davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
HUMOROUS.

"CLAMAyI PRoFUNDo. THE pro-
prietor of an oyster house, in Proyi-
dence X. /. was astounded during the
last rain by the entrance into his estah-
shment of. plucky resolute little fel
low, who was Juggling and tugging AT
a three-bushel basket, filled heaplng
full of long clans. He sat the basket
at the feet of the proprietor with a
slam, shook his fists furiously and
shou ted: |This must never happen
again; never STRIP ''What?" demand
ed the bewIldered proprietor. "Why,
these claims have stood out for more
than a half hour in the drenching rain.
| held an umbrella over their heads
until could stand it no longer. Look
at them. heads out, and ladies among
them at that, wearing low-neck dress
es! Have you the first.instincts of a
gentleman about you? Put your ear
down to the basket and listen to the
wild wall of matchless sorrow that
proceeds therefrom, their inconsolable
clamor for relief, If may be pardoned
the apparent jocoseness Of the express
sion.''
''But it don't hurt clans to be out in
the wet,' argued the dealer.
.'Ldeclare it does" said the fiery
man. 81 know the nature of clam,
sir. am conscious that there, are
chords IN their makeup that vibrate
exquisitely to violent emotions. know
the secret sorrow Of CLAIMS existence.
What saith the poet: 'CLdmGri profandO.
That means clans calling for help from
the mighty deep. CLANS weep, weep,
weep. Their affairs get at low ebb,
and then, clam-bank after clam-bank
goes up, and there is nothing left for
the clans to do, but to fritter away
their existence. All !wcep, poor things.
1 mingle my tears with yours. Both of
us have grit, but fate is too hard upon
us. l shall Low resume my station
across the street and watch, that your
needless infliction of cruelty upon in
nocent clans be not repeated"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

BROTHERS and Sisters on the ice
Grown-up Sister-'Oh, Charley, if yOu
must go away, can't you introduce Inc
to one of your school-fellows, to look
after me till you come back?" Charley
-"Oh, no! 1t wouldn't do, 1t would
be so rough on fellow to fag him out
like that!''
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

Narrowing WHEAT Narrowing
wheat in the spring will increase the
yield at least five bushels to an acre;
it wont hurt the timothy, and the
clover seed can be sOwn after the har-
rowing is done. Ii is an easy matter
for auy farmer to prove the truth or
falsity of such a statement. Try it
on one acre in the spring if yon do not
want to ris the whole field, and watch
the result. 1t is only by experiment
ing that the farmer advances.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

ALABAsTER ORNAMENTs.-There Il
nothing prettier than graceful little
vases and caskets of alabaster, and few
household ornaments more trying to
ones temper, because of the difficulty
in keeping them clean. They may be
thoroughly and easily renovated by
cleaning them with a weak solution OF
aquafortis prepared in the proportion
ef two ounces to a pint of filtered rain
water. Apply with point brush, wash
thoroughly and dry in the sun.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

REQUISITES FOR GooD BUTTER. First /:
Good cows, Second Good feed. Good
sweet hay and corn meal will do it if
you cannot provide any better. Third {:
The utmost care and neatness in every
manipulation from the milking 20 the
marketing; skill to put up an attractive
package. If the producer is not able
to attend to these matters. the business
Of butter making may as well be given
up, for it Will not pay.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

HauseH OF Stockholm, has patented a
process by which biscuit war; can be
coated with so thick and adherent a
layer of metal-copper, gold or silver
that the articles have every appearance
OF massive metallic ones, and can, like
them, be engraved and chased. Prof.
Schmidt suggests that the process is
nearly related to the gslvano-plastic.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

"YOU are my treasure, after ALL
said an old reprobate striving to pla-
cate his wife after abusing her for an
hour or two. "Oh, yes" she sarcastic
ally answered, ''that's the reason, /
suppose, you wis Ii me dead so eften
you are seeking to lay your treasure
cup in heaven"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

4 foreign apparatus, shaped like a
gun and about as long, has recently
been devised for mailing down flooring
boards. The contrivance can DO, is is
said, the work of six men, and the in
yentor expects ultimately to render it
self-feeding. 1t is kept in position by
the foot and knee, and the nail is placed,
point down, in an aperture at the top
of the device. IL slides down to the
bottom, and then the operator draws up
rod, and. by one downward stroke of
this, the nail is cleanly driven into the
boards beneath.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

OLD Y. lectures his nephew, a con-
frmed gambler. 'Then you never
played. did you, uncle?" eyes, once,
in 1877, at Baden. \ gentleman whom
| didn't know proposed game of ecarte
at ten francs. L was weak enough 10
agree; he lost ten games" "Then you
must have won u hundred francs 20
Yes, won them, that is so; but |
might have lost them, and have never
touched a card since; it was lesson. "
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

Whm starch is added TO milk by
fraudulent dealers the fact can be de-
termined by the process recommended
by DR.. Vulpius 4 sample is cogulated
with few drops of acetic acid, heated
10 boiling, and filtered. A watery So
luton of iodine is poured into the clear
whey. which instantly developes a
blue cloud of starch present.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

"Hi, cabbv, have you hot brick In
your hsck?" Eyes, boss" (Enter
fare.) 81 say, ca bby, this is as cold as
Greenland-I thought you said you had
some hot bricks" $50 have-they're
under my feet out here. G'lang?"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

TO PURIFY WATER.-Pulverized alum
possesses the property of purifying
water. A large spoonful stirred into
1. hogshead of water will so purify it,
that in few hours the dirt will sink
to the bottom, and it will be fresh and
clear as spring water. Four gallons
may be purified by a teaspoonful.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

pay 3 to cents a pound extra for but
ter made with Gilt-Edge Butter Maker.
Ii increases the production to 10 per
cent. Reduces labor or churning one
half. Gives rich golden color the
year round. Sold by druggists, gro
GERS and general storekeepers. Send
stamp fer "Hints to Butter-Makers." !"
Address, Butter Improvement Co.,
Buffalo, n. Y.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

AN ARTICLE or MERIr.-''B BrorR :
BTonehicdl Trocies" are the most popu-
lar article in this country or Europe
for Throat Diseases and Coughs, and
this popularity is based upon real
merit. limitations are offered for sale,
many of which are injurious. The
genuine "BrO,en's Bronchial Troches'
are sold only in boxes.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
s;onsumpuon CURED.

AN old physician, retired from prso-
tice, having had placed in his hands 1y
an East India missionary the formula
of a simple vegetable remedy for the
speedy and permanent cure Tor Con
sumption, Bronchitis, Catarrn, As.hna
and ali Throat and Lung Affections,
also a positive and radical cure for Ner-
yous Debility and all Nervous Com
plants, after having tested its wonder
full curative powers in thousands OF
cases, has felt it his duty to make IL
know to his suffering fellows Aetu-
ated by this motive and desire TO re-
Iieve human suffering. 1 will send free
of charge TO all who desire 1t, TINS re-
cipe, in German, French, or English,
with full directions tor preparing and
using. Sent by mail by addressing
with stamp, naming this paper, W. W..
SHERAR, I4S Po1ers' Block, Rochester,
Neu York.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

AFTER War, Pestilence and Intemperance,
Colds lead TO the greatest destruction OF hu-
man life, mainly in consequence OF their being
systematically neglected-.left TO 20 IS they
come"-until simple, durable affection Il con-
verted into serious and generally fatal dis
ease. IL is better TO take care Of q Cough or
Cold from its incipiency, BY using promptly DR..
JayneS ExpectOrant. remedy thoroughly
adapted TO remove these complaints. and
equally effective In the primary stages OF Con-
sumption, Asthma and Bronchitis.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

SURFACE DRAINs.-If If not already
made, ample drains should be provid ed
to free the fields from surface water.
Drains that have been plowed out, may
need clearing IN places with spade or
hoe, that the water may pass of read
lily. In laying out open drains, the
the slopes should be so made, that the
water will not flow of too rapidly,
with a gentle inclination only in this
case much of the water will soak into
the soil and will not wash away
either the soil, or any manure that is
on the slopes.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

The man with a headache has faint
recollection that she asked him to call
again-next New Years Day. He
should have commenced sending his
card in as soon as he became unfit TO
compliment the ladies with his actual
presence.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

The harvesting of the carrot crops
can be facilitated by running plow
on one side of the rows, when the
roots are easily removed by hand.
The tops are then cut off, and surface
moisture from the roots dried by ex-
posure to the sun a day or two, when
they may be stored in cellar, out OF
doors, or in pits like turnips and po-
tatoes. Carrots having a greater ten
dency TO decay than many roots,
should never be stored in great bulk,
hut placed in small heaps only, and
kept at as low a temperature as possi-
bic above the freezing point. On the
approach of warm weather they incline
to sprout. if left in bulk ; hence, when
it is desired to preserve them longer,
the crown ought TO be cut off and the
roots spread in a cool dry place.
Horses thrive on carrots given ju-
dIciously with other feed; they are
also excellent for working cattle.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

DRIVERS Mistake.-Draymen seem
TO forget, or else they do not know,
that the draft of n wagon is doubled
when the wheels turn on snow, and
very much greater still when the snow
is deep and mealy. Weconld never see
the advantage of overlooking team
and spending SO much time in getting
them started when they got "stuck, !"
as they are sure TO do if the load is too
heavy. Better take smaller lead and
20 quickly without injuring the horses.
In the cities, as well as in the country
there are more or less treacherous holes
which it is well to think about when an
unreasonable weight is put upon a We
hicle. And it is we'll to remember that
one team "stuck on a ihorOughfa" c
will often hinder icore besides them
selves.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

An old farmer out i'm Indiana says
that for his part he don't know where
the present rage tor trimming bonnets
with birds is going to end. Only four
or five years ago he bought his daugh-
ter humming bird: next year she
wanted a robin, the next pheasant,
and this season he declares he had to
chain up his Thanksgiving turkey or
she'd have had that perched on top of
her head.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

A LITTLE boy said he didn't want the
soft part of the biscuit. "SOme little
boys" observed his mother "would be
very thankful to get it," ''Then why
don't you give it 10 them." answered
the four-year-old hopeful.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

SUNDAY-sCHcoL teacher: "You mus
recollect that all am telling you hap
pened one thousand eight hundred and
seventy nine years ago." Pupil :
''Lor,' miss, how the time do slip
away ~
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

RAILWAY CAKE.-To cupfuls of
-four, one of sweet milk, two eggs
beaten, one teaspoonful of soda, one of
cream of tartar. Mix ali into a batter
and pat into buttered tin. Bake for
twenty minutes.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

COFFEE CAKE.-One cup strong coffee,
one cap molasses one cup of sugar, one
cup chopped raisins, four cups flour.
one cup butter, one teaspoonful soda.
Stir up the soda In the molasses.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

NEVER defer until tomorrow what
should be attended to to-day. A slight
cough ought never TO be neglected
when % cent bottle of DR. Bulls
Cough Syrup viii prevent it from be-
coming chronic.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

AN old lady wearing pair Of green
goggles stepped on the Sacramento
traiE at South Vallejo and Knocked at
the car door, and actually waited till II
was opened on the inside by passeng-
er. For consummate politeness this
has no parallel.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

FAMILY VINEGAR.-A cheap vinegar
consists of twenty-five gallons of warm
rain water with four gallons of treacle
and one gallon of yeast. Let this fer
ment freely and it is then fit for use.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
AGRICULTURE.

EGG-EATING by PCLLETs.-As a gen.
eral thing, this habit Is introduced by
The accidental breaking of an egg. IL
may be induced by throwing egg-shells
from the kitchen into the poultry yard
they should be broken into small pieces
before giving them to fowls. Some
times eggs crack by freezing in cold
weather, and thus expose a portion OF
their contents. Eggs are very delicious
morsels to hens. If one fowl acquires
this habit, all the others in the same
flock will soon learn it too, if confined
where they see what is going on; and
they always make rush at whatever
one of their fellow Is eating. The habit
is one v,ry hard to kreak; killing the
whole flock seems to be a desperate
resort but if the brood is not especially
valuable, and the flock small one, is
is really the best possible method saving
time and money in the end. The fol-
lowing method may be tried first, how,
ever: Let the fowls have free range in
summer, or draw them OFF to a locality
at some Ii tie distance from the nests
in winter, and let the nesls be so COW
cred as to be quite dark, and prevent
the laying hens from seeing the eggs.
Hens will not stay in dark nook to
scratch and peek, although they prefer
rather dark place to lay in. Scatter
wheat screenings md pounded chand-
ler's scraps, or other attractive food
among straw. or some such light stuff,
TO induce them to spend their time
scratching for it. Their visits TO the
nests will then be only on the legiti-
mate business of laying. If fowls have
an unrestricted range, the insects and
other attractions of the fields will
answer the purpose OF an artificial
scratching-pla in summer; but in
rough, wet weather, or in winter, the
fowls must be employed indoors TO
prevent forming bad habits, or TO cure
them if already formed. All the grain
remaining at the scratching-plac at
night very likely will be devoured by
rats and mice. However, by eX-
ercising n moderate degree of calcu-
lation, one will coutrive 10 throw down
just enough in the morning 20 last till
the middle of the afternoon. and the
remainder of the days allowance can
be given before dark.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

NEGETINE.-rhe great success OF the
VEGETLSE rs cleanser and purifier of
the blood Is shown beyond doubt by
the great numbers who have taken it,
and received immediate relief, with
such remarkable cures.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

MEDICAL MAN-Aud then, with re-
gard 10 the swelling at the back OF
your head, don't apprehend anythin 2
serious, but you must keep your eye
on it,"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

To Crystclizs GrasSes.-One pound
best alum powdered; half a gallon Of
soft water; boil until dissolved; dip
the grass into tile solution and allow IL
to remain six or seven hours; remove
and dry in the sun.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

GOOD THIyGs.-'Now, boys, cannot
have you playing cricket on Sunday:'
Boys-'Oh grandmamma, we are not
playing cricket, but { My showing cOus-
in Charles how We bowl ON weekdays.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

Pound CAKE.-Fourteen eggs, one
and half pounds each of sugar and
-four, one-fourth pound Of butter and
one teaspoon baking powder; bake one
and one-half hours.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

t'I HAVE a theory about the dead Ian
guages," "said new student. ''What
is It?" said the professor. ''That they
are killed by being studied too hard"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

The price OF soap Is rapidly advanc-
ing. A years supply OF DoBBNs'
ELECTRIC bought now at old price
will be avery judicious purchase.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

EGG BREAD.-One quart of butter
milk, three eggs, three tablespoons
flour, lump of butter size of an egg,
half teaspoon soda, corn meal enough to
make thick batter.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

GUARD-"Now miss, jump in, train
going on" Child-"B I can't go be-
fore have kissed mamma" Guard
Jump i'll, miss, I'll see to that"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

"WHY, Willie, you can't possibly
eatanother plate of pudding" Yes
can; one more plate will just fill this
BjllD
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

THERE was young man so we'll bred,
That the hair would not stay on his head,
But the CaTboline oil
Put new hair ON the soil,
And now with an heiress he's wed.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

Iron railway sleepers are said to have
proved, both in India and England,
much cheaper than wooden ones. Their
gradual adoption is predicted.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

The aerial quickstep is what they
call hanging in Kansas.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
Grscers and StoreIseepers

4 dose of eamphor, Ii is said, will
cure the sickness caused by tobacco.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
100000 Persons Cured

VINO can tell the value OF smile ?
The bartender.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04

SToP coughing at once by the imme-
diate use of DR.. Bulls Cough Syrup
% cents bottle
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
FIVE DOCTORS DID NOT CURE.


Mr.. II. Il. STEVENS:
Dear sir.-I hereby certify that have been
sick for three years, unable 10 get any relief
whatever. I have been under tie care OF nve
OF the best physicians, each one giving my III
mss different name. The nrst ssld General
debility; the second. Female Debility and I'm
pOveri.hed plOcd: the third, Liver Complaint
and Dyspepsia; the fourth said WAS Ia Con-
sumption; the NTH said Neuralgia on the Lungs
and WAS certain wuu d never ENJOY COED health,
so | concluded TO give up doctors and CON-
mence1 taking. @<tent Medicines At this time
was very weak. 1 had pain In my side, back
and chest, slept very little. and the food ate
caused me pain. / was burden 10 myself and
ir ENDS. was persuaded TO Try Vegetlne.
iIiend gave me bottle 10 try, not thinking 4
would DO me any good. as had no hope OF ever
getting any better. After using the first bottle
my head was better and could sleep better.
The next two, my appetite came and was able
TO enjoy my 10 "a. ! have now taken i've bot
ties L have a good appetite md sleep well,
have 10 pam. and am able o do most OF my own
work. lprOnOuncs your meficin ne far ahe 4d OF
any other. and can cheerfully recommend II 10
any one In need OF such a medicine.
Yours respectfully, MRS. E. ALLEN.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1880-02-04
Parlor Organ Instruction Booh
Oliver Ditson & Co., Boston.
[lIPHTnERIA!!!!

Johnson's Anodyns Iiniment VIII posi-
lively prevent this terrible disease and viii
positlveiy cure nine cases n ten. Information
that Will save mary lives sent free by neil
D7nt delay = moment PTeveIti IS better
than cJ-e- s-li cvPrTvh-re.
i. b. JOHNSON & CO, Bangor. Ne
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1880-02-27

Pacific Express. east, on sunday, when flag
ged, Will stop ut MiddictOwn, EliZabcthtown
Mt. Joy, LanGlisville, BirIi-in Hand, Lcmitn
Place, Gap, Christiana, Parkesburg, Coates
willie, Oakland and Glen Loeb.
Fast Line, west, on Sunday, when tagged.
Will stop ut tDOwningtOwn, COatcsvillc, Farkcs-
burg, Mt. Joy, EliZabethtOwn and Mi,idctown
Hanover Accommodations, west, connects ri
Lancaster with Niagara Express, west ut 1890,
a. NJ, and will run through to Hanover.
Frederick Accommodation, west. connects at
Lancaster, with Fast Line, west. ut 2:lO l.. NJ,
and will run through to Frederick.
DEADING AND COLUMBIA RAILROAD.
IL On and after MONDAY. OCT. 6ru. i>19,
lows: