The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1880-04-23
THE "JINERs."
why She Wanted a Divorce.

She was about forty 1--WE years old, well
dressed, had black hair, rather thin and
hinged with gray, thin visaged and eyes
in which CLEANED the fires of an uncon-
1uerable spirit. She walked into Ster-
ry & Sedgwick's Office in Plumb's build
ing and satisfying herself that no one
was listening at the key hole, said sol
EMMY and impressively to Mr.. Sedg-
wick, Il want divorce"
What fors supposed you had one
of the best of husbands" said he.
Il 'spose that's what every body thinks
but if they knew what I've suffered in
ten years, they'd wonder l hadn't scalded
him long ago. ought to, but for the
sake of the young ones, I've borne it and
said nothing. I've told him, though,
what he might depend on, and now the
time comes, 1 won't stand il, young ones
or no young ones. I'll have divorce,
and if the neighbors want to blab them
selves hoarse about it, they can, for l
won't stand It another day"
But what's the matter: Don't your
husband provide for you: Don't he
treat you kindly?" pursued the lawyer.
ave get victuals enough, and don't
know but he's as kind and true as men
IN general, and he's never knocked none
of us down. l wish he had. Then I'd
get him into Jail, and know where he was
at night" retorted the woman.
Then what's your complaint against
him?"
"Well, if you must know he's one of
them plaguey iiners."
"a what?'
"A jiner; one of them pesky fools
that's always jining something. There
can't nothing come along tn ats dark and
sly and hidden, but he'll jine it. If any
body should get up society TO burn his
house down he'd iine 1t just as soon as
he could get in. and if they had to pay to
get in he'd go all the sooner. We hadn't
been married more than two months be-
fore he jined the Know Nothings We
lived on a farm then, and every Saturday
night he'd come tearin' in before supper
and grab fist fall of doughnuts and go
off gnawing 'em, and that's the
last I'd see of him till mornin'.
And every other night in the week
he'd roll and tumble in his sleep,
and holler Put none but Americans on
guard" - George Washington. And
rainy days he'd go out in the corn barn
and job at picture of the pope with IN
old bayonet that was there. l ought tc
have put my foot down then, but he fool
ed me with so many lies about the pope's
coming to make all the Yankee girl:
marry Irishmen and to eat up all the ba
bies that wasn't born with 4 cross on
their foreheads, that let him go on anC
encouraged him in it. Then he Joined
the Masons-perhaps you know wha
them be, but | don't, 'cep they tninl
they're the same kind of critters tina
built Solomon's temple, and took care o
his concubines, and all of that darnet
nonsence and CAB about worshipful mas
tiers, and squares, and cOmpasses an'
SIGH like, that we had in the house til
next six months YOU never see the beal
| anu he never OulSIOMCO II " no
do you think of man, Squire, that'l
dress hisself in white apron, bout bi
enough for a monkeys bib, aud go marcel
ing up and down making motion
and talking the foolishest lingo at pie
ture of George Washington in a gree
Jacket and truss on his stomach
Amt he a lconeytick: Well, that
my Sam, an stood it as long as II
goin' to. The next lunge the fool mad
was into the Odd Fellows. l made
warm for him whanShe came home an
told me that he'd jined them; but h
, kinder pacified me by telling me Thu
D they had sort of a branch show thi
! took women, and he'd get me in soon {
5 he found out how to do it. Well, OF
:. night he came home and said I'd bee
f proposed, and somebody had black-ball6
: me. Did it his self of course. Didn
want me round, knowing to his g
ings on OF course he didn't, and
= told him so Then he joined the Sol
- of Malta. Didn't say nothing to n
!, about it, but sneakcd off one night, pc
tendIn' he'd got to sit up with sick o
Teller, and I'd never found it out only
- come home looking like man that h:
" been through u thrashing machine, al
'e | wouldn't do thing for him till
}" owned up. And 50 its gone from bad
wus, and from wus to wusser, jlnin' til
p that and tother, till he's Worship
II minister of the Masons, and goddess
ut hope of the Odd Fellers, and swo
il swafiower of the Finnigans, and virg
IN cereus of the Grange and graz
mogul of the Sons of IndOlen
es and two edged tomahawk of the Unit
~ States of black men, and tale-bearer
le the merciful manikins, and skipper
II the guild of Catherine Columbus, a
X big wizard of the Arabian Knigh
pledge. passer of the reform club, CHI
of bulger of the Irish machinlsts, gra
:, cyclope of the Egyptian monkeys, a
N purse keeper of the order of Canadi
:; conscience, and double barreled dictat
:. of the knights of the brass circles, a
no standard bearer of the royal archangt
al and sublime porte of onion league, a
chambermaid of the celestial churre
a, and puisant pOtentate of the petrif
In pig stickers, and Lord only knows wi
aL else. I've borne it, and borne it, hoping
IL get lem all jined after while, but ia
"A no use, and when he came home
ms night and told me he'd got into a IL
he one. and been made grand guide of
NO. Nights of Honor, told him I'd a.
no and l will"
Here Mr.. Sedgwick interrupted, S
of ing: well, your husband is pre-
va we'll initiated that's a fact; but the CO
for will hardly call that good cause for
is vorce. The most of the societies '
lSSS mention are composed of honorable m
he and have excellent regulations. Nj
of them though called lodges are re
Ill associations, and mutual insurance c.
. .in panies, which, if your husband shO
ZEN die, would take care of you, and VIII
the would not see you or him suffer if
pa were sick"
-, "See me suffer when I'm sick! 7
TN care of me when he's deadl Wei
md guess not; can take care of my
ses when he's dead; and if can't can
~; another There's plenty Of EN-
on. they needn't bother themselves when
Tor sick, either. If l want to be sick
as suffer, its none of their business espeC
W w after all the sufferin' I've had whit
hat amt sick, because of their Carvings
in And you needn't try and make me
lnd lieve its all right, either know v
;T 20 it is to live with man that jines so
ing nv lodges that he don't never lodg
at home, and signs his name W
-. g.. Gill. NJ II L a a u