The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-02-28
Before and After Marriage.

WHLN q young man begins to feel
especially drawn toward a maiden
and by more intimate acquaintance this
interest ripens into affection-all the
pOliteness and respect he can command
will be manifested when in her pres
ence. The best traits of his character
are called out to entertain and honor
her; to draw closer the bond of union
he desires to see established. Both, if
the interest is mutual-perhaps with
no intention or desire to make false
impressiOn-are in that exalted state
of mind which shows them to the
greatest advantage. Particularly is this
true as regards the lover. To crafty
the slightest wish of his chosen no ef-
fort is felt to be wearisome-no labor a
burden. All self-denial for his lady
love is accounted as Joy and honor.
His very life seems too small an offer
ing.
But how is it when the prize is Sc
cured, and the twain are made one?
Are those graceful courtesics, sweet
amenities, kind and watchful attcn-
tons, through which the coveted prize
was led to an exalted estimate of the
lovers character, to be continued by
the husband, growing brighter and
respectful attention and honor which a
true gentleman yields to soonsan be
more scrupulously accorded, be held
more sacred, when bestowed on the
wife? "Then will sweet peace wreathe
her chain round them forever" and
the love which budded in youth, and
grew deeper and broader with the after
years, will be matured and perfected in
old age, holding them as one till sepa-
rated by death, they meet again in that
better world whereof Love is the light.
But if marriage brings Indifference.
or feeling of ownership which is sup
posed to exOnerate husband from all
attention to his wife-to release him
from the commonest civilities
he dare not refuse to other women,
! then there is little hope of true happi.
ness in that household. The first year
of married life is doubtless in some
respects the most critical. No young
people ever become fully acquainted
with each other during the period of
courtship, or engagement. There is
glamour over them that hides any dis
agreeable or inharmonious popularity,
and every one has some, that will not
show well in a strong light. We daily
see young people accept the mutual
duties of the married state profoundly
ignorant of the life upon which they
SO thoughtlessly entered. The hus-
band may understand what is right or
honorable among men, but without the
first idea, especially if he has not been
brought up with sisters, of what respect
and attention a wife has a right to ex-
pect, and he is bound to give as an hon
Orable gentleman.
We claim for wives a degree of re-
spect and attention beyond what true
gentleman gives any other lady; but we
also claim that wives shall be governed
by the same rule. Both should be affa-
BILE, courteous and kind to all with
whom they associate, but for each other
there should be deeper respect and
Difference than is ever seen in their in
tercourse with others, however worthy;
yet in far too many cases politeness
and good breeding are folded away
with the wedding finery. But till the
children that are growing up around
us are taught the sacredness of the
obligations those assume whose hands
are Joined in wedlock, the horribly dis
gushing records of cruelty and crime
that fill our daily papers will continue,
aud happy homes be like angels Wis.,
its, few and far between"