, 1879-05-04

might lead. and family newspaper like TIE rRsz-
| usE. which aims, at printing nothing which would
bring blush to the cheek OF compositor-''
"Hy 10. never thought Of that" replied the
advance agent; 'bnt can tell you eome previous
ly unpublished facts about the robbery of-Mlle-
stcarine's diamond bootjack. at Kokomo." ~
don't think we won1d care to print that said the
city editor; 'we'd have to give the Burglars aG-
davit-which laye-that you only, paid him SEQ
for stealing 1t. instead Of $50, and that one SO
bill was bad, and we can't spare the space. Any
thing sfse2'' .@wc1l, said tho agent, desperate
ly, ''Mlc. Stearine was mo1acd at Parrce last
year, and ii any man doubts it can show him the
| knitting needle they burned her with" "That
| may do for the eHete civilization OF the
| East,". said The imperturbabte editor;
"but tn last actress that iwaa round here
was willing to bet bly, money that when she was
moxaed bits Of her hide of as long and thick
as wagon-trace and her howls threw the inmates
OF Deaf and Dumb Asylum nineteen blocks OF
into Mysteries" ,''Thcn her advance agent was
damire, said the agcut, impetpously; *'bnt can
let you have little item that will intercst.you
readers immensely. About two weeks ago Mile.i
Stearine was recognized by an old gen,}---"
'Oh, that old gentleman is fraud, said the edit
OF; Hhe's identified whole orphan asylum Of act.
resses during the lost fortnight as his 1on@-1ost
sisters, and his COUSINS and his aunts. TIL bet
5on CIV suat, ~ you plou1ee ut4u, = - p'ose tn1s
he's fraud: *'Wcll, hang it, y cried the advance
agent, what is legitimate news up here: Don't
you fellows know sensation when you see It: 1
can't have her fired at because ahe goes into hys
terics at the sound Of firearms. Though might
have the assassin use an alr-gua, or bow and
arrow. by Jo that's good idea. AL Chicaeos
going wild about archery, and it'll take. Just you
wait till next week, and I'll give yon M item thet
satisfy the canons Of your fas1dlous tase up to the
handle" -
\ a benevolent but rather green young
wQman who was married in October Inst, having
nee1 Of some one to assist her In her sewing,
thought Of answering an advertisement in .TnR |
TRIBUNE, but Was di8suaded from this course BY |
d friend who recommended hor to employ an AM
atenr seamstress instead. ~ Mrs. So-anl- So -:
said the friend, t. is widow and has seen better
days, and comes OF one Of the best families iu |
Michigan, md she scws with such taste, solldity,
mud rhythmic grasp TINT it would do the heart--I /
mean tue driving -whecl-or sewing machine good i
to see her," Accordingly the benevolent but green
yonng woman employed Mrs: So-and- so, and they
were speedily engaged in considering some large
sized dolls clothes IN Committe OF the Whole.
Then Mrs.. So-and-so went assiduously to work,
and meanwhile told her employer her whole family
history from the word ''Gol" and they snapped
stories about tho chicken-pox, and the mumps,
l1u The gentlemen who hau adOrcd them, and
whom they should haye married, until IL O'Clock, !
Shen bIrs. So-aud-so said, with 6ign |
''Ah, how different things arc! T remem-
,er that ut II O'Clock, when I lolled |
II the Ian of richeB r a1ynys Ind |
ny own servant to bring me M glass Of fine old
hcrrY and q niece OF cake, oh, II nv poor A1cer~
ION could only see me now! But. then. You don't
most always know sometimes how things are going
q turn out. don't i1f'' Her te,nuorory emntover
ould not very we'll refuse to send out for the sher
r after this and she did TO- and the amateur seam-
tress resumed her work with much yipor ,t,,onph
did not seem to the young married lady. her EN-
,oyer. IL if thew had done ou,,c as n,nch that
noruing as d uracticcd seamstrcss onoht to do<
r4. ,.~.. -. .... --..u. -, 80, .C-., /