The National tribune., 1881-09-17
PLAYING AT CIRCUS.
Albert b. Paine.

Mr. Biggs was sauntering around the Cm0I
Depot as the evening train came in from Buffalo
when surprised with:
why, Bggs. How are you, old fellow ?
Well, if it amt Jack Duncan! Glad to see
YOU Come right along home with me-.
Ne Biggs, I'm too dirty. Been showed IN on
the road helped shovel snow, slept in bar
EOszn: havn't had change of shirts for a week.
Never nlind appearances nobody at the house
nv wife took the three p. m. for an all night
with her sister in Painesville. I'll furnish a
skirt, and I've got fine bathroom in the house.
Come, now: you haven't honored me since [
married.
We'll, since the wife is away I'll surrender.
We1l have regular rooster night of it"
Jack Duncan is a bachelor, with a holy horror
of women. Feminine presence paralyzes and
stultifes him.
Here's the linen" showing him into the bath
room few minutes later There's the bath
all ready. Now shape up while go down to Joe
Richards and order up one of our old college
lunches Nobody in the house: Just splash
around at pleasure
Biggs departed, leaving the door ajar. Jack
did not notice it in his eagerness for emersion.
He had Just tumbled out and resumed his pan
<sIoons when ne heard footsteps approaching the
door. Thinking it was Big,ss returning he siezed
the freshly laundried shirt, opening at the back.
and iammed his head into it. 1t came down over
his faoe, completely blindfolding him. and the
starch haffled his efforts to tunnel through.
Just a. he commenced Straddlng around with
suspenders dangling he heard 3 rustic that con-
.ypaled his blood. The door ~queaked. and a
cherry VOICE said
Now I've got YOU Mr.. Biggs The train left
me, so / made a call.or two and came back. |
heard Won PLAYING sea lion in the bathroom as
entered the house; got the buggy whip and
slipped up TO pay YOU back for everlaStngly teas
Ins ne Now I'm ring master, dear hubby.
Move lively" And she popped her whip in a
business way that suspended the bachelors ami
nation. The shirt hid his face, and, taking his
silence for spousal submission to the joke, she
began:
Gentleman and ladies: Mademoiselle Biggs,
queen of the sawdust ARENA will now introduce
her handsome and perfectly trained trick mule,
Hubby Darling He will walk the arena on his
hind fee1 with his head and fOrepawS shrOuded
in a linen canopy. Come now, Hubby! Hoop la
hoop la" she chirped, fetching him wipe with
the whip that made his bare feet spank the floor
like clog dancer.
Timber up Hubby. Lively now. Up, up,
up" and she underscOred the last "up" with 4
briar cut, making Hubby Darling skip so impul-
sively that darling's dangling suspender swished
about like donkey's tail, and his hands dove
snstincsIy to the preservation Of his unStayed
pantsleons
d" blindfolded Hubby Darling 10 prevent him
climbing the center pole He's the trickieSt
donkey that ravOrts the magic circle. The peer
less prance of the canvas pavilion. Hoop la
Zip she takes him. What beautiful action
Yet. .fellOw-countrymen, never curry him down
with ANYTHING but this silk k-blossomed snapper
Hoop La! (POpkerslash.)
q cover his ears that he may not offend the
most fastidious: they resemble cross between
mail bag and the human appendage. Hoop. la
Zip, Zip Let the Golden COrnet Band dish III
Fishers Hornpipe red-hot and highly favored
and Hubby Darling shall"
B-b-beg your p-pardon, m-madam, Sputterec
the victim. as his head and voice SHOT Out al the
shirt Then
She started, stopped,
Spe-bound, amazed
The whip she dropped