The Sunday herald. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1866-1887, 1880-10-03

NVW, my uctr, hi'iu VII. DpOOp'Iuvkc,
AZ he stretched himself and drew on his pan
falcons, you have cleaned these trousers first
rate. This il what call economy. 1t saves
money. If had taken them to the tailor's
1t would have cost q couple of dollars at
least, and you have saved just that amount"
and Mr.. Spoopcndykc went to his ablutions
and then pulled on his shirt.
"Tll clean your coat, too, if you like"
said Mrs. Spoopendyke. "Leave it home
some day, and Pll take this spot out of the
Sleeve" and Mrs. Spoopendyke hustled
around and looked delighted with the idea of
pleasing her husband.
"Whcrc's my suspenders ~ asked Mr..
spoopendyke, screwing himself around and
looking down his back. "You didn't clean
the suspendrrs clear out of sight, did you 2"
"Thcy were there when you put on your
pants" said Mrs. Spoopendyke. "Ihavcn't
touched them. Whatdid you do with them?'
"Oh, yes, certainly; did something with
them What dye 'sposo did with them
Think | set 'cm up in business somewhere,
don't We Got an idea / gave 'em a vacation
TO go fishing, haven't ye? Well, didn't,
and more'n that, didn't send 'em away to
he educated for the ministry Where's my
suspenders' Whcre'd you put 'cml 'Spose
Pm going around holding up these pants all
day? Think got no business interests be-
side holding OH my lrceches with both hands?
What'd you do with the mcasly tlingsl
81 know didn't take them off the pants, /"
said Mrs. Spooendyke, pulling open tho bu-
reau drawers and hustling things around in
vain endeavor to find the missing articles.
May be can fix your pants so you won I
need any suspenders to-day, and I'll find
them before night" suggested Mrs. Spoopcn-
dyke.
"That's it. You've got it," raved Mr..
Spoopendyke. "lIow are you going to fix
'em? Going to tie them on with shoestring,
like you do your bustlel Going to walk be-
hind me all day and hold 'em on? P'raps
you can pull 'cm up and button 'cm around
| my neck How d'yo propose to fix em
Going to put en- on me upside down, so il
| they fall they'll fall upi If had your head
| I'd go out to service as u file. Fix 'cm, why
don't ye? Why don't ye fix 'emY These
trousers are getting sick at the stomach,
waiting to be fixed And Mr.. Spoopcndyke
shot across the room and dove under the
wardrobe in search of the lost suspcndcrs.
81 They must be there somewhere"
Show 'em to me! I" demanded Mr.. Spoop.
cndyke "takc stick and point 'cm out tc
mo OF course they're here somewhere, only
| inst put your thumb on 'em. What have W
done with 'cm Can't ye recollect whether
| y
heather, like you did my dressing gown, OF
whether you planted them to see if they
would grow, like You did my straw hat
| Think they walked off like n croton bug
S'pOse those slispcnders have taken their Cir
to a picnic What kind of housekeeping de
you call this, anyhow Where's my sus
pcndcrs ~ howlcd Mr.. Spoopcndyke, pokinl
around in tho spoiled clothes bag. "Whcre's
those sispenders p and he pulled the book.
of tho shelf and rumaged around behind til,
case with broOm-handle for u divining rod
Just let me buckle them tight behind, ,
said Mrs. Spoopcndyke; "tIle strap will hold
| them"
IT, "Tlat's the scheme" slrieked Mr.. Spoop
endykc; something's got to hold them /
| was ~ sharp AZ you I'd get rich hiring ont
for an oyster-knife. All you want is to hav,
somebody sit cross legged on you and com,
home two weeks after you're expected to be {
tailor-shopl Going to find those dog gasted
| suspenders between now and the next war p
" ! know they were ON his pants when II,
put them on" unused Mrs. Spoopendyko, Ell
tering upon little inductive reasoning. GIL,
didn't take them off, and so they must b,
there now," and egood woman approached
her husband with smile.
"Oh now they're going to be fixed, said
Mr.. Spoopendyke, with horrible grin
"P'raps you're going to cut button-hole il
your hands and feet and hang over my shoul
ders, amt yel Want mo to put 'em on Ove
my head like measly skirt with two tucki
and llounce to it, don't yoi' May be you
think those suspenders hurried down I,
breakfast, SOS to get the first crack at tn,
morning paper, don't ye p
But Mrs. Spoopendyke made no response
Opening the back of her husbands hutter
ing shirt, sllo saw the missing suspenders