Weekly graphic. [volume] (Kirksville, Adair Co., Missouri) 1880-1949, 1881-04-15
An Unsympathic Crowd.

An excited man rushed into drug.
store and exclaimed:
"Oh, my, I'm ruined. give me ten
ounces of campfire or whlsey. Give
me the whisky
He fell against the counter. His
eyes rolled back and his tongue hung
out.
What ails you, MANI" He drew
back his tongue, said 'Snake.bit!
and shot it out again.
Whisky, snake bite
How did you get snake-bit?" asked
the physician, taking hold of the man s
hand and feeling his pulse. The tom
que went in and the words "foolin
with rattlesnake" came out.
Where did 1t bite vou?"
Right here he replied. exhibiting
a small black hole on the back of his
hand
Where did you get the snake:s'
Museum, Gimme some whisky
This hole was made ny lead pencil"
Lead pencil?" said the victim, con.
temptously: made by the pizen fang
of copperhead.'
Thought it was rattle snake
Didn't say it was rattlesnake. Oh,
I'm dying. Dying in civilized land.
Dying within forty miles Of home!
To think that | have Travelled all over
the snake countries, and then to come
back and be killed by common black
snake.
Thought it was a copperhead:"
Now. here, said the man, untang-
ling his eyes and stifening himself:
1t don't make any difference what you
think, I'm dying from the effect of a
snake bite. That's about as much as
you want to know. A gallon OF whis-
ko will save my life. Am | among
human beings?
just then red-faced man stuck his
heaC into the store, and yelled:
Come on, Bill. Them fellows
wouldn't care if you was swallowed by
a booycOnstructcr.
The tongue went back into the
the evidence OF suffering passed
away. and the victim took up his hat
and joined his companion.
How wide Is broad daylight
New York News.
a Shapely hand-Four aces and
king Keokuk Gate City.
A put-up iob-The physicians pre-
scription.- New York News.
When man "sits down on YOU 1t
is nearly as bad as standing rebuke.
Its long time between drinks" in
Wisconsin, n. Y. Commercial Adver-
tiser.
Modesty is such a rare possession
that most persons blush to own it
New York News.
A Mexican with ninepence in his
pocket is considered real gentleman.
i Boston Globe
Blessed are the poor in furniture,
ior they will get moved cheap.1[New
FORK Commercial.
"Women:" said an expert; we'll
'ome of them are worse than others,
out none are better"
The man whose only claim to sane
ity is along face should dispose of a
portion of his cheek Whitehall
Times.
This is the season of the year when |
nature emulates art and turns her at
ention to spatterwork, YonkerS Ga
ette.
Are theatrical performances very
CIRCUS? So many people, you know,
70 out between the acts to SMILE
Philadelphia sun.
New York consumers have complain.
. bitterly of the igh price of coal
It the dealers haye kindly reduced
wages of coal shovelers.-I Philadel-
- ;, News.
a., Tres the confection" is the Bos-
Ae9Ii translation of Takes the
R"s S;m ilarity, 1.-The proper caper'
VOC 9Th correct contortion, =
- s,o Times.
:, so . dimes con 'plains that making
'r. Il mot not so e. esy as sliding down
Sc (, is exposing himself to the con-
'n ~ n, y Sweet 81 niger OF Michigan.
Boston Pc 81.
W. c,,um,. ia Spectator tells OF a
1 dv Who bee, sme suddenly f'ch anu