The Lake Charles echo. [volume] (Lake Charles, Parish of Calcasieu, La.) 1876-1898, 1879-04-05
THAT BLESSED BABY.
How a MAN Played Circus with the Little
Darling.

and left her baby with Mrs. Archable to
be taken care of, and it was fitting on
the floor very happy, with playthings
galore, when Henry came in.
"Hello, ole gal made raise, have
you? Phweetl Phweetl Say, young
fellow, how's your collie ?" The baby
made no response of an Ineligible char.
acter, and Eenry sat down and stared
at it.
Babies is queer things, now, amt
they? just see that young imbecile
tryin' to chew up the potato-masher.
Now, he's takin' taste of the stove
litter. That's a fine old moustache
you've made across your mug now, amt
it? & Gosh hellol here, old woman,
quick The young un's swallowed half a
yard of the poker ?'
Henry rescued the poker, and in doing
80 upset the baby and its temper. The
back of its head was bumped, and it
howled, and Henry got thirty-six>
pound lovepat alongside the ear, aud the
baby was upended again, and the kinks
taken out of its temper with poultice of
bread and molasses so quick that the old
man thought he had got into hum
ming-top factory. Then Henry let the
baby alone and looked at the old woman
piekin' chickens. The baby wanted
some Of the feathers, and he reached it 8
handful, half of which it Immediately
spread on the bread and molasses, and
the rest it stuck around its mouth and
smiled through the adornment like a
cock-eyed parrot with the delirium
tremens, but it looked dreadfully happy.
Then it put some feathers in it's mouth,
and rubbed the bread and molasses over
it's bald head, cooed like two weeks old
wife, and next it turned purple all over,
and squirmed till it's face looked like an
old gum boot that had been eating green
persimmons.
!" / don't believe this young one likes
feathers along with his grub," said
Henry, reAectively. and Mrs. A. turned
round On him like volcano that was
sick at the stomach.
Oh ! you wretch !" and he wasn't
sure whether she hit him on the ear or
top OF the head first, it was done so
quick. Then she grabbed up the incipi-
ent Oxtoby and ran her finger down its
throat as though it were stocking, and
she wanted to turn it inside out.
"There," she exclaimed, as she held
up three feathers and waved them men.
acipgly before her bosom's lord, "see
what you've done! For halt nothing at
al I'd ram them down your tool
throat. Here, see if you can hold this
child minute without killing 1t, till l
get q towel," and she pumped the young
one on his knee and went up stairs.
Baby oooed and kicked, and got hold
of Henry's finger, which it inspected with
great care, and then put it in its mouth
then Henry ripped out q signal of dis
tress that scared the baby as stiff as q
telegraph pole.
"Quit hollerin' at that child in that
wsyp shouted Mrs. A. from upstairs.
+" Do you want to scare it to deathT'
"Seare thunder it's me that's asearin'.
'Spose / want my fingers taken off for
liver puddin' and eat by cannibal
baby2"
Then be added to the child: " Here
old fellow, I'll give you something to
chaw on. Pussy, pussy, pussy" and as
he lifted the cat on his lap, the young
one grabbed its tail, inserted it in its
mouth and shut down on it. The cat
swore and spit and sunk about twenty
claws at once into Henry's leg.
"O-u-c7hl Bloody murder Take him
oft" and as the agonized man lesped to
bis feet, he shot baby into the coal
scuttle and kicked the cat over the stove
into the buckwheat cake batter. He
had just opened his mouth tor whole-
sale swear, when be got glimpse of
Mrs. A. descending upon him like day
Of wrath, SO be shot out of the front door,
forgetting that the landlord had taken
away the steps to paint them, and got
through falling when he jammed his
bald head against the board fence on the
other side of the street, in q way that
made his skull flop up and down like
loose half sole in the mud.
When q neighbor came along and set