Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1878-01-18
So in Advance.

JusIlce Is sure then TO be tempered
with mercy, as in the case of the
snateher of spoons brought before
a Georgia court many years ago.
Bella Brown, who then went the cir
cult as judge, was an able man, in
equal repute as lawyer and as a
boon companion. The niobt befora
the court was open at 3ayton his
Honor went to a tavern kept bv
Sterrit and had such good time Of
it with his legal friends that bv mid
night he was not quite so sober as a
judge should be. Somebody
cleared the table of all it's spoons.
and put them in the unconscious gen
tleman's pocket. He was greatly
perturbed at finding them there next
morning. They were Sterrit' spoons
without doubt, for they bore the
landlords initials.
Polly, said the judge TO his wife,
was tipsy when | came home?
Yes, she said. You know vour
habits when you get among those
lawyers.
Much relieved in his mind, the
Judge declared be could understand
how the spoons came into his pos
session. That fellow keeps the
meanest liquor in the State; but l
never supposed it would make a
man steal.
A day or two aftsrward a man
was arraigned for larceny; he plead
ed guilty but urged he was intoxi-
Gated when he committed the Of
tense.
What's the nature of the charge?
inquired Judge Brown.
Stealing money from the till at
Sterrit's tavern, replied the clerk.
Young man, said the judge, SOL
emnly, are you sure you were tipsy
when you took this money?
Yes, your honor; when l went
out doors the ground kept coming
u pand hitting me on the head
That will do. Did you get all your
liqnor at Sterrlt's?
Every drop, sir.
Turning to the prosecuting attor-
ney, the judge said: you will do me
the favor by entering a noHe prose
q1t; that liquor of Sterrit's, | have
reason to know, is enough to make a
man do anything dirty. l got tipsy
on it myself the other night, and
stole all his spoons. If Sterrit will
sell such abominable stuff he oughn't
to have the protection of the Court.
Mr.. Sheriff, you may release the
prisoner.
The Hon. Kiah Rodgers, common
ly called Old Kye, presiding in q
Louisiana court, thus spoke bis
mind, when summing up an action
brought by an Overseer for wrongful
dismissal from his situation.
The jury, said his honor, will take
notice that this court is well ae-
quainted with the nature of the
case. When this court first started
in the world it followed the bust
ness of overseeing, and if there is
any business which this court under
stands, it's hosses, mules and mig
gers; though this court never over
seed in its life for less than $500.
And this court in hoss racing was al
ways naturally gifted; and this
court in running a race whar the
hOsses was turned, could alters turn
a hOss so as to gain fifteen feet in a
race; and on a certain occasion it
was one of the conditions of the
race that Kye Rodgers shouldn't
turn nary of the hosses. Surely it
must have been Old Kye who, upon
taking his official seat for the first
time, said; If this court know her
duty, and she thinks she do. just
ice will walk over this rack with
her head and tail up.
Prone as he might be to diseurs-
iveness, we fancy the Louisiana
Judge would have laid down the
law a little more lucidly than the
California sheriff did after having
been interviewed by a self-eon-
feSsed murderer, who desired to be
sent to New York to answer for the
crime he had committed IN that
city.
So your conscience amt easy, and
you want to be hanged? said the
sheriff. Well, my friend, the eoun-
ty treasury amt well fixed at pres
ent, and l don't want to take any
risks, in case you're not the man, and
are Just fishing for free ride. Be
sides, those New York courts can't
be trusted to hang a man. As you
say, you deserve to be killed, and
your conscience wont be easy till
your are killed, and as it can't make
any difference to you or society how
YOU are killed, l guess I'll do the job
myself! and his hand moved to his
pocket, but before he could pull out
the revolver and level it at the muir
derer, that censeience-Stricken indi-
vidual was down the road and out
of killing distance.
When lawyers behave in such a
free and easy way, it is not surpris-
ing that a prisoner presumeS to enter
into a familiar conversation with the
bench. An old tippler, when asked
by Judge McGrew, of Colorado,
whether he was rightly or wrongly
with being intoxicated,
pleaded, Not guilty, Your Honor.
Suustroke? queried the Judge.
Yes, sir; the regular New York
variety.
You've had sunstroks a good deal
in your time, | believe?
Yes, Your Honor; but this last at
tack was most severe.
Does sunstrOke make you rush
through the streets Offering to fight
the town?
That's the effect precisely.
And makes you throw brlckbats
at people?
That's it Judge. | see you under
stand the symptoms; and agree with
the best recognized authorities, who
hold it infames the organs of com.
batitiveness. When man Of any
temperament gets a good square sun.
stroke he's liable TO do most any
. hsnc.