The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1880-10-21
The Bachelors Confession.

The Bacnel0rS C0nIesS'On
I live in a French fat. Of course
there are objections to French flats.
So there are to most things. cannot
afford hotel, and 1 detest boarding
house. A bachelor of thirty odd, WHO has
been at the mercy of boarding house
keepers all his days, can easily under
stand that.
So, when engaged suite of rooms
third floor, in French flat edi6ce-
and arranged my household goods there
in, with fine lookout over green dot
in front, and the glimmer Of the Pail
sades far away to the rear, above for
est of shipping, considered myself we'll
off
What is my profession 1 haven't
any in particular. 1 am an artist, and
draw a little, daily, in front of my
easel 1 contribute to the press and
write when the divine af1atus seizes
me. 1 read law when feel like it. and
L draw regular income from snug lit
tie property, left me when my uncle
died in India Consequently was able
TO decorate my new quarters very pref
tily with Bagdad rugs, old China drag
ons black and gold Japanese screens,
and pretty pictures I had picked up at
bargain.
And when the FIRE was burning cheer
fully in the CRATE, that first rainy May
evening, the student lamp shining softly
on the red carved table, and the waiter
from neighborng restaurant had
brought in my frugal dinner Of a
broiled bird, mold of currant jelly,
a slice of roast beef and q raspberry
dumping, l considered myself pretty
comfortable.
Upon the whole" said to myself,
"I rather approve of French flats"
rang the bell
The janitor, respectful, decent sort
of fellow, in a round Jacket and carpet
slippers, answered the summons.
'Janitor," said l, "who occupies the
floor aboveT
"Nobody, sir" he answered. "Last
party moved out yesterday. New parry
moves in tomorrow
"a large familyf" said I, rather dubi.
ouslv.
''Bess your heart, sir, said the man,
emo family at ALA single lady, sir.
At this congratulated myself more
and more.
II shall have prospect of little
peace, now, | think, said |; ana ate
my dinner in FOOLS paradise Of happl-
ness.
The single lady moved in on the NOR
row. She must have moved in when l
was down town, selecting some new mill
boards and color.tubss for the Summer
sketches that l intended to make; for
when l returned, fondly expecting once
more to enter into my kingdom of peace
aud serenity, everything was changed.
There was Dangling and pounding
overhead, humping and hammering-
q sound as il some middle-aged giantess,
in hob. nailed shoes were enjoying her
self in promenade.
I sent for the janitor in rage.
''Is the house coming down. said |.
'It's the new Tenant a-movin' in,
SIR" said he. apologetically.
docs her furniture consist entirely OF
Herrings safes and square pianosP said l.
There is two pianos, sir" said he.
"She's musical"
1.-The deuce she isl" roared |. Two
pianos! And does she play on 'em bothP
Don't know, sir, Pm sure" said the
man, with distressed expression of
countenance
| endured the noise until midnight,
and then l sent up the janitor's wife.
''lhe third floors compliments to the
fourth door, and would like to know if
this sort Of thing is to go on all night"
Down came the woman again.
Fourth floors compliments to the
third floor, and wishes to know if he
expects. people to be settled without
noiseP
The next day the piano-only one,
ACCOMPLISHMENTS was elaborat-
ing selection for scientific essay, and
il disturbed me seriously. l endured it
AS long l possibly could, and then had
recourse once more to the janitors wife.
Third floors compliments to the
fourth Aoor, and will feel obliged if she
will favor me with little peace and
4 - lo.,.. .ro,,L D., do gonna n aces.