The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1880-08-11
ODDS AND ENDS.

able conduct.
Despairing old maids look languiah
ing even on rain.bows.
A recent discovery is telephone talk
ed to death by q barber.
The battles of the union-Fightng
between husband and wife.
During the last half year Italy I'M
ported 900 tons of cereals.
In Philadelphia q boy who ties q tin
pail to q dogs tail is fined $40.
Olive oil is adulterated with the oil
of cotton seed in Southern Europe.
A tramp called his shoes ",corporas
tions," because they had no soles.
The way to make large hole in your
pocket is to incur large rent.
Ducks are fond of flies. There is just
where they differ from bald-headed old
men. -. ... ~.
There is a great deal Of luck in Q
horseshoe when thrown, If it doesn'H
hit you. $50 I,
An English scientist attributes our
cold waves to Venus and our hot waves
to Jupiter.
George Morris, of Old Freedom, Mo.
was killed bv lightning while at work in
wheat field. ~.
In Florence the royal lottery and
the supreme court occupy rooms
on the same floor. ~ z
That there should be one man die
Ignorant, who had capacity for knowl-
edge; this l call tragedy.
Authors are spoken o. as dwelling IN
attics, because so few of them are able
to live on their first story. ~ :.
The man who fell out Of his bunk on
the steamboat explained that his black
ened eye was berth mark.
A boy will dig over square rod OF
garden ground for fish bait, and yet ne
could not be hired to work on six loot
onion bed. -.
Fire, food, mistake or accident may
rob us of our material possessions, but
they cannot get at the treasure OF the
immortal mind.
A little girl in church, after the con-
tibution plate had been passed. COM
placently and audibly said: 1 paid
| for four, ma-was that right3" =
A bad little Philadelphia boy made
his mothers hair rise the other day.
| He stole her switch for kite bobs.-,
Philadelphia Chronicle Herald.
The annual potatoe crop of the United
States is estimated at nearly 20O, ,OO0,0 ,0OO
bushels. ofwhich New York State alone
furnishes 25, ,0O0,0 bushels. /. =
Raphael is to have splendid monu-
ment erected to his memory by the peo-,
ple IF Urbino, his native place, on the
fourth centenary OF his birth, Aprllo'
1883. ~. 49,
The reason more umbrellas than
watermelons are stolen is thought to be
because the thief doesn't have to plug
the umbrella. 1t is always ripe for the
harvest.
The man who grasped an opportunity
tried the same scheme with humble
bee. He abandoned his last enterprise
ouicker'n he did the first one.-Keosus
Geat City. ;
eff I have ever used any unkind
words. Hannah" said Mr.. Smiley, re.
6ectively, "I will take them all back"
"Yes, I suppose you want to use tnem
over again." was the not very sootning
reply. 49,.
1t is estimated that there are 5oO
florists establishments within radius
of ten miles OF the New York city hal!,
and that the capital invested in Land,
structures and stock is not Less tnan
O,0O0, 900.
The manufacture of sporting imple'
ments has assumed large proportions m
this country. It is estimated that irom on
90, 600 to 6O,OOO sets of croquet, @0,CyO
baseball bats, and $4,000 baseDais
will. be made for this seasons trade pS
a single firm in Chicago. p
A short time ago two boys in San
Diego, CAL, built for themselves o smaI!
boat, and after, taking on 6oaro
three months provisions, sailed down
the coast to Todos Santos lslanos, " ne.e
they have established q camp ana are
now actively engaged in seal hunnhE,
shell gathering, ETC., with a prontao'e
return for their hardy undertaking. ..
The Sioux held their annual sun dance
in Dakota recently and the usual scenes
of cruelty were enacted. One young
warrior held out for tifty-six hours ana
then tainted. He was hanging al tDat
time by a stick run through the fesh 9l
the back. He tainted before the nesn
gave way. He was so grIeved Oyer LIS
failure that he tried to kill himself. 70
A remarkable resonance has been oo.
served in connection with the great
staircase OF stone in the Walnais az
Regensburg, Germany: From one Oh sne ;ae
landings, where two other sta!rcases lise
in opposite dir, ctions, a metal!lc rlng'
ing is produced by every 1ooesSitlp, ln
willie stamp of the foot is answered oy
q tone so Gear, rcsounding and musical,
that the visitor can hardly belle7e tnn'
the stairs are rot made wholly OF oeH,
metal. AS the visitor passes up .ne
stairs the ringing gradually oecoin'o
weaker, and soon ceases.
TO THE FLY
Oh thou insinuous thing, whom nave sesn
Disnorting in the butter-dish and soup-lureen
| Or gailv gamboling on the bald heso .,.
From whence the once thick halr - ha'"
| cred,
To thee sing song-yet not in prase'
Thou bird that lengthenest my days.
For oft would in morning take repose
But for thy pcregrina,ions on my nosei
! Al noh, when YOU should be hushed anu
| still, ,,.,,
Thy ving.wrousht buzzing my repose do'n
kill
Thu, at both ends my days are longer spun,
while yor. Won 'tarnal varmint, think IL inn
''''> -.Marathon Indspsnd {"