Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1881-10-06

| clObles.
Saint too big for your clothes, you
mean," said his wife, with a bitter
laugh. "To think that stuck-up Miss
Bassett, whose father used to peddle
soap. dared to turn up her nose at your
tailorin'i"
/ can that Miss Bisbee, who don't know
what good coat is when she sees one,"
cried the tailor, in the greatest exasper-
| alton, "a-settin' herself up to tell me
how much was to charged l guess I'll
learn her how to mind her own bust
ness" And 'Biah got up, and, sticking
| his big hands In his pockets, began to
stalk up and down the room in high
| dudgeon.
"Biah /" Mrs. Williams stopped
combing out her scanty locks, and, let
ting them string down each side of her
thin face, she eagerly faced her hus-
band. "Pll tell you what to do"
"What 2" asked her husband, stop
ping in surprise.
"You charge 'em just twice as much
as you would a DONE" said his wife,
peering through the two wisps of light
hair that hung dismally on either side
of her enraged countenance, can git
your pay out of 'em all an then you
give it back to the parson yourself,
when the coats done.
"Good for you cried her husband.
"Hain't you got IL head, though
And then he was SO delighted at her
cuteness that he lifted the two wisps
like pump handles, and kissed her.
Meantime, Miss Mirandy Stebbins,
feeling herself overreached in her effort
to be the prominent originator of the
gift to the parson, and defrauded as to
the supper she had counted so much
upon, was doing up her corkscrew curls,
in anything but sweet frame of mind,
preparatory to the sleep that wouldn't
come at her bidding.
cts outrageous f" she Kissed to her.
self, her false teeth being out, and care
fully placed on the bureau. 81 never
was so insulted in my life. That little
fat chunk of Miss Bisbee too. to do it
An Miss Highly to set by an see 'em,
an never say word I'll be up to
'em, | WILL"
Thereupon she blew out the candle,
and fiounced her thin frame down into
the middle of her feather bed, trying to
think of something bad enough to satisfy
her thirst for revenge. Suddenly she
sprang into sitting posture.
"pll git straight up now and write it
down, before l forgit it." she cried, in
great excitement, "for I never IL git it
into my head SO good again.
And, clambering out of bed, she
CROPPED around in the dark to light her
candle, when she proceeded to slip her
feet into some flannel slippers, and her
self into monstrous bed-gown of won
deSAll pattern.
There. now, what was it? Let me
see, she said, scratching her head with
the end of a rusty penholder that she
had with great difficulty found, after
mug rummaging, in the bureau drawer.
son, yes, that was it. Yes now, then"
The old pen scraped its way over the
small NANCY piece of paper that Miss
Mirandy considered suitable for the oc-
casion, until these words appeared
REVEREND MISTER BLoDGETT DEAR SIR. (On
second thoughts, considering the dear Sir
too familiar, she had, with extreme palms.
marked it over, while blush few over her
spare countenance and lighted up the dismal
bed-gown.)
REVEREND MISTER BLoDGETT. There bein'
an effort started afoot to buy you coat Iwish
10 state ont of profound respeck to yourself and
Ms. Blodgett an-here Miss NIirandy, finding
still quite a stock of respect left within her
bosom, concluded to bestow it literally so she
added, with extra flourishes-an your whole IN
elusive family that had the honor to propose
the coat, an should a had the extreme pleasure
OF presentin 1t in way suitable to the ocashun,
II that insidious creature Mis-. Seth Bisbee
hadn't insulted me at the SEWN society this
evenin at Mis-. Deacon Higbys. She started
all those ladies to talk awful about me, ehind
my back, when wasn't there; but Tom and
Joe Highly are noble lads an they've ben an
II III, -
in writin', an believe | would give for the
coat if I'd ben let to, an present my respecks to
Mis-. Blodgett an your eldest daughter an Sarah
Ann, an all the rest.
Yours to command,
MIRANDA STEBBINs
Miss Mirandy couldn't help reading
this over three or four times, she was
so delighted with it. Then she blew
ont the light and clambered into her
feathers again.
"On second thoughts" she said, as
she drew up the thick comfortable about
her spare chin, 81 won't send it now. /
can afford to wait, an when the coats
done III jest git 'Biah Williams to stick
it in one of the pockets. Thatll be
most as good as helpin' give it,: and,
hugely tickled at the turn of affairs, she
composed her mind and fell asleep.
On the first Sunday in December-a
bright, beautiful day-the "First
Church in Buzzville was crowded to its
utmost capacity. The presentation had
taken place the evening before, and con-
sisted in the coat being sent over by the
hands of the tailor's boy with note
containing the names of the fair donors.
All eyes and ears were therefore agog
to see the parson in his new habiIiments
and to hear how he returned thanks.
As he went up the broad aisle, every
neck was craned to catch sight of the
new coat, and many nudges and smiles
were given to express the general salts
faction that was bubbling over in the
audience.
After the first prayer, with few pre-
liminary hens" the parson stood up
end began to unburden his mind of the
deep debt of gratitude that seemed to
weigh him down.
Hem 1t gives me great pleasure, y
he mumbled then sought relief in his
handkerchief, which, being in The depths
| of his left-hand pocket, required
'strong pull and long pull to get it
| out. "nem i"
| Whiz-rustie-we some small white
| object out beneath the parsons hand up
| into the air then it settled slowly and
made its way down, down, toward the
| floor, when it futtered a moment, to
land in the second pew from the front,
| directly in Deacon Higby's lap. The two
| boys leaned past their mother to see the
sight, and almost laughed aloud. They
didn't laugh again for many day
The deacon heard the concluding
words of Parson BIodgett'1 acknowledge
| ment, who, now that he had his hand
kerchief, was all right; then he slowly
| unfolded the paper in his hand and ex.
| amined its contents.
Which done he turned and took long,
deliberate look at his two sons, who were
placidly observing the cratic movements
of belated fly on the ceiling.
Miss Mirandy Stebbins' letter, though
not in the way she had intended, finally
reached the minister's hand, and she
had full revenge; so also was the soul of
Bah Williams fully satisfied.
| But those " two noble lads the dea-
cons sons, had the jolliest whipping ever
known, and it wasn't safe to say " sew
ing society" to them for one good spell.
-Harper's Bdzar.
| Opposition.
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