Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1878-10-30
The Jokers' Column.


/
/ lie winds hts mellow horn
Safe In his hunting bag he packs
4 little bottle built of Tin.
Inc which with many hearty smaeks
ne PACKS his ammunition in
/ Aud lest his ,rusty towing piece
Sho Id fal him when the chase was lonc
| lie takes, his safety to increase
HIS pocketpistol, HAT, but strong
Although no game he hrinneth home
lie makes the feathers ly all day;
Ana m"orhens see, AS far they roam
me cocktails that he puts AWAY
when night comes brooding DER the wales.
,noush wound or fracture he has not,
oy the scent his breath exh les,
we Know he is three. uarlers shot
1T takes two properly to enjoy a can
vass-back duck. l. You. .. The duck
Speaking of the dead languages
professor" inquired the new student,
who killed them?"
There is no disgrace in being poor
the thing is to keep it quiet and not let
your neishbors know ANYTHING about il.
There is n LAWYER down east so ey-
cessively honest that ne puts his flower
pots out overnight, so determined is he
that every thing shall have its dew.
\ western editor thus kindly alludes
10 n contemporary: He is Young vet.
but he can sit ut his desk and brush
cobwebs from the ceiling with his
ears"
81 AM Standing yelled the orator
ION the sacred soil Of liberty" lyon
are Standing" yelled his creditor, "on
the soles of pair of boots you haven't
paid me for"
The gang of burglars who work for
seven straight hours to hammer a safe
to pieces 10 secure fourteen cents know
now country minister feels next day
after donation visit.
81 am going to Alaska," said gen
tleman to his friend. "Indeedv' re-
marked the friend, land does your
wife approve of it?' "Don't know"
replied the other, "but Alaska"
The Chinese Encyclopedia meets
long-felt want, and no family should be
without it. 1t is published at Pekin, in
o,o2o volumes, and at the price of ST.
900 is the same as given away. "Get
the best"
PRISONER, do you wish to. say any
thing in your Defense" Nothing,
your Honor, except this-lemme OF
light; this is the eighth time I've been
up before you. We're old copartners,
as it WERE"
If it takes one hog to make ham,
how many hogs will it take to make
hammer ?"--Er. He, he, he Here's
another one: If it takes one egg to make
an nogg, how many eggs will it take to
make an auger ?-S. Louis Dispatch.
A NORWICH tenant has been impor-
tuned SO frequently for his rent that in
a climax OF evaporation, the other day,
he turned on the landlord with the CO.
gent and conclusive retort; "Now you
needn't put on so many airs, old man.
Why, owe enough in this town to buy
up all your old houses"
| A YANKEE auctoneer lately INDUCED
in the following little bit of the pathetic.
Gentlemen, if my father and mother
stood where you do, and didn't buy these
boots--these elegant boots--when they
were going for one dollar, should feel
it my duty rs son to tell both of 'em
that they were false to themselves and
false to their country"
ONE day last week young man who
was thinking of buying farm out in
Nebraska, was looking at an outfit be-
fore nc started West. He rather liked
the clerical appearance of the bay mule,
and pulled It's tail to see if it was gentle.
About four o'clock in the morning, he
opened his eyes and said to his sister,
who was bending over his couch: ASK
the man what they load them with dy-
Mantle for?" And when they asked
the man he cried so hard he couldn't
answer
TINS from an Eastern paper is good,
If it is II little late: The terrible scourge
Of croquet is sweeping over the vast,
illimitable, changing West like a cy-
clone, and the other day, beautiful
girl in Peoria, with silken curls that
held the sunshine in their tangled mesh
es, and soft blue eyes that opened wide
in sweet surprise if you praised their
tender light, and that melted IN tears at
the voice of distress, and red, sensitive
lips that quivered and trembleG with
pain at harsh word or a cold look, and
n voice as soft as the notes Of far-otf
flutes upon the moonlit waters, got away
behind in a very exciting game, and
when her brother caught her cheating,
she opened her soft, blue, melting eyes
in sad surprise, and hit him such ter
rible diff over the head with II mallet
that it was nearly week before he
could tell whether to wear his hat on
his head or the lump.
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New Suspension Bridge ut Niagara.
Niagara Falls Gazette.