The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1879-10-11
Il SenSiCl1 HllIllOrist

We left Portland in the evening and ,
blt OF storm. There was heavy sea
with its usual depressing Influences. Th,
sea grew roughcr, and as the pitching o.,
rolling OF the good steamer New York in
creased my spirits did not rise. You
spirits are not apt to rise, find They arc
the only things about you that don't rise
| however.
My subject of reflection having cludc(
my rather inactive mind, | became sensible
OF kind of sort of languor that sug-
gcstch reposc. did not feel like standing
up and singing. | wanted rcpose | wasn't
particular what kind of rcposc that of tho
grave would have suited ne perfectly well.
But there was no grave handy. And
whcn | went out and looked out to scnwart]
and gazcd at the lanllcss cxpanse of angry,
tossing waters, ! didn't see any material to
make grave And then, when returned
10 The statcroom, il began to dawn upon
me, very dimly, that the rcpGsc was about
| us seldom rs the grave. The ocean made
me feel us though | had swallowed il
whole, and was afraid l would have to
spread a little to hold IL.
believed | would retire and abandon
the strugg glc with my feelings, for | felt
was on the verge of quoting poetry. |
stood on my Ccct and took off some of nv
things. Then | leaned up against the door
and took off n few. Then | stood on NV
head and got Off one or two. Then | Inv
down on my back and kicked off the rest
of them.
Then looked up at my berth.
1t was GOO feet from the floor and was
still going
cast an anxious, dcspailing glance at it,
reached out and dragged a travelling shaw
over me and tried to warblc Il merry stave
When % iSoHg SfG my SyIS IpSIissagc OF the ln,crna
tional Steamship Company, did not con-
tract to sleep in skyrockct, and that
should not get into berth until 1t came down
close enough for me to grab at 1t.
The sense of utter forlorncss, thc feelings
of dcsolation and goncncss; the impression,
generally correct That every well person in
the ship IS laughing at you /; the saddcning
thought that there is no chance of dying
the depressing knowledge that there is no
help for it, anyhow; the confidence that
nobody is going to do anything for you, and
the philosophical resolution rcd cent if thew
don't; the hope that you will be over it by
morning; the fear that it will last week
the forlorn hope, now and then, that tho
piio' WI SSI lSHtChClt utitl tlC IIlC SillD up
to tree at some place only for little
while; the dcspairing sense of disapDoint-
ment that steals over you as it becomes cvi-
dent that tho pilot hasn't the rcmotcst
thought of doing anything of the kind; and
NJ last tho tcrvcnt, earnest, dcspairing wish
that the boiler will blow up, tho ship strike
a rock, catch on fire, capsizc, be run down
by an iron steamship get struck by light
ming and sink in 600 fathoms of water, and
do il all most powerful quick, too. This is
the final spasm.
Why, cvon after fell asleep, dreamed
that | was boy again; happy, guilelcss,
barefoot boy, and that l was in Peoria, sit
ting behind tho woodshcd in the old
yard on Monroe street, where the postofllcc
now stands, making, in boyish solitude, my
maiden efforts on my first and most ser
rcptitious cigar. And dreamed that the
cigar was just about half smoked out, and
was lying on the chopping-block beside mo,
and that tho curtain had just rung for the
second act.