The Magnolia gazette. [volume] (Magnolia, Miss.) 1872-current, 1880-06-11
PASSING SMILES.
A Low story. the basement.

DEAD issues old newspapers
The home stretch - putting up
clothes line.
AUTHORS are spoken Of as dwelling in
attics, because so few OF them are able
to live on their first story
LIFE on tho Plains" book lust
out. won't be mucl Of a success Only
six Indians killed in The first chapter.
In reading the personals and depar
lures in the newspapers one Discovers
that distinguished visitors, like loose
powder, go of with puff
WHEN a Georgina man gets too weak
to split watermelon open with an NIX,
his relatives begin To look around and
see what's the best they can do on head
stone.
What" says an inquisitive young
lady, lis the most popular color for
bride" We may be a little particular
in such matters, but we should prefer
white one,
IF Bismarck insists on his resignation,
the Emperor William knows our address.
Up two flights Of stairs, and knock nj
the right-hand door. Don't kick the
panels. Burdette
VERY red-haired passenger-"I say,
guard. Why on earth don't your train
go on?' Guard" Good gracious, sir
put your head in; how can you expect
to go on while the danger signal is out?'
KNOW victim to tobacco" said
lecturer, "who hasn't tasted food for
thirty years." GLOW do you know he
hasn't2" asked an auditor. aBecauss
tobacco killed him in 1850" was the
reply
OVER five gallons Of castor oil have
been Nsed in oiling the skates of the
Hartford rink. We are thankful that
new line of industry has opened to the
dreadful Donbatg News,
He" Why, you see, the fact is, my
dear, | knocked your medieval teapot
off the top shelf and broke" She
"Oh, my prophetic soul My teapotT
He (bitterly)-"No, Merely my headl'
"SEE, mammal exclaimed little
one, as puss, with arching spine and ele-
waited rudder, Btrutted around the table.
See, kitty's eat 80 much she can't shut
her tail down"
HEAVY swell-(to customer Of the
house)-'1 think have seen you before;
your face seems very familiar to mep
Very likely, sir, was long
sheriff's officer. (Gent collapses.
A GERMAN traveller in Africa charac.
terizes people he came across az q N.
tensely black, dolichocephalic and
p'atyrhine, prognathus, dichotomatic
and dolichodactylic.r We have seen
man knocked down for less than that.
A YOUNG man who plunged into tbe
water and rescued maiden who had
sunk TO the river bottom was rewarded
by her hand. She couldn't doubt his
affectionj she knew he was ready TO dive
for her.
EMERsoN says everything good in
man leans on something higher. Emer.
son is right. We have seen a man lean
on telegraph pole, and the only good
in him was beer. At least he said II
was good.
Said she with hateful snap;
They're some saved on purpose
70 put IN the baby'e pap.n
Wei, sld John, edgiug for tho door,
What makes you 20 cross about IT, thenf
Ain't the baby's pap7"
FANCY Farmer" asks: GLOW do Won
keep weedm out OF your garden?j RIess
your soul, we don'tl We tried having
hand-organ play "Pinafore" to them
but as they still kept on growing. We
concluded that it was best to 20 fishing
and let them grow.
WHEr the intellectual typo isn't careful,
ofthe poets voluntary clever rhyme, Ssla"'
lr1f Clever rhyfne
He ia pretty sure to set them up most fearful
Most fearful
FOraPrintsr'' work is isoccgPied By time,
Pied BY time.
A MAN out West obtained divorc.
from his wife, and married again within
three days after the decree was granted.
irlsman commenting on the mans
action, remarked; Bedad, he couldn't
have had much respect for his first wife,
to be marryin again so soon after LAWN
her"
He was little lawyer man.
Who meekly blushed while he began
HeF poor dead husbands will 70 scan
Be miled while thinking Of his r.
Then said 10 her, so'tepderiy,
b You have nice fat legaoyn
And when be lay next tay IA he'd
With plastors on his broken head
ne wondered what on earth he'd said.
COLONEL INGERsoLL says he doesn't
see how ii is possible for man 10 die
worth $4,000, 900 or SIC, 900, 900 in a. CITY y
full of want" Nor do we. Editors
should club together and resolve not to
die worth &5,000,000 or $4,000, 900.
We would rather not die at ali than to
leave this world worth that much money.
--NoTristolon Herald.
Can ANY One TelIl
Can any one tell why young men who
are always behindhand with their cred