The Emporia weekly news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1881-1889, 1881-10-27
II grafitude which i. win be diff

a d. Be gratitude which it win be diff
fcul Aim to ignore.
N is announced that Carter Harrison.
mayor Of Chicago, is soon to be united
in marriage with Miss Maggie Stearns.
The report that several intimate friends
of the unfortunate lady have already for
warded letters of coincidence would tend
TO confirm the rumor
Health Journals AID sanitary reform
ers are agreed, we believe, that socks
should be changed at least once year.
but an old man who votes the Democratic
ticket regularly has been found down in
Berks county. Pennsylvania, who wore a
pair of socks continually for thirteen
years.
Here's about the worst item We have
run across lately: "Have some milk
this mornings" asked the milkman of
TOozer, who stood at the back door.
mo, not this milk, some udder milk"
said the little one. And the milkman
walked chalk line away from the
house.
The latest essay in the direction of
train robbery was made near Bucyrus,
Ohio, on the Pittsburg, Fit. Wayne and
Chicago railroad, Monday evening. We
have been anxIously looking for the
Buckeye state to vindicate her reputa-
ton for enterprise and catch up with
the procession.
There are thirty-one 5000 subscrip-
lions to the Mrs. Garfield fund, three of
$4,000, six of $1,000, and eighty-seven
81, 900 each. The smallest subscription
is five cents, from poor cOlored person,
and the largest single contribution $l0,-
900, from a Philadelphian. There are in
all about 1 200 subscriptions.
There is some prospect of an attemp
to ''corner" the tobacco market. We
have no doubt that the women whose
husbands contribute to the peaceful
joys of the Preside by squirting amber
on the stove, would aid such an under
taking with cheerful alacrity.
The Yorktown centennial will go
down to history as one of the few pub
lie celebrations in this country in which
there was no political significance.
That this was true of it seems to be
abundantiy attested by the fact that Ohio
was the only state of prominence not
represented at the anniversary.
4 curious accident happened at the
electrical exposition in Paris. A gen.
tleman was leaning over to examine
closely an interesting machine, when
his gold chain made a connection be-
tween two conducting wires which hap
pened to be exposed. The chain imme-
diately became red-hot and set fire TO
the waistcoat, against which part of it
rested.
Governor Roberts, of Texas, who re-
Gently made such magnificent display
of his ears by refusing to issue procla-
nation setting apart day of prayer for
the late President Garfield, because it
conf1icted with his views on the divorce
ment of church and state, is said to be
looking for third term. If there is
any premium on exaggerated asses' in
the Lone Star State, we should regard
his success as foregone conclusion.
To pretty young girl Sidney Smith
once said: "Do you ever reflect how
you pass your lifes If you live to be
seventy-two, which 1 hope you may,
your life is spent in the following man.
ner: An hour day is three years; this
makes twenty-seven years sleeping, nine
years dressing, nine years at the table,
six years playing with children, nine
years drawing, walking and visiting, six
years shopping, and three years quar-
reling."
A burglar recently arrested in Lead
vile, but discharged for lack of evil
dence, is now limping about Colorado
with the tools of his profession neatly
concealed in his wooden leg. This con-
venient receptacle was not discovered
by the jailer until after he had received
instructions to release his prisoner, and
he was SO DESTROYS of beholding the in
genious arrangement of the wooden leg
that he promised to give the shrewd
scoundrel an hour TO get away in if he
would exhibit his novel tool-chest.
The festival season of the Chinese
year is about beginning and many Ce-
lestials are going home to enjoy it. The
Oceanic, which sailed on October 8 from
San Francisco for Yokohama and Hong
Kong, carried $40 Chinese in the steer
age. Just before the steamer left her
dock search for stowaways was made
with noteworthy results. No fewer than
ten pigtails with their owners attached
were found in various parts of the YES
sci and dragged forth to daylight and
disappointment. AS might have been
expected, great ingenuity had been ex-
ercised by the stOwaways in their efforts
to battle the customary search. Two or
three were taken aboard rolled up in
mating and slung upon poles which
were carried by confederates. An in
spection of the collins, of which ocean
steamers always carry several in antici-
patton of possible deaths during the
voyage, revealed a couple of crafty Mon
gOlians lying in snug seclusiOn.