The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1881-08-25

4
sol ihe other has his hll Of bear.
Notice at the door Of "a ready made
rloibing establishment 10 one OF the poor
81 quarters Of Paris DO not go some
where elso 70 b. robbed walk Ia here.
!, is VERY easy for s.sy-at home fami.
iies 10 imagine themselves at the sesshore.
All they have 10 do is TO catch few flies
and stick them in tho butter.
The giraffe isa very timid animal.
liis neck is 40 long that when his heart
comes into bis mouth il takes him half u
'iAy TO get !, back where IT belongs
II takes cIgh, hundred full blown
roses 10 make teaspoonfnl OF perfume,
lille ten cents worth Of cooked onions
viii seen, whole neighborhood.
We have heard considerable about the
habit girls have Of sitting on one leg. It's
very bad one, particularly il the leg
doesn't belong TO the young lady
When you read the seductive legend
iia tobacconist's window: "Our fyecent
gars cant be beat, remember il they
cant he beat they may be cabbage.
"A boy Of twelve years, dining at his
nnclc's, made such good dinner that his
aaot observed Johnny, you appear to
,at well. +" ''Yes." replied the urchin. II
have been practicing eating all my life
ooh, doctor. said Mrs Philadelphia,
vt the Rowland House, Long Branch,
Johnny has eaten ice cream, cucumbers,
watermelon and soft shell crabs. What
shall loG' Better send for an under
iaker, said the doctor
Mrs. Joscar had just returned from
visit 10 the seashore, and was giving her
family summary Of the fare upon which
she had been snbsisting. After moments
ab,traetion, she remarked, "and as for des-
serts, We always had two. and oftener
three
IL is getting to be a common street
scene In New York to see a woman with a
burglar in her grasp, looking for a police.
man The burglars there are getting so
bold and daring that the police are excus.
able for keeping ont Of the way. They
might get hurt.
A Californian who tied one end OF q.
rope around his waist aud lassoed a COW
with the other. reports that ''at first he
thought that he had the COW. but at the
end Of the first half mile he became con.
WINGED that the COW had him.
Veil. velll' exclaimed Baron Fiddle.
dcdec, as he gazed at Niagara from the
balcony Of the Clifton house, ''vot bros
beet und yot a waste mid water! ! dink
dare vos nefier such e1travagances as init
der American boobies Der idea off dis
waste oxcides me NIT dreadfuls.
Samuel. said Miss Pussy Cat New,
Of Boston, to the hotel waiter at Rye
Beach. there is foreign substance in
my soup inconsistent with the title given
the liquid on the menu 'What dye
soyy" exclaimed the waiter. "Oh, for
goodness sake ! You stupid take the tea
leaves out Of my soup"
The curative properties OF the
waters, writes the eldest Miss Prig, Of
Boston, iron, Riehfield Springs. "are Of
such thorough character that q wart
which dis6gured the termination Of my ma
nal organ has entirely disappeared, and ]
anticipate the exodus Of a similar freak OF
nature which rests upon my chin TO my
complete modification"
And the style Of beauty Of our
American girls, said Mrs, Clover to the
German nohleman at the Ocean House,
Newport, "wha, do ron think n it, Bar
orr "vcll. vas full mid enthusissticks
Mrs Glover. und neifer drinks dot style
vas possible. Do you know der name of
good shoemaker hat q hole init der
toe of my poot
job, my dear, " said bis wife, wreath.
"a in smiles, Il wish you had been at
church this morning Mr.. Goodwill was
very interesting; and when be prayed for
the absent ones" .'Weil, that accounts
ior il, then. haven't caught such
string Of fish for ayear as ! did this morn.
Ing"
A Scotch preacher. who found his
congregation going 10 sleep one Sunday
hcfore be had fairly begin, suddenly
stopped aud exclaimed, Brethren, It's nae
fair; gie a mon half chance. Wait till
81, along and then IL I'm nae worth lis.
icning To. gang to sleep. bu, dinnA gang
isiorc get commenced. Gle a mon
chance"
~ II il ,old Of New Hampshire man
that finding bumhlebee, one day, AS be
Was Ghlngling his barn. he tried 10 de
siray the insect with his Ratchet, but Gu,
the ends Of his thumb and finger, ieiiing
tie Inseot 90 unhartnei In one Of his alb
tiractsons be shlngled over his spare
Ratchet, aid eating small aperture in
the building 10 let little daylight in.
this man actually V. in wooden pane as
being economical and no, likely 10 lie
broienl He once nailed his left arm so
firmly bciwiIi two boards Of fence he
was putting up. that he had 10 call for
help 10 sci extracted from bis self-im-