Richland beacon., 1878-01-26
no. Cut Ogt For Al Editor.

tors whom be had recently Installed,
in order to give him trial, you
have many Of the characteristics Of q
great journalist. aud have no doubt
that at some time in the remote future
yuu will be capable Of conducting the
London Times; hut, at present some
Of your prculiarilies are of 80 marked
a character ns To destroy much OF your
usefulness in this establishment
Nv hat do you nean!'
why. for instance, | notice that
YOU always spell horse, hoar,e; and
that in spelling Congress YOU invara-
bly, begin with big K. These things
are not So important, perhaps, while
our proof-reaGer maintains CONDITION
of sohrietv. But when YOU speak OF
Herzegovina as a species Of Asla,ic
chicken, and allude 10 is cOnilic; with
Turkey, as if they were two fowls
fighting in barnyard. YOU 90 too far
you trespass upon the good nature
of our readers. You are mistaken
also in alludiDg,o Egypt as the capt.
tai of Germany in asserting that the
Suez Canal runs to Buffalo, and was
built by De Wi,t Clinton. want TO
pass that editorial, to obiige you, but
really im afraid | cant"
well, Pm sorry"
Nov. take that article Of yours
about Cuba. You speak Of Cuba as
being in the Arctic regions, aad You
al!ude to the natives "a living chiefly
ON walrus meat And you seem TO
| think that the American navy is cOn,-
posed of scowS that are propelled by
mules. and that Vice-Ad riral's dujy
/ is To keen his ewes on the mules and
manage the tow-line. They have no
tow-lines in the navy, Mr.. Hockey.
1t is not your fault that you have
never been TO sea but when NAH
undertakes to supply marine intel!i-
gence for d great daily newspaper, he
ought to know that-a quarterback Is
not "A pack of cards which cost a
quarter"
IL didn't say So"
"Iou intimated as much. and | tell
YOU il just drives the public wild.
IL won't do. When you mention
Disraeli as the contemporary Of Moses
aud praise William Cullen Bryant for
The manner in which he wrote the
Acls of The Apostles. you exuose Us
to derision and if Pave printed yorr
article upon the passage of tie Kubi'
con by Galileo jus, after his election
10 The Presidency Of the United States
conveying the idea that the sa d Rub
icon vas law /" prevent negroes
from running of. this ofic'd Il beer
mobbed before night"
The mischief it w.uid !"
"Yes! know have NY fugel
on the public pulse They'll stand 1
good deal. They are patient aud al
that but wnen YOU come at them, fol
instance, with an editorial assertion
that Pe,rarch was one Of The Apos
ties, and that he used TO fish with ;
layout line, in the river Herodotus
they get delirious. Heavens ant
earth. mar Herodo,us was not riv
or he was historian How coult
YOU aiiGGe TO Romeo a. the residence
of the Pope, and declare that th
Ponlil!'s principal cardinals are th'
points uf the compass
: "Blamdf | know J"
well anyway, you see for your
, self that you need years OF study be
fore ycu will tie qualified to for:n pub
lie opinion. No journalist can hop
! to guide the popular mind who teach
D es that the prophet Daniels last nam
was Boone, aud that he hunted COW
, and Indians out in Kentucky no edi
! tor can leave bis mark upon his cer
D tury, who, when be reads in the new
items that The Freuch army has NOV
ed fifteen Kilometres out Of Pari:
writes an editorial asserting that th
army ought to have removed thos
Internal macbires long ago. Ii
stead Of leaving them there to blo'
up the city. ] say no newspape
4 man who does these things, and the
sits down and asks Congress to d
!. something about the tariff, taking tb
:. view that tbe tariff il a tropical fru
some mysterious kind Of banan
for medicinal purposes, can eve
attain the higest rank in his prvfe
sion.'
4 Don't think so, hey!"
u mo. / guess we'll have to par
= I'm sorry, but necessity knows no iav
/. Take my advice, 90 off somewhere ol
e in the country study up, ascertai
that membraneous Group is not II
's crupper of harness, learn tb
- Americas Vespucius was not the tee
e nical name for cabbages; hunt up Il
fact that the Israelites did not sbo
2. quail in the desert with double-ba
ar relied shoi-guns inform yourself tb
Plutarch was not the God OF the
4, fernal regions; discover that the sta
" istics Of the bop crop do no, refer c