The Mankato free press. [volume] (Mankato, Blue Earth County, Minn.) 1879-1924, 1880-04-02
lNASBY.

.si NAEBY. ueS Y Es5a
tafir eo-----~~-at gaisetf)Ige
ton at enc Cofnefs, The subject tins
DEF DiscuksiSn Being the Democratic
Nominee fer the RrceiAehheys ialiy 4a
from the Toledo Blade.]
CoNFEpRIT x ROADS (Which Is In the
State NV kentucky, March Is, 1881. =
The question % - .-.a y s,o,As,,,a,,
the Dimocrisy shell nominate for the
presidency hez, agitated the Corners on
commonly NV late. The Dimocrisy NV
the Corners win vote for anybody that
the convenshun chooses to put on the
track, for the Corners Recognize TINT the
fust dooty nv a Dimocrat Is 10 open his
mouth and swaller vatever his leaders
chooze to drop into 1t. The DimocrisS
NV the Corners Is q very easy one to git
on with. None NV 'em read without SIGH
great labor that they RELY don't consid-
rsr j worth while wat it costs, and their
information, like Their close, is ginerally
second handid. TrTs.Lt
1 desided that it wuz best to hold q
meetin to assertane wat wuz the prefer
ences NV the Dimocrisy nv the corners
on this important matter, and akkofdings
ly called one. am ruther fond Nv hold
in meetins; for it not only helps TO- mane;
tame my IMPORTANCE, but ginerally 1
manage to git Bascom interested to the
pint NV askin us all to take suthin, witch
10 soothin to the bowels. Lhkker earned
in TINT way is sweet, for it tastes jest ez
good .ez tho 700 paid for It, and the
gittin tiv it is a triboot to yoor genious.
There wuz great diversity Nv opinyun
ON this pint, and every man In the meetin
he'd candidate nv his own. Deekin
Pogfarh wuz quite yoonaninius In favor
NV Voorhees,, NV nleany, for the first
place on the tillkit, for various reasons.
Fust, there wuzn't any doubt about his
Dimocricy. He wuz doorin the late on
pleasantness stanch friend NV the south,
and is to-day jist ez yooseful to us ez tho
he wuz actilly southern man. In our
iopposishun to seckshuAalism, we insist
upon hevin man entirely southern In
feeliu. The fact that voorhees, is q
northern man does not count agin him:
We ARE oppesedn to seckshHnalism; lind
are willin to vote for northern man; If
we kiu depend upon his entire devoshen
to the south. Tint is all we require.
Another man wantid Tilden, another
Bayard, Nv Delaware, and yit Thurman,
Nv Ohio; while agfeat MANY wuz entire
y willin to support Hancock, and even
Gen. Mcclellan he'd some friends.
FINELY some one asked eff the Dimoc-
iisy NV the Corners he'd thot NV the great
and good Tilden witch wuz swindled out
NV the presidency by eight to seven?
Wuz there no sense NV iustis in the Cor
ners? -,
Ftorn every part NV the meetin-house
ther ariz murgnur NV disapproval.
{ awe don't want no Tilden In onrn, I"
sed sevral; che is the tool NV the bloatid
bondholder!" s
"No Tilden for me-" sed another; che
is opposed to Unlimited green-bax, and
wants to pay off the nashnel debt"
"No Tilden!" shouted the entiremeet-
in, yoonanimusly. Anybody but Til
den."
Deekin Pogram moved that it was the
sense of this meetin that Senator Voor
hees nv Injeany was the proper man to
bear the Dimekratik banner to victry,
and j wuz about to put the moshen when
that onmitigated cuss, Joe Bigler, witch
is torment, rose and said he had a re-
mark to make before the question wuz
put.
care 700 aware, Josef, that this is
Dimekratik meetin," I remarkt.
Hevin inventoried the noses NV them
in attendance, smelt Their breaths, and
gazed on ther clozes, I am aware this Is
D Dimekratik convenshnn." r..
Are 700 Dimekrat, josef" ..a
"Ez am meditatin an entire repoodi-
ashen Nv wat owe, and hev determined
10 quit work and jine the circkle at Bas-
coin'sI kin say l am, or at leest soon
will be-" ....-
"Then 1 'spose we shell hev to heer
wat 700 hev to say" .... III ..
"Uv course 700 will. Yoo ginerally
10 hear what 1 hev to say. Wat I
wanted TO git at is this: The Corners
viii room itself by supporting Voorhees,.
How much does Parson Nasty owe the
Corners?" ....-.
Every man in the awience riz to his
feet ez eff by instink.
she owes me nipety-six dollars !"
yelled Deekin Pogram.
"And me hundred and fortyw ejak-
lated Issaker Gavitt.
And every man Nv EN- statid the miz-
able sum 1 owed him, tell the aggregate
swelled to over thousand dollars.
"po 700 want yoor money!" sed
Jos 4. ..a.
eve dol We dol" sed they in
korus. ...a 49,. .
"My friends" continued he, "Voor-
hees hez no money. Voorhees, hezn't a
cent to buy delegate with, and wat
earthly chance wood our esteemed friend
hev to bring back anything from the
if he goes instructed to vote
for Voorhees,? Nv course he will be yoor
delegate, and NV course 700 expect him
10 come bringin sheaves. Friends NV
the Corners, 700 don't want Voorhees,, eff
700 want your money. You want man
witch hez the disposishun to buy, and the
money 10 buy with" -.~
HUvs course we dow course we
dol On Voorhees!" they all ex-
claimed. la2A s.. .-.i.
"Gentlemen!" sed josef, "what 700
want is Tilden. Tlden hez money
barls Nv it. Tilden is patriot witch
don't want any delegate to vote for him
for nothin. That eminent patriot will be
in Cincinnati with his money. He will
heve his headquarters full NV it, and
whose wants viii be permitted to plunge
into that bari elbow deep. 1t is Nv vital
interest to the Corners that he be our
nominee" - ~
And inmejitly half dozen moved that
the name NV Tilden be substituted for
Voorhees, and it wuz carried yoonani-
musly. (.
Josef Bigier then moved that his es-
teemed friend Nasty be the delegate,
witch wuz carried. 80
Iwuz so grateful to Josef for this that
I actilly come down from the chair and
him. ~
/" Hold on" sed Josef, ego slow,
Palson. I hev anuther moshun to make.
I move also that a committy Of the'Par-
sons creditors be appinted to accompany
him to Cincinnati, to see that after gittin
the money he brings It back with him.
L do not doubt the Parsons onesty, but
1 don't like to expose him to temptashun.
Yooman nachur is week"
And this moshun wuz carried, and
Deelin Pogram, Issaker Gavitt and
Capt. M'Pelter wuz made sed committy,
md they wuz instructed to receive the
themselves, and to divide it pro
rata among my creditors. La yFa
And the meetin adjourned, Josef re-
markin ez we left the house, Saint it
Deekin, how little things
infooence great ones. Only think NV It!
possibly yoor vote will nominate the
great filden. Sposn 700 he'd never
come to the Corners, and never borrered
the old man mite never ltev bin