The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1878-02-05


There il one thing that i always dear.
and that ia excitement. The newspapen
always say It runs high.
Col. Van Horn lectured before the
Kansas City Scientific Society on the spa.
iernity 81 Air." Correct Al editor should
be the father Of wind.
-Barnum s.ys nobody can cheat the
Almighty" Bro. Beecher will nov retire.
Tor il Barnum has failed, there il no use
with minister without any he'll trying his
hand.
will Vis.cher has got . new play.
Dunno much about the new one, bat il he
plays il n 6ne a. he did the old one, there
will be wailing and gnashins Of barkeepen'
teeth on the Pacific slope.
-Wienem warned those Who attended
his execution against bad whisky. 1t II
said he looked straight At Eugene Field
when he gave this last piece ot advice. and
nov his sack" II xxx.
The St. Joe Gasdse in speakin9 Of the
action Of . school teacher there. says:
"rhis may prove to be vaulting ambition
which o'erleaps itself" And noe re want
to know how . woman i going to leap
over herself?
Just let. wait and ne hov many Of
these provincial edition. vho are bowling
and sn"rting for Temperance just nov. will
show their red rihbons at the Stsie Prev
convention next M.y.-N Losis Journal.
A each one to the Conven,io" goe-.
He will wear his colon on his noe.
The Missouri state grange haa sddrea
ed letter tn Gov. Phelps. protesting against
| the orgsniz stion Of the state militia.
That. just the way people work against
their own interests. When the graa~hoppen
come, where's the militia tn fight 'em !?
Are ne going to have any ice!-Boo.
rifle Adrenar.
Derued il ve know. Has anybody prom
,sed you anyf
Shoot the man that writes W.rrenshurx
items for the Sed.lia Wanessbsrg
IN.
NJ, no; shoot him not. But call togeth
er the brass band, and play Hail TO the
Chief"
-Ye.teraay's edition If the Gasaae hav.
in, been exhan.ted.-N. Joe Gascfse.
We Thought il looked weak.
The doctors held an interesting meet.
ing last nighL-Ek.
But the corpse never laughed once.
A lady correspondent aays that girls
should ce.se to be kissed By their gentle
men friends when they pat on long dresses.
Dog gone the dres. A fellow don't kiss
her clothes. whether they are long Or short.
Just a soon kiss woman without raG on,
her back.
A Seislia womanis calves look for all
the world like too deasicated corn cots
and still that internal BAz,o will howl
about "Pettis' superior advantages -
grazing country."-Marska7 De~oera.
For argument's sake, &c will grant that
when SedaIia woman does have q corn. il
is beautiful little pearl, invisible to the
naked eye but when Manhall girl Aspa
her earn. people in Texas wonder where The
"Northen" come from.
The wise virgin nov refuseth to 70 ont
With her gallant unless he previously
saoweth to her HE lsntern, trimmed and
burniny.-&. joe Gasette.
That may d. for 81. Joe. But the wise
virxin here b!oveth ont The light, and slip
ping her arm into that Of her besu's they
pur.ueth their way in darkness, until from
the secluded gloom you hear ss%wish-
smack smsck yum yum /! That's the kind
Of . virgin the Sedalia girl il.
Capt. John Kieffer ssys he has about
30J, 900 tons of ice on his hands.
Strnnsesl man in the world. Finsen
must be cold. though.
oh, the snow, the beauti did you
hear anything drop ?-Boosriue Adrerfiser.
Hist! We did~t Il wasn't the car rat
Ting DER the stony street or over broken
rail, either. II vas-To arms! II b .
brick-bat!
Mrs r. @. Roach reached here Friday
night on visit to that nee Granddaughter
exclusively. BooarjIk AdreTtiar.
On last Friday. ton. Did-av, did the
Governor think the o6eaee premetlitaied !
Or-vhat did the old man ssy, anyhow?