The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1879-07-11
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The faster man Is the faster he eau
run through fortune.
Gala lily by any other n.ms aad i
will smell just as sweet.
1t is best TO look en- the bright si.ls
of things, especially IN mirTor..
A graphic poem speaks Of Old ocean
g crinkled with quivering I,ght."
Venus and Eve were belle, of their
day, but they didn't bang their l.air-
A Brooklyn girl is namci 0sPortu-
nifty. Young men like to enbr4cs her.
A::young lady who is unable u sfas.
ten" one shoald never attempt 20 fasten
eight.
Philosophic angler-I don't catch
many fish but drowned gooi many
worms.
If you desire to make friend Of her
for life, pretend TO mistake her fpr her
daughter.
The most treacberous manoTy ia tie
world belongs to a young
new watch.
American women eat more candy
than all the other women in tbs sorid.
Sweets to the sweet"
"And the iron entered into my sole,p
said Grayhead, as he pulled the tack
out of the bottom Of his slipper.
A young man may do worse things
than write poetry but other bad hab-
its do not so generally afiict the ncigh-
bors.
Next to the modest, shrin ing violet
themost transformations thing n natures
vast and variegated kingdom is the cir
Gus poster.
Next to swearing slamming q door
gives the most relief to an angry person.
Swearing is the most convenient, how
ever.
When boy sees nice, ,round, smooth
stone lying on the ground, he always
thinks it is rather mean that there isn't
yellow dog in the vicinity.
An exchange inquiries: s'Does hang
ing prevent murderf" Certainly it
does. Who ever heard Of man com
mitting murder after ne was hanged I
A pint and a half of st. Louis -whis-
Ky kills a man quicker than q rife
ball. Which is one reason, perhaps,
why st. Louis people don't drink ride
balls.
Piety is the foundation of all virtue
but piety suffers general oonvulsion
when man with white suit on has
to hold the baby and feed it mush and
molasses.
The first symptoms of love in young
man is timidity in girl it is bold
ness. The two sexes have q tendency
to approach, and each assumes the quail
tiles of the other.
A poetess sings: Though I were
dead my heart would beat for thee. :
This would certainly be ssdead beat, :
and it strikes us the poetess assumes too
much poetic license.
MEXICO is at it again, and President
Diaz is greatly encouraged in the hope
that his country viii yet be able to
make 5000 revolutions a minute with
out slipping her eccentric.
Such powerful weather for growing
was never before known. A DAnbury
man who set out raspberry bushes in
the morning, had the preserved fruit
for tea in the evening. Dasabstry NsaOs
A young artist has painted tho pic
ture of dog under tree, and the
work is so artistically done that none
but the best connoisseurs can tell the
bark of the tree from the bark Of the
dog.
/ A servant girl may be a splendid
cook and thoroughgoing Christian
but, at the same time, she will never
hesitate to split up the ironing board
to kindle the fire with in case Of emer
gency.
: "Are You building air castles II
: lSpain, Mr.. Jones g. said 3 landladv e
boarder, who was theughtfully regard.
: ing his cofee-eup. g No, madsme
, only looking over my grounds in Java
! replied Jones.
"I say, you fellows have got qaeel
i notion Of punctuation, shouted an mp
4 town man to an ice-cart driver. Kha
/ makes you put 4 period between ever!
t word On your cart e nOh, that's oaue