davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Freie Presse fuÌˆr Texas. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1865-1945, 1879-11-01

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Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08
A NATURAL MISTAKE.

A young man from one OF the oack
towns came in to buy e present for his
girl last week. His wondering gaze being
fixed by the gorgeous display in dry
goods store window, he entered the store
and basbfully stopped in front Of pretty
young lady behind The counter. How
much arc those ?" be inquired, pointing
to a pair Of handsome y wrought, nickel
garters in the window. "Seventy-fye
cents" answered heyoung lady, sweetly,
handing out the article in question and
bushing slightly. 81 think they are
kinder pretty, don't you ?" inquired the
young man, anxious for somebody else'i
opinion. "Very," replied the young
miss "they are the latest style" "Ey-
cry body wears them, don't they ?" con-
tinued the young man. almost every
body" said the young lady, affecting an
uncOncerned air. 81 was goin' 10 get
them for girl that l know" said the
young man, somewhat neryously. "Do
you think she would like then ?" Il
should think she might don't know"
returned the young lady, blushing again.
"Well, I don't hardly know myself" "
said the young man, picking up one Of
the dainty articles and examining it
closely. "You don't suppose they are
too large, now, do you ?' "Why IL
-" stammered the young lady, the
bushes growing deeper. "The' seem
serter big like" continued the young
man, not observing her confusion "but,
Of course, wouldn't be certain. She's
middlin' size, but not very fat, and meb-
DO these would 5e little too loose.
should think she was just about youl
bigness, an if these would fit you Of
course they would fit her. Now, just
suppose you try them on, an if" "Sir!I
exclaimed the young lady behind tha
counter, in an awful voice that lifted the
young mans hat on tho end Of his hair,
'you are insulting :" and swept away to
the rear of the store, leaving tho bewild-
cred young man standing in dumb amazo-
ment, holding in his hands what he sup
posed was beautiful pair OF bracelets.
And when one of the men clerks came
and explained his mistake, the young man
from the back town struck direct line
for his team, and in brief space OF time
was tearing toward homo at rate that
threatened to irretlievably ruin tho Old
family horse. He won't buy any brace
lets now until he's married. -Roehtanl
lNel Courier.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

A SAD CAsE.-A bout two weeks ago,
as tho overland train WAS passing Chey-
enne, the attention of the passengers was
attracted by the lamcntalion OF a poor
Irish immigrant, whose berth had been
robbed during the night, and every pen
ny OF his scanty savings stolen, and
whose family would, therefore, arrive
beggars in the strange land. The char
liable passengers at once began a sub
scription, which finally amounted to
something over 500 When the money
had been handed the sufferer. pious
plausible looking man dressed in black
and adorned with while crayat, drew
him aside ut one OF the stopping places,
and said:
MY poor man l am truly sorry for
you. Your sad case touched me deeply.
| am myself well prov ided with this
worlds goods, however, and so viii give
you $3.50 more. Horo is $500 gold
note. Give me the $3.50 you have and
keep the rest. May heaven bless you!"
The poor Irishman did as requested
with many blessings on the generous
stranger, who insisted that his gift should
not be made known. When the passon-
gers reached tn is side of tho bay the
pous- looking phlanthrepist was no
where to be found, he having evidently
gotten OFF at Oakland for reasons OF his
own.
The next morning the immigrant re-
paired to a bank to get mis- note changed
The teller picked up the bill and began
narrowly examining it.
"There-there is n,thing wrong with
the bill, is there?" gasped the poor fol
low.
Now. the clever reader has seen all
along what was going to happan. He
has read lots of just such incidents as
tins. 1t is the od-o!d story. Well-
we'll SEQ about that
"Nothing in the world is The matter
with it," said the teller quickly, and he
handed the man fifty tens. That ends it.
IS. J.. Nees Letter.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

No DANGER The Philadelphia
Times thinks it is hardly worth while 10
indulge in any premature worry over the
threatened immigration of German So
cialists. There is nothing in the laws of
this country to prevent a mans making
a fool of himself If be wants to, and as
soon as the German Socialist finds there
Is no restriction on idiotic antics he will be
very likely 10 restrain his anxiety to be
idiotic. Denis Kearney had the whole
business continent to roam over in his
patriotic work of hanging bondholdcrs
and eating Cinnamon raw; nobody mo
le.ted this untamed revolutionist, and he
finally tired himself out. The German
Socialist can have all the room he wants
in this country.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08
D1NG-D0N6 CHARLEY.

Cases Of mistaken identy are rarely
pleasant, but, peculiarly distressing one
quite recently occurred in this city, says
the s. f. iStock Exchange. A few days
ago a well known business man, who is
greatly addicted 20 duck shooting, in his
peram bulations about San Pablo marsh
met a congeniai friend whose face is IA
miiiar TO frcquenters OF Pine street. The
two, after a splendid days sport, returned
to the city. On reaching the slips on this
side the merchant in the fuluess Of lis
cordiaity, invited his friend to dine at his
heme on-strect. The cougenial com
panion demurred. Being man fastidi-
Gus about his dress. he feared 70 present
| himself to the family OF his friend in the
| roagh garb of hunter and bearing the
miry evidence Of the chase. The object
ions were quickly ovor-ruled by the mer-
chant. ~ on can use the bath room at
my house," said he, "and then l can
lend you a clean shirt, so you will be all
right" This was satisfactory, and so
the twain wended their way to the abode
OF the entertainer. On their arrival there
the sportsman was at once shown to the
bath room. Noanwhiie the young wife
of the merchant was totally unaware that
the stranger had been brought into the
house, and as she happened to pass the
bathroom door she saw a light within -
Accordingly, without ceremony, she
pushed open the door and went in. The
| sportsman had dIvested himself Of every
| thing in the shape Of clothing except his
well we must say it-except his shirt,
and he was engaged at that very moment
in the ungraceful but necessary act Of
drawing that garment over his head. His
face was entirely concealed and the lady
still thinking that chubby" stood before
her stretched out her hand with Il grace
ful swaying motion, and laughingly said;
Ding g-dong !! Charley, supper's ready"
The touch and the word nearly petrhed
the sportsman.
The fair wife, wholly unconscious Of
me hWkWhTu nllslake She had made,
danced down stairs and into the sitting
room, and there-there-sa her legal
lord.
why, I thought you were in the
bathroom" she exclaimed.
mo, but | have a friend there who is
to take tea with US; SO hurry up, my pet,
and have an extra plate laid," WAS the
reply.
The awful and naked truth was too
much for the horriaed wife, and she
gasped out, II cant stay for dinner
I've call to make" she dashed from the
room. The astonished husband, after
endeavoring in vain to find an explana-
ton Of his wie's strange action, went
musingly upstairs after his guest. In
the bathroom fresh surprise awaited
him, for the room was empty. The
abashcd sportsman had dJnnod his clothes
in n hurry and silently stolen away.
The merchant having since learned OF
tho joke, rather enjoys 1t, but it would not
be a pruden. thing to whisper Ding
dong, Charley" to that sportsman while
he has shotgun over his shoulder.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08
WHAT SAVED HIM.

A young wife in Michigan had just got
settled in her home. Al seemed fair and
promising, for she did not know that her
husband was drunkard. But one light
he came home at a very late hour and
much worse for liquor. When he stag
gered into the house, the wife who was
greatly shocked told him he was sick, and
to lie down at once, and in n moment or
two he was com fortably on the sofa, in II
drunken sleep. His face was reddish
purple, his breathing was heavy, and al
together he was pitia looking OBJ
ject.
The doctor was sent for post haste. and
mustard applied to his feet and hands -
When the doctor came and felt his pulse
and exam ined him and found tha: he was
| only drunk, h. said:
He will be all right in tho morn
ing"
But the wife insisted that he was very
sick. and that severe remedies must bo
used.
"Iou must shave his head and apply
blistors," she urged, "or l wild send for
some one who will"
The husbands head was accordingly
shaved closely ard bIi.ters applied.
The patient lay all night in Il drunken
sleep, and, Notwithstanding the blisters
were eating into his flesh, it was not till
near morning that he began to beat about
disturbed by pain.
Abou; daylight he woke up 10 most
uncomfortable consciousness Of blistered
agonies.
What does this mean ?" he said,
putting his hands to his bandaged
head
Lie still you mustn't STIR" said his
wife "you have been very sick"
~ nm not sick"
"Oh, yes, you are ; you have the brain
fever. We have worked with you all
night"
Il should think you had," groaned the
poor victim. whats the matter with
my feet"
"They ara blisterod"
"Well [ am better now; take of tho
bisters-do," he pleaded piteously.
lie was in II most uncomfortable state
his head covered with sores, and his
feet and hands still worse.
"Dear," he said groaning, "if should
ever get sick in this way again, don't be
alarmed and send for doctor, and, above
all, don't blister me again"
"Oh, indeed will all that saved you
were the blisters, and if you have another
such epell l should be more tighten cd
than ever, for the tendency am sure-is
to apoplexy, and from the next attack you
will bo likely to die uness there are the
severest measures used"
He made no further defense. Suffice it
TO say that he never had another attack.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

SIZE SEwED on HIS BUTroNs.-Old
B.ummer IS tight-Gstcd. Several days
ago he said to his wife: "Maria, | want
you to look over that broad4lo:h vest Of
mine aud pat now buttons on it, cause
I'm gong to card party tonight"
But, Ely" answered Mrs. b.. 81
haven I any buttons to match that vest
AMI"
"Thunder!" broke in Blumme", 1.-THE
idea Of woman keeping house rs long RS
you have, an pre'endin' 50 be out Of
buttons. BY George! I!beIievo you'll ask
me for money to buy them wtn next"
Thatcvcning Biummer hurried through
his sapper and began arraying himself
for the card party. Presently be called
for tho broadtloth vest, and Mrs. b.,
with marvellous promptitude, handed it
to him. lie TOOK it, hastily unfoldcd il,
and then, u, his oye took IN its complete
appearance, lie stood as one transfxed =.
1t was "a six button vest, and there were
six buttons on it, and the dazed optic OF
Blummer observed that The first, or top,
one, was a tiny pearl shirt button, and
that tho next one was brass army-over
coat button, with L. S. cleaning upon
it, and that number three was an oxy-
died silver affair, and that number four
WAS horn button, evidently from the
back Of one Of the Puritan fathers coats
and Chen came a suspender button, and
then, Us the dazlIod eyes Of old Blums
NOR reached the bottom button--a poker
chip (ound in Biummers pocket with
two holes punched through tho gave a
snort that made the chandelier jingle.
There is, after ali, fine sense OF humor
about Blummcr, and he laughed till he
cried. And there won't bo any button
money grudgcd in that household here
after.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

a MAN AMPUTATEs HIS Own LEG.
"A strange circumstance, very illustra-
tive of Indian life and character, comes
to us as follows:
A short time ago a young Chippswa
hunter was shooting squirrels in the
woods that border Lake Huron, near
Penetanguishine. when, bysome chance,
n large bligh:ed pine fell upon him, knock.
ing him down and crushing his leg,
which was fractured in two places. He
could not rise-he could not remove the
tree which was lying across his broken
leg. lie was far from tho probability OF
passing aid, and to lie there and starye
to death in agony seemed all that was
left to him. In this dilemma, with all
the fortitude and promptitude ofrsmance,
he took out his knife, cut off hi. own leg
bound itup with his sash, dragged him
selraleng the grouud to his canoe, and
padded himselfhome to his wigwam, on
distant island. There the cure Of his
wound was completed, and the man is
still alive. Strange as this may seem, it
is strictly true.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

A BLACKMAILTNG SCHEME.-lt is a
we'll known fact that there are no rats in
Bodie. An impecunious individual, who
at present is ekirg outa bare existence
by court ing the goodness Of chance, tsld
the writer. in confidence, that he had II
plan by which he could replemi,h his
depleted bank account. His scheme is
to import from Sacramento three or four
hundred rats, and when he has them safe :
~ Gagged in Bode, he will visit al, the
principG houses OF that place and init
mate to the owners that unless they pay
him certain royalty on each rat he will
turn them loose in the town. He fatters
himself that be has good thing
E,SmeFdid0 Hcraid.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

ONE DROP OF INK.-"I don't see
why you won't let me play with VIII
Hunt" pouted Walter Kirk, II know
he does not always mind his mother
and smokes cigars, and enco in while
swears just u little; but l have been
brought up better than that. lie went
hu2t me, and | should think you would
trust me. Perhaps / can do him some
good" Walter" said his mother,
take this glass of pure, cold water, and
put just one drop of ink into it," "Oh,
mother, who would have thought ono
drop would blacken glass so!' Eyes,
1t has changed the color of the whole.
has it not? 1t is shame to do that
Just put one drop of clear water in.
and restore its purity" said Mrs. Kirk.
"Why, mother, you are laughing at
me. One drop, or dozen, or fifty,
won't do that" "No, my son; and
therefore, | can not allow one drop OF
VIII Hunts evil nature to mingle with
your careful training, many drops of
Of which will make no impression on
him."
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08
EOW TO COMMENCE BUSINESS.

There are many young men who are in
the habit OF oxcusing their idleness and
inefHciency with thep'ea that they can Go
nothing without capital. The lack of
means IS the ready reply they make every
appeal TO action. They imagine they
possess in Themselves al the prerequisites
. to success except capital, in addition to
their other imagined virtues, they would
30 great things 10 the world would grow
and astoni.h The natives with the bodness
OF their enterprise. They would become
rich and lay the world under obligations
to them by the maguiaeeuce Of their BEN
eiac,ions. This Is the way they think
and talk, and they roll the vain glorious
idea over in thcir mind. until they come
to imagine that the world is an immense
loser by thoir poverty.
These persons forgot one important fact,
that all capital is the product Of labor.
That nearly all rich men in this country
were once poor. That nearly every per-
sonal fortune they can enumerate is either
the product Of its owners toll and skill,
or the representative Of his fathers toll
and skin.
How did the makers Of these fortunes
get along without capital ? Had they
spent the yigor Of their youth in idle and
foolish lamentations over their poverty,
they would have lived and died poor.
/ Capital allied TO labor and skill can work
wonders in the war Of material cnterpris-
ca. Bat money is not the Indispensable
thing to young men. There are other
kinds OF capital lesides accumulated
money. Brains, muscle, Industry, hon
esy, diligence, truth, fidelity, skin, tact,
education-all these arc capitals, and all
OF them have q commercial value, which
the owner will be able, sooner or later, to
command in the market. Provided with
these, any young man in this country may
make more than he needs to spend every
year, md thus have something at the end
Of each year 10 invest as money capital.
/ II he needs money let him 60 to work and
make it, and thus give proof OF his ability
to use it proGtably and judiciously. If
we go into any great city, or into any
prosperous agricultural district, we find
the capitalists are those who made their
fortunes without any outside aid. They
did not waste their time in repinng at
their poverty, ana in sily dreams Of what
they could do ifthoy had the money to do
it with. They wen. boldly and re-o'utely
to work they toiied oad thought and
Planned, and kept toiling and thinking
aud planing patieatiy until at last they
gtasped the fortunate moment, and sue,
cecdod .-NcUudu HeTcl3.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

DON'T TELL WHO WROTE Ir.-How,
ard Owen has lecture on "tIhe Man who
Makes Newspaper" ;" and in it lie comes
actoss some first rate ideas. Most people
imagine that newspaper is huge fail
with which certain individuals arc to be
lashed. The person on whom the dnil
is to be used is very multtudinous. lie
may be poor actor, tiresome lecturer,
dull speaker, and unmuslcal singer
troublesome neighbor, in fact any one
who happens to offend the man who
comes to get the paper to 'go for him. -
Sometimes person wishes 10 use the
paper against a railroad company, the
management Of a steam boat line, the
Board of Supervisors, or the United
States Government. One man left the
office OF a newspaper recently in high
dudgeon because the editor would not
allow him to rake the Almighty, fore
and aft, in his columns. Mr.. Owens
gives the following letter from man
who wanted the paper decidedly TO in
kihuate that ais neighbor is not the most
desirable person in the world to live
next to- and who wrote the following
unootruslve note: "Here Mr.. Editor,
please insert this item and obljce n sub-
scrioer: The rantankerous old curmud-
geoh, whose pestilentia influence poi.
sons the air OF street, has Of late
been engaged in questionable tran,ac.
tiOns for the purpose of adding to hi.
Ill gotten gains. Murder is in the heart
of this pestiferious old cuss, but th,
miserable blatherskte lacks the coura 2,
to execute it," Put that in as edjlorja
and don't lot any one know who wrot
it,"
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

IT is said Of NorbGry shat he would at
aay time rather lose a friend than joke.
On one occasion he began the sentence
OF death in this wise: Prisoner at the
bar, you have been found guilty by a
jury Of your own countrymcn Of the
crime laid to your charge, and I must
say l entirely agree with the verdict, for
see "Scoundrel" written in your face"
Here the prisoner interrupted with
"That'a strong reAection-from your
Lordship!" whereupon the judge, keeniy
apprecnting the joke, commuted the
sentence INTO transportation for seven
years.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

JOSEPH had been engaged as man
servant the hight before, and : A. N. was
still in bed, eujoyinga a pleasing waking
dream, when his master rang the bell,
rang it again. rang triple bob'major,
and finally, receiving no answer, burst
into the reom like whirlwibd.
Here I've been ringing for you for
the last hour, you lazy brute; what do
mean, SIT, by this cohdGct? What do
you mean?"
Il was waiting for yeu To-"
"Wating for me! Dashbiank you, l
hired you to wait on me-"
you h ired me and agreed TO hoard
lodge and clothe me. / was waiting for
you to come up and clothe me. Hand
me them pants, will you, now that you're
here?"
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

THE jews had 10 surnames, nor had
the early Greeks and Romans. Latterly
the Romans used three names: the first
sponding to our Christian name, the
second the class or rank name, and the
third the family name. Modern sur
names began to be used about the tenth
century, when MOBILES took the name of
their estates middle class sons OF their
fathers, as johnson, Thompson, etc, and
others OF trades, as SIN ith. Cooper,
Tqio;, etc. Fancy names also wero
given to foundings, AID nicknames be-
came surnamcs.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

A DEAD HERo.-Ref-rring to the
death OF Elrod Ryan, a workman in tha
Bodie mine, at Bode, who the other day
teIl down tho shaft, $50 feet. and was
instantly killed, the independent says:-
: he poor fellow, when about fifty feet
from the surface, with a thoughtfulness
which entities him to place in the rank
OF heroes, sung out to the men who were
working ia the bottom, LOOK OUT, I'm
coming" lie was plainly heard on the
surface and in the mine below, and the
men in the shaft had time to get into tho
adjoining apartmentand save their liycs.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

An HONEST GUARDIAN.- Sceptics will
have to abandon the tA cory OF total de-
pravity. Dayton, Ohio, has just pro
duced man who was appointed guardian
Of a little girl when she was eight years
old, and had fortune Of $50 600. A few
weeks ago she arrived of age, when the
guardian paid over to her $40 600, with
out dedrcting a cent for compensation.
1t is a pity the name of tho gentlemaa is
not given. Had he been defaulter it
would have been published all over the
country.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1879-03-08

DOOMED HIMSELF TO ErERNAL 81
LEHCE.-A pythagorean philosopher has
just died in Utica, New York. His namo
was Hayes Hinman, who doomed himself
10 eternal silence fifty years ago, and
carried out his sentence so far as is known
with the exception Of two excamat.ons
which were involuntary and pardonaLe
under the circumstances. lie was sixty
six years Of age. When ,e was lad Of
sixteen he heard his father swear nj some
member Of the family. Shocked at this
perversion OF speech he made solemn
vow never to speak another word during
his natural life. Thus felf-doomed to
dumbness he lived among his talking fell
lows for fifty years. During that time
he had but two slips of the tongue.
Meeting with an accident which bruised
his fingers, he calculated "Oh !" At
another time he saw q snake crawling
over a sleeping child, and said "See ="
Those two words were the extent OF his
uttered vocabulary for fifty years. And
SO he kept his oath that he would not speak
and consequently not swear at all. His
many devices to avoid conversation, under
the impulse to speak, without the power
behind it, mado him bundle of eccen-
tricities. Yet, with them all, he was
great favorite in II large circle Of friends
and acquaintances. Hinman lett small,
fortune of S24 600 to newphew, with the
sdmonition Keep your mouth shut"
This recluse Of the tongue was a close
student. and kepta diary 0? his thoughts
and sensations aud experiences during half
century Of forced silence. A female
Hinman would be q moral and physical
impossibility.