Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1881-05-02
Punishment of Children.

weeks ago.
She does not 60 about as some moth
ers are too apt to do, making complaints
to promiscuous persons about her chill
dren, but was telling me confdentially
of her grievance; and [ am not going to
give any names, so shall not be betray-
ing her confidence.
l wonder how many other mothers
are in this dilemma.
One child of the family seems an odd
one, and punishments--ar rewards that
are successful with the others, totally
fail in this case.
1t seems to be ansexperiment anyway
this bringing up children rules have to
be laid aside. No wonder so many try
to shirk the responsibilities of maternity.
So many make grievous mistakes, that
the great wonder is that SO large num-
ber grow to manhood and womanhood,
and make such good, trustworthy citi-
zens.
Some children must be driven, some
coaxed, while others seem wholly in
| different to either measure.
Those are the hard cases to manage
like my friends twelve-year-old-daugh-
ter. She is an ordinary, good-natured
child, but very needless, and. conse-
quently, not trustworthy.
have met dozens like her, affection
ate, unsel6sh, readily promising obedi-
ence, but at the first temptation, for
getting all and yielding at once, yet in
stantly sorry, once the wrong is COM
mltted.
Can any one tell US what can be done
in such case g.? Such child is to be
pitied, not willfully bad, but seemingly
void of will power to say mo" to the
tempter.
What will become of them if the hab-
it is allowed to grow with their growth ?
What worse than useless men and
women they will be !
Where whipping does no good, and
coaxing is forgotten, what can we do =?
| know mother who deprived child
of music lessons, another who decided
to try exile, and so took a daughter
from school and sept her into the coun-
try for year-only permitting her to
come home twice during the term of
punishment-she of course was deprived
of the advantage of the excellent city
school privileges. Now | doubt the
efficacy of either quoted punishment.
Punishment should be felt keenly at the
time, not in after years. A parent has
no more right to cripple child mentally
than physically: yet when a case came
to our notice few years ago, where a
| father had broken a child's arm in pun
ishment. we called that parent a brute.
In either of the cases above mentioned,
the punlshments were but little felt at
the time; it was not till after years
placed them at disadvantage, that
they felt acutely the lack of musical
ability, or the humiliation of being a
year behind classmates at school. That
time could never be recalled, nor could
extra endeayors restore them to the
place lost. met middle-aged lady
last summer, an invalid, who has for
years been engaged in working for the
advancement of poor children.
She said to me, More children are
ruined and lost by lack of praise than
the contrary. A sensitive child should
never be publicly rebuked. A fault had
better 60 unnoticed till the reprimand
can be given IN private, and children
should be encouraged to do right for the
happiness it will of itself bring them,
not driven to, for fear of punishment. u
Then we spoke of a mutual acquaintance
who getting tired of trying to manage
his young son, sent him away to Reform
School, and there the boy was taken
sick and died.
She said, 81 shudder when | hear Of
such cases." Then she told me he,
own experience.
"When | was GIRL" said she, Cd
lived with an aunt-my parents being
dead. | was one of those children whom
nobody loved. l think that is why
love these little forlorn ones, for l knew
what it was to hunger for love-
"Aunt Sarah had one child, a girl
two years my senior
'She was one of the good, amiabl,
sort, which made my disposition thu
more hateful by contrast. At ever,
act of fresh disobedience. aunt woult
threaten reform school. upon me.
81 never believed she would execut
the threat, but once when | had triet
her more than common, she packed M
off to q private reformatory institution
in neighboring town. | did not rebel
| did not care. l staid there tw
, months.
5 when | went home again all my an
ger and pride were aroused against her
| had learned more of evil by assoeia
tion with others more vicious than nv
!, self. vowed inwardly that l neye