The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1878-12-19

Papa" said the five year-o daugh-
ter of West-side minister, ais the devil
an authorp "WelI," replied the amused
clergyman, 81 should say he was-the au-
thor of n good deal of mischief, any
way" "Not that, don't mean," pur-
sued the little one, "but does he write
books?" "Not that ever heard of; at
least, not personally" was the reply
"but why do you ask ?" 80, nothing /;
only heard you say something to mann
ma about the works of the devil"
= He came from the country, seven
years ago. aud is nov we'll. to do ;slert
chant. Last week he wrote TO the old
folks, telling them he had married a
lady with n very fine voice-mezso-
soprano of very extraordinary compass.
He received M answer from the maternal
side of the houae informing him that his
lnmented aunt was afflicted with some.
thing like TINT, and had found relief in
placing mustard plaster on the sole of
each foot and drinking pint of dan
delion tea.
= In Chicago the cre Of Mrs. J. An
derson, who has been on trial before
jury Of the Trinity Methodist Church
?or cond;:c: anbcco:ning :: christian and
G Methodist, and fer renting ground to
he used rs beer garden, was concluded
Thursday evening, and verdict was
rendered of guilty of both charges with
recommendation Of forbearance ON the
par. Of the church.
"A man of thirty dressed in sheep
skins trimmed with red flannel and
bearing an enormous blackboard in
scribed II am the prophet Elias" recent.
ly appee. ed in the streets of Rye, Eng
land, declaring that he was one of the
tribe of Levi and must journey from
town to town fulfilling his mission and
saving the human race.
-"Why is it," asked young upstart
of q gentle maiden of thirty five, "shy
is it that elderly maidens have q pen
chant for cats ?" "Oh that is eiisiiy
answered." responded the maiden "not
having man to caress, they naturally
bestow their affections on the next grade
of animals in the scale of deceitfulness."
Smarty collapsed.
= AT wedding recently, when the
officiating priest put to the lady the ques-
ton, wilt thou have this man TO be
thy welded husband" ?" she dropped the
prettiest courtesy, and with modesty
which lent her beauty an additional
grace, repi. d, eff you please"
= A class was being examined recent
~ ii . town in Texas. The subject un-
der discussion was the food. Among the
first questions put was, Glow did Noah
understand that therewas going to be a
iiood r. ''i:Cause,;' shouted an urci,in,
"he looked at his almanac !" -
= The small boy of to- day doesn't look
up to George Washington and Benjamin
franklin as examples. No; he thinks
his big brother, who lights cigar ir tho
house, goes out any time, and returns
when he feels like it, is good enough
example for him.
= A doctor went out for days hunt
ing, and on coming home complained
that he hadn't killed anything. 'That's
because you didn't attend to your lesiti.
mate business" said his wife.
- No matter how good .natured man
may be, he will invariably get mad when
ke discovers thatthere 10 no towel in the
room, and he is compelled TO dry his face
on the bed-quilt. tt
- Ii you want 10 hear O man tell n
well-developed, fell.growp fib, just poke
your head in store door and ask change
for FIVE dollar bill.
-.Ma,n said little tirchin, peeping
beneath the bed-clothes, AZ am cold !;
/ want more cover on the bed" Lille
still, my dear,D said the mother. "untii
your sister comes home from church she
has got the comforter in her bustle."
II don't like 10 talk much with
people whc, always s!==ssS agree with Sc. I.
Ia ntnIlkinnr TO comet with nm ecfn "A
little while, but one soon tire, Of it.
Nothing does SO fool man as ex-
trenie passion. This doth make them
fools which otherwise are not, and show
them to be fools that are net.
+ - tits regarded in Washington 90
settled that no movement to repeal the
resumption net will be made, and il made
will flntsna Aifrcessfill. -