The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1880-08-26
A Romantic Situation.


Miss Angelina Apem went rusticating
last summer with her ma. They found
board at pleasant country homestead,
where there was already quite party.
Miss Apem desired to make herself
generally agreeable and decided TO cul-
tivate the acquaintance of the grand
mother of the household on the very
first evening after her arrival. Ac-
cordingly, after tea, when the boarders
had assembled on the porch to enjoy
cool breeze, Miss Apem opened on the
grandmother, who was busy with her
knitting.
"Ihis is a very romantic situation,
said the young lady, addressing the ven
cradle dame.
The latter looked at her inquiringly.
"This is a very romantic situation"
repeated the young lady IN her sweetest
tones and little louder.
The old lady said: " | am little hard
of hearing; please speak louder"
s'This is a very romantic situation, :"
again repeated Miss Apem, in higher
key, coloring slightly and looking a lit
tie embarrassed when she saw that she
was attracting the attention OF the as
sembly.
The old lady now looked thoroughly
puzzled and said: "a leetle louder,
miss"
The young lady Redeemed visibly.
Three gentlemen were looking at her
with q quizical expression and four
ladies were taking in the situation with
an evident relish. Miss Apem gathered
herself for the final struggle, and con-
centrating all her power of speech she
sAouted: This is a very romantic stu
auion."
Three elderly gentlemen jumped so
suddenly as TO throw their eyeglasses
from their noses. A crOquet party came
running around the house to see what
was the matter. The house dog thought
an army of tramps had invaded the
premises and ran toward the gate,
barking savagely. The man of the
house thought the fish-peddler had ar
rived on his weekly visit and yelled:
-Four pounds of white fish, three OF
trout and five of bull-heads." A man
from town, who was passing in buggy,
thinking some one had asked him about
the news of the city, replied, Nothing
new"
Miss Apem's situation by this time
was anything but romantic. She was
blushing like a red, red rose, and the
perspiration had started from her fore
head in such profusion as TO take the
crinkle and frizz all out of her hair.
Her pleasant smile had given away to 8
look ofpained expectation. She watched
Al, y L. III hn al
hear this time? Would she answer!
Must Miss Apem again yell at her!
These were the questions that chased
each other through her throbbing brain
1t was critical moment. 1t seemed
ages to Miss Apem. All the acts o
her life came crOwding up before her
She was about to speak, Miss Apen
listens.
"Wall, l don't know about it's bein
very rheumatic about here. Ihave liveC
here nigh onto seventy year, an nevel
had tech of pain of any kind, excep
once when the brindle heifer kicked m'
in the shin as | was milkin' on 'er.
tied her tail around her hind leg K
keep her from whiskin' on it into M
face. She got mad because she coulC
not WUlSh utI bdl anu up anu hiOfNC'
like all creation. / rubbed arniky oil
the shin and 1 was all right in day o
two. But Jim Shaw, who lives over OF
the cross road, he has complained o
rheumatic a good many year off and on
1t catches him in his back and in hi
knee Jints and makes 'em stiff some
times. Do We ever have the rheuma
tiz?'
By the time the old lady had finishes
Miss Apem had tainted dead away, AM
had to be carried to her room. Th
shock to her nervous system was to-
great. The old lady looked somewha
surprised, but retained her presence O
mind, and shouted to persons who wer
assisting Miss Apem:
" If she has got the rheumatic ba
come and get my bottle of arniky. -
Rome IN. Y. Sentinel.