The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1880-03-06
MRS. SMITHS PEDLER.s TRAP.

hRso. fEDlsEEo IhAP.
Christmas wa. = day of rejoicing in the Smith
family. The good lady Of the house had just sue
cccl., IN Icricctlng an invention which is ul,i-
maicly destined tO rcvoutonizc the great branches
of industry known by the term "iiinorant." md 10
@cptiyc h"-is oi men Of lucrative cmpioyment.-
The lniniciic oG the Smith. j. lpcatcl IN Mission
street. ju.; irtwccn w"ulwafis GRriens and the
"ity front. II 'ay he rtr,sLisct by the front yarl
ant ia" Very lecgiiaF canvas apparatus which b.
aitacie'l to tie fence. Tais piece OF canvas
.ttoich,- from the top "f the fence {, pair oi
pole, lua'y fastened 10 the ,idcwalk lelow. and
ioIiAs an inclined pane. reaching nearly I, the
iOuni which bear. "a close resemblance tp tie net
ting u.sl IN g!ulra.uins ami ciTcuses q. safe
receptacle t"r lnl!ing acftha;s. Ihi. canvas ar
rangemcut j. only portion Of the great invention
ALLUDED To-: the principal part of which is located
beneath the lputstcr IUr ssseTHl year, past Mrs.
S;ath. ia common with Arr sister housewife.
throughout the city. ha' been hafassed by the
visits Of l'.icrs. scWin: machine agents. medical
caui a.scrs c.ciabc v,ndsr, trat cling tin smiths.
insurance solicitor. and ho.i of the other gen
Try Who annoy anl rcnic. miserable the female
population pt the city. Mr.. Smith. less fortunate
tLlu many Lpa.rwiy-.. !. without n servant and
ha. hithcrt" been compelled tp make all the way
frri" 80" o. i"n trip ia! o. the iron; door.
In far' tho bcll ran:. tnkiel. Luffcl AMI ratified
sln".t continually, Rul ." great va. the strain
upon the i.n,.nnabu!a,iu: arraratu. ;ha, new
wire ha, 10 lie Iui ia tw" or three times q month.
and even the knob wore out quarterly. Thi. state
Of affair. was not only expensive and tr"uLicspinc
but il was gradually reducing Mrs. Smith TO a
skeleton. and shc daily waXeI weaser and more
at,cnuatcd. She calculated. and calculated very
city tha; she Travelled from Elk eight miles
day in her tramis to the door 81 last Mgs. Smith,
Inspired by dcsi Grafton. hit upon the plan which
/ ha. since prove 80 effective. skilliu machinst
was Immediately employed and directed 90
s;ruct beneath the front doorstep compac; and
powerful apparatus connected with spring on the
inside of the threshold which, when prcSsod by the
light foot Of Mrs. smith. would suddenly bring
into play the great forces Of the hidden machinery
and press the doOrsieps upward with such terrific
velocity that its unfortunate oecupan; would be
hurled into space. The flying pcdler was suppOs-
ei after being prccipiiatei from the doorstep. to
describe graceful parabola which would have it,
termination in the depth. Of the canvas. The re.
ceptac!c being an inclined plane. was expected 10
gently drop the Involuntary acrobat 10 the side
walk below. NJ last the ingenious apparatus was
completed and the mechanic assuredthe inveniTess
that her idea would make the young peiler shoot.
thus unconsciou,y in,oriin. an old expression.
lie also expressed his confidence that the afore-
said canvas would invariably be the place g; de-
sccut. an the day before Christmas Mrs. Smith
placed q chair ncas the door and serency awaited
ihc Jingle which woull indicate the approach o:
Of her first victim. She had not long 60 watt
Before ten minute. hal expired the bell gave
prcmunitoTy tinkle. Opening the door Mrs. Smith
smiled On the out.iier with more complaisancc
than ,hc had maniEsei for wears bel re. She did
not forget however. TO place her foot in convenicn;
proximity in the little spring before mentioned.
Madam" inscnucusly asked the unconscious
| intruder. may | soil you sewius--
| lie Wa. however. called away 50 suddenly that
| he hal ne time TO complete his question. for Mrs.
Smith pressed the spring. the 'iep had flashed up
ward. and 10 the poor sewing machine man had
| disappeared. Alas for human ingenuity. however.
he r.appearci at the wrons place. and instead Of
/ falliag into the canvas kindly prepared Tor
! his convenience. struck against the fence with
/ great violence. just after completing his third
| soincrsauli. The neghbors thought that an un-
| fortunate wroaaut had been pitched from balloon.
aud fOckci To the spot in scores. The poor fell
! low had leg fracture. and the doctor across the
street added another e. his list Of patients. The
machine was Immediately perfected. and by Christ
mas morning operated with beautiful accuracy
During the morning Mr. smith Advocated the re-
moyal OF the canvas on the ground that intruders
deserved TO suffer. In the wee sina hOurs of yes
! tcriay morning. however he reached his house in
n condition oi semi incbrie,y which made his foot
| stops uncertain. and while entering the door he
| VA incautious enough to place his right foot on
the little spring before he removed his lett foot
/ from the doorstep. The result was rapid "rial
/ fight. fall into the canvas, slide on the side
walk aud walk back TO the door. This little in
| cidcnt removed the objection. which Mr.. smith
| had formerly o. tho canvas, anil yesterday he
watched fifty sixty pcllcrs aud cant assers prac
ticc muscular coniortion during their flights from
the step 10 the canyas without feeling the slight
| ct regret that they were uninjnred. II will DO
proper in conclusion 10 inform the public that Mrs.
| smith has reserved the patent right of her
derful inysntion.-SaH FraH~i.eo Chronicle.
| s-
PESxsYLvAxiAs FrRsr GoyrHxoR's IIo~E.-
Near the quiet, old time village OF iChathan stands
u venerable stone mansion house. all that Is leit
Of what was n valuable estate. IL is supposed
10 have been bniit ey Miiham Mehean aoout the
year l,ao' and Is. no DOUBT the mouse IN wn,eh
nov: Thomas Mexican was porn 70 lhv year I.s''
Mexican was one oi ths sisheTs OF our nosla'nuoh .
OF independence tue hr,t governor "' 'hs s.a'e
OF fcnnsylNania' from l''! 70 iSoS' ana ai'sr-
"afd d'h'ci-!ashes' me oiu h"uss "As o"''' " 'uI
tavern anu was usei n 'ush i"' man. years
aud was called thc Halfway house u athrec-
story stone building win ROOF pfgeeu"h'' o,
point caves covering ,he ~'huS"s ~ .,aes % anu
esds' NJ one corner OF tue wan near 'he man
outer door y projecting stone win usep ho.sn
or sNt cut IN a. over wh,eh 'ra'srsr' .nre~ .ne