The New York herald., 1878-10-20
CHAT BY THE WAY.

CHAT BY THE WAY.
There are three fatal diseases which aniiet poor hu
manity, VIE. atheism. osism and rheumatism and in
the minds OF most people the last is the wsrst.
No man can ever hope know much who dossn't
begin by knowing that he knows nothing
II is apt to be with your religion It with your
frisndsnip-ths more you profess the less you have
There are some people, says DR.. Jonnson, so quar-.
relsome that they had TWO ideas In their head shey
would fall out with each other.
1t Is not the man OF good intentions who gets 70
heaven but tho man whose good inten .ions are fol-
lowed by good desda
There are In the world great many periectionstA
They have q sois, pulpy kind Of religion which OK
cuses all their own shortcomings and finds ample
fault with those OF otherA
When man marr,ss for money is 10 net the honey.
moon that he LOOKS forward much the harvest
moon.
II was well deserved criticism, and one which
would not be wholly out OF place In some churches
nowadays friend was supplying tho pulpit Of Dr..
Chalmers Hundreds rose 10 60 out Tho clergyman
hcsitated moment before giving out the hymn, and
then said 1--WE will not begin public worship until
the cLan blows on"
Some people have such reverence Tor the truth
that they always keep respectful distance from It,
II may be, as has besn asserted. that life is only a
game OF toss up. bnt n must be confessed that o
general rule the heads win.
good re,ort is very like the shock Of bullet and s
sometimes pretty nearly as fatal lawyer once
rushed up TO Jerrold in the street and said, with
flushed face, '.Mr Jerrold, I've Just met scoun-
drslly barrister." Mr.. Jerrod looked at him with
bland smile and simply answered. '.What q csnci-
dence."
There s ono rule which, II properly enforced, ana
with great severity. Will insure domestic happiness.
Like all other great laws you will smile at It's very
simplicity when it Is announced It Is TO begin
life ty insisting that your wife shall have her
way and do just she pleases Love will be quick
ened In this way, and you will 60 round the house
singing tho old saw
For when l am paying your bills, on my life,
You seem to get dearer and dearer.
Il may be true that "tns world is full Of change"
but. somehow or other, we can't find any when wo
want II.
Even ministers will sometimes make ludicrous
mistakes, and they generally occur on the eravcst
occasIons At recent funeral the ofciating minister
said very solemn one "Fricnds, We viii sing the
hymn beginning Nearer my God, to Thee because
It was grea. tavoritc with the dear remana"
1t really gives very little satisfaction TO know
that the monopoly OF bank dealoaons 10 not confined
to America, ana yet the Glasgow experience will rob
the British mind OF one very important topic of CON-
versation, viz, the reckessness OF American moral
iy. For little while 1t least We shall miss that
superclous with which England speaks Of her
superior mercantile integrity, and that equally super
cilious gesture with which she draws up hcr white
robe as she passes us:-"The Americans. you know,
are she whole promising young people, but their
morals are so detestabIy bad that they positively
can't De trusted" TINS has been the popular verdict
After this will hardly DO necessary TOR The nation
to take In washing, since the laundry Is full OF Its
own soiled linen.
ht1n q ehap NJ
no. shot into the camp OF ths periccsionists "You
dinna tell US enough about unsng right
eousness" said critic OF this stump DR.. Risk.
The Doctor shrugged his shoulders and replied,
bIuntiy al never have noticed that - had any
nounce"
Lerd Beaconsneld's grim and mysterious smile
spreads all over the British Islands. He 10 supposed
to very profound because Is known that he
says what he means and under the pressing cir
cunstauces the smrk never leaves his face. He has
made England present OF Cyprus, which Smallsy
says ts q rag baby filled with sawdust, and he IL
ABOUT enter into the pleasing pastime Of = with
tho Amesr OF Aishanistnn. "Kesp the people
moving,n n his motto, land then they won's have
time think Of my mistakes" England has not had
real fight Tong time ,ha, she 10 beginning
think herself sweet 1--we. However, when the
spring opens, and the mud dries up she will probably
swallow another country under the prsext of protect
Ing tho Inhabitants Thereon.
Among tho novelties OF the coming winter We are
10 have Second Advent excitement II may be sue
cossfui directions. First, will attempt TO be
definite where the Bible Is vague, and prstoundly
learned in matters which the Lord distinctly said
man can mud out; and second, Il win try to drown
out tho practical common sense Of religion In great
tidal wave Of sentiment The basis OF tho oonven-
ton, revealed oy Ssn reporter 10 certainly very
remarkable, and, to say the least very funny pic.
ture presented. A. tho coming. IL IS said all Gods
people are to DO caught up in the clouds 'But,"
adds the speaker. with the most delicious n0srett
'this disappoaranoe OF Gods people will not snscs
society. except that there will be great many
missing. New York city will DO governed Dy the
men," Tho ofcials be LEFT. because they arc
bad lot "Busnsss will 90 on without nterrupton''-
this too s very suggestive fact-"and the churches
will 20 as they are, with good many people In
the pews. hope tEere won't be many preachers lsfs
In the pulpit" What delightful coalition Of affairs
this will bei Largo congregations, but no preachers;
all government ofcss niled usual and our business
10 be found as their warorooms just as though
nothing had happened. This Is a confession, indeed.
After all the work that has been done by tho Chris.
tian Church, when the great catastrophe and
svory true Christian has been caught up in the air,
the world 10 10 60 on Just the same ever, and
few will 60 10 glory that they won't be missed. If
this is really the case might DO we'll 10 postpone
this convention and 10 TO work TO convert goodiy
number OF officials and merchants so that when the
event happens there viii DO Christians enough 10
make / object OF all sentiments boss and quag-
mires this assurediy the the so.est
The finest tribute TO departed vito which We have
seen for many year was that engraved a tomb.
stone by a broKsn-hsartcd husband, who never
hope TO repair his loss I'VE were married twenty.
four years. and In all that time she banged
the dosr"
Paupersm sometimes recognizes the true pnilos.
opny Of lie. poor fellow caused these sgn,n-
cant lines TO be plsccd over hts grave:-
Here lie at the chancsl door;
Here lie. because 4 poor.
The further IN, the more you paw:
Here lio l, as warm as thoy.
A Atruth-teiling society has lately been Organised
The bylaws make IL obligatory Tor tho members 10