davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune., 1880-02-18
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New-York tribune., 1880-02-18

The following shows the cxports Exclusive OF
specie) from the port of New-York for the week
ending February II and since the beginning OF the
year. as compared with the corresponding periods
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18
The Art Of Not Hearing.

When the telephone was first introduced,
The newspaper funny man did not fail to
remark that Mr.. Edison was on the wrong
tack; what people needed was not a
machine enabling them to hear things far
oil, but something that would help them
not to hear things near by. The saying had
more sense IN 1t than its source would lead
one to expect. Who has not sighed, when
pestered during busy hour by some bore.
Tor machine that would make him oblvi.
Gus to the rattle of his tormentor's tongue ?
But though no machine has yet been in
vented Tor this purpose, the art of not hear
ing may be cultivated to an almost unhmi.
TED extent. So many things are said which
are coarse, abusive, profane-so many
others rasp the temper-that the better
way Is to cultivate one deaf ear, and turn
that to all such things. The power of the
will in this respect is astonishing. Another
good effect of having a judiciously deaf ear
Is that when people find you do not hear
what they say, they soon become tired of
talking. Many quarrel would be saved if
the one to whom hasty, cross word is
spoken did not hear it. Some things are
better ignored than noticed. The art of
not seeing is as valuable as that Of not hear
ing and both should be taught and practsed
in every well-regulatod family. Its a great
thing in teacher or parent, or in anybody
who has to do with children, to know when
not to see and hear things. Breaches Of
discipline are sometimes venial, and wise
man sometimes will not observe that there
has been any breach
Some people possess these arts to perfec
ton. A wellbred man or woman never
hears vulgar Or ill-natured remark. even
when made to him personally, unless it is
so made that he cannot avoid noticing it.
What happy gift it would be if every pas
tor could be endowed with this faculty
People then would not talk scandal to him,
knowing that he never heard anything of
the sort. They would spare him those i'll
natured criticisms that now occasionally
vex his soul, and that fattery which is
more pleasant but also more dangerous.
Our advice is, Cultivate the art of not hear.
ing things. 1t is a more valuable thing
than the cultivated ear " on which SO
many pride themselves.-N. T. Eram.incr.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

before you went down stairs" said he. al
leave to night"
"Indeed? Where are you going?" asked
Laura.
go, don't know" was the savage re.
"You can take note to George for me?"
eyes, if you get it ready" said he.
"Very we'll. | will write it now"
Laura left the room, and LennoX stood
moodily at the winkow. Presently Mamie
came in and stood near him.
care you really going away ?" she asked.
yes | am" was the short answer.
And won't you tell us where?"
al don't know myself-neither know
nor carel" he growled.
She slipped her hand in his arm with the
old caressing movement he remembered so
well, and spoke gently, using his name for
the first time since he came.
But, Lennox, dear, if you go away off
somewhere, what shall | do?"
lie turned suddenly and caught her to
his heart.
80 Mamie |" he cried passlonately, "if
you would only come back to me-if | could
recover my lost treasure, would not go
anywhere o, my lost love, is it too late p
She laid her face down against his shoul.
der, and asked:
Lennox, dear, tell me which you love
best, the Mamie you used to know or the
fashionable young lady you found here?"
go, Mamie, darlingW he cried, clasping
her closer. 81 wouldn't give one toss of
your old brown curls for all the fashionable
young ladies in tho world"
"Then you will have to take your old
Mamie back again, Lennox, dear"
And Lennox, passionately clasping her to
him, begged to be forgiven, and vowed he
rose for all the hot.house flowers in Chris
| tendon,
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

THE VALUE OF THE SABBATH DAY
The Working Mems Lords, Day Rest As.
sociation in England is actively opposing
the motions now before Parliament to open
Museums and other public places on Sun.
day. The Association has issued a circular
containing the opinions Of the late and
present Prime Minister on this question.
These will be read with interest. The Earl
Of Beaconsfield said in the House of Lords:
"Of all Divine institutions, the most
Divine is that which secures day of rest
for man. l hold it to be the most valuable
blessing ever conceded to man. 1t is the
cornerstone of civilization, and its removal
might even affect the health of the people.
The opening of Museums on Sundays is
great change, and those who suppose for
moment that it could be limited to the
proposal to open Museums will find they
are mistaken"
Mr.. Gladstone has thus placed himself
on record:
"The religious observance of Sunday is
main prop of the religious character of the
country. From moral, social and physi-
cal point of view the observance of Sunday
is duty of absolute consequence. Believ.
ing in the authority of the Lords-day as a
religious institution, / must as q matter of
course desire the recognition of that au.
thority by others. But over and above
this, l have myself in the course of a
laborious life signally experienced both its
mental and its physical benefits. l can
hardly overstate its value in this view, and
for the interest of the workingmen of this
country alike in these and in other yet
higher respects, there is nothing l more
anxiously desire than they should more
and more highly appreciate the Christian
day of rest.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18
Love in Saugerties.
PURCHASING A HUSBAND FOR DIsH OF ICE
GREAM-wHAT LOOKS LIKE VERITA-
BILE FACTS BUT MAY BE FRoL.
ICSoME FANCY-AN
HEIREss IN THE
FIELD,

A small social circle in Saugerties is now
anXiously awaiting developments in ro-
mantle affair that has come to light within
tho past few days, in which a well.known
young dry goods clerk in Saugerties and
Columbia county belle play the leading
parts. The names of the parties are sup
pressed for various reasons, but the affair
Is OF such an unusual character that it
becomes matter of public comment. On
Friday last the young clerk in question
was busily engaged in cleaning the interior
OF front show window, when n fashiona-
bly, dressed, handsome young lady entered
the store and asked the proprietor in
vlvaClous manner what he would take for
that article in the window, nodding signifi-
cantly toward the young man. The pro-
prietor laughingly replied that he would
sell him for dish Of cream. The young
lady said, livery will | will take him."
and departed, returning a little later in
the day with a lady friend and invited the
proprietor out to a cream saloon to bind
his bargain. Although married man the
proprietor entered heartily into the spirit of
the joke, as he looked upon it, and went
with her. On his return to the store the
young lady accompanied him and said, as
she started to leave, am going home on
Monday noon, so have that article ready
for me, as | shall certainly call for it,"
The clerk in question hereupon demurred,
and said the bargain would not be binding
unless he had dish Of cream as WELL At
which the young lady said, "Very we'll,
you also shall have the cream" and left,
returning in few moments with a dish of
cream in her hands. The young man de.
voured the cream and enjoyed social chat
with his purchaser, and becoming quite
interested in her made up his mind to
stick. On Monday afternoon, the young
lady, true to her premise, drove up in a
hack to the merchants establishment on
Main street and out stalked her purchase
clad in a new linen duster and store
clothes, and with hand bag and sun um-
brella in hand. The hack drove off amid
the laughter and best wishes of the fellow
clerks of the young man and the congratu.
lations of the proprietor to the young lady,
who warranted the young man to wear
well, hold his color till the keg runs dry
| and that he would never fade or shrink
from paying his washerwoman's account
The party took the 2:39 train up, and on
Monday evening the merchant received a
telegram from the young lady stating that
she had arrived safe with her purchase
The young lady is an heiress to large
| fortune and is worth $4,000 in her own
name, and is about twenty years old. The
young man is fine looking, has neat
little bank account of his own, and all say
that the young lady may "go further and
fare worse. ."-hingStOn Nv. ~ Daily Freeman
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18
The Moral of a Story.

There is story of lad who wrote
composition on pins, in which he asserted
that "pins have saved the lives of a great
many people," When asked how that
could be, he replied, " By not swallowing
them" That lad was q philosopher. He
had discoved an important principle OF
morals and common.sense.
How much trouble in church affairs
could be prevented by the timely applica
ton of this principle. The best way to heal
breaches caused by church quarres is not to
harbor church quarrels. BY carefully alb
staining from all things that have tendency
to result in contentious and heart.burnings
"a comparatively easy thing to do-great dis
asters may be prevented. A whole fire
department cannot put out great fire, but
any child can refrain from playing with
matches. The same rule is a good one for
the pastor. The true way to reconcile
opponents is not to make any-to be so
| wise and circumspect that even malice
itself can find no prcteXt on which to hang
| a complaint. In the matter of church
| finances the rule is just as good. The way
| to pay church debts is to make none. 1t is
better than fair, better than a subscrip.
ton, better even than Mr.. Kimball, for
either of these may fail, but the rule is in
fallble.
1t is an excellent principle to govern
ones every day life, too. There is no way
of getting out Of scrapes half so good as not
getting into them. The man who doesn't
do bad thing won't have TO undue it, that
is certain. Nobody has to rectify mistakes
except the one who makes them. Ifmatters
were never allowed to get ked, it would
not be necessary to set them straight. The
boy was right. A few persons have lost
their lives by swallowing pins, but thou
sands have had their lives seved by no
swallowing them. 1t is better prescrip
than half of those found in medical books
Try it.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18
True to Life.

Some supposed friends of newspaper
have queer ideas as to what kind Of items a
paper really requires. Not long since a
gentleman came into the Galveston NclcS
sanctum and said: "Look hereI You
miss heap of live items. I'm on the
street all day; Ill come up every once in
while and post YOU"
" All right; fetch on your item but, re-
member, we want news"
Next day he came up, beaming all over.
I've got live item for you. You know
that internal bewlegged gorilla of brother
in-law of mine, who was in business with
me?"
!" believe I remember such a person."
said the editor wearily.
We'll, I've Just got news from Nebraska
where he is living, that he is going to run
for the legislature. Now just give him a
blast. Lift him out of his boots. Don't
spare him on my account"
Next day he came up again. Ny little
item got crowded out. l brought you
some news" And he hands in an item
about his cat as follows:
" a remarkable anImul.-ihe family cat
of our worthy and distinguished fellow
townsman Smith, who keeps the boss gro.
Gerry store of ward thirteen, (beer always on
tap,) yesterday became the mother of five
singularly marked kittens. This is not the
first time this unheard-of event has taken
place. We understand Mr.. Smith is favor.
ably spoken of as candidate for alder
man."
The editor groans in spirit as he lights a
cigar with an effort. 1t is not long before
he hears that Smith is going round saying
that he has made the paper what it is, but
it was not independent enough for place
like Galveston.
Many readers will say this sketch is over
drawn, but thousands of editors all over the
country will lift up their right hands to
testify that they are personally acquainted
with the guilty party.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

About year ago, NJ. j. Cahill, editor of
the Pilot (ChiCago) placed his four daugh-
ters, May, Caddy, Clara and Maud, in
charge of the Grey Nuns, Buffalo, N. Y,
with instructions to protect them and give
attention to their education. He did not
conceal the fact that he was led to do this
because he was unable to live with his wife,
and was about to be divorced from her.
On Sunday evening plainly dressed lady
at the Palace Hotel asked the clerk to pro-
vide her with carriage as she was about to
remove her children from the Academy of
Holy Angels. Telling the driver to wait at
the gate, the lady entered the grounds,
found the children in an srbor, confronted
the Sister in charge and said she was their
mother, and proposed to take them away
Knowing the circumstances under which
they had been placed at the academy the
Sister quickly realized that this was to
be an abduction. The woman then
drew revolver from her pocket and
threatened to shoot anyone who interfered
with her. This created panic among the
pupils, who scampered out of harms way,
except May, Caddy, Clara and Maud Cahill,
who seemed willing enough to obey their
mother. Keeping Sister St. Stephen COW
cred with the revolver, Mrs. Cahill beat a
lively retreat to the street with her little
ones, and reaching the carriage was driven
rapidly away.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

A FASHIONABLE WoMAN's PRAYER.-
Strengthen my husband, and may his faith
and his money hold out to the last.
Draw the lambs wool of unsuspicious
twilight over his eyes, that Irritation may
look to him like victories, and that my bills
may strengthen his pride in me.
Bless, oh fortune my crimps, rats and
frizzles, and let thy glory shine on my paint
and powder.
Enable the poor to shift for themselves,
and save me from all missionary beggars.
Shed the light of thy countenance on my
camels hair shawl, my lavender silk, my
point lace, and my necklace of diamonds,
and keep the moth out of sybles, beseech
thee, oh fortune!
When walk out before the gaze of vul-
gar men regulate my wriggle and add new
grace to my gait.
When | bow myself to worship, grant
that l may do it with ravishing elegance,
| and preserve unto the last the lily white oil
my flesh and the taper of my fingers.
fingers.
| Destroy mine enemies with the gall oi
jealousy, and eat up with the teeth of envy
all those who gaze at my style.
| Save me from wrinkles and foster my
plumpers.
Fill both my eyes, oh fortune with the
plaintive poison of infatuation, that | may
Law out my victims-the men-as dumb al
images graver.
Let the lily nd the rose strive together
on my cheek, and may my neck swim like
a goose on the bosom of chrystal water.
Enable me, oh fortune to wear shoe
still a little smaller, and save me from corn
and bunions.
Bless Fanny, my lap.dOg, and rain dowr
hailstones of destruction on those who shal
hurt hair of Hector, my kitten.
Smile, oh fortune most sweetly upol
Dick, my canary, and watch with the fond
ness of spirit over my two lily white mic
with red eyes.-Erchange.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18
TRUST AND REST.

Fret not, poor soul. while doubt and fear
Disturb thy breast;
The plying angels who can see
How vain thy wild regret must be,
Say, trust and rest.
Plan not nor scheme; but calmly wait;
His choice IS best;
While blind and erring is thy sight,
His wisdom sees and judges right,
So, trust and rest.
Strive not nor struggle; thy poor might
Can never wreSt
The meaneSt thing to serve thy will;
All power is His alone: be still
And trust and rest.
Desire not: selflove is strong
Within thy breast,
And yet He loves thee better still:
So let Him do His loving Will,
And trust and rest.
What dost thou fear? His wisdom rcigns
Supreme, confessed;
Ills power is infinite; His love
Thy deepest, fondest dreams above
So trust and rest.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

IT Was LUCKY FOR HIM.-Some weeks
since, while a party of Detroit surveyors
were running q railroad line down in Indi.
ana, the survey carried them across a ceme-
terry. In the course of the survey a small
stake was drives into grave and before it
it could be removed and carried ahead, a
lathy, ong.legged Hoosier overhauled the
the men, peeled off his coat and danced
around as he yelled out:
"Show nae the man who dared drive that
stake in that grave"
ave are going TO remove it," quietly re-
piled one of the party.
"I don't care if you are show me the
man."
"Well, I'm the man, and what are you
going to do about it ~ said the big man of
the lot as he stepped out.
"Didn't you know that was my wife's
grave 7'' asked the Hoosier, with consid.
erable fall of his voice.
"No, sir"
"well it is, sir--my first wife's grave"
"And what of thatT
"What Of that Why-why, sir, il
hadn't married a second one about month
ago and kinder forgot my grief, I'd take
that stake and pin you to the fence with It.
It's lucky for you feilers, mighty lucky for
you that / don't feel as bad as did,"
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

GIRLS TALE.-Conversation overheard
where party of girly are trying to fish:
"0h, see one !"
"Where7"
"Oh, my, so he isp'
"Let's catch him ~
"Who's got the bait?"
" You lazy thing, you're sitting on my
polei"
ooh, something got my hook ~
"Pull up you little idiotr'
"Oh, murder take it away Ugh, take
it away, the nasty thing ~
How will it ever get off?"
"Ain't it pretty p
Wonder il it amt dryT
"Poor little thing let's put it back
again. u
:" How will ii get the hook from its
mouth y
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Partial census returns from Virginia
show an unlocked for increase in popula-
ton. Returns from twelve counties in the
first congressional district and one county
in the fourth district show population of
1851, against 1882 in 1870, gain of
$4,000 since 1870, whilst the second congress
sional district shows population of 1885,
l60, against 1864 in 1870, a gain of
36,546. Norfolk county shows a gain of
nearly 5000 Accomac 1900, Southampton
5000, Nansemond 1000, and SO on.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Some men are born to bad luck. New
Hampshire man went through three years
of the war and wasn't even scratched or
sick day, while his next neighbor got q
wound in the only battle he was in that en-.
titles him to big pension, while the first
poor fellow has to work for living.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Prior to the Presidential election on
November 2, elections occur in the follow.
ing States: Arkansas, September 6; Yer.
mont, September 7; Maine, September l3;
Colorado, October 5; Georgia, October 6,
apd Indiana, Ohio and West Virginia,
October IL.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

General Hancock says "the bayonet is
not fit instrument for collecting the votes
of freedmen" They seem TO have 80 many
votes down in Alabama as to suggest-the
fitness Of six.tined pitchforks to collect
m.-PhiLd, Record.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

One can not be too careful out of his diet.
A Delaware parson ate some peaches which
were so wicked as to fall from the tree last
Sunday, and in two hours he became SO
demoralized that he went fishing.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

1t was found that the bodies of the men
entombed in the Hudson river tunnel
could not be rescued by means Of the Golfer
dam and the immediate construction of a
caisson was decided upon. II is now
thought the bodies cannot be recovered in
less than four weeks. About $4,000 have
thus far been spent in the attempt.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Duced queer how men differ about differ
ent things. When a man hooks lot of
fish he will brsg about it for three days,
and when he hooks lot of apples he hasn It
a word to say about it.-BoSton Post.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

During the rebellion thirteen slave States
furnished 432,272 troops for the Union
army. This appears from the records Of
the War Department.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

A West Virginia postmaster has con.
tributed $40 Confederate bill toward the
Republican campaign. lfsverybody should
do that, the Republicans would be so handi.
capped that the Democrats might win.
Then the Democrats would make Confed.
crate money illegal tender, and all the Re.
publicans would be rich.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

The mule would be good symbol for
independent journalism. The mule always
goes for the biggest bundle of hay, but
while eating is very apt to kick the man
who feeds it.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Thirty.nine men have been executed in
New York during the last fifty years-fif-
teen of them since the war.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Dentists make a fat living in Maine.
The inhabitants of that State are obliged to
keep all their teeth in good order, for
should they lose one or two they would be
unable to pronounce the name of their
place of residence.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

BARRIERS are strange beings. They are
always anxious to scrape an acquaintance
yet are the very first to cut them.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

"What must 1 do" asked a mean and
conceited man of friend who knew him
well, "to get a picture of the one l love
most?" "Sit for your own portrait" was
the reply.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

There is farmer in the country so mean
that he would not stop harvesting and let
his city cousins drive round the country
with his horses.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

A pretty girl seldom has any luck at fish.
ing. The fish, like men, are easily dis.
tracted by pretty face, and lose their ap.
petites.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Ladies are like watches-pretty enough
to look at; sweet faces and delicate hands,
but somewhat difficult to "regulato' after
they are set a.going.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

At all-Match.making mamma to her
manageable daughter: "Virginia, dear,
don't lose sight of that gentleman in mourn
ing. He may be q widower."
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Difference in mothers. Tommy Whose
mamma had been reading to him about Eve
and the serpent She wasn't like you,
mamma, for you're afraid of mousse
judy.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Brunetts are coming into fashion again.
II is long time since they have had an in
ming.
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18
BOARDING.

Three our four gentlemen can get good board al
Ai'uei@'e laws MRS. E. GRIFFITH,
Delaware Street, Smyrna, Del
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Job Work neatly done at the TIsns Office
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

Sara Bernhardt has q great advantage
over other actresses. If, in making her
exit, the canvas door is accidentally fasteD-
ed she does not go blundering around
hunting for another entrance. She just
turns her side to the audience and they
think she has left the stage. lll s.."
Smyrna times., 1880-08-18

A Philadelphia preacher has discovered
that when satan goes fishing Ssr men me-
bats his hook with Ia woman. - Lo.0a' esato' az.
Register. a That naughty cysieisna originally
appeared in the Netss and no Ph.isdslpha@
preacher should be held responsible ior ~
as the editor who clipped the paragraph
knoYs.