The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1879-03-11
OFFERS OF MARRIAGE
The Experience of Three Young
Ladies.
Atlantic for March,

oheFS VI HdFfldSe she ndh received.
Through such 9uestionings few general
conclusions have been reached, namely,
that every female human has one, every
ordinarily agreeable female human has
from two to four, every extraordinarily
agreeable female human from four to
eight; also under rarely favorable condi-
tions of wealth, beauty, esprit, etc, fe-
male humans may average twelve; under
normal conditions beauty is a slight fac
tor compared with manner. The follow
ing fragments of conversation between
three girls, who met together for the
purpose of relating some of their expert
ences, may substantiate these averages:
Eve must begin" said Graceanna, pa
thetically, "You, Lou, were twenty-five
first Make your story ten minutes long
at least, while | am consolins myself
with this 'bonne bouchc.' A new piece
of candy can be bought every ten min
utes, allowing five minutes for consump-
ton and five for rest. How many offers
have you had? Why are you not mar
ried, Lou Parker?"
because / never had an offer'
The other girls gave low whistle of
astonishment, driven by this unexpected
avowal into masculine demonstration.
Lou blushed and looked extremely guilty,
and the tears almost came, as she ex-
| claimed, halting between the words, q
eally-could-not-help-it," and then ami
mated by sudden impulse of self
respect, 81 don't think it is nice to have
offers. | should not want any man to
come near enough to me to love me, un-
less | loved him"
GLOW can you ever tell that you should
like any one until he has told you right
up and DOWN." asked Maggie, the other
friend.
"We both should feel it, if we did
| like each other; it would somehow be-
tray itself My husband must be my
only lover"
81 don't believe you'll ever have one,
and such lofty ideas make ordinary peo-
pie seem wicked. l feel personally in
suited. Why, I have had-Oh, beg par
don, it is not my turn"
"Ies it is" said Lou, thankful for
chance to escape; "tell all you can"
81 have had two whole and two half
ones. 1t seems too bad to let two of the
men make guys of themselves, because
one was the brother of friend at whose
house | have capital times; 50 it would
have been very inconvenient. And the
other was minister, and thought if he
got discouraged early, it might affect his
preaching; now he takes so many texts
from Solomon's Song that his sermons
are poetical, and don't make people feel
| that they are miserable sinners. Indi-
vidual love and universal love get mixed
up in them, and you can't tell which is
best; if you love an individual you are
Just as sanity as if you loved the Cosmos
alone. So | told them both that | was
prejudiced against marrying, and hated
love-making, and that when l loved a
man would let him know it plainly.
Then you don't like me% said my little
minister No, l DON'T | told him. And
then we both laughed and he looked as
if he had saved himself from jumping off
a precipice. The other-he is a real
splendid man-looked me square in the
eye-saying, in such grave way, If you
mean what you say, Miss Jones, thank
YOU Il do said |, as soemnly as an old
saint But now ] wish | had let it come
to the point, because he is the best of the
whole, and it is disgraceful to be twenty.
five and not even engaged. He went out
to India, soon after, so | am sure he did
like me-" She drew long breath, and
took the biggest piece of candy.
"What did the other two doW ques
toned the two girls eagerly.
"Oh, they were everyday kind of af
fairs. One was in walking; my gentle
men plucked some white-weed and talket
nonsense all the way about his peculiar
nature, and how mine suited his; ant
pulled the flower to pieces, counting
, Isle liebt mich, sic licbt mich nicht,
and held it to me as he came to the las
t petal 'Nicht, nichtp shouted /, and OF
r I ran, and he after me, asking if | were
: in earnest-saying he 'Liebte mich sehr.
: | told him | was, and then he declared
= he would kill himself, and in six month
: he was engaged to somebody else; and
a found out that three months before tina
. walk he had offered himself to two girls
y to one two or three weeks after the frs
had refused him-and had told both tha
he would commit suicide. Another offe
was made by letter. and instead of keep
ing it as cordial for the despondent moo,
y I burnt it as a surety for n good time il
;, the next world. If | am never marie,
,, the reason will not he want Of offers"
= "And if some one should come bac
from India"
:, "Oh, / might indicate the state of m
u mind if | had not GROWN too old to loo
sentimental. Now it is your turn"
"Well, this is fun, but | wish we ha
not made such compact. For my part
/ | could not help 1.-THE offers, meal
+ | like the men, too, but they would pre-
! woke me by saying they had misundel
IS stood me, when, of course they had, an
y very much. 1t made me feel like
d naughty child, who don't know why sh
d is naughty"
e "Don't moralize," said Maggie. clio
many?-that is the point"
"Ten. Four came the first winter
l. was in society; the men were fools
Is think / liked them, because / enjoye
y polkiug with them, and every one ha
since married"
"You should never have seen thel
Alone" said Lou, patronizingly.
,e 81 did not see them alone on purpose,
a replied Graceanna, Indignantly. COR
er of them / never spoke to except whe
ess other persons were present. One was
OF widower, and proposed six times after !
30 30 had seen me, because he thought wou
Is be good disciplinarian unto his famil
One offer was by postal card, and an a