Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-07-03
THE EVENING STAR.
July 3, 1873.
WEATHER OFFICE FRAUDS.
An Hour With Old Probabilities.

WEATHER OFFICE FRAUDS.
An Hour with Old Probabilities.
SEVERAL REASONS FOR THIS Hur wE,rsKR-
| ARRANGING THE WINDS AND TEMPERATURES
| SEVERAL DAYS IN ADVANCEMENT We MAY
| EXPECT NEXT WEEK.
MasaINGToN, july Ii was coming down
EiVlewlng the President when met an old
Said aid he; How do you like the weather."
| SAID, OF course, that didn't like il at all
!, line." " 'Ne newspaper
I s;d that still supported life in that way.
B. hG ne; m rather in the writing line nv
self. I'm in the Weather Once" ' my
"Do you correspond with the weather."
Not o.. actly that" said he. "bu. mucb tho
same thing. write out the weather reports"
I'D ike to T. the Weather Office, said i
Then come a.. 'ng, said he.
went r along arre rent
with sofa, several stufle> chairs, and side,
board. This was the appal,en weather Office.
Then we went inside, into i.Hrge back room.
with three desks five or six chars. lounge,
and half dozen spittoonS This was the real
Weather Office.
Three Of US run this department Of the
government" said my friend; "Old ProbS
and Assistant Old Probs, and myself. Old
PrObs and his assistant settle on the weather
and write out the reports and send them
said supposed the weather reports kept
coming in, all day, from all over the country
Yes, they do said he, lover your other
was surprised to see no telegraph instru-
mentS in either room.
why, how DO the reports come inc" /
They come in in your mind that's the only
way they come in, said my friend.
What do you mean?" said /.
Il mean what say" said he There amt
any reports at all
oo Then .ln where do the weather predictions
odd Probs makes 'em. That's what he's
hired for
My friend was shsrpening his pencils ready
yourself easy: But don't give it away, what
I've told you"
He pointed to a seat in front of one of the
desk, that it was the one used by Old Probs.
My friend excused himself, and went down
stairs Tor minute-he said to see a man, but
think ii was to get drink.
AS glanced over Old ProbS' desk | saw
lust In 'front.' OF me, long, narrow strip of
paper, On the top of it, over a number of
notes was written, in bold hand: Weather
Now, the weather is Government business.
Belng voter, am, eX- OfticiO, a member of
In e nov hevennment therefore | picked up the
wEATHtR MEM. AND ENGAGEMENTS
y ~ ane$a ~, June g. to Wednesday, J9tys 1873:
5P. Nj. Must rain early in day, to Settle dust.
Then cool and fair in evening.
L s.
souri, Give him the hottest kind of day, aud
strong east wind in the evening, with threat
| Saturday. June 29.-Bertha:s lawn party, Must
be very warm AID dry all day, so the children
can dance on the grass Pleasantly cool in the
Sunday, June SO.-set a hen. Must be warm and
Sprinkle in the AFTERNOON to lay the dust Very
. hot i'll morning. Cool in evening.
tn. Sdoy, July 2.-Long Branch Races. II ,avy
| Nf1uesJ1u JuI,y 2 -Start for Nbi,a sul,brr
springs. Cool. dry and pleasant.
Eeard footsteps coming up the stairs, and
had barely time to lay the paper on the table
and pick up newspaper. when my friend re-
| entered the room. He brought two cigars and
| we went TO smoking.
Then this office IS fraud, is it2" L asked
"PrincipaIly,' he said.
-. And does Old Probs fix the weather to suit
Yes, when Young Probs doesn't make
| 1uSS about 1t, and have it fixed his own way.
Sh: here they come. They're going to fix to-
! morrOw'S weather"
! room, and, after speaking to my friend, and
I looking sharply at me, seated themselves at
81 have arranged" said Old Probs, 'sto have
! It rainy tomorrow, on account of the Long
Branch races"
That be hanged growled his assistant.
You promised me should have tomorrow
| the way wanted ii to go on picnic
But the raceS?"
Hang the races What do 1 care whether
| the races are spoiled or not? | think, when you
| promise me day the way l want it, you ought
| to let me have it. You've had your own way
every day as long back as 1 can remember
| Give US little show, can't you? didn't COM
| plain on Sunday, when you wanted to set
| hen and made it warm and dry, when couldn't
afford to 20 out Of the city. think you might
| give fellow little chance"
Well, we'll replied Old Probs, in concili-
atory tone, have it as you like, but don't get
angry about it. How do you want it?'
And the wind?'
"Oh, shoot the wind you know that's all
humhug. Put her northeast by south west,
cooler weather in the lower lake region
| I'VE may as we'll fix Wednesday" said Old
| ProbS, as he finished fixing to mOrrow'S wealth
land then, after that, you can have it as you
like for week, for I'm going down to the
Springs. want it cool and pleasant on Wed
ALI right" assented the assistant ssuf
ficient unto tomorrow is the weather thereof ::
the day after may take care of itself"
morrow" said Old Probs, buttOning up his
coat, so you can fix Wednesdays wind to suit
| yourself. But don't make fool of yourself
now Charley, while I'm away, and give them
snow or frost in July. You'll be careful, won't
I'm be CAREFUL said the assistant, and Old
PrObS disappeared. Careful" he continued
Ito give them some of the hottest weather next
week they ever toasted in. l don't own half
| OF country DOardlng-h0uSe Tor nothing, L
| hope. On, no.. I'll give 'em baking. And
on one of the hottest days I'll give EN- a gale
of hot wind that'll make the old ducks open
their eyes, won't it? Make a fool of myself?
| l guess nOt.''
The assistant went out. I was in a daze ::
but the cool air at the foot of the stairway
| revived me- ". Y. Times
| AN ALARMING FEMININE DIsEASE.-One of
| The numerous explanations" in the Acklen-
RosSer matter is the following: Friends of
the lady whom General RosSer seems to have
| supposed himself TO be the reScuer from the