The Leavenworth weekly times. [volume] (Leavenworth, Kan.) 1870-1880, 1879-09-18
LITTLE OF EVERYTHING.

England may whip somebody sometime
if she keeps on going TO war.
Rev. J. p. Thompson says it was merely
clerical error.
The British lion even wishes tina, he
were dead.
The Democratic voters were doubtless
intimidated by Gail Hamilton's scalp
knife.
Mr.. Fields trouble appears to be that
Tilden is bigger stock swindler han he il.
Gov. Colquitt, OF Georgia, is preaching
at csmpmeetings throughout the State.
The Afghans, as we'll az Beacons6el5,
are in favor OF "a spirited foreign policy
Mr.. Tilden is still confident that he can
carry New York, with the exception of
Cyrus W. Field
Mr.. Tilden's barrel has heard the news
from Blaine, and its bunghole wears a sad
and melancholy expression.
Gen. Peauregard is interested in a ces
machine, the gas of which is supplied by
the General himself.
Csrlotta Patti has cork leg, and that is
the one which her new husband requests
her to kick with.
Significant remark OF Thomas Ewing on
hearing the news from Maine: "O1ch ~
Scion Chasei5 Maine Greenback party
has evidently gone to meet Hans Briet-
mans.
The first French version of Charles
Lambs Essays Of Ella" is soon to appear
in Paris.
Kate ClaIton has a new, real baby of
her own for the play Of "The Double Mar
riage."
If Mr.. Evarts would like to see Mormon
ism suppressed he had better send it to
Georgia.
Nilsson is thirty-two. As this statement
has been made for nearly d doz N years, it is
doubtless correct.
Don't waste your rotten eggs. The editor
of the Okolona Sites is going to lecture
through the West.
Mr.. Field certiies that there's another
million in Uncle SsmTs bari. L. that the
wav to crush him OUT
Mrs. DeLand says it's a shameful lie,
and Mrs. DeLsnd ought to know the facts.
Gen. Hood left nothing but his children.
not be contested.
Kalloch is said to resemble the late Brig
ham Young. Unfortunately he is not SO
dead" adds DeYoung.
General Ord is having me.eoric sword
made from a mass of iron which fell in
Mexico while he was there.
The sun, flower begins to rattle in the
breeze as q warning that Summer il post
poned till another year.
"Mamma, can't we have anything we
want ?" "Yes, my dears. But be careful
and don't want anything you can't have"
Prisoner, you have committed fright
full murder; at seventeen you have COM
mitted an atrocious crime which ranks you
with Chastine Cox and the Italian BARRIERS.
The prisoner modestly )-Sorr, ye father
me,
Better lay in your coal now. Professor
Schaffer, Of Pottsville, in q lecture before
the Society for the Advancement of Science,
says the anthracite coal fields will be ex-
hsusted 10 the year 2065.-Philadelph ia
Chronicle.
Joe Cook is at Ticonderoga ciphering cut
the reason Why the unknowable preponder-
aDce Of the luminous ego causes the heter-
ogeneous infnity of the deplorsble bioplss:
to give way before the laughter of the soul
at isseif-S,. Albans Advertiser.
The bell-punch Is generally supposed to
be modern invention, but it was evident
ly in use in Macbeth's time, from the fact
that he says: Go bid thy mistress, when
my drink is ready, che strike upon the
bell. "-Boston Commercial Bulletin.
1t was in Bolton, Bell county, Texas.
He got out in front of Embree & Keys
store, and offered reward SIS for Texas
lieutenant. It was all in vain. Every man
present ranked as major, colonel, or gen.
erai, except the judges.-[New Orleans
Times.
The agricultural interest. Landlord Ito
tenant Who has given up farming at the
end OF his lease, 70 await better times)-
well, Jackson. how do you like living on
your capital!" Farmer-"Not too we'll,
my lord; bat find it cheaper than letting
You live On i'll London Punch.
an the fourth place" said the preacher
to hn drovsy audience, chose Of you Who
azs swaks win soeics"-ssc. Th.s vas
pans, . aAdn sezaieAteaing up Of almost
OVWybu3Y 4 - 0011R1Rnfiom nd 4 -.