Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1881-03-17
\ STRANGE LAND.

to get ahead The office grew daily
more unbearable, and | sighed for q
change, cursed my poverty and all the
deprivations to which it subjected me
''Work. work, work. 1 said to my
self, "year in and year out, to keer
body and soul together, and when un-
able to work longer, then die. Such is
life"
! [ had unused for some time over my
hard fate, when | gradually became
aware that a sweet feeling of calm and
repose was stealing over my drowsy
senses. | could not account for it in
any way as | had not even taken one
glass of liquor the whole day long.
'Oh" | murmured, II am happy, if
it could always be like this, no work
forever. Oh! for land where work is
never heard Of How quick [ would
! fly there. Oh! everlasting bliss"
Suddenly the room seemed to grow
brighter, AM, looking up saw figure
robed in white and with snowy wings
standing near me. The face of the
figure was one of exquisite loneliness
and perfect calm [ was not frighten.
ed. The beautiful mild look upon the
countenance of the figure gave me nc
cause for alarm, so [ said:
"Who are your"
"a spirit" answered the figure.
''Apple-jack or Rye?"
Rash mortal, beware" said the
spirit, with a frOwn.
''Well, what do you mean by COM
ing around here on winters night
with only a night-gown on. Why don't
you buy an ulster?"
Cool! vain fool" said the spirit. II
come to aid thee and thou dOst mock
me; art thou aware that [ know all
things?'
us that SOP [ replied. Where's the
cat?"
The spirit only frowned, and 50
said:
''When will Tammany disband?"
No answer came from the spirit, but
fancied / saw him wink his left optic.
"DO you know who wrote the 'MOrev
letter."
Imagined the spirit grew nervous,
so | said:
Being as you are from the other
world, and no doubt pretty we'll posted
on the affairs of your own country,
will you please tell me the probabilities
Of jim Bennett ever wearing a white
robe and banging tin harp at a
celestial picnic?'
The spirit gave a frightful groan, and
| thought [ would no longer converse
on personal matters.
''Well, who are you anyhow ask
cd Arc Ioloro+p IN Il
from the committee of one hundred
hunting up recruits for the party?"
crash mortalp' said the spirit; 81
was flying through the air and heard
thy complaints against toll. If thou
art weary come with me and rest"
"Well, you're brick, after ALL" |
replied. "Put it there; and ifyou will
take seat for few moments | will
rush the growler."
The spirit looked atme in melan-
choly way rs if it did not understand.
Have cigar then as you don't
drinkw
Foolish mortal, come with me if
thou wouldst toll no more" said the
spirit in deep voice.
Pm your OYSTER" [ replied
De IL so, SA1Q the spirit.
The spirit waved its hands over me
and in an instant all grew dark. |
heard Il loud buzzing in my head and
felt myself carried through the air at a
terrific rate of speed. At last [ felt
myselfset gently down and heard the
spirit say:
''LoOk"
opened my eyes and looked.
shall never forget the sight. [ was in
beautiful country; the air was balmy
and perfumed; the most charming and
exquisite flowers and trees grew in
great pIOfusion and endless variety as
far as the eye could reach. Rare birds
of varigated and and brilliant plumage
flew from tree to tree, singing in
melodlou8 harmony; brooks of pure
water which reflected all the hues OF
the rainbow, babbled and laughed be-
meath the trees. A peaceful calm pre-
vailed and a feeling of infinite rest
stole over ME as | yiewd the beauties
of the landscape before me.
Where, oh where am I?' [ asked
the spirit by my side.
This" said the spirit, "this is the
land where no man works"
For Heavens sake" l said, "don't
let Abe Hewitt know it, or he will be
here with Thompson, Cooper and lot
of heelers, and commence to reOrgan-
lie the country in twenty-four hours
after they arrive"
The spirit smiled.
mo man enters here without my
aid, he said.
"Ah" l exclaimed, "you are perhaps
Chairspirit of the committee on Organ
ization. Do they ever try to work the
Doodle racket on your"
rash mortal, cease thy mockeryr'
said the spirit.
4 assure You, my dear spirit, that
Messrs. Foster, Goodwin, Helbig and
Haffen did not think it was mockery."
Il know not of what thou speaketh.
| heard thy complaints against thy
daily toll and came to thy aid. Here
IN this place no man works. Go forth
and enjoy myself"
But | don't see what Pm to eat" I
said.
Fruit" said the spirit.
Great graft" I replied.
WHAT" Numbered the spirit.
Il remarked that / supposed that
there must be great graft to have such
fine fruit" l answered.
"Farewell!'' said the spirit, and he
in the air.
Well" | said to myself, Give struck
a picnic at last. No more toll, nothing
to do but eat and sleep. No more Of
flee work for me-"
| Went over to one of the trees and
Off an apple and ate it. 1t tasted good