Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1878-10-17
Miscellaneous Items
When you cut give good deal, said
the hungry eucher player.Neso York

ceaseV "Why my deara" "Why, Mr.. and
Mrs. w. are sitting on the porch talking
just as sweet as though they weren't
marriedp' = 12*{ a&..s.s5 g.:,. flax.
A Mount Aubin gentleman pointed out
the constellation of the ''Dipper'' to his
little girl the other night SO plainly that
she caught the idea, and after looking
upon it with much interest for minute,
turned and said: "Now, papa, show me
the wash-dlsh.-Baeakfast Table. IL - ~
Having been presented with Bosnia,
Austria is now fighting for it. ITO you,
John" said dying man, 81 will give
100000" "Why, father" said the son
you know you haven't a dollar in the
world ''Of course I haven't, exclaimed
the indulgent father. "yau must work fol
it"- Graphic. :=,%.} y
An indifferent actor was playing Othel-
10 at the Dunedid Theatre. When he
came to the passage, 20, that men should
put an enemy in their mouths to steal
away their brains!" stentorian voice
roared from the gallery, GAIL right, old
fellow, drink away you're SAFE"
CARRIED BY "A LARGE MAJORITY"
I1t pTtSSeu ler 10 his manly breast
She seconded the motion.
His lips on hers he fondly pressed,
There was slight commotion. .....
I'll put the question now, said he,
That you and be married;
He voted AYE" and "aye," said she
-Decided-vote was carried.
He was bachelor, had travelled ex-
tensively, and could speak any language,
dead or alive. Hieroglyphics were moth
ing to him. But when he returned homo
the other day, and talked to his SISTERS
baby, and when it cried and was paci6ed
ny its mother saying, "Did his naughty,
wauty uncle wunkle come honey woney
and scarey warey my little putsey wut-
sey"-he just leaned over the back o: the
chair and wept.
He was an entire stranger to the girls
present, and the boys were mean and
would not introduce him. He finally
plucked up courage, and stepping up to
young lady, requested the pleasure Of
her company for the next dance. She
looked at him in surprise, and informed
him she had not the pleasure of his &C.
quaintAnce. ''Well," remarked Cazano-
via, you don't take any more chances
than do"
Fact. Lady going along the street
t'other day, 'Maclatea boy pathetically
accosts her:--"Piease, mum, won't yer
gimme a penny to buy some bread7
H'aint had nuthin' t'eat all day. Moth
er's sick and fathea's dead. Please mum! !"
"Have nothing for you" 'Maciated
boy trots feebly along side, tearfully re-
peating his affecting story. Lady gets
tired, says, "No, little boyl And don't
want you running after me-" "Hump!
Need't be so d-n stiff about itv' Lady
turns round and sees 'maciated boy
standing on his head against wall.--
Philadelphia Bulletin.
A minister's life has frequent disap
pointments: During the great revival a
stolid, matter-of-fact farmer went into
the inquiry-room, and was at once taken
in hand by anxious and jealous workers.
He seemed to be visibly affected by the
hymn that was sung, and after the prayer
one or two tears were apparently discov-
cred. When asked, "Brother, do you feel
any change?' he made rapid and in
stinctive movement of his hand in the
direction of his vest-pocket. and then set
Ting back in his chair with sigh, re.
piled, "Not cent; that's just what I'm
after"
The practice of widow retaining her
superior title on her second marriage &C.
casionly leads to awkward mistakes Not
long ago gentleman who had opposed a
lady with handle to her name was trav-
cling in the north, and entered in the
visitors book at hotel in Edinburg:
Mr.. and the Countess of -"
Presently the Ian 1lord asked to see the
gentleman privately, and on lis reques-
being gratifed, scandalized the unfortu-
nate bridegroom by saying: 'You ken,
Sir, am a mon of the world like your.
self, and dinna you think you had better
just put Mr.. and Mrs., if its only for
the looks of the thing"
A friend Of mine, a native physician,
was called in few days ago by Turk,
and found him dying of dyspepsia, aris-
ing from torpor of mind and body. He
advised him to ride. II don't like rid
ing," said the patient. "Then," said the
physician, "spend few hours every morn
ing in your harem." II hate my harem,
was the answer. "Then," said the PHYS
clan, ''count your money few hours
Il don't care about money" said the pa
tent. "Then." said the physician, chang
yourself, for how can life be endurable to
| man who does not care for bis horse, or
his wife or his money9"- -Fortnig1tly Re-
Uiew.
Emigration from Europe seems to have
set in again pretty largely for the Atlantic
States. In the month Of August 9,495
persons lett Liverpool as emigrants. This
| is the greatest number in any month dur
ing the present year, except in the month
| of May, when $3.50 sailed. Nearly the
whole of last months emigrants were for
the United States, and more than half OF
the whole number were English. For
merly, for every one English, there were
nineteen Irish emigrants. This is partly
attributable to the gradual advance OF
wages, the increased demand for laborers,
snd the improved condition of small
farmers under the Landlord and Tenant
Act of 1869, one of Mr.. Gladstene's meas
ures of reform i'll Ireland which has turned
out we'll. It was very bold expedient
and experiment.
4 colored brother was telling his young
friend that he ought to CINE the church.
Said George, II would, but de tempta-
ton to do wrong is too strong for me-"
"Whar's yer backbone, dat ye can't rose
up and stand temptation" exclaimed
brother Peter. II was dat way myself
once. Right in dis yere town I had a
chance to- steal par of boots mighty
fine ones, too. Nobody was dar to see
me, and reached cut my hand and de
debbil said take 'em. Den a good spirit
| whispered for me to let them boots
alone" AN you didn't take emp
mo, sah-not much. / took a par o.
cheap shoes off de shelf, and left dem
! boots alone!"
| School Lunches in Paris.
Daily, we have seen the children pass
our house on their way to school. At
night the same return, each one bearing
q basket, which was not the case in the