Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1880-09-04
WHOLE NO. 1886.


81 had, somewhere in my trunk,
yellow programme, Announcing q
grand combined exhibition at Louis
vile, but I can't find it now" said
the Elephant.
II saw the Rocky Mountain Goat
make a lunch Off it," said the Kan
garoo. s
"NOw, by my beard, {" snOrted the
Goat, "yOu are a liar as we'll as the
original carpet-bagge and beet''-
YES, that Is Just Ii, - interrupted
the Wart Hog in the adjoining COM
partment it's butt, butt, butt, all
day long with you, till my head
feels as II there was a Masonic con-
clave going on inside of it.n
"Oh, dry upl'' growled the Sea
Lion. Ever since they published
your photograph i'm Harper's Week
ly, as the picture of q Southern out
rage, taken on the spot, by their
special artist, you have been putting
on more style than Jim Robinson's
equestrian ape"
"Well supposing they did. I'd
like TO know II you don't 60 ia for a
solid North?" N
livery good" muttered the Polar
Bear, Ice see the point"
"What we want here is less poll
tics and more mash," roard the
Hippop0tamus.
''You are just from Egypt, and
what do you know about Ameii-
can politics ?" put in the porcupino.
t'Welp' retorted the Hippopota-
mus, "Egypt's in Illinois isn't IL,
you one-horse quill driver, 60 ahead
among the advertisers, where you
belong"
"No one can believe anything YOU
say" cried the Heghog, for you am
fib-ious.p
"Ha! halv laughed the Hyena.
"Lets have a Gnu-deal," said tho
horned Horse OF Ethiopia.
"But what's to become of US, 81
multaneous cried the Jackal, Wolf,
Buzzard and Sloth, ifthe Repubuli-
can party is turned outP'
"Join DR.. Tanners party" said
the Fox.
Harmony harmony good
friendsEl interposed the Ostrich.
"Lets remember that we are re-
spectacle beasts and not pollti-
cians.n
whats nice advice to come from
the biggest bolter in the gang"
sneered the Zebra.
SET hadn't swallowed that last
brick, :" screamed the Ostrich, "I'd
mashlyouf Jaw with It'll III j was
condemned to wear stripes all my
life. I'd stay. in the penitentiary,
where / belonged, and not try and
stick my nose into decent society"
"Three cheers and a tiger for
Authur ~ roared the man eater
from Bengal.
"Hancock and English ~ thun-
dered the Lion.
ssWeaver foreverl" shrielCed all
the Parrots "He's i'm favor of us
greenbacks.
f'During the war, when I was In
New Orleans" grunted the Alliga-
tor
d "You stole all my silverware,"
cried the Spoonbill.
"Great snaix, what row about
Kissed the Anaconda.
"SwallOw your bile''-
SCI wish you'd quit swallowing
my blanket" meelIly said his mate.
"Tush," replied Mr.. A. "Your
constant complaints are becoming a
regular boa,"
1Be more high.toned i'm your re-
marks and aspirations, my friends"
suggested the Giraffe.
"You wouldn't take anything be-
yond your reach; oh dear noW said
the Rhinocerous.
81 wouldn't take so many horns
that they broke out on my nose"
replied the Giraffe.
"Comrades, remember the Obliga-
tions of our ancient order," protest
ed the Elk.
ayes / remember that you hav-
emit paid yours" said the Badger.
"To change the subject, my dear"
said the Mandrill to the BabbOOn
g ifas Darwin claims, man descends
from the monkey, pray, what docs
the monkey descend from g'
"From the tree, of course, "philo-
5ophicaIly replied Madam IL.
''I see," gallantly whispered he,
with an adoring smile, "that you
are well up in every branch Of the
subject"
"The class in natural history will
stand up" said the Camel.
"What distinguished individua
do remind you OFF"
"Richard the Third"
"Next ?"
"Hump-hrey Marshall.V
"Whaf animal does the baggage
man most dislikeY'
1.-The 1.-The. elephant"
"Cause he can't smash his trunk"
"Why is themule the best Of phy-
sIcians ?"
"Because he is mans greatest
heeler when he approaches his latter
end"
'sWho first used earthenware ?"
tfThe CrOck-Odile." fI...H
"Who first wore shoes Z"
"The Alligator"
"Whe was the first woman%
"The Roc Buck"
"By whose son was America dis
covered ?'' n r
ssBi-son.n
"Why is the Goat a poor poker
player 2" thn iftFa tf-f
'9Because he won't pass the buck"
"Who invented the baby byJumper?"
1.-THE Kangaroo"
"Who was the first public speak
sr among usP'
"The Ass.N o.i
SIS he still speaking?
"You bet, by big majority"
"Who is he speakig for Y''
"Gar-n
s'Boys 90 slow" said the SlOth,
here comes the manager, and you'd
better adjourn until the afternoon
performance.
Mrs. SUSAN J. HENRY, widow OF
the late Capt. Patrick Henry Of Rev
fame, died a few days ago
IN Washington. Mrs. Henry inner
ted property which was lost during
he war. Fora number ofyears she
was a clerk In the Treasury Depart
aud at the time of her death had
ust rnceiVed an aDDOlntmcnf In the