Daily press and Dakotaian. [volume] (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1875-1880, 1880-03-06
1hf Datlp frsss aud Dalstatas
,A.st0h DAKOTA.
Evening. March 8, 1880.
Mr.. Ano mss. PARADOX.

Mr.. AND 069. PARADOX.
Indulge In . Liaale Discussion upon Mat
tiers of n ssrio . asuFe
'Only three short years since we Furnished
,hi. parlor together" said Mrs. Paradox
"and now"
"Yes, nov" echoed Mr.. Paradox, reso
lnlely thrnsting hi. hands deep down 10 BIZ
trousers pockets. "Ihing. are altered now
Abby Jane"
"OnIy three years." said Mrs. Paradox
sorrowfullv.
"Three years of cat aud dog quarrelinR,'
commented the husband, grimly.
You said the pink damask window cur.
'ains we've jn.t The color of my cheeks !!
falterea Mrs. Paradox.
And even then, il you'll be good enough
to recall the fact to your memory, Mrs. p
remarked her husband, I'VE couldn't sgree
AZ 10 the pattern Of the parlor carpet, moi
whether the walls ehould be kalsomined OF
papered.".
We never have agreed" said Mrs. Para.
dox, with pur+ed up lips.
"And We never shall y said Mr.. Paradox,
"perhaps it's better on the whole. that
we are to separate" said the lady.
ooh, altogether" acqniesced the gentle.
man, rafting the pennies indiierently in
his pocket.
1--WE never were suited to another" siehed
Mrs. Paradox.
"Couldn't have been worse matched il
We had tried for IT," remarked her huk-
band.
"Il's a pity we hadn't found it GU, before
we were married. said Mis-. Paradox.
"Bet,er late than never" said Mr. Para
dox.
We'll. | thought l did"
Il might have known that men were de-
ceivers ever" quoted the wife.
"Oh, come now, Abby Jane, that isn't
fair" said Mr.. Paradox. "Our first uusrrel
was when you turned Rover out of the
parlor-the old Newfoundland that had
saved my life"
mo it wasn't" said Abby Jane, with
spirit. ut was when you called my aunt
Anastasia IAN old BORE and said you would
not take her to the evening prayer meet.
ing. My unit Anastasia, with property in
government bonos and q temper like an
angels"
"rhat's all very WE'LL" said Mr.. Paradox,
but you seem to have forgotten that you
treated my friend Dickens as if be i'd
UtCu u uSS-UI6hhS when i OFOuQnt MIN
unexpected to dinner!'
You refused TO take me to Saratoga,
when DR.. BodkiDs said that the waters
were essential TO my health" f.shed out
the lady.
You wouldn't consent 10 have nv
mother come and live with u.s." retorted
Mr Paradox. twitching his moustache.
If your mothers temper was half as had
c po,,rc-O bovop NJ, D...A>- a.-,-
to the very roots of her hair.
'There you go sgaln!' said Mr.. Paradox
beginning to pace savsgely up and down
the room. VINO on earth could be ex.
pec'ed to put up with this sort of thing. >"
You'll rot haye 10 put up' with it much
longer said Mrs. Paradox, drawing hersel
up.
Thank goodness, no." said Nj. Paradox.
"The lawyers will arrange Ill that
enuncia'ed the lady.
The sooner the better" said her hns.
band.
OF course, it will make a dreadful scan
'inl. me going home to mama, and ALL
tal'eted Mrs Paradox.
Not at all" said Mr.. Paradox. "Sepa
raiions are common things nowadays"
And dare say" cried out his wife
wa 49, "a Sou y W. ANVvd SCOll1 T., III
wherever The horrid place is that YOUR,
going to. you'll be making love to som,
other WOMAN
Not IT, said MIR. Paradox, quite unmov-
ed ny his spnuse's ,aunts. 1--WE had Quit,
enough If that sort of thing, thank YOU"
Heres the lawyer coming to draw u.
the papers," said Mrs. Paradox, looking GU
from betwte the rose colnred damask CUT
iAIiiS. 'aHG Pm Glad of in
$50 am T." SAID Mr.. Paradox, with fin. .
hearted collou>ness.
You're q brute!' Grid the wife.
$50 you have often remarked before
said the husband biting off he end of {
cigar.
That's no reason you should insult mi
by smoking in my p%resence!'
do not be afraid, msdam-yOu have al.
ready taken sufficient opportunity to inform
me ct your aversion to my habits"
And only the entrance of the LAWYER
suttlced to arrest impending no stilities.
1t was quite trne. Mr.. aud Mrs. Paradox
afier union Of three yesre. had agreed
hat they couldn'! agree, and were 10 sign &
legal separation. 1t was altogether
the best ,hipg-in fact the only
one, they mutually decided. L
had been acold, scold, carp, carp, fret, fire,
ever since they had walked out Of the church
porch. Domestic peace had long ago fold
ed her wings and floated out Of the win,
dow I; love and tender sympathy had shrunk
startled away. And at the end of thea
three years friends had been called in coun
Gil, a solemn session Of relatives had bee,
held, and Mr.. and Mrs. Paradox were goin
to separate.
you're sure you don't care for her
Louisw Parado1's dearest friend an,
college chum had said to him.
ooh, that's quite a thing of the past,
said Paradox, with a shrug Of the shoulders
"You have ceased to love him, dear
Mrs. Paradox's mother questioned he
child.
ooh, mamma, long ago." declared poo
little Abby Jane, with streaming eyes.
So the papers we're signed, aud Mr.. an
Mrs. Paradox separated in good earnes
Abby Jane ven back to the maternal HON,
and MIR. Paradox took up bis quarters in
hotel until he could arrange for his final d.