Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1881-01-20
Extinct Cats.

" .
did not live in the pliocene or miocene
periods. We may think that there are
. good many cats at the present day,
and that we suffer q good deal from
them, but both in quantity and quality
the pliocene and miocene cats must have
been frightful. Prof. E. D. Cope has
recently written a paper on the extinct
Cats OF America" which is enough to
make ones flesh creep with horror,
while at the same time it fills the heart
with gratitude.
Prof. Cope has found the fossil re-
mains of no less than forty distinct
species of cats, almost any one of which
was larger, fiercer and louder than any
modern cat. The very names of these
atrOciOus animals fill the mind with ave.
Fancy the noise that a Honyoploneus
-OTeOdOntts must have made when in
dulging in tones of endearment toward
another cat of the same style. How
tough and impossible to Stay with ordi-
nary bOOt-jacks must have been the
NanardUus 9OnaphOdus, and what dam
gerous brute to meet with in a dark
pliOcene cellar was the SqailOlo,a tdtGlSs
These were only few of the forty-seven
kinds of cats which made life burden
to unhappy men with whom they were
contemporary; and in all probability
Prof. Cope will find large quantity of
additional cats before he gets through
with his Investigations.
These cats are found chiefly in the
neighborhOod of fossil back fences,
fact which proves that their habits were
essentially the same as those of existing
cats, although, of course, they were
more offensive, for the reason that the
larger any bad habit may be the more
Objectionable it is. No boot-jacks or
beer bottles have, however, been found
by Prof. Cope in either pliocene or mio-
Gene strata. This does not prove, as
the Professor seems to imagine, that
boot-jacks and beer bottles did not exist
at the periods in question, but it rather
indicates that the contemporaneous
men and women were so awed by the
size and ferocity of the cats that they
did not have the heart to throw things
at them.
We can readily understand that it is
not safe to throw boot-jacks at all sorts
of animals. Take, for example, the
Ninravus gomphodus. He was Gas
large" says Prof. Cope, Gas the full
grown panther of the large varieties"
He wore his upper canine teeth outside
of his mouth, which gave him terribly
fierce and bloodthirsty appearance. His
sectorial pparatus''-which he APP
pears to have constantly carried with
him-was respectfully effective and
he also had compressed mandibular
zami," which must alone have stricken
terror into the observer. Now, who
would risk irritating such an animal by
shying Il boot-jack at him? He would
probably have jumped from the fence
into the back window and clutched his
pliocene insulter at a single bound. 1t
is all very well to throw things at the
modern degenerate cat, but the man
who fooled with pliocene and miocene
cats deserved the fate which he undoubt-
edly experienced.
Another leading cat was the Pogono-
don drochyops, and fully deserved the
name. This formidable beast possessed
"the biting functions in high degree
of efficiency. Among his most remark
able peculiarities were "the truncate
triangular post-tympanic process
process of which he is believed to have
been especially fond, and which was in
describably painful when applied to a
human victim; Sc the transverse frOntO-
maxillary suture," which greatly irritat-
ed his naturally bad temper; and his
g preorbital impressed depression'-a
state of feeling quite in keeping with the
suilen and morose humor for which he
was noted. 1t is very clear that when
such n cat lifted up his voice in the back
yard the only thing for prudent man
to do was to close his shutters and say
his prayers. As for attacking a cat ac-
customed to the infection of "the trun-
cate triangular post-tympanic process
on his victim, it would have been safer
to have attacked a grizzly bear.
The Pogonodon otatacopts cat was
about the size of the jaguar and twice
as wicked. 1t was, in Prof. Cope's
opinion, (" a great destroyer of contem-
porary mammalian life '-meaning
chickens and such-and it is only too
probable that "the largest ungulates of
the Truckee fauna were among it's vic
tims.'' We thus see that neither
strength nor skill availed against this
devouring pogonodon. The ungulates
of Truckee were undoubtedly the lead
ing citizens. of that locality-men re-
spected for their courage and admired
for their strength. If even the brave
ungulates were killed and eaten by the
pogonodon, what chance had weaker
It is probable IL ~ these extinct cats rem
dered the other inhabitants of the coun-
try extinct at an early date, and after
ward died of starvation because there
were no more dinners to eat.
Well may we be ashamed of the muir
muring and repining in which we have
occasionally ind uiged when the contem-
poraneOus cat has mewed at unseemly
ho,1rs Our cats NAV howl and swear
seize upon the latest member of the
family, and then and there devour him
or her, as the case may be. The world
has improved since the pliocene period,
and there is nothing which more forci-
bly, illustrates this improvement than
the fact that the extinct cats were in
finitely worse than are the most de-
PRAYED of the cats of the present era
N. Y. Times.