Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1879-01-02

q
"1he Beautiful Snow has come," he SAID.
"And Staying will soon be here"
"L1rE is is reel" to the spinner.
A NOISY fellow annoys a fel!ow.-N-
y. Commercial.
PR1zE-F1eRrERs show each other
marked attention.
WHEN Ham was sick was he cured by
smoking.-N. Y. Mail.
WE shall soon see the boy mounte-
bank with his sled.-N. Y. MaI.
I DEARLY love my sweet art, said the
enthusiastic OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES Iyar.-
script.
TIE sleighing is excellent-the elay-
ing of livery horses on credit.-lhicago
Times.
"a GROWING nuisance 1.-THE New
foundland pup next door.-Nm1istown
Herald.
ANYBODY can catch a cold now. The
trouble t. to let 60 again, like the man
who caught the bear.
A YOUNG man with bis first goatee
may be said to have tuft time Of it.
Giasgo,c (Ky.) Times.
BROOKLYN has converted banjo
ist," and New York is clamoriDg foE q
converted piano FOUNDER.
He that hath no music in his sole Is
tit for usher, undertaken, Underwater OK
some such thing.-Rome Sentinel.
IT cannot be that AL flesh is grass
Grass gets its dew-about the only thing
that does in this world.-Harijond Jour-
MRS. PARTISGToS declares that che
does not wish to vote, as she fears she
could not stand the electrical franchise.
! AN Irishman tells Of fight in which
there was only one whole nose left in the
whole crowd, and that belonged to the
1ea-kettle."
i In the bright lexicon Of the modern
! farmer there is no such word as fail.
All the threshing is done by machinery.
-L>are!' Courier.
Two hundred and nine lawyers in
congress? Good gracious? Is It any
wonder they talk Of a brief session -
Ne'o York Express.
ARCTIC explorers, instead Of blubber-
ing over the unctious viands peculiar to
the Polar regions. are rather disposed to
make light of them.
;: A PAIR of No. 13 boots was recently
voted to the handsomest colored man in
Lexington, Mo-, and, further, they were
just his ft.
"Don't you feel nice when, after hav-
ing lost your collar button, and bought
new one, 20 find the old one in your
: boot? "-Lynn Reporter.
= A SOUTH NoRwALK halter has chewed
. tobacco great number of years without
any injury to himself, having begged
e: the tobacco.-Connsctic,t Paper.
e. 4 FRIEND Of ours says she enjoyed
= her trip to Europe immensely. The
e sunsets were so stylish-such Fashionable
e colors.-B inghamton Republican.
!: In Paris when any one in the theatre
K laughs heartily the rest OF the audience
put on great dignity and cry out: NO
joke: No joke: He laughs for pay!''
A DOLL that swims has come out
n Exchange. 1t was about time it did
It "come out. The weather has become
j. too cold for such diversions.
st Herald.
o AN obvious improvement on Shake
p speare: "Cry havoc, and let loose the
is cats Of war;" They will be much more
'e likely to come up to the scratch thar
% dogs will.
E. In the land Of the Ka1frs eight Cows
u will purchase a man wife; and what
re is still better in some instances, she may
1t be disposed of at the same price.-Bv
a ta1o Express.
" COUNTERFEIT pennies have appeared
= in Detroit. This is diabolical scheme
"a to defraud the printers-and compel 'en
h h to 90 to church to get rid of the bogu
- stuff oristown Herald.
A PIECE of court plaster or 4 pr5tt,
girls cheek is very much out of place
Re but it don't improve matters any whel
N her young man goes home at II o'clocl
with it on the end of his nose.
le "TALK about Vanderbilt's four track
u from Albany to Buffalo, said a newl,
III arrived tramp this morning, "why, Nv
a got as many as sixteen thousand between
IL: H. Syracuse and Utica."- Utica Observer.
,oj THERE is nothing which fills the sou
,e of young man with CONSERVATION s
t much as to take his best girl to prayer
,e meeting and have the pastor call upo,
of "our stranger friend for few remark
of and a prayer"
he IT would be better not to interior
lis with the late Robert Whittaker's will:
Dy There are too many to break. He wa
So a Philadelphia millionaire. Three hav
as already been discovered and more cour
al ties are to be heard from.-Ne,o Ior
er Telegraph.
WHEN man dies suddenly, withou
the aid OF the physician" the corone
y. must be called in. If man dies regu
st larly, after being treated by doctor
n everybody knows why he died and til
be coroner's inquest is not necessary.-Ne
Ill Orleans Picoyune.
. HEARTLEss scientist-"Miss Adelin:
X, permit me to ask your acceptance of m
~ hand" Gushing maiden 80; Profe.
ms sor-so sudden" Heartless scienti:
rs, (proceeding) -" My-er-handbook c
Vi of the Hindoos." Collapse of G. N. J
,, Puck.
,:ss SINCE the death of Bryant. the Ne,
~ York Post has assumed higher an
~ broader tone. 1t now makes jokes O
10 DR.. Mary Walkers trowsers. No wor
no der Mr.. Croly, late of the Graphic, say
he the tone of New York journalism is to
nd high for the readers in that city.-No
of uich Herald.
he THE papers tell the mournful story c
a a Nova Scotian who was recently scalpe
to and rendered entirely bald by load {
or bricks dropped from ladder. The car
to less hod:carrier will probably be sue
ne for damages by the hairless cod-harrie
ch -Ne,o York Graphic.
g, IT is always we'll to take cheerful
." - view of things. A dozen years sgo
10 friend of Causeur's went to New 1or
~ and remained week. On his return b
- announced to his friends that he ha
'!e made eight hundred dollars during h!
lis absence. CHOW did you do it," aske
ay one of the group. easy enough; an,
ad body can do it. I only spent two hui