The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1880-11-10
Bless you aD, my children
s2afS @4<%ysseTN

Bless you all, my children.
--~gna ~ <GN-S ~ SS-----
FLOATING FANOIEs.
When the enterprising hceler isn't heeli9o.
Isn't hteliug,
The enterprising heller is in bed.
With a rather wild and alcoholic reehng.
'Holic reeing,
Located on the INSIDE CT his head,
Of his head.
But he always rises early in the morning.
In the morning,
And hunts the candidate with vim and glee.
And he goes for him without a minutes warning.
Minutes warning,
And pounces on him nimbly for v,
He tells him that his cause he idolizes,
Idolizes,
He says he'll vote for him full oft and free.
Oft and tree,
Then he strikes him for some silverware for prizes.
Ware for prizes,
10 be shot for by the target compa-nee,
Conpa-nee.
And the candidate his feelings has to smother,
Has to smother,
He'll be beaten if the heller he doth shun,
He doth shun,
Taking one consideration with another,
With another,
The heeler's lot is quite a happy one,
Happy one. Chic.
II am satisfied with my lott said a real
estate owner who held a piece of city ground
worth $4,000 a foot.
LET US bury the beer and use our teeth as
'ombstones, is the way TO ask a friend to
take something 10 take.
The average age OF a hog is only fifteen
years. This always consoles US when we see
a man spreading himself out over four seats
in q railway car.
sHow can I get rid Of some of these
said a penulious old woman, anxious
to marry off her daughters. .sMa-5ry-m mon
ey" replied her son.
Ayoung lady at an examination in gram
mar was asked "wby the noun bachelor was
Z" She replied-s'Because it is very
they don't get married.
"In what condition was the patriarch Job
at the end of his life ?" asked a BROOKLYN
teacher of a quiet-lookiDg boy
at the head Of the class. dead, = was the
calm answer.
"Who won q asked Xenophon, as he saw
tearing off his clothes and throwing
them away. sThe skunk" growIed Gryllus.
Then, on this OCCASION suggested Keno.
phon, ssthe battle was to the strong"
DR.. K. is as bad a hunter as he is a physi-
but this does not prevent him regularly
the hunting season comes around from
a fortnight in the fields with his
log and gun. And that's the only period Of
he year when he don't kill anything" said
one Of bis colleagues, kindly.
my case is just here, said a citizen to a
the other day; 1.-THE plaintiff will
wear that | bit him, and then I will up and
wear that | did not. Now, what can you
make out of that If we go to trial?"
Five dollars apiece!" was the prompt reply,
IS the attorney extended his hand.
Of all the specimens Of mankind you see,
he city-bred greenhorn is the funniest. He
lnoWs the superficial, can tip his hat grace
ully and all that sort Of thing, but he hasn't
g much omfnon sense il a whole year as
ls country ruaezc cousin who says stRy gosh
nd Sol darn it ALL does in five minutes.
The city chap will grow greener the older he
'ecomes, while the country lad will move to
be city and clean him out of house and home
" q sharp bargain.
The other Sunday the Superintendent of q
ity Sunday school was questioning the pu-
lis on the subject Of the lesson. Among the
~uestions asked was: s'When God found out
lat Adam and Eve had sinned in the garden,
hat did be do?' A little fellow In the rear
f the room was just too anxious to reply bis
eye and excited frame attracted the
%ttention Of the questioner, and unfortunately
Q was greeted with a nod Indicating that he
light 5 With q. voice, the echoes OF
hich could be heard far off on she distant
he shouted, ssGaVe them the &. Q.
D most Of the. school this vas perfectly SAT
and Ineligible, but TO 9 i naa
be explained that II was street AFao TOT
grand bounce, : that ID, removal from inc
l1den.