Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1881-05-10
GENERAL noTss.

Barren mountains are not worth ascent
fCambriige Tribune.
Never hit your mother-in-law, but if
YOU do hit her, give her whack she'll
never forget. Philadelphia Sun.
Jones, who goes to the "Lodge quite
often, says Mrs. ]. could give the N hilists
several points in blowing up.-[Boston
Transcript.
Among the rude tribes in America, Africa
and Australia it is forbidden that man
should ever see or have anything to do with
his mother-in law. And yet we boast of
our superiority to those people.
Prince Bismarck says that Emile lola
and other French novelists are responsible
for the running away of his son Herbert
with another mans wife. France seems to
be getting even with Germany.
Wendell Phillips is called by John
Bright e the greatest orator who speaks
the English tongue. We are waiting
anxiously to see what kind of dish of
taffy Wendell will prepare for John.
A New York paper, in highfalutin edi-
torial, compares Senator Malone to a ship
sailing grandly over the ocean. Malone
has OLE duNauIdRc Ofct VIC ouip. liz Soh
raise breeze whenever he wants to.
First member feeling twiuge of con-
SCIENCE Z" l say, Tom, what a long time a
man does waste during the term playing
poker. Second ditto mot catching the
point "Yes, especially while shutting. "
(Columbia Spectator.
When st. Petersburg policeman arrests
a man he doesn't grab him by the collar
and shake him until his teeth rattle, as
they do in CAicsgo. There's no telling
how many percussion bombs he may have
in his clothes. Il Inter Ocean.
Overheard during soft musicl Schneider
tat the piano)-Und how vos you git on
nit dat poorly vidder! She keep Gin
gasthaus, I tink. 1 have been myself there,
eat der bratwurst. Schnaps All, himmel
ind day vos sausage if you like. Vel, she
Is gone dead, OATS all.-[Judy.
The deepest coal pit in England thst
of the Ashton Moss Colliery Company
has, after six years boring, reached the
desired coal-beds The sinkings have
reached depth of S97 yards Including
the six.foot seam of coal) and the borings
have gone down to Lose yards.
An Aberdeen, Scotland, gentleman. care
fully questioned the opticiau "What
number must Iwear after these cease to be
strong enough y "This one, said the
optician, showing him another pair. "And
after that." J" This" "And after
that After that-after that-you will
need little dog and a string
The Manchester Examiner, comparing
the balance sheets OF the Conservative and
Liberal Clubs in that city, shows that the
Tories are in debt to the extent of f2, 049,
while the Liberals have paid for all they
possess in the way of furniture, fixtures,
etc, and have a balance in profit of e.. 06O.
The Tories gained only Al new memkers in
the year and the Liberals gained ll5
Angry wife thine, . A. M.)-t'I Is that
you. Charles ~ Jolly husband" Fash
me. Angry wife" Here have 1 been
standing at the head of the stairs these two
hours. Oh, Charles. how can you:" jolly
husband tbracing up)-" Shtandin' on your
head on t'shtairs i? Jenny, Pm surprised.
How can 1? By Jove, can't. Two hours,
too 'Stronary woman FL cincinnati Ga.
zette Put in by a Wicked Partner.
At the Castle of Simonetta, twenty
miles from Milan, a surprising echo is pro
duced between the two wings OF the build
ing. The report OF a pistol is repeated by
this echo sixty times; and Addison, who
visited the place on a somewhat foggy day,
when the air was unfsyorabe to the expert
ment, counted fifty repetitions. Ii
Is stated that Che sound of one musical in
strument in this place resembles sres'
number playing in concert.
The following medical sensation comes
from Georgia "a young man from Merri
wether county had tree fall on him while
out hunting, striking him on the back o
the neck. He was unconscious for thirty
six hours, and then he was found to b'
paralyzed from his neck down all over hi;
body. His head, all his senses there, hi
brain and his mind seemed as good and al
active as ever. and he lived in this helpless
state from August, 1879, to December
1880"