The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883, 1881-06-30
Wm legsrf.

The hardest kind of chasm to get
over-sarcasm.
Electricity in Franklin's time was a
w ,nder; now we make light OF it.
Crockery dealers always delight in
seeing other people do a smashing
business.
Yonng ladies are forming archery
clubs for the purpose of drawing the
bows.
az find that with light meals my
health improves" said the Esquimaux;
and down went another candle.
The woman who marries does well.
lint the woman who does not marry
does better nine times out OF ten.
A fascinating young lady at a party.
was asked if she ever read Shakespeare !?
"Of course / have. l read that when
il first came out"
Sitting Bulls daughter is named
Sleeping Water. She is evidently no
relation to the water that Chicago peo.
pie are drinking just now.
A little Lowell boy has discovered
why Adam and Eve were never babies.
IT was never because there was nobody
to take care of them.
An Irishman who had or n very rag
py coat was asked of what stuff it was
made. "Bedad, I don't know / think
the most of it was made of fresh air"
This is his first season on a farm. and
he has planted ten acres with tomato
cans. He expects the ground will pro-
duce q heavy crop of canned tomatoes.
Six million people in this country
have bilious attacks in the spring, just
about the time a man car do the best
of work with q rake in the back dool
yard.
In the counting room of a Galveston
freshman, the following notice is up
"Persons having no business in this
office will get through with it as oon as
possible and ~leave.'
eyes" said Pendleton. s%wellingly,
''what I am ] can truly say that my
wife made me-" "Not very compliment
tary to Mrs. Perdleton," remarked
Blunt, IN a stage whisper.
Mother Shipton has strapped on her
liver pad, bought a set of ten dollar
teeth, a row of bangs and a bottle OF
"bloom of YOUTH" and has concluded
to live down her prophecies.
Some men will act unscrupulously to
get wealth. A Chicago man invented
-. kloA would y,oEa aUpn tho
most homeliest woman look pretty. and
purchasers invariably select one of his
mirrors as the best.
A sleeper is one who sleeps ; a sleeper
is also q place where q sleeper can
sleep: and a sleeper is. too, a thing
over which runs the sleeper in which
the sleeper sleeps; so that the sleeper
in the sleeper sleeps. while the sleeper
runs on. as we'll as sometimes leaps of
the track.
1t was their first night aboard
the steamer. cat last" he said tenderly,
1--WE are all one, ont upon the deep
waters of the dark blue sea, and your
heart will always beat for me as it has
beat in the past?" "Ny hearts all
rlgnt, Sne answered IauBuluiy, Jul
my stomach feels awful"
An Englishman at a hotel in New
York asked the clerk if there were
"oysters in the hotel" ooh yes" was
the reply step right into the restan-
rant; we don't keep them in the office
"Egad?" said Mr.. John Bull, "I think
you misunderstood me. you know ]
mean an oyster don't You know
'lift'-a hellevator, may be you call il
in this country"
The average clerk is rather fast and
lives ND to his income. A few days age
n merchant on Galveston Avenue, on
looking over the books TUNED over to
the book-keeper and said 81 think we
had better discharge young McSmith-
err" "Whv. he is one of the most POI
lite and efficient clerks we have!' 81
know, but there must be something
wrong about him. He never overdraws
his account, and / never knew a clerk
to do that before. There is something
mysterious about that young man. He
will do to watch.