The Florida agriculturist. [volume] (DeLand, Fla.) 1878-1911, 1881-03-02
VARIETIES.

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hung up stocking.
There is an old saying that eff
you keep anything seven years it
will come in style" All right; then
! poverty is stylish, and we're in style.
James" said Mrs. Buzzer to her
eldest boy, II see in the paper that
Rewsha has issued some uItimatum
You'd better git some for your
hair"
There is no accounting tor taste
A summons in ach-of-promise
suit against the bridegroom was sent
! in among the bridal presents at an
Iowa wedding.
Says the New Haven Register
What merry sound the scrape of
the snow shovel has upon the morn
ing air, Especially if you are snug
in bed, and somebody else is doing
the shoveling.
A single sin, however apparently
trjfiing, however, hidden in some OBJ
scure corner of our Consciousness
a sin we do not intend to renounce-
is enough to render real prayer i'm.
practicable.
''Gem'len," said the old man, ere.
member dat it is not safe to form an
oplnyun on stranger by de size of
his mouf or De number Of his hat.
No pusson kin tell de number of
mules in barn by lookin at de sta
BILE doah."
"It you don't behave yourself I'll
lock you up in the chicken house,"
said Galveston mother to her bad
little boy. You may lock me up in
the chicken house as much as you
please, but l won't lay eggs; no, in
deed, won't"
A very excellent lady was desired
by another to teach her what secrets
she had to preserve her husbands
favor at is" she, by doing all
that pleases him, and enduring pa
tiently all that displeases me-" One
woman in 10000.
Aslittle girl of twelve years, the
daughter Of clergyman, was asked:
'sSadie, does your papa ever preach
| the same sermon twice Z" After
t ihhJlRltiR q 3 da94al;sTens siEeD!isa
He was a fine looking man, and he
| proudly strutted down the sidewalks
with the air of proprietorship in
every movement. BEG pardon"
said stranger as he stepped up to
him, hat in hand, in utmost humility
"Do 1 have your permission to re
main in town over night?'
A Baltimore Philosopher says that
no man can ever rise above that at
| which he aims. At the same time
we have known a man TO aim to be a
Mississippi river steamboat captain,
and rise above his position about
$50 feet. He was greatly esteamed
by the company.
An experienced matron says: GA
man will eat soggy biscuits twice a
week without a complaint when his
girl invites him out to tea, but when
the girl becomes his wife, if there is
the faintest suspicion of saleratus in
them the neighbors will think the
district school is out for recess by
: the racket he makes"
A New York lady, while ont shop.
ping a few Gays ago, mysteriously
lost $4,000. What carelessness
Editors wives never lose $4,000
while out shopping. Their husbands
provide against that by not giving
them no more than $4,000 when
they start out to buy bonnets and
seal skin sacques and things.
A man having announced that he
was once in community where they
f all minded their own business, his
statement was doubted, and he was
called upon to tell where it was. ut
was on board ship at sea, and the
passengers were all too sick to med
die with one another's affairs"
Mr.. O'Dwyer rents a shanty on
Galveston avenue from old man
Chrysler, a prominent citizen. Yes
terday Chrysler called in to collect
the rent. and O'Dwyer showed him
over the house, complaining of it's
Inconvenience. Said O'Dwyer
'Mishter Chrysler your house is in
toirly too low on the ground TO be
healthy, the caleings are too low and
the door amt high enough" "Mr.