Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1880-10-29
Elderly Male Flirt.

born to keep perpetual holiday. not to
become the slave of any woman. So
be has roamed from flower to flower,
Shipping the sweets of each. Probably
be has made love some hundreds we
might, perhaps, be justified in writing
thousands-of times; but nothing has
h resulted from his devotion to tho fair
sex except legions OF kisses, myriads
of surreptitious squeezes, and hosts of
hopes never to be realized. Glorying
in the fact TINT he is regular killer"
of the fair sex, he has stOrmed many q
virgin heart, not with any serious OBJ.
iect, but simply in order to crafty his
inordinate vanity and minister to his
perverted taste. He is like true con
sueror. His cOnquests do not satisfy
, him long. Having carried the citadel
of some fair maidens affections, and
thoroughly laid it waste, he rejoices to
leave it in its desolatior, while he
"seeks fresh fields and pastures new .
to ravage and destroy. 1t does not &C.
cur to him to look behind and con
template the wrecks that he has made
/, Blase and not too moral sometimes he
varies what may be termed his respect
able nirtations by amours of not re-
spectacle character considers that
the game of love is one which may be
played raany times and with many
partners, aud that no wellconstituted
mind will grieve over the forfe;ts Incl
dental to the fascinating diversion
He knows that when he has to perform
on the second fiddle in the presence of
more successful rival he feels deeply
mortified, and that the charms of the
= fair enslaver in question increase a
J! hundredfold in his eyes. But he would,
possibly, feel equally mortified if he
got thoroughly bsa,en in II billiard
match or was bowled for "a duck "
while playing ut cricket. The element
of genuine affection does not enter into
the matter at all, and he is ready to
console himself on the first opportunity
and will, in his next triumph, forget
about his present humiliation. Thus,
it will readily be seen that the terms on
which he plays with innocent girls,
whose principal characteristics are
their thoughtlessness, their giddiness.
4 their impulsiveness, and their readi-
! ness to believe anything which we'll
favored man may say to them, are I'M
equal, and that it would, in many
cases, be good thing if he could now
and then be placed under IL pump and
have the graceful contour of his curled
locks destroyed by liberal applica-
ton of cold water.
y Up to o certain point the career Of
the elderly male tiirt is composed of u
series of successes. An ordiLary
every day TT CT lover, who blushes,
and s.umbles, and blunders in the con
ventional stereo.ypcd way, and whose
great characteristic is that he is very
much in earnest, frequently has very
little chance against him. He is full
OF neat compliments and fine phrases,
he is quick to seize opportunities, he is
gallant in his bearing, and there is
about him u certain audacity winch is
not ithout its charm to tho feminine
/ mind. SO it is not surprising that he
becomes the burning and shining light
of many picnic and the beau Of many
ballroom. But, even when such u
happy lot befalls him, he will be care
fal that the general company shall not
see his grandest performances. His
principal feats will he performed in
shady corners. and in cool retreats
away from the glare and the glitter of
gaslights.
Buta day of reckoning comes for the
elderly male nirt as it does for all ether
!, Offenders against good tasts and pro.
7 priety. He loses, in large measure,
his power to charm He b,c,mes stiff
about the joints, and slow ana lnele.
CANT in action. Lines develop them
selves on his face in such way that
when he attempts to ogle a girl his
| countthance assumes a grotesQue, ii
not positively malevolent, appearance.
Gray hairs display themselves among
his carefully trimmed locks and whis-
kers. u bald patch exhibits itself on
the top of his head, and one of his
front teeth wickedly takes its departure
The extreme juvenility Of the raiment
which he affects seems to render still
clearer the fact that he has passed into
the period of the sere and yellow leaf.
But though when he is "got up" his
appearance is calculated to excite ridi
Guile rather tnan admiration, he still
affects the gsyeties aud the love. max
ings OF his youth. When no goes a.
merry making with parties of bachelors
|. and spinsters, there is something ex-
tremely incongruous in his appearance.
The general impression is that he has
had his day, that he is only doing
again what he has done hundreds Of
times before, and that if he were we'll
advised he would devote himself to
more sensible occur atoms. Many of
those whom he essays to charm laugh at
him; others good naturally tolerate
him, but leave his side ON the first OPP
portunity; others cruelty snub him !;
and others do not disguise that they
regard his polite advances as go many
impertinenccs which they would feel
thankful to be spared. One moment
fair hands, instigated by masculine
tempters, will pelt him with missiles
the next they will hide his hat; and in
variety of other ways he will be made
the object Of small. prosecutions. The
wonderful part of the matter is that he
is not taught wisdem. But he is I'M
worthy of pity, and it would not be
worth while to give him advice.
CopFIsIr A biz fish is most profit