West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1878-01-19
EVERY DAY sPICERIES.

IoNKERs Gdsctto; Praying liz very
on-knoesy thing TO some people.
PuLADELPHIA BUiietin, Are Bap-
lists moro liable 10 diptheory than other
peopleY
on Cry Derrick, A navigator's
most dangerous strait is whisky
straight.
NEW ORLEANS Picdyune: Silence il
not always golden. The oyster is con-
tinually getting into broils and stews.
PHILADELPHIA Bulletin: If beggar
stops you on Christmas day tell him you
are cent-nickel.less, and he will so away.
COMMERCIAL Bulletin; We hear
great deal about the cigar strikers in
New York, but IL is pretty hard to strike
good cigar in Boston.
NEW York Comic AdUertiser: The
compositor who set up $50, 900" TO read
"Sl, 900" might have prevented his mis-
take by little fourth ought.
TICKLE the public and mako II gTini
The more you tickle, the more you'll winl
Hut teach the puhlic--you'll never grow rich,
But live like beggcr and die In ditch
--Beigrdvid.
FULTON Times: If the short man
ever feels overcome with nm intense de-
sire to be tall, il is when he finds him
self on the outside of crowd mt a dog
fight.
WoRCEsrER Pres! The Cherokee ma
ton has debt of $3.50 and has
$500 GO in the treasury, ,andyet some folks
assert that it is impossible to civilize
the Indians.
BBID0EPoRT Standard: Pleasure is
manifested in different ways, but we be-
lievc nobody ever heard man sing
when he had dropped scuttle Of ashes
on the hack stairs
NoRRIsrowN Herald. The New York
Herald speaks of The Sugar Battle"
Rather n sweet fight we should say but
a man Is likely 10 come out of such u
battle with n sorghum.
DANBuRY Netrs. Dr. Mary Walker
was telephoned to the other day with
the question, " Can you cure an eye can
cerW and in moment back came the
prompt echo, can, sir"
NEW York Commercial Adpcrfiscr:
America now supplies Europe with beef,
-four, apples, potatoes, butter, cheese.
Who says she may not claim the proud
title of " the Fodder.land%
YoNKERs Gazette: IL may not be
amiss 20 say that the YOnkers man of
whom we last week said that he " wears
q beard on one side Of his face, sports n
beard OH the other side also.
New York Graphic: The London
Punch seriously rhymes "philosophers'
as bad as the Sweet Singers rhymeof
"grasshoppeF with "candlosticks."
ARGUS Union The Chicago 7riJuns
says: zone touch Of nature makes the
nations kin" Yes, in Europe one touch
of nature Is making two nations skin
each other with all reasonable dispatch.
NEW YoRK Comic Adrcrfisers A Lon
don confectioner has, for twenty Christ
mas seasons past, given away hundred
pounds Of candy to the poor. II any
man deserves an epi-tafiy certainly does.
THE DREAM or ST. THEREsA.
Have you heard oi the dream she had
Theresa the saintyf
Come, listen, ye good nnd tadi
And heed u not iainiy.
weird, awful woman she saw
Aud wondered what brought her.
Ia one hand she bore flaming EtrsW,
In the other hand water.
"where bound ?" asked There's. 60 teliH
The answer was given.
"Thoresa, go % qucnch he'll,
| And then to burn heaven"
But Why" asked tho saint, q" do you make
/ so wild an cndeav0r7n
go that mon, ior Ills own holy sats.
May love God forever" -LfPpineoff
ROME Sentinel: "When a girl gets
mad and rises from n fellows knee"
says an exchange, "but thinks better Of
10 and goes back again that's what they
call a relapse" And here we have been
working for dear life 10 keep OF a relapse
under the impression that 10 was some
way related 20 cholera mOrbus.