The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-01-26

In jogging through life you often
shake hands with college graduates of
lar bill would feel mighty lonesome,
but Louisville has a newsboy worth
$4,000 1t don't make much difference
in this country who man is, or what
he makes; it's what he salts down that
nts.-Bre0kfdSt Table.
in olden times, when people heard
Some swindler huge had come to grief,
They used good old Saxon word,
And called that man, "a thief"
But language such as that to-day
Upon too many feelings CRATES,
So people smile and simply say,
'He-' re-hypothecates.'
". Y. Commercial AdyertiSer.
Recently a minister received a cler-
gyman's half-fare travelling card, as
they are called, and wrote to the Super
intendent asking IF he could not en-
brace his wife also" The Superintend-
ent replied that he thought likely he
could, but did not want to say positive
" until he had seen his wife, as he was
a little fastidious in his tastes. DeNUer
Tribune.
"A writer in AppIetoas' Journal
says: Women need much consolation
in this world. Sometimes they are in
love. Indeed, this is so common a COM
plant with them that they should have
a metaphorical camphor or spiritual
arnica to apply to that hidden wound.
The needle is a good little lightning
rod-a conductor-otf for concealed dis
turbance. Many a headache has been
embroidered away.
The lady with "experience as a
writer and devoted to journalism
wanted a place on first-class daily
journal. She "would be content with
her expenses for salary till she showed
her value" and the editor thought it
would be encouraging cheap labor to
engage her till she sent down to the
office her bill at an uptown hotel, with
her laundry account charged twenty
one dollars month for fluted skirts
~ Y Mail.
The report of the Commissioner OF
Internal Revenue shows that the total
number of licensed saloons or drinking
places in the country is 1914, 599, or one
to every 280 persons. OF all the States
Illinois is fourth in the number of sa-
looms, having 1O,54S, the three which
take precedence being New York, Penn
sylvania and Ohio. North Carolina has
the greatest number of distilleries, ], 025,
and New York the most breweries, 379.
The Colorado Springs MOuntaince1
makes some tritling corrections in Lucy
Stones descriptions of "Grace Green
woods cottage 1t isn't ga neat
brick house," but of wood. There are
no grape-vines. There are no thrifty
apple and cherry trees by the back
fence" Finally, "Grace Greenwood
has g sold the cottage and all its beauti
full surroundings, gone down East, got
the asthma, and to all appearances
abandoned the large and profitable
business of organizing and arranging al
the suffrage work of this great State. -
SMILE wHENE'ER YOU CAN.
When things don't 20 to suit you,
And the world seems upside down,
Don't waste your time in fretting,
But drive away that frown;
Since life is oft perplexing,
| IT'S much the wisest plan
To bear all trials bravely,
And smile whene'er you can.
:. And thus despoil to-day?
For when you borrow trouble,
You must expect to pay;
It's a good old maxim,
Which should be often preached
Don't cross the bridge before you
Until the bridge is reached.
You might be spared much signing
If you would bear in mind
The thought that good and evil
Are always here combined;
There must be something wanting,
And though you roll in wealth,
You miss from out your casket
That precious iewel-health
And though you're strong and sturdy,
You may have an empty purse
And earth has many trials
Which ] consider worse;
But whether Joy or sorrow
Fill up your mortal span,
Twill make your pathway brighter
To smile whene'er you can!