The Elk Mountain pilot., 1881-04-21
JOHNNY SPZLLKZES ANl
THE LEELSLATIIPE.

j
of about twelve summers, has just re-
TUNED from brief visit to Austin,
where he has an uncle. Johnny must
haze spent good deal Of his time in
the Capitol, and have associated with
legislators, for he abounds in all man.
ner of legislative terms and express
sions. His legislative knowledge first
cropped o1t when he wen. to the door
to answer a ring of the bell. The
family clergyman was getting up a
subscription list for an orphan asylum,
and had called 20 get a subscription.
He a3kcd Johnny if his father was in.
"1he Governor is engaged Just now
with official business Of great import
ance. He is fling away batter cakes
and other internal improvements.
The clergyman stared and said:
"Te!' your father would like to
see him. | want him to subscribe to
get up benefit for the orphans" :"
"It's no use for you to introduce
that bill, besides you ought to know
that the Governor has no jurisdiction
in such matters You can get some
body to introduce your bill, but l shall
vote against it. 1t IS unconstitutional
to vote tie money Of the State to re-
lieve orphans. OF course | am in
favor Of orphans. They are good
thing to have in the family, but l don't
propose that you shalt open door to
fraud and corruption by appropriating
any OF the cash balance for that pur-
pose. Why should the orphan be re-
lieved when the boy who has the
mumps is overlooked? Then, again,
how are we to tell whether they are
o1phans7 They may have three or
four mothers apiece for al! this Legis-
lature knows to the contrary. What
security has this House that the Or
phans Will ever see the money, any
how? Just as like as rot you viii
spend it in riotous living. You had
better withdraw your motion, Parson,
for after this Legislature has sat down
On the crippled Confederate soldier,
it is not afraid of whole asylum full
Of orphans. ! close the debate and
the door," and Johnny shut the door
in the clergynan's face. The latter
gasped for breath, but passed on, won
der;ng that he had not head Of
Johnny's insanity before.
When Johnny came back to the
breakfast table, his father asked him
who was at the door.
1t was Rev. Goodman, but sat
down on him in the committee room.
| don't think he will bother this House
any more this term"
Johnny's father remarked that send
ing the boy to Austin had made fool
of him, but he thought he knew 4
remedy Johnny replied, carelessly,
that there had already been too much
special legislation in that family, any
how, and strolled off to school.
His experiences at school were very
discouraging When he was called
off to say his lesson, he wanted to re-
fer the whole matter to the Committee
on Sponges and Slate Pencils. The
teacher asked him what he meant by
talking such foolishness.
"Tnat, sab, " said Johnny, striking
an attitude and thrusting one hand in
his vest, "that, sab, is question that
can only be answered outside of this
hall. sir.
The teacher replied:
"Just as the gentleman wishes.
After adjournment we Will have a joint
discussion"
And SO they did. When Johnny
csme home he was the sorest boy on
Galveston Island; but ne was still
chock- full of legislative lore, for when
his mother told him that his father had
left word for him to clean up the yard
he laughed contemptuousiy and said !;
"Ha! Another message from the
Governor. believe the old man fan
cies he can run this Legislature, but
he will find out about that before the
session is over"
When the old man came home, the
first thing he wanted to know was why
that ward was not cleaned up. Johnny