The Portland daily press., 1879-12-12
TERMS $500 PER ANNUM, IN ADVANCE.

account for his lack of progeny by saying chat
it was hereditary in his family TO have no
children" Another of his blunders was made
when speaking of the fish-hawkers 'They go
down to Ringsend," he observed, "buy the
herrings for half nothing, and sell them for
twice as much.' A letter supposed to have
been written by Sir Boyle Roche during the
Irish rebellion of 49, gives amusing col
lection of his various blunders. Perhaps he
never put quite so many on paper at time;
but his peculiar tnrn for "bulls" is here shown
at one view. The letter was first printed in
the Kerry Magazine, now out OF print-
DEAR SIR: Having now little peace and
quiet, L sit down to inform you OF the hustle
and confusion we are in from the blood-th1rsty
rebels, many of whom are now, thank God,
killed and dispersed. We are III pretty mess;
can get nothing to eat, and no wine to drink
except whisky. When we sit down to dinner,
we are obliged to keep both hands armed.
While / write this letter / have my sword in
one hand and my pistol in the other. con-
cluded from the beginning that this would be
the end; and l am right, for it is not half over
yet. At present there are sueh going-on that
everything is at stand-still. i should have
answered your letter fortnight ago; but
only received it this morniDg-indeed, hardly
a mail arrives safe without being robbed. No
longer ago than yesterday the mail coach from
Dublin was robbed near this town; the bags
had been very judiciously left behind for fear
of accidents, and, by great good luck, there
was nobody in the coach except two outside
passengers, who had nothing for the thieves to
take. Last Thursday an alarm was given that
gang of rebels in full retreat from Drogheda
were advancing under the French standard;
but had no colors nor any drums except bag
pipes. Immediately every man in the place,
including women and children, ran out TO
meet them. We soon found our force great
deal too little, and were far TOO near to think
of retreating Death was.in every face; and
to it we went. By the time half our party
were killed we began to be all alive. Fortu-
nately the rebels had no guns except pistols,
cutlasses and pixies; and we had plenty OIL
muskets and ammunition. We put them all
to the sword not soul of them escaped except
some that were drowned in an adjoining bog.
In fact, in a short time nothing was heard but
silence. Their uniforms were all ditferent-
chiefly green. After the action was over we
went to rummage their camp. All we found
was few pixies without heads, parcel OF
empty bottles filed with water, and bundle
of blank French commissions, filled up with
Irish names. Troops are now stationed round,
which exactly squares with my ideas OF Sc
curity Adieu; have only time to add that L
am yours in haste. B. H..
P.S. If YOU do not receive this of course it
must have miscarried therefore / beg you
write and let me know
The following is a genuine notice on an irish
church door; ''This is to give notice that no
person is to be buried in this churchyard but
those living in the parish. Those who wish to
be buried are desired to apply to me, Ephraim
Grub, parish Cl6fk. Here Is duObuOl
specimen: 'sNotice.-The church wardens
will hold their quarterly meetings once in six
weeks, instead of half-yearly, as formerly"
In the April of 1906, the following bill was
stuck up: 'This house to be let forever or
longer if required" Such a house would
quite match the gown mentioned by Miss Edge
worth, (which would wear forever, and might
be converted into a petticoat afterward."
Another peculiar garment IS described IN oHe
of LADY Morgan's earlier novels as being COM
posed of can apparent tissue of woven air"