Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1880-03-04
A Brakeman's Opinion of
.. Churches. #.i


From Bmrdette Letter IN burlington
Raapkeye. 4gBa
On the road once more, with Leba-
non fading away in the distance, the
fat passenger drumming idly ON the
window pane, the cross passenger
sound asleep and the tall thin pas
senger reading General Grants Tour
Around the World" and wondering
why Screens August Flower" should
be printed above the doors of "A
Buddhist Temple at Benares. To
me comes the brakeman, and seating
himself on the arm of the seat says:
81 went to church yesterday"
EYES," I said, with that interested
infection that asks for more. "And
what church did you attend?"
(Which do you guess?" he asked.
"Some union mission church," l
hazarded.
"Naw," he said. "I don't like to
run on these branch roads very much.
l don't often go to church, and when
/ do, want to run on the main line,
where your run is regular and you
90 on schedule time and don't have
to wait on connections. l don't like
to run ON a branch. Good enough,
but don't like it,"
"Episcopal?" l guessed.
"Limited express" he said, call
palace cars and 81 extra for seat;
fast time, and only stop at the big
stations. Nice line, but too exhaus-
tive for brakeman. All train men
in uniform, conductors punch and
lantern silver-plated, and no train
boys allowed. Then the passengers
are allowed to talk back at the con-
ductor; and it makes them too free
and easy. No, I couldn't stand the
palace cars: Rich road, though.
Don't often hear. of a receiver being
appointed for that line. Some mighty
nice people travel on it, too"
"Universalist?' l suggested.
"Broad-gauge," said the brakeman,
"does too much complimentary busi-
ness. Everybody travels ON q pass.
Conductor doesn't get fare once in
fifty miles. Stops at all flag stations,
and won't run into anything but a
union depot. No smoking-car on
the train. Train orders are vague,
though. and the trainmen don't get
along well with the passengers. No,
don't go to the Universalist, though
1 know some awfully good men who
run on that road"
.sPresbyterian2" 1 asked.
"Narrow-guage, eh ?" said the brake
man, pretty track, straight as rule;
tunnel right through mountain rath-
er than go around it; spirit-level
grade; passengers have to show their
tickets before they get on the train.
Mighty strict road, but the cars are
little narrow; have to sit one in a
seat and no room in the aisle to
dance. Then there's no stop-oyer
tickets allowed; got to go straight
to the station you're ticketed for, or
you can't get on at all. When the
cars full, no extra coaches; cars
built at the shops to hold just so
many and nobody else allowed on.
But yon don't often hear of an acci-
dent on that road. It's run right up
to the rules"
"Maybe you joined the free-think-
ers," I said.
"Scrub road" said the brakeman,
sdirt bed and no ballast; no time
card and no train-dispatcher. All
trains run wild and every engineer
makes his own time, just as be
pleases. Smoke if you want to; kind
of go-as-you-pl please road. Too many
side-tracks and every switch wide
open all the time, with the switch
man sound asleep and the target lamI
dead out. Get on as you please ant
get off when you want to. Dom
i have to chow your tickets, and tn
conductor isn't expected to do any
thing but amuse the passengers. No
4 sir, / was offered a pass, but / dom
! like the line. don't like to travs