Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1879-10-24

1911 .
Womans writes-Po stscripts
Made to order--slayes.
Important If truc--a wife.
Bottled flour is not beyond the reach ii
burglars.
What relation does the spur OF the mo-
ment bear to the point Of timeg
Anybody is apt to be nstalsen. bit i boy
never pats a short horned hull on thu heat y
but once.
The sun Is 800, TIMES larger than the
earth, and yet It persists In striking 50 small
thing as n man.
"lf was not sustained by hope my heart
would break, said an old woman when her
seventh husband was buried.
Bob Ingersoll must be very forpiying
sort of person. He Is very bald, and vel
he bellows loudly for woman suffrage
when the corn is waving means when
a superabundance OF the grain, In d LIQUID
state causes the sidewalk to osciilate.
Business suits" says an advertisement.
so 10 does; and the more there isOf II the
better i suits, providing i Is profitable.
Givca new-tlcdgcd paragraphera little taify
and he is sure to spread himself, and when
he spreads himself hegets too thin.
II Is not fourteen years since the war
closed, but 1t Is very remarkable how a hand
organ can keep manned soldiers looking 20
young.
Ideas are the engines that draw men unto
the higher planes Of being 1t IL from IDEAS
that aspirations spring, and II Is by them
that development Is produced.
A contemporary spells II "prograni,r and
defends Its right TO do so In good, set terms,
but the same party Is inconsistent enoughtb
put useless 'g" on egg!
Healthy place here 7" asked visitor, who
was prospecting in the neighborhood of
Denvor, Colorda. stranger, yes,n was the
reply. "Ien years ago we had 10 kill two
old men to set the cemetery a-going.
The observing New Orleans Pscayune re-
marks that when two men are constantly
trying TO capture the same Office one Ii apt
to call the other chronic Office seeker.
"Will the shoe certainly holdY' asked the
horscman. II am sheer OF L." answered
the blacksmith This Is not forged, Elnl d
fact. His own bellows "hlewp on him
whats eggs this morning." Eggs. Il
course" said The daaler "Welln aala ihs
customer, "Pm glad Of it, for the last |
bought of you were all chickens.n
A college student in rendering 10 his a.
thcr an account of his term expenses. In
serted "To charity, thirty dollars His Z
father wrote back II fear charity covers
multitude of sins"
Teachcr-"Femnineo Of triarg" First bright
boy lasntanyn Teacher--"Nextp Sec
ond bright boy---"Nun.' Tcacher-sei'haf's
right" First bright boy Indignantly ejacu-
latcs-"lhat's just what said"
AS the tree Is iertillzad by liz own broken
branches and falling leaves, and grows out
Of its own decay, s. men and natinna m.
beiterod and improved ~ trials, refined nuf
Of broken hopes and bIishted expectations
Iheh Is n man in Sotisiern Indiana ninety
years old, who, on the authority Of the Gin
cihhati c0DtHtercsat, doesn't use glasses. The
fact Induces the Boston POSI- to conclude that
the gentleman takes his b tin dipper.
"Lot there be no difference between us"
said he, as he awkwardly sidled over the
interviewing space or the sofa. "But let
there be difference between u.s. she replied.
rs she quietly withdrew 10 neighboring chair.
"Your American dinners are q revelations
said the English tourist rs he sat down TO n
table well garnished with green corn and
watermelon That night he dreamed OF
more curious things than st. John baw in the
Isle Of Patmos.
A skinless grape, secdless hBlato
woodlcss peach, a cOrcless apple ara rinaieea
are the needs Of the NM DntiI
some agricultural genius invents filfse psy.ll
Iiaritcs, VIC shall have to be con4nt VIII
Lhe very bunging work Of nature,
pason Davis preached at Reno Ae other
Sunday, and while taking breakfast 4 Parson
Jenyer's house, remarked: "GuessI n take
some more steak, as | have 10 ireach."
Guess III brace up Il little, too, "hjoined
Jenvcr, passing his plate for MULTIPLICATION
Of the meat; "Ive got to listen"
A waxwork figure of Franklin, II exhi-
bition In France, Is labeled "FraIklu In.
ventor Of electricity. This savad aiier
having made seven voyages arolkI the
world died on the Sadwich Islands N was
ieyourcd by sayagcs, OF whom not Angle
fragment was ever recovered"
A Indy walking down King str2 the
other day, while she cast fiir-tive glaf 4 x
The store windows, was heard 10 rekrk.
inat HUSBAND crmlnc - such an Old MI
he won't get me a new sett this fall. I4en
notion 10 gopher now boa that sabN h,
furnish such things "a he had otter Ian
have % bcavery careful; II catch him k,i-
ng with young mink again, III make tim
pull his weasel, or seal his destiny for I'm.
won't bear 1t any longer, 80 now
"You play poker, OF course said Inc
Gentleman 10 another, who was shufilifk
Dack Of cards in such scientific manner7as
o bctray an intimate acquaintance with Ihe
lrticles, mo, never do" was the respo}se
Indeed" exclaimed the questioner; IaI
bought everybody In Eureka PLAYED po} n
i am the solitary exception" And ho~t
hatT Well, you sec, go, into a big game
lad AN ace full, and lost 800; then heia
our queens and got beat out Of $500 more.
then said 70 myself; '0ld boy This Amt
your game; there's no money n Il yo1'd
better stick 10 solitaire 4 ain't ~ exjiiinv n
mt lis saier and 70 I've sttekn, 4