The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1881-12-27
spoopendyke's Baby.

Cant you stop this fuss 2"
" Hush -h-hi' cooed Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, dandling the infant "Dout ky,
Dada 'ants to s'eep. Baby's all be
dood."
Mr.. Spoopendyke eyed the proceeding
cynically for moment and then the
baby burst out again.
g Dry up ~ shouted Mr. Spoopendyke.
"There's nothing the matter with you.
Why don't you go to sleep like Chris
tlan p''
"There, there, therel'' cooed Mrs.
Spoopendyke "Sbe's dess too tweet for
anyslng. Poor little drl Now, go to
seep ike little dear 10
Whereat the baby howled more dis
mally.
Cant you give her something 7"
demanded Mr.. Spoopendyke. "Can't
you dose her. S'pose I'm going to lay
awake all night for the fun of appreciat-
ing that Pm the head of the family?
Here, let me take her, I'll fix her.
and Mr.. Spoopendyke grabbed his off
spring and began to pace the floor with
her.
&C BE careful of her, and Ill heat some
water, and try little pepperment and
sugar." said Mrs. Spoopendyke, as she
promptly raked out battered tin cup,
well blacked around the bottomed and
sides which she promptly converted into
boiler.
"A baby never cries unless there's
pin sticking in her." argued Mr.. Spoop-
endyke as he held the infant across his
arm and began to undo her night dress,
What's this thing you've got wrapped
around her 2"
"That's her "belly band, " don't touch
it,"squeaked Mrs. Spoopendyke, waving
the cup foot from the gas jet in her
trepidation.
"Ohl 1 see," retoIted Mr.. Spoopendyke
fishing out the pins," What's that other
thing here, the $ britchingp" Hold on,
Cleopatral' he continued as the bawling
young one made spring, "don't make
the mistake of trying to fool with Spoop-
endyke," and the fond father groped
around for the cause of the disturbance.
''Since you've got the rest of the harness
on, p'raps you'd better drive this baby
with martingales. And I'll tell you one
thing, Mrs. Spoopendyke, this baby's
clothes amt more'n half aired. No won
der she howls. Cutchee, cutchee, cutch-
ee; dod gast the thing Say, what do you
call this rifle barrel business? What's
this breastpin doing here under her
chest ?''
'Good gracious, that's a safety pin
Let it alonel'' said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke.
whats the combination of this rack
ct anyhow ?' demanded Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, tugging at the pin. Who solder
ed this thing on? What's it forp Give
me the combination ~ and he jerked it
loose with results he had scarcely con-
templated, for it left the baby stitchless.
The startled young one shivered and was
quiet for moment. "Told you so,''
said Mr.. Spoopendyke, with an air of
triumph. 1t only needs q little COM
mon sense to take care of a baby"
But at that instant the infant tuned
up again with redoubled vigor.
Let me take her." pleaded Mrs.
Spoopendyke she'll freeze to death ~
'Let her freeze!" roared Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke. IF this measley baby is going to.
have her own way about bowling, she's
going to have it about freezing. Cutchee
cutchee, cutchee Dry up, will you ?"
and Mr.. Spoopendyke set his teeth and
pranced around, all of which extracted
the most frightful row from his in FAINT.
She wants medicine, and I've got it
ready for her." said Mrs Spoopendyke,
leone to mamma, now, what little
dearl Come to mamma and be comfort
ed" and as she took the child the cries
diedaway into sobs and were buried in
snifs.
6 knew could quiet her," said Mr..
Spoopendyke, as he watched the baby.
You don't know anything about chill
dren, or you never would have put that
tin anchor in her clothes. That was
what allied her."
"It wasn't either" snapped Mrs.
Spoopendyke. She's got the collie,
little dearl and you almost killed her.
Anyway, she stopped her howling,n
retorted Mr.. Spoopendyke, "and she
howled because You wanted her to stand
in the shafts all night. Another time
you'll know enough to unhitch the
young one before you put her in the
STALL" Mrs. Spoopendyke made no re-
sponse, but ladled in peppermint qnali-
fled with little warm water and sugar
MI