Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1881-01-27
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A Bosk Agen, Tackles Boarding.
house Keeper.
Yesterday morning man with the
aspect Of a book agent walked swift
ly up Magazine street until he came
opposite q house where red-headed
W man with long nose and her
sleeves rolled up was washing the
windows.
Is thisa boarding house, MADAME"
he said. gently, as he lea ed his ell
B, SIS on the fence and looked over in
tie yard.
Yes, sir, replied the woman.
"Can l obtain desirable board here
at a reasonable rate?"
Yes. sir; there is 10 better house
in the city,
Gan l see the landlady?"
q am the lady, sir.
"Ah! indeed. I have often heard
of the beauty and industry of the
women Of New Orleans, but now l
have an ocula: demonstration OF the
fact.
Do you wish TO secure board
hsre?' inquired the woman, blushing
and looking pleased.
well, l reckon l do. Have you
any old maids in the house who wear
gimlst curls and have pet parrots that
talk all night ani worry the life ont
of people? Are there any babies
hers who are always having the collie
and bowling enough to make a-man
crazy? Madam, l an very particu-
lar where l board, as the last place l
Stopped at my room was situated De-
tween that Of young woman who
had pair Of twin babies and mu-
sician Sho played On the flute and
W .lked with a crutch, and when the
babes became quiet on one side the
i,ft,nal cuss on the other would either
be humping over the floor or play
ing on the flute, until at laat | could
stand it no longer. Are any Of these
boarding. house pests stopping with
yoa?"
"No, sir; none but quiet single
men board here"
"Ah. that is surely fine recon-
mendaticn, but do you get fine ts-
ble?"
eyes, of course do replied the
woman. getting angry, "what else do
You want to know?"
"What prompted me to ask you the
question was thefact that every board.
ing.house falls ipto the error Of CIV
ing its boarders tough liver for break
fast, which is something l detest,
When man gets up in the morning
he doesn't feel like trying to eat a
spring mattress, consequently | made
it q point to hunt up house where
che boarders are not so cursed. A man
sfcaa stand cod fish balls very well,
bnt human nature, madam, is far from
being equal to tough liver three times
a day. If you recollect, said be.
fore, / am very particular where I
board. Madam, are you married
woman
"Yes.~I am. and I'm tired Of an.
s swering your questions. If you don't
want board here just go aways" and
the excited landlady alushed the soap.
suds over the window panes, and made
aer brush fly like gin saw. The
man etiIl leaned on the fence and
gazed at her steadily.
Madam, see you have temper,
he remarked, when she turned around
to see-if he had gone; and a tenn.
per, when it is not controlled, often
creates a great deal of misery and no
end of divorce suits. I've no doubt
That, when irritated by household du-
:, ties aud cares, that you often give
your husband sound rebuking, and
is be is prematurely bald-headed
man, it's your own fault; yet you are
not to blame for that which nature
endowed you With. But this trouble
can be obviated. l have here, mad
ap," and he dived into a square
shaped box, "a valuable work enti-
tied, i"Home Made Happy; or, The
Domestic Guide" This excellent vol
ume I will sell you FOR the sum of fif-
ty cents. AS I prev ously remarked,
you cannot be blamed for your tenn
per. Every red-headed woman with
,epo nose and brown wart under
her left eye, has sour temper, but ii
you wiz only follow the suggestions
siaid down in the book, you, home will
be paradise, and-''