The Saline County journal. [volume] (Salina, Kan.) 1871-1893, 1881-03-24

/ bn SOonlA 6nO0As
The original lancers-Old time doc
tors.
Always raised in anger-the feline's
caudal appendage.
On the artIess heart the flirt prac-
tices her heartless art.
A match game-puIling lucifers for
the treats.
Carried away during q storm-an
umbrella.
Castles in the air are not real estate.
Necessity becomes pleasure when
it compels US TO act in accorance with
our desires.
The habitude IL the only one that
breads the Kansas drouth this season,
simply because it's to he entirely of n
spirituOus nature.
Soon after the kitchen maid the fire
there was presented a horrid and ker-
osene.
Type are easily influenced-thcy
mmay be set mp to say anything you
desire
The Free Press says it's hard to be
poor. Perhaps so; bat we have an
idea that il Is easier than getting rich.
From the sweat of his brow the hon
est laborer earns his daily bread, and
we're perfectly willing to earn ours
the same way-right from the same
brow, as il were
A painful occupation-thatO Of the
glazier.-E2erated RaI~ay Journal.
Putty probably don't look Mt it in that
light.
Has an editor any wri;es:- White
hall Times. No, or he don need any.
A good pair of scissors and a paste-pot
are all he requires.
Work is good medicine" is one Of
Dr. Collyer's apiculated aphorisms,
and who likes TO take the medicine
any way.
Queer. isn't it. that the party which
a paper supports should look to that
party to support it:
Why Is sewing machine like u
baby: Because il requires u tension.
TheOdore-Ies, Sara Bernhardt's
form is slim, but her acting is not
Earl Marble. Whiler sale-ry is simply
immense.
Life is like step-ladder. You get
nearly to the top, slip. when the whole
shuts up and you "tumble TO the
grave.-New Haren Register. We
never knew a man TO fall from step
ladder to the grave. We have known
the ladder TO shut up and the man to
tumble, but never into the grave. He
generally falls on the ground, alights |
on his head and shoulders, and the |
breath is entirely knocked out of him
but, not so much SO, however. but |
what he can struggle to sitting pos
tnre and think more bad things about
the ladder in five minutes than he
would be able TO articulate vocally i'm
fifteen days. But, as we said before,
we never knew of a mans falling from
q step-ladder To the grave.
During this cold weather much
can the ink-stand," is 4 pun which
originated i'm the fertile 81 brain OF
Joshua Short, and probably but few
puns have, using the Eieruted Rail
ray Journals expression, pen-rack-
Ell 4" equalcd To this. by way of addi-
tional :puns by contemporaneous par
,graphers, the following comprise a
few of the samples: But how long
,an the pen holder? ''-Buriington
"Tell us how long can the
pencil sharpener, and we'll answer
hat. ''-Omoha Republican. They
ire all right rs long as the weather re-
mains stationery. "-Onioha Bee.
Your puns are enveloped in obscur-
ty. That's no wafer to get off jokes"
-D,frOH Free Press. "Seal,ah. ~
Boston Gio5c. :" Does any one for a
suppose that such puns give
paperweight They should be ruled
nut and foolscap placed on the pun
tiers. -.Norrisfo,rn Hsruid. Let
no furthcr"-CHa.i Sat Night
The above gives us good ink-ling
If the matter Now lets blOtter all
'ut and start anew. '-.NyJ0c.se Sun
ioy Times. ITS slate now and they
'ught to he sealed up"-1srrc Hdufe
Sat Night "Great scissors! How
his pun has pen-racked."-Eyordted
Journal. stopper, boys,
topper, or there'll be an inkubus over
Is for life '-.d,friaD Mich Times