Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1880-08-20


THE Boy WHOSE MOTHER CUTS His
HAIRY GU can always tell boy whose
mother cuts his hair. Not because the
edges of it look as if it had been chewed
by an absent minded horse, but you tell it
by the way he stops on the street and wrig-
giles his shoulders. When fond mother has
cut her boys hair, she is careful to guard
against any annoyance and muss by laying
sheet on the carpet. 1t has never yet Oc-
Cured to her to set him over bare floor
and put the sheet around his neck. Then
she draws the front hair over his eyes and
leaves it there while she cuts that at the
back. The hair which lies over his eyes
appears to be surcharged with electric
needles, and that which is silently drop
ping down under his shirt band appears to
be on fire. She has unconsciously contin-
ued to push his head forward until his nose
touches his breast and is too busily engag
ed to notice the snuffiing sound that is be-
coming alarmingly frequent. In the mean
time he desires to blow his nose, but rec
elects that his handkerchief is in the 9th
er room. Then fly lights on his nose and
does it SO Unexpectedly that he involunta-
rily lodges and catches the point of the
scissors in his ear. AT this he commences
to cry and wish he was a man. But his
mother doesn't notice BIN. She merely
hits him on the other ear, to inspire him
with confidence, and goes on with the
work. When she is through she holds his
1,oo l> 4 nit
her mouth blows the short bits Of hair
from the top of his head down his back
He calls her attention to the fact, but she
looks for new place on his head, and hits
him there, and asks him why he didn't
use hinhandkerchief. Then he takes his
awfully disfgured head to the mirror and
looks at it, and young as he is, shudders
as he thinks Of what the boys on the street
will say.
PINS AND A WoMAN,s DREss.-Our
wife wants a new dress. After two or
three or half dozen stores have been ran
sacked for the goods the drassmaker is
sought out The matter of measurement
is tedious, and then the matter of fitting
is one Of numerous and repeated trials.
Finally the dress is finished and sent home.
Then it is sent back to be taken in here
and let out there, and at last after the
customer has been fitted more times for
that one dress than her husband has been
measured in three or four years, the dress
comes home for the last time, and is pro
nounced by the wearer, her friends and
the dressmaker as beautiful and perfect
fit, and it is finished.
Beautiful it certainly is. far more beau
tiful than anything her husband ever
wears. Colors and material, style, blend
ing shades and contrasting bits of color,
are all in the perfection of good taste. NJ
man can improve upon that. But, it isn't
finished. When it is completed as far as
the skill of the dressmaker can finish it
and it is put on, it has to be pinned some
where; sometimes in two or three. often
in half dozen places. 1t always re-
quires pin. Leave out the pin and the
dress is all awry somewhere. On all this
broad continent there is not one Ameri-
can woman who can dress SO as to make |
any kind of appearance in good society
without pins.
Now, suppose our tailor should send our
suit home and when we had put on the |
coat we had to pin it at the neck? Or
suppose there was no suspender buttons
aft, and we had to use pins there? Sup
pose he made our shirts 80 that we would |
have to pin the collar, how long would |
such a shirt or such a suit Of clothes stay |
in the house? Who would be responsible |
for the language used by the man who had |
to pin his coat? No tailor would SO tempt |
the wrath of an independent man. But |
woman-alas she patiently pins on the
dress that she paid some one $50 or $40 to
make. and doesn't think anything about
it. We will not pursue this painful sub
ject. Let the women of America take it
up and think about it and learn, in the
noble Independence of womanhood, to
make their clothes before they put them
on.
GIRLS FIsHIMa.-The following is an
accurate report:
ooh, see one ~
"Where ?"
vi. my, 50 Ut Is =
LET s catch him ~
'Who's got the bait ?"
''You lazy thing, you're sitting on my
pole -
''Oh, something's got my hook ?''
s'Pull up, you little idiot ~
''Oh, murderI take it away! Ugh! take
it way, the nasty thing!'
'sHow will it ever get off ?''
ssAint it pretty ?''
wonder if it amt dry ?"
'.Poor little thing, let's pat it back
again 20
.:How will it get the hook from its
mouth 20
ssJob printing 20 exclaimed an old lady,
The other day, as she peeped over her
|