The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1880-06-26
CREAM OF OUR EXCHANGES.

Irish bLttcr-Littlc pats.
Father and are out--Fred Grant
Very seldom 'round-The square man
A smooth borc--A life insurance agent
Window, of Winona, didn't have winning way.
H. hello here, Who's been saving my ooat'
j. Il. Il. .,,., ~
"Oh Jimmy, Jimmy, Wy vasn'tita suns+roke;
Wm. Il. C.-WOrtd.
Garfield is one OF the men you read about-lh
Cakes Amcs's note book.
The Ioafer is a labor-saying institution. -i""-
0lsonUillc Sentinel
Amateur florists may be called garden greens
--PhHG,ielphia Sunday Item.
George Francis Train has a villa at Newport,
but he says another villain occupies 1t.
Having travelled around the world Grant re-
turned TO take a trip up Salt River.
The good man says, GAN things are for the
best" and mentally adds, 81 am the best"
Truth smashed to earth will rise again, but the
Republl party fattcned out once might stay
Ast ,uis paper says spitefully, THE great
est Gu ,ity which Chicago has to show her visi.
tors is a piece Of unmortgagcd ground"
The Blaine mon nominated Garfield because he
il the nearest to the Blaine kind Of mcn.-Km-
dali Co. Record.
Just So Blaine took Arkansas railroad stocks
and Garfield Pacific stocks. Both took brides.
John shcrman's friends told the Chicago con
yeption that he would not take the nomination
with negro on for vice president. What II they
triad T. Inn with Eliza pinkstOut
The ghost Of Cakes Ames is again having an
uneasy time Of it, and the cock doesn't begin to
crow until November, either.
THAT grand old silent soldier" was very I'M
pressivc sentence, but the majority OF the con
yenton looked upon 1t as tally.
The uroprictur OF a Louisville bone factory an
pounces that persons leaving their bones with
him can have them ground at short notice.
She began too high. "Icn thousand" she
screechcd, and stopped. start her at five thou
eandm cried a converted stock broker present.
pretty actress settled her advertising bill
with a Little Rock newspaper last week by kiss
ing the editor Arkansas editors don't get very
rich, but they have heap of fun.
Authors are spoken OF as dwelling ia attics,
hpcauBc eOicW OF lHeul are dDic W IlNC Oi lhoil
srst story Boston Commercial bulletin.
The mule has met his match. 1t was III Della
ware lie kicked over beehive. He died the
next day The little bee is never too busy to de-
cline an invitation to fight.
Garfield is said to be poor man, his Ohio resi-
dence being worth only about s25,OW. For TINS
extreme poverty alone he Is certainly entitled to
the support OF the laboring classes bloomington
Had.
Young married man blowing, his wife hoe.
ing and his baby sleeping in the fence corner in
a crade, is what gentleman saw near liartwcll,
Ga. reeently.-No wonder Georgia is the richest
state in the south.
On the principle that men of the same trade
know each other, the opinion OF Belkpsr, Grants
Secretary of War, may be worth something lie
saws: "Garfeld is the most corrupt man in
America. and would steal Heavens livery to serve
the the devil in"
Tell me. We winds that round my pathway roar,
no Won not know some spot on earth where
The loud winds dwindled to whisper low,
And sighed for pity a. they answered, I'VE dus'
not know"
Olive Logan says: "Paris is the wickedest city
on the face of the earth" Directly after that she
says: at lie lovely place TO visit, either Tor
week or twelvemonth."
New York Grapaie: When old Mr.. Lamb the
confectoner, found his daughter Jerusha sam
Ming his sweetmeats, he exclaimed In anguish;
..ob Jerusba Lamb, Jerusbs Lamb. thou that
killest the profits"