The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1879-01-23
PASSING SMILES.

The worst female companion for a
young man-Bet-N Y Erpress.
And the mea mearest-Lize.-Rome eenttneI
AVOID people with newly acquired
opinions. They are as stars of the first
magnitude in the constellation of bores.
WHAT pleasure it is 10 be continu-
ally told of our faults by those humbugs
whose virtues have never yet been de-
I tected.-Neu York Neacs.
WAeNER's new opera will introduce
several new and pleasing features, one
| of which will be q base drum beat by
mule with cymbals on his heels.-St.
| Louis Times-Journol.
"What is meant by conscience?'
asked an English schoolmaster of his
class. "a hinward monitor" "And
what do you understand by monitor?"
"a hironclad," repl ed the intelligent
youth.
A NEW YORK paper has this libelous
paragraph: Orange County has a
musical association that is over fifty
years old. One or two young ladies
have belonged to it ever since it was or
| ganized."
BRIGGs, who has for ten consecutive
| New Years made vow to smoke no
more, and broke it as often as made,
says he has decided this year to continue
smoking, and quit lying instead.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
A WIFE, having lost her husband, was
| inconsolable for his death. "Leave me
to my grief" she cried, sobbing; "you
know the extreme sensibility of my
nerves; mere nothing upsets them."-
Detroit Free Press. 80 ..-
THE California dairyist who put
rock in the center of every cheese he
shipped to South America was actuated
by the kindest feelings. He thought
the buyer of the cheese would want the
stone to kill the shippers with.-Detroit
| Free Press. f E 48
Who saws that this country is not get
ting more and more esthetic every year7
| Lick Skillet, Kan, has changed its name
| to Lake View, and although there is no
lake to view, the new name has much
more refined sound than the former
Detroit f. ee Press.
| A critic of an Eastern paper speaks OF
a yiolinist whose "objectivity of artis-
| tic instinct suffered from the predomi-
nance of his subjectivity Be little
nIa;ner if YOU please We are at a loss
| To understand whether string broke or
the bridge of the fiddle fell down.-hit
,caukee Sun.
II .to,a ora fonr /" oldest news
| 1T Is salo CneIe aio i10t - .I
| papers In America, unless ehTee VI Iueni
lie" And now the question arises, that
;f the honor is to be awarded to the
| naner that doesn't lie, is there any odd
| est newspaper in America" st al?-
] Io,,, InairnlI
Loa'so'''e ''o1' ':, - .:..;,a
| HOSTESS Swhispelins W ~ ;a 80 y
amateur wan. YOU fmbosa VI sa go ;s
Distinguished ama.u, ~ 49, 80 he1NaT
not quite "na' t;lI o,,;,e the
thought WASH 20 Uts t,+ 1here are
end. hostes a T vont so,ne of the
not ices enough anu ! " "'n' '0--'0
people to go.
/ A MASSACHUSETTS woman was So 50
Jealous oi a;nJ nsI sha refnsed to allow him
wnen S ne ~ tol;da hsr She remarked
W p1 ou-.eJ - Of the funeral. az
70 the uhuei 49, :. ~ e,yo,na a-lean-
am aeolh ~ 10 - -tba resurrection
In on Jin an :. -, -.
Gay II 4 KIN heip i'' W.
drea0s oosd'. ,rre r.-----..
|
Hsn ne.o9e SsS an and mine of tender thought
And many quaint dey Sc by n. is 1s w5pp a. M
Whsa Ss hal c1me, viii he entreaf and pray
To see the ls .endf Wii his MS hear, De ngst. ta9sp.
Ipy Imus, unsesSe. Uiy sses is away.
But when my hero sh al at las, have come.
And hs G dear % eyes sts@wRegns eave RaS iip. be dumb
MY hearts great love unspoken7 Then must you
pear woven hing n he pc ewes and sess eessins eneek
10 tell MN A'' : ''s'' 'N' e-''' Ella Dfets.
c.rr1n.1sv;1l not eat the flesh Of
, 'ohors 0hM ass hacanse It tastes of tobacco
Euorvhodv has been abusing this elias:
80 aoo;ety ftbe smokers). and all the
y, Sooy H. one heen working to banisl
E fr,n, the earth one of the most revoltins