The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1880-03-11
CURRENT ITEMS.

CURRENT ITEMS.
Between two evils, choose neither
N. o. RcayMse.
Not only is Lord Beaconsfield's
sight failing him, says the Detroit Free
Press, but also his foresight.
The writer who uses italic letters to
show where he has made a pun has q
very poor opinion of his own jokes.
"A subscriber to the Heralrs Irish
relief fund exclaims: "May a mouse
never leave your cupboard with tear
in his eye"
The city of Norwich carries weight
in the Connecticut Legislature. Its two
representatives weigh collectively five
hundred and tifty-two pounds.
Nothing new about this spelling re-
form. Chaucer practised it. In 1868
he wrote:
Full vel she sang the service devine
Entuned in her nose full swetely.
-Curiously as many people think tho
world is made, it is nevertheless true
that in the long run simple honesty has
q better chance than craft and cunning.
IN. Y. Herald.
William E. Dafo, of Trenton, Ont,
died recently from eating cabbage on
which paris green had been sprinkled.
Four other members of the family were
i'll from the same cause.
The judiciary of Rhode Island can
not try the case against Zachariah Chat
fee, Trustee of the Sprague estate, be-
cause such case requires two Judges,
and only one in the State is not person
ally interested.
The Mississippi House of Represent
atives has passed bill securing to
married women the right to dispose Of
their separate estates without the con-
sent and independently of the wishes Of
their husbands.
Two years ago a Savannah dog
took trip to Augusta on one of the
river steamers, when he was lost and
forgotten. The other day that dog re-
appeared at his old masters store, and
was recognized and reinstated.
The consciousness that you are right
will make you happy, even when all the
world thinks you wrong, and the con-
sciousuess that you are wrong will make
you miserable, even when all the world
thinks you right.-N Y. Herald
AN Arizona man, while digging a
grave in which to bury the body of his
wife, struck valuable silver lode.
Thereupon he remarked, "Well, I
reckon Polly 'llkeepif this weather con-
tinues," and kept on digging. To-day
he is a rich man.
AT Pittsburgh, Pa, a few days ago
two roughly-clad individuals, William
Penn and William Kelly, were seen by
two boys walking along Tunnel street
and quarreling with each other. Both
were evidently somewhat under the in
fuence of liquor. Suddenly Kelly, who
occupied the position nearest the curb,
whipped out a knife and plunged it
into his companions side, at the same
time twisting the blade in the wound.
Penn called for the police and became
unconscious. Five minutes afterward
he died. After doing the mischief KEEL
ly quietly wiped off the bloody knife,
stuck it in his pocket and walked away,
evidently we'll satisfied with his work.
Canada is getting to be swallow
tail country. A delegation OF farmers
waited on the Marquis of Lorne, not
long since, and Montreal paper is hor-
rifed to find that they did not wear
claw-hammer coats. The Montreal
sheet pathetically informs a shocked
community that the bold ruralists APP
preached Vice-Royalty in common
morning coats. OF course well-wishers
of the Dominion on this side of the line
will refuse to believe the appalling story
until further proof is forthcoming. We
will very likely be informed next that
they had not white ties and kid gloves.
What an opinion the Governor must
have of the state of agriculture in that
country.-Detroit Free Press.
Concerning the obstinacy of the
twelfth juror in the Hayden trial the
Waterbury Comm american remarks:
"a Prospect citizen was in town
Wednesday, and in conversation he al
luded to Mr.. Hotchkiss, the lone jury
man. and said: Prospect people who
know that man were confident from the
first that an agreement of the Hayden
jury would be impossible; had the other
eleven been for conviction, Hotchkiss
would have been for acquittal. In town
or school meetings, when he has been
present, it has invariably been his GUS
tom to keep silent till he saw what the
bias of the meeting was relative to any
question under consideration; then he
would take up arms with the minority
and fight and wrangle against the pop
ular conclusion. He has made more
fuss and trouble in town and society
matters than any other man."
One of the fastest tricks played upon
shop-keepers was successfully per-
formed at Cincinnati grocery the other
evening. A woman entered and ordered
q pound of the best coffee. She carried
a jar under her arm, and when the gro
ceryman was about to pour the coffee
in paper bag the customer told him to
dump it into the jar instead. The man
did so, the female leaning over the
counter and still holding the jar under
her arm, with the bottom of the vessel
concealed. When she had received the
coffee the female put her hand in her
pocket, and with well-feigned ex-
preston of annoyance cried: 81 do de.
clare. have left my purse at home!
I'll just set the jar of coffee down Oh
the counter here while run in home
and get the money" She placed the
jar on the counter and went out. but
she failed to return, and when the store
keeper picked up the jar he was sur
prised to find that it did not contain any
COTE, and that the bottom had been
Knocked out. 1t then flashed upon his
mind that when he poured the coffee in
the jar it ran through into a bag con-
cealed by the female sharper.
SPEAKING of goodness calls to mind
an incident that happened in one of our
shops this week, showing again the
poor side of frail humanity. A man
from a neighboring village, wealthy and
well known as generous giver to va
rious institutions, and yet close-fsted
Al L.