Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1880-04-13
Matrimonial Clouds.
BY MRS. NJ. E. CARMICHAEL.

Matrimonial Clouds.
BY MRS. NJ. E. CARMICHAEL.
"Daniel Jackson, I don't want you to
20 to sleep yet, but just want you to
listen to me. And I want"
"Polly Ann, don't poster me with
your wants. You're always wanting.
Just like the women!"
swell, sir, whether want so many
things or not, one thing I know is, 1
don't get them. But that is neither here
nor there. I am going to talk to you, and
you need not go to sleep, for talk I shall,
until you have piece of my mind"
"Oh, Polly Ann, you have given me
80 many pieces of that wonderful mind
of yours, I should think it was all pieced
out, and not bit left" Il hope it is,
at any rate, for she beats the Jews when
she gets started.
"Indeed, cir, I have plenty left, as
you will find out. But I want to tell
you my opinion of your behavior lately.
How often have you said you never
think of the girls, and that you wonder
other men can? It don't seem so very
hard for you to do. I have caught you
looking sly at that pretty Sissy Samp-
son up in the choir, pretending you
wanted to see how many were there
singing. And the way she simpered
and turned red, showed she saw it, too.
Where's your manners, staring at young
girls? It encourages them to be bold.
and that is the last thing for you to teach
them. Then, there is that Janey But
Ter, little foolish giggler; Morning,
noon and night, she is giggling at every
hn1 oh 10 OF q
time, even in her sleep, and would gig
gle over her dead mother. What was
that you said? You shouldn't wonder,
being it's her step-mother.' Daniel
Jackson, my sister Catharine is step
mother, as you well know, and has for
twelve years been a faithful mother to
your brother Georges little Mary Louisa
and John Henry. But that's the way
with all widowers."
"Come, Polly Ann, George isn't say
ing a word. Don't ramble so. Your
way of dragging in things that don't
fit, is so foolish. Hush, and 60 to
sleepy"
II will not go to sleep, and I will not
hush, and I will talk. You needn't
change the subject. Janey Butler does
giggle. and you need not watch her So"
"Why, Polly, she is only cheerful,
and always looks so smiling. A man
cannot help but smile back again. Don't
be so touchy. Let the young folks en-
joy themselves. You was young once.
"a long while ago. And the bright,
pretty girls are enough to make any
mans lips twitch to kiss them. I'm
sure mine would often, if was not a
married man."
"Well, never heard such shameless
depravity. So unfaithful to me, too,
when I don't deserve it. You will
bring judgment on your head"
mo, Polly Ann, will not bring it,
for it is already brought, in your tongue.
If there is one cantankerous plague on
earth, 1t is to hammer at man, worry
ing his brains out of him, when he is
tired and sleepy. 1 shall go in the gar
ret to sleep, if you torment me in this
way. Your tongue is hung in the mid
die, and runs at both ends"
getting mad"
"And Daniel aside) if I had the
chance, I'd show the old woman q thing
or two, to pay her for this rampage"
"What are you mutteriDg about, Dan.
tel? Talk out like man. You told
Sarah Bacon was jealous of you. She
said so. And the way shut her up,
was a caution. Frying meddler Ri
diculous bosh! Ne jealous of shipper
ing, giddy girls, with hats back on theil
spines! Frizzled hair, all ribbons and
powder, with lazy white hands Tapping
like a kangaroo or prairie dog ! And
as for you to tell it to Sarah Bacon! II
I even was jealous, it is mean trick to
expose me. A man isn't half a man to
talk about his wife's faults even to his
relatives. And they never gain any
thing by it, is one comfort"
"Oh, Polly Ann, you can't take bit
lof fun. And your fussing reminds me Of
a humble bee."
:. swell, sir, if I was humble bee"
would sting you in the eye, So you could
not look at the girls. And you need moi
flap the bed clothes 80. 1t is no use to
get mad, for you cannot 60 on in your
sin and go UNPUBLISHED. Those pretty
girls wouldn't marry such an old fox
ike you, if you were rid of me-"
s "Why, Polly Ann, the girls are doing
that every day, and the younger the
girl the older the man they often mar
swell, the poor things are hoodwink.
ed by the old ounces, and that's the
way they are caught. But it's none of
your business about the whole matter.
Only to keep your eyes to yourself in
church, or on the preacher, or on me- "
Goodness gracious, Polly Ann, do
give your tongue holiday. 1t must be
awful tired, and needs rest as much as
my head. What is the use of working
yourself into a passion, and running
over like pot of yeast. You are enough
to make horse leave his oats"
At this last thrust Mrs. Polly Ann
jackson became 80 indignant that she
lost the use OF expression, and kept a
sullen silence, inwardly determined to
revenge her wrongs in some feminine
way, the machinery of which is well
known to the feminine world. But while
she was plotting against poor Daniel
Jackson's peace, the unconscious man
was making the room musical with that
rich, deep majestic scale of lower notes.
vulgariy called snoring, in which men
are royalty entitled to be called LORDS
of Creation"