left it's impress.
This is the picture that greets
the eye of the young man who
pauses in the doorway a smile OF
pleased surprise On his handsome
face.
at length he advances, and the
young girl rises hastily to meet
him.
There is genuine pleasure in the
fair young face as she extends her
hands with the greeting:
oh, Jerold, I'm so glad you've
come! / told Mama verify be,
Iiered you had forgotten your old
friends.'
Forgotten you, EIeane! How
absurd the idea. But l am so de,
lighted to find you still the little
Eleane of old times | was afraid
the Boarding.School life would
spoil you,' he replied, merry
twinkle in the black eyes.
We'll you see they have not
And now, sir, explain yourself. l
have been home a whole week:
ard this is your first visit. Shame
you naughty boy?
Pray do not condemn TIL you
have heard my story. l, too, just
arrived at. home on last evening
So, you see, you have been my 7rs7
thought. There now!' oh, well
you know you ought = with an
impatient toss Of the brown head
'Aud pray why ought [? he
said. Am | still Miss Melville's
little school boy Champion, that
I do not act with out her appro
baton .
Although this was said IN a jest
ing manner Eleane felt hurt.
Certainly I do not,' she sale
angrily. 'Mr. Southern is not al
all like the school boy left three
years ago. l, perhaps, am a little
disappointed at the change, anc
pray pardon for the freedom !
have taken Minnie and hel
mother came out just then, ane
the war of words was stopped
so, Jerold, you have come.
see,' said the elder lady, cordially
welcoming him. Yes, Aunt, bu
am almost sorry that have
EIeane has been giving me a lee
ture on my hardness, and when
explain thai | have been absent
and called Immediately on my re
turn, she quietly informs me tha
[ am not at all ike Sne naO e4
pected to find me-
Mama, | did no such thing
But he called me Hiss Meluilie ;
and, in spite Of her anger Elsau
could not help smiling at her Owl
absurdily.
so that is what has rouse(
you; Eh, Miss?' Jerold said laugh
| ing, as Mys. Melville lett th
gronp. i anu very glad, L assur
you, l found the new appelIatlo'
a rather awkward one. But
thought you would not condescen
TO familiarity now
What nonsense you two q
talk Minnie said. where nav
YOU beon, Jerold 2
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

An eccentric Englishman, long
a resident of Paris, has just COM
mitted suicide, after having de-
voted twenty years to strange
mania. Every six months he had
a coffin made for himself: Each
was too long, too short, or uncom-
Portable in some way, until the;
last proved perfect. Having no
other object in life, he killed him
self.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

AS girls advance toward wo-
manhood many Of their notions
undergo change. For instance,
when small they believe in the
man in the moon; at maturer
years they believe in the man in
the honeymoon.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09
Miscellaneous. g
THEENCOME TAX TEST CASE
The Supreme Court sAfirming the Acts Con-
stitutionallty.

WASHINGTON, Jan. 25.-In 1867
the Collector of Internal Revenue
at Springfield, ILL.,, made distraint
up the homestead Of the Hon.
VIM. N. Springer Of that city,
now prominent member Of Con
gress, for the purpose Of collect
ing an income tax with Springer
had neglected and refused to pay.
In March of that year the prop
erty was sold and was declared
by the Collector to be purchased
by him for the United States.
Mr.. Springer failed to avail himself
Of the provision Of the law which
allowed him within one year after
the sale to redeem his property,
and.in 1874 the Collector executed
a deed Of it to the United States,
Circuit Court at Springfield to
eject Mr.. Springer from the prem
ises. 1t resulted in a decision in
favor Of the United States. Mr..
Springer thereupon appealed to
the Supreme Court Of the United
States, which yesterday affirmed
the judgment of the court below.
The principal and, in fact, the
only important question presented
to. this court was whether the in.
come tax, to collect which Mr..
Springer's property had been soldr
was direct tax, and, as such, for
hidden by the ninth section Of the
first article Of the Constitution
unless apportioned among the
States upon the basis Of compare
tive population, or whether it was
an indirect tax which Congress
had constitutional power to i'm
pose. The question is one which
has been often discussed, and
which the Supreme Court has
severa! times come near settling,
but no final decision of it has ever
been made until now.
Mr.. Springer contended that
the income tax Was a direct
tax within the meaning Of the
constitutional prohibition that
Congress had no lawful power
to impose such tax without
apportioning it among the States,
according to their population, and
that therefore all the proceedings
which resulted in the seizure and
sale of his property were illegal
and void.
The Supreme Court holds, in an
elaborate opinion by Justice
Swayne:
/. That direct taxes, within the
meaning of section 9, article l Of
the Constitution, are Of two kinds:
> and two kinds only, viz, taxes on
real property and capitatlon, OF
poll taxes.
) 2. That since the income taz
here in controversy was neither
tax on real estate nor poll tax
it was not a direct tax within the
meaning Of the. Constitution, ane
!, was not forbidden by article l
= section 9 Of that instrument.
3. That it came properly withir
the category of al excise or duty
! which the Congress Of the United
! States had full and costitutiona
power TO impose.
f The judgment Of the Circul
/. Court is therefore affirmed.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

A lump of bread about the size
Of a billiard ball, tied up in a linen
bag and placed in the potin which
greens are boiling, will absorb
the gases which ottentimes send
such an unpleasant odor TO the
reoions above.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

"If 1 punish you," said a mann
ma to he little girl, "you don't
suppose I do so for pleasure 90
you?' "Then whose pleasure is 1t
for, mamma? ?"
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

Although very early this sea-
son, it has already beensdiscov-
cred that during the present win
ter ice will' as usual, freeze with
the slippery side up.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

Then she remem bered the, look
he gave her when be had praised
her voice, and she had almost de.
termined to believe him true.
And she thought of the coming
stranger, and an exultant smile
played round her lips as she
thought:
I'll fix you: old fellow! You
shall yet repent those words ot
yours )" and ended her reflections
with the rather too audible re-
mark, 'E[e shall see.'
who shall see ? And who are
you so fercely threatening, little
Miss p Jerold asked with a smotb-
cred laugh in his voice, and q smile
of mischief lurking in the dark
eyes.
'Jerold = she said, rising hastily,
4 am surprised at your conduct
Eavesdropping, | see, is one of
your many faults. But, perhaps,
if you had heard some of the un-
uttered Thoughts you would not
now be in. such a lively bumor,
with a glance of impatience, while
a deep flush dyed her face and
neck.
why, EIeauel What do you
mean? Have l, by word or act:
insulted my little Queen ? If so:
l beg your pardon. and pray re-
ceive me again into your good
graces. But, really, am at a loss
TO fathom the mystery
Yes, you have!. But will not
tell you how. And you need moi
look so doleful as though my gooc
opinion were Of such immense val
ue.'
She had unintentionally let b ea
secret out, and Jerold looked bott
surprised and amused.
who has been telling you tales
Eleane? Your good opinion is al
l want, and you know this as wei
ss I do. But don't leave me
Eleane. l have something to say,
trying to detain her as she rose tt
go.
Then come to the house, for
will not stay here any longer
Just a short while. | want tx
convince you that do value you
opinion and l.
Hush! l am going. You cal
come to the house if you will
That is a very in hospitab!e way
of putting the invitation. But a
l do wish [ will accept it. al
though so reluctantly offered h
replied as they walked along to
gether.
We are going to have delight
ful times next week. Elean
said, roguishly.
'Ah! whom are you expecting
If l may ask the question:
| Harold and young friend fror
Virginia. He is described as yer.
, wealthy and strikingly hanc
some; watching him nervously.
f Both essential in finding a Wit
nowadays. But [ presume ri
outward character is sustained b.
, a corresponding refinement an
culture Jerold replied: not looE
ing at his companion.
She regarded him closely durln
t the recital, and fancied she d.
, tected a slight sarcasm in tn
! tone.
2 Yes, he certainly has, or Harol
> would not consider him such a
admirable companion. lie IS yer
fastidious in his selections
, friends. Of course you will cal
> You know Harold will expet
D you
7 Certainly he replied.
r But Eleane had detected q GU
, of the lip. and smiled to herse
as she thought:
t sAh! old fellow, l have 70
: now, and you wilt have to plea
=. your cause with a little mon
order. You think you have a +
val in the field now
[Conrinu6d IN our aaert.J
A lump Of bread about the slz
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

thinking of the past and the JOY
Gus life of her first school-days.
Then her mind wandered to
Harold's homecoming on the next
Friday, and she got to wondering
what kind Of q guest his friend
would be.
She fell asleep in sort Of con-
fased intermingling of ideas and
dreamed that Jerold was speaking
to her, begging her not to cross a
stream with the stranger. The
stream was deep and spanned by
a narrow bridge. The guest was
pleading with her to cross over
with him while Jerold insisted
she should not attempt it. But
Eleanc, in q willful mood, stepped
resolutely forward with the stran-
ger; and as she did so the bridge
gave a sudden lurch and they
we're precipitated into the water.
The revulsion Of feeling was so
grea. that she awoke' with a start,
and was glad to find it only a
dream.
But the dream had much an
noyed her, and during the two
or three days following she would
continually fancy she saw the ex-
preston of pain that had crossed
Jerold's brow as she stepped for
ward on the frail bridge.
Eleane wondered if Harold's
friend was as handsome as Jer-
old.
Harold had closed his last let
ter with these lines to Eleane: ..
L am coming on next Friday,
and you must look your prettiest
and do your utmost to please my
friend. He is handsome and
wealthy
Perhaps it would have been best
had Harold not added these lines
for they aroused the suspicion
in her mind that Harold was
bringing James Preston home
with him for the purpose of max
ing match
His last experiment in that
line had not failed Minnie was
engaged to a wealthy young plan
ter, who had been Harold's class
mate at College.
He had long known of the at
tachment existing between Jerold d
and Eleane, and it was in the
hopes of weakening their love
that be prevailed on his mother
to send her to boarding school
her vacations being spent with
an Uncle residing a short distance
from the College,
When Eleane had read the let
ter she threw it to Minnie, ex'
claiming:
And I won't do any thing o1
the kind! III be just as disagree
able and ugly as can. Harold
need not think I am piece ot
furniture to be put off on the
highest bidder
Now, Eleane, you are flying of
in one of your old moods. You
say you will look your ugliest
when 1 know you will do just the
reverse. You know you are good
looking, and I have never ye'
seen the woman who would Sigh
her charms; and you will moi
either. well, if [ do look we'll cal
l help it? But l shall not, ir
the least, exert myself to please
that young man. she said with
disdainful toss Of her head.
sPshaw! You will have Jerolc
in a perfect phrensy OF jealousy il
less than q week after his arrival.
To this sally Eleane made ~
reply, but with a.pout on her rosy
lips and a decided frown on he
brow, she left Minnie, who waf
Ching heartily at her.
She wandered to a favorite spot
in the oak grove, and seating her
self on the grassy sward gave her
self up to fancy's wandering scep
ter.
If only she could feel free ane
happy, as in the days gone by
when she and Jerold had studied
and played together in the ole
school house on the hill.
Why should she and Jerold los'
the old time trust and freedom
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09
NEWRERRY HOTEL
By
a, w. SIM MONS.

This elegant new Hotel is now open for the the
RECEPTION Of guests, and the proprietor VIII vii
soare no effort TO give satisfaction to the
travelling public. Good airy rooms, CON-
Portable beds, the best Of fare, attentlVe, ac,
conmodatiug servants, ,aud Ilodera' &c Gua.S
will ps the rule. JUNE ., "a H.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

Those who give not till they die,
show that they would not then If they
could keep it any longer.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

It don't take a very fast horse
to catch the epizootlc.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

Comets are wearing as long
trains this season as usual.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

The actor who cannot draw is
worse than q blister.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

What is the spot most dear to
cattle2 Their fodderland.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09
-
Doetrp.
%
TRYING.

Life, after all, is kindly affair:
Why is it stupid and not worth the living
Striving and getting wou't drive away care
Try giving.
Scowling and growing will make man
old;
Money and fame at the best are beguiling;
Don't be suspicious and selfish and cold
Try smiling.
Happiness stands like maid at your gate;
Why should you think you will find her
by rowing?
Never was greater mistake than to hate
Try loving.
The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1881-02-09

Said he: "Let US be one" And
she was won.
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29
Driving With the Parasol.

The other evening the Jester was
bathing his eyes in cold water, and sus-
pended the operation long enough to
remark:
eff a woman can't take her parasol
to Heaven when she dies, she won't be
happy there. She will come back after
it."
An impressive quiet followed this
dogmatic statement, and the ~parasols
OF the court knew some of them were
in for it.
1--WE were driving this afternoon
the aggrieved Jester resumed. land
the Princess kindly shaded my head
with her parasol. 1t vas very kind,
indeed. 1t limited my view Of the
country, at times, TO my knees and the
dash board Of the wagon. Whenever
We met a team, especially if the road
her parasol between myself and the
passing wagon, so that l turned out by
faith, or stood on my head to catch a
glimpse OF the colliding wheels. When
we started down a steep hill, she
dropped the parasol between me and
the horses, and | trusted to the good
sense of the animals to keep out of the
ditch. When we met any a%cquaint-
ances to whom [ wished to bow, she
knocked my hat into my eyes. When
she would point my admiring gaze to
some exquisitely tinted autumn leaves,
she jabbed Il projecting parasol rib into
my eye. When she turned to speak to
any n in the ear seat, she rasped
the back of my neck. OFT as the car
riage struck 4 stone Or lurched over a
rut, she proddedmy long suffering head
with vicious little jabS. l drew my
head down between my shoulders and
sat crouched and bent, but the remorse-
less parasol still pursued me. | have
been pelted and rasped and prodded,
and all from a mistaken sense of kind
ness. A woman's u~nselEshness and
kindness of heart always prompts her to
hold her parasol over the man who
drives. And if the nan who drives is
allowed to choose for himself, he will
choose sun-stroke in preference to the
parasol every time. | do not complain,
mind you. | merely make a simple
statement of plain fact Any man
who has had to drive a pair of horses
while some gentle-hearted woman held
a parasol over him knows what | have
suffered. And when she holds an UNI
brella, it is infinitely worse. Then the
man is utterly and hopelessly extin-
guished, and the material world is to
him only a wild. blank chaos of alpaca
and whalebone."
But here her little serene highness
closed the debate by deciding that the
nose caught it, but the eyes had it, and
without appealing from the decision of
the chair, the house ACCOMMODATIONS
dete, in Burlington Hawkeye.
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29

Mr.. Harrison A1nsworth, the novel
ist, who has just been entertained at a
banquet by his native city of Manchester,
is now seventy-six years old. Among
his paternal ancestors are Robert Aims.
worth, a distinguished scholar, and
Henry Ainsworth, the Brownist, who
was one of the most learned Hebrew
scholars of his time-the commence
ment of the seventeenth century. The
father Of MI. Ainsworth was Mr.. Thorn
as Ainsworth, who was a solicitor, hav-
ing an extensive practice in Manches-
ter. He wished that his son should be-
come a lawyer, but the young mans
tastes led him irresistibly in the direc-
ton of literature.
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29

1t is no vile drugged stuff, pretending to
be made of wonderful foreign roots, barks,
Gates of pretended miraculous cures, but a
simple, pure, effective medicine, made Of
we'll known valuable remedies, that fur
nishes its own certificates by its cures. We
refer to Hop Bitters, the purest and best Of
medicines. See another column Repub-
licdn,
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29

DIR. PIERCE's ssGolden Medical Discov.
cry - has become SO thoroughly established
in public favor hat were it not for the for
getfulness of people it would not be neces-
sary to Call attention to its power to cure con-
sumption, which is scrofu1a of the lungs, and
other blood diseases. as eruptions, blotches,
pimples, ulcers and silver Complaint
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29
What Physicians Saw.

SAN LEANDRo, Cal, Jan. 6, 1877.
DR.. R. V. PIERCE, Buffalo. N. Y.:-Dear
SRI have employed your pheasant Pur-
gatlve Pellets - in my practice for the last
four years. now use no other alternative
or cathartic medicines in all chronic de-
engagements of the stomach, liver and bow.
els. l know of nothing that equals them.
j. A. MILLER, NJ. d.
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29

THE Ottawa Kan. } Republican thus quotes:
Mr.. Harvey B. F. Keller, recorder of deeds,
says: l have long been convinced of the
merits of St. Jacobs Oil, and use it in my
family for rheumatism successfully.
St. Landry democrat., 1881-10-29

AN ex.Consul of Great Britain, says the
Brooklyn Eagle, related that Mr.. Charles
Townsend, Sedalia, Mo-, was cured of rheu-
matism of the worst kind by st. Jacobs Oil.
-1ndtduapo,is (Ind.) Sentinel.