The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1880-12-08

Walking TO where we were sitting, ne
saluted us in the following language ::
"Be yeu the editor of the AdUocate g.
We deliberately affirmed that we oc-
cupied the chair.
He then unceremoniously pulled from
his pocket a bundle OF manuscript and
handed it to US, then, hopping the sweat
from his face by the use of his coat
sleeve, he sat down.
We had begun a sort of review of his
pecuIiarly-composed composition, when
he warbled out
sfTm a poick, I is ! I'm the author
Of 'Jeems Slapfitter's Love and How
He Escaped Death ?"
He kept on talking, but we did not
deign to notice him. Suddenly We came
to a verse in his metrical composition,
which did not seem to convey harmGnl-
GUS ideas. But let us give sample.
Here it Is as written:
RURAL SCENE.
az GEORGE WASHINGTON NAPOLEON BoNAPARTS
TOM JEFFERSON SMITH.
Twas yestere'en that did view
rural barn-yard scene;
Oh! sang the cat and barked the ewes
While Rover chewed bean.
s'See here, Mr.. Smith" said We !;
"You don't seem to apply good poetical
sentiment in this. You've got terribly
mixed up. 1t is evident that wide
mistake has been made. The cat Is not
noted as melodious singer, neither
does a sheep bark, at least common
domesticated sheep does not, and I'm
sure the dog does not eat beans very
extensively"
Just then he few in and explained.
This was his pellucid explanation
"Mr. Editor, you don't understand.
I was not speaking of the common
domesticated animals IN that sublime
poem, but aotld ones! :"
"Mr. Smith, your poem is entitled,
"A Barn-Yard Scene, we said with a
kind of mock gravity, "and it wastaken
for granted that you meant those AMI
mails that are usually found around and
in barn-yards."
We thought we had him; but, no
He gave good proof, and We caved in
1t was this
at have seen rattlesnakes in barn
yards, and Tn sure they ere not domes
ticated"
"Weu, well, Mr.. smith, good
ENOUGH. " said We, and resumed ON
reading.
The next poem that we took UP WA:
entitled, "Baatitudes of Sublime Ide
atty" Nice subject, thought we; so
beginning a hasty perlsal, we found th'
first verse to run as follows
Dark, dark are the channels Of mysterious thought
Beautiful are tie Clouds that o'erhang us above;
Mysterious Nature and Old Time have wrought
A change on Jonesy GaG his love
bow beautiful is language and ideas spherep
That sng,est to poets thoughts go fair;
While the sun dances jig upon his lett ear,
And ssssS 20 skating through The air.
Said we: 4" Mr.. Smith, you've en-
tirely oyerdone yourself in counting the
muses.. Your poetry has the jingle, but
remember all is not gold that glitters.
A complete analysis Of your poem vii
teach that You need more harmony. You
have used some redundancy in your tirst
line. Could you not have thrown out
'overharg' OF 'aboveT One, in this
case, Is sufficient to express the sub.
Unity Of the heavens. The tenor o.
your poem was ruined by bringing IL
the ridiculous with the sublime. In tbs
first pa.t Of your poem you speak o.
the beatitudes of nature, and then the
effect is ruined by speaking of 'Jonesy
and his love, and you further say tina
the sun danced jig on Lis left car,
which is neither sensible nor beautiful
as tie sun does not possess such organs
about its person. :"
This cIilicisIn cooled him; his eyes
glimmered, his knees knocked together
ana With tremulous voice he said
Mr. Editor, CUB it up. / stole en-
anyhow, and thought EN- good and I'll
own that ] tried to be plagia1ist
Tom Murdoch, in conjunction witt
Luke Bhhef, wrote those poems.
With q self-possessed cir he expector
ated moutliful Of tobaecojuice in tn
face Of our devil, and serenely wake
out.
We remained editors of the Adoocat
a-aort Willie, and in that space Of tim
so1nany authors tried to ntimidate on
Young mind by making us believe the
were the authors Of Beautiful Snow,
Lines to a Skull, g Locksley Hall
AMI others, that we concluded We woul
go back to our fathers farm and live
little while longer, by stimulating OF
physical organism by welding the pio
and holding Tie hos and rake. So enc
our story Of " Editor for @ Sort Tirl
Only"