The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1881-12-06
South Kentuckian.
PFICE. Bridge ST.. bet. Main and kirer
HOPKINSVlLLE KY.
EXCHANGE sc1NTI11ATIoNs.

Women ought to be naturally ex-
pert at making sandwiches. for they
never lack Ter tongue. Gruelle.
When the coal dealer studies for
the bar he begins with Coke and
ends with Little-ton.-Gruelle. iSil
q When two rival oyster-openers get
together there is likely to be an equi-
s kuock,shell storm, II Caseyville oou-
rier.
Nothing rifles railroad baggage men
more than to have an elephant aboard
they can't pitch his trunk about and
smash it. Dittoe. 81. .-w =. az. 5
ga prudent man concealeth HE
knowledge" says the proverb. The
editor Of the Danville Tribune must
be marvel Of prudencc.-[Gruelle
( A Micbigen man has deserted his
wife because she Is deaf and dumb.
Men little know when they have a
treasure in the house.-IC.-J.a This
s, and That. q Isl
Ia A church paper has an article head
ed. "'rhe great need of churches.
Every body knows the need Of most OF
them. It's religion Glasgow
Times. g4
Those spectators who bear the hog
market and cause shrinkage in prices,
are sometimes called anacondas, but
they are nothing more than boar-con-
strictors.--[ Glasgow Times.
When the farmer talks Of accepting
the gauge Of battle with themonopo-
-.r lists, he ought to he very sure it isn't
tx the niortgage.--[GlaSgow Times.
sss'~ a. Ben Buffers allusion to Essufs
cheating his brother with,a mess Of
pottage, reminds us Of Nj. Clay once
referring to Jacobs swindling Lemuel
with the striped rods.-[ Gruelle. =
.H4f A Harrodsburg lawyer perpeirsted
this enormous sentence: Gentlemen
Of the jury! My client should not be
s ? found lor simply being the barrier Of
. pint ofwhisky,-- Richmond Regis
ter 1 1913
No woman would be happy to be
the only woman in the world and have
all the men worship her. She would
.'i not be satisfied. She'd want another
woman or two to envy her. Erin
Tenn Review.
Another terrible warning to Ken
!, lucky parents. Another tried to 81
at the head of the steps until he
daughters beau left, but went to sleei
about 3 a. m, fell down and brok,
both legs and her neck.-Eowensborc
Post. ,a. 4..,.,...-
Meachani says Miss Mary Anderson
WILDE married on the 9th inst t,
Mr.. Theodore Carlton, native o
'ia't Louisville. And :he ungallant fellow
tails to wish her lnuch JOY and happi
.sr..ssv ,ness--And Ter son. Clarksvill
Chronicle. i.
y - Did you ever notice how GRACEFUL,
~ "a lady sits down on the floor at
skating rink? We saw it the othe
day, Before she sat down, she ra
against the writer and he sat dowr
DO you tumble? We did.-[Const
nationalist.
tits now ann ,unceil on authorit
of "an eminent physician" that it
not healthy to rise before eight o'cloc
in the morning. This applies only
i7 men. Wives, 1t is said, can rise ,
early as seven, and start the fire {
heretofore.-EMuray News. H.
-l bass II Mr.. Blaine were up about Wral
CELL Land, and Gen. Grant were the
too, aod!an iceberg mile high we
about to fall upon the gentleman frol
Maine, would Gen. Grant lasso tn
iceberg and tip'it the other way?-
[C.-J. This and That.
THE only peculiar present viii,
Governor Crittenden, received ct h
silver wedding was ferocious lookil
young bear from Southwest Missoul
This was doubtless to show him tn
trouble was bruin in that quarter
ieoman. t3 lt4 q NJ
: 54Jc 1t will hardly do for Jones to ple'
insanity and claim that a. streak
insanity always did run through Il
Jones family. That would cause pl
half of the world to look upon Il
other half with suspicion and shou
limo wise be rernitted.- Flemir
Gazette
ourjournalistic days are not MAJ
lin the land, and we have no vari
experience aud wide observ
tion to recount: but we think we Ike,
within the narrow path Of truth VIII
we declare that man, born of wom
and LIVING but few days, is We
fond Of seeing his name in print
Greensboro Post.
"A poor, misguided rat came to o
{ house by mistake few nights ag
and starved to death before it cou
get out again. 1t was found stiff al
cold in an outer room, with a paine
surprised sort Of a look about it. viii
its glazed eyes were despairingly fix
on an empty -four barrel. The !
didn't know newspaper man liv
there. or he might have been alive t
day. Madisonville Times.
The Glasgow Times says the 81
who saves all her kisses for her hu
band, and risks final rupture with h
sweetheart rather than compromi
her stand for prudence, will be Il
wife whose sweetness will not gro
stale with her husband, and who
honeymoon will never end. Yes, b
the HONEYMOON NAV never begin. al