davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
A Machine,

A new and most ingenious speaking
machine has lately been exhibited by
Herr Faber before the Physical Society,
London. 1t is designed to more per-
fectly initiate, mechanically, the utter
ance of the human voice, by means of
artificial organs of articulation made on
the human model, and it is worked by
keys like a musical instrument. A bel
lows made of wood and India rubber
serves for lungs a small windmill is
placed in front of the vessel to give trill-
ing sounds; the larynx is made of a sin
gle membrane of bippopotamus hide and
India rubber; and a mouth with two
lips, a tongue and an India rubber nose
complete the organs of the apparatus.
Fourteen distinct sounds are uttered by
it, and, by combining these, any word in
any language can be produced-also
laughing and whispering.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
A Scared Ex.Confederate.

"I think, Vest" said Senator Butler
the other day, "that the story you tell
about that fellow in Richmond who went
to have his picture taken is about the
best you can get off. Let's have it."
"Well," said the humorous little Sem
ator from Missouri, "we had a man by
the name of Peter Wilkes, who was
elected to the Confederate Congress from
the Springfield (Mo.) district, and he
came down to the seat of Government
with the air of a Webster about him, and
just looked and talked for all the world
as if the entire responsibility of the cause
rested on his individual shoulders. I
knew him at home, and hence was
spared the anxiety of being disturbed
about his gre atness. 1t was not long
before the close of the WA when Garland
and I were walking down Grace street,
and Peter ran into us. He had a benign
smile on his face, and I knew he had
been engaged in some agreeable sport.
Coming up to us, he sand: Vest, I've
been down street here to a photogra-
piers. Got acardfromh him the other day
asking me to call and sit for a picture.
He wants to get up the whole Confeder-
ate Congress-something historic, eh?'
and Peters waistband stretched per-
ceptibiy at the thought of being thus
embalmed for posterity. Tipping a
wink to. Garland, Isaid:
"'What shop do you mean, Peter?'
"'Oh, downIhere on Main street. CIV
ing a certain number. Just then I
turned to Garland with alarm painted
on my face, and said:
80 why, Peter, you big ass, where
have you Been in the last two weeks ?
Haven't you heard anything about that
historic pictures T? He is a spy in the en-
ploy of the Federal Government. We've
Just about proved it on him, and he's
come to Richmond to photograph all us
members for the Federal gallery; and
will have all our pictures to aid them in
the search and prosecution |! Fact, Gar
hand amt it?'
$3.50 I've heard. Vest he said.
"Well, Peter didn't stop any longer
than it took him to say, MY God i and
in two minutes he was Just out of sight.
That evening he came rushing into my
room with: Vest, you've done me a
great favor, and I'll remember it to my
dying day.,
"fFind your man, Peter?'
"tYou bet 1 did. The internal ras-
cal had that machine of his in the back
room, and was oiling me up. 1 just
went up to him with this trusty six
shooter, Gt was about a yard long, and
put it to his ear, and saysI 1, Shell out!'
Well, he shelled kind O lively like, and
i mashed it into 1000 pieces. No Fed
eral gallery in mine!
"Well, when the surrender came,
Peter was under the conviction that the
whole Federal Government had COM
bined to capture him, and he. set out for
California on foot. Yes, he's out. there
yet, waiting for the animosity against
him to cool down. Washington Cap
itnL
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
Nose and Face.

A somewhat singular fact has been
observed with reference to the shape of
the nose, or rather, the setting of it in
the face, so to speak. To be strictly
correct, from the artists point of view,
the nose should be accurately in the mid
die of the face, and at right angles with
a line from the pupil of one eye to that
Of the. other. AS q matter of fact, it is
rarely Or never found thus placed; it is
almost invariably a little out of 'the
square, and the fact of its being so is
ftenthat which lends a peculiar expires
sion and piquancy to the face. A med
ical writer points out that there are an
atomical reasons why q slight deviation
from the true central line may be ex-
spected and that the nose which is thus
accurately straight between the two ewes
may, after all, be considered an abnormal
one; the only absolutely true and cor
rect organ being, in fact, that which thus
devistes q little to the right or left.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

say: ooh, nothing very important-I
am sorry to trouble you, but-(Clara in
the next room behind the drapery said:
1t will be so meanif he tells now,0 but
really need anew globe and more
chemical apparatus. And think, sir, the
health Of the school would be promoted
by q better method of ventilation"
The Squire said he would lay these
matters before the board at the next
meeting, but doubted if they would con-
sent to SO great an outlay at one time.
The Professor also had doubts, but. did
not say 80.
Somewhat to Clara's dismay the Pro-
fessor staid to tea by her fathers invita-
ton. At the table, as she sat demurely
behind the tray and poured the tea, her
small brother, in a loud whisper (meant
to be very confidential), said: "Grand-
ma, what makes sisters eyes SO awful
red?"
The next day as soon as the rhetoric
class had taken their places, Clara VIII
iams arose and made a very humble
apology for her conduct the day before,
and begged her teachers pardon, which
no doubt was granted.-1he Interior.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
Husbands and Wives.

A good husband makes a good wife.
Some men can neither do without wives
nor with them; they are wretched alone
in what is called single blessedness, and
they make their homes miserable when
they get married; they are like Tomp-
kins' dog, which could not bear to be
loose, and howled when il. was tied up.
Happy bachelors are likely to be happy
husbands, and a happy husband is the
happiest of men. A well-matched couple
carry a joyful life between them, as the
two spies carried the cluster of Eshcol.
They are a brace of birds of Paradise.
Theymultiplytheir joys bysharing them,
and lessen their troubles by dividing
them. This is fine arithmetic. The wagon
of care rolls lightly along as theypull to-
gether;-and when it drags a little heavily,
or there is a hitch anywhere, they love
each other all the more, and SO tighten
the labor.-John PJoughman.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
0ranra Cnlfnre In Florida.

Orange trees are set out in rows u.s.
ually from twenty-five to thirty feet
apart each way, and when budded COM
mence bearing in four years, seedlings in
from seven to ten years. They require
light cultivation two or three times a
year, either with the hoe, harrow or
small turning pillow, drawn by one horse
or mule.
To f~ertilize it is customary to raise
several crops of corn peas each year and
pillow under the vines, which have an
influence similar to our clover. The rich
hammock lands need no ~fertilizing to
grow the orange or lemon, but many
persons raise vegetables between the
trees until they commence bearing. In
this case it becomes necessary to use
commercial fertilizers. In this way, by
close attention, intelligence and industry,
which every business requires, there may
be realized from each acre in vegetables
from 800 to $400 per year. When the
orange tree is of full bearing age and well
cared for, each years crop is worth
about $1,000 per acre, about equal to
fifty acres of wheat. 1 have heard of
some groves exceeding this; for instance,
the Spurs Grove near Lake Monroe, of
four and one-half acres, yielded a few
years since, as I m informed, seven
thousand five hundred dollars, and Col.
Harris fine grove of about seven acres,
near Palatka, yields an annual income OF
from ten to twelve thousand-a nice in
come. Uncleaned lands are worth from
S. to $50 an acre, according to quality
and proximity to towns and Transports
ton, and those that are desirable are
being rapidly taken up, as there Is an
immense influx of population and capital,
especially of our northern friends, who
usually have the faculty of putting
their money where it will. do the most
good" Budded trees cost from $25 to
800 per 100. To clear the ground costs
from $40 to $40 per acre, and fencing
from IS to $40 per acre.
An orange grove of full bearing age,
and in a fancy location, and having a
good water protection, which some think
important, sells for 81, 1000 or $1,000 per
acre, and even at this price yields a good
interest on the money invested.
have endeavored to give the import
ant facts tr%uthfully. Want of experience
and limited observation may have led me
into inaccuracies. / have no hesitation
in saying I believe that On intelligent,
industrious and patient man may, in
ten or twelve years, in Florida, make
with almost q certainty, a fortune of from
$50, 600 to 800, 600. This appear in
credible, but I think it is true and know
it has been done.-Fyoridd Letter in
Kansas City Times.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
From the Australian Bush.

While fifteen cents was paid in
Queensland, Australia, for a kangaroo
scalp, they came in at a great rate,
35, 800 scalps being paid for in a year
and a half. A reduction of the rate to
twelve has made all the difference in
favor of the kangaroos. 1t is estimated
that a kangaroo eats as much grass as a
sheep, and destroys as much as it eats by
the skill with which it picks out the
most ~succulent heritage.
The bush of Australia is so overfed
by the multiplying of wild horses that
they have to be shot down in common
with rabbits and kangaroos. In one
district an Arab stallion got away some
thirty years ago, and was never recap
tured. He was a chestnut, and took a
couple of thoroughbred colts with him,
and it has been remarked that a large
proportion of the wild horses of the dis
trict are of his color. Horses believed
to be very old are occasionally seen far
away in distant ranges. One man has
shot 5000 horses in two years.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
The STYLE.

Though it would seem that the people
Of all countries are equally vehement in
the pursuit of. this phantom, style, yet in
almost all of them there is a strange
diversity in opinion as to what consti-
tutes its essence; and every different
class, like the pagan nation, adores it
under q different form. In England an
honest citizen packs up himself, his fam
lily, and his style in a buggy or tim
whisky, and rattle away to spend Sun
day. A baronet requires a chariot and
pair; a lord must needs have a barouche
and four; but q duke, o! a duke, cannot
possibly lumber his style along under a
coach and six, and. half q score of foot
men. This style has ruined the peace
and harmony of many a household, for
no sooner do they set up for style, than
all the honest old comfortable sam cere-
monte furniture is discarded, and you
stalk cautiously about, amongst the un-
comfortable splendor of Grecian chairs,
Egyptian tables and Etruscan vases.
The vast improvement in furniture de-
mands an increase in the domestic estab-
hshment, and a family that once re-
quired two or three servants for conven-
fence, nov employs half a dozenfor style.
Bell Bfazen was one OF these patterns
of style; and whatever freak she was
seized with, however preposterous, was
implicitly followed by all who would be
considered as admitted in the stylish
arcana. She was once seized with a
whim-wham that tickled the whole court.
She could not lay down to take an after
moons loll but she must have n SER
rant to scratch her head, two to tickle
her feet, and fourth to fan her delecta-
BILE person while she slumbered. The
thing took-it became the rage, and not
a sable belle in all Hayti but what in
sisted upon being famed and scratched
and tickled in the true imperial style.
Sheer not at this picture, my most ex-
cellent townswomen, for who among you
but are daily following fashions equally
absurd.-ITving.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
OUR O FOLKS.
ny FAvoREEE


/ know she INIT pretty,
Her cheeks are much too pink,
Her eyes and nose are all one shade
Of dreadful India ink.
Her hairs too short and kiuky
| cannot keep 1t neat;
No wonder, since It's Rawlings
From grandps's stocking feet.
But, ohl she's such a conforti
She never Is too nice
To go and paddle In the brook,
Or help me make mud pies.
We dig beds in the garden,
Pick strawberries on the hill,
Play birds nest in the sweet new hay,
Or in the grain, play mill.
If 1 am sick or sorry,
She takes away the pain,
And when Pm Tad, and mamma scolds.
She makes me good again.
L tell her charming stories,
When we,re In bed at night;
And don't min the dark at all. j"
It's most a. good rs night.
have another darling.
A beauty Edith Grace
With lovely, curling, golden hair,
AND rosy, waxen face.
But she wears lace and satin;
She can't play In the dirt;
Nor wet, nor anything, for fear
Her fine clothes may be hurt.
I love my Edith toay of,
But, i'll tell the truth,
Come close, and let me whisper it,
l love my precious Ruth,
Because she goes where I 90,
Does everything I do;
1 love her cause she's everyday,
Now tell me, shouldn't your
-Yoath's Con.paasoA
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
Well Qualified.

One day Judge Dudley Marvin, who
was a famous lawyer for more than a
quarter of a century, was accosted by a
man who said "Ihave a boy whom I
want youto take and make a lawyer of"
Chow old is he? asked Mr.. Marvin.
"He's 1S years old, stout and rugged;
he's got a pair Of lungs like a bellows"
replied the father. "Has he any other
qualifications ?" "Yes, sir ; he's got
the greatest qualification of all" replied
the father "he's the confoundedest liar
in town. I thought, when I heard you
in the court room just now, hat it
wouldn't take very long for Sam to come
pretty nigh up to you"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
III MARKETS.

1a%IIy: {: se ss.; %; s ESs ae1r s: s SSs 8 81 ii s e. e;
led, 81 is@l Isl No. 3 red, 81 12al IA; No. ? old
amber, 81 10ai liz. Corn-No. 2 mixed, 521ac.;
NJ. yellow, 49Hac. 0atseNo; white, 42S424c.;
1ey-Prime new fall, sote.@s 90. Hay Choice
timothy, sls 0o@14 90. Hemp, sl2o@l25. Hogs
SS5' rs P ~ SGgo 20; butchers park. 'e SIS 20 LARD La d,
101ac; PoULTRY Spring chickens: 81 1898 90;
old chickens, s. 25@l 90: WooL-Unwashed me
washed, common, sOgs2c.; good to choice, S5937c.
FRUITS AND VEGETABLES Raspberries- Choice
S Sh.hs., Sc S SSss 60 per stand an 6s red; 50 50 5O o. 60 sf,P per
Watermelons, S25 90 per 100 for choice Georgia on
track, and IS 90 more from store. Peaches Choice
Plums-Wildg goose plums, 81 Ol@3 90 per stand for
good tn prime. Apples-Prime 10 choice, 81 COG
8 90. Potatoes The market is stronger for prime
10115c. more from store. Tomatoes - Prime to
choice, 81 5a@3 90 per bushel. Cabbage, 81 259
1 90 per barrel.
LoUIsvILLE-Cotton-The MAJ ket is firmer at
10Hc. Flour-Extra family, SO 75g Is; A No. l,
IS lo96 so; choice fancy. s6O0@6 so. Wheat-Is firm
2 mixed, 4sc. Oats No. 2 white. 40c No. 2 mixed,
S9c; Rye-No. ?, 81 90. Hay, SIG oOSls 90. Mess
pork. ST. so, Bulk Meats Shoulders, 6 soc, clear
ders, 7c.; clear rib sides, 9 Csc; clear sides, loc.
Hams-Sugar-cured, 11A@1lhc. Whisky, s. oS;
TO IS 60.
NEW YORK. Cotton Middling upland.
IL Slice; middling Orleans, II 7-l6c. Flour-Good
to choice Western and S ate, IS 30@6 rs; common
to choice extra family, 81 7O@6 10; Minnesota
patent process. SC 25@s 90. Grain-Wheat-New
Texas red, 81 2S@1 %; ungraded winter red, 81 90
81 27h; No. 3 winter red, 81 goal 22H:, No. 2
winter red, 81 2614@1 26A; No. 1 ' winter red, 81 30
al 81; No. 2 white, 81 81 Corn UDgraded- 479
56Hc; No 3, 57Lc No. 2, 55@55%c. Mess pork.
SIT %. Lard, 11.S9@11 S5c.
BALTIMORE -Wheat-No 2 winter red, 81 239
l 231S. Western mixei. 541s955c. Oats
White Western, 37@3sc.; mixed Western: 35@36c.
Rye-Good to prime, s2@S5c. Hay Prime to
choice, ST. 02@20 90.
LIVE STOCK.
CINCINNATL.-CATTLE-Commop, 81 2593 90;
fair to medium. IS 25@4 o.; common to fair ship
pers, 81 9O95 Is; light yearlings and calves. 81 509
8 Is. HoGs-Selected butchers, SIS O096 %; far
to good mixed packers, S. 50G6 20; fair 10 good
light, IS 7O@6 10; stock hogs. 81 5095 25: SHEEP
Common to fair, 2%@3hc; good to choice, $40
4.60c.; good stock wethers, 3I94Hc. LAMBS
Common to fair, 4Z95c.
NEW YORK-Dressed beef sides, 7I@SHc. for
Texas and Colorado beef, and 9G9%c- for native
steers. Sheep and L~ambs-Common TO good lambs,
IS 5o@7 so, live weight; Kentucky lambs, Sc S7H9
8 90; State and New Jersey dressed mutton, Is 5o9
8 so for ordinary to prime.
INDIANAPoLIs.-Hogs-Heavy shipping, Sc rs
@6 IS per 100 lbs. Workers, Sc 10@6 20 Cattle
Common to prime shippers, IS. 00@6 90; butchers,
So oO@4 80; stockers and feeders, IS 5O94 so.
EAST LIBERTY, PA.-Hogs Philadslphias,
IS 1895 so per leo lbs; Workers, IS 1896 rs. Sheep
So COCA IS per 100 lbs.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
Did not Understand Journalism.

I recollect sitting at a table in London
beside the editor of a leading journal:
He said: 81 am in distress; L have lost
one of my regular writer's" I did not
know about Journalism at the time, so I
remarked: 81 suppose you will have
to get another" He replied: "Get
another! I will have to get three, and I
will be surprised if at the end of a year
one of these three writers does as we'll as
the writer I have lost. "-GoldUin Smith,
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
Great Merlr.

All the fairs give the first premiums and spec
ial awards of great merit to Hop Bltters as the
purest and best family medicine, and we most
heartily approve of the awards for we know
they deserve it. They are now on exhibition at
the State Fairs. and we advise all to test them.
See another column.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

AT THE conclusion of the ceremony at
a marriage in this city, a sweet innocent
sat down to the piano and thoughtfully
struck up, "What Shall the Harvest be?"
and could not understand what the
others were laughing at.-Bowting
Green Democrat.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
Right.

When everybody says a "thing is SO,
it must be So" On this point Mr.. A.
81. Lyman, Druggist, Manistee, Mich,
writes: Every one who tries st. Jacobs
Oil says that it is the best remedy ever
used for rheumatism. Mr.. White, a GUS
after having employed every
known specific for rheumatism was cured
st. Jacobs OiL.-HndianapoHs Indi-
ana Farmer.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
BABY,s

Ny baby boy sat on the floor,
His big blue eyes were full of wonder,
For he had never seen before
That baby in the mirror door /.
What kept the two, 30 near. asunderf
He leaned toward the golden head
The mirIo or border framed within,
Until twin cheeks, like roses red,
Lay side by $ de, then softly said:
"Ican,t get out; can't you come in :"
-Atdntd Consultation.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
rruth and soberness.

What is the best family medicine in the world
to regulate the bowels, purify the blood, remove
costiveness and biliousness, aid digestion and
stimulate the whole system? Truth and sober
ness compels us to answer, Hop Bitters, being
pure, perfect and harmless. See "Truths" in
another column.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
barnard Manufacturing Company.

Mr.. Isaac L. Hart, Superintendent,
No. 3 Ashton street, a v I have used
that superior remedy, st. Jacobs Oil, in
a severe case of rheumatism in my arm,
and its effect was wonderful, having ban
ished, after q thorough trial, all pain,
leaving my arm as well as ever.-F6U
RiUer (Mass.) Daily Herald.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

INDIGESTION dyspepsia, nervous prostraton
and all forms of general debility relieved by
taking MENsMAN's PEPToNIzED BEEF Tonic. the
only preparation of beef containing its entire
nutritious properties. 1t contains blood-mak-
ing, force-generating and hfe-sustaining prop,
critics; is invaluable in all enfeebled conditions,
whether the result of exhaustion, nervous pros
tration, overwork, or acute disease, particularly
If resulting from pulmonary complaints, Cas-
well, Hazard & Co., proprietors, New York.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

HENDERSON was at the. theater the
other night. cit was a burlesque, a
take-off, wasn't it?" asked Smith.
eyes," said Henderson, ''that's what it
was, I guess. They had taken off about
everything they dared to."-Boston
Transcript.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

A HOUSE painter falling from the third
story of a house in Maine, where the
prohibition law is enforced, and being
given a glass of water to revive him,
~piteously asked Chow far has a fellow
got to fall before you let him have brandy
in this town."
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

"MIRRoRs should never be hung.
says a writer on domestic economy,
''where the sun will rest upon them"
and she should have added, nor where
the daughters could rest upon them
either. There should be no discrimina-
tion in favor of either sex.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

TIE New York obelisk is little more
than half as big as the largest in Rome,
but bigger than that in London. There
are thirty-one of them scattered about
Europe, among which New York's ranks
twenty-third in size.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

TwENTY-s1x distinct companies have
been started since December, 1879, to
work the gold mines in South India,
with a subscribed capital of $15, 600, 600,
half of which has been paid for the
mines.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

"IN what condition was the patriarch
Job at the end of his life ?" asked q Sun
d~ay-school teacher of a q~uiet-looking
boy at the foot of the class. dead"
calmly replied the boy.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
HENRY,S C1RROLTC sALvE

Is the BEST sALvE for Cuts, Bruises, Sores, Ulcers,
Salt Rheum, letter, Chapped Hands, Chilblains, Corns,
and all kinds of Skin Eruptions, Freckles and Pimples.
Get HENRY,s CARBoLIc SALvE, as all others are
counterfeits. Price IS cents.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

DRUGGISTS and physicians recommend and
prescribe Lydia E. Pinkharn's Vegetable Com
pound for all female complaints.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

K1DNEY-WoRT always relieves and cures the
worst cases of piles and constipation.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14
0The Gods e

"Ihc G0ds Help
those who help themselves" and Nature inva-
riably helpB those who take Warmers Safe Kid
ney and Liver Cure.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

DIR. GREEN'S OXYGENATED BITTERs
Is the best remedy for Dyspepsia, Biliousness, Malaria,
Indigestion and Diseases of the Blood, Kidneys, Liver,
Skin. etc.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

r ADY Agents wanted in every State and County for
IL Rubber Specalties for Ladies. Quick sales; good
profits. Address G.. Brinkerhof, 142 Fulton ST., NY.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

DIR. MOTIFS LIVER PILLS are the best cathartic
Regulators.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

r ATARI SNUFF cures all affections of tn
mucuous membrane of the head and throat.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1881-07-14

Bed-BuEs, Reaches,
rats. cats, mice, ants, flies, insects, cleared out
by Trough on Rats" 15c., druggists.