New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1879-11-03
BOURBON BALL1DS,-No. Sc.
TIE SONG OF TIE snlRK.

THE SONG OF rHT sHfRK.
With fingers nky and black.
With OPTICS rheumy and rel,
A yOungster sat IN bis thiru-noor oack
Pushing his pen ahead.
Scratch! Scratch! Scratch
He seemed TO lac proud OF the work,
And still, M u voice that yon Couldn't match,
lie sang the Song OF the Sink.
Paste! Paste, Paste
Till there was no more in the cup;
Paste, Pastel Paste.
Til his fingers were all stack up
And o. heard him saw.
ii can't elect nv man.
know that this Is election day -,
And III bother them al can "
scratchl Scratch, Scratch!
II flattered his wllfui whin.
Scratch Scratch Scratch!
That's what was the matter win htm.
Growl and grumble and snarl.
Suarl and grumble aud Growi,
Till over the ballots he fell asleep
And dreamed that he was an Owl.
And still he piled the paste,
And scratched and scratched the more.
Till everything seemed to be defaeed
On Dreamlands infinite shore.
in half an hour he woke,
Amid a clamorlng crowd,
And leaned on his desk aud boldly spoke,
Addressing them thus aloud;
20. men with sisters dear
q. men with mothers-in-law
The way to prove your courage here
Is TO hunt and find flaw.
ScIatchl Scratch! Scratch!
To that the freeman resorts,
And he never should vote for any man
That any one else supports!
"scratchi Scratch! Scratch!
Cornell is not, ween,
The man would choose MS a candidate,
He runs with the state machine
| wasn't consulted at all
IL almost makes me weep
o. Heavensi That brains should be so dear,
And blab and CAB so cheap
cornell Is well enough;
In isn't that YOU see
But / want no majority vote
To tVrannize over me.
II there were "a many candlcatet
As there are voting men,
We needn't scratch a ballot ~ ~,
For all would be suited then F"
In spoke a man in the crowd
And cred " Sir Scratoher! saF !
Why didn't Won 90 TO the primal hrs1
And get 'em TO vote your way
Why didn't you rally there
Its doors were open VIDE
And put your mau upon the track,
And set our man aside
80. don't Of Caucus talk
That phantom OF grisly bone, ,r,;h,s n,.cs ,
Said the ScratcheT; u hate the terripie place. )
wasn't there, own
wasn't there own.
For was too busy that day;
Invent with the girls out ON the lawn
had TO play croquet
"Scratchl Scratchi Patchi
q take these blots from me
And vote them all, and beat CORNELL
And prove that yon are free
q. take them Don't refuse!
When one a choice has got
OF evils, IL is wise to choose
The worst one OF the lOl
"Too late I" the other said.
You sentimental coon. -
We,ye been and voted for Cornell,
All of Ms this forenoon u
"Deceiyed ~ the ScTatcher erred,
And hustled from of the shelf,
4. H. getting late but III smash the state
III 20 and vote myself"
Paste Patch Scratch!
All over the ballots face. -,
And he wrote John Doe and Richard Roe "
And ran 10 the poill g-place
"Inever will be bulldozcd.
On independence dOte p ,y.
Tbent ne Ind ge remarked, The polls are closed
The Scratcher had lost his vote!
With fingers inky and black.
with optics heavy and red.
The urlQ still rooSts III bis three-palr-pack'
Where oceans Of ink are shed.
Scratch! Scratch! Scratch
lie likes the beggarly work
Ia lives up there in "A humble meme,
I'M IL he the regular train could dlicn,
rsyonid MAKE him feel exceedingly rlcn
Iowever he can't there's vital hitch;
nd 80 in a voice Of dOlorous pltch.
nd winning nasal utteraDce, wnicn ,..., >,
hould reach the ears Of George william ana sicn'
n0u'N He sings tile Song Of the Shirk.