The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1879-04-30
BRIC-A-BRAC.
His trials in a Crowded Vehicle
Sugar Three Hundred
Pounds.

Pounds.
To the Editor Of The MorristOwn Gazette:
My unvarying evidence has beer
that your head was horizontal, anC
since your remarks Ia few numbers
back upon summer board, my con
victions are that quicksilver will re
main thereon.
Before 1 proceed, say to ''Clinch'
he has my hand, as / know neither
Of as bear malice, and long may we
both unduIate ornaments to the GA.
zETTE. Fathoms deep bury / the
bull, while upon his breast rests that
o'ertasked mud.turtle.
contend farm houses are no let
up to business wearied man. He
may derive relaxation from the
green apples and gooseberries, but
the thing bucolic is a delu-
sion and a snare, except for children.
Mountains, goOd-spriDgs. better
sea shore, best To say nothing of
the shutterless houses. hot rooms,
and feather beds-the display Of an.
imated nature is too thick. There is
the '.jack" upon board wages; the
cow just separated from her calf; the
bark-smitten cur, With his co-workers
o'er hill and dale; and at least enc
rooster who neVer knol0S the hour.
Talk of bRsky dells, ripping rills,
and towering meads-have we not
the briar patch, the poison vine and
the skunk cabbage, with US also?
And ''when the evening shades pre-
vail the moon takes up her wondrous
tall" presenting the pinch bug with
boom, zip, and finally scramble down
the wall. The iRsinuating mosqui'
to, whO gets in your ear, and who
is resisted in vain. Then, when
tired nature seeks sweet repose, the
bland bed bug goes on duty. You
know 3 bed bug when you meet bim.
The swan pours forth her ebbing life
in sweet song; the dying dolphin, in
his agony, rivals the bow of heaven
but, gentlemen, when a bed bug
"pegs out" you had better make an
assignment-real and personal and
go West. Need l speak of the pert
sweat bee, the graceful wasp, the
far-seeing hornet, and the gentle
yellow jacket and snakes-lawsey
me!
Much of these false ideas derive
value from accepted tradition. For
instance tits said "thou shalt earn
thy bread by the sweat of thy brow
OF course, this includes both harvest
field and bake oven. Another an
tique remark. "'Tis poor rule that
wont work both ways" Ergo, if TO
gain bread you must sweat, then,
whenever you sweat, you gain bread.
Logical, Pm sure.
Years ago, l was a handsome
young man, dwelling in the Key
stone State. 'Tis a great country
for good roads and singing schools,
and as ''g. r." is to IS. g." so is IS.
g." to lot of nice girls 10 be gallant
ed home. A night in June it hap.
pened. Twas a silvery whispering
night; the air fragrant as Arabia or
Ceylon. In slowing the wagon, but
one seat was left for "me querida"
and yours sincerely. 1 couldn't sit
in her lap, 80 she sat in mine.
'Twasn't much lap, but meyer you
mind. As long as she sat still all
was well, but bimeby she must join
in the chat and laugh. Now, every
time she gave an extra smile, she
would rise up and come down with q
fearful ker-slunge her feet flying up
and her dear head back, giving me
bash in the nose with her hair. /
don't generally object to my nose
and girls back hair interviewing,
but when that back hair Is full of
bandoline and hair pins, then l
throw myself on an enlightened pub.
lie sentiment, When she came
down. the impact was fearful; for
you see outside few pounds of
shoes, belt, ETC., she was solid girl.
couldn't give. and she wouldn't,
SO soe Just spread. Came once nigh
showing q spooney couple, seat
ed aside ns, clean out Of the wagon.
Did l sweat9 Sweatg Yes, in
beads Teamed three days. cooked
rations. and every once in a while
she would turn her pretty head and
say with amazing dulcet, "Oh Brio.
excuse me-" Then I'd look like a
calf and suffer on. When we un-