The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1880-07-29
A HumOrist Catches q Shark.

Burdette, the Burlington HaaUkeye
humorist, tells how he caught shark
off Nantucket.
II is fun. A delightful sail of nine
miles brought us to the fishing grounds.
We anchored off Great Point and de-
stroyed lunch big enough for militia
company. This was one of the pleasant
est numbers in the programme and
would have been encored had there
been. anything LETT. Then we caught
sharks.
There is a great iron hook, with two
feet of chain fastened to it, and the rest
wood stump. You load the hook with
bluefish, then let it sink to the bottom,
and wait in tranquility and patience for
bite. The shark takes hold of bait
in a mean, sneaking, grudging way, as
though he didn't care much about it
and believed you were q liar anyhow
and only took it because he thought he
was stealing it. He has to roll o yer be-
roie ne can take uLe DalJ aJ all, ana as
he knocks it with his nose in this move
ment, you are notified that your first
shark is following your hook, and if
you are like me, you want to "holler"
right away. By-and-bye there is a gen.
tie tug at the hook. very easy and very
SlOW, anu Jou DCSlu W WOuutE ii SOlue
Mississippi catfish hasn't lost himself
down here. Then the shark starts away
with the bait, you let him run a yard or
so, give him little slack, and with one
mighty jerk fasten the hook in him. and
haul in.
That is where the entertainment be-
gins. The curtain is rung up with
flourish OF trumpets, three ruffles of the
drums, red fire from both wings, and
thunder and lightning in the distance.
II you ever lived on a farm and led re-
luctant COW to turn when she wanted to
go into the woods on both sides of the
road and climb trees. you know about
what it is to haul in a shark. You yell
at the time. Must yell, from the time
the hook catches until the shark is in !;
or you'll never get him. And he rest
of the crew help you. They shout en-
couraging remarks at you. Hand over
hand you tug in the line. Inch by inch
the shark takes it out. You rally, and
brace your feet against the gunwale,
and in ne comes again. You think you
must have about five hundred fathoms
of line out. You begin to wish you
were windlass. You puff, and yell,
and pant, and howl, and strain, and
shout, and pull, and shrek, and sweat,
and wall, and surge, and haul, and yank,
and all the time that provoking shark is
just holding back with the steady. un-
swerving, aggravating reluctance of a
July hillside, and over and through
your own inarticulate shoutings you
can hear the rest of the crew.
Lift him up judge, lift him right
out of the wateri"
Hang onto him, Hawkeye, raise him,
raise himn
Puff louder, colonel, and you'll
fesch himm
Robbie" chimed in her little serene
highness from her lofty seat, "don't step
on your eyes"
And indeed, my organs of vision were
standing out, and looking at each other,
in great amazement over the top of my
nose, having never seen each before, and
being great surprised to find they were
twins.
But pretty soon, just as you have
made up your mind that you can't pull
another pound, the great ugly body ol
the shark, looms up in sight, then you
see the CLASSY eyes and the smiling
ing and shouting is redoubled. Captain
William catches the chain and thu
sharks head is held above the water
while Captain Alexander with a huge
South Sea war club pounds the shark or
the nose. One or two thumps with that
mighty club is sufficient, for the shark
is vitality sensitive about his nose, anC
we had the monster on board. 1t is my
first shark, and it is nine feet long anc
will weigh about 400 pounds.
That is several feet taller than am.
In the calm majesty Of success / tilt
my hat forward and little to port, un
til it rests easily on one ear and the til
OF my nose. Then l look haughtily ou
over the dancing waters of the blue At
lantic, and wait for another shark
while l graciously receive the sarcasti,
congratulations and praises of the ad
miring crew.