Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1879-02-06
sips ofFun.

-. AnA AittS AO0o Ou NesA - -
the shoemaker mildly suggested
to lady customer.
Truth is stranger than fiction.
A man may know that he is
liar, and yet he'll feel decidedly
strange when he called is one.
Young housewife--"What mis-
cradle little eggs againl You.
really must tell them, Jane, to
let the hens sit on them a little
longer!''
When you want to get the
best of an argument with wo-
man of thirty, you should lead
off with: "Now, then, woman
of your age" etc.
The indianapolis journal said
, the other day; "There is no par
ticular necessity for searching
for the North Pole just now.
1t is searching for us. "'
) "Young men may die" cheer
fully remarks an insurance cir
cular on our table, cod men
must" This may be right, pro-
fessionally. but doesn't it sound |
rather peremptory on the old
men?
When man dies suddenly,
"without the aid of the physi-
cian," the coroner must be call
ed IN. If man dies regularly, |
after being treated by doctor,
everybody knows why he died
and the coroner's inquest is not
necessary.
A physicians little daughter,
called upon for toast, gave:
''The health of papa and MAN.
ma and all the world" But she
suddenly corrected the senti-
ment. "Not all the world, for
then papa would have no
patients"
"IIow on earth do you man
age to get along so we'll? !
thought thqt only three or four
years ago you were head over
heels in debt" ooh, those were
old dcbts;I never pay old debts"
"But your new ones?" 81 let
them set old"
What would you do if a girl
kissed you?" said one ten-year-
Iold urchin to another, as they
discussed the latest society news.
"What would I do? I'd kiss her
back. What would you do?"
"Kiss her mouth" was the por-
tentious reply.
"Do you mean to call me
har?" asks a ferocious old gem
tleman. "Well, no, not exactly" |
temporizes his young friend; h
"but if | saw you in the compa-
ny of Ananias and Sapphira, /
should say you were in the bo- :
som of your family"
A Sunday School pupil of ten
der age being asked how he ik-
ed the gentleman who had adj 9
dressed the school, remarked: a
He was a funny man. He told +
about the hand writing on the =
wall, and said it was 'Minnie,
Minnie, tickle the parson." L
The eccentric genius who de- :
lights in statistics says that every L
man eats on sn average eight
bushels of wheat in the course of f
a year. We can point out men n
who consume a! least twenty-five r
bushels of corn in the same time, I
but they don't take the trouble 20 , /,
chew it. =
A young man objected to the :
girl that his rich uncle wished
him to marry. "You mustn't be c
SO particular" said the exasper- I
ated uncle. 81 tell you she's G
well enough" $50 she is, un-; !,
cle,D responded the nephew, "and
you know you've always taught
me to leave well enough alone" s.
1t was a very honest old IT
Dutch Judge in Schoharie conn :.
ty, n. Y, who listened for sew .
eral hours to the arguments of Il
counsel and then said: "Dis case d
has peen ferry ably argued on
both sides, and dare have peen .,
some ferry nice points of law ! !
brought up. / shall take dree y
days to consider desc points, Ia
but / shall eventually decide 81
for de plaintiff. e.
That was good, though rathert III
a severe pun, which was made G,
by Princeton student (and he q
was not one of the brightest Of !
the class either), when he asked, !"
''Why is Professor = the great
est revivalist of the age?" and,
on all "giving it up" said: "Be- W
cause at the end Of every sermon a,
there is a great awakening :,
Nine. c. calls at a friends b,
house on a wet day, and her feet q
being damp, says to her friend, A
'sMy. dear, will you let your maid
bring me a pair of your slippCrs?" to
aMy love-" replies her friend oI
there are several people in the IN
parlor) edo you think my slippers ia
will fit you?" 40, think so,