St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1879-01-17
Squibs.


baby's nurse.-Hdrtf0rd Post.
The man who was carried away bv
his feelings has returned safe.
Boston Commercial Bulletin 4 lum-
Der dealer failed last week-could not
pay his board bills.
A pair of ears that go on the head of
civilizatiOn-pioneeIs and frontiers.-
Boston Commercial Bulletin.
An old lady said she had often seen
''men struck with Il happy thought, but
could never see where it hit 'em'
Timely warning 10y the Boston Her.
| aid: The So gold piece is very con-
venient coin to mistake for Il cent. Be
careful or you will get one passed to
you without knowing it.
A Bridgeport three-years old accom-
plished a task the other day by tip
tOeing, and joy fully exclaimed: 81 did
it mamma but | had to stand on my
hind legs"
A typographical blunder made the
New Haven Palladium recently an
nounce that the united workers of that
city had received $50 worth of peanuts,
instead of permits, as Il donation.
''Pants for S5 ?" said a seedy looking
man, reading the sign i'll the window
of clothing store he was passing. $50
do |. never painted so for five dollars
in all my life"
The Detroit Free Press says: "The
gang of burglars who worked for seven
straight hours to hammar safe to
pieces, to secure fourteen cents, know
how country minister feels next day
after donation visit"
Rabbi Joshua once met a boy who
carried something in covered vessel.
my boy" said the rabbi, "what have
you in your covered vessel 2" ''If it
was intended for you to know" replied
the boy, ''it would not be covered"
A Lima IN. W woman, who lately
broke the handle from a
china cup, rashly exclaimed that she
wished none of them had handles.
Later on it became necessary for the
to explain matters, and
she proceeded tO do so by saying: SIN
dade, marm, and yes said we'd prefare
to hev the hanthels off, and We see |
have done it rale noice."
Little Laura was tired and sleepv
when she prepared for bed, and forgot
to say, "Now | lay me-" and in an
apology to her mother for her neglect
said, us she tugged away at her little
II touldn't go to heaven to-
night, mamma, any way in the world,
tos Pm too tired"
When butcher marries the daugh-
ter of a cattle drover, their friends
should not include among the wedding
presents ''HOgg's Tales" the Works
of Bacon" and 'Irish Bulls" bound in
calf. They might consider such gifts
slightly PERSONAL Worcester Gasette.
A man in this town froze the bottom
of his feet lately, and as he held them
to the stove he remarked, 1.-TWO soles
with but single thaw t."- Whitehall
Times.
''See how l ride over the raging
maner exclaimed the man who was
thrown over his horses head into a
ditch on the other side of the fence
HdckenSack Republican.
"Where did Cain find his wife p
Ihls was query New York divine
put to his audience by way of text, last
morning. We should think the
answer must depend a good deal upon
the time of day, or night, when he was
looking for her, If he found her abed
and asleep when he came home from
''the LODGE" at ever so many o'clock,
she was better wife than the murder
some old villain .-MarlborO
Times.
Yarn by the Boston Post Lowell is
the splnsters' city, Lowell Courier.
You seem to have got the thread of that
Boston Post. And now it will
go bobbin around the whole country.-
Worcester Gazette. We hope not.
It's spinner long ways already.-TPost
again. The Lowell Courier is reel
sharp. All wool hope this is the end
Wor. Gazette. Yes, but we fear it will
loom up again. Post.
A man once offered to bet that he
could prove that this side of the river
was the other side. His challenge was
accepted, and pointing to the opposite
shore OF the river he asked-'tIs not
that one side of the river?n "Yes.n
was the answer, of course. Agreed
SAID the man "and is this not the
other side 7" Certainly said the
other. 'Then," said the man, "pay me
Ghe wager, for by your own confession
nave proved that this side of the river
is the other side" The dumbfounded
antagonist, overcome by this profound
logic, Immediately paid the money