The weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1878-1881, 1880-07-13
THE WORLDS FAIR.

When you talk to women you must choose
between lying and displeasing them. There
is no middle course unless you say nothing.
Twenty-four to thirty is now the fashionable
age in London.
The pretty women of New Zealand are
described as great takers, and as rubbing
noses instead of kissing.
A woman at Troy, N. Y. Mrs. Elvlra
Crabb, has taught a little private school for
fifty years. Though now over eighty, and
partially paralyzed, she keeps up her school.
She has taught four generations of one
family.
A lady was one OF the largest winners at
the recent Derby, and ranks high among the
chief patrons and good judges of the turf.
As We are commanded to love ourneighbor
as ourselves, We should see to it that our
neighbor is a charming young woman.
The woman who malries does well, but
the woman who does not marry does better
nine times out of ten.
Lightning seldom strikes twice in the same
place, and a homely woman feels that a
similar law governs question-popping.
A bride of a few weeks duration went to
market the other day, and, seeing some large
gold fish swimming about in q glass globe,
was struck with the idea Of having them for
dinner. 'I'd like those fishes, if you haven't
any smelts,'' she said mildly to the man !; and
when told they were not to eat, but for pets,
she declared it was a shame, for they would
have looked so nice OH her Nankin blue
china.
Miss Sydney Paul Gill, who died last week
in Newark, N. j.. wrote 81 want to be an
angel"
1t would never do to elect women to all
oA,n~. t. p f.,,o)n eJap,G ohoy1I Wait fha
residence of a handsome man and explain to
his jealous wife that she had an attachment
for him, there would be a vacancy in that
office in about two minutes.
Chowder got a good dinner at home a few
days ago by telling his wife that he was going
to bring a Judge home with him to that meal.
When he arrived alone, and Mrs. Chowder
asked him where the Judge was, he triumph
antly pointed to himself, remarking: "l'm a
good judge of a dinner" He will be obliged
to get a dinner in some other way thereafter.
Leap year-She: care you engaged for the
German 2" He with eagerness): No, En-
not. She with Pity Oh, that's too bad
Good evening. See you atsr."-Woman's
Journal.
Lady \engasing Parlor Maid)-"And why
did you leave your last place ~ Candidate
(bridling)-"Whlch | we're considered too
good looking, NUM- visitors was always
takin' me for misses, mum !'-London
Punch.
The style at the moment for English brides
MAIDS is to wear simple white muslin dresses
with o fichu crossed on the bosom, white
p~arasols, and a small basket OF flowers hang
ing on the arm. In one hand a prayer-book.
The waist must be round and gathered to a
belt, and worn with a wide belt of white
Sural silk with sash ends.
A woman who pretends to laugh at love is
like the child who sings at night when he is
afraid.
Rascal That word on the lips of a woman,
addressed to a too daring man, often means-
angel.
To protect ones self against the storms of
passion. marriage with a good woman is a
harbor in the tempest; but with a bad woman
it proves a tempest in the harbor.
For one Orpheus who went to hell to seek
his wife, how many widowers who would not
even go to paradise to find theirs.
The enulnerator. find that advanced bache-
lors are as careful about giving their age as
maiden ladies of similar years. Let not men
henceforth be alone held blameless in this
matter.
Says a philosophic observer: "Nine-tenths
OF the influence eXerted in the world is
Woman'S, the principal acts OF most mems
lives being directly or in directly traceabie to
her training
A married lady in Sherman, Texas, re-
Gently ATTEMPTED to drown herself because her
husband limited her pin money.
One of the census enumerators of McLen-
nan county, Texas, found o widow thirty-fiyo
years old. with a son twents-Seven years OF
age.
A couple were recently married at New
port after a courtshlp of thirty. five years.
Two fashionable and wealthy ladies were
fined S. each in Dubuque, ,Iowa, for taking
flowers from a cemetery.
Men make the laws, women make the Gus
toms.
Bret uarte is HOW a regular contributor I,
three London publications and one or tw.
journals on the Continent.