Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1881-08-18
THE HAWKEYE ALMANAC.
A New Catalogue of the Signs of the
Weather,

a New Catalogue of the Signs of the
Burlington Hawkeye
1t is an easy matter enough to fore
cast the weather like Prof. Tice and
Mr.. Vennor if people will only give
their minds TO it. By closely reading
and studying the predictions of these
great weather breeders, we have de-
duced the following rules, by which he
makes all his forecasts. Hindcasts of
the weather are not made until the
next day.
An intensely blue sky indicates a
temporary absence of clouds. Under
other circumstances, again, an intense
ly blew sky indicates tornado.
When a woman leaves a piece OF
soap on the stairs where her husband
will tread upon it, it is a dead sure
sign of storm.
When the sun rises behind a bank of
clouds, and the clouds hang low all
around the horizon, and all over the
sky, and the air feels damp, and there
is fine drizzling mist blowing, the in
dications are there Will be rain some
where in the United States or Canada.
When it begins to thunder, look out
for lightning.
When man gets up in the night,
and feels along the top pantry shelf in
the dark, and knocks the big square
bottle without any label down to the
floor and breaks it, it is sign there is
going to be a dry spell until I or 8
o'clock in the morning.
When the spring millinery ol,, nings
are advertised, look for bright So nv
weather all around the house, VI Ii
treacherous calms and rising baron G.
ter, indicative of sudden tempests and
mean temperature.
When the cradle begins to vibrate
with irregular, spasmOdic motions
about o'lock in the morning, look out
for signals, and try to remember where
you put the paregoric the last time you
used it.
When the youngest boy in the fami-
ly comes home three hours after school
hours, with his hair wet and his shirt
wrong side out, look out for a spank
ing breeze.
To see the head of the family feeling
in his right hand pocket, then in the
left hand pocket, then in all his vest
pockets, then in his hip pocket, then
in his coat pockets, and then at the
ceiling, indicates mo change"
If he suddenly stops whistling at the
ceiling and expands his face into a
broad grimace of delight, it means sun
expected change"
If the spring bonnet comes home
trimmed on the right side for the wear
ers seat in church, and has two more
sprigs and three more dandelions than
the bonnet of the woman in the next
pew, it is ''set fair"
The weather during the whole of
Thanksgiving week-+**E ***t c) =!
An unusually large number of spi-
ders presages very mild or very
open winter, as the case may be.
If the corn husks are very thick, the
winter will be colder than the summer.
If the corn husks are very thin, the
summer will be warmer than the win
ter.
If the corn husks are neither too
thin nor too thick, the summer will
be warm and the winter will be cold.
If the weather propeht predicts a
rainy season and it happens TO rain
way out in Calaveras county, and it is
dry as bone all over the rest of Amer
lea, this rain must be set down to the
credit of the weather breeder, and all
the dry time counts for nothing.
If the weather breeder predicts very
dry month and the raging floods sweep
all the country in one wild, drowning del
uge except Newton Upper Falls, Mass,
then people must say that sure enough
old Vennor said it was going to be dry
this month.
Still, it is just as we'll to bear in
mind, when you read the wild prognos-
tications of Mr.. Vennor and his great
rival that a rain 1,500 miles square no
more makes rainy day on this conti-
nent than fly speck on the dome of
the capitol makes the District of Co.
lumbia, or even the dome, black. Any
body can say, "there will be rain and
thunder storms and cyclones in the
United States during July" and it
would be a mighty safe thing to bet
money on. What we want, what the
country clamors for, is a man who can
tell us when and where the cyclone is
going to strike, and whom it will hit,
And up to date that man hasn't said a
word about the weather.