The Pickens sentinel. [volume] (Pickens, S.C.) 1871-1903, 1881-10-27
HUMORS OF THE DAY.

hO"VnO VC DANs
WAS Ewes first dress made of bear
skin?
U SAruHAhLY look p Qliar if URIC
- and going to d K.-BiU Me.
IN soME hats the cabbage leaf must
ieel perfectly at home. .-Quincy Modern
ITgO.
INQUIEE The most horrible suicide
on records Is that of the man who took
drink OF Chicago water.-Bostop Post.
Ny father was Irish,
Ny mother was Irish
And am Irish stew.
-Ionkers Statesman
IT WAS probably an Irish missionary
who, when about to be masticated by
the cannibals, originated that beautiful
song:
WHEN you lose Il needle ON the floor,
the quickest way to find it is to take off
your shoes and walk about. But some
how people don't do that way
" GEsTIoULArIoN," says an eminent
actor, :! is fast becoming lost art p He
probably never saw Talmage fencing
with an imaginary lobster. - Herald
II. r.
AN ALBANY paper tells of woman i'll
THIS city who woke her husband during
storm and said: 'T DO wish you would
stop snoring, for ] want to hear it thun-
der f."
"CoNFoUND it you've shot the dog
| Thought you told me you could hold
gun. Pat" "Shurc, and so I can, your
honor. It's the shot, sor, couldn't
hOuld =
A BAD-TEMpERED MAN: He had lost his
knife and they asked him tho usual
question: "Do You know where you lost
lt?' Yes, yes" nc replied, "of course I
DO, I'm merely hunting in these other
places for it to kill time"
NOT every man can tell from exper-
lcnce how it feels to be struck by light
nlng, but he can get some idea of it by
gong suddenly around corner and
meeting his mother-in-law while he is
walking with pretty girl. - Boston
Post.
A KEoKUK man succeeded in hugging
his sweetheart to death. But he has no
trouble i'll finding others. The girls
seem rather anxious to take their chances
on his hugging them to death. They
don't belivo he can do it; would Just like
to see him try it.
AN IRISH lady was so much on her
guard against betraying her national ac-
cont that she is reported to have spoken
| OF the 'crcdtUrc of Vesuvius," fearing
that the crater would betray her again.
--1(60ny JOt1nal. She finds her paral-
lei III the Yankee who speaks Of the pill
Ioi0S OF n porticO.
| WHEN corpulent citizen endeavors to
Jump off the dummy of one of our cable
roads while on the down grade and falls
on tho track in the front of the wheels
nothing gives him so much genuine sat
1siation as, in$t when he is about to be
crushed to pulp, to wake up and find
himself on the floor beside his own bed.
-'SHn francisco Post.
How pcstcring little things will hap
pen. a stranger in a N1iddlesex County
village was looking for man named
Oudcck, and when he went up to q fell
low and asked care you Ondcck?" the
fellow answered. 'I reckon I am" and
the stranger tried to talk business to him
and they got ali mixed up in misunder-
standing and had to be parted by the
bystandcrs before they got through. And
1t was all on account of that confounded
name. B0%tON Post.
ENGLSH social life presents many
points of interests III its slang. We have
all probably read the anecdotc of II
young American lady in England mot n
''fnir Barbarian, rither) who, while play
ing crorkct, exclaimed ri Il surprisingly
fortunate shot OF an opposing player
con- what Al horril scratch > where
upon Il young English lady remarked /:
" You shouldn't use such language, it's
slang !" "Wcll, what should | say?"
asked Miss America. ooh what a
hcastlv hukc !'-~NcaO Orleans IT1ncS