davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08
REMARKABLE CURE OF pro.
FAMILY.

Prof. David Swing tells in his
paper of n remarkable cure of pro-
family. 1t was performed by q
bride on her newly welded hus,
band. She invited her elegant
bridesmaids, four in number, to q
quiet dinner. AS they knew of the
profane habits Of the groom, and
also knew of his good qualities
that he was man worth saving
they entered gladly into the pro-
posed comedy. The plan was that
nil these beautiful ladies' should
nse profane words at the table, as
the hot coffee, hot weather, or slow
servants might afford opportunity.
1t was bold plan, but it is said to
have cured the wicked husband: !:
for when his elegant wife remarked
to one of the young ladies that the
tea was ''hot as HI" and that the
biscuits were "too id sour for
any use," the husband absolutely
cried with remorse that he had
ever himself used such an out
rageous form of speech. While
such cure cannot be justified. be-
cause it might kill the ladies with
ont curing the masculine offender,
yet the story itself might serve to
show that man, as an animal that
swears, is mournful curiosity.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

A Maryland schoolmaster told q
refractory girl that unless she wrote
composition he would punish her.
She appeared at school with two
big brothers. The pedngogue laid
a revolver on his desk, and called
for the essay. 1t took her about
ten minutes to indite the following
sentiment: There is various
kinds of big brothers. Sum would
stand up for a sister under any cir
cumstances. and there are some
hly-livered, slab-sided mongrels,
who are cross between a Gibraltar
jackass and a Maltese Jew, who sit
around like rat-hole, while red
headed, closs-eyed slab of unre--
spected poverty wandsrs u borrow
ed pop, and makes their poor sis
ter paw around for materials for .
composition"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08


This is the way young lady Sab
bath school teacher in q New Eng.
land town exhorted her class oi
boys: "Now, children, if you'll be
good children, read your Bible, say
your prayers, SO to church, and
never say naughty wordsworth 90
to heaven, and that will be perfectly
splendid. But if you are not good
children. if you don't read your
Bible aud say your prayers and 90
to church, and ifyou do say naughty
words you'll go to hell, and that will
be perfectly ridiculous"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

Mamma. where do, COWS get
their milk ?" asked Willie, looking
up from tue foaming pau of milk,
which he had been ihtentiy regard
ing. Where do YOU get your
tears?' was the answer. After IL
thoughtful silence, he broke out:
DO the cows have to be spanked?'
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

Fred Hart is the edito: of fAe
Virginia Enterprise. Something
happened in his family recently.
and this is the way the Carson Ap-
peal refers to it: '"The Eateyprise..
for some days past, has contained
IN announcement headed: "A Girl
Wanted and yesterday Fred Hart's
wife presented him with . boy.
This shows just about how much
influence the Enseprise has a. .
family newspaper"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08
NO BUSINESS OUT THERE.
detroit Free Press.

Somewhere between Leadville
and Gunnison City wanders De.
troiter, who is penniless, ragged
hungry and discouraged. -Four
weeks ago he met a Michigan man
out there and sent his love to all
ihqniring friends at home, and also
explained why he was in that hard
up condition. He was too honest
and too particular for that country.
He reached Gunnison City without
a dollar in his pocket, but with lots
of ambition in his soul, and soon
/ met man who explained:
II can giveSyou the softest kind
of snap al four dosaaeess- day. I
want you to run one OF my faro
tables"
But I don't know the game"
"You don't say, stranger? You
must have had queer bringing up.
Ont here, and don't know faro?
Pass on! No time to bother with
you"
The second man applied to for a
situation squinted his eyes and took
long look at the Detroiter, and
quietly asked:
"Whar from
Detroit" said the young man.
"No use. That's too far East.
My patd ran off with the company
funds last night. and I calkerlated
on payin' somebody about a hun
dred dollars to overtake him and
bring me back his skulp. You'd
look sweet takin' his trail, you
would! You'd better inquire on
TIE HeAG corner.
Tue next corner was the site OF
saloon about to be opeLed. The
proprietor was q six-footer with
revolver on each hip, and in re-
sponse to the inquiry he said:
II s'pose you know how to pour
whisky and weigh dust?"
YES"
Suppose that one of the tough
ones comes in after his nip and re-
fuses to hand over?"
''I'll call the police"
"Police be hanged. Every mans
his own policeman out here. You
must open on him with a shooter,
and keep pulling the trigger until
he falls. The sits open at So a day
and found"
IL guess I won't take it."
'Then git. No place for milk
sops around here. Might a-knowed
you hadn't any narve by lookin' at
ye."
The Detroiter made one more
effort. This time it was O man who |
explained:
Glad to see you-set down a
bit. Ye see, there's bad blood be-
tween me an a fellow called Sandy |
Tom. We've agreed to drop each
other on sight, and we mean bust
ness. I want to get the bulge on
him, and bein' you're a stranger you
can help me. Put this D,rringer in
your pocket and go and shoot Sandy
Tom and I've got 5000 for ye."
"Why. that would be murder"
What of it? Do you expect to
hang ont around here over a day
without doin' any shootin'? Whar
was ye raised?"
I'm Detroit"
"Git! You haven't any spinal
column! You'd better run home
to your ma. you had! Out We go
SO long"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

A California Judge, in a moment
Of anger, said that the lawyers in a
case ON trial before him were no
better than horse thieves. Then he
npologizai and fined himself ten
dollars for contempt OF court
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

A Georgia young man asked his
sweetheart if she had ever read
Romeo and Juliet" She replied
that she had read Romeo, but she
didn't think she had ever read
Juliet.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08
EDITORIAL AMENITIES.

The unsophisticated readers o
those influential journals (says tn,
San Francisco POST doubtles.
imagine that the editor of The Peta
lama Peavine and The FanGo zen
geance are bitter and ferotious foes
It is quite possible that neither O.
Il ese gentlemen would speak te
the other in their respective towns
for untold wealth; it would spoil
the effect OF the terrible personal
denunciations indulged in through
| out each issue Of their respective
patent outsides. But away iToom iTToom
the glare of the rustic eye the case
is quite changed. The warriors OF
the flowing pen met in San Fran
cisco last week and took lunch to-
gether-something of almost week
lv occurrence, we understand.
Happening to occupy the next box
to the twain in the restaurant, we
naturally overheard some of their
conversation.
How is it, my dear old boy,
that you called me a 'putrid pirate
of perdi,ion' only twice in your
paper yesterday?' said The PeaUine
man, reproachfully. "It was hard
ly the square thing, when I desig-
mated YOU as % scalawag Of the
neither slums' four times on We'd
nesday."
1T was entirely through the
stupidity Of my assistant, dear old
friend. I wrote, with my own
hand, a half column leader, headed
The crawling reptile squirms
again. but high rate circus ad.
came in and crowded it out" re-
Piled The Vengeance proprietor.
THAT was tough luck" replied
The Peacine director, saving away
on his chop. Il felt it ali the more.
as on that very day I announced
that you serve5!. two terms at Sing
Sing for burglary, and there was no
doubt Of your having deserted
three wives in Texas"
Just like your kind thoughtful
ness, returned the other moltler OF
public opinion, as he ordered more
coffee. Il was also exceedingly
gratified and touched by your arti-
Gle of Sunday last, to the effect that
[ committed forgery at nineteen,
and that my mother was a colored
woman"
"Oh, don't mention it, old fell
low; besides, didn't you say, day
before Yesterday, that I cheated
blind widow out of her last cent,
and was ridden on rail in New
York for infanticide?"
There was moment of retro
spective silence, during which both
cronies were too full of emotion to
speak.
Finally the Vallejo man said: II
didn't mean to tell you, old man,
in fact, I attended it as q pleasant
surprise for you-but the truth is,
I am working ur a superb item
connecting you with the Nathan
murder, with absolute proofs, and
affidavit of confession said to
have been made by you when sick
in the penitentiary for arson"
Heaven bless you. dear boy! II
don't know how | could get ri
without you these dull times. + u
ever, tomorrow Ill comple't
beautiful little thing I've
working up, provins You to be 81
younger Bender, and appealing 2
tue vigilance committee TO /; u
out. I'll send you proof shee
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

When asked what complaint O.
Buster died Of, tb- +epiy wa
There was no comp. int every
body is satisfied"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

Hard words, like ,hailstones in
summer, beat down aud destroy
what they would nourish, If melted
into drops
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1881-01-08

Civil District Coult, (ate Third District
Court Parish of Orleans, State of
Louisiana-No. 1920.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
Jamestown has never in the course

jamestown has never in the course
of its existence occupied more
favorable attitude before the
world than it does at the present
time. To-day it is universally re-
garded as the most enterprising lit
tie city on the Northern Pacific
road, possessed Of advantages, both
commercially and socially, not ex.
celled by any place of it's age and
size in the great territory of Dako-
ia. It has the ability to become a
city of great Importance. A great
country Of inexhaustible wealth
surrounds it on every side, which
is being rapidly taken possession Of
by an enterprising class of people
whose watchword is onward. -
One to realize what jamestown will
be in the course of few short
years has only to cast a backward
glance at it's rapid advancement
during the past two or three years.
during which time it has advanced
from mere way station to city OF
yearly one tn "sand inhahitants.
Two years ago it was almost impo.-
sibe for Jamestown to keep a
small five column patent inside week.
ly newspaper alive, and its half
starved publis hers were actually com.
PEELED to resort t" crackers and
cheese, or starve. To-day James
town supports two large weekly
newspapers, which would be credit
to any city of ten thousand inhabi-
tants, and five column daily publish
ed all at home, with the latest tele
graphic dispatches. The advance
ment has by no means been confined
to the newspapers Of the county,
bu tevery branch of business has,wit
astonishing rapidity, advanced pro
portionately. The merchant and
mechanic alike, joined by an army Of
spirited husbandmen, have becn
the first to advance the interests
Of Jamestown.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
WAKE UP.

jamestown is the only town on
the Northern Pacific that has not
made an effort for representation at
the coming Minneapolis fair Bis.
marck, Mandan, Tower City, and
in fact, every place of any prcten,
sion whatever, has already taken
e&ectual steps toward securing a
foothold at the great exhibition.
They realize, to an extent, the i'm.
portance Of being represented and
the fatal results that are almost
certain to follow if, they are not
represented. Here is Stutsman
county. blessed with the best crops
on the Northern Pacific, yet there
is not enough enterprise within its
wealthy borders to make an effort to
show to the outside world what the
county is capable of producing in
the way of crops. It would
seem that the business men, as we'll
as the farmers, are disposed to hide
their light under a bushel, and
gradually lapse into a state Of
hopeless obscurity, which means a
wreck of every enterprise, as we'll
as every hore. If the citizens of
this community flatter themselves
that jamestown will steadily pro-
gress, and continue to boom with
out united effort on their part,
they will wake up one of these fine
mornings, only to realize that they
have been laboring under one of
the most painful delusions that ever
bedimmed the eyes of a community.
If jamestown ever amounts
to anything as a central figure in
the commercial or political circles
of this great Northwest it must
| work to obtain it. The Alert has
labored hard and long for the de.
velopment and prosperity Of this
country and has repeatedly warned
it's people against the evils that are
! sure to spring from a state of mae.
tivity. It has day by day faithfully
chronicled every step it has taken
in the way Of advancement, and
with feelings Of true pride has cited
it's hundreds of readers in the east
to the inexhaustable virtues Of her
soil. If there is a county in this
broad land of the Dakotas that is
under eternal obligations to the
the great God of Nature, it is Stuts-
man county. If there is county
in Dakota which possesses the nee.
essary qualifications for becoming
rich and powerful, it is this same
Stutsman county. There are two
distinct paths. One leads to wealth
and prosperity; the other to mis-
erable ending Of all our hopes for
future success and prosperity.
Which path shall we take!
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
THE TELEGRAPH NUISANCE.

The telegraph system OF the North.
west Is the greatest nuisance OF the
present age and it is time that the
business men took hold of the mat
ter and by united action demand and
secure better service, or, as they
can easily do, build and operate a
line Of their own. 1t is the excep
tion when = message reaches its des.
tination within a reasonable length
Of time, the rule being that the mails
are much quicker and infinitely m"rc
reliable. Instances are brought to
the notice of the Alert almost every
day Of; delays in the transmission Of
messages that indicate the grossest
carelessness or criminal neglect Of
the obligations assumed by tele-
graph company when they assume to
do the business Of the public. The
Alert does not doubt that the resi-
dent managers and operators ot the
company that controls all the Dakota
system, are doing all in their power
with the utterly inadequate facilities
at their command, but this fact in no
wav relieves the company Of respon-
sihiIity. The company have under
'aken to relieve themselves of pecu-
mary responsibility by refusing un.
der certain circumstances to receive
for transmission messages except
"subject to delays" This condition
the company has no moral right to
enforce, because they have asked
and received from the people yalna-
bIe franchises and rights, in return
for which the people have the right
to demand prompt and efficient SER
vice, without conditions or reserva.
tions Of any kind. The day before
his recent visit here thu Governor
telegraphed from Fargo, asking re-.
ply, receiving nono. he t-legraphed
again on the following morning, and
about 10 o'clock both messages were
delivered in one envelope, having
been sent 1T intervals Of nearly or
quite 16 hours. Fargo is distant o.
miles, weather was pleasant aud
wires working well. A scheme has
brcn suggested for securing an inde-
pendent business mems line from
Bismarck to St. Paul, with possibly
| feeders in other directions. This
can he operated cheaply by employ
ing operators at the smaller points
who shall receive employment and
partial pay in stores, warehouses and
other branches Of business. This
plan has been successfully adopted
in part Of the country and the Alerl
would like to hear from the press
and business men of Northern Da-
kata who have been sufferers from
the present monopoly
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12

Duluth Tribune.
Whatever deficiency NAV exist in
the other crops of this country this
season, the crop of young criminals
is unusually large. From all quar-
ters of the republic we have stories
of crime and outrage by children
whose ages are from twelve to four
teen years. Almost every crime in
the calendar short Of murder is set
down to their credit. One is ac-
cused of misplacing railway
switch, so as to upset train; for
gerry stands written against the
names of four or five, and highway
robbery and larceny against those of
at least score of urchins. We
shall not attempt to find theory
to fit this condition of youthful de-
pravity. It may be the result of
the dime novel literature and of
the trashy story papers that are
printed in such vast numbers for
the youthful intellect. All we de-
sire to do is to call attention to it.,
and to suggest that il we wish to
save the expense of doubling the
capacity Of our jails and peniten.
tiary, the alarming increase of
crime among those to whom crime
should be unknown must be stopped
in some way.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
Dakota Dashes.

There are over 400 postoffices in
Dakota.
Fat cattle are already shipped from
the Black Hills
A new Episcopal church will be
built at Yankt ton soon.
Carbonate has been discovered five
miles from Deadwoud.
The Normal school has been 10.
Gated hy law at Springfield.
A consolidation Of Davidson and
Hanson counties is talked Of.
Uaitcd States Marshal Raymond
will harvest 40, coo bushels Of wheat.
Uncle Sam will soon commence
the erection Of twenty houses for the
indians Mt Flandrau.
Parker is to have gri.t mill cost
ing $4,000. 1t will have five run of
stone and one run Of rollers.
1t is thought that the Sioux City
& Pacific will reach within q days
staging Of Deadwood before snow
flies.
| The furniture Of the Merchants
hotel at Yankton has all been sold
and the house will be furnished with
new.
A lady in Sioux Falls woke up and
found some one had shingled her
hair, first putting her under the in.
flutnce Of chlorofom.
The issue Of the daily Paragraph
has been postponed until a new tele
graph line is built between St. Paul
and Worthington.
The commissioners Of Sphinx
county, in session last week, re-
solved not to grant license to sell
any Intoxicating liquors in that
county.
Plans and specifications for the
new penitentiary at Sioux Falls
have been completed, and the di.
rectors are now ready to receive
bids for the work.
A prisoner named Cousins con.
fined in the Deadwood Jail, made a
desperate dash for liberty the other
day, but a few revolver shots scat.
tered about his heels soon brought
him to a halt.
| In the county Of Lawrence, over
800 per month has been allowed to
paupers. What blessing to a coun.
try editor to be county pauper in
that locality. The Deadwnod Time,
seems to think that the commission.
ers of the poor are too liberal.
The inimitable Charley Collins,
who has just returned from Ireland
where he has been in the interests OF
immigration, is going to tart an ev,
ening daily paper in Sioux City soon.
!. to be called the Times. The materi
al is OIL the ground.
Mitchell was started three year.
ago, now the inhabitants number
l,OCO. The land office for territor,
70 miles wide is located there. Thir
ty land lawyers are doing well. 4
; new hotel costi,. g $1l 200 is being
built. The railroad company ow'
the town site of $50 acres. aud vii
only sell to actual settlers
A German and wife named Buck
steter, living a mile and hal
south of Howard, Miner county
went away from home, leavin,
their children, a girl of twelve and
son three years of age, alone
, The youngest child fell into an opel
| well and was drowned and tn
heroic girl fshed him out hersel
and remained with the body unit
assistance came.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
Dakota's Game Laws.

We publish the following abbre-
Walton of the game laws of Dakota
foI the benefit of those who are no4
familiar with them:
Section 2. That it shall be un-
lawful tor any person or persons to
kill, trap or ensnare in any manner,
or by any device whatsoever, any
quail, prairie chicken, grouse, snipe,
plover or cajaw between the first
day of January and the fifteenth
day Of August of each and every
year.
Section 4. Any person or per :
sons who shall violate second Sec
ton or any person who shall have
in his or their possession or custody,
with intent to sell, dispose Of or
transport any of the above named
birds, except for use in this terrific
ry, shall be deemed guilty of mis-
demeanor and upon conviction
thereof be fined two dollars for each
bird,
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12

The New Orleans Times says
that city is the most misgoverned,
the most hoodlumized, the most be.
knaved and bebummered of all
cities. The great city lies, like q
huge, fat carcass, stretching In The
July sun, and the buzzards tear and
devour, and croak. and claw, each
buzzard greedy to get all be can
from the next buzzard.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
Yours truly,
MINNESOTA LINsEED OIL Co.

Governor Ordway aud his secre-
tary returned from an extended
tour of Northern Dakota July 80.
The Governor has been absent from
Yankton some three weeks, during
which time he has visited Fargo,
Jamestown, Grand Forks, Penn mbina,
Grand Rapids and various other
places in Northern Dakota.
While absent he visited LaMoure,
Walsh and Niandan counties for the
purpose Of better informing himself
as to his duty in the organization
Of those counties, they having ap-
piled for county organizations in
accordance with the statute, and it
being his duty to appoint county
commissioners to serve until said
officers can be elected at the next
general eleetion. The appointments
have been made, and are as fol-
lows:
LaMoure county commissioners
John r. Crum, Walter A. Holcomb,
Homer T. Elliott.
Walsh county commissioners
Geo: P. Harvey, VIM. Code, B. c.
Askelson.
Mandan county commissioners
Geo. M. shingle, Henry Mundy,
VIM. P. Tyler.
These counties are being settled
very rapidly, and, in fact, the Gov.
ernor represents that there is 9
most encouraging boom of immi.
grafton, railroad building and gen,
eral development in all the coun-
| ties visited by him.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12

Duluth Tribune: The dining room girls
Of the Dakota House, Jamesto rn, struck
last week because the proprietor would
not allow then, to receive their beaux in
the dining room. Nine of them marched
out in the morning and paraded the
streets, but made no violent demonstm-
tions Now, IT they had been of the
stcrncr sex they would have broken cv-
cry pane of glass in the house, but they
weren't and they didn't. They are de-
termined, however, that no one shall in
terfere with their divine right of being
Rugged.
Jamestown alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1878-1882, 1881-08-12
At His Old Trade.
Bismarck Tribune Aug. 10th.

Bismarck Tribune Aug. 10th.
Mr. f. H. BLY, returned last evening
from St Paul, where he has been for the
past ten days purchasing machinery and
supplies for the grading OF the North Pa
ciffc branch from JamestowR, recently
awarded to Walker aud BLY,. Mr.. BLY, is
an old railroader, having prepared many
miles Of the Northern Pacific for the ties
and iron. The contrac: which Mr.. BLY, i.
now interes ed in calls for fifty miles. OF
completed road this fall. The exact di-
rcction is not yet known, but the survey
nrs, working under sealed instructions.
are now several miles up the James River
Valley toward Fort Totten. The branch
leaves the main line directly at James
town following up the valley. James,
town will be the end of the new freight
division to be made pext week,