, 1878-06-01

carrying tnem was lnVlslDle.-
She was supposed to be hidden
IN the wheat.
WANTED MoRs.-Ths old saying that
some men weuld want more if they hsd
billion was exempliasd the other day
when Windsorits and Detroiter got
into . dispute at the ferry dock. Said
the Canadian
:'You ought to be we'll pounded; and
I'm the man who can do it! However.
I don't understand the laws over here.
and don't want to be locked up. If you
will come over to Canada I'll pay your
fare both ways on the boat, buy your
dinner. treat you to cigars. lick you till
you can't squeal. and send you home
with best on your eyes,"
Charles Dickens was nevar so happy
as when brewing luscious sips of claret
cup CT punch. Wilkie Collins always
delights in making presents to every
one-a pleasant weakness fer his friends.
The late Mark Lemon, editor of Punch.
was always in his seventh heaven when
acting as amateur billiard marker at any
cauntry house; when he would sit aloft
like jovisl King Cole. as he was, and
crack jokes on everything and every
body, though much to the det1iment of
the play going on before him.
The Sultan's reception of Osman Pas
ha is thus described: He had hardly
entered the royal precincts before the
Sultan advanced to meet him. Waving
ceremony as he took him by the hand !,
hs exclaimed, Here comes my hero.
You are the only one that has sustained
the honor of the Ottoman arms. l swore
to God to kiss you in the eyes should
you ever live to return, and now re-
deem my OATH" With this his Majesty
took the head of the hero in his hands,
and kissed both his eyes. Osman Pasha
was moved to tears at this demons:ra>
ton of affection"
A South Bend young lad, 10 or II
years of age. boasted to a eomrade that
he could make the switch engine tha.
was coming toward him stop. His bet
vas taken and he stepped on the track
in front of the engine and commenced
looking down the track. The engineer
whistled. rang the bell. and fnallys.op-
ped The engine within about two feet of
the young scamp. The boy was kicked
off the track by one of the train men.
Thomas Carlyle. whose sturdy
protest against an Anglo-Russian
war gave powerful check to one of
the strongest of British governments
is generally though. to be beyond
the capacity of young folks to un-
derstand. Yet writer for st, NicA-
olaS has tried in the June number
to interest the youngsters in the
person and works of the reyered
Chelsea seer.
You may pray till you die, but
the Lord will never forgive You for
shooting man in the back" said
Bowler, on being shot by Holiday,
in Collinsbury, La. They were ne
gro farm hands. Bowler soon died,
and Holiday was so impressed by
his words that he has twice tried to
Kill himself.
A rude investigator went into a
spiritual seance in Memphis, with q
squirt gun in his pocket filed with
a bright red. dye, and when the
"materialized" form appeared at the
aperture Of the cabinet. he shot the
liquid with skilful aim. The me-
dunn was afterward revealed with
his face stained red.
Sixty men and women of San
Francisco have gone into the noun
tains, under the direction of Dio
Lewis, to live in tents for four
months. They will eat plain food,
take plenty of exercise, move from
place to place, aud return home.
they hope, in improved health.
Edwi:, Booth has never set foot in
Washington since lis brother assassina-
ted President Lincoln. and he is UNDER
stood to have taken solemn oath never
to visit the capital city. Accordingly
Washington play-goers are compelled to
visit Baltimore to see him.
Fond father: swell. my son, how
. do you like college? Alma Mater hes
turned out some great men," Young
Hopeful: ''les. sir; she has just turned
me out."
Gov. Wade Hampton; Of South Caro-
lima. says there shall be an honest and
tsir election in that state next fall, nc
matter who goes to congress-.