Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1880-04-08

had black hair rather thin and tinged with
gray, and eyes in which CLEANED the fires of
determination not to be easily baked. She
walked into Major Huse's office in Patterns
block, and requested private interview, and
having obtained it, and satisfied herself that
the Law students were not listening at the
key-hole, said slowly. solemnly and impress
lively. 81 want divorce"
"What for | supposed you had one Of the
best of husbands" said the Major
| 81 'spose that's what everybody thinks.
but if they knew what I've suffered in ten
years, they'd wonder | hadn't scalded him
long ago. | ought to. but for the sake Of
the young ones. I've borne it and said moth
ing, I've told him. though, what he might
| depend on, and now the times come. won't
stand it, young ones no young ones, Ill
have divorce. and if the neighbors want to
/ blab themselves hoarse about it, thev can,
for | won't stand it another day
But what's the matter? Don't your hus-
band provide for you? Isn't he true TO YOU
! Don't he treat you kindly" pursued the
LAWYER.
I'VE get victuals enough. and | don't
know but he's "a true and kind as men in
general; and he's never knocked none of us
down. | wish he had. then I'd get him into
| jail and know where he was nights" retorted
the woman.
Then what's Your complaint against
him.
We'll, if YOU must know, he's one of them
plaguey jiners." "A WHAT"
"A jiner. one OF them pesky fools that's
always jining something. There can't moth
ing come along that's dark and sly and hid
den, but he'll jine it, If ANYBODY should get
up society to burn his house down, he'd
JIne II just soon he could get in ; and
If they had to pay to get in, he'd 90 all the
suddener. We hadn't been married more'n
two months before he jined the Know
\othins. We lived on a farm then, and
every Saturday night he'd come tearin' in
before supper, and grab fistful Of nu,cakes
and go off knawing EN-. and that's the last
I'd see Of him till morning And every other
night he'd roll and tumble in his sleep, and
holer, "Put none but Americans on guard,
George Washington and rainy DAYS
he'd 20 out in the corn-barn and lab at q
picture Of the Pope with an old bagnet that
was there; ought TO put my foot down
then; but he fooled me so with his lies
about the Pope's coming to make all the
Yankee girls marry lrishmen, and TO eat up
all the babies that warn't born with a cross
on their foreheads, that lc, him 20 on and
encouraged him in it,
Then he Jtncd the Masons Prap, YOU
know what them be- but don't, 'ccpt thcy
think THEY'RE the same Kind of critters that
built solomon, temple and took care Of
his concubines; and of all the nonsense
and gah about worshipful masters and
squares and cumpasseS and sch like. that
We had ia the house for the next six months,
YOU never see the beat. And he. never
outgrowed II. nuthcr. What do YOU think
Of a man. Square, that'li dress himself in A
white apron. bout blg enough for a monkey,
hlh. and go marching up and down. making
motions and talking the fooliShrs, lingo al q
picture Of George Washington in a green
Jacket. and trus, on hls stomach Amt
he loon, tick Well that's my sam. an
I've Rood il a- long a> I'm goln' to-
The next lGnSe the fool made was into
the ODD Fellows. ! made It warm for him
when he came home and told me he'd lined
them hui he kinder paciticd me by telling
that they had sort of branch show that
took women, and he'd get me IN a. soon a.
he found put how tn do 1t. Well. one night
hc come home and said III been proposed.
and somebody had black ballcd me. Did il
hIssclf Of course. Didn't want me round.
knowing to his going, on. OF course he
dTln't, and told him So
Then he jined the Sons Of Matter
Didn't say nothing TO me about it, but
sncaked of one night, pcrtcndln' he'd got 10
set up with a sick Odd Feller; and I'd never
found II out, only he came home looking
Ike man that had been through a thrash
lng machine, and ! wouldn't do a thing for
hlm TIL he owned up. And its gone from
bad 10 WIS. and from wus TO wusser. jinin'
this and that and t'Other. till he's Worship
Minister Of the Masons, and Goddess Of
Hope OF the Odd Fcllcrs, and Sword-swal-
lower OF the Funigans, and Virgin Cereu,
of the Grange. and Grand Mogul of the
Sons Of Incidence, and Iwo-edged Toma-
hawk OF the United Order OF Black Men,
and Tale bearer OF the Merciful Mankins.
and skipper Of the Guild of Catherine
Columbus and Big Wizard of the Arabian
Knights, and Pledge -passer of the Reform
Club. and Chief Bulger Of the Irish Machin-
lists, and Purse keeper Of the Order OF the
Canadian Conscience, and Double -barreled
Dictator Q! the Knights Of the Brass Circles,
and Standard bearer Of the Royal Archan-
gels. and Sublime Porte of Onion League,
and Chambennaid of the Celestial Churubs,
and Puissant Potentate Of the Pe,rifed Pig
stickers, and the Lord only knows what else
I've borne it and borne it, hopin' he'd get
EN- all ined after a while, but tan't no use
and when he come home last night. and told
me he'd got into new one, and been made
Grand Guide OF the Nights of Horror,
told him Id quit and | will
Here the MAJOR interrupted. saving
We'll your husband IS pretty well initiated
that, fact; but the Court will hardl, call
that good cause for divorce. The most of
the Societies YOU mention are composed Of
honorable men, and have excellent reputa-
tions. MANY of them, though called Lodges,
are Relief Associations and Mutual Insur-
ance Companies. which. if Your husband
should die. would take care Of YOU, and
which would not see YOU or him suffer If YOU
were sick
See me suffer when I'm sick :" Take
care Of me when he's dead !" Well, guess
TS"u w anu l can J. .a', Ret another.
! hsie pieh'' u EN-. anu the. heeoh
po'iei themselves "leh l III SIGN ei'lel. II
"ah' 70 DC SIGN anu sunei' iis none oi ther