Daily Republican., 1880-02-13

rage" said l, "but might possibly
buy one."
"Thank you, cousin Poyntz," said
Mr.. Sparkwell, blandly.
"And II there's any other little thing
you should happen to want" added,
'pray don't be backward in mention.
ing it,"
"No, I won't, cousin Poynts," said
the reverend gentleman, with the ut
most gravity.
And am bound to say that he kept
his word.
For three days | endured the swarm
of visitors which literally infested my
home, and then made mp my mind
that patience had ceased to be virtue
"I'll put q stop to this thing" SAID
|, to myself.
came home one night with tragi
cal expression on my face.
"Katharine," said l to my wife, "rn
ruined"
"What I" cried all the company al
once.
"Thoss shares in the Western Union
you know" said l, shifting my fore
head.
"Yes DEAR" gasped poor Kitty.
"They have gone down." said l.
"Not worth penny"
oh, John !"
~ wish had taken your advice, and
let 'em Alone" said |. "But after all
it doesn't matter SO much, as If | had
no friends"
Hooked beamingly around at my
wifs's relations. 1 hey returned the
glance by the blankest Of stares.
"IfI can borrow two hundred dol
lars apiece Of all these dear kindred, +"
said |, with obtrusive cheerfulness,
"and req 1est uncle Silas to endorse my
business notes"
~ couldn't think Of such thing"
hurriedly interrupted that gentleman.
~ should be most happy 10 o3lige," "
said cousin Joab, "but | am quite out
Of funds at present."
"And l." said the Reverend Mr..
Spsrkwell, pushing back his chair,
"must save what little share possess
in the worlds filthy lucre to pay my
passage and that Of my family back to
Minnesota"
Surely cried |, "you will not 60
away and leave me in such pecuniary
straits as these
The Reverend Mr.. Sparkwell signif.
cantly buttoned up his pockets.
otis every mans business to look
after himself, cousin Poyntz,' said he;
sand don't scruple to say that it is
dishonesty for q business
man like yourself to get into such f.
nancial difficulties"
And in fifteen minutes every cousin
in the lot had upon one excuse or
another, vanished from the room to
pack and prepare for immediate de-
parture.
looked at my wife; my wife looked
at me. | burst out laughing; Kitty be-
gan to cry.
my DEAR said /, "its an easier job
than thought it would be. / didn't
know but that 1t would be necessary
for me to catch the small pox, before l
could get rid Of your relations"
"But are We very poor, JohnS And
must we give up this dear little cottage
Oh, how cruel It is of cousin Joab, and
Mr.. Sparkwell, and uncle Silas, and all
,f them, not to help youl l know Mar
ANA Wilmerding has five thousand dol.
lars that she wants to put out at inter-
sst, for she said SO only yesterday, and
-"
"Yes, exactly said I. But probably
Jhe does not regard ne as very good
Investment"
"After all l have dons for thsm!"
'obbed my wife.
Relations are only human, my dear,
aid /.
The company took their leave with
'ut much ceremony of adieux, and that
.fternoon my wife came to me, with |
ears in her eyes.
"John," said she, twill you tell me
low much money yon have lost in that
lorried Western Union stock Be-
suse would rather know the worst at
nce."
"Lost :" repeated l, looking up from
he newspaper which was reading in
Jncle Silas' favorite easy chair, now
acated for the first time in many days.
WHY, who said that | had lost any
hing :"
"You did"
excuse me, my dear; said moth
ng of the kind. | merely stated that
he Western Union shares were not
,orth a penny. Neither were they, to
le, as | had sold out all possessed a
Ieek ago."
"John !"
"Yes, my dear"
GLOW could you 7"
every easily" said /, with latent
mile. "My dear, | think II your re-
atives had stayed another week,
hould have Committed suicide"
"And you told that horrid story Just
o get rid Of them f'
81 made that unimpeachable state
nent with that precise intention"
"They were rather trying, confessed
litty. Sand think they might have
Ielped you a little when they thought
'ou were bankrupt"
"They will not come visiting here
gain" said |, quietly.
And l was right. They did not.