Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1879-01-08
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NHITE-HOUSE LUNATICS.
Some OF the lHad Men Who Call Regu-
larly to See the President, but Who
Never See Him.

Some OF the Mad Men Who Call Regu-
larly to See the President, but Who
Never See Him. ...1 ......
Washington Star.
The daft people who find their Way
into the presidents room generally look
sane enough; but some let their mental
: weakness be known by their queer
questions and strange actions They
are maneuvred out as soon as possible.
but often cause, considerable trouble.
When person calls at the executive
mansion who is so insane as to be help
less OF, dangerous he is turned over to
the insane asylum or his home. From
clews furnished by themselves the
place from which they hail is often dis
covered, and theyare given transporta-
ton thereto AT government expense
There are such ~ number that have to
be sent to the insane asylum that it has
been suggested that a special appro-
priation be made for ia king them home,
as 1t costs more to maintain them at
the government eKpenselin the asylum.
? Some harmless lunaticsi have method
IN their madness AT stated periods
they pay the white house a visit. Their
| faces have become familiar. Among
these is an old gentleman who
lives short distance in the country,
near Bladensburg. He wears a large,
soft hat, salt-and -pepper pants, and
short black coat. His eyes are blue
and mild, with nothing wild about them,
and his hair is gray. He calls regularly
once in every two months. He comes.
in the door solemnly. Being asked
what he wants, he replies: q have
come to take my seat" He then tells
how he has been regularly elected presi-
dent, and would have come to enter
on his duties sooner, but work on MS
farm prevented his leaving home. The
ushers talk to him seriously about the
matter, and as q general thing he soon
leaves perfectly satisfied. The last
time be called he was somewhat per
sistent in demanding 'sthe presid entail
chair" in order "to take his lawful
seat. Being expostulated with he aex-
1piained to the ushers that they need
have no fear; he did not intend to make
any changes and would keep them all
in office. He didn't know, come to
think of it, that he would make any
removals at all. He might, however,
put Secretary Schurz out ofthe cabinet.
He was asked if he had a wife He re-
piled, NO" He was then told that no
man unmarried could be president. He
left imm ediately, with the expressed
determination to marry as soon as he
got home, and then come back and
take his seat" - 81 o. ''4 ~
A man comes down from Penhsylva-
MA about five times year. He is about
50 years old aud dresses neatly and
comfortably. He demands to see the
president. The treasury and the White
House have been decided to him and he
wants possession of both. The last
time he called he wore a pair Of badly
used up shoes and got slightly noisy.
When put outside the door he said:
II will submit this time, as | do not
wish to make Hayes houseless; but the
next time | come wantn no foolishness.
| want him to move out promptly. [
hate to be so harsh, but my shoes are
wearing out and [ must have nv rights.
just tell him how this case stands.
| a woman from Maine walked in one
day In a dress like that of Quakeress.
She stalked into the east room, and
spreading large Bible-which she car
ried under her arn-on one Of the win
dow seats, announced her text and be-
gan in loud voice to hold forth on the
necessity Of being born again. Sergt.
| DinsmOre told her she must not make a
noise. She calmly told him that her
mission was to convert President Hayes
and she had come to fulfill it, An eff
fort being made to escort her to the
door, she again became loud and quot
ed verse after verse from the Bible.
After much noise, but no active resist
ance, she was gotten out on theporch
and the door was closed. She left an
nouncing her determination to convert
Mr.. Hayes, and repeating Scriptu1al
texts all the way down the concrete
walk to the gate. .i-.. .''' 'i'5 1872.
A man from Ohio called a few days
ago. Hehad theory that the world
was coming to an end in q few days if
he was not made superintendent of the
naval observatory; in view that he
might: by his knowledge of astronomy,
avert the impending collision Of the
earth with all the planets. He was
promised the position and left satisfied.
Ohio. by the by, furnished quite a
| Hul1iOGI VI ouUjSCtH. ~ NOuldIl IOuI
that state, about 40 years old, with a
gray hat. a light wooden cloak, hand
some brown eyes and regular features,
came quietly last week. She said that
there was 81 900 up that she had been
elected governor Of Pennsylvania on
the greenback ticket. She had only
the week before gone to that state to
see about it, and not getting much sat
lsfaction, had come to the president to
have the question finally settled. She
exhibited what she called her s'creden-
tails" This important document was
the ticket issued by the greenbackers in
the recent elections IL Pennsylvania
and had on them, of course, the names
ofall the nominees of that party. She
was told that the president could do
nothing for her, and was referred to
Acknowledgement Devins. .,- e..