davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The right kind of boy, with a
pea.shooter, can take a mans mind
Off his business troubles and politics
quicker than anything else in this
bleak, cold world.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

A gentleman was complaining on
Change that he had invested rath
er LARGE sum OF money in Wall street
and lost it all. A s. mpathizing friend
asked him whether be had been =
bull or a bear. Tn which he replied
Neither, was jackasssa
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25
FROM THE FAR WEST.

PerilOus situation of a Steamer,
Recalling the loss of ''Br0th>
err Jonathan Decoration
Day--A big fish story
farming, railroad and
manufacturing in
terests, Temper
q ance. Sentiment
talism, &c.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The Kanawha Gnzette pays u high
compliment to Judge Patton, the sue
ccssor of Judge Moore, on the SUI
preme bench. 1t expresses the opin-
ION that he will discharge the duties
of his position "with scrupulous con
scientiousness and also with marked
ability" trrerf48tap(gal
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

"WelI,' said Blinkins, majestical-
", "we mustn't be too severe on the
young fellows. I suppose ! was as
big fool as any Of them when ! was
young"
"Yes,' replied Fogg, land you are
not an old man now, Blinkins."
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

In describing new organ, a rural
musical critic says, "Thc swell died
away in a delicious snffocation, like
one singing sweet song under the
bedclothes.'
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The meanest man lives in Audubon
county, Mo. He pleaded in breach
of-promise suit that contract enter
ed into on Sunday night was not
binding.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

"Gentle maid, why SO detected;
Pray tell me why this great distress;
Pray dor' sighed he.
"Why Tom proposed so unexpected
That l said no when meant yes;
Boo-hoor' cried she.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Teacher-A quadruped is an ami
NAL having four legs. Now who will
give me the name Of quadruped?'
And thirteen shrill voices piped ont,
"A table" There is nothing like
object teaching, especially when the
object is directly before the pupils
ewes.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Mary had a little lamp,
And tried to blow it out,
The paper states that Mary went
Right up the golden spout
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Artemus Ward once found himself
in little Maine hotel, where the
wind, coming through two broken
panes in his bedroom, nearly frOze
him to death. He rnmmaged around
til room but could find nothing but
hoopskirt, which he hung up against
the window rcmarking, lit will keep
out the coarsest Of the cold anyhow.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Amid the changes and chances OF
this passing scene, it is scarcely safe
to shed flannels without seeing that
your insurance policy is all right.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

A gentleman from Indiana recent
ly registered in an Illinois hotel, and
looked at the printed notice in his
bed room, "Please do not blow out the
gas" The occupant of the adjoining
room heard him remark, Il pay my
money, and ! am going to blow out
the gas if / want to-"
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The Ohio Democratic State Con-
vention will meet at Columbus, July
18th. The names of several prom
inent Democrats of that State are
mentioned in connection with the
nomination.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

"Wcll, yon arc the biggest goose |
ever SAW exclaimed Jones to the
partner Of his joys and SORROWS.
And Mrs. Jones smiled upon him
with seraphic smile as she remark
ed, ooh, Jones, you are such for
getful darling
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The new version of the Bible will
not meet very large sale among
those who already have aversion to
the Scriptures.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

A jury is often a body organized
to find out which side has the smart
est lawyer.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Shakespeare had been boy; he
had learned in early life the signlil-
cation Of slippered pnntaloon.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

allow came you to fail in sour cA-
amination2" asked certain Pro-
fcssor. II thought ! crammed you
thoroughly"
swell, you see," replied the stu
dent, "yeu crammcd me SO tight /
couldn't get it out"
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Mr.. Gush: "0h, what ecstatic
mhsic. Itwoull make stick dance
Miss Cool, with great Occurrences:
Wont you try it a turn, Mr.. Gusfl?'
And yet Gnsh didn't see it and said !;
.Chawmed, I'm sure"
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The urinary and digestive organs
are strengthened by using Browns Iron
Bitters.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Love lightcns labor" as the man
said when he saw his wife doing his
work for him.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25
nomination

The advices from the East in re-
gard to the wool market continue to
be encouraging. The New York Bul-
leGn of Saturday says that 'prices
of nearly undesirable grades are
gradually creeping towards a higher
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

THE New DOMINION and Wheeling
Weekly Register $3.50 q year.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25


IA y & 4 - Z = r.
1HE kanawha Gnzette pays h'Sh
compliment 10 Judge laetoh' the sue
ccssor OF Judge Moore, on the gu
preme bench. IL expresses the oPih-
ion that he will discharge the duties
al his position with scrupthous con
scicntiousness and also with marked
ability. TET9rf1 - ~ s8Al
Ono Democrats say that senator
Senator Thurman wiithot De noihlh-
ated for Governor They don't care
TO elect q Governor this eyeassas II
would do them no particular good.
They intend to bend. all their ener-
gies to the election OF, a 'Legisiature'
which will have the re-districtlng OF
the State for Congressman.
Cor. d. d. JoHNsoS called at the
Reoister office on his way home from
the University commencement. lie
saws the school is in a most flourish
ing condition and that the students
themselves are full of enthusiasm in
favor Of the institution and all will
20 home as regular missionaries in
the cause. The prospects of the
school he reports as being exception
ably bright for the coming year
Injecting heg'sfc', I4th "st.
PRor. RILEY, of the United States
chronological Commission, says that
the locusts now appearinp in the
Nest and South are. of two distinct
broods; that one is the thirteen year
and the other the sevcnteer year To-
Gusts. and this is the first time they
have appeared together in the same
year since $780, Riley saws these
locusts cannot do any damage except
to Young fruit trees. in the limbs of
which they deposit eggs. He says
Che notion that these locnsts sting
human beings is a falacy. That a
species of digger wasp feeds ON these
voune locusts. and people have been
.tund nv these wasps. from which the
h.l;af has snrano fhat loc,ists sting.
RILEY AVS that these locusts willsud-
den}v disappear before long. ,-,.o1 s..
siau. , :, ~
i hA y".f n''rA = - -, ,e' ~
Isasen y y aseo"'" ' ~ 'i 10
Presen' ou''ooA 'o' ~. s'''on s.,ops'
my nay any co'" 'iin NAM . ."e oe,' any ~.
porn anu 'ne' p,0"''e wei" n"'
be beyond md al probable s damage and
'ne plosl'eoss Iva n'l'y s'r,y 800
grow.s c'op a'e ou 80 &c - o''' /,
ness interests OF tne County 'epen''
upon ehese crops '"liy as "aca as
they ever alu before, ana tneir me
condition lends buoyancy to all
branches of trade. 6eT
4 M, ,,hootf cron % tho only ono
80 4S ~
which mas ~ suheleu "ny MARSHA
damage, and this is principally In
the Western States. The best sources
of information indicate that the de-
s.;onov 5, tho winter whe.t this
noio"oJ ~ WY "iA'Si J" A1S"T y :.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

If you are sick, nervous, dyspeptic,
etc., Browns Iron Bitters will cure you.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Drunkenness turns a man ont Of
himself aud leaves beast in his
room.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25
NO. H..
Bosom Friend-Shirt studs.

Cordiality; Lets shaker as the
Jersey ague said to the earthquake.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Natures true assistant in curing
urinary and digestive troubles il
Browns Iron Bitters.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

The President has appointed JUDD
son Spoffcrd postmaster at Hunting
ton, and Lewis w. Ewart postmaster
at Charleston.
The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1881-06-25

Ono Democrats say that Senator
Senator Thurman willhot be nomin-
a,ed for Governor. They don't care
TO elect o rGovernor1this ayeaBsas it
would do them no particular good.
They intend to bend all their ener-
gies to the election Of. a Legislature,
which will have the re-districting ol
the State for Congressman.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

THE Word radical seems TO have
been dropped from the vocabulary
ofthe Republican party, and the
word stalwart substituted. Radical
ism having been discovered TO be
that ruthless spirit CT aggression
which in religion burned the martyrs
at the stake, and in politics estsb.
.ished the guillotine in France, and
at various time defeated the best
efforts of man for good government,
has been, nomihally at least, dis
carded; aud stslwartism, now in
vogue, is simply bruskness and reck-
lessness in error-yerily, the jsckase
in the lions skin.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

The Presbytery Of West Virginia met a,
Fairmout on October "a.
The opening sermon vac preached by
the Rev. samuel Graham. Of Kiugwood,
from John ix. d and tbc Presby,cry was
constituted with prayer.
The Rev. j. y. Reed, Of ssiorfv. le,
wac elected Moderator for the mex, Elk
months, and the Rev. w. a. Powell was
elected Temporary Clerk.
The Rev. j. y. Fitzgerald was received
by certificate from tbo prcsbytery on Gin
c,nn.u, and tte Rev. William a. PpwoI
was received by certificate from. the prct-
bylcry Of Baltimore.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11
GEN. SHERmAN,s REPORT.

Calling for an Increase in the Reg
ular Army i'm a Time of Peace.
Gen. Shei man has submitted his an
nual report to the Secretary of War,
enclosing the reports of Gems. Drum
and Ssckett, and the reports Of the
commanding Generals of the divis-
ions and departments. Gen. Sher-
man says, referring to the reports oil
the latter, that they all show that
the companies are too email for efici-
cut discipline and for economic ser.
vice. When tne national Treasury
was poor and loaded with debt the
army endeavored to gracefully sub
nit to overwork; but now, says Gen.
Sherman, they appeal for relief, and
it IL recommended that Congress re-
peal that clause Of the existing law
which limits the enlisted force OF the
army to 25 1000 men.
Considerable space is devoted Ia
a discussion Of Tho subject Of officers
servants, Gen. Sherman maintain
ing that no soldier should ever be
compelled To- do mental labor With
out compensation or without his con-
sent and he recommends that the
existing law be repealed or modified
50 as 10 secure this end.
Speaking Of West Point, be says
1t has been and must continue to be
The fountain source Of military ed
u%cation ia time Of peace. In bis
judgment, the Military Academy at
West Point fulGIs its usep, and can
safely be intrustd to prepare Toys
TO become soldiers ofthe future.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11
ELECTIONS.

TCESDI Us ELECTIONS.
We take the following from the
Wheeling DAILY Register Of y~ester-
day:
The result Of Tuesdsy's elections,
as whole, furnishes substantial
ground for qualification and congrat-
ulation.
Without making uncertain claims
upon what are yet indefinite results,
we may say without Boosting that
the Democratic party has bagRed a
a good share of the game that was
really in dispute.
The Democrats went into the
election in most OF the States ex-
pecting nothing, and with the odds
so greatly against them that the
party had nothing to lose, and has
gained something.
A review Of the standing Of the
contesting parties in the States
which elected officers, will show, that
in six out OF nine the Republican,
were largely in the majority. The
following gives, in round numbers,
the result in each Of these States at
the last general election:
Maryland, Dem. majority 5000
Massachusetts,, Rep. majority-47 600
Minnesota, Rep. NATURALIZATION
Mississippi, Dem. majority----32,O0O
Nebraska, Rep. majority-----22,O OO
New York, Rer. majority 5000
Pennsylvania, Rep. majority.-l4,0OO
Virginia, Dem. majority------44,0O O
Wisconsin, Rep. majority-----2l,O 900
In nearly or quite all of these Re-
publican States, we say, the MAORI
ties have either been reduced or en-
tirely wiped out.
The r%esults on Tuesday in each
Of the three most important States,
Virginia, Pennsylvania and Now
York, are very close. We believe
that full returns will show that we
have carried Virginia, if not on the
vote for Governor, yet on the more
important contest for the Legisla-
ture. MAHoNE's bent for boasting
ID pr%overbial, but it won't swell the
votes already cast, and we shall live
in hopes that his mongrel ticket ia
repudiated rather than the honor
and credit of his State.
The feature Of the election in
Pennsylvania was the hot fight
made by WOLFE, an Independent
Republican candidate, against
BAILEY, who was put in the field by
the CAMERoEs, and in which it was
hoped the Independents and tho
Democrats would elect the Demo
cratic candidate, NOBLE. If they
have not done it, they have, at %lesat,
scared them very badly.
Inc mosC General interest n q
New York election centered in the
four Congressman, by which the slim
Republican majority in the lower
House vas likely to be still further
reduced in the election Of Democrats
to fill those vacancies.
The Democrats succeeded in elect
ing a successor to FERNANDO WooD,
deceased, and also captured the Re
publican di.trict lately represented
By MORTON. AsToR, Republican,
who ran an expensive campaign IN
that district, was defeated and Mr..
FOWLER, his Democratic opponent,
was elected,
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

The line Of distinction between
the mere politician or partisan and
the statesman ia wide and deeply
marked. The statesman is devoted
to his country and it's interests-the
partisan to his party and its success.
The statesman devotes his life to adj
vance the welfare of his country
the partisan would sacrifice bis
country and revo'utionize its Gov
eminent to save his party.
1t is a melancholy reflection that
the degenerscy and downward ten
dsncy in u own public affairs have
become very manifest Of late years,
and yet the people are either uncon.
scious of it or Indifferent to it.. The
high tone, elevated sentiment, and
dignifed bearing, formerly charac-
t%eristic Of our public men, have
given way before the selGshness and
violence Of party spirit. Men get
Office and place now by artifce and
personal solicitation. The elections
OF prominent officials are secured by
promises Of place aad Office to yo-
terra, which is no better 10 p-iaciple
than buying votes with money, and
yet this is deemed TO be all right.
And in the qusdrennial National
contest for the Presidency, the
whole coustry is in connection on
The mstter OF the distribution OF
The Offices, honors, and emolumsnts
Of The Government. It hss become
a great popular struggle every four
years, DOT for the selection Of the
greatest and best man, nor for meas
ures Of public policy TO advance the
welfare and happiness Of the people,
but for the spoiis Of party in The
distribution Of the Offices az rewards
for partisan services and civil SER
vice reform and retrenchment pro-
posed to correct this enormity and
degradation, are ridicuIed and pro.
%noUnced Improbable by psrtisan
leaders.
The dangers Of these mere strug-
gles Of ambition and cupidity Of this
partisan violence, and Of these Sec
tionsl parties cannot te overestims-
ted. The desire TO WELD the i'm
meuse power and moneyed resources
Of this yast country furnishes potent
motives 70 stimulate cUpidity and
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

The State of Missouri is taking
active measureP to induce immigra-
tlon' and through its Immigration
Society has prepared and published
and distributed broadcast a minute
description of every county in the
State. Missouri thus sets an exam
PIE that West Virginia ought to
profit by.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

Henry CLAY, in one Of the
greatest efforts Of his life in The
United States Senate, in March,
1889, and on a subject involving the
peace and welfare Of the country,
said, after remarkiDg that some Of
his friends bad sdmoDifbed bin that
q free expression Of bis views on the
sutJect might uDfavorably affect
him before the then approaching
National Wing Convention for the
uomiDstiop Of q candidate for the
Presidency, that "HZ WOULD RATHER
BE RIGHT THAN BIZ PRESIDENT
The greatness and sublimity Of this
expression has rot been fully a2pre.
cisted by The people Of this country.
This great statesmsn although laud-
sbly ambitious Of the Presidency.
when be foresaw the danger Of 8
bloody civil war end eubversiop o.
the Union, rose in q burst Of elc-
quencs and patriotism above ali sell
fish and personal We've, and showed
The world that with BIN The safety.
honor aud welfare Of the country
we're priced above all other consid
erstiobs. Such an expression Of dis.
interested devotion 10 hIs country
was not snrpsssed by the sublimest
expression Of patriotism in ancient
Greece or Rome.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11
mi SpuILS YSrFm

THE TOLLS SYSTEM.
The distribution Of the Offices OF
the Federal Government as rewards
for partisan services has been for
years a great and growing evil, de-
moralizing the political elements OF
the whole countryt but not until
within a few months past has it been
demonstrated to the world that the
liberation of this corrupting abuse
had not only placed the life Of the
President in jeopardy, but has sc-
fully and VIGOROUSLY caused the
death Of a President by violence.
1t is time for the people to pause
ond contemplate the utter and in
eVitable ruin Of our political system,
to which we are rapidly Fastening,
and provide at once an effect ual
remedy for the direful evil. Nc
matter how, or with what p arty, the
abuse originated, every good and
patriotic citizen will lend a helping
hand to avert the danger, aud wholly
eradicate this monstrosity.
The Constitution must be amended,
and the appointing power taken
away from the President. II there
be public virtue enough left amoung
our people to preserve our institu-
%tions, this amendment mill be wade
at once. The existence Of this defect
In u political syste EN- is too appa-
rent to admit Of controversy. Dur
ing the csnvaes for, and the election
OF, a President, the whole country
is ~conVulsed with popular tex ent
and commotion, disturbing the
healthful course Of bueiness, and
demoralizing the masses of the peo-
pie. And after the inauguration Of
a President unnumbersd multitudes
of people flock to the capital and be-
come clamorous and aveno for the
rewards for their political services
and alleged personal sacrifices, and
when refused, as a majority Of them
have to be, they become agonized by
the disappointment, crazed by dis
pair, and incensed against the Pres
ident, who Yields the appointing
power. All this results from placing
within the control Of the President
the vast patronage and control over
ear two hundred thousand Offices,
with their honors and emoluments.
And the great measures Of foreign
and domestic policy, which demand
the undivided attention OF the Pres
ident, have to be neglected for this
disgraceful scramble for Office.
There are two modes Of correcting
this evil. One lie by the appoint
ment Of a ccnmissicn to make the
appointment, under the advice and
approval Of the head Of the depart
ment to which the service belong.
Aud the other is to take away the
Monarchical feature from our Con-
stitution, and make the Government
Republican, as to the executive
branch, by having q supreme execu-
tive council Of three or FIVE presi-
dents, taken from different perts of
the country. Under this arrange
ment all the local officers, such as
postmasters, collectors of customs,
&C., could be properly left to the
election Of the people in their appro.
pirate districts.
Either Of these changes would
efectually remove the existing evil,
which now not only corrupts and
d%smoralizes our political syrtem, but
endangeIs tho life Of the President,
and tends to ultimate revolution and
destruction.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

GOVERNOR JACKSON has appointed
Mr.. W. F. BUTLER, OF Wheeling.
TO the position of Adjutsnt General
and State Librarian, made vacant by
the resignation of E. L. WooD.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

IL portions of Michigan, Illinois,
Wisconsin and Minnesota snow has
fallen TO a varying depth Of FIVE to
ak inches, and in Canada, New York
and New England the snow storms
have been furious. In st. Lawrence
County, New York, snow fell to the
depth OF a foot,
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1881-11-11

The trainers Of the Constitution
OF the United States had such a
horror Of the words "slave" and
slavery that neither are to be
found in that sacred instrument as it
came from the hands af the fathers
, o. the Republic, OF as it was oriei-
nally adopted by the several States
uhi:h formed the Union.