Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-11-17
won't come back already airy more; she's
gone to STAY: she's 1et.''

| Won't come back already arv more; she's
| gone to stay; she's det.'
A mother was trying to break her FIVE
year-old boy of a habit of lying by tell
| Ing him that all liars went to hell She
gave him moving account of the te1rors
OF the place. whereupon he exclaimed:
why, mother, couldn't stan it, .sBut
you womb be made to stand it" said she.
ON well" said the youngster, sif I
could stan it don't care.'
spa" said youthful rustic. rising from
picking up apples and softly rubbing his
back against the tree, ST ken do Them
slighthand p'formenses: when I grow mn
I'm goin' to be prestidigitstern "Hm.h
replied the paternal with vehement con-
tempt; "you keep to work. Bout next
month you'll be pressed to dig q later up
IN the corner "--Graphic.
Very young-very polite, but very
nerVous-he trod on a ladys foot as he en-
| tered the car.
"a thousand pardons, Have I hurt
you!'
'Not at all, sir.''
Il am very sorry.'
a moments reflection, and nervous
ness set IN and everybody seemed pleas
ed but him.
Il aw dreamed last night" said he to
her whom be bored greatly by his atten-
lions. THAT laid in wait for man witt,
an immense sum of money, and Knocked
his bwalns out. and then ROBBED him OF
his wealth" "There would have been
more merit in the theft ii you had stolen
the brains" replied she. Gweat heavens,
What would have done with them?n She
gave 1t up.
Boston transcript: A Courtship scene.
George--Oh, Angelina! idol of my
being star of my souls existence, On.
an Angeline--
Oh, dearest An! no.
- - How nice.
ust one more, - tOld man
enters suddenly I. 2
Il s" (Oh. pa,
don'p! But he did.
client said to his LAWYER true,
,,, Take these notes, and not paid. sue EN-
III do it; you shall have every cent that's due:
As Blackstone says, We'll soc ct III um.
A young man who had been expected
Tor some time to propose but whose
dittidence had kept him back, was aston
lshed by his father saying to him, as he
set OH for his sweetheart's residence one
evening, John, you'd better take the
screwdriver along with you this time
What tor?" exclaimed John. so as to
screw up your courage little" answered
patef. When John came home that night
he said, I've done it father
On the day of ar eclipse, when the in
habitants OF Vienna were without doors.
provided with telescopes and pieces OF
smoked glass, an Engishman was seen
driving furiously in iarce along one Of
the principal streets.
s'Where does my lord wish to go?" said
the driver
ITO see the eclipse!' exclaimed the
Engllshman, thrusting his head out of
the coach window; "only drive up as near
as possible, for am short sighted.
This is the way in which contempora-
ry goes for my Gran lfather's Clock
MY grandfather's Clock" it was all very
| well.
When the song was first coming out:
But twas whistled and sung, Till It's numbers
nov swell
Upon ears that are all tired out
1t is whistled and hummed out Of time, out Of
tune.
With an infinite feeling OF pride,
Till we all OF us wish that the song had
stopped short
When the Old man died.
Husband "Why not take that dress,
dear. and have done with it?" Wife
with cutting irony --"Certainly darling,
if you don't mind tie expense Of having
the drawing room refurnished." Husb-
and Drawing room refurnishcd?" Wife
We'll, yes: you can ha9,dLg expect me
! to sit on a red sofa in a magenta dress;
and should have thought that it was
more economical to have dress to SUR
the room, than to have a room altered TO
suit the dress. But you know best of
course.' Husband collapses.
a very rich old man who had married
young wife, died suddenly, upon which,
the widow rayed like maniac. and ex-
claimed TO the doctor, who stood by the
bedside of the departed, 80, I'll not be-
lieve that my dear partner is dead: he
could not die and leave me! No, no,
he's alive. I'm sure he's alive: tell me,
doctor, don't you think so?" Madam, "
replied the medical man, with much
gravity, II confess that I have the means
by which he may be revived. I will ap-
ply the galvanic battery so, no, nor'
cried the grief stricken widow lizard
as 1t IS to bear my fate, | will have no ex-
periments against the laws Of nature
Let him rest in peace"