Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1881-01-20
HER AND THEE II.

'sWhy should We celebrate Washing
tons birthday more than mine p askt d
teacher. because he never told lie!"
shouted q little boy.
A white oak tree, believed TO be tina
biggest in the State, was cut near Fay ette.
Mo-, last week. 1t was 10 feet 3 inches
across the stump, and the ftst cut made
1922 eight. inch railroad ties.
A Connecticut man went to an elms-
house for wife, thinking she would most
appreciate the advantages Of home, and
two weeks after marriage she got as mad
as hornet because he would not get her
sealskin sacque.
man was hshed out OF the gutter this
morning and taken to the hospital. He
was suffering from an attack of jim-or
rather we should say malarisl fever caused
by bad drainage He used his throat for
DRAIN Cincinnati Gazette.
We don't wish to shock anybody by
doubling the truth of Mother SYMPTOMS
prophecy, but any person with cash to put
up, who desires TO bet Oh the fultillment
of the prophecy. can be accommodated by
calling at this otfice.-Bostoas Post.
1t is perfectly proper to speak of mans
magnificent doms of thought, or his Web
sterian brow but when you speak of a red
headed gentleman AZ the man with n
gilded dome, ten chances to one he will
not feel hattered. Boston Transcript
Robinson (aftor long whist bout at the
cIub)-"It is awfully late, Brown. What
will you say to your wife2' Brown Cn a
whisper)-"Oh, l ehant say much, you
know. Good morning, dear or some
thing of that sort. She'll say the rest"
Some of those Nautch girls are so pretty
that DAILY viii! have hard time convincing
the New York public that they were not
imported from Philadelphia -Philddel-
phta Neios. just 90. They arc said to be
homely enough to stop CLOCK, k,-Bost07a
Post
II is now in order among sqlint-eyed,
snubnosed women to refer to George
Eliot's" "lack of beauty" They know
how it is themselves, poor things! But
Georges lack OF beauty was only skin
deep, which is not always the ease.-B0s-
ton Transcript
New England doctor has disoov'
cred that older drinking causes rheuna-
tiam. He needn't think that this will
scare folks out of drinking it. Don't men
huOH thhS iui1 hiihhihk Cao5Sc
and yet nino men out of 10 will accept sn
invitation to irrigate. It's weak attempt
doctor. Boston Post.
If she's got to talk slang Boston girl
will refine and beautify it, The proper
csper becomes the appropriate gyration
bang up ia front hair elevated; tumblipg
to the racket is falling to the audible dis
turbsnce, and square deal quadrilateral
distribution. Oh, refinement is q great
thing. oh, you wager your existence that
it is.
The IL Southern States, with popula-
,ion of SPA ,004, have enrolled in the
public schools 1878, 822 children. The
average salary paid to male teachers is
$34 81, and to females $3l01. The total
income of all these schools is $13 7lS, ,6G5,
Missouri having the largest amount. The
schools are improving greatly iu condition
and in support oil over the South.
Eater Jones, the magnificent, with
stranger-"A little surprise for you, Mrs.
j. Let me introduce Mrs Virgins, whom
/ have persuaded 10 take his chance, and
come and try potluck with us; and hope
you won't stsrye him, hey, my love? ?''
| Mrs. Jones (courtesyine) )-"rhere's no
fear of that, Mr.. Wiggins. I got my
husbands telegram in time"
Minister to Rory-''Why weren't you al
the kirk on Suuday?' Rory-"I was al
Mr.. Dunlops kirk" Minister-'I don't
| like your running about the strange kirBs
in that way. Not that l object tae yer
hearing Mr.. Dunlop, but Pm shur ye
wadna like yer ain sheep straying ava,
into strange pastures" R5ry-'1 wsdna
| pir ~ IL haftar '
Judy.
A step slide,
A frantic glide,
A derlous plunge between;
| A kick To the l. #, Il rush to the right
They must be crazy obey can't be rlght)
| On what can such actions mean?
YOU'RE very green
Or you could have seen
| This exercise before.
The knowledge you lack, 1t
| Would teach you the racquet"
'rls that aud nothing mnr'."
Chicago has levied license tax of $5t
on each street car, which will bring
$40. 600 yearly into the city treasury, an6
Judge Drummond of the United States
Court, has decided, in refusing petition
for an injunction, that such license is {
suitable exercise of the ''police" power
As tax it would be illegal owing to guar
antees in the horse car charters agains
city taxes.
The thrush in the thicket ia singing,
The lark ID abroad on the lea,
And over the garden gate swinging
maiden il waiting for me-
She wilt wait ill she's weary, I'm thinking,
Though eager am for the tryst;
She VIII wait till the bright stars are blinking,
Aud sigh for the kisses she missed.
For her father is watchful and wary
very i-tempered old cnurl-
Aud I'm not the eOrt of canary
10 be kicked for the love OF a girl,
The Chicago city authorities have yer,
properly confined their war on oleomarRa
rine, butterine upd other butteric com
pounds to compelling manufacturers t,
stamp plainly their internal products
Then if any man would eat let him ca
All the public wGEts is to have an oppor
tunity to know what il is eating on tn
principle upon which Artemus Ward at
hash, because he said then he always kne'
what be was eating.
Said Thomas ones,
In gleefnl tones,
! unio his sOn aud Heir;
'N our nosr'H exact
I Like mine-a feet,
Ny son. do itcarel'
'SOt quite 50 red,h
Yonng hopeful said,
At daddy'r nose lie squinie),
''Some folks prefer ,-
, High colors, sir,
Rut like sobor iuts!"
- Boston Transcript.
Public opinion on the subject of faitf
less husbands is very strong in Somerset
Ky. Mr.. Love was that kind of o
offender His wife led mob against hin
He fled hastily, without coet, trousers, G
boots with the crowd il close pursui
At the end of mile he was overtaker
and left suspended, head downward, frol
q tree He was almost frozen 10 deaf
, when, two hours afterwards, human
, preacher cut him down.
/ "Goin' to hang up your stocking Chris
| mas 2" asked Chicago man TO Bosto
girl who is visiting his sister, II sha
certainly suspend my hosiery she sait
; looking kindly at him over her eye glesse
, "because ] think the beautiful custom {
.. bestowipg upon our friends those thing
. we think they will appreciate should /
adhered to- He put copy If Emerson
works, Jos Cooks lectures, some annotate
lectures on biology. and two boxes I
chewipg-gum into her blue but long stocl
, ing last Friday evening, and ia now HI
: affisnced oyster buy Philadelphia 1el
9 graph.
Chinese quack doctors do large bus
ness in San Francisco. The large class {
;, ignorant people, who elsewhere resort
;. sickness to clairvoyants, there go to Ii
u Ohipsmen, whose horrible mixtures
! reptiles and other things have frequent
:. been described. II was lately disoovert
= that the most noted of these practitione
o vas in ths employ of white speculgtor