New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1879-01-29
Dying In Paris.

have, pictured something about the ex-
pense Of living in Paris. Few of US
say anything about the expense of dy-
ing here. would earnestly commend
to all visitors here to postpone their
dying until they get further on in the
world. A man is " ruined for life'' if
he dies here. It is the most expensive
place in Europe to shuttle off this NOR
tai coil. Don't do it. Live in spite of
the doctor, and his aids-de-camp, the
vertfacateurs DIES deces, the funeral fur
nishers, the cemetery vampires, and
the endless accessories that demand
endless francs. Tho expenses to bury
one dead man in Paris in a day would
comfortably support a. whole family of
four persons in America for six months
alive and kicking" Tho red tape,
the black cloth, the fuss and the feath-
ers in the most modest style will absorb
nearly $500. From, the hour that Death
comes in the house until he goes out
again Mammon is actively dancing at
tendance upon him. / am not sur.
prised people dread to die. l begin to
feel that way myself the longer I live
AASAo" 4 AAo N0g0AAS " OuONO OXpcu60Ss
however serious the subject may be in
evory aspect, present nevertheless
some amusing traits. For example,,
When in the bill Of items you see
" tears, fifteen francs" weepers, ten
francs" and regrets, twenty-five
frances" you are inclined to laugh.
When you see sliding scale Of grief
represented by social classes and pomp
and show, empty carriages and mourn
full sham. you are forced to q smile.
When you get those big sheets of letter
paper, lettre de taire part. with solemn
black borders and the polite sentence
OF invitation done in splendid -four
ishes of lively photographic letters; and
when you see long list Of names of
family relatives and friends, also beau
tifully aourished, you are amazed with
this document being so Historically yer.
bose, humorous and jokishly inclined,
for frequently some Of tho possessors Of
these names are thousands of miles
away and perfectly ignorant Of tho
death OF tho incurred ones. I could
all = couple Of columns OF the San
with details of lies Pompes Fune-
bus" wholesale and ready-made
burying and Notwithstanding estab-
lishment at La Villette, that has q mo-
nopOly of doing the dead business"
It does "a roaring trade,'' and divides
handsome annual profits to the share.
holders, in sums Of millions Of francs.
1t is an excellent institution, combin-
ing system and promptness to mar
velous degree, and employing thou
sands Of professional mourners''-
fearful personagcs ready-madc or to
order. The building alone at La Viii
lette is larger than any public ediice
in Baltimore, and has every appliance,
iron. nearly one thousand saddened
black horses to millions OF i.nmor.
telles. THAT may be required for every
grade Of funeral. The men arc trained
by periodical lessons in tic various ex.
prcssions Of = the depths Of grief
suitable for funerals of high and low
degree. and though they are provcrbial
jOkers among themselves, smile or
cheerful expression IF face while on
duty would involve immediate dismis.
sal. The IN astcr Of ceremonies,
or 0rdynnntcur, is dramatic per
sonage, dressed like the Speaker
Of the British House Of Commons,
or superb turnkey in black, with q
massive steel chain and round cape, in
addition to-: lis black silk stockings,
patent leather shoes and bright steel
buckles; cutaway coat and general
court costume. He moves about with
more ease and grace and more i'm