The New Orleans daily Democrat. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1877-1880, 1879-08-17
THE GOOD BOY AT THE PICNIC.
How Much More the Bad Boy Enjoys Himself.
Detroit Free Press ]


The good boy comes home from the picnic
clean discouraged and badly mashed. Indeed,
he is often brought home dead The bad boy
has whooping old time from the very out
set, and returns home cbock full OF figs and
candy and enthusiasm to go again. When
the good boys dad has made up his mind to
take the family to a picnic on some shady
island or distant shore, the boy doesn't jump
up and declare that he won't wear white pants
or that he is bound to go barefooted, or that
he must have half q dollar in cash and a
revolver. On the contrary. the good boys
chin ID at rest; he Is In his mothers hands,
and he trusts her with all arrangements re-
garding his sacred person and property Be
EMMY addressed by his devoted mother, and
the address is accepted, adopted and filed
by his respected father. who was a boy once
himself:
Sunday school picnic, and want to say few
words to you. IL you lose your hat on the
cars I'll box your ears till they ring? II you
don't stay with me and your father I'll lick
you before all the folks Ii you sit on the
grass and stain those pants you know what
you'll get! Ii you dare to go In boat. go
into the water, shoot q pistol, climb tree,
wrestie boy, or tense your father to buy
candy or lemonade LII take your hide off and
hang IL out on the fence the very minute we
get home!
That's the music the good boy has to face
when be starts for picnic and il he doesn't
start out with a smiling face and buoyant
step he may get his ears cuffed before he
reaches the depot. Ii any one has to stand
up In the cars it is the good boy. II there are
any cinders flying they fall on the good boys
white pants and hat and lodge In his eyes. II
any one falls flat on the platform or into the
mud at the getting off place 1t is the good boy,
while the bad boy, who has come all the way
on the roof Of the car. having dead-loads Of
fun, meets with not the slightest accident as
he ascends; On the contrary, he is almost
certain to find basket OF luncheon which no
one claims, and he runs his chance of picking
up gOld-headed canes, bottles OF ginger ale,
pocket-books and watches On the way over to
the grove.
The good boys father, on reaching the
grove, buys himself a glass OF lemonade to
get the dust out Of his throat and follows it
with dish Of Ice cream to cool his system.
The good boy himself isn't supposed TO have
any dust in his throat or any system to cool
off II he is very thirsty he can drink water
provided his mother doesn't catch him at it.
The bad boy skins up tree, hangs by his
heels, finds a birds nest, eats slippery elm
and June berries, and the good boy must sit
On q cracker box and watch the family UNI
with a draught OF currant wine, and his
father takes some ginger ale to prevent sun
stroke, and then retires to shady spot to
smoke a cigar. If the good boy feels like
squandering the old-fashioned penny he has
had ia his bank for seven long years, one
look from his mother freezes him to that
cracker box SO fast that pony couldn't draw
him off.
The bad boy has at least fifty cents to spend
as he plea5es. He rows a boat, he goes In
swimming, be throws stones, he swings on q
wild grape vine, he climbs hills and rocks and
slides down banks and although some deacon
with face as solemn as the garnet window in
q deserted tannery predicts that he will be
killed or drowned, he is the Iveiest one of the
lot when the party makes ready for the home
ward trip.
Instances have been known where good
boy evaded his mothers eye and bought
pop corn ball, but it always choked him. IT
he dared to climb a tree he fell and broke his
arm. Ii he got hold of peanuts or lemonade
he was made dreadfulIy sick. II he went
near the water be was drowned A good
boys parents should and do take a heap Of
comfort at a picnic. The good boy himself
might as well take seat In graveyard and
try to be heopy with a broken penny whistle.
Up to the time 0f taking the cars for home he
may have behaved himself in such manner
Wy 70 win a word or two of praise from his
mother. but he Is sure to jam his hat, break q
suspsnder, lose his handkerchief or do some
thing On the Way home to Induce the old lady
to remark as she reaches home, and removes
her bonnet:
,,,' Now, young man, you step out here.
u hlngs have come to a pretty pass if we can't
lake you anywhere with us without your cut
tlng up So as to disgrace us forever! Stop
that biubbering, sir, and let me say that the
louder you holler the harder shall lick! J"