Connecticut western news., 1879-10-08
WIT AND WlSBOM.

-Lazlness grows on people. It be- gins in cobwebs and ends in iron chains.
 -Bs constant in what is good, but be- ware of being obstinite in anything that is evil.
 It is good to dwell in amity, though it is amity hard thing to do with some people.
 The only original thing about Sit ting Bull is the aboriginal.-[Owego Record.
 It is always oppressive to hear per- sons constantly striving to say witty or funny things.
 Only what we have wrought into our characters during life can we take away with us.
 Happiness can be built on virtue alone, and must of necessity have truth for it's foundation.
 When @ corner Ioafer dies in Ten- nessee, the newspaper says 1: Another old landmark gone."
 It is better 10 be laughed at for not being married than to be unable to laugh because you are.
 Tt was very properly said of scan- dal-monger that he never opened his mouth but at somebody's expense.
 A fisherman is a very irresoluse and unreliant person. He won't even sit down on his own hook.-[ Boston Post
 It is strange that it wearies Q mans legs so much less to stand in front of a bar than it does to stand by work bench.
 There won't be any Indian Summer this year, says an exchange. The Indian Agents have made arran gements to steal it.
 Says the Whitehall Times: "Sleep is the great leveller of mankind" It does appear to be sort of an evening arr i f6Es senxsuks si&ia- -trne.
 Little Gerty (after waiting some time for desserD -"s Uncle, don't you have anything after dinner?" Uncle-~ "Yes, dear the dyspepsia.
 Three things conducive to happi- ness-A full stomach, an. empty pocket and a clear conscience. We are fear fully happy.-[ Whitehall Times.
 The Emperor Sigismund said that man had right to destroy his enemies, and then added that the most effectual way to destroy an enemy is to make him your friend.
 A priest asked of condemned crim- inal in Paris jail: "What kind of conscience have you?" " It is as good as new," replied the prisoner, "for have never used it."
 A farmer, whose son was clerk in New York, wrote to his employer aslk- ing eff there was anything in the boy" "Yes," he replied, "iust after he has been to 8 saloon." -"Your son. madam, persists in do ingnothing, says the director. "Then," replies the woman, by no means discon- certed, "you should give him the prize for perseverance.
 Tt takes at least three able-bodled men to do the guarding for half-dozen prisoners, but one good, economical wife will do the garden for @ healthy family of six.-[ Keokuk Constitution.
 A rather gayly-dressed young lady asked her Sunday school class "What was meant by the pomps and vanities of the world ?" The answer was honest, but rather unexpected "Them flowers on your hat"
 If it wasn't for fear of frightening all the turkeys and chickens to death, the Philadelphia Chronicle Herotd would like to call the attention of the country to the fact that Thanksgiving is not great ways off. -"I am not under arrest, remarked the thief when in the officers clutches; CT am simply in the hands of my friends" Thus doth the iargon of pol itics pollute the current of all lives and industries. II Boston Transcript An Irish lad had complained the other day before magistrate of the harsh treatment he had received from his father. " He trates me-" said he mournfully, Gas if was his son by an other father and mother"
 A man is always fool. If he be young, the world says when he is older he will know more if he be older, 1t says he is old enough to know better. and when he is old it says the old fools are the biggest fools.
 They were soon to be married. He had vague ideas of house furnishing, and he asked her what kind of carpets he should get for the parlor. She answered, "Axminister." And then he warmly protested that it was none of the minis
 ter's business.
 t -Z., the painter, is drunk from night 3 until morning. He drinks everywhere , and everything. "Poor boy" says the I tender-hearted Monselet, "he was dis l appointed in love. It was great blow " to him, and he drinks to drown his grief. !, $ It seems, then, says some one, the !" his grisi knows how to swim"