Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1880-09-28
JOLTED JOTTINGs.
Short Sentences JOlted From the
Mouths Of Street Car Passen.
gers.


a number of ladies and gentlemen who
were awaiting a car to take them to
church, leaned a news-gatherer against
a friendly lamp-pOst, and with the
meekness of Moses awaited the tide Of
events and the mule-bOx.
After waiting thirty or forty min
utes, and displaying an amount of
patience worthy of a better cause,
the crowd began to wonder ifthe text
proved interesting to those worship
ers who had the good sense to walk.
Il believe l hear a box car coming"
remarked one individual.
Eyes, l see the light, said another,
stepping to the middle of the street.
notice a light something like a
young drugstore put in a listener,
but / don't understand how you can
be certain it was a car"
"0h, that's easy enough, just nc
tice how it wobbles like a flea on a
red-hot stove" was the forcible re-
ply.
After a lapse of FIVE or ten minutes
the crowd entered. and with the re-
porter, skipped merrily onward at the
enormous speed of six hours a mile.
EUREKA SPRINGS.
The conversation turned on Eureka
Springs and the wonderful cures per-
formed there.
why" said lady passenger, II
know of one old man that after stay
ing at the Springs for a few weeks had
as beautiful a suit of hair as l ever
saw. He said his head was as slick as
a billiard ball when be went there.
1 knew old Jim Blank twenty years
ago,and his head would certainly have
made a good skating rink then"
May be he wear a wig" suggested
somebody.
mo he don't" was the reply, 'for
Maria gave his hair a good pull and
said it belonged there. They say they
have a barber regularly employed in
the billiard hall there whose business
it is to shave balls regularly every
morning but then" she added, MOTTO
ing the load Of incredulity on the
faces of those about her, that last
may be an exaggeration.
Other ladies went on to give %instan-
ces of the wonderful cures performed
by the waters of Eureka. According
to their stories if one was fat and
wanted to grow lean, had black hair
and wanted golden, was blind and
wanted to see, had been crippled for
forty years and felt a desire to take a
promenade, was forty and wanted to
marry a girl of sweet sixteen,
aged as the hills of Zion and yearned
for the freshness of youth, or had
ridden on Memphis street-cars until
he was a wreck, a ruin, a sarcasm on
humanity, and wanted TO regain his
normal state all one had IN do was IN
go to Eureka.
Most Of the passengers we're willing
to believe at least part Of this, out Of
respect to such good authority, but a
few Of the Oldest passengers doubted
the efficacy Of any remedy for persons
Of the latter class, and m~ournfully
rubbing their shins, Ssmuttered too
thin"
THE oUsT0MHOUsE.
Il have noticed several beautiful
en~gravings Of your customhouse here
remarked a visitor who had remained
to transact business after the jubilee.
Il would like to see it."
When will you visit US again, sir2'
asked a friend.
Not for some months"
will You be around next centen-
nial?"
We'll, hardly, why?'
"Ifyou do your wish may be graft
fed, was the reply. Memphis amt
much on custom houses takes a hun
! dred years or 80 for a southern city Il
: build such an edifce.'
Here. the car seemed to take ofensc
. at a lamp post,and jumpingunconcern
= edly from the track, started off after
it. 1t changed its mind however, anc
. tried to get back, but couldn't. anC
Y the passengers stepped cheerfully our
e into the mud and lent their shoulder
9 to the task.
Il
. After dcpositing its passengers a
u the various crossings and churches
the reporter was left alone. He fel
t asleep and dreamed he was beinl
S hauled to the cemetery. The vivid
5 ness Of the dream awoke him, and he
noticed that the car had increased il
|, speed to eight hours a mile. Not full
aroused, however, he asked:
. Say, driver, whose funeral is this
. anyway
oil 1t will be yours young fellow, /
d you keep up that strain tying III.
reius around the brake and preparip.
= to take a siesta in the corner Of tn.
sleeper.
d Knowing, however, that this ieh,
n had been on his feet for thirteen hour