Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-10-27
Humorous Items.

nuWOFOuS lCcllSs
| Fish are often in-seine.
The air apparant-Thick fog.
Woman's writes--Postscripts.
A taking person The policeman.
A prickly pair--Needlcs and pins.
New version--Vox Pop, you lie.
A smashing business stones.
A popular field officer-A kernel of
wheat.
Tramps have not refused to take trade
| dollars
1t Is wise man who knows his own
umbrella.
| Little darkies in Florida are called al
ligator Dlackberries
A light garment for warm weather.
The close of the day.
Now then, all together! Who ever saw
a knee-grow2 Help! Help!
A book is mans best friend. and the
only one he can shut up without giving
offense.
"This is quite ram in essence" said
the man as he fell with his arm in lar
Of vanilla
To blow out a kerosene lamp with
safety to yourself-Get somebody else to
do the blowing.
When an irate parent applies the hick-
DRY to his offspring, we suppose he is
polling his issue.''
| You think you may know the ropes
completely, but pretty girl can get you
on string any day.
Send the Indians a ton or two of ncn-
ny whistles, and let's hear no more of
uatootered minds.
Some people are like green Holsters
they never know when to let go when
they shake hands with you.
A niue will behave himself eleven
years and six months just to get one off
hand shot at a middle shirt stud.
When you see man going out with an
umbrella in his hand, you may bet your
little pile it's going to be a clear day.
1t IS the experience Of circus proprie-
tors that one stock Of clowns jokes will
outlast seven sets Of canvas covering.
Why is an auctioneer who sells wom-
an a bottle of cordial a base coward?
Because he knocks her down an elixir.
presume you no longer wish to re-
main in cog" said the man out of the
machinery to the man in the machinery.
When Paul said, ''all is vanit,. y he was
looking straight at q young man wearing
straw hat with 6 blue band around 1t.
A woman can't put ON any side saddle
airs when she goes in swimming. She
has either got to kick out like man or
get drowned
Bow down you head, ye naughty clam;
ye oyster say your prayer, the month
that hath an Il has come; you're on the
bill of fare
| Somebody has discovered that, when
ever the grain is out and hauled in, the
tramp makes his appearance on the stub
ble and demands work or bread.
A beautiful example of "Force of hab-
it" is to see disciple OF Murphy fill his
glass at the hydrant and dreamily blow
the froth off the innocent water before
drinking.
A man will sit on picket fence ell the
afternoon to see a base ball match, but
put him in church pew three-quarters
of an hour and he will wobble all over
the seat.
In the make up of the modern small
boy there is altogether too much
whistle for the amount Of boy. It is
most too much like using two quart
funnel in three-oun vial.
The New York Herald says: "small
pieces Of sponge soaked in cresote. will
keep away black ants" To keep awav
white aunts, the safest way is to have no
spare bedroom.
The gang Of burglars who work for
seven straight hours to hammer a safe to
pieces to secure fourteen cents know how
a minister feels next day after donation
visit.
Probably the mild-eyed goat is the
only animal ever invented that can eat
twenty-four hours day aud deyour
flour barrel and seven old fruit.cans for
lunch
Sweets to the sweet" said young
man on passing the syrup to young
lady at one Of our hotel tables. And
beets to the beat" remarked the lady.
showing the dish of that vegetable toward
the young man.
Nothing will sooner make mans
eyes shoot fire, his brain wh1rl, and his
heart flop up against lis palate, than to
lose his balance on his available leg while
trying to stow the other away il his dual
garmenture.
Little Fanny's mother, the other even
ing, reading Of the heroism of the gooa
women in the fever-smitten Southwest
was commencing female tortitude.
"Well, WE'LL" cried Fanny, women may
have fortitude, but men have ffty-tude p
Boston Transcript.
A little seven-year-old baseball player,
being told of the recent sad accident and
instant death of the catcher who SO noblv