The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1879-06-06
WORKING HARD AT NOTHING.
A Boys Troubles.

II ASOJ AHOuOACS
j He is not naturally lazy, but he never
gets anything done. Other boys who are
not half so industrious make a better
show and get more credit for what they
do His intentions are good. Now, fol-
instance, he sets resolutions Sunday af
ternoon. He is going to make things
fairly buzz about the place Monday morn.
ing. He Is only sixteen, but he will soon
be man, and he is going to turn over a
new leaf now. He was so fun of resolu.
tions Sunday evening that Monday morn
ing he can not recOllect where he pulled
OF his boots. His left boot is gone, and he
resurrects the whole house before he
finds it covered up under his Sunday
clothes in his bed room. After break.
fast each member is interviewed, and in
their turn blamed, for the disappearance
of his everyday hat. He finally walks off
on his ear, declaring that he can do
without a hat. He reaches the hay-mow
with the intention of feeding thehorses.
He steps on something in the hay which
proves to be his hat, half full of eggs
which he had intended to take to the
house Saturday evening. 1t takes him
half an hour to get his hat in condition
to wear and the unchanged eggs so they
will not attract attention in the kitchen.
AS he Is leading the horses to water his
father, who is just starting down town,
calls back at him not to forget to feed
the hogs. He ties the horses to a post
| and goes at once to fill the orders for
fear he will forget it. The feed basket
is thing of the past-lt is not in the
crib, barn or cellar, or any place else
AT least forty minutes search fails to de-
velop it. AT last, as he is exploring a
dark corner of the barn, his shins come
in sudden contact with the handle of the
wheelbarrow, and after consoling the of.
Tended members, he concludes the wheel
barrow will do as we'll as the basket. He
takes it to the crib, and after loading the
grain, starts for the hog pen. He has
not gone far before the wheel of the Irish
chaise runs over the rake lying in the
grass, and causes the handle to fly up
and attact his knuckles in such a vicious
manner that he loses his grip, and the
machine keels over, spilling the corn.
He is somewhat discouraged, but goes to
work picking up the wreck. When this
is accomplished, he is determined to put
the rake away before any of the children
falls down on it. He starts to the work
shop, and he is passing the well a con-
Stunning thirst comes over him, and he lays
the rake down to take a supply of water
just as he is STOPPING to pick up the
rake, his mother calls him to empty the
slop-pail. He sees chance to make one
trip TO the hog-pen do. He has some
trouble in making the pail balance on
the load of corn, and when he has sue
ceeded he is obliged to travel so slow
that before he has gone thirty feet the
hired girl runs out of fuel, and he is COM
PEELED to saw some stOve-wood before he
does anything else. He saws one stick
half of, and then DISCOVERIES that he will
have to sharpen the saw before he can
do anything with it. He takes it into
the shop, and spends thirty minutes get
ting it to pieces, before the bitter fact
that he does not know where the file is
stares him in the face. He rumages over
everything in the shop. He turns every
thing upside down in the house. The
meal seive, three tin pans and the roll
ing pin falls down on him from the top
shelf OF the cupboard, before he recol-
lects of leaving the file sticking in GER
tain fence post. He rushes off after it,
but when he secures it the handle is
gone, and he is compelled to make a
new one. When he has finished this ag
gravating job, the file itself has mystic
riously disappeared. After twenty-five
minutes search, he leans against the
work bench utterly discouraged. AS he
rams his hands in his pockets one of his
fingers is perforated by the sharp end of
the file. His courage again looms up,
and he proceeds to file six teeth, when
his young sister arrives with the market
basket and a verbal order for him to dig
potatoes for dinner, and to hurry up.
The present home of the hoe is mystic
ry. After twenty minutes search and
reflection, he remembers having loaned
it to Dick Smith to dig fish-bait Satur-
day, and he hasn't any idea where he left
it. While he was hunting for the hoe
he saw the spade somewhere, hut he can
not recOllect now where it was. The
hired girl wants to know if he is ever go
ing to get that wood. He sets the bas-
ket down and hurries back to the shop
and files seven teeth, when one of the
neighbor boys drops in to borrow his
fish-line. He has no trouble in finding
the line, but it takes fifteen minutes to
persuade the hook to part company with
Again he attacts the saw, but before he
can finish it, the hired girl makes such
a pressing requisitiOn for wood that he
is forced to give up the job for the pres
ent. When he attempts to put the saw
together, he cannot find one of the
screws, and he Is so disguised that he
abaldons the blame thing, and hunts up
the axe to settle the wood business. He is
chopplng for dear life, when he is scared
out of his wits by fearful racket near
the barn. He left the wheelbarrow lit
tie too near the horse, and the poor crea-
ture becoming tired of stake of oats
and not understanding the disposition of
the one wheeled concern in trying to
coax it little nearer with his fore foot
had caused it to suddenly dish out every
thing it contained under his feet, and the
poor animal being frightened at such
sudden and unexpected generosity, had
reared back. The halter gave way and
he had unconsciously sat down in a
chicken coop, totally wrecking the happy
meditations of the two motherly old
hens.
While our hero is doing his best to
straighten up the wreck, one of the chill
dren falls off of the well curb on to the
rake. His father comes home for an
early dinner. His mother comes out af-
ter the potatoes, and the hired girl is ua.
scrupplQus in accounting for the melan-
chOly condition of the bread. He is to
blame for everything, and he does not
think his services are properly appreci-
ated. For the life of him he cannot
see how he could do any more than he