Litchfield enquirer., 1880-07-08
CLIPPINGS.

- .---..- CLIPPINGS.
 The greatest curiosity which Chicago has to show her visitors is piece of unmortgaged ground. S4~@F S~r~~@- ~--]f
 The demand for chairs that Washington sat in is keeping the furniture makers very busy. --. -l - ,----
 According to the. London Truth, the fash ionable age in London just now is from twen- ty-four to thirty. Sweet seventeen is out of the running t !
 "If have ever used any unklnd words, l Hannah" said Mir. Smiley effectively, "I take them all back" "Yes, I suppose you want to use them oyer again." was the not very soothing reply. ,.. !
 "Did you know," said cunning Yankee to a Jew, "that they hang Jews and donkeys to- gether in Poand?' ''Indeed then it is well that you and are not there," reterted the Jew.
 Some men are always giving themselves away. Even long years of experience haven't taught the Detroit Free Press man better than to remark: ''It is hard work to tell ripe cher ries from green ones in dark night."
 A lady writes asking for poetical name for "a picturesque, tumble-down, an tique- looking farm" Call it Lalla Rookhery. You couldn't get Moore antique or romantic nsme than that, - '.- '~t '-5 .!
 A Philadelphia lady who never spanked her boy hard enough to hurt him recently hung in her sitting-room the Illuminated motto: Whatsoever thy hand f1ndeth to do, do it with thy might" That boy reformed on the spot
 His companions could not understand why he turned up his nose when they said Smith had some redeeming qualities, but they under stood it on learning that he was clerk in his l fathers pawnshop. We met farmer, day or two ago, who was so hard pushed that he was on his way to pawn his hoe. We told him we were sorry to see his case SO hopeless. "Hopeless ]" he ex- claimed; "far from it. You know the old motto, Hoe pawn, hope ever."
 ''See here, Georgie," said a fond mamma to her little son, as they walked on the beach, ''what lot of nice little round stones." "Yes." grumbled Georgia, as he cast search ] ing glance around, 'and not blessed thing l to throw lem at!" Some little girls in Brooklyn Sunday school were studying the history of David, the passage for the day being that which describes | the shepherd boys victory over Goliath. The teacher asked the question, "Now can any of you little girls tell me who killed the giant?" Quick as thought one of the smallest respond ed, 'Jack."
 He came into the sanctum with large roll | of manuscript under his arm, and said very politely 'I have little trit1e here about the sunset yesterday, which was dashed off by friend of mine, which 1 would like inserted if you have room; just insert it yourself, re- piled the editor. gently pushing the waste bas- ket toward him.
 A young man of meek demeaner said on entering church at Columbus, Ohio, that he was deaf, and would therefore like front seat. The sextonsaccommodated him, and he sat during the sermon with his hand behind his ear. But during the subsequent prayer he | was detected reaching into the contribution box. aud that explained his choice of seat. There was once remarkable dog in San Antonio. It knew its masters step and his habits and would never bite him. His owner loved him and said he would not take $500 for him. One fight his owner came home perfectly sober and three hours earlier than usual. The dog not having been notified of this change in the programme misteok him for an intruder, and bit him in nineteen places.
 Professor of Greek, who is out riding with
 
 drives into stream by the roadside: professor remarks that there is evidently some weighty obstruction which prevents the horse from get | ting his. head down to drink, and s:tys that he will make observations with view of detect- ing the difficulty. Suddenly he exclaims, "Ah perceive" and proceeds to unbuckl le the crupper.
 They were walking arm in arm Aus the street, and just ahead of them was & woman in splendid dress. The setting sun was gliding the western heavens and throwing beautiful crimson glow all over the earth. He said in subdued tone, ''Isn't it lovely?" well, don't know" was the reply of his fair companion; 'I don't think the trimming matches very well and it doesn't fit her bit. ;" He shuddered
 The man who, while on hunting and fish Ing expedition at Saratoga, receives letters from his wife, via the wilds of Northern Yer mont, where he is supposed to he, now ob- serves that none of his questions about home affairs are answered in them, and though the dates and postmarks are all right he can't help wondering what sort of fellow his wife is flirting with at Newport, while she is at home, all alone, and snxiously longing for her dear hubbys return.
 One afternoon there was crowd of excited darkies in an alley near The Galveston News office gathered around two negro boys who had clinched each other and were fighting away for dear life on the ground. There was 1 one negro man present and he urged the com batants not to give up. 'Gouge him in de eye, Bill ?" ''Sam, if you give in I'll tan Ter hide for yer. If you whips Bill Ise gota quarter fer yer"
 A well-dressed gentleman stopped and said to the negro man You ought to be ashamed of yourself to encourage those boys to fight p
 ''Why, Lor,' boss" twas the response, dems my own chidrsns." n
 The suobbishness of the newly rich in 'Fris- co has become a we'll worn theme, but we think the following anecdote tout Herods Herod" in snobocracy. Among, the scqusint- ances of Taylor street magnate was repre- sentative of the ancient state of Virginia, who prided herself upon her F. F. ", inwardly considering she was the one who paid the con- piiment m calling, and was not the one com plimeDted in being received. But one day, soon after the ascendency of Mob Hill aFistec- racy, she was amazed, on presenting her card at the Taylor street mansion, to ind thes serS- ant inspect her from head to foot, and then re- turn her card with the rsmark: ''My mist ess's orders are very strict, mum sorry can't admit you to day, but we don't receive pee- pie twice in the same costoom." Another resi- dent of the same locality, when revising her visiting list on her husbands sudden accession to some unexpected bonanza, struck from it the names of those ladies she had previously known who did not own carriages, remarking :: "One must draw the line somewhere. What was her delight, short time afterward, at seeing drawn up before her door the carriage of a lady whose acquaintance she was more than anxious to cultivate but her annoyance and chagrin was unbounded at receiving from her servants lipsthe message: Mfrs. Elites compliments, and she has sent her carriage to call on Mrs. Cash" PILES PILES PILES l.-Do you know what it is to suffer with Piles If you do, you