The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-06-06
Items.

Birds are not noted for courage, but
many die game.
Eight thousand and sixty four lauguag-
es are spoken in the world.
"A man calls his wife Sulphur because sho
is always a match for him.
A good deal ofauentiou is now given in
Florida to the cultivation of rice.
The coachmau of the period is bland
ly requested to do little less hitching up.
"A man who dies before he is dead, is
what Robert Collyer calls a misanthrope.'
Silver combs are in high favor. They
are worn high in order TO demonstrate the
fact.
-Talmage hopes to meet his enemies in
Heaven, but not for the first two or three
days
1t is lucker to pick up horseshoe than
to be picked up by one--attached to
mules leg.
"A fashionable mania among London
ladies at present is the collection of old
watch ceases.
A boy with his elbows out was asked
the cause, and replied, 4 laughed in my
sleeves till burst them
A husband in this town calls his wife
Discipline Queer enough, too, as he Is
unable TO maintain her.
The members of the Chinese legation in
Washington are strictly temperate, none of
them using ardent spirits.
A mosquito bar affords good protec-
ton from mosquitoes, but crowbar doesn't
protect a corn-ield worth cent.
"A cotemporary says, Inc old men OF
tI-iay are not What they used to De, VI
course not, Ihey used 10 he poys'
Have YOU a molher-in-law askeda a
man oi adlscansoIale-iooking person. NO!
De rePIleu' 'out We la'ner Ill JAM
Noah was a practical temperance man
who lived on rainw " ter for forty days,
Vhoush lam Snou'u nave n'a"e n'ni 'niis'y'
1t is q cd,ilu, TACT, if true that only
Twelve members pl Congress have commit
ted suicide since the organization otthe gov
erhmeht'
Why is IL that the strawberry crop is
never ruined? Is the agricultural enterprise
of the country all monupoiized by the peach
growers?
i speech is silver then the floors of the
Senate and House uur hit to be llnee-deep in
trade dollars, halves, quarters, dimes, and
haH'dimes'
The Philadelphia Times thinks there is
one financial scheme on which all parties
can unite, namely, the abolition of twenty
cent pieces
The Cincinnati Commercial does not be-
lieve that an apple caused the fall of Adam;
but thinks it might have been an orange or
banana peel
There's no place like home just at this
time of the year The woman folks are
making it livelier than the most moral cir
Gus on earln'
| A young ladv being asked if there were
many beautiful women in Washington, in
nocently replied, 20, no, there are only six
of us at present.
Two small but benevolent infants in the
| park 90, dear, my beetles only dot five
| legs Break anozzer of, Johnny, so he
won't be lame, ,'-Puck.
re.ho r;o,, ,,oo,,,o 1.,o,, ,,ho+ ross;,s
need work-people have of their money, they
would never send them away and tell them
to come another day.
.S,bso,;,or, oo,,in, IN o+ ,ho rota of
fhv dav ) SoiJ ON aditor and tba r;rol
paper explained that they were coming in
10 order their paper stopped.
| A VOuup man in \ ebraSka sent an o.
fer of marriage to a girl in Iowa whom he
f,ncjed. and in reply received this telegram:
Come on with your minister.
The man who asserts that the Chinese
are unciyilizod. probably tried to get his
shirts from Johns laundry on tick The
Chinese do cashee business.
-Onium smokers find little federation in
Japan. A man was recently sentenced to
ten wears hard labor in Yokohama for yio
lation of the law against the practice.
,,,. A., o,,. IL
charge of a BROOKLYN church, has this fnan-
cial creed Trust in God. Never spend a
dollar until it is in your pocket, Do YOUR
utmost 10 help yourself.
The bov that walks lame around tho
streets now, and looks pale and detected, is
the same gay and blithsome child of JOY
who but yesterday got caught slipping un-
der the canvas at the circus.
? -SpRtNa WoRK-Of all things do NOT
cet behiad i, tbe sorl !, the snr1 Nv IUs
: the work. and DO not let the work drive
? you' II pau beginning Is made, there
, VIII probably be bad ending.
, Hon Jobn u Van Rprar of AIborv
has if is said an umbrella thar has bes,
in lis family fnr one bundred vears w
=, can't believe it, unless the family entered
into contract never to lend it.
: Won cor ILL ,ryo or N rao MAJ, i, Tovoa
e and notbing thongbt Off. Int if Won suaa
in m The rressnce of a lady ibev viii fre ".~ wn,
> fortv dnllars Tbey ore detorm;nad ~ a.
Il courage impiety. Baltimore Necs.
:, He had inst arrived at the Astor House
, fresh from Skowkegan wben be baarS
J, |
II 'Dern nv nicter 9soiJ be ,ef thot ,oo,
:. amt cot "a fur's MOO York k,Np,rI w
-
u A tiny spider dropped from the ceilinI
h into sleeping church members mouth, re
+ Gently. 1t went down into the mammotl
, coyern and nplled its ,yeb !, ofter II An
other warning against sIeening in cbnrch