The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1867-188?, 1880-11-04
dangling at his hip, 'but will fetch
him the next time.o


collection the carrier met the secretary
at his post, and three pamphlets were
ranged in q row, sticking in the NOR
tise, ready to be pounded clear inside
as soon as there was room. No time
was wasted in conversation, but the
Government and the corporation
buckled to work in dead earnest. The
carrier scraped the pamphlets out until
they sounded like tin roof pulling off
in a cyclone, and the secretary ratified
them in like a hailstorm on top of q
railroad car. Both parties were conf
dent. Carrier X. was proudly flushed
with his signal victory of the morning,
and the secretary was determined to
make no mistake this time.
"All outr' shouted the carrier.
"Two inm calmly replied the secre-
tary, putting them there. "You can't
go away and leave mail in the box that
was placed there before your hand vas
out"
And SO they kept it. Work as he
would the carrier always heard or felt
another pamphlet drop in as he with
drew his hand with the last one. 1t
was evident that victory had forsaken
the eagles of the Government and was
perched upon the banners of the corpo-
ration.
Cant take any more anyhow" said
the carrier, "pouch is full"
"All right" replied the secretary.
"Go to the office and discharge your
cargo and I'll have the box loaded up
by the time you can get back. Here.
take these along in your hands as your 9
going that way, that's good fellow"
and the secretary piled deckload upon
the carrier, who, in a maze of astonish-
ment at his adversary's GOODNESS, offered
no objection.
Well, SO the thing went on. At every
collection the carrier found the secre-
tary there. Sometimes he changed his
route and came to that box last, but if
the secretary wasn't there at the time
he came along before the box could be
emptied, and formed his line and waded
right into the fight on the double quick,
without throwing out a single skirmish-
or. At last, after the carrier had car
ried away about 4, 800 pamphlets, he Of
fered to compromise. He would hire
an express wagon. If the secretary
would pay for it. This proposition was
declined and the flag of truce ordered
bore away nearly 5, 1000 more pamphlets,
ohu 1shCo INV AAAohS ehSAS "SAS
to come.
"About 71,0O0," the secretary said.
The carrier sighed, emptied the box
several times until he got his pouch so
full he couldn't shut down the fiap, and
worked the rest of his route while the
secretary was at his supper. He kept
along until he carried about 2, 500 more
to the Office, and then he made another
proposition.
If the secretary would 60 and ask
would bring it to the assurance office,
then he would help load on the mail,
and would pull the cart if the Secretary
would push.
The secretary took the proposition
under consideration for three days, in
the meanwhile industriously work
ing off the pamphlets on Carrier Xi
then he assented to the first three
clauses of the proposition, in regard to
borrowing, bringing and loading the
hand-cart, but only on condition that
the carrier should pull the load to the
Office, while the secretary sat aloft on
the mail bags and rode carrying a ban
ner with the inscriptions:
"Rideo."
Which means. he told the carrier, "l
ride" (But it doesn't; it's funnier
than that.
Carrier. X Indignantly rejected this
modified proposition, slammed the door
shut, locked it on a box half full of the
precious pamphlets, and, forgetting his
dignity as an officer of tho United
States Government, told the secretary
to go to thunder.
The secretary did so. He went and
thundered at the door of the postmas-
ter's private room and reported the
carrier for willful neglect in refusing to
take out the contents of mail box num-
Der blankety- blank. on route number
oughty-ought.
The wearied postmaster, who had
heard both sided of the controversy a
thousand times, forwarded q concise
report of the matter to the Postmaster
General, and asked for instructions.
Pending the decision of the case and
the transmission of instructions by the
Department., Carrier X was ordered by
the postmaster to omit box number
blankety blank from his collections
from Monday to Saturday. inclusive,
taking a collection from that box only
ON Sunday morning, when the secre-
tary would be at church.
The day after this order went into
effect Carrier x was amazed and indig-
naut at discovering the very next box
on his route loaded to the muzzle with
the hateful pamphlets. So was the
next one. and the one after that, and
the one after that again, and every last
box on his route. All loaded full, and
final pamphlets driven in to the head,
so to.speak, with the terrible club, eff
fectually "spiking' the boxes. Around
every box stood wrathful people, hold
ing letters in their hands, being unable
to get their epistolary correspondence
into the boxes. These people. who
were mostly women, soundly rated and
scolded Carrier X because his enemies
had loaded the boxes. Five times dur
ing that collection did Carrier X have
to return to the Office and unload. And
in the afternoon it was the same way,
and he learned how Secretary
Stiehlpen was driving over his route
with q buggy full of tie-sacks. Once
he met the secretary, who gave him
good-day, and blandly said if the tie
sacks didn't take up all the room he
would give him lift. To which Carrier
X, earnestly replied, if the secretary
would Just step out on the sidewalk he,
Carrier X, would give him, Secretary
Stiehlpen, q lift that would make him
think the man in the moon had dropped
an old-style overland California brass
lock on him. But the secretary, who
never lost his temper, said he had six
more boxes to load up yet. and he had
no time to fool away.
And so the war goes on, and the De-
partment will probably have to send a
Commission out to Burlington. People
on route oughty-ought have to waylay
Carrier X and hand him their letters,
because the boxes are kept full by the
secretary. Sometimes the secretary,
in his zeal, or through his Ignorance OF
the postal boundaries of the city, gets
over into other routes, and other carriers
come wailing and protesting back to the
post-office. laden down with the valu-
able pamphlets. At one time, the local