Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1881-07-20

| uulc 10, tudI uOu hlCh 81 HlSu'
He was right! l could realize the
difference in the dark. He kicks or
level with his braios; a mule kicks on q
level with mine.
As l came around by the front door
Mrs. Blodgers cautiously motioned fol
me 10 approach. could hear Blodger:
IN the kitchen scraping on the old fiddle
and kee ping accompaniment with bis
foot, l recognized the air, 1t was Grand.
fathers Clock, and l knew from the
way he was coming down with his foot
that he was on the home-stretch of q
two-mile heat. Said she in care-wOrn
voice
Mr.. Sloper, he will not buy any.
thing; but tyou could only come around
with some klnd OF a door-mat, that
would catch him and bang him over tn e
head and make him clean his boots I'd
buy one ter him.
Just then the fiddle stopped, aud,
hurrying away, 1 replied:
Il catch the idea. Good bye.'
On the train 1 studied the matter all
over, and worked out a plan to be re-
yeuged on old Blodgers, and also to
help his wife civilze him. IstOpped
at Mcnlo Park, and was soon greeting
an old bosom friend.
Said : Edison, old boy, what's the
latest? p
He replied Why, my dear Sioper,
I am now at work on tho iththyosan-
thyrone,'
What in the de uce is that =
well, you know, Sloper, that words
can never die all the human voices
that eyer existed are still floating
around. 1 can set this iththosanthyrone
in the Garden of Eden, and reproduce
that little :onvers alton between Eve
and her first visitor, in the sweet, soft
tones of that voice which thrilled Adam
with bis first love. can set it on the
plains where Abraham's tents were
spread, and all along down the ages
Of the world, where the voices of the
great and the gosd have Aoated away ;
l can gather them up, and
%, never mind the rest, Edison. We
must drop this iththyorhlnocerous, and
YOU must help me get up patent, self
acting, double back-actien doOr.mat.'
WE'LL we cot 1t up. 'Patent Door
Mat and Quid Box combined, with
telephone attachment and one day
when Blodgers, with half dozen farm
hands, was out 10 the muddy field re =
pairing fences, Mrs. Blodgers and l got
1t firmly attached to the kitchen door
way, and fastened ell the other doors
so BlOdgers would be compelled to en-
/ ter the house by that doc
The Dime: hour came and Bledgers
was on tlme-he always is.
'Mariar, what sort Of a trap is this p
exclaimed Blodgers, as he started in
astonishment at the patent attachment
'Yon can read for yourself. Mr.. Rlods
ers, quietly replied his wife.
/ And so he could. There 1t was il
large lettsss over the door: Patent
Door Nat and Quid Box, with notice
undet it warning him to wipe his boots.
and drop his quid oftobasco 10 the box
before attempting to enter and Mrs.
Bledgers had even picked up a huge
old quid from her carpet and put it il
the box, as a kind of nest-egg, to encoul
age him 10 lay another one by it
side. r
Bledgers rebellod al once and show
ed fight. Encouraged by the tarm-hand.
not to submit to any such woman'i
tyranny, he sailed into the door-ma
with a kick /; but he kicked below th'
level of his brains that time, and founC
himself caught by apair of iron claws,
that held him like wise, while an au'
tomato arm reached out through The
fanligh. and smashed his old fiddle oyel
bis head.
Blodgers gave yell as The pieces fel
around HIM, and, by desperate effort,
pulled himself away from the claws.
His dander was raised, and he buckled
in next time with the AK. Edison and
| I had prepared specially for this kind o
an attack; We had some lightning ready
! for him. not the dangerous, forked kint
!. that would have laid him out-tunera
expenses are too high for that; but the
| doer.mat was charged With some O
| Edison's harmless sheet lightning, tia
one can fold up and carry in his yes
pocket. 1t splui.ered just enough ts
scare him at first, and, as he started L
run, 1t shot out and singed all the hai
of his head so clean, that microscopic
discrimination would have revealed more
! bristles on an Irish potato. ~
Blodgers was dishsartencd, but still not
defeated. He feared to attempt force
!. again, but resorted to strategy. Placing
llhe ladder against The house, be attem
-