Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1880-06-10
DARK MYSTERY SOLVED.
The True Story of that Much Nal.
igned Man Anti-MasOn Morgan.
BurlingtOn HaWkeYe

Burlington Hawkeye.
Batavia, my friends" said the fat
passenger, sis the home of the late la
mented Mr.. Morgan Mr. Morgan, in
his day, was a goat-rider of consider
able celebrity. But he went back on
the goat Here is the Office of the Ad.
rocate, one of the weekly papers of Ba-
tavia. In this print shop, IN the days
of the Adrocate's ancestor, Mr.. Morgan
printed book, and told all about the
bad habits, the deceitful tricks and the
bad ways of the goat. He gave the
frolicsOme animal of the lodge away,
bad. He described his amusements;
he told how he did it and what he called
it. He just told all about it, and liter
ally took the goat by the horns, which,
Mr.. Morgan averred, were not the only
| kind of horns taken in the lodge.
''The detected animal brooded over
his wrongs He felt that Mr.. Morgan's
offense was rank 1t couldn't have
been much ranker than the goat, but
the goat didn't think of that. He only
thought of revenge He had his re-
venge One summer night the goat
got backed out of his closet, got out of
a window in the lodge room and slid
noiselessly down the lightningrod I'VE
can see the lightning-rod few blocks
further on. That very night the doom
ed and recreant Brother Morgan was
out taking a walk in the star light. The
great expOser strayed carelessly down
one street and another, his hands
clasped behind his back and his head
bent in thought As he walked with an
uneven gait his back swayed to and fro
with what an ordinary goat might con-
slider challenging gesture. He did
not look around, and SO he did not see
a terrible figure that followed him. A
gloomy, threatening, fearful shape-a
part of the night but not of it. Now
and then us it came close to Mr. Nor
gan, it would raise itself up into the air
with its head bent down, as though in
mockery of its victims attitude, and
for brief second it would retain its at
titude, looking in the gloom like a shad-
owy letter S with legs. Then it would
pause to eat circus poster, and having
finished this frugal lunch it would hast
en- on after the doomed Morgan.
"By-and-bye the traitor stood on the
bridge of the Towanda He folded his
arms, crossed his legs, and leaned easily
upon the parapet. At that instant the
goat run up to short range, unlimbered,
and went into battery, action rear He
Strengthened himself.up like lightning
rod, then he curved himself into an in
terrogation point, then he shot himself
out straight horizontally, and came
down III one time and two motions
l. l.
butted him once; but once was all the
bill called for. 1t was an immense sue
cess. The doors weren't open ten min
utes before the house was crowded,
standing room all gone and the last
man that came in had to leave his cane
outside The goats neck cracked like a
torpedo with the cOncussion and it is on
the record of the lodge that he wore q
porous plaster on his back for the next
two weeks. Nothing like it had hap
pened in his family since his great
grandfather hired himself out to August
us Caesar for a Roman catapult.
Gas for Mr.. Morgan he was amazed,
and panied and disappointed. Disap-
pointed because he could not die right
away and be done with it. He was at a
losss to know Just what had happened
and was surprised that no one else felt
the shock of the earthquake. When
he landed against the side of noun
tain, about four miles on the other side
of the creek, he began to realize the ter
rible truth. He was seized with an in
tense sickening fear of all goats, and no
wonder. The next day, when he was
standing at the mantlepiece eating his
dinner, he laid his hand on his heart
which had been knocked clear up into
the back of his neck, and took solemn
oath that he would go where he never
again could see, hear, feel, or smell a
goat-especially feel. Mr.. Morgan seems
to have been man who didn't have any
too much regard for the sanctity of an
oath, but circumstances assisted him in
keeping his vow. He started to escape
from the presence of oats the next
day.
Naturally, when he hid himself from
the nod of the headstrong and cratic
goat, he disappeared from the eyes of
men. He couldn't help it. Wherever
he found men there were goats. If he
slept in the stable the goat was there
breathing sweet perfume from his cash
mere locks He found them on the
dreary mountain side, fastening on the
dried moss of centuries. If he went to
the crowded cities, the goat, while he
chewed bits of Irvine and tomato-can
labels, looked at Mr. Morgan cornwall
ly, as who should say: Brother Nor
gan, you has my eye. If he went out
into the painless desert, the goat met
him and Hospitality invited him to have
cactus" And so he fled, speeding
with wings of fear, and bones of aching
memories to spur him on, far, far from
the haunts of men and goats. And he
never was seen again, and he never
came back. This is the true story of
Morgan's disappearance, for are we not
here in the very village where he lived?
Are we not standing on the very ground
where it all occurred? Do we not
know since we are here? 1t has been
said that Morgan's fate was an awful
one; that may not be told. 1t has
been said that the Frealand Expected
MasOns ate him up; that they run him
through a straw-cutter; that they bought
his boy Il tin horn; that they told his
wife his gun wasn't loaded, and then
buried him at a lonely spot in the dark
i forest, where two crossroads meets.
| with an ash stake driven through his
heart. Many are the wild and unreal
stories told of his disappearance,
| but"
The sad passenger paused impressive
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