The Osceola times., 1880-06-26
WAYS or THE WORLD.

Hon Ime-That kept by tower clocks.
Tus common law keep off the
grass
LanoS .ApB Is better than spiritual aid
- leverage.
TuE Elmira Adrerfiser advises young
men to go wcs, and blow up with the
country.
No, Mary Ann; . newspaper dress is
not made OF prints, however suggestive.
Bloomington Eye.
w. SnARcY, OF Hampton, s. C.. in
clearing eight acres of an old field one
day last week, killed fifty snakes.
Don General Outlook command the
grand army OF trAmpS?-llariiord Jour
nal. No, General Nuisance does.
Two twin brothers are said to be so
much alike that they frequently borrow
money from each other without know
ing it
Auruors are spoken Of as dwelling in
attics because SO few OF them are able to
live on their first story.-Bosioa Jogrna!
If Commerce.
TnERB is vigorous inquiry in Boston
Just now to ascertain now many of the
pelice force were good little boys and
attended SurdEy-school.
NATHAN SrowELL, the originator OF
the famous evergreen sussr-corn, il still
living in Burlington, n. j., and is 40
tive, despite his ei2hty-sevsn years.
ANxw YoRK coachmsn has been fined
and imprisoned for rum, ng over . wo-
man. No, the millennium is not here
che was The wife OF q banker.
KySrusKr girls average l26 pounds
Boston Post. A very comfortable lap
full.-New Haven REGISTER. See here,
young fellow. the thermometer is fooling
around the Sos.
YOUNG men who never did a days
work in their lives now effect wooden
shirts, bask in the sun 10 get on a heal
thy brown and wear the general appear
ance Of stevedores.
CAELYsLR is said TO be rapidly failing,
He cannot now holu cup without spill.
ing its contents. He is resigned at the
prospect of death, fearing to survive his
intellectual faculties.
CONNECTICUT prayer-meeting do not
furnish much variety. The first one
called upon to prae never takes
less than an hour and q half, and the
people slip out as the next one be-
gina
FoErY-six members of the Ohio Legis-
lsture could not repeat over six of the
ten commandments, but when it came
down to stealing stationary from the
State, they just made things hum.
THs chap who grumbles so loudly
when his wife asks hun to put UP
the clsthes-line is generally the first ono
to rush upon the stage and be half an
hour tying female medium in cabi-
net.
CAPT. HowaArB says that even the
steamer Great Eastern could not tow an
average iceberg a mile in all day. If any
steamer wants to try 1t we are will
ing she should take two days or oven
week.
A BosroS paper calls Harriet Beecher
Stoves old man q professor. Professor
OF whatf He can make root beer, and has
invented . double-bsrreled wheelbar-
row. but that only entities him to the
handle of Judge"
NEVADA papers calmly tell of beulders
weighing seven tons flying through the
air ike feathers AS tornado gots in its
work. II is rather curious that Ne
vsda liars weighing less than two hum
dred pounds, are never moved off their
feet.
the new Minister to Belgium, Jaraes
j. Putnam, Of Buffalo, 10 a graduate OF
Yale, ~, and served as New York State
Senator from 1854 to 1855, and has
the reputation of being writer
and speaker OF great eloquencc and
force.
WILLIAM LYNN, of Rochester, by viii
bequcdihed $4,000 TO the American
Tract S cietv, and o like sum to tn,
Presbyterian Board OF NJ ssions
The residue OF tss estate, valued a
about 100000, 10 bequesthed TO /.
nephew.
The Boston P1s thinks that the stste-
ment that seven different United STATE!
Senators started in life as railroac
brat eman was invented by some on,
TO make men satisfied with bein.
smashed between the bumpers at SAD pei
month.
AIADY lawyer down East always ad
dresses her husband at breakfast ri
'Ny learned brother at lunch sh,
calls Inn "the counsel Tor the defense;'
at dinner time she calls him - bras.
mounted pettfogger with a cheek lik
an army mule"
IT is stated that in 1879 twelve person
in the United States and Europe gave al
aggregate Of $4,000 900 to the cause o
foreign missions. Yet without this out
lay, there arc still many heather un
supplied with chromos and illuminate,
pocket handkerchief.
Printed Paper.