The Orangeburg democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1879-1881, 1880-01-30
Wives and Husbands.


not what they might, could, and
should be? Because in nine cases
out of ten it is for want of temper or
Judgment in the man. We have all
heard Of the cautious individual who
would see his wife's grandmother be-
fore he took the irrcvocable VOW. He
was quite right. A man desiring to
enjoy the deli shts and consultations
unknown to n single condition, pre-
pared to love and cherish under all
calamities and changes, would do
well, if possible, TO learn little OF
the early training of the woman lie
desires to make Il partner of Ais joys
and the consoler Of his sorrows, and
to have some knowledge OF her in a
domestic relation. II seems hard in
this our day TO find the medium be-
tween the fashionable wife, all frivoll-
ty, dress, and excitement, and the
female yirtuoso, or the woman with
out tact; but there are women, Of
many of whom it may be truly said
in scriptural language, "the heart of
her husband doth surely trust in her.
How often are these women linked to
the vicious and the unstable, are
obliged to shut their eyes TO facts,
and when love is gone, live on endnr-
ing? Marriage to them has been a
desperate Thing, a curse and slavery,
instead of the nearest approach to
perfect happiness permitted on earth.
OF the drunken rufiian, quick with
blows, we have nothing to say-he is
scarcely one remove from the beasts
that perish, and, rs rule, belongs to
the extreme loYer class but among
the so-called gentlemen there is the
overbearing, tyrannical huS5and, at
whose voice children and servants
flee, soured probably by difficulties in
his business or profe ession, but surlily
keeping his trials from his wife, ard
snappishly resenting all :,er attempts
10 win His confidence. Who so capa-
ble rs she to soothe and to aid by
her womanIy tact and discrimination,
made keencr by its concentration in
her little word-homc and have we
tot sacred warrant that the wife is il
lielpmcet for the man, not slave to
minister TO his material wants only,
while lie grudgingly dolcs out his
money, never dreaming that the order
of his house is only arrived ut by q
thousand little domestic cares, so
heavy in the total, yet n labor Of love
when lightened by kind, husbandly
interest. This man acts as if he were
devoid Of affection himself and gross
ly presumes on his wife's early incul-
Gated sense Of duty.
Then we have the hcnpcck ed hus-
band. Now the censorous world con-
temptuoslY laughs at his name, and
discusses the anxious, irritable wife !;
it never troubles itself to consider the
weak, vacillating man lie must ncccs-
sarily be in his safest condition. He
is nevcr-ceasing anxiety to his wife,
who knows he must he neither fool
or n scoundrcl. She tolls early and
late with brain and fingers to rcctify
his sins of omission. Her pitiful ten
dcrness must always follow him and
hold his watering mind in check lest
his selfish folly should bring more
troubles into the household impovcr-
ished by his careless indifference,
leaving his wife to fight the battle
of life single-handed. He is only
amiable when gratified, loving when
epered q difficulty, giving q few
fat.ering words Of praise at his wife's
clever management-more painful
than pleasing, for she knows their
yalue-ill-tempercd if forced to do
anything he dislikes, and coarse in
his taunts about nagging and bickcr.
ing. If she is righteously and stern
ly compelled to give ugly names to
his proctastination he will occasional
]y cry Peccavi, thereby firmly bcliev
ing he has washed out a.f his sins
and may begin them again on the
morrow. With such q man wife
cannot Cake the inferior attitude
which all womanly wonou really de-
light in, but must unpoetically fulfill
Wordsworth's picture Of
"a perfect woman, nobly planned,
10 warn, to comfort, and command"
The last, but not least, we have the
salt of the earth-great and gifted,
fan1pr 0nn trun mon ubncn livoc n ra