Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1881-04-30
CHOICE CHIT CHAT
On Moral and Miscellaneous
Matters.

CHOICE CHIT CHAT
On Moral and Miscellaneous
culled for Saturdays Register.
It's quite wonderful how many things
there are in this world which you do
not want il you can only make yourself
think so.
It is q curious fact that the things We
don't have always seem to be the most
desirable. The figs on the other side OF
the hedge. say the Spanish, are far sweet
err than any on this side.
1t is a pretty serious thing to break
an old friendship, for, like old china, II
can never be made quite whole again.
A broken friendship may be soldered,
but il will always show the crack.
You would save yourself and others a
great many useless heartburnings il you
would manage to keep your eyes open
to the virtues Of your friends and look
at their faults with your eyes shut.
The American is always willing to
risk all he has in the hope Of doubling
it. Heis poor to day and rich to-mor-
Tow, and, per contra, rich to-day and
poor tomorrow. The more cautious
Portuguese make themselves contented
With what would be considered poverty
here and say, "Give me the ass that car
ries me rather than the horse that
throws me-"
1t is very well, according to the relig-
ious creed OF some people, to trust in
Providence; but equally necessary to
keep q sharp lookout for yourself.
peter" said good old man, after q
hard days ride through pelting storm,
81 really believe that had it not been
for a kind Providence and that thick
waterproof coat should have caught
my death OF cold"
There is nothing quite so absurd as q
hobby-horse, and yet every man has
larger or smaller one in the family sta
bic. One never attempts to ride it but
he makes himself ridiculous. An illit.
crate preacher who, among other false
hoods, believed that men are always
right and women always wrong, was
wont to declare that the five foolish viz
gins who had no oil in their lamps were
all women, while the five wise virgins
were all men.
The sons OF the Emperor OF Austria
once got into a fierce quarrel. In the
height Of passion one said to the other,
"Iou are the greatest ass in Vienna"
At that moment the Emperor appeared
in the doorway, aud, highly offended to
find his children quarreling, said, You
forget, young gentlemen, that am pres
ent." They all then saw the point that
had been unconsciously made, and the
quarrel ended in hearty laugh.
After all, there is nothing quite so re-
freshing as ones native air, though fam
lilies sometimes get so mixed that 1t is
difficult to tell, as the following anec'
dote sufficiently proves, which is ones
native air. A poor German from Wit
temberg, which is the Ireland OF the
Continent, when describing his child,
rem, said: "They are all perfectly well
except that little boy who was born IN
America. think shall have to take
him back to Germany, for l really be-
lieye he is languishing for his native air,
which the poor fellow has never smeit
at all"
There Is no part OF literature which
gives more pleasure than that in which
the speaker unconsciously involves him
self in terrible criticism in the attempt
to verbally crush his opponent. Wit is
a very dangerous weapon, and must be
used by skilful tongues and brains or
it will return, like the malicious BOOM
erang, to smite the man who hurls it.
Two Irish barristers had quarrel in the
court room, and gradually descended
from sarcasm to billingsgate. In mo-
ment OF great evaporation one oil them
said, "Sir, propose TO make you De-
have ike q gentleman" and the other
replied, perhaps with more truth than
he was aware, "Sir, / defy you to do It;
neither you nor any one else could do
i.~
Biographical notices are not very
difficult TO write, because it is not at all
necessary to tell the truth in them. 1t
seems to be the one occasion on which
a man is permitted to give free wing to
his Imagination, and on which it would
be lad taste to come anywhere near an
exact description Of the qualities OF the
departed. Still, there is limit beyond
which il is unnecessary togo. A writer
for an Irish paper, for instance, ended
brief and eloquent notice OF Robespierre
by saving: extraordinary man
has gone TO the only place where such
rare virtues as he possessed can be APP
preciated. He left no children to mourn
his loss except younger brother VINO
was killed at the same time.
There are few things which better be-
come a man than the habit OF constant
courtesy. 1t costs little to be kind or to
say kind things, but they go a great
way in the make up OF human happi.
ness. We sometimes think it is better
to say a generous word OF praise and
not mean it than To utter harsh criti-
cism and be honest about 1t. Courtesy
Iubricates the wheels and makes every
thing go smoothly. while too plain
speaking, though it is "only intended
for your good" Is apt to raise the
spirit of resistance and rebellion
To tell 4 man OF bad temper
that his temper is the worst you ever
y. .,-, HE fam mar or oil