The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1880-02-17
Serse and sNovsense,

S~V"~ ese* SS~s("S'sfS~e
She was plump and beautiful, and be
was wildly fond of her. She hated bin,
but, woman like ,strove to catch him. He
was flea. '3 it
"Shall / hereafter darn your stock
ings3" is said to be the fashionable Ian
guage for a young lady to use when ma
king a leap-year proposal. p
Gen. Hood consigned bis ten mother
less children to Mrs. Hennen few
hours before his death. and they are to
live in her care at Austin, Texas.
A witness In court was asked II . par
ty to suit was truthful man. "No, "
he answered, ..he'd rather lie at sixty
days than tell the truish for caah,p
A Kansas boy earned nice Bible BY
committing 800 verses to memory, and
then traded bis Bible for q shotgun and
accidentIy shot his aunt in the leg.
"What shall be done with Alaska p
queries an editor. Probably it would
be about as well to let Alaska remain
where 1t is--sor year Or two, anyhow
An old bachelor said be once fell ii
love with young lady, but abandoned
all idea Of marrying her when he found
that she and all her family were opposed
to it. -
| The Prince OF Wales is growing st
bald that by the time be reaches tn,
crown Of England q wig will have to &C
company it to make him presentable q
q King. aa ro
| A bright little ive-years old miss wa
taken to the barn to see some sheep, and
after looking at them for q moment, sh
exclaimed: 40! Auntie, see! The sheeI
all wear their hair banged" ms IS,
When You see -four or five childrel
who need combing, washing and patch
ling, holding conversation ON o from
door step, you have come to hous
where the mother paints pottery.
4 A stranger dropped q wallet contain
iEg $4,000 on the streets Of Fair Play
IlCol., and the citizens let it lie there IN
til be came back for Il. They though
it was some new feature introduced int
the string game. -.
i (which side Of the street do You liv
oa, Mrs. Kipplei" asked counsel
cross-examining witness. "Oh, eth
Ter side, sir. II you 60 one way, It's o.
the right side; II you 60 the other way
tits on the left" laisl ~ !,
| In struggling 70 make q dull boy un
lderstand what conscience is, a teache
finally asked: "What makes you fet
uncomfortable after you have don
wrong ?" "Father's leather strap" fee
ipgly replied the boy. .4ei.i l
"Grandpa." says Minnie, reHectively
| with some assurance of being able
impart useful information; "grandpi
lido you know where this snow come
from Z Let me tell you The angels al
up in the sky cutting up ice with scis
sore.
j "Young man." said the orator, in
Ipressively, "do you want to go down {
a drunkard's grave?" "Well," replie
the young man, with q careless grace {
man, who isn't accustomed to refusing
81 don't care il | do. Where abouts
your gravef" f59t
i A Detroit damsel was offered sixt
} dollars il she would wear an spro
made Of ted-ticking when she stood U
to be married, and she went right o
and selected . husband and won th
money. The young man that won thI
J, girl is going TO be rich. ai5a
"Ma, does pa kiss you because i
loves you so 7" inquired q little boy {
bis mother. aTo be sure my son; b,
Why do you ask that question 2" "Wel
guess he loves the kitchen girl, TO,
for I seen him kiss her more'n fort
times, last Sunday, when you were |
church."
, Like the generality OF kings and col
querors, Frederick the Great had ph
losophic indifference to the death I
others. In one OF his battles . batta
ion OF veterans taking to their heels, !
galloped after them, bawling ou
, "What do you run away for, you ol
+ blackguardsi Do you want to live TO
! ever?" fatf ~ raa~
81 A pompous, fat Methodist parsol
( leading class, came across . lame siste
!, Thinking to comfort her about her ii
/ trinity, concerning which che was e,
} ceedingly sensiti7e, be said; "My siste
there'll be no cripples iu heaven" ""An
| no purse guts, either" she snapped on
/ winding up the remark with heart
"thank God! 49,. fs.6
The roaming correspondent OF u
Burlington Hapksys tells q pleasiu
{ story of sslf-sacra6cing traveller wh
devoted his energies to the work OF d,
3 vouring everything upon certain raj
g way station encounter, and haviu
a at last accomplished the feat wake
' away, saying: "There the next fello
Q that comes along here will get somethin
: fresh.' m - ~ m sl.ss
p A clergyman asked his Sunda,
school, "With what remarkable weapo
did Samson at one time slay q numb'
of Philistines ?" For while there W.
no answer; and the clergyman, to ASST
the children little, commenced tappin
bis jaw with the tip Of his finger, at Ii
2 same time saying, Whats this what
this ?" Quick as thought, little fello
innocently replied: "The jaw-bone Of a
ass, sir" 0 si'' s9
A Tennessee darkey preacher hol
forth recently as follows: "You girl
call your swe. thearts sdarlings, and 70
men call yours daisies and you girl
. are afraid to come up here for fear SON
other girls will get of with your sdal
llngs," and you men for fear some othe
fellow will get away wilhy your daisies,
said he, "between this darling, and ida
sy' business, lots of you niegers are g
ing straight TO hell"
!, "Annetta" wants to know il there
J "a healing cure, tender balm for Q low
: strickea heart 2" Annetts, child OF ID
| usual destiny, there is; you just bet 20.
ETHEREAL language there is cure, thel
e is tender balm Get sea sick, Apnetts
: 60 to sea for . week; and II the biz
Y Atlantic serves you as IL served us, yo
a will spread it on she record that It
Al n q q