Daily globe., 1878-02-24
Fantastic Freaks Of Figures.
Norristown Herald

Fantastic Freaks Of Figures.
Norristown Heraldl
Figures won't lie,' saws the poet-whos.
name has slipped our memory. perhap.
not: but sometimes they make mos; remark
able statements and stand up to their worl
III such shaky manner that our confidence
in their yeracity is greatly shaken.
A good multiplication ble-wrestler vii
pile up column after column of figures te
prove that the defeat OF his political candi
date this year by $4,000 majority against
5000 last year is gain for his side of 1000
votes.
II such curious cipherins doesn't create q
strong suspicion that figures lie like the an
nual statement of New York life insurance
company, it at least leaves All impression
that they are weak in the imbs.-and often
cut pretty figure, fguratvely speaking.
The man who has the multiplication table
at his figures ends. and can foot up i. column
or 1lgures SIX inches high and two broad as
quick as you could pronounce half OF the
name of Russian General is a serpent il,
the social circle,-a sort of boa. or bore, or
well. he's an adder. anyhow. He is as
great nuisance as the indefatigabIe bore
who propounds such queries as this: Sup
pose your mothers daughter married your
grandfathers nephew on your uncle;s side
what relation would their children be to your
aunts step-lnother! or somehow that wav
You probably have met such bores.
The multiplication table man. at the rist.
of his life, will tell You that 8 multiplied
1856 42O,4S9 times by itself would require
369, ,6S3, 100 ciphers, and to count it, working
ten hours daily, would take Is years ard o30
days. And then you heave sigh mile
long and wish with all your might that he
would go off somewhere by himself and
work out the problem. If to perform this
arlthmetIcal task required only five wears
and no days we don't suppose one of the ad-
der,s hearers would 60 to work at the job.
The inventor OF the game of chess was
bade by the King of India to name his own
reward, upon which he asked to receive The
number OF grains of wheat that would he
produced If one grain We're paid him for the
hrst square OF the chess, two for the second
four for the third. eight for the fourth. and
SO on doubled up Tor every square of the
sixty four. When these amounts were addet,
the sum was found to be 1916. 744O73551.
6l5 OF g,alns,-''enough to cover all the con
hnents OF the earth with layer one-third of
an inch in thickness
The name OF the party who counted tie
grains rs not given. but it is highly probable
that be stopped counting at the expiration of
the ninety-seventh year, and, YEARLY ex-
claiming lis wheat to be remembered .
guessed at the number remaining. History
doesn't say SO, but it must have gone against
the grain Of the King to fulfill his promise.
campaign lie, invented by the enemy for some
sinister purpose.
Light, according to Prof Somebody.
travels $4,000 miles second. This is
much faster than the defaulting president of
savings bank travels. He prefers darkness
when he goes, and travels at the rate of
about thirty miles an hour. but regrets that
ne can't make as good time as light.
Another fgure-twister says if one cent
were set out at compound interest in the
year at per cent, the 1st Of January
1866, it would amount to l quintillion 1Ol.-
45o quadrillions 332 trillions of millions.
cent is very small sum, and we all
might set out that amount at compound in
terest for the benefit of our posterity eigh-
y CSs
some persons persistently refuse to do any
thing for posterity simply because posterity
has never done anything for them
The same authority further declares that
it we paid the tax collector the amount above
mentioned in silver he would need 3.oO3.-
445,0OO.OO0, ,0OO,OCO.O0O wagons for It's trans
portation.
When you owe that much taxes, therefore.
had ha{fQr bo
backs or checks, for-to quote the Professor
aforesaid-.'a robbery could be committed
on the hindnost wagon which would not be
discovered till the 24,78O.h generation of tax
collectors
Hence the cleaner, to save his reputation
and money, and prevent being moved to
make room for man belonging to the OPP
posite political party, would be compelled
to employ force larger that the United
States army before it was cut down to lO,-
900 men to please Mr.. Dana of the New
York Sun, to travel along with the wagon
train to protect it from the depredations of
road agents, especially if he was going in
the direction of the Black Hills.
This sum of money, we are also informed,
distributed among the people of the earth.
would give each of its 1000. 100000 of in
habitants about 1.2OO trillions of dollars.
and he or she could every moment use 80
100000 for 3s,096,0OO years without reach
ing the bottom of his OF her purse.
But who wants to spend that much money
in that many years? Better give some Of it
to the poor-though, by the way, come to
think Of it, there would be no poor to re-
ceiye it. Such a distribution, moreover,
would not make things as pleasant for us as
at first sight appears. If everybody had an
endless purse for 38.O96,O0O years nobody
could be induced to do any work, and we should
all be obliged to make our own shirts. and
trousers, and things. The only alternative
would be to go without clothes and join the
Lydia Thompson ballet troupe.
Let us remark, parenthetically, that while
writing of these colossal sums of money We
become totally obliyious to the hard. sad