Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1879-04-17
miscellaneous.
~
Nv Summer Journey.


III be cannot love me when he hears !
am poor shop girl. he cannot love me al
all
All very well in theory. but very poor in
practice fold up Fred Lsngley's offer OF
marriage, aud sit down To write him that.
before he makes any further plans, with me
as one OF them, he must know thSt ! am
one of those superfuous beings, girl who
came into this world with no special place
prepared for her; that | have clerked al
sharp 4 Sniper's ever since ] was seven
teen-and ! am now tweniy-three; that !
have two Young sisters depending on me
for support. growing up In gawky, ill-clad
ugliness a shade palmer tl.an myself even.
some way, when first met him at that
pleasant summer resort, the first breath
had had out OF sharp 4 snipers store for
two years. was so happy | forget 10 men
ton the scrnbbing life had lett behind me
AZ home, and was sick OF poverty and
third rate people. | was glad to forget 1t.
How should he, being a man. know that
the dress wore hAd been turned twice; ;
that trimmed my bonnet my self that the
diamond ring | wore ! had borrowed from
ny married sister. being the unyalued relic
OF some forgotten lover Of hers; that the
beauty he said was In my face Was due 10
the happiness 10 his society: For ! do
think the old saying Be good and you viii
Ice happy" ought TO be reversed.
How did he know that charming naivete
OF mine was learned trying 20 induce Gus
toners TO buyf
Old Sniper always says, when he ex-
poets to sell large bill Of goods 10 custO-
mers
Let Miss 10 manage him she can smile
the dollars out OF his pockets u any one
can
So smile and smile. aud yet am no viii
lain, for they are enforced and impudcut
smiles tor bread aud butter.
How rosnd aud rosy | grew ia those few
weeks of ecstatic JOY. What lovely walks
and rides We had up and down the wood
path, and rAviues, What charming sails
through the deils. through the Witch :
Gulch and about the Devils Elbow.
How brilliant aud sgreeAble aud how
handsome my Fred was. Dare call him
INV Fred before he knows that am clerk
at sharp Il Sniper',i
am no >trong-mind-d woman: Track
ly confess that | do not Ike 10 take care OF
myself. | am no clinging vine. however.
having never had anything TO cling TO.
have grown up stiff and straight sll by my
self, like 4 weed In the middle OF bare
ten-acre lot.
Perhaps | will not make such bad wife
after all am good housekeeper, and,
having been no trouble or expense 10 any
one since can remember, do not see why
should be so very much trouble now,
even with my two sisters thrown in for
ballast. Still. Fred must know all about
the poverty and membranes, and make
up his mind accordingly. SO | waste Il
great many sheets OF paper writing an an
swer that shall be frank and truthful, and
yet ladylike.
inform him, IN my most genteel man
ner. that he must marry three when he
leads tne to the altar.
sent ii off in pink envelope. my heart
beating painful tattoo, as | think OF the
| elegant sister he has described 10 the, and
/ OF him. a rising young lawyer and mem
Der OF the Legislature.
piece down my sister Sophia's one sum
mer silk dress tor her, that | bought at
! such bargain thinking peradventnre there
NAV be a wedding soon. | do not scold
| MAY when she comes home late from the
I picnic with my best sash drenched aud
J soaked through, my lace fichu torn. and
! her toes through both her boots, aud creeps
| into bed beside me- hug her up into my
arms instead with that hungry, unsstisiied
! longing | always have for kisses and ca
resses; but she only says, lou strangle
me, Jo, you soft. mushy thing" and moves
along out OF my reach.
Nv name was never Jo, but have al
ways been called this on account OF my en-
forced manly accomplishments.
For a week | sing about the house Ike a
lark the next week l do not sing so much ;
the next week do not sing at all, but go
about hesvy-eyed and slow. and burst into
! tears when May sits down 10 the old. faint
| hearted piano and begins to storm away at
| al Bacio,r Fred's favori.e waltz and mine.
| | might have known all the tine that he
would never answer that letter; 1t has al
ways been my luck. Let me see how many
| lovers have had.
There was one waiting on me when faith
er died Of heart disease and left me penni-
less at seventeen. He came to see me after
| the funeral, and told me he had q great
sympathy and respect for me, and that he
| should Dever marry unless II was some
poor girl thrown on her own resources.
and with no one to take care of her, as he
| thought that was the true way for gentle
man to do; aud with these sentiments he
bowed himself out for the last time.
Most heavenly philosophy but then, he
married the same year the daughter OF a
wea thy gentleman who never did nything
harder in her life than to curl her front
| hair over slate pencils.
Then there was the young man who
wrote poetry, and threatened to die or
shoot himself if refused him-this was
years ago. He is now In good health and
\ has wife and two children; but always
hated men who wrote poetry.
Then there was Judge Featherby. He
visited me for year. and told me he loved
me: bat something he digDified by ths
name Of pride forbade him from saying
ANYTHING more. and have been heartily
plsd since that ne was ashamed of ne.
But the thought OF none of these well
disposed aud settled gentlemen made the
non arrival OF thst letter any easier for me
get weary and cross; my chest 10 getting
weak. and get faint and dizzy by spells
Some days when stand at the lace coun
ter waiting upon some fashionable iscy
who is pricing this and cheapening that,
think | shall fall over in dead faint iron
sheer exhaustion. Women are so muci
harder to suit than men, and ten to one, g
picking over everything and go out with
out buying anything very likely. because
so lew of them poor things. have any mon
ey OF their own to spend
The fall winds come, and l Walk 10 IN
store over beds of fallen leaves; then tha
long awful winter Of 1874 | wade throogl
high drifts and through storms that TAX
my breath away, to reach sharp 4 Snl
pers.