St. Landry democrat., 1881-01-15
4 i" Stunning Love Letter."


although a married man. is vet I'M
satisfied and writes letters to other
mems wives. AS the following was
found near our Office. we give it
publication as being the most
amusing thing we have yet seen:
{ NEW ORLEANS, Jan. ., 1881.
Ey1 DEAR ANN1E.-Evcry time
/ think of you my heart tlops up
and down like a churn dasher. Sen
sations of unutterable JOY capcr
over it, like goats over a stable
root, and thrill through it like Span
trousers. AS gossling Swimmeth
with delight in e mud puddle. so 7
swim in a sea Of glory. Visions Of
ecstatic rapture thicker than the hair
in a backing brush, and brighter
than the hues Of Il humming birds
pinions visit me in slumbcrs and
borne OH their invisible wings your
image stands before me. and | reach
out to grasp it like an old pointer
at b ttertly. When first behcld
your angelic perfection | was be-
wildercd, and my brain whirled
around like q bumble-bee under a
glass tumbler. My eyes stood open
like a cellar door in country towns,
and / lifted up my ears to catch the
silvery accents Of your voice. Ny
tongue refused to wag and in silent
admiration | drank in the sweet
infection of love as thirsty man
swalloweth a tumbler of hot whisky
punch. Since the light of yonr
face fell upon my life, ! sometime
feel as if | could lift myself up by
I my boot strops to the top of the
Presbyterian steeple and pull the
bell rope for singing school. Day
and night you are my thoughts.
When Aurora blushing like a bride
rises from her saffron couch: when
he Jay bird pipes his tuneful lay
n the fig tree by the spring house;
hen the chanticler's shrill clarion
neraIds the coming morn; when the
awakened pig ariseth from his bed
aud grunteth and goeth for his
morning refreshments; when the
drowsy beetle wheels his droning
flight at sultry noontitle, and when
the lowing COWS come home at milk.
ing time, ] think of thee and like a
piece of gum elastic my heart seems
to stretch across my bosom. Your
hair is like the name Of a sorrel
horse powdered with gold and the
brass pin skewered through your
water falisflIs me with unbounded
awe.
] am dying to fly to your presence
aand pour out the burning eloquence
. OF my love, as thrifty housewives
pour out the hot coffee. Away from
you ! am as melancholy as q sick
Z rat. Sometimes can hear the June
bug of dependency .buzzing in my
ears, and feel the cold lizard OF
despair crawling down by back.
Uncouth fears. like a thousand min
: nows, .nibble at my spirits, and my
ssoul is pierced through with doubts
rs an old cheese is bored with skip
~pers.
II My love for you is stronger than
the smell of Coffey's patent butter,
or the kick Of q young COW, and
more unselfish than kittens first
caterwaul. AS the sQngbird bankers
for the light of day, the cautious
mouse for the fresh bacon in the
traps, q lean pup bankers after
new milk, SO | long for thee.
You are fairer than q speckled
pulIet, sweeter than Yankee
doughnut fried in sorghum molas.
ses. brighter than the top knot
plumage ON the head of a Muscovy
duck. You are candy kisses, raj.
sins, pound cake and sweetened
teddy together.
If these few remarks will enable
yousto see the inside of my soul,
and me to win your affections, ]
shall be as happy as a woodpeckel
on cherry tree: or a stage horse
in a green pasture; if you cannot
reciprocate my thrilling passion ]
will pine away like poisoned bed
bug, and fall away from the flour
ishing vine of life, an untimely
branch, aud in the coming years
when shadows grow from the hills,
philosophic frogs sing their cheerful
evening hymns, you happy in an
others love, can come and drop a
tear, and catch cold upon the last
resting place Of IONA c. W.