The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1880-08-14

is any apartment IN TINS domlclle, cousin
Poyntz, that could be fitted up as a study
for my temporary use, it would greatly facil-
itate my intellectual occupation during my
soiourn in the suburbs Of this great city.
And must beg that you will keep the house
very still during the hours that | devote to
study"
Here my wife looked at me aghast think
ing Of little johnny and the baby.
"Never mind, my dear" remarked, sot-
to uoce, ave can easily get 'em boarded out
somewhere"
"And," went on the Rev. Mr.. Speakwell,
"I should esteem it a favor if horse ahd
buggy could be procured for my daily use
When going to Doctor Dosem, in the city, as
the motion Of the train disagrees with my
nervous system"
81 don't happen to own carriage" said
l. "But might buy one"
"Thank You, thank you cousin Poynt1,"
said Mr., speakDell, blandlys
"And If there is any other little thing you
should happen TO want" | added, "pray
don't be backward in mentioning it,"
ono, won't, cousin Poyntz," said Mr..
Speakwell, with the utmost gravity.
And l am bound TO cay that he kept his
word.
For three days I endured the swarm of
visitors which literally infested my home,
and then | made up my mind that patience
had ceased to be virtue.
"I'll put stop to this thing" said /.
came home one night with tragical
expression on my face.
"Katherine," ! said to my wife, "I am
ruined"
"WhatW cried all the company at once.
"Those shares in the Western Union, YOU
knowP" said |, shifting my forehead.
"Yes, dear" gasped poor Kitty.
"They have gone down." said I. "Not
worth penny"
"Oh, joint"
~ wish had taken your advice, and let
'ern alone" said I. "But, after all, it does
not matter much, as if had no friends"
| looked beamngly around at my wife's
relations. They returned the glance by the
blankest Of stares.
"If borrow two hundred dollars apiece
of all these dear kindred" said l. with OBJ
trusive cheerfulness, and request Uncle ST.
las to endorse my business notes"
al couldn't think Of such thing" inter.
rupted that gentleman.
II should be most happy to oblige," said
cousin Joab, "but l am quite out OF funds
at present"
"And l." said the Rev. Mr. Speakwell,
pushing back his chair, "must save what
little share | possess of the worlds filthy
lucre to pay my passage and that Of my
family back To Minnesota"
"Surely," cried |, "you would not 20
away and leave me in such pecuniary straits
as these"
The Rev. Mr.. speakwell buttoned up his
pockets significantly.
ut is every mans Business to look after
himself cousin Poyntz," said he; "and l
don't scruplc to say that 1t is downright
dishonesty for business man like yourself
to get into such financial difficulties.
And in fifteen minutes every cousin of
the lot had, upon some excuse or another,
vanished from the room, to pack and pre-
pare for immediate departure.
looked at my wife; my wife looked at
me. burst out laughing Kitty began to
"NIy dear" said l, otis an easier Job than
thought it would be. didn't know but
that it would be necessary for me to bring
the small pox in the house before | could
get rid of your relations
"But are we very poor, John? And must
we give up this dear little cottage? Oh,
how cruel it is Of cousin Joab, and Mr..
Speakweil, and Uncle Slas ard I'll of them,
not to help you. know Mariana Wilmer
ding has five thousand dollars that she
wants to put out at interest, for she told me
only yesterday, and"
"Yes, exactly" said I. "But probably
she doesn't regard me as very good invest
ment."
"After all have done for thernl" sobbed
my vif5.
"Relations are only human, my dear"
said l.
"John," said she, "will you tell me how
Loot ;,,t
stock? Because | would rather know the
worst at once"
"Lost?'" repeated l., looking up from my
newspaper, which | was reading ia Uncle
Silas' lavorite easy chair, now vacated for
the first time for many days. "Why, who
said had lost anything2"
"You did"
"EXcuse me, my dear; said nothing Of
the kind. | merely stated that the West
ern Union shares were not worth a penny.
Neither were they, to me, as / had sold out
all possessed week ago."
"Johnp
"Yes, my dear"
GLOW could your"
Every easily" said I, with latent smile. |
"My dear, think if your relatives had |
stayed another week should have commit |
tea suicide"
And you told that horrid story just to get
rid of them?"
81 made that unimpeachable statement |
with that precise intention"
"They t0ere rather trying" confessed Kit |
ty. "And think they might have helped |
you little when they thought you bank
rupt."
"They will not come visiting here again." !
said l, quietly.
And | was right. They did not.
THE CZAR's NODE OF LIFE.