The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1880-12-19
Y

NO n ought TO complain II the
world measures him as he measures
others. To measure one with his owl
yardstick may be hard, but it is also
fair.
When you do not need help from any
one, then any one Will help yon; and
when yon do need help, the world is
somehow always looking the other
way.
The wise ones say that nothing is so
hard to bear as prosperity; but some
men would like TO engage in some hard
work OF that description just to have n
practical illustration of the adage.
A poor excuse is better than none,at
all. When a boy was called to account
for going fishing on Sunday he replied;
Il know | do, but then before the fish
begin to bite | always whistle M Of
Moody and Sankey's tunes"
What most men want is dednitiye-
ness Of opinion. In different moods
the same thing is apt 10 look, at one
time like n whale. and at another like "a
weasel. They + in the position of
Judge Peters, who when sitting on the
bench alone n day declared that
Tho Court is divided in opinion"
Wives ought really to be more care
ful about telling all the truth of their
husbands: ''Why do you start SO when
ever leone into the roomg" asked n
brusquc man OF his better half. at is
only my nerves, my poor nerves" she
replied, (which are so very weak that !
am startled by every stupid thing /
see.n
An Irislman knows how TO pay n
compliment, but he does not always put
it in the right place. A beautiful young
Lady happened TO shudder, and after
ward said, referring to the old adage,
''Some one is walking over my grave"
Patrick could not lose the chance to
say something very polite. and so he
replied, ''on, my lady, l only wish that
| were the happy man.
Wehave always had u great deal OF
respect for the good sense -. the young
lady who, when Gustayus Adolplus
threw himself on his knee and declared
that, unless she married him he would
certainly commit suicide, quietly re-
piled, my dear friend, l can't possibly
believe that You love Inc so fondly as
that, unless you give mt proof by at once
doing it.n lie has been equally in love
since that time, but never suggested to
the lady the same contingency. The
river flows by his door, but no can't
persuade himself that u sudden death
would DO at all agreeable. AS a figure
OF rhetoric il is sometimes very efIec-
tive, but as n matter of fact not con-
ducive TO hilarity.
According to the Judgment OF the
older members of the colored race there
is a kind Of connection between educa-
ton and morality. They labor under
the delusion that the more n man knows
the better he ought to be. One Of these
curly haired patriarchs vented his in
dignation at the complete failure of the
public school OF the south TO bring up
to n proper level the moral sense of the
people by saying TO u delinquent youth:
''It's been two weeks since you Dor
rowed dat thing. Now, what goods
eddycashun gwine ter do when you go
to school a whole year and den can't
tell how long it ought to take to fotch
back dat missing hatchet?"
Even tho poor inebriate has a logic of
his own. When he returned to his
domicile in the early hours OF the morn
ing the words which greeted him were
not those of tender solicitude, hoping
that he had enjoyed himself with his
friends, but rather words Of somewhat
severe criticism. She looked at him
for n moment rs ho attempted to ex-
plain that the ministers meeting did not
adjourn rs early as he had hoped, and
then said, with whitening scorn,
''.John, you are intoxicated" Seeing
that he was discovered he threw Off all
disguise and replied: swell Mary, l
did the best | could; and il you had
taken as much wine rs | did you would
lie n good deal more intoxicated h l