Lexington weekly intelligencer. (Lexington, Mo.) 1871-1887, 1881-10-15
our AGENTS.
The receipts Of the following persons win be
spooPEHDYKEs PICTURE HANGING.
A..LI
From the Broollsn Eagle.l

From the Brooklyn Eagle.I
.sWelI, my DEAR ssid4Mr. Sp6op-
epdyke, with q nail In his mouth, and
balancing himselfawayeringly on .
diptngsroom chair,1HteaH you've got to
do noWisto get ,yours9picture ready,
andi'M show o. o sl how TO hang the
-ss.itss .wfull sweet Of yen, pet said
Mrs. saSpoopendyke, alternately rub
bling Che frame a very hectic chrome
and sucking the thumb she had been
hammering for the last twenty mln-
-laIt's awful sweet and thoughtful
of you, dear, TO offer your assistance
atssuch . time, forI do believe ! never
. xon|sfs ss,s got e an nail I'd driven i" in that
sOfcourse yon wouldn't, my dearl''
laughed. Mr.. SpoopeHdyke. "Who
ever saw e woman thas could drive q
naiIfieY You couldn't drive q galvaniz.
ed carpet-tack in d ,ieven poulid .blad-
der of putty And speaking of driv-
ing nails, I'd like to know if you're
RI0ks Eoihg Is La6d up that hxmtner,
Or ineat pounder, Observation-Disclosures
been usiDga ThinkI can drive nails
with my elbow ?o Is IA
stft's thesstoyes handle. love-" said
Mrs. S~poopendyke, meeKly,a handing
linn q mysterious looking %lmpiement,
with q wooden handle at one end and
the under jaw of q shoemaker's
plyers at the other. 49, ~ 4
~..Ohl, it,s,aTstoye hook, ls it2'' said
Mr. Spoopendyke.I1rega the
weapon with a sinister expression.
"Now, ify6u'ds handed zmesup a dog
iron, or a pair of steelyards, I'd have
been right at home but q stove
hookI Really, my dear, I'd rather
undertake. to drive "a nail with a
scythe handle." sIs +. 'l's -
s.But the wallis so soft and lovely,
dear, it really drives them beautifully
-if they would only stick" said Mrs.
,fSpoopendyke, reassuringly.
"Only stickE" said Mr.. Spoopen,
dyke, contemporary; NOW, I'H bet
that you never wet the .mucitage OH
aassfngle nail before you: started.
That's whygthey didn's stick for YOU
Ouch Are you going to stand
%serenely by and see me beat my
knuckles. into a shapeless pup
with this dodgasted measly marliu-
spike 2" it5a.a4a= u s.i0tc541
'Poor dear !" said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, consslingly. "Yon do act SO
sialpatient-snd at the first trial, too.
Maybe it struck something hard zih
the plaster. Try another place-that's
the way managed that"
sob, ves," said Mr.. Spoopendykei;
ssthat's the way you managed it,!
and you have punched enough holes III
here to play cribbage in. Will you
gimme another nail2 Don't you see
efsve knocked this one flat, and can't
unpry. it up again ?"
"Cant lunpry 1t up again !" ejacu-
lated Mrs. Spoopendyke, .iu a very
gentle voice, handing him another
. nail. "Can't'a unpry 1T up again J"
/ Nell il that amt grammar |" 7f
y R"Oh, amt it," said Mr.. Spoopen-
.5dfkesWith q most horrible smile. '.Of
course il ain't, youeolds female semin-
zary with q cracked bell ia your
cupola! Am l going to school to you,
or am l driving naiIs3
Well ar,,1'esighedsMrs. Spoopen-
dyke. 'syou're surely o driving
nails"
fTtNp, you just5bet Pm otsdriving
naiis. aud you can bet Z amt a-going
TO try to drive no more nails neitherl
And you can bet," continued Mr..
'Spoopendyke, with; still intensifying
Intensity, and awar-dance flourish as
: he leaped to the floor, ''and you can
just BET. your high muck-a-muck, if
you'll set that measly old chrome of
yours on the .side-table, IIl throw
this dodgasted thing so far through il
that it won't get back in a centuryp'