The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1881-06-22
caONUETERs on THE CRISES.

cgONUETERS or THE CRISES.
rsow the political Sensation struck the
Femenime Port1s m OF the Community.
The night before last the Utica Croquet
Club-composed entirely Of young ladies'
held its second meeting for the year 1881.
Two new members were admitted and two
proposals for membership were made. Tie
committee on resolutions made their expected
report. The resolutions were written on
scented paper and penned with violet ink.
After the business OF the evening had been
finished the young lady sitting on the otto
man suddenly exclaimed
ooh, my Girls, did you hear about Conk-
ling ?"
.sNo, what is it p Sail the four misses in
one breath.
"'Why, he's resigned !"
sResigned to what? Hashe been danger
ously sick ?" asked the secretary.
"No, no. Can't you understan ? He has
given up the Senatorship.'
Good gracious Amt that too bad =
"How much did he get for it 2" queried
the girl with an album in her lap.
"Why you silly thing you ought to read
the newspapers. Senator got dissatisfied
with something in Washington and resigned
his office into the hands of Governor Cor
nell There was q misunderstanding be-
tween him and the president about some
man named Rob-Robert-Roberts-Let me
see. Robinson-No, that amt il. Oh, yes,
Robertson. Dear SUI! They say the whole
country is in q crisis"
Il read all about that" said the president
of the club, knowingly. "Senator Conkllng
and this Robertson had some kind of a fuss
while they were trying a lawsuit. Come
to think, Mr.. Conkling wanted to give him
some instructions and Robertson would have
it. Then this president appointed Robertson
{, collect money in some ward in New York
"That wasn't it," interrupted the first
sneaker, "The president told Mr.. Robert
son to stand at some lock-a deadlock, they
call it-and see that the canal boat captains
paid their tolls. The man who was put out
by Mr. Robertson getting the situation used
to 90 to school with Mr.. Conkling-"
sWhat I want to Know said q young
lady, sis how the president could order these
men around so. Didn't I read in the paper
the other day that Conkling was the boss p
my sakes /! that's funny" calculated the
secretary II heard my brother say that It
was 8 man named Blaine, who came here
from Canada, and wanted to run the whole
country, who caused the disturbance. The
president made this Blaine a present OF q
cabinet organ, and then he never stoppe
begging until he got q whole set OF furniture,
too. That made the other men, who didnt
get anything, jealous" !.
what were the guns fired for to-day 2
asked the girl on the sofa
''You see the Senate helped Robertson get
this job" answered the first speaker, 'and
the half-breeds were so glad they borrowed
come cannons."' !,
"Who are the half-breeds? Indians %
IT am not sure, but | don't think they are.
They must have come here when the cana
p"Girls," exclaimed the president Of the
meeting, "do you know | think that firing
was real battle ? / read in the paper las
week about tine war on the president. Ism
it awful 2"
"And I saw 'how the bomb struck.
"Oh. those horrid half-breeds ~ calculated
five voices at once.
eyes" continued the president, = and
believe they are going to be commanded D9l
that General Malone, who came to Wash
ington with o red shirt on and tried to scar
everybody"
Il am going home family said the secre
Lets all co. said the girls On the seetee
cob. I hope we wont meet any halt
breeds"