The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1880-03-22
sal. 1t acts at one and the same time
and every minute on all parts of the civ
ilized world.
Scottish HumOr.

StOtsHoA
Leisure Hour.1
1t is recorded by Chambers and other
Scottish historians that when Mrs. Sid
dons was in Edinburg, on the occasion of
her first appearance, the audience had
been, to English notions, singularly un-
demonstrative of their appreciation. Yet
during one scene the whole house was
held entirely spell-bound and breathless,
when there was heard distinctly from
the pit voice from some canny, cautious
Scotch critic, "You was no that bad;"
and at that word the whole Louise burst
forth into perfect tumult and uproar
Of applause.
A lady Of rank, a very dear friend of
the writer, herself Scotch woman of a
very old family, usually goes into the
housekeepers room every morning to
give her directions for the day to her
housekeeper, a daughter of Aberdeen.
Our friend has a considerable play of
humor and fun, and she has told us how,
more than once, after some humorous
remark, on the day following her house
keeper will say to her: "You was very
humorous thing ye're leddyship was
saying yesterday" 1t had taken twenty
four hours for the saying fairly to work
in the mind. .t
1t is no doubt owing to this queer
slowness in the character that we have
among Scottish anecdotes so many of
the ludicrous, which are not humorous.
A bailie of the Gorbals, Glasgow, was
noted for the simplicity Of his manners
on the bench. A youth was charged be-
fore his tribunal with abstracting a
handkerchief from gentleman's pocket.
The Indictment being read, the bailie,
addressing the prisoner, remarked: I
hae ma doot ye did the deed, for | had a
handkerchief ta'en oot O my ain pouch
pocket this vera week."
A good deal of the humor is just In the
shrewd simplicity Of reply. A Lon
don tourist met young woman going to
the kirk, and, as was not unusual, she
was carrying her boots in her hand and
trudging along barefoot.
"My girl" said he, "is it customary
for all Che people in these parts to go
barefoot%' ....r.... .,.., .
"Pairtly they do" said the girl, "and
PARTLY they mind their own business"
In tie town of Falkirk there lived q
very liTtdrious infdel who gloried i'm his
profanity. On one occasion he WAS de.
nouncing the absurdity of the doctrine
of original sin; and the beadle Of the
parish, perhaps, thought himself bound
officially to put in his word, although II the
other was socially his superior. ...
"Mr. H." said he, ''it seems to me that
you need ma fash (trouble) yourself about
original sin, for to my certain knowledge
YOU have as much akwal (actuaD sin al
will do your business"
The humors of the religious character
are among the most noticeable. To some
English readers the phraseology may bt
amusing from its quaintness, but lei
them remember that it is used with tht
most solemn reverence. A Scotchmar
would be equally amused with the seem
ing irreverence of "Jessica's First Prayer,
or of the words. of the worthy English
soldier, who in his prayer at the opening
of Mrs. DanielPs Home at Aldershot
said: "Lord, thou knowest what a fl,
the poor soldier was in before this her
blessed place was built" Stories ar
told of Mr.. James Lockhart, at the Sal
Market in Glasgow, who was goo
specimen of the old-fashioned moralit
Of bygone times One day countr
girl came into his shop to buy a pair q
} garters. Having asked the price, Nj
Lockhart told her they were fourpenc'
The girl said: 81 will not give you a fa
thing more than threepence for them.
? "Weel, lassie, you'll not get them," r.
9 piled the shopkeeper. Shortly afterwal
: the girl returned and said: "Pll moo G
We fourpence." "Gang ava, lassie; gar
!, . awa," replied Mr.. Lockhart, "and no te
= lies"
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