Claiborne guardian. [volume] (Homer, La.) 1877-188?, 1880-04-21

and I'll back her today fur . shot.
bag full O. dust in q squar fight with
any auimile tibet runs the hills.
Thet's Mag. Dawson, up one side
and down t'other. She's q woman,
though, aud, l reckon, jist like all
the rest O. the petticost brigade,
and when Tom, son o my nearest
neighbor, began to hang round the
cabin and act like q thoroughbred
fool, / knowed jist how it'd all pan
out. The young idiots bev unaner.
mously resOlutioned to double up
and economic in bed .clothes, and
they've sent me down var to chase
up q law sharp to yoke 'em up.
Bust the luck, hev l got to ride olar
to Leadville tur q Jesticer
1t really looked that way, and
many expressions Of coincidence
were rendered to the old man, who
told the 'mixologist' behind the bar
to set 'em up agin.' After drink
ing, one Of the boys asked:
Don't preachers marry folks
back in the States!"
Que. eyed johnson replied that in
his youth he had attended numer-
Gus weddings, and they had always
been engineered by ministers.
"Then, why in thunder amt a
gospel. grinder as good fur the rack.
ct out here as o Jesticei If Faro
Bill can't rattle through little jam.
boree o tibet natur, nobody kin; you
hear mef"
The idea was happy one, and
Bill was Immediately sent for, when
he was introduced to Dawson, the
old man shook him warmly BY the
hand, and said:
"Pard, l want you to come over
TO Rattlesnake and marry my dar.
ter"
Faro Bill looked foolish, turned
red. and then vehemently replied:
"NO ye don't, old man. You can't
cap me inter any SIGH snide game
as that in daylight. amt on
the marry, and wouldn't hook onto
the best woman that ever made
a track in the ground. Swim out
now and dry yeself, and don't try
to stear an old gam in a new
gamer
The crowd fairly roared, much to
Bills discontinue. When the
laughter had been suppressed suffi.
ciently to allow him to speak, Sam
said:
"Oh, pard, let's 20 and take a
tumble, won't yeri You don't catch
onto me at all. The boys hyar hev
put you up to me as gospel preach
er, and as sich, l want you to git a
boss and 60 over hum with me and
yoke my darter Mag and Tom Par.
ker, accordin' to the rules of matri'
mony. DO you drop on the little
trick nowT
q cit thar now, old man. Pm
dead onto yOu-but this is kinder
outer bizness, fur l never spliced a
couple in my life. If you felt the
need of heavenly consolation and
wanted some preachin done, ! could
60 over and sling you Twin word,
till yer can't rest, aud can grind out
as hefty a single handed prayer as
ye'd want to hear, but rs fur I'M.
dertakin to manufacture q family
I'm feard I'll play a losin hand. |
guess you'd better let tibet job out
to some one that saveys the biz,
old man. for ! beg tn Ut eXcnsed.'
But the old man would take no
denial, aud assisted by the crowd,
he urged the matter 50 persistently
that Bill finally yielded, and pro.
missed to perform the ceremony.
True, he was not III ordained min.
lister, but no one in the mountains
would ever question the legality OF
the marriage. Dawson informed
the preacher that u license had al
ready been procured from the cOun
ty seat, and was then in the hands
OF the prospective son.in.law. Eve
rything having been satisfactorily
arranged, Sam said:
And now, boys, l hereby extend
to all an invite to 60 over aud stan
in with us on the hOO.dOO. Tbar's
plenty O good liquor thar, and lots
O grub. I've hired a fiddler. and
we're goin to have the smashinesl
dance the world ever heerd on. It's
fourteen miles over thar, on q plain
trail, and l want every cuss in the
camp tibet kin borrow, hire or stea
q boss to fall into the procession
aud cum along. Thars q brigade
o. families a cummin up from dowr