Louisiana capitolian. (Baton Rouge, La.) 1879-1881, 1879-08-30

uiN poois 'i''N '''S "'N'" '"'
p'up, colorcd silk, replied: ave are
plumb out of that colors'
We are Offering chrome now to the
mother who doesn't think her baby nicer
than any other womans baby.
by not Staying at homc,' etc, he got
the State Convention to hold it's session
in Baton Rouge. Where's skunk
An old adage says Glove levels ALL"
So does tangIcioot whisky. Experience
has demonstrated this. grand old fact.
When the woodman shoulders his AK
and starts for tho woods, the Sugar
Planter is Of opinion that he does so
for q fell purpose.
GLOW dare Won swear before me "
yelled man at his son recently. GLOW
did ! know you wantc4 to cuss first :"
said tho spoiled urchin.
If mashed potatoes were worth three
dollars per plate, young ladies would
take them every time in preference to
icc-crcam when treated.
Josh Billings finds that tho man who
rides on the cars every day is glad to
have ono seat, but the man who rides
once year wants four seats.
One reason why tho Texas lawyers do
not bully witness on the stand is be-
cause "a Texas witness had IA soon begin
shooting from witness box rs any
where else.
"Woman is delusion,n said crlsty
West Baton Rouge bachelor the ether
day. Old man Snodgrcss rctorted:
"Wcll, man is always hngging some de-
fusion or other"
An exchange says women never think.
Perhaps the man who pcnncd that state
mcnt thinks these spring hats and be-
witching spring suits plan themselves,
but we don't believe it.
The drouth in some parts of Texas is
simply terrible. The farmers have made
neither corn nor cotton, and the pnstur-
age has been burned up. II is feared
that there will be great suffering among
the poor.
Two printers working in the Phiadcl-
phia Record respectively named Thorn
as +. Lambert and James f. Gather,
won half Of the capital prize of 100000
in tho last drawing of the Louisiana
State Lottery.
A talking machine, capable of turning
ont $50 words per minute, was put on
trial in New Orleans last week. A young
woman of twenty-five sweet summers
silcnccd it in just two minutes and
thrce-quarlcrs
A Shreveport woman fell out of q
fourth story window the other day, and
the first thing she did after being res
torcd to consciousness was to wish she
had on her new silk hose instead of those
old cotton stockings.
People often complain Of hard times
from mere natural tendency to growl,
but . Georgia darkcy the othorda said
"Ncbbcr seed SIGH times since | been
born. Work all day, steal all night, and
blessed if can hardly make u livin'.'
A rustic bridegroom was compliment
ed by one of his acquaintance ON the
charming appearance of his bride, "Sho
has the most lovely color | have ever
seem eyes, it ought to be good; she
paid dollar for little bit on u saucer
jealous skunk said he "ought to
stay at home and attend to his own
business no matter if he was Mayor
and member of the Democratic Eyecu-
tive Committee. Now, whose business
was skunk attending tot is the question
prevailing in these parts.
GLOW had you the audacity, john"
asked q Scottish lord Of u servant, "to
go and tell some people that | was
mean fellow and no gentleman" "Na,
no, sir" was the candid answer, "you'll
no catch me at the like o that. l aye
keep my thoughts to myself
Tho New York Times predicts that
five hundred thousand English working
men will emgrate from England to this
country in the next five years. Wages
of all kinds are from 50 to 100 per cent
better here than in the mother country,
while food is % per cent cheaper.
A Kansas farmer purchased revolver
for his wife, and insisted on target prac-
ticc, so that she could defend herself in
case of his absence. After the bullet had
been dug out of his leg and the COW
hauled off to the bone-yard, he said he
guessed she had better shoot with an TX.
A lady tainted recently at temper
ancc meeting in Dcs Moincs. Two hun
dred hands involuntarily thrust them
selves into the left breast pockets of two
hundred coats, then the owners hap
pened to think, and the lady was carried
to neighboring drug store in order to
he restored to consciousness.
A whoop-bang sort of Il boy, with feet
as broad and Hat as a pie-tin, trotted
through the Central market till he reach
ed stall kept by single woman about