The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1879-05-14
THE BRIC-I-BR1C PAPERS.
Merely a MedIey.
To tte Editor q the Morristown eazette

4
I am in a "Gehenna" of an humol
this morning. You see ! for why
Yesterday was Sunday, aad there
was q mouse.eyed girl in church IN
der a two-foo6 sun-bo7net. I tried
to wink at her 6y retrdetton, and
strained my good eye. Last night
my boys brought home pup. Say
he's a Shepherd Qooks after sheep)
They slowed away their prize in q
bnshel basket. About the time
church yards yawn. Shepherd got
home sick, and began to yelp. /
had just finished one cat.naP, aud,
with cat-nip poultice on my game
eye, was trying another. i remem
bered the dog of Montargis. of Beth
Gelert, of the st. Bernard, but the
whelp was too many for me; and,
in very agony of soul, l groaned,
damn that pap." This morning /
got up wrong end foremost. Reach
ing for my stockings, and trusting
to my hind quarters for locality, l
''turned the turtle" Then. at break.
fast, | ate a piece Of Twin brothers
yeast" believing it lightbread. Ad-
jeurning to she front porch, I stood
with nose in air and hand on hip,
unconscious Of harm, when my bass
drum began to swell. First one but.
ton, then another, until / said ''this
thing must be stopped if it takes all
my resources" l laid down. In
ten minutes my feet were behind
hill. Now when one can't see my
feet he must be cr0ss,eyed or cut of
coal oil. AS RG desperandUno, l
turned the coRVe1 down, and then,
gentlemen, we had an Interesting
private dog.wood winter. When |
the storm had passed over / picked |
up the GAZETTE as a tonic. The |
first pass lighted on that "OkoIona
States" Couldn't you give me a
letter to that fellow? I believe we
could make up momentous inter-
view, They say he's Northern
man. Some mistake sure. Wasn't
ais ma attending the springs? and
lidn't she slip on banana peeling,
Zee a dog fight, horse running
way3-something in a milo way,
you know A Northern mani well,
yell. / took stock in the Major un-
il he Smoked all my cigars. But
hen the mans a Democrat-thacs
o. Don't like Democrats. For a
hange I sought the "Poats corner
o hear from Judge Mckinney.
'oats hasn't done much lately.
'orry for that, as / like to hear about
dcKinney. At last struck oil
worthy of my steel ); ex-
use for profanity. The, birthday
lift of Judge Marks to Wilson and
savage. Liberal, by-jaeks! A cash
transaction too that's business. Let
ne see. This investigation was to bt
nd out how some money went, by
FASTING more, Um, hum! And
Iabry was uncerked; BrownIow's
1ife got a present, and the 'tigators
Ound weak disciple who yanked +,
q dead and gone Callaway. All,
ah! Gallorious! Should one style h
his 'Vestigation q double blanked
umbug, and an Intermediate insult
o public horse-sense? Further;
lass this bonanza putting two
ome guards against New York glad /
ators. A profape Interpolation.
You'd one use naughty words? Nc,
%! Um, hum H "a
But Marks is wise man and loY. /
tn the people. Whom he loveth he
hasteneth. Yet an hopeful; san /
uiRe ouEhills wiihyet ring with the t
hines of prosperous laborI our {
lades blossom as. doth the red-bud !
nd the dog wood, for--.sfisa5s6 . /
There's man in Nashville town -ss8 {
Some folks think wondrous Yise, 4
Who jumped into RBEAISER bush
When sTRABIsAEUs bothered his eyes.
Yet when he found those eyes were worse,
With al his might and mgin.
He made telling, plausible speech,
And those eyes were COOKED again. s :
BRIG A -BRAC.