The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1881-04-02


gesticulates so much with the topmost part
of the body. Ingersoll, with stiff neck,
might he worth only 500 a night. Now
he refuses offers at 5000. He tips his fore
head this or that way, aud has a most ef-
lective nod. Speaking in short, epigram-
matte sentences, he punctuates what he says
with nod He throws in an exclamation
point with nod. "Honor bright" is =
favorite relerution. " II won't dol" is an
other which he emphasizes with a shake of
the head He is more theatrical than
Beecber or Talmage. He peoples the plat
form with imaginary dummies, and then
fails them, to the delight of the audience.
BY constant recurrence to these he keeps
them before his audience. Tuesday night he
had rude dugout in which floated a ma
tive savage-one of. our ancesters-wth
teeth two inches in length, with a spoonful
of brains in the back of his head" This
to start with, he seemed TO place at a GER
tain spot on the stage, and when he went
over that way the audience instinctively
recalled his description, and was prepared
to hear something about the dugout.
Mr.. Ingersoll's voice is soft and melodi-
Gus. His manner. and movements upon
the stage,wth his wonderful nod, are the
elements ofh success as popular orator
Z" / was once in the company of fsome Bap-
tist minister's" said Ingersoll. 9" don't
know how ever got there, and they asked
my opinion as to baptism. said that with
soap regarded it as an excellent institu-
ton. Ifyou tell me what mans religion
is, I'll tell you what is the highwater mark
of his intellect-just how many he carries
to the pound. When man thinks he has
found it all out, he is orthodox. The man
in dugout is orthodox. Heresy is a era
die; orthodoxy is a coffin. Heresy is a
banner; orthodoxy is a shroud. Heresy
gives a new idea a welcome and a warm
place by the freside of his heart. Ortho
doxy regards the new idea as a tramp, and
keeps bull dogs in front of the house to
frighten off every new idea that comes
along"
Referring to the lowest form of skull that
had ever been found, he said that it was
probably found in Delaware.
"There has not been a paten'able i'm.
provement on the deyil for six thousand
years." said the lecturer "Ill tell what
causes bronchitis among the ministers. II
you talk 'solemnly when you don't feel it,
that makes bronchitis Did you ever hear
that an auctioneor had it. l cali it parson-
tits. [Laughter.] This is my doctrine Give
every other human being every right you
claim for yourself. Keep your mind open
to the influences of nature. Receive new
thoughts with hospitality. The religionist
of to-day wants the ship of his soul to lie al
the wharf of orthodoxy and rot in the sun.
| He delights to hear the sails of old opinion;
flap against the masts of old creeds He
loves to see the joints and the sides oper
and cape into the sun, and it is a kind o.
bliss for him to repeat, DO not disturb my
| opinions AS far as | am concerned, wish
to take my chances with the wind anG
wave and star. And had rather go dowr
in the glory and grandeur of the storm thar
to rot in any orthodox harbor whatever.
After all, we are improving from age t
age. The most orthodox people in the
country two hundred years ago would have
been buried for the crime of heresy. Th,
ministers who denounce me for expressing
my thoughts would have been in the In
QUESTION themselves. Our fathers worship
ped the golden calf The worst you car
say of the American now is that lie wor
ships the gold of the calf. Even the calf il
beginning to see this distinction. 1t NJ
longer satisfies the ambition.
"Where did that doctrine of eternal pun
ishment come from? 1t came from the low
and beastly skull of that wretch in the dug
out. Where did he get it? 1t was a sou
venir from the animals. The doctrine o
eternal punishment was born in the glitter
ing eyes of snakes that hung in fearful coils
watching for their prey. 1t was born of tn,
howl and bark and growl of wild beasts
1t was born of the grin of the hyenas, anC
of the depraved chatter of the unclean by
enas, | despise it with every drop of my
| blood. Tell me there is a God in the seren,
heavens that will damn the children for tn,
expression of an honest belief. Tell me tha
the dimpled darling rocking in its cradle i
to be kindlng wood for fire in hell. Il
there is a God, who is sending people into
this world to damn them forever, woulc
rather 60 to hell than to go to heaven anc
keep the society of such an infamous tyrant
"When the great ship containing th,
hopes and aspirations of the world wheI
the great ship freighted with mankind goe
down IN the night oi death, chaos and di
saster, am willing to go down with tn
ship, with those who love me, aud will
those whom have loved, and l will not b.
guilty Of the inefIable meanness of sneakinj
ashore in some orthodox canoe.
Pleading for liberty for the child, Mr.. In
gersol said; "The laugh of child will
make the holiest day more sacred still
Strike with hand of fire. Oh, weird music
ian, thy harp strung with Apollo's colder
hair; fill the vast cathedral aisles with sym
phonies sweet and dim, deft TOUGHER of th
organ keys; blow, buglar, blow, until tn!
silver notes do touch and kiss the moonli
waves, and charm the lovers wandering mi,
vine clad hills. But know, your sweetes
strains are discords all, compared with child
hoods happy laugh the laugh that fills tn
eyes with light and every heart with Joy
OF ripping river of laughter, thou art tn
blessed boundary line between the beast
aud men, and every wayward wave of thin
doth drown some fretful fehd of care. oil
laughter, rose Tipped daughter of joy, ther
are dimples enough in thy cheeks to cate
aud hold and glorify all the tears of grief"
sold Abe" the famous eagle carrie,
through the war for the Union by the Eight
Wisconsin Volunteer Infantry, has died il