Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-01-15
Levify IN the Pulpit

Probably there are no cities in the world
that have so many irst-class clowns in the
pulpit as New York and Brooklyn. For
pure. unadulterated comicslity, doubtless the
iast-named city is entitled to the iack-kniie.
r. De Witt Talmagc, who for some reason
or other wls unable 10 posture and howl
before his devout congregation last sunday,
cast about him for some one else 20 amuse
the members of his fold. He was remarka-
blv successful in his selection, who happen
ed to be one Rev. j. Hyatt Smith, Con-
gressman-elect. This person took Tor ms
text: "For one star ditlereth from another
star in glory and after the recital OF a
funny story invariably quoted these words
of Holy Writ. II remember" sald this
clerical Grimaldi, "that it is rclned Of
preacher who. in addressing a congregation
of sailors. took row-boat for topic. lie
said to them: Now, there Is your boat.
and one oar is pulled by Faith and another
bv Hope" Suddenly one oar breaks, and
the preacher asks, Now, what are We % 90
To prevent the boat going on the roc&s| 2 A
nautical person in the congregation, who
took in the situation. roarcd out: Scull,
YOU darn fool j." This coarse and stupid
story was received by Mr. Talmageis lambs
with loud laughter" Later on the reyer-
end gentleman. who parts his name in the
middle. made the following assertion, which
was also received with great merrinent:'
"Why. if heaven were paved with gold,
redeemed New York broker would make a
corner in gold before he was in there an
hour" Again the Rev. Smith says; some
men think themselves saints but with ali
charity must say that there are some self
made saints on earth whom | should not
care TO meet in heaven, and there are many
saints who expect to arrive IN heaven whom
7 don't desire 10 be on speaking terms with
for several centuries." This was also re-
ceiyed with boisterous applause. Rght-'
thinking people must grieye TO scesuch prot
anation Of the pulpit Men Ike Talmage
and Smith have missed their vocation IN
life. Their proper sphere is the saw-dust
arena. where they might come tumbling in
To the ring with a Hoop lal Here we are
arain. Mr. Mcrrvman ~ They would also
shine a. street fakirs crying from the top oi
a dry goods box, Here you are, gentlemen /.
Here. a pOcket-knife which would cost you
not less than half o dollar az any store;
cake Of shaving soap worth fifteen cents q
hottie Of Oriental balm 10 remove freckles
from the laccf the Nvi 4n-Ifiv WV. I'm. }.
puzzle. and a twenty-fye-cent handkerchief,
all of which you can have for the small sum
of one dimef' In Difference 70 the very re-
sDectable class Of persons who do not be-
i lieve in the Darwinian theory vulgarism in
the pulpit should cease. The Good Book
tells Us that there is time for everything,
but the ordained minister Of the Gospel
makes 4 sad mistake when he habitually
INDUCES in levity simply for the purpose Of
amusing his congregation. Such clerical
buToons seem to forget that in 50 doing they
are fostering and strengthening the skepti-
cal tendencies Of the age and making scofiing
inhdels instead Of God-fearing Christians
/ Baltimore Gazstts.