The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1879-09-05
LrrrLE sonsSY.s ANECDOTES.

LITTLE J0iaNNf's AsEED0TEs.
Gotes butts, and Uncle Ned he
said: 1JohnDy one day there was
a cote In a field, and 10 took after
BIldad, which you better explain to
yure bnited readers Is the new dog.
BiIdad he run toward a hi fence for
to get over but the cote it cot him
and butfed him cruil on the tail, and
be whirled over and over, and lit on
the uther side Of the fence but didn't
kno Il cos he was bewildered, and
scrambled back over the fence again,
lifcly as be cude, and the cote it let
him have 1t other time, and wock-
ed away. Bildad he was stonish
dog, and shuke his he'd, much as to
say; Il never see so many buttigotes,
ono In eyry feeld 2"
If ! was a cote / rather be a sheep,
cos goie0 IL milled, bat sheep Is shin
gled, and the rose Is red and the vi-
lets blu. But Billy says let him be a
crocky dile with fritefie teeth, and
n0tehes on his back like a saw.
Mister Jonnice, wich has got tire
wuden leg,say ther die wich was
sho, and IL was In d pond. Mr.. JON
nice set on the edge Of the pond a
watehin the die swim, but the keeper
he said, the keeper did (: oBetter
look out for yure legs, sir, this ere
die Is powerful fond of legs, and he
don't git menny here, pore fellow"
So Mister Jonnice he tuke OF his
wuden leg and hid II, and wen the
keeper he cum round agin Afr. Jcnnice
he sed "Y0u was rite about that
dile.p
The keeper he looked and was as
t0nish, aud he sed "Shant ] run
for a docktor?''
Then Mister Jonniee he thot a vile
and bime by he sed "No, / don't
think ! wude, not for vile yet,
emmy how. Dies Is use to overeatin
theiraelfs.1
The keeper he sed: eYeu are the
coolest man, wots left Of you, which
/ have ever saw
Mister Jonnice be sed aWell, !
have all ways went on the principle
Its no use cryin for yure leg of, but
Ide be mighty bliged to sou for a
drink OF whisky"
When the keeper he brought ii
Mister Jonnice sed ne had been stand
ing up looking at the die, and the
keeper he was astonisher than ever,
pertickler wen Mister Jonnice sed he
had been standing there an our and
had never see him before.
One time there was a rInosy rose
met cammle, and IL sed, the rinosy
rose did: "1fI had sech xcres-
sence on my back like thatn OF yourn
Ide hay a operation p'formed.
The camnile It sed: eTaint very
pretty, that's q fack, but seems 10
me that yure nose, isent Jest the kind
wich OF to be turned up at xcres-
sences."
And now for a story about ole CAT
fer Peters.
one day Jack Brlly, wich is the
wicked saiIer, swears and everything,
he was goin by old Gaffres house,
an he foun him digin a well, and a
boy was pulin up the rocks In awind-
lass. So Jack no give the boy bits,
apd sed, esYou 80 and git some can
dy, and lie pull for you till you get
back" and the boy done 1t. Then
Jack he puts his bull dog in the
bucket, and LET it down, and the dog
1t jumped out in the wei with CATER,
wich holercd wild, and the dog too.
Then Jack he cot ole Gafferses cat and
pitch that down, too, the dog tackled
the cat between Gafferses legs, and
the cat it run up CATER like he was
o tree, and all yeIlin like linens,
there wasent never such fife! Af-
ter while Jack he let the bucket
down and hauld old CATER up with
the windlass, loekin' nifty beat and
his close tore bad. Fore CATER eude
get his breath Jack sed "I'ell yon
wot, CATER, If | hadent come along
yude had pretty rough time of il
ges, COS that boys gon for other
cat"
Then CATER he helped Jack git the
dog out wich had kid the eat, and
Jack and the dog they went away,
and wen the boy come in Gaffer met
him half way and licked him till he
was sick a bed, aud wen Billy hC
sassed the scoohl master he was lick
ed, too, yes, in deed, and made bel
Ter.