The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1879-04-11
PHUNNYGRAPHS.

When a man hasr't a red, he
! gets blue. .'
Talmage's smile would make
first.rate cover for circus Cent.
Men who stand around waiting
for drink show lack of cents.
A man Will sometimes tell few
, natural lies when he goes to natur-
alize.
The Highland-fing dance might
more appropriately be called Hop.
Scotch,
"When was a child / spake ais
a child" and often got spanked for
doing it.
The Mormon question:" How
many wives can l afford to starve
to death 1"
If congress should remove the
tax on matches, it won't cost much
to get married, will iti
The schoolboy manages TO be
more perfect in ''recess" than any
other exercise of the school.
The man who is waiting for
something to. turn up generally
finds it when he steps on a barrel.
hoop.
Let US all be careful. Modjeska
and Di Murska have just been rob-
bed of some very valuable dias
Nmonds.
Chinaman will labor for three
than -. make a nice nuff.box, and
goes fishins' no'u ni' o"'' =" non NO
1T is a base ~, wbaro ono I.d,;
monopolizes pat".' atno'o one i"u
have nine on sias ohousn 70
woman present will say Guy q o'nor
It is fact fully underN.
railroadmen that the lines IL ~
the most long tunnels on the rG6ls
secure the bulk of the bridal tod.
trade. a.... "'l..
Waiter Ito member of the Ohio
legislature): "will you have some
dessert 7" Member Ito waiter) sNo,
thank you; I'll take piece of pie"
Gladstone has been presented
with silver Ratchet. This places
him under an awkward responsibility
for the future. He cannot tell a
lie.
Just at this present date, there
is not "a frst-class stage-cOach rob-
Der in the whole country, and every
body is caying out, "Learn your
boy trade! .as lA-
Life seems a howling wilderness
to man who stands in his bedroom
with a Niagara of water dripping
from his face and hands, and no
towel i'll sight.
"Oh isn't it just glorious ?" was
Princess Louise's exclamation OH
seeing Niagara. Lorne didn't say
much, but kept thinking about the
hack fare.
1t makes an editor mad as thun-
der to read of the way subcriptions
are rolling in to the four per cents,
while he hasn't a new subscriber iD
six manths. ..l r.r..... ...
A correspondent asks us to give
him the amount of the public dept.
We would do it in minutes but We
lett our pOcketbook home in our
other pants.
If an actor is desirous of appear
ing in "several pieces" in one eve
ming, let him smoke a cigar in
factory. He will
bring down the house, too.
The Boston Globe can't see any
reason why q woman shouldn't
have the ballot-box if she wants it,
after the election is over aud there
is no further use for it.
"Geroge, dear, don't yon think
it's rather extravagant of you to eat
butter with that delicious jam 7"
''No love-economical /; the same
piece of bread does for BOTH"
Father "Good evening, Patsy;
it's fine moonlight night" Patsy:
'sIt is, your Holiness but it is not
WO duo thC
dark nights when we won't it."
A little fellow of six years, at the
South End, told one of his elder
brothers that he is ''goiBg to al
ways tell the truth, and then the
boys won't have to 60 to school
on his birthday"
The more common a sin gets to
be, the more striving there is to
hide it lnder name that means
nothing. Texas, having given over
Sunday to t0chicken-fights, callstheA
bird duels.p
There rs to be rage in Paris
or old buttons. In this country
We are not so particular. When
he head of the family goes to put
IN clean shirt Sunday morning,
he rage is for any kind ofbuttons.
Sarcastic Tutor: $50 that's
pherical segment, ehi Then must
onfess | don't understand your
iagram." Cheeky Fresh; ''Oh, ,lon't
out Well, come around after the
our, and I'll explain it to you."
Broken Heart rs the romantic
A. n