National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1881-01-06
A TERRIBLE RISK.
How q Drugstore Clerk Injured q Mer
I'm the West End.

The dangers that pursue humanity are various
| and peculiar. Insurance companies exist that In
! sure against some of these, such as accidents to
life and limb by railway disasters, or even from
the injuries which liable TO be received in the
| ordinary course of events such as from the explo
4 sion of water-pipes, the running away of street
| cars, or the sudden sinking of canalboats, and q
| thousand other risks that flesh is heir to. But
there is class of accidents to which We are ali
subject and before which most people have
trembled and turned pale, but which from some
strange oversight on the part of insurance com
| panies is as yet uncovered by an open or shut
| policy. We allude to the drugstore risk.
There may have been a time in the remote past
| when the bakery or the butcher-shOp was more
necessary to the happiness of humanity than the
! drugstore, but this was before the race had be
come as handsome as it now is But, be that as ii
may, there are few persons who have not at some
time or other encountered the drugstore risk, and
felt that for the moment at least life hung on the
| balance. When, for instance, the clerk in charge
is called upon to put up some prescription, which
by careful use of hog Latin, together with kind
Of chirography such first used on the Egypt
ian obeisk, the physician has rendered doubly OBJ
scure and dangerous; when this occurs, and the
clerk has carelessly taken down bottle
| filled with some dire poison, the name OF
which may be plainly seen by the customer,
and while balancing it in his hand has turned the
point of joke neatly, and has thus put aside the
bottle calmly and taken in its place another
labelled syrup syplcis," as if the difference
were not worth mentioning, We feel in such
moment that we have been face to face with the
drugstore risk But there is another form of dan
ger to which the unthinking subject in drug
store and which, but for the recent experience of
young man by the name of Alexander McFOggle,
might have escaped the attention of the public.
Mr.. McFoggle resides or did reside until the late
melancholy event, which has blighted his hopes
and sent him adrift upon cruel world, in the
neighborhood of the West End
He chose this vicinity because it supported his
spirits to be known as living in a fashionable
ncighborhOod, and also because it was not far from
the dwelling of the object of his affections with
whom, the neighbors were wont TO remark, he had
engagements coming so close together that it re-
quired nice discrimination to know where the first
left off and the last begun.
In fact, Alexander McFoggle was engaged and
was looking forward to the near future TO conSum-
mate his happiness. But the Christmas season,
which brings joy and happiness to many, brought
only sorrow to the bright anticpations Of Alexan-
der On the day before, after really painful cen
sideration of various articles which it would be
appropriate and possible for him TO present as
Christmas gift to his intended bride, in an evil
of a ncighboring drug store. Here japanese
cnrio combining the features Of utter uselessneSs
and great pretensions, occurred to him just the
article he needed, and, after paying for the same,
he jUyfully asked the druggist to put it in box
and send it tomorrow to the residence of the lady
for whom il was intended.
This was done, and by little iudieious manu-
wiring Alexander managed TO be on hand at the
precise moment the box arrived. With eager but
concealed emotions he noted her surprise, and
watched her def fingers as they united the string
and brought the box to view. 1t was but moment,
and then shrek greeted his astonished ears, the
box was hurled violently at his head, and the re-
treating form Of the young lady, in a paroxysm OF
tears, vanished up the stairway. Astounded at
this treatment, and not knowing what to think,
Alexander picked up the box, and, gazing at the
lid, Mortified to read, in large capital letters,
these solemn words: " ONE GROSS OF SMALL NIP
Piles" The drug clerk had thrown another risk
upon the market and Alexander McFoggle is now
a wanderer upon the face of the earth.