National Republican., 1881-10-22
A COUNTRY GIRL
WHO WAS IN WASHINGTON JULY 2.
Her Experiences Upon Visit to the Country After
uard-The Questions Asked Her and the Re
plics-Thc Innocence Of Bucolie
Life-Origlnal Ideas.

Everybody advised me to get out of
Washington during August anyway, as, not being
thoroughly acclimated, there was danger of my
falling victim to malaria. l finally acquiesced
In their Judgment, perhaps partially influenced by
desire 10 again hear the ripple OF the waters OF
Lake Erie and feel the hearty shake OF well
come from honest horny-handed farmers and
their wives, who lived in blessed Ignorance of all
the "ways that are dark" Of metropolitan life. l
wonder why those same good women think II
necessary for salvation to comb their hair tight
little knots on the back. The benign editor OF
THE REPUBLICAN asked me TO write
watering. place notes. / virtuously re-
piled that did not do such things and palm
OF imaginary scenes on IN unsuspecting public.
l thought that a good way 10 avoid confesslng my
Ignorance Of life at Long Branch, Cape May, or
Saratoga. Afierward concluded that If oil the
letters were written away from the scene might
ns well try as any one else so I started a sensa-
tional letter concerning count rescuing daugh-
ter of Senator Ferry from dangerous undercur-
rent at Saratoga My sister-who is old fashioned
enough to remember her geography-said Saratoga
wasn't on the sen coast and l saw in the papers
that Senator Ferry was bachelor, so tore up the
article, congratulating myself on my escape from n
libel suit. Ii did not have watering place expe-
rlence had n change In small talk from the gen.
eTNl expression OH meeting an OF
"Wnrm day, isn't it?"
l stopped over for few days In n small city,
where had some friends. Soon amer my arrival
the lady remarked
81 suppose they had exciting times In Washing
ton when Garfield was shotY'
"Ycs," said: all business was virtually sus-
| pended for the rest of the day" and went on to
tell what did and saw.
| Shortly her husband came in, welcomed me
and said:
81 suppose they had exciting times in Washing
ton when Garfield was shot2"
| ii admitted the fact and repeated my expert
ences. The next evening we were out for dinner.
| The host, great hearty man, took my hand In his
| in a visit like grasp and said:
"1 suppose they had exciting times In Washing
| ton when Garfield was shOt?'
started to explain when we were interrupted
by other guests. was introduced as Miss Mallett
| of Washington.
"Oh, suppose they had exciti ng times In Wash
| ington when Garfield was shot2'
Launched into particulars ~ be interrupted by
fresh arrivals and repetition of:
81 suppose they had exciting times In Washing.
ton when Garfield wus shotf"
never finished the account of the events of july
2. There wasn't time enough between times 4
kept up the whole seven weeks was gone. pre-
sumo met 525 people, and all but four said:
81 suppose they hud exciting times In Washing
| ton whe Garfield was shot2"
IL was a little variety to have poor old lame
| Jackson stutter out:
81 sp-p.pose they had exciting times in Wash
| ington when G.G- q -arield was shot?"
Ny grandmother, too, gave me n little diversity
by asking me If had been In TO see the Presiden
| since he was shot. She evidently thought l wa
| OH intimate terms at the White House. Poor ole
lady, she Is over eighty, and so blind she can
read the papers and so deaf she can't hear then
read, so she is not so much to blame She didn'
| know of the coup dedt of The doctors and sup
| pose thinks Washington Is a little hamlet and tha
| the neighbors took turns In sitting up with thu
wounded chief Her heart Is all right, for wheI
she heard he was shot she hung her Grape veil OF
the door.knob to testify her sorrow. It was
| little embarrassing for the family to have peopl
creeping around the back door to ask when th
| funeral would be and IL she didn't die awfu
sudden.
| One Of the neighbors, jovial man, always read!
| with his Jokes or to hitch up" and go visitin,
| came to see me one day. He talked around OF
| this subject and on that, and finally solved tn
mystery of his visit by asking If had heard any
thing said about his pension down here, and If
| knew how It was coming on. was sorry to con
fcss ignorance, although could scarcely expeC
to do otherwise. was sorry, for should hay
deemed 1t privilege TO have furnished any In
formation to free, liberal son of the soil-one O
those who does not exact pound of flesh 70
every favor. II brings a breezy satisfaction of It
own. Should any Of them take advantage G
cheap rates to see the sights of the National Capi
tai should bo glad to do 1t and enjoy thei
original ideas of things rs much as they and b
unused, not Mortified, even If, like some tourist
on Monday, they should take the Supreme Coul
| room for an elevator. MALLETT.