Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1879-11-06
NO. 46.

/
nett side, and Robert then
Senator of the United States-was for
DR.. Royston. The doctor proved the
number OF visits, and value according to
local custom, and his own authority to
do medical practice. Mr.. Stephens told
his client that the physician lad made
out his case, and as there was nothing
wherewith to rebut or offset the claim
the only thing lett to do was to pay it.
NO." said Peter, II hired you to
speak in my case, and now speak"
MIR. Stephens told him there was
nothing to say; he had looked out to
see that it was made out, and it was.
Peter was obstinate, and at last Mr..
Stephens told him to make a speech
himself if he thought one could be
made.
81 will" said Peter Bennett, ''if Bobby
Ioombs will not be too hard on me-"
Senator Toombs promised, and Peter
began:
Gentlemen of the jury, you and 1 is
plain farmers. and if we don't stick to-
gether, these ere lawyers and doctors
will get the advantage of us. 1 amt no
objections to them in their proper place;
but they amt farmers, gentlemen oft
jury. Now, this man Royston was
new doctor, and | went for him to come
an to doctor my wife's sore LEG. And
he came an put some salve truck into
1t, and some rags, but never done it one
bit of good, gentlemen of the jury.
don't believe he is no doctor, no way.
There is doctors that is doctors, sure
enough, but this man don't earn his
money; and if you send for him, as
Mrs. Susan Atkinson did for a negro boy
that was worth 81 900, he just kills him
and wants pay for it."
81 don't thundered the doctor.
"Did you cure him?" asked Peter,
with the slow accent of Judge with a
black cap on.
The doctor was silent and Peter pro-
ceeded.
Gas | was sayin', gentlemen of the
Jury, we farmers, when we sell our cot
ton, has got to give vally for the money
we ask, and doctor amt none to good
to be put to the same rule. And L don't
believe this Sam Royston is no doctor,
no how"
The physician again put in his oar
with, "Look at my diploma if you think
/ am no DOCTOR"
ellis diplomat exclaimed the new
f1edged orator, with great contempt.
His diploma Gentlemen, that is a
big word for printed sheepskins, and it
didn't make no doctor of the sheep as
first wore it, nor does it of the man as
now carries it, and 1 pint out to ye that
he amt no doctor at ALL"
The man of medicine was now in
fury, and screamed out: "Ask my pa
tlents if | am no doctor"
81 asked my wife," retorted Peter,
IAN she said as how she thought you
wasn't"
"Ask my other patients," said DIR.
Royston.
This seemed to be the straw that
broke the camePs back, for Peter re-
piled, with a look and tone of unutter-
able sadness:
"That is hard sayin', gentlemen of
the jury, and one that requires me to
die to have powers as I've heard ceased
to be exercised since the Apostles.
Does he expect me to bring the Angel
of Gabriel down before the time and cry
aloud: Awake, ye dead. and tell this
court and jury your opinion of Roy
ston's practiceT Am to go to the tomb
and say to him as is at last at rest from
physic and doctors bills: Get up, here,
you, and state if you died natural
death, or were you hurried up some by
doctors" He says, ASK his PATIENTS
and, gentlemen of the jury, they are all
dead Where is Mrs. Beazly's man
Sam? Go ask the worms in the grave
yard where he lies. Mr.. Peaks woman
Sarah was attended by him, and her
funeral was appointed, and he had the
corpse ready. Where is that likely Bill
as belonged to Mr.. Mitchell? Now in
glory expressin' his opinion on Roy
ston's doctorin.' Where is the baby gal
of Harry Stephens? She is where doc
tors cease from troublin' and infants are
at rest.
Gentlemen of the jury, he has eat
chickens enough at my house to pay for
his salve, and furnished the rags; and
[ don't suppose he charges for maxim
of her worse, and even he don't pretend
to charge for curin' of her; and / am
humbly thankful that he never gave her
nothin' for her innards, as he did his
other patients, for something made UNI
all die mighty sudden"
Here the applause made the speaker
sit down in great confusion, and in spite
of logical restatement of the case by
Senator Toombs, the doctor lost and
Peter Bennett won.