The weekly Arizona miner., 1881-07-15
DsclA4sTlGg OF INF fUDENGE.
DELIVERED BY W r. HOLDEN AT THE ''HoRRI.
 BLE' CELEBRATION, JULY 1. 1881.

Boy. now rampant in Cachise County, who
 have assumed, not among the great and
 glorious nations Of the earth. but neal
 the ancient and honorable pueblo that
 slumbers peacefully on the peiucid banks
 of the Santa Cruz. a separate and defiant
 station to which the laws of nature do
 not entitle them, a decent respect to the
 old Hassayampers lmpels Us 10 state our
 horrible views on the subject.
 We hold these truths to b. se!f-evident
 that the Cow Boys are endowed with an
 immensity Of cheek; that when they
 formed a separate organization to commit horrible deeds without asking our consent,
 it IS the duty of all loyal Horribles to as-
 slst in giving them the Grand Bounce Prudence will indeed dictate that the : Veteran Horribles be immediately sent to ! the rear headed by their celebrated band,
 and exprience hath shown that our orator
 and poet should be placed in the front rank. This corps has suffered long and patiently and such Is now the necessity
 which compels them to take refreshments.
 that beer should be brought on in unlim- itcd quantities The history of the Cow Boys is filled with the most hideous
 crimes and unknown barbarities.
 To prove this let facts be submitted to a candid world; they influenced our last Legislature to such an extent that the above mentioned bill was badly sat down
 upon shortly after its birth. It was by their means that We were deprived of a chance to get our clutches on the barrel containing the $l0,OO0 appropriated in this bill: they have endeavored to prevent the population of this Territory. by so intiInidating the last Legislature that no Omnibus Divorce Bills were introduced. and then all our hopes of rivaling the Indiana Divorce Courts were blighted. A large immigration of divorce-seeking coup les was thereby diverted from its legitI- mate channel They have burned barns. neglected hen-roosts, and only driven of about three-fourths of our cattle into Mexico. They have cut of our immense trade wite the Antarctic Ocean. via Gran iJe Creek. They have prevailed on the powers that be to create Cachise County. and a multitude Of new offices of which We have received none. They have i'm posed To taxes on Us and without paying out two-thir,ls of our property in taxes, We would not be an unhappy people.
 They have constrained our fellow citizens. and kept them from their regular mint tulips and beer. They have busted up the printing ring and divided the apples of discord between Beach and Tucker and left Gosrer out in the cold They have brought Jno. A Walsh of the Santa Fe Star Route Line into conjunction with the comet and a telegram has just been received stating that he is coming out to pay the boys of.
 in every sttIge of these -oppressioa.v Ye have petitioned in the most humble terms 1 to be sent to the rear. Our repeated pe- titions have only been answered hy repeat | ed injury ,and now We rise like a mighty av- alanche. hurling all before us and plaintive- | ly cry out: Good Governor, Let us Go.
 Nor have We been wanting in attention to our Chinese brethern. We have warn | ed them from time to time that they | must not eat rats and luice. We have | pelted them on the streets with rotten | eggs and missiles of every description and pulled their queues but they meek ly bore 1t all They have been deaf to our every entreatv. and henceforth our watchword shall be: ''Ths Chinese must go.
 We have also paid some attention to tine comet We have tearfullv and pa- tiently sat up all night, braced up by Rabies beer. that we might behold it in all it's beauty i'll the morning. We have | comm nicated with it by telephone and warned 1t not to approach too near us or to attempt to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. IT tonight. fellow YOU will look out from the glare of our illuminated town into the starry heavens. you viii perceive iog down on the edge of the horizon. bright stranger pursuing its path across the sky. Amidst the starry hosts that keep their watch, 1t saiaes attended by 2 bright pomp and fol- lowed by broader train. + is the only one of the heavenly bodies that has had nerve enough to join these illustrious IInT-ibles in their orgies on this our natal day. l. has eyidel,tly produced an effect on our City Fathers. a2 they have ordered all powder magazines to be removed out side the corporation limits Wemust, there fore >orrowfully acquiesce in the necessity which compels us to separate from Thee, Oh, Mighty One. and trust that you will play a more prominent part ill our next 
 We, therefore, the United Corps of Horrbles, appealing to the empty stom- achs of the good people here assembled, do in the name and by the authority of our good looking captain and drum major. solemnly publish and declare that these Horribles are, and, of right, ought to be, free and voracious punishers of pork and leans; that they are willing to estab- fish peace with good dinner, contract al- dances with all the butchers and grocers in the Territory, establish free restaurants and do all other acts and things which such a magnificent set of men may of light do. And ill support of this doctrine we mutually pledge each other our fortunes, our last dinner and our bottom dollar.
 l. seems to Us rather extravagant on the