Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-05-04
THE LIVERY OF WOE.
Some of the Absurdftfes of ssMOurn.
ingc Dresses.


AL others bound The most to be convent H.
that What Is held to be the most sacred of emo
tions should be compelled TO obtrud, itself pa
all behoders and to trick Itself out for the
common gaze duly intense to the regulation
pattern. Sorrow for the dead must be sorrow
by the yard req cts have their measure in tue
width OF a hatDand and the depth of tuck.
Other gIiefs are taught to go patient and oD
scure, but this fiauntS itself in uniform puts
on, as il We're, label, "Genuiue grief, very
decOrOus' makes it's outward garbi,S adver-
tisement. And the display is avow Idly aud
absolutely under the rules of fashion and Ell
quette; IL has no spontaneous symbolism, no
meaning of its own at all. 1t simply says:
Look at me this is how sorry my respectable
ity requires me to be in the present state and
by.and-by; Look at me: my responsibility re-
quires ME 10 be so far cOnSO,ed at this period
Of my grief:' and society accepts the clothes
as formal certificate, and it is understood
that, whether there be actu ii sorrow or no.
there is no hypocrisy since the respecta bility
not the sorrow is what the clothes really indi
cate. The milliner's scales vary some wha.,
but each has her
DEFINITE SCALE OF LAMENTATION
in trimmings, and the widow and the orphan
costume their grief by her diction. Atterif
any lady. having to show the world tina she has
suffered bereavement and is correctly al
fected by II, miStruS $ the mlner'S or the
mOurnlngsaleSman'Sa authority, there are mau-
uals on the etiquette of mourning to instruct
her mlnutely, to button OF friil, how to eX
the degree OF relationship. and, to day, exact
ly how long to 60 on expressing it. There is
no fOrmalty with so lit IL feigning in it as the
wearing of mourning; for its matter-of- form
nature is not merely confessed. but made its
chlef claim to polite admiration.
There is little to be said in blame of the un-
trnthfulness OF mourning. Every courtesy
whether to the living or the dead, which soce
ty adopts as duty, becomes of necessity from
matter OF prescription, frequently matter
OF pretence. Your black at-band to the mem
DRY OF the kinsman YOU feel unable to regret
from want OF Knowing him. or from knowing
him too well, is no more deceitful than your
white favor, sign of rejoicing, at wedding
which need never have taken place, for any
thing you care.
BUT THAT THE CUSTOM OF WEARING MOURN
ING
is harmless Is by no means incOntrOvertible
1t IS not one which the fashionable and the
wealthy can assign to themselves and leave the
humble their freedom if they choose to take it.
II the duchess likes to hobble herself inside
''pulled-back' skirts and impart Chinese ele-
gance to her impeded steps. we need not waste
sympathy on the washerw0man who follows
SUIT: nothing worthy sympathy in her impes
her to the imitation. But, if fashion and re-
spectability combine to establish the rule that
not TO wear some particular kind or color of
dress IS to do dishOnor to the m omDry of our
dead, the poorest draggletailS are coerced by
all they have of tender feelings and al, they
have left of self-respect to wear the livery Of
Woe-at what cost God knows and often the
devll knows too: And with the victims of that
coercion we ought to sympatiZe. And the very
tribute OF decency toward the dead is where
poverty comes In, source of hideouS, though
Hhmeant. lrreverence to the dying The new
dress becomes neeifu past waiting for there
VIII TOO probably be mourning to wear soon, so
the new dress is chosen to serve for MOURNING
and the black for the funeral hangs in cup
Sunday church and peaSuring before his ewes
How else. when
MONEY FOR NEW DRESSES
Is so hard to come by, and respect for him and
the neighbOrS will require good black! Ii one
may judge by the advertisements of a we'll
known mourning dealers firm, this thoughtful
provision OF mourning beforehand is not I'M
known IN families capable of paying high
prices; for ladies are informed with bland ite-
ration in pretty well every newspaper they
can lay hands on how, in cases of sudden and
tendance to their dreSSmakng necessities can
be afforded them by this energetic frm-the
inevitable inference from the wording Of the
advertisements being that, where the need for
mourning is not sudden and unexpec ted the
proper clothes will have been laid in at leisure
beforehand. If this be the case, there must be
an 3dd conflict OF feelings at times in the
minds OF expecting and prOvident mOurnerS-
on the one hand, the wish that the beloved rel
alive should recover; on the other the sense
lhat, II ne really cannot recover, it will be very
awkard ii he survives long enough for the
mourning dresses to get of fashion before they
can appropriately be taken into wear: and if
modest black serge, or some such not too an
guishful stuff for double duty, should get taken
into wear before the bereavement, it must re-
qulre considerable extra resignation to have
at once to watch it growing sha bby and the
MOURNING IS VERY EXPENSIVE.
Men, in their ignorance, aware that their
female relations often wear some sort of black
garment and call it economical. suppose that
black, under the name of mourning NAV east
~ be cheap and Serviceable costume if will
1ul or weak extravaganza has nothing to say
whether and why there is difference financi-
ally between liberal use of black i'm ordinary
attire and the purchase and keeping up of a
head to heel black outfit in mourning materials
consult n r. paG 10 Of
accounts who has ever arrayed herself in Or
thOdoX garb of grief. But, suppOSing that
women's mourning We're not in itself more ex-
penslve than any ordinary dress Of ordinary
women, that ven 1t were less expensive, and
that all mourning in hOusehOld-the mems,
the chlldrens, the servants, tOO-were less ex-
is 1t when all at once everybody in the house
hold must have new outfit, regardless of the
condition OF the present wardrobe? With
out speaking o., Of the homes in which aetna!
poverty prevails, there are but minority of
homes in which the death of the husband or
father does not make an immediate fall of in
come; in many eases the fall is from ease to
Penury. Perhaps the house has to be given up,
the sons must be put to cheaper schools, and
bred to humber professions, the grOWn-up
daughters must 60 out as governesses ana
education, and thrive as they may on stinted
meals-but out Of the scanty funds. mourning
outfits must be purchased: everv considera-
ton must give way to that.
Where the grief represented by mourning is
deep and real, mourning is frequently pecu-
liarly cruel infiiction. We have to cI0the our
selves in a symbolism which symbolizes moth
ing but the undertaken; we may not put on so
much as glove or neckie, but it is to speak
of the funeral gloom. 1t is thus that the dead
get forgotten; from the day they depart we
force their deathS-nOt their lives-on our
minds, and the thought is too painful, and We
are glad when we can turn from it. 1t is a
memory to put by with the black clothes; and
it kills the brighter one that surely is the one
we should all wish to be mOurned by
TO WOMEN OF UNREASONABLE TEMPERA-
MENT,
to those especially with the artistic suceptib
ity to the influences of color and light-a sus-
ceptibility which belongs to the very many
women who have no artistic genius belongs
perhaps, to the majority of wOmen-the lugu-
briOus surroundings of their own clothes is an
aggravatiOn Of mental pain which they should
be forbidden for health and sanity's sake; and
to any woman who needs the power of fixing
her attention on other things than her mis-
fortunes the reminder forever in her sight is a
practical mischief. Mems mourning, if not
more reasonable, is less hurtful, because less
Obtrusive. Most men are habitlalIy unaware
OF the pattern and color of the suit they al
inside; but wOman's dressis at it's skimpi
too vOluminOus to escape her notice; and it
is not WOmanS nature not to see her Dress
AS for the reductto Gd dbsurdum of msurn-
ing, alf-mourning, the announcement to the
world by an admixture of grays and lavenders
that Won begin tn feel rpSipna6 and homo coon