The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1880-04-10
An Amusing Incident.

This story is told of one OF the wealthy
residents of Wethersfield, and it is
vouched for as true in every particular
Perhaps it might be little too personal
to give his real name, so for the pur-
poses of our sketch we will call him
Doctor. The Doctor is solid man in
more senses than one-he is solid in
money and means and his advoirdupois
cannot be surpassed by any one man in
town, his weight being close upon three
hundred pounds. He invariably carries
well-stuffed pocket book around with
him, and he is blessed with the happy
faculty of holding on to what he has
got. He never heads subscription
list, though what he might do in this
direction will never be known until
some man with the requisite pluck can
befound to ask him. Almost any cautious
man would prefer to let out that job to
some stranger by the month. He would
not, when at church, consider it an I'M
pardonable sin if the deacon should go
right by him with the contribution box.
And he would not be mean enough to
call it back again. But this talk is
superfuous, as the good deacon never
forgets him. But when the contribution
box is showed into the Doctors face he
gives sleepy yawn and don't give any
thing else. In fact the Doctor may be
called o little close. But on one occa-
sion he astonished an old resident of
the town by an unexpected streak of
liberality, which we will now relate.
One day his plethoric calf-skin was
missing and with it $1,000 in bank
notes. If an electric battery had poured
a broadside down the Doctors spinal
column he could scarcely have felt a
greater shock. His hands flew from
pocket to pocket, and his face length
ened and took on a lugubrious and sor-
rowful air. If he had been a "poor
lone widow" and the little all had taken
wings, the CONSERVATION could not have
been greater. He lost his mental
equilibrium and was dancing round on
the ragged edge of despair. Finally he
bethought himself of a visit he had
made that morning to Bill Wells, on
| Wolcott Hill. where he went to look at
SOW. The Doctor reasoned that his
lost pocket book was in the pen against
which he leaned. He assumed that il
would be an easy matter for it to drop
out of his pocket with his body thrown
| forward in the manner he remembered
it had been. 1t was think and go with
| him. He clambered into his old lum ber-
box wagon and headed his untamed
Bucephalus toward Bill Wells. He
only thought of that well-stuffed pocket
book at the bottom of the hog-pen, and
in his minds eye he saw that big old
SOW granting with satisfaction as she
poked and rooted his bank notes about.
He dashed his horse into a run, and the
good people of Wethers6eld wondered
what the matter was as the old Doctor
Numbered along at John Gilpin gait.
The Doctor lost his hat when opposite
the postoffice, but he did not stop to
pick it up. From this point he went
bareheaded, and the old horse did
credit to the breed. He must have
been descendant of Eclipse; at all
events, the record he made in that old
lumber-box, with three hundred
pound driver, eclipsed by far anything
he ever attempted before. On reach
ing his destination he rushed to the
pen, expecting to see the wreck of his
pocket-book scattered around the pen.
But he was disappointed. Not sign
was there.
"By Godfrey, the Doctor exclaimed.
=" the old SOW. has swallowed it whole y
Then Mr.. Wells appeared on the
scene, and in a moment the excited
Doctor cried out, What'n you take
for that sowPn
go, l don't know" moderately re-
sponded the other.
81 don't want any don't knows
about it" roared the Doctor. ''What'Il
you take for that SOW, / sayP"
81 don't know as want to sell il. {"
replied Mr.. Wells, who evidently didn't
understand the situation.
"You must sell it. Set your own
price, but | must have that sow,n
pleadingly argued the Doctor. At this
Mr.. Wells thought the Doctor had gone
crazy and tried to soothe him. But
this only made the old fellow more
angry and excited, and he almost
danced over the quiet manner of the
other.
"Set the price," he shouted, . set
the price, say"