davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08
HUMOROUS.

A GREAT many men who start out to
reform the world leave themselves off
for the last job.-Miidlctoon Transcript.
OLEoMARGARINE would often pass
for butter were it not for the absence
of hair. It's always ba.d-headed. and
that gives it dead away.-Watert0o o.
SerCer.
THERE is said TO be a newspaper pub
lished in Alaska which hasn't yet pub
lished a Presidential estimate, but the
rumor stands sadly in need of confirma-
tion.-ADany Journal.
Miss II. (who has chosen medicine as
a profession) to Professor. who has Civ
en- the class an ox's heart to dissect:
"Oh! Professor, can't we have forks to
handle it with?'-TaSsar Miscellany.
VANDERBILT is worth over fifty mill
ions. He can go to the first church
strawberry festival of the season, treat
half a dozen young ladies and have
enough money left for next mornings
neutrality-suspicious. Herald.
IT'S quite time that ministers stopped
asking, "Does death end alp" So far
as We know 1t does. 1t at least puts an
end to the fellow who tries to borrow
money. And we're thankful for even
SO small a favOr.-N. y. Express.
The new foundation of the Washing
ton Monument will be laid in a few
weeks, and the erection of the monu-
ment will be begun in 1899. 1t is con-
fidently expected that the work will be
completed by 3080.-M. Y. Com. i'd
vertiSer.
A BRIGHT son of a dyer in a Birming-
ham wooden factory went to New York
a few years ago in the employ of l.
&T-. By attention to business he
advanced from post TO post, and o
has the whole charge of the business
and Is a millionaire. What became of
Ia II is not stated. However,
that has nothing to dowith the moral
Danbnry EewS.
SUMNER time will come amin,
With its softly-blowing zephyrs;
Lowing kline are in the fields:
Some are cows and some are heifers.
-TcnnysOn, uhcn rcfp young.
LuACs soon will shed their fragrance;
Snow balls. too, as round as bullets;
Cackling fowls are in the barnyard:
Some are hens and some are pullets.
-Idccob Struuss.
"GEM'LEN," said Brother Gordon, as
he got his legs under him. "a pusson
who labors under de ideah dat he am
foolin' de world will sooner or later git
the grand laff. A pusson can deceive
de public for few days. or q few weeks,
but as o IS de fraud am exposed he
am a gone coon. You may stand yer
hats Ober on yer ears, hang
put yer brass watch-chains, an
puff away at yer cheap cigars. but
de majority of men will see right frew
You like a buzz-saw chopin up cheese.
What we am we am. an let us bar in
mind de solemn fack dat while skim
milk has its value an its uses, it won't
make ice-cream nor deceive de babies"
Free Press Limeklln Club.
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08
characteristics Of New Zealand.

HAVE been quite interested recent
ly in New Zealand, in a geological
sense, and have been quite surprised TO
find out what an attractive place
in some respects it is. 1t is
about the size of England, and has
little pieces of all parts of the world
huddled together within its boundaries.
1t has mountains wrapped in snow and
infested with glaciers like the Alps
Zone peak, Mount Cook, rises over 49,
600 feet above the level of the seal; it
has a temperate zone of charming
plains, valleys and table lands; it has
the barren and rocky hills of Maine;
it has the dismal swamp of Florida; it
has tropical forests. including the lux
uriant and graceful fern tree and cab
bage palm, large inland lakes and noble
rivers; it has volcanic mountains vom-
iting fire and lava, geysers like those
of Iceland, hot springs and warm lakes.
and it has. besides, features peculiar to
itself-wild and deep gorges make an
impossible division between some dis
tricts-immense rolling plains covered
with waving ferns; OH one side Aus
tralia, the largest island in the world
(about the size of the United States);
on the other the lovely islands of the
South Sea, the most beautiful region on
the globe, coral bound and ocean born,
wildly colored, affording substance
without labor, with a delicious, dreamy
languor in the air and a low monotone
of surf, limiting vague remembrances of
the throbbing vibrating ocean heart
from which they sprang.
Coal is found in New Zealand IN
abundance, also limestone, silver, cop
per. tin and iron. gold-bearing quartz
reefs, gold fields and golden sand
which has been carried down by the
rivers to the sea, and with every tide
thrown back upon the shore, so rich is
the deposit. making literal the ex-
preston, golden sands of the sea-
Shore" Heaps of gold are sometimes
found lying among the rocks or loose
~ covered with earth (gold was dis
covered. in 1852, and since that time
EGG. 000. 600 have been exported up to
1870. Snakes do not exist. Over
100 years ago Captain Cook visited the
island. He found no animals except q
rat and a green lizard. He left a num-
Der which multiplied rapidly. Birds
existed and still exist in great mum.
bers.-Mrs. S. Il. Ballard, in the N. y.
Gr1Dhic.
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

AT Scarlettstown, Pa. q young man
tried to prevent his father from chas-
Using alittle girl. when father and son
clinched in a hard tussle for muscular
supremacy. The pugilists rolled into a
millrace and fought in the water for
some minutes. Having ended the
struggle at last, the father packed up q
few duds and left for the West. The
son also packed his trunk and left for
parts unknown.
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08
Coming Dispatches.

CHINA and Russia are going to wal.
Puck says we may now expect to have
dispatches something after this style:
CHINA ALLEE Me mee.ee heapee
Lussian Hoops; me knockee 'em all into
q clockee hattee.
'CHING CHoLAR Bossee Geneial.'
The corresponding Russian dispatch
would be as follows:
''CHINAwICH WALLowITCH.-The
Celestialowich troopsokof were lassoski
hightOvich knockedimoff higheroski
than a kiteoyitch.
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES TR~AINoILOvIrCH,
"Major-General Inc Second Deputy Car"
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

HITHERTO when a professional diver
under water a tube has supplied
him with air. But q Mr.. Fleuss has
patented . process by which an expert
enced diver can remain under water for
hours, having within his helmet and
dress . supply Of compressed oxygen
gas. diluted with nitrogen. which is
naturally present in his lungs and in
the diving dress when he assumes it.
The exhaled carbonic acid being
brought into contact with caustic soda,
the deadly gas is transformed into sim
pie carbonate of soda 1t is asserted
that numerous experiments and tests
have conclusively proved that Mr..
Fleuss's system is attended with no in
and the expense is one
half that Of the old method Mr..
Fleuss is only twenty-eight His pro-
cess has been brought out since the
lay Bridge disaster.
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08
ALI. sOET~

WnEs John Thompson. - Middle
bury. VT, returned ~ his hlfhy bowel
after n prolonged spree. bis eight dogs.
Amos, starved. attacked him II be-
cam" necessary to xiii al the dogs be-.
fore be- could u" rr.rasi. ard thrn ha
Was torn from heal Ia feet
PErEK McCAHr1. thnngh permanent
~ crippled la hath hand, bs = railroad
accident in Texas. has never given up
the battle al life. and instead "a reflnlng
ani depending on charity. i'visr nov
drives the mail in Arizona Territory
over a siSiy-hyc mile route.
Now TuE puzzle IL fifteen j. irving
the patience aud ingenuity &c the Rus
slams. The ~. Petersburg mandatory
81 educational objects has turned uut
the puzzle in large quantities. with iha
notion that u may serve 90 develop tho
virtue IT patience ia children.
A A who had been exposed to
smallpox in Boston. anil refused o. be-
vsccins'ed when ORDERED by the B,sarI
81 Health. wa. sentenced - pay n tine
81 five dollar. and cost ths fafl es-
tent IL the Law. After thinking the
matter over. be concluded 20 comply
with the Las. aud the fine Wa r.miitri.
Drsn CoJGAS. bridge tender at
bridgeport. for the Nsw YORK. Nrw
Haven & Hartford Road. has held tha
place for thirty years. has never .pst a
day. and has watched the bridge \, an
times. never slesping over an hour and
a half NJ a time. lie il the owner II
four Cub houses and other property.
accumulated during \ long and indus
trious career.
FREEMAN. the Adyeniis; who Killed
has child about q yea ago. has been re-
committed to the Dsuvers (Niv...) In.
sane Asylum. During his confinement
There be has gained ten pounds. aud =
IN excellent health. lie IL generally
cheerful and hopeful. but Is disincline.l
To talk ON matters personAl % himself.
lie msiniains that he IL not insane. ile
makes himself usefsl In d1Hsesfir work
about the ward. III. department {.
perfect. ard bis influence up,n toe
other patients with whom he /. brought
IN contact IL good
JoBs WILLIAMS. n merchant, a, Rat
ledge. Ga. sued = desperate. The isL
low entered the store in = fariou. pas.
son. held ou the IN one hassd.
ciuiehed a long knife in The other. ami
.ald: Williams have Won sued me
Williams knew that an iasnesiafs
Yes. would make him sure 81 = stab.
Let me ge' my s~pee;seIes. AZ thai I
can read the paper he said lie wen.
Iehfnd The counter and cane back. a1t
with bis glasses bg; with an an across
MS shoulder. "Ye- ks sail. - hag.
sued you" IAN right" remarked ,hs
Desperate. Il yuess III par the BILL
The employment n foreigner. IN the
japanese service ~ an annually De-
ereasinz number. The JspsnS.e Coy
eminent is having i:s subjects taayh, in
Europe IN order tia; they naay b~e.s,ns
competent IN DO the work Ehlch 20
ropssns are now paid for p~~rforninz.
one oy one foreign snpio, "a are bei1y
superseded b. natives in vzrso<.. De-
parfmehts and public works The Jsn-
ansse are = seifhsIpfal people. and xsIl
o keep foreigners o DO What they
can accomplish Themselves. J.pa1.
therefoEe. viii sapu cease "a be = f~a
for he snsrgies Of edrcztssi sozsixsers
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

Our ancestors. the monkeys. could'ni
have been 50 ignorant after all. They
were ~ eduassea y Tie higasI
ofAnoAee
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

An editor who thinks that he knows
all about farming says in speaking
about strawberries that the best way to
raise them is with spoon.
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

Last Skinner \ lad NJ Garte-soo.
" n. found q young robin ~ifh a
broken wing. snf cared for il u-fI the
Wing uAs restored 80 tbz. ;he bird
eouia ny; then ~ = Dreesufssn against
PROVING eats. he took the bril- 20 Al
orchard half \ mile azav. where is 81;
u HIS spr1nx his fztbeE . family s~re
ssrprssd 10 see the same rubin esrex
ne klfehen and make Ffseif n hon~.
hopping about and pryiEy into every
corner After afsw DAYS the bnf uaas
80 nest on a projection firm Tie 81
o. . q fss Window A perssz - ..e
oAs oos INTO he Hsss, aaa l.s Anl
ahexs - ssga q tsss
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

A CONTEMPORARY prints . roem
called Gather Ripe Fruits. ODeah-'
And that would be best II is so now
thst the small boy gathers the fruits
before they are ripe. and Ga Death
aA.hess the small boy
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

THx world may owe you . lllving. hWa
you must eelleet Stnf vS6 hiAs,
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

The new compromise metals. Cd
which so much was heard . few months
ago, are TO have . trial n the Mint.
The Director of the Mint Is 20 have
coined four hundred specimens each Of
and the .-goloid' dollar. These are
specimens Of . reforni coinage recon-
mended by Alexander H1sephens and
Invented By Or. HubsA Of Ph!.ade.-
The Red Cloud chief., 1880-07-08

A "sPRING-srrLE'' circular with a
number of new forms Of the duplex
tickets which are no. very widely
used, has been issued. Besides ordinary
tickets TO be given by conductors. these
specimens include half-fare tickets.
special excursion tickets. receipts TO
commuters who have lef: their tickets
at home, stop-oyer checks and others
of the many forms required in the daily
business Of railroad. In AL these are
preserved the special principle Of the
duplex ticket. the W halves. q ~
be given TO the passenger and returned
to the company, the other to be re-
tanned by the conductor. the two form
ing mutual checks and vouchers
Among the new applications OF the
principles are q baggage and freight
check for the Pittsburgh Southern
showing nature of articles, amount
paid. etc. and the shippers half form
ing q check Dr. receipt to be delivered
OF receip; Of the goods 1t destination.
Another is q grain warehouse check for
the Lake Shore Road. which must be
extremely convenient where . large
business Is done. On II the warehouse
man can punch Of In aminute the date,
kind and amount Of grain received, 20
be entered afterward At his leisure on
the books. while the shipper exchanges
his halt-check for q receipt, and IL
forms Q voucher for the warehouse
books. These duplex tickets, in some
of their forms. are now ia use on rozds
all over the United States and Canada
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10
GRASS VALLEY MARBLE WORKS.

prepared to furnish Graye-stones, Monuments,
MantIes Marble Tile, etc. short notice. cheaper than
can be furnished by any other parties. Designs be
seen my residence south side Of King street. blocks
sast OF the Capitol, EDWARD HARPER
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10
INVESTIGATION IN MAINE.

Governor Davis of Maine, in his message
talks in very sensible way regarding the re-
cent political troubles. He says, "There can
be no half way ground in regard to this great
public wrong, which should receive the con,
domination of every honest citizen. That 1t
may serve as warning in the future to those
who, under free government, may attempt
to trample upon the rights of the people l
would recommend an Investigation of the
whole subject of arranging, tabulating and
counting the returns, and that the facts ascer-
tanned be made public" There is an investi-
CATION needed in Maine, fair and impartial
investigation where no fact should be sup
pressed. Let the truth and nothing less than
the whole truth come out and let the facts fall
where they will. A cleaning up of the whole
affair is needed, and the investigation should
be so coBplete as not to leave peg for dis
satisfaction to hang upon.
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10

GEN. HOOPS BooK.-Ths APPEAL haa just
recsived the advance sheets of posthumous
work by General Hood of the Confederate
army, entitled Advance and Retreat" and
is history of the war. The book is published
by General G. T. Beauregard, for the Hood
Orphan Memorial Fund. The book is an ee
giant octave, containing $50 pages, with fine
photograph likeness and line steel engraving
made expressly for this work, fourlarge maps
of battle fields, bound in handsome gray En-
glish cloth, at So 90; or in fine sheep bind
ing, with marble edges, So so; la halt bound
morocco, library style, "a 90; or ia best le-
want turkey morocco, full gilt sides, So 90.
The proceeds of the sale of this work will be
devoted to the maintenance of Hoods Or
phaned children. The book itself is intrin-
sicaly worth the price and the soldiers Of the
late war, no matter under which flag they
fought, can mingle their money in common
fund, in charity for the little ones left behind
by as brave a soldier as ever died in the front
of battle 1t is better than reunions of men
who fought in warning lines and better than
all of the tender ceremonies of Decoration day,
because the result is lasting and practical
one
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10

HELP POR IRELAND-It seems a little
strange that the money being subscribed to
the relief of the Irish sufferers comes most ex-
tensively from Americans. We have as vet
heard of no wealthy Irishman coming to the
front with anything like subscription accord
ing to his means. James Gordon Bennett has
given 100000 How much has James Flood
givenl Where is Dennis Kearney, and how
much of his collections does he send to Ire
land2 The ornamentatlens of the church in
Italy in the shape of plate ana jewels are
worth millions, and the money which helped
to buy them came from the very people who
to-day are shivering and starving. If the jew
els which lie useless in the dim cathedraIs of
Rome could be turned into bread. how much
more of real use they would be in the world
If the Irish want America to assist them in so
trying an hour as the present, let more of the
wealthy Irish citizens of America come for
ward with contributions proportionate to their
vast wealth. So far, the contributions from
Irish sources have come from people not over
blessed themselves with the worlds goods
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10

In Antelope Valley last week, the drama OF
the g Ten Virgins was produced for the ben
eft of the Church. During the last act the
plate was passed round among the audience
and a riot resulted. The citizens thought it
was bad enough to pay dollar at the door
to see such play, without being freshly in
suited by having a contribution plate thrust
in their faces. By emitting the final tableau
quiet was restored. Whether the ten virgins
were bona fda residents of the Valley, or i'm
ported from Virginia City, is net stated.
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10
THE Gar OF Russia, finding that the news

THE Gar OF Russia, finding that the news
papers are making it hot for him, has deter
mined on starting one of his own. The Gar
doubtless imagines that he will have delight.
full time running newspaper and abnsng his
enemies To a man leading monotonous,
humdram life like the Gar, the excitement
of running daily journal will be refreshing
novelty. Subjects who refuge to advertise
will be beheaded on the spot, and delinquent
subscribers hustled off to Siberia
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10
THE REDUCTION IN RAILROAD
FREIGHTS.

Mr.. Mills newspaper organ this morning,
in enumsrating the manifold blessings which
1t says the Virginia & Truckee railroad has
conferred upon this community, says:
" Last Spring the railroad company re-
duced its rates from Is to % per cent. Ex-
cept upon two articles-coal and wood-we
do not believe any deduction has been made
by merchants to consumers because of the re-
duction on freight. This shows exactly the
real state of things. If tomorrow the rates
we're reduced to a figure which would only
pay running expenses, there would not be a
deduction made by the merchants on half a
dozen articles that people consume"
This is rather serious charge to make
against the merchants of Virgini,, and in OF.
der to get some figures upon the subject, the
Chronicle this morning applied to leading
business house, with the following result:
During the year from February l, 1879, to
February l, 1880, this business house shipped
over the Vlrgini Il Truckee railroad 1000,
600 pounds of freight. Since the adjourn
ment of the Legislature the house has just sa
we'd $3.50 upon its outlay for freight by reason
of the reduced tariff of which Mr. Mills or
gan boasts The average saving has been
nine and one half cents per ton.
IL may De Judged from this how much
cheaper merchants Can afford to sell goods
under the reduced" freight schedule than
under the old.
The heaviest reduction made by the Virginia
Il Truckee railroad since the adjournment of
the Legislature has been on the passenger fare
between this city and Gold Hill. This was
brought down from 25 to 10 cents. The object
of this grand tumble in the price of trip
to Gold Hill was to run off the stage line,
which charges two bits, and which affords en-
ployment and living to perhaps eight or ten
white men-a state of things which naturally
exasperstes Millionaire Mills and moves him
to enter into an opposition with the hope of
crushing the little stage line. - Virginia
ChJ0aicle
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10

Three burglars entered bank in Knoxville
Ill, on the 9TH, and seized and bound the
President, Z. c. Runkle, who sleeps in the
building, ani after gagging and beating him,
and burning his feet in shocking manner TO
compel him to give mp the combination, de-
parted, taking $500 which had not been
locked up. A time lock beng on the safe
Rankle was uAable to give the combination,
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10

When the young man of the period. the gay
matinee masher, desires to express hi. sense
of admiration, he family CALCULATES; g Say,
look at her! Isn't she daisy! She breaks me
all up, paralyses me and makes me tired. .
The durndest cled hopper will concede that
this is infinitely more elegant than the old
style: g Gosh amt she some punkens' knocks
me sitter than corpse, by gol-busts the
wind clear out o'mer' 1t does not require the
evidence Of statistics to assert the rapid men
tai improvement of our youth,-New Orleans
Times.
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10

SHALL 1T BE SERF LABoRl-As the building
Of the extension of the V. d I. railroad nears
a commencement the people are becoming
every day more interested in the question as
to what sort of labor the Superintendent, Mr.
Yerington, proposes to employ. Within a
day or two past it has TRANSFERRED that, because
of the cheapaess of Monaghan wages, he will
import a large number of coolies for that pur
pose. In view of the fact thai bnndreds of
workingmen are out of employment and ac-
tually suffering for the bare necessaries of life
il. Virginia City, it is not a matter of surprise
that the Unions, which claim to champion
and protect the rights of all working people,
should look with disfavor upon such propo-
sition. A thoughtful community, with the
cause of humanity at heart, will be grateful
if they make it very plain to the managers of
that road that so long as there is surplus OF
white labor in the country no other shall be
employed. 1t is not necessary to bring new
mex to Nevada for this enterprise. More
than could be utilized are already here; toe
poor to start out for new scenes; too proud
to beg and too conscientious to steal, these
men live on. hungry, cold and wretched,
clingiag to the forlorn hope that the Spring
will bring for them some warmth and cheer,
by furnishing them a chance to honestly earn
a place to live in comfort. Shall they be left
TO 90 still further down into the valley of des-
pair, growing bitter and hard and desperate
over their untold woes, that rich corpora
ton may save in it's Golfers, already overflow
ing the money which would make so many
homes happy Shall this ''blessing" Tin dis
guise) be encouraged to give the hire they are
obliged to expsnd, in order to facilitate the
increase of their princely incomes, to horde
Of filthy, ignorant Cinnamon, who will ship |
the larger part of the pittance doled out to |
them to China, while honorable, worthy white
men--our countrymen-are left to starve, or
rob, or tramp, or diet Let those who have the
power, because they hold the fear-inspiring
lash make answer.
Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1880-02-10
MISCELLANEOUS.

There are no less than eight MANN 9TH cop
per lodges within very short distance OF
Prescott, Arizona.
A drunken Indian at Tybo recently tried
to carry off Chinawoman, but her screams
brought assistance, and poor Lo had to depart
alone and disconsoIate.
A seventeen, year old boy of Rochester,
Ohio recently fired ball through his sister
heart with pistol, which lie didn't know was
loaded His name is Campbell.
The bill for the relief of former occupants
of Point San Jose reservation, near San Fran
cisco, has been placed in the hands of sub
committee, who will act upon 1t shortly.
A New York telegram says that David Stan
ton of England won the byccie race for
purse and the championship of America. He
made fifty miles in three hours az. five min
utes.
The Presbyterian Union of Cleveland has
voted that no Christian Can consistently read
Sunday newspapers, but has expressed no
opinion on Monday morning papers, which
are made On Sunday.
Two miles of railroad have been built on
the,ice, crossing the St. Lawrence river at
Montreal The ties and stringers are laid
fiat and water pumped between them TO freeze,
thus making a solid bed.
An Oakland dispatch states that a shooting
afray took place there Saturday, between
p. McFadden and Jacob Leutz an Alameda
policeman Several shots were exchanged,
and one bullet passed out through the open
doorway. and struck Mrs. Stetson. who was
passing at the time, killing her instantly.