The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1880-01-28
Prof. Spectrum on Light,

l.,
MY HEARERs-There are great many
kinds of light, sunlight moonlight, stas-
light, candle-llght, lamp-light, electric
light, headlight and lis hit IN the head,
and lighthouses, a specimen Of which I
see before me tonight But no matter. +
can throw light upon my subject Just the
same unless you all light OUT Sunlight
is the best, as it is the Oh "a pest light
known at present. It is misnomer to
call the sun light in one sense. hawever,
as that luminary weighs millions and
millions of tons more than our earth does.
1t is disputed point were tfe sun gets
its light in the first place. Some think
it gets it from
An auditor-"C Combustion
frof.-I'll come bust yin the nose n
you interrupt me again. Who's giving
this lecture, any way2 Some hold to the
theory that the sun is an immense pan
of fire
Boy sticks his head in the door and
yells "Fire!'
Prof-That's bawl of fire that you
needn't pay any attention to, nv hearers.
Others think it is mere transparent
shell, with big bonfire in the middle
like candle in q jack-o'lantern. Still
there are others with theory that the
sun has no light or heat of its own, but
is gigantic mirror, as it were, thar gath
crs and reflects light IRON mill.eus of
stars all around it. Not so unreasonable
theory either, when we consider the
amount Of light material there is in Con-
gress at the present time, and allowing
that the other plants are alike literally
endowned. .13.4
Moonlight comes second, though many
susceptible young people prefer 1t to day
light. 1t is better for wandering in.
Courtship is very largely made up OF
moonshine. The moon horrows ITS light
from the sun, and the reason 1t never paws
1t back is because it is often reduced
down to its last quarter. 1t is sometimes
)claimed that the moon is made Of
"Cheese it'll"
Plof-The moon-eyed leper who ut
| tered that disgusting sentiment is marked,
and his season ticket will not admit him
TO any other lecture in the course. T
cancel the ticket. .r-.,
swell, it you can sell the ticket it
| more than I can do, and have offered it
| for MCKEE" .s-.ssE.s
Prot.-I will now proceed to consider
other kinds of light. There is starlight.
That IS furnished by the stars when the
moon is indisposed or under q cloud.
Juliet wanted to cut Romeo up into lit
tie stars when he died, which leads me
to say Shakespeare has been terribly cut
up by little stars =.
Old lady in the fundamentally staYsp.
Prof.-No more yours than ours, nay
dear madam. Candle light and lamp
light you know all about. Gaslight is
one of the most peculiar commodities In
the world. 1t has the faculty of running
you in debt when It is all turned off,
Like Interests, 1t never stops accumulat-
ing. Lock up your house, go away for
months and your bill for gas comes in On
your return at just the same old figures,
a trltle more if anything. I know man
who had all the gas pipes removed from
his house, and one dark night he took
the meter and buried it in the back yard.
Several weeks after gas man who was
passing along the alley next to the house
smclt something familiar, and lie went
digging about in the backyard until he
urearthed the meter. Then he examin-
ed it critically, put down some mysteri-
GUS figures in a notebook, made little
calculation and away. The next day a
bill was sent to my friend from the gas
office: charging him with $3e4s worth
of gas consumed since the meter had
been buried. Although a gas bill is a
bill for light it is not light bill.
A vo1cc--"Ain't you of rather light
bull for lect urer?'
Prof.-You will find me heavy enough
it tackle you once. But despise your
sneering comments. Besides, that l can
afford to be deaf to your light remarks,
l have got your money. I would tell you
about the electric light, but have pro-
fessional repugnance to trespass1ng up
on the field of a brother show man. For
particulars you must wait for the ap-
pearance OF Prof. Edison, who will soon
be in the lecture field himself and tell
you all about it.