Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1881-09-08
A Double BarreIed Joke.

The other evening, round at Mccoy
ern's, the boys were putting up an
elaborate pract1cal joke on somebody,
and they asked old Captain Sk1ddy, who
had just happened in, to take hand.
"No, gentlemen" said that estima-
BILE old gentleman, derisively; you
don't catch me taking part in any pFac-
tical jokes. I went out of that business
for good over ten years ago"
How was that % asked the group of
beer exterminators.
"Well, it was in the winter Of 10, may
be II. was living in Davenport,
Iowa, and man came round there Civ
ing balloon ascensions. One day it was
advertised that the mayor Of the town
was going up with him. Now, the mayor
was big, fat man, who always wore a
light suit Of clothes and white hat.
This put me in the notion of working
off a joke on the people. l got ac-
quainted with the aeronaut, and he
agreed to assist me IN the scheme. We
then got an old suit Of light clothes
and fixed up dummy, which we filled
with sand, SO that it weighed about
two hundred pounds, and would, there
fore, drop straight and heavy like q
man. The day of the ascension there
were over 10000 people on the ground,
and the excitement was very great, as
there was light wind blowing at the
time. After the balloon got up about a
mile, and maybe that far south Of the
town, they dropped the dummy over"
tsBiq sensation then. eh ~
Well, | should say SO. But that
just where I lost my grip. While the
crowd was shouting and going wild
with horror just laid down on the
ground, rolled over and laughed until I
was Just sick"
"ShouId think the crowd would have
taken tumble, too," suggested the
audience.
"But Just wait. Of course the crowd
made break out of town to scrape up
the remains, and / rushed home to get
my fishing tackle, for it struck me that
the most healthy thing Icould do would
be to go fishing for day or two. Be-
fore left the house, however, | was
arrested for murder"
"For murder ?"
Exactly. A lot of the boys, accom-
panied by the sheriff, rushed in and
collared me- They claimed that the
dummy had fallen on a farmer and
driven his skull clear into the heel of
his boots. They said that the balloon
attic had turned States svidence, and
the chances, were I'd be hung by mob
before night"
"That was rough"
Well, so i thought. I was just
scared plum to death, and begged the
boys to stand by and protect me.
ponied up fifty dollars for legal ex-
penses, and they hid me in the garret
OF a neighbor's house. They kept me
there ten blessed days, and there was
not q day but they struck me for a
twenty or two for contingencies One
night the whole gang came around full
Of beer-on my money, mind you-a and
said that they had concluded, as addi-
tional precaution, to hide me in the
hollow of an old oak tree about three
miles out in the woods. I saw through
Hs whole business then, and drove 'em
out with club. It was good square
case Of the bitter bit, know, but they
never let up calling me Dummy
Skiddy after that, until they actually
drove me out OF the town, and had tc
emigrate to this iumping-of place ol
creation" and the captain shook his
head with disgusted air as he walked
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