The New Orleans daily Democrat., 1880-04-15
CURRENT HUMOR.

The language of flowers s-Anthologlc fol
MY dear Jim.' Jas. mine.
Why Ia a Zulu belle like q prophet of old
Because she has not much On 'er In her owI
country.
Ada, aged 4, who was doing something, and
was told to desist by her mother; Mother
Eyes, ma. you may II you like"
A Boston paper thinks there ought to be q
law In this country to compel every girl who
is engaged to wear o red bow at her throat
| That wouldn't do bit of good. Every girl
would wear one.
| Leap-Ye Party-Mr. Gush: 30, what
Miss Cool with great demureness) Won't
you try turn, Mr.. Gush?" And vet Gush
didn't see it, and said: "Chawned, I'm sure. -
"You are an oius, hidjus. idjlt, my dear, y
said q playful mamma to her daughter, at
| dancing school, the other day. "Oh, my dear
Mrs. t." sighed one Of her neighbors, 'what
| wouldn't l give to have your knowledge OF
Latin"
On hearing there was to be a sale of old
prints belonging to the British museum, Mrs.
Smith hazarded the suggestion that. with
calico at Its present low figure. they wouldn't
pay for selling. "Why, an old print doesn't
even make good busters" added this excel
lent housewife.
How much are these goods yard?" said
gentleman In a dry goods store the other
day, as he picked up and examined a piece of
ruf1led silk. Good graciousl" cried the hor-
ritied clerk, "that isn't for sale! That's the
end Of a lady's train! She's just gone up to
the third story In the elevator"
worthy couple In Massachusetts, town
Rad lost their only daughter and were deeply
depressed. AS they sat one evening in the
the wife remarked: "weii, George, or res, there Is
one consolation. Situated as we are, we
could never have gotten Jane into Boston
society"
Poor Herbert, how wish you did not
have to slave SO from morning till nightr'
murmured his wife, as, with fond caress.
she seated herself on her husbands knee
and gently stroked the auburn locks from
his lofty brow. And the grave, stern man OF
business understood her at once, and said /:
"Well, Susie, what is it--a bonnet, or what?
Don't be too hard on me for money is scarcer
than ever"
A New Hampshire woman has a husband
who is addicted to joining secret societies.
One OF her exasperated outhurste is thus re-
ported by the Manchester Mirror: "Jinei
He'd jine anything. There can't nothing
but he'll jine it. II anybody should get up
society to burn his house down. he'd jtne 1t
just as soon as he could get In, and II he had
TO pay to get in he'd iine all the suddener."
The choice some people make of matrimo-
NAL partners is hard to understand. young
Maine iaI uaIIieua nlRnly-cultured BoS-
ton girl, who didn't know the first thing about
housekeeping, but had devoted her youth to
the study of geology and mineralogy, and
when he took her home, instead of attend
ing to household duties, she went roaming
about the farm and soon discovered on her
husbands land gold mine worth $40, 600
You can't always tell how match will turn
out.
A lady Of rank, proudly conscious OF her
dignity, one day dissenting ON the superior
ity of the nobility, remarked that the three
classes of the community-nobility, gentry
and commonalty-might very we'll be com
pared to the three materials, china, delf and
crockery. A few minutes elapsed, when one
of the company expressed desire to see the
lady's little girl, who was In the nursery.
John, the footman, was dispatched with or
ders to the nursery maid, to whom he called
out from the bottom of the stairs, In an audi
BILE voice: 'Hello. Crockery; bring little
China"