Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1879-09-04
THE AMERICAN SOCIETY
NOVEL.
The Story i'm Ten Brief. Chapfers
and Moral.
From the New York Graphic.

IEOh luS ANCN lOlh
PREFACE.
This is the bare, bald and hideOus
skeleton of one-half the present Ameri-
can society novels.
CHAPTER 1.-THE HEROINE.
She was pretty and well educated,
graceful in manner, polite and pleasing.
By her beauty she captiyated many
young men. Her parents were in but
moderate circumstances. That is all.
CHAPTER 1.-THE HERO.
He was rich. lie kept this a secret
from her. She guessed it, however. He
was of the ''blue blood of the United
States. His noble ancestors couldn't
make good living in Europe, SO they
came to America. Their noble house
was founded in a small grocery store.
The founder of the family traded in rum,
tobacco, sugar and niggers.
Augustus wanted to get pretty wife
who would marry him for himself alone.
He got awfully fooled. But he never
found this ont until some years after
their marriage, and this discovery has
nothing to do with our romance.
CHAPTER III.-THE STUFFING.
They met. Mainly pamby. Mandy
pamby. Sqush, gush, style. Mandy
pamby, namby pamby, gush, mush, sqush:
Mandy pamby, mush, gush, sqush.
CHAPTER ".
She threw the other fellow overheard.
AT first the poor parents did not like the
disguised rich Suitor, because they
thought he might be poor poet, painter
or writer. She knew better, and told
the old folks to mind their business.
That night he Slipped on her beautiful
neck string of pearls worth $4,000. 81
am a poor man., said he, remember
that"
CHAPTER V.-MORE STUFFING.
Mandy pamby. Mandy pamby Nam
by pamby.
CHAPTER VI.-THEIR SENTIMENT.
"YOu know more of the world than /,
Augustus" said she, tell me, are there
many people in the world?"
Not many" said he.
"Where do all the people in the world
live?" she asked confidingly.
"In winIer on Fifth avenue; in sum
mer at Newport, Long Branch, Saratoga,
and few in Europe" said he.
"And are those ALP" said she.
AL" said he, softly.
Tell me-" said she, in her silvery
tones, show much must one be worth to
he a gentleman OF lady?"
AT present not less than $1,000,000
In old times one might go in society for
S5OO,O0O, but prices rule higher now. In
fact, mere one millionaireS are but just
tolerated in good society,"" said he.
He slipped ON her finger a $1,000 dia-
mOnd ring. Remember, am but poor
man." said he.
81 care not" said she. "YOu are good
and noble, and those are qualities better
than wealth."
CHAPTER vI.-STUFFING.
Namby pamby. Mandy pamby. Nam
by pamby.
CHAPTER YIII-THE EXCITING CHAPTER.
They were married. He gave the vii
lage minister 5000 wedding fee.
I'VE go nOw," said he, "to meet my
poor old mother and sisters Our home
is humble, but clean. Twas scrubbed
yesterday for the first time in years."
The pair came to New York. An ele-
CANT carriage received them at the de-
pot. They drove up to brown stone
front on Fifth avenue.
1t was all as she had expected.
Dearest Augustus" said she, show
could you deceive me thus 2"
The rest. More gold watches. Six
Saratoga trunks full of dresses. Five
entirely new switches. Family dia-
mOnds. Butler, at the door. French
maid Another French maid. Solid
crystal chamber sets. FreScoed and gill
del parlors. An ivory clock worth 81
900. Naughty blue blOoded mOther-in-
law gives her another gold watch and
chain.
CHAPTER IX.-CONCLUSION.
Mandy pamby. Namby pamby. Nam
by pamby.
CHAPTER N.-MORAL,
To all poor but amiable girls:
Go thou and do likewise.