The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1880-11-13


-Mamms-"Why, my dear Willie, ,wha
in the world is the matter with little Oscar
head ?" Willie-"Well, we're playin' will
liam Tell and somehow my arrow won
hit the apple, but keeps pluggin' his eye
and nose"
"A little niece of Professor Raymond
heard her father use the telephone an,
shout "hullo," after he said his say. Sh
came to repeat her prayers one night at he
mothers knee: "Now | lay me down l.
sleep. Please God seud me new doll
hullo 2"
Gilbert Stuart, the portrait painter
said to have met lady in tho streets Of Bos
ton who accosled him with: "Ah, Mr.. Stuart
have just seen your likeness nd kissed ID
because it was so much like you" "And
did it kiss you in return ?" "Why, no.
"Then," said the gallant painter, at was no
like me-"
al don't believe much in history" said I
modern miss, "and particularly the histori
ofCinderella. In my opinion there neve
was any sucn a person" Thereupon shl
went to the lookihggl glass and powdered he'd
self Iuriously, in vain attempt. To conceal
the too brilliant color which bad been proI
duced by her efforts In get on n No. shoe.
A young man who had signed the pledg,
entered a BARRIERS shop, and at the close d
the shave, the knight of the rszor comment
ced bathing the mans face with rum, wheI
he was spmewhat taken back by an excla
nation, "Look nut have signed the pledgl
and | won't have that stuff SO near IN
mouth w
-"Childrcn over seven years pay hall
fare" "oh, you speak English, do you
And what is your age, Missy? ?" "Vich sgei
Mamma says have two ages. Ven and
in &c railway | am six and alt, and ven
am at home am eight"
When the teacher was relating the par
able of the Prudigal Son, and was Just at thd I
interesting point where the father and sod
meet she was interrupted by liltle boy
who, with an eye la business with which lid
was probably already acquainted, asked
Yes; but what became OF the hogs?"
When we read the statistics OF education 4
in Russia We get new cause of the disconI
tent Of the people, aud find another justifl
cation of the hatred Of the despotic Govern
ment. A Russian journal Of education
shows that il all The Russian people are d
he educated, there will he 900 new schooli
wanted in the ST. Petersburg district, 2,6Od
IN that "i NoysorHl, aud, not to mentioIl
other instances, as many as 5000 10 that o|
Charkow.
Mr.. Kinglake is said Ia have stipulated
that the new volume (which has made the
Loudon Times SO fIrious) Of his history Of
the Crimean war should not be given oud
to the press until twenty-l four hours after ID
had been handed TO a number of bis friends
and they on their part were bound not d
give 1t to any newspaper. Many attemptd
were made by tbs daily papers in London
to get an Advance copy but without success
Blackwoods were Arm and Mr. Kinglske|
was immOvable.
The vagaries Of Emmet, the popular
actor, continue to interest the Western ctiee
in which he is appearing. lie is usually
taken IN hand by the manager Of the thea
tire m winch be Is engaged to appear and
Kent a close lY.srusr. ttlt -.,,,...t 49,. A., ~;
away ann when i'uai Is completely beside
himself with drink. HE performances on|
tie stage are often maudlin, aud physieiens
say that bis brain is permanently adecIed +.
Whenever he breaks an engagement be
pays The damages with re,.kless pr,iieality
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