The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-06-30
Two Old Physicians.

The other night Drs. Snort and Bilkins,
two of the oldest physicians in the country,
met at hotel in Cleveland. They were
on q Journey, and their meeting was acct
dental.
ave must occupy the same room" insist
ed DR.. Snort. 1T has been SO long since
met an old-time doctor that the occasion
shall retain pleasant memories"
Nothing would give me greater pleas
ure," answered DR.. Bilkins 1T is pleas
ant to meet q genuine physician"
The two old men were shown room,
where, with bright fire, they built an ad-
dition to an acquaintance begun when Ohio
was not regarded as the great state of pres
idential production.
"There are a great many tricks in the
medical profession now" said DR.. Snort
| these upstart doctors are killing the peO-
pie off at shameful rate"
ut wasn't so in our day, replied DR.. Bill
kins; "a boy 10 years of age wasn't en-
gagged as a family physician then"
mo; nor there wasn't that jealousy ex.
listing between doctors that you find now
It's all right to talk about enterprise and
young blood, but doctor shonld not be too
enterprising."
After talking until the fire had burned
out, the two friends retired. Speaking
about young DOCTORS" said DR.. Snort, Il
have always held that the best physician is
he who has the age. 1t is all practice any
way, and believe that 5O-year-old doc
tor is more reliable than one 40 years old
EYES," said Bilkins, "but after they pass
so it doesn't make much difference
Eyes it does. A 55-year old doctor is
naturally more reliable than one SO years
old"
"Now, here" said Bilkins, "you say that
| just because l am so and you are about IS.
"No, didn't think of the difference il
our ages. However, in our case it is diff
ferent"
"Don't try to crawl out of it, doctor, you
meant it as an insinuation. You can't pull
the wool over my eyes, for can doctor tho
life out of you any time"
mo doubt of it. Let's 20 to Sleep"
"Sleep, the duce," said Bilkins turning
over. "Stir man up and then tell him t.
go to sleep! I want you to understand
that I stand higher as physician than you
do.n
mo use to talk that way when you
know that / can doctor the socks off you
'Thats the trouble You can doctor the
socks off anybody. suppose you are not
aware that Bilsley tells it all around the
neighborhood that you killed his wife,"
See here" snarled Snort, "you are get.
ting too internal insolent for an old man
never intended to say anything about it
but l know one thing concerning your med.
ical career that is blot on the profession
You poisoned Glaxson's child out of pure
Ignorance"
"You are rheumatic old liar" exclaim-
ed Bilkins, springing up. "You are wheel.
ing old scoundrel"
"You old carbon crow!' yelled Snort, II
wouldn't take that from my father"
"Take your hands of: I'll punch the
life out Of you. Take that" howled Bill
kins, as he struck the wall with his fist.
Then they grappled, and began mouth
to-mouth engagement. They rolled out of
bed, got up, braced, grappled and fell again.
Finally the night porter broke open the
door, rushed in and lit the gas. Snort stood
in one corner of the room, holding chair.
DR.. Bilkins stood on the bed with boot
in his hand.
SDrive that mailman outw exclaimed
Snort. HE has been trying 10 murder me"
"He is an old iarp vociferated Bilkins
"he tried to poison me. Shoot him. Call
the police and let them kill him."
Several men, disturbed by the noise, en-
tered the room, and the two old friends
were compelled to occupy different apart
ments. The affair has created q profound
sensation, and warrants of arrest have been
issued for the old-time physicians.
Artists proofs of engravings are impress
ions taken with great care under the super
vision of the artist himrelf before the reg
ular edition is printed. They are always
on the best of paper, and are more perfect
than those printed subsequently from the
same plates. AS but a very few are ever
struck off from the same plate, they are
highly priced and command large prices. 4