The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1879-05-21

.-.H
The merry, merry fifteen cent cigar.
P. Sit was the reporter that got the puff.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
ITEMS OF INTEREST.
The rod is often used in a school o
fish. ,,....
Chinese never eat oysters in their fresh
state. '''
There is nothing quite SO shocking as
an earthquake. 1-27..,@i '''''. ~ ~
The train that beats electricity-The
rain of thought. r .ii1trGI sN.E
There are 1876 tribes Of Indians left Ia
the United States. Bta!aS;9ik
Draughts which are never cashed :
Those Of drunkard. -.fE,e'
Oats that will grow in winter as thrifty
as in mer.-Wild oats. g.,
The tax on amorial bearings in Eng
land realizes S5O0,0O0 annually.
Exclusive of Cuba and Porto Rico,
Spain has a population of IL, SOC, 600.
If you wish to know how to compose
yourself, learn the art of type-setting.
:, Love levels all ranks, but you can't
love an onion enough to level its rank.
The axe was an ancient weapon used
in the most remote periods IN warfare.
The fullcapacity of the lungs is about
three hundred and twenty cubic inches.
In sitting for picture the person who
winkstat the camera gets a reply In the
negative.
There are more than five hundred
separate nerves and blood vessels IN the
human body. .'a...sir5s,
II fear that you do not quite appre-
hend me-" as the jail-bird said to his
baffled pursuers. ,sJ..y - =,
A carpenter at Buenos Ayres gets sixty,
dollars day; but then, cotton cloth Is
fifteen dollars yard.
George (insinuatingly Polly, will
YOU give me that orange? Polly lmag-
nanimously)-Oh, yes, George! but you
must wait till I've sucked it. @g
"Will village COW pay" asks an
AGRICULTURAL exchange, We can't cay IS
to their paying anything themselves,
but we have often seen them dun.
Michigan University boasts l,342 stu
dents, while Harvard has 1882. Har.
ward leads, however, in the number OF
instructors, having l34 to Michigan SIX
ty-three. -.
"seth Spicern affirns that if a man
blows his nose in public nowadays he is
likely, within twenty-four hours, to re-
ceive two dozen sure cures for catarrh.-
N. Y. NeaUs. r'"'.&
We all ov US areapt to pirate about our
Independence of character, and yet the
notis of crate man efekts most folks,
just as a pat on the he'd duz puppy.
Josh Billings t..,....,
The laws of. Germany are stern. For
speaking disrespectfully Of the Crown
Prince in a public place of entertain
ment, a teacher of languages has been
sentenced to four months imprisonment
It is when our budding hopes are
nipped beyond recovery by some rough
wind that we are the most disposed to
picture to ourselves what flowers they
might have borne if they had hourished.
The Rome Sentinel asserts that the
healthy Indian Is well red man. It
YOU were to see him licking molasses out
of the bottom of a government bucket,
you'd think he was pail-faced man.
OttaaOa Republican. .,...
"Papa, what made you 60 to the war?"
Said Jennie, climbing on my chair.
'"You might have had two fingers more
To twine amid my flowing hair"
"Why, dear, they drafted your brave pa,
And lost these fingers on q saw"
Cincinnati Star.
The amount of capital employed in
cotton manufacture in the United States
in 1860 was $685. 900, yielding return
of eight per cent; in 1870, Sl4l,Ooo,ooo,
yielding 2 return of seven per cent. IN
1873, estimated at S208, ,0OO, COO, yielding
five per cent. return.
Perhaps the funniest object is the man
who spends his first day in newspaper
office. He tries to appear as if he had
been in a newspaper office all his life,
but somehow he doesn't seem to feel
easy. There seem to be too many bones
in his shad.-New York Herald.
God bless the farm, the dear old farm,
God bless it every rood,
Where willing hearts and sturdy arms
. Can earn an honest livelihood,
And from the coarse and fertile soil Pr.
Win back recompense from toll.
The peanut crop this year is estimated
at I,200, 900 bushels. Will some -une of
our readers, who is good at mathematics,
estimate for us how long it would take
the young men of this country to exhaust
this crop if they were to carry a,pint Of
peanuts in their pockets every time they
went to see their girls?-Norrtstoacn
Herald.
Prof. BENJAMIN Pierce, of Harvard Col
lege, says the whole number of comets
which are capable of being seen from the
earth, and which are contained in our
suns sphere, may be fairly estimated at
over 5000, 900, 900. Considering the hard
ness OF the times we should say that the
SUMS sphere was pretty well fixed, as re-
CARDS comets.
A gentleman who has spent some days
in the region Of the coal-oil wells, IN
Pennsylvania, says that in his opinion
the government ought to interfere Mt
once. and put stop to further pumping
and boring for OIL. He is quite certain
the oil is being drawn through these
wells from the bearing of the earth S
axis, and that the eart.l will cease to turn
when the fabrication ceases.
A Cincinnati merchant writes to the
Enquirer to complain of loafers who
c0ngregatc in front Of his store. by
their loud and ungentlemanly talk, lie
says, "they offend ladies who come to
examine my immense stock of caicoes
and ginghams just received from the
Eastern markets, which am selling at
prices that defy compelition:" The ed
itor was cruel enough to omit the name
and address.
To lind out whether Il garden has been
plantpd or not, IN exchange gives the
following rule: If one forgets whether
beds are planted or not, a way to tell Is
to turn Il stray eat into the garden. II
the beds are planted. the catwill proceed
to race round and dig into them and act
as if it had relatives in China it was anx-
ious to get at, while. if they are not, it
will sit down calmly in the path and
seem to be meditating on the progress, OF
missionary work in Africa. A eats in
| st;pot coIIo,o decpivas in this MATTER"