Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1879-07-03
small order. He now finds 100

ID is $780, 0l Jesse Weed, o scien-
ific farmer who takes first premi-
Inns for most everything, made a
,ox for Mr.. Graft to keep bis scions
md grating wax 10. 1t was worth
$500 and $1,000. and he
agreed to take his pay in grafis. He
low fluids, however that his bill is
s96 90. Pat Honeywell Mr. Graft
vas not religious when he met with
Pat Roney. They enjoyed the social
glass together. We do not know
what amount of gratis Mr. Rooney
for bns his bill now is
$3.50. 00l 1t will DO some time be-.
fore he will realize that sum from
his grated apples. This is all the
victims We can enumerate at pres
ent. To them and their follow suf-
ferers we dedicate the ballad above
referred to:
THE LIGHTNING-RoD DISPENSER
Ifthe weary world is willing, Pyea little word to say
0f lightning rod dispenser that dropped down
me one day,
With poem in his motions. with sermon in his
mien,
with hands as white as lilies. and a face uncommon
clean,
No wrinkle had his vestments, and his linen glis-
tened white,
And his new-constructed necktc was an interesting
sight;
Which almost wish his razor had made red that
whiteskinned throat,
And the new constructed necktie had com posed a
hangman's knot,
Ere he brought his sleek~trimmed carcass for my
women felix's to see,
And his rip saw tongues buzzin' for to gouge
cash in me.
But couldn't help but like him-as always think
/ must.
The gold of my own doctrines in follow heap of
dust;
When fired my own opinions at this person. round
by round,
They drew an answering volley, on very similar
sound;
touched hum on religion. and his hopes my heart
had known;
He said he'd had experiences quite similar of his
own.
I told him of the doubtin's that made dark my
He had laid awake till morning with the same old
breed Of fears.
l told him OF the rough path hoped to heaven to
He was on that very ladder. only just round be-
told him of my visions of the sinfulness of gain;
He had seen the et-same picters though not quite
SO clear and plain.
Our politics different and first he CALLED and
WINGED
But arg'ed him SO able, he was very soon con-
WINGED.
And twas getting toward the middle ofa hungry
Summer day;
There was dinner on the table, and asked him
would he stay
And he sat down among us, everlasting trim and
neat,
And asked short, crisp blessing, almost good
Then he fred up the mercles of our Great Eternal
Friend,
And gave the Lord Aimghtya good. frst~class rec,
ommend;
And for fun an hour listened to the sugar coated
scamp,
Talking like blessed angel-eating like a-blasted
tramp.
My wife, she liked the stranger, smiling him warm
and sweet,
Ut always Hatters women, when their guests are on
And he limited that some ladies never lose their
early charms,
And kissed her latest baby, and received it in his
My and daughters liked him. for he had pre-
gressive views,
And chewed the quid of fancy. and gave down the
latest news;
And couldn't help but like him, as fear always
must,
The geld of my own doctrines, in fellow.heap OF
dust.
He spreading desolation through piece ofap-
ple-pie,
When he paused, and looked upon us with a tear
in his off.eye,
And said, "0h. happy family Your blessings make
me sad;
You call s,s t. mind the dear ones that in happier days
4 wife as sweet as this one babe as bright and
fair
little girl with ringets. like that one over there
Iworshiped them too blindly my eyes with love
were DIM
God took then, to his own heart, and now worship
Him.
But had not neglected the means within my way,
Then they might still be living, and loving me to
day.
" One night there came tempest, the Handicapped
The clouds that tramped above us were shooting
bolts Of fire.
In my own house. I. lying, was thinking, to my
blame,
How little had guarded against those shafts Of
flame,
when crash - through roof and ceiling the deadly
lightning cleft.
And killed my wife and children aud only left
" Since that dread time I've wandered, and naught
Save to save others loved ores whose lives have
yet been spared
Since then, it il my mission, where'er by sorrow
tossed.
To sell to virtuons people good lightning rods--at
cost.
With sure and strong protection III clcthe your
Twill cost you fifty dollars (perhaps trfe more),
What little else it 80 at lowest price I'll put;
{you signing this agreement to pay SO much per
1 signed il, while my family all approving stood
about;
And dropped tear upon it--(but it didn't blot II
outD
That very day with wagons came some men, both
They cImed upon my buildings just if they owned
em all
They hacked 'em, and they hewed en-, much against
They trimmed 'sm up with gewgaws. and they bound
'em down with wires
They trimmed 'em and they wired 'em, and they
trimmed an wired 'em STILL
And every precious minute kept a-running up the
bill.
My soft spoke guest a-soeking, did rave and rush
He was supping with neighbor just three mile
further
" Do you Think fercely shouted. that 1 want a
To save each separat hay cock ont O. heavens
SUNNI fret
Do you think to keep my buildin's safe from some
I'm goin' to deed you over all the balance of my
farmi'
He looked up quite astonisAcd with face devoid of
guile,
And he pointed to the contract with reassuring
smile
1t the first occasion that he disagreed with me,
But he held me to that paper with firmness sad to
And for that thunder ero the rascal finally
went,
l. az,
And If any lightnin r9dder wants dinner dialogue
With the restaurant department of an enterprising
dog,
Let him set his mill a runnin' just inside my out
And I'll bet two hundred dollars that he won't ha We
long to wait.
-Ghicago Farmers Revre1,
By reference to an article on the
first page of this paper it will be seer
that the courts Of Iowa give these
swindlers poor encouragement. Wis
consin must follow her example. We
are just enough communist to urge
farmers and all others to band to
gether and resist to the last the pay
ment of any such fraudulent claims.
Do it in law If you can; do it some
other way if you can't 1t can be
done in law. Many man has killed
another and went unhung by plead
ing insanity. We don't mean to tell
farmers to plead insanity when they
signed those contracts, but the insan-
Ity dodge shows that there are lodges