davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
- -
RTSSETS.

An exchange states that clerk in gov
ernment Office at Washington was injured
by an accidental discharge Of his duties.
1t will not occur again.
A New ork amusement goe- objects to
paying SO 10 hear Patti sing Comm
Thro' the Rye We suspect that be would
rather invest the $40 in such a manner that
the rye would go through him.
\ man who win coolly spit on his hands,
pie, up the axe and deliberately knock a
turkey stone dead and cat him on Thanks
giving Day, only. waits for the advent Of
war to bring out the latent demon in his
soul
schoolmistress just beginning a nice in
proving lesson upon minerals to the juni-
orsJ Now, what are the principal things
We get out Of the earth? ?' Youthful an
gcr, aged confidently Worms"
"To tell you the truth, remarked a con-
yalescent public functionary to an inquir-
ing friend, 81 don't know whether tie ma
laria TIM. made me sick came from tie Xii
well Bottoms Or not, but Tn morally GER
tain that it came in q bottle"
When old ,Irs Buns5y had got through
reading in the paper an account Of the last
great fire she raised her sPcctacIcs from her
eyes to the top Of her head and remarked
"If the fireman would swear the genuine
homo-knit stockings, such as We make and
wear in the country, they wouldn't be a
Dustin Of their hose at every fire."
They tel good story about one Wy
name, dimiuutiye drummer well known
here and on the Comstock He stopped
one night at Dem;ug, New Mexico, favor
ite resort Of the cowboy.
Madame" said Abe TO the laudlady,
give rte s5mc dinner and be quick about
it. have not dined since Yesterday"
The lady brought him some bean soup.
Madame, take that soup away. Ineyer
cat soup. Bring on the roasts right away"
The lady brought him large plate Of
pork aud beans
Madame, take that away. Ineycr cat
those things.
In vain the lady explained that pork and
beans was the best the house afforded. lie
was obdurate and wanted roast beet, rare.
4 mild mannered, blue eyed cowboy at the
table then Clipped in: Begin pardon,
stranger, but you must excuse the lady.
We"
"Who are you, sir?" retorted the drum
mer 81 know my business"
You don't tell me-" said the festive
cowboy, drawing his navy. "Now, you
eat them beans. I'm goin' to set here an
see you fed. Light into 'em quick, or I'll
open YOU sure, and put 'em in. This is
bizness with ne, an Pm shoutin' in yer
ear"
The unfortunate drummer saw blood in
the air, and was forced 70 choke four plates
Of the unwelcome food down before the
COWBOY WAS satisfied with his apology to the
landlady.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
NOTES.

silk damasks are now made by pasting
thin silk tissue on cotton.
Pennsylvania and New York absorb half
the Presbyterian strength of the country.
Greece is evidently growing. The Cor
inth canal has progressed very far and rail-
roads are building throughout the kingdom.
The juice and strained palp of stewed cell
cry added to the batter of oyster fritters lend
delicate flavor.
The WASHINGTON departments nc said to
use as stationery" miles of tape, acres Of
paper, cords Of pencils and tons Of steel pens.
The lily of the Scriptures. according to
some authorities, was the purple iris, the
fcar de lis, plant considered sacred to the
Virgin Mary.
No man, for any considerable period, can
wear one face 10 himself and another to the
multitude vtroul fnaily gcttingbcwildered
as to which may be true.
The seeds Of golden miilet form IN excel
lent grain for feeding chickens during the
first three weeks OF thcir lives. Very small
chicks need very small seeds.
Swallowing the white OF an egg viii pre-
vent choking. \ regiment OF men might
choke before the white Of an egg could be
procured horeabouts this side Of Christmas.
The six largest States, named in their or
der, are Texas California, Colorado, Ncya-
da, Oregon and Kansas The six smallest
States, beginning with the least, are Rhode
Island, Delaware Connecticut, New jersey,
Massachusetts, and New Hampshire.
The Duchess dc Filz james has developed
laudablc cccea,ricity. She has successful
ly engaged in combating the phylloXera in
the South e France by grating French
vines on American seedlings. Her theory
is that the French vines are worn out, and
she proposes to start vines with an Ameri-
can constitution.
Before the medical society Of Victoria,
Australia, Or. Day recently stated that for
diphtheria patients living remote from pro-
lessional aid lie hadsof.on and with best re-
salts prescribed frequent salt and water
gargle-tablespoon to tumbler lull-and
for young children an occasional teaspoon
ful rs drink.
When people see horses head drawn up
by the bearing rein, and see him stepping
short and champing his bit, and linging his
foam fakes to the right and lett, tossing his
head and rattling the harness, they assume
that he is acting in the pride Of his strength
and fulness of spirit; whereas, the animal
is really suffering agonics Of pain, and is
trying to gain by these movements momen-
tary relief
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
NEWST NOTES.

Oak wood can be bought at Lexington,
Georgia, for sixty-fye cents a cord.
The latest estimate of the cotton crop Of
'81-2 Is 4,709. 2S7 bales.
The Patti concert for the Michigan suf-
ferers in New York last week netted $1,000.
4 certified cheque for $4,000 greeted
Rev. DR.. StoTrs' reaching tie 35th year Of
MS Brooklyn pastorate.
Franklin street, the new southernmost
thorougafare in Alexandria, was laid out a
bout l7s1 and has remained a mere field un-
til lately.
In Baltimore on Saturday last the body
of a Mrs. Campbell, an inebriate, was found
in her home near President street depot,
horribly mangled.
The entire business portion OF Augusta,
Arkansas, was destroyed by fire on Monday
night. Fifty buildings consumed, involv-
ing loss of 100000.
Brayton Ives, a New Yorker, paid 49,
600 for an illuminated missal the other day
not too large to slip into an overcoat Pock-
ct.
Near President Harrison's grave, at North
Bend, Ind, there is TO be built Methodist
Church as amemorial Of him, which will
bear his name.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
AGNOsTTCISM.

We hope aspire, and dream, but only know
The current life We now are living here,
So sweet to most they ask no higher sphere
Art. science freedom peace, can make to glow
Like fahled heaven, this world, which long ago
Was deemed q place Of harsh probation dreari
Only yestibule where, pale with fear,
Men should salvation seek by pepancc grim.
Foully this glorious world the saints oehed
'Tis one of the innumerous orbs that swim
Through ccsn.ic space on grayitation's tide
With beauty as d garment clothed, il spins
About the sun. buoyant, in orbit vide,
Nor rays one beam the less because Of human
sins
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
Vol. 7l.---VOL II, NEW SERIESI CHARLESI(
B0OGS.

HANDSOME Family Quarto Bibles 500
l / Worcestcr's Unabridged Dictionary $40.
Bryants Selection of Poetry and song $o.W'-.
Barllett's Familiar Quotations $500; bryant S
Complete Poems illustrated, 500 Owen Mer-
idith's Lucille $50; Shakespeare Complete
Works s3O0 Campbc.l's Selection OF fog'nsS' !
The Po3ular Ianslowue Editions complete of
English Poets. Byron, Burns Moore, Words
worth. Pope Coleridee, Campbell, etc, Sl.O9-
Father RYAN. Robt Browning, EdEar \. zoe
from 81 .25 to $3.50. The Diamond Edition OF
-Longfcilow, Whittier, SAKE, Bret Harte'
&c. 75c. Chambers Encyclopedia, complete,
- VOL. edition Of ls,0, cloth binding, 500
Same with American editions. large type, 10 v,
cla.h binding sl3: same half Rus ia- SIS.
We Viii order and furnish any booi, publish
el I'm short time and al moderate prices, Or
dor. e1liritai
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
9IRGINIA FREE PRESS.
TER Ms.

r6~TusFRsg Pass is published weekiy a, f'so
p ,isr.st} F.iif Cent' per etRtnl in 'tc8"ee'
rrTIgEE DOLLARS if aot paidin advance.
).r.t-a,A FVly Cents Tor ''r months.
r-rh, terms Of advertising are. for square
"a, ia-A or less. G,s Dole Ssd Fuzzy te"i't tor
,b-., rtioas larger ones in the same proper
lion. Zach c1atinptnce tlty Cents
.sr-Vo advertisement O. be considered oy tne
,ooth or wear uniess specified on the Manuscript
,- or-rieu.ls agreed upon between tae par''es'
~ An sd-ertis-isert rot marked on tae copy
.,ras1,eiH,i nuuoer OF Insertions wi.l De- con
.i,n,d antii ordered out, aad payment will oe
xactcd accordingly.
.s~Re.rLAS AovsRr.sgysNrS,-to aTcid any
,isuod-rstaudiug ou ,he part of the annua aa'er-
ti.r.t ia r,,.- to state tifilci'y that their Pgl
vils-e on.v extends te cir Immediate business
Real Estate legal a.. 1,her tdvertiseme nts sent
bv then 90 be aa additional charge, and 90 var'a-
Won.
~ obituary notices Of more than Eve lines
will be charged Tor.
JOB WORE Posters. Sale BITS, Circu'37s'
Cards. sc. Executed promptly, neatly ana affair
prices.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
uNDER TnE AL,loNp TREE.

Ny love was out IL the garden,
Under the almond tree,
All in the blush of blossom
That blows for the honey bee.
] came up over the daisies,
Before She could turn tosec,
Icaught her hand ani kissed i
Under the almond tree.
She flushed Ike a rose IN summer
She stepped aside from me.
IL am young, she said, and happy.
And pray you le, nae be-
TO be happy" / said, " il necdeth
That a man and q maid agrcc;
And / turned and lcii he. weeping
Under the almond tree.
She made a step through the daisies.
She called with q sob 10 rae,
She said, " How can / bo happy
Ifyou are not there % seey'
looked in her ewes and fingered;
Like blossom II May biushcd She
7 clasped her close, and Kissed her
Under the almond tree
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
POETA V.
THE COMPARATIVE DECREE.

Oh. grandma sits in her oalSen chair,
And in flies Bessie with tangled hair
a. I'm going to be married, oh, grandmamma
Tn going 70 be married Ha la ina, Ia
Oh. grandma smooths oat her apron-strng; -.
" Do YOU know, my dear, It's q solemn thing?
" lis solemncr rot to, grandmamma,
I'm going 20 be married 1ia, ha ha, ha
Oh. grandma smoothes out her apron-string,
And gazcs down on her wedding ring,
And still she smiles as she drops tear;
IT'S solemncr not to- Yes, my dear
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
NOAH WALKER & co.
IG5 andIG7 west Baltimore Greet,
U.NLTENsORKG,


ItNiIl te apparent to .uE One. who w.i eN-
auine ~.rrr l,.tr Wtrcu. That aside ir.ih
tlc necessary thickness Cor engraving and p'.-
i-lil- . ,.rEen -HrHr,llno ot tac precious metal
u-.l r..l.fuu.y ,o ~riieu and hold t.'e cn-
eri,,i portions lu .lce. and supply the ncce--
sop, -.fai.v aaj strength. The surplus eH.t
S a.tu. IS needless SD tar a- UTILITY aui beauty
.re Concerned ln JAMES Boss ffIENI
GOLD WATCH CASES. this WASTE oft precious
mc.Jl is oyercl-uc and fle -tvE s'IIpIN ANp
-rnr>etu prolucej at from ouc-th.ri DO one
halfot tucu~u.l cost of solid cases. The prv-
c.-- i-of rhe mo-, simple nature. us follows %
l-atc af uickle composition mt;al c~lec'i iiy
aa.rtol tl thc purpose has tw' pilates OF -o-Ip
conn .H. Iere.i one 1u each side. Inc three are
Chem pa-~e. between polished strc. rollers. ana
the r.-uI-i-a-.- puf heavy plated conn position,
from waich ttc cl>cs. backs, centres, h-zcie,
,lc.. arc cu- and shaped hy suitable DIES aut
former. Thc-o,i iu these cases IS sufficiently
thics ta admit oi al kinds ~ chasing ensrlV-
ing aul cnaaelins, thc engraved cases have
been carried Wtil worn perfectly smooth hy
tlm.ari u-, without removing the gold.
THIS ISTllE ONLY CASE MADE WITH
TWO PLATES or SOLID GOLD AND WAR
RANIED BN SPECIAL CERTIFICATE.
For sale hy al jewellers Ask for illustrated
tltal1Eue. and t1 -,e warrant.
April .. SLY.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
TCICLEs

no pay-rcnts.
The young girl who drorpci a basket Of
eggs while flirting made mash
The man who was itching for Office was
elected: but it was by q scratch.
There is a dvorecity Of opinion between
many men and their wives.
Another urgent reason why Gui;eau
should be hanged is bis threat to lecture ii
he is acquitted.
The child never sees the necessity Of strict
obedience until it becomes apparent
A man can possibly have no aaectioa for
rheumatism, and yet hc will d. almost any
thing for it.
Fair umpire at lawn tennis" Only kccr
your head, Mr. Jones, and you are sure to
have soft thing"
A man never feels poor when he has a
ten-dollar bin 70 wrap on the outside Of his
roli of ones.
The Couricr-Jomno'say7 that Russian
word coming through The telephone breaks
all the fu iiiturc in the room.
Sister, is your bunion better?
Tell me how il looks to-day
In the cleaning is bad time
For girl to play croquet.
The Philadelphia CiromcatHraH
thinks that Eve was a giddy yonng thing
because she got married when She wasa day
old. u
-Four hundred people are employed in
the Philadelphia mint, and are making
money Picayuae. just as great many
others make it--for somebody olse 20 spend,
Patti SAYS she loves Ibis country. Tlmgs.
right That's the way to talk. But VIC
don't buy $40 tickets to her concert just tho
same We're patriot for seat in the
parquet circle for about -.
Said the lecturer: The roads up these
mountains are too stecn anl rocky for even
a donkey to climb; thc.,fafe did not at
tempt the ascent"
Joncs-" Whatdidy you think ot my arpu-
men,, Fogg?" Fogc-" f. was oyni-yery
sound. Jones isdeiishii) Nothing but
sound in fact" ,Ioa- -,ac,od .ora brick.
"An' that's the iHsr Of Icuale,?" she
said, adjusting her .ii,'rsp .ci-cles era
cious, what's the res oi hia bedoloihcs
likew
Trained dogs exhibit go much intelligence
that it probably Wont be long before there
will be sausage in the market ,hat car
talk.
4 pink-eyed horse anil bo'tailel caF,
o, the maiden is f,.r o see,
As she sits demuro by VIC si1r Of her ma
Picked pigs fec;, and tho beea for threc
A Western paper contain. an account Of
a young lady cl.armingar Bu. that's
nothing. We have haawn g0uag lady 70
charm a democrat
Sweet Nuisance Can gga zen mo where
you can find perfectly hoaei man? No;
We cannot. We haven To- renote5t idea
where we shall be b. BE .ime you read
this.
General Gran, b fo4d of snanLld j eggs
and fried hams. so sr gs. ta > Victo-
toria prefers boiled nr',on ,ita caper
sauce We, too. PATH worhils boiled
maccaroni with tomato succ. Pas me one
plate.
We deny DR.. Talmalge aroioiton that
4
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10

The London Da,y Nars Of the 9th ult
says: at seems obvious that the question
of Guiteau's sanity and responsibility is a
matter Of word choPping and psychological
casuistry. Gaiteau is perfectly well aware
of the nature of his act. We mightsay that
Guiteau was crazed just As SO many people
are called crazod who are yet acknowledged
to be fit to control theii own affairs. II
Guiteau is declared insane n vast numberof
people feather-b Drained, conceitod fools, will
justly infer that they, too, may indulge in
eccentricities and murder"
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10

Mrs. Victoria c. Woodruff has returned
from Europe,-and will press her claims
for the Presidential succession, we suppose.
Well. as between Grant and Victoria we
saw Vic.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
SCIInnL ROOKS.

Full stock of an school Books used in the
Male ANA Female schools OF Chdrlestown ana
vicinity. West Virginia school Books at con
t-..cf fi~t,as
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10

An exchange assumes sanitarially to tell
Us How to lift thousand pounds If the
pounds are in old junl, we don't want to
know, and if they be the English sterling
article we can lift for all we're worth.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10

The vote fer Attorney-Goncral Of Virgin
ia at the recent election, as officially de-
clared at Richmond Monday, was as fol-
lows: Philip w. Mckinney, Democrat,
100, ,627; Franz s Blair, Readiuster-Repub-
lican, l129o0; Blair's majority, 1929.
At the Presidential election Of last year the
vote was: Regular Democratic, 96,449; !;
Readuster and Republican, 1l5, ,l6G; Read
iu,ter and Republican majority, lS7l7i
Democratic gain over 1880, G44A The
Democratic vote increased AIS, while the
combination iell off 1886 In the face Of
tn majority against them at the start and
the tremendous power of the Federal Adj
ministration with all its underlings exorted
in favor of their opponents it is but just
praise TO Virginia Democrats to say that
they fought a good fghi, and one Of which
thcy need not be ashamed.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-12-10
Iirejuia free gress.
T. y. d ". ". b. GALLAHER. Editors
Charlesto,rn, Jefcrs6,r County, ITest Va.
}ecentJer 10, 1881.

LITTELS LIVING AGE FOR 1882.
This widely-known weekly magazine has
been published for nearly forty years, end
during that long period has been priced by
its numerous readers as a thorough compen-
dunn of the best thought and literary work
Of the time. As periodicals become more
numerous, this one becomes the more yalu-
able. as continues to be the most thorough
and satisfactory compilation of the best pc
riodical literature of the world. It fills the
place of many quartcrlies, mothlies and
weeklies. and It's readers can through itspa-
ces easily and economically keep pace with
the work of the foremost writers and think
ers in all departments OF literature, science,
politics and art. It's importance to Ameri-
can readers is evident; in factit is well-nigh
indispensable to those who would keep in
formed in the best literature Of the day
and its success has therefore been uninter-
rupted. is prospectus is well worth attcn-
ton in selecting once periodicals for the
new wear. New subscribers remittinG now
for the year 1882, will receive the interyen-
ing numbers gratis, and its clubbing rates
with other periodicals are worthy Of notice.
Littcl & Co., Boston, are thc publishers.
Middletown transcript., 1881-05-06

And, at the end, we are told that when
honest Kit had married Barbara and
they had Il little family of boys and
girls, he would sometimes take them
to the street where his dear young mis-
tresS had lived; ''but improvements
had altered it SO much that it was not
like the same. The old house had long
ago been pulled down, and fine broad
road was in its place. y This destruc-
tiOn of the old place, indeed, may have
been purely imaginary on the authors
part, and an after-thought to hide its
identity from our prying eyes. We are
not forbidden, at least, to believe that
our sold Curiosity Shop is the genu
inc, original old shop: and it is.a par
donable, even if puerile, pleasure that
comes to us as we stand here at the
b0Ok-stall outside, looking i'll through
the open door, and refilling the place
with gaunt suits Of old armor and
ghostly bits of furniture with Nell
slumbering peacefully in their midst !;
their distorted forms not more alien to
her youth and purity than the living
shapes that move about her her gam
bier grandfather, her dissolute brother
Treat, the genial and ingenious dwarf
Quilp, and our own, our beloved, Dick
Swiveller. r.-Scribaer for May.
Middletown transcript., 1881-05-06
The Alleged "old curiosity Shop"

Just out of LincOln's Inn Fields, III
crooked little Portsmouth street, stands,
OF rather totters, crazy old house. 1t
is one of those venerable buildings which
are fast disappearing from the streets of
London, its knees crooked, its back all
awry. On its timber-crossed front,
filled in with dingy plaster, we read, in
odd, distorted lettering, "Ihe Old Curl
osity Shop" 1t has two stories, the
ground floor forming a tiny shop its
counter, and floor, and shelves heaped
and flowing Over-or so they were, only
last summer-with the most eXtraOrdi-
nary collection of old books that ever
pretended to be for sale. As we enter
through the little door, voluble man
tumbles down the misshapen, shaky
staircase from the upper floor into his
shop. Descanting on his books, eager
to make sale, the voluble man is, at
the same time, not loath to enlarge on
the local legend which relates that
Dickens took from this house the title
and made it the scene Of his story of
the same name. The foundation for
this fable is, 1 fancy, about as shaky as
that of the house itself seems to be,
having no other ground, so far as can
discover, than a pardonable, albeit mis-
guided, desire on the part of this pow
erty-stricken neighborhood to lift itself
into an easy an inexpensive notoriety.
1t is pleasing delusiOn, however, and
l give it for what it is worth. Indeed,
there may be something in it. 1t is
impossible to identify even the quarter
of the town in which ''The Old Curios-
ity Shop of the story is located nei-
ther in Master Humphreys first walk
there,-when, me ting Little Nell wan
.dering in the streets of the city atdusk,
he accompanies her to her home, "a
long distance away, and in quite
another quarter of the town, nor in
any subsequent mention of the place,
is any clew given as to its location.
Middletown transcript., 1881-05-06
NO. l9.
AS TO HUGGING.

We are sorry to see so many of the
humorous papers find any fun in the
incident of the girl at Keokuk who was
hugged to death by her lover. He had
proposed to her, in her fathers parlOr,
and she had accepted him, and in
moment of ecstacy he hugged her to
his breast, and she died at once. The
young man was horror-stricked, and
called her parents. 1t is supposed that
she died of heart disease. The case
was very sad, indeed, and papers should
not make fun of an occurrence that
brings so much sadness. However.
while this case is fresh in the minds of
old and young, We will embrace the
opportunity, and embrace it gently, for
fear we will kill it, to again impress
upon young people what we have so
often advised, and that is to be unusu-
ally careful about how they hug girls.
Many young man hugs girl almost
to death, and he never knows how near
he comes to being a murderer. Girls
nowadays are not what they used to be
when you and were young, Maggie
They cannot stand as much grief now
as girls did twenty years ago. Some
how, they don't seem to be put up for
hugging. If man puts his arm around
a seventeen-years-old girl of the present
day, and sort of closes in on the belt,
he expects to hear something break.
Many humane man lets go before he
has got girl half hugged because the
girl looks so frail that he is afraid he
will break her in two. Of course there
are exceptions to the frail girls, but the
majority are too much like bundle of
asparagus. Some of the girls of the
present day are robust, and seem to be
offended if person let's up OH the hug
ging on their account, and it is said
that they hug back with a vigor which
reminds a man of the days of long ago,
but they are few and far between. Too
much care cannot be exercised in put
ting arms around the young girls of to-
day, and we would wish to impress this
fact upon the minds of the young men
who are just coming upon the stage of
action. OF course, men along in
twenty do not need advice. The boys
are apt to put more force into the right
arm than they are aware of, hundred
per cent. more than they would be apt
to do in saving wood, or carrying up a
scuttle of coal. They should bear in
mind that girls are too valuable to be
used in developing the muscles, as you
would in a gymnasium. You don't
have to squeeze a girl till her liver is
forced from its normal position, and she
chokes and catches he breath, to show
her that you love her. A gentle squeeze
of the hand, the stealing of the arm
around her waist when she is not look
ing, and the least pressure upon her
belt, is all the law requires. She can
tell by your face whether you love her,
as you sit there in the twilight looking
into the guiding star eyes, as well as
though you grabbed her as you would a
sack Of wheat, and hung on like dog
to root.-G. W. Peck.