The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-03-08
HUMOROUS.

The man who carries his railroad
ticket in his Maitland makes a fare dis
play.
Almost all people are generous to a
fault, If the fault happens 70 be their
own.
The man that never smiled again
did not take his blue ribbon in vain.
The pancake is like the orb of day,
because 1t rises In the yeast and sets
in the vest.
The modern golden rule is:-Let your
due unto others as much as others due
unto you.
Nothing 30 terrible as a woman
scorned," except a paragrapher who
finds his item used by n contemporary
without credit.
The price of a 2-year old tame bear
in Michigan is only $40; and they are a
source Of great joy in a family with SUI
perfiuous small children.
When a man owes a debt and refuses
to pay more than half Of It he calls the
arrangement a compromise with his
creditors. The creditors call it a swim
die.
We like to see q maD 80 regular in
his habits that getting up half an hour
earlier than common to bail water out
of the cellar will make him sick.
~ curse the hour. we were MARKEDLY
exclaimed an enraged husband to his
better half. To which she mildly re-
piled, "Don't my dear; for that was
the only happy hour we have ever
SEEM I
Some crusty, rusty old curmudgeon
OF u man gave the following toast at a
celebration:-"Our Gre engines-May
they be like our old maids-ever ready
but never wanted
Thompson says you may talk of your
water cures. your movement cures and
your blue glass cures, but there is Moth
ing like the %sinecure, after all.
A Connecticut man has refused for
fourteen long years to let his wife
speak to a neighbor, for fear some of
them would become friendly enough to
want to borrow a drawing of tea.
A young lady was worrying an edi-
tor by reading her poem to him, and
asked, when she had finished: What
part of my poem do you like best?"
''The part You have not read,'' said the
editor.
A good colored man once said in u
class meeting: Brethren, when l was
a boy l took a Ratchet and went into
de woods. When I found q tree that
was straight, big and solid, l didn't
touch dat tree, but when I found one
leaning q little and hollow inside, l soon
had him down. So when de debbil
goes after christians, he don't touch
dem dat stand straight, and true, but
dem dat lean a little and are hollow in
side.r
At a Methodist conference meeting
in New York, u man got up and said
he had long wished to speak, but his
wife wouldn't let him. His wife had
died, however, and, having his liberty
AT last, he proposed to exercise it. In
about two minutes the entire confer
ence wept over the death of the lady as
over the loss of q personal friend.
AS the happy couple were leaving the
church, the husband said to the part
ner OF his welded life: Marriage
must seem a dreadful thing to you;
why, you were all OF u tremble, and one
could hardly hear you say 4 will" II
will try and have more courage and say
it louder next time" said the blushing
bride.
Actual occurrence in u Chicago
street car:--Stylish lady, holding II lap.
dog, is about ready to leave the car.
Dog manifests impatience. Lady says
in her sweetest tones: wait, darling,
till mama puts OIL her gloves" Pas.
sengers o with laughter.
81 say, my frien', can you (hic) tell
Inc where the other side of the street
isYn Certainly--just across the way
why do you aska" "Why (hic), be,
cause a minute ago asked another fel-
low the same thing, and (hic) he said
this was the other side of the street.
A baby out west has been christened
Jerusalem Sniggins.H jerusalem
what a name!
If Americans go to Pekin China, why
should John ..Chinaman not come t.
peek in America.
The late husband, when he finds tina
somebody has stolen the keyiole out o
his door, and difidently rings the ben
knows exactly who 1.-THE coming wo
man" is
The prince of Wales has been elected
honorary member of a Boston militi;
company. Unless the government
wishes the Indians scared to death
this news should I've broken to them yer,
gently.
Practical Yankee; ''wen, yes, sir.
give In to you. Shakespeare was 1
genius. But he didn't kinder seem t.
put it to u practical use. Never bene
fitted civilization with a washing ma
chine, nor n patent turnip-peeler, no
anything of that sort. Sill he was
smart man."
A French physician says that to al