The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1880-10-21
e sqaare qi eisns lines, 81 50 for the ar,t ia.er
Humorous.


tions.
When in passing a stately mansion
the only thing out of order is the
front gate, it is evident that there is q
marriageable daughter in the house.
Milton was asked if he intended to
instruct his daughter in the different
languages; to which he replied: mo,
sirl one tongue is sufficient for a
woman"
There is g great deal CT modesty III
this world which will gaze at almost
anything, provided it can be seen
through a crack. y visit to Long
Branch will prove this.
When man wants to make bis
enemy unhappy he Poisons his enen1y'a
dog, but 4 woman chooses a very diff
ferent way to make her enemy un-
happy. She buys some new clothes
that her enemy can't afford, and sits
in front of her enemy at church.
Two ladies met one day recently,
when the following conversation en-
sued: why, do you know what I
heard about you2" 81 have TO idea"
II heard that when your husband
was sick and not expected 10 live, you
went to q picnic" "Itt vile SIAN
der; it was only an excursion"
The latest gush-Conversation on
piazza, West End hotel, Long Branch:
Fashionable young man to anothcr
young man, not fashionable: "Is this
chair taken?" Ordinary young Iaan:
''No, you can have it." F. Y. 8I.
Thank you awfully" O. Y. NJ;
you are dreadfully welcome"
A minister stopped at a house one
day, and sought to improve the time
by giving an eight-year-old boy an in
structive lesson in morality. "My
boy" said the minister, 81 have lived
forty-five years, and have never used
tobacco in any form, nor told a lie,
nor uttered an cath, nor played
truant." ''Yer amt had no fun at
all, have YEP"
A Dutchman, in enc of the eoun-
ties Of Pennsylvania, wanted Il min
lister to preach at his child's funeral,
and wasn't unreasonably particular a.
TO who came. 'Shon," he said, "go
and call the circus preacher to come,
and if he can't, den get the locust
preacher, and if the locust preacher
can't come, why, don get the extor-
toner" (exhorter).
A loveIorn swain broke 8 wishboRe
with his hearts queen, up in New
hampshire not long since "Neov,
what d'you wish, Sally?" demendsd
Jonathan, with a tender grin of ex-
poctation. 81 wish / vas hansum,"
replied the fair damseI-" "hansum as
cud be-" "Gewhitakers! what n
wish" +" replied Jonathan. "when you're
hansum 'nuff neow." But III tell
you what I wished, Sally. I wished
you was locked up in my arms and
| the key lost"
Guibollard had been father just
, five minutes. His servant entered
with letter in his hand.
"What is that?"
"a letter"
''For whom?"
''For you"
CHOW is it addressedl'
, ''To. NJ Guibollard."
9 Glow do you know, sir, that it is
! not for my SOM"
The only place the wife of a Cor
: gressman can fairly trust him-and
2 We write this in behalf OF virtuous
| innocence-is the Washington Club,
at the National capital. The Wash
4 ington Club is composed almost en-
t tirely Of heads of families, sober.
t steady, quiet business men, who meet
5 in elegant rooms for "a little reis.xs-
= ton from their cares. The club !,
I always opened of an evening Will
4 prayer, and then these Pious gentle
o men sit around and read good books
i or discuss light, doctrinal points, suci
o as 'TransubstantiaLion, 'Infant Bae
% tism," 'Can a man marry his aun
e or els it moral or in any sense in az
J. cordance with revealed religion. fos
,r man to kill his nother-in-law?"
1t was in a Memphis street-'ar il.,
'e other day. That llessed baby hac
u been bowling for nine blocks, uuti
E. everybody else in the car had escape,
ie except a bald headed old gentleman
e. who rubbed the top of his dome o
" thought, scowled, stamped, famed
'e and gave other evidences Of being IA
u nOyed.
10 Il hope tie baby don't disturb you
oi sir" said the mother, pleasant.
rs "No, madam. it does no., he zaic
E" savagely gritiing his teeth.
he 81 am 50 glad. l was afraid i ca
on little tootsy, w"otsy, yum, yas
yum!"
gn mo madam, it don't disturb me
ks he said, still more savagcly "Ljst