The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1879-04-26
WHIPS: WISE HND WIEFY.

The day after washing day is one of sad
irony.
worth $40, 900. " Bit was left to him by
an uncle,
To make your collar last-makc your
shirts first.
The Rome Sentinel thinks a healthy In
dian is a we'll red man
The right man in the right place-a
husband at home i'll the evening.
1t isn't every bridge builder who wants
TO he tried by Il jury of his piers.
An exchange tells of a young man who
swore off smoking and in five years he was
Patience is taught bya fish rod and line
having a worm at one end and Il man at the
other.
SO close is the sympathy between night
and day, that after one falls til. other
breaks.
Now that the thunderstorm season has
prompt at prayers.
If man will tell me what he thinks ov
his nabors, kan tell him what his Majors
think of him.-.Josh Billings.
The amount of pin money required by
the married woman depends on whether
she uses diamond pins or rolling pins
A country exchange, in speaking of an
accident to q valuable horse, says that the
owner was obliged to shoot her to save
her life
"A New York woman is accused of sell
ing superb pair of black horses because
they We're not becoming to her now she had
stopped dyeing her hair yellow"
distinguished divine to recent convert:
I've proposes to baptize you by the Turk
ish bath method 1t is really the only way
to scrub your years of sin out of you
That cheerful idiot on the New Orleans
Times, whose chief idea of joke is to
credit funny paragraphs t" the Scientific
american and Christian .1drocate, is still at
his work-Cin. sci. Wight.
Three hundred tramps were vaccinated
in New York the other night. The best way
to vaccinate tramp is with a shot gun.
This prevents him from taking the small
pox and a farmers chickens.
A Massachusetts man has invented a
lightning grinder" Such a thing may
be needed in New England, but hercabouts
unground lightning is generally considered
sharp enough for all practical purposes.
You say the frost comes out Of the
ground in the spring: bur where does il
stay during the warm weather. lo, are
clearly wrong: il goes into the ground in
the spring and comes out again in the fall.
That was clever Oakland hoy, who,
when he was given Ss to dig mp his aunt 5
garden, hid two bit piece III it and then
told all the boys i'll the ncighborhood. The
next morning the ground was pnlverized
two feet deep
Two darkcys We're Wanting their cour-
age. II isn't feared o nothin, isn't
said one. Den, Sam, reckon you ism t
feared to loan me a dollar - "No, Julius.
| isn't feared to loan You dollar. but |
does hate 10 part wild an old frien forebher.
"A Partisan landlord objected t" ten
ant who had either dogs or children. A
gentleman executed his bail in the name OF
his child. brought the latter to occupy the
rooms, and assured the enraged landlord
that the baby was his tenant, and the par
ents its visitors
An exchange relates that colored child
had a fall from second story window, tn,
other day, and the mother, in giving an &c
count of the incident ut a grocery store
said: "Dere dat child was coming down
feet fnst, wild every chance of being killed
when lie Lawd he turned him over, dc chile
struck on his head, and there wasn't SC
muck az button flew of.