Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-12-09

Did you ever clasp a telegraph pole with
your left ear against it, brace yourself on
your left leg, and tap the pole with your
right heel?
A GLOBE reporter twisted himself into the
above position last night and gave the tap.
What a Kissing, roaring, commingline
of sounds rushed into that one ear
Sound after sound, great in
quantity and different in quality came leap
ing along, a hiss, whirr, tap and confu.
sion COMPOUNDED were whirled along. Out
of the mass of disturbance distinct sounds
began to assume shape, they took upor
themselves individuality, and then from Out
the midst of all, came voice.
The voice electrified the nearer; it had q
Kissing twang about it, mingled with muir
muring cadence. Some little time elapsed
before the voice could be understood but
finally it was detected that the following sal
utation was being extended the GLOBE man
"How're you 'sevening?''
"Well, thank you; but speak little more
distinctly
"It's habit 1 have Of swapping off my
words. Without being vain, can say that
every word 1 utter is worth it's weight in
gold -greenbacks being at par
thew are taken. Were [ to drawl
out my words or fill in the innumerabls
"ands,' ''its,'' and such two-penny words,
you newspaper men would have to ''prefer''
the telegraph company in speedy as
signment.'
Thanks were heartily given for the con-
sideration shown the newsf aper fl aternity.
ssConsider the newspapers, of course.
You are the best customers we
have in our line of business. You
draw on us from all parts
of the world. You are a greedy SET and
keep us running all over the world to get
what you want. We are pretty prompt, gen
orally, but sometimes we charge ourselves
with too much, and flicker in attempting to
carry too big load"
ssNo, the weather reports aren't the cause
of an occasional break, it is due to an i'm
proper management of the weather.
"Give myself away? We are forbidden to
do it. True, Congressional committees get
mess of them, but don't see how could
tell you all l know"
~ like your enterprise, so for this once, as
I will repeat every message as it passes
along"
HER ROYAL RICHNESS.
Zip, zip, zipperty-zip.
'Did you hear that?''
'sI should remark"
"Well, that is message from Ottawa de-
scribing Princess Louise's attendance at
church. Her dress is described, even to the
color of her hose. From foot to tip of
feather on her bonnet minute mention of
her apparel is given. Her royal highness
carried purple velvet prayer-book
Her royal highness knelt on enter
ing church. Her royal highness went
through the ritual in all its details, and re-
sponded in very distinct voice. Her royal
highness' husband accompanied her to
church. Hold up
TALMAGp.
Ding, dang, dong, dong.
"Now comes the usual Sunday slush, ser
mon by Talmage, What was his text?
didn't catch it, but he's been talking
about sthe pretty waiter girls Evidently
ha! He must be terribly observant cuss
made, he got the whole thing very pat. just
listen to him. They, the girls, live in con-
cert halls-we know better, Mr.. Reporter
they live up seven flights back. When a
man enters one of these 'dives'-he's even
got the slang he enters the portals of hell
and is allured along by beautiful
sirens. just listen to him, beautiful sirens
only they are old PETERS, every one of 'ern.
But here he goes again: Maddened with
liquor, crazed with the sensual surrounding
unspared by the temptresses, man becomes
victim, and is led into criminal excuses
you bet. Brethren, New York is cursed
with thousands of such dens of iniouity
thanks to our-used in an editorial sense
influence and the help of God Almighty
Brooklyn is spared from these temptations
of the devil. Noble youths are induced tc
take the first step -, but enough of this.
Here comes a weighty message"
"Whose? Wait moment. Let me see
Tilton, mouth, oh yes, Plymouth, expulsion
Elizabeth, quickened conscience. To be
sure it is from Henry Ward Beecher. The
same old story
"Have done with it? Yours truly
A CIPHER MESSAGE.
But here comes something in jerks. It's
terror. I'd hate to be the operator thai
had to jug that lightning
"What is it? Why bless your soul, it's 6
cipher Dispatch
s'Read it? Well, I wish could.''
"Signed? To the best of my belief, sc
cents worth. I read the signature to mean
c-o-m-p-r-o-m-i-s-e."
"Where was it sent from, do you say
North Platte, that's the way it looks to me
But can't make it out.''
Boom, boom, boom.
AFGHANISTAN.
soho, our peaceful Sabbath broken into
by war messages. What is it? Let me see
Daughter Of the moon, your transcendan
lustre has fallen upon the sight Of the ruler