The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-04-26


Aud Of the pleasant sunshine
Please kindly give us some.
Uf mud, and siush. and seet,
Let what we've had suffice.
Please send the sunshine,
And then we'll think you nice.
Derrick
-Tnplsts are nursed in suck SESSION.. Y.
News.
-FiIkins says that while he might reasonably
entertain a doubt, he wouldn't keep q tramp
over sight.- n. !. News.
Fans are larger than evsr, aud 1t takes .
long t'ms to ra'.e the wind to purchsss one Of
them.-Loweli Citissn.
my wife, remarked Fitsnoodle, els fairly
crazy over the spring fashions. She's got the
dsiirium trimmings. -Nycum Advertiser.
THAT put . different face ON IT," said the
sWindier when he raised Q cheek from So TO
$oS.-Meriden Reco rider.
Tho moon dogs which recently frightened far
western people 50 much, we're probably sky
tefriers.-Somsryile Journal.
The ne~ert sweet things 10 wrApe-ths
tsty.-J.ast words Of q dying billiard player
''Oh. carom me out."-LoweiI Citizen.
The Danish name for farce IS TAX" and
when a new farce brought oct the Danish
crities never ''sst down" Gu 1.-THE Score.
Kind words are bsid-headed. They can
nev-r d,e.-The father OF the family keeping
lent will dine down TOWN.. % P,cayuns.
-Jooes, Who goes 10 the "lods." quite often,
says Mrs. J. could give the Nihiinst- several
points On blowing uP.-Boston Transcript.
Hog ra;sers believe the "P-n'' is Fighter
than the .sword, and yet they adopts y.
Sencips-.a their s,ock-S. Y. News.
-"This 10 very like a whale" as the school
boy said when he received merited ca.tigation
from the tescher.-30mervie Journal
a western paper reports the birth Of male
child with wings. Prohstly nature in;esded him
for n hank casher.-Phi.adelphIa Chronicle.
Why is green psrsimmon like . glri's lips
when she bids her lover goodby at the gate
Because they both pucker. Wheeling Journal.
1t is peculiar no. sound man sleeps "hsa
his wife crasis over him on her way 20 the
kitchen 10 make . hre.-jprInsfsld fO-) News.
The exchange fend is toned
to wade into an editors office and sow the seeds
OF evil and wicked thaaghts.-Breakfast Table.
The late husband catches the lecture. A
telegraph line - worth its wait In Gould. The
popular figure the German Is the female
hYure.-Loweli CItizea.
Many girls would rather wear their stockings
with hsies in than nave them dsrued, because |
when dared they are msnded. and girls pre.er
linen aiIvs.-Meriden Recorder. |
As the maiden inclined is the youth bens
Its easy enough after Won get your hand |
letters his wrIst.-Meriien Recorder.
Put boys st work aud see how they'll plsy. |
Set Thorn AZ play and s@e how they'll Work.--
The successfu chropodisi ~ always in . come
attcss state-Syacuse Sunday Times.
"A womas in Iowa called Utz is gradually
turning to bone. Without going to Iowa. there are \
many people who are forever trying 10 bvne Uiz
Boston Transcript.
-When PhAdelphians man with a black |
eye. flooded nose. and generally iarruped APP
pesranc-, they point 10 hun and whisper, Hes
= etstssraxn."-Boston Post.
The material OF which the white house is
built 10 freestone; and when An applicant for
once ~ refused by the pre- -ideus he thinks that
10 freeze tone aso.-cincinnAu Saturday Night.
The only thing / regret" sad friend to
SPAWN. 81. the past!' lyon should no, set that
worry you." said spawn ..Why ." he ~as asked.
Thafs Al l,sSd i.,.v /
Pha Sun.
Many have to do their scratching with. |
out tn aid Of their itch reia,ivss.-when hens
get IN your garden 10 Is safe to shoot 'e,n the
spot--Young man, take . wife, for 10 the
spriag tie EN- OF iife.-Wnitehali Times.
What are We coming to ?" mournfully queries
. wertern editor. We do not know; but We are
sure you will not forget go 70 "the same old
place." provided there ~ any OF that ".good old
stun" lett No. thank you; we do not drink
PhIiadsp hia Item.
The recent marriage OF two gentlemen from |
Detroit, Mich., ct LISBON, Portugal. with Young
thiugs. What more appropriate than that Mich
lgAnders should thus uaite their fortunes with Z
Standard
When . surprise party intends to raid on a Z
happy home, the host and hostess, an common t,
politeuess. should awsys bs warned. They can |
have previous engagement At the theatsr.-N.
U. P;csyune. !.
lit il reported that a Greenwood (Xansas)
second Advent preacher who declares that ..fhe {
world will come to end IN 1881" has provided |
sgsin.t "a error in his mathematics by taking
sote for five years loan Of u ,0o, for which +
he demanded II per cent. interest.
WHAT'S one mans meat 10 another mans
richiaosis. Barnum, the Snowman, attributes 4
AS success TO printer's ink while Barnum, the
chairman. charges his defeat same J
Herald
A man in New York has bsen arrested for
,tnsg Oh ani swallowing womsn's car. II the
lea OF insanity ia put IA he will probably M ,
,eid ear respo seIbie.-Rona Sentinel. Ha should
I least he bound over to keep the piece 8
iawcob Strauss.
A Phaisiph,a society il wrestling with the 9
uestiou. ''Whsn mta has his ,ie insured for =,
lo0,@O Is his wife Justified in refusing 10 pre-
'ars mustard plaster for HIM when he 10 {
e,zed with q sudden and attack Of the ,
ramps!"
A stock broker. returning to his ONCE the
Their day after n substantial lunch with his /,
i,ent. compia"cntiy said TO has head clerk
Mr.. Patkin. the world looks different to man =
Then he has bottle of champagne IN him."
Yes. cir" replied the clerk significantly, land
'e looks different to the werid."-Puck.