The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1880-11-11
Badly Confused.

Nothing can be more comical than the
scared anxiety of a ''cornered" party
who does not know which side of the
fence to get down on. A Southern pa
per tells the following:
Soon after the battle of Prairie Grove,
three Confederate officers of rank came
into our army to negotiate for an ex-
change of prisoners. Three Union Off
GERS were detailed to negotiate with them,
One day, while the commission was in
session, an old, gray-headed, gray
bearded Arkansas farmer walked in and
asked:
''Es this the Provo's offis?"
Some one attempted to explain, but
the old fellow being quite deaf, did not
understand, and said:
:.'Yes, Tn good loyal citizen; I've
got my protection papers; I've been and
got paid for my forage Its all right"
sLook here" said Col. W, of the
Union army, ''you had better be careful
about what you say about your loyalty;
don't you see those gentlemen over
there?" pointing across the table to
where the Confederate officers sat in
their gray uniforms.
The old man took out pair of dilapi-
| dated spectacles, and fixing them on his
nose, closely examined the gray uniforms
with their velvet collars and brass stars.
His hands trembled violently, and he
seemed quite frightened, but collected
himself and said to the .Confederates:
"Well, gentlemen, I meant no offence.
I didn't know-fact is, I've allus been a
Southern man.. I've jest got one son,
and he's with Marmaduke The only
other man grown in my family that's fit
for sarvis is my darter Sallie's husband,
and he's with Rector, and
"Hold ON, old fellow" cried Col. W,
"what aboutyour being asloyal citizen?"
He looked at the other. side of the ta-
BILE. Then he readjusted his spectacles,
scanned the blue coats, took off his hand
kerchief from about his neck, blew his
nose, leaned both hands on the table and
said:
'Well, gentlemen, this is little mixed,
but you jist go on and fight it out among
yourselves. can live under any gov
ernment. ,"
Bringing Drowned Bees to Life.
A lady in Providence relates the fol-
lowing story: Her father once brought
home a molasses hogshead to be used as
water tank. On washing day her
mother said:
"Let's throw the suds in it to soak the
molasses from the bottom"
The instant she had done SO she ex-
claimed:
ooh, I have drowned hundreds of our
neighbours bees.
The hogshead was black with bees that
were busily appropriating the sweet from
what they must have considered an enor-
nous blossom, The good lady made
haste with her skinner to skim the bees
from the top of the water and spread
them on a board in the sunshine, but
they seemed drowned and nearly dead,
and she was very sorry. The bees that
were around the hogshead had flown
away at the dash of the water, but in a
few minutes they returned, accompanied
by scores of others. Then began a GU
rious work. They Immediately went to
work on the unfortunate bees, turning
them over and working on them con-
stantly with their heads, feet and anten-
ne. The result of their busy labor was
that one after another gave signs of life,
stretching the limbs and wings, crawled
about and dried itself in the sun, and
few away The lady said there were a
half-pint at first, and that there remained
only about a dozen helpless cases beyond
the humane efforts Of their brothers.