Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-02-06

AIN Ohio man has brought a suit
against his own mother for SANDER, al
leging damages at $4,000.
IT is estimated that the money paid
for Texas cattle during the past five
years amounts to $3.50, 100000.
SHE was plump and beautiful, and he
was wildly fond Of her. She hated him,
but, womanlike, she strove to catch him.
He was a flea.
The Boston Globe says that promis-
ing young horse In South Boston has
been named DR.. Tanner, in hopes that
he will become fast.
Down by the river side they met,
Sweet Romeo and Juliet;
Her hand in mis- he placed, and said
''Sweet Juliet, 1 would thee we'd"
"Indeed?n she queried; "Ah ! let's go:
Get in this boat. Oh row me, oh2"
"I HAVE great ear, wonderful ear,
said conceited musician, in the course
of conversation. $50 has a donkey"
replied bystander.
"I RISE for information, said MEM
Der of Legislative body sI am very
glad to hear it" said bystander; emo
man needs it more"
q
And lack Of pluck is the only barrier,
We would make this miM suggestion:
Shoot yourself or pop the question.
-Keokal; Constitutions.
A LITTLE boy came to his mother re-
Gently and said: Mamma, should
think that, if I was made Of dust, L
would get muddy inside when I drink.
A PHILADELPHIA husband, who
doesn't want his wife to tamper with his
letters, is the author of the report that
Internal machines are being found In
mails.
A HEALTHY man requires about pint
of air at breath he breathes about
LOCO times an hour, and requires about
ffty-seven hogsheads of air In twenty
four hours.
A KISS without mustache is like an
egg without salt.-Spa,a5Sb Prover6.
Always remember that, girls and never
kiss without the mtlstache; always kiss
within it.
Mrs. CooDLE was telling Jane that
the potatoes had an oniony smell, when
that monster, Coodle, suggested that
perhaps they had been cooked in
saucepan with leak init.
"WHAr is woman's will ~ shrieks
social scientist of the bachelor persua-
sion. Experience In orr younger days
teaches us that it is the only will thai
the heirs don't want to contest.
ONLY 20 years?" eyes," she e1-
planned. "George made me promise
when we were married that I would
never change. [ was 90 then, and 1
mean to keep my promise
A LADY who had quarreled with her
bald-headed lover said, in dismissing
him. ssWhat is delightful about you,
my friend, is that [ have not the trouble
of sending you back any locks of hair. "
A YOUNG lady, having read about a
man having invented stove which will
consume its own smoke, hopes he will
next devise method whereby tobacco
smokers can be run on the same economi-
cal principles.
BROWN gave his wife. an elegant UNI
brella for her birthday present. 'Be
very careful of it r. he said to her. ooh,
be easy, dear I will use it only on Sun
days and holidays, and then only when
the weather is fine."
A PRUDENT man advised his drunken
servant to put by his money for rainy
day. In few weeks his master inquired
how much he had saved. "Fatih none
at ALL" said he; it rained yesterday
and it all went"
A WOMAN hunted two hours for q
| needle she dropped on the floor, and
couldn't find it, and then her husband
came in, and had hardly taken his boots
off before he could tell where it was.
Queer how men can do things that
women can't.
ELLA H1Ge1Ns, the young daughter Of
a poor miner, at Dunmore, Pa, desired
to dress as we'll as her companions at .
forthcoming party, and therefore pur-
chased some fneries at store, saying
they were for the wife of a neighbor, who
would pay for them. The merchant, on
ascertaining how he had been tricked,
made arrangements to have the girl ar
rested. When the officer went to get
her, she was found hanging to beam in
the garnet Of her home.
A MYSTERIOUS star, called the Pilgrim,
which was observed in 945, 1854 and
1872, is expected by astronomers to ap-
pear before long. It was described in
1872 as brighter than Jupiter, and
"such was its brilliancy that persons
were able to detect it at noon in clear
sky, and at night when the sky was so
overcast as to hide all other stars" If
it appears it will probably be visible
for several weeks in the constellation of
Cassiopeia.
MIGUEL Soils is a half-breed farmer,
living in the foot hills of the Sierra
Mesilla, and the Oldest man IN the world.
His age is mythical. Gray haired men
told DR.. LUZ Hernandez that they re-
membered Miguel as centenarlan when
they were boys. The doctor found the
old fellow at work in his orchard, parch-
ment skinned, robust, active, his now
white hair twisted turban-fashion
around his head, and his eyes SO bright
| that the doctor felt uncomfortable when
thew were turned upon him. Cues
toned as to his habits, Miguel told the
doctor that the secret of living cent
GU,