The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1879-08-07
CURING A TELLTALE.
The Trick That u Reverend Gcntlcma,
Played on His Boon Companions.

The Trick That Reverend Gentleman
Played on His Boon Companion.
A late reverend lumnary Of Edinburgh,
an English paper tells us, us famed for
his clarctdrinking powers us for his great
abilities, had IL crony of the name of H.,
with whom he was fond Of spending the
whole night i'll a cornwall tctc-a-tctc
His constant apology to his wife, on re
turning home from these drunken bouts
was that he chad been with that good
holy man, DR.. :" The lady made no
secret to her friends of the excuses into
which her husband was led by the rcvcr-
end gentleman, and the circumstances
coming to the ears of the doctor, he re-
solved to take a pleasant revenge on II.
for the scandal. The next time they
| were seated at tavern, over Il bottle Of
claret, with the intention Of sitting it
out, as usual, the doctor pretended, all Of
4 sudden, 10 recollcct some business of
an official nature, which he must 60
about Immediately.
"Howcvcr," said he, lit won't dctain
me long, SO do you remain here till re-
turn. In the meantime rcplcnish your
glass and stir up the fire."
Away went the doctor-not, however,
about any official business, but directly
to the house of MI II.
IT'S Mr.. II. at homer
"No sir.'
SIS Mrs. H. at homc?''
eyes, sir
"Dr.--'s compliments, and he would
be happy to wait upon her.
The doctor was Immediately ushcrcd
into the presence Of the lady, who received
him with Il degree Of constrained polite.
ness, the meaning OF which he was at no
loss to comprehend
$50, madam" said the doctor, "Mr. H.,
find, is not at homer
ono, doctor; but now that you arc here,
I'll answer for it that he'll be home soon
enough"
"Well, madam" replied the doctor,
affecting not to feel the point Of her oh
servation, ''it is long time since I have
seen Mr.. H., and as want very much to
speak to him about little matter of i'm
portance, I shall wait a littlc.'
From the seriousness with which this
was SAID, the lady began to suspect that
her husband must have been taking some
liberties with the doctors name, in his
drunken apologies, and in Il kindlicr tone,
she invited the doctor to stay to supper,
by which time she trusted and had no
doubt but Mr.. H. would return home.
! Nothing, the doctor said, would give him
more pleasure, for, luckily, he Lad an
hour to spare that night, which, SO many
were his avocations, was but rarely the
case. Supper time came but still no Mr..
II. appeared. His good lady could not
imagine what had become of him; the
doctor suggested a hundred friendly
apologies. The hour of eleven at length
arriving, Halter than which, the doctor
gravcly affirmed, he never stayed from
home, he rose to depart, begging Mrs H.
to inform her husband how anxious he
was to sec him, and how long he had
waited for him.
The doctor now FASTENED back to the
, tavern, made many excuses to II. for lcav-
ing HIM so long alone, and, to make up
for the lost time, piled the bottle so hard
that ere daybrcak he sent the gablcr
home more fuddled than he had ever
parted wit him before.
"Whcrc have you been, you drunk en-
sot?" exclaimed his offended wife.
II. hiccoughed out. lis usual:
"Whcrc- here have I been? Why,
don't you know, my love? With that
good, holy man, DR.. -
80, fic! tic! Mr.. H." rcjoincd the hon
est woman; chow dare you make sic /,
use o that godly mans name? WI you,
indeed? Ma, ma, guide man, nor wi ony
like you. That story'll no do ony LANCER;
I've tand you out at last, sir. The doctor
supped here to night, and has ma seen you
thc-knows whcn."
In vain did H. protest, as intclligibly
as he could, how true he spoke; the lady
knew better than to believe word he
said. Next morning when H. began to
collect his scattered senses, he easily per-
ceivcd the trick which the doctor had
played off upon him; but rather than be-
tray so worthy an associate, he chose to
remain silent. And ever after, instead of
being saluted with ''wherc have you
been, you drunken sot?" his good wife
would bawl out in tone of high deris-
ion, $50, Mr.. H., eoith the doctor, as usu-
al, I suppose"