The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1878-06-20
Qualifications of Able Editors.
lRnstnn Commercial Bulletin. |

There is to be vacancy on the staff
of one of the city dailies for an assistant
editor, and as we have got hold of some
of the qualifications required, we print
them for the benefit of young men from
the country who may be intending to
become connected with the press. We
can assure all such that it is most fas-
cinating employment, does not require
any previous education or preparation,
and pays enormously.
The principal occupation of leading
editors is to receive enormous bribes for
leading articles; to attend theaters, con-
certs and other places of public resort,
occupying the best places, of course,
and to inform political leaders how they
should regulate affairs.
Assistant editors and reporters, who
are scarce at 1865 a week, generally
work four hours day when they are
not away on vacations, have free passes
everywhere, and the pleasure of their
company is contended for by the elite of
the city.
Among the leading requirements are
the following:
He must be able to cook up leading
articles from the previous days New
York papers into special telegraphic dis
patches.
He must be familiar with the use of
encyclopedias and guide books, in order
to write special correspondence from
London, Paris and Berlin.
He must be able to expand ten line
accident into half column disaster,
with headings to match.
He must be sharp enough, if the pa
per gets little dry, in his description
Of public men and their doings to g fix "
his reports of them so as to tempt the
p. ms. into print, and afford spicy edit
orial comment on their communications.
He must be shrewd enough to credit
especially bright things which he has to
copy, "Ex.,' or "a contemporary" or
"daily paper,"' instead of the real title
of the sheet selected from.
He must be on hand for paragraphs
about Clara Morris, Barnum's caravans,
and Kate Field; ready to reduce half
column puffs of dry goods and cloth
ing advertisements to two sticksful,
and write out interviews with men who
refuse to be pumped.
He must be patient under the request
of three dollar advertiser for ten dol
lar puff of sparring exhibition, travel
ing lecturer or a new invention. He is
expected to be up all night, and wide
awake all day; to catch people at meal
times and, therefore, give up his own
be thoroughly posted in fires, theatri-
Gals, city and Congressional affairs, me-
chanics, physics, astronomy, algebra,
politics. geography, Latin, the classics,
dancing, French, patter the fash, 20
ology, science, the Beecher trial, the
Tilton confessions and election frauds.
He must be ready at all times to sing
song with Moody and Sankey, accept
an invitation to step in and see man
with a political candidate at Parker's
make speech at the Papyrus, crack a
joke with circus clown, discuss divinity
with a divine or acting with an actor
criticise with a councilman, argue with
an alderman, rant with representative
maneuver with the Mayor and gossip
with the Governor.
No man who denominates an esJab
lishment " a stnre," a carnival of crime
ga fight in bar-room," terrific con
fagration' serious fire." temple ot
fashion millinery shop" an eloquen
orator a "stump speaker" a distin
guished member of the bar ga lawyer,
an eminent artist "a stock actor" al
auction sale of works of art " a sale ot
oil paintings" a cantatrice "an oper,
singer" or tonsorial artist a barber,
will stand any chance of obtaining thu
place.
Our brethren of the press will observ'
that we have only indicated few of tn
requisites for the position referred to
the great bulk of the Others will readil,
suggest themselves to every thinking
| mind.