Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1880-04-10
TRUE STORIES ABOUT ANIMA1s


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Presidential Question.
burlington Hawkeye.l
The elephant amestrolfing into the big tent
just after the close OF the afternoon perfOr-
nance. and the animals were taking politics.
having caught 1t from the Chatter they had
heard in the audeace. They didn't know a
great deal about politics ia the cages, but that
you know. children. is no bar to talking poll
Tics Indeed. no Some of our Congressman
who hold on TO office the longest, and talk the
most and the loudest, don't-but digress. The
elephant listened to the rest of the animals
for little while, and then he said to the
giraffe:
"Who is your candidate for President?-
{. Blaine" said the giraffe.
Yes" the elephant said, that's you. Your
ideas ore always away up. You can't get yorr
cause Mr.. Blaine was so quick to see where the
giraffe came in. In Dr. Garcelon's menager1e,
you think he viii pay particular attention to
cratic friend. Your head isn't as long as your
neck. by forty feet. You can't come the giraffe
over MIR. Blaine. l say, Old Faithful he con
tInUed, addressing the big dog In the Happy
Family "Who Is your MANI"
The Newfoundland said he was for John
Sherman.
res" the elephant said, because he's In
Will want the tariff put upon dogwOod, just the
same as Peruvian bark. We'll, go ahead, howl
for a free ballot and an unmuzzled press, and
don't whine IL you are beat, as you usually do
Jean Valjean." he went on turning to the
tiger, who do you 60 for?:'
ANY man that comes clos to my cage" re.
correct you are" said the eleph INT; but
you can count me out when you begin ballot
ing Who is the next animal to voter"
EThe hyena said he was for ss-Tilden first, last,
I'm bet you," commented the elephant,
ANY body might know you would go for a
dead man, you wretehed apotheosis of an Oaio
medical student. All, you Seventeenth Wari
resurrectiOnist, you'll run against a Circlevllle
torpedo some OF these days that will knock that
smile of yours into a cooked hat. Any re-
spectacle citizen OF the menagerie ready to ex-
press his preference beforeI close the polls?"
The tortoise said he was In favor OF Fitz-John
Porter.
"Of course you are" said the elephant, "be-
cause he moves just about fast enough to suit
YOU. gait. If he doesn't move forward any
livelier for the Presidency than he did for
General Pope, he won't hear Of the nominal
make good running mate for him in war
time, and you ought to get along pretty well In
politics. The next geological wonder and liv-
ing curiosity will step up lively; can't keep
for the evening performance yet
the turkey expressed himself warmly In
favor OF David Davis.
that's because he keeps you company on the
fence all the time. Moreover, he looks more
like me than any OF the other candidates, and it
Is emlnently proper and respectful In you to
from the plains and the jungles?"
me gopher shouted as Justify as he could for
Mr.. Seymour.
Sure enough" said the elephant, because
he stays in his little hole all the time, Just ike
yourself. Well, gopher him If you visa: this is
a free country, all except the menaserie which
costs you one quarter Of a dollar every time
you look at it. Come now. move along lively
or you lose your votes; polls close i'll
The wild ass OF the desert here stepped to the
front and roared his voice for Mr.. De La Matyr,
of Indiana. amid the widest enthusiasm and
loud hOotingS throughout the tent.
The elephant wfnked at the cages with
merry twinkle in his eye. That's right my
brave cactus-eater,' he Said ''yOu are natur-
ally and properly one of Mr.. De La Matyr'S fol-
lowers. Brays him up to the skies If you want
TO. Nepotism is fashionable in this country
now. Next voter"
The monkey tlmidly said that If he We're al
lowed vote he would vote fOr-
Proctor knOttlr roared the whole mena-
gerle but the elephant said sternly, 'sThere
now; enough of that; no intimidation at the
polls. NO one else. OyeZ, oyeZ, The polls are
closed and the Judges will now proceed to count
the ballot
He then announced the result of the vote as
follows: Grant, 81
But" inquired the animals, ..how does that
come?''
"Well," said the elephant SIT comes. all the
same, and don't you fOrgetft. Don't I weigh
more than all this menagerie put together?
what do you animals know about politics, any
how"
Ana the animals were well pleased to think
they were allowed to vote any how, and they
were delighted that the election was over and
their man elected, 80 they gave three cheers for
Grant, and rolled around In the straw to dress
for the evenings performance,