davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
How to Drop Money at Church.
From the Boston Courier.l

We are frequently asked regarding the best manner of dropping money into the contribution box at church, and after care fully considering the subject we suggest the following rules First, if you feel particular ly mean and have only penny to bestow, you must keep it we'll covered in your hand, and when the box is under your nose you must, with quick, nervous motion, let your mite fnll so that 1t shall escape observa- tion; second, if you have quarter or any other silver coin of considerable size to you you may hold it in plain sight between your fore-fnger and when you deposit it you must let it drop from comparatively lofty elevation, so that it may make a musical jingle when it reaches it's destination third ly, if you contemplate offering a bill, you must not take the money out of your vest pocket until the happy time comes when your neighbor can best see your unparalleled generosity. The moment the collector ap- pears at the pew door is the one when you must tumble for your money, and then hay ing methodically unfolded the bill and put on your eyeglasses to ascertain it's denomi- nation, you may slowly place it on the top of the box. These three rules, we believe, will be sufficient for all ordinary purposes. N. B.-A button should always be placed in 8 blank envelope.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
BRICKS WITHOUT STRAW.

To the coal dealer-Learn to labor and to weigh it.
 A man cannot smoke cigar too short un- less he smokes it too long.
 q wish I was a pudding, mamma. '' "Why?" "'Cause I should have a lot of sugar put into me'
 'tFat Contributor Griswold thinks, Mot good if detached, " may apply as we'll to mar ried people as to railroad tickets.
 Blondes, it seems have gone out of fash ion, and many ladies will have to switch off. -Neoo York Commercial Adcertiser.
 It is said that James Redpath has become much in love with Ireland that he thinks of changing his name to Greenpath.
 Everything good in man leans upon something higher" as witness his reliance on lamp post when his legs prove faithless.
 An ex-prize fighter is postmaster in an eastern town. His old fighting nature is still in him and hardly a day passes that he doesn't lick an innocent little postage stamp.
 It was not bad comment on what some men call business" that an old German made in New York He said: ''Der bee pies go round der streets all day sheating each odder, and dey call it pizziness "
 Harvard Student (who has sjust failed in a Chinese sentence, to Professor. )-"Thou tea chest" Professor (furious) ).-''What! you dare to" Student (calmly proceeds) ).- ''Thou tea-chest most difficult language. Curtain.
 A stranger in Galveston asked an old resi- dent how malarial fever could be distin- guished from yellow fever. "As a general thing" was the reply, ''you can't tell until you have tried it. If you ain't alive, then it is most likely yellow fever"
 Mir Prigsby Cat dinner, to fair Knicker- booker on visit to Boston for the third or fourth time): 'I've heard you are so aw- fully, ah, clever, you know" Miss Sharp: Excuse me, Mir. Prigsby, you must have made mistake, for assure you I'm next to an idiot
 ''Yes, am up to my ears in business,' said Jones, swellingly. ''Well, there's no danger you'll ever get over them, Jones; not a bit of danger,' said Smith at the same time putting his thumbs to the tops of his own ears and Tapping his hands up and down like loose easement in the wind. Jones wonders what the deuce Smith meant.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
To Advertisers.
 Geo. P. ROvveIl & Co.'S Select List of Local Newspapers.

An advertiser who spends upwards of $5,oo0 year, and who invested less than $350 of it in this List writes: Your Select Local List paid better last year than all the other advertising diEa.'' It is not a Cooperative List.
 It is not Cheap List.
 1t is Honest List.
 The catalogue states exactly what the papers When the of paper printed in full face type it is in every instance the best. When printed in capitals it is the only paper in the place. The list gives the population every town and the circnla tion of every paper.
 The rates charged for advertising are barely one fifth the publishers schedule The price for single States ranges from g to $80 The price for inch month in the entire list is S625 The regular rates of the papers for the space and time $2,980 IA The list includes 952 newspapers of which 187 issued daily and 765 weekly They located in 788 different cities and towns of which 26 State Capi tals 363 places of 5000 population, and 468 Coun ty Seats For copy of List and other infermation address GEO. P. HOWELL CO,
 10 Spruce St., New York.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
A Buffalo Charges an Express Train.
 From the London TeleRraphl

High courage and a furious temper are generally admitted to be leading charistics of that formidable quadruped the buffalo but notwithstanding his reputation for boldness and ferocity we should scarcely have deemed him. capable of so desperate an enterprise as that involved in challenging railway train at full speed, had not a detailed account of his suc- cessfuI encounter with the evening express, leaving Pesth for Vienna on the 9th inst, ap- peared in the Austrian official journal. It seems that the train, travelled at the rate of thirty miles an hour, had to be pulled up short when approaching Rakes Station to avoid running down an enormous buffalo which had taken up a menacing attitude between the rails and there stood, snorting out defiance to it's advancing foe. The intre- pid animal had a few hours previously brought dry goods train to a standstin on the same spot, which he evidently regarded as the frontier of of his own especial domain, not to be violated with impunity by any iron monster that ever hurled along upon wheels. large party of the Staatsbahn's servants was assembled, with considerable trouble and loss of time the express and the buffalo re- mained stationary the while, facing one g. mother like two doughty but prudent adver- saries. After many fruitless attemts to drive the huge beast of the line the railway officials contrived to lasso him and tying his legs tightly together, to haul him bodily into an adjoining field. The Staatsbahn authorities have offered a reward for the discovery of his owner, whom they intend to prosecute for allowing so savage brute to be at large Meanwhile thd horned hero is in durance vile recieving, doubtless, all the consideration to brave prisoner of war.
 'sNever put a bib on child who has
 TI A., s---G
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
DIR. s. ". FISKE

DR. S. w. FlSkE.
 The Celebrated CiairvOyant Physician
 and Magnetic Healer, Business
 and Test Medium,
 Is permanently located in New Haven, Conn.
 OEace-No. 270 Chapel Street, :" HERE he be consulted regularly every w month from the morning of the 10th until the 27th at noon. Office hours from a m- to p. Dr. Fiske has had twenty-nine years experience in the practice of medicine, and has made thousands of the most astonishing cures of all chronic and long standing diseases of whatever nature. Those who afflicted with any disease pain should con suit Dr. Fisko at onee matter how long you have been out of health what diseases you suffering from, or how many doctors you have employed in vain, or how much medicine you have taken or how little faith you He will tell you na- trre of the disease and where it affects you the most and the progress it has made upon the system, and describe the symptoms thereof and will furnish medicines prepared the best selected roots to those who wish for their speedy and permanent at a reasonable price, either by the week month
 The doctor also gives valuable advice business matters, and the affairs of life, both social and financial incuding Journeys, lawsuits gains, losses absent friends and great in selecting lucky numbers SittingB for business affairs exArnina- ton of the sick, S1- Communications by letter upon business health must contain S2 age, lock ef hair and stamp Address Lock Box 1.25S, Norwich Gt TAKE NOTIOE.-Dr. Fiske will not visit Bridge port Ansonia again this Patients wishing to consult the Doctor will find him st his ofhce, 270 Chapel street, New Haven Conn. the days mentioned above He will also be at the City Hotel South Nor walk, Ct, Thursday and Friday, Got. 2Sfh and 18th.
 Uss Dr. s. V. FISKEs VALUABLE LINIMENT For sale by all Druggists
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

II Lu1S QOeS not maGer1aIly the cOnVGn- | fence of trade, it is idle and unremunerative
 It shows, however, gratifying pecuniary in dependence It means that eastern creditors
 are paid, that mortgages are cleared off, and that many people are out of debt.
 Rev. Thomas K. Beecher, of Elmira, New York, brother of Henry Ward Beecher, was the Democratic Greenback candidate for Con- gress in his district at the recent election He was defeated, and prophecies as follows in an address to the voters s'In six or eight years
 more of you will see as do the dangers that are looming above the horizon from the large corporations and the power of capital that will then unendurably oppress the obscure millions of small farmers, mechanics and workers. trust that the dangers will be
 foreseen early enough to forefend them witL- out waiting for the just judgments of God, in the overthrow of our Babel and the scat terlng of our army of cooperative industry" It looks as if the Canadians will pay dearly for their whistle in the matter of the North ern Pacific railroad. The E0ening 1eEegram I of Toronto says that the government is to give the syndicate 9, GOO, ,0OO acres of land along the route, 1925, 900, 900 in government
 bonds at five per cent. interest. and that
 part of the road which is already con-
 structed and in operation. together with
 all the surveys of the unconstruct-
 ed parts. The syndicate gives
 bond of $1, 100000 and a mortgage on the
 land to limited amount that 1t will operate
 the road when built The total subsidy from
 Canada will reach $1OO, COG, ,OOO. The gov
 ernment retains certain supervision of tar
 lf rates on passengers and merchandise, has
 stipulated for very low emigrant rates and
 also that the price of land along the route
 shall be low enough to place it in the reach
 of new settlers by it's terms of payment. The
 arrangements for the transportation of mails
 and government business are also favorable
 It is big load for Canada to assume.
 The manner in which southern men and
 southern newspapers have repudiated Bar
 num's fraud scheme is one of the most en- couraging signs of the times. The following from the Memphis Appeal is an illustration
 'The leading newspapers of the South, rep resenting the solid South and 13S Demo- cratic Electoral votes cast for Hancock, in- sist that neither Barnum nor the national committee shall take one step toward a con- test for the Presidency that will disgrace the national Democratic party. Like Hancock, they are satisfied that Garfield is elected, and they will not consent to course calculated to bring disgust and uneasiness to every part of the Union, and to bring our govern ment into contempt with foreign nations. General Garfield is President-elect by the suf frages of majority of the qualified electors of the United States, and will be inaugurated on the 4th of March next His title is indis putable." It is very evident that the Demo- cratic party is thoroughly despised by the better class of southerners It deserves to be-
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
EDITORIAL NOTES.

Some American preachers have been re- ceiying a circular from London dealer in sermons. He has sermons Autographed in a bold round hand, sure to be mistaken for manuscript, for twenty-five cents each, or $2O hundred. He has line of cheaper sermons in print, at ten cents apiece, 'twar- ranted orthodox" and others-a little more expensive-which have "a pleasantness, yet an awful solemnity, about them.''
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

HISTORY OF POLITICAL PARTIES and of the E Federal Government, from colonial times to the present date. Entirely new in design, cemprehen- sive and exhaustive, with beautifully co1ored maps and diagrams Contains all the platforms of politi- cal parties. The most valuable publication of the age. Non-paftisan. Should be in every household, school and library Issued in book form at s and wall chart at s. Agents wanted everywhere at once. Big pay. GRANGER, DAVIS & CO. Publish Ir,f1ia Iis Ind
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
ENCYCLOPEDIAs sE ETIOUETTEsBUSENESS

This is the cheapest and only complete and reliable work Etiquette and Business and Social Forms. It tells how to perform all the various duties of life, and how to appear to the best advantage all occasions Agents Wanted-Send for circulars containing full description of the work and extra terms to agents Address NATIONAL PUBLISHING CO, Philadelphia paTT
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

amount is not less than $50, GOO, 900 in gold since resumption went into effect While this does not materially disturb the conven- fence of trade, it is idle and unremunerative. It shows, however, gratifying pecuniary in dependence. It means that eastern creditors are paid, that mortgages are cleared of, and that many people are out of debt.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

If a Prohibitionist could not be happy in Kansas he could not be anywhere in this country At the last election the State elect ed radical Prohibitionist Governor by up- wards of forty thousand majority. It also adopted an amendment to it's constitution which forbids the manufacture, import and sale of intoxicating liquors, except for medici nal, scientific and mechanical purposes. The official canvass of the vote will shortly be made, and at that time the amendment will go into effect. Some of the lawyers in the State claiming that it will abrogate all i- censes heretofore granted by the votes of towns and cities.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
Halls Bitters.

Halls Bitters.
 ET is now twenty-nine years since we commenced the preparation of this article. Their truly val uabe medicinal properties, in connected with the stomach and system their exquisite taste a cordial agreeable effect tonic readily acknowledged by all who have used them In fact, Halls Bitters stand unrivaled and their over all newly started and much advertised Bitters will be striking any one after fair trial com parison- We should be pleased to show them.
 apA E. E. HALL, 250 Chapel Street.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

Several Improvements upon the plan to pension the oldest ex-President have been suggested. One of these, which strikes us favorably, is to so amend the Constitution that the President, at the expiration of his term of office, would become member for life of the United States Senate He would sit in that body as representative of the whole people, and his knowledge and expert ence of public affairs would help to make him a very useful Senator. It is also suggested that the Vice President be made, at the end of his term, life member of the House of Representatives. Meanwhile sub- come in.
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

First-Class Residence for Sale, 5E3 OWING to a contemplated change in business sii location the ensuing fall, offer my residence lglsL corner of East Grand and Ferry streets, for sale This is by far the finest place in Fair Haven Lot 131x230 feet, well stocked with every variety of fruit in bearing condition. House built of founda- don stone, contains ten rooms, all heated by steam also gas and water stationary range and wash tubs Large barn and carriage house; accommodations for five horses; gas and water: for man. Large hennery and garden. Parties meaning business can apply the premises.
 my3I If FREDERICK W. BABCOCK.
 TO RENT.
 %g43 DESIRABLE Furnished Room will be EsaiiH rented to one or two gentlemen. Call at IElU 26 ELM STREET, myl3 If Corner Orappe
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

Much speculation has existed in financial circles as to what has become of the coin and currency sent West about year ago. It has not flowed back eastward. nor is it in the west ern banks. As the amount was greatly in excess of current use by the people, the only inference is that great deal of it is being hoarded. This view is endorsed by the St. Louis Globe Democrat, which thinks the
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

'sNever put bib on child who has poor appetite. It will be sure to go against his stomach. Boston Journal ef Commerce,
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17
Cures by Absorption, Natures Way.
YOU GAN BE RELIEVED AND CURED

Don't despair until you have tried this Sensible, Easily Applied and RADICALLY EFFECTUAL Remedy: Sold by Druggists, sent by mail re- ceipt of Price, $S %, by
 Detroit, Mich. Send for Testimonials and book, Three Millions Year" Sent free
Morning journal and courier., 1880-11-17

The Celebrated CiafrvOyant Physicia and Magnetic Healer, Business
 and Test Medium,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07
Borrowing.

THERE are some people to whom bor-
rowing seems as natural as breathing :;
who might almost be said to make a
profession of it; who appear to have a
decided preference for the goods with
which the gods provide others; who are
never so well satisfied as when using the
tools of another; who feel more secure
from the assaults of the weather under
another's umbrella, better mounted on
friends horse, better dressed in anoth-
er's fnery; who would sooner borrow a
book than read their own; who might
naturally be supposed to banker after
another mans shoes. It does not by any
means follow that the ready borrower is
always the willing lender. Farmer
Roug henough may have used his neigh
boris harness as long as it would hold
together, but if it is limited that he
should make return with his new
pillow, he begins to feel as if some inn
position were being practiced upon him
for the first time in his life, perhaps, he
begins to look through the spectacles of
the lender. There is the person who
borrows of you in order to be on init
mate terms; the one who borrows only
to oblige, not to seem superior to his
neighbours: he who borrOws car tickets
and postage stamps-things too tritiing
to make an impression on his robust in
tellect; who damages whatever is lent
him, and pays no attention to the fact;
who will bring your horse home famed,
as if that were the normal condition of
horses, return your umbrella with bro
ken ribs, your books with fnger-prints
and pencil-marks. The borrower has
usually bad memory, and worse
conscience: the fact of his being OBJ
liged to borrow at all arises generally
from improvidence, a lack of fore
thought, or an abuse of his own property;
and he who takes no care of his own
will hardly be scrupuIous in the care of
another's. In the mean time we en-
counter not only those who borrow your
personal effects and your household
Penates, but your opinions, your witt
cisms, which they kindly pass off as
their own; who Z" never think of think
ing for themselves at ALL, since it is so
much easier to adopt somebody else's
thoughts, with the advantage of not
being expected to return them. Doubt
less the borrower was sent into the
world to discipline those whom his tricks
and ways irritate; and it is barely pos
sible that if the soul of the good house
keeper were not wrung at times by the
temporary surrender of some posses
sion into needless hands, she might also
be found among the number of those
who piece out their own negligence and
wastefulness by taking advantage of
the better management of their friends.
-Hayper'S Bazaar.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07
A Successful Balloon Ascent.

A BALLOON ascent was made at Cher.
bourg. on the occasion of the fete given
by the municipality to M. Grevy, by M.
Perron and Captain Gauthier. The gene
raj direction of the wind being from the
land to the sea, a Government steamer
was sent out to secure the safety of the
aeronauts if necessary. Before starting
not less than thirty pilot balloons were
sent up to ascertain the superposition of
the aerial currents. It was proved that at
400 meters the wind was blowing from
the sea. After having travelled for more
than an hour in the direction of Ports
mouth, the ,aeronauts opened their valve
and returned safely on shore. More
than a. hundred thousand spectators
witnessed the experiment. The culmin
ating point Of the ascent was an altitude
of i,5OO, meters, where the travellers
could see the English coast, the whole
of the Isle of Wight, etc. The scenery
is said to have surpassed description.
Some very curious observations were
made on the coiors of the sea. In the
places where the water IS very deep it
looks quite inky, and the curves of level
are So clearly manifested that they bear
comparison with the equidistant lines
worked on ordnance maps. When trav-
cling at 50 great an altitude ships can be
detected with some difficulty; but smoke
can be seen, even when the smoke pro-
ducing steamer can hardly be perceived
with the naked eye.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07

An Altoona youth is Disguised With
the subject of ice-cream. Don't men,
ton it to him unless you are " spiling
for a fght.'' He invited his girl to an
ice-cream saloon, and they ordered
peach and vanilla. Suddenly he ex-
cused himself for moment and left the
room. He didn't come back, and his
absence is explained by the fact that af-
ter he was seated in the saloon he dis
covered that what he supposed was a
ten-cent piece was q tin tobacco tag.
Perhaps you have frequently been fooled
by these things yourself. You see one
on the pavement and you 60 to pick it
up, installing it for dime. But all is
not dime that glitters.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07

"A Boston boy, whose family are at
Newport for the summer as usual, writes
to his youthful chum at Mt. Desert
about the fox hunt: 'It's aregler fraud.
They stick tame fox into a box and
let him out, an all run after him on
horseback. There amt any real hunt
about it. It's twice as much fun chas-
ing cats over the back fence up to our
house. They try to get away, and a
feller's got to look out or he'll break a
leg or get licked by the muckers if he
run into Charles Street, an there's some
fun in it, but this is n. g. I should
think them big fellers would be tired Of
it,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07

"A little three-year-old son of Mr..
Foyle, station agent at Edgartown,
Pipestone County, Mimi, by some
means got hold of loaded revolver I'M
noticed, and said: "Pa, I'm going to
Shoot Mr.. Foyle paid no attention to
the child, and the little fellow again told
him he was going to shoot. Just at
that moment Mr.. Foyle reached up for a
book that he wanted, when bullet
went crashing through his arm from the
pistol in the hands of his boy.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07
"A little tbree-rear-old son If \

"A little three-year-old son of Mr..
Foyle, station agent at Edgartown,
Pipestone County, Mimi, by some
means got hold of loaded revolver I'M
noticed, and said: Spa, I'm going to
shoot.' Mr.. Foyle paid no attention to
the child, and the little fellow again told
him he was going to shoot. just at
that moment Mr.. Foyle reached up for a
book that he wanted, when bullet
went crashing through his arm from the
pistol in the hands of his boy.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07
lBoston Daily Globe.1
New ENGLAND Pc r,Snnnl

Edwin A. Wadleigh, Esq, Clerk Superior
Court, Boston, Mass, adds his name to the
joyous army using and recommending St.
Jacobs Oil. He certifes to a cure by the
Great German Remedy of neuralgia and rheu-
matte pains in his family.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-10-07
Confident. Reliable.

In writing of the warmers Safe Rene
dies" of which H. H. Warner & Co. are pro-
says: 1--WE say all this that is good of them
as we have perfect faith in the efficiency of
their preparations and unbounded faith in
the truth of all that is said good of them"