Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1879-06-25

''iNh' W iiaNS u MN Ntlk bNlk Oh Tue
plaster and lei n chrome of Washing
ton crossing the Delaware down on
their heads.
a woman who can write a letter with
out two-thirds Of her tongue prolruding
through her mouth, is fitted for a better
sphere than this.
Tramps would be more numerous
than ever were 1t not for the selfsacri-
hclng women of the land who marry
and support SO many men.
We should like to kiss the sweet little
creature who said that fire flies were
made 10y God to "yite re little froggies
to bed, Ii she Is seventeen years old
bring her around all the same.
The young man who works hard
saves his money, and gets his hair
shaved short, is preparing for marriage.
Claude De Haven is now manager of
the "double-headed girl" This position
is no sinocure. A one.headed girl is
more than some men can manage.
"Well, you'll own she's got a pretty
foot, won't your "Yes, III grant you
that, but then in never made half rs
much OF an impression on me rs the
old mans.
Uncle Jumbo was caught with n
stolen chicken hid in his hat, and when
asked how it came there he replied:
Fore de Lord, boss, dat fowl must n
crawled up my brecches leg"
No comedian can make AS laughable
a face as that made 10y the small boy,
when he brings II Jelly jar down from
the closet shelf and discovers 1T to be
full Of ten penny nails.
There's a good lea of human nature
about Strawberries. The big fellows
naturally tramplet on the little ones,and
as n consequence are always seen at the
top of the box.
A man with a pair Of creaky boots
always has music in his sole, and he
generally executes a solo Just mt the
very moment when the rest Of the con-
gregation have settled down to a quiet
nap.
"Ma, lend me a pencil, | want to
draw some ladies'" Draw some ladies!
Why, Johnny this is Sunday" well,
I'll draw them in their Sunday clothes"
Proposition declined with spanks.
A waiter was told by n countryman
to bring something OF what he had"
The waiter brought him a regular din
ner upon small dishes, as the usual
form, and set them around his plate.
The countryman surveyed them care
fully u moment, and her broke out:
"Well, ! like your samples; now bring
on your dinnerl"
He looked up very humbly, and said
he IA sorry to be found in such a
place, but he could assure the court that
he was never in the prisoners box be-
fore. "Never?' asked the court, with
some severity. Look a here, Judge"
said the culprit, name the fine, but
for heavens sake don't spring that
'Pinafore' gag on a fellowI'
" is said hal the woman who hest
tates is lost. This is not always SO, low
ever. Quite frequently it is the other
woman who is coming right back Of
her and doesn't see her stop to pick up
her dress. Ia IN instance last Sunday,
on Main street, the woman who
ran against the other was thrown, and
in falling SPLIT a breadth in her own silk
with her own sunshade Ladies in
pausing to get the proper hold Of their
skirts should ring "A bell or step out into
the roadway -Ddnbury New8.
Everything, says the Norristown Her
old, is about two weeks late this spring.
Even the sea serpent which regularly
makes it debut at the watering places
about this time OF the year, has not yet
appeared. We cannot decide which
seaside resort TO honor with our pres
ence until we know At which one the
sea serpcnt is going to board.
ave heard a sou of Erin" says the
Council Bluffs Ia Globe, trying to sur
round Mary and her lamb the other
day, and this is the way he understood it:
"Begorry Mary had a little shape,
And the wool wss white entoirely,
An wherever Mary would stir her stumps.
The young shape would follow her comilatelY."
Evening softiy closes
On their hinges gay
Myriais or roses.
While George ice cream proposes
To Maud, and she saith yes"
Evening softly closes.
The daifodillf dozes
Upon the boulder grey
Mid myrlads Of roses.
While her father shouts, "Oh, Moses"
And boOteth George away.
Evening softly closes
Myriads of roses.
Astride a log sat Sum and another
sinner, engaged in Il little game Of
seven-up, when a minister approached,
who, after a solemn contemplation OF
the game, laid his hand upon Samuels
shoulder and said: my friend, is that
the way to ave your soul?' perhaps
not" answered Sam, who, having just