The Red Cloud chief., 1879-05-01
TIE PRIESTS PIG.
AN OLD STORY MODERSrZED.

LIE III 1iNs
AN III TORY ODERNfZED.
HE Reverence sat I'm his latticed box,
Whose curtains folded In convolutions;
twas Lent: and his people gathered In HOOKS
To tell their sins and seek absolutions.
So the good priest sat on his cushioned chair
Through zeal for them, and no other reason,
In order that ali in his parish might snare
The blessed fruits Of the holy season.
Sinner and saint
Each told his complaint;
How he failed I'm virtue, Increased In vice
(>eeing the good he preferred the evn),
And the pastor gave each his best ADVICE
And bade him go and beware the devil.
His Reverence possessed q character
Whose oddities were its only beauties,
And his daily mass and his ONCE were
The whole of his sacerdOtal dutie Z.
He was innocent of that gift OF speech
Called eIoquence by the kind reporter;
hazard the guess he seldom would preach.
Except when collection lists grew shorter,
Had not the rules
of clerical schools
Made preaching incumbent. At all events
His sermons were brief and few In NUMBER,
And whatever they lacked in eloquence
They never failed in producing slumber'
His Reverence held quite a nice estate.
A cottage house with numerous gables,
Whose roof was covered with shingles OF
slate,
Fine meadow lands and extensive stables,
Inc DdSiOfr tTDtttT WIS plssSs NV o'SSns
His stylish buggy was never dirty.
1t was even said that during the week
The pastors record was under thirty;
His sheep and cows
Were allowed to browse
The clover that grew in the meadow arn,-
Through which a rivulet ran and spnrted;
Were suffolk pigs he had just imported.
These lived I'm a house his Reverence made
To keep them safe from thievish marau-
ders:
IL was said he followed the joiner's trade
Before ne studied for holy orders!
Bnt this was whispered to few Alone.
With caution to keep IL from their neigh
For the pastor feared, were it widely known,
1t might prejudice his sacred labOrs.
And morn and night
Did the priest delight,
When his mars was said or his ONCE READ,
To bring Az armful of red -topped clover,
And, throwing it into his model shed.
To count his pigs as they turned 1t over.
One morning when, I'm the usual way,
His Reverence came for their salutation,
The vigil IL was of our Lady's day,
GabrieI's feast of Annunciation;
In hfs hands he carried two iron pots
Wherein hot water and meal was Missing,
He summoned them cheerily TO their lots,
When, loi and behold you one was missing.
In hole and nook
Did the pastor look,
TIL he tore his cassock and soiled his wig;
And when he found twas the best was
Then he cussed the rascal who stole hts pig,
And hoped he'd choke if he made it bacon.
They said his Reverence lost his wits
To find his pig was in truth distracted;
He his servant and gave MIN nts'
And drove the whole of the house dis
tracted.
He called the printer and bade him rig
An advertisement OF continuation.
That nnIoss tho -entn1rat hrnnnhf hack hfS
He'd never witness his souls salvation.
tear the thief
Had little belief
In future existence in heaven or hell,
And read the threat with ungodly laughter,
For the pastor cursed him with bell and book,
But never heard of his pig thereafter.
s. far. so good. We will simply state here
The pig was eaten, his bones were rotten.
We may add that Time had advanced a year,
And the scandalous theft was nigh forgot
When the Lenten season of prayer and fast
Came On in order of due succession,
And the theft of the pastors pig at last
Became a matter OF right confession.
With tears and fears,
The culpfit appears,
After long delays, for the dreadful sin
Had made the wight OF his faith uncertain;
But his turn has come, and he enters in
The little box, and adjusts the curtain.
"Father," he says. "I am guilty of theft"
The good priest covered his nose and blew
it;
He was hard of hearing upon the left,
And the willy rascal fully knew it.
"And I've brought the value OF what 1 stole;
want your Reverence to receive it,
And l crave your blessing upon my soul,
That the guilt of theft may thereby leave
it."
With that he thrust
Through the bars of rust
A golden eagle; but the priest said "nay,"
With kindly smiles for penitent sorrow;
lou must find the person from whom you
say
You stole the goods, and restore to-mor.
row."
FEATHER, I found him." the penitent groans;
Offered him gold, this very same token,
Told him my sorrow i'm pitiful tones,
How with remOrse my spirit was broken;
He wouldn't accept it. but nodded his head,
Father, whenever l tried to explain it."
" If such be the case" the confessor said,
Nothing prevents you, my son, to retain
it;
But for the theft,
That no sin be left,
You will say ten pafers, beside your bed,
This week, for the souls L. purgafOry."
The penitent promised, and often said
He told no lie but q well made story.
-Bost0n Post.