Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1880-04-08
"OId Abe's, Small Pex Scare.

"Oku ADe's Sm0AE FOX Sc8fes
s. j. Brisbin, in philadelphia Times.
One day not long after Mr.. Lincoln
issued his Emancipation Proclamation
Ben Wade came in, laughing all over
his face, and said:
"Well, Old Abe has done Just the d.
thing you ever heard of. He has given
out he has the small pOx to keep the
politicians and Office seekers away from
the White Honse."
The story ran thus: Mr.. Wade went
to the White House to see Lincoln, who
had been i'll. He found the President
little pale, but jolly as he could be.
"Sit down, Wade, am glad to see you.
D, have the funniest thing to tell you;
it will make you laugh. i never did
such thing before in my life. and new
er will again" Then the President
laughed until the tears rolled down his
cheeks.
"Now, Wade," he said, "you are not
to repeat this outside, for IL would give
offence. and it by no manner of means
comports with the dignity which Is sup
posed to hedge President about. The
doctor put me up 70 1t to get rid of
bore: ought not to have done II, but
couldn't help 1t, it was so funny. You
know | have been ill,and q great many
people wondered what allied me, bus
none of them could Hnd out. The truth
Is was worried to death, and talked
sick pretty msch by one man. the most
everlasting bore you ever saw, who
wanted an Office. / knew he would come
again as soon as was able to sit up,aad
the doctor put me up to get rid Of him
by saying had the smallpox. / only
got out yesterday, and surs enough this
morning he called on me. had deter
minep to be polite to him, but be stayed
so long the humor seized me and / sent
for the doctor. Giving him the wink,
held outmy hand, and inquired:
Doctor, what marks are those on my
handp"
"That's varioloid, or mild smallpox"
said the doctor.
"Well,' said /, ats all over me. It's
contagious, is it not, doctor?'
livery contagious, indeed he replied,
and you should see no one
"My visitor, who had been getting
more and more nervous every moment,
now could stand it no longer and, rising,
said:
"'Well, Mr.. Lincoln, can't stop any
longer. just called to see how you
were,' and then started to hurry out.
"'Stop a minute; want to talk to
you,' said l, about that Office
Excuse me, Mr.. President You are
not well this morning, and l will not
lother you,' said he, showing toward the
door,
Never G.. mind said ], don't be in q
hurry. It's all right, and if you are GO
ing to get the variOloid you will get it
now anyhow; 30 you might as well sit
down
THANK you, sir, but I'll call again.
be replied, fairly turning livid ana exc
cutting a master ly retreat from the fear
full contagion with which he supposed
me to be afflicted
Now said Uncle Abe, it will be
all over the city in an hour that have
the smallpox, and you can contradict the
story, but want you to promise you
won't repeat what 1 have just told
you.'
Wade laughed until he was weak, and
when he could get his breath sufficient
ly to speak ne looked at the clock As was
his custom and said:
NOW lOT d llIll6 DuSiueoS anu L Will
60"
sDon't 60" cried Uncle Abe, and lay
ing his head on his hands ON the desk
IN front of him he laughed until he
shook all over. Presently raising up his
race from between his hands he wiped
MS eyes and blew his nose until the re-
port sounded like the winding of horn.
After another fit of laughing he said:
"Wade, you should have seen him,
and nov scared he was. I'll bet that fell
low never comes back here while / am
President.
As might have been expected, hardly
lad M. Wade quilted the White House,
when he heard the President had the
smallpox, and was very sick. Wade
contradicted the story, but
that night it was telegraphed all over
ihe country, and many people will yet
remember the story of Mr.. Lincoln haV-
ing the varioloid during the war.
Commenting on the report, Uncle
Abe said to Wade: Some people said
they could not take my proclamation
very well, but when get the smallpox,
Wade, shall then be happy to say
nave something everybody can take"