National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1879-09-01
WOMAN, spare that teal
Touch not Il single cupl
In youth II tempted thee.
But now, oh ! give IL up.
! know thy mothers hand
First put II to thy lip;
But, woman, let II stand,
Unless ii be Il CNtnipl


Unless 1t be catnipl
EYES first outfit was Fall costume.
THE latest slang is You're Mississippi Of
q fellow"
OUR striving against nature is like holding
n weather-cock with ones hand as soon as the
force is taken oil it yeers again with the wind.
"IF Lincoln had not died" exclaimed a
political orator, "what would he have been
to-day ?" "Alive," sadly ventured thin
looking man on a back seat, and tho tide Of
eloquence was momontarly checked.-Bur-
liHgt0H Harkeye.
"DoNT sit so far away from mo, Harry,
dear" she said to her lover while they were
steaming up tho river with the eScursion
"don't sit SO far away and turn your back to
me in that way people will think wore mar.
ried."
NINE. X enters the chamber of her colored
waiting.maid while the Abigail is at her toilet.
"Mercy mo, what is thaH' she says, pointing
to box inscribed Lampblack for complex
ION" "Oh, that's my pearl powder Imported
VT
He was plain old granger, and when his
son informed him that he had determined to
go to college and learn something, tho old gen.
temau looked straight at him and said: Now,
look a,hore, John, you may learn rendin', writ
I'M spellin', arithmetic, and n little Biography,
but if you grapple with any o them there dead
langwidges III kill you when you come home,
so they'll do you some sood."-NoriStO'oa
Herald.
A SMALL boy with big cent in his hand
stood before u Michigan avenue grocery for
long time before making up his mind to onter.
When asked what he desired, he inquired
" If boy should como here aud get trusted
for u stick of gum, how much would II beT
zone cent" was the reply. And If a boy
should come here with the cash, how much
Iva T,taf I,a
guess I'll get trusted" quietly remarked the
hnancier as he slipped tho cent down into his
poclSet.-Det Free Press.
THE man who handed in tho following itom
was bruiser, or 1t would never see the light
of day through this paper; Arc you tired,
my rose?" he asked, as she came into the room
with flush on her check and breathing hard.
" On, not tired" she replied, "only blown"
In Justice to our subscribers we will explain
that it was the intention to have the joke on
rose, full-blown rose, we believe, or some'
thing of the sort, As wo remarked before, he
was powerful man, aud he said he would call
again for u copy of tho paper.-Rocsestsr Demo-
Crdt
The following marriage announcement from
the advertising columns Of the official Vienna
journal, illustrates somewhat eOmically tho
Intensity of the title worship that obtains at
the present day in Central Europe Camille
Heinrich, Realm Prince of Starhensberg,
Count of sehaumburg and Waxenhein, Impe-
rial Royal Chamberlain, Colonel Hereditary
Territorial Marshal in Upper aud Neither
Austria, Hereditary Member of the Austrian
House of Peers, Imperial Royal Lieutenant on
tho retired list, and Sophie, Realm Princess of
Starhcnsberg, born Realm Countess ofsickingen'
Hohenburg, Lady OF the Palace to llor Majesty
the Empress. Elizabeth Of Austria, hereby
make duo announcement Of the proNimate
wedding of their daughter, Marie, Realm
Countess of Starhensberg with the Highly
Born Realm Count Conrad Ungnad of Weisson-
wolff, Baron of sonneck aud Ensock, Honorary
Knight of tho Sovereign order of st. John.
Colonel Hereditary Territorial Court Master
in Austria above the Fun, son Of the Highly
Born Lady Hedwig, Realm Countess Ungnad
of WeissenwoliI, born Realm Countess
Krasoka, Lady OF the Star Cross Order, aud Of
hor lato consort, Realm Count Guidobald
Ungnad of WessenwolG," Such names as
those would cover quite good sized door plate