davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1881-08-13
PLEASANTRIES.

.foNEs calls his wife's hair r-drcsser her
switch-tender
MATCHLEss story III when
there are no weddings.
THERE is a chap who calls his best girl
Revenge, because "rrvcnge is sweet.
PLUMP girls are SAID To- he gong out
OF fashion. If this is true, the plumrcr
the girl the simmer her chances.
My Darlings Shoes" is the name ~
new ballad, but "the old mans boot
IS generally considered more touching.
1iU Na- once eiri IA pu.uth
Vii" lad aversion g. truth.
so when her beau kissed her
Aud made her hp. b!irter,
She told folks .he had a tooth.
GENTLEMEN who are continually IN
Weighing against fashion worship should
remember that it makes q heap Of differ
ence whose dress is gored.
WHrN hen sits on an empty china
egg, ynu call 1t blind instinct. What do
Won call it when girl sets her affections
OH an empty headed noodle?
\ CHIvAIROrS exchange thinks when
man marrics II widow ie should CIV"
up smoking. "Shc gives up her weeds
he should be equally polite.
The Boston Dojig Adrfti>,,. heads
an article III its columns, "Thc Greece
If To-day" Ii this is intended for
conundrum We would -Olcomar-
Garinc.
"SHE WIS daisy" but she put her
little Frencll-hcclcd shoe on "A banana
peel. and in flash was transformed into
a lady slipper. and then mose blu,hing
like peonv.
A. ambitious sirl IA Dhbulus
Icll in l",e with a dear foreign Duke:
When she learned tina, his cash
Wa- ali carried singing hasn
She kicked like Bashi-Bszouk
"Do YoU play the piano. "No, I
don't play the piano, but my sister Han
nah, who is i'll Savannah, she plays the
piano i'll the most charming mannah.
Havcalanana
A YOUNG lady was carcsSing pretty
| spaniel and murmuring, I" do love a
nice dog" "Ah :" sighed dandy,
standing near. IL would / were dog"
"Nevcr mind. rctortcd the Young lady,
sharply, "you'll grow
The Boston Gtpbc remarks that love
is an affection of the stomach. In tho
interest Of amatory poetry. We really
hope not. Just imagine a lover warh-
ling beneath tine lattice OF her he loves,
my stomach. my stomach is breaking
for the love Of Alice Gray
MY wife," remarked a prominent
manufacturer, "ncvcr attends auctions.
She went once, Just before We were mar
p; ried and, seeing a friend on the opposite
side, nodded politely, whercupon the
auctionser knocked down "A patent
cradle, and asked her where she wanted
it delivered.
is IT true that you are going Ia mar
" again." ITS very true" "And
whom Il" you marry ," MY dead
wil.'s sister, "Is She handsome =,
"No." Rich ?" "Not at all. " "Thcn
why have you chosen herr" "To tell
you the truth. dear friend, in or,er not
3
Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1881-08-13
Your Excellency may command my
time and presence. With high consid-
Grafton, etc, GREENE MCDONALD.
Rather apitatel than snrnrisad seemed


Grafton, etc, CREME MCDONALD.
Rather agitated than surprised seemed
Mile. Folie when, the next day, as she
arranged ber brushes upon the shell Of
her easel. her handsome neighbor COM
menced, ia the most fluent Italian he
conld command, to invite her to his
wedding. Very much surprised was
Mcdonald when she interrupted him i'll
English. and begged him to use his na-
tive tongue, as madame, her attendant.
would not then understand him. He went
ondclightelly i'll his own honest language.
and explained to her his imaginative adj
miration, though he felt compunctious,
somewhat, that so unreal a sentiment
should bring the visible blood to her
check. She thanked him-drew the
cloth from the upper part of her own
picture and showed him an admirable
portrait Of his handsome features, sub
stituted for the masculine head of ,Ju-
dith, in the original from which she
copied-and promised to be at his we'd
ding. and to listen sharply for her muir
INJURED naIne in his vow at the altar. He
,hanced to wear at the moment a ring
If red cornelisn. and he agreed with hAr
that she should stand where he could
see her, and at the moment of his putting
the marriage ring upon his brides fin
ger that she should put on this, as to-
ken of having received his spiritual vows
/ Of devotion.
The day came, and the splendid equi-
page of the Countess dashed into the
square of the Santa Maria, with a veiled
bride and a cold bridegroom. and depos-
tied them at the steps of the church. As
they We're followed by other coroneted
eqnipages, and gayly-dressed people
dismounted from each-the mother and
sisters of the bridegroom, gayly dressed,
among them, but looking pale with in
certitule and dread
The veiled bride was small. hut she
moved gracefully up the aisle, and met
her future husband at the altar, with a
low courtesy, and lie sign to the
priest to proceed with the ceremony.
Mcdonald was colorless, but firm, and,
indeed, showed but little interest, ex-
cept by All anxiOus look now and then
among the crowd of spectators at the
sides of the altar. He pronounced his
VOWS with a Ateady voice, but. when the
ring WAS to be put on, he looked around
for an instant, and then suddenly, and
to the great scandal of all present,
clasped his bride with passionate ejacu-
lation to his bosom. The cornelian
ring was on her finger-and the Count
ess Nyschriem and Mademoiselle Folie
his bride and his fancy queen-were
one!
This curious event happened in Flor
ence some years since-as all people
then there will remember-and it was
prophesicd of the Countess that she
WouIu nave pul shoI' iease oi heI
handsome and gay husband. But time
does not say so. A more constant hus-
band than Mcdonald to his plain and
titled wife, and one more continuously
in love, does not travel and buy pictures
and patronize artists-though few, ex-
cept yourself. dear reader, know the
philosophy of it.
Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1881-08-13


A custom which is unique among the
schools of the country has been oh-
served, with the best results, for twenty
five years at the Chaunccy Hall School
of Boston. II is described as follows bv
the AdrtrfisCr:
at is u vote by the boys and girls Of
the school for the best boy in school.
No conditions are imposed, save as they
are implied in the explanation which ia
given TO acquaint the young people will
the purpose of those who established
the practice.
each pupil is free to vote Tor any OF
the school who has been member for
any length Of time, except since Dee. |
last. 1t has been the custom to select Il
boy from the oldest class, but it Is not
compulsory to do So.
Former members of the school, not
all of the same class, but intimate
friends there, believing that prize
given on the principles they proporInd
w"uld help in developing Il mauly spirit
at the school, began the practice of CIV
ing Il medal TO the boy who receives the
plurality Of the votes of the school rs the
best boy
At noon the scholars were gathered
in the school-room, and, after other hrlsi-
hess Gncluding All explanation of the
medal system Of the school. based on
absolute, not relative, merit. 50 that a
medal Is within the reach of every pupil !,
Mr.. Ladd explained the intent of the
gentlemen who give the st-boy med
al This does not mean, said lIe. the
best classical scholar, nor the most noted
catcher or pitcher at baseball. nor the.
ablest mathematician, nor the best
drilled soldier, nor the most elegant de
claimer, nor the fastest runner. nor tli',
most accurate Shakspearian scholar. nor
the lduckiest fellow at football.
"'Yon, young boys, will do well to
to what your father and mother want
Won to be-wlIat Won mean to lie YOUR
selves when You are in the first class :
and you, Young girls, will do well to
vote for the boy who comes nearest Ia
being what your parents are trying to
have your brothers become.
"'The older scholars are tolcrably
familiar with ancient and modern histo-
nv. Vote for that one of your number
whose character comes nearest to the
noblest man of whom you have read.
"All the school sat upright with mil
itary precision. Their officers passed
the ballots, and each pupil prepared
his own.
"At the head he puts his own name,
and the number of years he had been
in the school below, the name of his
choice for the prize. Each ballot counts
as many units as the scholar casting it
has been years at the school.
'After the votes were cast, the school
was marshalled from the room in regular
order, and the result will not be known
till the next exhibition.
"By long experience it is fonnd that
the pupils select a boy who is deemed by
the teachers to be worthy of the medal
thus proving that the sense Of honor i,
tine same with boys as with grown peo-
pie"
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19
Our Young Folks.
SLEEPELANl
ito Sleepy-lsnd?

How far Il it to Sleepy-land? "
Five miles, think, BY Banbury Cross,
You laugh go much at the ringing bells,
And you look Sd long at the old iady's horse.
Gayly she goes. with bells on her toes,
And yours to the music are keeping time,
TIL I almost wish that Mother Goose
Had never, never, invented rhyme.
IT'S long, long way to Sleepy-land,
For you meet Mother Hubbard and stop to
Ask whether she found her dog hone,
And what baker and butcher and barber are
at!
And the little pig that to market went.
And tho one that had not crumb to eat
Till tell them over and over again.
On the rosy toes OF your restless feet.
It's very long way to Sleepy-land;
I'm sOrey afraid we shall never get there:
There no straight road and no express train,
And yet am all the time paying fare;
But your voice grows dreamy, your hand
drops down,
You wink your eyes hard to keep then
Like the little old woman with her pig,
We reach Sleepy.land "thst very same
-Ansanda II. Douglas. IN Our Litle Ones.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19
A Petition to the Gear.

The following telegram was sent from
Sofia to the Emperor of Russia one day
after the arrest of the Liberal leaders:
"Your Majesty: Graciously forgive
us for addressing you by telegram. The
gravity of the moment cOmpels US to do
80. The time is short; the knife is at
our threats. If you do not withhold it
we are lost. Do not allow them to de-
prive US of the liberty conferred on u
by your august parent, the Car Eman-
cipator. We are already half slaves.
Yesterday the four best patriots OF our
country we're deprived of their liberty
in an illegal manner. You fought per-
sonally for us. Could you bear to see
us again slavesp Our best men have
been libeled. We refute this libel.
Your Majesty, these words are our own.
Nobody is telling US what to say-ws
are prompted by our own hearts. Be-
lieve us, our minds are not obscured.
For five hundred years we were slaves.
Your august parent wrested our liberty
for us BY force of arms. The liberty
that he conferred upon US we will prize
as our lives. We beseech you to com
mand that our patriots be liberated.
Give but one order-that your subjects
should not aid in trampling on our ma
tional rights given us by your august
parent. Without the aid OF your SUD-
iects no one will make US slaves. Our
priceless national privilege-free cleo.
tion-is being trampled under foot
The election Of representatives who will
renounce liberty can not be In accord
ance with the sincere wishes of the peo-
ple.'
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19
FoRsIax GOSSIP.

The two Processes Of Hesse, the
daughters of the late Princess Alice of
England, and granddaughter of Queen
Victoria, are fair, fresh, comely-looking
girls, not pretty, but womanly and
pleasant-lOoking. -a-ees- .-r,
The apartments of the Princess
Juriewska, in St. Petersburg, are hung
with black cloth, and she is said to dine
off black porcelain. The Princess drives
daily to the fortress of Peter-Paul to
pray at the tomb of the late Emperor.
The wife of Henry Irving, the ia
NOUS English actor, has brought action
against him for divorce. They have for
years lived apart, Mrs. Irving having no
sympathy with his art and no respectfor
his profession. They have two children,
both boys.
Under the ruins of the imperial pal
ace at st. Cloud was found a bag con-
tanning ten thousand francs in Napo-
Icons. The gold pieces were fresh from
the mint, and the bag bore the address,
'sFor his Majesty the Emperor Napoleon
Ill" Doubtless the sum was destined
for the poor at st. Cloud.
Count Tynare of the German En-
bassy in London, who committed some
offense for which, but for the Ambassa-
doris pleading the immunity of q diplo:
matte functionary from arrest, he would
have been criminally prosecuted. has
been dismissed the army and deprived
of his title of nobility. iss
The reports of the marriage Of Lord
Colin Campbell, son of the Duke of Ar.
gyll, and the daughter of the American
adventures, Victoria Woodruff, are
wholly erroneous. The lady whom Lord
Campbell married is daughter of Mr..
Edward Blood, q gentleman of large
wealth and high standing in English so
ciety.
Saws q London paper: There is
always q marked struggle for empire
between the fair and the dark beauties
of the gay world, and now, under the
distinguished leadership of Mile. Bern
hardt, fragile forms, thin to attenuation
are proposing to do battle against the
plump and rounded proportions which
have hitherto found favor before the or
binary tribunal of public opinion.
The art exhibition which is to ht
held in Vienna in 1882, in the Kunstler
haus, will last from the LIST of April til
the 3Oth of September. The exhibition
will include works of architecture, sculp
ture, medals, paintings, drawing, arts o
reproduction, etchings, etc. A iarg'
number of medals will be competed for
and both foreign and native artists ma!
strive for these.
Lord Beaconsfeld's will has jus
been proved, and the net amount dis
posed of, after deducting debts and fune
raj expenses, is shown to be $316, 1862
All the late lords real estate goes to hi
nephew, Coningsby Ralph Disraeli: ant
is to be entailed for the benefit of tn
latter's male descendants. The rest o
the personal estate is to be used in pur
chasing more land, to be settled in
similar manner.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19
A Successful Woman Farmer.

Just before dusk, Wednesday evening.
a brown-faced and pleasant-looking
woman, with a short, well-built figure
and firm step, fastened plump, con-
tented looking bay horse in front OF the
Boston Tea Store, and tossed q mo-
lasses jug out of her wagon. She wore
a widows veil and shawl. "There,"
said gentleman, sis one OF the most
wonderful women in the country, Mrs.
Osgood, of Minot Center, the woman
farmer.'' So, when Mrs. Osgood came
out of the store, with her strong arms
full of molasses-jug, salt-box, and this
and-that, the journal scribe began to
ply his interrogations. :" How much
hay will you cut this year?'' "Twelve
or fifteen tons. I've cut about six tons
already. 1 commenced moving at seven
O'Clock this morning, and moved most
of the forenoon. I spread thirty-five
common stacks of hay, and after dinner
I got in four good one-horse loads IN
season to get down here at four o'clock
and market lot of berries."' do you
cut your hay with q machine or a
scythep'' "Both; can NOV either
way. 1 have a one-horse mower. "Do
YOU have any help?" "Only what !!
ret from the children. There's girl OF
fourteen years and q boy of eleven years
who HELM me little.'' I" Is the girl go
ING to make farmer?'' 81 don't know.
I want to make farmer of her. but she
saws she don't like the idea very well. J"
+" How much of farm have you?" 81
have now about forty acres. l have
planted this year half an acre OF onions,
two acres of potatoes, and three-fourths
of an acre of beans, and sowed half an
acre of oats. 1 have done all the work
myself. have run the farm five years,
and l haven't paid out q cent-not one
cent-for help, and I amt going to,
either with much emphasiO. Last
winter I went down in the woods and
cut and teamed out ten cords OF cord
word.'' "Does your farm pay weii?'
"Yes; it's beginning to pay pretty well
now. 1t was all run down when came
there and commenced work. 1t only
cut hay enough for a cow and a horse
Now it cuts twelve tons. See the differ.
encep I have dug out the rocks and
leyeled off the fields with my own hands,
so I shau't be thrown out when ride
INV mowing-machine. 1 keep two COWS,
a horse, and lot of sheep, and there
are q lot of hens running around.
Mrs. Osgood then started Doboin FOL
home. Here is a woman who finds time
between planting her acres of potatoe:
and onions, moving dozen tons o.
hay, chopping ten cords of wood il
snow knee-deep, and all the hard worf
of running 3 forty-acre farm, to taxi
care of the milk of two cows, make but
ter and bread, and do all the kneading
cooking and sewing on buttons for
family Of children, and yet has nothing
to say about woman's wrongs or won
ans rights.-Levtston (Me.) journal.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19
Take Care Of the Straw.

In the older sections of the country
the value of straw is SO far appreciated
that the torch is now seldom applied to
he straw. stack, as was once the case.
and yet it is doubtful If any great pro-
portion of our farmers will fully realize
the actual worth of good straw. 10
know that it is too valuable to burn, and
that it should be applied in some shape
10 the land. is not enough to know. 1t
has far more value than this as food for
stock, and when this is fully appreciat-
ed, the haphazard way of preserving it;
which is adopted by so many farmers,
will be reformed. If there are means
so readily at hand to save the consump-
ton of 50 valuable production as hay.
10 refuse to utilize them is certainly not
the part of wisdom; and that straw will
not only sometimes meet and satisfy a
necessity, but is reiished by stock even
when hay is plenty, makes it plain that
straw in proper condition is valuable as
An occasional substitute for hay. Itcan
he fed with mixed feed, alone or with
hav. after having been steamed, and
will, be eaten with relish and profit BY
stock The expense of q steamer, how
Z ever. NAV be an obstacle with some, but,
while we think this a very desirable way
Of feeding straw. we are glad to say thai
steamer is not indispensable. Hgood
clean, bright straw is placed in the stocs
yards, it will be observed often that cat
tie and sheep will leave good hay to ca
it, either because the system is in neef
of something of that character. or tina
they desire a change. At all events
they eat it, and not only eat it, bu
do well on it. This is especial.
true of sheep. If good straw is place.
in the rack sheep will eat it readily
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19

carefully picking it over flr the gran
remainin9, in it, and showing very
great liking for parts of the straw. Sheeo
can be wintered on good wheat straw. il
the grain has been harvested early
enough and properly, without any hay
whatever. We would not recommend
ANYTHING of this kind, but we simply re-
fer to the fact, which has been fully es-
tablished by experience. to show that
there is real nutriment in what used to
be considered totally barren of nutritive
qualities. 1t would be valuable, how
ever, if it had nothing else to recon-
mend it than its value as bedding. and
would in some degree take the place of
food by preserving the animal heat and
adding to the comfort of the animal {;
and beside this, such q use would place
it where it would most readily be rotted
and converted into valuable manure.
This becomes secondary in Importance.
however. after its actual value as food
has been established.
The proper way to look at this matter
is to consider that it is on hand, and IT 1t
has any virtue, that the cost of utilizing
it is inconsiderable. If it cost anything
to procure straw, it would be legitimate
to compare its merits with timothy or
clover, but it does not. There is the
straw stack, and if it is worthless, it
might as well be burned as not; but not
80 If it is only comparatively worthless.
Comparative signifies that it has some
thing of value, more or less, and what
ever it has is so much absO.lte gain. IL
stack of it would keep sheep for q
longer or shorter time, and it costs moth
ing to feed it to the sheep, it wit thus
he the means of saving SO much hay,
and to burn it is simply throwing away
so much money. If cattle and sheep
will eat it q portion of the time instead OF
eating hay, and do well upon it, the cost
of getting it into the yard is certainly
we'll repaid.
Take care of the straw, therefore, and
by this is meant to preserve it as care.
fully as you do your hay. Stock will
not eat straw that has been exposed to
the weather until it is black, any sooner
than it will eat hav that has been expos.
ed until it is spoiled. The straw needs
to be kept bright and sweet, and if kept
in stack special attention must be given
to this matter. If there is room in the
barn for it, and there often is on small
farms, it had better be kept there aftei
threshing. To save trouble. it would
be well in all cases in which it can be
done, to stack the grain near the stock.
ward, that at threshing the straw will
be there without additional carting.
In this connection it is proper to no
tice the worth of chaff, and the usua
carelessness of preserving it. Improved
machinery makes the loss from thi:
source less than it formerly was. but still
the loss is considerable under the mos
favorable circumstances, and in mos
cases the straw-carrier is not at hand
Suffice it to say that the chaff is yer!
valuable, and that stock delight to picl
it over and are profited by it.. A littl
attention to the prevention of these littl
wastes will aggregate considerable o
profit in few years.-Western Rural.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-08-19
The, notion thai, the Car is

The notion that the Car is i'm
INJURED in dismal fortresses is erroneous.
CATCHING, where he lately passed sever
al weeks, is an important station on the
railway from Warsaw to St. Petersburg.
and the castle close by, one of the finest
of the imperial palaces of Russia. 1t
was built IN 177O by Prince Orloff,
under the direction Of Rinaldi, the
architect. Later, CATCHING Castle came
into the possession Of the Grand Duke
Paul, whose favoriteS residence it re-
manned until his accession TO the
throne. The interior il g0rgeously
fitted up, and the park laid out with
consummate taste. ornamental waters,
supplied by the lake of CATCHING,
abound, and decorative structures
lighthouses, bridges, keepers lodges.
temples, artificial ruins. porticos and
temples-are scattered all through the
grounds. A large portion of the sur
rounding forest is fenced of as q pre-
serve for bears. which are protected
there as much as foxes or pheasants in
England; ard years a4o the l1te En-
peror often visited Gatchina Castle with
large retinua of royal. and princely
guests 70 indulge in bear-huntang.
FL y F.