The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1881-03-03
PRICE 3 CENTS.
brooklyn Eagle.l
The Last Cabinet Maker.

"Does this print shop pay for information"
inquired hard looking individual, as he
staggered into the city editors room yester-
day afternoon.
"If it's worth anything" replied that func-
tionary. what have you got?'
I'm just from Mentor" said the stranger.
Started from there Monday, and arrived to-
| day Got showed in up to my waist, but L
pulled through, walked all the way. Me and
Garfield had long talk about the cabinet and
I've got the inside facts. What's it worth?"
'It's worth good deal, If it's authentic"
replied the city editor. "What did you find
out?"
II got the whole business. Garfield isn't go
ing to have anybody but newspaper men
around him. Smart man, that Garfield He is
going to make you Secretary of State, and Mu-
rat Halstead Secretary of War. How's that
strike you? What's that worth?'
"Halstead is all right but I'm Democrat
"Just what Garfield said; says he: The city
editor of the Eagle is a Democrat He comes
high but must have him. Obi he knows
your talent. What price do you put on that in
formation?"
"Who compose the rest of the Cabinet?"
"Well, there's you and Halstead, and Dea-
con Richard Smith. Mr.. Smith is to be Secre-
tary of the Navy. Then there's James Gordon
Bennett as Secretary of the Interior Sam
Bowles is to be Attorney General and Harper
Brothers are to have the Post Office portfolio.
tell you Garfield is going to have cabinet
for green's. Says he to me, says he, SAM my
name is Sam, says he, Sam, il that cabinet
don't make 'em hustle around, they can kick
me on the ear How much do get for this
ntelligence?"
'But I'd rather have the mission to Eng
land" objected the editor
That's what Garfield said. Says he Sam,
I'm afraid the Eagle man will kick for the
English mission, but want him here. Use
your influence with him, Sam. Tell him he
must take the State Department. and you
must do it, stranger. 1t won't do for you to
bust the slate. Grant has been trying to get
Charles A. Dana into the job, but me and Gar
field preferred you"
What are you going to do with Mr.. Dana?"
"We are going to put him on the Supreme
Court Bench. Fact! Don't breathe It, but
we're going to do it to keep Gould quiet.
Says Garfield to me, says he, Sam, if these ap-
pointments don't suit the Eagle man, let him
change 'em. See him, Sam, if you have to
run all the way. Think this is worth hun
dred dollars?"
What becomes of Mr.. .,Conkling?"
There's the best of it. Garfield is going to
and then he resigns in Conklings favor That
makes Conkling President, but he won't ac-
cept unless you take the State Department.
Conkling is firm in that. Says he to Garfield
says he, Tell Sam 1t must be fixed, and he
meant it." u M
''What does Grant get?" .....
"That troubled me and Garfield good deal,
but We fixed it. Grant is to be inspector Of
ministers abroad. Has gunboat to himself
and good time. But he says he can't take it
unless you are Secretary of State. How much
do get for this?''
Nothing" replied the city editor. "You
just walk back to Garfield and tell him re-
sign. Pm too busy. Much obliged, but can't
attend to it,
"But don't get any pay for my informa.
tion?" asked the cabinet maker.
mot cent. Just go to the other appoint
ees and If they accept they will probably re-
ward you for your exertions."
But haven't got any money to cross the
river" objected the tramp. al
Then stay on this side," suggested the irate
city editor.
Won't Won't, you put up quarter to be Secretary
mot a cent Get out of here, quick, or I'll
make hole in the side of the building with
you."
"Derndest man ever saw" muttered the
tramp, as he plowed down stairs. Il give him
information no one else can get and he don't
want to put up. Reckon he amt been re-
porter long. I'll just strike him off and put In
some other fellow what can appreciate high
honors.' -.r. ..-
And he leaned up against the wall and
scratched the Eagle Which he had spelled
Egull, off his list.