The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1879-06-26

LOCOMOTIVES are now being mazda
strictly for use-all brass and ornamental
work being dispensed with. The result
iss reduction OF from 81, $50 to 81, 900 on
each locomotive.
HEY grow tail women on the Mis-
sissippi. A river poet writes thst he
kissed the clouds from her sweet fair
face" 1t seems almost incredible that
he could do any such thing.
| Most of US pass our lives in regrettiug
the past, complaining of the present,
and indulging in false hopes of the
uture, when it would be vastly better
to cut pole, dig some bait and go fish
ing.
| ELEVATOR Boy Ito a woman who has
ridden three times from bottom to top
OF the building)-" Well, where do YOU
want to get out?'' Woman-"WeIl, in
dade, Ohm not quote sure, but lave me
as near the Ould Colony depot as We
CAM hampton.
THERE are still too many men sitting
with their hats on in restaurants, too
many who will take Jumps of sugar with
their fingers when spoons in abundance
are lying around too many, in fact, who
ignore the existence of a butter-knife.
and, alas, yet too many who use their
own knife altogether too much.-TNew
York Graphic.
Who's that frizzly, black-bsired
woman, talking to my husband, on the
ottoman Y' "She's a Mrs. Cadogan
Smythe." Indee1l She's good at
fsttering people, should say; and
knows how to lay it on pretty thick 2"
" All, you infer that, no doubt, from Ler
attitude and expression ?" ooh, dear,
no! from my husbands l"-- Punch.
Mrs. A" Somebody's in the next
room. wonder what they're doing"
Looking wistfuIly st the keyhole.I
-" Eve good mind to peep" Mrs. B.
"Oh, | wouldn't; 'tisn't right" Mrs. A.
-" L don't care; Pm dying to know"
Puts eye to keyhole, but Immediately
takes it away, disconnected. "Hmi
the key is in" Mrs. B." Yes; so I
tound before you came in"
Soon the love-lorn maiden will HE to
the meadows, and pluck the dandelion
that has run to fluff, and, as she blows
the ''teathers" of, with murmur alter
nately. He loves me" and HE loves
me not" And the chances are one in
two that the oracle will decide as pleas
eth her best; but if it proves obstinate,
then she will say. " Surely, I counted not
correct" and will give herself another
Puck.
THE exploit Of good old Sir Roger
h.
Austria. That worthy baronet wagered
that between sunrise and sunset q coat
could be made for him out of the wool
from the back of sheep. They accord
ingly sheared the sheep at dawn, the
wool was dressed and dyed, woven into
cloth, cut and made to fit before night.
fall. An Austrian clothier has done all
this in eleven hours, SO that he really has
the Berkshire baronet, who
allowed himself from a. M. to 9 p. m.
! Whitehall Review.
THERE is a dog in New York whose
lines are cast in soft places. (And the
same could probably be said of the wits
Of mis- owner.) He is described by s
writer in the Chicago Tribune IS being
''of the black and-tan variety, and his
owner, rich and pretty woman, boards
at fashionable hotel. She pays full
board rates for the darling, and ne goes
TO the table with her and eats decorously
put of s sweet little gold dish. Csesm
and chicken is his avorite dishes, with
.idbits from his mistress plate. The
poor dear doggie-woggie has also god
very handsome and stylish
young avenue belle-and a birthday, and
when his birthday comes round-as it
lid last week--the happy event is cele-
)rated with a party-a sumptuous dog
)anquet-to which are invited all the
ryoOdles OF his acquaintance"