Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1880-08-29
GUSHING.

It seems perfectly natural for some
people to gush.
They are boiling springs, SO full that
they must run over.
They gush on every occasion, and
wonder how you can be so cool about
| everything They do not think you
have any feelings at all. You never
show any!
How delighted they are with every
thing All the days are splendid All
the people are so delightful All the
sights they see are charming. All the
singers are such heavenly warblers
All the women are angels and all the
men have such elegant mustaches!
Every object can be gushed over.
Last summer one of the gushers-a
young lady-was riding with us, and we
came upon drove of pigs. Our friend
went into ecstasies at once. $50 charm
ing! so cunning so wonderful so
strange that they could be made into
ham and eggs! and sausage ! and spare
rib {! and such an elegant curl in their
tails /" and she told the pig-driver that
they were "ittle darlings p and got the
indignant reply:
"No, they amt. They're Berkshires,
and as big of their age as any pigs you
ever see. Bet you dollar on it |"
Somehow the sympathy Of the public
generally with the gushers.
They are SO ingenious, and so simple
hearted! So free from guile ! Like
Truthful James, so "child-ike and
bland p
It is always good thing to gush over
popular preacher. Everybody adj
mres devotion, if they do not confess it,
and it always makes people think well
of you if you praise their minister's SER
mon. Nothing like approaching your
friends minister. It is tho next-best
thing to admiring your friends baby.
And there is nothing better to gush
over than baby. Call it the dearest,
sweetest, knowingest, most bewitching
baby in the universe, and all its near
relatives will believe you, and nobody
will think you are exaggerating except
the woman next door, who had baby
about the same time the other one was
born, and who knows that her baby is
the brightest and handsomest baby on
the footstool!
It is good thing to gush at funerals.
If you see anybody cry join in yourself,
and cry, if possible, harder than the best
Of them! It will please the mourners to
see how much you thought Of the dead
man; it will almost reconcile them to
the necessity Of having a funeral, be-
cause you show so much sympathy! It
tells everybody that you have heart to
feel for the woes of others and, when
charitable people go around with a
"paper" to get money to help the
widow and eight children, you will not
have to give anything! Is not sympathy
better than gold, especially to a lonely
widow with eight children to support ?
Nobody will expect you to give any
thing.
They will all remember how you
grshed at the funeral, and when you
tell the "paper" carrier that you have
just paid some bills and parted with
every cent Of your available cash, and
express your grief that it has "hap-
pened so,' if he is man with soul he
will believe you, and he will feel as if he
ought to put his hand in his pocket and
get you a quarter.
Not long ago young man of our &C
quaintance married spinster twice his
age, and uoss-eyed IN the bargain.
When asked why he did SO, he replied:
"Why, she cried SO when mother was
buried, and seemed SO cut up, that I
knew she had heart worth winning"
So, you see, that gushing can do a
great deal for the gusher.