The People's vindicator. [volume] (Natchitoches, La.) 1874-1883, 1881-01-15

SOL.'eu. snH name, was never able to
nna. among the many girls Of my acquaint.
1Snee' one VINO fairly resembled my ideal.
.ne woman whom my Imagination had
. .'i1I WAS = mild, madonna like being,
viii FORM ana features OF classical outline,
renned pa!lor IN her cheeks, sweet coral
| like soft, low mtsic. wow
Pauline was by no means the luplicste Of
this Image. But when she dartsI. singing.
through the house, letting doors and win.
oows remain open, frequently laid down
my book Or pen, and gazed after her. and
1ett ~ II the bright sunlight had fallen into
my heart. In oil her actions. unres, ricted Al
they were by conventional sobriety. there Law
. grace aud charm, that pleased, nay, On.
we soon became good fvleuds-soucthiu
iike brother and sister, thought. How
TINS sentiment developed into love. l cannot
satisfactorily explain. One dsy - l was
taking ramble, came upon her unexpect.
ediy; she WAS walking slowly along, with her
eyes cast down, and looking more grave than
! had ever been before. When ehs saw me,
her face suddenly became trsus6xured With
radiance, but she quickly tripped BY. The
glowing OF her face and Tie respondent
lhr"hs Of my heart reveslcd to me what we
were to each other.
I've have been so happy together here ~
very happy" she whispered. quivvriny.
l he!d both OF her hands tightly; she
avoided looking ut me, hut did not turn away
"eI aaritng little face. continued:
BStwixt You and me there IL . consider.
ab'e disparity in age, and ! an by nature
much more seriously constituted than YOU.
Excepting you, have never loved . woman,
while you have cOnqucred-Hcaven knows
now many hearts. You are not what tho
world SAYS Of you; You have heart that can
love and be true. Therefore | pray you, toll
me frankly and faithfully whether you can
love me-or do love me. am not sccus.
TONED to addressing such questions, and do
not know, perhaps how to express myself
c0nfOrmaby to the requirements OF an occa.
sion like this; but believe me when l cay
that you have won my heart, and that do
not think could be happy without you"
~ believe YOU"
I" But will you trust me, too, and love
~ love you and trust you," she answered,
frankly. Are You not surprised that I tell
you this so quietly: That Is because l shall
never marry you. am capricious and pre-.
summing, and would soon make you weary Of
life with my constant demand for attention.
! was born to be treated like y spoiled lap.
dog; YOU are, although capable Of loving.
nevertheless not an ehectionate man. We
should not have passed two months In wed.
lock before you'd wish me in Cayenne, or
some other torrid locality. But o. that would
not he practicable. therefor you would break
my heart-not rudely and harshlv, oh, no
| as clear to me ~ II had II ali before my eyes
ut this mOmentw
She looked At me, and her whole soul was
| in the glance; 1t spoke love, passion and
yearning tenderness. Oh, what strange
| feelings, never hitherto experienced, this
glance awakened within me! The next mo.
Ment held her in my arms, and exclaimed:
."Pauline, II ever man loved woman, with
all bis heart and soul, unreasonably, madly,
and yet truly and honestly, 1t is l."
But will that last, George?"
bent down, and our kisses breathed oil
the delicious fervor of first and true love.
"lou must be my wife, Pauline :" cried.
Her head dropped upon my shoulder, and
her hand sought and clasped mine.
hand mine!"
III you wish, Georgie!"
Oh! this "GeOryie," which fell for tho
first time from her lips, how infinitely blessed
it made me! From that time she always
called me 50. But when she ceased to love
me this sound also died, aud since thea she
again called me George.
Shortly afterward we were married. Our
honeymoon lasted six months, and, be.
live, would have lasted forever had not
acted 80 foOlishly. Now sigh In vain for q
return Of that time.
Pauline hal been called tickle, fighty.
How fallaciOus this idea! A truer heart
could not have existed.
II only needed master, George" she
used to say to me when talked and laughed
over this matter. ''Durfng my maidenhood
/ was constantly on the lookout for him
| could not find him, however, and came to the
conclusion finally that I should never meet
him. But when / heard your voice for the
first time, and gaZed into your ewes. then I
knew that had found this master at last
-and how gladly l carry the chains Of my
| masterw
She said this in full seriousness. Best Of
all, she was pleased whea l coaxed and
played with her az child. She was not an
angel; she was passionate, high.sOuled
woman. She rebelled hundred times q day
and yet she loved my dominion. She became
attractive whenever, with eyes flashing, she
rushed to the door, threatening to leave the
room, yet instantly stood still, with head
lowered, when l called to her: "Stop!
Shut the door; have something to say TO
YOU" But this was rather dangerous, for
it made apparent the power had over her.
/, who had never been loved before, could
hardly help becoming tyrant when saw
such noble head bend to me.
She loved me. Every chord of her heart
vibrated ct my n,erest touch; but was not
satisfied. undertook to modify the tones:
her dOting homage itself was the instrument.
Tfue-n0w see all clearly-this instrument
was sword, with which cruelty wounded
her. A very sage idea entered my head, and
whispered to me that was making child
with so much warm sunlight In her, full
womanly power would never be developed.
] acted according to this idea, altogether
overlooking the fact that her mental and
moral force had already been entirely un-
folded and matured. and that, too, at time
when Others just begin to be aware that there
are rocks and storms, shoals and quicksanlls
in the ocean Of life. I also forgot that, in
spite Of her youthful gayety and exuberance
of spirits, the lessons Of a long, bitter.
gloomy past would never be lost upon her:
their impress was merely hidden from my
eyes beneath blithe exterior.
-
She had for while completely exercised
my legal solemnity; now determined to re-.
turn to my whilom state, and not to be coz.
ened away again so easily. Idelved into my
papers for hours, without speaking word.
She did not complain. So long as she was
assured Of my love she was content, and
likewise worked on more diligently. Her
writinS.desk stood just opposite mine. At
times paused to observe her indefatipahlv
dancing pen; but then she was sure to look
up, while happy smile played around her
lips. One day, as she raised her eyes to
mine, l happened to be In very unrcasona.
BILE frame OF mind; her rallying love.look
almost irritated me, and said shortly:
"You annoy me when you look at me in
that manner.''
Glad to get an opportunity to chat with
me, she dropped her pen, came to my side,
and bent over me.
,"Why, my dear? The glance was for him
Hove"
That was apoor beginning for the pre-.