, 1881-12-24

Most persons have heard Of the cele-
brsted encounter of o'Connell with the
famous scold Mrs Moriarty, the hukster Of
Dublin. There wAs At the time in Dub
lin certain woman, Biddy Moriarty, Who
had . hukster stand on one Of the quays,
nearly opposite the four courts She was
q virago Of the first order, very able with
her fists, and still more formidable with
her tongue. From one end of Dublin to
the other she was notorious for her power
of abuse, and even In the provinces Mrs.
Morir-ty's language had passed INTO cur
rency. 1t was mooted once that the
young Kerry barrister could encounter
| ber. and some Of the company (in OCon
ne.Ps presence) rather too freely ridiculed
the idea of his being able TO meet this
famous Madame Moriarsy. 0lConnell
never liked the idea of being put down,
and he proiessed his readiness tc eneoun-
ter her, and even backed himself for the
match. Bets we're Offered and taken-i
Was decided that the matter should come
off at once.
The party adjourned to the hukster s
stall, and there was the owner herself
experimenting the sale of her small wares
A few lawyers and ragged idlers were
hanging around her stall, for Biddy was
character" and her way was one OF the
sights of Dublin
O'Conneli commenced his attack:
whats the price of this walking stick,
Mrs What's your name 2
''Moriarty, sir, and good one it ir )
and what have you to sly agen it And
One and si1penco's the price Of the stick.
Troth, it's cheap as dirt, SO it is
"One and sixpence for walking stick
Phew Why you are no better than an
inposter to ask lS pence for what cost
you twopence.
'-Twopence your grandmother, replit |
Biddy. "Do you name to say it 3 chatin
the people am ; Imposter, indade!"
GAY, an imposter, and it's that | call
you to your teeth reioined OConnell-
"Come, cut your sticks, You cantanker-
ous jacknapes
"Keep civil tongue in your head, You
old diagonal" said 0'Connell, calmly.
"Stop your jaw, you pug -nosed bad
ger, or by this and that, cried Mrs. Mori
arty, "Tll MAKE you go quicker nor you
come"
"Don't be in passion my old radius
anger will only wrinkle your beauty"
"By the hooky, if you say another
word of impudence, III tan your dirty
hide, you bastely common scrub; and
sorry I'd be to soil my FISTS upon your
carcass"
"Whew boys, what passion old Bid
dy is in protest, as am gentleman-
"JintIeman Wisha, that bangs Ban
agher. Why, you potato-faced pippen
sneezer, where did Madagascar monkey
Ike you pick up enough OF common da-
'ency to hide yer Kerry brogueF
easy now-easy now," cried OCon-
nell, with imperturable good humor,
don't choke yourself with fine language,
you old whiskey-drinking parallelogram." "
"Whats that you call me, you murder
in villain !" -roared Mrs, Mariarty, stnns
to fury.
81 call you" answered OCcnnell, "a
parallelogram, and Dublin judge and jury
will say that it's no libel to call you 50.
"Oh,- ,-tare Al houns ch, holy Biddy |.
that an homes. woman Ike me should
be called a parrybellygrum to her face.
I'm none of your parrybellygrums, you
rascally gallows- bird; you cowardly,
sneaking, plate-licked blaggard "
"Oh, not you, indeed, rotorted oCon-
nell "why, suppose You will deny that
you keep hypothenuse your house
Its lie for you never had such
thing in my house, you swindlIng thafe. ,
"Why, sure all the neighbors know very
well that you keep not only hypothe-
muse, but that you have tTo diameters
| locked up in Your garnet, and that you go
out to walk with them every Sunday, you
heartless old hep.agon-
.Oh, hear that, ye SAINTS in glory, Oh,
there's bad language for fellow that
wants to pass for q iintleman' May the
dickens fly away wid ye, ye micher from
| Munster, and mako celery sauce Of yer
rotten limbs, ye mealy mOathed-'
"Ah, you can't deny the charge, you
miserable suhmultiplu Of duplicate ra-
to-"
s-Go rinse yer mouth IN the Llifey-
/ We nasty tickle-pitcher afther all the
hard words ye spske, il ought TO be filth
Ter, ye dirty chicken of Beelzebnb-
ssRinse your own mouth, you wicked
| minded old polygcn the deuce pitch
you, You clustering intersection of an OBJ
jectionable superfeies-
"You saucy tinker's apprentice, IL yon
don't cease your Jaw III
But there she gasped for breath, una
ble TO hawk no any more words, foE the
last volley of O'Csnnell nearly knocked
the wind out OF her.
sWhile I've tongue Ill abuse you,
YOU most inimitable periphery Look at
her, boys. There she stands, perpen-
dicular in petticoats. There's contanii-
nation in her circumference, and she
trembles with guilt down to the extreme
ties of her corollaries. All you're found
| ont. you retilineal antecedent and eaui-
angular old hag. It's with you the de-
mon will fly away. you porter wiping SIM
ilitude of the 5isecting Of a vortex
O.erwhelmsd with this sort Of Ian
guase, MoriArty was silsnced. Catching
no a saucepan, she was aiming at OCon-
nelIs head, when he very prudentiy maae
. timely retreat.
sSYou have won the wager, OConneh