The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1880-09-11
JUMBLES

Among the postoffices recently estab-
lished in the United States were "Baby
Nine" "Blow Horn" "No Co." "Buss"
and Necessity"
They said "She never told her love, but
let concealment like worm in the bud feed
on her damask cheek;' but when they found
1t was not love, but the remains of a cold that
was surely and sadly leading to consumption,
they procured for her n bottle of Slnes' Syrup
of Tar, Wild Cherry and Hoarhound 1t is
needless to remark that she recovered. Sold
by all druggists. rs cents per bottle. II
"A very disagreeabie old gentlemen dies.
A nephew, charged with the duty of pre-
pairing his epitaph, suggests: deeply re-
GREETED by all who never knew him."
--"Dr. Tanner, sir" said bluff English
justice of the peace, 'ff he were in this
country I'd commit him for getting his live
lihcod without ostensible means of subsist-
ence."
The negros definition of bigotry is as
good and as inclusive as that of Websters
Dictionary. "a bigot !" said he; "why he's
a man who knows tao much for one and not
quite enough for two"
--Toddekins is a very small man indeed
but he said lie never minded it at all until
his three boys grew up to be tall, strapping
young fellows and his wife began to cut
down their old CLOTHES to fit him. And then
he said he got mad.
ITO be2 or not to beP That is the quos-
tion.n Whether tits nobler I'm the mimi to
tlp nphpg *
Is heir to, when oyertaken by severe cough
or cold, or to purchase a bottle of Sine's Sy-
rup of Tar, Wild Cherry and Hoarhound and
by thus opposing, end them. Sold by all
all druggls. 20 aud 90 cents per bottle.
Confession of a son-in-law to his future
mother-in-law-"Iti is as well that I should
tell you before marriage that l am rather
hot t-tempered, and sometimes get mad with
out reason" Future mother.in- law-"Oh,
never mind about that. III see that you
never lack reason"
--Somo gentlemen were remarking on
the entire absence of resemblance between
two brothers: al consider them strikingy
alike" said one of the party. "Ahke ?" eX-
claimed the astonished group; "why, what
likeness can you possibly see between them?'
"Well, there both confounded FOOLS" was
the reply.
"A New York man, who had been deaf
sixteen years, suddenly recovered his hear
ing by being near steam boiler when it
exploded. There ought to be very lew deaf
in New York since such remedies are al
ways at hand by simply attending an excur-
sion down the harbor.
--Sines' Syrup Of Tar, wild Cherry an
HoaThOund stands at the head of all prepare
tions of Tar HOarhound, and it needs only one
trial to satisfy the most incredulUus that it
Coughs and Colds it has no equal Sold by
all druggists at rs and so cents per bottle.
lie had not seen his friend for many
years. The other day he met HIM coming
up Galveston avenue, with hiswile on hisarm
accompanied by little boy, and said; 81
would have known you anywhere by that
boy. He has got your mouth and chin, but
his nose, eyes and forehead are precisely
like his mothers" The boy was an adopt
ed one. Tableau.
"A young man in the city Of Galveston
gave collector bill of $25 to collect
Meeting the collector the young man asked {:
"Did you get the money!" "Yes, he pal
up" Chow much are you going to charge
me?" "Well, l tell you rather like your
looks. I ought to charge you something,
but won't. I'll just keep the $25 and call
it even"
For Group. sudden and severe attacks Of
Gold, take Sines' syrup OF Tar Wild cherry
and Hoarhound.
They have taken to hold Sunday schools
in tents out West, and when a deluded boy
crswls under one of these tents only to Gnd
himself just in time to be sized and asked
if be is looking for the path to heaven, he
feels awlully DISCUS O., ard so d, ei the
teacher when the boy replies, "No, Im look
ing for the monkeys cage"
-Husband-"Mary, my love, this apple
dumplng is not half done" Wle-"Well,
finish 1t, then, my dear"
Mothers, before giving your little babe
cough or Group medicines, remember that
Sincs Syrup of Tar, Wild Cherry and HOar-
hoand is the only Cough Preparation that
contains no opium, morphine nor any other
narcotic.
-"shall help you to alight?" SAID a
young gentleman, addressing a bouncing
country girl, who was preparing to jump
from carriage. "Thank you sir" sweetly
replied the girl, "but don't smoke"
An economical father writes to his son !:
'My dear boy, send you six new shirts,
made rom FIVE oil ones ofmine. When you
are through with them send the back; they
will make six new ones for your l:ttle
brother"
How different are the Aldermen of
Cleveland from those of any other cityl In
a report in the Plain Dealer we lind that
"Alderman Blank arose and made a few
sensible remarks" Can he be hired to re
move to Detroit?
--"Quo,h the Raven, mover more ~ But
he had no reference to Sines' Syrup Of Tar,
Wild berry and HOarhOund, for IL only ~ eds
one trial for people evermOre to use il n cases
of Colds and Coughs and all affections OF the
Bronchiil Tubes Sold 10y all reliable drug
gists at rs an 50 cents per bottle.
-Anu now lne s'dSlue Hotcl- httlltI slls
Down and counts his gains and meditatiycly
says to himself "Is 275 per cent. profit
enough to warrant me in running the old
shebang another year, or shall we have a
terrible couAagration in November? | gueF
I'll conaag."
This is It n fairy tale although there Is
some magic gbuat it; and If you have any
desire to hnd out what kind of tale II is OF
wherein the magic lies, ask your druggist for
a bottle of Sines' Syrup Of Tar, " lid cherry
and HoarhOund, and the secret may be learn
ed from the inside wrapper. Sol by all drug
gists at 25 and 90 cents per bottle.
The friends OF C.who is man Of brains
are astonished that he should be captiyated
by Nine. n. who is goose. "What pleas
ure can yoT take in listening to her non
sense?" asked one of them. c, replied "a
never hear her talk but she is so pretty
look at her talk"
-Walker--Are there any two things as an
! taRonistic as Hancock and Garheld ? Mlllel
Certainly, Rheumatism and Roberts Em
I brOcation. Walker-Why Mhler-Becaus'
J where the EmbrOcGtion Is IL is too hot TO
hat &tt1N ~ al II M