St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1879-03-28
Some Needless Asperities of Life

Some Needless Asperities OF Life.
BY MRS. MARGARET E. sANGsTER.
Somebody writing in an English mag,
azine said, the other day, that the diff,
ference between French and an Eng
lish home, of the better class, lies main
" in the manner in which each seeks
after its highest ideal excellence. In
the French household, joy, gaiety, mu-
tual entertainment and the diversion OF
all, are the objects pursued. In the
English, rest, leisure, the qualification
of individual tastes, and the further
ance of individual aims, are regarded
as chiefly important.
l have been thinking at what points
the average American home touches Ell
Their of these, and it seems to me not
unfair to conclude that, commonly, nei-
ther rest nor joy set themselves before
our families as desirable ends to be at
tanned. Success in life, material pros
perity, ambition in one Or another form,
our homes are merely convenient stop
ping places, to which we come jaded,
from which we go refreshed, as, like
campaigners in an enemy's country,
we wage the incessaut conflict against
opposing circumstances. Happily we
are gradually awakening to the fact
that in too much labor there may be
folly. And the new and generally diff
fused interest in household art is a
good and favorable sign of the times.
But the best of all household art is that
which consists in making the household
at ease and pleased with itself and its
members; and there are still chairs
waiting at many hearths for the genial
professors who shall teach its alphabet.
A home, especially here, where every
body possesses the means of making his
abode at least comfortable, and there
fore attractive, should be more than a
mere inn for the feeding of hungry
guests, or IL lodging house, where they
may find beds when they are weary.
That it is sometimes no more than
this, is abupdantly proved by observa-
ton. We see brothers and sisters, and
sons and daughters, who are in haste to
find any shelter, rather than that of the |
parental roof We know that people |
often yawn by their own tiresides, while
they are quite brilliant abroad.
We reluctantly admit that sparkle,
flavor and charm, the zest of life, is not
invariably found, even in homes which |
are hallowed in the morning and at |
night by the breath of sincere devotion.
We cannot fail to see, that life may he
honest, honorable, useful and clarita-
bic, and withal, intensely disagreeable
so that, till relieved from its needless
asperIties, its cup ut the lips shall be
bitter, and its memories in the heart he
like bells out of tune.
Foremost, among the deplorable dis
tresses which disturb domestic peace,
is the vice of fault-fnding. 1t matters
very little who the inveterate fault
finder is. If it be Il parent, it is rather
worse than if it be one of the children,
for parents are always entitled to re-
spect, and nobody can satisfactorily re-
sent their unjust criticisms. Perhaps
the transgressOrs are almost unaware of
the extent of their sin, for the bad habit
of scolding began long ago, and being
tolerated, has become unconscious.
Men and women may scold, and scowl,
and sheer, and yet believe themselves
patterns of amiability. There are TIA
bles at which the sauce to every dish is
the same. The fish is watery, tic pv-
tatoes are soggy, the meats are over or
UNDERGONE, the gravies are burned, aud
the pastry is heavy. Nothing is right.
At such feasts the saying of grace is a
manifest irony.
1t may not be IL fault-finder, bnt only
melancholy and moody young lady or
gentleman, whose views of the world
are all colored by dyspepsia, or hypo-
chondria, who manages to make home
gloomy and wretched. Companionship
with one who is morbid or cynical, as
with one who is often perverse and
quarrelsome, occasions friction which
is very wearing. In the home afflicted
by the presence of any of these unfor-
Inmates, the days never glide by. They
bump along, with succession of iolts,
like springless carts over corduroy
road. No wonder people lie down tired
at night, to waken hopeless in the
morning, with so much to tax patience
and Christian resignation.
A frequent and needless asperity is
found in the lack of that sturdy indie
pendence, which accepts the situation
and adjusts arrangements to it will
dignity. You cannot afford to dwell il
a certain street, nor to maintain a eer
tain style, and of this you feel assured
Your income, provided your expenses
could he reduced, would amply suffic,
for comfort, while, as it is, the prophet
-simile fits your case precisely, for tn
bed is too short, and the coverlets ar