davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
All Quiet on the Wabash.

From a special which we published on
Monday. from Oaktown, it looked as if the
old saying of "h- on the Wabash" was
quite apropos once more. The whole story
however concerning the devastation made
by the overlooking river turns out TO have
been MunchauSen, as we judge by the fol-
lowing letter which We have just received ::
0AKTowY, Ind, February %, 1881.
SIR-In the Sentinel OF yesterday Is a communi-
cation from this place. Judging from its tenor
II would seem that we, as community, were in
Il depl0rabe condition. ! am ready TO contradict
every item in il. First. we had high water in
1850, about one year ago, and that Shaker Prairie
Is not submerged nor has IL been; no houses
swept away but little stock Of any kind suffered
no one died in log school house. and. left to the
mercy of the raging elements. and the people of
Shaker Prairie have not suffered the calamity
that he states they have The fact is Shaker Prairie
Is high, dry prairie, with the exception of
few bayous, and they are protected from the over
flow by good, substantial levees. There is no log
school house, or any kind OF school house i'm the
overlooked lands of the Wabash bottom. There
has no death occurred in the overflowed district,
as he states. His whole correspondence is fabri-
cation of his own getting up. and no excuse can
be offered for his want of truth.
This community has been victimized more than
once by said correspondent; so much so that for
bearance has ceased to be virtue such fabrica-
tons arc decidedly mean and do great injustice
to the people OF Shaker Prairie.
We would advise said correspondent 10 repair
to the deSolate and submerged school house in
the middle of the sea- secure a large cake OF
CONCEALED fluid as ID goes crushing and grinding
by, place II in the middle of said desolate log
school house, and carefully sit down on it.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
The Story of n Flag.

The Printers Register tells the true story
of Republican roorback which had an i'm
mense run during the late Presidential cam
paign
The tremendous effect which might result from
typographical error was never better illustrated
than in the case of the Hot Springs Telegraph
and its Rebel flag. A great Democratic barbecue
had been held near the Springs. the editor had
Thrown himself in a two-column descriptive
article, headed with flaming lines. To add little
glory, the compositor was directed TO top the
article with that oft-used emblem OF our
Nation. the ''stars and stripes" The editorial
was printed and sent out before the busy editor
had time to examine his handiwork, and
then, to his horror he found he had flung TO the
breeze the stars and bars!" The careless COM
pOstor, in tumbling over the dusty box of black
ened cuts, had taken this relic of the old war
times and used ii without a close examination
Then what an uproar arose, All the copies OF
this edition that could be secured were seized by
sent throughout the land. The Republican press
from Harper's Weekly and the New York Tribune
TO the most obscure papers in the remotest Terri
tories, rang with the cry OF treason" The flag
and its following headlines were reproduced by
TYPOGRAPHY and ster0gnphy, and met the eye
everywhere. The unfortunate editor protested
in vain: his voice could not be heard in the din.
But now that the campaign is over he shall have
justice
His name is W. A. Webster. and he is North
crn man. formerly an Iowa editor. He served
with honor i'm the Federal Army, risking his life
10 put down the emblem of treason. IL is as hate
full to his sight TO that of any stalwart' in the
land. He had lately bought the Telegraph office,
and did not even know that il contained this
obnoxious cut All who know him believe his
explanation. Ii was simply typographical error
nothing more.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

addressed as Judge" little Tommy shook
his head and said: "You amt no Judge.
Can't fool me-" "Why am no Judge7"
Sos yer hair amt parted enough" was the
guileless reply.-Galveston News.
Tommy returned from school the other
day in a state of great excitement. "What
do you think, papa2" said Tommy; "Joe
Stewart, one Of the big boys, had an argu-
ent'with the teacher about question in
grammar" "What position did Joe take7"
asked papa. ellis last position was across
chair with his face down"
A little girl was devoutly saying her
prayers before going to bed. when her
little brother crept up behind her and pulled
her hair. She interrupted her prayer, say
ing; "Will God please excuse me little
instant-just long enough to give my
brother slap" Taking assent for granted,
the slap was given and the prayer resumed
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
EXPRESSIONS
A kiss: The elixir of tulips.

$1,000
If you are troubled with sleeplessness
imagine you nave got to get up, and off you
go.
Whenever you hear man asking if life
is worth the living you can make up your
mind that he Endorsed bill and had TO pay
it.
Beauties of politics: If Heaven were run
on the American plan, there would straight
way be caucus to see who should be gate
keeper.
"Gath" says there is not a particle of
mOdestY about Conkling. Suppose "Gath"
should take an interpretive search for that
becoming quality.
Our true acquisitions lie only in our chart
ties. We gain only as we give. There is
no beggar so destitute as he who can afford
nothing whatever to his neighbor.
Women (remarks a late essayist) skate
much better than men. Or is it that their
superior gracefulness gives them an air of
superior ease? saw only one girl fall the
other day, and she managed it beautifully,
but several men came down most ignomin-
iously.
A Islander refuted: George Selwyn once
affirmed in company that no woman ever
wrote letter without a postscript. My
next letter shall refute you" said Lady G..
Selwyn soon after received letter from her
ladyship, where, after her signature, stood:
"P. S.-Who was right: you or p
A Church steeple, at Ionia, Mich, is
thought to be bewitched. 'One night it APP
peared to stretch up, and bore hole in the
clouds. At another time it seemed to wab-
BILE and lean over. and its last trick was to
appear to be on fire." We should like some
Ionia whiskey ourself. There must be heaps
of fun in It.
Intellect: ado you really believe that an
ass ever spoke to Balaam?" queried man
who prided himself on his intellect
Coleridge, to whom the question was put,
replied: my friend, have no doubt what
ever that the story is true. / have been
spoken to in the sane way myself" The
man of the inquiring mind retired for medi-
/ tation.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

his ear by an accident on the road philo-
sophically observed: II don't mind paying
up when ! reflect that, at the rate OF 81, 500
for such little ear yours was. the Com
pany would have been thrown into bank
ruptcy il il had been a Pennsylvania lcgis-
lator's ear."-Brooklyn Eagle.
A witty old American Judge, who had
spent an evening with young lawyer in
the country whose Office was on the second
story, on taking his departure stumbled on
the stairs and fell to the bottom. The young
lawyer, hearing the noise, rushed out. and
seeing the Judge lying on his back at the
bottom of the stairs, fastened down. and
with great anxiety, asked, as Your Honor
hurt?' NO." said the Judge, scrambling
to his feet, ''but my legs are"
The FAkir OF silva gave sli ght OF hand per-
Torrance in Galveston. One of his fcats
was TO make q marked dollar disappear in
the sight of the crowd, which he success
fully did. THAT marked dollar will be
found in the vest pocket of that colored gem
tleman, said the fakir, pointing with his
magic wand at Sam Johnsing. All eyes
were riveted on Sam, who advanced to the
front, took some money from his vest pocket
and said: Boss, heah is your change.
has had two beers and a segar outen dat dol
lar you told me TO keep in my vest pocket
till YOU called foah it,
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

1t is thought that there is a great deal
more acting off the stage than on it,
woman will direct a letter straight if
she has to draw line with hairpin.
The man who has his sisters and his
cousins can not be too careful of his haunts.
Winter is disagreeable bed-fellow, be-
cause it is too much inclined to indulge in
snowering.
We are sorry, but we are obliged to classify
painting a pretty girls cheeks as "traudu-
lent coloring of sugar" and call for polar
iscope test.
In the makeup of a small boy there is al
together too much whistle for the amount
of boy. 1t is most too much like using a
two-quart funnel i'm three-ounce vial.
Bridget, can not allow you to receive
your lover i'm the kitchen any lon
ger" 'It's very kind of you, maam; but
he is almost too bashf.:l to come into the
parlor."
All things are comparative. To a nervous
woman the problem OF how to get cater
pillar off her new bonnet is a matter of
greater moment than the passage of the
Rubicon was to Cesar.
A bald headed. cream faced, pale-eyed
Puritan, from Massachusetts,, came TO New
York on visit last week. and refused to
it was Cleopatras needle, and Cleopatra was
a bad woman.-Brooklyn Eagle.
ga collection Will now be taken up"
said the minister; Deacon Swipes. will
you pass and that good man waking
suddenly with his hands full of hymn
books responded: mo, I'll order it up, by
thunder" and then the minister dealt him
a dreadful look and the good man passed
out.
A Chicago youth was sitting ON the shore
of a skating pond utterly exhausted. a
solicitious friend asked the sufferer what
allied him. After pausing to get his breath
he thus explained: "Well, you see, Miss
Brown rested her foot on my knee to get
her skate fastened and haven't got over the
effects of it yet."-Brooklyn Eagle.
''How is your sister coming on in her new
placer" asked Galveston lady of her ser
want. "Matildy is comm on first-rate, but
de baby is mighty colil1y, and gibs her heaps
of trouble" why, / didn't know your sis
ter was married. Il didn't know 1t neither,
and Matildy herself says she didn't know it
yet, neither. No wonder we didn't know 1t. "
81 don't think majority of the members
of Church choirs ever get to Heaven" OBJ
served an old lady who was accustomed TO
construe her Bible very literally. This
opinion very naturally occasioned some sur
prise, and she was asked why she thought
so. Because" said she, 'all angels are re-
quired to sing, and that's something most
members of Church choirs can't do. "-Gai-
weston News.
The Treasurer of Vermont Railroad
Company in paying over Sl,5Oo the
amount adjudged victim for the loss Of
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
The story OF the spider-web.
m. W. Lowrie.l

To me, the web Of the spider is truly a
study, and ! learn many things from it.
First, j note the patience of the little
spider in spinning his delicate threads.
What model of tho virtue he isl He is
far from being pretty. but his work and
his virtue of patience are beautiful, sure
ly. Then | think Of the skill the fellow
has.
And another thing learn from ugly Mr..
Spider ia, that patience wins. l never saw
u spider land I've been acquainted with a
good many Of them, and like 10 watch the
morose-looking specimens) who didn't catch
something nice in his trap before he gave
up.
"Go TO the ant, thou sluggard," and "Go
to the spider, thou inpatient ought to go
hand in hand, rs proverbs.
And another thing. You may say
what you please. but geutleness tells. Who
ever saw a rough, burly spider2 Spi-
ders know that they can catch more flies
with soft, delicate meshes than in rough
ways.
A spider might spit at the flies and chase
them, and get all his family at work
shouting after them, and never catch fly
in the world. But he is gentle, and
seems &c know the old proverb, that you
can catch more Gies with sugar than with
vinegar.
But see the way he sits st the center
of his web-worlz, and feels out, "a it were,
all along the wires, 20 the very extrem-
ity of his meshes, that sparkle in the sun
shine.
Every thread Is like one Of its own nerves.
l think all this is like the human heart.
The threads are our affections. Touch our
feelings, and the heart at the center feels 1t
in moment.
Let us try and keep our feelings soft and
tender. Let conscience respond to the
slightest touch. We sit, as it were. in the
midst of a delicate network Of thought and
affection. Let us be tender Of the feelings of
each other. The heart feels the slightest
touch that is laid even on the most distant
part Of the vast and intricate network of
which it is the centre.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

time nudging him: 'Did you put tie
money in the tree, in the yardf" The pea.
seller, who was quick-witted. said: "Yes;"
though at the moment he didn't know what
his wife meant by such question. The
robber heard the question, and waiting until
he thought his victims asleep, went into the
yard and climbed the tree. Now there was
hornets nest, shaped like a round
box in the crutch of the tree, and the rob
Der soon found the nest. AS soon as he
shook it the hornets, disturbed Of their rest,
few out and attacked the robber with great
fury, inAicting a hundred painful stings.
The robber yelled in pain, and several peo-
pie came running to find out what was the
matter. The robber was given into the
hands Of officers and taken 10 prison.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
For the sunday Sentinel
TO wYOMING, IN Tux WEST.
KArnERrSE DrSyrse CLARK.

'ritten March Il. 1871. upon the passage OF I
mans Suffrage Bill In wyoming.l
Beautiful young sister,
Away in the golden light
Slow II the Eastern dawning.
We turn TO you from night.
Night Of glooms and errors.
Night OF an unjust sway.
See In your face the coming
OF woman's glorious dayl
Hangs the star Of sunset
Low over you in the West.
Hut a brighter jewel now
Il cleaning on your breast:
And starry the gems you hold
Firm In your young soft hand
Gems you will fling tomorrow
Broadcast over all the land!
Hail 10 thee. the youngest
OF our radiant sister train.
First 10 welcome the Princess
Back 10 her own again;
Breath OF spring Is on us,
Greener spring comes 10 thee,
Beautiful young Wyoming,
Away to'ard the Western Sea.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
cold Maids.'

We sometimes hear it SAID "that every
generation grows wiser and better" We
wish the evidence was so clear upon this
point that there could be no question as to
the truth of this adage. We have had all
the wisdom OF the past ages as foundation
whereupon to build our own, so we should
have failed to do justice to our own capa-
bilities, or to have duly honored our fathers
if We had not made progress in many things.
While we can glory somewhat, we have
reason to mourn and be ashamed that in re-
gard to things of moral nature we have
been so slow to learn. There are some
things we have inherited from the past that
bear evidence against US. If we could have
been wiser in our selections from the reposi-
tory of former times, and gathered to our
selves all the good, and dropped out of use
that which brings with it no grace to adorn
and nothing to enrich the mind or add to
material prosperity and scatter sunshine in
the pathway of life, we should be loaded
with less of that which irritates and brings
sorrow and pain, caused by the jostlings of
the different classes as the great mass moves
onward. Is it not possible that for the want
of that progress, SO much depended upon by
many among us to lift us into one universal
brotherhood" we are transmitting undi-
minished, things that have been so perni-
cious to our moral health and grow in
virtue and peace, whereby future genera
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

The writer of an elaborate treatise on the
the origin of evil has suffered at the hands
of the proOf-readers. He meant TO say.
''The soul of man is of Divine origin: the
body of man is of Satan" But the wicked
printers have made him to say that 1.-The
body OF man is of Satin" This, however.
is not worse than the case OF the line OF a
hymn which, by similar manipulation, or
a lack of carefulness, was changed from the
triumphant expression. I'VE raise our lofty
shouts" to the very infelicitous and un-
poetical one, I'VE raise our lofty shouts.
Thus does old Satan slyly interfere with
that which was meant for good
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

In recent number of Dingler's Polytech-
nisches Journal is described the alarum clock
of Herr Pfyffer, which at given hour lights
a small lamp. The lamp is above the clock.
Near it is disk with a sectoral piece cut out
and with horizontal axis. This has spiral
spring and, by means of a handle, is turned
round to tense position, in which it is held
by projecting nose and catch. When the
nose is released at the proper time, the disk
springs back and ignites match over the
lamp The arrangement is said to work with
great certainty.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
The Hermit of the Cleft.
Y MRS. ANNIE A. rEEsTos

A. high As the highest ms grand a. the grandeSt.
Is this lover OF nature who lives By the sea;
As pure as the purest, as sweet n the sweetest
As wise ns the wiseSt OF wizards Is he.
AS true ~ the truest, as brave as the brayest,
Tho he lives in cave, within reach oil the sea:
rs strong the strongest as calm as the calmest'
As rich as the richest OF rich men Is he.
For he knows every tone Of oceans great organ.
He knows every fish that swims in the sea;
Every change In it, aspect Is fraught witha mean
ing
Zach one OF her plants shells or corals knows he.
All night. when the storms rend the vast. heav-
ing bosom
OF the wonderful changing. mysterious sea,
lie keeps a bright light. to warn sailors OF danger.
And an night at his post with lifeboat stands he.
Many men has he saved from the terrible break
els.
Many loved ones he's caught from the grasp Of
the sea:
Yet refuses all praise or presents. or homage;
But tod giyeth grace 10 one humble as he.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

Five hundred dollars reward for better
remedy for Heart Disease than DIR. Graves
Heart Regulator Give it a trial. Physi-
clans recommend il.
Pamphlet on symptoms of Heart Disease
free. Address i. f. Ingalls,, Concord, \. III.
Price so cents and 81 per bottle. Sold by
Stewart 4 Barry, indianapolis.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
nnn,f Get the ChilIs.

If you are subject to ague you must be
sure to keep your liver, bowels and kidneys
in good, free condition. When so, you
will be safe from ali attacks. The remedy
10 use is Kidney-Wort. 1t is the best pre-
ventive of all malarial diseases ithat you
can take. See advertisement IN another
column
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
HUMOROUS.
a busy retail grocer,

Whom we all surely know, sir.
Was asked one day in a friendly way
BY country chap who had come To stay
TIL the mail came in at the close of day,
what are your gross receipts, SIR"
"He, he! Ia. ma. no. no! sir"
Laughed the busy retail grocer.
As he pointed out. with laugh and shout.
The barrels and boxes ranged about.
You can plainly see, beyond doubt,
What are my grocery seats, siri'
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
PIeasantries Concerning the Fair Sex.

Pleasantries Concerning the Fair Sex.
The fair sex are fond of coasting Some
fourteen embroidered carriers have been
found in our billy streets-proof positivel-
Yonkers Gazette.
Many bellies are now wearing as an orna-
ment little spider web, in which is en-
tangled the tiniest of flies. Fellows will. of
course, look out and not fly into mesh.
Since the announcement that lady's
voice was restored, after fifteen years of
silence, by the runaway of her horses, sew
eral prudent husbands have solo their teams
Striped stockings cost more than they
used to.-Norristown Herald. But they go
farther.-New Haven Register You mean
they come higher. don't your Well, that is
what we said.-Norristown Herald.
When you see young man sailing down
the street shortly after midnight with his
collar mashed down his neck you can make
up your mind that there's young girl
crawling up stairs not far distant with her
shoes under her arm and an extinguished
lamp in her hand.
man 81. Hafney by name, who is in the
interior of the State received letter from
his wife the other day. 1t read: "Dear
Husband, have been very anxious about
your personal safety ever since l read of
that cattle train being wrecked" A di-
vorce suit is spoken of.
A gray hair was espied among the raven
locks of charming young lady. "Oh, pray
pull 1t outp she exclaimed. 'If l pull il
out ten more will come to the funeral" re.
piled the one who made the unwelcome dis
coyery. "Pluck it out, nevertheless" said
the dark-haired damsel; ats no consequence
how many come TO the funeral provided
they all come in black"
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

.sThen stay al home, my heart, and rest.
The bird IA safest In its meet;
Ger all that hutter their wings and NJ
hawk u lowering In the sky"
-Longfellow.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02
THE HOME.

IL is not doubted that men have a home In that
piace where each one has established his hearth and
che sum Of hs possessions ard fortunes; whence he
will not depart II nothing calls him away whence II
he has departed ho seems 10 be wanderer and IL he
rsturns he ceases 10 STANDARDIZATION from Civil
Law.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

BE good dear child. and let who VIII be clever:
10 mobile things. not dream them all day long:
And 80 make life. death, and that vast forever
Oue grand sweet song.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1881-03-02

EEN. AhA hlh-n htNNNAHA"
NJ sweetest child. | have no song 10 give you.
No lark could pipe 10 skies 50 dull and gray
But ere we part. one lesson viii give yeu-
For every day.