The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1879-06-18
Mr.. Bankers Picture.

MI. Bankers Picture.
r "Youra charge against Mr.. Barker, the
artist here said the Magistrate, sis as
Isault and battery, belieye?''' saS !. Il
yes, sir" ~ 5@ EE7R#& 1851 y
And your name is
"Potts! am art critic of the Weeklv
Spy"
Estate your case ,.,.,,.sE ~ .As
Il called at Mr.. Barker's studio upon
his invitation to see his great picture, just
finished, of George Washington cutting
down the cherry tree with his hatchet.'
Mr.. Barker was expecting to sell it to
Congress for fifty thousand dollars He
asked me what I thought of it, and after
I had pointed out his mistake in making
the handle of the Ratchet twice as thick
as the tree, and in turning the head of
the Ratchet around so that George was
cutting the tree down with the hammer
end, 1 asked him why he foreshortened
Georges leg so as to make it, look as if
his left foot was upon the mountain on
the other side of the rlver.rr ,srs ~S,srf
| odd Mr.. Barker take it kindly?''
asked the justice. Il rs - ann
swell, he looked a little glum; that's
all. And then when I asked him why he
put guinea pig up in the tree, and why
he painted the guinea pig with horns, he
said that it was not a guinea pig, but a
COW, and that it was not in the tree, but
in the background. Then said that if
had been painting George Washington
[ should not have given him the COM
plexion OF a salmon brick; I should not
have given him two thumbs on each
hand; and l should have tried not to slew
his right eye around SO that he could see
around the back of his head to his left
ear. And Barker said, 'Oh, wouldn't
ypu?' Sarcastic, Your Honor. And I said
no, I wouldn't; and I wouldn't have
painted oak-leaves on cherry tree, and
I wouldn't have left the spectator in
doubt as to whether the figure off by the
woods was a factory chimney or steam
boat, or George Washington's father tax
ing smoke" a E.sGt#R ..&&EF
(Which was it," asked the Magis-
trate. ....y. ..,,fas -.s.~,ss 81
II don't know. Nobody will ever know.
So Barker asked me what I'd advise him
to do. And 1 told him I thought his best
chance was to abandon the Washington
idea and to fix the thing up somehow to
represent the Boy who stood on the Burn
ing Deck Itold him he might paint
the grass red to represent the flames, and
daub over the trees SOS itwould look like
the mast, and pull Georges foot to this
side of the river SOS it would rest some
where on the burning deck, and maybe
! he might reconstruct that fractory chin
ney Or whatever it was, and make it the
| Captain, while he could, arrange the
guinea pig to do for the Captains dog"
| did he agree?" = <e%Ses3s9$ @ssS =.
! ;:'He said the idea didn't strike him.
So then I suggested that he might turn
it into Columbus discovering America.
Let George stand for Columbus, and the
tree be turned into native, and the
Ratchet made to answer for a flag, while
the mountain in the back ground would
answer for the rolling pillows of the ocean.
He said he'd be hanged if it should.
So I mentioned that it might,
perhaps, pass for the execution
of Mary, Queen of Scots Put George in
black for the headsman, bend over the
tree and put a frock on it for Mary, let
| Viz 1dVNlCI SC<tuu, duO WOlh LII Lllc guinea
pig and the factory chimney as mourners.
But Barker said that there would be
somebody worse hurt than Mary, Queen
of Scots, if kept ON ... o's.-.
"Didn't like it, hey?2 &s@ &a.@&*a
II s'pose not. And / said, that while
did not want to force my advice upon
him, 1 would say, if my opinion was
asked, that the best hope of that picture
would be to make, it representation OF
the, Deluge. Build in an ark around
George, put shirt on him and call him
| Noah, crowd in other animals with the
guinea pig, letlthe facto;y chimney; do for
Mount Ararat, and the tree for the stove
pipe projecting from the roof of the ark.
Justnas I had got the words out of my
mouth Barker knocked me clean through
the picture. My head tore out Washing
toms near leg, and my right foot carried
away about tourEmiles Eof the river. We
had it over and over on the floor for
a while, and finally Barker whipped. I
am going to take the law of him in the
interests of justice and high art.p RI
- So Barker was bound over, and Mr..
Potts went down to the office of the Spv
tc write up lis criticism Has Adeler, IN n
N. T.lWeekzgsSi III IL ~&F5Sa3Rs 4