Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1879-09-26
Hawk.EyetemS.

The queen bee always goes with the
swarm. Same way with q thirsty
loafer.
"Strike the iron while it is hot"
And you want to observe the same in.
structions " in regards Of" the waffle.
The French Government is seriously
thinking of abolishing the drum. This
will be glorious news to people whose
neighbors have boys ranging from six
to ten years old.
There are nearly five hundred lady
dentists in America. And they do say
that the feeblest one of the five hun
dred can hurt pretty girls face more
in five minutes than man can in a
week.
An ingenious Iowa chemist has sue
ceeded in celebrating passably sue
cessful imitation egg, and the Disguised
hens Of this State, despairing Of COM
peting with q chemical market, have
gone out of business and are learning
to crow.
The full capacity of the human lungs
is about three hundred and twenty
cubic inches. But all this amounts to
less than nothing when you have just
stuck q vial of ammonia under your
nose, deceived by a misplaced hello
trope label.
Steal unto your country's heart"
writes Grace Greenwood. That's Just
what they're trying to do, Oracle dear,
and great many of them have got as
far as the treasury. Ii the heart can
be sold for anything, it is perfectly
safe to gamble that they will get into
it.
The double-barreled postal card that
will not only 90 but come, as provided
for in the postofice appropriation bill,
is only an iudex of the postal card de-
velopment. When the p. c. reaches
perfection, it will be constructed on the
principle of thousand-mile ticket, to
be used until it is all punched out, and
there will be an annual" postal card
issued for editors.
One establishment in New Haven
manufactured over twenty-five millions
OF fish-hooks last year. And yet, with
official returns in from thirty one States
and only two counties in Florida to
hear from, there have been only Elk
millions of fish and eleven millions of
human thumbs caught this year. The
other five million hooks are sticking
around in submarine logs and bridge
piles.
The Scientific american says that
fancy farming has its advantages"
Well, it has. 1t gives man consider
able insight into finance. When the
city merchant, experimenting with an
eighty" sees brood of thirteen
young turkeys start out in the morning
and deploy themselves all over six
counties before noon, the amateur
farmer has some conception of the
measureless disaster that follows reck-
less expansion, and when he fertilizes,
and ploughs, and harrows, and drains,
and subsoils, and broadcasts, and drills
two hundred and eighty-fve dollars
into three acres of ground and gathers
in one pint of wild raspberries from
the fence corners as his harvest, he I'M
derstands the evils of exaggerated con-
traction. On, yes, fancy farming has
its advantages.
THE MUsHERY.
Ellen McAroon GLOW do you
clean tinware? writes this young lady.
What on earth are you giving us? We
don't clean tinware at all. We don't
do anything but write pretty things.
Mollie McGuire wants to know "what
is the prevailing color in boys stock
ings?" Well, gray slate shade Of a
heavy drab color. with deeper tints of
old brown and leather shades at the
heel and toe.
P. Phelps: All is forgotten and there
is nothing to forgive. You can come
down in the morning without tremOr.
We woald send you token of recon-
ciliation, but somebody got at it last
night and this morning there isn't a
solitary drop in it.
Jabez Thistlepod wants to know if
we can tell him " how to preserve ap-
pies from the worms?" We can. Let
q ten-year. old boy from town have the
run of the orchard three days of the
week. The worms will starve to death
the second day OF the first week.
John Benamy has horse, he writes,
that is going blind, and wants to know
what he shall do with hlmT Well,
sell him to your pastor; he is probably
good trustful man, and you can swim
die him more easily than you could
regularly ordained horse Jockey.
Mrs. Jannaker wants to know 50 what
she shall do with her boys?" It de
ponds o great deal ON tie number of
them and on their ages. But we think
you might roast the eldest, if there
isn't too much of him, and the others
you can make into pemmican and keep
Tor the winter.
Jennie McGilvery says she "cuts her
tomatoes in two, and fries them slowly
on both sides in butter and lard
Well now, Jennie, who under the sun
cares If you do? There your own
tomatoes, aren't they? You have a
right to slice them into and fry them in
lard, or you can sit down on them, or
you can fire them against the end of
your neighbours barn to see them
"bust." We set ours out ON the Gle
tern box FOR about five minutes the
other day, and hungry tramp came
oInnu and 20 <hop, al nm Thio 10 q