Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1880-03-11
ya,ee of the Hun,orist.

Voice of the Huulorist. =
A large boy lay on to an infantile chap.
Because be remarks that he lies;
His comrades around to avert mfshap
Tell him to take one OF his size. :.
A maiden all fair gives her lover the
Which causes him grief and surprise,
And as she does the sad tidings an.
nounce,
She takes, we say, one of his sighs.
There's noise on the street, of terri
BILE brawl,
The policeman to quiet it flies,
And finds that one rough another did
maui
And had taken one of his eyes.
--Narathon Independent.
A petrified body, we learn from
the Chicago Tribune, indicates that
the man is stone dead.
Casar's motto was always to be
first, but when it comes to fighting
duel we prefer to be second.-Boston
Post.
"This," said the mother, as she
piled the slipper to the boy across
her knee, represents the rise and
fall of leather
sDoes your wife play euchre"
asked one. "No," replied the other
rubbing his head, ''but she is death
on poker"
Notwithstanding all the modern
improvements of husbandry, the
matrimonial harvest is still gathered
with the cradle and thrashed by
hand. E EtTft
Ebenezer Elliott, the famous,
"Corn-law Rhymer," on Communism: !:
'What is a Communist? One who
hath yearnings
For equal division of unequal earnings; !;
Idler or bungler, or both, he is willing
To fork out his penny, and take up
your shilling"
You never see q woman button
anything she can pin, and you never
see man pin anything that he can
tie with string. You will have
much trouble making some men
believe that they couldn't tie q
button-hole into a wristband with a
piece of twine.-HdacEeye. eas
Daniel O'Connell once made n
speech in which he reconnted that in
Dublin there were within six years
twenty thousand less births than
formerly. Then he exclaimed: 81
charge the British Government with
the murder of those twenty thous
and infants who never were born"
As the chemicals used in dyeing
silks are said to produce spontaneous
combustion, and several fires at sea
have been caused by them, ship cap
tains are asking what to do about it.
We would respectfully suggest that
they have plenty of fancy hose on
board.-Nep Orleans Picayune.
Whenever you see a nobby girl
In an awful nice silk dress,
A sailing down the avenue
Looking too sweet to bless;
You can't most always sometimes tell,
OHiCos Ou uGppOu W huOW uCE3
But that her tired old mother
Is home scrubbing the floor
LAMBERT LAMProN.
The Western lady who read in a
newspaper that baking powder was
good thing, hought she'd bake
some, and the old man, on arriving
where the cabin had stood, said he
wouldn't mind the affair so much, if
she'd let the dog out before blowing
herself and the property to glory in
that style.-Bostoa Post.
The wife of defeated candidate
for office in this State, the day after
the election presented her husband
with triplets. He did not arrive at
home until the next day, when he
was shown his offspring, one at a
time, until all three had been exhib-
tied, when, looking quizzingly down
at his wife, he asked: "Are the re-
turns all in, M'riahF'
The happiest point in maiden's life,
That is higher priced than wealth or
fame,
Is when the happy day arrives
That necessitates change of name.
~ --DdnielsOaUilIe lSeatinel.
This may be true of the maid, but wives
FOO often find that the married state
Is happiest when the day arrives
That necessitates change OF mate.
-Iadiaadpolis Herald.