The Emporia weekly news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1881-1889, 1881-07-07
HERE Ann THERE.

Col. Bob Ingersoll thinks that New
Mexico needs less holy water and more
rain.
We should suppose life WAS a terror
down east, where they have such violent
cyclones.
1t now appears that Jay Gould pur-
chased st. Louis for the purpose of OBJ
tanning ground TO build u mammoth
union depot.
IroquOis does very we'll as far as he
goes, bna what Kansas is shrieking tor
is somelhing fast enough 70 best light
ning-rOd pcddler.
The anti-masOns have found Morgaa's
bones again. The editors who keep
track OF the Benders should brace up or
they will get left.
The old town of Santa Fe, New Mex
leo, has doubled its population during
the past year, and the Americans now
constitute majority Of its Inhabitants.
One of the cruelties charged upon
Oscar Merritt, of Detroit, in his wife's
complaint for divorce was, that he would
not let her put her cold feet on him to
warm them.
The comet is said to be receding from
the earth at the astonishing rate of
100000 miles per day. The shy. thing
must have seen Susan d. Anthony gazing
at il in her night dress.
The man who gave publicity 20 the
story about Tennessee woman giving
birth TO seven children in one day, has
secured highly lucrative position as a
writer of circus advertisements.
The relict OF the late Commodore
Nun is said TO be rich woman. But
what are all the allurenents Of wealth
TO widow who is not big enough TO
wear more than yard OF craper a.
The anii-moaOpOlists recognize new
germ of danger to the liberties of the
people in the well authenticated report
that Jay Gould has already absorbed a
controlling interest in the new comet
New Haven Register: "Prairie dogs
are said To dig 800 feet for water. We
know q great many men who dig twice
that distance about eleven O'Clock every
morning, but they don't dig for water. u
| An exchange says the meAnest mar
on record is in New York. He invited
. night policeman TO take drink, and
slyly put into 1t powerful stimulan
which kept the poor Waterman awAka
ali night.
Advices from China state that Chris
tlsAity is rapidly spreading in the Celes
tial Empire. If Denis Kearney ex
poets to remain in politics, he will soOa
be obliged to substitute some new issu'
for the -HeaGhen ChiHee." OH
There seems TO be something rottel
in North Carolina Wheu guXgnmen
contract calling for ga, 00O is stopped b
United States marshal becaase Tia
work could be done for $50. Mort
Carolina is Democratic state.
The editor who first spoke Of Col. DaE
: r Anthony as possible candidate 70
D governor in 1882. has qualifications as
4 humorist which Il would be little shOI
/ Of criminal to fail to develop In the cnE
e genial capacity Of a funny man on som
l metropolitan journal.
! It has been fully demonstrated thI
electricity can be bottled up and carrie
( from town 10 town. Tins affords
I thoroughly intelligent solution Of III
d shocking condition in which the ave
age Topeka citizen invariably return
Il home from visit To Kansas City.
An exchange gives this cure for snail
9 bite: take hot hogs lard. and appl
directly to the wound. drying in vii
hot iron" That's all very nice, but
" the exchange" thinks it can substitu
this new tangled cure for snake bit
e Tor the '4old reliAble" IN Kansas, we fel
it will be mistaken.
The old battle Geld Of Bail's Bluff
:, infested by ratilesnakes. A few d,
ago q lady who was visiting tbs sp
: said, what . smell OF cacmbeFsP' q
Odor indicating the presence Of q
snakes A gentleman wing heard h
words rescued her from danger.
Il Is said thAG during the recent via
:. storm At Washington the EeEToE-sarickl
a. people Of that city were seen flying
a the capitol from ali directiOas- n
h most ignorant see1lea % uRdeEstal
y that the structure which had Withsto'
NJ the atmospheric bursts OF ParsoQ De 1
AIatxyr General VVeAvars and oaher r,rs,,
inent GFcenbackers. could tackle 4
es clone with . tOlerably fair show Of hOl
mr. Ing the fort
v, A considerable amount Of cleric
is time has been devoted recently in 4
as treasury department At Washington
". sending out stereOsyped negative repll