The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1880-12-09
Pungleup's Test.

Woman is by nature SO cratic and
inconsistent a creation that it doesn't do
to bet on even her most marked charac.
teristics. For illustration, the other
day old Mr.. Pungleup, OF Mob Hill, was
commenting on the railroad velocity
with which young ladies jabbcr to each
other when they meet, without either in
the least understanding or replying to
what the other says.
"It's just n mean falsehood gotten up
by you Rood-for-n nothing men," said the
youngest Pungleup girl, Indignantly.
"All right" said her father, be-
nigna' tly; well try an experiment.
see your friend, Miss Cluckersor, com.
ing up the street. Now, IL wager that
new walking suit you want so much
tlilt you can't say roast turkey and
cranberry sauce in response TO the first
without her noticing the fact"
81 never heard anything so perfectly
absurd" replied Miss p. "However,
mi sht as well have that suit--it's just
too lovcy for anything-so III just do
it 10 teach you lesson"
Mind, now said her father, as the
front door bell rang, You mustn't
charge your expression i'll the least, and
you must repeat the sentence in your
usual voice and manner-that Is 10 say,
in n single breath-all lun together as it
we're"
Just then Miss Giuckerson was shown
into the parlor, and through the library
door old z. could hear the usual oscu-
latory peck exchanged, and Miss G, eX-
claim, without even the smallest comma
in the whole remark:
"Oh,' you lazy thing been here a per-
feet age don't look at this hat perfect
fright going to have flowers set back
and bow changed why wasn't you ut
matinee Harry was there"
"Roast turkey and cranberry sauce"
rapidly inserted Miss p, accompanying z
the words with that preliminary and
concluding gurgie with which al
women, for some occult reason, inVarjG-
bly, adorn their conversation when de-
sirous of being agreeable.
"Going to Mrs. Badgers partya'
continued Miss Ginckerson, with the
serene rattle Of brook over the peb.
bles. "Molly Smith is going they tell
me she paints pas promis ed Inc a
phaeton in the spring saw that hateful
Mrs. Guppery on the street buff over
skirt and green ruching just fancy"
"Roast turkey aud cranberry"
NIs SOOiSO hiOllICl
dead bury her next Sunday did you get
that ecging at Gimps'P"
"Roast turkey and Gran"
"The girls at Clark's are to graduate
next Thursday Jennie Giggles is going
to be square cut with inside illusion and
white kid boots can't you come round
for dinner tomorrow and stay all"
"Roast turkey and"
"Night, and show Milly your new
basqueP That man with a light over
coat stared at me again yesterday Jim
O'Neill is going East this candy's fright
tul stale"
"Roast turkey"
INA thinks Mrs. Brown amt proper,
those ferns are just too lovely look at
these cuffs clean this morning are my
'imps coming out yours amt Little
Skippen says you met Charlie Boggs the
other nigh. and he said something nice
about me tell me quick!"
'Roast turk"
"Why how perfectly absurd you are,
Linda" interrupted the visitor, angrily,
You don't listen to a word / say
was asking about Charles Boggs not
roast turkey George Shelly thinks you're
awfuI nice now tell me what did ne say
good gracious! what are you hugging
me forP"
"And, Tilda," "thoughtfully remarked
Miss Pungleup, after the matter had