West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1879-05-24
Judge Began.

When Judge Began was a prac,icing
lawyer I'm Georgia hc weighed about 500
pounds. lie was short man. and had NO
coupling pole betwiNt his head and Shuul-
erS. His back was rs broad as a cellar door.
OF COURSE ne Was a good-naturcd man. hut
sometimes was very sarcastic in the use of
language before "a jury. One day he had
case In justice court. i'm one of the upper
counties of Georgia, and there was little
lawyer ON the other side named Virgins
Virgins weighed about ninety pOut ds and
was game and SISSY, like most all little men,
and had voice as fine as the + strisg ON
fiddle
Well, the Judge was rollicking along i'm a
good naturcd way to the jury, and made some
illusions that nsultcd Virgins dignity
Nhcrcupon Niggins hoppcd up like a kill
dee and Init the judge a whaCk ON the back
The Judge looked round little and
says he, "Nhat YOU bout, Virgins what
YOU bout
''l'm ftin +" SAYS Virgins.
''Sei down and behave YOURSELF said
the Judge, and his ewes twinklcd merrih as
hc continued his rhapsody of random re
marks. Pretty soon he offended Virgins
again, who, rising forward, tmnultuouSlv
popped him three or four times more, max
ing as much impression as If he had hit the
side of house
"What YOU bout, Wigsinsl What Won
tYin 10 dor said the Judge rs he winked
at the jury
II tell you sir, I'm iitu', screamed
Virgins, and he popped him again
The Judge reached his arm back and
gently "squashcd' Virgins down in his
chair, saying ''set down, Virgins. and be
quiet, or I'M take YOU 10y the napc of the
neck and seat Of the brceChcs and throw
Nou mp so high that the blue birds will build
IN your jacket pocket before YOU come
down. BE still, | say
Virgins "hccd still, but he studied the
code of honor for few days and then went
back to his tailors trade
When the Judge was elevated to the
bench he didn't give the jurors much lati
tude in making up a verdict. If the YER
diets didn't suit him he charged 'cm over
again and sent 'em back one dav Colonel
Foster was defending fellow who was
sued ON promissory note and wound up an
eloquent speech with 'thcsc are grand prin-
ciplcs OF the law, gentlemen, which control
this case They are as old as England. as
solid ns the blue Ridge and have come down
10 us untarnishcd by the tide of time or the
'''''N w ''''i''' iIill'Ns hlNl ~ VIII lllN
Honor charge You.
The Judge was leaning forward, his eyes
sparkling and his mouth twitching at the
corners. Hardly waiting for the Colonel
10 sit down he said ellis Honor won't
charge You amy such thing, gentlemen; for
thos" eternal principles my Brother Foster
has clucidntcd have no more 10 do with the
case than the Koran of Mohomet. This
defendant admits that he signed this note,
and if you believe him, then all these dila-
tory, nugatory, purgatory pleas that hc has
ripped up, tripped up dug mp, stumpcd up
and trumpcd mp, won't avail him. What
do YOU say to that, Brother Foster, ch %
Nothing, sir; only that am Obliged to
differ with the Court, said the Colonel.
eyes, sir, you can differ; you have the
right To differ hut where the Court and the
council differ, the Court prevails, and that 's
the law of This case, gentlemen. Retire
and make up your verdict.