davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1880-04-22
The Rattle or the Bones.

How many bones in tho human tacef
Fourteen, when they're all in place.
How many homes in the human head1
Eight, my child, as I've often said.
How many u Iucs in tho human carr
Three in oich, and they help 10 hear.
How many bones in tho human spinei
Twenty six, like q climbing vine.
How many bones in the human chest
Twenty -four ribs, and two of the rest.
How many bones the shoulders bind!
Two I'm Zach - one before, one behind.
How many bones in the human armf
In each arm one; two in each forearm
How many bones in the human wrist
Eight in each, II none are missed.
How many bones in the palm of the hand
Five in each, with many aband.
How many bones in the fingers ten!
Twenty eight, and by joints they bend
How many bones in the human hipt
One in each like a dish they dip.
How many bones IN the human thigh
One in each, and deep they lie.
How many bones in the human kneesf
One in each, the kneepan, please.
How many bones in tho leg from the knee
Two in each we can plainly see.
How many bones in the ankle strongi
Seven in each, but none are long.
How many bones in the ball of the ioot'
Five in each, as the palms were put.
How many bones in the toes hall a score'
Twenty eight, and there are no more.
And now, altogether, these many bones fix,
And they count in the body, two hundred an,
six
And tasn We ha, g, In the human mouth
on upper and under, thirty-t teeth.
And now and then have bone should tlIinl
That forms on join. or to Ill up chink.
A sesamold bone or worm can we call,
Aud nov VIC may rest for we've told them all
-Indianapoiis Sentinel.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1880-04-22

There is a shepherds fold in the Eng
lish town OF Hastings. tt IL declared
that the local health officer, having
heard certain complaints. went to the
school in question, and found there two
children apparently suffering from star
vation. One, q girl of fourteen, was
found upon removal 20 the workhouse, to
weigh only thirty-five pounds, and her
toes are said to have been in such rot
ten state that IL was necessary 50 remove
them all. There were eight boarders In
the eafahIiahment.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1880-04-22

When old Mr. Higginsworth was
asked II he took newspaper. he rspIiei
thai "sInce our member OF Conaress has
stopped sending me the Congressional
Record don't take any. but j rurss /
kin gaz along without Il. II never
gIyes much news anyhow.--H. Rasl
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1880-04-22

A certain painter was Dragging Of his
wonderful command of color to a friend
ono day. His friend did not seem 10
take 1t quite Hllin. why" exclaimed
the painter, "do you know that there
are but three painters in the world, SIR
who understand colore" And who
are theyP" at last asked the friend.
Why, sir, am one, and--and--and--
and forget tLsn1 of theother .wot'
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1880-04-22

Two sisters OF Glasgow rot mad Il
plumber and threw him out of Tho
ilth story window But no got even
with the sisters. He charged them
double time from tho minute Re left he
window until be struck the sidawalk.-
Norristosca Herald.
Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1880-04-22

Everything IN nature indulges In
amusement. The lightning plays. the
wind whistles, the thunder rolls, the
snow flies, the waves leap and the fields
smile. Even the buds shoot and the
rivers run.
, 1880-04-13
CROP-NOTES.
ILLINOIS.

spsclal Dtspa.eh 70 TIE Chfeayo Tribune.
WAr.AaA, Knox Co., April 12.-Ninter
wlrat not rs good M Inst year, Freezing,
tliuwh!g, aid open winter Inns killed good
.lcnl. Spring wheat NIL sown md I'll good
shape. None for shipping. Oats nil sold.
Corn all solt.,
spseta! Di.patth to The Caieaoo Tribune
WAslrnrrN, Woot1fartl Co.. April H.
Wheat nnd onts ail sown. Farmers begin
ming tn pow for corn. Fruit prospects good.
Spsslat Dtsptfeh Ia The CAttapo 7'ribuns.
PocAl1oSrAs, l}o,l CO., April la.-Wl,ent
prospects cnuhl to lsip. Farmers holding
l,acl; corll. Apnle prospects, good. Peaches
III full hl0ohl. Tu5 unrty tn Iudgn fuirly of
the prospects f0r snail fruits.
Spfciai WsiMieh tu The Chicago Trtbune.
CANrUS, FnituM Co., April 11.-Sprlng sectl-
!ng .tbbut. tlnnr. M WHEAT Tor sltpMrht.
Twtl-t(larlS Ut the corn vet In farmers cribs.
Frrit prospects Of alI Kinds good. Acreage
Df Wt1ltEr wheat double lust year.
Spersal ptsuseh 10 Jhf Chteuen Tribune.
.'NES1A, Clny Cn., April :le.-tpfntur wheat
hooking finely. .Acrc.lEe double any previous
crop. Flhx wilt be sUWn freely.
SnteLH Utsnttth u The Citettpo Tribune.
DEcATt't III, April la.-Tllc winter wheat
crop Il! 1iacon County WIS never more prOill-
Istns ilinh ut ttls Season Ut tile year. This IT.
cent SHOWS sli,ti rain !,nvg preserved 1t from
threAtenutl danger, n1Al the farmers are Jubl-
IuMt over the line prospects. Nearly two
thirds of tlie plpwnble land III the cntlnty IL
~ wheat this year, md tho Yield will bc sln,-
uly enormous,
, 1880-04-13

inhabitants Of the Stale, II cout,I not dispose
Of TINT right except by express authority,
WtilrIt exl,reas authority WIS not to 'e found
me Supreme. Court tnolx tho latter view.
II held tint thon' wis mt MI explicit rn,Yer
Rlyril by the Legislature In tlM. general net
which would sustain the p,Sttton TIM, thp
[;Et Of tt's sl.y !" sn tn' ", %ilG 1,st Wsst
lla't!! llntl brcH cut or hy, tho nrt1lllh1lse
PArk tnn1.lifsslnnrrs. II rcfcrral 10 tic other
c.'srs citea BY ti. Su'il'. Ic, ro1lc % theso
Tug existemco or s1en H. % %sxtra1,r'ttssary,
ill., !aw llias r,1ok'S'lil"s e Il np Whit ro o!to
Will iI!sGfigCnty deny, md Wat WIS not tle-
tla IT, te argument OF ts as ns', tl,, ,i1t s
street frem tie city aInl give 1t to tho Park
Thu ie9islaiuro of 1872 ncsep,lng tl,lss
opin!a1 M g.as law, mt only "tti;l atts,npt,n.
ii, i.', in tlle elrar'st manner, HIys tle rity
tn. power ttl surrender, mud tho l'1rli Calh"
MIssioncys thu luwrr 10 tnke, raR!latr. s'siit-
tr0', nnti Improve nny rhbltu street !aMll!ly
designated t. ct,l,tieet tho parks with the
ticn. .SmEtl,'s nIIni0n Inns but 0Mc 'ncaN-
Ing, md that |. ihat tile net Ut 1s'tl Is uIca-
sti,utiulM1, a.,tl hetlce void. i that a true,
how + Il psslbe to s!'stMii ~, te ya;!a!y M M
complying will whfcl, onrcIty lAs beell bea,l-
tilrA md ,l,atlc pleasant?
IlpW hu arrives Mt this conclusion slO not
sec. a city charter IL ilot. .cnltrAct. lly
I'LL tic authorities, municipal corporations
owe their artelf mid derive their powers aiih
rights wholly from tllg LcEts!!it,rr. 1t
hrGatlies tht9 them the brgAtsl uf life, with.
nut which they ca,lnot exfst. As It srcnte!l
nbr.' ae md constroi TlS I.eeislat,r. migiit
by Il single net sweep frHlll existence nll tito
municipal corporations OF tic Statc. There
Is n0 limitation OH this right 50 fnr ~ the
corporations themselves nrp rpcn,tcrriull. They
a.c tho r'ere tenant; nt will q thu LseslS,
City OF Clifton vs.. Cedar Rapids, n Iowa,
The Legislature created tho 1'ar1t Board.
After granting specific pOwers, tllo following
general pnwcr ii conferred:
And generally III regard to said pnrks. bonle-
wards, md why's they eh!lll paRscss I'LL tho power
possessed l,y tho Common (:o,iuu II t,Ie CITY
ai,t' strcets In sattl city.
Tho people BY n general vote approved
this HrNHL Df power. 49,.
It folnws tint hy the general Park .uct tho
"Wcst Chicngn park Commissioners" wer0
III authority viii: lilo City Of CIlicagu, having
lrowcr to a'g,Iatt, Improve, md govern the
innds subject to their Jurisdiction; md that
such jurisdiction Is exclusive Ut md silpel-
seties tint of the city.
IN 1870 thu Legislature saw tit to give to
this, Enartl tile right tn these connecting
hnnIcyAnls. thus taking away from tho city
s1icli connecting boulevnr!s ntltl comforting
these, rights aud powers npoll the l'arli
Uoard. E.AMLS q. NALl,
aH In SutlG street.
, 1880-04-13
MILWAUKEE, APPOINTMENTS.

SPffIQ{ 1JE1VIEt7E 10 JNE ENltHfV 7FIUHHfK
MILWAUKEE, April l1.-ft In authoritative
ly announced tt,-.lny TINT Mayor-clcct i'lnwn
will nppnlnt tn the oillcc Ut Chief of Police
Mr.. W. w. Watkins, 1, gentleman Will to he
worth quarter of II million If tlol'nrs. The
announcement Is surprising, ns Mr.. Watkins
has long been known only rs Il retired cap.
itultst~ i1e i,,s NM excellent Wnr record, M!M
stands high stWIallY niul commercially: lie
independent, Is 10 be retained III Health
UfllGcr a,nl +. S. l1lotlgctt rs Commissioner
Of Public Works. LIpl,ert, win WIS rt,nnved
by the present Democratic Mnyor, WILL be
reinatAtetlns Chluf Engineer Ut the Fire De
pArttnGnl.
, 1880-04-13
IOWA.
Special DupafeA To 7hs C.ftapo 1f1buHs.

Dow CRY, Crawford Co., April 1a,-
Spring wheat MI sown, Acrcuge Increased
70 per cent, Very Iittlu wheat lett for ship
neMt. M onts on l,ts,ns. Acreage Ut flax
ivo tin,us as great at ~. 1'l,ree-fonrths OF
tic cnrn Murkcted. Farmers hulllng re-
Spfctai Hl.patth 10 M tAlraga Tribune.
CEnAnE FALLS, l,larkl,awk Co., April 12,-
En,uutl wot hlnl heavy. 6uns WHEAT suwN.
Forty l,er ccnt less will be prt III than last
AueraM Of UAts viii bv Increased w pur cent
O Or lust year.
, 1880-04-13
THE ORDER JUSTIFIED,

GRAND PACIFIC IloTEI. CHICAGO, April
i'll sce In your paper of to-tlny II summary
Of my letter to Gen. S. u. Atkins, nntl also
tho comment of TIC "Sta'wart" of' Spring.
field, III. Gen. tirn,it's order referred to WINS
General, fully Justified by the conditions Ut
tho time. 1t wils Dbeyett, ny It shuuld have
been, md n0 criticism Of Its ,prnprtcty isls
ever buen nude by lit. $. X. llUELUUT.
, 1880-04-13
AI1SS0uIlI.

6ptetal Dlsratth .o TAs CAteaeo Tribune
OzAItK, Christian Co., April 1a.-Wl,eat
Is b0Uming. Never sAw 10 gootl prospect.
llnyu not seen really bad-l0oklnS field Ut
wheat this spring. Arreage inerensed 70 per
8pretat Rhpateh to TA* Chleapu Tribune.
:, JEEpElsoX Cry, Colo O.. April a.
Winter wl.tnt looking better tl,all last spring
Aereago - IUr cent More ttltl, last ycnr.
Thrco-fuWrt'1s nf thu corr! laarketel. Pros
poets for all kinds Ut, fruit splendid. Look
Tor large crop OF i,encllea.
, 1880-04-13

Epsttdl Dtspatth to 1hs Chicago Tribune.
nEATlHcE, Gage Co., April lA-No In
crUase III acreage Of spring wheat. Our MILLS
will grind all tho surplus wheat. curn
mustly sol,l. Shall ship ten car-toads ct
cuttlo fr0l, this point every week.
, Special DttIssteh to Thu Chteaoo Ittb.4Hs.'
FALLS Clrr, Richardson Co., April, a.
Spring wheat all g0wl,. Acreage Increased
a3h uer cent. No spring wheat 10 ship from
here Ills spring., Fally Init tho corn crop of
l6tu III hnllus Of farmers yet,
, 1880-04-13
FROSTED FRUIT.

CINCINNATI, o., April ta.-Frlttt through
out Southern Ohm. 1nttIann, utltl Kentucky
las brrn considerably injured by tho frost "f
tho Inst three nights. III sumo Ut tllo largest
Kentucky Ienc1l-Drelnrsls large fires were
kent burill,ig eaGll cold night.
, 1880-04-13

8ptttat DupastA 10 The Chttdgo Tribune.
NEWCASTLE; Henry Cn., April IT,
Winter wl,cat looking nearly rs well NJ lust
yenr. Acreage ,nurl, larger. Font-flfths. Of
ille corn marketed. Ft1llt prospects good.
, 1880-04-13
vvcishing nm Islcri,nnt without Scales.

An lntun writer rntnttA M interesting aurc-
dot, concerning RhH}eL. tho rntlicr ur ttio ifst
vino lived ut ,ltIout llo beginning Of the sevt.-
tpenth century. On me uecna!u!I IL certain hfHli
oIltltsl n.e VOW tlAt llg wolllil distribute to
the pur tho weight Of llA owit elephant III silver
Iuney; bllt tho great difficulty ..t III first prc-
scented itself WIS tic lnnle Uf usGertllfnE wlmt
this wu!E.,t really w,ts: ai.d MI tho learner! md
oret Il, win Ii eatrlirt machine ut sufficient
pnwcrto wctEI, tho eIcpIans AT length, II II
snitl TINT SIM ce came forY.lrI md suggested u
plan, wI,icl. wts simple, anil yet inEGnR lii tho
highest tleErpc. lle eltspti tho tiHWlellly Anl-
mni tn lM ta'ndnetrd NlonY Il stnlfc. slkcuiy
1iAt bot ti,nlntl bult: and tl.etl, hurtnE narkml
on the bfmt the hight, to which ITO water
aaW,' te atarrwI,s @ 1 tat MT. ~,l sto!,s sut,.
stItite In sufficient lt,utty tt hula tho btt to
tic sa,ue linz. Tho sttInt!s wera tim takrn tn
tho sculcg, ,liltl thus, IT. tho hirtitzeent Ut tho
CURT, wis .ysecrtaiutu lhe tr,iu weight OF tho
elephunt, 7"
, 1880-04-13

Special .Disnaleh to Ths Chicago 7ftauHe
VALLEY CRY, barnes Co., April H.
Grourl about ready for seed. Acreage will
be Increased 100 per cent over 1b10. estI-
mats tllat there will bo aho,,t rs 900 acres
s0wn II. this county. this. sirllg. Weather
still cold ami seasoli late, but any ti.ne this
muntll Will be early enough for good crops.
, 1880-04-13
WISCONSIN,.

spsela, DnpaseA 10 ia. eatssse 4stssns >.
kENosllG, April .la.-spstn. wheat oil
sowu. Gru,lud iM excellent condition. Small
, 1880-04-13
TO flIsNT-1fOGtREM


"ckE NfHf-1.0f1tINMeIs
fItl NENT-4TTi WEST Aft}ElNIE.S'r, t,DtSEIk OI
l. l.cAvtt, erpAht bl[Na. ~: III HubIlsF-rt-. Iarr
frame, hc lot, tAtt M WGrt MHrrtte-%t, #t1ng-frnn
ilins bnfnl. 81, II. 4. DsitultS, ~ lA salse.st
thIn1n !. ~. -.--
, 1880-04-13

l)AitTTEu yAhrElt-WlVtttl tlIAu OIL UrwAhI.s
ID uye.t IN ybry pr,tttAbtu. Straight, H. l{M4tY
Lus,AGbs. Address u Il. r.ltauv' uhtv,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29
The Wonderful Accomplishments OF a
Frisco Paint Singer.

"Do you--ahem'-do you ever
print any art items in your paper Y
asked rather seedy looking man
with long hair, a slouch hat, and
paint on his fingers, softly edging
into the Posts inner sanctum the
other day.
The managing editor glanced
savagely up from his MONDAY sand
wich, and after evidently repress'
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

The young people had just set
tied down in their new house and
had engaged very capable ser
want. At the third breakfast the
husband said, "My darling, why
are all these hairs in the hash =
She replied, "Peto it is only q
misplaced switch."-New York
Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

An exuberant youth halls a sup
posed acquaintance on the street
with, "Hello, Joe," but finding his
mistake, adds, 80, excuse me;
thought you were another man 7
Laconic stranger answers: 81 am
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A newspaper commenting on the
fact that farmer nearly lost his
life by sinking in quagmire, adds,
"Men who do not subscribe for a
paper must expect to DO sucked in
every now and then"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29
ApvYpTIsrNe uLrvs

business Cards, one yoar, one dollar for .v.~,
line '
Local Notices, ten cents per line each in.sruoa
and ell notices continued Tor thrse rnonths :,
longer discount Of IS per cent
Advertisements unaccompanisd BY written %
verbal directions will be published three m mir I.
Advertisements, under contract, ordered ont hs .
fore expiration Of time will be charged full rst..
opapor discontinued until all arrearsg.s are
paid, except ~ the option Of the publisher
Transient advertisements must Be paid in I'd /.
vance
BS5- Terms, Cash. payable quarterly
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A bachelor at banquet in New
castle, England, gave the following
toast 1.-THE women and coal Of
Durham county-oh how desolate
would the fireside be without them"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

"Would you like to look through
the big telescope p asked one girl
of another. To which the latter
replied: "No, I'd rather look
through keyhole. Harvard Lam
noOn
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

1t is q mistake not to marry
Philadelphia Sunday Item. 1t is
usually miss-take to marry, broth
er.--Boston Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

"Tiers, tiers, idle tiers as the
actor said when he saw the rows Of
empty benches before him.-Mara-
thon Independent.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A Boston Bank advertises that
it will place money anywhere by
telegraph. All right; place four
thousand with us. Our address is
Rockland, Me.-Rockland Courier.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

"He's an honest young man" !"
said the saloon-keeper, with an ap-
proving smile, she sold his vote to
pay his whisky bill."-New Ro-
chelle Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

ing a desire to add the long haired
party to his visnds, replied in the
affirmative.
Because" continued the young
man, scowling critically at a cheap
chrome on the wall, "because | !
thought if you cared to record the
progress of real, aesthetic art cul-
ture on this coast, you might send
your art critic around to my stu
dio to take some notes"
"Might, eh I" said the editor, be-
tween his chews.
eyes sir. For instance, there's
mammoth winter storm land
scape I've just finished for Mr..
Mudd, the Bonanza king. It's
called "A Hailstorm in the Adiron-
dacks,' and a visitor who sat down
near it the other day caught sore
throat in less than fifteen minutes.
The illusion is so perfect, you un-
derstand. Why, ! had to put in
the finishing touches with my uls-
ter and Arctic overshoes on."
Don't say!"
Fact, sir; and then there's q
little animal gem l did for Gov.
Glerkins the other day-portrait
of his Scotch terrier, Snap. The
morning it was done, q cat got in
to the studio, and the minute it
saw the picture il went through
the window sash like a ten inch
she'll"
"Did eh I"
eyes; and the oldest thing
about it was that when next look
ed at the canvass, the dogs hair
was standing up all along his back
like q porcupine. Now, how dc
you account for that I"
"Dunno."
at just beats me. When the
Governor examined the work, he
insisted on my painting on a post
with the dog chained to it. Said
he didn't know what might hap
PEN"
"Good scheme" growled the
President maker.
"Wasn't it, thought My best
hold, however, is water views. You
know George Brumley, how ab-
stractsd he is sometimes. Well,
George dropped in one morning
and brought up before an eight by
twelve view of the San Joaquin
River, with a boat in the foreground.
I'm blessed if George didn't alb
sent mindedly take Of his coat and
step clear through the canvas try
ing to jump into the boat-thought
he'd go out rowing, you know"
"Have they carried out that
ourneyman with the small pox r
said the editor, winking at the
brennan, who had come in just
hen to swear for copy.
"Small poxi That reminds me
,f q realistic historical subject I'm
'ngaged on now, entitled The
Plague in Egypt had only
four of the principal
igures when last Tuesday the JAM
tor, who sleeps in tho next room,
vas taken out to the hospital with
he most pronounced case Of lepro-
y you ever saw, and this morning
he boy who mixes the paints be-
an to scale off like a slate roof.
don't really know whether to
sep on with the work or not
low does it strike your
at strikes me that you'd better
ide," said the un@sthetic moldsr
public opinion, grufliy.
Don't care to send a reporter
ound, thenl"
"No, SIR
"Wouldn't like to give an order r
" q life-sized Gutenberg Dis
,vering the Printing Press eh :"
"Nary an order"
"Don't want a seven by nine
roup Of the staff done in oil or
"No," said the editor, as he r
rain lowered himself into the "
spths of leader on the Roumsn-
N imbroglio, "but if you care to
,uch up two window frames, some |
ssk legs, and the fighting editors b
ack eye for four bits and a lot OF :"
,mic exchanges, you can sail in"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A writer in the Pail Mall Ga
zetto says "that few persons pro-
baby, as q rule, sleep sounder or
enjoy so much undisturbed reposs
as night watchmsn.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

When Adolphus told his old
maid aunt she was "fixed up just
like a book" probably he meant
that she looked primmer than
usual.-Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

The man who is never on time
usually carries a large watch
New York Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A banana skin belongs to the
lower creation. That is to say,
it will lower q man to the side
walk with wonderful celerity.-
Boston Globe.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

Noodle-a person who hasn't
sufficient backbone to be a fool
San Francisco Wasp.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

4 we'll fed hog reused up in his sty,
And dropped regretful tear
"The beautiful snow has come he said,
And Staying will soon be here"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

Il am q man of few words,
said Prendergast. "True enough" /"
replied Fog, "true enough; but
you never tire Of repeating them
Boston Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

Tall soft hats supply a long felt
want.-New Orleans Picayuue.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

Young clergyman at clerical
meeting: 81 merely throw out the
idea" Old minister: swell, l
think that is the best thing you
can do with IL.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A medical writer asks: "Does
position affect sleepi" Well, rath-
er; if you're hung up by your
trousers on spiked fence, you
won't sleep soundly.-Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

The balloonist's homs is one
flight up.-New York News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

Some men are called mufFs be-
cause they are used to keep flirt's
hand in.-Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

When is a carpet like q good
notel When it is taken up.-Eng-
lish American.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

A humorous article-a baby with
the rash.-Lowell Citizen.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29
Flint & Pere Marquette r. H.

,cno shorte,t. quickest, and most reliable rouse
T., III groYn Detroit, Toledo, Cleveland, Oinonh'
,.i to unS sa',;naw ana Bay City.
ha'h cue 'aorxorAsr SOUTH AID WEST.
-. ,iDano daily, except Sunday, oy Alpsn"
Il IN ~ City line of steamers at 7;Oo A. m
eo1NG SoRrH-wEsr. -,v-.-
part Huron Bay City and Night
Accom-. Saginaw Mail! Express
..-------; ~ - i0p m
Toledo, Ly. ahnm 1910
Detroit, - 49, oIs n m ~ am
Raw City, Ar II 40 a IN @ : 10 I W
GOING soUTH-EAsr.
-------------------T Detroit Detroit hight
Express. Mail. Express,
-----------Ty77 .,--7-.,--- w loan 00p m 10 90 p N.
bay IVY Ar.Iil 10 a m 10 80 p m 8 90 m
Toledo ,-
Drawing room cars on morning and evening
trains between Bay City ana Detroi'' 'Ah~o
res only p cents. ,.,- ..;uA. ,u....A =,
s,t,,,dSv An other trains daily except sunday
eaVu'""'' SANFORD keller, sup't
y. MOUSSE, General Ticket Agent.
D. l. AF. FLETCHER,
Ticket Agent, Alpena, Mich.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29
northwestern Grand Trunk
R. R.

formerly Chicago & Lake Huron
Condensed Timetable.
September 2sth, 1879.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

Accommodation trains leave LApeer, east l:o6
p m, 1915 y. m west, 500 y. m, ll:lo 7. m.
Flint, east, li:Q0 a. m, $50 p. M; west, $40 a.
a through Pullman palace sleeping coach run
hom Lansing 10 Buffalo on trains passing Flint
at7l7 p IN, and Lspesr st sos p. m.
CHAs. h. PECK, il. FUNNEL, w. Y. DAVIS,
Genl Manager, Supt. Genl. Tkt.Agt.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1880-12-29

PHYSICIAN, SURGEON, GYNfCoLoGIsT
&c, Late Asst. Surgeon L. 5. Army; Examining
Surgeon for L. s. pensioners, and all the princi-
/ pal Life Insurance Cos. Residence and Office on
/ Second St., nearly opposite the Union House.