The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-01-12

takes me aside by the button-hole and
says:
Give me agates for nv meat;
Give me canthsrids to eat;
from air and oceans bring me foods,
From all zones and ATTITUDES"
Says L; "Mr. Emerson, if you'll ex-
cuse me, this amt no hotel" You see
1t sort of riled mel warn't used to the
ways of literary swells. But went on
sweating over my work, and next comes
Mr.: Longfellow and button-holes me
ana interrupts me. Says he:
"Honor be to Mudiekeewis
You shall hear how Pau-Puk Keewis-"
But broke in, and says I: Begging
your pardon, Mr.. Longfellow, if you'll
be so kind as to hold your yawp for
about five minutes and let me get this
grub ready, you'll do me proud" Well,
sir, after they'd filled up set out the JUG.
Mr.. Holmes looks at it, and then he
fires up all of sudden and yells:
''Flash out a stream of blood-red wine!
For would drink to other days"
BY George! | was getting kind of
worked up. | don't deny it, | was get
ting kind of worked up. | turned to
Mr.. Holmes, and says |: ''Looky here,
my fat friend, I'm running this shanty;
and if the court knows herself you'll
take whisky straight or you'll go dry"
| Them's the very words L said to him.
| Now, | didn't want to sass such famous
literary people, but you see they kind
of forced me. There ain nothing on
reasonable bout me; l don't mind
posse of guests a-tread' n on my coat-tail
three or four times, but when it comes
to standing on it, it's different, and If
the court knows herself you'll take
whisky straight or you'll 90 dry"
Well, between drinks they'd swell
around the cabin and strike attitudes
and spout Says Mr.. Longfellow:
"This is the forest primeval"
Says Mr. Emerson:
"Here once the embattled farmers stood,
! And fired the shot heard round the world"
Says |: sob, blackguard the prem
Uses as much as you want tot don't
cost you a cent" Well, they went on
drinking, and pretty soon they got out
a greasy old deck and went to playing
cut-throat eucher at ten cents corner
on trust begun to notice some pretty
suspicious things. Mr.. Emerson dealt,
looked at his hand, shook his head,
says:
s. / am the doubter and the doubt
And calmly punched the hands and
went to shutting for a new layout.
Says he:
They reckon i'll who leave me out;
They know not well the subtle ways
L keep. pass and deal dgdinr'
Hang'd if he didn't 90 ahead and do
it, too! Oh, he was cool one! Well,
in about minute things were running
pretty tight, but all of sudden | see
by Mr.. Emerson's eye that he Judged he
had 'em. He had already corraled two
tricks and each of the others one. So
now he kind of lifts little in his chair.
and says:
i tire of globes and aces
Too long the game is Played"
and down he fetched right bower.
Mr.. Longfellow smiles as sweet as pie
and says:
=, hanks, thanks to thee, my worthy friend,
and dog my yea catRga s II taIg!ght' -,,,, :,
with another right bower! Well, sir,
up jumps Holmes, war-whooping as
usual, and says:
"God help them if the tempest swings
The pine against the paint"
and | wish | may 90 to grass if he
didn't swoop down with ANOTHER right
bower! Emerson claps his hand OH his
bowie, Longfellow claps his on his re-
volver, and | went under bunk. There
was going to be trouble; but that mon
strous Holmes rose up, webbing his
4 h., : n.ln
gentlemen; the first man that draws IL
lay down on him and smother himn'
All quiet on the Potomac, you bet!
They were pretty how-come-yOu-so
now, and they began to blow. Emer-
son says: "The incest thing l ever
wrote was Barbara Frietchie ~ Says
Longfellow "It don't begin with my
Biglow Papers" Says Holmes: my
'Thanatopsis' lays over 'em BOTH
They mighty near ended in fight.
Then they wished they had some more
company-and Mr.. Emerson pointed at
me and says:
SIS yonder squalid peasant all
That this proud nursery could breedE'
He was a-whetting his bowie on his
boots-so let it pass. Well, sir, next
they took it into their heads that they
would like some music; so they made
me stand up and sing "When Johnny
comes marching home" till | dropped
at thirteen minutes past four this
morning. That what I've been through,
my friend, WhenI woke at seven they
were leaving, thank goodness! and Mr..
Longfellow had my only boots on, and
his own under his arm. Says l: "Hold
on, there, Evangeline; what are you go
ing to do with them?" He says: So Go
ing to make tracks with 'em; because
"Lves of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime;
And, departing, leave behind us
Foot prints on the sands of time"
As said: "Mr. Twain, you are the
fourth in twenty-four hours-and I'm
going to novel amt suited to lit
terry atmosphere"
said to the miner: "Why, my dear
sir, those were not the gracious singers
to whom we and the world pay loving
reverence and homage, these were i'm.
posters"
The miner investigated me with 9
calm eye for while, then said he
"Ah! impostors, were they? are yoa?
| did not pursue the subject; and since