The Hillsdale standard. [volume] (Hillsdale, Mich.) 1851-1909, 1878-05-28
NUMBER 1888


He who leaves early gets the best hat.
Life is too short to spend in person
al quarrels.
II is better to speak kind words than
to slander.
Pride sleeps in a gilded crown-con-
tentment in cotton nightcap.
Jerusalem is lighted with American
kerosene.
The Cuban insurrection is not heard
from lately.
Wages Of operatives in England are
being reduced.
The less you tell the more you will
come to know.
A Turkish soldier receives less than
sl.50 a month.
Whatever you dislike in another.
take care to correct 10 yourself.
The tongue is little thing, but it
fills the universe with trouble.
Weeds should never have been allow
ed to bloom; nor fools to marry.
The lodge room is a good place for
intellectual culture and Improvements.
If husbands were always lovers.
wives would be the dearest ministering
angels.
The highest mark OF esteem woman
can give TO a man is to ask his friend
ship.
To borrow n pocket-knife and find il
will cut is one of the pleasantest sur
prises OF life.
Many people find their only hsppi-
ness in forcing themselves to be. unhap-
py.
Half the pleasures Of riches consist
in seeing others suffer the pangs of
poverty.
Two hundred horses per week are be-
ing purchased in and around Troy, by
agents of the English Government.
Kansas is to contribute statute Of
John Brown, to the Statuary Hall in
the National Capitol.
The Persians say of noisy, unreason-
able talk, 81 hear the sound Of the
milestone but see no meal"
The side dao~ - i,-- ---.-- 10 iino
great many peoples prayer books
open only on Sunday.
Doctors never allow ducks on their
premises-they make such personal re-
marks.
When a fond mother goes on q whal-
ing expedition, she never fails to get
all the blubber she wants.
He who eats mince pie in a restaur-
ant affords beautiful and touching evil
dence of childlike faith in his fellow
man.
Always do as the sun does-look at
the bright side of everything; il is just
as cheap, and three times as good for
digestion.
An Illinois minister gives the assur-
ing information that the Devil believes
in all the people who do not believe in
a Devil.
Mark Hopkins, treasurer of the
Southern Pacific railroad, lately de-
ceased, left Sl0,00O,000, His private
residence cost 81, 900, 900.
The yearly renewed of telegraph
poles requires an amount OF lumber
nearly equaling the annual product of
the State Of Maine.
She was plump and beautiful, and he
was wildly fond of her. She hated
him, but, woman like, she strove to
catch him. He was flea.
Kentucky raises more hemp, needs
more of it, and uses less Of it, accord
ing to population, than any other state
in the Union.
I love clnmor when there is an
abuse-The alarm bell disturbs the in
habitants, but saves them from being
burnt in their BEDS Barke..
What ever may be the Individual fate
OF women, nature claims aloud the one
great object of their creation. Watch
the little girls with their dolls.
A clock having struck the hour Of
one, tender hearted woman eyclaim-
ed: What q cruel clock. why SOP
asked friend. Because it struck its
little one.
A book agent, the other day, talked
half an hour TO induce lady TO buy a
book. Then she handed him n slip OF
paper on which was written: I'm defe
| and dunn
At duel the parties discharged their
pistols without eject, whereupon one
of the seconds interefered and propos-
ed that the combatants should shake
hands. To this the other second OBJ
iected as unnecessary. For said he,
their hands have been shaking this
half hour.