Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1879-10-18
Humors Of an Election.

III tnls Dlesseu land CT ours, tnat
ought to be collected and put on
record, if for no other purpose than
to illustrate our national character
AS we vote to fill nearly all of the
Offices, mrch of our time is given to
the machinery of the election; and
were it not for the system of conven-
tions, or, as they are more regularly
called caucuses, it is diffou!r 10 80
what would become 0t us. Ne
would have no time for any ut2e.
pursuit but selecting candidates and
voting for them. lid -. So ... ., %
AS it is certain dexterous gentle.
men, who live on politics, and are
called politicians, take this irksome
business out of our hands, and, as
sembling at stated periods for any
and all duly-olg ganized parties, these
gentlemen put would-be official
agents forward in process comically
called nominations, so thst all the
average citizen has to do ia to appear
at the polls, and selecting one OF these
tickets, or, rather, not selecting, but
taking, in accordance with the party
to which he belongs, deposit the tick
ct in the ballot-box.
True, he is almost sure to find on
his ballot the names of mel il whom
he has little or no confidence. and no
respect whatever and he will find
candidates no one of which would he
trust with the collection of fve-dol-
lar claim, who, if elected. are to be
entrusted with the care CT thousands,
and perhaps millions; others again,
! who are to have difficult and deli
cate affairs to manage, whom he
knows could not be given the control
of 2 country ovsr-shot rew-Iaili With
| cut ardapger,ng the safsty Of hit
la,aiiy, and vet, as tAe arrangement
ls for his Convenience, it would be ex-
tremely impolite to grusable or ques-
ton.
True, it is claimed thet the good
citizen could himself attend the cau-
Gus and aid in the selection of the
ticket. Yes man can do this, and
if enough of them are in attendance
at the primaries and do not care
whothec th,ir noses are bloodiod or
their hats smashed over their intel
lsctual couLtenances, they can con-
troll and nominate ss they plesse.
| The advocates of this. however, for
get that the very origin of the caucus
lies in he fact that the ave rage citi-
zen has no time to epare for such a
purpose. The caucus was created
for his convenience aul the good OF
tho politicians: and to break up the
process is to have us drinking bad
whiskey at common bars, while we
make up the tickets, to the neglect
Of our private interests.
Accepting the machine as it is,
there is no limit to the humor of the
thing. A ward politician is precisely
the sort of man the brilliant author
Of the Mighty Dollar selected for his
Hon. Bardwell Slote, M. 9. Thsre
is net much difference between the
NJ. G. and the ward hummer, 60 the
author was not greatly in error. The
ward hummer has red nose and in
famed eyes; for all his principles and
patriotism come from jus q IN
bibes freely, and teir2 furnished
money by the candida w1a as-
pecs to steal enough after their s.s--
ton to moro than replace the money
spent, he treats others to the princi-
pies and patriotism of the jug. These
are as fiery and hot as his nose and
as dim and inhamed as his eyes. In
his so-called mind the people of the
opposite party, making o1e-half Of
the United States, are all rogues and
fools, and he treats them az such ac-
cordingly.
TIE township politician differs lit
tie from the ward hummer. He too
gets his views and impulses from this:
same source, but he is a slower,
stupider and somewhat more con-
servative man. From much sitting
on boxes about corner stores, and
tilted back in split bottom chairs be-
fore tayerns, he is round-shouldered
and croaked-legged, He manages,
however, to have all the rif-raf of
tbs village, all the young farmers
who affect store clothes and drive
buggies, collected at the caucus, and,
although less noisy and less demon
stralive than the ward hummer, he
effects his object, which is the same,
to wit: The selection of the worst
possible mon from the worst possible
social element TO fill the Offices.
| Under the guide Of these patriotic
men we re out in thousands every
vear-end sometimes twice year
to attend public meetings, and hurry
to the polls and vote with the in
tensest anxiety. After this io done
and the whooping ceases, we eettie
back to our daily work, Satisfied tc
leave the Government in the hands
of tho worst possible men in on,
midst.
There arc daily journals and week
ly journals published that have moth
ing under HEAVIER in then but lauda
tions CT their own party and denun
! Citations of their opponents. People
, subscribe and pay for this odd sort o
l literature, and, it is to be presumed
read them. But, es it is the san'