Connecticut western news., 1881-08-24
THE LIME.KILN CLUB.
Som New Proverbs-The Whipping
 POst-Sunstroke.

Il wouldn't gin cent fur de man who quotes old proverbs an adopts second-han' mottoes," began the old man as the crunching of harvest apples suddenly ceased. "Dis am an aige fur eoery man to hold his own blow, an who am content to let some one else hold it must be satisfied wid cobs Tn place of con. Et 1 was so poo an low-down dat l had to pick rags would have my own maxlms an notices. Instead of sayin' 'Doan' put off till to-morrer what kin be dun to-day, would have it: Now, ole man, you git right up n dust an sling mo rags dis week dan any odder chap kin in a month"; De odder day I met Comeback Jones. You know he am bout sixty vars old, an bout as hard up as woodchuck in bars grip. l axed de old man how he was keepi n up wld do purcheshun, an he replied Wall, Ize mighty hard up, but dey say 1t am long lane dat has no turn Jist fink of an ole man wid one No. IS in de grave waitin' fur turn in de lane to bring him heaps to eat an lots to war All frew life he has carried dat second han ..sayin' wid him, an am yet be- liever in it. Why didn't he have one of his own? If he had said, forty years ago: 'Doan foller any lane, but cut cross-lots,' de wolf wouldn't be arter him to-day. A man who has de will to make motto has de pluck to make it a success. Buckle down to bizness,' am better motto dan any book kin give ye. Let me, in closin' quote some of de notices an maxims belonging to members of d1s club:
 " Sir Isaac Walpole-'DoaD drap fifty cents 'reachin' fur dollar
 "Waydown Bebee-'When ye can't dig frew wall climb over it.
 "Giveadam Jones-'Git dar' if it takes leg.'
 "Pickles Smith-'Ye can't swim 8 ribber by sittin' on bank
 "Samuel Shine-'Sot yer alarm clock fur six in de mornin'.'
 "Trustee Pullback-'If de road am up hill stiffen yer back bone little mo- ,
 "Kyan Johnson-'De man who wars his hat on his ear shows de empty side of his head
 "Brutus Jackson-'Hoe con wid yer hans and arms stead of yer mouf.'
 "Elder Toots-'Take a job at first sight, but doan' trade hosses till ye fink it ober. ,"
 The following open letter was then read
 LAFAYETTE, Ind, Aug. 3, '91.
 BRO. GARDNER-Did you, some seven or eight weeks since, advocate the es- tablishment of the whipping post for petty ofenses? Please give me direct answer, in order to decide a wager.
 Very truly, SOLOMON WHITE.
 "I did" said the old man as he arose, "an' do now, an I shell in de fuchur, onless de need of it passes away, In de fust place, does it degrade man any mo to warm him up wid raw-hide dan it does to put him in jail or sot him to poundin' stone on de street? In de nex' place, kin mean man be degrad- ed? In de las place, we am all awar' dat not one petty offense in five am punished, bekase de law doan' tech it, or bekase it's too much expense and trouble to prosecute. Sartin pussons make bizness of loafn'. How many of 'em kin you convict of vagrancy Sartln pussons insult lone women on de street. How many of 'em have eber been jailed? Oar am dozen oder lenses dat de law doan' tackle, or if it does de lenders git cl'ar. What punish ment am it to loafer to go to jail for a month ? He gifts plenty to eat an a good bed to sleep on, an gains five pounds of fat If dat same man was tied up an thirty lashes laid agin his bar back, he'd open his eyes pow'rful wide. Go on de ribber-go on de kyars walk on de streets, an you fin de loafer. He pushes an crowds an abuses an insults. What kin you do wid him Make complaint an de law will play wid him an let him go. Let an officer give hum soun' foggin' an his hat would come down off his ear in no time. De whippin'-post may be barbarous, but what do ye call it when loafer follers your wife frew de streets ? It may be degradin', but what do ye call it when three drunken loafers take possesshun of 'scurshun boat and knock men down an frighten women half to death? Take 8 tramp, 8 loafer, a drunkard or petty thief, tie him to whippin'-pos an play a raw-hide on his back fur five minutes an you hev done mo- to make dat man respect de power of de law an de rights of odder men dan any work house sen- tence could do."
 The Committee on Sanitary reported as follows on cases of sunstroke
 1. As soon as de sun knocks him down crowd aroun' an ax him if he am able to walk fo' miles to de hospital.
 2. Feel in his pockets to see if he am luggin' an internal masheen aroun'.
 3. Steal his hat.
 4. Take upa colleckshun to buy a two cent fan an glass of water.
 5. Call fur some one to boss de job.
 6. Pour de water ober de patient an rub him wid de glass, an take all bets of three to one that he won't rally-Detroit Free Press.
 Those Cigarettes.
 The statistics of cigarettes show how their use in this country has grown of | Iata Tn ona veer tho supn1v has in.