New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1880-10-20

I'LL tell We what this ere CrOWbaf
City needs an must hev," said Slathers
johnson, as he mounted a barrel and
looked around ON the miners. eve
want City Governments Common
Councils body to make ordinances an
enforce 'em-a-a-"
The rest of his speech was drowned
by the cheers of the crowd. 1t was in
SO, and Crowbar City was collection
of shanties and huts on Bob-Tail Creek,
in Nevada. We were doing we'll
enough, and the camp was very peace
full and quiet. Slathers johnson was
the LATEST miner in the camp, but was
looked up to as great politician. Back
in the States he had been Constable,
Overseer Of Highways, Tax Collector,
School Inspector, and so on, but yet
his hankering was not satisfied.
It was finally decided that Crowbar
City be divided into eight wards, and
that each ward be entitled to one Al
derman. while a Mayor, Treasurer and
Clerk should be elected at large. There
were about four huts or tents to .
ward, with q constituency of from five
to eight persons for each Alderman.
"How shall we purceed to elect?"
blandly inquired Slathcrs, as he re-
mounted the barrel.
There was dead silence for minute,
and then Raccoon Bill, of the bloody
Sixth Ward, threw his old hat on tho
ground, pulled his shooter and kindly
inquired;
CAR thar any buzzard here from
my ward who don't think I'd make a
howlin' old Alderman? If thar ar,
let him edge up this way fur about ten
seconds!'
No one edged, and Raccoon Bill was
declared the unanimous choice of the
electors of his ward. Several others
elected themselves in the same off-hand
manner, and there was no trouble until
Blue Clay Smith said he thought he
could represent the Eighth Ward about
rs well rs any other resident vulturc.
If not, why not? Three resident vul-
lures At once stepped forward to contest
his election, and there was a four
handed fight which lasted ten minutes
and decided the election in favor of
Cross-Eyed Turner, of Ohio. Slathcrs
was then elected Mayor by reclamation,
rs were also the other general officers,
and the largest hut in town was cleaned
ont for Il meeting of the Common
Council.
The eight Aldermen sat on the ground
in circle, and the Mayor sat in tho
center on a bag of meal, and opened tho
session by saying:
'Has any Alderman any motion to
make?''
81 'spose q mosliun that this zero
honorable body purvidc itself with q
bari of whisky at the expense of tho
city would be in ordcr,' remarked tho
Alderman from the Third"
'Not by a burned sight" bawled one
Of the crowd at the door.
"Or,ler! order! or I'll bust dozen
heads out there!' shouted the Mayor.
g See here, Old boss, hain't you put
tin on a heap of style fur the fust
meetin'p' asked the Alderman from the
Sixth, as he leaned forward,
"There's moshun pendin'r' answer
ell the Alderman from the Third.
(which ere moshun is as follers!''
remarked the Alderman from the First,
as he hit the chap from the Sixth on
the ear.
There was little performance of
"cight hands round and the Mayor in
the middle" and it was fifteen minutes
before order was restored. Then tho
Alderman from the Fourth showed his
bitten finger into his pocket and said:
"My constituents, who ar among the
heaviest taxpayers in the city, believe
that the price Of washin' is too blamed
high, an they demand"
''When did you ever have an washin'
done" Interrupted the Alderman from
the Seventh.
"Cit The drop on him Rillr' yelled
man at the door.
"Order! The Mayor commands
order!' shouted Slathers.
Three shots were fired, four or five
Aldermen knocked down, and when tho
cyclone passed everybody had his shoot
er on his knee.
When interrupted, we war about
to take up the order Of unfinished busi-
ness" remarked the Mayor, as no
nursed his bitten ear.
Il move that we adiournr'
"Adjourn be blowedr'
"Qucstionr'
"Ayes and noesr'
OfIcf!
"Some onery coon out thar has
kicked my doSr' said the Mayor, as the
yelps OF canine rose above all other
sounds.
"Sot down, you old he-wolf!' yelled
some one, and at that the light was up
set and the circus began. We locked
the door on the crowd and got under
cover of the rocks, but that house
couldn't hold 'em. In five minutes
they were fighting all over town, and
every ward had a rally and knock
down. 1t was four weeks before all the
bullets were dug out and the broken
heads healed up. Slathers lost an ear
and two fingers, and his farewell mes
sage was brief. He wrote:
aldermen: Fame is mockery. of.
fee is degradin', and resign in favor
OF any coyote you kin agree on. RO-
mans, farewell. I came, ] saw, and got