The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1881-10-06
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Sad spectacles-Broken giasses'
Men who are born equal-twlns.
onen,ng a boil-taking of the tea>
kettle lid.
A civil engineer-ohe "nos'''
tramp a free ride on a apoose
speak,ng of avarice and generosity
:. AZ beo as stingy as the wasp!
Riches may have wings, but 'hey
don't seem to fly this way.
The upright paragrapher renders un-
TO scissors the things which are scis
sors.
Raer does not intoxicate, but it caus.
&c a man to be mistaken for a case OF
sunstroke.
The clown who got caught in q heav'
rain without an umbrella, was u damp
fool, wasn't he?
IT is never too late to mend. Which
10 wbv The cobler never has your boots
done at the time promised.
Plump girls are said to be going out
of fashion. If this is true, the plumN
per the girl the Simmer her chances.
II has been established at last that
the only disease to which you may not
n second time be liable. is the ne.that
kills first.
Ill natured people are simply vexed
with themselves aud don't know 1t.
They tell us that the world has made
them morose
Women BARRIERS are multiplying. Ii
they have pretty mugs they will, he
doubt, keep their customers in hot wa
ter all the time.
A mans body is supposed to be com
posed Of water to tho extent OF three
fourths, except in localities, perhaps
where beer is plenty.
The scientists have taught us that IN
sects have their affections, and nov
some one knows a mosquito that was
mashed on a young lady.
"Do YOU drink brandy?' "No, l Dc
not drink brandy, but my brother An
dy, who is quite q dandy, drinks bran
dy, mixed with rock candy
She was sweet sixteen when she re-
ceived a box of caramels from her deal
Claude Augustus, and she was SWEEP
sickteen when she turned her tired eyes
upon its emptiness.
The peers on the Land Bill. English
noble Lord: "Think it's all night.
Irish noble Lord: mot all right, bu'
a great deal better than if it had beer
any worse"
"Will the coming man use boil
hands?" is a question asked by q sc'en-
tiic exchange. We don't see how the
coming man can use both hands unless
the coming woman drives the horse.
A brial couple from Washoe valley
at breakfast in q Reno hotel, %converset
as follows:lHe-"Shall | skin You {
pertater, honey?" She-"No, thanl
you, deary, 1 have one already skun.'
War history: "What is the greates
charge on record?" asked the profGsso
OF history. And the absent. minded stu
dent answered: Seventeen dollars TO
hack hire for self and girl for twt
hours"
There is a good deal of gush over
driver on one of the street cars in Kan
sas City, who was formerly a lawyer
This is all wrong. If the man is trylnI
to do right now, why bring up his pas
life again?
He had lost his knife and they aske'
him the usual question: 500 you kno'
where you lost ito" Eyes, yes" he re
piled. ''of course 1 do. I'm merel
hunting in these other places for it t
kill time"
A stern wheel boat going mp the riY
er in sight of Pittsburgh kicks up sue
a dust that she looks like a frame bull
ding on fire. The river is so low tina
ever turtles, terrapins and tadp0ie
can't get q drink az the bar.
A good churchman was commenting
Mt the breakfast table on the conduc
of one of the vestry, when he WIS sud
denly interrupted by his hopeful, aget
seven, exclaiming, Papa, Why don
you pull down your vestrymen?"
1t Is difficult to get the noise ont of
boy. OF course you can get some nois
ont of him; but you never can draw Of
his entire supply. Ten Fourth of Ju
Tvs and three circus parades woult
leave him just as full as he was whel
he began.