The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1879-03-27
Washington's Views Of Love.

Mr.. B. J. LOSING, in an article in the
Philadelphia Weekly Times, prints a let
ter written in January, 1865, by George
Washington to Eleanor Parke Custis, i
granddaughter of Martha Washington
and his adopted daughter. In this he
gives her the following advice on the
subject of love:
"Men and women feel the same incli-
nations to each other now that they al
ways have done, and which they will
continue to do until there is a new order
of things, and you, as others have done,
may find perhaps that the passions of
your sex are easier raised than allayed.
Do not, therefore, boast too soon or too
strongly of your insensibility to, or re-
sistance OF, its powers. In the compost
ton of the human frame there is good
deal of inhammable matter, however
dormant it may lie for time, and, like
an intimate acquaintance of yours Ia sis
ter just married, when the torch is put
to it, that which is within you may burst
into n blaze; for which reason, and espec-
tally, too, as / have entered upon the
chapter of advices, / will read you lec-
ture drawn from this text.
"Love is said to be an involuntary
passion, and it is therefore contended
that it cannot be resisted. This is true
in part only, for, like all things else,
when nourished and supplied plentifully
with aliment, it is rapid in its progress t;
but let these be withdrawn and it may be
stihed in its birth or much stintad in its
growth. For example, woman the
same may be said of the other sex) all
beautiful and accomplished, will, while
her hand and heart are undisposed of,
turn the heads and set the circle in
which she moves on fire. Let her marry,
and what is the consequence The mad
ness ceases and all is quiet again. Why?
Not because there is any diminution in
the charms of the lady, but because there
is an end of hope. Hence it follows that
love may and therefore ought to be un-
der the guidance of reason for although
we cannot avoid first impressions,
we may assuredly place them under
guard and my motives for treating on
this subject are to show you, while you
remain Eleanor Parke Custis, spinster,
and retain the resolution to love with
moderation, the proporiety Of adhering
to the latter resolution, at least until
you have secured your game and
the way by which it may be accomplish
ed.
"When the fire it beginning to kindle
aud your heart grows warm PROFOUND
these questions to it: Who is the inya-
der? Have l a competent knowledge of
him? Is he a man of good character, q
man of sense? For, be assured, sensi-
BILE woman can never be happy with a
fool. What has been his walk in life?
Is he q gambler spendthrift or drunk
ard? Is his fortune sufficient TO main
tain me in the manner l have been accus-
toned TO live and my sisters do live?
And is he one to whom my friends can
have no reasonable objection? If these
interrogatories can be satisfactorily an
swered there will remain but one more
to be asked. That, however, is an i'm
portant one. Have 1 sufficient ground
to conclude that his affections are en-
engaged by me? Without this the heart
of sensibility will struggle against a
passion that is not reciprocated--delica-
cy, custom, or call it by what epithet you
will, having precluded all advances on
your part.
"The declaration, without the most in.
direct invitation of yours, must proceed
from the man to render it permanent
and valuable, and nothing short of good
sense and an easy, unaffected conduct
can draw the line between prudery and
coquetry. 1t would be no great departure
from truth to say that it rarely happens
otherwise than that thorough paced
coquette dies in celibacy as punishment
for her attempt to mislead others, by en-
couraging looks, words action, given for
no other purpose than to draw men on
to make overtures that they may be re-
iected."