Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1879-03-29
l. SORTS.

A foot note-sole.

A foot nOte-sO'e.
Due as you wish to be duuned by.
A scientific club--the boomerang.
4 man who works with a villa
lawyer.
Ho" is it that a hot furnace is always
Coaled ?
Crate sympsthy-thst given to Jail
criminals.
An early crop of organ grinders is
inevitable.
The latest out-the boy who ia kept
after school
The beginning Of an end-the stump
Of q dogs tail.
An synonymous srticle--a baby before
it's christened.
To the tramp, home is where the hash
is Picayune.
Mince pie is no bRseless fabric of a
dream Picayune.
The more whisky straight a man takes
the more crooked he becomes.
She wrung her hands and tore her hair,
With ieelln' not benign,
And when up-btaided by her friends,
Exclaimed, - This hair is mine!'
No matter what rank vegetables may
attain, the cabbage viii always be a
head.
Women may become lawyers, but
women cannot sit on iuries They could
never agree.
Nature writes the best spring poetry
on green leaves, illustrated with flowers.
- Plcayune,
A happy mother of male twins enthu.
siastically refers to her treasures as her
" sweet boy and boy"
Music has charms to soothe ~theIsavage.
This is why we occasionally see a dog
with a brass band around his neck.
Who did the pillow share with ?-TNew
York Express, Well, it divided its fur.
rows pretty evenly all around the lot.
Simple pity amt much better to a
person than an insult but to pity him
with a five dollot bill is bizziness.--TJ,
Billings.
An Ohio man had his neck broken
while trying to break a colt. The safest
way to break a colt il to hire one of your
creditors to do it.
Tee proprietor of a bone factory an
nounces that persons leaving their bones
with him can have them ground at short
notice. Picayune,
"Satety at Sea- is the title of an ar,
ticle in the New York Express. But
it's impossible for many people to get
up to c. Picayuue.
The women are walking away from
the wash-tub.-[New YORK Commercial
Advertiser. Let us soap they will sud-
denly return TO it Albany Argus.
'rts Rn easy thing to sing for spring,
When the air is calm and breezy;
'Iiisnttzy thing Of spring 10 sing,
When your own head is wheezg.
First Swell" Look here, Fred, you
shouldn't wear so many big diamonds.
It's awfully bad form" Second Swell
Bless your soul, dear boy, they amt
real"
Mother is all the time telling me
not TO bolt my food" said the small boy,
and now she's gone and bolted up the
cupboard that has all the company vic.
tua's"
The ice men are going around saying
the ice Ia so thick they cannot cut it
without being put to a great deal of ex-
pense, consequently ice will be dear
next summer,
The dryest place in this country is
Greeley, Col. The region around has to
be irrigated for crops, and the men in
town have no saloons to call on when
their crops are parched.
Suggestion for an artist-Cupid asking
his mother not to tie the handkerchief
over his eyes 80 tightly this year-he
made 80 many fearful mistakes last
season. New York News.
A poet named Wells thus exuberates
in the New York Mail:
am glad, / am glad
am glad that the sum mer is comirg sgiin,
With i.ssunShiny days and Its showers OF rain
OF course. Wells have now a chance to
get full.
Mamma" ssid a little boy to his
mother in a railway carriage, "%little
children quite little children--only pSy
hall price, do tbeyW eyes, dear.
Why Because, mamma, what I
want to know, is, do old p~eopk-Quite
old p%eople-psy double ~