The sun., 1879-02-09
sHOULD WOMFN PROPOSEs
A few wccks ago a young country doc


few weeks ago young country doctor
gave us his love history IN a letter which we
were unable to treat with much respect In fact
II showed him to bc n rather conccitcd and self
conscious fellow. VINO WAS anxious TO let tho
world know what prize he would lc TO some
woman as husband. HE letter called out n
reply from sentimental maiden. who suhstnn-
TALLY offered herself to him as wife. saying
that she also had failed to meet with any ono on
whom she could set her affections. She was
severe in her structures on tho young men OF
the prcecnt.day. perhaps because Of their neg
lect OF her charms. but evidently wished THE
SUN to nssst her in getting husband, II busi-
neas we refused TO undertake. Maidens who
feel the nccd Of advertising for husbands are
not ant 10 be among the best specimens Of their
sex. We therefore replied to her letter by say
ing that the young men OF this day are M good
M tho young men Of any past day, but unless
they are very foolish they do not take for wives
young women who offer themselves to them.
This remark has stirred up several corre-
spondcnts to write TO US affirming woman's
right 10 make man proposal OF marriage
IL is inter esting to observe, however that all
these letters come from mon. that no woman
steps forward to claim the privilege OF offering
herself. though that many women do exercise
that privilege. II not by speaking out directly
nt lenht Dy KlNluE SlIbnE Minus VI AHtlA
monial desires, there is plenty OF proof.
maiden may not be so likely ne n widow to give
n hesitating man assistance in reaching the
point Of making a proposal. but probably few
girls nre altogether surprised when the mo-
mentous question Is asked them. and some of
them who turn out to be most exemplary wives
take much pains to pave the way to It. Even II
their own modesty aud cOyness prevent their
making the overturcs. their mothers may be less
shy about the matter, and see 70 1t that
the young men are given opportunities
to announce their intentions and encour-
aged or caioled into doing II. We all
have read or heard Of ambitious mammas
who made love 10 eligible bachelors on behalf
Of their daughters. using the cleverest strategy
to catch them. and sometimes resorting 70 de-
vices which were really reprehensiblc to nc
cOmplsh their purpose; but it Is a rare thing
for a maiden herself TO squarely court man
and directly offer herself to him. The woman.
as the philosophers say. may be the first 70 fall
in love, but she will only let the secret Of her
affection be extorted from her when the man
acknowledges that his own heart is captive and
asks her 10 confess the love sho has cherished.
but perhaps has sought assiduously to hide
from him. Good girls are very chary about
making the first advances in any such way as
to let men know what they are about and their
wish to be wooed and won. and refuse TO sur
render at the first summons.
Therefore II Is that many lovers who write
TO us are in torturing doubt rs TO whether they
have gained the affections they would so great
ly prize. They can only get relief by asking
the great question. though all the time their
sweethearts may he anxious to give it an affirm
ative answer That is the way with women.
and hcnce wc warned and again warn young
men. as rule. against women who offer them
selves to them. They lack feminine deicacy.
and do violence TO their natures by making such
aproposal; and in saying this we feel sure very
fow women readers of The SUN will disagree
with us. A woman has an undoubted right to
offer herself TO man: but the sex clains the
privilege OF being courted Of granting its af-
fectons instead of proffering them. and we al
low the claim. rs men have done from the days
of Eve up. and will always continue to do.
But friend in Virginia gives US instances
where maidcns have directly offered themselves
u mon. been accepted. and made good wives
The yoens men OF hi; day are a. good a. the
thsy do ne, take ior wives youns women who ocr tcu
A. frequent rsacr OF fnr sr> cann, let the para
eraph pass without more o notice than TIA aware oi it,
men 81 the pa.tani les ci the yonns men Of today Bai
tores ethical dictauon IN The quoted paragraph that
Why y mai young man i. foolish IN ln. age or wa.
who ofcr hcrscf To him indeci Why - a mai, Al
Vie Que %o 4opSed to- To- Gn Hi ''' ne elects '0T MS
woman o @ !ss s Pos rsc. o oSy S on 1T part n ct III.
se As 'or Hi 'r l'' not 2 he permitted 70 exercise
Of Nmcsseei who we're IN ros~c >sion OF mint, uf money
thsiis onsr trmseves 70 The men 10 bon tbrv w,r
maiurd and o. whom they hore children. and 10 whem
common Very many other similar instances could 6c
inund m hcse states but nickel a. good as an kngl-
!, is s.lg.' TO 90 INTO details Nr " was alawyer
fHaf4r dina
mined e wa. AZ country toNu AZ tail l,nsrl o.
speed, sau'ed him AMI a-kcd, ''Whai are you doins
neiHl ""n !on know uht You're expected ~ f H.
lit io.- horc. met the appointment mus made fy The
n;,.l s,s',ai g9uenee ~ anl aboat wtTc he h,rd
pgorri,p q their Wedding, which wa, soon an accom-
pli,h.J iact llc died recruuy. having exrri-cd n
hr"ir,nh influence on N" entire western division
Wa. Wis enoush To- make her ,as o%n .sleel,5n 9Sr,
an .'c Indications 81 positive character 10 the man
o,, Ice .lanisLcsd snd .hou.icrs taller dian lee wcut
cdr"r Of tbs srx lie has ns,lr sani hn.hsni ~ ,,s @
Eo"n 5 T,,s director 9i mGnGlA} researee Close
assn1F, & 10 as Wis in ,oms prudent IN admin.irauo
The World eocs. At home AMI abroad. amt thoash he
would hsve proven himself success under any eircum
much mew foolish thing than to wed a woman Who
mrk"s ie him ile prepo'uon
fss s@, goT, cay w1 c Instance: y hem stated be
Tenn aHi to Ncnphi. Tenn To - virginia Nashville
lhcy ar not cuos ioc.tanh. the incorrcctness o
ol instances such as I've written down here.
The instances given by our correspondent.
and the others be Processes 10 be able to fur
nsh, may be authentic. but we continue to adj
visc maidcns not to 90 courtng after the fash.
ion he commends. We do not however need
10 urge tho advice ON them. They do not bo.
licTc In that way Of getting husbands, and they
are not likely TO adopt it,