Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1881-01-27
A HORNETS NEsr.
How one Of Them was Warmed cut Of
Winter Quarters In . Detroit
6rocery.
Detroit Free Prsss.l

AtN-A
There is an old woman on Catherine
street who delights to find case that
all the doctors have failed to cure and
then go TO work with herbs, and roots,
and strange things, and try 70 effect at
least an improvement. A !ew days
ago she got hold OF girl with 8 stiff
neck. and she offered an old negro
named Uncle Kelley fifty cents for .
hornets nest. This was sLseped in
vinegar and applied to the neck. The
old man spent several days along the
Holden road, and the other morning
he secured his prize and brought it
home in a basket. When he reached
the Central Market he had q few
purchases to make, and after getting
some tea at a grocery he placed his
basket on barrel near the stove and
went out to find beef bone.
1t was a dull day for trade. The
grocer sat by the stove rubbing his bald
head. His clerk stood at the desk bal
ancing accounts and three or four men
lounged around talking about the new
party that is to be founded on the
ruins of Democracy. 1t was serene
hour. One hundred and fifty hornets
had gone to roost in that nest for the
winter. The genial atmosphere began
to timber them up. One old veteran
opened his eyes, rubbed his legs, and
said it was the shortest winter he hal
ever known in all his hornet days. A
second shook off his lethargv and
seconded the motion, and in FIVE
minutes the whole nest was alive, and
its owners we're ready to sail out and
investigate. You don't have to hit a
hornet with the broad side Of an axe to
make him mad. He's mad all over all
the time. and he dosent care picay-
une whether he tackles humming
bird or an elephant.
The grocer was telling the men that
he and Gen. Grant were boys together,
when he gave sudden start of sur
prise. This was followed by several
other starts. Then he jumped over
barrel of sugar and yelled like
Pawnee Some smiled, thinking he
was after funny climax, but it was
only a minute before solemn old
farmer jumped three feet high and
came down to roll over job lot of
washboards. Then the clerk ducked
his head and made rush for the door.
He didn't get there. One of the other
men, who had been looking up and
down to see what could be the matter,
felt suddenly called upon to 90 home.
He wat going at the rate of forty miles
an hour, when he collided with the
clerk and they rolled on the floor.
There was no use to tell the people in
that store to move on. They couldn't
tarry to save 'em. They all felt that
the rent was too high, and that they
must vacate the premises A yell over
by the cheese box was answered by a |
war whoop by the show case A howl
from the kerosene barrel near the back
door was answered by wild gestures
around the show window
The crowd went out together. In
Gle Tom was just coming in with his
beef bone. When a larger body
meets smaller one the larger body
knocks it into the middle of next week.
The old man laid around in the slush
until every body had stepped on him
all they wanted to, and then sat up
and asked
'Hev dey got de fab all out yit?
Some of the hornets sailed out doors
TO fall by the wayside, and others
waited around on the top of barrels
and baskets and jars to be slaughtered.
1t was half an hour before the last one
was disposed of, and then Uncle Tom
walked in, picked up the nest, and
,aid:
'Mebbe dis will cure de stiffness in
lat gals neck, jist the same. but | tell
you I've got banged an bumped an
'ot down on till it will takeSa null
medical college all winter long to git
ne so | can jump off a street kyur!