The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1881-12-23
VOL. XXV---NO. 81.
VARIETIES.

The first song ever composed in England
was a Christmas carol in Anglo Norman
French.
Country clergyman have made arrange
ments to deliver slippers by the thousand
to wholesale shoe dealers in the city.
Heap on more wood THE wind is chill
But let 1t whistle as 1t will
wen keep our Christmas merry STILL
els it law you're talking about ?" said
Pat. Look, now, when l was soldger |
shot twenty men for the Queen, and she gave
me pinshin, but if was only 10 shoot one
stray fellow for myself, bedad, I'd be tried
for murder. There's law for yez."
An Oil City man purchased small
hand bellows, took it home, and told his wife
he had concluded to blow his brains out
whereupon she replied that smaller seized
bellows would have answered the purpose
better.
AT wedding recently, when the clergy
man asked the lady, "Wilt though have this
man to be thy welded husband? ?" she, with
modesty which lent her beauty an addi-
tional grace, replied, eff you please"
Il am going to the other church, after
this" said the pious cobler. "Ah, and WHY
SOP" asked the minister. Well, if you don't
get your shoes made at my shop, l won't get
my preaching done at yours" and off he
went.
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us
back to the decisions of our childish DAYS;
that can recall to the old man the pleasures
of his youth that can transport the sailor
and the traveller, thousands of miles away,
back to his own freside and quiet home.
-"I'm q very sick man." observed the
tramp languidly, as he anchored himself at q
restaurant table, "the doctor says must have
strengthening food. Give me something with
plenty iron in it," The waiter shaded the
corners of his mouth and beloved in stem
torian tones: zone keg of nailsr'
Carol, carol, Christians,
Carol joyfuly
Carol for the coming
OF Christ's nativity,
And pray gladstone Christmas
For all good Christian men.
Carol, carol. Christians,
For Christmas comes again.
Congressman Cox paints this beautiful
picture of life in Norway: ave see no beg
gary, no poor houses, ov Iaiis; we hear of no
crimes of violence. NO locks are neede,f
upon doors. Drunkenness is rare. They love
music and flowers are devoted to their
faith and their families. They are never idle.
Even the girls are knitting while attending
sheep and cows"
Outrageous proceedings: An old fellow,
whose daughter had failed to secure a posi-
ton as teacher in consequence of not passing
an examination, said "They asked her lots
of things she didn't know. Look at the his
tory questions! They asked her about things
that happened before she was born How
was she going to know about them? Why
they asked her about old George Washington
and other men she never knew That was
a pretty sort of examination ~
-Fitznoode was out again worrying the
life out of the ducks with his shotgun, He
blazed away at some ducks, and an unseen
man on the opposite side of the pond rose up,
threateningy, with long gun, and called out
Odd you shoot at me?"
Did any of the shot hit your" inquired
FitZnoode.
"Yes, they did, said the man rubbing his
legs.
"Then you may be certain l didn't shoot
at you. never hit anything shoot at"