Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1879-10-30
Anecdote of Artemus Ward.

! | met Artemus Ward but once. was
/ quite young at the time and wa, acting il
city editor OF the Star. published at Schen-
ectady, y. \. The papers whole name va.
/ the Ereniag Star. Well, while | was city
| editor OF this sheet met Artemus. He had
| come among us to deliver his famous lee
| ture, and the whole place turned out to hear
him. Strange as 1t may appear didn't 90.
/ lou see, | was iathoms deep iu love with a
/ girl at the time, aud had rival. This RI
val. who had recently blazel out in a new
suit OF clothes, was al the lecture. and. sit
/ ting by his side. as happy as kitten with
/ gill OF sweet milk concealed about its per-
son, Was the idol OF my heart-.he. alas /.
hckle queen OF any young affections. This
I Is the reason that an hour after the lecture
was over | happened 10 stand on canal
! bridge, looking sadly down into the water.
| Although heard no iootstep suddenly
/ became conscious Of presence. Looking
I up, | saw standing beside me a slender
| form, whose face IN the dim starlight seem
/ ed 10 be an unusually sad one.
| Pardon me- he said; saw you look
| ing dreamlly into the water as II you IN sht
be a poet. or prehaps coroner. and was
attracted TO your side. Has misfortune
oyertshen thee. or art thou thinking Of 4
lost one-or TWO, or nearer one yet. aDd a
dearer one still, In the shape of a W"
| explained that | had lost no money. and
during the course OF conversation revealed
the fact tina, | was local editor.
''Il must be terrible strain on the In
,ellect TO attend 10 the duties OF local
editor" he remarked. tendrrly. Long,
long time ago had a relativc--lt Is fam
iy tradtlon-who was a local editor. He
succumbed 10 his Tremendous intellectual
excrtlon at an early age. Noble soul. he
died 10 the harness-at all events stub
lead-peucil and an old note book were
found Ia his coat tail pocket after h, de-
m.se. His last words we're. set EN- up
again alluding, you understand, 10 the
type"
was about To say something In regard
TO my heavy editorial responsibility. but
Ward checked ire by asking:
What creek is ih.i"
"Creck" / exclaimed. why, this j.
the Erie canal"
How far /, 1t nayigable;"
why, OF course 1t Is nayigable from one
end to The other, was my surprised reply.
We'll" solemnly replied Ward. That
beats all the streams ever heard Of By
the way, | think | can make out some large
boats anchored up the stream thcre-whai
are they, pgvpellers or side whee.er>?'
| replied that they were merely canal
boats, mored by horse power.
shallow a. Thai ifa,. SAID irismus. '' -
''As shallow as what:
"Why you say tina; those boats are pulled
along by horses. Now, OF course they
must walk along in front OF the boat,
musnt they: | used to run a stoneboat on
my lsmented Uncle Johns farm. aud Dis
tinc:ly remember that the horses walked
along in front
mentally declared that had never be-
fore met with such ignorance. ! spent
some time explaining the peculiarltirs OF
the biz ditch, aud just as | had begun 10
think that at last | had set the stranger
right on the subject, he knocked my hopes
into kindIpg wood by remarAing:
Il suppose that when the stream dries
~ in the summer they put the boats Oh
wheels, don't theyf'
Then | began again to explain every
feature 10 the canal from New York To
Erie. How attcutively he listened to NV
words. can still sre the melancholy
face liz oy the sad light OF the stars. ana
those mournfnl eyes looking into mine 80
earnestly; and again hear, as did then,
after had talked for nearly halt an hour.
going fully into the details of boating, tie
low, pathetic drawl:
Any sswmils OIL this stream that you
know Off"
Shortly after some gentlemen came
along who seemed 10 be acquainted with
my obtuse friend Presently one called
him Artemus and then | commenced To re-
fleet. | always reflect best when I'm hid
away somewhere. SO | went and hid my
SELL Detroit Free Press.