davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Bank Officers Elected.

Ia the counting room Of the Sedalis
Savings Bank, yesterday afternoon, the fol-
lowing officers we're elected for the ensuing
yesr:
Mentor Thompson, president.
T. w. Cloney, cashier.
r T. Gentry, aes;stant cashier.
T. Z. King, book-keeper.
A semi-snnusl dividsn of per cent.
was then declared, after which the meeting
sdjournei.
The Ssdalia Savings In one Of the solid
institutions Of the city, and the BAzoo il
pleased 20 know that iia business il con
stantly increasing. The officers OF the
bsHk are among our most worthy citis.ns,
sud the courteous treatment they extend 70
all Who have dealings With them is sure
guarantee that the Sedalis saving will al
9.ys be popular With those Who have
xnk,ng business TO transact.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Fire IL the Band Room.

There was 10 Ere in the armory of the
Queen City Guards Friday evening, "a er-
roneously stated in two OF the city pspers
There was. however. a light blaze in the
q. c. G.'s band room that caue near "a ak
ing large couhagration.
An attorney froia Warsaw, loaded to the
muzzie with cheap whisky, wss attracted
ny the music and staggered mp into The
room, where be managed TO knock lamp
from a table 10 the floor. II br Ike, tie
oil iyniied and the fame shot upward and
created the greatest confusion.
The boys managed to ex,ingui-h it be-
fore any damage had been done, and in
the meantime the drunken attorney made
himself scarce. He was afterwards cor
rallied in the Senate saloon, and was re-
quested to pay for the lamp broken, but on
pleading the poverty act, was allowed TO
depart and sdvise5 not 10 visit them again
until an invitation was extended.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

A certain undertaken Of this city Wa
the angricst man in the state Friday
night. He had retired, and was COM
fort.bly tucked beneath the bed clothing.
when he Was aroused BY hearing . iord
hammerins on his front door. Mutterine
anything but words Of welcome, he aro-e
and in an angry tone Of voice asked !:
"Who II there?" Instead Of answering
the question, the visitors propounded an
other. desiring to know il they we're at the
residence Of the undertaken. An af6rma-
tive answer Vas given. when the two vags,
vell-known business men, and particular
friends Of the coffin dealer, belched forth !:
"Give us two thic) biers." The visitors
made good time getting down the street,
While the man OF the house again hunted
his couch, but swearing vengeance on the
disturben Of his slumbers.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
BRANCH.
KANSAS Il TEXAS DIVISION.
Frantic Qreye.

A the Missouri Pacific train lei, the
Garrison house cepo: last night, moving
wet, two frantic "grsys," who had jus'
-tep;ed in somewhere TO get "ano;her mai,
in their coffius" white the train vas stand-
ing still, came rushing upon che scene with
hats in one hand and oveVcoats and sateh-
els in the other, trying to catch the train.
Their eyes were ~ big al ssucers, and their
HAIR standing on end like quilts upon the
fre;ted porcupine. A they skinned out
after the train, which was nearly city yards
ahead Of them, the crowd yelled encour
seement in this s;yle: All vi. whoop la!
vhoop EN- NJ, Mosc-; hold ON to your
hair, p,isier; don't GO Cd mad, old man;
come and have drink, won't you? are ye
going all the way tonight, stranger? 90
in, boys, II, bet against the engine" The
fellows ran and halloed and yelped, until
each Of them got hold on the rear end OF
the car and we're hauled on BY the porters,
head over heels.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Some One Always Wins.

A correspondent invites attention to the
fact that il has been every where rein srked
by the readers of the leading Journals in all
parts of the country that the drawings OF
the Louisiana State Lottery Company.
which occur without ever any interruption
in their regularity On the second Tuesday
of each month at New Orleans, La. and
any assertion made over the name Of NJ. A.
Dauphin, New Orleans, La, or same per
son at No. Sl9 broadway, New York City,
are invariably justified by the subsequent
action of the company, 60 tina, $50, 900 for
50 seems TO be certain happiness in store
for some happy mortal somewhere.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
The Grand Lodge OF Odd Fellows.

The Grand Lodge Of Missouri, i. U. q.
F., will meet in S:. Lou.s on Jan. llih
AID 18th, for the purpose Of transacting
some important business. Two delegates
will 20 from the lodges Of this city to take
part in the proceedinas. r. L, Lsmp.on,
Sedslia Lodge No. S5s. will be one Of the
delegate. and E. J. E,gie,on, .lso q prom
inent member Of the order. will represent
Nespolis Lodge No. l63. Both gentlemen
will leave Tomorrow evening and antici-
pate important results from the meeting.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Was He Glorious P

Yesterday morning early, e. BAzoo re-
porter vss pacing pensively down Ohio
street, meditating upon the literary want.
of the readers of the paper which "is pub
lisbed for the people nov upon EARTH" and
not for the sancti6ed ssints who are twang-
ing golden hsrps on top of the clouds,
which 6oat in the blue empyresn, he fell
over . Lord Stanley cravsi. in front Of
Sichers' hotel. The cravat was laying in
the middle of the street on the fat of its
back, and in the center of it glittered a
rich, rare and costly jewel. How in thun-
der that style Of cravat can &c; disengaged
from . fellows mech, without great personal
violence, The BAzoo can not understand.
The original owner was either robbed or
else he We 20 'svfully glorious" that he
tore il Of himself and cast II on the ground.
The crsvst and the rare jewel are nov on
exhibition in the BAzoo's museum of rare
curiosities, and the owner can have both
By calsfng, proving his property, and pay.
ing fifteen cents line for this notice.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

Charlie Jackson, aesd fifteen years, sor
Of w. p. accompanied BY another lad
still younger. who left home three or fouI
day ago for . trip around the world. has
been heard of 1t MOberly.
Jackson says his boy ran away from
home because . thrashing had been admin.
Uttered. He concluded that he would ne.
turn when he became hungry. an 30 con-
cluded to let him take his time to il.
The boys will probably come sneaking in
tonight or tomorrow.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Died.

Yesterday forenoon, at 10 o'clock, Mr..
Green, wife Of John d. Green, died Of con.
sumption At the family residence on the
corner Of Fifteenth and Kentucky street.
The funeral hss not been arranged last
night, owing to the absence Of relatives
from q distance
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
The Friend of Delicate Ladies'.

Wasner's Safe Kidney and Liver Cure 10
the remedy that will cure the many dis
eases peculiar 10 women. Headaches. neu.
ralgia, disordered nerves. weakness. mental
shocks, and kindred ailments are e6ecsually
removed By its use.-The Mothers Mega
sine.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

1t is rumored that the sale O. DR..
Bull's Cough Syrup hes taken such dimen-
sions thst the proprietors are unable to
supply all orders. We advise our drug
gists to prepare themselves for sll emer.
eeocies - the people rely on them ior the
valuable remedy.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
Married.

In this CITY, yesterday forenoon, at the
residence Of Mr.. Hiiderbrandt, by Rev. ].
H. Asling, Of the German Methodist
church, Mr.. Hoel Emerich and Miss Mary
Wegman.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

Lands wanted. All persous having
good improved, timber, or prairie lands
in Pestis county Tor sale cheap for cash
should Sc or address me- at once. F.
Houston, Sedslia, No. l-9s&vAt
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
BOHEMIAN C0HsPRAr0R

Racy Incidents in the Life Of
Stanley Huntley, Ono OF the
Newspaper Men Charged With
Getting UP the Famous Morey
Letter-A Novel Prise Fight
How Euntley Used to Set 'Em
Up for Rural Roosters.-His Per
sonal Appearance - How He
Dressed.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

-Oser $4,000 Howe Scales sold Bo q.
den. Se!leck 4 Co.. Agents., s.. Louis, No
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11
DE- I N E i!

Scarlet medicated Under.
wear for Ladies and gents
$500 per suit.
Fine Glastonbury all wool
suits for gents, $500.
Elegant wool.unGerwear for
ladies s145 per suit.
Warm merino goods for
ladies, & 25per suit.
Mer;no suits for gents, sec.
Warm underwear for boys
and misses 20. so, 80 & 99c
s1.2O, $1.50 per suit.
Largest line Of Hosiery and
Gloves in Scdalia.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

To Printers.
lam prepared to cast composition rollers
promptly ior printers in or out Of the city.
Terms ~ cheap - ANYBODY Suitable
boxes furnished for the transportation OF
rollers at net cost. Address
J. WDr GOODWIN.
The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1881-01-11

IS If it had been baby's; she hent
over his head her indomitsble one.
fearless, tender, powerful. And after
a time. with a slight movemer: she
brought his eyes and hers to the small
window, and pointed to him the
heavens, from which all clouds were
drifting, where the serene rested deep
blue between the glittering stars, and
stretched backwards from the bright
white moon.
He lifted his small eyes to her face
with curious expression, like the ap-
peal Of the dumb brute that begs for
translation of the feeling that it cannot
give tongue to. There was no shade
Of sentimentality in Mrs. Ferns spoken
answer to this mute speech.
"Why will you not look there in
stead of here?"
He turned back to the coffin and
hid his face from the suggestions of
the far away heavens. His words
were thick and his hoarse voice quiv-
cred.
because this is her. The bit Of
flesh held is.her; the lips l kissed
are here; the cheek ! loved is here.
1t Is only the thing you say, not the
spirit. The spirit may be yonder, as
cold and uncanny as those blessed
@tars. But twas the dear body that I
llursed and loved. The bright eyes,
her blue eyes-l nailed them safe IN
here"
He nodded his head at me and went
on with q proud mournfulness / should
not have expected of him:
"You called me u hard word, sir
a word that might tempt a man to be
the vile brute he named. Your scent
is mighty keen, sir, but it shifted
astray at the last. The demon that
killed my child was Group, and / |
kissed down her eyelids. You may 20 |
in the church yard and see her name |
written On . grave-stone, and you
might have seen. three years agone,
\ funeral there. They put coffin in
The ground. didn't they, wife , but it
ion't bold my darling"
He stood up straight now, and
heed me With . tremor, with eager
,es. Grief and passion gave him elo-
3ueDce, and his defence Was warm.
''Do you think l would give my
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16


The following from one of our ex-
changes, so clearly expresses our
views upon the subject, that we cop
py it without comment:
You have an undoubted right to
stop newspaper whenever you are
so disposed, upon payment of all ar
rearages. Do not hesitate to do so
on account of any tenderness OF
feelings" Of any editor. Don't sup
pose he would stop buying sugar of
you, or meat, clothing dry goods,
&c., if he thought he was not get
ting his moneys worth? and why
should you not exercise the same
privilege with regard to him and his
wares, when you get tired of them =?
And when YOU discontinue paper
do it manfully, Don't ba so pitiful
as to throw it back to the postmas-
ter with a oontemptuous II don't
want it any longer!" and have "re-
fused" written upon the margin, and
have the paper returned to the edi-
tor. No gentleman ever stopped a
paper that way, no matter If his
head is covered with grey hairs that
should be honorable. If you do
not longer wish to receive a news
paper, write note to the editor
like man saying so-and be sure
that arrearages are paid. This is the
way to stop a newspaper.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16
A Chunk of Natural History.

A boy about fourteen years of age
was smoking cigar on the south
portic5 Of the City Hall the other
morni 'g when a citizen halted before
him ard said:
''Bo do you realize what you
are doing"
"Smokin' wonderful good FIVE
center, won on a bet" was the re-
ply;
''But 4 mt you know that you
are .illins your system with deadly
poison??'
"Naw.'
swell, you are. That cigar con-
tains enough nicotine to kill a cat
I'm no cat. y
IL know. 1t does not kill you
suddenly, but polsons the blood and
sows the seed of fell disease. You
may drop dead on your way home,
my boy
II amt goin' home"
at fills me with horror to see a
lad of your age destroying both soul
and body. Boy, | entreat you to
throw away that vile cigar"
II dasn't. Some one else would
pick it up and be pizened.'
Throw it away and I'll buy you
three apples"
Don't like 'em."
''Or quart of peanuts"
Say" said the boy as he fondly
regarded the inch of ashes at the end
of the cigar. Il bet boy the cigars
this morning that he couldn't tech
his tongue to lamp-post and then
sing "Sally Walter?" He teched,
and there's crowd up there now
tryin' to thaw him loose. / amt
very scarf about bein' pizened, and
| don't keer much for fatherly ad-
vice, but if you've got any spare
time you might go up there and tell
that .erA boy that chunk of natur-
al philosophy is worth hull barn
ful uf experiments.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16
4 Narrow Escape.

Two Spanish beauties in Paris,
the Countess Mnltedo and Senorita
Penedo, had a narrow escape of be-
ing suffocated by natural flowers in
their hair and the trimming of their
ball dresses as they were returning
home from Queen Isabella's soiree
in a closely shut up carriage. The
flowers were profusely employed in
garlands. The ladies for some time
chatted gaily. One and then the
other became silent. Count Multe-
do, who was with them, grew alarm
ed when neither Of them replied to
observations he made and questions
he put. and all tho more so that he
felt oppressed by the perfume of
the flowers. When he caused the
carrige to stop and opened the win
dow he found them insensible, but
they soon recovered when taken in
to the air; they, however, caught a
severe cold from the sudden expos
ure
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16
A Western Editors Apology.

This is our first experience in run.
ming e newspaper. Little did we
think when We placed our name in
the Clarion as the responsible per
son for the matter that happened to
find lis way into these columns that
anything would ever happen that
we would have to take back or have
a head put on rs. The item which
appeared about one Professor Ger
bert playing the "Arkansaw Tray
cler" around the street corners Of
Kearney for cold biscuits and slack
and sour barley water has got 20 be
apologized for Last Wednesday.
when we were going along one Of
the principal streets of the county
seat, in company with several
friends, there suddenly appeared be-
fore our gaze the slandered Professor.
He commenced his conversation by
saving that he had not been given
his dinner by a servant girl at the
back door, and thought he would
make a lunch Of the writer. We
entered a protest, bat to no use. He
claimed he was four hundred miles
from home, both heels run over, and
all wool and yard wide, warranted
to neither rip nor ravel, and had
killed enough editors to make Il cor
durov road from Lookout Mountain
to Puget sound. Heunbuttoned his
coat, and gently placing his hand on
his hip pocket, he calmly gave us
oar choice between Il retraction and
having our carcass shot full of bal
let holes. As the thoughts rapidly
traversed our mind about having
our remains sent to an aged and
loving mother, looking Ike the top
seive of n tanning mill, and how our
creditors would mourn at our death;
as we thought of another person who
holds warranty deed for four sec
tons of our heart, town 6, range Is,
and the idea of being shot by by a
second-class, one horse, crank fid-
dler, was more than we could stand.
Hence the apology.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16
An Anecdote of Prentice.

When George ID. Prentice was ed
itor Of the New England Reeiew he
made some reflection On the man
agement of a Sound beat, then COM
manded by John Vanderbilt, a
brother of the Commodore A wri-
ter in the Hartford Courant says that
Vanderbilt was SO offended that he
called upon Hrsntioe to give him a
thrashing. Prentice's Office was IL
the third story of the building, di=
rectly atthe head of the second flight
of stairs. Vanderbilt made his bus-
mess known, and in less time than
it takes to tell it, found himself ly-
ing on the side walk in front of the
door. He soon got W and went to
his boat, swearing tengenee. In
his next issue Prentice gave an ae-
count of the affair and invited Capt.
Vanderbilt to call again when he
saw fit, at the same time telling
Vanderbilt that he (Prentice) weigh-
ed fourteen stone, used both hands
with equal dexterity, and swung
pair of fists like the halyard filoeks
of an East India schooner. Wander
bilt did not renew the quarrel.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16
-
Is the Devil a Hog.

Mamma" said ayoungster, is the
bad man a hog"
"What do you mean, my son p
81 mean Satan. is he a hog?"
"Well, no, /; he is generally spoken
of as a serpent, by christians, but he
is properly supposed to be without
definite form, that is capable of as
suming any shape that may suit
his purpose. But why do you
ask ?"
Because when ! was down
town yesterday, pap got right red in
the face and told another man, if
he didn't lick Tom Trotter the dew
lis a hog"
''And didn't he do it?" inquired
the anxious parent.
4ko'p, he didn't, but he tried like
blazes, and when they Yiped blood
off his face he gimme q new ball te
tell you he'd fell out of a buggy and
hurt himself"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16

Recently, while visiting friend
in the odd Dominion, / very much
admired his long ranks of stove
wood, carefully piled and neatly
kept.
Yes" sail he, "that is the best
investment on the farm"
Cut, hauled and worked up dur
ing January, one does not feel the
expense. And it saves much valua-
bic time, and temper as well, at 9th
er seasons of the year, when there
is need of every effort to be put forth
in planting, tending, or harvesting
crops. Stove wood, in order to be
good. should be well seasoned.
Hence little more than a years
supply should be kept on hand.
But it can be worked more econom-
ically when green. Now, if the
reader wished to be up to his busi-
ness, and accounted athrifty farmer,
let him go to work at once and man
ufaoture enough of this very neces-
sary commodity to last year and a
bali. Then. when you have once
started in the good way, go forward,
persevere, and there will be one in
your household that will rise up and
call you blessed. Is you have not a
wood shed attached to your house,
cord it in snug racks, and it will an
swer Just as well, and perhaps bet
ter, for green wood, in order to sea-
son thoroughly, needs air and sun
light. Another view to take of the
good wood pile is that il is an anti
dyspeptio. If you take hand in
preparing it, it leads TO a good appe-
tite, and a good appetite is usually
healthful. Secondly, good wood, in
most eases, means good cooking
nice light bread, etc. Andif one al
ways has a healthful appetite and
well-cooked victuals, he will not be
very apt 10 have the dyspepsia or
other chronic ailments. And, more
over. ~ christian farmers we should
not lose sight OF a good wood pile as
a means of grace. How can we ex-
peet the angel who presides over the
household to retain all of her angelic
virtues if we provide her with only
wet, ''snggY" wood,
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16

Right Watering Of Plants.

'If you were very thirsty" said
old Mr.. Ewing. 'and | was to pour
a glass of water on top of your head,
would you be very grateful TO me?"
"No,' said Tom, who was watering
his geranium; I'd be madw
SWELL" said the old man, "you
are not treating your plant much
better. 1t has mouths, and it likes
to drink when it is thirsty, but you
don't pour this water into its
mouths"
81 don't know where they are, "
said Tom, looking curiously at the
bush.
"Its leaves are full of eager little
pores and they are 'choked with
dust" Mr.. Ewing said: Just put
the nose again on the watering pot
and wash off the leaves"
Tom picked up the nose, put it on
the spout of the pot, and gave the
bush thorough wetting.
1T looks better" he said. "Has
it any other mouths2"
Plenty more" said the old man
one at the end of each rootlet. When
you pour stream of water around
the stem of the plant, | think ii
must feel as you would if put your
drink on your head"
"Yes," said Tom, ''see that fuschia.
l didn't water the leaves nor the
ends of the roots, | am sure"
"And don't you see you are doing
the same thing by that rhododen-
dron?" said the irritable old man
when yop do anything, boy, do il
in the right wayi'
| And he took the watering pot him
self, and every mouth in each plant
gol a good drink that time.-Farm-
er's Home Journal.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16

ed to make the best of it. The cider,
on being informed of the elopement,
seemed to be more affected that
they should have gone to Elder
Wright TO be married, than by any.
pangs of unrequitted love.
They might, at least, have given
rue the privilege of marrying them,
though faint likely Seth could at
ford to pay much of fee," said he
regretfully.
A day or two later he informed
Mrs. Savage that it had been reveal
ed to him that there was a provi-
dencc in Phebe's refusal to marry
him, and Heaven had ordained that
he should marry her, instead. And
Mrs. Sauagc accepted the ordination
OF Heaven.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1881-03-16
Where the shock csmc In.

"Did you know Bill York, who
used to keep a saloon here in Gal
weston ?"
"Yes, was acquainted witha a fel-
low of that name"
"Well, he is needless sort of a
fellow. lie teiegraphs to his aged
mother from OMAHA.
The latest news up here is that
! am going to hang tomorrow"
'ies, that wSs very Needless. He
might have telegraped that he was
thre. tened with throat troubles, or
something Of the kind. The shock
would no. have been so severe TO
his aged mother
"0h, that's net where the shock
comes in
HWhere does it come inw
'Why the careless fellow forgot to
pay for the telegram"