Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1881-04-13
"CoId This Morpin. ~


down in front of me and turned aroun,
and faced me:
Cold, this mornin. he said.
l folded my paper, and famed mysel
with it vigorously moment or two before
replied. Then / unbuttoned my Goa
(prIvate to editors:' 1t was originally &
three-button coat but the exigencies of III,
season, the long absence from home, anC
the necessity of dropping som ething into
the contribution basket every time go t.
church has reduced it to the minimum oi
one, wiped my fngid brow with my hand.
kerchlef, and said in painting tones:
4 don't find it So
The man looked astonis he'd. But pre-
sently he SAID.
= Maybe you've been rum ng,S
No. replied, Il have been asleep for
the past two hours, In sleigh
And ye didn't feel coldl' the man IN
quired-
Man y said, in tones of amszement,
cold, on the 9th OF Junel'
June p he echoed, Strengthening up,
are You crazyl It's the 9th of January
We'll, said, lit felt like the 9Th of
uuc W Ilt.
NTt's mighty fine sleighln', all the same,
the man SAID.
| told him without q blush. that / had
never seen the mud worse on Ohio roads
since l could remember.
Where on earth,' he asked, in u tier
astoniahment, did you come fromf
Dayton said.
His eyes began to creep out and look at
each other over the top of his nose.
'WhenF he asked.
This morning. l sand calmly, since
eight o'clock
How he fairly shouted.
In one-horse sleigh, l said.
'Sakes alive y he shrieked, it is impos-
sible. It's only eleven O'Clock now, and
Dayton Is fifty miles away J.
Couldn't help It, | insisted. q left
there little over two houIs ago in a
sleigh, had poor horse, drove slowly,
and the mud was up to the hubs of the
wheels all the way. 1t was warm as May
and / seen enough now 20 make one boy
slide in five thous and miles
The mans hair Stood on end, and he got
up to start of for the other end OF the
car.
If you amt crazy, and l believe you
be, he said, with grave earne Itness, ''you
are an awfal liar
Good man, i said, 4 expect / am, but
am not fool. i may tell startling lies
but do not talk like an ass, and l would
be thought liar or maniac, rather than
an imbecile. / do not come into car
where the thermometer marks three de-
grees below Zero, and tell living, breath
ing, intelligent, sensitive man that II is
cold, just as though was imparting some
information to him. do not watch him
drive up to the train in sleigh, spinning
over the Try, wisp snow, on the smooth,
perfect pixies of Ohio, and then attempt to
Instract, amuse, or startle him by telling
hun the sleighing is good. / would rather
astonish man than bore him, If have
nothing better to tell him than something
he knows already, far better than do, my
mouth is sealed, and will never speak.
In order to astonish him or startle him
may have to lie to him, but that Is better
than boring him. You might as well sit
down and tell me that twice two is four as
to tell me that it is cold. You might as
well tell me that George Washington is dead
as to tell me the sleighing Is good. Go
away, good man go to sleep. tell you 1t
is June, there is no snow; there is dust and
there are roses. 1t is two hundred miles
from Dayton to Loveland, and l walked
from the north pole this morning Go get
thee,to nunnery, and when you can model
your conversation on something beside the
United States Signal Service reports, come
aud wake Inc up and hold me in the
matchless charm of your instructive talk
know not what course others may take,
but as for me, gaul blast the man who
talks to me about the weather."
And straightway the man ariz and got
him unto the afterwood-box, for he was
sore astonished. And as l fell into
slumber the forgotten dreams of which
contained mere real, valuable information
than that man ever did or ever will know,
!. heard him opening conversation with
the taciturn brakeman by reInarking.
Cold this morninf'