The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1879-06-06
P 0 z r r Y.
THE L1aHTN1Ne-RoD DISPENSER,
A FARM BALLAD.

1t the weary world is willing, I've little word TO sa
| OF a ightning-rod dispenser that dropped down OF
me one day,
With poem in his motion, with sermon in hi
! mein,
With hands white as lilies, and face uncommon
clean,
No wrinkles had his yestments and his linen gisten
ed white.
And his newconstlucted necktie was an interesting
sight;
Which almost wish his razor had made red that
white-skinned throat,
And the new-constructed nccktie had composed a
hangman's knot,
Ere he brought his sleektrimmed carcass for my wo.
men folks to see,
And his rip-saw tongue hnGzin for to gouge cash
in me.
But couldn't help but like him-as always think /
must.
The gold of my own doctrines in fellow-heap of
dust:
When l fired my own opinions at this person, round
by ronnd,
They drew an answering volley of very similar
sound;
touched him on religion, and the hopes my heart had
known;
He said he'd had experiences quite similar to my own
told him of the doubtins that made dark my early
years.
He had laid awake till morning with that same old
breed of fears.
1 told him of the rough path hoped to heaven to
go;
He was on that very ladder. only just round below.
told him OF my visions of the sinfulness of gain;
He had the self-same picters, though quite
so clear and plain.
Our politics different, and at first he CALLED and
WINGED;
But l arg'ed him so able, he was very soon con-
unced.
And twas getting toward the middle of a hungry
summer day;
There was dinner on the table, and asked him would
hestay?
And he sat down among us everlasting trim and
neat,
And asked short crisp blessing almost good enough
Then he fired UP the mercies of Great Eternal
And gave the Lord Almighty good, frst-class rec
ommend; .--
And for full hour listened to tine sugarcoated
scamp,
Talking like blessed angel-eating like a-blasted
tramp.
My wife, she liked the stranger smiling him warm
and sweet;
TT always fatters women when their guests are on
theeas -
And he limited that some ladies' never lose their early
charms
And kissed the newest baby and received ii in his
arms.
Ny sons and daughters liked him. for be had progress
sive views
And chewed the quill of fancy, and gave down the
latest news;
md couldn't help but like him-as fear always
must,
'he gold of my own doctrines in fellow-heap of
dust.
lie was spreading desoation through piece of apple
pie,
yhen he paused, and looked upon US with tear in
his off eye,
md said-"o, happy family! your blessings make
Tou call to mind the dear ones that in happier days
had;
\ wife sweet this one babe as bright and
little girl with rnglets, like that one there.
worshped them too blndly! my eyes with love were
iod took them to his own heart, and now worship
Him.
Iut had not me- slected the means within my way,
hen they might still be living, and loving me to-
day.
One night there came tempest: the thunder peals
were dire;
he clouds that ramped above us were shooting bolts
of fire;
q my own house, 1, lying, was thinking. to my
blame,
low little had guarded against those shafts OF
flame.
Vhen crash through roof and ceiling the deadly
lightning cleft,
nd killed my wife and children, and only was
left
Since that dread time I've wandered, and nought
for life have cared,
ave to save others loved ones, whose lives have yet
been spared
ince then. it is my mission, whereer by sorrow
tossed,
o sell to virtuous people good lightning -rods-at
cost
With sure and strong protection I'll clothe your build
ings DER,
rwiIlco you fifty dollars [perhaps trife morel,
That little else it comes to at lowest price 11lput
Tou signing this agreement to pay 30 much per
footl.'
signed it, while my family all approving stood
about,
nd dropped tear upon it-[but it didn't bct it
outi1
hat very dag with wagons came some me. both great
and small;
hey climbed upon my buildings just if they owned
'em ALL
hey hacked 'em ard they hewed sem much against
my loud DESIRES
hey trimmed them up with gewgaws, and they bound
'em down with wires
hey trimmed em and they wired EN-, and they trim
med and wired em still,
md every precious minute kept a-rnnnine up the
bill.