The Osceola times., 1880-07-10
WAYS OF THE WORLD.


ween politics and literature.
A NEW YORK dramatic critic can
change his opinion of play in just
thirty seconds by the watch.
81 pEss." said little sis yesterday. "If
bod was here now he'd make lot o.
folks. 'Tis awful dusty to-day"
AN English firm sold 5000 fire-proot
safes in Turkey before il was asceytained
that the filling was only sawdust.
STRAWBERRIES are sold by the measure
and cherries by the weight, chiefly be-
cause cherries have stones in them.
People who have acquired the habit
of visiting dentist would probably do
30 if they had not tooth in their
heads.
In Norway there is a church which is
built Of paper, but in the United States
there are many which are built on
paper.
NINE. DE NOE, the widow of Cham,
the French caricaturist, has become in
sane, and has been placed in lunahc
asylum.
1T is said there are now 100000 Chris.
tians in China. II they are real Chris
tians China compares tavorably with this
country.
The laws of the prize ring make it inn
portant that when bruiser makes a
motion for a new trial he should come
up smiling.
IT is believed that Mr. Bradlaugh is
the first ex-private in the British army
since Cobbett's time who has sat in
Parliament.
A BOLT of lightning killed eleven hogs
in Virginia, and never even shockcd
three men who were near by playing
cards for the ownership of blind mule
A MAN who won't stand up and veil
and swing his hat when gang OF $50
horses are coming down the homestretch
in bunch must be veneered with sheet
iron.
GENERALLY speaking, married man
is considered more worthy of credit than
bachelor, because unmarried men are
generally restless and often fall into bad
habits.
Count DEMKrRIUs E. BerAssI, Consul
General of Greece in New York, has
obtained three months leave ofabsence
from his Government and will 40 to
Europe.
IT is rumored that Princess Marie o
Hanover, sister of Princess Frederika,
will follow the latters example and
marry a commoner, Lieutenant Colonel
Vogeler.
BILLY FLORENCE claims to be the in
ventor of the trick of throwing bouquet
tl..a 10, l. t,., IL ~.
He never picks one up without first
stepping in it.
SARA BERNHARDT has given her ser.
want orders not TO answer the door bell
And now it makes no difference to Bern.
hardt whether "the bell goes-a- ringing
for Sara" or not.
OLIVE LOGAN says: paris is the wick
eldest city on the face OF the earth
Directly after that she says: sit is @
lovely place to visit either for week, OF
a twelve-month.
IT is said that Senator Edmumds
makes sharp distinction between pub
lie and private business, and will not
not answer a call TO the lobby during a
session of the Senate.
A ScoTCHMAN asked an Irishman
"Why were half farthings coined in
England?' Pats answer was, "To give
Scotchmen an opertunity to subscribe &c
charitable institutions
A BRIDE of month went to married
lady of quarter of year and said
"Ny darling says that women are fools.
"Never mind" said the other, "wait un
til he reaches ad)ectives."
A CITIZEN of Plymouth, Ind, fired six
shots at a supposed burglar and ther
his wife called out: "See here, Sam, il
you don't stop shooting at me you'll have
the house full Of neighbors"
In Holland, Mich, when dog howl.
before house it portends funeral un
less he is speedily shot If it is the
Mayors dog all signs are declared of
as the canine is valued at $50.
PRocroR says the ocean contains about
100000 tons of water. This tallie:
with our figures the last time we weighed
ii, but there have been several rains
since.-Binghamton Republican.
This is sad commentary on our
boasted civilization" tramp despon.
IDENTIFY observed, when he discovered
sthat the ham he had taken from the
front door OF a shop was wooden one.
"MARIA Maria! please let me in" said
man to his wife, who was looking out
of the window, watching him trying to
open the door with a toothpick. ''Ish
tread on my key and it's all fattened
out.
A MICHIGAN negro, named Adams. is
raking in IS bills from his African
friends in Canada as reward for in
initiating them into the secrets of ma
sonry. He has them pinch their noses
as grand hailing sign.
"A HEN at Bangor has adopted litter
Of ysung Kittens" says the Rockland
Courier. When the kitten chickens do
not come to the scratch the foster
mother sets down on them, though she
must go fur for feathers.
MANS leg, with a stocking on, was
found in the ChicagC Ever the other
morning. The only thing that seemed
to cause any wonder on the part of the
bystanders was that the parties who
murdered the man didn't take the
stocking.
VICToR HuGo's daughter, Jeanne, has
been presented by Professor Nordensk-
jold with paper-knife made from the
tooth of walrus, on one side of which
is inscribed ~. H." and on the other
From the expedition ofthe Vega to the
Polar Sea-"
WHEN Mark Twain sends one of his
sketches TO Hartford paper, and every
body in the shop alters and amends, and
writes in and scratches out, and i'm
proves the whole, Twain is hopping