The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1880-01-28

AAA4 tuhb ~ maCu IL SIC WdSAt dA bAh-C
throwing W Buzzsrd. l have Buzzard for
breakfast; Buzzard for dinner, and Buzzard
for tea; she says 1 don't sympathIze with her
in fact, l don't do anything like that pink of
perfection, Buzzard."
mix, 1 have a plan,' exclaimed Dick,
lowering his voice confdentially. We will
drop the curtain for the next half hour at the
end Of which behold Mix with a CLEAN of
hope lighting his sad visage, but shaking
his head obviously.
81 will try; but L never was good at acting.
Do you remember the time / tried to take
the part of Hamlet? MOI Well, you see
the man who had the part was taken sudden
ly i'll just befor the time set for the evening
performance; 1 was afflicted with stage fever
and had learned the part right through, so l
went to the manager and offered my services.
He accepted, and was to stand behind the
scenes to give me the cue. / got along
swimmingly, at least 1 thought / did, until
we came to that part where Hamlet says to
Ophelis, AGO, get thee to a nunnery.' /
heard the managers voice repeating ener-
getically. "Skin outl and sell peanuts for a
living, you ~lantern-jawed g~orillal' Now l
was morally certain that was not in the play
Dick, but / thought he ought to know, and
in the confusion-well, l repeated it to
Ophelia." he paused a moment. "How
that audience laughed and cheeredl the
manager rushed on, collsred m~e-and-well,
the play did not go on that evening"
Dick laughed heartily: "Never mind, old
fellow" said he, "this don't call for much
talent"
"Ahl Dick" said Mix, putting on his hat
to go out, ''you was never married; but I'll
try"
One morning about a week after this con-
versation, Mrs. Mix came down TO breakfast
in an unusually cheerful frame of mind. Her
new dress was stylish and becoming; the
morning was lovely; Mix obedient, and she
came very near humming a tune as she de-
scended the stairs to the parlor; but at the
door she stopped in amazement. Simon laid
on the sofa in his shirtsleeves. hair in a wild
tangle, and a handkerchief pressed tight over
his eyes. Her face dropped down to low
water mark Immediately.
Simon" she said, plaintively.
No answer; and both hands went up in
mute appeal to heaven. "Oh, my poor hus-
band; Just as L was beginning to be so
thankful that you were reforming. Oh, Buzz
zardl can you look down from heaven and
view your unhappy relict a d~runkards
wife2"
There was a smothered sob from behind
the handkerchief. She was really frightened
now. and cried:
"Simon Mix. do you want to drive me dis
tracted2"
"My poor SerenaI' another sob.
"What do you mean2"
A perfect torrent of grief answered her,
and, as if unable to control his feelings any
longer, Mix arose and commenced pacing up
and down the apartment, wildly u%ttering the
most heart rending groans.
"Ohl how bad l feel. SIM
Twas just ten years ago tonight, love;
Since 1 became your happy widow"
"Thatain't just right" shrieked the mourn
er; ''but l mean well"
You brutel what do you mean?"
Serena, reproachfully; II am symPa-
thizing with you. Have you forgotten what
doy IL ssP aDiG I'LL, ny heart. sit still" {.
cit is Wednesday, you idiotl'
"Nol mol it is not Wednesday, nor Thurs
day, nor Friday, nor any other day of the
week. 1t is the tenth anniversary of Buzz
Yards demise; the 2Sd day of March
And his soul goes marching"
o, you villaini you wretch screamed
Serena; "to make tun of my sainted Buzz
zardr'
Make fun, Serenal no, no; it is stern
reality to me. Death loves q shining mark,
but why did he bring down a buzzard?"
"Buzzard, thou vast mild and lovely,
Gentle a. a summer breeze"
Serena stepped up to him with blazing
eyes.
"You fool! what are you mourning for"
"That is So" returned Mix with a miser-
able snifae. "He is at rest; our loss is his
gain; but oh, Buzzard, why did you die?"
Ia the scene that followed there was little
chance for accurate description, but at the
end of 10 seconds a woman lay in Mysteries,
amid a mass of broken furniture, and a
wreck of humanity set out under the window
picking pieces of glass out of his damaged
epidermis.
In the annals of that judicial district is a
record that reads: "Mix VS.. Mix; divorce;
granted. Incompatibility of temper" Mix,
however, insists that it all came from trying
to sympathize with a sensitive woman, and
adds, "Darn a sensitive woman, anyhow"