Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1879-10-30
The Sturp Teller.
PARSON JOHN BULLEN'S LIZARDS.
AIT (ss) DULLARs REWARD.

FAkSUN JUhN buLLcN'S AiAAnDo
AIT (ss) DULLARs REWARD.
,rEssHuN BELIEVERS 4Np KoNsTABLEs! KETcE
I'M KETCH I'M!
THIS kash will be pade in korn, ur uther pro
JUICE, tn be kolected at ur about mex camp,meetin
ur thararter, by eny wun what ketches him, ful
the karkus owe sartin wun SUIT LoVINGooD
dead ur alive ur ailin an safely Civ over til the
purtectin care owe Parson John Bullin, ur lef
we'll tied, at Squire Mackjunkins, fur the raisir
owe the devil pussonely. an permiskusly discum
furtin the wimen very powerful. an skeerin owe
folks generly heap, an Dustin up Promisln
big warm meetin, an . maxim the wickid larf
an wus. an wus, insultin owe the passun oSfni.
Test JEHU WETHERo.
Sined by me,
JOHN BULLEN, the passun.
I found written copies of the above highly
intellieible and yindictive proclamation. stuck
up on every blacksmith shop, doggery and
store in the Frog Mountain Range. Its blood
thirsty spirit its style, and, above all its CHI
Biography, interested me to the extent of taking
one down from tree for preservation.
In few days fouad Sut in a good crowd
in front of Capehart's Doggery, and as he
seemed to be about in good tune, read it to
him.
"Yas, George, that ar dockymint am in ded
yearnist sartin. Them hard shells over thar
dus want me the wus kline, powerful bad. But
spect ait dullers won't fetch me, nither wud
ait hundred, bekase thar's nun owe 'em fas'
enuf tn ketch me, nither is thar hosses, by the
living jingo! Say, George, much talk bout
this fuss up whar yu're been p For the sake
of joke, said yes, great deal.
"Jis' as I 'spected, durn 'em, all git drunk,
an skeer thar fool SETS nj ontu deth, an then
Law hit ontu me, poor, innersent youf, an es
SCUM believer es they is. Lite, lite, ole Teller
an let that roam owe yourn blow it'll, an
I'll 'splain this cussed misfortnit affair hit hes
ruinated my karacter es Plus pusson IN the
s'ciety roun' yere, an is spreadin' faster nur
meazils. When ever yu hear any on em
J spreadin' hit, gin .st the dam lie squsr, will
yu? haint dun muffin tu one owe 'em. Hits
true I did sorter frustrate few Lizards a
littil, but they haint members, es knows on.
"You see, las year went tn the big meet
in at Rattlesnake Springs. an wer sittln in
nice shady place wifi a frien' owe mine. DUN
muffin tn nobody an maxim no fuss, when, the
fuss thing I remembers, | woke up from
trance what he'd been knocked inter by a
four year old hickory stick, hilt in the paw
owe ole Passun Bullin, durn his alligatur hide
an he wur a stapdin a striddil owe me, a
foamin at the mouf, chompin his teeth-ges-
term wifi the hickory cuban preachin tu
me so you cud hearn him mile, about
sartin sins ginerally, an my wickedness pus:
senelly, an mensunn the name owe my frien
loud enuf tu be hearn tu the meetin 'ous. My
poor innersent frien' wer dun gone, an l wer
glad owe hit, fur tho't he meut tn kill me
rite whar lay, an didn't want her .tu see
me die"
"Who was she, the friend you speak Of
Sut2" Sut opened his eyes wide.
"Hu the devil an darnashun tole yu that hit
wer she?"
."Why, you did, Sut"-
II didn't, durn eff I did. Ole Bullin dun
hit, an I'll hev to kill him, yet, the cussed,
Internal ole talebarer "-
"Well, well, SUIT, who was she 2"
"Nun owe y,u re DISMISS, durn yure littil
ankshus picter! I sees yu lickin owe yure
lips. I I.OiA tell you one thing, George; that
night, neighbor gal got ALFRED, overhan-
did stroppin from her nam, VITA stirrup leath-
er, an ole Passun Bullin, he'd ct supper thar,
an what's wus nur all, that poor, innersent,
skeered gal had dun her levil bes' cookin
hit for i'm. She begged him, trimlin, an a
cryip, not tu tell on her. He ct her cookin,
he promised her he'd keep dark-an' then
went straight an tole her nam. Warn't that
rale low down, wolf mean? The durn'd in
furnel, hiperkritikal, pot-bellied, scaly hided.
whisky.wastin, stinkin ole groun'hog. He'd
a heap better stole sum mans hoss I'D a
thot more owe i'm. But paid him plum up
fur hit, an means tu keep payin him, ontil
one or luther owe our toes pints up tn the
roots owe the grass.
"Well, yere's the way lifted that note owe
han. At the mex big meetin at Rattilsnaik-
las week hit wer-I wer on han as solemn as
a ole hat kivver on collection day. he'd my
face draw'd out intu the shape an perporshun
owe taylwer's sleeve-board, pint down. l
he'd put on the convicted sinner so perteckly
that an ole obsarvin she pillar owe the church
sed tu ole he pillar, es walked up to my
bainch:
"Law sakes alive eff thar amt that orfu
sinner, sut Lovingood, pearced plum thru
hu's next?
"Yu see, by golly, George, he'd tu promi<
the ole tub owe soap. greas tu cum an hev my
self convarted, jis' tu keep him frum KILN
me. An es I know'd hit wudn't lnterfarf
wifi the felashun I bore to the still housl'
roun' thar, didn't keer durn. jis' want
ed tu git nj ole Bullin, onst onsuspected, an
this wer the best way tu du hit. l TUX sea
on the side steps owe the pulpit, an kivveree
es much owe my straitch'd face es l could wi
my hands, tu prove wer in yearnis. III
tuck powerful-fur l hearn sorter thankful
kline owe buzzin all over the congregashun
Ole Bullin hissef looked down at me, Owe
his ole copper specks, an hit sed jis' es plalr
es look cud say hit: 'Yu am thar, are yu-
durn yu, hits we'll fur yu that yu cum !!
tho't sorter different frum that tho't hi
wud been we'll fur yu, eff hadn't cum
but I didn't say hit jis then. Thar wur
monstrus crowd in that grove, fur the weathe
wer fine, an blevers were plenty roun' abou
Rattilsnaik Springs. Ole Bullin gin out, an
they sung that hyme, yu know:
sThsr will be mournin yere, an mournin thar
On that dreadful day tn cum"
thinks I, ole hoss, kin hit be possibil eny
body hes tole yu what's gwine tu happiin
an then thot that nobody know'd hit bu
me, an wer cumforted. He mex tuck his
self tex pow'Ay mixed wifi birthstone an
..--,J 80 h1,o Aonoo, an then he ODened