The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1879-04-23
Mr.. Kroeger's Hand-Organ.

AAtcl SIS gIlAuel AeaIe loItuISA Springs
Gentle Spring" to close, and had shout
dered his organ to go in quest of further
pecuniary triumphs, Mr.. Kroeger spoke
up, and said: "
"Did you ever hear of the hand organ I
got up, not many years ago?''
ssNever; let's hear about it." r..
''Well, it was a phonetic hand organ.
7 had heard celebrated violinists draw
such simple words as yes and, mamma
out of their instruments, and thought
| would try and get up something which
| would say ubiquitous, 'antthesis,' and
'almoner' and other respectable words
At first wasn'd very successful, but
persevered and success crowned nv ef-
forts. had the words set to music, and
all I lad to do was just to grind them
out. BY pushing in one stop and pulling
out another, the whole thing would be
changed. ! used to go around and play
Mark Twain's Jumping Frog to airs from
Lucia and one Of Evarts' long speeches
TO the tune OF Old Hundred. I also re-
produced the songs Of birds, and fire.
quently, when I was performing. an
oriole would fly down and try to mate
with the and-organ.
II gotup special hand organs, too. For
instance. had one loaded with Black
stone, and when young law students were
too lazy to read they would purchase an
organ and hire bootblack to grind it
out to them while they would lie back
in their chairs and smoke cigarettes.
They used to be enabled to hear nixon s
Digest sChitty on Contracts, and the
Revised Statutes, set to the tripping airs
of 'Pinafore' and Belle Helene.'"
"Wasn't your idea something in the
: phonograph ine2"
"Not at all--not at ALL" responded
Mr.. Kroeger, coloring up as though he
had been accused of apprepriating some
one else's thunder; ''the photograph re.
produces; nv organ produces sounds
over as long as it is properly creased.
: used to collect uncollectable bills too
: There was an old man named Clup, who
), borrowed IS from me once, and coulc
:, never make him shekel out to me; SO
got mad, wrote song about him anc
=, had it set to an alluring tune. The las
= verse went something like this:
n There is man named Andrew Clup
To creditors says, "No, sir"
He always fails to shekel up
His butcher and his grocer.
:, His ignorance ofdebts is gay;
u All! nothing could be wagner; ..
)" Now, Mr.. Clup, you'd better pay s.
it That ' you owe to Kroeger.
# 81 PLAYED this in all the fashionabl
IS thorougfares, and right in front of hi
IT house, one summer evening, when all th
windows were open, and his dwelhn
/. was full of company. was paid on til
spot. I believe could have taken up
id church collection with that organ, if
IS only had q chance" .
ne ibid you ever do anything else VIII
&c your musical machine9"
in 81 fancy did. When Bob Burdett
was here lecturing on the Rise and Fa
We of the Moustache,' I lind shorthandrt
is porter take the whole thing down for m
Then I had it put into an organ. Yes,
in had everything, including the lectures
* awe-inspirlng monotone. Then wei
round delivering it for $40 night ali
g. expenses. Everybody roared when
came out, patted the organ fondly on, til
back, and introduced it as the HaWkey
&c. humor1st. When Bob heard of it he WI
ed wild. He swore vengence, and ever
time he comes East am obliged tovis
de my uncle in Quebec.
II once got up talking piano; evel
time you'd strike key word would t
up IN your face. It was regular I'm
bridged musical dictionary. I taug
VS. every one in the house to play on it, al
In it made terrible noise. On Sunds
7as morning my mother would sit down b
q fore it and play such q tune as thi
ms Hey, there, folksl It's time to get u
ra. breakfast is getting cold" It used
!, y save her lungs. And then bashful love
me used to play things to each other th
DO they were too bashful to utter. / u.s.
to make uprights and all kinds of plane
and had dowery certificates from all t
lad leading artists and artistes Of the DID
eat It was a grand thing. I think I have
map Of it somewhere around the hous
I'll Just step up and look for i"
1ou Then he went up stairs and his audit
opened the window, jumped out and r
for his life. -.
A country Clergyman was good d
az" astonished one day BY the iollity Of
mourners at the .breakfastn Of q flnel
ase and was glavely told, in explanati
: Al