Ashtabula weekly telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1880-1886, 1880-11-05
BURDETTE TO THE SMART :,
YOUNG MAN.

AAAttNeNIa
In the Boston Herald of September IA, 1 read
the following advertisement:
"WANrED.-A chance 10 work In some we'll
established business mousse, either as salesman
or accountant or both, by young man Of
thorough business trimming, VINO has never
preached or prayed in public, neither has been
treasurer or superintendent OF Sabbath
schools, or betrayed any confidence reposed
in him, but who relies for worldly success on
the Old-iashiUned qualities Of integrity, intel
ngenCc, good health and good nature; will
work with muscle and brain for the same com
pensatOn given by the city Tor muscle only
nrst-cass city references. Address II. l.. c.
Herald office"
Now, as has been aforctime observed by
Mr. Weller, you generally find every udver-
tisement In a paper promptly answered by
another card in the next column of the same
issue. Where you hnd the appeal of man
for a situation as salesman you frequently
lind beside it the inquiry of a man who is
looking for a salesman. If one man has IA
horse 10 sell there is usually some man VINO
wants TO buy horse. And so looked all over
that copy of the Boston Herald TO see II there
wasn't some business house advertising for
just that sort of salesman. Idldnt lind it
glanced at other Boston papers, but couldn't
see that any house wanted a salesman or
accountant whose first recommendation was
that he had never preached or prayed in
public" got hold of a New York paper or
two, wondering II the young man would have
any better show in the metropolis. But 1
couldn't see any special chance for him. |
could not lind that any business house was
anXiOusly looking for an accountant who had
never beer guilty of the grave Offense of
preaching or praying where anybody could
near him' couldn't lind that any merchant
was especially looking for some young man
who had never gone wrong 50 far as to become
" treasurer or superintendent of Sabbath
school They didn't seem to hunger after
thnt particular kind OfyOung man.
looked at the young mans advertisement
long time, and IL seemed to me that he was a
very young man, indeed. He must be very
young, or he would know that to preach and
10 pray, even boldly, without being ashamed
Of it, in broad daylight, in the presence of
htty, hundred or three thousand people, is
not considered, even by business men, as a
vicious habit, or an indication of loose morals.
do not know who the young man has been
accustomed to hear preach. / do not know
what manner OF pruyermectings he has at
tended, but It Is very evident that he has re-
ceNcd a very erroneous impression of preach
ing and praying I'm their effect and influence
upon a business-like character, or upon the
mercantile world. do not know what kind
OF business the young man is anxious to Gu
gage In, ii the best recommendation the em-
plOye can offer the house Is that he has
never preached or prayed in public" POssi-
bly, desk in the general Office of the Liberal
League, which met recently in Chicago and
was 50 disgustingly goddess and nasty that the
pest nhue! in America left II in speechless dis
gust may be open to him.
And then the young man brings another
proud recommendation to the business house
thut may be sO fortunate as TO receive his in
valuable service He can lay his hand on his
heart ana say, with pride, that he has never
been treasurerOr superintendent OF Sabbath
stuOlls inlh Recommendation Is rather
supCriiuous, as his first one covers the ground.
IL is very likely that II the only recDmmenda-
he could bring to the Sabbnth-schOol was the
fact thut he never "preaCned or PRAYED" the
SaDbath-schOOl would endcavOr TO get along
for n little while without treasurer or super
intendent, until II could iind Il more liberal
candidate, for even the Sabbath-sChuuls and
churches are tlnctured strongly with liberal
ism, and set their faces against the bigOtry
that blindly aud stupidly refuses to see any
good in sermons and prayers, and will not go
MnDre sermons and DTlVers mu1n nm a 1ppu
not want To engage in business with people
VINO tolerate preuching and praying. Oh, no.
young man, all the "bgUtry' in the world
isn't round inside the pale of the church, by
any means.
Indeed, the young mans statement of his
position In regard to the Subbuth-sChOOl Is
only another indication of his exceeding
youth. Had he known anything about Sab
bath-schOols he would have known that the
treasurer of Il Sabbnth-sChOol does not have
70 give bonds, like u county treasurer, to keep
MIN from running away with the money. All
nos but he often has 10 run his generous
mana down INTO his own pocket to buy the pa
pers and books that the hearts of the little peo-
pie long for.
Aud Ihen, In consequence of his rivld absti-
nence from church and Subbath-school the
young man wishes us 10 infer he has never
betrayed any confidence reposed In him."
wen, we 9oh know yet thAt any BODY reposed
any confidence In him. Certainly the church
people never did; they never gave him "a
chuuce To bctruy their confidence, because he
never preached for them. Nobody ever
placed any confidence in his ability In sunday
school matters, because they never elected
him superintendent, and IL Is sadly apparent
from tho young mans own statement, that
they wouldn't even trust him with the little
handful OF pennies and nCkels that are gath
cred up from sunday TO sunday from the lutte
people IL Is u worry thin recommendation for
young man, brethren, when he can't even
DO trusted 10 handle the scauty fund Of an NV
eraage sunday-seh9ol collection; He doesn't
tel us thpt anybody else ever did repOse any
confidence In him, he simply says that the sun
y-schnolpeople didn't
And thon couldn't help thinking, as l read
thc nuNel tsement again aud again, how
quickly after telling the merchants Of Boston
that he never preached or prayed nor held
ONCE IN Sabblth-schOOls, how quickly he hast
encd to assert thut he had "ncver betrayed
amy confidence repOsed I'm him." He seemed
70 thlnk that II was time he was giving his
character boost ordinarily, when a
young man nsks for situation in some "wel-
established house," IL is taken for granted
that his character IL good and that he "has
never betrayed any confidence reposed in
him without setting IL forth In the advertise
ment, IL Is expected that he can bring good
references with him. but this young man.
after proudly basing his claims for the situa-
tion upon the fact that he never breaches und
doesn't pray IN public, and never was sun
dny-sChuOl OOiCer, seems TO think II necessary
70 say something really good of himself. He
hastens 20 assure the mercantile world that
ne Is bettcr than they would think, from his
foregoing references, that, IL he did stay
away from church and sunday-school, he
never betrayed any confidence. Perhaps Il
occurred 70 him Just then that 10 be preacher
or u Sunday-schOOl superintendent wasn't
necessarily TO be rascal. This young man
really appears TO grow younger every time he
speaks.
But" the young man says, soorning the
ministry the church, the Sunday-schoOl, and
even, US his advertisement reads the fact that
he has "never betrayed any confidence re-
posed In him," scOrning all these aud setting
them aside as worthless aids 70 worldly sue
cess, he Celies for worldly success ON the old
fashioned qualities Of integrity, intelligence,
good health aud good nature"
And do hope, for the sake of the young
mans worldly success, that his integrity IS
greater than his intelligence, and that his
health Il better than bis nature, For the sam
pie OF intelligence that he lays out for the in-
speotion of business men In his advertisement
doesn't show up a very good lot. Aud the
good nature exhibited In IL Is not the best
kind OF good nature, Il Is very dyspeptie,
that good nature. IL Is sdiscOurteOus, satirical,
unjust little mean, should say, yes, deCid-
eddy mean, and altogether ill-natured. II Il
isn't unjust ana mean and ilEnUtured TO In
sinuate that sayiug ones prayers, or preach
ing, or attending Sunday-schOOl and "hOlding
othoe therein disquallies a young man from
holding "a situation In a "welEestablishedh husi-
ness house." then don't know how man Is
going TO say anything unjust or ill-natured.
The young man may have "gOOd health" as
ho says, but II that advertisement does not
run back % the worst kind OF dyspepsia, I'm
mistaken In my diagnosis. And then, why
should he call these Old-tashiOned qualities"
as II 20 distinguish them from preaching and
prayingi Does his Old-fashiOned "intell-
genoe" consider preaching and praying us
something quite neWY-n craze OF the 18th
oenturyf-a modern whim introduced with a
new cut Of the coat or style Of hatl His in
telligcnce' Is, indeed, very old-tashioned; de-
Cidcdly antiquarian for 80 young man.
Doesn't he really know that praying is older
than history
Then, in Conclusion. he says, he "wiu work
with muscle and brain for the same compen-
satton given by the city for muscle only"