The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-09-21

AllCl vi CdhltSG W IOuSc
myself, and go and visit some of the
poor people in the village, so l filled
my basket with some little delicacies
for the sick and set out.
Wherever | went it was the same
story all held forth on my husbands
goodness and kindness, for all had been
helped by him in some way or Other,
and all loved and respected him. AS |
listened with burning cheeks, l felt as
if | was the only person on earth who
had treated him with cruel ingratitude,
and | was the very person whom he
most loved and cherished.
At last | went home, tired and sick
at heart; but there was no one to notice
| was pale and worn out, no one to get
me wine or soup to revive me, no one
to make me lie down and rest, as he
would have done had he been there.
o, how missed him! What fool
had been! Was there ever woman
loved and cared for as | had beenp
Was their ever friend so ungrateful?
o! why had ever let him leave me?
was sure he would never come back
Why had he gone away?
And conscience answered.: You
drove him; he gave you all he had to
give, and in return you gave him moth
ing but cold looks and unkind words;
and so he left you, to seek love and
sympathy from his MOTHER
This thought almost maddened me;
in fancy l saw her sitting in my place
by his side, loving and caressing him,
as had the best right to love and ca
ress him; pictured her receiving ten
derby the little loving acts | had re-
ceived so coldly, and now l was seized
with jealous anger against her. |
mentally accused her of estranging my
/ husband from me, and of trying to win
his love from me, as though his heart
was not large enough for both of us.
When Maud arrived in the afternoon,
l treated her to a long TRADE of abuse
against mothers-in-law in general, and
my own in particular, and | vented all
the anger l really felt against myself,
on the innocent Mrs. Cartwright.
"Why, Nelly" said Maud, 81
thought you liked Mrs. Cartwright so
much, and thought her so nice, that
| you even wanted her to live with you,
only your husband very properly, as
| mamma says, OBJECTED.
$50 | did," | answered; &c but did
not know then she would ever entice
my husband away from me in this way.
or of course, should never have liked
her."
" Really, Nell, you are very hard on
the poor woman; for, as | understand,
Mr.. Cartwright went to her of his own
free WILL because she was not well, and
he thought his company would do her
good" said Maud.
Nonsense; | am sure he would
never have left me alone, unless she
had put him up to it, l replied rather
GROSSLY.
1.-The truth is. Nelly, you are so
much in love with your husband that
you are jealous even of his mother; and
you are making yourself miserable
about nothing. Why, Mr.. Cartwright
will be back in a fortnight, and | dare
say you will get letter from him every
day; so cheer up, and let us go for a
drive" said Maud.
agreed to this plan, and giving
Maud the reins, | lay back and thought
of her words. Was she right after all?
Was jealous? Was / really, as Maud
said, in love with my husbandp Had
l only found it out now [ was deprived
of his company? Was this the reason
that l could do nothing but inwardly
reproach myself for my conduct to him?
And the longer l thought, the more
convinced | became that Maud was
right, that l was jealous, and that was
in love, as she called it.
This knowledge did not make me
happier, for | no sooner knew / loved
him than l longed to tell him so, and
make up, as far as | could, for all
my former cruelty; for I could call my
conduct by no milder word. passed
sleepless night, and as l lay awake |
composed various letters of confession,
which | resolved to send the following
day; but when morning came my pride
stepped in, and | began to feel itwould
be impossible to write, and | settled |
must wait till my husband came home,
and then tell him how his absence had
altered me.
l got up early and walked out to meet
the postman, so anxious was to get
letter from him; it was the first | had
ever received from him since our mar
riage, and no girl was ever so anxious
for, or so pleased with, her first love-
letter, as | was over this.
1t was long letter, full of loving
messages and terms of endearment,
some of which cut me to the heart, for
they sounded like so many reproaches;
in reality l think there was tone of
gentle reproach throughout the letter.
He gave me an account of his journey,
and of his mothers health, begged me TO
write to him few lines every day, but
he said not a word about returning.
l spent the morning in answering it,
much to Maud's amusement, who, of
course, thought | was pouring out vol
umes of love and complaints of my tenn
porary widowhood; after tearing up
about a dozen sheets of paper at last
sent q short note, cool and with no al
lusions to my misery. The more tried
the more impossible l found it to a0rite
any expression of love or penitence;
though was hungering to do so.
For whole week L went on in this
way, suffering more acutely every day,
and every day receiving long, loving
letters from Mr.. Cartwright, and writ
ing short, cold answers.
lost my appetite, | could not sleep