Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1881-12-30
NO. BOG

where is your fourth castle: do not behold
any rastle on board at all.
Fourth castle! Fourth castle! What do
YOU mean. Secretary" asked the amazed
Commandant.
..whv. in all the sea tales, I've read of the
fourth castle" said the Secretary.
'.Oh, you mean the 'fokestle, said the
Commandant.
1.-The whatg" said the mystiAed Secretary.
"Fokestle. fokestle--place where the crew
live. Down there" said the Commandant.
"why, IT'S hole" said the Secretary.
Captain, do not approve of vour keeping
your men in such dark, damp cellars. They'll
catch the rheumatic"
"And do the sailors really climb mp there,
asked the Secretary, pointing aloft-"up
those little rope ladders? How perilous,"
.They do" replied the Commandant.
81 must improve on that" said the Secre-
tary. ~ will introduce great reform in the
service. l will save the life of many gal
liant tar. Let all the masts be provided with
hydraulic elevators"
ut shall be DONE" said the Commandant
"Cal the officer of the WATCH" suddenly
an aside; "Tll show him that ] know some
thing about ships"
The officer appears.
Officer said the Secretary, "show Ne
your watches. want to see ifthey're all In
good order"
"Sir, the watches were all sent on shore
this morning to be cleaned" replied the OIL
Ger of the watch.
That's pretty work." growled the Secre
tary. "Why, where's the ships jewellery
How do you suppose you would have the
correct time IL you were to keep an engage
ment with an enemyy"
1--WE should take the sun previously" re-
piled the officer Of the watch.
81 do not wish you to take the Sum-"
thundered the Secretary. II will not allow
the Sun to be taken on this or any other
United States vessel. You do not need the
Sun. Ii is a villainous, vicious paper-hriRht,
and edited with certain amount Of Satanic
ability, admit. but demoralizing to the cor
rect discipline of the navy. lfyou desire to
take anything, take the Evening Post or the
Philadelphia Ledger. Take a good, heavy
paper that ill serve to ballast both the ship
and your minds. Well. sir. If you have no
watches on board, show us your clocks. You
are officer OF the clocks as well as the
watches, are you not ~
"Aye, ave, sir P" said the officer Of the
watch.
Il! /, What in the world makes you so
egotistical in expressing yourselfy" Why
don't you say yes, sir, like white man p
said the Secretary.
"Yes. sir. But l am sorry to say that II
was necessary to reef the pendulums Of all
our clocks during the last gale, and they've
not been shaken out vet
.And what's all that banging forf" said
the Secretary. ''Is it a naval engagement"
1--WE are firing the customary salute of
nineteen guns in your honor" said the CON-
mandant.
''Oh, you are. are your Are there bullets
in any of emp Are they pointed this wayr
don't like it. II makes me nervous.
shall have that practice stopped. Command
ant, after this fire anvils or toy pistols, and
save powder. Dear me. IL Chester would
only let me stay in, how cheap could run
our navy. would abolish the ships alto
yether. We've got hardly any now. and so
far those are concerned that we have, we
might as well have none at all. Good morn
ing, Commandant." ."--Ner York Graphic.