The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1878-09-17
SUNBEAMS.
Revolution leads to Arnica.

Nice tulHS AoA NV eoJ A. VIVA 'Aoo'
sand.
A cool proceeding - Driving an ice
cart.
Bay windows are safe harbors at night
for little smacks.
Why is a woodpecker like trampf
Answer-Because he bores for his grub
Boston Globe.
When a man finds a woman curt in re-
partee he believes her curt in lectures. If
he doesn't he's very imprudent.
The young man who took seat near
the object of his alteration exclaimed, 'this
is juxtapoSition that suits me-"
Red is used for danger-s signals on the
railroads and always means stop" On
woman's nose it ought to give the same
warming.
We never saw man," says an exchange,
'who thought it sin to steal an umbrella" ="
Then you never saw a man whose UNI
brella had just been stolen.
Minnesota father who has five grown
up daughters has sued the county. He
claims that his residence has been used
for a courthouse for the past two years.
Four things are previously empty-a
head without brains, a wit without judg-
ment, heart without honesty, purse
without money.
The Detroit Free Press man says he "got
arrested once for beating drum" Don't
you mean a "drummer'-of Chicago p
| NoTrtStoWn Herald.
Glow nicely the corn pops" said a
young man who was sitting with his sweet
heart before the fire. Yes" she re-
sponded, demurely, ''it's got over being
| green"
'Look out, Miss, your lids coming off, "
said a kind hearted San Francisco boy to a
young woman who, having an uncommonly
big mouth, opened it to smile at friend
| in the street.
Paper, sir" asked the newsboy. "No,
I never read" was the blunt answer. eli,
boys, come here" called out the gamin,
"here's man as is practicin' for the
jury !"
A boy with patch on his knee can not be
hired to go on an errand to the next house,
but he will follow a band all over town
and nev,R realize that he isn't dressed in
Droadclotu.
The following order was recently left
on the slate of New Hampshire doctor;
''Doc cum up to ther house; the old man
has got snaix in his butes again, an raisin'
kahn"
Jones (through the lather)-'S Strange !
can never grow good beard, and yet my
grandfather had one three feet long.
uairdresser-" Can't account for it, sir
unless you take after your grandmother
A cheap revolveri a handy thing to have
about the house. A Missourian drew one
in lottery, and when his wife tried to
shoot him with it it exploded and shattered
her wrist SO that her arm lad to be ampu-
tated.
"Pa," said a little boy, five years old,
II saw a lion and lamb lying side by side
in the meadow this morning" '"Tut, tut,
James, don't tell me such stories" said the
father. II tell you l did," persisted the
child; "but it was dande-lion."
Professor - "What is a monarchy ?'
Freshman - ga people governed by a
King" Professor-"Who would reign il
the King should die ?" Freshman-"The
Queen" Professor-"And if the Queen
should die ?" Freshman-"The Jack. "
Correct
Did the prophet Isiah ever eat at rail.
road station2 1t certainly looks SO, for
how could he have described it so literally
if he had not q? "And he shall snatch Oh
the right hand and be hungry; and he shall
eat on the left hand, and they shall not be
satisfied. - Congregationalist.
whats the matter, sonny" said q man
to youngster who Was tearfully rubbing
the seat of his pantaloons as he walked
along; 'what's the matter, got on the
wrong track" yes" was the reply,
Guess did, way the old man switched
me off jes now."
Two young men were out fishing recently
and ON returning were gong past 1arm-
house and felt hungry. They yelled to the
farmers daughters: "Girls have you any
buttermilk?" ?" The reply was gently waited
back to their ears "Yes; but we keep it
for our own calves"
A Rochester wife opened telegraphio
message addressed to her husband and
read, Jenny will meet you in Syracuse
this evening"" Then she did everything
that a jealous woman could do only to find
that Jenny was lawyer, and the message
was to arrange for consultation in an i'm
portant case.
An Illinois Freshman has the reputation
of having thus outwitted pert Senior.
Senior-''Do you know why the college is
such learned place." Freshman-"Of
course; the Freshmen all bring little
learning here, and as the Seniors never
take any away, it naturally accumu-
lates.
The Newark advertiser whose editor is a
well known scientific writer, says that be-
cause lightning strikes trees one should
.,ox ,oaL oh altar undar q tree Probo