Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1880-05-31
A TRIP DOWN THE OHIO AND
MISSISSIPPI RIVERS.

Excursions to New Orleans were all
the talk. Every one who could spare
the time and the money, was bound to
make the trip, so how could I sit down
in poor old soot-ridden Cincinnati when
there came an opportunity to float away
towards the sunland. and to tell you all
about it? | couldn't; it wasn't human
nature that I should. So on Saturday,
the l4th of February, just as the sun
was slipping away to make his toilet for
another day, l bade all my dear fve-and-
forty friends fond adieu, and commit
ted myself and my baggage to the kind
care of the Charles Morgan, one of the
best steamers plying between Cincinnati
and New Orleans.
People claim that woman is always
behind time; always has to stop to take
last look at the tip of her hat-brim, or
give last turn to the idiot fringe with
which she now adorns her forehead.
And those same dear people-the all
comprehensive "they"-also assert that
the stronger half of humanity, the brave
sons who fight our battles, and 60 into
tantrums over trifes, are not only on
time but little ahead. Arguing from
this statement, l concluded that the
greater portion of the freight shipped
from Cincinnati must be sent by women,
for, after weeks notice that the steam
er would sail at five O'Clock sharp. every
shipper in the city came crowding in
with freight at the very last moment.
Men would have been ahead of time. of
course they would; SO the only logical
conclusion to arrive at is that their tar
dier sisters are running most of the
business In Porkopolistown. But
at last everything was safely on
board, the gang-plank drawn in, and our
boat headed down stream. l watched
the lights of the city until they glim-
mered like far-away stars and then were
suddenly shut out, as if a great cloud
had foated before them, and then |
made myself comfortable in the spacious
saloon, where the rest of the passengers
had already gathered for a good time.
With a good band of music, fine piano,
a genial captain and his ''gude wife, !"
there was little room for anything but
pleasure.
Sunday morning found us approaching
Louisville, the prettiest town in all Ken
lucky. Here. for the first time in my
life, l discovered the advantages Of
steamboat over railroad travelling. On
the cars I would have been whizzed
around the outskirts of the town, and
been permitted to stop only long enough
to buy horrid cup of coffee and stale
sandwich. Our steamer had twelve hun
dred plows to take on, SO, while the
roustabouts toted on the plows, l took a
look at the town, peeping in at five
churches, and hunting for friend, with
whom I spent a delightful hour.
Louisville is one of tbs prettiest south
ern towns | ever saw, with wide streets,
numerous shade trees, and many large
and handsome residences. The Conrier-
Journal building is one of the finest in
the city, and is ornamented with peace
full looking statue of Prentiss, the poet.
l wondered how he could preserve that
perpetual calm with Henry Watterson
tearing his hair and gnashing his teeth
just inside the walls; but, perhaps, look
ing back from the quiet beyond, to which
he wandered long ago, he sees that
Henry's high-sounding hullabub is only
vanity and vexation of spirit, after ALL
Did you ever wear Holman's Liver
Pad? What, never? Well, well, what
have you not missed ? If you were to
see the piles and piles of boxes in the
Office of the General Agent in Louisville,
you would think every man, woman aud
child throughout the length and breadth
of the land had been padded. And
they are really a marvellous thing. The
odor is SO closely akin to that of the in