The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1880-01-23
a LUCKY DIE.

"What the deuce ails me? Where am
I anyhow? Wherever I am, springs and
mattresses must be scarce, for | know
l am laid on some mighty hard sub
stance. Wonder if it is on a dissecting
board? Wonder if Tn dead? feel
mighty like it. Maybe 1 am stretched
ont ready for the doctors to carve me.
These were my fist thoughts, very
cheering, indeed, as 7 became conscious.
| could neither speak nor move; but
soon learned that could hear.
& A door opened, footsteps approached,
| felt cloth removed from my face,
and voice, which recognized as that
OF my intended father-in-law, said:
"He hasn't changed much, and his
companion, whose voice recognized as
Sowerby's, the undertaken, said lightly:
"1here's just where you are mistaken,
Mr.. Mullins he looks a cussed sight
better dead than alive, but how does
Priscilla feel about it? Take on much,
ell ?"
"Oh! no, just enough to appear well,
said the father Of my affianced, with
chuckle. "She never cared much for
Smith; twas his stamps that she fan
cied, my Priscilla is practical girl and
went in for his dimes his carriage and
greys, although at the same time l must
own that she was spooney on bald-pated
Howard, the artist. but he's poor as
Jobs turkey, as the saying is,
"Well, she can have him now for all
this poor cuss, cant she ?" said Sowerby.
beating a tattoo with his digits on my
chest.
II presume 50, but she will wait till
the year is up, for fear Of gossip, you
know"
''But who gets Lis money, seeing the
poor cuss has no relations ?" queried the
undertaken.
"Oh! that's all right. You see my
Priscilla is sensible girl. Before she
promised to marry him she had him to
make his will in her favor. Poor Smith
was rather sappy, you know; had moth
ing against him, however, although he
was deucedly homely, and such barn
door of mouth, always open"
"Well, =" SAID the cheerful voice Of the
undertaken, "his mouth is shut tight
enough now, I reckon; he'll never open
it in this world again. reckon his i'm
mortal part is now with the angels"
And my mortal part is also with the
angels, thought Ia fine pair of angels
1 felt indignant at their clumsy ridicule.
tried to shut my fist, but the devil q
shut was to it. / could do nothing but
listen. He then began to measure me
for my coffin. had heard that under.
takers whistled joyfully when they got Q
measure. I believed it to be only {
joke on the craft; but Sowerly actually
struck up the air "Pull Down the
Blinds" in a subdued thrilling whistle
while he measured me.
"a nobby casket and 100 hacks, eh
Mr.. Mullins? Must make big thing o
it. The cuss left lots of money, and re
member he was to be your Priscilla
husband Must make a splurge, Mr.
Muhins," said the worthy undertaken
with IN eye to his own pocket.
"Well, / don't mind if the coffin is
little nobby looking; but 100 hacks
& The deuce! just send one or two 70
the mourners, and the rest who come t.
attend the funeral can furnish their owl
rigs or hoof it. whieheyer suits them.
They covered my face again and lef
me to my own reflections. I had oftel
heard it remarked that meditation wa
. good for the soul, and this was the bes
chance / ever had of trying it.
+ An hour must have passed and til
! door was again opened. and two person
came, whispering along, to where lay
I and the voice Of my promised wife fe
on my ear.
I "I dread to look at him, Mr.. Howard
i, he was so homely while living, he mus