Daily press and Dakotaian. [volume] (Yankton, Dakota Territory [S.D.]) 1875-1880, 1878-11-13
Che Daily 1ress aud gatstaias
DAKOTA
Wednesday Evening, Nov. -, 1873
CHOICE NONSENSE.

-
The parsgrapher who heard Demoths's
nose may have heard Menji-koH.-EdesAu,g
Herald.
Joseph johnson, of Essex, raised an apple
Weighing q OUNCES. He will moi lecture
Bailey.
Grangers don't like minstrel performances
because they have middle men.-Logan
(Ohio) Gazette.
In the race for the Arlic stakes Symmes
has the 'pole."-@. Sam Gaines, from he
Judges stand.
"Into the chaws of DEATH" said the man
Who fell among the teeth Of a buzz saw
keokuk Constitution.
Here, come. hold US down! IL not q de.
tective in the United States coinage bureau
a mint's SPY ?-Erratic Enrique.
Montague appears to have been On actor
With considcra lie genius and twentv.nine
pairs Of panialoors.- Un5seing En-.
lfempty vessels make the most noise,
there is storage room in most modern politi.
cisns.- Cincinnati Breakfast Table. =
Titus took Jerusalem A. D. 20, but who
10 the thunder took our umbrella Septem-
Der q, Wheeling Sunday Leader.
1t is the season of fairs, and there is a
young mai in town who holds one every
Saturday nisht-Fond du Lac Reporter.
It is always the last saloon open on the
belated citizens road home at night that
gives him an extra nick in his walk -Neu-
ark Call.
A good many newspapers around the
country would do we'll to bear in mind that
"a fair exchange is no robberry."-Rome
Sentinel.
Edison and the gas companies appear 10
be of one mind and purpose. Both are try
ing TO max. light Of Observation-Disclosures
Advocate.
1t is said that Croesus never published a
newspaper; if he had it would never have
had q tendency to in Croesus wcalth.-Brad
ford Breeze.
The rich widow, who inherited her prop
erty from her husband, attended his funeral
in a real estate conveyance.-Erratic Enri-
que.
A paper of tobacco will 60 a long way II
sent by nail. -Hachensack Republican.
Not 40 long if males scent it.--HevnNds.
ollie Herald.
BY an lnexplicable evolution youthful
prodigies either develop into pitisble para.
graphers or passable pedeRoguee.-Erratic
Enrique.
Where will l find WORRY" inquired q
tramp Of a schoo!-master. 10 the diction.
ary." was the erudite reply.-HdckensacA
Republican.
Now another man has been saved from
dro wing BY Ida Lewis. If Ida Levi.
were with me every time I 20 10 swimming
how safe I should feel.-Lukens.
A Rockland man, who gets a pair of
square shoulders from his tailor, came yery
near being indicted by the grand ju,v for
false .wearing.-RockAand Courier.
Too much economy killeth q great na.
ton. He who maketh one D collar do
now where two used to be euflcien; knock.
eth trade Whitehall Times.
Boston street car conductors have a bell
punch that bells but does not punch. There
is no use denying it. Boston does beat the
world for intel ct N. y. Nal.
When a Nebraska man calls another q
liar there is no duel over it The liar .ulps
1t down AMI waits his chance to shoot, the
other mans hogs Detroit Free Press.
The Cincinnati: Saturday Night has dis
covered IN I an "ex detective is Shout, to
issue a volume ot llis X. hes" Probably
they Will be bound in puE lt-.T y. GraDhir,
TIE Sun says thai Mr.. Wbitclaw Reid
of IN" Tribune. blows his nose with his
fingers in the public ST e,t.. With whose
fingers should he blow his nose ia the pub.
lie streets ?-Iuck
Mr.. Eison has applied for a pa,en, on a
new kind Of sore thumb that will no, stick
out forty ways for Sunday. He saws i, il
toand to re%vnlutionize the sore thumb pu-
siness.-OR City Derrick.