The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1881-06-09
Qarietu.
VARIETY SCRAPS.
parlOr organ-A society paper.

parlor organ-A society paper.
Proper color for driving coat-Je hu.
Love knots should be tied with single beau,
dentists sign-Drawlng, music and dancing.
1t is cold spring when a frog jumps into
we'll.
Is six button kid any relative of sick buttln'
goat2
Which Of the reptiles is a Mathematician The
adder.
Why is feline sitting up straight like Niagara3
Because 1t is cat erect.
Electricity IN Franklin's time was a wonder
how we make light Of It,
An "elecrric" hatr.brush must be a good thing
for shock headed prople.
The land speculator is always ready to show
the sites to his customers.
The corkscrew finds the longest way round the
safest way thro Ugh the cork.
The tea.ketle must be saddest when 1t sings,
for then it is that it has boil.
Captain Ead's ship railroad is no new ldea
Charon pulled boat er styx.
When man applies for situation as police.
man 1t Is supposed he has a tase for club life
Why cannot gentleman legally possess a short
walking stickH Because 1t can never be long to
him.
A temptation for milkmen to emigrate to Kan.
sas Is the fact that extensive chalk beds exist
there.
The construction OF cannon Of large calibre
does much to increase the debt o. nations (detona
tions)
"This is a marked feature OF the OCCASION"
said gentleman who had his nose lattened at a
picnic.
The reporter who was detailed to write up the
execution of two murderers said he'd see 'em
hanged first,
Patrick on he zebra; "Pwat kind of a baste is
thal?-the mule wild his ribs on the outside of his
skin entoirely"
Why is the money you are in the habit of Civ.
ing TO the poor like newly'OOrn babe2 Because
It's precious little.
A writer says; "The brave are always tender"
What cowardly bird the average boarding house
chicken must have been.
Cuoumbers are only ten cents each. That's
cheap enough for the cucumber, but it's the
funeral that costs like thunder.
The abscOnsion OF that sash manufacturer and
the consequent closing up Of his place, nay be
regarded as very unsatisfactory
When key was called for and gentleman
pulled out corkscrew, some one remarked that
1t was the key that unlocked his gait,
Latest arguments against tobac;o o-The most
powerful engines do not last more than thirty
years because they're always smoking,
1t was tramplng printer who swapped boots
with sleeping wayfarer and Chalked on the sole
Of the worst pair unidentified exchange"
The skipper who bumped his vessel on the
rocks so hard 1t Jared his dog overheard said his
boat was on the shore and his bark was on the
sea.
Agreat many peoples morality resembles sign.
posts at the corner Of country roads, They point
In the right direction, but they don't bulge an
inch themselves
Remember whom you are talking to, sir" said
an indignant parent to a facetious boy, II am
your father" Well, who's to blame for that2'
said the young impertinenCe "taint me-"
NelBhDoI pretty uauBnIeE- how muCn Ii Inls
a yardP" Draper's son desperate spoons" on
her)-"only one kiss" Neighbours pretty dsugh.
teri will take three yards; grandma will pay"
A man thanked girl who gave her his sea in
a street car, and he married her aud proved to De
worth 100000. eve circulate this lie in the hope
Of inducing the girls to be a little more courte.
ous)
There is nothing In the world to compare with
the glue obtained from ounce seed to make those
awfully lovely curls, OF all sorts OF shapes and
sizes, which lie upon the marble brow OF the girl
OF the period like mashed sngleworm on a
front stem