Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1881-05-28
Feminine Politics.
WHAT MRS. sPooPENDYK LEARNED
CONCERNING THE DEADLOCK.
IBrooklyn Eagle.1

~
"My DEAR" said Mrs. SpoopeI
dyke, holding piece of lace to he
overskirt and wondering whethe
she had better plait it on or full 1t
'my dear, who is this Congressma
Lock who has just died ~
"What Congressman Lock I
asked Mr.. Spoopendyke.
8 "Why, read in the paper thi
$ morning that they couldn't do an,
business because of the dead MI
Lock. Did you know him ~
''That ain't Congressman" sait
Mr.. spo0pSlldyke. .sYou reat
there ~ 4 deadlock ln the Sen
ate. Maeal tAak .,...,,.,
HsYes, and ] read It aN through
and when found that Mr.. Conk.
ling felt so bad about 1t, though,
Mr.. Lock must be a congressman
"No he isn't either. The dead.
lock means that the Democrats and
Republicans can't agree"
"Good gracious! Have they had
another falling out7 l shouldn't
think the Republicans would fight
the poor Democrats any more.
What haye they been doing now ~
"They haven't been doing any
thing. Sen. Malone, of Virginia,
went over to the Republicans,
and" @
81 see," interrupted Mrs. Spoop-
endyke, 'sand Mr.. Oonkling won't
have him confirmed. Though l
can't understand why they should
interfere with Mr.. MahOne's relig.
ion. If the poor man wants to join
the church l."
"Who wants to join the church :?
Who's church? ? Think Mr.. Conk-
ling's bishop7 Got all idea he's
an altar? S'pose he's dod gasted
chapel with ivy all over him, a
spike fence and a chime of bells 7
It's Stanley Matthews he don't
want confirmed"
II read about him too," rejoineb
Mrs. Spoopendyke. Giles Mr..
Garfield's Collector, isn't hei
"No he amt. That's Judge Rob-
ertson, Mr.. Garfield wants Judge
Robertson for collector, and Mr..
Conkling is opposed to him."
81 don't see why he should be.
Though of course / should suppose
Mr.. Garfald would rather have q
man like Mr.. Malone, who is going
into the church."
"Where's your sense 2" snorted
Mr.. Spoopendyke. "What dye
want to mix things up forf Trying |
to make grab bag of prominent
Americans9 Stanley Mathews is
candidate for Judge. Mr.. Malone
is Senator, and Robertson is ap-
pointed Collector, but, like Math-
ews, hasn't been confirmed. Can
you see through that ~
"Of course, l understood that.
but / don't see any excuse for fight.
ing the Democrats, unless they
think that Mr.. Robertson would
collect money from Mr.. Malone,
and Mr.. Mathews would send him
to Jail. In that case it"
"In that case it wonld take you
to straighten 'em out! squealed Mr..
Spoopendyke. "Whal're you try
ing to get up now, an idiot asyIumi
Are you planning for murder and
trying to get up an insanity plea
What dye think Robertson's going
to collect, hens7 Got a notion that
Matthews is a penitentiary, sitting
around to be leased out? Imagine
Malone to be the National debt |
Well, they amt, they're men, tell
ye. Men with legs" and Mr..
SpOopendyke kicked ont both his
own foothandles by way of illustra-
ton. "Conkling is opposed to
Matthews and Robertson. He says |
they shan't be confirmed, but he is
a friend of Mahone."
"Thats what didn't see," said
Mrs. SpOOpendyke. 81 am glad
Mr.. Malone will be confirmed,
though / don't care for Mr.. Mat
thews and Mr.. Robertson. 1t will
teach them TO repent their sins and
not fly into the face of providence.
Pm glad Mr.. COnkling is a good
EplScOpallan.'
"Ohf he's a prayer book howled
Mr.. Spoopendyke. You've found
him out! You've got him! All he
wants is a red cushion and rack
nailed up in front of him to be a
dOd gasted mOurner's bench Didn't
l tell ye he was "a Senator Do you
know what a Senator isl It's some.
thing shaped like pie, a measly
piei Understand it nOw9
"And is Mr.. Malone Senator,
tOOf asked Mrs. SpoOpendyke, u
new light dawning upon her.
s.No he amt a Senator p grinned
Mr.. Spoopendyke, she's lightning
rod to keep bowling idiots from
falling overheard. Begin to see
it, And they want him confirmed,
so if he finds any dog-gasted old
female named Spoopendyke slop-
I