The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1881-12-15

that it is laughable for old folks to
look al them. They haven't gesoTal-
Is got a second shirt, and they are no
more qualified TO get married than
steer i to preach. And YET marrying
j. about tie first thing they think OF.
A green boy, without dollar, pres
enj or prospective, sparkling girl reg
ularly and talking OF marrying is
spectacle for GODS and men. He should
be reasoned with, and If he will not
quit il until he Is able ID support a
wife, and 10 know who he loves, and
the difference between love and pas
sion, he should be qUarantined or put
IN convent erected on purpose for
sucE cases Niue-tenths OF the I'M
happy marriages are the result of
green human calves being allowed 10
run at large in the society pasture
without any yOkes or than. They
marry and have children before
they do mustsches; they are
fathers CT twins before they are pro-
prietors of two pairs of pants, and the
little girls they marry are old women
before they are twenty years old. DC
casiOnally one of these gOsling mar
risges turns out all right, but it is a
clear case of luck. If there was a law
against young galoots sparkling and
marrying before they have all their
teeth cut, we suppose the little cusses
would evade il some way, but there
ought to be = sentiment against it. 1t
/ is time enough for these bantams to
think of finding a pullet when they
I have raised money enough by their
own work t. buy bundle of laths to
/ build a hen house. But they see a Girl
who looks cunning, and they are
afraid there is not going to be girls
enOu Gil TO go around, and they begin
their work real spry; and before they
are aware of the sanctity Of the mar
rage relation they are hitched for
life, and before they own a coOkstOve
81 bedstead they have to get up in
the night and 60 for a doctor, so
frightened that they run themselves
out of breath and abuse the doctor be-
cause he does not run too; and when
the doctor gets there he finds that
there is not enough linen in the house
to wrap up a doll baby. 1t is at about
this time that young man begins to
realize that he has been a colossal
fool. as he flies around to heat
water and bring in the bath tub,
and he goes whooping after his moth
/ u VI AAOA iAOtiISiB AS AhA uS HeiiS
around the giils, his hair turns red in
a single night, and he calls high heav-
ell to witness that if he lives till MOI IL
ing, which he has doubts about, he
will turn over new leaf and never
get married again until no Is older.
And in the morning the green-look-
ing father" is around before drug
store is open, with no collar on, his
hair sticking every way, his eyes
blOOd-shot and his frame nervous,
waiting for the clerk to open the door
so he ca Il get some saffron to make
tea of. Less than a year ago he
thought he was the greatest man that
there was anywhere. but he sets there
in the house that morning, with hi,
wedding coat rusty and shiny, his
pants frayed at the bottom and
patched in the seat, and the nurse
puts in his arms a little bundle OF
flannel with baby hid in it, he hold,
t it as he would banana, and as ht
/ looks at his girl wife on the bed, near
z ly dead from pain and exhaustion
| and he thinks that there are not pro
2 visions enough in the house to feed
t canary, lump comes in his throat
: and he says TO himself that if he hat
= it to do over again he would ieav
, that little girl at home with he
5 mother, and he would wait till he hat
I six dollars to buy baby flannel am
= ten dollars 10 pay the doctor.