Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1880-08-26

One good turn deserves another. |
Gladstone has always upheld the British |
Constitution, and now the British consti-
tuition upholds him.-Fhila. Bulletin
Three fishers went over the Canada line
Three fishers went for a jolly good time;
Three ilshers came home without wetting line,
And two of those fishers hadn't a dime
Tother sharp fisher raked the pot every time.
While moving log recently, Milo Par
SONS of Worthwhile, Conn, found himself
suddenly covered from head to foot with
hornets Want of space forbids publios-
tion of his remarks Boston Transcript.
The relatives of an Incorporate man
put reptile into one of his boots that he
might see it, and, thinking he 'had 'em,"
reform. But it was no go, AZ the reptile
they used was water snake, and he knew
that couldn't be caused by whisky.
A Michigan deacon has been found
"guilty of indiscretion" by committee,
because he kissed young lady under an
umbrella. AS he dinnt take pains to hold
the umbrella so that his wife couldn't see
him, we think the committee was correct
He softly kissed his sleeping wife,
Then, with lingering look
OF fond affection, straightway went
And kissed her pretty cook
Alas for h IN, the gentle wife
lie thought asleep was not,
And for her cook and hubby, too,
She made il mighty hot.
''This is a nice time of night for you to
be coming in" said mother to her
daughter, who returned from walk at 10
o'clock. when / was like you," con-
tinued she, my mother would not allow
me out later than Z o'clock" "Oh, you
had nice sort of a mother" murmured
the girl. 81 had, you young jade" said
the mother. "a nicer mother than ever
you had !"
gentleman named OFlynn,
Sat down on a bended pin,
Then he hustled about,
And pulled the thing out
As quickly as 1t went in.
Gen. Pleasonton claims to have had the
best horse in the army during the war.
81 bought him." he says, ''from Prince
de Joinville. The Prince paid So, 600 for
him, and got him when the Prince was
going away for 5000. He was as gentle
as lamb, with the courage of the devil
and speed of the wind. He could 20
without eating or drinking, and was as
pretty as a woman. He could jump any,
thing before him. left him In charge of
a bugler one day, and that was the last l
ever saw of either the bugler or the horse.
They went over to the enemy"
The San Francisco Post has the follow
ing item: MRS. Charles De Long, widow
Of the late Minister to Japan, yesterday
obtained a warrant authorizing the search
ing of the premises of Sam Yuen, a Dupont
street merchant, in order to recover
valuable cup and saucer stolen from her
and found in the store. The article is of
sea green jetty stone, valued at Sl 200,
and was present from the Mikado of
Japan to the deceased Minister. The
article was found, and Yuen said he had
bought it from Ohinaman for S15,
neither of them, however, knowing its
value.
AN HISTORICAL CoNuNDRUM,
No theme appalls the mind of youth,
However deep, Profound or daring;
And if boys wonder, Ills at TRUTH
For when on fables they are farng.
The story which IL deemed 80 splendid
Is by that spendor well commended.
The teacher told of William Tell,
Of how, with trusty bow and arrow,
He shot the apple of so well
From his sons head-a tale to harrow
The youthful mind that sti is tender,
And dazzle others with its splcndOr.
The story told, the teacher stopped
To answer any wondering question,
When suddenly an urchn dropped
This very singular suggestions
"Plcase sir, with this | cannot grappc,
I'd like to know who ate The apple ?"
Rev. Henry Ward Beecher some time
since received a letter from young man,
who recommended himself very highly as
being honest, and closed with the request,
"Get me an easy situation that honesty
may be rewarded" To which Mr.. Beecher
replied: "Don't be an editor if you would
be easy Do not try the law. Avoid
school keeping, Keep out of the pulpit.
Let alone all ships, stores, shops and mer-
chandise. Abhor politics. Keep away
from lawyers. Don't practice medicine.
Be not farmer nor mechanic, neither
soldier no a sailor. Don't study. Don't
think. Don't work. None of them are
easy. Oh, my honest friend, you are in a
very hard world know of but one
easy place in it. That ID the grave"
"wonld you mind standing here till
go in and get cigar? ?" he asked. "Of
course not" she replied, "but don't you
think, Henry that smoking is offensive,
and that it will be easier prscticng econ.
omy after marriage if it is practiced during
courtship p "You're right he said 81
sbhh sn"ho "uJ ii''", $685. ""' 80
| looked nnutterable love at him as they
| rasn,rpd their stroll ,J,st then thew came
to a,, ;ce cream saloon and he said
| "rhere, now, i meant to treat you to ice
| cream but M Won say, il is best to practice
| ..,r,.,, ,,,.;,,,. aor-tsb;, fpar oants
ecohonhy o"t.ns po"i .ship' oh oh'o
| for cigar, thirty cents Tor TWO Ice creams
| forty cents saved in single night. Let's
| ~, o,,,'r IN tba fountain .nJ gat a drink nj
water" They went, but she was mad
enough to bite her own head off.
.
AN oph-io a ia ,,, iSu "uAh, ,o
mule d3st tee 81, the an aaem appIoavn s, ui ueaF
Dost note il II, ti,y short and Mbored breath
And in thy failing vision? o mule, ray.
Tho, stan est est oy the q awin. " tvsrS m or,S nnr
Inrn back Inv tbonshts and Of thy past life think
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