The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-10-05
PASSING SMILES.


Despairing old maids look lang
uishingly even on rain bows.
A recent discovery is telephone
talked 10 death by Il barber.
A tramp called his SHOES corpora
lions" because they hatt no soles'
The battle of the uni0n--ijghiing
bet ween husband and wife.
Authors are spoken of as dwelling
in atlics, because so few Of them are
able to live on tLeir first story.
"a fifty.cent fan makes as much
wind as q fiity.dollar one" YES
and it's just the Same with political
orators. 10 i ige
| An Irish judge thus sentenced o
prisoner "YOn are to be hanged and
hope it will prove q warning to
you"
| a tourist IN Virginia says he has
been informed that wherever an old
virginian is buried a bed oi mint
Esprings up. s.ii !et ii
"Yes | want my daughter TO study
rhetoric" )" said the Vermont mother,
"for she cant fry pancakes now with
out smoking the house all mp"
Distracted mother--'.If you chill
drem make such n noise | shall go out
of my mind" Young Rip-"Go on,
mother; I'll mind the young ilIis
while you're gone. 3 iis Aae s8f
"IIow like its father II is!r ex,
claimed tue nurse, ON the occasion OF
the christening of a baby wh0ss
father was over seventy, and had
married a young wife. VERY like,
replied atiricaI lady, "it hasn't a
tooth in its head" ia Aia H
, People often complain of hare
times from mere natural tendenc,
. to growl, but a Georgia dnrkcy lh'
, other day sAid: "Nebcr seed sicl
times since was born. Work nj
| day and steal all night, and blesse,
i'll kin hardly make libbin'."
A gallant old gentleman by th,
Z name OF Pnge, finding young lady
glove alta watering place, pre-ente'
il to her with the following words:
"If from your glove you take tic lette, G.,
Your glove is Iove-which devote to thee.
, To which the lady returned th
following neat answer.
,It from thc,pagc you take the letter r,
\ our Page is ags, and that won't do for me-
A gentleman informed by II bill o
the window of n house, that apart
!, menis " ere 10 be let" knocked AT III
I, door, aud, attended by pretty fe
d male, took u survey oi the premise
e Spray. my DEAR" said lie smilin.
/ "age you TO be lei with these lods
: ingsi" NO" replied the .fHe q
9 chdmbre with vivacity, but | ain
be let alone.
"A A gentleman ordered his serval
a. "a regular Pap to awake him al
Ie o'clock that he might get ready
y start at Z by an oarly coach, IN viii,
:. he had taken his place for the conntr
The gentleman awoke and called h
man: ,'What O'Clock is il II" "Jnst
YOU hoaor.n s"SeyeD,-did Inot tc
YOU to wake me atG?" "Yes sir
| 'And why did you not?' Becaus
ail'your honor was asleep.
A young man with an extreme
n powerful voice was IN doubt VIII
branch Of musical art TO adopt. u
went to the composer Cherubini +
advice. Suppose you sing me fe
a. bars" said the master. Tho youi
! fellow sang 40 loud that the wal
fairly shook. Now, ",said he;"wil
do you thiak lam best fitted for
"Auctioncct,' dryly replied Cher
bini. ao ais
n A good minister out West preach'
|e- a sermon on peace -inaking, mined
of two oi tire deacons Of his church W
X. had long been at swords points; NJ
i such was his elnqnencc and carnc,
:. ness that directly alter the bcnetll
~ tion was pronoHAceds one Of Z
at deacons went Uveri0 the other q
I remarked, with tcats In his ey
'or Brother Siiggins, after snch A
ng mon there must he peace between