, 1880-01-18
SUDDEN: CONVERSION,

SttU 10fk IFnf3,
Master Jaggars, Of: North Merilen, Conn.
latelydeyjsed awftlg Ingenious and entirely novel
scheme for arresting the flow Of American
COPPER coins toward the: heather pockets of
Juvenile India Some two months since Mis-
ter Jaggars, who had painfully accumulated
the sum Of IS cents, with a view to al, ex-
pected circus, was compelled to consecrate
is cents to the hated small boys of India.
It was this last Of a long series Of pecuniary
outrages that determined him to take q bold
stand against missionary assessments,
and he, therefore, summoned mass
meeting of small boys ON Saturday afternoon
at Deacon Pratt's. barn, ostensibly with
view to rats, but really in order to propose a
plan Of defense against heather encroach-
ments, Master Jaggars made a moving
speech, In which he glowingly described the
luxury in which the heathen small bov wal
lows: "He amt washed, and he can wear
lust as little cloze as heser1ninter. There
amt no school for him, nor no Sunday, you
bet. He can go swimmin' every day, and
can lust lay off on the bank and see
the crocodiles scoop in washerwomen and
such. Then his backyard is chuck full Of
tigers and hipopotamuses, and no end of
snakes, and he can steal his dads gun and
shoot 'em out Of the back window. This is
the chap that rakes In all our money, and
sayits more'n we ought to stand. Now
move that we all turn heathen ourselves.
Tie folks can't make us wash and 20 to
school If we're henthen, and all the other
boys will have to put up their money for u.s."
It Is needless to say that this speech was re-
Of execration went up as the 1uxuries Of
the hated heather were described, and the
proposal to adopt heathenism as profession
was unanimously supported: A slight tenn
porary opposition was manifested BY Master
comet come heathen they must first have the their p eyes yes
nut out,-a theory which was based upon a
INSTRUMENTATION Of the hymn which speaks
Of Is the heather in his blindness" The OBJ
jector, however, was soon convinced Of his
sire to become lleathen.: The details Of the
scheme were all arranged by Master jag
gars. A plaster bust of Mr.. S. j.
Tilden was decided to be ugly
enough to serve as an idol, \and the
in the barn. and bowed down to 1t with much
gravity. They discarded all their clothing,
except towel twisted around the waist, and
blackened their entire bodies with burnt
cork. There could. be no doubt that they
and, as It was late in The afternoon, they re-
solved to spend the night In the barn, to
breakfast on the spoi1s of Deacon Pratt's
orchard, and to attend Sunday-school in Il
body, in order to collect tribute from
opened US usual the next morning. al
though the absence Of eleven boys
created 9 good deal of remark.
Soon after the exercises, had begun, the
teachers were astonished at the entrance Of
Master Jaggars and his ten associate heathen.
It is only fair to say that the lleathen behaved
themselves with as much propriety Us their
professional duties would permit. Master
Jaggars advanced to the SUPERINTENDENT and
remarked: If you please, sir, we've all
turned heathen. There amt no foolin'
about it.. We've got a first-class old idol,
and we don't believe in nothing. no.
more So, if you please, sir, will you.please
tell them Christian boys to fork over half of
all the money they've got, and to remember
how blessed it is to consecrate it to real,
genuine heathen?n There is no instance
on record in which a heathen has been con-
yerted as quickly as was Master Jaggars.
The Superintendent held him by one
ear, and at the tenth stroke of the
cane Master Jaggars renounced his heathen-
ism, and promised to smash his idol and re-
turn to the Christian faith without a mo-
ment's delay. The other heather, alarmed
by the fate Of their leader, fled to the barn,
washed themselves, resumed their clothing,
and went homeward> with sober counte-
llances. singing missionary hymns. The
North Meriden revival Of heathenism was a
disastrous faiIure, but nevertheless the bold
ness and originality of the scheme devised
By Master Jaggars must command our Won
der and admiration.