The Emporia weekly news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1881-1889, 1881-06-30
HERE AND THERE.

A medical scientist says that garter
will cure cramps. We infer from this
that the male sex enjoy u monopoly of
that ailment.
The tail of the new comet is said to be
1OO,OOO.OOO miles in length. 1t must
have been developed under the auspices
of 4 star route contractor.
A miser recently died Of enlargement
of the heart in the northern part of the
state. This paradOxical occurrence
could never have happened outside of
Kansas.
The news-mOngcrs at Washington
must be out of the city taking their sum-
mer vacation. Mr.. Blaine has not been
attacked with new ailment for three
whole days.
Another Ohio man has stepped to the
front. The French and British govern
ment have adopted for their armies the
Gardner gun, invented by w. Gardner,
of Toledo, Ohio.
Eli Perkins pales his Intellectual pro
biry before the editor of the New Or
leans Times, who is responsible for the
statement that a mule was sun-struck in
that city last week.
1.-THE great need of this country is a
president whose eldest son does not con-
tract matrimonial engagement as soon
as his father fairly warns the executive
| scat u.s. ]. Tflden.
A commission has been appointed in
Canada TO inquire into the working of
miIla and factories and ascertain if chill
dren are badly treated in any way after
hasiag been hired TO work. Canada is
EimbFoving.
Baaten Rnst: Now, honestly, do you
believe the report that Sarah Rernharlt
studied tho air and expression of hale
crazed women by going tn millinery
store and watching them try To select a
bOnnct?"
Professor King. the balloon man, is
preparing for voyage across the Allan.
tic. The rumOr that Sam Wood has
been chartered to furnish the gas for the
trip is probably a dodge to advertise the
Greenback party. .....
New York Exchange: Two thousand
dollars per day Is the price the people
are paying for the tedious jugglery show
at Albany. Any sleightOfhand man il
: the street would he more entertaining
. and equally useful for n thousand time
less money. ....... ..
PeddleIs of the Revised New Tesla
ment are said 10 do well enough in cit
: les and large villages, hut in the rura
districts any alteration Of the sacre,
: book is regarded so entirely in the ligh
fOf Proclamation that canvassers find i
necessary 70 sell playing cards and othc
4 novelties incident tn the book trade I
r come out even on their expenses.
II is very questionable whether Cover
!; nor Crittenden promoted his popularit
4 among his NOdaway county cOnst
Q tuents by respiting the Talbot boys unit
a the 22d of July. thus disappointing n
1 immense crowd which had assembled I
witness the hanging. The culture of III
o average MissOurian is of that high ordt
9 that when he rides twenty miles to fca.
d his eyes upon the eIevating spectacle {
i g public execution. the natural impuls
y is To resent any avoidable hitch in Il
4. published programme.
: The largest purchase of land CIV,
e made in the world by single perso
3 was that completed on Friday last, whs
:, Hamilton Desson, q prominent man
= fAc,urer of Philadelphia, took a deC
from the state of Florida for 1000, o.
acres situated north Of Lake Okeech
bec- The amount paid is not publishe
:, but it was supposed to be about tV
dollars an acre in cash. This enormOI
transaction has been in negotiate
:. several months. the land being und
! the control of the board of internal il
provement of the state of Florida. II
u tract is nearly as large as the entIre sta
. of New jersey, and the greater part
q il is susceptible OF cultivation
b. Parties who have failed TO provi
III themselves with caves and dug-Outs a
be respectfully referred TO the folIowiI
eP prophecy Of Vennor, the Canadi
er. weather prophet: AS the moon "
ay be at her inferior conjunction on 1
As 25th, and as the planets will lie but
lie few degrees out Of conjunction, / "
he adyise seamen to get their vessels in
he safe harbOrs until thai date be passG
It's Terrific gales, accompanied by hail "
blow from the east all along the All.