The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1878-06-07
Facts and Fancies.
Little drops of water,
Small though they may be.
Make the milkman's fortune
Swell tramandOuslV

MAKE the ml1kIuA0@S fortune
Swell tremendously.
Mines his business-Senator Shar-
on, OF Nevada.
81 declare the convention con-
veaied," said an Iowa chairman.
Holland discounts the American
congress. 1t has 10000 wind-mills.
Gail Hamilton sis a short little
thing as lively as a drumstick, and
dignified."
.'Piety, pomp, music and bonnets"
is the way an eastern paper de-
scribes Easter.
Col. Ingersoll takes it calmly
Exchange. A majority of the Illi-
nois colonies take it straight..-N.
Y. News.
If England wants more Indian fore
es she can take ours. Messrs. S. & J.
Bull would make strong war firm
Chicago Times.
There will be some comfort in
listening TO the photograph; it
can't button-hole you, and its breath
will not be bad.
81 am in love with MYSELF saws
Clara Louise Kellogg. You've got
dead sure thing of it, Clara; No
rivals.-Hawk Eye.
At Rome do ss Romans do; that
is to say, get q hand-organ and a
sore-eyed monkey and sail for
America.-Derrlck.
A county commissioner in Han
cock county, Ohio, worth $4,000,
carried water all day for circus in
order to get in free.
People who attempt to cut boarding
house pie crust with fork, should re-
member that time thrown away can
never be recalled.-Derrick.
Now that one DIR. St. Louis has
been sentenced to be hanged, Chi
cago will have another fit of jeal-
ousy, sure.-New Haven Register.
Proyident minister: sIwish to state
that have procured an alarm clock
that will wake up the congregation
as soon as the service is oVer.'-Harp-
er's Bazaar.
The fact came out in a trial in
San Francisco the other day that a
woman had carried $20,4OO in green
backs in her bustle for nearly six
months.
A conspiracy among the soldiers of
the Persian army was discovered just
before the Sha's recent departure for
Europe, arising from the fast that their
pay was in arrears. A few heads off
settled it.
The Rev. Job Washington, of
Rockport, Maine, ninety-tWo years
of age, has concluded to give up to-
bacco, believing 1T to be injuring
his health. He has used it seventy
eight years.
Hardel, the would-be assassin, s
a "Social Democrat" If it is the
pleasant habit of the "Social Dem
Ocrat" to climb into your lap and
fill you full of lead, give US the "sol-
itary Democrat" That is the kind
we have in Iows.-Hawk Eye.
"There are people who live be-
hind the BILL" is an old German
prOYerb which means that there are
other persons in the world besides
yourself, although you may not see
them.
What is said to be the largest plow
manufactured has just been turned ont
at a factory at Stockton, Cal. The
mold-board is eight feet long, and
the furrow which is cut is thirty-ffve
inches wide. 1t is designed for work
upon the tule lands, and requires
twelve stout oxen to pull it.
A poor woman in Denmark saved
three children from drowning. The
king heard of it and gave her a
medal. We don't know anything
about the valuation of children in
Denmark, but it strikes us that the
act was at least worth q silk over
skirt, with knife plaiting.-Danbury
News.
In the following love couplet there
is great paucity of words, but as
much meaning as there is in many
most moving love songs that have q
fashionable run:
looked and loved, and loved and looked. and
looked and loved again;
But locked and loved, and loved and looked,
and looked and loved in vain.
'I should think there would not be
such q word as breakfast" remark
ed young linguist to his mother,
the other morning "Why, dear ?''
asked she. because, ma" replied
the boy, sit amt natural, things new
or break fsst-they break loose"
There was a sad bewilderment of
expression in the face of that moth
er, as she gazed speechlessly upon
her precious son.
A well dressed, lady-like looking
woman entered q street. oar the 9TH
er day with her little boy. On the
conductors coming to collect the
fare, the lady handed her little son
the half dollar, which he examined
carefully, and then gave it to the
conductor. The man returned the
change, the youngster clapped his
hands and cried: SMamma, mann
ma, he has taken the bad half dol
lar"
This is the way one of the ladies who
belongs TO the Atlantic Monthly's con-
tributors' club remem bers things :
seen. Forrest was buried the day my
new hat came home. Hayes was in
augurated the spring made over my
old silk. Dickens died when Jennie
was baby. Lincoln was killed when
Mary was creeping. The civil war
broke out when Sallie was cutting her
teeth. The king of Spain was born
the yearlI was married.
An ink that cannot be erased ey-