Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1880-03-04
VARIETIES.

don't fancy work.
"A compositor makes money hand
over fist. PbiLadeJphiG SUNDAY Item.
"A fellow can't dig CLANS without
moving mussel. Cincinnati CONNER
cEGZ.
-" Neither married nor SINGLE" is
the way they class widowers in Maine.
Free Press.
Ill habits gather by unseen degrees.
AS brooks make rivers, rivers run to
seas.-DTyden.
And now Boston physician says
that long walks before breakfast bring
on dyspepsia.
The person who retires with the
sun must have a warm bed-fellow.-
Rochester EDpreSS.
Anybody can give advice. Taking
it is the difficult part of the jOb.-Ne1O
Orleans PicGyasne.
You can telegraph all the way to
Cape Town, South Africa, now, but it
costs $2.373 a word.
The ague tackles a man with a
hearty "Shake, old boy; glad to see
you."-NeaO Orleans Pjcayu7se.
Idiot fringe will be the faYorite
style of hair dressing among our most
advanced swells this summer.
When you make note of hand,
write only on one side of the paper.
Leave the other side for the indorser.-
Free Press.
An invisible hair-net is not invisi-
BILE by long shot when carried along
the street on young mans coat-but-
ton. Free Press.
-"I rise for information" said a
member of a legislative body. 81 am
very glad to hear it, said bystander,
emo man wants it more"
Dryden wrote that half the good
feeling in giving was in the keeping still
about it, but there were only a few
newspapers in those days.
"A young man at Canton, Ohio, has
sued his own mother for $4,000 for
slander She circulated report that
he was drunken and thieVish.
In former times offenders against
the law were put into the stocks; now
adays it is first stocks and then law
breaking. Boston Transcript.
There is nothing more disgraceful
than that an old man should have moth
ing to produce, as a proof that he has
lived long, except his years.-Se@ecG.
1T is said titles can be bought
obvOoJ FO. Fro,,o opo b,odroI +O ivo
hundred dollars. The NOrristown Her.
aid says this doesn't include the title of
gentleman.
-" What woman can do" is the
title of an article in an exchange, but |
what we want to know is, what wom-
an can't do when she makes up her
mind.-N Y. Ma5J.
-Forney's Progress copies the fol-
lowing epitaph from tomb near Yer
sailles: " Except in 1859, during which
for several days she took lessons on the
piano, her life was without STAIN"
According to statistics lately pub
lished by the Health Department of
New York City, it appears that Burling-
ton, Ia, is the healthlest city in the
United States; Stockton, CAL, stands
next.
To have the bride stand under
floral horse shoe, and each usher wear
a tiny one on the lapel of his coat, in
stead of the old fashioned bOUtOpDiere,
is the newest development in the horse
shoe mania. ....
The happiness of your life depends
upon the quality of your thoughts;
therefore guard accordingly, and take
care that you entertain no notions un-
suitable to virtue and reasonable nature.
-MGrcuS AntOni@S.
On fiat in Chincoteague Bay there
is now goose-roost upon which half
million wild geese pass the night They
seek the island shortly after dusk and
remain until daylight, cackling SO
shrilly and continually that the fisher
men ON the shore find it difficult to
sleep.
"A New York inventor claims to
have discovered a process for making
all fabrics waterproof; but what is more
needed is an invention to make milk
cans waterproof Or the COW. We
believe it has never been definitely set
tied whether the water leaks through
the COW or the can. .-NOrriStOaOm Herald.
Famine and diphtheria are destroy
ing Russians in the interior of the EN-
pire, but the fate of millions of the poor
and obscure does not enlist the sympa-
thies of the world. 1t takes the sor-
rows of an Imperial household to move
the eloquence of historians and draw
tears by Telegraph OjncinnGti Com
171erciGJ.
AS Mr.. James Russell Lowell now
holds our most important foreign mis-
sion the following lines from the Big
low Papers, are quoted to show his
earlier views on the subject:
81 du believe tits wis an good
Tu send out furrin missions,
That is on sartin understood t
An orthodox conditions
Imean nine thousand dolls. per ann,
Nine thousand more for outfit,
AM me to recommend man S
The place would just about fit" c
The DeadwOod Pioneer, a copy of t
which is before us, says: " In the Black t
Hills two hundred young women could 8
ind remunerative employment as serv- t
ants. The trouble, though, has been
that in a population such as ours, where v
here are ten men to one woman, it is h