Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1879-05-09
NO. 80.
JOSEPH, Cook.

State Journal is attracting consider
able attention because of its sever
lty and by reason of the action of
the orthodox ministers at Madison
in censuring the Journal for its
publication, Although it plainly
shows that the Journal is not pos
sessed otthat charity which endures
all things and suffers all things we
believe the attack was not entirely
without proyocation,
1T was not u very large audience
that assembled in tho lccturc-room
of the NJ, l.. Church, last night, To
hear Joseph Cook, of Boston, talk
upon Tho Ccrtaintics of Religion"
But II would have been much
smaller had our people moro fully
appreciated the fact that as n lec-
turcr Cook is the dullest man ON
the American platform. And it
may be quito safely asserted that
scarcely u bakers dozen of his last
nights auditors will ever care to
hear Joseph Cook again
upon what basis, other than tho
popular titles Of his lectures, Cook
ever became recognized at Boston
or elsewhere as among the great
thinkers Of his time, we fail to con-
ccivc. His lecture, last evening,
was n very successful effort To
drown out stale but half.lledged
ideas, in mn ocean of meaningless
words and stilted definitions, suli-
cicntly abhorrent toevery intelligent
hearer. A ponderously- large man,
in close-htting, black frock; with
massive head, which he keeps "in
frenzy rolling" and continually
pats with brawny hands, evidently
to call attention TO the master in-
tcllcct contained within; n fresh,
peoch-blow complexion, that gives
Indication Of u diet Of raw beef;
shaggy eyebrows, from under which
n pair Of large fshcy eyes gleam at
| you with impertncnt stare; Il full
beard Except the upper lip) gives
wcighty dignity toa oountcnanco
on which sits cnthroned an owl
like wisdom, perceptibly enforced;
n pair of arms which swing like
slcdgc hammers, or beat his breasts
with hollow resonance, or pat his
massive brain this is the man who
bellows and puils and blows up
and down the spacious platform,
and whose every linenment and
coat wrinkle cries out i'm atcnto-
rion tones: "l'm Joseph Cook,
who represents the culcha and tho
intellect Of Boston.r
we despair attempting to rolnte
what Joseph said, last night; il
would DO less difficult to detail
whnt he did not say. Ills alleged
subject was "The Certainties of Re-
ligi on" we are soon To go hence
ward, he said (this is Cook-ism for
"we are soon to die'D; we want to
90 hencewnrd in peace; we cannot
go hcnceward without being in har-
nony with our Creator. Nothing
alarming fresh in these truisms.
Nothing but what has been preach
ed a hundred thousand times, and
each time doubtless with more
force and more originality than
Cook threw into the discussion, last
night--unless force consists in bell
lowing and trying to loosen tho
planks Of tho platform; unless or
iginality consists in loosing an
avalanche Of ponderous, unmean-
ing sentences and far fetched def
nitions upon tho heads of a devoted
audience, which are supposed to
sit and admire the pedantic twaddle
as being scientific language, because
Cook utters it. Perhaps it is origi-
nal and scientific, for instance, to
refer to a common chimney as "a
black-mouthed aperture for the
escape Of neither fres;' but it is not
original to talk an audience to death.
and that is the chief forte of
Joseph Cook Of Boston. II is
really time that the American public
were rid Of this mountebank in
religion and psychology; and it is
consoling 70 hear that Boston, where
! they have sadly sinned against IL.