The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1880-05-25
and by.

T. tie interest. existence and perpetuAtion,
and newspapers, throughout the whole Nation
UAs then decided that scandal and sin
Wsre inst as essential a. lager or GIN
without which we frankly confessed to being
a busted community" So we sat fiat down
on-that is, on the floor and bumped our heads
together in desperation. And We never got up
until. Tom Sawyer like, we had resolved that
- something must be done" but just what was
10 he done, or how, or by whom-blest if any
Of US ever thought OF that part of the pro-
gramme, and that's why there was no report
last week.
When next the reporter made the rounds, be
found that wonderful change had come over
the spirit OF their dreams, if you will allow him
10 make use of a thread bare expression. They
were all chewing tobacco and splitting as big as
life. and even offered the reporter a cigarette
paper. while they whispered benevolently among
themselves that a. the ways of providence are
past finding out" An explanation of their reck-
less extravaganza and sudden wonderful liberal
IT. will be found below
JUSTICE CAMERON.
runaway from Georgia,
Maxwell. Samuel by name.
To this town, or hereabOuts,
Unfortunately came.
H got I" job somewhere but one day when
he was riding along on piously disposed mule,
Cornelius Bryant wickedly jumped out and
bOohed," causing that ani-mule to take q sud-
Zen and unceremonious farewell of Sim, where
upon the latter arose, pushed back his hat, smote
his brow and vowed Vengeance, and continually
followed Cornelius like an evil Nemesis
Until. one day, not long ago,
Perhaps twas fate arranged It 60.
Cornelius. muleback. came . dAshin'
By and riding woman fashion.
sim opportunity had come;
He boohed awful BOBBY gum
Cornelius nose plowed up the sands,
As he struck square knees and hands
Cornelius and gAzed at his clothes,
And blew out the sand that had lodged In his nOss,
lntimating TO Sim that he would thrash him;
Bni Sim Was toe quick, and, with big stick,
Cornelius Was banged and battered and bruised
And otherwise very unpleAsantly used.
.: course, Cornelius telt uncomfortable, demon
aized and demolished after this bit of rehearsal
and he sent big policeman and his badge to
spread snares and nets for Sim, (who sometimes
called himself Samuel, for short and who, in an
evil moment, was scooped in out Of the wet and
lodged in durance vile. The next morning he
made his appearance before the tribunal, his LEFT
gist decorated with heavy bracelet from
which dangled q rather ponderous piece of jew
elry. that would have been considered entirely
too fiashy, if not absolutely vulgar, by our loud
81 and snobbiest swells and handles. An at
iendant was employed whose sole duty it was 70
look after the loose end of that ornament. His
Honor received him with magisterial authority
and dignity, and read to him the greetings Of
the court. He acknowledged that he had sup
Piled Cornelius with dressing" and, strangely,
IN 80 doing. had almost addressed him. When
his bill was brought in from the County Board
ing House. and the costs and fines summed up,
he was discovered TO be Just es25 in arrearA
When last seen he was promenAding the street
with . policeman in search Of somebody who
wanted " to hire . cullud boy" Cornelius was
also cullud
Later, the court informs Us that Sim had been
given thirty days additional.
A case Of larceny comes up before this court
10 day.
MAYOR BERNREUTRR.
The day has arrived" remarked his Honor
10 the reporter, as he turned over the leaves Of
The docket, when the supremacy of the pen
over the sword-the superior might Of the tongue
to that OF the clenched prehensile orgAn il to b
demonstrated-proven-ack acknowledged accept
I'd Indeed, such is already the case. As an illus
irAtiOn Of this fact," continued he, turning to the
latest written page, here are the names Of foul
individuals. appearing in succession, the charge
opposite each being precisely the same pro
lane. indecent and abusive language The fri
That Of an ebony hued nympA du PAX, Eliza
Hail.
All, an euphOniOw title" suggested the 70
porter
fe, POD Jnnn1 ~ sometime" wagxishly ~
piled hi Honor. And then, realizing tho ghast.
ines Of the pun, he hung his lead and conghsd
recovering. he continued: The Othen an
wesley Jenkins. Hush 0vsns"-
No doo't" MD he reporter.
Dealt whar
Doas eve Haz, y any ogksr maa." And
"a ~ Roae siassd WHY ct IL sspussm cd