The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1879-01-02
STANDARD PARAGRAPHS.
A time lock: A tuft of gray hair.


A time lock: tuft of gray hair
The man who laughs: The man who
has overcoats for sale.
The Bank robbers motto: Always
keep on the safe side
"Gen. Boynton has again killed Blaine
off from the Presidential race. Poor
Blaine
The young lady who "drew herself up,
haughtily," had to be lowered witha der
rick. VA
John Sherman now skips gaily about.
whistling "Silver Threads Among the
Gold"
WANrED-ro KNOW: The whereabouts
of the politician who was last seen IN
the hands of his friends IL s.s,1
A st. Louis paper says:i 'Democracy
means destiny" That's justwhat poor
John O'Connor said. fHA
Gen. Garfield announces that he Is
Foster man. Good for you, General, we
knew there was one some where
Now the coal dealer rubs his hands
together innocently, and hopes we ain
goin' to have freezin' cold spellPh
Congressman Hewitt nowtswantssto in
vestigate the manner in which John
ASherman has ruined the country BY Re
sumption.
A lot of hungry Demd pts are going to
meet in Columbus on the sth, and "glo
rify the memory of Andrew Jackson" by
eating soup.
Old girls, have courage Miss Martha
Atlanta Lumpkin. of Georgia, after hav
ing carried that name around for fifty
years, was married few days ago.
An Ohio man lynched in Nebfaska
That's It'll Let the other States go to
killing off Ohio men. THERE'S no telling
What jealousy will do.
now in New York four feet deep 1t
peen feared. for long time. that
knSye Sammy Tilden might be showed
under.
There is word from Washington that
the President favors Garfield for Cover
nor of Ohio This is news Of the great
est Importance
The Cincinnati Gazette, after bowling
itself hoarse over tissue ballots, and
Southern outrages, now rejoices that the
effor. to investigate them viii fail.
An Illinois jeweler broke into his own
store, and stole his own goods. and now
they've arrested him for IT. He must
have been an Ohio man originally.
A SHORT CoURTsHIP.
He.took, her slender band in his.
= He stroked her sunny hairS---- -
just then "fond father toddled in
And hit him with chair.
\ The Democratic papefs are still lrejoic,
ing over the manner inWhich Thurman
crushed Blaine But the troubles, the
more the Democrats crush Blaine, the
.ess pleased they seem to be.
There was snow Christmas, Of this
year" said Smith to party of friends.
"Den,'' said Robson who was stand
ing near, II had all datarisk an ttubhle
to git dat turkey, fur nuthin. So der
was no Christmas after allr'
Pleasant weather! Beautiful weather.
As the pedestrian dives along the street,
he suddenly reaches up and feels his left
ear, tenderly, then he feels his right ear,
then the end of his nose, then rushes off
at break-neck speed in an attempt to
outrun the frost.
OF coursel just as we expected At
ter firing pistols, crackers and torpedoes,
yelling ones self hoarse, and eating tur-
key until one can scarcely breathe, along
come the newspapers and tell us that
there is no evidence that the Savior was
born on the 25th.
The country has much to be thankful
for Resumption is accomplished, there
are signs of business reviving, the base
ball League has arranged its campaign
for next summer, and 20 Leary's legs are
al! right" /
Washington picture dealers don't dis
play photographs of President Hayes in
their windows any more. Wherever one
was displayed, the cows congregated, and |
lowed coaxingly at it until it was re-
moved.