St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1880-10-01
revamped wearing apparel as a substi

revamped wearing apparel as a substi-
tute, for consideration.
The press and the public have been
preaching to, at and about the police
very persistently for some time, but the
latest orator was bird, a runaway
parrot which perched itself on a tele-
graph line over against the Head Quar-
tiers and deliberately set to work ours
ing the whole crowd. He drew large
audience and convulsed them with
laughter while the outraged police went
for him with the aid of ladders. He
was captured at last and returned to his
owner, after tightening up one of the
meanest streets in the city with his fun
ny proceedings.
Boston has been settled, it seems,
just $50 years, and in order to help
out the good people of the Hub with
their triumphal commemoration, we
have about emptied our armories of the
crack regiments of the National Guards.
All the nobby young fellows of New
York and Brooklyn who belong to the
corps and could get away from business
have departed in full military rig for a
grand parade and review under the
shadow of Bunker Hill monument and
are sadly regretted by the girls they
left behind them. Meantime, we are
looking forward to political professions
by torchlight, barbacues, &C., on an
unprecedently magnificent scale as the
partisans warm up and the banner ar
lists and campaign equipment people
are in high feather and doing a rushing
business.
There is a new illustrated comic
weekly with cOlored cartoons after the
Puck model, with the not very happy
name of Chic, Gallicism which is
hardly translateable into brief English.
1t is bright and handsomely gotten up,
but the artists are heavily handicapped
by that incompatible genius with
thecrayOn, Keppler, man whose wit
literally OOzes out of his fingers ends
and touches You up in the tenderest
spot in the most unexpected way. 1t is
very justly held that Teutonian notions
of humOr are not congenial to people of
any other race, for Puck is provocation
of instantaneous mirth wherever it is
read.
suppose everybody has read about
old Bijah, of the Detroit Police Court
and his sayings and doings, which have
been largely initiated in various papers
all over the country. The worst of
this sort of machine made fun is that
however good it may he one is apt to
get tired of it, and when expected as
a daily dose it's precious hard work for
the unhappy scribe to cook it up to Or
der. Sometimes, however, we hit on a
gem, in the shape of genuine ludi-
crOus incident, wholly inexpective of
the way it is dressed up. Such an one
occurred at Tombs Police Court the
other day. A long suffering husband
applied for commitment for his wife
on the ground of her being a common
drunkard and scold. The landlord of
the tenement house appeared to inter
cede for her, saying he couldn't under
stand why the rash man couldn't get
along with the woman, who was truth
full, pleasant and Il good example, and
thought the magistrate ought to hold
up the terms of the law for a while.
just then the lady appeared between
two policemen, whose clothes she had
torn to t:stters, she mistOok the benev-
Olent intercessor for the complainant
and went for him with vigor. At each
pause the husband silly and gravely
quoted some of the unhappy mans re-
marks till she was lead screaming be-
low. The old fellow got a sound lesson
to avoid meddling in future and every
one laughed consumedly, even the JUS
tice signing the commitment with an
iIrepressible guffaw. RADIx.