The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-07-25
SCRAPS.

WILKrE COLLINS spends as much |
money as he earns. Shake, Wilkie, my |
boy, there's big gang of rs.
SENIOR is questioned-"What is the |
name of that Young lady to whom you
are engaged" Senior blandly responds
(Which one?"
Somebody must raise 1872, 600 tons of |
tobacco next year, or the population of |
the globe will be deprived of its aunual |
supply.
OVER at the exposition they are laying |
up something for a rainy day-Not an
umbrella, but Paris-haul.
A MAN should always know who is at |
the other end of the wire before he let's |
himself out over telephone
FRIESD-(To scientific authority: |
doctor, how is q man to tell a mush
room from a toadstool?" Scientific au-
thority: ''By eating it. If you live,
it is a mushroom; if you die it is toad
STOOL"
''DoN'T stand there loafing" said the
master of grammar school to three
students standing where they shouldn't.
Were not loating," said one of them;
'there are only three of Us, and it takes
ieyen to make loaf"
Emily, how do you do?" "I'm
very well, Julia; celebrated my wooden
wedding, last week." You? Why,
didn't know you were married. How
did you celebrate?" 'By marrying a
blockhead."
1t is Massachusetts editor who cries
out, GIVE us back the Sun-bonnet of
our grandmother" We haven't seen
his grandmother's sun-bonnet, and we
don't believe his daughter would wear
it We're he to get it back.
Conscience is a clock, which in one
man strikes aloud and gives warning,
in another the hand points silently to
the figure but strikes not; meantime,
hours pass away, and death haStens,
and after death comes judgement.
Eyes, Sir" yelled a preacher in a
Dakota church, one Sunday morning."
there's more lying and swearing and
stealing and general deviltry to the
square inch in this here town than n
all the rest of the American country"
and then the congregation got up and
dumped the preacher out of the win
dow.
Some one who was going to fancy
ball once asked Compton's opinion as
to an appropriate dress. Said he,
Demons are over-done, or l should
like to 60 with horns and pitchfork;
but think it would be an excellent
idea to go as Il rattlesnake. What dc
you think?" well, "replied Compton,
81 think that you might manage the
eoise. but doubt the fascination"
A Kaw Indian named Doane, con-
victed of pony stealing, was publicly
logged at the Kaw Agency, Indian Ter
ritory. Seven braves were appointed
by the Council to do the flogging, and
the prisoner after being stripped, was
led into circle formed by the chiefs
and braves, and surrounded by the
squaws and pupils of the mission
school, and was whipped by each of
the seven.
4 YOUNG man on being asked by his
sweetheart why the continued flow of so
many rivers into the sea did not fill up
the sea and make it run over, replied,
"Why, it's the sponges, my dear.
'What have the sponges to do with it?''
she asked. To which he responded,
"Why, the sea is full Of sponges, way
down at the bottom, aud they suck up
the water-don't you see?
YOUNG man if she futters out to meet
you at the gate with new cordiality-if
she remarks that "eleven O'Clock isn't a
bit late If she invites you to call again
III confidential earnestness-if she saws
good night with gentle pressure of her
dear little hand-if she does all these
things, young man, be not deceived
The strawberry and ice cream season is
here.
HERE is no ridiculous nonsense about
the honaet Deadwoodians. The most
vigorous waltzer at dance there last
week excused himself at half past IL be
cause he had a stage coach to rob at u.
What rebuke this is to our giddy, pro-
crastinating, self-indulgent votaries of
pleasure. That man is bound to rise
even If the whole community have to pull
on the rope.
AN extradlted Mexican, Pablo Parras,
was hung at Corpus Christi on the 18th
instant for murder committed in 1870
He died cursing the government of Tex
as, and shouting, "Ii0a Ne1icoy VIea
'Nericanos" There was one Meutcaro |
whose life was suddenly choked off for /
the benefit of civilization, and it's pity of |
their lives that more of them don't 90 the |
same way.
Every year witnesses curious sand
showers in China, when there is Meth
er cloud nor fog in the sky. The sun is
scarcely visible looking very much az
when seen through smoked glass.
The sand penetrates houses, reaching
apartments which seem securely closed.
1t is supposed to be canied 10y whrl-
winds from the great desert of Cobb
and the storms are indicative of a year
of large fertility.
In the State Of Mississippi there are
nlnety-two newspapers, whose combined
circulation is about G0,000. In Arkan-
gas there saI.elltu naIxS,aa ,aeI:S Iyhosa !