davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03
wolsey conkiiug to Cromwell Lapham


Considering that Lapham was wont
to be faithful dependent of Conklings,
the fallen ex-senator might be excused
if he were to quote to his successor.
with slight notifications, the. verses
which Wolsey addressed to Cromwell.
Let's dry our eyes; and thus far hear me,
And-when am forgotten. as shall be;
And sleep in dull cold marble, where no men
ton
OF me more must be heard-say, taught
Say, Conkiing-that once trod the ways of
Aud Sounded all the depths and shoals of
Found thee way, out of his wreck, to rise in
A sure and safe one, though my master miss
it,
Mark but my fall and that that ruin'd me.
Love myself last; cherish those hearts that
Corruption wins not more than honesty.
Still in thy right hand carry gentle peace.
To silence envious tongues; be lust and fear
Let all the ends thou a'mst at be thy coun
try's,
Thy God and truths; then, If thou fall'st, @
Thou fall st q blessed martyr.
o Lapham, Lapham,
Had but served my land with half the zeal
served my cheftan, Grant, l would not in
Have beon left naked to mine enemies.
-DttrUH Free Press.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03

In a drenching rain the other day
Alice Relyea, alittle girl ofeleven years,
was found lying on rock about half q
mile from her home in Sleightsburg, a
suburb of Kingston. N. Y, by some
boys who CHANGED to stroll in the vicin-
ity. Thinking her o tramp they amused
themselves by throwing sticks and
stones at her, but they soon found that
the child was insensible, wet, cold and
blue. On discovering who she was they
carried her to her home, where she re-
vived and was able to tell her story. 1t
seems that her mother had been very
harsh with her and had spitefully yelled
to her, :" Get out of this kitchen. you
dirty little wretch; why don't you 60
somewhere else to lay aroundp" and
Alice wandered away soon afterwards
to the place of her discovery. In re-
Spouse to her mothers questions on her
return, she answered: "Why, 1 thought
you nor papa didn't care for me any
more, and went into the woods where
l could hear the birds sing and see the
sweet flowers and sanlight."
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03

where candidates arc named ana mace TOR
every oihcer ecsed by the people. In TIE
same malignant soilir, where he we ana
are Democratic CITY and loo Il GIVE nments,
the wishes of the pc pie were defeated by the
comb ned forces of part sar legislators. I'm
DO, tant cases aw iting the decision OF state
Courts were set as dc to await the clamors OF
pai tbs ms ut home and n the Legis aturc, and
this under ruling upon points OF OF der ana
rules OF parliamentary right of practice wholly
unprecedented In the b story OF the statc or
country. The chief source of the p cscnt dan
ger is the Federal patronage and the impure
administrati ion of the body of Federal offc rs,
whose numbers are now in excess OF lO.UJ)
persons and every year inc easing in num-
be-. Against this enormous agrees We and
personal power the Q must be eternal vigil
lance for the right OF free education OF the
that knowledge. and integrity. and patr. otism
throughout the State and country, which
one can maintain a union among the states
and secure peace and prosperity all over the
land
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03
SCHOOL AND CHURCH.


There are 166, 900 missionary Bap-
lists in Alabama
in England the proportion OF unit
versity students to the population y one
to $500. In the German Empire IL 10
one to 1000
Rev. John +. Adams, of the New
HAMPSHIRE Conference, who IS now
niuety-one wears old. is said to De Inc
Oldest preacher of the Methodist Churcn
in this country or in the world.
Over 81, 500, 900 has been raised al
ready for the Wesleyan Metnou's'
Thanksgiving fund, and public coliec,
tions are being made at the PrinciPM
chapels throughout the circuit In 'rca'
Britain.
A Norwegian Lutheran Synod m
Iowa recently decided that it was not
proper for one of its ministers to accept
a nomination to the Legislature. Inc
synod unanimously decided in favor OF
mo politics"
The famous old English schools
Eaton, Harrow, Rugby and Winchester
are constantly full to Overlooking, al
though their cost constantly increases.
Oxford and Cambridge were never 50
crowded with students as now.
The work of education in Armenia
will hereafter be promoted by special
society. This society has just been
formed in London. and has numerous
and distinguished committee. The first
meeting was held a few days ago under
the Presidency of the late Dean OF
Westminster.
Since the Revisers completed their
work on the New Testament a manu-
script of the Gosples Matthew and Mark
has been discovered in Italy, dating as
far back as the fifth century. Its leaves
are of purple parchment, and the writing
is in silver ink. There are many illu-
limitations and pictures. 1t is in every
re spect a remarkable manuscript. No
authoritative statement Is made as to
the light which would have been shed
on the work of the Revisers if this man.
uscript had been discovered a year or
two earlier.
The Society to Encourage Study at
Home now has pupils in thirty-seven
States, three in the province OF Canada.
and one in Bermuda. 1t is conducting
work in English literature, the fine arts,
the sciences, in music, mathematics,
French and German, and it is constantly
widening its sphere. OF the whole num-
Der of pupils seventy-six per cent. have
persevered in their work. The leading
library now includes 1865 volumes.
The teaching grows more specialized
and objective every year. The Society
is full of force and there is no end OF
volunteers for the work. Among the
students is mother of four children.
from two to twelve wears of age, who
takes care of the milk from twenty-five
COWS and lives at the West.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

Lets strip the light fantastic toc."
said the chiropodist to his patient.
Boston Commercial Bulletin.
The Pittsburgh Telegraph has dis
covered q way of making lemonade with
out lemons. Pooh! Out this way they
have neither used lemons nor sugar for
years. Detroit Free Press.
There are Just two classes Of pco
pie in this world. Half of them were
the first to discover the comet and the
other half have been shot through the
Einsira Free Press.
Smith, who went into amateur
farming this year. says he planted his
bean poles two months ago and has wa
tered them regularly, and for all that
they haven't grown an inch. and show
not the faintest sign of blossoming yet.
He begins to fear they will bear no
beans this year.-Bcston Transcript.
AT a convention of dime-novel
writers held in New York the other
day it was unanimously resolved not t.
introduce in their works of fiction here.
after any boy as hero who has not
robbed his father of $1,000, tortured
his little brother. served six months In.
Jail, set fire to neighbours house, com.
mitted highway robbery and run way
from home to exterminate Indians and
rob mail coaches. -Norristosrn Herald.
-Spriggins, who is the catcher of
Jersey nine. and has hands like an elc-.
plants ears, was prancing around the
other day Boosting of his exploits on
the field of carnage, when he enthusi-
astically exclaimed: "Now, do you sup
pose for an instant that q ball could get
past me after l oace got myself into po-
sitionw mo. I guess not" said by
stander, CHANGING, thoughtfully at Sprig-
gins graphing irons, !" unless it went
around through the next countyr The
convention thon adjourned sine de-
VII and Wisdom.
1t now appears, from authentic in
stances cited in the local papers all
over America that nine of the
soldiers wounded in the late war were
shot right straight through the liver;
that about thirty per cent. Of this num-
Der were shot clean through the liver
and back again; that forty EIGHT per
cent. OF the whole number were shot
exactly as the President was, only with
larger bullets; that they all got well ar i
are alive now. 1t seems that it was MT
considered respectable for any man IN
the army to get shot anywhere except
\ in the liver. Or neck. The officers
generally preferred the neck. -Burlis J.
Ton Hawk-Eye.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03

A month ago J. 4 Richardson, vt
this city, received a postal card firm
his brother in Haynesville, Iowa, con-
tanning over 5000 words. It-was writ
ten to him as q letter, and the writing
upon it was SO fine that it required =
magnifying- glass to read portion of
it. MIR. Richardson made up his mind
that he would not be outdone, and four
weeks ago made preparations to reply
in the same style. He wrote during his
leisure moments an answer, which lie
brought to close to-day, the space On
his card having been entirely consumed.
When his task was completed he count
ed the number of words. and found that
he had 6.471, q number exceeding the
one he had received by over 1000. 1t
was written with steel pen and can be
read without the aid of a glass. --Stoct-
ton real. Herald.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03

-Four hundred Hungarian families.
with capital of some $500 each. have
notified the American Vice Consul at
Pesth of their desire TO found homes in
this country.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03

st. Louis bakers are on a strike
and are loaiing around doughing moth
ing and making kneadless trouble for
their employers.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03

1t may interest smokers to know
that New York Judge has just decid-
ed that a man has a right to punch a
smoker in the ribs with the end of his
umbrella if he 'puffs the smoke of a
bad cigar in his face, even if j. is in q
smoking-car The smoker who sued
had to pay costs.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1881-09-03


without developing any resenbl nee
to the father in either case; and if the
children grow up, as they seem likely
to. with the physical characteristics Of
their mothers, nobody will ever know
their exact parentage. The present
agreement is to decide the question by
lot.
The business of selling Autographed
sermons for ministers was formerly con-
fined to England and Scotland. But
now house in Chicago engages in sup
plying this very peculiar class of litera-
ture. For half dollar q clergyman
who is too indolent or too ignorant to
prepare an original sermon can procure
very respectable looking one, which
if placed on his pulpit and read to his
congregation will lead them to believe
it his own composition and penmanship.
The houses that do it do not Autograph
the sermons Of famous diyines, but keep
IN their employ several clergymen who
write sermons to order for the purpose.
The English concerns keep large and
well assorted variety Of sermons on
hand, as they have to meet all manner
of requirements, both a. tn subjects
and the way of treating them. The
apology of those who furnish these SER
mons Is chat the people who hear them
preached will have the advantage of
listening to far better sermons than If
the preachers who use them had de.iv-
cred discourscs of their own manufac-
ture.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26
Glaring at a Sleeper.

THIRTY years ago, one of the popular
lecturers in this country was Henry
Giles, an Irish Unitarian clergyman.
Now, at an advanced age and paralyzed,
he is forgotten, save by those who pro-
vide for his wants. "Templeton," the
Boston correspondent of the Hartford
Courant, tells the following anecdote of
the once-noted man. "He was man
of large self-esteem, and considerable
capacity of self-assertion, which stood
in the way of his success in the ministry.
l call to mind one incident which it was
my fate to witness. Mr.. Giles was en-
gagged one summer Sunday to preach in q
town about ten miles from Boston. He
stood up in the pulpit to announce his
text. Exactly at the same moment, q
tired farmer, who occupied conspicu-
Gus pew in front of the pulpit,
drew red silk handkerchief
from his pocket, deliberately spread
ing it over his own bald head
and forehead to protect them from the
flies, and resigned himself to slumber.
This was too much for the dignity of
Mr.. Giles. He stopped, shut his SER
mon, and began to glare at the somno-
lent parishioner. The latter rested in
serene Inconsistencies, while the rest of
the congregation looked to see how this
singular duel would end. The silence
became protracted, till all at once it APP
peared to occur to the individual who
was the cause of it that it was worth
while to ascertain what it was all about.
He removed his handkerchief and looked
up, only to find himself fixed by the
glittering eye of the preacher, and by
the eyes of everybody else! With q
convulsive start, he abandoned all
thought of a nap that day, and the SER
mon went on. In fact, it was pretty
lively congregation for a hot Sunday"
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26
The widow of James K. Polk, no

The widow of James K, Polk, now
more than eighty years of age, was re-
Gently visited by correspondent Of the
Louisville Courier. Journal, wlio thus
describes her: II was surprised to find
in Mrs. Polk lady of active move
ment, bright and animated face. Gear
and firm voice and quick and respon-
sive memory. She is of medium
height. rather stout but not obese; has
a bright and most pleasing face. with
out the lines and burrows usually ac-
companying great age, and her gray
or dark-blue eyes are even yet spark
ling and full of sweet animation. In
her beaming countenance there still re-
main abundant traces of the rare and
radiant beauty, lit up by earnest vi
vacity, which made her so attractive
and conspicuous thirty odd years ago As
mistress of the Presi dental mansion,
and by courtesy or er c6fciO, first lady
in the land. :"
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26
Our Young Folks.
A CRYSTAL WEDDING.

""Tis time for our crystal wedding"
said Mr. FIR st to his wife,
WlthA suddenly sharp expression,
That cut like twO-edged kniIe.
+" The North Wind must be invited
To bling his friend from the East,
And none of our friends must be sighted
Or fail to appear at the feast" 'i
So then they began TO make ready
With speed, regardless of cost, bird
For the beautiful crystal wedding
OF Mr.. and Mrs. Frost. tH
The North and The East Wind called for
Miss Snow and old Mister Sieet,
And all of tfAt plrty together = hama.
.,. Were sure to have things complete.
In honor of the occasion,
The houses with fringe they drapo
Rich beads and bugles of crystal ,-
Suspended in every shape,
While all the poles and the chipneyS
We're drest IN tran sparent suits,
And the trees were overloaded
With lovelieSt glazed fruits.
The Telegraphs we're invited, ao.. ....
so out OF town couldn't go;
And the Telephones failed to answer
When any one cried "HalloI'
The magnates were not forgotten, s
Who stand In serene repese,
And Franklin made his appearance,
With an iciele on his nose. .fa
There were acres on acres OF icing,
" And wonderful rivers and lakeS;,i ff
Most beautiful caves and grottoes,
And delicate frosted cahes; 81. $50.
While cObweb curtains suspended
Abova the scene, in mid-air, fr'
Lent charm TO the crystal wedding,
That proved such grand affair.
Decanters and tumblers, engraven
With initials of old Jack Frost,
Were scattered about. in profusion-
No telling just what they cost;
And couldn't begin to number
How many from out of town
Came In to this crystal wedding,
And at the banquet sat down.
Old Sol got wind of the matter
just as he was going to bed, ...
And out from between the curtains
He suddenly popped his head
And smiled, as with glowing fingers
He took Jack Frost by the ears,
And loOsened the pearls and diamonds,
That straiRhtway dissolved in tears.
Soon faded the lovely picture, ...
Tue limpd and sparkling sheen, .,s
That seemed, to our raptured vision,
Like unto fairy scene; .i
And some will remember the beauty,
And some will rem ember the cost
OF the wonderful cryst II wedding
OF Mr.. and Mrs. Frost. 5iFs sd.
Josephine Pollard, in ". Y. Independent.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26
RULES OF DESCENT IN THE
g'aac UNITED STATES. ss

AS LAID DOWN By KENT IN 1881.
4. IF one dies owning an estate. -I
1t lineally must gravitate.
If but one heir, 1t will annex s0aa- +.
TO-him or her inspite OF sex; Is t...f
~ If there be more. as well there may, II.
They all shall take "per capita" ls4 ID
.. But if degrees perchance there be,gH
OF different consanguinity,
AS sons and grandsons, all shall take,
And an estatein common make; SIS
But such grandsons have cause totearit,
They'll not an item more inherit
Than wbnld have been theirfather's share
Had he been the living heir.
8. But If the owner meets his fate 49,, ..
81 No lineal heir to his estate,
We've dared the common law to mend,
And his estate shall now ascend.
4. Again: in case the owner do
Lack issue and lack parents too,
His brothers and his sisters shall
Succeed by ruies collateral
IT brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces,
g. They then will take in equal pieces<
If some be dead some living be,
They'll take by nearness OF degree.
8. And in default of father. mother,
And nephews, nieces, sisters, brother,
Or issue, the estate can't fall,
But yet it will rise above them all.
q. Again; and IL perchance there shall
BE NO descendants lfneal--. 4F, gg5t
If parents, brothers sisters, none, f''f
With their descendants meath the sun,
Nor the grandparents. the estate stti 81.
Shall, by unerring legal fate. H4-s
Untothe aunts and uncleS wend,
And those who from them may descend:
If equally related, they
Will take their part "per capita"
But if in different degrees,
They all shall then take "per stripes"
]. Provided, if the intestate had
Derived his living from his Dad,
1t sh Ii to ituIts and uncIeS side,
And issue on the fathers side;
And if none such there be pcrchance,
Then to the uncles and the aunts, t
On the IN ternal side twill go;
And this rule works sc converse"
9. This sth, last rule, it seems to me-
Is rather stiff for poetry.
~. ID. DavidSon, in Southern Lac journal.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26

THERE are only four ladies living
whose husbands were Presidents OF the
United States-Mrs. Polk, Mrs. Tyler
Mrs. Lincoln and Mrs. Grant. l
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26

"A German savant, after much in
vestigation, reports that the average
BRAN of man is ten per cent. larger
than the average brain of woman.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-03-26

The average age of German univer-
sity students is eighteen, of Dutch
twenty and of French seventeen.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1881-05-14
CARRIAGE BUSINESS
REVIVED !

TIE undersigned having started the
| CARRIAGE BUSINESS IN SHEP-
HERDSTOW are prepared to do above
in all its branches in the best manner,
and at the lowest possible rates. Persons
wishing to get new Carriages and Wagons
or have their old ones rvmOdeled equal TO
new. should avail themselves of the OPP
portunily by calling on Us before going
elsewhere. Factory on River Hill rear oi
Stalev's Mill. Respectfully.
SFINKMAN BROS.
P.S. All work warranted rs represen-
ted.
March >. 1881. ~
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1881-05-14
EXCELSIOR.

No. Is, $1,000; No. i, $22 so: No. 25,
s22. so; No. q, $500: No. %, $500: No.
a6, $500; No. 81, $500; No. IS, S32. 90
No. 30, 5000.
Prices quoted on application and repairs
furnised for all patterns of Stoves.
Returning thanks for the liberal patron
age of the past | hope to merit continu-
anee III. c. MARTEN.
Feb. 5, 1851. 1y
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1881-05-14
New Goods
AT THE
POST OFFICE STORE
DUFFIELD'S!

THE undersigned has just laid in new
supply of Spring and Summer Goods
10 he sold ut the lowest possible prices,
consisting in part of CalicOeS, Cottons,
Cottouades. Linens, Towels and Ladies
Dress Goods. Cotton, Batting, Wadding
and Canvass and I full line OF Hose. Socks
ns low as 90 cents per dozen pairs. Also
large stock of Winter Goods which Will
he sold very low.
The Notion department embraces Ladies
and Gents neck wear, Collars, Guns,
ScarfS, Ties, llandherchietS, Ribbons,
Breast-pins, Ear-dropS, Collar and Gun
Buttons, studs, Fans, ParaSols, &c.
AIsoa full line of GROCERIES canned
Fruits, &c, TobaccoS, Snuiis, cigars,
Pipes, Wooden and rinware; Cutler!
and Hardware, Shovcis, Forks, Axes,
IIatchetS, Curry Combs ana Lamp Goods,
Coal Oil, &c.
Men's' Ladies, Misses and Children's
Boots, shoes and Slippers from the city
markets M reduced prices. HARN ESI
SHOES VERY CHEAP.
\ fan line of QUEENSWARE. \ SUI
ncrior line of BOOTS ard SHOES, such
~ Men, Fine Calf, Stitch Downs, Plow
shoes. &C., and Ladies Fine Lasting Cal
lrrS. Slippers. and Childrcu'S Shoes OF all
Kinds. \ full line of GROCERIES,.
COUNTRY PRODUCE AT HIGHEST
PRICES taken i'm exchange for goods.
special attention given to sllOEM Ala
ING. Coarse and Kip Boots and Shoes
and all kinds of Fashionable work done
in elegant order; such rs French Calf
Hand Stitched, and Riding Boots, Con-
.,rcs> Gaitcrs: and the new Windsor Low
Euckle Shoe, or amy style OF Boot or Shoe
desired. Special inducements to Cash
Customers.
Thankful cor past faVors continuance
al the same is respectfully requested.
j. T. HAGLEN.
punicldS. May 20, 1850. II
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1881-05-14
TIE AMERICAN
SEWING MACHINE,

ISM GREAT DEMAN ID BE'At 81 Or
ITS GREET SIMPLICITY,
BEING PARTICULARLY free from all Compile
cations. always ready TO work, and
easily understood by every one,
even the most inexperienced.
Al Machines are guaranteed by the Com
pauy and lis Agents.
T. the lightcSt running Shuttle Ma
chime i'm the world, requiring iitde outlay
rf strength. and >ewS with great speed,
and never ,kipS stitches.
II has u Srlt-Thrcading shuttle, and re-
uuirc, no adjusting of the tension every
1jmra new 6obbn i placed in it. No
lime wasted in ycNatiuuS delays III get
Zinc the shuttle ready to work. II Is al
ways ready.
II !, the most Durable Machine thatcver
claimed public attention, owingto IL SIM
I,lr Arrangement and The careful selection
of the best material.
The Babbin Wound without removing
rhc Strap from the Balauce-Wheci, with
ont Tnthrcadia% the Machine.
Self-Threading above, from the spool TO
the eve of the needle aud has the SELF
THREADING SHUTTLE AND EVEN
JY-ADJUSTED TENSION, which Is
considered by all who have used il TO be
one of the most valuable improvements
that has ever been introduced.
NO OTHERS WILL SUIT YOU SO
WELL. They possess MORE GOOD
POINTS than any other Machines IN the
market, and are, in fact. just what we
claim for thcm-THE BEST IN THE
WORLD.
No better proof Of this is needed than
The fact that the Company have been
o. l.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1881-05-14
Look ENen'ess
Buggies ! Carriages
VEHICLES !
OF EVERY DESCRIPTION!
The Best Variety Of Buggies, Carriages,
and Vehicles generally, ever offered
to the people, and less in price.

desire TO call the attention of the citl-
zens of Berkeley and surrounding coun-
lies to the fact, that | have on hand a
large and elegant supply OF family car
riages, buggics, rockaways, jenny hnds,
and other styles Of vehicles, also wagons
of all kinds and descriptions, which | am
selling lower than other dealers in my
line, either for cash, OH time, or III eX-
change for horses, country produce, "r
secondhand carriages. / ask attention
TO these terms as they are more liberal
than carriage makers usually offer. Times
are hard and money scarce, but want
nv friends and customers to know, that,
nevertheless, they can supply themselves
with carriages.
Persons in want of old carriage wheels
tC fix up their market wagons, or to make
temporary wagons, Will find at my iacto-
ry amy kind they may desire, some OF them
very good and will last long time for
such purposes.
Repairing promptly done as usual. Give
me a call. ii You want anything in my
line; it Will not be my fault if we don't
deal. WIN. +. Gen Elk.
Martinsburg, July j., 1850. y