Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1879-06-28
A FAMILY JAR.

Philemon Hayes and Fanny kay had oeen
ins, three weeks married.
They sat AZ break fast in their cozy dining
room one fine morning in summer, totally
Infatuated with each other Never such hap
pipcss as theirs before. The felicity Of Adam
and MS LAZY before they made the acquaintance
4 fto serpenf. was not 10 be mentioDet! 10 the
sume breath.
TDcv kissed each other betweea every cup
n c,nie and embraced ut least twlce-some-
times thrice during every meal. just now
they were speaking Of disagrecments. Some
fiepls OF tLei.s had fallen on: and refused TO
fail in again.
..W Ne never will disagree, will we, Phil,
dcir?" Asked Mrs Fanny.
Disagreed will tie heavens fall ?" returned
Phil
Il sincerely h, pc not. 1t would be decided
lv di.arrceable." nuehed Fanny; but il |
tlonoLt VIC would qunrrel and have rash
thoughts toward each other, should lie tempt
ca 10 terminate my existence.
Mg precious Fanny r. cried Phil spring
ing up ard upse,tiug the tcast plate ON the
Garnet. of which he WAS perfectly obivicus in
his eagerness TO get tis arms around Fanny
"Nly foolish little darling as il We should
ever be 50 absurd IA kissl May be drawn
aud quarlered l,nother kissl il ever speak
one word that shall cause tear TO hll The di-
vine eyes of my dearest lthird explosiopl
Fanny!
"Oh, how happy you make me, Phil. !
shall try so hard 10 be just the faithful. loving
wife vou deserve. Now finish your breakfast,
dear. The toast will be growing cold. And
no Phil did you notice Mrs. Smiths borrid
bonnet last night? declare it destroyed oil
my Measure in the n.usic. ! do wish people
who will wear such untastelul bonrets would
stay at home from these delightful concerts
so do |, Fanny noticed the ugly thing
the moment we entered :hc ball. Blue How
crs aud pink ribbons, and she dark as Gre
ole"
No. ny love; the flowers were green
Green aud blue lOuk so much alike by Gas
light"
Il know they do, but noticed !, so parlic-
ularly that could not be deceived. Blue
espcciaily light bue-lcoks iearfully on
ark complexi ned woman"
50 il doe. Phil quite agree with you.
dear. But the flowers were not blue, they
we're srreu saw them at Mrs. Gray's shop
beiore they were purchased.
.Nly dearest-Fanny, Of course you think
you are right, my love, but ! have good eye
FIR c. =. and noticed these flowers with great
attention. Blue aucmones with yellow CEN
tres"
Green hihuscns with white centres. my
dear Phil Very pretty for a light-skinned
woman. bui horrid for brunette"
"Why. Fanny. how absurd As II could
not determine color when | studied 1t bali
rhe evening
But it was By ess-light, my love. IL
would look altogether different by daylight.
Il war such a pale green.
"lt wa such pale blue. I remember,
tllonsht If the sky before storm"
And thought Of tue sea. II was nearly
sea-grceu."
"Why. Fanny. rilculous II was sky-blue. "
How you do contralic, me. my Philemon.
It was very light green"
Aud insist Il was blue"
Do you mean 10 tell me le?'
Il mean 10 tell you you are mistaken"
Which amounts to the same thing"
Yuu make the application, Mrs. Fanny
Hayes"
Mr. Philemon Hayes.
Fanny"
" say il was green, sir
q say il was blue, 81 there ~
You are wretch. Phil, a real mean heart
les. wretch !" and Fanny pushed back her
plate angrly.
And you are an opinionaied, self-wi!led
woman (" and Phi in bis agitation, upset the
coffee. scalding the cats back and himself at
the same time.
Tie deuce 70 he cried, rubbing bis rel
fncers with bis handkerchief. Il wish had
never seen a woman.
What's that, sir p
.'Confound the women They're a curse to
tie world"
"You brute" cricd Mrs Hayes, now
thoroughly incensed-"take that. and seizing
a plate Of mullins she took aim at PhiFs head,
bot. being = woman, her aim vas not so accu-
rate as it might have been. aud the plate went
through the window. smashing in the tile Of
Fiiz Joner, who was passing, and the mullins
were scattered 10 wild confusion about the
room.
Phil was indignant. lie laid bis hand 90
the poker.
iii did not scorn to strike woman." be
began.
"Oh strike" exclaimed Fanny. g 1t will
only be iu keeping with your other conduct
Don't let any notions Of honor restrain you
because YOU never had any"