, 1878-02-23
Strangers in Town.

upon the stranger who Is III tohh, says III
New York June Journal. 1t is contrary L
the usages of most polite nations, but W
long ago adopted it and present society ap
proves of it. 1t has its pleasant and Its IN
pleasant aspects, but the more satisfaetor,
ones predominate. When a circle Is Iarg
enough and agreeable enough, combining
such varieties of people as make it enter
tanning, stranger who is sensitive and con-
siderate, feels unwilling to intrude upon i
without an invitation. To thrust ones sci
among people who feel no social needs, re
9uires an amount of sek-approbation that Il
not possessed by the really admirable char
acter On the other hand, 1t Is exceedingly
unfortunate for the stranger who must wal
outside the gates of society until some ont
shall think Of him and find time and inelina
ton to go out of pleasant circle and invite
the lonely individual into its charmed pre-
| cinctS.
But then who of us is there who would
not rather wait and be sought than to bt
considered an eager intruder, Time may
seem TO move too slowly to the impatient
lover of society, but still it does not stand
| still, and recognition comes eventually II the
stranger possesses sattractivequalities OF mind,
manner and character.
If the stranger brings letters of mtroduc'
tion, All cnfJce to society is easy through the
usually observed forms, which will be fully
treated IN another chapter. II strangers
who have come to reside with us, or even tO
visit our locality, bear credentials OF reSpecta-
bility, courteous and hospitable residents
will call upon them, after sufficient time has
| elapsed for the recently arrived to have ad-
iuSted themselves to their new positions.
| No introduction IS necessary IN such case.
| The resident ladies' call between two and five
| o'clock, send IN thep own with their nus
bands, or their fathers or brothers cards,
and if they find the strangers disengaged, a
brief and cordial interview ends the first visit.
This mast be returned within 4 week, or a
note of apology and explanation is sent, and
| the return visit is then paid later Oh. 1t a
card be sent in return for this visit. or is lett
| in person without an effort to see the parties
who have made the first visit, it Is under
stood that the strangers prefer solitude, OF
that there are reasons why they caunOt re-
ceive visitors The one who has offered the
welcoming hand of kindliness viii have full
| filled social duty, and there is no reason for
reSrettIng the attempt to entertain even the
stranger. 1t is more than possible that some
! unhappy circumstance compels this reserve.
! At any rate, it is far better to look for some
| sweet spring rs the source of all incompre-
! hensible conduct than it is to imagine an un-
| pleasant or bitter one.
A gentleman cannot make first cali on
the ladies of the family of new conner with
out an introduction or an invitation. His
| l.1t ,Ic
and he may receive an invitation, verbal OF
written, to make the new acquaintance.
Under such circumstances the usual formal
; ity of introduction may be made by his Sec
ond visiting-card, which he will send in to
I! announce himself at the time of his call,
; provided he pays his respects to the new
household unacoompaaied by mutual friend.
| The sending of his card to the strangers
was al uamistakable request to make their
. acquaintance. Ii his visits be undesirable,
| the way is open for an easy method OF de
ciiniag them. Ills card need not be noticed
This refusal of friendlineSs is far less awk.
ward and unpleasant for both parties than to
ask permission verbally to become a visitor,
and be verbally rejected. Sometimes there
are unfortunate family complications or con-
ditions which compel refusal Of gentle
/ men society, but which are unexplainable.
! Painful necessities are oftenest the very ones
least easy of explanation. No gentleman
! possesses a reasonable ground for offence, OF
for feeling hurt If he be not admitted as a
visitor to a family whose circumstances and
conditions are unfamiliar to him. 1t is not
difficult to imagine that the stranger who
refuses to make new friend is likely t.
| Sptf hon, 4ha
stranger can make no overtures for ae
qualntance to older residents, but as frequent
~ happens IN large towns, two people may
have desired each others acquaintance for I
long time, bat the formali.ies Of an intro
ductlon have been beyond easy reach. Oh
| their names even may have been unknown Il
each other. They meet at a house OF Z
trlend, and conversation, either with or with
out presentation, often leads to wish fol
further intercourse. This desire is expressed
and mutual interchange of kindly interest
and addresses takes place. The question
then arises, who shall pay the first visit
This Is one of those matters which settle
themselves. Mutual liking and sincere ex
pressions OF regard prepare the way for either
one TO make the initiative call. If one lady
be the yonngor by many years, she should
call first. This etiquette is based upon til,
supposition that the elder lady belongs to :
larger circle of friends, and has more press
ing social duties than the younger one. L
the parties are equal in age and position tn,
one whose receiving day arrives earliest
should receive the first call
Ii their ''at home" hours arc 1T the same
time, mutual arrangement, or the urgency
OF their admiration for each other Will settl:
this easily enough without formality.
An aged gentleman or lady, an eminent
parsonage or clergyman, always receive:
the first call 1t is proper to leave care
for them, even when they are known to bt
too much engaged either to receive in persor
to return calls of ceremony. The card sig
mites respectful and appreciative remem
brance.
No custom is more significant of the high
est and noblest breeding and the gentles;
culture than that of remembering the aged
IN all social formalities. Our citizens are
accused by other nations of Indifference t.
those who are advanced In years. This may
be true of selfish people and of plebeians
but it is not true of our refined and high
toned members of society. thoughtful
courtesy and tender consideration make:
the late afternoon of life beautiful with re
spectful regard, even when a lack of familiar
acquaintance has withheld affectionate de
votion.
A FARMER, having been terribly annoy
ed by drummers, put up sign, No sew
ing machines wanted here got one" II
was no use. The next drummer wanted
to see the machine, "and perhaps he'd