The Orangeburg democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1879-1881, 1880-12-03
Shameless Shams .

militia Generals" corner.grocery
sJldges" and town council "Honora
Lies as ridiculous as our spittoons
and our dollar.aristocracy. But he,
fare Tie title nuisance could be quite
lgnghed out Of existence, the war
transform ed all our people into soldi.
ers. We know from the official re.
cords that q million Of high privates
enlisted on both sides during The war
but the slaughter was terrible, and
not single private soldier escaped
alive. All the survivors are officers,
IN dalthough, perhaps, few Of them
could show their commissions, they
take every possible opportunity of air
ing the r rank.
s5ln aristocratic counties the titles
are hereditary; but in this country
are infectious. Abroad the son OF a
lord becomse his lordship when his
father dies; but in this free republic
one title generates another as fast as
flies in the sun. When the head of
family becomes a Judge ora General
all the boys are dubbed Colonels or
Majors Or Commodores, SO as to keep
up with the old gentleman, whose
brothers and brothers-in-law straight
way confer upon themselves titles OF
honor OF, distinction in order that the
original Judge or General may not
eclipse them by the brilliancy Of his
prefix. Thus it happens that this
democratic republic is now inhabited
almost exclusively by men of title.
.sG enerals," ",sColouels" and "Majors"
:sse as plentiful rs cranberries, and
everybody out of jail-and ma
jSrity inside-is considered an
S5Hon.'
& The proposition that only those
Who have earned their titles should
them.is selfseyident; but while
15 tniiY oisrover real scidiers conleis
ted 10 be plain "Mr." now that they
are mustered out Of service, we see
thousands of men, who arc citizens in
war and soldiers in peace, slrutling
about with military handles 10 their
names. These soda water .:Colonels,"
all fizz and cork manage our theatres,
direct our operas and run our circus.
es. England sends us u militia
''Coloncl' TO give us lillian operas,
and we reciprocate with an American
''Colonel" OF negro mimslrels. Mill
tary officers are the landlords Of our
hotels; "Major" mixes our drinks
behind the bar and u esquire" attends
to the boot backing dcpa,tmcn
All the editors who are not "Colo-
ncls" are lions" To some Amcri-
cans you may be bold enough TO deny
n preliminary title, but to address
anybody letter without the ailix of
ESD" would, regarded as Il personal
insulL-thc smaller the social position
Of the person addressed the create,
The insult Of course. Thus titles
which, honestly won and honcsLl,
%0Tn, would do equal honor to those
who bear and those who respect them,
are cheapencd by bogus inita .ions
and become ludicrous instead of dis
tinguislcd. AS regular u!!cers arc
most anxious to get out Of uniform
anu into multi as aeon us they arc of
duty, so those who have n right to ii.
ties are beginning To discard them
while the bogus bearers flourish moro
and more obllusivcly, like the raw
militia captain on his first training
day.
We observe, also, an,organizcd sys
tenn of scli:promotion among thcs,
sham aristocrals. One parsonage
whose card bore the proud but modes
title Of Major five years ago, has jus
returned from Europe ful! Colonel
although lie has never seen scrvic,
since Bull Run. With steady deyo