Daily Republican., 1880-08-07
LIVELY FoR ONE WEEK.
Mark Twain's First Editorial Ex.
parience.

psrience.
was very smart child at the age
Of thirteen--an unusually smart child,
thought at that Il ne. II was then
that did my first newspaper scrib.
bling, and most unexpectedly to me IL
stirred mp fine sensation in the COM
munity. II did indeed, and was
very proud Of 1t, too.
was printers "devil," and pro-
gressivs and aspiring one. My uncle
had me on his paper (the Weekly
Hannibal Journal, two dollars year
in advanoe-500 subscribers, and they
paid in cOrd-wood, cabbage, and un
marketable turnips), and ON a lucky
summers day he left town to be gone
q week, and asked me i'll thought
could edit one issue Of the paper judi
ciously. All, didn't l want to try [!
Hinton was the editor Of the rival pa
per. He had lately been jited, and
one night friend found an open note
on the poor fellows bed, in which he
stated that he could no longer endure
life and had drowned himself in Bear
Creek. The friend ran down there
and discovered Hinton wading back TO
to shore He had soncluded he
wouldn't. The village was full of it
for several days, but Hinton did not
suspect IL. thought this was Gne
opportunity. wrote an elaborately
wretched account OF the whole matter,
and then illustrated 1t with the villain
GUS cuts engraved on the bottoms Of
wooden type with q jaok-knife-one Of
them picture Of Hinton wsding ont
into the creek In his shirt with q Ian
tern, sounding the depth Of the water
with walking stick. Thought II was
funny, and was densely
unconscious that there was any moral
obliquity about such q publication.
Being satisfied with this effort, II
looked around for other worlds to con-
quer, and 1t struck me that 1t would
make good, interesting matter to charge
the editor Of q neighboring country
paper with q piece Of gratuitous
rascality and "see him squirm !" II
did 1t, putting the article into the
form Of Q parody on the Burial Of "sir
John Moore"-and pretty crude
parody II was too.
Then I lampooned two prominent
citizens outrageously-not because
they had done anything to deserve 1t,
but merely becauseI thought 1t WAS
my duty to make things lively.
Next gently touched up the newest
stranger-the lion Of the day, the gor-
geous journeyman tailor from Quincy.
He was simpering coxdomb Of the fret
water and the "loudest" dressed man
In the State. He was an inveterate
killer. Every week he wrote
lushy poetry" for the Journal about
his newest conquest. His rhymes for
my week headed ITO Mary in Ill.,"
meaning to Mary in Hannibal Of course.
But while setting mp the piece
was suddenly riven from head to
heel by what regarded as perfect
bolt Of humor, and COM
pressed It into q snsppy foot-note at
Ihe bottom-thus: 1--WE will let this
hing pass Just this once; but We wish
Mr.. J. Gordon Russell to understand
distinctly that we have q character to
and from this time forth when
be wants to commune with his friends
in HI he must select some other me-
lium than the colums Of this journal"
The paper came ont, and l never
knew any little thing,to attract 80 much
as those playful trides Of
nine. For once the Hannibal "JOur-
nal" was in demand-a novelty 1t
1 had not experienced before. The
whole town was stirred. Hinton drop
ped in with a double bsrrelled shotgun
,arly In the forenoon. When he
ound that it was an infant Gas he call
ID me) that had done him the damage,
he simply pulled my ears and went
away but he threw up his situation
hat night and left town for good. The
;ailor came with his goose and pair Of
,hears but he despissd me, too, and
departed for the South that night. The
Two lampooned citizens came with
hreats Of libel, and went away incens-
ID at my insignifcsnoe. The country
,dltor pranoed in with war.whoop
,ext day, suffering for blood to drink
,ut he ended by forgiving me cordially
md inviting me down to the drug store
% wash away all animosity in friend
y bumper Of "Fshnestock's Vermi-
'uge." II was his little joke. |
My uncle was very angry when he
rot back---unreasona 80, thought,
what an impetus | had
,iven the paper, and considering also
hat gratitude tor his preservation
,ught to have been uppermost In his
mind, inasmuch as by his delay he had
10 wonderfully escaped dissection, tom
libsl, and getting his head
hot of. But he softened when he
ooked at the accounts and saw that |
,ad actually booked the unparalleled
number of thirty-three new subscribers
md had the vegetables to show for 1t,
,ord-wood, cabbage, beans, and upsal-
.ble turnips enough to run the family
tor two years