The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1880-10-21
Nartetu.
VARIETY SCRAPS.
Free Of charge-An empty gun.

VARIETY SCRAPS.
Free of charge-An empty gun.
Bad buy Words-"Oharge Il TO me-"
The writing masters business is lourlshiDg.
II Is not assault and battery to strike a match.
A pair ofsuspenders-A couple OF hangmen.
Highway men-the elevated railway compan
ies
The man who holds q loan hand-the pawn.
broker.
The game that two can't play at-threehanded
euchre.
In buying stocks remember that all is not Gould
that glltters.
The most ill.used objects In the world are eggs
Everybody beats EN-.
History does not relate that Adam and Eve OBJ
tanned their sweets by raising cane.
The difference between Courtney and an oyster
is that he is not good in half shell.
Two Of kiud-twins.-salem Sunbeam. Not
always Boy and girl sometimes,
Thirteen at table is unlucky Shen there is din
ner enough for only ten.
TAX about bull in china shop, why, we seen
u cowhide III school room.
Phde hath two seasons. A forward spring and
an early fall
An opera singer cannot only sing airs, but she
eau put them on.
The watch lacks selfrespect 1t is always trying
to run itself down,
A Partisan play is entitled my Mothers Eye
glass" OF course 1t is a spectacular piece.
Kerosene IL going up" says an exchange. 1t
is attended by servant girls, probably.
Mr., Moody isn't man Of the world or he'd a.
known better than to have tackled 81. Louis.
Why is Zulu belle like prophet Of oldV Be-.
cause she has not much oner in her own coun
try.
contemporary calls sitting down on a wasp
an experiment Il strikes us as Pretty sure
Thing.
No matter how prosperous their business may
be, whalers and lard makers always have trying
times.
II was the man who was arrested for Stealing a
mirror who discovered that he had glass too
much.
A cur that no one will owns will get a tin kettle
over given distance as quickly as 500 import
ed dog will
The reason Rhode Island has two capitals is
that nobody would like TO spell 1t rhode Island or
Rnooe island
Man has two places where he can keep his trea.
sure. His pocket can hold his dollars and his
head his sense.
A Sunday school Miss was asked what must
people do in order to 90 to heaven2' die, sup.
pose," replied the little one.
To err is human, but to refuse to drop into the
collection basket the leaden nickle with which
you have beeu stuck is divine.
Money is a golden breasted bird with silver
oeak, says Talmage. Aud a greenbaCk, adds
the Philadelphla Bulletin.
1t is hard to dIstl guish the pictures Of old Faith
or Time from those OF Roscoe Conkllng, both Lay
Ing their hair banged alike,
new paper called Woman has been started In
Paris. lis male list will undoubtedly be large 4
It's make W is attractive.
The Rochester EX press encourages Anna Dick
inson To 90 on writing plays, because when she II
doug that she isn't acting them.
Susan B, Anthony has just celebrated her TWEEN
| " second birthday Flee Press Does this meal
LnsL she was born on the 29En OF FeDruary1
An Indianapolis firm is engaged in canning
minCe meat. The label on the eau should be
uiu uhtmAT Te nniEpd In mid.air and avprv ma W A o
ing.
Nobody expects any Congressman to distinguish
himself for the hTst Two weeks. After that 1t 1
expected that they will throw their whole sou
into here" al oil call.
Now that Glasgow chemist has produced
| cTyslahzed Garbous which are verta ole diamond
there is a chance OF coal neaVer becoming as BIZ
Il man as a motel clerk.
An English paper advertlses book entitled
The Amateur POacner" Something in the wa!
OF "HinLs to Young Burglars" aud The Complet
FOrger" may soon be expected,
A boy Is Father proud OF the blisters his hand
| get by rowing, but let one little one come o
WOod.spliJting, and on, murder how 1t doe
hurt.
A little fellow who was asked how John tn
Baptist was clothed, answered, In Coarse gar
ments Of Camels hair eight lOCusts and will,
money"
II would box your ears" said young lady b
her stupid aud tiIesome admirer, ii" Il
whall he anxlOusly inquired, "lf l could get
box large enough for the purpose" she replied
Would you like to wash your hands befor
dinner2' asked the host, pointing to the conven
iences mo, certainly not" responded the guest
"Great Scott man, DO you suppose eat Will
my fingers.