Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1879-06-14
THU SCIENrISr'S D4UaHrER.
The DangerD OF Affection and the
Horrors of MalrimOnY.


MY Dear Daughter: 1t is how some months
SINCE wrote you q letter OF advice, but believe
me, the delay has not been because did q d
Know tnat you needed instruction for like aost.
OSner Young people you require little else Sc ,ay
that society imposes upon parents the duty o.
Clothing and feeding their offspring. Nomatter
70 T n strai 5; man may be reduced mat
and necessary stimulants, society looks uDon
him as worthless If he fails to provide for his
fam family a1d to satisfy their fictitious
Mte, your mother had long ere now been Sc. t
like Hagar into the wilderness to take pot-IucS
WIZ, wild tne raven and the crows; aud 1ubt lot
Cnat nao sne been equally free to lead her IDEAL
s .stence sne would have abandoned you aud
tne resi- OF my Ishmaeis to the buzzard and the
, a. peiore sunset of the day on which she set
ou. 0n ner Wanderfngs. Society is based on the
.luei Doctrine that what a man loved In his
youtn tnat he must pretend to love when adj
e eaacag years have mellowed hts understanding
ana Widened his views until he sees that all that
ne nad De1eVed to be peculiar in the wife of his
yOuCn Is put commonplace and shared with a
o on1usanG and one other women more beautiful
lake MN many years to learn that intelligence
anu ueauty are not OF great Importance and ar,
noI peIpetually attractive; he reaches state
supp eue apathy-the state which Emerson
Ioles naooWed when he spoke Of how love of a
particular person at last becomes benevolence
n nySf as al mankind."the Individual as Ten
hJss says, meaning the other Individual,
"Whhers. and the wo Id is more and more"
buS tne Grutn Is, rather, that In this supreme
a! Amy the world withers along with the IL
sragai ~ Meantime family has grown up
ent as he Is to the families of other. the nnlv
essential difference being that he can recognize
~ races rather more readily at distance or
and since he has become Infatuated TO the care
OF MS vile and children the pang of spending
MS money upon them Is somewhat lessened.
unhappy man is commonly so fndurated that
ne hardly notices it. Ihave asked men whose
damiiles nave been wholly removed in railway
the AFFAIR, and though they acknowledged
that at first they were startled and panied. vet
when they turned the matter over with them.
their first sensation was really and at bottom
like that delight which is said to thrill men at
Inc moment OF their release from the rack.
they were at liberty to live the lives they would
have chosen had the accidents never occurred
and to enjoy as otherwise they never could have
fe enc, S, Mr. Iennysons I'm Memoriam." the
publications on mortuary topics. They were
therefore gratifed, though to the commonplace
world they seemed merely resigned. WISH you
10 get an 1nkllng OF these things before 1t shall
be too late and the irretrievable mischief is
zone, Ior, as nave observed women, the case
with them Is not essentially different from what
1t Is with men. Still, 1 hardly know why 1
Write thus to you, since by so doing must seem
IN some degree to cOnfute my own principles:
put, surely, my Child, you should see that If L
..oN ohJ LCoA PiAAClpiCO HUI p0 truly ana.
thetic. But put it on what grounds you choose,
1t Is enough that to write this letter Jumps with
my humor, and care quite as much for you as
fer my time; brain power must be expended in
some way, and why not in this?
II my memory serves me you are now about
SIX years OLD and before long you will be falling
own sake, and through your sake for that of the
man you Will love, cannot shut my eyes to the
fact that you win So fall in love "a keen phrase
that and one showing that love is below you, for
lrfnrp iv,fn
your clear, gray eyes, bright with light rather
than color have sometimes hoped that you
would I escape this common fate; that your intel
lect would rise about It, for your intellect both
Dy inheritance and original motion should sur
pass that OF the herd. But, alas, the melan-
cnoiy TACT remains that with love the intellect
mas naught to do; l should say that 1T has its
origin and realm in the moral nature, In the
great sympathetic nervous system of the nom
might be termed its cerebro- spinal nervous sys-
tem In general 1t may be said that nothing but
apathy can prevent or cure the perniciOus affec-
Ton called love; bu: there are instances in which
early training on the moral side has been as
enectual as on the Intellectual side it was, for
example, In the case of the late John Stuart
MIL BY persistent course Of nagging might
make you so hateful that nobody would love
you. and so nasty-tempered and cross-grained
that you could never love man, woman or child
But think for moment what trouble and an
nOyance this would cause me. / have tried It,
repeatedly, but when l saw it was disturbing
my apathy at once stopped it. You may re-,
MEMBER at meals have cried out, dorothy,
can't you sit properly In your chaIr?n or There
goes your fork again; II it drops on the floor
anotner single time you shall go right off TO
b Seo,n ana the IKE. You were In fine way to
wish you were, seeing that am away from
home most Of the time. but even for your sake
could not persist tn this method Of training
luoiclous ana Tor your own good though 1t was
l found out soon that was really beginning to
mean Wnat said and feel angry with you.
e eng Sest 70 yog my must remain
mined to write to you as a sensible being on an
equal footing with myself. l will therefore give
you the best advice at my command as to how
ess OF love, and my dear, no one could have a
better opportunity to discover it than is yours,
because OF your young and tender years. Look
many playmates whom you visit at their homes:
their parents seem to the outer world the most
loving Of people and most willing to make sac
child they will not be over-circumspect when
you are near apparently playing with their
daughters. Now mark how sarcastic they are
to each other; how snappish the husband is
me under sit1ilar circumstances. See how the
wife slyly hides the newspaper. andlhow for no
oetter reason than that the father slams the
door. Pry into all their secrets; listen under
the windows and you will see what love results
In. Then come and tell me all about it that
may DE fortified In my opinions and write them
OUt Al cal WOTk WHICH i snail dedicate to
you, and which you may read with 10y when
you are happy-or at least apaJhetic-o!d
spiLster, and ''hic.-jacet" shall be Inscribed
upon my tombstone.-fN. Y. World.
The Old Pesstmists.
Although the national religion OF the Hebrews
was Optismftic In high degree, there is q
strongly pessimistic strain In sucn Scriptures
as tie BOOK OF JOB and EccleSiastes Job may
De pronounced the first peSsimists when he
cursed the DAY OF his birth. "Let the day perish
wherein was born, and the night in which
was sald, Inere Is man Child conceived"
Man mat is born of woman is of few days
ana Iull OF trouble" The words OF the preacher
In Ecciesiastes are deeply tinged with pessi-
mlsm. Lie Is "hateful," and all That Is wrought
under the sun only t'vantty and vexation OF
spirit" But the lights Of vivid and joyful life
also shine forth from the darkened background
drawn by the preachers pencil; and the gener-
al strain OF the Hebrew literature, it must be
admitted, is highly OpttmiSt. "The earth Is full
of the goodness OF the Lord. Let the heavens
rejoice and let the earth be glad" In Greek
and Roman antiquity there Is at times deep
vein OF pesSimtsm, especially in the Greek
drama and the later Roman literature HesiOd
says: 1.-The land and the sea are full OF
evils" Even Homer with all his bright
heartedness, can say: "There Is nothing
whatever more wretched than man." The
very voice OF Buddhism seems tos speak In
TheOgnis before it was heard 10 the st reefs OF
BenaTes, "1t would be better for the children OF
the earth Lot to be born. next best for
them, when born, to pass the gates of Hades as
soon as possible The same voice is heard