River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1880-05-27

A brides dress is of fawn colored cash
mere.
The prisons of Russia contain 60 900
people.
Siberia is beautiful country to all
but the exiles.
BALTIMORE girls wear the biggest
bangs.
TUBERosEs have appeared in flower
market.
THE Queen of Sweden is seriously
i'll.
President Greyy has 100000 for
travelling expenses and entertaining.
Eiain Booth has earned 100000
since his bankruptcy.
Blue china is very pretty, even if you
have nothing for breakfast.
The flesh of the zebra is the best ami
mai food in Africa.
The healthy chicks don't wait for
others to scratch for them. Very
unlike some healthy sorter male men.
Mr.. Beecher says that on days when
his liver Is out Of order the kingdom of
OF heaven is outof order, too.
"When / die" said weary husband,
81 want to go where there are no more
fires to make" Perhaps you may"
said his good wife.
The trustees of the Rev. ]. II. Hart
ley's church, in Cincinnati, have asked
him to resign, on account of his habit
of borrowing money and never paying.
Gen. Sherman has strong admira-
ton for women whose physical endur-
auce is great. He speaks with pride
ance of his third daughter, Mis- Ellie.
A colored cook, expecting company
OF her kind, was at a-loss how to enter
tain her friends. Her mistress said,
Chloe, you must make an apology"
"Lal missus, how can make it2 | got
no apples, no eggs, no butter, no muffin
to make it wild"
The members of young ladies' de-
batting society in Troy have decided in
favor of long courtshlp. Level-headed
girls. Observation has taught them
that there is wonderful falling off of con-
fections, balls, carriage rides, and opera
when courtship ends and the stern
realities of married life begin.
A lady tells something which ought
to have remained secret with her sex.
1t is that woman, in choosing q lover,
considers good deal mere how the
man will be regarded by other women
than whether she loves him herself.
Did it ever occur to you, kind mamas.
while trotting your babies on your lap
in such a vigorous way, that if some
giant about ten times your size were
to trot you in similar manner, the
breath would be very apt to be bounced
out of yuor body?
II he puts his arms around her like
bear and stops her breath when he
kisses her, they are not married, but
they are likely to be. If he puts his
hands on her shoulder, leans forward a
little, snatches the prize, and falls back
they have been married two weeks. If
he comes up with his hands in his peck
cts, looks out of the window, says:
"Well, good-by," gives her tasteless
smack, and rushes off, they have been
married two years. and lie is desert.
John Williams, a merchant at Rat
ledge, Ga, sued a desperate. The fell
low entered the store in furious pas
sion, held out the summons in one
hand, clutching long knife in the 9TH
er, and said: Williams, have you sued
me?" Williams knew that an immedi-
ate Eyes" would make him sure of a
stab. "Let me get my spectacles, SO
that | can read the paper" he said. He
went behind the counter and came back,
not with his glasses, but with an axe
across his shoulder. eyes," he said, 81
have sued YOU" "All right" remark
ed the desperado, 81 guess I'll pay the
bill"