The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1880-06-11
sELEcrED MIscELLAxY.


The eonjunetive mood-Tboughts of
matrimony.
California lawyers assert the legality
Of wife beating.
Fish bite best in rainy weather.
Like some men they are always around
when there is a drop in view.
The Freeport Journal says ''pairs are
abundant at that place, and front gates
are loaded down with them on fine
evenings"
After a Texas jury had disagreed for
ninety-six hours the judge got a verdict
in two minutes by sending in word that
a circus was in town.
Josh Billings says "Giye the devil
his due reads well enough in u proyerb.
but what will become OF me and you IL
this arrangement Is carried outi"
When the afectionate father of five
grown daughters calls at the hard ware
store fer an extra stout pair Of hinges,
II means that the spring campaign has
opened.
Since nm Oswego man vas fined three
dollars for shaving a man on Sunday,
the great question in oswego every
sabbath Is, ..What shall l do 10 lie
shavedi"
Freshman-"I say, this umbrella I
bought Of you last week is all coming
TO pieces" Shopkeeper-.'Indeed sir.
You must have been taking It out and
getting 1t wet. sir, I think"
A husband pleaded to q libel for
divorce on account Of cruelty and neg
lsct. that his wife. the libellant, spoke
harshly TO him and threw pillows at
him, which resulted In dyspepsia The
divorce was granted.
$50 you call it a charity ball, do
you?n said the old gentleman, nodding
his head toward n lady whose corsage
was particularly brief. "well. 1t re-
quires a good deal Of charity to excuse
this style of dressing"
Priest-You drunken sot! The very
beasts Of the field give you n lessonl
They leave off when they have quenched
their thirst" Paddy-.'Yes. yer riv'-
renee; but did the beasts ever come
across a strand whisky"
An English engineer was trying to
explain the electric telegraph to a Per-
sian governor. Finally he said. ''Im-
agine n dog with his tail in Teheran
and his muzzle in London. Tread OH
his tail and he will bark there"
When II party OF gentlemen and
ladies were climbing TO the top Of a
high church tower one hot day a gen.
tleman remarked, '.This is a rather
n spiral flight Of steps" To which a
lady rejoined, Eyes. perspiral," and
she wiped her brow as she spoke.
The following composition has bsen
turned out by an American soldier aged
nine years: "A boy without q father
is a norphan, without a mother Is n
double norphan, but is often without
q grandfather or a grandmother and
then he is a norphanist."
At an infant Sunday school the teach
er gave the Bible story Of the "Prodi-
gal Son." When he came TO the place
where the poor ragged son reached his
former home, and his father saw him a
great way on" inquired what his
father did. One Of the smallest boys,
with his FIST clinched, said: II dunno,
but l dessay he set the dog on him."
A beautiful young lady, the daughter
Of Alderman Dellet, of Lancaster, the
other night, threw her arm around the
waist Of a lady friend, and q pair Of
scissors hanging therefrom severed an
artery in her arm and she nearly bled
to death. The accident should teach
young ladies that throwing arms around
the female waist, Is n dangerous piece
Of business that should be performed
solely by the male sex The latter are
strong and brave, and don't mind hav-
ing an artery severed now and then for