The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1878-05-17
A PUZZLED DUTCHMAN.


A Wisconsin secular paper contains
the following good story: One who
does not believe in immersion for
baptism was holding a protracted meet
ing, and one night preached on the
subject of baptism. In the course of
his remarks, he said some believe it
necessary to go down into the water
and come up out of it, to be baptized.
But this is claimed to be fallacy, for
the proposition stinto'' of the scrip
lures should be rendered differently,
for it does not mean into at all times.
tsMoses," he said, we are told, "went
up into the mountain, and the Savior
was taken into a high mountain" etc.
Now we do not suppose that either
went into q mountain, but unto it.
means simply going down close by
or near the water, and being baptized
in the ordinary way by sprinkling or
pouring.
He carried this idea out fully, and
in due season and style closed his dis
course, when an invitation was given
for any so disposed to rise and express
his thoughts. Quite a number of
brethren arose and said they were
glad they had been present on this
OCCASION; that they were pleased with
the sound sermon they had just heard,
and felt their souls greatly blessed.
Finally a corpulent gentleman of
Teutonic extraction, a stranger to all,
most painful, as follows:
Mister preacher, ish so glad wash
here tonight, for 1 has had explained
to my mint some dings dat never
could pellet before. Oh, so glad dat
into does not mean into at all, but
shust close by or near to, for now
can pellet many dings vot could not
pellet pefore. We reat, Mr.. Breacher,.
dat Daniel was into de ten of lions
and came out alife! Now never could
pellet dat, for de wilt beasts would
! shust eat him right off; now it ish
ferry clear to my mint. He vat shust
close by or near to, and It'd not get
| into de ten at all. I ish so glad wash
here tonight.
Again we reat dat de Hebrew chill
and dat air alwish looks like a peeg
story, too, for they would have been
burnt up, but it ish all plain to
nay mint now, for they were shust
cast near by or close to the irish furn.
ish. Oh! ish SO glad wash here to-
night.
And den, Mister preacher, it ish
said dat Jonah vas cast into de sea
and taken into de whalsh pelly. Now
I never could believe dat. 1t always
seemed to me to be a peeg fish story,
put it ish all plain to my mint now.
He vas not into de whalsh peIIy at
all, pot shust shumped onto his pack
and rode ashore. OH! vas so glad 1
vas here tonight.
And now, Mister PREACHER, if you
will shust explain two more basages
of Scriptures I shall pc, o so happy
dat I vas here tonight! One OF dem
ish we're it saish dc wicked shall pc
cast into a lake dat burns with fire
and primstone always. O! Mister
PREACHER, shall pc cast into dat lake
if I am wicked ! or shust Ply or near
to, shust near enough to be comfortable?
o! I hopes you tell me shall pc cast
only shust by good way off, and I
will be so glad 1 wash here tonight.
The other passage is dat vich saish,
blessed are they who do these COM
mandments, that they may have right
to the dree Of life and enter in through
the gates of the city and not. shust
close by or near to, shust near enough
to see vat I have lost, and 1 shall pc
so glad I vas here tonight!
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