The People's vindicator. [volume] (Natchitoches, La.) 1874-1883, 1879-08-16
HUMOROUS CLIPPINGS.

| "sONVSC NAkl IlNGHs
fuck says that 4 man learning to
play the cornet interests aii his
nelghbors-in q horn. "
1t just tickles a fish to death 10
pop bis head out OF the water
and see q crowd OF mortals morning
their unhappy brows on shore.
There are some bills that Pcesi.
dent Hayes will not fluid himself
able to Veto this season. namely !:
NOSE presented 10 him by the mos
quito.
A Mississippi man 2na it thus: "A.
the earnest solicitation 0; tnoae
10 whom l owe money I have coa.
sented to become {. candidate for
county treasurer"
The New Orleans Picayuae notes q
general complaint this year in re-.
gard to circus elephant. "Yhoy ara
exceedingly small AID never XII a
keeper. 49,. "
An lrishman, upon his arrival n
inc United States, noting the Great,
number OF military titles. exclaimed
what devil Of q battle flas heen
fought near here. where all the pri.
have you ever thought how kind
It Is OF the average murderer. to for.
give everybody before he is swung
Grandma: eyes, children. when I
was young as you. are I used to walk
IN my Sleep" Tommy (eaoerivl:
Say, grandma, what time did you
I'm the bright complexion Of youth
We have no such word as PALE" and
sne reached for tho rouge.b box with
the clutch ofan angel.
a bursting soda water fountain
Killed q North Carolina man a few
days ag,. Young women. beware
now you lead young men up to q
When you come right down to
sounds Of industry" q boy. a club
and on old tin pan can do "a much
business as Elk carpenters Working
on new house.
When a boy scrapes a little skin
on hls knuckles while saving wood
Tor his mother, he makes more ado
about 1t than when he knocks his
big toe.nail of In running to a Gre.
This Is Is reliable.
"Ah, yes. my son" said Mr.. Smil.
~. as ne was etrOlling under the
moonltt heavens the other evening.
there are q great many wonderful
things In the armament: for instances
the constellation Of the great bear
which Is go beautifully mixed up
with the Clipper that you have al.
ways to remember that the, tail Of
the dtpper Is the handle Of the bear
In order to tell the other from which,
In one Of the English colonies q
competitive examination was lately
held for the purpose Of appointing
mt persons to some OF the govern.
ment Offices. One Of the candidates
inadvertently spelled the word We.
nice With two ne thus, Venn!ce. The
examiner, q clever man, but not al.
ways 9 correct speaker, sternly in.
quired, do you know. cir. that
there IL but one hen In Venice ?''-
Then eggs must he scarce there"
was the rssdy reply. The candidate
passed. ). -
A ready made clothes peddler com.
planned to one Of our generals 1T the
west that the redskins had Killed his
son "Shakop," and worse than ali.
had stolen twelve pair Of his pants.
The general told him as soon "a he
catched up with the demOns he
would stop their devlltries Tor good
and al: Yes, I know, Shenerel, I
Know" eagerly whispered tho cloth.
Ing dealer. dots alright. but when
you come up NIT dose Indians vot
got dose new pants on, for kracious
sake. Scheneral, tole de soldiers to
shoot high" ".~"
At Southern camp. meeting. held
many years ago, says the Boston
Transcript, were two ministers who
were mutually antagonisttc. One OF
them. Brother Lewis, had q wooden
leg, and, when he was especially
wrought up, would emphasize every
word by thumping 1t on the platform.
During one OF the sessions OF tho
camp'meettng, when the public tent
was crowded, and Brother Davis was
exdorttng With ell the energy 10 his
power: Brother Jones appeared with
= gold.headed cane. Pointing his
long bony finger at him. Brother
Davis exclaimed, Brother Jones.
there'll be no gold.headed canes in
heaven J" NO." said Brother Jones.
angered by tho sudden attack! land
either,