, 1880-01-04
USEFUL RULES.
EurfIe{tf


Don't yQu love to read the maxims which some
wise man writes for the newspapers,-useful
rules which nre intended to save human life and
alleviate human suffering? There is always SO
much practical common sense in them. Here is
q batch, for them:
s'For dust in the eyes, avoid rubbing. and dash
water in them."
This is especially useful when you are on the
cars, and there isn't drop Of water in the coun-
try nearer than the engine, or the next lake,
forty three miles behind you.
s'Remove cindeEs with the point Of pencil"
We never saw that operation tried but once,
and then 1T was successful. The man got out
the cindcr. He also put out his eye.
ssRemove insects from the ear by tepid water;
never put hard instrument into the ear.''
Yes, that is pretty advice now: isn't it7 Sup
pose nm Indian Peace Commissioner gets m in
that man to suffer until he can reach the Mis-
sissfppiRive in order to get enough water TO
fill bis ear?
If the skin is destroyed cover with varnish.''
4 beautiful spectacle "a man would present
who had gone up In boiler excursion N 9
lust enough to make two coats Of furniture
varnish necessity according to this admirable
rule; 81,
Just Imagine, now, what circus smoking
car would present If every man mar who entered 1t
kePs Smother mott era Rre xth carpets ar water will often
spread burning oil md increase the danger"
That's all well enonE ent t,o when tsaa mans 1hads
steam-engines can throw water, he hasn't the
time, and frequently he hasn't the money, to
buy whole carpet-store to throw over the con-
than wod sooa S
"For fnintfng, lay the body flu t."
, Now. that is good rule; there is some sense in
4t.oA urH
body Hat before you faint, it may save you ter
riflc thump when you fall Let me add to this
rule the advice never faint on ladder, or RI IN 70
front Of runaway team. It isn't safe. =,
t*Suck poisonous wounds: unless your mouth
is sore; enlarge the wound or better cut the
" Il TINT isn't lively piece Of advtce for sane
man to give to healthy peoplel Listen here Is re-,
get II scratch on the throat, don't enlarge it or
cut it ont. And, If you get a wound On the back
Of your neck, don't you Try to reach it with you.
there'i tioii be seu broken neck IL the family:
mouth and nose protecting
the cap-sheaf You cut that out and paste it on
your cuff, where You can always STE IT, JUST
follow that rule and you will never drown. NC
matter II you stay in the water twenty years, y
you will just float on your back, with the nose
and mouth projecting above the water, you
won't drown. We don't know what wise mum
WrOlG LuG5G AAAe hAAo te+'~ SAS ~ s~-
the rest.
QURS.
II sou would have a clear vision never put
your - rye" in your mouth.
An Irishman says he can see no earthly reason
why women should not ne allowed to become
medical men.
Business Man" You yagabond! You send
word in that you want to see me on business,
and when ask you what your business is-you
begv' vagabond-"B But you forget, sir, begging
is my business!'
At tho Cattle Show: Young Farmer" Are
you fond of beasts, Miss Gusherton?' Miss
Gu ushcrton-"O Oh, really, Mr.. Fawker, If you
mean that as declaration, you must speak to
mammn!"-Ptnch.
Emerson says man ought to carry pencil
and note down the thoughts Of tho moment
Yes, and one short pencil, devoted exclusively
about 1000 years, and then have the original
point on.-Buristtc-
4 little bit Of girl wanted more and more but.
tered toast till she was told that too much would
her her diincuity, and m exclaimed: aWcil, give me
aunuzer piece and send for the doctor
"Honesty the best policy" Country ct1- practi.
toner ae me e what u prngs
tuSbed peristaltic action}-" we'll atr, me lact
ISL feel rather queer, and County practi-
noucr-"Then why don't you take one Of your
Pearls Of Health ~ Quack-' That's lust IT,
sir! I think I've swallowed one-by mistakef'-
Punch
We are solemnly assured by prominent Mint
Official that when last month it was found TINT
the amount Of bullion coined ut TINT lnstitution e,
did not tally with the amount received, the u,
dies in tho adjusting department were required
to clean their nails and turn In the debris TO be
assnyed. The cleanup from this source
nmoi,nted to over $:7,O00, and there are fonr
pair Of hands to hear from yet-Sdn francisco;
Post.
:. Inst now in at Smiths" said Jones, his face
flushed with the proud consciousness OF gooo
deed done, - my honesty bad severe ss1aiq: @ "a
ticed he left q half dollar of his change on 1he
counter NY rst donf Was thopPP6 to P6ckav
Heayen! No; ! Just put my fingers near 1t
Smith banded me y 9st ega gss 9st aad eg
Seemed sort O. providential, didn't it. Yes" he
Continued, there is no doubt about It; honesty