Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1881-10-08
A DOuble-Barreled Joke.
San Francisco Post.

The other evening, round at Nc
Governs saloon, the boys were put
ting up an elaborate practical joke Oh
somebody, and they asked old Cap
tain Skiddy, WAC had just happened
in, to take hand ~.
"No, gentlemen" said that es
Unable old citizen decisive!y; "you
don't catch me taking part in any
practical jokes. went out of that
business for good over ten years
ago"
"How was that ?" asked the group
of beer eXterminators.
"Well, in the winter of 10, may
be II, I was living in Davenport,
Ia, and a man came round there
giving balloon ascensions. One day
it was advertised that the mayor of
the town was going up with him.
Now, the mayor was a big, fat
man, who always wore a
light suit of clothes and a
white hat. This put me in
the notion of working off a joke on
the people. I got acquainted with
the aronaut, and he agreed to assist
me in the scheme. We then got an
old suit of light clothes and fixed up
a dummy, which we filed with sand,
so that it weighed about 200, and
would, therefore, drop straight and
heavy like a man. The day of the
ascension there were over 10000
people on the ground, and the ex-
element was very great, as there
was light wind blowing at the time.
After the balloon got up about a
mile, and maybe that far south of the
town, they dropped the dummy
over"
big sensation then, eh?"
"Well, I should say so. But that 8
just where I lost my grip. While the
crowd was shouting and going wild
with horror, I just laid down on the
ground, rolled over, and laughed I'M
til was just sick"
"Should think the crowd would
have taken q tumble, too," suggested
the audience.
"But just wait. Of course, the
crowd made break out of town to
scrape up the remains, and I rushed
home to get my fishing tackle, for 1t
struck me that the most healthy thing
1 could do would be to go fishing for
Il day or two. Before l left the
house, however, I was arrested for
murder"
"For murder?"
Exactly. A lot of the boys, ac-
companied by the sher Fl, rushed in
and collared me. They claimed that
the dummy had fallen on a farmer
and driven his skull clear into the
heels of his boots. They said that
the balloonatic had turned State's
evidence, and the chances were I'd
be hanged by a mob before night.
"That was rough"
"Well, SO I thought. I was just
scared plum to death, and I begged
the boys to stand by and protect me
ponied up $50 for legal expenses
and they hid me in the garrett of 9
neighbor' s house. They kept me
there ten blessed days, and there
wasn't day but they struck me fol
twenty or two for contingencies
One night the whole gang came
around full of beer-on my money
mind you-and said that they had
concluded, as additional precaution
to hide me in the hollow of an oal
tree about three miles out in tn.
woods. I saw through the whole
business then, and drove 'em ou
with club. It was a good square
case of the bitter bit, I know, bu
they never let up calling me DUNN,
Skiddy after that, until they actual,
run me out of the town, and 1 hat
to emigrate to this jumping off plac
of creation" and the captain shool
his head with a Disguised air, as b.
paid for his hot Scotch and Wake.