Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1880-01-02

49, FSORA0 Va ULOSyuGAs lOf IVA f0Va
fell upon the last meeting in this wbfd
OF Lee and Jackson. Cor. Globe dem.
-----T ttr- 1---rrr,rAc 10 T...i,.
I ta io4 pet DETROIT at Currency. s.t.1
Burglars should not be sneezers.
Every iceberg SHOULD ,tbe provided
1 with an electric light.
4 Ten people laugh Where " one e ciii Sa,
and yet they call this a vale OF tears.
i A sage hen-one who avoids the hawk.
1-tBoston Post. A ssgef hen one Who
avoids the cook. edi g,5a .5oa1I nisl
One reason why Chicago il not a
4 healthy place is because the country
around it is always III. u "" ia '.'''
! The $780, 600 which Lord Rosebery
Y won on the turf this season shows that
] his horses are we'll heeled. .,..,...,.,
Why door nail is any more dead
than door, must be because IL has been
hit on the head.-[ N. o. Picayune. f..
Columbus made the egg stand, but
Italians Of less renown have made. the
peanut standby New Haven Journal.
1t takes six Years to teach a bear to
dance, and iereh then he is opt to stop
1 IN the middle Of waltz and eat some
small boy up. 49,.
Ole hundred thousand cords ~ II tim Ii !:
Der are required each year to shoe-peg
\ America. atid,than hesss Of her citizens
are only half soled ,st that. 20. 49,,
| Utica claims to be the coolest city in
New York. State during the winter.
That's where all the mensit in church.
with buffalo, oyershoes on, %, .;,1,
!. A New York court hss decided that q
couple car marry themselves in the
presence of witnesses, ani that's IS
saved for car fare and cigars. ,in,7Aja..
The man who takes sides in dispute
about ventilation knows % good deal
less than the one who punches out d
pane of glass with his elbow. -,
Womankihd is like cider-sweet when
first sdueezed. but growing more vine
gar-like after lying around for a few
years.-[New Haven Register. ,-m
A thorough man OF the world is one
who can shake hands cordially with q
friend whom he has Just black. balied at
. club New Orleans Picayune. ,.,
| When q citizsn is awakened at mid
night by, crash of glass downstairs,
he isn't AHits c6nsoled by the thought
that lie has psthing 10 be robbed Of. ,e
Everything has recently advanced in
price except liberty, which remains at
eternal vigilance, with liberal reductions
to tile trade.-[ Peck's Milwaukee san.
There lis no underground sea under
the. State of, Michigan, as some have
commended, but good solid bottom, in
which it taxes half day to set hitch
ing.post. :, lgn ,fy.iGe p. lesc
The only time you, can ever get q
woman ont OF. a, theater befdre the play
is over, is @Aen She discovers that no
one else. wore al old bonnet on account
of the weather. ,.,, ,....,s ...... ..
Is collector of moths u mother p
| Post. No more than collector OF fat
Is father Boston Commercial Bull
letin. Ora collector of broth a brother.
-[New York Advertiser.
There is something aoft and tender in
the fall Of single snow. flake, but when
aud tshoveling away a big drift, it's
emery, mean and disgusting.
Several Of the big cities are now
wrangling over which has the most SCOT
and dirt. Come where you can wear a
white shirt four weeks and then lend it
to some one who wants to attend a
party.
Make scrap-book, hide it in an old
chest, and twenty years, after you are
dead some young ladies literary society
will bless your memory for thus
thouehtfully supplying it with original
essays.
There are 80, 900 persons serving SEN
fences in the State prisons of the United
States, and yet no man can step into q
hole through the sidewalk without com.
planning that this is no country for law
and justice. 4,.tl -... '-.
The young man OF New Hampshire
who, toying with a pistol that positively
wasn't loaded, blew his brains out,
should have monument. All the other
fools insist on killing somebody else.--
Buffalo Express. . 'f'-
An Ogdensburg philosopher says that
we cannot have cold weather until after
warm weather leaves, and vice versa.
That is just as good philosophy as any
thing said by Diogenes, and yet this
American is not known outside of his
township.
Says the New York Commercial iAd-
vertiser: "A gentleman's blood corpus
cles average 5000 to an inch, a hogs
1900. When you see party spreading
himself over half dozen seats on an
excursion steamer, you may know ex-
actly how many corpuscles lie pos
sesses." 'i-' "
WEDDING IN BRIrTANY.-The we'd
ing costumes were wonderful to be-
hold. The groom was wealthy. His
sleeved waistcoat was of no common
cloth, but of rich blue velvet, curl
.ously embroidered, his sash of rich
blue silk and his hat bound with a
broad silver ribbon. The unity OF his
costume was somewhat marred by