Louisiana capitolian., 1879-11-01

social customs was asked the meaning of
casting an old shoe after u uewly-mar-
ried couple as they start on their trip.
lie said: "To indicate that the chances
of niatrimony are Slippery
A member of a congressional investl-
eating committee recently said: ITS
no use trying to get at the truth with re-
gard to political quarrel, for tho wit
ness,s ON both sides would rather lie ut
siyty days than tell the truth for cash"
A gentleman was promenad'ng the
street with bright little boy Mt his side,
when the little fellow cried out Oh !pa,
there goes an editor! Hush, hush f" salh
the father. "don't make sport OF the poor
mau-God only knows what you may
come to yet"
Scientific men now say that mems
brains are made from the white OF egg.
The announcement was made only TWO
weeks ago and eggs have gone right up
I,rre invoices have been forwarded to
Washington, and hens arc assuming more
Mrs than an amateur pedestrian.
A marriage has.bee declared null IN
New York because the young man swore
he was drunk when the ceremony was
performed. The woman in the case very
sensibly declined to make any defense,
evidently believing that the young man
wae not worth cOntcnding for.
Coming back from little trip to Havre
n Parisan thus bewailed his mlsfort'incs
to a railway companion: cone thing IS
certain, you won't catch me on any more
of these excursions. l have lost my wife
and nv cane" And then he added, with
tears in his eyes, "and it was u new cane,
toow
A country editorin Michigan thus bids
farewell TO his readers, his newspaper
havincexpircd: "Good-bye. Tolltte bell
gently. This is our last kick. Handle
MS with care. Lower us gently to rest.
We die u natural death. The VOLTS at
our door. Bury us under q roscbusll
Listen to the mocking Bird
If Beast Butler were IN inscriptions
politician, there would be wcll-tillct
bar'l rolled into the political field of thu
Bay State. But the Generals friends
feel confident that he would prefer hon
orable defeat to an election secured b,
any other means than the honost, vol
nntary suilragrs of his fellow-citizcns!
"My boy" said solemn-visage'
evangelist to boy who had jus
emerged from hair-pulling match wit
another boy, edo you expect to rov
hereafter in y land of pure delight 7
"No." said the lad 'Tvc bursted al
other button olt'n my trousers, and | On
poets to get licked for it.'
A rule Of the Illinois Central Railwa
provides that dogs shall not ride i'll
passenger car but u big aud fcrocior
bulldog walked into car at Chicago
appropriated whole seat, and rode 81
miles unmolcstcd. ''IIe had such
meaning smile" was the conductor
apology for not ciccting lim.
To read the comments of the Radio
press on the October elections, one Won
suppose that party had swept kcntuck
Missouri and Maryland, instead OF ca
rying Iowa and Ohio-one a Republic:
stronghold and the other generally X
publican. The amount of boasting pc
formed is greatly disproportioncd to t
results achieved. But it is essential
Republican to boast!
The minister asked the Sunday schc
"With what remarkable weapon d
Sampson at one time slay a number
Phillistnes ?, For awhile there was
answer. and the minister, to assist t
children a little, commenced tapping
Jaw with the tip of his finger, at the sal
time saying; whats this! whatsthis
Quick as thoughts little fellow inncce'
ly replied "The jaw bone of an ass, sl
A young man about to enter cole
asked a student to tell him some comp
mentary phrase in Latin that he cor
repeat to the professor when he should
introduced. The friend complied.
meeting the professor he said: "Ahc'
Ego sum stultus" U am fool.) 1
professor merely opened his eyes trl
wider and gravely said: eyes, sir; a
well aware of the fact,