The Portland daily press., 1881-12-05

| $1,000 out all over him, as II ne mad tumDled
| into the river, aided by an occasional glass OF
| steaming ice-water brought him by an attend
1 ant. AT the end of the half-hOur the guide
| reached behind him and twice touched the
button of an electric bell-an appliance that
| Pat of course knew nothing about At this
signal the guide arose and gravely beckoned
/ the candidate to follow him. Into the mys-
/ terious inner recesses OF the bath they went
| till they reached the very hottest OF the hot
rooms, where the temperature was little over
| 200o.
| This was too much. Pat considered himself
| already well cooked, and he instantly rebelled
l against going into any hotter place.
"Ill have no more of it," said he. "If have
to either roast starve, I'd rather starve; but
into that room l will not go. No, not if starve
| this minute!"
Two of the attendants, who by this time
| knew what was going on, tried to urge him in,
| but Pat was determined. Suddenly be broke
| away from them and made dash for the door.
| An instant more and he would have been in
| the street, in costume not now in vogue
across the East river. But other attendants
caught him, and half coaxed, half dragged him
| back into the very hot room. There he in
cautiously left the strips OF carpet and walked
| over the bare hot tiles that kept him changing
feet like chicken standing on ice. he and
his guide were the only occupants OF this over
heated apartment, and Pat began to beg to be
| let off, promising anything In the world il
| he would only be allowed breath OF fresh
| air.
Mr.. Clark, fearing that too much of the heat
might hurt him, told him that he had success
| fully passed the scruting Of the Grand Council,
and had delighted the invisible Sanhedrim by
his bravery and fo-titude. There now remain
ed he said, only few formalities, and when
they were over Fat would be.a fnll-hedged Red
Man and ready to go to work. The candidate
was accordingly taken to the scruoOlns depart
ment, and in less than 10 minutes he was,
beyond doubt the cleanest emigrant ever
landed in America. Before the attendants
were done rubbing him he was Red Man,
indeed, for all the blood OF bis body seemed 70
be tngling against his skin. Then the big cold
water hose was turned on, and poor Pat was
almost drowned.
sNow, then, Sam" said the attendant,
when the rubbing was completed, ARE the
irons ready?"
This immediately set Pat to nquiring about
the irons, and what was to be done with
them.
They're arelnot quite hot enough" Sam
replied, ''but they'll be ready in minute or
two."
Then Pat was told that every Red Man had
to have his initials branded on his back for
purposes of Identification, and was asked what
his initials were. He began at this to beg SO
hard to be let off that his friend came to the
rescue, and said the branding could just as well
be put off to some other day.
'Now If you can swim, said Mr. CLARK, you
are pretty nearly though. Every Red Man has
to know how to swim; you can get into tnls
TANK ana SNOW WldJ yOu 'Idu w.
Pat protested that he had been good swim
mer for years; but nothing would do but he
must plunge into the big tank, where the
water, although slightly warmed, felt like ice
water to man just out OF the hot rooms. he
soon showed his ability to swim, and, after be-
ing we'll dried, was taken into small apart
ment adjoining where the electric shampoo
ing is done. Without any suspicion, Pat stood
himself upon the large glass plate that formed
part of the floor, and the operator began to put
his hat in Faa1inpqS. ThAelaCtTlC SlAmDOO
is administered with sponge brush, and
whenever the brush touches the body 1t COM
municates the current and gives shock. But
Pat had no suspicion OF the wicked little ma
chine that stood by his side.
"Ot course you can read and write?" he was
asked.
PAT said he could, and was handed pencil
and q stiff card on which he was to wrl'e his
name and his former address, He began to
write slowly and awkwardly, and had just nicely
finished capital 2 when the operator touched
the electric brush to his elbow, and the pencil
made quick dash across the card. while Pat
squirmed and looked anxiously about to see
what had bit him. After several more unsuc-
cessful trials to write his name, and after being
accused of ignorance, he threw away the PEN
Gil, blaming the innocent piece OF wood for his
troubles. He was on the point OF leaving the
room in despair when the operator applied the
brush to the small of his back and turned on
full current of electricity. Pat could not,
of course raise his feet from the glass plates;
he was powerless to help himself, and could
do nothing but enjoy the sensation OF q
handful of hot pokers running down his
back.
This only lasted few seconds, and then Mr..
Clark slapped him affectionately on the back
and warmly grasDed his hand.
"It's all over" said he, land you are one OF
us. You have stood it like hero, as knew
you would as soon as l saw your face Now
we will go and dress; and while We are
dressing win give you the signs and pass
words"
"Wheneyer YOU meet a man" Mr.. Clark
continued in the dressing-rooms," and want TO
know whether he is a Red Man, you say Ne
buchadnezzar' to him and wink twice with
your right eye. If he is one of us he will wink
with his left eye, and will treat you like
brother. This is all can tell you Just now,
for you have only taken the first degree. When
YOU take the second and third degrees can
tell you much more-how to save yourself from
drowning, for instance and from the attack oil
q mad dog"
"Now we will 90 and see some OF the broth
ers" said Mr.. Clark as they left the bathing
house, land see whether we can't find some
thing for you to do" He had had in his MUD
all the time friend of his who was in need Of
a young man, and to his place of business they
went. 1t was just little OF a joke on Clark
when Pat, as soon as they entered the place
and met the gentleman they sought, said Me-
buchadnezzar" to him, and twice winked Vio-
lently with his right eye, till the gentleman
thought he was crazy But Mr.. Clark took his
friend aside and explained matters to him, and
they retired to the private office apparently to
discuss Pats qualifications for the situation,
bnt really to let off some of the laughter that
was splitting their sides.
Wfthin a very few minutes Pat was installed
in good situation at very respectable salary,
which much more than repaid him for all his
troubles. AS Mr.. Clark was leaving the
store, Pat, profuse with thanks, called him
back.
"Oid you say" he asked, ''there were two
more degrees in the Red Men?'
.Yes," Mr. Clark replied, "two more, each
better than the other"
"Well," said Pat, 81 guess I'll not take tho
other two. It's not for the loikes Of me to
have too much honor al wonst.