Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1881-12-14
A Wall.

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We hardly ever make trouble
where it is possible to avoid it, but
we feel that word or two is neces-
sary relative to the man who deliv-
ers coal. We never murnlur or re-
pir:e when coal goes up to where
you can't see it for weeks at time.
but we patiently 60 and get frag-
ments Of a neighbor's fence and
burn them until the price of coal is
more depressed. We do not get
mad when, after morgaging our
home and hypothecating our pay
for month in advance, we find that
our coal is nothing but stone quar-
ry with little chunks of slate and re-
fractory boulders Of blossom rock in
it. We just dig out what we can
make use of for fuel, and take the
rest to stone up the cellar and bang
the festive midnight cat.
| None Of these things make us low
er ourself by any outburst of tenn
per; but when the driver Of coal
wagon rides up on the scales and
has himself weighed so that we will
purchase him every time we want
load of fuel, and then comes into
the back yard and smahes down the
side gate, and drives over the chill
drens cart, breaks down the clothes
line, and upscts the ash barrel, and
breaks out the window of the coal
house, and puts two tons of coal on
top Of the coal shovel, and burles
the kindling nine feet deep, and kills
the cat, and winks at the hired girl.
and drives over the pet rooster, and
tries to climb Il shade tree with his
team, and then goes away and leaves
both gates open SO that there is
cold draft of air and eleven cows
passing through the yard, we can
not help showing that we are annoy
ed.
Sometimes we go home weary and
sad, but thinking how glad emile
and the laughter Of childhood, and
the warm and soothing collection of
high priced grub will greet us. and
with light and frolicsome step we
trip homeward, singing the silver of
some imported song.
We enter the broad avenue, flank
ed on either side by majestic elms,
give the password and enter the
glittering hall. AS we lay our over
coat across the cstruscan hat rack
and put our overshoes on the piano,
a soft voice thrills our whole being
with the announcement that an or
phaD steer is on the lawn walking
over the croquet grounds, eating the
tropical plants, and knocking over
the statuary.
We steal softly out of the donion
tower at the southern entrance, arm
ed to the teeth with a pressboard.
and the maddening pursuit begins.
We corner the Texas steer in the
lattice summer-house, and break the
pressboard over the dormor window
of his soul. At last he secs that
there is an undercurrent of indigna-
ton running through our nature,
and he takes most of the summer
house and goes round to the port
cullis. We race around after him
for two or three hours, get tangled
in the clothes line, wade through the
ash pile, fall over bust of Benia-
min Franklin and sit down in the
marble fountain.
When we get the steer out and
nail up the gate with some shingle
nails and a cross-eyed hatcllet, we
60 after some coal.
The shovel is under the coal pile,
so we can't use it until after the
coal is gone. The time you want
coal shovel most is not when you
are out Of coal, but when you 60 out
after dark and fall over an old ash
barrel and skin your elbows on the
place where you thought the shovel
was.
This is the time when nothing but
a coalshovel will squench the swear
full yearn.
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