The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1879-01-31
FIRST LESSON IN LOVE AND IN
TEMPERANCE.
BY oNE or OUR BOYS.

all railway accidents, steamboat explos
ions, wars, famines and poverty of every
grade were directly or Indirectly caused
by intemperance Our early impression
was that if Beelzebub would not NEEDLE
with cider no chemical change could
ever cause it to become hard. In those
days we regarded the possession ola "pint
bottle" equal to thousand mile ticket
on the road to perdition. We considered
a tobacco leaf merely as a circular issued
by his satanic majesty, and thrown in
the way of innocent youth.
AS our ideas began to spread out and
we become more hardened we wondered
how it was that our reverend uncle did
not cherish and protect instead of paying
ms fifteen cents per day to slaughter to-
bacco worms. We pondered on the fact
that our pious relative sold several wag-
on loads of peaches every 'peach year."
and the man who bought them would,
several months after the purchase, bring
our uncle's pay home in a keg. OfcOurse
it was none of our business and it was
very wrong for us to NEEDLE with min
ister's affairs. But had not the mother of
the second man been of an lnquiring
turn of mind all things would have been
different
Our first real experience in lntemper-
ance was of rather remarkable charac-
ter, and ought to have done us more good
than it did. The reader will please excuse
us for mixing up two subjects so unlike
ly to be appreciated by the same person
az ''love and intemperance" Had we
headed this article "Intemperance," the
young ladies would have given it to their
brothers TO read and the brothers would
not have had time, and somebody would
have felt Sighted. Had we made il read
all Love" there might have been fam
lily quarrel on account of each member
wanting to read it first.
Attic tender age of fifteen we fell very
suddenly in love. We might fill a page
or two in the vain endeavor to prove to the
reader that our ideal was not like any,
thing else on this earth, but was an an
gel. But we think young Americans can
better understand our condition when we
simply say we were completely and thor
oughly Struck" We did not have nerve
enough to go boldly to Deacon Browns
house to visit the object of our admira-
ton, but we built up our reputation won
derfully for being regular at church.
When Miss Brown was there the sermon
was a blank, and when she was not it
was bore. Of week days, when our
love boiled over to such an extent we
could no longer live and endure, we
used to hide some article on the farm in
order to furnish a reasonable excuse to
go over and borrow of the Brown family.
we were rewarded by mere
sight of our angel, and sometimes we
were not.
We learned that there was to be an APP
pie cutting at brother Cray's and we
thought our time was coming to make a
bold strike. The eventful night arrived,
and we were on hands with determine
ton to take Miss Brown home or COM
nit suicide. Our beloved occupied a
seat between two old ladies and we could
not contrive any way to get nearer to her
than across the room. Bro. Cray had
provided apples enough to keep every
lady al work allnight or as much longer
as the company would stay, so the en-
promised to be success at
least for Bro. Cray. But to us the whole
thing was proving failure, as our part
ner was an old maid and she gave us a
great deal of information regarding the
different varieties of apples we were
Once during the evening we heard our
loved one wonder whether there was any
water in and we thought of rushing off
after some for her but we were afraid
some one might look at us so we sat
STILL
AT last a friend of ours asked us to 90
out and look at his new saddle, and
Mhen we got to the yard gate he drew a
bottle on us and Of course we refused,
but on learning that it would "brace us
h.
Our friend knew our secret. We had
found that we must confide in some one
or blow up, and had made confidant
of him. He told us if we would take
another drink we would be in a good
shape to take Miss Brown home, as we
could talk blue streak We took his
advice and then returned to the house
A change had been made and our dar-
ling occupied seat On the end of a
bench: There was vacant seat at her
side. We took our old position and
tried for some time to work Ourself I'D
to pitch high enough to cross over
and take the vacant place. Our partner
began to find fault with our work and
Our ideas began to get a little mixed.
The uncertain light of a talIow candle
seemed to be growing dim in the neigh
borhOOd of seat we so much desired
We thought several times we would
make break, but every time we got up
we wilted and sat down again We were
IN anything but an easy state. of mind
and we were suddenly thrown into a
much worse state by seeing an impertin-
ent chap get up and start toward the va
cant throne. Our last hope in life seemed
to be going up, and we did not feel like
letting it go without an effort. We mus
tered all our courage and started, and
although we took a circuitOus route we
beat our rival. Mrs. Cray saw our move
and tried to stop us, but partly on &C
count Of loosing our balance and partly
because we We're desperate, we sat
down-down-down
We were deafened by shout of laugh
ter from the company, and storm of
words from Mrs Cray. We rolled over
on the floor and then scrambled to our
feet Muddled as our mind was, there
are no words in any language or dialect
fit TO describe our feelings as we realized
that table-cloth spread over kettle of
apple butter was not fit thing to sit
down on beside an angel. The contents
of the kettle were little above the tenn
perature of our love, and we bolted for
home * 49, $50
We had vague idea of renewing our
attentions sometime, but the next Valen-
tines day brought us a neat little pack
aoa from Miss RrOy~D x,b;oI, - 4.