The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1878-12-13
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Arssa. Iwsslaiss WAS stae wssfa "eMs
isse matr snaaeonssfnssl than in III
snssanee n clergyman HI ls~nrashafs
WIZ rsss ~hnie~rns warning in fsTsfa
H. lsai,at articulation ls discovering In
une hra~e ~hsrh W. visited. The .las ais..a
rsearhsns frnm Luke Mn, n, thai ihe
sefsans hai puns hums with sir im1r-s
sioa that his s.st hal i#en, 4 i.safs,sl
ihes. l,ssnusr shan nst an nWsf.s' man
A Hampshire incumbent rsseenli, w..
ported iii the laal Natl ssassffe sanas II
the hlan,iss~ h~ hal heard male in ihe
marriage revs,ee III that vlass II persons
who have H. pick mp thr words ~ l,oss
they can frnm hrartnr them repeatedly
others. He sail that In his ovn parisll
il wHs quite Tho fashion fer the man.
when giving tie ring. IL say n the
voriaa. with my bndy thee wash mp,
and with all my hurdle gou,ls thee ana
thou.- llc said the ~nmen wufe g.n.
orally better up in this part III the S,rs.
ice ihan thr men. TN. day, however. Il
bride startled him hy promising. In wla.
she supposed to he tlr language II the
pmycr.hnok, III take her husband, to
ave and III Did frcm this day far,nit
for bcttcrer horse. for richercf pnscr. in
siggrrncss health. 10 lnse cherries and
10 hay" What meaning this estraorli-
nary VOW conveyed to her own mimi the
incumbent said IL haillcd him tn con.
lecture.
The stories told of the blnnicrs made
by Oxford and Cambridge undergrad.
uatcs in the scripture examination nre
almost incredible. One NJ these, when
asked who was the first King Of Israel.
was Nd fortunate AZ to stumble upon the
name of Saul" He saw that he had
hit tho mark, and, wishing to show the
examiners how intimate his knowledge
of tho scriptures was, added. conildrn-
TALLY, Saul. also called Paul" An.
other wns asked 10 give tho parable of
the good Samaritan. He did M with
tolcrahlc accuracy till hc came to the
place where tile Samaritan says to the
inn.kccpcr: When come again | will
repay thee" Here the nnlncky exam.
incc added: This hc said. knowing
TINT he should see his face no more"
A lndicrons story II told " hailie
whose studies In natural history seem
to have been rather limited. The fol-
lowing case came before him one day !:
A man who kept d ferret, having 10 90
into the country. left the cagc with the fer
rot IN charge of ncirhhor till hc should
return. Tho ncighbor incantiously
opened the cage door, anl the ferret
escaped. Tho owner wns very angry,
and brought claim against his neigh
hor for damages. The following WINS
the decision ~ the learned hailie "Nae
,loot.' he said to the mnn who had been
left In charge. yc wns wrnng 10 open
the cagc door; hut" hc added, turning
10 tho other, ye wns wrang too. For
why did yc no clip the hrntc's wingS?
composition ln,licrons blunders nrc
sometimes made. A Wisconsin paper
announced tim. the Board of Education
lad resolved 10 erect building large
enough IL accommodate 600 students
three stories high" In nh English
papcr MI advertisement appeared, under
the heading of ITO Let" of n house
for n family in good repair fnnel,
Noted this, and onjcctnrcd TINT N fam.
ily IN good repair must mean one In
which none II the members were
cracked. The brooches would have
been scnt before, but have been unwcll.
was a note of apology sent t. Dean Al
ford hy his jcwelcr. and Tive sister,
want washing was mn advertisement
which appeared In the Manchester
! Guardian.
An amusing style Of hlnnder In Iii.
"hnll." for which the Irish get mos
credit. II was mn Irish editor that *
claimed, when speaking Of the wrong'
of his country. Her cup of misery ha'
hccn ovcriiowing. and il not yet full !!
II was mn Irish newspaper that said Q
Rohespierrc Tint "hc left no children
behind. except brother, who wins kille.
nj tho samc timc.' Irish also WAS iii,
| Cornet who, when writing home from
India praising tho mnch.abuscd climat.
~ really ono III the best under tho sun
added: "But q lot of young fellow
come ont here, md they drink and the,
cut. md they cat and they drink, ans
they die. and then they write home i
their friends, saying Il was the elimat'
TINT did II! i"
Though not 40 numerous m those O
tho Emerald isle, Scotland II not with
ont its specimens OF tins kind of blum
der. Two operatives in one of tho bor
der towns were heard dispnting about
new cemetery, beside the elegant rail
ing of which they were standing. On
of them, evidently disliking the cont
mental fashion In which II WINS bcinI
laid out, said. in disgust Id rathe
dec than bc buried in NC place.
"Wccl, itk the vcrrn reverse vi mo.
said the other; for I'll l,c buried nAn
where else. II I'm spared
4 clcrgymAnf walking ono day In III
country. fell into thought. lie was .
accustomed To ride that when he foun,
himself ut 4 toll he stopped and shout
"a 10 tho man, Here! what's To pay 7
Pay for WHAT asked the man. Fo
my horse, said tho Clergyman. Win
horseg There's no horse. sir lslcr
me! !" exclaimed the clergyman, lookin
down between his legs, !" ! thought ! WI
on horseback"
Sydney Smith was not IN general al
sent minded Int he says TINT onc'
when calling on friend IN l4ondol
aud hring asked by tho servant, WI
shall I NY has calIcdY" he could III
for tho lifc of him rccoilcct his ow
name, and stared IN blank confusion
tho man fcr some time before II can
buck 10 him.
! Tho first Lorl Lyttlctnn was very NJ
sent. II Ii declared III him that whs
he foil into the river by the upsettiu
! of boat 1T Hnglcy. = he sank twice b
fore he rccoflcctcd that he con