St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1881-03-25


with a hand-caTt, who went about the
streets of New Albany at that time.
On application to him he consented,
mission. We delivered the whole
stock at once. The junkman wanted
name for it. BY dint of looking
steadfastly at the Venetian blinds in
the window. one of us originated the
name of Venetian Polish" But the
iunk-deaer said that would not do.
People liked French things. So he
proposed to dub it "French Venetian
POLISH and, without listening to any
remOnstrances on our part, he marched
off, sold the article, but forgot to make
any return to the manufacturers.
often think that many patent nostrums
are named about as intelligently as our
poor "French Venetian Polish"
| have heard. OF read, that there was
in one of the larger western towns a
man who called himself an "Indian
Doctor who was all the vogue, to the
great chagrin of the regular physicians.
At last lie had an amputatiOn to per-
form, and the consulting physicians, Ie-
gardless of the patient, stood off to see
the Ignorant man make fool of him
self. To their surprise, he performed
the operation well. One of the doctors
took him aside and inquired how he
knew so much of surgery, upon which
the quack showed diploma, saying
pretend to quackery. Upon this being
reported to the others, one of them
said: ''We'll ruin him now" which
they did by reporting everywhere that
he was regularly educated physician.
Indian medicine among the Indians
themselves is, for the most part, blind
superstition and arrant impOsture. The
savages can dress wounds fairly well,
and they may know some simples that
are good, but not half so good as the
remedies in use among civilized people.
Their chief reliance for a cure seems to
be the keeping up of an unearthly
bowling over the bed of the patient, by
way of driving off the evil spirits. 1t
is only the state of semi-savage igno-
rance of scientific matters in which the
prevalent methods of education leave
our people that makes them so eager to
accept Indian, Persian, Egyptian or
American quackery in preference to
scientific treatment.
One of my school-mates was hard of
bearing. In his childhood, the physi-
clans having failed to relieve the deaf
ness which came as one of the sequels
of fever, the family resolved to con-
suit a famous Egyptian doctor" in
Cincinnati, and relative of mine was
the messenger for this purpose. This
! Egyptian doctor, who was only a
,,arbono Nryifh
plices, did not ask for lock of hair,
but wished to have the middle finger of
the sufferer dipped into water in GER
tain way, so that only the middle OF
the finger should be wetted. The water
was then bottled and taken to him. In
the present case he complained that
others had put their hands into the wa
ter, and it was necessary to make g
second trial by the time this was done,
the doctor had secured information
enough to startle the family, and great
ly increase his reputation for the pos
session of the black art.
| suppose one must attribute to the
singular inefficiency of our school sys-
tens the strange tendency to supersti-
ton in medicine, as well as much pref
udice in other matters, SO prevalent
among the mass of our people. | have
known families who regularly employed
two physicians in their families, an
allopathic physician for the adults anC
a homeopathist for the children, ,-oT
the plan, | suppose, of giving to each
one pills according to his size. | have
known people, otherwise sane, to stanC
an asthmatic boy up against a growing
tree, bore hole at his exact height
and insert a lock of his hair, driving il
peg after it, and then cutting the hal
from his head. The superstition is tina
when the boy grows above that lock o
hair, his asthma will vanish. Anon,
more ignorant people, the blood of
black hen is sometimes used for erysip
elias, and the oil of Il black dog is ap
piled for rheumatism, and, to m.
knowledge, astonishing cures of con
sumption have been wrought by ad
t ministering internally the oil from
} large black dog. Pills made from spi
der webs cure the ague, and so ais
will caterpillars worn around the necI
as beads. The two last are simili
SimilibuS the shuddeIing produced b.
: the remedy cures the shaking of th
ague, | suppose. Something of tn
same notion is found. no doubt, in tn
application of the flesh of the rattle
snake to cure its own bite. There i:
: possibly, real benefit sIOm this, til
tissues of the newly killed snake ali
? sorbing some of the poison that woul
J therwise he distributed through the hu
= man system.
3 One of the rarest quacks | have eve
| known was a man whose mind was pos
] itively feeble in everything but Gun
' ming. He was greatly sought after a
/ doctor fol- children by people wb
,. would not trust him to treat grow
| folks the measure of his intellect bein
h. Just suited to the size of a child. II
3. was always boasting of his success.
e "How are you, Doctor w. 2" / sal
a one day.
5 Il am we'll, and my patients are dc
ing well, too" he answered, character
b istically.
y He took an active part in politics an
= secret societies, for the sake of talkin
# about his patients, until he became
Il by-word. Once in political meetin
o he was appointed on a committee. Ii
o stantly he was on his feet.
!, "Mr. Chairman" he drawled, IL HOP
: you'll excuse me. | must leave til
+ house at once to see patient"
# .Mr. Chairman" cried another,
{ hope you will excuse Doctor w. an
e let him 90 and see this patient. Th
J. is the first patient he has had i'll
IS month
If have had this man assure me that
patient would get well, when lie WI
e actually and visibly in the very artic
:. of death from consumption at the IN
Y ment. and was dead an hour afterwar
n The ignorant quack probably believe
NJ. ~ hot he snih He ,vns only n child ren