The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1879-03-20

SCRAPS.

A fare proposition-"Ti please. y
Bred on the waters-The ancient mar.
iner
The small boy is never proud of his
torn clothes.
Just snow enough to round out the
cat -tracks BEAUTIFULLY.
Cincinnati is not the Paris of America.
1t is the Hamburg.
When humorist dies, his sorrowing
family are at their wits end.
When your wife falls asleep by the
fire take the tongs and poker.
Take good care of your minutes; ours
will take care of themselves.
Seed anything of the chap who prof.
sled ed OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
When I roll my snow ball in the snow
what is added is snow after it is added.
When a man who cannot write is asked
to sign his name it generally makes him
If lady should knit a black scarf fol
her young man, wouldn't it be crow
shade?
If death loves a shining mark, why
isn't the mortality greater among boot
blacks?
Bar-room rows come about because q
man must fight when he Is i'll tight
place.
Some men who can walk match at
one time, can't walk n crack at other
times.
An Idaho town, having but one girl, is
called Onegirlia. How far is this from
Boise City?
A classical man in Venice Illinois, has
christeneG his cats ''Othello, the NEVER
of Venice"
An exchange asks: "What is nicer to
hold than pretty woman's hand 2" -Four
aces, OF course.
The man who is waiting for something
to turn up generally finds it when he
steps on q barrel hoop.
On leaving room make your best
salaam to persons present, and retire
without salaaming the door.
'Too much shirt collar and too little
young man, is the girls verdict on the
average beau of the period.
Talking of abrogating the fishery
treaty suggests to us whether or not the
lobster claws might not be cut out.
A new kind of ulster has Just beenIn
vented with snow sheds all around the
collar and box tunnel down the back.
1t is very vulgar to ask man to step
out and take something. The cultured
way to do it is to say, Tets symposiate. "
Sharp old lady: Eyes, miss, very
kind of your ma, but cookery book is
to cook.
Why is boat rowed by young wo-
man like candy scrape? Because it is
'lasses pull. This is inserted syrupti-
tiously.
An exchange has found ont when
Adam was married; of course it was on
his wedding Eve; most everybody knew
before.
A foreign journal says Poe's Raven
was borrowed from the Persian. If Poe
wa alive, he would doubtless deny the
fow as-Persian2
The man who wrote that nothing was
impo ssible never tried to find the pocket
in bis wife's dress when it was hanging
up in q ciothes-pre
Thompson says you may talk of your
water cures, your movement cures and
your blue glass cures, but there is moth
ing like the sinecure, after all.
A man never realizes the beauties of
this world till he drops two square inches
of thoroughly buttered toast on the pol
ished side of newly laundried shirt
bosom.
Now that bill restricting the immi-
grafton of the Chinese has passed the
house. the woman who supports her
husband by taking IN washing can afford
to have twins occasionally.
A bashful young man could defer the
momentous question no longer, so he
stammered: martha, lido you-you
must haye-are you aware that the good
book says-er, says that it is notg good
that m man should be alone?" "Then
hadn't you better run home to your
motherl" Martha coollv suggested.