Martinsburg independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1875-1900, 1880-09-18
Poker BINS sermon.
A PECULIAR ADAPTATION OF TIE
s'sCRfPTER.'


"poker Billn having procured
bail since his last sermon, preach
ed in Leadville the fret Sunday
after martial law was proclaimed.
On ascending the platform he I'M
buckled his revolver and laid 1t on
the table with the remark that he
"kinder thawt concealed weapons
warn't the right outfit for gospel
preacher
His text was from Matthew Xxx,
| to 15. He said: partners, this
text rites about a man that own: i
vineyards. AS most of you are
more convarsent with straight rcd
Ticker and shafts, I will read mines
and propect notes instead of wine
yards
"'Thar war sartin man, who
was householder, who went out
early one morning to git men to
work on his own claims.
"sAnd he seed two tenderfeet,
and he struck bargain with them
to work on prospect fur $ia day.
And he went out again and
he seed three miners standing by
the Tontine saloon, and he sed 3;
"Ain't you afraid of martial law?
Amt you red Order No. g.? Go
to the Buckeye shaft and work q
week aud / will Civ yer what Is
squar."
"'And they wend.'
Partners, / will Jest say har
that / kinder don't swallow that
ar last lfne-but its Scriptur.
Nevertheless, and he went
agin at six o'clock and did the
same.
AND he went agin at eleven
o'clock, and he seed two miners
and one tenderfoot loafing, and he
sed: "Why don't yer work?
Sargint Grant will come alongand
hist yer In that calaboose or his"
"'And they sed: we want ter
work, but are a little Altered Of the
Miners Union
"'And he sed: yer got yer
guns, amt you? What are We
Altered of? Go to the Buckeye
shaft, and what Is squar | will Civ
YER and they went. Now, when
payday come, things got mixed.
He wanted to pay the m ners in
the Buckeye So a day, but, part
ners, they wouldn't have 1t, and
allowed as how one miner war
worth two tenderfeet, and as be
paid tenderfeet 81 day, the min
ers war worth rs a day.
Here doc" Riley rose and said:
"Bill, | left my gun at home, be-
cause / knowed how hard 1t was
for yer to get bail last time, and l
don't want ter discuss, but want
ter ask single question:"
"Go ahead"
"Was that ere miner-oWner a
tenderfoot or a practical manw
"Hy! by hy!" shouted score
OF voices.
Nov, see hyar, pards, "said the
preacher, "you kinder got me.
5ut 1t war my certain opinion that
he war practical miner, and had
been around the camp saving, saw
ing all he could, called mean, be-
cause he wouldn't jine the boys in
freeze out, working for $3.50 a
day in wet shaft and drinking
cheap red Ticker until he was
Altered his breath would pizen the
man at the windlass. / don't sup
pose he ever played game Of
keerds, except seven-up-which
puts me In mind how l got skim
ned at that ar game on the Arkin-
saw 1 hope none of this congre-
gation--but / have got off the
Trail. Mister Ito an Es stern MANI,
whar war / p
Eastern man: "You were speak
ing about paying the laborers of
the vineyard"
"Beg your pardin," said "Doc"
Riley, "Bill war speaking about
lodes vineyards warn't In ques-
ton. / asked him if that ar mine
owner war q tenderfoot or prac-
teal man. / and him don't agr rec.
No practical miner would put q
tenderfoot on a prospect. He'dts
a darned fool TO pay him 81 day.
That ar Is played.
"See hyar, Doc" said Poker
Bill, "another break like that and
there Wi be trouble In this taber-
nacle. want no discussion. You
all know had a--of q time rails
ing bail, and further i just want
this congregation to understand |
can calaboOse the whole burned
lot under Order No. 6, and"
Here the preacher was interrupt
ed by the sharp crack ola revolver.
Trouble followed. No words, no
furniture broken. No noise, ex-
cept score or two of sharp explo-
sions Luckily none of the wounds
were mortal.
When the provost guard took
obaroa pOlxar Rill fuhO was only