The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1879-06-24
A STORY.
Written Especially for the Ladies.

young vile nOied-or thought she noted,
No doubt it WAS = fancy-a change. A.
time passed ou, IL becxase still uss,se sppar.
ent. Her husband wss loving, IL cOUs.e.
but somehow there Wan lack Oi the old
srdor, there Was falling of of the old
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. This troubled hrr, and,
woman like. she Was qnick To conclude that
his love far her had cdOled. One evening,
after thinking the M utter over all hay, siae
broke out with, "iou dom't love s,se any
more" "Whal makes You think sO?' he
asked. in . business like way, scsrcr lifting
HE eyes from the hook he WAS reading.
"Because," she soLt'ed, "you never pet me
any more, and you are MT half 40 attentive
~ you used to i,e." Then she broke down
into regular cry. The husband szw that
something must be done. Laying aside his
book and regrcifully laying aside his cigar
"A man does hate Ia be dislus bed when he
is once settled for the evenimg-he went u
his weeping wife, aud led her 10 the win
dow. my dear" Re said. ''do you see that
horse car cunning up the avenue" 81 ID"
she sObi,ed. "And do YOU nee that man
running TO catch ity' AYES. dear. Whist Of
it?" "And do you see that he il siraining
every nerve; that he il shouting To the
conductor at the top Of his VOICE. and doing
his hest to make the car siOpy" Il do"
said the wife, whose curiosity was aroused,
"but what on earth has that to do" '-One
moment, my dear. L.Uk again. Do yOu
observe that he has caught the car, and
that he il no longer running. but il proba-
bly, quietly seated inside taking . sest7
He has got through shouting and running,
because he has caught the car. NOW, ny
dear, at this point he kissed away her
teans.-'it II jnst 40 with me. have
caught the car" And with that the self
satisfied monster led his wife back TO her
seat ON the sofa and silently resumed his
easy chair, cigar and book.
Yes, that's always the way. Well, now
this Is the way he done when he capghl the
scar:
He grasped the portal handle,
And on the stand she gaily net
The family burning candle.
He placed his arm around her waist;
She smiled In condesscensiOn,
And then. snd then. and then, and thea
The rest needn't mention.
NJ, there's no use to mention il. The
result is already told above. Well. II wasn'l
very long after this before this same ''dear
hubby" bought his "deary" couple Of bot
ties Of patent medicine. lie did, and when
the dealer came TO him and wanted rec
he gave him the following
letter:
"DEAR Sir Two months since my vile
could scarcely speak. She has taken iwO
bottles Of your Life Remover and nov she
can't speak at all. Please send me two
more bottles. / wouldn't be without IT,"
That WAS \ pretty good recommsnti.iio ion.
Well. his wife. before long, recovered her
vsice. During the time he had moved eat
in the country and becam. = granger. He
was cotchea by the police and one of them
came UP and told us al! about il, A. follow ::
About s O'clock yesterday morning, y
man whose form Wss full II wrinkles, twists
and kinks. crawied out of an N. r. ispx car
and began yawning and rubbing his eyer
like one who had put On heavy night. A
policeman Ioungei that way, gave the man
. looking over and asked
"Sleep in there last night? ?"
"Y-a-a-s. diDsier." WAS the reply.
"LOOking for work ?"
"N-n-O, not exactly"
"Yon'li l,e run in il you hang around in
this way" remarked the officer.
81 dunno exactly what I'm going 10 do
! did live out here about eight miles, but
I've separated from the old woman. Yes.
seDSrated on circus day"
whats the trouble?"
"Waa!, she was my first and vas her
second, and We never got along any TOO
sweet. We. both ri IN. think We know il
all. and neither feels like giving in. We
come in to see the circus"
"Ah, yOu did ?"
"And that's where the separation tock
in front of the sacred hyenas
from japan. You know they advertised M
electric light lhere?"
"Yes."
swell, we'd never seen one When We
got into the menagerie, there stood the ele-
phsnt. Then came the cAmels. Then We
came to a dsrned old hear. Further on
were the lions AMI tigers and monkeys, hat
no electric light. W. walked three times
that old tent without coming Ia his
age. and got mad. Saws u one of the
:h.ps over the rope: 'Whar' in thunder il
The cage with electric light in? We want
% ere him or have Onr money mack ? The
etler he grOanesi all over, and lots IL folks
afed right out, and tiny wife she 6ew ~
md said I'd made foil Of myself How p
Jays (. why. the electric light II not an
animal at ALL said sine. hut il has some
hing to do with the clown We had big
az right there. She cavei NV hat in. and
broke her psrasol. and then separated"
Sand you won't make upT
snake up! Never! She can take the
electric light and bske and eat him. hut
['m man who never crawls! I'm going
o Kansas City, l am, and by this time 70
Ill he drunker'n hon~ew
"And you didn't rec the electric light af.
er all ~
"No! don't believe they had any
Maybe they thought they could work that
IRE rhinOceros of on the public by another
,ame, but ] tumkled in . mint. I'm an
id rhinos myself, and nv wife Is another,
md when think of hov I stOod there and
ct her call me foil af0re al the people
I'M mad 'nnf to walk clear home and pisen
Ter half of the yoke Of 0xen"
But you ace he didn't do il. Well tell
on Why. He got up from thss ere pl.c.
md dropped into the nearest saloon. He
idn't have very much money. but that
idn't make much difference. Everybody
n the saloon set 'em ~" and BY daylight
ext morning that fellow Vas seen running
n the direction Of Kansas City ss such
ime - Dexter never thought Of and before |
hitch locomotive would turn pale, and
t each step he yelled "Hic. Lord. take 'eu |
6w You rec scientisis find small repi lies /
a whisky, and thess doubtless grew 70 IN
normous size and hogan crawling up our |
eros back. This wasn't what be prom.
ed the preacher to "love, cherish and pro-
ct" Infsc', he didn't have any protection.
Ie just scooted along the road. II You II
o to the Temperance folks they'll tell you
ur hero was served right, bus ne know
ritter. Next morning he s,sDed 4 temper.
nee pledge and re are vonderine vherp