The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1881-05-19
Swallowing Cherry Pits,


There little boy who frightened his
grandmother by saying: There, grandma, I've
eaten all the cherries you gave me, and now if you
the pits" And the old lady in great trepidation i'm
medately gave him the siIpence- The veraeious his
torian does not inform whether the cherry-eater
was assisted in intimidating his grandmother by
gang of yOciferous urchns who stood around howl
ing, .Give him the sixpence or he'll kill himself with
the cherry pits" and afterward divided with him the
proceeds Of the enterprise; but undoubtedly he
That kind of boy is very apt to have crones who
eager to forward his schemes and divide the profits.
For the benefit, however Of the senior Senator from
New York who is Just now threatening to make way
with himself if he cannot have all he wants, and of
the noble hand of devoted adherents who wildly
beating the air and calling upon the Administration
to let him have his own way lest he swallow the
cherry pits and fly away to be angel on the wings
of perityphlitis-we beg to remark that this was
an exceptionally indulgent and tiInd grandmother.
and that there is record of the same boys playing
the cherry pits on her the second time. No boy
do that sort Of thing hab.ually unless his grand
always ndulgent and sometimes tinid but not yet in
its dotage.
BY grace of the Republican party, Senator Conk.
ling has for twenty years held very high and impOr
tant public positions and large part of the time has
welded enormous power. For eight years he had
absolute control of a larger amount Of patronage
than any other half dozen Senator's while his IN
fiuenee at the White House such that its
pant deferred to his lightcst wish ordering the for
prejudices and adapting his socisl relations his
whims. Threatened with diminution of this ALSO
lutc power in 1876 he for long time held himself in
suspense between the two parties, while his oppO-
nents openly gloried in his impending aposacy. But
he swallowed no cherry pits though he got no six
pence, and his indulgent grand gave him
more cherries in the shape of a reelection in 1873.
Toward Administration which rescued the Re
publican party from tho pit of disaster into which
his iaEortes and his policy had plunged It, and
tude Of the party than he in twenty, he maintained
an attitude of contemptuous hostility and the char
acter Of its most bitter personal and political foe
tn
torship by putting upon the party the candidate of
his and not their choice he fell aain into sulienness
and for time refused to be coneiliated by the
selection of his nearest friend for second place. There
talk of cherry pits, but he presently aban
doned the idea OF siede and concluded to help save
the party upon which his own political life depends.
And now we have him again, of old, demanding
the whole and threatening mischief to the party he
is not humored. Unless he is allowed to have his
own way in everything he will make q split in the
party. And then what .'Why, then,- cry all the
little fellows who are his district messenger boys
1--WE shall lose New York, ard lose the Presidency in
1884, Oh We shall ehi lie comes up for reelection
in 1884. DO understand that because he can't
have everything now. he is going to spite his grand
mother by swallowing cherry pits and fading away
with political colic in 1884 Hadn't he better think
twice about it-as heretofore A diseonsoate grand
mother NAV survive her grief, but the hey that
climbs the golden stair with stomach full Of cherry
pits never comes back. We are told that Mr.. Conk
ling is a very great man, and that the Republican
party cannot afford to offend him. He is u very
great man. it is true. He has n deliberate manner
and most afiluent vocabulary. No man can poise
longer dissyllable to select from the whole
tongue the polysyllable most potent to convey his
lofty and inefiabie disdaiu; did any
have such power hoist his adversary upon the two
monosyllables that man" and fling him with sniff
into the abys small depths of his absolute contempt
Cicero with his ..iste homo nowhere in the
comparison. Yes, he is great Everybody admits
il. But the present question: npprehend IT, is
not much whether the Republican party can af
ford to stand by and let him fool with his interior
il is whether the whole he is for his part sin
cerely ambitious TO bring himself down with the
colic.-Nesc York Tribune.