davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
The Rothchilds Of, Paris have given
$4,000 to charitable objects within
the past two month.

Exposition Of 1876. Wandering
through the United States section Of
this truly wonderful Exhibition, hy-
perornament- and over displayed at the
most OF it is, / came upon an elegant
glass case, whose modestyiiwas the
more conspicuous from its neighbors
finery, surmounted by the motto
idignis praemia, and display ing, ina
Deat packages, the medical prepara-
tions of the house oi DR. j. 9. AVER
& Co., Lowell. Mass. ts1m
was aware Of tho. world rep-.
utation of this eminent firm, for the
character and quality eftheir goods,
and remember well their agents in
London. Messrs. Newberry, in St.
Paul. Churchyard. Having a leisure
hour, | determined, to examine the
contents Of this case, myself, and l
was surprised to see the delicate. por-
fiction to which they have brought
their household remedies. / was
chagrincd at the reflection that, while
we have at home the most skilful and
pre-cminently the best physicians in
the world, these Yankee doctors dist.
anco US 50. far in tho line Of popular
medicines for family use. They have
tho sharpness to take advantage pl
the high scioptiffc discoveries among
us, and make pills and potions as pal
atable as they are salutary. | wa,
told by leading druggist in Philadel.
phia, that DR. AYRR's mandatory
was the largest in american, giving
employment to hundreds. | must sc
o Lowell and sec it, on my way
omc.-Cor respo ndeace Of the Lon-
don Eng. 1'elegrph.q
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13


iasA pale-faced clerk in q Detroit
clothing store received a set back the
other day from all old woman which
will retard his growth for a year to
come. She entered the store in COM
pany with her son, and said. sa
I'll want to see some ulcer overcoats
for:boys"
"You mean ulster-u-l-s-t-e-r,'
he replied. l
r"Did ! ask for ulcer ovorcoats ?"
ayes, Ma'am."
fThen want to see ulcer overcoats,
no matter how you spell it, | got up
at o'clock this morning, rode four
teen miles facing the wind, sold two
hogs and barrel of cider, and II
don't know what 1 want Pm not 60
ing to take any advice from walk
ing goose quill like .you?"
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
ADAMS FALL.
WHAT IT HAS COST HUSBANDS AND
FATHERS EVER SINCE. rn
lwhitehill Times,l

lWhitehill Times,l ln
Adam was the first man-if he had
been shoemaker he would have
been the last man. DID, jog
He was placed in the Garden OF
Eden, and was himself the guardian
of Eden. He consequently had no
parti er to order him up of mornings,
and he, therefore played it alone.
All the clothes he had for a long
Time was the close of day while o
mantle Of night was his bedclothes.
He had dominion over the fish OF
the sea, the birdssef the ali, and he
also had doe minion over the earth.
lie was finally furnished with a
We van of A-rib-ia, who was sent to
Edon for Adams Express Company.
She was bone Of his beauin', and IL
she had been called Nancy she would
have been his bone-Nancy. los
She was pretty good cook, forh SO
soon cooked up trouble for Adam,
and got him into hot water. hp
When Adam went down to the
UmCo iuokuhhSo GNo uiWayo' WSht
10 her household duties but she was
fortunate woman in one respect !;
she had no washing to do on Monday,
so Adam was never afflicted by being
obliged to eat mush and milk from
the clock shelf. tst
Eve never called him back and told
him to send home solne soup or
starch at once, nor did 1t cost Adam
five shillings a week for ciothes-pins,
for the beautiful smile that Mr.. and
Mrs. Adam always wore could be
licked clean with the tip ends oftheir
tongues.
But they were nota happy couple,
for the Fouih of July was unknown
in Eden. -s1i5e
They never listened to the bang Of
the cannon, tho gun Or the fire-cracker
bnt Evo used 10 bang her hair quite
often. '' = p .'''l9 ~ @''.
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13


A PRoFgssoR's JoKE.-A good
story is told in Edinburgh about that
genial professor, Blackic. One day
shortly before the. close OF the lato
session, the professor being, through
some cause. prevented from lecturing,
there was posted on the Greek class
room door q notice 10 this fleet:
"Prof Blackie regrets he isupablc TO-
day to meet his Glasses" A waggish
student, spying this, scrapcd out the
initial letter of the last word OF Tho
sentencc, and made II appear as II tho
professor was rcgretinl At his ina
billty TO meet those fair specimens Of
humanity familiarly known outside
tho collc5e quadrangle as tlic'"lasscs
But who can joke with Blackic?
Tho keen eyed old man, noticing tho
.prank that had been played on him,
quietly erased another letter, and
left the following TO be read BY whom
il might concern; "Prof. Blaekic re-
grcls he is unable to-day to meet his
usses?' fH g
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

Alta performance of the cantata OF
Esther" at Dallas, Texas. Ahasuerus
was advised by somebody in the au-
dience not to "put it too fat.". The
personator of tho great Assyrian
went to the foot lights aud said
"Thls Is a religious show, aud you'll
have to be decent. I'm Ahasuerus
just now. but after the show I'm
Sam Turner and II any duffer would
like to cut ii fat thon, III give him q
mighty live welcome"
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

A BENEVOLENT WoRK.-The Meth
odist church, of New York is con-
stantly engaged in providing for the
increase Of It's borders. TO separ-
ate organization has been committed
the work Of extending the influence
of tho church. Rev. VIM. p. Corbitt.
tho famous revivalist, is chairman OF
this committee of cxtension-and he
used to bo q martyr Of neuralgia,
His cure he ascribes TO Giles Lini-
ment iodine Ammonia. Giles Pills
cures Jauudice. Send for Pamphlet.
DR.. Giles. $50 West Broadway, n. Y.
Sold by Il. II. Hopper Il Son. Trial
size IS cents. .f
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
A Captains Story,

"Well its purity hot" answered d
lake captain in one Of the ferry dock
saloons yesterday, "but it Isn't moth
ing 10 the summer of 1886. Wo had
it at least twenty degrees hotter than
this right along for six weeks. | was
running the Mary Jane between Chi
cago and Buffalo then, and ! have
seen the thermometer stand at 130
degrees iu the middle of Lake HUI
ron"
"That was awful" sighed one OF
the sisters. au
"Well 1t was fairish, but VIC didn't
call it very hot till we got into the
st. Clair River and the mercury went
up TO $50 degrees when hanging
against the water butt The boys
used up 729 palm leaf fans ON ono
"trip that year. Onone of our trips
down we were becalmed for three
days OIL Lake HuroIi, We got it
there and no mistake, -Il
"Purty hot, ell 2"
"Well, Pm an old man, and / don I
care to go lying at this day, but LII
tell you q few solemn facts. Every
sail Oh that schooner smoked and
smouldered Till they fell TO pieces on
deck and left us under bare. poles !
Yes, sir, we hadn't a rag aloft as big
as your hand. That was just at sun
rise IN the morning, and in an hour
we had TO Wot down decks TO prevent
them burning. | went down stairs
TO consult the thermometer, aud 1t lay
on the floor all melted into chunk
of glass and tin! Then l began to
realize how hot II was and l got
frightened"
"What could you OF"
"Well, not much. We had begun
to rig lines over the lee eide, 80 that
all could take to the water, when the
top yard sail came down aud killed
the cook. The links in the chains had
melted right outi never knew q
case like It since, but then the wealth.
er has cooled off greatly since 1885.
,And about the cook "
"Ah! young man, how little you
green reporters know OF the great
lakes spread out before your gaze on
The mapsl Why, the minute we
struck the. water we begun squirming
like SO many eels. The lake was red
hot. The water would have cooked
an egg in four minutes. | was blis-
tered from head to heel IN NO time.
some day | will take of my coat and
show you my back. The flesh was
actually cooked to depth OF two
inches, and for over two years the
dogs used to scent cooked meat when
| walked out, aud followed me by
dszens. Five surgeons tainted away
in o heap at the sight of my left
shoulder, aud theonly man / could
get TO dress my back was butcher
under sentence of DEATH" s.
at must have been terrible. How
did you come out of the calm ?"
"Well, while l was squirming in
the water white squall struck the
schooner and down she went. 1t
was all over i'll a minute, aud air and
water were hotter than ever /
struck out for the Canadian shore,
over a hundred miles away, knowing
that II was sink or swim, but in half
ali hour was safe," y
"Picked up?" '
"Well, no. replied tho captain, as
he scratched his leg, III struck an
iceberg and climbed up into a cave
near the top! tell you 1t was q
grateful change to me, and that's one
reason why can never see hunk of
ice and q lemon without feeling CRATE
ful to the man who invented BOTH"
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

48 COLUMNS. DO YOU TAKE IT?
The Sunny South has been con-
stantly improving till it has now
nearly attained perfection, The last
issue comes to us enlarged to As col
umns, is really a grand number in
every respect, and everybody should
send for it without delay. In future
it will combine all the best features
Of all tha papers ofthe day, and may
Justly be called "the national family
paper Of the South, ,",for every family
will surely take it. 1t will contain
every possible variety of reading mat
ter; with splendid illustrations, and
everything 70 entertain, amuse and in
struct q family. Make up clubs in
every community, aud send right
along for it. Clubs Of five can get il
for $500 each year, A single copy
is $3.50. Don't wait for agents. Ad-
dress j. Ii. d w. B. SEALS,
Atlanta. Ga,
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
NUMBER 2.
A Big Thing

"Big thing, this telegraph
"YeS," said !, ait is as big sa grape
vine"
"No joking" he said. al came
here to New York, yesterday, one
hundred miles out of my way to see
man. When got here went to
the st. Nicholas, and when | was
ready to go out and see my man, by
jocks. stranger, ] had lost his address,
and, by George, l couldn't think of
his first name even, And his last
name was johnson. Easy name to
hunt, eh? [ was lost. You know what
it is to find anybody in New York
when you don't know their address,
1t is worse that finding an honest
man. Well, this man was. a new
conner here; name wasn't in the di-
rectory. l asked questions until /
made fool of myself.
"rhen | said to the Telegraph OPP
orator at the st. Nicholas: o'7sJ
"It'll keep me here week. I've
got to write to st. Louis and get that
mans address," fy oni
Telegraph" the operator SAID.
swell. never thought, of that, be-
fore, ] wrote a despatch right away:
"To Gcttit \ Keapit,, brokers, ST.
Louis. What is our man Johnson's
first name, and what's his address?"
And in due time the answer came
back. s4s ssDgs.i-ilA ,7@
H"James p, ST.. Nicholas Hotel"
'ii"What do you think Of that,
stranger? ] went to the clerk and
said:
"Is James P, johnson in his room?"
"That is Mr.. James P. Johnson"
said the clerk. Z 40
"rhs man, stranger, was standing
beside me, waiting for me to move so
that he could speak to the clerk. And
| had Just sent 1,064 miles to find out
where he was. Funny, stranger.
wasn't it?" A..
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

YIcK's FLORAL GUIDE.-This work
is before us, and those who send five
cenIs to James Wick, Rochester, N.
Y Tor 1t will be disappointed. In
stead of getting cheap thing, as the
price would seem TO indicate, they
will receive a very handsome work
of 100 pages, and perhaps 500 illus
tralions mot cheap, but elegant Illus
trations, on the very best Of calander-
cd paper, and as a set off to the whole,
an elegant Colored Hate that we
would judge cost twice the price of
the book. JANEs VIcK.
Rochester, N. Y.
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

No sooner does prosperity begin
TO dawn, with rosy light upon the
country try than Cupid comes, the
little rascal, poisoning the peace OF
the young folks and making propara
lions for eating up the new-tound
prosperity. The epidemidemic Of
marriage means long division OF
bread and meat. The country accu-
mulates am ample store out of which
two people could eat, drink and be
merry, and stfaitway the fates, with
the apt aid of Cupid, decree there
shall be ten people instead OF two.
What rs all this folly, but as If man
and his wife, having by great, toll and
self-denial, procured tolerable
square meal for two, should strait
way go out and invite eight more in
to starve. Such at least would be
the reasoning of Milthus: but still,
nevertheless, bless you, children go
on in the happy belief that there is
never q mouth made but there is
something made to put in it; for it is
decreed that the race of man shall &c
on accomplishing It's destiny. We
who are here not allowed to sit down
and eat at a full table, enjoying the
things we have, saying; After us
the flood. The race, as we'll as the
individual, must live and work out
its own destiny, the multiplying ant
replenishing'race has to eat the green
earth as bare and black and barren al
the, blasted moon. If, however, 4
comes to pass that this augumentine
race of man shall eat the word to {
barren rock and find itself, relapsine
into a collection of litchens, clingine
to the granite foundation of this
once verdurous earth, we want II un-
derstood that we have warned per.
verse generation what oil this multi
plication of mouths is going to lead
to- Still go on and see what yor
will come Ito and, bless you all thu
same.--American. aa.J
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

Galveston, Dec. 23--The News
special IRON Denison says: IA freight
train on the Missouri, Kansas Il Tex
as road broke through burning
bridge near Durant Station" The To-
comotive passed over safely, but the
tender and twenty cars were wrecked
and burned. se
Mike Kelly, the fireman fell into the
fire and was burned to death. Brake
man Abernathy was slightly injured.
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

The flmor seems well founded
ahnt y number of prominent citizens
OF Baltimore have resolved to erect u
monument TO the memory of tho latn
Dr. j. W. Dali, iiscovcror Of that
wonderful remedy, Dr. Bulls Cough
Syrup.
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13

You may brush, you may crush
your old coat if you will. but the
smell of camphor will cling to it still.
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
He Couldn't Converse.

They were sitting on the stoop to-
gether. 1t was just about SAT p. m.
The moon was floating serouely
across the heavens, which looked
like an immense strech of pale satin
dipped with diamonds. There
wasn't breeze enough TO make the
violets nod. The dew fell with its
customary soitness, and was pillowed
upor the petal OF the dreaming lily.
After they had contemplated all the
beauty OF the foregoing tintype he
broke the silence.
ut rained this morning, didn'tit,
my petf"
ut did," she replied, sweetly.
We've had great deal ofrain
lately, haven't we dearest2" he went
on as he gave hitch to his suspend
ers. rfl
"We have" fss
"Do you like rain my little peach ?"
"No.n a,-s,, -l
Neither do l." a'
Then there was another long pause,
and more contemplation Of the afore-
said tintype, when the youth again
went OH very feebly:
Does my httle-gold haired gum
drop think twill rain tomorrow n
~ think not" sa
81 wonder If It viii rain on next
Thursday~ ~. sanasfs JdgaB
Don't know; butt think it will
rain tomorrow" l ra
"Why do you think SO n aa
"Why, because the skies are
cloudy?" f1f "'i
"They are quite bright" he went
on with a smile. i6g Te,eesi.i nui
hey your PARDON she responded
good naturedly, at was one of your
ears that took for dark cloud"
And then the young man who
couldn't get 'up'a conversation abb
ruptly left. .,f te& te.,r4f M
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
BETHELCOLLEGE

RUSSELLvILLE, KY.
MKT TERN DEGISs SEPTEMBER FOURTH,
Entire expenses for torn OF flve months, In
cluding board, lodging, tuition, fuel, washing,
lights and books, only $500 @tl
Baptist Liccntiate and sans OF active Bnp.
tist Ministers pay no tuition. Liccntiatcs
helped from Beneficiary Fund.
Course full. Situation remarkably healthy.
Z, Send postal for eataioguei contaiping full
particulars. Address. n " e ~
LEsLIEwAGGENB Pres't.
The south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1879-1883, 1880-01-13
--------------------
A GREAT PAPER.
The National Family Paper
Of the South.

4s COLUMNS, DO YOU TAKE IT?
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1880-06-05
safety I'm Thunder storms.

The safest place IN thunder storm is the
interior of an iron building, or of a house
well provided with lightning rods. As 10
what meets the latter condition, il is suni-
cient TO say that the application of lightning
rods Is matter demanding the exercise of
expert knowledge and judgment, and in
telligent apprehension Of the law OF electric
ity. Experience has shown that Il is not
safe TO trust TO an ignorant person the de
cision as to the quantity and location or
arrangement of lightning rods for any
building what 50 ever Under ordinary cir.
cumstances, in n house without any rods.
or with rods improperly adjusted, the safest
position is a horizontal one, i'm the middle
of a room, upon feather bed elevated
above the floor. An iron bed stead, how
ever, furnishes perfectly safe position, and
wooden bedstead may be made "A safe
place OF refuge by attaching metallic wires
to the corner posts and connecting them
all together by other wires running from
one TO the other around the bed In these
circumstances, a discharge of lightning is
provided with an easy path in any dircc-
ton, either vertical or horizontal. a a no
injury can ensue TO "a person lying upon.
such bedstead. Number nine annealed
iron wire or "A small copper or brass wire
may be conveniently and efTeCtually used
TINS way; or strips of sheet metal may
be tackled on. Nails, bell-wlres, stove fun
nelS and other metals in buildings present
an interrupted path for lightning. Ii is
especially dangerous therefore, 10 assume a
position between two detached lines or
masses OF conducting matter. For exam
pie, person has been killed by lightning
while seated in chair with his head lean
ing against bell knob i'm another in
stance, man was killed by "A discharge of
lightning, which passed from socallcd
lightning rod on the outside OF the wall TO
the quicksilver on the back of the mirror,
IN front OF which he was standing thence
through him into the floor. and TO stove
pipe IN the next lower story Positions
near windows, doors, and fire places are to
be avoided as particularly dangerous. Out
| OF doors the safest position is flat upon the
ground. away from any tree or other elc
waited object. Thoroughly wet clothing is
partial conductor, and gives increased
security to the wearer. An umbrella with
AN iron or steel shaft, having attached to
the handle metallic chain or flexible wire
cord long enough TO trail upon the ground.
would protect the person carrying #.
Farmcrsmight easily arm their wagons with
wires IN manner similar TO that already
suggested for bedstead, or they can fasten
a wire on long handled pitch fork or rake.
and then hold il vertically, with one end i'm
the ground and thus secure protection. The
interior of a barn containing new bay or
grain, is "A very dangerous place i'm thun-
der storm, and such building need lightning
rods of the most complete and perfect des
criptIon.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1880-06-05
An Australian Opns,um.

The tree was large one Its bark was
smooth like glass. Cutting notch I'm the
bark, and embracing as much of the huge
trunk as possible with his arms, the black
fellow mounted the height of the step, then.
standing with his toe in the notch, with his
tomahawk he proceeded to cut another.
about the height of his waist, which he also
ascendcd, keeping his body Hat TO the tree.
step by step he gradully rose looking like
"A lly walking up a window pane, until he
reached the first fork, nearly forty feet
above the ground A sudden twist enabled
mm to surmomt this difficulty, after which
nc walked among the branches with the
activity of monkey Selecting one with
n hole in it, he dropped two or three small
stones which Inc had carried up with him
down the hollow, listening intcnty as they
rumblcd down the pipe They all stopped
mt particular place Descending 10 the
spot Stick the mud cut into the hollow.
and, inserting his hand, drew forth "A large
opossum, its eyes blinking i'm the daylight
few knocks against the the tree deprived
1t OF life, and throwing it down, its captor
descended, grinning rom ear to eur his
appreciation of the white fellows compli
ments AS To his dcXterity. Blacks never
move without tircslicb: and soon the
opossum, diycstcd OF its fur, was roasting
ON a fire, emitting most inviting odor un-
der the circumstances IT makes Stick. in
the-mud, who has only lately despatched
an immense meal, hungry again; and John
has some difficulty in persuading him not
to seize the half roasted creature and bite
out piece. The black fellow looks aston
ishcd; the prohibition is quite against the
customs Of his race; however, he gives i'm,
contcnting himself by throwing the cntrails
on the fire for moment, and soon, TO his
guests horror lac commenced dispatchinR
yards Of the scarcely warmed intcstincs, at
the conclusion Of which operation his face
presented "a sickcning spectacle
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1880-06-05
Business Maxims.

Choose the kind Of business you under
stand.
Capital is positively required in business,
even if you have real estate outside and
credit ever 80 good.
One kind Of business is as much as a
man can manage successfully. Invest
ments on the outside do not generally pay.
especially if you require the money in your
business.
Buy cautiously and just what you want,
and do not bc persuaded 20 purchase what
you do not need; If you do you will soon
want what you can't buy.
Insure your stock insure your store
insure your dwelling, If you have one. If
the rate Is high il is only because the risk
is great, and Of course you should not take
the risk yourself a business that will not
pay for insuring will not justify running
Sell 20 good, responsible parties only
Sell on a specified time. and when your
money is due demand it; do not let the
account stand without note OF interest for
an indefinite period.
Sell at q reasonable profit aud never mis-
represent To- effect e sale.
Live within your income. keep your
business % yourself; have patience and
you will succeed.
Competition is the life of trade. but iu
trying % run your competitors out of busi-
ness, De careful you do not run yourself
ont