Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1880-09-23
SICK ROOSTURS AND SO
FORTH.

sum Moral Reflections for Mr..
Cammul and His Sick Peultrie
Upon the ILL., Manners of Crow
ing Before They are Out of the
Woods, &c.
Mr.. 4. ". Cammul, Editor and so forth:
My VERY DEER SUR am very
much pleased with yure remarks in
vure relleable paper about the Name
election. l don't wunder the roostur
was sick at the stummick after swallerin
5000 voters, but then il he wants to
turn hisself intu a hog he ought to git
sick. That's write-give it too en-
make EN- sick agin, We can relic on yure
statements, and Blan's and all the rest
OF our ielers up there. Them inferel
Democrats never studded ennything
ennyhow. We kin beat EN- at rithme.
tick ali the time, theirs no use taken.
Now tina want too make out tina had
more niggurs in thare procession last
saturday mite than We had. Amt that
r~edickelus? The idee of havin more
OF ennything than We hev,
whether Its n~iggers, or i%njuns, or
heather Chimes, or government mummy
is preposterus. it cant be did, and shant
be neither, as long as we kin count fin
gers and tose. 1 want yu to tell the
people in yure next paper and also in
yure next valubel orashun, that its very
doubtful whether thare is emmy SIGH man
as Hancock, and if thare is, he wus a
iniurnel Rebbel and fit agin us endurin
the war. Garfield is the man we must
hav under the circumstances now sur.
rounden owre party. He fit with us
alter he got a cOmmisshun, and a sored
buCkkled onto him, and ii they hadn't
made him 90 to Congris nginst his vii
| expect he would be titin yit, onless
sumboddy pade him TO stop. No sir
mr.. CANNED, we want jist SIGH
patryouts as him and Mus5y, and
LJngstreet, and Rand, and Keys
aud menny more that | Good menshine
TO run things in this country, and fur
rim parts. Just between you and me |
don't think tina have treated you eQoal-
Is rite. Do you? | hey often thote
what a pity it wus IRE wasent born cuI-
Tered, cspesshelly yu. amt smart but
you are, and if yu wus cultured va o o
put u better fuSe onto the thing, and
then when yu git that s~uvenerlty Hat
onto you're gorgus he'd, like that Ieerien
tower We reed about sumwharc, n
yure hans in yure britches pockets. U,
shaw! | kant expires miseli. iu kan
tawk french like a nativ, and | hev got a
phase picked out fere WI and you shell
hav it. Now gessl!! Iu shell be sent
| as minnistur ~penitentuary to the Re
| bubble OF Hat, WHARF you ken hay all
| the advantages OF sociul society that | no
vure hart longs fur. Ii You was cullud
WI mite git along better at FUSED
bat then you kin glst stane
yureself a little more and yul do tina
wuddent no the difference. Did WI
| ever reed material History or koorse
WI hav. a man in yure egsaltid posts
shun hes red cverrything-Did yu ever
ride along, no walk along a country
rode in the summer time and see a kind
Of bug a rolein a kind of ball along the
rode and every wunst and a while tina
wood git up on top oil them balls and
look around TO see if emmy thing wus
goin tn take il WI from them. OF
coorse VII hey. Tha wus black bugs
and tina bad bin roOtin round kOllec.ln
treasures fur thareselyes and thare iani-
lies. Yu list take a lessen from them
bugs, but then no yu hev dun it
HI. md ,.I,an NhnIIV gAl ynn
hevent YOU say "Ye5 i did" then yu
hcv got yure ball-Hati is sed to bee a
good place TO kOllect them ball,
and | want yu to git m to
say nuthin oil the soshall part
of it. But then | want to put flea in
yure year; mebby you no it areddy.
Don't let no on them coniedderit briga-
ders. / tell you tina ar dangerus. Make
Il pictur in yure next paper about a big
rooster with his mouth full of crow,
standin' up biz like. Then the next
run under him make the crow layin' on
the ground ded, and the rooster SPUN
INTO him and let it run all owe that
side OF the paper, so that tina kant GIT
away frum it. Thatill make EVERY
boldly sick that sees il, and that is what
we want to do. Then put jorge Colwel
| on top OF that Teller. Hancock under
neeth that a poundin' him to death, but
don't put them two rooster runnin' a
race in agin, becaws Hancock rooster is
ahpd 50 fur that he is neerly out OF site
before our rooster kuns up behind with
his mouth open, and Il BLOWN with
fdtapg. line tellin yu rs a friend becaws
| heer what tina say, pull that hat Of
yOurn down over yure eyes and years,
80 tina wont no you and il w kant do it
y~ureseli git the MOrgantown post, and
| stnrsiss, and thompson, aud stevenson,
| aud pierpoint, and hutchinson, and ha-
CANS, and Jorge ColwelI and me to help
WI and will never let that teller Z. V.
Nasty git that offs at the X rodes agin.
we kant afford it. | want | myself and
am bound too hev it. Y A. 7. W.
whitch means-Yure's always to win.
u. ). don't hev yure hat so fur down
over yure years that yu kant see them.
Confpdderit brigadeers, wach EN- good.
p. s. 9. We hev some good pain offises
in the silty now ii the demmocrats hev
the majority, but We want EN- all fool
EN- agin. Gure's, all ways TO win.
p. :. 81 furgot TO say that You
shooddent make EN- too mad at iust but
list give Jake Jackson the devvel spOse
ne does hate our fellprs and ses so. Can't
we hate as good as emmy Of I'm and
haven't We bin doin it all the time, and
can't we keep on doin it? Hate, thun-
der, tina don't no what that thing is-we
can beet EN- at that all hOiler az well as
iiggerrin. Y. A. Y. w.
p. s. 4.-Dog on if don't keep on fur
gittin all the time. i thought i wus dun
when i amt, but lie hev too rite you a
nuther letter sum OF these daze, when i
| cit over this run, and over CRATE victry
in Name, viz: me and WI and Blame and
Garfield, don't furgit what j tolled WI
about the rooster rase aud haiti and Jake
Jackson, and put the ded crow in next
time. well beet EN- il We hev to set up
couutin all mite, fur a weak.
Y. A. 7. W.
Col. WILSON'S APPOINTMENTS.