Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1880-07-15
Stories About Ministers.

DR.. John Hall, in q recent address at
Madison. Wis, told several very good
stories.
He said that he knew a preacher in
Ireland who used to come down from
his pulpit every Sunday, after the ser.
mon, and the people, passing in a line
in front of him, would shake hands and
pass the compliments of the day. One
elder told the pastor one day, "Let the
Lord keep you humble, sir, and we will
keep you poorr' But that is the policy
of too many church boards, imbued as
they are with the notion that the minis.
try should be kept on the apostolic plan
Of poverty and humility.
DIR. Hall told a story related to him
by the late Richard Winter Hamilton, a
prominent Congregationalist in En-
gland. Mr.. Hamilton, being called to
fill a pulpit in a provincial town, was
waited on in the vestry just before the
service by the presenter of the meeting;
the latter laid down programme which
provided for a very short prayer and a
shorter sermon, but several intermina-
bly, long hymns. Sale. the presenter:
Our people are a peculiar people; we
are very fond of music and plenty of it,
and we are not fond of long prayers or
long sermons; in asking you to cut it
short, sir, wish to emphasize as before
that we are fond of music, because in
Heaven singing is the chief order of the
dayr' Mr.. Hamilton answered, " 1t is
comfort, sir. to know that you will not
be there to lead itr'
There are funeral ministers, said DIR.
Hall; gentlemen who carry around with
them an air of professional solemnity;
they carry it even in their hat bands and
pocket handkerchiefs, and look continu-
ally as if genteely laid out in their cof-
fins. There was minister of this sort
called on to marry ayOung couple; he
stretched out his hands and uncon-
sciously commenced the burial service.
" Sir" spoke up the young man. " we
came to be welded, not buried!' To
which the gentleman of the cloth re-
sponded. alt won't be many years be-
fore you'll wish you had been buried"
Ministers should be men first, then min
and Goodness are
twin qualifications.
Then come your fluent ministers.
Turn on the faucet and the stream
flows. The less they have to say, the
shout. Lyman Beecher, on returning
home from church one Sabbath, said
that he felt he had done very poorly.
Said one of his boys: "Why, father,
l thought you were never in better
trim; you just shouted it out to EN-"
"Aye, ave." replied Mr.. Beecher,
/" that's it exactly; when I'm not pre-
pared I always hOller at the top of my
voice."
The doctor told the story of simple,
Irish pastor he used to
know, in the old country. Each year
he used to go up to the General As
sembly, for there every minister is ex-
officio delegate; whenever the time
came for making the announcement of
this annual vacation, the pastor would
give out; "May it phase the congrega-
ton mkt Lord Day I'll be vacantr'
leaving it for the ways to make the in
quiry whether or not he were not va
can't more than one Lords Day in the
year. Such as these are children OF
unconventional and
often splendid noble men. He well re-
one such in Ireland-''and,"
said DIR. Hall, "although many stories
related in this way are not strictly true,
assure you this one am about to tell
you isl He said that this simple,
,oorly paid, but honest and noble
earted pastor was riding along one
ay. and seeing laborer at work in !