Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1879-07-20
DOWN-EAST WIT AND HUMOR.

The gravest animal is the ass, the
gravest bird the owl, and the gravest fish
the oyster. 1t is the fools only who are
serious. Gravity is often the very essence
of imposture. Gravity of demeanor is no
test OF mental capacity. There are people
who think they are pious when they are
bilious. Most of you can call to mind
persons who never make an attempt at
mirth. l have some as invinclble as the
old lady at Concord: "Have you given
electricity a trial for your complaint,
madame" asked the minister, as he took
tea with the old lady. sElectricity?n
said she. "Well, yes, I reckon have. I
was struck by lightning last summer and
hove out of the window, but it didn't
seem to do me no sort Of good.
On the morning after the first delivery
OF this lecture in Massachusetts, town tile
driver who was taken me to the station
said to me: "That was pretty itol'rable
good what you gave 'em up to the hall
last night. I haven't seen nobody that
didn't like it but old Deacon Fry, and he
never likes nothing. He said it might
be well enough for light minded folks,
but he thought there was parts on it
dreadful shallow" The principle of
mirth is not a deep one, but it is as in
nate in the mind as any other original
faculty we possess. More sayings and
incidents provocative of true mirth can
be found nowhere than in our Nothern
states on all subjects. We are apt to find
only what we look for, and this peculiar
wit often has to be explained to people
in good set terms
l once heard man cnuuired of in a
shop as to the health of his wife.
ooh, we'll" said he, "she's pretty poor
ly;she don't seem to get no better at all.
She has been sick about seven years, now,
and the doctors don't appear to know
what to make of it; but she kind o. hangs
along and it is great trial, L declare, I
DO wish she'd get well, something, .
But the other party gravely acquiesced,
aid neither of them saw anything funny
in it.
frequently the speaker has no ade-
quate conception of the force of his own
remarks. "I'm kept so busy with this
big estate my brother left me-" said a
sharp Yankee lawyer, II declare, some
times l almost wish John hadn't died" I
remember having read, in letter from a
tourist IN our northwestern states a des-
cription OF the difficulty of shooting the
rapids of one Of our northern rivers and
the slow process Of polling up stream
again. Two of the settlers undertook to
dispense with the usual boatmen; the
boat was upset, and the two Adventures
were swept rapidly down the river. A
tall, gaunt shopkeeper ran down the pier,
crying, "Save the red-headed one! For
heavens sake, save the man with the red
head" This started the people to work.
and they saved him. Toe tall, gaunt man
waited to see that life was not quite ex-
tinct, and then turned away with the re-
marx, II wouldn't have had that man
drowned for considerable. He owes
me sixteen dollars" "Well, there's
something in that" said one of the boy
ISLANDERS. II expect man don't know
how valuable he is In this world till he
owes somebody some money. Then folks
wants to know where he's goin'.' A stage
driver in the white mountains, when ask
ed what he thought of the Notch, replied
"Well, | was born around here, you know,
and don't mind it so much. But if /
should &c down to New York, reckon
likely I'd gawk around considerable my
self" Violent contrasts are common to
both wit and humor. None of the more
acute writers on mirth vary much from
this idea. The most exhaustive defni-
ton has been given by DR.. Barrow: some
tinfes the wit of thing lieth in the pat
allusion to known story; sometimes tits
wrapped up in dress Of humorous express
sion; sometimes couched in .bold form
OF speech or in acute nonsense sometimes
in affected simplicity; sometimes from a
crafty resting, but oftener from-one
hardly knows what" But we NAV get a
more distinct idea from the remark Of
Hazlitt; Man is the only animal in the
world who laughs, because he is the only
one who can see the difference between
things as they are and things as he knows
they ought to be- During the existence
of the Dorr rebellion in Rhode Island, the
leader of the insurgents drew up his men
on the summit of hill near Providence.
Pointing to. the advancing troops, he said
''Yonder, my men, comes the enemy
the aristocrats, who would rob you Of
your suffrages. Fight 'em to the laat
gasp, and, if you have to retreat, do it
with your face to the foe, selling your
life dearly at every step you take; and
(as the troops came nearer as I'm little
lame, l guess I'll start now
When the charming Sidney Smith
complained to a Yorkshire lady that it
was so hot he wished he could take off
his flesh and sit in his bones, we detect
the same principle. A small boy was
hoeing corn in a sterile field by the road
side when passer by stopped and said /:
"Pears to me your corn is rather small y