Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1881-03-14

Burdette in Burlington Hawkeye.l
n I- I--


Fairly in the road, a man came and
sat down in front Of me and turned
around and faced me:-
Gold this mornin' ?" he said.
| folded my Enquirer wherein | had
been enjoying C~risswell, and famed
myself vigorously with it a moment
or two before | replied. Then | I'M
buttOned my coat ("private to editors"
1t was originally a three buttoned
coat; but the exigencies of the season,
the long absence from home, and the
necessity of dropping in the contribu-
ton basket every time go to church
has reduced it to the minimum Of
one), wiped my frigid brow with my
handkerchief, and said in painting
tones:
II don't find it So"
The man looked astonished. But
presently he said
Maybe you've been runnin2"
mo" | replied; II have been
asleep for the past two hours in a
sleigh"
"And ye didn't feel cold?" the man
inquired.
"Manl"I said, in tones of amaze
ment, cold, on the 9th Of June?"
"Junel'' he echoed Strengthening
up, are you crazy? It's the 9th Of
january"
well" I said, ut felt like the 9th
of June to me-"
Its mighty fine sleighing, all the
same" the nan said.
| told him without a blush that l
had never seer the mud worse
on Ohio roads since | could remem-
Der.
where on earth" he asked in
utter astonishment, 'did you come
from2"
Dayton" l said.
His eyes began to creep out and
look at each other over the top of his
nose.
"When?" he asked.
This morning" l said calmly,
"since 8 o'clock"
"How?" he fairly shouted.
I'm a one-horse sleigh" | said.
"Sakes alive!" he shrieked, "it is
impossible. It's only eleven o'clock
now, and Dayton is ffty-6ve miles
awayl"
"Uouldn't help it," l insisted; 81
left there a little wei two hours ago
in a sleigh, had a poor horse, drove
slowly, and the mud was up to the
hubs Of the wheels all the way, 1t
was as warm as Msy, and l hadn't
seen enough snow to make q One-boy
slide in 5000 miles
The mans hair stood on end, and he
got up to start off for the other end of
the car.
If you amt crazy, aud l believe
you he" he said, with a grave earnest
ness, you are an awful liar"
Good man." l said. II expect |
am, but | am not a fool. | may tell
startling lies, but / do not talk like an
ass and | would be thought a liar or
a maniac rather than an imbecile. |
do not come into a car where the
thermometer marks three degrees be-
low zero and tell a living, breathing,
intelligent, sensitive mar that it is
cold, just as though | was imparting
some information to him. | do not
watch him drive up to the train in a
sleigh, spinning over the dry. crisp
snow, on the smooth, perfect pixies Of
Ohio, and then attempt to instruct,
amuse or %startle him by telling him
the sleighing is good. | would rather
astonish him than bore him. fl had
nothing better to tell him than some
thing he knows already far better than
| do, my mouth is sealed, aud | will
never speak. Ia order to astonish
him or startle him | may have to lie
to him; but that is better than
boring him. You might as we'll sit
down and tell me that twice two
is four as to tell me that it is cold
You might as well tell me that
George Washington is dead as to tell
me the sleighing is good. Go away,
good man, go to sleep. ! tell YOU it Ia
June; there is no snow, there is dust,
and there are roses. It is 200 miles
from Dayton to Loyeland, and [
walked from the north pole this morn
ing. Go get thee to q nunnery, and
when you can model your converse
ton on something besides the United
States signal service reports, come and
wake me up andhold me in the match
less charms Of your instructive talk.
| know not what course others will
take; put as for me, gaul blast the man
who talks to me about the weather"
And straightwsy the man ariz and
got him unto the after wood box, for
he was sore astonished, And as / fell
into a slumber, the forgotten dreams
of which contained more real. valu-
able information than that man ever
did or ever will know, 1 heard him
opening q conversation with a t%aciturn
brakeman by remarking:
Gold this mOrnin'2"