Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1881-09-15
A Hitch.
lBrOoklyn Eagle,


Il hate to see hith in weddin'," remark
ed farmer from out Jamaica way, as he
dropped into the Eagles counting room with
a nuptial notice. 1T looks bad and it makes
talk"
Anything wrong about this wedding -
asked the clerk as he made change for the
old man.
Nothing positively wrong, but it didn't
launch like want to see thin, IS of that kind
You have seen by The notice that Buck
Thomas was marry m Mary Biff, and at one
time we began to think they never would
get through that ceremony"
What was the hitch ?"
why, Buck is Methodist and Mary is a
Plscopalian, and as one wanted one service
and the other another, they patched up some
kind OF scheme to have both. Neither
wouldn't 90 to the others church, but each
had their own minister, and the weddin'
come off in the school house. The Pts
copal minister married Mary, and the
Methodist minister undertook to marry
Buck, and there they were takin' alternate
whacks at the thing, and neither paying any
attention to the other The Methodist
brother fired off a sermon first, and the bride
sat down and went to sleep. Then the Pts
copalian said as how weed dropped in to see
that woman jned, but he wouldn't say who
to, and wanted to know if there was any OBJ
jections. That started up the Methodist,
who began to ask Buck if he knew what a
solemn business he was peggin at, and if he
really meant trade. All that time the Pts
copalian was howlin' around about this
woman and Mary was sayin she'd do this
and that and the other The Methodist was
marryin' away ON his side and finally they
brought up agin stump"
'How's that?" asked the clerk
well, the 'Piscopalian wouldn't recognize
Buck or his minister, and the Methodist
wouldn't have nothin' to do with Mary or
her preacher and there was no way of gettin'
'em together. Everythin' was all ready ex-
cept askin' them if they'd take each other,
and neither one of 'em would do it. Mary
and Buck were standin hand in hand and
the crowd was gettin' hungry?"
How did they get through it ~
They had to compromise. They wrangled
around for time and finally Buck spoke up
of his own accord and said he'd take Mary
for his welded wife, and then Mary Clipped |
in and said she'd take Buck for her husband.
At that we all cheered and hollered But !
there they pumped on another snag."
I'm what respect 2" inquired the clerk.
because tnerC was no one TO pronounce
'em man and wife. Buck tried to reason
Mary into lettin' the Methodist do that part,
and Mary argued with Buck and tried to
persuade him into listenin' to her preacher;
but it was no use. That brought another
row, and as it was gettin' nigh on to dark,
we all felt that something ought to be done,
as we'd been there most all day"
well, did they get married 2" asked the
tired clerk
Yes; we fixed it up. The ministers were
settin' pretty mad at each other, but they
agreed that they'd each attend to their own
lock, so the Methodist said, 4 now pro-
lounce you man, and the 'Piscopalian said, 4
low pronounce you wife, and they let it 90
It that. Then Buck paid the Methodist, and
he 'PiscOpalian wanted to know where he
,ame in. Buck said he'd hired his man, and
)aid him, and, as he was not responsible for
lis wife's fOOlishness before marriage, her
)arsOn could whistle for his wealth guess
here'll be a lawsuit about it, for the 'Pisco- s
,alian says he'll have half of that fl We dollars
it takes a leg short off to the armpit. {
lon't like to see them bitches at weddin's. 1t [
lOn't look right and it amt business"
With which reflection the old man but
oned up his change and drove home in deep '
Meditation.