Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1880-04-21
lFrom Blackwood's Magazine.l
THE PHILOSOPHERS BABY.

[ had been considering for about q
ear whether I should marry Wln1fred
ANYWAY, when / heard that she was en-
ICED to the Philosopher. Why did she
,cept him? 1t is true that he is both
laginative and critical, but faculties
ercised In the formation of psychology
Il hypothesis, and the laboring de-
ruction of those of ones neighbor do
t usually rouse the sympathy of a
light and beautiful girl, who is more
to live than to think about life. He
certainly handsome, but as certainly
clothes are barbarous. His trousers
Mt keep their shape for day, and his
It's are never new. If he notices the
in, he opens an umbrella which might
I've served as an Intellectual protection
the time of the deluge; if he finds out
at it is cold, he assumes a garment
hich might have been the everyday
,at of Methuselah. His manners are as
range as his appearance. Hemay often
seen walking In the park at the fash
liable hour with a far-off look in his
'es. and his hat thrust back as if to
ssen the external pressure on his active
.ain; more rarely you may hear him
L W
Tough Piccadilly is the last place in
hich man should allow himself to be
Enthusiastic. In short, though he is a
ne friend, he is an uncomfortable ac-
uaintance; and his volcanic utterances,
tier long periods of calm contemplation,
suse such shocks to ones nerves as
ould be conveyed to the Sunday citi-
IN by the eruption of Primrose Hill.
ut If it was odd that the beautiful Win
red Hanway should marry my friend,
was yet more odd that he should marry
~ one. There were no topics more
.rtain, to excite an explosion in the
lilosopher than the excessive popula-
IN Of the country, and the wholesome
'litude of the thinker. "How," he
ould fercely ask, ''can man think
fectually on fundamental subjects, who
compelled by the despicable circum-
ances of his life to exhaust his analyti-
faculty in considering how to pay his
ltcher and when to buy his Goals? [
Il you, sir, it's better to starve with
Id and hunger than to debase ones no.
est part to game of skill with grasp
grocer" Again and again [ had
ard him declaim in this perposterous
Ihion; and after all, he was going to
altar like any other victim, and would
ubtlessly take house upon his back
th the docility of a snail.
l could not solve the problem; I would
give it up. So, full of the determi-
ton to drag Diogenes out of his tub,
stepped round the corner to offer my
ngratulations. My friend was in his
Idly apparently writing, really eating
i'll pen. He rose at me with rush.
ung my hand till it ached, and blushed
her uncomfortably. Congratulations
the curse of the Briton. Whether
is offering them or receiving them,
IS generally obliged to take refuge in
ernittent handshaking, and most of
sentences tail off into grunts and
ans. But on this occasion it was
lent that the philosopher had some
lg ready to say, and was nervously
ious to say it. Indeed I had hardly
| more than "My dear fellow, I don't
when I really am SO aw-
sglad I it'sin every way
such satisfactory, you know <
ally do wish all possible, and all that
of thing you know, when he burst
With speech so auently delivered,
I knew [ was not his earliest visitor
{; morning. "Of course it's taken
by surprise" he said, "as I knew it
Id; but the truth is, that I have been
king of it for a long time, and [ am
81 am right" Here tined to get in
impression of wonder at his new no.
i of duty, but he was bent on being
of the matter, and hurried on to his
i
am sure that, instead OF increasing
domestic worries, my marriage will
nsfer them in body to my wife; and,
ondly. when I consider the vast num-
of fools that are every day born into
world, I am terrified by the picture
What the next generation will be, If
thinkers of this are TO be without
cessors.' Having discharged his rea-
in this wise, tue orator stood blink
at me as if he feared dissent, but I
too astounded by his magnificent
acity to reply. Slowly look of
ee stole back into his face, pleasant
tdawned In his eyes, and the promise
smile played at the corner of his
18th. HIS remarkable huency was
2, and indeed his voice sounded quite
: when he said: "Johnny, you
know what an angel she Is. A
broke In upon me. "Philoso-
:" said, 81 believe you ale going
married because you fell in love ?"
erhaps you are right, " said the phil
her.
ter the wedding the Philosopher and
wife went abroad for an indefinite
I'd, and their friends heard but little
lem. He wrote to nobody, and she
OF write to me- Yet there were oc-
al rumors. Now they were breath
he keen ar of the Angadine, now
to the chestnuts and vines of
iavenna; now he was lashing him.
frenzy over the treasures of Rome;
was gazing with sweet northern
ross the glowing splendor of the