The Valley Virginian. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1865-1895, 1879-03-20
Washington's Views Of Love.
A LETTER TO MISS CUsTIs, HIS WAR,

A LETTER TO MISS CUSTIS, HIS WARD.
| Mr.. B. J. Losing, in letter in the Phila
delphia Weekly Times, prints letter writ
ten in January, 1895, by George Washing
ton to Eleanor Parke Custis,a grand -daugh
ter Of Martha Washington and his adopted
daughter. In this he gives her the following
advice on the subject of love
"Men and women feel the same inclination
to each other now that they always have
done. and which they will continue to do I'm.
til there is a new order of things, and you.
as others have done, may find perhaps, that
the passions of your sex are easier raised
than aliayed. Do not, therefore, boast toe
soon or too strongly Of your insensibility to,
or resistance of, its powers. In the compo-
sitlon of the human frame there is q good
| deal OF inflammable matter, however dormant
it may lie for time, and, like an intimate
acquaintance OF yours IA sister just married.,
| when the torch is put to it, that which is
| within you may burst into blaze; for which
reason, and especially, too, as have enter.
ed upon the chapter Of advices, will read
you lecture drawn from this text.
"Love is said to be an involuntary passion
| and it is therefore commended that it cannot
be resisted. This is true in part only, for
like all things else, when n0urished and sup
piled plentifully with aliment, it is rapid in
its progress; but let these be withdrawn and
it may be stified in its birth or much stinted
in its growth. For example, a woman (the
same may be said of the other SEX all beau
tiful and accomplished, will, while her hand
| and heart are undisposed Of, turn the heads
| and set the circle in which she moves on fire.
Let her marry, land what is the consequence?
| The madness ceases and all is quiet again.
Why? Not because there is any diminution
in the charms of the lady, but because there
is ian end OF hope. Hence it follows that
love may and therefore ought to be under
the guidance of reason; for although we can
not avoid first impressions, we may assured
ly place them under guard; and my motives
for treating on this subject are to show you,
while you remain Eleanor Parke Gusts,
and retain the resolution to love with mod
GRAFTON, the propriety of adhering to the lat
ter resolution, at least until you have secured
your game and the way by which it may be
accomplished.
"When the fire is beginning to kindle and
your heart grows warm PROFOUND these
questions to it: Who is the invader? Have
a competent knowledge of him? Is he
man of character, man of sense? For, be
assured, sensible woman can never be
happy with fool. What has been his walk
in lifes Is he a gambler, spendthrift or
drunkard? Is his fortune sufficient to MAIN
tain me in the manner I have been accus-
toned to live and my sisters do live? And
is he one to whom my friends can have no
reasonable objection? Ii these interroga-
tories can be satisfactorily answered there
will remain but one more to be asked
That, however, is an important one. Have
[ sufficient ground to conclude that his at
fections are engaged by me? Without this
the heart of sensibility will struggle against
passion that is not reciprocated- delicacy,
custom, or call it by what epithet you will
having precluded all advances on your
part.
''The declaration, without the most indi-
rect invitation OF yours, must proceed from
the man to render it permanent and valua-
BILE, and nothing short of good sense and an
easy, unaffected conduct can draw the line
between prudery and coquetry. 1t would be
no great departure from earth to say that it
rarely happens otherwise than that thor
ough paced coquette dies in celebacy as
for her attempts to mislead 9TH
ers. by encouraging looks. words or action,
given for no other purpose than to draw
men on to make overtures that they may be
rejected