The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1878-03-19
NUMBER 5.
CURED BIZ CIEMAffoN.
How the Fear Of Fire Aroused 4
Suffering WOman's Wrath.
[Cincinnati Saturday Night =

[Cincinnati Saturday Night
Mrs. Boggs had been Under the wealth
er for two or three days. AT least she
said she was, ,bnt these stacks came rath-
er frequently, Boggs thought, for when
his wife was having one Of her Oft spells
he had to cook the meals and do all the
housework. We don't remember what
particular state the weather was in this
last time, but Mrs. Boggs was under it;
and she was under 1t very bad. She
even told Boggs that she didn't believe
she was ever going to get up cut of it,
and she madea hysterical request that
be bury her IA some sunny spot wherS
the birds might come and sing to her,
and she made him promise that he would
bring flowers once week and scatter
them over her grave. A dozen times
that day Wis Boggs called from his work
in the kitchen to bid a last farewell to
his dying wife, but still she fingered
He had been through this experience 8
great many times before, 80 be wasn't
so much alarmed as he might otherwise
have beeen.
That night as he sat watching. like the
afectionate husband he was, at her bedi
side, she saw that he was deeply en-
|grossed in book.
What book are you reading, dear7''
she family asked. 10
"A railroad guide, my love-" was the
reply.
"Hhat do you want with railroad
guide !" she inquired. a3g
81 want to see how far it is to WASH
lington, Pa, and how the trains run,n
said Mr.. Boggs. av
| She would have asked him what he
had to do with Washington, Pa. but be
got up aid vent out. and she fell into I
Idoze, the inclination TO which she didn'}
care to repress, even though it delayed
the final departure that she had so often
Iprated about When she awoke she saw
Boggs bending over her with a candle.
He evidently hadn't observed that she
was awake, so closing her eyes she
lfeigned sleep ana overheard the follow
| ing soliloquy, which sufficiently explain.
! ed to her now thoroughly awakened
senses his inquiry OF the railroad guilds
about the route to Washington, Pa. |!
l"Splendid subject for cremation-a iittld
scraggy Mrs. Bogg's fingers worked
nervously under the bed clothes and she
had hard work to keep from flying st
him but the scraggy ones incinerate
quicker than the fat ones, the doctor
says She could be creased II necessStS
to make fiet 60 quicker. Think I'll send
her up by express, as Tn too busy in
the store to get away. Her. ashes can
be forwarded to me in an envelope
through the mail. I'll know them Tau
dible chuckle.j They'll be under the
j weather every few weeks and want TO
die And they'll ask me to bury them
in some sunny spot were the birds can
come apd sing to .'em. III send, word
to DR.. LeMoyne to make IL hot f6r Der
I-she has kept things hot enough f0t
me- And III tell him to let all; the re.
Iporters in, SO as to give her good send
off through the papers, and whoop ,ei
| up Liza jane Sorry l can't be there to
stir her up myself, and--'' s
/ A thrilling ear piercing scream came
from the woman under the weathet. and
with hound sufficient to land her on
! top of any weather that ever lived, she
sprang out of bed and had Boggs by
| the ear in a fash, while she fairly scream
ed:
you'll cremate uie, will you, you
bald headed old reprobate! you'll send
|my scraggy body DIP to Washington by
express (giving his ear a wiring between
the sentences) and tell that wicked old
| wretch, LeMoyne, to make it. hot fol
ME; and you'll have my ashes sent to
lyou in a letter (growing thore and more
wrathy, and humping him over the head
with the candlestick she had snatched
, away from his hand !; and bury me in
some sweet, sunny spot fwhack y where
, the birds may come and sing fbing
and you want the reporters there bang,
!, Ito whoop'er up Liza Jane (boom =
! Oh, you mean, wretthed, wicked old
, man, you; I'll live q hundred years te
spite you, see il I don't!''
!. Then she pushed Boggs out Of tht
a door and bolsed it, and be, had to make
r up bunk OF the kitchen door that nigh
q next to the stove Bdt peculiar Asmilt
played about Boegs's face, even wheI
, he was rubbing the sofe spots on BIZ
: bald head, and murmursd softly to him
q lself, @Guess I've cured her Of then
g spells for, one while"
Mrs Boggs hasn't been under th'
weather since, but mention Of the wort
h cremation drives her wild.