The Portland daily press., 1879-06-13
The Ineligible Man.
from Lippincott,s Magazine. ]

lHioH Llpplucolls MdSdZlHeI
The ineligible man is generally gentleman
OF good connections and some small fixed in
come, which is sufficient to serve as narcotic
to ambition, but which from its incapacity to
provide for more than one person puts matri-
mony out of reach. "Oh, I'm no marrying
man, he says, and is conscious of his freedom
and OF his privileges. The best Of everything
seems to be offered to him; he is ami de la
nadlSon among all his old set of friends, both
masculine and feminine, who have married
and settled down; he may drop in anywhere to
dinner, and is favorite guest at ladies' lun-
cheons; he has invitations to parties of all
kinds, and never has to buy more than an en-
trance ticket at the opera.
The ineligible man is in no way to be con-
founded with "detrimentals," ineligible al
though the detrimental may be- The distinc-
tion is so broad that radical difference may
be perceived at once. The detrimental is
considered $50 dangerous'-the "ineligible" is
$50 safe" The detrimental is regarded as
an open foe by parents and chaperons; the
ineligible" on the other hand, is the friend
OF both, and stands, by some gift of nature,
even at an early age, toward young ladies in
loco PARENTS, and is himself capital chaperon
"Let me go, mamma it's only with Mr..
BROWN the girls urge. "Only Mr.. Brown is
plea in extenuation of anything unconven-
tional. Nobody but Mr.. Brown makes a
partie-carree, hand at whist-fills the odd
corner everywhere.
In fact, a man who is known to be distinctly
not marrying man has his hay to make in
long spell OF pleasant weather He is confiden-
t1al friend to dozen sets of debutantes, who
enter society as it were under his auspices he
crltlclses them, counSels them, aids them, does
everything except interfere with their lovers
The moment lover comes forward the ineligi-
orced 1n to 4 he % Is Drighsr
claims must give way. He has, however, the
privilege OF taking the place of usher or grooms-
man at the weddings which follow; he dandles
the babies on his knees if so inclined, and NAV
have few named after him; he enjoys a sort
OF hereditary friendship for the offspring of the
marriages he himself promoted. 1t may seem
for long stretch of years that he has roses
without thorns the sparkle of wine without
the dregs, all the comforts of life without any
drawbacks. He has his little income which
he knows how to spend in such way as to get
the utmost out of it for himself; he has pleas
ant rooms in pleasant quarter of the town.
and makes his meals at clubs, or goes out to his
dinner, breakfast and luncheon. Whereas his
married friends endure the miseries of domes-
tlc annoyances-bllls wretched servants, sick
wives, troublesome children-he has his quiet
room, his luxurious meals his ease and leisure
in all the daily habits of his life. No skeletons
lurk In his cupboard; he has nothing to fear
even If he has nothing to hope, and may calmly
barks which put out to sea.
All this may be very pleasant while man is
tolerably young. Then follows the time when
life becomes a sort of Barmecide feast for him.
On every hand there is beauty love and duty,
but not for him. Hitherto he has an idea
vague, yet still actual enough to throw little
rosellght over his future-that when the right
time came, and before it was too late, he, too,
should marry. He remembers with bachel-
ors unspoiled vanity, all the half triumphs of
his youth, and makes an effort to win perhaps
the daughter of one of his old friends To her,
however, and to all her friends nothing can be
so frankly prosaic so fatty antique as he.
lis as If December tried to enjoy the apple
blossoms of June.
1t is blank moment of disenchantment and
disappointment when the ineligible man" dis
covers that he is not nowadays ineligible be-
cause he has chosen a career without checks
and encumbrances, but because he is too old,
because the freshness and power of real man.
hood have left him.
He who will not when he may,
When he will he shall have nay.
He has disregarded the poetry and romance of
youth; he has been satisfied with the mere
shell OF existence, without reality of feeling or
truth of passion. An uncompromsing egotist,
he has closed his heart to the appeals which
actuate less selfish men; he has wanted no wife
and children to work and plan for; he has
waited until his power of amusing himself is
past before he has aspirations for the calm COM
forts of the treside. After playing at being
ineligible all through the years when he had
chance of making what he wanted of his life
it is only fair that in his age he should sud
denly find himself confronted with the idea of
his actual ineligibility.