The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1881-03-15


ports, such ludricous incidents are sur
passed by several which have happened
in the neighborhood Of Morcambe.
Some time ago the body of what was
supposed by the discoverer to be hui
man being was found ying on the
beach near the place above named,
having undoubtedly been left there by
the receding tide, The usual prepare
tons for holding an orthodox inquest
were put in force and kept going, until
the examination of a medical man
proved the suspected human corpse TO
be but the corpse Of Il monkey, which
had probably been thrown overheard
from some ship, and which SO closely
resembled in appearance a human be-
ing as TO require doctor to tell the diff
ference. Such a mistake looks either
like gross ilattery upon dead monk
ey or an unconscious satire upon hui
man nature, calculated to delight all
believers in the Darwnian Theory.
A not unnatural mistake was that
made by the policeman who arrested a
Dublin youth under what appeared to
be
SUSPICIOUS CIRCUMSTANCES.
The young gentleman referred to was
at a party in the Irish capital, and
joined with great spirit in game OF
forfeits Amid the fun and merriment
it was proposed that to regain his for
felt, he should pay visit to the turf
stacks on the adjacent canal bank and
bring some turf into the room. Think
ing only of the diversion that his re-
turn, with an armfu OF turf would Gre
ate, he Immediately FASTENED TO the
place indicated, Tiled his arms, and was
in the act of returning, when to his
horror he became aware that Il police
man was in pursuit, Almost para
lyzed with fright he dropped his bur
den and awaited the officers arriv-
al.
80, constable he stammercd, I've
been playing game of iorfeits, and
was told to bring some turf from the
canal into the house"
mot a bad story, but you'll have
to come with me- declared the con-
stable.
There had been continued complaints
of turf-pilfering, so, regardless of his
protestatons, the uulucky youth was
locked up for the night, The first in
timation his merrymaking friends re-
ceived of his whereai outs was when
next morning they heard that he had
been explaining the mistake 10 the
presiding magistrate, who fortunately
comprehended the case in II moment
and dismissed it.
A MISCONCErTION AS ITDICRoUs,
but in which the policeman figured less
creditahly than the one just referred to,
took place in the Isle of Man. At a
Deemster's court in Ramsay jew was
about to be sworn TO give evidence. As
Jews are always sworn on the Old Tes-
lament, and not the New, the Dcemster
requested the constable in attendance TO
fetch an Old one. After while that
worthy returned, and handed to the
witness an ancient-looking dilapidated
book, which, on being examined, proved
to be New Testament. The Deems
ter's attention being called to it, he
asked the constable why he had not
brought an Old Testament, to which
tho innocent reply was; please your
Honor, it was the Oldest one | could
find"
An amusing blunder was made once
by DYER who was given by "a farmer
four flannel shirts to be dyed fast gray
color, instead of which he dyed them
blue. On wearing the garments, the
color came out of them so that, as the
farmer curiously expressed it, she
look ed like red Indian" and as it cost
him several shillings in baths to turn
himself into white man again, he sued
the dyer and obtained damages
LUDICIOUs MISTAKE
is reported to have occurred at the
opening of bazaar in Glasgow, at which
the Princess Louise and the Marquis
of Lorne were present A distinguished
Clergyman was called upon by the
Chairman to conduct devotional exer-
cses and the reverend gentlemen had
commenced TO read, when four pipers
of Highland regiment, owing to some
misunderstanding, struck up with q
wild shrek on the bagpipes, by way of
preliminary TO "rhe Campbells are
NOlllUH. he IllHSlC was promptly
stopped; but the solemnity of the pro-
ceedngs had of course been shaken
An embarrassing incident, we are
told, once happened to an Englishman
in Rome. Entering one of the churches
in that city, rs u service was going on,
he sat quietly down, placing his hat on
the ground beside him. Some little
time passed, and as there seemed no
immediate prospect of the ceremony
coming to an end, he reached for his
hat, in order TO leave, but was stopped
by an unseen hand, which grasped from
behind. Thinking some custodian of
the church wished him TO remain till the
end of the service, he again waited but
his patience becoming exhausted, he
again reached for his hat, and again he
was prevented from going in the same
manner Convinced that the service
was some really important one, the
| Englishman once more delayed his
departure; but at the expiration of u
| quarter of an hour he determined to 90
in spite of etiquette, so he repeated the
same maneuver in the direction of his
head-covering, A third time the same
hand detained him; but as he deter
minedly resisted its grasp, voice be-
hind him exclaimed in English al beg
your pardon, but that is my hat you are