, 1879-08-21


Mule. X. enters tho chamber OF her coIorcl
waitl,g-womaa while tho Abigail Is at her toilet.
"atercy inc, what ia thati" she says, pointing to
q box inscribed, "Lnmpblack for tic complex
ion." 40, tlmt's my pearl.powderp
A Park policeman seeing IL yellow dog near
rwo handsomclv1trcssoi wnnpu approaches rc-
spcctfully a9l says: "Doos this heauchifu{ little
creachurc belong 10 you, ladlcs1" "Mcrcy,
no!'' Park Policeman fltfeing his cane}-" Get
cut o hcrc, Jon bcast.'
"so now you arc 3. a, What do you In
tend to dol'' ''Oh. I'm going to tako my
degree aud then lc professor, and then I'm
going to hurry through my thirty years 80 as to
be entitled to my rot!rlng pension rs soon as
possible, an1 then shall on]oy my wctl-carncd
rcst.h
y fatr young woman, having purchased
1ittlu b!lou Ut house, gives holsc.wnrmnG
festival, to which sao Invites her physician aud
his wife. .i'ha tiorsor-naturnlsy- alonc.
"oh, wi Why ,n ltant ,t, you ern: s Mmo x; will!
dear" rerliss tl.e e, husband; !, tile tecoud ia u'at
shp uns q bad cold" r.
The. other evening an bid gentleman ad-
yanctd the proposition Tint never In tho course
Of ha long lie bad llu seen wulnun that WINS
not charming. "oiI, realT, now" safd a 1aly
whose nose WIS OF the puFest Ukraine breed.
"don't sou think PIN ugly:" Not at all,
mntlatne,'' replied tile gnllant old gentleman,
= You Rrc ~ nncel, fresh tall'n from Heaven,
only you TEL! Oh Jour noser'
A foreign tragcltennc was ouco upon time
boasttnE 0afuro company of artists Of
eho l,aa sternty rchulsed her sovereign for Offer
luz her nn insult. ~ enid 10 hts Majesty, said
]: 'Your Majesty tl,u King cat, dispose Of my
tffc arut my fortune at hfs will, but not Of my
we're right" sad Augustne Brohun: att Is a
maxim IN inv that wllero i1lere is nothing the
King loses bis rights"
The old Baron Is dead. There Ia good reason
Tor believing that no Is III pureatoey--at Tie
very least. Ills daughtcr-in-iaw Is dcstrous
for & Yon do not @ nvS ko% shas saa sort TT of ~
love" says the Dowaeer. "llo was almost
Quizotic In his punctl!ousness md sense Of
homer. llc would not thank any ono to pray
Tor llm. lle Ia too prnt1d-hu will tnsist OH ro-
mainnE there I'LL asc Inst moment rather than
be under an obligation to aay oue'
4 tragedy In one act aul two minutes. econe:
4 s'ttlng.ro0m, with sota and /, loor l..
Draulntls pcrso1up: On this sotn, lady; with
lis at,n around hcs whist, a gentleman. Tile
practical carpet-tag In Ills tAnd. pcrcctving tho
Two luvsrs hu f1ltscs Its l,n,Nla to heaven nI for
moment IL frozcu with horror; then drawlnga
revolver ams at tho guilty nair. The revolver
"Ohln iIiesh The ue.,ticun1,-" All" {dies).
Second gentleman, rutllinE forward and exnni-
tninG tho corpaes-" Great heavens, I nistook
the nat; this ia the, newly-.uarrtol couples
room down stalrs." Quick curtain.)
Servnut-G,rl ito ortunc-tel!cr)-" Mime. Caglt-
ostro, want y0ll to tell mo my fortune. How
lnucll'll It bel'' Nine. Cagliostrt,-" -Four
frances" SD" Four frnncsl oil, In, reg
ulas customer; you've never charged mc norn'l,
two fraucs." Mme C.-"Two francs wus for
lifting tllu vel Of tu future but niwuYs cliarco
four fur searching It's .ltptAs To lhcIr uttermost
sfecesses." S.-G.-" III u!ve you three francs-
thrce and hnlt." Nine. c." Impossible, rash
!ates canuot atIo.t! it--tliey can't he expected
10 rln thu future at deal ioss ont Of their own
pockets just fur your accommodation"