Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1879-08-21
VT uJ1d Hlh7noy:.
Anybody can lick Il postage stamp.

,f Anybody can lick postage stamp.
v Ought baker to drive thorough bred
). horse?
Y Why is hen crossing the road Ike
!, murder: Il is 4 fowl proceeding.
: Why is baltl-heated nan like IA hunt
d great way.
S No one ever tl.or;g', : r.,''.-- an ..r
= l"rt t"' n lfr'n. o. ,a, .r,.'."G, I'd.
:, ln" '... ,..,t. i ...-.-
'I,;c rs4l>"ii ,th.} l-a..,, t.a'. ~s.e. -
cline', 10 n, !,e ronIl io. rs ~. B. ) be-
cause it w;.s u caih-ancle.
Nothing viii more reHiin;' q man Of the
valHe of little things than plate of straw
berries at Il church festival.
If every ole Who's played the fool
Had died and TUNED TO clay.
Ho" many people would be lefe
Alive and well to-day?
! 1t is now said by a scientific authority
that sleep commences in the feet and ex-
tends to the head. Possibly tile custom
of sitting with the feet toward the t:fpit
may have something to do with it.
He entered the grocery store, said not a
word. but allowed his cane to swing to and
fro exactly rs the pendulum of clock,
TIE grocer only said. No; we sell no.
| thing on tick" and the man with the cane
passed sadly and silently out.
| One Sabbath afternoon worthy min-
lister. observing by the time he had reached
the third head Of his discourse the drOw-
sy disposition of several of his hearers,
quietly remarked: I'm the third place.
those of you who are awake will notice."
etc.
After an enthusiastic lover spends two
hours hard labor over letter to his girl,
and then mars its beauty by spiling drop
OF ink on it. re first sWearS ~ very scen-
ti:ic manner for a few moments and then
draws crcle around tie blot and tells her
it is kiss.
Prisoner at the BAR" san! .a,. Judge.
lis there ANYTHING you wish to say before
sentence is passed upon you?" TIE pris-
oner looked wsifliy towards the door.
an remarked that he would like to say
"good evening" il it would be agreeable
TO the compai!y.
A certain resident of North Aderfns re-
Gently buried his wife, wgrnan of unusual
size. and few days after the sad event a
neighbor attempted little in the censola-
ton line by rs;narking, "Well, MIR. -;
yon have met with heavy loss" YES"
replied the niourner. with sigh, ''she
weighed most tonr hundred pounds!''
1t is pretty hard to throw Off old habits
all at once. A Nebraska dealer in agricul-
tural Implements got religion" felt it his
luty to point out the way to others, and
said to & farmer: Brother Jones. will
guarantee that if you join our church you
will not only find it the best in the market.
but it will take ~ou straight through with
put any further inventory. Give it a trial,
md if not satisfactory | will take back
your religion and refund your money
Detroit Free Press.
''What are you doing. Rutherford?'
asked Mrs. Hayes. the other morning be-
ore breakfast, when she entered the Pres
dents library and found him writing rap
dly. and Il huge pile of manuscript in
'roat Of him. Why" replied Mr.. Hayes
without looking up. Il am preparing veto
No. s." Veto No. -" echoed Mrs.
i yes. why Congress has adjourned"
believe tlat is 90" returned his excel
ency. i.bh:n@ his ren into the ink, but Z
'eto nessa.se VII io Haa1y 10 hayc i'll the
house in ;,se OF m emergency"
At Il 50 Eiiern ranp"aost,1g. Acli manv
ears ago. were tyc ministers who were
mutually antagonis,ic One of them.
Brother Davis, had Il wooden leg. and,
silen he was esNeri Nv rorgh' w. woultt
npbJS'2" q @ry WORT ny .aaHnlHg it o..
h -.- Dt"lu- Jr" n t.ll oessio-
t 80, ... '-f:."-'iu nea t4e laso-.
an' Vas t.oN,leG. nj 3rother Davis W.,
with Ill .Ie enr!ry in his pow
+. Brother Jones Appeared with a gold
eaded cane. Pointing his long. bony
niger ut Li.i, Brother Davis exclaimed:
Brother Jones. there'll be no gokl-headed
mes in heaven ~ NO. said Brother
oncs. angered by tile sudden attack.
and no wooden-leggel preachers there,
ther."