, 1880-06-20
HllM0R.

Why don't they haze an examination In eofor.
blindness ut West Point?-Phladelphia Bu1ctin.
Well, now, the question is, Will West po,nt
cadet lie. or won't he? 1t Is generally fearr,;
| that he W-.-HuEktUs.
Tho Boston Commercial Bulletin informs M
that the k11g OF Oilymargarfue-Georve ~
| (irccce-is visiting Paris.
A Frcnd-No, we are not going to Europe this
summer. Our congregation eannot aNo1I it.-
| Ntlu lort Commercial Adrcrtiser-
There are three men in jail at Ozark, Ark.
! charged with murder: The remarkable thing
about this case Is that the nen are in jail.-D&s-
] ton Post.
So many Of Lorfllanl's horses have bern
| scratched in England that one is led to thins
they have been running tor odice.-New O7ls1ns
J PicGui1'c-
Bob 1ngersoll, after all, is not quite an atheist
| He believes In the efficacy OF the red flannel
/ shuw1 upon an audience Of taurfne emotions
Nssu York TslcoTun. @''Al''"
| A line In d Welsh poem reads: "Mi ganaf.
chwi ganu mn fy rwyth Pete We advise Pete
| to do nothing OF the kind It would be iniutti-
| cious--NorsistoEn HeruM-
...Yes, Elfrtda," says the Hapksye tearfllly,
t.this is a world of 1ransitury' things. Eyeryss
thing. changes in this world, except the circus
[ and Mary Anderson'a age.
The man who has nothing to DO can make
fortune by bunting crows The demand far thf9
class OF meat will be enormous during the pexr
| few days.-PhIut<{phia Chronicle Herald.
The Chicago hotcl-cie looks at the papers
| haetily in the morning. and, not seeing any no.
tce OF bis scurfpip, believes that the dark horse
will be the eandidate.-Nen Tork Herald. '''''
"Ilike hot weather best" said philatlelphia
girl because 1t makes pa and ina SO sleepy has
they don't come bothering around the parIor
the nights have male company.'' Fhlat<phig
Chronicle He1rAd-
names they collect and several men have de-
clincd tho Job IN the town where 4Alyarado Duon-
compngni and IIjg,,lmar zahrieskowatschiyer
rcside.-Boston Post.
Mark Twain, speaking of new mozqulto-net-
ting, writes: 1.-THE day is coming when We shall
sit under our nets III church aud slun1her peace-
fully, while the discounted files club tos,ether
and take it out OF the minister
Mr. Iiden's strength is 90 wonderful that. the
other day, when he suddenly shut his teeth
down on o crust Of bread. q piece tlew l50 feet
into the air, and descending, stuashetl q teie.
grAph-pOle to atoms.-Sdn Fruncisco NtEs-L<t-
ter.
Barnum has sworn his circus Is worth ou,y
SGO0U0, but even that IS good price. We've
seen oircuses that weren't worth two cents. Be-
sides, you must bear IL mind that Rasnrm was
laborinG under the excitement Of talking to
tar ctiiectOr.-BOsfoH FuSf.
The shooting gallery men are doing poor
business. They might work up lttle trade ut
five cents throw II they would pu: up stuffed
cat on practicab1e garden,Man and allow Gus
toners to throw bocr.1acks at tho oReudtus
object.-NcW Orleans P{guyune.
'sPhi1adclphia is happy" says Puck, because
ssthe eyes Of the world have been Tn her for
week and sho has beaten New York In having
rliiroad-crash.'' Dressing fn crash, an1 having
the eyes Of the world on her while she Aisz3.
The dizzy jade.-Oa City Derrick.
4 gang of burglars were q bursl;ug at Long
Island the other day, and they stole set Of ap
commeudable thirst for Knowledge among Til
class Of night workers thar has hitherto heea
nnsuspected- No doubt these cracksmeu cams
Isn't ourgling. he likes to lie a basking in tbs
sun, with the Cyciopedia volumes him euclrclfns.
to read the books ail over one by one-Dstrva
Free Press.
And now the Oilymar2nrine- manufacturers
have taken the wind out Of the sails uf thei1
prosecutors py grarely announcing that here.
after they will prosecute to tho full extent Of
the law all limitations Of the cu1or and appear
auce Of their wares by the constructors OF or1l-
nary boarding house, butter. This ts Us 1t
should be, and It looks now rs though tho pa.
tIcnt, down-trodden hash-ehewgr Of the tolla3
masses was ut last sure OF some protection
San Ffnnci$c0 Post
a sculptor's wife had her husband arrested IN
Cincinnati the other day fur assault and battery,
because rs ns she testified: On ths occasion of her
an across tie way hnd clipped. he struck ner in
the face With huge mass Of mud. The sculptor
tnas tue Ss a to ws ths
on his wifc's face, aud therefore he hn5tened to
take q clay cast OF her features. SO rs to catch
the expression for use On \ bust he intended to
model. The court dismissed the case.-Sun
Fr11lctsco Post
They hive struck 1t in Pnrjs! Tho Petit Jour
nal pour Rife announces: .....-
"TO OUR SUBSCRIBERS!
"TnE TEASE!
4 new game, replacing with advantage all
the games Of patience known up tp present. Il
day. He himself compuscs of IL little cxchc1uer
Of sixteen pawus nuulbercds; which themselves
lend to some contributions without end. one
Gun read, in the New York Herald, that SINE
bets importanrs are engaged GU the solution OF
such situation ylven- All recently yet, tho
to this-him who will find the solution mathe-
matte Of this game strongly attaching
s. We are in measure to mike to profit or
subscribers Of this Novelty. To SEND u ccn
times in stau,ps-posts To the bureau of the Laa*
Journal fOrt0-lduUh for 1t to receive }funco ta
France"