The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1879-06-25
WHOLE NO. 1859.
Your charge against Mr.. Barker,
the artist here said the magistrate.
''is assault and battery, believe n
HNoo e;- ~

the artist here,n said the magistrate.
"is assault and battery, | believe y''
"Yes, sir"
"And your name is
"Potts, am art critic of the
Weekly Spy"
"State your case"
IL called at Mr. Barker's studio
upon his invitation to see bis great
picture, just finished, Of George
Washington cutting down the cherry
tree with bis bstchet.' Mr. Barker
was expecting to sell it 70 Congress
for $50. 900. He asked me what |
thought of it, aud after / pointed
out his mistake in making the handle
of tie hstchet twice as thick as The
tree, and in turning the head of tie
Ratchet around so that George was
cutting the tree down with the ham
mer end, asked him why be fore
shortened Georges leg so as to make
it look as if bis left foot was on the
mountain on the other side OF he
river"
"Did Mr.. Barker take it kindly ?n
asked the justice
"Well, be looked little glum that's
all. And then when | asked him
why be puE guinea pig up in the
tree with horns, he said it was not q
guinea pig, but a COW, and that il
was not 10 the tree, but in the back
ground Then | said that il | had
been painting George Washington /
should not have given hin the COM
plexion Of salmon brick; | should
not have given him two thumbs on
each hand, a0d should have tried
not to slew his right eye around so
that be could see around the back OF
his head to bis iefs ear. And Bar
ker said oh, wouldn't YOU 2" Sarcas-
tic, your honor. Aud / said 10, |
wouldn't, and 1 wouldn't have paint
ed oak leaves on cherry.trees, and |
wouldn't have left the spectator in
doubt as to wh ether the figure of BY
the woods was factory chimney, or
a steamboat, or George Wasbington's
father taking smoke"
(Which Of the three was il ~ ask.
ed tbe magistrate
II don't knew. Nobody will ever
know. So Barker asked me what /
thought he'd better do And ! told
him thought his best c54ace vas TO
abandon the Washing, ida aad
6x the thing up someao y lie the
boy who stood on the baraIgS deck
| told him he might pa !, tue grass
red TO represent the Ian =. aDl daub
over the trees eos il we look ike
the mast, and pull doe4 George's
foot 10 tie other side Of thr river
SOS it would rest some op the burn
ing deck; and maybe he ght -cja-
siruct that factory china, o tat
ever it was, aud make it t-r captain,
while be could arrange the guinea
pig so ss to do for the captains
dog"
did be agree z''
Tic said she idea dida's'Ss-ike hin.
So then | suggested that he might
turn ii into Columbus discover 2
America, Let George stand for c.
Iumbas and the tree bs Turned iuto .
native, and the hstches made % an
ever for flag, while the moaEtain
in The background would answer FOR
tie rolling bilIcws CT the ocean He
said he'd be hanged ifit should So
| mentioned tha: perhaps it might,
pass for tie execution Of Mary Queen
Of Scots Pat George in black for
headsmsa. tend over the tree and
pu; frU,E < on it for Mary, lei the
haic5et stand and work in the guia-
es pig and factory chimney a. mourn
ers. But Barker said somebody
would be worse hurt than Mary
Queen Of Scots e I kept on"
"Didn': Ike il, hey!"
II s'pose not And | said that
while 1 did not want 20 force my sd-
vice upon him. | would say. if ny
opinion vas asSed, that the bes; hope
of that picture woul1 be to make il
representative Of the deluge Bald
in an ark around George, put a shirt
on him and call him Noah, crowd in
other animals with the guinea pig,
let the factory chimney DO for Mt
Arsrst, sBd the tree for the stove
pipe projecting from the roof Of the
ark Just ss | bad t3e word oat Of
nv mouth, Barker Knocked me clean
through The picture Ny head tore
oat Washington uesg leg. sad ny
right leg carried Sway fur miles Of
the river. We had IL over and over
on TIE Hoor for e~bile, and dnally
Barker whipped arr going TO take
ia~ ~ aim il TIE interest Of justice I
sad high arr
So Barker was bound over, and
Nf Potts weoi Goa . Toe Office Of /
the Spy" TO write up MS criticism.
Max Adeier "a m Nsr lGrk
BIsesiY