Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1878-09-04
MUCH IN LITTLE.


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We do not possess what we do not
understand.
He who knows no language but his
own does not even know that
Who hath sorrow who hath woe /?
They that tarry long at the water.
melon.
People always retain sufficient ener-
gy to do that of which they are con.
vinccd.
Let memory fail so long ss you can
rely on your Judgment at moments
notice.
The sleep OF memory is not its death
forgotten studies are certain aptitudes
gone TO sleep.
Tho vices of the rich and great are
mistaken for errors, and those Of the
poor and lowly for crimes.
A good man will be doing good
whorcsoever he is. His trade is q com.
pound of charity and justice.
A magistrate, censuring some boys
for lettering in tho streets, asks "lf
everybody were TO stand in the streets,
how could anybody get by?
He is the eloquent man who can
treat subjects of an humble nature with
delicacy lofty things impressively, and
moderate things tcmperately.
"You call that trunk, do you ?"
growled detected porter. at only
needs lightning conductor to make it
look like a boarding house.
aAro you lost, my little fellow p
asked gentleman of four-year-old
one day in Rochester. "No,n he sob
bed in reply; "b-but m-ny motheris.
Speaking of the rapid manner in
which bad deeds are perpetrated, Mrs.
Partington called special attention to
the TACT that 1t required only two Sec
onds to fight duel.
An old gentleman who was getting
"thin at the top" say: always pick
out bald headed barber TO shave you,
because he can't constantly ask you to
buy his hair restorative"
That's the smallest horse | ever
saw, said countryman on viewing a
Shetland pony. "Indade, now" repl-
ed his Irish companion, "but I've seen
one as small as two of him."
1t is sad TO think that an Intelligent,
well educated dog that jumps through
hoop and barks for cracker to-day
may cling dejectedly to an iron hook on
the meat rack tomorrow, in more links
than his teeth and claws.
"Mr. Jones'" said Mis-. Jones, with
an air OF triumph, "don't you think
marriage is a means Of grace2" "Well,
yes" growled Jones; 81 suppose any
thing is a means of grace that breaks
down pride and leads to repentance"
A Frenchman took room in Paris,
on condition that the landlady would
wake him up every morning at eight
o'clock, and tell him the day Of the
week, the state of the weather, and
under what form of government he
lived.
In the dressing room--"Mary, dear,
aren't you well why don't you come
down stairs 2" "Oh, I've got one
eyebrow blacker than the other, and /
can't find a pencil anywhere, and it
won't wash off, and | don't know what
to do at ALL"
As old Van Shroomps was giving his
youngest, who was inclined to be lazy,
u good cowhiding, the boy cried out,
"Oh, don't, fadder, it makes me smart !"
"That's shoost vat | wants." said the
old man, as he whacked away with re-
newed vigor.
A "woman's rights" says that girls
are not particular enough about the
men they marry but there is wo-
man over in Chelsea who is so particu-
lar about the man she married that she
takes her sewing to his office, and sits
there all day till he is ready to 60
home.
A tippler called at farmhouse in
Amherst the other day, and asked for
cider. "No, Tom," said the farmer,
"you've had enough to drink today
no friend of yours would give you cid
err" ooh good Lord" cried Tom,
very weary, leaning against the fence,
"pleasc send along some ofmy enemies" ."
$50 you're going to Alaska, are you,
young man ?" said an old fur.hunter to
a Philadelphia youth, adding "You
Just be careful how you kill the wife OF
a native OF that country, for no one
was ever known to be left off from such
an accident for less than two woolen
blankets to the bereaved husband, and
five TO the Governor"
One of the ''school-marms" who re-
Gently went to Oregon to engage in
the duties of her vocation thus writes
] to her friends at home; "a panther
was killed last week near my school
room, measuring seven feet from tine
tip of the ears to the extremity OF the
tail, and seven back again, making
fourteen in ALL Smart "school.marm"
that
4 A romancing traveller told Garrick
that he had seen q church in Spain a
mile and a.half long. "Bless me, said
! Garrick show broad was il ?" "About
ten yards" was the reply. "This is,
you will observe, gentlemen, said Gar
rick to the company, mot round lie,
but differs from his other stories, which
are generally as broad as they are
long"
A lady, walking down town, saw
little boy pinching his younger broth
er, who was crying bitterly. "Why,
my boy" said she to the young tor.
mentor, "don't you know you are do
ing very wrong2 What would you do
if you should kill your little brother 2"
"Why," he replied, 81 should put on
my new black pants and go to the
funeral !"
No friends have perfect suitableness
to each other, and roughncss and in
equalities that are nearest us are most
troublesome. The wonderful variety
contrariety of apprehension, inverts
temperaments, occasions and tempta-
tions are such, that, whilst we arc
scandalized at discord and confusions
of the world, we must recall ourselves,
and admire that all.ruling Providence
which kcepeth up so much order and
concord as there is.
Curran was once addressing jury,
when the judge, who was thought to
be antagonistic to his client, intimated