Connecticut western news., 1880-03-31
WIT AND WISDOM.

l 4OO CANNOI US NNON has made you, but you may be worse.
 A LITTLE LEARNING is dangerous thing. This applies to violin playing.
 BREArHEs THERE man with soul SO dead who never to himself hath said-13- 14-15.
 ODER AT any price !" yelled the hun gry traveller who ordered venison for dinner.
 THERE IS always room for man of force, and he makes room for many Emerson.
 SONG OF the coin-clppers "Punch, brothers, punch with care, punch hole in the trade dollaire.
 A NOBLE HEART, like the sun, showeth its greatest cortntenance at its lowest es- tate.-Sir Philip Sidney.
 WE RELIEVE that Gods power is with out limit why should we not believe the same of his mercy ?-Bocee.
 THE KNOWLEDGE of the art of Indian fighting seems to be confined exclusively to the authors of dime novels.
 NEVER, SAYS the Hackensack Repud- lican, strike a feather bed when it Is down, especially if the ticking is ripped.
 THE HORNET and mule are too tender-hearted to look upon suffering. They always turn their back when they strike.
 A FAMILIAR INSTANCE of blindness IS that of man taking a brown silk um- brella and leaving green gingham one ill its place,
 GIRLS SHOULD be careful how they scatter kisses among their gentlemen friends Young onions from the South are in the market.
 WE SACRIFICE to dress till household joys and comforts cease. Dress drains our cellar dry, and keeps our larder lean.-Co,Opcr.
 A MICHIGAN CONGRESSMAN told a friend that he was filled with amazement, and the friend went down to the bar and called for amazement.
 IT APPEARS that General Melikof was saved from Vladetski's bullet by vest of chain mail. He had "pulled down his vest to some purpose.
 REFLECT UPON your present blessings, of which every man has many; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.-C Charles Dickens.
 A MAN OUT West has named his infant son Ingersoll. When that boy grows up he will be awfully embarrassed to find that he has no Christian name.
 CoL, ALEX MCCLURE editorilaly observes in the Philadelphia Times that "girl babies are ever so much nicer after they have got to be sixteen or seventeen.
 FAnsEHooD, like poison, will generally be rejected when administered alone, but when blended with wholesome ingre- dients may be swallowed unperceived.- Whately.
 THE LATE Mrs. Mary Chapman, an ac- tress we'll known on the Pacific coast, was the mother of twenty children. She not only filled the stage, but she crowded the omnibus.
 THERE IS some difference between "cheek" and "brass." Cheek asks for anything any time without the sign of a blush. Brass comes up and takes it without asking.
 BuRpErTE SAYS that 0 Presidential vote was taken on railway train out West, recently, and the result showed thirty-two more ballots than passengers. He sets this down as "straw."
 THOSE WHO speak always and those who never speak are equally unfit for friendship. A good proportion of the talent of listening and speaking is the base of social virtues. s.-LaUGter.
 "Y1s YER riverance, all thim names he called me, an sez I, T wouldn't demane meself to lose me timper wid such low blackgyard,' so I iist knocked him over wid the stick, and come away"
 DID IT ever occur to you why a lawyer . who is conducting disputed will case is like trapeze performer in a circus ? Didn't? We'll, it's because he flies through the heir with the greatest of fees.
 EUaENE's NEoK1AoE-pearls the size of marrowfat peas, emeralds till you can't sleep and no end of diamonds-is for sale. Here is chance for some Lead , vile chap to give his girl tidy present that doesn't come every day. A WESTERN MINISTER told the trustees f of his church that he must have his , money, as his family was suffering. "Money P said one of the trustees, "you preach for money I thought ,, you preached for the good of souls. " , The minister replied, "I can't eat souls, , and if I could, it would take thousand such as yours to make a meal. A YOUNG LADY writes to an exchange 1: "for my part, prefer an evening passed , at home with pleasant book to attend , ing balls, parties and theaters," Oh, f certainly. When young lady hasn't 8 f beau, nor new bonnet, nor new walk f ing costume, she generally prefers to re- main at home with book-which she is too mad to read. t PEoK's MInwAuKEE Sun, a humorous , paper, has increased its price from $2 Q year to 2,50, on account of the rise Tn , white paper. It says, "Those who take the paper take it for the fun there is in it, and we feel confounded sight funnier if we are making something than if we are losing. We are too old to work for glory and too lazy to work for fun. !"