The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1881-02-04
CONGRESSIONAL HUMOR.
Horr. OF Michigan, ON the Democratic
PARTY

side OF this House have method Of OPP
posing and finding fault with every
thing that is existing to-day. | have
made little list of the things I have
listened to and heard you oppose on this
floor. You are opposed to national
banks. You are down on railroads.
You are down on all corporations. You
are no friend Of the bondholders. You
are opposed to the tariff. You want to
repeal the tax on whisky, and you
would Ike to take the revenue tax off of
tobacco. You are opposed to the i'm
provement Of our harbors. You are
opposed to the defense of our cities and
harbors. You want to reduce the army.
You want to cripple the navy. You
are opposed to home defenses. You are
opposed to all laws and subsidies
which would lead to ship building. and
which would benefit our shipping
on the high seas. You are dissatisfied
with the management of the Indian.af-
fairs; unhappy over our postal system;
you find fault with our Supreme Court;
abuse our public officials generally; and
you are opposed to fair election and
an honest count.
Now, what institutions are you in favor
of? l have tried to look up and see, but
have found nothing that you really seem
to unanimously favor except forgery,
fraud and free whisky. may be mis-
taken, but it is certainly an unfortunate
habit you have fallen into of placing
yourself in opposition to everything in
existence which contributes to the real
welfare Of the country.
The combined action OF men of means
and the institutions built up by organ
lied labor are the distinguishing marks
of our modern civilization. The pros
perity of the country depends largely
upon the success of all such under
takings.
Now, my young friend from Iowa
Mr.. Gillette says that the reason why
he joins in these complaints is because
there is vail continually coming up
from the people all over this land, a
wall of opposition to banks, bondhold-
ers and corporations. He says the peo-
pie are opposed to all interest, opposed
to those institutions which develop the
industries and resources of our great
country. Now, my friend will excuse
me if I say to him that [ think he is
mistaken. The wall in Iowa is not on
that account. The wailing party in that
State went from 48, 900 down to $4,000
in the last election. Right after the
Maine election my friend will not claim
that there was any wall among the Dem
ocrats in Iowa, for all over the country
they were the happiest fellows in the
land.
Some of us who knew that that cleo
ton in Maine was a simple Greenback
victory wondered at their making so
much fuss about it. But they became
so anxious for something to shout about.
got into such queer habit, that every
time Greenback pullet laid an egg DUR
ing the entire campaign they did all the
cackling.
In addition to this complaint of the
people we hear another thing They
tell us the reason we should oppose this
funding business is because the interest
in hundred years Or a thousand years
figures up fearfully. So it does Ag-
gregates are appalling things to shape
ones conduct by. Every man who eats
ordinarily takes up twenty-three whole
days in year. In an ordinary lifetime
that would consume four and half
years. Think Of man eating four and
a half years Still I always sit down
and take my lunch three times day,
Notwithstanding the appalling nature of
that aggregate. And again, every man
who lives out the period allotted to
many men sleeps twenty three years. If
you should let that thought take posses
sion of you you would never take anoth-
er nap. Interest accumulates still,
the manly way for this nation to do is to
pay its interest promptly until it can
discharge the principal.
[ say that this county believes in
some of the present institutions. We
submitted some of these questions to
the people last November. The bank
question, the currency question, the
tariff, resumption, were all in direct
issue in this campaign. The people
LC11elCIGe GuS4L FGIU1CU. iIGIC NdS noJ
then, nor has there since been, any such
complaint from the people as these men
would have us believe. After Maine
came Indiana Then there was I'M
doubtedly a wall on the part Of our
Democratic friends, but it was not on
account of the public debt Whether
the bonds should bear 3, 4, 5, or 6 per
cent. did not enter into their grief. It
was because they saw "the handwriting
on the wall" The 1874, 900 Republicans
in Iowa did not wall. The gentleman
will hardly claim that. After November
the situation became still more serious
to the Democrats; but it was not the
funding of the public debt that So both
cred them then. What worried them
after November was peculiar disease
that seemed to have taken possession of
some of their Leading men just before
the election, a sort Of color-b blindness,
so that they did not know the hand
writing of their own neighbors, lifelong
comrades. I know how to syn1pathize
with them. Ihave always been troubled
with that color blindness myself. I
could never tell certain shades of blue
from green, especially after dark, and
God knows it was dark enough for the
Democracy after Indiana to excuse some
blindness.
Vampire Bats of Brazil.
Probably no part of Brazil is more