The Portland daily press., 1879-02-01
The Recent Great French
Duel.
mark Twain in the February Atlantic }

mark Twain in the February Atlantic.)
Much as the modern French duel is ridi-
culed by certain smart people, it is in reality
one OF the most dangerous institutions of our
day. Since it is always fought in the open
air, the combatants are nearly sure to catch
cold. M. Paul de Cassagnac, the most lnvet-
crate of the French duelists, has suffered so
often in this way that he is at last con-
frmed invalid; aud the best physician in Paris
has expressed the opinion that if he goes on
dueling for fifteen or twenty years more
unless he forms the habit of fighting in com
Portable room where damps and draughts
cannot intrude-he will eventually endanger
his life. This ought to moderate the talk of
those people who are so stubborn in maintain
ing that the French duel is the most health
ful of recreations because of the open-ar ex-
ercise it affords. And it ought also to mod
crate the foolish talk about French duelists
and socialist hated monarchs being the only
people who are immortal.
But it is time to get at my subject. As
soon as | heard of the late fiery outbreak be-
tween M. Gambetta and M. Fourtou in the
French assembly, knew that trouble must
follow. knew it because a long personal
friendship with M. Gambetta had revealed to
me the desperate and implacable nature of
the man. Vast as are his physical propor-
blOuss huCW budt tuO tuuSG IOT TtN6U86
would penetrate to the remotest frontiers of
his person.
did not wait for him to call on me, hut
went at once to him. As expected. found
the brave fellow stepped in a profound French
calm. I say French calm, because French
calmness and English calmness have points
of difference. He was moving back and
forth among the debris of his furniture, now
and then stavng chance fragments of it
thn xxy;f1
constant grist of curses through his set teeth
and halting every little while to deposit an
other handful OF his hair on the pile which
he had been building of it on the table.
He threw his arms around my neck, bent
me over his stomach to his breast, kissed me
on both cheeks, hugged me four or five times.
and then placed me in his own arm chair. As
soon as had got well again, we began busi-
ness at once.
I said supposed be would wish me to act
as his second, and he said, "Of course"
said must be allowed to act under French
name, so that might be shielded from oblo-
guy In my country, In case of fatal results.
He WINGED here, probably at the suggestion
that dueling was not regarded with respect
in America. However, he agreed to my re-
quirement. This accounts for the fact that in
all the newspaper reports M. Gambetta's Sec
ond was apparently Frenchman.
First, we drew up the principals will. I
insisted upon this, and stuck to my point. I
said l had never heard OF man in his right
mind going out to fight duel without first
making his will. He said he had never
heard Of man in his right mind doing any,,
thing of the kind. When we had finished the
will, he wished to proceed to choice of his
''ast words" He wanted to know how the
following words, as dying exclamation,
struck me:-
81 die for my God, for my country, for
freedom of speech, for progress, and the uni
versal brotherhood of manp'
objected that this weuld require too lin
gering death: it was good speech for a
consumptive, but not suited to the exigencies
of the field of honor. We wrangled over a
good many ante-mortem outbursts, but f.
naly got him to cut his obituary down to this,
which he copied into his memorandum book,
purposing to get it by heart:-
81 DIE THAT FRANCE MAY LIVE"
said that this remark seemed to lack rele-
vancy; but he said relevancy was matter of
no consequence in last words-what you
wanted was thrill.
TIE next thing in order was the choice OF
weapons. My principal said he was not feel
ingewell, and would leave that and the other
details of the proposed meeting to me. There
fore wrote the following note and carried it
to NJ. Fourtou's friend:-
Sir: M. Gambefta accepts NJ. F0urtous Chal
lenge and autohrizes me to propose Pessis Pquet
the place of meeting; Tomorrow morning at day
break as the ii ne; and axes as the weap ms. am,
sir, with great respect. MARK TWAIN.
M. Fourtou's friend read this note, and
shuddered. Then he turned to me- and sad
with suggestion of severity in his tone:-
"Have you considered sir, what would be
the inevitable result of such a meeting as
this?'
'Well, for instance, what oould it be?"
sBoodshedr'
"That's about the size of it," I said. "Now
lit is fair question, Whit was your side
proposing to shed?"
had him, there. He saw he had made a
blunder, so he hastened to explain it away.
He said he had spoken jestingly. Then he
added that he and his principal would enjoy
axes, and indeed prefer them, but such weap
ons were barred by the French code, and so
I must change my proposal.
walked the floor, turning the thing over
in nav mind, and finally it occurred to me
that Calling guns at fifteen PAGES would be a
likely way to get verdict on the field of hon.
or. So framed this idea into proposition.
But it was not accepted. The code was in
the way again. I proposed rifles; then,
double-barrelled shot-guns; then. Colts navy
revolvers. These being all rejected, re-
fected awhile, and sarcastcaliy suggested
brickbats at three-quarters of a mile. I al
ways hate to fool away humorous thing on
person who has no perception of humor
and it filled me with bitterness when this
man went soberly away to submit the last
proposition to his principal.
He came back presently, and said his prin-
cipal was charmed with the idea of brickbats
at three quarters of mile, but must decline
on account Of the danger to dsinterested par
ties passing between. Then 1 said,-
swell, I am at the end of my string, now.
Perhaps you would be kind enough to sug-
gest weapon? Perhaps you have even had
one in your mind all the time?"
Bis countenance frightened, and he said
with alacrity,-
So he fell to hunting in his ockets,-pocket
after pocket, and he had plenty of them,-
mutteriDg all the while, snow, what could 1
have done with them?'
At last he was successful. He fished out
of his vest pocket couple of little things
which carried to the light and discovered to
be pistols. They were single-barreled and
slveE-mounted. and very dainty and pretty
was net able to speak for emotion. 1 ST.
leDtly hung one of them on my watch chain,
and returned the other. My companion in
crime now unrolled postage stamp contain
ing several cartridges, and gave me one of
them. 1 asked if he meant to signify by this
that our men were to be allowed but one
shot apiece. He replied that the French
code permitted no more. then begged him
to 90 on aud suggest distance, for my mind
was growing weak and confused under the
strain which had been put upon it. He
named sxty-fve yards. nearly lost my pa
tience. said,-
"Sixty-fve yards, with these instruments?
Pop guns would be deadlier at fifty. Consid-
er, my friend, you and are banded together
to destroy life, not make it eternal"
Bot with ali my persuasons, all my argu-
ments, was only able to get him to reduce
the distance to thirty-fve yards: and even
this concession he made with reluctance. and
said With sigh,--
"I wash ny hands OF this slaughter: on
your head be it."
There was nothing for me to do but to 90
home to my old lion-heart and tell my humil-
iating story. When entered NJ Gambetta
was laying his last lock of hair upon the al
tar. He sprang towards me, exclaiming,-
"You have made the fatal arrangements -
I see 1t in your eyep'
81 have"
His face paled trife, and he leaned upon
the table for support. He breathed thick and
heavily for moment or two, so tumultuous