Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-09-01
Thunder and Lightoin'.

An Ohio farmer had recently been
riding in the first coach back of the
sleeper, all the way from Cleveland to
Buffalo. He had home spun blue pants
and a coat which he had evidently pur-
chased ready made. On his head was
broad-brim black hat, and around his
neck there was the unmistakable paper
collar ,permeated with perspiratiOn. At
Buffalo a young lady in brown trave-
ling dress, with an apparent abundance
of new-fangled. spread-esgle crinoline
beneath it, got aboard the same car and
commenced casting about seat. With
that characteristic selfishness which
marks the American traveller Of to-day,
nealy every man in the car who had
not lady or a mother man In the seat
with him, had placed his little satchel
on one side of the seat and himself on
the other, to carry the idea that the
whole seat was "taken." The damsel
wriggled through the car and them
startled disconsolately 10 walk back.
She hadn't reached the middle Of the
ear when our Ohio friend hitched his
shoulders with marked individuality,
twisted bis shaggy head around on
large, thick, sun-burncd neck, to see if
anybody else was in the same predica-
ment, lifted his carpetbag from the out
side of the seat to the floor, coughed
nervouslY, and said to her.
81 reckon l kin make room fur you
ef you want a seat"
She did want one, and she wasn't too
bashful TO say so. They had travelled
side by side till they passed Croft's
station, when freight train suddenly
came alongside and ratified by them in
the opposite direction. The first crash
ing sound of the freight reminded the
Ohioan of death and disaster, no doubt,
for he turned his head with a jerk
toward the window. Then observing
that there was more scare than danger,
he sat somewhat embarrassed. But the
sudden movement had been too much
for the paper collar. 1t was all broken
up. His fair companion had spotted
him as q good-souled old gentleman,
and she laid aside her retiring DISPOSE
ton when she observed his embsrrass-
ment in the dilointing of the collar.
She rose very politly and said
Can't l pin it for You sir?"
"H'ml l reckon you kin, eff you're
ind to-" said he looking her squarely
in the face and becoming reassured 10
such an extent that he soon acted per-
fectly at home. Progress was then the
watch word between the two, and be-
fore the two had reached Batavia one
would have mistaken them for an old
widower and his gushing young bride,
SO thoroughly did they improve the
time chatting-he about "the gals at
home," and she about everything.
The conductor had been through and
taken I'D the tickets this side of Batavia,
and the damsel's small talk. like a toy
watch which Is wound every hour, had
about run down. Finally she took out
her embroidered handkerchief and
yawned behind it, Then she began to
wink very slowly, as if by effort, and
finally began to nod. Feeling quite as
much acquainted as if il had been his
own niece that sat beside him, the old
gentleman put forth his hand to
nudge" the sleepy girl and remind
her that it was "only q few miles fur
ther." Fatal movement for him! He
touched her in about the locality OF a
pocket in her cloak. Springing to her
feet like young tigress aroused, she
exclaimed in tones approaching a
scream, which few of the sleepy pas
sengers failed to hear
Don't you dare to touch my port
monnaie again! might have known
you were one of those sharp young
railroad swindlers disguised. They
always put on q paper collar, poor
clothes and wig, to deceive people and
steal their purses!'
All OF this was said about as rapidly
as the words could be put together.
But the astonished reply came as
quickly as it could follow
Thunder and llghtnIn'! Who are
you a-talkir' to, miss? But you can't
black-ma1 me-you can't; I'll expose
you, Darn me, eff I wasn't all took
in, Now you get your seat whar you
kim" And he planted the carpet-bag
hacL- hasida him on the seat