Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1880-05-08
NUMBER 10.
PASSING SMILES.

pitai physician wnlie going LA TOunu-
mine" "Why, | ordered m.dicire
for ten" Yes. but one wouldn't take
it,"
WESTERN papers are discussing the
question, "Shall married women work -
Unless they do We suppose q good many
husbands Of the period will starve "a
death.
A MErTCAL journal tells of man liz.
ing five years with ball in his head.
eve known ladies to live twice a. ng
without anything bur balls in their
heads.
1T was delicate piece of sarcasm in
the bOarder who sent his landlady last
ever ing razor, neatly enclosed in 4
handsome silk-lined case, and labelled
Butter-knife."
A BEvY of Chicago girls, at a recent
wedding threw their slippers at the bride
on her departure on her bridal tour, for
luck. One of them hit her, and her
funeral occurred three days later.
The Irish people can eat the speech. s
made in this country over the W es. nor
yet make soup If the resolutions pass 4
oS Ihoo9'mCotiHkS. W"at 'Uty "dut IN
pork and pOta:Oes.-Detrot Free Press
THE members of the Derrick staff were
bluffng as to who had got off the bt st
lining during the week When it came
to the last man, he said he thought the
best thing he had got of was hn dirty
shirt.-OH City ID rrick.
WE said, the other day, GA million
n PQ Wi II III ic hov l.,
beggar in the same p'edicament, and
fOrty-seven n milliOnaires have called upon
us for an explanation. Oace for all, We
must say right h re that We haven.
time to fool with miliona res.
In little family discussion, the
other day, the madam remarked, some
what tartly: "When ! marry again.
:" suppose you will marry fool"
interrupted the husband. "Beg your
pardon" said she, 4" | will do nothing OF
the kind. Ipreftr change" the lord
and master wIlted.
AN exchange says: "There sre three
headless roOs;crs being exhibited in a
town in Indiana There are four head
less rOcsters being exhited in this city.
and the butcher sticks to it that they
are spring chickens and cheap at eight
cents pOund.-Feck's Mii,caukee Sun.
AN army officer is retired when he
goes out of service, and a wheel is re-
tired to 60 into service again. When Il
sheriff releases prisoner he loses posses-
sion of him, and when he releases
house he regains possession Of it, and
this is bowling old language of ours.
isn't it,"
We protest against the folly of this
senseless demand that the money Of the
land should be kept in circulation.
That's just the trouble with it; it circu.
lates too fast. What we are tryi ing to do
is to stop little of it right at the very
number where the carrier leaves our let
ters.-B Burlington Hawkeye.
MY knowledge of the .dip.omatic
service" said young Republican, lat
week, "is very slight. don't know
what an Envoy Extraordinary is"
but after the Londorers hal ,'aycd
poker with General Scherck few time.
they must have thought him an extra
ordinary envoy.
WHAT is home without a wife7"
asks the YOnkers Gazette. 1t is the din
ing room in the parlor, the coal bin in
the kitchen. the clean shirt in hiding, a
depot for soiIed clothes, a trysting place
for divorced stockings, a smoking fur
mace, . private pandemonium, cavern
OF profane rumblings, a lunatic asylum.
More?
"UNLEss you give me aid," said a
begssr to benevolent lady, II an,
afraid I shall have to resort to some
thing which l greatly dislike to do"
The lady handed him dollar and CON-
asked: What is it, popr
man, that / have saved yOu from7'
I" Work." was the mOurnful answer.
FAMOUS judge came late to court
One day in busy season,
Whercat his clerk, In great surprise
Inquired Of him the reason,
"a child was borp." His Honor said.
"An infant judge" ..oh. no." said he.
"As yet he's hut a crier."
WOMEN" says a literary journal,
|" live on love-" That may all be; but
We notice all that have the pleasure Of
our acquaintance linger around the
able three times day and get on the
outside Of an awful lot of beef sleak and
potatoes, as we'll as other substantial
articles of fOod.-E E7mird Sunday TEE
yrdm.
OTHER papers are busy telling what
they want to see. Thc Argo has two
wants. First, it wants to see show
which surpasses it, advertisement. Sec
,ndly, it wants, very much. to zee a
,cribbler who uses nom de plume, and
1on't use every exertion to let the pub
ic know his or her true name. The
Argo will sail good ways 10 see the
i rare and radiant" being who il satisfied
With the chosen nom de plume.
THE charity balls have been unusually
successful, and in many instances the
poor dress-maker has realized profit Of
s75 on one costume, and the poor tailo,
has been scarcely les fortunate. while
the pOer florist has had more orders for
s. boQuets than he could fill and the
poor livery men have had all their car
riages out all night at 81 an hour, and
ho roov cot. vov hos roa1;,aJ ~, ,,.,oI