The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1880-05-13
THE DOCTORS WATCHMAN.

"TeH you what, doctor; you'll be get
ting robbed and murdered one of these
days; you will, upon my word !"
Hardly, my boy. You ought to
know, by this time, that it's the province
of us doctors to kill other people, not to
be killed ourselves" And, with a thick
chuckle at his own wit, DIR. John Hunter
Bistoury settled himself comfortably in
his chair, and began to peel his third
orange as carefully as if he were taking
off limb.
When the doctor first came to New
York, thirty years before, he had been
in no way burdened with riches but
his face had proved his fortune in diff
ferent sense from that of the over-candid
milkmaid in the song. The mere sight
Of that round, forid, jovial visage, in
every crease of which a joke or a good
story seemed to be lurking, was cor
dial in itself, and appeared capable Of
reviving the most hopeless invalid with
out the aid of medicine at all. Mindful
of the human weakness which makes SO
many worthy people regard their own
ton, the lessening of which in any way
is direct insult to themselves, DR.. Bis
toury skillfully took middle course be-
tween alarming his patients, by an over
serious view of their case, and offending
them by appearing to make light of it.
In this way he had acquired an enor-
nous practice, and his reputation now
stood so high that the mere eclat of his
name had suficed to sell an entire edi-
ton Of his great work upon ''The Mu-
tUal Relations of Mind and Body" in
which he proved to his own satisfaction,
if not to that Of all his readers, that all
criminal impulses whatever, and indeed
the very existence of sin itself, are Who'll
ly due to "a morbid action of the physi-
Cal system that murder may be pre-
vented by the timely use of EPSON salts,
and an unbeliever converted by judi
cious contemplation of the virtues of
quinine.
Il can assure you, my dear Harry"
resumed the genial doctor, "that it's
amazing fattering to me to find myself
considered worth robbing at ALL No
thief would have thought me worth
center-bit in the days when your poor
father-as fine fellow, Harry, as ever
breathed-used to come and sup with
me upon biscuits and toasted cheese in
my little snuggery down town. And
then, as surely as the time came to go,
. he'd turn to me and say: - Now, Jack,
old boy, won't you think better of it,
and let me write you check just to
give you a fair start, you know?' But,
although | knew well enough that he'd
have been only too glad to do it, ] had
ito refuse for my motto is, Heaven
helps those who help themselves
ga motto which you'll find some
black-masked gentleman exemplifying in
this very house one of these nights,
growled Harry Everett. "Look here,
doctor, I'm not joking-Tm not, indeed.
Everybody knows you're rich man,
and it's got abroad that there's a room
in your house which is always shut up ;
the very thing to make people think
there must be something very valuable
slowed away there, and yet, after all that,
you go living in this big house without
a soul hear you except the cook and old
Sam yonder, who wouldn't be worth a
cent in real scrimmage
"Well, my boy, said the doctor, with
a curious smile; "would it tranquilize
your mind II were to engage night
watchman?"
"I should think 50. That would be
just the thing"
every good. Consider it done"
This room, of which Harry had spoken
as being 9 always shut up, was a stand
ing puzzle to the doctors few intimates.
Not man Of them had ever crossed its
threshold, and it's master, when ques-
toned on the subject, answered only by
some joking evasion. .Rumor whispered
that one adventurous gentleman, rem
dered desperate by his wife's threat to
give him no peace till he found out
what DR.. Bistoury kept hid in that
room of his, +" had actually attempted a
burglarious entrance; but the attempt,
if ever made, had been unsuccessful. 1t
is needless to say that countless conjec-
lures, and not a few heavy bets, likewise,
were being constantly made respecting
the contents of this Bluebeard chamber.
Many declared that the doctor had fitted
e H : nerro,s;,,ee +ha