Daily Republican., 1881-09-16
His WIFE'S VACATION.

"Not much to do, did you say, my
dear 2" remarked Mrs. Mimpb!eur,
pausing before her liege lord, and
gazing at him Indignantly.
"Yes," growled the gentleman Its
a mystery to me what women have to
grumble about; especially you, my
love, with small house and only four
children to attend to. Whereas, we
men have an intolerabe burden resting
upon our shoulders, and when we return
weary and perpleXed to our homes, ex-
pecting to lind rest and quiet, We are
greeted with the old, old story 50
much to do--tired TO dealh-chiltrtn 50
troublesome'-a thousand other
complaints
Mrs. Mirnpbleuf turned away to hide
the two peariy tears which rose to her
large blue eyes and rolled slowly down
the fair round cheeks, and made no re-
ply while her husband lighted his
cigar and walked leisurely ap to his
| office.
He was somewhat aStonished at noon
by his wite's Announcing her intention
OF leaving the house in his care and ac-
! Cepiiug an invi allon to spend few
weeks with her cousin in the country.
"Hou need a little rest, Jeremiah, and
while am gone you can close your OIL
flee and stay at home and have nice,
easy time, with only few household
duties to attend to- declared Beil!na
kindly.
Mr.. jeremiah Elijah Mimpbicuf
scowled.
.'Do you mean to say that ! am to de-
vote my whCle attention IL household
matters Why, madam, can easily
do what little tlereis to be done, and see
to my business, a.so.
but the chll4rcn,' suggested lis
wife.
"Yom will take them with You, Of
course, "ne replied lnuillcreHI.y.
"Dh no. could not he bothered
with them" answered Beli!nn, stltily,
Mr.. MlmpbIeut looked somewhat
blank at her declaration, but noticing
the leas, ,.rccpuDle twinkle III her eyes,
he FASTENED 10 say,
"Nery well. ieave them at home; ~ur
children are nothln. 10 look after, and
| small manage beautifully,
"Now," I'll ueht our hero, the mora
ing of hls wite's depar' ure, "l'n begin
by Strengthening up the uln!ng room,
and washing tiie DISHES.
Two plates, one saucer and the china
tea urn were broken III clearing of l. lie
table but he wa. not u!scuur1 ged, aud
couura,liat Il himself tLat it was no
worse. The tire had gone ou6 III the
kitchen stove, 50 that ht Was obliged -
nsr cold water for "ishin. the dishes
which only hardened the grease without
removing it, and he was III Il quhndary;
for Jeremiah was Il very ihSilulous
p-rson, and aDhorrr,i i plate that was
not pertcCrly c,ean. 80 he ruJheu and
rubbed, but with no success; and to
make matters more serious, ne found
himself completely drehched with
greasy water. His handsone dressing
gown rninel, and las new cnbro deroi
slippers wet and SOllcu.
He built Il rnuslng tire at noon, and
mt the meat directly over il to bTUil;
then ne ru,umageu around tor h&i an
hour to find Il cook booh, and after
ACCOMPLISHING this feat, .lnSiui.y an
nouuccd his slnteutlon OF ha\lne biscuits
for dinner lie accordingly GOT all the
tinware out upon the table, and >uc-
ceeded in dlrtSlns some lia.i dcHch
pans, three cups and SIX or elght
spoons When they were at last made,
he referred once more 10 the cook book.
at saws, bake in II quick oven,
unused Mr.. Mimphieu'. Il wonder II
ours is Il 'unirk Ov"l"' guess il is
for Belina always has tir>t-c'a5S bis
cults, so here they 20, and he showed
in the paH.
A hame suddenly burst out a
around the gridirou, and removing II
he found that alter getting well SMOKED
it had burnt to il crisp on the side lIcNt
the tire.
Now, il there was on" thing more
than another that jeremiah was par.
ticular about il was hi, steaks being
rare, and he remembered a certain nc.
casion when he ha'i iisen from The tatie
in disgust, and left the house in rage
because the meat was cooked lit lc
too muCh-twO Of the children being
il. and his wife without Il servant.
Still, that was no excuse in tne auSttrt
eyes OF Jeremiah Mimrhltui' and he
showed his great diSpleasure by SLAM
ming be front door tOrGibIy after him.
and ab,enting himself from home ior
three days. Yet here was the sam"
thing happened to himself, and what
should he do.
He went INTO the iining-roOm to set
the table, and returned just III time to
smell the biscuits burning. Hurrying
to the stove, he found tll"m until to eat,
burnt to Il cinlcr. lie was i'll despair;
three O'Clock and no dinner, breakfast
at six on account of his w.te'> depart
ure, and himself and family on the
verge Of starvation.
His dressing gown wa, in dtp'"ra-
bic state, between the grease aHu
thick coat, ( Of flour on the t.hpWs, |
but he WAS too desperate TO care Tor APP
pearances, ard determined t. bay up IA
supply of bread aud cakes at the bak.
erv. He, therefore, locked the children
all up III his study and started, running /,
all the way.
In the meantime Sammie, aged sew
en-, amused himself by manufacturing
u kite out of valuable manuscript
which lay in the desk, while BOlivy
tore beautiful steel engraving ont OF
one of his fathers choice volumes to
ornansnt the face Of said kite, and
Jennie, u pretty, brown.eyed sprite OF
three summers, in reaching mp for
bottle of mucilage, knocked Oft the ink.
stani, which broke, leaving great
black stain on the handsome blue and
drab carpet The chair on which she
stood slipped, and, in Fastening to get
down, she dropped the bottle OF paste,
which fell into little shattered heap
at her feet, making an additional STAN
on I,apa's carpet,
Mr Mimpbeuf had always reproved
ais wife for calling the children mis-
chievollS tor he never saw anything at
al wrong in their conduct, aud con-
gratulared hi,uselt that he had the best
behaved and ncsl interesting tami y in
Lhe country.
Relurnin he inn ediately buried to
he stuly, and was horriti' d beyond ex-
-, FL, v,.pa a n h ur,.at .1 hi m |