davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

furniture conIiitiny 81 bed and
stool fixed Is the val, and Q
washing apparatus, There are also IN cleo
tric bel. cupboard, O closet, and glar
burner placed above Q small table The
prisoner can, Il theyplease, read Or write
all night long, ON the ground floor are 70
cells for prisoners accused Of murder, or
known to belong 70 the criminal class, and
in these there Is plank bed, There are
half dozen cells under ground for pTis-
oners who are guilty Of breaches Of discip-
line, and in the infrmary wing there are
nine rooms for prisoners OF good position
in society should any ever come there
which are furnished with some approach to
luxury. There are also two or three suites
OF apartments reserved for persons who are
awaiting trial for political otfenses, and
who's are to be allowed TO furnish them
according TO their own taste. The kitchens,
baths, and heating apparatus are oil on
the area floor, and the interior OF the build
ing, which is Of iron, Is so constructed as
to form large hall in the centre, which
reaches right up to the roof. There is a
telephone between the prison and the
AssIze Court, so that prisoners can be sent
there without having to wait, The prison
ior women contains seventy single cellsand
fifteen large dormitories, there being ac-
commodation for 22O women altogether,
The dormitories are partitioned oil, SO that
each occupant can be placed under lock
and key for the night; and there are three
or four large workroOms in which they will
be employed in day time, under the sur
VIGILANCE OF female wardens As in the
mems prison, there is spacious exercise
ground and asepaIate chapel.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28


a gcRREsPoSpE Who witnessed the De-
paItpFe q the lase PFelidents mother rom
solda for Cleveland sayg Themost touch
ing incident since the great tragedy oc-
CURED this morning. AS Grandma Gar
field was packing her little bag, previous to
her departure, the clasp refused to yield to
her trembling touch. Involuntary she
exclaimed: Games, can't unfasten my
satChel!" Then the awful truth dawned
upon her afresh, made more cruel by the
involuntary exclamation. "What did l
say?n she gasped, looking quickly about to
see il her itterance had been heard. Mrs,
Larabee turned her head the other way
as ii she had been pierced by IN arrow
Mrs. Garfield stood trembling with uncon-
trollable agitation, her breast heaving with
emotion she would fain repress, and her
eyes trimming with tears, Mr.. Palmer,
she said at length, controlling herself by .
mighty effort, "you are the only James l
have now. Win you uniasten III" The
incident is especially touching, showing as
it does the dependence Of the mother and
the customary courtesy Of the son,
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

GEORGE WASHINGTON, the first President
Of the United States, died at his home,
Mount Vernon, on the 18th Of December,
100, aud WIS there buried. John Adams,
the second, and Thomas Jefferson, the
third President, both died on the 4th Of
July. 1896 Adams was buried beneath
the Unitarian Church at Quincy, and JET
ierson was buried nj Monticello, his Vir-
GINA nome. Madison died June %, 1896,
and WIS buried ut Montpelier, his home
OH the Virginia Mountains. Monroe died
ON the 4th Of July 1881, at the residence
of his son-in.law in New York, and he was
first buried in the Marble. Cemetery Of
That city, but was finally. buried In
Hollywood Cemetery, Richmond, Va
John Quincy :, Adams died in
the Capital February 81, 1878,
and was buried by the side Of his
father at Quincy. Jackson died June s,
lS45, and was buried at the Hermitage,
which had long been his home. Van Buren,
died July q, 1862, and was buried at Kin
derlook, his home. Harrison died April
!, 1871, and was buried at North Bend.
Tyler died January II, 1862. and was buried
IN Hollywood Cemetery, Richmond. Polk
died June ID, 1910, md was buried in the
lawn Of his own home In Nashville. Taylor
died July ., 1850, and was buried in Cave
Hill Cemetery, Louisville. Fillmore
died March s, 1874, and was bur.
led in Forest Lawn Cemetery, near
Buffalo. Pierce died October s, 1869, ind
was buried in Minot Cemetery, Concord.
Buchanan died January !, 1868, and was
buried in Woodland Hill Cemetery, Lam.
custer l.incolndied April 10, 1866, md was
buried in Oakridge Cemetery, Springfield.
johnson died July3l, 1875, md was buried
at Grcenville. Garfield died September 10,
1881, and was buried Monday in CIeye.
land. -Four Presidents died In oilce-IIar.
rison and Taylor by illness, and Line IN
and Garfield by assassination. Only two
ex.Presidents are now living--Gnnt and
Hayes, and three cx-Vice Presidents are
yet living-lIamlln, Colfax and Wheeler.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28
rleetrlelly Applied 10 Ilalloon..

London Times
On Saturday last the Balloon Society
inaugdrated their winter session by IL
meeting at Lille Bridge, West Brompton.
An address was given by tic President,
Mn w. II. 10 Feyre, Q. f., on m electrical
stationary balloon invented by NJ. Jules
GODDARD and NJ. dc Fonyiellc. A new
application Of electricity WIS about to be
made, which, IL was true, did not en-.
able one to pfopela balloon, but by which
the system Of aerial navigation would bc
considerably improved. The first step TO
be taken Iii making II balloon stationary
was Il. prevent u gyrating. NM. GOdattl
and de Ponyille lad overcome this by
means Of q disk somewhat similar to the
face Of the compass placed In the centre Of
the car poised OH vertical axis. When
one side Of the cur was lower than the
other the disk OF the plate beCame instant.
IN affected. An electric current was in.
simultaneously transmitted to u inngnetized
point Immediately opposite, which lad II
contrary effect, and placed the Car In rQui.
libum. The Plahte-fatire battery which
produced the electric current would At the
same time act on small shaft running at
the bottom Of the car and turn Il small
screw The balloon would thus neither
ascend nor descend. The principle had
been carried out successfully and praCtiC.
ally recently on a small scale, and he be.
lieved would come into general use in a
very short time. He considered that this
WIS the most extraordinary discovery IN
connection with the storage Of electricity
that had ever been made. The result
would be that the law Of gravitation would
be overcome, and that we should he able TO
suspend dOdy in the air at any altitude
and III any position.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

A LONDON letter says: Mr.. and Mrs.
Hayes are to be with It's in October us the
guests OF Mr.. rulcstOn, NJ. =. Whit
picturesque residence they will have, TO be
surcI Mr.. puleston has been so fortunate
MS TO secure ono Of those charming houses
in Deans Yard, Westminster, which are
almost never vncant, thelGasesof which are
Il matter Of treaty beforehand for years be.
tween families Of distinction. Not in all
London elsewhere is there u locality at
once so central, so retired, and yet so sane.
titled, Ns tint upon which stands these few
comfortable residences, forming part and
parcel OF the grand bulk Of Westminster
Abbey and tho houses OF Parliament, as
YOU see the imposing mass when driving
southwark FROM 1'mfalgar square down
Parliament street. II was only yesterday
took advantage Of leisure hour TO rcread
Washington lrying's exquisite sketch Of
Westminster Abbey. Mr.. and Mrs. Hayes
will do well also to refresh In their minds.
by its petusal the history and wondrotis
associations Of the grUat fame near which
they are about to establish their Temporary
home,
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28
How They salt a Claim.

Laramie ihpMeHhs'
~ wish you would explain to me all
about this salting Of claims that hear so
much about" said u meek-eyed tenderfoot
10 u grizzly old miner who was panning
out six ounces of pulverized quartz, 81
don't see what they want TO salt claim
for, and don't understand how they do
it."
"Well, YOU see, hot season like this
they have to salt n claim to keep i. A
fresh claim is good enough for n fresh ten
dcrfOot, bat 0lGl-timen won't look at any
thing but II picked claim, You know
what quartz is, probably2
"NON
"Well every claim has quartz, Some
more and some less. You find out how
many quartz there IL, and then put in so
many pounds of suit to the quart, Wild
cat claims require more suit, because the
wild cat spells quicker than anything else.
Sometimes you catch u sucker, too, and
YOU have to put him in brinopretty plenty
or YOU will loss him. That's one reason
why they salt u claim. Then, again, you
often grub stake man"
"But WlllI X u Sruu sUlkeG
swell, u grub-stake il stake that the
boys hang their grub on so they can carry
it. Lots Of mining men have been knock
cd cold by blow from agrub.stake. What
wanted to say, though, was this: You
will probably ut first strike free milling
property, with indications Of something
else. Then you will no doubt sink till you
strike bedrock, or II true iisurc gopher
hole with traces Of disappointment,
That's the time to put in your suit. You
can shoot it into the shaft with u double,
barrcled shotgun, or wet II and npply II
with whitewash brush. II people turn
up their noses ut your claim then, and say
It is n snide, and that there Is something
rotten in Denmark, you can tell them that
they are clear OIL, and that you know it Is
all right"
The last seen OF the tcnder.ioot, he was
buying dOublo-barreled shotgun and ten
pounds Of rock sRlt.
There's no doubt but mining camp Is
the place to send u young man who wants
to acquire knowledge and I'LL his system
full Of information that will be useful to
him so long us hc lives.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28
rtc 1.ntrest i,rlaon IN gnrone.

Prom the London st. Jamea'a Gazette.
The House Of Detention which las just
been uponedin Berlin, and to which all
iiheptisoners, male and female, who are
awaiting their trial have been removed, is
tbelNtgest prison in Europe. There are
rs different buildings, the mems prison
belhe four stories high with 7s2 single
eells several large rooms, holding in all
lui prisoners, 10 rooms for the wartlens
and Sleeping Accommodations for llS other
employee Each Of the cells has a window
len iset high and an afched tcOi, the
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

NEW YoRR city is truly metropolitan in
its charity. It's citizens have subscribed
already nearly $4,000 for the relief Of the
sufferers by Michigan fires, and over $3.50,
OlO for the Mrs, Garfield fund. New York
knows neither section, State, boundaries
creeds nor countries where charity is to
he dispensed. It Is enough that there are
suffering people; then relief follows,
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

] know Hop lItters will bear recommrnda.
ton honestly. All who use them confer mn
on them the highest encOniums, and rive
them credit for making Ctires--all the pto.
nrietOrs claim for them. have kent them
since they were first offered to the pubitr
They took high rank from the first, and
maintained II, and are more called for tiIon
all others combined. SO long as thew keen
UP their high reputation for purity and tise.
fitness, shall continue TO recommend THEM
something have never done before wifi
any other patent medicine,
NwAw j. ]. BABCOCK, NJ D.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

PnEslpESr GARFIELD died with no clergy
man at his bedside, His pastor was in
Washington, and in the sudden coming OF
death there was NO time to call in clergy
man. Nor was any needed, 1t is the great
principle Of the faith General Garfield pro-
fessed and in which he died, that nohuman
mediation ayails when the soul is face to
fnne with It's Maker,
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28
Miiihite.

1osr CREEk, Harrison County, W. Va.
Tho citizens Of this place and surrounding
country are anxious for some man or com.
pany with capital 10 come and build first.
class FinURiSO Mill Coal and water In
abundance. SitualeOn the line Of the G., w.
Il q. Il, Il For information correspond with
or come and see John A. Sheets OF Daniel
Basscll, Lost Greek Station, Harrison county,
w Va
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

Ex-PnEs1DRNT HAYES has q farm near
Bismarck, Dakota, which he obtained at
from sixty to seventy-fye cents an acre. 1t
is now worth sl5 an acre, and it is so rich
TINT Mr.. Hayes reaped from his five hun
drcd acres Of wheat last year profit OF
sl5OCO.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

BOARDING, WIFE ROOM, FOR TWO
D OF throa gllfiemen Also tahla hoafd y the
day q weak inquire q 10 81 slxfrenth gteeh
cofnef Eofi and SlIteenth. se9ls
II OsT-BETWEEN THE NATIONAL
IL Bank Of West Virginia and the B 9, pepot,
pair Eye Glasses With eaae and ltFing ettaeheu.
The finder VIII confer Z favor on the owner by
leaving II this office
ToR SALE-PRoPERTY, alag MAIN
IL Street, lot gaxl9O on which Is erected y two,
INTO double dwelling, or store room and dwelling
located where property Is In demand, aud advanc-
Ing IN price. Applyto -. .,,r,,,,, ,c,,r
Real EatRte Agent and Broker, 1915 Market street,
CAnRles Block SeS
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28
DIED.

APLIS.-on Tuesday, September a. lsSl, ut z
O'clock A, NJ. VipIA, daughter ot George W, and
Sarah X. AplIn, aged 7yean and iOmonths'
Funeral from her parents residence, In ClarE's
Addition, Martins Ferry, Ohio this morning ut
O'Clock. Friends OF the family are invited to at
tend. Interment at Walnut Grove Cemetery.
BIRCH.-On Tuesday evening September %;
1851 At O'Clock, GEORGE BIRCH, aged 10 years aud
months
Funeral notice hereafter
McCLUNEY.-on Monday evening, September
2G, 1881, CARoLlSI H., wife u James McCluney
Funeral services at 10 O'Clock Thursday morning
Ininrmnnt nriynic.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

PrREtY vegetable; perfectly safe; a good
snbst tu.e for castor oil pleasant 10 take; Ger.
tain In effect, can lie truly said Of Denig's
Worm syrup Try III your druggist has II,
% cent? q bottle
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28
ATTORNEYS,

F., n"i"' ATToRSEY 81 t ,SS ico.a fcss
No. 1901 Chnpllne st., opposite '"V w. 10
Wheeling, W Va -..----a--
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

NlpNEspAY aoRAINo. SET. g.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1881-09-28

Or NJ. A. DAUPiiiN, '' ''"'
M. az broadway, New York
MI ntf Gnllid Extraordinary drawings "A Under
the supervision mud management Of GENERA II a.
r. BEA UllEGARD and JUBAL a, EARLEY.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
k,'I'itz -Jahrcke.
Pat. for La
ScsaiiiinHez. Artificial Stone
Pavement,
DEALER

North Rirer an,i German Fi0as
Curb iNtCne daG P.rtiand Ctnsent.
Nos. 4oS a.d 2io DELOnD STREET,
Between Earnnne and Caronde!ct Streets
dec 2o-Iy. .Tesv Orleans.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
Mothers! Mothers!
NGtheYs!.!

Are you disturbed at night ond
broken of yoar rest hy Il sick
child suffering and crying with
the excruciating pain Of cutting
teeia +! 1t so, go at once anh get
Il bottle of MRS. WINSLOW,S
SOOTHING SYRUP. 1t will
relieve the poor little sufferer i'm
nediately-derend upon it; there
is no mistake about it. There ia
not 4 mother on earth who has
eyes used it, who will not tell
you at once that it will regulate
the bowels, and give rest to the
mother, aud relief and health "a
the child, operating like magic.
1t is perfectly safe to use in al,
eases, and pleasant to the taste
and is the prescription Of one oi
the Oldest and best female phys;
Clans and nurses in the United
States. Sold every where. %
cents a bottle.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
Il Coug gh, Cold or Sore


Enroa5 Sbou.u tm stopped. Neg
i,c i'euH-ntl, results in an In.
o"rddle LamJ Disease or Consuo,p
ts"A EAO WNS BkCNIHIt;.
HOtHL', dc certain to gice r.
HG ia 1sihma, Bronchitis. Conals
t"to'rh, ConSumptioa and Throat
Diseases. For thnry years the
Ir"cheS have been recommended
~ physicians, and always give
i"iirct satisfaction. They are lot
new OF IN lied, bn. having been
tested by wld. ANA constant nse
iM nearly an en,ile generation.
they hanr attained Well melited
Tank an"rg the few staple temed
les OF the age. Public speakers and
Smgcrs use them to clear and
strengthen the Voice. Sold at
twenty tive cents a box every
where.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
For Sale.

One double hued boiler ~ inches = Of
ieet, with one stealu drum attached "a
Inches by feet. Stand pipe. check yalye.
safety waive, hlow off valve. whistle valve
one bfi'ch'hg and one furnace mouth.
", II. aboNe boiler was made by John
Ward ot New Orleans, and. has t:,han ~
tour clcps only.
For terins Ne. apply to !. j. Shaffer Map-
hoiia finntatlea, Terrebonne Parish, La.
Sept. 2Utli. 1885, ,,,,
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
For Sale.

The Citizens Bank of Louisiana ia naw
prepared 70 give clear tues to its lands
any itaats 'oi safe tue opicer Jones place
"aieiio e. situated near ih,iud,uxv,,in i,
IN p;ti lsi o, Assumption, containing a13,,
acles. or Whieh oip are in cultivation. Thcra
Is /" small yelling and good sn ar house.
ana apparatus open kettle snsar in work
~ "'der ".' iao place with tarniing i,nple,
heht9 ant Mnics. Apply to Citisena
BaHk in New Orleans.
Ars Orleans. 3rd January 1851.
JAS. J. TARLETON.
Cashier
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
STATE tsF LOUISIANA,

Parish Conrt now 10Th. Iudieial District
our, pagish oi i.af,urcEe.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
ALL lyaDDKSE. TT.

The Recorder, Americas, Ca,
says: "Clerks, Senators, .Kepra>
se''iativrs, Doctors, Lawyers, CiIi
z-ns, 10 l'nb'ir and private life,
are tes'i'sin- 10y the tbonsandrr
AM over their own sIgnatnrc4s
th"tsa remedy has been found foe
brigh;'> disease Of the Kidneye
and for Diabetes; these are I'd
spectlveiy known IA Warmers
Safe k;cney aud liver Cure and
Warmers Safe Diabetes Care"
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05

s4s1 n Yourselves by making mon
IN = "a ey when a golden chance is
as Offered. thereby always keep
MI Ell ing poverty from yonr door.
HH iAIH Those who ALWAYS take ad
vantage Of the good chances
for making money that are offered. general
" become wealthy. while those who do not
improve such chances remain in poverty.
We want men. women. boys and girls TO
work for us right in their own localities.
The business will pay more than ten times
ordinary wages. We furnish an expensive
outii. and all that you need, free. No one
who engages fails to make money very zap
idly. You can devote your whole tire to
| the work. or only your spare moments.
Full information and all that is needed
sent free. Address STINSON e. CO.. Port
land, Maine.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
VICk'S.
Illustrated Floral Guide

aW sSel is an Elegant Book Of l-o Pages
49,. - Sotored Hover Plate, and coo Illus
Ssslofs, with Descriptions of the best
I Nefs AHa Vegetables, AID Directions iof
sNslk. Only 10 eeals. In Ensiieh az
II yeu afterwards order ses"e
sassi -iie ID etats.
sAhS sEEuS agsthe hest in the world
LoRAl GUIDE will seiI bow to get ana
9ov fhen.
s'eAs lever and Vegetable Garden. LA
+ CeiOrcd Plates, 40 lngrav'nss'
a. u y csnte in paper covers ST. ~ IN eis~
Il r.. eioth- In German or English .e
saso Illustrated Monthly Magszint--a-
80 Ees. Luiored Pate In every nEmnel
ssfy 1ina Engla>ings. Price Si:so g
ave Copies lcfeto.50. Specimen Nau
q stsat ior IL cents; Strial copies tor =
aasesA, JAMES WICK, Rochester. y. !
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05
snow THis TO YOUR GROCER.

, -. Crtnt -e!i. free tn .hnSc who wisi,
~ t. ,.t..a.t in the most p!e.ssart and
I r. rrn.it thte business raoWn. Every
q { 1I.iu. new t'amtal not required. NJ"
IL ~ VIII furnish you everything So ii
= - ,,ava ami ut,war.is ia easily made
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05

IS. T. Grisam9re has Tor s..A
cart, wagon and carriage sposes,
and feI!oes, piow handles. pIO.
oeains. plows, wheel oaErOws, and
plow shares.
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05

Henry G. Miller vs No. Sn6 John s. B;llia
The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1881-02-05

Ill You want TO buy q good
stove, 90 to &. T. Giisamore's
Stove DepOt.
The semi-weekly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1879-1882, 1881-10-06

erment handsome y in duties, besides
yielding fair moicty to the officers.
The largest seizure of cigars was made
by Charles Kane, who was on duty in
Brooklyn when he secured $4,000
cigars of the well-known brands of
Upmann, Espanola and such grades.
On another occasion he saw that extra
caution was being observed in ranking
some sugar barrels off the brig John
Griffin, and be set watch. After
the cargo was all off he made seizure
of nine barrels and had them conveyed
to the seizure room. Here an exam
ination showed that each sugar barrel
was zinc-lined and full of choice cigars
The result of this haul was $4,000
choice Havanas. On another occasion
he found large consignment of cigars
in -four barrels, which were inclosed
in oil barrels and lying on the Alex
andre dock -NeU York Star.
The semi-weekly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1879-1882, 1881-10-06

the skin of raw-hide, attribute it to
wisdom-not wife.
An editor never steals He always
gives full credit, and he don't write
Sex" after an article. There are a
number of brainless scalawags in the
professio who pass for editors
and who steal, but they don't have
the pure ring
When you shake hands with an ed
itor don't squeeze his fugers too hard,
for they may be covered with valuable
diamond rings
When you owe an editor dollar
don't pay him for the shock might be
too great for his nervous system.
When you visit an Office mix the
editors exchanges: he has plenty Of
time to straighten them. Steal them
if you want to; be will not need them.
Besides it is fashionable.
If you are mean man don't mex
tion the name of an advertising agent
to an editor, FOR it will fill bis soul
with delight and cause him to smile.
And when an editor smiles the bark
peels off and the air turns blue.