The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1880-08-12
All Sorts of Paragraphs.

All Sorts Of Paragraphs.
A MERE matter OF Cutting 4
dress.
WHEN a mans aft collar button comes
off his choler rises.
3 IHE trouble in this country is not 80 /
much that we cannot raise coffee as that
we can't settle it. =, s. .g 7
We are told ssthe evening wore on
but we are never told what the evening
wore on that occasion. Was it the close
Of summers day?
JONES says it isn't the color Of her hair
that troubles him in choosing a help
mate. The color Of her money is what
interests him vastly more.
YES, said witness, 81 remember
the defendants mother crying on the oc-
casion referred to. She was weeping
with her left. eye-the only one she has
and the tears were, running down her
right Cheek What" exclaimed the
Judge. chow could that be ~ ssPlease
your Honor" said the witness, " she was
awfully cross-eyed."
A DAMsEL from over the river Nns
looking over some books in Quincy
bookstore, endeavoring to make se}ec-
ton, when the clerk asked, Glow
would you like the sAutocrat Of the
Breakfast Tablet" She replied: "Oh,
we've got two Of 'em now, one of 'em
just as good as new-only been washed
twice. "-Moder7s A7.go.
You must not play with that little
girl, my DEAR said an iniudicious par
ent. But, ma, I like her; she is d
good little girl, and I am sure she
dresses as pretty as ] do, and she has
lots of toys 90 I cannot help that. nv
DEAR" replied the foolish mother; 'shet
father is shoemaker" 'sBut I don't
play with her father 7 play with her;
she amt shoemaker =
A YANKEE came running down to q
pier just as steamer was starting. The
boat moved off some four or five yaras.s
as he took jump, and, coming down on
the back Of his head on deck, he lay
stunned for two or three minutes. When
he came to the boat had gone the best
part Of a quarter Of a mile, and, raising
his head and hooking to the shore,
the Yankee said :: 6 Great Jehosa-
plat, what a jump. s56 .,s!.:. II
TAE earliest method of engraving was
upon wood, which was known to the
Chinese before the Christian era, but
was not known in Europe until the middle
ages, when it was introduced by the In
habitants of the Celestial empire. En-
craving upon metallic substances was
not practiced in Europe until the first
half Of the fifteenth century, although
it is probable that the art in this form
was also known to the Chinese long be
fore.
The Family Physicin,s says that
there Is no more valuable Indication Of
disease than the temperature of the body
rs measured by the thermometer, and
especially i'll the case Of children. 1t
gives early information Of disease, and
admits Of an infected child being get
apart before mischief is done. The
Physicio'e consequently advises mothers
to learn hoy to use a, clinical thermome-
ter-a very simple process. The proper
temperature of the body is SO. degrees
Fahrenheit.
A YOUNG mother, in despair Of ever
teaching her idle little girl, aged 4. her
letters, and thinking that perhaps the
child knew more than she would admit.
said g Now, Katie, I won't try to teach
you to-day; you shall be mother, and
shall teach me my letters. 2 6 May [
really and truly be mother p said Katie.
Yes, my darling" ssLet's begin,
then, was the response. ssYou have
been very good child to-day and you
may have a whole holiday e and Katie
shut up the book and ran off laughing.
WE have often read OF thumb pots for
plants. An egg she'll is 9 very mex
pensiye one, and answers its purpose
well break one end little larger than
you do the other, making simply small
hole; then fill with earth, and If you
wish to put plants in them, set in box
the height Of the shell; fill the spaces
with earth the plants start splendid1y,
and can be taken out and handled very
easily. As the she'll is much lighter
than pots, they are more desirable for
shipping; fill tho space with moss OF
any light substance used for that pNr-
pose. Y,
A STORY is told IN India Of parrot
which had learned SO many phrases Of
English that it constructed q grammar
Of the language, and, being missed one
day, was at last found perched on the
top Of a tanarind tree, instructing all
the parrots Of the neighboring jungle On
the rndiments Of syntax There are
people disposed to disbelieye parrot
stories, YET some OF Ilem can De posi-
lively substanhated. So, for instance,
one Of our respected citizens, wooing q
widow, was interrupted at critical
moment IN his fervent address by voice
from the cage il the window, asking IN
sorroWing tones g g Who kissed the
cook r.
A CLERGYMAN Cnce visited a lady ct
his parish who had just lost her has
band, in order to offer consolation, and,
upon her earnest inquiries as to the re-
union Of families Ia heaven, he strongly
asserted his belief in that fact and
when she asked with anxiety whether
any time must elapse before friends
would be able to find each other in the
next world, he emphatically said g No ]
they will be united at once. He was
thinking Of the happiness Of being able
to offer the relief of such faith, when
she broke in upon his meditations by Ell
claiming, sadly, 8 We'll. his first 1O!:Je
has got him, then, By this time 4