New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1879-09-03
Beating . Carpet.

when the good housewives instinct for
raising the dust 10 active; and no
woman who is mistress Of . house Is
happy unless she has her head done up
in 2 sweeping cap. and Yields broom
in her hand. 5.t
Everywhere, indoors, the atmosphere
teens with dust, and the wo0dpiles,
and fences, and dwarf trees, End clothes
lines are hung with carpets.
Carpets Of al patterns, aad In every
stage Of dilapidation!
Carpets old, and new. and darned,
and patched, and stained, and general
" demoralized!
Carpets Of living rooms, where every
thread 10 worn 20 thin that it IL won
der and mercy that tho fabric will
hold together while it is put on the
line; and carpets OF spare rooms and
parlors where the blinds have been al
ways kept shut, and the gorgeous roses
and lilies bloom In all their brilliant
magnificence still.
The woman Of the house seems rather
to enjoy the terrible confusion which
tearing up carpets creates; but not 90
the man Of the house. No, indeed!
He knows he shall be called upon to
beat those carpets; and about that time
he will wish that he had never been
fool enough to get married. He will
look at old bachelor Jones over the
way, reading his magazine, and smok-
ing serenely. while his fat landlady
beats the carpet Of his room. and blows
like grampus In the effort; and our
Benedict will envy that lonesome old
bachelor his sweet serenity Of spirit.
But pair of blue eyes made q fool
Of him, and now the owner Of the blue
eyes, with her dress turned up, and her
hair covered with an old red handker-
chief, and her elbows grimy with the
dust she has been raising, has the right
to call on him to beat the carpet, and
It he refuses, then he does not fulfil tha
marriage covenant according to the
theory Of all the women he knows Of.
He goes at it like sheep to the
slaughter. He does not want to do it..
Awfully does not want to. He hates
the dust in his nose and eyes. and the
lint in his mouth, and on his clothes,
and the pounding makes his arms ache,
and the carpet has trick Of coming
off the line, or else the line breaks Just
as he gets . good chance at 1t.
And all the women in the neighbor
ing houses, as he knows, will be look
ing out to see how he does it, and they
will laugh at every accident he has,
and enjoy it hugely every time he gets
his stick hung up in the line. and has
to swear to get It out.
And while he is firing away, Brown
will pass by with his cane under his
arm, and his hat well set back, and he
will hail him, and want to know how
he likes It, and inform him that he had
better 'pull down his vest" and then
he will saunter on languidly, and ex-
press his opinion that q man il foolish
to beat carpetwhen he can hire q fell
low to do it for q dollar.
The blue-eyed wife will Just here put
her head out Of the window. and call
sharply:
.'John. don't for Heavens sake
pound that thin place all to pieces!
Strange that . man don't know any
thingp' ..
And then she'll come down into the
yard, and show him Just how It ought
to be done. And if anything will make
q married man mad clear through, it
is to have his wife show him how TO do
what he has done thousand times
before, satisfactory to himself If to no
one else.
But our advice to you, good married
men friends, is to take the carpet-beat-
ing as one of the ills Of life. Do it
cheerfully, bear it brevely and resign
eddy. and don't let your feelings be
much hurt il your wife tells you, after
you have done your best, that she
wishes to goodness she had beat that
carpet herself! SIZE could have done it
twice as Welt -Kate Thorn. IN N. 7.