Stevens County tribune., 1879-08-14
JUVENILITIES.

| A beautltnl custom prevails In many
parts of Europe of planting a tree upon
the birth of every child. 1t saves wear
and tear of slippers.
Little boys now 90 down to the river,
stick their toes in the water and exclalm,
Its getting bully" What IN the world
can they mean?
The other day professor in German
asked an unregenerate JUNIOR what the
| gender of certain noun was. The Jun
ior quickly replied: II think it is neu-
ter, sir. At any rate, it is neu-ter me-
A boy may not be as good judge of
things as his father, but he will never
allow the latter to select a .jack-knife for
hlm-if he can help it.
"Never mind, sonny, the rain makes
boys grow" remarked Massachusetts,
tramp the other day when he took silk
umbrella away from lad in the midst
of a rain storm.
"Professor, is there any danger of dis
turbing the magnetic currents if exam
inc that compass too closely2" And the
stern Professor, loving his little joke,
promptly responded, mo, sir, brass has
no effect whatever on them
When you see woman going toward
the river with good sized pole in her
hand and wrinkle across her nose, you
needn't think she's gong fishing. Not
much; she's got boy dewn that way
who promised her, with tears in his eyes,
he wouldn't go in swimming.
Professor lin composition class )-"You
may have for one of your subjects for
your next essay, Manners "Can we
write on bad manners in college? Pro-
fessor-"Certainly; write about whatever
you are best acquainted with
I 1t seems that the eleven school chill
dren who died SO suddenly at Jacobs
Mill little village in Northern Vermont,
were not poisoned at the brook, as at first
supposed, but were the victims of diph-
liberia, induced by foul pools and sinks
under and around the schOol-house. The
warning Is seasonable.
A little girl at school read thus: "The
widow lived On limbacy left her by a
relative" 'What did you call that word2'
asked the teacher; "the word is legacy,
not limbacy." "But," said the little girl,
''my sister says must say limb, not leg.
In primary school not very long ago
the teacher undertook to convey to her
pupils an idea of the hyphen. She wrote
ON the blackboard ''Bird nest" and
pointing to the hyphen, asked the school,
"What is that fol!' After short pause
a young son of the Emerald Isle pipe
out ''PlaZe, ma am, for the bnrd to roosht
on!'
This is the way in which Sunday
school boy ratified off the Third Com
mandment, with the effect of making his
mother think he was giving a Cherokee
version of a verse of hymn:
Shltnut AXE thname
| ThlblofLhe godn vain;
! Flordnut oldim giltis
| TakthiSnauin vain.
"Look at that little creaturer' the
friend said. "By Jove, that's the small
est man ever saw in my liten "Really
his companion carelessly rejolned eyes
really and truly, too" ''Do you NEAR
to say you have ever seen smaller?
said the friend, and he soon got his an
swer. "My dear fellow, ! know a mar
so small that if he has pain he can
tell whether he has sore throat or {
stomach ache
| Her voice was ever soft,
Gentle and low; an excellent thing in WON
an
And when Shakespeare wrote that he mus
have been thinking Of the precise juno
ture when mans wife tries to tell lin
clear across a Mh hole roomful of company
that one of his euspcnders has fetched
loose and is swinging in the breeze abou
three and one, half inches below the fur
the1est reach OF his ultimate coat-tail.-
| B1tTLIn0tOn H09ckeUe