The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1878-07-02
Hi. VI!
Come Heah, Chile, and Listen TO
Your Uncle
Who's Wandered TO- Desc Many
Days.

Days.
HOoray for the Fourth Of
Hold ON; hey pardon, reader.
ID It Amt Sunday, Satanis . hog.
Well, We knew il va. some kind of =
holiday. for everybody has got their good
clothes on, and We notice all those boys old
enough To wear . sssnding collar AMI bra~'
jewelry have got cigar in their mouths.
Being it Is Sunday, however, instead OF
the Fourth Of July, veil jus, hold her in.
But il il VA. the Fourth 81 July. we'd just
pull her wide open on the main track.
Man never il, but always 10 be best, that
il what . poet wrote when he was waiting
at . restaurant Tor the waiter who was IN
waiting 10 bring him his breakfast
LDok here, what becomes Of these WATERS
when they start of Ia get your grub, any how
We knew nice young fellow to 60 into a
restaurant Ia get his breakfast once, and .
right young waiter started of after il. The
minutes passed into hours, the hours turned
into whole day. The young man slept.
Still no waiter came. That day turned tn
days and weeks, months followed and years
followed the months. Al the ensi Of half n
true To his trust. sha: waiter re-
tnrne'i, With bald head aud long venerable
gray heard reaching to his knees. With
totterins steps he approached his guest and
gently a~Oke him. The guest, too, had
grown old, bald headed and gray-bear,le.!.
Out he struggled slowly To his feet, gaz,d
steadily At the aged servitor, a look Of joy
fui recognition brote over his counten.ncc,
and in a shrili. piping voice he exclaimed :.
AT l.si-ihank Goi, at last ls-hold
my breakfast"
Old psrd, hos did you stand the he,
weather last week. Sit in the cellar xiIh
4 chunk al ice ON your head!
iou ought Ia he glad that we've got hot
weather -see how il saves the wool.
Oh, wood-wood-wood were with thee /,
n" hanged il We do. either. But tell
you. parj, nothing Vas made IN vain, except
4 wooden shoestring.
No, nothing was made in vain At first
We thought the great big ball of mud that
hangs at the end of \ hogs tail MAS super
1uou-, and carried for ornament. BIT YES
er'lsy We saw h"g stop and b-gin In study
There was fias at work On his of hind
quarter. Then that hog threw his suul into
he root- al his tail. II volved like light
hing Ter n moment until that ball IL mu.i
.ame down LAX. steam triP-hsmmer .n
ha, h-a- Til. latter was stunned for AT
Instant, and in the next jumped clear over
;icher<' hotel and landed on the ,oof oi the
all. These are facts, your uncle tells yol.
IOnry.
We will nov call on our confrers in
xile, one oi whom comes up To the front
md sings:
II cat doth meet cat
CP"n a garden wsll.
And ii 4 cat doth greet cat,
q nee,l they hotS tn squall?
Every Tommy hrs his tabby,
Visiting on ihe wall,
And vet lac welcomes her approach
With hawk :
And il 4 kiiiek wish To court,
Cppn q garden wall.
WI, .iu''. ia. =. and n~~v,,S .".;i.
Aud not stand up and yauI;
Lift his precions back up high,
And show his teeth and moan,
As il 'twere cUlic more than love
That made that fellow groan.
Jee- whizz but that's natural; nov tina; j.
1t only poetry but truth. Seems Ia us We
In see those eats Just now. this blessed Sat
r'isy night, a. we write at the OPEN win.
'w. '>.e them," did We say, Yes, by
under, anil We hear 'em too.
"John, John, quick hand Us brick :"
Ga. well, iii.'s made III troubles aud cats
cares, wemean. ~ we'll rattle up the old
z and throw sgsin. Sixes, by gosh
ere il is:
A gushing love-letier picked up in the
'.et the other day contains the follow ing. )
"Mv Deer Henry embrace the present
porchooniiy Ia let you knouyh a. how |
I had spell NV the asu, an hope ti,esse ia
'e- will find va enj,yIn the same ble-sin, :
~ doant you on,y rite sweaie line ia =
yore -ufierin ksihrun all about her
rty-oh INV sweaie H-nri-mv turtle !.
my PigIng-my deer, deer, deer a
-nri -how NV pour sole Is longing for
re- swete voice-io KUN AMI lets gi, mar \
4. u
ir-. Henri, hurry up, or somebodyIl =
!e. sire.
Talking about love, and soft soap aud ssd =
IS remind Us of the story of the creation :.
orr first mother. That RIB has grown q =
81 w"n,irJns fair, hut we don't know :.
ether it was the fair thing by Adam. h
wever, many . man has awoke out Of q y, "
p TO find his wife gone. instead of like n
All, To wake up and find that he has AZ
ned one. =. -
While Adam slept, God from him took ;" ~
A bone; and, ~ an omen. "
te made II like \ seraph look, u
And thus created woman. ~
IT
ie took this bone not from his pate, r.
To show her power ample; :"
'or from his fe-t TO designate m
That he on her might trsmple. "t
IN
Int meath his arm. Ia clearly show
lie always should protect her;
md near his heart, tn let him know hu
How much he should respect her. ,.-
|e took this hone, crooked enough, ~. ~.
Most crooked of the human,
o show him hos much crooked stuff dot
He'd always find in woman. :"
vo'
rue ~ Gospel. mt
alking about crooked things, there vas
Low slid into the BAzOO Office the other iir'
and said he was an editor, local re- ing
er, and knew the whole business from No.,
,orner stone up. lie had been to col. M
and come frem college. and - he va. II:
rned long way from college, he'd work vel