The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1881-09-10
Weather Indications.

are TO have rising followed by falling
barometer, with northeast to southwest
winds, and higher or lower temperature,
with clear or partly cloudy weather. and
light rains. How is it they contrive TO
tell SO accurately about the weather?
DO you understand it?''
certainly replied Mr.. Spoopen-
ayke; they do it by observation. They
nave man out West observing, and a
man down East who observes, and fell
lows observing around in different parts
OF the country. They put all their OBJ
servations together, and we know lust
what it's going to do"
- suppose that's what makes the
WIND 80 different every morning. When
one mans temperature Is rising, an
others falling; and when one is clear
all the rest are partly cloudy, with"
"No they amt Each observer sends
IN what he observes, and then the chief
makes up his mind from those reports
what the weather will be. Can't you
understand"
Perfectly" said Mrs. Spoopendvke.
rubbing her elbows. elf one sees the
barometer rising and another sees it
railing, and its cold in one place and
cloudy in another, they all say so. But
l should think when one hits it rioht
the other would be awful mad.''
r" What would they get mad aboutP''
demanded Mr.. Spoopendyke. You don't
imagine that they all get together and
light it out, do you? They take the
weather from different points and COM
bine it, and they parcel it out among
the different regions. For instance, il
it SHOWS in the East and is warm in the
West, they strike an average for the
Lake region. Now, what is the average
between heat and snow?'
RAIN" cried Mrs. Spoopendyke,
delighted with her sagacity, Il see
how it is now. They take what IS usu-
ally going on and equalize it all over
the country. Pm glad the Democrats
weren't elected"
- What have they get to do with it?
Do you think q barometer is a politi-
clamp
No. But if the Democrats had been
elected they would have to change it all
around. wouldn't they? And the South
would have got the best share. That's
what the Repub--''
''Blast the Republicans! They've got
no more to do with it than you have.
You have got an idea that they throw
the barometers and observers into one
end of steam-engine, and the weather
comes out of the other. They don't
make the weather. The weather makes
itself. 1t is the only self-supporting
thing about the Government. And these
signal men only watch it and tell what
It's going to be-
{" suppose when these observers all
get together and talk it over, that is
called storm-center, isn't it?'
" That's it!' shouted Mr. Spoopen-
dyke. "You've got the weather now
All you want now is your name painted
on the handle and the spring broken to
be an umbrella. They don't talk it
over; they tell you all they know, and
it's fixed up in Washington. They agree
on it here, and then they telegraph it
all around everywhere. 1t is gener-
ally made in Manitoba and sent down
here"
How wideis itP' asked Mrs. Spoop-
endyke, deeply interested. Because,
if it isn't too big l should think they
might stop it,
a feet just about as wide as YOUR
measily information. How're they 60
ing to stop it? Think it jaws the
sleeping car conductor because there's
only an upper berth leftp Well, it
don't. 1t hires horsem howled Mr.
Spoopendyke, "and the only way to
stop it is to build a fence around it.
There was some talk about burning the
last one, but the wood was wet"
swell, my dear, you needn't get
angry about it, said Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, soothingly. 81 only thought
there might be some way they could
make some arrangements about it, |
think storm centers are horrid, and the
observer in Manitoba must have hard
time. If he has to observe much in the
winter he must be nearly frozen"
"Does any human being know what
you are thinking about?' raved Mr.
Spoopendyke. "Do you s'pose he goes
around with spyglass looking behind
rocksp Think he prowls around all
night with lantern hunting up storm
centersp Got an idea that he runs
round under the bed with broom, like
a married woman know of, and when
he catches center pulls him out by the
leg and observes himP He don't do
anything of the sort. He has them to
spend the evening with him, and gets
them drunk and finds out what they're
up to. Understand it nowP All you
want is to whirl round twice and squeak
nights to be weathervane."
Il didn't know how they did it."
quoth Mrs. Spoopendyke complacently,
"but 1 see now. If the Prohibitionists
had been elected he couldn't have done
that, and we should have been in a
bad way. Now that l understand it
I'll learn the indications every morning.
How does the barometer rise and fallP"
with cork-screws," Numbered Mr..
Spoopendyke. Sometimes they haul
it up with stump-machine; then they
drop carpenters shop on it. When it
gets very low they blow it up with gun
cotton. Once in Dakota it got so high
they had to dig hole and ram it down
with spile-driver. Got it nowP Be-
gin to see through itP What you need
is box of pills and conundrum to be
an almanacr' And Mr.. Spoopendyke
jumped out of the house like conical
o,oI honool fha Joo, ofta. b;,1,