The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1881-04-15
First Trousers.

become q man. Now, the first evil
dence of manhood, the first serious step
made in life, is the wearing OF trousers.
The first pair of trousers is an event
desired by the father and dreaded by the
mother. To the mother it is the begin
ming CT the end. She looks with moist
eyes at the little petticoat forever aban-
doned, and says to herself: g. have
lost my baby; my reign has ended; and,
alas! how soon. He will have new
tastes, new desires; he is no more mine,
his individuality asserts itself, he is
somebody, he is a boy"
The father, on the contrary, is
charmed. He laughs in his sleeve as he
looks at the slender calves which emerge
from the trousers. He feels the little
body so clearly outlined under the new
garments, and says to himself: g How
well he is formed, the jolly little dog
he will have my broad shoulders and
sturdy legs-how strongly he stands!"
He would like to see him in boots, and
it would not take much to make him
buy him pair of spurs. For the first
time he sees himself reflected in his little
boy. He looks at him as at picture
hung in new light, and for the first
time, too, he finds it excessively agreea-
BILE to call him .smy son.
As for the baby himself, he is intoxi-
Gated, glorious, triumphant, but all the
same little embarrassed by his arms
and legs, and, if we might hint it with
out offense, very like young goose
which has been plucked at the approach
of warm weather.
The greatest annoyance of the poor
little man is his past. How many grown
men have been annoyed in the same
manner! He feels deeply that trousers
involve obligations that he must take
on new WAYS, new gestures; if possible,
a new tone of voice. He even begins to
ape the ways of his father, who, per-
ceiving it, is not one whit displeased.
He essays masculine gestures, and this
struggle between his latent babyhood
and his would be manhood, gives him
the most comical air in the world. His
petticoat follows him persistently and
almost enrages him.
Dear little trousers, 1 love you, for
you are faithful friends, and we meet
you at every turn in life, with all your
gentle following. Are you not the re-
Election of each new promise which
tickles our vanity?
You, young officer, who look at your
mirror as you don for the first time
epaulet and spur, what feeling moves
you as you hear your sword click at your
side? Belted, booted and brushed, ell
bows we'll back, your kepe over the ear,
you walk through the street; can you
resist looking into the dark windows as
you pass? A "reminiscences of your first
trousers, is it not?
You will find them again, these first
trousers, when you are made Captain,
and receive decoration. Again, later,
when a gray -mustached old soldier, you
will take little wife to reiuvenate you.
Again you will put them on, but this
time the little vile will help you to wear
them.
My friend, the day when you will have
nothing more to do with them, you will
be
In the dust, low lying,
for all mans life is embodied in this gar
ment. Life holds little else for man
but to put on his first trousers, take them
off, and die while looking at them.
Is it true, wonder, that the greater
part of our joys have no more serious
cause than the joys of childhood? Are
we so silly? Yes, my friends, we are
silly enough to think we are wise. We
never quite get rid of our baby clothes;
some little rag always stays by us. A
trife of babyhood remains with us all,
Or, to phase it better, we are but babies
grown big.
And you, prettiest of women, does not
each new season bring its joys with its
new costumes? Do not say these joys
are but secondary, for their influence is
powerful upon. both your temper and
t5harac er. Would it be rude to ask why
last Sundays sermon was so logical,
persuasive, elegant? Why your blue
eyes were filled with tears as you came
out of church, and why you were i'm
PEELED to kiss your husband as soon as
you reached home? You know as well
rs l, madam, that upon that day that
charming little old-gold bonLet (Which
is charming, l admit, and makes you
twice as pretty as usually was worn for
the first time.
These are the things that can not be
eXpldlucu, cullUlSu, IL you WILL UuG b
sortof childishness of which one can not
rid himself.
will give you an instance. When
returning the other day from hearing
one of our most eloquent divines, pull
preliminary, your emotions were abso-
lutely different. A general discomfort
pervaded your being, doubts assailed
you, nervous irritability seized you at
each phrase of the preacher, your mind
was in no heavenly frame, and you came
out of the church with hot head and cold
feet, forgetting yourself so far as to say,
rs you stepped into your carriage, that
.sthe reverend gentleman lacked sense. T"
And the coachman heard you say it.
And to crown all, as you entered your
house, your drawing-room seemed too
narrow and your husband too wide.
Do you wish to know the reason of
these successive annoyances? If you
think well you remember that it was
upon that day that you wore for the first
time that odious little purple bonnet,
which was so frightfnlly unbecoming.
First trousers, dear lady.
Lot mo give Won one mora instanco