Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1879-07-04
Josh Billings Philosophy.

Josh Billings Philosophy.
The man who gifts bit twice hi the
same dog il better adapted to that kind
ov dizziness than any other.
Old things are the best-old wine, Old
shoes, and old cheeze, for instansc-
and will add to theze (beg pardon)
old phellows.
Adversely il the only thing that kan
show us the true from the false pros.
perity makes them both look alike.
The ordinary brain succumbs to
whiskey. but real genious kant be
smothered hi whiskey it may be de-
stroyed. but gives up the ghost in the
glare of q bonfire.
Mi earnest prayer il, and hope al
ways will be, save me from ingratltude
and hipokrasy.
The very best possible condishun
that 8 tenths ov the world kan be placed
in il to hav plenty to eat and plenty to
do.
A man ov mere talent il phool to
work for fame, he should git hiz pay in
money az he goes along the man ov
genius kan name hiz price in glory, and
oblige futurity to settle with him.
Man il a kurious kritter, nothing will
discourage and disgust him more than
to Civ him all he asks for.
What IL worth doing at all liz, no
doubt, worth doing we'll, but hav seen
lots ov things spite hi trieing to do
them too mulch.
The man who don't kno how to do a
thing himself, and won't learn from
others, makes himself phool without
remidy.
Truth IL like the sun, tho it sinks out
ov sight, it allwuss rizes agin with nu
splendor.
Gratitude liz ov the noblest, and also
one ov the rarerest pashuns or senti-
ments ov the heart.
If thare liz such thing az good LUX,
the phools in this world git the largest
share ov it,
Poverty IL no kure for extravaganza /;
a pauper had rather hav one feast than
3 square meals.
Frugality and industry makes a ma
ton ; incidence and luxury ruins it.
Envy and superstishun are ever the
companyuns ov ignoranse.
Cunning begins by cheating others,
and alwuss ends by cheating itself.
Crate welth liz CRATE kurse it makes
more trubble than happiness for us
while here, and if we could take it with
us when we die, it would often be the
worst witness we could have at the
judgement seat.
Charity, whoze author liz unknown,
IL like mama from heaven.
The multitude praze those who are at
the top ov the ladder, without asking
how they got there.
Uncivilized people are all alike ; their
pashuns are alike, they even all look
alike.
First impreshuns are alwuss the
strongest, but not alwuss the truest.
The best judges ov karakter are thoze
who take every man to be honest until
they kan prove him guilty.
Enuff liz happiness, but we have no
standard to meazure the quantity.
I am not certain whether the good or
evil man duz unintentionally kounts
or not, but they may Offset each other ;
who kan tell ?
All that kno about good LUX or bad
LUX liz this-our good LUX we attribute
to our shrewdness, our bad lux we
charge over to sumboddy's else ackount.
The man who il anxious on all &C.
kashums to tell all he knows, il pretty
sure not to know all he tells.
The only real safe advice to follow IL
that kind which strengthens our own
opinyuns.
If yu lend money to spendthrift, the
chances are that yu will loze the prin-
cipal, and git nothing but abuse for the
interest.
He who learns hi the experience ov
others. and never let's others learn by
hiz, IL just about az shrewd az men ever
git to be in this world.
Horses are ticklish property; I
should az soon think ov picking out a
sound deukon hi looking at him, az a
sound horse-yu have got to take them
both on trial, and pray for good lux be-
sides.
We all pray for long life, but short
one liz the safest.
The man whom prosperity makes
proud. adversely will make insolent.
Every one expekts to be remembered
after they are dead, but very few kan
truly tell for what.
Flattery IL an evidence ov craven
spirit we never fatter thoze whom we
respekt.
Yung man, watch yure opportunity,
and, when yu see it, lay violent hands
on it it liz sure to cum once, and may
not cum the seckond time.
allwuss notiss that thoze yung VIM
min who are afrade that every yung fell
low who Gums near them il going to
steal them, and run away with them,
and brake their PARENTS harte, seldum
suckceed in Citing kaught.
THOUGHTS ON BREEDING HORSES
We often hear it said that it does not
pay for farmers to raise this or that
breed of horses, but this is true only
in limited sense. The best always
pays. The best specimens of any strain