The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-06-18
HANGING is too good for q ffteen-
cent Stamford Aduocate.

HANGING is too good for fifteen
cent chrome. Stamford Aduocate.
A promising young man is chary
of his promises Philadelphia Rec
ord.
, THE New Orleans Times says !;
"Perspiration is the cheapest luxury
of the pore"
Beware of dried apples they live
not wisely, but to swell-Phitddel-
phia Chr0aicle Herald
Tears cannot restore my wife,
therefore | weep" ives the inscrip-
tioI Oh a French tombstone.
THE Legislature has adjourned.
Let US return thanks for this much.
When will Congress follow suit?
President HAYES. is reported as
saying that be is ready ID remain in
W. shipg,oa all summer, taking it
cody in writing veto messages.
"My lord" began pompous young
barrister, sit is written in the book
of nature "On what page, sir-on
What page?" interrupted the judge,
with pen 10 hand.
AL | sh crier at Bsllinsloe being
/ ~ al ,h-. did Al hr
this snnou cement: "Now, then, all
We blackguards that isn't lawyers
must lave the coort."
An ambitious young writer having
asked What magazine will give me
the highest position quickest" was
told: "A powder magazine, if yon
contribute fiery article I"
Let the dogs bark; but, confound
them they shan't do all the growing
not if the rorty-odd millions of people |
in the United States know them
selves - Boston Transcript
Norristown Herald: What news
paper does an editor remind you of!n
asks subscriber in the country. He
reminds US of the Christian at Work,
but this is not the answer furnished
with conundrum.
THE Presidential fever is raging
fearfully now There is hardly a
man in either House Of Congress
who hasn't caught it, aud nearly
every Governor from Maine to Texas
has got the symptoms
SENATOR WALLACE is ia favor Of
adjourning without passing the Army
bill, aud thinks that course would be
approved by majority Of the Demo-
Gratis. Yes, and disapproved by
majority of the people.
THE author and inisher OF the
shot guB policy in Mississippi has
jus. been made Chief Justice of that
State This is pretty fair indica-
tion of the sort Of justice which viii
be dispensed in future in tie Com
monwealth where Chisolm was mur-
dered
A pickpocket taken with bis hand
in some one else's pocket endeavor-
ing to invent sill manner Of impossible
explanations of the phenomenon
Whats the use of trying to lie about
it so clumsily ?" said the Magistrate,
benevolen,ly; haven't you law
yer 7"
Peter the Great once said: God
established wedlock for happiness, for
mutual support, and for consolation
in the vicisitudes of life, and, as
wreiched marriages do not sustain
Gods purpose in mstrimony, it is
proper, in such cases, to grant d.
vorce."
SENATOR BUTLER declares that the
Democrats forced the extra session
because they thought party capital
could be made By securing the organ
ization of the House before the party
became any weaker He does not
estimate the amounsof capital which
has Been accumulated up to date.
Nor Q single measure has been
brought forward by the Democracy
of the For,y-sixtb Congress for the
benefit of the G1vernmsni, the in
provement of its revenues. the aG
vancement of it, interests or the en-
and fostering Of the
labor source on which il depends for
revenues.
THE Republicans Of Blair county /,
at their recent primary election, vo- |
ted by very large msjority to abol-
ish the Crawford county system Of
nominating candidates. They adopt
ed the system about six years ago +.
wheu, indiug it worked in the same
manner es il has 10 this county, they
voted to abolish it.
CONGRESSMAN MORSE, the only
Democratic Congressman from Mass !
aehusetts, is credited with saying T
that there is no longer Democratic c
party in his State, the present Con-
gress having killed it. If Congress
viii only keep at i; long enough, the =
same thing may be said Of he whole g
North presently. IT
A prominent attorney residing 10 t
Syracuse, while fishing day or two q
since, pointed cut to bis companion q
remarking, The fellow O
that put up that sign is liar" :
"Wby p asked his companion Be @
cause that sign reads, "No fishing in t
this brock" aud caught tie best
trou, 10 my basket directly uuder f
that board. Rochester Onion. 6
THE Democratic members Of the |
House Committee on Elections have
Z