Arizona weekly enterprise., 1881-12-17
PLE4SANTRIES.
ANECDOTES of great men all remind us # is aasv to lia

ANECDOTES of great men all remind us it is easy to lie.
 THERE is "tied" in the affairs of men that lends on to baby carriages.
 Asa rule the flower of the family does nothing toward providing the daily bread.
 WESTERN settler Overwhelmed by spring freshet)-" House gone Stock gone Barn gone Guess kin stand it, though old woman gone, too."
 'sIT is harder to get ahead in this world," said Ciorinda's young man as her father assisted him out of the door with his boot, than it is to get foot"
 A LITTLE girl, being asked on the first day of school how she liked her new teacher, replied: 1T don't like her, she is just as saucy to me as my mother"
 ssAND now, Lord. what shall say 2" were the words of the minister at the close e lon. Say Amen, said softly little enefu5 of the congre- gation..
 BRILLIANT and impulsive people" said lecturer on physlognomy, "hase black eyes or, if they don't have em, they're apt to get 'em If they're too ln- pulsiye."
 MOTHER reading "And every morn ing and evening Elijah was fed by the ravns, who brought him bread to eat" Lucy, aged four: ''And was the bread buttered, mother ?
 SAID Fogg, smarting under the hands of the barber, l" I wish you were where 1 your razor is." "Where is that?' asked the tonsorial artist. "Under- ground" replied Fogg, with snap. l HE wears penny flower in his coat, Ladida,
 And penny paper collar round his throat, LGdida;
 In his hands penny stick,
 In his tooth penny pick,
 Not penny in his pocket,
 "MABE1, why, you dear little girl, :" exclaimed her grandpa, seeing his little granddaughter with her head tied up, "have you got the headache ?" Mo-" she answered, sweetIy, Ise dot spit turl."
 THE cool-headed fellow is the bald headed fellow. He IS modest, too, for he never puts on hairs. He is brilliant man, too, for he always shows a shining front His genius will live after him, for there is no dyeing there. A POET chimes, "I do not dread an altered heart" There's where most people will differ with him. To have one's heart altered-a piece chipped of here, and another there, so that 1t will be altered in form in the shape of tri- angle-is very painful operation, and it is to be dreaded every time.
 LITTLE Bertha, who lives in Cam bridge, visited her aunt, who resides ln Roxbury. Upon her return she was asked if she said her prayers when she was at auntie's. With wide-eyed as- tonishment at such question the little one replied: Why, mamma, Dod don t live in Roxbury."
 AN intelligent witness was on the stand in a Deadwood lawsuit, and the lawyer asked him: |" Do you know Jen- nie Drysdale ?" "Yes, sir" Whats her reputation for truth and vera:ity ?' "Well, her reputation for truth is good, but can't say as much for her repuIa- ton for yeraclty. I am afraid 1t isn't first class.
 Two GALVESTON gentlemen were talk ing about certain applicant for Fed eral patronage, now in Washington city.
 How is it that he never got an officer Born incapacity is the reason. "Whew! So that's 1t. Born in Ca pacity, was he? I never heard of the town, but I reckon it is not in Ohio. ''- GalUesto'a Ne,os. , THAT was witty man who, being de tained in snow blockade, penned . dispatch which ran thus: ''My deal
 sir, have every motive for visiting zszz except locomotive. So was the othe|
 who, under similar circumstances, tdI4 graphed to his firm in New York :<<1
 shall not be in the office to day, z5 have not got home yesterday. "-zssz z tord Post.