Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1879-01-09

he detected an unusual stir, but moth
ing fearing he walked up the marble
steps and gave the teii a Jingle that
brought the hired girl to the door in a
hurry. She opened the door just wide
enough to peep out. and was about to
shut 1t again, when our reporter thrust
his cowhides in just far enough to win
a victory
Cant come in said the girl,
must" said the reporter, 'smust."
| Cant" said the girl, Madam has
the jim jams on account of the loss Of
her plants last night
"But | must, that is what | am
here for, to ascertain the damage to
our city florists, last night" sternly
continued our reporter as ha crowded
his way in. .'Glory, glory" came
Mrs. Onion, who had been securely
tied by her polonaise to the bed post
By Mr.. Onion, in order to keep her
from harmlng herself. She was wav-
ing the withered stalk of a mammoth
Gala, and the burden of her song was;
"Just look, just look a there. Sc
my Glaucium Corniculatum! See my
Laarestinas. See my OrdHs Flsri-
bundi Gosh, amt [ mad though!
Who'll please kill me? All my beau-
tiful-Who'll please give me dose of
mix vomiea! 7 paid twenty six dol
lars for them plants, and now they
amt worth the powder to blow, oh,
blow my pretty psnsies, blow"
Our reporter took in the situation. A
colOred girl was rubbing her down
with the "Balm of thousand Flow
srs," but that wasn't enough. She
wept and laughed, and our reporter
'.slid out, weeping at such display
of grief he always weeps when he in
teryiews onions The next spot our
reporter visited was Quality Row.
He raped at the door of Mrs. Cam
ella Japoni.a. ,... ,.,n@- la-s.
Come in, said a schrill voice, and
in went our reporter. ...
Good morning Mrs. Japeaica, L
called to see how your house plants
stood the terrible FROST" said our re-
porter. " a..'..
cha! ha! said Mrs. jap
s'stood the frost % look. there sir,
"How's that for high All froze, but
it don't mattsr, can get more next
spring, and it will be capital excuse
Tor going to the city. I'm satisfied if
the frost is, good morning. and
Mrs, Jap disappeared, and SO did
our reporter. He next called on Mrs.
Pondlilly. Mrs. p. cordially received
our reporter with beaming smile.
"a Happy New Year to you Mrs.
Pondlilly. May | inquire how your
beautiful house plants stood the Sc
we're frost of last night? 4a5 .#asia.
| .l. t"'Certainly you may" said Mrs, P.
s'just look at those beautiful plants, as
green as the verdant hills in June.
Let them speak for themselves, not a
one frost bitten-all as blooming as
the morning" .....' t.t-..-. ~.
t.,H'5''fWhy! you are poetieal, Mrs, T, !;
,enthusiasticl rejoined our reporter"
"Well, rather, you see love flow
ers, and flowers and poetry, you know
are intimately connected. "
/. elbow were you so successful with
your plants. observe thNt every
where, almost, the plants have been to-
tally spoiled" rejoined our reporter.
!. "Well, Mr.. Reporter, [ will tell you
as it rs no secret. You see | have
Just the best and kinGest husband in
the world, and he insists on sitting up
these very cold nights, and keeping a
FIRE, because he knows l am in love
with my plants, as Fam with him. and
| OF course I let him. Wouldn't you?
|, Ourreporter thought he would, and
though Mrs, Pondlilly was as pretty
as picture, he was glad he wasn't a
Mr.. 1Pondlilly if that condition involv-
ed sitting up all night with a lot of
green herbs. .a al.w -aH .m,. <-A2
faaOur reporter left with a pleasant
! bow, and received in return a smile as
he said ffgood morning, that almost
took his heart out through his lips, as
he closed the door aid uended his way
to his sanetum. thinking:- > .@a@
Bright flower may wither. and freeze,
aaH- and die. II - ..--'.. I. = '..'o
q ID Betwixt January and next july" 5'it
III. a.. MeClatchie challenges any