Daily Republican., 1881-02-03
&ruA,vD srERRInxnr.
! Wild isms sy ,'ss Reilsws Of Inn
nit. sess.

! ru AlvD mEanlHssr.
witS |isms by .'se Fellows Of Inn
nit. Sost.
HOW A RET WAS WoH.
Az English Officer exchanged int
anoth her regiment carrie with him tn
reputation OF being ma rvslousiy su'
oesstul at . bet.
"Ab," said his new Colonel, "h
"won't get any success ont Of me, ~
warrant" and he wrote TO the fellow
former Colonel, an old friend; wv
like him very muoh."
"Glad You do, old boy Z; keep him
We found him too expensive q luxury,
vas the reply.
One day at mess the Colonel good
humorsdly ssid:
81 hear that you profess 70 siwayi
win bet :"
"Well, sir, I'm pretty successful tha'
way"
"I don't think yOu would be success
fol with me-"
"Msy trys" asked the subAtsrn.
"By all means"
"Well, then, / set you, sir, that that
old wound In your back has broken Ou'
afreeh -
"What In the world do you mean
Old wound in my backs D'you think
I ever turned my back on the enemy,
then :" and the gallsn: Colonel grew
warm. III never mad wound In nay
life. Jones'" to oornst, "lock the
door. III prove it to your own eyes. "
The other protested tina, the colonel q
staple word was more than enough.
Bot NO, the latter was excited, and
stripped.
"I've lost, SIR" and Brown handed
over the Gl0 note.
A few days later came q note from
the Colonel Of the other regiment
"Brown has again won pot Of money
out of US fellows. He bet heavily that
before he'd been with you month he'd
AXE you take your shirt of in the
mess room Gfler dinner, and now he
writes that he has succeeded"
That Colonel "ouss Sd"
SoURTIse II MIGHiGAB.
Thirty years ego Michigan people
were frank and truthful set. Siran.
GERS could come and trade horses with
their eyes shut, and breach Of promise
cases were unknown. Folks meant
what they said, and when they gave
their word they stuck TO II.
Kxactly thirty years ago this month
a vidower from New York State appear
cd In Lansing on business. That same
bus mess carried him over TO Dewitt,
eight miles away. While on tho way
he stopped at log farm house To warm
his cold fingers. he was warmly vel.
,omed by the pioneer and his wife. both
OF W hem were well along In wears, aud
after some general talk the woman
qneried:
sam right in thinning yeu are e
Gidowerf"
eyes"
"Did you come out here to find a
wifei"
"Partly."
"Dld any body tell you of our susiei"
mo"
"W.il we've got IS bouncing o girl
Of 22 as you ever SET eyes on. She's
good looking, healthy, and good.tsm-
peEsd, and I think she'll like your
ook."
"Where Is she'"
"Over In the woods. here, ohopping
low II q coon tree. Shall ! blow the
horn for herS"
"No. If you'll keep an eye on my
horse II! had her,"
"Weh, there's nothing stuck up
about Susie. She'll say YES or no as
soon as she looks you over. II you
W ant her don't b. afraid to say 3d."
The stranger heard the sound OF her
axe ahd followed it. He found her
ust as the tree was ready to tall. sh"
was q stout good-looking girl, swing
ing the axe like man, and in two.
minutes he had decided 10 say:
"6rsie I'm a wi1owsr from New York
I'm 80 years old, have one child,
own good farm, and l want vile.
viii on 20 back with me-"
She leaned on the axe and loo kei at
aim for half minute, aud then replied:
"Cau't say fOr certain. Just wait till
get these coons of my mind"
She sent the tree crushing To the
.srth, and with his help killed five
,oc ms, which were slowed away in
lO.lOw.
well what do you sayH" he asked,
as the last coon stopped kicking.
"Tm y1ur'n |" was the reply; "and
BY the tins you get back from Dewitt
IN havs these pslts of and tackled up
res dy fo' the preaoheil"
Ee returned to the houee, told the
,ld folks that he should. bring preach
4r back with him, and al dusk that
evening the twain were married
Hardly an hour had been wasted in
ami yet be took home one Of
he best girs in the State OF Michigan.
Free Press.
TWO BLUHDERs TN A STREET CAR.
An amusing incident occurred on a
Btreet-car the other day. A woman OF
ifty, made up to look about twenty
We years old, got aboard at crossing
0 find every seat Occupied. She stood
or q moment, and then selecting
, ,orly dressed man sbout forty five
ysars OF age, she observed: care there
10 gentlemen on this car 2" "Iudeed
dunno" be replied, as he looked up
Iad down. "If there hain't, and you
.re going clear through, I'll hunt ont
,p for you at the end of the line"
here wa an emf ar q Ing lsDcs for
moment, and then light broke On
lin all OF sudden, and he arose and
aid: you can have this seat, madam.
am allus perfectly willing to stand
lp and give my seat to any body older
nan myself" That decided her. She
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