The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1880-01-17
VARIETIES.

he wants on his own personal security.
---Neao Orleans PtcGyatne.
"A Pennsylvania man has hog fifty
years old. The Oil City Derrick thinks
Sc this must be ancient grease"
The Sisters of Charity in the United
States numbered recently 1,179, in
charge of LOG esta blishments.
The Swedish army has corps of
skaters. 1t must be a beautiful sight
TO see an entire company strike an air
hole.
"A man hates to own up that he
isn't as smart as hen, but he's got to
allow that hen can sit on an egg and
not get mad.
old bachelors are credited with
having miss-shun in the world, but it
is very rarely you find an old maid who
has man-shun.
-Anacreon was killed by q grape
seed. There may be many men nova
days who have gotten away with the
seed, but the juice has tloored them.
-"Can man marry his widows
sister," He can-provided he is a
&c California widower," and his wife
sister is willing. NorriStoa0pa Herald.
=" Money" says Mr.. Talmage, SIS
a golden breasted bird with silver
beak." Yes; and it's a kind of poultry
that most men are particularly fond of.
Chicago Times.
The Washington Capital says:
~'Some of our slow subscribers who
may not find our paper in their mail
can understand that its absence is due
to their unremitting kindness"
"A long housewife article has been
written on How to Make Rag Rug"
1t is long process. The quickest way
TO make rag rug, is to knock ga"
letter out of the rag and put "u'' in the
middle.
Never eat raw eggs, as the little
distoma ovatums therein contained
must be cooked.-M z. Express. Or,
III other words, the chicken feathers
may stick across your throat. Ed
change.
"A New York girl having received
a dozen of the most exquisite handker-
chiefs as present, the Boston Post is
mean enough to believe that she is anx-
ious enough to acquire cold that will
last all winter.
-Arabella Con her toes in a chair,
clutching convulsively at her skirts)
90 Bridget! A mouse, a mouse. Come
and catch it, quick!" Bridget: "Sure,
mum, there's no hurry. If this one
gets away, 1 can catch plenty more for
yer, mum"
-One-third of the gold that is mined
goes to wear and tear, one-third goes
into circulation, and one-third into the
arts and manufactures. All the gold,
in the world would make only pile
twenty-five feet wide, forty-five feet
Aong and twenty-five feet high.
Another evidence of the advance
ngnt of our country is proudly alluded
to by the Detroit Free Press, which says
<'now American jumping-jacks and
wooden horses are sold in every coun-
try where the children don't have to
play with their big toes to have fun"
Paper as a substitute for wood in
The manufacture of lead pencils is being
attempted in Germany. The paper is
stepped in an adhesive liquid and rolled
around the core of the lead to the re-
>quired thickness, and is colored after
drying, when it resembles an ordinary
cedar pencil.
A distinguished and long-winded
Paris lawyer lately defended criminal
'unsuccessfully, and at the end of the
trial the Judge received the following
mote: "The prisoner humbly prays
that the time occupied by the plea of
the counsel for the defense be counted
in his sentence"
"A poet says: "Love holds me so!
would that could go! 1 flutter up
and down, and to and fro. In vain
Love holds me So" Eat raw onion
Just before you go to see her and she
will loosen her grasp and throw up a
window. Paste this in your hat
sPec6'S NiIe0aubee San.
"A rich snob, who married a lady of
brilliant genius, said at dinner party:
" When we were married my wife de-
clared, with all my worldly gifts l
thee endow,' when she hadn't penny
In the world" "But then there were
her splendid talentsr' said lady.
sop exclaimed a wit, "but she
didn't endow him with themr'
"A tenant has been dancing all
night over the head of his landlord. At
six in the morning the latter comes up
stairs and complains bitterly of the an
aoyance. "What annoyancep" asks
she tenant. "Why, l haven't slept a
wink all night" "Neither have l."
says the tenant, "and yet don't make
any fuss about it,
Mark Twain's sketch about Azure.
2iia's lover, who went gradually to
pieces by meeting various accidents, is
here rivaled: A man in Madison Coun-
lty, KY, went through the terrible or
deal of having bombshell burst in his
hands just after the war. He was
dreadfully mangled by the explosion,
but recovered from his wounds. Some
time after that he was shot through the
Foody with a navy revolver. Recently
he was driving wagon with heavy
saw-log on it. The wagon upset and
) Che saw-log passed over his body, crush
ing him in frightful manner. Again
HE is recovering.
He came up little late, stepped in
without ringing, and striding softly in
d,A,N,Nad int