Morris tribune., 1881-01-06
The Spsopendykes in a Slight Furry.

Now, we haynt got much time to get
ready, my dear" suggested Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, CHEEKY, "and won't be late at din
ner party. want you to fix up SO as to be
the best-looking woman at the table. You
can get ready in an hour, can't your
with litter. "Oh, yes, I can dress in that
time, and 1 hope you won't be disappointed
in me" and the little woman began to take
down her back hair.
"YOu might get my shaving tackle for me,
said Mr.. Spoopendyke, appropriating the
only mirror. ''And now think of it," he
added, after pause, "my dress coatsneeds
a button. Sew it on won't you?"
Mrs. Spoopendyke lugged out the coat
and hunted through broken down old bag
after button that would do.
Got that button sewed on YETI" inquired
Mr.. Spoopendyke, lathering away comfort
ably.
''In a minute, my DEAR" responded his
wife
well, hurry up; want you to put those
studs and sleeve buttons in my clean shirt.
Mrs. Spoopendyke gradually got around
to these Offices and laid out the habiliment
in readiness for her lord.
''Didyou take those stitches in my gloves?"
inquired Mr.. Spoopendyke.
y
endyke, going right to work at it.
well, then, you can brush my vest and
pantaloons, and by that time I'll be ready
to have you tie my cravat."
Come, you ready?" he demanded having
assured himself that his wife had not ac-
complished single step toward her toilet.
Mot quite, DEAR" responded the lady,
with one half her hair in her mouth and
the other cracking under the brush.
whats the matter with you?" he asked.
Didn't you say you could get ready in
an hour? Didn't you hear me tell you when
I came in that We only had an hour to dress
in? What have you been doing? Why
can't you 60 as you are? you look well
enough
Il was busy fixing your things" faltered
Mrs. Spoopendyke, and couldn't do two
things at once"
"0h, no! You can't do anythingat once.
Why didn't you have my things fixed this
morning? That dress you've got on is good
enough"
Think I'm going to stand around here
| like Jug of mineral water?"
Mrs. Spoopendyke twisted up her hair
and jammed in the pins. Then she put on
her hat and twitched it to first one side
and then the other; put one hand up be-
hind and showed it forward, and then caught
hold of it in front and pulled it down.
We'll, if you're ready, let's start" growled
Mr.. Spoopendyke. You've been long
enough for telegraph wire now. Come
on
ooh! I haven't got my dress on yet,
pleaded Mrs. Spoopendyke. "Ill be through
in minute"
"Dod CAST the dress!" calculated Mr..
Spoopendyke, where's my paper? Give me
my paper and I'll read for month or two.
You won't be ready till spring. Where's
that paper?" rs
"Take book, dear, recommended Mrs
Spoopendyke, blushing deeply and glancing
around nervously.
81 don't want any measly book" retorted
Mr.. Spoopendyke.
81 think you'll find the paper behind
behind the bookcase" said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, as red as brick, and she hustled in
to her skirt, and began clawing at it behind,
in an effort to loop it up straight. "I'm al
most ready, she giggled Historically, as she
orlsly. I'll be ready before you could
turn the paper inside out, and she snatch
ed ribbon from the drawer, tied it in a
bow, and pinned it at her throat.
Il want to know whether you're going to
find that dodgasted paper for me?" thunder
ed Mr.. Spoopendyke. eff you'll hand me
my cloak, we'll start right away. It's in the
closet there" And Mrs. Spoopendyke
Topped down on the floor and began putting
on her shoes.
"S'pose I'm going to hunt around fol-
measly cloak" howled Mr.. Spoopendyke.
Cant you get your things for yourself? I
want my paper, and want it now.
Il can tell you what was in it," said Mrs.
Spoopendyke. Il can tell you all about ii
while Dress" And she looked up at him
piteously with her face all flushed.
NO doubt, retorted Mr.. Spoopendyke.
"You know all about it. All you want is a
can of oil and ten men swearing all day at
you to be printing press. When are you
going"
Now I'm ready DEAR" smiled Mrs.
Spoopendyke, who wasn't anything of the
sort. "You won't need to read now for we
are going"
They started off together, arm in arm,
Mr.. Spoopendyke growing and his wife
hitching at her various garments as they
went along.
Another time we're going out to dinner
you be ready the day before, You hear?'
demanded Mr.. Spoopendyke.
Yes, dear, responded his wife, and then
she thought to herself, I'm very glad
didn't insist on looking for that paper"