Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1880-03-11
Sips of Fun.
A Joint affair-rheumatism.

: A joint affair-rheumatisrn.
A good judge of mutton ough
to be wether wise.
! A mad dog is a pronouncet
. instance of cur-rage.
The wise man telleth his love
: but the foolish man writeth it il
: a letter.
"Unmanned by the loss of he
! husband" is the latest style of
indicating widows grief.
Little Johnnie says: '"Talk a.
bout your base-burning stoves
my mas old slipper is a hot e.
nough base-burner for me.p
The "missile toe bow is what
the fellow called it when he bent
double after being kicked out of
a young lady's house by hel
stern parent.
A man stabbed another the
other day in Brooklyn with a
pair of scissors. 1t is always
dangerous to interrupt a man
who is writing editorials.
1t was observed by the late
Mr.. A. Ward that American or
ators had a bad habit of stopping
over. 1t has also been noticed
that the man who slops over most
has the least in him.
What poets mean by q "long
FAREWELL is the sort of farewell
Ole Bull bids to the American
public. 1t takes him thirty years
to bid it, and then he returns to
fiddle one night by special re-
quest.
Last Sunday a certain New
port mother asked her daughter
if she wasn't going to wear her
cloak to church, as it was kind
of chilly. She Immediately re-
piled: "Why, no; Pm going to
wear my new belt"
"Cannot something be done to
prevent young ladies being insul-
ted on the streets at night?" in
quires an exchange. Why, yes.
Have the old lady tuck them
safely in bed at sun-down and
fasten the door.
No one knows who invented
the fashion in society of turning
down the corner of a visiting
card; but the fashion of turning
down the corner of a street was
first thought of by the man who
owed small bill to the trades
man he saw coming.
"If you marry Grace, ,''exclaim-
ed an irate father to his son, 81
will cut you off without a cent,
and you won't have SO much as
a piece of pork to boil in the
pot" "Well," replied the young
man, "Grace before meat" And
he went Immediately in search
of a minister.
A small boy got up to read a
composition on "The Tree" He
had got as far as "This subject
has many branches" when the
teacher said, "Stop! you haven't
made your bough YET" eff you
interrupt me again, "said the boy,
"I'll leave" "You give me any
more impudence, and I'll take the
sap out of you. Do you under
stand?" said the teacher. 81
twig," said the boy, and then the
regular order of business was re-
sumed.
A sad looking man went into
a Burlington drug store. "Can
you give me-" he asked, "some-
thing that will drive from my
mind the thoughts of sorrow and
bitter recollections?" And the
druggist nodded, and put him up
a little dose of fquinine, and worm
wood, and rhubarb, and EPSON
salts, and a dash of castor oil,
and gave it to him, and for six
months the man couldn't think
of anything in the world except
new schemes to get the taste out
of his mouth.
An old darkey, who was asked
if in his experience prayer was
ever answered, replied: "Well,
sab, some pra'ars is ansud and
some isn't-'pends on wat you
axes fo'. jest arter de wah,
wen it was mighty hard scratch
in fo' de cullud breddren, l 'sarv-
ed dat w'eneber l pway de Lo'd
to sen one O. Marse Peyton's fat
turkeys fo' de ole man, dare was
no notice took OBJ de partition;
but wen / pway dat He would
sem de ole man fo' de turkey, de
matter was tended to befo' sun
up mex mornin', dead sartin."
A colored brother who was
considered too pompous and too
voluminous in his prayer meeting
exhortatiOns, was demonstrated
with on account of his many in