The New York herald., 1879-02-10
SOCIAL ETIQUETTE OF NEW YORK,

SOCIAL ETIQUETTE OF NEW YORK,
The dainty little volume on the etiquette Of polite
society in New York ID. Appleton & Co) is not with
out certain value in that it affords the opportunity
for the discussion of social topics, not ordinarily
trenched upon serious standpoint either by
the press by other media 1t cannot be denied
that in the absence Of any aristocracy of tle the
subject Of the and customs OF society the
American metropolis is one of some interest when
seriously considered by observer familiar by
tact with the usages that prevail in fashionable
circles. The author OF the volume, which under
takes to give shape and substance to the hitherto
unwritten social code of New York, take be Of
the genter and beyond this may add that the
book shows q closeness Of observation and minute
attention to detail tina. bespeaks the writer's thor
ough familiarity with the subject. both in theory
and practice. That considerateness kindliness and
all the gracious courtesies underlie and support all
the artificial forms of social culture the author
recognizes, and does not hesitate to read pointed
lessons to those pretenders to gentle breed
ing who assume a virtue if they have it not.
1t evident from the careful perusal Of the tenets
laid down in 'social Etiquette that cuipable Of
fences according to the 'code," frequently
mtted, and that people sometimes innocently
naughty when designing to be "nice.'' Now. the
passing salutation Of lady with whom one is out of
favor is delicate matter that undoubtedly requires
the most delicate adjustment Of social rules. Says
our manual on this point:--
There may be circumstances whom o gentleman
may lift his hat to passing lady, even though he
cannot bow to her. She may be offended with him,
and yet he may respect and feel kindly toward her.
He may deserve her disregard and it is permitted
him to express his continued reverence by uncover
ing his head III her but he has right TO
look ut her as she passes him. He must drop his
eyes. e. ras tA.l
What would be the fearful penalty If he who. under
the ban Of dspeasurc yet dared to raise his eyes with
pleading glance toward the fair face Of the offended
one the author fails to state. The author does afford
the reader some solsce however to the exactions
OF the fair sex when gentleman il In the saddle.
Under these trying circumstances cordial bow"
or the Lifting of the hat touching its rim with
his whip" il he be caracoling down the avenue. sat.
isfes the most oxacting OF ladies.
Some sensible suggestions as to gift-making at
wedding anniversaries are included In the vol
ufne:- .t.
The value of gift has come to be measured by
persons of delicacy by the motive which prompted
is bestowai and there is decidedly serious effort
being made by our refined and influential leaders of
society to escape from an unplcasantness that may
be suffered equally by the giver and the receiver OF
formal presents.
Nothing within the proper scope of manual Of
etiquette seems to have been neglected. With the
young rosebuds just blooming into fragrant flowers
Of society this epitome of Fashions will doubt
less prove as inseparable . companion was the
Complete Letter Writer to past generation, while
older heads will find not little that is diverting
to the provoking OF tho rsibles in the earnest
nsistance of the author upon absolute difference to
the finest points Of the 'scodc."