River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1881-08-11
In A NUTSHELL.

nv "a Az -
Do not Judge of mans character
by the umbrella he carries. 1t may
not be his.
California spectators in stocks who |
invest large sums are called high |
rollers"
There are upwards of $500 tenement
houses in Boston, ana about one-fifth |
of the population resides in them.
We expect shortly TO be forcibly alb
Quoted by railroad man, and paid SO !
to go to Chicago.-N. Y. Commercial.
1t is reported that the west end OF
Coney Island has been bought by "a
company which intends to build a mil
lion-dollar hotel
The only legal way to sell bibles in
Austria is to take subscription and
then send the bible to the subscriber by
mail. The postage is one third the
price of the bible.
The Baltimore Sun says there are y
vessels at that port loading and char
tered to load refined petroleum for Eu-
rope, with an aggregate capacity of IA
400 bushels.
A man who stopped at the Barnet
House few days ago registered as
Bjalmar TJdaden Hiolgersen. Have we
another sweet singer of Norway among
us? Heaven forbid. = Darlington
Hdwkeye.
Life in the market-"Isn't that
beautiful color?" said fish dealer as
he cut in two large salmon. eyes,
said Flotsam; 81 expect he's blushing
at the extravagant price he's getting for
himself"
Speaking of the New York CONNER
cidPs statement that Carlyle was
crank, the Boston Globe adds that he
thought everybody else was a puir
meeserable wretched dun fule.
The Boston Posts definition of "fam-
lily secrets: They're what your cook
tells your neighbours cook over the area
fence in the morning before you're
up"
An endeavor to abolish the teaching
of Spanish in the San Francisco evening
schools has just failed. The language
is found to be too useful TO business in
that region to be given no.
The ex-Duke of Nassau, recently or
dered fifty nightingales at Vienna to be
sent to Koenigstein, near Ems, where he
set them free, and VIII re he hopes they
will make themselves at home and
multiply, their predecessors having en-
tirely disappeared from that vicinity.
New Orleans has sixteen steamers
engaged in the Mediterranean fruit
trade. During the present year they
have landed ~ less than go, 900 boxes
of oranges and lemons, and about 10000
more boxes have been brought in by
sailing vessels.
4 Herdic coach was seen at the South
End the other evening CARRYING one
passenger and displaying the sign
Full" The public mind is agitated
with doubt Did it refer to the passen-
ger or driver?-B0st0n Transcript
After the choir in one of the churches
in Ithaca, n. Y, had performed
opened the Bible and began reading in
Acts XXX: "And after the uproar ceased"
-NeU York Musical Critic.
One letter out of every 800 sent is
unclaimed in the office to which it goes.
One letter in 2S3 sent turns up in the
Dead Letter Office. One letter out of
300 sent is held for postage at the of
flee of mailing-and this amounts to
nearly 800, 600.
A person overheard two countrymen,
who were observing naturalist in the
field collecting insects, say one to an
other: whats that fellow doing, John?"
"Why, he's a naturalist" whats
that?" "Why. one who catches gnats,
to be sure"
A blind man departed in very an
CRY state Of mind from the mayors Of
! flee in Philadelphia on Wednesday, be-
cause he had been refused permit to
carry pistol He said he wanted it
for lf-protectiOn, and could easily tell
where to shoot by hearing.
Boston seems to be the favorite mar
ket for horse mackerel A fish of this
species, weighing between 500 and 600
pounds, which was caught near Gardi-
ner's Island, in New York Bay, was
packed in ice and sent to the Boston
market instead of to New York.
The petition of wife for divorce,
filed in Cincinnati, says that the parties
were married in that city Sept. s, 1880
and yet alleges gross neglect of duty
and willful absence on the part of her
husband for more than three years.
How he was married while absent re-
mains to be shown.
AS an article of food, the lobster is
the most important of all crustaceans,
and dates back to the early ages of the
world. Latium was famous for its lob
sters, and Atheneus, whose cook book
is the oldest in the world, mentions APP
icius, who spent most of his time at this
place on account of its Holsters
The tricycle. has been adopted by the
Birmingham police force for the pur-
pose of facilitating the work of the
sum mOning officers, to whom Its use
will for the present be exclusively con-
fined. Should the experiment prove
success, it is expected the use of the
machine will be further extended.
Cremation, is no longer popular, i
see," remarked Job Shuttle this morn
ing. "Well, / sh'd hope not. Its bad
enough to think of your soul burning
up, let alone the body" "Mrs. Shuttle,
| wish you wouldn't accent that word
your, and look at me SO sharply"
And the meal was finished in silence
NeaC Hdrea Register
A NEW and most ingenious speaking
machine has lately been exhibited by
Herr Faber, before the Physical society,
London. 1t is designed to more per-
fectly initiate, mechanically, the utter
ances of the human voice by means Of
artificial organs of articulation made
on the human model, and it is worked
by keys, like a musical instrument A
bellows made of wood and india-rubber
aarvap for lunOs. q small wind mill Ia
placed in front of the bellows to give
thrilling sounds; the larynx is made of
single membrane of hippopotamus
hide and india-rubber; and a mouth
with two lips and a tongue and an in
dia-rubber nose complete the organs of
the apparatus. Fourteen distinct
sounds are uttered by it, and by COM
bining these, any word in any language
can be produced-als laughing and
whispering.