Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1879-11-23
''TOO NEAR THE STOVE"
A Story of Tom Placide, the Actor.

A Story of Tom Placide, the Actor.
A popular comedian, whom we shall
beg leave to introduce as Tom Placide,
In the course of starring tour through
the States was descending the Mississippi,
IN tine spirits, plenty Of money. and a
sporting coat. There were divers queer
characters On board the steamer with.
whom Tom who, dearly loved fun, even
while amusing himself with their various
peculiarities, was, nevertheless great
favorite. None of them, however, wooed
his good opinion more sedulouslv and
kindly than any elderly backwoodsman
from the innermost depths of Indiana,
now bent upon visit to New Orleans
for the first time in his life. This russell
looking antique, whether it was from the
comedians sporting buttons, or the never
ending llghtness and gayety of his talk,
had fully made up his mind that Tom
was a gentleman sportsman, and when
ever he saw small game going on, he
was careful in noticing the skill and
quality OF the players, the stake to be
lost or gained, &C., and bringing Tom
all the various particulars.
The gentleman sportsman was very
much obliged, of course, for all this un-
looked for information, though he didn't
exactly know at the time what the deuce
to make of it; when, one day, the conf
dental backwoodsman took him aside
and told him there was a 'sthunde1ing
smart chance for pile" on one OF the
tables and it he had no objections he
would Ego in with him snacks!" Tom,
though highly amused at the offer, I'M
fortunately for his knowing friend de-
tested gambling in every shape; he, there
fore, at once told his proposing partner
that he was mistaken, and, in short, that
his fancy coat covered not a sportsman,
| but player.
"Good gracious!' exclaimed the aston
Hhed backwoodsman, zone of them fel-
lers as tumbles! I've seen 'em, once,
more'n half naked, cuttin' up down to
Madison!"
Instead of troubling himself much in
explaining to his new friend the differ
| ence between theatrical sh0so and CIR
Gus shoao, Tom, highly delighted. retail
ed the story of the cards to various of his
fellow passengers in such a ludicrous
manner as instantly to render the old fell
low quite an object Of interest. Next to
the card-playing was another object that
had completely aroused the backwoods-
mans curiosity; and this was very large
and singularly- shaped pine box, which
| lay in the Social Hall, or general saloon
OF the steamer containing nothing, more
nor less than huge bass fiddle, the prop
erty of very reserved and gloomy look
ing German, on his way South; profess
slonly.
"Placy," whispered the backwoodsman
! to Tom,I one day-for he had got very
familiar after learning that he belonged
to show-''what on earth hev they got
m that box, think ye? It's the onhuman-
lst shape ever seed in all creation"
s'Hush! replied Tom, mysteriously.
'Don't you know?"
"Not I. I'm mighty dead guessin'"
"Then it's bodles!' echoed the startled
woodsman. You don't mean ra'al hu-
man bodies?"
"Bodies!" still repeated Tom, at the
same time applying his handkerchief to
his nose. "Taking them down for dissec-
ton. Belong to a doctor on board"
The woodsman turned Immediately
away, his eyes wild with horror, holding
his nose. At length, to crafty his insat-
liable curiosity, he ventured to inquire if
they were "niggers."
"White woman and her two babes,"
was Toms cool reply. "One on each
side of her-accounts for the shape of
the box.'
At this moment the pale, moody, I'M
shaver violinist approached them, anG
Toms thoroughly deceived victim made
way for him, as if he had been the chol-
era incarnate.
"Goes about diggin' on EN- up, does
he? muttered the woodsman between his
teeth, in suppressed voice. "Why, it'll
breed pisen!''' and up an deck he went,
to breathe the fresh air. Tom speedily
disseminated the story, also, among his
fellow passengers, who were so highly
amused with the joke that they resolved
to carry it on. Whenever, therefore the
horror-stricken woodsman was present.
care was taken to make wide circuits
whenever they had to approach the box,
using their handkerchiefs, and express
ing much indignation at the captain for
permitting that description Of freight to
be brought under the noses of his passen-
gers. Tom talked Of leaving the steam
er, and others Of lynching the doctor.
until at length the captain, who had got
hint of the fun, approached the grum-
blcrs, then gathered into knot at one
end of the saloon
-"Phew! 1t is very warm here, gentle
men; phew!' shifted the captain. And
he pulled out'his handkerchief. "Gentle-
| men, isn't there something very :1nnleas-