The Florida agriculturist. [volume] (DeLand, Fla.) 1878-1911, 1879-07-09
july 8
VARIETIES.
Not amiss-a pretty widow.


the dealer named the price, 81 don't
want whole Florida strawberry l
only want small slice off the round.
A full-blown rose "besprinkled"
with the purest dew is not SO beauti-
full as child blushing beneath Its pa
rents displeasure, and shedding tears
of sorrow for it's faults.
"Shall 1 help you to alight?" asked
/ young gentleman, addressing
bouncing country girl who was pre-.
pairing to leave railway carnage
"Thank you sir" sweetly replied the
girl, "but don't smoke"
The Albany Journal gets off this
one: James," said the veteran par
Humanitarian, as they sat quietly fish
ing, sit wouldn't do to move the pre-
vious question up here" "Why not
here as we'll as elsewhere ?" inquired
James. Because" replied the vet
eran, as he proceeds to render his
hook tempting to the fish, because
if the motion should prevail, it would
cut off all de DAFT"
This story is being passed around
at West Springfield, and is a good
one. whether true or not. A citizen
went home from the caucus one night
and ask,his wife Odd you commit
an error ordo anything out OF charac-
te, before we were married?" "Why.
no What makes you ask such a
question ?" "Oh, didn't think you
had, but was nominated for town
Office tonight, and | knew if you had
it would all be out to-morrow.-E%.
Mrs. d. writes: ri was told by
friend that the phrases escaped with
the skin OF my teeth 'at their wits
end Sat as grease, picking and steal
ing, might all be found in the Bible.
If so, can you tell where? ?" They all
occur in the Bible, excepting the last,
which you will find in the catechism
of the Book of Common Prayer"
Of the others, the first is Job xix. 20;
the second, Ps. evil. 81 and the
third, Ps. cxix. 70-Potter's Monthly.
A rural bride of considerable beauty
went to Indianapolis on the honey
moon tour. Her husband was mani
testify proud of her good looks.
While they were going about the
city she was struck in the face by
falling sign-board and her nose
broken. The attending surgeon said
that she was badly disigured for lite.
"Just my darned LUCK" the husband
exclaimed property always goes to
ruin in my hands.
"You know" said Rice, chow the
negro likes possum" Two darkies
were riding from field after hard
days blowing. They began to talk
about the good things to eat. "What
do you say to dis?" said one "T-ak-e
good fat 'possum-pah-pile him
put him in ole-fashion Ouch owing
roas' him brown'-the other darkey's
eyes rolling and mouth watering as
the description went on-"save him
up wild coon grady" "Shut your
mouf, you niggar; I'll fall right oft'n
dis boss. "-Bostoe Globe.
Two newsboys were standing in
front of Houston cigar store when
one of them asked the other, "Have
you got 3 cents ?" eyes" "W ell,
I've got 2 cents; give me your
cents and I'll buy scent Havana
cigar" GAIL right" says No. 2, hand
ing out the money. He enters the
cigar store, procures the cigar Con
credit, possibly, lights it, and puffs it
with a great deal of satisfaction.
"Come, now, give us a puff" says
No. 2; Il furnished more than halt
the money" 81 know it," said the
smoker, "but then I'm president and
you are only stockholder you can
spit"
Your quiet women are the women
of power. The noisy, clustering, ar
rogant, self-asserting among them
make the air hot with their voices
and trouble. the world with their sup
erabundant activities, but this cannot
be called real strength-it is more
generally sham and a show which
breaks down under the pressure of
personal and private trial; while the
true power Of those who, as wives,
influence the present, and, as mothers,
mould the future lives, hidden from
the public, all the more valuable be.
cause of it's reserve. The perfume o.
the violet steals out from the dense
thicket where it lies hidden, while
IL nrnAn,unr firms the glare of it's