The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1880-06-02
LIVING BY TH',l WITS.

took me about thirty miles from home,
and kept me there until l had just time
to catch the last return train. Although
knew every inch of the road, yet had
somehow made false turn, the Consc-
auenee of which was that albeit made
more haste than was prudent to retrieve
lost time, had the modification OF see
ing the red light of the tail-lamp of the
train pass out of sight around sharp
curve of the line. Coming to a dead
stand, | said Ito myself, imagined):
"There! Pm in for it now. What is
to be done"
"Make the best of a bad job, sir" said
voice ut my elbow in cheerful tone.
Looking round, saw a middle-aged
and kindly-looking farmer, who seemed
to regard my loss OF the train with COM
passion; for before | had time to reply.
he said: "There's many worse case eX-
isting at this moment than yours, friend;
the saddest part of it is the disappoint-
ment of friends at home."
"That's the very thing troubles me-" |
said; "for | know ] can not wire my loss
of train to them"
"Bring your mind to your circum-
stances, friend" was the philosophical
advice of my newly-found acquaintance:
Then added: "as for yourself, you need
not be long in suspense; for if you can
put up with such accommodation as my
house affords, you are welcome to 1t.
What say yon?
Seeing that nothing better could be
done, I gratefully went with my friend
in need; ana in about ten minutes |
found myself at the door Of the moder-
stely-sizcd farmhouse of Mr.. Samuel
Pitchforth. As we were about to enter,
we almost stumbled over man in the
act of knocking at the door. He turned
ont to be broker from the market town
at which I had done business, about two
miles off, and had come respecting some
furniture which my host had spoken to
him about. 1t was not much past nine
o'clock; and as the newcomer had rid
den in light cart, he was not in haste
to return; so it was not long before we
all three were snugly seated in the farm
er's best room, chatting merrily.
'Tn tell you what, Pitchforth," said
the broker in q somewhat testy tone,
III have hardly got over the effects of Il
bad bargain l made the other day; it
affects my feelings vet, and will do so, l
guess, for day or two longer"
at must be something serious, Bar
ker," replied our host, Ito affect you so
much. hope it won't drive you into
the Insolvency Court"
'1'm not afraid of it's doing that"
laid Barker. ."It is not the amount of
money I've lost, as the thought that Pve
been done, that troubles me. l thought
that was up to every trick that could
be played OFT on me, and SO believed that
Icould not be taken in by the cleveres'
rogue; hence the fact that I've been
swindled does not sit lightly on my
mind, can tell you"
My host laughed heartily as he good
naturedly replied: "And so Jenny Bar
ker has met his match in craft and Gun
ning!" .t.
"He has indeed" said Barker, with ,
sigh and few reconciling mods of the
head.
"Come, come, Barker boy, cheer up!'
said Pitchforth; "even You may live ant
learn. But come; let us hear the tale O
Diamond cut Diamond, and l will sup
plement it by relating story of shar]
dealing in which l was lately con
cerned."
Barker, who was smoking his well
seasoned pipe, looked significantly tow
ard the table, where it was pretty clea
he had expected to see the usual accom-
paniments of well-to-do farmers social
ity; but as they did not meet his gaze, h
seemed ill-disposed to comply with ou
hosts request. 1t was also equally clea
that the latter had suffered temporar
lapse of memory; for uttering goot
natured exclamation, he asked me to b
kind enough 10 touch the bell at m
elbow. This was enough to put Barke
into good humor and a talking mood; fC
while the maid who answered the bel
was getting the decanter and glasses lai
on the table, the broker was reflling h
pipe with complacent face. When he Ina
got his pipe well a-going, he spoke as fo
lows:
II need not tell you, neighbor Pitcl
forth, that I am not so thin-skinned
some folks respecting what is calle
cheating the revenue; for if l can buy
bit of contraband on the sly, / scrup
not to do so; and as the case in hand
one Of that sort, you may be ready to So
that I am right served. Well, | am NJ
disposed to argue the point with you, b
will just tell you the story as it occurre
It was last market-morning. I was stan
ing at my door, looking down the stree
when man rushed past me into n
shop bearing small keg or barrel on h
ahoulder. Lifting it off and placing it
my counter, he said in much has'
"Friend, do me the favor Of letting th
stop here an hour or 50. 1t is coup
Of gallons of brandy which has not do
duty to the Queen. have brought
at the request Of gentleman who pl
missed to meet me here at ten o'cloe
I've been all through the market looki
for him, bu. have not found him.. Js
now got glimpse Of the excisems