The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1878-03-28
OF FAILURES.

- Do tell me, said L, the Othef even
ing, to friend who was reading--bor-
izontalized, man-fashion, on two chairs,
what to write about; something pop
ular; something of public interest"
He stretched himself, put down his
book. looked at me solemnly and grave
". and opened his mouth. | expected
to be overw helmed with the stupendous-
ness of the subject he was about to pro-
pose.
He only said;
Nothing is going on now-except
failures; and of course you don't know
any thing about those " Then he turn
ed to mis- book with an air of having ST.
fenced me SO completely that there was
not the slightest danger of my inter
rupting him second time.
!" We'll. / ought to know something
about failures" thought l, wrathfully.
Il have heard enough about unpaid
dividends, reduced capital stock, exam
iners. receivers, assignees, creditors, as
sets, liabilities, ten. twenty. thirty, for
II cents on the dollar and if l cannot
name correctly all the monetary institu-
lions and mercantile houses that have
failed lately, at least have observed
toe effect of some of those failures.
Why, there is Tom, as nearly angelic
as any man l ever knew-except the
parson-reads the morning paper, gives
his wife snappish answers, hurries away
from the breakfast table, and goes off to
business as cross as the letter Y. Such
behavior on Toms part is so startlinglv
in contrast with his usual placid, un-
ruffied, unny-temperedness, that the
remainder of the family feel their APP
petites quite destroyed and their men
tai and moral bases lettering.
Poor fellow. he must have discov-
cred the notice of another failure" SAYS
his wife. extenuatingly; and she search
es the columns Of the daily. Yes,
here it is. and in his line of business.
too; they probably owe him something "
And Harry comes home and forgets to
Kiss mis- wife and little girl, and says,
when offered the evening papers, that
he Is tired Of reading the papers, that
they have only one thing in them. and
mepe.. and ueglects his hour of prac-
tice at the piano, and says No-with at
least fifty exclamation points after it
when his uife asks if he can spare her
ten dollars 10 90 shopping with the
next day, and remarks that they may
not have = cent 10 live upon in a few
weeks more. for Il Is not unlikely that
the business may close up and he 10
thrown out Of position.
Will. being newly married, does not
grow at bis wife nor forget to kiss her =;
sut he goes about looking prey to
green and yellow melancholy; he
devours the papers. aud can enumerate
every failure that has occurred between
Canada and the Gulf Of Mexico. the At
lantic and Pacific coasts. If he could
regulate matters according 10 his ideas
OF the eternal fitness Of things" he
would terminate all financial difficulties
by a grand " smashup - Just as child
rem always end their stage coach y"
stories: all the failures should happen
at once; and everybody should TAIL /;
then he would inaugurate a plague,
that should destroy one-half the popu-
lation-including all tue lazy, the wick
ed and the children-and having done
that. the other half should recommence
business with fair show in the world.
But. as the Almighty has not made him
q deputy controller in the affairs of this
country, be will probably not have a
chance to " out-Herod Herod. nor to
revise financial matters upon his pecu-
har basis.
Failures will go on; and men will
seotinue to read about them. and growl