Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1879-12-12
Hawk -Eyetems.


There are several kings in Europe
Who are total rex
What bull vas that Of Utica Her
sd printer. The editor wrote David
Dudley Field "a chief" and the print
or got il " q thief"
The cunning season is now at hand,
and the doctors have laid out their
probes and are patiently awaiting the
arrival Of the victims.
Colonel Ingersoll's party has been
planted so late in the season it will be
apt to be caught by the early frosts be
fore its bloom is really to pull.
Della White invited her friends in
Greenburg, lad, to what she called a
surprise party and surprised them by
getting married in their presence.
John Bright says Wendell Phillips is
the greatest orator living. HIM; ha;
yes to be sure-but, John /;
say, John, you never Heard "us," did
you?
What is the L. p church 2"
young Dumfries asked his friend. who
is a railroader from Nebraska. Union
Pacific. replied the conductor, don't
you know anything
1t must make General Grant and Dom
Pedro feel awful lonesome when they
ref, ct that they have been everywhere
and seen every thing excep: the north
pole and Halley's comet.
They asked a crier in one of the
courts if he did not find it difficult t.
while away the time during the hearing
of dry eases. "Oh, no, was the
reply, ! just lean my heal back and
SLEEP the sleep of the Judge
Two girls have been been scalped
lately by their hair catching in ma
D chinery. Thus. says the Boston Com
meyciai Bulletin, does modern iaven-
ton not only diminish the opportunities
of labor, but actually begins to rob the
poor Indian of his birthright.
"How shall We stop the strikers q
asks New England paper. Well, with
your right generally, and keep your
lett we'll up in front of you. When
You cant stop heavy one, it is allow.
able to dodge it. But if you really
don't know how to stop them, keep out
Of the ring.
"What brought Grant home?" mys-
teriously demands Missouri contsm.
porary. We didnt.follow the game
close, but he might have got in on
hard hit to center field, or hot liner
to third. badly muffed. OF daisy cut.
ter out to left field; it's easy. enough to
get home when you are on third and
have q lively hitter at the bat.
Mark Twain contributes twenty five
dollars towards defraying the expenses
of the battle-fag celebration at Hart
ford, but takes it out of the money he
intended to spend for pew in church.
The following is his defense of that
course: ''There is nothing nobler
than for religion to support patriotism,
and nothing wiser than for both to up
hold and encourage domestic economy;
therefore substract this sum from the
pew rental
The EDIrOR's RETURN FROM SUMNER
VACATIoN.-The summer is past. The
=, vacation is over. The summer parties
are broken up, and the summer friends
have gone home. The ducks we shots
are still flying around, happy as the
uuCho VIC ulu uOL buOOt. 4u6 trout We
caught are growing in weight and size
from day to day. The memories of
mountain and fores. and sea linger to
to fill the coming winter days with the
grace of summer sunshine. No more
the fond musquito winds his mellow
horn; the black ant haunts alone the
long. long-deserted picnic grounds. no
good man settles on his sand built nest. |
The grape smiles out in ruddy bloom
where erst the strawberry Knocked the
languid pocket book. The sound of
the agricultural horse trot" is heard |
in the land, as the honest man wanders
from fair to county fair, enters his
horse in all the races, under as many
different names as there are counties in |
the United States. Again the agricul
tural associations are making enough
money on the gambling privilege to pay
the premiums on needle work and
sausage on the hoof. Gone is the sal.
mon red; gone is the book of the flies
gone is the internal economy of the
pocket.book; gone are several things. |
The breezes of September sigh dreamily !
through the rustling blades of the
ripened corn, and the wide lecture field
smiles with the promise of harvest.
We have been home about twenty -four
hours-hallo ! train time already
Time We were off for Colorado.
For the Ladies.