Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1881-11-06
THE DENVER TRIBUNE" PRIMER.


This sad disaster wrought.
THE DENVER TRIBUNE" PRIMER.
Simple Tales for the Pleasure and Profit
of the NHrsery Brigade.
Here we Have a Piece of Chewing
Gum. 1t is White and Sweet. Chew it
awhile and Stick it on the Under Side of
the Mantel Piece. The Hired Girl will
find it There and Chew it awhile Her
self and then Put it Back. In this Way
one Piece of Gum will Answer for a
Whole Family. When the Gum is no
Good, Put it in the Rocking Chair for the
Minister or your Sisters Beau to sit
Upon.
This is the Cock Roach. He is Big,
Black and Ugly. He is Crawling over
the Pillow. Do not Say Word, but lie
still and Keep your Mouth open. He
will Crawl into Your Mouth and You
can Bite him in Two. This will Teach
him to be more Discreet in Future.
III.
Here we Have a Baby. It is composed
of Bald Head and Pair of Lungs. One
Of the Lungs takes a Rest while the
Other runs the Shop. One of Them is
always On Deck all of the Time. The
Baby is Bigger man than his Mother.
He likes to Walk around with his
Father at Night. The Father does Most
of the Walking and All of the Swearing.
Little Girls, you will Never Know what
1t is to Be Father
The Peach is Hard and Green. He is
Waiting for Child to Come along and
Eat him. When he Gets into the Chill
little Stomach, he will Make things Hot
for that Child The Child Who eats the
Peach will Be an Angel before he Gets
Chance to Eat another If there were No
green Peaches there would not be so
many Childrens Sizes of Gold Harps in
Heaven.
Behold the Printer He is Hunting for
a Pickup of half Line. He has Been
hunting for Two Hours. He could have
Set the half Line in twenty Seconds, but
it is a Matter of Principle with Him never
to Set what he Can pick up. The Printer
has Hard time. He has to Set type all
Night and Play pedro for the Beer all
Day We would Like to Be a Printer
were it not for the Night Work.
VI
This is the Man who has had Notice
in the Paper. How Proud he is. He is
stepping Higher than Blind Horse If
he had Wings he would Fly Next week
the Paper will say the Man is a Measly
Old Fraud, and the Man will not Step so
High.
This sorry Spectacle is Plumber. He
is Ragged and Cold and Hungry. He is
Very, very Poor. When you see him
Next spring he Will be Very, very Rich,
and will wear Diamonds and Broadcloth.
His wife Takes in Washing now, but
She will be able to Move in the First Cir
cles by the Time the Weather turns
Warmer and the Pansies Bloom again.
Here is Castle 1t is the Home of a
Editor. 1t has Stained Glass windows
and Mahogany stairways. In front of
the Castle is a Park. Is il not Sweet.
The lady in the Park is the Editors wife.
She wears Costly robe of Velvet trimmed
with Gold Lace, and there are Pearls and
Rubies in her Hair. The editor sits on the
front Stoop smoking an Havana Cigar.
His little Children are Playing with dia-
mond Marbles On the Tesselated Floor.
The editor can afford to Live in Style
He gets Seventy-fve Dollars a month
Wages.
See the Lamp post. By its Dim Rays
you can Behold the Electric Light across
the Street. There is q Man leaning
against the Lamp-Post Perhaps the
Lamp Post would Fall if it Were not
For the Man. At any Rate, the Man
would Fall if it Were not For the Lamp
Post. What is the Matter with the Mani
He appears Disquieted. He is trying to
Work his Boots up Through his Mouth
He will have Headache Tomorrow and
Lay it to the Climate.
The Girl is Scratching her Back against
the Door. She has Been eating Buck
wheat Cakes Her Beau thinks she is
Delicate, but he has Never seen her
| Tackle Plate of Hot Cakes on Frosty
Morning. Cakes had better Roost High
when she IS Around Il we were the
Girl we Would wear Sand-Paper lining
IN the Dress and not be making Hair
| Brush out of the Poor Door.
The President aud the E<-President.
New York Sun, Oct. 20.
Arthur has lately spent a good many
hours in the society of Gen. Grant. There