Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1879-02-07

Nevada papers, instead of speaking
of a deceased citizen as being widely
and favorably known, remark: There
wasn't a saloon-keeper i'll the State who
didn't ache to trust him."
A subscriber wrote to a journal to
make some inquiries about the next
worlds fair, Whereupon the wicked
editor replied that he was under the
impression that the next world wouldn't
have any fair.
A man was taking aim at hawk that
was perched on tree near his chicken
coop, when his little daughter exclaimed
Don't take aim, pa let it 60 off by
accidentp "Why soF' asked her
father. cause every gun that goes of
by accident always hits somebody
Two persons, neither of whom bears
| any striking resemblance to any great
iurist except for corpulency, were COM
| fortably seated talking over matters and
things, when one said, 81 once sat on the
Judges bench in Texas" ''That SOP
asked his friend. "Where 1DGs the Judge :"
A little boy, on returning home from
| church, was asked by his mother to give
| the text. After thoughtful pause, the
| little fellow replied: 'I don't hardly re-
member, but it was something about
hawk between two pigeons" The text
was, "Why halt ye between two
opinionsT
A Cockney inquired at the pOst-ofice
for a letter for Emery HOgden." He
was told there was none. Look ere"
he replied little angTily, you've hex
amined an hodd letter for my name. 1t
don't commence with a haitch. 1t
begins with no. Look in the 'ole that's
zot the hos"
Every now and then some cnap writes
to newspaper for a recipe to prevent
hair from coming out. If men would
90 home from the Lodge before midnight,
With their legs sober, their hair wouldn't
come out so rapidly. We always go
homs early, and we have more hair now
than the day We were born.
"Ah! we were looking for you" he
said, as he approached. Edith, dear,
this, is the friend told you of. Miss
Handbook, allow me to present my wife"
Jessie Handbook grew white to the
very lips at that word. The room
whirled, she reeled and would have
fallen had he not caught her in his arms.
"The heat has overcome you" he said,
aloud. But he knew better; for, bend
ing close, he whispered in her ear,
"Greek meets Greek"
Throughout the whole of the Turkish
dominions there are estimated to be
only 100,0 100000 horses, while the Russian
provinces are credited with the posses
sion of no fewer than q, $4,000. Aus
tro-Hungary has about 3,5O0,OOO, and
Germany 1852, 900. France, which had
considerably more than 100000 a few
years ago, has now rather less than that
number, and England stands only fourth
on the list, with 2,255,000. The United
States has total of 9,500,0O0. Canada
100000; the Argentine Republic, >
O00OO0: and Uruguay. 100000.
It is proposed to form a school of
Beauty" in England, in which the menu
Oers, male and female, pledge themselves
to do all they can to make themselves
comely by natural means. Prizes will
be given to those ladies who can move
with ease and grace, and so afford evil
dence of the free use of their limbs,
while it will be a leading rule of the
school that though stays may be used rs
means of support, they shall not be
Ieemed essential as an accessory to
beauty. In other words, natural waist
md well-curved back, with a perfectly
posed head, will be at premium,
In a paper read before the Society OF
Arts, London, James Mactear estimated
the coal consumption of the British
metropolis at over 100000 tons a year
AT one per cent. this would give $4,000
tons of sulphur or 345, 900 tons Of oil of
, vitriol-more than five times the amount
given off by all the sulphuric acid works
. in the country. The yearly consump
I t;on of coal in Great Britain and IrelanC
- $40 tons, which produces ], ,l4Os
',r, or S,500,000 tons Of
idea may thus b
u c.