The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1877-1885, 1879-01-16
Waiting for a Woman ID Get
Ready.

Are You a uldu Il - eoU
probably had the pleasure OF waiting
for a woman to get ready 10 go
somewhere. Getting ready Is a mighty
operation Tor a womsn TO perform: IL
has always been so bu5 i'll these day s
of complicated costumes, and lnume-
rable appendages of the toilet, 1t Is a
stupendous undertaking. You are IN
fatuated with Miss b. You invite her
to ride behind your span of grays.
You are wise enIugh to know that all
women, or most OF them. like a hne
turn out, and would much sooner be
made owe to by a man who owns a
nice team than by one who takes his
airings in horse cars or omnlouses.
You set the time at $3.50 p. m. She
asks sweetly if you could not just as
we'll come at 4. Of course she would
like TO go earlier, but she doubts II she
can get read,. and. of course, as you
are not married TO h r, you are only
too happy to do just as she wants you
to. After marriage as the French say,
1--WE change all that and when
moIsieur bids her, madame must be
ready or left behind.
At precisely 4 the next day you
drive TO Miss BIS gate with a grand
" lSI l 1Ooho ~ S
walking with your horses up to a
hiJchlng post. and you AVE been
showing your animals the whip a few
blocks away. They are stirred up by
it and toss their heads and purr up
papa BIS concrete, and snap at the
~shrubbery in a Vicious way, and assure
you eqinely that they had just as soon
not wait for a woman to get ready.
No1, Thin L or Fl ret Won won't hi Gu
them, for surely she is r ady, but re-
Numbering former experiences with
those of her sex, you change your
mind and give a small boy ten cents
TO have an eve on them. You ring
the bell and are admitted, and the
small boy engages in marble playing
with another small boy and entrust the
horses 10 Providence.
is Miss B ready" you blandly ask
the maid servant.
She doesn't know she will enquire.
You stand first on one foot and then
on the other. and stare at the ha'-tree
and pull your new style collar, which
ou-ht to stand up, but which has de-
velOped an obstinate tend ncy to lOp
down, and you wonder where on earth
that servant has gone to inquire, and
you run out to see your horses, n
administer some sharp words to your
small Delinquent groom. and he
thumbs his nose at you the minut
your back is turned.
By the time you get into the house
again Mrs. b. is coming down the
stairs in a toilet made in evident haste.
She is cordial and invites you into the
parlor, and says Marie will BE- down in
a moment, and she is SO sorry to have
kept you waiting.
From above stairs you can hear the
sound of the notes of preparation.
Much tr aiding back and forth, opening
of closet doors, shut ing Of drawers.
scolding Of the maid in suppress
tones, and liveliness generally.
If you could look into Marie's cham
Der you would be in despair. Her
''crimps" are not taken down, her
boots unbuttoned, her pullback's elias
tic cords are out of gear, and the maid
is fixing them she can't find her
bracelets one cuff pin is missing she
has put arnica on her handkerchief by
mistake, thinking it Jockey Club !;
there is a button off her basque from
hurried buttoning, and oh, dear /! dear!
where are her lemon kids, and her
parasol, aud her lace scarf, and that
coral neck chain, and a shawl, and 4
white lace veil, and a DOZEN other ne
ceSsary articles!
She has hurried SO that her face is
all ablaze, and she is sure she looks
like a washer-wOman, and she seizes
her powder-puff, dabs a little chalk on
her forehead, and hopes it won't be
seen, as she is going out to ride with a
gentleman and not with a IN
All unconscious of the tria's which
beset your charming Marie, you are
striving to do the agreeable to Mrs b,
with the sound Of your horses paving
up that sidewalk in your ears, and you
know the old man is particular about
his grounds and directly you hear
SOMETHING snap and rush out to find
hat one of your spirited nags has bit
ten Oft a fence picket and is trying his
best on another by way of dessert.
Viii she ever get ready?
You go back to tell Mrs b. that
your horses are SO FESTIVE that you
must stand by them, and you retire to
the sidewalk, painfully conscious that
across the street, in that big tenement
house half a dozen children and young
people, and as many more idle loafers,
are watching you and laughing at your
iuSulIdl1lCIlC, u t-lltHS odCu QUIET
hat that is the chap that is trying to
court Marie b., and she's had nine
fellers already and every one of EN-
went back on her.
You consult your watch-5 o'clock +.
You feel inclined to swear a little, but
early piety forbids. and you try to pos
sess your soul in patience.
The door opens. She comes radiant
an6 SnilInO in tho lnro1ia,t -
costumes, pinned back SO tight that
she creeps towards you like a snail,
and you mentally wonder how she is
ever going to strp high enough to get
into the carriage and her hat is so