The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1881-07-22

IVT all ltlat VIC nave uutOlO treasures,
wc did but know it,"
heard of them before. If you hav,
such an abu undance, l wish you'd spare
me enough to buy that black silk dres
you promised mo so long ago.
1t Is not to be inferred from this re
mark that my wife is prone to eNtrav
agance in her tastes or habits. She i
usually content with plain and modes
attire. She has never hidden hcrsel
in the receSSeS of 4 whalebonc pyra
mid, nor submitted to the modern
species of female cooperage; for us she
playfully remarks, "Anybody can see
that l am tub without my being
hooped." (She weighs two hundred
and one pounds avoirdupois.) No u1l
paid milliner's bills haunt her waking
hours (nor mine). No needy dress
makers rise up in judgement against
her. Her bonnet is much too large 70,
our youngest daughter, aged eight
! years, and really seems designed 70,
use rs we'll as ornament; and from my
| long acquaintance With her, I am salts
tied that she has something i'll hei
head worth protecting, unlike those
ladies who patronize curtailed bonnets
with more ribbon than crown, and
more curtail than comfort.
She fully agrees with me when lee
ture our young female friends Oh the
cNtravagancc of the age, although she
contends that the mon are as much to
| be blamed for it us the women. OF
course l never assent to this PROPOSE
| ton; and that leads to a friendly argu-
ment, from which, in my opinion,
always gain the advantage--thoughI /
must confess that l am occasionally
overbornc by Il torrent OF words, espec-
tally when some friendly ncighbor es-
pouscs my wife's side of the question
In such cases l beat hasty retreat,
attack upon the position of the enemy
under more favoradly auspices.
My wife detests hounces (shc is too
stout to wear them), has no hankering
after 'moire antique" and only knows
Of ''Honiton" by having seen it men,
toned in our daily paper. TO be sure
She dosen't believe all the criticisms
upon the fashions which she secs in
that paper, and even goes SO far as to
say that she has no idea that tho cdi-
tor himself believes them. / think
she is hardly just to the editor
a very clever fellow by-the-way,
who never NEEDLES with anything but
politics, except Church matters, ladies'
dresses, and ashland who never gets
into trouble AS long as no sticks to pol
itics and fish.
But to return to tho black silk ,srcss.
Some years ago (I don't care to rcincm-
Der how many), under the influence of
an excess of affection and a uclusion in
regard to my financial prospects, had
made Il rash promise to purchase such
an article for her especial use and
adOrment; but had coupled the prom
ise with the important proviso, s'somc
timc.' We had previously can vasscd
tho relative merits of calicOcs, cash
mcres, silks and satins and had decided
that one good silk dress was worth half
Il dozen of any of the Others, not only
for its present purpose but as being
more available in its later stages for
the decoration of the young sicons of
our house, and a SLY hint was thrown
out that a spare "brcadth'' out of the
skirt might be very useful in rciacing
any coat of mine that might happen to
stand in need Of that operation. The
'ssOme time' before alluded to, has not
yet arrived, and from present appear
anccs it is as far Off as when the prom
isc was made. Still, it fingers in my
wife's memory, aud she occasionally
brings it to mind among, ! fear, many
other unfulfillcd promises.
"In regard to tho dress, you may de-
pend upon having it some time,' but
the treasures of which l was speaking
are not exactly available for that pur-
pose at present. l replied; sbut i can
easily convince you that we arc pos
sessed of them. Are there not seven
rosy-chcckcd chcrubs (at least you call
them SO when they arc not in mischic)
now sleeping in happy unconscious
ness of money and all its attendant
evils, each one of them worth their
weight in gold? I've heard you say
so many a time. Now at a moderate
estimate they will average fifty pounds
apiece. Even California gold is worth
two hundred dollars Il pound. so we
have two hundred and fifty pounds of
chcrubs at two hundred dollars a
pound, which, according to simple
! multiplication, makes seventy thous-
and dollars worth of those little hcav-
cnIy bodies alone"
"Nonscnsc, Pcrsy'--
"Oh! but it isn't nonsense. There
it is, figured out according to your own
estimate, and a pretty little sum it
makes to begin the world with. Now,
my dear, what is my love WORTH"
This was a poser. My wife looked
up in Il haze of blank astonishment as