Daily Republican., 1880-06-15

Marriage Rehearsal.
NJ 81 have BEEN a subscriber for ii
o last ten years." said q "broke-up
d looking young man coming into TIL
Q Office yesterday, and sitting down 1
: front Of the managing editor, "aud
call upon you for aid and assistance.
The editor looked, polluted at tn
clock, and asked what he could do 70
, the visitor.
"Why, I want to hold up to the pull
lie scorn and detestation, fellow calle
Mooney, and mean, red-headed gin
named Morrissev."
"Scandal case, eh ?"
| "a heap sight worse. You see,
was engaged to be married to that cir
her names Maria-and DR.. Ston
was to hitch US up the first Of tn,
month, 80 l asked this mean GUS
Mooney, to be groomsman.
ale consented, Of ooursei"
"You bet he did. You see Mooney
has dig black mustache and-and al
that; and he's a good deal of a masher
as 1t were. He said he would try Il
make it lively and pleasant for the
bridesmaids.
! "And did her"
"Why, he actually made love to all
four. Got the other groosmen furious
by flirting with the whole lot. Told 'em
1t was the correct thing in Europe for
The groomsmen to kiss the bridesmaids
al around before and after the cers-
mony, and that theV ought to meet and
practice to get the thing in good run
ming order"
"Did they practicel" said the editor,
laying down his pen.
"Did theyH Why, it was just dis
gustirg the way they went on every
evening. To see that villain Mooney
pretend to steer down the aisle and
back up against the chanosl rail, and
then when tho mock service was over,
kiss and paw around tho girls, would
have made your hair raise q foot. Why
he did begin flirting with my Maria-I
mean that Morrissey girl"
"Made love to the bride, eh ?"
"Exactly; and she a-letting him do
it--mind you. Well, yesterday they
said they we're going to have a fine re-
hearsal that night, and to make the
thing more perfect, they intended to
get Bings, the young divinity student,
to read the service. And as was going
over to Oakland with load OF furniture
for our new house Mooney said he
would ofhoiate in my place."
"That was kind Of him."
"But wait minute. When l got
back and called at Maria's house about
IL p. M, | found all the party sitting
round the parlor and looking very
serious, except the bride, who seemed
kinder frightened. "What is the
trouble :" said l; "what's happened I"
SWELL, the fact is, said that cheeky
"There's the most singular
accident, the queerest mistake you ever
heard of in your life. You see, we
we're rehearsing the service, as usual,
and was a-holdiHg Maria's hand just
ike this, when young Bings got sorter
lbsant-mlnded, 80 to speak, and the
irst thing we knew he pronounced us
nan and wife in the regular form, and
ls now says we are married in real
'arnest. Too bad, isn't it ?" |,
singular mistake" said the editor. .
"But the worst of 1t was the way
hat false-hearted hussy tool it. She
aid 1t was pretty hard, but what s
ouldn't bs cured must be endured, .
nd that she supposed they couldn't
ct divorce under year, anyhow, .
ot Of stuff like that" i.
"Peared resigned to her fate, as 1t
Tere." :
"Bxactly and then Mooney Clipped .
q with lot Of stuff about not crying
YER split milk, and he said he'd take D
he furniture off nay hands, and pay for .
he ring. Said hs'd give his note for y
I'm. Cheekf Why, that man has got !,
lore gall than pawnbroBer's clerk, y
nd want you, Mr.. Editor, to show
i'm and his red-headed, big-footed wife
P the very worst way. Accident in
eed! Why. its the plsinest put up
ID l ever saw in the whole course Of n
y life. Just let 'em have 1t in Italics, q,
you please, and I'll take 500 extra i,
,pies |" I,
The editor said he'd attend to 1t, and lc
% since written to Mr.. Mooney to say o,
lat position as reporter was always m
'sn 10 him on his 60 ahead journal. o,
tx. "a