The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1881-02-11


of wheat in 1880.
A DELEGATION of New Workers are
trying to defeat all the recent nomina.
tions for that State
CoNKLlSG says he saved Garfield
and ID if he doesn't name the Secro-
tFry of the Treasury !"
GRANT will go TO Mexico next month
in the interest Of tho railroad company
of which he is the President.
"McGEoEGE," is how tho San Fran
cisco Examiner stupidity prints the name
Of oregon's new Congressman.
MITCHELL il woman sufirnger, and
yet Mrs. Duniway doesn't like to jump
her own brother in bis defense.
TnE average Albany Had swears by
the Great lIorn-Spoon that he believes
Mitchell and Scott arc both right.
ALFoNso's baby is, Of course, a more
than common infant, 30 they call it an
infanta, in the comparative degree.
TnE new census makes about ffty-
one millions Of people, men, women
and children, in the United States.
OSE good turn deserves another.
Scott says Mitchell kicked him out,
knd now be proposes to keep Mitchell
out.
GREAT BniTAiN, in taking additional
and decisive steps to withdraw from
Afghanistan, acts upon good resolu-
ton FOR the new year.
AN umbrella and dime novel are
both too bnnglesome TO tho Albany col.
lege girl just ROW, and she wishes the
rainy season was "oyah p
MAJOR GIRD says Mitchell and Scott
"a ight as well drop their game oil
bluff" for they are both giving thoir
hands away" to tho Democrats
ST. LoUis is TO have a $4,000 Gro
nation furnace. We would suggest
that il be used exclusively for baking
dead duck" both Scott and Mitchell
The Standard has an editorial head
ed, "More Money Wanted We en-
dorse the proposition and hope our de
linqucnt Subscribers will take the hint
IL the aurieular appendages of Wes
yer are as large as Mast portrayE them
1t IS supposed that Sparks would hav,
had his hands fall If BIO had got him by
the ears.
SECRETARY ScHuEz says "it il tan
range dot dose soljer fellers can't catcl
Sitting Bull ofer he never gets of
( seat" Go out and lasso him your
self, Carl
ScoTr says Mitchell jerks more
poetry in composition than he does, bu
he can't cut a patchin' to him when i
comes to real stoga d-n to express
the situation
SCoTT commenced his reforms for th,
New Year by swearing off" the sup
pert Of "cbarlatans." Mitchell com
menced hi. by kicking 'ingrates." Boil
are laudabie reforms.
The Senate committee on foreign ro
lations reported back the Chinese trea
ties with recommendation that the,
pass without amendment. They will
be called up at an early day.
TnE niggers of Indiana are cxodust
ing back to "Georgy,' and tho nigger
of Kansas are nearly starving. Yer
see the RAIDS won't have any uso 70
them for the next four years.
The New Orleans Pica,ntne thu
slanderously observes "The manu-
facture of syrup from watermolons is ,
new industry started in Oregon. Moth
ingis lackingnow but the watermelons.
| THE Senate has passed the bill plac
ing Fitz John Porter on the retired Lis
with the rank of Colonel. The bill hal
two moro ordeals to pass before it be
comes law-the House of Represent
atives and the White House.
A PRIEST and twenty members O
the land league have been summoned
to answer charges of intimidation al
Mallow, ireland. Shehan, secretary O
the Parnell defense fund, has been com
mitted for trial on charge of intimi
dation.
Poor GRANTS income is only 81, 900
a year, together with tho proceeds O
the two stations presented to him il
Asia. He should be more literally
provided for, or he will have to groom
his own horses. We suggest to JOhr
Crawford to offer him the Presidency
of the Santiam "Canawl" at liberia
!salary.