The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1879-11-18
,Seuse aud eNoqse,tse.
The great senses taker-Rum.

rSti(SS fuUt Jutt0t1tAc'
The great senses taker-Rum
Made to order-slaves.-Pu
Liable to drop.sickle trouble-Rea-
pers.
As the switch is bent the youths in
clines.
The Home of the C@sars-The Gus
tom House.
The miser is the great original chest
protector.
The outlook in Washington-the OBJ
servatory.
To ask a man to pay bill is as easily
said as dun. q
There is change in everything but an
editors pocket.
Love never dyes, but it will sometimes
get bald headed.
The oarsmen have sculled the last
rows of summer.
The wounded heart heals, but the
scar remains forever.
Charity begins at home, and ends in
foreign mission society.
People who give tone to society rare.
ly give anything else.
Speaking of nautical terms, was
Noah's wife bis frs mate2
/ They who have true light IN them
selves seldom become satellites.
/ The smallest perfect achievement is
nobler than the grandest failure.
Some men cannot rest in any position
90 we'll as when leaning on bar.
The railroads are bringing in great
quantities Of game-especially euchre.
Love thy neighbor as thy self, for
they are handy to borrow sour milk OF.
1t is malicious woman who will sly.
ly put long hairs on mans coat just to
make bis wife jealous.
"You speak foolishly," said ore to
another. The other retorted: ut is that
you may understand me-"
At long range 1t is pretty hard to tell
whether man is playing harmonica
or gnawing an ear OF green corn.
1 We have invented new gun for the
|didn't-know-it-w was-loaded people. 1t
lets the charge out at the breech.
| A man is always wanting some one to
tell him how handsome he looks. A
wenan will just stand before glase and
see for herself.
Eat oysters only in the months that
have an "r" in their names, and drink
whisky only in the months that have
"k" in their names.
/ Martin F. Tuprer asks, "Where are
the pure, the noble and the meek ?"
Don't know where they are in England,
but in this country they are running for
Office.
i William Augustus to sleepy room
mate Come, John Henry, why don't
you get up with the lark as l do ? John
Henry, grimly; Been up with him oil
night.
Professor-"Now, ask you, as q
practical miner, what spade do you think
is the very best ?" Third-year man
(scornfully)-"Why, the ace, of course.
(Sensalion.
i 1t is now that the dentist smiles from
ear to ear and looks like the aurora
borealis on stills as he observes the fes-
tive young lady cracking hickory nuts
with her 'front.' teeth.
A carpet dealer in Burlington adver
tises "new Brussels carpets that cant be
beat" That's the kind We want at our
house. Send US half dozen you may
keep the change:-Ha,okeys
j Dom Piatt missed it on his last play,
but he has given the great enemy OF
Christianity, Bob Ingersoll, name
which will stick to him like pine tree
gum. He calls him Bob Injuresoul.
i The Philadelphia Ledger informs an
''anxious inquirer" that .poets are born.
not made" We regret to learn this, for
we had intended to take block Of wood
and penkniie and whittle out few for
the fall trade.
Arabella ION her toes in chair clutch
ing eonvulsively at her skirts 10,
Bridget! a mouse! mouse! Come and
catch it, quick!" Bridget-"Sure, mum.
there's no hurry: II this one gets away,
can catch plenty more for yer, mum. F"
A great purple spot was lately dis
, covered on the face of Jupiter, and the
scientific question of the day is, What's
the matter with Jupe? After thor
ough investigation of the matter, and
, the making Of many comparst obser-
vations, we conclude that Jupiter told
Mars he was liar.
} A gentleman while travelling in Free
, dom, N. H., noticed the following sign,
, which, in vulgar parlance, "knocked
3 him." He studied it ten minutes be.
+ fore he mastered it, and then copied II
! for The benefit OF the Journal readers:
Tv ErZ SOT AND OTHEr EyE'NIN
DUN R, TIE HEAT CAwL.
The donkey is pretty bird,
So gentle and so wise;
I It has silky little tail
With which to frisk the flies.
a Upon its head two ears it bears,
So silky, long and soft.
; That when the tail can't reach the Aies,
The ears can whisk them Of
An amusing reply was given by a
girl, while at London ballroom. Her
mother subsequently, discovered her in q
remote nook with Q gentleman, who
had bis arms around her waist, while
, she rested the tips of her pretty little
, fingers on his manly shoulder.
a "My dear, what's all this T., exclaimed
/, the irate mamma.
"Mamma, allow me to introduce Cap,
tain X, to you. / had promised him &
dance. but was so tired that / couldn'
. keep my word, and I'm just giving hin
4 q sitting-still waltz instead.
9 The Burlington Hawkeye says tha
It the patent almanacs. mortised for th'
publishers name, have already begur
to pour down for 1880, and that the de
signs are new aud very different from
those OF last year. The picture OF th'
: boy skating in bis hare feet, with on,
- little brother on his back and six NOR,
!, on bis sled, being put on the Januar.
!, instead OF on the December page, ant
- then the picture OF, Christmas Eve come
r n n =.