The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1880-10-13
Minstrel Jokes.
Some Of Them Put into a Head by Pro-
cess of Mental Trepanning.
washington Cor. chicago Times.l

Washington Cor. Chicago Times.
The other night the German minister, Kurd
Won Schlozer, accompanied by the retiring
Danish minister, Herr Lindenkrone, and the
Russian secretary of legation, occupied front
seats at minstrel performance. The Danish
minister has an American wife, formerly Mrs.
Moulton, and understands English very
thoroughly as it is generally spoken. The
Russian secretary is his equal in this regard.
The German minister, hard-headed very
matter-of-fact gentleman, has only moderate
use of the English language, sufficient to sus-
tain him in plain conversation or in follow
ing public speaker. Ho brought his pro-
found German intellect to bear upon the an
cient jokes of the minstrels, ably seconded by
his English speaking companions, but he
failed to comprehend why anybody should
laugh. A dissected joke is a very poor thing
at best, and so it is no wonder that the Ger
man minister gave up in disgust trying to fol-
fow the crazy attempts at fun made by the
chattering, nervous burnt-cork artists. This
is a fair sample of one of his struggles:
What" said the end man, with the usual
commissions, would be the most appropriate
epitaph for the tombstone Of Col. Robert G.
Ingersoll?' l iI.a4s aE
II give it up" was the reply of the master
of ceremonies.
"Robt rt Burns" was the answer.
The packed house roared at this, and then
trouble began between the Danish and Ger
man ministers.
Don't you see that" said Herr Linden
krone
"Nein," said the German minister.
"Well, you know who Robert G. Ingersoll
is?"
sYa!"
'You know he does not believe in hell. The
orthodoxy claim that MIR. lngersoll will lind
hot place when he dies Burns corresponds to
your verb bremen. To say Robert Burns
expresses the orthodox idea, and at the same
time makes very neat play upon the name Of
the Scottish poet"
Here this had hardly been explained when
it was asked why Casabianca stood upon the
burning deck. The answer was that it was be-
cause it was to no; too sit down. This involved
so much dark mystery that it took five min
utes to get even glimmering OF it into the
consciousness OF Bismarck s most trusted friend.
He wanted to know, in the first place, twas
fuer Elm Yankee was Casabianca, and he
never reached ally point where he saw
anything humorous. Great drops OF perspira-
tion stood out upon the DANISH minister's
white forehead, and he looked in the end as
disgusted and wearied as his FRIEND.
Very soon the Danish minister reached an
obstacle that was even too great for him.
Right upon the heels of the most ancient and
ridiculous of lconundrums one Of the end men
yelled out: "What is the difference between
these and those?" The audience laughed very
heartily as it had at everything preceding. The
Danish minister when asked to explain what
there was funny about this, declared that it
was beyond him. The party at koIce gave up
their study of English under difficulties, and
rushed over to the other theatre whore spec
tacular performance, fanked by ballet, had
language much easier OF comprehension.