The comet. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1877-1882, 1879-06-21
WESTERN STYLE.
Two Samples of Pacific Coast Thun'
der-The Mules Address and Kear.
ney's-Dennis SuTpasses Himself
Them asses and the HeII-bOund
vnllIans.

Them asses and the HeII-bound
VnllIans.
The following, under the caption of
the Sandlot," appeared recently in the San
Fransisco Argonaut, and attracted great at
tention in San Francisco and throughout
California
My FELLow-AssEs Owing to the alb
sence of your long-eared and brazen-lunged
orator, who is now travelling through the
State in the kindly endeavor to teach the
American people the sort of laws they ought
to adopt and the kind of!men they ought to
elect to administer them, have been in
duced to fill his pulpit for a Sabbath day IS
discourse. While I intend to be entirely
| courteous, and to avoid the vile and ribald
| language which you are accustomed to hear,
| shall indulge myself in the use of plain
talk within the comprehension of the most
stupid donkey of you all, and perhaps en-
deavor to stir your thoughts with some
sharp cuts of Saxon speech, which, if you
will carefully consider, will do you no end
of good
What is it of which you complain ? What
have we as American citizens done to you
that we ought not to have done? How is it
that you, citizens by adoption, clothed
with the prerogative of American nation
ality, have arrayed yourselves in opposition
to our country and our laws? Why is it
that every Sabbath day now for more than
a year, in rain and sunshine, IN heat and
cold, you have come here to the same sand
lot to hear American citizens and American
institutions abused, vilifed, denounced and
threatened?
Do YOU remember the condition from
which you fled in your native lands Do
you forget that in Prussia OF Ireland, for
the utterance of your incendiary language,
you would be punished by Imprisonment
and fine? Do you recognize that while
this is land of freedom and free speech, 1t
is still land of law? If you had staid at
home, you Germans would have been COM
pelled, in the interest of the German En-
pire, to have served in the army. Do you
Irishmen understand that if you had staid
in your native land you would have enjoy
ed no right to make laws, and no right to
break them except at the penalty OF the
tread-mill ? And all you foreigners, of
whatever European nationality, you may
be, have you forgotten that in your own
country you were but peasants, compelled
to labor for inadequate wages, and only
permitted to denounce authority at the
peril of your lives and liberties? ? There,
you were serfs, landless, propertyless and
hopeless of advancement. Here, you are
freemen, sovereigns, clothed with political
power, and in your Ignorance and base In
gratitude you are shamefully betraying the
confidence that has been placed in you, and
returning with the most vile and unprin-
cipled acts the kind things that have been
done you. You were starving upon mad"
equate wages in your native lands, and we
gave you such compensation as no other
country has paid to laborers. You were
ignorant, and our common schools were
thrown freely open to you and your child
ren, and in our night schools we teach
your adults our schools from our prl-
maries to our highest universities of
learning are open to your children.
If you profess religion, we ask of you no
questions concerning it. You may worship
as you please, Christ, the God, the sun,
the oaks, the Pope. the tablets of your an
cestors, the white bull, Budha, Mohammed,
the Grand Lama of Thibet, or the devil.
We put no restraint on your conscience If
you have any. We give you equal protec-
ton of our laws; we defend you In our |
courts. If sick, we take you to our free
asylums; if criminal, we welcome you to
our prisons. We have no property entail
ed from your acquisition, We have no :
laws of primogeniture; no laws that place I
traps and spring guns if you poach for fish |
or game. We have millions of free acres
of Government domain which we invite |
30 11ritbpI1t 11nUOOpOt |
Our mines are open TO your labor. No
vocation is closed to you. The highest
political honors are within your reach
When you die you may transmit your accu-
mutations to alien heirs. If there are any |
wrongs in the enactment or execution of
the laws, we offer you the electoral urn,
and give YOU equal voice with the native
born to correct and remedy them. That
all this is true you know. Look about
you in our community, you Catholics.
Look TO your clergy. your churches, their
millions of accumulated wealth. Look to
the Jesuit college, on Market street, and
the other palace of learning and religious
now being erected on Van Ness
avenue; church spires on every side; your
schools and institutions of higher
culture. You Irish and Germons, look to
your savings banks, with nearly $3.50, 900, 900
Of deposits; to the bankers, bonanza kings,
Senators Governors, State
official, leading merchants, prominent busl-
ness men, honored and honorable citizens,
who under our laws and the general hospi-
lality of our political and social system,
nave attained wealth, honor and honorable
positions. How does it happen that there
ne to-day in San Francisco fifty thousand
wealthy, honorable and respect
lble citizens of foreign birth in the enjoy
nent of their homes, their churches, their
clubs and their innocent recreations at
rural pic-nics, and you two, or three, or
four thousand discontented, grumbling,
political malcontents are
down here among the heas upon the
sand d-lot, cursing God, the Constitution,
md the American people thar you have
lad bad luck? l will answer you and you
nay kick back with all the malevolenee of
rour ignorant heads and your malicious
leels.
You are an idle, drunken, worthless,
,agabond lot. You drink too much beer
You hang about corner groceries, and You
play pitch and seven up for whiskey.
You are worthless ward politicians. You
Gamble in widest stocks. You waste your
i -cs pursuing demAgogues who are more ;
worthless than yourselves, more idle, more ,
gnorant, more selfish, and more criminal. {
If you would go to work, there is plenty of {
work to do. If you will stop drinking ,
whisky, give up Chinese cigars, save your
money, follow your wives advice, stay at
home nights, and 60 to church onlSundays,
you can save money, buy homestead, be-
come independent, educate your children,
and by sobriety, industry and economy be I
come honored aud respectable American