The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-05-11

grounds, cat held by the
hind legs and vigorously swung over
ones head, and brought down with
force upon the sod, will be quite effect
ual. 1t sometimes Injuries the cat.
Beau Brummel is poor idiot in
Calais, with one candle and servant,
who treats him to phantom receptions
of phantom duchesses and dukes whom
he used to know, and thus the life and
hope are kept in the wretched old man.
Two hundred and fifty raw doctors
stepped across the threshold in Phila-
delphia a few days ago, and are now
calmly, patiently, even cheerfully, wait
ing for the first green apple to open
business.
The Baptist ministers of New York
have informally decided that women
may preach if they have the necessary
gifts, grace and other accomplishments.
But why can't the same restrictions be
put upon men?
Gen. Shields was hit during the
Mexican war with copper bullet, which
went through his lungs, coming out at
the back, so that, in treating him, a
silk handkerchief was passed through
to clear the wound.
Prisoners in the Connecticut State
Prison get a reduction in time of two
months from each year of their term
by good behavior. This to a man
serving life sentence must amount to
considerable at the end of his time
Ddnbury NeocS.
The Catskil Recorder is mean
enough to expose the profession in this
shameful way: "An EDITORS wife never
goes through her husbands other trou-
ser-pockets to strike a package of love-
letters. Editors are not like the wicked,
unfaithful men of the world-editors
rarely have the other trousers"
Married women are not allowed to
take rooms at the Stewart Woman's Ho-
tel, and unmarried women are not al
lowed to be courted on the premises.
1t is easy to be seen that such an estab-
lishment cannot flourish, for whatsoever
enters there must bid farewell to hopes
and husbands.
The wise daughter is the pride of
her father, yea, her mother doth de-
light in her; but the foolish maiden
bringeth sorrow. She hangeth on the
front gate; she tippeth up her hat over
her left ear. Her eye is full of the
Old Nick. She glanceth over her Shout
der when she promenades on Main
street. Her handkerchief is also seen.
Then the dry-goods clerk says: "Ha!
har He smileth to himself; he max
eth mistakes in the measure of calico.
-AppIetons' Journal.
-" Mabel Clare" writes us the follow
ing fiattering inquiry: care you the
author of that tender little ballad:
Darling, Kiss My Eyelids Down P" We?
We write such stuff as that? "Kiss our
eyelids DOWN." Mabel, thou art beside
thyself; much reading hath made thee
mad. Darling, kiss our eyelids down.
Now isn't that nice thing to accuse us
of saying? Are we that devoid of intelli-
gence? Mabel, don't you trouble our
eyelids when you have a fancy to per-
form any operations of that delicate
and tender nature. We have a large,
comfortable, roomy, flexible cash just
below our nose that has bought county
rights for all business of that nature
that comes within the limits of our face,
and any eyelid found interfering or in
fringing will be prosecuted to the eX-
IRENE limit of the law. No, we didn' t
write it.-BurIington Haack-Eyc.
FANTASIA DE PRINTEMPs.
In the aises of the orchard fair blossoms are
drifting,
The white petals drop one by one,
And the tulips pale stalk from the garden is
lifting
A goblet of gems to the SUM-
Come ramble awhile through this exquisite
weather
OF days that are fleet to pass,
When the stem of the willow shoots out a
green feather,
And buttercups burn in the grass!
When, pushing the soil from her bonny pink
shoulders,
The clover glides forth to the world,
And the fresh MOSES CLEAN on the gray rug
ged powders,
With delicate Maydew impaired!
The brook in the pasture has hidden its peb-
bles,
Full flooded with April rain,
And listen, my love, to the silvery trebles
That ring from the poisoning lane!
What VOWS to their sweethearts the gay robins
utterl
No marvel such wooers are heard
Heigh, no! how the bosoms that scorn us
would futter
If man could make love like a bird
-E101r F1lpceff