Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1880-04-01

Bore.
Gen. Brsbin in the Philadelphia Times.
One day not long after Mr.. Lincoln
issued his emancipation proclamation,
Mr.. Wade came in, laughing all over
his face and SAID:
"Well, old Abe has just done the
damndest thing you ever heard of.
He has given out that he has the
smallpox to keep the politicians and
otfice-seekers away from the White
House."
The story ran thus: Mr.. Wade
went to the White House to see Lin
coin, who had been ill. He found
the President little pale, but jolly
as he could be.
"Sit down, Wade 1 am glad to see
you. Oh, have the funniest thing
to tell you; it will make you laugh.
[ never did such thing before in my
life, and never will again" Then
the President laughed until the tears
ran down his cheeks.
"Now, Wade" he said, "you are
not to repeat this outside, for it
would give ottense, and it by no
manner OF means comports with the
dignity which is supposed to hedge ,
President about. The doctor put
me up TO it to rid myself of bore;
| ought not to have done it, but l
could not help it, it was SO funny.
You know | have been i'll, and great
many people have wondered what
allied me, but none of them could find
out. The truth is | was worried to
death, and talked sick pretty much
by one man, the most everlasting
bore you ever saw, who wanted an
office. knew he would come again
as soon as | was able to sit up, and
the doctor put me up to get rid Of
him by saying | had the smallpox
| only got out yesterday, and sure
enough this morning he called upon
me. | had determined to be polite
to him, but he staid SO long the hu-
NOR seized me and | sent for the doc
tor. Giving him the wink, held out
my hand, and inquired:
doctor, what marks are those on
my hand?"
''That's varioloid, or mild small
pox,' said the doctor.
"Wcll," said |, Its all over me.
It's contagious, is it not, doctor?"
Every contagious, indeed" he re-
piled, ''and you should see no one"
My visitor, who had been getting
more and more nervous every mo
ment, now could stand it no longer,
and, rising, said:
"Well, Mr.. Lincoln, / can't stop
any longer. l just called to see how
you were and then he started to
hurry out.
stop minute; l want to talk to
YOU said |, ''about that office"
excuse me, Mr.. President; YOU
are not well this morning, and l won t
bother you," said he, showing to-
wards the door.
"Never mind,' said / "don't be
in hurry. It's all right, and if you
are going to get the varioloid YOU
will get it now, anyhow; so you
might as we'll SIT down.
THANK you, sir, but I'll call
again." he replied, fairly turning liv.
id and executing a mastery retreat
from the fearful contagion with which
he supposed me to be afflicted.
''Now," said Uncle Abe, sit will
be all over the city in an hour that ]
have the smallpox, and you can con-
tradlct the story, but l want you to
promise you won't repeat what have
just told you"
Wade laughed until he was weak,
and when he could get his breatl
sufficiently to speak, he looked al
the clock, as was his custom, and
said:
"Now for a little business, ant
then l will CO. --
"Don't CO." cried Uncle Abe, ant
laying his head in his hands on the
desk in front of him, he laughed un
, til he shook all over. Presently rails
ing up his face from between hi:
hands, he wiped his eyes and blew
, his nose until the report sounded
, like the winding OF horn. Afte
, another fit of laughter he said:
, ''Wade, you should have seen him
and how scared he was. I'll bet tha
, fellow never comes back here while
. am President, '----.
:, AS might have been expected
, hardly had MIR. Wade quilted th,
White House when he heard til,
, President had the smallpox, and wa
very sick. Wade promptly contra
, dicted the story, but that night it wa
;. telegraphed all over the country, ant
a many people will yet remember tn
, story of Mr.. Lincoln's having tn
variolo;d during the war.
+ Commenting on the report, Uncl
Abe said to Wade: t'Some peopl
: SAID they could not take my procla
= nation very well, but when L get tn
! ! smallpox, Wade, l shall then hav
a something everybody can take