The comet. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1877-1882, 1880-03-13
How Member of the MiSSESsinpi
Legislature PaImed Himself
off as IL Doctor.

An exploit of a present member OF
the Legislature has come to our knowl-
edge that equals in small way, some
of the doings Of Shocco Jones, whose
practices are familiar to all who have
any acquaintance with the adventur-
Gus history of S. 5. Prentiss.
Our Legislative friend represents
one of the river counties, which one,
we must not say nor are we at liberty
to give his name, though in all candor
we can assure the reader he was one
of the clearcst headed and most sensi-
bic members of the late House of
Representatives. He was a planter
at the time of this episode, and had by
reverse fortune lost his all in the pro-
duction of the South's great staple.
Lute in the fall, after the crops had
all been gathered, and his business
wound up, he realized he was a ruin
ed man unless he could go to New
Orleans and by pledges Of good faith,
secure advances to run him the next
year. With this object in view he
boarded boat ut C., near which
landing he was then living, and
started for New Orleans. His purse
contained only money sufficient to
purchase passage to Nicksburg, with
Il few dollars over where he expected
to have casheI certain drafts safely
stored away i'll the inner depths Of his
pocket. On the boat, as young men
will occasionally do, he met with con-
genial fellows, and the result was
that in short while his whole stock
in-change, had dwindlcd down to a
paltry dollar. How to get along the
remainder of the journey on so small
an allowance pcrpleXed his brain, but
human mind possesses Il fund OF
ingenuity, rs the sequel will fully .
show.
The boat was day and nights run
from the Hill City, and our friend i'll
a spirit of melancholy and distraction
came to the bar and invested two-bits .
of his solitary dollar i'm something to .
arouse his dropping spirits. Presently .
another twc-bits went in the same .
way, leaving half dollar to last him .
the next twenty-five hours just at .
this moment the clerk OF the boat, in
a communicative way, remarked to
our friend that an Arkansas gentle
man was in his stateroom exceedingly
sick, and that no physician was aboard
TO administers his ailmcnt. In
spirit of fun our Legislator said that .
he was sometimes called Doctor .
at home. The clerk was delighted at
this piece Of Information, and insisted
upon his visiting the old man. Pull
ing out a pair OF eye glas-c, that had
been given him TO have mcndcd, and
knowingly adjusting them upon the
tip Of his proboscis, he walked in to
perform his assumed functions. The
old man was lying in bunk, rolling
from first one side 10 another, and
groaning as if his soul was preparing
to take its fight. The wUuld-bc
Doctor looked wise, caught hold Of
the afflicted mans pulse, and recalling
a favorite and stereotyped expression
Of the average physician, said consol-
ingly:
"Don't excite your nervous system
unnecessarily"
The old fellow gruaned again, and
vowed he could only live a few mo-
ments longer.
Don't excite your nervous system
unnecessarily and you viii be relieved
was the response Of the
who Immediately ordered
the boats medicine chest to be sentin. /