The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1880-09-09
PASSING SMILES.

The best trained team OF oxen gangs
aft a-gee.
a cHIEL amang ye takin' notes.
the pick-pocket.
TALK of there being no women cam
bals. Think of the poet laureate.
TIE good mother and the accessible
slipper always make spanking team.
The Indians are ready to bury the
Ratchet whenever the agents will give
them gun.
CIRCUMSTANCE alter cases." said the
unsuccessful lawyer, "but my case don't
alter my circumstances.
The hired girl who was called up at4
clock in the morning thinks arose TWO
hours later would sound quite as sweet
The Omaha Herald says drink OF
Coun ell Bluffs whisky will make a man
90 off to some secluded spot and rob
himself.
GEORGE: Yes, hanging is capital
punishment, especially when you're
hanging on some good looking girls
arm.
AN Illinois girls toast: "The young
men of America-their arms our sup
porters, our arms their reward; fall in,
men, fall in"
DEADwooD obituaries state that . the
deceased was of an unobtrusivc nature"
when he didn't poke into more than
three fights week.
EMMA: The only point of resemblance
between flowers and women, that we
are aware of, is that they both shut up
when they sleep.
THE Arab horse is not broken until his
fourth year. that's why they differ
from teacups. But then Arab horses
are not washed by the average kitchen
girl,
THE Norrlstown Herald asks, care
the great men weakening%' Not any
weakening. Somebody has been lying
about u.s. BY the way, Willis how
do you think you feel?-Pscks Sun.
CAN'T that lovely critter, JohnH
said Jerusha, as they stopped opposite a
leopards cage. "Waal, yes" said John,
"but then he's drefully freckled, amt
hep
IT is believed that cats can bs made
tender hearted by playing soft, sad
music TO them, but how much easier IL
is to hire q boy to chuck 'em off the
bridge.-DetoH Free Press.
PHYSICIAN to government clerk
"Well what do you CONF Jain of?' G.
c." Sleeplessncss, doctor" Physician
-"At what time do you go to bed2' G.
c. "Oh, | don't mean at night, but
during Office hours!"
A LADY subscriber writes poem for
our paper which Tor private reasons we
must decline. She says: "The sun
shine is stealing my youth and beauty
away" Why don't you begin an
action for petty larceny, you goose, you.
"WHY don't you come in out of the
rain?" said good natured dominic to q
ragged Irishman. "Sure it's av no con-
sequence, yer riverence,' returned Pat:
"mc clothes is so full of holes they won't
hold water
A SouTHERN paper quotes gentle
man of the colored persuasion as saying
"No, parson, probly'll never git cour-
age to jne dc church. When poor
darkey's spiritual wiser takes him down
in the ribcr and says q capsize thee and
then ducks him under, it's time dat
darkey looks after hisself. You dom
play none OBJ dem games on me, OLD
man."
49, THERE is n man In our town,
And he is wondrous wise
Whenever he writes the printer man
He dotteth all his is.
Toledo Con mrc.rL
Aud when he's dotted all Of them
With great sang fToid and ease
He punciuates each paragraph.
And crosses all hsts.
--Nep Hater Register
Upon one side alone he writes,
And never rolls his leaves;
, And from the men of ink smile,
And marks "insert' receives
cincinnati Commercial
And when question he doth ask
, Taught wisely he hath been,)
He doth the goodiy three-cent stamp,
For postage back, put In.
A YANKEE came running down to
. pier Just asa steamer was starting. TIL
; boat moved off some four or five yards
as he took jump, and coming down OF
the back of his head on the deck, h,
, lay stunned for two or three minutes
When he came to the steamer had gOn'
4 the best part of quarter of mile, and
e raising his head and looking to the shor
U the Yankee said: Great Jehosaphat
: whata jump"
! CATER ALL" remarked the sam
= young man, skimming lightly over tn
! the gravel walk in the general directio
:. of the front gate, latter all, what boot
= itT And the muscular looking oil
!. gentleman at the top of the porch, wit
- his spectacles jostled little crooked
" said that if the young man himself didn'
y know, he didn't know anybody in tina
3 township that did. - Eurin0fon H1pkeu