The Brookhaven ledger., 1880-08-05
! MSS, THU uRsDAY. AUGUST ). .s1sSO..

6lution, for such we've the doctor ssol7,
ders, as ], had never previously ta71I 4
ken morphine, in any way; it is to
| this precantion I probably owe my
life. Then, according to instruc-
ton, l pinched up piece ofthe calf
of my leg tightly between the finger
and thumb Of my left hand, inserted
1.-The point Of the tube under the skin
with a dexte-ity which l remember
Ipleased me at the time, as Thought.
j what skillful surgeon might have
lbeen lost to suffering humanity by
the untoward circumstances of my
|early life, and gently introduced in
Ito nv system the magic fluid which
was to relieve me of all my suffer
ling. 1t did it with vengeance, and
with unexpected rapidity, too.
| The first sensation was OF some-
thing not belonging to me craving
under my skin, and mounting rapid
Ily up my backbone, spreading thence
all over my body rs it went. This
was not at all painful to me, nor was
I alarmed by it; for, though certain
lv very peculiar, l took it all at first
as part of the programme, and trou-
bled myself no more about it than so
fac as to hastily unlock the door,
thinking, "There is no telling how
llong I shall sleep, and if l don't
open the door ia the morning they
will be frightened to death
By this time the crawling feeling
had mounted to the back ofmy neck
could trace it as it moved; my
limbs were beglning 20 refuse to
serve me; I was obliged to totter to
the bed without putting out my
light, for, though not the least sleep
", should have fallen had | not help
ed myself by chairs and table. There
I lay, eyes wide open, senses all
alive, quite out of pain, but no idea
of going to sleep. When the crawl
ing thing, whatever it was, reached
the back of my head, it seemed to
give slight blow to that part, and
Immediately I lost all power over
nv limbs. Still I retained perfect
consciousness. I heard the move
ments going on in different pats OF
the house. / saw the moon rise a1d
peer in at one Of the windows, end
I remembered a slight feeling of al
Inovance that, about midnight. The
light would come in through anoV1-
er window, the curtain of which |
had neglected to pull down. + |
had seen burglars breaking into the
room, could not have moved or
spoken. | was not troubled aboCt
this, however, nor much about any
thing else on earth. / watched my
symptoms with care and interest,
and felt certain 1 was going to sleep.
though what was coming next
could not even guess The only
feeling of concern aboHt anything
that remember was thought that
rose in my mind Ike this:
"What a horrible fuss Effie viii
make when she finds me in this
state"
Even this did not trouble me
much, for it really did not seem to
be any business of nine. Bv de
! grees, but so slowly as to be hardly
noticeable. I lost all conciousnes of
nv ext-emities. At first, though |
could not control them, / was quite
aware tnao | had hands and feet
now l seemed TO lose them, as from
|sensiole contact with a foreign body
more into myself. This peculiar
loss of conciousness extended veg
gradually up my limbs. Still l had
my senses; my eyes were open, |
could see everything around me, l
could hear as well as eyer, and my
mind was clear and pecfectly tran
|quil. l was neither frightened, nor
|.agitated, nor anxious, nor, l must
confess, was l impressad with any
peculiar solemnity attaching to the
occasion. Perhaps this was owing
to my habitual matter of fact dispo-
s;sion. l seemed to myself just as
complete without my arms and legs
as when l had them.
Little by little l lost my body,
and with equal indifference. Wheth
e. my heacss ceased to beat and my
lungs to breathe at :h;s time | can
not tell you for I had no means of
knowing but, if they did, did not
seem to n IS them. Sool / was gone
up to my neck. Thee, and not till
then, my senses began to grow dim.
First. my sight, not as by the clos
ing of my eyes, brt objects disap-
peaced, leaving only the impression
of light upon the eye; then thst, too,
faded, and finally no consciousness
of the organ remained. My hearing
was still witch me, or l with it,
whichever you prefer to say. Soon
it, too, left me. Head, face, body,
senses, all seemed gone-evecything
except feeling of weight in my
tongue and ror1d spot in the back
of my head, where | had previously
felt the blow. Then my tongue
went, and the round spot was all
that was left; yet this seemed just
as absolutely and completely me as
ever my body had been.
This state continued apparently
a long while, during which l remem-
Der wondering what Dr. S. would
: say when he saw me, hoping he
would not meet with any annoyance
. about his share of the transaction.
= AS to anxiety about worldly or 9TH
: er afa::-rs, fear for the future, memo
! ry iastantaneously flashing before
me the events OF my whole life down
. to the minutest particulars-as we
: are told 1t sometimes does-I had
no such experience, and admit /
, , cannot now contemplate the state !
: : was in with anything like the com
: posure / felt at the time, though ]
distinctly thought to myself, "This
. is certainly the last" yet it was
with something of relief at it's being
SO well over.
el Even that consciousness of exis-
tence went, and there was nothing
! lin place of it for l know not how
. long. The whole affair from the
! first injection Of the morphine tc
:. ~ ,nyn rn1ata losa of eoncihi1itv