The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1880-10-28
Sparks.

A joint afair-A rheumatism. Il
Waste IF Putting it in depot.
A bouncing baby-A rubber doll.
A ship ruled by women Courtship.
Blue fishing When they don't bite.
Grand aunt of the world Antiquity.
A stag is frequently obliged to run for
deer life. p.
Light literature bank book with no
balance. -.* W.
How to keep your rooms warm. Keep
your CRATES coal'd.
Would it be vulgar to call soothing
syrup kidnappers
Many high-m1nded schoolgirl dis
dams vulgar fractions.
Why is shoemaker like an honest
lovers Because he is faithful to the
last. .-..a .... "
"lt you make it hoptional with me,''
says the Englishma1, an take beer.'
Tennyson spends hours on single line.
So, BY the way, does the washerwoman.
In written spelling exercise, "fore-
goes' was given out; little boy wrote,
'Go, 60, so, CO.,
Said the landlady: GIVE given you
your board, Bill, and now want you to
give me my board-bill.''
When a cat gives IN entertainment on
the top of wall, it isn't the cat we OBJ
ject to, It's the waul. ,...-3
Why is mans chin the most unlucky
part Of his body2 Because it is constant
~ getting into scrapes. a.
The reason given why an old toper,s
| mouth would make good sole leather, was
| that 1t would never let in water.
This is the latest for wedding invita-,
Etlons: "Come around and see us capture
mother-in-law, at eight o'clock, sharp"
A farmer, when fagellating two of his
unruly boys, was asked what he was do
Ing. "Thrashing wild oats,'' was the re-
ply.
If your son has no brains don't send
him to college,"
You cannot make palace out of o
shanty by putting French root on it.
The CRATE art of kontentment konsists
not only in being satisfied with what we
have got, but with what we hain't nor
kant git. .~
Has any Photographer ever called
young lady speaker at woman's rights
meeting a wind-lass2 He's "a real mean
thing" if he has.
sAunty, vot makes de little baby cry
SO? Do it want il mudder?'
| eyes, dear, and its fodder too"
Full many rose Is born to blush I'M
seen, and waste its fragrance on the des-
ert air; full! many MP is taken behind
the screen, and cloves and coffee, too, are
eaten there.
The two important events in the life
of man are, when he examines his upper
lip and sees the. hair coming, and when
he examines the top Of his head and sees
the hair going.
A western pader mentions a rattle
snake being killed by "a man with thir-
teen rattles." The man must have been
a policeman, though very few policemen
carry thirteen rattles.
Puck: Melikoff says that proving
for the Gar is altogether too expensive
tor family man. He is either to strike
tor an increase of pay or to charge shoot
age.
The IRISH people can't eat the speeches
made in this country over their woes,
nor yet make soup of the resolutions
passed at mass meetings. What they
want is pork and potatoes.
'SWhy Hans you have the most fen1i-
nine cast Of countenance I have ever
SEEN"
80, yaw,'' was the reply, II know de
reason for dat; mine modder was wo-
man."
"say," said city youth to a modest
countryman, s'got the hay seed out OF
your hair yet?"
"Wall, ''was the delicate reply,"I jedge
not, by the way the calves run after me.''
They tell story about Yankee tai
lor dunning man for the amount Of his
bill. The man said he was sorry, very
sorry indeed, but he could not pay it.
"Well," said the tailor II took you
for a man who would be sorry; but if
you are sorrier than I am, I'll quit
| a = IL. l..