Mexico weekly ledger., 1881-02-03


| There is no hope of happiness for
her, for she never can forget that this
arm has also embraced her.
Spoopendyke's Calls.
; From the Brooklyn Eagle.
snow. my DEAR" said Mr. Spoop-
endyke, ''let me see the list of ladies
you wish me to call on. l really
don't care to go round much, but a
man ought to do what his wife wants
him to do on New Years Day.
! Where's the list?''
"Here it is," said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, fluttering around with her hair
in her mouth. II wrote them all out
with the addresses for you, so you
wouldn't have any trouble"
'What makes you put old Sister
Lamb at the head of the list?" growl-
ed hlr Spoopendyke. "She's got a
wart on her chin the size of a fire
bell, and she can't talk anything but
the advantages of egg over stove coal
for heating the Sunday school"
"But she belongs to the church,
and don't believe any one else will
call on her," reasoned Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke. ''She will be tickled to death
to see you.''
"What do you think I'm starting
out for?" demanded Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, fiercely. SCOT an idea I'm
around like missionary to carry the
gospel to people everybody else is
afraid of? Who's this? What's this
second name here? Who's Mrs. Shkl-
ymbretoy?''
"That's Mrs. Wolverton. I prom
ised her you would call. Never
mind Mrs. Lamb, but you ought to
call on Mrs. Wolverton."
"What for? What has she got in
common with me, except that her
bones are hollow? She don't know
the difference between a Guinea pig
and the burning of Jerusalem. Al
ways wants to know, if don't think
that Sodom and Gomorrah were par
ables. Is that the kind of list you We
made out? Want me to run around
among the old monuments? Who's
Miss Swash!'
"That's Mrs. Smith, the little
widow. You know she's interested
in sending women out West to get
husbands. She'll amuse you.''
''She will if she sees me. She'll
make me laugh like a hyena il she
gets one eye on me. Who's that vel.
low w-headed girl that sits two pews in
front of US? I'd call on her, now. -
''She's little chit of thing. Yos
don't want to run sitter those young
peoples man of your age!"
"What's the reason 1 DON'T -
howled Mr.. Spoopendyke. SCOT ar
idea that l only care for the tough
old people, haven't you? Think l. n
a sort of Plymouth Rock, don't you
Got any more old landmarks tha,
need Inspection"
II don't care - demonstrated Mrs
Spoopendyke, Indignantly; "they'r.
nice people, and like to cultivate
them. They may be along in life
but they can't help it,"
"Cultivate 'em if you want to-
growEed Mr.. Spoopendyke; shut i
you think I'm going hoeing arount
among 'em on the first of January
you're left. What dye want to cul
tivate 'em for? With your friend
and ideas you only need weekl,
> prayers and an alarm OF fire to be al
y : old woman's home. Who else hav'
. !, you got here? Mrs. Sliggonspratt
Mrs. Woptenslough, Miss Mimpzf-'
"You don't read them right a
ALL" complained Mrs. Spoopendyke
=. That's Mrs. Silverspoon, and Mrs
~ ~ Worthington, and Miss Hemming
;. way. They're just as nice as the,
Z can be-"
"And they are the three old wor
c thies who howl in the church choir: 2
:. asked Mr.. Spoopendyke, sternly
~ - They've got grandson old enoug
{ to be my father.'
"rhey haven't sobbed Mrs
1t Spoopendyke. "You know better.
t, swell, most of 'em have. WIS
h dye want me to call on them for
Got any more old almanacs expect
t. ing me? Where's the Sphinx? Yo
haven't got the Sphinx down here
r nor the Tower cf Babel. Who'r
these other pyramids: Who's Mrs
Upsldedown?'
" "That's Mrs. Edgerton. She ser
N you the jelly when you were sicl
and you said she was the best woma
to in Brooklyn. You'll have to call O
her for politeness," said Mrs. Spool
4. endyke. severely.
We II won't either!" shouted NJ
We Spoopendyke. 1.-The jelly was sou
~ and she made me pay a dollar towal
Us a plaster-of-parls angel for a starvir
family out in FlAtbush. Who's th
ne other nurse Of George Washington.
Here, this is mistake; | went to O
}" Miss Schumslock' funeral thir
years ago."
"You didn't! You never did
ou proclaimed Mrs. Spoopendyke, tho
Oh oughly aroused. "That isn't
er name, either. It's Miss Schofiel
to and she's the best friend I've &C
an l only want
ID, II know what you want" hiss,
N, Mr.. Spoopendyke. "iou want fl
to more acquaintances, and map,
ed be gulde-book to ancient rro
Think I'm going to call on that G
af- monolith? Got anything here that /
er- longs to modern times? Know an
body who has been dug up within &
on or eight centuries? Who's that blac
eyed girl in the Biole-class? DoI
lat she hang out flag to-day?'
eet 81 wouldn't look at her." sniff
Mrs. Spoopendykc, II wouldn't ha
rs, you go there for worlds. Besid,
AK she don't receive"
elf "What's thls?' demanded d
ng Spoopendyke. whats Mrs. Win
ids ietyx got to do with it! What ce
etery will find her mp
THAT'S Mrs. Willoughby," {
ing planned Mrs. Spoopendyke, compl'
entity. ''She's the young widow "
-. ..on,<lx, ;o;noJ tho ohuroh -