The Findlay Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Hancock County, Ohio) 1870-1881, 1878-07-19
Selert Story.
HIRAM JENKENS' MISTAKE.

Hiram Jenkins drove slowly up the
hill road that leads to Deacon Bates. 1t
was plain even to the causual observer
that the errand he was bound upon was
one of no common importance. No man
could have arranged himself SO gor-
geonsly simply for the purchase of a tub
of fall butter or yoke of steers. His
hair was in a state of distressing smooth
ness. and seemed almost part of the
glossy hat which covered it. His coat
and pantaloons were marvels in their
way, and his boots, which had been elab
orately BACKED, reflected back the rays
of the setting sun in manner perfectly
binding to the beholder. And yet, not
withstanding his superiority in all these
respects to the lilies OF the field, there
was apparent in his actions a singular
sort of nervousness, 4 trepldation almost
which rendered his appearance at once
ridiculous and awkward. This trepida-
ton was in no wise lessened by the sud
den vision of an urchin watching him
from the barn door, and who, as the
team approached, with a widening grin,
sped off in the direction of the farm
hruse, and disappeared through the
kitchen door. Hiram was conscious a
minute afterwards of being the target for
half a dozen pairs ofeyes from the sitting
room windows and it required extraor-
dlnary strength Of mind OIL his part 10
drive past the house to the shed where
the horses of all visitors were hitched.
There are few more awkward things 10
do than to get out of carriage when
women are watching, and though Hiram
had probably never thought of the fact
before fully experiencing the truth, as
endeavoring tospring genteelly from the
buggy his feet slipped on the wheel, and
he came down on his hands and knees
in the dirt. His remarks as he scram-
bled 10 his feet were confined to one
word, but that though short, was the
most expressive one in the English Ian
guage.
"I'll have TO so around to the barn and
wash my hands before go in," he said
10 himself Il suppose they are having
their fun out of me in the house now.
Confound it. / wish had not started"
As he passed the door of the horse
barn, which was partly opened, he heard
The sound of voices. He listened, and
his heart sank as he recognized the voice
of his rival, Elnathan Rogers
Il want her bad" he was saying. "She
just suits me. You can always have her
ycu know, and you'd better call the thing
settled
"I don't know about that" answered
the deacon donbtfully. al have always
said, come what would, / wouldn't part
with Jenny, But you lrarg on SO, don't
know"
Say its bargain. deacon. I've
thought it over a good while, and Jenny
| must have. I'll treat her well, you may
be sure of that"
The deacon hesitated, blew his nose,
and finally said:
"She's got some little tricks that no
body knows anything about but me, and
1 don't want to impose upon aneighbor." "
"Oh, pshawl that's only an excuse,
deacon. I'm willing 10 risk it"
"She kicked me in the stomach last
winter, and bit little Sammy not more
than six weeks ago can show You the
scar now"
Great king" thought Hiram. But
here l was going to pop the question this
very night. Who would have ever
thought it?"
"Ill take that out of her." said EIna
than, continuing the conversation. "If
she so much as lifts foot against me, I'll
give her a lickin' that will last her a
month
Lick" calculated Hiram to himself
astonished beyond measure. Lick Jen-
ny Bates Well this goes ahead of any
thing ever heard of; And the old man
doesn't say word What next?7
A pause ensued, which was at last
broken by the deacon.
"Well, if you must have her you must
L expect the old ladyn want something
to say about it. she thinks as much oI
Jenny as l do. Won't you come into
the house?"
@Not now. I've got to go down to the
village before dark. III be round some
time Tomorrow
Hiram Jenkins waited until he saw
his successful rival climb the fence be-
tween the two farms. Then he delib
erately unhitched his horse, got into the
wagon and drove of, never casting a
look toward the window where the fair
Jenny sat in watchful expectation. Not
until he reached his own door did he
draw long breath.
! Il seems like a dream" said he, slowly
unbuckling the harness. @To think O