The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1879-09-24
Good Takers.

rDr. Holland in Scrlbner for October]
The first requisite Of a good ta!ker is
genuine social sympathy. A man may not
say. ont Of some selfish motive, or some
motive OF personal policy, $50 to | will
become q good taIker." He must enjoy
society, and have genuine desire to serve
and please. We have all seen the talker
who talks for bis own purposes, or talks to
please himself. He is the well-known char
ac1er-thc taking bore. The talker who
g,ts himself up for show, who plans his con-
ycisation> for an evening, and Grams Tor
them, becomes intolerable. He lectures ::
he does not converse; for there is no power
a talker 50 delightful as that Of exciting
others 10 talk. and listening to what his
own inspiring and suggestive utterances
have called forth. Genuine social sympathy
and hearty desire to please others are ne
cc>sarr 10 produce such talker as this,
ani no other is ,oerahle. Social sympathy
j a natural gift. and there is q combination
q other gifts which constitute what mag be
called esprit that are very essential to a
good takrr. This combination includes
Individuality. tact. and wit-the talents,
apliludcS and peculiar characteristic charm
which enable man 10 use the materials OF
conversation in an engaging way, entirely
way OF Sayin" good things, as well as OF
managing conversation based on his esprit.
Yet 1t is true that there are no good
takers who depend upon their natural gifts
and such material IS they get in the usual
intcrchanges OF society. For the materials
OF conversation we must draw upon know
ledge. No man can be 4 thoroughly good
tsker who Goes not know great deal.
Social sympathy and "thc gift OF CAB" 60
but 4 short way toward producing good
conversation, though we hear q great deal
q this kind OF talk among the young.
Sound aud exact knowledge IS the very
basis Of good conversation. TO know q
great MANY things well is 10 have in hand
the best and most reliable materials OF good
conversation. There is nothing like aDun-
dance and cXactness Of knowledge with
which to furnish a talker. Next to this,
perhaps, is familiarity with polite literature.
The faculty OF quoting from the best
authors is a very desirable one. Facts are
valuable, and thoughts perhaps are quite as
valuable, especially as they are more Stlmu-
!ating 10 the conversation Of a group. The
talkCr who deals alone in facts is quite
likely to have the talk ali to himself, while
The man who is familiar with thoughts and
IDEAS as he has found them embodied in
literature, becomes 4 stimulator of thought
and conversation in those around him.
Familiarity with knowledge and with the
products OF literary art cannot be TOO much
Insisted on as the furniture OF good con-
TerSatiOn.
Beyond this, the good talker must be
familiar with the current thought and
events OF his time. There should be no
movement in politics, religion, and society
that the good talkcr is not familiar with.
indeed, the man who undertakes to talk at
Az must know what is uppermost In mems
MINDS, and be able to add to the general
!ahu Of thought and knowledge, and re-
'Hond 10 the popular inquiry and the po-
iniar disposition for discussion. The man
VINO undertakes to be Il good talker should
never De caught mapping concerning any
current topic Of Immediate public interest.
now TO carry and convey superiority OF
knowledge and culture without appearing
10 0e pedantic, how to talk out OF abundant
sores Of information and familiarity with
T T without seeming TO preach, as
|1lefidge was accused OF doing, belongs,
Vim the ability TO talk well, to "the art OF
r.a'efsatlon." 1t has seemed to us that il
: ,vS beop'e could only see how shallow
~S., slily very much OF their talk is, and
ns s necessarily be, so long as they lack the
,ac nor OF conversation, they would take
then!I,sslns with their study, would devote
at Ie,,' more TO the best books, and that,
more thaey would acquire and maintain
eyeDh nMyisrity with important current
cure r., 10 know something is the best
about dra.aa elghborhood gossip, for talk
and sifinSs' and for ten thousand friyolities
taIker na"Ses Of society. Besides, good
respn,S IV ca, aa audience to understand and
II tier - ), nm, and where is he to find Que
him; y not abundant culture around