The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1878-03-28

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4 .&a f,stau .'it = aisi 1t
er that they never knew q better and
that the government expended an i'm
mense amount of time and labor il
making it as perfect as it knew how.
4 have now briefly explained te
you some of the salient points neces
sary for admission TO the department
and undoubtedly corrected some er
roneous views of your own
The reporter smilingly acknowledg.
ed that such was tho case, and asked:
why are not these things better
understood P
Because it is'not convenient to un.
derstand Them ss...4.-.
Have you any particular creed OF
sect among your guests p
No. replied his majesty, the gov.
ernment appears to
PAY BUT LITTLE ATTENTION TO CREED
1t takes the person himself, not his be.
longings.'
i suppose some are quite surprised
to fad themselves sent here 2
'Oh,immensely go. It's quite ridicu.
lous the way some go on. We had 9
law maker here the other day who
kept asserting that he had never done
anything wrong in his life. Come tc
look over his credentials, 1 found tha,
he was sent, not for doing wrong, bu,
for not doing right m
by the way, do you have any com
munication with the
SPIRIT WORLD?
Spiritualists, you know2'
His majesty broke out in hearty
cachinnations that caused the fat cam.
ell to look up to see if Long John OF
some other rich man was not bring.
ing out the cambria needle for his di-
version.
'Spiritualists? Well 1. should say
We had an odd batch of them in there
once, and they kept up such . racket,
wanting to 60 to see their friends and
wanting their friends to come and see
them, that they made the place un-
bearable, and we turned 'em OUT
The Lords knowsl The govern.
ment won't have them in either place,
80 suppose they are rambling around
loose
THE GATES AJAR.
Your reporter, led by curiosity,
asked if there were any newspaper
men in hell. His majesty shook his
head and smiled pensively. Being
pressed for reply he said:
NO. The place must have come re-
strictions, you know
Then will you have the kindness to
permit me to view the institution
sWhy, yes, certainly. But it must
be with the understanding that you
give truthful and ungarbled report
of what you see aud hear. We are sc
continually misrepresented that ]
think, perhaps, had best write out q
report myself snd. give it to you, so
that you will get 1t correct
oh, no, your majesty, we are order.
ed to make personal examination
very well. Follow me- Saying
which he arose, and allowing his tail
to remain at q slight curve, within
about an inch of the ground, led the
way to side door, and there called 8
menia1 of the department. In answer
to his voice, one of the stokers appear.
ed-a hideous looking Individual, made
of pure carbon apparently, yet imper
vious to fire. He was not very at
tractive guide, and your reporter nat
urally shrunk from him. His satanic
majesty noticed the aversion and said
DO not fear. Beelzebub is faithful
stoker and has been with me many
ages. He eau turn roast or keep up {
fire for . slow broil the best of any
hand I have ever had in the depart
ment.' ase
But there-ahem Lis there no su
perfcial warmth Will I, myself, b.
able to endure the heat?'
oh, yes. 1t is not kept hot enough
to melt brass
:Ahi'
No. The prevalent idea of hell ls al
wrong. People think 1t is one i'm.
mense pit that we just fill full of brim
stone and keep filing up clean to The
top. My dear sir, just contemplate fol
q moment such ridiculous idea! JUS
think of it'll Here, big, fat man get
ting the same amount of broil as q lit.
tie, thin one. Here, fair, tender maid
en- baking at the same heat as tough
benzine- soaked man from Cincinnati
Why, it is nonsense. But you shal
see and judge for yourself. Open th'
door, Beelzsbub.'
What was your reporters surpris'
on passing through hallway and
emerging upon the mosaic floors of
sumptuous pavilion, to be confronted
with ....
ONE OF THE LovLlEsT GARDENS THE
IMAGINATIoN CAN PICTURE.
Broad paths, paved with rare stones
were bordered by beds OF luxurian
tropical flowers that lad ened the al
with an odor like unto the rose gar
dens of the Orient, their gay color
flashing in prismatic rays thousant
reflections Of the light that filled tn,
air. Behind these flower beds, ani
scattered among them, were clumps o
Towering magnolia, tulip, orange, pom
egranate, and lemon trees, all weight
ed down with fragrant fruit and bios
SONS. A thousand fountains bubbled
gushed. and sparkled amid this pro
fusion of lOyeliness tha entranced tn
eve and enthralled the sense.