The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1880-02-27
The Church Road.

On the road once more with Lebanon fad
ing away in the distance, fat passenger drum
ming idly on the window pane, the cross pas
scngcr reading General Grants Tour Around
the World and wondering why Green's
August Flower" should be printed above the
doors Of "a Buddhist temple at Benares."-
To me comes the brakeman, and seating him
self on the arm of the seat says:
Il went to church yesterday"
"Ycs?" / said, with that interested inilec-
ton that asks for more. And what church
did you attend 2"
(Which do you guess" he asked.
"Some union mission church ?" haZardcd
Nav" he said, 81 don't like to run on these
branch roads very much. | don't often go to
church, and when | do, want to run on the
main line, where your run is regular and you
go on schedule time and don't have to wait on
connections | don't like to run on branch
Good enough but don't like it,"
s"Episcopal?" guessed.
Limited express" he said, AL palace cars
and two dollars extra for Il seat fast time and
only stop at the big stations. Nice line but
too exhaustive for Il brakeman. Alltrain men
in uniform, conductors punch and lantern
sivcr-platcd, and no train boys allowed
Then the passengers are allowed to talk back
at the conductor, and it makes them too free
and easy No, | couldn't stand the palace
car. Rich road though. Don't otter hear of
a receiver being appointed for that line
Some mighty nice people travel on it, too"
"Univcrsalist?" | suggested.
Broad gauge" said the brakeman; 'does
too much complimentary business. Every
body travels on Il pass. Conductor doesn't
get fare once in fifty miles. Stops at all flag
stations and won't run into anything but Il
union depot. No smoking cars on the train.
Train orders are rather vague though, and the
train men don't get along well with the pas
sengcrs. No, didn't go TO the Univcrsalist,
though know some awfuly good men who
run on that road"
"Presbytcrian y | asked
Marrow gauge 2" said the brakeman
pretty track, straight as rule tunnel right
through mountain rather than go around it;
spirit level grade; passengers have to show
their tickets before they get on the train
Mighty strict road, but the cars are little
narrow; have to sit one in a seat and no room
in the aisle to dance. Then there's no stop
over tickets allowed; got to go straight
through 10 the station you're ticketed for,
or you can't get ON at all When the cars
full, no extra coaches; cars built at the shops
to hold just SO many and nobody else allowed
ON. But you don't often hear of an accident
on the road It's run right up to rules"
"Maybe you Joined the Free Thinkers ?" |
said
"Scrub road" said the brakeman, "dirt road
bed and no ballast no time card and no train
dispatcher All trains run wild and every en-.
ginccr makes his own time, just ms he plcases
Smoke if You want to kind of go-as-you-
please road Too many side tracks, and every
switch wide open all the time, with the switch
man sound asleep and the target lamp dead
out Get on as you please and get off when
you want to. Don't have to show your tickets,
and the conductor isn't expected To do any
| thing but amuSe the passengers. No, sir, |
was offered pass, but don't like the line |
| don't like To travel on n road that has no ter
minus Do you know, sir, asked division
| superintendent where that road run to, and
| he said hoped to diei if he knew asked him
| if the general superintendent could tell me,
and he said he didn't believe they had a gen
cral superintendent, and if they had, he didn't
| know anything more about the road than the
| passengers. i asked him who he reported to,
and he said nobody" | asked Il conductor
who he got his orders from and he said he
| didn't take orders from any living man or dead
ghost And when asked the engineer who
| he got his orders FROM he said he'd like to see
any body give him orders, he'd run that train
to suit himself or he'd run ii into the ditch
| Now you see, sir, Pm railroad man, and |
| don't care to run on a road that has no time
makes no connections, runs nowhere and has
no superintendent. 1t may be all right, but
I've raiiroaded too long to understand it,"
did you try the Methodist" | said.
Now you're shouting" he said, with some
| enthusiasm. mice road, ch ?" Fast time and
plenty of passengers. Engines carry power
of steam, and don't you forget it; steam gauge
shows hundred and enough all the time
| Lively road when the conductor shouts all
aboard you can hear him to the next station
Every train lamp shines like II headlight
Stopover checks giving on all through tickets
passenger can drop off the train as often us he
likes do the station two or three days and hoE
Oh the next revival train that comes thunder
ing along. Good, whole-soulcd conductors
amt road in the country where the passcn
gers feel more at home No passes; every
passenger pays full traffic rates for his ticket
Weslayanhouse air brake on all trains, too
pretty safe road, but didn't ride over it yes
terday.
Maybe you went TO the Congregations
church ?" l said.
Popular road said the brakeman, ian ole
road too: one of the very oldest in this coun
try. Good road bed and comfortable cars
Well managed road too; directors don't in
terfere with division superintendent and trair
orders. Roads mighty popular, but it's pretty
independent too. See, didn't one of tn,
division superintendent down east discon
tinue one of the Oldest stations on this lint
two or three years ago? But it is mighty
pleasant road to travel on. Always has sucl