davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

Peaches and kream will convert
emf :, man who is worth saving. The
peach has doun like that on a
maiden's cheek, and it amt half so
plezant to get onto the lips. Peach
brandy is made out of the peach, this
Ticker that has been called mellO, but
any ticker that / have tried will lay
out saint just sz fiat az it will a
sinner. The truth Of it's, there amt
no kind of ardent rum, l don't kare
how artless and gentle the name of il
liz, or how rich and mello you may
call it, but what will throw him who
wrassels with it, be he phool or be he
philosopher. There iz only one piece
of humanity that kan stand ardent
spirits, and he an injun, and he kant
stand it long enough to be civilized.
When peach brandy iz at fust made
it il az hot az streak ov lightning,
and az sudden. once drank about
q tea-speonful of it warm from the
still, and it was about twenty minutes
before could draw long breath i.
was az hot inside az a chimney on
fire, and thought it would certainly
break out blaze sumwhere, but it
didn't happen to. l went at once
and joined the Murphys.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

He came up n .I1t!c late. steppet
in without ringing, and strdinS soitI,
INTO the parlnr. Iropped into IN cas-,
chair with the carvlc>, grac" OF :;
youLu man who Is accustomed 10 the
programme. by Jovr,' he said t.,
the figure sitting in the dim pbseuritN
of the sofa. by Jove, | thought J
was never going tn see you aton'
again. Your mother never goes away
from the house nowadays; does she
Minnie p "Wcll, not amazingly fire.
quently.' cheerfully replied the ole
lady from the sofa. ''M'nnie's away
so much of the time now | have tI
stav in In the old hickory at The
end of the house the moping ow
complained to the moon much III 1t:
usual style, the katy''ids never SAM
more clearly, and the plaintivc cry c
the whip-poor-wll filled the nigh
with poetry, but he did not hear an'
of it all the same. "And, by George,
he said to a friend fifteen minute!
later, ''ifI didn't leave my hat on th'
piano and my cane in the hall, I'm
goat. Think of 'em? Forget 'em
Strike me blind if knew l had an,
clothes on at all. What l wanted
was fresh air, and / wanted abon
thirty acres of it, and mighty quick
| tOOi'
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

From the Louisville touricr-Journal.
Mr.. S. Park Baker, of Youngs-
town, N. Y, after having read in the
an account of the
Jackson dickinson duel, thus writes
to a friend in kentucky: There is
one feature about this duel with Dick
inson, however, that seems a little
peculiar, and that is that Gen. Jack
son, who was very spare man in his
person, should have been dressed in
a .oose-fittlng gown or coat. SO that
his antagonist could not readily tell
the location of his body. Dickinson
aimed right, and if Jackson's body
had been where Dickinson supposed
it was, and where. perhaps, the code
duello would say it ought to have
been, there is no just reason to doubt
that Gen. Jackson would at that time
have 'passed in his Checks" for the
ball from Dickinson pistol would
have struck his heart beyond any
doubt, according to the account of
the duel. Now, the criticism and
point | make in the character of
"Old Hickory in respect to this
duel is this: Having dressed him
self in a manner to deceive Dlckin-
son rs to the precise location Of his
(Jackson's) body, and having re
ceived Dickinson's bullet withou
any serious injury, it was not Il jus
and fair thing in Jackson atterwar'
| to take deliberate aim at Dickinson
provocation was on the part OF Dick
| inson which led to the duel, it seem
| to me that. having re-orted to wha
was then considered an honorahl
method of settling the difficulty, the
were each bound to give the othe
fair play, ard the onl y excuse or ,iusti
tication | can find for General Jack,
son for his deliberate and prcmed,-
tated killing OF Dickinson is the fact
that perhaps, upon general princI-
plies, Dickinson ought to have been
killed for slandering 50 upright and
estlmahle a woman as the wife oI
General Jackson. In reading an ac'
count Of this fight AIN reminded o.
the duel between john Randolph ant
kentucky's most iilustrious citizen
Henry Clay, in 1926, only the ternl
nation OF this duel WAS not so dlsas
trous as the former. aud vet IL nigh
have been if Mr. Clay had not, t.
some extent, been deceived as TO tt'
location or position Of Randolph
body, for It wa, stated by some On
that Mr.. Clay remarked. after TIL
duel WAS over, tia At he might as we'
shoot at a p;ir OF tong~ as al Kan
dolnh.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

Hannibal blood is at fever heat.
The great church scandal has con-
vulsed society there and pistols have
taken the place Of the gospel Of peace.
Thursday, little after IL O'Clock,
c. w. a. Cartridge, secretary of the
Congregational Church investigating
committee, met T. III. Bacon, brother
of one of the ladies whose name has
been prominent in the scandal, and
spat in his face, at the same time de-
nouncing him as scoundrel. Bacon
started back and Cartridge immsdi-
ately covered him with a revolver.
Bacon threw up his hands and said
he was unarmed. Cartilage told him
to arm himself and meet him at twenty
PAGES or across a handkerchief, or
he would make a spittoon OF
his face every time they met.
This begins to look bloody when
church officers are so much reused as
to make challenges to their oppo-
! meats.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19
ALL SORTS.

Dead locks-''Bangs."
Altogether too thin,-The ice.
The light wait champion-Etlison .
The last agony-Toothache at 3
q. m.
Greece is all right. The lard be
thanked.
1t is better to go out on 8 fly than
on lark.
It's a sharp rat that gnaws its own
fodder.
A century plant-The burial OF q
centenarian.
The new crop Of almanilcs is the
best-for year.
The present weather is very mild
and fog-giving.
A mares nest should be q valuable
adjunct to q stock farm.
Bob 1ngersoll first lecture1 on Hell,
then on Burns, now on Pain.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

The necessity Of strong govern
ment for certain purposes, and the
peculiar fitness of Gran. As the head
and front Of such government, have
never been more pointedly put before
the people than has been done by
Sharon the millionaire Republican
senator from Nevada, in the follow
ing:
Gen. Grant will be president with
out doubt, if he will accept. We
need a strong central government
the wealth of the country demands it.
Without capital and capitalists our
government would not be worth fig;
the capital of the country demands
protection. Its rights are ~ sacred
as the rights Of the paupers who arc
continually prating about the en-
croachments of capital and against
Capitalization.
We have tried Grant and we know
him to be the man for the place above
all others. He has nerve. As presi-
dent he would be commander-in-chlef
OF the army and navy, and when the
communistic tramps of the country
raise mobs to tear up railroad tracks
and to sack cities on the sham
cry of "bread or blood" he would
not hesitate one instant to turn grape
and canister loose upon them.
The wealth of the country has to
bear the burdens Of government and
should control it. The people are
becoming educated up to this theory
and the sooner this theory is recoe'
nized in the constitution and laws,
/. the better it will be for the people.
| Without bloodshed-and rivers ol
it-there will be nc political change
of administration the moneyed inter.
ests of the country, for self-preserva'
ton, must sustain the republican
party. Democratic success would be
bankruptcy to them. To avert hs0ol.
shed a strong central government
should be established a. socn - pos
sible.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19
John A. Hockaday.


General Heckaday is not unknown
to the people Of Missouri; though
still comparatively a young man, hav-
ing been for number of years prom
lnently before the people of the State.
His fine natural abilities, his scholar
ship and culture, his high legal at
tainments, his acknowledged skill as
9 financial and political economist,
his pleasant and popular manners,
his life long and answering democ-
racy, his purity aud integrity as a
man, together with his large and
varied experience in all matters which
pertain to the practical administration
of the State government in all its
branches, peculiarly fit him for the
high Office for which he is named.
His public life has been devoted
wholly and exclusively to State mat.
ters, and no man in Missouri is more
conversant with them or more fully
understands and appreciates the po'
litical and legislative wants of The
people of the State. For two years
he filled the Office of Attorney-Gen
eral with credit and ability, beins
during that time the legal adviser Q
all the departments of the State gov
ernment, and at the same time
member of he Board Of Inspectors Q
the State penitentiary, and Of tn
State Board Of Education, and hs
likewise at various times been a mem
Der of the boards of management {
a number of the different educations
, and charitable institutions of th
State. Gen. Hockaday is now
member of the State Senate from th
district, and is the chairman Of tt
, Judiciary Committee of that bod,
( the same position held by Governt
, Hardin when he was nominated Il
t Governor. He is likewise chairma
/ of the joint committee on Revision
and this position has given him pec'
+ liar opportunities for thoroughly Fl
!, miliarizing himself with the laws
e the State which as Governor he wou
r be called upon to execute.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19


Minister-HeIlo, Exchange.
Telephone Exchange-W ell?
Minister-Put me on the residence
Of Mrs. Duzenberry.
Exchange-All right fire away.
Minister-Hello, Mrs. Duzcnberry
Mrs. Duzenberry-Well?
Minister-Ask your daughter Ma
linda to step to the instrument.
Malinda-What's wanted?
Minister-Your aflianced, Mr.. AL.
gernon Smithkinson, is here anG
wishes to speak to you.
Malinda-Tell him for goodness
sake TO hurry.
Algernon-Malinda, dear, l find i
won't be convenient tor me to come
around this evening. Can't We hav,
the ceremony performed now?
Malinda-I suppose so. -
Minister (taking off his hat)-Ds
you, Algernon Smithkin son, taxi
MalindaDuzenberrytobe your weddet
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. until death d,
youpart!
AIgernon--I do.
Minister-Do you, Malinda Duzen
berry, ,takeAlgernonS IN thkinsontob
yourweddedhusbandforbetterforwors
tilldeathdoyoupart?
Malinda-I do.
Minister-ThenIpronounceyouma
andwife, ,andwhomG 0 d h a thjoinedto
getherletnomanputasunder. Maketh
mostofit, Tendollars, Good-day.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

Floating Down the Mississippi River on II
Flat Boat.

From the Memphis Ledger.
1t is little out of the usual order
to make bridal tour on Mississippi !
River flat boat, and it is not often
done. but now and then a spirit of
adventure strikes into the heart Of a
loving pair, and the excursion is
made. Last year, or the year before,
Capt. Epsy, of Rising Sun, Ind,
married a beautiful Ohio Valley belle,
fitted up real bridal chamber in ex-
quisite style, and regardless Of eX-
pense, started on voyage to the
Lower Mississippi, where the live oak
forests tower, and the fragrant orange
blossoms spread their odor upon the
breeze. The couple passed several
months in this way, and the time was
delightful for both. Yesterday an
other pair of bridal tourists went by
here, going south on q flat-boat.
They were also from Rising Sun, Ind,
short distance below Cincinnati, on
the Ohio, and the boat was q month
out from her starting point, the pilot
being Capt. Thomas, and the same
who steered the Epsy boat south last
season. 1t was the silver bridal trip
Of Capt. and Mrs. William Hemphill,
of Rising sun, a couple well off in
worldly goods, and whose residence is
the finest and most attracting in Ris-
) ing Sun. The gardens and groves in
which their house is situated occupy
10 acres, all in a high state of culture
and carefully kept. In addition, the
Captain owns a large and productive
farm near by, He has been fat-boat
ing for the past thirty-four years, ant
this is the first time Mrs. Hemphil
ever made q trip from home. Thei
children are all grown but one, a Lac
OF IA, who accompanies his parent
on the voyage. Several of the chill
dren are married, and all are well-to
do. The boat upon which Capt
, and Mrs. Hemphill are floating dow
the river contains 5000 bushels G
: corn for distribution and sale amon
: sugar plantations in Louisiana. A
I, one end of the craft is neatly fitte
u cabin, where {. state-room is comfort
J ably fitted for the lady and he
c spouse. She enjoys the novel voyage
n she says, and will not in the futur
? allow her husband to make othe
q trading trips on the river unless b
takes her along.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19
TACKLING THE WRONG TOM CAT.

man he owned a terrier dorg-
bob-tailed, onery cuss,
And that there pnrp got that there man
In many an ugly muss;
For the man was on his muscle,
And the dorg was on his bite
so TO kick that dorg- -goned animile
Was sure to raise a fight.
woman owned Thomas cat
That fit at fifteen pounds
And other eats got up and slid
When that there cat was round.
The man and his dorg came along one day,
Where the woman She did dwell
And the purp he growled ferociousy
Then went for that cat pcl-mell.
He tried to chaw the neck of the cat
But the cat he wouldn't he cliawed
So he lit on the back of that there dorg,
And bit and clawed and clawcd
Oh the HAIR it flew and the purp he youled
As the claws went into his hide,
And chunks of flesh were peeled from his side ::
Then he tiummixed, and kicked, and died.
The man he ripped. and cursed, and swore
As he gathered big brick bat,
| That he be burned essentially
| If he didn't kill that cat
But the old woman said she'd be blessed if he did
| And snatchcd up an Old shot gun
| Which she fired and peppered his diaphragm
| With bird shot number oae.
| The toted him on a window blind,
| And the doctor cured him up;
| But he was never known to fight again.
| Or own another purp.
Folks may up their at this ere rhyme:
|" don't care a cIlsS for that
| All want to show is. that fighting dorgs
| May tackle the wrong Tom cat.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19
BOOK & JOB PRINTING
ALL KINDS OF JOB PRINTING
EXECUTED IN THE
LATEST AND BEST STYLE
AND AT THE
LOWEST LIVING RATES.
We GUARANTEE FIasg.oIAss WORK.
TEXTBOOKS.


-
The textbook question is becom-
ing serious one. Under the law .
condition of things is growing up, in
finitely worse than the old evil of
frequent changes and additional cost.
In 1875, when the law first went into
operation, l pointed out most of its
glaring defects and urged amend
ments. These recommendations
were repeated in 1877, and again in
1879, but the book agents, who were
pleased with the advantages this law
gives them, we're promptly on hand
and defeated the proposed changes.
The evils flowing from the law are
three fold. First, the war Of book
factions unduly excites communities
and causes them to imagine that their
dearest rights and liberties are about
to be wrested from them. This pro-
duces discomfort, and departs faction
with the public school system. Sec-
ondy, the influence Of the persuasive
means adopted to secure the spoils,
in the selection for five years, is de-
moralizing and corrupting in the ex-
treme. Bribery, direct and indirect,
with liberal hand sowed the seeds in
the contest through which we have
just passed, which will produce q
luxuriant harvest hereafter. Third,
the strife of book concerns debases
the whole subject of education in
many minds to one exclusively of
dollars and cents, and its ending
leaves bitterness and divisions, from
which no one reaps any advantage,
except the victorious book-house,
that paid to secure results. As ]
view this subject, the tendency oi
the present law is evil, with scarcely
a redeeming feature and most Ger.
tainly unattended with adequate com
pensation.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

1t may be all right, but I've railroad.
cd too long to understand it."
''Did You try the Methodists,' I
sald.
CHOW, you're shouting,'' he said !
eh? Fast time and plenty of passen-
gers. Engines carry a power of
steam and don't you forget it. Lively
road, when the conductor shouts
'all aboard you can hear him at the
next station. Every train lamp
shines like headlight. Stop-over
checks given on all through tickets
passenger can drop off the train as
often as lie likes, do the station two
or three days, and hop OF the next
revival train that comes laundering
along. Good, whole-souled, COM
panionable conductors; amt road
IN the whole country where the pas
sengers feel more at home. No pass
es; every passenger pays full tariff
rates for Lis ticket. Wesleyanhouse
r-brake on all trains, too; pretty
safe road, but l didn't ride over it
yesterday
"Maybe you went to the congrega-
tional church?'' 1 said.
popular road,' said the brake
man, ian old road, too; one of the
Oldest in the country. Good road
bed and comfortable cars. Well
managed road, too, directors don't t
interfere with division superinten-
dents and train orders. Roads s
, mighty popular, but its pretty indie
pendent. too. See, didn't one of the
superintendent down East discon-
tinue one of the Oldest stations on
this line two or three years ago:
But its mighty pleasant road tc
: travel on Always has had splen-
diu class of passengers.
''Perhaps you tried the Baptist!
. 1 guessed once more.
, ''Ah, ha,'' said the brakeman
"she's daisy, isn't she? Rivel
p road beautiful curves sweep arounC
[ anything to keep close to the river
q but It's all steel rail and rock ballas
single track all the way, and not :
. side-track from the round-hOu3e t,
the terminus. Takes a heap of waite
: to run through double tanks at eve
+ ry station, and there isn't an engin
+ in the shops that can pull pound o
l. run a mile in less than two gauges
: But it runs through a beautiful coun
Il try; these river roads always do
Y river on one side and hills on tn
e other, and its steady climb up tn
l. grade all the way till the run end
10 where the fountain head of the rive
= begins. Yes, sir, I'll take the rive
road every time for lovely trip, sur
connections and good time and q
q; prairie dust blowing in at the wiz
at dow. And yesterday, when the COZ
ductor came around for the .icke
with little basket punch, l didn
I ask him to pass me, but l paid N
fare like i little man-twenty-fi,
to cents for an hours run, and lit
Ii. concert by the passengers throwe
an in. | tell you, Pilgrim, you tai
O. river road when you want to"
,u But just here the long whistle fro
We the engine announced Il station, al
,e the brakeman hurried to the do
b, saying:
"Zionville, This train makes l
stops between here and Indianap
all lis,''
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19
wOMAN's NERVE.
A Tall Lady Proves Her Courage to q Small
Reporter.
From the Virginia City Cronicie.

From the Virginia City Croncie.
A tall lady with saturnine coun-
tenance came into the Chronicle Office
to-day and demanded of one of the
reporters if Virginia offered a good
field for series Of a dozen lectures
on woman suffrage.
81 don't think the Comstockers
have thought much about female suf-
frage,' replied the reporter frankly.
Don't say female" said the tall
lady sharply.
"Why not?' asked the reporter, in
innocent surprise.
''Because, sir, term that is used
to describe sex in animals should not
be applied to women"
The reporter admitted, in great
humiliation, that the point was we'll
taken, and looked up in some alarm
at the severe countenance Of the lady,
who was a head taller than himself
and manifestly able TO thrash him in
the interest of progress, if so disposed.
The stern countenance softened some
what at the signs of confessed inferi-
ority, however, and the lady con-
| tinued:
"The cause of woman is the cause
of humanity. The cause of humanity
embraces all progress. Why, then,
should the people of Virginia be in
different to woman?"
"They're not!" cried the small re.
porter hastily. "Far from it. Woman
is the boss in this camp. Everything
she wants she gets, and not one in s
hundred has to do lick Of work. -
"Mere toys!' said the tall one
with deep scorn. "Playthings for al
idle hour. You cover woman witt
silks and gauds and sink her sou
into insigniicance by circumscribine
her sphere and allowing her no mis-
sion in life
"Well," admitted the small re
porter, "that's about the way we looi
at it up here, that's fact. Womei
haven't got the nerve to rastle TO
!, themselves like men,
= 'NER-R-R-vE!" {.
She uttered this word III 4 terribl
: tone, so terrific that the small repor
r ter half rose from his chair.
"Nerve! What is there requirin,
nerve that you do that L am incspabl
; off,"
: ''No offense, madam, no offense
e L meant nothing personal, 1 assur
3 YOU"
+ "Am l not stronger than your
+ she demanded, scorning the apology
e "Am 1 not gifted with as great
0 brain? Why do you despise my sex
! We can bear more pain, and arr
+ therefore, your superiors in courage.
8 The small reporter was gazing Il,
t edly at dark corner of the room
V and made no answer.
e "Nerve, indeed!" continued tt
Ie tall lady, ''why, women have infinit
d ly more nerve than men. Only we
.e terday / saw woman"
"That's the biggest rat l ever sa
N in the office" said the small reporte
d staring ,ntently at the darker corne
Or The screams that rent the s
brought in all the printers and sever
10 citizens from the street. When th
o. arrived the tall woman was standing
a chair with one hand covering /
ewes and the other convuisiv.
clutching at her skirts as she gather
them close around her.
The small reporter wisely took s
vantage of the crowd to slip ont, a
he telegraphed from Gold Hill Il
Ter he was going down to Carson to VIC
'pi up big item.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

We give below a brief extract from
each of two famous orations, one writ
tan by St. Paul, the other spoken by
Robt. Ingersoll. The first is eighteen
centuries old; it is more beautiful
and more beloved with every year.
The second is about one year old and
is becoming more disgusting every
day of It's existence. Whether it will
live eighteen hundred years or not is
a question easily answered.
PAUL.
Behold. I show you a mystery;
We shall not all sleep, but We shall
all be changed.
In moment, in the twinkling of
an eye, at the last trump; for the last
trumpet shall sound, and the dead
shall be raised lncorruptible, and We
shall be changed.
For this corruptible must put on
interruption, and this mortal must
put on immortality.
So when this corruptible shall have
put on interruption, and this mortal
shall have put on immortality, then
shall be brought to pass the saying
that is written, Death is swallowed up
in victory.
| o Death, where is thy sting? o
Grave, where is thy victory?
/ The sting of death is sin, and the
strength of sin is the law.
But thanks be to God, which giveth
! US the victory through our Lord
Jesus Christ.
1 Life is narrow vale; we strive in
vain to look beyond the heights; we
!. cry aloud, and the only answer is the
i echo of our wailing cry. From the
voiceless lips Of the unreplying dead
< there comes no word, but, in the
night of death, Hope sees star, and
listening love can hear the rustic of 6
wing. He who sleeps here wher
, dying, mistaking the approach O
= death for the return of health, whis
pered, with the latest breath, 81 an
better now." Let US believe, in spit,
, of doubts and dogmas, in spite o
fears end tears, that these dear word
are true of all the countless dead.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

The wise man telletA his love, but
the foolish f1.r writeth it in letter.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

A girl who has just acquired beau
thinks she is lap ahead of her beau
less friends in the matrimonial race.
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

Old-time chsmpagne--A piece OF
creased paper pasted over the window
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

A divorce court conundrum: what
is the difference between husband
and wife?
Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-02-19

As Virginia was 10 Presidents, 10
il Ohio to candi dates.