The weekly democratic statesman. [volume] (Austin, Tex.) 1871-1883, 1879-08-21
How our Boarding Houses m $40
tells Deal with their Gueat..

Each guest, on his arrival, is sskId
how he likes the situation, and If he
says the hotel or boarding house ought
10 have been placed further from the
depot and nearer the business part of
town, the location will be immed ately
changed.
Corner front rooms, up only one
flight, fer each guest.
Bath, gas, water-closest, hCt and
cold water. laundry, telegraph, fire.
alarm, restaurant, bar-room. billiard
tables. daily papers, coupe, s. wirg-
machine, grand piano, a clergy IN ~,
and all other modern convenience IT.
every room.
Meals every minute il desire, and
consequently no second table.
English, French and German die
tionaries furnished every gursI, t,
make up such bill OF fare as he may
desire, without regard to bill Of iers
afterward at the ofiice.
Waters Of any nationality sud colCr.
Efery waiter furnished with nbretto,
button-hole bCguets, fuil-dress suits,
ball tsblets and the hair parted IN the
middle.
Every guest will have the best seat
il the dining hal aad the house.
Ang guest not getting his breakfast
--redhot, or experiencing a delay Of six
teen seconds after giving his order for
dinner will please mention the fsct at
the managers aud cooks and walters
will be blown from the mouth of the
cannon in front of the hotel at once.
Children will be welcomed with de-
light, rDd are requested 10 bring he op-
a,icks aud ha~ keyes 10 bang ,be
carved rosewood furniture especially
provided for that purpOsc, and peg
tops to spin on the velvet carpets.
They will be allowed to bang on the
piano at sill hours, fell down stairs,
carry away dessert enough for small
fsmiiy in their pockets az diuner, and
make themselves as disagreeab,e rs the
foDdest mother can desire.
Washing allowed In looms. Lghiss
giving an order to "put me on fat
iron" will be put on at any hour Of the
day or night.
A discreet waiter, who belon gs to
the Missions, Odd Fellows, Sons of
Malta, Knights of Pithias, X. o. Ms
and III. ID. RE-, and who wss never
known to tell the truth or the time of
day, has been employed to carry milk
punches and hot toddies 10 The ladies
rooms in The evening.
The Office clerk has been selected TO
please everybody, aud can lead IN
prayer, play draw poker, match worst
eds at the village store, shake for The
drinks at any hour Of the day or night,
-plsy billiards, o coed waiter, can daucc
the German, make fourth az euchre,
amuse the childreu, repeat the i secht I
trial from memory, is a good judge a
hoIsee, as a railroad or steamboat ref
erence IS far superior to Appleton's ~
anybody else's, will flirt with any young
lady and not mind being cut to death
when pa comes down"-don't mind
being damned any more than a Cor
nec,icut river; Gun room forty people
IN the best room in the house when the
housc is full, attend the annunciator
and answer questions IN Greek, He
brew, Irish, ChOck.aw or any other pc :
lite language, at the game m meLt,
without turning lair.
Dogs allowed in any room In the
house, including the w(b) re-room.
Gentlemen can drink, smoke, swear.
chew, gamble, tell shady stories, stare
at the new arrivals, or indulge in any
ether innocent amusement common to
watering places, in any part of the
hotel.
The landlord will always be hsppy
to hear that some othsr hotel is The
lest house IN the country.
Special attention given to parties
who can give information as to show
these things are done in Yewrur."