Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1879-09-11
sips of Fun.

y Stealing a march, in fact sew
leral of them-robbing a music
ristore.
A clock and a business con-
! Germ have to be wound up when
they run down.
The editor of the Oil City
Derrick claims to have a coun-
Itry-seat. 1t is a stump.
"Throw him a rope" is the
proper thing to say when you see
! a friend Of yours over bored.
/ The ebb and flow of the tide
Irefers only to married men who
Igo out early and come in late.
It is strangely singular how
much the boy with a pair of new
Isuspenders hates to wear a coat:
/ We like man with lots of
temper. 1t is the man who gets
out Of temper that we don't like.
i "TTe twisted mules TAIL" is
Ithc simple but incisive epitaph
on a Wisconsin farmers tomb
stone.
i Sol, Sob "why persecutest
thou me?" exclaims Texas pa
Iper, whose editor evidently has
been sunstruck.
The saying, "the better the
day the better the deed" doesn't
apply to conveyance Of prop
erty on Sunday.
Wives Of great men oft remind us,
We should pick out wives with care;
so we may not leave behind US
/ Half our natural crop of hair. Il
] Man wants but little here be-
low. True, and soda in the
breakfast biscuit is no exception
to the general rule.
"Who cut your hair?" is a
slang expression, but to give it
full force it should be addressed
to a bald-headed man.
The old goat tried to butt a
circular saw, and the subsequent
proceedings were but a trifie to
what the bucksaw.
GLOW to get a Husband" is
the title of a new work. One
way, girls, is to get your moth
ers to take in boarders.
If the women of this country
would get along without ribbons,
they would save $14, 100000 per;
year to help the men purchase
cigars.
Said the Sheriff, when he skill
fully adjusted the rope: "This is
| a disagreeable duty, my dear
fellow, but the line must be drawn
somewhere !"
One grocer asked another; t1s
Colonel - a man to be trust
ed?" 81 think you'd find him a
So" was the reply. off you
trust him once you'll trust him
forever. He never pays"
Willie asked his mother
where stars came from. Her
reply was: "My son, 1 do not
know DWELL, I do" he said,
"the moon laid 'em."
A Texas man who invented a
patent car-coupler was bumped to
death at its first trial. His wild
ow will dispose of the right very
cheap to some good talker.
Lightning has struck several
church spires this season and lett
unharmed the modest and unpre-
Etentious gin shop. These are
things that puzzle the preachers.
"Well, Pat, you didn't come
to the 2 o'clock train TO get me
as / told you" "Oh, indade /
did sor; but OF got there too
late for that train, and so OF
waited for the next one"
The reason why a Detroit wo-
man got off q street car without
ringing the bell was because she
saw her husband walking with a
good-looking widow, and she had
no time for ceremony.
One who prides himself that
~ am a plain, blunt man, who
always says what l mean," and
accordingly goes about sayingI
all things at all times, without
regard to courtesy, discretion or
Christian kindness, is not mod
el of frankness, but rather a So
cial pest.
/ There are some persons in this
world of such a cheerful ma
ture that if you tell them you
have the toothache they viii inn
mediately sit down and enumer-
tate all the persons they know
|who have died in commissions
from that terrible and dangerous
disease.
A writer in the Madisonyille,
Tenn, Times, having been to
the recent election, made discov-I
lery in a straw stack the other
day of a "snake with two legs
lowered with hair ike a gray
4 ~ r n