Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-06-17
A Lonr.Felt Want SupplIel.

A Long.Felt Want Supplied.
In these days Of labor-saving achieve
ment, invention follows invention In
such quick and continuous succession,
that not only is It difficult to keep pace
with the record, but seemingly the most
startling announcements arc received
with as little emotion rs would be ex-
cited by the report that another asteroid
had been discovered, or that another
bank cashier had spontaneously depart
ed for Europe in company with o few
hundred thousand dollars saved from
the depositors.
But to the year of grace 1880 and the
fortunate town of Stratford in Connec-
ticut, belong the honor Of presenting
the world with what may be truly called
one of the most important inventions OF
the age. This boon 10 humanity Is
nothing less than abreech-loading pipe,
which can be discharged and reloaded
without relighting.
As with all radical improvements In
mechanics. we presume that this pipe
of peace" as it may well be called, Is
the result of sudden inspiration after
tedious years spent in loading and I'M
loading, lighting and relighting the
ephemeral and inconstant pipe that
has made life burden to so many
smokers since first the incense OF the
weed gentle was waited toward the blue
dome of heaven. A moments refiec-
ton will suggest to the most trivial
what q beneiicent invention this I'M
known genius has vouchsafed to a wait
ing world. Let us think of It little.
Estimating that it requires. say, six
minutes to fill pipe,-and this Is un-
der rather than over the time generally
allotted to that service, as we have been
informed by smokers whose reputation
for veracity has never been questioned.
and that the average smoker fills his
pipe twelve times day, the amount Of
valuable time spent in this hitherto
necessary operation Is alarming to con-
template. In one day, seventy-two
minutes, or one hour and twelve min
utes, are now given to it. Five hundred
and four minutes of each week, or eight
hours and twenty-four minutes, are re-
quired to replenish the pipe. The time
thus occupied amounts In one year to
26, 208 minutes, equivalent to eighteen
days, four hours and forty-eight min
utes; in ten years, to 262, 0S0 minutes,
or just 1S2 days, or two days over six
calendar months. In fifty years Of
smoking, we find that 1, 81 400 minutes
have been lost to the smoker In prepar-
ing his pipe for action.
In other words, $40 days, or two
years and six calendar months, have
been actually wasted. In one hundred
years-and century Of smoking Is no
uncommon thing, II we may believe the
biographies of the several hundred
4. IL l..
loss when the Father of his country de-
parted hence-the figures are utterly
astounding. Pipe-filling has stolen
from the centenarian's feeting years
1922, 800 minutes! This is equivalent
to /, 800 days, or within four days Of five
years! ,e
1t will be noticed in the above calcu-
lation that no account has been taken
of the time consumed in unloading or
in lighting. Rejecting from our COM
putation those smokers who never I'M
load a pipe-those whose depraved
taste makes them as content with ashes
as with tobacco-and il Is safe to say
that at least half an hour per diem is
given to unloading. striking an average
of all smokers, those Of tobacco and
those of ashes, Unfortunately. When
it comes to the matter of lighting the
brain actually reels ut the immensely of
the problem set before it for solution.
Always excepting the native Of the
Emerald Isle, whose superior attain
ments i'm pipe lighting are known and
recognized wherever winds blow and
tobacco is smoked, il is safe to say that
every pipeful of tobacco requires on an
average three matches to begin with.
In addition to these, before the pipeful
has become exhausted, 1t requires, say,
eleven other ligbtings of one match
each. Now the burning of fourteen
matches to each pipeful would exhaust
at the least seven minutes. Multiply
this by twelve and we have forty-two
minutes, or nearly quarter-hour each
day spent in the proftless task OF
scratching matches. But the matter Of
time is not the only question involved.
Estimating the smokers in the United
States at 100000, the twelve pipes
that each smokes per day destroys
156, 900, 600 matches; In one year, &c.
$40, 900, 600; in thirty years, ITO, $40, 900
matches! No wonder our timber lands
are fast becoming exhausted! Well
for us that this priceless invention has
stepped i'm In time to prevent an utter
denudation of our once forest-covered
land!
We are not informed as to the details
of this breech-loading pipe; but the
mere fact that it has been invented
gives such transcendent Joy that we
have no room for curiosity as to how
the sun,nuns bonum is brought about.
Sufficient unto the day is the glory
thereof.-Boston Transcript.