davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

AT a meeting Of the woburn Con.
ference Farmer Alien, Of Wakefield, re-
lated the following anecdotes On sun
day morning, while q certain deacon
was preparing for church, y wandering
wayiarer, OF, In modern p~arlance, q
tramp, appeared ut his door, pleaded
his hunger. and begged Tor something
10 eat. The deacon looked solemn and
frowningly, bHt Feluctantly got a loaf OF
bread aud began to cut it; but while
doing 80 took occasion TO admonish the
heggar concerning the erroro of his ways.
After reminding him that IL was the holy
Sabbath which he vas Decorating, he
asked him If he knew how 10 pray.
= No, was the reply. "1hen,' said
the deacon, "Ill leach YOU, and he
commenced to repeat the Lords Pray
or. But just as he uttered the first
words, " Our Father the beggar in
terruptod him with the question,
what, Is he your father aud mine,
Yes" the deacon replied.
"Why," exclaimed the beggar, "we
are brothers, then, amt weP Can't you
cut that slice a little thiekorP"
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

"A meeting of about 100 persons
claiming TO be heirs of the Anneke JAMS.
Webber estate in Holland has been held
in D%otroit, Mich. A great deal Of rugged
e~loquence was expended, and j. II.
Fonda. Of Detroit, was selected 70 visit
New York in July as repre-; ehtative Of
the claimants. A temporary gloom was
cast over the meeting by the statement
OF one OF the gentlemen present that he
had written to the Hon. james G. Bir-
ney, United States Minister to The
Hague, soliciting information, and that
Mr.. Birney had responded promptly
that the whole litigation was a Wild goose
chase.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

The South African Beers do not seem
to have much respect for their suzerain,
Queen Victoria. IL is not going o far
to say they utterly ignore il. They pub
fish az Poichefstroom a paper called the
South african Republtc Gazette, which
contains, among other items, a notice OF
eaststIu plsUlie documents issued from
Government House, Heidelberg and
signed edward Box, State Secretary
Judging from this, though the fiction Of
an imperial authority Is still kept up,
there exists a de Jacto South American
republic, with It's seat OF government,
It's official Gazette, and its ordinances
pupliShad therein. Sir Evelyn Wood
Is perfectly aware Of all this, as Is the
whole commission, but has taken no
steps 10 assert the authority claimed BIZ
the Queen. In this he acts wisely,
though the wiser course would be for
the English Government frankly to ac-
cept the situation, 10 retire from the
Transvaal, and TO acknowledge, as ii
must in the end, the complete independ-
ence of the Beers.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

referring to the incident afterward
in q letter to friend, the mAidcn wrote
"lf George were boiled for q thousand.
years IN the hot springs Of Iceland |
don't believe he'd ever smell sweet
again" George and she we're Walking
in the lane in the moonlight, and George
saw q pretty spotted creature which he
mistook for o cat, and which he at-
tempted to catch and present TO the
maiden
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07
Chicago ull.l Western Catholic.l
The Fau,nvtn H.ae E-t.ud

We are mot ~belisvsrsin eyery trash that is
called medicine, and have, on many oeca-
sions, warned our readers 10 beware Of the
stuff; but there Is an article which has been
before the public for 3 long time, aud which
has been Endorsed by the most eminent men
in the land, including many OF our most re-
spected and learned bishops and prissts.
We refer TO the world-renowned st. Jacobs
OIL. We have known = great many people
who were suffering from that terrible dis
ease called rheumatism, and who believed
their eases hopeless, they having tried al
most everything. We recommended st.Jacobs
OIL, the cures were almost miraculous, aud
now these good people remember US In their
prayers, and are never without 81. Jacobs
Oh In their houses. The OIL IL possssse d Of
q great deal Of merit, and we heartily recon-
mend II 70 our readers.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07
so mars The Grand Jury. 4 n,

!" so THAT's the Grand Jury, Is it;p
asked the man from the suburbs, after
scanning the forms and features Of the
twenty four individuals in the bOx-one
man with unkelnpt sandy locks, aB0thpF
with an aroma Of s~santimental seediliess
broodiug over bin, q third with a look OF
benign yacuity irradiating his conntenanee.
aud the others indicating different s,ages az
wretehedness and misery. s'Well, Sir, II
you've Rotany common, eyery-duy iurythen
around o here,L guess 4 don't cure 10
look at them. P--Bosto1l Ifd1BcriDL.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

Mr.. PRIM went fishing. and ON his return
told some terrific lies about what he caught.
Said sharp TO him FfNhat 40 YOU want 10
tell such yarns as that fort Tell something
possible, II not probable. Don't YOU know
that everybody saw that you were l~ylngf'i
les' answered Prim Then, what the
them 70 know ! was lying. / didn't want
them TO think l WAS eccentric. "-Bostoa
Post.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

1T always produces a queer kind OF sensa-
ton 10 meet 4 lady relative or friend after
an absence OF ten or fifteen years. You look
~ herana mink dear, dear, whata change
grown 10 be. And she Looks al you and
thinks; "Nell, well, and this podgy, baId-
headed old rooster IA all that Is loft OF NV
handsome jim, Dick, Bill or whatever yoiir
hideous name may ben Then you both ex-
claim with one breath: "Why, how well
You 70 iookingi not a day older" What
OsrtScr,
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07
M.nnra Wemcn.

Refined and educated women VIII some-
times suffer Ia silence for years from kidney
disease, or constipation and piles, which
could easily be cured by = package OF kid
Druggists sell both dry and
liquid.-Homs Journal.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

THAT milk Is pretty blue, land,
lord" Don't understand il. air; NV
COW Is well fed, / milk her m, self, and
! don't put water IN the milk" "lYell,
.theweather has been quite wet, and
reckon the COW needs shinglingi that's
aboutit. n-AEstiH syliags.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

REppTSG's RUSSIA sALvE meets with Won
derful SUGGEST in all cases OF skin diseases.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

BALDHEADED men win be sorry 10 hear
that the crop OF hair will be cut short owing
20 warm weather.%DefinT ma T1fN.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

No NAN Is wholly bad. There Is the forger,
Tor instance. lie Is ever ready to write 4
wrong.-Boeois Transcript 4
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

The English papers are lamenting
that old hamlets and towns are passing
out OF existence. and the people rapidly
emigrating TO the great eenters OF in.
dustry the cities.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

II AFFLICTED With Sore Eyes, use Dr. fsaac
Thompaon'a Eye Water. Druggists sell Il. 25c.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

THE little knots OF hair on the head OF 4
Chinaman are curly queues. - Philadelphia
Chronicle Herald.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

The close confinement Of all factory work
gives the operatives pallid faces, poor appe-
lite, languid, MISUNDERSTANDING ~pooEblOods
Inactive liver, kidney and urinary troubles,
aud ali the physicians and medicine IN the
world cannot help them unless they get out
OF doors or use Hop Bitters, the purest and
best remedy, especially for such eases, hay-
Ing abundance Of health, sunshine and rosy
cheeks I'm them. They cost but a tSihe. See
another coluimn.-ChnsliaA Recorder.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

Flies and Mosquitoes.
l5c box Rough on Rats" keeps . house free
from Gies, ~bed.bugs, reaches, rats. mice, sc.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

~ "the proof Of the pudding ia in the eat
ing where shall we look for the proof OF q
printers pif-EAaadaphia BaaleiGs.
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

WHEN a Boston man walks instead OF rid
Ing fn the street ears. The 0lebs credits bin
with saving; "a fare saved Is a beer
QaiuaHN
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

LadyAganss esss .sss,s g Z / ss%g,sy99ss@.
skift ane stoekfaG kupporfsrs,a Supple oaQI
ffe~ Address Qaeen CITY s~uapenser cs,,cin.u
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07

AInand Wsqs aentn. d. anywhera wholeasis
n Aandk elaiL Ricoiiat nee Goods guaran-
AtSNtAateed hosraKu1- 1871 WabashAy -dhieaEo
Osage Valley banner. (Tuscumbia, Miller County, Mo.) 1879-1881, 1881-07-07
npUNKEENEss OPIUM SssshsJJ
s.os IFSs iasl = N kEFlE3aa sok , s sss.

kEeHTS Coin monpy With DIR, chase's New
NNhut = Aceeipt HOOK. Newly geyiacd and en-
AIRED ~ mall AdaIsa Chase PuhE Co. Toledo o.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

ton of the political world during the
Russo Turkish war.
Does any American believe that, il
George Washington, Thomas Jefferson,
Andrew Johnson Or Henry Clay had
been in Maynard's place at that time
that they would not have raised their
voices for peace and wise solution of
the Eastern question upon the broad
principles of American polity, alike
equitable to the powers of Europe and
hororing to American craftsmanship p?
But where is the voice of Maynard :?
Echo answers, where?
The next we hear of him he is at
home in the Postoffice Department
with salary of $4,000, and then again
Immediately seeking seat in the U. S.
Senate. Greatness is not sought it
comes. If Maynard isgreat he belongs
to that class of statesmen who seek
greatness, and not to those who have
it thrust upon them for merit and pa
triotiSm.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
Three Questions.

Col. Alex X. Mcclure, on his recent
Southern tour of observation, reports
the following questions as propounded
by him and answered by Jeff Davis ::
/. Why was Beauregard ordered to
fire ON Fort Sumpter when it was inev-
liable that Anderson must surrender I?
Mr.. Davis answered promptly that
the order was given because the Lin
coin government broke its faith plighted,
in attempting to reinforce Fort Stump.
ter.
2. Col. McClure-Was the aggres-
sive movement of Lee at Gettysburg
prompted by military or political mo,
tivesf
Mr.. DIT was the wisest of both
military and political strategy. That
that entire campaign had General Lees
approval.
8. Col. McClure-Had Mr.. Davis
received any intimation from Mr.. Lin
coin, made in the Hampton Roads con-
ference that the United States would
pay the South slO0,O00,0O0 for the
slaves? CO
Mr.. d. had no such intimation
from any source, and if such propo-
sition had been made it could not have
been entertained by the Executive of
the Confederate government, since sla-
, very was State institution and could
only be dealt with by the separate and
independent States Of the Confederacy;
that some of the States would have ac-
cepted while others would have refused
the proposition. AS he was the sworn
Executive of the Confederacy he was
bound to respect the rights of the
States.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
THE INVESTIGATION
One Hundred Dollars to Five Hun
dred, the Price.

The Legislative committee appointed
to investigate the charges of bribery
and corruption made against certain
Democrats in the election OF
State officers, began their work last
week. Mr.. John j. Littleton, Jr.,
testified that he offered Mr.. Davis, OF
Putnam, 500 towards his reelection
to the Senate it did not offend him,
but he Davis said it was not enough,
that he could get $500 if he wanted to
sell out, that he might afford to vote a
few times for less, say about $3.50
that he was offered that amount, but
would prefer voting for Littleton's man
atthe same figure. A. j. McGlothir,
the main witness, who is said to have
seen the money plid over, disal pene !,
but returned and testified as follows
Mr.. A. j. McGlothin, the main wit.
ness, declined to answer the questions
as to whether he had any money tc
buy votes, and whether he promised
money to any one for votes. He stated
that he had learned that Representa-
tive Davis was for sale, and asked him
if he would vote for Shelley for 500.
After the election be asked Davis why
he did not vote for Shelley and he re.
piled that he got a better offer.
Other witnesses are being examined
but with no prospect of convicting any
one, although suspicion is greatly
strengthened that money was offered
and accepted for votes.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
A General Lock.

These are momentous times, and ON
nous of a grave future. As James
Buchanan said, when one after another
of the seeding States retired and
Joined the Confederate government,
Startling events occur with astonish.
ing rapidity," The year 1881, so much
dreaded as the finale of terrestrial af-
fairs, has been remarkable for dead
locks. Quite a number of State Legis.
latures have been locked in the election
of L. S. Senators, among them are In
diana, Pennsylvania and Tennessee.
The British Parliament hns been locked
on the Irish troubles; and now the
Nashville american wants to lock and
dam Cumberland river. Be sure not
to read an "n," either small or great,
at the end of the last executive word,
for we are sure the jolly boatmen have
done enough of that during the last
century to open free navigation on that
river if such means would accomplish
such a result.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
Is it a Year!

One year ago to-day we assumed the
editorial management of the STANDARD.
As that was on Saturday, 14th of Feb
ruary, and this is Saturday, the 18th,
il behooves us either 10 make up the
two days or show that they have been
made up. We prefer the latter and
here is the showing:
One of these two days was added to
February, 1880, to make it a leap year,
which is one day longer than COM
mon year. The length of common
year is $50 days, 5 hours, As minutes,
40 seconds, which lacks only II min
utes and II seconds of being 365f
days. The fraction one-fourth is only
counted every fourth year, when it
amounts to a day. In this way we adj
ded day to February, 1880, for this
fraction during the four years ending
Herewith. This accounts for one Of
the days.
The other was put in as follows: 1t
takes 366 revolutions of the earth on
its axis to make 365 days, which is a
loss of day each year and causes
Christmas to come this year on Sunday
instead of Saturday as last year. The
explanation is this : While the earth is
making one revolution on its axis, 1t
goes about one degree forward in its
orbit, which requires "a hours and 4
minutes to bring the same meridian
vertically under the sun, thus making
solar day "a hours and 4 minutes,
more exactly, "a hours, 3 minutes, 56
seconds. But for convenience astrono-
mers have agreed to call the solar day
"a hours, and the sidereal day % hours,
Sc minutes, 4 seconds.
The difference in the solar day and
the sidereal day is 3 minutes 56 seconds,
the solar day being the exact interval
between two successive passages OF the
same meridian under the sun, while
the sidereal day is the exact time of
one revolution of the earth on its axis I;
and as we count by the solar day we
lose the 3 minutes and Sc seconds every
day, and in 365 days we lose one day,
This accounts for the other missing
day. Now, if our readers complain
that at the end of thisyea of 81 weeks
two days have come up missing, as it
really appears, we answer the com
plafhants that we, too, have lost three
square meals and one nights sleep
Let us beware lest our days on earth
be cut short in like manner.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
BUSINESS.

The STANDARD is not r,a in the in
tsrest Of any one man, Or set Of men. but
IN tbs interest of all classes of people, and
not for nor against any class. u advocates
progress and improvement IN every branch
Of industry and every pursuit and calling.
The subscription price is 81 gear a,
advance. We cannot publish Il on credit.
S@r AHpersOns indebted to Ibis office for
Subscription or job cork are requested to
settle the same at once. "Low Prices and
Cash Payments" is our motto.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
Extensive Coal Field.

A few miles above the head of navi.
cation on the Black Warrior, and abou
two miles west Of the city of Birming-
ham, Ala, there is said to be a coal
field of 5000 square miles with an av-
erage thickness of five feet veins. 1t
lies on both sides of that river, which
is the bottom of the coal basin and
makes mining easily carried on without
shafting. The coal is of the finest va.
rieties of bituminous, semi-bituminous
and cahnel coal. Red Mountain, which
is solid mountain of iron ore forty
miles long, approaches within half a
mile of Birmin5ham.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

The Gallatin Tennessean, low tax,
in speaking of the defeat of D. l..
Snodgrass for Secretary, says;
He would have been elected had
it not been for the political crime of
Henry P. Davis and one or two other
low tax Democrats.
The Tennessean, in the same issue,
pslliates the "political crime" of Geo.
Fl. Morgan, the Speaker of the Sen
ate, on personal grounds. No personal
considerations can make this difference.
If Davis and Others are guilty of a po-
litical crime, Morgan is doubly so, for
he was the bell-weather that made the
break and led the way.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

Hurrah for Ohio and West Tennes-
see! Ohio has a couple of Presidents
on her hands, with any amount of Su-
preme Judges and inferior Uuited
States officers. West Tennessee only
has tao United States Senators, one
Governor, one Secretary Of State, and
one Treasurer, and the reason she don't
have more is that the State Constitution
don't allow it. We expect to be in
West Tennessee by the time of the
next biennial distribution.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

This little place we used to call the
"Western District" is looming up of
late. 1t is now called the Western
Division of the State. Very soon it
will be called the State of Tennessee.
We don't blame East Tennessee for
wanting to set up for heIself, for Mid
die Tennessee has already been S,uallo,c-
ed up.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

"Gen. Weaver, the Greenback can
didate for President, told a reporter the
other day that he thought a non,inter-
est bearing bond could easily be float
ed."-Chat. Times.
1t is light enough to float on very
shallow water. but would require Il
gold basis to precipitate it As a sinking
fund.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

The number of plants required for
an acre at any given distance apart,
may be ascertained by dividing the
number Of square feet in an acre (4S,-
500 by the number of square feet
given to each plant, which is obtained
by multiplying the distance between
rows and the distance between plants.
Strawberries planted three feet by one
foot, gives each plant three square feet,
or II, $40 plants to the acre. Barry.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
Maxwell Change.

Gen. Chas. Z. Smeades has retired
from the proprietorship of the Max,
well, and j. H. Fulton, formerly con-
nected Herewith, has succeeded to the
position of proprietor.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

Mr.. Rose rose rapidly to the U. S.
Senate, and fell as suddenly as frost
bitten rose. The Legislature concluded
that Senator by another name would
smell as sweet-especially one without
the Buchanan odor.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

A bill providing that teachers who
have taught five consecutive years shall
be passed without examination has
been passed by the Ohio Senate.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

The Knoxville Dispatch says it cad
mires Maynard's talents and his integ-
rity, too, but when that is said all is
said (; that he cares no more for Ten
nessee than he does for Nova Scotia. "
If the latter clause be true we would
like to know where the "integrity"
comes in?
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

The mysterious Malone, of Virginia,
says he intends to vote as he pleases.
That's all right provided he always
pleases to vote right.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

Onelbusbel of muck around young
vine or tree, in clayey soil, will give
better results than would be obtained
if man hoed or watered continually.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
Monday. March z. 1851,

Monday. March z. 1851,
the equity of redemption that the hers of
VIM. Smoot, Decd have in and to the fol
lowing two described tracts of land, tO.wit !:
One tract lying i'll the 18th civil district of
Warren county, Tenn, bounded on the north
by the lands of T. j. Hennegar, on the east
by James Cope, on the west by Thos. j.
Hennegar and on the south by Barren Fork
river. The other tract living in 10th civil
district of said county, bounded on the
north by the lands OF John Brewer, on the
east 10y the home tract of VIM. Smoot, decd
on the west by the lands of Isaac Ray and
Daniel Anderson and on the south by Elijah
Anderson. will also at the same time sell
tract-of land of one acre, more or less, w.
ing in the 10th civil district, bounded on the
north by the lands of A. j. Hunt, on the
east by Isaac Ramsey, col, on the west by
L. V. Patty.
Terms of sale;--0n credit of IL and is
months, except $S9l.S4, with interest from
goth of April, 1879 which will be required
in cash Oh the first described tract, and the
sum of S3SS.lS, with interest from 2Gth of
April 1879, on the other tract A plat of
said lands will he exhibited on day of sale.
This Feb, 5, 1881. J. c. BILES c. an.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12
chancery Sale.

Wm. H. SmoOt ct al, VS.. Isaac Smoot ct al.
TN obedience to a decree of the Chancery
Il Court at McNInnville, Tenn, rendered
in the above entitled cause / will sell at the
court house door in the town of McMinn-
vile on
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

BY you, vast amount Of fun and good
reading if you fail to subscribe for the
STANDARD Immediately. 81 a year.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

The STANDARD Office is the place to
get you hand-bills struck cheap.
Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1881-02-12

TOBPRINTING cone at the sTADARD OF.
y fee, on short notice.