The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1878-02-07
EVERYDAY. SPiCERIES.

et1da 1uotc-
EVERYDAY SPlCERIES.
BUFFALO Express: And what makes
my little Johnny so cross this morning rs
Dot up s urly. "- : ~ go
DANBURY Ners. g A friend in need
is friend--" few want to see while
the pocketbook wears its present amaci-
ated appearance. 80
BuFFALo Express: California desires
an effective game law-one, for instance,
which will define the proper period
wherein to shoot Cinnamon.
ROME Sentinel: A farmer out toward
the Ridge, who bought kicking COW
only three weeks ago., already talks OF
Withdrawing from the church.
HAcKENsAcK Republican: The boy
who loves to linger around black
smiths shop will never pick up nice
clean piece of iron more than once.
NEW YORK Commercial: Oysters are
sold at twelve and one-half cents apiece
at Austin, Nevada. This is what's creat-
ing few raw among the folks in that
city. s,a.,..a.s.. &. :. ..,,fss
NEW York Commercial: The custom
of adjoining the prows Of vessels with a
female head or figure is supposed to
have originated in desire to secure good
port-rates.
/ BosroN Globe: off the Russians
should get possession of the Seraglio,"
says our Dan, meditatively, might tEeeyy
not be called harem scarem set of
! fellowsf' sfs.
New YORK Commercial: A man being
chased the other day by Charlestown
policeman jumped off the end of q pier.
He was rescued, and proved to be an
old offender.
WORCESTER Press: Moody is sick
from oyerwork. Newspaper men seem
to be about the only persons who can
stand the strain of unceasing combat
with the devil. 6a "a,
BEEcHER never attended horserace:
-Breakfast Table. Well, what Of itf
Would you kill this excellent man with
overwork? Do you insist on his doing
everything 7-Neac York Graphic.
81 WILL now offer you Rubens," I"
said the anctioneer, gem in its way"
No bid. The auctioneer passed it, and
taking up another picture. exclaimed:
Come. gentlemen, here is a Rembrandt
by the same."
BosToN Bulletin: Scientists say that
the age of iron is approaching its close,
and that steel will eventually take its
place. The scientific gentlemen are q
little slow; we have BEEN in the midst Of
the age of steal for some time. q
WHEN Longfellow was presented to !
Mr.. Longworth, of Cincinnati, the
| latter remarked: There is no great
/ difference in our names" Yes, re-
Piled Mr.. Longfellow, butporth makes
the man, the want of it the felloac."
"WHY don't you look where you're
| going? said one blind man to another
as they ran against each other on the
street in New York the. other day. A
bystander prevented them from coming
to blows by explaining the situation.
/ CNcINNATI Commercial: A Vermont
! widow of sixty, with ten children, has
married q boy of sixteen. Before the
ceremony her Oldest son, man aged
thirty-fve, knocked down the prospec-
tive bridegroom. However, the happy
youth won't have any mother-in-law.
I THE sweet. singer of Michigan was
smart enough for the Chicago inter-
viewer. You were the Oldest of the
family, were You not p he said. No,
of course not" replied the poetess;
"ny father and mother were both older
than me-" lkrs-sko .s.
BURLINGTON Hawk-E Eye. DIR Oliver
Wendell Holmes is engaged in preparing
poem on John Motley. Same old
tune: g
Tol lum di dunn decide, tol Iam d dunn dee,
,s III ium de dunn decide di dun;
~ ii teetle tol lamty, IA teedle de tee,
Il ~ I'll luHty tum feeble Il tam. 1fs y
NoRRIsTowN Herald: The butter
head woman is now making life size
bust of Lady Godiva. Mrs. Godiva's
only wardrobe, according to the pictures
we have seen, was her long hair, and
Mrs. Brooks should have no difficulty in
: procuring butter of that description.
SAID Sarah to her Noah, dear:
"This world would surely be
desert with no oasis
An, ioveis said he there's one who in.
That sentiments o Iharer,
A Noah, SIS who viii not be
Bereft of his Sahara" b5
D TonEers Gazette.
E to know Won know whether Bob Hawk.
: eve is going to give nm lecturing. He
' eynresses astonisbment If such he the
case as he understands that Roberts lasi
: jaunt in that line was most complete
! and extraordlnary nnanclai success, as
! It YIELDED money enough 70 get MIN
nome.
!, !. Why is II that g oft our lives
In which no bud nor isosss Siassom tbTses
And hope eternal sinks abasedf