St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1879-01-31

md everywhere that Mary went
The lamb sure to go.
CHINESE.
Vas gal named Moll had lamb
Flea all samee whitee snow,
Gvly place Moll gal walkee,
Ba ba hOppee long too
IRISH.
Mary had little shape,
And the wool was white intirely,
And wherever Mary wud sthir her sthumps
The young shape would follow her complately
FRENCH
La petite Marie had lie june muttong
Zee wool was blanchee as re snow
And everywhere La belle Marie went
LIE june muttong was sure to 60
Dot Mary haf got Elm leedle shat,
Nit hair yust like some WOOL
Und all der place dot gal did vent,
Dot shat go like elm fool
A correspondent asks, "Does Oar
wins descent of man throw any light
on Adams fall ?"
Distinguished divine Ito recent con-
vert): "We propose to baptize you by
the Turkish bath method. Ii is really
the only means to scrub your years of
sin out OF you"
A Rutland lawyer, whose acquaint-
ance with the Bible is limited, referring
to some prisoners, said to jury re-
Gently, 81 tell you their knees shook as
shook the knees of Belthazer when Paul
said unto him, Thou art the man."
Rev. Jack Walkingstick, Rev. Poor
Wolf, and Rev. Mr. Whrlwind are
members of the Cherokee Indian Bap-
tist Association in the Indian Territory.
The irony of the law is shown when
blacksmith is sentenced for forgery
NeW York Mail.
When man gets bald in Colorado
they say his head has got above the
timber Chicago Tribune.
One of our county officials put a qui-
etus OH book agent the other day in a
very neat way. The man was trying
to sell all encyclopaedia, and the book
chanced to open at the word "bore."
"What does that mean ?r asks official.
The agent, rather astonshed, goes into
Il long explanation. When finished,
| Mr.. Official says, .Is-that- 2"
at the same time looking meaningly in
to the agents eyes. Agent takes he
hint, packs up aud departs.-Red WiRg
(Minn.) Argus.
A bright little 3-year-old, living on
Elm street, was visiting at neighbours
the other evening, and while there she
met a little fellow of about her own
age. During the evening the little fell
low stepped up to her and began con-
versatiOn thus: ~ can ketch more fish
than you can" The little miss paid no
attention TO this remark until it was re-
peated, when she put stop to that sort
of juvenile brag by shaking her finger
ut him and Replying: "WeU, you'd bet
ter go and do it then rr On another
evening, while her mother was trying
to get her to sleep, she became interest
ed i'll some outside noise. She was told
that 1t was caused by cricket, when
she sagely observed "Mamma, think
he ought to be oiled" Mon tpelier Watch-
man.
"Would'st play me false All, yes 4;
| see it in thy furtive eye. How now
-unhand me, villain ~ said lady on
the Sutter street dummy the other day,
looking vely hard at the young man
who sat next her. "Great Casarl l
amt a-touching yer," said the Y. M,
much surprised. "Sir?n 81 say
didn't do nothing. It's fearful crowded
here, but haven't laid hand on yer,
miss" "Oh, do be quiet, you rude
thing! Can't you see, Pm just going
over my part; )" and the popular lead
ing lady got off in huff.-San Francis
co Ne,US Letter.
Lucius Jarvis of Jericho, L. l., saw
the old year out in a peculiar vigil.
Somebody had stolen from his wood
pile; so he rugged deadfall sort of a
trap. Tuesday night he heard the
thing spring. Rushing, gun in hand,
to the spot, he found his pet bulldog
had become involved and he slid in to
help him out. By some unaccountable
freak of the trap the deadtall landed
upon Mr.. Jarvis's neck, and, lying there
beside his faithful dog, he was kept a
prisoner through the night and watched
the coming in of 1879 with mingled
emotions. The coming of his neighbors
pleased him better.
Bookseller-What sort of books do
you want, sir9 Baggs-O, such books
seller-And how many7 Baggs-Wal,
my liberery is twelve by fifteen, and /
want it full. Bookseller you
have them bound in Russia or Moroc-
COT Baggs-O, don't send so far!
Have them bound in LondOn.-Har-
Uard LampOon.
The London World tells this story
OF how an annoyed musician revenged
himself: "One of the most eminent nj
anlsts in London having suffered much
from the 1rrepressible conversation of
drawing-rOom audiences, devised the
other day means of giving lesson to
the town. He arranged with his violin,
his violincello and the rest that the
music should come to a sudden ston in
the midst of the lOudest passage of the
piece at given signal from him. 1t
was done. The bawling and shouting
voices were left, in the twinkling of an
eye, high and dry, as it were, upon a
shore of silence. Joyous, clear and dis
tinct above them all rose voice from
the foremost seats, the voice of Lady
-: we always fry ours in lard.'n
We are not told to what country the
individual belonged who got so we'll
matched in the following story: A per-
son more remarkable for inquisitiveness
than good breeding-One of those who.
devoid OF delicacy, and reckless of re-
buff, pry into everything took the lib
erty to question Alexandra Dumas
rather closely concerning his genealog-
lcal tree. "YOuare a auadroon. M D9-
mas" he began. 81 am, sir.n replied
M Dumas, who had seen enough not Tn
De ashamed of descent he could not
c0nGa1I