The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1881-02-01
BRIC-A-BRAC.

"A Tramp's Motto-"A little earn
ing is dangerous thing"
Our society people will bo exceed
ingly sorry 10 learn that their friend,
the Queen Of Denmark, is dangerously
london ladies carry their muffs
into the ballroom, and when tLev
dance give tho muf' to another mutf to
hold.
-Bcrnbardt dies so realistically that
it il said Il nat a coroner, who saw her.
ran around 10 the stage door and want
ed to hold an inquest.
Tho expression, "I should smiIe,"
IS believed to have originated in Cana
da. That country consumed five mil
non gallons Of whskey last year.
Tile passenger elevators may be
all very well, but the quickest and
surcst way Of getting up stares is to
come into church late with new and
gorgeous bonnet.
Ono gentleman was trying to de-
scribe to another what is meant bv
"old gold" color. He said: "Well, to
tell the truth, it is black eye about
four days palcd."
-Adolphus-You wrong your Young
friend. When he spoke Of having a
private box at the theatre he did not
aiiudc to a pugilistic encounter, as YOU
suppose, hut an apartment adjoining
the stage, from which to view the
play.
---."Georgie," said Il devoted young
mother to her very Juvenile son, "vou
cannot have another cookie till YOU
ask for it properly" "Please, for
Christ's sake, amen" said the little
Innocent, with Immediately folded
hands.
Little Ounce Cooking I'D suddenly
from her history 6ook) doh, NANNY
darling, do so wish Id lived under
James the Secondn Mamma-.sWhv2" ?"
Little Dunce-"Bccause I see here
that education was very much neglect
ed in his reign"
A literary society in Pennsylvania
recently discussed the question whcth-
er ga tidy woman with cross temper
is preferable rs wife to an untidv
woman with sweet temper" and the
decision was in favor Of the tidy wo-
man.
.-"Did you slip?" they asked The
ola gentleman rs they picked him up.
con, no. he growlcd, "of course not.
| was trying TO sec if could sit down
on that coal-holc-top hard enough to
break it. Did it just for the fun of the
thing" And he glarcd at them say
agely, and they somehow felt mighty
foolish.
AT camp-mccting last summer a
venerable sister began the hymn-
"My soul be on thy guard,
Ten thousand foes aiisc."
She began too high. "Tcn thousand P"
she scrccchcd and stopped. "Start her
at five thousand," cried a converted
stock-brokcr present.
The Chinese minister at Washino-
ton is credited with an excellent bon
mot. Some one asked him what his
c"untrymcn would do, where they
would go if they were driven out of
the United States? "I expect. SIR"
he replied, "that they would go to Ire
land, as that seems the only country in
which the Irish do not rule"
They had been to see the tragedy
Of "Julius Caesar" and on their way
home thoughts Of death of the great
dictator seemed to affect her so much
that she turned to Algcrnon and cx-
claimed: "WasDt it. sad to be cut I'D
so horr;b;y" "Aw-ycs," sympa-
thctically responded Al"crnpn; "and
he probably had Oh his best clothes"
-"Whcn did you say the honey
moon cmdcd" she suddenly asked, as
she turned from the window. "It may
last a week or year." replied the old
bald-hcad. "Miuc lasted twelve davs
only" "W hy, how was that?' "Oh,
wife and ] sat down to a game Of
cards, and we hadn't made four points
before called her Ounce, and she
said was a liar"
-"Can you tell me-" said punstcr
who had in our sanctum popped, and
upon the floor was seeking for cop
per he had dropped, "can YOU tell me
why at present am like Noah's weary
dovc? And he glanced with inward
trcmor toward gun that hung above.
Nv ouldst thou knowH he oucried
blandly, rs he lodged the cudgcl stout
winch We SHE'D at him in anger" its
because Pm one cent out"