Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1881-07-01
F. u N


The SWEET GIRL GRADUATE.-sCan
I see the editors" she asked, looking
around for him, and won dering what was
going on under the table.
Sch! yes, I'm him" responded the edi-
tor, evolving himself and slipping cork
into his vest pocket. "What can do for
you?'
I'm student at Packer Institute, y re-
sponded the blushing damsel, land have
written little article On Our School Days
which would like to have published in
the Brooklyn s'Eagle," if you think it
good enough"
Certainly" replied the editor. gazing in
unconscious admiration upon the beauti-
full face before him. 'tDoes it commence:
'Our school days! how the words linger in
sweet cadences on the strings of memory!'
Is that the way it runs?"
ssWhy, yes,'' responded the beaming
girl. :.
''Then it goes on !: How we look
forward from time to time when we shall
look back to them!'''
ssHow did you known"
.sNever mind,' said the editor. with the
engaging smile which has endeared him to
the citizens of Brooklyn. ''After that
comes: $50 sunshiny, SO gilded with the
pleasures that make youth happy. they
have flown into the immutable past, and
come to us in after life only as echoes in
the caves of sweet recollection Ism
that it?''
SIT certainly ISL answered the aston
ished girl, radiant with delight. GLOW
could you know what had written?"
'sThen it changes from the planissimo
and becomes more tender: The shadows
gather around our path. The roses of
friendship are witheriug; but may we hope
that they will bloom again as we remem-
Der the affection that bound us here and
made lis it, Hope on, hope ever?' " asked
the editor.
s'That comes in further on. You had it
nearly right. 1t is The dun shadows close
around us. The flowers of friendship are
sleeping, not withered. and will bloom
again in the affectionate remembrance Of
the claims that bound US SO lightly.'''
''Strange that I should have made that
mistake" said the editor, musingly. Il
never missed one before. From there it
goes: 'SchOolmates, let us hope all our
days shall be as radiant as those we have
known here, and may We pluck happiness
from every bush, forgetting never that the
thorns are below the roses, and plying
those whose hands are bruised in the march
through life.'''
s'That' ftp exclaimed the delighted girl
"And then comes Hope on, hope ever.''
''Sure's you're born!" cried the editor,
blushing with pleasure, and once more on
the right track. ''Then it runs, And as
for you, teachers, dear!'"
Yes, yes. you are right" giggled the
girl. 81 can't see how you found me out
Would you like to print it?" and her face
assumed an anxious shade. 9
Certainly" responded the editor. ''Ill
say its by the most promising young lady
in Brooklyn, the daughter Of an esteemed
citizen, and a lady who has already taken
high social rank.''
''That finishes the school commence
ments at one sWoop," sighed the editor
glOomily, as the fair vision foated out
Cant see how l made that blunder
about the shadows, and roses, and friend
ship. Either I'm getting old. or some of
these girls have struck something origl-
nal. Here, Swipes, tell the foremen to
put this slush in the next tax-sale supple
ment." and the editor cit III his hair for
the cork, and wondered what had happen
ed to his memory Brooklyn Eagle.
How He WAS LAID.-lt was in a
smoking-car on the Hudson river road
A New Yorker was exhibiting an inven-
tlon to several gentlemen, when an cid
farmer heaved sigh and said:
81 never see such a thing without want
ing to weep"
Nothing about this invention to weep
over that I can see,'' replied the inventor.
"Wal, it sorter calls up old recollec-
lions. Twenty years ago this fall thought
I had fortune in my grasp. Yes, sir, l
believed had struck the biggest thing
since steam was brought into use.
"What was it 20
lone day when the old woman was hat
down with her lame leg had to cook my
own dinner. After I'd got the pancake
batter all fixed could not find tie greasy
rag the old woman used to rub over the
spider. Sort o. abs entrminded like pick
ed Up piece of raw turnip from the table
and used 1t instead. 1t worked to charm
no smell, no smoke, no stick"
He paused to wipe away tear, and then
continued:
s'There was an immense fortune. l fig
ured that 100000 creased rags were used
in this country five months in the year,
Fifty thousand barrels of grease were used
up greasing spiders. Over $100, 900 wasted
and gone. One turnip would make six
greasers, 1000 bushels would make enough
to supply the country. All that was need
ed was to cut them up into fancy style, af-
fix handle, and go to supplying the de-
mand at 10 cents each.
''There was money in it.''
mo, there wasn't. bought one hun
dred bushels Of turnips, $56 worth of wire.
got two men to go to work, and then l
took greaser and went over to Vermont
to see how il would take-they would not
have it. They had something more SIM
pie and much cheaper
s'What could it have been?''
''They spit on the spider!'' replied the
old man as tear made break down his
nose and was swallowed up in the dust on
the floor.
Little Pearl sat thoughtfully regarding
long row of dolls before her, her tiny