The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Is A FACT,
And the Paper Published for the
People Now on Earth Can
Prove It.

64SwS 49,
That Officer Carnes is the pet o! tn
ladies.
That the "CousIn Mollie" gag is I
good one.
That Curg Marvin is now living il
St. Louis.
That Col. Hamlin's appetite il ETH
pretty fair.
That all the pool tables in town do 1
good business.
That AL. Donobue knows how to en-
terrain handsomely.
-Thst new time card went into eiisc
on the Pacific to-day.
That "Don't Touch i'm" stamps "Ssn
dy" Anderson as one of the boys.
That the stove and ice mer have beer
all smiles for the past two weeks.
That Sedslia has more lawyers thar
any other profession can boat Of.
That "Don" Seeley is death on scram
bled eggs-when he can get them.
That all the police are jealous o
Schanawerk because he is handsome.
That Sedalisns cannot appreciate lie
gitimate, talented concert company.
That neither jesse James or Charl;
Ross were seen in Sedalis yesterday.
That Joe fe;;ier will make kind an.
loving husband If he is not handsome.
That il certain young man does no
soon bandage his head it will "bus,."
That Sedalia il without rival IN ia,
state a far as enterprise IL concerned.
That Sedalis has fewer old maid
than any city Of its size in the country.
-That Sedali. woman takes in wash
ing 70 support lazy. drunken husbsnd.
That the recent cold snap came neaI
killing Babe" Mills base ball uusische
That Tom Jefiries looks like a gen
tleman since be shaved his chm whisser'
OF.
The, 20 member Of the prssen; legis
ls,ure has more friends ,han Hon. John 7
Heard.
That Sill kea.n> esa raise more hoil'
- ,se square inch shss arr other man II
S<>:xiia
TIA, the Craig family have furnishes;
.ox ;.sns :aS Se;alis'> nsv~pspers :s>-
ry asaee.
That the Sa,crtss ErenirS Call Is the
s-ss sreechAek paper in sss!eru CT central
Nsscc.i
That more than one yeuus man will
svear to-day because he arose too late Il
get shaved.
That Sedxlis's benevolent society is
rsee,viug many kind words from the press
OF Missouri.
That Jim Merri6eld gave his wife ter
pool tickets yesterday, mistsking them for
milk tickets.
THAT Charlie Ballou has more girls on
his string than any other young man in
Jefferson City.
That /. Mac. Demuth writes the plain.
eat and loudest hand of any newspaper
man ia Sedalia.
That South Sedalia man raised the
devil with his wife because i: was d girl
instead Of a boy.
That there il no truth in the report
Joe Schrieber is soon to marry a young
lady of Cole Camp.
That "Doc." Morrow has not said a
word to his West Virginia girl about the
one be left behind.
That nine-tenths OF our manageable
young ladies are now sorry they didn't sag
something last year.
That Harry Heineken had jus,
thirteen cents in his clothes when he re-
turned from Indiana.
That the original "Uncle Tom" has a
home At the age of ninety -Iwo, in Camden
Kent county, Canada.
That Gentry, Buliep, Keno ct al. are
immense when it comes to singing, "Good.
bye, my lover, goodbye"
That "Red" Maclesn put his foot in
It when be wrote that squib about the Con.
gregational church converts.
That Q Fifth street belle shed tears
when she heard that Cephas was engaged
to . widow residing In Marshall.
That the Rentz Santley blondes would
pack Smiths Opera house with bald head
ed men, would-be bloods and kids-
That the Evening News must be down
on Sedalia's temperance lodge, or it would
not be constantly harping of black baIling.
That the boy who throws 3 SNOWFALL
ct the old name hat is the first one in the
seat when the Christmas tree presents are
given out
That tramp presented himself at .
Tenth street residence and Was willing to
make affidavit, that he had not partakeD of
food for four days.
THAT Senator Blaine thinks Uncle
Sam can afford to carry q letter from
Maine to California for two cents, instead
OF three, as now charged.
That every town should have baby
show at least twice . year, ard valuable
prize given to the baby that hss walked up
it father the fewest times.
That Commodore Mutt il a little ieI-
lows, hut he keeps a big saloon 10 New
York, and has to take bis chances on be-
ing fined once in . while for disorderly
conduct
-Thst when BARRIERS talk TO one another
in their foreign language the victim in the
chair is likely to think that they are talk
ing about him. The result lie not always
in favor of the barber.