The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1880-08-10


Kidney Wort effectively acts at the
eame time on Kidneys, Liver and Bow
els. - Ta,-a
A man is supposed to be in his prime
at forty, unless'be knocks his prirning
ont before that time.
A good conversationlist may make
himself heard at feast; but the small
boy takes the cake.
A sermon should never be so short
that the women will not have time to
take fashion notes.
Turkey can't borrow dollar for war
purposes, and yet she wants to fight
eyersbody-and exer,thing. AZ. q
Give New England man chance to
guess at Che weight Of live hog and
you may make him happy for a whole
day. So H
Miss Saloma Bnrkett. the gir who
vas so horribly outraged by circus men
at Greenburg, Pa, last week, has identi-
Hed twelve oil her assailants.
Governor Stanford, and wife of Cali
fornia, went to see .The Danites" in
London the other night and Mrs. STAN
ford wore $1,000 worth OF diamonds.
"A lightning rod agent was struck By
Hghtning the other day, and tbe phenomr
enon can only be accounted for. on the
theory tha.the electric fluid got tired Of
being lied about.
II didn't know" said an old lady. as
she laid down her newspaper, that
thieves we're 90 scarce that they had to
advertise for 'em and offer reward for
their discovery"
sIskpov victim Of tobacco.' said Q
lecturer, 1whO hasn't tasted food for
Thirty wears" "How do you know he
hasn't?' asked an auitor because
tobacco killed tim in 1885," was the
reply.
"How c,me you to fail in your exam
instionss3 asked the tutora Il thoughi
crsmmed you.thoroughly y Law ell, you
see," replied the student, sthe fact was
you) erammed me SO tight I couldn't get
It OUT"
Seven Leavenworth doctors gathered
around q man who feli on the walk. -
Four called it case or sunstroke, and
the, other three said twas q fit Along
came small boy and proved that 1t was
. banana peel.
Women that have been pronounced Ia
curable by the best physicians in the
country, have been completely cured Of
female weakness by the use OF LYDIA e.
PINKHzA s VEGETABLE.sCo CoMPoUND.. Send
TO Mrs. Lydia E. Plnkbam, 233 Western
Avenue, +, M, Mass for pamphlets.
Going home from church che remark.
ed 20 her husband: 'sDid yeu notice that
baldkeaded man in frontsof us, and how
young be lookedp l never saw any one
20 young before with bald head. -,
Then he silenced her by replying: "My
dear, was baldheaded before was a
year DID,"
"Look hesh, squire, dars niggah In
Galveston what's been sassin' me; sup,
posing Z jes maul de Fife outen him fp-
Tie lawyer replied: .You would he apt
to get your neck stretched" "Now,
boss, you is jokin'1 What do white
folks care for one niggah noah or less
now de census is done tuck !"
A droll fellow fshed rich old gen
tleman out ola mill-pond and refused
the Offer of tBenty.fve cents from the
rescued miser. "Oh, that's too much |"
exclaimed he tsiD't worth it" and he
handed back twenty one cents, saying
calmly, as he pocketed four cents, "that's
about s;ght.r ~ e
An Englishman related that while at
Naples recezsfg terrific storm came up
Just as be and dis wife we're sitting down
i0 tee, during whieh flie latter was
struck bv lightning and burned to ashes.
IN, God. what did voa do 7" a.ked a.
Mortified listner. II rrag for servant
and said: John, sweep up, my lady ~
1t may all he well enough for young,
engaged couplee to feel thrill of happi-
ness st thrirs own bright pictures of
nice little cottage home, while they are
corning hotter one, but they will real
ize The problem OF married life when
they are visited by their uncle with his
wife and E,ar children, and the young
couple have not one spare bed in the
house - Goponda Enterprise:
Gen. Sherman has reached ST Louis
from his rortl,ein tour, which extended
to Winnipeg. in the British possessions
He will rest few days in that city with
his daughter, Mrs. Fitch. Soon after
leaving Winnipeg he visited the Dal-
rymple wheat fam of $4,000 acres, the
owner Of which expects to make SlC0,-
ono this year Sitting Bull is out in the
Wood Mountains. 500 miles west of
" ,nsipeg, an Object Of disllast to all
lie Manitobabs.