The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-05-02
THE PHONOGRAPH.
An Evening with the Machine IN a
quiet Eome-some Of its Revelations


Burlington Hawkeye: 1t happened
that Mrs. Barstinglow was going down
to Keokuk for q few days, and Mr.. Bar
stinolow was inconsolable. At one time
he protested that she should not go; he
conid not endure the lonesome hours
during her absence. And then again, he
declared that if she must go, he would
neglect his office, and let his business
90 to the bow vows, and he would 60
with her. At length, however, she per-
suaded him to be reasonable, and on her
repeated assurance that she would not
remain away longer than three days, he
consented to let her go. He even bought
her ticket, and ordered the carriage and
paid for two days ahead, lest his resolu-
ton should give away and he should for
bid her going from him. And from that
time till the morning of her departure,
Mr.. BarstingloV spoke in subdued tones,
and moved about with the air of man
whose heart was buried under mountains
of grief.
Before she left the house. she set the
phonograph in the sitting-room, behind
the clock. Then she kissed her discon-
ISOLATE husband, and begged him to
preserve his precious life for her sake
while she was away.
Every day during the three days visit
in Gate City, she received letter from
her mourning husband, begging her to
come back and telling her how lonesome
he was without her, and how like grave
the empty house seemed, and how the
hours were dragging over his aching
head with leaden feet. And in three
days she came home and filled the solemn
house with sunlight and laughter again.
The evening after her retErn to Bur
lington she took down the photograph.
81 wonder" she said, ''what we said
last in It's hearing? 1t must have been
something while we were discussing my
visit Or may be it has caught some of
your poor longing meanings while was
away"
And then she turned the crank.
''No," crooked the photograph, in
tones of hearty reinsurance, ''no danger
of that; she's safe in Keokuk for three
days; saw her safely off, myself, this
morning. Light your cigar while | light
another lamp and mako the room look
cheerful.
"Why," exclaimed Mrs. Barstinglow,
in countenance of amazement, ''what
on earth is it saying?"
"Oh, some nonsense some of your VS.
itors have talked into it some time or
other, replied her husband, nervously;
''people talk all kinds of stuff into a
photograph, you know. They say any
thing for talk.
Mrs. Barstinglow, looking only half
convinced, gave the crank another turn.
''This is good whiskey Barsty," eiacu-
lated the machine, very earnestly. "You
don't get it in Burlington do your
Mrs. Barstinglow gave little shrek.
''Iy DEAR" said her husband, looking
now quite as worried as he had looked
when he was begging her not to go to
Keokuk, "put it away some one has had
it out in the stable, and it might say
something perfectly shocking, you know.
Put it away"
But Mrs. Barstinglow, upon whom the
e 1ol
with great power, ground away, and the
monograph in voice marvelously like
her husbands, went remorselessly on.
mot much; they dontt make this
kind now. It's old Monongahela, copper
distilled, that Mrs. Barstinglows mother
gave her for medical purposes, three
years ago. Fill up there's plenty of it,
and | can replace it with any kind of
beverage when it's gone. The old girl
won't know the difference"
Mrs. Barstinglow felt herself turning
to stone, but the next turn of the crank
brought out an uprorious-
'sHa, ha, hal Here's to the o. g."
That famed her cheek into flame
''For mercy's sake, Malachi Barsting
low" she shrieked "what does this
mean2"
Mr.. Barstinglow now looked as though
he really did wish she had never gone to
keokuk.
.'It's Just as tell you," he said, with
an effort to look unconcerned that was
like humorous book, colossal success,
so far as its utter failure was concerned.
Somebody has been talking all sorts of
nonsense into it just for talks sake.
How else could it get hold of such dread
full stuff in our little home, lovey?"
Mrs Barstinglow didn't say, but she
worked away, and the photograph asked
carelessly:
Throw round for the deall"
She thought she would faint, but she
didn't, and the pitiless machine proceed
ed to remark, with variety of voices:
Its my age" You'll have to strad-
die that blind if you come ill.," Give
me two cards" ''Chip one. I'm see
your little one and raise you couple"
''Push the bottle this way, Ben" "Ain't
you going to stay in Harry?" Cant
stay in on pair of skies" Call you"
1.-Two small pair, kings to head. > Ten
and deuces. Take the pot. "Barsty,
get us something to eat. Old girl left
the cupboard keys, didn't she?'' "Yes;
told her l was going to keep bach, at
home, to save expenses and keep out of
bad company" ''Ha, Ia, la. Ho, no,
"Hh!' yelled Mr.. Barstinglow, unable
TO contain himself any longer, while his
wife. more dead than alive. leaned over