The Newtown bee., 1880-12-01
Tha Village HateI Yaran,!n.


 After supper we march iilto the office in indian file, arm ourselves with poplar toothpSckS, and then all march out and take seats oa tn" hotel veranda and hold a convention. II you have never taken part in one Of these gatherings on the veranda ot village hotel you have missed good thing. The audience il- cludes every phase of human nature.
 The discls sion ually opens hetween the village biacksmith and farmer: and 1t starts on the weather.
 The b acksRith asserts that wa have had too much rain. The farmer can't agree The undertaken, w1o used to farm 1t, then joins in with the reu, ark ti,at ie has seen seasons when we had more raip, and seasons when we difn't have as much. Ttis alS out the shoc- maker, who can remember one year wuen it didn'. rain rom he twentieth of March to the Is, Of Cat brr. W ul C he Is trying to remember what year it was, the cooper tits a'Irk his chrir and asserts that he can distinctly recall a year in which it ralned every day from the first oi May tu tie middle ot Novem Der. He can remember iG all tue more distinctly because his iXther believed that cecund ceiuge WAS coming and spent two months try ing to mAke water tight No.h'& ark of the horse lrn. He cant tell sha exac' year with out going distance of six n lies to ex- amiBe some old do uents. but Father than have his wort diSpated, he wou,d willingly go to tlat trouble. No one doubts, him, however. and tie sits down to give room to the min whose tlree- year-o!d colt has bc en i;u puled on Il fence stake. and who wants g cure for the wound Here follows . discussion on horses, lasting fifteen minutes. and It IS abo"t to cross the me and take .lp mu e when s1 old man srlts over the heads of three boys in lire and eays:
 II don't know much about horses. but if had one, and ne should drive fence stake cle;ti through him, believe l should grease t.,e staSe and pick otf the slivers before pulled it out! l tell ye horses cant stand everything. TO more n a man can"
 Whatever new discussion might be creal Cd by this boli assertion is barred by the appearances of q villa-er who made the trip to California in overland days. No one kruws list how munh mon,J he brought back. The estimate runs all the way from two shilings to $20,' 0H, hut he i3 d's,-Tcetly silent aS 10 the "xact amount There is one thing Certain. however. He killed upward oi htty IndianI, G"7en ErI2zty t*itrs, una over a hundred tuaal1s while he was gone, and ilaS seLties the qu"stion ot his being niitl d 10 cumrlsnd the parade on the fourth Of July. 4 move is about to be madO tO draw him onL on wild Western scenes, wien somebody suddenly reCo ,ects that old Uncle J,'rry is lyinS at the point of death. Every body seems ,o ferl had for a III ment, and then it is remembered how he made, hIs wife go b r"iooled in winter, lent H whipned a yoke Of steers 10 death, and the tide s!owy turns. There is one question, however, On which all ur6 agreed. Uncle Jerry. during Lis palmy days, once siou,dtrrd a barrel of cider and carried it forty ods.
 es, and seed him do it." "sighs the old man behind me Fact oi it was, it was all on my account, and 1 beat him pretty bad. l was up to Fulltr's cider mill artFr 8 barrel ot the sweet, when Uncle Jerry came along with d buuncnx thrt year old St"er. We got to banterlng. and W ii aly agreed L'ab If could nit hIs steer "as Ia have him. and he was to have tEe cider II he c''uid shnu !feT 1t. | Con { kc,r to brag :Lr, Il Id now ih my old age, but l think lined that steer without wen grow E' rcd in the face Uncle Jerry turned as white as 8 sh. ct. and l tuuuSut ned faint away, but Ic s!u''R tb nIS WOrd, and took the sle,r nam He got Il heap O crrd 1t al. over the count} i"r Ii'liu' that cider, and never Ist on that l lifted tue steer, and that's one thing I've kinder laid up agin the old man"
 Then tLe next n4n lies about the nl m ber of crows he s+w in k4nsas, and 70 we go until it is harp ten o'clock anG the mosquitoes bcEin to hunger for evening Iuauh. Then they b.d each otLer go d-nil Int and separate to meet and lie again.-H 2 ts.2.