Mexico weekly ledger. (Mexico, Mo.) 1855-1956, 1878-08-08
HOW TWO MEN EAT CROW.

Shortly after the war with Great
Britain an aristocratic English gentle
man built a resid snce in the vicinity
of Fort George, on the Niagara from
tier, and, in accordance with the old
country idea of exclusiveness, he in
closed his grounds with a high, tight
fence. Here he lived like an old En-
glish gentleman, Zone of the olden
time" with the exception that none
but the elite of the province and the
officers of the garrison were permitted
to pass his gate. There was very |
good understanding between the
American officers at Fort Niagara
and the British iat Fort George, and
the men were permitted occasionally
to visit back and forth. Among the
Americans was a queer chap who
suffered terribly, was very fond OF
hunting, and who was always getting
into some sort of mischief. One day
this chap took the small boat that lay
mOored at the foot of the wall OF the
fort, and crossed over to the Canadian
shore for hunt. He wandered over
several miles in rear of Fort George
without meeting any game, and on
his return, seeing crow on tree,
in the enclosure OF the aristocrGtlc
Englishman, he scaled the high fence,
fired, and brought down his game.
Colonel B. witnessed the transaction,
and advanced while the soldier was
re-loading. He was very angry, but
seeing the Yankee standing coolly
with loaded gun in his hand, guiped
down his passion for moment, and
merely asked him if he killed the
crow.
~ am sorry" said the Colonel,
"for he was pet. By.the-by, this is
is . very pretty gun. Will you be so
kind % to let me, look at it,"
The soldier complied with the re-
quest. The Englishman took the
gun, stepped back a few PAGES, took
deliberate aim, and then broke forth
in a TRADE of abuse, concluding with
an order to stoop down and take
bite of the crow or he would blow his
brains out. The soldier explained
| apologized, entreated. 1t was nc
use. The Colonel kept his finger or
the trigger, and he sternly repeated
; the command. There was ''Shoot'
in the Englishman's eye; there wal
no help for it; and the suffering
soldier stopped and took bite OF thu
crow; but swallow it he could not
) Up came his breakfast, and it reall.
i appeared as if he would throw VI
u his toe-nails. The Englishman gloat
ed on the misery of his victim ant
smiled complacently at every addl
tional heave. After the man hat
wiped his eyes, the Colonel handel
him his gun with this remark
D sNow, YOU rascal, that will teach yol
e how to poach on gentleman's in
s closure
The Yankee soldier took his gun
l and the Colonel might have seen th'
r devil in his eye if he had looked
: close. Stepping back he took delib
: crate aim at the heart of his host, ant
: ordered him instantly to finish th'
r crow. Angry expostulations wer'
: useless. There was 'shoot" in th'
Americans eye, as there had been il
the Englishman's. There was nj
help at hand, and he took a bite o
the crow. One bite was enough, anC
while the Englishman was in an agony
of sickness, Jonathan escaped to th,
American shore.
The next morning early the com
mandant at Fort Niagara was sitting
, in his quarters, when the Colonel wa
, announced.
s'Sir," said the Colonel, 81 come
to demand the punishment of ont
of your men, who yesterday entered
my premises and committed a grea
outrage"
n "We have here three hundred meh
v and it would be difficult for me tt
' know who you mean," said th'
4 American officer.
e The Englishman described him as I
e long, dangling, suffering, stoop
I shouldered devil.
e "Ahl 1 know who you mean," sale
sl the officer. "He is always gettins
into mischief. Orderly, call Tom ,
In Q moment Tom entered, ant
+ stood all attention, and straight a
> his natural build would allow, whil'
y not trace of emotion was visible il
}, his countenance.
e "Tom,'' said his officer, "do yol
c know this gentleman?'
g "Ye-ye-yes, sir"
It "Where did you ever see him be
e fore?"
"I-I-I," said Tom stutterin:
awfully, but regaining the grave ex
y preston natural to his face-I did
dined aoith him yesterday.
Tom was not punished.
When you hear q man talking q
big about the I'D rebels or tn
"d-d federals," just mark it dow
that he was too cowardly to engag
on either side during the slate un