Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1880-05-05
THE FUNNY BABES.

MAoD, lu.- arlstocratic child:) Chow
pretty ar Il clever you are, mother p L
ail 30 glad you married into our family"
6. "A" said a little year-old.
there's man out there who would
give anything to see you. "Who it it,
my son?" cts blind man."
JOHNNY says his mother makes great
cry if his sister goes out without her
shade hat. She don't want her to get
freckled, but she don't seem to care how
much his father tans him.
ADA (aged FOUR, who was doing some
thing, and was told to desist by her
mother. Mother" Ada, am [ to speak
to you again ?" Ada-"Yes, ma, you
may, if you like"
A BRIGHT little girl, who had success
fully spelled the word "that," was asked
by her teacher what would remain after
the had been taken away "The dirty
cups and saucers,'' was the prompt re-
ply.
AFTER a sharp fash of lightning the
other day, a little five-year-old Essex
boy looked up to his mother and said:
Mamma, guess God scratched pref
ty big match that time, don't you p
W AtCf O"f0 \CO1It.J [1UCCf ECttN.
AN Illinois youth, husking corn in a
field near the railroad, saw a new loco
motive, with a red smoke stack. He
became frightened, and ran to the house
crying: "That ERE engine is going to
bust, sure; it's red hot clean to the top
of the stove-pipe."
A LITTLE girl once said that she would
be very glad to go to heaven because
they had plenty of preserves there. On
being cross examined she took down her
catechism and trlumphantly read: "Why
ought the saints to love God ?" Answer
-"Because he makes, preserves and
keeps them"
A FIvE-YEAR-oLD daughter of one of
our citizens obserbed to him, in the
presence of company, at breakfast;
"You mustn't go off without kissing me,
papa 81 never forgetto do it, do I?"
he asked, surprised. "Youmaynot for
get, but sometimes you go off mad, you
KNOW she artlessly replied. The COM
pany consulted their offee.-Danbu1y
Meas.
"MoTHER," said the seven-year-old
son of an energetic mother not thou
sand miles from Rochester, the other
day, as he watched her vigorous manipu-
lation of kitchen utensil, "you ought
not to go to heaven" "Why not, my
son?" in surprised manner. "Be-
cause you would wear out your harp be-
fore eternity was half over" was the
quiet reply of the young philosopher.
He had been sitting still so long that
the mother expected to find him asleep
when she looked around and asked.
"Well, Harry, what are you thinking
of?'' "Ma, are we very rich 90 he SOL
emily inquired, by way of reply SIN
one way we are, }" she said: "your faith
er says he values me at three millions of
dollars, you at two million dollars and
the baby at one." That closed the con-
versation on that subject, but next morn
ing, as Harry was getting on his over
coat he examined the new patch which
had been added, and coolly observed:
Well, think father had better sell off
about half Of you or the whole of the
baby, and get the rest of us some decent
buds to put on"
The following pleasant thing in Ihe
way of definition once occurred in one
of the public achools of city in Massa-
chusetts. A member of the committee.
Captain K, was visiting the school, and
the class having read from Webster's ad-
dress at Plymouth, the captain asked the
class, "Who was Webster?" One boy
said, ''a statesman;' another, San ora
tor" ''But what is a statesman % asked
the captain. GA man who goes around
making speeches. answered a boy.
"That is not quite right replied the
captain; CT go around sometimes making
speeches, but I am not statesman A
bright little fellow spoke up, "I know.
1t is man who goes around making
good speeches.