davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
A VICTIM OF COINCIDENCE.
The MAN Who Never Helped Elect n
President Who Did Not Die in
New York Herald.

New York Herald.
A merchant of this city, who has
taken part in the presidential elections
of the last forty years, has had the
singular misfortune to vote for the four
presidents who died in office-Harri-
son, Taylor, Lincoln, and Garfield
and never have Endorsed any other sue
cessful candidate. Hearing Of this
strange experience, reporter went to
him for its confederation. He said
II have always been q whig and re-
publican, and voted for Henry Clay,
who was beaten. In 1910 l voted for
Harrison, and he died in Office.
In 1874 I voted against Polk,
who was elected. In 1848 l voted for
Taylor, who also died in office. That
was the first coincidence, but l never
thought much about it. In 1892 l
voted against Pierce and he got through
all right In 1860 I voted the fusion
ticket as against Lincoln. l believed
at that time that the slavery in the
south was domestic institution with
which the north had no right to inter
fere. changed my mind when l saw
what the southerners were doing, and
in 1864 l voted for Lincoln, who was
assassinated. This happening to the
third successful candidate I had voted
for rather staggered me. In 1868 l
declined to.vote at all-not because |
was superstitious, but because did not
want to support Grant and l would not
vote for democrat. In 1872 had
moved my residence to New Jersey,
and was not entitled to vote that
year. In 1876 lost my vote, too, and
in 1880 l told my friends that l did not
want to vote for Garfield, for if l did
he would either be defeated or would
lose his life in Office. They insisted
upon my doing SO, however, and it
looked like such close thing that |
was finally persuaded and voted for
Garfield. Now ne is dead, and l never
will vote for another president, if | live
to be a thousand years DID,"
"And you are not superstitious ?"
"No. SIR" the merchant replied, with
some asperity, "but it is a very strange
series of condolences, and | don't
want to prolong it. Now, | want you
to promise me that You will not pub
lish my name."
"fll do it il you will promise never
to vote for me for president" replied
the reporter, and the compact was set
tied.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

. 4
A scholar IN one of Binghampton's
public schools who had "been over to
the map Of Asia" was reviewed by his
teacher, with the following result:
Teacher -"What is geography"
Scholarly big book"
Teacher-aWhat 10 the earth COM
posed of"
Scholar Mud"
Teacher No; land and water"
Scholar -"Well, that makes mud,
don't it,"
Teacher '.what is the shape Of the
earthl"
Scholar Flat"
feacber-ssYou know better. If
should dig . hole through the earth,
where would / como outl"
Scholar Out Of the hole. Burling
tn Haphsys.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
The FIRST Mormon Marriage.

The first celestial marriage occur.
red by stealth, on the banks of the
Mississippi, near Nauvoo, III. Joseph
Smith SEALED" to James Noble second
wife. Mobiles first wife soon died of a
broken heart, and the second wife went
insane and also died. When Smith
married Noble, the latter also married
Smith to a second wife. The first Mrs.
Smith chung to the prophet until mob
killed him, and then married Gentle,
and at last accounts was still living at
Nouv' 0. In defense of polygamy the
examples of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob,
Moses, Joshua, David and Solomon are
cited. In confederation of the "Book
Of Mormon" we are pointed to the
burned cities of Palenvue and Uxmal,
in Central America; to the mounds in
the Mississippi valley, and to other well
known vestiges of a prehistoric race.
When good Mormon dies, who has
"ived up to his religion" and has had
q dozen or two wives and fifty or sixty
children, he does not become mere
angel, like an ordinary Christian-he
becomes god, with world of his own
to reign over A Mormon wife who OPP
poses the polygamous marriage of her
husband goes to hell and is destroyed"
A Mormon who obeys the mandates OF
the church in most respects, but neg
lects to Ego into polygamy," becomes
mere angel, who must be a kind Of
celestial servant to the gods and other
angels. His wife must share the same
humiliating fate. The doctrine oil
"blood atonement" is simply this II
an apostles throat is cut, the spilling
of the blood upon the ground will save
his soul. If he is left to die a natural
death his soul will 60 to hell. A great
many apostate souls have been saved in
Utah. This, in substance, is the Nor.
mon religion.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

Iowa, on the DIST OF December last Twos So;,oa
WIN sudden attack OF neuralgia in The chest
giving me eNcruciatlng pain AMI almost nrry,..ii
ing breathing My pulse, usually NJ, Eel to "
intense nausea of the stomach succeeded and n
coid cammy sweat covered my entire body,
Inc attending physician could do nothing to re-.
lieve me. After suffering ftr three hours I
thought as had been using ST J,coGs on. with
good effect for rheumatic pains would try il.
cover my chest with the Oil. and applicdit. The
relief was almost Instantaneous. In one hour /
was entirely free from pain. and would have
taken the Train to I'll. an app ointment that night
in neighbAring town hni my friends moi dis
suadcdmc. As it was, ltookihc night train urlny
home. III st. Louis, AMI have not been troubled
since.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

For Homeopathic Medicines only
one centennial medal was awarded at
Philadelphia, and that to Boericke &
Tafel, established in business since 1885.
Their Chicago establishment is at IS
Clark st. They make a specially Of
Medicine Cases and books for family
use, and for veterinary treatment. Send
for descriptive price list.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
TO CONsulMPTlyES.

potent Alternative or blood cleasning remedy, that
wins golden opinions from all who use it for any
humor, from the common pimple, blotch or erup-
ton, to the formidable scrofulous swelling, or
ulcer. Internal fever, soreness and liberation,
yield to its benign influences. Consumption,
which is but scrofulous affection of the lungs
of this God given remedy See article on cos-
sumption and its treatment in Part III OF the
World Dspeusary Dime Series of pamphlets
costs two stamps, st-paid. Address WoRLp's
DIspENsARy MEDICAL ASSOCIATION, Buffalo,
n Y
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
Long, luxurious Wraps. which are l.

Long, luxurious wraps, which are 10
envelop the wearer from head to foot,
are now exhibited. Many of these
have plush collars which cover the
shoulders, and are lined throughout
with the same fabric Among the eve
ming wraps is one of white brocaded
satin, trimmed with feather trimming,
and lined with mauve-tinted satin.
Another quaint style is Mother Hub
bard wrap of palest yellow plush, lined
with bright Oriental brocade, and a
third, of white stamped velvet, is lined
with crimson-watered silk.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

The stocks at JAMES MoRGANs 1856
and 1888 East Water street, Milwaukee,
are constantly being supplemented.
He has just received New Dress Goods,
New Shawls, Blankets, Flannels, Ho-
siery, &c. In Dolmans and Cloaks his
trade is immense.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
JOAQUIN Miller writes a most nernl

Joaquin Miller writes most perplex.
ing hand, in which all the letters are
made in pretty much the same way
and most of them are omitted. And
maybe this accounts for his poetry.
Tie printer sets up what he pleases and
then lays it off on Joaquin.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
white man now i

A white man now living in Ebert
County, S G., was BACKED up once by
companion in slavery times, and sold
as a slave in Charleston for 5000. The
next day he washed off the color, es-
capped and received halfof the purchase
money!
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
ST.. MAnY's. O., Jan. 20. 1879.

Mrs. John ODonnell, down for four or five
years with consumption--very worst stage of it.
was in bed for II weeks, and could not get up.
She commenced on Piso's Cure for Consumption
and is now up and improving rapidly, by using
only four bottles. "Piso's Cure" is performing
wonderful cures, and giving the utmost satisfac-
ton. Gus MoRyIIIus,
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
LADY VA Ms TO X VOW

the latest Partisan style Of dress and bonnet; a
new way to arrange the hair. Millions are ex-
pended for artificial appliances which only make
conspicuous the fact that emaciation, nervous de-
bilty, and female weakness exist. Dr. Pierce's
"Favorite Prescription" is sold under positive
guarantee. IF used as directed art can be dis
pensed with 1t will overcome these diseases pc.
culiar to females. BY druggists.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
WEATHER--OR NOT,

We admire the philosophy of tho unrortppo,,
man. who, when everything had been swan,
away said, Well, there'l be weather ana n,y,r n
lett ut any rate" Alas! weather is the "vaiInIs
dog OF al subjects; everyone thinks II w.
special right 20 tiy 10 better the weather or M,
iurls his aiinthemas against "Ot Probabiliti"n. '
ana hs WI who cna Tnn !" assist him in regulating
from Prof ricc, Of st, Louis, No. the rrnnwtas
meieorologist and weather prophet o! tho Wnse,'
II does not discuss the weather but som.tht.ht
surely OF molr Importance 10 those whn s,'mrS
with That painful m,lady he speaks Of, oouNer
day after Concluding my lectures at Burno, ne
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

Mr.. George |. Seney, of New York,
who has given away so much money
for educational and philanthropic pur,
poses the last two or three years, is the
son of q Methodist preacher.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

DIR. Helen Webster, Professor of
Anatomy and Physiology and resident
physician at Vassar College for eight
years, has resigned and resumed her
medical practice at New Bedford. Mass.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
WHAT. saVH6 - 1:aTxrn

W orkmgmen VIII economize by employing DR..
Pierce's Medicines. HIS Pleasant Purgative
Pellets" and Golden Medical Discovery" cleanse
the blood and system thus preventing fevers and
other serious diseases. and curing all scrofulous
and other humors. Sold by druggists.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

The Des Moines Qowa) Tn- Weekly
Tribune says: "a Harrisburg, Pa,
journal mentions that Mr.. d. Bensinger,
No. 4 Market Square, that city, was
cured by St. Jacobs Oil Of violent at.
tack of rheumatism"
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

III dote upon that gill; said Smith
"That makes the twentieth girl you
have dotted on within q month";" re-
marked Henderson. 1T is about time
you had sown all your wild dotes,
Smith,"
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

LADY BEAuTIFIERs.- Ladies, you cannot
make fair skin, rosy checks and sparkling eyes
with all the cosmetics of France, or beautiiers of
the world while in poor health, and nothing will
give you such rich blood, good health, strength
and beauty as Hop Biters A trial is certain
proof
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

Ho, YE BALDHEADs!-There is Just one way,
and no more, by which you may be cured-use
CAROLINE, a deodorized extract of petroleum.
II will positively produce new hair; there is no
substitute for this marvellous petroleum hair re-
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
How 10 Secure Health.

It seems strange that any one will suffer from de-
engagements brought on by impure blood, when SEQ
yes Sarsaparilla and sllingia will restore health to
the physical organization. Is pleasant to take and
the best blood purifier ever discovered curing scrof.
Ia Weakness Of the Kidneys, Erysipeas, Malaria all
Nervous disorders, Debility Bilious complaints, and
Skin, etc. AS health remover 1t acts like charm.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

Z 20 will ~ Al yOu 4 o0AA MO viz os'u
tiously, with the characteristic Eeadl-
.nesa Of her ser; chow are they to know
We hain't city folks? never wore this
gown but once before, an my bunnit is
.spick span new - when Samanthy put
il on the tree for me tibet Christmas;
"a, you know right we'll yougot them
clokhes new, out Of the store, this very |
day. Folks cah tell they are new by
the folds" she proudly added.
Simon had been busily examining
the opera-glass, ard good Amelia
worldliness had not affected the old
man very much, for he musingly spoke,
- lie turned the glass over and around:
Il seen the place where they was
lsSiyin ,em sway, down stairs, when We
come II"
''Giyin' 'em away, indeedl A pretty
lot they was givin' 'em away!
reckon Ell they had been, I'd . heo
share" We believed her. 'gThey
was sellin' EN-" she asserted, as if she
knew fora certainty, Il listened mighty
sharp" .e 4
Poor Simon. he had turned. and
twisted and shaken the opera-glass un-
til he struck the happy medium that
: suited his eyes. Be it known that IL
WAS wholly an accident, however, as
he had come 70 the conclusion that
they were not good for much, but he
4 70 dreaded to hear the voice Of his
lady, assuring him that nothing was
the matter, only he didn't know how, ;,
that he kept on fussing until the happy
IA a~OtIAs.k ncaerrrn1 Aftn~ = ~, -
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

DE-. ROGERS VEGETABLE WORM SYRUP instantly
destroys and removes all the secretons which
cause them
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

"Indsey's Blood Searcher" enriches the blood
drives out all disease, and will give you excellent
health
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

BAKERS lPAIN PANACEA cures pain IN Man and
Beast. Use externally and internally.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03

The new President pro tom. of the Son.
ate weighs nearly 400 pounds.
The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1881-11-03
REAL AND FALSE.

They were at the theater. They con-
sisted of On elderly farmer and his old
fashioned wife. We were-well, it does
not matter VINO we were; suffice 1t to
say, we were all there for the same pur-
pose, as well as several hundred others
who thronged the house. The drama to
be produced was the passionate love
tragedy of Romeo and Juliet, and the
part of the fair Juliet was to be taken
by young and beautiful lady, who
made her debut that evening.
We Immediately learned from the
conversation of our farmer couple, that
he was Simon and she was Amelia. He
seemed one Of these slow, good-natured
men. whom we often meet and seldom
dislike: while she was evidently the ma
ior-general of the Amelia Simon firm.
Her nose and chin we're pointed, and
she carried an air of decided authority
about her. She had comely face in
dicating excellent sense, but the con-
trast between her appearance and that
of meek Simon was striking. These
good people have evidently been unac-
customed to the theater, and the con-
versation and criticisms that passed
between them were novel and enter
tanning. We will not attempt to give
their conversation verbatim, as it would
fill small book.
The drop-curtain, hiding the stage,
represented an emigrant train crossing
the plains. Amelia's eyesight was still
good. ;,
"What a lot o'wagons all in a row."
she remarked, as she gazed at the paint
ing, land under 'em it says '49. reck-
on ther must be forty-nine on 'em;
who'd o thought ther was tibet many !.
~ can't see 'em," meekly responded
Simon, with a crestfallen countenance.
claw, sakes can't you though?
What pity now you didn't fetch your
specks. Jes like you. How'd you spect
to see anything without 'em. Your
eyesight want never so good as mine,
nohow," she complacently added.
ssThat's so, mother" he said.
He looked 80 uncomfortable, that we
leaned over, and Offering an opera glass,
said:
'Take this, sir; it may enable you to
see.''
Amelia turned upon us q quick,
searching glance, and then scrutinizing
the glass sharply, and raising no objec-
tons, she looked the fact to her obedi
ent spouse, who taking it awkwardly,
said in q blunt manner
ell, now,I hold thet's right clever;
thought these folks were all on 'em
too stuck up to speak to country folks,
Let. alone handin' this ERE thing to look
, 1881-02-11
Lacrosse.

In st. Nicholas We find an article de-
scribing lacrosse, the Indian pastime
which has become the national game of
Canada and which is every year becom-
ing more popular. The maga2inist says:
Lacrosse is played on level grassy
field like a base ball ground. The
things used in game are rubber ball,
about eight inches in circumference,
four light poles or hag-staiis, each about
six feet long, and bat or crosse for
each player. The field for boys game
should he about one hundred and thirty
yards long, and about forty yards wide,
The four poles are in pairs, and should
have flags at the top III cOlors say, two
in blue, and two in white. The two
poles Of pair are set up in the ground
about six feet apart, the white flags ut
one end of the field and the blue at the
other, the two "colors" being about one
hundred and twenty yards apart. These
form the goals, and the players should
wear some kind of cap or uniform in the
same colors as the goals, say half the
players in white caps or shirts. and half
In blue. The poles and flags can be
made at home, the bats cost about one
dollar each, and auy good rubber sponge
ball may be used
The game is led by two captains Sc
lected from all the boys, and to decide
disputes, there may be also two umpires.
Each captain, beginning with the eldest,
takes turns in selecting his team from all
| the boys, each choosing twelve, making
twenty six in the game. The two cap
tains do not play, and have no bats; their
duty is to start the game, to look after
their sides, to watch the ball, and tell
their own players what to do. The UNI
pires merely look on from the edge Of
the field, one near each goal. The senior
captain places his men in this order; first
one in front of the opposite goal, second
one short distance in advance of him,
third still further in advance, and n
fourth at the center OF the field AT the
home goal he also places one man, few
yards in advance of the flags,
The remaining players are placed at the
sides of the third and fourth boys. Then
the other captain does the same thing,
and the field is filed by the twenty.four
players in pairs, except two on each side.
Thus, the two sides are distributed over
the entire field. The rules of the game
say there must be no kicking nor pulling
to get at the ball, nor must it be once
touched by the hands. The game is to
start the ball from the center, and to
throw it between the blue flags. Each
side tries its best to defend its own color.
and to get the ball into the enemys goal.
A player may pick the ball up on his
crosse, or catch it on the fly, or the re-.
bound, and he may, if he can, run with
it on the crosse and ihrow it into the
| goal,
, 1881-02-11
A MiIk-White. PInk.Eyed Raven.

Scarcely less rare than black tulip, O
red-haird negro or four leaved sham
rock, is tho amazing natural curiosity
now being exhibited in the Berlin Aqua
rum, to the material augmentation OF
that admirable institutions daily re-
ceipts. A milk-white raven, with pale
pink eyes and red legs, received admis-
sion week ago to the great central
aviary in which scores of beautiful birds
hutter and chirp and build their nests in
comparative freedom, but his presence
there spread such general panic among
the remaining inmates Of the rOliere that
it has been found necessary to remove
him to a separate cage. Strangeas as it may
seem, the other birds instinctively recog.
nized that this corvine albino was alb.
normal, and therefore terrible. Many
Of them became total abstainers from
food and drink through sheer fright
while he shared their quarters, and hud
died together, shivering, at as great q
distance from their fearful anomaly as
the limits of their prison would permit
them to attain. In all respects. save his
extraordinary hues, the raven is as other
ravens. His appetite is apparently insa-
table, and he ministers to it with a for
midable beak. Neither in tone nor in
delivery is there any unsual mellowness
about his croak. His pink eyes could
not be more steadfastly engaged in con.
templating the main chance where they
as yellow as FURNISHED gold. He was
found, with brood OF coal-black broth
ers and sisters, in nest built by his
parents-whose surprise at his peculiar
appearance must have been considerable
ON the topmost branch OF an old tree
in the Georgenthal, valley in Thurin-
gen. Double an anachronism, this snow
white raven is at present one of the
"lions" of the German capital.
, 1881-02-11
nome Produce Market.

The following quotations represent the whole
sale rates from producers or first hands;
FL0UR-Standard brar ds "a 80; best country
brands, "a O0@A so, superiine, 50 800
So SO.
WOOL-valley 22@ 27c. Eastern Oregon 200 %
WHEAT-Good to choice, 81 80 as IS.
HAY-Timothy baled, buying at SlS@s2O pei
PoTATJEs-Quotable at &c per n market slut
MIDDLINGs-Jobbing at feed, 5000 $25; fine
S25@$27! p ton.
BRAS-Jobbing at per ton, Sl4@Sl5.
OATs--Feed, per bushe 42l@45 cts.
BACON-Sides, lic; hams, Oregon l2iGy
l4c; Eastern, l46y l5c; shoulders, 100 l2c
LARD--ln kegs, u; in tins, l3c
BUTTER-We quote choice dairy at 35a3TlG
good fresh roll, S2@35 ordinary, 27@
32lc, whether brine or roll
DRIED FRUlTS-Apples, sun dried, ga 9ci
machine dried, l2!c Pears, machine dried
llal2c. Plums, machine dried, l3@l &c
EGGs--20c per doz.
p0ULTRY-Hens and roosters, S4a4 75 Tur.
keys l4al6c per pound. Geese, SSa9 per doz
CHEESE-0regon, l5!al6c; California, l6c,
HOGS--Dressed, 6Gy6!c; on foot, 4G45Oc.
BEEF-Lire weight, q to 2ic for good to choice
SHEEP-Lve weight, 2lc gross.
TALLOW--Quotable at 5!c.
HIDES-The market is firm at l6c for first clasa
dry; los! !c for green; culls, one.third off.