New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1879-04-23
SENSE AND N0NsEN *
SlrT1No BULL is . well-red man.
MIss-EMPLoYED: A young lady 6

6lTT1No BULL is q wen-red man.
MIss-EMPLoYED: a young lady IS
work. 81
a BARBER's apprentice Is an UNDER
strapper. I
THOSE who smile best have the new-
est set Of teeth.
The boy who burst into tierce was
evidently after molasses. IN. Y. Neacs.
The waters often get angry and then
you see the waters pout. - Whitehall
Times. .s.$ . .
WHEN you have family jar you
can't always preserve the peace.
Boston Iraveler.
LOOK" shouted an inspired but
imperfectly posted exhorter, Eat Sodom
and TO-MOrrOw.''
Why is pawnbroker like q drunk
ardp Because he takes the pledge but
cannot always keep it.
WHATEVER objection may be opposed
to whipping, it is at least undeniabls
that it makes i boy smart.
Poor but Ligh strung" was what
the fox really said when he found he
couldn't get the tempting cluster Of
grapes.
WHEN Katharine's husband was ar
rested for correcting that lady with .
strap, he said it was q pity that man
should be arrested fo- Swapping his
skate.
THERE is not probably woman in
al this broad, sunny land Of ours who
doesn't think that the carving-fork was
made for the express purpose Of pull
Ing corks out Of bottles.
ADOLPHE to Araminta, on their way
to church: How I would were tho
prayer-book you clasp 80 lovingly. y
Reply: chow l would you were, for
then l could shut you up"
II is said that the laws Of Nature are
always consistent with themselye s.
This can hardly be true, since many .
man who sowed wild oats has been
known to reap hemp instead. = Chicago
Times.
A LADY engaged to be married, and
getting sick Of her bargain, applied to
. friend to help her 70 unite the knot
before it was to late. ooh, certainly"
she replied; 8 it is very easy to unite it
now while it is only . beau knot
THEY ut BY tho ingle together,
Ia silence TAR sweeter than sound
In the silence known only to loyeu-
Unbroken. until with bound,
she springs from his side, calculating,
!" Laws a-mercy! there's coal of fire
popped on to our new carpetr'- Louis
ollie Courier Jotlrnal.
BAsHFUL LOVER Ito his sweetheart)
- Ahem, miss, l want to see your
father. I've m important matter tc
propose to him." Young lady icon.
sic sratcly)-"rm sorry papa is not
at home, but couldn't you propose to
me just as well9" He did, and with
A GENTLEMAN who is no longer
young, and who never was handsome,
says to child. in the. presence Of its
parents: "Well, my child, what do
You think of me, eh3'' The little one
makes no reply, and the gentleman
continues: sWell, so you won't tell
me what you think of me. Why won't
your "Cause don't want to get
licked
The question whether clergyman
can perform his own marriage cere-
mony has been in litigation for the last
three years, in the courts of Ireland,
and the decision finally reached is that
such q marriage is valid. 1t would be
80, of course, under the rule of COM
mon law, which reg ards marriage SIM
ply as q civil contract, and requires
no formal ceremony for its celebra-
ton.
Prof. Felix Adler, in recent lect-
ure in Cincinnati on the past and fu-
ture of Jews, said: Eve intend to
build up new chosen people, chosen
community Of all who feel and think
with us, in which there shall be no dis
tinction of faith or creed. Every city
which receives us, in which we raise our
banner, shall be to us new Jerusalem.
And the whole world we will clai-a at
last as our promised land, and make it
overflow as did the promised land Of
old with milk and honey, with the
milk of human kindness and the sweet
honey of human love. Lot Judaism
live; let Christianity, parged of its
superstitions, live; let Christian and
Jew work in the impulse Of their
special Beliefs