davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17
NO. 500


WILLIAM LLorD GARRISON. Ills charac.
81 Aad thdeasseslS s&Fss4zI st..sss., IL Pm.
itanissl, partly ii his organization, and part.z
y tho result Of being reared Ii 40 Atmosphere
of Galsiiiisui. But though ho was alwav8
stern and Incorporating iii the rebuko 81
wrong, those who knew him well were awafe
Of an undertone Of deep tenderness iii Hi
feeling II was, in fact genuine love
for his fellow.men that rendered him SO sewers
IN his denuuciatons Of oppression. ANY con-
temptuous estimate Of human beings, whether
they were women, negroes, or Chiuese, kind
led his Indignation, and be never paused to
measure the fashion Of his utterance. But
when he encountered a reasonable. manly an
tagonist, no Que could be more courteous IN
debate than he. While travelling on a steam.
boat, lie accidentally fell into conversation
with stranger, who proved to be South
carolinian. The subject Of slavery was all
most Immediately introduced, for ia those
days SoutEeruers were even more alert to vim.
dictate their uectiliar Institution . than tho
aooiitionists were to attack it. Mr.. Garrison.
IN reply to the statements of his COMPANION.
frankly avowed that be was himself an ultras
abolitionist and he went on to explain why
nc thought the abolition of SO bad SYSTEM
would prove equally beneficial to The white
race aud The colored. The Southern gentle-
man listened with apparent interest, and pro-
longed the conversation till the steamboat
landed. At parting, be Said, al am pleased
to have met you. If all the aboitionists were
like you, they would not be such disturbers
Of the peace but as for that violent fellow,
Garrison, who is trying to instgate the slaves
to cut their masters throats. that fellow
Oh bit TO be silenced.n lIr. May, who stood
near, now came forward with bow and q
smile. and said, I" This is Mr.. Garrison."--s
Lydia Maria Child, IN august Atlantic.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

SHORTLY MISSED Ir.--A young woman on
West Adams street, read some time ago of
once silenced presumpiuous youth who was
about to light cigar in her august presence.
" Is smoking disagreeabe to you, madam 2"
said the p. y. /" do not know, sir no one
has ever smoked in my presence" answered
the naughty dame. "That'll be good
thing 10 say some day. said the young wo-
man to herself, and last week she got chance
to ring ID on a gentleman who said to her -
g beg your pardop--is smoking distastefuf
to you Z" =" do not know" she said, with
ineffable stateliness, g no one ever asked me
before"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

HEIGHT or MOUNTAIN RANeEs.--In the
average height Of mountain ranges Switzer-
land does not compare with Colorado, or for
that matter with any Western Territory
The mean height Of the Alps is from eight to
niue thousand feet above the sea. The mean
height Of the Rocky Mountains is from ten to
twelve thousand feet. 1t is probable that
the average height 10 Colorado, which is the
tabie-land Of the continent, viii approach
very nearly 10 twelve thousand feet!
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

Snow CusTARp.-- Beat eight eggs, leaving
out The whites Of four add tbemto one quart
of milk and five ounces Of sugar; have slal
low pan Of hot water in the oven, set the dish
into it and bake till the cuslard is thick then
take it out and set away to cool beat the re.
naming whites very light, add half pound
Of sugar gradually and teaspe6nful Of lemon
jnice. When The cnstard IS cold lay the
whites over the tops IN heaps, but do not let
them touch.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

The philosopher says, life is but a span.''
But az the rate some Of the young fellows are
going through it we should remark that they
must have seven or eight horses hitched to
them Elmira Gasette.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

If you were as willing to be as pleasant and
as anxious 10 please in your own home as you
are in the company Of your neghbors, YOU
would have the happiest home in the world.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17
POETRY.
SEPTEMBER.

The golden rod is yellow;
The corn Is turning brown;
The trees IN apple orchards
With fruits are bending down.
81 The gentiah's hlucst frinees
Are curling Ia the SUM-
In dusty pods the miikweed
Its hidden silk has spun.
The sedges faint their harvest
In every meadow nook;
And asters by the brookside
y Make asters by the brook.
From dewy lanes At morning
The grapes sweet odors rise;
at noon the roads all futter
With yellow butterflies.
BY all these lovely tokens
September days are here.
With Summers best of weather
And Autumn's best of cheer
But none Of all this beauty
Which floods the earth and air
IsuntO me the secrst
Which makes September fair.
IT'S a thing which I remember;
To name ii thrills me yet;
One day OF one September
never can forget.
N H. IN Scri5aer for Sepiemb
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

eff there's m moonlight, win you meet me-
by gasiight. dearest Juliana = g No, Az
gustus, WON'T replied she 9 Pm nd o,.
meter. III Boston Globo.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

The flea, says the Boston Transcript. is the
politician of the insect world. He isever itch
ing for place. creates no end Of disturbance,
and yoa never know where to find him.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

Work is the weapon Of honor. and he who
lacks the weapon viii never triumph.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

1t is easy to pick holes in other peoples
work, but far more profitable to do better
work yourself.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

The following unique epistle Was picked
up in the street at Raritnn on Tuesday last
+. Dear Bill:-The reason didn't laff when
yu hft ad me in the post offs yesterday was
becaws hev a bile on my face, and kant laff
she'll burst. But luy yu Bill, bile or no bile.
lafr or no laff. Yure loyin' Kate, till deth."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

What is weed "a plant whose virtues
have not yet been discovered.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

There is nothing that SO refines the face
and mind as the presence Of good thoughts.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

f. Control your desires as the first step toward
enrtailinc expenses.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

The pen, says the Boston Courier, may be
mightier than the sword, but it does not rat
tie around the heels of a militia colonel so
vigorously Or trip him UP SO gracefully as the
sword does.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

A friend and neighbor had a son who is so
quick at repartee that it isa little dangerous
10 cross swords with him. IIo was out riding
with his father the other day, when noting
the name of a street, ho asked If it was not
named for Mr.. b., well known but not
altogether popular citizen. = BY no means,'
said the father, . it was not named for him;
but for his father, who was very popular and
very much esteemed" The son said nothing,
so his father who thought he saw a chance to
preach little sermon, continued Its
very apt to be so. A boy has father whom
everybody loves and respects for his good
qualities and abilities, but in too many cases
The boy don't amoant to anything Said the
boy, after pause, /" Your father was very
much esteemed wasn't he, sir "
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1879-09-17

.aHf
Abraham Lincoln was very fond Of Dan
Rice, who visited the White House frequently
during the gloomy years from 1861 to 1866
Once while the President was enjoying the
clowns jokes, pompous Massachusetts, man
was announced. The new conner bore set
of resolutions condemnatory Of the adminis-
tration policy. Listening attentiyely to tho
preliminary remarks. the Boston gentleman,
Lincoln took the paper but without making
any reply to the contents or the comments,
said . Beg pardon, Mr.. -- but before
we proceed further, let one introduce to you
my particular friend, Mr.. Dan Rice" Dan
stood up aud delivered his best bow, but the
committeeman was struck dumb with amaze
ment and indignation. To be introduced to a
circus clown by tho President Of the United
States was too much for him. He grew red
in the face, stared first at one and then at the
other, and at last managing to stammer out
few works of leaYestaking, departed in haste.
AS the door closed upon HIM Lincoln turned
to Rice with hearty laugh and said Dan,
wasn't that well done9 Didn't 1t take the
wind out of him nicely p
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24

ers are seated on carpets, each in his lit
tie niche, for the shops are inches two
yards wide, one yard and halfin depth
They show me rings, turquoises, emer-
aids, rubies in framework of silver. Fur
clad merchants offer you skin of lambs
taken from them when born. Then there
are carpets manufactured by the turco-
mans, those nomad highwaymen, whom
found Colonel Avinoff sweeping from
the road to Khiva with single battalion,
and of whom the Emir's $4,000 soldiers
were powcrless to rid the country.
Some years ago, whenever a. stranger
visited Bokhara, the Emir would send
him to the bazaar and invite him to
choose costly object. If the stranger
offered to pay the Emir's officers objected
and said that his master would settle
with the merchant. The Emir used to
cut off the merchants head. So as soon
as stranger came near the bazaar, the
dealers would scuttle away and the shops
be closed. They now have changed all
that. A foreigner draws the crowd in.
stead of repelling it. Moreover the Emi1
lent us an expert, who set the true prices
on everything we examined. The dealers
seem to be perfectly content with this
arrangement. So we left the bazaar and
repaired to the fortress, where VIC were
received by functionary whose sole
function is to fire cannon at noon. He
offered us pilan and a little music. Hav.
ing discussed both make preparations
for a visit Of farewell to the Emir, fortify.
ngTmysclf for more pilsn, more presents
more horses, more dressing gowns.
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24
Josh Billings Advice to the "Quire''
Singer.

The 1st thing to do to make good
quire singer is to gigle little. Put up
your hair in curl papers every Friday
mite, so as to have it in good shape Sun
day morning. If'your daddy is rich you
can buy some store hair; if he is very rich
buy some more and build it high upon
your head; then git high priced bonnet
that runs up very high, at the high part
OF it, and git the milliner to plant some
high artafshels into the highest part of
1T. This will help you sing high, as So
prano is the highest part.
When the tune is give out, don't paw
attention to it, and then giglc. Giglc a a
good decl.
Whisper to the girl next you that En-
Jones, which sets on the second sect from
the front on the left-hand side, has her
bunnit trimmed with the same color cx-
act she had last year. and then put your
book to your face and gigle.
Object to every tune unless there is a
solow into it for the sophrano. Coff and
ham good dccl before you begin to sing.
When you sing shake the artafshels off
your bunnit, and when you come to a
high tone brace you rself back a little
twist your head to one side and open
your mouth the widest on that side, shct
the eye on the same side Jest a triphle.
and then put in for dear life. .''
When the preacher gifts under hed-way
with his preachin', write note onto the
blank leaf into the fourth part of your
note book. That's what the blank was
made tor: Git sumbody to pass the
note to sumbody else, and you watch
them while they read it and then gigle.
Ii anybody talks or lafs in the con-
gregashun, and the preacher takes notis
OF It, that's good chance for you to gig
gle, and you ought to gigle great deal.
The preacher darsent say anything to
you bekaus you are in the quire.: If you
had bow before you went into the quire.
give. him the mitten-you ought to have
somebody better now.
Don't forget to CYCLE.
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24

very little sentiment in the mind of the
true Yankee countryman. His utteran-
ces are sometimes solid to a ludricious
degree. A father said to an old acuuain-
tance who came to condole with him on
tina unmanageableness of his two sons
who had committed burglary in the
next town. and had both been sentenced
to prison: ut is pretty rough on me to
have them both go to onct, but there is
one thing to it-whch 1t comes night
now YOU know where them boys Be-"
Of several New Es bnSlaRd b2uSsgsd faf%efs n1%s
from the Paris exposition, scotch
man used to air his knowledge every day.
Talking one day about the ravages of
blackbirds and crows in the cornhclds,
the Scotchman asked why they did not
dress bale of straw up like man to
frighten them away. "Well," said one
of the farmers, '|that is ingenious, but it's
nothing compared with the article I've
been. over to Paris to get patents on.
Did you ever here Of Gen. Lconidas
Brownlow's double back action, anti
friction, rcar-propeller crow -scarer?
NOo>tAASt7o3 AV1 CilC
II never heard of it. What is that?
"Why,'' said the farmer, "its such an
ettecicnt machine that when the crows
and blackbirds sec 1t work they not only
get away as quick, but it scares them so
that they hurry to bring back what
they've stolen beforer' A well known
public man in Main, some twenty-five
yeafs ago used to tell this story: He
found one time, that he had two or three
days to spare, and inquired of the hotel
clerk where he could find some shooting.
A country-man stood near by said ne
fought to go out on the Scarborough road
about six miles over the. bridge, and he'd
find pair of bars on the lcft-hand side
Put the bars up again, because the
critters might get out, then
go up the hill, and that will
bring you out right by the old Squire
Risley's barn, and like enough hell be
around there himself; he's most always
around" II dou't know Squire Risley,"
said the stranger, land don't know his
barn from any other barn." "Oh," re-
piled the .countryman, "you'll know him
the minute you set eyes on him. Every
body knows him. He'll have ON nankecn
trowscrs at this time of the season Of the
year. His wife makes them for him, out
of piece he took for bad debt. And
when you see him once you know him,
for he's pleats all over-that's the way
his wife makes them. He's like the
morning slln-all rays"
In a Vermont village a tall and awk-
ward beau called to see his young lady,
and found her engaged with other COM
pany: To set matters right he gave them
riddle. "There was two boys playin'
on the sidewalk, and "a man asked them
whether they were any relation. The boy
replied: "Sir, that boys mother and mine
was twin sisters, and yet we amt cous-
ms" The girls guessed at it for half an
hour and gave it up. "Is there any solu-
ton to it, Mr.. BROWNE" onc of the girls
asked: "Oh, yes," be replied, 'it's easy
explained - that boy lied.' d.'-ARrHUR
GILMAN in Commonwealth.
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24

A young English statistician who was
paying court to young lady thought to
surprise her with his immense erudition
Producing his notebook, she thought he
was about to indite a love sonnet, but
was slightly taken aback by the follow
ing question::
"How many meals do you eat?"
"Why, three, of course, but of all the
oldest questionsr'
"Never mind, dear, I'll tell you all
about it in moment"
His pencil was rapidly at work. AT
last fondly clasping her slender waist:
"Now, my darling, I've got it, and if
you wish to know how much has passed
through that adorable little mouth in the
last seventeen years, I can give you the
exact figures"
"Goodness! Gracious! What can YOU
mean?"
'Now, just isten," says he, ssand YOU
will hear exactly what you have been
obliged to absorb to maintain those
charms which are to make the happiness
of my, life" ...>.
"But don't want to hear"
: ''Ah, you are surprised no doubt, but
statistics are wonderful things. Just lis
ten: You are seventeen years old. so
that in fifteen years you have absorbed
oxen or calves, 5; sheep and lambs, IA;
chickens, 1927; ducks, 204; geese 10: tur.
keys, 100; game of various kinds, 1924;
fishes, 100; eggs, 8, 1874 vegetables (bunch-
esq, 700; fruit baskets), 603; cheese, t02;
bread, cake, &c. lin sacks of flour). 40:
wine, (barrels), IL; water (gallons),
$1,000"
At this the maiden revolted, and iumn-
ing up exclaimed:
81 think you are very impertinent, and
disgusting besides, and I will not stav
to listen to you'll" upon which she flew
into the house.
He gazed after her with an abstracted
air, and left, saying to himself.
eff she kept talking at that rate
twelve hours out Of twenty -four, her laws
would in twenty years travel distance
of 1882, 1874 miles,
;. The maiden, within two months. mar
:ried a well.to-do Igrocer who was no sta
tistician.
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24
YELLOW FEVER.

MEMPHIS, June 1S. The yellow fever
is again becoming worse. All trains going
out late last night were crowded, and many
more are leaving today. White majority Of
the physicians do. not apprehend that the
fever will rage in an epidemic, form, they all
advise those who can to leave the city. The
westheris warm and sultry7 after a thunder
storm last night. Three new eases were re.
ported to the board Of health this; afternoon.
these make Is as the total number of cases re.
ported since the 9th inst, Fred Eckers, who
was reported this morning, died at / this
afternoon, and was buried Immediately after
wards. Total number Of deaths from fever to
date is seven, including the death this after
noon. Business is almost entirely suspended.
especially the wholesale merchants. large
crowds of citizens. are leaving on every train
that departs from The city. The. Manhattan
and Emmett banks closed their doors TO-DAY.
leaving their collections and deposits to the
care Of other banks 4 detachment OF the
Chickasaw Guards and Bluff City Greys leave
tonight for Clarksville, Tenn, where both
companies will 60 into camp Mrs. Robert
Hester and one of her children are reported in
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24

critical condition. The other members of
the family are progressing lfavorably Quar-
antlne regulations are again being rfgidly en-
forced against Memphis, at various points.
MEMPHIS, July 19-The weather is
warm and sultry with occasional showers
The development Of new cases has given fresh
impetus to the exodus of citizens, and another
genuine stampede is in progress. Business is
paralyzed, and many retail merchants are
closing their stores. In New Orleans strict
quarantine is enforced against Memphis Up
to this date it is declared that there has not
been case Of yellow fever in New Orleans
this season. Movements are being made in
Louisville, KY, and in St. Louis, NO.. against
the Introduction Of the scourgc, and in the lat
ter city, especially, much alarm is manifested.
MEMPHIS, July 20.-The yellow fever
is on the increase. len new cases are report
ed to-day. A member Of the board of health
says the outlook is bad. The people continue
to close their places of business. Full 1000
people have left the doomed city since yester
day noon. City officials and physicians urge
upon all citizens who can to leave at once
The Memphis g. Paducha railroad closed run
ing TODAY. .
MEMPHIS, July 21.-There were thirty
six new cases of yellow fever reported to-day
There seems to be no doubt that it is becoming
epidemic, and every one is leaving the city
who Gun get away.
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24
A Broken Heart.

Miss Prince was the only daughter OF
Pittsburg merchant, and two years ago
was welded to Mr.. Savage, Of Baltimore
Six hours after the ceremony the, train
upon which they had started on thei1
bridal tour was wrecked, and the hus-
band Of less than day was killed. The
shock OF the terrible calamity robbed the
young wife for a time Of her reason.
From this mental death she recovered to
go into slow decline. All the blossoms
of her life were whitening, and the world
once: so ,robed in beauty and delight be-
came prison from which her spirit long
ed to be free. They took her across the
sea, but the panorama of scene and Incl
dent had no power to renew the love 7ot
life, and the young thing faded as flow
er fades. At last they took her to the
south of France, and there amid the
bloom of flowers on the spot where
Petrarch once sang songs to Elvira-in
the home Of Leonardo da Vinci's exile
this fair American girl found the peace.
full quiet of the grave. Our correspond
ent who relates the incident draws a
vivid picture of the sorrowing family
around the death-bed: The father over
iwhelmed with grief, the mother Wild
with despair, while a young sister clasp
ing a hand Of the, dying girl looks with
pallid face and rigid lips into the glazed
eyes. =: -:
"Ihe anguish is nearly oyer-my race
OF life is done,". came in a feeble intona-
ton from the lips Of the dying. ,*
= .'And you are willing to 3die?". asked a
minis minister, bending low to catch the whis-3 ii =
i ooh, so glad! Listen to me. I die ais
many Of my sex have done, of a broken
heart. l had put my all of life and hope
on the hazard of an earthly love, and
God has smitten me for my SIM
'It was no sin to love.''
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24
A Palpable Hit.

Not long ago, III country town, bar
ristcr was examining a lady witness, who
would talk, and who would not let any of
the lawyers bubbles get the better of
her. The forensic advocate grew iratc
at the old ]ady's loquacity, and, as she
stepped down after her badgering, re-
marked, "You see, your Honor, these OLD
women will talk. They are very trouble
some, and will waste the time of the
court" His Honor looked up, relieved
himself with one Of his peculiar sighs,
and replied, "Ah, Mr.. -, there are
rapidly increased, till we were in a ma
jority, and discovered that no lady who
arrived after did had removed her hat!
Now, that is what call politcncss'
Little Falls transcript., 1879-07-24
of Course He Could Do It.

"Ncw bennet! new bohnet! $12 for i
new :bonnet?'' exclaimed Mr.. Slick, the
other evening, as his wife suggested 8
change from the winter STYLE
eyes, only $12," she humbly replied.
"TWelve dollars for a bonnet is q con
founded outrage, and I know it," he went
on. ''Why, I can buy two silk hats fo,
that money and have some strawber1,
change left. It's dead swindle to ask
$12 for bonnetl'
"Wcll, 1can't do any better, Mr.. Slick
That's the price, and / must pay OF g,
Without
"You don't know how to buy-that,s
what ails you?" he growled. 1.IIl be,
money can buy $19 bonnet for So. It's
all In knowing how to handle the sa les
men,"
II wish you'd try it." she suggested.
IL will, by George, I will! TIL bring
up, anew bonnet in the morning, and
I'll get it for four dollars cheaper thar
you dare top
Mr.. Slick was as good as his word. HI
went into millinery store the next after.
noon with his teeth all sharpened
and with the idea in his mind that every
bonnet in the store was priced at exactly
$12. He looked around little, selected
bonnet that pleased him, and, pointing
his cane at it and calling up his deepest
voice he inquired: =:
The woman flushed, looked from the
bonnet to the man, and was trying to re-
ply, when he said:
"These are not the times for outrageous
prices, and all the buyer realize it.. III
give you $8 for that bonnet and not 8
cent more'' y"
''That-that bonnet-""
Eight dollars and no more,'' he inter
rupted; and she put the article into 8
box and took his money.
"What:d l tell my wife, eh?" he whisp.
cred, as he went out. II tell you it takes
man to buy goods, no matter whether
its fence posts or paper cambric.''
When he sat down at home and took
the cover off the box and held up the
bonnet, Mrs. Slick inquired:
elbow much did she charge you?''
eight dollars, madam; while vol
would have paid $12.
"Richard!' she said, as she tried tt
laugh all over at once. II was with the
lady next door when she ordered tha
bonnet for her cook, and the price was tc
be 81. You see, it"