The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1881-06-28
A magazine article asks: !

"a mSSdZlue alttCiO dshs.
Have women In,uitions 2"
That depends. If intuitions are FASH
ionable this year, ana cost from $40 to
$50, it is safe TO wager that great
many women have them.
Ameditative man was running through
an anatomical museum, and came across
the skeleton OF a donkey.
.Ah," he said in reverential awe,as he
adjusted his green spectacle, eve are in.
deed fesriully and wonderfully made"
A clergyman, being annoyed BY some
of his audience going out while he was
preaching, took for his text, "Thou art
weighed and found wanting" Soon az
ter commencing bis discourse he said,
"You will please pass out as fast as you
are weighed"
Lesson in natural philosophy (which
is the more delicate sense, feeling or
sight2" asked a professor. "Feeling,'
responded student. "Give proof OF
|i,, with an example," "Well, my cbum
can feel his mustache, but nobody else
can see It," responded the student.
A famous surgeon advises one Of his
patients to undergo an. operation. SIS
it very severe ?" asks the patient. "'Not
for the patient" says the doctor; "we
put him TO sleep but very hard on the
operator" "How 30 ?" eve suffer ter
ribl, from anxiety. just think, it only
succeeds once in hundred times"
A physician who had been in : atten-
papce on . patient known as,avery hard
case, was met one morning by q neigh.
Dor as he was coming from the sick
mans house, who asked "How is your
patient, doctor2 Is he out Of danger7''
well, no" hesitalingly answered the
doctor. she's dead. but I'm afraid he's
ar from being out OF danger N5f-i
Charles Fox and his friend Mr.. Hare,
10th much incommoded by duns, were
together in house, when, seeing some
shabby men about the door, they were
afraid they were bailiffs in search of
them. Not knowing which was in dan
ger, Fox opened the window, and cal.
ling to them. said: "Pray, gentlemen. are
you Fox-hunting or Hare hunting ?"
"Courtesy opens many DOORS" says
the old adage.
"This may be true, as far as it goes, "
says commentator; e'but you might
stand before bank-buildiug and court.
esy till your spinal column'was as timber
as an old postage stamp, yet the doors
wouldn't swing back on their hinges
worth q cent" II M
Did you ever notice how things get
in your way when you are In hurry
A Boston woman told her husband that
runaway horse was going by. He
| jumped so quick he sprained his knee
and in his frantic haste fell over two
chairs and skinned his shins, stepped or
the dog, upset the table with books and
a drop light on it, ran against his wifi
and hurt her, and got to the window
just as they were stopping the horse two
blocks away, round the corner.
! A physician having duel on hi
hands requests two OF his friends to ar
range with his adversary the hour OF lh,
meeting. SNAKE it tomorrow, he said
"but not in the forenoon, because I mus
visit four patients before going to tn,
grounds" We
81 see, murmurs one of the seconds
"he wants to get his hand in. ~
"Yes," said witness, 81 remembe
the defendant's mother crying on tn
occasion referred to. She was weepin,
With her left eye--the only one she ha
and the tears were running down he
, right cheek"
what" exclaimed the Judge, "Ho,
could that be 2"
"0iease, your honor, "said the witness
I"she was avfully cross.eyed."