Daily Republican., 1878-11-14
HUMOROUS.

i
nucleus for an apiary, and in tn
course Of ten days he had read tel
different works on the honey lee an
invented half dozen patent hives
The other forenoon man called at tn
house on business. and was informe,
by the wife that her husband was ou
inspecting the bees.
'Is he taking up honeys" inquire'
the man.
"Oh, no; he's looking to see II Their
are any drones in the hive"
At that instant both we're startled b,
Il series Of whoops and yells, and tn
husband came around the corner Of tn
house on the jump, his hatstriking tn
air on all sides of him. lie rnshe,
through the currant bushes and back
rolled over on the grass and lii out 70
the barn, and the AMAZED wife shaded
her eyes from the sun as she looked
after him aud continued, In a disap
pointed tone:--
"But | don't believe he found sin
gle drone, by tn. way they stick Il
him."
beautiful, beautiful silken hairn
Philip murmured fondly, toying low
ingly with one Of her nut brow
tresses; "soft as the plumage on al
eagles wing, light as the thistledowr
that dances on the summer air! Th'
summer Of sunset, the glitter Of yellow
gold, the rich red brown Of autumna
forests blend in enhancing beauty in
it," And just then 1t came of in
his hands, and he forgot just what u
say next. There was moment Of pro.
found silence, and then Aurelia took II
from him and went ont OF the room with
IL. When she came back he was gone.
They meet new, but they meet as strang.
ers, and the eyes that were wont to
beam upon each other with the
awakening love-light. now glares az
though lifs was an eternal wash day.
The Bishop preached. The congre-
CATION subsequently requested him to
publish his sermon. The Bishop was
greatly delighted. "And so," said he,
with jocose affability, to the senior
churchwarden, "the people were much
pleased, eh'" "our folks would like to
know summat about it, and" "Ah,"
the bishop complacently, 81
See; they would like to read it at homer"
Well, sir, that's what they would all
like, Co.'S here he paused, and then
added, oonfidentially--''it wor very
hot weather, you see, and. so, when
you wor prsachin' they wor all asleep"
Some few nights ago a Highlandman
allied at a railway ticket office In an
seaport town not hundred
niles from Dundee, when the last train
vas about starting, and asked for
ick-t toa place three miles beyond
where the train was going. When he
vas told by the clerk that the train did
rot go there, he remarked, "Ifshe were
o give the engine. master a saxpence
o hersel' wud she tax her hams on
he coal.hox Of her enginei II wudna
ak her far DOT o. her way"
A mean spirited Ohio man took
ourteen pound club with knot on tn.
'ad end, and got his friends to put him
n coffin and placed In vault. BY
he gray Of the morning two solitary
igur-s were seen coming along the
highway into Cincinnati. One Of them
vent lamely to the Ohio Medical College
With q lump on his head that lifted his
lat of, and the other went to a quiet
ZONE, with a spoiled club under his
Irm and the glad light Ct happy smile
h-ddine the light Of peace and duty
,vpr his honest countenancs.
In one of the Northern suburbs Of
london family was seated at dinner
when the door bell was rung. Bridget
sent to the door. It was noticed
nat she held a long parley, and it was
subsequently that there was
ome element of uncertainty in the IN.
rrview. On the return Of the servant
he master of the house said, "W-ll,
bridget, who was itY" To which Brid-
,et replied, with all the unsuspectirg
incerity of her race. at was a gentlr.
nan. sir, looking for the wrong house"
On" of the secretaries, of a Church
iissisnary Society, distinguished
nan, was about to preach at a colcr-d
when he was introduced
" the regular minister of the church,
black man, in these words: Now den,
l'se heah to inform you dat
'ruddsh Blank is gwine to preach to
on to-day. He is de Secretary Of de-
Visionary Society, a distinguished an
eloquent man-in fac my brudden,
o is snundin' brass, an tinklin'
ymbal."
Old !eutleman to troublesome boy
Look here, my boy, can you tell me
by you snay he said to be playing at
lde -and-s.ek' Troublesome boy
No, SIR" Old g-ntleman--' Because
ou are seeking a good hiding"
Necessity has no Law. .--Parson Stern
~ "Iiow could you come to church to
IHdIIItu w. 1hdb III sutu s'dlV 40
lisi" Bride (wseping): at was
ot my fault, sir never can get him
come when he's sober ~
A young man from the country, hav
& married a city vocalist, proudly
ro,- home that his wife was first
ass singer with a remarkable voice;
In fact" he wr0te, 'she has a mezzo.
prano Of unusual power and compass.
is mother immed lately answered: my
II, that is what your Aunt Keziah t
ed of. She waited too long before she q
.d been operated On. Don't delay. /.
ave it cut out at once
"This Country" remarked a traveller , !,
northwestern Iowa, ''settles up very I
pidly." "Y-a-as," replies the ma
70, nervously watching the me ve- :
ants of constable dodging along the