Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1879-03-21
Wise and Otheruise.
SOME OF THR NEW YORK SUNDAY HERALD's
CHAT by THE WAY"

SOME oF THR NEW YORK SUNDAY HERALD s
CHAT by THE WAY"
It is better to have even q cur fawn on you
! than snap at you.
The richest man in the world is he who is
contented to be just what he is.
If the scandal about you is true, your bet
ter way is to talk yourself nearly to death to
convince men that it is false If it is false
you can afford to keep still and allow it to die
of its own poison.
III temper and smoke are about equal in
their ability to drive a man out Of the house.
! A gossip ought not to rank as the equal of
a sagacious clam for the clam knows to a
nicely when to shut up, but the gossip does
not
Men are like an old-fashioned country wag-
on. When it is loaded everything seems to
work well and smoothly, but when it has
nothing in it, it rattles with a noise that can
be heard for miles
1t may be slightly Hbernian, but it is new
ertheless true, that the best way to look at
| the faults of your friends is to shut your eyes
To very few of us will these verses apply,
if each one judges for himself but to many
more will they apply, if others judge for s.
Said vain Andrew Scalp, my initials guess,
Are known, so sign all my poems A. 8.
Said Jerrod, own you're 3 reticent youth,
4
Some people are willing to be good if they
are well paid for it, and others are good for
nothing.
1t was a representative of the fierce activi-
/ ty of our American mercantile life, with its
grinding and merciless competitions. who, on
| being asked what he had accomplished by
twenty years work, replied, Il have succeed
ed in accumulating just about 81 600, 900 and
in having two strokes of paralysis"
Our Baptist friends must not be too boast
| full of the size of their denomination. When
| they are sifted down to the last analysis it
will be found that they are only Congrega-
tionalists with close communion attachment
When you say you can see the villain in
mans face you ought TO look a second time
to be sure that you do not see it by reflection.
1t does little good to boast of your ability.
If you have any, the less You say about it the
better. Solid worth always speaks for itself
''If that man had been under my treatment, I"
said physician who worshipped himself and
didn't believe in any other god, or know of
any, 'he would have been out of doors in
twenty four hours, instead of lingering for
| six weeks" Yes" was the reioinder 'out
of doors and on the way to the cemetery"
There is little use in wasting ones time in
hunting for the philosophers stone. The
only real article of that kind which we ever
read of was the one used by David during the
unpleasantness between himself and Goliath.
Any stone is philosophers stone if philos-
| opher picks it up and uses it. Now, David
reasoned that the stone represented an idea,
and that if he could get the idea to enter the
head of Goliath any little misunderstanding
| that had previously existed would be settled
at once. He put it into his sling and sent it,
with his compliments. Goliath at once felt
the force of the idea, and ever afterward kept
| quiet about the subject. Moral Any stone
| you see is a philosophers stone if you have a
strong arm to sling it and good eye to aim.
Some peoples ideas of religion are about as
sensible as those of the woman who gave to a
poor soldier who had lost both legs a tract on
the sin of dancing.
1t is no harder to make the wrong right by
arguing about it or excusing it than it is to
| jump across a hole in two jumps.
What was her exact intellectual condition it
would puzzle professor of metaphysics to
discover When asked to boil the eggs Just
three minutes by the clock she declared that
it was impossible, because the clock was full
quarter of an hour too fast.
Herbert Spencer when engaged in the So
luton of a metaphysical problem that claim
ed the whole of his vast mind, never looked
more speculatvely absorbed or more deter
mined to produce results than deluded hen
whom we saw last week persistently setting
on half dozen glass door knobs. She gave
us the impression, as we watched the varying
expressions of her countenance, that she had
reluctantly arrived at the conclusion that
protoplasm was practically dead failure.
Sympathy always indicates a certain refine
ment of nature, but it is sometimes curiously
misplaced. The Siamese twins were on ex-
hibition, and among the spectators was an
lrishman who had an original way of looking
at things. He told a friend who was stand
ing at his side that the most fortunate thing
in the world was that they were brothers, be-
cause if they had been strangers to each 9TH
er they would never have been able to get on
together.
There is only one better. thing than to ap-
pear to be virtuous and happy, and that is to
be really SO.
There is very little use in making to-day
cloudy because tomorrow is likely TO be
stormy.
1t is said that the laws of nature are always
consistent with themselves. This can hard
ly be true, since many man who sowed wild
oats has been known TO reap hemp instead.
A bad boy becomes a bad man about as ea-
silly and almost as inevitably as a tadpole be-
comes frog.
Fortune very closely resembles a coy young
girl who is playing young man as he would
play trout. If she finds that you have the
pluck to be Indifferent she is apt to bestow
her smiles, but if she sees that she can break
your heart she will do it just for the pleasure
of mending it again.
Many man can bear a great grief who
finds it impossible TO endure a small one. He
can stand face to face with complete bank
ruptcy, and feel a certain broad-shouldered
satisfaction, but to put out the gas when re-
firing for the night and then stumble against
a chair or hit his bare foot against the corner
of the bed is an experience which not one
man in the thousand can bear with Christian
fortitude. If there are any bad words which
hid themselves in a corner of your soul when
you We're converted they are sure to be ready
for use at such a time as that. There are on
ly few expressions in the English language
which can do justice to the occasion.
When we think of the political institutions
and aims of Americans we are proud, but
when we think of our political tricksters we
feel like using the words of Horace Walpole
81 should love my country very much if it
were not for my countrymen."
Whenever you raise your hand to strike a
friend you should remember that, in Parlia-
mentary phrase, that motion is out of order