davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1881-12-02
HUMOROUS.
rnle-Your wife's opinion.

Home rule-Your wife's opinion.
This is the rock of ages" said the
father, after rocking two hours and the
baby still awake.
"This is two two," as the man said
when his aesthetic wife presented him
with the second pair Of twins.
We always enjoy green6ack meetings,
when the meeting happens to occur
between a greenback and oursef-Der-
rick.
Norway has discovered that telegraph
lines scare the wolves away. They are
probably afraid of the extortionate
rates. Detroit Free Press
Pride's fall: eyes, . said Clara, "your
Maltese kitty is pretty enough, but he
can never come up to my bird" That
was all she knew about it. The kitty
did come up to her bird that very day
and it was all day with the bird.
at was a mighty mean market-man
who put the label "Please taste" on a
lump of Limburger cheese, shaped like
pound of butter. Ninety.nine women
left the market, feeling terribly sea-
sick, while the Tooth spat several times
and said she ''guessed she'd take two
pounds of that butter, as it was just the
thing for her boarders. "-1he Jndge.
He read in a newspaper paragraph
the statement that "The child is father
to the man." and straightway went a nd
asked his mother if that was tru @.
eyes, my son." she answered, .'it may
seem a little strange to you, but it's
true" "Well, mamma" responded the
inauisitive youth, "why is 1t II I'm
papa's father that he always lleks me
and [ never lick him ?"
The Philadelphia Ne'cs says pound
of feathers is as heavy as pound oil
lead. That depends. If pound OF
feathers were t1 fall from thitd-story
window and alight upon mans head,
and five minutes afterward pound ol
lead were to fall the same distance from
above and strike him on the same spot
he would be willing to swear that the
lead weighed ton more than th'
feathers. -No1rjstouR Herald
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1881-12-02
! 'FnR az LAIR SEX.
Sironz-1Iinded Women Among the Esaui-
mauN.

Sironz-lIinded Women Among the Esaui
manX.
7oung women. DIR. Dali tells us,
really quite fine looking, and of re-
markably good physique and mental
capacity, was observed to hold herself
! aloof from the Young men of the tribe
~ an unusual manner. Inquiry, first
OF others, aftcrward OF herself, brought
out the following reasons for the &c.
centricity. in effect she said she was
as strong as any of the young men not
one of them had ever been able to con
quer her in wrestling or other athletic
exercises, though it had more than once
been tried, sometimes by surprise and
with odds against her She could shoot
and hunt deer a well as any of them.
and make and set snares and nets. She
had her own gun, bought from the pro
ceeds OF her trapping. Sac despised
marriage, and did not desire to DO the
work of a wife; but preferred the work
winch custom among the EsquimauX
allots to the men. In short, she was d
womans rights female Of the most
advanced type When winter came
having made q convert OF a smaller and
less athletic damsel, the two set to work
with walrustusk picks and dug the
excavation in which they erected their
own house, which was of the usual type
of EsqGimaux houses walled and
rooted with drift wood covered with
turf. It was, however, as an additional
defense against unwished for prowling
males, divided into two rooms with a
very small and narrow door between
them, rc-i which lay some han " billets
of wood, to crack the scouce of n pos
sible intruder. Here our two amazons
lived, traded, and carried on their affairs
in defiance OF communal bonds and
public sentiment. The latter seemed
to be composed half Of disapproba'ion,
and half of enyious admiration while
all the young fellows in the village
busted themselves in concocting plans
against the outerprising palr. These
were too fully on the alert to be sur
prised and all efforts against their
peace were fruitless. When the deer
hunting season came, the two set or to
the mountains; and no sooner had they
departed, than disappointed lovers, and
outraged public sentiment" exempli-
fed in a mob, reduced their winter
quarters to q shapeless ruin. So far as
DIR. Dalls information goes, the follow
ing year the ladies' returned to the ordi-
nary ways Of the world, and gave mp
the unequal contest against a tytannicai
public opinion.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1881-12-02

"That prisoner has very smooth
countenance, said the judge to the
sheriff. yes, said the sheriff, he was
ironed Just before he was brought in "
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1881-12-02
Work.

There is no remedy for trouble equal
to hard work-labor that will tire you,
physically, to such an extent that You
must sleep. If you have met with
losses, you don't want to lie awake and
think about them. You want sleep
calm, sound sleep-and to eat your DIN
ner vi h an appetite. But you can't
nnless Won work.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1881-12-02

Never try to raise family without good
news paper, provided it contains the adver-
tisement Of DR.. Bulls Cough Syrup for this
valuable medicine is necessary to keep your
children in good health.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1881-12-02

Cited by the Washington Ind Ga:
zette is the fact that the colts in that To-
cality have a sort of Iameness in the
Joints. J. F. Myers cured his by anoint.
inc i with St. jacobs Oil.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
NEIaHHoRHoop NOTES.


Bishop Hill. Henry County, is on the de
cline.
The paper mill at Lyndon is to be EN-
| larged
The Hampton cornet band is to be uni
| formed.
Erie, in Whiteside county is to have a
new elevator
Diptheria prevails to some extent il
Pre- emption.
| The old settlers of Knox coanty are te
| 18th.
| The Peoria Democrat says that Herdit
| coaches are to be established in Peoria or
Main street and the Knoxville road.
The Peoria Freeman says the Illinois
river is getting low enough to interfere
with the movements of large boats.
Bureau County farmers have been troub
led with thieves who steal clothing and
small articles. Thus far there have been
no arrests.
The Decatur Recieso wants its military
company to compete for the 500 prize to
be awarded the best drilled company al
Bloomington in September.
The Geneseo Ne,os, says exultingtly
There is not mosquito in the town
ship, and window screens and doors have
become ornamental instead of useful.
A boy named Peterson, son of ]. r. Pc
terson, living near Milan, was cut in the
leg the other day while moving hay. The
limb was severely cut, but the injuries are
not dangerous.
Burglars raided three places near Buffa
10 Prairie on Saturday night. The plum
der obtained was small An attempt was
made to rob the house of Flavius j. Whit
ney, justice of the peace there, the same
evening, but failed.
The Galesburg Register tells of a rough
arrested there last week who resisted the
officers, and was only jailed when three
of the minions of the law had downed him.
The next morning S75 was imposed and
the thug whined for mercy.
The Burlington Gazette says that ex-
Governor Oglesby, of Illinois, who has
spent several months in Colorado, writes
to his friends that the mining richness of
that country has been greatly exaggerated.
and that many of the best mines now being
worked are at any time likely to be ex-
hausted.
Atlanta, Logan county, this state, is to
have a union fair of Logan, Dewitt, Nc
Lean and Tazewell counties, commencing
Sept. 6, and continuing one week. On
Wednesday, Sept. :, Senator David Davis
will be president of the day. Among the
features will be log cabin in which will
be exhibited curiosities and old time ar
ticles of interest to old settlers.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
INSANITY CASES.

Late yesterday afternoon two cases OF
insanity were tried before Judge Adams,
and in both a verdict of insanity given.
One was Lars J. Melburg, of Moline, who
became insane about four months ago,
caused by becoming overileated while at
work in Williams, White & Cos foundry
Moline. He was injured about seven
years ago by piece of timber falling on
him, and has been sick at times ever since,
though no evidence of insanity developed
until about four months ago He will be
taken to Jacksonville for treatment
Jonas August johnson, of Rock Island,
was first affected about five months ago,
and has been carefully watched ever since.
Only recently, however, have the sym
toms been at all alarming AMI then his
friends thought best to test his sanity,
He was ordered to Jacksonville for proper
care
This week three cases have been tried
and in each a verdict of insanity been
found. As it is the rule to bring back an
incurable in place of those sent, and as
these will go to the poor farm, the ques-
ton arises how to provide accommoda-
tons. Every day gives additional evidence
of the necessity for better facilities at the
poor farm, and it is merely question OF
time when the county will be forced to
the alternative of constructing new build
mos
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
A SHOW WITH TWENTY TRAINED
ELEPHLNTs.

Adam Forepaugh's Great Geological
Collection contains among its ark full OF
rare animals, twenty performing elephants.
OF this feature. and the show, the Detroit
Nescs remarks:
1.-THE twenty Elephants was another feat
ure in the evenings entertainment which ev-
erybody present viii long remember 1t is
impossible to conceive the perfect docility
and training of these intelligent animals.
They actually seemed to understand the
meaning of every gesture of their masters
and man9uvered with wonderful precision
and steadiness. Everything went off to
the satisfaction of all present. The me-
nagerie is the best we have ever seen, com
prising a very complete and varied zoolog-
ical collection; and we would advise any
of our readers who have not been able TO
be present last night. to be sure to at
tend this afternoon or this evening as this
is certainly one of the few opportunities
they win perhaps have for long time to
come, of enjoying something really IN
structiye, amusing, and, we my add, amaE-
ing.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
RAILWAYS
SarSaDariiliaa keseiyeHt.

Chronic Skin Diseases, Carries of the Bone, HUI
mors in the Blood, Scrofulous Diseases, Bad or Un
natural Habit OF Body, Syphilis ard Venereal, Fee
yer Sores, Chronic or Old Ulcers, Salt Rheum
Ricketts,, White Swelling, Sceld Head, Uterine Al
fections, CaRkers, Glandular Swellings, Nodes
Wasting aud Decay Of the Body, Pimpes and
Blotches Tumors, Dyspepsia, Kidney and Bladder
Diseases, Chronic Rheumafism and GoHt, Con
sumption, Gravel and Calculous Deposits, and va
rietles of the abIve complaints to which some
times given specious names
We assert that there is known remedy thai
possesses the curative power over these diseases
step by step, surely, from the foundation, and re-
stores the injured parts to their sound condition.
THE WASTES OF THE BODY ARE STOPPED AND HEAL
THY BLOOD Is SUPPLIED TO THE SYSTEM, from which
material is formed. This 1e the first correc-
tive power of Railways REsoLvENT.
In cases where the system has been salivated
and Mercury, Quicksilver, Corrosive Sublfnate
have accum rlated and become deposited in The
bones, joints, etc., causing carries of the bones,
ricketts, spinal curvaturee contortiOns, white swell
lings, varicose veins, ETC., the SARsAPARILLIAN
will resolve away those deposits and exterminate
the virus OF the disease from the system.
If those who taxing these medicines for the
cure OF Chronic Scrofulous or Syphilitic diseases
End their general health improving, their flesh and
weight increasing even keeping its own, il q
sure sigh that the is progressing In these
diseases the patient either gets bettor or worse
the virus of the disease is not inactiye not ar
rested and driven from the blOO IL Will spread aud
continue to undermine the constitu ion. As -oOn
as the SARsAPARILLIAN makes the pst.ant feel
better, every hour you Will grew better ard IN
CT ~Stein health, strength ana flesh.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
BREYlTrES

Hay is plenty.
Trinity Chapel has received a Sunday
School library.
large addition shortly.
The Rev. A. B. Allen conducted services
at the jail on Sunday last
Crackers have advanced one half cent q
pound caused by the advance in flour.
The Common Law docket for the Sep
TENDER term promises to be unusually full
F. w Shafer was fined s. and costs by
Justice Chopper, for boisterous conduct,
and paid.
The Viola is engaged for an excursion
to Linwood on Thursday night, which II.
B. butcher is getting up.
Coroner Morris had hardly returned to
Moline from Chicago, yesterday, when he
was notified of case calling for his atten-
ton at Cordora.
j. Van Erthal, for carrying concealed
weapons, was jailed in default of $500.
bail by Justice Chopper. This is the first
case under the new law
Capt. Whitney says Mansill's new boat
is made to climb a tree, run on land or wa
ter, and will probably be used for trips be-
tween here and Black Hawks tower
If you want trunk, go to J. w. Wirtel,
manufacturer of trunks, valises and trav-
cling bags, No. 220 Brady street, Daven-
port, Iowa. All kinds of repairing done
promptly 5-26d5m
Persons having books or papers for
which they have no use, or can spare, will
confer a favor by leaving them with the
Rev. A. B. Allen, at the Trinity rectory.
These are for use in missionary work.
The Board of Education has been COM
PEELED to provide better locks for the
school Louses, notably the one in the west
end, some maliciously disposed persons
having broken the gate hooks and injured
the property.
A tramp giving his name as Thompson,
was before Justice Chopper for making a
nuisance OF himself He was fined $40
and costs under the vagrant act, but the
penalty was suspended on promise to leave
town, which he did.
The hotel to be built in Omaha, Neb.
the contract to enclose which has been
awarded S. J. Collins, of this city, at
$50, GOO is being erected by the Kitchen
Bros, who are large owners of hotel prop
erty, having built hotels at number of
points in Iowa and Nebraska.
The Board of Health, in Moline, are
seriously troubled over the proper steps to
pursue with regard to the slaughter houses
of that town. They are satisfied by
abundant evidence that reform is necessary,
but whether the Board has the legal right
to do what is proposed is a problemn yet
to be solved
Last evening a man with a farmers
team with two ladies as passengers, made
the night hideous with his bowling, being
evidently boisterously drunk. He drove
his horses out 10th street and turned the
corner at 9th avenue, and then went west
The women held tight to the seat, while the
driver seemed utterly reckless of conse
quences.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09

On Sunday evening John Swiler, while
ont riding, had his buggy overthrown by
coming in collision with another vehicle,
and was thrown out, his head striking the
ground violently. His face was gashed in
several places, and over the eye the flesh
gouged out, and the membranes of the
skull was exposed. DIR. Gait dressed the
wounds and he was taken to the residence
of his brother-in-law, Mr. T. H. Thomas,
on Eighteenth street, where the best care is
given him. He is very weak and will be
laid up for a couple of weeks. The acct
dent was unavoidable and no one is blame,
amble
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
DEATHS CALL.

Thomas Y. Johnson, of Black Hawk
township, died this morning after an i'll
ness of two weeks, of typhus malarial
fever, superinduced by heat prostration
about three weeks ago. He was one OF
the wealthiest farmers in the county,
having amassed comfortable fortune and
is estimated to be worth $4,000 at his
death.
He was born in Ireland and came early
to this country settling in this county, and
was wide awake farmer. At his death
leaves wife and two children.
The funeral occurs tomorrow at the
Woods Episcopal Church, Pre- emption at
8 D. IN.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
SLIGHTLY INJURED.

Daniel Montgomery, of Edgington
while on his way to Rock Island, to day
was thrown from his wagon, and dragged
by the horses for some DISTANCE. He sus
tanned a number of bruises but fortunately
escaped without serious injury and was
able to resume hiss journey when the horses
got over their fright. The animals were
going along at natural gait, apparently
oblivious to fright and started so suddenly
as to give Mr.. Montgomery no opportunity
to check UP before they got start
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
A Lady Correspondent.

Mr. Editor-In recent issue of your
paper Daisy b. writes to know what tc
do when she has the 'sblues." Now,
have been troubled with that very unpleas
ant and essentially feminine complaint in
the past, and I am quite sure my experience
will help her. don't believe those indigo
feelings come because things don't &C
right around us, but because matters don't
go right within us. Every ladies under
stands this and knows the cause. Fol
years suffered terribly, and | now see
that / might have avoided it all had
known what do to-day. / tried taking
Warmers Safe Kidney and Liver
Cure as an experiment, and it did for me
more than / could ever have dreamed it
possible to do for any woman. l would
not be without it for the world, and earn
estly advise Daisy b. or and lady troubled
as she was, to use the means which / did
and l am sure that it viii have the same
effect
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
AN INSTRUMENTAL CONCERT.

On Wednesday night Biehrs band will
discourse music on the balcony of the
Rock Island House, and fine stereoptician
exhibition will be given by Mr.. w. E.
Crosley. agent of Forepaugh's great show.
Prof. Abt, will explain the various views,
which are said to be the finest collection
in the country. This exhibition is entirely
free, and is a forerunner of the great circus,
the only Forepaugh, which shows here on
Monday, August Is. The most promin-
ent acts in the circus will be reproduced in
the stereoptican exhibition and the enter
tainment be well worth seeing
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
NERVOUS DEBILITY.

VITAL WEAKNESS OR DEPRESSION weak
exhausted feeling, no energy or courage
the result of MENTAL oYER-woRK, lNDIs-
CRETIoNs OR ExCEssEs, or some drain upon
the system, is always cured by HUMPHREYS
HoMEoPATHIc SPECIFIC No. %. 1t tones
up and invigorates the system, dispels the
gloom and dependency, imparts strength
and energy,-stops the drain and rejuyen-
ates the entire man. Been used twenty
years with perfect success by thousands.
Sold by dealers Price, 81 90 per single
vial, or s5. 90 per package of five walls and
81. 90 vial of powder. Sent by mail on re-
ceipt of price. Address HUMPHREYS
HoMEopATHIc MEDICINE COMPANY, 100
Fulton Street, n. Y.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
LOCAL NEWS.
A Father in search of his
runaway Daughter.
Accidental Drowning of Milo
Ray at Cordova.
The usual grist of daily oc-
CurrenceS.
AFTER THE RUNAwAYs.

And old man about so years of age came
through Rock Island on the Chicago, Bur
lington & Quincy train last night, who was
on his way to st. Louis, in search of a
runaway daughter who recently married
against his wishes, and, with her husband,
skipped the country, taking along about
$1,000 of the old gentleman's money. He
says his daughter is not yet 10 years old,
is considered handsome, and until John
Raymond came along was perfectly con
tented He was an insurance agent and
by his plausible manner and easy way
soon won the girls affections, and pur
suaded her to elope, which she did on
Monday, Aug. 1, and her absence was not
discovered until the next day. The couple
were married, so that the father is not
worried in that respect, except that he
fears RAYMOND is scoundrel, who may
have another wife living somewhere, and
he blames him for the theft of 81 900 and
thinks but for his inducements the girl
would never have consented to run away.
The old man came from Malcolm, Iowa,
and has been tracking the couple for a
week He is confident they are in St.
Louis, and if the 81 900 is refunded there
will be no trouble, but unless it is there
viii be a case for the courts. The old gen
tleman seemed to take the matter very
cool, and exhibited more anxiety over the
loss of the money than of the elopement
of his daughter.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
DROWNED.

Information was received by Coroner
Morris last evening of the finding of tho
body of man near Cordova, this county.
and he started on the first train to hold an
inquest The testimony before the coro
ner's jury was to the effect that the mans
name was Milo Ray; that he was deck pas
-senger on the Diamond 10, trip nine. and
had fallen overheard. No blame attached
to anyone and the jury returned verdict
of accidental drowning. The man was
about 80 years old, and lived in Monowako,
Union county, Wisconsin. He had been
to Texas, and was on his way home.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09

Ross Mills. A. Z. Philleo. David Halves,
William ReIl and Palmer Stearns.
Thus is laid to rest one of the original
settlers of the county, man of great abil
ty, and who had much to do with shaping
the affairs of the then young village of
Rock Island He was an eccentric charac-
ter, in some respects, and had the faculty
of never forgetting names and faces.
Though he had not been resident of the
county for twenty years prior to his death,
few of the old settlers but remembered him
we'll
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
BARNUM.

Barnum's great show will exhibit in Rock
Island on the 2sth of next September.
The New York San thus speaks of the per
Torrance:
There were three rings in a row. The
place was in glare from score or more
of electric lights. Large elephants, drilled
like trained band, constructed themselves
into mammoth pyramid; ladies smiling,
1.-THE and shapely, flew upon the trapeze
and rode amid general breath-holding,
upon melted chargers-as did less inter
esting men-and all the leapers and tum-
blers at last jumped over all the horses and
all the elephants, and, amid thunders OF
applause, closed the show.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
Merchants, Read This.

To those subject to ills incident to the
vexations of business life, dyspepsia and
feeling of debility and fretfulness, we
say, without equivocation, take Simmons
Liver Regulator. This remedy is une-
qualed in the cure of piles, constipation,
bad breath, sick headache and bilious com
plants. The Regulator is free from any
injurious mercurial substance; not disa
greeable; can be taken at any time with
out interfering with business or pleasure
1t is gentle, safe and a good digester
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
a Cough, Cola or Sore Throat

should be stopped. Neglect frequently results in
an INcURABLE LUEG DISEASE OBJ CONSUMPTION.
BROWNS BRONCHIAL TROCHES do not dis
order the stomach like cough syrups and balsams
but ACT DIREorLY ON THE INFLAMED PARTS, al
laying irritation. give relief In ASTHMA, BRoscHI-
It's. CoUGHs, CATARRa. and the THROAT TRoUBELs
which SINGERS AND PUBLIC SPEAKERS are subject
TO- For thirty years Browns Bronchial Troches
have been recommended by physicians, and always
give perfect satisfaction. Having been tested by
wide and constant use for nearly an entire gener-
alton, thsy have attained well-merited rank among
the few staple remedies Of the age. Sold at 2tcts
hQx everywhere. dttattTsaw
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-09
DO Wise and Happy.

If you will stop all your extravagant and
wrong notions in doctoring yourself anC
families with expensive doctors or humbug
cure-alls, that do harm always, and use
only natures simple remedies for all your
ailments, you will be wise, well and happy
and save great expense The greatest
remedy for this, the great, wise AMI good
will tell you. is Hop Bitters-rely on it.
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