Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1879-01-23

vene and organize as soon as practicable in
Washington, and limiting its existence to
IS months, was adopted. 1t also describes
the classes of claims to be considered. The
bill as amended by substitute wss then
passed.-Yeas 113, nays 93..".. journed.
The Facts About Sam Snyder.
We were alt.sitting on the piazza in
front of Blyler's store, and Abner Byng
was there, with his legs cooked up
against post and his chair tilted back.
DR.. Murray was running his eye down
column of the country paper, when he
suddenly said:
"Helloa! This is queer! Why, it SAYS
that an English chemist has succeeded in
distilling whiskey from saw-dust.
"That's nothing" said Abner Byng,
Tipping his thumb.
"How do you mean, nothingF asked
the Doctor
ooh, it's old, awful old. l knew
that years ago. Did you ever meet San
Snyder?
"Eo, never met him.
"Wen, Sam was hard drinker-
must have rum by one means or another.
He had no money and nobody to trust
him or treat MIN. So Sam somehow
acsertained that whiskey could be made
out of sawdus., and do you know what
he'd do?"
"What?'
"He'd get 50 drunk off fence-rai]
and a cross cut saw that he couldn't
tell a COW from sugar cured ham.
Put him near to wood pile and saw
buck, and let him alone, and before
IL o'clock he'd turn out the most de-
icious mint julsps you ever tasted.
"Easily done, was it?''
Easily? Why, one time his family
tried to keep him sober by putting him
out on the roof and keeping him there
and do you know what Sam did? Got a
boy to tie wash-boiler and four feet OF
lead pipe to string, and Sam fshed 'em
up, and in three days he had turned
every shingle into cocktails, and he fell
through into the garnet in such a fright.
full condition of intoxication that they
had to give him electric shocks from q
forty-two cell battery to bring him back
to consciousness"
"You know this to be fact, do your
Certainly: I was there. Why, that
man acquired preference for liquor
made from wood, and three times, to my
certain knowledge, he got mania potl
from consumption of distilled pine
boards and potato-mashers, he drank uK
four sets of chair legs; and, one Fourth
of July, when his wife topped his de-
struction of the furniture, he celebrated
the day by calling in three or four friends
to drink new kind of en ergetic brandy
that he'd just made out of a window-sill
and a clothes-prop. Drink! Why, sir, ]
pledge you my word, Snyder in q sing
winter drank up q smoke-bOuse, three
wash-tubs, and q front-door. Nothing
could stop him when he got going"
"Why did he prefer domestic uten-
sils?''
"He didn't. There was a wood out
back of his house that belonged to his
aunt. Sand 20 out there with a meat
saw, or any kind of saw he could get,
and in two years he had stimulated hi
system with eight chestnut trees, foul
persimmons, one oak, fifteen saplings o.
various kinds. Trimmed that grove Out
so that his aunt COUNT rent it to picnic
parties. Nearly broke the old lady''
heart, to0.'
"Did he kill himself drinking?"
"Well, not exactly. I'll tell you
how it was. It seems that he was haunt
ed for long time with the idea that il
he could distill the Presbyterian Church
steeple he could turn out an article
thatd bear q resemblance, somehow, tt
old apple brandy. Queer, wasn't it.
But the man was not exactly right; hi
mind was diseased. So one night he go1
on the roof of the church with ladder
to steal the steeple. When he got there
II dunno how it was, but the idea seem
ed to strike him to taste the thing, maybe
to see if he was right about the flavor,
and-he must have been wild when be
did it-he actually swallowed the
weather-cock, and there he stuck, whirl-
ing around all night as the wind struck
him! Dead? He was deader'n Martin
Van Buren, when they come to take him
down."
"He swallowed the weather cock, did
hep
eyes, sir, swallowed it."
"Well, that wasn't half as hard to swal-
low as your whole yarn" said Blyler.
"You don't doubt my veracity, I
hopeW said Abner. "Y0u do? well, if
you have a quarter about you it will
soothe my wounded feelings. 1 only
want "a"
Just at this juncture Blyler kicked
Mr.. Byng off the porch, and Abner
walked away to the next tavern with q
faint hope that the bartender would give
his credit one more chance.-MQg Ade-
Ter.