Weekly Chillicothe crisis. (Chillicothe, Livingston Co., Mo.) 1878-19??, 1881-07-28
The Wedding-Ring.

There is manifested in some parts of
the west, says the New York Times, a
desire TO abolish the wedding-ring.
This is not strange. The wedding-ring
has been fruitful source of woes un-
numbered, which any heavenly goddess
might sing with great applause should
she feel so disposed. Tales of the ut
most horror have been told of BRIDE
grooms, who, at the mOmen wnen the
clergyman pauses for the ring to be
produced, can not find it. Nothing
has ever shown half SO much skill in
self-concealment as the wedding-ring.
1t will hide in the corner of a waistcoat
pocket in such way as to defy discov-
cry, and it will transport itself from
one pocket to another, thus compelling
the bridegroom TO ransack every one of
thirteen distinct pockets. Nervous
men--and who is not nervous when
personally undergoing the marriage
ceremony?-frequently drop the we'd
ding-ring on the church floor, where it
will roll the entire length of the build
ing TO conceal itself in some inaccessa-
bic crack. Sometimes it finds or makes
a hole in the pocket, by means of which
ii penetlates into the interior of the
bridegroOms clothing, and even into his
boots; so that it is quite a common oc-
curance for a wedding to be interrupt
ed while the bridegroom retires behind
the pulpit and devOtes half an hour to
searching for the ring and to getting
his boots on again. As men are noto.
riously married in new boots, and as Il
new boot when once removed cannot
always be dragged on again without
bOOt-hooks, the wedding guests are
sometimes treated to the spectacle of a
bridegroom going through the last half
Of the ceremony with one boot in its
proper place and the other held in his
left hand. There was a time when the
careful western man always kept the
wcdding-ring in his mouth until the
clergyman called for ii, but this Gus.
tom has now fallen into disuse. Fas-
tidiOus clergymen and brides, who had
contracted the conventional IDEAS of
the east, objected to the use of Il warm,
moist ring Moreover, in his embar-
rassment the bridegroom often failed
to distinguish between the ring and his
tobacco, and found when ii was too
late, that he habitat is to say, that
the ring was missing. Then, too, there
were several unfortunate bridegrOOms
who unintentionally swallowed we'd
ding-rings, and thus laid themselves
open to misconstructiOn. There was
one man, reported to be of miserly
habits, who, doubtless inadvertently,
swallowed a wcdding-ring known to be
of considerable value, and chOked to
death in the process. This would nat
urally have incOnyenienced the bride,
had not her brOthcrs-twO practical
mcn--beCn present. With great pres
enCc of mind the brothers removed the
chOked bridegroom to the rear of the
church, where they recovered the ring
with their hunting-knives, and, press
ing an eligible young man into the SER
vice, enabled their sOrrowing sister to
be happily married after delay of on
ly ten minutes. Still, one instance like
this does not compensate for the many
cases in which swallowed rings have
produced suffering and inconvenience,
and it is no wonder that the custom of
holding the ring in the mouth has be-
come obsolete.
The freedom of divorce which pre-
walls in many of our states must in
eyitably render the wedding ring un-
popular. Every time wife is divorced
she naturally wishes to take off her
ring. If it is made small enough to re-
main safely on the finger, it is very
apt to become so tight at the end Of
two or three months of matrimonial
felicity that it cannot be removed.
Hence with a view to contingencies,
the Illinois wife always has her ring
made several sizes too large for her,
and keeps it in place with another
ring, technically known us the guard
llnls , 4. 10 eNiu1n'' ,,i noMeNcl, , ''i"U @ lilo
su"iu !, ii.s c 70 - ,'aulo @ 70 oecolnV ptili t,'
t1en!ly n 'iAeu @ vi, '''e ni,sel, 81 una. siiia ID
really useless. The only remedy is to
abolish wedding rings altogether, and
~ ~ oi,i,v ii, ION W t,Ic lnaIii"se ceremony
'''i u''''S'o' " 'nc iN's
The weddlng'rlng is a survival OF
the period when marriage was held to
be sacrament, and was supposed to
be OF eternal duration. Now that we
have rejected this belief, and hold that
marriage is II business affair, Il tenn
porary partnership, the impropriety of
clinging to the symbolic ring is mani
neot and inevnansivo hracelet made On
| "a ~ M Of Il Nf