Morning journal and courier., 1881-01-01

Why Men Get Drunk on New Years.
 MT. George H. Butler says in the Washing ton Republic. We order these things diff ferentiy in Washington. Our begoars are aI- most invariably negroes. They use patoise or dialect peculiar to themselves, and say Boss, Is you got penny ?" or, II ain't had muffin to eat senee day fore yesterday be- ing unlike the French in their solicitations, at once inelegant and untruthfu1 And in the higher circles, as it is considered the pious caper to suffer from a surfeit of turkey cram berry sauce and 'tpie" on Thanksgiving day, New Years day. Of course no gentleman ever gets drunk. I mean they get unduly hashy with wine and towards evening begin to leave their gloves, hats, overcoats and canes in all sorts of odd places. These fashS ionable merry makers, who start out in the morning with visiting list never intend to get drunk, but you remember, Mir. Editor, what the old English Admiral called the three most beautiful things in nature-a beautiful woman in full dress, a ship in full sail and thoroughbred race horse. Now when after, say your tenth or twelfth call, at each of which lovely woman, sometimes a bevy of them. radiantly bright, glowing with deli cately shaded color, with alabaster shouI- ders, white arms. tapering fingers. expressive eyes and seductive speech, offer you glass ofbubbIng, sparkling what's fel- low got to do? Of course the conseuuence Is a headache the next morning but what human being with the blood and brains of A man wouldn't risk battery at canister range or fever ship under such an indictment? It was not my intention to write temperance lecture when set out, but sometimes blun- der into virtue. Ladies, especially those of you who are not mothers and wives, think of it! And then if you will start the men in drunkenness on the first day of the year, do not complain if they remain so the other tbr6n hundrad and vi 1ouc
 At the Stamp Window.
 Just before Il o'clock in the forenoon there were thirteen men and one woman at the stamp window of the postoffice. Most of the men had letters to post for the eastern trains The woman had something tied up in blue matchbox. She got there first and she held the position with her head ia the window and both elbows on the shelf.
 ''Is there such place in this country as Cleveland ?" she began.
 ''Oh, yes''
 ''Do you send mail there ?"
 'sYes"
 Well, a woman living next door asked me to mail this box for her. I guess its directed all right. She said it ought go to for cent.''
 Takes two cents,' said the clerk, after weighing it. Eff there's writing inside it will be twelve cents''
 ssMercy on me, how you do charge!"
 Here the thirteen men began to push up and hustle around and talk about one old delaying two dozen business let ters but the woman had lots of time.
 ''Then it will be two cents, eh ?''
 If there is no writing inside'
 ''Wen, there may be. I know she is a great hand to write She's sending some flower seed to her sister, and presume she has told her how to plant 'em.''
 1.-Two threes" called one of the crowd, as he tried to get to the window
 Hurry up !" cried another.
 t'There ought to be seperate window here for women l'' growled third
 Then it will take twelve cents ID she calm ly queried, as she fumbled around for her purse.
 ''Yes''
 ''Wel, I'd better pay it, guess
 From one pocket she took two coppers. From her reticule she took @ three-cent piece. From her purse she flashed out a nickel; and it was only after hunt of eighty seconds that she got the twelve cents toge- ther. She then consumed four minutes in putting on the stamps, asking where to post the box and wondering if there really was any writing inside But woman proposes and man disposes. Twenty thousand dollars wthals cf h.1si.s ess Ese. waiting for 8 twelve cent woman; and a tidal AAye suddenly took her away from the windoszexn sixty seconds the thirteen men hatr been essited on and gone their ways, and the woman fturned to the window handed in the box, andsaid: E'Them stamps are put on kind Q crooked, but it won't make any difference will it D? |