Montgomery County sentinel., 1880-04-30

| AA'J hiohOy' ~ was ihc u uIIhIii--l SceIiltl
to be drawn on to my ruin by some invisi
BILE but resistless power. When ! had los
ALL strange calm came over me, which
had never understood. 1t may have been tn,
reaction after night of feverish excitemint
or possibly 1t was the unnatural calm tina
follows the death of hope. My selfcontemp
was complete. No language could have ex
pressed the intensity of my self-scorn
sneaked to my lodgings, feeling that hat
parted with my manhood as well as witt
my money.
"rhe very next day | was surprised by
the offer of lucrative subordinate position
in Federal office in San Francisco. Thi
was not the first coincidence of this sort in
my life where an unexpected influence hat
been brought to bear upon me, giving my
plans and prospects new direction. Has
God anything to do with these things, OF Il
it accidental took the place which wa.
offered me, and went to work with renewed
hope and energy | made vow against
gambling, and determined to recover all
had thrown away. l saved every dollar
possible, pinching myself in my living, and
supplementing my liberal salary by literary
labors. My savings had again run high up
in the thousands, and my gains were steady
The Frazer-River mining excitement broke
out. An old friend of mine came to me
and asked the loan of a hundred dollars to
help him off to the new mines. | told him
he should have the money, and that would
have it ready for him that afternoon. After
he left the thought occurred to me that 800
was very poor outfit for such an enterprise,
and that he ought TO have more. Then the
thought was suggested-yes, sir, it was sug-
gested-that might take the hundred dol
lars to faro-bank and win another to place
in the hands Of my friend. l was fully re-
solved to risk not cent beyond this. The
idea took possession Of my mind, and when
he came for the money told him my plan,
and proposed that he accompany me to the
gambling hell. He was free-and easy sort
of fellow, and readily assented. We went
together, and after alternate success and
losses at the faro bank, it ended in the usual
way: | lost the hundred dollars | went
home in frenzy of anger and self reproach
The old passion was aroused again. A wild
determination to break the faro bank took
hold upon me. | went night after night,
betting recklessly until not dollar was
left. This happened last week. Can you
wonder that have concluded there is no
hope for rs weak u fool as ann"
He paused II moment in his rapid recital,
pacing the floor, with his hand on the ham
mer of the pistol, which he had taken up.
"Now, sir candidly don't you think that
the best thing can do is to blow out my
brainsf' said he cooking the pistol az he
spoke.
The thought occurred to me that IL was
no uncommon thing for the suicidal TO give
away TO the homicidal mania The man
was evidently mad, and ready for tragedy.
The pistol seemed almost instinct with con-
eide was to end the scene, | preferred the
former
allow old are you?" asked aiming to
create diversion.
81 am forty-five," he answered, apparently
brought TO a little more recollection of him
self by the question.
IL should think" continued, having ar
rested his attention, shat whatever may be
your follies, and however dark the future
you have 10 iace, you have too much man
hood In sneak cut Of life by the backdoor Of
suicide"
The shot struck An instantaneous change
passed over his countenancc. Suicide ap-
pcarcd 10 him new light--as II cowardly,
not an heroic act lie had been facnated
upon his career amid the blaze Of blue light
and the glamour Of romance and the dig
nifty of tragedy, amid the wonder Of the
crowd and the tears Of sentimental. That
was all gone the suicide WAS but poor
creature, weak as well as wicked lie was
saved. He sank into u chair as he handed
me the pistol, which was very glad indeed
to get into my hands
"You should he ashamed Of yourself" |
continued "You are only forty years
old you are in perfect health, with almost
u giants strength, a classical education, ex-
tensivc business experience, and with II
knowledge Of the world gained by your
mistakes that should be a guarantee against
the possibility of their repetition a brave
man should never give up the battle--thc
brayest never give up"
"Give me the pistol" he said quietly;
"you need not be afraid 10 trust me with IL.
The devil has left me | will not act the
part of coward You will hear from me
again. Permit me 10 thank you. Good
morning"
| did hear from him again. The devil
seemed indeed 10 have left him. lie went
to British Columbia, where he prospered in
business and got rich, became a pillar in the
church Of which his father was one Of the
great lights, and committed not suicide, but
matrimoDy, marrying a sweet and cultured
English girl, who thinks her tall Yankee
the handsomest and noblcst Of
men.