The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1880-12-07

"Dos BRowH, did you say that my
father had not a. much sense ~ Billy
Smiths Iittlc yellow dogP" "No, I
nsvcr said any such thing. I never
said that your father had not as much
sense ~ Billy Smiths little yellow dog. I.
All said was that Bfiiy's little yellow
d0Y had more senso than your father /;
that's all 1 eyer said" "Well, It's wall
you didn't ray the other, tell YOU"
TIE storyis told Of = prominent ac-
tr8Ss that on going TO tho theatre one
morning for rehearsal she relnem bored
that shc had left $50, 900 under tho pill
low or her bed at the hotel. A great
piece OF earelessness, Our wife naver
goes out and leaves $30, 900 under the
pillow Of heP bed,
THE senior Gresk professor, In his
lecture TO the Juniors tho other day
speaking OF tho marriage OF Venus aud
Vulcan, remarked that "the hand
s0ncBt wOihon generally marry tho
homel'est man." adding grtply,
"ThorB's encouragement for good
many OF YOU"
"ruE hoy vt the head Of tho class
VIII state what wore tho Dark Ages or
Tho world" hoy hositatss. IN ext---
Mastor Joaea, o4n you toll mo what
wore tho Rgos before speotaoles wei o
1hvont0d,' 500 to your BoHts."
JUST now tho 0nGwsphpor3 arc teem-
Ing with the paragraph, "Don't drink
lco"Whter when you are hot" and 1t IL
ono that should DO regarded by all.
Tho tlnlo to drink 0c-wntor IL along in
tho dead or Winter, when II is u tight
scratch To keep from freezing to death t.
A NAN had tho misfortune recently
to loSo his wife. Ovor tho gravs he
caused u stone to DO PLACED on which
In the depth OF I,is grlef no had order
I'D To DO ins0riblod:: "Tenrs cannot
restore lor---Cherof0re / weep"
iHE man who seeks 70 win q reputa-.
tion tor prodlgaI generosity by public.
ly astonishing sOm0 poor boggar with
tho presentation OF dollar. rarely
gurprlsoB his wash woman In that way
NAN la Iown has boon arrested for
assaulLing his own wlfo, and he was
found guilty, ovnn thongh it was
shown that he 0..l y stuffed hor mouth
run OF putty whom nc wanted TO 40 to
''>"P' NV A""h ""Fo -" ll&hIo ~ ail'
---.---
a NORFOLK man hns Invented u gas
meter with Y price lndi0ntor attached,
which shows In dollars nntl Cents tho
amount duo FOR gus. "A good idea, but
u moLor with Il gas blll-payor sttuchod
would hnd Il moro ready Bale."
------
LoRD BrOngham, on0e when ho WAS
IN u Iacetious mood, balnx asked u do
hno Iawyer, SAID: "A lawyer IL n
ns.S.o .,s lr1m your o"om'os ana keops IL
"'''"e''
..1,, ,n,,, =, ,,,u,.nns
,r ,",,.".r,,, :" "" w. o,'''o" y 'U"nk a".y
n,ntnh ~ shn n~"r',I,.j n, noti, -, t,'n y"
rrnwl,d nn n,,, h",,,,.I,S ~" "n.U,
crnn, ihr .,,roI, w,,, rni,. -; 'NH'S
''''
p,rr,,,, IN u.,,,,nn ,,,,,,
unh m,s"riv m. I how =" "'"v" wo. ,,H'" "",, ,Um"
"innn Iri,,, $780,, "" 10 .',W, @ h'.."'iR
"O Sir nn, Am nr ,,,n.n ,,,,'n t,i," -,
intnrnst rv"m IN ,hn nnnn,,,", Nv nt >n T,n.
cronluros. -
.--.
Nuvn, mt +, ,,u.,,, -, s,., ,no,,
OF an old silver ostabliahmont, If you
wuuld have II retain It's original lustro.
Whom IT. wants polish take u pioco Of
soiI lohlhor ana whiting and rub hard.
- -
hear"u '"tt,nS' no s"iu,'h MA sottcst
nro'n.s. ss' she yawheu, "lVe
ne"h n"PihS TO hoar a'uton Tor somo
,l"le. i'e o'a not oatl tho next oven
ing.
,,,,
shabby said Il young man bout
town, one rvrning rocnntly. ~ be.
'leVo Will haVo To strike anoLhor
prayer MootinY tho hrst ratAy uight."
In Washoc man WAS lriod for steal
ing milk at ulght from naother mans
COW. Tho jury found It an aggravated
o0cuco, and rondo.od word lot
"Gutlty OF milking tho COW In tho first
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