The Sunday herald. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1866-1887, 1881-01-09
OLD DUPLICATE.

From his earliest days he had propensity TO possess
two things lust alike; when q boy he wanted two
knives, two marbles, two kites two tops, etc, etc.
When he had come to manhood, as he was rich and
never married, he was bound 10 carry out his odd
idea and he always bought two Of everything that he
took notion to; two horses, two watches, two Goals
two hats, ETC., etc. lie wanted to adopt two boys,
but he could not do because he could not nnd two
just alike.
lie had big, ld-fashioned house, and everything |
In II was In duplicate; two parlors, two dining -rooms
two libraries two clocks In the hail. two hat-racks,
two mirrors, and so on Throughout. lie wanted |
to eat two breakfasts, dinner aud two suppers
daily, but his servants growed too much that, |
and rs ne soon found that he had not two stomachs,
he gave up that idea.
His idosyncrasy was apparent that everybody, In
good -naturcd way, called him Old Duplicate, and he
rather liked the nickname.
He had nephew, wild young fellow, Of whom he
was foud, who bcd himpretty freely and humored his
oddity great deal.
Among many other duplicates about his double
house he had two guest chambers that were much
alike art taste, and money could make thcm the
furniture ornaments cirtdlns, and everything els.
exact counterparts and tho doors leading into
them from the hall and the lainbrequins over the
door were exactly alike, too
These chambers had caused trouble more than once.
one summer, wheh Old duplicate was at the springs,
his nephew had been TO wedding, very ialf5 day.
and came home elevated and exceedingly wet. and
sloshcd around In OF the elegant rooms, and naly
tumbed through the silk curtains into the bed
with his wet clothes aud muddy boots on, and lay
there very restless for hour wo then he got up
with tremendous headache and went down stairs
FOR bottle Of soda water, which he drank with
Gus haste, went up stairs again, aud, by mistake,
he went nS the Uthet e'tgatt tocin ros,ed around
there, and tnmbed through the silk ciiitans bf thtt
bed with his clothes and boots on, and slept heavily
| till next morning. At another time Miss JaDe the
housekeeper, busting of these rooms and was
called of when she half through to answer the
door-be, and when she returned she haf-dusied the
other room, and never discovered her error. And at
still ahbtttt time old duplicates old college chun
was In town visit, and as lie always went to bed
little sherry, he rang the bell for Miss Jane's
brother, the kptler to bring him his wine after he
had retired and the butler always contended that he
did lust he ordered, and lett the sherry at the
gentemans bedside, but the fact he left 1t In the
other room,
If such mistakes as the-e wetc male by the occu-
pants of the double house, is 1t at all remarkable that
strangers made far greater ones Is 1t to be wondered
atf parties unfamiliar with them mansion stumbled into
errots that Involved lifelong regrets and terrible
chagih,
We should say not.
One day his nephew said to Old Duplicate: " Uncle
there are twin bridegrooms down at the hotel. ''
" Indeed ~ "Yes, Uncle, and they have married
twin ssters.'' "ls 1t possible!, 4" Yes, Uncle,
wouldn't II be Jolly for You to get acquainted with
theiii, aid haze tSi i.5rs + d,htct'' Delightful,
my boy-could you bring 1t about -" Eyes, know
them. They will stay all night II you press them,
and they can occupy the duplicate chambers. ~
"Delightful again, my boy. Dear me what a Jolly
idea how appropriate. 1t is too good to be true.
Bring them here at o. clock tomorrow, and III
give them bird dinner that will be too choice to be
soon forgotten, and you must stay TO dinner, too
s5 THE hebhev went 70 Invite the couples and Old
Duplicate rang for his hcusekeeper 81 Mi5s Jane
, I'm going too market TO buy two prairie chicken:
and two three other little things for tomorrow
dinner and wish you to suggest anything else thai
ought to GET Miss Jane suggested couple beef
! tongues ''Don't say couple, Miss Jane-never 81.
, couple--say two.''
So Old duplicate went to market and laid In enough
OF the very best Of everything TO feed hotel ant
: ths nest day the nephew brought tho couples in tn
5 old gentlemans carriage.
The grooms were wonderful alike and the brides
resemblance was astonishing.
They had been married three or four days only
and little shy at first, but after the ladies ha
taken their wraps off up stairs and the gentlemen ha
left their overcoats and hats the two hat-racks
/ the hall, and the old gentleman had, with old-t tim
ga,lantry, kissed the brides and called each Of t
d grooins my dear byy,'I tier felt at home an
!. enjoyed their dinners hugely.
At about 10 O'Clock the brides retired. and tn
grooms sat with Old Duplicate and his nephew in til
library smoking for an hour two; then they wane
u to go to bed. fie coed bid man knowing nothing
r the dreadful and horrible future, accompanied I'll
, newly-married young men Into the hall, and said
If "Harry, my dear boy, you take the room Oh yor
!, right, Just at the head of the hall; and Albert IN
"a dear boy. you take the your left.''
,e The grooms found that their wives had left Il
J. gas burning, and they let 1t burn and went to bed
u Old Duplicate was III the habit Of turning off Il
n gas at the nielef IN e hail. attct he had undresst
&c he cit 1t OF and went 10 bed aid to Sleep; bt such
t; sleep, and how lie dreamed
I, Il He was was flying through endless space al
/ swimming through mighty seas, and then he w
walking In the street, and boct-black said to hin
% 'Isay, old Double barrel, they're In the wroi
A. beds!' ''What!'' said the old gentleman with
l. start. ''thet in the wroig beds; that's what
ut Then he was In the mountains trouting with
es nephew, and he caught monstrous fish that look
VI like Miss Jane, who ga7ed up Mt him demurely, al
st said: 90 Excuse me, sir, but fear they're In
X wrong beds. ~ "Nonsense!'' said he. And then
u at the Pimlico races, and had Just taken fan
t to horse that had head on him like his nepbe'
IS that reached over the fence and said: "Uncle Il
blowed II don't believe they re In the wrong beds.
ke Z" Fudgei'' said he. 'No fudge about It, ~ said
-. nephew, ieathing over hin; "t'm 50 sure about
A. that have come here to wake you. / don't kn'
k, what makes think So but believe they're In t
ds wrong beds.', 'Don't say say that don't say tn,
Fred, ~ said the old gentlenan sitting lip In his be
er lord bless mel twould be horrible to be true
X, Well; maybe 'tain't trtg but IN bet on
.. what's the matter with this gasp "It's cut Q
u Fred; Just step into the hall and turn 1t Mer
EN- full heavens, said the good old man, getting
drawing Ills wrapper, Fred returned and light
ng tile gas, if that's the its my fault. What
10 be done, Fred9'
Nothing" said Fred; "let them alone; It's
ID in the family
ea "But my stars Fred, how in the name of
'' N that's good could / have made such contour,
sh error? what's that?'' There was uenlend
racket up stairs In the duplicate chambers, and
he grooms out and shouted over the rail: "Is tn
SSs 'Se anybody awake down there ~ "Yes, my d
he boys, said Old Duplicate looking up from the 10y
fth hall. "Phew! - said Harry, "there's sometli
lGh dreadfuly wrong up here
~ a. ~ know 1t, / know 1t I've done you both III
as grevous wrong-unintentionally. IN make all
or amends possible wouldn't have done such tn
M MFu- purposely for the world -
ths 'eracious alive Harry, open the windows, +"
IN, Albert.
the Don't don't, beg Of you, said the old g
@ e tleman, very much startled, as an Idea crossed
of mind that the young men, overcome. might conte
q plate suicide. 'Do nothing rasi surely 1t eau
ng- that bad -
you 'Wby, we're nearly smotheied, and my wife
led tainted, i" said Harry ''And mine, too, -
,ble Albert. "Yes yes, know, said Old Duplic'
'but it's one Of those dreadful errors that can
rectihed. It's known to but few. l give you
word Of honor, my dear boys, that I'll never brea
of 1t, and n Fred ever does III cut him OF ~
De- 'There's some misunderstanding here, ~ said
tor, bert, f" "and-" Misunderstanding - said
Eve Eye old man, ~ know 1t, and only should suffer,
has | you and your innocent wives ~
,re But the fact is, " said Harry, " that these ro
Will are full of gas.'' 'what'' said Old Dupllc;
lla, 'Gas, " said Harry. al went to bed and left
rye gas burning and woke up and found II blown out
her the room funr $50 did ], ~ said Albert.
In 'To be sure my dear boys, - said the old gen
@ neI man, his heart tightening tremendously; 81 owe
h in a thousand apologies. Throw the windows up
ely few moments and let 1t out. There's nothing
yoi wrong, hopel'
sas l,sn Nothng," said the grooms and they again
ss OF TO Ded.
odi- 90 Thank tho Good Giyer ~ said the old geneIr
ott from the bottom OF his heart and he cut the gas
nv again. went to bed and slept the sleep OF the just
Wig His rascally nephew, Fred when he returned t'
BY a room, winked wink and said softly To himself
rces knew they were all right all tho time, but