The daily gazette. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1874-1883, 1881-04-23
SPRING.
Now York Times.

Mr.. Tennyson is to very large extern
responsible for the prevalence of The
opinion set forth by him in verse that IL
the spring young mans fancy lightly
turns to the thoughts of love. 1t doel
not do anything Of the kind. Mr.. Ten.
nyson 10 the last person who has a right
to express any opinion concerning The
conduct Of lovers. His writings show
that he knew nothing whatever about
them. There Is his Mariana, who, be
tells us, sits year after year la the moat-
ed grange bewailing the fact that she,
her lover, cometh not : whereas q real
Mariana would have stayed in the
grange about two days, and at the end Of
that time would have gone up to Lon
dan, engaged lawyer and brought an
action for breach Of promise. There, too,
10 Enoch Arden, who, ON returning
home to see his wife contents himself
with looking at her through the back
window, and then, after rolling over the
vegetable beds, goes away and dies in a
boarding house. Had Enoch been true
man he would have pitched the intercal-
AIRY husband out OF the window or ar
ranged jndicious compromise with
him. In either case he would have
claimed his wife and died comfortably In
his own front bedroom. The lnabil ity
TO comprehend the feelings Of lovers as
shown in these and other Instances, rem
ders Mr.. Tennyson entirely unfit to tell
us what time OF year or in what circum-
stances young mans fancy turns 10
thoughts OF love.
Spring is precisely the season of the
year when men, whether young or old,
never think Of making love. This is
due TO variety OF causes. In Spring no
less than 10 per cent. Of girls residing in
the so-called temperate zone have colds
In the head. The young man who calls
TO see girl at this season is either told
that she is not at home, or he is admit
ted to gaze on watery eyes and a ruddy
nose, and 10 listen to wailings concern
ing the discomfort of gold in the 'ead.'
Obviously Q girl In such condition does
not attract the light or the heavy fancy
Of any discriminating young man. The
fame Of love can be easily shifted out in
early spring, or mere handkerchief
can ext nguish it.
Spring being thus what might be
called, after the manner of sporting
men, close season for girls, it is the
most unpropitious of all seasons for
love making. Not only is it untrue
that in the spring the fancy of young
men turns girlward, but, in point of
fact, there are other objects which in
evitably attract masculine fancy. One
of these is the subject of clothing.
The young man cannot make up his
mind whether on any given day he
shoUld wear heavy overcoat or light
overooat. IL he wears the former, he
is sure to be uncomfortably warm, and
if he wears the latter, he inevitably
takes cold. Hence, there is a CON.
slant struggle in his mind, feverish
uncertainty which cannot fail to ban
ish all thoughts of love. No man can
use the language of affection with any
success while he Is suffering from too
warm clothing, and still less can he
manage to please fastidious woman
when his MIND is pre-occupied with
the conviction that he has certainly
taken cold and that pnemonia is about
to claim him as a victim. 1t is true
that conversation between the sexes
may be carried on in spring, but its
subject matter is usually tho efficacy
OF mustard plasters, or the compare
tive value of chlorate of potash and
alum as remedies for sore throat.
Then, with the advent of spring
most young men are brought face 10
face with the problem how to pay for
a spring suit Of clothes. Surely there
is no more dangerous foe of love than
the tailor's bill. In January the young
man can buy flowers or opera boxes,
or hire carriages, or pay for supper,
for he has more or less money in his
pocket, and the boarding house keeper
and the wash-woman can be made to
wait. But when there is question of
ordering clothes, the young man feels
his poverty. He must make a pay
ment on that old account before the
tailor will consent to trust him for a
new suit. Thus he has no money to
spare for the purposes of courtship,
and his mind IN too much occupied |
with the financial problem to admit of |
softer and sweeter thoughts.
And then, provided the young man |
lives in the country, there is the spring |
mud. How can lie think of going to |
see any young lady when he must walk
through a quarter of a mile of mud |
"hN pAooShs hAuoOA1 DCAOEo HoT VIII
the boots of an active agriculturist and
the muddy trousers of patrolman I
The thing is clearly out of the question,
and the young man is compelled, as a
matter of self-respect, to stay at home
till fine weather begins and the roads
are dry.
Mr.. Tennyson may plead that In
making his preposterous assertion con-
corning the spring habits of lovers he
had in mind only the particular young
man who was in the habit ofsitting on
the moor and repeating pretty verses
his cOnsin Amy, instead of
boldly walking up to Locksley Hall,
calling on that respectable matron and
an invitation to dinner. Let
rs accept this explanation, and admit
that this idioUIcal young mans fancy
did turn to thoughts ofhis cousin Amy
between the first of March and the last
Of April. Much good it did him. Miss
Amy undoubtedly took the ground
that she would have nothing to do
with young man who came with
muddy boots TO call on her when she
lad cold in her head. This was the |
'eal reason why she dismissed him and
married the other man and the story !
,ught to convince Mr.. Tennyson that {
nrinor 10 not a 0OOd fiTna for lou a moi