The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1879-07-12

OTIS very singular, Internally singular"
unused DR.. Bloggers tie other day. "Whats
siugular?" asked another cemetery en-
larged. tWhy, you know old Mrs. Skim
son? Well, forty-hve years ago she ran
needle into her foot, and" EXACTLY,
and to-day" put in the other, cit came out
OF her elbow, suppose" "No, it didn't.
1t came out OF the back OF her grandson's
head. That is what beats me-"
"I say, you fellows have got queer no.
ton OF punctuatioD," shouted an uptown
man to an ice.cart driver. "What makes
YOU put period after every word on the
side OF your cart?'' "Oh that's cause
we have to stop so often" There was a
degree Of GOODNESS in the reply that was un-
cxpectedly refreshing to the INQUIRER
Ne,o Hduen Register.
A young poet writes and asks il we will
accept tolerably long poem. OF course we
will Write it on whole sheet OF foolScap,
and don't cut the paper. We have another
stove to take down, and we want just such
size sheet to paste over the hole where we
take the pipe out.-Keotuk Consultation.
Among the breezy incidents at the Island
last week enjoyed by the group who heard
it wss the delight expressed by an excur-
sionlst from Connecticut at first hearing
some OF the airs from "Pinafore." "By
gum!" he exclaimed, "that music's eZ
sweet ez cream !''-Brooklve Union.
The new apartment-house recently built
in New York for bachelors has plenty OF
closet-room, which seems to be waste.
What does 4 man want OF closets so long as
he does not have a wife to forbid bis keep
ing things in the middle Of the floor?
There was case not very long time
since where it became necessary to draw 4
cork, and the only one present Of a large
party having a pocket-corkscrew was q cler-
gyman. He remarked that he used it to
open ink-botties.-BoSton transcript.
Extract from French feuilleton "This
blow was too much for the poor Count,
whom SO many emotions had broken down:
he fell with his face upon the earth some
instantS aiter Domingo had finished his re.
cital. When he arose he had ceased to live"
De CasSagnac seems to be French edi-
ton OF Kearney. He called the Govern
ment "the scum Of towards and Wretches.''
But that doesn't sound SO badly in French.
Cincinnati Commercial
1t is hailed as the harbinger Of better
times that this year YOU occasionally hear OF
man who thinks OF going into some other
business besides that OF looking after an Of
fice.--Qaincy Modern Argo.
This fair land has two distinct sectional
diseases. Baseball is making sad inroadsl
In the solid North, but thus far this season
the solid South has been spared yellow
fever HhitehaH Times. $50
Ben. Butler Ia trying to obtain the Demo- |
cratic nomlpation for Governor OF xassa- |
chnsetts, and the Democrats are 40skins |
over their almanacs to see II 1t is BNtiers
year to- be q Democrat. - Peck . Saa.
There Is one thing that is greatly to st,e
credit Of a. tailor. and Which places NM 10
the foremost rank OF natures nooleuieu,
and that Is he minds his SEWN Business. |
-Hackensack; Republican.
Picnic baskets are now piethorlc VITA
castiron dough.nuts, basssqood cheese, DO |
ogDa and hard boiied eggs, pleasantly sue-
gestive OF fun, frotfc; and nocturnal cholic.
Ctteago Commercial Advertiser.
The ,washwoman Of to-day hangs shirt
OF, the line Just the way a4washwoman did |
when ancient Troy Was In her glory. Hah I
the world really advanced any Detroitft
Ere Press. Il. Il.
ssJne kind Of ship always steer clear
Of, nns iaiGi and old bachelor sea- captain,
q ahd that.s epMrtship; cause. on that ship
there's always two mates and no cap 81. q
handsome, sWeetiy-dressed, raHnsd. a
liid altogether aptiyating young man, who
has been dssei1g with halt The bellies OF
NEW Orledn3S turns cut To- be 81 cool. 80 4