The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1881-10-08
beats"
Types OF the Impecunious and Impor.
tunate.

The editor Of the ys~ Manhanan Bagie was
seated in his favoritc position, viz with his chair
tilted back and his feet resting his desk look
ing over performance In faolscap-a recent com
municai"n ON the political situatfon-when n tall,
bald. headed figure glided into the apartment, I'M
announced and unheralded.
The figure was not attractive one. II was
shabby and out at elbows The general ultra seed
incss extended TO his hat, through which daylight
could be distinctly seen his trousers, which had
been cut of short, were long past the prime Of ere,
and his boots must have been quite comfortable
during the summer months. they we're SO well ven
tilated.
The patty's nose was rubieund, and the only
things about his head that gave Il anything APP
preaching TO m imposing appearance were the
mented those members. The editor Of the Bayie
eyed the new -comer. who placed one hand upon
his heart, and held his hat In the other, and said
in q rich, sonorous voice:
81 believe you are the renowned and able Editor
Of the .ysr Manhanaa Bayie, paper which I may
say In my humble opinion exercises most bene-
fcious influence over the world ut large"
"Yes," quietly murmured the Editor.
at Is the only journal ever study"
"Yes,"
at Is wrote in ane English language"
ayes"
~ admire Il. It's policy Is always straight; Il
10 n stalwart friend Of the poor man. II provokes
encouragement TO the millionaire. Its unaniea-
bl. to bad: popular feelings"
"You will. trust, pardon this intrusion, but /,
like yourseif, attn n literary man We air brothers.
I've been told that you was u man who was always
ready to distend helping hand 60 n brother in n
hole"
'who told you thaty askel the Bayis man.
Every prominent man connected with the press
of which was in better days an honorable mem.
Der, . iongways ahead Of most Of them answered
the seedy individual.
slave you given up literature, or has literature
given you up," inquired the editor.
"Pernit mo to explain" and the stranger cleared
his throat. 81 betrayed great genius in my YOUTH
and my parents concluded 10 send me TO q univer-
si,y. Misfortune came upon 'em. and they could
not do Il. I commenced my career in literatoor
by Obtaining subscribers to a work In monthly
parts on the History Of the Bible in the United
States. failed isnononousiy and tried my hand
nj dry goods-but brains will OFT, and found
that dry goods was not my forte I became .
journalist. and might perhaps have reached the
proud acme Of position that inspires you-but
my benefactor shufied on his immortal corpse
Here the seedy speaker wiped away q tear. ayes.
81 think you'd better 60 that way. too. - far as
this Office Is concerned, said the editor, quietly.
| And the Literary beat withdrew.
rng ynEg.rass nEAr.
"Ah, Mr.. Sioeum, you are the agent Of South
Northern Pacific Railroad"
| EYES. SIR"
"Ah dear me. ali. am the Reverend IIezekiah
Skiplitte Of the Methodist Episcopal Church, and
| all ! thought I'd just look In 10 see you"
| "Yes, sir
81 want my yearly pass renewed over your
| route; and all, you sec, there's synod going 20
| meet at Ashbarrsl tomorrow. Alb, and should
just like to introduce my er-in.law. Mr.. Jer
emiah cantbug"
.Glad to make your Acquaintance. SIR
| "Ah. yes. Hes OF our church. III just ask you
for ps.s for him. too. lies In our church, sir"
"a pass for him :"
"Yes. All, thank you. Yes, one for him and
his wiie--my sister, you know-and four chiliren.'
"wife and four children, ?"
"IIs wants to 20 to the Synod, too. and TO give
hi. family iistletrip:: they didn't get out Of town
| this summer, you see"
az guess I shall have TO write about getting .
pass for your brother in-law and his family. The
railroad Amt got anything to say against clergy
men. but this Il kinder rubbing u In"
"Ah, no not at all, I assure you, Mr.. slocum.
The opposition line wouldn't object. I fear ah,
you Amt got the Grace. young man."
The pass was obtained.
TnE nEAr THAT NEVER TREATS.
This type 10 the eommonest form Of the whole
family Of Beats-the Beats' r"igaris, ~ u we're
although his methods vary considerably.
No living man ever knew him 10 disburse the
smallest sum for drink Of any kind for any per-
son other than himself.
| He never has change when In eompany-oniy q
ten dollar bill; and that hs hasn't.
On some occasions u almost appears ~ n thers
we're not the slightest chance Of his being able 10
shirk HE treat but he s always equal TO the situ'
| alton.
lie knows the character Of the men he may hap
pen 20 be with. and the policy he has adopted "a
avoid giving them . chance Of partaking OF his
hospitality or generosity vas never known 10 fall.
II must not be supposed that We desire 10 de-
fend the system of promiscuous treating-on the
contrary, We are opposed 10 u.
We do think, though, that. - long - u IL tol.
Grated. the participators should bear their fair
share Of the burden.
They are sitting In the Bodega. The gentle.
mon present not tsetotalers. for they have had
three bottles Of champagne.
Perhaps Il was enough, or more than was good
Tor them.
Il Is now our Anti-treatng Beats turn 10 obtain
reputation for ibsraiiiy At the smallest possible
| cost.
acome," says he. "went you fellows have bot,
| tie Of wine with mel won't drink another drop
myself; I've had too much already, bat some o.
you can stand another glass, guess. Cant yer 2
And the Anti.treating Beat makes move as u
about 20 20.
Amer 80 pressing. an invitation, there 10, o
course. unanlmous "NoT which breaks up the
party, and scores another victory for this Beat'
! sseeessfal meshed---Fsek's AansaL
observation-disclosures --"what was the fate o.
Abslg" Boy-"Killsd BY Cain In elub." School
mistrsss-aNo, with club. Do you knew wha
aelub isf' Boy-"Yes, mum sor,sr free ant
! easy like father gOss TO o nights"