Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1879-02-22

Ultimately my malady reached
stage where seemed to realize both
physical and mental double existence.
At times I could distinctly see the
form and features of my second self,
directly confronting and gazing upon
my more immediate self. And then my
own voice addressed me, and we con-
versed together-myself and second
self-now condoling in common misery,
and then giving vent to tantalizing and
horrible imprecations.
The terrible delusion became unbear-
able and felt that reason could not
much longer retain command of the
disordered faculties. 1t was night
when my mental agitation had reached
high degree. My wife had fallen
asleep, overcome with the constant care
and watching. I was pacing the sitting
room of our chamber, about the hour
of midnight, as was my habit. Occa-
sionally 1 reclined on a sofa, in the
hope of catching slight respite from
the distress of my terrible hallucina-
ton but it was for moment only.
l lay down again on the sofa. My
brain seemed whirling in blaze of
fire, and l sprung up stricken with
madness. The horrible spectre stood
before me and Knocked me with fiend
ish grin of derision. Igrasped aheavy
piece of furniture aud dashed at it with
the fury of maniac. The specific
seemed palpable to the blow, and
yielded. l saw it vanish in darkness
that spread before me, and my torment
ing second self was gone. 1 broke
forth in frantic laughter, that returned
in a hundred echoes around me, and l
sank exhausted, unconscious to the
floor.
The morning sun was shining in upon
me when l awoke to returning con-
seriousness. A cool perspiration oozed
from my forehead. Irose on my elbow,
and, for some moments, endeavored to
recall my identity and the recollections
of the night. Then horrible convic-
ton came upon me. Great heavensl
1t was she! 1t was my poor devoted
wife-the reality of the form I had
dashed down and destroyed in my
frenzy!
Overwhelmed with remorse, 1 rushed
wildly from the house and fed knew
not whittier. The greater grief that
had come upon me terminated my
mental power, and I became calm in
despair but 1 shrank cowardly from
the desolation that my own hand had
wrought.
1t was some weeks after the dreadful
night I have described that I reached
New York city without detection, a
greater portion Of the distance working
as one of the crew of a canal boat.
wandered along the wharves of the
metropolis, searching anxiously for
some means of escaping the country,
and longing even to flee the fellowship
of civilized man. The opportunity
was finally discovered in a ship about
sailing around Cape Horn for the Pa
cific Coast, on board of which my SER
vices were accepted in a mental Ca
pacity.
was soon safe from discovery and
pursuit, and free upon the boundless
waters-free as one could feel with the
remorse of hellish crime upon his
soul, and the abandonment of all hope
of happy hour in life again.
I need not describe the experience
of long and tedious sea voyage, and
the hardships and indignities put upon
me in consequence of inefficiency and
total ignorance of a seamans duties.
To me it was of little account. But
the change of life and scene, and the
sea air had wonderful effect in repair
ing my mental and physical strength.
1t was on bright September morning
that first spied the hazy shores of
California, and in day or two there
after sauntered along the streets of San
Francisco, alone in new world, with
only the companionship of bitter recol-
lections.
As necessity required I sought en-
ployment, and managed to sustain N.Y.
self, leading a listless, purposeless sort
OF life. But the monotony soon be-
came oppressive, and the apprehension
of ultimate discovery excited renewed
anxiety. Frequently fancied the rec
ignition of familiar countenance on
the street, that kept mel in painful I'M
certainty.
The day came in which my worst
fears were realized. The miserable
wretch in whose house Twas sojourning
delivered me into the hands OF Justice
BY what means he discovered my iden-
tity I could not determine but met
my fate boldly for remorse had SO far
embittered my existence that I dis
dained longer to struggle for its con-
tinuance.
Gentlemen" I exclaimed, as the
officers enclosed my wrists with iron
shackles, " take your accursed reward!
-! am Charles Harden, the murderer.
from -"
They dragged me to the prison and
the officers of the law came and ques-
toned me. I told them all and they
transferred me to more secure confne-
ment. lest should escape again the
retribution of crime.
Long I fingered in the solitude of a
gloomy cell. awaiting the final decree
of fate. until calm indifference sue
ceeded despair, and gradually every
emotion, even life itself, seemed to SUBJ
side into dream.
But day came when nv sensibili-
ties seemed terminated, like one emerg-
ing from trance. Slowly my mind
manifested activity, and in time re-
called my identity then suddenly the
nnAIV