The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1878-05-25
All Sorts.


Be sure you're ahead-then go
right.
An honest man-but let US not
dig up the past.
AS fish balls go out of season GRO
quet balls come in.
"This," thought a boy while being
trounced by his papa, lis very like
"a whale"
The misery felt by the child who
couldn't go to the picnic, is nothing
to that OF the one who has been to
it.
1t may seem paradoxical, but the
best newspapers get the most cut
ting treatment from their brethren
of the tripod.
The difference between land
lord and tenant is that one tries to
raise the rent, and the other tries to
raise the wind.
An Iowa editor recently an
nounced that certain patron of his
was ..thieving as usual 1t was
written thriving.
What is the difference between q
tenant and the son of u widOwf The
tenant has to pay rents, and the son
of a widow has not two parents.
There is man only twenty-five
years of age who has already mar
ried fourteen women. He is cler-
gyman, and married them to their
husbands.
A Cleveland youth Of rather fast
'pr0clivities fell in love with a par
sons daughter, and as clincher to
his claims, said to the reverend gen
tleman, Ego my bottom dollar on
piousness."
An exchange says: Traces of the
late visit of the horse disease are
still apparent in this vicinity"
What has become of the balance OF
the harness aud the running gear
we are not told.
Observation teaches that there ia
no change in the style Of tish-bait
tins season. The best is procured
Mt the saloons as usual, and is car
ried in a glass recetacle, cut basket
shape, and gsrnished with q cork.
A man had to 60 to Wyandotte on
business which detained him all
night, his wife hardly slept wink
from fear that he would get hurt,
vet he hadn't been home over an
hour, when it took two policemen to
unclasp her tingersfrom his hair and
pry her teeth off his ear.
Adore God. Reverence and cheer
ish pour parents. Love your neigh
Dor as yourself, and your Maker
more than yourself. Be just. Be
true. Murmer not at the ways of
Providence So shall the life unto
which you have entered be the por-
tai to one of eternal and inetfhble
bliss.
When a Detroit boy il out until
half-past ten o'clock in the evening,
and the father says tn him: "Boy,
the first thing in the morning I'll
settle this with you" that boy arises
ut daylight, seeks the buck saw and
wood pile, and he never let's up for
"a moment until after his father has
eaten his breakfast and left the
house. ia
A Nevada audience dislikes to DO
disappointed Three thousand per-
sons gathered to see murderer
hanged at Carson, and their enioy.
ment WAS spoiled by u rcprievs
from the Governor. That night -
party of miners, who had walked
ten miles to witness the execution,
caught horse thief and hanged him
! to tree.
"Say, Jim, don't yon wish we had
ten cents to buy u present for our
poor lame sister 7" jim replied that
he did, and a gentleman pulled out
n shinplastcr and said he was glad to
be able to assist them in such q
praiseworthy enterprise. He met
the same boys half an hour after
ward, and each had his pockets stuff
ed with popcorn balls.
A gentleman who waited forty.
five minutes in Boston eating
house one day for Il steak, in paying
the bill remarked to the proprietor
| think | shall want another steak
one week from to day" albright,
said the proprietor, "you can order
it," "But prefer to leave the or
der now so that shall not have to
watt" said the customer, as he turn
I'd to 20.
Mr.. Magufiin braced himself "a,
against the boardipg-house table
and tried once more to cut the steak
The edge of the knife turned, bn
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