The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1880-07-15
"wHAr ARE WE TO DOT"
From Grants Organ, the Le-
mara, Iowa, sentinel, Rep.

From CRAMPS Organ. tine Lee
mara, Iowa, sentinel, Rep.
HO therel some of you teachers of
political gymnastics, this way q min
ute-give us Lesson.
Remember, We have been running
for twenty years on the high-Pressure
God-snd-mOrality plan, under a full
head of double refined patriotic steam,
and
That our party is the party Of
statesmen, principle and purity.
And could never steal or tell a lie.
We offered you Grant, you have
given us Garfield.
Now what in thunder are we ex>
pected TO do in this Garfield cans
paign.
That's what pothers US.
Eight years ago there was a tre-
mendous row about Credit Mobilier-
ism.
1t was an awful thing that c. NJ.
Il was whispered pretty loud that
some Of our boys, our big fellows, our
leading men, our Christian statesmen
had been-stealing.
And our republican congress or
dered a republican committee 10 in
vestigate the thing, and old Judge
Poland, of Vermont, an old-fashioned
perpendicular republican, was made
chairman of the committee.
The Judge called the roll Of chris
tian statesmen, beginning with Schay-
Ter Colfax, vice>President of Ameri>
ca, and war-horse in whom there
was no guile, till he came to James A.
Garfield, of Ohio, asking all sorts of
questions as to whether they had ever
received rs q gratuity or otherwise,
or were in any way interested in Cred
it Mobilier or Union Pacific Stock,
and they all kind o'blushed and said,
No.
When Jim said No. the old Judge
looked him square in the eye and re-
peated, "What, neveri"
Pinafore had not got around then,
so that instead of answering in the
short operate style Of to day, Jim
having first solemnly invoked the eter-
nal God to bear him witness, replied:
81 never owned, received or agreed
10 receive any stock of the Credit Mo-
bilier or of the Union Pacific Railroad
nor any dividends or profits arising
from either of them"
Now that is about as plump as it
could be made, but it didn't satisfy
Judge Poland's committee, and they
kept nosing around till they, having
first been sworn on the Holy Evan
gels to tell the truth, the whole truth
and nothing but the truth, reported
10 Congress these Words
"The facts in regard to Mr.. Gar
fed, as found by the committee, are
indentical with the case of Mr.. Kelly
TO the point of reception of the check
of 1929. He agreed with Mr.. Ames
to take ten shares Of Credit Mobilier
stock, but did not pay for the same.
Mr.. Ames received the so per cent.
dividends in bonds, and sold them for
81 per cent. and also received 90 per
cent. cash dividend, which, together,
paid the price of stock and interest,
and left q balance of 1929. This
sum was paid over to Mr.. Garfield by
check on the sergeant-at.arms, and
Mr.. Garfield then understood this
sum was the balance on di7idend after
paying for the stock"
And the republican Congress &C.
cepted the report of the Republican
committee as presented by its repub-
lican chairman Judge Poland, of Yer
mont.
What will we do or say when the
unprincipled democrats refer to that
episode in Jim's life?
We would like to know.
Shall we tell 'em, this was a little
family affair among ourselves, that
we've fixed it all up, and it is 10 darn
outsider DuSlnesssanYnOW!
How would that dof
Or shall we touch the sympathetic,
and tell them how Jim was a poor lit.
lie orphan, and went to Sunday
school, and then drove mules on the
tow-puth of canal in Ohio, and then
he went to be a school master ana had
only one pair of breeches, and had to
lie abed while they were being meE-
ded, and that he is the typical Amer
ican."
Wouldn't that be pretty good
That ought to fetch the grangers,
sure.
But we do not profess to know
what would be the best course to take
for yeu know We Unjust stand by
the ticket"
And We want to get in our best |
ticks on them corrupt democrats.
p. S.-wouldn't it be a good idea |
TO say that Judge Poland was an in. !
fernal old liar, and that his committee
were Internal old liars, and that con-
gress was nothing but pack OF infer
nal old liars.
How would that do?