The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1879-06-19
MULTUM IN PARVO.

MOAA ~ "A AAS = al We
ABUSED patience turns to fury.
TURKEY has splendid land for agri-
cultural purposes.
The cry of the chiropodist-I came,
I saw, / cOrncured.
THERE'S many q cowslip 'twixt the
buttercup and the tulip.-PMck.
The expenses of living are, to u very
great extent, controlled by habit.
To MAKE sure of a big corn crop plant
your feet in tight bOots.-Detrott Free
Press.
The first snake story-The one told
by the serpent to Eve.-Ctncinssati En-
QMirer.
Now IS good time to air your gar-
den beds. Turn with q spade. Detroit
Free Press.
"G1vEN up by the doctors''-All
hope of collecting more than one-third
Of their bills.
The best medicine for sick man is
to back him up against mule. that
animal will heel hun.
MORE people should die on Saturday
than any other day; it's the recognized
end of the weak Philadelphia record.
As A rule, men do not lay their hearts
at the feet of women until they are sure
the things willnot be steppedon.-M q.
Rtcayssne.
MILTON said: "Our country is where
we are well Off" How few OF us news
paper men feel at home.-TMrner' 8
Falls Reporter.
YOUNG housewife: "What miserable
little eggs again! You really must tell
them. Jane, to let the hens sit on them
little longerr'
We should think the conductors wife
would be jealous of her lord. He is al
ways looking after the fares, you know.
-Bostos Transcript.
A BEAUTIFUL custom prevails in
many parts of Europe of planting q
tree upon the birth of every child. 1t
saves wear and tear of slippers.-N. Y.
Telegram.
"WHO was the first manp'' asked q
Sunday-sch00l teacher Of her prodigy.
"Adam." "And who was the first
woman?" He hesltated but moment,
and then shouted, "Madam!'
WHEN the Office seeks the man it does
not find him loafing around the street
corners.-NeW Orleans Rcayune. No,
sir; you are right. 1t found us in our
sanctum waiting for it to come around
and see WhitenaM Times.
We overheard the following CONVEX
satiOn at the Westville blacksmith shop
the other day: Landlord: swell, Mr..
-, have come to the conclusion
that I must raise your rent" Mr.. -:
"Well, I'm glad of it, for I can't raise
itr'-Yale hecord.
A NEW hotel having somehow got
the reputation of being the headquart-
ers for spiritualists, the proprietor pub.
Gshed card saying that no spirits
could be found in the house other than
those usually found at tirstclass no.
tels.-Boston Journal.
An exchange gives directions for ga
good way to build a chimney" but ev-
erybody knows that the best way to
build it is ON . house. A chimney
built in the lower part of the garden,
one hundred feet from the house, would
prove q ridiculous failure. NoTristos0n
Herald.
Our sisters and our cousins and our
aunts can't understand why two boys
when they sleep together enjoy varying
the monotony of talk by wrestling till
the bed is upside down, or pelting each
other with pillows till their strength
gives out. Only the boys can tell
Brooklyn argus.
AN exchange warns farmers against
swindlers in this wise: When strange
man calls at your farmhouse and gets
his dinner. pays for it and wants you
to sign q receipt-just to show his en-
ployers how the money went don't do
it. If you do, in about one month you
will have note for about one hundred
dollars poked at you for payment, with
your own signature to it.
The best way in this season to find
out whether you ought to carry an UNI
brella down town with you in the
morning is to toss up = cent. The re-
suit will be just as reliable as if you
spent half an hour straining your eyes
and getting pains in your neck looking
out Of the window at the sky, and you
will save yourself series of exhausting
mental efforts.-N. 7. M0sl.
A DOWNTOWN man has q mule that
never kicks, can not be induced by oil
the arts of hind-feet tickling to kick; q
small boy can sit with his back against
this mules legs and never get the lift
of a kick; dog can bark at him fol-
seven hours, and he won't kick; in
short, there is no kick in him. P. S.
This paragraph is q faint attempt to
introduce new kindof mule. N. B.
The mule we speak of is dead.-Nesc
Haven Register.
RECENTLY the head of Frank Tolles,
the leader Of q band of highwaymen,
was borne into Cheyenne, WYo. T.,
and exhibited to . jubilant crowd.
When the people had taken q good
look at it, it was buried in prairie in
the outskirts of the town. In passing
over the prairie few evenings ago,
6. p. Clark saw the skull dancing along
and bobbing up and down smong the
cactus bushes. His hair stood on end.
Cold chills struck him. When he
reached Cheyenne he was as white as q
sheet. rybody scoffed at his story;
but . few men were induced to 60 out
and take q look. They, too, saw the
skull fitting hither and thither. The
next morning . large crowd went out
to investigate. There again was the
moving skull. The boldest in the party
approached. All at once little prairie
dog bounded from the skull and shot
- into - h~0 -
propriated the highwayman's head for
. resting-place.
In Connecticut many Of the larges,
factories are employing more men thar
for several years, and some are run.
ming overtime. There il good de-
mand for skilled labor at fair prices
and good steady workmen are notfount
idle