Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1878-04-04
7 He HER AID.
WIN. mKLLIKAN. ...
w. ". MILLHKAN,
After F1edrIca!
Coon HOPE. O.. March 25. Is.


Gated in the head of Fredrica Merrick.-
Now, the Uranium Of this wonderful head
being somewhat thicker than the author
imagines, the reflection is, in some res
poets, rather dull.
Ny attention was first directed to the
f''Chronicles" by DIR. J. Lines, of Buena
! Vista, Ohio. At first sight, thought
that perhaps it was gotten up, with no
i'll motive, by some of my special friends.
But, after perusing each line separately,
and weighing well the contents, 1 was
fully persuaded, in my own mind, that
my former conclusion was erroneous; and
feel convinced that ''Fredrica" is not as
friendly, or as truthful, as it is her priv
ilege to be.
1t seems that l have been set up for
target, and somebody's ''air-gun" has
been most unscrupulously turned upon
me; and while, doubtless, they think
they have struck center, and the man is
up, they may now send boy to get the
dart and prepare to shoot again. Erred
rica," show your colors.
When Satan appeared unto Eve in the
garden of Eden, he appeared in disguise,
because he knew he was doing something
mean; and ever since, when individuals
have anything that is not just the clean
thing to present to the public, they con-
ceal the truth by practicing deception
Green-shutter people are everywhere to
be found, and green people, who need
shutters, are not less numerous.
OF course, E.Fredrica" did not intend
to misrepresent things, nor to avoid tell
ing them exactly as they occurred, but
the best of folks are liable to be mistaken,
and F'Fredrica" is not an exception to the
general rule. If her honor please, then,
she will allow me to correct certain mis-
take made in the outset. Although the
author seems to be quite familiar with
the Scriptures, and has diligently em-
plOyed Bible phraseology to express her
thoughts, yet, for the respect 1 have for
the ''Sacred Book,'' most earnestly in
sist that the "Chronicles of Good HOpe''
are no part of inspiration.
''Fredrica' said, ''After school had pro-
gressed many days, the Directors came
together, and said one unto another: Lift
up thine eyes, oh my brother, and be-
hold, our children doth go to school by
tens and by twenties, and our school-room
cannot hold them by reason of their great
multitude"
| Furthermore, sEFredrica'' saith: 'EAnd
it came to pass that one lifted up his voice
and saith: Men and brethren, what shall
we do? And one James, commonly called
the Bishop, arose and saith Brethren,
our painful condition doth weigh heavily
on my nina, and I am bereft of sleep,
and Beckie's heart is grieved because of
my untasted victuals. Now, behold, as
l worked among my broom-corn and
brooms, the thought came to me to pro-
cure an assistant to aid James, that
our children may still partake of the wis
dom that so constantly droppeth from his
lips.''' This is all true, with the excep-
tions, that no such conversation ever
occurred; Beckie's heart was not grieved,
James did not lose his appetite, no voices
were lifted up, nobody wept, and the SER
vices of the assistant were procured on
the very same day that Mr.. Kelso was en-
ployed as chief pedagogue.
The would-be inspired writer very un-
tremendously charges me with having g
disturbed the public worship, by looking
across the church, detracting the young
lady's attention, insomuch that she was
unable to remember the text. For this 1
am heartily sorry.
But "Fredrica's' most humiliating in
sinuation, centers in the fact that I was
wholly incompetent to select suitable
companion. Hear her:
s'Now it came to pass that when James
saw their devotion, he and one Abraham,
sirnamed Baker, did lay their heads to-
gether, and after they had consulted to-
gether, they did say Verify, it is good
thing, for Sammy may be a preacher, land
>, Jennie will be help-meet for him." etc,
e ''Now after this it came to pass that James
: did invite him to his house often" This,
''Fredrica,'' is without foundation or, to
use the mildest term can think of, antrue
Neither DIR. Baker nor James Harper en-
couraged me; and James did not invite
It me to his house often, for 1 went without
an invitation. This is the production Of
d YOUR own imaginative brain, and is as
hollow as a stove-pipe. True, did chOI
wood and sew brooms; butt do not know
re that there is anything dishonorable il
/ aG,
George Washington chopped his father
= cherry tree.
(. Inever thought of BecIie speaking
good word for me. Though naturally 81,
and backward, yet, to your everlasting
surprise, be it known, l did my owl
counting, and consider it my own busi
y ness.
," The description of our visit to the Doc
tors, and our reception, is simply bul
Iesque, and no one knows it better tina
F'Fredrica.'
= The idea of borrowing MIlton's de
scription of the Devil to describe a ma
whose very manner is averse to anythin
with which his Satanic Majesty has to d.
. and who has been taught from infancy
: ''shun every appearance of evil,'' is,
least, very yunchristian-like.
49, In regard to his taking chew of toba
CO, and quoting much poetry, there is IL
a word of truth in it; nor is his poetry
be grinned at by owls.
= Lastly, do not write an article to
! published and held mp before the comm
nifty, to which 1 sign a fictitious nam
for honorable people generally have
good opionion of their own name as
le- have of 'FFredrica Merrick," )" whoever s
3 may be. SAM'L A. CROSBY
The people of Franklin county pa
tbraa Thousand dollars nrinCiDal u