Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1881-05-21
The Loyers, Chair.


There are eccentric men In the west. remarks
tne New YORK Times. The same Is true of all
parts OF the country, but western eccentrlcity
Senops anus isse IN ways that are peculiar In
some unnecessary Indiana town, the name Of
winch may be omitted furnishes q conspicu-
Gus and characteristic Illustration OF this great
truth, and his name deserves to be remembered
among those who can appreciate eccentrIcty
OF truly original type. Mr.. Beale has
De s sRe M never
that she is good girl, weighing one hundred
and thirty three pounds. She is greatly re-
spected BY all who know her, and Is undouot-
father might be honestly proud It is, however.
part OF Mr.. Beale's eccentr1city to assume that
when young man comes to spend the evening
With young lady the two usually occupy only
single chair. This theory; which Is doubtless
founded On the unsup stantial basis OF the
alleged comic columns OF Chicago journals. IT,
OF course, utterly untenable by any man OF
sound Judgment, but the eccentric Mr.. Beale
nrmly believes 1t. He cherishes. moreover
views OF the striesest nature as to the way IN
and he has often informed Miss Beale that q
community Of chairs is one of the most wicked
0f inc idSas OF modern socialism. and that no
ten feet OF her Chair. His daughter has in
variaply replied, Eyes. Pa. l think you are quite
ais NJ put tne eccentric man has never put full
In order TO test 1t Mr.. Beale has on several
occasions abruptly entered the back parlor on
OUT uSy cNcuLuS WQ0n ne knew mat young MT.
Ban low, the local druggists assis amt. was &C.
cupy1ng the room In company with Miss Beale
On each occasion he found the young people
tar ding and gazing intently on cromo W ich
ct cOrateS the wall just above the CRATE Two
chairs, distant from one another about atteen
TT. were visible, but there was nothing 10
Although he thus failed to discover any evil
dence that his daughter had departed from his
Instructions, MI. Beale was far from being con-
designed his now celebrated patent adisstab!e
chair, mechanical invention intended to re.
strain young people from any tendency to
The patent adjustable chair does not present
any hovel Pecunalit1es. to the eye, but it Is 30
constructed that when an excess OF weight is
placsd upon 1t. the seat sinks TO the floor. and
forth weird and piercing shrek. 1t can be
adjusted so as to sink with almost any desired
according to the weight Of his daughter and of
her various visitors For example, Miss Beale
weighed, as has been said, one hundred and
thirty, three pounds and Mr.. Barlow weighed
Mr.. Beale adjusted his patent chair so that
1t would sink under weight OF two hundred
pounds, II Is evident that the weight of the
young lady or the young man alone could Eot
cause the whistle to sound, but that their COM
bined weight could not be placed upon the
G ea a ;thour setting the peculiar machinery
weighing 2O4 pounds, who occasionally called
on MISS Beale, and on nights when he was ex-
point OF the chair at 800 pounds. the merit o.
the invention ia obvious and Mr.. Beale felt
when he placed his patent adjustable chair In
the pack parlor on Sunday evening. just before
MIR. Barlow's arrival, that he was now certain
TO learn whether his daughter was In the habit
OF implicitly obey Ing his counsels.
ABOUT nine O'CLOCK the Ingenious father, who
was IN the dining. room waiting earnestly for
tne whistle, heard the peculiar and unmIs-
taxable sound OF That treacherous device. aud
instantly rushed into the back parlor. He
FOUND Mr. Barlow lying across the collapsed
ch sa ana MISS Beaie standing at an irreproach-
aole distance from him, anxiOusly inQuirtng IL
ne was hurt. He said he had accidentally
caught bis foot In the hearth rug and had fallen
over the chair. This explanation could not be
might have been collapsed by such an accident.
The disappointed father withdrew, taking his
cha1r With him. and admitting to himself that
his daughter was not to be caught with any Or
binary trap.
But in spite Of this failure the adjustable
chair has recently been brought promipentiy
before the public. When the Presbyterian
synod met last month In the meeting house at
tenGed py mi: Beale, and there was scarcity
OF chairs on the platform, he sent the sexton to
his house with instructions to bring all the
chairs ne could find: The adjustable chair was
cullarlties, made haste to personally offer it to
the Moderator. The chair, as subsequent ex
animation proved, had been adjusted to seat
wen three hundred pounds, and It so happened
tnat the Moderator weighed just three hundred
and one When, therefore, after delivering an
Impressive speech, the reverend gentleman sat
down, the assembly was Mortified to see him
slhk rapidly to me floor, While the shrek OF the
nom the unhappy man. The subsequent trial
and expulsion OF Mr.. Beale for sacrilegiously
playing adangerous practical joke on the Mod
IiaI ism into contempt in the eyes OF the world,
has made the pecularities Of the chair IA mlliar
To almost every one.