Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1881-12-14

ton on the greasing of the said weapon of
seeing the injuries rapidly healed. This curious
impression is stated to prevail widely in Essex.
In Medieval Times.
| From the Brooklyn Eagle.
"S'boOd!" calculated Mr.. Caus Martius as
he sided out of bed and rubbed his eyes. BE
shrew me for liverkin, but the worthy Hora-
titus put not enough water to the proportion of
peel and hardware. and methnks have a head
upon me-"
Mr.. Martius CROPPED around and fell over a
| chair.
"S'death." CT. I'd his wife, sitting up in bed
and straightenin, the fillet that bound her hair.
''Thou art clums., my Caius! Hast built the
| fire."
'Certes, mott" replied Martius with sub
dued air. Hast thou put the plate of boiler
iron into the seat of my undergarnent? Hast
copper-fastened the heel of my sock? Hast
sewed a suspender button upon my steel small
clothes? Fire me no fire until thou hast patched
me my habiliments! Bravely will / appear at
the joust. if, peradventure mine tin shirt shall
be disclosed by thy carelesSnesS, for al the last
tourney did appear with mine hair sticking
| through the crown of mine helmet" and as his
complaints subsidized into grunts the noble Mar
titus did pull on his tattered arnor. the which
did reveal much of his anatomy.
"Chide me not, Caius" returned his wife,
g Bethink thee that thou bringst not home thy
clothing until four o'clock in the morning. and
then rail at me for not forging patches therefor!
| Six times this Ides thou hast been bOoZed and
! fain did split thy best steel breeches at the
knee and once. thou well rememberest thy
jerkin tail caught i'm the door of Claudius' house
and ripped unto thy collar band"
- But cOuldSt not thou have fixed the sleeve
Of my wrought iron Jacket" demanded Mar
thus. "Of a verify. thou at least couldst have
sewed the buttOnhOle thereof which now is fas-
tened with stick.'
81 had not rivets.'' retorted his wife. angrily,
NOR was there yet one scudi in the housed
Thou knOwest Martius. thou art not a good
provider. and since thou heldst but four sevens
against the ample jacks of the designing Greek
! there has not been postage stamp for house
hold duties. Beside the servant girl did quit"
"A murrain seize thee and thy girl" ex-
claimed Martius. impatiently. as he ran the four
teeth left in the comb through his hair "What
! hast thou done? Thou sttest by the easement
daily on the mash. whilst |. who earn the pOme-
granate and the lobscouse for the family must
needs meet mine peers in torn and ragged
armor. And if, perchance, the smiling gods
look not kindly through mine eyes upon the
jack pot thou makest it excuse for leaving me
| go ripped and rent among the masses Where's
my hat
"There is thine helmet on the bedpost," re-
! piled his wife, cOntemptuOusly land the shoe
horn bides beyond. ThOul't need it to get on
thine hat, Martins, for with the swelling of
| thine head and the battered dents some caitiff
hath bestowed upon thy plug thOult difficulty
have to make one tit the other"
| See, there the dent the envOus candidate FOR
! sheriff made" cried Martius with cleaning eyes
/ pointing out the various wounds that did bestrew
his crown gear. land here the constable did get
his work within. But when the centurion of the
Prsetorian Gyards did bust this miniature ravine
above the ear. seized the circumcised dog by
the throat and bit him in.haif like pie! Who's
been through my pockets"
''Well asked Caus Martius' returned his
wife. ''Twas did turn thine small clothes inside
out when thou lay snoring. One shekel and
four nickels found there and the shekes had
hole therein Mine gown hath passed beyond
the style and this mine hat is out of fashion too.
and yet between your politics aud jack pots. and
| am too compelled to go round locking like q
borrowed umbrella. Go to. Martius. and speak
no evil of my little job in snatching a few cents
that thou forgot'st to spend! Whom fghtest
thou to-day in the lists:'
''Brian De Bots Gilbert" answered Martius.
''if by any means | find blacksmith who will
trust me for nail or two. and lend to me
hammer. Come. get thee up and split the wood
or thou wilt have no pancakes for thine cmpti-
ness
And Martius winked upon himself and sailed
him out a cocktail to Obtain for he had hid a
scudi in the lining of his chilled iron vest for
morning restoration. And Mrs. Martius bounced
her forth. and from beneath the CARPET dragged
hundred dollar bond. and scanned the same
while she drew on her laced wrapper and Sara
tOga waves.
The OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES Young Man.
From the Philadelphia Times
One of the most conspicuous objects in GER
tain circles of society at the present time is the
''DOnt-you-knOw" young man. He ranks along
with the youth who carries his coat on his arm
and smokes cigarettes on the back platforms of
It.
greets you by remarking: This is fine day.
don't you know" His last salutation at night
is to the effect that he wishes you "a very good
evening, don't you know" He goes down on
Sd street just before nOon and tells his broker
to ''buy me some Wabash. don't you know" 1t
matters not where he goes, his ''dOn't you know
goes with him. He beams down upon his part
ner at the ball. and as he places his arm around
the butterfys waist, remarks. 'Tm very fond of
waltZing. don't you know" HebOws graciOusly
to his friend in the pew behind him after SER
vice is over on Sunday and thinks 1.-The sermon
was rather tedious. don't you know" When his
fond parents conclude it is about time he hOnOrs
society and some milliOnaires daughter by get
ting married, he breaches the matter to the girl
in question by informing her that Il love YOU,
don't you know"
Everybody knows him by his "don't you
KNOW and those who are sensible of the ludi-
crOus, as well as ridiculous, have his expression
for by-wOrd and get lots of fun out of him.
phrase very neat and very fashionable and
would not drop it ''fOr the world don't you
know" So he dons his stitched-back gloves.
twirls his natty little cane and starts out every
day to see what is ''going on down town, don't
you know" He is one of the features of the
times and must be recognized in any summary
of the oddities of humanity. The ''dOn't-yOu-
know" young man must be heard to be appre-
cated and he is sure to be appreciated in one
way or another, when he is heard. For he is
character, don't you know"
Where Key West Cigars are Made.
From the Key of the Gulf.
The population of Key West inside and out
side of the corporation boundaries. is variOusly
estimated at from twelve to sixteen thousand.
1t is asserted by persons well acquainted with
the place that it does not contain half dozen
families from the sou them states Of the Union,
and not twenty families from the northern states,
and that of the whole population, exclusive OF
the garrison and the United States officials,
there are not twenty-five unacclimated adults
About One-half of the population are supported
directlv or Indirectly by The trade in tobacco and