The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1879-10-08
"Waiter, bottle OF VieuX Macon

"Waiter, bottle OF VleuX Ma'oh-
here!" p. ..-.,:. .}..a1.
ssVieux Macon-yes, sir-some OF 'our
'G9-here you are, sir"
IA minute is supposed to, elapse between
these two sentences.)
.H Hi, waiter, say!' This VieuX Macon
of 'e9 smells Of the cork most abominabiy."
i.' "O6, it can't, SIR 49,. ...a.s..
=" " But it does, sir. Smells OF q musty,
rotten old cork ten years old"
.:Ha, Ina, ha /! Fooled again That Fieux
Macon of go was only bottled half an hour
ago" s. '.. - =, =, = :,
.sI thought so, you internal scoundrel."
(The waiter is covered with shame as with
an apron.) 81. '.:,-+ -. .. -. 81
l. is a thrifty young man, who would
think twice before tying hungry dog to a
post with string OF sausases. g., =
One evening he happened to be visiting
at a house where an anonymous letter had
been received that very morning, and by
way of amusement the members OF the fam
lily took to teasing him, accusing bim OF lis
authorship. IL t,.
lie takes their raiilery in earnest and en-
deavors to defend himself, butthey pretend
not to attach any weight to his denial. Sud-
| denly he seiZes the envelope and cries tri-
umphantly:
s'Do YOU see this stamp? Do you think
| if were going to play trick on you I'd
put postage-stanp Oh the envelope, eh ?
Not muclE" ,et: 81 t.s-'.-r.r> = Eah
He is acquitted without leaving the par.
| Tor. yt.iE - -4/ ~. ~. s.- -.
Once in travelling the Rev. DR.. Bledsoe
was exceedingly ammo, ed by a pedantic
bore. who forced himself upon him, and
| madea great parade OF bis shallow learning.
| The Doctor bore it as tong as he could, and
at length, looking at bin graYely, said
"My friend. you and / know all that is to
| be known" GLOW Is that?", said the man,
pleased with what he thought a very COM
planetary association. "Wby," said the
Doctor, " You know everything except that
you are fool, and know that"
A meteorite sword is novelty. General
Ord, of Texas, sent piece of this celestial
iron and steel mixed to Colonel Bentor, at
the Springfield Armory, to be made into q
weapon. The material was found very
brittle, but all difficulties have been over
come and blade has been finished. On it
is an inscription in Spanish setting forth
that the sword is made from iron fallen
from tue skies OF Mexico, and is presented
to G. Trevino, Mexican general Of division,
by his friend General Ord, U. "A.
Extract from the last act of a new piece;
The Father revealing himself in tears):
The unknown loyer that deserted your
mother-it was L! bly, daughter !!
The Heroine Your -child' bly, father!
The Fathers Son., The child Of my
father My sister!!" -
Tie Fathers Nephew: 1.-THE child of my
unclel My cousin!
The Fathers, Brother: The child Of my
brother My niece!! .os - -
(Tableau-Quick curtain.l -. 49,. J
Let the next spelling. reforln convention
be held in Maine, and adopt measures to re-
form the spelling OF the lakes oil. that State.
Some Of the lakes there only quarter Oh a
mile 10 length have names half mile long
The reformers Nigh ,wFestle with Lake Ma.
gogueku mkt Observation-Disclosures
to beg 10 WITH Norristopn Herald. '.tsH
Old Tom Purde, Sir Walter SCOTS favor
fte attendant, once said as Them are fine
novels OF yours, Sir Walter; they are Just
invaluable to me-" 81 am glad to hear II,
Tom,o returned the novelist. g Yes, SIR"
said Tom; ssfor.when have been out all
day haEdsat work, and come home tired, and
take up one OF your novels, Pm asleep di-
rectly :, \. \; A...sl
The Auburn Advertiser remarks that
the welkin -rings.n or course 1t rings.
Did the .Adyertiser ever know OF a Yeikin
that dsdn y ring z I p. Shy the way, what
g . welkin s--'A barry journal. ~ 80