The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1881-03-31
EXPLOITS OF THE SOCIETY NAN.
A New Hand ut the Bellows ON the BreskIyr
Eagle Who Wants TO Come Ilsne.
The Brooklyn Eagle tells it thus:

well, how did you get along at the party,
last night = asked tho city editor, of n new re-
porter, whom he had engaged the day before,
and whom he had sent to write up social occa-
sion:
mot very vel, y responded the new reporter,
gloOmily. Il don't think Brooklyn society is
the top notch racket, anyhow
"Whats the matter !" demanded the city edi-
| tor. 'Didn't they use you well I"
81 can't say they did, "rejoined the new report
er. Now, 1 went up there, last night and
waded right into the fun. Iasked for the chair
man of the party, and told him we were LAYING
out to swell their heads in to-day's issue, and he
had better skip in and introduce me TO some of
the high bugs, if he calculated to have his name
mentioned in the report
'What did he say to that !" asked the city ed
itor, with a calm CLEAN in his eye
'He wanted to know who sent me- told
him the main guy of this literary bank had fired
NE in there, and that when I'd got through
shaking leg, I'd like some facts about the lay
out. If he couldn't give 'em, l told him, he'd
better get the Secretary TO heel up pretty lively
| or I'd give the whole outfit a deal in the paper
that would make him think every hair on his
head band of music, and all playing different
| tunes"
"And what did he say to that ~ inquired the
city editor, the CLEAN deepening omnously
| "Oh, he said he was a friend TO the Eagte and
would do what he could for me. told him he'd
better hop right at it, and first wanted to meet
the gals If he calculated to hold the friend
ship of the Eagle, said, he didn't want to waste
much funny business, before he had me bump
ing around in the may. He said if I'd 20 M
stairs, and take off my hat and oyereoat, he'd
see me later"
"Did you do it p asked the city editor, in a
constrained tone.
mo. l said wanted some grub, first So he
| took me down into the front kitchen and asked
me if liked boned turkey. / told him I'd take
leg, and some of the breast. What do Won
think he gave me Head eheesc If he didn't
| you can lick me. l conldn't eat that and so
asked him for glass of beer, and cheese sand
wicl He said he had some wine, and 80
drank bottle, and put couple in my pockets
what did you do then r. Intercepted the city
editor, lingering length of gas pipe.
II went up TO the parlOr, and he said I'd bet
ter take description of the scene, before /
danced, and gave me the names. Here they are
Mary Monroe, red frock, with white sack, and
hair punched; Emma Latrobe, yellow dress and
| high-heeled slippers; Marion Willoughby, some
kind of thin stun, white, and tied up with blue
tape, her hair frizzled; Jenny Murchison. black
clothes, and n feather in her hair; Ella Wexford,
yellow hair, and n gray suit, Hat in front and
stuck out behind Pauline Tresley-I tell You.
| boss, she was daisy; bigger'n a tub, and
dressed To the top branch. She had on u velvet
outfit mile long, and sixteen rows of teeth on
her gloves. Her hair was dead yellow, tied
| up like bun, and had a lot of vegetables in it.
| Florence Ross, green dress, tipped with velvet,
and hOisted up ut the side with white check
/ rein. Winnie Hamnersiy, white net work. with
red streaks, walked with limp, and hair fres-
coed. That's all | got. There was lot of old
pelicans there, but knew you didn't care for
them; and as for the men, told 'em it would
cost 'em dollar apiece to get in, and rs they
| wouldn't put up. showed 'em. / can state that
they were a cheap lot, who don't know any
more about society than fig does of politics,
and thatll teach em a lesson, and say we'd
better give the Chairman a rub. He didn't iu-
| troduce me to a solitary hen. Better say that
he hasn't paid his gas bill for seven months, and
| that day before yesterday his accounts were
| found short. What do You thinkfr
| Got any more about the party I" demanded
| the city editor, rising slowly.
Nothing, only that the grub wasn't fit to eat,
though furnished 10y that popular caterer, Mr.
| Thaphagener. told him I'd give him puff
\ iou might say, too, that the whole party was a
| dead failure, on account of the vilanous treat
ment to which our new society reporter was sub
jeeted, when he asked for a handful of cigars
Say, what have you got for me TO do, tonight p
Not thngr' yelled the city editor, as he
! brought the gas pipe across the new reporters
ear. "iOu Internal reptile! don't you know that
WAS one of the best houses in the town. and the
! affair the finest of the season. r.
I'm going back to st. joe" groaned the new
reporter, as he fell down stairs. If that's
Brooklyn society, I'm going where they have
some STYLE and he struck off toward the West,
largely afoOt.