Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1878-05-03
Mark Twain.

| ublts, WHICH, WA - 49,
Worlds ingenious Fabulist, for the lessor
they taught me and the pleasure they gav'
me. They lay always Convenient to my hand
and whenever l thought meanly of my kinC
turned to them, and they banished tha
sentiment whenever felt myself TO be self
ish, sordid, and ignoble | turned to them,
and they told me what to do to win back my
self-respect Many times wished that the
charming anecdotes had not stopped with
their happy climaxes. but had continued the
pleasing history of the several benefactors
and beneficiaries This wish rose IN my
breast so persistently that at last l deter
mined to satisfy it by seeking ont the sequels
of those anecdotes myself. So | set about 1t,
and after great labor and tedious research
accomplished my task. ] will lay the result
before you, giving you each anecdote IN Its
turn, and following it..with its sequel as
gathered it through my investigations.
THE GRATEFUL POODLE.
One day o benevolent physician (who had
read the books), having found stray poodle
suffering from broken leg, conveyed the
poor creature home and, after setting and
bandaging the injured limb, gave the little
outcast his liberty again. and thought no
more about the matter. But how great was
his surprise. upon opening his door one
morning, some days later, to find the grateful
poodle patiently waiting there, and in its
company another stray dog. one OF whose
legs. by some accident. had been broken.
The kind physician at once relieved the dis
tressed animal, nor did he forget to admire
the inscrutable goodness and mercy OF God,
who had been willing to use so humble an
instrument as the poor outcast poodle for the
intoxicating OF, etc, etc, etc.
.Sqlel.-The next morning the benevolent
physician found the two dogs, beaming with
gratitude. waiting at his door. and with them
two other dogs,-cripples. The cripples were
speedily healed, and the four went their way,
leaving the benevolent physician more over
come by pious wonder than ever. The day
passed, the morning came. There at the
door sat now the four reconstructed dogs,
and with them four others requiring recon-
struction This day also passed, and anoth-
er morning came : and now sixteen dogs,
eight of them newly crippled, occupied the
sidewalk, and the people were going around.
By noon the broken legs were all set, Int the
pious wonder in the good physicians breast
was beginning TO get mixed with involuntary
profanity The sun rose once more, and ex
hibited thirty-two dogs sixteen of them with
broken legs, occupying the sidewalk and half
OF the street the human spectators took up
the rest of the room. The cries of the wound
ed, the songs of the healed brutes and the
comments of the on-looking citizens made
great and inspiring cheer, but traffic was in
terrupted in that street The good physi-
cian hired q couple of assistant surgeons and
got through his benevolent work before dark,
first taking the precaution to cancel his
church membership. so that the might ex-
press himself with the latitude which the
case required.
But some things have their limits. When
once more the morning dawned and the
good physician looked out upon n massed
and far-reaching multitude of clamorous and
beseeching dogs he said. 81 might as well
acknowledge it, | have been fooled by the
books they only tell the pretty part Of the
story, and then stop. Fetch me the shot
gun this thing has gone along far enough.
He issued forth with his weapon and
CHANGED TO step upon the tail Of the original
poodle. who promptly bit him in theleg.
Now the great and good work which this
poodle had been engaged in had engendered
in him such a mighty and angmenting en-
as to turn his weak head ut last and
drive him mad A month later. when the
benevolent physician lay in the death throes
of hydrophobia, he called his weeping friends
nbout him, and said
Beware Of the books They tell but half
of the stony. Whenever poor wretch asks
you for help, and you feela doubt AZ to what
result may flow from your henevolence, give
yourself the benefit of the doubt and kill the
applicant"
And so saying he turned his face to the
wall and gave up the ghost.
THE BENEVOLENT AUTHOR.
A poor and young literary beginner had
ried in vain to get his manuscripts accepted
At last when the horrors OF starvation were
staring him in the face, he laid his sad case
before celebrated author, besceching his
counsel and assistance. This generous man
put aside his own matters and
proceeded to peruse one of the desplsed
Having completed his kindly
ask, he shook the poor young man cordially
by the hand, saying Il perceive merit in
his come again to me on Monday. AT the
lime specified, the celebrated author, with n
sweet smile, but saying nothing spread open
maeazile which was damp from the press
What was the poor mans astonishment to
discover upon the printed page his own arti-
lie. "How can l ever, said he. falling upon
ais knees and bursting into tears, testify
my gratitude for this noble conduct z The
celebrated author was the renowned Snod
grass the poor Young beginner thus rescued
from obscurity and starvation was the after
wards equally renowned Snngsby. Let this
pleasing incident admonish us 10 turn n
,haritable ear to all beginners that need
lelp.
Sequel next week Snagsby was back
with five rejected manuscripts. The cele-
grated author was a little SURF nsed, because
N the books the young struggler had needed
1ut one lift, apparently. However, he plow-
ed through these papers, removing unneces-
'ary flowers and digging up some acres of ad-
and then succeeding in getting
.wo Of the articles accepted.
A week or SO drifted by. and the grateful
Snagsby arrived with another cargo. The
,elebrLted author had felt mighty glow of
satisfaction within himself the first time he
mad successfully befriended the poor young
itruggler, and he Ind compared himself with
the generous people in the books with high
qualification but he was beginning to sus-
pect now that he had struck upon something
fresh in the noble-episode line. His enthu-
siasm took u chill. Still, he could not bear
10 repulae this struggling young author, who
,lung TO him with such pretty simplicity and
Well, the upshot of il all was that the cce-
bated author presently found himself per-
freighted with the poor young be-
sinner. All his mild efforts to unload his
cargo went for nothing He had to give
thA1 'oAhHNit It lhh
to keep on procuring magazine acceptances.
and then revamping the manuscripts to make
them presentable. When the young aspi-
rant got a start at last he rode into sudden
fame by describing the celebrated authors
private lie with such cgustic humOr and
such minutentss of blistering detail that the
ook sold n prodigiOus edition, and broke
the celebrated authors heart with mortiiica-
ton. With his latest gasp he said, ALAS,
the books deceived me ; they do not tell the
whole story. Beware of the struggling young
author. my friends. Whom God sees fit to
starve, let not man presumptuously rcscne to
his own undoing.'
THEGRArEfUL HUSBAND
One daya lady was driving through the
principal street of great city with her little
boy. when the horses took fright and dashed
madly away hurting the coachmnn from his
box and leaving the occupants of the car
riage paralyzed with terror. But brave
youth who was driving n grocery wagon threw
himself before the plunging animals, and
succeeded in arrcsting their flight at the
peril of his own The grateful lady took his
and upon arriving at her home she
related the heroic act to Fer husband (who
Ind read the books), who listened with
eyes TO the moving recital and
who, after returning thanks, III coni junction
with his restored loved ones, TO Him who
suifereth not even Il sparrow TO fall to the
ground unnoticed sent for the brave young
person, and, placing check for $500 in his
hand said Take this as Il reward for your
noble net, William Ferguson, and. If you ever
shall need friend, remember that Thomp-
son McSpadden has II grateful heart. Let
us learn from this that good deed cannot
fail TO benefit the doer. however humble ho
may be.
Seqad William Ferguson called the next
week and asked Mr.. McSpadlen to use his
influence to get him n higher employment.
he feeling capable OF better things than driv-
ing grocers wagon. Mr.. McSpadden got
him au under-clerkship at good salary.
Presently William Fergusons mother fell
sick, and William well, to cut the story
short, MIR. McSpadden consented to take her
into his house Before long she yearned for
the society Other younger children no Mary
and Julia were admitted ulso, and little