The Orangeburg democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1879-1881, 1879-04-18
HANDY 70 HAVE IN THE HOUSE. 3.
a woru1Ess H6s5SND, UTILIZED II BY A
4 ~ PRACTICAL WIFE.

'ThereIare some men who are. con-
sidered desirable as husbands, and
others who are quoted, as, hardly
worth the house room they occupy
or the provender they consume. OF
the latter kind was. the. little man
concerning whom, his iwife dreamed
that she went to a country fair where
husbands were exposed for sale. On
his begging her to tell him what she
found the price. to be of such as him
self, she replied, after some hesita-
ton, that she saw similar article OF
husbands put up in punches of doz-
en-, and offered at shilling bunch.
Such husband is. indeed 3 proiitless
possession. a shrewd woman in
New York found herself the wife OF
this kind of piece Of goods he
was idle and shiftless, and of so little
financial experience that even in
those rare instances in which he sue
ceeded in, earning any money, he
was unable to keep it long enough to
bring it home Instead of support
his wife. he was a burden on her, and
an expense to her. To avoid the
otherwise inevitable journey to the
poor house, she was compelled to
work, and to support the whole impe-
cunious family.
But there is o lining Of silver to
even the most leaden cloud, and this
struggling woman'happily discovered
that her man, had one talent which
she might turn to profitable account.
He could carve at dinner parties, and
this was the only thing he could do.
In doing this he was a crowning sue
cess. He had no more skill at max
ing contracts than at bringing money
home. . So the thrifty housewife con-
cluded not to-, turn him adrift. to
starve, as she feared would be neces-
sary, but to keep him at home, and
rent him out. as; opportunity offered. :.
From time to time she sought out all
the people she could find being about
to give entertainments, might need
the services of. a skilled manipula! or
of the ,carving-knife. Explaining to
these people the peculiar condition of
her domestic affairs, she whuld hire
her husband out for fixed sum stip-
ulating that the money should be
paid to herself, and not to him. An
interesting and novel style OF law
suit now arises from mistake IN the
payment. The husband had earned
seven dollars for carving sst the din
ner party of nabob., The nabob
thoughtlessly paid him the money,
and he as thoughtlessly spent it be-
fore he reached home. Thcrcupon
the wife undertook to collect from
the nahoh the stipulated sum, basing
her claim on the fact that as the poor
man was sort Of nobody, payment
to him was no payment at all. The
nabob resisted the endeavor to collect
q second seven dollar fee from him,
alleging that he had paid the person
who did the work, and that if that
improvident individual had nothing
to show for it, the misfortune should
justly fall On the poor fellow himself.
The wife successfully resisted this ar
gument by showing that she was the
contracting party, and that she had
hired her husband out just as liy-
cry keeper would hire out horse, in
which latter case, it would be mani
festly improper and insufficient to
claim that payment consisted in
handing the money to the animal.
The woman retires triumphantly from
court, happy in the possession of a
bit OF property from which, when
rented out she can draw substantial
income.
1t is not lawful in this country to
expose husbands for sale, but the fact
is now established that one may be
kept for hire. The lesson is one
which will carry comfort to many an
embarrassed girl who, having blum.
dered into marriage, finds she has
on her hands q lazy and lounging per-
son, who is of no particular use. If
she can discover even one talent, and
turn that TO account, she may set the
otherwise uuprofitable fellow to work
by renting him out to do the only
thing he understands. Thus is hope
- r.