The National tribune., 1878-05-01
How Edison Amuses Himself

Edison, the phonogaph is wretched unless he in
vents half dozen things every day. He does it for
amusement when regular business isn't pressing. The
other day he went out for little stroll and he thought
out plan for walking Leg rest the other
before he had gone a square.
He hailed milk wagon and told the driver of little
invention that had popped through his head just at that
moment for delivering milk without getting out of his
wagon even stopping his horses simple force
with hose attached worked by the foot would do the
business Mflkmen who dislike to halt for anything in
their mad career because prevents them running
as many children they might otherwise do would ap
precate this Improvement Edison isn't sure but that
sausage and pigs feet could be delivered in the
way.
He stepped into the hotel office and observing the hui
mtons which the guests encountered in seeking OBJ
tain information from the hgh-toned clerk he sat down
in the readngroom and in five minutes had invented
hotel clerk to work by machinery warranted stand
hind the counter any length Of time desired and
al questions with correctness prompncss and suavity
diamond pin on and hair parted in the middle if desired
Loupgng into the blard-room he struck with the
needless amount Of cushions required each table Quick
as lightning he thought of better and more economical
pan--cushlon the balls! lie Immediately pulled out
postal card and to Washington applying for patent
lmbibing mint iulep in the saloon adjoining a bril-
liant idea flashed through his fertile brain and before he
left the place he had invented an instrument that is likely
to evoutionize the entire saloon business It is ma
chine constructed that when person who has been
parang of spirtuous beverages breahes into it, the
ton of his breath upon peculiarly prepared substance
also the invention of Mr. Edson-made to reyove slowly
by of small crank makes an impression that
by again applying the lips and turning the crank the other
way, the effects of the drink be reproduced as MANY
times desired matter how great length Of time
may have elapsed provided with one of these in
struments could prepare himself with cocktails for long
journey simply for the price of drink Edison chris
tened it the toddygraph" OF course the saloons will
fight against it bitterly it destroy business of
nnety-nine out of hundred of them A person can mix
his drinks just TO suit himself and then stock his toddy
graph with supply of different mixtures sufficient to last
lifetime And when he has drank himself to death with
it, his children bring the instrument occasionally
and revive the tender recolectons of their parent bv
turning the crank and getting Whit of the old man's
breath
capital assistant the toddygraph would be to the tenn
perance cause Wives whose husbands let that they
don't drink could have ready to them when they
come home late at night. The genuineness of Murphy
ties reformation could also be determined by it. And how
easy to expose the fraudulent temperance lecturer It
wouldnt answer for of them get within quarter
of mile of it.
When Edison started go out he had to pass the bar
Der shop OF the hotel and as he did he sighed think
could never hope TO equal the knight of the razor as
taking machine This saddened him so that he went
home and invented that day.-CjaoaRat5 Sqtur
day Night