davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

REASONABLE PLEA.-Daughter of Cabinet
Minister! IL would give me pleasure to use my unu-
encc with papa FOR the appointment you want, but IS
already flied" Applicant "Oh, bur surely ne could
put subordinate In as WELL There must DO hOlhhS-'o
90 enough Tor twoW- Funny Folks.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

masters Department, New-fork Ivy snec,a duty az
der W. scbIey has detached ron he InspectOr
Washington aud ordered as Assistant 10 '"o '"''
~ the Secnnd Lighthonae DistrlcI.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11
CHARGED WITH CONSPIRACY TO DEFRAUD

Sylvester w. Nayfun, gateman employed by the
Manhattan Elevated Railroad COMPANY, was ar
raioned before Justice Smith. at the Tombs Police
Cont Yesterday on the charge Of having conspiTed
on July 5 to defraud the company while In the
discharge of his duty at the C0rtandt Street
Station. Abraham Metzegar. of No. 644 West Fifty
secOnd-st, inspector of the railroad company,
testified that all the station tickets are sold by the
agents and that it is the duty of the gaeman TO see
that these tickets are deposited in box where they
are cancelled by the movement of q lever which the
pateman operates. The gatemsn does not touch
fhe tickets and IL forbidden to do so. No gateman
sels tickets and no cent tickets sold at
n discount William Colgan, who Is in charge OF
the newsstand at the Corlandt Street Station SAID
that on July s. Nayfun gave him thirty uncancelled
tickets and told him that If he could sell them he
ight keep one third of the proceeds. lie sold the
tickets and handed Nayfun the amount coming TO
him. at the rate Of ~ or Ii for 81. he sub
sconently disposed of 800 or more tickets, which
were all stamped upon similar terms. giving Nay
fun the sum due him. The prisoner VIII have an
examination on August 13
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11
RETURN OF SUMMER HEAT.

RETURN OF SUMMER HEAT
A DAY OF SUFFERING CLOSED WITH GRATEFUL
Observation-Disclosures THROUGHOUT THE
COUNTRY
The temperature Yesterday recalled the heat OF
June and July. The moderate weather of the past
week or two had led many 10 believe that no lnio
days of extreme heat were to be feared iesierahhy
they learned that making calculations on the
weather is improbable. Sun umbrellas were a4lin
brought into requisition, and the man III stI"N
hat became object of envy to the man VINO %as
iniudicious enough TO leave home in lgh M.
or n Derby. The thermometer did not mark innc c,
higher degree of heat than on Monday but tue uas
was more oppressive. land breeze from lIc
southwest afforded little relief from the fierce neat
of the sun. The thermometer at Hudnuts AT . ,Is
M Indicated n temperature of ESQ., az y a. III. , as
mercury rose to 72o, and by noon temperature vi
500 was indicated. At $3.50 p. m. the reading was
500 the maximum for the day. During the next
three hours there was fall of twelve degree. .,
mainly due to the change in the direction 1i w. i
wind which yeered to the southeast, and peW ~; III
from the ocean. About q y. H. light ram SET ~
which continued for an hour and qnaritterii Ia az
though not more than . of an inch fell IL hau "
good effect on the atmosphere and made the even
ing hours more cndurable. -.
The temperature at different points throughout
the country ranged as a rule lower than III lIli i
city. According TO the reports made to the o'ShI u
was ut North Platte, Nebraska. The ioIio%imY
are the temperatures at some OF tne PIlh.Si4gSS
CHEST Albany. $50; Baltimore, So BostWVh andav
Cincinnati 7So; Cleveland, 74O lndlanapons'
$40: Leavenworth. $50; Louisville, ~; New.
Orleans. SO: Philadelphia. SO; PttsburG ST.;
ST. Louis. SO; Toledo. 500. There was rainfall
at Leavenworth of 20 inches, and Mt Grand raven
of i inches There were also light rams al DuLaiI'
Alpena. Mich Detroit, EastpOrt, Me-; keokuk'
Nashville and New Orleans.
OUTRAGEOUS ASSAULT BY A POLITICIAN.
John J. Mcguire cripple, who formerly occu-
MED the position of Town Clerk of Mlddletown'
and school Collector of tho Village Edgewater,
Staten Island was attacked last night by Thomas
Brown the late candidate for the office OF Sheriff 81
the county Brown kicked the young man until ms
face was almost mass of pulp. lie was arrested
bv a constable and brought before Justice
McCullogh. who held him in $500 to answer. Some
forty or fifty n.ned hurried meeting ana pro-
ceedcd in the direction of Browns house WIN the
Intention of suhiecting him 10 whipping. but the
police anticipated the movement and assemDlcd id
large numbers in order to protect Brown. At Md
night the streets Of the village were crowded Win
excited people.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11
MAXINE NTELLIGENOE.
MINIATURE ALMANAC,

MINIATURE ALMANAC
s,r ,... 1900 BOO sun sets 7.Ot Clock fast An. 53s.
Mon sefs q:9O Moor souths 4lG Moons ago days,
HaH WATER TOD IA.
Sandy Roo Loo GOV ll:4G Hell Gate loo
WATER rODAi-t.
candy HOOK / 81 Gov Island. = He'll GATE 1870
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

at Liverpool ADdesn tBrl. from Baltimore; At Dan.,v
ssr Biac. Watch s ron baltimore a, asIs
YORK. The British bark John Read last reported a cras
MoyIrir, Aug 10.-The str DevoDa. rom Nsw.Yorh Ia
Havsxa Aug Io"fhe str Niagara from New York. ar A
$50 a M :"
7th inst Gloria del Mare for B1limor Jessie Bor, "a
inst, CanDtidye for New York Cellar Croft awalhs lOla
Arr "a inst baltic Icapt Brnron Raven. ith inst. Ami.
Maud Bell Avvenre. Ball 9th Inst Amazon at Copao
hagen Iarnlca Modusa 6h inst Assrooom lat,s
an y ST Dydo FaDs cpt wa de S AZ
Linda Capt Yoss,r 9Th inst Fraiei Gszlolo Rena E~
Rn,h Palmer Vennsr Bek9r MsSe TABOR Suoys
DISASTERS.
uAfJP.x Aug lO.-Tbe str Camelia from Sew York N,
DnDkrk. France arr here at M having In tow steamer
Acadia from New York for glasgow. The Acadia eft Nsv
9tSsy she os her propeller and was picked uo on %n at
morning by the Camea She will be cpa!ted and proceed ia
oueBFc Aug IO-The British ship Edmund Kaye ahor.
BosfoS. Aug iSTbe American sIp Whittier lost yul,
II on saracen shoals, OF the Coast Of Borneo
lor Later Shto ye,c, any. ..- Li' P"A
little girl, noticing the glittcring GOLD
aliing m her amt's root teeth exclamei Aunt Mary
wsh had cOpporioed teeth IKE yours
MIDSUMMER MADNEss.-Wagm0re: Now,
girls what Queen OF antiquity surpassed even Thanh
In her foriicss for dODkeys lyon give u nDi Why
Dido OF course. for she fell IN love with any assKneas
don't you see p-tFun.
Announcements,
"PALMER's INVISIBLE is infinitely superior
10 all other powders" 20 the ladies talk and wufe.
"PALMER's LOTION has cured me of SORE
Eyes after trying ths 'a95t ee2Trle5 o ''oa vita
WNCUFsTER's HYPOPaO .?HiTzs
VII cure ConsumDton Coughs Bro4tn.i, ID '1iitg tS
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11
NAVAL ORDERS.

WASHINGTON, Aug. 1O.-Assistant Paymas-
ter W. t. MCGOWAN has bee ordered TO dnty IN the Pay
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

A constitution and bylaws for the use OF vnagc'
where there exist 10 Boards of Health was pre-
fled.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11
PASSENGERS FOR EUROPE.

J. H. Dolph, the artist, and wife arc among
the passengers who sail for Havre to-day on the steam
ship ST. Laurent Following is the complete cabin Lsti
roRHAyRE-nY Steamship ST LAURENT.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

"PALMER's LOTION has cured me of Sors
goa ,ffor irving the most celebrated Boston win
no success ". y. GREEN, Huntington. " Va
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

WINCHEsTER's HYPDPaO PHiTzs
VIII cure Consumption COugls. Brol:u.l'. DJitg tS
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1880-08-11

"PALMER's INVISIBLE Is infinitely superior
N all othcr powders" 80 the ladies talk and wnfe.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
Russian Vital Statistics.

The fourteenth number of the second
series of the .Satisticshe J0hr6uch,
lately published, gives some interesting
details concerning the population OF
Russia. A careful series of investiga-
tons extending over years gives the av-
erage annual number of births in Rus
STA as 3, 1913, 405; of the children born
1919, 10S were males and 1857, 297 fe-
males. The average annual deaths, 2,
$50, 196-viz.: 1,214, $50 males and l.
1877, 100 females. This gives "A net an
nual average increase to the population
of 7S1 ,209, which. assuming the popula-
ton in the fifty Governments to he about
50, 200, coo. would be mean increase Of
ID per cent. The marriages average
annually 646,9 If the present aver
age rate OF increase be maintained du-
ring the next tifty-eight years, the pop
ulation of Russia will, at the end of that
period, have been doubled. The cor
responding increase goes on much more
slowly in some other European coun-
tries. Thus, for example, according TO
the present rate of Increase i'll the sew
eral countries, the population would be
doubled III Sweden ut the end of sixty
eight years: in Belgium at the end of
seventy-nine years, and III Austria ut
mt the end of ninety-fve; but the same
result will not happen in Italy till the
end of al years, and in France till 165
years have passed The greatest in
crease is to be observed in the Western
and Southern (Polish) Governments,
where it is over 1.5 per cent, while the
least, or less than ] per cent, Is in the
Northeastern aud Baltic districts. In
the Governments of Esthonia and st.
Petersburg there is actually "A decrease
of population amounting to about O.6
per cent. in the former district, and OBJ
per cent. i'll the latter. Three per cent.
of all the children born are illegitimate,
which is only one-third of the proper
ton existing in the neighboring Sweden.
The greatest number of births occur in
autumn, and the least in spring. In the
mass of the population the proportion of
boys to girls is 102 to 100; but among
the Jews the state of things is reversed,
there being 1888 girls to every 100 boys.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16

"'Oh, Jesus !! I cry, when shall l
find Thy brother to take me under his
sheltering wings. Ali when shall Thy
son come to wash my wings in Thy
sprinkled blood?'
"The victim listened to the linnet's
song. Death was lowering over him,
but his look was one of gentle reproach,
a serene and hopeful smile passed over
his face.
"Then, with an unearthly shout, he
gave up the ghost; his head sank, the
innet fled, the sky darkened, and the
earth trembled.
81 still ran on and on in my sleep !;
dawn had come, the valley awoke smil-
ing under their morning mists. The rain
of the preceding evening gave fresh
touch to the green leaves, but the road
was still hedged with the thorns that
had impeded my course the night be-
fore. The same hard stones stopped my
way as the snakes Missed out their warn
ing note. The just mans blood had
flowed in vain for the world.
"The linnet passed on its way, telling
its tale as it went:
So In vain have l sought cleansing
stream to wash my blood-stained wings.
Look mt earth! it is no better for the
sacrifice, and L have only TO record the
burden of one more murder.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
The Pause in Reading.

During the last ten years there has
been marked increase III the number of
professional readers. The fact might
suggest to an unobserving person that
we are nation of good readers, from
whom the best have been called to de-
light the public ear. But the sugges-
ton is not supported by the facts. In
spite of schools of elOcutiOn and of COM
mon schools, too, it is difficult to find in
private life IL person who can read SO rs
to please and instruct family group.
Perhaps the following dialogues, trans
lated from the French, may point ont
one cause of bad reading
A young man presented himself, one
day, III the Office of Mr.. Samson, saying
that he wished to take lessons in elocu-
ton, and the following conversation en-
sued
"You wish to take lessons in read
ing?"
Yes, sir. -
"Have you practised reading aloud ?"
:" Yes, sir; | have read many of the
scenes III Shakespeare.
" Before people ?"
Successfully"
Yes.
"Well, take this book and read the
fable of the Oak and the Reed. ~
The pupil began AN oak one day,
said to Il reed"
"That will do. You do not know how
to read.
q suppose not, as / came here to
take lessons. But how You can Judge
from one line"
"Well, begin again.
The young man read MS before IAN
oak one day, said to n reed.
q saw it before. You cannot read. )"
"But-"
but, yes. Does az adverb belong
to n verb, or To substantive? 'One
day is here adverbial, and should be
joined to said. You should read ::
AN oak (comma) one day said to II
reed. )"
"That is true - exclaimed the Young
man, somewhat taken by surprise.
Zone of the most important points in
reading is punctuation.
How punctuation in reading, how
how can that be 2"
"By the pause. The pause is to the
ear what the punctuation marks are to
the eye. They do not, however, always
coincide. The pause is also sometimes
lighter than such as would be indicated
by comma, but by it sentence is SO
arranged that the words which belong to
each other are brought together, and
those which do not belong to each other
are separated.
Gone of the first elements of good
reading, therefore, is attention to the
pause. When due attention is not given
to this, the emphasis is liable to he mis-
placed and the sense obscured.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
Employment Of Rich Young Men.

One of our difficulties of the future, if
not of the present, is the rich young
man what shall we do with him? Here
is an admirable theme for Charles Fran
els Adams, Jr. England is about the
only land where the rich young man is
turned to some useful account. There
he travels, or goes into the Guards, then
into Parliament, attends Quarter SEES
sions, raises big gooseberries, monster
turnips and prize cattle. Here, on the
other hand, he only plays poker, polo,
whist and billiards, belongs to the Union
and Knickerbocker, goes abroad. passes
the winter mt Nice or Monaco, CANDLES,
drinks. keeps fast horses, and perhaps
other fast cattle, and "does no good, as
his elderly spinster relatives have it. If,
on the other hand, he goes into business,
the chances are he loses every cent he
has. Perhaps the very best thing he
could do would be to go into politics.
There is great and growing respect in
this country for any man who goes into
politics with honest intent, and mot on
the make" and, once in politics, "A man
soon grows interested in them.-New
York Times.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
USEFUL AND SUGGESTIVE.

To MAKE copying ink add one ounce
of moist sugar to every pint OF common
ink.
To MAKE papier mache, take paper,
any quality, boil it well, then pound it
to paste and mold.
DIR. NICHOLS suggests that the reason
fruits do not digest well when eaten af-
ter flesh, is because the gastric Juice Sc
creted to act on the meat will not act
well on the fruit. Perhaps on this ac-
count the better way is to eat fruit before
meals rather than as II dessert.
BANTING's dietary for getting rid of
superfiuous flesh, which is said to be
efficacious, is as follows: Lean meat,
poultry, game, fruit, dry toast, good
claret, dry sherry, green vegetables, and
cheese. BY this process, it will be per-
ceived that all farinaceous, saccharine, o.
oily matter is left out of the list.
COMMON paste: To tablespoonful of
flour add gradually half "A pint of cold
water, and mix until quite smooth add
II pinch of powdered alum (some add II
small pinch of powdered resin), and boil
for few moments, stirring constantly.
The addition OF little brown sugar and
II few grains of corrosive sublimate will,
it is said by practical chemists, preserve
1t for years.
WAGONS or carts with broad tires may
be drawn over newly-plowed land with
out cutting in, and on muddy roads they
are pulled with greater ease than narrow
tires, because the soil is packed down
and not cut up. The popular prejudice
in favor of narrow tires is a strange
one, rs it is impossible to keep roads in
repair where they are used. They are
also very hard on horses. If you are
about to purchase cart think of this
and have it built with broad tires.
BASKETS made of moss are exquisite
fiower-holders. They are easily manu-
featured. A light frame, of any shape
You like, should be made with wire, and
covered with common pasteboard or cal
leo, and the moss, which should first be
well picked over and cleansed from any
bits of dirt OF dead leaves which may be
hanging about it, gathered into little
tufts, and sewed with a coarse needle
and thread to the covering, SO as TO
clothe it thickly with close and COM
pact coating, taking care that the points
of the moss are all outward. A long
handle, made in the same manner, should
be attached to the basket, and tin or
other vessel filled with either W.T. sand
or water, placed within to hold the
flowers. BY dipping the whole structure
into water once in three OF four days, its
verdure and elasticity will be fully pre-
served, and block of wood about an
inch thick, and stained black or green,
if placed under the basket, will prevent
all risk of damage to the table from
moisture.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
Absence of Mind.

"Speaking of absence of mind" said
the Rev. Sidney Smith, "the oldest in
stance happened to me once in forget
ting my name. / knocked at door in
London, and asked if Mrs. b. was at
home. Yes, sir; pray, what name shall
1 say?' / looked in the mans face
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS name? Aye, that is
my question-what is my name? be-
lieve the man thought me mad, but it is
literally true that during the space of
two or three minutes L had no more idea
of who l was than if L had never existed.
/ did not know whether was dissenter
or n layman; / felt IN dull rs Sternhold
or Jenkins. At last, to my great relief,
il flashed across me that was Sidney
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
WIT AND HUMOR.
Spring Cleaning.

IT'S morn On leaving home, around glance
All there IL luxury and elegance.
The dog and cat upon the hearthrug lie;
My sweet wife kisses and says good-by,
While servants bring my hat, and coat and Gaze
With much comfort, how could one complain?
IT'S noon! A. b my home then draw near,
hear the sound of blows. The atmosphere
Is but sitting, binding cloud of DUST
That It's from carpets beaten, mistrust.
And, horror-stricken 10 the house fly
scene of desolation greets the eye
The carpets up, the curtains down, fires out,
Furniture all upset and piled about;
While, back and FORTH with heads in towels bound,
With skirts looped up foot above the ground.
And arms all barred, ny creatures-can II be
My loving wife and servants neat
Tearing about in thoee outrageous duds.
And stirring up this awful smell Of suds,
While in their eyes there CLEANS dangerous lghtY
Great Heavens, tits they! Oh, what a dreadful
sight!
The dog, once scalded, from them keeps aCof;
The cat has sought for safety on the roof.
And, in the dining-room, where / had thought
To find toothsome dinner, they have got
A hend of Afric blood. who joys to swing
whitewasfi brush and spatter everything.
But am not forgot. My feast IL spread
Out in the woodshed on a barrel head.
One slice of bread, plate of warmed-up beans,
Some water in mug, dish Of greens.
Oh, banquet rich. And, best of all, you
I've brought a fellow home 10 dine with me.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
Anti.Tea.

In 1743 there was quite an anti-tea
agitation in Scotland, where it was pro-
nounced by the famous Duncan Forbes
to be Sin many respects an improper
diet, expensive, wasteful of time, and
calculated to render the population
weakly and effeminate. During that
time there was vigorous movement all
over Scotland for abolishing the use of
tea Resolutions were passed by Town
Councils and the inhabitants of villages
condemning it, and advocating beer
Sir William Fullerton's tenants in Ayr
shire entered into the following bond:
eve, being farmers by profession,
think it needless to restrain ourselves
formally from indulging in that foreign
and consumptive luxury called tea; for,
when we consider the slender constitu-
tions of many of higher rank among
whom it is used, we conclude that it
would he but an improper diet to quail
fy us for the more robust and manly
part of our business; and therefore we
shall only give our testimony against it,
and leave the enjoyment of it altogether
to those who can afford to be weak, in
dolent, and useless.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
FunnsygrapIls.

PLANTING f1ours-Sowing wheat.
THE road to matrimony is bridal
path
JUG not, that We be not jagged, as the
Judge remarked to the bibulous va
grant.
81 NEVER waste any time listening to
the bluebirds when the dinner-gong is
winding its mellow hum"
THE difference between "A sailor and
pugilist is, that one is dashed to the
mast and the other mashed To the last OF
ought to be.
81 DON'T mean to reflect on you" said
one man to another "No, was the re-
ply, "you're not polished enough to re-
fleet upon anybody.
A NEGRO, after gazing at some Chi
nese, shook his head and solemnly said
eff de white folks be so dark rs dat ont
dar, wonder what's de color of de black
folks?"
IT is claimed that man neverloses any
thing by politeness, but this has proved
to be q mistake. As an old Philadelphia
lifted his hat to II young lady the wind
carried away his wig.
"YoU do not like TO make calls" said
IN uncle to his nephew. "But you must
make calls, he continued, =" for there's
always pleasure derived-if not when
you enter, at least when you come out
The latest puzzle is this
Hard Eggs
Boiled Mar.
The trick is to get the eggs inside the
man without breaking the shells.
A LITTLE boy having been at child's
evening party, his papa was told that
he chose the biggest girl to dance with,
50 asked him. Chow old was she?" He
said 81 would not be so rude as to
ask her.
A WRITER on style says 1T is the
fashion III France for ladies to take tea
in their bonnets and gloves" One OBJ
lection to this is that some of the bon
nets do not hold much more than small
lump of sugar.
A LITTLE boy, whose sisters stroll in the
woods for the bright-hued leaves of au-
tumn, saw them coming home the other
day with -whiskered gentleman,
whom he greeted with the remark: "My!
You got autumn-leaves whiskers, amt
you?"
A CLERK was discharged and asked the
reason. "You are too awful slow about
everything, said his employer. you
do me an injustice, " responded the clerk.
"There is one thing L am not slow
about" Il should like to hear you
nameit, "sneered the proprietor. "Well,"
said the clerk, slowly, nobody can get
tired as quick as / can
THE wife of Norman peasant is i'll.
A physician Is called in. "Will you pay
me ?" asks the mistr,istful doctor. "Oh,
Monsieur" says the husband, holding up
five louis, "kill her or cure her, these
are yours. The patient dies, and the
doctor demands the five louis. g Par
don !" says the widower did You kill
my wife o. "No. odd You cure her?'
"No, alas ~ every well, since you
neither cured her nor killed her, you did
not stand by our agreement, and l owe
Won nothing"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1880-04-16
The clarion now rang loudly.

Friends, said Gneuss, "we are driv-
ing wicked trade our sleep disturbed
by the phantoms of those we have slain.
my rest, like yours, was disturbed
by CHASTITY nightmare; / have been
massacreing for thirty years, and am
tired of it. Let us leave our brothers,
and go into the country together and till
the ground. l know of valley where
the plows are idle, for want of hands. +"
"Such is our wish, replied his COM
panions.
The soldiers buried their weapons,
bathed themselves in the cooling stream,
and arm i'll arm they started on their
new road