Litchfield enquirer., 1881-11-10
CLIPPINGS.

The bakers turnover is a pie-houae fraud. An excellent tax collectors claw ham. mer.
 Tue love of . bonnet is the root of all evil. 4s Speaking of duels. the year of Jubal E. has c0me.
 Train up child in ths way you should have gone yourself.
 When they tap a railroad is it to let the water out of the stock. s~4 sl I Thsyou,h who f'soes lwinoa lis apt to I mix inf more or less tares. -A Aphnrism by a perfectly reckless belle 1: ''Be fir,usus and yaulwill be happy" as
 Dr. Hiss things s25. 600 will impart lsod. able character to bis pnrse cavity.-ss - A eamecock9 ' ought to be gnod eating Does not the poet say ''the bravest are the tenGerest 20 One of the most pressing needs of Louis vile is 2 z.nlogicai garden stocked with ani- malls that eat cats. 2
 How many carriages shall you want to haul the grief '" is said to be the way the un- | ACttoActS put As HI OSouWOOO Jones thinks man fortunate who has his will contested after death only. He says his | will has been contested since he welded Mrs. Jones. r~, ~s.,r. -s. 1 A cOrODer's verdict reads thus: ''The ''de ! ceased came t, his death by excessive drink | ing. prtduciug apoplexy in the minds of the jury" T1
 The question whether an Indian will stop l fighting and take to agriculture or not, de- pe.ds on whether he Ina enough squaws to do aAl Alla tAss swieH HE ZULU .GA5li1 U In some of the western cities the papers pay sO n,uch attention to society matters that 6 man can't 70 home sober without having the incident mentioned
 A Frenchman in business in California ad- ,esaises. that he has h '.chssdi"lfor au appren- tice. He Lad looked up the word ''opening'' | r 'as dle.ippafry;g ggiE%1 f7ng9 1 If the usual autumn arrest of one or more of the Bender family yis. not made pretty snn faeA9'ie will begiiao suspect that Western wig iiance is s.,und asleep
 When the Chicago i,iau saw Niagara he shed tears ..Durn h!" said he, T sin't eltllah of iiarho describe it and make it out any bigger than it is."
 When aas ruined physician placed hls door plate in pawn he was hea d t. remark: Had sigued the. pledge. l would gnot, now have to I pledge the sign.
 1 Rev. pr. John Hall believes that newspa- per writers if given q text could often write a better sermon than sOtne ministers. It would be bad for the newspaper business if they couldL't
 1 ;. It sounds funny to read that several city aldermen were drunk at the dedication of tue city waterwOrks.a Some fiendin human shape must have poured barrel of whiskey in the 1 reservoir. ' 7'-s E Professor in psychology ::.'Can we conceive of anything as being out 0f time and still Oc- cupying space pc Musical student (thought- fuiy) )-"Yes, sir; poor singer in chorus"
 When the girl who has encouraged a young man for about two years suddenly tells him that she can never be more than Sister to lin lie can fuf ths first time see the freckles I ol'her nose. Es | Tue English are great, practical jpkers. Jus, @nYW they Are rdfng in the Hgiest fMkIng ve hicles dancal ingenuity can invent, just for the fun of seeing some Americans try to get theirs made the same way. 1 Student under examination in physics- z What planets were known ts the ancients ?' | Welt SIT, there fs.ere Venus and Jupiter. aud d''-after a pause-''I think the earth, but I'm no, Quite certain"
 l If you don't believe advertisements are read pu, one line Tn the furtherest corner of any frs class daily The line, to have it's full and immediate effect. should be: Wanted dTga gGyoaprice paid. We nave Ndiscovered that all does not de. peud on the size of the dog. A canine ulay Oe as big ss a calf and just as harmless or he may he no bigger than \. rat and yet twice aa l vicious.
 Everyefew days nature ~reaebes sout he, hand. slneezes a eP ngy lOokihg sclnud tha, exudes few drops of water. aud then the old daune smiles as benignly ss if she h6d cooled us of with regular shower. 1 "A bright little seyen-years-old girl was wis. 2 itins tile aihen@ual Rcea,ty.s When she saw r the Venus de> Miio,s win, the large card at- 1 tsched warning visitors not to touch it, she said "'Hsnds off!' Humph, any body can see that 1"
 man. tl,e .valedjct0riah n fhebfsw. and the
 
 cou,es to real classical culture our native land is there. The pitcher of the Yale Base Bal l club is an American. r TIA sarcastic Georgia edltF, in \ noticing I'd fair which recently came of in Macon, says ''One of our contempOraries took a very val. uable premium. but ned,iles me and firn btsp'ice,san made ghipI put it right back where he took 1t from"
 '.Is there any opening here for an intellect ual writer p asked a seedy, red-nosed indi vuual of and editor ''Yes. my fri, nd, ,"' re- piled the man of quills. "A considerate car penter, foreseeing your visit, left an npenine for yon, Tarn tne knob to tles right"
 "Wau, any species If slosesa asked ped ,iler s,f x salotIn keeper Fo,le day this week. "Vat for want uln ?" asked the proprietor ''To take away the smell "f beer from the breath, exclaimed the peddle.. Take ava, Edeusniel ov bets r, exclaimed tfeanan bebi,d the counter. You got sonedings vat make, der smell stay on, buys him."
 "You were not riding this afternoon, were yol Cicely, my desr?" inquired her intimate last evening.
 .Nos Don't you think, fmy dear little DO ny ibns she pinkeycs'I IL E!I1U
 ''Is'nt that dreadful. And dark red pony at that How unbecoming to his complex. ion?"
 Old Mir. Tripp of Deer6eld, Mich.. Ina. been arrested for shooting thieves wns were stealing his fruit As he is in his 85h year, it is considered outrageous that he should nci have known. .that fruit ip the United States belongs to every body except the man on 1 whose property It grows. and whose time and labcr have been spent in rsising it. | r E 1 An old fellow whose daughter had failed tn secure a position as teacher in consequence of not passing m examination. said: They asked her lots of fthings she didn't know Look at the history questions! They asked her about things that happened before she was born! How was she going to know about them?
 Few people, says writer, ''realize what \ wonderfully deiicate structure the human