The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1879-10-14
a Model Policeman.

A sick woman was walking along street
up town week ago when u burly fellow
ran up and took her pocket-book from her.
She grabbed him by the collar and cried
help and thief, when he turned around and
knocked her down with terrible blow IN
tho face. A policeman stepped up and
said:
"My friend, don't you know it is very
wrong to act In SO unmanly manner.
Arc you not aware of the fact that man
should always yield to the influence of the
gcntlcr sex, and never be guilty of such an
act as that which you have just COM
mittcd?"
"What arc you giving mc?" gruntcd the
thief sullenly.
"Good advice; there, that lady IS almos>
inscnsiblc, and you are the cause of it. You
should go Immediately and apologize to her,
give her back her pocket and be diff
fcrent kind of man."
The thief glared upon him like an infu
riatcd demon, when he continued:
"Havc you studied etiquette much?"
"No, haint."
"Wcll, that's against you. If you had
studied etiquette and were familiar with the
usagcs of good society, and were up in art,
music and the drama, and had some know
ledge of ancient and modern literature and
were patron Of feather footed Tcrpsi-
chorc, you wouldn't do such thing as
strike poor dcfcnsclcs woman"
"Givc us rest"
He turned to walk aw ay, when the police
man said:
"Will you kindly take my arm and walk
TO the station house with mc?"
"Nary time"
"Ah, then you perhaps desire mo to
charter q coupe. I'll just stop the first one
that comes along; and we'll take nico rc-
frcshing ride together" "
81 amt goin' with you at ALL" beloved
the thief"
"You'rc not2"
"No l amt"
"Have you no spirit of courtesy in your
Is your soul not fired with the love Of gen
tility2 Come now, I'll take your arm and
we'll wander off
The thief hauled off and knocked the
policeman down. The latter jumped up,
wiped the blood off his face and said:
els this the proper thing to do to gen
tleman3"
The thief let his left out in pretty lively
style, and the boy in blue once more meas
urcd himself on the ground.
"Sir, must ask Jou TO refrain from
this kind of business. I'm not used to ii,
and am now probably too much disligurcd
to appear on the street."
The thief then trippcd him, and put his
foot into his mouth. They struggled around
for some time, until tho policeman managed
to uct the mans foot out Of his mouth and
to remark:
"1'his is very ungcntlcmanly, Pm sure.
In all my experience with the human fami-
ly, think you are the most vicious MEM
her have yet had the pleasure of meeting.
Just lot mo spit out fow boot nails and
mud before you put your foot back in my
mouth"
The thief then grnspcd him by tho feet
and dragged him over to the inside edge of
the walk to drop him over on Il heap of
sharp stones, which lay about twelve feet
below. AS they got to the edge the pick
pocket trippcd, and they rolled down to-
gcthcr. After they struck the stones the
cop murmmcd:
you over with me. / can assure you my
most dear and amiablc sir, that ii was not
intentional on my part. l hope you arc
not dangerously injured. Just get up and
let nc brush the dust off your clothes, and
then when We get to the next corner will
replace your bontonicrc.
When he commenced tho operation Of
brushing him off the man let fly and drop
ped him again.
"Wcll, now, this ls very unlsind, am
sure. This is more than cxpcctcd.'
IL got up and made gracious bow, and
said
"Wor't you kindly 10 with nc ?"
"No, / WON'T
"Not at my most earnest soicitatlon2' y
"No."
VERY we'll; you're the most disoblging
man / ever met. shall now have to walk
around the block. Good day, sir, I trust
we may have the pleasure of meeting
again. BE sure and remember what told
you regarding etiquette"
Aud the policeman climbed un the bank
and went on his way