Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1878-02-27

Probably the maddest Clergyman the
world ever saw, was an iinerant Metho-
dist preacher, who ran afoul of Joe Faust,
an African desperate of Denton, Texas.
Faust cooked pistol on the clergyman,
made him get down on his hands and
knees and bleat like a sheep, and compell-
ed him to butt an oak tree until he made
the ucorns fall.
Kew. Royal j. Kellogg, of Wyoming
Conference, and Rev. Melville Young Bo-
ward, of Glenwood, Southeast Indiana
Conference, have been appointed by Bish-
op Haven as missionary reinforcements to
Liberia. The former is to take charge of
the Monrovia Academy, and the latter will
take charge of our new mission in Bopora.
Both are we'll qualified for the work, and
will leave in II few weeks for Liberia.
There's nothing to exceed the diabolcal
satisfaction man will take in announcing
to his wife, after he has got his shirt on,
that there is u button missing, and the
keen delight he feels in seeing her dance
around the room after a needle and thread,
while she listens to II lecture on careless
ness, approaches ecstasy. But look out
when she gels that button on, bites the
thread off with snap and commences
There now"
A tramp walked into Third street bank
yesterday, and, stepping up to the counter,
said, May | ask question, sr?" ''Yes.
but be quick about it,, replied the clerk.
IL want to know if all the greenbacks
have been retired from the circulation"
said the tramp, with very anxious air.
" Oh, no." replied the clerk, there are
about 45O millions of them yet Thanks,
thanks, said the man with visible emotion.
- You take load off my mind. 1t is so
long since l have seen one that | was
afraid they had all been RETIRED" and then
he slowly retired himself.
The Hum OF INDUSTRY Two men and
boy were walking along John R., street
Yesterday, when one of thcm-the father
of the boy-said:
How pleasant to my ears is this hum
of industry
$50 it is to mine," replied the other,
and when the boy got n chance he asked:
Father, did you mean that pounding
back there?"
Yes, my son." was the answer.
That evening rs the father was seated in
his evening chair he heard an awful
pounding in the kitchen, and rushed in to
see his son belaboring Il chair with ham
| mer.
"What on earth does this mean9" he
shreked at the lad.
1.-The hum of industry, father" was the
pleasant reply.
The boy was hummed out o that so fast
that it was over an honr before he could
compose himself to softly inquire of his
inner consciousness: "Was father lying
to that man, or is night bad time for the
hum of industry ?'-DetroH Free Press.
BUSTED IN BUSINESS The other evening
a very polite darkey made his bow to one
of the desks editorial, with hat in hand,
and the propitiatory remark:
know it's kind O. cheeky to ask it of n
) stranger, but de fack am, I'm busted in
business; had to sign ober, sab; can't pay
two cents on de dollar.
| Is that so? I'm sorry to hear Of it.
hope your creditors are satisfied.
To be suah! Dey's all right. It's me
: dat's suilerin' mus 90 fru de bankrupt
cy court. De fack is, want you to ad-
r vance me the capital to set in business
f again.
: What is your business9
Ise a jobber and whitewasher' sab. lse
= been doin smashin business.
4 Well, how much capital will it require
f to set you up in business againo
Thiry-soven and n half cents, sab.
+ This proved too much to be resisted
i The capital was furnished then and there
d and if it didn't set up that mercantile son
: of Africa in less than twenty minutes, we
e made mistake in estimating his business
+ tendency.