The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1880-05-08
WHIRS: WISE HND WITTY.

Our clock doesn't strike. 1t is prohahiy
because its hands are at work.
The country doctor goes about DOING
good. The politician goes about talking
about doing good.
The Philadelphia Ne,cS thinks it strange
that the man who first invented sleep dld
not extend the invention to babies.
A great many people are ANXIOUS 10
Introduce new religion into the world who
have never given the old one a fair trial
And oh, Edward" said the girl lie
was leaving behind him, " at every stopping
place be sure you write and then 80 ahe'u'
Weather writer's have u good deal to
say about the mean temperature OF April
1t is, in fact, as mean rs that OF any oliier
month,
There are two kinds of oranges grown
in this country: one is the kind that is sood
to eat, and the other is the kind that l. solu
on the railway trains.
"A Boston reporter pronounces Il prayer
delivered at one OF the Hub churches re-
Gently as zone OF the most eloquent ever
addressed to Boston audience
DR.. Howard Crosby stands OH the house
top and says: snake no compromise win
the rowdyism of the rum shop" Its PLAIN
70 see that he never worked the ward for an
office.
We have generally observed that if a
man does some mighty mean thing wien De
has been drinking, the liquor had mighty
mean man to work on in the first place
Don't lay it all to drink
The greatest trouble about the toN-luh'-
ing clubs in New York, says the Detroit
Free Press. is, first, to find fox which
won't run into some grocery-st"fe' 'i''t
sscond. TO convince farmers that ride over
wheat field helps the crop.
The Western people sometimes find az
earthquakes handy thing to have around. y
family at Flarrisent, Col, whose well was
nearly dry when they went TO bed the other
night, found an abundant supply i'll 1t when
thew awoke in the morning, i'll cons equencc
of shock.
Ernest Renan lectnred in London re
Gently on "The Influence of Rome on the
Formation of Christianity" Before LEAVING
Paris he telegraphed the subject of his iec-
ture across the channel, and the London
press got it "The Influence Of Rum on the
Digestion of Humanity"
A New York paper tells of = man who
" stole $40, 900 in sixteen years Probably
the man was sick thirteen years out of The
sixteen, or he would have made the sum
larger and more respectable Forty thous-
and dollars in sixteen years is very slow
work-for New York embezzler.
A little fve-year-old friend, who was
always allowed to choose the prcttiest kitten
for his pet and his playmate before the
other nurslngs were drowned, was taken TO
his mothers sick-room the other morning to
| see two tiny, new twin babies. He looked
refiectively from one to the other for Il
minute or two, then poling his chubby
finger into the cheek of the plumpest hahy,
he said decidedly: Save this one
An Irish cergyman's daughter, aged
twelve, said to her father the other day THAI
certain consequential person wasa "haste."
Sharp parental reproof being promptly adj
ministered, missy retorted that papa had
used that very same expression himself ia
last Sundays service. Certainly not"
said the revernd papa, with much emphasis.
ooh, but you did," persisted pussy. II
! heard You say: He that exalteth hn,r
self shall be haste"