davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
One Of John Phenix's Stories.

Out in certain Western fort, some
time ago, the major conceived that artil-
lcry must be used effectively in fighting
the Indians by dispensing with gun
carriages and fastening the cannon upon
the backs of mules So he explained
his views to the commandant, and it was
determined to try the experiment. A
ilowitzer was selected and strapped upon
an ambulance mule, with the muzzle
pointing toward the tail. When they
had secured the gun and loaded it with
ball cartridge, they led the calm and
steadfast mule out on the bluff and set
up target in the middle of the river to
practice at. The rear of the mule was
turned toward the target, and he was
backed gently up to the edge of the
bluff. The officers stood round in q
semicircle, while the major went up and
inserted a time fuse in the vent of the
howitzer When the fuse was ready,
the major lit it and retired. In minute
or two the hitherto unruffled mule heard
the fizzing back on his neck, and it made
him uneasy. Hereached his head round
to ascertain what was going on, and as
he did so his body turned, and the
howitzer began to sweep. around the
horizon The mule at last became ex-
cited, and his curiosity became more
and more intense. In second OF two
he was standing with his four legs in a
bunch, making six revolutions per
minute, and the howitzer threatening
sudden death to every man within half
a mile. The commandant was observed
to climb suddenly up tree; officers
were seen sliding over the bluff into the
river, as if they didn't care at all about
the high price Of uniforms; the adju-
tant made good time toward the fort; a
sergeant began to throw up breastworks
with his bayonet; the major rolled over
and groaned. In moment or two there
was puff of smoke, and u dull thud.
and the mule-oh, where was hei A
solitary brute might have been seen
turning successful back somersaults over
the bluff, only to rest at anchor finally
with his howitzer at the bottom Of the
river, while the ball went off toward the
fort, hit the chimney in the majors
quarters, rattling the adobe bricks down
into the parlor, and frightening the
majors wife into convulsions. They
do not allude to it now, and no report
of the result of the experiment was ever
sent to the War Department.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
Suicides in Central Park.

When Central Park was laid out and
opened to the public, which took, and
has taken ever since, so much pride and
pleasure in it, says New Y ork paper, it
was hardly thought that it would be the
field for suicides that it has become. 1t
is remarkable how many persons 60
there to end their unhappy lives.
Scarcely week passes that the body of
some unfortunate is not found there with
sufficient accompanying evidence to
show that death has been self-intiicted.
So common has this grown to be that
the park patrolmen have received or
ders, when going on duty in the morn
ing. to search the shrubbery and Sc
cluded places for suicides. In case of
attempted suicide, relief might come in
time to do good, because many persons
bent on self-destruction are naturally so
nervous that they handle their weapons
clumsily, often making wounds that
may be healed Usually, however, the
suicides perform their CHASTITY work eff
fectually. Suicide is not a pleasant as
sociation with the city's favorite prom
enade and pleasure ground, but it is
hard to see how it can be prevented.
Certainly no legal enactments will be
apt to restrain man who has decided to
destroy himself. 1t is said that an order
was once conspicuously posted in Pho
nix Park, Dublin, to the effect that any
body who should be detected commit
ting suicide there should be compelled to
paw a fine of twenty-five shillings. The
difference between Frenchmen and
Americans is exhibited in the choice of
places for COMMITTING suicide. The for
mer very rarely choose any retired spot
| in the Bois de Boulogne. They usually
prefer to make way with themselves in
the most public and melodramatic man.
ner, leaping from the Arc de Triomphe,
the Column of the Place Vendome, OF
| the Tour de Saint Jacques. Americans
and Anglo-Saxons generally seek some
out-of-the-way spot to end themselves,
where they know that there will be lit
tie danger Of interruption-where they
can feel surer of executing their fatal in
tent.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
An Iron War Shirt.

An iron shirt was recently left at the
Office Of the Alexandria (Va.) Gazette by
some one who found it in house that
had been occupied by Union troops dur
ing the closing months OF the war.
This iron-clad chemise resembles some
what the armor of a crusader, and is
made of ten pieces of heavy boiler iron.
or it may be plates Of thin steel, all
iointed by movable rivets, which allow
the shirt to be disjointed and packed up.
A portion of it is hinged SO as to allow
motion to the limbs. This mobile en-
ceinte or personal fortress was fitted on
in front like dicky, but extended down
far enough to cover the thighs. The
Gazette says: "Its inventor evidently
deemed the shirt useful invention, for
the sample on our desk is marked on one
shoulder in brass, like an epaulette,
patent applied for and on the other,
Made by Atwater Armory Co., New
Haven, Conn The marks, /. A. A.,
which, we suppose, indicate that must
Avoid Accidents are the only other in
scriptions found upon this work Of art. :
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
Heroes In journalism.

Memphis presents fresh example OF
the faithfulness of the journalist The
city is literally dead, there is positively
nothing doing in the way of business,
yet the papers appear as regularly as
ever, and it has, of course, never oc-
CURED to the editors-to suspend publi-
cation, and. like the merchants of the
place, close their establishments. Ger
tainly they 20 on at loss, for all the
sources of their profits are shut. The
newspaper is ever the last to succumb.
IF its Office burn down, it is out the next
morning with "a full account of the
confederation. The fires which de-
stroyed Chicago and Boston only
scorched the newspapers, though their
buildings were laid low. The war
record of the Memphis ArGld7sche can
not be forgotten-how it carried its
presses from point to point as the Union
armies advanced, and printed its edition
everywhere and anywhere, but always
somewhere. The religion of the jour
nalist is his trade. To him it is sin to
fy from Ills desk at the appearance OF
danger. Like the general at the head OF
his army, he would be forever disgraced
in his own eyes if the enemy, coming IN
what shape it might, did not find him
in command. L ne income OF tlle Aielu-
phis editor stops, but his expenses do
not. He fights for Others and pays for
the privilege. He urges courage. He
i 50 little frightened BY Yellow Jack
that he takes him by the buttonhole and
laughs with him. He tells his fellow
citizens never to lose hope. He Sits
out the truth from the wild stories fly
ing about, and kills despair by show,
. L -. al
worse than they are. He points
gleefully to the future. and declares
that Memphis must and will recover
her old-time prosperity. Imagine, II
you can, Memphis in this hour Of its
sore trial without its press. Think OF
the ravages of the dead visitor, unree-
corded, with only the alarmed people
to tell one another who still lived;
with the whole world silent, with no
word of encouragement to reach the
public Philadelphia Times.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
Paris and France.

The Paris correspond ent of the lead
ing English journal quotes Prince Bis
marck as saying: "There are, really, as
it were, two Frances-the France Of
Paris and the France of the Provinces.
The France of Paris is a vain, pleasure
seeking, agreeable, extravagant France,
which makes revolutions, declares war
and has no idea of economizing. Every
body brings money to it, and it squanders
everything. But alongside it is the
other France, the true France, that Of
the provinces, which labors hard, is
sober and saves. The latter pays for al
the freaks and follies of the other.
When the former makes a revolution, it
is the latter that suffers. When the
former declares war, it is the latter that
fights, though the provincial Frenchman
dearly loves the soil, and there is no
greater sacrifice for him than to leave
It for military service. When / was in
France, / took a great interest in the
soldiers, and often talked with them.
Their whole desire was to get through
the service and return to the fields. If
the peasants were listened to. France
would never make war; and yet he
fights well when he does fight. When he
is beaten he is sorry; when he wins he
is pleased; but, victor or vanquished,
what is clearest to him is that victory or
defeat alike bring the war to an end and
allow him to 20 home again"
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16

There has been controversy among
railroad engineers as to the speed Of
trains, some contending that it was i'm
possible to go at the rate of mile a
minute. One day recently test was
made on the fast train of the Pennsyl-
vania railroad between Philadelphia and
New York. which makes no stops for a
mantown Junction and Jersey City.
Five miles were passed over in exactly
four minutes and fifty-five and quart Ell
seconds. At another point three miles
were made in two minutes and thirty
six seconds. No extra speed was made
on this train, which consisted of four
cars, containing 1853 passengers. The
engineers of the Pennsylvania railroad
assert that there are dozen trains every
day that make mile a minute on every
trim.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
FOR THE FAIR SEX.


Red bonnets will continue to be worn
this winter.
Bibbons are twilled this year instead
of being of satin. qgf
Both hats and cottage bonnets will
continue in fashion.
Dotted net ruches will be substituted
for lace this winter.
Silk. beaver will be worn for elegant
walking-hats this winter.
Baby belts of ribbon will continue in
fashion throughout the winter.
Bronze beads win take the place of
the rainbow beads of last year.
An immense variety of new tints in
silk and velvet has been imported.
Frog green. copper green and North
Pole blue are among the new tints.
Crackle velvet, looking like bits of
porcelain, is to be used for trimmings.
A new kind Of plush has alternate
stripes of repped satin and uncut loops.
Velvet, with the ground of one colol
and the pile of another, is to be revived.
Sulphur is mixed with pink in some
French costumes prepared for the au-
tumn.
Faceted balls of jet, followed out until
they are as light as down, are used for
bordering bonnets.
The case of Worth against the Prince
Murat for a bill of 81, 800 will soon come
up in the French courts.
Overdresses of colored muslin in
scrolls and flowers are worn over dress
offoulard for evening dress.
Long mantles are announced as the
coming winter wrap for ladies who do
not adopt the cloth street suits.
Stephanotis is mixed with orange
flowers in some bridal wreaths. The
fragrance is rather oyerpowering.
Long-napped plush in all the new
shades is likely to be used for both the
outer and inner trimmings of bonnets
next season.
The crowns of bonnets will be either
folded or laid smooth or puffed this win
ter, and one style will be as fashionable
as the other.
Striped ribbons, and those of changea-
BILE twills, will replace those of satin
next season. They will be wider than
those worn last year.
Painted satin, to be used for trimming
light dress bonnets, has a ground of
ivory, cream, dauphin- gray or old-gold,
and figures of Indian design.
The silks called glace are ld-fashioned
changeable silks, no more, no less. This
year some of them are plain, and some
have satin stripes ofsolid color.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
Gardening for Ladies.

1t is quite refreshing to read such a
da nty little story as this, told by Julia
Coleman:
s' l know lady whose sensible doc
tor told her twenty years ago that she
was half gone with Consumption and
that her only chance for life was to be
in the open air as much as possible. A
perfect bower of paradise was her little
yard. Was the soil poor? She enriched
it. Were here varieties Indifferent She
procured better. Nearly all theIfowers
were fragrant. Fifteen kinds of roses
bloomed under her hands and success
sion of flowers filled out the summer
One side of the yard was covered with
grapes. Peaches, plums and raspberries
were trained en- espGlier, and choice
squashes ripened on the roofs of the out
houses.
Tomatoes were trained to single
poles and yielded luxuriantly, and ruby
straw berries peeped out even from the
bleaching grass. She herself was as
fresh and vigorous as you could expect
one to be whose half-decayed lungs had
left her with insufficient vitality. But
her life was sa Ved and it has been a
happiness to herself and blessing to
Others"
She is right, too. when she says that
more than half the credit for the orna-
mentation of our dooryards and homes
is due to the ladies who push the men up
to their duty Woman at Work.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16

An Allegheny physician, who, in his
way, is a great wag, tells story of a
north side gentleman who for years has
suffered from periodical attacks Of what
ia medical parlance is known as superior
bital neuralgia. Quinine proved of no
effect, and the sufferer was almost erazed
with pain. A kind-hearted old lady
living in the neighborhood ofthe patient
informed him that if he would cut the
affected nerveswith s. pair OF scissors or
knife it would give him no further
trouble. 1t SO happens that the super
orbital nerve is the one which controls
the action of the eyelid, and when man
is in liquor this nerve becomes para-
lived, aud it is this that gives drunken
person such comical expression about
the ewes. The neuralgia patient no
sooner heard what he supposed the wei
come news from the old lady than he
repaired to a closet and with = jack
knife parted in twain the offendin
nerve, and he nows greets his FRIENDS
with his right eye as sober as = Quaker
ia a quarterly meeting, and the left inta
highly intoxicated condition Pitts
bssrgh ga Leader.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
Now, Louisa, said. sternly, there

~ Now, Louisa | said, sternly, there
Is mystery here which you only can
solve. You are committing daily sin
in leaving this upon Aliee's name, and
you must tell me the truth
Z "And so, fairly groveing on the floor
at my feet, she did tell it.
1t appeared that, prompted by sill J
vanity, she had gone up to Sallie's room
to try on the cross; hearing footsteps,
she had been in panic, and not know
ing what to do. had thrust 1t into the
pocket of Aliee's jacket, which was lying
on the bed. Then before she had time
or chance to remove it the search was
made and Alice's jacket not within her
reach. g tri1Efts tGI3
s After that, cowardice prevailed, and
her jealousy prompted her as well to
silence.
Il think never saw anything so pitt
able as the poor weak minded creature
weeping and wailing over her story with
scarcely any comprehension of the terri
Bile wrong she had inflicted.
tsOf course we insisted upon the story
being told to the assembled school, but
pity for Louisa's weak nature induced
Miss Lennox to soften it where it was
possible.
Louisa went directly to her home,
and Burtnet soon forgot her.
"Do you think it WIS not joyful day
when we brought our Alice backp
''She came in positive triumph; not
to Mrs. Lees ever again, but to dear
Miss Lennox, and from there home with
me for the holidays"
The door opened as Cousin Esther
finished, and her brothers wife, our
darling Cousin Hope, came into the
room. r.
Here in the dark?" she said, cheerily.
But what became of AliceP" we
"AlicePn said Cousin Essie, mis-
chievously. "Oh, that wasn't her real
name after all. 1t was Hope Martin,
then; it is your cousin, Hope Lang,
now"
And as we all gathered laughingly
about our pet cousin, Hope, Jenny Lang.
who never allows that story is finished,
said:
"But where is Louisa Bywellp"
"Oh, Louisa?" said Cousin Esther.
:" Poor girl, her lot in life has not been
very agreeable, l am told. She marrieda
clergyman, and she is always getting
him into trouble simply from her lack
of straightforwardness."
And only think" said Cousin Hope,
"that fault of hers was nearly the ruin
of all my life, p Youths Companion.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
ITEMS OF INTEREST.
.reat senses taker-Rum

The great senses taker-Rum.
Liable to drop-sickle rouble-Reapers.
A strong minded woman will always
be speaker of the house.
An agricultural paper says: Brain
farming pays A bald head presents q
clear field for action.
A thousand pounds Of powder was ex-
ploded in quarry near Reading, Pa,
loosening about 10000 tons of stone at
one blast.
American cattle are now imported at
Belfast, ireland, and the trade promises
to grow as large, proportionately, as that
with England.
At long range it is pretty hard to tell
whether q man is playing harmonlca
or gnawing an ear of green corn
Keokuk Gate City.
Here is a fact
Though somewhat funnys
Our sheet each week
Is pressed tor money.
Yonkers Statesman
An Illinois farmer astonished Decatur
by going into that place with train of
six wagons laden with 375 bushels of
barley and drawn by q steam road en-
gine of his own invention
A carpet dealer in Burlington adver-
tiscs g new Brussels carpets that can't be
beat That's the kind we want at our
house. Send US half a dozen; you may
keep the change.-HGsokeye.
1t takes at least three able-bodied men
10 do the guarding for half a dozen pris-
oners, but one good, economical vile
willdo the garden for healthy family
of six.-Keokatb Cons tuition.
One great secret Of domestic enjoy
ment is too much overlooked-that Of
bringing our wants down to our circum-
stances, instead of toiling to bring our
circumstances up to our wants
The laying Of church cornerstone
drew a great crowd to Hagertown, Ind
In tile evening of the same day, an ex-
cursionist was murdered in a bar-room
brawl. AT midnight, mob burned the
building in which the tragedy had taken
place.
The donkey is pretty bird,
So gentle and so wise;
1t has silky little tail
With which to irisk the flies.
Upon its head two ears it bears,
50 silky long and soft,
That when the tail can't reach the flies
The ears can whisk them off.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
VOL.II.
Allow for the Crawl.

You have often, no doubt. had occasion to
note, HfN ~ w
Though the garment at first seemed certain
to please,
That, after some wearing, the sleeve of your
coat
Toward the shoulder was crawling by easy
degrees;
And that's what the clothier; OF course, had in
When he said to the customer, "Long
Not at all.
The sleeve is just right-as you'll presently
find
In cutting a coat we allow for the crawl"
The expression was one. wholly new to me
then;
But set me to thinking how well it applies,
Not merely to coats, but to women and men,
\ In matters of life as they daily arise; 3 4
Consider the shrinkage in human affairs
The promise how great, the performance
how small,
And, lest disappointment should come un-
awares,
Remember the sleeve, and allow for the
CRAWL
The statesman who asks for your ballot to
save
Our country, so rashly imperiled to-day, y
May covet an Office ard not be a knave,
Whatever the fierce opposition may say;
But the 'splatform to which he SO valiantly
clngs, 1
By which he proposes to stand or to fall
Resolutions" remember, are slippery things,
And in politics always "allow for the crawlp'
You are deeply in love with the sweetest OF
girls,
mess brings.
She looks like queen in her beautiful curls,
Like seraph she smiles, like siren she
sings
ALI splendid and vast are the tancies of youth,
But down to the plain facts they must
finally fall
And happy the couple who, finding the truth,
In conjugal kindness "allow tor the crawl p
In brief, recollect that in human affairs,
In social connections in travel and trade,
In courtship and marriage, in sermons and
prayers,
Some grains of concession must always be
made;
In fine, be a prudent though generous man,
Unfriendly to none, and veracious with all;
Believe in your neighbors as much as you can,
But always besure to "allow for the crawl.'
John G. SGze.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
News and Notes for Women.

The Santa Fe (New Mexico) indus
trial school is about to graduate an
Apache Indian girl as teacher.
Rachael Vent worked at blacksmith
ing in Baltimore until her death, short
time ago. She was robustly handsome,
but habitually smoked clay pipe.
Mrs. Emma D. E. N. Southworth, the
novelist, says that she has written con
stantly ever since shawas fifteen years
old. She is now at work on her siXtieth
novel.
Mrs. Estelle johnson, the wife Of ex-
Governor Charles P. johnson, of Mis-
souri,, recently committed suicide at the
family residence by taking arsenic. Grief
over the death Of a child had brought on
mental arrangement.
Julia Clarke, San Francisco factory
girl, was caught in a machine by her
long hair. She seized pair Of shears
and cut off her tresses SO quickly that
she,was not drawn between the wheels
and killed, as she otherwise would have
been.
Ranavalona, Queen of Madagascar,
has issued a proclamation to her subjects
commanding them to send their children
70 SCHOOL, saying InaI IL makes ner glau
to see her subjects wise She adds /:
"And so be all of you diligent, for al
though you do not know the sweetness
of knowledge and wisdom, you will dis
cover it when they become yours"
The painter Ingres says: "To give a
true poise to the figure necessitates an
upright carriage of the head and a
smooth, firm STEP" To give this he re-
commends long walk daily with a
pitcher of water on the head. The hint
is being acted upon by the lady pupils of
an eminent French actor.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16
,TNGLE COPY. FIVE CENTS


z The Philadelphia niaidens, ah 7!
They're worth their weight in nickel
They always travel On the square,
And scorn a man that's tickle.
The Boston girls, how smart they are,
Alas, and how short-sighted
For notwithstanding all they know
They're more or less bean heighted
The girls from Jerseys chilly shore,
To make their breaths smell sweeter,
do masticate musk lozenges-
You've heard OF the musk-eater.
The damsels Of Chicago try
To lead at games quite daring;
And when it comes to some big feat
It's number mines they're wearing.
Now Brooklyn has young ladies, too
BY no means are they willy;
But like its. churches, they essay
TO a spire up quite highly.
Men York Era
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1879-09-16

A man was found dead at Viewpoint,
Ind, with bullet in his head. A hint
at the manner of his death was given by
the evidence of an interrupted game of
poker. In his hand were four kings.
while four queens lay near by, having
probably been dropped by his exasper-
atcd antagonist and murderer