The Dallas weekly herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1885, 1881-12-22
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"Do you know how 10 cure obltken
ohoiera7"
TIo man who asked the foregoing
question WIS rather old aud seedy looking,
and no addressed n cowd settling afeuhd q
hot stove In the Apollo Hall few nights
ago. Ills lntcrrogatory was general one
addressed TO no one IN particular, and as he
met with no response hc went on with The
conversation lac. had opened.
II can tell you, gentlemen, n socreiRn
remedy for this dire scourge on the poultry
yards of the country. We all love broilcd
chicken ms cooked ut the restaurants and
fried chicken as served up at the inrin
houses of the land and not one OF us but
Is fond of eggs in some shape,
even If they ore raw, on the
half shell and sucked Ia hound.
This being true then, and taking this truth
as a basis, say that everybody is interest
ed In q cure for chicken cholera and have
A panacea for it. A friend OF mine discoy-
cred it. His chickens were afflicted, that is
some of them were, and he gave every
fowl on his place pellet Of nitro-glicerine,
which they swallowed readily. In q little
while they were scratching and eating
around the yard, taking down gravel to
keep the mills in their giz2ards grinding,
heard in the yard and then came shower
ofieathers. 70 make the story short, every
chicken on the place blew up. the gravel in
their gizzards expodingthe nitro-g lJcerine
pellets and for week it rained feathers and
chicken flesh fine enough to make u sau-
sage grinders heart glad, on that place.
tell you nitro-glicerine pellets will cure
chicken cholera everytime.
Did hear any gentleman WINK! Tor
am powerful dry"
The old man sighed, as no one took the
hint, and settled back iShis chair,
Talk about panaccas and cure.alls, l
dunno nothing about them" said lank,
lean, cadaverous specimen OF the genus
hungry, "but l can tell you they're got the
peartest fish in the Warloop river that ever
swum. used to live nigh Sagene, in War
loop county. That's the county that's got
the outtalkinest man in Texas in it, Bill
Burgess. ! belonged to a company in
Furginny with him, and he talked the regi
ment into tightin' trim in fifteen minutes
but as 1 war sayin, II used to live nigh
to Segene, and / worked right smart
chance of Niger, on my plantation, though
lI,doesn't look like i now. My house was
close to the river and | had several little
children, and like all children they would
cry sometimes. My illegal was powerful
erwin child and she seemed to disturb
the catfish in the river, SO they held meet
ing one day, and after that, every day, two
or three cat Ash would come up to. the house
when the brat began to squall and they'd
sing to her and keep her quiet, and they'd
bring purity little rocks from the bottom of
the river, and acktilly, they learnt that child
how to play checkers. Vas, the fish in the
Wsrloop are all branded G Oh the lett jaw,
and used TO pearch ON limbs and cat-erwaul
around, herd buffalo and establish erl-
emosynary institutions"
A general groan followed this effort, and
the nitro-g lycerine man snorcd In self-de-
tense.
"Well, you tell pretty good stories, gen.
tlemen, but can tell you little incident
| witnessed that ought to harrow up the
feelings of every one who hears it. was
boarding. in neighboring town with
kind, motherly old lady, a
few rtonths ago and | didn't
give her any stapd-off,, either, for all
[ look now kinder like an ex-president OF
national bank that had smart cashier.
One night just before | left the house for
this city, where | hope yet to make a for
tune saving the wrecks of paper cellars
from the cutters, this old lady, kind old
sonl, may She always have lsavings enough
at supper for hash in the morning this old
lady who had been complaining all day OF
feeling mighty poorly, rs she expressed,
actually while waiting on the table, busted
Open" what! busted open and died
right there?" exclaimed the nitro-glycerine
man in tone of horror.
'No, she didn't bust open and die, but
she busted open jar of pickles right there
for the boarders."
The nitro-glycerine man, with howl Of
rage, threw his chair at the wretch, while
he of the fish story tainted.