The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1881-09-01
VARIETY.

The business of telegraph COM
pany is s'spread from pole to pole"
So is that of the washer woman.
Surf bathing this season is a good
deal like tumbling about in snow
bank without over-shoes or ulster.
One of the Hartfort insurance COM
panies paid about 800, 900 for postage
last year.
Salt sprinkled on wheat, at the rate
of half barrel per acre. is said to ex-
terminate or drive off chinch bugs.
'.Oleomargarine needs no Defense"
as the hotel man said. t.No, it is strong
enough to defend ITSELF" answered
boarder."
At a prize-show of parrots in New
York. recently, it was noticed that the
most profane bird got the first prize.
New York taste is peculiar.
Those who have tried it confess that
a large, healthy mustard plaster worn
at the back contains more he at than
heavy overcoat.
If you want to take gimp out of
stuck-up man, mistake him for the
street-car conductor by offering him
your fare as he comes along.
Young clergyman Cat clerical meet
ing): 81 merely throw out the idea"
Old clergyman well, think that is
the best thing you can do with it. ;"
..And SO you learn dancing, Bob!
And how do you like valsing?' ''Oh,
it's not badi 1 can manage very well
myself, but think girls rather in
the way.
s.lf punish you," said mother to
her naughty little girl, edo you think
it will be for my pleasure?" For whose
pleasure is it, then? 1t isn't for mine,"
returned the child.
Ii you grasp a rattlesnake firmly
about the neck he cannot hurt you.
says a Western paper To be perfectly
safe it would do well to let the hired
man do the grasping.
Sleeping. dining and cooking cars
for its workmen have been introduced
by the Buffalo, Pittsburgh and Western
Company. Only $14 month is charged
for board and lodging.
Some must sow for others 10 reap.
and some will lay up umbrellas for
rainy day, but when the rainy day comes
the umbrellas will be borrowed.
Rich German-Americans have built
many beautiful villas along the Rhine.
The original of Auerbach's villa on the
Rhine was built by a German-Ameri-
can.
1t is reported that wild birds of near
ly 15O species visit the New York Cen
trail Park annually. Some species have
disappeared since the advent of the
English sparrows.
A monument to the memory of the
Union dead of Michigan has just been
completed in Detroit by the addition of
four statues representing History
Emancipation, Victory and Union.
A man who stopped at the Barnet
House n few days ago registered as
Bialmer Tjdaden Hjolgersen. Have we
another sweet singer of Norway among
us? Heaven forbid. = burlington
Hasckeye.
Amateur artist, painting bunch of
apple le-blossoms. to small boy looking
on: ..Well, Tommy, do you know
what they are?" Smah boy, with alb
solute certainty in his tones: ''Ycs,
marm; hens"
ssHalloar' With this exclamation the
hunter came to an abrupt halt. Crhe
concluding chapter of the thrilling and
absorbingly interesting story of 1.-The
Scout and the Indian will be found in
our waste-basket-)
Some of the largest mirrors ever
manufactured were recently made for
the Grand Opera House at Paris. They
measured forty-five by .ffty-two feet,
their weight being from l, 200 to 1,600
pounds each.
Preachers and editors may get half
fare rates and complimentaries on rail-
roads and to shows ON earth, but in the
approaching hereafter there is no evi-
dence that they will enjoy any greater
privileges than common people.
DIR. x who has been in the habit of
visiting Mime. A. three times a week as
medical adviser, was rather taken
aback the other day by the servant who
answered the bell, saying: ''Mme. A
will be unable to see you to-day, doc
tor. because she is SICK
II think" said an old topper, COM
upon the habits of a young
man, who was fast making a beast of
'.when man reaches GER
tain pint in drinkin', he ort to STOP"
..Wcll, / think" said old Beeswax,
dryly. ''he ought to stop before he reach
es pint"
"My wife won't even hear of my
going to the theatre with another lady,"
said Gallagher. Ragbag didn't seem
to construe Gallagher's remarks Alright.
for he said: won't, eh? Don't you be
too sure of it! 1 thought my wife
WUuiuu u, DuL sic anu u lcstI-
full time of ii"
A new tomb at Cullingsville, VT,
is a copy of an Athenian temple, and |
cost Sz5.0O0. Within a door of bronze
and an inner one of granite are the |
graves, and marble statues of the dead |
are then placed in such a manner that |
mirrors, by rejecting them, give the |
effect of a long vista of art galleries.
Cremation is no longer popular, l
see," remarked Job Shuttle, this morn
ing. ..Well. sh'd hope not; it's bad
enough to think of your soul burning
up. let alone the body" ''Mrs. Shuttle, |
wish u-wouldn't accent the word
your. and look ut me so sharply"
And the meal was finished in silence.
A colored youth sauntered into the
Office at Waynesboro, Ga,
bis object being to procure a marriage
license Upon being interviewed in
regard to the are of the bride elect, he
said she was about 40 years old. and
,lsO gave a reason for his preference
ior n blushing damsel so much older
han himself that she had four or five
children who were able TO work
1t is a well-known fact, says the
Seieafiic american, that any person
If average structure and lung capacity
will foat securely in water if care is
AIKEN to keep the hands and arms SUBJ
merged and the lungs full of air. Yet
n most cases people who are not
winners Immediately raise their
lands above their head and scream the
moment they find themselves in deep
vater. The folly of such action can be
illustrated by means of q
Ialf empty bottle and n couple of nails.
nd the experiment should be repeated
n every household until all the men,
the women and
that the only chance
or safety in deep water lies in keeping
he hands under and the mouth shut.
DIR. Calling of Hartford, the inventor
( the Gatling gun. has produced u gun
hat is said to be the best one yet. 1t
ill be mounted on the gun-wale of q
hip with apparatus for sweeping three
,urths of the horizon, and the range is