Orange County observer. [volume] (Hillsborough, N.C.) 1880-1918, 1880-11-20
Spicy Paragraphs.

Political stra As show which way the
candidate blows.
Pay as you GO isn't the rule a the
theatre. II is pay as YOU come III.
4 farmers life cannot be monoto I.
nous; they labor in so many different |
fields. 1
The reason a Wonan's minute is soi
long is because her watch is nevef
wound up.
There are fourteen different RENE
dies for sea-sichness. the best being t,
20 ashore.
/. The person who is continually brag-
gin- about his descent has nothing de
cent to brag about.
When one man greets another with
hello, the latte rangrily retorts I'm
no. a telephone.'
cannot even securet the respect of atirst-
class wa,herwoman.
When "a MAJ calls you a zoo through
tle telephone, it does no good TO shake
your fist at the tranSmitter.
The organ-grinder who owns an in
strunlent that plays but four al rs is the
architect Of his own FORTUNES.
Most people are satisfied with one
garment in the spring, but painters
frequently put Oh three or four coats.
4 fussy little ma at a large public
meeting is about Of as much conse-
4ucnce as an elephants tail in fly
time.
Themodern female costume hampers
wolnen in all their movements. They
cannot even strike a match on their
heel.
II it is sinful for one to dance, it is
sinful for az to whistle, and if it is sim
fal to whistle we are all miserable sim
nprS.
You can't suit a man anyway. He
VIII SCOT at the microscopic bonnet on
the street and growl at the aspiring
one in the theatre.
The reason. the Moffett bell-puncll
wouldn't work was because the tired
barkeeper seldom had time to sound it
between drinks.
"When I die said a weary hus-
band, II want to go where there are no
more fires to make" perhaps you
may said his good wife.
The exasperated owner of a corner
store has put up a sign reading:
Wanted, the ten LATEST men in town
to loaf on this corner"
Seth Green should turn his attention
to the rapid depletion Of the stock Of
worms. One boy will use up seventy
five worms in catching three fish and
all boys go fishing.
The sting of a bee is really only one
fourth Of an inch long but if you make
that statement to a man who has jus,
got outside of one, he'll tell you tina;
you lie like a book agent.
No one knows whoinvented the fash.
ion of turning down the corner of :
visiting card, but the fashion of turn
ing down the corner of a street wa:
first thought of by the man who oweC
toan approaching creditor a long stand
ing bill.
VI am astonished, my dear your
lady, at your sentiments; you max,
me START "Well, sir, pve been wait
ing for you to start this last hour"
"Digby, will you take some of thi
butter" NO, thank you, ma'am, be
long to the temperance society-can'
take anything strong,' replied Dighy
\ merchant may manage to CRU
along without advertising, and so ma,
a man empty a hogshead of water Will
a teaspoon, but both are decidedly ted
ious undertakings.
The class in grammar will pleas
stand up now and answer this ques
ton: How do you parse the word do,
tar PLEASE, if it's trade dollar, yo
parse It for ninety cents.'
\ proper conclusion for the marriag
/ ceremony in many Of our fashionabl
! society wedding would be: "NVha
I G. numerical interests have joined t.
r -ether, let notiil-temper put asunder.
The Boston -iduertiser says that .
vessel lately left the shores of the Ne,
{ World for benightcd Africa, icarryin
a 10000 gallons ofrum and one mission
! ary.' They'll have enough to was
1 him down with, unless he's very al
a
DOmeStir Eeo0nnu