St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1878-03-08

in the hind legs, but no other motion.
Still he might be shamming. Bears of
ten sham. To make sure approached
and put a ball into his head. He didn't
mind it now; he minded nothing.
Death had come to him with a merciful
suddenness. He was calm in death.
In order that he might remain so, blew
his brains out, and then started for
home. l had killed bear!
How the hero satisfied family and
friends of the reality of his exploit, and
headed a crowd of armed people to
bring in the bear, and how he bore his
hOnOrs,-is it not all written in the YER
acious chronicles of the atlantic Mon thly.
'What Shall the Harvest Bel"
The funny man of the New York
Times relates the adventures of Mr..
and Mrs. Sawyer, Methodist minister
and his wife, and Master Sawyer, in
West BrOOktield, VT. "In northern
Vermont" he says, "that peculiar form
of social outrage known as surprise
party, but of late called a Bulgarian
atrocity, is still Iamentably frequent.
On cold evening in the first week of
the present month, Mr.. Sawyer and his
family were seated quietly by their So
cial hearth enjoying one anOther's So
ciety. The clergyman was reading
aloud the bishops pastoral letter; his
wife was busily calculating how to cut
up her husbands old overcOat, so as to
supply him with a new waistcoat, her.
self with new Overskirt, and Master
Sawyer with a new pair of trousers,
| hila thof nvanllnnt small hnN-
reading the improving adventures of an
eminent pirate, and wondering whether
he would ever be able to emulate them.
Not one of the family was prepared to
receive visitors. Mr.. Sawyer had on
his dressing gown and slippers Mrs.
Sawyer had let down her back hair to
give freedom to her mental processes,
and Master Sawyer had temporarily
slipped off his trousers to supply his
mother with pattern, while he wrap
ped the hearth rug about him. Sud
denly, and without the least warning,
more than four dozen people of all
kinds and sexes, including men, women
reformers and theological students,
burst into the room, carrying cake and
devastation with them. The marau-
ders conducted themselves after the
usual custom of their kind. They con-
versed with one another with great
hilarity, ignoring the sufferings of the
clergyman and his wife. They spread
their cake upon the table, and, devour-
ing it without plates, scattered the
crumbs over the new carpet. One young
man, having laid IA large piece of jelly
cake on the sofa, subsequently sat down
on it, and Mrs. Sawyer felt that she
would gladly join the Church of Rome
on condition that the medieval tOrtures
of the Inquisition should be revived and
she herself delegated to apply them to
that particular young man. After hav
ing reduced the furniture to that state e
of grease that it was no longer safe to
sit down, the miscreants gathered
around the piano and sung what Shall
the Harvest BeP until MI. Sawyer
mild as he was, regretted he could moi
take a sharp scythe and reap an imme-
diate and bloody harvest. While these
bloOd-curdling outrages were in pro-
gress in the parlOr, the good small boy
kept himself carefully out of the room.
He was not, however, wasting his time
in idle rags. He, too, heard the melo-
dious inquiries as to the harvest, and
remarked to himself that they would
find out all about the harvest if they
would only wait IL few minutes. Mean
while he was busily engaged in carry
ing pals of water and emptying them
on the front step and along the walk
leading from the front-doOr gate. The
night was cold and the water frOze rap
idly. Under his admirable manage
ment the ice acquired an unusually
smooth and slippery character, and
when the work was thoroughly done
the small boy retired to the second
story front window and awaited for the
surprise party to break up. The moon
was at its full, and shone brightly when
the first pair of miscreants-the young
man who sat on the jelly cake and a
heavy young lady to whom he was ell
gaged-issued from the front door and
sat down with tremendous emphasis.
Close behind them came the rest of the
raiders, who with one accord strewed
themselves over the ground, until in
some places they were collected three
or four deep. The shreks of the ladies
and the stronger remarks of the men
filled the air. No sooner would a strug-
Cling wretch regain his feet than he
would sit down again with renewed vi
Olence. The affrighted clergyman and
his wife gazed with wonder at the APP
palling spectacle, and the good small
boy never ceased to sing what shall
the harvest be p at the very top of his
lungs-interspersing that stirring hymn
with a wild 'whoop' whenever partic-
ularly brilliant pair of stockings waved
in the air. Although only three per-
sons sustained fatal injuries, there was
scarcely a member of the party whc
escaped without more or less serious
wounds, either of body or clothing
Seventeen legs, two ribs, six arms and
a nose were broken five ankles anG
six wrists were sprained, and one shoul.
der was dislOcated. The icy pavement
was strewed with fragments of teeth
spectacles, coats, trousers and skirts
and Master Sawyer picked up enough
copper and silver change the next morn
ing to enable him to buy twelve ticket,
in rattle for broken shotgun, ant
to subscribe handsomely to the mission
ary fund. 1t is generally believed tha
there will never be another surpris,
party in BIookfeld, and it is under con
temptation among middle-aged house
holders to present Master Sawyer will
a service of marbles, and life-mem
bership in the Foreign Missionary So
ciety, as testimony of their esteem
and gratitude"
Secretary Evarts' Farming.