The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1881-05-04
THE QUEEN OF SHEBA.
why am UnquaIiHea EsetraeiiOu VTas De-
IaAaHdeal.

4
lFrom The san Francisco POst.I
''I want to see the boss liar who runs
| this libelous sheet, roared a muscular
| looking young man of the baseball spe-
cies, walking into the Office of the Post
last Monday morning.
''The Managing Editor is out, said
the Office boy, hastily getting behind the
counter.
'.'Blast the editor" growled the stran-
ger, rapping on the counter with the big
end of his four-foot club. ST want to
see the head pirate-the proprietor. The
fellow that your paper says wants to be
held responsible for those internal lies
about the Carnival people in last Satur-
days Post
Through the open door of the inner
office came a subdued rustling sound, as
though terTior was chasing rat into
hole, followed by a silence that might
have been cut with knife. -.#
"He's out too, replied the boy.
"Gol dern the luck y said the muscu
lar party, much annoyed. 81 came In q
purpose to batter him with this club" ..
He will be sorry to have missed you,
said the Office boy, soothingly "Isn't
your paper left regularly?" 81
Paper be everlastingly blanked to
blanknation," thuudered the visitor.
''My sister is the Queen of Sheba!"
'"The Queen of what ba?"
~ ''Of Sheba, idiot! Don't you under
stand ?" -. o a... .'HE .
"Once more, for the beer!'' said the
Office boy, leaning forward
''Why, the Queen of Sheba-up at the
Carnival, mean. She was brought
home from the matinee day before yes
terday, in a hack and fits. This is what
did it, and the aggrieved brother hauled
out a marked copy of our superior family
journal (only fifteen cents week by car
rier), and pointed to the following para
graph
lar bill, lost by poor widow washer
woman, than say anything unkindly per-
sonal in this article, but, all the same,
we mean to overhaul sacred history the
first chance we get and ascertain whether
there is definite scriptural authority for
supposing that the Queen Of Sheba had
access to unlimited quantities Of limburg-
er cheese. Unless we find that fact fully
substantiated we shall be reluctantly
forced to conclude the counterfeit pre-
sentiment of that potentate up at Mission
and Eighth to be an atmospheric fraud
and miasmic mockery."
''NIust be some mistake" softly sug-
gested the Office boy aH 5.E
= ''NTistake be blowed, said the queens
brother, brandishing his club to the ex-
treme discomfort of the cashier. ''Its
an internal, miserable lie. Ny sister
never eats cheese, and, besides, she chews
cardamom seeds and things. Never ate
hmburger in her life. 3" "t
ST do, said the office boy, consokngly.
$50 see, said the outraged party,
pushing the boys nose around with the
end of his club '"The minute I read
that cowardly slahder, I just went out to
the wood-pile and picked out the knot
test stick I could find, and I Whitfield it
down at this end for a square grip
When win the old vampire be in-Tl
wait for him?" ...,r
A couple Of gentle taps came from
within.
''Heu be gone two months, said the
boy. ...
The knocks were repeated more vigor-
ously. Ea.-.. -. .ar..s.
81 mean two years, continued the
youth hastily. sHe's away off, on q
ranch, omewhere-building q new sta
ble-one for mules Ten to one he never
gets back at all. "
''Just my Internal hard luck, - mutter-
ed the athlete. SIS there anybody here
who would like to step out and represent
him for few minutes 2"
But there was nobody who could spare
the time.
"All right, said the representative of
the Scriptural rule 81 Will now go and
have lot of baseball spikes screwed in
to this club, and if there isn't an uncon-
ditional retraction in next Saturdays
paper, will drop in again Uncondi-
tional mind!' and after savagely kick
ing newsboy off the doorstep, he shouI-
dered his redwood and walked off.
As he disappeared in the mazes of
the proprietor emerged
from beneath table, and, clasping the
intelligent Office boy to his breast, raised
bis salary two dollars year.