The weekly herald. [volume] (Cleveland, Tenn.) 1876-1888, 1879-10-16

his family.
The coiner OF pennies takes q common
cents view OF things, although he does
MINIS matters.
In starting a horse il is advisable to
turn a little to one side before pulling
straight ahead.
Fruit jars,' he said as he looked at a
sign, and then continued, yes it does
unless it is real ripe
1t is a sea.rious thing to sea O man
half.seas over. We brook no interior
ence from such people.
Come back; all will be forgiven, is a
personal understood by all savings bank
officials residing abroad.
The pearl, s~ignifying purity, is the
stone next in favor after a diamond to be
used in an engagement ring.
Magnificent houses, costing anywhere
from $50, 900 to 5000, 900, and surround
ed by beautiful parks, are called cottages,
at Newport.
When John Monigrip's wife asks for
a dollar or two for current demands he
smiles sweetly and says, True love.
darling, seeks no change"
We have seen buckets, tubs, barrels
and bathing tubs made of paper, but
what the dickens does q newspaper Office
want Of files of their paperp
It's rough to get a judgment against
an editor and then find that the only
thing the editor possesses, which are
seizable, are q pair of shears and q paste
pot.
rs it possible, miss, that you do not
know the names OF some of your best
friends9' Certainly +; 1 do not even
know what my own may be in a year
from now.'
whats the difference asked a teach.
er in arithmetic, between one yard and
two yardsp' "A fence was the reply
OF a member of the class. The teacher
was silent.
Mamma remarked Freddie TO his
mother, as he anne home from school
one day, L wish I was a postage stamp
why so, FreddieP' inquired his mother.
Because its first licking is sure to be its
last
1t is said lemons paid $500, 900 duty
into the United States treasury last
year. He who squeezes a lemon with
proper spirit and disposition is doing
something to extinguish the public
debt.
A subscriber to q southwestern news
paper died recently, leaving four years
subscription unpaid. The editor ap-
peared at the grave and deposited on
the cofiu a palm-leaf fan, q linen buster
and a thermometer.
A little three-year old boy ran TO his
mother the other day with a bunch of
corn silk crying, Me dot some hair for
papa's bald head There were several
ladies by, and the father didn't appreci.
ate the joke exactly.
Bridget Ito caller: will ye kape still
q mint while I look at ye p No,
missis haint to home. She told me if a
woman come with a wart on the end of a
red nose to say she want to home; and
there's no %mistaking that wart.
A belated husband, hunting in the
dark for a match with which to light the
gas, and audibly expressing his disap.
pointment, was rendered insane in an
instant by his wife suggesting in q
sleepy voice, that he had better light
n and look for them, and not go STUN
bling arodnd in the dark and breaking
things.
Matte Reno. who had been living O
life of shame in Memphis, undertook to
expiate her sins by ministering among
the lowly of that city when the fever
broke out, and did glorious service until
she sickened and died Of the terrible
disease. Her funeral was attended by
many who had been made acquainted
with and revered thenobility with which
she performed her voluntary mission of
mercy.
A well known carpet drummer gives
the following itemiZed account of his
summer operations: Miles, 8, 954; trunks,
A; shown goods, 116; sold, SO; been
asked the news, 5,061; told, 2,210; lied
about it, 2. 100; didn't know, SOL; been
asked to drink, 1861; drank, 1861;
changed politics, 46; daily expenses
allowed by house, So; actual average,
~; clean profit 81; cash on hand, 80 60;
been to church, ]. .
Corn is the name commonly given in
Scotland to oats before they are ground.
In English and other northern Ian
guages this word signifies grain in gen
eral, but hire observes that the term is
specially used to denote that species Of
grain which is most commonly used in
any particular region. Hencein Sweden
and Iceland the term denotes barley,
while in Scotland, for obvious reasons,
IL is appropriated to oats.
xUI,a uaa Nat naau nuiousR