The daily Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1878-1???, 1879-12-09
SEVERAL BRICKS.

ny WHICH spoon WEI HAVE BEEN WOUNDED
DURING MR. NJ. II. HARRELL's ILLNESS.
In our younger days, we were like Caesar
ambitious; and the heighth Of our am
bition was to be local editer of The Bull
LErIN. Nothing could be more pleasant
than to stroll about town, thought We, have
good time, write few items and be done
with our days work But our shoit career
as local scribe has changed our mind about
the matter. When only few weeks ago,
we commenced doing the local work on this
paper, our hopes ran high and we were
happy But people soon commenced shak-
ING their fingers and fists in our face and
some of our vitality was scarced out Of us,
and we became thoughtful. About this
time unfortunately for us shooting
scrape occurred down town, and we wrote a
"bad" head to an account of ii for which
We were told We ought to have our CD
id head knocked off 4" We had
already become thoughtful, but this made
Us "thcughtfuller.' We resolved after
this to say only that which was compliment
airy, and acting upon this resolution, said
that one ofour young ladies who had taken
very active part in making one of our pub
lie gatherings success, had "shone like a
bright particular star" Would YOU believe
il. dear reader, We had our foot in it again
We knew that she didn't shine like par
licular star" all the while but We wanted
to be complimentary, you know And
there. poor we there We were-in q fix
Had We said that she shonc like mud
fence" where would We be to-day. 1t is
horrible to contemplate.
We now became desperate and swore, 10y
all the starry worlds that swung in space,
that henceforth and forevcrmore we would
say what we pleased, and say it just how we
pleased; but if possible, offend no one. We
next announced, innocenty Of course, that
we regretted to hear that one of our former
residents was now an inmate of the Chicago
Insane Asylum, We announced this on
what we thought good authority, but i'm
mediatcly received complimentary, UNI
tinted and unperfumed note informing US
that we were more fit for the asylum than
was the person sent thero. On receipt OF
this We prayed God to forgive u aud
commenced carrying concealed weapons.
We now commenced feeling like an old
man OF sixty. All youthful enjoyment
had lost their charms and We were growing
hump. backed from the abuse heaped upon
our youthful head. We felt, in fact, like
old Davis always undoubtedly fecls-like a
very guilty and wicked and worthless old
sinner.
at seems TO me but yesterday" In fact
it was only day before Yesterday that, in
our Personal Chips we announced that
there are a man in our town who .re a
damphool" We were right. There
ARE" such man. but not less
than half dozen men yestcr
day demanded to know who in HI we
meant, and If 10y Cd We meant them, our
backbone be knocked through our button
hole. We had with rs our concealed wca-
pons, but could not but help thinking Of
the beauty of having body guards, too
And then the baby which We sad had
made its arrival IN this city Saturday, and
which weighed ten pounds naked, The
fact was very impres,ivcly brought home TO
Us that no such baby had arrived, and hence
could not have weighed ten pounds net,
and that unless the correction va, made to-
day our prospect Tor becoming a gone
gozIin was very fine and large.
And then those evening papers, you
know, when we call one Of them our first
love" the other becomes jealous and pouts.
We cant kiss both of the old ladie, at one
time, and unless we do, We, with our young,
peaceful and patriotic heart can never
again trod the pleasant paths OF peace. We
are therefore tircd-tircd OF localizng-
| Tired o. the hollow. the base, the untrue,
! Harrer Oh Iarrr' our heart longs tor you.