The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1881-07-22

These are generally casual visitors, who
bring their notions of Spring from
somewhere else, and cannot OF course,
know how the natives feel about Spring.
And 40, the first thing they know, the
opportunity 20 inquire how they feel
has permanently gono by. Laughter.
Old probabilities has a mighty repu-
tation for accurate prophecy, aud thsr-
oughly we'll deserves it. You take mp
the papers and observe how crisply and
confidently ho checks off what to-dsy's
weather IL going 70 be on the Pacific,
down South, in the MIDDLE States, ia
the Wisconsin region, nce him sail
along in the JOY and pride Of his pow
er till he gets TO New England, and
then nee Ibis tail drop. iie doesn't
know what the weather IN TO be in
New England. fio cant my more
tell than he can tell how many Presi-
dents Of the United States tbcro ia
going to be Eext year. Applause.
Well, he muIls oyer IL, and by and by
he gets out something about like this
Probably northeast 20 sonthwest winds,
varying TO the southwark and west
ward and eastward and points between
high and low barometer, sweeping
around from place TO place probably
areas of rain, snow, hail and drought,
succeeded or proceeded by earthquakes
and thunder and lightning. Loud
laughter. Then he jots dow, this
postscript from his wandering mind 10
cover accidents "But IL is possible
that the programme may los entirely
changed in the meantime" Loud
laughter.
Yea. one Of the brightest gems Of the
New England weather is the dazzling
uncertainty of it. There in only ons
thing certain about il, you are certain
there is going TO be plenty of weather.
Laughter. A perfect grand review
but you never eau tell which end Of the
profession il going TO move first. You
Tx up for the drought you leave your
umbrella in the house and sally out
with your sprinkling pot, aud ten 10
ono you gee drowned. Applause.
You make up your mind that the
earthquake is due you stand from un.
der and take hold Of something 10 |
steady yourself, and the first thing you
know YOU get struck by tightening.
| Laughter These are great disap- |
pointments but they can't be helped.
Laughter The tightening there is
peculiar ; u is NO convincing when i. |
strikes n thing il doesn't l,ave enough
OF that behind for you to t',il whether
well you'd think it Wis something val
liable, and "a Cugn-.amsn q hai i''.en
there. Loud laughter ani applause
And the thunder. When the thun-
der commences merely to tune up, and
scrape and saw anI key mp the inaifu.
ments for the perform .nec, Strangers
say, "Wby what awful tbumd.f 4 yon
have here Bot WHEN the baton is
raised and the real concert la.gins,
you'll find that stranger do~n Ia the
cellar, with bis head in the ash barrel |
laughter
Now, as to the size Of the weather
in New England d-lengthways mean.
II is utterly disProportionate to the
size of that little country. Laughter
Half the time when it is packed aa full |
as II can stick, you can see that New
England weather sticking out beyond |
l.he edges and projecting around hun
dred and hundreds Of miles over the |
neighboring States. Laughter. She
can't hold tenth part of her weather.
You can see cracks all about, where sae
has strained herself trying 10 do it.
Laughter.
j could speak volumes about the in
human perversity of the New England
weather, but will give but SINGLE |
specimen. like to hear rain on tia !
roof, so / covered part Of my roof with |
tin, with an eye TO that luxury. Well,
sir, do you ever think il rains on the
tin 7 No, sir skips it every time.
/ Laughter.
Mind, in this speech | have been
trying merely TO do honor TO the New
England weather no language could
do It. Laughter But afterall there
are at least one or two things about
that weathar Tor il you please, effects
produced by it) which we residents
would not like 10 part with. Ap-
plause. IL we had not our bewitchiug
autumn foliage, we should still have TO
credit the weather with one feature
which compensates FOR all its bullying
yagaries the Ice storm when leai:
less tree is clothed with ice from the
bottom 10 the top--ice thar Is rs bright
and clear as crystal every bow and
twig is strung with ice-beards, frozen
dew drops, and the whole tree sparkles,
cold and white like the Shah of Per
sia's diamond plume. (Applause.)
Then the wind waves the lnanches and
the sun comes out aud turns all those
myraids of beads and drops To piisms
that glow and hum and fash with all
manner of colored fires, which change
and change again with inconceivable
rapidity, from blue TO red, from red to
green. and green 60 gold the tree, be-
comes sparkling fountain, a very sx-
plosion Of dazzling jewels, and il stands
there the same, the climax, the snpre7
NEST possibility in art or nature Of be.
wildering, Intoxicating, intolerable
magnifcerca One cannot make the
words too strong. Q4ong continued
applause.
Month after month ] lay up hate
and grudge against the New England
weather but when the ice storm
comes at last, | say, sThere | forgive
you now the books are square be-
tween us you don't owe me cent ;
90 and sin no more your little faults
and foibles count for nothing you ara