The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1881-07-07
WHOLE NO 1854.
HUM0R


The man who searrie5 the dey'' in
Algiers drives a cab.
Some women Wh5 90 fauer ITcfz len't
When 4 man applies for a estimation AZ
policeman itis snppOsedshs1 has taste
for club life.
A medical writer says children need
more wraps than adults. They reder-
ally get more
He wrote it; '.Benot weary in yell
doing It came -up- smiling in cold
type: ''Be nOtweary in well-digging.
A rising artistic in Paris is named
Nile. Dram. Ihe public arerfEirlg in
tOXicated when they can drink in her
sweet, melting Melody
Ali experience goes to show that
people are lar more liable . e11ract
disease or rcOntagiOns feyers on On empty
than with a ful stomach
4 great many people who want TO be
wrapped Up-yFel wien thaFI5l De- a5
night dislhe very much to be raped
up in the morninG.
IlereVas : J-7IlrlE- rl5-io lzlIl0.i AIall l0ry,
VINO drew Buta Fl.Iy- al-llla
ben Be went snow
H.3 purse rigda higl go
To seatiR-the-uppernOs gallery.
'.No, sir, saiJi sa fprOminent man.
81 won't have a 0anduet rendered TO
me. Folks would think I had been
mixed up in some -FascaHty.
In a ease recently tried III Bsurgr the
jury rendered a. verdict OF S15062 II
Tie intelligent juror stood divided two
hours and a-half-en the half cent re-
turned in the verdict.
Spanish lace aRd broncb biatcold5 ar
Immensely fashionable, ohIF She lace IS
more difficult -t0-sbtain than the cold.
That may be foundiH alIthe opeR h0rsa-
cars. 49,
a New York paper saFs Shat q man
Of honor needs no oath. That may all
be, but when -youl lend him any money
take q Dhattel m0rtgags and your sleep
win be sounder.
He had been telling her stories Of
himself, and had done 8 great amount
Of braggingi when he had finished, she
kissed him and mUmured, This is
kiss for o blow. .N-ElIck
A French WritsF says: used TO be-
ieve that-wOmen- prefer those whom
they think .handsQmss Errors They
prefer. those who think them hand
some. ~ ~ - G
A Cineinnati. man has been arrested
for biting a piece out Of his wife's arm.
So q man who loves his wife we'll
enough to eat her is 80 have no credit
for it.
We once heard a gentleman speak in
ferYid admiration Of a minister's s gift Of
PRAYER. That man prays hk5 the
devil he said. The compliment
! seemed a questionable one Cbzzsiqa
RegisteI;
A woman pianist Wno pIays with on
ly one hand is just nov the talk Of Paris.
If we remember rightly, the Italian or
ganist invariably plays with only one
hand. The Hahau has 8 wonderful
turn formusic. -
The circus men seem 70 be losing
their grip. Not q cage of lions has es-
capped for two weeks, nor ha5slli5 intel
hgent elephant struck down q burly
rufian iust as,he was about to attack an
inohensive OId man.
A doctor went out for a DAYS hunt
ing. and on coming home complained
that he hadn't killed anything. '.That's
because you didn't attend to your le-
gitimate business, . said his wife
A farmer in Kossuth county, Iowa,
has a sheep with two mouths, the sec
ond one being under the right ear, and
lit opens and shuts with the other.
What q valuable member Of the Legis-
lature this sheep would make if it
could only talk!
The New York Star tells Of Ger
man shoemaker who, having made q
pair Of boots for q gentleman Of whose
financial integrity be had considerable
doubt, made the following reply to him
when he called for the articles: s'Der
pOots ish not quite done, but der beel
ish made out.