The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1880-03-30

observing the only day in the year that can
properly be called their own. .-RochtGnd
Courier.
? Sh-sh. man. sdon't give yourself away.
The MAJ VIII, will wait two hours for
bis girl to friz her hair to go riding with
him. will swear awfuly if his wife keeps
him waiting thirty seconds to fasten up
stray braid with a hairpfn. = Whitehall
Times.
The balance of trade last week was
largely against US Elnaird Gazette.
Yes, the new clerk 10 the grocery store,
blast him. mixed the scinnamon and the
pepper together. and threw more coal-dust
10 the brown sugar. The balance of trade
was indeed, greatly against US.
The govt is brake which a wise Prov
idence puts on mans legs when he is
living too FAST Baltimore Neaos. Non
sense. It's simply to give the young doc
tors a chance to earn something -Neto
York Express, This Express rap on the
legs should make the Baltimore Neaos
wish it had not stolen the para graph from
the Picoyune N 0. PIC
THE pain caused by the sting of an
insect is the. result of certain amount Of
acid poison injected into the blood, says a
physician. We always thought SO. Then,
reader. when you see an insect coming at
a 2:39 gait to bite you. stamp the acid
poison outof his system and let him go
ahead A rolling pin is handy thing to
carry for this purpose.
Queer, But It's True.
A man in a sleeping car. made great
grooming with his nose, when asleep, and
the man 10 the next berth. in the interest
of peace and quiet, got up and kicked the
offender. and it took four hours for the
conductor to get the car quiet again, and
the man sho took so much trouble for the
sake of quiet made IN enemy OF every pas
senger on board.-Boston Post.
HsI Would Have Something.
Father. said boy. of some fifteen
springs. ''all the fellers We got bicycles,
and mother says she guesses you III get me
one. IF only had one, l wouldn't ask for
a cent for anything, nd I'd split all the
wood, md shovel all the paths, nd do all
the arrants, nd" Its no use, my son !;
I'm not able to buy you bicycle. l.
I'VE then, wont you buy me base
bal2" Again the paternal veto. But
that boy even then, was not utterly cast
down. No; the last seen of of him he
was sbeeging his mother for an empty
mustard pot, to make DEVILS fiddle. -
Boston Transcript.
An Amusing Incident.
A rather amusing incident is told as
having occurred recently at church in
Connecticut, not many miles from Fair
field. The clergyman, it would appear.
desired to call the attention of his congre.
CATION to the fact that, it being the last
sunday 10 the month,he would administer
the rite of baptism to children. Previous
to his having entered the pulpit he had
received from one of his elders, who, by
the way. was quite deaf, notice to the
effect that as the children would be pres
ent that afternoon, and be had the new
Sunday school books ready for distribution,
he would have them there 10 sell to all
who desired them. After the sermon the
clergyman began the notice Of the bap-
tismal service, thus: All of those having
children and desiring to have them baptis
ed will bring them this afternoon. AT this
point the deaf elder, hearing the mention
of children, supposed it was something 10
reference to his books, and rising, said:
"And all of those having none and desir-
ing them, will be supplied by me for the
sum Of twenty-five centsI'