The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1880-11-13
BURDETTE TO THE SMART %
YOUNG MAN,

IHE following gOod-natured but
somewhat sarcastic article is from the
pen OF r. j. Burdette, of the Burlington
HaW6eye:
In the Boston Herald of September IA, read
the following advertisement:
"WANTED.-A chance TO work in some we'll
established business house, either as salesman
or accountant, or both, by young man of
thorough business training, who has never
preached or prayed in public, neither has been
treasurer or superintendent of sabbath
schools, or betrayed any confidence repoSed
in him, but who relies for worldly success on
the old-fashoned qualities of integrity, intel
hgence, good health and good nature; will
work with muscle and brain for the same COM
pensation given by the city for muscle only;
itrst-ciass city references. Address Ii. l.. Co.
Herald Office"
Now, as has been aforetime observed by
MIR. Weller, you generally find every adver-
tisement in II paper promptly answered by
another card in the next column of the same
issue. Where you find the appeal of man
for a situation as salesman, you frequently
md beside it the inquiry of a man who is
looking for salesman. If one man has a
horse TO sell, there is usually some man who
wants to buy horse. And so looked all over
that copy OF the Boston Herald TO see if there
wasn't some business house advertising for
just that sort of salesman. Ididn't find it.
glanced at other Boston papers, but couldn't
see that any house wanted a salesman or
accountant whose first recommendation was
that he had never preached or prayed in
public" got hold of New York paper or
two, wondering if the young man would have
any better show in the metropolis. But l
couldn't see any special chance for him. L
could not Ind that any business house was
anXlously looking for an accountant who had
never been guilty of the grave olfense of
preaching or praying where anybody could
hear him; | couldn't lind that any merchant
was especially looking for some young man
VINO mad never gone wrong so far as to become
"treaSurer or superintendent of a Sabbath
school" They didn't seem to hunger after
that particular kind of young man.
looked at the young mans advertisement
long time, and it seemed to me that he was
very young man, indeed. He must be very
young, or he would know that to preach and
TO pray, even boldly, without being ashamed
of it, in broad daylight, in the presence of
fifty, a hundred, or three thousand people, is
not considered, even by business men, as
vicious habit, or an indication Of loose morals.
do not know who the young man has been
accustomed to hear preach. | do not know
what manner of p4ayer-meetings ne has at
tended, but 1t is very evident that he has re-
ceIVed very erroneous impression Of preach
ing and praying in their effect and influence
upon busiuesS-like character, or upon the
mercantile world. | do not know what kind
of business the young man is anxious to en-
gage in, ii the best recommendation the en-
ploye can offer the house is that he has
never preached or prayed in public" Posi-
bly, desk in the general Office of the Liberal
League, which met recently in Chicago and
was 50 disgustingly goddess and nasty that the
best infdei in America left it in speeches. dis
gust, may be open to him.
And then the young man brings another
proud recommendation to the business house
that may be so 1oHtunate as to receive his in
valuable service. He can lay his hand on his
heart and say, with pride, that he has "never
been treasurer or superintendent of Sabbath
school" This recommendation is rather
supertiuous, as his first one covers the ground.
1t is very likely that if the only recommended
he could bring to the Sabbath-School was the
fact that he never preached or prayed" the
Sabbath-schoOl would endeavor to get along
for Il little while without treasurer or SUPER
intcndent, until it could lind more liberal
candidate, for even the Sabbath-schools and
churches are tinctured strongly with LIBERAL
ism, and set their faces against the bigotry
that blindly and stupidity refuses to see any
good in sermons and prayers, and will not go
where sermons and prayers are made, and does
not want to engage in business with people
who tolerate preaching and praying. Oh, no,
young man, all the "bigotry' in the world
isn't round inside the pale of the church, by
any means
Indeed, the young mans statement of his
position in regard to the Sabbath-school is
only another indication of his exceeding
youth Had he known anything about Sab
bath-SchoolS he would have known that the
"treasurer of Sabbath-school does not have
to give bonds, like county treasurer to keep
him from running away with the money. All,
no; but he often has to run his generous
hand down into his own pocket TO buy the pa
perS and books that the hearts of the little peo-
pie long for.
And then, in consequence of his rigid absti-
young man wishes us to infer ne has never
betrayed any confidence reposed in him."
Well, we don't know yet that any body reposed
any confidence in him. Certainly the church
people never did: they never gave him a
chance to betray their confidence, because he
never preached for them. Nobody ever
placed any confidence in his ability in sunday
school matters, because they never elected
him superintendent, and it is sadly apparent,
from the young mans own statement, that
they wouldn't even trust him with the little
pf arg pnf h
cred up from Sunday to sunday from the little
people. 1t is very thin recommendation for
young man, brethren, when he can't even
be trusted to handle the scanty fund of an av-
erage Sunday-school collection. He doesn't
tell US that anybody else ever did repose any
confidence in him. he simply says that the Sum
day-school people didn't.
And then l couldn't help thinking, as | read
the advertisement again and again, how
quickly after telling the merchants of Boston
that he never preached or prayed nor held
office in Sabbath-scnools how quickly he hast
ened TO assert that he had never betrayed
any confidence reposed i'll him." He seemed
to think that it was time he was giving his
character a "boost." Ordinarily when a
young man asks for II situation in some "well-
established house it Is taken for granted
that his character Is good and that he has
never betrayed any confidence reposed in
him" without setting it forth in the advertise
ment. 1t is expected that he can bring good
references with him. But this young man,
after proudly basing his claims for the situa-
ton upon the fact that he never breaches, and
doeSnt pray in public, and never was Sun
day-school officer, seems to think it necessary
to say something really good of himself. He
hastens 10 assure the mercantile world that
he Is better than they would think, from his
foregoing references, that. if he did stay
away from church and Sunday-school, he
never betrayed any confidence Perhaps il
occurred to him just then that to be preacher
or a Sunday-school superintendent wasn't
necessarily TO be rascal. This young man
really appears TO grow younger every time he
speaks.
But the young man says, scorning che
ministry, the church, the Sunday-school, and
even, rs his advertisement reads, the fact that
he has never betrayed any confidence re
posed in him." scorning all these and setting
them aside as worthless aids to worldly sue
cess, he relies for worldly success on the old
fashioned qualities of integrity, intelligence,
good health and good nature"
And do hope, for the sake of the young
mans worldly success, that his integrity is
greater than his intelligence, and that his
health is better than his nature. For the sam
pie of intelligence that he lays out for the in
spection OF business men in his advertisement
doesn't show up II very good lot. And the
"good nature exhibited in it is not the best
kind of good nature. II is very dyspeptic,
that good nature 1t is discourteous, satirical,
unjust, a little mean, l should say. yes, decid-
eddy mean, and altogether ill-natured. If ii
isn't unjust and mean and il-natured to in
sinuatc that saying ones prayers, or preach
tuu or attending SundaY-schOOl and HhOldiup