Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1878-11-29
ALL SORTS.


The mercantile marine of the entire
world consists of 81, 900 vessels.
What kind of pudding does q
lawyer preferP Suet pudding, of course.
BODY snatcher:' No. We do not
know where Adam and Eve are buried.
Chicago Times.
"A little girl of our acquaintance
calls her impecunious lover Z" Life" be-
cause he is short"
Some dentists assert that eight
children out of ten inherit the fathers
teeth, not the mothers.
"A Syracuse man calls his wife
Poor Rule" because she won't work
more than one way, and usually not
that.
Some Alabama people, believing
that horses were not made to be rid
den, have formed an anti-equestrian
society.
One of the articles shipped from
India to China is salted rats, which are,
as is well known, highly appreciated in
China as an article of food.
"A Pittsburg man has manufactured
glass speaking trumpet. Isn't this
rather a novelty, when man throws
tones with glassP- Hdo0b-E Eye.
A seaside belle left her bathing
shoes hanging out of her hotel window
to dry, and the next day the local pa
per announced "that such a hotel had
put up new awnings of an unique de-
sign"
The prices of some articles are IS
per cent. lower than before the war.
Corn has not been so low since 1915,
excepting in 1861, cotton not so low in
twenty-three years, and mess pork not
since 1874.
-" Please give me your definition of
cautious man. A bet is pending.
JOHN.n A cautious man, John, is a
man who will tell red-headed woman
that her hair is auburn. If you win,
send the cigars along.
Elder sister: "Well, dear, did you
have pleasant time at the theater to-
nightP'' YouRger ditto: 40, it was
Just lovely! l cried all the time"
Elder sister: "Did youP o, how I
wish I'd been therer'
An aristocratic papa, on being re-
quested by q rich and vulgar young fell
low for permission to marry lone of
his girls" gave this rather crushing re-
ply; Certainly; which would you
prefer, the waitress or the cookP'
-"Yes," said young lady,w was
possessed of fine voice, 81 am often
asked to appear in public, but
"But whatP" observed a friend.
"Well," she replied. 81 should never
be able to sustain my part. am so
easily decomposed."
Boston policemen are compelled to
wear leather collars, the intention being
to make them hold up their heads in a
soldierly manner; but the leather rubs
their chins, and the constraint grows
exceedingly irksome after few hours.
The policemen complain loudly, but
the commissioners say that something
is necessary as a check on the tendency
to slovenliness.
The surgeon-in-chief sent for one
of his junior assistants, who, Fastening
to his superior's presence, found him
just sitting down to a superb roast fowl
and a delicious pate. "Ah, Smith,
cries the chief, have you breakfasted
yetP" "No, DOCTOR" replied the as.
sistant, radiantly. "Then go and get
your breakfast and come back; you will
have lots of time
Once upon atime, when boarding
round'' was the rule in Vermont school
districts, one man had to board the
J teacher lust two and half days. Or
the third day, as the teacher sat dowr
to dinner, the man of the house said
Madam, l suppose your boarding time
will be out when you have eaten half {
dinner; but as / don't wish to appear
mean, you may eat nearly as much a.
usual -
The chief of the voudoo doctors il
Louisiana is a tall colored man nameC
Anderson, half African and half Indian
with very long hair and whiskers. He
is intelligent, shrewd, and has smat
tering of medical knowledge; but h,
flourishes by exciting and pandering I,
the superstition of the negroes, who re
! gard him as a veritable Satan in human
l form. He sells charms for protection
against disease and witchcraft, ant
credulous white persons are among th'
purchasers. 1t is thought by some tina
! he has professed supernatural power
r until he really believes it himself.
"A young bride, momentarily ex
pecting the return of her husband, wa
handed a telegraphic dispatch, whicl
: so excited her that, without havin,
! strength to break the envelope, sh
tainted away. Upon recovering sh
: found her husband seated beside her
80, Alickr' were her first words, -
: thought you had fallen down and Gu
your throat with one of those horri
standing collars"
A New York "modiste' has writ
. ten pamphlet on the Art of Dress
ing" That isn't the book the time
I demand. What the young men VIII
come home at 2:l5 a. m. want is luci
! instructions in the art of undressing
= And if such a work could be supple
mented with a few hints on practices
! methods of distinguishing the foot {
e the bed from the end where the pillow
= are, it would have an immense sale.-
q : Ha10b-Eye.
v 1.-The Women's Suffrage Society,
v saws the London Atbengatnl, are callin
: on such women as have distinguishe
!. themselves as authors, artists, doctors
q schoolmistresses to express in fe
d lines their conviction that the sutfrae
d ought to be extended to all unmarrie
" women who are rate-payers. The 81
y ciety is publishing these in the form {
is leaflets, and it has already obtaine
,e answers from large number of won
II en- whose names are honorably befoi
the world"
III The prison discipline of Californ
in is pronounced the worst in the worl
of One of the delegates to the Constit
~ tional Convention, who is also one
re the leading lawyers of the State, sa
at that you enter the State prison, al
sd are received by "a gentlemanly trust
es who probably offers you cigar. Pas
ne ing on, you find yourself in a flow
ia garden, where the music of birds gree
he Your ear. You imagine you are ente
es ing a palace, instead of a prison. The