davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

THE DARDENELLEs.- Dardanelles,
toward which so much attention is now di-
rected, fairly teens with historic and poetic
memories. Its navigation was first attempt
ed by the Argonauts under Jason, in their
search for the Golden Fleece. At Abydos,
Xerxes built his famous bridge of boats for
the invasion of Greece, and it was here that
the loves of Hero and Leander became world
renowned. Leander, who lived at Abydos,
on the Asiatic shore, was in love with Hero,
the beautiful priestess of Venus, at Sestos,
and regularly swan the strait to meet his
mistress. One dark and stormy night he
failed to appear, and when the luckless Hero
visited the shore the next morning the waves
had washed the dead body of her lover upon
the sands. Overcome by her loss, she
plunged into the sea, and the spot became
ever after sacred to their memory. On the
Sd of March, 1910. Lord Byron swan the
Dardannelles at the same point in seventy
minutes. He was accompanied by Lieut..
Akenhead, whose name has been handed
down to postelity in the line:
Which Leander, Mr.. Akenhead, and did.
The swim from Abydos to Sestos is still re-
peated yearly by Byron-inspired tourists
and will probably continue to be as long as
the glamour of poetry and tradition hang'
around the spot.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

Let not short-sighted man say in his
heart, 'Vengeance is mine," for he will
shoot poor devil of a lawyer and the
guilty man will have the cakes and ale. A
promising young fellow in Lyons fell into
bad company and plunged into many exces-
ses, but this did not prevent him from max
ing love to a young lady and being fired
with the passion Of jealousy. No sooner
did the fair one give him the cold shoulder
in place of warm heart than his suspicious
fell upon a lawyer whom he charged
with having laid bare his real char
acter to the dear object of affection. The
jealous suitor loaded revolver and prowled
about the city night and day watching for
his rival and plotting vengeance. Unfortu-
nately he was very near sighted and could
recognize an acquaintance only when close
to him.. About three weeks ago, as he was
standing at an entrance of the Palace of
Justice, he fanced he saw the calumniator
coming out of the court. With wild cry
he darted forward and fired his revolver
Ping -pang: the man fell on the sidewalk
mortally wounded. But as myopic Mem
esis stopped to curse the hated foe, he
started back in horror. He had shot the
wrong man. The gentleman who lay gasp
ing on the ground was good natured, in
offensive barrister who had never meddled
with anybody's love making.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

A few days ago, at the Parish of st. Ray
mond, county Pont Neuf, man named
Thomas Trudell, 70 years of age, was mar
ried for the sixth time. His first wife died,
leaving son now 40 years of age. After
six months single-blessedness he married,
but this wife lived only ten months After
a few months he married widow, with
whom he lived for eight or nine years, but
missionary informed Madame Trudell No.
that her first husband was alive in one OF
the missions visited by him; so Mr.. Trudell
set to work to get unmarried by the Bishop.
Six weeks later, he married girl who was
his first cousin No. lived thirteen months
and within two years was succeeded by
No. 5, who lived twenty years with him.
She died in a pril, 1875. Now. after living
sidgle for nearly three years, he has led to
the alter blushing widow between 81 and
go years of age, named Madame Plamondon'
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21
GOT INTO THE WRONG PEW.

He was rather an uncoth looking individ
ual, and as he sauntered into the store thu
crowd sitting on the barrels winked at eacl
other and made remarks about his person
"Where did it come from ?" asked one
pointing at him.
Somebody left the door open and it blew
in," said another.
81 don't think it's alive" said third.
"Touch it and see," remarked fourh.
eyes, it's man-see it move ?" queried
the first.
All hands laughed boisterously.
"Im poor man, and | don't want to
have any trouble with anybody. Pm a
Christian, and l don't believe in turmoil
and strife and can't participate in in.
pray, you worldly minded people, that you
will allow me to depart in peace" said the
new arrival.
One of the crowd, more daring than the
rest hammered the mans hat down over
his eyes, and another dabbed his nose full
of molasses from barrel standing by.
Then the poor Christian took small
volume from his pocket and began reading
the Scriptures in drawing. sing song tone
While he was engaged at this the crowd
played all sorts of tricks on him.
One put some eggs in his pocket and
another mashed them.
Then the biggest man in the house
poured some oil on his hat and lighted it.
Then the clerk hit him under the nose
with Goldfish.
Then the man quietly put the little vol
ume in his coat-tail pocket, and the clerk
went head first into the molasses barrel
When the biggest man in the the house
picked himself from under the counter it
was next to an imposibility to guess where
his nose left off and where the Goldfish be-
gan. No. made work for the glazier as
he hit a ventilator in the window. No. 2
Matched out "a barrel of eggs, and No. got
up on the pie shelf and staid there. As
No. walked out of the door on his
back he wondered how much it would cost
to make him as good as new, ami the poor
Christian man remarked:
"The next time you fellows pick me up
for slouch look out you amt in the wrong
pew. Good day, fellers."
The clerk is waiting for them to come
round and settle for damage done, but they
must have forgotten where the place is as
they pass right by without looking in, and
their bills remain unpaid. d.-Shenandoah
Herald.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

Hone SING ON WoMEN.-''Me no likee
all lis thomfoolery. Melica mans woman
tloo muchee likee peacockee-she alice time
wantee show feathers. She gIot tloo
muchee blustle; tloo muchee paddee; tloo
muchee paintee and powdee Me no likee
lat. Hong Sing no have lat kind woman.
Chinaman glot woman just lkee man. No
thom1oolery, pletticloats or blustle. When
Melica man see my woman washee shirtee
he go uppee and he say, "You wife in?"
She winkee tlo me and she say, "Dlon't
you see her washee bly, the door," Then
Melica man come uppee Ito me and he say,
"Ah, glood morning Mssee Hong Sing
how much flo shirtee?' Melica man no
can tellee which of my wife and me is me
and which of my wife and me is my wife.
Melica woman is peacockee. Chinawoman
just likee Chinaman-no can tellee differ
encen'
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

THE PoPEs.-The Journal of the French
Statistical Society published recently some
curious statistics which cannot fail to be in
teresting at this time. From tn It source
we gather the following information:
Plus TX was the 252d Pope Of these Is
were French, 13 Greeks, Syrians, 6 Ger
mans, Spaniards, 2 Africans, 2 Savoisiens.
2 Dalmations; England, Portugal, Holland,
Switzerland and Canada furnishing one
each; Italy provided the rest. Since 1923
all the Popes have been selected from Ital-
ian Cardinals. Seventy Bishops of Rome,
belonging with very few exceptions, to the
epoch preceding the establishment of the
temporal power, have been proclaimed
saints. The ten last centuries have seen
only nine Popes judged worthy by the Popes
themselves of being sanctiied. OF the 252
Pont1tfs, not including st. Peter eight died
within month after their elevation to the
Popedom, 40 within year; % were seated
between 1 and 2 years, 81 from to 5 years,
81 from 5 to 10 years, 81 from Toto Is years,
IS from Is to 90 years, and 9 more than 90
years.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

Being sent the other day to Rome to rep
resent France at the funeral of Victor
Emanuel, and the accession to the throne of
I1umberto, Marshal Canrobert was given
10000 francs for the expenses of himself
and suite. He spent only $4,000. and on
his return home went to the foreign office
and handed to Minister Waddinpton the
balance, amounting to 1900 francs. The
minister refused to take the money, saying
that there was no precedent for such thing.
that the outlay was made and accounted
for, and that there was an end to it. The
marshel answered that if it was absolutely
necessary that somebody should steal this
money, he would rather some one else
should do it, and asked for a receipt.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21
NO. 1868
LIGHT SPONGY BREAD.

To make it, it is necessary to have GOOD
yeast. This is one one way to make it:
Take six good-sized potatoes boil them in
two quarts of water, with small handful
OF hops; when done, take them out sprink-
lie over them two -spoonfuls of -four,
mash them thoroughly, and mix with them
enough hop-water to prevent Jumping; re-
turn to the hop water, add half-cupful of
sugar, a tables spoonful of salt and tea
spoonful OF ginger; let the mixture boil two
or three minutes; when nearly cool, add
small quantity of yeast; a yeast-cake such
as can be bought in packages in any grocery
store will do; let it stand in warm place
twenty-four hours to ferment; bottle tightly
and keep in cool place; this will keep six
weeks in winter, not more than three in
summer. To make the bread, take six po-
tatoes of medium size, boil them in about
three pints of water; when done, take them
out and put with them table spoonful each
of sugar and lard mash the potatoes, and
pour over them the water in which they
were boiled, still boiling hot; stir in flour
enough to make rather thick batter this
should be done at night, and the sponge left
in warm place; in the morning, sprinkle
in tablespoonful of salt, and -four enough
to knead we'll; knead thoroughly; twepty
minutes is not too much. If put in a very
warm place, this will rise in four or five
hours, but must be allowed to become verv
light. When light, make into loaves and
knead few minutes; put into pans and let
rise one hour; bake, in a rather quick oven,
from half to three quarters of an hour, ac-
cording to the size of the loaves.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

There are two animated barometers in
Sacramento, CAL, that have proved trust
worthy, even where artificial instruments
have failed. One of them is a catfish
which is kept in a water trough. No mat
ter how clear the weather may be, this fish
always, before a storm, makes it point to
swim about with his head below the water
and his tail above. When the rain begins
to fall he goes out of sight until the weather
changes. The other is couple of frogs
under the floor of the police office, which
have never yet been seen by any officers,
but who presage storm several hours in
advance of the barometrical indications, by
| a series of peculiarly discordant croaks-
No matter how clear and bright the night,
the police then make it point to prepare
for storm, and the warning has never
proved in vain.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

RELIABLE AUTHORITY .-Sallie Jov White
In one of her accent press letters, tells this
story: ga lady of my acquaintance, " ho
has spent some time abroad, and who tray-
eled with both eyes open, as so many tour
lists don't travel. attended series of lee
lures of Pompeii, given this winter by a
gentleman who has acquired quite a repu-
tatlon as dilineator of foreign countries.
their customs, etc. She had been to Pom
peii herself, and was amazed at several mis-
statements which he made with an air of
positiveness which almost staggered her.
After the lecture was over she sought and
obtained an audience with him, and at once
commenced questioning him on the points
on which she had detected his errors. He
tried to defend himself until when oues-
tion after question was put to him which
he could not answer, he lowered his voine
and said. My dear madam. I'm free to con-
fess | never was there And this man has
for two years been quoted as reliable au-
thority.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

Dean stared at the sudden change. anG
walked forward with low whistle of as
tohishment He had not taken two step.
when he felt the hand of the captain on his
shoulder.
81 must be mad indeed when l could
speak to you like that, jack he said kind
ly. Forget it, for the sake of old times,
and in the memory of the days we have
passed happily together"
The two men clasped hands, when a
crashing sound was heard, and the schooner
went over on her beam ends The main
boom came flying over, and before Jack
Dean could make move to save himself.
he was cast like feather into the boiling
surge under the lee. AS Captain Wade
sprung to his feet the wild cry imam over
board!' rang in his ear. John Dean, the
betrothed of the woman he loved, was at
the mercy of the waves. For one moment.
and only moment, he stood motionless,
and then grasping the end of coil of line,
lie cast it about his waist by quick turn,
and hurled himself madly into the sea, cry
ing:
''Stand BY Throw her up into the wind
and hold her, if every stick goes''
The next moment the water closed over
his head, and the man who had threatened
his rival with death was doing his utmost
to save him. This strong, true man had
been tempted, for breatbless moment, to
let the waves complete the work which they
had begun.
The waves lifted him upon their crests,
and he saw just below him the struggling
form of John Dean, who, half stunned by
the blow from the boom, was just able to
keep himself afloat. He literally hurled
himself through the water, and clutched
him by the hair for he dared not let the
drowning man touch him.
'Steady, Jackn' he said. s'Keep cool,
and l will save YOU"
The men on the deck of the Northern
Light" hauled away on the line, and the
two men at last reached the deck, just alive
This was Caspar Wade's revenge The
time has come when he can take the chill
dren of Jonn Dean and Edna Dean upon
his knee, and tell them the story of that
hour of peril For they are his dear friends,
and will be till the gates of the tomb open
for them or for him.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

Among the jewels prese nted by Lord
Rosebery to his intended wife, Miss Roths-
child, was the largest sapphire known. 1t
was brought to England some time ago in
its rough state, and for long time remained
unstable, as the dealers fancied they saw
in it flaw. At length one more coura e.
taking all the risk. On being sent to the
polishers, it was found that the defect was
barely skin deep Lord Rosebery paid
$4,000 for it, precisely the same price as
the Duke of Westminster paid some years
ago for the largest known turquoise. The
sapphire is about the size of a large walnut
the turquoise, a fiatter stone, has some
what larger surface.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

VARIOUS COLORs FOR GRASSES.
whiten grasses: Place them in cone over
burning sulpher. To color red Take car
mine, quarter of an ounce; liquor ammonia,
one half ounce; water, quarter of pint.
To color blue: Indigo dissolved in sulphuiie
acid, neutralized with whiting To color
yellow: Solution of turmeric in spirits OF
wine. To color violet: Archil, and above
blue. To color lilac: Archil in boiling
water. To color green: Dye first light
blue by diluting the blue with one hall
water, and then use the yellow. Dye the
grasses by dipping them into these solutions
Colors may be brighted by first dipping in
to water containing cream of tartar, and
drying.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

Massachusetts, was the first State in the
American nion to establish normal schools,
of which there now are 1877, with over 80,
900 pupils and over 1000 instr uctors Ohio
and Penns ylvania each having twelve
schools, while New York State has nine,
Illinois and Missouri eight each, and Mas
sachusetts seven. The largest number of
pupils are in New York, however, where
there are 4,15S. The necessity of such
schools needs no other enforcement than a
few statistics relating to education in the
United States. Nearly 100000 scholars
are enrolled in the public schools. Nearly
100000 are in attendance daily. and about
231, 900 teachers are employed, including
900 women. The amount expended
annually upon this vast scheme, which
seems almost fabulous, is about $50, 600, 900,
and the imagination is carried away by the
tremendous suggestiveness of the figures.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

An old darkey who was asked if in his
experience prayer was ever answered, re-
piled: "well, sab, some pra ars is ansud an
some isn't-'pends upon wat you axes fo'
Just arter de wah, zen it was mighty hard
scratchin' fo' de cullud bredden, 'bsarve
dat w'enebber pway de Lord to sen one OF
Marse Peyton's fat turkeys fo' de ole man,
dere was no notice took of de partition; but
wen pway dat he would sem de ole man
TO- de turkey, de matter was tended to be-
fo' sun-up mex mornin', dead sartinv'
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

The one that attracted the most atten
tion at the st. Louis dog fair, was Lulu, a
brindled Scotch deerhoune, years of age.
He is of the Sir Walter Scot breed, and i'm
ported from the kennels of Queen Victoria.
Mr.. Whitman's (of Chicago) selling price is
the enormous amount of $4,000. His fine
head, bright, intelligent eyes and graceful
gait were objects of general remark, and
everyone was anxious to get glimpse of
the $50,0 dog.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

A gentleman travelling through one of
the most picturesque portions of the White
Mountain region saw farmer at work,
and, being of sociable disposition, ap-
preached the man and expatiated on the
beauty and majesty of the surrounding seem
cay, concluded with the remark, 81 suppose
my friend, you enjoy this glorious view,
that people come so far to look at ?'' "Why,
yes" was the response; "but if I'd had the
sortin' Of the hills, I'd made 'em little
peakeder."
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

ADDRESS TO THE TOOTAACHE,

My curse upon thy venomed stang,
That shoots my tortured gums alang;
An though my lugs gies mony a twang,
WI gnawing vengeance!
Tearing my nerves wi bitter pang,
Like racking engines.
When fevers burn, or ague freezes,
Kheumatics gnaw, or cholic squeezes,
Our neighbor's sympathy may ease US,
Wi pitying moan;
But thee thou hell o a diseases:
Aye mocks our groan.
Adown my beard the slavers trickle;
l throw the wee stools Ger the mickle,
As round the fire the giglets keckle
To see me loup:
While, raving mad, / wish heckle
Were in the doup.
q a the numerous human dools,
Ill har' 'sts, daft bargains, Guilty stools,
Or worthy friends raked i the moods,
Sad sight to see!
The tricks o knaves or fash O. fools,
Thou bear'st the gree
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

The HUMAN EAR.-Probably no portion
of the human anatomy is so delicate, sensi
tive, and at the same time so capricious in
it's action as the human ear. We have
known a woman who could stand up in the
garret, looking out of a dormer window,
and hear her husband kiss the hired girl in
the cellar, eight rooms and two flights of
stairs away, and the next night that very
same woman would take her baby to church
and hold it on her lap while it screamed and
howled fifteen minutes of the sermon into
oblivion, and be astonished when she was
told that her dear child had been crying.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21
AFTER MANY DAYS.

The words of truth are never lost. lik
long buried seed, they will bloom forth a
last. A youth Of fifteen once heard the Gel
ebrated Flavel preach plain, powerful ser
mon, from which he received no mmediat
impressions. Soon after he came to Amer
ica-where he lived to be a hundred year
of age-a thoughtless careless old man
One day, while sitting alone under a tree
his past life came vividly before him, ano
over the hills of memory, clear as the blu
above him, rose the days of his youth, ant
with them the Sabbath morning when ht
heard the great, solemn Flavel. The ser
mons thrilling words came back to hin
like an alarm-bell over the silent sea of years
awakening every sleeping sin. Startled
and stung by conscience, he was led at last
from deep sense of guilt to forgiving
judge and loving Saviour. He Joined a
neighboring church, and for sixteen years
lived to be consistent follower of Christ,
and then Luke Short died at the age of a
hundred and sixteen years in the glorious
uOpe VI OleSSoQ immortality.
Little thought Flavel that his living words
should echo over the sea of time, across the
ocean between the Old and the New World,
awakening sleeping soul to everlasting
glory.
The seed of truth has wonderous resur-
rection power. Sown in one heart, planted
and transplanted, it lives and grows from
year to year, from century to century.
Binney sat alone and wrote his book of
Christian experience-full of thoughts born
in prayer and baptised in tears. One of it's
printed copies some careless hand had torn
and thrown aside, and Richard Baxter
CHANGED to pick up the old torn leaves, and
read enough of truth to lead him at last to
feel the evil of sin, and to find peace and
hope, and he wrote his ''Call to the uncon
verted,' which Doddridge read, and was
awakened and saved, and many other sleep
ers his solemn call aroused from their death
slumber, and many saints by him were
helped to reach their everlasting rest; and
Doddridge saved through Gods help by
Baxter, wrote his Rise and Progress, which
led William Wilberforce to Christ, and
Wilberforce wrote his Practcle View, which
led Thomas Chalmers to be truly converted,
while himself preaching an unknown Christ.
Let no preacher think his true, earnest
words lie Theoretically sealed and dead in the
vase of some hardened soul They live
even in the dust of memory's tomb. As
the Danish poet tells US, the flower upon the
earth grows at night time; so, in times
dark, the flower of truth may grow unseen.
Christian htslJigencer.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

The Rev. Joseph Cook was about 16 years
old when he delivered his first lecture.
From earliest boyhood he had passion for
delivering addresses. He was born neal
Ticonderoga, his parents being plain coun-
try people. His full name is Flavius Jose
phus, and until he grew up he was known as
"Flave." On becoming man he dropped
the ''Flavius," nobody knew exactly why.
When he was quite a lad he wrote a history
of Ticonderoga, which was published in the
village newspaper. His discourses are now
more extensively published than those of
any other preacher in this country.
West-Jersey pioneer., 1878-03-21

There is some excitement in Cedar Creek
township, Allen county, Indiana, over
hold outrage committed there a few days
ago. Some tramps went into the house of
Benedict Schlatter, while his wife was out
of doors, and took from the cradle her in
FAINT child, about five months old. One of
the brutes took the baby in his arms but
was pursued by the mother, who overlook
him at the distance of about mile knocked
him down with a club, and took her child
home.