Feliciana sentinel. [volume] (St. Francisville, La.) 1877-1892, 1880-04-24

could make parcgoric out of umbrellas
and boil down an illustrated weekly pa
per into otto of roses. He has the blalt
edest ingenuity. You wouldn't believe
"Bnt your customers generally are sat
isfied ?"
| "Oh, yes. You see they don't know. A
doctor sends prescription here, written
IN dead language. We don't bother
ourselves to try to read it. ask the boy
! what's the matter with the patient. Then
! put little cayenne pepper IN some mo-
laSscs, ana touch herup with assafctida
to give her good, strong smell, and drop
IN some sGuills and ipccac to make Il
kihd OF Soncncss i'll the stomach. and
STIR in some worm wood to make her tallc
! hold of the insides, and then let her 90.
Patient thinks its splendid because it
tastes nasty; and the old man GETS the
money, and so eyeryhody's happy
There's Il woman around in Pine street
WIN iHhhago who deals with us, and one
day when forgot to put the assalctidn
IN the lotion, she sent around and threat
cned to prosecute us for malpractice. The
old man fixed up the next bottle so that
you coald have slnclt it in Asiatic Turkey
when tho cork was out. That seemed to
calm her."
''Do the physicians approve of that
kind of thing p
''oh, you know, thc doctors all work
share and share with the Old man. If 4
doctor secs woman going TO die any
how, he loads her up with drugs, and
then collects twenty-five pr cent. COM
mission from US. And so when we acct
dentally put in arsenic instead of glauhcr
salts, AMI II corvaICsccnt patient climbs
the golden stair, the doctor knows better
than to make a fuss about the mistake,
He wipes his eyes and tells he family he
81 " the disease would be fatal from the
first. We have anew boy here whomalcs
about four fatal blundcrs week. Never
gets hold Of any harmless drug when
there's Il deadly poison Within reach. The
old man hires hil1l for economy. Only
last week he sent a quart of laudauum to
a young Clergyman who sent for port
wine, and one of our best customers WIS
an angel in less than an hour. if that
boy was let so, perfectly loose to do just
as he pleased, bed fill all the cemeteries
in town before the month was ont, Vel
low fever and cholera combined are not
half rs dangerous as that boy"
"Whcrc is he -
'Why, he is out now. He took to Mrs.
Jones who has cerl bro-spinal meningitis,
, I, q
BlacAburn's baby and the baby got Mrs.
Jones prescription. You just notice when
you so by Blackburn's if there isn't Grape
on the door. 1 bet sou pound of cough
lozenges that baby was waited into the
mysterious realms Of the hereafter, three
quarters OF an hour ago. That boy never
knows where any thing is but the gum
drops and the licoricc. He can GO straight
to them every time. Here he cones now.
Say, Johnny, did you fix it all tight :"
"No.' said Il small boy, who entered at
the moment. "Iitacllburn'S baby got a
has gone up"
Il told you So said the clerk to me-
And turning to johnny, he said 'Iou
look sharp now. Go into the cellar and
mix the red paint with the old mans |
patent liver pads, and see if we amt
nearly ont OF lard and soft soap for his
Balm of Peru, for removing ficcIiles and
purifying the complcXion.'
"Why," said tho boy, drawing his head |
out Of the gum drop drawer: 1.-THE old |
man told nc he wanted the lard put UP
when I was done l should melt up tie |
glue for the jujube paste"
While the clerk argued he matter with |
lin paid for the soda water and with. |
lew. Both the clerk and lie boy struck !
nc as likely TO be very efficient as instru-
ucmts Of sudden dcatIl.--MAN Adcicr.