davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
A Lazy Mans Views on Lying IN Bed.

Let US ~analyze this lying in bed a little fur
Their. L maintain that, in the mere fact of lying
IN bed, there is something healthy and recupera-
tive to the system. The wheels of life are oiled
and eased. The proper and Legitimate purposes
of stopping In bed is to go to sleep. There is no
tonic or medicine in the world like sleep. The
more sleep the brain gets the better does the
brain work. All great brain workers have been
great sleepers. Sir Walter Scott could never do
with less than ten hours. A fool may want
eight hours, as George Ill. said, but a phi
losopher wants nine. The men who have been
the greatest generals are the men who could sleep
at will. Thus it was with both Wellington and
Napoleon. The greatest speakers in the House
of Commons have been the men who can go to
sleep as much as they like. This explained the
juvenility of the aged Palmerston. There is a
man who has been Attorney General, whom l
have seen bury his face in his hands over his desk
and sleep sOundly until his own cause should
come on. Sleep says the Greek proverb,
g is the medicine for every disease. If he sleep
he will do we'll" \ friend told me that he
treated himself for a fever. He went to bed
with n large pitcher Of lemonade by his side.
lie drank and slept. slept and drank till he drank
and slept himself we'll again. When you take
to your bed get all the sleep you can even
although 20 quote Dick Swiveller's saying, you
have 10 pay for a double bedded room, cOnfessing
that you have taken a most unreasonable amount
Of sleep out of a single bed. You will be bank
ing a whole store of recuperative energy. Even
if you cannot sleep, still keep to your bed.
There is no more p~estilent heresy than that you
should get up directly you are awake. If it is
the early riser who catches the worm, the worm
is a great idiot in rising still earlier in order to
be caught. II you do not get sleep by lying in
bed you get rest. You secure the fallOw ground
which will hereafter produce a good harvest.
Sleep is Of course the proper employment for a
bed, but if you don't sleep you can still lie and
read. 1 don't believe that the man who gets up
really learns or does more than the man who
lies IN bed. If, for n moment, the writer may
be egOtistical, som of the hardest work which
has ever been done from the early dawn till after
a breakfast is in bed. or all sleep in the world
there is none so good as what you get, in the
way OF treasure-trove, after the usual time Of
waking, when, in point of fact, you have given
up the expectation of getting any more sleep.
As for . being called, as the saying goes, that
is simply a relic OF the barbarism of our ances-
tors. L should quarrel with any man who pre-
sumed .'tO call " me. One Of the main beauties
of an occasional day in bed is that you get an
extra stock of sleep, which goes 70 the credit
side Of your sanitary account.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
An Interesting Relic.

At low tide at Monterey, a part of the wreck
of a vessel, formerly the Natalia, can be seen,
though very few who see it are aware that she Is
or was the ship on which Napoleon Donaparte
escaped from Elba sixty-three years ago. to re-
vive his broken power by his immense personal
magnetism, and lose it forever on the memorable
field of Waterloo. The old vessel, now slowly
going to pieces in the Pacific, has a local history.
She brought to California, in 1884. from Mexico,
the colony of Hias, whose members intended to
settle in what was then Sonoma, they returned to
Monterey and gradually dwindled into indistinc-
ton, being typifed by the ship that had trans
ported them thither. 1t is odd, that some enter
prising Snowman like Barnum has not carried off
a portion or the whole of the wreck of the Ma
talIa, and put it into a museum to aid the COM
mon mind in its effort to understand the charac-
ter and genius of the first captain of modern.
or perhaps ancient, times. - Fragments of the
ship in which the great Napoleon escaped from
Elba " would be to the many an allurIng curl
osity and a bit of material history withal.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
A Vigorous ~Pen-Picture.

A writer in the international picture gallery
gives this vigorous portraiture OF Prince Bis
marck a figure suggesting thought of a
medieval man-OfS Sir William Wallace of Wal
~lenstein a huge body, weighing over seventeen
stone, tall, erect, broad-shouldered, vigorous-lim-
bed. inclosed in the uniform Of a Colonel of Prus-
sian Cuirassiers, and surmounted by a heavy
spiked helmet a ~shortish, thick, tenacious neck.
massive jaw, and a heavy mustache, imparting a
military appearance; a countenance full of daunt-
less courage and high resolve bushy eyebrows,
beetling over a pair of gray eyes, looking as IT
they could behold the sun without blinking
eyes calculated to wear fair women and wither
up ~factious men the complexion dull, and of
peculiar paleness. fixed there by sleepless nights
and days of carking care the head erect a
proud incorporating look a human form not
over handsome to the eye, once beheld, can
never be forgotten, full of force and originality,
and colossal will such are the prominent char
acteristics which 60 to make up the outward
bodily presence of the greatest public man in
Europe-tbe inheritor of all that is heroic in
these latter ages-the savior of society by blood
and iron the dragon d~iplomatist, Prince Won
Bismarck Schonhaused, Chancellor of the Ger
man Empire.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
How He "Livened It Up"

There was a compositor not only discharged
from the San jose Herald the other day, but also
fred down four flights of stairs by the Infatuated
foreman of that Journal. 1t seems that a typo
was requested to 4" liven up certain speech
delivered in the town, with the usual marks in
parenthesis. The Jour- who was carrying a
little more beer than was necessary, just then got
hold of the wrong proceedings, causing the elo-
quent resolution of Mr.. Van Arman. referring
to the death OF a member, to read something
like this Whereas, 1t pleased Divine Provi-
dence to remove from our midst our beloved COM
rade Azariah McNluck loud applausel, who has
been cut off in the flower of his usefulness laugh
teri and promise, be it resolved, that we tender
to his family %[cheersl and friends our sincere sym
pathy in their hours of afliction [cries of Put
out. and Order ], and assure them while
we humbly bow to the will Of Heaven, we lament
our departed brother [roars of laughter a fellow
citizen of enlightened mind, statesmanlike views
ferries of Oh shut up = Lets adjourn ! and
broad and generous symptby for his kind. Tier
rife cheers.1 He is not lost but gone before
[derisIve cries and continued laughterl." etc.
In fact, the McMuck widow is hunting for that
unfortunate printer yet, and cherishes the con-
viction that he is still hiding in the hills.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
The Whale.

The Hartford Post discourses about the whale
and his prospects as follows: Unless some new
demand in the arts arises for the production OF
the whale, coming generations will witness a
vast increase in the numbers of that gigantic
antediluvian ocean mammal. The time was
when. within the memory of those who have
barely passed the meridian of life, the products
of the whale fishery were Indispensable to civil
lied needs. All the oil of lubricating machinery
comes from that source. 1t was largely used in
the arts it furnished light in our dwellings :;
spermaeeti in lieu Of wax made less expensive
and almost as eleanly candles the baleen of the
right whale was in great demand for umbrella
ribs, corset bones and many other purposes, and
a product of cetaceous disease formed the basis
Of several very attractive perfumes. Petroleum
and its distIllates have largely superseded whale
oil for fabrication and lighting ~spermaceti has
given place to ~parafne, also a product of petro-
leum whalebone is supplanted by steam and
cellulOid, and lately there has been discovered a
gum in the AmazOnian valley that has the ex-
act OdOriferous quality of ambergris and can be
gathered, exported and sold at much less cost.
So il is not improbable that the whale may be
left comparatively at peace before long, and in
time the sight of one will not be so rare an occur
renee as to form an important item in the journal
of ocean travellers. But the increase will not be
very rapid, as the whale has but one young at a
birth, and the period of CESSATION is believed to
be not less than a year.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18

The Tribune, describing visits of Tenement
House Inspectors to the worst places in Baxter
and other streets, says: The Chinese have taken
possession of South Mott street. 1t is a curious
fact that, while the most debased among the
Irishwomen of this quarter live with brutal Ital-
ians, the younger, best-looking and neater of
them live from choice with Chinese on Mott
street, who it is said treat them kindly, do most
of the homework themselves and make provident
masters. Even basement rooms inhabited by
them smell sweeter than the upper stories where
Italians congregate. In a Chinese restaurant
across the street four Cinnamon were found at
dinner. The ~neatness of the table and the ap-
pearance of the viands would baye done credit to
a second-class American restaurant, at least the
ware was apparently of choice patterns of por-
celain, and the food quails and rice.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
The Panama Canal.

In speaking of the Panama Canal Mr.. Cyrus
W. Field says "Twenty-six years ago l made
a personal examination of that part of il across
which NJ. de Lesseps proposes to cut the canal.
Since there is so much dispute about the locality,
l say that the way to settle it satisfactorily is to
send three engineers down there, one each from
this country. England and France, the best that
can be found. Let them go over the ground
thoroughly and report upon it. The idea is to
select the very best place. and the undertaking is
too expensive to permit of a mistaken selection.
On account of the expense and liability to mis-
take l think that no plan would be feasible
which confined the enterprise to any one nation.
The company must be International. The
United States could not control the canal even If
an American company dug it, because it would
be made through a foreign country. Besides the
enterprise must be an assured success before
money is advanced towards it, and there is no
way so certain of making it so as the co-opera-
ton Of commercial countries. l doubt if $780,
900 900 could be raised in this country alone to
dig the canal. 1t is too much money to be risk
ed without international cooperation"
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18

Mrs. Goodington has been shopping. "The
clerks" she says, " treated me with the outer
most condensation s long s they could git any
thing out O. me but no sooner bad one of them
found out that two yards o. caliker and a hank %
yarn was all | wanted, than he began screaming
out. Cash J afore he d half done 'em up. L
Jest told him that if didn't have a tail two yards
long a dangling to the eend of my gown. and a
bonnit on the tip eend o. my pug. 1 wasn't to be
insulted by a popinjay like him. He looked
cheap enough, l can tell yer, and tried to make
an exploitation. But | guess they don't think
much on him in the shop, for no sooner did
take my puss out o my ridicule than up steps a
raal purity little boy, no bigger n our Steve, and
takes the money right out o the hand of that
sarce-box. "-BOSton Transcript.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
Points in Etiquette.
should never be crossed.

Letters should never be crossed.
Anonymous letters are beneath notice.
Letters of introduction should be brief;
"Yours, &c. is rude ending to a letter.
Never wait over fifteen minutes for a tardy
guest.
Say " Good bye " and not I" Good morning
Upon introduction at once enter into conversa-
ton.
all.
A call should not be more than fifteen minutes
in length.
a note requires as prompt an answer as a spOk-
en- question.
Regrets in reply to invitations should contain
the reasons therefor.
t table you are not required to thank the one
who waits upon you.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18

A friend of mine, coming from New York
lately, was fellow passenger with a man who
never by any chances, except when eating or
sleeping had a cigar out Of his mouth. 81 have
seen a good many smokers" said my friend,
- but | never saw such an incurable~c chimney as
you are" " Yes, can't live without my Havana,
and I've left instructions that one shall be put in
my cOfzn when | die" And" inteTjected
another, " you won't have to 60 far to light it."
This anecdOte being repeated in the presence of
two specimens of the rising female generation,
one evidently enjoyed it, but the other looked
solemn indeed. When they got together out of
the room. she of the serious mind said to her
companion, That was a naughty tale that your
uncle told. 1 know there fare all sorts of nice
things in heaven, but I'm sure there are no cigar
lights there" A right-minded child While
hall Rerieg.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18

Oliver Logan :" heard of a rather amusing
reply given the other evening at a ball by an
American girl in London society. who had strayed
away from the ballroom. Her mother subse-
quently discovered her in a remote nook with a
gentleman. who had bis arm around her waist,
while she rested the tips of her pretty little fingers
on his manly shoulder. Daughter, what's all this ?
exclaimed the irate mamma. The daughter looked
up calmly. and replied Mamma. allow me to
introduce Captain X. to you. l had promised him
a dance. but l was so tired l couldn't keep my
word, and Pm giving him a sitting still waltz
instead"
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18

The Democratic Congress- wants q victory. II it
cannot get that, 10 will thankfully take anything it
Gao get. II is like the oyer-groUn schoolgirl, who
said a Mother can't / get married !" mo"
md her mother, you cannot. Well them" said
The girl, can't L have . piece Of bread with lAsSes on
ft7
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
NOTICE.

a LII INDEBTED TO THE WAL
N LUKU STORE Of I. J. MOSSMAN, are requested to
make immediate payment TO J. H.. HARE, as these accounts
are overdue, and as a certain disposition was made July 23d,
OF the Stock and Bills receivable of said store, and as the said
business is being wound up, all Bills unpaid will have TO be
collected by process OF law. Prompt settlement will save
expense
Augu.t 18th. 1879. aue #
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
NOTICE.

DARE CHANCE FOR
N Wanted by september LIST, Of this year, $4,000 to
$4,000 on first mortgage, on a first class Sugar Plantation,
valued At $500 900.
The crop Of 1880 will be from 1000 TO 1900 tons. Will COM
mence taking of 800 tons in October, 1879. The Plantation has
$50 labOrers, and Is well found in Mules, Carts. &C. Machinery
In FIRST class order. and Can crush seven or eight tons per day.
For further particulars apply to the undersigned,
JUS Al. CARTWRIGHT.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18

BOUGHT FOR Cash.
A fine line of Wool Blankets, worth SIP a pair, selling at SO.
Fine LonsdaIe Cotton worth Is cts, selling at IA cts.
Pride Fruit ofthe Loom Water-Twist Cotton worth Is cts, SELL
ing at IA cts.
Pride Heavy Brown Cotton worth Is cts, selling at 12t cts per
yard.
White sheeting, lO4 wide, selling at So cts per yard.
Brown SheeIing, lO4 wide, selling at 80 cts per yard.
A fine lot of Dress Goods. worth so cts per yard selling at
80 cts.
Fine waterproofs, from IS cts to 81 rs per yard.
A fine line of Turkish Towels, worth SO per doz, selling for 81.
100 Marseires Quilts, worth $40 each, selling at So.
100 Marseilles Quilts, worth SIS each, selling at $3.50.
100 Marseil!es Quilts, worth 81 each, selling at 81.
A nice assortment of Black Velvets and Coiored Silks-great
reduction in prices. Also.
A fine line of Ladies' and Gents Hosiery.
An immense assortment of Men's, Youths and Boys Clothing,
Custom-made, which will be sold at greatly reduced
prices.
Gents Suits from sl2 to $50. Youths Suits from IS to s12.
Boys Suits from 81 so to So.
And also a large assortment of Gents, Youths and Boys Felt
and Straw Hats, and Gents silk Caps and Boys Velvet
Caps.
A very fine line of Ladies' and Chidren's Kid Shoes and Slip
pers-wiII sell them as cheap as they were ever sold be-
fore in this market.
Also a fine assortment of French and American Prints
French Prints sell at l2t cts per yard; American Prints
sell at 10 cts per yard. All these Prints warranted fast
colors, and very nice patterns.
A fine assortment of White and Gray FIanneIs at Low Prices,
and a fine line of CoIored and White Table Damask.
These Goods were selected by S. MAGNIN himself, for
CASH, and will be sold accordingly. The Public will do well to
give him a call, thereby saving money. SEQ
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1879-10-18
A KRAFT & SONS,

- OPTICIA I~
MANUFACTURERS OF JEwELR AND
vi dealers in Watches and Watch Materials. We make the
business of Opticians a speciality. Hotel Street, a few doors
east of Fort Street, near DR.. McGrew's residence, Honolulu,
and 221 Broome Street, New York. my10 6m
The New Orleans daily Democrat. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1877-1880, 1879-03-22
AN AID CApTANDUM CANDIDATE.

Col Bob q. Ia fond Of good story and tells
them well. He is responsible for the follow
ing.
Virginia gentleman Of magnificent aize
though still very young, recently developed
an interest In politics. only equaled by his In
satate desire for fun. A young friend of his
thought Of being candidate for the conven-
tion, but dreaded the opposition Of one of our
most distinguished lawyers, himselfa talked
Of candidate He consulted our stalwart vir-
gina friend, who advised him, by all means,
TO run for the position. cit Is men of bust
ness, not lawyers, we want, and II you follow
my advice you will win. Are you In favor Of
the I'D cdptund,m or the ID pdlorefn tax
II know nothing of either" sid the
young aspirant "My dear sir" said the
joker, "all hangs ON this. The convention
will pivot on 1t, and your success depends on
your selection. ] advise you to go for the I'D
captdntum and put the onts probdndi on your
opponent, who will then be for the I'D udtorem,
In which event you 90 In and your opponent
In left without friend Serious was the face
OF the aspiring candidate. to whom, knowing
no Latin, these terms were IA Greek, and he
consented to run. A benevolent smile irradi-
ated the broad face Of the Virginia gentleman
as the candidate twhO has since been defeatedl
proudly strutted away.
The New Orleans daily Democrat. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1877-1880, 1879-03-22

sorely puzzled by an inquiry Of the kind Ri
on replying, hssftatlngly, "The weissP WV VssE
Is the. weiss2" my friend said In a reprta& +
ful tone, What you have -
among rs for whole week al
building with "Weissbter Alssobank" rss1
cd In hugh black letters ON the facade. H.
we found ourselves In front VI small ootbi1
behind which three individuals were enQss'7
IN uncorking stone bottles AMI carefully I9Ss
Ing their contents Into huge glasses. ~
holding more than half gallon; whlls 1
fourth was removing klppered lampreys lrte,|
a barrel. Right and left lay the weiss I'M
stuben, decorated, like all the beer salotd1s +
Berlin. with plaster busts Of the Enpfs|
the Grown Prince and Furst Won BIsrnsf@]
All the little tables crowding both apartfnaSl
were occupied by guests whose rosy faces M
rotund forms attested familiarity with o.
good things Of this life. Before every n
stood a gigantic tumbler, containing a lio5S
pale and clear as Rhine wine, and stlrrnotak
ed by huge crown Of froth. This was IL
famous weiss The liquor being ortimS
and duly brought we observed that the quld
bottle filled not more than one-third d III
large glass, the yOluminous head OF froth III
only occupying the remaining space, III
foaming over the sides. Hence The neessaIs
for such capaeious tumblers, which uUyi4
is only able 10 raise TO his lips by the III
Of both hands. No 80. however III
experienced weiss bier drinker, who, by loIf
practice, has acquired the knack of balafs
Ing, rs IL were, the bottom Of the glass on ii
outstretched little finger, while he grasps th
side with the remaining fingers and thuna
OF the same hand. A preliminary nip of kun
mel (anise seed is considered de rigsieuy, nd
this disposed OF, the Berllner will drink n
four quarts OF knhle blonde as weiss bisr
POLITICALLY termed by It's admirers as readl,
as his native sand sucks In summer shows
exciting his thirst perhaps once In the oourss
OF the operation by soms sailed delicacy sssA
as q lauDprey. Berlin Ia the city where tAI
kuhle blonde Is obtained In the greatest d.
fection. IL should be drunk when it Ii ii
certain age, be largely impregnated with CT
bonic acid gas, and should have acquired i
peculiar sharp. dry, and by no means d8
agreeable flavor. To the ordinary unstrun1
Berllner a moderate quantity of the weiss
as soda and brandy to the "seedy" English
man. After an evening Of excess his stayl
invariably tend to the weiss bier stube then
TO queuch his thirst with a draught Of kuhll
blonde, and stimulate his palled appetite witl
knoblaueh -wurst, delieacy of the favvftb
sausage type fried with garlic
The New Orleans daily Democrat. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1877-1880, 1879-03-22
THE SAILORS STRIKE.
A weak Demonstration without Resul

vewh WeBbUetFHNtOu WVWBut ExesHttN
The proposed strike Of the sailors has moi
amounted TO much. and In all probability will
accomplish nothing.
Yesterday morning number ofthem Assem-
bied at Jack Smiths place, and headed by q
field band marched around to the different
boarding houses, where they were joined by
others. but the entire crowd did not exceed
seventy-Rve.
They paraded ,ip and down the levee, but
conducted themselves In quiet and orderly
manner, and did not attempt TO impress into
OF any Of their class who were unwilling to
join them None Of those who havea signed
articles of agreement were I'm the ,Srty. az
they well understand that failure tofnomply
with the terms Of the contract signed Nv them
will subject them to arrest and imprisonment,
and the demonstration yesterday wSi made
by those who have not yet received btE hs
After the parade the men marcht& to the
White Hall and organic d meeting. Eleetinp
r.. q. Jones chairman, and John RODGERS sec
rotary. q
The following resolution was unai Snously
adopted; 4
ne X t.nanired That fran md afE,r thia
date, shpmasters and owners be notified
through the daily papers that we demand Of
them, the sum Of twenty-five dollars per
month as wages, and when shipping ali al
vance of forty dollars. binding ourselves not
to ship ON any vessel in port unless our de-
mands are complied with.
The strike comes at bad time TO be at ali
az there IA much larger humber
for. II. is believed that the move was orgi-
mated by some OF the keepers Of sailor
houses, who desire to make them
selves popular with the men.