The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1878-03-12


They blow Q good deal sbont dianosds
in Arisons; bat ve saw fellow get Ten 81
en- With spade, the other day.
vyheoever . Nanhall man gets thrse
drinks in him, be begins 70 talk shout The
railroad, and when be gets six b ruas out
into the street and tries 70 whistle like q
locomosive.
"A the Christmas stock show Quesa
Victoris took the 6st prise for pisl
What next! She he's already raised
Whalea
"A young lady in Iowa recently
whipped ost IN incipisnt cooaagratios
With her stockinss.
Wooder II abe wants fellow to run viii
"them hoseY
When . church is burning, what i
IL: The: only part that rum no chance Of heinz
We do.'t like to b personal, bat hanged
il We don't believe it, the members.
The mysterious marks On The walls oi
. certain eeutleman's dining room In Je6es.
son have been explaised. The young
ladies had b~en reading the papers and vsss
emulatins Soldene.7JG CSs 1F3sse.
Soldene has nothing to do With wslls
She kicks square to the ceiling. And moth
ing on earth could ever get . JED. City
girl's foot 70 the ceiling except . derrick.
WIN. johnson weighed IS steess las,
week, instead Of 35.-Xayskau Dene1aG
How that man will lie! NJ. Johnsoa may
be q very heavy man, but vhea that papea
says he weighed IS steen, shat kind Of q
Fairbanks does il take % for?
Its awful muddy in Manhall-ses issl
deep or mors. The other night . nan
crossing street stepped On what be thought
va two doon laid down with hitehias
post between them.
"Get OF ny ears you oosg cur" shouted
something between them.
"Whos these!" cried the astonished ps-
destrian.
ats me-Davs Day" va he answer.
And 20 il vas. He va only resting, and
had screwed his ean around sideways "a
keep his head from going under. There
amt much beauty about them, bat when be
works those ears in the court house, you
ought to hear the Psper weights rattle.
A Newport, r. l., Methodist, thor.
oushly warmed up in meeting the other
day, exclaimed: "And tell you what il u,
there Is no use fer any one trying to keep
me from God, for If was shut mp IN .
hole, Praise the Lord"
He wouldn't be the irss man Who had
praised the Lord through . bung-hole.
Three yesrs ago to-day Ne entered The
lorest Of Journalism. And to-day, Ne can
look hack over our journalistic path, andssy
without fear Of contradiction, that during
he interval, we have never suffered ourself
70 Be asked twice to take . drink-AarsRaR
Democrat.
No, you bet. You meyer wait 70 Be asked
NICE, and the barkeepen have to lock up
heir goods in bank sale when hey ~ tie
'hadow Of your foot darkenins the street
-WAxrED-To know Why the winters Of
.798, 1908, 1878, 1923, 1888, l6l8, 1855,
1868 and 1878 should have been - they
AVE been-unusually mild?
Because they we're not severe. Got .
isar!
THE wise daughter il the pride Of he
ather yea, her mother also doth delight
o hes; bat the foolish maiden bringssh soe-
ow." She bangeth her hair over her right
ye she tippeth her hat on The back Of her
cad. When evening cometh she walkesh
q Ohio street, and With her left eye che
lanceth It the patient youth Who cooshsth
q the curhstone and wipeth his nose With
red bandsna. Her handkerchief also b
Len. Then the youth smileth TO himself
nd followeth in her footsteps. She sseseth
snare and scoopeth the wayfacee In.
elah!
But his cry il heard 1t the police o6ce.
nd they sasheseth the maiden to Tie Gala
oose. They searcheth her stocking for Tie
'oleo shekeis. but 10 they ars not thsy
utteth her corset strinss but the dollars Of
ur daddies are not there-ee il they have
cen, she hath gotten away with them and
,e old men too.
I'm California, poplau grow from ten to |
fteen feet in . year.
We plant EN- bottom side up, and make
rtesian wells out Of them, By pulling ths |
~ out and leaving the bark.
"A child, With bean in il vindpipe,
- brought 70 the surgical institute. q In |
some time since. in . dying |
and had actually ceased breath |
q when placed upon The operators tabla.
Something wrong With that bean. They
Re generally - sure - G. d. psFcusioa |
ap; but you must bite o6 The end. liks .
lrtridge, for instant effect.
Ought you to reckon dogs worth By
hat b will fetch, OF what 10 viii bsiagf
We are Interested in this coaundrun.
his wealth i what b will bring. we've
1t the richest old purp in this town. He
i'll bring in 5000 6eas every tsin. and
ever loss passenger.
Sunny Side PiC NiO.
The people Of Sunny SIDE, district No. & vsrs
It for . PIC ME on the sth. !,
The occasion vas the close Of six and hAlf
onths term Of school By Ar. James z Aaus.
good crowd vas present and bouatifal din.es
u promptly discussed as Il %. Thsa followed
q intellectual part Of The eatersainneas - /,
llows: ID
Bunal Of Sir John Moore-by Grant Low.
Drama Of History-by Jennie Loo. Ii
Gen. Scott and the Vetena-by Henry Carver.
Mothers Gone out 90 Dine-NarshAI Low.
Hou 70 Nail 'Em.-Wm- Reaiey Id
The Very Had Boy-Bernard Carna. 9
The Clock on the Naneei-John Low.
AdvantAees Of IN Education-LsEie C1rna.