Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1879-08-31
WIT AND WISDOM.

WIT AND WISDOM.
Cursory Notwithstanding
The floating pupulation-fshes.
Rabid transit-Career of mad doc.
The knobbiest part of the house is the
door.
A man of violin temperament Ole
Bull.
Now is the time to muzzle the dogs
and muslin the girls.
eft ''old dog Tray was ever faithful?"
how could he be-tray?
The stuff some United States senators
are made of-Ballot-box stuff.
Snodgrass says in men of small calibre
you generally find great bore.
Money that bank officers get away
with is charged to running expenses.
1t is peculiar feature of the butter
market that a bad article outranks a good
one.
A kneemotion play-When an an
CRY mother lays her offspring across her
knee.
The Philadelphia Item speaks of the
turn of the organ-handle as an Italian
revolution.
"But Twill not linger upon this point"
as the preacher said when he sat down on
a carpet tack.
There is great trouble with Mount Et-
ma this season. The Italians cannot keep
the crater quiet.
Never mind being made fun of. It is
better to be deer-ided than cow-hided.-
Boston Transcript.
Don't buy your boy pair of gloves
until after the Fourth of July. He may
need only ont. glove then.
1t must have been in the green cherry
season that Tennyson wrote, "frcm our
waist places comes a cry"
and the iroa entered into my sole,"
said Grayhcd, as he pulled the tack out
of the bottom of his slipper.
There's nothing gives stone to the
stomach like ripe cherries, swallowed
wholc.-Cincin,'ati Enquirer.
A horse thief was hung at Sidney, Ne
braska, the other day. He went West
to go up with the country, and succeeded.
The Cincinnati Star wants the police
to club together. No use they won't
dot while the supply of citizens holds
out.
First impressions are lasting, as the
sChoOl-master SAID when he introduced
himself to the new school by logging all
hands.-Boston Transcript.
The small boy may get chilled going
in swimming, in these early days, but he
gets warmed up when his mother finds
his shirt on wrong side out.
eff the Sahara is flooded, what?" asks
a contemporary craving for information
Our opinion is that if such an operation
takes place it will be decidedly damp.
Ifall the poor butter made in this coun-
try were good butter and brought good
price, the producers would get hundred
million dollars year more than they do
now.
A widow refuses foppish bore; she is
not ready to get married yet, she says.
MADAME, am your servant, can wait"
30, we'll, you look as though you did,
At what restaurant, pray?'
Are you building air-castles in Spain,
Mr.. Jones?" said land!ady to ooarder,
who was thoughtfully regarding his cof-
fee-cup "No madame; only looking
over my grounds" replied Jones.
"When do you intend to 90 back,
Mike?" asked one exile of another. eff
I live till I doye, and God knows wheth-
er will or not, I intend to visit ould
Ireland once more before lave this cOun-
try
why" asked a governess of her little
charge, 'do we pray God to give US our
daily bread? Why don't we ask for four
or FIVE days, or week." Because we
want it fresh," replied the ingenious
child
An orator who was much in demand
in political campaigns, being asked by an
admirer of the secret Of his success, re-
piled: "When I have facts, I give 'em
facts; but when I haven't, yell and saw
the air.
Shocked and aston1shed old deacon
"You bad and wicked boy, why don't
you take off your hat in the House Of the
Lord?" Bad and wicked boy Overcome
with guilt)-"If you please, sir. I'm a
little GIRL
The old lady who ''thanked Heaven she
had been able to borrow enough money to
pay all her debts" has many imitators in
these days; but the best method with a
debt, after all, is to pay it outright Men
York Herald.
'Do the dying suffer pain9" is ques-
ton that is being considerably discussed
by scientific men. We don't know about
the dying, but we do know the living
suffer payin', particularly if it is payin'
subscription to newspaper.
A member of Scotch School Board
recently began an address to some chill
dren thus: "Noo, my BARNS. wor a.
like ships,-some in port, some cot in
mid-ocean an some near the haven. Ye're
just leavin' p ort; as for me, I'm half
seas over"
"You do make that child look like a
fool, wife, with all that toggery on him ~
said Mr.. Fag, angrily, as they were start.
ing out for walk. "Dear me-" said a
neighbor. meeting them at the door, what
doll of baby, and how much he resenl.