Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1879-11-22
Editorial Breyiiics.

An editor who seems 10 nave Ueeu
investigating the matter says the young
woman who doesen't scream when
candle bug crawls down her back is she
who later in life, can spank baby TILL
it thinks the day Of judgment has arrlv-
ed, then 90 smiling to the parlor and re
ceive her friends with an easy grace
that is as soothing as dose of NOR
phine.
Some people seem to think that when
Gabriel plays that cornet solo 1t viii
take a pretty loud blast to call Mr.. lie
Moyne into the front ranks. And this
is apparently about the only objection n
to cremation. We notice in recent
foreign dispatch that the municipality OF
Berlin is not affected by the above, and
has officially recommended cremation
on both sanitary and economic grounds.
Last Friday, in accordance with an
act of Congress, the birth place Of Wash
iugton was marked with slab prepara-
tory TO the erection of monument
thereat. Congress can not be accused
of extravaganza in this matter. 1t Is
not a harmful and will not prove an ex-
pensive precedent to erect monument
to the memory of 4 man who never told
q lie
We see il stated by our Pennsy lyania
exchanges that twenty-five thousand
quail are being imported from England
TO be set at liberty in that State. This
will be good news for our sportsmen, as
well as those of Pennsylvania, as these
quail will no doubt migrate across the
Potomac.
Advice TO parents Whenever you
90 to church take your baby. If there
is any one thing baby appreciates
more than another, il is a sermon. "A
pew seems TO inspire it with more con-
fdence in its crying abilities than era
die. a baby is some times n great re-
lief 10 a sermon; lends it background,
variety, fancy.
The widow OF James Fisk, Jr., boards
at South Deerfeld, Mass, with couple
who formerly were her coachman and
cook. This is not from economical mo
tiyes, however, for she has handsome
competency.
An honest Hibernian, in recommend
ing COW, said she would give milk
year after year without having calves.
because" said be, "it runs in the
braIe, Tor she came Of COW that never
had a calf
A Milwaukee girl, suffering from
lockiaw, was left alone with mouse by
the shrewd physician, and she contriyed
to open her mouth enough to give
veil that made the crockery in the china
closet rattle.
A writer truly says that there is no
need to 20 beyond the farm yards and
stables 10 estimate the condition OF the
farm, OF to judge OF the success OF the
owner.
a woman is playing torcbIigbt pro-
cession with a lantern at Grand Rapids,
Mich. She walks the streets at night
declaring that she is the bride OF heaven.
Cornstalks and leaves are more nutri-
tious if cut green. Much is lost II the
shocks are permitted to remain until late
in the year.
Pennsylvania has eighty incorporated
county agricultural societies, ;hirty-one
OF which have representation in It's State
Board of Agriculture.
A great many men are so anxiously
advocating the payment Of the national
debt that they forget all about those
contracted by themselves.
81 have a love letter." said the serv-
ant girl to her mistress. "Will ye rsde
it to INT? And here's some Gotten, ,wud
ye stuff in yer years whole ye rade III
A little boy was asked if he had a
good memory. "No," said he; ''but /
have good forgetency."
The time is coming when a buffalo
robe will cover two hearts that beat as
one.
'Tm engaged for this SCI" said the
hen TO the rooster as she went clucking
Away.