Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1878-02-15
UNCLE ZEKE'S CONSCIENCE.
How Things Were Missed---His "Terrible
Sperences" at the COrn-crib Door.

How Things Were Missed---His "Terrible
Sperences" at the Corn-crib Door.
r. L. MCready, in Harpcr's Magazine.
Some years ago there moved to the
neighborhood of Uncle Zeke's cabin
gentleman from New York, whose iden-
tity may be disguised under the name
Of Smith. The newcomer engaged Wig
orously in farming, and by liberal en-
ployment and prompt payment soon
gained the goodwill of all the colored
people around him. Uncle Zeke in par
ticular was never weary of chanting his
praises, and many bushel of oysters
did Ezekiel convert into money at Belle
vue, as Smiths estate was called, But
all the goodwill of his humble neigh
bors did not suffice to protect Mr. Smith
from pilferings. Shoats would disap-
pear mysteriously during the night,
geese and turkeys would take wing for
parts unknown, and in particular, the
corn-crib would show by unmistakable
signs that it's sanctity had been violated
TO the story of these various losses
would Uncle Zeke incline a sympathet-
ic ear, and his well, now, who ever
hear de like O dat? 'clar to goodness
these yere boys is gittin' wusser an
wusser," evidenced alike his detestation
of the crime and his contempt for the
offender
Smiths patience was at last exhaust
ed, and he determined upon vigorous
measures for the protection Of his prop
erty. His first experiment was to place
large spring rat-trap, artistically con-
cealed in heap of shelled corn, close
by the cathode in the corn-crib door, ex
pecting that the unwary thief, plunging
his hand recklessly through the hole in
the heap, would be caught and held un-
til some one came to set him free. But
10! next morning the trap was found
sprung and the heap of corn diminished,
but the thief had vanished and left no
trace behind.
At last good-sized box arrived from
New York, and the next day the local
carpenter was ordered to fix brass han
dies to the corn-crib; one to be put
alongside the door for convenience, as
Mr. Smith publicly explained, Of steady
ing ones self while turning the other.
The second handle had latch attached
to it by which the door was secured on
the inside and was set in such position
that any one turning it must hold on by
the other knob to prevent being thrown
backward by the opening door. Both han
dies were profusely decorated with glass,
and elected much admiration from the
hands, who submitted them to a critical
examination. The carpenters work be-
ing finished, Smith, in presence of all
his colored employees, solemnly repeated
in front of the corn-crib the first two
lines of the second book of Virgil $
Encid, and announced that his corn
crib was thenceforward secure A box,
stated to contain seeds, was that after
noon deposited in the corn-crib, and
during the early part Of the night the
proprietor of Bellevue secretly busted
himself with coil of insulated wire.
Numerous and diverse were the spec
ulations among the darkies. Jim Oak
ley "'lowed Mis- Smith done 'witched
dat are courthouse, sho' 'nuff, Tell you
gemmen, you touch dem ere handles an
evil sperit carry you way. No such ting
evil sperit? How you know dar is no
such ting? Hush, boy; go see what de
Bible say bout dem ting Pete Lee
didn't b'lieve in no sperits; got gun
fix somewhar inside dat house; turn de
handle an de gun 60 off. Seen dem tings
afore up the country when [ live in
Goozleum' Another theorist avcrred
that while Mis- Smith sayin' of dat ar
Scripter over dem handles, he seen a
white pidgeon come sailin' roun' an
round an roun', an done light on de
peak of de courthouse roof High! tell
you, sab, sumpin up, sho=''
Uncle Zeke, like the rest, was trou-
bled in his mind, but, unlike his fellows
he determined to waste no time in spec
ulation, but to seek his information di-
rect from headquarters. Prepared with
half bushel Of oysters, as an excuse
for conversation, he sought an interview
with Mr.. Smith, and boldly propounded
his questions.
Mis- Smith, what you been a-doin' to
dat ar bin O yourn?"
Why, Uncle Zeke, what do you want
to know for?''
"Oh, muffin, sar; sort o Gurus like.
hearn all de boys talkin' bout it-nevel
seen nothin like dat afore."
"Well, Uncle Zeke, | can't very wei
explain it to you; but l just advise you
don't go near that crib after dark, OF
you may see something you won't like.
And Uncle Zeke departed, revolving
many things in his mind.
1t was midnight-thc hour wher
churchyards are said to yawn, not with
exhaustion, but returning animation
In front Of the enchanted courthouse
stood Brother Ezekiel, a lengthy pole II
his hand and a capacious meal-bag Oye1
his shoulder. In silent meditation HI
stood for some five minutes deliberatins
on the best plan of attack. The great
Newfoundland dog bounded toward him
evidently in rejoicing welcome. Fortl
from his pocket the old man drew a. sa
worry bit Of fried bacon, which the faith
less Bos'cn eagerly devoured. The re
Election ended. the dog Law contentedly