Stevens County tribune. (Morris, Minn.) 1877-1880, 1879-05-01
NEWS PARAGRAPHS.

+ Dennis Kearney shaves with pair of scis- |
Clara LOnise Kellogg has had i've colds this
winter.
The foliage has about got through its leave OF
absence.
Are shopping ladies liable to be called price
6ghtersa
Prince Napoleon's war cry-'' Up guards, and
run for yonr hVes."a a&.-sA a-&sA
What is the GEAR making all this fuss about3
Nihilism is nothing.
Spring, bright, beautiful balmy spr-but
it may snow tomorrow.
The French soldier is to have gray trowsers
instead of red, hereafter. .S
There's kind of muslin called Jamdari. 1t
makes Jamdari costume.
Since the first day of March Chicago packers
have handled 2s7 900 hogs. gTTT1 gF
Hanging of late doesn't result in necks-taut-
ing confessions from criminals.
st. Louis man ran six blocks after his nose
7 thinking he was going to fire.
The king of Burmah is as independent as
swine upon CONCEALED aqueous fluid.
A Cortland, n. Y, man, who ate 175 CLAIMS
is called "a living instance of gulosity."
We can prove that the wind is non-prOgres
siye. Isn't it precautionary in its tendencies?
new reading for an old proverb: "A Miss
good for 5000 quarter miles. boston
Times.
Ohio must look to her laurels. 1t was an In
diana man ate two dozen boiled goose eggs in
thirty minutes. 90
When young sexton with q sweetheart
heard any gossip, he always went straightway
and told his belle.
The car must follow the example of Eng
land and order lot of American mules to kick
the Nihilists to death.
It is to be regretted that the widow didn't
win her case. If Simon had married her she
wouldn't have lectured.
Bismarck leaves the national chamber when
those members whom he specially dislikes get
up to make an address.
Only wait till Cetywoyo meets Kickawsyo
the chief of the American mules. Then you
will see fight as is fight.
[ Single weddings are becoming fashionable.
They occur when the first chlld is old enough
to spank.-Meriden Recorder.
calcium light, turned on from the upper
circle of theater, always strikes the bald head
Of the big fiddler most forcibly.
Miss Mary Townsend, of New York, is the
last beautiful and accomplished young LADY,
who has wed her fathers coachman.
The Chinese are beginning to make use of
milk in their country. Heretofore they have
, avoided it entirely, also cheese and butter.
, Boyton, after finishing his trip down the
Mississippi river, will make a voyage down the
3 st. Lawrence and will try to shoot its rapids.
: Will the people who are talking about
: Europe's king-killers please tell us who they
are? We haven't heard of any soyereign's death
by violence.
England has sent to America for military
, talent to prosecute the South African war. We
have just shipped her 500 of our most intel
8 lectual mules. s-A ~t#~$ -
t Wagner, the composer, has become hopelesslJ
insane. He was always considered an eccentric
individual but probably it was incipient mad
5 ness all the time.
This proverb ia floating about the country
, ''One talent well cultivated is worth a hundred
!, faculties" We refer it to the head men of the
different colleges.
n The Trocadero Palace is as much of white
: elephant as the buildings at Philadelphia. The
city of Paris refuses to give the 5000, 0O0f the
o State asks for the building.
q ,Theth New York printers who drew $5, 0O(
q apiece in lottery will do better still by moi
leaving off type setting. Let them give othel
i folks q chance to be fooled.
Opium smoking finds little federation in ia
pan. man was recently sentenced to ter
years hard labor in Yokohama for violation Of
y the law against the practice.
q A splendid national theater, to be erected re
q gardless of expense, is projected in London
n after the idea of the Grand Opera House il
l. Paris, which cost about $15, 100000.
,, The publisher of the Revolution Francois
has been Sentenced to pay fine of 5000 franc
. and to eight months imprisonment for
- scurrillious article against Catholicity.
e Cyrus Field proposes erecting monumen
/ to the English spy, Major Andre, and now it i
b proposed thot one be erected to Nathan Hale
II the first of American martyrs to liberty.
= Detroit is going to have a bridge across tn
Il Detroit river. The reason is good one. Sh
q must have it, and she isn't going to have an,
d Brooklyn nonsense about it's construction
% either.
d Twelve paper making establishments il
a England have become bankrupt since last De
Is cember. Scarcely any American paper fac
l. tories have been reported insolvent within tina
u period.
n Watertown, N. Y, has definitely settled tn
= tramp question by locking mp the almshous
!. and issuing mandate to arrest every membe
= = of the travelling pests that frequents tn
!. village.
% 1t is said that Sothern will be accompanie,
# this country next month by the Duke of Beau
p fort. Has Sothern sunk so low "a to q
a. traipsing around the country in company wit
{, duke?
% Brown wrote to his father in the countr
"a that no one could live decently in Boston TO
. less than % o day. The old man replied tina
=. if decency was selling SO dear, he'd bette
: come home 1855 A.Sst
~ A paragraph to the effect that q man nea
70 Frankfort, KY, was killed by falling into:
well, the other day, is extremely astonishing
Who ever heard of q Kentucky man being with
in mile of we'll?
a "We are going oat with the tied, saida
Ioll young man to q friend, as he filed down th
IN aisle after wedding. "In that case, said
ri lady in front, ''you can afford to get off m
.. train" And he did. gIg
j. Celebrated as is England for its high farI
a. ing there are yet 10000, 900 acres of waste {
" uncultivated land in that country-a possibl
IS means of home food production to that islam
ut is certainly very promising. ar
"a