River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1880-03-25
LEyITY.
rnE LASS THAT rs SWEET.

There's a wItching young lass on our street
Like confeetions she sells she is sweet.
asked for kiss"
Whereupon laughed the Miss.
1 "Of course. Siliabub, you must eat
I called on that girl In our block.
Nor left till she looked at the clock:
ut Is ticking" she said;
"And it's striking dread
Good evening" said with q shock
The next call said, to attack.
''Like cents that are Old, I've come back"
And" she said, You should say
Like some new cents Won stay
Good evening again. was slack.
Once more that fair damsel tried,
But her pa he WAS waiting inside.
1t WAS leap year. know,
For the weight of his shoe
Made me leap, while she laughed till she cried.
II G. Dodge IN Norrtst0Wa Herald
Always in haste-the letter b.
A stuck-up thing-a show bill.
Diet for rrize-fg pound cake.
dumping down rope" Is what they
call hanging in Nevada.
1t Is lucky to pick up horse shoe.
unless, of course, it is attached to a
mules hind leg.
There seems to be prospect that
the Mormons will emigrate 10 Mexico.
We always said that Mexico was good
for something. -Bty!ington Haackeye.
"Nothing should be done hastily"
cries fellow who wants to be consider
ed philosopher, and man has only
to get hold of a hot poker to realize
that the philosopher is wrong. Boston
Post
The fact is becoming more apparent
every day that this world was not made
for any particular reason, but simply
for few people who are mighty par
ticular.
A fashion item says: Leather petit.
coats look like satin and wear forever"
But show us woman who has worn
one forever-or who intends to wear
one that long .-NoniStown Herald.
"a place for everything, and every
thing in its place" A man at Yale
nails his slippers on the wall four feet
up, and then all he has to do of an
evening is to wheel up his easy chair
in front of them and pull out his meer-
schaum.-An1herSt Student.
"You are an ojus, hidjus idjit, my
DEAR" said playful mamma 10 her
daughter at dancing school the other
day. 80, my dear Mrs. r" sighed
one Of her neighbors, "what wouldn't |
give to have your knowledge of Latinl"
PHILADELPHIA Bulletin.
The extraordinary ability and pre-.
cocity displayed by the average young
lady In mis-spelling apparently simple
words is at last likely to be of some
use. An Indiana girl who recently
sued an escaped lover for breach of
promise, was threatened by the young
man with an exposure of her letters in
court. The knowledge that i'll them
she had frequently spoken of 'luv,"
'harte" and 'hapie dayes," induced her
to dismiss the suit.
There was an incident of the Dow
trial, at Bolton. that most unaccounta-
bly, escaped the attention of the local
press, and yet it is entirely too good to
be lost to the public. When one of the
female witnesses was asked by prose-
cutting lawyer of we'll known conviv-
ial turn of mind, if she believed in the
Bible, she replied emphatically that
she did. "Do you believe, then, that
wives should be obedient to their hus-
bands?' asked the lawyer. She snap
ped her eyes and responded Not
when their husbands come home drunk,
like you do" You could have heard a
paper of pins fall for ten minutes after
ward. Galveston Meas.