The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-11-25
Interview With a Small Boy.

A small boy leaned out OF the rear
third-story window of his fathers house
in Brook YIN yesterday afternoon, look.
ing at the sky, and at times breaking
out with the tune, lin the North Sea
Lived a Whale" His noise attracted
his newspaper neighbor, who also
leaned out and said, "Well, George,
how are YOUR
Use a prisoner locked up on bread
and water" George replied, "just
cause I didn't know it was loaded.
You see, father was in the army, and
last week when you heard him firm of
his pistols he was shoOtin' at cat.
He shot five times, and the cat looked
up and smiled when he got frou'. Says
l, Father, did you ever kill q man
when you was a soldier?' thinking.
you know. that he couldn't shoot fur a
cent. He says, Il s'pose sO.' 'Well,' l
says, you muster bin close enough to
hit him with an ak, and he sent me into
the house. Well, seed where he hid
his pistol in his overcoat and Yesterday
l got it out, an there was an accident.
felt sure it wasn't loaded, for didn't 1
hear father fire it off? l put it under my
piller, m 1 waited for supper to be
over, cause wanted to scare the girls.
Girls always boiler when they see a
pistol. Well, our minister come to tea.
Ministers are the greatest hands to
come to tea; it's half their work to 60
round an eat suppers with the ladies.
Father went down to the Convention
and Bess and Lily, them's the girls,
went into the parlor to see the minister
didn't get-sleepy. 'Bess,' says l, lend
me your blanket shawl for few min
utes, want to be an Indian brave I
wrapped the shawl round me, put
fathers cane over my shoulder for a
gun, m then got the pistol, m
crept softly down to the parlor
so they wouldn't know Indians
was skirmishin' round their camp. I
pushed open the door, n there was the
minister and Bess sittin' at opposite
ends of the sofy. n Lii was crocheting
a lamp mat. All was still. N says:
The hour has come Then I give
three whar whoops m rushed in and
said, Surrender or shootn There
was a panic. The girls went into nys-
terics, m the preacher said, MY son.
mebbe that pistols loaded
"Says 1. s'S'render, pale chief, or
I'll shoot yer dead in yer tracks They
all made q rush at me to take the pistol
away, m I fired. Lordy, what a noise.
was skeered most to death. The bull
let went into picture of the signers of
the Defamation of Independence. and
took off the head of one of the signers.
The preacher turned pale m said l was
wicked boy. Iknowd it n | knowd
what was goin' to ketch. The girls
cried like as though there was fun raj
N 1 was whipped. l dreamed all night
I was fightin' the Indians. m when l
woke up this mornin' 1 felt sure my
name would be in the papers. They
gave me bread m water for breakfast
m wouldn't let me see newspaper.
So thought I'd escape. tore up the
two sheets, tied one end to the bureau
drawer, and was climbin' down like
folks do at fire, when somethin' give
way. I fell about a thousand feet l
thought, came down so hard. hit
the stone area, m it seemed to me as if
it was night and l was loOkin' at about
mllllO0 STARS. 1 Uluu = AuOW uOCuiA
for a minute. Then l come to-"
"What broker"
"Nothin' broke; the bureau drawer
come out. I Laughter tied on to the gas
fixture. Father wouldn't give me a
newspaper but he gave me another
lickin' and some more bread and water.
l s'pose now I'll be month on bread
n water"
But you mustn't make so much
noise"
THAT was op'ra was singin'. Don't
you like op'ra? Well, you don't care if
I play the umpah?''
:" What is the umpah?'
"Why, didn't you never hear a brass
band going down the street? One mar
with little horn goes Ta-te-rent-ta
ta-ta-ta,' and man with a big horr
goes 'um.pah. um.pah, um-pah.' That's
the umpah play"
As the neighbor drew in his head the
small boy began on the "umpah," and
he was playing it when the reporter
went away.-N. y San.
The Reindeer.