davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Barney Sohner has removed to his farm in
Mt Pleasant, and j. l.. Girton has taken
charge of the hotel recently kept by Stohner
Mr.. Girton is well known by travelling men
and will undoubtedly keep hotel worthy of a
fair share Of public patronage
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
THIRD MONDAY.

Boom-Wm. Wintersteen, Geo. A. Clark,
w. o. Holmes, w. w, Barrett, Michael Casey,
Jr., Henry Sloan, Levi W. Cox, George A,
Herring, C. S, Fornwald; Benton-Eli Nc
Henry Briarcreek-J. r. Mosteller; Catawis-
sa-H. j. Reed er, g. W, Reilsnyder, VIM. Mil
Ter, George A. Scott; Centralia--John Spring
Fishingcreek-Samuel Thomas Greenwood
Isaac Heacock Hemloek-John p. Guild
Daniel Nocum Jackson Samuel Yocum Lo-
cust-Iienry ii. Rhodes, Enoeh KesIer; Madi
son-Albert Girton, Robert Manning Mifilr
WIN. Greasy, b. s, Workheiser; Montour-
John q. Quick; Mt. Pleasant-Wm, Grimes
Orange-H. j, Conner Pine-John Bruner
John W. Dawald Scott-H. ii. Brown, vii
lets Hartman Sugarloaf-C. l.. Moore, VIM
Peterman.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
Admission free at McKinney's.

Royal Safeguard Oil gives the safest yct
most brilliant light of any oil in the world
For sale at ID. A. CreaSy's, the only place il
town where it can be had. Erery one sho"h
try IT,
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

That old and popular remedy, familiar in
every household throughout the land, known
as DIR. Coxe's Hive Syrup, is now Superseded
by Or. Coxe's Wild Cherry and Seneka which
and crnun
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

TEMPERANCE MEErINas.-Iiereafter the
Gospel Temperance Meetings will be held on
Tuesday evenings. That of next week will
meet at the Baptist Church at 1880 p. m.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Hon. L. j. MclIenrv will please accept our
thanks Tor copies of the reports Of the Adjutant
General, State Treasurer, and Superinten
dent of Public instruction for 1917
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

March 18th is st. Patr'ck's Day. All the
places Of business in town will be closed.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
Rail Road Time Table.

Rev. Prof Walter +. Krebs preached in the
Reformed church last Sunday.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Next Wednesday is Ash Wednesday, the
first day Of Lent.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

There will be Masque Ball at Cadman's
hall on the evening of March 4th "Maskews"
are growing fashionable.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Mr.. James Corrie, Dentist, in Baltimore,
writes 81 have used DR.. Bulls Cough Syrup
personally and in my family for two or three
years, and | am prepared to say that there is
Colds, etc.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

From the Adjutant Generals Report we
learn that Columbia county has 1921 militia
enrolled and subject to military duty
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
}IAN AND DEMOCRAT LOOMSBURG COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA.

Reflect that in every cemetery Of the silent
tenants are the victims of neglected Coughs
and colds, and If you are thus afflicted, orOid
their fate by resorting at once TO Hdies Honey Of
Horehound and Tar, an immediate, agreeable,
aud certain means of cure. Sold by all Drug
gists. Pixies Toothache Drops cure in a min
ute.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

From Main TO Mexico, the farmers speak in
praise of the great medicinal worth of Foutz's
Horse and Cattle Powders. They speak from ex-
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

John Ikeer of Van Camp and family have
removed to Three Rivers Michigan where
they will take up their residence.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
Business Notices.
Call at McKinneys ior Shoes.

Call at Nlckinneys ior Shoes.
j. f. Caldwell is increasing the size of
his Loaves and lowering the price to 10 cts.
and for 10.
Best white Dishes 1915 per set at 1. W |
Hartmans.
A new lot of Dress Paids at Lutz &
Sloan's, price 10 to 10 cents a yard.
American Watches in heavy coin silver
cases warranted for two years for twenty
dollars at l.. Bernhard's popular jewelry
store. feb. - If
Ladies Pin Stripe Hose at /. w. Hart
mans.
p. s Bates, icwcller and matchmaker make,
a speciality of repairing. All work done by
him is sure to give perfect satisfaction.
--
The large stock of Clocks. Watches ard sill.
verware received by 7. 5. Bates only u month
or two ago is being very rapidly reduced by his
extensive sales at the lowest possible prices.
| Pleasant as honey, the old folks like it the
| young people like it and the babies cry for
| tive mean DIR. Frazier's Cough Syrup. If
Boots and Shoes cheap at McKinney's.
| ~--
Best Calico cents cash or produce at l..
W. Hartman's.
GRAND FURNITURE SALE MARCH 9th
OF SOLID BLACK WALNUT SUITS,
/ PAINTED SUITS and Extension Ia
blcs, wood seat Chairs and cane.seatod
| Chairs, Lounges, Looking. 9 asses. Cup.
boards Sinks, Bedsteads Brackets, Picture
Frames and Chromos.
The above Furniture is New and of the
latest styles neither secondhand nor cheap
ly made. sale at 10 o'clock Il. m. at Cad
mans Furniture Store
Lutz & Sloan will have more of those fin
ished white Shirts this week for 70 cents
each,
Boot headquarters at McKinney's.
Frazer's Root Bitters and Cough Syrup
| with remarkable success. If
The Royal Safeguard Oil at d, A. Greasy
is all the go.
Ifyou have watch, clock, or any kind Of
jewelry or silverware to repair. take it to p. S
Bates who always gives perfect satisfaction.
Boss Cigars, , for cents, at ID, A. Crea
sys.
Rubbers at McKinney's.
Butter, Eggs Lard and Dried Fruit bough
and sold at |. w. Hartman's.
McKinneys Shoe Store below Cour
House.
Since the discovery of Dr. Williams In
dian Ointment there is certainly no excuse
tof any one to suffer with the Piles. See ad
vertsement If
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

From January l,t 1877 to January lst 1875
the COLUMBIAN olice averaged che job lor
every workisg day. Making in all over lUO,-
600 impressions. Although not large, this l.
good lor the hard times, aud shows that the
people know where to get their printing done
i'll the nea est manner and at lhs lowest rates.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
BERWICK ELECTION.


The following are the officers elected, 10 gil
the various positions in that borough: Chief
Burgess--John McAnall. Assistant Burgess
II. c. Freas Town Coupcil-W. b. Freas
John NJ. Moorhead, NJ. W. Jackson Isaiah
Bower Samuel Bender, j. +. Opdyke. School
Directors-J. f. Eyerly, and Benjamin Hicks.
Assessor-Alexander Thompson. Inspectors
Michael Thornton and W. NJ. Rredbenner
Judge Of Election--G. II. Wells. Overseers OF
Poor-O. IL. p. Kitchen and Levi Kurtz. Au-
ditor-L. T. Thompson Constoble-J. G..
Jacoby. High C)nstableG. f. Chamber
lain.
I. V. Powderly the Labor Partys candi-
date was elected Mayor Of Scranton,
by 524 majority with the entire ticket for
city officers Last fall the party had over
1000 majority. The Select Council stands
Citizens ticket, IA Labor Reform, 6; Com
mon Counci-Citzens', 20 Labor, % School
Controllers-Citzens, s; Labor, l2.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
DON'T NEGLECT A CUlIGH
TO coNsUMPTIVEs.

or Cold, when 25 cents will buy bottle OF Dr. Fra
Xer's Cough syrup at any drug store II has
wrought complete change In the Cough Medicines,
is pleasant as honey and always cures.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
'"i'''''' 3s5!s 50 1851 50 G23 10 ls6ls IS GAG 90
MOUNTS DUE FOR PREVIOUS YEARS

funds
1877 fR.
Jan. |, To amt. uncollected prior to
ls77 ......................... slS,4339l
Tonrnt on hand at last settlement l,26g ~
" county and Jail tax XaSscsSed tor II 3s,5!S ~
tuX on rppistrv of voters tor 1877. A. 80
tax added to collectors accounts. 81 u
VIM llIlme, Benton poor overscer
for Collrvs ..,....'.............. 1000
To note discounted ut bank......... l,97s a.
" notr discounted Mt bank renewed l,psi SS
l,7a6 II
" J Sands for case of pigeon holes 80
II noak Baker. collectors entry
fee. ,.,..........,............. 30
~, u l. I'm, i,,,,. rn,l IN
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
COURTS, JURORS rAYASp ooSsTtnIr
COSTS IN COMMONWEALTH "a

COSTS IN COMMONWEALTH CASES,
WHERE COUNTY BECAME LIABLE
Pald 10 justices, constablcs and wit
:, ~ nesn'5 ...,;.....;.;;.,,.. 2,i70S0
hoons, jury board, Hester
a. trlal ,';;;,...,,,, ,;....,....; ;,..,,,,. s38 %
Jno NJ CLARK allowance by court
TO attend supreme courtiM Hes
a yer ulal l''.'.'..,.,;,,..,,,......,, 100 90
q Potter, paper book for same 95 90
John Nj Clark ,Disu lot Attorney MI OO
a - .t, IaIh snLl,,;,';,,:''...,....., nLl, liG a5
9hclln HUFFMAN blll',,..,,,,.. 36s5
sS,295 10
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
s3G,23G 22


Deduct from amount Of orders issued s4ss Is
taxes refunded Sl4agt paid for the support or
Mary aud Alex. tOley AT Danyile Asylum tNd
$50, 2a6 % hls paid on new county prison, leaves
S24 lo2 s., the real expenses for the year for the
county outside OF the prison building. Bridge
expenses this year are low. The court expenses
aud commonwealth costs are much larger than
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

W. II. TacOby. recording deed............. 225
c. :. Wetzel Architect, on account........ S25 on
Geo. A, Clark, kilograms .................... 40
$. Neyhart, surveying lot .. ................ 800
Advertisement In phia. LEDGER 90. ......... 4 90
+. Mentcnhall, lumber for tool house,. % 20
RunNan Co., bell locks. &C ............,..,.. 2g6
G. krug rt al digging foundation. ......... Isl 20
erncr Jones on contra t..............2 - O2S 90
Rollins Holmes. ..............,...... :, $50 65
Cruikshark Meyer & Co , on contract .... ,s52 20
ChaS, krug on contract. g9 ~
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

lSQuISITtOSs.
.. G. Murphy, inquest on body OF men 20 Oh
coleman i"on'lo II 90
Roberts '''''' . .' ,.'. II 81
Wm. h.. Robbins, post mOrtcm on same. 10 40
lhlhn Harris inquest ON j, p. COnuerNNlle ~ -
q q. Murphy inquest on Th0s Flanagan ~ SO
!, h. Hartman, inquest On sarah snyder, %
Jacob TerwilliEcr, Inquest on John Van
lltN 20 ui
Asa Yuris, inquest on |. D. MeudcnLll.. " 80
slsl ~
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

LAM NOl b., rith OfSIlhouezemptios
~ tor Asle III the ooIUkAIAs Cmpe.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Boss Cigars, , for cents, at D. A. Cres
sv's
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Best Calico cents cash or produce at |.
W. Hartman's.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01


$S3l ~
The Indebtedness one year ago was SSl65 i2.
Now sTt4 % due from collectors with $l2G 60 In
the hands Of the Treasurer, make 1891 ~ The
Indebtedness is Ssl4 2j, leaving a difference In
favor OF said tund Of Sl6 81. Last year the iu-
debtedness was fiGi l2 and sl6 - amount now
due said fund show gain during the year OF
$751; 90. The above statement shows that Fish.
iuEcreek, Madison, Orange and SugarlOar con-
sumed the principal OF the fund .The heavy
damages run in localities for certain periods Of
tlmr. NOW II all persons, and especially Audi
or make the persons who own such dogs and re-
fuse 10 have them killed pay the damage the
FUND would be In good condition ana again IL
the taxes were collected sheep orders could DC
paid as soon as issued. We hope that this Will
receive proper attention.
COUNTY FINANCES
ASSETS.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Butter, Eggs. Lard and Dried Fruit bougl
and sold at |. w. Hartman's.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01
GRAND FURNITURE SALE MARCH 9l
OF SOLID BLACK WALNUT SUITS,

If you have watch, clock, or any kind Of
jewelry or silverware to repair. take it to p. S.
Bates who always gives perfect satisfaction.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

McKinneys Shoe Store below Court
House.
Since the discovery of Dr. Williams In
dian Ointment there is certainly no excuse
tof any one to suffer with the Piles. See ad-
vertisement If
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-03-01

Pleasant as honey, the old folks like it the
young people like it and the babies cry for
tive mean DR.. Frazier's Cough Syrup. If
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10
How to Detect Married People:

The Deer Lodge (Montana) Neu
Northwest lays down the following rules
If you see a lady and gentleman dis
agree upon trifing occasions, or cor
recting each other in company, you
may be assured they have tied the mat
rimonial moose.
If you see silent pair in car or
stage lolling carelessly, one at each
window, without seeming to know they
have a companion, the sign is in
falllble.
TlIf you see lady drop her glove and
a gentleman by the side of her, kindly
telling her to pick it up, you need not
hesitate in forming your opinion; or,
If you see lady whose beauty and
accomplishments attract the attention
of every gentleman in the room but
one, you have no difficulty in deter
mining their relationship to each other
the one is her husband.
If you see a gentleman particularly
courteous, obliging and good-natured,
relaxing into smiles, saying sharp things
and toying with every pretty woman
in the room, excepting one, to whom
he appears particularly cold and formal,
and is unreasonably cross-who that
one is, nobody can be at loss to dis
cover.
The rules above quoted are laid down
as infallible in just interpretation-they
may be resorted to with confidence, they
are upon unerring principles, and de-
Quoted from every day experience.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10
What Came of Getting Married.

A reporter of the New York Sun has
been quizzing the ancient mariners.
cam | married." quoth Jack in pro-
found amazement. Am [ married
No, amt. Are you?" The reporter
confessed that he was not, and some
what Modified, the old sailor contin-
ued:
why. [ had mate once as was as
fine sailor as ever reefed a tops'l. He
spent money when he had it, an when
it was gone he hadn't no need to go
begging for the best berth in any ships
fo'-castle. For twenty years, man and
boy, he never stepped foot on a deck
'cept she was square-rigged. Steam
ers! Well, he had bout as much opin-
ion of 'em as L have. Well, as luck
would have it, poor Tom ran afoul of
a bit of calico, here in New York, a
couple O years ago, when we was just
in from round the Cape. She carried
too much for Tom, and before I was
knowing it he caved and asked me if
I'd step up to Parson Marphy's with
him and be a witness. And what dye
think Toms adoin' now? Shipped
aboard teakettle running between
here and the Islands West Indies) and
putin money in the bank. To be sure
he's second mate; but what's second
mate of teakettle? I'd sooner swab
decks under canvas"
The old sailor paused, relit his pipe,
and looked about as much as to say,
'You see to what depths a married
sailor NAV descend"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10
New Orleans Picayune.

Here is story illustrative OF the fact
that tears are powerful weapon in the
hands of a Observation-Disclosures mod
ern Niobe. There was a southern mer-
chant, a handsome, dashing fellow, who
astonished all his relatives q few years
ago, by marrying a very plain girl, the
sister of his business partner. The
marriage turned out reasonably happy,
but it has always remained mystery
to the society bellies, who were ready to
fall into his arms at a word. 1t was
tears land not " idle tears") that trapped
him. One evening he called at his
partners house, and found only the
young lady at home. Very artfully she
led the conversation to her own affairs,
and told him that she was perfect
slave to her sister, tyrannized over and
ill-treated, that life had become such a
burden to her that she should rid herself
of it unless she could change her home.
The visitor tried to comfort her, but in
vain. Marriage was very. far from his
thoughts then, and he had no love to
give anywhere. Niobe's tears fell faster
and faster, and at last they came in a
hysterical torrent. His CALCULATIONS of
sympathy were in vain, when she cried:
"Oh, where shall [ go? who will give me
4 home?" 81 would if dared offer it,
poor girl" said the male victim, and
quick rs lightning the response: "What
would my sister say if you married mew
What could the man do under such cir
cumstances? A tolerably fair face was
lying on his bosom, a pair of grateful.
loyiTlo owes (Shn did love him, daor1vl
were looking up into his own, and del
icate little hand had sought and found
his. He did what any disengaged gen
tleman would have been likely to do
pressed his suit, secured her unreluctant
consent, informed her sister Of it, mar
ried her, and did his best to make her
happy. She, in her turn, made him
good wife. Little by little he discovered
her stratagem-but he never told his
wife of it.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10

live on the savings of the industrious.
In other countries all sturdy beggars
are set at work for the state, the county
or the city where they are found. In
foreign capitals the eye is greeted with
long lines of these parasites, with an
overseer, cleaning the streets, building
sewers, cutting roads, ana taking care
of public property. The spectacle
may shock an American at first, es-
peclally if some who have added Grim
inality to beggary should appear at
tached to a restraining ball and chain
but the general influence of the habit
is wholesome. An able-bOdied person
has no right to live on his fellow men,
and if he will not work voluntarily, he
should be compelled to do so. Every
state IN the Union ought to empower
Its town officers to arrest all beggars
and put them at work for the benefit of
the community. All the roads in the
country might be kept in fine condition
by the enforced labor of the tramps.
who now use them to so little purpose.
The world owes no man Il living. 1t
does not owe him even a coffin, though
it may provide him with one for sweet
charitys sake. Baltimore is holding
meetings to decide what MARYLAND
ought to do with her tramps. 1t ought
to arrest them and set them to work.
This country offers labor to all who will
do it, and the industrious and frugal
ought to be relieved of the support of
loafers who follow mendicancy as a
professionalism York Graphic.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10
OLD 81 ON HE'LL.
No Rubbing 1t Out.-.Not Gwine to Leabe
Dis Worl' to Play SnOw-Ba
Atlanta Constitution J..


While they were resting from work
at noon yesterday Amos said:
& heah'd er white man readin' in
de paper dis mornin' dat foxes wuz
'batin' now whudder dere wuz emmy hell
or not"
"Shucks?" said old ST; 'you'se got
dat wrong eend fo'must, sho !"
"No, sab, dat wuz what he red in de
paper ("
peated ST.
"Yas, sab; whudder when er man
give out up hyar he went ter hell, er
Jess dissolved ter dus' aginr'
"Lookie heah I! [ don't want no
'spute wild nobody, but eff emmy man
come foolin' round me wild dat sorter
skriptur he's gwine ter heah me git up
yander inter shoutin' tones !" said 81.
"Why is dat?"
''Kaise faint gwine ter do ! Yer jess
make er niger belebe dar Amt no heah-
arter an see what yer comes ter. Eb-
cry secon' house'll be er court house,
an de houses twiXt 'em II be jale
houses. Hits moughty hard ter keep
em strate now wild de sheriff an hell
bofe fore dar eyes p'
"Den you'se on de side OBJ de fab an
brimstonew
"You'se right, honey! Eff you tink
you'se gwine ter leebe dis wurld ter play
SNOWFALL somewhat you'se 'rong. Oars
er warm place jess beyant heah fer de
managers OBJ de freedman bank an
chicken filters ginrully, else Use gwine
ter swap my him book fer er pack Ell
kyards.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10
CONSUMPTION of Tobacco.

The Tobacco Plant says "The entire
mass of tobacco which is annually CON
sumed in smoking, snuffing, and in
chewing on the earth is four billion of
pounds, manifestly too high an estimate
for from twelve to fifteen hundred mil
lions of inhabitants Let us take the
half as the more probable, and let us
suppose the tobacco leaves transformed
into roll tobacco, tobacco serpent is
created which, with a diameter OF two
inches, and following the direction Of
the equator. could wind itself around
the earth thirty times. Let us suppose
that the tobacco is formed into tablets
similar to the chocolate tablets, and
which, indeed, is the shape which the
chewing tobacco of sailors and Yankees
takes, and we have colossal pile,
worthy of being placed the third largest
of the pyramids of Gizeh, that of Myk-
crimes, and as massive and as high as
that old regal edifce Let us grind all
the tobacco into snuff, and let us pic
ture to ourselves the sad case that an
evil equinoctial wind one fine morning
blows the snuff over the ocean, and
showers it on one of the German States,
we are certain more than one of the
Illiputian States would have much diff
Guilty in recovering its existence by
shOveling away the snuff"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1878-01-10
MANAGING A HUSBAND.

How shall | manage my husband:
| will tell you my dear, II l can;
He is really a wonderful creature,
That troublesome animal, Man
Yes! really wonderful creature
So strange, inconsistent and queer;
But you'll soon know the secret by learning
The modus operandi, my dear!
If he stays out too late in the evening.
Partaking of supper and wine,
Don't prove him false fabrIcator,
When he comes home by asking the time;
For he surely will tell you the town clock
But the moment before rang out one
When il struck he had counted IL over
just three times before 1t mad done
And then, if his hat, in the morning,
Is smaller by tar than his head,
Don't hint by the merest alluslon
That his lOrdship went tipsy to bed;
But rather regard the occurrence
A acknowledgement and queer
With q strange look of mystiticatlon
In your eye, if he's watching, my dear!
And don't fail to sew on his buttons.
And likewise his clothes mend WITH care;
Don't tease him for money for shopping;
Don't frown when he acts like bear;
Don't tell him too often, my deary,
That your poor head is aching with pain,
Lest he whisper way down ia his bosom,
oh wish | were single again.!
Don't tell him that Mary, the hOusemaid,
And Ann, the obstreperous cook,
Refuse to receive your suggestions
With even so much as Il look:
Don't tell him how very annoying
You often have found it to be
To be told to Get out of the kitchen,
And don't come a-botherlng me
But always seem cheerful and happy,
And always look pleasant and gay;
Than q frown there is nothing more potent
In driving ones husband away.
And thus you must ever keep striving
You'll find it an excellent plan;
But whatever you do, dear, remember
That you husband is only man.