The Osceola times., 1878-12-07
FACTS AND FANClES.

Ver9otlOn.
3D.. FACTS AND FANCIES.
SOME young men ought TO carry pede-
meters 70 nee how far they have run In
debt. is lU'a st vfrts.gt
LET ME make the photographs Of .
nation and | care not who. writes their
editorials Boston Traveller.
DON'T be old-fashioned enough to
speak of vebrose man - - gas.h0use."
Refer to him as an electric light gen
orator." :.
Irtstes the man who wants the ofacs
to see the corruption there is In olhcial
circles. The more he sees Of It. the more
anxious he seems to be TO get into It,
els your master upT asked an early
visister of 4 noblemans vslet. "Yes,
sir" answered the valet, with great in
nocenee ;"the butler and carried him
up about three O'Clock"
THE regular troops, % they are r.
cruited, are mainly tramps. A man who
cannot earn 1l2 q month In civil. lie
must be poor business agency for any.
thing. ."- Gen. Hooker. Yi
A TIMnp Bostonian has married alady
whose weight verges closely upon. 700
pounds. "My dear" said he 70 her,
sshsll | help you over the tence r
"No," says she to him, "hslp the fence"
CHANaE cars for, the Garden of
Eden :" "all aboard for Babylon" this
train stops twenty minutes for dinner
at Ninevab, will be familiar cries on the
completion Of the Euphrstes River Val
ley Railroad. Elmira Advertiser.
why u it that five sixths Of mankind
when cutting ogen q slspjack and
| finding roach the rein, instead of feeling
f1ood of pity at the fate Of the animal,
10 around for the cook with slung-shot
up their sleeve Fl Wheeling Leader.
GEORGIA man changed his residence
eight times in eleven months, and tho
last time his wife said she didn't care to
20 TO Heaven, for about the time she got
fixed up and learned where the wafer
was and everything, her husband would
want to move. 'i
Now savsselv from roof to rsof sfrTs
| The pu sy cat Is driven;
| For her there is sweet reposs, n fI
No peace nor quiet g,ven;
She hath no where . lay her head,
| vagrsnts p,ngp do MI 'er.
But soon the sumner-time VIII cone
And bring the csterpiliar.
FUIL-BEARpED grandfather recently
| had his beard shaved off showing clean
face for the first tune for number Of
years. At the dinner table his three.
yesr-old granddaughter noticed II. gazed
with wondering eye, and finally sjacula-
ted. "Grandfathsr, whose head you got
on?" ........
"Drp you attend the church fair last
| night % asked a minister OF one o. the
male members of his congregation. "Yes,
sir,o III didn't see you there" said
sbarp.eyed deacon, II. saw you By the
orter door At closing. up time" swell,
| | attended two oi 'em home."-l Yonkers
Gazette. ...., .. irtrl,.. Fun
| A sottfRREL saw man late in. the fall
without an overcoat. Said he TO Mu.
Souirrel: "Going to be a mild winter
this year Nancy; men 20 without over
coats.ni Moral-It is as easy for the
squirrel to tell what the weather viii b
nv what the man wears, a. tor the man
by what the squirrel. wears.-l bOston
Transcript. -|t....t.,-,.
In China they behesd q physician who
loses n patient. II this custom could bo
introduced in the United States lsrge
number of young men who are now hang.
inc around medical colleges would i'm
mediately turn their attention 70
agriculture or some other useful and
harmless pursuit. .as,.,- i~,e,
MAN with broken nose-'I want .
man arrested in the saloen around the
corner for pounding me-" Police Ser.
geant--" What kind Of looking man was
6e 2" Man w. b N-"A teller with
base hall mcustscte." p S.-"A ha-e
hall m u,,e che VIA 80 ,nn mean ny
that Mr. W i y -"Nne up
side. + New Ymk SUI. 49,,
A LITTLE gr at Heeley Falls Opt,
while s.rsyirg around her tsh'rs a. IN
came acre.. Young bear, And m'stsking
it for dog. ted a string around i'sneck
and lurr,d il houe. 4At Sloneham,
Quebec, fsrg .ht bear was caught m
\ trsp. and hsi aHsciiorT p cpis D,sIy
Asytd her al vsq nv piackihs At h'rw'sh
their teeth in their Ell ley. rs iogsther
away.
Personal: VIII the y ug mar IN
tb,onde oveyc at and liver crOred hat,
Who ssup 9rhs IL Art Bowed Dlwn with
Grease and II iT, out on Wts h,'', Al
a. m please repeat his concert thn even
ing ut tho Aams place, and stanu : hts'e
, way from the laHP-Ps7l ," y suu'ence
can get good crack Il him with q ump
o cal without ene;spgefing he property
of the gss COMPANY? s-sihssa aegS
WHEN on- reads Of Il Laughter and
applaussl' ''tIrmen'e srp'au~J,.
+ "ISansation amc, \ the eidtr etc IN
/ tue rep rte al Pufiter E'w,. e's slum
: rerpons. one. trses TO imagine .s,mi'ar n
: tetlinea,ioisk IN s Lake ferrt q The
> sermon ON Mars Hi. or Aoms at the
] | other grx al di--.s ss,rts o. Apa-'c'ic 'ines
! Hat then. 81 YAnl dldHst st HI
4 | ssee.- f&eesju1sxa usea4 -. ~