The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1880-10-28
49,
3EttnlQrnuS.
In time-four letters.

Met by chants Tho church choir.
What makes a paper weight---tEe--
hnquent subscribers. -. "
1t was an uhdertaker who said s.'It
is never too late ss.ab end"
Would fourth floor saIoon-keeper
be. called drans-attic MANI.
zlas nsSa MAo was lost in slulabcr-
found l,Fs way out on nightmare.
+ The spots on tho sun do not begin
to create the disturbance as de- the,
freckles on the daughter.
Why do men feel 50 much niore.s
like footing the kSll collector thals
in footing the bill ITSELF
A Boston artist is credited wits 9
having painted an orange peel on the
sidewalk so naturally that six fat
men slipped down on it.
"Soldiers must be fearfully dishon-
est, said Mrs. Partington. 'It seems.
to be an occurrence every night for
sentinel TO berelieved of his watch"
A st. Louis rich man drew up
will which was 50 pathetically wordcd
that it moved all his relatives TO
tears. It left all his property to an
orphan Asylum. Boston Post
''Tom, snid girl to her sweet
heart, you have been paying your
distresses to me long enough It Is
time you made known your conten--
tons, so as not to keep me in expense
any longer"
He couldn't eat-his hair pulled
the next morning. "Why don't you
eat your breakfast, my dear?" asked
his wife. Because of MY happy
tight, think, +" and the skeleton Of
smile crawled round his feyered lips
Sunday-school scholar. to teachers
''Did you say that the hair Of my
head was all numbercd?@ Teacher
''Yes, my dear" S. S. scholar: "NVell,
then" quilting out hair and present
ing iD, whats the number of that
one?
Italy mas standing army of over
1000, 900 soldiers, and about 3,509,-
S97 900 organ grinders, three-fthso OF
whom are residents Of the United
States, and two-thirds of that number
reside in Burlington. Eighth street
being their favorito haunt. BpHliug-
ton Ha,cbsye.
Mrs. -- likes to hear the rain. on
the roof after she goes te bed, and
the other morning she uneonscioIsly
gave utscranee to neat little proverb
as the result Of some natural indigaa-
ton in connection with the subject.
at never rains bat he snores"- these
were her very words. sst so
1t is related that Webster and Clay
we're once standing on the steps Of the,
Capitol, when drove of mules
passed, moving southward. There.
come some Of your constituents, Mr.
Webster" jolingly remarked Clay.
Yes" replied Webeter; s'they are
going to Kentuckyto to teach school
The ambition of our best young
men is to get an undercoat just long
enough to cover up the rear suspen.
der buttons of their pantaloons, and
an overcoat Just short enough to miss
being tangled with the protruding
nails of their boot heels. In the name
of modesty we suggest q general aver
, Fage.
The average small boys ambition
Is to be trapper, a pirate, or song
1 and-dancc man. ''NVhen wath 4
little boy" lisped a very stupid soci-
e ETY. man to a young lady, call my
ideath of life were thentered on being
: clown" 'WeH, there il at least
d one case of gratifed amtdtiob," was
the sharp reply. s11i
A young miss from the country
d went into clothing store a short
time since, says the Rochester Sun
day Tribune. and called for a pair of
zuspenders. The sicl keeper in
quired if she wouldn't have an an
brace" and she swcetly asked: "Ia
the embrace thrlYnin with the sus7
pendersz7 The cioihicr almost
/ faintod. 4
A bold, bad burglar recently broke
'e into the houEe ofa nanin the watches
:, OF the night. The man awakened
= and questioned the intruder: ''What
ne do you wan! here? What look you
81 for? Said the burglar, gruffiy,
ie sMoney!" "Ifold OH minute, :
r. quoth the man, ''iin, / viii help yeu
I've been leaking f.sseR for ten years
but perhaps the tHoof us may hay,
in better luck.
II The precious ones and their suyinss
It when will they ever ccaSe? Here i
1d another from a little daughter Of one o
ev our citizens: who, on being shown tn
2, --latest arrival and was asked by th
n doctor if she wanted 10 keep it, replied
90 "No, nlama's GOT enough babies al
,sc ready" "Bui," replied the doctor