Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1881-08-23
lancaster fntelligemrer.
TUESDAY EVENING, AUGUST 2s. 1881
A YOUTH from Chicago.


"Perhaps," says Bill Nye, emo surging
sentiments of pity have stirred my very
soul during nv official career like those
that throbbed wildly athwart my system
a few days ago. 1t was case of the most
bitter disappointment of a young life. A
youth from Chicago came to me near the
Close of the day. was just about to lock
nm the judicial scales for the evening and
secure the doors of the archives prepara-
tory to going out and shaking the mayor
for the lemonade. after which l intended
to breathe in a little fresh atmosphere and
20 home for dinner.
alt had been hard day in the temple of
Justice that day, and the court was weary.
1t had dealt out even-handed justice at
regular rates since early morning at SO
much per deal, till fatigue was beginning
to show itself in the lines upon that broad
white brow. Therefore, when a halting
step was heard on the stair, there was a
low murmur on the part of the court, and
a ha!f-surprised moan that sounded like
tho tail end of an affidavit.
"The young man Who entered tho hal
lowed presence of eternal justice and the
all-pervading and dazzling beauty of the
court in it's shirt sleeves, was of about
medium stature, with shoes cut decolette,
and Roman striped socks clocked with
brocaded straw -colored silk.
'.He wore an ecru-colOrcd straw hat,
with navy blue brOcaded band and neck
tic of old gold, with polka dots of hum
berta and cardinal, interspcrsed with
embroidered horseshoe and stirrup in
coucherde soleil and ultramarine. His
hair was dark and oleaginous, and his
shirt was crtam-colored ground, with
narrow baby-blue stripes. cut-away col
lar and cuffs that extended out into
space.
" He also had some other clothes Oh.
But all over, and pervading the entire
man, was the look of hOpelessness and
corroding grief. With ali his good clothes
on he was hollow mOckery, for the eyes
were heavy with woe.
"The nose also was heavy with woe.
"This feature, in fact, was more ap-
propriately draped in token of its sadness
than any of the rest. Few noses are so
expressive Of general and incurable
gloom as this ono was. 1t had evidently
at one time been a glad, joyous and
buOyant nose, but now it was despondent
and low-spirited.
"There was look of gOneness and utter
dcsolatiOn about it that would stir the
better impulses of the most heartless.
"TLe feature had evidently tried to Gen.
tralizc itself, but had failed. Here and
there narrow strips of court plaster had
gone out after it and tried to win it back,
but they had not succeeded
81 said, Mister, there seems to be a
panic among the component parts of your
nose. It's none Of my business, Of course,
but couldn't you get 4 brass band and call
it together? Then you corid hold a meet
ing and decide whether it had better re-
sumo or not
"TEc gentleman from Chicago went
through the motions Of wiping the wide
waste and bowling desolatiOn where his
ncc,joyaus nose had been. and then, put
ting away the plum -colorcd silk handker-
chief with the orange border, he said:
"'Squirc, have been grossly deceived.
You See in me the victim Of a base mis-
representation. In Chicago this season OF
the year is extremely unh ealthy. The in
tense hot weather carried away the iEno
cent and the good, and I feared my turn
would come soon. | heard Of the salu
briOus cline Of your mountain city, where
the days are filled with gladness and the
burning heat of the mighty city by the i'll
land sea never comes. / came here two
brief days ago, and You can see with the
naked eye what the result has been. II
is not gratifying. The climate may in tho
abstract be all right, but there are certain
sudden and wonderful atmospheric changes
that cannot account for, and they arc
very disastrous.
81 was sitting il Second street sa-
loon to-day, talking about matters and
things, whcn the conversation turned upon
physical strength. One thing led to an.
other. and finally made little humorous
remark to 4 young man there, which re
mark made in Chicago many times with,
out disastrous results, but the air clouded
up all OF a sudden, and in the darkness
could see Roman candles going off. and pin
wheels, and high priced rockets, and blue
lights, etc.
"'Shortly after that gathered up what
fragments of my face l could find, and
went down to the doctors Office. lie
held an inquest Oh my nose, and l paid
him for it. l shall so back to Chicago to-
morrow. | shall not be as handsome rs
wss, but have gained a good deal of in
formation about the broad and beautiful
West which is priceless in value to me-.
''' All l wished to say was this {: Ii you
see fit TO mention this matter to the pub
lie, tone it down as much as possible, and
say that for 4 bilious nervous tempera
ment perhaps the air here is too bracing.
81 have considered his sensitive feel.
ings, and have tried TO give the above &C
count in fair and impartial tones."