Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1881-06-25
9itNinia FREE grrss.
WIrTISCISSORS.

IUTtNl~llr OF faAE NN N"A"" &N VI
ten stuck cup people.
The country is ready TO trade the dead
lock for a lockjaw.
This Nihilist business IS a-bomb-iua-ble-
o~yichikofski.
Fall opening-A dozen rsw ON the halt
shell.
Men whose business is looking up-As-
trOn0mers.
A profit is appreciated in its own eoun-
try.
\ hen is not joking when she is in ernest
not much.
One of the greatest wonders in this world
is what becomes OF all the smart children.
The worst thing about a mosquito Is its
long soliloquy as 70 when and where he had
better settle down and bite.
Almost every Young lady is public spiri-
ted enough to let her fathers house be used
as a court house.
Greece was once a power among nations,
but now it is only a spo; OF oleomargarine
on the map.
Emerson called Caalyle "a trip-hammer
with an KOlian attachment" Did he
mean a bellows
Indians never drink to drown sorrow.
When they get anything TO drink they have
no sorrows 10 drown.
"Ohio' Is said to be the Japanese for
Chow DO YOU d02' II is likewise the Chi
nese for &" l want to get an Office
Druggists are getting up corners on soda
water. Their efforts viii end IN a hzzie.
The Signal Service cannot bring a little
shower % lay The dust without stopping over
and making mud of 1t.
A fair exchange is no robbery but fan
'cy fairs, where the young ladies 40 tables
give no change back, Is another thing.
Coffee county, Tenn. is being settled up
by immigrants from Massachusetts,. or
course they must find good grounds upon
which 20 settle.
A brave man may face 81 mad bull with
fire ia his eve and courage In his heart, but
a sign marked smallpox tetches HIM.
Henry Abbey saws he never met with a
more perfect lady than sara Bemhardt, and
there is probably little doubt that he has
the money to show for it.
Sintetne Sh'e-go Tic T;, S -, ~
s'l0.t.u'i - .. l,,.+ ~
nav
eI-''' '-'"
Mrs. Harriet Beecher stowe thinks it is
very iuartistic to knit q mans foot gear
straight. Doesn't Il, depend, Harriet, ON
Whose socks il is tha, is gorcd.
a tai'9' was SlaltIJ" Vly o,"y' o"! =! UIo
te'"l" Vi d 'I'' I' .
lt'i' WIN u m','5' t""'
WAS 'e'Po'''""! "'
IN m~atrImonI" ever mas 9ToNea 'e,'
say tIg "'e." H"y "'y A"0
Pro9aoi!'
Mother. ulsy { 20 olt to svceoe
Yes. my ch4r.uins du,ter
Nd iS6 r1 nclr tle cutter
r, d.,
Tray, now Shal j. i''lc t'V' ." Slt'A
ING MAKE q inquire. want ttt .uo TU'1"u
Der season come, A, ool l"al VII" u'u-
oie you VIZ ~ '"'
4"ey van % eau ,'. All. 'llll s.Lc o'
Nl1sita rams N@-"i"yJ ~-''o-5I Wy
'hiiN O~'''''"' 'i' "''''" PC "'o'0 '
An Ehnr3 Ilut VINO SEM @l of''5 ll tc
spouse % al advertisement oHeIins uses
tul household articles Tor aturet-cenl stamp
received - pms.
The body Of our prayers Is tne sum oil
our duty ami aS we must ask OF GOA Whay
soefer We necu, 80 We must l"''' TOT "l'
WAT we ask.
When a French woman doesn't like her
eyebrows she SLAVES them Oh ana buys a
new pair for forty cents. Nature cant De-
gin 10 compete with q woman iorstyIc.
"a. vo,,,, no C.ri,tb Miss took ash
lort tcs IN mol, her loan and She skinned
for Inc hotter land lust am hour ahead of
the lean woman who WAS eating gum arabic
~ mako ber f,t
The ranort that tbe Car has ordered So
OOO barrels of wbiskey from Louisville is of /
She Jsepe,t ,iguifca1ce. II indicates. be-
r.rJ , d,pbt fb,t he is taking measures to
c,mpromise Will Inc Nibilists.
wan whitman i'O'uI0N .l 80, "
tbot he viii rad his poems there. but not
mill nevt fU This win olive even the
I,n,o nl.ntv nj tima to ,st o,t If TOWN
sara, the glrt who could Kick hIghcr tlan
my other GIRL ma NNIurnN & frrlTH. UN> re-