The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1878-12-12
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AS YOU LlkEIT
Genuine benevolence is like a turkey
on a spit before the fire; it keeps going
round and doing good.
The man who gets his living by his
wits alone generally works with too
small capital. He only succeeds in
failing.
La Fruyere says us riches and favor
forsake man we discover him to be
a fool, but nobody could find it out
in his prosperity.
It is fashionable to wear your
clothes long this year. The times
are so hard that you wear everything
as long as you possibly can.
The people Of the provinces felt so
badly at the loss Of Lord Dutferin
that they have been for-Lorne ever
since he left, and expect to remain in
that condition.
1t is as impossible to live peacea.
bly, in q house with hot tempered
person as it is to take a nap in room
when a hornet is buZZing on the
window. He may sting at any
minute.
1t is a very consoling fal} that if
some people were to sA4,Jusly set
about the work of collecting their
thoughts they would have merely
nominal task. 1t would not be neces-
sary to search either long or far.
If she won't she won't, and there s
the end ont. A lady in court. being
asked her age, replied that she didn'
know; she couldn't remember the
exact hour when she was born and
could only depend on hearsay. Hear
say is not evidence, and the matter
was ruled out.
1t has been philanthropically sug.
gested that every right-minded man
will have his life insured in order to
give his successor in the objection of
his wife fair financial start in life.
This is certainly a cheerful view of
the subject, but the better method is
that of the Irishman who determined
to live long enough after his death to
spend the money himself.
One of the prettiest things Haydn
ever said was in connection with the
picture of the beautiful Mrs. Billing
ton, whose portrait Sir Joshua Rey-
nOlds had just painted. cts just
like her, remarked Haydn to Sir
Joshua, ''but here's a strange mis-
take" sWhat is that!' inquired
the artist. "Why, you have painted
her listening to the angels when
you ought to have painted the angels
listening to her
Some men have happy faculty of
explaining events. They tell just
enough to allow the imagination free
play. One person will recite all the
details, but another will simply sug-
gest them. A gentleman made his
appearance among his companions
with several portuberances on differ
emit parts of his face, evidently of sud
den growth, and an eye that was dis
colored and temporarily useless.
"Why, what has happened I" was
very naturally asked. "Oh, nothing
was the reply. Il just meta man, and
while we were talking | took the
liberty to disagree with him; that s
ALL"
Mothers-in-law are an institution
which tries mems souls. and simply
because they are not understood
They are not intended, rs is the cur
rent opinion, us Il perpetual chastise-
ment for sins committed in previous
stage of DarWinian existence, and if
things go amiss in the household YOU
will notice that it is always because
they are not permitted to have their
own way. Only that and nothing
more. Ii you Will protect them in
their inalienable right to interfere in
all your pretty arrangements there
VIII be no more trouble. How
twisted out of shape, then, how thor
oughly alienated from the proper ad.
justment and order of society, must
that man $ mind be who Obstinately
persists in Understanding the value
of mother-in-law to the harmony OF
new home! Every fibre of our be.
ing revolts at the deed of that unap-
preciative man who put spring gun
III his melon patch and then sent his
mother-ln-law to the field every day
to bring home the luscious fruit.
That man evidently had designs. He
watched expectantly to hear the gun
go off. and hoped that when it did the
old lady would go of too.