The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-08-29
PERSONAL AND PARTICULAR.

DuSlltSS.
Jolly tars have often benzine filed
with turpentine.
Pretty women's wear often makes
naughty men swear.
A sympathetic dodge-dodging a
brick thrown at another man.
Water runs away like money. When
the river is low the banks
Before marriage, affection and per-
fiction; after, reflection and detection.
He that to laughter never giveth
birth;
Is dead-at least, he's passed away
from mirth.
The girl who can't aver shoot a
marble straight is the one who is irwin
chile at archery.
If you think education is on the de-
cline, 60 out and peruse the ortho-
graphy of a circus bill.
When a man resorts to perfumery, he
lets it be known that he has little con-
fidence in his own sweetness.
If we are to be crushed, we prefer it
to be by the scorn of pretty woman,
rather than by a falling building.
During the prevalence of the very
warm weather it is quite natural for one
to ask: Why does the liver pad?
Diamonds, it is said, attract the
lightning. That explains why SO many
wear twenty-iiye-cent anne rings.
A recent love story is entitled "The
Shadow of a Grief" Why not have
called it ''The Sunshine of a Cramp?"
To any clever married man: DON'T
blush to acknowledge your merit, if
your wife's relatives admit you have
any.
1t is a wonder more life insurance
solicitors are not killed than we know
of-they are always taking so many
risks.
Americans pay morefor teeth than any
other nation Oh the earth, and yet they
do nine-tenths of their chewing with
their stomachs.
The sun shines for all, the moon for
the favored few; but how like the mis-
chief the stars wink at what is going
on beneath them.
Sitting Bull says he is looking for a
p1onn Of vnct rrhnra 1a nm CLAM on,nl
ly, should pitch his tent in a store that
is never advertised.
A a who habitually treats other
mems wives more politely than he does
his own, will have to pay cash in adj
vance at this Office.
That fellow who had just been Tilted
by a girl, to whom he had been show
ing attention for a long time, carried
his heart on his leave.
"What a delightful fellow that Ed
ward $50 jolly-his pocketbook al
ways open" N-"Yes; to anyone that
wants to put anything into it.
Statistics prove that women's teeth
decay at an earlier age than mems,
which c~onclusively proves that spruce
gum is more injurious than tobacco.
What makes so many boys turn out
bad is probably the quality of the corn
starch that adulterates Sunday school
ice cream. Corn starch for Sunday
school ice cream purposes should be
pure.
1t may be that the simple minded
farmer has no selfish design in telling
the tourist that fish will only bite at
potato bugs, and kindly offering to let
the disciple of Walton go into the pot
alto patch and get all the bait he wants.
A woman who can balance and swing
in a trapeze for half an hour, fairly
making your nerves crawl for fear that
she will exemplify the laws of gravit-
alton in a hurry, is competent to WELD
the ballot, and ought to be kept voting
all the time.
"Where do all the flies come from?"
querulously demanded old Mr.. Gunny-
bags, waving his hands frantically
over his tormented head. THAT isn't
the question" replied his equally tor
mented partner; ''when are they going
back again?-that's what l want to
know.n
Many people look upon A. H. Step
hens as an enormous logician. Here is
his style of logic: us this thing SOP
Certainly. Applause and "Goodl"l Is
this other thing not SOP Certainly
not. [Long continued applause. Then,
my friends, l hayeAproved that this
thing is so. Agreed. Then l have
also, per contra, proved that this other
thing is not SO, Agreed. And, my
friends, l am willing to prove this to
the whole country "[Deafening appla-
use.
Ladies ought to enjoy reunions or
banauets much better than men, be-
cause they. can sit perfectly unconcern-
ed and listen to all the good things
that are being said without any danger.
of being called up Unexpectedly to re-
spond to a toast, and being obliged to
wish the POSTMASTER and all the rest OF
the company were 1t the bottom of the
sea. And still some women grumble
about the hard lot of feminine mortal
ity.
One day Billy and Sammy were play
ing in a mud hole, and Billy said: