Morning journal and courier., 1880-04-20
THE FREEDOM OF THE PRESS.

Put no fuIsome compliments on my tomb stone, ,' said Wag. Don't give m any epi- taGy."
 Oleomargarine manufacturers should put in & little hair for the sake of aiding the imita- tion.-Cineinnati Gazette.
 '"Tea table topics of the Syracuse Hera Id faintly complains because there Is no clause in the game laws to prevent house hunting.
 A gentleman finding his whiskey punch a little too hot, blew 1t with his breath to cool it. Blowing your own horn, see," said his oomrade.
 The reason that Oarwin's missing link" is 80 hard to find, says the scientific editor of the New Orleans Times. is because dead men tell no tails.
 ''She never told her love"-because the young man, anticipating something of the kind, hasn't called to see her since leap year opened. d.-Norristown Herald
 Commissioner Le Due is experimenting with Q new breed of chickens that will give milk. If he succeeds, the present Administration will go out in 8 blazs of glorys-Philadelph Chronicle Herald.
 contemporary contains long article en- titled the Effect of Smoking on Boys" It is not right to smoke on boys. It imparts 6 disagreeable odor to their clothes, and when they go home they arouse suspicious in the minds of their mothers which are difficult to eradicate The effect of smoking on some boys would be rock hurled at the head Of the snoker.-Norristown Herald.
 After all," remarked the young man, skimming lightly over the gravel walk in the general direction Of the front gate, "after all, what boots 1t r And the u4uscular look ing old gentleman at the top of the porch steps with his spectaoles jostled little crook ed says that if the young man himself didn't know, he didn't know anybody in that town ship that Burlington HaBkeye.
 If woman gets the ballot, of course she'll want to be judge of the election. When it comes to this, the patriotic American may well shudder, for our boasted liberties will go to ruin, and our elective franchise become 8 mockery corruption will rear it's head in tri- umph, and the Goddess of Liberty will allow her bangs to fall down OCT her weeping eyes For anybody can foresee that while the fair judges are inspecting the spring or fall cos tunes Of the voters, ballot box suffers vii boldly ply their trade and subvert the will of suffering people. Oh, country, we tremhIe for thy safety l-Cit4cinnati Gazette.
 Victoria-Let our Lord of Bea0onsfeId ap- proach. Beaconsfeld, kneeling-Most gra- cious liege, I kiss your hand. Vic .oyia- Beak, you have deceived us, in that you said our policy was popular among our most loyal subjects. when you knew, our Lord of Bea- consfeld, that you, ah-were misinformed. Beak-Your Royal Highness, hear me. Vic Not word. You have bulldozed our royal orown, and we are mad Begone! Got thee to taunery! What ho, there. The block We would beguile our aching head with the fifteen puzzle Leopold, show Beak out New York Commercial Advertiser.
 Scotch gentleman, visiting some friends in England, displayed in conversation such contempt for the memory of England's most iIlustrious sons that one of the family solved to pay him off in his own coin. He therefore took down a steel engraving of John Knox which adorned the dining room wall and hung it up in lightless lumber room. The Sootchman, missing the picture, asked what had become of it. ''We no longer consider yourlreformsr worthy of place here, " said his friend, therefore we have hung him up in dark closet" ''You could not have done better" said the Scotchman. q consider ths situation very appropriate, for if ever man could throw light on a dark thing that was