The New Orleans daily Democrat. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1877-1880, 1880-02-15
CURRENT HuMoR.

Uowley'e Fold seems to be the great anti
fat remedy.
Az Virginia was to presidents, go ls Ohio
TO candidates.
A lady OF the pennlless Hungarian nobility
will go out to work at sewing for less than
thirty cents day, but the parcels must be
carried by a servant.
The only bad thing about a burglar alarm
Ia the fact that 1t gives the burglar chance
10 run before you can open window and give
him fatherly advice.
school how ehe liked her new teacher, re-
piled: II do not like her: she Ii just 30 saucy
10 me az my mother
"Have you enemips7" ie an Innocent In
qulry. We should be sorry II we had not.
man without al enemy, according to the
good book, would have no one to love.
In ancient days the preeept Was KNOW
thygelf. In modern times It has been cup
planted by the Tar more fashionable maxim,
Know thy neighbor and everything about
him"
Civilization Ii working on the Washington
Utes, Not long stnee Ouray used To wear
feathers In ha hat; now II is Mrs Ouray that
wears them, and she got them from New
FORK milliner.
The difference between woman and an
umbrella ls, that there are times when You
can shut up an umbrella -[stenhenville
Herald. But there is also q similarity when
both owe their shape to whalebone.-L STAN
ford Advocate.
1t Ia understood that the trouble between
the Czar OF Russia and his vile will soon re-
cult In q separation, the gzaiina reeumlng
her family name. The gpesips gay that the
Gear objects to the fancy OF his wife for ira
yelling, and thinks she has been Romanun
long enough.
A soldier asks three days furloush to 60
tn. HI tc has H.
bed. Take It,. Gays the captain. q rigid
dlecipllnarian, "but II you're dece,vlng me,
and the old girl doesn't kick In the three
daye, III jam vow into the guard. house for
fifteen days"
A boy after hearing Wendell Phillips lecture
him an Office; he seems to know. ell about
everything7" "He can make more leeturing."
said the father, absent mindetily. This WAS
the youths fllst lesson In patriotism erl-
den Recorder.
Never go back on your ulster. It ls life-
West was In danger VI being run over by A
train Of cars pulled off hs ulster and threw
Il In front OF the train just In the nick oil lime.
The train was thrown from the track and the
mans life was saved Rome sentinel
The Detroit noat says: king John Of
to the Christian religion. His method OF con-
version is to pour boiling tallow into the eyes
and ears Of the subject until he repents.'
Any Moslem who converted Christians In
that manner would be a herrid brute.
There are no snakes In Iceland, and the Ice
landers know nothing OF the reptile. aud 80
when one of the Inhabitants of that Isle has
the jim. jams he can't Imagine that he sees
snakes, and has TO be eontented with thinking
that he's trying to get away from q horrid
dog with nineteen legs and three bears with
Illuminated heads.
former president of New England col
lege after getting seat In horse car noticed
one OF the freshmen OF his college eurled up
In front Of him, and exhibiting obvious
signs OF vinous exhilarRtion A close iDspee-
tion revealed the fact that tbunetate Ut ine-
briefly was not hastily put on like hatl. but
several days. For q few moments the presl-
dent surveyed the undergraduate with an ex-
preston OF mingled commiseration and die
gust. and he finally exclaimed, "Been on a
hia straying senses. and with CLEAN Of good
fellowship In his eye. somewhat nnreepeut-
fully calculated. "so-hic- r.
We notice that Capt Boyton gave an ex-
hlbitlon recently. at regatta In Florida.
What were the alligators In that river doing2
is recorded OF that generally alert sauriaD.
Score one for Israel. The following anecdote
dlscloeea that there are Jewish wits ma well
az tradeemen. 1t Is narrated that would
be Joker In q mixed company remarked ::
Now, my friends, think Japan is the best
place to live In the world / understand that
there are neither Jews nor pigs there" A dim
inutive specimen, but with an Enthusiastically
Hebrew cast OF countenanee, replied: well.
mine friend, l tell you vat 1t ls. Let's you
and me go there aud exhibit ourselves. We
could make our fortune. 1 could represent
the Jews and you could take the rest OF the
role In perfection