Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-05-26
Miscellaneous Items.

great ana influential Work IN creation.
"Why," said a lover to his mistress,
'are you like that hing,?" "Cant even
guess" because you are something to a
door," (adore).
Question for debating society.-"lf a
man has tiger by the tail, which would
be the best for his personal safely-to
hold on or to let go?
You call that trunk, do you?" growl-
ed a detected hotel porter. 1T only needs
a Lightning conductor to make it look
like boarding house."
Photographs and aerophones are all
right in their way, but this world is so
given to talking that speaking machines
are needed less than anything else.-N.
o. Picayune.
Death-bed repentance is like those sail
ors who throw their valuables overheard
in storm. They wouldn't do it if they
could help it, and are sorry that they
must.--N. Y. Herald.
Here are two pithy sayings from the
Orient: disgrace is an i'll omened bird
no cage can hold" And again: Mod
csty is sweet song bird no open cage
door can tempt to flight"
A Minnesota girl has been serving on
railroad as a breakman in male attire.
She gave a civil answer to the questions
of a passenger when her sex was at one
Suspected Cincinnati Breakfast Table,
my dear. you're as good, as gold, re-
marked Spilkins, as his little daug hter
rushed down stairs to greet him the other
afternoon. ''And what's more replied
the youthful Matilda, Tin rapidly com
ing down to pa
A marriage notice is not considered
complete without the name of the
officiating clergyman: and yet custom
sanctions the publication of death-no
tees without any mention being made Of
the doctors name.
A woman, returning from church ro-
Gently, declared that when she saw the
shaw!s on those Smiths, and then thought
of the things her own poor giils had to
wear, lift wasn't for the consolation of
religion, she didn't know what she should
do.''-N. Y. Graphic.
When a St. Louis girl is very much in
earnest about anything she says she will
"bct her boots on it. The auditors walk
round her feet, and when they have re.
turned and rested say that it she has not
wagered her all on the result, she has
betted great share of herself.
Octave Feuilet says: Providence has
so ordained it that only two women have
true interest in the happiness Of man
his own mother, and the mother of his
children. Besides those two legitimate
kinds of love, there is nothing between
the two creatures except vain excitement,
painful and idle deluson."
A brutal mother threw her five years
old boy from q bridge into the river at
Milwaukee the other day, and leaned on
the ratings to watch the death struggles,
exclaiming: eff your father won't sup
port you, drown!' The child's clothing
buoyed him up until the Mortified BY
ISLANDERS could rescue him.
Il should like to live to draw two
breatlis after I am acquitted, and then
I would die satisfed," said John Smart
of Burnet county, Texas, who had lain in
Jail nearly year on charge Of murder,
and was brought into court on his couch,
sick. At eleven o'clock the verdict mot
guilty." was brought in, and at twelve
the old man died.
Scene at an Irish bank: Lord Squan-
derer-"O verdrawn, Mr.. O'Hagau? Why,
cast up the passbook myself, and show
ed over thousand in my favor" Mr.,
OHagah-"Ah, me lord, it's trifing
mistake ye've made; we've cast the year
of our Lord into the poun's. Troth. it's !
rolling in riches we'd be if we could only
discount Annie Dominy."
Mr.. Labouchere declares that he re-
Gently went to church, and that being
there he was edited by an eccentric ex-
hibition OF pronunciation. The we'll
known text. He that hath ears to hear,
let him hear" was so etfectually dis
guised by ritualistic sspriest" as to |
sound something like, "He that hath
yaws to yaw, let him yaw"
Senator Lamar sent this sentiment to
Augusta, Ca: "The typical Irishman:
His home-Is the world. His friends all
the peoples. His faith--his own. No
cline to him So cold as will not produce
shamrock: no soil 80 barren as will not
grow shillalah. Foremost at fight
trolic, or funeral, his generous nature
finds blow Tor the bad, smile for the
glad, or tear for the sad.''
There was cry Of swatch! watch
murder" from the corner of Linn and |
Richmond streets on Thursday morning
at one o'clock. Three policemen and
physician ran at high speed to the scene
. of distress. and found a man standing in
the middle of the street. Upon being
asked what was the matter, he said that
man had been trying to rob him. "Well,"
said one of the policemen, "did he rob
you?" NO." said the man; ~ didn't have
anything"
One of the. teachers in the Twelfth
Ward Public School received, the other
day, an excuse written in behalf of a de-
linquent pupil by the father. 1t runs in
this wise: miss Teacher:-Dot poy of
mine vos absent de oder day ven he
stha'd out. He got one big colt in his
neck vot makes him much trouble all dc |
vile. Please don't give him some punish
ment ven he vas late in lie morning. He |
would got there shust in time every day. |
but he4s not himself to blame; he is cot |
no mother. She vos dead ten wears ago.
am this poy's parent by his mother BE-
fore she vos dead
Preserve the privacies of your house,
marriage state, heart from father, moth.
er, sister, brother, aunt, and all the world
You two, with Gods help, build your
own quiet world, every third or fourth
one you draw into it with you will form a
party and stand between you two. That
SHOULD never be. Promise this to each
other. Renew the vow at each temnta-