The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1879-04-29
Grandpa Browns Brown Cow.


she had habit OF making herself very dis
agreeable in fly time. Her age was con-
sdcrably past that which is allotted to ami
mails of her kind, one Of her horns was
straight, and the other crumplcd, like
that Of the animal described in "Thc house
that Jack built"
She was an exceedingly nervous creature.
She would not submit to provocaliou with
out proper resentment. In other words,
whoever attempted to milk her had to be
very gentle about it or he would find her
heels flying in Il very uncomfortable man
ncr about his head.
She gave an abundance of very rich milk,
for which reason Grandpa Brown did not
sec fit to dispose Of her, and SO she remain
cd in his possession for many years.
One Sabbath afternoon Uncle James went
out to do the milking. The flies were very
thick in the barnyard, and, upon attempt
ing to milk tho brown COW, he found her
very nervous and uneasy. lie had just
succeeded in getting comfortably seated upon
the milking stool, when cold Brownie"
as wc were accustomed to call her, struck
him a sharp blow in the eye with her
stumpy tail.
After rubbing his eyes moment, Uncle
James commenced milking, but soon re-
ccivcd another rap that fairly made his
head ring
"So!" he yelled impaticntly. The old
COW bounded away to the other side Of the
yard.
Uncle John stood by, M interested spec
tator of the scene.
"Don't be rough with her, Jim, )" he said.
"Rough!" exclaimed Uncle James, with
an exhibition of much feeling, ''lct her hit
you in the head with that old tail of hers
and see how you'd feel"
"Givc me the pail" said Uncle John,
with an air of one who knows what he is
about; 'I'll milk her. / never have any
trouble"
lie took the phil from Uncle James hand
and approached "Old Brownie" who
pricked up her cars and regarded him ap-
provingly.
Uncle John seated himself upon the stool,
pushed up his coat sleeves, and commenced
milking.
"Therc," he said, 'T have no trouble.
It's the easiest thing in the wor--Confound
your old brown hidc!"
The latter portion of his speech was d.
rccted to the old COW, who struck him saw
agcly In the mouth with her restless, stumpy
tail.
uncle James laughed.
Uncle John proceeded with the milking.
Another whack from the stumpy tail of
"Old Brownie"
"IIold Oh there" yelled Uncle John.
The next moment the milkpail was over
turned, and Uncle John found himself
sprawling upon the ground, while "Old
Erownc" stood regarding him from an op-
positc corner of the yard with al expression
Of pleased wonder.
"Boys," shouted Grandpa Brown, who
had been looking from tho other side of the
barnyard gate, "why can't you never larn
to be gentle"
lie opened the gate and came into the
yard.
"Fetch the stool and pail here" hc said
patiently; III never have any trouble with
her. So boss-so-so-so."
Grandpa Brown put himself rcsolutcly to
work; ''thc milk began to flow and stream
into the huge tin pail.
"Whisk," went the stumpy tail, and
Grandpa Browns Sunday hat went dancing
across the yard.
"Soboss- s-so-so-so," he said patiently.
Hc received another severe blow upon
the nose.
"so,. 80, so, he said, soothingly. 'tBoys,
you scc IL JUST as tOlu you. lncTcS 10
trouble at all about milking this COW, If
you only-So, 80, 3d." he received another
whack, on the top Of his bald head, from
her remarkable tail.
eyes" continued he, "aftcr this, do just
as do-so |" he suddenly shouted as that
abbreviated tail knocked his false teeth half
way across the barnyard.
| A pair Of heels were unexpectedly pre-
scnted against him; and he found himself
sprawling upon tho ground with the milk
from tho pail streaming over his person.
When he arose hc was pitiful object to be-
hold, his Sunday clothes were ruined, his
face was purple with passion. Selling the
thrcc-legged stool, hc hurled 1t at "Old
Brownie" with all his strength. 1t struck
her squarely upon the shoulder, and shc
was soon skipping about the yard upon
three legs.
"You old rip" said Grandpa Brown,
''you shall be sold tomorrow"
| And che was.
An old married couple live at Wes-
ton, Conn. They are Mr.. Zalmon
Stur0ea who Ia O8 yeara of apa and