The Northern Pacific farmer. [volume] (Wadena, Minn.) 1878-1885, 1879-10-23
STORY Of A HERRING.
\ herring? Bah!

n herring? Bah!
My dear sir, will you please to take a
reef in your sail and give the herring a
chance. To be sure the poor little smok-
ed and withered object is at best hun
ger and thirst inspiring mess, but if you
follow its career from the time it got lost
from somebody's basket until it ceased
to be used as a promulgator Of human
happiness, you will IN justice to this Cd
eriterous and much scorned fish, confess
that it really had mission.
For a practical, yet modest wielder of
fate, give me the herring that 'Ted"
Harper found as he was going after his
pretty sister at the Bank theatre.
A deceptive parcel it represented, as 1t
lay on the pavement. in white paper,
neatly tied with string, ''Ted' made a
grab for it, with thrill Of joyous cx-
pectation.
''Golly, maybe its bonanzar' he ex-
claimed, rushing toward a restaurant
window near, and eagerly scanning the
parcel, his dirty little digits trembling
with exciting hopes supposed to be hid
den in bonanza.
"Hang it! herring?" Oh, the disgust,
the concentrated disappointment, con-
tanned in the kick that helpless little
tsh received as "Ted" flung it from him
into the gutter.
"Ted' ran his hands down deep into his
pockets, and meditatcd upon the shallow
ness Of hope and the hollowness of life in
general. He had not helped Longfellow
write his "psalm Of life,' but he was the
personifcation of the line.
"And things are not what they SEEM"
'tHang it all" he muttered, IF that
had been million bonanza, me and Nell
would a-gone to the conternent and got
our names in the papers like high-toners
by Jawg."
This last explosive evidently meant
something quite foreign to his mutter-
ings, for he made sudden dive after the
abused herring, and, wrapping it into
neat parcel again, he assumed mild and
business like air, although his eyes twin
killed. with some hidden idea, and entered
the restaurant.
"Say, mister, buy hlnd2:'
"A what?" exclaimed waiter.
"a 'blind'-a something what's got
value and you don't know what it's till
yous paid for it,
"Get out, you little vagabond! None
of your smart tricks here,' the bartender
cried with an angry move toward "Ted;"
but one Of the gentlemen present inter-
fered, saying with jocular glance at
Ted" I
"Let him alone. Come here, my boy,
and give us peep at your 'blind'." But
"Ted" made for the door and would have
escaped if he had not been caught by the
speaker, who laughingly wanted to know
what was in the parcel.
"How shud I know?" "Ted'' retorted,
with the Wit Of an embryo politician.
ss'Taint no put up job, honor bright -
'taint!''
"Where did you get it?''
"Found 1t right outside of this here
door,"
The gentleman took the package from
''Ted's" reluctant grasp, fingered it. smelt
of it and with knowing smile at ''Ted,"
remarked:
"Found it, did you, and, surprising
some of us lost it, thought you would
sell it for the rcward2'
"Ye-as," the young speculat1r drawlcd,
looking down at the end of his nose that
he was diligently scratching to avoid
meeting the humorous scrutiny of his in
terlocutor; then added courteously:
II must go. My sister, she's waiting
for me to take her home, and I guess the
theatre is out now.''
"Oh, no, It's time enough yet for anoth-
or act" the gentlemen replied, OBTAINING
':Tcd" by general force. "fs your sister
young and pretty
You bet!' Tied" cried with enthusi
asm, land she is going to be a second
Lolita after awhile. You see, she amt
been at 1T long yet, but she gets money
enough already to support me'en herr"
$50 you are pair of orphans, are
you?"
II should think so. We amt ALWAYS
been poor, neither; but after mother died
father took opium worse than ever, no.
body didn't buy his pictures and he had
no money to buy paint Then my uncle
you know him as plays the three balls
he got hold Of my father, and it didn't
take long to use us up after that 'Ted"
said this last with solemn wisdom Join
ed with sorrowful comprehension Of his
family troubles that was as touching as
Notwithstanding frem it's apparent
truth, and ridiculous in its efforts to in.
vite attention to the fact that the little
narrator was not of the common "scrub
Stock
''Ted" had by this time quite an audi
ence, who became interested in his world
ly wise ingenious little face. and when
his first friend proposed an ''auction"
then and there to dispose or that mysteri-
Gus ''blind' parcel, the good-natured
crowd fell into the idea with reclamation.
The bidding began with nickle, and
the fun of competition ran into snlllings
very shortly. and after little the narcel