The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1879-08-14
MULTUM IN PARVO.

to Choice, s25O@4.75.
MULTUM In PARvO.
A MIRROR is the only tolerated reflec
ton upon the beauty of woman. 90
Isn't it queer that q man can 30
nothing when he can't see anythingr
The cherry pie is arrived. III
true tits pity, pitv tits 49,
DON'T be too severe on your painter
Remember he is but hue-mati.-Toa
kers Statesman.
The fellow made q bad bull when h,
went to steal squash and got gourd
Boston Transcript.
WHEN you try to wind up a watcl
with a key that won't fit, you realiz,
how hard it is to get grip on the fleet
ing hours.
The foreign silk crop has failed, bu
the home demand hasn't. Husband!
and fathers, you have our sympathy
Chicago Evesing Journal.
NEVER believe q man who is alwav.
telling what he used to do, who alwav.
deals with the past tense; for the past
tense is pre-tense.-Bostos Transcript
LOUIS KossUTH says that there arr
only two countries in Europe where the
word "home'' is thoroughly under.
stood, namely, England and Hungary.
No MATTER how bad and destructive
boy may be, he never becomes so de-
graded or loses his self-respect suf1i-
GENTLY to throw mud on circus poster.
To DYsPErTIC: We believe all the
recognized medical authorities agree
that you cannot impart tone to the
stomach by swallowing jewsharp.-
Albany Evening Journal.
"LANDLADY," said he "the coffee is
not settled" "No," she replied; s.but
it comes as near it as your last months
board bill does;" and that man never
spoke again during the meal.-Syracuse
On W Times.
"WHEN l wath little boy" lisped
very stupid society man to a young
lady, {" all my ideath in life were them
tered on being clown" "Well, there
is at least one case of gratified ambi-
tion," was the reply.
A GERMAN radical philosopher has
said that a man is what he eats.
meaning that his body and his brain
are built up out of his food, and are,
therefore, coarse or fine, according to
what be takes into his alimentary
canal.
"pM Internally disguised with my
wife-that's the long and short of it. =
"What's wrong now? Has she been
kicking up any new capers?'' "No,
1 wouldn't stand that; but she keeps on
repeating all her old ones" parts
Newspaper.
THE man who pursues q course of
evil conduct with the expectation that
he will be able to avoid the conse-
quences may just as well tread on the
" business end of a copper tack' and
expect it not to inform him of tho fact,
IN. Y. Herald.
"A LONDON newspaper relates that
when a Frenchman, who fell overboard
from the steamer which took the Cob
den Club back from Greenwich, was
rescued and returned to the deck, the
first thing he courteously said was that
he hoped he had not kept the steamer
waiting.
A CAREFUL housekeeper puts new
wall paper on the front room in the
spring time rather than in the fall.
Miles young man never leans his
greasy back-hair against the wall in
the summer time, and the paper can
consequently be kept clean. The front
gate, you know.-Nes0 Haven Register.
A QUAINT writer says: 81 have seen
women so delicate that they were
afraid to ride a horse for fear of the
horse running away; afraid to sail, for
fear the boat might be upset; afraid to
walk, for fear they might fall; but l
have never seen one afraid to be mar
ried, which is far more riskful than ell
the others put together"
GIDEON Cook, a Baptist preacher,
was q man very eccentric in speech,
even to his last earthly moments. A
few hours previous to his death, his
brother, also a preacher, came to his
bedside and inquired, "Do you think
you are dying, Gideon?" And the
reply, sharp and quick, came, Don't
know-can't tell; never died."
A CORRESPONDENT wants to know if
wearing hat tends to make q person
bald. We believe it does. Women
don't wear hats and they are not bald,
at least they do not wear them on their
heads, and so they are not bald there.
Hats destroy hair. A woman's hat is
worn on the back of her head, and that
is the reason women have to buy so
much back hair.-Danbury Nesos.
A PARTY met at public table,
when the conversation turned on the
subjoot of tronornisI ation. MI. X. was
q firm believer in the doctrine, and was
largely upon its points,
when he was Interrupted by gentle
man who was present with, ok, what
do you suppose yourself to have been
before you were Kr' "I do not
know" replied K, 81 might have
been q pig, for aught l know"
SWELL" rejoined his friend, "you
have not altered much only got upon
your hind legs"
The curious question has come up
in Boston whether forged notes are
properly negotiable. The Boston Jour-
nal says: A real-estate transaction took
place on Wednesday, in which we are
informed eight thousand dollars worth
of the Edmunds forged. paper was
taken at q valuation. Of course, this
may be legitimate transaction, since
this paper will receive q dividend in
insolvency, but nevertheless it is not
often that such evidence of criminality
is passed from hand to hand, and in
some cases it would surely prevent the
law from having any power to punish
and check such crimes. And, then,
should such proof of guilt be nego-
tablet
Shocked and astonished old Dea-
con-. You bad and wicked boy, why
don't you take off your hat in the
House of the LordP'' Bad and wicked
boy Overcome with guilt-"H you
please, sir, I'm little girl"
ENGINEERS have been surveying q