Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1881-03-23
CURRENT NOTES.


Can man intoxicated by music be said
to be air. tight?
The brilliant scarlet of the English army
uniforms is known as " England's bloody
red"
There is no fish in the world that will
increase in weight like trout after it has
been pulled from the water. :
The thrifty man will always put some.
thing away for a rainy day, even if it is
nothing but stolen umbrella.
An exchange says that dolls modelled
after Sara Bernhardt are being imported.
They can also be used for crochet needles.
1t is new thing that Providence,
Springfield and Lynn, in New England,
are rejoicing in public exhibitions of paint
ings.
The latest theory is that the North Pole
is the original cradle of the Aryan race
that enterprising race to which the most
of US belong.
DIR. Schhemann, the explorer, believes
in signs, dreams, and warnings and ancient
history. His wife is very careful not to
drop the dishcloth.
A distinguished Frenchman observes that
the Greeks are not lucky; whether they
offer or decline assistance, people are
equally distrustful of them.
The angel of midnight-the woman who
opens the street door for her husband
when he is trying to unlock the bell-knob,
and then let's him sleep on the hall floor.
A plot that most of Erin's peasantry
would gladly own to is plot of land en-.
tirely to himself. He'd have no other con.
spirators engaged on such plot as that.
Riches may "take wings" as the
proverb says. But men in all conditions
of life are anxious and eager to secure the
riches, and take the chances on the wings
A Dedham minister asked one of his
parishioners if she was "a mother in Is
rael," to which she responded sob,
land sakes, no. l have never been mar
ried !"
Striped stockings are no longer fashion
first families on wash days will not re-
semble a collection of the flags of all
nations.
An Ohio girl sued a man for breach of
promise, and proved him such mean
scoundrel that the jury decided that she
ought to pay him something for not marry
ing her.
A Boston doctor advertises for a wife
who, among other qualifications, must
have less brains than the advertiser.
Should think he would have great difficulty
IN finding such a woman. II Norristown
Herald.
Punshon, the famous London preacher,
is very ill. Somebody got off a bad pun in
hispresence. 4 Philadelphia Evening News.
You are mistaken. He is suffering from
the effects of punch on the brain. Il Norris
town Register.
A woman will work month to fabricate
delicate protection for chair, and then
when it is in place an edict is promptly
issued forbidding any man sitting in that
chair, through fear OF spelling the tidy.
It's the best chair protector that possibly
could be desired. II Rockland Courier.
A well-to-do farmer strobe into jewelry
store at Muncie few days ago, and paid
for ring he confessed to have stolen of the
proprietor fifteen years ago. He said he
had "been in hell " ever SINCE If it took
fifteen years of it to goad man up to pay
ing for that ring, it can't be such bad
place as it has been made out Boston
Post.
They had just been married. He seized
her hand and said, in low, tremulous
voice: g It was your innate modesty and
apparent indifference, dearest Sallie, that
made me register VOW to marry you at
all hazards" Eyes" she sighed, 81 but l
slipped up on three or four of the most
eligible young men in Galveston before /
found that out. ;"
A married gentleman, every time he met
the father of his wife, complained to him of
the temper and disposition of his daughter.
At last, upon one occasion, the old gentle
man, becoming weary of the grumbling of
his son-in-law, exclaimed, s You are right !;
she is an impetuous jade, and if I hear any
more complaints of her I will disinherit
her. The husband made no more com.
plants.
She was young and beautiful; he was
old and ugly. He took her hand and
squeezed it tenderly, and then she put out
her tongue at him. Then he laid his band
gently on her breast. She was Is and he
was 20, but still it was affection of the
heart. o, yes, it was. Her heart was
affected, and he was a doctor, trying to see
how far the mischief had gone-[ London
Referee.
Coal ia scarce in Chicago, and the Inter-
Ocean declares that "the man who tackles
and solves the problem of cheap fuel will
be entitled to monument, and he cannot
come forward with his discovery any too
SOON" Let the Government control the
trunk lines. Bring on your monuments.
n. B.-Put an angel on top with pen in
ore hand and pair OF scissors in the other.
[ Philadelphia News.