Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1881-05-18
CLEARFIELD, Pa. WEDNESDAY, MAY IS, 1881.


mine, Nothing could be fairer than
that, could there 2"
But still the jackson street man
hesitated 1t was barely possible that
cows did not have any front teeth on
their upper Jaws. He remembered
then, that cows in biting off grass al
ways threw their noses outward, while
horses nipped it off by jerking their
noses inward He was astonished al
how near he bad come to being vic
timized, but he did not like TO come
down. The two were then near the
meat market, near the corner OF Jack.
son ari Michigan streets, and the
jackson street man was sure that the
butcher would know for q certainty
whether or not cows had front teeth
on their upper jaws: so he pushed the
door open and said to the proprietor
"Linehan, have cows got front teeth
on their upper jaws"
Linehan was running skewer
through roast Of beef, but he stop.
ped, looking up in astonishment, he
said
"What p
"Havo cows got front teeth on their
upper jaws2"
"COwsP'
"Yes."
SCOT front teeth on their upper
jawsY"
"Yes."
upon my word | don't know"
"You don't know ?"
"No. You see | buy my beef by
the quarter at the slaughter.house, and
don't have anything to do with the
beads. But ] can find out for you
when | 60 over"
81 wish you would
So the jackson street man closed
tho door, and reioined his neighbor,
and the two walked along without
saying word. A milk wagon was
seen coming up the street, and it was
resolved to hail the driver and ask
him the question, as it is popularity
supposed that milkmen are more or
less familiar with cows. The Van
Buren street citizen cleared his throat
and yelled, "Hellow The milkman
reined up, and said
60 ahead with your tests, Ii you
find any water or chalk in that milk
III give you the whole Of it."
The citizen told him TO be calm, as
they had no intention OF testing his
milk, but only wanted to know if COWS
had front teeth on their upper jaws.
The milkman looked at them about
a minute and then whipped up his
horses and drove off, mentioning some
kind Of a fool that they were. Up on
Wisconsin street they saw another
milkman, delivering milk, and over
taking him they explained the dis
pute. He smiled pityingly upon their
Ignorance, and said
"Of course cows have front teeth on
their upper iaws-a driveling idiot
ought to know that much, A COW
would be handsome looking object
without any front teeth on her upper
jaw, wouldn't she ?"
"Ive concluded to take that bet'of
yours" said the Jackson street man TO
other. "Come, now, down with your
dust. Put up or shut up"
."Why didn't you do It, then, when
you had the chance2 Inover claimed
to know whether COW had any up.
per teeth on her front jaw or not |
only thought | had read so somewhere,
and asked to know if you knew about
it for certain. But now that the thing
is settled, there is nothing to bet on as
| can see"
"Oh, Of course not" said the Jackson
street man sarcastically; "of course
not
Just then Mr.. Clark, of the Newhall
House, happened along, and as the
mill1man picked up his lines and drove
off, the Van Buren street asked Mr.
Clark if he knew anything about cows,
Mr.. Clark said he did, having formerly
been a farmer and a cattle buyer.
"Well, said the Van Buren streeter,
"do you know | got the queerest idea
into my head this morning about cows
that a man ever had. Somehow or
other | got the idea that cows had no
front teeth on their upper jaw and |
actually offered to bet ten dollars with
this man that such WAS the case |
don't see what possessed me"
"Well, il you had bet, you would
have won the money" said Mr.. Clark,
"What" exclaimed both the citizens
together
T say if you had bet you would
have won the money, for cows have
no front teeth on their upper jaws
"Sweet spirit hear my prayer" said
the Van Buren, street citizen, as he
brought out his roll and peeled of the
two fives again and shook them at the
Jackson street man, who turned away
with a siclily smile and said he could
not always be pulling out his money.
Ignorance seems to be stalking
through the land like a Kansas grass.
hopper on stills Pecks Sun.