Daily Los Angeles herald., 1878-06-27
Eos Sugeles Nerald.
An Hour at the Central Station Court.

The old man was oiliEg the hinges
OF the stove door and carelessly
sang one of Beethoven's best, when
: middle-aged woman entered the
station and began:
"hIr. Joy, are you q good man q'
avail, tOlerable-tolerable," he |
replied. az never dropped bad
nickel into the street car box, and
/ don't 60 fishing on Sunday"
sMr. Joy, I am canvassing for
money to buy Bibles, and SO forth,
for the African heathen," she con-
tinued as she exhibited q pass
book.
fare, eh! Does he seem to want
Bible?n
HE does. He sits on the sands
Of his native shore and looks long
ingly this way.n
HDoes, ehl Sitting right there
this morning, I suppose?"
"He is. How much will you SUBJ
scribe, Mr.. Joy?"
MADAME, I've got to lift a mort
gage before noon to-day, and"
HYou win certainly give SOM
thing,n she interrupted.
"And I've got to meet fire and
life insurance, pew rent, taxes, gas
and"
"Put down what your noble heart
Dictates she said, as she handed
him the book. i,
He reflected for a moment and
then asked:
"Will five dollars convert q
heAthen-a great big two-f1sted
heather, with q stiff knee 2"
"I-I think so."
He figured with pencil on the
bottom Of q chair and said:
fsFive dollars into two hundred
pounds Of heather is forty pounds
for . dollar. That Is, less see-um
ten pounds for twenty-five cents,
and none to carry. Divide the
dividend by the divisor, cut Oft the
cube root, carry nothing, and,
madam, you take this quarter and
convert ten pounds of heather for
me. That's all can spare-no use
tsikiBE-tea reunds-here comes
his Honor"
She went away puzzled and
amazed ut his figures, and Bijah
looked after her and mused;
81 ought to have taken g mort
gage on my share of that heather
but Pm just that careless in bust
ness affairs"
THE LONG AGO.
Beverly Smith walked out OF cell
No. 6, with the greatest prompt
ness, and as he ranged before the
desk and smiled, he said:
Well, this is indeed asurprise'
Why, hadn't the remotest idea Of
finding you here! Shake, old fell
low"
His Honor wouldn't.
"Don't you remember your old
schoolmate Bev Smith," inquired
the prisoner. Don't you remem-
Der how we use to steal melons to-
gether-how we both went over
the mill-dam in an old bOat-how
we read novels under the lee side
Of haystacks:n
A strange light crept into His
Honor's eyes as he replied:
"Ah! remember you now SO
you are Bev Smith ?"
''I AMI am. l thought you'd
remember me. Pm awful glad to
see you, Judge. Are you we'll ?'
ssQuite we'll, thank you"
An awkward silence followed
Nj. Smith heard the boys chuck
ling, and he at length said:
"Glad to hear it, yes, yes.
should like to call on you and talk
over old times.
Beverly Smithv' said the courl
in q voice resembling the distant
explosion of coal cart, "you are
now about to call on the Superin'
tendent of the House of Correction
there to remain for ninety long
days."
aWhat! Sentence an old com
panionv
"All the same, Beverly-all the
same. The friends of my child
hood are few in number. They are
falling down stairs, being drowned
blown up and run over, and I'm
going to put you where you will bt
safe from accidentu'
"Don'f, JudgeW
"But will! 1 prize you. Bever
ly. When night comes l want t
know that you are in out of th,
wet, and when morning dawns
want to feel that you are safe from
the clutch of ice wagons. The SEN
tence is recorded"
"Judge, I-I-dont think 1 evel
knew youW stammered Beverly,
but there was q light in the win.
dow for him.
SURGICAL"
Henry Hatterson's eyebrows
were heaviest in the. middle, and
there were several other piratical
landmarks scattered through his
makeup. AS he had given his oc-
cupation as surgeon, the Court
asked:
"Prisoner, are you regular sur
geon?"
"Yes," was the gruff reply.
"What branch OF surgery do you
practice?"
~ dissect CHECKER after they are
roasted?" was the calm reply.
The court deliberately bit into a
fig, pulled half of it away at one
bite, and when he had wiped off
his chin he calmly replied:
$50 do I. Such chickens as you
get dissected about ninety days
worthv'
The prisoner went into tie cor
fidor, spit on the cleanest spot on
the floor, and called Biah "a
hypocritical old Swiss cheese"-