The post. [volume] (Middleburg, Snyder County, Pa.) 1864-1883, 1881-11-24
Spoopendyke.s Baby.
Ho,o that Gentleman Behaced on
the Occasion Of an Addition
to The Family.

|
the Occasion Of an Addition
to The Family.
"well, well, WE'LL" saii Mr..
Spoopendyke, with grin that in~
volved his whole head, and an effort
at tip.toe tread that shook the
whole house, "and 80 it's girl, my
dear
Mrs. Spoopendyke smiled family
and Mr.. Spoopendyke picked up his
heiress.
Its the image OF you sho sail,
regarding with some trepdatiou
Mr.. Spoopendyke's method of hand.
ling the infaut.
Il don't SOC how you make that
out said Mr.. Spoopendyke gravoly.
II don't know when my nose looked
like the thumb part OF boiled lob
stcr claw Do understand you
that my eyes bear any resemblance
to the head of a screw ~
Il mean the general features
murmured Mrs. Spoopeniyko.
"The general features seem to be
all mouth retorted Mr.. Spoopeu-
dyke, examining his acquisition.
"If onr general features arc at oil
alike, my visage must remind you
Of an earthquake. Hi ! kitchee
kitchee What makes her fold her
fold hor legs like that 7"
"She cant help it." reasoned Mrs.
Spoopendyke. They'll straighten
out in time"
"No time like tho present" quot-
ed Mr.. Spoopendyke, and he took
his daughters feet aud commenced
pulling her legs. ~ don't want any
bandy-legged first in this family
while I'm at the head of it"
Naturally the baby began to cry
aud Mr.. Spooponlyke essayod to
soothe it.
"Hi ! kitchee /. kitchee kitchoe
ee'oe ~ he chirruped. Great Scott,
what cavern! Any idea how much
this mouth weighs ? Iii kitchee
kitch-e-e You'll have to get that
mouth rooted in before COLI wealth
er. What's the matter with her,
anyway 2"
Perhaps You hurt her, Let mo
take her, please" pleaded helpless
Mrs. Spoopend yke.
"She is doing VOL enough. Iii (!
you ! lloli up! Hayen'C you any
thing to catch this mouth in ? It's
lspilling all over tho neighborhooi
Hi! ropsy. Geuovievc, Cleopatrn,
dry up I'm going to have trouble
breaking this young ones temper /
can see that. Hero bend the otL.
er way ouoo y and Mr. Spoopen,
dyke tried to straiSbten up his off
spring, wit hout avail.
Let hor come to me-, do, please" p"
moaned Mrs. Spoopendyke, and
Mr.. Spoopeudyke WAS forced to
hand her over.
"Well, that's quiet baby" said
he, nursing his knee and cycling the
infant. "What are those bumbs
over its eyes for ! What prepou-
derance of intelligence 4, they rop-
resent :"
You mustn't talk so,' remoustrat,
ed Mrs. Spoopenlyke," "Sho is the
handsomest child you ever saw"
well. she's got to stop biting
her nails before she goes any further
with this procession. Here, take
your hands out of your mouth, can't
you? Why don't you put her hands
down ?"
"Why, all babies do that" explains
cd Mrs. Spoopendyke. "You can't
stop that"
"Tm going to try said .Nr.
Spoopendyke, aud | don't want to
be interfered with 10 bringing this
child up. Here, you, Maud S.
Bonesetter, put your hands in your
pockets Don't let me see any more
nail-chewing, or you aud I'll get
mixed up in an argument. She gets
that from your flmiy, Mrs. Spoop.
endyke,"
"Say, dear, don't you want TO go
and order some things 7" asked Mrs
Spoopendyke.
mo-" reioined her husband, ~
want to see this youngster. Where's
her chin I Do babies always have
their upper jaw set right on
their shoulders /? Kitchee kitchee!
Har ooal,~ oo,nao claar 10 tha hr;J~a