The daily gazette., 1880-02-12
Twain and pan peouIIIe.


TYPOGRAPHICAL SEDAN.
From the Carson Appeal.
It was nearly twenty years ago when
Dan DeQuille and Mark Twain at
tempted to start paper in Mendocino
County. They took the type and ma
terial Of their recently defunct news
paper establishment in San Francisco,
and loading the stuff on a big wagon,
struck out into the country to retrieve
their fortunes. They packed their type
Just as it stood in the forms, tied up
the articles with stout cords by pro
cess well known to printers, and pack
ing them closely in boxes, vowed to
establish newspaper somewhere
which would be the leading exponent
of politics and history for the Pacific
Coast. Had not an unfortunate cir
cumstance taken place it is quite evil
dent that the same newspaper which
they contemplated founding would
have been alive to-day. Their journey
over the mountains was utterly une-
ventful until they reached Simpsons
Station, a spot well known 10 old trav-
elers on that route. Here they met a
party of emigrants making for Lower
California, and the latter had with
them small mountain howitzer which
they had brought with them across
the plains.
Twain took a great fancy to this gun,
and offered $50 for it with two kegs of
powder thrown in. The emigrants
were glad enough to part with it, as
they concluded the time for its use had
passed. Dan thought the purchase of
the artillery and military supplies was
reckless piece of extravaganza and
said as much, but Twain replied :.
"When we start our paper we must
fire salute. A newspaper Office with
artillery has big bulge on the bust
ness. No well-regulated Office in Cal
ifornia should be without bowitzer.
If man comes in for retraction we
can blow him into the next county.
The howitzer goes"
This silenced the argument, and the
next day the two journalists took the
road with their printing outfit and ar
tillery.
On the next night they camped in a
mountain ravine fifteen miles from
Simpsons, and after building the usual
camp fire fell asleep. About II o'clock
the horses awakened them by pranoing
about, and the two journalists were led
to the conclusion that nothing less than
a party of Indians were making arrange
ments for night attack. In the clear
moonlight they could be distinguished
about half mile away at the foot Of the
ravine. The idea of encountering In
dians had never entered the heads Of the
two fortune seekers, and they had no
arms. Suddenly Twain frightened up,
reInarking:
"TLe howitzer."
"We've got nothing but powder" said
Dan.
"Well, powder'll scare 'em, and we'll
load her up"
The piece was Immediately loaded
with good big charge and the two men
felt quite certain that the Indians hear
Ing the roar Of he gun would beat an
unconditional retreat. The piece was
hardly loaded and placed In position,
when about fifty of the redskins came
charging up the ravlne. -
Twain seized brand from the camp
fire and ives about to lay it on the touch
hole, when Dan yelled "Hold on" as he
rammed something into the mouth of
the piece, and remarked:
"Turn 'er loose"
The roar of the howitzer echoe d
through the lonely forests and the saw
ages, with frantic cries of pain, reeled
down the ravine in wild confusion.
"What in h-ll did you put IMP" ask
ed Mark.
"a column of solid nonpareil and
couple of sticks of your spring poetry"
The poetry did the business, Dan.
Get one of your geological articles ready
for the next charge and guess it'll let
the red devils out of the psesent cam
paign."
The savages again advanced. Mark
attended to the powder and Dan sorted
the shot, so to speak.
"Jeems Pipes song, my Mountain
Home.'"
"Good for three Indians; sock'er in"
"An acrostic by John b. Ride In long
primer"
"lt'll paralyze 'em."
"Frank Pixley on the Constitution,
half a column of loaded BREWER"
'lf it hits 'em the day is won."
"Your leader ON Law and Order"
"Save it as last resort"
Dan pulled the type out of the boxes
and stuffed column after column in the
howitzer's mouth as the savages came
charging on. Another round from the
gun and the redskins rolled over and
over each other like boulders swept
away by mountain cloud-burst.
Mark, in an ecstasy of delight pulled
an American flag out of his effects, nail
ed it to the tail-board of the wagon and
was about to make speech, when the
dusky figure of the foe were once more
seen moving to the attack.
The piece was again loaded, and this
time with double charge. Marks
leader on "Law and Order" the puff of
an auction house by Fred McCrelish
(stwas a sickner, ,"aDan said), Frank
Gross verses on "Ihe Rebel Yell" an
agricultural article by Sam Sebaugh,
showing the chemical properties of cor n
Juice as an educational lever, a maiden
DO, tical effort of Olive Harper, and
some verses by Col. Cremeny and Frank
Soule completed the load.
"That poetry, reaching 'em first, will
throw 'em into confusion, and my edi-
torlal, coming upon the heels of the rest,
will result in a lasting decentralization.
1t will be like the last cavalry charge
of the French at the battle of Auster-
litz."
For the third and last time the faith
full howitzer belched its typographical