Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1880-03-04
Aamuruus department.
A BRAKEMAN At CHURCH,
From the Burlington Hawkeye.


senger reading General Grants Tour Around
the World" and wondering why "Green's Au-
gust Flower" should be painted above the
doors of "A Buddhist Temple at Benares"
To me came the brakeman, and seating him
self on the arm of the seat, said:
II went to church yesterday"
"Yes?" I said, with that interested inaec.
ton that asks for more. "And what church
did you attend ?"
(Which do you guessf' heasked.
"Some union mission church," hazarded.
"No," he said, II don't like to run on
these branch roads very much. I don't often
60 to church. and when do, | want to run
on the main line, where your run is regular
and you 60 on schedule time and don't have
to wait on connections. don't like to run
ON branch. Good enough, but don't like
it."
episcopal ?" guessed
Limited express" said he, "all palace cars
and two dollars extra for seat, fast time and
only stop at the big stations. Nice line, but
too exhaustive for brakeman. All train.
men in uniform, conductors punch and Ian
tern silver. plated, and no train boys allowed.
Then the passengers are allowed to talk back
at the conductor, and it makes them too free
and easy. No, couldn't stand the palace
cars. Rich road, though. Don't often hear
of receiver being appointed for that line
Some mighty nice people travel on it, too"
"Universalst ?" suggested.
Broad gauge" said the brakeman "does
too much complimentary business. Every.
body travels on pass. Conductor doesn't
get fare once in fifty miles. Stops at all
flag stations, and won't run into anything but
a union depot. No smoking car on the train,
Train orders are rather vague, though, and
the train men dent get along we'll with the
passengers No, I don't 60 the Universalists,
though know some awful good men who run
on that road"
"Presbyterian ?" I asked.
marrow gauge, eh p said the brakeman !;
"pretty track, straight as rule tunnel right
through mountain rather than 60 around it;
spirit level grade; passengers have to show
their ticket before they get on the train
Mighty strict road, but the cars are a little
narrow have to sit one in seat, and no room
in the aisle to dance. Then there is no stop
over tickets allowed; got to 60 straight to the
station you're ticketed for or you can't get on
! at all. When the cars full, no extra coaches;
cars built at the shops to hold just so many
and nobody else allowed Oh. But you don't
often hear of an accident on that road. It's
run right up to the rules"
maybe you Joined the Free Thinkers p
"Scrub road,"' said the brakeman; "dirt
road bed and no ballast no time card and no
train dispatcher. All trains run wild and
every engineer makes his own time, just as he
pleases. Smoke if you want to; kind of a
go.as. you please road. Too many side tracks,
and every switch wide open all the time, with
the switchman sound asleep and the target
lamp dead out. Get on as you please and
get off when you want to. Don't have to show
your tickets, and the conductor isn't expect
ed to do anything but amuse the passengers.
No, sir; l was offered pass, but don't like
the line. don't like to travel on q road that
has no terminus. Do you know, sir, asked
adivision superintendent where that road runs
to, and he said he hoped to die if he knew.
I asked him if the general superintendent
could tell me, and he said that he didn't be
lieve they had general superintendent, and
if they did, he didn't know anything more
about the road than the passengers. | asked
him who he reported to, and he said nobody"
asked conductor who he got orders from,
and he said he didn't take orders from any
living man or dead ghost. And when | ask.
ed the engineer whom he got his orders from,
he said he'd like to see anybody give him or
ders he'd run that train to suit himself, or
, he'd run it into the ditch. Now, you see, sir
I'm q railroad man, and don't care to run
on, fhot boc l,
tiops, runs nowhere, and has no superinten-
dent. 1t may be all right, but I've railroad
dtoo long to understand it."
MAYBE you went to the Congregational
church?' said.
Popular road" said the brakeman "an
old road, too-one of the very oldest in the
country. Good roadbed and comfortable
cars Well managed road, too: directors
don't interfere with division superintendent
and train orders. Roads mighty popular,
but it's pretty independent, too. Yes, didn't
one of the division superintendent down east
discontinue one of the oldest stations on this
line two or three years ago? But it's mighty
pleasant road to travel on. Always has such
splendid class of passengers
ibid you try the Methodist ?" I said
"Now you're shouting" he said, with some
enthusiasm. "Nice road, eh ?" Fast time
and plenty Of passengers. Engines carry
power of fsteam, and don't you forget it, steam
gauge shows hundred and enough all the
time Lively road; and when the conductor
shouts all aboard you hear him to the next
station. Every train light shines like head.
light. Stop-over checks are given on all
through tickets passenger can drop off the
train as often as he likes, do the station two
or three days and hop on the next revival
train that comes laundering along. Good
whole souled companionable conductors amt
a road in the country where the passengers
feel more at home. No passes every passen
ger pays full traffic rates for his ticket. Wes-
leyanhouse air brake on all trains, too pretty
safe road, but didn't ride over it yesterday"
perhaps you tried the Baptists ?" l guess
ed once more.
"Ah, hap said the brakeman, "Shes
daisy, amt she? River road; beautiful
curves sweep around anything to keep close
to the river, but it's all steel rail and rock
ballast, single track all the way, and not
side track from the round house to the termi-
nus. Takes heep of water to run it through,
double tanks at every station, and there amt
an engine in the shops that can pull pound
or run mile with less than two gauges. But
it runs through lovely country; these river
roads always do; river on one side, hills on
the other, and it's steady climb up the grade
all the way till the run ends where the foun.
tain head of the river begins. Yes, sir, I'll
take the river road every time for lovely
trip; sure connections and good time, and no