The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1880-02-26
Vartety.
VARIETY NEWS.

A "tire annihiator' hickory wood.
A dentists sign-Drawing, music and dancing
Now is good time to lay in your winters cold.
First bus in America Christopher Columbus.
The man who pays cash is s:person Of no &C.
count.
Fall fashions-Coal. hole covers are worn
smooth.
Wendell Phillips has been trained "tOO fine"
for an art critic.
Church fairs are no good in any month that has
no bazaar In 1t.
Cincinnati is simply consolidated brewery,
with expectations.
A dead beat was caught "Cabbaging" turnips
| in West Cambridge.
1t is best to put off till tomorrow things you
cannot possibly do to-day.
The meanest bark of dog is wheu he barks
your shins with his teeth.
Sydney Smith ,said;to Macauley that he talked
| like BOOK in breeches.
Book. keeping may be taught In alessOn Of three
words-neVer lend them,
Cleveland girls always answer "you bet when
marriage is proposed to them.
what's the use OF crying over split milk2 1t only
makes It more Watery.
Here's an inscription for gamblers purse :
EpEuribuS unER-WOn from many.
For weights that are light and tricks that are
vain the sellers Of coal are peculiar.
Sara Barnhardt Is credited with the remark that
an honest child is the nobleSt work Of God.
A shakespeariAn student says that the Court
ney. y.HanlRn race 10 modern instance OF wise
saw.
You never know that the country Is on the verge
Of ruin until Il becomes necessary to choose new
officers,
A Western editor says Ihe would have bought
that block of.aNew York. Central stock had he
known II was for sale.
Pennsylvania claims to: have female burglars
though we don't know that they're any better
than the old fashioned kind.
man has been on the Baltimore police twenty
two years and never caught anything but a cold
And really 1t caught him.
DR.. Mary Walkers reason may be restored. Ed
iaon Is said to be at work on an inVenton to KEEP
pautaloons from bAgging.
Denis Kearney arrested On, the Slimy imps,
The leprous minions Of the bloated bOndholders
To the rescue, General Butler
"Be lust and fear not" says the prOverb, but q
man may be as just as ArisLides and yet he'll fesr
when he sees cross dog coming.
The undertakers have an organ called "The
Casket" published in Rochester. The sections
should have one and call 1t "The Trance Crypt
II a hunter will only hunt long enough he will
be sure 10 pull his gun over the fence by the mug
Gle, and the day he. does that he quits hunting,
They say "a man is known by his associates
OF course he Is; man can't associate with people
for any length OF time without their knowing
him.
> Two men started out to see who could tell the
biggest lie. No. commenced; "A wealthy coun
Try editor. No, stopped him right there and
paid the forfeit.
g ItIsa pity that there is not an academy in thiI
, count. A woman who has sccess TO the silung'
OF the French academy can wear shabby clothes
in the AneLt company.
He said to her: THE moon Is always just The
same and yet always find some new beauty IL
it," She said to him Its just SO with the circus
He bought tickets for two.
Music teacher to scholar: "You see that not
with an open space; thatsa whole note. Can yoI
remember thalH" Scholar; "Yes'm. whole not
is note that has s'hole in IT,"
. One witness, tesufying against another befor
the Senate committee in New Orleans, said, Hi
: ureputation for yeracity is bad" This woult
I, mean that his reputation for lying is good.
: man in rural settlement who has been al
inveterate smoker for the last twenty years, ha