The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-12-12

yard, and the hogs ate off the calves Of his
legs.
"Brace up" is crisp and vulgar. You
must say, Exert yourself to assume
perpendicular.
The purchasing power of money is said
to be about three times what it was in the
imitation times.
Who is the LATEST man? The furniture
dealer. He keeps chairs and lounges
about all the time
Two things 90 off in a hurry-an arrow
dismissed from bow, and a beau dis
missed by belle.
There is no animal that will better re-
pay the cost of good extra keep than
dairy COW in full milk.
All who are fortunate enough to have
the telephone in their buildings have a
snap on the lightning.
81 find your recommendations very good,
Bridget" Eyes, ma am, and now Ill see
yours, ma am, if you plaze."
Prof. Tyndall in alecture said: "a cob
web spread over a blossom is sufficient to
protect it from night chills."
A boy died in London, from the effects
of blow on the head with book III
flicted by his teacher in school.
In the whole United States, only 7G7
out of 2OS,4SG stockholders in National
Banks own over 500 shares each.
Upon ten acres in California farmer
cut an average of ten tons to the acre of
alfalfa, for which he received $500.
When Adam was half through naming
his descendant, he got tired, and said,
Lets quit and call the rest Smith"
1t was a bright little boy who told his
teacher that there were three sects-the
male sex, the female sex and the insects.
The whole number of interpretations
filed in San Francisco last year was 400,
Of which 265 were by mining companies
To the American boy there is an awful,
| majestic difference in weight between
the butt end of a fish pole and hoe-han-
| die
The youngster who was sent away from
| the table just as the pastry came on, went
sadly up stairs singing, Good by, sweet
tart, good BY"
It is estimated that the length of the
entire root-system Of vigorous barley
plant is 139 feet while that of the oat
plant is 1876 feet.
The following sign is said to be attach
ed to the Lyceum hall, on Lvnde street.
Boston: "W. Browning, clothes cleaned
and repaired in the rear
In 100 parts of fine -four, as obtained
from white, soft wheat, are - parts water
1913 tibrine, 74.3 starch, O.S fat, OF calIU-
lose, OF parts mineral matter.
1t doesn't require a very imaginative
man to have unutterable thoughts when
he's whacked across the southern end of
his back with a muddy crosswalk.
| There is beautiful precept which he
who has received an injury, or who thinks
that he has, would for his own sake do
well to follow: Excuse half and forgive
| the rest.
| Nothing tries the patience of man
more than to be sitting on a sofa in a dark
room with pretty girl, and be compelled
TO listen to her brother giving the history
OF base ball club.
The Pope's Swiss Guards. about whom
SO much has been heard of late, all come
| from German Switzerland, and are chosen
/ by the parish priests for their good char
acter and devotion to the church.
Kansas leads every State in the Union
| in the yield of corn per acre, being forty
! three and one-half bushels. Little noun
famous New Hampshire comes next,
strange to say, with forty-two bushels.
1t is never too late for mule to serve
his country. An animal of the kinu,
thirty-eight years old, kicked a thief to
death in Georgia, and $50 has already
been subscribed as sinking fund to buy
| oats
Professor Stern has discovered in the
archives of Oidenburg a relation by My
! Illus of his visit to England containing an
account of his conversation with Milton,
as well as some unpublished letters OF
| Milton himself.
There are over S2,500,000,000 in rail
| road bonds and stocks which pay the
| owners nothing. There is S500,000,00
I in iron furnaces and manufacturing estab-
/ lishments, and 5000, 100000 in shipping,
! hopelessly tied up.
An electrical invention, exhibited at the
| Paris Exhibition, for calling servants, IL
| said to be very ingenious We think if
machine could be constructed that would
make servants get up when called, it
would undoubtedly aasicer.
By taking the weight of nutritive mat
ter that is produced from a given space of
land, the proportions are as follows: Po-
tatoes, 90; cabbages, AZ; magel wurzels,
%; carrots, "a; kohlrabi, q; Swede tur-
NIP. 10; common tuInip, Is.
A Chelsea lawyer was intrusted with a
bill of $14 to collect. He brought civil
suit, and after he had got through, his
confding client received the $14, and also
bill from the lawyer for S44, which the
confding client had = pay.
4 st. Louis boy wrote the following
composition: ''Girls are the only folks
that has their own way every time, and
don't you forget it. This is all know
about girls and father says the less | know
about them the better off ann
Counsel had been questioning certain
witness named Gum, and in closing he
said to him: Mr.. Gum. you can now go
of" The Judge on the bench gravely
added: "Sir, you are discharged" OF
course an explosion in court Immediately
ensued.
The trade in American beef and NUT
ton has rapidly grown in England. A
few years ago it was sold at heavy dis
count under English stock. Now it is
eagerly sought. Our trade in beef and
mutton this year will amount to over
SS.000,0C0.
New Bedford, Mass, enjoys the pres
ence of Benz. f. King, Jr, who recently
coughed up splinter of wood which had
been in his body for twenty-nine years,
being part of stick which accidentally
broke of. He had often experienced
sharp, neuralgia pains in the vicinity of
the wound, which have now entirely
ceased