The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1880-10-27

wv ~ oe VIC iepuIier ufdHk tine sOud water
favored with pineapple syrup.
Yes, very good,''
The drug clerk laughed sardonically and
said
"of course. But then you don't know
whatitis made OFF,
What do you mean !,
THE old mans out, )" he said, looking eau
tiously around the store, " and I'll let you in
to some of the secrets of the business, il YOU
won't give me away"
Strict secrecy being promised, he con-
tinued
The old man made that pine apple syrup,
but he didn't make it right from the fruit
He made II out Of old cheese that you could
smell through fire proof safe. Full of skip
pers, too III tell you a curious thing about
that cheese The old man cut off slice and
brought 1t up stairs here with him one night.
lie laid II on the counter; next morning it
was gone. Come to look, the little animals
had showed it on to the floor, wriggled it
down the stairs, and put it back exactly in its
old place in the cheese. The old man said
that was an extraordinary illustration of the
strength of the home instinct in the brute
creation.
/" Yes, and our sarsaparilla syruphe doctors
up by extracting juice from boot-legs and old
trunks. He distis all our lemon syrup from
roofing shingles and from chips that we get
over here from the cooper's shop and when
we run out of raspberry, all he wants is a
handful Of red bugs, a gallon Of coal oil and
bali an hour BY himself. And as for the soda
water itself-wei, IL people only knew how
we use up seidlitz powders when the soda is
short, the stored be Quilted by bowling mob
in Less an hour
DO you do that kind of thing often =
Often is not the word for it. The drug
business is terrific These porous plasters.
The old man has national reputation for
them. He makes 'em out of old sub. bonnets
and glue -cuts up the sun-bonnets and smears
on the glue; and when you get one of his
plasters on your back it is there for life.
There's man comes in here most every day
to swear at the old man because he put on
one of our plasters for lame back in 1s4s,
time of the Mexican war, and as he couldn't
get 1t of, the skin grew over it like tile bark
of tree, you know. That plaster has work.
ed further and further in NATL now it's gone
to his lungs, and it pulls at his left lung In a
way to set him crazy. He is very remark
able chemst-the old man. do believe he
could make paragoiic out OF old umbrellas,
and boil down an illustrated weekly paper in.
to altar of roses He has the blandest ipee.
nuity. You wouldn't believe"
But your customers are generally salts
fled 2"
oh yes. You see, they don't know. A
doctor sends prescription here, written in a
dead language. We don't bother ourselves to
try to read It. ask the boy what's the mat
ter with the patient. Then l put little
cayenne pepper in some niolasses, and touch
her up with assafetida to give her a good
strong smell, and drop in some squlls and
ipecac to make AK ind of a. goneness ithc
stomach, and stir In some NORWOOD to make
her take hold Of the interior department. and
then.et her go. Patient thinks IT'S splendid.
because 1t tastes nasty and the old man gets
the money, and 50 everybody's happy. There
is a woman around in Jones street with lam
bago who deals with us, and one diay when I
forgot to put the assafetiia in the lotion she
sent around and threatened to prosecute us
for malpractice. The old man flxed IN The
next bottle SO that you could have smell il in
Asiatic Turkey when the cork was cut That
seemed TO calm her.
I tsDo the physicians approve Of that kind OF
thing ~
ksEo obg vo,, 1,now tho doctors al ,,or,, .h.ro
and share with tho ola man r. doo,,,r 500
\ woman going d die anvbow hs ,oads Ia.
nm with drngs and ,l,sn eoilec.s ,.an,r a Ia
,uer cent. aon,nission f,on Is AID - ,.han
WI, acciden,a,lv n,,t 4, - ,,,a,
ber sal,s am, 1 conyalesoo,,t na,,an, 1T.
/ tbe ooIflen stairs tbo dao,or lno,.s ,,o,,a.
HAN IL nah ! I f,,,. a,,,,,. ...tss.,. ~.
. ;nea IA. avas and ts,ls ia s,a,,,.,I,,.
| d;sea,e would he fata, froa ~ e,ss WI
have 4. new how hero xho ,,a1s. a,,o,, Can,
fatal bnnde,s 4 weet. Mayer oets ro,d !,
auvyharu,less drug when thare 4 doodl,