Smyrna times. [volume] (Smyrna, Del.) 1854-1987, 1880-12-01

~ Inc Nlhilists are thinking of making a
New Years call on the czar, if they can
get chance.
Some men would commit suicide if thew
old not have some woman around to blame
all their troubles on.
An Ohio woman named Mrs. Wells
eloped with her husbands brother. She
loved not wisely, but too Wells.
California is large State, but three men
carried it for the Democrats. Their names
are Barnum, Hewitt and Philip.
chestnut trees are greatly neglected in
TINS country. Every grove should be gwen
about one cart load of vermifuge.
" Two souls with but single thought
means that the parties are thinking that
they have been single long enough.
Considering the profits on his books,
Judge Iourgee's Southern trip was not so
much OF I" A Fools Errand" after all.
An exchange calls the loss of net puo
or canary bird "a slight bereavement, 2
out then 1t does not move in good society.
Most OF the inhabitants of New JERSEY
speak English and are much interested in
the progress being made by the people Of
the United States.
Boatmen are kept at each of the three
bridges at Rome, to rescue persons Mt.
tempting suicide. Rome must be prepar.
ing to take a census.
Al.
slderatlon. There is no telling who NAV
De the next one to fall heir to fortune
from some forgotten uncle.
Massachusetts has some 10000 more
women than men, and yet there are lust
as many fellows after the same girl in Mas.
sachusetts as anywhere else.
The fact that a daughter of Senator
Bayard was one Of the bridesmaids at tho
marriage Of Senator Cameron's daughter.
has no political significance
Now that it is known that the revised
edition of the Bible will contain the same
old ten commandments; fair.weather Chris.
tlans have lost all interest in it.
The world is made up of many men of
many minds, but there is one thing that all
agree on-One's own sister is never so in.
teresting as some other fellows sister.
Philip is willing to confess that he wrote
the Morey letter, provided that Truth will
be the first to publish it; he knows that in
such a case everybody will believe him in
nocent.
Plttsburg astronomer says the sun will
IN time use up all the planets as fuel. If
our earth should be shoveled into the furn
ace pretty soon how surprised Bob Inger.
sell would be-.
Miss Susan B. Anthony lectured in Prov.
dence last Sunday on the subject" Wo.
man Wants Not Bread hat the Ballot" If
that is the case woman Is easily satisfied.
Man wants both;
By new process in connection with
grinding wheat, what is known as "mid.
dlings" is rendered the most desirable part
OF the grain.-Er. 1t is much the same
with modern society.
A Philadelphia clergyman before cleo.
ton referred in his sermon to the wicked.
ness of betting. and not single Republi.
can in the congregation now has the cour.
age to go to church in a new hat.
1t is said that Mr.. English refused to dis.
tribute in Indiana the package of papers
containing the forged Morey letter sent
him by Barnum. English does not believe
with Barnum that there is no hereafter.
A man in Burks county has lust ended a
lawsuit of forty.two years standing, and
recovered six cents damages. He did not
make much to be sure, but he has the sat.
isfaction of knowing that he has paid for
the education of his lawyers children.
To dress we'll on a moderate sum re.
quires thought and care, and young lady
in that condition finds very useful some
skill in trimming and altering bonnets and
dresses.-Er. But the average young lady
does not need that skill half as much as
her married sister.
Forty years ago the first missionary was
eaten on tho FIJI islands. To-day forty
thousand young FUians attend Sunday
school. All the waste places of the world
could be Christianized in the same way,
but the trouble is to make a beginning
Missionaries willing to start the ball rolling,
or rather the pot boiling, are very rare, and
they would rather stay rare than be we'll
done.