Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1879-04-11
Qnips.
Missing mon Rad marksmen.

A homestreteh Over mothers
&nee--Puek.
Travellers should leave their jewelry
at home--all but their bracelets-whica
are nice for two wrists,
Prize fights furnish novel reading now
aud then; they SAVIOR somewhat of the
Jaw,jelly-it order.
Ii \ classic Greek were Had be like.
~ IL Troy homeopathic physician,
wouldn't heg--Gmph(o,
A little boy, when reproved for break.
new roc&ing-horSe said whats the
good of horse till it's hrokeg"
There is no disgrace in being poor,
the thing is, TO keep It quiet, and not
let your neishhors Know anything about
il.
"rakc back the heart that thou
gavcst,' rs the gambler said to his pal,
who had passed him tho wrong card to
fill the flush.
\ correspondent explains why he
hadn't written before Ivy saying that he
could not "get money enough together
to buy postal card, Fond ia Lac Re-
porter.
IA, what does nohhy mcan9" "Styl.
ish, my dear" "Woll, then, pa, your
nose must bc very stylish, for grandma
says you've got tho knohhirSt noSo in
town."
II is not considered cuchawcd TO
speak ot the Pilgrim Fathers rs haviny
come over i'll the May-lowcr. They
came in the trailing arhutus, YOU know.
-BOdon Pos,
"Whv does dog chew bone after
it Is devoid Of meatY' mn inquisitivce N.
change asks. That is easy to answer,
you've often heard of dread in the
bone" and it's the bread the dogs after.
An ale gu1zler doesn't stop to consid-
or that every time he drinks he is add
ing an alo To his coffin, BOSTON Post.
A result no doubt owing to the tacks on
spirits. Nee York Commercial Adrtrti@r.
The people Of Ceylon bake and eat
bees. Ii We were going 10 indulge i'll
this kind of provender we should want
to know that the baker understood his
business, for If II bee should revive after
being swallowed - - Cincinnati Bndk-
fast Table.
In answer to Shakospcare's conun.
drum, Whats i'll a Nance the SYRIA.
cuse Tones says that il II is u Russian
Generals namo the entire alphabet il
in il.
sydney Smith once rchukcd swear
ing visitor by saying, " Let us assume
that everything and everybody are
damned, and proceed with our subject. "
Twonty-minute sermons arc an
nouncod in Chicago. Is the West nj.
ways To get ahead of New York in aid
visahle entertainments --Noo York Her
aid.
Coming events cast their shadows
before" Short-sighted instructor, who
has kissed his hand to Hollis H. ~ he
enters; q, | bog pardon, Mr.. llolworhy,
thought it was Miss Rosebud iidr-
rdrd Ldmp0on.
Professor lin composition class -
"Iou may have for one of your subjects
for your next essay, Manners. ID.
'Sl-"Can we write on bau manners in
collcgeH' Professor Certainly, write
about whatever you are best acquainte5
with. - Yale Record
An old-lasioned lady wants to know
why the graduates OF Vassar and other
female" colleges always have their
agos printed after their names in reports
of alumni meetings-Miss |. Smith,
president ('70l; Miss Jones, vice prcsi-
dent (60l; Mrs. Robinson, secretary C7s),
etc, etc.
Boston preoooity-Jack jagged 10
years or uuder) Il trust, Tommy
tina, you believe in the non-essentalily
Of n pre-existent cause" Tommy: ooh
certainly. At loast | 90 no further back
than the primordial atomic globulc. =
Excunt, driving their hoops. Harvard
1ampoon.
Things quoted David, in poetcal
mood, "are not what they seem" "Ol
course not" commented Sadie, 1.-THE
sewing machine seems, but everybody
knows the machine isn't tho shirt il
seems" And then nobody said any
thing for long time, and David made
some remark about people who couldn't
appreciate sentiment. burlington HdWk.
eyC.