The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1881-05-18
T'Fae Nocturnal Cow.
With the opening of my spring movements

N
With the opening Of my spring movements
in the agricultural line comes the cow.
Laramie has about seven COWS that annoy
me agood deal. They work me up so that I
lose my equanimity. I have mentioned this
matter before, but this spring the trouble
seems to have assumed some new features,
The prevailing COW for this season seems to
be q seal-brown with a stub tail, which is
arranged as a nighE-key. She wears it
banged.
The other day | had just planted my cellu-
loid radishes and irrigated my royal Bengal
turnips and SOW my h~unting-case summer
squashes, and this COW went by trying 10
convey the impression that she was out for q
walk.
That night the blow fell. The queen Of
night WAS high in the blue vault OF heaven
and the twinkling stars. The people Of Lar
annie were in their beds. So were my aunt
ing-case summer squashes. | heard ahealthy
step near the conservatory where my celluloid
radishes and picked beets are growing, and I
arose.
It was a lovely sight. At the head Of the
procession there was q seal-broWn COW with
a tail like 8 handle on a pump, and standing
at an angle Of forty-ive degrees.
That was the COW.
Following at q rapid gait was a bewitching
picture of alabaster limbs and Gothic joints
and Wamsutta muslin night robe.
That was me.
The queen of night withdrew behind d
cloud.
The vision seemed to break her all up.
. o. axJ lya tharn ~ q q aroch or1 tho
seal-brown cow went home carrying the gar
den gate with her as a kind of keepsake.
She had plenty Of garden gates at home 10
her collection, but she had none of that par
ticular pattern. So she wore it home around
her neck.
The writer of these lines then carefully
brushed the sand off his feet with a pillow
sham and retired to rest.
When the bright Maymorning was ushered
in upon the busy world the radish and squash
bed had melted into chaos and there only re-
manned some sticks of stove-WoOd and the
tracks Of a COW, interspersed with the dainty
little footprints Of some Peri or other who
evidently stepped four yards at a lick. and
could wear a number nine shoe il necessary.
Yesterday morning it was very cold, and
when I went out to feed my royal self-acting
hen, I found tbs same cow wedged into the
hen-coop. O, blessed opportunity! 0, thrice
blessed and long-sought revenge!
Now I had her where she could not back
out. and l secured large picket from the
fence, and took my coat off, and breathed in
q full breath. [ did not want to kill her, [
simply wanted to make her wish that she had
died Of membranous Group when she was
young.
While / was splitting On my hands she
seemed to catch my idea, but she saw how
hopeless was her position. | brought down
the picket with the condensed strength and
eagerness and wrath Of two long, suffering
years. It struck the corner Of the hen house.
There was d deafening crash and then all
was still, save the low, ripping laugh of the
cow, as she stood in the alley and encouraged
me while I nailed up the hen-house again.
Looking back over my whole life, it seems
to me that it is streWn with nothing but the
rugged ruins Of my busted anticipations.-
"BM Nye and Boomerang" By B11 Nye.