The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1878-02-08
LEGISLATIVE JOKES.
Eem,n,acenee. of robert DaIe owen.

Like most of my colleagues who lived
in remote portions of the state (Indiana),
7 travelled on horseback to attend the
Iaoislature part of the way along bridle-
nsths. sometimes swimming creeks, or,
f we were fortunate enough TO find
canoe. depositing therein saddles and
and trailing our horses,
swimming behind. A trunk for those
who INDUCED in such luxury was sent
on by carrier.
TIE legislature was composed chiefly
of farmers. plain, honest, genial men,
With q few sharp witted lawyers and
other professionals often taking promi-
nent parts. Now and then | could not
torbear smile at the ignorance, espe-
ciallv in common facts in science, that
sometimes peeped out. The hall IN
which we met being often irregularly
heated by two large cast-iron stoves, my
friend Chris Graham, member from
Warwick county, moved that the door
keener be authorized to buy two Their
nometers go that an even temperature
raight be maintained. ThereupOn an old
farmer from a remote county objected.
He did not know, he said, just what sort
of machines the gentleman wanted TO
Keep Is warm but these Out-oi-the-way
patent contTiyances were always exPen-
siye and he supposed it would need
man to attend 10 each and keep II IN
order: for his part. stove, or what he
liked much Detter-a big wood fire, was
good enough for him.
But, if science was not adequately
represented among Us, sound Judgment
in many practical matters and an earnest
sense of duty were. The venality which
now stains so many of our legislative
bodies was unknown. Economy, occa-
sionaIlv dsgenersting into parsimOny-
was practiced, and | am very sure that
no member went home richer than he
came, except what he may have saved
out of 50 a day after paying expenses.
And they were a lively, genial tody IN
their way. Nothing took better with
them than a merry story or practical
joke. OF the latter, one instance came
very near having a serious result.
il WAS toward the close of the session,
when we were waiting to receive bills
from the senate, with little else TO do
meanwhile. Several young ladies OF my
acquaintance came into the speaker {
lobby, where I then happened TO be.
One of them told me that, few even
ings before, Mr.. Cutter, a young men,
per DAQ LlEUE 10 Llitlll a cOACLliu kAOALAll
that he would introduce a bill taxing
old bachelors, and that they had come
TO rec that he kept his word; would
please tell him 30 did her bidding oil
course.
Now, G. w. Gutter was our poet, anc
one Of no mean order; author of the
celebrated Song Of Steam" beginning
Harness me down with your IRON bands,
BE OF your curb and rein;
For ! scorR the power Of your puny hands,
AZ the tempest sc0rns chain.
Ho ] laughed. as lay concealed from sisnt'
For many countless hour,
At the childish boast Of human might,
Aud the rride Of hunan power
a poem which Blackwood, not overpront
To commend American literature, pro
nounced to be the best lyric of ths
century" It's author afterwards mar
ried the well-known actress, Mrs Drake
many wears his senior.
When | delivered to him the message
from the young ladies, he was at fret In
cliued 20 shirk the matter but. wher
encouraged 10 20 through with 1t, he
drew up bill at once providing that OF
every bachelor over the age OF thirty
there be imposed an annual tax OF $40
the amount TO go TO the school fund.
suggested an amendment which he IN
GOEDDEdltl III MS Dllls LLub AZ
vided, that If such bachelor shall max,
il appear to the satisfaction OF the cour
doing county business that he has twlc'
offered marriage and been twice refused
be shall be exempted from said tax
Then l posted the speaker as 10 whs
we had on hand, and he recognized Cut
ter as soon az he rose. The rules were
suspended and the bill was read twice
Thereupon we had jovial debate, inter
spersed with all manner of gibes agains
bachelors. One speaker opposed th'
bill.
We have adopted the ad-valoren
system" he argued ;" we tax according
10 intrinsic values. Therefore, we i'm
pose no tax on the contents Of the rag
bag, or the chips in the wood yard; why
then, on an article 50 utterly useless L
society IS an old bachelor ?"
Finally, the rules again suspended, W.
actually passed the bill rather taken by
surprise, when the vote was announced
at what we bad done, and q little con
cerned as to how our constituents nigh
take it. But we were in no mood L
reconsider the vote. So we urged thu
clerk TO report to the senate at once
Then having adjourned the house, We
followed, accompanied by the younl
ladies, t. see the result.
The spirit OF frolic is infectious. tn,
senate took up our bill; it was read ;
first and second time, and put on it
passage Then two or three Of the NOR,
grave and reverend seigniOrs made {
serious stand against it; and, finding th'
tide for the time too strong against them
avsiled themselves OF the Iateness of thu
hour to procure an adjournment of thu
senate. Next day it WAS laid on tn
table by a small majority.
atterward asked our governor if b.
would have signed ii.
Why not?" he replied. " see n
improperly in the bill and, as to it
expediency, you gentlemen of the hous
and senate would have been responsible
fur that. Robert Dale Olren, IN Scr,b