Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1880-06-07
THAT BURGLARY
And How the Rattle Ratified and the Bel
Rang and the iSird Sang; and the
Police Came Not.

And How the Rattle Ratified and the Bel
Rang and the tstrd Sang; and the
Police Came Not.
There was plenty of fun around the
neighborhood of Mrs. Wiley's residence Oh
the night of that burglary, but the pity OF
it is that that there was no audience there
to enjoy it, and ca ch performer was too in.
tent upon the proper performance OF his
part in the play to appreciate it as
whole. Our alert and amiable police even
were not on hand, and the loud racket of
Mrs. WiIcy's policeman rattle in vain for
half an hour went out upon the still night
air. Nobody came. Our gallant
friend Jake Long first appeared upon the
field, the other neighbors hearing the
great noise indistinctly in their dreams
and thinking it was anything but
but the cry of distress that it re-
ally was; all but our friend Lyte, of
the Eraminer, who listened to the exciting
sounds from his window and viewed the
departing footsteps of the three burglars
with calm delight that lie was the only
of which he went back to his dear couch
and refrained from going after further
particulars. Our esteemed friend Reuben
Baer, of the Volksfreund, was more alert in
hold and afforded very pictur-
esque sight as he stood on the front
portico of his residence, and swung to
and fro his great dinner bell, with great
sweep of the arm and undulation of body
decently attired in flowing robe of night
The din and the apparition would almost
have sufficed to summon the hosts of
heaven to succor, but it didn't even fetch
a Lancaster policeman. Next door, at the
residence of Mr.. SHREDDER, young gentle
men slept whose heart would have led him
to the reliefof troubled womanhOod where
ever it was to be found, but, though
he awoke, it seemed to him that it was
with the sound IN his ears of "dulcet
symphonies and voices sweet" and he
came not. But he hied himself to his
chamber window and drank in the sweet
tones of the big watchman's rattle, and
thought as he listened that he recognized
the note of southern bird that he had
heard in his travels and which was sig
nifying its loneliness away, from its home
and its mate, with these strange cries.
SO he sought to initiate the cry and to
call the bird 1t would not come; and
then to his active fancy it occurred to
think that he had heard that birds might
be attracted into room by the reflection
of a mirror thrown upon the outside foil
age, and he took down his looking glass
and exposed it to the window in every con-
ceivablG angle of reflection, and still
the bird came not. And all this time Mrs.
Wiley's rattle was sounding i'll her tired
Ii md, while the southern bird was warb-
linz in our young friends ears and he was
whistlilg to it and calling it and excitedly
seeking its capture and then came in the
baritone ofthc Baer dinner bell with noise
to startlc the dead. The story does not
tell us what sort of variation OH the song
of the southern bird this was understood
to be, but it may be imagined that it was
about this time that Mr.. Schroeder entered
our young friend room to find him engaged
in his arduous effort to capture and comfort
that bird rs he sang to it with sore throat
out of his chamber window, holding in
his tired arms the enticing mirror.
The bird disappears. The rattle ceases.
The dinner bell stops. The army of in
vasion gallantly led at a late hour advances
to the assault to find that the burglars,
having ears to h, ar and knowing the proper
significance of the noise, had chosen to
leave by the back window. They were
lacking in politeness perhaps, but abounded
in good sense. Sense is a good thing to
hive and legs. Our policeman ought to
have legs. and stay awake to use them.