Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1881-08-25
Dressed to Death.

thOuSnClul man VINO was rough
ing it, in the mountains, whose attire
there consisted only of flannel shirt,
a pair of pantaloOns, hat, and shoes
and stocking, who, on arising in the
morning, was Sup and dressed" within
three minutes, thus reflected regarding
the shackles of male dress imposed upon
him in the city by custom and fashion:
Z" How many bandages am required to
put on every morning? 1 will COM
mence at the feet. Tight shoes, stock
ings, trousers, drawers, undershirt, shirt,
vest, coat, collar and necktie. Shirt
bosom and collar starched as stiff as q
board, and about as comfortable. How
many bandages in all? Ten. Do they
add to my comfort, especially in warm
weather? Assuredly, they do not. My
first move on a warm morning on get
ting to the office is to remove my coat,
and sometimes my collar and necktie.
Why should wear at all garments
which are SO uncomfortable? Again.
Do these ten bandages in which custom
says must daily envelop myself conduce
to my health and strength 1 think
not. Because, dressing as l do now in
loose trousers, loose shirt, with
neck and throat uncollared, l
do certainly experience a vigor and
freedom of motion unknown in my city
garb. Precipitation passes off quickly
and does not oblige me to wear all day
sodden, wet piece of linen in the shape
of a shirt. l think my skin has better
chance to act, and as l am told there
are thousands on thousands of minute
lungs in the skin which both absorb live
elements and throw off dead matter, it
strikes me that the garb prescribed by
custom is not at all calculated to assist
nature in the machinery of the cuticle.
Regarding my feet, l find them far
more comfortable in a pair of canvas
slippers, and if you please without stock
ings, than in my city CATERS. l can
now easily wash them as many times q
day as do my hands, and l find they
need washing as many times. 1t strikes
me that these feet of mine have all their
lives, or rather during all my life, been
too much swaddled and cramped. Look
at them now! They are sore and out of
shape with corns and bunions. What
has done thisp Shoe shackles, leather
fashion and the shoemaker. What life
long barbarous treatment of two such
useful members of society! believe now
that our modern swathed up, bandaged,
is is fruitful cause of bodily weak
ness, and of diseases dire coming
through such weakness, which diseases
doctors dignity and render the origin
more obscure by giving them learned
and Latin names. L do not, through
one or another bodily discomforts, heed
| the demands of nature. When l am
overheated, feverish and out of sorts
generally, it is in many cases call from
the body that l take off the bandages
and wear less of them. Do l obey? No
Usually take glass of beer; and then
another. So the needless wear, teal
and abuse of my fearful and wonderful
anatomy goes on from day to day, from
week to- week, from summer to summer
And at last the wear and tear and weak
ness attacks some particular organ
maybe the head, the bladder, the kid
neys, the lungs, the stomach, and the
doctor comes after the damage is ire
parable and tries to bolster me up, sad
died as am with my WORKOUT interna
machinery by his advice and his drugs
And at last l am dead, and an autopsy
is held on me and he finds the part tina
gave way and writes about it, partly II
English, partly in Latin, and feels wisel
than ever. But died partly of ignoran
dressing, partly of ignorant eating
partly Of persistent breathing of bat
house made air, partly of other simple
evils not as yet recognized as belligeren
powers laying constant siege to ou
health citadels.'
Such were the thinkings of the man il
the flannel shirt and trousers.-N. Y
Graphic.