The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1880-12-24
Pmmulansal,s Fest.

Woman is by nature SO erratic and In
consistent creation that it doesn't do
to bet on even her most marked charac-
| teristics. For illustration, old Mr..
| Pungleup, of Mob hill, was comment
ing on the railroad velocity with which
young ladies jabber to each other when
they meet, without either in the least
understanding or replying to what the
other says.
"It's just mean falsehood gotten up
by you good-f or-nothing men F." said the
youngest Pungleup girl, indignantly.
CAL right, said her father, benignant-
~; "well try an experiment. I see
your friend, Miss Gluckerson, coming
up the street. Now, I'll wager that new
walking suit you want so much that
you can say roast turkey and cram
berry sauce in response to the first half
her noticing the i2ct."
ST never heard anything SO perfectly
absurd" replied Miss P; "however, I
might as we'll have that sl1it-it's just
too lovely for anything-so I'll just do it
to teach you lesson
"Mind, now" said her father, as the
front door bell rang, "fair play. You
mustn't change your expression in the
least, and you must repeat the sentence
IN your usual voice and manner-that is
to say, in single breath--an run to-
gether as it were"
Just then Miss Gluckerson was shown
into the parlor, and through the library
door old P. could hear the usual oscula-
tory peck exchanged, and Miss G. ex-
claim, without even the smallest comma
in the whole remark:
ooh you lazy thing been here a per-
feet age don't look at this hat perfect
fright going to have flowers set back and
bow changed why wasn't you at matinee
Harry was there"
Roast turkey and cranberry sauce"
rapidly inserted Miss P, accompanying
the words with that preliminary and
concluding gurgle with which all women,
for some occult reason, invariably adorn
their conversation when DESTROYS of be-
ing agreeable.
"Going to Mrs. Badgers party 2"
continued Miss Gluckerson, with the
serene rattle of brook over the pebbles.
Molly Smith is going they tell me she
paints pas promised me phaeton in the
spring saw that hateful Mrs. Guppery
on the street buff overskirt and green
ruching just fancy"
"Roast turkey and cranberry"
"Oh, George Skidmore's mothers
dead. Ouch! got flee in my sleeve
little beast just eating me up alive bury
her next Sunday did you get that edg-
ing at Gimp's?"
Roast turkey and cram"
The girls at CIark's are to graduate
next Thursday Jennie Giggles is going
to be square cut with inside illusion and
white kid boots can't you come round for
dinner tomorrow and stay all"
"Roast turkey and"
might, and show Milly your new
basque? That man with a light over
coat stared at me again yesterday Jim
O'Neill is going East this candy fright
full stale. ?
"Roast turkey"
I" Ma thinks Mrs. Brown amt proper
those ferns are just too lovely look at
these cuffs clean this morning are my
crimps coming out yours amt Lille
Skippen says you met Charlie Boggs the
other night and he said something nice
about me tell me quick =
Roast turk
Why how perfectly absurd you are,
Linda, interrupted the visitor, angrily.
"You don't listen to word say I was
asking about Charles Boggs not roast
turkey George Shelly thinks you're aw-
full nice now tell me what did he say
good gracious what are You hugging
me for 2"
"And, Tilda,' thoughtfully remarked
Miss Pungleup, after the matter had
been explained and her father admitted
that he had lost by scratch, 1T believe
in my heart that if You hadn't thought
about Charliesjust then, / shouldn't have
had any new suit this winter"
All Of which goes to show that there
at least one subject upon which one