The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1881-09-29
A Hitch in tie Ceremonies,

81 hate to See hitch i'm a wetldin' !"
remarked farmer from out Jamaica
way. as he dropped into the counting
room with nuptial notice. alt looks
bad and it makes talk"
Anything wrong about this we'd
ding?" asked the clerk, as he made
| change for the old man.
Nothing positively wrong, but it
! didn't launch like want to see things
of that kind. You seen by the notice
that Buck Thomas was marryin' Mary
Bliff, and at one time we begun to think
they never would git through that GER
emOnv." f8e ae
''What was the hitchP'' s-is5
"Why. Buck is Methodist. and Mary
is 'Piscopalian, and as one wa"ts [
one service, and the other another they
patched up some kind of scheme to
have both. Neither would go to the
others church. but each has their own
minister and the wed,ln' come off in
the school-honse. The 'Piscopal min
lister married Mary. and the Methodist
undertook to marry Buck, and there
they was takin' alternate whacks at the
thing. and neither payin' any attention
to the other. The Metho list brother
fired off n sermon first. and the bride
sat down and went to Sleep. Then the
'Piscopsliau said as how, we'd all
dropped in to see that woman fined,
but he wouldn't say who to, and want
ed to know if there was any objections.
That started up the Methodist. who be-
gan TO ask Buck if he knew what
solemn business he was peggin' at, and
if he really meant trade. All that time
the 'Piscopalian was hoverin' around
about this woman and Mary was say
in she'd do this and that and the 9TH
er. The Methodist was marryin' away
on his side and finally they brought up
agin stump"
'.How's thatp' asked the clerk.
''Well. the 'Piscopalian wouIdn'trec
Ognize Buck or his minister. and the
Methodist wouldn't have nothin' to do
with Mary or her preacher and there
was no way of gittin' them together.
Everything was all really except asilin'
them if they'd take each other. and
neither one of 'em would do it. Mary
and Buck was standin' hand in hand,
and the crowd was gettin' hungry"
.'How did they get through it?''
''They had to compromise. They
wraugled for Il time. and finally Buck
spoke up of his own accord said he'd
take Mary for his welded wife, and
then Mary Clipped in and said she'd
take Buck Tor her husband. At that
they pumped on another snag."
''In what respectP" inquired the
clerk.
Because there vas no one to pro-
nounce 'em man and wife, Buck tried
to reason Mary into lettin' the Metho-
dist do that part, and Mary argued
with Buck and tried to persuade him
into listenin' to her preacher; but it
was no use. That brought on another
row, and as it was gittin' nigh on to
dark. we all felt that somethin' ought
to be done, as we'd been there most all
day. aeA
swell. did they get marriedP'' asked
the tired clerk.
Eyes, we fixed it up. The ministers
was gittin' pretty mad ut each other. but
they agreed that they'd each attend to
their own flock. SO the Methodist said
Il now prOnunce you man, and the
'Piscopaiian said Il now pronounce
you wife, and they let it go at that.
Then Buck paid the Methodist. and the
'Piscopalian wanted to know where he
came in. Back said he'd hired his
man and paid him, and as he was not
responsible for his wife's foolishness
be ore marriage, her parson could
whistle for his wealth. 1 guess there'H
be lawsuit abort it. for the Pis-opa-
liam says he'll have half of that fl uol-
lars if it takes a leg off to the armpit.
l don't like to See them bitches at we'd
din's. 1t don't look right. and it amt
business" es.7z- isate&j go
With this reflection the old man but.
toned up his change, aud drove home
in deep meditation Brooklyn Eagle. !