The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-11
Mr.. Blifins' First Baby.

The first baby vas a great institution. As
soon as he came into this breathing world as
the late W. Shakespeare has it, he took COM
mand in our home. Everything was subservient
to him. He regulated the temperature, he regu-
lated the servants, he regulated me. For the first
six months of that precious bahy' existence he
had me up, on an average, six times a night.
Mr.. Blif6ns," said my wife, ''bring a light,
do; the baby looks strangely; l am afraid it will
have a fit !"
OF course the lamp was brought, and of course
the baby lay sucking his fist, like the little dear
Mr.. Blifins." said my wife, 81 think feel
a draught of air 1 wish you would get up and
see if the window is not open a little, because
baby might catch cold"
very well knew.
Mr.. Blifins," said my wife, just as l was
going to sleep again, : that lamp as you have
placed it shines directly in baby's eyes strange
that you have no more confederation"
/ arranged the light and went to bed again.
just as l was dropping to sleep my wife said
"Mr. Blifhns, did you think to buy that pare
goric to day for the baby? ?"
"My DEAR said I, 'will you do me the Unjust
ice to believe that l could overlook a matter SO
essential to the comfort of that i~nestimable
child ?"
She apologised very hadsomely, hut made her
anxiety the scapegoat. l forgave her, and with
out saying a word to her l addressed myself to
sleep.
"Mr. BliHins,'' said my wife, shaking me.
{. you must not snore so; you will wake the
baby"
"Just so-just So, said l, half aslsep, think
ing / was Scion Single.
NJ Blifins, +" said my wife, 'will you get up
and hand that warm Cruel from the nurse lamp
for baby7 The dear child If it wasn't for his
mother | don't know what he would do. How
can you sleep so, Mr.. Blifins ?"
=" suspect, my DEAR said 1, Sc that it is be-
cause l am tired"
"Oh, it's very well for you men to talk about
being tired, ,; said my wife. 81 don't know what
you would say if you had to toll and drudge like
a poor woman with a baby
1 tried to soothe her by telling her she had no
aided in answering the baby's requirements, ]
stepped into bed again, with the hope of sleep
ing.
"Oh DEAR said that inestimable woman, in
great apparent anguish, g how can a man, who
has arrived at the honor Of a live baby of his own
sleep, when be don't know that the dear creature
will live until morning"
L remained silent, and after a while, deemine
that Mrs. Bli6ins had gone to sleep, 1 stretched
my limbs for repose. How long l slept / don
know, but | was awakened by a furious jab il
the forehead with some sharp instrument.
started up, and Mrs. Blifins was sitting up il
bed, adjusting the baby's dress. She had, in
state of semisomnolence, mistaken my head for
nocturnal pincushion. ! protested against sncl
treatment in somewhat round terms; pointing e
several perforatiens in my forehead. She told mt
! should willingly suffer such triaing ills for th,
sake of the baby. | insisted upon it that | die
not think my duty as a parent to the immorta
required the surrender of my forehead as a pin
cushion. This was one of the many nights pass
ed in this way. The truth was, that baby wa,
what every mans first baby is-an autocrat, abso
lutte, unlimited.