The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1881-08-11
Qartetu.
VARIETY SCRAPS.

good example is perpetual preCept,
Handsome is whom handsome does.
The clock strikes but don't stop work,
The chief end Of minister The reverend
Flies are caught by molssses Men and women
by tafy.
When steamer isoverdue she ought to be pro
tected.
What is vinegar without mother 1t is or.
phan very poor.
A drunken wife bealer said it was trouble
drove him TO lick 'er
Where did the gas man meter?-Boston Times.
In the cellar Of course.
1t is better to hit the nail on the head twice
than 1t is to nit the nail on the finger once.
Snizzle says he wishes he was lie, because a
lie is always being branded"
Glass eyes are made so cleverly nowadays that
even the wearer can't see through the deception.
A lady friend (unmarried)- Where ignorance is
bliss, It's folly to be wives,
The drinking habit dates back to the time when
Cain gave Abel punch 9nd drew the claret
There being warm weather. it is about time to
discover that the ice crop was spoiled by the
frost.
Plump girls are said to be going out OF fashion
II this is true, the plumper the girl The simmer
her chances
my Darlings Shoes" is tie name OF a new bal.
lad, but the old mans boot is generally consider
ed more touching.
The fashion editor who goes raViDg in this
weather about black cashmere suits being in
style needs muzzin'.
when Greek meets Greek then comes -"
Not much They invite each other to drink,
same as Americans do.
American -four not only takes the cake In Eu
rope, but makes all the best ones, We've got the
old world in our hopper,
An Arkansas man had seven buCkshot taken
from his head and remarked that quite load
was taken off his mind.
1t is said that there is ring" among the bell
founders to send prices up twenty per cent We
tolPd you 1t would come,
The question which divides the House of Com.
mons just now is, Which shall we have, statute
law, common law or Bradlaughi
A Philadelphia man was fined 1927 in that city
for kissing a girl on the street. In Canton he'd
have to pay $500. We believe in making 'em pay
what thing is worth,
Th5 man said he couldn't hire the applicant.
Said the young man II can prove that am
perfectly honest" "Yee know, said the other,
"ThatS the trouble You see l am In the coal
business"
This slang does raise the very mischief When
a handsome young wife went to hardware store
to get one of those contrlvances to mash potatoes
and said II want masher," every man In the
shop from the boss to the office boy, started to
walt on her.
A few weeks ago the foundation stone was laid
OF huge embankment, across Welsh valley
which is to conhne waters destined to supply
Liverpool 67 miles distant, with 52,OOOOOO gallons
q day. The works are expected to take ten years.
Capt Edward Trelawney, the blographer Of
Shelley and Byron is still living, at the age Of
about ninety years, For forIy.six years he has
carried IN his body musket ball, which was
fred at him from behind entering between the
shoulders and lodging under the breast bone.
A detective has been killed at a secret meeting
Of Nihlllists at Kief He had been sent to the
meeting to watch the proceedings He was placed
on table, and his throat was cut Similar muir.
ders abound in the provinces, whittier the Nihi'
lists have transferred their activity from the cap
ital.
Dan slmson has drummed at sixty annual par
ades Of the Ancient and Honorable Artillery Of
Boston, and is 90 years old, He and 81 Smith, the
company's tifer, form the principal figures in the
popular painting Yankee Doodle" Several
ye rs ago Bostonian bequesthed his skin for q
drumhead on which simson should play every
Fourth Of July morning, but his patriotic idea has
not been realized,
couple eloped at Falling Springs West Vir'
ginia, and were holly pursued by the girls father
His horse threw him, breaking his leg, and the
suitor considerably bore him back home. This
caused diversion, giving the young man time
to prove that he was not gambler, as his skill al
cards ID led the father to believe, but belonged
to wealthy and respectable family. A peaceful
wedding ensued.