Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1880-11-26


will be President, and English or
Arthur Vice President? Say it over
until you can remember it. The
tickets are Hancock and English
and Garfield and Arthur. Compre-
hend that"
Why, certainly. I saw those
names on the banners. remember
it now. Which will be elected %
"That's the question:" rejoined
Mr.. SpoopendyAe, sarcastically eff
Mr.. English can carry his own State
of Indiana, he has an excellent
show"
"What will Mr.. Hancock and Mr..
Arthur carry ?" asked Mrs. Spoopen-
dyke, with an air of absorbing inter
est.
Garry" howled Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, they'll carry swill to the
pigs, and that's more'n you know
how to do. What dye 'spose they
will carry?'
- suppose Mr.. Arthur will carry
Mr.. English's State, won't he, and
his own? And Mr.. Hancock will
carry Mr.. Garfield's State and Gov
ernor's Ireland. Amt that whero
he lives? l don't see what they
want of each others States. They
ought"
"Oh! you've got it!' shrieked Mr..
Spoopendyke. You've got it
boiled down. You only need a
heavy rain and the side door of a
bar-room to DO an election day.
What You want is lot of blots aud
your name spelled wrong to be a
poll-list. Don't tell We that two of
'em are running against the other
two, and the two that get the most
! States will be elected? And if
man can't carry his own State he's
liable to be licked? Can't We under
stand that?"
:" I see; 1 see," said Mrs. Spoop-
endyke. It's rs plain as day now.
But suppose they all carry their own
States, won't it be funny?"
He, he gigglod Mr.. Spoopen-
dyke, with horrible grimaces. "It'll
be the funniest thing ever known.
If they do that, you just dramatize
! it, It'll beat nine circuses in row.
How's each going to carry his own
State? Think he's going to turn it
up on one end and roll it like
hoop"
q don't know" said Mrs. Spoop-
endyke rejecting. 81 don't exact
ly understand how they do it, but
they ought to know what they're
going to do before they accept the
convention. l read"
Who cares a dog gasted cent
what ye read,' peeled forth Mr..
Spoopendyke. You don't know
enough about politics to stuff a chick.
ell. Who said anything about any
ueasley convention ? Git into bed,
will ye? You gct an idea that you
put candidates in pot like turnips
and poke 'em with a fork, and the
one that's done first Is elected. Oh!
you're rieht-.-youvo got the sense
of it. With your craftsmanship, all
YOU want is four amendments and q
motion to adjourn, to be an act of
Congress-, and Mr.. Spoopendyke
cast his clothing into a corner, flop
ped into bed and pulled the clothes
over his ears.
q don't care" mused Mrs.
Spoopendyke, rs she turned out the
gas and then began pattcring around
to see if everything was all right
Il know that if Mr.. Garfield carries
Mr. EngIish's State, and Mr.. Eng
lish carries Mr.. Gartield's State, it
will go lard with Hancock and Ar
thur, and Mr.. Arthur is such hand
some man. and Mrs. Spoopendyke
sidled into bed, planted her cold
feet in the pit of Mr.. Spoopendyl:e' S
stomach and went to sleep, dream
ing that that worthy was running for
the Office of notary public and had
carried every State in the Union in-
clu ling " Governors Ireland
Commander Cheyne, r. N, we'll
known as the leading spirit in the
projected balloon exploration OF
the polar regions, expressing him
self as convinced that the failure of
Sir John Franklir's expedition was
due to starvation, brought about by
the fraud of q contractor in supply.
ing the party with preserved meats
which could not be eaten. He cites
several instances in which the meats
put up by this contractor have been
found TO be simply preserved filth,
totally unfit for food, more than five
: tons having been thrown overheard
on one occasion from n vessel in the
Arctic seas.
j. Landerer has stated to the
, French Academy reas ons for believ
. ing that the materials of the moons