The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1879-09-17
THE BRIGHT SIDE.
POLISHED UP BY OUR GOOD HUNDRED
EXCHANGES.

tlonal bird.
One Of the oldest truths nova
days is Sojourner.
The old man Of the sea was an
ocean buoy once.
"A handsome policeman is stun.
ner when dressed up to kill.
We suppose that when q man
t'works like beaver" lie must use
his teeth.
The angels Of the Sunday schools
are sometimes the demons Of the
melon patch.
ga countrymaD seeing the sign,
GLANDS Off innocently asked if they
had gone on picnic.
The funniest river in New Eng.
land is said to be the William antic.
Its jokes are current ones.
Smith thinks that his tailor's
persistent demands ought to be
checked, and so does the tailor.
An exchange superfously vol
untecrs this advice TO politicians:
eff at first YOU don't succeed, lie, lie
again.
Counsel Ito ness)-"You're
n nice sort of q fellow, you are''-
Witness-"Pd say the same Of you,
only I'm on my OATH
Scene: Recitation in Mental
Science. Professor-"How do you
know that you know anythingT-
Senior-"I don't know"
-"You are my precious pearl"
he said, as he drew her to his manly
breast. "Oh, john" she sighed,
"and you are my oyster.
There is no man so poor but
what he can afford to keep one dog,
and l have seen them so poor that
that could afford to keep three.
Mrs. Partington's first cousin
lives up Town. She purchased few
articles of bric-a- brac as Continents"
for her mantelpiece the OTHER day.
No." said Paperwaite, explain
ing, 81 wasn't really mad when the
old man drove me from the house,
but I must say that felt put out"
AN Albany genius calls sus-
pender which has been patented,
"The Conscience Suspender." 1t
owes it's name to it's extreme elias
ticity.
Some Of the fools have gone to
the country, but quite number re-
main in the city and distinguish
themselves by watch chains worn
outside their coats.
Don't dispize yure poor rela-
shuns. They may be taken sudden.
ly ritch sum day, and then it will be
awkward to explain things to them,
undoubtedly SO.
The young man who, wishing to
know the pronunciation of a word,
was advised to consult the authori
ties, interviewed the Mayor, three
Aldermen and the Sheriff.
Youth; Yes, it is curious have
no beard; / can't think who / take
after, my grandfather had splendid
one. Hair Cutter; Oh, perhaps you
take after your grandmother.
-"You'll catch your death of
cold" said friend to a French ac-
tress who started for the seaside late
in the fall. "No shan't; I've had
all my bathing dresses trimmed with
fur, so / shall be nice and comforia-
ble," was her confident response.
FL would box your ears" said a
young lady Of Belfast to her stupid
and tiresome admirer, "if'- IF
what?' he anxiously asked. eff"
she repeated, Il could get box large
enough for the purpose
-"What does 12mo mean?" asked
pupil of her teacher, a few days
since. "19mo? Why, don't you know
what that means? 1t means the same
rs d&weow1y. Havn't you seen it
in advertisements in the newspa-
PERI"
Summer resort visitors are get
ting acquainted with each other, the
young couples just beginning to
"spoon it," when the season draws
to q close. IT'S ever thus. 1t is the
misfortune of youth in love to al
most get therc-and then stop.
"A TALLAHASSEE minister who had
held numerous night meetings in or
der to arouse religious enthusiasm