National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1879-03-15
a Sibblc-Trceting of rond,es.

wise in his generation. The people in general
of that primitive age were entirely in the dark
as TO the delicious flavor Of frog ham, and they
also thought that wholesome dish to be N dish
of death to the eater The mountebank had
by some means learned better, which knowl.
edge he with his usual prudence in such mat
ters, kept wisely to himself. Then when
crowd collected around him for the express
purpose of being fooled, as crowds are exceed
ingy fond of doing even unto this day, he
caused the boy who helped in his tricks TO dine
on toads, after which the master pretended to
perform n most wonderful cure. where single
touch of his hand was powerful antidOtc, de-
stroying all the i'll effects of the terrible toad
poison.
From this sycophantic puppct in the hands
of humbugging mountebanll is derived the
name toady, otherwise toad-eater. Readers,
how many of you have n toady among your
acquaintances? Or, rather how few of you
have not? We all know him; we meet him
on the street every day, Mt the doors of all the
Departments, and especially IN the Capitol.
He thrusts himself uninvitcd into places Of
honor. which hG in no wise ad0rns. lie button
holes unwilling Senators till they shake him
off, nnd afterward tells in an oll-hand style of
tho long aud confidential talk ho had with
Mr.. Chandler, for instanCe), in which he repre-
Zach, that last speech of yours beat the bugs
and fixes to u gnats heel the question of who
is to be our next President And the honora
bic gentleman slaps him ON the back ana says
"You bet, jim, that's just what's the matter"
He calls at the White House, where the
rights of an American citizen secure him neat
recognition of Just two seconds duration, and
the next day mentions quite casually "the de-
lightful evening lie spent in the blue parlor
with the President and Mrs. Hayes who urged
him to repeat the visit at his earliest opportu-
nifty, and if he was like great many others
he would do so but as to himself lie did not
care to go often at the risk of giving folks q
chance to say that he ran after those in author
| ity, and enyious folks will talk, YOU know"
| He insinuates himself into the editors sanctum
praising his paper up to the skies as a kind of
sop to Cerberus hoping that the knight of
| the quill will be kind enough to acknowledge
this tickling of this vanity by the courtesy of
a notice. o. the ecstacy lie feels Ifby means
of some editor, as great toad-eater as himself,
he gets his name into tho papers, he immed-
ately buy half dozen copies, at reduced rates,
and sends themI to his aunts, his uncles and
his mothor.in-law. You will hear the toady
| boast of the noted writer's of his acquaintance,
| too but if you run that rabbit to his burrow,
you will find he only knows Il scrbbler or two
whose articles are accepted by the editors to
| fill up during the adjournment of Con-
|
are only casual acquaintances ut that.
Sometimes the tOadyis found among writers
for the public press alas quito often, too, and
shameful as it is to tell it, his articles are gem
orally accepted and paid for at the highest
rates. 1t isl burning shame that while those
who write 10 do good without fear or favor,
can seldom turn an honest penny, such writers
can command a fabulous price. But whose
shame is il? | heard Washington publisher
say not long since: 81 do not approve of such
articles but my newspaper is an intellectual
hotel, and must furnish such meats rs the
guests demand" Still, Notwithstanding this,
the better class of those guests can but blush
with shame when such bill of fare is set be-
fore them rs this: Mrs. Speaker Randall is
seen to the best advantage in the privacy of
home, where she devotes herself to her gifted
husband, who owes to her all that he is, y
especially when we reflect that this third-ratc
scribbler is scarcely like to get an opportunity
of observing Mrs Randall in private life. Such
hints as this, too: just as i was descending
Secretary Shermans steps, &C." If the writer
had said ascending from Mr. Sherman's base
ment II would probably have been more in keep.
ing with the facts. / cannot understand this
Ovcrwecning desire to seem great, when one u.s.
in fact, quite small, for the tOady is generally
despised by the very persons whom he
fatters, and who grant him lavors rs the only
means of getting rid of him. He has the sat
!
people by suiierance, because the truly great
are always polite and do not like to kick him
out. He gets on in the world, too, by it, fol
you will find the toady occupying some OF the
best places under tho Government. Members
of Congress are not invulnerablc, and the heel
of Achilles sticks out In their vanity, and, alas
the shooting of that same is the toadys best
arrow; and, besides, the moro blood you give
leech the sooner 1t will drop Off
No, thank you ! do not wish TO meet people
that way. l would like to know all the grand
men and lovely women who occupy the hgl
places in our capital because they are intelli
gent and refined but | would rather remnL
sein-the.cOrner to the end Of the chapter
from my sheltered nook viewing the worlt
that so accommodatingly resolves itself into {
panorama for my especial benefit than to cowe
at the feet of the giant whose mercy alone re
strains him from crushing me under foot fO
my temerity. l have perfect right to sit in
the galleries and hear the deathless words ou
giants utter Chat is, when the young fops witt
crowd ladies out of their own position can fine
no silly Miss to chatter with, and the only
thing really covet with great and might,
longing is good seat there at times of unusua
interest, which is the very time l am alway
crowded out by n chatterlng thrOng, who max,
. good an old cOuplet, slightly changed:
Fools names and silly faces
Are always seen in public places.
MOUSE-IN.THE CORNER.
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A.