The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1879-10-09
Narietu.
JUST FOR FUN.

Does standing joke ever require a seat
The clam Is Rhode Islands national bird.
A taking paper-the sheriff's warrant.
judges position is trying one.-Bo8ton Post.
The fly is never positive. He always specs SO.
No boy is afraid Of yellow jacket when 1t has
girl In 1t,
How strange 1t is that hot words should produce
GOODNESS.
Political advice-If at first you don't succeed
lie, lie, again.
pen may be driven, but the pencil does best
when 1t is lead.
Dog d 'ys will soon be over, then we may expect
the cat'll show.
Persons who eat cucumbers do not have their
labor for their pains, but the reverse.
No Chicago paper is complete that does not con.
tain an interview with an Indian chief
Before Jones and his wife were married they
were only two now they are ten-1 and 0.
Mankind worship success, but think too little OF
the means by which it is attained.
When mans tenn per gets the best of him 1t re-
Veals the worst Of him. YonkeTs Gazette.
Ben Buffers only hope Of becoming Governor
is to marry gOVerness.- Philadelphia Herald.
Can anybody tell why it is that when a man
borrows your lead pencil he Immediately rams 1t
in his MOUTH
Many man who has not cent In his pocket
owns corn which he would not allow you to step
on for the world.
OF all the various methods proposed for the re.
duction Of the postage none are more practical
than this: Get married.
Before man marries woman he delights to
address her; after marriage be does not delight to
dress her so much.
Mary had little lamb with which she used TO
tussel; she yanked the wool all off Its back and
crammed 1t in her hustle,
Milton was asked If he intended to instruct his
daughter in the different anguapes, to which he
replied, mo sir, one tongue is sufficient for wo.
man."
mules head does not Contain brain capable
OF culture and refined rearing but It IS wonder.
full to what extent the other end of his form Is
reared
he is not particular about tjust at this time as he
has got acquainted with the young ladies across
the way
There's new counterfeit fifty, dollar greenback
out. We've spent our spare time for the past
week in looking over our wealth, but all our if
ties are good-ways off
A msn-so to speak-who is not able to bow 10
his own conscience every morning is hardly in
col dition to respectfully salute the world at any
other time Of the day -[JerrOld.
AS it has been finely expressed, principle is
passion for truth" And as an earlier and home.
lier writer hath it, "The truths we believein are
the pillars of our world"
"James, did you divide your paper of chocolate
with your brOther2' Eyes, certainly, mamma
ate the chocolate, and gave him the motto-he is
so fond Of reading you know"
Massachusetts, lady is reported to have scold.
ed her little boy for taking a drink of water at
hotel. For" said she, I'VE pay dollar for our
dinner, and water is very filing"
Ifthere be one thing which is truly admirable,
1t is to see Gods wisdom blessing an inferiority Of
natural powers, where they have been honestly,
truly and zealously cultivated.
A young man has been courting one girl FIVE
years, and every time he has called during the
past six months she has fed him on pop corn. But
he doesn't take the hint-and pop.
As they who, for every slight sickness take phys.
ic to repair their health, do rather impair 1t, so
they who for every triae are eager 10 vindicate
their character, do rather weaken it.
"Oh, mamma, that's Captain Jones's knock /
know he has come to ask me to be his wife Y
well, my dear you must acce pit him" "But
thought you hated him sol" Hate him do
so much, that mean to be his mother in.lawp
There is village In New Ham pshire which has
produced twenty six editors 1t was in alusion
to this circumstance that pious deacon remark
ed; Yes, there are twentysix Of 'em, but as they
have all left the town, reckon the Lord won
lay 1t up agin u.s."
The Government wants SSS, ,4SO from Babbit, the
soap man, who is accused Of putting more "lye"
into his statement tn the authorities than into his
soap.-Lo,Uen Courier. he will make a clean
bosom Of It, however, at once. It's soap deferred
that maketh the heart sick,
Johnny, are you never going to show any good
breeding at allP Sit up straight at the table,
ooh, mamma, Tommy Wilson's banty hen has
got nine little ones he says that's bully breed.
I'M" .HH
Certainly mans wicked angel IA in money.
often catch myself with something bold as lion
bouncing from my heart when the shilling fat
ties, and the lion, as small as any weasel, sinks
back again.