The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1880-03-26
An Arcndsan revenge.

"Depend upon it, my dear sir. there
is system of compensation: ], for ex
ample, occupy position in the country
beyond my talents, willie you possess
talents that are considerably above what
is necessary-ahem-to q person OF
your condition OF life."
This amazing speech was addressed
to me con6denti~lly in the smoking
room of our common club one night, by
Mr.. -Dicke, after we had
dined together for the first time. 1t
was late in August: the club was emp
ty, and had invited him to join tables,
though knew him to be an ass, rather
than to dine alone The Lad man may
take solitary meal without moral
damage, and even to the public advan-
tage, Stree the custom is unwhoIesome,
and tends to shorten life but to the
good man it is harmful. His thoughts
constant as the needle to tie pole to
what is pure and good, are naturally
attracted to himself. and his benevolent
actions, his excellent motives, his whole
blameless career, pass in review before
his eyes, and he becomes seltconscious
aud selEcomplacent. Rather than run
the risk of this, having ordered my
own modest repast, looked up st
Dornoway-Dicke,w who, with his glass
painfully fixed IN his eye, was scanning
the same ''limited carte" for the day,
in doubt (as | guessed) about the
French dishes, and observed, "Shall we
dine together?'' and he had replied
courteously, "Charmed, am sure"
AS matter of fact Mr.. Dornoway-
Dicke was man not easy to charm it
was rot in genius Though up to that
date don't think it ever had tried III
to 10 SO; and believe even Beauty her
self would have failed in the attempt, 1n-
less she had had title to back her
Mr.. Dicke's weakness was for lord;
a very common ore. of course, but in
his case unusually pronounced. His
compensation was studded with titles as
the ornament is with stars and lie
was III respect to them what Mr.. Carr
lyle. in relation to spiritual things, calls
''terribly at ease in Zion;'' that is, he
was shockingly familiar with ear,s and
viscounts, while as to barone;s, he would
refer to them by tteir Christian names.
To say that his views upon all matters
were commonplace would have been
tiatteriug to his Intelligence they were
conventional to sublimity.
"Ghost stories are absurd" argues
Coleridge, ''becanse, though men tell
us they have had such All experience, if
a man did really ever see what he actul-
believed to be ghost, i1iocy would at
once supervene." But firmly believe
that Dornoway-D -Dicke would have seen
ghost without the least injury to his
intellectual powers; not because he was
already All idiot, but Independently of
that because SO unconventional subs
Ject as the supernatural had never en-
tered his mind. If the ghost had title,
then, indeed, an impression might lave
been made but it would have been
produced by his temporal, no; his spirit
ual, lordship. In all matters which ex-
ercise the human mind, from theology
to American bowls, he took not the
fain'est interest but had been Inform
ed-and warued-that npon the sub
ject OF the dignity and position of the
Dornowoy-DIcke family he could, aid
would, he very diffuse if you were not
careful. He was a man, IN shcrt, to
nod to but not to speak with, unless
the means of escape were handy. Sul',
late in August at London club one
cannot afford to be particular and
having such strong moral reasons for
not dining alone, had to dine with
Dornoway- -Dicke.
There was one circumstance, how
ever, which really did attract me tow
ard this gentleman and made me wish
for closer acquaintance. 1t was
much debated question in the club
whether he wore wig or not, and
wanted to solve it. If he did so (tor
even after dining with him I was not
sure) they were the best wigs that ever
were. ] say wigs, because he must
have had lots of them, for his hair was
sometimes short and sometimes longs
and sometimes just as It ought to be in
the case OF a fashionable young gentle
man of fifty-four, for there was this
disadvantage about the distinguished
position of the Dornoway-Dicke family,
that, being IN the peerage-thongh it
must be confessed in a very remote and
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