The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1880-09-21

COHpOSeu prlnClpally OF farmers, III
Gratiot County. In order to win the
confidence Of his hearers, no said, "My
| friends, my sympathies have always
been with the tillers of the soil. My
father was a practical farmer, and so
was my grandfather before him. I was
myself reared on farm, and was, so to
speak. born between two stalks Of
corn"
Here the speaker was rudely inter-
rupted by some one In the audience,
who exclaimed, "a pumpkin BY Jingo"
The origin OF the saying, "Taking a
man down Il peg" may be traced to the
pegging, or making the drinking cups,
TO check the Incorporate haOtts of the
times. by preventing one man from
taking larger draught than his COM
panions. But the device proved the
| means of increasing the evil 1t was in
tended to remedy for the most abstemi-
Gus were required to drink precisely to
peg or pin, whether they could soCer-
~ take such a quantity or not. 10 tho
use Of such cups may also be traced the
origin OF the saying, "He's a peg too
low"
How absolu . Some people are in
their conversation! There is Smart
fngton, for instance, said Jones to him,
the other evening, "Do you like dogs p"
Jones, by the way, is lover Of the an
una. smai: a.+,n 81 meyer H ate one" replied
supposed you did? exclaimed Jones
with Impotence. eff wore to ask it
you liked donkey, now?" he continued,
with alInger,ng emphasis on donkey:
SAID Smartington ingenuously, "I like
you, JONES'"
BROWNS landlady passed him dish
OF vegetables at the dinner table and
he helped himself to about two spoon
fuls, almost bankrupting the dish, when
she sai! to him, with smile on her
face and Ire in her eye: "Those are
new potatoes. Mr.. Brown, and some Of
the other boartlers may want some."
"Beg your PARDON" choked Brown,
IN surprise. as two or three effected an
unpleasant lodgment in his windpipe {;
~ thought they were peas" and then
he finished his dinner hurrriedly.
Brown is now hunting around for an
other boarding place.
SOMEBODY has been trying his hand
Oh the word "habit," and he works 1t
out thus: "uabit" is hard to over
come. you take OF the first letter it
does not change "a Bit" If you take
on another you still have "bit" left.
II you take off still another the whole
Of "it' remains. You take off another
1t Is not ct" totally used mp. All OF
which goes to show that If you want to
get rid OF habit you must throw it off
altogether.
SHE had q pretty diploma tied with
PINK RIBBON, from one our best young
ladies' colleges. In conversation with
a daring and courageous young man,
after he had detailed the dangers and
delights Of riding on locomotive. she
completely upset his opinion Of inde-
pendent education Of the sexes by in
qniriDg; I'll ow do they steer locomo-
tivcs, anyhow?'
a QUAKER gentleman riding in a
carriage, with fashionable lady deck
ed with profusion OF jcwelry, heard
her complain of a cold. Shivcring in
her lace bonnet and shawl as light as a
cObweb, she exclaimed: "WhaU shall
| do to get warm?' "I really don't
know" replied the Quaker, solemnly,
'un!ess thee put OH another breast
pin''
Two Galveston Indies met one day re-
N.Y. why" I,n1 lolio"iHS conFersa-
tion ensued: "Why, do you know what
l heard about you?'' "i've no idea"
"l heard that when your husband was
sick and not expected 70 live, you went
to picnic.' "It's n vile slander: it
was only an excursion"
OLD Mrs. Skittleworth kon't know
why people will make counterfeit
money. She says, "I tried to pass
bad half dollar q dozen times the other
day, but nobody would have it," and
she thinks 1t waste of time to make
such stuff.
THAT was Il CHASTITY joke that a sinful
townsTan played on stranger, who
lie had promised to introduce to rich
planter, and then took him around and
presented him to the leading under
taker.
P1oUs old lady: "Just think, Rose,
only five missionaries to twenty thou
sand cannibals !" Kind hearted niece:
Good gracious. the poor cannibals will
starve to death aG that rate"
"LENNY, you're pig" said a father
to his little five year old boy. Now do
you know what pig is, Lenny?
"Ycs sir, pigs hogs little boy"
THE individual who saw a mouse
fighting with piece of Limbureer
cheese readily realized that the battle
Is not always to the strong.
TIE shark fs the most sOciable of
fish. lie never calls upon bathcr
without wanting to stop and take q
bite.
a GENTLEMAN in lecturing for blind
asylum began by gravely remarking,
"lf all the world were blind, what Il
melancholy sight It would be.'
srSsuGss111.Ase~nas<sDeAs
IIo Sill Lives.
Some years ago DR.. II. V. Pierce, Of
the Worlds Dispcnsary and invaiids'
Hotel, Of Buffalo, n. y, and London,
was sent for to examine q terrible dis
ease OF the khee-joint, resulting in
liberation and extensive slough,ng of
the bone and tissues. The mau's lile
had been dcspaired Of by tho previous
attendants. AnputatiOn at the thigh
was promptly decided upon and Skill
III Il I>,x ~