St. Landry democrat., 1880-10-16
ALL SORTS.
No legacy is so rich as honesty.

/ upset the gravy.
"A young lady is like tree, you eau
generally estimate her age by the huln-
| Der of her rings.
The longest bridge in the Worid ls
! the Tensas and Mobile bridge, at the clIy
of Mobile. 1t is fifteen miles long.
The new style of collecting Dllls Is
to shove six-shooter into the lace U.
the debtor, and exclaim NOW Ill
you, shell.'
Any corporation ought to sit down
upon any citizen who hasn't enteIpllso
enough to lie like blazes about its popu-
lation.-[ Houston Post.
In Choctaw, Miss, there is a glrl s1a -,
years of age, weighing "a pounds anu -
inches high, six toes on each foot anu
eleven fingers.
John Hicks goes to the penitentiary
for two years, at JettersOnvllle, lnu., ab
the age of so. lie has spent fifty years
of his life in prisons.
-DeJarnette, of Danville, Va. who
killed his sister in a house OF lll,1ame'
| and was sentenced to be hanged, mas
been awarded a writ OF error ana super
sedeas.
! The old gentleman who spent a tor
tune in endeavoring to hatch colts 1r0ih
| horse -chesnuts is now cultivatlng tho
egg plant with view to raising chick
ems from it.
/ "A newspaper correspondent III an
| interior village has been so badly fright
ened by the roughs that he sleeps IN u
| tree and draws up the ladder after him.
! Houston Post.
A Texas matron, some day sago, was
| astonishcd by little Susie's eXclalmlns.::
81 don't want to be an angel, ma"
"Whv, Susieo ~ "Because | don't want
to leave all my fine clothes and wear
feathers like a hem
Eve are all animals said HOus-
ton convert to Darwinism the other day.
81 am kin to the lower animals Il al
ways thought you We're relatlye OF tho
ass family" replied his wife. The con-
versation suddenly lropped.-LPost.
A man coming out of a newspaper
office with his nose spread all over his
viewed him, 81 didn't like an article that
'peared in the paper last week an went
in ter see the man who writ, an he war
thar"
They have a new way of curing snor-
ing in Waco. The other night a saloon
keeper, disturbed by the cultural noises
of an itinerant Teuton in an adjoining
room, seized pair of cd boots and
nearly wore them out on the sleeper
Houston Post.
there ~ asked one young man OF anOth-
er. "Yes,n was the reply. "Well," said
the first speaker 'my betrothed is hand
somer than that apple" "Humph +!
Handsome apples are often souri," was
the unkind response.
A Portland, Maine, fisherman, while
mackereling off the Cape in his wherry
few days ago, was attacked by sword
fish, which drove his sword through the
bottom of the boat, and was held SO
tight that the fish was killed. 1t weighed
800 pounds.
A youngster, while warming his
, hands at the fire, was demonstrated with
by his father, who said: "Go away from
, the fire; the weather is not cold" 81
amt heating the weather: Pm warming
, my hands, the little fellow demurely
! replied.
-"How did you feel, Sally, when he
IL
. Polly. "Why,n said Sally, "I felt all
overish like, just as if was in a railway
Y tunnel, with a train of cars coming each
, way, and was sure of being crushed to
: death. Q LOrdy, how he hugged me!n
2 The "hy suffocator," an insect re-
e sembling the mosquito, is the latest
! atfiction that has visited the Russian
[ peasantry. Last month, in one district
alone, 14s head fof cattle, 2 horses, 212
: sheep, and 173 pigs were killed by it.
0 The flies are said to enter the air pass
u ages of the animals and thus suffocate
: them.
e -"Well, Father Brown, how did you
Q like the sermon yesterday ~ asked a
+ young preacher. aye see, parson,n was
d the reply, 81 haven't a fair chance at
s them sermons of yours. There's old
= Miss Smithie, Widow Taft, an Ryan's
n darters, an Nabby Brit, an all the rest
v setting in front OF me with their mouths
/. wide open a swallerin' down all the best
. of the sermon, an what gets down to me
h is putty poor stuff, parson, putty poor
Il stuff
q 1t is stated that a prominent citizer
y of Galveston was brought home very
4 late one night in comatose condition
u u His terrified wife, thinking it was apo
10 plexy, sent for the family physician
=, The doctor examined the patient care
" fully, and then directed the clergyman
i to be sent for. In few minutes th,
" " spiritual adviser was bending over th,
20 20 couch of the dying man. Finally tn.
~ clergyman said: "Wby lie is drunk
that's what's the matter! Why am
sent for here at 12 o'clock at night !!
''Do You suppose" replied the doctor
s. chat | am going TO be the only fool O,
IS Galveston island ?"-LEx.
'" "A little girl, who is as cute as cute
IS ness itself, was going down town yes
.. terday, when She was requested to bu,
!. several articles of dry goods for lad,
d friend. Among them was pair of stock
"a ings. When she returned it was discoy
n cred that she had forgotten to purchas
HI the hose. She was very much annOye
n at her forgetfulness for a moment, an
~ then bright idea struck her, and sh
= gleefully exclaimed: "I'll get them to
~, n, morrow, and then you'll have 'em clear
a. If you had them now they'd be soiled b
y Nc that time.n The lady laughiDgly con
,I soled herself with the reflection.
H. Not many miles from New Bedfor
u a small company OF colored brethren de
- =. cided "to take up collection" The pre-
70 70 siding officer offered to pass the hat him
vi self, and in order to encourage the otl
as ers he put in ten cent piece. After tin
ne collection, during which every hand ha
ey been in the hat, the president approach