Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1878-04-03
Joe BeesIey's Asthma Cure.

i'm the wilderness of Pike County, fa.
Ex-Judge John Scott, of New York,
was one of the party. The Judge is
afflicted now and then with the asthma,
and one evening we got into Thomas
westbrook's tavern after a hard days
fish, and the Judge was wheeling pretty
stiff. That night ex-Congressman
Jake Kieinhans, Of Milford, drove
out to Blooming Grove-that's where
we were-where he has $50, 900 tam
merry. The Congressman is great
joker. He saw the Judge getting right
up on his toes reaching after wind, and
said, innocently and sympathetie-like; !;
''why, that's what Joe Beeseley had !;
but Joe cured himself"
The Congressman couldn't say how
Joe had cured himself, but he said that
if he was in the Judges place he'd
drive out TO Joe's in the morning. "lts
only twelve miles," said he.
The Judge said that was quite pull,
but by-and-by he said, in that melan-
choly way of his:
But if you'll go with me, Cahill, I'll
go. l don't mind a jog of twelve miles,
and I'd put up with a good deal, any
how, TO see man who mas got the best
of the asthma"
$50 next morning. never smelling
arat-we borrowed Captain Westbrook's
blackboard wagon and his off-mIile and
started for Joe Beeseley's on the road
they pointed out to us. The road went
plum into tine woods after about mile,
and-weH, talk about Jordan being a
hard road to travel. III bet this road
could double discount Jordan. 1t was
roots and logs and rocks and gullies and
hills, one after another, until Scott said
he might as well have stayed at the tav-
ern and died with the asthma, as to risk
breaking his neck looking for remedy.
Well, we went on into the woods for
about two hours. No sign of house or
a clearing of any kind, and We began to
think we'd lost our way. We stopped
the mule, and while we were talking as
to what was best to do, we say long,
slab-sided backwoodsman coming along
the road toward us. The Judge was
breathing rather wheezy, so / said
'goOd-day' to the stranger, and asked
him If family by the name of Beeseley
lived anywhere about there.
"Y-a-a-s," he said. 1.-TWO miles on
y'll find EN-
I &c u l-,,axtr the Raaca1Qrs
"Y-a-a-s. lister work FIR old joe"
''He used to-haye-the asthma-did
he not?" inquired the Judge.
"Azmy, Amy, No canal hoss as
ever limped never had tn heaves worse
n old Joe did. Why, he had t bad, he
did. | member, when | fus' went t
work for him, | were mowin' in a med
der bout three-quarters of mile from
tn house. didn't think 'twere noon
vet. but | heard tn dinner horn toot,
n off | started f'r tn house. PoOty
soon she footed ag'in. Mebbe they
think I'm deef, thinks |. but | hurried
up little. l hadn't gone twenty steps
fore tn horn give mother yoop, this
time sich an onearthly one th't thinks
mebbe tn house IS on fire, N starts on
a run. | got there all in a sweat. The
old woman was in the garden pullin'
weeds. What's the matter 2 sez, you
blOwed the dinner-horn so. Dinner
horn, she sez. Il amt blowd no din
ner horn Jis' then / heerd the yoop
again. What the devil is that then? p
sez. oh, that's the old man. she said.
Hes out on the front stoop ras lin
with the amy tell you, stranger,
he had it uncommon tough, old Joe
did"
''We couldn't well deny that"
"Wel," said the Judge, she cured
himself, didn't he? Mr.. Kleinhans
told us so, and sent us out here to get
his remedy"
| thought the countryman was going
to have fit. His face went through
variety of contortions, and he sat down
on stump and rubbed his sides. After
a while he raised up and said:
Jake sent y out, did he? might a.
knOwed that. Y-a-a-s, stranger, old
Joe did cure hisself, but they amt no
use o'you're goin' t tn house L get the
receipt, for tn old man amt home, n
1 kin give y that perscripti'n to dot.
''We would be greatly obliged to you
for it" replied Scott.
"Lemme see-'twere four wears ago
las summer I Joe got rid o. it FIR three
r four days. Long fore daylight one
morning heerd tn old man get up an
go down stairs. think v KID heerd
him a mile off, an he want takin' in
wind at tn rate o more'n one breath
ev'ry five minutes. Iwentt' sleep g'in,
an got up early in tn mornin' as usual.
| went out on tn first stoop. Joe sot in
big arm-cheer t ne had out there.
Flo! Josephn sez /. 'How's the
wheezers this fine mornin' in June?'
He didn't say nothin, n so l stepped
up t his cheer. Good reason t was, t
he didn't say nothin.' In one han was
a piece o. paper with writin' on it,
sOi1tlHlu like lUls - HIS AMY 5 DIN
a botherin' me FIR tn las twenty-five
years, but I've got the best O. tn darn
thing at last" In t'other ham was his
big buck-horn huntin' knife. He'd cut
his wizzin-pipe clean of, an was dead
er n stone. Joe had cured hisself o.
tn Amy, an stranger"
But had turned the mule towards
home, and waited to hear no more.
| looked back once. The backwoods-
man lay in the middle of the road, kick
ing and rolling, and trying to stuff his
old hat in his mouth. The Judge only
spoke once on the way in. He didn't
speak as if he was mad, but think you
could have heard him mile:
''I've been inclined to think that there
was no such thing as endless punish
ment," said he; ''the Bible says that
Liars shall have their portion in the
lake that burneth, ETC." I'm of the