Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1879-04-04
STORY OF A HERRING.

A nerrlngE ban
My dear sir, will you please to take
reef in your sneer, and give the herring
a chance?
To be sure the poor little smoked and
withered object is at best but a hunger
and d-thirst-inspiring mess; but if you
will follow its career from the time it
got lost from somebody's basket until
it ceased to be used as promulgator of
human happiness, you will in justice to
this odoriferous and much-scorned tinny,
confess that it really had mission.
For practical yet modest wielder of
fate, give me the herring that Ted "
Harper found one night as he was going
after his pretty sister at the Blank thea
ter.
A deceptive parcel it presented, as it
lay on the pavement, wrapped in white
paper, neatly tied around with a string.
lied made grab for it, with thrill
ofjoyous expectation.
"Golly maybe it's bOnanza!" he
exclaimed, rushing toward a restaurant
window near and eagerly scanning his
" find" his dirty little digits trembling
with exciting hopes supposed to be hid
den in "bOnanza."
Hang it! herring!" Oh, the dis
gust, the concentrated disappointment,
contained in the kick that helpless little
fish received as "Ted" flung it from him
into the gutter.
Tied ran his hands down deep into
his pockets, and meditated upon the
shallowness of hope and the hollowness
of life generally. He had not helped
Longfellow write his psalm of Life"
but he was the personifcation of the
line,
"And things are not what they SEEM"
"Hang it all!'' he muttered, "if that
had a-been million bonanza, me and
Nell would a-gone to the Fifth avenue
hotel and lived like gentlemen, and we'd
a-gone to the conternent and got our
names in the papers like high-toners-
by-,Jawgm
This last explosive evidently meant
something quite foreign to his mutter-
ings, for he made sudden dive after the
abused herring, and, wrapping it into
neat parcel again, he assumed mild
and businesslike air, although his eyes
twinkled with some hidden idea, and en-
tered the restaurant.
"Say, mister, buy blindp'"
"a what?" exclaimed waiter.
"A blind "a something what's got
value, and you don't know what It's till
yous paid fer it.n
"Get out, you little vagabond None
of your smart tricks here" the bartend-
er cried with an angry move toward
Ted" but one of the gentlemen pres
ent interfered; saying, with a jocular
glance at "Ted:"
LET him alone. Come here, my boy,
and oriuo of S1linI ~
But "Ted made for the door and would
have escaped if he had not been caught
by the speaker, who laughingly wanted
to know what was in the parcel.
"How shud | knowPn ''Tedn retort-
ed, with the wit of an embryo politi-
clan. "'Taint no put-up job, honor
bright-'taint!"
"Where did you get itp"
Found it right outside Of this here
door,"
The gentleman took the package from
"Ted'sn reluctant grasp, fingered it,
smelt of it and with knowing smile at
lied, remarked:
Found it, did you, and, supposing
some of us lost it, thought you would
sell it for the rewardP"
Yeas" the young speculator drawl-
| ed, looking down at the end of his nose,
that he was diligently scratching to
avoid meeting the humorous scrutiny OF
his interlocutor; then added, courteously
I" must go. My sister she's a-watin
for me to take her home, and guess the
theater is out now"
"Oh, no, it's time enough yet for an
other act" the gentleman replied, de-
tanning Ted by gentle force. as
your sister young and prettyP"
you bet! Tied cried with enthu
siasm, "and she is going to be second
Lolita after awhile. You see, she aim
been at it long yet; but she gets enough
money already to support men her!"
so you are a pair of orphans, arr
youp"
:" | should think so. We amt Away
been poor, neither; but after mothe
died father he took opium worse thai
ever, and nobody didn't buy his picture
and he had no money to buy paint
Then my uncle you know him a
plays the three balls-he got hold O
father, land it didn't take long to us
us up after that" Tied" said this las
with solemn wisdom, Joined with
sorrowful comprehension of his famil
troubles that was as touching as ridicu
lous-touching from its apparent truth
and ridiculous in its effort to invite at
tention to the fact that the little nara
tor was not of common "scrub stock"
lied had by this time quite an aud
ence, who became interested in hi
wor rdly-wlse, ingenious little face, an
when his first friend proposed an "auC
tion," then and there, to dispose of ths