The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1879-06-12
wit and 1HllmOr.
There was an old man in Montana,
At one rlllp tried tO gorge a han ona

iisSs ~ one Sup trleQ 10 gorge q pan ana,
ls 1t stuck in his throat.
+ And he straightway did float
lS9 To the beautiful land Of Hosanna
| aYouth is the rsaucy- age of life. r.- ., 80.
/ Didayou ever have q apig invite you ytc
his sorse!
'Tis butter step from the cream pan tc
the churn.
S Song of the dry goods clerk" "Swing
ling in delaipe"
Tsr The airs in an opera singers head arc
all numbered. zL %-Ga Z I4cbcs r.
Dressmakers and butchers are evel
weltering in gore.
A gambler would rather let you out
than let you win.
/ A chattle mortgage is a lean and hungry
'Cash-us."
When you want to raise the wind, the
m ilIion-air is pretty nice
Wine is the key which fits the paddock
OF a mans secrecy. So is beer.
Always keep your boots clean, for
cleanliness is divine attri-boot.
The man who was lost in slunlbcr prob
ably found his way out on nightmare.
Landlords are loosing so much by their
tenants that they ought to get up an in
sure-rents company.
The force of habit made Scranton
barber ask while shaving corpse,
''DOes the razor hurtI
We know fisherman who is said to be
crazy, but we ale prepared to prove that
he is q seine man.
They say Il strong grasp Of the hand
bctokens a strong heart. What magni-
ficcnt heart a lobster must have.
Ten to one that the woman who says
your children are not ''half raised raises
her own youngsters by the ears.
When a. man. does us a kindness we
call him brick, when he. does. us an
unkindncss we want to hit him with
one.
Speaking Of generosity, you wouldn' t
call man who had gouged piece out
of the bottom Of his foot a whole soled
fellow, would you3
Man can do many thing, but there is
one thing he cannot do; he can't button
on a new collar, just after cutting his
thumb-nails without looking up in the
air.
THE reason I got my ears boxed,'
|. said Johnny, was cause when the mo-
thcr said ncighbor had borrowed hen
of her, I said the lcnt-hen season had ar
rivcdn
Little Nephew-"Wha are fowls,
auntie?' Aun tie" Creatures with wings,
dear, such as. hens and ducks,
Little Nephcw-'Angels are fowls too,
aren't they, Auntic:"
Remark Of severe parent to blooming
daughtet upon discovering the fact that
one Of the legs of the big chair in the
parlor had been broken the Sunday even
ing previous: 81 wish you to under
stand Susan, that this chair was con-
structed with view to the accommoda-
tion of one person at time, and has not
the strength and scarcely the capacity
for two
81 A short time ago a little boy went with
his father to see a colt. He patted the
colts head and made quite fuss over it,
until finally the stableman told him to be
careful thet the colt did not turn round
and kick him. When the little chap
went home, his father asked him what he
thought of the colt II like him pretty
well" was the reply. "He's real tame in
front, but he's awful wild behind"
81 should like to have you raise club"
said 1x9 book -canvasser to a daughter
of Erin, as he stood on the front step try
ing to talk her to death on the subject Of
the "Extinction of the Tribes Of the
Seventh Century, 81 WILL said Biddy,
as she reached around behind the door,
"but bad luck to your picture if you are
lingering around here when get it
raised"
singularly, no one stood up when a
wise man at meeting in Williamson,
N. Y, to adopt measures to find out who
sets fire to buildings, suggested: 'Thc
shortest way to get at the root Of the mat
ter would be for the man who set fire to
the building to rise up in the audience
and own the whole thing g e.