The Northern Pacific farmer. [volume] (Wadena, Minn.) 1878-1885, 1880-08-26
Short Sorts.

ever.
Always cut off in its prime-an inter-
est coupon.
People who live in glass houses should
pull down the blinds.
Knocking a friend down is sure wa,
of dropping an acquaintance,
Miss Kate Forsyth, John McCul-
lough's leading actress, is in Paris.
If you make it hoptional with me-"
says the Englishman, I'LL take beer.
DR.. Tanners favorite poem is Grav's
lode on Il Distant Prospect of Eton."
Permit us to hint that perhaps DR..
Tanner is in the pay Of the melon
trade.
Senator Don Cameron's new mansion
is one of the largest and handsomost in
Washington.
Sanctuary shoes" are advertised in
England. They are warranted not to
squeak.
The Marquis of Ripon has issued an
order abolishing official work on Sun
day in India.
"Please, pass the butter," as the man
remarked when he sent his goat by
rail.
On a tramp-rags A nice figure
100000. DR.. Tanner--he is an English
man.
James Redpath, of lecture lyceum
fame, is to lecture himself next sea-
son.
Elm ma Abbott is writing her autobio-
graphy, which she will call "The Story
of Great Singer"
A punster challenged Il sick mans
vote on the ground that he WAS an i'll
legal voter,
A New Orleans man has just died of
eating matches. DR.. Tanner was trying
to die of a non-eating match.
The Pope's hair is now white. He
has strong and vibrating voice, and
bears himself with the utmost dignity.
The birthday Of Richard Wagner,
the composer, is celebrated in Germany
with as much regularity as if he were
one of the NEUROLOGICAL heroes Of an
tiquity.
Mark Twain has written to the Ell
mira Adue,tise, acknowledging that he
is Il candidate for the presidency. How
nice!
Mr. Earl Marble, II young Journalist
of Boston, has written the ibretto of a
comic opera which Mr.. Alfred Collier
is now setting to music.
A little Jesuit: Son and heir-"Ma, I
wish you wouldn't leave me alone with
the baby, cause have to eat all the
jam, an oranges, an cakes, an things
to amuse her"
An Ohio thief used 4 wagon with
crooked wheel to draw away stolen
wool, and the constable, canght him by
following the eccentric track.
The Tennessee Jubilee Singers, by
their concerning tours, have made $3.50
900 for the Fisk University of Tennes-
see, the college for the education Of
colored people.
He WAS from the mountain side, and
was buying his first glass of soda. II
wish you'd skim off that skum, boss; [
amt paying for no froth, you bet
The Chinese are learning to chew
hne-cut tobacco, but they can never
spit with an American gentleman
while their eyes are so much on the
bias.
General Burnside owns II fifty-acre
farm at Bristol, r. l., and is voted
success us an agriculturist by his neigh
bors ana visititors, with whom he is very
popular.
Mrs. Senator Don Cameron, who is
described as Il woman of graceful pres
ence and bright mind, and the owner
of beautiful large, brown eyes, is among
the few most admired in Saratoga.
According to one of the London stat
istical papers there are 100000, 900
lying idle in England, at the present
time waiting for something promising
Il fair profit to turn up.
2 ofessor Waterhouse, of Washing
ton University, st. Louis, has been APP
pointed by President Hayes one Of the
commissioners to the Worlds Fair, to
be held in New York in 1888.
It is reported that Rev. w. H. H.
Murry ("Adirondack," for short), who
is still abroad, is working to recover his
fortunes, and is possessed of a mania
for paying his debts and recovering pos
session of his lost estate.
An Irishman of Il mechanical turn
took off his gas-met1e to repair it him.
self, and put it on again upside down.
At the end of the quarter it was proved
that the company owed him $15.75.
"What must I d." asked mean
and conceited man of a friend who
knew him well, "to get a picture of the
one love most?" Sit for your own
portrait" was the reply.
Tanner illustrates the value of the
will power. A man who can look at
the good things in a restaurant window