The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1880-09-23
The Fare.
The Fare.
We have received the following letter,
which we print ''cer6otsm. ct Hte''1tum, ct

Inc Fare.
| We have received the following letter,
which we print .'ver6atim, ct hteratum, ct
punctudtens:
BIRCH CooLE, Sept. II. $780,
lMishter Edeter Of the Gazet-YER HON.
Err: wint over to Redwood Falls to see
if Bishop Gorden would take me whole
crop and let me have a selfbinder, God
OHara's saloon to get me nip of ould
irish whiskey. Mike O'Hara is a gintle-
man-ivery inch of him. Mike tould me
to rade the big paper on the wall-all
about the Fare. What read was Ii
csnce not to sell any whiskcy on Sunday
and not to kape open after II o'clock at
night, and l said to Mike, be gorra, it
isn't fare at all, at all. Och! says Mike,
you blathcrskite, it isn't the Lisence, it's
the advertisement about the Fare I'm
after having you rade. Mishter Edetcr, l
tried to rade the advertisement about the
Fare, but be jabers don't think it was
fare either, for l couldent tell what it
meant. sir; and I'm writing you this lethcr
to have you explain in your paper all
about it for the good of me children and
their ancestors. The advertisement says
there will be "Citizens Purses at the
Fair" Mishter Edeter is this an adver.
tisement to all of the pickpockets to come
to Redwood Falls? I am tould that Red
wood Falls was high moral Town. until
they began to be after hanging people to
collect their store debts, and that now
the byes take the town livery night, and
that the saloon keepers have policeman
that they pay to make the village cOunsil
let the byes alone? Mishter Edeter, if we
go to the Fare must we take our shela-
lies with US!
The advertisement says, Sweepstakes
free to all divided" Mr. Edeter L don't
know what sweepstakes dirided names
The advertisement says, ''Free to horses
owned in Redwood and Rcnville counties
divided" Mishter Edeter, have mare
81 years ould. 1 would take her to the
Fare, but l don't want the Ould mare
dtctded. The advertisement says, Run
ming free for all: best two in three, half
mile heats, divided" Mishter Edetcr, l
have been running from me crcdeters in
Renvillc county the divil knows how long.
l can bate livery mothers son of them
half mile hates or hole mile hates. But
| don't know about the dirided, Is the
half mile hates to be divided, or is the
best two in three to be DIVIDED, or faith
are all of us to be dicideds Bridget saws
if it names all of us l shan't 20 to the
Fare. The advertisement says the Far.
mers of Redwood and adjoining counties
are invited to place the various products
of their farms on exhibition" Mishter
Edeter, the cat has five kittens, the dog
he has six pups, the SOW has fifteen pigs,
the cow has twin calf. and by the help
of the blessed Virgin we have razed 700
bushels of wheat, 800 bushels of oats,
1900 bushels of corn and 800 bushels of
barley, besides Bridget has been breeding
wild geese, muskrats and hunting dogs.
Must we bring all the various products of
the farm to the Fare? The advertisement
says, Hay will be furnished free to all
stock" Mishter Edeter, the ould mare
laughed when tould her she incident pay
for her hay. The advertisement saws,
1.-THE advantages of having an association
in our midst affords the farmer an oppor-
tunity of comparing notes with his neigh
bors.' Misther Edeter, Bridget says she
don't want an association in our midst" :"
My notes bridget owns the farm and has
no notes. are all in the hands of the ma
chine men. If the association faith will
tell me how to get hould of them, I will
bring them to the Fare along with the
various products" and compare them
with me neighbors. We don't know what
the association in our midst wants with
them unless it is to show 1.-THE practical
results of well-directed toll. The adver-
tisement says, 1.-The laboring man, me-
chanic, merchant and business man who
nerer rests finds his life monotonous one. :"
Mishter Edeter. what is monotonous
one" Will the association kape it in a
side show along with the giascutus? Will
Bridget have to pay anything to see it.?
Does it belong to the association in our
midst| l asked Mike O'Raherty and ev-
cry one in Birch Coole how man who
necer rests gets to be s'monotonous one, !"
and divil u one could tell me. The ad-
vertisement says, I'VE would say to one
and all, rest day or two, come to the
Redwood county fair" Mishter Edeter,
we are threshing; can't we come to the
fare without resting day or two? The
advertisement says, bring your wives
and daughters with you, and if you don't
have good time it will not be the fault
OF the managers of this association" I"
Now, Mishter Edetcr, l don't know
whether to come or not. have only one
wife-that's Bridget, and me daughters
are the baby, and SHE Is a bye Bridget
wont let me go to Salt Lake City because
she don't want ME to have any more
wives. But if you will explain the ad-
vertisement of the Association in our
midst" l will take Bridget to the Red
wood county Fare to compare notes, :"
and then | can have as many wives as
want, and have a good time. M1sHrER
EDETER-tell us what the advertisement
names, and we will come to the Fare and
bring all the various products with us.
Your obadient sarvent,
PAT GRANGER