Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1881-09-15

bounds. which sets him TO wondering
where in thunder the bounds ars. OBJ.
lection follows objection, and each one:
is promptly sustained. He wonders
why it is that free and independent
people will tolerate such one-sided
Justice. He lunges ahead blindly now,
until he becomes so confused that he
does not know whether he is practic-
ing attorney with gilt sign. or fly
wheel on steam wocd-saw. Finally
he runs out of questions, and. with a
sigh of relief. or something. tells the
witness That's all" So he grinds
through. and at last the prosecutor
rises and proceeds to address the jury.
in mastery style. As he proceeds he
picks up the evidence adduced by the
defense into particles fine enough TO be
incorporated into Goldfish balls. The
youthful Blackstone wrestler begins to
feel uneasy as his mind reverts to the
fact that in few moments he must de-
liver his maiden speech. He wishes
the prosecutor would hold his grip and
keep it until time to adjourn court, feel
ing satisfied that he could make splen-
did speech the next day, after nights
fighting on the evidence. He tries to
remember what the witness swore to,
but cannot recall the evidence to
save his life. The prosecutor fl
nally winds up with grand
peroration, and. as he says: "And in
conclusion. gentlemen of the jury
the youth nervously fingers his
moustache, if he happens to have one
about him, and wishes he had never
begun the abominable business. Cold
chills are lingering him all over the back
as if measuring him for 4 new shirt, and
his spinal column acts like it was tired
and wanted TO sit down a while. Like
Banquo's ghost, the lump in his throat
won't down by any obstinate majority,
and he swallows at it and wonders
what he is going to say and how long
it will take him to say it. As the prose-
cutor calmly takes his seat the young
lawyer rises and moves to the front He
dare not look at the audience, and tries
to imagine there is no one in the room
but himself and the twelve sphinxlike
forms in the jury-box. The eyes of
each Juror are fixed upon him, and he
would almost relingnish his hope of
Heaven if some one would raise cry
of fire to divert their attention until he
getsa start. Finally he shrugs his should
ers and manages to remark, '.Gen-
tlemeu of the (swailows) jury" Very
good. He then surveys them moment,
and every man in the box thinks he is
endeavoring to read their thoughts;
but he isn't. He il wishing to gracious
he could read his own thoughts. At
last he strikes out and goes for them
about their intelligent looks. and now
he feels that his clients interests are
safe in their hands. At the same time
he feels serious doubts as to their
safety in his own hands. He worries
through his speech with an average Of
two swallows at that lump to the sem
tence. The prosecutor closes the ar
gument and the case goes to the jury,
who retire to secluded room to chew
tobacco and ask each other what they
thought of it. 1t so happened that the
flimsy testimony against the accused
warrants verdict OF not guilty. where
upon the amateur grasps his clients
hand, whispers: 81 Ii was hard fight,
but | rot you out OF it ~ Then he
rises, loads up enough law books to
swamp a mud scCw.. casts n triumphant
look at the Prosecuting Attorney. who
smiles pleasantly in return, and walks
slowly and maiestically down the aisle
to the door, with as much dignity as if
he owned Western railway. Oh, you
can't deny it, even you old veterans
you've all been there !"--Qaincy Mod
ern ArgO.
Il T,.l