The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1880-12-17
BREVITIES.


gun.
SAID he, "Let us be one." And shs
was won.
A HAIR-cUTrER without a customer is
a head-waiter.
A oREDITABLE action-Trusting man
for groceries.
a TRAMP. in stage parlance, is walk
ing gentleman.
WHAT is the spot most dear to cattle
Their fodderland.
HENRI RooHEFoRT has been writing
communistic novel.
SOME of the most tinlid girls are not
heightened by loud bang.
Can man intoxicated by music be
SAID to be air-tight?
OLD maids are described as ''eSnbers
from which the sparks have fled"
A NEW brand of tobacco is called the
Buzz Saw" Fine cut, of course.
A FAINT pocket-book never won Q fair
lady. 1t is the man who wins.
CANADA has no mint, and consequent
ly the juleps OF that country must lack
flavor.
In Hood county, Texas, at the last
election Garfield did not get single
vote.
SOME wise man writes "BpstIe is
not industry" Neither is corset fin
ance.
"Nor good if detached" may apply
as well to married people as to railroad
tickets.
FEMALE conomy-buyinga half-dollar
straw hat, then putting $11.5O worth Of
trimmings on 1t.
CAMBRIDGE College, England, has de-
cided to drop Greek from the list of re-
quired studies.
MILKMBN very rarely have water Oh
the brain. They put it where it is far
more profitable.
NEVER run up small debts. Creditors
are like children-the smaller they are
the more they cry.
GEN. GRANVILLE NJ. DODGE says the
Texas Pacific railroad will run into New
Orleans year from now.
THERE /, no fish in the world that will
increase in weight like a trout after it
has been pulled from the water.
"ANEnglishman is never sonatUral as
when he is holding his tongue" says
the heroine Of Mr.. James new story.
A MAN may carry watch for years.
and still be unfamiliar with the wheels
Of the little ticker. They travel in cog.
Rev. JOSIAH HANSON, Harriet Beecher
Stoves original "Uncle Tom" is to
have new 81, 500 church at Dresden,
Ont.
THE London Times calls attention to
the fact that Washington Irving's fame
as writer increases with the lapse of
time.
The Emperor William of Germany is
represented as very feeble, and has to be-
lifted in his carriage when about to
ride.
The latest caprice is to have ones
bedroom upholstery to match ones
dresses, and china to match the bed
room.
A MAN has no remedy for his hair fall
ing off. A woman can always use hair
pins and keep on as much hair as she
likes.
SIR THOMAS BoUCH, the engineer who
built the Tay bridge, died not long ago,
worn down with modification and
Chag1in.
MUFFs match the bonnet, and are
trimmed with ecru lace, wide ribbon
bows, and ornaments of gold, silver,
steel and jet.
The waste basket in an editors office
is nearly IS important as his paper.
What properly belongs in one should
not go in the other.
THE Boston Journal Of Commerce
publishes a lot of dyeing recipes, but
none of them beat the old way OF fOoling
with an empty shotgun.
"GATB," says Gen. Rosecranz, sis
a rather excitable man, with not enough
lid to the top Of his head, SO that lit
tie heat underneath raises the said top
right off.
BEWARE of quarrels. They are often
raised about the merest trifies, and yet,
when once begun, are with the greatest
difficulty imaginable brought to friend
ly conclusion.
The Mexicans of Chihuahua call upon
the United States to help pay the offered
reward of $4,000 and $50 per scalp for
their determination of Victoria and his
band of Apaches.
So MANY persons commit suicide by
jumping off the three bridges across the
Tiber, at Rome, that a pIlilanthropical
society keeps boatmen at each bridge in
order to rescue the unfortunate.
Miss KATE FIELD is the daughter of
J. NJ. Field, of st. Louis, a journalist
and dramatic critic, who married an
actress, Miss Riddle. Miss Field is their
only child. She was born in st. Louis.