The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1880-11-30
FACTS AND FsNCiEs
The secresive reporter is an item misor.

What is the spot most dear to c,t,,o,
Their fodderland.
The latest boom isthat of the sunse, gun
l-[Now York News. 3 -"
Ona windy day everything looks blew
Bottom Transcript.
Always in orjer-o, Not alwavs in oras,
owe Whitehall Times.
May defeated base. ball.t be called n
blue DISQUALIFICATION News.
Two sightIess lovers have been married in
Cincinnati. They went it blind.
A Kentucky hamlet i. spoken of as the
horse whiPpns'st village in he state.
Thanksgiving impends, and turkeys mus,
socn come to thyme. - Boston Transcript.
The Cincinnati Saturday Night believes
legs. ''"'
| CHARLES Lamb remarked of one of his
Grltlcs; "rhe mere think Of him tho less
| think of him."
The sign Of an eating-houae ,hat never
CLOSES Oysters open all night Boston
Globe.
Returned from the chase: "Well, uncle.
What have you killed." Time, my dear."-
Paris Paper.
A faint pocket book never won fair lady.
1t is the man who WINS New Orleans Pic
ayune.
Canada has no mint, and consequently tho
julips Of this country must lack flsvor,-TTo
ronto Grip.
Some wise man writes: "Bustlo is not in
dusiry." Neither is CORSET finance
dolphia Record.
A new brand Of tobacco is called the "Buzz
Saw" "Einc Cut" Of course.- New York
Commercial Advertiser,
met good If detached nlny apply az well
70 married ptopls as to railroad tickets. 49,
LCincinnati Saturday Night.
Never run up small debts. Creditors are
like children the smaller they arc the moro
they cry.-[ Wall Street Gs2eito.
The girls have taken TO ctrryiog Gamer.
and, young men, il yen don't want your eve
prodded out mind it, Boston Post
Young mercsntls mon who go on, collect.
ins" are often found collecting at the thea.
tiers ON matinee days. New Orleans Pea
yune.
A man may carry watch fer years and
still be unfamiliar with the wheels of the
little ticker. They travel in cog Boston
Globe.
FemLle economy-buving a half dollar
straw hat, then putting eleven aud hnlf
dollars worth Of trimming on it.-New York
truth.
The ancient maiden who dsfers her pro.
position of ma,riaga much longer will soon
have Mr.. Chances for this lesp year.
Modern Argo.
A man has no remedy TO; bis hair falling
out. A woman can always use bairpins. and
keep on as much hair es she likes II New
Orleans PlCnyune.
IT'S said that pride must have a fall. tits
probably when arayed in gorgeous colors, AZ
with the fall Of The year.---Boston Trans
cript.
Ii is proposed to make education a neccss-
sary qualification in future pedestrian
matches, so that he who runs may read.-
Cincinnati Saturday Night.
A Boston man has invented now word.
"Astronometeorology," and already there arc
six men in the country who can pronounce
it.-[BOston Post.
Two captains quVrrelod about woman
and challenge passed. "WhRt folly,' said
the fair one. 1T is not with iron or steel,
but with goldyou should fight for me."--
Paris Paper,
The Vermont housewife who read that
English mobiles have lots of hares in their
preserves says she tried it ia some black berry
am and doesn't believe tho foreign stories.
: Boston Globe.
We are progressing rs a nation toward
refinement. The whsolbarrow is now called
tho unicyclc, BUTT is Just as hard 20 run
with big trnnk on it as !. was under the old
name Boston Post.
A story in one of our exchanges Is calle1
"Love in an Elevator The elevator /.
typical of tho ups and downs" the young
couple will experiences after they are married
Il Norrstown Herald.
A gentleman saw IN old Highlander on,
day fishing with bont pin. He said to III,
man, Fish will never be caught with that
"Ay, they will, tho man replied, if they'll
only take it into thor beads"
An editor in Georgia snys; "Goldis f5unt
in thirty-six counties in this state, silver il
three, copper in thirteen, iron in forty-three
diamonds in twonty-,ix and whisky in all o.
them; and the last gets away with all tht
| rest"
A stranger in Galveston asked an OLE
resident how malarial fever could be dis,
tinguished from yellow fever. "As a gen.
eral thing" was the reply, "you can't tel
until you have tiled il. II you amt alive
then it is most likely yellow fever."- Gal,
weston News.
Mr.. Prigsby (at dinner 10 q fair Knicker.
booker on visit to Boston for the third Oh
fourth timc): "Pve heard you are so sw,
fully, ah, clever, you know" Miss Sharp
Excuse me, Mr.. Prgsby, you must have
made mistake, for assure you I'm next Ia
IN idiol."-Colutnbia Spectator.
1t must be rather trying TO be married ia
an emotional actress, to have her clutc hing
you by the throat at 3 g. m. and shouting in
hoarse stage whisper: "Slave, didst lock
the kitchen door, The key. where is't, quick!
I'll strsngls thee, Dids't lay the milk pitcher
on the outer battlements! Aye, me good
lord, I'm mad."-[New York Commercial.
The prince of Wales Is forty years old,
and now aud then he murmurs in his sleep
smother, dear, don't you think you are
carrying this thing too fart Cawn't you cut
II short, you know" But Mrs. Guelph
points to George III, who lived to be eighty
two, while she is but sixty,two.- Chicago
Inter- Ocean.
"Let nae drink your health" aaid Guzzle.
down, raising his glass "Seoing as you have
none of your own left," replied Waterloo
II suppose must accommodate you. You
| 40 tha briyl in, and M f,rniah thu haolth