The Pickens sentinel. [volume] (Pickens, S.C.) 1871-1903, 1881-03-10

BOILER explosions are becoming so
numerous that vaccination appears neces-
sary to keep them from breaking out.
-l'hitadei1ohia ChronicIe- Herald.
A CHICAGO restaurant keeper adver-
tlses "roast turkey and cram berry saus,"
and yet q hungry man might go where
they spell better and fare worse.-Ne,U
Orleans Picayunc.
"DosT love me2 Tell me once again.
My little pootsy tootsl"
with love-lit eyes she sweet replies:
" DO II You bet your bootsl"
Modern Argo.
The Cleveland Herald has published
some verses entitled: "Why do I sing?"
and written by n young woman. It is
probably because her father paid five
hundred dollars to music teacher for
spelling good stocking darner
AT an undertakers' conference in New
1orkrecently, one undertaken complained
that the sections were getting ''all the
cream of our business" What for Heav-
ems sake, is 'the cream" of the under
takers business?
IN oldon times when people heard
Some swindlcr huge had come TO grief
They used good old Saxon word,
And called that mRn "thief."
But language such as that to-day
Upon too many feelings CRATES
so people smlc and simply say,
lie rC-hypcthccatcs.' "
THE man who journeyed long to spH
upon the grave of his enemy found that
the said enemy was drowned in lake
and his body not recovered. There are
lots or things Ill this world to make n
man mad.-Detrou Free Press.
THE Galveston NcacS says man in
that city who had mule for sale, hear
ing that friend i'll Houston wanted to
buy mule, telegraphed to him: "Dear
trend-lf you are looking for No. !
mule don't forget me-"
AN exuberant youth halls q supposed
acquaintance with Hello, joe" but,
finding his mistake, adds: go, excuse
me; L thought you were another man !"
l1acomc stranger answers: "I -
BM0alo Elprcss.
No Adolphus, newspaper men do not
have duplicates of the last straw that
broke the camel's back. They arc USE
ful, as you say, but newspaper men are
so accustomed to d-k-g the other
way, they don't care straw about
them!
A MINISTER overlook a Quaker lady
and politely assisted her in opening q
gate. AS she was e compartive stranger
III town, he said: "You don't know.
perhaps, that L am Mr.. -. Haven't
you heard me preach?" CT have heard
you try" was the quick rejoinder.
AS for me-" says Mime. H., whose
husband is member of the Assembly,
81 always do my shopping when the
Senate is discussing the appropriation
Dllls. linen, you see, my husband is ac-
customed to such large figures that nv
bills look small to him. ."-French paper.
This is the particular time of the wear
when tho citizen is attacked with &C.
vore case of economy, md immediately
cuts off his entire list Of newspapers.
There is one paper he does not relin-
qnish, however. It is his paper of to-
bacco.-Rockta1ed Courier.
THE man who works in n factory. his
pay day comes once month; but the
man who works at ditching has his spade
day oftenor than that Alteration Inde-
pendent. Hoel Hoe! Fork conscience
sake shove long this pun, and don't har-
row up our feelings In this way.
A YANKEE tobacco chewer was in the
habit OF declaring about once month
that he would "never chew another
piece" but broke his pledge as often as
he made it. On one occasion, shortly
after he had "broken off," he was seen
taking another chew, "Why," said his
friend, "you told me you had givel up
that habit, but [ see you are at it again"
" Yes" he replied, "I have gone to
chewing and left off lying"