Bismarck tribune., 1879-12-12
:.TOO NEAR THE STOVE"
A Story of Tom Placide, the Actor.

A story OF TOm Placlde, the ActOf.
A popular comedian, whom we shall
beg leave to introduce as Tom Placide,
in the course of starring tour through
the States was descending the Mississippi,
in fine spirits, plenty Of money. and
sporting coat There were divers queer
characters on board the steamer with,
whom Tom who, dearly loved fun, even
while amusing himself with their various
peculiarities, was, nevertheless a great
favorite. None Of them, however, wooed
his good opinion more sedulously and
kindly than any elderly backwoodsman
from the innermost depths of Indiana,
now bent upon visit to New Orleans
for the first time in his life. This russell
looking antique, whether it was from the
comedians sporting buttons, or the never
ending l1ghtness and gayety Of his talk,
had fully made up his mind. that Tom
was a gentleman sportsman, and when
ever he saw small game going on, he
was careful in noticing the skill and
quality of the players, the stake to be
lost or gained, &C., and bringing Tom
all the various particulars. -
The gentleman sportsman: was very
much obliged, Of course, for all this un-
looked for information, though he didn't
exactly know at the time what the deuce
to make of it; when, one day, the conf
Dental backwoodsman took him aside
and told him there was a 'thundeling
smart chance for pile' on one of the
tables and if he had no objections he
would "go in with him snacks" Tom,
though highly amused at the offer, un-
fortunately for his knowing friend, de-
tested gambling in every shape; he, there
fore, at once told his proposing partner
that he was mistaken, and, in short, that
his fancy coat covered not a sportsman,
but q player. ~ q &l.- st.s. .>:.-
"Good graciousp exclaimed the aston
ished backwoodsman, zone of them fel-
lers as tumbles! I've seen 'em, once,
moren half naked, cuttin' up down to
Madison!" E ig
Instead of troubling himself much in
explaining to his new friend the differ
ence between theatrical shoD and q CIR
Gus .shoao, Tom, highly delighted. retail
ed the story of the cards to various of his
fellow passengers in such a ,ludicrous
manner as instantly to render the old fel-
low quite an object of interest. Next to
the card playing was another object that
had completely aroused the backwoods-
mans curiosity; and this was a very large
and singularly- shaped pine box, which
'ay in the Social Hall, or general saloon
of the steamer containing nothing| more
nor less than a huge bass fiddle, the prop
crty of a very reserved and gloomy-look-
ing German, on. his way South; profess
slonly. .1 5a #2 f#.as
''Placy," whispered the backwoodsman
to Tom, one day-for he had got very
familiar after learning that he belonged
to show-t'what on earth hev they got
in that box, think ye2 It's the onhuman
ist shape ever seed in all creation"
~ s'Hush!' replied Tom, mysteriously.
.sDont you know?''
ssNot l. I'm Mighty dead guessin'."
I. 55ssThen it's bodles!" echoed the startled
woodsman. You dom mean ra'al hu-
! man bodies2"
3 #5:assBodies!' still repeated Tom, at the
same time. applying his handkerchief to
his nose. Taking them. down for dissec-
ton. Belong to doctor on board.'' 4
The woodsman turned Immediately
away, his eyes wild with horror, holding
his nose. AT length, togratify his insat-
liable curiosity, he ventured to inquire if
they were s'niggers.' n
Z g White woman and her. two babes,"
was Toms cool reply. "One on each
side Of her accounts for the shape of
the box" s..ssss s4I js.l5 -,.s..,,.,
At this moment the pale, moody, un-
shaven violinist approached them, anG
Toms y Q. thoroughly deceived victim made