The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1879-11-30
Ny Wife's Relations.

aBroiled spring chicken for tea, eh?'
said 1. "And lobster salad and friet
oysters! Upon my word, this looks a,
if we were going to have company"
$50 we are, my dear" said my wife
looking a little guilty, as she polished
up the surface of the big silver t~eatray
with a new channels leather. .'Thel
are all come to visit me-Uncle Silas
and Aunt Melicent, and the children.
and Cousin Joab, and the two Miss
Wilmerdings, and my Aunt Louisa, tc
meet the Reverend Mr.. Speakwell,
from Minnesota, who married my sec.
ond Cousin, Jerusha Wilde. Speak.
well is troubled with the catarrh, and
he thinks of staying at our house for 8
few weeks, while he is being treated by
DIR. Dosem.'
1 put down my linen buster and
brown-paper parcels with some empha-
sis.
sob, confound the Rev. Mr.. Speak.
well..'' said l..
"John.- calculated my wife.
"Well, my dear, | can't help it" said
|. Its not in human nature to en-
dure everything. And I've been rela-
toned out of all patience ever since our
marriage. The Jenkinses went away
last week, the Birdsalls took an affec-
tionate leave yesterday, and nowjust as
was contemplating a peaceful even
ing by ourselves, here's a new swarm,
hungrier than the rest, just about to
settle down upon us! In my opinion,
Kitty, my dear, relations should be
abolished.n
81 am surprised at you, JOHN" said
my wife. MY own people, that are so
fond of me-"
There's where you are mistaken,
my DEAR y said l. sits your comfort
able spring beds and good cookery that
they are fond of, not you"
"Johnlu
I'D be willing to wager good round
sum on the truth of my assertion"
said l..
because you have no relations your
SELF
THANK Providence for thatl" said l,
deyoutly. 81 was reared in u found
ling asylum, and have nobody to thank
but myself for my tolerable success in
the world"
Its no reason you should find fault
with mine" said Kitty, with her bright
blue eyes full of tears. "And MI.
Speakwell is such a spiritually-minded
man, and dear Uncle Silas loves you
just as if you were his only son, and
Cousin Joab is SO interested in our chill
dren."
"I'm much obliged to EN-" said l
dryly. ''But 1 slept all last week on
soft cushions laid in the bath tub; and
we had fourteen people here over the
anniversaries; and l was obliged to give
up my own room for a month last win
ter to old Mr.. Manswell, not to speak
of our being half poisoned with Aunt
Louisa's hygeian messes in the fall.
When the poet said, There's no place
like home, L presume he meant when
there were no relations visiting. I'll
tell you what, my dear" with the sud-
den inspiration, s'Ive Il great mind
formally to deed w this house to your
relations, if they will agree solemnly to
leave me in peace for the rest Of my
life, wheresoever | may set up my fami-
ly tents"
up stairs and change your things, and
brush your hair, and get ready for tea.
They're all waiting III the best parlor,
and | was expecting your return to see
about hiring some cot beds from the
village hotel, to put up in the attic for
those four little Speakwell children.
You see, Aunt Louisa has the blue bed
room, and Cousin Joab sleeps in the
little wing-chamber, and Mr.. and Mrs.
Speakwell will have our room, and"
"Indeed!'' said l. "And we are to
sleep in the barn, l suppose?"
Don't be cross, John, said my wife,
appealingly. some must be hospitable,
you know. And | a easily make up
the sofa-bed in the back parlor for our
use, for a week or so."
l said nothing, but ground my teeth
in silent despair, as l sprang upstairs,
two steps at a time, to make what
changes 1 could in my toilet, by the aid
of a ten-by-twelve glass hung over the
washstand of Il stuffy little bathroom.
The Rev. Mr.. Speakwell was a big
man, with a still bigger voice, and a
limp, faded little wife, whose sole earth
ly interests seemed centered in her
four whIte-eyed, freckled-faced chill
dren. Uncle Silas and Aunt Melicent
were a silent couple, with excellent APP
petites, and two tall boys, who giggled
and snickered at each other in the in
tervals of the conversation.
Cousin Joab talked necessarily with
his mouth full, and the two Miss Will
lnerdings served as general echoes to
the rest; while Aunt Louisa devoured
| lobster salad ad libitum, and kept on
sending up her cup for more green tea,
until | trembled for her nerve
While my wife, careful and troubled,
like Martha of old, with many things,
Il 1--IrAl 1-l. - l--x ..tl Ahz lnn.