Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1881-10-15
Mr spoopenayI.e and enc noe.

mas th~9 a ctt'tNhioi ~ Dt 4 Udl-
ger0us and ferOcious enemy.
Mr sPoopendyke and the Dog.
brooklyn Eagle
Look here, my DEAR said Mr..
Spoopendyke, as he led huge and
shaggy dog into his wife's room.
'Pye got Il dog a friend Of mine
gave me. What do you think OF
him?
Good gracious.' calculated Mrs.
Spoopendyke, mounting chair in
dlSmay. Is he mad p
/ No Mrs. Spoopendyke,' retorted
her husband, he not only isn't
mad, but he isn't step-ladder eli
Their, nor Il bird's-eye view. He's
a dog, and, il you don't get out OF
that chair, he'll probably bite your
legs off,
Mrs Spoopendyke sat down on
her feet and eyed the brute with
some trepidation.
Maybe he's got the hydropho-
bia,' she suggested, by way Of a
hearty welcome.
sP'raps he has, agreed Mr.. Spoop-
endyke; but if he has, he's got il
IN his pocket. Come here, doggee.
doggeee4tloggee p and Mr.. Spoop-
endyke Snapped his fingers persua-
sively.
why don't he come when you
call him?' asked Mrs. Spoopendyke,
deeply interested in the proceed
ings.
because you make such a dod.
gasted noise you scare him. ex-
planned Mr.. Sp0opendyke. Come,
doggee, doggee. doggee!'
I don't like that way his tongue
hangs out, objected Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke. 1t don't look NATURAL
Maybe you don't like the way
his tail hangs out, either. P'raps
you think that's artificial, too.
With your Information about dogs
you only need a slat bottom and a
broken hinge to be dog pound.
Keep quiet now, while I teach him
some tricks. Come here, doggee
Sit up, sir y
The dog stretched out his legs,
opened a mouth like folding bed
stead and growled.
what makes him do that p ask
ed Mrs. SpOopendyke, sitting on
the back Of chair with her feet in
the seat.
bod CAST it!.howled Mr.. Spoop-
endyke. who do you s'pose made
him do it? Think he works on a
wire? Got a notion he goes by
steam? He don't, / tell yo, he's
alive, and he does it because that's
the bent of his measly mind
What are We sitting up there for ?
Can't We see he don't like it? Now
sit still. Here doggee, good doggee,
sit up and begp and Mr.. SpoOpen-
dyke held up an admonitory fin
ger.
The dog eyed Mr.. Spoopendyke
with anything but an assuring
glance.
He's hungry suggested Mrs.
Spoopendyke. Dogs do like that
when they want to be taken down
in the yard and be fed
tOf course you know grumbled
Mr.. Spoopendyke. All you want
is perfect Ignorance on the part of
the police to be a dog fight. Got
anything in the house for him to
eat?'
There's some cold oyster stew
and piece of cuStaId pie
That's it = raved Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke. That's what's the matter
with the dog. He wants pie.
You've got it. You only need a
committee and a fight to be a
bench show. Where's the oysters
Don't you see the dog pining for
oysters? Haven't We got some
cold coffee? Give him a lemon IT,
stay his stomach, and Mr.. Spoop-
endyke jumped straight up in the
air with a howl and landed on the
dog.
The dog made for the open air
with a howl, and Mr.. Spoopendyke
gathered up twelve baskets of him.
self and locked after his prize.
Never mind, DEAR said Mrs.
Spoopendyke, soothinly, hell come
back
'If he does I'Il kill him. shouted
Mr.. SpOopendyke. See what you
have done. You made me lose my
dog and tear my trousers. Any
thing more about dogs you don't
know? Got any more intelligence
to impart about dogs? All you
want is a bucket of brandy around
your neck in a snOwstorm to be a
monk of St. Bernard with which
logical conclusion Mr.. Spoopendyke
began exploring his outlying dis
tricts for possible bites, while his
wifespeculated upon the salvation
of cold oysters and custard pie by
sudden and eminently satisfactory
disaffection of the dog.