The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1880-04-10
VARIETIES.
-Georgiaps are planting corn.
bonnets are in bloom.

IL oOlfo lnc puzzle, Hnu une square
route.
The incest parlor cara sofa that
Just holds two.
Acorn on the tree is worth two on
the toe.
The spring whitewashing business is
brushing up little.
The number of families living in New
York City is 21S,467.
"A little learning is a dangerous
thing This applies to violin playing.
AN eleven-year-old highwayman was
arrested in New York the other day.
The possession Of money, ike medi-
cine, eases payin' -SteubenvilIe TO-
Herald.
]. No wonder the March hair is mad
it gets blown about So Cincinnati COM
naercial
The apple tree is very tenacious of
life; many are known to bear fruit at the
age of two hundred years.
"A ladies' leap year club has resolved
that "breeches of promise are cut by
us. "-Nor7IStoeOm Herald.
The Boston Gazette recommends a
eanary hung in the bedroom window
as an excellent eye-opener in the morn
Z "A negro, after gazing at some Chi
nese, shook his head and solemnly said:
-" If de white folks be so dark as dat out
dar | wonder what's de color of de black
folks?''
The young man who wants to get
up with the sun must not sit up too late
with the daughter. Middletoa0n Tran
script.
Brigham Young's widow is gradual
ly forgetting the oldma -Four of them
have remarked since he died.-FTee
Press.
The man with shabby overcoat is
the first to complain of the heat of the
Notwithstanding sun.-Boston Ira7a-
script.
Wives of great men all remind us
We may make our wives sublime,
BY the purchase of spring bonnets,
If we purchase them in time.
Now that our best young men have
hung up their ulsters for the summer,
an opportunity is given to note the re-
markable effect of a mild winter on the
growth of legs.-NeV HaUera Register.
-Parson Jones says: cit generally
happens, when | have prepared par
ticularly good sermon, my congregation
will be very small, and large when
have poor one" q have been told
that the house is always full when you
PREACH" was the somewhat equivocal
compliment of supplemented Smith.
Mrs. Sackett, of townsville, Della
ware County, slammed her door to and
gun standing behind it fell to the floor,
discharging its contents into her leg and
making wound which necessitated am
putation. Moral: Always shut door
softly, as though there was sickness in
the family.
The Binghampton Republican has
discovered that the separate blocks in
the " 15-block'' puzzle may be placed in
| ,207, 674, 1863, 900 positions, at each time
leaving the required space of one. AS it
lakes about the same number of years to
do it, we shall not try. We haven't so
many years to spare, and cannot mag
inc how the editor of the Republican
stole so much time from his other duties.
-NOrYiSt0eJn Herald.
"A certain painter was Dragging of
his wonderful command of color to
friend one day. His friend did not seem
to take it quite all in. "Why," eX-
claimed the painter, "do you know there
are but three painters in the world, sir,
who understand color?h "And who are
they?" at last asked the friend. 'Why,
sir, am one, and-and- and-I forget
the name of the other twon'
"A little Philadelphia girl, eight years
old, recently lost her life, perhaps
through her own heroic self-control. She
was holding baby ON her lap when her
clothing caught fire. She succeeded in
placing the baby, uninjured, in its
cradle, and then ran into the street to
save the house from being burned down.
Her own injuries were so severe that she
died.
Here is a description of one of the
female school directors just elected at
Middletown, Orange County, N. Y;
Mrs. DR.. Lydia Sayer Hasbrouck is
full six feet in height, and built in pro-
portion, with strong masculine features,
elastic in step, and quick in physical ac-
ton; she would command attention any
where, even if it were not for the bloom
er costume, to which she has rigidly adj
hered for over a quarter of a century,"
When a man in a Vermont grocery
store was sitting upon the edge of the
counter, and his feet slipped and he
raked the whole length of his back on
the counters edge and sat square down
in bushel basket of eggs which stood
right where he couldn't miss it, the
grocer was Mortified, and eXclaimed:
"Was it an accidentP' and the victim
replied: BY crimus, sir, if you insinuate
that skun my back and got myself into
this mess on purpose, I'll jam your head
into the remains of those eggs!'
"A magician at Leadville had dag
GER, the blade of which being struck
against anything, would slip into the
handle of the weapon while a needle
would fly out and prick the thing struck,
and when he iamned it against the breast
of Leadvillian who attacked him and
the fellow felt the needle, he thought he
was stabbed to the heart and tainted,
and after four doctors had failed
to make him recover, it was found nee
essaly to leave him alone with another
| NE whisky iuo in ot,da,. IL, bi,ino. him,