The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-03-08
FUNNY ISIMS

"A state Of unirsss-Nud. J-rsey-Can or,ds.
Tribune
An ore. are 10 . CRATE comsors.-yonksr,
Statesman
An ante rooms gambling saloon Elevated
Philadelphia has coal dealer named Steele
Suggestive bausi
An oii not e,'rulatoi to eoo,hs-Tarmci'.-
Csmn ridge Tribune.
-, es.r talk, mighty 'oud wen il gifts loose
FUN d. Jug -Cncle R~mus.
food plsc- tor g'isrrel-oIns couple s-wrsnx.
lant.-SIm.rviIle Journal.
Save up your ,ce: You'll want it next sum.
mer.-syrscuse Sunday T'me-.
Every young isty otter have . sssI skin
ssceu- --Sy rAruse Sunday Times.
Showing resr~ct to oil axs-.miins ut
simsnse Iokss--we-xiy Gate city-
An fni,sn. ur'Ik. . i'm hourishss oe., with
his hstchet wh-n he isn't setting.
Why nos move the White House into Ohio
so as TO have 10 81 homo '-kokomo Tribune.
-Hos.,.hsr s,nans urlass Vennor'- name
~ biovn on the pottie--'Gi City D~rr,ck-
EARLY SETTLERS ~ show ar- apt On get res-rv-
cd s-.'s on the fron;-,er. Mc6rsgor News.
An old o.. captain says tha; he ,.o-.,r love
his>srfe when -he throws her rsncor ~ him.
-Tnass light A. hair .ometi nee turn the -ho,s
course Of . insn's appetIt~.-Yonksrs gazette.
-fl,ys NAV possibly ~ to the happy land ct
eA''ne. oa: cats . to purr-di'ion.-Erra,ic
Eurqus.
-How's your coal bin ,-Exchanae. Our coal.
been cut several Gmss this wiuter.-uutch ess
Farmer.
With SIGH. '.time - money. "-H srtfori sunday
Jeurnsl.
lyon horrid thing, Utah my drc.. ~ - the
Mormon belle sad vhsn Ter escort stepped On
her train.
WHOM there Is. storm IN tn. nursery.
IN ysin--CAmbridg- Tribune
Why 10 . MOSQUITO like . locomotive -
EIrhSnge. Because thSy both travel over
sieepsrs.- foekers Gazette.
"A Sioux brave 70 called Castillo sosp. The ap-
pe.ist,oa iss mi.uomer. He "won't wash
Sosristown Herald.
"A rural Clergyman put ,his .,sn II hrs
window: TO wrio~~ anil wliowers-Repairinx
done h~re"-Boston Times.
Freezing polIten~ss-telline the man who he
fallen on the ssipP~ry pavement that II he will
CONF to you ycuwiii pick him up.
Bleak House. wa. PLAYED in Keokuk lately
Tho .'nov-s vss '.hiask' enough 10 satisfy the
moot NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Gate City.
On Pristsy is.s, vnen = policeman made an
Arrest, h couldn't make his prisnne. walk, he
'i-s hun ,iii~. -Sorristown Herald
The only way to settle tine color question nj
West Point - for the court marshal to white
wash whi,tsk-r.-Eie,atei Railway Journal.
There IL desrsh nj ".msrt sayings" Of
children IN tie newspapers - the man who used
to manufacture IN IN dead '-New YORK Mail
-Far,l,sr,sv breeds contempt. The reason
sorne men have NO ssr for music 10 because they
have base drum IN that oryAn.-Yonkers States
man.
Type 10 not m. only thing about q PRINTING
oflise that 10 bold fsrei--S.emS sunbeam 'sh
don't give y"ars~if .wAy--hsckensaek Republic
~an-
There - sown in Ohio ca,l~.i Gore. 7; must
~ bu'ty place for hsood - stsrher vile Herald.
IL seams that dressmakers ought to thrive
snsre-
1T Sas ess-rtai thu: vannor ~ one tins Vas
. plumber. We'll, he's not the on,v plumber
that makes . good weather prohs.-Yonkers
Sta esmSn-
An 1o~s hen kills rs,tie.nske.; the Nev
Haven REGISTER thinks she hal better tick to
her .ss.iimst~ bs in~.~ OF laying Eggs at pressnt
prsces--oIt Civ Derrick
-B.-,ou h~s .s,s ;i>haa an .'Institute Of
He sis:y." G.. tdr-p who wish TO BE- horn INTO
poor. bnt dis iuguished, fsniii,es. should apply
sariy.-S -. Pesyun~.
lore the Gun tu, thea mas are very apt 10 10
that. for "a taxes fully that long o. ges the son
Waksd up.-Phlsls IphiS News.
-"You'v. got ;h~ eigs on me-" - the razor
ssid to the hsrh.r.-K-okak Constitution. "ye..
and did 70 9th my ho,e l~hrr ant ingenuitv,"
aid the hsFb~P 10 the 1or.-Steuienvil Herald
And ao~ comes tss n.ws tHas PearsylvanIa
man va frJ1~n to death whi. si~sShinx With hrs
e'ri: but ur tn the hour of going TO pres no
iroseL erie have bsen rvported.-siiddieson
Transcript
-OvrHe 10 the large nee crop. IT vi;l b % cheap
next summer that " wil har.iiy paw hoys to seal
"a from thS carse- Thus doth Psovidsuce make
In,epss cold hen~as mackind. -Phiadel phis
Rev. T. ?. Jeu~e, Of Norwich. preached ~.
TENT eyen,ns On the suiiscs. '-wh~n. snd how to
rourt-" We imagine the sr.stsP part Of his au.
t,ence could give ne r-sersnd espoundsr many