Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1881-12-29
Mistaken Identity.

| lowY'
well, if it amt Jack Duncan Glad
to see you. Come right slong home
with me-"
mo, Biggs; I'm too dirty. Been
showed in on the road; helped shovel
snow, slept in bar-room; haven't had
a change of shirts for week"
Never mind appearances, nobody at
the house. My wife took the P. NJ.
for an all night with her sister in Pains
vile. I'll furnish shirt, and I've a
tine bathing room in the houss. Come
now; you haven't honored me since !
married"
We'll, since the wife is away III sur
render. Wen have regular rooster
night of it,
Jack Duncan is bachelor, with a
holy horror of women. Feminine
presence paralyzes and stultifies him.
Here's the linen,' showing him into
the bathroom few minutes later.
There's the bath all ready. Now
shape up while go to Joe Richards
and order up one of our old college
lunches. Nobody in the house; so just
splash around at pleasure"
Biggs departed, leaving the door ajar.
Jack did not notice it in his eagerness
for immersion.
He had just tumbled out and resum-
ed his pantaloons when he heard foot
steps approaching the door. Thinking
it was Biggs returning he seized the
freshly laundried shirt, opening at the
back, and iammed his head into it. 1t
came down over his face, completely
blindfolding him, and the starch battled
his efforts to tunnel through.
just as he commenced straddling
around with suspenders dangling, he
heard a rustic that CONCEALED his blood.
The door squeaked, and cherry voice
said
Now I've got you, Mr.. Biggs. The
train left me, so | made call or two
and came back. heard you playing
sea-lion in the bathroom rs | entered
the house; got the buggy whip and
slipped up to pay you back for ever
lastingly teasing me. Now, I'm ring
master, dear hubby. Move lively"
And she popped her whip in a buis-
ness way that suspended the bachelors
animation. The shirt hid his face, and
taking his silence for a spousal submits
sion to ejoke, she began:
Gentleman and ladies: Madem-
oisello Blggs, queen of the sawdust
arena, will introduce her handsome and
perfectly trained trich mule, hubby
darling. He will walk in the arena on
his hind feet with his head and forepaws
shrouded in a linen canopy. Come,
now, Hubby, Hoop La hoop La"
She ch:riped fetching him wipe
with the whip that made his bare feet
spank the floor like clog dancer.
Timber up, Hubby "Lively, now.
| Up up, Up" and she underscored the
last cup" with briar cut, making Hub
by Darling skip so impulsisely that
darlings suspenders swished about like
a donkey's tail, and his hands dove in
stinctively to the preservation of his
unstayed pan,aloons.
81 b(indfolded Hubby Darling to pre-
vent him climbing the center pole He's
the trickiest donkey that cavorts the
magic circle. The peerless prince of
the canvas pavilion. Hoop, la Zip
she takes him. What beautiful action!
Yet, fellow countrymen, ] never curry
him down with anything but this silk
blossomed snapper, Hoop, la Poker
slash.
81 cover his ears that he may not Of
fend the most fastidious; they resemble
cross between mail bag and hui
man appendage. Hoop, la Zip, zip.)
Let the Golden Cornet Band dish up
Fishers Horn-pipe red-hot and highly
favored, and Hubby Darling shall"
"B-b-beg your p-pardon, ln-madam,"
sputtered the victim, as his cad hand
voice shot out of the shirt. Then
She started stopped
Spell bouud amazed.
The whip she dropped
And then she raised
A Cherokee shrek
And down she Topped.
But the terrified sufferer caught her
CALAMITY in his arms, just as Biggs rush
ed in with
"Jack, are you drowning? Great
heavens my wife,
"Take her Biggs. Pm tuckered out.
Awkward predicament--"
Explain yourself instantly, sirl You
half dressed, my wife in your armsl"
and he bristled all over, like barbed
wire fence.
"Hold on, Riggs; I've got about all
can stand, Let me get my clothes on
and will go where men are not mar
tyrs. Your wife thought was"
Hubby, darlington, that blindfoldl"
murmured the queen of the arena,
half consciously.
Clear that, sir! What's this about
blindfold?"
81 got stuck in that COMPOUNDED
shirt. Your wife took me for"
THE Peerless Prancer Of the Arena.
Hoop, la" gasped the queen, rousing
little
"Merciful heavensl Hear that raw
ing, You've dethroned my gifes rea-
sons Oh, base migrate! Don't leave
this house at the peril of your life.
You shall"
dance the sawdust on his hind feet"
muttered the queen conclusively.
"My poor wife, / will avenge your
wrongs" groaned Biggs, chatting her
limbs agonizingly.
"My head was fast in the shirt. She
l. d. r j A 4