Connecticut western news., 1880-06-23
WIT AND WISDOM.

..zss WIT AND WISDOM
 A WOMAN is always child.
 WoRDs are the key of the heart.
 THE trade of woman Is very hard. MEN make the laws, women make the customs. sasNlG i1RE st.T,s aea
 THE iron horse has but one ear--the engineer. ,s. sisrl.-,.e 5-.,f
 THE greatest merit of many husbands is their wives. '-' -- ~-
 GRIEF counts the min nutes; happiness forgets them. ' ,taQs9 n bLW geF--
 N1ovB, to give portrait is to prom ise the original. .Sss9
 MANY a property owner is poor in purse but rich in deed. lg sees
 INNocENT1Y to amuse the imagination in this dream of life, is wisdom,
 AGE that lessens the enjoyments of life increases our desire of living. SPARKLING acress 8 garden fence admits of a good deal being said on both sides.
 ALL indications point. to the fact that this will be a good year for sea7sickness I THE greatest.'liar generally keeps his word, as he can't find anybody who will take it. v,., q, s..-. p -fr
 [ PAINTING window shutter is O good deed in more ways than one.s It helps the blind. .7.4l;;r ;rgisgT ti asaas sE .-,
 THE cashierran away with all the funds and the directors placarded the. door |: "No cashier. p.s D ,syg -ssE--.
 THE only things that can blow for themselves and be admired the more, the more they blow, are the flowers. | A PH1L2DE1PHA antiquarian who mar ried young widow says she is the most interesting relict he has ever found.
 OUR ancestors; the monkeys, couldn't have been So ig1fofant after all. They were all educated in the higher branches.
 EDUoATH your boy to be a railroad brakeman. There are seven Senators who started life in that line of business. s, IT MAKES noh difference to n l.is.n who is down whether he slipped on banana peel or stubbed his toe against peach stone, ,,; t,..,.a, ,,a s.,,.. t,....
 RUNNING 8 newspaper, says the White hall Tinaes, is very much like running bicycle. If you stop treading the wheel, down you'll go. vss.,..s '.
 7 AMONG the assets of grocer who failed in business in Wisconsin town is put down: "One liver pad, wcrn six weeks worth 30 cents. 1" s sas. ,rhe
 THE time may come when men con- victed of murder will be sentenced to lecture, and the entire penalty will really fall upon the public ss, ri ..xsa JOSH B1nnINes has found one thing that money cannot buy, and that is the ! wagl of9a dogs tail. 1t is an honest expression of opinion on the partyof the dog. esai al.3 io gsrp as~g J454s. | A PRETTY answer was given by little Scotch girl. When her class was ex- amined, she. replied to the question, "What is patienoe2" "Wait g wee, and dinna weary. - ''as ,1ars-l. d "a. sa,,as4
 SETH GREEN says that if the State would only protect the fish it plants, there eould in aifew years be five fish g day for each person Well, who wants five fish adaya ol basssq ad aim h.s
 THE brilliant Sophie Arnold, when she heard of certains diplomatist that had been eaten by4the wolves, exclaimed: "Poor brutes lsa Hunger must indeed be a terrible thing;l''3,g San .asaly s..
 WHEN spelling is 'sreforned' she U write | .ls@2a ss'Im sailing on the oshun,sl s The SC is h no-sale in site, > It filz me with emoshun."
 But one "spel" will not change it's name, For she'll be se-sic jest the sain ta1 l A STRANGER passing churchyard and seeing a hearse standing hard by, in ouired who was dead. The sexton in- formed him. .eWhat compIaint?" asked the induisftive one. Said the old man "There is no complaint; everybody is satisfied. D s''' M ssasssaAa
 A LADY and her daughter. called on 1 Governor Littlefeld, of Rhode Island, the other day, with special request that the Governor should kiss the daughter. There is no end to the ad- yantages of office-holdinG remarks the Buffalo Express. V 4 '..ts
 |, t"sDo, DO KEEP away from that win dow," said he. But I'm not afraid of the lightning, replied she. "Ah, dear," continued the youth, frantically, ":little do you realize how attractive you are 1" And having made this appeal he was able to conduct Ter away. . s,~v | ROBERT GATES, of Derby, Conn, has just taken a large needle from the neck of his COW. It had been taken in with the animals food. The animal doubt less found it in a haystack, which shows I that needle can be found there, not
 withstanding the prevalent opinion to the contrary. q e'pdoju
 : CHowDER got good dinner at home a
 few days ago by telling his wife that he 7 was going to. bring a judge home with F him to that meal. When he arrived, 5 alone, and Mrs sChowder asked him where } the judge, was, he triumphantly pointed 5 to himself, refnafking sss1'm good i judge of q dinner. ' s, He win be obliged 5 to get adinner in some other w9y here- . l after, .sEti 7xket $