Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1879-08-01

Some quiet, lovely spot,
Some sweet secluded cot,
Ger which the vines do Green
Where they hoard fellow cheaps
Can any one describe ~ me
some cool, green island in the SEA,
Where can rcvcl On the deep,
Aud eat, and drink, and smoke and sleep,
Ana while the summer months away,
And have no hctci bill 20 paw
-CtRoisNaa C0mmspSal,
The girl who married her fathers
coachmsn took HIM for wheel and for
whoa.
4 pen may be driven, but the pencil
does best when it is lead. - Boston Tran
script,
Whirled without end-the waters OF
Niagara into Lake Ontario.-N0c York
Ne@.
The fellow made bad bull when he
went to steal y squash and got gourd =
Boston Transcript,
A Bridgeport man drew y revolver to
shoot cat and shot himself instead, to
the great grief OF the cat.--DuRbHrg
NeN.
When the time arrives for n baby To
commence eating bread you should
break it to him gently.--NsW Orleans
RodyWpe.
There's many man whose highest
ambition is to successfully contest n
seat on II nail key in n corner grocery
Indianapolis Sentinel
1t is said that it is better to improve
by other peoples errors than to find
fault with them; but oh! it's such fun
to find fault with them. -New Yort
MAJ.
If every ono who's played tho fool
Had died and turned to clay,
How many people would be len
Alive and well 10 davt
= SteubearHle Rtrdld.
The girls have new scheme of ilirt.
ing with their parasols. The boys re-
turn with their canes. Sometimes the
old gent takes hand in the game. He
tlirts with his boot, aurora News.
"Can you remember anything about
being bapt3edp' was asked of n 3year-
old girl. Il DIES tan ~ well, what
did tie minister do To you2" He
showed up my sleeve, and stuck knife
i'll my arm.
Mrs. Partington has been reading the
health officers weekly reports, and
thinks "total" must be an awful ma
lignant disease, since rs many die of it
rs all the rest put together.
A YOUNG lady being taken to task for
tight lacins, said she resoIted To the
practice on purely economical grounds.
Glow is thatW asked her reprover.
"Why," she replied, 81 lace tight sim
ply TO prevent waistfulness.
ONE day last week North Hill man
made wager that he could cat thirty
eggs in thirty minutes. He lost the
money. The first egg did the business
for him. 1t was no young, giddy, mex
perienced egg. II was venerable old
sage. and il did it with its little hatcht.
1'hunderstorms come to the just Ms
well as the unjust. They arise darkly
and dismally in the evening just ut n
time when man thinks Of taking his
girl out for ice cream, and when, there
fore, she cannot go.-New York Herald.
Before getting their hair cropped
short, people would do well To cut the
following paragraph out and paste it in
their hats: "rhe coolest ground in
summer is found under the tall grass
and not on the cropped lawn. Nea
York Commercial advertiser
In n little town in Missouri lady
teacher was exercising II class of juve-
niles in mental arithmetic. She com
menced the question. If you buy n
COW for SO" when up came little
hand. "What is it, Johny2" "Why,
YOU can't buy no kind of COW for $40.
Father sold one for $50 the other day,
and she was u regular old scrub nj
that"
A CORRESPONDENT wants to know II
wearing hat tends to mako n person
bald. We believe it does. Women
don't wear hats and they are not bald,
at least they do not wear them on their
heads, and so they are not bald there,
Hats destroy hair.--A woman's hat IL
worn on the back of her head, and that
is the reason why women have to buy
30 much back hair Danbury Neus.
1t doesn't take much ola mathemati-
clan to count flies: but, for fear that
some of our readers may not know what
a fly is, and how they are weighed, we
append the following table. Green
grocers will find il an excellent author
ity for weighing butter: One hundred
and sixty-two house flies, one ounce;
1852 house flies. one pound; 259,20C
house flies, one hundred-weight; 5,1a,'
600 house flies, one ton. The reader
may extract some consolation by past.
ing this on the bedroom wall and be
studying it at nIght.-Ne,U York Express.
Bear Hunting by Moonlight.