The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1879-01-08

on this particular night that such glamour
of pair, darkened my eyes? bad borne all
this for years-why this fever and fret?"
Alasl was a child then, unsatisfed, but
scarce knowing what had lost. Now had
grown suddenly to be woman, with my
woman's heart ciamoring to be heard.
Meanwhile the night crept on, and the
great question was yet unsettled. Darkness
gathered over the faces was watching Jane
rose and flung few dried branches on the
fire, and rudy blaze lighted up the hither-
to cherries room. glanced at my husband.
The freight shone soft and warm on his
dark and not unhandsome face Ny poor
hungering heart fancied there was soften.
ing about the lines of the hard mouth. OH
if Jane would but leave the room-leave US
for few brief moments alonel Perhaps /
might yet be able to reach the fountains OF
his sluggish soul.
As if IN answer to my prayer-every wish
is prsyer-Jane passed into the kitchen.
/ instinctively smoothed my hair, and
glanced in the small mirror ornamenting the
old. fashioned clock on the mantle.
/ was handsome woman. Roses famed
upon my cheek, and my dark hair was
glossy and abundant. l had dressed it in
becoming fashion, and had attired myself in
ribbon at nay throat
Impelled by something, know not what,
I went over to where my husband sat, and,
kneeling, laid my head upon his knee
cay, Martha, girl, you jostled me" and he
went on reading his paper as unconcernedly
as though a heart was not breaking at his
feet. The aching of my brain almost
strangled me, bat would not be driven off.
Oh, if he had only laid his baud upon my
head! II he had only spoken one tender
world
at is prayer meeting evening" Jane said,
coming in ere had time to regain my feet
care you going tonight, Martha?"
Yes, would go this lest right" God help
mel l needed prayer.
John, will you go with me?' faltered
out. strange yearning possessing me at the
last moment.
mo, 1 am tired" he said, without lifting
mis- eyes from his paper.
went out into the darkness desperate
half-maddened woman. heard Jane say as
l closed the door:
You should go out with Martha, some
times, John. People are beginning to talk
about it."
went into the house of God, but the
words of prayer fell with an unmeaning
sound upon my dulled ears.
The pastor took for his text the words,
Beloved of God"-that much heard. Who
were these people, beloved of God?' Not
Martha Lester, tried, and tempted, and soul
sick.
One or two of my female acquaintance
greeted me as they passed out leaning upon
the arms of their husbands. l saw other
for the night was cold and the road crusted
with ice. / saw one man draw the sha vi
closer about the shoulders of pale, faded
faced looking woman, and my throat filed
almost to suffocatlon.
1t was bitter cold but the winter winds
greater chill at my heart.
| paused a moment on the brow of Meet
ing House HILL" It was prime coasting,
and most of the young folks of the village
were enjoying the sport. One bright girl OF
II, with crimson scarf tied over her pretty
head, espied me Just as she was calling out
| IN a musical voice the signal, "Trala-la, y
and exclain ed gayly:
Come, Mrs. Lester, my sled carries double.
Family you are girl again, and let me take
| you down behind me-"
A girl againl Oh to be a girl once more
after being weary woman for so many
years. To be Il again for that short hour.
/ To taste again of our sweet youth
/ staggered blindly across the common,
| striking by accident the path conyerging
! to my home: for the "blackness of darkness
! had settled over my aching eyes,
| Ere reached the. door L had decided to
! leave John Testers home forever; TO put
leagues and leagues between me and the
man who had sworn to cherish and protect
/ me, and who had, instead, outraged every
/ feeling of my nature and blighted my
! whole life.
| My husband sat browsing over his paper
Jane had fallen asleep over knitting.
| I passed directly to my own apartments
and taking down my plainest dress folded it
and a change of clothing, in a small bundle
and laid it upon a chair, ready to start forth
! from my home as soon as the gray dawr
should break over the hills.
This was twenty years ago, and tonight
am inmate of John Testers home still
| Shall 1 tell you why 1 still dwell beneath
the roof of him who has darkened all my
! life?
On that night of anguish and temptation
l had forgotten all, save my own wretched
ness, till, turning from my dreary "pickin,
| up" l saw q little bed, and beside it a tin,
pair OF boots and q sled marked Water
Witch" and on that bed was slumberini
| my little son, inst six years old.
Surely the strong brain of Martha Leste
must have been crsZed with anguish, els
would she never have forgotten the chile
| that was dearer to her than her own llf
blood.
1 fell upon my knees beside the rosy, happ.
| sleeper, moaning out:
80 God, help me! help mel Try me no
beyond my strength to bear. o Thol
| Mighty One. be merciful, / am but q wo
mana woman tempted soreW
That boy was all I had 10 love; bone of m.
bone and flesh of my flesh. For his sake
haye borne this martyrdOm all these years
knew John Testers hard nature. knev
he would never give the boy up to me.
knew the law gave the custody of the chill
dren to the father, so l bowed my proud
spirit, and for the little sleeper's sake untie'
my bundle, placed my clothes in their sccus
toned places, and accepted my destiny.
This is glorious land in which We live
land OF liberty Yet a Christian mother
right to her children is little better than
slave mother'ei
Omen and brothers! some day in you
wise counsels repeal this unholy law.
For my boys sake 1 went back TO my oil
life. 1t would have been better for us {
have gone forth, my boy and I-my owl
for the soul of Martha Lester. There woul
have been less sin, less bitterness of hear
The boy would have grown up only in a
atmosphere of love. The mothers tor
heartstrings would have knit anew.
But the world decides for women in sue
eases. and the law binds her with . tripl
chain.
Things settled back into their old way