davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

"Will you accept a tract, young
man ?" asked an elderly lady, reaching
out one Of the thin pamphlets that
have cheered SO many q sad hour.
"Well, ma'am," replied the young man
pleasantly, "if it's good large tract,
in an eligible situation, improved and
graded, with three story brick house
on it, all the modern conveniences, five
minutes walk from the horse cars,
churches, schools, etc, thank you,
don't care if do. I'm a stranger in
Boston, ma'am; often heard of your
unbounded hospitality, liberality, and
all that sort of thing but bless me |!
| never had any idea Of anything of
this kind" AS she made no reply, but
stood transfixed with astonishment, he
passed on, with pleasant smile that
widened into grin by the time he got
out of sight of the old lady, who was
at that very moment remarking -
Poor young man! what a disappoint
it must have been to him p'-Boston
Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

"Do you think you are going to die p
inquired the coroner of the dyer who
had fell into vat of boiling indigo.
81 feel very blue,' responded he feebly
sand | think III dye no more" How
ever, he is still olive and the coroncr's
evidence was not red.-New York Com
mercial Advertiser.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

An apprentice boy who had not
pleased his employer one day came in
for chastisement, during the admins
tration Of which his master exclaimed :
"How long will you serve the devil p
The boy replied, whimpering; "You
know best, sir; | believe my indenture
will be out in three months"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Sacrifice is the law of being. 1t is a
mysterious and fearful thing to OBJ
serve how all Gods universe is built
upon this law, how it penetrates and
pervades all nature, so that, if it were
to cease, nature would cease to exist
+. w. Robertson.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

The Cheyenne Sun wants to know il
we ever saw an Indian Pawnee's over
coat? No; but we have known one to
Sioux for peace. But real simon
pure Indian would no Mohawk his coat
than you would. Not as much per-
haps, because you have one to hook and
he hasn't.-Baltimore Every Saturday.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

The real and personal porperty in
the United States is valued at 10000
100000 The last three figures repre-
sent the value of the property owned
by the editorial PROFESSIONALISM York
Commercial Advertiser.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

A New York female society thinks
the paragraphers of the American
press lack reverence, and that they
should be prayed for. Perhaps they
should, but Judging from the number
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

An old man-of-war sailor, who had
lost leg in the service of his country,
became a retailer Of peanuts. He said
he was obliged to be a retailer because,
having lost leg, he could not be
whole sailor,-Somervile Journal.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

A publisher in putting up his paper
says it will contain stories by well
known authors and other interesting
reading matter" The question is, who
is interesting reading matter" and
what sort Of a story would he write?
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24
THE GREAT
BURLINGTON ROUTE.

tB- No other line runs Three Through Pas
senger Trains Daily between Chicago, Dcs
Moines, Council Bluffs, Omaha, Lincoln St
Joseph, Atchson, Topeka and Kansas City
Direct connections for all points in Kansas.
Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming. Montana, Me-
yadn, New Mexico, Arizona, Idaho, Oregon and
California.
The Shortest, speodiost and Most Comforta-
bio Route via Hannibal TO Fort Scott, Denison,
Dallas, Houston, Austin. San Antonio, Calves
ton and all points i'm Texas.
The unequaled inducements offered by this
Line TO Travellers and Tourists, are as follows:
Tho celebrated Pullman O6-wheeD Palace
Sleeping Cars run only on this Line, c., b. &
q. Palace Drawing-Room Cars, with Horizons
Reclining Chairs. No extra charge for Seats
in Reclining Chairs. The famous c., II. q q.
Palace Dining Cars. Gorgeous Smoking Cars
fitted with Elegant High-Backed Rattan Re-
volving Chairs for the exclusive use of first
class passengers.
Steel Track and Superior Equipment COM
bined with their Great Through Car Arrange
ment makes this, above all others, the favorite
Route to the South, Southwest, and tho Far
West.
Try It, and you will find travelling luxury
instead OF discomfort.
Through Tickets via this Celebrated Line
Tor sale at all Offices in the United States and
Canada.
All information about Rates of Fare, Sleep
ing Car Accommodations, Time Tables, &c,
VIII be oheerfully given by applying to
JAMES II. WOOD,
General Passenger Agent, Chicago.
". J. POTTER,
General Manager, Chicago.
5O2w4O
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

In speaking of a newly welded pair,
a gentleman said of her husband -
"The trouble with John is he has no
mind Of his own" "Oh, that will
make no difference; Sarah will always
be ready to give him piece of hersp'
responded the lady.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

"Never iron chintz dress on the
right side,' says Mrs. F. f. Benedict
in the Philadelphia Item. Are we to
infer that the left side only is to be
ironed ?-Cambridge Tribune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

The Buffalo Commercial Advertiser
mentions what may be safely set down
as the worst case Of spelling Of recent
record. 1t occurred in a mot is" of a
"sellybrashun" to be held on the shores
Of Lake Eary," and mentioned the
occasion as "guble." This word
troubled the editor good deal, but
with rare perspicacity he at length re-
solved it into "iubilee."
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Fond mother.-"Is blowing Il fish
horn likely to result in injury to your
boy" "You wager it is, ma'am, if
he blows it near US and we can catch
him. Boston Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24
ADvrpTYsywe ns-vs

line. " '''''
Local Notices, ten cents per line each insertion
and all notices continued Tor three months or
longer, discount OF % per cent.
Advertisements unaccompanied by written or
verbal directions will be published three month >
Advertisements, under contract ordered out be :
fore expiration Of time, will be charged full rates
No paper discontinued until all arrearages are
paid, except at the option of the publisher
Transient advertisements must be paid in ad-
vance.
BsS- Terms, CASH, payable quarterly.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

"Do you think you'll be able to pull
through ?" anxiously inquired the
needle of the thread, Eye guess so"
was the curt response.-New York
News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

of uncredited items in the columns of
some of our exchanges, it appears to
us that there are paragraphers who can
prey for themselves.-Somerville Jour
nal.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24
A Lecture to Young Men
On the Loss 0f
MANHOOD

lecture Un the nature, treatment and radical
cure OF seminal weakness. or spermatorrhona indnc
ed by self-abuse, involuntary emissions impotency
nervous debility, and impodiments to marriage zen
efallyi consumption, epilepsy and fits; mental and
physical inoapacity, &c.-By ROBERT J. CULVER
WELL, NJ, D., author of the "Green Book" &C
Inc Worid-rcnowned author, in this admirable lee
ture clearly proves from his own experience that tho
awful consequences OF self-abuso may be effectuay
removed without dangerous surgical Operations
bOugies, instruments, rings cordals pointing ont
mode OF cure ut certain and effectua by which
every sufferer, no matter what his condition NAV be
may cure himself cheaply, privately and radically
thousands. NV
Sent under SEAL in plain envelope, TO any addres.
postpaid, on receipt OF six cents or two postage
stamps. We have also sure cure for Tame Worn
Address, THE CULVERWELL MEDICAL co,
81 Ann St., New York, n. Y; Post Office Box 45s6.
J0iyl Wv
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Put away your linen duster,
Grab your ulster from the rack,
For the Manitoba wavslets
Soon will interview your back.
We can hear their chilly murmurs,
On the breeze borne every day,
And they turn our thoughts TO chilbrnins
And the in-hu-en-zi-a.
Detroit Free Press
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

A receipt for lemon pie vaguely adds
"Then sit on stove and stir constant
ly." just as if anything could sit on
a stove without stirring constantly
EX. Burns says: 1t makes some diff
ference if it is n coal-ed stove you sit
on. Wood not that be so? We shall
kjndle at reply.-Cambridge Tribune,
Such puns arc sufficient to kindle the
smouldering embers Of mans wrath
and make him mad as blazers.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Scepticism is slow suicide.-Emerson.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

"What," shouted q North Hill ora
tor, i'll burst Of fervid enthusiasm
what was Burlington twenty-five years
ago " And thin man, with de-
spairing countenance, got up in the
audience and replied feebly: "Burling-
ton, wasn't it?" And then the orator
said he hoped that his cleave might
roof to the tongue of his right hand if
he ever went into caucus with such
lunatic.- Burlington Hawkeye.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

A young bride, being asked how her
husband turned out, replied that he
turned out very late in the morning,
and turned in very late at night.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Advice to married men: Put a
safety valve upon your self-esteem il
you don't want to get "blown up"
-Binghampton Republican.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

HNu N Yourselves by making money when
"U liz golden chance is offered, thereby
Railways keeping poverty from your
"uII door. Those who always take advan-
~ hAl tage OF the good chances for making
money that are offered, generally be-
come wealthy, while those who do not improve such
chances remain in poverty. We want many men
women, boys and girls TO work for us right in their
own localities The business will pay more than ten
times ordinary wages We furnish an expensive out
nj and all that you need, free No one who engages
fallsto make money very rapidly You can den Ole
your whole time 20 the work. only your spare me
ments Full information and all that is needed sent
free Address stinson & Co., Portland Maine 4s9yI
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Circumstances alter cases." said an
unsuccessful lawyer" and | wish l
could get some cases that would alter
my circumstances. ."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24
WIT AND HUMOR.

WIT AND HUMOR.
Let others seek a cool retreat
By seashore and by mountain;
Wore content TO have a seat
Beside a soda fountain.
Cambridge Tribune.
Kernel Sellers-peanut venders.-
| Springfield Sunday News.
Wonder if a noise annoys an oyster
Springfield Sunday News.
A perfectly square man is round at
the right time.-Whitehall Times.
Many people who hunt for happiness
are continually finding fault.-Ex.
Gold is an idol worshiped in all
classes, without a single hypocrite.-Ex.
This is the season for making tours.
As the poet says: "To-ur is human" +"
-Ex.
A citizen of Cincinnati gets his beer
before he dies, and gets his bier after
he dies.
The falling Of the leaves is an au-
tumatic arrangemcnt,--Baltimorc Every
Saturday.
John, what is that scar OH your
chinY That scar? Oh, that's
relic Of barbarism.-Ex.
80, -
The Concord institution is not a high
school of philosophy, for nothing is
ice cool this weather.-LOwell Courier.
Richard Briggs, the crockery ware
dealer, Is q very set man. A dinner
and tea set man.--Boston CONNER
cial Bulletin.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

We are told that mans body is
three-fourths composed of water, but il
is hard to believe this while looking al
q Cincinnati man.-BCston Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

waiter (bawling to the cook -
"One roast lamb and one potato" Old
gentleman "No, no! Not so much
lamb, and more potatoes. ."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

a St. Louis editor found a nickel on
the street and wrote a halfcolumn cd
itorial on "Our Increase of Wealth" ."
Boston Globe.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24
Canada Southern Railway,

.gEr q sTszf, 'al..-',
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Richard Briggs, the crockery ware
dealer, Is very set man. A dinner
and tea set man.-Boston CONNER
cial Bulletin.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

Kernel Sellers-peanut venders.-
Springfield Sunday News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1881-08-24

The Concord institution is not high
school Of philosophy, for nothing is
ice cool this weather. Lowell Courier.
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1881-08-05

5TATEMENT
EXPENSES or MONTGOMERY COUNTY
FOR THE YEAR 1881.

Published By order Of the County Commission
ers for said County, IN pursuance Of Section
Nine Of Article Tcenty- Eight Of The Code Of
PuJiic General Lars, phieh prouides that
" The County Commissioners shall make out
and publish annually, in ut least two news
papers published in their respective counties,
if there be two, Detailed, minute, and accurate
statement Of the expenses of their said counties,
specifying therein each particular item of en-
penses and for what and TO whom paid and
shall also deliver to the Sherifs of their re-
spective counties as many copies of said state
ment as there are election districts of said
county at least ten days before such general
election, ard the Sheriff shall, within six days
after the receipt Of such copies, set up one of
them at the place of holding elections in each
election district
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1881-08-05
TAKE NOTICE.

By nm Actof the General Assembly Of Ma
rylaDd passed al January Session, 1876, u
discount OF five pee cent. will be allowed on
all taxes paid on or before the first ofSeptem-
Der, OF four per cent on all taxes paid on or
before the frs, Of October, and three per cent.
on all paid on or before the first of November.
No discounts will be allowed after November
first.
JOS. A. TANEY,
July "a, sl Crk TO Co. Comm'r rs.
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1881-08-05
INC HoUs
House and other on

'N'i'i 'tiitl Olll
ls location imncdiat
hin two miles Of Die
frop0litan Branch raj
u very desirable ri
LE hs prescribed /
OF the purchase mo
! tho day Of sale an
ial iustallmenls paya'
? respectively from I'll
FRED payments to be 2,
Us OF the purchaser .
rely or eureties to i
'nstee and to bear it
nIc; ind upon the RI
'r s'tles By the GoutI
he whole purchase N
:, proper veyancc y
&c,
! the cost Of the pure
J rs B HENDERSON
ffus
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1881-08-05

to momO Knit y6wprmsW We have
h k b here g 10 he
bwnt to be eouplo d san t h al % will $50 nps low he same
dnf wWk be yh W "a and II % is in k give al
pntumyo with mills sh U d o gd kh low rate a other bh h
ymi pNpho Mont yo byrmg puhyd
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1881-08-05
Justices OF the Peace.

The following amount Of fees were paid to
the Justices and deducted from their ac-
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26
sUMmoss.
STATE OF coLoRApo.l..

STATE OF COLORADO
FWEMosr CouNrY. @
In tho County Court within and for the Coun-
~ OF Fremont nforcsai6, to tho December
torn, A. ID. 1rsi-
W. MARY CuRBY, risintiG.1
cHAs. cuiiby, Defendant. ~
NE People OF the State Of Colorado send
re 'Cn AtiEs cuRBY. dcfendap,. above
hamcd: You are hereby required to appear
i1n an nction brought against you by the above
named plaintiff. In the County Court OF the
County Of tromont, II being tho 9th Judicial
District OF the state OF Colorado, 10 answer
70 the complaint Med therein. within ten
days, exclusive uf tho day Of rcrsicr, " served
within this county,; or n served out OF thls
county, but In the said judicial District with
in twenty dayst othcrwisc within forty days:
or Judgment by default will be tNkou sgainat
you, according tothc prayer ofthe compinint.
The said action II brought for divorce on
the ground of nduitry nnd for tho care and
cuatody of DAVID G.. CURLY, tho child OF
said parties ~ Will more fully appear by tho
complaint on fiie h~rrin TO which rufcfencc
and you ~rc hereby rtlined that " you fall
70 pppsNr sndsenswcr tho said cpinpiAlnt -
above required, the ~aid plaintiff will apply
toehe qourt fos the relief demanded In The
6issa Sndsr my hand e..d the se., q the
SCountyCourl, Within and Tor the said Couu-
~ - FreRaonts this l2th day AZ iQhcr. \. d
s}ssn - GMdAs; adAs "a = XAtpo, r...,
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26
Ao..A n.v,t.t

clergyman of Bergen, N. Y, strong
temperance man, suffered with kidney
trouble, neuralgia, and dizzinesss al
most to biindness;over two years af-
ter he was. told that Hop Bitters
would cure him, because he was afraid
of and prejudiced against "Bitters."
Since hfs cure he says none need fear
but trust in Hop Bitters. sc13.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26
ASSAYS FOR THE WEEK.


Last week 92,232 immigrants land
ed in New York.
The Irish land court is reducing
rents about 20 per cent.
Snow storms prevailed throughout
the eastern states last week.
The French cabinet has resigned,
and Gambetta is forming new one.
Onterio province, Canada, has lost
over Sl0,000,O00 by bush fires the
past season.
The Santa Fc railroad was badly
block AIDED by the snow storm in Col
orado, Kansas and New Mexico.
Gladstone has been threatened
with assassination. In his Journeys
he is accompanied by strong guard.
General Grant denies an alleged
'over-shadowiDg" influence with the
new administration He regards Ex-
Senator Cbaffee. of Colorado, op-
posed TO him politically and has new
err had financial relations with him.
Cannon, the Mormon delegate to
Congress, " no was refused a certifi-
cate of election py Gov. Murray, on
the grounds of not being a citizen of
the u s., has just been declared an
alien by Chief Justice Hunter at Salt
Lake City.
The illness and burial of President
Garfield involved an expenditure Of
about S34i 900, of which sum S247,-
600 were spent at Cleveland, aud
800 900 during his struggle for life.
The doctors bill will be about $685.
600, and the average daily expenses
were about 81 ,25j.
The recent terrible foods along the
Mississippi river destroyed property
TO all estimated value Of s6a9, 900 in
the Warsaw district in the Indian
Grave district, $3.50. 600; in the Sny
Island district. 81 ,000, 500 ia Quincy
, bay and ,i;y. $50, 600; around Alex
sndrin. Missouri, SIS. .0oU; 10 rail-
roads, 81 ,06o,0o0 TO land- i'nncdi-
ately below Qaincy, $4,000; total,
5000, 600.
During the last sixteen years the
people of the United States have paid
81. .435, 600 In interest ON national
debt. They have also paid s75s, ,651.-
S9J on the principal. or an aggregate
payment of So .523, ,o9a ,395. The debt
could be entirely wiped out by 1925
II the people should pay each year.
from now until then, u sum equal to
the average annual payments during
the past fifteen years. The debt per
capita in 1865 was $685., and the
ssnounf of interest to be paid per
capita per annum $i.e0. Now the
debt per capita is Ss7.74, and the an
nual interest to be paid per capita is
$i.5G.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26
Peculiar Paragraphs.

According 10 the best Information,
there are about 100000 sheep in
Texas.
For two years he demand on the
Philadelphia mint for bronze cents
has exceeded the coinage BY $4,000
go to- so,0oJ,o0o per month.
The greatest length of the United
States from east to west is $500
miles greatest breadth, from north
to south. 800 miles; average breadth
/ 200 miles.
or the 1852 immigrants IN this
country for the first seven months of
1881, Iowa received i.4o5. Wisconsin
1, credited with II ,0es and Minnesota
with 1853.
In England and Wales IL has gener-
ally been supposed that large farms
were the rule. but recent statistics
show upwards of $4,000 out of the
acres each or under. The farms above
1000 acres number 500. Iu Scotland
out of so. 10i holdings $3.50 are of
30 acres or under, and 20 only exceed
1000.
a remarkable stampede is In pro-
gross toward the Benz river in Boil
vim. unexpiored until last winter.
when DR.. T.. II. Heath assembled II,
and discovered vast forests of chin
coma and caoutcbouc. Fully 10000
men have since gone there, and the
export of rubber alone has risen from
$4,000 pounds to $4,000, with promi-
ses of 10000 next year. DR.. Heath
Is sanguinc of finding rich deposits
of precious metals and medicinal
plants along the Madre dc Dios.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

San Juan! San Juanl Tourists,
miners and others contemplating q
trip 10 the mining regions, should
not forget to take with them bottle
of Renne's Pain-Killing Nervine to
have on hand in case of sudden acci-
dent or sickness. A few drops used
in water for drinking. neutralizes the
effect of the alkali. and prevents bow
ell complaint. sc15.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

For dyspep,ia aud liver complaint,
yon have printed guarantee on ev-
cry bottle of Shiloh's Vitalizer. 1t
never fails to euro. For sale by
Beecher g. Co. self.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

PePsin, Rhubarb, Mandrake and
Are the active ingredients of
Browns Pepsin Tonic. Give this
wonderful Dyspepsia remedy q trial
and be cured. For sale by Earle &
Pedlcy and Beecher & Co. If
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

Arc you made miserable by indi-
gcstion. constipation, dizziness, loss
of appetite, yellow skin? Shiloh's
vitalizcr is a positive cure. For sale
by Bcechcr & Co. sci4.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

Most Complete Printing and Bind
ing Establishment in the west. AT
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26
n, uu,, ne so.

For all who use Browns Pepsin
Tonic say II Is sure cure for Dys-
pepsia aud Sick Headache. Try IL.
For sale by all druggists in Colorado.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26
elOOO REWARD

FOR any caes q n.ind, nlesdtne. leehlaai N
ssss,:d & ESS rIIr y ~ ~ 1:IS9
J. r HITLER. ~. b.. 1lB Arch e.rss~ FhiisdeE
phia. ~. None genuine yl1hoot hiu sigma
srai eio.ss hsve Il or WI, SCI eof you. D: heid
BY Deechsr 4 Co slol8
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

Shiloh's Cure will Immediately re-
lieve Group, whooping cough and
bronchitis. For sale by Beecber &
Co. scli.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

A Nasal Injector free with each
bottle of Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy.
Price so cents. For sale by Beecher
q GO. ec14.
The Fremont County record., 1881-11-26

Last week 92,2a2 immigrants land
ed in New York.