The weekly herald. [volume] (Cleveland, Tenn.) 1876-1888, 1879-08-07
A LEAF FROM A DIARY.

intensity like pain in the feeling, as If
touch, breath might send me from
such an extreme down to misery. How
unconsciously i came to this lonesome
place, never guessing that here / was t.
find everything my own life and nature
loDged for in Priscilla Burnsl / canno
tell when / first realized that she formed
part OF my daily thought and living
but from my first glance at her she ne
yer seemed like any one else. can cal
| up distinct pictures of her which have
photographed themselves forever on my
memory; once sitting by the fire en-
broidering purple and gold pansies on
some dark, somber wooden stuff, n soft
flush on her cheek, the soft white hand
fitting back and forth with the needle
a picture for q man to frame on his own
hearthstone; Penelope at her loom
could no moro clearly have typified the
perfect union Of lowIy domestic cares
and graces; then again, as she comes in
from school white and tired, every spark
Of animation gone from her face.
With a seemingly naughty indiffer-
ence which really covers shyness, when
approached on ordinary topics, she glows
and forgets herself in speaking of higher
things. l have at last persuaded her to
read German before me, and though her
sbyness would hardly allow her to do it,
she was only impelled, I am sure, by a
stoical anxiety to be criticised for her
own good. Her accent is poor, as it may
we'll be, she having been for the most
part her own teacher, but her enthusi-
asm and tue appreciation Of every
beauty are enough to inspire any one.
/ have given up the solitary evenings
in my own room that we're at first so de-
lightful. Priscilla, who does not have
the luxury Of fire up stairs, takes her
place every night in the sitting-room,
and with only good Mrs. Pickering for
an audience, who is half the time asleep,
We talk till the butcher, the baker, the
candle.stick maker comes in from their
respective haunts at nine o'clock.
She is kind and friendly to me simply
because she is so unconscious. With no
society here, no friends who care for the
things she is fitted to appreciate, be-
lieve she is somewhat grateful for the
pleasant hours we have spent together;
they have made variety in her monot-
onous life. Is that all? It must not,
shall not be all. Every grain of will,
every impulse within me are bent on this
one point, to make her love me. When
with her am calm and composed as she
herself. l dare not lose one degree of
control for fear of frightening by the in
tensity OF my passion. Enough of rhap-
sody must do as have begun to do
toward Tom, avoid mentioning her name,
for it leads me further than care to go.
Poor Tom he writes TO ask why my let
ters are so short and business-like and
why never speak Of the school-teacher
who occupied four pages while ago.
I shall not tell him now. Ii am to be
happy he will know it. then, if I am not
but cannot provide for that alterna-
tive. For the first time in my life am
living altogether in the present, with no
thought Of the past that was like dream
compared with this substan 70 Of reality.
One week which had been long
enough to carry me through sufficient
gradations and revulsions of feeling to
furnish metaphysican with material
for years Of speculation. But the meta
physical aspect is of no Importance to
me; 1 can only think Of my real, human
happiness. There has been a change to
my watchful eyes in Priscilla, shyness
in her manner toward me, an avoidance
of my society. 1t cut me to the heart,
for I was too stupid to dream it might
be anything but dislike. One night I
met her on the shore when she was re-
turning from call on some sick scholar
or indignant parent, and stung to the
quick by her cool good evening and
evident desire to leave me, broke
bluntly, even rudely into the truth. She
was startled, almost frightened I believe.
To my accusation that she had wholly
ignored me she had not a word to say,
and then-but even if l could recall
what | said next l would not write it.
only care to remember that she yield
ed to my impetuosity and owned that she
loved me. After that no demur nor OBJ
lection to our love could or can ever
move me. For she has objections, seri
ous ones, she says. which she names with
q gravity only equaled by the ease and
gayety with which / overthrow them
all. 'In the first place, said Priscilla,
4 am not your equal in some points.
Perhaps personally may be, but our
positions in society are 80 different. You
are rich know, and though you are free
from any assumption Of superiority one
could tell from your manner that you
are accustomed to what is more refined
and luxurious in life; used to eating with
q silver spoon, in fact. Your wife must
be woman fitted to shine in society,
and l could never, never fill the place
you offer me-. At the grave dropping oi
her tone here am so iubilant, SO ar.
rogant in my new happiness that
laugh scornfully at her weak little argu