The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-06-03
What Becomes of all the Promising
Children2

In q very thoughtful and suggestive
inquiry rs to the reasons why .'promis-
ing'' children so seldom turn out as pa
rents and friends anticipate, the phila-
delphia Public Ledger discovers potent
cause of failure which parents will find
worthy of serious consideration. After
speaking of the more familiar ways of
spelling children by unwise management
or improper training, the Ledger says:
The truth is, we need more fore
thought and less self-indulgence in the
training of our youth. We please our
selves too much, and study their future
too little. 1t is SO easy and pleasant to
crafty our own vanity or ambition by
Stimulating and exhibiting them in points
where they excel it is SO hard and COM
paratively tame to exercise them in what
they are deficient, and to foster their
most meager abilities Yet until educa-
tors acquire the necessary self-control
and patience to do the latter; until they
can work quietly and steadfastly without
display, and fix their aim on future re-
suits instead of present glitter, the most
promising children will continue to sink
down into inferior men and women.
The qualities that are the most attrac-
tive in childhood are not by any means
the most valuable in maturity. We
look for determination, will, decision of
character, firmness in the man, and re-
fuse him our respect if he have them
not. But when the child exhibits these
qualities, even in their incipient stages,
we are annoyed, and, perhaps, repulsed.
Instead of rejoicing in his strength of
will and guiding it into right channels,
we lament it as a grievous fault in him
and misfortune to us. It is the meek
and yielding child who cares not to de-
eide anything for himself, in whom we
delight, and whose feeble will we make
still feebler by denying it all exercise.
Yet, when he grows up and enters the
world and yields to temptation, and,
perhaps, disgraces himself and his
family, we look at him in i'm
beetle wonder that so good a child
should have turned out to be so bad
man, when, in truth, his course has
only been the natural outcome of his
past life and training. The power of
standing firm and going alone we know
to be desirable in the adult, but the
child seems more lovable who is utterly
dependent upon US, and we therefore
strive to cherish this dependence, shut
ting our eyes to the fact that we are
thus actually uniting him for the life
that awaits him. Concentration, too, is
q quality that we admire in the adult,
but greatly undervalue in the child. We
prefer that he may be easily drawn away
from what he is engaged in, and quick
ly turned from one thing to another at
our pleasure; and while we praise him
for his ready obedience, or rebuke him
for seeming absorbed, we are really
breaking down the power of cencentra-
ton and depriving him of its invaluable
results.
It is true that many things are suita-
BILE for manhood that are not for child
hood, but this is not the case with men,
tai and moral qualities. If it were there
could be no such thing as consistent
preparation for good and useful life.
Every quality that the man or woman
needs is incipient in the child and needs
development and exercise. Our part in
his training is not to cherish in him SIM
ply what is most attractive to ourselves,
or what feeds our own and his vanity,
but rather to study his future needs and
to help him to supply what is most lack
ing. It is where he is deficient, not
where he excels, that our earnest efforts
are demanded. Not until parents and
teachers realize this SO fully as to identi-
fly with it their highest interest and
pleasure in their charges will promis-
ing children fulfill their promises, and
the question no longer be asked, "What