davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
, 1879-05-08
Such a Joke.

"Bridget," said lady in the city of
Gotham, one morning as she was recon-
noitering in the kitchen, "what guam
tity of soap grease you have got there
We can get plenty of soap for it, and
we must exchange it for some. Watch
for the fat man, and when he comes
along tell him | want to see him.
eyes, num-" said Bridget.
All that morning Bridget, between
each whisk of her dish cloth, kept a
bright lookout from the kitchen window,
and no moving creature escaped her wist
full gaze. At last her industry was re-
warded, for down the street came large,
portly gentleman, fourishing cane, and
looking the very picture of good humor.
"Sure, there's the fat man, now,"
thought Bridget; and when he was in
front of the house out she flew, and in
formed him that her mistress wished to
speak to him.
"Speak to me, my good girlf' replied
the gentleman.
eyes, sir, wants to speak to you; and
she says that you would be kind enough
to walk in, sir"
This request, so direct, was not to be
refused; so in state of some wonder
ment up the steps went the gentleman,
and up the stairs went Bridget, and
knocking at the mistress door, put her
head in and exclaimed:
"Fat gentleman's in the parlor, num-"
So saying, she instantly withdrew to
the lower regions,
"In the parlor +" thought the lady.
"What can it mean? Bridget must have
blundered" But down to the parlor she
went, and up rose her fat friend, with
his blandest smile and most graceful
bow"
"Your servant informed me, Madam,
that you would like to speak to me. At
your service, Madam"
The mortified mistress saw the state
of the case Immediately, and a smile
wreathed itself about her lips in spite of
herself, and she afterwards explained:
"Will you pardon the terrible blunder
of the girl, my dear sir? | told her to
call in the fat man to take away the soap
grease when she saw him, and she has
made mistake, you see."
The jolly fat man learned back in his
chair and laughed such hearty ha ha !!
as never came from any of your lean
gentry.
"No apologies needed, Madam" said
he. at is decidedly the best joke of the
season. Ha! ha! ha so she took me
for soap-grease man, did she2 1t will
keep me laughing for months Such a
good joke"
And in all the streets and around the
corner was heard the merry ha! ha ha !
of the old gentleman, as he brought
down his cane, every now and then ex-
claiming, "Such joker
, 1879-05-08
Senate.
WASHINGTON, April 80.

Consideration was resumed on House bill
providing for certain expenses Of the present
session Of Congress, and for other purposes
the pending question being whether 1t was in
order to amend, as proposed by Plumb, a
clause appropriating $l36, 600 to pay mileage
of the present session. The amendment
was decided in order-33 against 23-was
discussed and agreed to. The bill then
passed, and the Senate considered the bill
to prevent the introduction of contagious or
infectious diseases into the United States.
Hamlin opposed the bill and moved to
recommit with instructions to frame code
of rules and regulations to Gerry the object
of the act into effect.
Herman opposed the bill.
Garland called attention to the fact that it
required all the rules and regulations framed
by the National Board of Health to be uni
form, and be subject to the approval of the
President. The committee did not want the
bill recommitted, as they had already done
all they could to present it in acceptable
shape.
Howe and Conklng opposed the measure.
The Senate went into executive session and
soon adjourned.
After the reading of the journal, the
Speaker presented the veto message of the
President upon the army appropriation bill,
and it was read by the clerk.
At the conclusion of the reading of the
mssace, Sparks offered the following:
Ordered, That the message of the presi-
dent, lust read, be entered at length in the
journal, as required by the constitution Of
the United States, and that the House will
tomorrow proceed to consider said message,
and thereafter reconsider the bill making the
appropriation for the support of the army
for the fiscal year ending June 3Oth, 1880;
and that said message be printed and adopted
The following bills were passed;
Appropriating requisite amount to pay
j. B. Fades, sums due and to become due
for constructing ietties at South Pass.
Amending the section of the revised stat
utes prescribing the penalty for conspiracy
against the United States.
At 21O the House adjourned, and the
Democratic caucus was announced to meet
forthwith.
, 1879-05-08
Senate.
WAsnINNTON. Max

NNHINGTONJ May i,
Consideration was resumed of tho bill to
prevent the introduction Of contagious or in-
fectious diseases into tho United States.
Bell offered the following resolution which
was agreed to:
Resolved, That the secretary of the treas
ury be directed to inform the Senate of the
amount due and uncollectod, if any, under
section S Of the act of August s. 1861, en-.
titled an act to provide increased revenue
from imports to pay interest on the public
debt and for other purposes and to state
reasons, if any exist, why the same have not
been collected agreeably to the provisions Of
said act.
Wallace, from the committee on appropria-
tions, reported bill to provide ior the pay
ment OF county and back pay to those who
were deprived of the same by frauds with
which they had no connection.
Edmunds inquired when the Senate might
expect the committee on appropriations to
report back the Legislative appropriation
bill.
Davis, of West Virginia, replied that the
bill had just been printed. The sub-com-
mittee had been at work on it and might re-
port to the full committe tomorrow.
Edmunds inquired whether it was not the
same bill that was acted on at former
session of Congress, except the matter ex-
traneous to the appropriation.
Davis replied that it was, but it was known
that there were some members on the COM
mittee who were not in the previous Congress
and therefore the entire subject had to be
considered irrespective of former action.
Adjourned.
, 1879-05-08
Senate.
WASHINGTON, April %.

NAbHANdIONI april 20.
The legislative, executive and Judicial ap-
preparation bill was received from the House
and referred to the committee on appropria-
tons.
House joint resolution to repeal certain
clauses in the sundry civil appropriation act
of March 2, 1877, passed. 1t makes appro-
priatons for the extension of military tele-
graph lines in Montana and Texas.
The bill giving seats on the floor OF the
Senate and House to heads of departments
was taken up and Pendleton made speech
in it's advocacy.
Williams introduced bill to regulate the
value of metal money and provide for the
free and unlimited coinage Of gold and silver
bullion, and to restore coin to circulation;
referred. 1t provides to make all gold and
silver coins, including the trade dollar,
equally legal tender for all debts, public
and private, to any amount at their nomina-
value.
, 1879-05-08

other was captured near by. The dead rob
Der was John sullivan formerly Of Gold Hill
and Virginia, but who lately cams here from
Bodic. The other is Charles Ennis, also
late Of Bodie. Tho latter was lodged in Jail,
The body of Sullivan was brought in.
Silvcr sale amt Coinage.
san FHANcIsco, May 1.-The Bank Of Cal
ifornia has sold the government 10000
ounces ot silver for delivery here at 1lO&.
Coinage of the san Francisco mint for
April: Double eagles, ~, $40, 600; standard
dollars one million. The Carson mint was
idle during the month. Treasure shipment
per City Of peking, fine silver, S2OS, 200;
trade dollars, 1l,06G; MeNicaus, S53,94l;
gold coin, 10, 1870.
The Treasury Trouble.
Treasurer Hubert s bondsmen have agreed
to make good tho Cassebohm deficiency if
the commissioners will reinstate the treas
urer. Judge Wright holds that the defalca-
tion Is only technical, and that tie restoration
of the money is all that the law can require.
In this opinion W. G. Burnett, city and
county attorney, concurs. The mayor,
auditor and county judge have taken the
proposition to reintsate Hubert under advise.
ment, and it is probable that he will be re-
instated on the payment Of S25, 600 by his
sureties.
A had Man.
1t has been ascertained that VIM. Treen,
clerk of the city criminal court, has ab-
seconded, leaving q number Of creditors to
mourn his departure. 1t seems that he has
taken none of the public money with him,
but has victimized private parties to the
tune OF several thousand dollars. He left
some days ago, ostensibly for Los Angeles,
but in reality for New York. Telegrams have
been sent to secure his arrest.
British Columbia.
VICTORIA, B. c., May 1.-The secession
difficulty has been tided over by Parliament
which was prorogued Immediately upon sat
isfactory assurance of an intention to COM
mence the railway this year having been re-
ceived from Ottawa.
, 1879-05-08
PACIFIC COAST.
stock speculator,s suicide.

SAN Francisco, April 2s.-W, F. Casse-
bohm, first assistant city treasurer, COM
mitted suicide this afternoon by shooting
himself through the head. He left note
addressed to the coroner stating that he had
been led into stock speculation by Alexander
Austin, late city tax collector, who also
suicided, defaulter to large amount; that
he had lost $35, 900 in speculation and had
used $4,000 of the sity's money to cover
margins, and being unable to make it good,
saw no resort but to follow Az stin's example;
had always borne good name and could not
bear the disgrace Of public exposure and
prosecution.
The Treasury.
SAN Francisco, April 30.--The doors Of
the city treasury are still closed. The only
occupants are the grand jury experts who
are going over the books and accounts of the
treasuzer's Office. 1t is expected that the
new treasurer will qualify and the doors be
opened tomorrow. 1t has been ascertained
that $50, 900 in bonds furnished by Casse-
bohm to Trea7urer Hubert were given in
December, 1872, and having never been re-
pewed, are only good for that term. Several
Of the bondsmen state they do not believe
they are liable and they do not propose to
make the defalcation good. In case they do
not. the city must look to Mr.. Hubert and
his bondsmen. The only question involved
is when Cassebohm committed the defalca-
ton. 1t is thought that an investigation Of
the cash book kept by Deputy Gender will
disclose when the defalcation occurred, and
if it happened during the term for which
Cassebohm gave bonds, his bondsmen will
be compelled to make good the dedication.
Life In Nevada.
EUREKA, April 30.--The Ruby Hill stage
was stopped near town last night by three
masked men. Passengers relieved of about
$500 in money and jewelry. Last night two
men entered the stable of .;tewart Il Co.,
bulldosing three or four men who were pres
ent, sadded two of the finest horses in the
stable and went off. The sheriff's posse was
soon in pursuit. At daylight this morning
the thieves were overtaken at the mouth Of
Railroad Canyon, 40 miles north OF Eureka
on the Elko road. A fight ensued between
the officers and robbers, in which one of the
robbers was almost instantly killed and the
, 1879-05-08
House.


The bill reported from the coinage COM
mittee, amending the statutes relating to
coinage and to gold and silver bullion certii-
Gates, came up. The pending question was
on ordering the main question on resolu-
ton postponing till Saturday next. Con-
siueration Of the bill was ordered-yeas 1885,
nays 107 The resolution was then adopted.
Sparks called up the order made yester.
day TO reconsider the army appropriation
bill. A vote was taken upon the question,
no debate being allowed upon reconsidera-
ton. The House refused to pass the bill
over the Presidents veto, the vote standing:
yeas, l20; nays, 110-not the necessary two
thirds in the affirmative. 1t was strictly a
party vote. Only three of the greenbackers
voted for the bill and nine against it.
Adjourned till Saturday.
, 1879-05-08
British Columbia.
FORTY.SIXTH CONGRESS-

WASHINGTON, Apri.

WASHINGTON, April 26.
Upon assembling the House went into
committee of the whole on the legislative
appropriation bill, under the five minutes
rule.
Ewing and Garfield each spoke fifteen
minutes by unanimous consent.
When debate closed, an amendment offered
by Weaver, striking out all proposed legisla-
ton except that relating to the test oath, WAS
defeated without di vision. A vote was then
taken by tellers on Garfeld's amendment
striking out all the legislation, and defeated
by 124 to 100. The result was received with
applause by the Democratic side.
The House, by 1862 against 81, refused to
adjourn until Wednesday, but shortly after
waad adjourned until Tuesday, the vote
ordering adjournment over Monday being
ayes 1872, nays IS.
, 1879-05-08
FOREIGN NEWS.
The Afghan War.

LONDON, April 2S.-Telegrams from India
speak of the complete break down of the
quartermaster and comissary departments Of
the Khyber column, now at Jellalabad and
Gandamah, owing to lack of transportation
The column is said to be incapacitated for
offensive operations. The garrison OF Can.
dahar is in a very similar position. In con.
, 1879-05-08

A Dutch saloonist when asked why
he hung beer mug in front of his place,
replied: "Don't the Constitution OF the
United States say, Hang out your ban
ner on dose outside wallsP So you see
I puts mine flag on the front walls Of
mine sthore"
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22
WHAT ARE rHe PRoFITs?wE

This is the absorbing point that is of
chief interest in every business trans
action. By the combination system Of
operating in stocks, Messrs. Lawrence
& Co., Bankers, n. Y, unite the orders
of thousands of patrons, in various
sums, into one immense amount, and
operate them rs a mighty whole, thus
obtaining all the advantages Of the
largest capitalist and best skill. Profits
are distributed pro rata among share
holders every month. In this way
large gains are secured in short periods,
and capital from $40 or SIS to $50, 900
can be used with equal proportionate
success. $40 will make 500 in 30 days.
$50 will pay / ,500 profit, or 10 per
cent. on the stock, and SO on, accord
ing to the market. A citizen of Troy,
made 1857 5 on an investment of $50.
Many customers are doing better. The
new circular has 1.-TWO unerring rules
for success and full details so that
any n can operate profitably Stocks
and bonds wanted. Government bonds
supplied. Apply to Lawrence & Co.,
Bankers, 81 Exchange Place, n. Y,
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22
proteet the System from MalarIa,

ltis Posstoie eenin testons OF
where the periodic fevers which IL causes as
sumo their most formidable types. The i'm
mense~ popularity OF Hostetter's Bit
tiers is very largely attributable to the fact OF
It's efficacy as a remedy for chills and fever.
bilious remittenfs, and as n preventive OF the
various forms OF malnrinl disease. In those
portions Of the West and South where COM
plants ofthis nature prevail. and in theTro-
pics, 1t Is particularly esteemed for the pro-
tective influence which II exerts; and IL has
been very widely adopted as a substitute for
the dangerous and comparatively ineffective
alkaloid .sulphate OF quinine Physicians
have not been among the last to concede Its
dorsements which IL has received have added
70 the reputation II has obtained at home and
aboard.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

Many clergymen who were obliged 8
withdraw from the pulpit on account
of 'Clergymen's Sore Throat" have
recovered by using Fellows Syrup
Hypophosphites and are preaching
again. This preparation seems pecu-
liarly and wonderfully adapted to dis
eases of the breathing organs.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

SOME one has started the story that
"a st. Louis mar died from the effect
Of drinking two and a-half pints of
whiskey." There seems to be a typo
graphical hitch in this statement. 1t
should probably read 1.-TWO and a-half
-
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

COLONIES of English cavalry are
paid S2,095 per nnu No low sal
aries there. But then an officer has to
live to almost the age of Methuselah
for promotion to a colonelcy, unless he
is a scion of noble stock, or as rich as
Crasus, or the protege of the prime
minister
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

OF COURSE the house will pass the
Legislative appropriation bill with the
senate amendments, and then the presi-
dent will come in for his share Of legis-
lative action. His veto is a foregone
conclusion.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE temperance movement that is
creating a furore in New York, is a
moderate drinkers association. The
members are pledged not to drink at
any other persons expense, nor ask
ANYBODY to drink.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

OF ALL the strange combinations for
the establishment Of the world in 80,
that of "Davis and Adams,n is the
boss. What the former exceeds in heat
a be equalized by the frigidity of the
latter. Here we have a delightful mix
ture of ginger and ice.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE longer Proctor Knott lives the
palmer becomes the fact that his cele-
brated speech on "Duluth-the Zenith
City Of the Unsalted Seas" was writ
ten by Pat Donan, q newspaper CORES
pendent.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE Denver Tribune advises David
Davis to wheel a barrow wei the con
tinent as the only means of getting be-
fore the public again. Besides it would
be good anti-fat medicine.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

TEXAS is the biggest state in the
union with the smallest treasury. In
fact the state treasurer has no funds, SO
the legislators have to go without pay.
This is a hardship that few legislators
are forced to bear.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

PRIZE fighting is booming all over
the country. It may become so popu
lar by next year that the presidential
canvass may be written up and cartoon
ed in prize fighting style, as it was in
1860.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

IN the wreck of the democratic back
bone, Joe Blackburn must have got
covered up with the debris. He hasn't
footed his horn for the best part of some
time.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

AND even Secretary McCrary is ac-
cused Of bucolic hankerings. He has
written to Iowa to know how the fences
stand. Owning none himself, he is
willing to do mending for his friends.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

DR.. CARVER is shooting OFF his
mouth with the same wonderful effect
as his rifle. He told the Prince of
Wales that he has shot one hundred
buffaloes in one day.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THERE have been many executions.
Of late. All of the victims died profess.
ing Christianity. This fact indicates
the best purpose of hanging. The gal
lows make good missionaries.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

DAVID DAVIS has always been a
straw showing which way the winning
wind blows.-Denrer Neus.
He is just the one to break the back
of the democratic camel.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

WEST bound freight trains in the
east are so troubled with tramps
that the train men experience
much difficulty in getting rid Of the
vermin. They are all bound for Lead
Vile.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

GEN. GRANT will write a book when
he returns home, gossip says. Tilden
a then have some revenge at no ex-
pense to himself.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE cattle in the districts surround
ing st. Petersburg, Russia, are afflicted
with some sort of a disease which the
local veterinarians cannot cure.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

WHEN a "A commits suicide for
fear that he will become insane, it is
not difficult to determine how near he
reached the dreaded point.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

SHOULD congress feel the pulse of
the country, it will find strong beats
for a homeward march.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

IT Is written that Sherman and Til
den must fight in the Ohio tournament
this fall. The election will effectually
dispose of one presidential aspirant.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

LET me mend the fences of my III
try, and Icare not who makes her laws.
John Sherman.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

WONDER why all the Mormon news
papers are democratic in politicsp Win
the Ogden Junction please answer?
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

AUSTRIA and Spain will once again
intermarry. Alfonso will then have
good moral backing to his throne.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE "war measures still remain on
the statute books, the brigadiers to the
contrary Notwithstanding.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE more stalwart MI. Hayes grows,
the more indistinct become the pros
poets of Gen. Grant.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

IT IS stated Officially" that Mr..
Tilden will not go to Frisco to meet
Gen. Grant.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22
SPECIAL NOTICES.


Card.
To all who are suffering from the errors and
indiscretions of youth, nervous weakness,
early decay, loss OF manhood, &C., / will send
a receipt that will cure you FREE OF
CHARGE. This great remedy was discovered
by a missionary In South America. Send a
self-addressed envelope to the Rev. JOSEPH
t. INsAN, Station d.. New York. ALLY
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE south has about concluded that
the negro is mot as black as he is
painted.n
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

EMPEROR WILLIAM is improving
rapidly in health, and is in first-class
condition for target purposes.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

PLEURo-PNEUMoNIA has broken out
in the Nutmeg State. One would think
that state proof against the plague.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

The Weekly LEADER has the largest
circulation and is the best paper west.
Subscribe for it.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

MONTREAL is rapidly becoming the
center of the Canadian wheat ma rket.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

THE eleventh commandment-Thou
shalt not bow down before any caucus.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22

TTLDEN says it isn't a solid south,
He is only sure of three states.
The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-05-22
Brinker Collegiate Institute.

THIS PAPER pax Sd be frs's On Gle q Gee;
.dvertis;ug Bureau q Spruce So whers ndveTiisins