Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1879-02-28
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The young man was evidently honest in
his intentions, but three years of con-
slant counting had failed to overcome his
bashfulness. They were sitting in chairs
at respectful distance apart. Said the
young man. having spent five minutes in
search Of subject: -.
''How do you get along with your cook
ing2'' 4 .sss.. ~
Nicely replied the young miss; aI'm
improving wonderfully. I can make
splendid cake now"
"Can you?" said the young man, in
pleased manner. ssWhat kind do you like
best2''
81 like one made with -four and sugar
and citrons and raisins and currants, and
lots of these things, and beautiful FROST
ing on top" responded the young miss.
''Why, that's wedding cake!" ex-
claimed the man, nervously.
81 mean wedding" said the young miss,
shyly. They are published.-Rockla,,d
Courier. .-r4e.e,... s. y, Z. .-e.s-. y
JUST LIKE 'EM.-A bashful Yokel was
paving his addresses to gay lass of the
the country, who had long despaired of
bringing things to crisis. Yokel called
one day, when she alone was at home. At
ter settling the merits of the weather, Miss
said. looking shyly into his face, II dream
ed Of you last night
did you? why, now ~
Eyes. dreamed you kissed met"
s''Why, now? what did you dream your
mother said p .ae ssr. ,,...-,e..a 80
ooh, I dreamed she was not at home p
A light dawned on Yokel's intellect,
and directly something was heard to crack
perhaps Yokel's whip and perha ps not,
but about a month more and they were
twain, &c.
A bright little boy, who had been en-
gagged in combat with another boy some
time ago, was reproyed by his aunt, who
told him he ought always to wait until
the other boy, ''pitched upon him.
''Well." explained the little hero, shut il
wait for the other boy to begin, I'm
'fraid there won't be any ight.'
A schoolmistress, while taking down the
names and ages of her pupils, and e
names of their parents, at the beginning
of the term, asked one little fellow,
whats your fathers name 20 ''Oh, you
needn't take down his name he's too old
to 60 to school to woman" was the re-
ply.
''You told me, sir, that the horse wa
entirely without fault, and yet he is blind
ted countenance Of the loser by the trans
action and said with charming aoiyete. II
do not regard blindness as a fault, sir; it
is a misfortune" lr tes
A New York man, who had not been out
Of the city for years, tainted away in the
pure air of the country. He was only re-
suscitated by putting dead fish to his
nose, when he slowly revived, -exclalming ::
4sThat's good-lt smells like home!7
"There's q great difference between
housekeeping and boarding out" said Mr.
Young-husband, for when boarded out
had to wait sometimes half an hour for
my dinner. but now have it just when
can get it's
"Have you cologne?" she asked, sNo.
masam,;' replied the druggist 81 have no
scents at ALL" She said he didn't look as
though he bad.
Eyes, Pm good dancer" said the bar
Der as he sheared off the blonde locksof
customer. ''See me clip the light fan
tastic tow 5
Jones says the Methodists are the only
denomination that know enough to applaud
man when he delivers good prayer be-
fore them.
s'All of which 1 saw said the big
steam-driven '.circularo to a pile of lum-
Der. ''Part of which I was,'' replied the
seautling.
s'Aary. have you given the goldfish fresh
water?" "No, man. What's the use
They havn't drank up what's in there
YETI
A romantic young mansays that young
woman heart is like the moon-it chang
e. continually. but always has man in it.
Salaries have been so light this winter
that the weakest women have been known
to draw their husbands pay.
An Iowa lad of sixteen has been sued by
miss of fourteen for breach of promise,
So we go.
ssSacred to the memory of three twins.''
is the inscription over a grave in New
Hampshire.
No man can be thoroughly acquainted
with his family history without running
for office.
The happy father of wo-weeks-old ba-
by calls it MARS newly discovered sateI
ite.''
Economy is wealth. Even tho stoye-
pipe is coming out with its last winters