The Emporia weekly news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1881-1889, 1881-09-08
HERE AND THERE.

The coolest weather ever experienced
by white men was 20 degrees below zero.
The boisterous silence of DR. Ham
moud during the past week has not e.
capped the attention of the public.
Professor TryndalI. the prayer test
man, is said to read the bulletins from
the White House with eager intererest
Bliss says the bullet is travelling
around. This leaves Hammond the
mournfui alternative of declaring that
it is encysted. -. .-z-s.z----------=,
Chicago probably bases her reputation
as summer resort upon the "fine slay.
ing'' which seems at present to be one of
the leading attractions OF that city.
1t is said that common four-barrel
will hold 67s,9O0 silver dollars. We
will cheerfully furnish the barrel if any
ofour opulent readers desire to test the ac-
curacy Of this statement.
There is a smart woman in Texas
She was told by tin peddler that if she
bought one of his burners she would
save half of the kerosene. She told him
she would take two and save it all.
Mr.. VennOr is paying visit TO WASH
ington this week. He manifests great
discretion in selecting time when he
has reason to know that popular indig-
nation is all conferred upon Guiteau-
The only conclusive evidence of
Guiteau's mental infirmity is found in
the fact that he once had a newspaper
scheme on foot out of which he expected
to realize an income of $250,O00 year.
Austin, Texas, has female deputy
sheriff. AS she was appointed upon the
recommendation of her son-in-law, there
can be no question as TO her courage and
her general fitness for that responsible
position.
L If a man declares himself to be
SO thoroughly religious that he has not
committed sin for twenty years, it is
very rational 10 infer that he does not
regard lying as transgression of the
divine law.
Chicago is to have natitorium, or q
public laVatory for ladies. This long
needed convenience will enable the
bellies of that city to battle their feet
without travelling three or four miles to
reach the lake.
1t is stated upon excellent authority
that prophet is not without honor save
in his own country. If this rule holds
good in the case of Vennor there must
be stalwart public sentiment in Cana.
da against lynch law.
The editor who was rash enough to
declare that there were no professional
beauties will be probably interested in
learning that DIR. Mary Walker made
an investment the other day in two raw
hides and navy revolver.
/ New York has law which prevents a
man from sending his wife back to her
parents for support. In the light of
this revelation MIR. Tilden's deep-rooted
aversion to matrimony will no longer
continue to excite popular surprise.
The mistake of Captain Howgate in
| devoting his talents to the signal service
instead of obtaining position as cashier
in some metropolitan savings bank is
becoming daily more apparent. His
ENLIGHTENMENT now foots up over 800.
0Oe.
The Carson Appeal is authority fol
the statement that Nevada florist has 6
sunflOwer which is fifteen inches in di
ameter or nearly four feet in circum
| ference. We have often observed thai
there is corresponding luxuriance be
tween the liars and the vegetation of thu
Great West.
Olive Logan says that English doctor:
are SO scrupulOus about "professiona
ethics" that she heard considerable com
ment in London recently because DR.
Austin Flint's baggage was marked con
spicuously with his name and address
his English professional brethren deem
ing it an indirec: advertisement.
The season at the fashionable watering
places is about over, and the dukes anC
counts who have been the reigning sen
sations at those popular resorts are pre-
pairing to resume the lucrative and dig
nifled avocations of selling patent &c
ment and removing corns and bunionl
without pain or Inconvenience to thei
| patrons.
The anguish with which one reads
in London papers that DIR. Tanner hal
suffered an unromantic and inglorioul
death by falling down flight of stair
in Amsterdam is augmented by the an
nouncement that he is at the presen
moment in excellent health and train
ing for another fast. How the report o
his death in the Dutch metropolis arigi
mated does not appear. but 1t is sur
missed that some unworthy cOmpatrio
of the great faster, with q morbid pas
sion for notority, has been Haunting
bogus laurels of voluntary starvation
along the canals.
pPpCnNAT Ann nor TTT0AT