davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
WIT AND WISDOM.

FROM the prices that some physi-
clans charge. one can readily imagine
that high heals are fashionable.
tom Commercial BnSLetinL
Gold ore and deposit i'm the saw
ings bank are very much the same, in
| asmuch as they are both money in &C.
crued state. YaUcOb Strauss.
lightning struck spotted cow
near Medina, o., and turned her jet
black in the twinkling of an eye. That
why Ohio women crawl under the bed
| when the thunder begins to roli.-De-
troll Free Press.
Here q positive fact that occurred
in one of the public schools in this city
recently: A small boy was asked to
name some part of his own body. He
thought moment and then replied:
Bowels. which are five in number-a,
g, j, o and u, and sometimes W and y"
-Rht,atleipltia Bulletin. /.
The inmates of boarding house in
West Fourteenth street are nightly dis
turbcd by ghost. He appears as n
big fat man, and then gradually dwin-
dies in stature until he finally dissolvcS
into nOthingness. 1t is believed that he
is the spirit of boarder who lived in
the house for numbered years. Puck.
young lady out in Idaho, aud the in
suited dansel gouged out one of his
eyes with a parasol. She knew the hug
of bear too bruinous to the health.
When a man wants to hug an Idaho
girl with any safety he uses pair of ice
tOngs. darlington EaUkeYe.
When you see young man sitting
beside much ''banged' or frizzled
young lady in railroad Car, or a thea
ter, and his arm sort of instinctively
crawls around the top of her seat in
close proximity oher dollar-stOre neck
lace AMI back hair, you may feel as
sured that be is not her brother. And
the chances are less than one in a hun
bred that they are married.
Transcript.
The first drink makes man feel
anxious for the second; the second
brings a smile to his face; the third has
a voIuble effect; the fourth. he is still
more sociable; the fifth produces dig
nifty; the sixth a stern expression Of
conntenance that means beware; tho
seventh, he becomes pugilistic; tho
eighth, he fights and gets thrashed, and
AN subsequent drinks have no effect bit
to delay the hour of sobriety.-Ncw
HaUem Register.
-" What's de news bout de Presi-
dent, Uncle MoseP' ..De las bullet
ing say dat his pulse was 90. teplpera-
ture norval, and perspiration %, an he
was AKIN fur a beef,teak." :'Thank
de Lawd. dat's hopeful sign. Uncle
Nose, Ise always remarked when folks
git shot i'm de libcr de mos usually be-
gins to mend when dc persperation gifts
to 23, an de begins to take interest in
vittals. -Ieras StJti1gs.
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
Ended ~ Last.

The long contest at Albany is etidtd
~ last and the country is to be congrat-
ulatcd, if not ipSn the result itself, at
least upon the fact that a rcsui; has
been reached. The deadlock had be-
come a dreary disgust TO the public,
and everybody is thankful it is over.
1t will be chiefly memorable because
Of the unclcan methods of New York
politics and bad morals of New York
-, politicians which it developed, and it
is TO be hoped that the lessen of the
revelation will not be wholly list npon
the constituencies that arc thus trifIed
| with and misrepresentcd.
The ele .tion of MIR. Lapham will be
memorable for the reason that it sealed
the Senatorial fate of Roscoe Conkling
which Mr.. Conkling himself had al
ready precipitated by his petulant and
ill-timcd resignation:
Nj. COnklinS, therefore, is rot to be
congratulated; neither is he the sort IF
person who needs or seeks commisera-
ton. He owes his present discontinue
TO his own folly. His fall was in obedi-
ence to the resistless law of gravitation.
He leaped from the Capitol, and there
was no angel to bear him down unhurt.
In the Senate he was power for
good or evil-greater than any of his
colleagues. Out of the Senate, in the
way and under the circumstances that
he went out, even though the antagO-
hism between himself and tho Admins
tration had become itttdlerable: he was
shorn of his strength and was forced
into the very slums of Albany to rally
his henchmen to the rescue.
His resignation was complete dis
armament. His miscalculation of the
effects of his action was much more
than political blunder; it was d phe-
nomenon of intellectual obliquity, that
must have startled his subsequent re-
flectiOIis.
The outcome is what was to be ex-
pected. To the Administration Repub-
licans belong the victory, such as it is,
and the congratulations, such as they
are. The election of their candidates
ton of the prerogatives of the Execu-
tive against partisan dictation. though
in the rough andtumble of the late
struggle, the real issue the great
principle at stake-was more or less
lost sight of, as the contest degenerated
into a merely sordid scramble for the
spoils.
AS to the Democratic members of the
Legislature, they have borne themselves
throughout with a sense Of dignity and
4 steadfastncss to principle that not
only command the respect of the whole
people, but will add largely to the
prestige and power of the party in New
York
Out of the smoke of the b;ttle the
emerge divided and de-
The .defeat of one faction |
is the triumph of another, it is true, but |
n household divided against itself can
not stand. The Democracy. upon the
other hand, were never more firmly |
united. 1t is the Democracy, indeed,
who are most of all to be congratulated.
. WaShingto7s Post.
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20

was not more clearly sacrificed 10 Tho
slave system than President Garfield to
the "spoils SYSTEM" But for the
power and the practice of general re-
movals following 4 change I'M the per-
son of the President there would have
been nothing to set alire the weak brain
of Guteau with murderous hate of
President Garfield. The power to mako
such removals must be taken away by
law and by public opinion, and the
practice of making them must be
stopped. There is no more need of
such general removals and no more
sense in making them in the civil serv-
ice of the Republic than in the army or
navy or in the judicial departments.
The thing to be prevented is the max
ing of removals for party reasons. and
competitive Examinations before ap-
pointments must be tried lis tnsans of
checking wholesale removals! Let
good Democrats consider what was said
in Mr.. Tilden's platform, adopted in
St. Louis in 1876, on that head!-N. T.
HOrtI
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
RELIGIOUS AND EDUCATIONAL.

The venerable Prof. Packard has
attended sixty-two commenccments al
B"%doin College.
BY tie lsw eefisus there are in IRE
land 1881 1888 RoriiaH Catholics and
I, 1913; 442 Professionals OF all kinds
The Southern Baptist Board Of Mis-
sions has refused to send out two men
appointed f6r missionary service in Chi
ma, on the ground thn. they reject pie
nary inspiration.
The English Congregational Union
Is preparing for Il great jubilee, which it
PROPOSES to celebrate by raising a fund
to pay all theft church. debts and in
crease the salaries Of their ministers
In recent discourse, tic Bishop of
Manchester said that, when he was In
this country, the greatest defect he
noticed in the schools was an attempt
to teach tod tItusb, and teaching it i'm
perfectly.
The death is announced from Paris
of Horace Monod. He was for forty five
years pastor of the Reformed Church
and Honorary Chairman of the Mar
settles Protestant Consistory. He was
a member Of the venerated Monod
family, which has ifieladed several
aminent evangelical ministers.
Eight YEARS win measure the actual
time of missionary wors in. Japan, yet
there are now in that Empire 100 mis-
sionaries, so organized churches, with
5000 memberships. Christian commu-
nifty of 5000, schools. dispcnsaries,
colleges, thousands of religious works,
translations of Scripture, and the elf
tulaton O. a Christian newspaper in all
parts of tie Empire. The Bible has
been admitted into the higher schools,
and a Christian calendar has been
adopted.
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
Condensed TELEGRAMs.

THE Cattle Commissioners selected
by the Secretary Of the Treasury have decid-
cd to make q searching investigation at the
chief Western centers TO make sure that the
live stock at those points is free from infec-
| ton.
MAKING JAREz, the Minister from
Nicaragua to the United States, died Of
apoplexy at Washington.
THOMAS A. CRANDALL, prominent
Colorado stock dealer, fell from the top of q
cattle train at st. Joseph, No., on the 18th,
and was run over and killed.
THE Southern Pacific Railroad is now
being laid at the rate of one mile per day be-
yond Ell Paso, and President Crockcr pre-
diets that the line will, by July next, be fin
ished to Galveston. He says engineers are
now running a survey from Corinne to
Yankton, and n road can be built for one
third the cost Of the Union Pacific, which
will be done il Gould consoldates the Atch-
isOn, Texas Pacific and Union Pacific lines.
gone to Europe.
AN express train on the Grand Trunk
Railway was thrown from the track near
Prescott, Ont. on the 18th, caused by the
locomotive striking cow. The locomotive
and tender and express-car were overturned
and completely demolished, and four passen-
ger coaches were derailed. The engineer
stuck to his locomotive and met a most hor-
rible death. The fireman was pitched off by
the conclusion and badly injured. Two ex-
press messengers and a baggagemaster were
buried beneath the debris of their car and
rescued i'm an almost dying condition. Nine
passengers were injured, six Of them seri-
ously.
AN emigrant train ran into a wash
out near Las Vegas, N. NJ, on the night of
the 18th, killing engineer Townsend and fire.
man Patton.
+. M. MARKS, of Rome, Ga, and C.
NJ. CresweIl, of MebancsvilIc, N. c., stud
ents at Enstman's College, Poughkeepsie,
N. Y, while boating on the Hudson River
were run down by steamer and both were
drowned.
BY the sudden falling of an old build
ing in one Of the most frequented quarters
of Vienna, on the 18th, twenty persons were
killed and thirty injured.
CHARLES BoYNTON, q mill hand Mt
Portland, Me-, attempted to kill his wife,
who had left him and gone TO her mothers
at Bar Mills. He fired at her with a revolver
but missed, and she saved her life by jump
ing from a second story window. His wifc's
sister, Mrs. Waterhouse, then entered the
room, when he fired two shots at her, one OF
which entered her breast inficting prob
ably fatal wound. Boynton then shot him
self through the pit Of the stomach, expir-
ing instantly.
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
A Cats Nine Lives.

But that amt nothin' ter the story
| once heerd bout cats. There was a
widder Twin down on Parliament street
that had cat. yaller cat. that were
everlastin' meowin. Every mornin'
that cat would sit on the doorstep an
meow, an meow, ELL the hull neighbor-
hood had gone through the new trans
lation over an over agin. Finally the
old wilder began ter fall from grace
herself, an as Ter her son Bill he had
sinned beyond redemption more onct.
So the old widdcr sez. Bill, sez she,
take that thecr cussed varmint an
drown it. Bill he was glad of the
chance, an he takes an pitches that
cat in the Don. Next morning theer
was that cat siItin' on the doorstep an
mcowin' as bad as ever. Bill he takes
her agin, an tied n heavy stone ter her
neck. an throwcd the hull business in
ter the Don. Next mornin' theer was
that cat on the doorstep, an meowin'
like mad. Then Bill he got mad, an
he mp an chopped her head oil. an
threw both head an body inter the
Don. Next mornin', ! hope l may
scream. if there d dn't sit that cat on
che doorstep, with its head in its mouth.
an howlin' like all possessed. Toronto
Ercntng Nous,
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
FACTS AND FIGURES.

One person out of every 2i6,G22 is
yearly struck by lightning.
Fifteen thousand California trout
are to be put in the Niagara River above
the falls.
Last year in France there was only
one person in 100000 killed by rail-
road accidents.
There are 1000 acres of flax within
fifteen miles of Santa barbara, Cal. A
fine yield is certain.
Tho American honey trade with
Great Britain is growing rapidly. A
recent English order calls for $1,000
pound cans.
"A larger proportion of white low
ers are fragrant than those Of any other
Solof. Yellow comes next, then red.
and lastly blae; after which, and in tho
same order, fftay be reckoned violet,
green, orange, brown and black.
AN invention for easing the strain
OH Horses in starting horse-cars has
beef in six months successful service
in Boston. A little pedst touched by
the drivers foot puts the device into
operation. 1t connects the tongue OF
She car with lever, which operates q
latchet, taking hold of n coSwheel on
the axle, thus easing the dead pull
nearly One-half
Official returns show how vast arr
Che fiocks of sheep owned in the Aus
trHlian colonies: The New Zealand and
Austfslian Land Company owns 3d.
900 sheep; MIR. Robert Campbell, 1885,
900; Mr.. George Henry Moore. $4,000;
Messrs. Dalgelty Il Co., 208, 900; Sir
Dillon Bal, 5000; the Hon. William
Robinson. 6ssgO6, Sir Gracroft Wilson.
10000; Mr.. Kitchen, 10000, and Mr..
Allan Mclean. $4,000.
--GGrf.tany has nearly 400, 900 shoe
makers and c0bblefJ, or nearly 90 to
every 10000 OF her population. This
is larger proportion than in any coun-
try except Italy and England. Italy
takes the lead of all. Then come, in the
order named, England and Wales. Ger
mafIy, Belgium, Ireland, Denmark,
France, the United States and Sweden.
II is curious circumstance that warm
Italy should have within fraction OF
100 cobblers to 5000 of the population,
and cold Sweden less than 1S
DIR. Calling, of Hartford, Conn,
the inventor Of the Calling gun, has
produced gun that is said to be the
best one yet. 1t will be mounted on the
gunwale OF ship with apparatus for
sweeping three-fourths Of the horizon,
and the range is three miles at least.
1t has a rified steel barrel sol inches
long, with caliber of 1.45 inch, and
throws solid shot weighing l | pounds
and steel-pointed, capable Of piercing
the iron casing of a torpedo boat three
miles away. 1t is a breoch-loader. and
is fed BY hand, but the loading and
firing is autdrnatic. Two men can
manage it, 1t is called the Calling tors
pedO gun.
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
POLITICAL POINTS.

The Democrats have no reason t6
complain if the Republicans like the fur
of killing off their great men. There
is no shame in the confession that Mr..
COnkling is very large stumbling
block taken out of the Democratic path
way.
An independent contemporary
says: "Thc Republican party is moi
dead yet" No, it is not. But it is OH
its last legs; both legs are going in OPP
pOsite directions, and the strain will
prove too much for the rest of the BODY
.Indiana State Sentinel
The Republican idea of an I" era
of good feeling is different from the
Democratic. To the Republican breth-
rem it means merely that the - Stall
warts" and '.Half Breeds" shall shake
hands across the public crib and be
happy again. We shall wait to hear
President Garlield's definition of it be-
fore entering on the Democratic idea.
Washington Post.
When Mrs. Garfield had finished
reading newspaper account of the first
days excitement and the state of public
feeling, the President, stretching out
his hand and placing it in hers, ex-
claimed: ITS q people worth dying
for. isn't it?" Aye, Mr.. President, and
its q people worth living for and giving
them u pure, reformed, and National
administration. Detroit Free Press.
The experience of the last twelve
month should warm our esteemed Re-
publican contemporaries never, never,
under any circumstances however CEN
surable, to find fault with and abuse
any Republican whatever. There is no
knowing when they may have to sup
port him with the widest enthusiasm
for President or Senator or something.
Detroit Tree Press.
Mr.. John Sherman must have felt
a trifle small when the dispatches in
him that Secretary Window had
restored to the Commissioner of Inter-
nal Revenue the control of nominations
to positions in his department.. Sherman
took that power away from Commits
sioner Raum. because the latter was
Grant man before the Chicago Conven-
ton and refused to aid his (Sherman's)
political schemes. The whirligig of
time is unerring in its revolutions, and
always brings its cOmpensations.
Post.
dawes. of Massachusetts, whose
great heart was passionately stirred by
III hHitSSiHdry ta'e Oh in outrage OH an
Did man at an unspecilied place in the
south, has not been heard from in rep
of the beating, stripping, tar
ing and feathering of a helpless woman |
II his very doors by II mob of citizens |
If Massachusetts. Now, however, that |
We have directed his attention to it, we
eel confident that before shutdown he |
will below for revenge like the croak-
ny raven and urge the moving of
roops into the Berkshire Hills, there
o be retained until the inhabitants for
AXE these practices characteristic of
Massachusetts, civilization. - N. J.
POftd
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
The Trouble Caused by n Burglar.

| Last week Mr. Robert Sweat, of Warren
on his way home from Bowling Green,
| ,topped at the house Of his brother-in-la law,
Mr.. Robert Holland, in the neiGhborhood
of IIadlcy, 10 stay all night. About the
| usual time the household retired, and Mr..
| Sweat was put in bed room adjoining and
| opening into the one occupied by Mr.. Hol-
| land and his wife.
Sometime in the night Mrs. Holland
heard a noise in the room in which she and
her husband were sleeping, and, on awaken
ing, saw man standing near the foot OF
their bed. She quietly aroused her hus-
band, and he, jumping out OF bed, literally
alfghted upon the back Of the intruder ard
rode him out OF the foom. The burglar
opened the wrong door, and, instead of
getting out Of the house, got into Mr..
Sweau's room. That gentleman, in the
meantime, was sleeping soundly, and duti-
fully dreaming Of home and his mother
Starting up about half awake, and seeing
The two figures enter his room, he imagined
that the burglar was his mother and that
Holland was somebody trying to kill her.
Quick rs Thought, and without a word, he
went for the supposed assassin and planted
blow on the side of his head that
brought him to the floor half stunned,
and before he was able to get up,
Sweat was " onto him like thousand
Of brick" and using him up at fearful
rate. The astonshed burglar took adyant-
age OF the situation and escaped through the
window. After flooring Holland, Sweat
thought his assassin was safe, and turned
his attention to his mother. just in time to
see her jump out of the window. He ran to
the window and was just getting out lrim-
self, when Holland, recovering, saw his
burglar, as he thought, about to get away.
and, rushing TO the window, he seized him
by the back of the neck and pulled him back
into the room. Then the two men began
again life and death struggle. This TINS
Holland got the best OF II, and had just
about closed the jugular vein of his brother
in law. when third person appeared on
the scene. This was young man who lived
with Holland, and rs he entered and spoke,
ii Hind said to MIN: swell, I've saved one
Of them Hearing Hollands voice, Sweat
feebly gasped: els that you, Bob?" IIol-
land, in amazemenr, released his hold on
Sweatt's neck, and exclaimed, in dismay:
as that yon, Bob?" They both answered
"Ye.," and the fight ended. BY this time
the whole house was aroused, and lights
being brought the brothers law were
found in an exhausted condition and badly
used up. Looking at the matter after 1t Is
all over, it is rather amusing, but the actual
experience was anything else RusseYeiMs
Ky Hcraid- Enterprise
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20
CRIMES AND CASUALTIES.

GEORGE LEONARD SMITH, of Buffalo,
N. Y, while in a semi inebriated condition,
seized with both hands one of the brushes
connected with the generator in the Brush
Electric Light Company's works in that city.
An attendant, realizing the mans danger,
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20

The swindlers go to n wcll-to- do farmer
and tell him he has been recommended as n
good man to sell their machines, and ask
him to become their agent. lie is persuade
ed that They sell rapid y, and that he can
make a large per cent. profit. He is told
that he will not be expected to risk any
money or pay anything until he has sold
$:,2J worth of the machines. He is induced
to sign the contract above given, which, it
will be seen, sets forth this agreement when
read straight across. 1t looks fair and inno-
cent enough, and soon the farmer puts his
name in the blank space Just before tie
words "SOle Agent for --- Company -
Afterwards the scamps easily change the
document from contract to sell into q
promissory note by tearing off that part to
the right of the line drawn through the
agreement as printed. In the original pre-
scented to the farmers OF course no line ap-
pears; and it Is given here simply to show
where the division takes place, and the sep
aration ut which point so radically changes
the nature of the document. 1t will be
seen at glance that this Is liable to de-
ceiye any one without close inspection, and
number OF Indiana farmers have been
cheated with them this summer. The last
beard Of the gang they were operating ex-
tensively in bartholomew County. After
the farmers notes get into the hands OF
"innocen purchasers' there is no recourse
but to pay them off, as they cannot well go
back OH the signaturcs.-Ltdi O.apolis Cor.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20

1t is proposed in New Hampshire
TO celebrate the one hundredth ami
vcrsary of Daniel Wcbsters birth, which
falls on the 18th of January next
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20

When the Emperor of China travels
in public one hundred men dressed lust
like him travel with him. so his identity
cannot be discovered. This is embar-
RAISING for would-be assassins,
American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1881-08-20

The congregation of the Presbyterian
Church at Fourteenth Street and Second
Avenue, New York, were cognizant of very
offensive odOr on last Sunday, and upon
making an investigation at the close Of the
service the dead and partially decomposed
body OF the sexton, J. B. Osborne, was found
In small apartment connected with the lee
ture-rOOm. The doors and windows of the
apartment were fastened on the inside, and
the gas was escaping freely from an open
burner. 1t was believed to be a case of sui
eide. The sexton had been missing since the
preceding Wednesday evening, when service
was last held in the church.
DIR. TANNER has located at Erie. Pa
He now proposes to fast three mouths, IL
fed on electricity. the air in his room to be
charged with heavy current. This being
positive, he can obtain a negative element
from the disintegration of his tissue. He ia
now fatfening for the fast, as plenty of adj
pose is necessary.
A TRAINING-sTABLE on the race
course near Lexington, KY, containing six
teen valuable horses, burned the other
morning. Bowers Carrie Hanson and
Eagles gray colt Knox were burned to death
and the others were greatly injured by dash
ing madly around the course.
WILLIAM GALE, the English pedes-
trian, has completed in New York his phe-
nomenaI feat Of covering 5000 quarter miles
in 5000 consecutive ten minutes, and con-
tipued on the track until he had added four