Litchfield enquirer., 1880-08-19

ALInOUdH lie WANTED To DELL LOG v ERY
BADLY.
'Can sell you a dog, cheap?" asked
dllapidated individual of an Eagle editorial
writer on his way to his country seat Friday
afternoon.
eff you sell it to me at all it'll have to be
cheap, responded the editor, mentally refer
ring to the fact that the Office doesn't pay off
in the middle of the week any more.
"Hes good dog, urged the canine mer-
chant, and he's the most intelligent dog you
ever saw. got him trained now so he's
worth big money"
"What can~he do p asked the editor.
"Do! That dog can do anything. He saw
ed six lives last month"
"HOw 2"
"Well, he didn't bite anybody. There's
peculiarly about his bites They are poison
GUS to burglars, while they only tickle his
friends. Bite the gentleman in fun, Mag
nus I"
mo not Never mind 1t isn't necessa-
ry. Can't he do anything but bite p
"Well, should rather giggle, partner
You see that dog standing there on all four
legsF Watch him. Sit upon the stump of
your tail, Magnus. There you see he don't
DO it, That's the commonest trick in the
world That was the only thing he knew
when l first got him, but you notice how I've
broken him of it, don't you It's heap hard
er to break dog of a trick than teach him
new one, and that one thing shows he's a
good dog"
But what tricks does he know ?"
know Why that dog is an improved
life saving apparatus Just come down to the
river and fall in. That dog will snake you
out quicker'n he'd go Dor grub. Come and
try him once"
Rather not. Take your word for it, Is
he good watchdog ?"
"Now You have hit his principal profession.
That's the way l got that dog, partner.
was burglar myself once. None of your
common racket, but a wholesale, with branch
es in all the principal cities l was working
q plan one night and up hoped this dog,
Touch anything Why, partner, he wouldn't
even let me wash my hands. Thinks l,
that's the dog for me, and just fetched him
away. That's the reason can afford to sell
him SO cheap. Didn't cost anything"
How is he among children ?''
Next to burglars, children is his favorite
pastime. You know it spells dog to have
Children monkeying around 'em all day, and
this dog knows that; so he just keeps em
away bv growing at 'em pleasant like. If
it's strange children he tears 'em up, but if
it's what you might call his own Children,
what belongs right around him, he just keeps
CHI away 80 lie eau WalCH em.
Catch rats?"
mot he. Don't you know that dog amt
good for nothing else :? Always smashing
dishes and the like of that But you buy
this dog and You won't have any rats to catch.
He'll just eat up everything within four miles
OF your place and leave nothing for the rats
To feed on. That's the way to get rid of rats
Starve 'em out won't lie to you about
dog, partner. Tn tellin you frankly what
he'll do"
what else is he good for 2"
Good for! Did you ever see dog charm
ing sickness away from the house?
met that remember N3Es
swell he just rolls around froths at the
mouth and spts and snaps and you'd think
he was going to die. But he amt That's
because the sickness intended for the family
is going into his system. You'd better keep
few rods away when he's busy charming,
cause it disturbes him to be interfered with,
but he fetches the sickness every time"
Don't it ever kill him p
''Some time he may get SO bad you'll have
to shoot him, to put him out of his own mis-
cry, but just think what he saves in doctors
billsl A dog like that is worth thousand
dollars month"
"What do you ask for him?"
tWeIl, you can have this dog for dollar
and quarter, cause he's little off in one of
his tricks"
(Which one is THAR"
Reading the morning papers to deaf
mutes; however-say, mister, don't you want
the dog ?"
But the editor had turned the corner.