Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1881-07-08
IN A NUTSHELL.

pi of it.
One way to make money is to take a
half-pound trout, fill it up with shot
and then go and bet it weighs a pound
and a half.
Mayor Kalloch says he has come to
the eastern states for fun and pleasure.
He always did have taste for those
things.
She cooed; he wooed; the old man
said they could if they would. Nc
cards.
The duke of Albany gives most agree
able dinners III his suite of apartments
in Buckingham palace to literary and
artistic friends.
! Louisiana sportsmen amuse them
selves and test their skill by bat-shoot-
ing matches, the winged mammals tax
ing the place of pigeons.
They were speaking Of miser. lust
deceased. "Did he leave anything ?,
asked Smith. He had to-" was the
laconic answer of Fogg. Boston Tran
script
A young lady graduate may in after
years forget the title of her essay, but
she will always remember how her
white dress was made aud trimmed.
A fashion item says: "a polonaise
for dinner is cut square" We want no
polonaise for dinner, no matter how il
Is cut. We'd just as soon eat y prin
cess Cyerskirt on toast.
Papa, they don't have any stone in
Ireland, do they?" asked little boy
the other day. YES, my boy; but
why do you ask such question 81
Because thought it was all sham
rock over there"
The lumber resources of Washington
Territory are very great. The average
size of the fullgrown fir is six feet In
diameter, while many of the trees are
500 feet high, and one tree alone has
produced 10000 feet of lumber
First Swell: "Does it seriously make
no difference to you whether or not
you have thirteen at a tablet" Second
Swell: "Why, yes, all the difference
in the world, especially if there is only
enough on the table for twelve"
THE international pigeon race was
flown on Saturday from different parts
vi Vic CHlitO pbdltS Stilll NtIltttld, TIE
distance to their homes being 250
miles; the winners made that distance
at the rate of mile in two minutes.
The public has lost its interest in the
Christiancy scandal, but the litigants
and lawyers are still at work. Counsel
for the defense proposes TO rip-up "
the statesman's character, and show
that he has been bad man both i'll
this country and in Peru
Rubbersoled shoes for bicycle riders
are now made Bicycle hats may soon
be expected They will be large
enough to carry II feather pillow in the
crown. When these are followed by
hairmattress overcoats bicycling will
be comparatively safe.
A young man who had begun telling
a spinster what kind of tea he liked
best, said. 81 have loved Oo-long" "
The maiden turned scarlet and de-
clared that she would not be made the
subject of puns at this age Of life.
Just now the women load thei,
dresses down with beads Next year it
may be the fashion to wear from thirty
to eighty eow-bells. Nothing is too ro-
mantle for woman to adopt.
| Black walnut timber is becoming 50
scarce at the west that furniture manu-
facturers are experiencing much trou-
bic. There Is great competition to Oh
tain supplies, and the price has adj
vanced $12 thousand during the past
year.
A Rational Dress Society "has been
formed in London, the object of which
is to promote independence in select
: ing costumes, according to the taste
and convenience of individuals, with
out regard to prevailing fashions.
The house fly can only be seen dis
tance of thirty eight feet. but that
never bothers him any. He always
manages to keep within thirty.seven
feet of everything.-Detroit Free Press.
The paymaster of the Cincinnati
Southern railroad systematically held
back the employees wages, and then
lent them money on his own account at
usurious interest. But the business
did not pay, for it caused him to lose
his place.
Tommy went fishing the other day
without permission of his mother.
Next morning a neighbor's son met
him, and asked: "Did you catch any
thing yesterday, Tommy" Not till /
got home" was the rather sad response.
A political economist found poor
fellow who had been arrained for steal
ing sheep, and looking at him with a
pitiiul glance said philosophically,
"You ought to have known that TO de.
liberately steal sheep is great crime
which there is no earthly necessity to
perpetrate Why didn't you buy the
sheep and not pay for it? That would
have simplifed matters and saved you
from prison"
4 landlady went to market as usual
one morning and encountered the new
clerk, an Irishman, who had been rec
commended for his intelligence in max
ing hargains. GLOW are eggs today
Scarce, mum, but betther than iver .
Il mean how much are they dozen.
Fifty cents" said Pat, tanning him
self with bunch of radishes. Fifty
cents, why ! can get them anywhere
for twentw- five cents" "Its wrong We
are there, num-" mildly demonstrated
the insinuating MIlesian; "thim's phal
we call extra eggs. There brace o.
foine chickens in livery wan o. thim"
A quick answer is like the sharp cut
Of whip. "You are no gentleman,
sir" said an irate individual to the per-
son next to him. care you a gentle
man YOURSELF" was the sneering inqui.
ry. 81 am, sir" was the reply, in a
tone which implied duel if any doubt
was expressed. ''rhen you are quite
right in saying that am not one" re-
torted the party of the second part,
neither do / wish to become one"
| Queen Victoria has a true feminine
love for pretty things" So greatly
old she admire Lady Brooke's DAISY
Maynard's} wedding gown that she in
sisted upon her young landship's din
| ing in it at Windsor Castle; and after
dinner the Queen made the pretty
bride "walk about" that she MIGHT