The Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1877-1885, 1879-08-16
ALL SORTS.

Every man has his prejudice and every
woman her bias.-Boston Transcript,
A little boy up town calls the cinders
from the chimney the shavings off of the
smoke, -Steubenuille Herald.
The wicked Democrats of Maine are
ventilating John Sherman's financial rec
ord. Its mosaic from top to bottom,
The Cleveland Herald (Republican)
says: The Grant boom may be booming
but nobody seems to be aware OF the fact
Three cents worth of green apples has
been known to arouse boys religious
convictions peculiarly sudden, as it were.
Bazaar.
From Sitting Bull. Esq, to H. Il. II.
King Cetywayo, K. G. b., Z. l. O.: U gh
big chief-come to my Eigwam share all
kill white man-play poker-drlnk
6re-water. | have spoken. -Neoo York
Commercial AdUertaser
A farmer writes: II saw in paper
that Western farmer planted flax with
potatoes and it kept the bugs off. l plant
ed fax with my potatoes, and the
fax came up first, and the bugs roasted on
it, waiting for the potatoes to come up.
The information has been slow in COM
ing, but the world is now informed who
the young lady is whose face adorns the
new silver dollar. She is Miss Anna w.
Williams, OF Philadelphia. Searching for
a true type of American beauty, the artist,
to whom the design of the new coin was
con6ded, selected Miss Williams for the
model,
Small girl very harshly to her doll in a
toy carriage, dolly having tumbied from
the seat "Sit right up you horrid old
thingl Don't you dare do that again or
I'll whip you" Seeing passer who had
approach unobserved, she modified her
voice and continued 10 dulcet tones:
Now, sit up straight, darling, and be
careful not to fall and hurt yourself"
PRoFEssoR-Y0 GU will repeat the lesson
on the battle of Bunker Hill. Student
latter long and painful silence) PLEASE
sir, | can't. Professor with frown)-
Why not2 Student (timidlyl-Because |
have been deceived. Professor (astouishedj
La what way? Student Lhumblyl i
have always been told that history repeats
itself, aud so | don't trouble to study the
| lesson,
We remember, when boy, reading in
our geography, under picture represent
ing a negro whose laundry bill could have
been butinsignifcant, standing beside por-
ous-l0oking sugarloaf affair, of the dan
ger Of stirring up an ant-hill like that of
which said sugarloaf was intended to be
a good likeness, And now will somebody
please rise and tell US who it was that FIRST
stirred up the Pearl of the Antilles p B0s.
ton Transcript.
The Boston Herald INDEPENDENT says
the three best jokes of the season, though
they are old. will be these: Ben. But
Ter as a Democratic candidate, asking
Democratic votes, after eighteen years
abusing that party. Ben. Butler, as a
friend of labor, asking votes as such, hi
being capitalist who pays labor the low
est wages, Ben. Butler as a reforner
when he has been, and is, the repre- senta
tive of the thing to be reformed"
The Washington Post has given Johr
Sherman some information in the follow
ing paragraph There isn't any doubt
Mr.. Sherman, that there was war il
this country half a generation ago. There
isn't any question that secession was trie(
and failed, and that the cause of secession
was dug up by the roots and destroyed
All this is true-as true as that yor
had a good time and waxed rich while
the terrible struggle went on, and hav,
, grown richer by the results of the wa
since it ended. But these facts will not b,
accepted as furnishing any reason VIII.
your party SHOULD overtRrn our tbeoE.
and system of government with your bay
onets at the polls. your bulldoZing Depu
ty Marshals and your third house OF con
Rress added as an annex to the Presidency
: No, Mr., Sherman, you and your fellow
campaiguers must get out of the grave
= yard of dead issues, and must face tn
9 damning facts of your recent record"
! Row tho Boy Did Ts,
3 The hotel boy been instructed. when b
knocked at Dean StanIey's door, an,
heard the inquiry, Who's there?" to re
ply, The boy my lord" The boy an
s swered the first call with considerabl
D trepidation, and surprised the dean by
= loud response to his question, THE lor
, ny bGy!'-lndtdnopoIis Secninss.
She Won't Be Beaten.
A hen out 10 the country is laying egg
measuring eight and one-half inche
e around the waist. She is evidently tire
r of hearing of ''haiIstones the size of hen
eggs" and is determined to inaugurate
reform in this particular. 1t is hope
I that all the hens in this country will tur
8 in and assist her in her laudable efforts. -
s Exeter Neaes- Letter.
e Comparative Evils.
S "WhatI You are not aware that thi
E.Il L l.. L r
n stead of sending him the small work {
coincidence you dun him for the two hume
= red francs that he owes you'll" H m
g | know that there are griefs which n
t words can console. and thought wa
doing him a service in giving anothe
course to his sad thoughts l'-Frenc
Paper
a Good Deal of Fuss About Tt.
= A darky was once attempting to steal
q goose, but dog raised an objection an
1t Sambo retired. The next night, during
y thunder shower, he attempted it agar
u and just as he was on the point of gettin
away with his fowl the lightning struc
1t close by and the noise nearly frightene
y the poor fellow to death. Dropping ii
% goose he started away muttering, Pear
- to me dar's heap of fuss made about or
old goose!"
Somebody Answer This.
There's a heap of philosophy in IL
y question which Washington young lad
q of the mature age of six propounded to b,
q aunt the other day. 1t was after the stol
q of the Creation and the Fall had been r.
lated, and the young lady had been med
! tatiug for some time on the moral of j