Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1879-08-10
JUVENILITlES.

JUVENlLlTlES.
A nice little boy calls himself Compass
because he is boxed so often.
| There is boy in Kankakee so exceed
lngly bright that his mother is obliged
to use peice of smoked glass when she
looks at him. ~ ~
A beautiful custom prevails in many
parts Of Europe Of planting a tree upon
the birth of every child. 1t saves wear
and tear of slippers.
Little boys now go down to the river,
stick their toes in the water and exclaim,
Its getting bully" What IN the world
can they mean?
The other day professor in German
asked an unregenerate Junior what the
| gender OF a certain noun was. The Jun
Tor quickly replied: 81 think it is ncu-
ter, sir. At any rate, it is neu-ter me, y
A boy may not be as good "a Judge of
things as his father, but he will never
allow the latter to select a .jack-knife for
hlrl-if he can help it.
Never mind, sonny, the rain makes
| boys grow remarked Massachusetts,
tramp the other day when he took silk
umbrella away from lad in the midst
of rain storm.
professor, is there any danger of dis
turbing the magnetic currents if exam
inc that compass too closely2" And the
stern Professor, loving his little joke,
promptly responded, "No, sir, brass has
no effect whatever on them
When you see woman going toward
the river with good sized pole in her
hand and'a wrinkle across her nose, you
needn't think she's gong fishing. Not
much; she s got boy down that way
who promised her, with tears in his eyes,
ne wouldn't go in swimming.
Professor Gin composition class -''You
may have for one of your subjects for
your next essay, Manners "Can we
write On bad manners in college? Pro-
fessor-''Certainly write about whatever
you arc best acquainted with"
It seems that the eleven school chill
dren who died so suddenly at Jacobs
Mill little village in Northern Vermont,
were not poisoned at the brook, as at first
supposed, but were the victims of diph-
liberia, induced by foul pools and SINKS
under and around the school-house. The
warning IS seasonable.
A little girl at school read thus: "The
widow lived on a limbacy left her by a
relative" "What did you call that wore? e.
asked the teacher; 'sthe word is legacy,
not limbacy." But" said the little girl,
''my sister says must say limb, not leg"
In a primary school not very long ago
the teacher undertook to convey to her
pupils an idea of the hyphen. She wrote
on the blackboard "Bird S. nest and
pointing to the hyphen, asked the school,
"What is that fol?' After short pause,
young son of the Emerald Isle pipcd
out "Plaze, ma'am, for the bird to roosht
on!'
This is the way in which Sunday
school boy ratified off the Third Com
mandment, with the effect of making his
mother think he was giving Cherokee
version Of verse of a hymn:
Shltnut AXE thname
Thlblofthe godn vain;
Flordnut oldim gifts
Takthisnamin vain.
| "Look at that little creature!' the
friend said. "By Jove, that's the small.
est man ever saw in my liter 'Really T.
his companion carelessly rejolned. eyes
really and truly, too" "Do you mean
to say you have ever seen smaller?'
said the friend, and he soon got his an.
swer. ''My dear fellow, I know man
so small that if he has pain he CANT
! tell whether he has sore throat or q
stomach ache.'
| Pat was a greenhorn, and worked fol
an Essex county farmer, and being set to
till up cart, was told not to load on to
tail first or it would tip up. Pat did just
what was forbid, and up went the cart
His employer came back in a rage and
asked HIM what he meant. Pat was
dumbfounded. He went round to the
front of the cart, laid hold of the tongue
and at last gasped out: ''And shure, sir
is this not the tail?'
-"Her voice was ever soft,
| Gentle and low; an excellent thing in Il WON
| an
have been thinking Of the precise juno
ture when mans wife tries to tell hin
clear across whole roomful of company
that one of his suspcnders has fetched
loose and is swinging in the breeze about
three and one. half inches below the fur.
theIest reach of his ultimate coat-tail-
Burlington Haaokeye.
One Of the school board, going his
rounds as an amateur, put the following
question to scholar in country school
''How do you parse, Mary MIXED the
cow?'" The last word was disposed OF
as follows "Cow is noun, feminine
gender, singular number third person
and stands for Mary 'sStands for Ma.
ry" exclaimed he of the board; chow dc
you make that out2" Because" added
the intelligent pupil, eff the cow didn't
stand fof Mary how could Mary milk
| hor2n