Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1881-03-12
CONVERSATION.

! Fairly on the road, man came and sat
down in front of me. and turned around
! and faced me-:
Cold this mornin, he said.
l folded my paper and famed myself
with it vigorously a moment or two before
| replied. Then / unbottoned my coat
| tprivate to editors 1t was originally a
! three-buttoned coat; but the exigencies of
the season, the long absence from home,
and the necessity of dropping in the con.
tribution basket every time l go to church,
has reduced it to the minimum of one),
wiped my frigid brow with my handker-
chief, and said in painting tones
| g l don't find it so.
The man looked astonished. But pres
emily he said
Maybe you've been runnin' ?"
:" No." | replied, 81 have been asleep
for the past two hours in sleigh"
And We didn't feel cold 2" the man
inquired.
! " Man !" / said in tones of amazement,
"cold on the 9th of June?"
| 81 June {" he echoed, strengthening no ;
"are you crazy? It's the oh of January. .
Well, " | said, 1T felt like the 29sh of
June to me"
" It's mighty fine sleighin, all the same,
the man said.
| told him without blush that l had
never seen the mud worse on Ohio roads
since could remember.
"Where on earth, he asked in utter as
| constituent, did you come from 2"
" Day ton, | said
His eyes began to creep out and look at
each other over the top of his nose.
"When ?" he asked
"This morning" said calmly, "since
o'clock y
8" How ?" he fairly shouted
6 In one-horse sleigh, said.
"Sakes alive he shrieked, 90 it is i'm
| possible It's only ii o'clock now, and
Dayton is 55 miles away"
" Couldn't help it, insisted II left
there little over two hours ago in a
sleigh, had poor horse, drove slowly,
and the mud was up to the hubs of the
wheels all the way. 1t was as warm as
May, and | hadn't seen enough snow to
make one-b boy slide IN 5, 600 miles,
The mans hair stood on end, and he
got up to start off for the other end of
the car.
If you amt crazy, and / believe you
DC, HC odiuy Will pfdNt cdIAC6butsS,
"you are. an awful liar"
"Good man" l said, 81 expect l am,
but | am not fool, / may tell startling
lies, but | do not talk like an ass and
would be thought liar or maniac rather
than an imbecile. l do not come into a
car where the thermometer marks three
degrees below zero and tell living,
breathing, intelligent, sensitive man that
it is cold, just as though | was imparting
some information to him. do not watch
him drive up to the train in sleigh,
spinning over the dry, crisp snow, on the
smooth, perfect pixies of Ohio, and then
attempt to instruct, amuse, or startle him
by telling him the sleighing is good. l
would rather astonish man than bore
him. Ii have nothing better to tell him
than something he knows already far
better than l do, my mouth is sealed,
and l will never speak. In order to
astonish him or startle him | may have to
lie to him; but that is better than boring
him. You might as well sit down and tell
me that twice two is four as to tell me
that it is cold. You might as well tell
me that George Washington is dead as to
tell me the sleighing is good. Go away,
good man, go to sleep. | tell you it is
June; there is no snow, there is dust and
there are roses. 1t is 200 miles from
Dayton to Loveland, and l walked from
the north pole this morning Go, get thee
to nunnery, and when you can model
your conversation on something beside
the United States Signal Service reports
come and wake me up and hold me in the
matchless charms of your instructive talk.
know not what course Others may take,
but as for me, gaul blast the man who talks
to me about the weather"
And straightway the man ariz and got
him unto the after wood box, for he was
sore astonished. And as l fell into slum-
Der, the forgotten dreams of which con-
tanned more real, valuable information
than that man ever did or ever will know,
| heard him opening conversation with
the taciturn brakeman by remarking:
''Cold this mornin II Burdette