Litchfield enquirer., 1879-07-31
CLIPPINGS,

These Germans do mix things up. They re- fer to man as herr.
 A mirror is the only tolerated reflection up- on the beauty of woman.
 Lemonade witli water in it is meeting with deadly results in Indiana .if
 Why are good resolutions like saualng baby at church? Because they should always be carried out f. Many young man who sows his wild oats trusts to the grasshopper of forgetfulncss to destroy the crop ft F
 Wealth is parceled out to those who inherit it, those who steal it, and those who dig for it.
 The women who said she wouldn't marry the best man living compromised by taking the worst.
 Charley de Flnkey has discovered why gos- pei tents attract so many sinners They mls- take them for circuses.
 Upon the adjournment of Congress. Aleck Stephens, it is Said crawled into an envelope and franked himself home
 A tombstone with a simple cucumber carved upon it is oftentimes more expressive than one carved with ten thousand lines of obituary poetry.
 Judge-"Have you anything to offer to the Court before sentence is passed on you P" Prisoner-'No, Judge. had $10 but my lawyer took that"
 The removal fsthe duty on quinine is a blessed b0onte the poor What they now save onqHinine pills can be invested in aroth- CT dog, atohacco and cigars. se'sszss
 If Noah had foreseen thefuture and killed the two mosquitoes which took refuge in the ark, he would have rendered, some of the strongest words ia the English language u1l- necessary a y.as T0 ,ia.ss E. iI <1 get jIa
 ''The mills of the gods grind slowly" This is all because the hands ara paid by the day. Will the gods never leaf1 that it is to their in- terest to let ont ntawork by contract. 'S
 The Cleveland HeraM advises Christians to hire steamboat, give a Sunday excursion and then suddenly open religious services on the crowd of loafers. They must either listen or jump overheard.
 If business men would dispatch their busi- ness with one-half the alacrity they bolt their noontide meals, they would have more hours for recreation and less need for dyspepsia rem- edies
 A women raised to the third power of widow hood has the phetographs of her three departed lords in a group, witha vignette ot herself m the centre and underneath is the inscription, The Lord will provide "[~,a-n .,
 Kankakeeehas ajustice wlo beats them n all Ii in the wayof doingnpa job of anaatrimonisl splicing with neatness and despatch. This ris his forlpnla4 Slave 'er2". ..Yes. "a9tsHaye i'm" ssYes, p Married; $2" s47 -. To biIpotato bugs, sprinkle potato. parings with Paris geen, and place between the rows. They leave the vines, sit down before the parings, partake, and die the death of the the transgressor.
 Doctor, said lady who avowed herself ured Of housekeeping, T want my husband to taKe me to Florida this winter. Now, what is the matter with me that renders it necessary for me to go?"
 My asa, said atgsatle,nau to.his wife. our c!ul isgoingto have autle home com. when, pray is our home to have all the 7elub comfortsw ( A -y, | {s--1'~--2 ' - =
 There is scarcely any trouble without wo- man peing at the bottom of it. so when you pass house and hear youngster yelling like Dlue plazess you eap make up your miud that the felegehig' fact accounts for the noise
 One of the old settlers at thesIsIes of Shoals seeing the name of Psyche on the huh of a yacht, the other day, spelled it out slowly. and then exclaimed: "Well, if that ain't the durndest way to spell fish p ,9 at ll' An old Scotch lady gave pointed reply to a minister who knew he had offended her. and expEsssed surprise that she should come so regnlafaysto3s hear him preach. Said she. gospel" ~ VI '''o
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