The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1880-05-13
VOL IJNT ii;
How 9 Married woman Goes Is sIeepl.

There u asa article going the rcssndS eD
titled, How Girls Go 10 Eleep. =, & The
manner ia which they 20 10 eIeep, accord.
Ing to tho article, can't hold q candle tc
the way Q married woraan eues 20 sleep
Instead Of thiaking cf what sba shouid
have attended TO before going 20 bed. sht
| thinks Of IL aflerwArd. While sfie is re.
| y0iving these matters in her mind. and
while enugly tucked ia bed, The I'D mar
is scratching mis- iegg in front OF the IRE
a1d wondering how lie will pav the nexi
| months rent SuddenYy che sSys:
James, did you lock the door 90
(which door % &
.pThe cellar door, says she. (,
"No," says James.
swell, you'd better go down and lock
It, sor heard como one In tho back yard
last night" 4, VI ),
Accordingly, James paddles down staiss
and locks the door. About che tirno
James returns and is gcing TO get into bed (,
che remarks: q fI5
aDld you ahut the stair doo-Yn
"No," says james.
"Well, if IL Is not ehut the cat viii ret
up in.c the bedroom" r
"l4et her como up. then,' says James,
ilI.natuyedly
"My goodness, nor returns the wife,
"she'd suck the ba5y's breathin
Then James paddles down ataire again.
and steps on tack, and closes che stair
door, and curseB the cat, aud returns to
the bedroom. Justas he begins to climb
into his couch his wife observes:
forgot to bring up. some water.
Suppose you bring some In the big
And so James, with e mnttered curse.
goes down into the dark kitchen. and
falls over % chair, and rasps all the titis
ware OFF the wall, ID seaiah of the ubip,,
tin. aud then he jsrked the etair door
open and howls: & .T Sc
Where the deuce are the matches 2,s
She gives him minute directions where
TO lind she matches, and adds that ahe
would rather 60, and get the water her;
self than have the neighbcrhood raieed
about 1t. After which James finds the
matches, procures the water, comes up
astairs, and plunges into bed. preaentiy1
his wife says:
james, iet's have an understanding
ebout money matters. Nov. next week
I've got to psy'-- .5..s 5ss
II don't know what you,vs got to paw,
and Z don't care" I" shouts james, as he
lurchea aronnd and jams his face AGAINST
the wall; call want Is TO go to. sleep.''
"That's oil very we'll for you.n ppa.ts
his wife, as she pulls che covers yicious.
~, you never hink Of the worry and
trouble I havs.Ie And there's Aramenta.
who believe Is taking the measlee.n
Let her take ZEN" says Jsines, stick
ing his legs out as straight as two RAN.
rods. lSSi 4 s.,
aIt seems to me you have no senss or
feelings" whines bis wife, .sand ifsyou
had any respect for me yon wopldn't eat
onions before you cpns to bed. Tho at.
mosphers Of the room from The smell OF
onions Ia horrid.'' .l.sa'ise
"Well, go down and sleep In the kitchs
en-. then, and let me alone, says james.
Herenpon she begins to cry softly, but
about tho time James Is falling into d
gentle doze she punches him In The ribs
with her elbow, and C1ys
did you hear that scandal about Mrs.
Jones ?n s4
mWhat Tones" says James, sleepiIy.
"Why, Mira. Jones.,'
Where Z" inquiries James.
II DECLARE saye his wifa, ';you are
getting more stupid eveFy day. You
know Mrs. Jones that lives at No 2t.
We'll, day before yesterday, Susan Smith
told Mrs. Thompson that San, Baker
had said that Mrs. Joaes hain-- l.,,;s
Here she pauseS and 1istens. James
is snoring in profound gluinber. With 4
sort of rage she pulls alii the covers OF
him, wraps herself up in them andf lava
awake nntH 2 O. M, thinking hoH badly
abused she is. And that Ia the way Z,
married woman goes TO sleap. 3.Ss DC