The Van Buren press., 1878-10-22

AGRICULTURE LORE.
What DOuan Knows About
Farming.
From Bentonville Advances. October 10.
That invitation TO deliver the address
at the Carroll County Fair. has stirred
our truly rural ambition to the very bot.
tom. We long to sir our rural knowledge,
to parade our horticultural attainmsnts.
to dispense ow horticultural erudition,
to display our Horticultural taste. aud
manifest our every other icultural pro
fundity, at every opportunity. There is
new charm for US in orchard, field and
meadow, Oh, the life Of . farmer, =
farmer for US! II need ke, We would
gladly be . scarecrow, hung up in .
pumpkin patch, TO fright the buxzards
frou the early fleming worm. But even
in The glorious profession Of .As lamsn-
ted Col. Adam, the horny handed Gran,
moved, some faults to be remedied; aud
that is the high and holy aim Of this or
ticle. 1t 10 written for the benefit aud
sdi6catiou Of such farmers in Arkansas,
and the south generally, - cannot live
and pay their taxes aud whiskey bills, by
cultivatiug the richest soil beneath the
sun. II our suggestions are deemed OF
value to them, they may say SO In Ger
man text or Choctaw letters land badly
spelt) on the brass door plates on their
cofiln- lids. 1t will amuse Us, In the res.
direction, whom We are whole covey OF
angels, to fly around among their graves.
with turkey wing fans in our hands, aud
read their grateful ackno wledgements Of
the good We did them.
HoGs.--No illustrious statesmen, kins.
men and friends Of our late nsbls prssi
dent, and his Naturalization, wswers not
speaking to you when We used that word.
Tue beat breed OF these classic animals
10 tho alligator hog, with snou, ton feet
long, modelled on . locomotive COW
catcher. Fifteen Of these picturesque
beasts will devour all the corn you can
raise on hundred acres of jimson-w weed
land and when properly tattsned at q
cost Of $500 more, they can be sold al
most any where for saddle sests and soap
grease. On account Of their much head,
and their owners want thereof, some
good may come Of the association. II
the winter is very cold, these gentle, dry
land crocodiles should be nicely wrapped
up in patch. wofk bed quilts, made BY the
longest tongued missionary sewing soci.
city in the neighborhood, with rcd Gro.
chet bolster.cases drawn over their tails,
and put under the children's trundle bed
Give them whiskey- cocktails to proven,
cholera. in the summer. An occasional
run in the cabbage aud potato patch. with
dog swinging to each ear, will helI
them amazingly. Avoid the Berkshire
Chester. w hite, Poland. China, and othci
fairs and auction.sales. They are oil
humbugs. Stick to the Saurian sort, II
they burst you. We like to see farmer
show spunk and persev erance even 10 I'D
herring to old fooleries.
CATrLE.-As the tax gatheror will soon
be among you, this 10 q good season for
crossing stock. Take one huge, forty
horse. 20 wer cuss, and cross it With your
neighbours blue streaked ,cuss ct the size
of lis delinquent tar. bill. Then get q
long, gaunt, viscious, wild Texas bull.
with horns seventeen yards long, and or.
ty feet OF tail, and let him run with your
cattle In the course OF human events.
you will have herd that will be heard
Of BY this time you will not need to
cross cussss with anybody, for you will
have plenty OF use for oil your own and
you can drive 500 Of these hook.an
crook monsters to town any day and sell
the whole lot for enough TO keep you in
whiskey money six months. Beware OF
those tame animals called Durhams, Al.
derneys and Short Horne. What 10 the
use OF raising short horns, when you can
just as easily have horns ~ long IS your
liquid ones arc deep aud frcquent2 They
do not becomsa plain, independent Tar
mer.
HoRsEs.-Ah, now we can advise you
advisedly. II there 10 anything We do
know anything about, it is . horse.
whether trotting. horse, dray horse, old
wheel. horse Of democracy, hobby horse,
clothes horse, wood-horse, or horse Of
another color. You want . horse-no,
that is not it; you want y F." boss" Re-
member, they are two very different ami.
mails. A horse is worth anywhere from
$500 when q yearling, to $4,000 when a
four year old; but you can buy boss
of any age. any time, at any figure from
Is cents to S42. One for 8I3,25 10 all
you need You do not wish to put on
style; Of course not; 80 you buy boss
frame, and 60 to work to build on 1t; but
at the end OF the wear you see that every
thing he eats runs into his legs and head,
and that everywhere else he is thinner,
simmer aud more contemplate than
when you first began to construct him,
aud that you are several hundred dollars
poorer in feed. This will give you an.
other excellent opportunity to cuss the
internal taxes and hard times, and take a
" sweetner' all round.
DoNKEYs.-If, with all your own stub
bornness in sticking to wrong courses
and notions, you want to go into the
mule raising. business, get none but the
purest imported Maltese thorough bred
(ackanapes with wings on his head for a
nestegg, The largest, the full-bloodest.