The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1878-11-27
THE Pr
aDOMETER
/. Ma6oozls Purchases One and Il Gels
Him Into Trouble.

On Monday morning old man Ma
Goozle went down to Joslin s. Parks
and purchased one of those new fang
led inventions called a pedometer. e .7ss
81 have heard, "said he, as he paid for
the instrument, sthat these things will
tell a nan at night how far he has
walked during the day, where he went
to, and why he went there. You see,
Mr.. Joslin," said the old man ear
nestly, 81 float about the city at a lively
rate, sometimes, and when I imbibe
freely / grow a little oblivious. Idon't
scarcely know where I went or what 1
had been doing. l suppose 1t serve as
q sort Of physical Thermometer, and
will also serve as o gauge or check on
the workings of my massive brain"
"Just So" said the urbane Jervis;
"you've got the idea exactly"
And then old man MaGoozle put the
pedometer in his pocket and walked
triumphantly home to show the curios-
ity to his wife. The old lady eyed 1t
with deep interest, and having thor
oughly posted herself, concluded to
watch the current Of future events.
The instrument, as our readers are
aware, is for the purpose eff measuring
the exact distance the owner walks,
enables him to ascertain the shortest
route between any given points, as also
the speed while walking.
After supper old man MaGoozle took
the pedometer and placed 1t in an up
right position in his pocket.
Being Of a jovisl disposition and in
clined to swallow spiritual fluids, the
old gent grew hilarious with a party of
friends, and not until a very late hour
did he "wend his winding way home
ward. His zig gag route finally led him to
his domicil. Entering softly, the old man
sought his friendly couch without
awakening his better half, and was
soon in the land Of dreams.
Upon awakening yesterday morning
old MaGoozle chuckled inwardly and
fiattered himself that the ''old woman
didn't know he had been on a spree.
How vain were his calculations! She
desired to examine the pedometer, and
in an %unguarded moment he promptly
handed her the instrument. A careful
examination revealed to the old lady
the horrible fact that he had walked
twenty-five miles the night before.
Aud yet he claimed that he .'only went
down town to Muggins' grocery and
back"
1t was all up with the MaGoozle. The
old lady knew perfectly well that a
sober man, walking in n direct line
from the MaGoozle palace to Muggin's
grocery and back again, could not pos
sibly travel twenty-five miles of solid
earth during the two trips unless he
did so in a zig gag manner. you've
been drunk, you old fool, and you
needn't deny it," said the old lady,
purple with rage.
The criminal stood trembling like an
aspen leaf in her presence, and finally
mustered up courage enough to STAN
mer out: "I-I-g-u-e-ss not. That pesky
pedometer-is no good anyhow"
"Oh," said she, ''you can't play that
on me-"
And the enragcd dame proceeded to
deliver a lecture more forcible than
elegant. If it did not contain the elo-
quence Of an Ingersoll, the omission
was atoned for by the energy with
which her arguments were presented.
MaGoozle traded the pedometer for
Budweizer last night, and says Edison
and all.the other inventors are consum.
mate frauds.