The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1878-07-20
PASSING SMILES.

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THE bestmeans to learn our faults is to
tell Others of theirs; they will be too
proud TO be alone in their defects, and
will seek them in us and reveal them to
us.
A MAN who is not able to make bow
to his own conscience in the morning, is
hardly in a condition to respectfully
salute the rest of the world during the
day.
Folks who can't understand why
robins are sent to eat up all the cherries,
should remember that in all probability
the robins can't understand why human
beings are sent to do the same thing.
A NEW YORK fashion writer says any
one wearing travelling dress with
trained skirt this season will be looked
at" Well, bless your innocent old
heart that's just what they want and
expect.--Breoktast Table
"WHY are the men of genius SO often
bacbelors?' asked Miss Kate Sanborn.
AS genius is merely another name for
excellent common-sense, any answer is
apt to make the married man look bad
| by contrast
EVERYBODY has heard of G1auber's
salts. but how MANY know whether
| Glauber is the name of a man or place.
He was in fact famous chemist If
Amsterdam in the sixteenth century,
who invented the preparation bearingl. "
name.
"Can the ghost of chance be
properly called a spiritual opportunity
asks correspondent. A spiritual
opportunity might occur when the bar
keeper goes down cellar for some more
ice, and leaves decanter on the
counter.
A MORMON Elder ran away from q
New Haven Hotel the other day, leav-
ing behind him traveling-bag, VIII CHI
the landlord seized. 1t contained
broken shaving-mug, apair ofgum shoes,
two chest protectors, and treatise on
salvation.
CHERRY rum refuse thrown in the
yard of u Bangor woman was eaten by
turkeys that apparently died from the
effects. After being plucked they were
thrown into heap on the grass. On
the next morning they were found walk
ing around the yard in undress.
A GREAT man lives in the influence
of his example and lis teachings. How
many there are who resurrect Franklin
in his famous maxim, "Save pei ce,
pounds will save themselves" when the
church collector shakes the contribution
box or basket under their nose!
A PAIR of very chubby legs,
Encascd In scarlet hose;
pair of little stubby boots,
With rather doubtful toss
little kilt, a little coat,
Cut as mother can
And lol before us strides In state
The futures coming man."
You can't have everything you want
in this world. Life is like blanket
that is too short; if you pull it up over
your shoulders, you uncover your feet;
and IL you cover your eetyour shoulders
must be bare. However, some cheerful
people manage to draw their feet up
little and so pass pleasant night.
CONE is glass in Eyes and the other is
isinglass.' That is the answer--and a
clever one it is, too. What we want
now is conundrum to fit it.-Norris-
torn Herald. What's the difference
between half-pint flask in the heart Of
an iceberg, and lump of ice in
goblet Bredk3ast Table.
ARAGo once confidently announced
bLdU IL Dik COinCb Vnau Vao app SoSA4Ao6
the earth would not destroy it. Glow
do YOU known he was asked. ~
DON'T he replied; "but in either case
| am safe. If it does not knock the
world to pieces, shall be considered q
prophet; if it does, they can't blow me
up in the newspapers"
HERE are few Of the ways that let
tiers come directed to the Conshohocken
postoffice: Chochen, Conshoracken,
Chuncheyhocken, Conhochum, Con-
fecohcsink, Houskokcken, Caunuchau-
ken, Cconshocohicken, Kunchyhoyken,
Conchenhagen, Conchahcaken, Kon-
chohogen, Conjunction, Conciahockin,
Conshawhawean, Cashahkms.
RECOGNIZED rank - clearinghouse
butter. Cents of duty--Those paid at
the Custom House. Men of letters
Corresponding secretaries and sign
painters. Absence of mind--Notabl
obvious in the proceedings of the last
Congress- Likes to see the rule laid
down-The schoolboy, if the rule is an
oak one which has been on visiting ac-
quaintance with the sensitive portion of
his person.
WHEN Sir John Carr was in Glasgow,
about the year 1857, he was asked by the
magistrates to give his advice concern
ing the inscription to be placed on the
Nelson monument, then just completed.
Sir John recommended his brief record:
=" Glasgow to Nelson" Juist &c." said
one of the baillies; and as the town O.
Nelson's close at hand, might We no
just say, Glasgow to Nelson, sax
miles, an SO it might serve for monu-
ment an milestone too"