Litchfield enquirer., 1879-06-05
PICKING UP THE PIECES.
A COMEDG.

It $ morning iaa Mrs Meltoe's apartment in Florence. AU the furniture is gathered 5'ato tue middle of tue room. and cOUered aosh c
 sheet. Mrs. Melton $ c sost1oao and 70 longer
 young. Lord Daaolish, scho conaes to cau, has
 also forgotten his yoasth.
 DAwLIsH-G Good morning, Mrs Melton, I
 hope-Hollea There is nobody here. What is all this about? (After some consideration he proceeds to ie-
 Uestigate the extraordinary erection soiM the
 point cf his stiek. 4 fter concincing himself 0f
 its nature he Hfts side of the sheet, pulls out
 aa easy c1tai,, ispects it, and 1i'saly sits o'a
 1)
 She is an extraordinary woman. l don't
 know why I like her. I dont't know why sEe
 likes me. suppose that she does like me. If
 not, what bore I must bel l come here
 every day-and stay. I suspect that am an awful fellow to stay. suppose l ought to go
 now This furniture trophy don't lock like
 being at home to callers. But perhaps she is
 out and then can go on sitting here.
 must sit somewhere. May I smoke? dare
 say; thank ye, I will. Smoke? Smoke | There is a proverb about smoke. 1 wonder
 how came to know so many proverbs. l don't know much s'There is no smoke with | out fire" Yes, that's it. There is uncommon
 little fire in cigarette Little fire and much | smoke. Yes, that's like this-I mean-Let l me-what dye call it ?-review my position.
 Here sit Here I sit every day. That is
 smoke, suppose plenty of smoke. Is there
 any fire? That is the question. l wish peo-
 pie would mind their own business, It is | should think But yet there are people
 there's that Flitterly, for instance e---little | snob. Flitterly makes it the business of his | life to go about saying that am going to be married; and all because here is woman who | is not such an intolerable bore as-as other people, Flitterlv is the sort of man who says | that there is no smoke without fire What IS | this? That is what 1 want to know. Is this
 business of mine all smoke, all cigarette and soda, or-confound Flitterly! wonder if l ought to pull his nose I am afraid that that l sort of thing is out of date. 1 don't think l
 could pull a nose, unless somebody showed me
 how. Perhaps if somebody held him steady,
 might Idont think could do it. He has
 got such a ridiculous little nose. wonder 1T | 1 ought to give up coming here. don Know where I should go to. I wonder If l am
 bound in honor, and all that. Perhaps that is
 out of date too. sometimes think that am
 out of date myself. (Ayfter uis he tisles Wnder | the sheet aoih his st5sk, and brings to light q
 photograph book, aoich he studies Gs he continues | to naedit0te.)
 | wonder if she would take me if l asked | her. don't believe she would ;.she is a most l extraordinary woman. Who is this, 1 won- | der? never saw this book before. I suppose l that this is the sort of man women admire. | He would know how to pull nose. dare say he has pulled lots of noses in his day. | Does it for exercise. Surburban cad. A kind of little Footing lady-killer. I wonder she
 puts such fellow in her book. Why, here he
 is again, twice as big and fiercer. Here is an- | other-and another. Hang him, he is all over l the book.
 Gle pitches the book under the sheet. Then l Mrs. Melton comes ia acearing c long apron,
 aaad armsed aotth duster and tfsat1ler- -6rush) Mrs. MELroN-Lord Dawlish! What are
 you doing here? D.-Nothing. Mrs M-How we'll you do it D.-Thank you. Mrs. M-But you are doing something you
 are smoking. D.-Am 1? beg your pardon. Mrs. M.-And you shall do more; you shall
 help me. have been up to my eyes in work since seven o'clock. D. Seven! Why don't you make some-
 body else do it? Mrs M-Because I do it so we'll have a | genius for dusting, and Italian servants have
 not. In this old city they have an unfeigned l respect for the dust Of ages. D.-Have they? How funny But they
 might help you, should think. Where are
 they? There was nobody to let me in. Where 1 are your servants? Mrs M.-Gone. D.-Gone! Mrs M.-Gone and left me free. packed
 them all off-man and maid, bag and baggage D.-But who will look after you? Mrs MI. l am fully equal to the task. l But come be useful. You shall help me to
 rearrange the furniture. D.-Help! |! Mrs M.-Yes help! You! am not quite 1 sure that you can't GAS he proceeds to 6,.ush the 6ack of c cb0ir,
 it occurs to hiaa to apologize tor Ms intrusion. D.-1 suppose 1 ought to apoligize for con- | ing so early. Somehow found myself in the | Palazzo-and the door of your apartments was open, and so came in. I took the liberty of an old friend. Mrs. MI believe we have been acquainted | for at least Q month. D.-Only month! It is not possible. It 1 must be more than a month. Mrs. M.-Apparently our precious friend ship has not made the time pass quickly. D.-No. mean that it never does pass
 quickly.
 Mrs. M-Work. work, workl It's work l that makes the day go quick. am busy from
 morning till night, and time flies with me. D.-Then you shorten your life. Mrs. M.-And keep it bright. Better one hour of life than a century of existence Dear,
 dear ! how did my best photograph book get knocked down here? D.-I am afraid that that was my awkward
 ness. I was looking at it, and it-it went down there.
 Mrs. Mont let it break from you again. ol-. ;f e;% l> | have no genius for dusting. D.-Nobody ever called me a genius I l have been called all sorts of names; but mo- body ever went so far as to call me genius. Mrs. M.-And you ain't stupid I always | maintain that you are not really stupid. D.-Ain't I? Thank you. Who is this | man-this fine-looking man with the frown and wh iskers?
 Mrs M.-He is handsome, isn't he? D.-I don't know. I am not judge of male | beauty.
 Mrs. M.-Men never admire each other. They are too envious and too vain. D.-Are they And womena What are women?
 Mrs. M.-What are wemen? What are they | not :? Oh for one word to comprehend the sex :! Women are-yes, women are womanly. D.-That sounds true. And women are ef- | feminate.
 Mrs. M.-Only females are effeminate. D.-Oh! wonder what that means Mrs. M.-But John is handsome. Ask any 1 woman.
 D.-John! | Mrs. M.-Yes, that's Johnny cousin l D.-I hate cousins. They are so familiar
 and so personal.
 Mrs. MI like them. They are so-so- | D.-Cousinly. l Mrs. M-Precisely. l D.-Cousins are ceusinly. Does he dye his whiskers?
 | Mrs. Mr.-Dye! Never He has too much
 to do. John is great mana man of will, a
 man of force, man of iron. That's what I call man.
 D.-Do you? don't call an iron man a
 man.
 Mrs. M.-He is the first of American engi- neers
 D.-A Yankee stoker
 Mrs. M.-Dear John He is good fellow.
 He gave me that little jar by your hand