Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1880-07-04
Franks Of Telephones.

cloud; mo blessing without a bother. All
great inventions for the benefit or I'M
provement of mankind are accompanied.
by tram OF disasters With the intro
duction of locomotives came railway &C
cidents, collisions track, jumping'bridge-
breaking and host of minor casualties.
Complicated machinery for manufactur
ing purposes has been swelling the death
and accident list Of the country ever since
It's inception, and the marvellous triumphs
in agricultural implements are fast pro-
viding for US one-legged, one-armed, fin
gerless, toeless and otherwise mutulated
yeomanry. The use of the telephone in
San Francisco has been attended by a
series of ludicrous, EN- barrassing and start
ling complications. The hundreds of
wires, forming an aerial network above
the city, sometimes become strangely con-
fused and tangled, to the bewilderment
and amusement of the human beings at
their various termini.
A prominent educational official whose
Office is on Samsone street, has been some
what troubled by the yagaries of his tele-
phone wire,whlch has, during the late
stormy weather acquired a strange facul-
ty for hobnobbIng with all sorts of un-
desired and undesirable acquaintance,
or carrying stream of gossip to Its own
er's ears.
SIS Mr.. -, member of the School
Board, there?'' slowly and deliberately
asks the owner.
A muttered answer is constructed into
a favorable response.
sDo you know Miss s., teacher
in the schools, recently thrown out by a
consolidation of classes? She has first
class certificate, and also certificate OF
approval
Genuine high-stepper; brown coat?"
comes the singular query.
"She has dignified gait, and now you
speak oft, think she wore a brown cloak.
But think our language-excuse me
somewhat inappropriate. She was in here
this morning, and I think she deserves
the first vacancy
"She'll beat them all and no mistake"
81 think you are wrong. She certain
ly has reputation for good discipline,
but hardly think she would resort to
corporal punishment except in a case of
extreme necessity"
"And, by the way, Blikins, those races
at Sacramento next week'-comes more
distinctly to the ears of the bewildered
gentleman, who begins to suspect that he
has been interrupting a conversation be-
tween two gentlemen of jockeyish
procliyities.
A signal reaches the Office of a well
known physician.
my DEAR" comes musical voice ov-
er the wire, which he at once recognizes
as his wife's, "meet me at the Oakland
boat at twelve o'clock. We must be on
the other side at quarter to one, with
out fail" The doctor was just starting
out for an important round of visits, but
this peremptory summons was not to be
disregarded. There was little time to
spare. Giving some hasty directions to his
assistant he spun away to the ferry. The
lady he sought did not make her appear
ance. When the whistle had sounded
and the boat slowly receded with the
last passenger on board, sudden, jealous
suspicion seized him. Could it be posi-
BILE that his wife had intended the mess
age for some other man, that they had
eluded his observation! IL tumult of
dread he drove speedily home. IF she
were gone then there would be some foun-
dat1on for his suspicious He burst into
the house and fastened to his wife's room.
A grieved and anxious face met him on
the threshold.
90, my dear, am so glad you have
come. Baby is having such terrible time
with that eye-tooth. He has been scream
ing the whole forenoon
didn't you speak to me through the
the telephone."
81? No: baby has not been out OF my
arms since you left. O., dear, perhaps 1t
was some of your lady friends whom
you mistook for me-
The arch, laughing glance which she
gave him, with smile of wifely t,ust,
pierced his heart like dagger. He bur
ried the.secret of his own suspicion in
his guilty breast, and drowned his re-
morse in alternating the sufferings of his
little son.
The telephone itself is not at fault. It
is man who is fallible, rash, thoughtless,
disposed to speak without consideration,
and jump at conclusions. The educating
influence of telephone practice in devel-
oping the traits of forethought and eau.
ton is no slight factor in its utility and
beneficial effect upon mankind. Some
experienced telephone operators, sad
dened and chastened by months of blum
dering, become wise and wary. When
they desire to communicate with friend
they open the conversation in crafty,
willy manner parley procrastinate until
they become convinced that there is no
question as to the identity of the speak
er at the other extremity of the
wire with the person called, and not I'M
til then plunge into the business with
assurance. When call comes to them
over the wire, and gong-like bell sounds
its notes of warning, they approach it
with the same caution exhibited by any
army advancing to meet an enemy in an
unknown country. Then a system of
cross-questioning is carried on, sometimes
very amusing to disinterested listener.
In the Office of a prominent lawyer on
California street, a gentleman noted for
his sagacity and keenness, specimen
eoona of fhia hind onourred tho