The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-09-17
The GRANGER'S STORY;
Three Elopements in One Night.
BY ISAAC WALDRON.

She was young, gentlemen, an she
was sassy, an jest as full of solid sense
as she was of fun-an' she was full of
fun within prescribed limits, as an egg
Is full of meat.
She knew her mind, too, an could
love like woman when she was sot to
it, as the story shows. There was no
better nor hkelier gal in this country,
which she's proved since, an the way
she did up them two city lawyer stu
gents was fun, gentlemen, fun-thankee
---lemme hev mine with jest touch of
lemon.
Yes, she's the gal that eloped with
three fellers in one night, an as re-
spectacle a gal as you'll find in the
State to-day.
Was she well behaved Well, you jest
bet your life she was. Lively an bright
when she was woke up, she was most
thunderin' smart girl when it came to
takin' business charge of herself
She was as pretty as pictur' that's
Jest ready to walk out of its frame. Her
har seemed to float all around her head,
an when the wind blowed through it
an the sun ightened it up, it looked
like a gold mine-such as you read
about. She was a fresh, wholesome
lookin' gal as ever was, with bright
eye that went through man like a
buzz saw through n pine log, an she
had figger as round as huckleberry,
an sweet as q butternut.
Why, I knowed her when she was
only so high she was born an raised
f,Nxt har
ter of about $4,000, was left by her
grandmother in trust with old Judge
Willes, an he looked out for it too.
The gal lived with her grandmother
till she was Is, an, when the old lady
died, she went over to her Aunt Hllton's
for three years till she got married, an
they say she made it lively for them two
women; in her own demure-like an in
nocent sort o style, of course.
Thankee yes, [ smoke evenin's some
times.
The way it commenced was something
like this: You see, gentlemen, L got
partickler here and partickler there
till / got the whole thing.
Jennie-her name was Jennie Thomas
then-hed he'd kind o. sneakin' regard
for Jed Billings, smart young farmer,
fairish off, but not over well-to-do at
that time.
They'd went to school together, an
Jed. one day, he'd hauled her outer the
-5mlll-pond. Shed fell into it in one of
her wild scrapes tryin' to walk across
the dam on a four-inch edge, an, from
what / heered at the time, l guess
that was the way the affair began be-
tween 'em.
But somehow, she was kind o. offish
TO Jed, yet that young farmer he'd good
eddicashun-frst-ra and was known
to be square-that is, square as square
goes nowadays, when the golden rule
appears to be to do unto others as others
would do unto you, if they got the
chance.
But whether it was that Jennie want
ed to hev her little foolin' afore she tied
up, or whether she wanted to see If Jed
really loved her, or whether she wanted
to fool him an SOW her female wild oats
t, or what not, land only knows
As L said afore, howsumever she was
'offish, an wouldn't make no regular en-
gagement, and right in the nick OF the
worry, them two lawyer stugents from
the city arrived among our midst.
You see, old Judge Parker had his son
Sam an his nevvy Charley Clifford to ed
dictate, an he fixed 'em both up for law
yers, jest as if we warn't over-stocked
with them chaps, same as we be with
army-worms an yit, gentlemen, were
scarce OH good hay-makers an farmin
help genrally, as you know.
The nevvy, Charley Clifford, was
prime good Teller as everybody's aware
of to-day. But Sam Parker was per-
ticklarly curious cuss an bid fair to turn
out jest such mean, cross-cut Hghtnin'
calculator as his father was-which most
of you know'd we'll enough, partickly
when you had any affidavys to be done
al the old man wanted his % cents in
advance.
Well, as soon as them young sharps
graduated an come home they both sot
their eyes on Miss Jennie.
Lor' bless you, in the mornin' you'd
see Sam drivin' her out to the pond in
Parker's old gig, an in the afternoon
Charley ii be takin' her up Garden
Drive in the same shaky but respectable
winnicle. 1t looked good deal like
dead race for Jennie's $4,000.
Now Jennie's aunt was dead down on
Jed Billings, because he was only far
mer, though even then, gentlemen, he
looked a blame sight more likely to make
a big farmer than either o. them other
fellers did to make big lawyer. Any
how, Jennie's aunt didn't care much
which of the lawyers got her as long as
Jed was KEEP out. But the cunnin' old
lady rather preferred Sem Parker, be-
cause he was sure to hev his fathers
practice, while Charley might hev to
whistle good while for client. Then,
too. Sam he'd a way of fatterin' her up