The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1879-01-04
The Allowance.

new pair Of shoes, new pair of gloves, a
ribbon, they must 90 and enter into an
explanation about il all with the husband,
and very possibly before their children,
who can not but be injured by the lesson
they thus learn concerning the dependence
Of their mother, not to mention her falli-
bility, which is apt to be tolerably well ex-
posed in the course of the conversation.
II seems to us something unnecessary
to state that man should not marry
woman unless he can trust her with suffi-
cient money to keep herself in the array
she judges to be fit and proper for his wife
to wear-unless, that is, he has found her
previously in possession of enough common
sense to be certain that she will not waste
his means, and will appreciate his situation
in regard to money matters, and be anx-
ious to help him out every way; and that
made sure, it is singular carefulness that
refuses to trust her with the money that
she needs. Nothing, surely, can SO belit-
tie wife, and make her unfit to be the
mate and helpmeet sho should be, as to
dwarf and crowd her into cowardly sup
pliance for the things tAat she feels she
must have and can not do without. We
have known of women whose proud spirits
were SO hurt by the ordeal that they have
worn their shoes to the ground, and have
turned and secured and pieced and "made
over" for years, while looking like shabby
genteel beggars, rather than ask for their
right and due, while their husbands never
gave a thought to the matter as long as
they heard no complaint, and as for them.
selves, wore the best the tailor could give
them and We have known other women
who, determined, after sore experience,
neither to 60 without nor to beg, lay in
wait to rob their husbands pockets of
half dollar this week and a quarter that,
making false entries in the housekeeping
accounts, and even stealing and selling the
hens eggs to swell the secret amount into
a sum sufficient to keep themselves aud
their children simply decent, becoming
thieves in the process, and liable to trans
nit the tendency to dishonest dealings to
children born after the habit was formed,
owing to the penury or tho distrust of
their husbands. If man Is really poor,
and is struggling hard to keep his head
above water, he has some justification
but if his wife is worthy of the name of a
wife, even then she will do better for being
trusted in the matter, and not having to
run to him for money to buy every spool
of thread that is needed.
1t was early in the power of the fathers
of these wives to have obviated, to some
extent, the difficulties of this nature which
were to surround their daughters later in
life. If, as soon as the girl left school, the
father, with the advice and supervision of
the mother, gave to her fixed sum out of
which, and with no more, she was to fur
nish her wardrobe, by the time of her
marriage she would have learned perfectly
how to spend money and how TO get the
most for il; and her lover would be pref
ty sure to have information of tho fact,
and be able to govern himself accordingly,
and either maintaining the same amount,
or increasing or diminishing it, as his own
income required, would still have recog-
nized the fact, and left her that little but
necessary independence which her own
purse gives to every woman.
Let us look at the subject a moment,
and see if there is any right or reason in
this abject attitude which the wife is com
PEELED to assume upon the subject of her
expenditures. The wife of whom we
speak-that is to say, not the wife of the
great and rich, but of the middle class of
somewhat prosperous peoples usually
worker in the family as much as her hus-
band Is out of it, The saying constantly
goes that it is he, the husband, who is
earning the bread and butter of the house !;
to our way of thinking that working wife
is also earning, and in fit proportion. But
for whom is she working and earning
For herself2 No, the law says otherwise /:
the proceeds are her husbands; she de-
pends on him for any Of them she can do
nothing with them during his life, and on
his death, she surviving, but a small por-
tion is allotted her by this law, which,
generous as it has grown in comparison to
its old favor, still stops short of any point
like equal rights. If, then, she is not
working for herself, but for another, she
is entitled to some wages, aud some other
wages than love and Kindness. For what
is 1t that she does2 In many houses the
wife is only the servant; she Is cook,
maid-of-all-work, nurse, and seamstress !;
she is tailoress for the boys trousers, mil
liner for the girls bonnets ten to one
makes, if she does not cut and baste, their
frocks; and in any one of the capacities,
it is universally recognized, for every 9th
er worker, that the laborer is worthy Of
his hire. As mere cook or char-woman.
her wages would be more than hundred
dollars year with board as nurse or
even more while neither tai
loress nor dress maker would have much
less than dollar day; and meanwhile
we pass over her general management,
overseeing, mendipg, darning,
and all the rest, because there the wages
Of love may be deemed sufficient, and
doubtless she deems them so for all. and
when she asks, asks not half so much for
herself as for the sake Of maintaining the
decency and good name and good appear
ancc which it would be to the shame of
others if she did not have.
We think that husband who has any
Of income would do we'll to take
the subject Of his wife's wages into ac-
count, and consider whether she deserves
nothing more than the honor of the name,
without the right Of cent to It, or the
spending of one unquestioued dollar, and
then to make, according to his ability,
some fixed allowance Of money, be it ever
80 small, on which the wife can rely, and
over which she win be absolute mistress.
There is not one wife in ten thousand that
will abuse the pleasant confidence and all
but that one will be likely to make it COW
or some of the childrens and some of the
general family expenses besides their own;
aud it can be done at first Professionally,
for one year or for two, so that in cases
where it will not work well return to the
old system Of dependence and petition
could be had. We could hardly, however,
think Of possible case where L would not
work well, where it would not give the
balance to light head that comes with
trusfad resnonsihilitv and 20 ,bo o...>s.:.