The weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1878-1881, 1879-07-15

AA0D9U6 1011S8 ~
Iass Mlnnss - TseAt ~ G1sl-
san Yranelscoo New Letter
~ have ben & subscriber Of tie Nesse
Letter for the last ten Yeas /" satdA .brc-
ken-upr looking young man coming into
this Office yesterday and sitting down il front
Of the managing editor, land I call upon It
for aid and assistance"
The editor looked rather pointedly at the
clock, and asked what he could do for the
visitor.
.Why, I want you to hold up to public
scorn and Devastation a fellow called Mooney
and q mean, red-headed girl named Nor
rissy."
aScandal case, Ell"
ga heap sight worse. You see, I was en-
gagged to be married to that giIl-her names
Maria-and Dr.. Stone was to hitch us up the
first Of the month, SO I asked this mean cuss,
Mooney, to be one Of the groomsmen."
He consented, of course"
aYou bet he did. You see, Mooney has .
big black mustache and-and all that-and
he's a good deal Of a masher, as it were. He
said he'd try and make it lively and pleasant
for the bridesmaids"
"And did he ?"
"Whv, he actually made love to all four.
Got the other groomsmen furious by flirting
with the whole lot. Told 'em it was the cor
rect thing for the groomsmen to kiss the
bridesmaids all round before and after the
ceremony, and that they ought to meet ard
practice to get the thing in good running or
der"
snid they practice Pr said the editor laying
down his pen.
"Did they? Why, it was just disgusting,
the way they went on every evening. To see
that villain Mooney pretend to steer down the
aisle and back up against the chancel-rail,
and then, when the mock service was over,
kiss and paw round the girls, would have
made your hair raise a foot. Why, he &C
tually began flirting with my Maria Il mean
that Morrissy girl"
" Made love to the bride, oh ?"
"Exactiy and she a-letting him do it
mind you. Well, yesterday they said they
said they were going to have a final rehearsal
that night, and to make the thing more per-
feet the intended to get Bings, the young di-
vinity student, to read the service. And as |
was going over to Oakland with a load of
furniture for our new house, Mooney said he
would ~oficiate in my place."
"That was kind OF him." ID
"But wait a minute. When | got back
and called at Maria's house, about II p. M, 1
found all the party sitting round the psrlor
looking very serious, except the bride, who
seemed kinder frightened. whats the
trouble ? said I whats happened? p"
"Weii, the fact is," says that cheeky
Mooney, +" there's been the most singular &C
cident, the queerest mistake you ever Heard
of in your life. You see, we were rehearsing
the service as usual, and l was a holding Ma
ria's hand just like this, when young Bings
got sorter absent minded, so to speak, and
the first thing we knew he pronounced us
man and wife in the regular form, and he
now says we are married in real earnest.
Too bad, isn't it,"
singular mistake, y said the editor. ..
Shut the worst of il was the way that
false-hearted hussey took it. She said it vas
pretty hard, but what couldn't be cured must
be injured, and that she supposed they
couldn't get a divorce under a year, anyhow,
and a lot of stuff like that" FIJI
"'Peared resigned to her fate, as it were."
EXACTLY; and then Mooney Clipped in
with a lot Of stuff about not crying over split
milk, and said he'd take the furniture of my
hands, and pay for the ring. Said he'd give
his note for 'em. Cheek? Why, that mar
has more gall than a pawnbroker's clerk, and
I van You, Mr.. Editer, TO show him and his
red-headed, big-footed wife up the very worst
way. Accident, indeedl Why, it's the
plainest put-up job 1 ever saw in the whole
course of my lite. Just let 'em have it in
ivai,Ssss, e YOU please, and I'll take 500 extra
copies!" -
The editor said he'd attend to it, and has
since written to Mr.. Mooney to say that a
position as reporter was always open to him
OH this go-ahead journal.