davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19
Splinters.

A Boston man has made piano from
stone.
Prof. Huxley has been lecturing in
London on Dogs"
What the carpets are saying: "Shake."
-Ne,0 York Graphic.
Misunderstanding that is thumbped in
laying down carpets.-PhiLadelphia Bulletin.
The Syracuse Herald has great fears that
Courtney's ma won't let him go out on the
water.
One Lloyd Hopkins, of Virginia, tried,
the other day, to eat twenty molasses
cakes and died.
In England, when one woman wants to
compliment another en- her sprightliness
and vivacity, she says: " guess you're full
Of feas."
If boards, says the Boston Courier, denote
high degree of civilization, as has heen
asserted, what magazine of culture a Billy
goat must be.
A Wisconsin girl broke of her engage.
ment because her lover had no romance.
She wanted 10 be married on stills, and he
wouldn't agree.
The New Hampshire Register believes in
the scarcity of the ice crop, and thinks ice
cream will be frozen " in the shade of the
North side of the house this Summer"
Miss Biddy McGinnis, reading the last of
the Herald famine subscription reports
"Faix, it's hoping l am some of me own
folks is amgston thin disthrest !"-Puck.
A Syracuse dentist has large, mirror be-.
fore his operating chair in order that
patients can see the expression of their
faces as the tooth begins to start at the roots.
The trouble with California seems to be
that too many missionaries have passed
beyond it to wrestle with people who are
orderly and well behaved.-Detroit Free
Press.
The queen has declined to let the prince
and princess of Wales occupy Windsor
castle during the Ascot races unless thew
will allow her to revise the list of their
guests.
A ons.legged New Haven man recentIy
stole picture of his wife, from whom he
had been separated, and she retaliated by
stealing his wooden leg which soon brought
him to terms.
Missouri women are frail creatures. One
OF them peppered tive tramps with shot.
gun and knocked down a third with a
hatchet, and then tainted dead away.--
Detroit Free Press.
The duchess of Marlborough has declined
to receive testimonial +" for her energy
in the work of Irish relief, on the prsusd
that she has simply done hsr duty and
desires no reward for it.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

and bridegroom, and the bridegroom re
spends, the more briefly the better. If il
is wished to drink the health of the brides
maids the bridegroom proposes it and the
best man responds. 1t is quite obsolete to
drink the health of the parents, the object
being to curtail the speeches as much rs
possible. Previous to her health being
drank the bride cuts the cake, of which #
is obligatory that every one should eat a
tlny peace, and then retires to change her
dress, about quarter of an hour after
which the guests adjourn to the drawing.
room. VI course, at afternoon weddings
there is no sitting down meal, only a buffet,
with such refreshments as are given at
large afternoon parties, with the addition
OF the wedding cake. When the adieux
are over two white shoes, at least, should
be thrown-one by the chief bridesmaid
and the other by the best man. 1t ia the
farewell OF the unmarried to those who
nave just left their ranks. If rice is thrown
at all, 1t should be by the matrons, and not
0y the young ladies'
AFTER THE WEDDING.
The wedding of widow differs in some
respect from that Of girl She cannot
wear orange flowers or a simple veil or be
married in white; but must select gray.
Vellet, lavender, or some other color and
wear bonnet with veil. She can have
no bridesmaids nor are faVers given, and
as a general rule, the wedding is a quite
one and there is no break fast. The wed
ding OF a widower is in no respect different
from that of bachelor, but if he has
daughter it is not in good taste that she
should be bridesmaid. After the depart
ure OF the bride and bridegroom the party
at once breaks up, and in London it is not
customary to have any festivity in the
evening. 1t is no longer usual to send
cake or cards to friends at a distance, and
people discover for themselves when the
young people return from their wedding
tour, and call at their own convenience.
when the bride reappears in society, she,
the hrst time she appears in any house,
takes precedence OF every one, no matter
how high the rank. This continues for
three months, after which she is no longer
considered a bride. The custom is. how.
ever, beginning to fall into disuse, except.
ing IN rural districts; the bridegroom does
not obtain any precedence. The bride
generally wears her wedding dresses for her
first dinners and parties; the orange bios
SONS must be removed, as they are only
permissible on the wedding day. MANY
brides. however, prefer to keep their we'd.
ding dress for their presentation at court,
adding to it a low bodice and train, and
there is not the slightest nsces>ity that
they should wear white at their first parties
unless they should wish it. Many prefer
not to do so,
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

A PARAGRAPH OF THE FUTURE.-Time, A,
D., 1900. The necessity for church. going
and edifices is almost dispensed with. The
Rev. DR.. Turgid, from the central sdifice OF
the Sacred Telephone, breaches every Sun.
day to five thousand families of his per.
suasion in the privacy of their homes
The musical adjuncts to the service, vocal
and instrumental, are also dispensed by
telephones, and as waited to the five
thousand homes by electricity each family
joins in the hymn. The average attention
to service is much greater now than a
quarter of a century since, as the ladies
have not each others dresses and bonnets
to look at,
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

NRGRo's THANKs.-An Irish beggar.
woman, having received the loan of a shil
ling, expressed her thanks by saying
"May you live till return it to you" We
think, however, that the thanks of the
negro of whom this story is told in New
York World were better yet:
Some time ago, one of Arkansas most
widely known statesmen, who is now dead
was passing along street in Little Rock,
when an old colOred man, who had once
belonged to him, took off his hat, and pas
ssd hand over his white wool, as he asked
" Marster, gin de ole man fifty cents"
Dan, you are a robber l'
"How2" asked the astonished darkey,
opening his eyes, around which roughshod
age had walked.
Didn't you see me put my hand into
my pocket?"
"Yas, sah."
"Well, you old rascal, you rob nae of the
pleasure of giving you money without
being asked" The old gentleman re-
ceived one dollar. Bowing almost to the
ground, while tears came from his eyes, he
replied:
"Marster, wild rich heart as you hab
and wild Abraham, and Isaac, and de Lord
on your side, don't see what can keen
you out of heaven"
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19
DOWN WITH THE LIQUOR TRAF.
FIG.
FROM GARRETTS HUNDRED SELECTIONS IN PROSE AM
VERSE"

VERSE"
Down with the traffic! down! we say!
And saying it, we mean it,
Tear off the tiimsy veil of law
The people use to screen il.
On, for trumpet voice to wake
The public Indignation,
AS when the fire on SumterS walls
Reused us to desperation.
Hath it not stung us long enough?
Break up this nest of adderSl
Down with this awful powder house,
Out with the hooks and ladders!
Turn out the dealers-not to die
Or pine of sheer starvation:
But earn their bread like honest men
The common population.
Take up the papers. how ye read
shot i'll row this morning.
Killed on the railroad: too drunk
TO heed the whistles warning"
Stabbed in lager beer saloon"
Drowned, in western river;
man plunged headlong DER a bridge
All by drunken driver"
Died; Mary R aged twenty two;
Policeman in his duty
Had brought her to the tombs that day.
A sad and drunken beauty"
" Riot, one harmless man shot down.
The drunken wretches fleeing"
Neck broken; gay young man upset,
Rash driving; caused by spreeing."
% Fell from the platform of the cars!
A drunken man was standing,
The rapid train approached curve
And that was his last landing"
Took opium, leaves family"
Oh there is silent weeping,
And only bitter tears fall where
A drunken fathers sleeping
And thus we read from day to day
These horrors sad and solemn,
As graveyard moves, in awful march
The long and dark death column,
Down with the ruffian traffic! down
And break its bonds asunder!
And let the nations say Amen"
n loud and choral thunder.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

A woman in New York accidentally went
to church with two bonnets on ker head
one stuck inside the other-and the
women inside the congregation almost died
of envy, They thought it was new kind
Of bonnet, and too sweet for aRythiRg,-
Nr1p Orleans PcnInlne
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

For the last forty years Barefoot Walker
has not had his feet covered. He was EN-.
ployed as a farm hand near Columbus, Ca,
although in his ninety.sixth year. On Sun
day he apparently died, and at his funeral,
when persons were bending over his coffin,
he sat up and asked why he was thus
treated. He still lives
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Professor Theophilus Parsons, who has
long been one of the most widely-known
and often cited of American law writers, is
still at the ripe age of eighty.ssven, enjoy
ing good bodily health and mental vigor, at
his beautiful home in Cambridge, Massa-
chusetts.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19
For the Smyrna Times.
Methodist History on the Peninsula

Our Conference commenced its session in
Philadelphia April 10Th, 1919 Many years
had elapsed since one had been held in
Smyrna, and Robert Patterson and Daniel
Mcdowell petitiOned this Conference to
have its next >itting in this place, and their
request was granted. Many of the inhabi.
tants here, however, were dissatisfied with
the arrangement, AMI c+nsurcd the men
who had used their influence to III ocure it.
Robe Pt Pattelson heard so much said in
opposition to Its ueeting here, that he re-
piled he would entertain the Conference
himself.
When the time arrived 10 ascertain how
many homes could he found for to welcome
the preachers there was sutficency. On
April 18th, 1920, the Conference commen.
ced. remember the preachers that were
entertained at my fathers house There
were Bishop George and Robert Burch, his
Secretary, Joshua Soule, who some wears
after was made Bishop, Daniel Hitt Ezekiel
Cooper, James Smith, Presiding Elder, and
DR.. Francis Waters, President of Washing.
ton College, Chestertown, Maryland,
The Friends let the Methodists have the
use of their Meeting House for the Con.
ference to transact their business in daily.
The pulpit of the NJ. L. Church was occu.
pied three times day by ministers, who
preached profitable sermons. The people
were so much pleased that some of them
said they would sign their names three or
four times to petition to have the Con.
ference here again.
The ingress of so many preachers into
our quiet little village was novel sight, and
somewhat excitative. Many arrived on
horseback, some in private carriages, and
others in stages. At the south end of the
village an unusual and prolonged team
made its appearance, which was recognized
by some as Gig d Tandum. What could it
mean? Our eyes were not accustomed to
behold even sinners riding in that style.
Nearer and nearer it approached, till at
length it halted before the door Of Judge
Davis, and two of our planest old fashion
ed Methodist preachers alighted Joseph
| Osborn, and John Collins, When ques-
toned about their stylish mode of convey
ance they gave a very sensible explana,
tion, saying the roads were in such bad
condition, that they adopted this plan OF
travelling for convenience only. hearty
laugh was the result, and no more was
thought about it.
On Sunday morning Bishop George
| preached an ordination sermon from Phil
ippians, 3-13, IA. "The JUNCTION of the
mighty one rested on him and his audience u
Mrs. Rhoda Corbitt, the eldest daughter OF
Judge Davis, was converted under the
sermon and shouted. Four preachers were
ordained-Charles Pitman, James Long,
Samuel Grace, and VIM. Wright. "Chas.
Pitman had a noble frame, massive brow,
an expressive eye, and a voice as deep
toned as an organ. Bishop Hedding CON.
sidered him the greatest pulpit orator he
had ever heard" SPIN.
SMYRNA, April 25th, 1880.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

About thirty thousand generous Ameri.
cans will cross the Atlantic this season and
give back to the poor Europeans the money
they were obliged to spend last winter for
American graiB,
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Cough says that when he told 5000 people
in Exeter Hall of Mrs. Hayes's great moral
courage in refusing to offer wine to her
guests at the White House they instantly
gave three cheers.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

This is what is commonly called "grow-
ing weather." and it is almost possible to
see the grass grew and the leaves come out,
SO rapid is the progress of vegetation.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Philadelphia men are proverbially tenn
psrats. The houses are so much alike that
the incorporate soon get killed off in mis-
take for burglars.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

The telephone will never be popular in
Texas. The people down there like to be
within pistol range when they converse. 1t
saves time and prevents future misunder.
standings,
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

A Germantown bachelor, whose name is
suppressed for the sake of his mother, says
courtship is the ics-crsam, marriage the
cornbesfand. cabbage Of life.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

At Chester, Pa, on last Saturday, while
John Mccullough, hodcarrier, was going
up ladder on new building, one Of the
rounds broke, letting him fall from tho
secondstory to the basement below. He
struck the rafters in the fall, and injured
himself SO badly that he died in few
hours.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

1t is to be decided by legal authority just
what constitutes a gentleman" in Eng
land. Whether the legal authorities are
competent to decide such a question will
be known in due time.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

People who are alarmed at thunder and
lightning will rejoice to hear that thunder
storms of unusual severity are predicted
for the ensuing summer. Weather prophe.
sizes generally 60 by opposites.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

A society for the Suppression of amateur
brass. bands is badly needed, now that
people sleep with their windows up.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Many mothers called their daughters
early on the first Of May, but very few re-
sponded promptly.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

The force of habit is finely illustrated by
the we'll known fact that a woman's will is
seldom contested.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

When strange dog shows his teeth and
holds bis tail perfectly still do not walk
any farther. Wait for the wagon.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Rev. Mr.. Talmage preached on rsvivaIs
at the Tabernacle, Brooklyn, on last Sun.
day, and said he hoped to save ten thou.
sand souls, with the aid of the telegraph
and other modern improvements.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19
A Box's SoNe.-

A BOY's SoNG.-
Sing. sing
OF the early spring,
And sing Of the dark blue water;
And sing of him
Who went TO swim,
When he knew that he hadn't oughter
And sing of the knot
That somehow got
A place for itself in his garments;
And sing Of his grief,
When the cry of "chaw beefm
Saluted his ears from the 'varmints'
Who tied II there.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

The YOUNG PREACHER AND LAWYER
The young preacher has an advantage ever
the young lawyer or doctor. As soon as 10
completes his studies he steps into salary
which, if not large, is sufficient for him to
marry on. But his classmate who takes to
the law or medicine will find it a long
time before the clients or patients will be
numerous enough to pay his expenses.
For long time it will remain q QUESTION
whether he is ever going to be able to
make llviHg by his profession. If the
young lawyer or physician once acquires
living practice, his futuue is secure. But
the test does not come with the preacher
till later in life. The question with the
lawyer or doctor is whether he can gain a
position. The question regarding the
preacher is whether he can hold his posi-
tien. If, conteHted with the popularity
of his early efforts, he settles down and
"takes things easy" he will find at middle
life bis position is slipping away from him,
and he is left whore the lawyer and doctor
were at the beginning. The preachsr's
future is not secure unless he spends his
early ministry in the hardest kind of study
and the hardest kind of work. The doubt.
full point with him is always in the future,
therefore he can never stop work.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Never judge man by bis clothes. 1t
does not require much talent or virtue to
be well dressed.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Never judge a man by his clothes. 1t
does not require much talent or virtue to be
we'll dressed.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19

Congressman are beginning to "talk
about the weather" sure sign Of an early
adjournment.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19
Women Census Enumerators.

In many parts of the county women will
be appointed as census enumerators, with
the probable result something like this:
Neatly dressed woman of an uncertain
age, with big book in her arm and pen in
hand, rings the doorbell. Young lady ap.
pears at the door.
Census Enumerator -"Good morning.
Lovely morning. I'm taking the census.
You were born?'
Young Lady" Yes'm."
Your name, please? What q pretty
dust-cap you have on. Can get the pat.
tern? It's just like the one the lady in the
next house has. Let's see, your name ?"
" haven't the pattern. Don't you get
awful tired walking round taking the cen
sus?"
"Oh, yes, it's wearisome, but pick up a
great deal of information. How nice your
dinner smells cooking. Plum pudding ?'
La Maine. No, haven't plum. pudding
to-day. I'm looking for a new recipe"
I've got one that | took down from a
lady's cookbook across the way. Are you
marrisdP"
mo. Want an invitation to the we'd.
ding, don't you? 1t will be long time he.
fore you get it. You can keep your plum.
pudding recipe, thank you"
"I sh'd think 'twould be some time.
Have you chill? o, of course, l forgot.
This hall carpet is just the pattern of Aunt
Frudy's. She's had it more than twenty
years. How many are there in the family?''
" If this hail carpet don't suit you, YOU
can get off from it and go about your cen.
susIng"
"Well, you're an impudent jade, anyhow.
You haven't told me when you were born
or what's your name, or when you expect
to get married, and there's ten dollars fine
for not answering the census.take ers' oues.
tions, and if was you wouldn't be seen
at the door in such a slouchy morning
dress-so there"
ooh, you hateful thing. You can lust
go away. I'll pay ten dollars just to get
rid of you, and smile doing it. It's none
of your business, nor the censuses' either.
No, it isn't. You can keep your pattern
and your plum-pudding and your saucy,
impudent questions to yourself. IL"
Good morning. must be getting on.
l haven't done but three families ali the
forenoon" and an energetic bang of the
door just missed catching a foot of her
trailing dress.skirts.-Neio Haven REGISTER.
Smyrna times., 1880-05-19
AT THE BREAKFAsT TABLE.

The menu should include soup, cold
salmon, mayonnases of lobster and chicken,
hot outlets, chaudfroid of chicken, lark
quail or something of that kind, cold lamb,
chicken, ham, tongue and sweets. The
table must be prettily arranged with fruit
and flowers, the dishes being generally
ornamented with silver cosaques, etc, and
the menus printed in silver. Champagne
is indispensable, and sherry and claret are
likewise offered. Neither tea nor coffee is
offered, and ice is matter of taste, which
is as eften omitted as Rot. II is the wise
custom Of the day to abolish speeches as
much as possible. The guests of the high.
est rank proposes the health of the bride
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1880-01-10
HallOWell Local News.

>,L,,r,
'"' NV W.
supply the Baptist church at Haiioweli next
SUNDAY afternoon.
4, ,h, l,st r,cuI,r meetipy of the Reform
''u" Tue '"'''""'H VIM ''
the present quarter:
Edwin ID. Lee President: John 4. Hop
kins. Ezra j. Philbrook. John Heath, Vice
Presidents: f. A. \. Heath. John Hall.
Secretaries John \. Hopkins, Treasurer:
Rev. F. Groyenor. Charlain; Samuel :.
George, Scrgcaut-at-armS. The pubic meet
ings at the vestrics of the several churches
are to bc continued for the present.
kcunehec County Reform Club met IN
quarterly session yesterday. at = T. NJ
Officers present. Arno Little of liaii""sii'
President; +. \. \. Heath OF iiailowe"'
Secretary {. IL. Berry OF Gardiner, treas
urcr.
The meeting was opened with rraHer ny
Rev. +. Grovenor OF liali'"eli. Inc 1""""
ing committees were then arp"inteea
On rcsolut'ons-7J- IA 'Sgo"u ''"ro,mtr
James Lowe, hinton; IL. NJ perry III
throp ;, ,
Location OF session., ~ l. hu'"' u,
Gardiner - H. n,,'H' ""''i'''' w. u
pati"r'"' "''""' co,,,, ,,.,.
","vr VI "uS ,,>.,-,.S cn,ch.l, I,,rI,.
~. ~ ~
"e,'' ,,,,1, H., TX o.
EARNEST ie,i''N I ,J,S ., h., h.r,
N"o" y, .-hri.,, Cop,rast.d his
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1880-01-10

The above named company. composed of
some of Portland's leading citizens with head
quarters at No. 30, Exchange street on Tues
dav struck their vein in the shaft AT a depth
of only ~ feet. The shaft i about - feet west
of their cross cUt. The vein now reached
discIoses immensely rich ore. and H. progress
is made few feet more it will be still richer
The Supt. Mr.. Gardner Floyd. has forwarded
to the companv's office large box of ore tax
en- from tie vein ard It i nov on cXhini-
ton Massachusetts and New Hampshire
experts who visited this mine yesterday
and the dav before pronounce it the richest
showing vet made on the entire lode. \
night and day shft are working in the
most satisfactory manner. One shift j.
now trimming and timbering the shaft pre-
paratorv 10 further progress. y we'll known
and acknowleded mining expert. with scv-
cral wears experience. one day this week de-
clarcd the Forest City Company loca-
ton to be one Of the best in the whole I.eb-
anon-Acton region and at once subscribed for
large block of shares in thu Forest City
Company AZ tn regular treasury price.
The first in>tallment of treasury stock has
been disposed of and no more will be issued
at present The remarkably favorable prog
resS of this Company's work at Acton places
its stock equal with the Acton at II cents.
with prospect of still further immediate adj
vance.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1880-01-10
NEW YORK.
Death of n Deiaulter.

New YORK, January .. The defalcation
and death of Benz. c. Bogert, late Treasurer
of the Produce Exchange, was the sole and
absorbing topic of conversation in ard around
the Exchange this forenoon. Superiutend-
cent Grant knew nothing of the matter except
what was published. Mr.. Bogert. he said.
was appointed Treasurer of the Exchange III
1861. and had served in that capacity up 10
the present. except for Il brief period in 1854
and 1865.
L,rrH-It is said the death Of Benj. Bo-
CERT. Treasurer of the Produce Exchange.
was caused by laudanum, taken with suicidal
intent.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1880-01-10
FORTY-SIXTH CONGRESS,
FIRST SESSION.
House.

WASHINGTON, Ian. 9.
Among the bills introduced and referred
was one by. Mr.. Ryan, admitting. free of
duty, clothing and other articles destined for
colored emgrants.
No business of importance was transacted
during the morning hour.
Bill for the relief of colored cmigrants, re-
ferred To Committee on Ways and Means.
Bill for removing political disabilities of
w. $. Maxwell of Tenn. WIN. Sharp of Va,
VIM. Parker of Mary land passed.
\ large number of pension bills were re-
ported and placed on the calendar
The House went into Committee of the
Whole on private calendar: passed bills.
and
Adjourned until Monday.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1880-01-10
Chilly of Wrong.

Some people have fashion OF confusing
excellent remedies with the large mass OF
''patcnt medicines" and in this they are
giilty of wrong. There are some adver
tised remedies fully worth all that is asked
for them, ard one at least we know of-Hop
Bitters. The writer has had occasion to use
The Bitters in just such climate as we nave
most of the year in Bay City, and has al
ways found them to be first-class and reiia-
ble doing all that is claimed for them
Tribune