Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1880-03-28
FACTS AND EANC[ES
SATURDAY is wash-day all over Il

STA.
AN appeal to the understanding
"Wipe your feet"
WRITs of error-Love letters to an.
other mans wife.
THE pin is mightier than the sward
You can sit on the sward with impunity
| NoKIssING by telephone for us. We
prefer to take the electricity direct from
the battery.
In most of the States elections are
held the third day Of the week because
it is chooseday.
A NEW book, like a fresh lobster
doesn't benefit man much until it is
red and digested.
SPICEI says his collar-button is like
the celebration of the Fourth of July
it is sure to come of.
SCORES of thousands of camels are
killed by over-exertion and starvation
in every campaign in India.
| HALF citizens time in the coun-
tries of the Old World is taken up in
learning how to be soldier.
| VICTOR HUGO says that love gives him
perspicuity. In this country it gener-
ally sets man to buying dresses.
THIS is the latest for wedding invita-
tons: "Come around and see us capt
ure a mother-in-law, at 8 o'clock,
sharp"
WITHOUT saying which one does the
hugging, Miss Muloch says bear and
| forbear are the two great bears of mat
rimony.
THERE are pianists so expert in varia-
tons that they can play all around a
melody or an old air without ever hit
ting it once.
No PERSON will be admitted to the
cat show before being searched, to see
that he has not boot-iack concealed
about hin.-Bosto1a Post.
EMINENT German statisticials calcu-
late that the amount of money spent in
railroads since the invention of the loco
motive reaches the vast sum of $15,-
O00,0OO,000.
AN auctioneer was endeavoring to sell
fowling-pi and, failing to get
bid, bystander, who had read the pa
pers, said: BLOW in the muzzle, and
it will GO Off"
A CALIFORNIA counterfeiter put the
officers on track of chap who had $25
in bogus coin about him, and then made
his own escape with over $4,000 of the
stuff in sachel
"YoU just take bottle of my medi-
cine," said a quack doctor to a con-
sumptiye, and you'll never cough
again" "Is it SO fatal as that?" gasped
the consumptive.
How IS it, in fashionable weddings,
that we always have a catalogue of the
brides wearing apparel, while we never
hear Of the groom having so much as a
new pair of socks.
A NOTICE in Western newspaper of
steamboat explosion ends as follows:
"The Captain swan ashore. So did the
chambermaid; she was insured for
5000, and loaded with iron"
A PE1LADEIP HIA newspaper describes
the Edison lall as "the size of lady's
fist" which is about as definite as
certain recipe, in which one of the in
gradients was "as big as piece of chalk"
as IT possible, miss, that you do not
know the names of some of your best
friends?" inquired a gentleman of
lady. Certainly" size replied; II don't
even knew what my own will be year
hence"
DID it ever occur to you why law
yer who is conducting disputed-will
case is Ike trapeze performer in cir
Gus? Didn't? Well, it's because he
flies through the heir with the greatest
of fees.
INDIGNANT wife-"If I had known
you were coming home in this condi-
ton, should have gone home to my
fathers" Inebriated husband "Hic-
would you? I'm awf sorry didn't shend
you word-hic."
The system by double entry. origi-
nally called Italian bookkeeping, was
taken from the course of algebra which
was published by Burgo, at Venice, in
the fifteenth century. It was made
known in England by James Peele, in
1869.
A SHIRT has two arms, just as panta-
looms have two legs. Yet one is called
a pair and the others only one. Isn't
it time that we let up on astronomy and
paid more attention to the everyday
tEiucS Ulut NcA Vic ClSd1SSG 1i1do
BOY once t'ok it in his head
That he would exercise his sled.
He TOOK that sled into tile road
And. lord massy! how he sIode.
and as h slid. lie iaUgilns cried.
What fun upon ny sled to slide
And as he laughed. before le hlawed,
lie from that sliding Sled w&s slu6e.
Upon the slab where lie was laid
They carved this line: This boy was slade"
-Eansas City Times.
OF what sort Of stuff are burglars
made? The wife of one has been beg.
ging New York Judge to save her son
from the influences with which her hus-
bands calling has surrounded the boy.
Anywhere but among the burglars such
man would appear to be worse than
brute.
IT was written, "Her dainty feet we're
incased in shoes that might have been
taken for fairy boots," but the compost
tor made it to read, @Her dirty feet were
incased il shoes that might have been
taken for ferryboats," and he is no
longer dweller in Chicago, but fugi-
tive in the land.
TWIN brothers at Evergreen, Ala,
we're not only alike in looks, but so
equal in strength that wrestling match
was arranged as test. This did not
settle the matter, however, for one was
thrown on his head and killed at the