River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1881-12-29

Were they very much disturbed in
Heidelberg that summer the war broke
out p | asked.
She flushed and hesitated.
You were home-weren't you ?"
al can't remember" she said, in
a constrained voice.
"Why it is only five years ago, my
pet; don't your memory go back for
five years ?"
"0h, further than that" she said,
quickly; but Malcolm / have been
puzzled about it very often. / will tell
you, there is just that one year ] can
not remember anything about"
Great heaven ! could it be that she
mad lost her reason during that time
and been in an insane asylum? The
thought came to me like a flash of
electric light, and thrilled me with pain.
Was there the faint of insanity in my
darIing's blood The doubt stung me.
How else could she have lost year
out of her life?
Were you sick or sad when you re-
member your life again ?"
"Oh, no; we were full of hope about
the new country, for We were coming
here"
"And did you ever talk to your IA
Their about it?''
"My dear Malcolm, would you believe
it that never discovered till lately that
year had slipped out of my life IN
such a mysterious manner? 1t was
fixing dates about the war that did it,
and then poor papa was in the church
yard"
And she looked so sad that / kissed
her, saying;
Never mind about that lost year,
darling. | viii make the coming years
so bright that you will soon forget it.
81 don't care for it now, if you
DON'T" she whispered, with her head
upon my shoulder; only it makes me
strange, unlike other girls"
so you are unlike theml" | ex-
claimed, in a lovers rhapsody; $50
much sweeter and Purer and saint
Her." and so on through the rosary of
love.
But still, once in a while, like dis
cord among the sweet notes, the thought
of that year would recur to me. knew
all my darling's life, all her pure, sweet
thoughts, and | grew jealous of those
closed and sealed pages in very I'M
reasonable way.
One night, week before our wed
ding day, which was fixed in the rosy
month of June, | sat at my window idly
looking out into the moonlit garden,
when thought struck me-the diary
why had L not thought of it before?
Surely that would throw some light
upon this year. own | did not take
it up without thrill, as if | were dis
turbing some dead and buried sorrow.
/ had very curious sensation about it,
a cold chill creeping over me, as if
were entering q grave. And was | not
about to interrogate the dead about the
living? | turned over the pages with
out interest till l came to certain
date, and even then | was not thorough
ly interested till saw Hilda's name as
follows:
"July 12.-Fm glad Hilda likes her
school. 1t was struggle to let her go,
but best that she should not spend her
young life with an old man so absorbed
in science. She is out of the way of
lovers, too, and will be better guarded.
began to fear an interest in young Won
Observation-Disclosures young spendthrift
as he is-has just the kind of romantic
appearance, with his large, melancholy
dark eyes, that would fascinate my fair
little girl. But Madam Gerhard will
look after all this-the child is only six
teen-too young to think of love, and |
would rather lay her in her grave than
give her to Won Eberstein-she knows
it, too.
august FL am drawing near to a
wonderful discovery, and | tremble as
one who stands on the shore of the in
finite at this new shell of knowledge
that / have picked up. Why should it
not be that one might learn to forget.
On, the torture of memory to the sim
ner, it is the hell that is the penalty of
his sin. If one could"
"Well, | did not finish ON this topic.
was so eager to go on about my dar-
ling, so l hurried over the leaf, till /
saw her name again, and then dropp-
ed the book paralyzed with terror, for
this is what | read:
September 30.-God in heaven have
mercy My child is gone She went
out on some little shopping expedition,
they write me; she was seen walking
under the trees with a young man.
Ach. Himmel! know who he was
may God Almighty punish him forever
and that was the last. Oh, Hilda
oh, my little white dove Oh, my
heart is breaking But | will find her!
[ will kill the miserable wretch, the"
There was a sudden break here, and
| could have read no more. My heart
seemed to stand still, and l wondered
if madness had not conjured up the
whole. l passed my hand over my
eyes, stared out into the moonlight at
the familiar scene, took up q rosebud
that Hilda had given me that evening,
and dropped it again and crushed it
under my heel. Was she so false and
such a consummate actress, too? How
innocent, how guileless. All ! my brain
burned and every pulse beat painfully,
bat | picked up the book again. Per-
haps there was some mistake. | must
know the worst. There was a long
hiatus-no entry till
January 31.-Thank heaven | have
found her-so miserable, SO abject, that
I have only wept and taken her in my
arms and whispered that, though all
the world turn against her, her fathers
heart and home are open. She has
told me the whole story-the lovers
meeting, and how he wiled her away
with lies about a priest waiting. No
one would know my girl row, and no
one shall have a chance to see her; the
neighbors do not know she is i'll the
house. But when find the accused
william who has wrecked her life"
Here followed the most blood curd-
ing threats and VOWS, but | could not
read them, hurried on.
February 10 10 not write much
here now-what have | to tel? have
forgotten all the other wrecks of hui
.nanity in the one that sits beside my
hearth, looking with listless eyes on
all. | cannot rouse her to anything.
Life seems at an end for her. The
horror, the amaze, seems to have
turned her to stone, and in this marble
image heart pulses painfully, brain
dazed, yet forever recurring, in terri
BILE monotone, to one experience
throbs on. My God, | must do some
thingl / waken each day with horror
that shall find her dead by her own
bandl She was so white a thing. Oh,
God, thou knowest that she shoulders
at herself
March 20.-I laid the first snow
drop of the year in her hands this
p,Or;ng and she hurst into tears