Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1878-10-09

THE LIGHTNING ROD ray.


NTH his old gun crsmmed full OF shot
Was sitting BY his melon lot.
Three weeks he had hts vigil kent.
I Tasted no food or even slept
! i ct all the while the bad boys crept
Among his melons, where they ate
| Enough To XIII ten men, but fate
Decrccs mat small boys stuffed di-late.
This maddened farmer, nigh insane,
ahuS watched and prayed, but al In vain,
The boys preyed too-and none were slain
just Vt this awful time there trod
Up TO the farmer with nod,
An agent for lightning rod.
Good morning. sirr he sweetly spake,
| MY lightning rod you d better take;
They are the best; just let me make"
20 spare your rods" the farmer said.
And aimed tho gun straight at his head.
| lie shot the agent-not quite dead
| The bullets dattened at his feet;
| lie picked one mp, ana smiling sweet,
Presented 1t: he ne'ar was beat
Now. farmer !" said he, oh, SO sleek
just buy rod; then you may wreak
Your vengeance on the other cheek!"
oil city Derrick.
When man goes out of the poultry
business he tears the tattered hen-sipn
dOwn.-Bosion Post.
1t was before the "joker" was added
to the game of euchre that Attacks was
able to defy the lightning Whitehall
Times
Some of the Chinese Embassy wear
outside garments of white silk SO closely
resembling night-shirts as to make an
old maid dodge around the first corner
-Erchange.
On the body of man who was
struck by lightning last week four
autograph albums were found. Cut
this out, young woman, and paste it in
your own album.-Burlington Hamkese.
At St. Annc's Sunday school in Low
ell, Mass, IN answer to the question,
what is the greatest church festivals"
a little orphan of six years promptly re-
sponded, THE strawberry festival"
The Indians are really more capable
of civilization than we were disposed to
believe. They have taken to robbing
trains. The 6rst thing you know some
of them will start savings bank on the
Boston plan.-Burlington Hawkeye.
A man will brag. 1t may be of his
physical powers, his profound wisdom,
his morality. his depravity, or even his
sicknesses, violent cough, sore throat,
and all that sort of thing. Boston
Transcript.
This is perilous season for news
paper. II is liable to overlook the fact
that one of its constant readers took the
second prize for crook-neck squashes-
in which event it acquires bitter enc
my.-New Haven Register.
The time when pious editor is ex-
cusable for knocking splinters from the
third commandment is when he jabs
the wrong end Of his penholder in his
inkstand and hastily shoves it behind
his ear without wi2ing it off, Whitehall
Times.
A young lady, hesitating for word
in describing the character of rejected
sutton said: :" He is not a tyrant, not
exactly domineering, but" "Dog-
matte" suggested her friend. "No, he
has not dignity enough for that; 1 think
pupmatic would convey my meaning
admirably"
"What piece of work is man
How noble in reason! How infinite IN
faculties In form and moving, how
express and admirable. In acton, how
like an angel. In apprehension, how
like god !" And yet, some how or
other, he never looks that when he is
backed up to a peanut stand taking in
a tailpocket cargo of peanuts.-Hapk
eye.
The good man slammeth the gate and
bangeth the door, and maketh noise,
for his heart is without guile and he
feareth not the grievous words of his
wife; put the naughty man shutteth the
gate softly, and stealeth upstairs in his
stocking feet, and stumbleth over the
rockingham, and the last condition of
that man is worse than the first.-Er.
change.
"Gem'l en," said Brother Gardner of
the Lime Kiln Club, as the members
rose up, death mus come to all.
We can't escape it by jumpin' inter
Canady, and we can't buy it wild our
wealth. Some Of us will De hung,
some drowned, some burned up in
barns, some gifts shot 10y the police, but
it will be death JUS de same. Let us
hev our cabins in order, an let us be
'spectin' visit from dat white-faced
angel who moves so softly dat men hear
not, an who strikes so swiftly dat men
hev no cscape.-Detroit Free Press.
Alta recent trial of a liquor case the
witness OH the stand was under exami-
nation as to what he had seen in the de-
PENDANTS domicile, which he said he
had visited "a number of times. odd
you ever see any spirits there, or any
thing you regarded as spirits?" asked
the presiding Justice. "Why, yes-I