The Concordia eagle. [volume] (Vidalia, La.) 1873-1890, 1881-05-14
HUMOROUS.

great lnk-conYenlence-The PRINT
ing press.
The Rome Sentinel calls a poster q
stuck-up thing.
"What do you take me for?" said the
arrested man to a detective. - Boston
Post.
The man who has his sisters and his
cousins cannot be too careful of his
haunts.
A man never looks so much like red
handed villain as when he is told by the
photographer to "look pleasant"
Said a bachelor philosopher: my
friend conducted his future wife to the
aitar-and here his leadership came to
an end"
Lives there man with soul 80 dead
who never to his neighbor said: "Well,
is this cold enough for you?"-- Yom1gs
Gdzette
"What," asked the teacher, "was the
greatest obstacle Washington en-
countered in crossing the DelawareY"
And the smart, bad boy thought for
minute and then made answer: 1.-THE
toll-man."
1t has been discovered that the skin OF
cat prevents neuralgia. 1t is also as
serted that throwing bootiacks at the
felines tends to develop and strengthen
the muscles of the arm.--Philadelphia
| Chronicle.
What is the first thing 10 be done IN
case of fire 2" asked Professor Stearns
"Suethe insurance company" promptly
answered the boy at the foot of the
class, whose father had been burned out
once or twice.--B'rtingtOn Hrokeye.
In review of the past lesson at Sun
/ day-school the question was asked:
"What did God do on the seventh
| day." Answer: HE rested" What
else did He doY Promptly little
eight-year boy, "He read His news
paper"
why, I'm so glad you've come. Did
You know that I've been worrying about
you, John, all the EVENING"" That's
! just what / married you for 1t is
pleasant to think that there is some one
home worrying about you" Somehow
this view of the matter didn't exactly
coincide with her ideas of marital
4. II
I'm union is strength" Ifthis applies
to the postofice department, it ought to
be rather strong. Among the postofiices
III this country there are twenty-five
Unions, eleven Union towns, five Union
valleys. and seyenty-eight postoffices
that have Union for the first word of
their names followed by hill or burg or
mills, or some such word, thus making
l29 p0stoffiees in these United States
whose names contain the word Union.
While q Chicago girl was leaning over
the railing of the veranda one night,
singing " I'm Waiting, Ny Darling, for
Thee" her long-legged lover sneaked
out of the shrubbeIy. Birdie -
Amanda" They embraced. "Have
YOU missed me-" she murmured
Missed you, my angel? does the lone
" dove miss" But there came dull
hollow thud, as if some one had hit an
old stump with maui, and he shot
out in the darkness, while q voice as
deep Us bass horn said: Birdie has
gone, Amanda, and you can turn the gas
out in the parlor and 60 TO bed"
sCALEY STORY.
\ major loved maiden 70,
, His warlike heart was soft as Do
He oft would kneel to her and say
Thou art Of life my only Re
"Ah ! if but kinder thou would'st be,
And sometimes sweetly smile on Nj
Thou art my life, my guiding star,
love thee near, ] love the Fd.
, my passion cannot control,
Thou art the idol of my Sol"
The maiden said "0h, fie ! ask pa.
How can you 60 on thus? Oh, la"
The "major" rose from Bonded knee,
A And went her father for to 81.
. The father thought no match was finer,
This major" once had been minor
They married soon, and after that
1 Dwelt in ten rooms all on Zone fat"
So happy ends the little tale,
For they lived on the grsndest ''scsis-"