Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1880-09-17

THAT PROMISES TO END WELL.

THAT PROMISES TO END WILL.
For more than a week past the Rev. |
Aminidab Bledso has been very much
troubled in his mind. A rival Galveston
pastor in his immediate neighborhood
has been carrying on such a successful
revival that nobody in the neighborhood
has slept for more than three hours Just
before day during the past week. A
number of tenants in the neighborhood
refuseto pay rent, and some have actually
moved away. All this time not the
slightest religious interest has been
manifested anon Rev. Bledso's congre-
cation. On the contrary, quite a num-
her of them have strayed off to parson
Johnsing's revival. Something had to
be done, or Othello's occupation would
be gone up the spout. In vain did par
son Bledso warn his flock of the wrath
to come if they strayed into Johnsing's
sheep-fold, but all efforts to bring them
to a sense of their duty failed. He had
quite a serious notion to resorting to the
Arkansas plan of salvation, which Is to
take a club and lay on to the sinners
until they crawled up to the mourner's
bench with some of their ribs caved in,
but as some of the members of the con-
gregation who handle cotton were liable
to lay him out on the mourner's bench,
he hesitated about resorting to extreme
measures. Last Sunday night there was
quite a large congregation at parson
Bledso's chapel in consequence of parson
Johnsing being laid up with sore
throat, and the former determined to
profit by the occasion. After the hymn
was sung parson Bledso stepped to the
front and said:
"Brederin and cistern Dis heah church
is gwine to be a scene of de outpourin' of
de hebbenly grace, and I'll start de boom
wild Jim Webster, as sorter nest-egg
fooh de res OBJ you to lay up to. James,
take yer place on dat mourner's bench.
Jim Webster, dandified looking
young mulatto, said he wasn't well, and
begged TO be excused.
"All right, Brudder Webster, if you
feel like dar was no hope for yer--dat
dar was no balm in Goliad for a sinner
like yer, jess stay whar yer is, and suck
de end OBJ yer little cane. When your
belubbed pasture is called on by de
foahman of de Galveston grand jury to
say if he knows who shaved de tail of
squire Jones bay boss, he is gwine to
pint out de niggah, even if it was his
brudder."
1t wasn't two seconds before Jim
Webster was at the mourners' bench.
"Annudder brand plucked from de
burnin' brimstone; one noah lost lam
foun' for de angels to rejoice ober noah
den de ninety an what amt been cotch-
ed yit. Now is de time. Let's sing Ole
Hundred"
After the singing, parson Bledso went
on to exhort "Why don't you git
aboard de gospel trainP Now Is de ac-
cepted time. Which is best, to make
your peace wild hebben, to hab dat peace
what passes all understandin', or to be
sent to de penitentiary for votin' foah
times at de last election9 Wud you
rudder be follower of de Lam, or hab
a white man follerin' you wild a gun,
while yer was working sixteen hours a
day whar. dar is weepin' and whalin' wild
a big ledder strap"
"I'se comm" said tricky looking
darby, who is supposed to have con-
siderable influence in political circles,
going up and taking his place alongside
of the first penitent.
Praise de Lor'! De gran jury is
gwine to meet and den dat culled lady
what forgot to bring de wash back Is
gwine to call on all de mountains to
kiver her up. Wud yer rudder be one
OBJ de elect, or hab hoe ia yer paw
working on de streetsP Come up, sister,
and jide de gospel band"
Several responded to the invitation.
"Brudderen, dis is slow work. Let all
dem what's been keerless in handlin'
poultry, dem what's sinned agin dar
nabor's wood-pile, come up, or dar will
be some telephonin' to de police station.
So long de lamp no oil do lack,
De'durndest rascal may come back"
II is needless to say that the revival Is
an immense success. Galveston NeWs.