The Osceola times., 1881-08-06
HAZlNG SCHuRZ.
His Esteemed Contemporaries Cbafnna
Hlm-what is Alleged TO have Occurred.
New York star.


editorial rooms for the reception of theil
new and illustrious chief, Carl Schurz
The walls of the inner sanctun were
adorned with new paintings by old
masters, and an upright seven-and. three
quarter octave piano was placed in {
corner Immediately before the desk
which was to be occupied by the new.
conner.
When Mr.. Schurz entered the office
yesterday morning at 826 O'Clock the
top OF his polished desk was covered
with bric-a-brac and handsome vase
of flowers stood by his inkstand. Seat.
ing himself on the revolving stool that
had been prepared for his accommoda
tien, the editor eazed about him with an
expression OF the supremest satisfaction
In his ocular ramble round the room
he caught sight of the piano, and in
stantly turned in his seat and faced the
instrument. Some thoughtful attache
had placed an open copy of "Vere vas
dat Sherman's Faderand" on the piano
rest, and as Mr.. Schurz ran his eve up
and down the familiar passages of the
score, his countenance beamed with the
most perfect delight, and, pulling back
his coat-sleeves, he was soon executing
the famous melody with all the intense
vigor OF gentleman who appreciates an
allegro yivace movement and knows
how to represent it on the keyboard OF
a tirst-class piano.
Mr.. Schurz was plump" in the middle
of his most effective fortissimo, and the
atmosphere was literally crowded with
sharps, double sharps, whole tones, semi
tones, and double y flats, when the fore.
man whistled through the pipe for early
COPY. The whistle was shrill, and
grated SO harshly on the ear of the ac-
complished editorial musician that he
naturally stopped playing, and looked
under the piano TO see whether he had
trod on anything. Discovering nothing
out of the way, he proceeded with the
piece, and had just reached that part OF
it where no doubt is permitted to remain
that the Sherman's faderland is all over
Germany, when the exasperated fore
man sent another foghorn note down
The pipe, and followed with a succession
OF such piercing screams that Mr.. Schur2
sprang from his chair and retreated u
the front office.
"Who put that wildcat in the piano?'
he asked, rather savagely for a new.
conner.
The trembling staff fastened to in.
quire the cause of their leaders annoy
ance, and reached the piano Just in time
to catch still more terrific blast from
the composing-room IN.
Mr.. Schurz smiled when the noises
were explained to him, and, apologizing
for having caused the delay, hastened to
his desk and proceeded to evolve.
They'll expect sumner from me to-
day." he sollloquized, as he ran his
hands through his flowing hair and
stared into the purple depths of the ink.
stand.
Hap he calculated, seizing his pen
spasmodically, II have it!'
In precisely thirty seconds from the
moment his pen had touched the paper,
Mr.. Schurz paused and reread what he
had written:
"When the day star of freedom shall
arise from the hills of Maine ana wend
its way in triumph to the mountains OF
Michigan"
"Sayl" called Mr.. Schurz to the people
in the outside Office, 'aie there any
mountains In Michiga1W
The staff looked at one another, and
then at the big map that hung from the
wall, but returned no answer.
go away" said Mr.. Schurz impa-
tiently.
And then he erased the word Michi-
gan and substituted California. The
CLEAN of satisfaction which followed his
escape from this dilemma was succeeded
by trown backer than the "inky waves
of midnight" whatever they are, when
Mr.. Schurz's gigantic intellect refused to
inform him what "the day star of frees
DOM" having wended her way to the
m ountains of California, did when she
got there. After vainly gazing around
the room and under tables and chairs
for suggestions on the subject, he seemed
seized with an idea, and turning to the
piano struck up that most inspiring OF
all mclouies, "What Are the Wild Waves
saying
JD., what the "wild waves" were say
ing Mr.. Schurz didn't discover as soon
us he did what the wild foreman was
saying The latter had lost all control
Of himself, and, taking is end of the
speaking-tube between his teeth, he
yelled some things into the ear of Mr..
Schurz that caused that gentleman to
spring into the air with sort of grape
vine twist, and take refuge behind q
plaster of paris tatuette of William Cul-
len Bryant that stood in corner.
"Schlupenhuhlew was all that Mr..
Schurz could find breath to say.
Anybody who has been in Germany
lately must know that this is word
which is only justified by the most ex-
asperating circumstances.
When the foreman had blazed away
until his palate was almost blown off,
the "devil" came bounding into the
terrified editors room and wanted 10
know whether they were "a goin' TO Git
any copy from hin before midnight?
Stimulated by this imperative inquiry,
Mr.. Schurz again scIzph his pen and
began rolling his eyes about wildly IN
search of an idea. BY way of hurrying
matters along, he tore up what he had
already written and started IN afresh.
The ink flew over the paper spleDdidly,
and before he was aware of it he hau
actually written, Times have changed
and so have the men. 1t might be un-
gallant to say that tie ladies have
changed with them, and as we are happy
10 be able to enumerate among our few
remaining subscribers several ladies
who were with us when our journal, to
which We have so recently become at
tached, first saw the light of day, we
will not 90 further than to say that how.
ever venerable they may be, they (the
ladies' still command our undivided adj
miration and respect. We cannot for
get, and we have certainly ne desire to,
that our mothers were ladies, and that
our sisters, wives, and sweethearts, II we
have any, are of the same sex. 1t Is
with pleasure. therefore. that we greet