The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-06-22
At the Central Station Court.

NATURE put pug nose on John
Scott and stopped his growth at five
feet. Then she tinkered at his face
until it should look as if the owner had
just bitten into lemon, and went off
carrying most of his hair along in her
hand. When the bald-headed little
man stood before the bar of justice it
was plain that he meant to find fault,
and it was only a second before he said:
81 want to see the law that says you
can try a prisoner on an empty stom-
achr'
His Honor wiped off his chin in q re-
Elective way, looked over the desk, and
replied:
''Boy! can give you law by the sec
ton, page, pound or ton, but the law
can wait for a person to eat his break
FAST
"Boyn' echoed the prisoner, "who's
aboy? l am over forty years old, sirn'
The Court bent further over the desk
to get a better view, and when he sank
back in his chair and carefully worked
the stone out of an Egyptian date he
seemed satisfied that the prisoner was
right. That bald head settled the ques-
ton.
John Scott wouldn't pay his fare on
street car because the car wasn't
painted blue. When put off, he hunted
up a saloon, but refused to pay for his
drink because the bartender didn't re-
semble the poet Milton. When ar
rested he found fault because the officer
didn't wear a gold watch, and, though
locked up in the bridal cell, he didn't
like the pattern of the Brussels carpet,
the pose of the center-t table, nor the
way Bijah had slanted up the pillow
shamS.
The Court leaned over the desk again
to see if the prisoner was still there, and
then said:
81 suppose you put in a plea of
guilty?'
Z" No, I don'tn' exclaimed the little
man, bobbing his bald head around.
. refuse to plead at all, do! | want
that policeman to call a carriage and
return me to the very spot on which he
arrested me!''
In thirty days you will come OUT
said His Honor, as he picked up COM
mitment
"Does this court dare to sentence me
to felon's cell without further proof
than this officers storyr' screamed
John.
"She thinks she doesr' was the SOL
emn reply.
Il want some lawyers and witness
esq hOwled the little man. want an
adjournment-I want breakfast! Twill
never enter a bastile, sir-never-nev-
err'
Thirty days, and by that time the
first watermelons will be here" unused
the Court.
81 won't have no watermelons, sir
| won't even look at them!" persisted
the wicked prisoner.
"Come, birdie, come" said Bijah, in
response to nod from the desk.
The little man wouldn't.
"Come in and I'll tell you bear
storyr' whispered Bijah.
The little man was ready to die first
"Well, you know, once there was a
bear with about sixteen feet depth of
hold" said the old man, as he picked
up the little bald-head in his arms,
and he used to stay out late atnights,
cuff the children around when he got
home, and twit his patient wife with
having broken her leg while sliding off
hay-stack. Well, as time went on
| on-on-h
The audience could hear no more
nothing more but the yelps and yells of
the prisoner, who was carried along as
mother carries babe. When the
omnibus came around Mr.. Scott OBJ
jected to taking ride because the We
hicle didn't have blue-glass windows,
but he was gently lifted in and tied to
Il seat by his oat-tails.-DetroH Free
Press