Custer chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, Black Hills, D.T. [S.D.]) 1880-1890, 1881-02-26

A cool marriage fee was received by a
Brooklyn clergyman the other day-a
lot of ice tickets.
Boston girls are not allowed to coast
on Boston common. They do not do it
gracefully enough.
The Buffalo Express evolves that
there's N such thing asa we'll running
dry. When it is dry it don't run
Detroit Free Press: A man in Vir-
ginia has discovered the eleventh com
mandmcnt. 1t is: Let them chickens
alone"
Boston Courier: When Tommy put.
n piece Of johnny cake in his pocket for
lunch he calls it an Indian reservation.
Or. McCosh, at q meeting Of the
Princeton alumni, Enthusiastically re-
marked Il see many faces here to-
night that are missing"
Detroit Free Press: The time has ar
rived when an invitation to Il wedding
is equivalent to lending the groom SO
and feeling thankful that he didn't ask
for more.
Detroit Free Press: The American
Bite society is turning out 1000 Bibles
per day. but you wouldn't believe it if
Won attempted to trade horses anywhere
in this locality.
A Mcthodist preacher, who looked on
1T "A small dancing party =. Il private
house in Cambridge, observed with
scctarian huinor that the young women
welt through their quadrilles and
wales as cravely as il they were under
couyiction.'
California proposes to treat John A.
Suffer according to scriptural precedent.
Having cheated him ont of his property,
and left him to spend his old age in
poverty and neglect. he is o to have a
monument, He asked for bread and
receives a stone.
"Say, boy. say :" exclaimed a hot-look-
ing man with ii vali>e. what is the
quickest way. to ser to the ears ~ Run"
yelled the boy; and the hOt-looking
man was 50 pleased with the infcrma-
ton that if he could have got near
enough TO the boy he would have given
him something.
Brooklyn Eagle: A young lady slip
ped on the ice and lay there, recklessly
waiting to be rescued. A clerk in a
hosiery store, who was standing near
the scene of The disaster, viewed the
with professional curiosity a
moment or two, and then exclaimed
'Prctty, very pretty, but they only cost
SO cents a pair"
Boston Post: Did you Slip" they
the old gentleman as they picked
him up. "Oh, no." he growlcd, 'of
not. | WAS tr ing to see if |
could sit down on that coal hole top
hard enough to break it. Did it just for
the fun of the thing" And he glarcd at
them ~savagclv, and they somehow felt
foolish.
Il don't believe in these secret socie-
said one lady + another. That's
very singular.' replied the other.
Your husband is Forester, a Knight
of Pytlias. and IA Knight of Honor, and
You viii have at least $4,000 when he
dies" "Hut what good does all that DO
was the fearful response, when
he never dies" And the poor creature
into tears.
Medical Journal: The child Of very
fashionable family was sick, and the
colored servant was sen to the drug
with a prescription. IF the child
can not keep the first powder on its
stomach, YOU must'givc it another one"
remarked the clerk as he pasted on the
label. you don't reckon we would
i've him the same powder ODER again,
does yer? We amt no poor folks. we
Here is q good illustration OF the
motives by which most men are moved:
A sunday school teacher said, "Now,
children, if Il boy should strike you Oil
your way to school, it would be your
duty to forgive him, wouldn't it?" YES,
ma'am,' from the whole class. "And
you would really forgive him, wouldn't
she continued. One little fellow
answered with calm dcliberation, Yes,
ma'am. ! think ] would, specially if he
was bigger than | am"
Boston Post: A South End boy in
q brake that would instantly
stop his sled. The brake was a success.
but the boy didn't invent IA brake to
stop himself when the sled stopped, and
the first time he applied the sled brake,
while fiyiEg down the hill at the rate of
a mile a minute, he kept on going some
after the sled stopped, and got his
mouth and ear, full of snow, and lost
skin from eighteen or twenty