davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1879-07-19

Rag Carpets, of our own make, from 80
cents up. L. Nicklas * Bro, Mar,insburg-
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1879-07-19

per gallon, at Lemen's.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
A COlOred Voters Advice to Grant.

After the arrival of Gen. Sherman in
this city, on Thursday, one of our col
ored men visited him in the Larkin
House parlor, and, extending his hand
opened fire thusly:
tT"How yo' is, Generalf" ..
How are you? how are you? Where
did | first have the pleasure of your &C
quaintance?" replied the General, shak-
ing hands,
q 20, Twas wild 20 down dar at Shiloh!
| reckon yo' must hab seed me for was
dar." $3.50 - 1JrEs ait.ssss tl.t5
who was your officer and what regi-
ment were you in?"
,al "We1l, now, I don't zac1y member
dat, but was dar, an was wild yo' up az
Columby, ySouf Kaliny, too By de
way, Central, whar's Central Grant?"
aqFAh, he is in Egypt, and is about to
visit Eden!" was the reply. a".19l ai-]
~, "'Haw, haw, haw! OATS too good, too
good; but look here, Central Grants a
moughty smart man, an we gemmen of
de Souf would Like to hab him for de
three term, but if he gwine to Edum he
had better stay dar, for he mought neb-
Der git de chance agin."- Palatka Her
aid. t'4 @
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13

standing at his side the very man whom
he had compimented. T beg your
pardon" said the gallant Colonel; :" I
would not have made the remark had
known you were near me, and am ready to
make the most humble apology for my
objectionable rudeness; but looking
first at the insulted member of Con-
gress, whose face was anything but
lovely. and then at the animal compared
to him" hang it if I can tell whether
| ought to apologize to you or to the
monkey"
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
Another California Wonder.

q "A natural washing machine has been
discovered in Tulare county, Gal. A
boiling spring was found by fellow
with an ingenious turn of mind, and he
at once secured a water-right, construct
ed a clothes-wringer to be run by a
water-wheel at one side of the ospring,
where it, boils over into another of
clear cold water, into which he placed a
sack Of blue indigo. The ranchers of
the settlement throw their clothes into
the water, which has a wnirling motion,
and they are drawn in out Of sight. In
about five minutes, they come to the
surface, float to the wringer, and are
run through into the spring, where
they are rinsed by passing through
another Wringer. In less than thirty
minutes the washing is done.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
THE NEW CENSUS LAW.
A Summary of It's Provisions.

The law provides for the appointment
by the President of one or more Super
visors Of Census in each State and Fer
ritory, the whole number not to exceed
$50. Each Supervisor is charged,
among other duties, with that of pro-
posing to the Superintendent of the
Census at Washington the apportion-
ment of his district into subdivisions
most convenient for the purpose of
enumeration, and to designate to the
Superintendent of Census suitable per-
sons, and, with the consent of said Su-
perintendent, to employ such persons as
enumerators within his district, one for
each subdivision, and resident therein,
who shall be selected solely without refer
ence to their fitness, and with refer
ence to their political Or party affilia-
tions, according to the apportionment
approved by the Superintendent of
Census. The enumerators are RESPONSE
BILE to the Supervisor, and each Super
| visor to the Superintendent of Census.
Each Supervisor is to receive $500 in
full for all services rendered and ex-
penses incurred, except that an allow
ance for clerk-hire may be made at the
discretion of the Superintendent. OF
course the. Government furnishes all
blanks, instructions, etc. The law pre-
scribes the duties of the enumerators
and the information they are to obtain
very fully. The subdivision assigned
to any enumeration shall not exceed
1000 inhabitants, according to the census
of 1870, nor shall any such subdivision
contain less than 5000 inhabitants in
any case where tie last preceding
census shows the number of inhabitants
thereof. The boundaries of all sub
divisions shall be clearly described by
civil divisions, rivers, roads, public sur
veys, or other easily distinguished lines
Enumerators east of the Rocky mount.
aims are to receive not more than 81
per working day, and those west of the
mountains $6 per day for actual field
work. In Lieu of this per diem, the Su-
perintendent of the Census, in subdivis-
ions where he shall deem such allowance
sufficient, may allow enumerators not
exceeding 2 cents for each living in
habitant, 2 cents for each death report
ed, 10 cents for each farm, and Is cents
for each establishment of productive in
dustry enumerated and returned, in fall
compensation for all services. Emu
merators are required to take an oath
for the faithful performance of their
duties, and g penalty is affixed for vio-
lating the same, as also for the refusal
of any person to give the information
required by law. This information is
to be furnished by the heads Of fami-
lies, or, in the absence of O. head, of
family, by any member over 20 years of
age, and in the case of corporations and
companies by any authorized officer
The inquiries embrace those used in the
last census, with many important addi-
tons. and the census. when complete,
will present much the most complete
exhibit of the population, wealth, bust
ness and social condition of the, country
that has ever been made. The act APP
propriates $3,000.000 as the maximum
cost of the census, exclusive of printing
and engraving. .,.{ - y.I,Htf - r. ft.t = ~
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13

er, for / was born at sea-all my money.
mind, goes straight to the Seamens
Hospital, every penny of it.
"'But what am I to do?' I asked of
my uncle; how shall I be able to carry
out such strange condition? Have
you SO expressed it in your vill?'
:" sYes, indeed, have he answered !:
and legal and binding you'll find it, as
expressed in the words, so long as I am
well above ground."'
:" But what am [ to do with you? I
again asked.
"sOh, run me up aloft; masthead
me; anything you like, but don't bury
me-
+" Well" went on Mr.. Gayling, to
make long story short, I found that
the conditions of the old mans will
were binding, and his executors and
myself hit upon the plan of hosting the
coffin on to the roof of his house.
Under certain conditions we found that
it was possible for us legally to do this.
So | dismissed my three servants, en-
ployed country undertaken, my old
ships carpenter, and foreign glazier,
in order that the matter should not be
talked of in the neighborhood, and per-
sonally saw the arrangements carried
out. You can now understand my rea-
sons for not having it meddled with
yes, sir; and you can now understand
that the condition of the will must take
effect. No sign of the coffin or the
body even was to be discovered in the
ruins of chat house. I have had rigid
search made, to no purpose; the old
gentleman's remains have been con-
sumed, have mingled with mother,
earth, and the money passes as matter
of course to the Seamen's Hospital.
have not a penny in the world. What
can you do for me?"
It is not necessary for me to say what
I did for Mr.. Gayling, but finding by a
visit to Doctors Commons, and other
evidence, that his story was substantial
~ correct, [ felt his case was a hard one,
certainly a strange one, and I acted,
hope, not ungenerously toward him.
AU The Year Bound.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
A COLLEGE WIDOW.

What, been in the city all summer,
And grinding away on your Greek!
Well Welt You'll excuse me, old fellow,
But, really, you are getting weak.
Conditioned, What OF it? I'm always
Conditioned--a regular stack;
But work them off somehow or other
And keep myself straight with the Fac.
why, of course Tom, you ought to have cut it
And gon g off with me and st. Clair;
No end of nice girls and salt water,
And lots of our fellows down there.
ff YOU want any points on Nantucket,
Or any adventures to hear,
Just call for them ad minimum.
While Fritz has gone after the beer.
Any snab? Well, you'd think so to see them!
Every girl was a regular belle;
ALI the tone of New Haven and Boston,
And other ones equally swell.
But one of them, Tom was sumner;
She brought down her game on the wing,
For in less than six hours, by jingo!
She had every man on string.
Pretty? Rather! Her teeth were like pearls, sir,
Peeping out between coraline bars,
And her eyes, when she smiled on fellow,
Just twinkled like midnight cigars.
She captured our whole delegation,
Trinity junior Ia swelD,
Two cheeky sub Freshmen from Harvard
And a couple of Sophs from Cornell.
Well. we used to walk out in the evening
To watch the moons crescent arise,
And some of us thought of the landscape,
But the rest of us thought of her eyes;
And when on the murmuring water
The silvery light was aglow,
1t appeared like vision of Eden
TO the Freshmen especially sol.
Such is lifel Here, I'll show you the locket
She gave at parting; and Will
Has bangle of hers in his pocket
We keep them for memorable
AS for me, though, wasn't enraptured,
In spite of the rose-tint and pearl
For somehow I'm never cOntented
With only tenth of a girl
And she's not very young let me tell you
Ten years since they shipped her from school
And don't think she'll ever get married;
She can't find big enough fool. ,r...l
Her name! Miss Van Arsdel, of Brooklyn.
You met her. you say, in July?
You're engaged to Ter, Tom? Oh, the dickens!
Beg par, I-weI, hang it-good-by!
---Actd CoIWnD6i0f,0..
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
Her First Pudding.

4 A newly-married lady made her first
plum pudding the other day. g I aimed
to make good pudding" she said to
her husband, who is rifeman, when
the dish was served. You aimed
WE'LL" he replied, as he inhaled it's
fragrance. Yes she said, ] made a
plum scenter."
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
Didn't Know Who to Apologize to.

David Crockett once visited menage-
RE at Washington, and, pausing
moment before particularly hideous
monkey, exclaimed: What resem-
blance to the Hon. Mr.. XII" The words
were scarcely spoken when he turned
and, to his great astonishment. saw
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
Ice for Dinhtheria.

0. E. Miles, Of Cedar Rapids, Iowa,
says he cured his wife of diphtheria,
after kerosene and sulphur had been
tried ia vain, by the use of ice, having
her hold pieces in her throat, where the
white fungus was formed, and applying
it in cloths on the outside. The appi-
cations were renewed as fast as they
disappeared, and soon the patient was
ont of danger. Mr.. Miles theory is
that the low temperature caused by the
ice kills the deadly fungus.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13
GAZETTED.

me types setter stands before his case.
Inc gas burns low, and the night is deep,
anu M over the staggering chimney stacks
darkness and shadows creep,
And the city is lost in sleep.
The type-setter stands there. gaunt and gray
With dim old;eyes and weary brain.
ana ne sings cadence, solemn and low
10 the beat of the bitter rain
I'm rattling easement and pane.
lremble the rafters, 1oof and floor
AS ne fingers the type lin his desolate yay,:
ana ne hears the music family borne
From the theater over the way
AT some strange old tragedy play
The old man sings, and tremble the floors
with the believing engine down below.
AND the crash of the whirling axle bars
ana the thunders that from them grow.
Echoing to and fro
Lower and lower the gas-lights burn
ana grow the shadows dusky and gray:
ana the storm is hushed and the music's swell
AT the theater over the way
And finished the tragedy play.
And the type-setter wipes his dim old ewes.
Inc types no more with his fingers move:
And he smiles, that while setting the name below
The angels, in tender love-
Were setting it up above.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13

THE Lewiston (Me.) Journal says
that the cotton manufacturers of that
city have very hopeful feeling in re-
gard to the business prospects of the
present year.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13

A GREENBAcK party has been organ
lied in Canada. It wants the Dominion
Government to have legal tenders.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-03-13

due me. The fret Is, that 1t has been
through your tenancy of my house, and
through accident or negligence on the
part of some one for whom you are re-
sponsible, that my ruin has been brought
about" t
Il don't understand you" n FL.
Listen, sir" he went on, @and you
will. was brought up to the sea and
followed it till mid-ife, for I was entire
~ dependent on my own earnings. MY
only relative at this time was an old uncle,
also a sailor, and a most eccentric man.
as you will presently see. Fifteen years
ago he suddenly came into large sum
Of money; never knew how, but he re-
tired and took that house. He had only
been in it three years when a mortal
sickness overlook him; he sent for me.
'"'Tom,' said he,' am dying, and I
don't like it; I am terrified, not SO much
at the thought Of death as at the thought
of burial; a sailors grave I would not
mind, but to be boxed up and thrust in
to the earth, no, Tom, won't stand it.
look to you to see that-it doesn't hap
pen; and I have taken measures TO make
sure that you do see that it doesn't hap
pen. I've made my will, Tom; I've left
you all I possess, but on one condition,
and it is that you are my heir so long
as I am well above ground, and no
longer-mark the words, Well above
ground" Directly I am buried, or nv
remains are allowed to mingle with
mother-earth, as she is called-she was
no mother to me; the sea was my moth
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04

be used. Perhaps the Esquimaux rep
resent the heaviest feeders in the
world, for Parry tells of a young
native who devoured in the twenty
four hours nine and half pounds of
sea horse, half raw, half cooked; one and
three-fourths pounds of bread; one and
one-fourth pints of good, strong soup !;
one and three-fourth pounds Of ship
bread; and nine pints of water, not
counting grog and spirits. Both Sir
John Ross and DIR. Hayes, from per-
sonal observations, declare that the
daily ration Of an Esquimaux may
range from twelve to twenty pounds OF
flesh food. On the other hand, it is
quite remarkable how small quantity
of food man may eat, and still retain
his health, though, as to the point of
mental vigor engendered by scanty fare,
that is another question. Cornaro, who
wrote treatise on long life, subsisted
for fifty eight years on twelve
ounces of vegetable matter and fourteen
ounces of wine per diem, while another
case is cited of man existing for not
quite twenty years on sixteen ounces OF
-four per diem, made i.4to some kind Of
pudding .-EGcha7ege.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
How Much Can a Man Eat!

The question asked by a correspond
emit as to the quantity of food necessary
to support life is, we suppose, rather in
tended as an inquiry as to the quantity
needed by an adult person in the Or
binary vocations of life. An American
soldier has daily given him % ounces of
bread, II ounces of pork or bacon, or 20
ounces of fresh or salt beef, 16 ounces Of
potatoes three times week, 1.6 ounces
of rice, with 16 ounces of coffee, 204
ounces Of sugar, 0.64 of gill of beans,
0.32 of q gill OF vinegar, Ole Of a gill
of salt AS to the quantity of this
food, it is larger and more abund-
ant than would seem at first
sight to be necessary, but the liberality
in food has this great advantage, that, in
time of hard work, the fatigue of the
individual is diminished and the power
of recuperation sensibly increased. The
total quantity, then, provided for sol
der Of the United States army is larger
than is consumed by the general work
ing man. Of course, various conditions
of life, climate and locality have to do
with the quantity of food. Thus, an
idle person can get along very we'll with
two and three-quarter ounces of nj.
trogenous food and twenty ounces OF
carbonaceous food (desh and cereal OF
vegetable food, when, if the same indi.
vidual were walking or in active out
door life, double this quantity might
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
The Best Rubber Boot.

There is nothing better for a farmer or out
door man than good rubber boot, and moth
ing so exasperating as bad ole. Competition
among manufacturers has led to such cheap
ening of quality that until lately it was hard
thing to find a rubber boot really worth the
money asked for it. The Candee Rubber Co.,
of New Haven, Ct, however, has lately put on
the markets boot designed to meet the call for
real good, substantial article, and to denote it's
freedom from adulterative mixtures it is called
the 95 Per Cent. Sterling Boot" 1t is made,
on honor, as pure as can be made, and is war
ranted three months. BY an ingenious con-
trivance space is provided at the top of the
leg for recording the date of the sale, by punch
ing holes in the spaces provided railroad
ticket-so that there may be no trouble about
the warrant The upper and leg of the "951
Boots are doubled, and the soles are one-halt
inch thick, of solid rubber from toe to heel
Ordinary rubber boots are barely a quarter
inch thick IN the thickest part, and emily one
eighth at the shank. A descriptive circular can
be obtained by sending postal direct to the
company; or the "95 Boots can be found al
most of the stores
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
Perfect Flowers.

It ii q somewhat difficult thing to say Just
what a perfect flower is. Some people think
the single flowers are perfect, while another
class insist that flower must needs be double
to be perfect. Years ago IN England and Scot
land it was customary to Judge flowers by
points, and to be perfect the Tulip, for instance
was to be shaped like half cup, with smooth
edges and other minor points. The PanSy to
be perfect had TO conform to certain rules, of
which one Of the standards Of excellence was
that it be round, of good size and form. We
like to see the well formed, large-sized flowers
and, as it is just as easy to grow them as the
Misunderstanding things we see in some gar
dens, will tell you how to manage. Of course
the most important thing TO see to- is to have
pure, fresh seeds selected from flowers Of good
size and form. If one has the time to grow
their own seeds, and select only the very best
TO SOW, they will soon be possessed of strain
Of flowers combining many good qualities in
one To me the gathering and saving of seeds
of all kinds is q hobby
A neighbor said to me one day, How large
your Pansies are; and mine are little mites of
things" | asked her where she got her Seed
and was told, "Out of the box down at the drug
store" There is the whole thing in nutshell
These commissioned seeds are in most cases
old, inferior stock, which probably has peram-
bulatod the country, year after year; for all I'M
sold seeds are returned to the "house" and re-
shipped by them in the spring. There is no
need of buying poor, old, worthless seeds,
when Uncle SANS mails will bring the most
reliable seedsmen right to your door, Don't
always ascribe your failure to poor seed, how
ever, for insects, dry weather, too deep plant
ing are only few of the reasons why seeds fail
to grow. Get good seeds OF some one you can
rely upon, and then you can raise as perfect
flowers as your neighbor Mr.. RENNIE
A1NswoRTH, Washington Co.. Iowa.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
A Remarkable Bank Note.

Not long ago a well-known collector OF
curiosities in Paris, who had devoted
considerable sums of money to the
gathering together of bank notes Of all
countries and all values, became the
possessor of Bank of England 5
pound note to which an unusually
strange story was attached. This note
was paid into a Liverpool merchants
office in the ordinary way Of business
sixty-one years ago, and the cashier,
while holding it up to the light to test
it's genuineness, noticed some faint red
marks which, on closer examination,
proved to be semi effaced words scrawled
in blood between the printed lines and
upon the blank margin of the note.
Eventually the following sentence was
made out:
eff this note should fall into the
hands of John Dean, of Long-hill, near
Carlisle, he will learn hereby that his
brother is languishing prisoner in
Algiers"
Mr.. Dean vas promptly communicate
ed with by the holder of the note, and
he appealed to the Government of the
day for assistance in his endeavor to
obtain his brothers release. The pris-
oner, who, as it subsequently appeared,
had traced the above sentence upon the
note with splinter of wood dipped in
his blood, had been a slave to the Dey
of Algiers for eleven years, when his
strange missive first attracted attention
in a Liverpool counting-house. HIS
family and friends had long believed
him dead. Eventually his brother,
with the aid of the British authorities
in the Mediterranean, succeeded in
ransoming him from the Dey, and
brought him home to England, where,
however, he did not long survive his
release, his constitution having been ir
reparably injured by exposure, priva
tions, and forced labor in the Dey's gal
1pvS
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
An Intelligent Young Man.

A young man gets Oh the train and
seats himself opposite me. He wears
ame-colored kids, and poodle-dog
Now I do not object TO a man wearing
any kind or color of kids, but, love OF
the angels, how do hate poodle-dog.
The young man holds the poodle in his
lap, smoothes out the blue ribbon around
it's neck, placidly strokes his own
whiskers, and languidly stares at me-
AS [ look at them [ notice how much
they look alike. Father and son, per
haps. AS think the thought, the dog
snarls and barks an indignant denial
BHrdette, IN Burlington Ha10k Eye.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
There Is Health Ahead

For cheerless dyspephcs who will use Hostel
ter's Stomach Bitters, which will enable them
to digest, restore their appetites, steady their
nerves, and drive away the blues If with
such prospect there are any of them who
neglectto profit by the above suggestion, why,
they deserve to suffer, that is all Let them
ask any one who has used the Bitters if it is a
good medicine, and if they receive truthful
reply it will be an affirmative. Biliousness,
bowel troubles, debility, rheumatism are ali
conquered by this highly esteemed and pro-
fessionally sanctioned specific, which has also
won national reputation as remedy for, and
means of avertlng, intermittent and remit
tent fevers 1t has cheering effect upon the
Respondent invalid, and may be relied upon to
produce decisive, and not palliative effects. 1t
is the one thing needful for the cure of dys
pepsia and nothing will supply its place
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1879-12-04
Humbugged Again.

saw SO much said about the merits
of Hop Bitters, and my wife, who was
always doctoring, and never we'll, leased
ne so urgently to get her some, CON
cluded to be humbugged again and I am
glad did, for in less than two months
use Of the Bitters my wife was cured, and
she has remained so for eighteen months
since. I like such humbugging.-H. T.,
st. Paul.-Pio4aeer-PresS.
IT has wonderful power On bowels,
liver and kidneys! What? Kidney
Wort. Try it.