Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1880-01-26
Hallcaster fntelIige1lcer.
MONDAY EVENING. JAN. 20, 1880.
Why Arc Wives What They Are!

Why Arc Wives What They Are!
Why are wives what they are, and not |
what they might, could and should be?
Because in nine cases out of ten it is for
want Of temper or judgment in the man.
We have all heard of the cautious indlvl-
dual who would see his wife's grandmother
before he took the irrevocable vow. He
was quite right. A man desiring to enjoy
the delight and consultations unknown to
single condition, prepared to love and
cherish under all calamities and changes,
would do we'll, if possible, to learn little
of the early training Of the woman he DC
sires to make the partner OF his joys ana
the CONSIDER of his SORROWS, and to have
some knowledge of her in domestic rcla-
ton.
1t seems hard in this our day to find the
medium between the fashionable wife, all
frivolity, dress and excitement, and the
female virtuoso, or the woman without tact;
but there are women, of many of whom
it may be truly said in Scriptual language,
"the heart of her husband both surely
trust in her. How often arc these women
linked to the vicious and the unstable, arc
obliged to shut their eyes to facts, and
when love is gone, live on enduring? Mar
riage to them has been desperate thing,
a curse and slavery, instead OF the nearest
approach to perfect happiness permitted
on earth.
OF the drunken ruflian, quick with blow,
we have nothing to say-he is scarcely one
remove from the beasts that perish, and
as rule, belongs to the extreme lower
class but among the so-callcd gentlemen
there is the Overbearing, tyrannlcal husband
at whose voice children and servants lice,
soured probably by difficulties i'll his brsl-
ness or profession, but surlily keeping his
trials from his wife, and snappishly resent
ing all her attempts to win his con1ide nee;
Who SO capable as she to sOOthe and to aid
by her womanly tact and discrimination,
made keener by its concentration in her
little world-home and have we not
sacred warrant that the wife is helpmect
for the man, not a slave to minister to his
material wants only, whilst he grudglngly
doles out his money, never dreaming that
the order of his house is only arrived at 10y
a thousand little domestic cares, SO heavy
in the total yet a labor of love when light
ened by kind, husbandly interest. This
man acts as if he were devoid of affection
himself and grossly presumcs on his wife $
early inculcated sense of duty.
Then we have the hcnpecked husband
Now the ccnsorious world cOntemptuously
laughs at his name, and discusses. the anX-
iolls, irritable wife it never troubles 1T
self to consider the weak, vacillating man
he must necessarily bc i'll his safest condl-
ton. He is a nevcr-ceasing anxiety to his
wife, who knows he must either be fool
or a scoundrel She tolls early or late with
brain and fingers to rcctify his sins OF
omission. Her pitiful tenderness must
ALWAYS follow him and hold his wavering
mind in check lest his selfish folly should
bring more troubles into the household I'M
povcrished by his careless indifference,
leaving his wife to fight the battle of life
singIe-handcd. He is only amiable when
gratificd, loving when spared difficulty,
giving few fiattering words of praise tt
his wiic'S clever managcment-morc pam
full than pleasing, for she knows theiI
e-ill-tempcred if forced to do any
thing lie dislikes, and coarse in his taunts
about nagging and pickering. If she Is
righteOusly and stcrnly compelled to give
ugly names to his prOcrastination he vii
occasionally cry peccnrt, thereby firmly be
lieving he has washed out all his sins an'
may begin them again on the moro"
With such man a wife cannot take th'
inferior attitude which all womanly womcl
really delight i'm. but must unpoctlcait,
fulfill Wordsworth's picture OF
"a pcrfcct woman noDly planned,
To warn, to comfort. and command.
Then last, but not least, we have Tho
salt of tue eaih-"reat and gifted, tender
and true men, whose lives are spent IL
making strong resolutions which they
seldom fail to carry out. n husband from
this class is at peace with himself; there
fore gives joy to others, bringing home
light and comfort at all times and under
all circumstances. Self governed, he
Justly exercises rule over his wife, whose
happiness is to anticipate his wishes ant
acknowledge his surcmacy. Excepting
the few in whom the taint of moral base
ness is hereditary, men know full wei
that women, through their strong ailcc
tions. are what men make them.
1t is also a want of faith i'll man thai
makes women unjust to each other, pre-
venting the friendships there might b'
between them, so sacred and helpful, to
woman only knows woman as she rcall,
is. As Byron says" Man to man SO of
unjust is always SO to woman. .-L""d 0"'
Water.