San Marcos free press. [volume] (San Marcos, Tex.) 1877-1892, 1879-01-04
NIT AM WISDOM.

full when the bluest.
Conn in king! Yes. corn is aching
most Of the time.
Why is dog like treeP-Becauss
both lose their bark when dead
If anything will reduce full grown
tat man it is we'll directed bank failure
In furnishing house the most hat
rack.tive furniture should be placed n
che hall.
The individual who was accidentally
injured by the discharge of his duty q
still very low.
SHE returned his love. but even then
he wasn't satisfied. She said she did
not want it.
1T may sound like parodox, yet tho
breaking of both wings Of an army il .
'nre way to make it fly.
The New York Herald tells of On
american young lady of IL springs
Probably her name is Sofy.-Bost0n
Post. tG bHor
MARY ANDERSON cleared $1,000 tn
New Haven, which she thinks will keep
.er in chewing gum for some time D
;um.
SwEEDLEpIpEs thinks that instead OF
,eople giving credit to whom credit
'redit is due, the cash had better b
mid.
A LITTLE boy, seeing for the first timp
pile of Holsters, exclaimed. "Oo-eel
hem's the biggest grasshoppers I ever
een!"
MoNTELLIER, notary, and Baron do
JhaffOy, to whom the means of escape
we're offered, refused to avail themselves
# them.
THE man who goes to church simply
ecause he has nothing to do, may not
'e heather, but he is certainly an idle
vorshipper.
"HAvE you cologne ?" she asked. mo
na'am" replied the druggist; II havB
10 scents ut all." She said he didt
ook as though he had.
WE don't believe Job was such an aw-
tul patient man after ALL He never tried
o collect money due on subscriptions
TO country newspaper.
A LITTLE girl was asked the meaning
# the word happy. She said: 1T is b
feel as if you wanted to give all your
things to your little sister
SENATOR David Davis slipped on p
banana peel the other day, and small
log that was trotting in his rear was
dattened out like book mark.
DANCING is the part of the religion
Of certain sect. If your girl becomes
convert to this form of worship, tho
hest thing you can do is to shaker.
AS soon rs young man can make hip
girl belief that rolled plate jewelry
protects the wearer from lightning he q
all o. X. for Christmas.--Free Press.
The Detroit Free Press says that
every coal dealer in Cincinnati belongs
to the church. They must be coal
blooded lot of Christians.---B0st01s
Post.
"GUILTy or not guilty 2? asked dutch
Justice of prisoner at the box. Not
guilty. he replied. "Den go about mil
your business, what der tyful do you
hereY
A CLERGYMAN out West has been
found guilty by church council of mot
always handling the truth with suffici.
ant carefulness to meet the demands H
veracity."
AN OK that had been eating ferment-
ed grain, which was in preparation for
making ale, became intoxicated and was
offered for sale by his owner as Corn
ed" beef.
A GENTLEMAN who has scoldin6
wife, in answer to an inquiry after her
health, said she was pretty well, only
subject at times to breaking out in
the mouth"
ALL the signers of the Declaration of
Independence signed their names with
quill pens except one-he signed his
Misrepresentation Journal Of
Commerce.
"Sare,' said Frenchman, wishing to
display his knowledge OF the English
language, did it rain tomorrow? yes,
Sare,' was the equally bombastic reply,
yes, sare, 1t vos.'
"CLosE up, my dears,' said the stage
mana ger to the ballet corps, at "dress
rehearsal and Spicer said if they did
clothes up any more, he would leave
ont of respect to Mrs. 3.
A DOCTOR went out hunting, and On
coming home complained that he
hadn't killed anything. "That's be-
cause you didn't attend to your legit,-
mate business, said his wife.