The New York herald., 1878-02-24
CHAT BY THE WAY.

CHAT B1 InE WA1.
real Christian respects himself % much that he
can't be selfish.
Emerson says that a man touches hsrdpsn when
be gets beyond wondering how be keep his neigh
Dor from cheating him and begins TO wondbr how he
can keep himself from cheating his neghbor.
City appoint ments very lavishly bestowed now
sdays, VI We may use the language Of the unworldiy
old lady declared with great Joy that her nephew
had just been appointed q bankrupt
The Hndoos have an idea that all souls are small
In the German folk lore they are known as "thumb-
lings.n A quiet observation Of human nature under
certain circumstauces-as for instance when tho con-
trbutiou box Is being passsd-shows that the idea 10
not entirely without foundation.
The finest detective force in the city has been over
rocked II does belong TO the police, but to The
Dutch Consistory. 1t has found out whether Row. Me-
Lloyd prefers sausagss mutton chops for breakfast
and whether he pays Tor them with religious punctu-
Atty; whether he prefers iignt wine or lager beer.
and often he visits mis- parishionsrs and whether
be takes his Tea strong or weak Every church ought
to have detective force Of this kind TO watch the
minister. 1t must be very encouraging TO pastor to
feel that 10 shadowed" every time be posts letter
or buys box Of piila The question that naturally
arises. however, is, Who will watch the watcnerss
Among tho savages OF Queensland sscona marriages
are attended with some nconvenence. II Is preva-
lent belief among hom that the ghost OF number one
hovers about In jealous sort OF way to see that his
will passes through the probate Office properly, ana
to keep OF number two until the conventional season
grief passed. and that OF 'uitieaied bereave-
menl" sets in. The widow, however, runs round the
house with a handful OF twigs, beating the air aud
driving away the disemboded intruder and then set
ties down to a reconstructed family and new trial Of
happiness misery, as the case may be-
The matter OF preserving the Old South has become
very serious to the Bostonans. The pocketbooks OF
the new generation appreciate the relics Of the
past, and It proposed 10 kill two birds with one
stone by building block of stores and putting the
OLD South the roo.. This Is, however, only halt
measure. The better way would be TO suspend the
churcn in the an with balloon ascepts at regular
intervals. One oil tho hardest things have to do
s TO pay any respect to tho past Our fathers had
good time and gone. Now let US clear away the
ground and have another good tImo all to ourselves
Is our motto.
When a man marres wife for the sake OF her
Tather's money anu returns from his honey moon TO
And that the old gentleman has Just paid thirty cents
the dollar be apt TO feel that Mr. Bescher and
Colonel lngersoll are misleading guides
The question to be settled just now by European
statesmen Is whether England Russia the right
tul Bosphorus.
The Christian Advocate says that great many min
preaching without notes and like the prac-
tice eknow OF somo who are living without notes
and who don't like It. They are compelled to cat
shortcake al the time indeed, IT'S very short it
won't 60 round.
Iit Is wicked to catch fish Sunday, which nobody
will deny how does the law aGect a person who
fishes all day and doesnt oven get nibbieS
If your minister not preach we'll enough don't
go the rounds Of the parish with prolonged grumble
but just send him books containing the best
thoughts Of the times. 1t will give TO the
braiu cells and cheer his heart.
The photograph is an invention Of great impor-
lance. You speak to little revolving cynuer, and
having finished, bottle your speech up Tor further
A year afterward 1t will give you back every word
you have said, and voice loud enough TO be heard
In large room. famous lecturer. or a
clergyman who has contVc,ed the bronchitis, can
send bottled essay 10 the pulpit lecture room,
and, as the jantor turns the crank, the sloquence
viii be reproduced. When clersymon ''exchange"
they need DO At personal Inconvenience tor they
send their sermons BY sxpress; xnd when we
have great orator statesman barrel up his
speeches ana hand them down TO future generatious
Modern science seems TO be able do every
cept persuade the to pay 100 the
dollar. 1nat appears be utterly beyond its reach
The Esquimaux have q beautiful custom. When
little child dles they lay dogs head In the same
grave under the impression that wnen tho child
wakes up 1t can't q nd its way 70 the habitatons
Of the just and that the instincts OF tho dog will lead
II thitheE
All sorts of excuses are madc for using the funeral
baked meats for the marriage table OF u second ven-
turs poor darky. who had not waited the ap.
pointed time the emu which grief may be said to
have expended ITSELF chidcd by bis deacons for
his haste. He made two declarations which are sug.
gestive-Firs that the "Scripturs hab plenty prom
ses widder am none fur do widsreE &c judged
thence that the Lord didn't waste sympathy on
who had "fuss rate chance" TO comfort himself
Second, that 'Poor Betsey was just as dead as she
ever would be, and so there NO use In waiting
any longer.
There Is eectric shock communicated by aptiy
chosen words and Is sometimes lifted up by thee
to the plane which Lerosm is common every day
living When Napoleon explained 10 Of his staff
officers daring plan OF attack the officer ventured
to say, sit Is impossible Tbe "Litte Corporate
Tor instant Jove hin,soI. and replied, 'lmpos
sibsi Impossible s the adjective Of fools''
Intention Is everything He meant to be very con-
soing and yet words must have been uppeasantly
suggestive The called his oolored servant to
hrs side and said, "sam, I'm dying; I'm going q,
long journey.' SANS eyes were moist, but he en-
oouraged the SICK man by replying, "Nebber mind,
massor, irs all de way down hill"
Facts are iacts, even when pronounced by savage
Iipa II was peculiar notion OF the Mohawks that
some great misfortune would happen II any spoke
while crossing Saratoga Lake. A white woman, who
was ierried by Indian, talked all tho way. and
on arriving safely on the iurthcr shore rallied hor
boa,man on his superstition. He simply grunted
"rhe Great Spirit Is ercul and knows that the pale
face woman cannot hold her tongue" and then re-
crossed tue lake IN silence.
The students at Princeton acting the obsolete
principle that the mission of college Is TO teach the
youu idea how to shoot. Colts revolvers form an
important part OF their curriculum. and when fresh
man declines being tied hand aud foot and having his
head shaved, all In sport the sophomorss take their
position at the requisite distance ana If they
perforats him twice out OF three President McCosh
not born In Scotland, however, Tor nothing The
number OF students will be smaller but order will be
greater In q very short time.