The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1881-06-28
FKESHEsT ale .NINGS.

Chpl. 6TOte says. MANY WOlilan uuetS
billiard chalk off her husbands coat, and u
big tear stands in her eye-ss she thinks how
late he works ,ights at his desk by the
whitewashed walls"
Are you going to the ba-Thousand
Islands this summer" said Mr.. s. to Miss
Unsophislicsted. MY goodness, mop said
she; I'VE couldn't think ct going to SO man,
ma says If we get to Long Branch, Newport
and Mattewan, we'll BIZ doing well.-Flskk!ll
Telephone.
| In railroad collision the other day a
young lsdy's old style bonnet was crushed
and dented IN seventeen different places. She
took 1t home, put u fl Dwer and two yards of
ribbon ON it, and now has bonntt of the
ialest style worth eleven dollars and half
I n vrrlstown Herald.
A DAnbury boo!black was in south Nor
walk when the train sent through there yeas
tetday on its way TO Hartford with the
nations military oi2Uitanes. did you see
Gen. ShermaL?' askel II ciLizen this morn.
in, while having Il shine. No was no
looking for met" was the RESPONSE. The
citizen was shocked. -Dsnbury News.
A lady writes: II have often noticed that
most Newspaper reporters are young men |
never hear them spoken of after the,
they become aged. The question that
troubles me is what becomes of them?
Some are In congress and several in the cab
jae!, but few men met with roveraos and
are editing New York and Chicago papers.
-Pniladelphia News.
| West Point officer: cadet, what is that
you have stuffed in your pocket, sir?' ca
uel: Tobacco, sir" Uthcel: Give it to
me. II rs against the orders of the post TO
chew tobacco, SIR" Officer turns hi, back
and cuts OFT chew, AID Ia king to himself :
THAT'S mighty good plug 20 man that
been out OF tobacco for three dsys."-New
Haven Register.
Few of the Thousands of people who
travel daily on the cars have any idea what
al ordinary passenger car Costs, and the
widest guesses are of.en heard, ranging from
$500 to % indefaite number Of THOUSANDS.
The average pr CO Of passenger Car Is about
"a 900; Pullman cars average from So 900
W $40 600; u locomotive spoils $ll ,OUO IL
Sl2 OU0. while an ordinary fire. GIT ur box
Car cvsls about 1925.
Definition Of deadlock: First class in poll
tie. Ttacher-"Mhst 10 n deadlock .
Pdpil-"lt is series Of votes that elect no.
body" "Correct. Where are desdl vcks
manufactured? "Iu Harrisburg w ash
iugton ana Albany" "Of what use are
deadlocks?" "rney turn statesmen inside
out, that the people NAV see what they are
made Of" "What are statesmen made of 90
Give il up."-New Haven K, gisler.
William Sprsgue, of Rhode Island has
spent fortune oi Sl2 000,0 left him by
his father, during the past twenty years. As
he didn't start daily paper to fill long
felt want, it is difficult ~ understand how he
spen. SO much money in that period. Ii ne
mpIoyed plumber three months year,
he ought still to have couple of thousand
left.-Norrlslown Herald.
"You mus. love Miss Lawrence yery
much" said Jack to MISS Da.hie rs they lett
that lady whom they bsd just met on the
street; you gavo her must rsp,urous klsl
ON the cherk," and Miss Dashie replied, III
despise heI!' "Then why such a ls.?
why, didn't you set? Sho was terrlU,y
painted, and made spot ON her cheek win
that kiss which will let every body VINO sees
her into the secret OF her elegan. conf plea.
ion" Women are queer creatures!-BJston
Post
The sweet "pretty soon:" The young
man who writes ~ like bulletin uoaru
will select the most agonlzingly delicate note
paper, with an elegant des'gn ia ,he corner,
aud indito thereon the unripe sentimental
ties Of his naturean forward by "stsr route"
to lis first and best girl. AT first -igh, of /,
she thinks il is bill of sale" 10. the hous,
he is connected with, but fods after close pc.
russl that Il is an ''invoice" for the house he
expects 70 establish in the sweet pretty soon.
New Haven Register.
A loving bride: A young man had jus,
been married. Ga tae evening of tho happy
day no observes hi. bride carefully restoring
hsr bouque. Of orange blossoms with in d
globe Of glass prepared for the purpose
Much surprised, no inquiries the reasos. Sh,
with a charming smile, replies: But, my
dear, may DO ab to keep il for next time.
| From the French