Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1880-02-12
Sips Of Fun.

! Courtship, says an exchange,
is not run by the rule Of three.
But after courtship is run by 10;
the woman !, and the man o.
Old bachelors are credited
with having a mis-shun in the
world, but it is very rarely you
find an old maid who has a man
shun.
n Kentucky man was hit in
the leg by bullet while on his
knees in prayer. Such a thing
might not occur again in Ken
lucky in 1000 years.
1t is difficult to understand
why wife never asks her hus-
band "if the doors are all lock-
ed' until after he's snugly COW
cred up in bed.
He said, ~ think III utilize
your suggestion" She replied
flushed with Indignation, 81
don't tell lies, and you're q mean
nasty thing"
The word "Caution" appears
in many medicine advertise
ments, and a good deal Of at
tcntion should be paid to it.
'Did you do nothing to resus-
citate the bodyY was recently
asked of a witness at a coroner's
inquest. Eyes, sir, we searched
the pockets" was the reply.
A young gentleman advertis-
cd for a wife, through the Chi
cago papers, and received an
iswers from eighteen husbands,
saying that he could have theirs.
"I know victim to tobacco"
said a lecturer, "who hasn't tast-
cd food for nearly thirty years"
"How do you know he hasn't?"
asked an auditor. because to-
bacco killed him in 1850"
A gentleman accidentally steps
on a dainty poodle led by an eI-
egant woman. "StupId! A lit
tie more and you would have
crushed Fido." "Ah! if / had
crushed him | would have re-
placed him." "You flatter your
SELF"
How to live on two dollars
week and save money-Get
married and Sponge" OH your
wife's parents. One dollar and
seventy-fve cents will keep you
in beer and cigars, and the other
twenty-five cents you can put
away for rainy day.
Child scarcely three years
old) looking wistfully at a di-
minutive pie: Mother-"Now,
Meta, | want you TO save your
nice pic SO your papa can sec it
when he comes home" Child
looking still more wistfulIy-
81 sink j could tell papa czacly
how il looks"
In ore of Chicago's suburbs,
at a recent Sunday school meet
ing, a longwinded clergyman
consumed too much OF the time
with a wordy address. When
be sat down, the leader of the
meeting announced a hymn
one by Bliss-beginnIng "EIal-
lelujahI tits done!" He didn't
mean it, but it was aProPos.
That's right, dear sisters, send
your starving neighbors a good
supply of tracts. 1t is wonder
ful what JOY and brightness
basketfull Of tracts will bring
to the dear little ones who hay-
emit tasted bread for several .
days. Then. too, it cheers the
disconsolate mother too to sec
her darling, provided for by
Christian charity.
A gentleman who was given
TO boasting and was apt to make
critical comments on the COM
pany whenever he was invited
out said to JerrolI, II dined mt
the Marchioness' the other day,
and, would you believe it, they
had no fish!' Jerroll thought
moment and then replied,
"Ahi well, | suppose it was all
eaten up stairs"
Talking about nerye-real
downright nerve-thcrc's a.
young fellow we knew who eau
toss u waiter his last 50 biil in
payment fora couple of creams,
take the lady ont to her carriage,
put her in, stand smiling oa the .
curbstone till she turns the cor
ner--and then go back and te-
,,,a,,d b;s ohoncya