Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1878-09-12
Btjah's Hour.
Detroit Free Press.
M -

shapeless mass. he received an official
letter from the Board OF Police Commits
sioners which tickled every one Of his
ribs III quick succession. The letter was
to the effect that his increasing age and
care, with due respect for the. great work
he had already done, and desire to see
him take on youthful look around the
chin and ears, had induced the Board to
grant the old janitor leave of absence for
several weeks, pay to go on just the
same.
"Oh! gratitude, where is your stings''
exclaimed the old man as he folded the
letter napkin-fashion and wiped his eyes.
IL any pody had presented me with q
pair of skates I couldn't begin to feel as
do over this"
He though OF the shores Of the moaning sea;
| He Thought of q trip to the West;
In fancy lie hunted the Northern woods,
AS he pulled down his linen vest.
He planned a trip to the Arctit Sea,
And another to Mexico;
And also thought of old Vermont,
Ard her mountains capped with snow.
But the public couldn't spare him. As
soon at it became noised that the old
man meant to walk his feet out of town
for the summer, there was great commo-
ton around the station house.
The children they came and wept sad tears
The women they gasped: "Good-byW
Old men and young extended hand.
And brushed tear from the eye.
And when came to think of his ranch
his resolution was badly shaken. That
one string bean he had carefully tended
and sheltered and protected was almost
ready for eating Two cabbages, strug-
CLING tor place in this sad world, pined
for his assistance. The beets, asparagus
cucumbers and tomatoes seemed calling
him to stay and see the caucus out,
while the onions
Each onion it wept smarting tear
As it softly whispered: "Old man, don't
clear!''
When he had come to consider all
things Rijah decided to remain at home.
Further he made 1t known that he would
devote one hour per day to receiving calls
from people in sorrow and distress and
IN need of sympathy and advice.
PREPARATORY.
Saturday was the day set to receive the
first calls, and during Thursday and Fri
day Bijah was busy with his prepal atoms.
Knowing that he would have to do with
the incorrigible small boy and the big
bad boy, he fitted up spare room at the
station and puton the door the sign: "The
badness spanked out of EN- in here-no
CHARGE" The room is fitted up with a
stout bench six feet long, buck and
buck-saw, four good raw hides, clothes
line, an arm chair with bar and pad
lock, half bunch of shingles selected for
use as spankers. q fifteen. cent looking
glass and other articles Of 70 particular
value to any one but the owner
THE RECEPTION ROOM.
This room is provided with arm. chairs
lemon-colored mating on the floor, q
basin in which to wash out tear stained
handkerchie!s, bundle of soft rags to
wipe the childrens noses on, and book
Of poetry containing such consoling
couplets as
"Oh! mother wipe away that tear
I'll spank it out OF him, meier fear"
Aud
''Oh! wives, bear up and come to me-
There's happiness in store for thee"
And
cold woman. wipe those weeping eyes
There's rest for YOU beyond the skies.''
THE FIRST CALLER
The hour of four o'clock in the after
noon had scarcely struck when the door
was opened and a little woman with a
sharp face and long, thin nose was ad-
mitted. She had been weeping. There
was culver 20 her chin rs she folded her
fan, and she sighed with terrible drear-
mess az she took chair and began:
''Mr. Joy, you see before you the wreck
of a once happy wife"
'Once happy wife, but now perfectly
reckless, even about new hats. I see,
madam-proceed," he replied.
my husband is out every night till
almost midnight" she continued. as the
tears came. Once he called me darling,
now he refers to me as Sarah Jane. Once
he patted my head and praised me. now
can't come near him but he wants to
know it have been eating onions again.
1t has been growing On him for whole
year, and to-day am the saddest wom-
an in Detroit. What shall do--what
Can I dot" ~ 10" *E
He solemnly picked up the dictionary,
looked under the head Of ~ for q few
minutes, and closing the book. leaned
back and said: s2ss. :ta, Is 40 @ssss !.
MADAM, I find nothing in More Web
ster's writings bearing on your case, but
I think ! see the remedy. When you go
home give the house good sweeping,
and don't leave any apple cores or base
ball clubs in the corners. Then put on a
tidy dress, pin clean collar around your
neck. shine up your earrings, tie, on
nice, white apron, and a. you~ hear the
old boy coming up the path tonight
strike up lively song and give him the
biggest smile You can and not increase