davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
, 1880-08-18
IMPORTING FINE HORSES.
4 1Scccnt Movement 10 Secure Strong
Draft IEorxrH In Asnorlcn.

Nt,r Turk Tribune, Auy. H.
Tho steamer Greece, which arrived Inst
week, brought nIncty-soy1n horses Of the
1'crul.or0u brcol for N. ". Dnnl,nn,. M iu.-
porter Of horses, who lives ut Wayne, Du
l'age County, III. This Is II s,nnll viIagu
about thirty miles west Of Chicago. Tho
horses were taken to stables oil Greenwich
street, and afterward seut West 10 Mr. Dun
ln,n's stock farm nj, Wnynu. About oMc-
fourth Of them nro colts, AlMl tho rest .nro
fm!l-grown stations, their Weights ranging
from l,s00 10 1000 pounds. This Is tho ]nrR
est importation OF lnrses Of this kind ever
nude into tlis country. Mr.. Durham salA
to IL IIlbnnc reporter, willie speaking Of the
Importation Ut horses:
"WillIam 1lnrrls, Of Moorest9wn, MI,
brought the .lrst l'urcharon stallf9ls to tltls
ior lis healtll and say son'o Of tllcse !.or$ss
Ut work in France. lie wns 70 strtlck, With
some Of them home will hin. Accordingly
h. l sl''psF for to this enuntry 1na rw% of
Atonrestnwn. Charles Full!ngton, Ut Ohio.
imported tho next lot in ix,l. III lxAonc Of tho
stations imported by NJ. Fn!!inGton was
Ssn s o + S S so We5S " Se h tr !Tsys u .Ss % yats h
1Stis Imported two of tllese ,StallIons, md il,
Since tint; ;ti.no III l'ayn M ~ hrot,E!t ,tycr frnn,
tfeflGo DctWeHn :n1 htltL nv q! lh1lll. l NIL
them NJ, my stock-fnr'n nt Wayne alH! sell
ttle,n Whenever NIL opportunity; ncc.,s.n,
:, "llnw !9rso rsgion Is Perclle' wllerb yo''
aIho district Wl,Icl. goes by ths nm nane [ of
I.uira Rivers, nb0nt 1H1 miles from l'nrts.
'rllU plntenu Ii ssixty mile! III length md forty
miles IN width, mud einbracIss parts Of tlM
DISTRICTS Elr0.et-E.Uir, Eurc, md ORIG, The
sclinlate of tho gnuntry IL sonething, !lkn TINT
nf Vermont. Tho people liyH eiitirnly by
agriculture md BY ralstng. tlcso, horses.
md ccononty. lily dealings With them .fur.
a n H "st % Es ayc a,, G tSsn' @ ysFy ysTy rp py3
nj tMrgutnlng."
Ilnw often tlo you visit Franle0?'
' Every yogr: a!winys, VIZ 70 tl'GtG tl''!t'ns !s:
greater lart U( lilo farm wnrk Is dnl,o then.
hid tIlo l,urscs nr0 cM,pcr t,nu Mt any 0tl,ur
time of tho yenr. Thou, August Is il gttMl
,nomtl, 10 bring tho horses ever to this cnlli-
IT. Try y S G sess scX stt!yi Ssttss Il Yss rsssss S
!lure Just before the caol Wsntlar. All tho
'orStronycrs ~ to l'arcn ~ I'irl!lE Thy mouths
"t !nno nlMl JMiy, an.! tMo rsE!o,. Is pretty
ware II l'crehe to-laY yntt would llAy,,, tinr'l
work to ttn!i yoHlig ilrst-c'nss stallion III
"What DO tiies,! stallions cost thoro9"
ttcnl 10 Import tile,li. lad II speelal traln
from .rarcl,s 10 Tho sea-cuust, \ th!ng mover
S5Oj for every ll0rso ! brought ucross lilo
9cens.. Nnw. however, when | hrIng ttol,I II,
larK9 Numbers 1t eosts only little ,iioru I'M,
halfhs l,l.tcll for each. 1t Will cost no 800
Acar f2r NY special ttn!n to Hnyne. put
| when lstnrt, alul hnyo 10 pay 1 or i per
:asat a,l tho insurance. You seM tllera nro
lNrge risks III this business. Wllan ! sell
tl!ess stuI!lni!s, howayer. ,will Kot from
| 81, 500 t0 $4,000 e,lcIl f0r t!sonl."
, 1880-08-18
Two Cann.ltaus Propose to Shoot tl.c
Whirlpool Rapids III NIL Open lEOnl
for IL Considerations

Slupv..sAah ilr4st JouF,lt'
Tho i.lel Df successfully making II trip frotn
NlnXurn Falta tu tAG AIDntt. III tho klngurA
l!lser ~, Lake U1tur!o+ Y0ttng through tllt ter
RHO rnn!ds Mnsi whir'pH'l. Thtru hut ope btMt.
lo,Isly plss, IL now tkiliy u tanE[llo sApe. sir.
saul nilvts owner Of must Of tho 9rnt NsaHura
rrsdfnly done: x Yontle,nuh qt Cliftoll, accola-
panied BY frienl, both experienced yi,ortsrlnt,,
nuthorIzta tho wciluii IS!t1rf.i4. to nuke tho
following propuaitton; "I'hAt u Mr.. l)ayis
will dopnsit $1,OO0, to be uaid tl0n for Il
SM.!!ccHssfu! TIN y, uni, ",.en bout; from
Nis tSx Esls f. tue t,to noSth Or ino MeTat,
1t. And fivthesl..orc. f. slr; Davis Will deposit
unuthor Il, l,lnl, thoy viii ngrpe Ia return by the
saru ru,itt, without tuktn{s th,lr boat nt OE tho
water" Tho gentlemen ,nnklnx this proposal aro
MT. l.. II, seEoAcld, la,o H4As4n OF lbo Fourth
, 1880-08-18

ITO f1:ST-l'rrEt. FLAT UE. HOUSE IN vFllY
Wind, suitable Tor i!ght hnnsakun!,,R, E9nilc'lnn
mth; vii 10 mrtsa1iy nsnsc r.! .ate rrnt. Il
tie*lrG lsotsfunces ra1ureG. Arpy nt u pnrk.nv.,
1utFIt.stnftF
, 1880-08-18
SOUTHERN ILLINOIS.

enfatA Soh.rfe.sfohal suHtrAct-G GAPt.
o,,". ynr 1r; Gsra;',i, ',orifx Of WI" Election" '
10 The Editor n 77.s Chicago tribune.
T,sc;Sryy,1,1n. H., Aur. 1I.-.rha grand
r,,w a. ~" 0nni,, m t,,a mi, ,,it in 1n,,,re.
'on @ viii ii III ts sS c"nessiol m s @ consetIon a II i a"!
It's work, pruyou Il splendid triumph for tito
Of t,,e Eighteenth District. 1t
r,va ,,rw tmnrtns nuI enthusiasm ia TIM
an,, @ nnH ~" of the % m"rv III ovrr t,,c m ,lis. M
trict. ltcstabl'std confidence, unity, energy,
n,NI opel,rss Of nl}rl,bsa nnlONl, nil classes Of
,,evuhlicuns. The Organization, of tho porty
far circetiye cnmpairll services Il, tho
Inherent cnh'hlcs ol lno alstfsct Wofe
never bcfnrn In 80 perfect antl
thorough working order. Tl!erc Is III, lngglng
behind. yu,ly1nurinr, md co,nn1atniug II, tl,o
M"iRt 1"'se WIN Me." 'n'sappo.lleu III
their choice n1 caMlltlhtes nave 1otEh1lch
their dtsappoirttnrnts, In view Of thu great
un.l threatening dangers that menace orr III
...".' a, 's'". .,o W., .'ss,.,,. 10y
tio work OIL ORGANIZATION AMI preparation MOI
only to sweep tho district with grcatcr ,na-
jorlty tlan eyer before, hut to cnrry the co,ln-
Ill., ~ vo, ~ ~" "a,t ~ Wv I', !, ;s
ING Iceioh'siihtloh ot Cnp1. Jo'l' IL. Iho'has
tn be his own successor III the next Congress
was wise an.l timely moyr In the right d.
rection. Ills pintn, straightforward, consist
cut course during his ptrsent term, together
viii Tie advantages ot tic experience wlliel,
lr huI rtueiyctI, Impressed our ucUplo
ninsk fnyornbly in iis Interest. A yulini.
iuall will energy and ahiiity. viii, n,amy of
tl'u elements u n ,sllceessfi,l lMrty;;lea;ler,
Cap.. Ti'ons Ind tila. confidence of III who
nr;nw n f"r his l,ob;s ,,,.tI sc,crjv rnrt,r ~ nm my
ovrr vi,n Of SOutGsrn illinois, adjust lenders
nml defenders Of iflo Unnlocr,,tIr JnitII. tl,o
Ii0,. ". j. Alien, wis tic occesion ri iu,cl
str,nnth nfnl iniitIrurt,it lin viii. MIR ,urtv
wi,uso WNicct WIS TO cvu,imuv t'o @ grrnit.sk ]
ll,,luhnr II tic elements Of SUCCESS in illelr
rnndi'In,~ ns wa rrntSr,l ti'nt tlIr ~, "n,tost
wnNl In n i,urti md cloSe t,,,., ,vnr his .iis.
trlct. jiis renon,iiatis,l,, as line md cire,-
Fl" lint ro,,,I hnyn' H, t.rn ~ ,n,Ir p';T ~
@ tha n,,rtv uTs Il has imc,1 m.,st sntisfocto1r
,,mjfii ni ,nr,nonizm, Ti' nii ti,, s..n'j"uiy,
iiS ,iis.SSrnt nh @ ~lnmI,ts M" mron,isI,s NJ. 3 ,nIinr
ui",t ~ III. ,ia1N,1,,, nn' III H. TUE, ,'ni1,t
folL ot !s tIa GIG1t, ,'. n.!.s ~ atSu 1s ,3
js Hinaton % wv W. ',sorrn;zI .tr' ~ thc IL o, no.
,stsmticir fn,,vnSt 4y,itI; ,nct ~ tu ~, ut tt,c
, 1880-08-18

Every -Enpnnucr will welcome Tho
pl,nkcrs' sntsnI,nrlln M MI pst friend, tn whom
1te or annU OilG nr his snly Is indebted iGr help
through tho crtlct periods nj sickness md de-
1tv fitrt t,0niH Ia Gyprtt NtlP.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

THEIR AGEs.-Blaine touched so on the
last of January. Grant was 81 last April.
Sherman was Sc last May. Washburne was
63 in September. Conkling was 30 in Oc-
tober. Garfield is in his 49th year. Bay
ard was 81 in October. Thurman reached
his Goth birthday in November, Hendricks
was so in September. Tilden will be sc
this February, and in the same month Gen
eral Hancock will be 55. Seymour will be
70 in May. Washington was in his 57th
year when he was first elected, and had just
entered his Goth year when he left Office.
John Adams was 81 when he was elected,
jefferson 81, Madison in his 5Sth year,
Monroe in his 59th, and John Quincy Adams
in his 5Sth. jackson was 81 when chosen
the first time, and therefore 65 when re-,
elected, while he reached his 10th year when
he quilted office. Van Buren was 81 and
Harrison 81 when they were elected, while
Taylor when he took Office had just passed
his 51st birthday. Polk was elected on
almost precisely his 49th birthday. Taylor
was not quite 30 when elected, and Fillmore
was in his 51st year when he succeeded him.
Pierce had not yet completed his 48th year
when he was elected, and he was the junior
of all who have taken the presidential chair,
except General Grant. Mr.. Buchanan was
elected in his Goth year, Lincoln in his SD
and Sc, while johnson succeeded in his 57th.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

A HORSE Kicks GOLD OUT OF Rock
A gold mine that would make the eyes OF
the Rothchilds turn green with envy was
discovered near Sonora, California, on Sum-
day of last week. The discovery was made
in most singular manner, and, of all per-
sons in the world, by an actor, who when
handling his 'brief abstracts and chronicle
of the times" generally has to deal with
gloss rather than gold. The actor, Snow by
name, and popular in San Francisco as a
minstrel man, accompanied DR.. Drake, OF
Sonora, on the propitious Sunday afternoon
in horseback ride towards Spring Gulch.
DIS. Drake lost Snow along the trail, and
the latter was left to wander around at his
horse's will. 1t happened that in riding
along slippery bank the horse fell, horse,
rider and rifle going precipitately down the
bluff at an angle of forty five degrees until
they brought up against mass of stone,
the top Of which stood out of the snow.
The prospector was not hurt, as the cold,
soft cushion had saved his bones from the
hard ground beneath. Scrambling up
against the rock he observed that it was a
quartz lode, and that where the horse had
accidentally kicked off the moss something
glittered. He forgot his bruises in the well
come sight and set about further examina-
ton. He broke off several specimens, which
proved to be three-quarters gold. Layer
after layer of moss was removed. until a
vein thirty feet thick was revealed. Snow
returned to Sonora and has since taken
steps to secure his bonanza.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

A FEW PUNs -Punning, says the New
Orleans Picayuns, would not be so bad were
it not so infectious. Puns leave gems which
lie in idle minds till they fructify and bear
baleful crop of more puns. The other
day some of us got to talking about that
witty old cynic, Dean Swift, when one of
the company took advantage of the opening
and gave us this .jeu de mot of his: "Why, "
asked the Dean, sis it right, by the lex tai
ionis, to pick an artists pocket?" 1t was
given up, of course, and the answer was,
because he has pictures" A silence fell
about the table round until, one by one, we
saw it. Then one thoughtful man observed,
sIt was impossible to give the answer-be-
cause the Dean had contrived to reserve the
answer to himself. could not for instance
say that it is right for me to pick an artists
pocket, because he has picked yours" Here
is another conundrum, founded upon pun
which only the propounder can solve: An
old man and young one were standing by
meadow. "Why," asked the young man,
sis this clover older than you?" 'It is
not, replied the other. sit is, though, -
returned the young man, ''because it is pas
turage." Thereupon an abstracted looking
person, who had not followed the line of re-
mark, and who had not understood the il
lustration, startled us all with this irrele
want inquiry: "Why cannot pantomimist
tickle nine Esquimaux? Give it up? Why,
it's because he can gesticulate."
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

To AVOID DISEASED FowLs.-Procure
one pound of wood charcoal, pulverize it
coarsely, and mix with it half a pound of
common table salt. To half pint of this
mixture, add one quart of corn meal and
bran, half and half. Mix well and feed to
abou. six or seven fowls. Procure some
hard coal screenings and place within reach.
Feed occasionally few oats. Always keep
some old iron in the drinking water; give
all the out door exercise you possibly can,
even chase them round little. Place
plenty of straw for them to scratch among
for exercise. Throw some small grain
among this to encourage scratching. Above
all, give pure air and keep perfectly clean.
find little kerosene-the commoner the
better-to be finer preventive of disease
and lice of all kiuds. Smear this all along
the perches; also under the straw in the
laying boxes. This is disinfectant and
deodorizer also. On cold days be careful;
on warm ones give them air. Wm. Horne,
2. s.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11
A WOMAN DEFIES THE MORMON
CHURCH.

/ have knowledge of particular instance
where a woman defed the whole Mormon
church, which would have been fatal to her
but for the protection of Brigham Young,
who had purpose in defending her. This
was the case of Sara Alexander, the hand.
soonest woman that ever walked in Utah.
Sara Alexander was Mormon's child and
grew up among the Mormons. She did not
like the institution and had no hesitation in
saying go. She possessed great dramatic
talent, and being very beautiful, she re-
solved to adopt the stage for profession.
/ remember we'll the night of her debut at
Brigham Young's theatre. 1t was late in
the fall of 1868. TIE play was Marriage
at any Price," and Miss Alexander played
the part of "Matilda Peppercon." She sue
ceeded entirely, and half dozen Mormon
elders went wild over her charms, and she
at once became the object of the most un-
heard of prosecutions. She was forcibly
taken by prominent Mormon to his resi-
dence, and an appeal by her father to Brig
ham Young was all that saved her. It was
then that the idea struck the prophet that
as Miss Alexander had very profitable fu-
ture before her, it would be wise thing to
make her the wife of the profigate son, Jos.
A., who would then have her purse to 1e.
pend upon, and the exchequer of the father
would be the gamer. But Miss Alexander
refused to enter into the bargain. Brigham
then told her that she must marry his son,
and to make preparations at once. She was
placed in quarters near the prophets resi-
dence, but she managed not only to escape
from her improvised prison, but to reach
San Francisco. She was closely followed,
however, by Joseph A. Young and three
other Mormons. They reached San Fran
cisco on the night previous to that on which
she was advertised to appear at theatre in
that city she having applied for and obtain
ed an engagement. The papers announced
the arrival of Young, and Miss Alexander
was afraid to appear. Giving her reason,
however, the Mormon emissaries were served
with notice that it would be best for them
to quit San Francisco, which they lost no
time in doing. Joseph A. Young has since
died, but do not know what ever became
of the beautiful Sara Alexandria, inter
view with an ex- Mormon Woman, in Ne,c
York Times.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

THE HoRsE's LEG.-The indications of
a good leg are frmness, hardness, and
smoothness to the touch, showing an entire
absence Of fadipose tissue; large, well defined
joints, entirely free from abnormal append
ages; firm, but elastic cords, short pastern,
short from knee and hook to pastern joint.
The shape of the bone should be broad and
fiat, and the legs should stand squarely and
firmly under the horse, the toes turning
neither in nor out. The bone should be of
good size just below the knee, and fiat; but
large-sized cannon bones, with strong, clean
back sinews and suspensory ligament are of
great Importance. "Curby hocks, - ''cow
hocks," s'bowed legs" ''calf knees" and
ssover on the knees" are indications that
are always unfavorable.-LsOe Stock Jour-
nal.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

Welded LovE-A TRUE INClDENT.-
"Make the bed easy, Mr.. B., said Old Uncle
Abe to the undertaken, who was preparing
the coffin for his aged wife. "Make the
bed soft and easy, for her old bones are
tender and hard bed will hurt them"
He forgot for moment-that old, gray
haired man-that she was dead; that the old
bones had done aching forever. Sixty-fou
years had she walked by his side, a true and
loving wife. Sixty four years! just think
of it in this age of divorce. Sixty-fou years
had they dwelt under the same sorrows of
life; together mourned over the coffin of
their first born; together rejoiced in the
prosperity of their sons and daughters, and
now she ha S left him alone. No wonder he
forgot. Her loving hands had so long cared
for him, for he had been the feebler of the
two. 'Until death do part u.s." said the
marriage service that had united them so
many years ago. Death had parted them,
but the love still survived. Tenderly had he
cared for her all these years, and now ten
derly did he watch the making of the last
bed of this still loved wife. He had bravely
breasted the storm of life with her by his
side, but now that she was gone he could
not live, and in few days they laid him by
her side. IN. o. PscayIase.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

Coz MEAL.-Dr. ]. R. Nichols says one
bushel, or 100 pounds of corn cob meal
made from our best Northern corn, is as
valuable for stock feeding as one bushel or
100 pounds of whole corn meal from the Or
binary Southern and Western grain, as
found in the markets. The variety of cob
meal experimental with, was that which
came from what is known as the BoarIman
corn, eight-rowed with small cob. The pro-
portion of corn and cob, when perfectly sea-
soned, was ten to two; 10 pounds Of ears
giving two pounds Of cob. It is important
in manufacturing corn cob meal that it be
ground very fine, in order that it be digest
ed thoroughly.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

How TO GRAFT GRAPEvINEs-Tho
who wish to graft their vines with other
vines should remember that Winter and not
Spring is the time for it-and in this the
grape is different from most other trees.
How to graft grapevines admits of many
various replies. The best is probably that
described years ago in our pages by Samuel
Miller, then of Lebanon, in this State, now
of Missouri, who was very successful as a
CRATER of the grape. He drew away the
soil from the stock to be grated, cut it
down about two inches from the surface,
then cut with stout sharp knife long
and narrow wedge shape notch in the stock,
and shaped the scion as a wedge to fit in the
notch in the stock. The lips of the notch
are then tied together and the earth drawn
in around the whole, leaving the upper eye
of the graft above the ground German
tosoaa Telegraph.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

A bold, bad burglar recently broke into
the house of an editor in the watches OF the
night. The editor awakened and questioned
the intruder: ssWhat do you want here9
What look you for2'' "Money," said the
burglar gruf1y." ''Hold on a minute, !"
ouoth the editor, s'and will help you.
I've been looking, myself, for ten years,
perhaps, the two of us may have better
luck" Then was the burglar much dis.
gusted, but the editor called it joke, and
insisted that the burglar ought to set 'em
up.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

| The human heart is a strange affair, to
say the least of it. Had any one advised
Mr.. Popkins to marry Sallie, he would have
rejected the idea Immediately, and she her.
self would have taken it as an insult; but
the totally unexpected manner in which the
matter had been brought up made altogether
different affair of it. He stole glance at
Miss Sallie. Her face was turned away and
she was apparently studying nature. She
was pretty, Mr.. Popkins couldn't deny that.
What if-and his heart gave tremendous
bound. What fool he had been all this
time! We must try, at any rate, and risk
repulse. So, without any more hesitation,
for our hero was brave, he took Uncle Ben's
seat, and said quickly.
"Miss Sallie."
The face turned the eighteenth part of an
inch toward him. Not much encourage
ment, certainly, but little.
''Miss Sallie," he repeated, s'Ive been
fool and brute"
Oh, wise Mr.. Popkins! he had started on
the direct route to woman's heart. Either
from contrariness or sense of justice they
always take the opposite side. Miss Sallie
made up her mind from this moment that he
was gentleman and a Solomon, and she
turned her face completely round for him to
admire.
''Do you think" he continued, ''that we
can settle this lawsuit in the sensible man.
ner suggested by Uncle Ben? dolove you,
Miss Sallie, and by George believe loved
you all the time, and never knew it till to-
day."
Miss Sallie was completely vanquished,
but the answer, although whispered, was
heard above the noise of the wheels and the
cracking of the drivers whip.
The suit of Popkins VS.. Hopkins was dis
missed that day. The Baptist minister
got fee, and the people are firmly con-
vinced that Mr.. and Mrs. Popkins are the
best hands in the world to keep secret.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

A new development has been impaired to
the advertising art by an astute Berlin
tradesman named Niche, who has hit upon
the happy expedient of combining announce
ments of family events, fraught with thrill
ing domestic interest, with ardent and
tempting recommendations Of salable wares.
His latest appeal to the public Of the Ger
man capital runs as follows: "Twins are
come to me for the third time. This time
boy and girl. entreat my friends and
patrons to support me stoutly. Excellent
butter, we'll worth it's price. Similarly,
sausage and cheese. Berlin, . Feb; Miche."
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

Connecticut has a burglar who broke into
the penitentiary, as if not satisfied with
spending twenty-five years there already.
They usually give the convicts a pair of
shoes when discharged at the end Of the
term, but they didn't give this fellow any
shoes, SO he broke in. But he was caught
and is now once more in Jail.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

The SULTAN's PERSONAL EXPENSES
Respecting the Sultan of Turkey, who may
be said to keep Europe in perpetual state
of Turkish bath, some interesting statistics
have been published. Abdul Hamid's ia.
vorite residence, the Yildiz Kiosk, is de-
Tended by thirty guns and garrisoned by
8, 900 soldiers. Attached to the establish
ment are five ''talkers," whose duty it is to
scare away dull moments by pouring into
his Majesty's ears all the tittle.tattle, scan
dal and idle gossip of Constantinople. These
takers have under them a staff of sixty
spies and sneaks, who day and night poke
their noses into the city's holes and corners
and creep up back stairs in search of spicy
items for the royal ears. There are foul
Sultans and eighty odagisq~es, guarded by
one hundred and twenty black eunuchs,
who have special servants of their own, and
live like fighting cocks. There are ten
moitres dhotel, three hundred cooks and
two hundred walters. Ten servants take
care of his Majesty's pipes, ten more of the
bit of carpet upon which he prays and ten
more pass their lives in making coffee for
him. Notwithstanding the eternal cry of
poverty raised by poor Turkey, the Sultan
manages to spend in his household not less
than SO, 200, 900 year.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1880-03-11

SWEET CONSCIOUSNESS OF Duty PER-
FoRMED.-The other day over at the Ala
media baths timid and retiring looking
man waited until the superintendent was
disengaged and then said to him:
81 do hate to give any one trouble, but
have you long stick or pole of any kind
you could lend me?"
"No, sir; told you SO ten minutes ago, y
snapped the overdriven official.
$50 you did," replied the man; ''but
thought I'd just ask once more. guess,
now, I've done my duty in the matter
Don't you think SOP"
sWhat matter? What on earth are you
talking about?"
"Why, you see, my mother-in-law dived
off down there at the deep end about half
an hour ago, and as she hasn't come UP yet
I thought I'd like to tell my wife that had
sorter jabbed round on the bottom fol her
awhile anyway, but if can't why SUI pose
l can't that's all.' And pensively writing
her address on a tag, to be tied to the old
lady when she came up, the conscientious
man walked thoughtfully away.