River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1881-05-05
IN A NUTSHELL.

| A faint pocket book never won fair
lady.
The telephone has developed an en-
tirely new school of hello-cution. Phil
adelpitid Bulletin
The present debt of Tennessee is
about twenty-seven millions, mostly in
CURED on account of railroads.
"Our rooms are small, " said she, but
live in my husband" Eyes" said
her friend, Il see you live in fiat"
A woman has been arrested in New
York for abducting little boy. Next
time she'll know enough to take a big
one.
1t is said that Col. Thomas A. Scott,
OF Philadelphia, is worth about twenty
millions. But his health is hopelessly
lost
A French couple, recently arrived in
Putnam, Conn, have four albino chill
dren, with pink eyes and white hair
and skin.
Alice Tilton, daughter of Theodore
and Elizabeth, is bright, pretty young
lady Of %, but looks only II. She is
studying art IN Parls.
The Prussian Prince William has
been obliged to decline 5000 wedding
presents. Oh, General Grant, you're
not adapted to royalty. Boston Post.
The Burlington Hawkege man has
studied the question of free ships long
enough to become convinced that ''if
We could kill off all of our statesmen
tbis oo,,ptrv voi1ld crou, -
In Paris, Mr.. Bennett, of the New
York Herald, who lives over there most
of his time, is known as 'Si' James
Gordon Bennett, the American noble
man"
An unprincipled being, needless that
he wrecks the happiness of half the
women of England, writes to the Lon
don papers that it is unlucky to have
peacock's feathers in the house.
A New York man has discovered an
invisible soap" 1t is the same ar
ticle that small boys have used in their
morning additions from the most re-
mote periods.
Whenever a local politician gets
little hungry, he rushes off to Washing
ton with the information that the post
office in his town is badly managed. :
New II rem Register.
"You are fraud, sir When j
bought this horse from you you assur-
ed me that he hadn't a fault. Why,
sir, he's stone blind" Vender-"I
know he is but don't consider that a
fault. / call it misfortune.
Vennor says the winter of 1882 prom
ises to be open and generally mild.
This is some consolation. However,
the citizens Of this country can stand
most any kind of weather now.
A walnut desk which once belonged
to Washington has been discovered in
a secondhand furniture store in Staun-
ton, Va. An inscription shows that it
was presented in 1776 to Washington
by Mr.. Webster.
Perhaps the most remarkable rarity
in photographed literature ever sold
under the hammer in this country was
Guttenberg's first Bible, which was the
first book printed on movable type. 1t
was sold recently, a purchaser paying
IS, 900 for it.
The circus manager who advertised
for the handsomest woman in the
United States has chosen from among
the applicants Louise Montague. She
is II singer in variety show, beauty
of the brunette type, and favorite
of the Bowery youths. She will repre-
sent LaIla Rookh in street pageant.
A students lamp exploded in Au-
gusta, Me, last Thursday evening
while an attempt was being made to
regulate the flame, and the Journal of
that city says that this kind of lamp is
getting to be about as deadly as a bomb
in the hands of an irresponsible Mini
list
A private writer from the Sandwich
Islands describes Mauna Loa in opera
ton, and says that a stream of molten
lava five or six miles wide and ten
miles long was pouring from the
crater Mr.. Freneaux, of Boston, was
painting views of the volcano.
In the portion Of London known as
The City" the electric light is to be
used ON the streets i'll the place of gas,
at cost of $40, 900 year The three
gstems-Siemans Brush and Jabloch-
koff-are to be tested for year.
A crusty old bachelor up town met Il
woman on a bad crossing the other
day, and she crowded him clear out
into the mud. He writes to this de-
partment, saying: as it any reason
because a man is man that woman
should be hog p We refuse to an
swer this ungallant question, and advise
him to ask the woman herself.-Steu
benujlle Herald
1t is noticeable that in the dispatches
announcing The arrival of Coleman,
the mansion house plotter, at New
York, it was stated that latter going
quietly up the street about Il block
Coleman and his companion stepped
quickly into saloon" There can be
no doubt that Coleman is real Fen
ian.
THE Ke~ motor has come again to
he front \ public exhibition was
given recently in Philadelphia, Com
mander Gorringe and others being pre-
sent. The machine is described as an
odd looking collection of globes and
tubes, consisting of generators and
engine. A glass of water poured into
halI Il dozen Handicapped tubes pro-
duced IN twenty-nine seconds pressure
equal to 1900 pounds to the square
inch. This force applied to the engine
caused rapid motion controlled by
touching an iron disk or drawing bow
over tightly stretched wire. The ex-
pertinent, it is said, was satisfactory to
the specialists present, and the public
asks for particulars.
I