Weekly Trinity journal., 1878-12-21
JOE's WIFE.
BY MRS. EMBREE.

d" NV dear old chum," the letter run,
| write for the purpose of inviting you
to visit us. Don't refuse. Ny wife
heartily seconds the invitation. All,
Tom, she is jewel-my wife. l know
if you could meet such one you would
succumb and torswear bachelorhood -
She is the dearest, sweetest, best temper
ed, lovelest-the English language falls
me here, but as you were always better
than l at the Unabridged, l bcseech of
you to look therein for some endearing
adjectives, and complete the sentence. =
You, who sing about the felicity OF n
Bachelor Hail. when you have seen my
happy home will change your tune. You
must come, Tom. | went take refusal.
Yours ETC., JoE HALL"
answered his letter thus
MY DEAR JOE II thought when /
last saw you | could never be tempted to
jeopardize my peace ofmind or my bones
by again placing myself at tho mercy OF
your Internal practca jokes. But have
no other recourse now than TO accept your
invitation. You must promise me, my
dear fellow, you will not play any Of
your jokes. A married man ought to be
moro dignifed, and if you do play any Of
your tricks ca me, warn you, / shall
board the first tram for home. Yours,
TON THURsTsN."
| went. | was met at tho train by ,Joe's
servant, man who had long body,
dressed in long coat, long waistcoat,
long neck-tie, a long hat, long boots, and
whose name was Long. l instinctively
hated the man. lie scrrtinIzed mo close.
ly /; | returned the scrunity. He watched
my every movement like detective
would supposed criminals l watched
his every movement like timid man
would a vicious cannes. His voice in
intonation was in length comparable TO
the length of his body ; my voice in
length of intonation when addressing
this man was comparable to the length
Of the body Of Liliputian.
We At length reached Joe's house. |
anticipated Joes welcome, but in his
place came the loveliest woman | ever
beheld. 1t is true, as Joe said, | was
always fluent in language, but to this day
| cannot find words to satisfy me in dos
crbing her surprising beauty.
Joe, Joe," thought | "i it is lucky
for you that yoG met her first"
You are Mr.. Thurston ?" she asked,
tmdly approaching me, and shyly
glancing at mo from under her dropping
eyelids. l informed her / was that per-
sonage, and inquired for Joe.
For answer that gentleman himself
dashed up on horseback, sprang from the
saddle, grasped my hand, and, like the
irrepressi lille Joe Of old, cried
"Glad to SEQ you, old boy Wen have
glorious good tmes as Of old. Wo'l
hunt, fish, smoke, etc., till you grow SO
fat, hale and hearty, that your most in
innate city friends won't know you.-
Come, let's 90 in, tea is waiting. Par
don me for not introducing you, but l
supposed you introduced yourself in my
absence. Apropos, it WAS inhospita Bile
in nae to absent myself on your arrival,
bat business called me away"
SO ra ttling on Joe ushered us ints the
cosiest little parlor that ever poor bach
elor was called upon to envy. But the
cosy little wife What was the envy Of
the room, with all its adornments, To the
envy OF such wife ? Mus. l admit it
i may as we'll right here as any further
period Of my rectal-I felt strange
thrill at my heart. 1t was .hrill of eI-
quisite pain-a thrill Of jealousy of Joe's
happiness.
"Joe," l mentally cried, &" bettor. far
better for me had l declined your invita-
tion."
Presently we had most refreshing
supper, after which Joe and / strolled
out for walk and smoke.
Joe" exclaimed, enthusiastically,
"your encomiums of your wife were
merited. She is indeed treasure. BY
Jove, if / could find such jewel would
never rest till won and married her."
Joe was on the point of lighting his
cigar when | began, but paused with up
raised match until had fnished-and
the match burned his fingers. thought
for time he was angry at my impetuos-
ity, but his face cleared away, and the
old wicked tWfhke that feared so much
spraDg to his eyes. He graspcd my
hand saying,