Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-05-08
P1TH AND POINT.
WHEAT made the bridal trip?
SCooPED in-All grades of sugar.

WHEAT made the bridal trip?
SoooPHD in-All grades Of sugar.
HARD to realize Borrowed money.
"a WATCHED pot never boils"- over.
TIE drum major is the display head"
Of q brass band.
WHISKY is the iveliest "still'- born
child on record. ~fsy
FoR thirty years the silver Scent
pieces have bred emotional profanity.
TIE poor yeD have with you al
ways" but the rich go away In summer
time.
A KENTUCKY company insures whisky,
but declines to take fire risks on the
consumers.
WEATHER prophecy When you see
two cats on the woodshed looking each
other in the eye and waving their tails,
it is sign of squall. 2las Ea-@tf
ct PUT outside my window large
box filed with mold, and sowed it
with seed. What do you think came
.up?" Wheat, barley, OF oats? %
:" No-a policeman, who ordered me to
remove it. eey
=
CHOW, George, you must. divide the
cake honorably with your brother
Charles" 6 What is honorable, moth
err" cit means that you must give
him the largest piece" "Then,
mother. I'd rather Charley would di-
vide it,"
CONVERSATION between two French
girls: The older-"I think mamma
ought to be ashamed of treading al
ways on our heels and watching us SO
carefully" The younger The fact
is, she'd just make us want to be wick
ed-n we. weren't thinking of it all the
time"
A GIRL heard her father criticised Sc
yerely across dinner table. The care
less critic paused moment to say:
81 hope he is no relative of yours,
miss 2" Quick as thought she replied
with the utmost nonchalance "Only
d connection of my mothers by mar
rage"
TEACHER Now, Robby, what is the
plural of mouse ?" Robby-ss Do. nom
M" Teacher hy, Robby, I'm sur
prised. The plural Of mouse is mice.
OOu lOIStt tudt HOW. IsoDDy-
"No'm." Teacher" SHOW tell me what
is the plural of house." Robby-
"Hice."
WRECKED IN PORT.
"Ah ha |" said Jones, ga billet doux!
I.know from some sweet maiden, fair;
Methinks it bears perfume now,
Straight from the breath of kisses rare.
L know it's rash
It's sacrilege to break the seal
Of this white envelope that wraps
And yet, to see who tits so leal,
fain will open it-perhaps
I've made mash ~
1t read: "Dear Sir-You owe this bar
An x, and must have my pay; 80
You've hung me up too long, by far;
And III not wait another day
t.4-t ~ I'm talking cash ~
i-Petro,cum World.
"DEAcoN," said the widow, as she
stroked in q feline manner the maltese
tabby that evidently lay in her lap for
that purpose, "don't youlong for spring,
with its balmy breath, its warm sun
shine and its gentle showers, which
awaken nature and put life into every
thing that has laid cold and dead during
the long winter, and bring everything
up out Of the cold, cold ground into light
and life?" "Wen, hardly, widow" re-
sponded the deacon; "you know buried
my second wife last fall"
TIE following reached the New Or
leans Picay1ne with the request that it
should be published as an advertise
ment: 81 want ahouse ceaper one that
knowes how to ceap ahouse in its proper
manor one that will help makal aiving
and that is well respected in good so.
ciety with good education but not thro-
graduate with some property SO that it
will amount to one Thousen dollars or
more medium sise girl but not to ex-
ceade Twentythree years off age, as that
is my age I am amedium slice man with
darck hair small gray eyes small eyers
and round face worth about Twothousen
dollars with no bad habits Young girls if
you want to marry and think you will
fill the place write to. me for mean
what say. Direct to" etc. .ar.
A COLORADO physician sends the fol-
lowing: some bitter cold night, early
in the winter, had a call to visit pa
tent about thirty FIVE miles distant, the
trail lying over an uninhabited plain,
vast tracts Of which were inclosed in
fences of three wires, fastened to cedar
posts. We entered one Of these ranches,
as they are called here, through a gap
left for the purpose, and after short
time the trail was entirely obliterated
by the snow. No shelter was near, and
we wandered about for some time, when
I remarked to my driver, an old timer
that the advantage OF being inside o
rancho of 5000 or G, 900 acres, inclosed
by wire fence, was not very apparent,
as we had lost our way all the same.
Tribulati0ns Of Amateur Poets.
Rodney Mcclellan has been compelled
to pay verdict of $500 in breach-of-
promise case at Barrie, Canada, the evil
dence Of his promise being the following
verse which he wrote to the plaintiff:
Long have loved, but some strange spell
r Forbade my heart its tale to tell er
Here, take this card, and simply feel
The love my lips dare not reveal
Henry Horace Dade, of San Francisco,
spnt an enemy q r,osfal card on which 1vaa