Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1880-01-02
Jim Jams.
Have YOU anYthing late from tt

of Bangor? 1t is .rumored that some
thing has happened down there. The
Governor of that State remarked to the.
Governor Of Louisiana" or words to that
effect.
Itwas "blosted" atmospherical in these
parts on Christmas, so much so in fact,
that we were almost deferred from at
tending diyine worship ION that oeca-
sion.'
We observed that Hon. j. V. Brewer,
of St. Cloud, was in townYone evening
recently, attending a social gathering of
the Masonic fraternity at neighbor Tin
gle's. But We ask suspension Of public
opinion until the facts can be ascertain
ed. 1t is neither safe nor just to judge
a man entirely by his countenance, and
Brewer mag not be the man who muir
dered Morgan, after all.
John Wetzel has had more babies and
prettier ones, within the past few days
than any young man of our acquaint-
ance. But-the viNain! He had them
nearly all hung-on the Christmastree.
The whiskey in thiscountry has, of late,
been transported in baskets. Rhodes
alcohol was still jugable last accounts.
General Winfield Scott Hancock is the
only Democrat in the United States that
could be elected President in 1880; and
if there is any other one that owght to be
elected, he has not been visible to the
naked eye during the past two or three
years.
We were awful glad to hear that broth
er Hartley, of the Brainerd Tribune, had
that worm snatched out of him. We
have thought for years that it would be
pleasant to have Hartley, we mean
dine with us some time, if we could
only afford it.
Charley Simmons has found some
ducks in this vicinity, that arc not
frozen in," and he proposes to remain
here until spring and see that they don't
''get away"
Roll Worthington don't like the breed
of oysters we have in this country. He
says those they raise in Pike county, ILL.,,
are not only great deal sooner and bet
ter, but the cans grow much larger and
the oysters in them are not near so sell
dom as~they are in the Minnesota variety.
Dave Goulet is organizing aclass in
music. The keys in which they will
practice, will be turnkey, turkey and
donkey And there is where Dave is
making mistake. If he would include
whis-key, we would guarantee him the
largest class that ever mingled their
sweet voices on this continent.
LATER-The music class is busted |
Dave has Joined T ,meroy's Ainstreas.
And now man can hang his legs out /
at the window when he lays him down
to rest at night, with impunity. The
snakes are friendly.
Our worthy fellow-citizen, Rheubenac-
ker Heinspikle, says: "Better we don't
dem roalrAid mans dirty-five tousand
dollars to built dot roalraid what we
don't got some use for, aint she?" We
think she is,
ELL" Brown, Esq, of Minneapolis,
was in town one evening recently, and,
at the earnest solicitation Of the boys, at
tended social dance at Mr.. Porter's.
He is not much on the dance, but can
eat apple-pie in four different languages,
and outtalk Porter with one hand tied
behind him.
Our Jim, Jim Blaine, of Maine" once
upon a time remarked: There is no
constitutional authority for going behind
the returns" With just what degree OF
enthusiasm Jimmy now welcomes his
chickens home to roost, we are not fully
advised.
We will esteem it a great favor if
some fellow who knows, will answer this
conundrum: If railroad companyis so
cheap that it can be bought for thirty
five thousand dollars to build railroad
from Sauk Centre to Lake Superior,
about what will be its price for building
one from the top of Hole-in-the-D Days
Bluff to the moon? We think the query
pertinent for the reason that both of these
lines will doubtless be built at about the
same time, and by the same company.
jim JAM JUNIOR.