Smyrna times., 1881-12-07
How They Trimmed His Hair.


Robert J. Burdette, the Howkeye man,
| thus writes to his paper from Soiux City,
Iowa.
The wild, ungoVernable passion barber
has for trimming your hair! On the Attn
of November was in Boston, thinking
about the lecture 1 was to deliver in the
evening, and so badly scared couldn't
remember the subject nor what it was
about. | went into fremont street In
stitute Of Facial Manipulation and Ton
sorial Decoration" and inquired for the
Professor who occupied the chair of Me-
di@val Shaving and Nineteenth Century
Shampoo. One of the Junior members of
the faculty, who was brushing an under
graduates coat, pointed me to a chair,
and climbed in. When the performance
was about concluded, the barber said to
me:
Have your hair trimmed, sir?"
Il believe not"
Needs it very badly, sir, he said; looks
very ragged"
| never argue with barber. l said
''all right, trim it little, but don't make
it any shorter"
He Immediately trimmed all the curl
out of it, and my hair naturally you
know, has very graceful curl to it. /
never discovered this myself till few
months ago, and then was very much
surprised. l discovered it by looking at
o lithOgraph
Well any how he trimmed it. On the
9th of November l was at Bath, Maine.
Again was shaved, and again the barber
implored me to let him trim my hair.
When / answered him that it had been
trimmed only two days before, he spite
fully asked where it was done. l told
him, and he gave expression to burst of
sarcastic laughter.
"Well, well, WE'LL" he said at last, $50
you let them trim your hair in Boston
Well, well. Now you look like one who
has been around the world enough to
know better than that"
Then he affected to examine a lock or
two very particularly, and sighed heavily.
Dear, dear" he said, II don't know
really as l could do any thing with that
hair or not, its too bad"
Well, his manner frightened me, and
told him to go ahead and trim it, but
please not make it any shorter
No, he said, oh no, it wasn't necessary
to cut it any shorter, it was really too
short now, but it did need trimming.
So he trimmed" it, and when faced
the Rockland audience that night looked
like prize-fghter.
In four days from that time was sit
ting in the chair of barber down in
New York state. He shaved me in CRATE
full silence, and then thoughtfully run his
fingers over my lonely hair
Trim this hair little, sir, straighten it
up about the edges?
1 meekly told him / had it trimmed
twice during the proceeding week, and
was afraid it was getting too short for
winter wear
Hes-he said he didn't know but it was
pretty short, but you didn't need to cut
it any shorter to trim it. 1t was in very
ragged shape at the ends
remained silent and obstinate, and he
asked me where had it trimmed last.
told him, and he burst into shout of
laughter, that made the windows rattle.
What's the matter, Jim ?" inquired an
assistant partner, down the room, holding
his patient in the chair by the nose. Jim
Htified his laughter and replied:
This gentleman had his hair trimmed
down in Maine" There was a general
burst of merriment all over the shop, and
the apprentice laid down the brush he
was washing and came over to see the
Maine cut that he might never forget it.
l surrendered. "Trim it little, groan-
ed, but in the name Of humanity don't cut
it any shorter"
No, the barber said he wouldn't make IL
q hairs breath shorter.
When left the shop, If hadn't been
for ears, my hat would have fallen
clear down TO my shoulders. When
reached the hotel every body started, and
couple of men got up and read hand
bill on the wall, description of convict
who had recently escaped from Sing Sing,
and looked from the bill to myself very
intently. That night several of the aud
fence drew revolvers as ] came out on the
platform. Amsterdam, New York. The
barber of the sleepy village, who, in the
interval Of his other duties acts az mayor
of the towh and edits the local paper,
. undertook to shave me with a piece OF
hoop iron he pulled out of his boot leg.
When / resisted he went out in the kitchen
and came back with a kitchen knife and
can opener and offered me my choice. j
selected the can opener, and he began the
massacre rersarkinQ fncidentlv that he