Mexico weekly ledger., 1881-11-10
COMIC COLUMN.

The roar of the Niagara is pitched
in falls key.
Doctor Mary Walker Is ssfearfuny
and wonderfully maid." -...
If time is money, why isn't note
at four months as good as cash?
Loves young dream usually
merges. into matrimonial nightmare.
The woman who paints her cheeks
on sea voyage sails under false COL
ors.
The cheapest living is the prize
fighters. He can live on one mill a
day. -t'.t
A Dutchman repeated the adage:
birds NIT Won fedder goes NIT dem
selfs.'' -. :.
1t is impossible for three women to
keep the same secret unless two of
them are dead. 81
Four hundred people are employed
in the Philadelphia mint, and all are
making money. ...a
1t was a Connecticut minister
whose salary was $25 a year and half
the fish he caught.
A High school girl, upon being
asked if she liked Goldfish balls, said
she never attended any.
Previous to 1888 there were no
mules in this country. Neither were
there any paragraphers.
We are two dollars ahead. Made
it by selling manuscript poetry about
Garfield to the rag man.
Who says it is unhealthy to sleep in
feathers? Look at the spring chick
en- and see how tough he is.
A gamecock ought to be good eat
ing. Does not the poet say sthe
toughest are the tenderest?"
Why is the absence of the letter
m like the presence of -hand-organ
Because it makes u-sic of music.
The man who toes the mark-the
OLD man when he reaches out for
Jane AIMS feller at 2 o'clock a. m.
What is the difference between q
country editor and a pillow? One is
hard up, and the other is soft down.
eyes, SIR" said Mr.. Gallagher,
sit was funny enough to make a
donkey laugh l laughed till I cried. /"
Josh Billings truly says, a man who
gets bitten by the same dog twice is
better suited for that than anything
else.
The editor of Punch has fourteen
daughters. He'll have lively time
if he undertakes to board all his sons-
in-law.
On Greenland's icy mountains
there are no COWS. They make their
ice cream up there with whales
nn1nst.anu on cnc Juss Iu~...y 80
cause the unjust have borrowed their
umbrellas.
1t is now said that Adam Fore
paugh himself impersonates the beau
tiful woman in small towns where be
is not known.
An old poker player out in North
Park rides blind mule as a matter
of choice. He says it is a pleasure
to straddle the blind.
Theodore remarked, when Ange
lina's father showed him off the door
step, that the old gentleman had con
siderable push about him.
A Mobcrly man recently sold hi
wife to neighbor for dollar
Some men seem 70 take delight Ii
swindling their neighbors.
| A fashionable writer says: "Lit
tie boys aud girls. are considered
necessary part of bridal procession
nowadays" This appears to US
little too previous.
The most horrible case of insanit
in the Massachusetts Asylum is tbs
of man who imagines that be Is
Chicagoan. He gets up in the mic
die of the night to brag.
''Everything is lovely and the goos
hangs high," as the young lady sal
, when she finished arranging her roo
and had hung her sweethearts pi'
ture on the topmost nail.
An Albany paper tells Of woma
in that city who woke her husbar
| during a storm and said, 81 do vii
e to goodness you would stop that sno
n ing, so l can hear it thunder
4 At the breakfast-table, the eide
of the family, were talking about
). coming wedding. .
Il "Papa' asked the youngest bo
"what do you want to give the bri
away for? Can't you sell her?"
J "Uncle,' asked bright youi
o "was Homer very brave mani"
,. mot especially, Johnny. Why
>, you ask!''
"a "Because l often hear 'em t,
u about the land of the free and
l. Homer the brave, you know"
Nowadays, when you see h
ar band and wife together in public,
IN may make up your mind that TN
to are neither children or lap dogs IN
e. family. If such we're the case.
husband would have to remain
home with the children while the Y
u, went out with the dog.
or
ed Johnny had been in the strt
ch watching the antics of the org
We grinders monkey. When JohI
cir ran into the house, he shouted:
be "G-andmother, who made 10
ed keys?"
ty. "The Creator, my boy"
les "W Weli," said the grandson,
", know the Creator laughed when
ore got the first monkey done
CIV At recent wedding, the br
se, groom, being an officer, wore
sword at the marriage ceremony.