davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

~ 4 a Outfit furnished free, with full instructions
for conducting the most profitable busi-
NU ness that anyone can engage in The busi-
sly ness is so easy TO learn and our instrtc-
" u Vtions are so simple and plain that any one
can make great profits from the very start
No fail who is willing to work. Women ara
Ms successful men, Boys and girls can earn large
Many have made Mt the business over one hum
dred dollars in single week. Nothing like IL ever
known before. All who engage are surprised at the
and rapidity with which they able 70 make
money. You can engage in this business during your
spare time at great profit You do not have 20 invest
capital in It, We take all the risk Those who need
ready money, should write 20 at once. All frrn-
shed free. Address True Co, Augusta, Maine isgyi
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

MANHOOD

A lecture the nature, treatment and radical
cure OF seminal weakness. or spermatorrhu'a Undue
ed by selt-abusc, involuntary emissions impotency,
nervous debility, and mpedments TO marriage gci-
orally consumption, epilepsy and fits mental and
physical incapacity, &c.-By ROBERT J. CULVER
WELL, Nj. D., author of the "Green Book, ;" &c.
The word-renowned author, in this admirable lee
ture clearly proves from his own experience that the
awful consequences of scfabuse may be effectually
removed without dangerous surgical operations
bouges instruments, rings or cordals; pointing out
mode at certain and efIcctual, by which
every sufferer, matter what his condition may be-
may cure himself cheaply, privately and radically
90-This lecture will prove a boon TO thousands and
thousands.
Sent under seal in plain envelope, to any address
postpaid, on receipt of six cents two postage
stamps. We have also n cure for Tape Worm.
Address, THE CULVERWELL MEDICAL co,
II Ann St, New York, N. Y; Post Office Box 45S6.
50iy1
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05
WIT AND HUMOR.

WIT AND HUMOR.
Prof. Bells wife is deaf mute
Il dumb bell.-Win Wurtle.
A bear story is not necessarily the
naked truth.-Modern Argo.
When do dogs most resemble cards
When they belong to pack.-Ex.
An exchange calls Eli Perkins a
flower Of journalism. He certainly
isn't lie-lac.-Lowell Courier.
When man is making love to a
widow he always feels as if he had to
begin where the other fellow left Off
Ex.
Greatness is transient, but a good
moral character endures as long as a
man keeps it in good rcpair.-Modern
Argo.
Pat, what are you about-sweeping
out the room ?" "No," answers Pat.
81 am sweeping out the dirt and leav-
ing the room. FIX.
just before Alphonso took to him
self queen, one of his courtiers want
ed to make Alphabet that he was A
B-C-cher Of her heart.-Ex.
1t was Des Cartes who said, beauti-
fully; "When any one gives me of
fence ! try to elevate my thoughts so
that the offence cannot reach me-"
Enough" says the philosopher, sis
Il little more than man has; but
economy is the problem of making
what Il man has suffice for his necess-
tiles.
Why is wine that has been bottled
for years like an unmarried lady of ad-
vanccd age? Because it is old made
and none the worse for it.-Wit and
Wisdom.
is sometimes question whether
the goat in the back yard or the oleo-
margarine OH the hotel table is the
stronger butter.-Springfeld (O.) Re
public
The Dayton Democrat has seen Il
horse in that place eat meat. We have
frequently seen horses run for stakes
here, with bit in their mouth.-Com-
mercial Bulletin.
Notwithstanding the defamation of
Prohibitionists, rubicund visaged
friend Of ours asserts that "sling" in
the hand is better than hand in a
sling.-Cambridgc Tribune.
A bass weighing twenty-nine pounds
was captured near Portsmouth the
other day. Perhaps it was double
bass.-Lowell Courier. Yes, one of
the deep sea fellows.-Salt Lake Tri-
bune.
The following announcement appear
ed recently in an English paper: "St
James church-On Sunday next the
afternoon service will commence at
halfpast three, and continue until fur
ther notice"
Rosa: 81 say, Tom, that odious
Al
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

Rosa: 81 say, Tom, that odious
Mrs. Mollycoddle doesn't go to town
with her new old husband so often as
she did, does she ?" Tom: Not she.
No occasion to look after him now.
She's insured his life Funny Folks.
"Well, Mary, how do you like your
new home in Vermont" "Well, mum,
we all like it but father, and the air is
too embracing for him, but under the
canister of heaven think there isn't a
more beautifuller place."-Win Wur-
tie.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

The following announcement appear
ed recently in an English paper: "St.
James church-On Sunday next the
afternoon service will commence at
halfpast three, and continue until fur
ther notice"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

Prof Bells wife is Il deaf mute
dumb bell.-Wm Wurtle.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

a bear story is not necessarily the
naked truth.-Modern Argo.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

An exchange calls Eli Perkins a
flower of journalism. He certainly
isn't lie-lac.-Lowell Courier
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

When do dogs most resemble cards
When they belong to a pack.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

When man is making love to Il
widow he always feels as if he had to
begin where the other fellow left off,
EX.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

A bass weighing twenty-nine pounds
was captured near Portsmouth the
other day. Perhaps it was double
bass.-Lowell Courier. Yes, one of
the deep sea fellows.-Salt Lake Tri-
bune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

The Dayton Democrat has seen a
horse in that place eat meat. We have
frequently seen horses run for stakes
here, with bit in their mouth.-Com.
mercial Bulletin.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

It's sometimes a question whether
the goat in the back yard or the oleo-
margarine OH the hotel table is the
stronger butter.-Springfeld (O.) Re-
public.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

Why is wine that has been bottled
for years like an unmarried lady of add
vanced age? Because it is old made
and none the worse for it.-Wit and
Wisdom.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

Notwithstanding the defamation OF
Prohibitionists, rubicund visaged
friend of ours asserts that "sling" in
the hand is better than hand in a
sling.-Cambridgc Tribune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

Greatness is transient, but good
moral character endurcs as long as a
man keeps it in good rcpair.-Modern
ArpO.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-10-05

Enough" says the philosopher, sis
a little more than man has; but
economy is the problem of making
what a man has suffice for his necess-
tiles.
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1881-04-11

un6 Oer- 8urt CAB Oas esfoIsloie Suden
auf.
ST CAB fi6 MGbe, @ineora's Softer
bonn Sabnbofe 5uriifaubetommen, aber
oas 8ltnoel nit Den Sba ulS fam ni1t
Wieber gum 8ori6ein. Septan0 mGBte cs
gebolt baben, meinte Der 8eamte, ooer es
mar in 8erluft geratben. Geaug, esNpar
un0 blteb neri6punoen.
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1881-04-11
g~y5chenfliche S0imois &faais-Beif,cne.
sic 1T uuwoh. ffe bat aopfidmersen."

,Sie lit uupobI, fie bat &opfi6mer3en."
sd ~bebauere, iie ftDren 3a miiiien; aber
id muB ite ipreben: SD babe ibr etfpas
NiGtiges su lagen."
@enl0c Wtinnten ipdter ftan0 er WiB
8ere gegcnaber, Die boil Grltaunen aHs
b6rte, mas Ser. 8urt ibr mtttbeilte.
SD bin nidt 9ugb Yierrepotnt's
Saterin," iagte iie, uoaB sic i'm bel mir
iu6en jolten. SD babe ibn lett geitern
Nbeno nidt msbr geiehen. @r lit ploBIib
for~teeaangen. tpofiir i1 ibm gar Mot oonfs
bar bin, 0enn er bat meine gan3e @eleHs
lAaIt geit0rt."
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1881-09-07
A Correction.
Editor Democrat

Editor Democrat
Sir: In your issue of August 3ist,
there appeared substantially the fol-
lowing statement:
"Mr. Pritchard, of the Baptist faith,
presided at the Methodist Church on
Sunday last" (Aug. 29th.)
Now, Mr. Editor. while this does no
one any great injustice, still it is some
what misleading, though unintention-
ally so of course. 1 beg leave, there
fore, to offer few words by way of
correction and information; and |
would say
/. am not Baptist in the modern
acceptaton of that term.
2. am a Baptist in its trne and
scriptnral import. But
3. To be more explicit. l have the
honor to be identified with religious
body who recognize no Master but
Christ the Son of God, who ackuowl-
edge no authority but the Bible, and
who demand no criterion or test but
faith in Christ and obedience to his
commands.
As to names they find
l. That in the New Testament the
whole brotherhood were designated
by the general terms of "the Church"
"the body of Christ, ETC."
2. That local congregations were
called "the churches" "the church at
Corinth," "the seven churches Of
ASIA" etc.
3. That Individually, they were
spoken of as 'brethren," "the saints"
'fthe disciples of Christ" "Christians"
etc. Now in this, as in all other things
religious. they wish to follow this In
spired Directory, feeling that in so
doing they cannot go far astray.
They lay stress upon no one name,
but are now generally spoken Of as
"the Disciples of Christ" or "Chris-
tians."
This people now number in the Uni
ted States, census 1880, about GOO, 900
besides respectable representation
in Canada, England. Australia, and
other countries. In this country they
have within their ranks many men in
high positions, prominent among
whom is the much respected and much
honored President, James A. Garfield
These things are not said by way OF
boasting. but as facts for information.
By giving this brief sketch place
in your paper, yon will confer great
favor. remain yours, very res'py,
D. w. PRITCHETT.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1881-09-07

PAss1NG EVENTS. --Messrs. f. V.
Weems and DR.. Hardy, of Bayou
Bouef}, were in Town on Saturday.
Mn. Chas. B. Stewart, will in fu
ture, have large quantities of ice -on
hand at the Palace Bar.
The genial countenance of Maj.
F. seip. of Bayou Rapides, was seen
on our streets the same day.
We had the pleasure Of friend,
Iy shake with Mr.. j. L. Conella, one
of our most successful planters and
warm-hearted gentleman, one day
this week.
Judge Gervais Baltic was in
Town on Saturday, looking the pic
ture Of good nature and an overflow
ing kindness of heart. May he be
spared yet many years of usefulness.
The Red River mail for which
the boats had yearly contract, is
now being carried overland, as the
boats are no longer able to navigate
the river. We saw the handsome
mail agent, Hodges, crossing the
ferry the other day, with ''muel"
in hack.
Mr.. Jos. H. Hynson, the ener-
getic and efficient President of the
Police Jury, was with us one day
last week.
ALREADY our people are availing
themselves Of the facilities for ira
vel up and down, furnished by our
railroad, which is now completed to
Coti'e and very nearly to Lecomte.
We met day or. two ago, Mr..
B. +. Brian, State Senator from the
Parishes of Catahoula, Grant and
VIM.
Mr.. I. C. Miller and his amiable
lady, who have been absent most OF
the Summer, visiting relatives in the
West, returned home on Saturday
last, and we were glad to see him 80
much improved.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1881-09-07

We are compelled to place q
great many Of our advertisements
this week in our extra, but will try
and remedy the same in our next
issue.
III would be good speculation,
it seems to US, for some of our mon
led men TO build neat, comfor table
and Inexpensive dwellings for rent,
on their vacant lots.
Gus. Gehr, the youngest bust
ness man in our Town, deserves
praise for his spirit of enterprise
displayed in supplying his custom
ers at all tunes with ice cold drinks.
III you want a good and reliable
Railway Time Keeper, manufactured
by the Waltham Watch Company,
60 to Ferguson and Schnack, who
have Gold and Silver Watches of all
styles and prices.
LIST Of unclaimed letters re-
naming in the Post Office, Alexan-
dria, Sept. 81, 1881: Sipio Brayton,
Vipgienezo Farrell, Miss Carrie Hig-
gins, Jacob Kahn, A. Kolsky, Louis
Henry, Frances W. Matter, Alex.
Mitchell, Henry W. Moreland, E. E..
Mclaughlin, S. c. Paul, Mrs. G..
Poussin, John Richardson, West
Smith, Mrs. Jane TiIman, w. l.
Waithouse, Lande WilIett. Parties
calling for the letters will please say
"adyertised."
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1881-09-07

4 king total of 1925 pounds, that
lsbout bale and a half. There is
It another place in the Parish that
n make the same boast. All of
is was done in one day, September
! (which is early for such large
Hunt to be picked clean and with
thrash at all.
Noun community, just now, is
j Mg a trying time in the way of
bal regret at the unfortunate
kilities of so many Executive
q. Our sterling Mayor, Hon.
I Is Andrews, Jr., Gov. Wilt and
Slent Garfield are all sadly ON
4 lex list and are, for tue time,
I Wcally disabled from discharg-
\ Gle powers and duties of their
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1881-09-07

b fondling her lily
III Was through her
|he lost her finger
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1881-09-07

oIL~Ss' AUG " SAbetS"os HO lSts' ~
returned to Town yesterday from =
three wseks sojourn with his family
at his country home With impaired
health that will prevent his attend
ing to his law business in the Court
that opened at Colfax on Monday, as
we'll as disable him FROM resuming
the duties of Mayor. We regret tue
illness of Mayor Andrews, and hope
that he will soon be "himself again"
1t is a matter Of qualification TO him
and others, however, that he fnds a
worthy substitute in Acting Mayor
McGimsey, who has been on duty
some time, and has merited general
appreciation by his efficiency and
promptness in enforcing peace and
order and a wholesome respect for
the law. We have no Guiteaus in
ia Louisiana that have come to The
surface rs yet, and Mayor Andrews
and Governor Wilt need not fear
1.-The fate Of President Garfield.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1881-02-25
RANDALL.

There was a pleasant surprise party
at Oscar Gibbs on the 18th.
Thomas Udell, Jr., has ceased to be
a miserable bachelor, and has become
q happy benedict.
Mrs. Hockney and her mother intend
to move into part of Oscar Gibbs
house to reside for the present.
Fordyce Benedict, who has been sick
over two weeks with typhoid pneu.
monia, is slo WY recovering.
DR.. Mcdonald, of Geneva Lake, is
attending Elmore Badger.
VIM. L. Dickerson, who came to Ran
dali over forty years ago, and resided
here over thirty-six years, is making
what he calls "my annual visit "
among his old friends in this vicinity.
AS town meeting approaches, the
court house question becomes a promi-
nent topic of discussion. There is no
doubt that a majority of the people are
opposed to the project at present, but
the number in its favor are growing
more numerous the longer the subject
| is pondered. Those opposed admit that
we need a better building, but they
base their objections on the fear that q
ring are agitating the matter, hoping to
feather their nests out of the money
raised also on the statement made By
one of the movers five or six years ago
that our present court house would last
fteen years at least. The Chairman
from this town next year will be pledg
ed to vote against the new court house
without doubt.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1881-02-25
ROLL OF HONOR.

Bristol No. 1l--W. J. Barnes, Teach
er. Third Month. Upper Form-Jen-
ME Fellows, Florence Fellows, Allie
Stannard, Efie Hill, Nettie King. Md
die F0gn1.-Alice Fellows, Jon. O'Hare.
Fourth Month. Upper Form. Jennie
Fellows, Florence Fellows, Allie STAN
nard, EAie Hill, Nettie King. Middle
Forns.-Derrick HollenbecE, John o.
Hare. Primary F0Tm-Laura Hill.
Pleasant Prairie No. 6-Laura Bears
ley, teacher. Second Month. Casper
Meyers, George Meyers, Augusta Cent?,
Matilda Cent?, ? Cent?. Third Month.
Amelia Peterson, Chris. Nelson, Kate
Nelson, Christene Nelson John Gras-
ser, Chris. Grasser.
Somers, No. 0--Maude Miller, teach
er. Frank Witschebe, Louie Wits
chebe, John LIGHTER, John Schwartz,
Eddie Schwartz, Charles Schwartz.
When school closes each teacher
should put the "circular On the grad
ing system" in the register and leave
it with the clerks for the use of the
next teacher. The circulars are not
the property of the teachers, but be.
long to the district. We cannot fur
nish circulars to all the teachers at the
beginning of each term, hence these
must be left in the district.
Roll of Honor for the month ending
Feb, 4. 1881, No. I, 6omers.-Allie
Strong, Gail Ozanne, Irving Ozanne,
Herbert Ozanne, Lawrence Ozanne,
Jessie Fink. G. CRoNK, Teacher.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1881-02-25
EDUCATIONAL.
IA. MAHoNEY. EDITOR
BRAN."H OUT.

1t is not in the history lessons alone
that the teacher 81 ould bring in out
side matter to make the lesson inter-
esting, but he may, and ought to, do
so in every exercise in school.
AS we remember our school days,
geography was a pretty dry study.
We were required to learn the name
and location of every city and village
in the United States, and Of every
river, creek, pond and slough-hole in
the known world, besides several i'm
aginary ones, which geographers had
placed on the map of Africa. OF
course the pupils studied the lesson to
please the teacher, and did not re.
member it for fifteen minutes after
the recitation. Once in a while there
was page or two thrown in, which
was devoted to the history of forms of
government of the country, or to the
customs, manners, form of dress, &c.
of the people. The class always
studied this and remembered it.
History and geography should be
taught together, to certain extent
Even in the study of local geography
local history may be brought in viii
good effect. If you doubt this, go lis
ten to a recitation by the primary geo
graphy class In the school at Grants
Corners, and be convinced. We dC
not teach enough physical with oul
political geography. We tell our pu
pills that the northern part of France
produces grain, and the southern par
grapes. olives, &c. Why not go on AMI
tell them why they cannot produc'
grapes in the north Of France? The,
would not remember it. says some one
But they aooasEd remember it, and re
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1881-02-25
BRISTOL ITEMS.
Keen out Of Tie snow drifts,

heep out OF the snow drifts.
Some Of our young folks started fol
the oyster supper at. Well, tC
make sure of some fun, they drove hel
slump into a snow drift. After hold
ing council on the situation, they
spread the buffalo robes for the young
ladies, and then took the sleigh to pieces
and carried it out. Having repaired
damages, they shook off the snow and
started for the oysters and had lots
more fun.
Mr.. Fl. Moore, of Racine, left fol
home on Saturday.
William Kingman has the measels
This is about their last call They have
been pretty impartial.
Mr. ]. G. Roberts gave a talk to the
people of Fox River, on Saturday, and
at Wilmot on Sunday. He reports a
full house at each place.
Mr.. Andrew Benedict, Of Waukegan,
has been visiting his son here, Mr.. A.
J. Benedict. He returned on Monday.
The famous Mountain Scout is to
give free exhibition of his skill with
the rife on Wednesday afternoon,
March Cd, at Bristol Station. offers He
to shoot at glass ball in the air, miss
it; then load and fire and break it be-
fore it reaches the ground. Will fire
and knock the ashes off your cigar
while you calmly hold it between your
teeth, without soaring you a bit.
Mr.. Philander Buck and his young
son graduated in measels ten years ago.
Mrs. Buck is taking a thorough course
Of measels now.
Mr.. Harmon Marsh is Frustrated
with paralysis of one side, and his con-
dition is considered critical. He is 81
years of age. His daughter, Mrs. George
Bosworth, of Grinnell, Iowa, arrived
here last week.
DR.. James B. Devlin, of Fond du Lac
county, made brief visit at his moth
er's last week, arriving on Thursday
and returning on Friday. We are glad
to learn the DR.. is succeeding admira-
bly, in his profession.
Rev. H. NJ. Corsbie gave his lecture
on the Reformation in England, on
Sunday evening, in the Congregational
church. The lecture was very inter-
esting and was calculated to awaken
a deep interest in the history of that
time, especially in the minds of the
young people who listened to it. The
subject of the next lecture is, p" Oliver
Cromwell" The date of the lecture is
not yet announced.
On Tuesday evening there was an
oyster supper at ]. NJ. Wards. In the
afternoon some snow fell and old
Boreas started up his bellows and par
italy covered up the track. A goodly
number turned out. A very pleasant
chat about the difficulty Of getting to
Wards. One gentleman said he left
his impression in the snow in two or
three places. One party lost the track
in field, and had some trouble to find
it again, ETC., etc. Well, the oysters and
chicken pie made us forget all our
trouble.
Nr. F. Shuart has gone up to Fort
Atkinson for holiday. Just so, Frank
ought to have a good time. He is a
boy that a mother may be proud to
own.
Mr.. Bishop, after a long visit at Mrs.
has returned to Union
Grove.
Mrs. Sackett, of Appleton, is visiting
her old home on the prairie.
Mr.. S. E. Tarbell is suffering from a
serious indispoSitiOn.
On Tuesday old Sol put out his
strength and pitched into the snow,
but Jack Frost bribed the north wind
and soon made things tight again.