The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1878-05-17
RnIca.

Spice.
The cannlbal who one by one
On missionaries feeds,
Until he has consumed a score,
Then rav'nously proceeds
To gobble up another score,
or aliment 80 crude,
May not be very brave, but then,
He has his forty chewed.
Lady Rosebery's wedding dress cost
81 ,s75.
Deuteronomy as you would have
Teronomy dew to you.
A family in the Fulton county, N.
Y, poor house represents four genera
tions of paupers.
The times has q department headed
"Pearls," which it casts before the
people OF Chicago.-COurier Journal.
He belonged to the tribe of Ashantee,
And he dwelt with his aunt in q shantey,
Whenever he ate
He passed her his plate,
And said, "a little Of that hash, aunty,"
The newspaper maker who enlivens
his columns by stealing paragraphs,
appeals to his readers with ali the elo-
quence of a Whitehall
Times.
In the well-to-do classes of England
5000 children out OF every 10O, 900 die
in the first year of their lives, but In
the poorer classes 1900 in every
100000.
The proud claim of the Coney Is
land Herald: ave can safely say that
our paper has now the largest circula-
ton of any Coney Island newspaper in
the world"
Mrs. Van Colt says: 'sThere will
be more women than men in heaven"
Mohammed says the same thing, and
he added that no ugly woman would
go there either.
Which party is the strongest, the
greenback or the pullback ?-Whitehall
Times. Oh, the pullback has the most
fOllowers-and the largest number of
papers to support it, Norristown
Herald.
A general municipal law in English
cities impose a fine or imprisonment
upon all persons throwing the skins OF
fruit on sidewalks. Policemen arrest
such offenders whenever they can be
detected.
If you feel a touch of the spring
fever, grab spade and dig up a rod
square of garden beds. The fever will
get disgusted and refuse to associate
with such an eccentric man.-Chicago
Journal.
New York Commercial Advertiser 4:
Barnum has rendered the entire Con-
necticut legislature free pass to his
circus and menagerie. These little
amenities between rival shows are
very pleasing.
The fruit crop promises to be i'm :
mensely large, and 1t is gratifying to
learn, in this connection that there are
about three new kind of bugs and two
old fashioned worms coming out with
every fruit blossom.
Punch: Husband-Was the Ladies'
club lively tonight, dear? WIfe-No
awfully dull. Every member was
| present, and of course one can't speak
of people before their faces. So-we
had nothing to talk about.
A boy in Ohio has three eyes, one
where the left ear ought to be. This
is mean. The boys of the other states
can'C have but two eyes. Ohio gets
everything under the present admins
tration Chicago Times.
This is remarkable year. as far as
it has gone. The boy who was the
first to go in swimming this season
instead of catching cold, and dying
two weeks later, as his mother pre-
dicted he would, was run over and
killed the very next day by a mule
team. A terrible disappointment fol
the mother.
A few days ago two female tramp
entered a residence in Merrimsck
Mass, while the family were ont, anC
without ceremony went into the bes
room and went to bed. The first tn,
family knew of this was in the morn
ing when the women got up, dressed
entered the dining-room and demand
| ed breakfast.