The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1880-06-03
QartetD.
VARIETY SCRAPS.

The loafer Is a labor saving institution.
The fast kid wants to go it while he is young.
Something to add mire; A street sprinkler.
Does a water shed become an ice house in the
winter
The Frog Opera is a suitable one for leap year,
Sweating for ones daily bread is a pore way of
getting 1t,
A lady is always ready to recognize the looking
glass as her pier,
When one barber shaves another barber he
does not talk,
Nothing is wholly bad. Even a dark lantern
has It's bright side.
When a mans aft collar button comes off his
choler rises.
The Yonkers Statesman presumes that air cas-.
ties are built Of sunbeams and hererafters.
"vote as you are bought" is the motto Of a large
class Of Americans.
The loaier and the Wall street broker love to
get a corner on the street.
The good mother and the accessible slipper al.
ways make a spanking team.
II any one asks credit of a photographer he is
likely to get a negative answer.
circumstances alter cases, said the unsuccess.
full lawyer, "but nay case don't alter my cirCum'
stances"
Nature has had plenty Of experience and yet
she looks very weak in the spring.
A young Darwinian.-Jack Ito bis married sis.
ter). Hi Polly Look II Here's your baby
trying to walk on its hind legs I'LL"
Col King, a Texas cattle man, has a fence sew.
enty. five miles long, i~nclosing about 1877 square
miles, on which range ITO 600 beasts.
TWO men were sentenced at Limerick, Ireland,
to o months imprisonment for throwing eggs at
amateur actors during a performance.
In shooting a fly the more experienced blacksmith
uses a cloth instead Of a hammer, 1t is not 50
liable to damage the furniture.
About this time of year the intelligent compOs
itor is engaged In transmitting drives Of logs
into " droves Of hogs"
Authors are spoken Of as dwelling In attics, be,
cause so few OF them are able to live on their frs
story.
Reward Of Merit-The next pupil who spelled
chimney correctly was told by his teacher to &c
up one-but he didn't want to.
Two French Senators meet: ~ have just CONT
from the Senate. The sitting lasted three hours
"What passed p "Three hours"
There is a tide in the affairs OF men which
taken at the food, carries them over the dam
and don't you forgetit.
Woman is called mans better half, but she Il
not q half at all. When she holds a domestic
convention she eniorCes the two.thirds vote,
The puzzle blocks originated in Philadelphia
where the blocks Of houses are 80 much alikI
that a man Is puzzled to know when he get
home.
Statesmen are not afraid Of counterfeit money
They pass bad bills for the reason that 30 very few
OF them have common cents,
When, after the funeral, the eager cousins, anC
uncleu meet to hear the will read and to lear
how rich they are, and II is discovered that all tn
property 10 given to q church, the document be
comes considered as q will o the Wsp.
"overworked Merchant" asks; How shall
contrlVe to get my mind otfSSmy business p We'll
II you try to set a rat'trap, in a very short tim
you'll forget all about your business, and be won
doring bow in Hades the thing can bite so.
Two fishermen were talking. II have found
splendid place for fsh recently-a new plac
where they bite like eVerythingl' "Ah, hav
you2 Where Is It 2" IA little above sevres.
was there yesterday" what did you catch
THE SIX forty train coming home"
Referring to the recent creation Of peers, tn
London Truth observes that ut is not likely the
the absurdity Of granting hereditary titles will
long survive" and adds that while English pee
pie often sheer at the bought titles on the Cont
nent, they are, in fact, just as much sold to thOs
who purchase them by expenditure at election
for Parliament