The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1880-12-11

iucao VI Whut you WISH IN return. W our
faces are beaming, your visages bright
so far so good. We think we have seen
one Of these in bric.a-brac collection.
1t was quite unique. Intellectual and your
cranial contents "all right" "of course"
We will not discuss that question, for "By
their fruits ye shall know them" We also
have quite variety Of visual organs to
select from, and as we are "color blind"
that is OF no consequence Girls, we are
sorry that Anna is suffering from an cpl
demic Of Grecian noses. Your olfactory
tiliments must be very acute. Emlgrate
here and you will not be troubled with
telephone cigars" And you ore not
"built for squeezing" We must say that
morphologically you have been sadly neg
lected. But still there is hope, Perhaps
Madame Foy could aid you. We can not
discuss this question very effectually on
paper; would embrace the opportunity"
to interchange views. We are not an ad.
mirer of the American construction of the
| external and internal maleolar processes.
The French suits our taste. We are glad
to learn that you construct your own
habiliments and are versed in the culinary
arts" We would suggest that you also be-
come an adept in the procedure Of irritat-
ing linen on corrugated surface
in common parlance known as "wash-
ing" Yc state you can WELD the "hat-lron."
These two accomplishments might be of
great service to you should you be unfor-
tunate enough to procure one OF our num-
bers. The idea Of welding women's
weapon strikes us very forciby. From
your statement you are we'll supplied with
aesthetical accomplishments.
So nice to be able to sing, "Theres no
place like home" while "drawing"-wa-
ter-or saving wood, and other light house
hold duties. In regard to your eyes, that
is sacred question with US, as it is beyond
the scope of human mind to form any
hypothesis in regard to 1t from apparently
conclusive data-nearer than "between
sweet seventeen and four score" So you
| have fondness for intelligent mcnl Most
people generally admire rare objects. "You
are enough for US all" well, perhaps, more
so.
We are afraid you will not have the op.
portunity of bending your will, unless you
send out another Poler expedition Then
perhaps, the object of your desires will be
found among the numerous curiosities
found. We are glad to learn that "the old
folks" are nice. Many thanks, girls, but
we have no desire to enter into d matri
monial alliance with the whole family
Wit won't procure bcefsteak more than
once or twice, unless the butchershops are
numerous and the propretors have . large
stock of faith in human nature.
"Now, in return for your good qualities, y
you wish not for wealth." Now, that OBJ.
viates the principal difficulty. II you are
content to subsist on the slender passion,
and that as a source of nutrition, we think
there is some hope for you. That is a
good summer diet, easily accumulated, and
a non-provokcr of dyspepsia.
But as for ourself, we would be afraid to
90 beyond the limit set by Dr. Tanner. In
regard to strong, honest men, with the
other divine qualities, you wish, we are
afraid, we cannot fill your order as the de-
mand Is far greater than the supply. They
are quoted very high, and this country is
several years behind in her orders. Now
in regard to the symetrical pedal extremi-
ties nearly ever variety is found among us.
But the parenthetical O, and Hogarth 5
lines Of beauty seem to predominate There
also seems to be a sad lack of adipose
tissue. You are right on the hair question,
color is no: soughtfor Length and tena c.
| ity are the main qualities that should in
tercst you. As you have no choice in
olfactory organs we will not comment
And you wish an organism endowed with
'large mouth, a cavern as it were. SO as
to be able to Swallow you whole" Now,
girls, we think that is carrying ausculatory
gymnastics too far. And we don't think
the nervous membrane of our digestive
organ would stand the procedure If this
gastronomic phenomena could be recip-
procated it would be "too awfully splen-
did" to swallow each other. How estheti-
cal, how romantic The idea of you
vending your way down our Oesophogus,
nearly tickles us to death. Too nice to be
wrapped up in each other as it were. What
a nice pastime to swallow you, and just
think what nice time you would have
combating the solvent action Of the gastric
juice.
So girls after mature delberation, we