Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1881-06-11
Celestial HOrsemanshIp.

Bill Nye
When a Chinaman does most any
thing in his own peculiar oriental
style, it is pretty apt to attract atten-
ton but when he gets on a bucking
bronco with the cheerful assurance Of
a man who understands his business,
and has been eonversant with the
ways Of the bronco for over two thous-
and years, the great surging mass Of
humanity ceases to surge, and stands
with bated breath and watches the
exhibition with ~unfagging interest,
The Cbinaman does not grab the bit
ofthe bronco and yank it around an
til the noble steed can see thirteen
new and peculiar kinds of fireworks
or kick him in the stomach and knock
his ribs loose, or swear at him until
the armament gets loose and begins
TO roll together ike a scroll, but he
does his hair up in an oriental wad be-
hind and jabs a big hair pin into it
and smiles, says something's like what
aGuinea hen would say if she got ex-
cited and tried to reaept one Bjoernst-
jerne Bjoerson's poems backwards in
his native tongue.
Then he gets on the wrong side
and slides into the saddle, making a
remark as though something inside Of
him had broken loose, and the grand
difficulty begins.
At first the bronco seemed surprised
and temporarily ratified Intellectually
and he stands idly in the sunlight and
allows his metal equilibrium to wabble
back into the place while the China
man makes some observations that
sound like the distinct melody Of a
Hancock club going home at2 o'clock
in the morning, and all talking at one
and the same time.
By and by the bronco shoots athwarl
the sunny sky like a thing of life, and
comes down with all his legs in a clus.
ter like a bunch Of asparagus, and
with a great deal offorce and expires.
sion.
This movement throws the China.
mans liver into the northwest corner
Of the thorax and his upper left hand
deuo essinlo into the middle Of mex
week, but he does not complain. HI
opens his mouth and breathes in all
the atmosphere that the rest of The
universe "a spare, and readjusting hi
shirt tail so that it will have the cor.
rect inclination toward the horizon
he gently tickles the bronco on the
starboard quarters with the cork sole
OF his corpulent shoe This mirth
provoking movement throws the bron.
co into the widest hyt% terics, aud fol
twenty minutes the spectators DON
see anything very distinctly. The au
tumn sunlight seems to be mixed VI
with the blonde bronco, and the soft
ened haze Of October seems fraugh
with pale blue shirt tail and disturbe,
ChinamaR, moving in an irregular or
bit, and occasionally throwing off me
teoric articles Of apparel and his pre-
historic chunks of ingeous p~rofanit,
Of the vintage of Contucius, marked
b. G. 1860.
When the sky clears up u little tn
Chinaman's hair has come down, an,
hangs in wild profusion about hi
olive features. The hem Of his shir
flap is seer to be very much frayec
like an American flag that has snappe
in the breeze for thirteen weeks. H
finds also that be has telescoped hi
spinal column and jammed two rib
through the right superior duplel
and he has two or three vertebr;
floating about through his system tina
be didn't know what to do with. Th
casual observer can see the Chinama
in a robust ruin, while the bronco j
still in a good state of preservation.
But the closing scene is still {
come. The bronco summons all hi
latent energy, and humping his bac.
up into the exhiliarating atmosphere
he shoots forward with great earnest
ness and the most reckless abandon
and when he once more bisects tn
earth's orbit and jabs his feet into th
trembling earth, a shapeless mass O
brocaded silk and course black hair
and taper nails, and celestial shirt tai
and 0olong profanity and ~disorganize,
Chinese remains, and shattered ori
entail shirt destroyer, comes down an
parently from the New Jerusalem
and the coroner goes out on the stree
to get six good men and q chemist
and they ~analyze the collection.
They reports that the deceased cam
to his death by reason of conclusion
supposed TO have been induced by hi
fall from the outer battlements Of tn
sweet bye and bye.