Smyrna times., 1881-08-24
Current Comment,
PHILADELPHIA EVENING NEWS

Ahgersoll has repented and will not
lecture against Christianity again fo, loo,
than fifty cents seat.
1t costs 81 200 to burie resnectabl,, i,
New York. Mourners come home in thar
CITY, but people must have 'em.
James Parton says There is no worl,
done in the world which expends vitality
us last as writing for the public"
MacOn, ia, wants canal, more cotton.
mills and cheaper beer. but if they can
get the latter they will try to worry along
without the canal and cotton-mills
raul dc Cassacnac, the Bonapartist
editor of the Paris Pays, has fought 10
duels in twenty-five years and now feels
so brave that he would not be afraid to
act as umpire in a base ball game.
clerks at the Continental never smile
when a stranger in new suit of store.
clothes comes in breathlessly at half-past
eieVeh and remarks that he hopes he has
not Kept dinner waiting. They are usc 10
| it.
Chicago water has to be boiled before II
is mt to drink. Part of it is then allowed
10 cool, while the rest is seasoned with
salt and pepper and served hot. 1t makes
hne soup.-PhHGdelpbia News. Did von
ever taste it?
Don't oTerwork yourself in warm
weather; keep cool and take things easy.
say the doctors; but when YOU follow
'helr advice and in consequence don't
make money enough to pay their bills
they get mad.
How do you like student walters >
Boston Post. Very much. They are no.
lite, attentive and do not expect fees
Pvt It IS pity that some of them do not
pay less attention to Greek and more TO
English grammar
The windows of every city house should
be filled with flowers 80 that the rooms
will become bowers of loyeliness. Be
sides that, tiOwerpots are cheaper than
hootjacks and just as effective for silencing
midnight serenaders.
a suit of rooms at one of the Long
Branch hotels costs 5000 a week. They
are hired occasionally by families who de-
sire to amaze the inhabitants. and are
wiling TO live on cOrned beef and cab.
bage all the winter to make up for it.
II Was fantastic conceit of Leonidas
Robertson of Madison, Ind, to array him
self in his wife's dress and bonnet and
then hang himself-Hartford Post. He
had probably been reading jeff Davis
book and got mixed OH the question of
costume.
A Georgian editor says: Gold is found
in thirty-three counties in this State, sill
yer in three, copper in thirteen, iron in
torty-three, diamonds in twenty-six, whis-
Key in all of them and the last gets away
with all the rest" That is just about the
way of it.
Joaquin Miller writes most perplex
ing hand, in which all letters are made in
pretty much the same way and most of
them are omitted. And maybe this ac-
counts for his poetry. The printer sets up
what he pleases and lays it off on Joaquin.
Boston Post.
Let the man who thinks the world
would go to smash if he were out of it"
go into the country for few weeks and
when he returns count up the friends who
were aware Of his absence. He can count
them on his fingers and won't have to use
both hands to do it with.
Men are SO scarce at Cape May that
ladies have TO dance with each other.
Edison should invent an automatic fop
warranted to dance everything except the
racquet. If well dressed, the machines
would have big sale, and few persons
could distinguish the cOunterfeit from the
original.
The two pug dogs belonging TO New
York woman who is boarding at one of
the Long Branch hotels are brought to
the table in nurses hall three time daily
and fed with the best of everything from
silver plates, while children in her native
city are dying at the rate of two hundred
a day in New York tenement houses.
Just such fools rs this woman are re.
sponsible for the bitterness which fills the |
heart of the wretched and in hard tunes
leads to riots and moh law.
California has perpetual ice pond.
There is lake on the Saw Tooth noun
tains, at an altitude of nearly $4,000 feet,
which is constantly frozen. 1t was dis
covered in August, 1879, by party of
prospectOrs and named Ice Lake, The
sun seems to have no effect upon it ex-
cept in places along the shore. In the
course of time a city will grow up near it,
The pond will be purchased by an ice
company and they will charge tho usual
prices on account of high freight rates
rom Maine,
The present season at the Virginia
springs has been the most prosperous of
my within the memory of man, Not one