St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1879-05-02
Squibs.

The combing man-The hairdresser.
The light of other days-Sunset Cox.
Howell Courier.
A mosquito bar affords good protec-
ton from mosquitoes, but a crOwbar
don't protect corn field worth a cent.
The Cinnamon appear to have caught
the pedestrian fever. Wah-Kee has
his sign out on Washington street.
The mau who believes he can move
the world should begin by Wheeling,
| Virginia.-[ Detroit Free Press.
Willie asked his mother where the
stars came from. Her reply was "My
son, l do not know" "Well, do,n he
said ''the moon laid 'em."
They tried to kill book agent at
Omaha last week. He was robbed,
thrown into the river, knocked off the
cars, tossed from high bridge into the
river again, and in two hours he was
around with an illustrated Bible, irving
to get subscription from the head of
the attacking party.
Physician (who has just examined an
lrishman's lungs)-There seems to be
some trouble here-pneumonia, or some
thing OF that sort have you ever ex-
perforated blood Irishman-About
eight years ago. Physician-Did you
feel sick Irishman-Och, l did that !
Physician What was the matter?
lrishman-I had a tooth pulled.
''Twenty years ago." said colored
philosopher, "niggers was wuf thou
sand dollars apiece. Now dey would
be deah at two dollars a dozen. It's
'stonishin' how de race am running
down.
A father said to an old acquaintance
who came to cOndole with him on thz,
unmanageableness of his two sons, who
had committed burglary in the next
town, and had been sentenced to pris-
on: ''It is pretty rough on me to have
them both go to Onct, but there is one
thing to it-when it comes night now,
| know where them boys be-"
Some children take naturally to a
practical view of things. A little girl
IN BroOkline was saying her prayers
the other evening, closing up with,
''God bless papa and mamma, little
sister and everybody, and keep us from
harm this night, amen" The ''little
sister" Il blight-eyed puss of five years,
quietly remarked, "If you'd said severy-
body to begin with you needn't have
made such a long prayer."-[ Boston
Transcript Causerie.
Sir Edwin Landseer used to tell a
story of Il dog of his acquaintance
who once restored to friend of Sir
Edwin valuable spaniel two weeks
after the time agreed upon when the
matter was negotiated. Sir Edwin up
braiding the man for his delay, the lat
ter finally said: "Well, the truth is,
Sir Edwin, you see had to steal him
back tlom an old lady to whom sold
him for twenty guineas. She never
higgled about the price, and she was
so fond of the dog l didn't think it
would be Christian not to let her have
a few days pleasure of him.
A man was at confession one day.
and while he was cenfessing he spied
ln the pocket of the monks habit a
silver snuff-box, and stole it. "Father, y
ne said Immediately, 81 accuse myself
OF having stolen a silver snuff-box. u
Then, my son, you must certainly, re-
store it," "Will you have it yourself,
my father 2" az Certainly not. INV
son" 'The fact is," proceeded the
penitent, "that have offered it to the
owner and he has refused it.n 0Then
you can keep it with a good con-
science" answered the father.-[Ex-
change.