Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1878-01-30
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

1~'-NH'-
box.
Silver puts Stanley Matthews on
hirmettle.
Conkiing is ralking Hayes while
the sun shines.
1t is Nice for Offcnbach, who has
gone there to rest. 49,.
A political tramp is anxious to re.
montize bis pocket. .. ........
Jonah was perhaps the worst taken
in man that ever lived. .-.....
Poverty, laziness and pride make a
most unhappy mixture.
A St. Louis paper says Boston is
Chicago's mother-in-law. .,,,-.s
The aged bridegroom in New York
is Lord of all he surveys.
The new play. "The Savings Bank, "
is having a tremendous run.
Baked clay fenee-posts are in use
in Lehigh county, Pennsylvania.
New York Sun; as there a hell2"
Wait and see.--- Courier Journal.
The Labor Problem How to So
cure the largest pay for the least
work. i - 90 ~ &
Mr.. Pints has four beautiful daugh-
ters-justfa half gallon of sweet
lasses.
Charles Sumner has gone to a bet
ter world, and Grant has gone to
Egypt.
Deaf men soon learn to walk on
railroad tracks with the-utmost con-
fidence.
The wars Of a man are past finding
ont when the gout makes him stay
at home.
1t took the first woman one Eve
to dress, but it took her husband
Adam sight longer.
Garibaldi says TO Humbert T.:
"Bless you, my child; follow in the
footsteps Of your father
Over $s,O0O,O0O have thus far been
expended in the erection Of the New
York and Brooklyn bridge.
An advertising glove dealer, crowd
ing space, announces that he has "a
butt. and 6 butt. kids for 81"
1t was an apprentice to a merchant
tailor who sponged dollar green
back TO prevent further shrinkage.
The man who swore off is begin
ming to observe, with great feeling:
"We've but one life TO live, anyway"
A japanese traveller is puzzled to
know why the young men of this
country call their boat clubs colleges.
Ladies will soon have 70 lift their
hats when they sit down, if Fashion
is not changed in the other direc-
tion.
The young ladies have petitioned
Congress to pass an enabling act, to
enable the old folks to go to bed at
0 o'clock. 98 .f . .tis sH.-.
Forgery proof paper has been in
vented. Nothing is wanting now but
an invention to secure the payment
of real notes when due.
A dancing master announces that
on certain evening he will give a
grand hop. He probably wants every
body to come and see him do it.
1t is reported that Miss Human has
been offered 1000 a week. That is
too much to pay any Human being
for opera singing in this country.
Credit is system by which man
can spend his money before he gets
it. 1t is greatly employed by people
who expect to have money which
never comes.
The Prince Of Wales titles are
rounded up with "Citizen and Mercer
and Grocer and Fishmonger and
Goldsmith and Merchant Tailor and
Clothworker."
Miss Thompson, the foolish Ameri-
can woman in England, is so i'm
pressed with the benefits of hard
money that she has put her horse on
gold footing 3-to
Changes come with the seasons.
Ihe man VINO last year lald In bed
while his wife built the fire will this
year let his wife build the fire whilo
he lies in bed.
The first book printed on this con-
tinent was by Crombcrger, in Mexico,
l544. The first book in our own
country was the Bay Psalm Book, in
Ie4o, at Cambridge, by Stephen