Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1880-10-16
NO BITTERNESS.
The Quiet Way in Which Two
Old Gentlemen Discussed Poll.

Old Gentlemen Discussed Poll.
ties.
Petroleum World.
Grandfather Lickshingle and Deacon
Radspianer, two patriarchs in this COM
munity, were walking down the street
together Yesterday. Ii was remarked
that two such venerable men were not
worry often seen together, and the peo-
pie raised their hats TO them as they
passed along and spoke to them rev.
erently.
There's entirely too much bitterness
in this campaign, Deacon" said Mr..
Lickshingle, "and regret it exceeding.
IN. Now, when we wuz young men,
and took an interest in politics, We had
none OF this ere eveslastin' cat-haul-
in'.'
Indeed We hadn't" acquiesccd Dea-
con Rsdspinner. Take Jsckson's cam +.
pdign for instance. There wuz lively
interest taken by both parties, but there
wuz none OF yer bullyraegin' like We see
nowadays"
That's fact, Deacon" said Lick
shingie, but between you and me
never thought much of Jackson"
ale wGz mighty good man, Lick
shingle."
"lie lit duels and run Off with another
mans wife. He wuz small potatoes
compared to some men We have now,
Deacon"
"Who do you mean?" demanded the
Deacon.
well, there's Garfield" said Lick
shingle.
Garfield he hanged. You know
mighty well, Lickshiugle, he could not
have been 'lected hog-reeve in a hill
town in Jackson's day." replied the
Deacon.
"Iie's darn sight better man than
Hancock. who doesn't know nothing
about politics"
Go slow, Lickshingle, 20 slow" said
the Deacon.
ooh, know what am talkin' about"
r1tor,ed Lickshipgle, as he stabbed the
pavement spitetully with his hickory
cane. Hancock's a Stoughton-bottle, so
he is"
And what's Garfield? Great guns,
what's Garfield? Didn't he lay
Cheap-John sort Of pavement around
the Capitol and charge the Government
81. COO, 900 for it," and the Democratic
Deacon's eyes blazed with great indig-
nation.
''See here, Deacon, Look at yonr
man HancCck's letter TO Sherman. lie
tried To blow up Washington with some
glycerine. Say, didn't heP Oh, read
the papers, old man, an know what is
gOin' on.
"Hancock'sa good an pure man.
Didn't he fight like bulldog in the war
OF the Rebeilion2 Where wuz Garfield
skulkin' in the time OF disaster? In
Canady, by thunder, in Canady," said
the Deacon.
What wuT Hancock doin' with
siiletto in his boot the night Lincoln
wuz murdered? Answer me that. II
Wilkes Booth had failed this Hancock
wuz ready to finish the job. Don't talk
To mP,'
Its liew howled the Deacon, as
he whirled around and faced Lickshin-
Gle.
Its as true as holy writ, an any
man : liar that SAYS so. retorted Lick
shingle, too much wrought up to be par
ticular az to his phraseology.
You're bald.headed old Radical
scouudrel ~
You're q id old Copperhead, an
can wipe tho ground with you,' said
Lickshingle.
Friends jumped in, and the two furi-
ous old men were dragged away in OPP
posite directions. The Deacon squirm-
ed around in the arms of his captors,
shook his cane at Lickshingle, and hiss
ed:
Your man Garfield would never
have gone into the army ii he hal not
been drafted, and he would not then,
only he thought he woul be able to de-
scrt-the ornery son OF gun"