Morning journal and courier., 1880-07-23

the neighbors want to blab themselves hoarse about it they can, for won't stand it anoth- CT day''
 eBut what's the matter? Don't your hus- band provide for you? Don't he treat you kindly ?'' pursued the lawyer.
 'We get victuals enough, and don't know but he's as true and kind as men in general, and he's never knocked none of us down. I wish he had, then I'd get him into jail and know where he was nights, retorted the wo- man.
 'Then what is your complaint against him ?"
 'sWeH, if you must know, he's one of them plagIey jiners.'
 "A what ?''-
 "A jiner-one of them peslzy fools that's l always jining something There can't noth- ing come along that's hark and sly and hid den but he'll jine it. If anybody should get 1 up 8 society to burn his house down, he'd jine it just as soon as he could get in and if he had to pay for it he'd go all the suddener. We hadn't been married more'n two m onths before he jined the Know-Nothin's. We lived on farm then, and every Saturday night he'd come tearing in before supper, grab @ fistful of nut cakes, and go off gnawing them, and that's the last I'd see of him till morn ing. And every other night he'd roll and 1 tumble in his bed, and hoIler in his sleep | Put none but Americans on guard-George Washington ; and rainy days he would go 1 out in the corn-barn and jab at picture of the Pope with an old bayonet that was there I ought to put my foot down then, but he fooled me so with his lies about the Pope's coming to make all the Yankee girls marry Irishmen, and to eat up all the babies that warn't born with cross on their foreheads, that I let him go on and encouraged him in 1t.
 '"Then he jined the Masons. P'raps you know what them be, but don't 'cept they think they are the same kind of critters that I,S1 IL, T ,f concubines and of all the darned nonsense and gab about worshipful master and square | and compasses and sich like that we had in the house for the next six months, you never see the beat And he's never outgrowed it, nuther. What do you think of a man, l squire, that'1l dress himself in a white apron, bout big enough for 8 monkeys bib, and go marching up and down and making motions and talking the foolish lingo at picture of l George Washington in a green jacket and Q | truss on his stomach? Ain't he a loonytick? :? Well, that's my Sam, and I've stood it as | long as I'm going to.
 ''The next lunge the old fool made was in to the Odd Fellows. I made 1t warm for him when he came home and told me he'd jined them, but he kinder pacified me by telling me they are sort of branch show that took in women and he'd get me in as soon as he found out how to do it. Well, one night he come home and said I'd been proposed and some body had blackballed me. Did 1t hissef, of course. Didn't want me around knowing to his goings on. Of course he didn't and told him so.
 '"Then he fined the Sons of Matter Didn't say nothing to me about 1t, but sneaked off one night, pretending he'd got to sit up with sick Odd Fellow, and never found it out, only he come home lookin' like man who had been through Q threshing machine, and wouldn't do a thing for him until he owned up. And so it's gone from bad to wus, jinin' this and | that and t'other, till he's worship minister of | the Masons, and goodness of hope of the Odd | Fellows and sword swallower of the Finne- l gans, and virgin cerus of the Grange, and l grand Mogul of the Sons of Indolence, and l two-edged tomahawk of the United Order of l Black Men, and tale bearer of the Merciful l Manikins, and skipper of the Guild -Caratine | Columbus and big wizard of The Arabian l Nights, and pledge passer of the Reform | Club, and chief bulger of the Irish Mechan-
 ics, and purse keeper of the Order of the Ca | nadian Conscience and the double -barreled l dictator of 4he Knights of the Brass Circles, 1 and standard bearer of the Royal Archangels, l and sublime porte of the Onion League, and
 chambermaid of the Celestial Cherubs, and l puissant potentate of the Terrified Pigstick- l CTS, and the Lord only knows what else. I've
 borne it and borne it, hopin' he'd get lem all
 jined after while, but tain't no use, and
 when he'd got into new one, and been made | grand guide of the Nights of Horror, I told | him I'd quit and I will
 Here the major interrupted, saying:
 ''Wen, your husband is pretty well initia ted, that's a fact but the court will hardly call that a good cause for divorce. The most | of the societies you mention are composed ot 1 honorable men, and have excellent reputa
 tions. Many of them, though called lodges l are relief associations and mutual insurance
 companies. which, if your husband should
 die, would take care of you and would no
 see you suffer if you were sick.''
 See me suffer when Pm sick Take cart
 of me when he's dead Well, I guess not
 can take care of myself when he's dead, anc
 if can't get another! There's plenty
 of lem! And they needn't bother themselvel
 when I'm sick, either. If I want to be sicl
 and suffer, it's none of ther business espe
 cially after all the suffering I've had when
 ain't sick, because of their carryin's on. AnG
 you needn't try and make me believe it's al
 right, either. know what 1t is to live witt
 a man that tines so many lodges that he don'
 never lodge at home, and signs his name
 ''Yours truly, Sam Smith, M. M, l. O. O
 F., K. O. B., K. of P, P. of H., R. A. NJ
 l. T. P, X. of K, N. C., l.. B. T., H. E. R.
 R. I. P, K Y. E." etc.
 "Oh, that's harmless amusement" quietly
 remarked MT. Huse.
 She looked him square in the eye and said
 'I believe you are jiner yourself
 He admitted that he was to a certain ex
 tent, and she arose and said, 'I wouldn'
 have thought it. A man like you, chairman
 of Sabbath school and superintendent O
 the Republicans It's enough to make
 woman take pisen! But don't want any
 thing of you. I want lawyer that don
 belong to nobody nothin'.'' And she bolt
 tain Patten kept.