Centre Democrat. [volume] (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1848-1989, 1879-05-15

Always keep to the LEFT by this course
you show spirit untrammeled by the
thrall of convention. IL may irritate
those you meet; but what of that. SO
long as their irritation hurts them and
not youp
The above rule may be departed from
with propriety when the person met also
shows an inclination to go to the left.
Then, while pretending To- do the same,
dart suddenly to the right With prac-
ticc. hy dodging first to one side and
then to the other, you may keep n person
at bay for several minutes. Not only Is
this a good example physically, but II
affords you an opportunity To study your
cis-d-UiS. The proper study of mankind
is man.
BY all means carry cane. In the
hands of an expert IL Is a powerful aux
iliary i'm making pedcstrianism a boon.
IL should be carried over the shoulder.
the ferrulc end on n level with the eye of
the person following in your wake. II
you can contrive to stop abruptly now
and then, it will greatly add To his pleas
urc. q
Ifnot convenient to carry the cane as
above, another favorite fashion is to trail
it few feet behind you. The only OBJ
lection to this is that occasionally some
ungentlemanly individual will tread on
your stick and break it. However. the
pleasure afforded your fellows in tripping
over your cane amply compensates for
the loss of one now and then.
Prodigics may be accomplished with
An umbrella. When one comes to deal
ing with this. he quits matters mundane
and scars to the empyrean.
When closed. the umbrella should be
carried under the arm or on the shoulder.
DO this, and the oculist will bless you.
When carried under the arm, n feat Of
surprising merit can be achieved by any
one after little practice. This consists
in turning half round suddenly. BY this
you kill two birds with one stone, or
rather one umbrella. This exploit al
ways calls forth remark.
With an open umbrella great amusc-
ment can be obtained by knocking off
hats, eyeglasses and even wigs. This Is
rather too common to be recommended
as n novelty, to he sure, but it should
not, nevertheless, be overlooked.
Never walk in direct path; il is in
better taste to wabble from side to side
of the walk. This gives any person be-
hind you diversity ofview to the front /;
besides which. il exercises the patience
of him who would pass you too eagerly
Patience being a virtue. ii should be eX-
ercised.
OF course it would be idle to instruct
ladies how to dispose their garments.
They are such consummate experts in
this matter that we shall attempt but
one reflection.
Trains should he worn rs far back on
the sidewalk rs the length of the material
will allow. In the absence of train. n
shawl can he substituted. If any i'll
hammered maH should step on your trail
ing garments of the day. treat him sum-
marily. and in the manner his act
deserves
Where there are two or three together.
they may live in every heart by walking
with due deliberation and spreading out
To the breadth of the pave.
II is your duty to run into all the
ladies you meet. 1t has n tendency to
throw back their shoulders, you know.
Ladies are oftener round-shouidered than
men. You would best not attempt this
with men. They might not appreciate
your well-intentioned attentions.
If you have parcels with you, your
own good sense will teach you how to
dispose them so as to cover all the sur
face possible. The law of gravitation Is
your sufficient warrant for this.
With nm oil can or paint pot you may
be more potent than the greatest earthly
monarch. The possibilities of these ac-
Cessorics are illimitable.
There might be many more rules laid
down. But the above are sufficient. II
strictly followed, you will be immortal
iZcd-and very quickly Boston Tran
script.