Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1881-03-20
THE BACHELOR RECLAIMED
You are determined not to marry"

And why2" Ez re-
''In the first place, never expect to be
aba to support wife according to my
ideas of comfort. In the second place. /
have no hope of meeting woman who
will sympathize sufficiently with my feel
ings and views to be congenial compan-
ion. Thirdly, l cannot bear the idea of
adopting as constant associates the rels-
tives of her l may love; and fourthly. I
consider housekeeping, and all the details
of domestic arrangements the greatest bore
in existence
This col oquy took place between two
young men, in the garden of one of the
fashionable hotels at Saratoga. 1t was a
sult7y afternoon, and they had retired un.
der the shade of an apple tree to digest
| their dinner, which process they were
| facilitating by occasio ally putting some
very mild, light brown Havana cigars,
The last remarks were uttered in very
calm and positive tone by Mcneil. q
| philosophical and quiet gentleman, who
had most sensible theory for every thing
in life. Among other things he took great
/ pleasure in the conviction that he thor
| oughly understood himself. The first time
| his interest was truly excited by a mem
| Der of the gentler sex he had acted in the
mos; extravagant manner, and barely es-
capped with honor from forming most in
judicious connection.
To guard against similar mishaps, he
had adopted a very ingenious plan. Being
uncOmmonly susceptible to female at
| fractions, he m de it q rule when charm ed
| by sweet face or thrilled by a winning
voice, to seek for some personal defect or
weakness of character in the fair creature,
| md ohcfip of.lry laCo
until they casta shade over the redeeming
traits and dissolved the spell he feared.
| When this course failed he had but one
| resource. With Falstaff, he thought dis
| erection the better part of valor. and dee
| liberately fed from the allurements that
| threatened his peace. Thus he managed
not to allow love to take permanent pol-
session, and after various false alarms and
exciting yigils, came to the conclusion
that no long siege or sudden attack would
ever subdue the citadel of his affections,
But Mr.. Mcneil had SO brsced himself
III spirit of resistance that he had made
no provision against the unconscious lures
| of beauty. He could chat for hours with a
! celebrated belle, and leave her without a
| sigh: he could smile at the captivatin @
manners which cvercame his fellows. K r
gardlug society as a battlefield. he went
thlther armed at all points resolved to
maintain bis selt-pOss session, and be on the
| "dtCu against Luo WlI6S Oh woman. de had
seen lovely girls in the drawing-room,
followed their graceful movements ia the
dance, heard them breathe songs of senti-
ment at the piano, and walked beside them
on the promenade On these occasions he
| cody formed an estimate of their several
graces perfectly appreciated every finely
chiseed nose and tempting lip, noted with
care the hue and expression of the eye,
but walked proudly away at parting
| MINIMIZING to hjmself "a II this 400 vai
am ]. OF In love-"
But who can anticipate the weapon that
shall lay him low, or make adequate pro
vision against the ineXhaustible resources
of love? Mcneil had sat for week al
table, opp site an invalid widow and
hec daughter. He had passed them pots-
toes not less than dozen times, and help
ed the young lady twice to cherry pie.
| The only impress ion he had derived from
their demeanor and appearance was that
they were very genteel and quiet. On the
morning after his conversation in the
garden he awaked just before sunrise, ano
found himself lying with his face to the
wall, in one ofthe diminutive chambers in
| whoa visitors at the Springs are SO uncere
moniously packed. His eyes opened within
SIX inches of the plaster; and he amused
himself for some minutes In copjuring The
cracks and veins it displayed into the i'm.
agnary fora of warriors and amin l3. a
length his mind reverted to himself anc
his present quarters.
well, Pve been here just for night,
thus he unused, and q pretty dull Time
I've had of it. Day after day, the same
stupid routine. IL the morning l swallow
six glasses of Congress wa er at the spring
win the hollow eyes of that sick minister
from Cor nectlcut g iarlng on me like ser
pent, and the idle-away tones of that ner.
vous lady from Philadelphia sounding like
knell IN my ears. l cannot drink in peace
.or those everlasting IA isses HILL who al
In.ee chatter at once, and expect me to b,
entertaining and talkative so early in tn
inihg' with my stomach full of colo
T1r9alu' ana long day in perspective
Ahen comes breakfast. The CHATTER O
Plates, the murmur of voices, the rushins
81 lack walters, and the var ETY. OF steams
make nae glad TO Retreat l find still
Q rner OF the piazza. and begin to r, ad, Blu
the HES, draft of air, or the Intrusive
ga0bie OF my cquain ances, utterly pre-
vent me from becoming absorbed ia
b ok. 1t has now grown too warm to walk
and look in vain for DR.. Clayton, who i
the only man here whose CONVEX sation in
terests me-" . - .-..r..-g
Il avoid the billiard-r because
know who l shall meet there The swips
is occupied. The drumming on the piano
OF hat old maid from Providence MAKES
the saloon uninhabitable. They are talk
ing politics in the bar>room The very
sight of the newspapers gives me q loualm
irVoluntarily be gin to doze when tha
Internal gong sounds the hour 10 dress
NO matter; anything for relief Dinner il
NIL q hnr fhor