Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-01-30
Young Skidmore's Trouble.

Young Sk1dmOre put IN his regular
Sunday evening with his sweetheart,
but he had not gotten half through with
the stereotyped inspection of the photo
graph album when she noticed that an
air of peculiar abstraction weighed upon
his usually smiling countenance.
"What's the matter, Gustus? Don't
you feel well ?" she inquired, tenderly
disarranging the part in his hair, as is the
exasperating feminine custom.
"Oh I'm all right" he said. "Did
you take in the matinee yesterday"
and he glanced uneasily around.
"Tell me what ais you, " she persisted,
gently. "You seem to have something
on your mind what is it? Gustus, tell
me-"
81 haven't got anything to tell, " said
SEdmore, holding first one shoe up to
the light and then the other, after which
he shook his head thoughtfulIy.
"Great heavens I see it all !" ex-
claimed the now fully alarmed girl:
"You've been specializing in stocks and
have-have used the Office money. Oh |!
Gustus, to think that you should ever be
a defaulter.
81 hayen'tdone anything of the kind, !"
said the young man, Indignantly. 'I
only feel-that is, I kinder-how do you
get on with your music lessons, Tlda ?"
cob! Gustus, don't talk in that
strange way. If anything dreadful has
happened tell me at once. Don't keep
me in suspense !" and she laid her head
on his shoulder and sobbed bitterly.
"Tilda," said the young man, after
moment devoted to firmly but gently re-
moving her head and selecting another
seat. "You don't really care very much
for Limburger cheese, do you? [ sup
pose YOU could give it up for my sake ,"
"Why, Gus" but she stopped sud-
denly, as a terrible thought flashed
through her mind. Her lovers intellect
was never very strong, her pa had often
said, and now he had at last gone insane.
She must be cautious. "What are you
locking under the sofa for, dear?"
she said as sweetly as her agitation
would permit.
"Oh III thought I dropped some
thing" he responded, absently. "There
is nothing the matter with the sewers
hereabout, is there, Tilda?"
"No, L think not, DEAR" she replied,
determining to humor him, as she had
heard was the proper course with in
sane people.
Haven't got such a thing as tumor
about you, I suppose?" he continued
wistfully. "You wouldn't conceal such
q thing as tumor from me all these
wears, would you, Tilda?"
"No darling" she replied, trembling
violently and edging toward the door.
"Then I guess I'd better go home
now-letters to write )" and he advanced
for parting embrace.
Don't touch me keep off help !!
murder !' yelled the terrified female,
jumping behind the sofa, while the
household came swarming to the scene.
"What yer mean ?" roared the father
of the family, shaking the astonished
young man by the collar. "What did
he do to you, Tlda?"
81 didn't do nothin'," yelled Skid
more, backing into corner. 81 was
going home because couldn't stand it
any longer"
'Stand what, you lunatic ?"
"Why, this terrible odor. I'm
blamed if it isn't just the worst smell 1
ever struck in my life." And the des-
perate young man sat down and nearly
sneezed his head off.
ooh, is that all ?' exclaimed the OBJ
iect of his affection, much relieved and
then, after good deal of blushing, she
whispered something to her mother, who
whispered something to her father, who
led the young man into the entry and
explained that in consequence of the
prevailing epidemic they had thought it
best for Tilda to wear couple Of car
bolic and camphor pads about her per-
son.
"Why, to besure!" said the overjoyed
lover, smelling his cuffs. 'Imight have
known. How stupid of me-"
And he returned to the parlor, from
which the family of his beloved filed
out again, leaving the two treasured
souls to disinfect as one.-Sa'o Fran
cisco Post.