Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1878-10-02

olX IL Onths. ~
Ihree monlhs. '..''..'' w
The Detroit FREQ Press tells of q sad catastro.
phc in connection with contribution boxes. We
have often observed that when man intends
to dcposit largo sized silver piecc no is apt to
hold it openly between hsthumb and finger go
that every one may see it, and to drop 1t from
O convenient elevation into the box that Its
jDelo may be heard far and wide. When, on
tho contrary, he intends to give only penny,
he keeps it in tho palm OF bis hand, closing
his fingers about it very tightly, that ne may
tho better follow tho Scripture Injunction and
gives. And when ho puts the coin with which
he so reluctantly parts into tho box he does not
drop it from height as the man with the half
dollar does, but quietly inserts his whole list
into the bcy, and 80 atcalthiIy opens his iugers
and withdraws them that you really can't tell
whether be has put s)mething in or taken
something out. That is tho way in which the
churches are supported by a generous public
Bus to our story. At q meeting OF some oo'
ored brethren it was decided to take up COL
lection. The president concluded to pass the
hat himself aud 10 order to encourage the
| others he put in Q ten cent piece. at the END
| of tho ceremony. during which every hand had
| been in the hat. the president approached the
tablo, turned tho hat upside down and not
| even bis own contribution dropped out. lilo
opcned his eyes with hastonishment and exclam'
| cd, 10 dc Lord bu. I'zc eben loss dc ten
cents started wid u Then was there con
stcrnation on the faces of the multitude. Who
was the lucky man that was the question. lie
| cnu!d not bush or turn pale. Tor all were, as
black as night. 1t was evidently hopeless
case, aud was summed up by ono brother. who
rosa in his place and said, so!cmnIy, Oar
pears to be great moral lesson roun' heah
sOmewhar.
PARIsIAN PIcKINGs. The defendant, hav'
ing been proved guilty Of the ofense OF calling
tho complainant opprobrous nGmos, as "thiet,
"robbcr," tEc, is duly tined. He pays his fine
and asks tho judge
"Your honor, there is, understand, law
against calling an honest man thief; does the
law forbid q man 10 call thief an honest
man?"
"Of course not" replies tho magistrate.
"rhcp, sir, says the defendant, turning to
his prosecutor, with triumphant air, you
ere the most honest man havo over met.
Joanncttc-Ma, arc you going to give me
another piece OF pic?
Ma-What do you want to know torl
Jeannette--Because if you amt want to
cat this piece slowly.
Il dauceress celebrated Of the can can, on
rcturn from the garden Mabillo, meets one Of
her female companions.
well, are you satisfied? Was thorc good
attendance tonight p
"Oh, do not speak to me thereof, my DEAR,
replies the artist: Il am altogether disgustcd.
Imagine you that the place was literally jam
med with economical clergymen.
Tho good DR.. x, visiting an actress patient,
surprises her fifteen year old daughter so To-
tonty absorbed 10 her book that she docs not
notice his presence.
"My pretty child. says lie. what isty you
read, romanc1 or fairy fable, that you arc so
deeply lutcrc-trd ia il -
"NolhiuG," says tho dear girl; ''oply tho
book you SAID mamma wasn't to read.