Knoxville daily chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1882, 1881-06-05

GAS COMPANION TO a LADY,"

as you can afford the rent of the one
up stairs"
Here the landlady rubbed her nose
viciously upon her apron, and stared
straight out of the very dirty VIM
dow.
AS this was evidently challenge to
me to reply, | said, as firmly as l
could, q few words which brought out
the reason for the Woman's visit that
morning.
cam [ to understand, then, that you
wish me to leave"
off you please, miss, at the end of
the week, for there's the gent on the
first floor would like to have this bed
ROOM"
Every well, Mrs. Ruddock." I said;
81 will find room elsewhere"
"Thanky, Miss" she said, sharply;
and giving her nose another vicious
rub, she left me to my thoughts-and
NY tears.
For | was weak, faint and heartsick,
and the coins in my purse had dwin-
died down, SO that if l did not succeed
III obtaining an engagement in few
days, L had no resource but to creep
back to the country and avow my fail
IRE. - ~
just three months since, and we
were all 50 happy i'll the little country
vlcarage; and then, in visiting one of
his people, my poor father caught a
dangerous fever, while in tending him
my dear mother was stricken with the
same complaint, and ere three weeks
had passed, Minnie and L sat in the
little study alone, in deep black;
for the struggle had been brief, and
those we loved lay together i'll the
green chmchyard, and we were only
Intrudcrs now in the little vicarage
that had been our home.
We were nearly penniless, too, but
q brother clergyman Of my fathers
quite as poor, came forward, and Of
tercd us temporary home, till as he
said, "some opening should occur for
us"
gladly accepted it for Minna; but
for myself, L was determined to try
great London, and, unaidcd, battle for
myself. In two years John Murray
was to come back from Australia to
fetch me for his wife, and till then [
would be independent. So the day
we two girls had to separate, and with
ching heart lett the old Lincoln
shire home, and reached the great
dreary void OF London carly one after
noon.
l was not long finding a place where
/ could stay, i'll the shape Of a second
floor front room in one of those heart
aching streets hear the Founding
streets that echo from morning till
night with mOurnful cries uttered by
vendors whose goods it is impossible
to surmise, and with the dismal echo
inc tones of the various organs. SO
painful Were the last to me, that often
of an evening, when l have returned
from a weary disheartcning search for
all engagement, and sat alone ana hum
CRY fearing to spend my money upon
any thing beyon the tea and bread and
butter upon which / existed, these
doleful misunderstanding maybe, to
sOme-have had such an effect upon
me that have sat and sobbed till, ut
terly worn out, | have fallen asleep, to
wake, perhaps, hours after, to find it
very late, and crawl shivering off to
bed.
AS the weeks passed on and my adj
vertisemcnts and fees paid to the va
rious registry off :es had been without
effect, | used to crawl back to my
room, growing more disheartened. L
was always a plain, sallow-looking,
girl, and now i'll my fast-Wearing
black, [ began to feel that [ was day
by day growing more shabby and
weary looking, and that my feeble
chances Of oblaininga post were grow
ing less and less.
Use. to sit and ask myself whether
| had tried hard-and | knew | had
but it was always the same. Whether
| advertised for a situation as gov
crncsS, or went from q registry office
to offer myself as companion to lady,
it was always the same. l noticed
look OF disappointment as soon as
entered the room, for [ was neither
pretty nor bright-looking and my
nlournful black helped to sadden my
aspect 1t was always the same-the
lady did not think | should suit her,
an, i'll blank disappointment l had to
return.
And now it had come to this-my
laldlady had grown as tired of me as
the people at the registry offices,
where had more than once been told
rutIely that | was not likely to get
place as governcss or companion, but
mad better look lower. That after
noon, evidently, suspicious of my abll-
lty TO pay, and perhaps Disguised
with my miserable way of living, and
AFRAID should be left an invalid OH
hef hands, she had rudely it seemed to
lie-Eequested me to leave.
IN my present circumstances I was
Il'erly Frustrated by the news, for
dared not take lodgings elsewhere, and
could see nothing now but to sell a
l.urtlOn OF my scanty wardrobe and 90
back to beg for assistance from NV
fathers friends.
" hat change! and how soon had
my hopes of independent action been
blighted! l was heartsore as | felt
how i'll that great city there was
wealth being squandercd and luxury
around Inc while was literally starry
ing; for my poor living was telling
upon he last. What should l do?-
" hat should | do!
1t was with weary iteration I had
said those words and wept till tears
would come no more, and dull, stolid
feeling of despair had come upon me.
| had almost shrunk away i'll the
streets from the bright-faced happy
girls passed, aud at times / found
myself asking what had been my sin