St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1881-02-04
A Remarkable Experience.

The recent re markablG experience of
Prof. Won Schweinhund, of the Mil
waukee Polytechnic Institute, promised
at one time to be of great interest to all
philosophers, and especially to cleo
tricians. Although this promise was
not fulfilled, it is, nevertheless, true
that the experience in question was
quite unprecedented, and deserves the
attention of all thinking men.
On the night of the 2Ist of December
Prof. Won Schweinhund was spending
the evening with number of friends
at the residence of - Smith, Esq,
discussing the philosophy of the uncOn-
ditiOned in connection with Milwaukee
beer. AT ! o'clock a. m. it occurred to
him that Mrs. Won Schweinhund would
be uneasy at his prolonged absence
from home, and would undoubtedly
sit up for him and welcome him with
energetic hands in an exceedingly warm
manner. He therefore took a final
glass of beer, put on his capacious ul-
ster, and bade the company farewell.
The night was exceedingly cold, and
the pavement was unusually active in
its motions. This, together with the
weakness in the Professors legs, due to
IA severe cold in the head, led him to
pause by a convenient lamp-pOst to
collect his thoughts. He rested for sew
eral minutes, unbuttOned his ulster to
look at his watch, buttOned it up again,
and summOning his energies, prepared
to resume his walk. To his great alarm
he found that he could not move from
the spot. An unseen and unknown
force held him tight to the iron lamp
post, and his most frantic efforts could
not enable him to release himself. His
first impression was that he had been
tied to the lamp-pOst by thieves while
resting himself, but he cOuld not dis
cover the slightest trace of any rope,
and was thus compelled to abandon
the hypothesis. Soon he began to feel
a strange sensation of something very
cold in the region of his breast and alb
dOmen. 1t was clear to him that a cold
current was running from his breast
bone downward, and being a profound
philosopher, he reasoned that, as he
felt this current in front, it must really
be in active operation somewhere else,
and was, undoubtedly, running down
his spinal column. After deep mcdita-
tiOn he finally remembered that be had
heard that certain streets in Milwaukee
were soon to be lighted by the electric
light.
He looked upward at the lamp above
his head and saw that it WAS not only
extremely bright, but that it seemed ia
be divided into three or four separate
lamps. He now cOmprehended the
mystery of his imprisonment. The
Iamp-post to which he was fastened
was evidently one of those to which
the electric light had been applied.
The electric current passing through
the iron lanp-post had been switched
off by the attraction of his spinal col
umn, aud was flowing through him
producing the sensation of extreme cold
and fastening him with force Of sew
eral tons to the lamp post.
The horror of his situation now clear
| ly stared Prof. Won Schweinhund in the
face. He saw that not only would be
he held to the lamp post until some one
should come to his assistance and turn
off the electric current, but that in all
probability the electricity would grad
ually disintegrate his spinal marrow
and thus either kill him outright, or re-
duce him to a miserable, spineless, ge-
latinous wreck. Moreover, he feared
that the cold produced by the current
would effect his heart, and by disturb
ing his circulation bring about a fata
result. In these circumstances he
hOwled for help, but the silence of th'
midnight streets remained unbrOker
except by bis agonized voice.
About 2 o'clock two young men came
down the street, and, attracted by the
professors cries, kindly stopped anC
listened to his story. In the most un.
feeling manner they burst into laugh
and refused to give him any help
They even made rude remarks concern
ing beer, aud told him that the colo