Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1880-02-29
Mr.. John POyntz. and His Wife's
Relations.

going 10 have company"
$50 we are, my dear said my wife,
looking = little guilty as she polished
up the surface of the big silver tea-tray
with a new channels leather. They are
all come to visit me-Uncle Silas and
Aunt Melicent and the children, and
Cousin Joab, and the two Miss Wilmer
dings, and my Aunt Louisa TO meet the
Reverend Mr.. Speakwell, from Minnesota,
who married my second cousin, Jerusha
Wilde. Mr. Speakwell is troubled with
eatarrh, and he thinks of staying at our
house for a few weeks while he is being
treated by DR.. Dosem."
I put down nv linen duster and brown
paper parcels with some emphasis.
20, contound the Rev. Mr.. Speakweil.'
said !.
John calculated my wife
well, my dear, can't help it." said
l. Its not in human nature to endure
everything. And l have been relationed'
out of all patience ever since our mar
rage. The Jenkinses went away last
week, the Birdsalls took an affectiOnate
leave yesterday, and now, just as l was
contemplating a peaseful evening by
ourselves, here's Il new swarm, hungrier
than the rest, Just about to settle down
upon u.s. In my opinion, Kitty, my dear,
relations should be abolished"
Il am surprised at you, John,' said
my wife. My own people, that are so
fond Of me-"
There's where you are mistaken, my
DEAR" said l. "Its your comfortable
spring beds and good cookery that they
are fond of, not you"
NJohn"
Id be willing to wager good round
sum on the truth of my assertion, = said 1
Because you have no relations your
self
Thank Providence for that" said l,
devoutly. 81 was reared in q founding
asylum, and have nobody to thank but
myself for my tolerable success in the
world"
'It's no reason you should find fault
with mine," said Kitty, with her bright
blue eyes tull of teals. "And Mr.. Speak
well is such spiritual minded man, and
dear Uncle Silas loves you Just as if you
were his only son, and Cousin Joab is so
interested in our children.
Tin much obliged to 'em" said I dry
". "But | slept all last week on seft
cushions laid in the bath tub, and we
had fourteen people here over the ami
versaries; and was obliged to give up
my own room for month last winter to
old Mr. Manswell, not to speak of our be-
ing half poisoned with Aunt Louisa hy-
genia messes in the tall. When the
poet says, "Thcre's no place like home,"
Ipresume he meant when their were no
relations visiting. I'll tell you what, my
dear, with a sudden inspiration, ''I've a
great mind formally to deed over this
house to your relations, if they will agree
sOlcmnly to leave me in peace for the
rest of my life wheresoever [ may set up
my family tents
"Nonsensc!" said my wife. "Do go up
stairs and change your things, and brush
your hair and get ready for tea. They
are all waiting in the best parlor, and 1
was expecting your return ~ see about
hiring some cot-beds from the village no.
tel, to put up in the attic for those Jour
little Speakwell children. You see Aunt
Louisa has the blue bed room, and cousin
Joab has the little wing chamber, and
Dir. and Mrs. Speakwell have our room,
and"
''lndeed, said 1, "and we are to sleep
in the barn, l surpose?'
''Don't be cross, JOHN said my wife,
appealingly. "One must be hospitable,
you know. And l can easily make up the
sota-bed in the back parlor for our use,
for a week or So"
said nothing, but ground my teeth
in silent despair, as sprang up stairs,
two steps at a time, to make what chang
ss l could in my toilet by the aid of a
ten by twelve mirror hung over the wash
stand of stuffy little bathroom.
The Rev. Mr.. SpeaEwell was big
man, with a still bigger voice, and a
limp, faded little wife, whose sole earth
ly interests seemed centered in her four
white eyed, frcckle-iaced children. I'm
lent couple with excellent appetites. and
two tall boys, who giggled and snickered
at each other in the intervals eff the con-
Yersatlon.
Cousin Joab talked necessarily with
his mouth full, and the two Misses Will
merdings served as general echoes to the
rest, while Aunt Louisa devoured lobster
Said ad libitum, and kept on sending UP
her cup for more green tea, until 1 ITEM
bled for her nerves.
While my wife. careful and troubled,
like Martha of old, with many things,
looked ready to drop with the hospitable
exertions she had made, 1, sitting a mere
cipher at the head of my table, felt as if
was keeping boarding house, without
any of the pecuniary emoluments there
from.
My trunks will be up in the six
o'clock train" said the Rev. Mr.. Speak
well; I'll trouble yeu, Cousin Poyntz, to
send an expressman to the depot for EN-
And if there's any apartment In the
domiclle, Cousin Poyntz, that could be
fitted up as study for my temporary
Use, it would greatly facilitate my intel
iectual occupation during my sojourn in
the surbuos of thisgreat city. And L
must beg of you to keep the house very
still during the hours which I devote to
study
Here my wife looked at me aghast,
thinking of little Johnny and the baby.
ssNeyer mind. nv dear" remarked