The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1880-08-06

~ Hslplsssnss Il Han.
MUcH has been said BY the poet. the
essayist and the novelist about the
helplessnessof woman. They have de-
| picted this In touching and eloquent
strains, and Washington Irving has i'm
mortalized it in his famous simile Of
the vine and the oak. It strikes me
with establishment, however, that there
should have been no one, SO tar. toh0ld
up q picture of what Is far more pit
iable-the helplessness Of man. In
certain provinces q man is helpful
enough, but there are phases of his ma
ture and life in which his helplessness
is much more glaring than that of q
woman. To give my readers an exam
Ivy is capable Of finding clean hand
kerchief or any other article of dress for
HIMSELF.
Suppose his better half is suddenly
called of or is detained by household
cares, and he is thrown on his own re-
sources about getting himself out q
handkerchief or any other article Of
dress. His search is as futile as the
various ones that have been made for
the body of Sir John Franklin. The
desired article may be just at hand. but
the '.lords of creation" have q remarka-
BILE talent of not finding anything. even
though it be touching their elbow or
staring them in the face.
<aoocsovH ~, mbsoh c.Oya
shows himself helpless and powerless is
in the presence of the baby (alias the
despot) of the household, who continues
to impose its shackles on its subjects
despite the abolition of slavery and of
serfdom. On Sunday evenings, as the
nurse puts on her "store clothes and
starts out on her Sunday evening stroll,
"the guide man. feels an uncOmforta-
bic sensation steal over him. He reas.
sures himself, however, by the thought
that he has his wife to shelter himself
behind. He stretches himself out on a
luxurious lounge, laying q pile of de-
lightful new magazines and papers be-
side him. He is soon deep in an inter-
esting article, while a merry, good
humored COO from the baby occasionally
breaks on his ear, not disturbing him.
but rather stirring up sentimental and
p0etical feeling, so much so that he
vaguely meditates writing poem to the
child, and even goes so far as to COM
pose the opening clalse-"Oh thou
beauteous babel"
His dreamy and luxurious ease is,
however. at length Interrupted by q
ring at the bell. A note is handed in,
informing them that his wife's aunt is
very sick, and requesting that her
niece come to her as quickly as posi-
BILE. Il will have to leave little Hal
with you short time, Henry, DEAR"
says his wife, cajolingly, ''but will
come back as soon as [ possibly can"
Henry assumes the charge, though
without enthusiasm, and, as his wife
disappears from the door, thought
glimmered over his mind that, al
though women are the weaker vessels,
they are useful enough creatures. At
first all goes merry as marriage bell.
Little Hal condescends to be amused
with his fathers watch and chain, and
to pull his hair and beard most ami
ably. Indeed, the father begins to
think that, after all, the child will not
be serious interruption, and tries to
peep furtively into the latest Scribner
and resume reading the article he had
begun-an experiment which resulted
in little Halls grabbing at the book and
rending in twain several of the choicest
pictures in it, which led his father to
the conclusion that, for the present,
literature had better be put aside. For
a time little Hal seemed amused by the
various things which his father heaped
upon him to play with, nothing in the
room being deemed too rare or choice
for the purpose; but, after q time, like
q youthful Alexander, he began to sigh
for fresh worlds to conquer. He grew
FESTIVE and impatient, and, finally,
broke into q wall, which he continued,
with little intermissi0n till his mother,
after the lapse of two or three hours,
returned and resumed charge of him.
Meantime, his father had stood at bay,
as thorough an embodiment of help
lessness as was ever seen, and no voy-
ager, wrecked on desert isle, ever
hailed the approach of q ship more
gladly than he did that of his wife.
Another case in which q man is help
less is when he comes in contact with
woman who has grudge against him.
He may excel her in reason, logic and
learning, but no matter, he is unable to
measure swords with her. She has
weapons so fine, so keen and so subtle
that, although he can feel them, he can
not see nor touch them. As Mrs.
Browning says, q woman can take fine
cambria needle and torture with it.
A man who has incurred woman's re-
sentiment will be stung and bewildered