The Florida agriculturist. [volume] (DeLand, Fla.) 1878-1911, 1880-09-01
SEPTEMBER 1.
VARIE TIES.


Who carried silk umbrella:
There came typhOon
Which made it q balloon,
And floated her off with her fellow.
A woman, in choosing a lover,
considers good deal more how a
man will be regarded by other
women than whether she loves him
herself.
Wheni a book raises your spirit,
and inspires you with noble and
courageous feelings, seek for no
other rule to judge the work by; it
is good, and made by good work
man.-Bruyere.
Professor Swing says that a hat
won at rattle ''comes down over the
eyes Of the wearer's soul" If this
be the case, it is more than probable
that a pair OF ratified boots would
cover the wearer up to his spiritual
waist.
Happiness is like mama: it is to
be gathered in grains, and enjoyed
every day. 1t will not keep; it can
not be accumulated nor have we to
go out Of ourselves or into remote
places to gather it, since it has rained
down from heaven at our very doors,
or rather within them,
Two editors were seated side by
side at circus. A trapeze woman
was coming down the rope bottom
side up; slowly the rope wound
around her limbs and body so that
she scarcely moved "How gradu-
ally she comes down." said one edi
tor. YES" said the other, "just
like some Of my subscribers"
A young lady who is studying
French, lately wrote TO her parents
that she was invited to dejeuner
the day before: and was going to a
.tete chdDepetre the next day. The
professor OF the college was sur
prised to receive dispatch from the
'"old man" day oEtwo after say
ing: I'll yon don't keep my daugh-
ter away from these menagaries and
1rs1cie - s--<--.aiilil -s,,=a-
n see what ais her, PittS5urgh Iele-
graph.
> One afternoon there was crowd
= of excited colored men in an alley
: gathered around two negro boys
who had clinched each other and
were fighting away for dear lite on
the ground. There was one negro
man present and he urged the com
batants not to give up. "Gouge him
a in de eye, BILL" Sam, if you give
1t in I'll tan yer hide for yer" a well
l. dressed gentleman stopped and said
'e to the negro mau: You ought to
y be ashamed OF yourself to encourage
9r those boys to fight" "Why, Lor
e. boss" was the response, dem my
own children. "-Galvestoa Neaos.
GLOW is your son coming on ?
M "Oh, am having power OF trouble
-. ~ with him." whats the matter
~ ~, now 2" 'Well, you know, couldn'
~ send him to school. because, thanks
~ to Governor Roberts, there are M
W. W. tree schools, and 1 could not atfor'
~ to send HIM to a private school.
w Eyes, know that is So" 'Well,
~ sent him away out to the frontier
and as luck would have it he wa
convicted of horse stealing, and go
five years in the penitentairy." "Iha
~, was bad" mo, it wasn't, tor yo
"o see at the penitentlary he could lear
II trade and become a useful citizen.
no "Well that's good" 'No, it ain
OF for Governor Roberts has pardone
him out on account of his youth an
Let ionorance."- GalUest01e NeacS.
'nS The Rev. Henry Ward Beeche
nv some time since received a lett'
NC nc from young man, who recon
a uS, mended himself very highly as beln
+ honest, and closed with the reques
"Get me an easy situation, Tn;
honesty may be rewarded" l
which Mr.. Beecher replied "Dol
90 be an editor, if you would be 'eas.
ce Do not try the law. Avoid scho
Iix keeping. Keep out Of the pulpl
cht Let alone all ships, stores, shops al
5ok merchandise. Abhor politics. he
10 away from lawyers. Don't practl
ter medicine. Be not farmer nor
mn mechanic neither a soldier nor
,rlv sailor. Don't study. Don't thin
! ot Don't work. None off them are ea'
Iure Oh my honest friend, you are in
lour very hard world | know OF
1 ,,ae,,, nlaca in IT, That