The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1879-09-25
GThe Syndicate ~

If there is any one thing that the Democratic
party of the North loves more than another, 1t
is the man who served in the Union army
That party always did love the Union soldier
they loved him so tenderly here in Ohio that
they declared he should not go South and get
killed by the brave Democrats down there. In
fact, if he did 90 South, that he would have to
go over the dead bodies of the Northern Demo-
Gratis. From that day to this, their love for him
has never waned.
The older. anti-war Democrats here in jack
son, including Gen. Bluster, love the Union
soldier just as fondly now as they did during
the dark days of the Democratic rebellion.
Hence these men all shouted for joy when they
| heard that the Democrotic State Convention
had nominated a soldier-and their enthusi-
asm knew no bounds when they learned that
| the brave Gen. Rice the hero of a thousand
battles, and the chieftain more distinguished
| than Cesar, Frederick or Napoleon, was COM
ing. More distinguished, because neither Ce-
sar, Frederick nor Napoleon ever voted for Val
landigham, and Gen Rice DID.
OF course so distinguished a soldier should
have grand reception-and the Howard at
once began to gather up the faithful. quo
rum of the Syndicate having arrived, Gen.
Bluster stated the object of the meeting, and
said that he hoped they would give Rice
blank good reception. Hoped some one who
had been in the army would assist in arrang-
Isaac the Slim happened to be going down
street to notify the trustees that he had found
another pauper, and paused at the meeting in
time to suggest Long Ed. a Democrat who
had served in the army.
(which army did he serve in?" asked Lewis
the Sleepy.
'sThe Reb-"
Immediately there was tremendous cheering,
and Long Ed. was called for. He, however,
Aov Cnil-
the Tall Butternut volunteered to act as mill
tary chieftains.
Spike-nose addressed the meeting at some
length.
"My fellow Democrats" said he, "the man
who comes tomorrow is one of the most distin-
guished soldiers the world ever saw. The star
of Fame dances upon his crest as gaily as the
moonbeams upon the mighty waters as he
passes upon his triumphal march through Ohio |
the very birds sing the praises of this hero of
five hundred battles in all of which he lost a |
leg"
"Why, men, said Rip, "there wuzn't that |
many battles fit"
.sWhat do you know about soldierin' ?" asked |
Bill, savagely. "Now my friends, let's git up a |
military parade that will strike awe into the |
craven hearts of the Republican hosts. Let's |
show 'em the stuff that military chieftains are |
made Of"
"Look yer!" said Cardinal John. "I don't
know much about soljers. I've seed picters Nv
thet wun Bob Lee in Busters
office, but don't know much about 'em. Whar
did Rice servc-which army?"
t'The Union ar"
% the Republican party!' screamed the
Cardinal. "I1l never hev anything to do with
a d Lincoln hirelin'!" and John lit out.
Adam the Stubborn arose and said:
"Ef this mans a Lincoln hirelin', q John
Brown raider won't hev nothin' to do with
him. 1 thought he fit on the Dimocrat side!''
And Adam was about to leave when the Col.
him to believe that Rice had been
of the Rebel armies, when
Adam at once felt Abel to "raise Cain' for the
'Dimocrat' ticket. These fellows always get
mixed up, when they go to talking about their
military exploits.
Then Bandy the Short thought he had good
idea.
my frents,' said Bandy, pleeve we peter
list fall in, tie whole Syndicate, a military
pody, an march to de Fair Ground. Eferypody
could see py our pearance dat We vas military
Feterans. Me an Long Tom will march toged-
ier-Rip an te Tall Butternut-Cardinal Shon
ln' te eColonel-Spike-nose an Lewis tie Sleepy
tie Howart an Isaac te Slim, an SO on. 1t
would make an imposih' military parade"
This plan was unanimously adopted. The
dea was, to revive the old military spirit. So
t was arranged that the Syndicate should es-
,ort Rice to the Fair Fround. But it was dis
covered that the Learned Shoemaker had to
make financial speech in the country, and
Blrster had to make temperance speech, and
march into town with his class the next day.
So it was resolved that regiment Of infantry
be reruited, next day, as an escort-and there
was nothing but infantry about it. The syndi-
cate was represented in the procession, by
Spike-nose and Brick. Things do not work
smoothly for ihe Syndicate. 1t begins ID look
as though there were too many leaders for the
amount of following.