davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-11-23

which, ifnot called for IN thirty days, will
be sent to Washington, ID. ..
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Editorial Etohings.
FROM THE NoREIsrowN HERALD.

FROM THE NURl;lSToWN HERALD.
The Boston Iraaecrja observes: "The
bean-bower has come" In other words,
a Boston lecturer has returned home. En-
close stamp ior diagram.
\ poet carols: "On, come into the garden,
sweet, at dawn OF day, at dawn Of day
If sweet comes, we advise her to wear
her brothers rubber boots, for she will
have a sweet time wading in the mud.
q" At dawn OF day is too contounded early
Tor such nonsense, anyhow.
y couple Of English sportsmen have ar
rived in New York to shoot buhalo.-Er.
They will be greatly surprised, too, when
they learn that they will have to leave
New York before thcy can shoot buffalo.
An Englishman sitting on the corner OF
Thirteenth street and Fifth avenue, with a
rifle under his arm, waiting for herd o;
buffalo 70 come along, would be mistaken
for g2m puzzle victim looking for the in
Yor.
At a public sale Of old books i'll New
York the other day, a man paid five hun.
drcd and fifiy.fiye dollars for twenty page
almanac one hundred and ninety -four years
Old. Persons who have lost their reason
should not be permitted to attend auctions
The weather in an almanac born in 1856 is
no mere reliable than that Nenner has
! given US the past few months, and the
! eclipse are not worth two cents on the
! dollar. Bat perhaps the purchaser is a
circus clown, and bought the almanac for
| the sake OF its new Jokes.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
WHOLE NO. 1903:
ChoWder.
FROM YONKERs STATESMAN.

a stem winder: The ivy vine Ioakers
SlateSm1t. wind stemmer The winter
ustsr.-IlaeLe5ssack Republican.
Taken altogether the beauties of art and
nature do not begin to interest the inquisi-
two female so much as the view she gets
through keyhole.-FaLgon Times.
If Nsnner has any more snow storms
back, and thinks they will not keep over
summer, he had better let them come now,
before the fragile youth has passed his
ulster to his uncle for storage. MtddIet9,9n
Transcript.
A Constant Reader" writes to know
what IS the origin OF the Easter egg Well,
without giving the matter any very deep
consideration, We would say that it is the
heR-but then he may be mistaken.-BaL
tHsorc Ecery Slhr laL
Chicago has policeman who can speak
the English, German, French, Polish and
Welsh languages. lie can club man in
hve different languages in less time than it
takes an ordinary policeman to make a
common arrest in hog Latin.-Lonc Se1ti-
mel.
\ reward having been offered for a
rhyme to Arkansaw, tho Arkansas Trarelr
set his machine to work and ground out
the following:
There is q Gut here in Arkau>aw
Who can saw as much as his can saw;
But give him an AK,
and with one or two whacks
lie u ChpP M la~rc hogs than his pa can saw,
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

one of the happiest men that ever walked
Gods beautiful earth. 1t is a grand thing
to live, Nera. Oh, l enjoy life. l can see
neither the sorrow nor the care people tell
of. God has blessed me in everything. |
should never have bsen called Ishmael
"And yet you have had trials. Have
been always poor; have had to toll for edu.
cation, and"
"Do you call these trials, Nora do not,
Oh, my darling, you are tho crowning bless,
ing. l thank nay God for his last great
gift"
He was novel wooer, but he was just the
man Nora needed to guide Alright her noble
but undisciplined nature.
Elsie said,
Darling Nora, am glad you are to be
happy like me-"
And Ned said;
What marry a common farmer! A
poor man! Nora, am ashamed of you r
But Nora, with her hand in Ishmael's
could defy dozen Neds, and she did not
heed his banter, though he WAS merciless
A year later Nora went to the farm a.
Ishmael's wife. All the long Winter even
ings they studied together, to the evident
annoyance of Aunt Mary, who predicted
blindness and early gray hairs.
Ishmael did master Schiller and Klep
stock, and to-day is a United States Senator
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
History Of One of the Jubilee Singers
BY MRS. J. L. NJ. BRIsToR.

The children who were set free by the
abolition OF slavery in the United States.
occupy position in which no other genera.
ton, OF any color, or in any land, were ever
placed before. Behind them are all tho
disabilities and crueltes Of that bondage in
which their lives began. Before them are
all the possibilities OF culture, distinction
and usefulness, that are open to the citizens
OF one OF the foremost nations of the earth.
Ihls fact adds a peculiar interest to the
histories OF the jubilee singers" So saws
Mr.. Marsh in the fifty ninth thousandth of
that little book 1.-The Story of the Jubilee
Singers, with their Songs printed and
sold to carry on the good work of Christian
education. Let us look at single history,
that of Ella Sheppard, whose slave father
hired his own time, and by keepin. a stable
bought his own freedom for 81 500. His
wife was owned by family in Missiisippi.
and for his own baby, Ella, he paid $3.50,
tho child being so i'll it was not expected to
live. He tried to buy his own wife, but
her master would not sell her, and thew
were separated entirely. Sheppard married
again; such being the usage in slave times.
He paid 81 800 for his second wife's free.
dom. Without going to a free State free
papers could not be executed. Before he
COULD leave for this purpose he became en-
barassed in BUSINESS. As he had bought
his wife and paid for her she was then
legally his property, and as liable to be
seized and sold for his debts as his horses
were. Learning that she was about thu,
to be seized he took hcr one night to the
woods and put her on board n nlidnigllt
train foI CINCINNATI. Soon after he follow.
Cd her with his child, leaving all the res,
OF his property to his creditors and began
llie anew without cent. Dying when Ella
was fifteen, Of Cholera, all lis property, oI
which he had accumulated caod deal
went to pay the costs Of unjust law suits
| Ella tool; lessons in secret, entering the
house OF an eminent teacher hy the bach
way, at nine and ten o'clock at night
After many struggles slit went to Fi,l
! University, and afterwards drilled iii,
jubilee singers, being their pianist in al
their travels. Do not these records max,
US blush with shame before The nations o
earth yet these things once were, an,
were accepted by great, free, and eHiight
encd people. Shall we not one day hid
our heads 1T the rscord of that create
demon, rum? which, in its dire;ul e.icc:
and ruin stalks in our land? LGol, at it
victims its foul, demoraii2ing infiupnc,
and tell me if the moral sense of commu
nlty that daily readg the columns Of j.
crimes anG misclics, is not strangely dead
insensihle, poisoned, g.tn2rensd, may sa
to allow such aM infamy, aye to license it
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Editorial Notes.
FROM THE NEW YORK COMMERCIAL

FROM THE NEW YORK COMMERCIAL.
4 hard thing to beat; A boarding house
carpet.
Any burned fool can make pun, but it
takes wise man to rise and explain one.
There is a maid of all work in the house
adjoining ours who is an upper,attic singer.
Any one who desires to adopt her and send
her to Italy or France will have our CRATE
ful acknowledgements.
1t is seldom that matrimonial alliances
are entered upon where the business inter
ests OF the contracting parties mutually
beneficial, that we must call attention to
the case of couple in Nebraska who com.
bine business with affection in a most pleas
ing and profitable manner. The wife is a
lady doctor, while the husband attends to
the undertaking department.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
WHAT SHALL BE DONE WITH
HIM2
BY MARY D. BRINE.

What shall he done with the mischievous hands,
That are never idle the whole day through?
What with the fat little fingers ten
What, oh what shall l do?
Into mischief from morn till night.
Loving the wrong and scorning the right
Such wee, meddlesome hands! All me
What can the remedy be?
What shall do with the troublesome feet,
That all day long into mischief stay
Little white feet, that restless spurn
Mothers commands each day?
Running away, how here, now there,
Giving mamma such trouble and care
Such wee, wandering feet? All mel
What must the remedy be?
What shall l do with the little king
Who rules the household? The wee, wee boy,
The mschisVous, naughty and precious elf,
Half nuisance, yet wholly joy.
Love him, till love with new delight
Shall lead the wandering feet Alright,
And teach the meddleSome hands the way
To be useful and good all day.
All! how lonely this earth would be
If it held no babies, my boy, like thee;
If no little feet ran hither and thither,
Leading our hearts. we know not whittier;
If no little fingers. on mischief bent,
Into our homes, alas were sent;
If, i'll fact, there were babies nOne
The Joy of living indeed were gone.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Facts and Faneies.
FROM THE BOSTON TRANSCRIPT.


Madam never bang door, if you do
adore a bang.
"Grammar don't amount to nothing no.
way" said the man with the greassy vest; ];
and we see no reason to doubt his sincerity.
The Phonograph was not q success. 1t
talked. What this country wants is list
eniRg machine. 1t has too many takers
without invoking the aid of insensate ma
chinery.
After the jury had been out nearly all
day, the Judge very properly sent them
word, saying, Mr.. Foreman it is true
gave you the case, but didn't intend you
to keep it forever. If it is all the same to
you, you will return it when you get
through with it"
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
A Human Trait.

Burdette, the Burlington Havkeye hunor-
list, while OH a recent lecturing tour, spent
an idle hour in the woods at Bloomville,
Ohio. There were only three idle Great
ures in the woods, he says. | was the big
gest, the oldest, and the idlest of the three.
A club Of a boy, about six or seven years
old, was the next, and black and tan dog,
that had treed a squirrel, was the next.
was so pleased with the boys idle compan-
iohship that paid him a quarter for it,
and advised him to stick to it, and never
work until he had to, and then, feeling the
same community of sentiment for the dog,
l went and helped him bark at the squir-
rol.
The tree was about two hundred feet
high. The dog would probably stand
about thirteen inches from the floor. He
tried to climb that tree. He barked as
though his throat was all the rams horns
of Jericho. He was after that squirrel
which was just as far out Of his reach as the
clouds. And the squirrel was not paying
any attention to the dog, and, indeed
didn't know what he was barking at.
am not positive that it had not gone of
into another tree an hour ago, and was
away off in another part of the woods
down near the county line. So patted
the dogs head as l came away, and said tc
| him:
Carlo, keep it up. 1t seems to do you
heap of good, and doesn't bother the squir
rel particle, So keep it up. You car
never climb the tree you will never catch
the squirrels when he wants to come dowT
he will come down another way, and yor
will not see hiHa. He will live just as lonl
and be just as happy with your noise a
without it. 1t occupies your mind and i
doesn't distract his. And it shows a yer,
human trait in you, Carlo. have know
men just like you; men who spent thei
lives in doing just what you are doing
barking at the people who were out o
their reach. Keep it up, Carlo, good dog
HEAVY DAMAGES. Tho Massach asetts court
have ordered the payment of probabl
the largest price ever given for human
leg, except perhaps where it was lost ol
the field of battle and the owner teok tn
question into politics A Chicago travelin
salesman was so injured by railroad acc
dent that his leg was amputated, and j.
obtained judgement against the CSmpan
for $4,000. The Company naturally az
pealed, and thssscond verdict was for S26
900; another appeal resulted in the ne'
verdict, which is fer $45,000 And still th
4 Company is not satisfied. A motion is
} he made to set aside the damages ON tn
B ground that they are excessive, and there
! 4 possibility that the court may Sc dsoia,
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Puckerings.
FROM PUCK.

Equine Eggery: A mares nest.
The much. moved Utes must begin to
feel like block in Is puzzle.
1t is said, but we have some difficulty in
crediting so horrible a runor, that the
Nihilists have sent disguised emssary to
tempt the Car to learn to ride bicycle.
(which" asked Smith OF. Brown, 81 is the
heavier, whiskey or water?
Whiskey, of course" replied Brown.
"Then," said Smith, 3" l can understand
why you always insist that l shall take the
first drink out of bottle, and you shall
have the last"
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Skin Grating.
HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL OPERATION BY A VII
MINGT0N PHYSICIAN.

About three months ago, Mr.. Gerson L.
Kahn, of this city, sustained a severe burn
on his thigh, which left sore and nasty
scar. As means of reducing the extent
OF this scar and assisting the burn to com
Pletely heal, DR.. George L. Maxwell resorted
to the operation known as n-grafting
He took from his own arm several small
pieces of skin, laid them carefully upon the
burned surface oi ~. :, Us thigh and let
nature do the rest. From tlme to time he
called on his patient and found the opera
ton working beautifully, the skin taking a
good hold and spreading nicely in all direc-
tiops. Yesterday Mr. Kahn came to VIII.
mington, after brief sojourn in Philadel-
phia, and DR.. Maxwell, on calling upon
him, found that the grating process had
been complete success, the skin having
grown almost entirely over the burn.
Several years ago DR.. Maxwell performed
this operation on Middletown negro, who
had been shot in the cheek, the wound
leaving a nasty, distiguriug scar. The
doctor took skin from his own arm and
from the arm Of his patient, and applied il
to the wound. 1t spread beautifully, and
| in short time the scar was entirely cover
ed by a growth of skin. For awhile the
white pieces of skin used in the graftins
process showed forth distinctly, and for
! time it was uncertain whether the patien
| would become q white man or remain
spotted negro. Finally the veins began t.
traverse the patches of white skin, and sooE
they became as the rest of the mans face
thus proving that the neSro's dark color i
due to his blood and not to the natura
condition of his skin. Dr. Maxwell reper
| ted this case in detail to leading medica
journal, from which it found its way int,
the newspapers, and was widely published
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Worldly Waits,

FROM THE KEOKUK GATE CITY.
1t is the infant-tree that shoots, remarks
the Whitehall Times. But it is the musket.
tree the shooting is done with, we believe.
When a newspaper prints wood-cut
showing the shape Of some distinguished
mans head, it is impossible to tell at dis.
tanoe whether it is a portrait of a sugar
cured, ham or the advertisemnt of a new
brand of liver pad.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Sanetum-0nious Levity.
FROM THE WHITEHALL TIMES.
Fools of the world, with many dollars,

Fools of the world, with many dollars,
OutShine all poor but brilliant scholars.
Few men ever know what pity is until
they need the article.
Singular as it may seem, in warmest
houses it is scold all the time.
Kisaing by telephone is about as satisfac.
tory as scratching your head with sun.
beam.
Letters of introduction are not always
successful to get man into geod society,
no more than eloquent obituaries are to get
a man into heaven.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
Saturday Night Twinklings.

FRoMTHE cINC1sNAT1 SATURDAY NIGnT.
Fine arts: The Police Judges.
In peace prepare for war, particularly
where it is single piece of pie and two
hungry boys.
1t was when the old man called for pie
at dinner that Mrs. Micawber said sh@
weuld never desert her Micawber.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21
The Pastor and the Wasps.

DR.. Thorn was pastor by himself lie
was thin as a lath, lanll as June shad,
and solemn as a tombstone. He had no
gestures, and seldom lifted his eyes from
his book. If screwed to the floor he could
not have been more immovable lie
labored daily like Il tlitcher, and got his
living mainly from lis farm. When he
took his charge, his senior deacon struck
the keynote when he said: "Thp Lord
keep you humble, and we will keep you
poor" The minister kept his farm, and
his farm kept him. He went from the
hay field 20 q funeral, and was back again
before the hearS2 started. lie called his
clerical garments "regimcntals." and kept
them hung in the garrpt. His "breeches"
were wash.loathcr, dyed black, lasting
through a generation. Into these endur-
ing and never-yel,iing habiiments the old
dominic was shook at the very beginning,
and they never stretched; so much room
and no more. One Sunday morning Mr..
Thorn went into the garnet to array himself.
| The bell tolled from the old tower, and the
parson had no time to spare Mercy what
Il sight A colony of wasls in the old man S
! breeches The farmer preacher bad had a
contest now and then with this insect. lie
| knew how savage and now venOmous a
| colony OF waSps was. The bell was sl0%
ing, nearing the end, and something must
be done. A long stick and an adroit
manipulation elected the intruders-ex
cept two vaSrantS who wrr" on foragina
expedition in the seams. The pastor en-
tered the church on the last stroke Of the bel
and the sermon was reached without disaster
Then trouble began as the wasps intiniatec
that they were crowded. The staid and stiff
dominic became agile. Heclasped his hand
on his side, leaped from the floor, skipped
from side to 81 le, and gave other signs of hi
annoyance andagony. He saw the agitation
for the people thought he had gone starr
mad, without doubt. lmploringly he raiseC
his hands, and cried out :" My dear breth
rem have pity on me. dop't know what
the matter. know the word OF the Lore
is in my mouth, but I'm afraid the devil
in my breeches. .'-7Ne Minister'S We IN III
Christian at Work.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

HFishes," says the Yonkers Statesman, ego
in schoels,n which perhaps accounts for the
alleged learning in these institutions,
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

NEW YORK SLATE ROOFING CO., l27 Church St., PhIa

$500 i: :! =! e: &.
one can fail 10 make money
c.st Ar,v one can do thework You can make from
SO cts 10 81 an hour by devotng your evenings and
snare time 10 The business 1t costs nothing to try the
bnsiness' Nothing like it for money making ever
eered before Business pleasant and strictly honor
able Reader If you want TO know all ABOUT tne Des
waving brsiness before the public, send us your ad-
drsss ana we will send you full particulars and pri
vafe terms free samples worth So also free you can
tben rake up your mind for yourself Address
GFoRG1E STINSON CO, Portland, Maine. aug lSly
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

To Our GIRLs.--Now that you are being
ceurtsd, you think, OF course, 1t is all very
well, and that it will be nicer when you get
married. But it WON'T. He doesn't knew
himself, and you don't know him. 1t can't
last. II must cool down. When he sees
you rs many times as he wants to and
maybe more, when he sees your head regu-
larly every morning in curl papers and the
broom is off the rye, when your home con.
tains a geod deal of wash-tub, cradle and
cook stoYe, he won't stand for one hour in
front Of the house out in the cold watching
the light in your window, he'll be thinking
rather Of getting out of the house. Young
woman, protraot this oourtship as long al
you can. Let well enough alone. A court
ship in hand is worth two marriages in the
bush. Dcn't marry till Christmas after
next,-Ibr.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

And now it is announced that there are
four million unmarried wernsn in the
ceuAtry. CoHe, wake up, yeung men
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

SKILLED WORKMEN IN DEMAND.-ln nearly
every branch of useful industry the supply
of skilled workmen is unqual to the de-
mand. From one cause and another COM
paratively few serve needed apprentice
ship to trades necessary to produce finished
workmsn. The result is to crowd our
workshops with poor mechanics. And one
evil of trade unions is that they make no
distinction between good workmen and
botches.
In our day very few boys are "bound' to
serve sufficient time to acquire proper
knowledge of their trades. Occupations
requiring five or seven years to master are
picked up in half the time, and so soon as
half.taught apprentice can secure mem
bership he sets himself up as a journey
man, demanding journeyman's wages, al
though he may have mastered no more
than the rudiments OF his trade. This
system works evil all round, and employers
and parents should unite to break it up.
Another error needing attention is the
too common notion that it is degrading to
learn a trade. A profession, olerkship--
something neat, easy and "genteer'-is
sought rather than honest, useful toll.
This is all wrong, and the sooner it comes
to be understood the better will 1t be for
our boys and for the country.
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

DETERIORATION OF FOOD.-Few persons are
aware of the extent to whca articles of
food, usually considered necessary, have
been of late years systematically adultera-
ted. Chloride of tin, poison, in twelve out
of fourteen analyzed samples of sugar and
syrup: Prussian Blue, in large proportions,
in "geod gunpowder tea;" and various
poisonous substances, such as chrome yell
low and lamp black used to "improVe the
appearance " of green coffee, are some of
the examples of adulteration set forth in
the report of the committee on manufac.
lures, on the bills now pending in Congress
designed to mitigate and control this great
evil. The rapid increase and dangerous
character of these adulteratiens is an ac
kpowledged evil, and a remedy there
fore is imperatvely demanded, ia the
interest not only of tho unsuspeoting Gus
toner, but also Of the honest dealer, who
is thus subjected to a ruinous competition
all the more burdensome because it il
| illegitimate and dishonest. The dsteriora
ton of food, by the mixture with it o
harmless though inferior and cheaper ingre
dients, without notice TO the consumer
would be bad enough, but when our" daily
bread is adulterated with that which il
deterious and even poisonous in its natur,
and effects, it is time that stop should b,
put to such practices. In the msantim,
enc remedy, that is in the hands of ever,
one, is to deal only with those partie
whose character is such as to give to thei
patrons some reasonable guaranty of tn
purity oftheir wares.-Baltimore Presbyterian
Smyrna times., 1880-04-21

How A KANSAS FARMER Cor WIFE.-A
thrifty German farmer in Kansas wanted a
second wife. The ladies of Kansas were un-
satisfactory so he sent says the Pittsburg Com
n,erciaL of the 9th of March, to friend In
Pittsburg and asked him in brief, business
like letter to hunt him up wife in the
smoky city. His friend happened to be
acquainted with comely German maiden
who was anxious to be married, and pressed
the suit of the applicant in that quarter
He sent photograph of the lady to the
Kansas man, who wrote back that he was
entirely satisfied with her appearance and
to send her on the next train. He enclosed
fare for her. The lady boarded the frst
train, and arrived in Kansas several weeks
ago. She was met by the exPectant farmer,
| and in few hours they were Joined in wed
lock. The sequel of the story is that day
or two since the Pittsburg friend, who was
driver for gentleman in that city, re-
csived letter from the Kansas man; stat,
ing that he was so pleased with his wife that
he desired to reward his friend for securing
the prize for him. Enclosed was deed foI
fine tract Of land in Kansas, and tbs
driver has gone out to settle down,