The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1880-08-24
Boston Herald
what Will Eliza Say?"

History repeats itself. When Abraham Lin
coin was nominated for the presidency in 1860
his first thought was what the little woman
would think" When Gen. Garfeld's name
charmed harmony out of confusion at Chicago,
the first use which he made of his recovered
self possession was to frame tender message
to the "little wife,. And now Mr.. Osgood,
who has just been nominated as the Enforced
Prohibition" candidate for Governor of Maine,
says the first thing which came into his head
was "What will Eliza say?" The coincidence
is remarkable, as showing the conjugal fidelity
of our great men-if the reporters haven't lied.
But as according to Napoleon, history is only
fiction agreed upon, we may as we'll accept the
incidents as historical, if not true. 1t is to be
regretted that either the imagination of the re-
porter, or the pen of history did not record
what Mr.. Lincoln's and Gen. Garfeld's ''little
women really said or thought; but, making a
postulate of our knowledge of the sex, we may
safely conclude it was to the effect that 81 told
you so," or 81 always knew it, But with
Eliza the case is different. She couldn't have
told anybody so, or have known it without tell.
ing-though that of course, goes without say
ing because her husband himself had no ink
ling of it before. And as women get their DO
itical information, and large share of their
other secrets, from their husbands, she cannot
now impose upon the public any statement
that she "felt it in her bones' or dreamed it
out" at any time in the past The question,
therefore, of what Eliza will say is still an
open one. Coming down from principle to
particulars, and again predicating our remarks
upon knowledge of the sex, we make haste to
crafty Mr.. Osgood's natural curiosity as to the
line of remark adopted by his good wife. Pre-
Stunning that she is a sensible, an honest,
high-spirited and large hearted woman, Eliza
undoubtedly said: They've made tool of
Joshua. I'll teach him better when he gets
home! Setting himself up for Governor, in
deed! It's all he can do to govern himself
with my help and the Lords. S'pose he can't
see that all they want is to elect Fusion
Governor and Legislature, and then where'n
our temperance be? Governor, is it? To 90
rampaging over the State and get 5000 or 1000
votes while those thieving chaps that tried to
steal the state last year scoop in the Offices I'll
govern him when he gets home! It's provok-
ing to see how little it takes to upset man.
Now, there's Joshua. He's done world of
good talking to poor, fallen men, and getting
up reform clubs, and persuading young fellows
drinking is nail in the rumseller's door,
Folks can't sell what nobody wants to buy. I
wish every bar was buried in the bottom of
the ocean, but that amt Joshua's forte. It's
his business to help men and to save them. and
not to set himself UP as the boss constable of
the State, for that seems to be these lunatics'
idea of a Governor. Don't Joshua know that
it is the Presidential year, and everybody is in
downright earnest? What sort of help does he
expect. to get in executing temperance laws
from folks that would try to steal the govern
ment and when caught at it and sent home
with their tails between their legs, come up
the next year and ask the people to give 'em
what they failed to carry off? And how long
does he think the Republicans will keep Maine
at the head of the temperance states, if he and
his clubs go back on them in every pinch?
There's some things almost as bad as liquor,
and cheating in the election and tampering
with the returns, and trying to hold to offices
that you We been voted out of is one of em 1
just wish Joshua was here this minute. I'd
give him my opinion of his third party antics
pretty quick. l 'spose he thinks I'd like to be
spoken of as Mrs. Governor Mrs. Fiddle
sticks I don't tackle kindly to being Mrs.
e-Believe-Run. for Governor so that some
folks whose hands ought to be used in packing
stone for the State may grab the chestnuts that
Joshua has pulled out of the fire!'
And that is what Eliza will say, or words to
that effect, if she is the woman we take her to
be.