The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1881-08-04

NUMBER 80
Before I had time to answer, Mr..
Cheeseman came up to us, rubbing his
hands with hospitable ferver.
Pitch in, now, and eat like you was at
home. The heft of the vittles amt teched
yet, and on he went, chuckling with glee
to see how Hammer Mari's pies were rel
ished.
After Abe had eaten another pie or two,
he took brown paper parcel from his coat !
pocket. This paper contained peppermint
drops and most atrocious lozenges, made
Of plaster Of paris, I think; but the beauty
Of the latter were the sentences printed on
them in red letters. These sentences
were all Of an amatory nature, and Abe
selected those with the tenderest senti- .
ments and gave them to me with meaning
looks The pies had probably warmed his
heart. One lozenge had inscribed on it:
II you love me as love you,
No knife shall cut our love in two"
Amt that 500" he asked, hitching his
chair little nearer me. An answer from
me was unnecessary, for he handed me
another abomination that read:
ssWill you be my true ard loving wife?'
To live with me all the days Of your life?"
Now, could any one heart fail to be
touchedby the beauty Of that couplet? Mr..
Crockett thought not. He hitched his chair
still closer and leaned over me-
4 am in dead earnest about that" said
he. When first seen you tonight, I
says to myself, says, there's the gall for
me, allus would. have the best in the mar
ket. Now amt such bad looking fellow
o. II I'M WOO
the bank that uncle Eben left me; and pap
says whenever get sphced he'll GIN me a
piece Of land Off his'n. and nice yoke O
oxen. I lowed your folks would give you
a settin out in bedclothes, dishes and SIGH
truck, won't they? Come now what dye
say?"
I was struck speeches. at this unexpect-
ed proposal. I could not find words to re-
ply. Mr. Crockett evidently thought silence
gave consent; and think he would have
attempted the affectonate in another min
ute if Jim had not come to the rescue.
He was not pleased with the events Of
the evening. Clorinda Bakers gorgeous
toilet had not been without effect on him.
And as Abe had been her escort, and was
now playing the devoted to me, he thought
it was too much. He stalked over to us
| and said: Abe Crockett you are playin
smash keepin' this lady over here in the
corner. know she was tired listening TO-
your CAB half an hour ago.
I rose quietly to go with Jim, but Mr..
Crockett threw himself in dramatic atti--
tude, and said to Jim: I reckon you'll let
her take her choice about goin' or stagin,
won't your" And turning to me with the
most insinuating smile, Nov you choose
betwixt us, and don't you be afeared. I
amt goin' to low nobody to hurt ye.' But
that choice I made was to walk hastily away
with Jim. did not even dare to glance at
Abe.
Once safely across the room, beside
Sary Jane, breathed again. Robinson
was calling, After supper polky; trot out
your partners for an after-supper polky."
At the same time he walked toward me with
an air of
''See the conquering hero comes, "
violin in hand.
Il 'spose you'll be willin' to pace through
This polky with me, said he, with the con
hdence OF man who cannot be refused. I
was Just beginning to make some desperate.
kind of excuse, when Abe Crockett put i'm
an appearance.
I think this yer lady would prefer dane
ing with me, )" he said very stifiy.
The dickens you do?" Robinson re-
piled. You air purity fgger for a polky:
you air SO. Wish had buzzom- pin and
a red cravat; maybe could shine in society.
then" This last remark was addressed to
the crowd, and delivered with a KNOWING
wink to the crowd.
| Don't you give me none of your sass.
Jake Robinson, was Abe's elegant reioin-
der, @.or I'll break this old fiddle over your
head.
This was too much for Robinson. He
Informed Abe that he could whip him and
his paternal relative Commonly called dad
dy) both, with his left hand. And his
nanny too. And if Mr.. Robinson had
ever been SO unfortunate as to have heard
| Pinafore" he would undoubtedly have adj
ded. his cousins and his aunts." But as
it was he contented himself With the men
| ton of a few of his male relatives.
| Can describe what followed?
Can tell how the belligerent gentlemen
went outside; a ring was formed coats tax
en- off and pugilistic demonstrations begun?
can never, never forget how Abe look
cd after few skillful passes made by the
fists of Robinson. The 4buzzum- pin' was
smashed, the cravat was torn, the curl
taken out of the elaborate hair structure on
top of his head. But that was not all. His
eyes were "bunged" and his nose was bleed
ing.
! + !.
At this stage of proceedings Jake paused
for minute and sarcastically asked Abe.
Wouldn't ye like to stop and dance the
polky awhile?" And then went right on Is
say hewas now going to throw him in the
mud and sit down on him. But the crowd
interfered at this juncture, and Abe was led
away by commissioning friends. The ride
home was dismal one. I felt I was "a
disgrace, though Sary Jane tried to console
me by saying, Some of the boys allus gifts
| in . russell and breaks up the dances"
left the place few days afterwards, and
never saw Mr.. Crockett again.
But heard he had married Hammer Mari.
won by her superior pie abilities, no doubt.
Alas! When think I might have made pies
for him, am tempted to make that hack
neyed quotation:
.'Of all sad words o. tongue or pen.
The saddest are these, It might have BEEN"
Cottages as Incentives to Matrimony.
EranvrA $1,oA SO o.