Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1881-08-12
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4 Comedy OF BluntIers
New York Sun.


Why, who has been smashing your
turmture?' the reporter asked in
amaZcment as he entered the sitting
room of Mr.. Brenton Wards house III
Monroe St. Brooklyn, and noticed that
= handsome, highly-polished rosewood
writing table, for which lie knew Mr.
Ward had paid $50 few DAYS previ-
ously, was wrecked and ruined. The
back part Of the drawer was wrenched
out, and Splintcrs of wood were on the
floor. a hammer, chisel, and saw
ON the csrpet seemed to indicate that
the mischief was OF recent occurrence,
and bag OF gold com was on the sofa.
Mr.. Ward looked foolishly ut his wife
and Mrs. Ward looked dejcctedly mt her
husband rs hc stood in his shirt sleeves
before her.
We'll, | suppose may rs well tell
the story, Mr.. Ward said, as he slow
ly resumed his coat, and wiped the
beads from his brow with his handkcr-
chief Il did it with Marv's assistance
ten minutes ago You see, Inever was
II Vanderbilt i'll point of wealth, and
when my poor old uncle died the other
day and left me 5000 il somewhat de-
moralized me- | changed il all into
goli-the gold yCu see on the sofa-and
placed it III the table drawer. looked
at il pretty often, you may be sure, and
about half an hour before vou came in
| went To the drawer and tried Ia apea
i. The key would not turn, and after
had blown into il till the whistle il
gave could be heard ut the other end of
the block, and was black in the face,
both Mary and came to the concIus-
ion that somebody had been tampering
with the lock.
Mary nearly tainted at the prospect
Of the gold having been stolen, and
suggeste that information of the mat
ter be sent to the police at once. ]
thought, however, that we had better
first break into the drawer, and satisfy
ourselves that the money was really
gone. We borrowed a chisel, saw,
and Il hammer of the old gentleman
next door, and ] set to work with Il will
The result you see. The table was ut
teriv ccstroycd III five minutes, hat i
was great relief to find the gold al
light. We had broken in mt the back.
and there is nothing the matter with
the lock. The girl, after moving the
table out from the wall 10 dust behind
il, had put it back wrong side first; but
both sides are made exactly alike. the
only difference being that what looks
like Il keyhole in the back is false. and.
of course could rot turn the key in
It. Il WAS all owing TO the greenhorn
girls stupidity, you sec"
The Wealthiest Chinaman In New York
Tom Lee Is a short, slender man Of
modest manner, and uf an extremely
retiring disposition. lie wears n stiff
Derby hat, into the crown Of which he
pokes his queue. This causes the hair
ON the back Of his head to stand out
like the quilts of an angry porcupine,
or the har on cats back, rubbed the
wrong way He has tiny black NOUS
tache, and sparse growth Of wiry
black hair on his chin. He wears n
diamond pin in an old-fashioned scraf.
and an cight-ounce gold watch chain
bangles from the third button Of his
waistcoat. He is well-to-do; owns three
tea farms in China, and il worth a few
thousands, perhaps. He is "a very in
fluential man among Cinnamon. He
is Christian, a citizen, a deputy sher-
if, and is married to girl who was
born down town, somewhere in that
neighborhood She has born him a
lovely little daughter, of whom Tom
Lee is justly very proud. He talks
pigeon-English, but he dresses as you
and ] do, except that he wears his
queue. Very many among the 5000
Chinese in New York retain their pig-
tails, not because they cannot 90 back
to China without them, or because Of
any heather notion about them, but
because good many Cinnamon who
were cigarette or cigar makers in Cuba
have come here from Cuba without
their queues. They were rid Of those
appendages in Cuban prisons where
they were sent for wrong doing, and it
is considered best by respectable China
men not to cut Of the queue, so as to
Obviate the necessity Of explaining
where and how it disappeared