Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1880-08-13


Twain's fertile pen. What the author
SAYS in the Introductory note-relative to
the story being taken from droll book
he has written-is actually true:
TAsI haven't miscellaneous article at hand, nor
subject 10 make one Of nor time to write the ar
tiele II i had a subject, begto offer the following
take whn pS Ihe Nave Seen srar
ed upon at intervals during the past three Years,
and which hope TO finish yet before all The boys
grow up will explain, for the readers beneht. As
follows: The lad who s talking Is slim. gentle,
smileless creature void of all sense OF humor, anu
speakinr to little Edward VI, King of England, in
| a room in the palace; the Two are by themselves
the speaker was .whippng-6oy to the KING when
the latter was Prince of Wales James l. and
charles H. had whipping-boys when they were little
fellows to take their punishment for them when
they fell short IN their lessons so harT r @ xn
purpose. The time OF this scene Is cary III me
year l54s, consequently Edward VI Is about l"
years of age the other lad Is II or l1-I
Twill tell it, my liege, seing thou hast
SO commanded (said the whipping boy,
with a sigh which was manifestly we'll
freighted with painful recollections. }
though it will open the sore afresh, and
l shall suffer again the miseries OF that
misbegotten day.
1t was the last midsummer-Sunday
afternoon-and drowsy. hot and breath
less all the green country side
gaspcd and painted with the heat. was
at home, alone; alone, and burdened with
the solitude. But first it is best that l
say somewhat of the old knight, my faith
er-Sir Humphrey. He was Just turn
ed 40 in the time of the Field OF the Cloth
of Gold, and was brave and gallant sub
iect. He was rich, too, albeit he grew
poor enough before he died. At the
~. Iap 1rno I'l 70
and shone with the best In famous
masque, there, he clothed himself IN a
marvellous dress of most outlandish sort,
imaginary raiment OF some tabled prince
of goblins, or spirits, or l know not what;
but this | know, that it was nine-days
wonder, even there, where the art OF the
broad world had been taxed in the inven-
ton of things gorgeous, strange and
memorable. Even the king, thy father,
said it was triumph, and swore it with
his great oath, "By the Splendor Of
Godr' What king hath praised is
precious, though it were dirt before; SO
my father brought home the dress to
England, and kept it always laid up In
herbs to guard it from injurious insects
and decay. When his wealth vanished,
he clung to it still.
Age crept upon him, trouble wrought
strangenesses in him, delusions ate into
his mind He was of SO uncomfortable
piety, and so hot-spirited withal, that
when he prayed, one wished that he
might give over, he SO filled the heart
with gloom of hell and the nose with the
stink of brimstone yet when he was done,
his weather straightway changed, and he
so ragged and swore and laid about him,
right and left, that ones thought was,
Would God he would pray again."
| In time he was affected with fancy
that he could cast ont devils-woc worth
the day. This very Sunday, whereof l
have spoken to your grace, he was gone
with the household, on this sort of godly
mission, TO Hengist's wood, mile and
more away, where all the gaping fools in
Billion parish were gathered to hear him
pray most notorious and pestilent devil
out of the carcass of Gammer Hooker,
an evil-minded beldame that had been
long and grievously oppressed with the
devils presence, and in truth legion
more. God pardon me if l wrong the
poor old ash-cat in 80 charging her.
| AS did advertise your grace IN the
beginning, the afternoon was come and l
was sore wearied with the loneliness.
Being scarce ont of my thirteenth year,
| was ill-stocked with love for solitude,
or patience to endure it. l cast about
me for pastime, and in an evil hour my
thought fell upon that gala suit my faith
er had brought from the Field Of the
Cloth of Gold near thirty years bygone.
1t was sacred one might not touch it
and live an nv father found him in the
act. But l said within myself. tbs
stubborn devil that bides in Gammer
Hooker; my father cannot hurry him
forth with one prayer, nor yet hundred
there is time enow-I will have look
though perish for the trespass.
dragged the marvel from its hiding.
and fed my soul with the sight. Oh,
theu shouldst have seen it flame and
flash in the sun, my liege! 1t had all
colors and none were dull The hose of
shining green-lovely silken things-the
high buskins, red heeled, and great gol-
den spurs, jeweled and armed with rowels
a whole span long, and the strangest
trunks, the strangest odd-fashioned doub-
let man ever saw, and SO manycolored,
so rich of fabric and SO bespangled :: and
then the robe 1t was crimson satin,
banded and barred from top to hem
with webbed glory of precious gems, if
haply they were not false-and mark
ye, my lord, this robe was all of a piece
and covered the head, with holes to
breathe and spy through and it had
long, wide sleeves of n most curious pat
tern then there was a belt and a great
sword, and shining golden helmet full
three spans high, out Of whose top sprung
a mighty spray of plumes, dyed red US
fire. A most gallant and barbaric dress
evil befall the day saw it.
When l was sated with gazing at it,
and would have hid it i'll its place again,
the devil of misfortune prompted me to
put it on. 1t was there that my sorrow
and my shame began. | clothed my
self in it, and girt on the sword, and fix
ed Oh the great spurs. Naught titted-all
WAS a world to large-yet WAS | content
and filled with windy vanity. The he'll
met sunk down and promised to smother
me. like n cat with its head fast in Il
flagon, but stuffed it out with rags, and
so mended the defect The robe dragged
the ground, wherefore was | forced to
hold it up when / desired to walk with
freedom. Marching hither and yonder
before the mirror, the grand plumes
gladened my heart and the crimson splen-
dors of the rolps made my foolish soul TO
sing fcrjoy, albeit, to speak plain truth,
my first glimpse of mine array did well
nigh fright the breath out of my lank
body, so like moving conhagration did
seem.
Now, forsooth, could not be content
with private and secluded happiness, but
must go forth from the house and see the
full sun flash upon my majesty. look
ed warily abroad on every side no hu-
man creature was i'll sight passed
down the stairs and stepped upon the
green sward.
behelda a something then that in one
little ileeting instant whisked all thought
of the finery ont of my head, and brim-
med it with a hot new interest 1t was
our bull-a brisk young creature that !
had tried to mount Il hundred times and
failed now he was grazing, all peacefully
and quiet, with his back to me. / crept
toward him, stealthily and slow, and oil,
so eager and anxious, scarce breathing
lest / should betray myself; then with
one master bound lit astride his back !!
All, dear my liege, it was but woeful
triumph He ran, he beloved, he
plunged here and thereand yonder, and
flung his heels aloft i'll so mad II fashion
that l was sore put to it to stick where
was, and fain to forget it WIS a
jaunt of pleasure, and busy my
mind with expedients to the saving
Of my neck. Wherefore, to this end | did
take 80 deadly grip upon his sides
with those CALLING spurs that the pain of
it banished the slim remnant of his reason
TINT was left, and 80 forsook he all semb-
lance of reserve, and set himself the task
Of tearing the general world to rags. if SO