The Benton weekly record. [volume] (Benton, Mont.) 1880-1885, 1880-09-03
A Romantic Situation.


Miss Angelina Apem went rusticatin:
last summer with her ma. They fount
board at a pleasant country homestead
where there was already quite a party
Miss Apem desired to make herself genel,
ally agreeable, and decided TO cttltiTatt
the acquaintance Of the grandmother {.
the household OH the very first eyeEin!
after her arrival. accordingly after tea
when the boarders had assembled on thu
porch to enjoy the cool breeze, Miss Apen
opened on the grandmother, who was bus1
with her knitting.
s'This is a very romantic situation,
said the young lady, addressing the Fener-
able dame.
The latter looked at her inqt1iriHgIy.
'sThis is /: very romantic situation, =
repeated the young lady, in he sweetest
tones, and little louder.
The old lady said, 4 am little hard
of hearing: please speakaoude1
''This is: a very romantic situation, =
again repeated Miss .Apem IN higher
key, coloring slightly, and ookinsg 4 little
embarrassed when she sal that's WIS
attracting the attentioltzof z assembly.
The old lady looked thoroughly puzzled, !,
and said, "A leetle louder, Miss. y
The young lady reddenedyisibly. Three
gentlemen were looking at ler with quiz
zical expressions, and four ladies were
taking III the situation with an evident
relish. Miss Apem gathered herself for
the final struggle, and concentrating all
her power of speech, she shmted, 'This
is a very romantic situation
Three eldcrly gentleman jumped SO sud-
denly as to throw their eyeglasses from
their noses. A croquet party came run
ming around the house to see what was
the matter. The house-dog thought an
army of tlamps had invaded the premises,
and ran toward the gate, barring savage
ly. The man of the house thought the
fsh-pedlcr had arrived on his weekly visit,
and yelled, ''Four pounds Of white fish,
three Of trout, and five of full-heads."
A man from town, who was passing in ::
buggy, thinking some one had asked him
about the news III the city, replied, "Noth-
ing new.''
Miss Ape1n,s situation by tlis time was
any thing but romantic. She was blush
ing like red, red rose, and the perspira-
ton had started from her forehead in such
profusion as to take the crink.e and friZz
all out of her hair. Her pleasant smiles
had given way to a look Of panied expecta-
tion. She watched the old lady nervous
IL. Did the old lady hear this time?
Would She answer? Must Miss Apem
again yell at her,. These welc the ques-
tions that chased each other through her
throbbing brain. It was a critical mos
ment. Il seemed ages to Miss -ipcm.
All the acts of her life came crowtling up
before her. She was about to speak. Miss
Apem listens:
''Wall, don't know about it's bein'
very rheumatic around here. IhaYc lived
here nigh onto seventy year, an | never
had tech of pain Of any kind, except
once when the brindle Ileifer Kicked me
in the shins as was nlilkin' on 'er |
tied her tail around her hind leg to keep
her from whiskin' on it into my face. She
got mad cause she couldn't whisk her
tail, and up and kicked like al creation.
/ rubbed arniky on the shin, and ! was
all right in Il day or two. But Jim Shaw,
who lives over on the cross~1uHd, he has
complained ofrlInmatiz 4 good many years
a ah and n az t epfnfes nfs hi h IaRii il Ris back
stiff sometimes. Do &c ever have the
rhumatiz -
BY the time the old lady had finished,
Miss Ape,n had tainted dead away, and
had to be carried to her zoom. The shock
TO her nervous system was too great.
The old lady looked somewhat surprised,
but retained her presence Of mind, and
shouted to persons who were assisting
Miss Apem:
ssIf she has got the rhumatiz bad, come
an II f,at ,,y bTttfn pf arniITv =