The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-12-18

vi Lne renowned sOclaI IeaQeri
who were conspicuous two years ago
Mrs. Fish, Mrs. Robson, Mrs. Belk
nap and Mrs. Williams, not one re
mains. Tue cabinet ladies have
no knack at leadership. 1t is better
so; vanity fair is sufficiently vain
without quasi official encouragement
Il
The LudicrOuS Sides of Life.
The dexterous leap of thought, by
which the mind escapes from a seem
ingly hopeless dilemma, is worth all
the vestments of dignity which the
world holds. It was this readiness
in repartee which continually saved
Voitaire from social overturn. He
once praised another writer very
heartily to a third person. ''It is
very strange" was the reply, 'that
you speak so we'll of him, for he says
that you are a charlatan." ''Oh,"
replied Voltair, "I think it very like
ly that both of US may be mistaken"
Again, you must have heard the
anecdote of the young gentleman
who was discoursing very dogmatic-
ally about the appropriate sphere of
woman. "And pray. SIR" screamed
out an old lady, what is the appro-
pirate sphere of womanF ga celes.
tial sphere, madam"
Robert Hall did not lose his pow
er of retort even in madness. A
hypocritical condoler with his mis-
fortunes once visited him in the
mad-house, and said, in a whining
tone. What brought you here, Mr..
Hall ?" Hall significantly touched
his brow with his finger, and replied,
"What'l never bring you, sir-too
much brain !''
A rapid change from enthusiasm
to nonchalance is often necessary in
society. Thus, a person once elo.
quently eulogizing the angelic quail
ties of Joan of Arc, was suddenly
met by the petulent question, "What
was Joan of Arc made of p "She
was Maid of Orleans"
A Yankee is never upset by the
astonishing. He walks among the |
Alps with his hands in his pockets. |
and the smoke of his cigar is seen
among the mists OF Niagara. One
of this class sauntered into the Office |
of the lightning telegraph, and |
asked how long it would take to
transmit a message to Washington.
Ten minutes" was the reply. 81
can't watt" was his rejoinder.
Sheridan was never without rea.
son-never failed to extricate him
self in any emergency by his wit.
At a country house, where he was
once on visit, an elderly maiden |
lady desired to be his companion in
a walk. He excused himself at first |
on the ground of the badness of the |
weather. She soon afterWard, how.
ever, interrupted him in an attempt
to escape without her. "Well," she
said, sit is cleared up, see." "Why,
yes" he answered, sit has cleared
up enough for one, out not enough
for taVO."
1t was this readiness which made
John Randolph so terrible in retort.
He was the Thersites of Congress, a
tongue-stabber. No hyperbole Of
contempt or scorn could be launched
against him, but he could overtop it
with something more scornful and
contemptuous. Opposition only mad
dened him into more brilliant bitter.
ness. Isn't it a shame, Mr.. Presi-
dent" said he one day in the Sen
ate, 'that the noble bulldogs of the
Administration should be wasting
their precious time in worrying the
rats of the opposition?'' Immediate.
ly the Senate was in an uproar, and
he was clamorously called to order.
The presiding officer. however, sus-
tanned him; and pointing his long,
skinny fingers at his opponents,
Randolph scr canned out, RATS, did
I say ?-mice, HaiceF'