The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1881-03-10
Nine OWNS.
BY CARL rEElZ Et"

ych Of der two 10 you 'ore best?
Dis vas said more ua dozen times of ne,
Ven my 6arng,, init uite.goNn 50 White,
Va tn,Fins by Gretchen aud ne
which one won Il YOU said might been dookcn
Ven der cold.Gngered Death he would say,
"Gif me der one yot YOU luic best
Dot, dci one would dock me away"
So dock 'cm togedder on mine lap,
Und kissed 'cm urd shgweczed 'em so tight,
Und wondered Offer he vas now ask me
yich one could gif him to night,
Leedle Gretchen vas handsome und shweed,
Nit a heart dot vas shuckful init lOfc,
II shOnc her eyes out all der While,
Like der shtars on der llcncns aborc.
Lecdc Carl vas shmall child yoost now
Der fiery picture Of Greichin, NINE frow,
lie vas shendlc uni kind, und so lofng,
As his arms make mine meek round yOost now.
Und here on mine lap dhcy are seddin.
Repeaden dot lecdlc cfeuing brayer
Dot dhere mutter vas taught 'em to said,
To make 'em goot und hafe Heafenly care.
But how lofe me dot OWNS vat got;
Mine Faddcrl yoost shpare me dot test,
vich one Of dose darlngs vas dearer--
yich one ofcs me der best
No lady with any refinement will use
her husbands mecrschaum pipe to drive
nails in the wall.
Solomon had seven hundred wives
That's the way the wiSest man Of his
time Utah-lized women.
Curiosity Shop-"Oh, what lovely
vase. It's antique, is it not?' mo,
ma am. its modern What pity!
it was so pretty.
Princess Louise has written a piano
forte solo, THE Doctors Galop." II m,
let's see There never has been doc
tors galop in that family, we believe.
A newspaper, gushing over recent
painting, says: lin front stands rus
tic maiden, wrapped in her own
thoughts. The scene is laid in lati
tude degree south.
She had sued for breach of promise
and the verdict of the jury was agains
her. WANT to poll the jury?" she wa
asked. Yes, do. Jes' gimme thu
pole for two minutes
Etiquette writes to us to inquir
| it, in our opinion, it would be prope
for him to support Il Young lady if sh,
was taken with n faint--even if he
, hadn't been introduced. Proper young
man, certainly prop her 10y all means
1t is proposed to connect the roya'
residence Of Great Britain with the min
isterial quarters, Her most gracious
majesty, with receiver at her ear and
Scowl on her face, IL she shouts
Hello, hcllor' is "A picture for a pain
ter.
Mile. X. poses as young lady,
though fully fifty years old. The Other
day they were telling in her presence q
story OF the last century. Il don't be-
lieye it, cries Miss \. Then deny
it," says the speaker; "mademoisellt
was there
A shy Philadelphia girl, having ;
| lover she was afraid wouldn't stick
covered her lips with glue and invited
him to kiss her. Owing to the fact
that she had previously posted her faith
er when to pounce into the parlor, th'
plan worked admirably.
"My wife won't even hear of my 90
ing to the theatre with another lady
said Gallagher Ragbag didn't seen
to construc Gallagher's remarks Alright
for he said Wont Ell? Don't yor
be too sure of it. | thought my wifi,
wouldn't but she did, and had fear
full time about it,"
"What u tiresome thing that Mrs
Smith ism exclaimed Mrs. Brown. 81
called there to-day, and she ran on so
telling about her new carpet, and hel
new house girl, and her baby's two
teeth, and new bonnet, that | didn't
get chance to say word about my
new sack, or our parlor furniture, OF
Freddy coming down with the measles
or Sarah James dyspepsia, or Uncle
Charles rheumatism, or how Bridge
burnt that batch of biscuit. Oh, She;
such a tircsomc thing"
| - . .