Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1879-06-13
VARIETY AND HUMOR.
"A marble haul-stealing tomb
stone.

"A marble haul-Stesling . tomb
stone.
The city which produces aIl the tel
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES.
Wedding rings : Matchmaking
mothers and fathers. Graphic.
-Greattalkers are very apt TO bemo-
nOlogists, and to ikepersons most who
interrupt them least.
Says Beaoonsfeld to the African re-
/ inforcements, I" Heads I win, tails Zu-
lus. - Boston Transcript.
The Chinese of California viii prob
ably give Member of Congress and an
Electoral vote to the State.
"A happy mother Of male twins enc
Enthusiastically refers to her treasures as
her "sweet boy and boy"
English physicians say that melan-
cholia is always active in the morning
and wears away toward night.
Two members Of the Liverpool
(Eng.) police force have been arrested
for completely in systematic robberies.
"A music-seller announces in his
window a sentimental song: "Thou
Hast Loved and Left Men for ten
cents.
The pavement found to answer
best in London is wood laid on asphalt,
which is allowed to harden before the
wood is laid on.
1t is a curious fact that on the track
of knsYery q misplaced switch will be
found somewhere, and it is sure to
wreck the train.
in the Old Bailey Court, London,
the atmosphere is so fuuof dirt that the
wigs of the lawyers become grimy, like
the wool of sheep.
His name was Wrath, and when he
asked his girl to marry him she gave
him q soft answer, and a soft answer
turned away Wrath.
I'VE old maids" remarked Miss
Stibbens, ''love cats because we have
no husbands, and cats are almost as
treaeherous as men,"
Electric lights are used on some Of
the Boston docks, saving time and ex-
pense, ships being loaded by night as
well as in the daytime.
1t is estimated that there are nearly
two millions of acres of land In ireland
which, if reclaimed, could be adapted
to the raising of grain.
An illiterate correspondent, who
is given to sporting, wants to know
when the "Anglo-Saxon race" so
much talked about, is to come Off
Turner'S Falls Reporter.
:" What is the right time to 90 to
bedPh is a question under discussion
by medical association in Vermont.
We have very little medical knoWl-
edge, but we should think when you
can't stand up any longer is about the
proper time. Burlington HGsoE-Eye.
Sir Rowland Hill is to receive the
freedom of the City of London'in the
traditional gold box in recognition Of
his services in connection with the es-
tablishment of penny postage. Why
the Common Council did not wait for
another century or so before conferring
this compliment is unknown.
Afghan fanatics who attempt to
assassinate English officers are, if /
caught, promptly shot and then
burned. This latter process, accord. |
ing to their belief; prevents them from
object in killing Englishmen. This
treatment viii, it is thought, moderate
the patriotic enthusiasm of the children
of the Ameer.
The President receives some GU
rious letters and kilograms. The fol-
lowing dispatch was received at the
White House on the 9th Of February:
g May the King of Kings incline the
President of the United States to do a
generous act, and to give the Postofice
10 --, a Christian gentleman. You .
will have Gods blessing, and that of a
thankful people. -
John Wardle, of Sale, near Man
chester, Eng, was a successful mimic
of farmyard noises, ETC., and was es-
peciallY proud of his ability to bark
like mad dog. A few nights ago he
resolved to terrify Edward Gresty, a
gardener, and did so very effectually,
for the latter, hearing a furious barking /
on his doorstep, cautiously opened q
window and shot the joker, killing him /
instantly.
"A correspondent of a New Hamp-
shire paper speaks of a little pool at /
which he often quenched his thirst in (
boyhood. It was, he says, in the (
eastern part Of the Town of AndoVer, /
and in summer the water trickled up [
from the earth, sparkling as crystal, /
and cold and refreshing, while in win /
ter, no matter TO what depths the mer-
curry might sink, the little stream bub- Il
bled musically out from the hillside, h
warm and insipid as fresh milk"
Glasses have been formed with the /
object of imparting to the London /
metropolitan body Of police knowledge /
of some of the elementary branches of (
surgery. In the course of their instruc-
ton they will be taught the various /
affections that may cause a man TO fall
down and lose consciousness, and their /
bandage fracture roughly; the proper
methods of adjusting the sufferers upon
the stretcher, and the best ways Of car
rying them when so adjusted.
. The hamster is a small rat-ike an
imal with a pouch on either side of its i
mouth, which it finds very convenient !
for secreting grain. It abounds in the |
sandy districts between Northern Ger
many and Siberia, and q single animal |
has been known to stow away 100 /
pounds of beans. At AschePsleben it |
became so serious a pest that early last
Septsmber the town offered reward
for these little animals, and over so, 900
were killed. The hamster is very
game, and savage fighter. Its fur,
which is variegated, is marketable.
.
An Absurd Law Of Russia.
A GREAT many persons have an idea
that it is unlawful to touch or attempt