The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1881-02-19
MISCELLANEOUS.

My dear" said q sentimental lover to his
dearie, - Of what do these autumnal tints, this
glowing baldric OF the sky, this blazing garniture
Of the dying year, remind your " Pancakes,
she promptly answered.
To KEEP OFF MosQUITOEs.-A young friend of
mine (sayr u writer in Naftve) severely bitten by
mOSquitOes and unwilling to be disGsured, /,
sent for quassia chips and had boiling water
poured upon them. At night. after washing
she dipped her hands into the quassia water and
Ieft it 10 dry on her face This a perfect
protection, and continued to be whenever
applied.
lady attired in profound Grape entered a car
and abandoned herself to melancholy. A woman
behind her. with red nose, green veil, and blue
sPectacles, leaned forward, and enquired-" Lost
somebody barely perceptIble nod answered
the question without inviting another. but the
inquisition proceeded. Father 2'' A shake.
a. Brother p shake. a. Husband 2" nod.
" Church member ?" A nod. ." Life insured ?''
A ned. "a Then what yOu moping about
He's all right, and so are you
A gentleman being threatened with an infec-
tious fever said to his little son, who In an
affectionate mood wished to embrace him, - You
mustn't hug me you'll catch the fever Wifi.
standing back, looked in amazement uPon his
papa, who by-the-Way % a pettern Of propristy
an'.-s -icLt5 asked, - Why, rapa, who did you
Lug2''
An old coachman meets. -sser ut Scotch
railway station, having E-d several - halves'
during his wait, Siaster, fling {" w hats this,
JohnT 1 set the smell Of iiskey of you again
John: 's " eel. reei, my iSrd, I've felt the smell
O. uhusky OF yOu mOny time, and l ne'er said
OUGHT abOot it ~
In discussion in q board Of aldermen, while
they were debating q proposition to supply
new style Of lamp-pOsts, one member got up and
innocentIy remarked that be. for one, had always
found the old ones good enough to stand BY"
Alta yery successful concert given by the Yale
GIee Club a young lady listener noticed Captain
IIutchinstOn of the ball nine, on the stage, and
inquired Of her escort IL he was not first bass.
- oh, no. responded her gallant escort, who
was evidently thinking OF the victory over Har-
ward lie - short stop" " A half smOthered
laugh brought the young gentleman TO q know
ledge Of the fact that he was attending concert
and not ball game
L Mary JOnes, have you given the goldfish
ir.nh yEnfer? No ma'am What's the use ?
They hayen't drank up what's in there yet.
X who has not been rich long has one OF the
nobbiest turuOuts, but does not manifest any de-
sire To invite friend % take a drive with him.
Why the deuce do you put on % many airs y
asks a friend you never ask me to get IN. -
why my dear fellow, il there were two Of US
in the carriage how on earth would people know
to which Of Us it beIOnged?"
Young Fred . bashfuI yet persistent swHin.
was very much In love with sister Hannah Jane
One night she told him In hsr tsnderest tone.
at is not good for man to be alone"
Said Fred Just 80. you darling little elf.
i've often thought OF that same thing myself"
Then snfd the lass while Fred all agog.
You ought 10 buy yourself = terrier dog
"Oh, dear " exclaimed young lady enter
ing q public hall the other evening '' what
dreadful Odor Of carburetted hydrogen "
- Mum7" " said the janitOr with puzzled coun-
tenance. I" The smell Of the earburetted hydro
gen." she explained. - That's no kind o gin,
mum. replied the jani'Or; ''-that's garss the
pipe is leaky-
Z" See here" said fault-fnding husband to
his vile, . We must have things arranged IN this
house so that We shall know where everything 10
kept" With all my heart." she sweetly
answered, " and let US begin with your late
hours, my love, l should dearly like to know
were they are kept" He lets things run on as
usual.
Minister TO Rory Why weren't you at the
kirk on Sunday ?" Rory was at Mr.. Dun
laps kirk Minister" l don't like your run
ming ah>1. to strange kinks in that way N t
that Ject tae your hearing Mr. Dunlap. but
Ia re % widna like your sheep straying
away nto strange pastures" Rory widna
cafe grair "a, if 1t were better grass"