The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1878-12-19

A MAN may smile and smile and not
be elected.
Sailed rats are actually exported
from India to China as an article OF food.
FORT RICHARDSON, in Texas, which
cost the government about $500, 900, was
abandoned last spring and is now going
to ruin.
THREE stones, placed over the grave
of Thomas jefferson, at Monticello, Va,
have been taken away piecemeal by relic
hunters.
"MY way of life is fallen in the scar,
the yellow leaf," a. the cabbage remarked
after it had been transmitted into choice
Havana.
A ROCHESTER Justice closes the mar
Iiage ceremony with this injunction;
"What love hath joined together let not
dscOrd put asunder,"
The strongest propensity in awoman's
nature" says careful student of the
sex, 'is to want to know what is going
on, and the next thing is to boss the job"
WILLIAM AUGUSTUS to sleepy room
mate Come, John Henry, why don't
YOU get up with the lark, as do?' John
Henry, grimly: Been up with him all
night"
The Danbury News suggests that
when sCythe is not in use, it should be
buried in deep trench in some piece OF
woods, and guard OF armed men should
Ia, liant arnuuI tha wnDlI
A MICHIGAN farmer writes to the fac.
ulty of Yale "What are your terms tor
year ? And does it cost anything extra
il my son wants TO learn to read and
write as well as row boat ?"
"KEEp way from dat negar, tell
you" said Uncle Rube to his sable
daughter; keep way from him. He's
like what de 'postle John lived on in the
wild ness" CLOVIS dat" she asked,
Glow cuss an wild, honey" replied
Uncle Rube.
ARTHUR (who has been listening with
breathless interest to one of grandpapas
Bible storiesJ: "And were you in the ark
grandpapa, along side of Noah and all the
rest OF 'em p Grandpapa Indignantly:
ono, sir, certainly not" Arthur: Then
how is it you wasn't drowned?'
As the happy couple were leaving the
church the husband said to the partner
of his welded lie Marriage must seem
a dreadful thing to you why, you were
all of tremble, and one could hardly
hear you say, Il will" ~ will have
more courage and say it louder next
time" said the blushing bride
A ITrI Portland girl recently testi-
fed innocently to the life Of drudgery
experienced by the average "Queen of
the household" who does her own
housework Somebody asked the child
if her mothers hair was gray. 81 don't
know" she said she il to tall for me to
see the top of her head, and she never
sits down."
A GIRL in Hartford was sent to store
the other day to buy some lace. The
clerk, after putting up the package,
said "Well, there are two Fad halt
yards at ten cents a yard low much
does it come to To which the Miss
replied "Well, | am not going to tell
/ have to study arithmetic all the rest OF
the week, and | am not going to bother
my head with it Saturdays"
AN Oil City citizen has completed
and forwarded to the Post office Depart
ment at Washington model of 'posta!-
clerk~proof envelope" The new envel.
ope is intended for the transmission OF
money through the mails. 1t is made of
chilled steel, and the inventor claims that
the tools now employed by bank robbers
and "a e.blowers will have no effect upon
it. The envelope l. sailed with COM
bination lock, much after the pattern of
those used TN the vaults in the Bank of
England, but il much more complex.
: oil City Derrick.
Lo. the poor Indian When he goes
home to his cherries wgwam in the
evening he has no dine novel with
VIII CHI to while away the weary hours;
no friend next door TO come in and talk
politics; no medical almausc' to ad no
'ew York papers, With full oceedings
of the racy Vanderbilt will case; no
money in a safe, for masked robbers to
break in and steal no civilized pleasures
OF this kind He simply hangs up the
b!oodys alps he has captured during the
dav, beats his sluiw with a club wraps
A buffalo robe around him, Al d lays down
to pleasant dreams. If II pale>'Sce comes
within half Il nile of his wi IVAN, the
slumbering red man snuffs him a'ar,
awakes, and goe out and shoots him full
of arrOws.- Noristown Herald.
WHAT food do cats prefer ?" "a 500
moe King bird il their first choice. II the
family are not sbl to keep Il hooking
bird, the cat must put up with an oriole
or a German canary. Ii is only when
suffering for food that cat will accepta
surIoin ,tpsk " "Csis can't sing. can
they ?" NO; but ble.s 'em they can
keep trying to learn how They have got
~ they can sourd the fra four notes on
the scale, aud they are determined to get
the res" "What time do they sing the
sweetest ?" AT night, between he
hours of | | p. nj. and IA m. You have
prjbtbly read items about bold, bad men
Ringing boot jacks, sticks OF wood and
other chamber furuiturl at singing cats
Dln't ever associate with such people.
Cats have a. much right in America as
any one else, and il is only the meantst
kind of felix's who will try TO keep em
lroan rising M in the world" "how
long do cats live - Nobody Knows So
ma cat ever had fair show 10 see Nv
many years he could Pu: 10; Ahtr ne
has lung around one neighborhcod ior
fifteen or twenty years ONE one murders
him 10 cold blood"