Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1880-09-23
Sips Of Fun.

The individual who point.
t with pride is the woman with ;
! handsome diamond ring.
The mosquito has six legs anC
only one mouth. Let us there.
} fore be thankful that if it does
} bite it doesn't kick. 3ab
Young man, a diamond pin
looks real nice and glistens
brightly, but when 81 a week
supports man and pin both,
one or the other is not genuine.
When the trunks ola leading
Vicksburg belle were deposited
at the wharf of that city the
other day, a negro boot-black
exclaimed, "Cole's circus done
come at lastl" b1 guuL
A woman having read in a
poem about a SIMEON that"swept
the plains," is urging her hus-
band to get one of them new
tangled things for her to use in
the kitchen. 81
A boy will go ilr swimming
and fool around the water for
hours together, but when told to
wash his face he will have almost
a hydrophobic dread of half a
pint Of water in a basin.
A Cincinnati physician, whose
speciality was the treatment of
idiots, was very mad at his neigh
Dor, the editor, who meant to be
complimentary when he spoke
of the physician as the celebra-
ted idiot doctor. 0 rT
"A Bostonian, who was nomi-
mated for a political office went
TO his wife and said that before
he accepted he wanted to know
whether any member of her
family had ever been engaged
in any disreputable transactions.
She said, "Bettcr decline. ~
"This suspense is killing mel"
said a murderer who was await
ing decision as to whether he
should die or not. "Oh, you
wait till they settle the matter"
said the jailor; "you'H find out
how suspense kills. You don't
know anything about it yet. "
"lIy DEAR" said a sentimental
maiden to her lover, "of what
do these autumnal tints, this
blazing garniturc of the dying
year,remind you?" Pancakes"
he promptly answered. And
then she realized, Tor the first |
time, that two hearts did not
beat as ono. 80 -ff rair Fl |
AeDutchman who married his
second wife soon after the funer-
al of the first, was visited with a
two hours serenade in token of
disapproval. He expostulated
pathelically thus: II say, poys,
you oughtto be ashamed ofyom-
self to be making all dish noise
ven der vas funeral here SO
soon." a.DlDaa 58 ..IH .fat 4
"How came these holes in
your elbows?" said a widowed |
mother TO her only son. "Oh, |
| hid behind the sofa
when ColonelGobler was saying
to Maria that he'd take her, even
if you had to be thrown in, and |
he didn't know / was there; and
SO l held my tongue and laugh
ell in my sleeves till | burst
'em."
FfrgIl.LaLD 1870 L.I /
"Henry is so PRACTICAL" said
Mrs. Youngwife. "When moth
er went into the country last
year Henry sent all her things
after her the next day; he said
she might want some of them,
you know. And IT'S kind O.
funny" she went on, "mother
did want them, for she has new
er come back TO live with us
since. Wasn't it queer?''
A Kansas paper publishes
|'fourteen rules to be observed !
during tornado." When a
man in that country sees a torna-
do comingshe instantly jerks off
his hat and reads the rules past I
ed therein. BY the time he has
got through he is either blown
over into the next county or the
tornado has got fifty miles be-
yond him. bGG ,jG
l.