Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1881-08-03
HunlbugS.

| Mr.. EDITOR A shreWd lawyer Is reported
as saying that humbugs would last as long as
| there were fools to be bitten, and there
would be fools as long as there were hum
bugs to bite them. This will be long time
but it appears to be true. AS the word
| humbug is commonly used, it means one
who sells brass jewelry for gold, sawdust
for meal, corn-husks for feathers and other
| things too small to have a quarrel about and
| too mean to be endured without fight. But
the word has far wider meaning and ex-
| tends generally to impositions or hoaXes
| So say Webster and Worcester. and they are
good authority.
Humbugs are all curses to the human
family. and may be classed into different de-
partments. | want to notice few of them
of the more popular, and, therefore, the
most dangerous kinds.
. First, we have the literary humbug-the
man who comes around with book having
no merit in it, and SO worthless that it can
not be sold in the bookstores The author
and publishers are afraid to put it on the
market, so they ''sen by subscription only"
A few sample pages are exhibited and vast
amount of elocution expended over the
part that is not there. l bought the
Life of General Grant in this
way a few years ago, and when the
copy came, had read the whole of it III the
newspapers. l also bought the 9 Footprints
of Time" which was represented as being
q wonderful historical and literary produc-
ton, but when it came [ found it to be as
full of errors as pig-pen is of feas [ gave
| 81. 90 for it and traded it for small g Life
of Andrew Jackson" which only cost forty
cents in that trade. But how singular it is
that we continue to bite at such humbugs!
Men will buy these worthless hooks and
pay high prices for them when they cannot
| be induced to invest such works as Rollins
Ancient History, Natural History, Shakes
peare, Josephus or other productions of
value which are always sold cheap.
A few years ago, some agents passed
! through the country selling a domestic medi-
| cal book. l believe it sold for $500 or
| $500 copy and it went Like snow in Aug
ust. Many who would declare that they
were too poor to take a good newspaper,
bought this book with eagerness The
paper would have brought them valuable
information every week on all subjects.
while this book is filled with description of
symptoms and medicines, some of which
may be useful, but mainly cannot be under
stood and likely to deceive the poor sui
fers who ought to go to physician and re-
ceive proper treatment after full and
complete diagnosis of his disease.
Another class of literary humbugs are
those who go around selling cheap chromos
at high price and throwing in some blood
and thunder newspaper, which will be read by
the young. Nothing more devilish could be
placed IN the hands Of young persons thar
this cursed class of papers. The devil
chuckles with laughter when he sees one OF
this class of humbugs start out on his tour
Another class is the political humbug, an.
other name of which is the demagogue
These know that they have no merits Of
their own, so they attempt to deceive the
people and hoist themselves into place anC
power on the dement's of others. If the
| government of heaven was transferred tC
the earth they would cry out against the OPP
preston of the people, and make LOUD
noise about the corruption of those in au
thority. They are always whining abou
rings and chques. They are the only class
of persons who know what the people
want. They never discuss a subject
on its merits or consider whether it i,
right or wrong-the only question
with them is, "Is il POPULAR" Wher
such get into authority the people
mourn as the Bible says they SHALL They
promise anything and everything to every
body that wants anything, and then give
nothing. They are like feather in the air
blown in every direction by every popular
breeze, and if they should strike anything
they will make no lasting impression The
world would be better off if no such beings
existed.
Again, there is the medical humbug-the
pretended doctor who knows nothing, and
don't care to know anything only how tc
deceive suffering humanity and stuff his
pockets. The writer was told of one of this
class who went into neighborhood, blew his
horn, declaring that he could cure all dis
eases to which flesh was heir-even con-
sumption in its last stages. A man lying on
the verge of the grave with this dread dis
ease dismissed his regular physician. whom
he knew to be man of great skill and
ability, but who told the patient his true
condition, and employed this horn-blower
The consequences, of course, were that the pa
tient died, while this medical humbug rode
off on the only horse left to the bereaved
widow and her houseful of children, as his
fee for playing the humbug on dying man.
Such physicians never stay long at
one place, because they would be found
out. | knew mamie has been dead
now number OF years-who played the
game of travelling physician for long