davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
The Evils Of Early Rising.

John Quincy Adams and Josiah
Quincy Adams, ST., were enthusiastic
advocates of early rising. They prac-
ticed it in boyhood, and attributed it to
their vigor in old age. Judge Story,
who was an intimate friend, loved dear
ly good morning nap, and their OPP
posite opinions often gave rise to sharp
and witty discussions. On one occa-
sion, when the two eminent men had
dined with the Judge, he invited them
to accompany him to the law school in
Cambridge, where he was to deliver a
lecture. He invited the ex-president
to talk TO the students, and Mr.. Adams
made interesting practical remarks.
touching, among other things, on his
favorite topic of early rising, Tho
Judge went on with his lecture. The
afternoon was hot and the lecture room
close, and toward the close of the lee
ture he noticed that the class were
nodding and smiling to each other.
Looking first on his right hand and
then on his left he discovered the Sc
cret eff their merriment, for both of the
distinguished visitors were asleep and
nodding. He could not resist the tempt
alton to add q postscript to his lecture.
young gentlemen, / call your atten-
ton to the visible proofs of the evils of
early rising" The loud laugh that
followed :tvoke the gentlemen, but
they did not understand the joke that
caused it.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Very 0nmfnrtahla.

An eccentric Philadelphian, fearful
that his special undertaken might not
serve him, had long before his death
ordered his coffin. Being very big
man, this precaution was necessary
The proper measurements were taken.
and the coffin made and stored. The
man died happy, and his friends at
once sent for the coffin. Strange to
state, it was too small. Either the bulk
of the party to be buried had increased
or the measurement had been improp-
erly taken. The great undertaken was
sent for. He hurried to the house. The
coffin was standing up against the wall
it was the first time he had ever been
at fault. The undertaken quietly got
into it and stood up in it. It was q
frame to picture. at is long enough"
he said, stretching himself out, ..and
wide enough"-he folded his arms
''and mighty comfortable, 1 assure
him. he concluded with sigh of in
effable atisfaction.-N. 7. San.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Two Brave T.ittla Girls.

A long time ago, in the Indian coun-
try, two little girls slipped away from
the fort and went down into q hollow
to pick berries. 1t was Emmy, q girl
of years, and Bessie, her sister, not
yet 6.
All at once the sun flashed on some
thing bright, and Emmy knew that the
pretty painted things she had seen
crawling among the bushes must be
hostile Indians, with cleaning weapons
in their hands. She did not cry out or
in any way let them know she had seen
them. But she looked all about. saw
that some of the creeping Indians al-
ready were between her and the Tort,
and went on picking berries as before.
Soon she called aloud to Bessie, with
a steady: Don't you think it, going to
ramp So they both turned and walked
toward the fort They reached the tai
grass, and suddenly Emmy dropped TO
the ground, pulling down Bessie, too.
what are you looking for?' asked
the little sister, in surprise,
Then Emmy whispered to Bessie. and
both of them stole silently and quickly
on hands and knees through the long
grass until they came to the road,
when they started up ran swiftly to tho
fort. dashed through the entrance. and
had the gate safely closed behind them.
The girls are quite old now, but they
remember very well tAe day they
saved themselves. the fort which their
father commanded, and the soldiers,
and the other people in il besijes, -
ST Nicholas. $500
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
"Outtinr a swathn Ia Journalism.


Young Fitzalamode has just entered
journalistic life, and is going to sscut q
swath'' He believes in putting in o
good deal of ''color'' in his items and
prides himself on the meliifuousness
of his work. He sharpened up
couple of pencils at both ends this
morning and began:
We regret to inform our readers that
the estimable Miss Jones, of Jones'
boro, daughter of Congressman Jones,
and granddaughter of the well known
founder of the Village of Jonesboro,
has met with a serious accident. As
she was driving along the boulevard,
at the speed of the wind, the horse, a
half brother of Maud S. and full sister
of St. Julien, became suddenly startled
by the uprising of a covey of cartridges
which are unusually numerous in that
section this season, and promise a great
deal of fun for the sportsmen when the
Law is off, and as they circled the
frightened steed tore down the avenue
like mad until stopped by the gallant
hand of Officer 70 of the Ninth Ward.
Her injuries were confusion of the
ankle which did not amount to a frac-
ture, and the unfortunate girl was car
ried home to her grief stricken parents
and sympathizing friends.
The city editor at this point was anx-
ious for copy" and glancing it over
rapidly crumpled it in his hand, re-
marking, Fifty, you have struck the
realm of fancy solid. This department
is the domain of fact.' He then
scribbled
THE daughter of Congressman Jones
was run away with by a spirited horse
IL
Injuries nominal. "-NeeO Hape,a Reg
ESTER
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Moffat's Life Pills,
and
pngllIx bIfters.

The Nest S uceessftti Medicines
in the World.
Established III 1885, by one of
our Nest Eminent PHYSICIANS.
aud now used throughout NCrt;i
and S0pth America, wish more
pleasing results than any other
Medicine.
MOiral's Life Pills
are purely vegetable; they act
on the Stomach and Liver, ard
regulate the entire system and
put all the functions OF the body
in q healthy condition, Q and
WARRANTED q certain cure for
all MaEari0us Diseases. Torpid
Liver, Impure Blood, Jauadfce,
Bilious Complaints, Dyspepsia
Indigestion. CostiEcIoss, Nery
Gus and Sick Headache, Colds.
Scurvy, General Weakness, and
Fever & Ague.
Moifat's PnGnix I2ifters
correct the Secrat;ons Of the
Stomach, AID are g Sure Cure
for SieePlesszless. Nervousness,
Dyspepsia, Female Complaints,
Weakness, Debility, etc.
Thousands CT Cert :icatcs are
in our possession giving perfect
CURES effected BY these InvaIu-
able medicines, and we are GER
tain that they Will do Just " hat
we have said. It is simply ask
ed that the afflicted Will TRY
THEN ONCE, their use Will con-
vince the NEST skcptical.
Pages Climax Saiye s5 cents box.
Mona.'s Life Pills % cents box.
Moifat's Phoenix BifteTs Sl.00 n bottle.
O. Sold by Druggists everywhere.
j. p. MILLS, Sole Proprietor,
SIS Liberty Street New York.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Among the herd kept in connection

Among the herd kept in connection
with the Manitoba penitentiary is q
COW which is q cross between q buffalo
and grade. The Free Press says
she is not like any other COW. either in
shape or color, the huge shoulders of
the buffalo being less prominent. whilo
the TANKS are developed as in domestic
cattle, q ridge of long dark hair covers
her spine, aud another hirsute fringe
droops from her chin and extends away
down under her belly, giving her the
appearance of some of the cattle one
sees in the pictures of Livingston's
travels in Africa. She doesn't look as
though she would shine as mixer,
but in the matter of beef would be .
success.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
NATURE's rnIUMrH.
Frazier'ss Root B1sters.

IF you are weak, or languid, use
Frazer's Bitters.
Ifyour flesh is fiabby and your COM
plexion salloW, use Frazer's Bitters.
IF you live in a malarial district, use
Frazer's Bitter's
IF worn down with the care of chill
dren, use Frazer's Bitters.
IF you have got the blues, use Fraz
er's Bitters.
IF you kept late hours and lived con-
trary to the laws of health, use Fraz
er's Root Bitters.
If you need toning up, take Frazer's
Root Bitters.
If you have abused instead of used
natures gifts, use Frazer's Bitters
lfyou feel old before your time, use
Frazer's Bitters.
Iflife has become a burden and you
have gloomy forbodings, use Frazer's
Bitters.
If your hands tremble and yoyr eyes
have grown dim, Frazer's Root Bit
tiers viii make you feel young again.
Sold by al druggists everywhere at
the low price $1.0o per bottle. It. S.
Henry Co, Sole Proprietos, Cleveland
Ohio.
For sale by McCabe & Wheaton.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Chancery Notice.
STATE OF ILLINOIS,
Rock ISLAND COUNTY,


Rock ISLAND COUNTY.
In the Circuit Court, September term. 1881.
Hattie 5. Slaughter, vs. Ernest C. Slaughter.-In
Chancery.
Affidavit 0. the nou-residence of Ernest G.
slaughter, the above defendant, having been fled
county, notice is therefore hereby given TO the
said nonresident defendant that ehe complainant
niee ner 6lil OF complaint in seid Court. on the
chancery side thereof on the 28th dav Of JIv 1881
and that thereup0n summons issued ont of said
Court, wherein said suit is now pending re tnr1a-
Bile on the first Monday in the month of Sentefnber
next. as is by law required. Now, unless YOU the
said non-resident defendant above named, shall
PERSONAL ~ be and appear before said Circuit Court
on the first day of the next term thereof. TO be
holden at Rock Island, in and for the said countv
on the first Monday in September next, and plead,
answer or demur to the said comDlainant7s bill Of
complaint, the same and the matters and things
therein charged and stated will be taken as con
fessed, and decree entered against YOU according
TO the prayer of said bill.
LEVI F. uARSON Clerk
n ROCK Island, ILL.,. July 81, 1881.
H. ID. BELL, Compts Sol. T-aGd4w
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Chancery Notice.

STATE OF ILLINOIS,
Rock ISLAND COUNTY,
In the Circuit Court, to the September term, a. D
1881.
Christine Naramore, Henry Naramore.-tr
Chancery.
The above named defendant, Henry Naramorf
will take notice that the above named complainant
Christine Naramore, has filed in said Court her bill
of complaint against you for divorce that the
above entitled cause is now pending in said Court
that q summons in chancery has been issued In
said cause against you returnabie on the first day
OF the next term OF said Court, TO be begun and
holden at the Court House. in the city of Rock ISL
and. in said county, the first Monday OF Sep
TENDER, a. D. 1881, which time and place you
will appear
Dated at Rock Island, Ills July 81. 1881.
LEVI +. HARSON,
STURGEON s OLSEN, Clerk of said COurt.
Compl'ts Solicitors. T-22d4w
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Examination of Candidates for a Custom
House Clerkship.

Thirty-four men, of ages ranging
from 81 to 40 years, sat at n number of
desks on the top floor of the Custom
House all day yesterday with large
sheets of paper before them. Not a
sound was heard except the occasional
scratching of pen and the quick walk
of attendants on the stone floor. De-
casionaIy one of the men at the desks
would hold up his hand, like child at
school, and a messenger would soon
be at his side to attend to his wants.
Generally the attendant received a
large sheet of closely written paper,
which he deposited upon desk at one
end of the room and returned with q
sheet containing a number of litho-
graphed questions, with blank spaces
beneath each one for an answer. So
the work goes on from 8 O'Clock in the
morning till in the afternoon. Then
the school is dismissed and the students
60 home.
This is a class in the civil service re-
form school. The students are appli-
cants for a 81, 200 clerl1ship. Notices
had been sent out for fifty persons to
attend the examination but only thirty
four attended, and of these some gave
up the contest before they had attempt
ed to answer haI the questions. rive
new clerks are to be appointed.
Occasionally some very ludicrous
answers are made to the questions.
An examiner, when he took up the pa
per of middle-aged man, after the
dictation exercise, was surprised to see
q perfectly blank sheet.
.'What does this mean?' he asked,
handing the man the paper.
The middle-aged man took the sheet
and gravely wrote, 81 am totally deaf "
''What two naval heroes fought on
Lake ChamplainP'' brought out the in
formation that Lord CORVALLIS and
Admiral Nelson had exchanged shots
on that sheet of water.-NeW York
World.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
4 namna;gn Incident

A crazylooking huckster wagon,
filed with the products of the farm and
garden, and drawn by dilapidated
horse attracted considerable attention
in Titusville yesterday. The occupant
of the vehicle was little old man in
homespun, who rode with one foot on
the outside of the wagon-box. Interest
in the odd-looking turnout was greatly
increased when the driver reigned up in
front of the Petroleum WoTld Office,
and raised small sign-board in his
wagon, upon which was inscribed in an
uncouth hand:
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10

more people are thoughtless than bad,
it would be absurd to suppose that the
cultivation of the social graces should
always result in crop Of weeds. III
we could only learn TO disarm criticism
by an elegant reserve of manner. to be
polite, graceful, and not too elusive at
a watering place, we should escape
much malignant and disagreeable
speech. The young aspirant for fash
ion must expect to receive some sharp
wounds, however. She is going into
the front of battle, and she must buckle
on her ar1nor.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Not Wall Ralanood

The cutter in large tailoring house
says that hardly one man in fifty is OF
well balanced shape. Writers, he says,
are low in one shoulder, and seemingly
short in one leg, the arm on the mis-
shapen side being apparently longer
than the other. Butchers, he says,
have usually low left shoulder and vi
olinists are high in one shoulder.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
COUNTRY PRODUCE
: POLITICAL ISSUES DISCUSSED.

This legend soon attracted large
crowd. when the little old man stood
up in his crazy wagon and made a
formal announcement that he had for
sale nice lot of garden produce such
as pumpkins, turnips, cabbages, some
chestnuts, etc. 81 also have,n said he,
as he lifted a faded bed-quilt from a
key, "a few gallons of hard cider,
which think is the best ever brought
TO yer town."
'.What about the political issuep"
yelled y man from the curbstone.
s'We'H come to that by-and-by-jes'
as soon as sell some ov this truck out
ov the wagon so as I kin have place
ter stand.''
The crowd realized that they had at
last struck something in the way of a
political orator, and it was plain that
they meant to encourage him, even be-
fore he had made the suggestion regard
ing business.
The cider was the first thing they
tackled. AS many men as could gath
cred around the wagon, and the cider
was closed out in short order at five
cents cup.
.sDrink hearty, gents,'' the little old
man would say, ''this remin's me Nv
the hard-cider campaign Nv 40, when
tux the stump for Old Tippecanoe; an
BESIDES it's made Nv as fine fruit as ev-
er growed on a tree"
''See herei tell us about Mainem-
yelled political man, whose thirst was
for political information.
Don't fret the CATTLE was the old
mans response.
One man bought all of the chestnuts
he had, in order, as he said, to reduce
the stock, and get around to the politi-
cal issue.
Pumpkins, squashes, parsnips, etc.,
were purchased rapidly, the old man
remarking that the drudgery of farm
life was distasteful to him. and he was
only truly happy when on the stump dis
cussing the great issues before the'people
Scraping under the seat with his feet
he unearthed gourd, and holding it
up, said:
Gents, this is the last shot in the
locker, who is the lucky man?'
Twenty-Five or thirty men, apparent
", offered to purchase it. The man
who succeeded bowled it down street
with an oath, and said what he wanted
was chin music.
The crowd was breathles5 with anx-
iety, or would have been had it not been
yelling ''speechr' s.speech!'
The little old man stood up in the
wagon. took off his hat, and said:
mo occasion for a speech now, gents.
Goods are all sold without it. If ye'd
hung fire like 1 expected ye would,
I'd harangued We till shutdown. But
We KEN right up like little men and
bought my last parsnip. That's the
way l like to do biz. Thanks, gents
The party who had been the heaviest
purchaser ran to take the horse by the
bits; but that animal laid his ears back
on his neck, and showed his teeth il
the most vicious fashion.
II forgot ter tell ye." said the old
man, quietly, mot to go near Romeo
fer he's liable ter swallow some one"
He then dropped down into his seal
and drove off, remarking that when he
went actively into politics, business II
garden truck would be a darned sigh
duller than it appeared to be now.
fnr
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
YOUNG PEOPLE.
Secure Homes for Yourselves

All persons eontemplating MARRIAGE can sa-,r.s a
Seriicats Q, endowment upon which they can start
BUSINESS an procure ald for the purpose of pur-
nieate with the MARYLAND MUTUAL BENFFT
CIAL ASSOCIATION OF Carroll County for TN
married persons, at UniontoWn Md q ,jl.p
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
Climax! Climax

Pages Climax Saiye,
A Family Blessing for rs cents.
1t heals without a scar. No
family should be without it.
We WARRANT it to CURE
Sores, Ulcers, Scrofula Sores,
Fever Sores, Salt Rheum ,s.SOre
Breasts or Nipples, Erysipelas,
Swollen Glands, Infiamed Eyes,
ScaldS, Burns, Cuts, Bruises,
Fistula, Piles, BOils, ChiIbEains,
Frosted Feet, COrnS, and all cu-
taneous diseases on man Or beast.
1t has been used ever twenty
Eve years, without ore failure.
It has no parallel having per-
fectiy eradicated disease, sand
healed af'te1 all other remedies
had failed. 1t is a compound of
Arnica with many ether Extracts
and Balsams. and put up in larger
boxes foi' the same price than any
other Ointment.
g Sold by Druggists everywhere
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10

Lieutenant Gender has advocated
that the site of the crucifixion is a
knoll north of Jerusalem, near Jere-
miah's grotto, called the ''Plaee of the
Stoning." He has sent to London a
plan Of Jewish tomb of the Herodian
period near this knoll, and he asks:
''Can this be the new sepulchre in the
rarden?''
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10

> 'Mamie," said he. and his voice Was
singularly low, ''wi1 you be nv wife?
VIII you cling to me as the tender vino
clings to the" eyes, I'll catch on
caid CHI
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
LIVER REGULATOR.
THE GENUINE has &C.

the LIvER-the largest organ of the body, called
from its importance, THE IoUsEKEEPER OF OUR
HEALTH.
When the LIVER is Torpid the bowels Slug
gish and Constipated. The food lies in the stom-
ach indigested and poisoning the blood; frequent
HEADACHES; feeling of LAssITUDE: DEsPoNDEN-
tenn is deranged. To prevent more serious con-
difion at once
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
READ THE RECORD

at saved my life - = E B Lakeiy Selma. Ala
iii is the remedy that Will cure the many diseas-
es peculiar TO women 7'-Mot8ers' Magazine.
1T has passed severe tests and won endorsement
from some Of the highest medical talent in the
cou ntry.' New York World
I mo remedy heretofore discovered can be held
for one moment in comparison with it"-Rev c
harvey, D. d, Washington, D. c.
This Remedy. which has done such wonders, is
plt up in the LARGEST SIZED BOTTLE of any
medicine upon the market, and is soll by Druggists
and all dealers at $125 per bottle For Diabetes.
enquire for WARMERS SAFE DIABETES CURE.
II is a POSITIVE Remedy
II. II. WARNER 81 CO, ROCHESTER. NY.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
- G - e = Ns;

THE LEADING SCIENTISTS OF TODAY agree tina
most diseases caused by disordered Kidneys or
Liver IT, therefore. the Kidneys and Liver are kept
in perfect order perfect health will he the result
This truth has only been known she It time and
for years people suffered great agony without being
able to find relief. The discovery of Warmers safe
Kidney and Liver Cure marks new era in the
treatment of these troubles. Made from simple
tropical leaf of value it contains just the eIe-
ments necessary to nourish and invigorate both OF
these great organs. and safely restore and keep
them In order. 1t Is POStI1N E REMEDY Tor All
the diseases that cause pains in the lower part of
the body-for Torpid Observation-Disclosures
- Dizzipess-Gravel-Fev Ague-Malarial Fever
and all difficulties of the Kidneys, Liver and Uri-
nary organs.
It is an excellent and safe remedy for females du-
ring PregGaue". II will control N enstrzation and
Is Invaluable for Leucorrhea or Falling OF the
Womb
As Blood Purifier If is unequalied, for it cures
the organs that MAKE the blood.
OMAN rEIE
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10

says: simmons Liver Regulator is acknowledg ed
to have no equal liver medicine, containing
those Southern roots and herbs which an all-wise
Providence has placed in countries where liver dis
ease nreYai >,
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10

Remember this Company OWNS all Reads above e nes
almost nyv almost any1v here nth eCeS AIMED
IMPROVEMENTS,
bEunh .
ne fine in the woEld.
enconna prominent eHIo~es
an gr d m up
by sTardM fe al thngsT
8 w. A. , i.
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
TAXI SIMMONS LIVER REGULATOR

The test of time and the experience of thousands
have proven it the best, safestt and epeediee rem
edy for all diseases of the Liver, Stomach and
Spleen As q remedy in
The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1881-08-10
MALARroUs FEvERs.

Dyspepsia, Mental Depression, Jaundice, Sick
Headache, Colo, Constipation and Bi]icusness
1t Has No Equal.
We could fill a good size volume with such like
distinguished testimonials the following:
II have used Simmons Liver Regulator for con-
stipation of my bowels caused by temporary de
rangement of the liver for the last three or fonr
years, and always when used according to the di-
rections with decided benefit
HIRAM WARNER, Late Chief Justice of Ca
Il occasionally use, when my condition requires
t. Dr. Simmons Liver Regulator with good effect.
s'Hon. ALEX. Il. STEPHENS
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1881-06-08
Why She Married.

Natures Pictures BY the Duchess Of Newcastle.
Though did dread marriage, and shun.
ned mems companies as much as could,
yet could not, nor had not, the power to
refuse him reason my affections were
6xed on him, and he was the only person I
ever was in love with. Neither was I
ashamed to own it, but gloried therein; for
it was not amorous love. I never was in
herewith; it is disease or Passion, or
both, only know by relation, not BY ex.
perience; neither could title, wealth.
power, or person entice me to love; but nv
love was honest and honorable, being
placed upon merit, which affection joy'd
at the fame of his worth, pleased with de-
light in his wit, proud of the respects he
used to me, aud triumphed in the affec-
tions he protested for me, which affections
he hath confirmed to me by deed Of time,
sealed by consistency, and assigned by an
unalterable decree Of his promise, which
makes me happy in dispight Of fortunes
frowns. For though misfortunes may and
do often dissolve base, wild, loose, and
ungrounded affections, yet she hath no
power of those that are united either by
merit, justice, gratitude, duty, fidelity,
or the like; and though my lord hath lost
his estate and banished out Of his country
for his loyalty to his king and country,
yet neither despised poverty nor pinch
ing necessity could make him break the
bonds of friendship, nor weaken his loyal
duty to his king and country.