The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1879-12-29
ALL SORTS.
God bless the little stockings
All over the land Tonight.
Hung In the choicest corners
In the glow of crimson lfghtl
The tiny scarlet stocking,
With hole In the heel and toe,
Worn by wonderful journeys
The darlfnga hone To go.

With hole in the heel and toe,
Worn BY wonderful journeys
The darlings hope TO go.
1t the streets OF heaven are paved with
gold it must also be remembered that gold
has no commercial value up there. You
might as well have bag of sawdust as q
cart load of gold.-Detroit Free Press.
1t is taking mean advantage of a girl
to propose night or two before Christ
mas. She has either to say yes or lose the
opportunity of receiving Christmas pres
ent, Philadelphia Chronicle.
To the press of the United States: If
you have any regard for decency. and any
respect for the Almighty, why don't you
put stop to this indecent literature OF
Courtney Hanlan. GoscdndG Enterprise.
There is only one thing which could
render the average railway waiting room
more attractive than it is, that is the pair
OF boots worn by the last switchman who
was ground up.-Detroit Free Press.
Pa said bright boy the other day,
what is wine made OFF" And the foolish
man. without thinking said, 'Grapes."
The amount of thoughtlessness and ignor-
ance 10 this world is greater than one
would believe. Burlington Ha,okeye.
Did you ever notice the fact-of course
you have-that the tramp who claims he
has trade but can get no work at it, 10
| winter is brickmaker and in summer a
lumberman or ice awyer?-Lockport
| Union.
Intoxication resulteth from rum. Cut
| off the cause; pardon the effect. N. B.
This reasoning applies to rum alone.
Only heather logIcian would suggest
extending it to SANDER. or violence, OF
anything else.-PGck.
When decrepit and palsied old man OF
| 80 years, with one foot in the grave and
the other pointing toward the under
| takers, places his hand on the head of one
| of the sons of the late Mormon prophet be
we'll. he feels Young, doesn't he-NOr-
ristO,Un Herald.
The women of Boston turned out and
voted man-fashion at the recent election.
They were delighted to be able to defeat
every woman that was nominated. And
how sweetly a woman can smile on the
sister she has just deposited vote to de-
feat. Turner'S Falls Reporter,
The lower jaw of human being, said
to have belonged to the primitive race
has been dug up on the banks of Lynx
Greek. in Arizona. The jaw never had
| more than SIX teeth, and from it's confor-
nation the possessor subsisted wholly Con
fruits and grass. -Erchdnge,
And how is your neighbor, Mrs
Brown" inquired one nicely dressed lady
of another. She's we'll enough. | sup
pose. | haven't seen her to speak TO her
for six weeks" Why, tho, ut you two
| were on the most friendly terms.
w ell we used to be; but we've exchanged
| servants.
| The bumhIebee, it is said, gives two
very distinct sounds. And we, therefore
| advise all our readers to discourage al
advances on the part of this insect. There
is none like him, though be humble bee
The honest wasp, and others in the
singing business, are content with one
sound. but that sound strikes the carmlne
springs every time-BoSton Transcript
| When a life insurance agent comes in
and tells US that only last week a man in.
sured with him for $50, 900 and paid one
premium, and to day ne is dead and hi
family has the money, it doesn't make us
any more anxious to insure, though il
may be convincing argument in favor
of the beauties of the system, Boston
| Post.