West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1880-06-26


Miss Brown may be the most charming
tunately, so far as you and other male
dancers are concerned, she Is desper-
ately enamored of Mr.. Black. Conse-
quently, the only individual with whom
she cares to dance Is the fortunate Mr..
Black. You may see her looking AT
him with radiant face, whispering into
his ear, and showing the keenest APP
probation of everything that he says.
You may also notice that she allows
him TO clasp her a little more tightly
than is absolutely necessary, and that
she leans on him for support more
heavily than she is really called on TO
do. 1t is easy to perceive that she
would dance with him all night if IL
were not for the wholesome restraining
influences of etiquette, even though
she may not be absolutely engaged"
TO him. When, however, she Is con-
strained TO resign herself to your
clutches, her demeanor undergoes a
wonderful transformation. The radi-
ance vanishes from her countenance
and her manner become frigld, espes-
cially Ii you evince the least desire to be
frien dly and confidentially CONVERSE
tional with her. She holds you at arms
length, and, probably, processes to be
weary before she has gone more than
twice round the room. She forgets
that with lucky Mr.. Black she is able
to keep up from the beginning to the end
of long waltz, but you do not, and
your humiliation is. therefore, all the
more complete. In case you should
have some excuse for not thinking that
you are regarded as bore, she listens
to what you have to say with dis ralnt
air, and receives your neatest things In
grim silence. When you fancy that
you have said something smart, she viii
crush you by rouslng herself, as if from
a reverle, and saying, evidently in re-
ference to the law of politeness, ooh!
beg your pardon, Mr.. So-and-So, be-
lieve you said something; what was it?''
You reflect that she will not break her
heart If you refrain from telling her
what 1t was, and you are right. But
her behavior is very hard on you for
to have to tell joke twice over is very
much like explaining point of wit
ticism on which you particularly pride
yourself.
Having escaped from the hands of
Miss Brown, you may possible be hand
ed over to the tender mercies of Miss
Green. Now Miss Green prides her
self upon the strength of her character
and the power her mind She would
have you believe that she has soul
above the conventional twaddle of the
drawing-room, and is able to talk to
men on their pet subjects. so she will
ask your opinion of metaphysical and
philosophical works of which you may
not even have heard the names, and
arch her eyebrows In dsdaiu as you
FOUNDER about in a quagmire of diff
Guilty and indicate your own lack of
information. If you venture to pay
her a compliment she will frown, but
II you ask her what are her daily amuse-
ments she will smile, for she then will
be able to declare that she loves read
ing German and Greek, or tackling the
theory of evolution as pronounced by
Her bert Spencer. Under proper treat
ment she will lead you to understand
that sne Is ashamed of the frivolity and
empty-headedness displayed by the
majority of her sex, and deeply feels
the stigma which is undeservedly cast
upon herself in consequence of their
misdeeds. The results of your efforts
to entertain her is, nine times out of
ten, that you are m lde to feel exceed
ing'y small.
But, perhaps, the greatest trial which
one has to endure is MISS LackadalsIcaI.
She Is of sentimental turn OF mind.
and thinks of little except sweethearts.
She is ready to dance through an eve
ming, almost without a break. regard
less of the aching OF her partners and
the sweat upon her partners brows.
She never dreams that she is heavy.
She certainly does her best to be amla-
Die. You may tell her that the moon
Is made Of green cheese, and she will
not contradict you. Indeed, she will
smile and nod her head, as she might
be expected TO do If you were retailing
gospel truth. But, while she ~ ready
10 endorse everything which you have
10 say, she has very little to talk about
on her own account. After supper IL
Is true, she may attempt to rally YOU
about your hirtations. But, there Is
not mnch 'gO" in her chat, and YOU
nave an impression that she wouId-be
glad If you would make love 70 her
You have an idea that she could upon
very slight prOYoCation, constitute her
SELF the victim Of an unrequited attach
ment. When you begin operations. 40
Tar as she is concerned, you may feel
amiable aud be full Of spirits. Il.
somehow or other, she "dries Won no -
AT The end Of the first figure Of the
quadrille, having exhausted the wealth
er, the common affection for dancing
and such inspiring topics, you come to
stop and wonder what in the name Of
goodness you are 10 say next. You
begin 20 think that after all. YOU are
the greater por lion Of a fool. and are
concentrating the melancholy fact 10
your partner. But you need not hui
initiate yourself She Is prepared %
fan