The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-09-25
ALB AULDER'S GOAT.
BY JOHN W. HATToN

BY JOHN w. HATTON.
Alb Aulder lived lonely life, for he could not
agree ~
With kith nor kin, nor friend nor foe, and
was he: e
But Abner had weakness for dogs AMI goats and
cats. f3e
And as often as he ate himself he fed the mice and
rats ks ~
He loved his horses, COWS and sheep, but most of
all goat bx
Called Billy, whom he oft declared had sense
enough to vote.
If Billy was so very wise twas Abner made him
so,
For everywhere old Abner went the goat was sure
to go.
He taught the beast to fight the boys, and drive
them from the place.
And laughed until his sides were sore at many
frantic race 10
Full many boy went limping home to nurse his
wrath and PAIN
But never loitered thereabout nor pestered Alb
again.
And when peddler CHANGED that way, to vend his
wares, tits said,
He paused without the gate awhile, to feel of
Billy's head tNI re 4
Which was as hard as any stone-he felt it's hard
ness, too, -~
For Billy spread him on the ground and banged
him black and blue.
A Bible agent came one day; pious man was he,
But Billy chased him out the yard and up an ap-
pie tree, 81, t.,4
From which the man of tracts made tracks. in
haste to get away, '@'"r
When Billy left him for spell to MUNICH wisp of
hay. s.t
And when the man of lightning rods came down to
Aulder's farm, "'
Old Abner said the goat tame, was sure he
meant no harm;
But ere the pedder drew his BREATH he thought his
spine was riven ... t, ...t.f.
BY something like thunderbolt fast and fercely
driven.
Now all the neighbors Stunned the place; old Alb
was left alone. t. .. 4eg IA
In health in sickness, all the same, none heard his
plantive groan. . .'
He almost died when sick one day-none tried his
life to save;
But all agreed that Billy should go with him to the
grave. ..... .
They'd kill that goat" when Abner should pass
in his checks" they said; .
Some favored torture all agreed to kill the creature
dead, tt#'t
Now Billy had grown cross of late, for want of ex
erCise
He hated everything that moved, his master, too,
deSpiSed. 40
But Abner loved him all the more, the meaner he
And chuckled at the mischief done, the money he
had saved. .... "a -.,t4
He swore if Parson Brown would come that way to
sing and pray
He'd pay his salary for year. and plank it down"
next day. .. ..., =
But Abner knew the parson would as lief whal-
ing go <tJ
Like JONAH to meet old BILL and take his head in
tow.
The wicked shall not live tits said but half three
score and ten, .atI .u.G .#
But Abner had grown pretty old, and very gray. in
sin;
And the goat was sure the DEVILS own if goats are
owned below,
And all agreed where Abner went the goat was sure
to go. ...t
Hard by, bridge of logs was built, across a
chasm deep, .., g.. ..E
And to this bridge old Alb would go to mediate
and sleep.
Now Alb had bought some strychnine and soaked if
well in corn
To dose flock of turkeys that belonged to Mrs
Dorm. rs.5le
The poisoned grain he placed with care upon
corner shelf;
No creature knew the secret dire, except old Alb
himself -...
Then Abner hied him to the bridge to take his
MONDAY sleep,
While Billy eyed him from afar, so plump and fat.
and sleek.
He thought how funny it would be to pounce him
in the rear:
For Alb had learned him all these tricks. and he
should have his share. RI
The neighbors found old Abner dead down in the
gulch below .-'''. TT
"The goatl The goat!" the farmers cried, " old
Billy now must 60"
But Billy had forestalled his foes he'd eaten of the
His wicked master had prepared upon this fatal
morn.
Those who delight in giving pain will soon or late
be found
Caught in the trap, for others set. as they 90
sneaking round.
COLUMBIA, Mo.