The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1879-07-27

the positive. the comparative and the superative
duty of inan:-'Get on; get honor; keep honest. ="
Wit oftentimes finds a similarity where plain COM
mon sense only sees difference. Some one has
asked. what is the difference between ulster and
baby?" A Scotchman into whose brain joke
enters except by the help of surgical opera
ton. would reply perhaps, that the two things are
not in any way to be compared; but the rest of us
sec plainly enough that the one wear and the
| other was.
| One of the most beautiful compliments to woman
was that paid to Lady Elizabeth Hastings by
Sir Richard Steele. He said of her. "rhough her
mien carries much more invitation than command
to behold her is an immediate check to loose be-
havior, and to love her is = liberal education"
The ability and. may add. the willingness, to
find something to praise rather than something 10
blame. is OF the chief characteristics OF true
greatness. The real difference between man OF
resources and weak man is that the latter cannot
be comfortable anywhere. while the former VIII
make himself comfortable everywhere. Mrs. jane
son has discovered beautiful epilogue which illus
trates this point. At the of the street. in an
eastern city. lay dead dog. with halter about his
neck. MOI disgusting unclean thing perhaps
met the eyes OF man. crowd led by idle
curiosity, had gathered and were making comments.
''Faugh' said one, with gesture of great impa-
tience 'it pollutes the air. and another said. with
the air of one who had received personal injury,
How long will the authorities allow this vile beast
to offend sight?" Still another said, looking at
the dogs torn hide. "One could not cut shoe
out itp '.well, well" said a fourth. she has
doubleday got his deserts at last and hanged for
thieving." AT last q mild voice, filled with pity,
said in quiet tones, "Pearis are not equal to the
whiteness of his teeth" 1t really the only good
or kind thing that could be said and he alone had
IN Mo vd f,,rr ad md 20 1oot
the speaker. and some whispered under his
breath, at must be Jesus of Nazareth"
In searching for a wife look only at the feet for
does not the old adage tell that "Als we'll that
ends well?'
Some forty years ago the programme of of
the concerts of the Norwich Musical Festival con-
tanned the following list Of pieces and of singers
it hardly be considered overloaded regards
punctuation :-"Comfort ye Mr.. Hobbs, But who
may abide Mr.. Balfe, Behold virgin Mr. Young,
Behold darkness shall Mr.. Phillips, Rejoice,
greatly Miss Birch, He shall feed Miss Haws, Come
unto me Madame Stockhausen.'.
fashionable woman. suffering from q complica-
ton Of disorders. recently sought the advice of
eminent New York physician. Having related her
symptoms, which were of character to cause seri-
alarm. she surprised to hear him say simply.
LET me look at your shoes" On seeing them he
added, II cannot treat patient who wears shoes
with such heels as those"-and politely bowed her
out.
The French subject has at last been clothed with
his full rights. He is able to indulge. like the
people Of all other Christian nations in tho luxury
of divorce The example of the United States has
proved too much for the French Republic, and
neighbors the water determined not to be
deprived of any Of the privileges OF the most ad-
vanced people OF the age The history of this mat
ter is most curious. In 1892 bill was passed which
made it easy for man and wife to separate. The
domestic condition OF France such that it
seemed likely that nearly every family would have
to be reconstructed. In 1897 less than twenty
seven thousand divorces obtained. Then more
stringent laws enacted. and they have remained
in force until France is a happier country
than ever before and safely be trusted in
this direction. How many will avail themselves of
this partly open door drop the chains of conjuga
bondage and go out into the great domestic mo
where cannot say. So far at
glance, though the word "home" does not exist in
the French language. the thing which La indicated
by the word is to be found in Franco truly in
any other quarter of the globe.
An Englishmans idea of American w.t. though it
has undergone revolution in the last few years,
still very peculiar. 1t is his delight to quote the
following good example of what we laugh at in
this country. and it is certainly very funny when
and properly sprinkled with the "you know" with
out which the average Englishman cannot carry on
a conversation lie laughs at the subtety Of Punch.
and most of the wit of Punch is very subtle that
it evaporates before it reaches this side of the At
lantic but he says good naturally that this story
very humorous. you know, and thoroughly Ameri-
can. by Jovel "a party of settlers you know,
met out on the praries, or somewhere else in your
fearfully big country. 1 don't exactly remember
where, by one of our club men. you know. While
in conversation of them said to him, we
don't take anybody with US. don't you see, unless he
is useful for might get into x with the Indians.
you know. and that would be very annoying Now.
them this man., pointing to stout fellow, is our
carpenter. and this one. pointing to another. lis
our baker, and that one is our shoemaker Just
then the Londoper saw an old man. you know, and
thinking to catch the Yankee, he sad Well. there's
an old man. you don't mean to tell me that you
can make any use of himY oh. yes can.
piled the Yankee, we shall need him right OF; we
expect to start cemetery with him."
The doctrine of election and foreknowledge abso-
lutte pretty clearly fixed in the mind of the old
Scotch preacher who said to his people one day,
eye Gamma be guide, an If ye guide, it wad do ye
m GUIDE"