The Waco daily examiner. [volume] (Waco, Tex.) 187?-1888, 1881-12-07
TEE TELEPHONES Fun.
What ID Has Tried 10 Convert
Into "a Humorous '.sensa-
fiOn.''

For two or three days the Telephone
has been deVoting the greater part OF
It's local space to mysterious hints and
illusions respecting some stupendous,
.oc-good-to-keep sell or practica!
coke perpetrated on the editorial staff
If the Examiner. People who read the
Telephone must have had then
curiosity whetted to a painful degree
IN their endeavors to comprehend the
my steriouS joke on the EXAMINER, thai
seemed so passingly captivating to the
Telephone folks. AT first We paid no
attention to the matter, but as there IS
plenty oi space this morning and our
neighbor is nearly dead to provoke
some answer from us, we will tell
the history of the very common
place incident that the Telephone
mas dressed up IN mysterious illusions,
20 be masGueraded before the pnbilc
is AN unprecedented good Joke or
Ill" on the Examiner statf-we want
the public to see what our nelghbor
| regards as IA good joke Saturday
night Coot David and a party Of Young
| men, friends of his, induced young
man who is said to be named Perry to
| disguise his features SO as to be I'M
recognizable to those who knew INN,
and to make the rounds of the town
! with the BOYS. The plan was to nitro
| duce Penny as one Professor Rider,
recently arrived from Tennessee, who
was making a visit to Waco. lie was
also to he represented as line mn
sician. This plan was pursued and
among the places visited were the
newspaper offices Telephone and EX-
AMrNER). The plan worked well,
Everybody greeted " Prof. Rider with
courtesy and bade him welcome
to Waco. The EXAMINER staff were
| certainly as polite as they knew how To
be. When Coot David and ms friends
had finished their frollc they were IN
nigh glee over how they had fooled
everybody, but they kindly advised the
Telephone people of the identity OF
Prof. Rider" else the Telephone mad
never known that Prof. Rider was
the young man Penny. Tins Is the
huge 'sell' that our nelghbor has been
making SO much fuss over, Tor two
mornings, as being perpetratcd ON the
EXAMINER. Now we have no desire to
lessen Mr.. Penry's Importance, Tor we
suppose he is very worthy, nice
young man, and we regret 10 destroy
the Telephones good joke, but the
truth of the matter Is that # was alto
gether unnecessary, SO far as selling
| the Examiner was concerned, to DIS
guise young Mr.. Penny. lie might
nave come in his unadorned,
native individuality, aud 1t
would have been all the same
| to the Examiner, for each and every
| meHber OF our staff was blsSfully II
uorant of the fact that III Waco or any
where else there was such "A yonng man
as tins Mr.. Penny. We have since
learned that he is a clerk III a plaza
store and very clever sort OF Young
man. The Telephone local, who knew
! Penny, supposed that necessarily every
! BODY else must know him, and hence
ms successful masquerade was sell
on the EXAMINER. Plain and un-
adorned this is the "joke" that the
Telephone has been thrustlng on the
public for tive mornings with such a
please, dear public, do laugh air.
Our neighbor has played the part that
one Kaiser, a gOod-natured but not
overly smart Teuton did some years
ago, when the slang phrase show Is
that for high?7 was all the rage.
Kaiser heard it one day and
mentally pronounced it good, re
solving to play it on somebody first
opportunity. SO next day, after taking
glass of lager with his friend Hotfen-
stein, the twain walked down "a street
IN plain view of which was q very tall
church spire. This HOtlenstein was a
shrewd Hebrew-as shrewd as the
Uncle Isaac" whom Max Fehrman will
portray at Garland's opera-house to-
night. Pointing to the towering spire,
Kaiser said to his friend: "Hoffenstein,
you see dot church steeble?" Hofien-
stem answered: "Yes, [ see it." Quoth
Kaiser: "Well, how high is dOt?'
"How high is dose stcehle?" unused
Hoileustein, as he measured the Spire
with accurate eye should say about
two hundred feet" Kaiser was excited.
He said hurriedly: "Nein, nein! dot is
not the answer ! asks you how high
is dot?" "Und tells you" rejoined
Hoffenstein, "ahout two hundred feet
maybe two hundred aud ten" Poor
Kaiser chow is that for high ~ had
faded from his mind. He could only
ask, "how high is dot ?" and when his
friend, seeing 10 Joke, gave straight
forward answers wondering, too, if
Kaiser was crazy that he should think
such commonplace matter "A joke
Kaiser could only say To himself ::
"Dere ought to be a joke about dis,
und drinks vas getting it off on
HoiTenstein; but, by dam | vas only
making one fool of myself" There is
a moral to this story, dear neighbor,
which We throw in free, like a chrome.
II is this Be sure that You really
have a Joke" or sell on your neigh
Dor before you hold him mp for other
people to laugh at. Otherwise what
appears to be so utterly funny to you
may seem very stupid to those You
want 10 make laugh.
Riveire's FEVER AND AGUE IoNIC Is
a sure cure for chills and fever