Brenham weekly banner. [volume] (Brenham, Tex.) 1877-1907, 1881-06-16
Warming up . Hornet,s Nest.


AdlHElluC SllSCi WIZ dStlSlilS
lto find a case that all the doc
tors have failed to cure; and
then go1to ,Ntpr4 with herbs and
roots and strange things and
try to effect at least an i'm
provement. a. few days ago
she got hold ola girl with a
staff neck, and she offered an
old negro named uncle Tom
Kelly, fifty cents to go to the
woods and bring her hornets
nest. The old man spent sew
eral days along the Holden
road, and yesterday morning he
secured his prize and brought
it home in d basket. When he
reached the Central market he
had a few purchases to make,
and after getting some tea at
a grocery he placed his basket
on a barrel and went out to
look for a beef bone.
lit was a dull day for trade.
Thegrocer sat by the stove rub
cling his bald head. His clerk
stood at the desk balancing ac-
counts, and three or four men
lounged around talking politics.
1t was a serene hour. One hum
dred aud fifty hornets had gone
to roost in that nest for the win
ter. The genial atmosphere had
begun to timber them up. One
old veteran opened his eyes,
rubbed his leg and said it was
the shortest winter he had ever
known in all his hornet days.
"A second shook of the lethargy
and seconded the motion aud
in FIVE minutes the whole nest
was alive and Its owners were
ready to sail out and investi-
gate. You don't have to hit a
hornet with the broad side OF
an axe to make him mad. He's
mad all over all the time, and
he does not care a picyune
whether he tackles a humming-
bird or an elephant.
The,grocer was telling one of
the men that he. and general
Grantwere boys together, when
he gave sudden start Of sur
prise. This was followed by
several other starts; then he
jumped over a barrel ofsugar
and yelled like a Pawnee. Some
smiled, thinking he was after a
funny climax, but it was only a
minute before a solemn old far
mer jumped three feet high and
came down to roll over a job
lot of wash boards. Then the
clerk ducked his head and made
a rush for the door. He didn't
get there. One of the other
men who had been looking up
and down to see what could be
the matter, felt suddenly called
upon to go home. He was 60
ing at rate of forty miles an
hour when he collided with the
clerk and they rolled on the
floor. There was no use to
tell the people in that store to
move on. They could not tarry
to save 'em. They all felt that
they must vacate the premises.
a yell over by the cheese box
was answered by a war-hoop
from the show case. A howl
from the kerosene barrel near
the back door was answered by
wild GESTURES by the show win
dow.
The crowd went out together.
Uncle Tom was just coming in
with his beef bone. When a
large body meets a small one
the large body knocks it into
the middle of next week. The
old man laid around in the
slush until everybody had
stepped on him all they wanted
Ito, and then he sat up and ask
ed:
"Hev dey got all de FIRE put
out yita"
Some of tee hornets sailed
out doors to fall by the way
side, and others waited on top
ofbarfels, baskets and Jars to
be slaughtered. It was half an
hour before the last one was
disposed Of, and then uncle
Tom walked il, picked up the
nest and said:
-~Mebbe dis will cure de stiff
hess in dat gals neck, just de
same, but I tole yerI got bank
ed and bumped, an sot down
on till it III take hui medical
college all winter long ter git
me so I kin jump offa street
kyar!'