St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1879-10-10
Squ1bs.
The first duty on ito cross it.

uC LII 81 uutJ c'' w
Blue-fsbing-Wl-
..IDuuIuS n1d0- one WHO COIL
templates digging one.
The proper implement for flooring a
ghost is spirit level.
Nobody has yet challenged Orion for
the belt.-LolUeU Courier.
A nice little boy calls himself COM
pass, because he is boxed so Often
dorchester Journal.
About the first thing a savage does
after being converted by missionaries
is to build better house and buy locks
for his doors.-OH City Derrick.
at is easier to raise beard than
raise dime," said young Oil citizen
who has stopped shaving.-Oa City
Derrick.
Snake stories should not generally be
credited, unless the name and residence
of the snake is given.-Peek's Mill1Uau-
kee Sun.
What is the difference between a
dairy maid and stormy petrol? One
skins the milk and the other skins the
water.-Ne,U HaUen Register. We don't
even now, quite see the difference
Boston Post.
The difference between a hen and a
mouse trap is that the mouse trap can't
set itself.-StilI,Cater Lumberman.
Look out for severe winter the fur
on the peaches is unusually long and
thick.-BoStOn Journal of Commerce.
Kearney's cheek, which generally
makes the Sierra Nevada Mountains
look like ant hills in comparison, shrank
| tn a mo nj NIL vrhnn Cronf
to see Philadelphia Bulletin.
Astronomers tell US that it would
take ,25O,0O0 years, provided there
was telegraph wire from the earth to
the nebula in AgdrOmeda, for a des-
patch to reach there. So no wire will
be put up.
"Man," says an exchange, Gloves the
mysterious" What's the use of stating
the fact ? Everybody knows hash is
good.-BOStOn Post.
A mules head does not contain a
brain capable of culture and refined
rearing, but it is wonderful to what ex-
tent the other end of his form can be
reared.-ROcheSter Union.
"How to Tell Bad Eggs" is the title
of an article in an exchange. When
you have anything to tell bad egg,
/ you must be careful not to break the
shell while imparting the information.
-Norristo,0n Herald.
I A young man sent twenty-five cents
to a New York firm for the purpose Of
\ learning how to get along without a
r blOtter in writing" aud received this
$ reply: "Write with lead pencil."-
S Rochester Democrat.
D 81 have an nfimity of the eyes," re-
s marked dismal man to Il well-to- dt
c Pawtucket citizen. won't you ex
n anime this and see if have been cheat
}. ed?" The citizen thus accosted tool
/. the article in his hand and inspected il
e 1t was book, brand new and with un
Il cut leaves. "Would you give $3.50 fo
Is such book as that 2" continued tn
l. man with the defective eyesight. "Cer
'f tainly," replied the citizen. 'Is it fuI
of plates and pictures 2" SIT is," reptile
the resident, unhesitatingly. "Is th
binding substantial, as we'll as orna
mental ~ Beautiful" was the answe
= "And you are quite sure that you woul
a give $3.50 for such noble book a
ID this 7" continued the inquirer 'In
Is minute" he replied. "Well, then, tax
#, it," said the book agent. 'I have
3 hundred and fifty more just like it i
lie the express Office. can change a fiv,
i You will not be Iobbing me-" The eli
Iy zen took the book, carried it to IL
re falls, dropped it into the seething eau
IS. dron of whitening water, entered h
DC house by the back door, and went n
On softly to bed.