The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1881-11-18

THE BANkER'S CLERK.
There is q very amusing story told Of
bank president who used 10 have his clerks
watched by detective after Office hours. 50
that he could keep himself properly posted
as to any fact which might render any one OF
them liable 20 appropriate funds belonging
to the bank. lie had hauled up several OF
the clerks about their improper and extrav-
agaut expenditures, and was, as the story
goes, sitting in his private Office waiting the
appearance of the new assistant receiving
.ellar Ferdinand Algernon we're de We're,
who had been duly shadowed and reported
on 10y operative p. @, of Judas d Gehazi's
secret service. The clerk having entered
the president Office, was acc0sted with
Young man, what is your salary?'
'.Nine hundred, sir, and / can scarcely
live on that
'No- / should guess not ] suppose YOU
know am cautious man, and now ! viii
say that from inquiries made touching your
habits, I have been led to form the opinion
that you are spending money altogether too
fast for the trusted employe Of a wealthy
bank. Now, do not defend yourself Let
me tel yoI where you went last evening
You left this office at four p H., and with
the messenger walked into the Pearl and
drank brandy smash. You played billiards
from thlrty-seven minutes past four TO forty
two minutes past six p. NJ, and diued on
Blue Points and prairie chickens and Impe-
rial. You went TO see Aimee in opera b0ufe,
went out several times between the acts,
and before the piece was through you walk
ed down and lost S5.15 at keno. You said
keno was a foolish game and YOU could nos
see any fun in it, after which you drowned
your sorrow in several juleps, and took the
thirty minutes past one owl car for your
room on North Eleventh street. Now. I
want 10 know If You think that proper con-
duct for the servant OF a bank ike this 9'-
Now, the other clerks on arriving at this
point, had one and an admitted the truth OF
the operatives report, and, after begging
forgiveness, had promised imm ediate and
substantial reform. But this clerk was
made of different stuff and said
4 don't think anything at all about it,
That report is a tissue of falsen00ds from
beginning to end, and as / happen to know
was made by Jim Mugeius, an ex-c0nvict
and son Of a thief.
If you want TO know how I spend my
evenings shall be pleased to inform YOU,
sir, at any and all times, but now this matter
of fidelity 10 the corporation has come up,
let me read TO You, sir, my special agents
report OF how sou spenty esterday afternoon.
Attwo O'Clock you met the notary of the
bank and told him to send around the re-
bate on his commission for the year, and he
met yeu at the Jim Crow saloon a little later
and gave yog S566.16, for which YOU thanked
him, and told him the directors would not
change their notary for the present Then
on leaving the bank son met Bertram, the
contractor for the stone and brick work Of
the now bank building, and he handed YOU
a parcel and said heres your whack of the
divyy, AT which you smiled and invited him
10 drink He declined. Atseven p. NJ. y0u
told your wife that there was meeting of
bank presidents at the Liudel that night
and YOU wouldn't be home till late. But in
stead Of going TO the hotel You went to a
house on Walnut street, near Twenty second,
. where YOU passed the evening with the pref
ty widow you call Lena, first giving her a
watch and chain, with the observation that
you had promised your wife a watch long
ago ana hadn't given it to her yet You
reached home about half past twelve A. NJ,
and had to ring n bell because YOU had
dropped your latch key on Lena's carpet
You were surprised duuug the night by
burglars. to whom Lena bad given the KEY
TO your house, and while they took nothing
of value because your dog scared them of,
you were So angry thar You complained TO
the Chief OF Police that the policeman on
your beat was of no account whereas y0E
were yourself 10 blame. And then-'
That will do, said the president /
see you are smart young man. 1t is not
necessary to discuss these trivial matters
BY the way, what did you say your salary
was 90
Mine hundred, sir"
''Weil, it Will be 81, 500 after this, and III
make you cashier as soon as old KreItzer
goes on mis- next drunk
Thank you, sir
ooh, that's nothing to he thankful for
just 90 along and attend TO your work. and
p Id take care OF you. And by the by, you
needn't say anything to the other clerks
about my foolishness with that widow"
And the clerk sailed Gus.