Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1880-01-16
Death in the Lime-Kiln Club.


There was sadness in every eye as
the members of the Club softly fled in
and took their seats. Each one had
seen the Grape on the hall door, and
each one had been told that death had
again invaded Paradise Hail.
"Gem'len," began the President, as
he rose up and looked down the hall at
the vacant seat bedecked with Grape,
"it am my painful dooty to inform you
dat BrHdder Torpedo Hunt am no more
on dis earth. He passed away las night
arter an illness of only free days. Tor
pedo was our brudder, an an airnest
worker in de cause" continued the
President; "but, if STAN heah to yulo-
gize him, mus not forgit dat he had
his faults. If de troof can't hurt de
livin', it can't harm de dead. Torpedo
was great ham to git up airly in de
mawnin', an to work hard all day, but
his chill en- went bar foot all winter jist
de same. He was kind to his wife, and
felt bad for de poo, but he never played
yuker widout hevin' two extra bowers
up his sleeve. He didn't git drunk, but
no rail fence had any bizness widin a
mile of his cabin in winter. He didn't
ingaige in rows an riots, but his ene-
mics got hit wild brick-bats all de same.
We saw him at church on Sunday, set
tin good 'zample fur de young, but
he'd turn in next day and try to win de
big prize in q lottery. 1t was about
haf-an-haf wild him. When we say dat
of any man we hev hit him pretty clus.
When we hev given de dead all de
praise dey sought to gain when livin',
no mans mem'ry kin ask fur more.
Torpedo was up to the average, an he
am dead.n
Col. Damson Brown took the floor,
and said life was short and uncertain,
and it behooved every man to have his
house in order. He wanted to make a
confession and clear his conscience.
Six years ago he poisoned a dog be-
longing to Esquire Smith, of Hastings
street, neighbor of his. Both were
now members of the Club, and in the
presence of all he would confess, ask
forgiveness, and pay what the canine
was worth.
There was great clapping of hands
as he sat down. Then Esquire Smith
arose, his face wreathed in smiles, and
he replied that he distinctly remenl.
bered the dog case, but that the Colonel
didn't owe him anything. The dog
hadn't been dead six hours when he
killed and ate the Coloners goat, and
stole half a cord of his wood, and he
thought the thing was about even.
Samuel Shin got on his feet. He felt
contrite and broken up, and he also had
something to confess. About three
months ago he found dollar bill in
the hall. He knew it must have been
lost by some member, and yet his sci.
fishness and dishonesty whispered to
him to keep it. He did so; but now the
owner of the bill had only 70 reveal his
identity, and his money should be re.
stored and his forgiveness asked.
Brother Gardner crooked his finger
for that William" Sir Isaac Wal.
pole leaned forward and held out his
hand. Waydown Bebee and twenty
nine others took the floor in chorus, and
tried to say that they would receive
back their lost bill and grant free
pardon. A rapid look over the hall
| and count of noses showed forty-seven
men who had lost dollar and were
ready to forgive Samuel Shin. He was
called forward by the President, who
asked:
Did any of us gem'len drop dollar
bill on this flo p''
"We didr' called forty-seven voices
together.
az resign my claim!" sighed Brother
Gardner as he looked up and down and
realized the situation.
"Was it a greenback that you
lostedP" asked SamuelP'
Forty-seven echoes wildly answered
"Yesr'
Dis was Kennedy bill found,'
softly continued Samuel, and amid an
awful silence he returned to his bench.
A committee of three men was then
appointed to draft an inscription fol
the tombstone of the deceased, and the
meeting adjourned.-Free Press.