The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1879-05-16
THE HORRORS OF pER1HEL1A.
N. Y. Tribune

His name is not Grim, as it might be,
but Grimmer, which is properer; and he
lives in San Jose, California He has
published a pamphlet called 1.-THE Voice
OF the Stars" and a most melancholy
voice 1t is. 1t sets forth the intolerabie
things which are to happen in conse-
quence of 1.-The perIhelia of the four great
planets, Jupiter, Uranus, Neptune and
| Saturn, in 1880, or between 1880 and
1897" The effect of the approach to the
sun simultaneously of SO many great
bodies, Grimmer says, will be unspeak-
ably disastrous to our own. According
to this San Jose astrologer, among other
pleasant results, every drop of water in
the earth, and above the earth, and on the
| earth Will be more or less poisonous
| Then Will come seven SOrrOWful wears.
Ancient races will be blOtted from the
face of the earth. Fifteen millions of the
inhabitants of America will die, unless
stringent sanitary measures are adopted,
as they will not be, for everybody knows
that they never are. Then will come
| storms and tidal waves and tornadoes,
| with volcanic actions of the worst sort :
mountains and valleys will change places,
| and "naVlgatOrS grow pale with alarm
at the capricious defiexure of the needle y
The particularly energetic way in which
volcanoes will "belch forth their lava, -
the suffocating fumes of sulphur which
| Will escape from the earth, the sudden
disappearance OF islands, including, per
haps, the island of Manhattan, with an
unprecedented number of shipwrecks,
viii be followed by fanaticism, blood
shed, murder and robbery; while IRE
marks Grimmer) "every one will he alb
sorbed in the trying task of keeping
alive" The poor will die by tens of
thousands. The doctors will raise their
prices; but Mr.. Grimmer advises every
body, when these dying times arrive, to
put no faith IN physicians, but to take
| copiouS draughtS of warm water, abstain
from animal food, and wear cotton dip
ped in camphor in the nostrils The pes
thence will ravage until 1885, and then
| Will come fires which will rage with
fury until 1887. The sun will discharge
oceans of flaming hydrogen gases. There
will be tremendous showers of meteors.
| Dense black clouds will veil the sun for
| days. Binding flashes of lightning will
i1lumine the sOmbre sky. The f1esh-eat-
er and alcoholic imbiber will go hand
in hand to the grave. Strife, discOrd, war,
| floods, inundatIons-but enough! No
longer let us dwell upon the coming ca
tastrophei 1t should be mentioned, how
ever, that according to Grimmer General
Grant will be elected President in 1880,
and reelected in 1884. In 1887 he will
be in special danger from railway collis-
sions, after which he will have series
of years of peace and happiness, and Idle
idoliZed by this country, and respected
and honored by the world"
The great Grimmer, as citizen of
California, is bound to let off that state
easily. 1t will be the last and least suf-
ferer from 'the most malignant plague
era the world has ever known" 1.-THE
Pacific states,'' we are told, will be a
veritable Paradise of peace compared
with the hellish strife that will be wag-
ing throughout the world" We see how
it was. Grimmer evidently was afraid
| of the vigilance committee, should he
venture to include San Jose in the gen.
eral ruin. He would have been waited
upon by deputation of the most ener
| getic citizens, and compelled to revise
his calculations. With one end of a rope
about his neck and the other tied to some
convenient branch, Grimmer would have
BEEN made to figure out nothing but
good luck and plenty of whisky to San
Jose from 1880 to 1888. He sagaciously
escapes his fate. He kills off the rest of
us, but he spares the Californians. What
| is there for US to do but to appoint an
/ opposition Grimmer of our own, who
| will deduce for our comfort from othe
| perihelia of the four great planets" moth
ing but health, prosperity, and good
time generally2