davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1881-09-16
MIR. SPOOPENDYKE.
He shows Mrs. 3. His Superior
knowledge or Hanging Pictures.


balancing himself wayerlingly on a
dining room chair, "all you've got to
do now is TO get your pictures ready
and I'll show you how to hang the
things.n
"It's awful sweet Of you, pet,n said
Mrs. Spoopendyke, alternately rubbing
the frame Of very hectic chrome and
sucking the thumb she had been ham
mering for the last twenty minutes.
"lt's awful sweet and thoughtful OF
you, dear, to offer your assistance at
this tine, for | do believe | never
would have got nail driven into that
stupid wall"
"Of course you wouldn't, my dearw
laughed Mr.. Spoopendyke. "Wno
ever saw a woman that could drive a
nail? You couldn't drive galvanized
carpet tack in 'leven pound bladder
of putty. And, speaking of driving
nails, I'd like to know if you're ever
going to hand up that hammer, or
meat FOUNDER, or whatever you have
been using. Think | can drive nails
with my elbow"
"lt's the stove hook, love-" said Mrs
Spoopendyke meekly, handing him a
notwithstanding implement, with
wooden handle at one end and the un-
der jaw of shoemaker's plyers at the
other"
"Oh, it's stove hook, is it," said
Mr.. Spoopendyke, regarding the wea-
pon with sinister expression. Now,
il you had handed me up dog-iron,
or pair of steelyards, I'd have been
right at home, but stove-hook! Re
ally my dear, I'd rather undertake to
drive nail with scythe handle"
"But the wallis so soft and lovely,
dear, it really drives them beautifully;
if they would only stick" said Mrs.
Spoopendyke, reassuringly.
"Only stick?" said Mr.. Spoopendyke,
contemptuously; "now, III bet you
never wet the mucilage on single
nail before you started. That's why
they didn't stick for you-ouch! suffer-
in Moses Are you going to stand
serenely by and see me beat my knuck-
les into shapeless pulp with this dod-
gasted measly marlin-spike?"
"Poor DEAR" said Mrs. Spoopendyke
consolingly. "You do act SO impa-
at the first trial, too. May
be it struck something hard in tile
plaster. Try another place. That's
the way [ managed that
"Oh, yes" said Mr.. Spoopendyke,
"that's the way you managed it! and
you have punched enough holes up
there to play cribbage in. Will yon
gimme another nail? Don't you see
I've knocked this one fiat, and can't
unpry it up again?"
Cant unpry it up againw ejacnlat-
ed Mrs. Spoopendyke, in very gentle
voice, handing him another nail. Can't
unpry it up again?" Well, if that
amt GRAMMAR
"Oh, amt it?" said Mr.. Spoopendyke,
with most horrifc smile. "Of course
it amt, you old female seminary with
a cracked bell in your cupulal Am
going to school to you, or am I driv-
ing nails?"
'Well, dear, sighed Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, you're surely not driving nails"
mo, you can just bet l am not dri-
wing nails, and you can bet | amt a.
goin' to try to drive no more nails
neither! And you can bet" continued
Mr.. Spoopendyke, with still density
ing intensity, and war-dance flour
sh as he leaped to the floor, "and you |
Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1881-09-16
Political Economy.

A French paper gives the following
anecdote as practical lesson in po-
lltlcal economy:
A baron illustrions in the world of
finance, desirous to treat a couple of
pretty actresses, enters a fruiterer's
store and inquiries the price of the
three earliest peaches of the season.
"a hundred francs each, sir" re-
plies the merchant, "and you can S. g
for yourself that they are splend d
ones" he continued.
at Is rather a steep price," observes
the fnancier, "but | wouldn't nil u
paying you tue price, ii | were snre
they were ripe" | will guarantee
them. Taste oneW and the merchai
cut one of the precious peacEes in two,
handed the baron one of the halves
and ate the other himself.
"They are exquisite, indeed" sa d
the baron; wrap me up these two,"
and he placed two-hundred- franc
note on the counter.
Il beg your pardon, the price is AGO
francs" said the dealer.
"Four-hundred francs? Why, it was
only 800 when there were three pea
chesw
Precisely, sir; but as there are only
two peaches left, they are rarer and
the price has naturally advanced. If
we were to eat one ot the remaining
couple the survive. being nniqne,
would be worth at least 1000 francslH
A victim of dome tic intelicity, who
is in the habit of dreaming, should
never SO to sleep in church. A con-
gregation, near Quincy, was some
what startled recently, on a Sabbath,
when venerable member yelled:
Here nowl drop that skillet old wo-
mani"
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
Lost Letters

Letters are sometimes lost and
found in an odd way. A letter con-
tanning money, and directed to New
York man, was, with others, given
to the carrier to deliver. Soon after,
the man to whom the letter was ad-
dressed complained that it had not
been delivered. An investigation was
made, but without any satisfactory
result. The next year, during the
season of 'sspring cleaning" the mys-
terry was solved, The oilcloth in the
hallway was taken up, and on the
floor. close to the front door, was
found the letter which had 50 long
been missing. The door was closed
when visited by the carrier, and i'm
thrusting the letter under the door he
had pushed it beneath the floor COW
ering. Some years ago, young man
was discharged from a Connecticut
post-office on suspicion of dishonesty.
The suspicion arose from the unac-
countable disappearance of some
money letters from the box rented
by an insurance company. When the
cool weather of autumn caused the
president Of this company again to
wear the light overcoat which he had
laid aside at the end of spring. he
found these letters in one Of the
pockets. Then he remembered that
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13

undaunted courag &c, for in no other man.
ner can we give solution to her rejec-
ton of the King of Egypt, her unremit-
ting care OF her family, her high educa-
ton Of her sons, and the great influence
she held over them.
3. She must have cultivated literature
and the graces of conversation, for how
else could she have attracted to her home
tho men OF letters, and won the compl-
ments Of distant princes.
It is the same-like causes produce
like results everywhere. Earnest study
and loving philanthropy enrich the heart
OF the mother, and bless first and enrich
most the home shrine, and thence over
flow until they brighten and bless the
weary, homesick world.
Give us more mothers prepared to in
struct the world in the true philosophy
of life, and we will have more sons to be
numbered with philosophers.
It was grand inscription, worthy the
aspiration of every mother, "Cornelia,
the mother of the Graceful But one
can scarcely imagine one of those
"Gracchi" boys commanding his mother
to "keep silence" on any question of
church or state.-EziS0beth B0yatOa
H0rbeTt,
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
London's "Fiery Mine."

It is "fact not generally known"
that there is in London "fery mine"
Of so very excitable'a disposition that no
artificial light Of any description has
ever yet been allowed to be brought
even into its neighborhood. Its pro-
duct, however, is not coal, but rum.
The rum-shed, as it is called, of the
West India dock covers space Of 2OO,-
600 square feet, with vaults of CORE
spending size, all crammed with huge
casks of spirit, from every pore of which
and the most carefu1ly-closed have
pores in plenty-the fiery vapor is for
ever streaming out into the air, only
begging for the smallest chance of con-
verting the whole area Of the docks,
with their 250-odd ships and 100000 or
10000 tons or so of cargo, and their
more or less incalculable stores of tim
Der and tea, silk and sugar, cigars and
cereals, Goals and cotton, wine, wool,
whisky, whale-fins and what not, into
the most magnificent bowl Of snap
dragon ever imagined in infant night
mare.
Into these fiery regions not even
bulls-eye lantern is or ever has been al
lowed to penetrate. Even the wharf
along the side where the great punch
cons are landed is forbidden to the ap-
proach Of vessels, every cask being trans
ferred from ship to shore in the COM
pany's own lighters. Each cask in that
vast range of dim, dark vaults is marked
and numbered, and on the right reading
of these marks and numbers depends the
efficient execution Of every one of the
numerous operations to which every In
dvidual cask has to be subjected before
its contents can go forth for the mixing
of the worlds grog. How any one but
an experienced Japanese juggler ever
manages to perform this feat in the very
brightest weather by the simple aid of
little plate of polished tin, artfully
turned and twisted to catch the solitary
ray Of highly diluted daylight, which
here and there filters down from the
floor above, is mystery by no means
among the least wonderful Of the many
of which the visitor to this commercial
paradise catches here and there a tan
talizing glimpse.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
A Word of Advice.

Why are girls so injudicious in their
federation of dissipated young men
1t is very often the case that a thor
oughly good girl will deliberately
marry man who makes no secret of
his bad habits. A life-partnership
should not be entered into without at
least as much caution as men display
in making business combinations for
limited periods. No man selects his
business partner from among men who
drink much liquor or have other bad
habits. AS for mere manners and the
ability to make ones self agreeable,
they have not of themselves influence
enough among men to secure a dollars
worth of credit or to justify any one in
believing their possessor Oh oath. A
girl who is not old enough or shrewd
enough to have learned what are the
standards by which men are tested,
would be far surer Of happy life if she
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
How He Was Laid.

It was in a smoking car on the Hudson
river road A New Yorker was exhibit
ing an invention to several gentlemen,
when an old farmer, with settled look
of sadness on his face, heaved a sigh and
said:
81 never see such a thing without
wanting to weep"
"Nothing about this invention to
weep over, that [ can see," replied the
inventor.
"Wal. it sort O calls up old recollec-
tions. Twenty years ago this fall I
thought had a fortune in my grasp.
Yes sir, I believed I had struck the big
gest thing since steam was brought into
use."
"What was it?"
"One day when the old woman was
flat down with her lame leg I had to
cook my own dinner. After I'd got the
pancake batter all fixed up couldn't
find the creased rag the old woman used
to rub over the spider. Sort O. absent
minded like Ipicked up piece ofraw tur-
nip from the table and used it instead.
It worked to charm; no smell, no
smoke, no stick"
He paused here to wipe away tear,
and then continued.
"There was the fortune. I figured
that 100000 creased rags were used in
this country five months in the year.
Fifty thousand barrels of grease were
used up greasing spider. Over 800, 900
wasted and gone. One turnip would
make six greasers 1000 bushels would
make enough to supply the country.
All that was needed was to cut them up
into fancy style, afix handle, and go
to supply the demand at 10 cents EACH"
"There was money in it.
Ono, there wasn't. I bought 100
bushels of turnips, $50 worth Of wire,
and hired two men to go to work, and
then took greaser and went over irto
Vermont to see how it would take; they
would not have it. They had something
more simple and much cheaper"
"What could it have been?"
"They spit On the spider!" replied
the old man, as tear made break
down his nose and was swallowed up in
the dust on the floor Wall Street
NeWS.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
ObeliSkS,

The Romans had passion for ODE
Esks, removing the one now in New
York, and the one il, London, from He
liopolis and erecting them before the
Cesareum of Alexandria. Here is an
account Of an obelisk greater than ours /:
The great obelisk which now adorns
the piazza Of st. John Lateran, at Rome,
was originally set up before the Temple
of Amen at Heliopolis. 1t is OF red
granite, and as it now stands it is 108
feet Z inches high, and it's faces are re-
spectively 9 feet 81 inches and 9 feet
wide at the base; one of the bases is
slightly convex, and it has been calcu-
lated to weigh 455 tons. The Persians,
the Greeks and the Romans allowed it
to remain in the place it was originally
designed for, but on the establishment
of Christianity Constantine the Great,
intending it for the adornment Of his
new capital in the East, removed it to
Alexandria about 800 A. D. This inten-
ton he was unable to carry out, but it
was brought from Egypt by his success
or, Constantius, who re-erected it In the
Circus Maximus. A ship was built to
convey the obelisk to Rome 800 rowers
tugged the huge trireme and its ponder
GUS burden across the waters of the Med
iterranean to the shores of Ostia. Ar
rived there the obelisk was slid off from
the deck of the galley on a low cart sup
ported by rollers instead Of wheels, and
it was then dragged and pushed through
the gates of Ostia into the Circus Maxi
mus. call that now remained to be
done," records the historian, Ammianus
Marcellinus, "was to set it upright,
which they hardly expected to accom-
plish. Large beams of wood were plant
ed upright and raised to dangerous
altitude, resembling forest of machine.
ry. To these were attached long, thick
ropes, which, from their weight and ten
sion, appeared but as so many slender
threads, and yelled the sky as with q
close netting. To these ropes the noun
famous mass Of granite, covered with its
profusion of hieroglyphics, was attached,
and being gradually raised up Into the
air, and f9f some time actually suspend
ed, was at last poised upon the base pre-.
pared for it by the exertions Of many
thousands Of men. A brazen sphere,
covered with plates of gold, was placed
upon the top, which, being soon after
damaged by lightning and consequently
taken away, was replaced by figure Of
flame, also made Of brass, covered with
gold leaf and carved to resemble blaz-
ing fire."
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
How Some Famous Authors Worked.

The fluent and graceful literature the
world admires was by no means as easy
to make as it is to read. Pope is af-
firmed to have kept his manuscript q
year or two for study and alteration,
and even then his printers proofs were
so full of alterations that on one occa-
sion, Dodsley, his publisher, thought it
better to have the whole recomposed
than to make the necessary corrections.
Goldsmith considered four lines day
good work, and was seven years In beat
ing out the pure gold Of the Deserted
Village" Hume wrote his History OF
England on o sofa, but he went quietly
on correcting every edition till his death.
Robertson used to write out his SEN
fences on small slips Of paper and,
after rounding them and polishing them
to his satisfaction, he entered them IN
book, which, in its turn, underwent con-
siderable revision.
Burke had all his principal works
printed two or three times at a private
press before submitting them to his pub
Usher. Akenside and Gray were indie
fatigable correctors, laboring every line |;
and so was our prolix and more mag
NATIVE poet, Thomson. On comparing
the first and latest editions of the
"Seasons," there will be found scarcely
page which does not bear evidence Of
his taste and industry. johnson thinks
the poems lost much of their raciness
under this severe regimen, but they
were much improved in fancy and deli
cacy.
johnson and Gibbon were the least
laborious in arranging their copy for
the press. Gibbon sent the first and
only MS. of his stupendous work (the
decline and Fall') to his printer !;
and Johnson's- high-sounding sentences
were written almost without an effort.
Both, however, lived and moved, as it
were, in the world of letters, thinking
Or caring of little else-one in the heart
of busy London, which he dearly loved.
and the other in his silent retreat at
Lausanne. Dryden wrote hurriedly, to
provide for the day. st. Pierre copied
his "Paul and Virginia nine times.
Rousseau was a very co1comb in these
matters; he wrote on fine gilt-edged
card-paper when he could get it. Sheri-
dan watched long and anxiously for
bright thoughts, as the MS. Of his
"School for Scandal" in its various
stages, proves. Burns composed in the
open air, the SUMMER the better; but he
labored hard, and with almost-unerring
taste and Judgment, in correcting. |
Lord Byron was rapid composer,
bat made abundant use Of the pruning
knife. Sir Walter Scott evinced his
love Of literary labor by undertaking
the revision of the whole Of the ''Wav-
erly Novels" The works of Wordsworth,
Southey, Coleridge and Moore, and the
occasional variations in their different
editions, mark their love Of re-
touching. Southey was unwearied
after his kind "a true author of
the old school. The bright thoughts of
Campbell, which sparkle like polished
lances, were manufactured with almost
equal care.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
Clothes Heartlessness.

Goethe traded in the loves of women
women whom he had attached to him
by his powers of fascination. "When
he had no woman In his heart" says his
latest biographer, "he was like dis
secting surgeon without a subject. He
said of Balzac, that each of his best nov
els seemed dug out of suffering wom-
ans heart. Balzac might have returned
the compliment. In reference to his
early fondness for natural history,
Goethe says, 81 remember that, when
child pulled flowers to pieces to see
how the petals were inserted into the
calyx, or even plucked birds to observe
how the feathers were inserted in the
wings" Bettina remarked to Lord
Houghton that he treated women in
much the Same fashion.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
Men, Women and Suicide.

Men are everywhere becoming more
weary of the burden of life. Authori-
ties on sanitation and vital statistics tell
us that, of late years, life--the average
human ife-has been considerably pro-
longed by greater attention to the means
OF preserving health yet, concurrent
with this improvement, there are
greater Impotence of life itself and a
greater desire to escape its burden.
Women are less prone to commit suicide
in Europe than men, and extensive in
vestigation Of the subject has convinced
Signor Morselli that the tendency to
suicide increases with age more strongly
among the unmarried and widowed than
among the married of both sexes. The
following table curiously illustrates this
fact. Among 100000 of persons of
each class in Europe generally, in so far
as the returns enabled him to compare
them, the following numbers committed
suicide:
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
H0ax1ng a Manager.

Mr.. Fl. G. Jarrett tells the following
story: One evening, while his party
were playing at the Opera House in
Detroit, small boy approached him,
and, holding out his hand, exhibiting
Is cents, said:
"Please, mister, I would so much Like
to see Cinderella, but that's all the
money I've got"
The boys manner touched Jarrett's
tender spot, and after asking him two or
three times if that was all the money he
had, and receiving each time pitiful
affirmative answer, he gave him a quar-
ter. The boys countenance beamed
with delight, and he did not know how
to express his gratitude. Finally, NOV
ing toward the street, he said
"You don't know how thankful I am,
sir. I am ever so much obliged to you,
sir but, now that you have been sogen-
erous, I guess I'll 90 to the other theater
and see Jack Sheppard
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
Women in japan.

The Japanese are advancing SO rapidly
in the principles OF Western civilization
that it is hard to keep up with the
changes introduced in the Mikado's en-
ire. Hitherto prejudice has forbidden
to women almost every kind of work,
but several of the principal manufacture
ers are now experimenting with female
employees. thus far the result is con-
sidered favorable. The work done by
women compares so well in quality with
that done by men that several new cloth
factories are about to be built exclusively
for the employment of women. The
worst feature Of the case is that the
women are kept ct work twelve hours in
the day without intermission but in
telligent capitalists may be expected to
detect soon the disadvantages Of over
work.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
Why the Landlord Raised the Rent.

Old Bob Keyworth is one of the hard
est landlords in Galveston. Jim Groce
lives in one of Keyworth's houses, and
is very good tenant, while the land
lord has never yet had dollars worth
Of repairs done to the house. Not long
since Jim went to Keyworth and told him
II want you to have that house painted.
I am paying 500 month, and you ought
to have it DONE" Keyworth refused, so
Groce had it done at his own expense.
As soon as the painting was over, old
Keyworth raised the rent to $25 month.
" why do you raise the rent?" asked
Jim. Con account of the improve
ment, +" replied the old man; "you know
the house has just been painted, and a
newly painted house is always worth S.
more than shabby looking one. "-Gal-
weston NeaUs.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
GOSSIP FOR THE LADIES.
HOW Can a woman Tell ?


He told me his love in the morning,
With his dear hand clasping mine,
And he said, "God speed the dawning
When, sweet, ehall call thee mine"
But my fond heart questioned softly,
Though loving him true and well,
VIII his love outlast all changes7
All how can woman tell?
When the years shall bring their trials,
And the cares and the pains outweigh
The joys in the little household,
As clouds might obscure the day,
VIII the hand that held mine 30 fondly,
When maidenly ills befell,
As earnestly shield from sorrow?
Ali how can woman tell?
When the silvery threads are creeping
Through my tresses one by one;
When lose my youth and beauty,
As many wife has done;
viii his heart be mine as truly
AS when in the dowery dell
He gave me his trusted promise?
All how can a woman tell?
I glance at my sweetheart waiting,
His eyes they are clear and true;
81 will love him." my heart says gladly,
81 will trust him the wide world through,
will be to him joy and comfort,
I will all other wives excel,
will keep him with loves sweet magic
This much may woman tell!
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
The Lily.

With the Chinese, the lily is the ma
tional flower, and many superstitions at
tach to it. Should it blossom upon New
Years day it is regarded as most happy
omen, presaging the best of luck to the
fortunate owner Of the plant. For this
reason q good deal Of care is bestowed
upon the lily by the Cinnamon, in the
hope thai it may put forth it's flower
upon the morning of the anniversary.
The Chinese lily is different from any
other variety. It is grown by placing
the bulb on bits of window glass. stone
and China, and giving it liberal sup
ply of water. The flower is white, with
a gold-colored center, something be-
tween daisy and narcissus. It's fra
GRANGE is delightful.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13
Railroads of the World.

The United States have 24.77 miles Of
railroad to every 10000 inhabitants.
This is eight times as much as Europe,
which has 1927 miles to the 10000. The
European idea is that traffic must 90
before railroads, but in this country the
idea is that railroads ought to be pushed
forward in order to open new sections to
population, and thus create traffic. Out
side Of trade demands railroads are built
in Europe exclusively for strategic pur-
poses, something never donein the Unit
ed States.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-03-13

he must have taken them from the
Office one Sunday morning, on his way
to church, afterward forgetting them,
and putting away his overcoat for the
season. Thus an innocent young man
had suffered from the criminal care,
lessness of another.