Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1879-12-19
ALL SORTS.

ALL SORTS.
"A handsome thing in dresses-A
pretty girl.
:" No place like comb" as the bee
said to the honey.
Congressman Cannon, of Utah, is
the possessor of six wives.
The owner of foul tongue is often
chicken-hearted. -Hackensac5 Repu6.
licdn.
Dating from the Christian era COM
menced in Italy in 525 and in England
in 816.
-" I'll meet you later" was what
the butcher said to dog just brought
to his shop.
Weather prophets are predicting
that skates and sleighs will be of little
use this winter
"A man is never ashamed of his an
cestors until he runs for office in a free
country. -HGWk-Eye.
The title of doctor was invented in
the twelfth century, at the first estab-
hshment of the universities.
Now, if money was ever half so tight
as the mau who spends it-then you
might look out for panics. HdoOk- Eye.
The Yonkers Gazette has seen MANY
of them, and it says, "a girl walking
with the average dandy is next to moth
ing"
The pianoforte was invented by a
German named Americus Backers, and
was first used in public at Covent
Garden Theater in 1867.
1t must be heap of satisfaction to
blow up the Cars baggage train and
make him short of clean shirts for a
day or two.-BoSton Post.
WHAT were the worst results of
the civil WARP" cried an orator. ovid
| ows," shouted Jones, who had married
one.-Pttts6urg Chronicle.
There are rumors that Kelley, the
motor man, has turned his attention to
a machine for sticking pins through a
starched collar.-Free Press.
The Steubenville Chronicle saws thai
the report is without foundation that
the limberger cheese factories in this
country are not making a (s)cent.
Fifty thousand acres of land in
Parker and Palo Pinto Counties, Texas,
have just been purchased by French
capitalist for colonization purposes.
If all trades fail Alfonso can go
West and start u shoe shop. He has
married lady with forty eight pairs of
shoes.-N Y. Commercial a dUerttSer.
In the bright lexicon of the modern
pedagogue there's no such word as
whale" but there's just as much
blubber among the pupils. s.-NeU Raven
Register.
1t is difficult to understand why a
wife never asks her husband "if the
doors are all locked" until after he is
snugly covered up in Waterloo
Observer.
The two important events in the
life of man are when he examines his
upper lip and sees the hair coming and
when he examines the top of his head
and sees the hair going.
"A petrified woman has been dis
covered near Halifax. 1t is supposed
that her husband gave her $40 without
asking to get new winter bonnet and
she was petrified with astonishment.
"A Michigan man set bear trap in
his wood lot, and found bear in it
every morning for fourteen consecutive
days. At the end of that time the bear
got out and took to the woods. Boston
Post.
1t is so in politics, business, and
everywhere else in life. The man
whom you boost up the tree not only
forgets to toss you down some of the
fruit, but is as likely as not to pelt you
with the chawings.
"A Danbury man can kick eleven
inches higher than his head. Should
the next year prove good one for fruit
he hopes to make considerable money
in travelling through the State and
kicking boys out of trees.-DGn6ury
NeSOS.
The young man of mechanical turn
of mind, who can saw out any number
of beautiful brackets and picture frames,
becomes as helpless as baby when the
larger and more important buck-saw
work is suggested to him. m.-Netourb
Sunday Call.
There is nothing so charming as
the innocence of children. Mamma"
said five-years-old, the other day, II
wish you wouldn' leave me to take care
of baby again. He was so bad l had to
eat all the sponge cake and two jars of
raspberry jam to amuse him."
He passes gently to the street,
And sighs, How good to breathe once
more
The outer air; how fresh and sweet
The balmy breezes from the shore
How fair the blossoms at my feet;
The stars on heavens cerulean floor,
Whose silvery singing seems to beat
In pulsing measures eYeTmoreh
Then, chasing after his retreat,
voice comes with an angry roar,
"You blasted idiot Shut the door!"
American Queen.