The weekly Union times. [volume] (Union C.H., South Carolina) 1871-1894, 1879-08-01

mahogony is reddy fur pantin', she's got
turnup nose an reddish hair, she's onion
eyed, an punkin complicated, an her cheeks
does beet all natur! Speakin' Of colorin'
minds me of another pertness of my Dan
ell. Mother sez he to me. what, son 2
sez l. Mother, sez Dan, Il wish to convul-
sions L could carry a ra'al live Amerikin
sunsent to that eternal Worlds Fair !;
wouldn't it 'stonish them Britishers fe,o?'
scz he. Talk of Itilly-why it's three
miles out in the country-fact it aint jist
no whar in natur-Amerikin sunsets beats
creation in the matter o dye stu6s they
do-so help me ole Powhatun, Pokybun-
tas. an few of the rest of the Smiths
My Danel, he is exstrornary cute an no
mistake, fact he's the chief among ten
thousan' an altogether procuriu'. I've a
notion of runnin' him agin the Presidency,
or putin him to ingincerin,' one; but can't
make up my mind which he's got the great
est talons fur"
What is tho opinion of Miss Saffrons'?
inquired Adelaide, with smile.
"Miss Saffrons bless your innocent soul,
honey, she haint got no opinion previous to
Dancl-she's arter the minister-the lau'
look down She expects to go to him when
she dies-if she had her choice this min
ute, which to go to, him or-or Paradise,
she wouldn't know what to do, she haint
found out yet which is the greatest man!
"She used to do her little uttermost to
git him roun' to her house when they had
the delegation meetius-they used to hev
a meetiu', you know, three times q week,
fur the outfttin' of the members, etc. an
so on. Well, every feminine that felt an
interest in the wel-bcin' of herself, or her
ked'ntry, or that expected to take hand
either in Time or never -endurin' Eternity,
wuz to come up to these mectin's, an help
to make up the prescription strong enuff to
carry 'em all to Worcester an back, an she
had leave at the same time to put in any
complaint or petition which she wanted to
hcv tended to in the convention. One
mornin' arter I'd got every thing cleaned
up, an the dairy put to rights, three new
cheescs in the press, an dinner on, l thought
I'd jist run over an SEQ what they were all
up to, so claps on my sun.bunnet-that
new grcca one, you know, an off | starts
Thoy met at the 'cadcmy that mornin', aud,
sakcs alive! sich nussi When went
in, there wuz Miss Skinfint, an Miss Trot-
well, an Miss Saffrons, all standin' up in
a row, with papers an pcnsils, putin down
the names an tho complaints an the pre-
criptions-thcrc wuz their heads shakin'
an their hands a wavin', an their tongues
ruttlin'. The lau'! Noah's ark an the tower
of Babel, all messn' up together on lee
tion day, want circumstance to that there.
4lost the first thing I olappcd eyes on, when
| opened the door, wuz Miss Becbout, the
timers wife, her that's allays shoutin' so
infuDal at camp. mcetins and sich like
She's one of them customary fussy critters
that would get up muss in the kingdum
cum, always kickin' up dust, an raisn'
the ole misery gincrally. Well, she wuz
down on her knees in the middle of 'em,
an right in frunt Of the delcgation-she'd
got the steam up, an thought she wuz in the
altuc, sure cnuff. Here enuff. Here she
went on cavortin cob! you're comm
sec yon're comin'--now's the good time
here's the right way-cum one, cum all
who kears fur expenses ?-oh oh 90
Oh ! an down she went as usual. poor
thin ! scz one. what q martyr in the
great cause ! sez anothcr-'Sich cnthoosy-
ism sich insensibility ! sez they all, Miss
Skinfint she sees me. an beckons mo over
to her side the housc,-she wuz talkin'
away fur life to Miss Margaret, the minis
ter's sister. She keeps house fur the par
son, who is bachelor, an never wuz mar
rid, though she's a proper nice woman
she's got more sense in a minute than that
hull delegation will hcv to all cvcrlastin'
kingdum cum.
81 seed sortor mischeevous twinkle in
her eye as she gin olo Miss Skirhint the
dollar as wuz usual, sayin' she was afraid
she couldn't 'preciate the great cause but
as she was calm at the time, she couldn't
90 away without contributin' to give her
a Grip, an hoped she might enjoy it. Oh !
scz Miss Skinflint, if it wuz only for my
own good I'd die before I'd accept this dol
lar, scz she, jcrkin' it into her green ridi-
cule Oh the fast principle, but, soz she, it's
fur you as well as me, it's fur us ALL it's fur
the hull commeunity-it's fur the hull fem
ininc univarse, scz she, it's to sustain our
posishun, it's to maintain our dignity, it's
to obtain our rights, as free citizens of tho
public, an winmen of the 10Th century
Sez she, it's fur Mis here that your bcnev-
olensc contributes this dollar! chuckin up
the ridicule in her hand. / beg pardon,
sez Miss Margaret, but fear it will not
accomplish So much as you hope. Don't
you think ace kin do it cries Miss Skin.
H,.k