Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1878-12-11
Family Troubles.

Family Troubles.
Nearly every family has its own trouble.
The skeleton in every closet y is not al
together hoax. Human nature is frail
and seldom are all hearts and minds in n
household so adapted and adjusted one to
another that no word will be misspoken
and no wound will ever be given. In all
families there are things TO " bear and for
bear" No imperfect being should expect
it to be otherwise.
But there is great difference in fami-
lies in their management of their troubles.
Some wisely make no mention and give no
sign abroad of ills at home and others
never 4" hold their tongues In every
community few families are the town
talk " because of their varances and in
discretion. In our pastoral work we have
been called TO listen to many II story of
household alienation and so We write not
altogether in ignorance.
Every alienation grows worse with pub
licity. The more family trouble is spread
abroad the more difficult is it to harmon
ize the parties concerned. Talking with
others always makes bad matter worse.
No outside friends can come in and settle
any home quarrel 50 we'll as the family
can DO it alone. The telling to others puts
the tell-tale in Il position where he cannot
III l. 4 s,,,
Very few friends" are faithful y
enough to so counsel the tell-tale rs to les
sen the feeling of alienation. Almost all
find themselves not so much relieved in
telling of their home griefs-rather they
are more set in their own ways thereby
A little retailing of these things puts a
person on his own defense. If he says any
thing at all he must needs make his own
side and view of the difficulty fair to his
auditor.
In family troubles as we'll rs others
there is usually more than one at fault
and the less faulty have reason enough to
be silent
The tongue alone can cure no family
trouble. No stranger, though sanity, il
capable of restoring the banished dove o
peace. IF II family trouble is ever settled
the troubled family must themselves dc
the good work. And the work must be
wrought in the heart.
Many family would find their troubles
disappearing if themselves would cease
mentioning them. Many families need
only this in order to peace and love anC
harmony-to conduct themselves wher
alone as well us they do in the presence o
respected guests. Nobody should be asked
or expected to keep another's family trou
BILE secret. And only as Il rery last reSor
should anybody carry the tale of trouble
ut home to any outside party.
The world slowly learns the art of lovt
and happiness at home. 1t consists very
much in forgetting each others whims anC
foibes and faults and keeping most il
mind each others eXcellenccs If one
shall allow himself to dwell much upol
anothcr's tailings he will soon bccom
blinded TO his good qualities.
Tell no tale of family troubles in humar
cars. Such secrets are never perfect
safe. Once mentioned and there is th
beginning of strife and such strife as sci
dom ends.
Sef-respcct forbids telling others G
home troubles. The least desire for peace
and harmony again should prevent sue
tale-telling. 1t is bad enough to have trou
bic in the family, but it is worse if tn
public is made II spectator of the scene
and so Il participant in the strifes.
Temporary or permanent separation
are manifold better than retailing to th
world the ills and mishaps of home.
There are heroic men and most roya
women whose companions are seen to b
what they ought not to be and who's
homes are known to be robbed thereby {
Joy, but they go and come expressing I
complaint abroad and the communities
which they live feel forbidden to pry I'M
their family gricfs and the world fee
bound to respect and pity such men ar
women.