The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1880-05-08
SATURDAY MORNING, MAY s.

deestrik furnisht him. and his bills shell not be
looked into very closely. In saving ones ken
try patriot must be libral. Wat is paltry
dross compared with the good Nv ones kentry?
And Major MGrath?''
replide tibet the Major was not altogether
satisfied with givin' the sage nv Moo York the
nomination, but tibet wuz satisfied he wuz
waitin' to be seen.
'See him. Find out eggSackly how much he
wants, and promise him anything in the way
NV offises that he requires. In the great work
nv savin ones common kentry promises can't
be too freely made. Offer him the post-offis
there"
"Honored and patriotic SIR l replide,
that offs hez bin already promised to three
men,
.'Hev they sense to keep their mouths shet
till after the Convenshun?"
II feer not, patriotic and honored sir"
"Then offer him furrin mishun and small
amount NV mummy in hand. Thank the Lord,
sed he fervently, "for Turin mshuns. 700
don't hev TO specify, and there CRATE meny
NV EN-. 700 kant hev two Post Offices
in one place; but there are CRATE
meny Turin mishuns and CRATE meny
more kin be made eff need be, to save our COM
mon kentry. / hev alluZ believed that our
common kentry wuz not properly representa-
abroad, and tibet Their ought to be at leest one
Consul for evry Congressional Deestrik, and
twict ez meny full mishuns hate to bubble
up but what kinsf do? Their amt nothin I
sake 1 am bein drawd out Nv retirement; for
its sake am willing to serve ez its President;
for its sake / am willin to open jest eZ meny
barl's ez my unbought friends desire; and she'll
| hesitate for its sake to promis the same offs
to five men? Never! No troo patriot would
balk at so small thing ez that. Let 'em come.
They shell hev all they want. Kin Kunnel
Simmons be depended onto?"
''Honored and patriotic sir, Kunnel Sim
mons adores you in his heart, am certain.
Ittnf4 Ill ctn14
bles, and he hez hesitated to see witch candi-
date wood give"
Il understand the Kunnel and L am his
man. Ashoor the Kunnei that the Collector
ship NV his districk--"
But, honored and patriotic SIR 1 replied,
looking at my memorandum, THAT offs hez
bin promist to four men alreddy."
$50 it hez,' replied the patriot, $50 it hez.
Very good. He must hev a Turin mishun.
Tell him to select any one he likes and give
him my word for it. Will that answer?''
Better than anything. The Kunnel is so
heavily in debt that residence abroad wood
SCOT him better than to remain at home. He
Good hev the flag NV our common kentry wavin
over his oils, witch wood console him for his
enforced eggslle. He wood prefer the flag Nv
his common kentry over his offs in Guate-
maula 10 the Sheriff's flag over his house in
Kentucky. The Sheriff's flag is lurid red,
and is not varigated enuff fur him.
There wuz sum more arrangements Nv like
nacher, when | bid the great and good man
good-by, and departd fur my field NV labor.
Don't forgit," sed he as he rung my hand
at partin, "that the Colectorship at Louisville
is yourn.'
shant forgit it, but ez it hez bin promised
to SIX other patriots, to my certin knollege, |
shant buy brown stun house to-morrer on
the strength Nv it. Whether git that or not
hey got wat hev in my pokket, and shell
hev the post offs at the Corners, bein ez L am
the only Dimocrat in that rejun witch kin
/ am R,rfN Mr.
Tilden is troo patriot, and does love his CON-
mon kentry. Hopefully,
PETROLEUM Y. Massey.
[Tildenl