Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1878-05-25
OFFICIAL PAPER OF LYON COUNTY.
published every Wednesday and Saturday
morning. by
FRANK KEN NYON.
TERMS:
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

How to get along in the world--
Walk.
He who has good wife can bear
any evil.
The early angler catches the worm
and cold.
Carpets and hand organs are be-
ing turned.
Wigs. in the language of flowers,
are lie-locks.
A "certainty in religion"-The
contribution box.
Console yourself: "While there's
life there's SOAP"
Greenbacks as good as gold, and
Elizabeth has resumed.
A new bonnet is called the Star
because it comes so high.
Woman tempted man to eat; but
he took to drink himself.
Friendship between women is only
a suspension of hostilities.
Mrs. Stove has only made $780,
900 out of "Uncle Toms Cabin"
An Indiana paper heads its mar
riage notices "Limited Partnerships"
A word to topers-Don't complain
so much of your luck. It's all in
your rye.
In standing up for the right it is
sometimes necessary to knock down
with the left.
The laugh of the farmor-Hoe!
Hoe! Hoe! The laugh OF the maiden
He! He! He!
The times are hard-every body
says so-but the wages of sin have
not been cut down.
Women are generally pretty smart;
but they cannot hold a candle to
can of kerosene with safety.
Meet for repentance-Meetin your
girl when her father who is opposed
to it, is loafing around home.
There is one class of men who
don't want Congress to adjourn. 1t
is the fellows who keep liquor sa-
looms in Washington.
Eve never looked through Adams
over-coat pocket for letters from
other women, and why should wo-
men Of the present day?
In purchasing an umbrella, says
the Whitehall Times, always select
blue ribboned one, as it is the
blue ribbons that keep you dry.
1t is said that the better looking
of the pair will be the first to make
up in case of family row. Cut
this out for fear your wife will see it
and want to be first
A young man of 90 recently took
as wife Pennsylvania widow of
so, the sole proprietress of couple
of paying petroleum wells. He loved
not wisely but two wells.
A Minnesota girl has been serving
on railroad as brakeman in male
attire. She gave civil answer to
the question Of passenger, when
her sex was at once suspected.
A monument of pure steel is talked
of for Boss Tweed.
Money is so plenty that young men
are wearing pantaloons with checks
on them.
Noah Webster defines bonnet as
ga covering for the head of female"
Oh, Noah!
Do not insult the under man IN n
fight by telling him there is plenty
OF room on top.
Lydia Thompson is worth quarter
million dollars. SO much for dress
ing economically.
1t is better to have loved and have
busted up somewhere during the cor
respondence than never 10 have loved
at all.
"Sir," said an old judge to a young
lawyer, "you would do we'll to pick
some of the feathers from the wings
of your imagination, and stick them
in the tail of your judgment"
A tom-cat is a more independent
animal than man. When man
comes home at 2 or 3 o'clock in the
morning he slips in as quietly as pos
sible, but a tom cat don't seem to care.
The later the hour, and the nearer the
house it approaches, the louder it
will yell.
A bevy of children were telling
what they got at school. The eld-
est got reading, spelling, and def
nitions. "And what did you get,
little one9" asked the father, of rosy
checked little fellow, who at the
time was slyly driving tenpenny
nail into the door-panel. "Me. /