The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1879-02-13
The Mysteries Of Skating Unfolded.

The Mysteries Of Skating Unfolded.
When the Times man entered the Ca
rondelet street skating rink the other
night, the band played its brassiest bray,
the lights winked suggestively, 1.-The
br-r-r-r-r-r-r-r of the skates increased in
volume four. fold, and his, heart beat
high with fondest anticipation of grace
and glory and gentle gyration to come.
Two or three minutes had elapsed be-
fore the cynical boy Gan, smiling, fiend-
Sishs youth who ministers at the skate
stand, had oiled up an extra slick pair
to that degree of unctious uncertainty
which should characterize the Plympton
in full bloom. Then the Times man
buckled them on; seated, on chair,
whence he could observe the foibles of
others, before displaying his prowess.
(Mem: II one thing in the world is
easier than another, it is to put on
blister or a pair of skates.) -
The scene was kaleidoscope. The
new beginners slid around the hall in
huge circles and numbers, while the
adopts Tipped fancifuly in the central
reserve. On chair opposite sat q noble
brOwed youth, under fun head Of proud
steam, wearing a beaver, and look of
determination. 81 He couldn't get his
skates on, quick enough, Fondly did
the blue-eyed angel beside him watch
the intricate operation, rs il confident
that he would eclipse all others in poetic
grace and skillful movement.
The last buckle was buckled. The
steely fire Of ambition lit his eye, and
he rose. q A small hut yiciousr brother, of
the young lady gave him q vigorous
! shove. Do1Out into the nAadly y-fushing
crowd he plunged, lit into three new
beginners and~a boy, clutching spas
medically at the treaeherous air, turned
back somersault, and then lay down
to form foundation for pyramid of
skaters, which was speedily formed
When the hard knot of legs and wild
ly waving arms had Become unraveled,
and the visage Of the youth once more
unveiled to the garish light, the look of
determination was ,gones and the SUBJ
dued mournful expression Of the new
beginner had taken place. The beaver
looked like it had been, in an, earth
quake, boiler explosion or something
and the matron tie was1 slewed around
suggestively under the Left ear.
q The Times man looked across at the
blue-eyed angel. She had risen, There
were traces Of hot tears yet dimming
the lovely orbs, but the ripe red lips
were compressed in withering scorn.
With one glance of annihilation toward
the shattered idol of her dream, she
caught up the vicious brother BY the
scruff of the coat and vanished. ~
The moment of moments had come
for the Times man. Selecting q time
when half dozen pairs of approving
eyes were turned in his direction, he
rose. The "long roll," he had been
taught, consisted of two gilderduke to
the right, semi-circular fabdab with
dexter, and periwiggle with the sinis-
ter hoof in the rear. He had been in
formed that this was. the simplest and
most peaceful movenentin skating. 30
the g long roll was essayed, s~ost
The following is Photographic
transcript of the first half minute fist.
Gilderfluke to the, right!-br-r-r-r-r!
I'd. aG-to the right! brlrlr-r-rLr! EFlab-
dab .br-r-r-r-Mpt Whang!7 sang-fang
biz z-rat-bang- g-koupf-br-r-whoof!
! !*!d* !* y! Then the most beautiful
astronomical visions fitted across the
Times, mans gaze, and he lay right
down to enjoy them. Somebody wis
,pered through the dark to inquire if he
was hurt. He whispered family that
after being embalmed, he would like to
be cremated--that was all. suIsIqns &
Somebody else. then took the skates
off and carried him back. Various
theories were indulged in. Some said
that the perimetersvalveof eof the left hand
skate, had broke loose. Others thought
that the diaphragm must have come un-
screwed. eMr. Ferguson, the proprietor,
whispered athat-hut, Mr.. Ferguson's
remarks shall not appear in these col
umns. 'EIf0 dsl7G't bHg sisac 1Ha
~. It is the easiest thing in the world to
skate. just watch Henry Levi, the
gold-medaI skater of the South, glide
backwards, forwards, ,sideways-the
picture Of grace in the poetry of motion.
Nothing could be simpler The flabdab
is the only, really difficult thing in the
business, he says. When once the fab
dab is mastered, the genuine, double
convex Ffabdab, the rest is nothing.
Gilderfukes, periwiggles, .hobgibbles
and orangliftifs all come easy after the
fabdab-sd 1gf mi s7ar Ags19 agif
The Times man comedies with medi-
cal men in the opinion that Skating Is a
wonderful aid 10 muscular development.
After leaving the rink, he did not feel in
the least like sitting down Aeven eat his
supper off the mantelpiece. NeW Or
leans Times.
WHAT do I remind YOU'D most?'
essid he.o5 "a French clock, 'i'seid she.
Puzzled, and with q slight. misgivirg,
a. r.x< j.sn ,.,o% ~ a<<sI %L~k 49, ~rI