Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1880-10-01
Hawkeye + litOrial Dots.
George Francis S rain is ut it aga

NeOTRS CEuuCl5 . Ialu ~ Ut IL dRUIu.
A Saratoga ball is called a grand
dress parade.
Bret Harte will write novel on
sweet English rural life.
At the Maine seaside resorts there
are ten women to one Laan.
Manageable young men are wanted
at some OF the summer resorts.
Rowell, the pedestrian, is writing his
biography. 1t will be in rather run
zeal strain.
David Davis wants to run Cor Presi-
dent the next time on u ticket with
DR.. Tanner.
the Capture of the Ben Ter family,
divides the. public Interest with the con-
dition of Dr.. Tauner.
An Iudi ma peddler, eixty-one years
old. has Just run away with his third
wife. While there's life there's slope.
A Cincinnati dyer recently went in
sane from political excitement. We
suppose the more he red the madden lie
got.
Tue proposed "grey aud blue " re-
union at Gettysburg battlefield, will
be kind of clasping hands across the
bloody sarchusm.
A young man of South Hill, who
went to Leadville last spriug, writes
home to his father that he is suffering
FROM u violent attack Of promoueya.
Burlington ought to be fashionable
summer resort. Tae report of the Ma
tian,l u ,,rl aE fI ,,lth chnuyS hnk =
is the healthiest place on the continent.
1t is said that Governor Davis, OF
Maine, studied Latin in the army.
That is singular; we don't see how he
| got along with his nouus, rs 1t WASH
the rule in the army for a man to de
clue anything.
Many physicians claim that intemper-
ance is disease. 1t must be contagious
then; at any rate. man who gets
drunk usually catches it when he goes
home. There may appear to he some
little discrepancy or contradiction here,
but we can't stop for that now.
"But you can't get home if the wind
is dead against us, can you ? inquired
the nearest passenger "Ol! yes re-
piled the N ,ntucket skipper, " Oh! yes
had the boat made with two sides, on
purpose, 50 that when she couldn't sail
on one tack, she could GU the other. 1t
Is the ouly boat in these waters that
is built that way" And the passenger
was treasured and the "Clara" got in
on time.
1t is asserted that after few drinks
of both liquids, no man can d'sting nish
claret from bu,ternilk by tue taste, aud
this statement hus been proved by ex
periments. Tuere is pothiDg remark
able about that, however. Beyond g
certain point, which il Ordinarily
reached by l A. M. very few men cal
tell the difference between whisky and
sel,zer, especially if he takes them to
ge,her.
A Toronto patent medicine man re-
ceutly ruined the sale of his 4" Pulmonit
BAlsam" by publishing II Testimonial
from man who asserted that "hi'
wife, who had not been able to speal
above whisper tor five years, had bel
voice completely restored by the use o
one bottle" When the Toronto mai
realized the effect of the publication
he wrung his hands and said, 'Ai
enemy hath done this thing"
1t was ON Sound boat, and the mat
was evidently annoyed about some
thing. Garry it forward" he rOared
Gary it forward, YOU Junk heade'
son of scuIpln, or 1 hope to be ge
whizzley gaul e!usted to jude if l don
maui the dad slammed head Offn y
with capstan bar, you hogbacked mol
!igrubber. ye!" Aud the deck han'
looked up in profound admiration ant
) said: by George, Cap, if 1 had you
culcher, l wouldn't he runnin' a
mate for no mau in these waters, Id b
commandin' boat of my own"