The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1880-07-02
THE POET AND THE EDITOR.
BY MAX ADELER.

While Col. Bangs, editor of the ar
gus, was sitting in his Office one day, a
man whose brow was clothed with thun-
der entered. Fiercely Selling chair,
he slammed his hat on the table, hurled
his umbrella on the floor, and sat down.
| Are you the editor?" he asked.
| eyes"
"Can you read writing?"
"Of course. !"
Read that, then " he said, thrusting
at the Colonel an envelope with an in
scription on it.
"B said the Colonel, trying to
spell it.
"That's not B it's an S." said the
man.
IS? Oh, yes, I see. Well, the
words look a little like Salt for Din
ner, /" said the Colonel.
Ono, sir, replied the man, g nothing
of the kind. That's my name-Saml
Fl. Drummer. knew you couldn't read.
[ called to see about that poem of mine
you printed the other day, on the Sur
cease of Sorrow"
81 don't remember it," said the
Colonel.
"Of course you don't, because it went
into the paper under the infamous title
Of 'Smearcase Tomorrow
A stupid blunder of the composition,
I suppose"
eyes, sir; and that is what I want to
see you for. The way that poem was
mutilated was simply scandalous. I
haven't slept night since. It exposed
me to derision. People think I am an
ass. Let me show YOU"
eco ahead" said the Colonel.
"The first line, when / wrote it, read
in this manner:
Lying by a weeping willow underneath gentle
slope.
That is beautiful, poetic, affecting. Now,
how did your vile sheet present it to the
public? There it is. Look at that
Made it read in this way:
Lying to weeping widow, to induce her to elope.
Weeping widow, mind you! A widow
This is too much-its enough to drive a
man crazy !"
"Tm sorry" said the Colonel !;
"but-''
"But look a-here at the fourth verse, 2"
said the poet that's worse yet. What
[ said was:
Cast thy pearls before the swine, and lose them in
the dirt.
[ wrote that out clearly and distinctly,
in plain, round hand. Now, what does
your compositor do? Does he catch the
sense of that beautiful sentiment? Does
it sink into his soul? No, sir He sets
it up in this fashion:
Cart thy pills before the SUNRISE and love them if
they hurt.
Now isn't that cold-blooded outrage on
a mans feelings? I'll leave it to you if
it isn't"
"It's hard, that's fact" said the
Colonel.
"And then take the fifth verse. In
the original manuscript it said, plain as
daylight
Take away the jlngling money it is only glitter
ing dross.
A man with only one eye, and cataract
over that, could have read the words cor
rectly. But your pirate up stairs there
do you know what he did? He made
it read
Take, away the jeering monkeys, on sorely CLAN
dered boss.
By George Ifelt like Draining him with
a shovel. I was never so cut up in my
life"
cit was natural, too" said the
Colonel.
"There, for instance, was the sixth
verse. [ wrote:
I am weary with tae tossing of the ocean as it
heaves.'
It is lovely line, too; but imagine my
horror and the anguish of my family
when / opened your paper and saw the
line transformed into:
am wearing out my trousers till they're open at
| the knees.
That is little too much That seems
to me like carrying the thing an inch Or
two too far I think [ have a coEIstitUl-
tional right to murder that compositof,
don't you?'
81 think you have"
"Let me read you one more verse. I
wrote:
swell the flying echoes as they roam along the
/ hills,
And feel my soul awaken to the ecstasy that
| thrills.
Now what do you suppose your miser-
able Outcast turned that into? Why, in
to- this +:
smell the frying shoes as they roast along the
/ bulls,
And peel nay sole mistaken in the erctary that
/ whir1s-
Gibberish, sir, awful gibberish I
must Stay that man. Where is hep
Hes out just now" said the Colonel.
/ "Come in tomorrow.
/ Il WILL said the poet "and I will
come armed"
/ Then he put on his hat, shouldered
his umbrella, and drifted off down stairs.
Wen Wife by His Tongue.
A fr1sky old bachelor who lives above
! Willow Ranch commenced a correspond
ence with girl living in the east
short TIME ago, and finally proposed to
/ bo7. 41o4 If che xzro,1IT a<o,,oo 80 IL No7s