Connecticut western news., 1881-04-20

sometimes what we arc coming to and whether there is not threat in the air of disruption of this sacred social order-hberty running to license, love driven from her throne by lust and this new world of ours threatened with ruin through the vileness which destroyed the old. It is natural also to try and l find where the reason lies for these appalling evils, which do not merely threaten us, but are on us, and whether they may not be met.
 FITNESS FOR EACH OTHER.
 l It is not possible for man and wo- man when they marry to make sure they are to be true husband and wife at the risk of the usual pains and penal ties; that ought not to be deemed un- reasonable. Is it not possible to make this beautiful law of our life-the true 8 woman and tor the woman man, who will be true counterparts, and that they shall know this in some true way, or else they shall not marry because with out such fitness of each for the other | the license and the minister's blessings will be mere farce, if it be not very | dark tragedy? ? I cannot but believe there is such @ safeguard ; a true light l about this, as there is about justice and honor and honesty, and that we can hardly go wrong, if we ourselves are honest and honorable and fai about this most essential step i'll our whole human life. When marriage brings misery, as 3 rule, we can trust it is not by Gods providence, but by our own improvi- dence. l mention this as the first rea- son why troubles come which never can be fairly met, and worthy young men and women get so badly Ilismated tha the whole habit of young people towardt each other before they marry is @ habit of summary deception. They set them selves to deceive the very elect when they are in each others company by putting on an appearance which is no more true to their real nature than the
 
 was true, who filings his thousands about as if his bankers balance was splen- did joke Gas it is). We rise i'll life, and move from the farm to the city, ex- change the kitchen for the drawing room, linsey woolsey for silks and blue
 jean for broadcloth. Theyoung gentle man comes in his Sunday best and takes the young lady to the concert or the opera walks home with her from church and stays to tea, admires her on the piano and her opinion of the latest new poem or story, and she admires his fine manners, his speaking eyes and the way he parts his hair in the middle, his lamblike temper-the curly, innocent lamb. God forgive them. It i5 game of cards, in which it is of the first im- portanca to both not to reveal their hands--but the revelation comes when it IS too late, that 1t was all sad mistake. Now, of all things needed to make a true marriage, it seems to me that hon. esty and reality and certain sweet aud simple intimacy stand among the first. Young women make nets instead of cages, Dean Swift said, and he ought to
 have said young men also. It IS all we'll enough that we should appear at our
 best in those days, just as in the spring a lovelier iris changes the furnished dome but this mask we wear is not ou1
 best. Our best is the good, honest
 average. I hold steadily and steadily say that the good matches are those in
 which we have been honest and sincere.
 wEDLoCK AND DEADLOCK,
 Great trouble comes aga1n out of the
 mistake which has always been made
 and, suppose, which always will be-
 that the attraction which ends ill wed
 lock may be an outer rather than an in
 ner fitness 50 that an attractive fact
 and form, though there be no answering
 soul, shall count for more than the fin , est eraces of mind and soul. So one 5 it may be, mGrries a doll and the othe } a dolt, to find in no long time that the, 5 have made Q mistake 8 lifetime canno 5 unmake, and that wedlock rhymes yer 9 sadly with deadlock. So you shall talk l this for an axiom, true as the stnrs - that there is no intimate and ultimat I fitness in fancy man and woman t e make them husband and wife, except n certain fitness of mind, heart and chal $ acter or the loving longing out of whic l. this may come. Beauty will always | d a primal attraction, and it always shoul d be, for God has made beauty to be 'e blessing. Yes, and somewhere in tn Il world for the beauty that is merely it form and feature there are those wh IS will rejoice with great joy and nevt 'r repent, and great beauty may go wit It great worth. But in this most serio1 ot step two human beings can take, a o. these questions are swept aside. ar as wait for that of intimate fitness to | i'd settled first. Are your counterpart w not of dark to blonde, and the und g line to the over line in stature, but Id thought and feeling, of habit and te ds dency of life and soul? Because we ct Id no moro alter these things as @ ru he than we can change animals. Nor ne 1T. the man be the better or the great be half. know of very happy marriaa ry in which the hus sband and wife are bo he pubic speakers, and the wife told I e, once how she had been to speak in Ike town where they gave her a fine fee a so asked her to come again, and we 'se after her husband went to the sal ai- place, and they gave him half as mu re and did not ask him to come agaln, 8 n I>a cna,,,o oI 4o ,Go,.rr o. ,~,,-