New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1879-10-08
Mr.. Bankers Picture.

"Your charge against Mr.. Barker,
the artist here,'' said the Magistrate,
"is assault and battery, l belieye?''
eyes, sir.''
"And your name is --''
"Potts! am art critic Of the Week.
~ Spy"
estate your case"
~ called at Mr.. Bakers studio
upon his invitation to see his great
picture, just finished, of George Wash-
ington cutting down the cherry tree with.
hishatchet.' MIR. Barker was expecting
to sell it to Congress for fifty thousand
dollars. He asked me what thought
of it, and after l had pointed ont his
mistake in making the handle of the
Ratchet twice as thick as the tree, and
in turning the head of the Ratchet
around so that George was cutting the
tree down with the hammer end, I
asked him why he foreshortened
Georges leg SO as to make it look as
If his left foot was upon the mountain
on the other side of the river"
"Did Mr.. Barker take it kindlyp"
asked the Justice.
swell, he looked little glum; that'a
all. And then when asked him why
no put q guinea pigup in the tree, and
why he painted the guinea pig with
horns, he said that it was not a guinea
pig, but COW, and that it was not in
the tree, but in the background. Then
I said that. if had been painting
George Washington should not have
given him the complexion OF salmon
hrSnVrs oh
him two thumbs on each hand;
and l should have tried not to slew
his right eye around 50 that he could
see around tho back of his head to his
left ear. And Barker said, Job.
wouldn't you? Sarcastic, Your Honor.
And I said no, T wouldn't; and I
wouldn't have painted oak-leaves on
cherry tree, and wouldn't have left
the spectator in doubt as to whether tho
figure off by the woods was a factory
chimney or q steamboat, or George
Washington's father taking a smoke"
(which was it?'' asked the Magis-
trate.
II don't know. Nobody will ever
know. So Barker asked me what I'd
advise him to do. AID I told him I
thought his best chance was to abandon
the Washington idea, and to fix the
thing up somehow to represent the
Boy who stood on the Burning Deck
I told him he might paint the grass red
to represent the flames, and daub over
the tree SOS it would look like the
mast and pull Georges foot to this
side of the river SOS it would rest
somewhere on the burning deck, and
maybe he might reconstruct that fac
tory chimney or whatever it was, and
make it the Captain, while he could ar
range the guinea pig to do for the Cap
tain's dog"
"Did he agrees'
"ae said the idea didn't strike him.
So then suggested that he might turn
it into Columbus discovering America.
Let George stand for Columbus, and
the tree be turned into q native, and
the Ratchet made to answer for q flag,
while the mountain in the background
would answer for the rolling pillows Of
the ocean. He said he'd be hanged If
it should. So I mentioned that it
might, perhaps, pass for the execution
of Mary, Queen of Scots. Put George
in black for the headsman, bend over
the tree and put frock on it for Mary,
let the Ratchet stand, and work in the
guinea pig and the factory chimney as
mourners. But Barker said that there
would be somebody worse hurt than
Mary, Queen of Scots, If kept on.''
Didn't like it, heye'
dispose not. And said that while
Ibid not want to force my advice upon
him, I would say, If my opinion was
asked, that the best hope Of that pict-
| ure would be to make it q represents
ton Of the Deluge. Build in an ark
around George, put shirt on him and
call him Noah, crowd in other animals
with the guinea pig, let the factory
chimney do for Mount Ararat, and the
tree for the stovepipe projecting from
the roof Of the ark. just g had got
the words out Of my mouth Barker
knocked me clean through the picture.
Ny head tore ont Washington's near
LEG, and my right foot carried away
about four miles of the river. We had
it over and over on the floor for q
while, and finally Barker whipped. ]
am going to take tho law OF him In the
interests Of Justice and high art. .
So Barker Was bound over, and Mr..
l'otts went down to theoflce of the 8ps
to write mp his criticism.-Aag AdslG,
u n. 7. RS.s'y.
II u estimated that the total prn1ina
ton Of petroleum IN Pennsylvania m
e increased b midsummer to t0,00(