The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1880-02-28
"1'is Well"

a citizen of Detroit, whose best weight
| never exceeds one hundred and twenty
pounds was the other day buying couple
! of hens of Il farmer in the market, and be-
fore the bargain was concluded, the two
became quite friendly, and the farmer said
he had something on his mind to c0nmuni-
cate. One Of his boys had Il passion for
thealricals and was dcslrous of becoming
an actor The idea was SO strong on him
that he had become worthless around the
farm, and the father was in peek of
trouble to know how to turn the boys Il, :
tcntiOn from the foot lights to the plOw-
handles
"Spose | send him Ito you, and 'sposc
you make fun and ridi&lle him and let him
see now foolish il isl" Ysuggeslcd the faith
CT, and the citizen agreed. AS result of
their planning the boy walked to the cii-
zcns place Of business on Congress street
east, next morning. The father had called
HIM boy, but he weighed one hundred
and sixty pounds, stood nearly six feet
high, and had II pair of hands as large
as the chrome uf the Yosemite Valley. His
arrival was expected, and after IL few words
about the Weather, the citizen qucried:
$50 you think You would make an actor,
ch2'
"Hcs, kinder think so,' was the reply.
"What line would you take2"
'Wcll, kinder like tragedy"
"rragedy! Why, you couldn't succeed
in tragedy! Look at your hands! Look
at those feet! Remember your voice.
You'd he hisscd off the stage. Don't never
think of tragedy"
the boy.
''Not at all, in the first place your cars
are too large. Then your heels stick out
too far. Then your hands would hide half
the other actors. Don't try the drama, for
YOU will be Il dead failure"
Gould do anything, in comedy?"
''Not thing. The sight of you in comedy
would be the same as the sight of hcarsc
on the stage. All the facial expression you
have is behind your cars"
'''vc thought some of being niggcr
MINSTREL observed the hoy, after long
silence.
''rhars the worst Of all. tell YOU, boy,
you'd better stick to the farm. You are
lot cut out for an actor, and YOU should
drop the idea"
"Couldn't act rs ushcr2'
''No, sir; you are too stiff in the knees"
"Couldn't take tickcts?"
"Ncvcr! Your hands are too big for
that work."
Couldn't l shift sccncs?'
mo. You are too big and unwicldy.n
There was long and painful silence.
Then the boy rose up and said:
"Wcll, Pm bound to go into thcatricals.
II can't be anything else III be the fclicr
that stands at the door to raise Il row, and
III begin on you! Come over here /"
He hauled the adviser over the table.
clutchcd him by The small of the back and
spun him Risdnd, slammed him against the
wall and dropped him to get better hold.
when the curtain rose on the next act there
was strictly private conversation going on
between Hamlet and the Ghost, and the
ghosts coat was ripped up the back and his
collar torn open. Then Hamlct suddenly
demanded IN II loud voice:
'CMtlil! do you declare that l canno,
act T"
Then the Ghost lodged around the table
and replied:
mo, don't You arc all right-you
are splendid actor--you can't help but
win!"
"And you'll tell my father SOP"
81 will--you bet ! will"
elf you don't-!"
Here Hamlet took three steps forward.
two back; scowlcd his fierccst, and the
Ghost jumped behind the stove and vowed
that he'd even pay $50 for Il private box on
the night of the dcbu.
'Tis well! y said Hamlet, and he went
over Oh the market to see if he could sell
three pccks OF onion sets for cash down.