Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1880-02-01
ZEPH pARkER'S sTRATAGEM.

Sleepy, baby-faced set o people !
Air they. Baby-faced enough, you bet
but tell you, Stree, that believe they'r
'beout born with all their eye-teeth cut
in their celestial jaws; and you've got to
get up airly, sir, if you want to take in a
Chlnee!''
The speaker was hard-iaced, hollow
jawed gentlemen, in glossy black suit,
which fitted HIM very badly, and the re-
mark was made III the smoking room of
the Continental. There he was to be
seen daily, and was supposed to have "giv
en- the speckylators fits in les IN 9th.
er words he was believed to have made a
fortune in petroleum. Al all events he
had plenty of money, and was very gen.
erous in the spending of it.
The conversation rad turned on the
vexed Chinese question, and he had
struck on the discussion.
II reck lect,' he said, ther was Zeph
Parker. He was deep I'm, was Zephl
He was long o HE and a few more mp to
Nevada, JUS 'beout the time Of the silver
craze. The boys had been washing for
gold; honest like, meow gittin' it out o.
pockets, meow outer the stream; and
when they had done with bit o. wash
dirt, and gone off to another claim, Mis-
ter Washee Washee Chinee would come
over and go over the dirt after them, and
be satisfied with what he got. All on us
goes of and loses all we'd made in gold,
gifts no silver, and comes back disappint-
ed to try after the gold again.
"Guess we might try, and try again,
but no good could we get. and ali 'beout
us was them smooth-faced, pig-tailed
Cinnamon, gittin' on prosperous and
contented.
81 tell yew,' said Zeph, 4 shall go
and murder one o. them smilin' teapots.
| can't stand 1t much ionger!'
This here was in our bit of tent,
where we were tryin' to make ourselves
happy, playin' poker on credit, and keep
In no account.
"'What for?" ! sez
"'What torn cries Zeph. Dew yew
think that ], an enlightened sitterzen of
free country, am gwine to set down
and be robbed o. INV mess o golden
pottage by a pack o. smllin, washer
wOmen-faced, opium smokln,' celestial
Jacobs? No, Stree, this dogs gwine to
bitcn
'But [ don't kinder see what this dogs
gwine to bite fur l SEE. Teapot amt
done nuthin to you.
"'Mateys, SEE Zeph, getting on the
barrel as had been his seat, things has
come to purity pass with us, heven't
they
Right, old hoss,' sez some one, ham,
merln the chest lid as had been our ia
bic.
"'Haz any man here got any tobacco?'
SEE Zeph.
"sNor
"'Haz any man here got any old Bur-
bon whisky
"'Nor
"'Haz auy man got any dust?'
"sNor
ANY flour, or pork, or boots, or new
blanketsr'
"'No, no, no, mol"
"'Then them Chinees haz,' continued
sin and a shame to let a pack of heathen-
ish cusses like them teapots as never goes
to churches nor listens 10 parsons
az say. Zeph,' SEE some one, when
did you go to meetln' LAST
Never you mind seq Zeth, land
don't interrupt q man as wants to give
you suthin' to eat 4 set O. cusses, SEE,
as never goes to meetln', and blieves in
nuthin' but ioss-houses. say, it's sin
to let 'em be gittln' fat on our land,
while we're as thin and starved-lookin'
as-aS as
g" AS ole Zeth Parker himself, SCI Tom
Paggins.
q" 'Wal, ez thin ez l am, if you like seq
zeph.
"'This is all very purity, Il seq, 'but we
can go and take Il claim from the tea
pots, Zeph; nor we can't rush EN-. and
annex the dust and nuggets they've wash
ed OUT
NO. sed Zeph, winkin' one eye; but
we kin stragetise EN-
"'How?' l seq. &" Don't kinder see it.
They're too deep to be done
"'1ah.' seq Zeph, 'they's beout ez deep
ez two-cent plate. Give me the means
and I'll sell the lot, and put good peck
etful o. dollars or dust in every mans
pocket-siX on u.s.
"'But what means d yer want2' sez
"sOne handful o dust seq Zeph.
"'And where are we to get it, SEE
Tom Paggins.
This is how seq Zeph. Morrow
mornin' every man hyar's got to go round
the camp and cadge. Tell the boys we're
hard up, but we've got a good thing on.
They'll subscribe little all reound. Yew
see if they dent
"sWell, We'll try seq we, and we
went to sleep hungry and got up raven
Gus.
There was nothing for it but to go to
work, and off we went, getting back to