Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1880-10-15
Domestic Infelicities.


have hardly failed to discover the fr;v-
olousness and utter want of excuse for
the great bulk of the petty auarrels
between man and wife. 1t all the bus.
bands and wives, when they reach the
other world, are permitted to look back
in review OF their past lives they will
bow in deep humiliation over the trivial
causes which led to long periods Of
alienation and. unhappiness on earth.
and will mourn in unavailing regret
over all the joys that were missed and
the marital bliss lost. Then the little
mole-hills of provocation that once
leomed up in excited Imagination az
mountains of menace and hateful in
centive will shrink into microscopic
proportions and regret and shame will
almost be lost in wender and amaze.
ment that human Judgment could be
so weak as to wreck 80 much of lifes
happiness upon shoals to reach which
the human barque had to be steered
out OF its natural course into dark and
repulsive channels.
Perhaps as truthful and yet unfortu.
nate an expression as ever became cur
rent in English literature was that
coined by Charles Dickens in excusing
his separation from his wife. He called
it "incompatibility of temperament.
Perhaps it was in his case and yet it is
quite possible, if not probable, that he,
too, with thousands, wrecked marital
bliss, when it might have been piloted
upon less tempestuous seas. Bs that
as it may. the phrase "incompatibility
of temperament has passed into pop
ular use as too convenient, bu. fash.
ionable excuse for that which in COM
mon parlance is nothing more than u
family quarrel.
It is noticeable fact that these do
mestic Quarrels are seldom eccasiopsfA
by any question Of any importance. II
is not known that dispute over the
authorship of the "Junius letters" or
the probability OF the moon being in
habited; or problem in geometry; or
protoplasmic discussion ever divorced
married couple. Perhaps such an
instance may be of record but the pub
lie is not aware of it. But almost any
neighborhood can furnish data of d.
vorce, or q separation, or periods Of
GOODNESS and unhappiness in married
life which sprung from some insignifi-
trivial indictments. The momentous
question whether tea should be first
soaked in cold water to make the leaves
unfurl before sleeping, or should be
saturated with hot water. has agitated
many family; whether lime should be
used in making soft soap, or whether it
should be banished from the leach &C.
cording as their respective mothers
practiced the art, has made enemies of
more than one husband and wife;
whether Mrs. Ferguson said catnip tea
was good for the baby's collie when it
was complicated with the ague, or
whether she eaid it was not good under
such circumstances. has split into war
ring factions more than one household.
If life can he looked back upon with
so many regrets for wasted opportuni-
ties of loving and being loved, and
building up characters resplendant with
all the domestic virtues, how natural it
is for the disappointed human heart TO
sigh over the past and long to live it NJ
over again. How much better each life
would be if it could only be lived over
again!
But would it? Put it to the crucial
test. You need not wait for eternity 10
do that. The opportunity may yet be
yours. II you have wife try the ex-
pertinent now. If home and husband
is still yours try it. II the good wife
declares that black is white, when you
arc satisfied it is black, let it 60; pass
it by. What boots it, anyhow, whether
black or white? Perhaps, after all, the
side she sees is black, and the side you
see is white, like the famous story OF
the knights who quarreled over the
signboard by the roadside.
And whether 1t is black or white
neither of you will care . continental
cent when you reach the other world,
or only year hence. Perhaps cen
the morrow will dissipate your inter-
est in it. Then don't pay the inexpress-
IDLY dear price OF domestic joys lost, for
that mere notion that is not worth ore
breath of angry dispute. Change the
subject and forget it, aud perhaps thus
cheat the divorce lawyers out of fee
and Satan out of q job. The ordinary
sample of domestic infelicity has about
the slimmest and most fragile founda-
ton of any class OF human unhappi-
ness that has ever been discovered
HaUkeye.
THINGS 1T Would BE FUNNY TO SEE.
Soap free from I've, and politician
OF similar character.
A patent medicine that wasn't war
ranted q dead shot for snything, from
corns to consumption.
A rose without thorn and woman
without fault.
A tarpaulin stout enough to keep ~:
rain from soaking through the backSo ~
our milkman's COWS.
A poor plumber rich newspaper
man.
A man who can rap eternal smash out
of his favorite bunion while making
tight croquet and still keep the air.
brake on his tongue.
The man who wasn't always able ana
willing to give an editor a few pointers
in the newspaper business.
A doctor who hadn't believed al
along that Tanner would come out all
right.
A bald headed man who never lost
hi tamnar