The Centre reporter. [volume] (Centre Hall, Pa.) 1871-1940, 1878-02-14

/ NhlkfIk hticAb-9WCatR PhDt4NAAAAAss
The boneless woriaer-a well done
steak.
q t" Put your bps ON lee" Is the latest
slang. h
Very usefui TO the tillsr Of the soil
steers.
Highly connectsd-the man in the
1 moon. -
Tn South America the cities are lighted
with castor OH
Europe obtains her sole supply OF shoe
pegs from America.
1 In Japsn ALAS requires fish 10 be sold
alive. They are peddled IN tanks.
Pittsbwrg has dog that can wait at
table. This mnst be Old Dog Tray.
A man ugay be In great straits. who
never heard Of either Magellan or Behr-
! ing. -
( RussiA estimates that NEXT years
1 campaign viii cost her shout 800, CO.,
coo in gold.
To cure q baniAelar'st aehes-earry To
I the pAtient eighteen yards OF silk with
women init
Ia Garland, COL, they rang out the
old year Will. four murders, and usher
Ell ia the new with one.
Under Spanish Law q man suspected Of
crime can be kept In prison Tor five years
before tins ease Is called
Straws nhoE which way the wind
! blows. You can get the same infOrma-
ton from q pan Of ashes.
Such IA the hydrophobia scare in
I LONDON that the police are capturing
I dogs at the rate 200 day.
II is said that when Jonah saw the
whale getting ready 10 swallow him he
7 looked 'sdo~n in the mouth
Those young ladies "a fairs who sell
/ i've cent pin cushions for 90 ought 10 be
arrested for robbing the males.
No person wishing 70 avoid slang
words and nicknAmee viii call il " banjo.
The f1Il name is /" banioseph.
A little boy inquired concerning the
stars Pa, what are those things up
there-Are they little drops of sun =
An Irish lover remarked that ID Is &
great pleasure 20 be alene, especially
when your sweetheart Is by your side.
Coustantinople contains 750, 900 in
1 hahitants. Tie old eastern empire
walls, twenty-one miles in circuit, still
surround il.
The baker and his customer
4 esiass A dudred nature Ssow
q. The latter nosds che a rtzf of LIE,
The former kne4ds the dough
The man VINO owns q Sc, 900 COW can
drink milk costing him eiglrty-four cents
quart That's all the adTantagr he has
over the rest nf us.
Il A Montana justice Of the peace doesn't
splurge any when he marnes n couple.
dc saws s'Arise Grab hands
Hitched Six dollars"
Father 10 son just from college
/ 's What have You learned at your col
4 lege? I'VE never learn anything
] they never let You see the newspapers.
A lady living near Cynthiana, KY,
has used the same six pins for twenty
years. She Is eighty-three, but her
neighbors sHE she is the same old SIX
pins still-
In a wrestling match between Luclen
Marc and a bear, in Cincinnati, Marc
succeeded IN throwing the bear, but IN
! the struggle the bear mt OF one OF
! Mares fingers
4 81 live in Julin's eyes, said an affect
I ed dandy in CnlmMn' 4 hearing. " don't
wonder at il" replied George, since
4 observed she had sty IN them when
I saw her last. sfe
Fnasnored writing-master 90 young
I lady pupil - i cAn teach you moth
I ina Won, hand is alrrady a very deslra-
bic one, and your Is are the most beau
T tiful have ever seen.
The man who comes 10 the depot two
minutes behind time, and sees the rail
way train scadding out at the other end,
/ derives no satisfaction from the proverb:
+ = Better late than never.
\ The cafes plant thrives finely in
I California. producing bean Of strongly
aromatic favor. IL grows best IN cen
trail and southern California, and Its
culture Is becoming profitable.
.wrrH MY PICTURE,
oh place II ia pretty frame,
= Upan your r1RDtetSheh
Then hss IL onoe, for me, my nAre,
Then-kiss il for yourself
EF1os 7-CAarles START Felies IN Boheue
~ say. Charley" said one friend to
another ON meeting, :" / bear our friend
Brown has been dabbling i'm stocks late
ly: has he made anything" Yes,
saws Charley, "he has made an assign
ment
A singular accident occurred on
Satchell Greek, Kansas, recently. A
party OF hunters were loading mp team
prenaratory 10 starting for Wichita,
when one OF the men threw sn axe into
the wagon, which discharged shotgun
loaded with buckshot The charge
entered his head and he was killed in
stantly. Ia
Afterthe failure OF the late insurrection
I'm Japan n richly-attired Japanese
Young lady was found lying dead in a
castle moat. with her fathers head In
her left hand and bloody knife in her
right The devoted heroine had cut off
her fathers head, at his command, and
then killed herself, that the two might
not be taken prisoners.
The. heaviest court in the United
States, in proportion to the number of
its judges. is probably the court of ap-
peals of Kentucky. Chief Justice Lind
sew weighs 132 pounds, Judge Elliott
22O pounds. Judge Pryor POS pounds,
and Judge Cofef 20l pounds. The
shNGI4AEt NcAk1t. IS -4AO4 RNAAN0-
wisdom and weight go together, then
Kentucky justice is all right.
There's nothing to exceed the diaboli
cal satisfaction a manswil take In an
nouncing to his wife, after he has got
his shirt ON, that there is button miss
ing, and the keen delight he feels in
seeing her dance around the room after
a needle and thread, while she listens to
lecture on carelessness, approaches
/ ecstacy. But look ont when she gets
that button on, bites the thread off with
/ snap and commences" There now.
\ A lunatic en- route with two keepers
to an asylum at St Robert (FranceJ
wouldn't get out at that place, and while
they were coazing him, the train, by
some oversight of the conductor, started.
! At Grenoble he got out, but, strange TO
say, no Telegram ordering the arrest APP
pears 10 have been sent, and Of his own
accord he took a ticket back TO St.
Robert, and got into third class car
riage with one young man, whom he
presently attacked. The victim tried to
escape, and the mad man then pushed
himsout, and jumped after him break
ing his oEn-arm IN doing SO. The head
of the other struck on the rail and he
wac killed. When asked Why he attack
| ed his coruynuion he only said that he