Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1879-04-26
VIRGINIA FREE RESS-THE OLD f
The Ola Family Journal.
VARIETY.


\ will goose thinks cnli weather Is fytiuc
Does an intellectual savage have mental
reservation
Dried apples are used for desert at all swell
parties
No one eeer tnui fault with a musie-box
fOT putting on airs.
We are bull-iozing Oh Eoglaud Oi,h the
besi Of young Texts
Hyre-aveona man calls his horse Fa-
v0r' because De curric o.
4 pair Of ears that <, on a head of civiliza-
tioa-pioueers ana irouucrs.
Sta,isticaus affirm that COMMITTEES raising tue
mtsj onions have the fcwcst marriages.
A lady. describing an ill-nsturel man, says
he never smiles but DE feels ashamed ui %.
Woman's sphere; that she Uil never get
married
Itisa French saving that socner or later
we pardon oar cuemics all the iujuiies wc Lave
done them.
Very kipd gent " DO you know. my Dear
that we have to-day the shortest day ia the
year?' Lady. every true, But your pres
euce makes ne forget itV
The generous Young fellow was >anenln
surprised when te asked bis leait's piol ID >te
could Just swing cn al the iewelry she e r,d,
what Sind would SIZE prefer, aud she av,N.
Ell, "a gate
A Chicaso woman is going Oh 'ry u s..r
i,r mouth shot tree ttou,ani quaf,,-
II this Dew departure should BIC me sp 'epr
shat a mighty n.1-e would -e,,.e down ui .e
ta's troubled .tHl
LAZY Llrs- si Nme d cz. OBJ v'r On.
the late G-l.. p.ia.ster no Ci,~ft. ra.r ...
GRO tte a., r.r.ats W I. --e.s llr tugt
ssh star ,te Ori,r % Meri tr Moe
The decorst.- .azc- with diamonds
A vouns nsu went into "a a,li,;'s store The
Otlcr dav t1 .uy a rosebud ts his atilncDd
Scvcuty-6ee cents was the price asked "WiN
IL keepl inquired ihe young NAN. o.,
yes; a long while. "Then you may aeep %. -
The pedestrian ever has even extended to
tie most secluded precincts Of The family clcle
We hear 90 several young ladies 90 h,glly
respectable parents la this city who are traiu-
ing % walk, and nearly all of them are under
two wears Of age
The Baltimore Ec1y Saturday says a capt.
tAlist may get up corner on grain. but "there
Is no way uf getting corner on pretty girls.
Perhaps nj; bat there Is a wl7 of getting
pretty cir iutoa corner, after the o. folks have
retired and tle eas iuIu,d down. tLst makes
young mau forget al the corners iu tte
world.
e Dearest. let as in this cafe refresh ourselves
~ a brief period. said q swell Young man o.
spituel,e creature dressed n lle height oi
fashion. ~Whatli you havc said the wait
~, handing the lady the bi.i Of fare On.
never mind the bi.l oi fare she replied -
"Give me q plate of cod d>h cakes. Nith p.eut g,
90 butter" Toe youus mlu hiutei.
Father. sail a wishful lass about sixteen
years of age. IL know something about srau-
mar. but caano, decline m,trim'oy, DOR see
the reason why Gilbert ADD myself cannot De-
coniugaiei
There is nothing more wonderful than tile
effect of vanity ou the human mind We hear
of young lady who WAS presented with halt
@ dozen costly uight-gowls, deliberately enc
broijerei iu colorei silk. not long asn. sud she
became q s0musmJuEst ior The next SIX nights
running.
There is a pocket telephone stretched across
fi1m TIE house of Young man in this town
CD the window Of bis sSee,hcArt INST opposite.
They are O. be married SON. ,ud 20 Is = touch
ing sight o. see the htt.e splrrrws perch ou
the string Aul pick 40 tae uiy as 70 STILES
along.
Science slys now thlt kissing on the lips
must be abuishel m doe interest of health -
Nos; potent. grave ana reverend soisuiurs.
scholars ani ph,i1s'rhers there are moments
You koow ns,hins vi. when D man jont care
twl c1uts Or science. aul wl-a hr o., going t'
r,l4rt kisla. where th.v 1.. mo- a tr. faas