The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1880-11-18

"LIzA JANET Liza Jane I" said the
old lady; tyou take in every stitch of
that washin' tonight for see by the
paper. that there's three delegates at
large in this pari-h."
"IF Jones undertakes to pull my
ears" SAID loud-mouthed fellow on
street corner, che will just have his
hands full" The crowd looked at the
mans ears and smiled.
Profitable Patients.
The most wonderful and marvellous
success In cases where persons are sick
or wasting away from condition of
mtserableness, that no one knows what
ails them, (protitable patients for doc
tors,) ID obtained by the use of Hop
Bitters. They begin to cure from the
first dose and keep it up until perfect
health and strength is restored. Who
ever is afflicted in this way need not
suffer, when they can get Hop Bitters.
--Cincinnati Star.
THE London Spectator asks: "Can
any body suggest stiff bit Of work for
English capitalists to dop" o yes. Let
thcm embark In the laundry business.
StarGhing shirt bosoms and collars is
pretty stiff work.
"WoULD you like TO wash your
hands before dinnerP" asked the host,
pointing to the conveniences.
"No, certainly not,' responded the
guest. "Great Scott, man do you sup
pose eat with my tingers2"
it,n irs To I
OF marking table-linen, the Chicago
Tribune replies: "Blackberry pie is
our choice, alth ough a baby with
gravy dish is highly esteemed by
many.'
IT is sad to think that so many we'll
meaning and naturally joyous spirits
are compelled to 90 through life with
out owning a steam yacht.
LOVE pleases more than marriage,
for the reason that romance IL more IN
teresting than history.
The Princess Louis Is said to be un-
able to sleep. The poor LADY must 60
to church occasionally.
THIS is world Of strange contradlc-
tions; one woman Is unhappy because
she isn't married, another because she
is.
COULD not the doctor's fee be justly
called ill-gotten gaiasY
lLLKaAL kissing on the nigh seas must
be muzzled by the strong arm Of the
law.
DIR. Il. V. PIERCE, Consulting Phvsi-
clan to the Worlds Dispeneary and In
valid's Hotel, of Buffalo, n. Y, has
resigned his seat In Congress, that he
may hereafter devote his whole time
Worlds Dispensary Medical Associa.
tion Tor the treatment of Chronic Dis
eases.
EvERToN TAFFX.-Pnt one pound of
powdered loaf sugar and one teacupful
OF water into brass pan; beat one
quarter of pound Of butter to cream;
when the sugar is dissolved add the
butter, and keep stirring the mixture
over the the fire until it sets, when
little is poured on the buttered DISH.
just before 1t is done, add six drops OF
essence of lemon. Butter tin, pour
on the mixture and when cool it will
easily separate from the dish.
LIVER HAsH.-This hash is delicate
and appetizlnQ, and nice as a change
from the liver and bacon known to all
cooks. Boil the liver until thoroughly
tender-there must not be even sus-
piclon Of hardness about T.. Then
mtnce 1t finely with chopping knife.
Heat the mince very hot in sauce or
rOux of butter and Drowned
flour. The seasoning is pepper,
salt, dash of lemon or q little piquant
sauce, such as mushroom catsup.
10 keep insects out Of bird cages tie
Up little sulphur in silk bag and
suspend 1t In the cage. For mocking
birds this Is essential to their health,
ants and other Insects from the cages
Of all kinds Of birds. Red ants will
never be found in closet or drawer If
small bag Of sulphur be kept constant
ly In these places.
THE following remedy Is said, on
good authority, to greatly alleviate
whooping cough, and IT applied in tho
earlier stage will mouify It so that the
patient will suffer no more than an Or
dinary cough. Evaporate slowly over
the gas or spirit lamp weak solution
Ut carbolic acid in the room (ulosed)
where the child who already has the
cough, or who may have hcc exposed
10 1t, Is at play or asleep, for hal an
hour twice q day, while any symptoms
Of whooping remain.
WHEN you drive nail into wall
clothes press or closet, to hang things
on, drive 1t tn rough a spool up to the
hoad.