American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1879-10-25

all went for nothing but to feed the ex.
travagance and recklessness of my evil
genius. Tortured by remorse, 1 made
many struggles to free myself from the
evil connection that blighted my life,
but in vain, when death lifted the
shadow from my path. The unhappy
woman died and was free. l felt like
a new man. The glowing hopes that
had been smothered revived. l worked
hard and prospered. l made money
and saved it, making occasional remit
tances to the family at home, who were
overjoyed to hear from me after so long
and guilty silence.
81 had learned to gamble, of course,
but now |, resolved to quit it. For two
years l kept this resolution, and had in
the meantime saved over $4,000. Do
you believe that the devil tempts men
| willtell you it is true. 1 began to feel
a strange desire to visit my old haunts.
l yielded, and found my way to n well
known gambling hell, where lost every
dollar of my hard-earned money. My
self-contempt was complete. l sneaked
to my lodgings, feeling that had some
how parted with my manhood as well as
my money.
1.-The very next day was surprised
by the offer of. lucrative subordinate
position in a Federal office in San Fran
cisco. This was not the first coincidence
Of the sort in my life where an unex-
pected influence had been brought to
bear upon me, giving my plans and
prospects new direction. Has God
any thing to do with these things, or is
it accident? took the place which was
offered to me, aud worked With renewed
hope and energy. made a VOW against
gambling and determined to regain all
had thrown away. l saved every
dollar possible, pinching myself in
my living, and .supplementing
my liberal salary by literary Ia
bors. My savings had again run
high up in the thousands and my gains
were steady. The Frazer River mining
expedition broke out. An old friend of
mine came to me and asked the loan of
500 to help him off to the new mines.
1 told him he should have the. money
and that 1 would have it ready for him
that afternoon. After he left the thought
occurred to me that 800 was very
poor outfit for such an enterprise, and
that he ought to have more. Then the
thought was suggested-yes, sir, it was
suggested-that l might take the hun
bred dollars to a faro-bank and win an
other hundred to place in the hand of
my friend. was fully resolved to risk
not cent beyond this. We went to-
gether, and, after alternate successes
and losses at the faro-table, it ended in
the usual way !; I lost the hundred dol
lars. The old passion was reused again.
A wild determination to break the faro
bank took hold upon me. 1 went night
after night, betting recklessly, until not
a dollar was left. This happened last
week. Can. you wonder that L have
concluded that there is no hope for as
weak fool as amp Now, sir, candid
", don't you think that the best thing
l can do is to blow out my brains?" said
he, cooking the pistol as he spoke :
The thought occurred to me that it
was nosuncommon thing for the suicidal
to give way to the homicidal mania.
The man was evidently hall mad, and
ready for tragedy. - IL
'How old are you?" asked, aiming
to create a diversion.
&c am 49," he answered, apparently
brought to little more recollection of
himself by the question.
! 81 should think" 1 continued, hav-
ing arrested his attention, 6. that what
ever may have been your follies, and
however dark the future you have to
face, you have too much manhood, to
sneak out of life by the back door of
suicide"
The shot struck. In an instant a
change passed over his countenance.
Suicide appeared to him in new light
as cowardly, not heroic act. That
was all gone; the suicide was but a poor
creature, weak as well as wicked. He
was saved.
I" You should be ashamed of yourself,
sir,'' continued; "you are only As
years old; you are in perfect health,
with almost a giants strength, class
ical education, extensive business ex-
perience, land with a knowledge of life
by your very mistakes that should be
guarantee against the possibility of their
repetition. A brave man should never
give up the battle-the bravest men
never give up.''
He said quietly: 81 will not act the
part of coward. You will hear from
me again. Good morning.
did hear from him again. He went
to British Columbia, where he prospered
in business and got rich, and became
pillar in the church Of which his father
was one of the great lights. He COM
mitted not suicide, but matrimony, mar
rying sweet and cultured English girl,
who thinks her tall Yankee husband the
and noblest of men.
- ~ D,c6 fonH n-ov<f.