The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1879-02-20
Persons Aud Things.
Firm friends-Partners.

Firm friends-Partners.
A loan exhibition can be seen at any
pawnbroker's window.
The new born babe is the creature of
suck-em stances.
A bent pin on chair is the turning
point of many boys career.
Dancing has been introduced into the
army. Probably you have heard of its
quad drills
Young ladies think they Miss it by not
it IN being married.
The grocer offered him a frozen ham,
but he said he'd rather not take the cold
shoulder from any one.
"Better be a nobody than sombody,"
groaned dull scholar, as he poured over
a column of figures
"Train wrecked she hisses, as she blum
deringly stumbled upon the long expands
of dress in the crowded ballroom.
Probably the happiest combination in
all this wide world, during these merry
winter days, is half amince pie with boy
around it.
Probably the best man in this world,
and the luckiest, is old Mr.. Tilden. He
does all his wickedness by substitute.
The Duke of Connaught's marriage to
Louisa Margaret of Prussia will be cele-
brated with great magnifcence at Windsor
on March 13.
The undertaken smiled serene. Because
he knew she would aspire. To light with
blazing kerosene. The slow, delinquent
kitchen fire.
"What does transatlantic mean, mamma?
Across the Atlantic. child. Hold your
tongue, and ask no more questions. Their
does transparent mean a cross mamma?
When a boy does something funny and
you laugh at it, he will inyaiable keeI
doing it twenty or thirty times more til
you have to knock him down with some
thing.
The Chinese Encyclopedia meets lone
felt want; no family should be without it
1t is published in Pekin. and has only
1920 volumes. Price, 81 500.
That was ghastly joke that a sinfu
townsman played on stranger whom hs
promised to introduce to rich planter
and then took him around and presented
him to the leading undertaken.
Tongue can not tell the words or express
the astonishment of the crippled soldier il
Connecticut who awoke to find his vie
using his wooden leg TO ponnd the beef
steak for breakfast.
"Mamma says it is not polite to ask fo
cake" said little boy "No," was the re
ply, Sit does not look we'll In little boys to
do So" "But," said the urchin, "she didn'
say 1 must not eat piece if you gave it to
me-"
Why are you looking at me SO intently
Alice? said Theodore. / was gazing a
vacancy, replied Alice, dreamily. and ye
there is a twinkle about her mouth tha
shows her appraisement of the young man
I'ye peanut in my pocket,
Emeline, Emeline;
Ill jerk the kernel from it's socket,
In due time, in due time;
To the theater I'll go.
On the floor the shells I'll throw,
Then Ill much the music slow,
Emeline, Emelihe.
81 say, my fren', can you thic) tell m!
where the other side of the street is?'
"Certainly-;ust across the way; why de-
yuu ask?" "Why (hic) because minute
ago I ask another fellow the same thing
and (hic) he said this was the other side
of the street"
Said jersey boy, "Ma, why do they
call that the pole starr" Because it is al
ways exactly over the pole. "Then, ma
that must be the top Of the circus" By
which the youth probably meant. if hs
! meant any thing, that this world is all q
feeting show.