Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-06-02
MUGGINs' SURPRISE PARTY.

One day last week Mrs. NJ. suggest
ed that get my dinner at restaurant,
and not hurry about coming home till
nine clock.
''Why SOP ! asked.
"Becauso, Saws she. "we shall be
extraordinarily busy to-day, and there
won't be any dinner for you il YOU
come home
a. But It's my birthday" ! suggested,
"and don't ike eating my dinner at
q restaurant on my birthday
We'll, never mind this time you II
have another in year, II you live, and
il you don't 1t won't make any differ
ence y
80 wont itp' said l.
"Not the Slightest said she.
+" So am 70 dine at restaurant to-
night?''
Yes" said she, land be sure you
don't forget ii. Don't you come home
before nine o clockr'
"All rightr' said !, and of started.
Thinks /, this Is very queer. wonder
what il all means. There must be
something up. She never asked me 10
get my dinner at restaurant before.
My birthday, too. Fifty years old.
Half hundred. Awful old, Ought
10 celebrate my semi-centennial in
stead of getting cold snack at a
restaurant. This is rough, Perhaps
there Is a rival in the case. Ahl ha!
I've half mind to go back at once
and sec. Pshaw! Impossible at our
time of lifel Wen. I'll have good
dinner anyway, If | do have to eat it
alone. Cod snacksp No, indeed.
Not this evening, at any rate, as we
say in the classics.
With these somewhat somber
thoughts floating about in the gossamcr
fabric OF my imagination, ! wended my
way TO the Office, and soon the business
cares of the day SO occupied my mind
ms 10 eXpel everything else; and when,
at the close of the day, | locked my
desk, and started ont, entirely forgot
about dinner at the restaurant. and
went home as usual. Absent-minded-
ness seems to run in the family.
| did not remember that | was Ia
have dlned at a restaurant till reached
home; and then, rs 1t was too late Ia
return, concluded TO let myself quiet
ly IN with the latch key, and await de.
velopments. AS good luck would have
IT, there was no one in the way, aud
crept quietly up 10 the "eyrien al the
top Of the house, aud threw myself
down on AN old lounge there, and fell
asleep.
How long slept, | didn't know, but
II was pitch dark when ] awoke. Il
must have been near midnight / think.
There was feather pillow on the
lounge, that had seen its best days,
and the many rips and tears in it per-
mitted free egress TO the feathers. My
hair was full OF them. A good sprink
hing of them also around my clothes,
groped my way out into the hall and
looked down over the banisters.
The house seemed all ab aye with
light AT first ! thought there was a
hre; then wondered whore | was. aud
how ! got there. Then began To feel
hungry, and started down stairs The
noise below seemed to me like the
sound of revelry by night" and as
got further down stairs ! began to take
IN the situation.
Before knew whore | was, found
myself right among a crowd OF excited
ana delighted friends, all shaking my
hands and congratulating me on living
10 10 attain 10 such healthy old age,
Ahen they began TO laugh, as they
caught glimpse OF the feathers; and
then Mrs. NJ hove in sight.
Why Ephraimn' said she, "where
ON lrth have you beenp'
Weh,' said /, yawning and trying