The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1878-11-07
ALL SORTS.

"WHAr is money ?-BwI'ngton
Haokeye, Don't know; ask somebody
who deals in it.
THE Vienna theaters issue no checks
to enable parties to go out between the
acts, and so the boys have to carry their
cloves and lemon peel in their vest
pockets. - Breakfast Table.
con, why should the spirit of mortal
be proud ?" is often asked. Well, really,
we don't know, unless it is because ho
can climb tree and mule can't
Phiadelphia Chronicle. Herald.
THE Sararogian tells of Unitarian
clergyman at the recent conference who
saw the placard Leave your dog out
side and tried to purchase dog in
order to comply with the regulations.
A MINNEAPoLIs cat has achieved
kitten with five heads, and we cal
imagine how sweet it will be when that
cat attains its majority, to have it sit
on the back fence and commune with
itself Breakfast Table.
THE Turner'S Falls Reporter says:
1t is human to doubt. Display a sign
with the incription Beware of Paint
and nine out of ten will draw their fore.
fingers across the newly painted surface
to see if the sign is not merely an in
venton of the enemy
The forest leaves are turning, and the
chestnut worms are squirming, as the
peanut man stands churning them upon
q fiery bed and books will soon be
| 1,In I,,n iity1 w
which nature made on purpose to be
red Wheeling Sunday Leader
IN the sweet, balmy, delicious happi-
ness of loves first young dream, youth
will not only insist on cracking walnuts
for his girl, but in picking out the
goodies as we'll Two years after mar
riage he will not even let her have the
nut, cracker until he is through. Girls,
get married. Breakfast Table,
A GEORGIA farmer bought grand
piano for his daughter. His house is
small, and, to economic room the lower
partof the partition between the kitchen
| and parlor was cut out, and the long
end of the piano stuck through. Pris-
ella now sits at the keyboard, singing
Who will care for mother now" and
the mother rolls out doughnuts on the
other end of the piano in the kitchen.
SLEEP.
When to soft sleep we give ourselves away,
And in dream, as in a fairy bark,
Drift on and on through the enchanted dark
| To purple day break-lttle thought we pay
To that sweet bitter world we know by day.
| We are clean quit of il, as is lark
| So high in heaven no human eye can mark
The swift pinion cleaving through the gray.
| Till we awake i'll fate can do no ill.,
| The resting heart shall not take up again
| The heavy load that yet may make IL bleed;
For this brief space the loud worlds voice is still,
| No fantcst et no of il brings us pain
How will it be when we shall sleep indeed
-AMrich.
"TRY not to pass, the old man said
so the urchin made it "next" instead.
-Ncm Harm Register. And the old
man chuckled and nudged his pard, for
he held both bowers and the joker card.
-Bidgcpon Standard. And the fourth
man muttered, eve can't afford to have
so much talking across the board."-
Mcw York Graphic. Then a smile DER
the urchin's face did steal, as he threw
down six cards and exclaimed, "Mis-
dealp' (But what does it all mean, any
how ?)-NoristO~n HraH.
FLORENCE, the actor, of Hon. Bard
well Slote " renown, was president of the
jury which sampled the wines at the
Paris Exposition, and he informed a
New York reporter that he would not
undertake the task again for all the
vintage of France. The jury tasted
each day for a week from eight a. m. to
three p. M, passing judgment upon
one thousand six hundred bottles The
Turkish representative on the jury was
not satisfied with tasting his glass, but
emptied it every time until he was snor-
ing under the table.
SCARCELY had the Raccoon of Swat
been laid among his fathers before the
Ameer of Afghanistan appears to test
the Atlantic cable with his ill-timed per-
formances: and this, too, while General
Phillipovich is bombarding the Bosnians
at Senkovics, and Janovch is whooping
them up at Kiobuk. Some ideas Of the
terrors of British shindy on the Pun
jaub border may be gathered from the
fact that such names as BarroOkullen,
Ghuznee, Homegrown, MoOtakhsla
and Muznfarabad are likely to be act
lively involved day after day.-Bahi-
more Gazette.
Mr.. DEBARTH is very modest young
man, who never drinks. He has but one
bad habit, and that is tobacco chewing
The other day he rode in Fifth-avenue
car, and he had quid of tobacco as big
As loaf of bread in his mouth. At Four
teenth-street young lady entered the
car. Great Heavens! 1t was his girl!
What should he do? She took seat
beside him, and chatted away right
merrily. The conversation had not pro-
crossed very far when DeBarth's face
began to turn red. He felt for his
handkerchief, but he had none. Then
his face turned purple. In two minutes
more his cheek began to swell. What
could he do2 II his girl caught him
chewing tobacco, that would settle it.
The passengers all noticed that Mr.. De-
Barth was dying, but none of them
moved to assist him. The crisis had
come, and in fl of desperation ID. b;
pointed to the front of the car. All
hands, including bis girl, looked in that
direction. While they were doing 90 be
spit down his sleeve. Then he took the
auid from his mouth and, without look, .
! ing in that direction, threw II out OF
/ the window-or att, mpted to do so. 10
went up against the pane With squash,
and Aattehed out until the car became
dsrkened, Noicsrds-M u Dispatch .
y