Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-10-23
FAOETIE.
A busy retail grocer,

A busy retail grocer,
Whom we all surely know, Sir.
Was asked one day in a friendly way.
Bya country chap who had come to stag
Till the mail came in at close OF oay'
"What are your gross receipts, snF
s'He, hel ha, ha! no, no! Sir
Laughed the busy retail grocer
As he pointed out, with laugh and shout
The barrels and boxes ranged aboutS
"You can plainly see, beyond doubt
What are my grocery seats, siri"
Cannibals sometimes have their neigh
bors at dinner.
Boston girls never hang up ther.
stockings; an exchange says that they
suspend their hosiery.
Old Nickelpinch says he has often
seen men buck the tiger, but for ms
part he would rather buekwheat cakes
Be not cast down, impecunious sir;
there is plenty of good things IN store
for you. All you need is the money To
get them out.
DR.. Swing says that in time women
will develop into angels. No one was
ever bold enough to accuse man OF any
intentions in that direction.
To the query of a Danbury dentist
to an applicant for new set as to what
sort of teeth she wanted, she said.
ssSomething that won't show dirt.
s.Affiance oyster buyer is the latest
designation for girls young man
The name will be changed to engaged
ice cream purchaser in the summer.
The worst about kissing Pittsburg
girl is that you carry the marks OF coal
dust about your nose and other features
Burlington Haaokeye.
A Northern paper praises the SIN
dian Hair Restorer." He is a fraud
No Indian was ever known to restore
any hair. He files it away as certif-
cate on which to draw rations from
Uucle Sam.
A young man, while out searching for
his fathers pig, accosted an rishman
as follows: ''Have you seen a stray
pig about here?'' Pat responded:
s'Faix, how could l tell stray pig from
any other?"
A Milwaukee policeman has fallen
heir to 100000, and every female cook
on his beat wants him to keep his prom,
Use at once, and he wonders how he's
going to avoid about fifty breach of
promise suits.
ssGive me the hand that will never
deceive me-" said a young Harmelite
in the presence of some young ladies
the other evening. 81 guess" said q
young lady, ''a straight flush IS the
only kind of a hand you want"
Rejected lovers need never despair.
There are four-and-twenty hours in g.
day, and not moment in the twenty
four in which woman may not change
her mind. E'enod.
Georgia is gradually arranging mil
lennium of its own. The new Constr
tuition of that State provides that the
Legislature shall meet but once in two
years, and then sit but forty days.
Herr Reulaux, German writer, has
described an elevated wooded valley in
the Rhine Province, in which the pas
sage of the wind produces musical tones
wonderfully like the Ginning of bells.
They were walking by the seaside,
and he sighed and she sighed; and she
was by his side, and he by her side, and
they were both beside themselves, be-
side being at the seaside, where she
sighed and he sighed.
Andrews Bazaar says that q lady
who owns an amiable husband was
asked how she had ever brought him
to such perfection; whereupon she
sweetly answered that she did it with
croquet mallet.
A shop was broken into one night,
but strange to say, nothing was carried
off. The proprietor was making his
boast of it, at the same time expressing
his surprise at losing nothing. "Noth-
ing at all surprising" said his neigh
bors; .'the robbers lighted lamp, didn't
theyp" eyes," was the reply. "Well,'
continued the neighbor, ''they found
your goods marked up so high they
couldn't afford to take them"