The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1880-07-06

Tells . Basoo Reporter How
"Jspan Was the Finest Country
in the world Before the
Missionaries Came"

He wxs . wexther-besien, middie-zge
man. wearing . resolute face, carved b
Cares chisel. Yet. still. bearing deeply i'm
lpreaaesi in the wrinkles around the mout
the foot prints of laughter. and over ever
facial feature cheerfulness had erected il
tents and encxmped. On his head ~
jauntily SLOUGH hat. through the crow
of which the sun hesms poured in unbro
ken rays. A blue saiior-collared shir
covered by light blouse, through the bac
and sleeves Of which the per-ev-ring claw
Of hard times had scratched holes, tried Z
cover his body, while his Iegs were covere
BY pair of jeans pants. badly Periorste
BY Time having jabbed his fingers throsg
them, and patched BY divers colored mate
rails until they looked like Gar6elds recon
will look, after the republican newspaper
and orators have ell postered their apollo
gies. excuses and pslliations over thos
holes 10 his record. made BY Salary Grat
De Golyer Pavement and Credit Mobilier'
fraudulent fingers.
His best scqusinted friends will ecarcel,
be able to tell what color the original sr
ticle vas, when il started into the patching
up transformstion. So il vii be viii
Garfield. So il wss With this pair o.
psn.s. He was leaning. yesterday evening
about 6:45 o'clock, on that iron railing ia
front Of the BAzoo Office, wearing . pen.
sive, thoughtful look, that . man uncon.
sciously draws over his face when he be.
gins to believe that the world end he orc
not on good terms and that in fact this
world is shout fourth rate one IN quality
- it il in magnitude. and that God Al
mighty hadn't done the square thing ~
him when he showed him "a into this in
ferior planet to be born instead of turning
him loose in some of the hieh-clovered,
richly -rstioned planets Of 6rst-class size
and quality. The shove described kind of
q mood had hung its shingle out over HE
face, when . BAzOo reporter came along
hungry for news; be had followed drunk.
en- man sixteen blocks in the hope Of reeing
an arrest, in vain, for the drinkers friends
steered him clear Of police. He had hung,
open-mouthed,f for two houn over discu--
sion between Gsr6eIder and Hancocker
in hope Of seeing . 6st fight. but they
avoided II BY agreeing that the newspaper
reports Of their candid .tes were false, and
thst reporter was rsvenou-Iy hungry for
news. He had applied his news pump to
everybody he met On the street in vain;
everything seemed to be going dry. The
pump sucker a be worked the handle and
getting no news began, a. pumps going dry
will, wheeling like horse that Is worried
BY heaves. The reporter ran up to this
man and scco-ted him, saying:
my friend, you look tired: won't you
come in and sit down and rest yourself7"
He accepted the bid and threw himself
YEARLY on chair in the RAzoo Office. The
said:
"From your sailor shirt and rolling gait
and ruddy complexion would guess you
a son Of the ses. Am I correciT
"You are right, my FRIEND" he said, 81
have spent several years on the waters and
visited many couniries."
"From what Won have seen, what country
among the many Won have visited would
You advi-e young man To move 10 il he
wanted to grow uP with the country and
get rich p asked the reporter.
"Japsn, my child, is the best country
under the sun. or above the sun either"
aid he. "Why. you would be aston
-hed," ne continued, "to zee how rapidly
fruits, vegetable and cereals mature in
Japan. l vac there in 1857 on the sail
.hip 'Lacknov.' One evening I stood on
4 gentle decIivity and looked out as far ~
The eye reached. Oa every aide Was trees
dressed in the most beautiful folisge, fruit
Trees bowling to the earth under the loads
Of fruits which bounteous nature had piled
On their shoulders, and grain Vas growing
10 rapidly aud heavy that it was crowding
The fences out into the Highways in reach
ing for room. 1; seemed to me like the
provision and fruit store of the Gods. And
natures 40 quickly. As /
stood gaziog At that enrsp,urinR scene ano
wishing that had . chunk Of that soil
and climate dug up and carried across the
ocean and sat down near ST. Louis or some
good market, I picked an orange
from tree and began eating il. Our ship
expected to make voyage and return to
the port near where stood in about ten
and the idea struck me that I
would plant m orange seed and remember
it, and ascertain bow rapidly it grew By
looking At it on my return 1t the end Of ten
months. placed . seed in the ground.
spread nv handkerchief over il 10 mark
the place where it VA, and TO prevent the
chickens and dogs from scratching il up.
until could walk about one hundred
yards and get some water to moisten the
earth With about it. I returned With the
water in about ten minusea. and. cir. that
seed had grown to . fuil-sizsd tree, laden
With oranges - big - tea cup, and very
luscious oranges, too. end ny hsndkerchief,
I had to climb the tree to get It Of the
top limbs. The handkerchief vas Q
silk one my d ar old mother had given
me in Eael.nd and ] prised it highly. I
had great difficulty in getting it. - the
twigs on which it Va spread ran out away
above the heavier branches. But that rap
i'd growth of the orange 10 nothing; yog
ought to see the cucumber grow in japan
I took cucumber SEED and planted j,
started TO walk away 70 eet . drink Of -
YER. The cucumber sproutsd at ooc
through the ground an took after me.
saw 1t coming an took to my heels.
"a