The Waco daily examiner. [volume] (Waco, Tex.) 187?-1888, 1878-10-20
LA CREME DIES CHRONIQUEs.
What the Alleged Wits of Paris
Find to Say in their Papers.

ale is well fixed" said one young
man of another ; she has no need OF
deaths in the family"
The Judge-Prisoner, you have
heard the evidence, which shows be-
yond doubt that you opened your
employers safe with false keys and
stole his money. What could have
induced you to do such thing2
Prisoner-I couldn't help 1t, sir.
You know what the proverb says
Hunger makes the wolf come out
of the bush.'
The Jndge-Silence, sir! You
should be ashamed to offer such an
excuse. Hunger may make the vol
come out of the woods, but it does
not make him open his employers
safe with false keys. i will hold you
in 100000 bail.
Simple servant-maid--1t's funny,
mama, how much more oil your
lamp burns in winter than in sum-
mcr, and yet it is always put out at
1880, and light ii at the same time,
summer and winter.
Mistress-At the same hour, sum
mer and winter?
5. S. m--Yes'm; the moment it be-
gins to get dark.
At the Barriere du Trone, Y. halls
hack and says to the driver, "Drive
me TO Auteuil."
"To Autenil ---- my
ewes to ----!' replies the dis
gusted coachee.
Come, let us reason together"
SAYS p, pleasantly. "Suppose you
were not a coachman and you found
yourself here, and you wanted to go
TO Auteuil, what would you do I'M
der similar circumstances leave 1t
to yourself, now Z"
"Why, I'd hire hack, but |
wouldn't take this one" yells the
driver.
Captain to high private in the re-
serye-Iou are supposed to be SEN
tinel on the advanced line, and you
see one of the enemy coming to-
wards YOU, bearing a white flag.
What would you do? .....
Defender of the country-Flre ON
him and fall back on the picket.
They were playing at cards, when
all of sudden the game was inter-
rupted, angry words passed and the
players rose:
"See here, you're holding altogeth-
er too many aces"
"What do you say sir 7"
81 say you are swindler."
81 will call you to account for this
objectionable insult"
II am at your service at any time"
Here is my card, SIR" (Throws
down, by mistake, another ace which
he draws from his pocket.)
Pleasant domestic interior; hus-
band reading, wife knitting.
misunderstanding but politics,
politics, politics. Who cares If the
Centre Gauche has carried the De-
partment of the Doubs by 5000 ma
jority, with several back arrondisse-
ments yet TO hear from2 Let's see
what's on.the next page. (Reads:)
"A duel with small swords took
place yesterday between NJ. g., the
injured husband, and NJ. H., the OBJ
icct of his hatred. M. G. was killed
by thrust through the lung"
liumph! that isn't any funnier than
the politics.
Wife-If were you I'd learn fenc-
ing.
Mile Cora Diamant-I always
thought had liking for the little
fellow, but it was only when he gave
me this love of a carriage that felt
that my heart had spoken.
Being constantly busy, the worthy
advocate hit upon the brilliant de-
vice, when any one knocked, of open
ing the door and saying he wasn't in.
This ingenious plan succeeded
Wonderfully for u while, till along
came a client who knew him.
What !" said the client, "you say
NJ. \; is not in? Why, you're NJ. X"
That's the way with you people,"
said the worthy lawyer in disgust.
,rlf chit of servant girl had said
wasn't in, you'd have believed her
quickly enough, but when | tell you,
you won't take my word" +
At the restaurant:
iii, waiter; say this turbot isn't
fresh. Why can't you get me some
IKE that | had the day before yes
terpay ?"
That's where you fool youaself,
SNay-,its of the same fish. Got you