Claiborne guardian. [volume] (Homer, La.) 1877-188?, 1878-06-05
The Trouble Of Burning a Hash Mill.
(Cincinnati Commercially

about hashl7 When we make
hash we don't, of course, use fresh
meat. Hash is not made in that
way. IL it were made of anything
except the scraps that are left, il
wouldn't he nash. BESIDES, if scraps
were not used, bolrdcrs wouldn't be.
lieve it anyhow. That is the logic
of hash. To the scraps hash owes
its variety, the spice OF hash. | am
speaking freely Of these things. you
see, for l want to make Il fair state.
mcnt, Notwithstanding the fact OF our
being SO grossly misreprescntcd.
But | don't know that you care to
have me go OH further with our bill
OF fare. We edeavor, 50 far as we
are able, to do the clean thing with
our boadcrs. How that mouse hap.
pened to be cooked in tho chicken
pie that they made such q fuss about,
I'm sure ] don't know. / gave my
wife good scolding for it, and said
she ought to have been more careful
and taken the mouse out before she
set the pie OH the table for decent
people to eat, but it did no good
then, you see.
So it was with the cat tracks on
the'pumpkin pie. We couldn't help
it. You see the pie was brought out
and set OH the supper table, and was
not noticed, though the cat tracks
were plain enough to be seen when
that old maid of q boarder pointed
them ont Immediately after the min
lister, who was visiting us, had said
grace That, however, was not the
worst of it. You see the minister
and his wife and professor came to
see lis and take supper, and we were
putting on our best ticks. Tho cat
track business was 4 sort Of dam
per, to be sure; but we we're trying
to make up for that, and paid little
attention to the demonstration the
hack-driver tried to get up on &C
count of finding bug in his biscuit,
for in the hurry of putting up meals
such things may happen. 1t was y
little Embarrassing, it is true, to have
that hack driver and the coalbarge
captain enter into warm debate as
to whether the bug was of the bed or
potato species, but they both showed
their ignorance of natural history,
aud only made fools of them
selves.
This is what caused me the trou.
BILE. The brakeman and the canal
boat pilot had n quarrel that day
at dinner, which | noticed tho old
maid was anxious to have renewed.
The minister was speaking of tho
moral aspects of the temperance
crusade, and the Professor was dis.
cussing with me the topic of the
transit of Venus. when the old maid
observed to Jim, the brakeman,
that Buck, the pilot, had said in
her presence that he had mind to
bust Jim's smcller. The minister
insisted that it was great aud Clio.
rious cause, the Professor declared
that the astronomical observations
to be made would startle a scientific
world, and Jim remarked that he
could mash any canal snoozcr that
ever straddlcd rudder. The min
lister continued: "This noble work
of reformation'-the Professor add.
ed: sin the whole range of tele-
scopic vision--and Buck handed
Jim n teacup in the eye; Jim respon.
dcd with the bread plate. and Buck
replied with the water pitcher. Then
they reached across the table, felt
for each other and Embraced. l new
or felt so mortified in my life. As
they were at it in the corner, ouI
late peaceful board on top OF them
with its legs in the air, declared
was sorry this thing had ever hap
pcncd, aud just at that particular
time with the company present
At the moment ! had not figured NJ
my loss, which was forty nine dollars
without insurance. Added to thi:
was the loss. of three of my boarders
who went out next morning to look
out for "a nice private boarding
place in quiet family and in theil
hurry to leave they forgot to square
up with me.