Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-04-24
P1TH AND POINT.
Whom did jack-knife

Whom did jack-knife
WHAT was it the stage-struck?
A CIRCUS is ring-ridden institution.
Is A hot fat-iron in bed sheet
anchor?
PRIDE goeth before fall and behind
dollar.
WHAT kind Of money is coined In
peppermint?
A POPULAR flower with fortune hun
ers-Marigold. 7.
A FRIEND is DESTROYS of knowing what
did the monkey wrench?
MIR. BURNAND, of London, edits
Punch with care"
TALK is cheap, but it takes money to
win the good-looking girl.
ENGLISH students are great gour-
mands. At one college they are always
Elton.
The man who Rhode Island Nevada
done it if he hadn't put faith in Provi-
dence.
Poems and articles which arc "dashed
off in twenty minutes or 80 are usually
baIderdash.
. THE leader of Chicago orchestra fell
down stairs and smashed his fiddle.
He wasn't much hurt himself although
he fell so violintly.
INaERsoLL says "Treat woman like
splendid flower" Well, men gen
orally do, Colonel. That is, they find
it much easier to beg them than raise
them.
81 NEVER argy agin a success" said
Artemus Ward. "When I see rattle
snaix's he'd sticking out ov hole, I bear
off to the left and say to myself, that
hole belongs to that snaix."
AN exuberant youth halls supposed
acquaintance on the street with, "Hello.
Joe,' but, finding his mistake, adds,
"Oh, excuse me, thought you were
another MANI Laconic stranger an
swers, 81 am"
AN old sportsman says that those who
shoot must care less for game suppers.
Out Of seven good hunters three said
that they never ate game, and four said
that, while it was good enough, it could
not compare with oysters, beefsteak,
mushrooms, or "seven-up."
"IT is easy to see," said the teacher
to his pupil, " thatyou don't understand
the subject" every likely" returned
/ the pupil, "father told me only last
week that he didn't think it worth while
| to pay for the services of such an in
| structor."
s'PA, do they make cannons as they
do glass bottles % Certainly not. Why
| do you ask such question ?" swell,
| then, why does the paper say the wind
blows great guns?'' And then the old
man caught the youngster by the neck
and breeched him.-Has0&-Eye.
THE lament of the ofice-seeker's wife:
I've letter from my dad, e rr.
Baby mine, baby mine.
He is feeling awful bad,
Baby nine baby NINE ~ i4
For the 'sp,ace " he didn't get,
BE is coming back, my pet, r
And he'll stay at bone, you bet,
Baby NINE
| Col. SNIvENs felt complimented when
| he was told that he had heart of oak
but when the simile was carried further,
ana he was assured that his head was of
the same material, somehow or other he
! didn't feel complimented, but was under
the impression that he was called wood.
I en- headed.
| ONE young countryman said to an
| other, as they were promenading Broad
! way, "What do you suppose is the rea-
| son that all these dandies walk with
their elbows sticking out?" To which
his friend replied 81 suppose it's
cause they used to carry parcels when
they were errand boys"
| Two FRIENDS, just married, were dis
| cussingrapturouslya as they congratulated
| each other on the merits and charms of
their spouses. Said one, my wife has
| got the loveliest head of hair ever cav,
even on the hair-renovator labels; when
she let's her hair down, the ends fall to
the floor" "That's nothing" replied
! the other: "when my wife lets her hair
! down, it all falls to the floor"
CURIosrTY-"I would like to know
very mooch, +" remarked Nose Schom-
burg to Gilhooly, "if my brudder Sam
| wash an honest man." "IIl tell you
! how to find out if he is honest or not,
responded Gilhooly. -"Next time you
| go off on the train take him along to the
depot, and, just before the train leaves,
give him $40 bill and tell him to
change it. IF he comes back with the
change, then he is presumably honest"
"But ven he don't come packP" "Then
you lose your So" "Shimminy gra-
| shus It'd you suppose for a moment,
Mishter Gilhooly, dot I wash completely
| eaten up NIT curloshity ?"