davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Daily Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883, 1881-01-26


+ size IN ii~ effects Wiid m - action - u
tucS NOT hli~t-T. and ,vi ~ y penetrating
and tluyyrrIal tu reach ANY deep ~vaird psiin
or in rruuyc ANY buUy growth or ANS ctlrr
enlargement. II used iuT several days. ~lch
- >saVin>. Spliut>. cGrirS c.iliCU>. SpTJai>.
~Nciliu..~ any lamrnC~> and III, rt.l1r-cIugu'~
uf tn, Joints or limbs. uf rhptjiaaii>ni an Inih
and fur any purpU>e iur which iniIaCW J.
used for man or beast II i now known tU
be- ths. hest lIuImrilt fer man ever used. act
ilg miid and Vet certain IA: IL c1crt> 10 i
used full strength with perfect safety I'll ali
Sr.iS1nS of the year.
send address for illustrated circular. which
We think gives positive pfoCf Of H. virtues
NJ remedy has ever met with Such. unqu:tli-
fed >urcrSS. 10 our knowledge, for beast ~
well - man
Price II per bottle. or six bottles fnr -.
ALL DRUGGISTS have IL oT ran get u for
YOU. or IL will be sent IO any address On rc-
ceipt uf price 10y the pTopriPtnT>.
DIR. Il. i. KENDALL \ CO.
EnUShuTsh Fails, Vermont.
CRANE * BRIGHAM. Agents.
san Francisco, California.
HODGE, DAVIS x Co, Agents.
Portland, Oregon.
The Daily Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883, 1881-01-26
. CR o FU La.
$1,000

ulli ur paid .u ans PGi'lr iIu>piiil iU '.r iat.-
'I..iiy agreed oppose. iug Cy"Tl certificate ~
this mriiriur PgiHi>I.-,i bs ~ which j. gpi
The Daily Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883, 1881-01-26
Perseverance, UM Tel.

STOUGHTON. Mass. March II. lSSJ.
T. J. KENDALL y Co.. tscntS in Justice
L. yol and myself. I think ouSil to irt You
know thai | nave removed two BONE SPA
WINS with "kcndIii'> SPAWN Cur" Olir very
large one dOu't know now long ;hr SPAWN
had hccu thcTc. ! have owned the horse eight
months. ID took ne truT months tu take the
Iarys, On,. OF aud tyyn for the ~mIll one.
have used ~ h1Itic>. Tee hers l. entirely
well. nuI at all stiff and Hn l,U'iciI ju hc SEEN
or felt This i - wonderful medicine. ID II
a new thing here. iui il il 'io, e, I"r :tll what
il mas done for me i'll sale viii h,' very CT,-;ii.
EeS,tcrtfuIlX VOti->. GHN~ r. FAGKEE
The Daily Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883, 1881-01-26
KENOALl'S SPAWN CURE
ON HUMAN FLESH.

PNTTEN'> MILLS. Washington 60. Ny,
February u. IS7S
T. J kFNpAI.I- Vi. D.: Dear SIT The
lrtr;irt.lar t-.t>. un which Ii,t-d your SPAWN
i'urr" v:.> a malignant ankle >pT.tn 1i ~iN
teen months SiHil,,M. nad iTicd many
fiiI.>. buI iu vain. Your spawn Cure
uut il, i,rI ;u tii' gr'Iu,d .g;iiu. ami, for iht
Ir>l lime >iury hurt. in natural position.
For q ftmiIy t'riuIrnt g -Ngr.- ANY ythWC W
ever used. Yours truly.
ETV. VI. l.. BEI.I..
The Daily Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883, 1881-01-26
REL. Il. ". GRANGER,

I'r.Sidiu. Elder uf The -. Aba District.
1T. ALENN>. Vt. IAN. %. lS~O
DI;. l.. I. kENbNII. y Co, tirniS In Ir-
ply tu Your letter will SaI that my expert
t-nrr with krudili'> span II cure l:t~ been
very satisfactory i,dcrd- Three or four
years aso prrruTrd :. hattlt. ni your agent.
and with II. cured Il hUT,c uf iamcncS> caused
by SPAWN. Last season my hOT>r became
very lame and ! turned him out for u few
weeks when hc became better, hut when |
put him on the road he grew worse. when ]
discovered that a rin@-hOne wis forming. j
procured a bottle Oi krndallS SPAWN cure
and with les than bottle cured 50 thai he is
nut lame, neither can tire bunch be- found.
Respectfully NUuT>. L. y. GRANGEE
The Daily Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883, 1881-01-26
KERpALuS SPAvIg CURE

Pastor NJ. = Church Paitrn's : Milis. =. Y
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17
LENGTH OF THE MISSISSIPPI.

Mark Twain mOurnS over the dimin-
ished length of the Mississippi in this
strain: Therefore, the Mississippi be-
tween Cairo and New Orleans, was 125
miles long 176 years ago. 1t was 1180
after the cutoff of 1922. 1t was 1910
after the American bend cutoff some
years ago. 1t has lost 81 miles since.
Consequently, its length is only 973
miles at present, Now, if wanted to
be one of those scientific people, and to
prove what had occurred in the long
past by what had occurred i'll a given
time in the recent past, or what will oc-
cur in the far future by what has oc-
CURED in late years, what an Opportu-
nifty is here! Geology never had such
a chance nor such exact data to argue
from! Nor development of species,
either. Glacial epochs are great things,
but they are vague-vague. Please
observe. In the space of 176 years the
IOMC1 A1oolooIpp1 Aceo ohO4OCACu 1JOCA
242 miles. That is an average of
trifle over one mile and a third per
year. Therefore any calm person, who
is not blind or idiotic, can see in the
old Oolitic Silurian period, just 1,0O0,-
900 years ago next November, the
lower Mississippi was upwards of 1, ,3OO,-
600 miles long, and stuck out over the
Gulf of Mexico like a fishing rod. And,
by the same token, any person can see
that 742 years from now the Mississippi
will be only a mile and a quarter long,
and Cairo and New Orleans will have
joined their streets together, and be
ploddipg comfortably along under a
single mayor and a mutual board of
aldermen. There is something fascin-
ating about science. One gets such
wholesale returns of conjecture out of
such tTifing investments Of fact.
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17
A STRANGERS MISTAKE.

A few days ago Western merchant
entered dry goods house on Broad
way and accosted the first person he
met with:
care you the proprietor ?"
mot exactly" was the reply : "I
am shipping clerk, but 1 am cutting
my card for partnership next year by
organizing a noon prayer meeting in
the basement. y
Inc stranger passed on to a very i'm
portant-looking parsonage with a dia-
mondpin and asked
care you the head of the house ?o
"Well, no; can't say that am at
present, but have hopes of a partner
ship in January. Pm only one of the
travellers just now, but am laying for
a 5000 pew in an uptown church, and
that will mean a quarter interest in
less than six months.''
The next man had his feet up and
his hat back, and a twenty-five cent
cigar in his mouth, and he looked so
solid that the stranger said:
'You must run this establishment ?,'
J" Well 1 may run it very
soon. At present I'm bookkeeper.
but Pm expecting to get into the choir
where the old mans darling is, and be-
come an equal partner here. y
The stranger was determined not to
make another mistake, and walked
around until he found a man with his
coat off and busy with a case of goods,
and he said to him:
''You porters are pretty busy here,
1 see ?''
Yes" was the brief reply.
"But 1 suppose you are planning to
invest in gospel-hymn book and sing
the old man out of an eighth interest,
aren't you ?''
"Well, no not exactly" was the
quiet reply, II am the old man him
self. .
And all that stranger said, after a
long minute spent in looking the mer-
chant over, was:
''Well, durn my buttons Pa.
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17
TITLES FOR LADIES.

What awkward prefxes Mrs. and
Miss are to be the names of our women
Mr. is distasteful enough as a mascu-
line title, but that the unpronouncea-
BILE Mrs. and the kissing Miss should
have survived as long as they have is
reflection upon the good sense of En-
glish-speaking people. Mistress or
Mrs. might be revived indeed, it
would be great improvement but
how inferior even this term is to
Madame of the French For Madem-
oiselle we have actually no exact equiv
alent, for this term may be used either
as prefix to the name or separately as
title, while the use of Miss without
the name to follow is a vulgarism of
the deepest dye. This fact leads to
many awkwardnesses. How shall a
person address a young lady whose
name he does not know? To say
"Miss'' is abominable ; to say 'sMad-
am,'' if she is very young, is absurd
to borrow 'Mademoiselle'' would be
an affectation. The Language abso-
lutely provides nothing appropriate in
such an emergency, unless a word fairly
obsolete in this use is revived-the
word lady. We occasionally hear COM
mon people address lady simply as
lady, while the better informed, as they
are supposed to be, stumble at
Madam Or are guilty of the i'm
propriety of saying "Miss." It could
be adopted more freely in this country
than in England, because here it is not
a title Of rank, and no exclusive class
is entitled it.-AppIeton' Journal.
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17

Fred Douglas has probably got the
softest place in the gift of the govern
ment, that of register of deeds of the
District of Columbia. The pay is 81, 900
per annum. The former register says
it is as good place as he knows of, and
as free from the cares of business.
He says that while he held the Office his
" office hours were from half past twelve
to quarter of one every other We'd
nesday." We hate to see a rich govern
ment confne its officers to their offices
in such manner. This is what is
killing off prematurely, so many of our
American Office holders and we trust
Mr.. Douglas will take little more re-
creation than his predecessor has done
Picks San.
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17
ELLIOTT, JOHNSON & co.,
BANKERS & BROKERS.

WILMINGTON, DELAWARE.
WE DESIRE to call special attention to our
w superior facilities over Philadelphia
houses in executing orders for the purchase
and sale of stocks and all securities, III that
our Office is now connected, by direct prfUdte
wires with New York, Boston, Philadelphia,
& Washington. Quotations will be cheerfully
furnished by wire, and our daily letter and
closing prices sent by mail every evening to
any one desiring them.
Local securities bought and sold. Cash
ready for good first mortgages at both and
per cent. mchlSn
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17

Some students of Harvard College
have revived the Greek drama, and gave
one OF them last Monday evening before
an audience of over ZOO. Greek dra-
ma would catch our coppers every time.
We have never seen the time yet that
we wouldn't pay a dollar to 90 and
hear something that we couldn't un-
derstand. PecE's Sans
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17

Later, the summer had faded. The
chilly days of late autumn hung over
the little village. Leigh Sargent, who
had come up for fewdays, endeavored
to grant Miss June the opportunity to
finish the abridged quarrel.
-" You've said enough" he laughed,
at last. "COme, June, you love me
some, after all, and you are going to be
my dear little wife, aren't you P''
+" No, I don't, and I'm not p decid-
edly returned his companion, red with
vexatiOn. 81 think you assume too
much altogether. In the face of both
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17

The best people will vote for the best
man every time. And we judge by the.
number OF the st. Jacobs Oil constitu-
ency, that it is the best remedy for the
rheumatism known. Prof. Tice, of
st; Louis, among others, says so.-R,e-
raj Nes0 Yorker,
Middletown transcript., 1881-06-17

SEVERAL cases are said to have oc-
CURED in Georgia Of paralysis caused by
locusts. One of these creatures fastens
itself to the exposed skin, as Of the
face, and the victim becomes paralyzed.
The locust which causes this terrible
prostration of the nervous power is said
to be the seventeen-year locust, having
red eyes and HW'' on the wings.
We think, in justice to their reputa-
tions as law-abiding, ,highly-respectable,
and honorable citizens, that Messrs.
Williams, (of the NorristoUn Herald,
Weaver, (of the Ne,o Haven Register
Wilkins, (of the Whitehall Times,
Whipple, (of the Yonkers Gazette and
Way, (of the Middletown TRAN
SCRIPT ought to have the W. mark
removed from these locusts. It is an
outrageous impertinence on the part of
the locust, and should not be tolerated.
-Phila. San.
Cheyenne transporter. [volume] (Darlington, Indian Terr.) 1879-1886, 1881-11-25
ALL SORTS.

why, cock ROBIN, to be sure.
n little Learning in doctor is q
dangerous thing to the patient.
Nature keeps the ocean tide. and
that is why it does not run awsy like a
river.
The editor of a lower MARYLAND pa
per has fifty subscribers who pay in
oysters.
Ii you want to get rich mount a
mule, because when you are on a mule
you are better off.
The feeble tremble before opinion.
the foolish defy it, the wise Judge it.
the skillful direct it.
The run of silver salmon was new
er so extensive in Puget sound waters
as during the present season.
The Philadelphians have become
used to the colored policemen, who
now attract no particular attention.
The hog may not be thoroughly post.
ed in arithmetic, but when YOU come
TO square root he is there-the hog
is.
n force of sixteen to eighteen hun.
dred men are at work on the Salt Lake
end of the Denver and Salt Lake rail.
road.
A tough tale is told about a Russell.
vile (ky) dog who, when he forgets
his night key, rings the door-bell for
admittance.
Oswego, y. Y, with a population of
$4,000, has had more fires since Jan.
|, 1881, than Syracuse, with popula-
tion of $4,000,
There We're in the port of San Fran
cisco. Oct. %, 105 vessels to load with
wheat. They would carry about t..
100000 centals.
A thief in Rochester robbed seven
contribution boxes and got 20 cents.
And he thought that for contribution
boxes they panned out well.
Though the average small boy may
steal away and eat watermelon all by
himself, he never refuses to share his
medicine with little sister.
Pennsylvania locomotive works are
doing such an immense business that
they will not accept orders for engines
to be delivered before Jan. /, 1888.
When statistics show that pig can
live thirteen days without food or
drink, farmers are foolish to feed them
so often. Yes, sir; it's pig blunder.
Farmers of southern Oregon went
largely into the business of raising
hn
are represented to be very satisfactory.
An agricultural paper advises the
farmer to count his sheep every day.
If it comes to that, we would advise
the farmer to move into a better neigh
borhood
A lover discovered that his girl wore
two sets of gold-mounted false teeth,
and he sat down and wrote poem en-
titled Erich and rare were the gums
she Wore"
The four principal druggists of Os-
wego, n. Y, are said to have 345 regu-
lar morphine customers. Many of
them are from the country round about
the village.
A member of the New Hampshire
legislature denounced bill that was
under discussion as "treacherous as
was the stabbing of Caesar by Judas in
the Roman capital"
The Wheeling Central Glass works
recently shipped to Germany large
invoice of glassware, principally beer
mugs, dishes, etc. 1t was the largest
shipment ever made by the works to a
foreign country.
rha rrnu rinnno oauS. "a Snrntnorn
Cheyenne transporter. [volume] (Darlington, Indian Terr.) 1879-1886, 1881-11-25
The Senstor's Visiting Card.

The Washington correspondent of
the Boston Journal says: The mystic
letters written on visiting cards is a
source of bewilderment to the congress
men from rural districts, who cannot
decipher their meaning. Once that
stalwart Kentuckian, Senator Nc Creery,
met foppish young constituent, who
had just returned from Paris, and said
to him: 81 received your card the 9TH
er day. | recognized your fathers
name, which is the same as yours, and
supposed that it was his son; but what
did the letters f. T., written in the
corner, mean? ?" "Why," Mr.. Senator,
replied the travelled man, it is custo-
mary in Paris to write the initials of
certain words on leaving cards. For
example. had l been going away,
should have written p. p. c., the ini-
tials of Pour prendre cOnge-to take
leave. AS it was, calling myself,
wrote f. T., the initials OF en- perSonne
in person" "Ohw said McCreery.
81 understand" A week or two after
ward the two met again and the young
man said: senator, received your
card, but | couldn't comprehend what
the letters S. b. A. n. in the corner
meant. Pray interpret them?' with
pleasureP said McCreery, his eyes
twinkling with humor. IS b. A. n.
are the initials of sent by a nigger.'"
The young man tried to laugh, but
see the point of the inscrip-
ton. Others did.
Cheyenne transporter. [volume] (Darlington, Indian Terr.) 1879-1886, 1881-11-25

has also lifted a heavy mortgage off
the land with the proceeds of her crops.
"A woman's hand is a great trouble
TO her. When she goes out to walk
she must have something to hold in it.
otherwise she knows not what to do
with it. No wonder she is ready to
give 1T away at the first opportu-
nifty.
People along the Sacramento river.
IN Sutter county. are actively engaged
IN building and repairing levees. i'm an
ticipation of the winter rains. At
Shanghai bend 240 men and 14O teams
are at work, and about 100000 will be
expended.
These moonlight nights are glorious.
isn't it heavenly" said Miss silly
billy to Mr.. Polo. "What?" he asked.
"Why, the moon" ooh, yes, just to
utterly heavenly" "Oh, / do just dote
on the moon, don't you?" Eyes, its
awfully nice, isn't it, and so splendidly
conspicuous, too"
To give some idea of the extent of
the spool-thread business, it is estimat-
ed that 20,000,000 dozen spools, or
24O,O0O,O0O spools of six-cOrd thread.
were sold last year, besides all three
cord makes, and the 500 and 2.400
yard spools that are put up for manu-
featuring purposes. Two hundred
yards to the spool is the popular meas
ure in the United States, while in Eng
land spools vary, some having 90, 9TH
ers 100,, 800, 500, and so on.
The steamer Malabar arrived at New
York, few days since, from the Phil
ippine islands with a cargo of 1925
tons of sugar. This is said to be the
first steamer that has ever come from
the Philippine islands to the United
States, and she brings what is declared
to be the largest cargo of sugar ever
imported into the United States from
any country. The cargo has been sold
for about 100000 to well-known
sugar reiner The cargo will pay a
duty to the government of about 1925.
0Ce.
This heroic cure of snake bite is pub
lished by Mrs. Mary A. Mansfield in the
Sanford On. c. Journal: my son
James and Mr.. c. w. Thigpen were
out on hunt on Sept. %, when James
was bitten on the leg, below the knee,
by a very large rattlesnake. Being
five miles from home, he bound cord
tight above the wound, and then split
his leg to the bone right at the wound
After bleeding about pint he stopped
the bleeding, put a charge of powder
on the wound and touched it off with
a match, which burned the flesh to a
scar around the wound. All he has to
do now is to cure the burn"
Cheyenne transporter. [volume] (Darlington, Indian Terr.) 1879-1886, 1881-11-25

1t is stated that smaller amount of fish
is consumed in the United States in pro-
portion TO the number Of inhabitants than
In any slvilizsa country in the world.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-03-30
lat.tastcr fntelligenrer.
WEDNESDAY EvEN'a. MAR. 30, 1881
His Hale old Age Ascribed to Salt.

HIS Hale OlQ Age AScrlUtu " SSlts
Lorenzo A. Pickles, of Newfane, ped
dies trees throughout western New York.
He is 20 years old, and measures six feet
and five inches in height. He has thir-
teen sisters and eight brothers and he is
tho smallest of the entire family. One
brother, who lives in Kentucky, is seven
feet two and ond half inches in height, and
weighs 275 pounds, although he is spare
in flesh. The littleSt sister is six feet five
and One-haH inches. The family is scat
tered, no two living in the same state.
Lorenzo Pickles has the appearance of a
man of 40. He never wears a coat, and
goes without stockings winter and sum-
mer. He has two pupils in each eye. To
distinguish objects close by, Mr.. Pickles
uses powerful magnifying glasses. He
can read print and zee things at a greater
distance, without the aid of glasses, than
it is possible for persons with the natural
eye to see.
He never tasted liquor Of any kind in
his life aud never drinks water. Three
small cups of tea a day, winter and sum-
mer suffice to quench Mr.. Pickles thirst.
lie never eats fresh meat. His chief ar
ticlc of diet is salt pork. although he likes
salt meats and fish He eats two table
spoonsful of salt every day and prefers
salt to sugar in his tea. Pie and cake or
sweetmeats Of any kind he never tasted.
lie says he believes his hale aud hearty
condition is due mainly to the salt he
uses. Mr.. Pickles is widOwer, but he
has two daughters. One is II years old,
the other IL. The oldest is 6 feet and
half an inch tall. The youngest is ) feet
inches, aud their father says they are
both still growing.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-03-30
BungS.
Some Facts About their Manufacture and
What They are Made or.

Some Facts About their Manufacture and
What They are Made VI.
The hung is homely device, lacking
altogether the symmetry of all Obelisk and
having little even of the grace which corks
often possess. But its uses are of a most
important kind, and wherever liquids are
contained in casks and barrels there must
the bung be also.
1t is almost impossible to estimate the
quantity Of bungs made and used annually.
but tho number is well up in the millions.
They are made OF wood well seasoned, and
are cut by machinery which is patented.
In no country are SO many bungs made as
in the United States, for nowhere else are
tho woods which are used SO plenti-
full. Cak, hickory, spruce and pine are
among the varieties utilized, and the bung
factories are scattered about the country
in the neighborhoOds where the woods
used are found. BY cutting the bungs
before shipping the cost of transporting
the waste material is saved. A great
many bungs for beer casks are sent both
to Germany and England from this coun-
try, not because they are better, but
because they are cheaper than those made
abyoad. Bungs are cut by peculiar
and ingenious machinery, which
works against the grain of the
wood, tapering the bung with the
grain. In many cases the taper is made
but slight in the cutting, and then the
bung is submitted to a powerful compress
sion to increase the taper.
Bungs of ale and beer barrels arc Of !:
standard size, measuring II inches, while
bungs for oil barrels are inches. Whisky
barrel bungs are used over and over again.
Beer and oil barrel bunss are always pick
cd out, because hammering the slaves to
start the bungs is sure to injure the coat
ing of the barrels.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-03-30

1,SrArE OF JOHN N. GOOD, LATE OF
II the City OF Lancaster, deeeased..The un-
hsisnce remaining In the hands Of samuel
Worst, administrator OF the estate Of John NJ.
GOOD, deceased, to and anong those legally
IN TTESDA DAY the 18th day Of APRIL, 1851. at
O'clock D. IN. In the Library Room Of the Court
TCnae IN the CITY of Lancaster. where all pct
sora Interested In said distribution may at
eorS SAMUEL H. PRICE,
c1raa ltdoaw Auditor.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-03-30
Bogus Certliicates.

1t is no vile drusgcd stuff, pretending to be
made of wonderful foreign roots. barks, &C..
and pu1feI up by long bogus certificates, OF
pure, effective medicine. made of well known
valuable remedies, that furnishes it's own cr
tificateS by its cures. We refer to Hop Bitters
the purcst and best OF medicines See
- Truths and "Provcrbs,' in another
column" ml52wd&w
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-03-30
How 70 (s0t Well

Thousands of persons are constantly troubled
with "A combination OF diseases. Diseased kill
news and coStivc bowels are their tornentOrs.
They should know that kiuHc:W Ort acts on
these organs at the same time, causing them
to throw OF the pOiSunS that have cloSSca
them. and so renewing the whole man. Hun
'lreds testify to this.-fiEsbnrgh Post.
ms IWttSw
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-03-30

ESTATE OF CATHARINE KRENTZ,
Il late of the city Of Lancaster, deceased
Letters testamentary on said estate hav-
ing been granted to the undersigned, all
make immediate payment, and those having
claims or demands against the same, will pre-
snt them without delay tor settlement to the
undersigned, residing in Lancaster city: No.
646 Manor Street. PETER kRENTL,
r. DoNNELLY, Attorney. Exector.
No. 400 West King street. ml0St'oaw