The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1881-04-01
WIT AND HUkOR

Some men are called mnfts because
they 4 used 70 keep q hiTt's hand
in
When the baby cries for ''bread' il
is the most natural thing in the world
for the mother Z give Il 8 rock
The liberty of the press must be Pre-
served said the small boy as be stole
up 10 the cider-mil armed with ; bum
die of straws-
Class in history-Professor- What
important parsonage was confined on
the island of ST. Helena?n Nj. H.;
Robinson Crusoe."
Deaf Lady-What's his nameP Young
lady-Augustus Tyler. Deaf lady
Bless me, what a namei "Busthis
Biler." Eliza, you must be making fun
of me.
Mistress: MARY, this venerable goose
is tough enough 10 break ones teeth"
Maid; ''Yes'm; didn't you tell me,
ma'am. you wanted it for a piece de re-
sistanee.
Ii is claimed that man never loses
anything by politeness. but this has
proved a mistake. As an old Philadel-
phian lifted his hat to a young lady the
wind carried away his wig.
What decoration is hat you are
wearing?" said an Austrian sergeant to
a new recruit. The man blushed deep
ly and responded, at is a medal our
COW o at the cattle-show."
The editor wrote "An evening with
Saturn" and it came out in the paper
IAN evening with Satan" 1t was
mighty rough, but the foreman said it
was the work of the devil" And it
looked that way.
Said a Galveston school teacher: elf
| have ten apples and give you five and
your big brother five, what will be left?"
i.rll be left" responded the younger
brother, for he will get away with all OF
them. That's the Kind of presidential
candidate he is"
Ayoung man who had inherited tho
day before q large fortune from his
uncle gave a dinner to q few friends.
He inquired at the restaurant if they had
some old cheese. YES" replied tho
waiter. lis 1t strongpn '.Strong enough
10 bring the dead to life" Il don't
want it, replied the heir.
A Michigan boy ate a bar Of soap on
n wager, and then drank d lot of soda
10 take the taste out OF mouth, and the
way he spouted suds and soap bubbles
for the next half hour bafled the skill
Of fourteen doctors, who madly per-
formed about him, not having informed
Of the cause of the lads suffering.
They are all at logerheads now what to
call the case.
Judge: .'Nhat have you TO say,
prisoner at the bar?n Prisoner: '"I was
hungry, your honor. and stole the loaf
of bread to save me from starvation.
| had no money, and could get no
work to earn money. L" That
will do, sir. State prison for life. Yours
Is q bad case, l must set an example.
You should have known, sir, that the
lecture-field vas open TO you. Officer.
take him away"
Passenger on n ferry-boat in very
rough weather: ..Why do you want the
fare to-day before crossingP We always
pay when we get to the other side"
Boatman: "Wen, you see, sir, our Or
ders is, In bad weather the boatman
must be pertikler careful Now look;
with this 'ere gale a-blowin', how easy
and then what 'ud become Of the faresP"
Tableaui
why in tho name of common sense
no you talk so muchP" asked a man in
a Galveston BARRIERS chair, as the artist
stopped TO strap his razor, because,
sab, If / CUB you a chance to get a word
In while I was Shawn yer chin, you
mout say sumfin, yerself, and den. yer
zee, l mout be liable to cut yer-as I
was sayin' Kernel Andrews, OBJ de Sum
set route, has got n eb tho hand
soonest faces I ever drawed IA razor
obcr. ! used to shave him cherry MORN
IN when he libbed down heah in Cal
weston. foah he went to San Antoine. As
was ayin'. Kernel Andrews" etc.