The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1880-08-26
Surprised 10 Death-An Anti-BiIiOus
Dose fhal Cost n Life.

LITTLE KOCK, ARK, August Zf.-Oiu
John Morris, the colored man who used TO
bring shuck kcollars and twist tobacco 10 the
city, has been arrested on very serious
charge. From the first he took deep in
terest in DR.. Tanners chidren-of Israel eX-
pertinent, and on one occasion was beard
to remark that DR.. Tanner would be the
best-advertised man in America, and
that any medicine made by him would
have ready sale. Yesterday he came
TO the city and exhibited paper
showing that he was the sole agent for
the Tanner anti-bliOus cordial. He went
around TO colored tenement house and
read his certificate and produced his medi-
cine. The colored people can fight against
malarial influences with much more success
than white man can ever hope to attain,
vet they are always ready to take anti.bil-
ious medicines, some think because it places
them nearly upon an equality with white
people. With slight depression IT can be
proved that this theory has oore than a
shadow Of foundation, for once when there
was a union ball given In the Sixth Ward
the colored man who could
PRODUCE A CERTIFICATE
that he had been bilious, no matter how
remotely, was entitled TO seat among
the white people, while the sable gentle
man who had no such testimonial was
compelled to eat among the "niggers," and
eat at the second table.
Well, old John exhibited his anti-bilious
cordial, and, as an inducement to colored
purchasers, he proposed to give certit-
cate of biiOusness.
"Lemme see yer tongue" said the Tan
ner agent TO a woman. "BiliOus, heab }" !;
and he poured out spoonful Of his cordial.
The woman swallowed it, but by the time
old John made out the certificate OF bilious
ness he found that the woman was dead.
The woman's husband called In policeman
and had John arrested. He was taken be-
fore magistrate for examination.
"Did you ever study medcinef" asked
the Justice.
"Yas, sab"
"What books have you read?"
"Pse studied de signs Of de moon mostly.
rs read books, too, but / forget dar names.
Some folks forget de contents oh book an
Tecolecls de name. j forgets de name, but
recollects de insides."
"Where did you get the medicine you
gave the woman?"
81 made hit from directions sent ter me
by DR.. Tanner"
~ w nat are It's COIDDOucul p"iA
"Hit's made outen roots from de groun'
and leaves frum de trees. Does yer wanter
buy bottle, Jedge?"
"Ne. sir, / don't. The charge against
you is serious one. What made your
medicine kill the woman"
WHAT KILLED HER.
"Why, Jedge, de medicine didn't kill de
'oman."
"What killed her?"
"Why, Jedge, de 'oman died oh de sur
prise. You see she had been takin' ebery-
thing in the medical market, an hit didn'
do her no good. She didn' hab much conf
dence in my medicine, and when she tuck
hit, an fOun' that hit went right ter wurk
tearing at the corners ob de biliousness, hit
surprised de 'oman ter death. Yer can't
hole man for surprisin' anybody ter
death. Ef | comes am tells you a good
niece OBJ news an you falls dead, de law
can't hold me 'sponsible; am, 'cordin ter
de same 'stronomy, II i gins woman q
dose oh medicine an hit surprise her ter
death, de law can't put de clamps on me:
Wby, dat 'Oman was so 'stonished ana
tjckled dat she Taught herself 10 death. III
YER wants 10 hang a man fol tickling eny'
BODY, les go ahead; but IL you doan ketch
hit when Abraham gifts yer under his arm,
den Pse willin' ter take de sitewation as
boss fireman on de debi's railroad. Pse
got more reason about me den any man IN
de English lan'wage, but wen yer gifts me
stirred I'D Pse wussen p0lecat ter hlsteG
umbrella"
The Justice is considering the points ol
Johns powerful argument, but John is IL