davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20

1t is related that when James
Russell Lowell was last in Rome,
a mendicant monk met the poet on
the Corso one day and asked for
contribution to repaira monastery.
"You should not ask me for aid"
remarked Lowell in choice Tuscan,
''for | am n heretic." "That makes
no difference" replied the astute
friar; "your money is orthodox
The poet appreciated the witticism
and made the contribution asked.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20

A lovely young lady, at the
time whom bellies were scarcer in
Glasgow than they are now, was
talking with gentleman from a
distance about that city and its
gayeties. The conversation turned
upon balls and the attendance at
them, when the gentleman laugh
ingly asked the question: "Have
you many beauties in Glasgow,
Miss -?n on which the young
lady naively replied: "Oh, yes, sir;
there are five of usW
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20

The Leonard Scott Publish
ing Company.
q; Barclay St., New York.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20
PREMIUMS,

Eew subscribers (applying early for tho
year 1877 may have. without charge, the
numbers for the last quarter of 1876 of such
periodicals as they may subscribe for.
Neither premiums to subscribers nor dis
count to Clubs can be allowed unless the
money is remitted to the publishers. No
premiums given to Clubs.
Circulars with furthet particulars may be
had on application.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20
NEW TODAY.
Wanted for Tucson.

TWO YOUNG LADIES, OF PREPOS-
Il sessing and attractive appearance,
to assist in the wine and cigar business.
Correspondence solicited from those ac-
quainted with the business. Add ress,
G. ID. S.,
al9-lw Tucson, A. Il.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20
LAST NIGHTS NEWS.
PACIFIC COAST.

S'GoCIk HEPoIsT.
SAN FRANCISCO STOCK AND EX-
CHANGE BOARD.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20
TERMS Qncluding Postage):
PAYABLE Strictly In Advance.
CLUBS.

discount of twenty per cent will be al.
lowed to CLUBS of four or more persons
Thus: -Four copies of Blackwood and of one
Review will be sent to ONE Address tor k12 10,
four copies of the four Reviews and Black.
wood for S49, and so on.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20
A Financial Coup.
Mexican News.

NEW YORK, April 10th. We
have city OF Mexico dates to April
10th: Hipolito Ramirez. has taken
~ ReEs<cIIc as e Il he Irepe nh
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20

ST. Louis, April 19-A number
of prominent colored men of this
city have organized a society called
"The Colored Immigration and ~
Assertion" The object of ,ho
Association is to raise funds for The
establishment of colored color les,
and to aid the colored people of lhl
Southern States in moving to her
sections OF the Union. J. Mi n
Turner has been elected Presto
a Nsxre Lyaehea.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20

former imperialist, and after three
days OF official life he resigned,
giving place to Trinidad Garcia,
Minister of Gobernaclou. Edward
Parkhurst taking the latter posi-
ton.
Work is stopped on the Exposi.
tion Building, Garcia refusing to
furnish money in advance of ap-
preparation.
Cortlna is very Ill in prison here.
Daily Los Angeles herald., 1879-04-20
Francisco, Cal.

Many of the manufacturers of
other machines refuse to state their
sales. Why?
Sales of 1878 over any previous
year, $500; average sales for every
working day of the year, l, 1SS.
chine sold by us. Machines sold
Company,
PRING STREET, Los Angeles, Cal.
= H ~" al5-I m
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
why Are SO Many Things So.

Why is it right to steal from the
Government
Why is it wrong to kill the man
who says be told you so ?
Why do people always discuss Eu-
ropean politics as though they under
stood ihemy
Why q man should always get mad
if you frankly aud for bis own good
tell bin be is making fool of him.
self?
Why is it 80 hard 10 find man
when you want to borrow money
from him!
Why is it so hard to borrow the
money af.er you have found him?
Why man always wishes he had
chosen some other profession
Why q man is always going to
take q vacation next Summer 2"
Why a man thinks every year that
be won't be as big fool this yeaf as
he was iastl
And why be is, though, all the
same2
Why a man never tries to best
down the price Of q railroad ,ickets
Why every body effects profound
knowledge Of growing crops and crop
prospects
Why men always lie about the size
Of the FISH they catch and the number
of ducks they shoot?
What girl ever sees in q great
selfish. deceisfol, hulking, animal Of
. man to marry bim for. any how?
Why it takes Eve grown people to
take one sleeping infant to the circus
ITO see the animals Z"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
The Pis's s.art in Life.

The pig is an animal that has its
wits about it quite as soon after birth
as the chicken. therefore selected
il as subject of observation. The
following are some Of my observa-
tions- That vigorous young pigs get
up and search for food al once, or
within one minute after entrance in
the world that il removed several
feet from the mother, when aged only
few minutes, they soon fnd their
way back to her, guided apparently
5y the grunting she makes in answer
to their squeakiDg. Ia the case / ob-
served, the old SOW rose in less than
an hour and half after pigging, and
went out to eat the pigs ran about
and tried TO eat various matters, fol
lowing their mother out, and sucked
while she stood eating. One pig l
put ia a bag toe moment it was born.
and kept it in the dark until it was
hours old, when | placed it outside
the sty, distance of ten feet from
where the SOW lay concealed inside
the house. The pig soon recognized
the low grunting Of its mother, went
along outside the siy struggling to
get over the under or lower bar. At
the end Of FIVE minutes it succeeded
10 forcing its way through uader the
bar at one If the few places where
that was possible. No sooner in,
than it went without q pause into
the pig house to its mother, and was
at once ike the others in its behav-
iOr. Two little pigs | blindfolded st
their birth. One of them i placed
with its mother at once it soon found
the tess and began to suck Six
hours later / placed the other little
distance from the SOW it reached her
in half a minute, af.er going about
rather vaguely; in half q minute
more it found the teat. Next day
| found that one Of the two left with
the mother, blindfolded, had got the
binders off; the other was quite
blind, walked about freely, knocking
against things. 10 the afternoon 1
uncovered It's eyes. and it went
round and round, as if it had had
sight, and had suddenly lost it. In
ten minutes it was scarcely distin-
guishable from one that had sight all
along. When placed Ola char it
knew the height to require consider
ing, went down on It's knees and leap
ed down. When its eyes had been
unveiled twenty minutes | placed it
and another twenty feet from the
sty The two reached the mother
10 fve minutes aud at the same mo-
ment
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

A correspondent in he household
department of the Free Press gives
this advice to ladies, in regard to the
use Of soap: Always use the best Of
soaps for toilet purposes, as cheap
poor soaps do more 10 injuring the
skin than any other cause. The
safest sCap in market is the colorIess
CASTLE olive oil soap is also good
glyeeriDe soap is good for winter use,
especially if the skin is liable to chap;
tar soap is recommended for those
who have eruptions Of the skin oat-
meal soap will make the hands soft
and white Soaps made from vege-
table ellis are much better than those
made from the fats of animals; al
none Gil soap is favoriie on account
Of its delightful perfume taken from
the oil Of which it is made, and
therefore requires no other seeming.
Lard soaps are hard snd solid aud
by some are preferred to vegetable
soaps.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
Oh, George.

They were on the ice, one after
noon, be in The glory of his new found
love, she with brand new pair OF
skates on her pretty feet They were
very sweet on each other and skated
hand in hand, now forward now
backward, gliding smoothly and
gracefully, totally unconscious of the
smiles of the spectators and the chaff-
ing of the small boys. He was skst-
ing backwards and had hold of Der
band, a strong hold with Just the
least more pressure than would have
been desirable under other circum-
stances. He was pulling her along
and talking sweetly the meanwhile;
Darling Celeste, shall we always
glide together through life as smooth
ly as we do now ?
George dear, | hope sol' smil-
ingly
And shall we ever be to each 9th
er as dear as we are nowN
20, George, always
And, Celeste, shall our clasp OF
the band be as warm in the future az
it ia now2'
'0b, George, it will y lovingly.
Dear Celeste, you are so kind
to keep me drst in your affec-'
'Ob, Georger
There was 3 crash before that last
exclamation. Celeste was skating
backward and they were looking into
each others eyes. Her skate caught
in a crack in the ice and there was q
fall-George on top. a series oi
mild shrieks, vision of dimity, and
then two skaters left the ice. Celeste
has lump on the back Of her head
as big as the prize pumpkin, and
Georges nose looks like a ripe 6g
and is all skewed around like a mules
jaw. Oh, George!
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
rsn..,...s.- ss.als. 10, .a A..a.

Nearly forty years ago. in South
Huntingdon township. Wessmore-
land county, lived John Hinton He
was s1 orphan boy, rude aud aneda-
Gated. aud bad wandered there from
the neighborbood OF Masontown,
Fayet,e county. With no known
relatives, be wss kicked about from
one family to another till manhood
EnIisting then in the regular army,
be served in the Florida war At it's
close he helped TO escort The Chero-
KEGS beyond the Mississippi From
the Indian Territory he went to New
Orleans, and shipped as q common
sailor on vessel bound for the East
Indies. At the city of Madras, on
The western shore of the Bay Of Ben
gal. he deserted and enlisted 10 a
British regiment, ia which be served
many years, and during the memo
rabIe Sepoy rebellion was noted for
bis daring bravery. At his discharge
be was presented with gold medal
by the Governor General. He is
next heard of travelling in a cara
van from Delhi westward across the
Indus river, thrt ugh Afghanislan aud
Persia TO Turkey and back.
In time, from trading, be became
immensely wealthy, and was the own
er of FIVE caravans, containing 49,
600 horses and camels, aud fity ele-
phants. la 1864 be visited Cabul,
the capital of Afgbanistsn, for cop
per, great quantities of which are
there mined and smelted. His mag
niicent retinue attracted the atten-
ton of the Emir and be was invited
10 an audicnce-an honor never be-
fore received by Christian A
present of hundred of bis best h0r-
ses aud athFee-tusked elephant, made
the Emir bis eternal friend. When.
yearly, il was followed bv similar
presents, besides camels and mer-
ehsndise, John Hinton had the mo-
nopoly Of trade from the SUBMITS Of
the Hindoo Kosh Mountains 70 the
confines of the Beloochistan, and in
real power was second only to the
Emir himself About 1870 be was
made Military Commander Of the
District of the Herat. and 1876 sup
pressed local rebellion, to the great
satisfaction of bis sovereign. Train
ed 10 the arts Of war among the saw
ages Of North America, and among
the superstitiOus natives Of India,
where be became thoroughly familiar
with British soldiers and resources,
together with his years of service as
the idolized commander of the Mo
hammedan tribal armies Of Afghanis-
taD, amounting to tens of thousands
of halt civilized men, be is to-day the
ablest soldier of Asia-Pitts5urg
TeieqTaDb.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
A Geological Rambie.

Having given the cat-o'nine tails
her milk, and patted the dog in the
manger-he seemed TO smell q rat
| put on my borrowed plumes and
left home just as the cuckoo clock
was striking nine, bent on accom-
plishing one of TWO things-either to
beard lion IN bis den or to break q
butterfly on wheel | called at my
6sh-monger and poulterer's but be
had nothing in his shop except fish
out of water (very much like whale
and March hare; but his wife said
be was absent on wild-goose chase,
and bad set some springs to catch
woodcocks before be went, so would
be sure to have bird in the hand in
the course of the morning. / ordered
a couple of Welsh rabbits, and went
on my way. had bought an ounce
of civet of the spotbecary, when,
hearing cry of Wolff rushed in
to china shop, and there encoun.
tered bull, which I took by the
horns, aud was thanked by the mayor
for my courageous conduct On my
way back crossed the fields, and
had the rare good fortune to catch
weasel asleep, and-attached to the
spot by the erOaking Of a frog out q
wooing (without the maternal con-
sent ito fnd 9 toad With a precious
jewel in his bead Luckily, l saw q
snake in the grass just in time).
Nothing else remarkable occurred,
except that | met the lion of the sea-
son on a white elephant, accompanied
by little dog proud of its side-pock-
cts, AID saw a man with bee in bis
bonnet nursing dear gazelle, and
throwing pbysic to the dogs. / shed
some (crocodile's tears at the sight
Il forgot TO mention that i was pur-
sued by wolf in sleeps clothing,
and bear with a sore head, bot my
dogs of war saved mel. The ca.
was still looking at the king, and the
fox at the grapes, and tie fretful porcu-
pine had not parted with her quills,
when / reached home, where found
g present awaiting me of two dozen
(four-snd-tsenty) blackbirds all
ready prepared tor nv Christmas
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
country Negro VS.. Town Negro.

An eternal warfare seems to rage
between the country negro aud the
town darky. This was illustrated at
q passenger depot yesterday. A color
ed youth from Pike county approach
ed town negro, aud the following
conversation ensued:
'Whar bouts is de ticket Office 2
Right dar 'fo' yo' eyes
'Fo' whose eyes p
'Ione.'
as you 1e ticket oiiice?'
Look yer, niger, don'tyou gimme
none yo' slack
I'm mighty slack man, ole man,
when be gifts stirred up
An you'll git stirred up ef you
STAN roun' yer foolin' longer wild
me-
OATS de kiL' OF excise wat I'm a
pinin' fer
And with that they clinehed and
had lively tussle They were sep
arsted, however, before a policeman
came along, and the Pike county
darkey found the ticket Office The
town negro, it may be as well to
mention, was badly used up.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

Don's think when you have won
wife that you have also won g
slave.
Don't think that you can dispense
with ell the little civilities of life
toward her on marrying. She ap-
preciates those things quite as much
as other women
Don't be gruff and rude at home.
Had you been that sort Of fellow
before marriage, the probabilities are
that you would be sewing on vour
own buttons still.
Don't make your wife feel that she
is an incumbrance on you by giving
her grudgingly. What she needs
give to her as cheerfully as if il
were q pleasure to do SO. She
will feel better. and so will you.
Don't meddle in the affairs of the
house under her charge. You have
no more right to be poking your nose
into the kitchen than she has TO
walk into your place Of bushes and
giving directions and orders TO your
employees.
Don't find fault with her extrava-
gance in ribbons, ETC.. until you have
shut down on cigars, tobacco, beer,
etc.
Don't leave your wife at home to
nurse the children on the score of
economy, while you bolt down town
at night, to see the show, or spend q
dollar on billiards.
Don't bolt your supper, and hurry
off to spend evenings louDging
around away from your wife. Be-
fore marriage you couldn't spend
your evenings enough with her.
Don't prowl in the loa6ng resorts
till midnight, wasting your time in
culpsble idleness, leaving your wife
lonely at home to brood over your
neglect and her disappointment.
Don't think that board and clothes
are sufficient for all wife does for
Won
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
A Girls Competition on Boys.

Boys is strange things. Boys is
Of three kinds-the baby boy the lit
tie boy AID the big boy. / don't
like the baby boy, because be squalls
and kicks, and | must roek bim with
a cradle. But if the big boy or little
boy squalls and kicks, can rock him
with stones. i like the little boy
best when hes got candy aGd gives
me some. But like the big boy
best when it SHOWS, because be can
haul me on sled. A boy is little
man, if be behaves himself, and if be
doesn't, he's little devil; that Is
what mother said brother Bob was
the other day when he told Miss
Smith that mother said she was an
old bore Ny papa said he was
little boy once, bat mother says she
was not and she wishes papa was q
little boy once more. Sister July
says che doesn't like boys, and when
| saw her and Tom Brown q sitting
in the rocking chair Sunday night,
she says sbe was trying to squeeze
the life out of him cause che did not
ike him, but j don't think che was.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

In letter published in Harper's
Weekly of the 18th ult- Commodore
John Marsson, of the navy, comment
ing upon the printed statement that
to Commodore Paulding was due the
credit of having countermanded an
order issued by the Navy Depart
ment directing the Monitor to be sent
direct to Washington from New York,
gives the following narration of bis
(Msrston's) connection with the
matter:
The facts of the case were these,
and received them from the Ad-
miral himself: Commodore Psuld-
ing had been ordered by the Depart
ment to send the Monitor to Hamp-
ton Roads, and she left New York
under those orders. She, however,
had been gone but few hours when
another order was received by Com
modore Paulding from the Secretary
of the Navy, directing him to send
the Monitor to Washington. Com
modore Paulding Immediately dis
patched fast vessel to overhaul the
Monitor, with orders to proceed to
Washington. 1t was too late; the
Monitor had gained too great dis
tance to be overtsken, and the dis
patch-vessel returned to New York
without accomplishing her great OBJ
ject.
At this time | was in command st
Hampton Roads. Some two or three
days before the Merrimac came down
from Norfolk | received from the
Navy Department four kilograms or
dering me most preemptorily to send
the Monitor to Washington immedi-
ately on ber arrival On the night
of the 9th OF March-the day on
which the Merrimac came down and
sunk the Cumberland, and the Con-
gress was burned-at about nine
O'Clock, the little Monitor arrived.
Captain Worden Immediately came
on board the Roanoke and reported
himself to me. | inquired into his
condition. which was not q very ia
vorable one; his men were all green;
they know nothing of that peculiar
armament then on board the Moni-
tor. A few moments reflection,
determined me as to the
course should pursue. / informed
Captain Worden that my orders
were very positive to send the Moni
tor to Washington, but that was
going, at the risk of my commission,
20 disobey those orders and send him
up to Newport News TO look out for
the Merrimac- In this Captain Wor-
deu most cheerfqlIy acDoiesced, and
on the following day the result was
known to an astonished and admir-
ing world.
| have made this correction Of the
sketch of nv much-vslued friend Ad-
miral Paulding for the reason thst,
after a service in the Navy of more
than sixty-six years, / look back on
no part of that service with the pleas
ure and satisfaction | do ON my bay-
ing on that memorable occasion dis
obeyed my orders.
A recent writer { tb.nk) 10 the
United States service, speaking of
the introduction Of new means of
warfare, asks the question, Where
would tie United States at this mo-
ment have been if Ericsson bad not
given Us the Monitor p and may |
not ask the question, Where would
the United States at this moment
have been if had not disobeyed my
ordersg p There was nothing to pre-
vent the Merrimac going to Phila-
New York or Boston, and
the fall of either of those cities would
have been the signal for Europe, but
for England, to scknowl-
edge the independence of the south.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

An Irishmsn, driven TO despera-
ton By the stringeney of the money
market and tire high price Of prOvis-
ions. procured pistol and took TO
the road. Meeting a traveller. be
stopped him with:
Your money or your life -
Seeiag Pat was green at lbe bnsi-
ness, the traveller said {:
''I'll tell ycu what III do III
give all my money sos that pistol"
Agreed"
Pat received the money sad hand
ed over the pistol.
Now" said the traveller, -bsnd
back that money or III bow your
brains out ~
Blaze sgsy, nv hearty" said
Pat niveT dhrsp ofpowder Is there
in ii.n
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
A Quaker wspas's Sermon.


Ny dear friends, there are three
things very much wonder at. The
irst is, that children will be SO foolish
as to throw stones, clubs and brick
bats into fruit trees, to knock down
fruiti if they would let them alone
they would fall down themselves.
The second is, that men should be 30
foolish as to go to war and kill one
another; if let alone they would die
themselves. The third and last thing
l wonder ct is, that young men should
be 80 anxious IS to 60 after the
young women; if they would stay IT
home, the young women would come
after them
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

A good, handy, fast walking team
is more economical al high price
than team which walks slow, or
which is awkward, or OF poor quail
ty. Apoor tool or > poor team is
always dear ct any price, and is one
of the signs of mismanagement and
poverty. An implement should be
ss light IS is consistent with strength
There is . great satisfaction 10 hand
ling excellent tools II is well to be
. little shy Of patent bigh-prieed i'm
plements Of any kind. unless you
hare plenty Of money to spare
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
OUTSIDE AND IN.

Just outside the window.
Through the cold night air.
Snowflakes falling softly,
Dropping here and there,
Covering like q blanket
Ali the gr reund below,
Where the flowers are sleeping,
Tucked In by the snow.
They are dreaming swectly,
Through the Winters night,
OF the Summers morning
Coming sure and bright.
Just inside the window
Firelight ruddy CLEANS;
On tho wall and ceiling
Dance Its merry beams.
White as outside snowffakes
Is the little bed;
On the downy pillow
Rests the curly head.
Like the flowers the child is dreaming
or the long bright hours OF play,
Coming as the darkness meiteth.
Into the sunny day.
And above the sleepers,
Be they child or flowers,
Our loving Father bendeth,
Watching hour by hour
'Tis His love which giveth,
Blessings great or small;
'ris His sun which shineth
Making day for all.
The Churchman.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
PENNSYLVANIA FEMALE COLLEGE


Collegiate year opens September l2ih.
Location miles from Court House,
overlooking East Liberty valley. Easy of
access and free from smoke. Terms for
boarding pupils reduced. For particulars
and catalogue apply 10
MISS HELEN E. PELETREAU.
Acting President.
GEO. a. BERRY. Treasurer.
Aug
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

Song of the dry-goods clerk
Swinging in delainr
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

DI REcroRs FOR THE ENSUING YEAR
Samuel Barclay, Ahram Beam, Benianin Kline
James Parsons, Joseph klein, Joseph j. Saylor.
Josiah T. Walker, Z L. Miller. John Berkley ].
o. kimmel John Hicks Of Somerset county. Pa.
Leonard Bittner and G. A. Williams Of Bediorj
county, Pa.
OLD OFFICERS CONTINUED.
Samuel Barclay, President: J In Hicks, Sec
retary, Treasurer and General gent.
By order OF the Board.
JOHN HIC KS.
Feb. i Secretary.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26

A good dentist is successful man
on the stump.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-02-26
Firm lriends-Psrtners.

The floating pOpulation-Fishes-