Litchfield enquirer., 1881-05-26
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 CLIPPINGS.
Le Duc's American tea does not seem to

x Le Duc's American tea does not seem to draw.
 To wear trousers in Abyssinia is one of the brooches of etiquette.
 Base bah is old as the world, as is. proven by the very first line in .'Genesis; ~ h the big inning" K G41 # E When . mans appliesfor ai:uation as poy
 liceman, It is supposed he has a taste for club life.
 fla harness maker kicks up a row. can it
 be said that there is danger from the horse collaref
 It is now believed that the oleogargarine factories put hair in their goods thus render. ing it more difficult of detection than ever. "Did you call your brother liar ?" asked
 the stern parent, and the culprit replied:
 Well, I said he a was g. sewing machine agent" E Sad case The girl whowas locked ip her
 lovers arms for three hodrs explains that if
 wasn't her fault She claims he forgot the combinasien.
 The differences between Farragut and girl smitten by cohbler's charms is that the one was dashed to the mast, and the other is mash ed to the last.
 'Now, Sammy, have you read the-story of Jeseph?" 'Oh, yes, uncle" "Wel, then, what wrong did they do when they sold their brother?" "The sold him too cheap" N A lady who had quarreled with her bald headed lover said in dismissing him: ''What is delightful about you. my friend, is that I have not the trouble of sending you back any locks of hair." @ #s6#%E g F9 When the Derrick man put on his last years ] white vest he found a roll of bills in one of the pockets amounting to about $120, which he had forgotten. P. S.-None of them were receipted.
 Presence of mind. Tommy (who has seen Janet's lover kissing ber)-"Oh, kiss me, too Janet!" Janet lcOnscious of mammals ap- preaching footsteps -'sDont say kiss < me two,' Tommy. Say kiss me twice!'" A news item says: ''Beaconsfeld's photo graph was buried with him." And yet Bea- consfield was not so very homely. Now if George Eliot's photograph had been buried with her, we should not have been surprised.
 Pierre Vernon, in recent article en C The Age of Adulteration, relates that wine mer- chant, giving death bed inj functions to his son, said: "Always bear in mind that wine may be made with anything-even (with aamelan- choly smile)-grape juice" A
 A gentleman in Albany has rented a vacant lot near his residence, fenced it in and fitted it up as a playground for the boys of the neighbordood. He was bound to have one spot in the town that the boys would keep away from.
 "And did Your late husband die in hope of a blessed immortality, Sister Wigg1ns?'' in- quired the new minister, who was making his first call cn a fair widow of his congregation "Bless you, mol" was the. mournful response, Che died in Chicago" t#
 Under the head of Religious" the Utica Observer prints poem about "Threading Needles" The Observer has evidently been misled by overhearing the discourse of man trying to thread cue, and supposedhis remarks were of a religious nature.
 There is no occasion for swearing outside of newspaper office, where it is very useful in proof reading. and indspensaby necessary in getting forms to'press. It has been known also, to materially assist the editor in looking over the paper after it is printed But other wise it is very foolish and wicked habit.
 A young man who visited Sunday school was asked at the close of the lessons to ad- dress the children, which he did commencing, My dear young friends, mutability is stamp ed on all sublunary objects" The children were not prepared to deny the accuracy of the statement. A man of tact always manages to get out of >1. | business was to-read the first lesson" came across the chapter in Daniel in which the names Shadrach Meshach and Abednego occur twelve | times, and finding it extremely difficult to pronounce these names he went through the chapter referring to them as @the aforesaid gentlemen" ZA4& *fAE E X ~(1A . A stranger from Brenham. Texas, whs was helping Galveston out in the Mardi Gras busi | ness, took his watch to watchmaker to have | it repaired. After a few minutes work the l watchmaker handed it back with the remark I that the damages were $2. What was, the | matter with it ?" asked the stranger There was hair in it.. .'Was that all You ought 1 to have found hair mattress in it for $2." True merit will always be recognized. A circus manager recently went fishing in acer- | tain brook and found out that there wasn't a IL. young man declare that he had just caught 291 trout from that brook in three hours And | the circus owner at once saw the worth of the
 lad and hired him at $40 week to write bills advertising the circus. : 21 When the plate was passed round he drew from his breast coat-pocket large roll of bills and conspicuously fumbling them over extract ed fve-dollar note and tossed it into the I.1z | served the little incident, whereupon one of them whispered: ''He must be a successful stock broker" ''No," returned the other. Che drives an ash cart in the employ of the police department"
 "VelI, not much don't comblain no more of desc wbat you call lem hoodlems," said poor German apothecary the other day. 'Vunce maig comblaint to the court of some hoodlems who had no business maigin fuss boud my blaze. vos der vidness; yes. And mine Gott der man who served der paber sn me to be vIdness vos der worst hoodems of der whole lot. coss knewed him. Vod kint off justis would I get init arrangements likes dot ?"
 "Do you love me, sweet ?" was the wall heswole,
 As he pressed her close to his hearts wild throb- ping;
 .Does lovss fierce tide irrgate your soul?
 Is your heart with mine sim taneous bobbing ?" Her soulful eyes flew up to his face, - s-
 And pierced his with lovely glitter: Then soft she murmured with winning grace "Do love you, George well, should twtter"
 youth was heard to remark to jolly and fat Teutonian, as the circus pageant passed the city hall this morning: Haven't seen you before? You: face looks familiar /" "Is dot so ?" said Hans. "When you get SO old as me your face will look familiar, too" and stroll