The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-23

How IEe Hurried Up "a Late Passenger
for an Early Train.

How IEe Hurried UP a Late Passenger
for an Early Train.
A good story is told at the expense of
the proprietor of one of the leading Chi
cago hotels during the war. AT that
time the railroads were doing an enor-
nous business, and passenger trains left
the city as early AZ o'clock in the
morning. For the accommodation of
those who wanted to go out on these
trains the hotels got up what was called
a railroad breakfast before the regu-
lar meal.
The proprietor in question was accus-
toned to rise at half-past 4, to "rattle
up the sleeping servants, and see that
the guests who departed ON the early
trains were properly attended to, scoop
III the bills, and get them started.
One morning, on coming down to the
office as usual, he found among others
on the call-list, Room g." to be called
for the 5:45 Michigan Central train.
Accordingly, about quarter to 5, he
sent up bell-boy to awaken the occu-
pant of the room. After waiting a little
while and finding that the man did not
come he sent the boy up again, but with
no better success.
In the meantime he got after the cook
with SHARP stick" and had every
thing ready and red-hot. Seeing that it
lacked but few minutes of train-time,
and he must get his man started or he
would be left, mine host told another
bell-boy to run and wake the fellow up
at all hazards and tell him breakfast was
ready. The cry of breakfast quickly
aroused the troublesome sleeper, and in
a minute he came tearing down stairs,
buttoning his clothes as he ran. The
minute he reached the office, the land
lord grabbed him and rushed him into
the dining-room, and told him he hadn't
but few minutes TO eat and get out,
and to go to work quick His breakfast
was slammed down on the table beef
steak, quail, potatoes, buckwheat cakes,
coffee, ETC., all just off the fire and
smoking hot
SEQ to work Go to work p cried
the landlord. "You've only few min
utes to spare"
"Oh, everything's SO hot, and the cof-
fee is boiling y expostulated the guest,
who was q countryman.
"Oh, go to work Pitch in Cob
bic it down I'll put the sugar in your
coffee and butter your cakes. Hurry
up Hurry up The time is going
fast y retorted the landlord, and he
dumped the milk and sugar into the
steaming coffee, and buttered a man.
moth pile of cakes, and poured singeing
hot sirup over them, all the time en-
couraging his man on with "Pile in !!
Put in your best ticks! The time is
most up!' etc. The man ate like an
OK; meat, quail, potatoes and coffee
went like st. Julien he poured down
the steaming coffee and piled in the
cakes two stories high, while his eyes
stuck out like dOor-knobs, and the
sweat ran off his face and hands and
down his shirt like the eruption of Mount
Vesuvius.
With his last bite the landlord grabbed
him again, rammed him through the
door and into the Office, jammed his hat
on his head, told him how much his
bill was, so that he could be getting out
his money, had the bell-boys bring out
his valise, and, with Precipitation and
fear bursting from every pore in the
poor fellows body, told him to spread
himself full size, and asked him if he
had had his baggage checked, as it was
only five minutes before the train
started.
Wha-what train ?" calculated the
man.
"Why the 5:45 train You're going
out on the 5:45 Michigan Central, ain t
you?'
"No," said he, 81 wasn't going out
for week"
All the bell-boys and other servants
who were gathered around to help get
the man started began to smoker and
run out doors the doors slammed, and
the proprietor himself could not help
bursting right out laughing. Turning
to the terrified and indignant traveller,
he said:
"Well, what in the world did you
think was doing when was rushing
you through SOP"
"Gol don it / never was in one OF
these big taverns before, and 1 didn't
know but that was the way they did it y
"Oh, WE'LL" said the landlord, when
he recovered from his paroxysm OF
laughter, "you needn't pay your bill,
then; you're all right.
But the victim heard the boys roaring
outside the doors, and, realizing what q
martyr he had been, he got on his eal
and said he guessed he'd pay; he
wouldn't stay in the house another day
now, anyhow And SO he and his bag.
gage did get started after all.
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