The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1880-04-15
A STORM IN THE sANcTUM.
How the Editorial Staff of the Lit
erary Bouquet Was Demoralized
By a Floral Offering.


: BILE for the following merry extrava
ganza, perpetrated at the expense OF
our charming confreres of the Mar
tin College Literary Bouquet, who
! will doubtless heartily share the
mirth which 1t is calculated to pro
E woke. We trust we do violence to
, none of the proprieties of journal
ism when we give vent to the sus
picion that the article emanated
from the facile Faber of Mr.. Jas. O..
: Cook, handsome young Bohemian,
attached to the editorial staff of the
, Banner, who is as full of bright and
saucy humor as an egg is of meat.
1t may be consoling to the young
ladies TO know that he is unmarried,
and we violate no confidence when
we say that he contem plates an
early visit to Pulaski. If he should
ven ture here now he will do so at
his peril, for our fair confreres
will know how to wreak vengeance
on his infiammable heart ED.
CITIZEN.
JOURNALISTIC JEALOUSY.
We received last week the first
number of "The Literary Bouquet"
published monthly by the Litero-
Musical Society of Martin College. /
Pulaski. The motto is "Non
SibI. Sed Omnibus" The editor
does not explain why "Non Sibi'
said "OmnIbus," but we suppose
the electric words we're uttered un-
der similar circumstances t. those !
in which King Richard III found
himself when he astonisned his |
army by shouting at the top of his |
voice, ga horse! a horsei my king |
dom for horser' Did the reader
ever stop to think what neat com
pliment Richard paid the horse, the |
noblest of all animals, in those |
land need Oh horse, that he was
willing to exchange his kingdom
(gotten through fraud, a Ia the Pres
idency) for one. We have always |
thought that Richard did not mean
what he said when he proposed to
exchange his kingdom Tor a horse,
and we are satisfied thai those who
heard the proposal did not, or some
ambitious young soldier would have
struck trade with the despotic
ruler
But we wander. Everything
around the Bouquet Oh. g IS not as
lovely as it was. Notwithstanding
the harmony that existed prior to
the first issue of the paper, the seeds
of discord have been sown, and a
split in the editorial management of
the Bouquet is apparent. In short,
a new editor is needed at the Bou-
quet Office, and ifsany-one knows of
4 beautiful, accomplished, amiable,
and talented young lady who de-
sires the position with it's emolu-
ments of fame, glory and riches,
please send her up to Pulaski imme-
diately.
The troubles vaguely alluded to
above happened in this way: The
second day after the fret appear
ance of the paper on the streets of
Pulaski, a young mana regular
chewing gum young man-sent
beautiful bouquet of flowers to the
office, addressed to the editor, with
out designating which editor was
to receive it. When the boy who
was employed to deliver the floral
collection entered the sanctum, the :.
chief arose, with a majestic air, a d,
smile of triumph lighting up her in
tellectual features, and stretched
out her fair hand for the cluster of
~ hlaooA,no Tho f.ffx cd ri
arose for the same purpose, a look
Of utterable scorn sweeping r
athwart her sunny brow, as though
she thought her chief a little too Z
previous. The managing editor
dropped her pencil, swept forward, I
and, with one majestic sweep of her
hand, cried. Stop" 1t was fear 7
full moment, and the expression of
each face was awfully sublime. /
at is minep' cried the chief. d
at is notr' cried the local, sit is
miner and she ground her pretty s
foot into the floor.
81 am sorry TO disappoint YOU" e
said the manager, as she waved a
hem back in truly dramatic style, /
l scorninl curl settling on her up a
per lip, "but it is mine; l know the
handwriting.
"Who sent it?" cried the chief to
the now trembling boy. Eyes, who
sent itP said the local, bending her
ear for the answer. "Divulge the
name of the sender at your peril?'
exclaimed the manager excltedly,
md she shook her tapered fingers
lnder the unchin's nose. This so
the boy that he dropped
he bouquet and turned to flee. The ';
,nief stopped to take up the bunch II
Of fragrance. The local bent for tt
he same laudable purpose. Unior oil
for all tnree, the manager RI
lnelt at the same moment, and the p
Effect of it all was that three journ r
Ilistic heads came together with aC
force. The chief went te
o the wall, the local spun around in
ike a top and brought up against u
he desk, the manager sat down on p
he floor, and in these positions G
hey glared at each other. Then 81
ach moved forward and three sa
lands. were stretched out for the
The momen5 was one of
wful sublimity. The avaricious
myers of the chief were in three in
inches of the prize; the blue veined A
Iand of the local was hanging like he
canopy just above it, when the -,
manager, by an athletic jump, lifted ~
Ierself in the air and in the nick of lin
ime succeeded in landing lump NJ
IN the bouquet. The chief looked IN
Iorrors, the local looked horrors, al
nd the manager arShiy remarked, RI RI
This floor shall fly from its firm base w
S soon as l." The chief and local an
TODD still u moment as if to gather in
lew fury, and then in concert they 81
prang upon the manager. Each y,
ucceeded in clutching the coveted tn
rize, and then came a pull = 81
trong pull, and pull altogether" M
n fact they pulled the bouquet into Al
billion pieces, and when they fin s.,
lily "let up" the most experienced