Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1880-06-03
HE COULDN'T CURE HIMSELF.

Yesterday two colored men passed each
other on the street, when just after passing
one remarked:
"Fernal raskel as eber libed!''
"Who's raskel ?" demanded the other
man, turning around splitting on his hands,
and grasping his stick. "Does yer call me
a raskel p
"Did say dat yer was raskel?" said the
insulter, somewhat startled at the mans bel
ligerent demonstrations. 81 didn't fer to
yerself"
Eyes, yer did, sab !; and I'll maui you right
heah."
81 tell yer dat Use as innercent as chile
an eff yer hits me wild dat stick, ole man.
yer'll hab to answer mighty loud fer de trans
&C in de udder worl !"
"'Splain why yer said eternal raskel" jes'
as yer passed me, sab, or I'll make yer hide
look asher dan it do 'Splain right now
'Splain, I tell yer"
"Ole gen n'leman," said the insulter, begin
ming slowly, and evidently not knowing what
he was going to say, "some people is dicted
ter mighty cuis habets. Use one of desc kline
was mighty posed on when was slabe
an when I walks along in stracted sort oh
way, de faces oh desc men comes up before
me, l alers has lot OBJ epithets on han,
Dos yer know what epithet is ?"
"Yas, an eff yer doan hurry up an give
me explanation, I'll knock all de epithet
often de top OBJ yer head!'
"Ise 'splainin. De white folks treat me
mighty bad, an now ebber time sees one
OBJ dem in my mind, I plies to him one oh
my epithets. I alters keeps on han lot Of
rascals, liars, thieves, towards, sneaks, goats
hogs an dogs. Jis now I happened to see in
my mine de face OBJ man who uster whale
me, an sarchin' roun' in my mind I found de
epithet what was suitable an piled it. You
happened ter heah me an thought dat was
furrin' ter you"
dat is putty good way to 'splan yerself
but didn't yer fer ter me case cheated yer
outen plow last fall?'
"No, sab. Fore God didn't"
"Was it because I driv my mules inter yer
fep?"
mo, sah"
"'Twa'n't becase I wouldn't pay yer fur
splittin' dem rails" and he clutched his stick
tighter.
"'Fore Abraham an de Sabior OBJ de Ian
no."
"Well den, yer kin 60, but I wants yer ter
un'erstan' dat yer can't cuse dis ole man wild
de weakness OBJ de general Aesh.''
The insulter, after watching the honest
man until he had turned a corner, remarked
to himself:
II reckon I'll had to try some udder plan.
He skeer me mighty bad, but one what can
stan up an vin'icate hisself, sartinly is an
homes man. Dar's jes' one OBJ two tings.
He's elder an homes man or Use coward,
and after looking again to satisfy himself
that the old man was not coming back again,
continued, sI reckon it must be dat Use a
coward."-Little Rock (Ark.) Gazette.
a6r The Syracuse Journal relates that a
good mother was trying to explain to young
hopeful the other day about fighting against
the devil. After telling the little fellow who
the devil was, and how hard he was to sue
cessfully resist, he turned around and said :
Mamma, I'd be scared of the old devil, but
if was to come across one of the little dev-
lis, I'd knock the stu6ing out of him.
s9- A lawyer in Virginia, not remarkable
for his cleanliness of person, appeared at a
party while ago with rose in his button
hole "Where do you suppose it came from p
said he to brother lawyer who was admiring
it. The latter looked up and down the en-
tire length of the questioner, and with great
deliberaton responded: why, I suppose it
grew there!"
a6- Two young men were passing farm
house where farmer was trying to harness
a mule. "Won't he draw7" said one of the
horsemen. Of course he will" said the far
mer. "He draws the attention of every fool
that passes"
Bgr "Why don't you come in out of the
rain ?" said good.natured dominic to a rag
ged Irishman. "Shure it's av no consequence,
yer rivrence," returned Pat; "me clothes is
80 full of holes they wont howld wather."