Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1880-12-22

tsOtIHes0i Deaths and Marriages inserted gratis bu
= al tne rate OF hve cents per line.
j. A hardy seaman who had escaped on,
@ oil the recent shipwrecks upon our coast
v was asked by good lady how he felt wher
d t6e waves went over him. He replied
It wet, ma'am; very wet.'
g Men often iump at conclusions ~ save
: he proverb. So do dogs. One recently
d Jumped at the conclusion of a cat. which
: was sticking through the opening of a
, partly closed door, and caused a great dis.
+, turbance.
l Does the conversation and carriage of
| your new minister become the gospelp''
asked learned bishop of simple minded
lirmer WE'LL" was the reply, "bis
, conversation is rather fluid and he doesn't
, keep carriage"
Inc locomotive publishes engravings in
eacn issue showing how boilers look inst
after they have exploded This doesn't
seem TO hit the case at all. What is needed
Is picture showing how boiler looks
lust before 1t IS going to explode We
could then learn how to get out of the
Way.-New Haven Register.
Did you hear abont the bov beino
washed ashore" asked Gillhooly of one
OF the most prominent citizens of Gal
weston. No; when did it happenp pr
lhls morning." "How was tp" :" He
was washed ashore by his mother. You
aoh suppose she would take him out
into the middle of the Gulf of Mexico to
wash him do youP" Galveston Ncoos.
am happy kase I haven't 'spected too
much. | am happy kase doan iigger on
what havh't got am happy kase I
reason dat de weather can't alius be Far.
money can't allus last, and yer best friends
| can t allus be counted on. If dar am anv
secret OF happiness, l believe it am dis
Bro. GGrdner.
lhe Locomotive publishes engravinos in
each issue showing how boilers look inst
alter they have exploded This dosont
hit the case at all What is needed il a
picture showing how boiler looks lust
before it is going to explode. We could
then learn how to get out of the wav.-
Neao HaUen Register
While contemplating death as probably
near Matthew Henry thus prayed. Il
commit my family to my Heavenly Father,
TO God even my own God, nv fathers
God, my childrens God. Oh, pour ont
my Spirit upon my seed. Thy blessing,
that blessing of blessings, upon nv off.
spring that they may be praisng God ON
earth while am praising Him in heaven.
When old Mrs. Bunsby had qot
through reading in the morning paner an
account of the last fire she turned her
spectaces from her eyes to the ton of her
head and remarked "If the citv fireman
would wear the generwine bum.knit
stockints, such as we make and wear in
the country, they wouldn't be Dustin of
their hose at every fire."
In the frequent and severe chances of
weather at this time of the year, people
snould take extra care of their health
nara COLDS are the causes of multitude
OF other disorders. Good sound health
Is the best kind of wealth. as all discover
sooner or later. Old Mother Partinpton
was both apt and truthful when she
declared that, "There is no bessino like
health, particularly when you are sick"
A DICoNsoLATE looking tramp dropped
IN on Main street saloon the other morn.
ing just at lunch time, and anchored his
rags ana forlorn countenance Just off the
lunch counter, and began talkino on
stores. The boys" regarded him with
interest as they too pecked at the dishes
: You look said one of them to the new
conner like the prodigal SON" .Yesp"
'ald the tramp meekly, 'feedin' with the
1ogs' hayP' And there conversation
'eased or at least it drifted gradually into
=, new channel. 'f1''
An old man who was taken for tramn
iled IN Wayside wagon house near
few days ago. He was
dressed. having on two woolen
'oals ana Two pairs of faded trowsers, and
vas covered with lice and filth, Yet
vhen vnhe the coroner held an inquest, $3.50
were found in the old mans pocket
ma IN TIN box which he had carried
bout In his hands were secreted S19,O50
- per cent bonds. A gold watch
nd handsome chain were also found on
lis person. Strangest of all, the old tramp
urned out to be minister.
Among the curiosities of the censn.
Which has developed no end of cnr;onS
hlngs, is native of Arkansas who wss
ever twenty miles from his birth. n,oce
nd never saw a locomotive. vet is still
citizen of France, having been born in
arkansas three years before the cession
that territory to the United Stntes in
so3. Another curiosity is an Alabama
liant. only twelve years of aoo who
'eighs $50 pounds and is six feet in bioht
'hlle both his parents are of medium Size
ulton county, Georgia, furnishes, in the
erson of Miss Lavinia Cobb, a lady who
as seen her five score years and ten. hnt
llssouri has veteran who was horn in
'76, or four years in advance of the
enerable Lavinia.
Two sisters in Neversink, N. Y. live
'ar TWO brothers, and both couples have
zen engaged for some time. One niobt
'iore the recent election, the eldest sister
ked her intended TO accompany her to a
mocratlc meeting. Being ardentlv re-
lblican, he refused to do so. Yherennon
g asked his brother to escort her. and he
q so. The two thus minated and left
hlnd, felt very indignant, and discussion
owed that both were republican in sen.
nent, while the others were both demo
attic. Finally proposition was made
d accepted, to break off the old loves
d form new alliance. When the 9TH
returned, it was found that they. too.
d resolved on the same course A don.
wedding of considerable political sig
icance is expected to take place during
} holidays.
4 LAWYER CoRNERED.-Not even
7yer however skllful in cross-examtn',
On, can make witness tell the trpfh
vided the witness wishes to evade II
8 impossible to put a question in spch
ct language that it will demand tba
ired answer. 1t was necessary on a
tain occasion in court to compel a wit.
s to testify as to the way in which y
Smith treated his horse We'll, sir y
the lawyer, with sweet and winnino
le-L Smila intanded To draz-..