Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1880-08-26
Mrs. MGWiliamS and the LIGHTNING.
Mark Twain.

for TINS was nnt 'ne beginning Vi a,s u,A,
the fear OF lightning Is one OF the most
distressing iniirm'tles hnlnan ne,ng can
be afflicted with. 10 IL mostly conhheu 10
women; but now and then you ma IL N
little cog, ana sometimes III MAI ~
is particularly distressing ihhfm'ty' ior
the reason that II lakes the Aahu OUT u
person to an extent when no othsr te"5
can, and it cant be reasoned win, anu
nehher can IL b" snaneu ou' u peiso III
A womau who could face the very devil
hlnseli--or mouse, ios.s nei esip nv
goes ell 10 pieces m rom OF n ,'iii, 81
lightning. Her tflghl Is tolie'nliB ti''iu'
ioste w ,.t
k&Well, as l was teiing you, 1 Nehe up,
with That smolhereu ana u ,3,, oty
vi Mortimer! mortimer WANING ~ 10y
ears and AS soon ~ ! couid Serape my
faculties togethet l rearneu over i" 'he
dark aud then SAID,
"Evangellhe, Is that you aAling "na'
Is the matter where are you
sat mp IN tine ooot-oioset' tou oush
To bs ashamed 10 ne thero anu Hie'p '"'
aud such aud AWtul storm Bo'ns Oh.
why, now o"'t one pe aenaule" Mhoh
ha is asleep? 1t lis unreasonable mhh
eaat be ashamed When ne IL asieeP' HNan-
geline
You never try, Moftimer, KNOW
very well you never Try
caught the sound OF mum 81 sooS.
That sound smotc dead the sharp speech
that was on my lips, and chanSea IL 10
I'm sorry, dear-lm truly sorry'
never meant to act SO. Come oacR ana -
MORTIMER !"
''Heayens! what IS the matter, my
iove2
DO you mean TO say you are IN 'ha'
he'd yet ~
why, OF course.
Come out of 1t instantly. shoula
think you would take some l'et'e care VI
your lne, for my sake ana the chiiuren .
if you will not for your own.
but my Love-
Don't talk 10 me- Mo,tilner' lou
kh0to there IL no place so dangerous as
bed, IN such thunderstorm as TINS, an
the books say that yet there you Woulu
lie, and deliberately throw away your NE,
for goodness knows what' unless ior the
sake oil arguing ana arguing, anu
But eonfound it, EVaneeiin'' I'm n'S
IN the bed, moo. In,
sentence interrupted by ii sudden glare
OF lightning, followed oy termed little
scream from Mrs McWiiliams ana a
tremendous blast OF thunder
There You see the result: oh'
Mortimer, how can you be SO prohlgate as
TO swear OF such TIME as TINS
i ddht swear Ana that DaSt
result OF 1t, any way. II would nave
come, Just the same II l haan saia
word; and you know very wen, EVange-
liue,-at least you ought to know, thai
when the atmosphere Is charged WIN
electricity
"oh, yes, now argue 1t, and argue IT,
ana argue I'll don't see now you can
act so, when you kn0io there Is not
lightning ROD on the place, ana your poor
wife and children are aosoa'siy at tue
mercy OF providence what are you
dong lighting match at such time
as this Are you stark mad 7"
"Hang 1t, woman, where's the harm
Inc place is as dark as the inside oil an
lnhdel, and
Put 1t out! put 1t out instantly! Are
you determined to sacrifice us all You
Know there Is nothing attracts lightning
IKE hght. fSt!-crdSh! D9on-
D0S0ont G0om'Ooom! On, Just near IL
NOW you see what you We done
NO, l d01t see what I've done. A
match may attract lightning. Tor all
know, but 1t don't cause lightning LII 60
odds on that. And 1t didn't attract II
worth q cent this time; for II that shot
was leyeled at my match, it was blessed
poor Workmanship, about an average Of
none out OF possible million, l should
say Why, at Dollymount, such marks
manship as that
For shame, Mortimer Here we are
standing right In the presence OF death
and yet in so solemn moment you are
capable of using such language as that. L
you have no desire to Mortimer"
"Well 2"
"Did you say your prayers tonight
s'I--I-meant to, but got to trying tt
cipher out how much twelve time
thirteen is, and - ....
Fst!-5o0m-je1T0m loom! humble
Wntble Jang.sMAsH ..-.
"Oh, We are lost, beyond all help! Hoy
G0ud you neglect such thing at such
time as this ?"
but it ,CaSnt such time as this
There wasn't cloud in the sky. Ho'
could / know there was going to be a
this rumpus and pow-wow about littl
slip like that And l don't think it's jus
fair for you to make so much out of it, an
way, seeing it happens so seldom:
haven't missed before since brought o
that earthquake, four years ago.
MORTIMER! How you talk Have 70
forgotten the yellow fever p
My dear, you are always thowing u
the yellow fever to me, and 1 think it
perfectly unreasonable. You can't eve
send Geographic message as far
Memphis without relays, so how is littl
devotional slip OF mine going to carry :
far ? I'll staHd the earthquake, because
was in the peieLborhood hut m /
hanged if I'm going to be responsible f,
every blaned''-
Fzt NOON JerOOm-boom ,a.boou :.
BANG
"Oh, dear, dear, dear | k3t0in it stru,
something, Mortimer. We never shall -
the light of another day and if IT will {
you any good to remember. when we a
gone, that your dreadful Language
Mortimer ~
WELL What now -
Your voice sounds as fly ortim,
are you actually standing in front of til
open fire. place ~
THAT is the very crime [ am CO,
hitting
Get away from it, this momer
You DO seem determined TO bring {
structon on us all. Don't YOU kj.1,o fl
there is no better conductor for linhtni
than m open chimney Nam where IVA
You got to 2"
"Tm here by the window
Oh, for PHYS sake. have YOU lost vr
mindY Clear out from there this nome
a