The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1881-09-22
Cbisilrs.

Hit hark h1if 81 hit EAbc Huatae
TAI siseasn. ia 0ihe ais ~ lou iAsi
mil Ses s.le'a We sl.ss ars soing ma
h&nfrrpiSg.
ns~ 80 iLlrty-,~o ctrrnss 10 ,b'
Unsiei g,ssss. aud each oss Is The hlsges'
show oa earth
-wbfn Nsw orleans man waited BIZ
picture iu an hsToie attitude. The sriis'
pAislsa Lii4 Ia tho az q refusing "a
drini
1t ient l~oSuts woman y exact!
Hffald n css that sbs runs away and
sgnAu. Il i heospse sorea dresses ara
4 fa.hieuslls
Il masi have bcon great relief "a
4 lam. after bis fall. TIA, there were DOT a
dozen orno indignant neighhors 70 kick
lsm after ac uAs down.
fherc - slvays something 10 rmird
msn Of il,s shor,poes 81 life, even n IT be
naihing more than q drug store OF doc.
iof buggy.
There Is man IN 81, L>suis ~ho has a
wonderfui memory !, is thought the
city wiIl eventually employ him 10 remem.
i.sr the Sabbath
III you grasp raiilesnAke firmly
shout the ncck. be- cauno, huri you, says a
wrstern paper 10 he perfectly safe, il
~onld be well 70 lci the hired man do the
grAspIng
- hoy defined salt as 'ihe stuff that
makes potatoes taste bad when you don't
pat il on. He Was twin brother 10 the
boy who said that pins had saved a great
many lives by not being swallowed.
>an exchange speaks Of a rich heiress
When young man makes up his mind 10
marry an heiress, we advise him TO select
q rich one poor heiress is a delusion
al / snare. and hollow mockory.
-- The International Medical Congress
would not admit the lady doctors. The
lAdIos looked so killing, the male physi.
Clans we're naturally jealous Of them.
When rural resort landlord thinks q
city man is putting on too many airs, he
merely says as he hands him the key TO
his room a, night "Be careful to turn out
,ae gas; don't blow il out +"
"Why am so melancholy to.nightg"
she asked her devoted Albert, as they
sat gazing wistfully at the lovely moon,
Il guess. my love, be replied anxiously,
1T was because you ate that box Of sar-
dimes at supper
"A chap Ia Oregon married four wives
within four miles OF each other and wasn't
found out until the four happened TO meet
at picnic aud showed the same kind OF
dollar store earrings
An Irisbman wrote thus TO the wife OF
sick brother: III jamie isn't dead yet.
remind him OF the twinty shillings he
owes me on the pigs, and il he is tell him
not 10 give himself any consurrn about it. "
The editor OF Carson paper was ask
81 by an inquiring stranger il it was pos
Sible that little town kept up four news.
papers and the reply was; mo; 1t takes
-four newspapers to keep up the town"
One can't be too careful with firearms.
A Marathon boy carried pistol in his coat
pocket, and one day recently, while he was
in swimming. the pistol unexpectedly
went or He has no suspicious as to who
took It,
~ Young man from the country saw
steam fire engines working at confagratien
upon his yisi, TO the city and asked his
father. "What In thunder makes EN- heal
the water by steam to put fire out witha
Cold waters a darn sight better"
~ IN restaurant Gent TO the waiter
Bring me some grammatical and typo
graphical errors" Waiter looking puz-
lied at ilst, bnt recovering in a moment
his usual sercuity)--"Wc'ro Just out Of
them, sir" Gent Then what do you
mean by keeping them on your bill Of
fare
-"Pa, quoth ssmmie, TO his sire,
why don't Jon go out West?" "Why do
YOU ask, my boy?" because Bill Hig-
gins went there, aud he struck banana.
a bonanza yon moan, Sammie." "Well,
what's the difierence?' why, when peo-
Pile strike bonanza, ii sets them up; and
when they strike banana, it sets them
down .
The Irish remains known as Con
O'Neill's Castle, Castlereagh, were order.
ed by their proprietor to be incloscd with
a wall built aronnd the ruins II ever
there wasa Hibsrnian bull. the agent Of
the estate perpetrated one on this occasion
fur he actually pulled down the ruins
themselves TO obtain stone for wall to in
close them,
a Galveston man named Josephns G. |
Morgan, who is also great nuisance, is
cyrflas,ingly abusing the female sex. The
other day lac said TO John w. Smith;
There would be fewer evils in the world |
II il were not for women" Yes" re
sponied Smith. "you yourself wouldn't
he IN IL Aud now they hardly speak.
The "originai" Of "Uncle Tom" went |
70 see !, plarel on the stage recently and
vep, profusely. "Docs il bring the mem
orr Of old timcs'" they asked him. do
SORROWS long forgotten come back to you
aud nake your heart ache;" NO" he
said ~ amt dat rs weeping ober. But.
II you bcheld yo'selves pc 'troyed
as dat mis'able idiot portrayed me,
wouldn't you weep
Papa" said an inquisitive boy,