Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-04-10
O'LEARY'S SUB.


Mr.. Whiffles-the respected parent Of
our hero, Mr. Adolphus Whifies-was
an opulent Berkshire farmer, who, be-
fore retiring from his business and leav-
ing it to his son, fancied that visit to
the gres5 metropolis would have the eff
feet OF sharpening the wits Of that anna
BILE youth, an operation of which that
young gentleman stood greatly in need.
The son jumped at the idea, especially
when he learned he was to setforth on his
travels alone. With the parental bless
ing and his purse well filed, Mr.. Whites,
Jr., duly arrived in London and installed
himself in economical quarters in Savoy
street, Strand.
The theaters, of course, occupied q
large share of Mr.. Whites attentions
during his stay in London, and the
neighborhood OF stage doors afforded
him vast amount of satisfaction. The
sight of professionals in their every
day costume was to him source of great
qualification, and his delight when he
made the acquaintance of prominent
member of the orchestra of the Royal
Dash Theater exceeded all bounds. He
vowed eternal friendship for him on the
spot, and there and then ratified the
agreement by entertaining his new ac-
quaintanee at q recherche supper at the
Albion. Our story opens when Mr..
Whites and his companion = Mr..
O'Leary by name-had been almost in
SEPARATES for the space Of six weeks.
With pain Mr.. Whites had lately OBJ
served an expression of settled melan-
choly upon Mr.. O'Leary's expressive
countenance, and had resolutely de-
termined to divine the cause.
"You are ill?" said our hero one
evening, after they had supped at the
hosiery above mentioned. and were
quaffing various ".whiskies hot to pro-
mote digestion.
Mr.. O'Leary sighed, shook his head
sadly, and emptied his glass by way of
a reply.
"Your supper has disagreed with you
you have eaten too much, )" continued
Mr.. Whites tenderly.
est isn't the supper that worries me-"
observed his companion; "it's the sub
stitute."
This mysterious answer puzzled Mr..
Whites. He thought it over seriously,
then gave it up in despair, and de-
manded an explanation. Mr.. O'Leary
vigorously pulled at his cigar and pro-
ceeded to enlighten Mr.. WHITES.
Itappeared from Mr.. O'Leary's ac-
count that it was customary in the Roy
al Dash Theater for the management to
allow various members of the orchestra
to absent themselves from time to time
from their posts in order to attend con-
certs or other entertainments, on the
condition that they provided efficient
substitutes to fulfill their ordinary du-
ties. AS rule, these substitutes were
not hard to find, but Mr.. OLeary con-
fessed, with tears in his eyes, that, al
though he had searched high and low,
for some unaccountable reason he could
find no one able or willing to supply his
place at the theater while he was absent
to fill most profitable engagement he
had accepted to play at a fashionable
West End concert the ensuing evening:
Without q moments hesitation Mr..
Whites threw himself into the breach
and proffered his services.
"Stuff |" replied Mr.. OLeary, rude
ly, "what do you know about music ?"
Mr.. Whites couldn't tell. He was
quite certain about what he didn't know,
but that he refrained from mentioning.
There was painful pause. Mr.. OLea-
ry smoked silently on for some time, now
and then darling searching glance upon
the anxious face of Mr.. Whites, as if he
were revolving some great scheme In the
innermost recesses of his own mind, but
as yet scarcely saw the manner in which
it could be carried out Suddenly-'sI
have it. Thanks, Whites, my boy. [
accept your generous offer. You shall
be my substitute, said Mr. O'Leary.
To say that Mr.. Whites was delight
ed would but feebly express the state of
his mind. He grasped Mr.. O'Leary's
hand and shook it fervently. He trem-
bled already with excitement. His
proudest hopes were about to be real
lied. He would be admitted behind the
scenes OF the theater. Words failed to
convey any idea of his feelings as he lent
awilling ear to MIR. O'Leary, who pro-
ceeded to give him the necessary in
struchons.
In the first place Mr.. O'Leary pointed
out that there were two trombone play
ers in the orchestra of the Royal Dash
Theater, he himself being one, and that
for the especial guidance of Mr.. Whit
fes he would summarily state the case
as follows, promising that after the ris-
ing OF the curtain on the first piece a
performance upnn The two trombones
heralded the approach of the villain of
the piece
Further, lis (Mr. O'Leary's) expert
ence induced him to believe that in a
crowded assembly one trombone would