, 1880-07-11
LOCAL ITEMS.

Do not grunble ABOUT the weather. BE
thankful that you are still in the world where
the thermometer seldom gets above LOO.
An advertisement says: Save your hair
while you have it. Many young ladies obey
this advice. They take their hair off before
going to bed, and carefully place it on the
bureau or back Of a chair, where the rats
can't get at it. At least, runlor says they do.
Chicago leads the world in everything but
excursion steamboat accidents. When will
SHE be able to boast Of her preEminence in
this direction?
The Ladies' Grain & Provision Exchange
continues to be the headquarters for ladies
| who, having business tact and nerve, venture
q lew dollars upon the many chances of
making hundreds and thousands. The Ex-
i change has been highly successful since the
inau EuratiOn Of its business career, and
promises to become still m0re useful and
popular in the future The rooms Of the
Exchange are in the Metropolitan Block,
and have all the convenienccs necessary to
facilitate business transactions. Ladies who
desire an easy and rapid mode Of making
money should hot fail to drop i'll at the Ex-
change during their leisure hours.
Well-regulated hotels now set special ta-
bles fur the accommodation OF guests who
| prefer to put knives down their throats while
| eating. To prevent accidents, the knives are
to b. attached to the tables by s1uall chains.
Professional sword-swalloWers,, however,
| will be allowed to handle the tableware III
their own way.
4 grand excursion will leave Chicago for
Ashland and Lake Superior on July -. Fare
for the round trip only SIS. For particulars
inquire of G. E. Rollins, 16l La Sale street,
Chicago.
An English doctor says that no human be-
ing will eat lettuce unless he has some faint
trace of the hog III his nature. We would
like to stick pin into this fellow. Trace Of
the hog, indeed The doctor probably goes
the entire aninal, and puts too much onion
into his salad.
1t,lpromptu poems will be received at this
office during the heated term and given
special positions.
Contracts for John II. ,Snlyth Block. on
street, were let by .Egan S Hill last week.
O'Iszien Bios, 3G7 State street, furnish the
pla1e-glass and do the painting.
lie came into our sanctum with large roll
Of manuscript under lis arm, and said very
politely: IL have a trife here about the
beautiful sunset yesterday, which was
dashed off by friend Of mine, which I
would like inserted if you. have room"
"rlgnty OF room. Justinsert it yourself" re-
basket toward him.
It is said that the secret of the large amount
Of business transacted by Justice Summer
field at his office, No. al. Adans street. is
found in the dispatch and the order c8forccd,
as we'll as the prompt payment to sultOrS
Of tic judgments collected ut his court
The Boston Globe says it is !: sign Of good
breeding to find fault with everything OH the
table at your boardiny-llouse Thanks for
this information. We couldn't understand
why the distinguished boartters who sit Mt our
tablo find SO much fault with everything.
The grocery and. meat market of ID. G.
13art!0n Il Bro, corner Wabash avenue and
Harrison street, is said to be the cheapest
tirst-class house in the city.
..My daughter, never tell any one your
private atfalIs,' said a mother IN sending her
"Monsicur, thirtl-class ticket, if You
plsasc,' said the daughter mt the ticket-oflice:
For whereas asked the employe. " Is that
any Of your buslness?" answered made
moiSelle, Indignantly, remembering her
mothers advice.
Il you have Il good watch which needs care
fnl treatment it will be absolutely certain to
receive it at Matsou's.
Hiss Ellen Cu.nmins complains Of the lack
Of courtesy shown her On Eler visit TO Mar
shall, Tex, where size went to give her testi-
n9ny IN the Carris murder De-, trla n MisS Cum
tilnony intended to convict, llish-toned
Texan of murder? She ought to be grateful
that she was not Observation-Disclosures
Journal.
The most lifelike photographs in the city
aC testers S, VI state street, IEe coolest rooms
in the city.
The Detroit Free Press says that the United
States army chews up half Il million pounds
of tobacco and two Indians every year.
a census taker discovered one woman who
don't know what. her husband does It is
safe to wager. however, that he didn't find
know what time her husband comes home o.
nights. /:
Tourists, before leaving the city, supply
yourselves with stationery from the superb
stock of DunWen &: Ford. 50 Madison street.
"A fashionable London diner-out will
average three dinners a week." says the