The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1880-11-25
AScandalOuS Dog.

| EHNOE upon u Gine IneiO ''No IL
4 the city of New York wealthy
NJ old gentleman, who had a way
| E3S ward son. The young man
liked to run with the boys, and
: managed to use up considerable of
the old gentleman's substance for
wine suppers, fast teams and other
unholy designations. Consequent
ly, this young man was always in
need-of ready cash and continually
making acquisitions on his COVER
nor's exchequer.
At last the old gentleman took a
tumble, whatever that may mean;
but the young man, describing the
course his father had concluded to
pursue, remarked to a friend that
the old man had taken a tumble.
This said tumble consisted IN his
notifying his son and heir that from
that on and henceforth he'd get no
more cash for any funny business,
and the old fellow was as good as his.
word. Down in his heart of hearts
the Young man was grevious sore,
but he assumed a smile though he
felt it not, and made earnest pro
testations of reform. Meanwhile
be kept on running with the boys,
on tick. Tick is one of those things
that has a limit, and one day the
wayward son found himself at the
end of his rope, so to speak, and at
his wits ends for funds to keep up
his end with the other boys, and,
after canvassing the matter in his
mind and assuring himself that the
old gentleman was memorable and
that no coin could be squeezed out
OF him on square proposition, he
hit upon happy expedIent. Enter
ing the paternal presence, and as
Stunning look of business, he said:
"Father, have you read about
that man over IN Brooklyn that can
teach dogs to talkY'
If the old man had been in the
halcyon days of youth, he would
probably have said, "whatyergivin-
us" but, being the father of fam
ily, he said: "What nonsense are
YOU talking about now"
"Fact. sure's you live" said the
Young hopeful. "Pve seen the thing
myself. and / don't know but what
it might he a good idea to take old
Tige over and have him taught;
talking dog would be a cheerful
thing to have about the house, and
would make lots of amusement for
the children"
"My son." returned the father,
solemnly, ~ am an old man, and
I've seen a powerful sight OF the
world, and 1 tell you that this is an
age of humbug."
That's all right, father, but ism t
it likewise an age of progressP Look
at the locomotive, and the tele-
phone. and the Atlantic cable. and
the patent what do-you call-em, and
all those other things they didn't
know of in the days of our revolu-
tionary fathers"
Certainly. certainly, my son;
glad to see you showing such knowl-
edge of the worlds progress. And
YOU really think the man can teach
dogs to tslkT
@Sure pop! But it don't cost a
cent if it's a failure. The profes
sor says he don't want any money
if the dog can't be taught IN one
week to carry on conversation
with anv body. The terms are just
these: You take the dog over and
paw $50 in advance; if at the end OF
a week the dog can't talk, you get
vour $50 back; but if he can talk,
you give $50 more, making an even
hundred for the lesson.
"Well, it would be odd to have
old Tige talking around the house,
and 1 guess we'll try the thing any
how. You may take the dog over
this afternoon, if you like
And the old man went down IN
his "kick," as the boys call it, and
handed the boy $50 note.
Tige left the house that day.
From day to day the old gentle
man inquired of his son as to the
progress Tige was making in his
studies. The invariable reply OF
the sor was: "The professor says
he's Just getting on fine, and Ia go
ing to make talker from the base -
At last the eventful day came
when Tige was to be brought home,
and the young man took the other
fifty from his trusting parent That
evening he came home without the
dog.
%Where's Tiger" asked the gov
ernor.
"See here, father" said the young
man, "Ive got something to say
that won't do to speak out before
all the family. I'd like to have five
minutes conversation with YOU II
another ROOM"
Father and son retired to another
room, locked the door, stuffed papel
in the key-hole, and the young mar
spoke as follows:
"Well, / went over to BrookIyi
and got Tigc, and ne was Oh eadfu
glad to see me, you bet. When w
got on the boat just thought IL
have a little talk with the old dog
to kind of get him broke in, and as
tonish the folks when he got home
We sat down ct the bow of tn
boat, and l SAID: How do, Tiger
"'Pooty WE'LL says he; 'how's thu
folksT"