The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1878-06-22
SATURDAY MORNING. JUNE s2.
buffalo Express Rep.yl
HAYES Still Calm and Coueiltafnrv.

HAYES Still Calm and C0nciiiatOry.
There is probably not man in this world so
thoroughly patient, calm and good, and so firm
10 behalf of the virtues, as President r. d.
Hayes. Last Sunday evening he was taking
Lis usual evening walk, looking complacent
snd hHuming peaceful hymn, when he sud-
oeniy Encountered Bourbon bulldozer with
mask on bis fac and pistol in his right hand,
who said In low, hsa, voice:
"Your money or your liop'
This Is very provoking" responded the
President "You have interrupted me in nv
deyotions beg that you will allow me to
finish the verse was singing. One sweetly
solemn"
snow you hush upp' said the man SEVERELY
what do you take me for? I'm Southern
er, sir, and not given to nonsense. Your
money or your lifer'
II am very sorry, sir,' said the President,
examining his various pockets, "but / have
stupidity left my purse at home. H'm! will
you rot join me in this hymn? Come, my
friend! let us be devotional" He paused as
he noticed the strangers dreadful frown and
added, .Oh, you won't eh? Well, that's bad.
IT you'll accompany me to the White House.
however, will get the purse you desire, and
we shall get along all right after that, I dare
say. One sweetly'-"
He stopped suddenly, for the stranger
grabbed him by the collar and shook him
roughly, at the same time expressing his belief
that he had been guilty of gross falsehood.
NOW, assure you, said the President,
with extreme esrnestness, shat you are mis-
taken, my friend. [ have no money with me,
as true as live. do not blame you for sus-
pecting me, however. People in the situation
ind myself in at the present moment are
very apt to Drevarlcate. 1t naturally creates
broad suspicion against human nature, and
gentlemen OF your profession are excusable
when they suspect the innocent. Pray do not
pinch my ear in that unpleasant manner 1
love You, and wonld do almost anything for
you. Let us conciliate. Let us ioin in singing
the hymn was engaged on when YOU inter,
rupted me, meanwhile walking to my residence
to get the money of which you are doubtless 10
urgent need"
The President would have said much more,
becoming warm and loving and exalting his
patience as he went on; but unhappily the
stranger hit him a blow in the chest which
staggered him and took away his breath.
companying It with a further request for his
money with the usual alternative.
snow stopp remarked the President, as
soon as he had recovered. ST. beg your par
don. do not mean to be rude, but you startled
me. Gentemen--gentlemenP' He called to a
party OF distinguished Democratic representa-.
tives who were passing. "Gentlemen, please
come this way. My friend here doubts whether
am man of truth. You can inform him
that am, and SO relieve me from rather dis
tressng situation. L half suspect he even
contemplates making me mark for the weapon
he carries. Please say that am not given to
false statements"
The distinguished Representatives acted in
most remarkable manner. So far from adj
vancing upon the President, they got to the
extreme outer edge of the walk on the other
side of the street, Mr.. Carkson Potter even
soiling his boots by getting partially into the
ditch, and passed on with elevated eyebrows
and a general expression of cruel contempt.
Bill Springer, and John Goode of Virginia,
turned somersault to get out of sight the
more speedily, and MIR. S. j. Randall and Mr.
Il. s. Bragg turned around and scowled in the
most unpleasant manner imaginable and then
hurried on as II they had lost seconds time
on a small dog.
"Now L never in my lifer' exclaimed the
President with great SURPRISE "After all +
have done and sacrificed for those persons!
wouldn't have believed 1T. Human nature is a
strange thing indeed But never mind They
are not TO be blamed. They have formed
wrong IDEAS as to my veracity, perhaps-aud
who can be blamed for wrong ideas if they are
honestly cherished? No, my dear friend. Let
us be not severe. Let US be patient. Let hs
bs brotherly one to another. We will sing the
hymn beginning One sweetly--"
AT this moment the President felt himself
lifted up and thrown violently to the ground
he was punched in the head and in every avail
able portion of his body. He was stamped on
and sworn at and about. He felt the stranger
searching his pockets and heard him cursing
him because he had told the truth. He suffered
hnal and most vigorous kick, and then he
seemed to be aloLe.
"This-this is quite extraordinary" he said,
rising with much pain and difficulty. ~ do
not wish to use harsh language, but l am quite
surprised. 1t Was really unkind in that gentle
man to suspect me of falsehood. and in those
Democratic Representatives to pass me by in
my trouble, without SO much as as a reoogni.
ton. Fortunately, however, 1 know my duty
just as we'll as if all the world were with me.
shall be patient. l shall be firm. shall
not waver an iota with regard to this policy
One sweetly solemn thought
His voice was as sweet and clear as if there
was no trouble in all the world, though it was
noted as he slowly crept out of of sight that he
needed several additional hands wherewith to
feel gently of his numerous cuts and bruises.