davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1879-12-16
Profitable Patients.

The most wonderful and marvellous
success, in cases where persons are sick
or wasting away from a condition of
miserableness, that no one knows what
ails hem,-profitable patients for doc
tors-is obtained by the use of Hop Bit
ters. They begin to cure from the first
dose, and keep it up until perfect health
and strength are restored. Whoever is
afflicted in this way need not suffer,
when they can get Hop Bitters. See 9TH
er column. 500.
The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1879-12-16

MTE RECENTLY heard an interest
w ing anecdote by which one can
deduce novel and adorn it into tale,
of how second thought so often prevents
vast complications.
There Is Yankee skipper from Maine.
well known as coal trader, Captain
Pitcher. He is like most Maine men,
largely proportioned and powerful
Some years ago he ran the Krantz from
Washington TO Boston, but has been
abroad since, trading between this conti-
ment. AS the story goes, British
troop ship, commanded by an irritable,
impetuous old duffer of the Queens
"navee," was at anchor In foreign
port.
Captain Pitchers bark was being
piloted in, and through some misman-
agement fouled the jlb-boon of the
troop-ship, doing, however, little or no
damage. The old officer, in fury of
rage. howled:
"Come on board, sir"
The Yankee skipper, not exactly
knowing what to do under the circum-
stances, pulled his gig to the ladder of
the troop.ship and mounted to the deck.
He was somewhat startled, when, as he
stood upon it, the old officer called
"Sentry, arrest the man,
The skipper was astounded, but quick
ly answered:
"I am an American citizen. | am un-
armed, but no man shall arrest me.'
ARREST him, sentry. Don't you hear
me 2" roared the Englishman.
The sentry advanced to seize the skip
per, but was met with left-hander that
would discount pile. driver. Quickly
the Yankee made for the gangway,
striking down every man who inter-
fered, and leaped into his gig and pulled
off to his bark.
Straight to the American Consul he
proceeded, and put the case before him.
The latter told him he would attend to
the matter, and the next day the skip
per called. The consul sat at the centre of
the table to his right was the English
officer, no other than Vice Admiral Sir
James Hope, *. q. B., in all the splen-
dor of full uniform.
"Captain, L am delighted to meet
you," responded the admiral. And
now let the war so on"
He spoke in the suavest manner and
with the sweetest of smiles. The skip
per bluntly said that he thought the
English officer should apologize.
mot at all, not at all, my dear friend.
You came on board of my ship, whip
ped the entire Queens navy, and escap-
ed without scratch. Is not that suffi-
cient satisfaction ? Don't let us have a
Alabama claim business, please don't
ask ask an apology. You are too good
q fellow, know, to force it,"
"Well, Admiral, " begun the captain,
greatly Modified, swell, Admiral, / sor-
ter guess it's all right"
"Of course it is. We are diplomats,
you know, and / have some splendid
brandy in my cabin. These are excel
lent cigars. We will adjourn to our
brandy and cigars and our two nations
will postpone war. If all your sailors
are like you should prefer that the war
be indefinitely postponed"
The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1879-12-16

gY- The faults, the sins, the imperfec-
tions that men see in us, or we feel in
ourselves, are indeed our burdens which
we must bear for ourselves, and should
bear for each other, humbly, but with
out Encouragement; waiting till the
new man be grown up to the fullness
of the measure of the stature of Jesus
Christ
The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1879-12-16

O. A stout backbone is as essential to
physical health as to political consisten-
cy. For weakness of the hack and
disorders of the liver and kidneys, the
tonic and moderate dietetic action of the
Bitters is the one thing needful. Re
member that the stomach is the main
stay of every other organ, and that by
invigorating the digestion by this prep
aration, the spinal column and all its
dependencies are strengthed.
For Hostetter's Almanac for 1880 APP
ply to Druggists and Dealers generally.
40 At.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
he HAD THE BOSS STOVE.

Coming down on the street car the other
morning they got to talking about their
ocsl stoves, and one man said
We'll, don't want to brag, but think
I've got the boss stove. So far this winter
| havnt burned but three tons of coal, and
the stove has kept three rooms warm
You must have poor stove remarked
the second. havn't burned bat two tons
of coal yet, and my stove heats parlor, dii-
ing room, two bedrooms and hall
We'll when you come to stoves, quietly
remarked the third, Il claim to have the
best coal stove in Detroit. have burned
but ton and a half of coal so far, and we
have to keep all the dampers shut, and
back door open all the time
Some men looked out of the window and
some down at the straw, and no one seemed
to doubt any of the assertions. At length
heavy sigh was heard frt m the rear end of
| the car, and a clerical looking man arose
and said
Gentlemen, there goes a fire-alarm. 1t
| strikes the box in front of my house. / have
no doubt that my residence is at this hour
in flames and the lives of my family are in
peril. 1t is all owing to my coal stove. 1
set up the stove last November and put on
one peck of coal. Every room has been 20
| hot ever since that the base-boards have
warped off, and We finally had to move
down into the basement. This morning the
water in all the pipes in the house was boil.
ing, the shingles on the roof red hot, and 1
have just hired four men to form snow
| bank around the stove. Too late-alas
too late ! That stove has accOmplishe its
fiendish purpose and no longer have
home. 1t may not, however, be too late to
save the baby. Good-by, gentlemen p
He opened the door and got off the car,
and not passenger spoke again for four
blocks.-DetroH Free Press.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
"CASABIANCA' IN PROSE.

lad named Casabianca stood on tn,
burning deck Of the Orient after everybody
had played the great act and deserted her
while the flames that lit the battles wreck
shone round him o. er the dead 1t was an
uncomfortable position for the young fellow
to be placed in, yet beautiful and bright he
stood, as born to rule the storm or burst a
Hue. You will doubtless be surprised to
hear it, but the flames rolled on, some of
them scooting up the mainmast as a repair
er would scoot up telegraph pole, some
performing monkeyshines on the yardsarm,
Others licking the name off the sides of the
vessel, etc. Notwithstanding all this busi-
ness, the boy would not go without his fa-
theirs word, for the very good reason that
his back was still ringed, streaked from the
last ambasting he received for disobeying
the old man.
He called aloud Say, father, say If yet
my task is done, for if l don't get out of
this pretty quick I'll be done myself, and
done brown, too ; and don't you forget it,
You see he was ignorant of the fact that
the chieftain lay unconscious of his son.
Speak, father J once again he yelled if
| may yet be gone p and just then the enc
my's vessel sent broadside into the burn
ing wreck, AMI fast the flames rolled on. He
felt their breath on his brow and he thought
to hr-self that it was getting almost as hot
as ward caucus. The boy continued to
look from that lone post of death, while he
ratified the marbles, spools, tops, brass but
tons, dog knives and few other things III
his pocket, with more or less despair depict.
ed on his countenance.
He shouted but once more aloud 'Fa.
ther, what's the use of me standn' here p
While DER him fast, through sail and shroud,
the wreathing flames made way, with not
pump in working order, and nobody TO
work it. In order to make this thing very
graphic, it is necessary to state that the
fire'fiend wrapped the ship in splendor wild,
painting it in grander colors than the band
wagon of circus he also caught the flag
bons than street peddler. After this he
stood on top of the jackstag and made an iu-
cendiary Fourth-of-July speech to the sea-
gull. But in the midst of life we are in
death. There came burst of thunder sound;
the boy, oh where
To tell the great American truth, there was
no boy in the case. Captain Casabianca
had no son, and, even if he had, it is not
likely he would have taken him along when
he was expecting this battle on the Nile, to
say nothing of the absurdity of supposing
father would expose his little son on the
deck of vessel during an engagement
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
PUNISHlNG AN ELEPHANT.

Emperor Is the most vicious, as be is the
finest animal in the country. During the
winter months he and his six companions
are chained by their hind legs in an out
building in Central Park N. Y. Boat
swain, until the arrival Of Emperor, was the
pride of all female elephants, and Gypsy es-
pecially loved to caresa him with her ggentle
| trunk. But Boatswain once cried out under
punishment and from that hour he lost his
place in the respect of his associates and
Gypsy transferred her Establishments to the
last conner.
The device of circus men for Furnishing
an elephant is cruel. To legs of the animal
are fastened strong puleys, which are at
tached to levers. Alta sgnal the legs are
drawn asunder, and the animal sinks down
mass of helpless, tortured flesh. Then
the keepers, armed with long clubs, ap.
proach and beat him on the legs and bot
toms of the feet. The elephant during pun
ishment curls his trunk beneath him, and
closes his eyes. Hour after hour goes by
sometimes, but the keepers only relax when
the elephant either becomes insensible 'or
cries out which latter is token of submis-
sion and conquered spirit. Boatswain
cried out, and was never again guilty of Of
tense. Emperor, how ever, has stood this
terrible punishment several times and with
such extraordinary nerve that his kee ers
are afraid OF him. He is vicious, and wnen-
ever missile comes within his reach hessdis-
charges it at the nearest keeper straightway.
On Monday night Emperor watched one
of the attendants whom he particularly dis
likes. 1t was bedtime, and the man was
making everything snug when Emperor
turned upon him and knocked him down.
The keeper screamed, as Emperor, with
shrll cry of rage, WAS on the point of drag
ging him beneath his feet and stamping him
to death. Help came, and the keeper was
saved, and then it was determined that EN-
peror should suffer for what he had done.
The attendants took the long iron poker
with which the fires are stirred, and this
they heated red hot. Emperor was bound
in the fashion that has been described, and
while one of the keepers held his trunk, the
other ran the red hot poker up into it. The
savage punishment nearly blinded Emperor,
but he did not squeal. He looked sullenly
all the time at his keepers. Since then the
elephant has been unable to eat and stands
alone and sullen, slapping his horribly mu-
tilated trunk wherever there is cool spot
in the shed. The men call this extreme
punishment, and said that it has never been
applied before in this country. 1t was not
strong enough tu subdue Emperor. Sun.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
POetical.
A LEGEND FROM THE TAIL
MUD.
ny CHARLOTTE NJ. PACKARD,

The patriarch Abram sat in his tent door
Waiting the guest whom God perchance
would send
To ask an aims from his abundant store,
Or timely shelter, given as to a friend.
The cool wind lifting carclessly his hair,
Stirred to new thankfulness his soul serene,
When looking up, one waiting halted there.
Whose shadow trembled on the earth I
ween
An old, old pilgrim, leaning on his staff,
With vision dim returned his asking gaze,
His story in his aspect written half.
And half rehearsed in slow. uncertain phrase
The Father of the Faithful welcomed him.
Bathed the tired feet and profered wine and
bread,
Looking to trace, cen in that visage grim,
a grateful soul bent to the Hand that fed.
Yet blessing none escaped the famished lips;
This heather beggar knew no God but
Fire;
So Charity was lost in swift eclipse,
And Abram cried in his exceeding ire
VI cast thee out, ungrateful, to partako
OF the great deserts shelter, that the night
Darkening around, thy graceless soul may
shake;
Since He is in the dusk as in the light ~
But the Lord called to Abram in his sleep;
"How petty thy inpatient soul appears,
Unwilling for single night to keep
Whom God hath suffered, 10 these hundred
years y
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
BEET SUGAR IN MAINE.

The Maine Beet Sugar Co., located in
Portland, has proved a grand success. The
Company are highly grati6ed with the re-
suits of last year. 1t being their first year,
they paid but "a per ton for beets. This
year they advertise to pay the farmers IS
per ton for beets landed at depot on the
line of any railroad leading into Portland.
Last year our farmers raised from Is to
AZ tons per acre. The amount raised de-
pended almost entirely on the richness of
the soil.
Where the crop is 20 tons, the farmer re-
ceives 500 for every acre of beets raised.
One ton of beets will produce 400 pounds
of pressed pulp, which is sold to the farm.
ers for 81 per ton and every 800 pounds of
pressed pulp is worth 400 of hay for stock.
This year the Beet Sugar Co., have ad-
ded 900 to their capital stock, and have
asked the farmers TO cultivate 1900 acres of
baets, as it will require 10000 tons OF beets
to supply their demands the present year
Many of our farmers will make the beet
raising speciality, for the very reason that
it will pay.
1t has been proved by actual experiment
that the farmers in Maine can raise as many
tons of bests per acre as are being raised in
France OF Germany, where the sugar beet is
cultivated upon large scale.
One acre of beets will produce about 2SOO
pounds of sugar.
The sugar made in Portland last year was
| of superior quality Journal.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
THE NEW FASHIONS IN CARDS.

Some days ago the adjournment of Con
gress, as the story goes, good-natured and
ponderous Senator McCreery, of Kentucky
was waddling down Pennsylvania avenue,
when dapper young gentleman, one of that
class which delights Society girls by ex-
claiming at intervals during fashionable
reception Have you been very gay this
season P approached him with the ques.
tion: 'Ah, Senator, how de do? I called
on you this morning. Did you get my
card p
Yes, said the Senator dry,y, 4 got the
card but what did you mean by writing
'E, P, in the corner of it p
'Oh that said the young gentleman evi.
IDENTIFY delighted at being able to give infor-
nation, that means zen personne' in other
words left in person..
Yes, yes, said the Senator meditatively,
Il see
The next day Mr.. McCreery again met
the young man, and this time going up to
him, said, 'Ah, by the way, called on you
this morning did you get my card?'
Yes sir; yes was the reply,I got it; but,
say, Senator, what did you mean by writ
ing $, b. y NJ in the corner of it?'
What cried the old gentleman laughing
all over his big face, didn'tyo understand
that? I'm surprised What should
mean but sent by niger ?'-N y. Times.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
BLOOMSBURY, Pa. FRIDAY APRIL II, 1879

sadly, "You are gone. You were the only
one that loved ME, and killed you" Then
sobs and groans would interrupt her words.
She did not see Horlense till suddenly
she looked up.
"Oh, do not send me away ~ she said
wildly. "I did not mean to kill her How
could want to kill the only one that loved
meY Let me stay Do let me stay l' and
she clung to Hortense's dress conyulsiye.
ly.
Lulu Allen, how came you here ?" was
all that Hortense could reply.
u could not rest, / could not sleep, till
had asked Maud to forgive me for poison.
ing her, so | came here, and by and by I
shall rest with her down in the ground.n
and she buried her face in the grass, as if
she would seek shelter with her friend from
the harsh world.
Hortense knew that she was wild and de-
lirious and her heart smote her for the wrong
she had done her, There by her sisters
grave she could not retain her old animositv
Her own tears flowed faster than Lulus had
done.
God forgive p cried she, falling on her
knees by the side of the grave. "God for.
give me my sin toward you. Lulu Allen
Come, Lulu dear Lulu Maud's Lulu y,
she said, "a Lulu neither stirred nor moved.
but lay PROSTATE by the grave. Lulu heard
her not-she was with Maud in brighter
world.
The rest of the events ofthat fearful night
Hortense could never remember clearly.
How she made known where the dead Lulu
lay, or how she reached home herself but
from that night Hortense was unlike her
former self. 1t was bitter lesson, but one
that she never forgot and as the plow.s share
of afiliction rooted up the strong weeds of
pride and hatred from her heart, so in their
stead was planted good seed that sprang up,
making her life beautiful.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11

OFF HIS MIND,-He might have been
drinking little just few drops of weak
lemonade or something of that kind-but
yet he looked like very respectable young
man as be leaned over the counter and in
quired for diary for 1879,
we have all styles aud prices replied
the dealer as he displayed the lot, and in a
short time sale was effected. The buyer
asked for pencil, aud standing at the coun-
ter he opened the diary and wrote
Jan. begin to save $40 week.
Jan. Love your enemies and be soft
with everybody.
Jan. 3.-Give literally to charity,
jan. PITY everybody's SORROWS,
Jan, 5.-Set everyone good example.
Jan. 6,-Don't smoke, chew, drink, play
cards, swear, stay out, lie, steal, borrow
m,ney, speak cross words, get in anyone's
way or talk politics.
Jlu, buy pair of wings and fly to a
better land.
Thanks for the pencil, he said as he fold
ed the book. Now that the affair is off nv
mind for year to come feel thirsty, Won't
you go and take somethingp
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
Select Story.
LULU.
BY G.. L.

Il hate her! The tattling little upstart,
the beggar's brat !, exclaimed llortense Lee,
as she stood in the midst of her schoomates.
1T is bad enough to have washerwoman' 8
daughter who has to do chores for her tu.
ition, in school, at any rate, but when she
begins to tatte about us, it is time to teach
her lesson Miss Gorden has made too
much Of her. She forgets hersefand is really
beginning to feel on an equality with Us. !,
for one, will show Miss Rag Bag her place. ,
Just then the door opened and fragile,
delicate girl of some II summers stepped
in.
Good-morniug, said she, pleasantly, to
the group of girls.
There was no reply. All looked timidy
at Hortense, for she was all powerful there,
and her flashing eye deferred any of the
more venturesome who would have addressed
Lulu Allen.
GOOD morning, girls, repeated Lulu.
Hortense drew herself up haughtily. AT
tend to your dusting,' said she. You do
not pay your tuition by entertaining US, and
we do not care to hear any of your hypoeri.
ticai remarks. The society of a tattler is
anything but agreeoble'
oh Hortense, did not tattle,' exclaim-
ed poor Lulu, while tears rushed to her
eyes
Tattlers are always liars, scornlully re-
piled Hortense, as she turned away, while
Lulu sank sobbing into her seat A few of
the girls looked pityingly upon her, but no
one ventured to approach her.
4 don't believe she did tell, Tensia,
whispered Martha Mayer.
You are at perfect liberty to think what
you please replied Hortense. GO if you
choose, take the the part of a mean inlor-
mer aud spy, But | thought you had more
spirit than to be turned round by few
crocodile tears
Martha shrank back abashed, and the rest
of the girls were easily persuaded that
Hortense was right. The bell soon rang,
and all entered upon their school duties,
Hortense Lee was at this time about Is
years of age, and certainly very handsome
She was at once the idol and terror of the
whole school, No one could be more agree
able than she when her will was obeyed /;
no one understood better than she how to
visit any opposition to it on the heads of the
offenders. She was fle scholar and had
always been treated by her teachers with
marked distinction. Her father was wealthy
and delighted to deck in rich attire his child
the pride of his heart He either did not
see Ter aristocratic and naughty notions or
found an echo to them in his heart-for his
child resembled him much in character ;
at any rate he never checked them. Her
mother, one of the most gentle and humble
of women, indeed often reasoned with her
on the folly and wickedness of her pride,
aud imagined that the respectful attentions
which her daughter paid her betokened a
disposition to correct her faults. Could she
have glanced into her chlld's mind, she
would have been astonshed to see what
thoughts were passing there. Hortense loved
her mother, but she was well aware that in
intellect she herself was far her superior
and it was with a kind of plying affection
that she listened to her parents admonitions
Her father she reverenced. She acknowl
| edged that he was her superior and his word
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
BABY HAS GONE TO SCHOOL.
The baby has gone to school ah me
What will the mother do,

The baby has gone to school ah me
What will the mother do,
With never call to button or pin.
Or tie little shoe ?
How can she keep herself busy Ill dav.
With the little "hindering thing away?
Another basket to ill with lunch,
Another ''good-by" to say,
And the mother stands at the door to see
Her baby march away
And turns with sigh that is half relief,
And half a something akin to grief.
She thinks of a possible future morn,
When the children, one by one,
Will go from their home out into the world
To battle with life alone,
And not even the baby be left to cheer
The desolate home of that future wear.
She picks up garments here and there,
Thrown down in careless haste,
And tries to think how it would seem
If nothing were displaced
If the house were always as still as this
How could she bear the loneliness d?
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1879-04-11
HER HISTORY,

The history of this woman is not only
sad, but 1t "lso has romantic aspect. In
1903 jerome Bonsparte who was nineteen,
visited Baltimore. He was the youngest
child in the family, being the junior of Ma
poleon by fifteen years, He had some ex-
perience in naval matters, and had reached
the rank of lieutenant In Baltimore he
became attached to Miss Patterson. a Young
lady of wealth and beauty, whom he married
Notwithstanding the protests of the French
consul. The bride was year younger THAI
her husband, whom she accompanied to Eu.
rope, but the imprudent couple found to
their surprise that they were not allowed to
enter France. Jerome left his wife at Lis.
bon in order to seek an interview with his
brother, the Emperor. The latter not only
refused to recognize the marriage, but worse
than this, he persuaded Jerome to abandon
his wife, and the young couple, thus sudden
ly separated never met again. The neglected
wife was early called to suffer great agony.
Having no hope of her husbands return,
she took passage to England where she be-
came the mother of son, with whom she
sailed for Baltimore, Since then she has
passed her life in that city, with the excep.
ton of trip to Europe many years ago.
How strange to recall the fact that this wo-
man, though thus shamefully deserted, has
always cherished an affection for her hus.
band She refused any second alliance. and
hence remained Madame Bonaparte. Chief
among the sorrows of her latter days was
the death of her only son, which occurred
in Baltimore in 1870. He bore his fathers
name and was bred a lawyer, but never
practiced, for having married woman of
wealth, he was enabled to live in handsome
style until removed by death at the age
of 66l.