The Osceola times., 1878-06-22
FACTS AND FANClRS.

WHEN you find man who claws over
all Of the papers on the desk, looks
through the drawers, searches every
pocket in his clothes, and explores the
regions above his ears In search of his
lead pencil, and finally finds 1t betwesn
his teeth, don't lend him money--he il
absent minded. Keokuk Constitution.
A Coal Hop OF SnvER--Silver IL %
plenty in Hartford, Connecticut, that ct
a recent circus performance there almost
all the money talen in was of that metal
The circus company's treasurer had bill
Of $400 TO pay a railroad company for
transportation and rent the sum In .
coal hod.
A CELEBRATED actress, whose frsh
smile and silver voice favored the decep.
ton, always called herself "sweet eix-
teep." She stated her age a. sixteen in
court as witnesr. Her son was directly
sfterward called up and asksd how old
he wG "Six months older than
mother" WAS the honest reply.
A TRIUMPH FOR 1NsTINCT.-Says the
St. Louis Journal: When . man casual
ly sits down on lowly humble bees
nest, reason urges him to cit there till
be has squashed the animation out Of tho
vindictive occupant, but instinct warns
him to keep an important engagement
elsewhere. This Ia one Of those engage
ments when instinct invariably gets the
better Of reason.
GIVING 'EM FRS by An error Of the
press, the London Eclectic Review was
advertised the other day a. the Epilep.
tic Review, and on inquiry for 1t at 2
booksellers shop the bibliopole replied
that be knew Of no periodical called the
Epileptic Review, though there might b.
such . publication coming out BY hm
and starts.- London Advertiser.
WHEN this happy.eo lucky old world
is l2s, ,000, 900 years old, absat twice .
week the newspapers will chronicle the
sorrows Of another father and mother
who locked their children in the house,
and then went visiting, returning 10 6nd
the house In ashes. And, hy the way,
the children also.--( Hawkeye.
WILL BE OvERwoRKKD.-says the
Hawkeye: The rice crop in the Phil.
lippine Islands this year is . total failure.
This IL depressing news 10 the boarder,
who. remembering how little rice IL takes
to make Ave gallons Of soup when crops
are abundant, will trenbls 70 think Of
the amount OF overwork that VIII b
forced upon one grain now.
THE LAND OF OPHIR.-Capt. Burton
believes that be has discovered the bib
lical Ophir in indian. He has brought
back from bis recent expedition twenty
Eve tons Of specimens, including ali the
valuable metals. turquoise, slabaster
and sulphur. Everywhere he found
traces of old mining operations, abund.
ant indications Of gold, and silver quarts
which readily yielded fifteen per centum
Of silver.
AN editorial writer on the New York
Express says: 1--WE are all too busy to
read In column what we might read In
q paragraph. The man or men who
would make successful newspaper to-
day are taught for their frst lesson the
great secret Of conciseness and ccndensA-
ton. The man who can turn bright
paragraph IL more read than the essayist
who writes learned articles, q column
long, for the London Timee."
A FLArrEBrNs TEsrIMoNIAL.-.An
obliging gentleman who thinks that per.
sonsl favors do not cost much, while they
make friends, was applied to BY negro
for q certificate Of character, by which
he might get situation. The testimo-
nial proving TO be more complimentary
than Scip1o himself expected, that wor'
thy, on recovering from his astonishment,
exclaimed: Say, Mr.. -, won't ysu
glib me something to do yourself on dat
recommendation
AN IsLAHDIN DANGER Toronto
Telegram says: In the event OF war
Prince Edwasd Island would be In great
danger from Russian cruisers. All they
would require to do would be to tie .
hawser 10 the island and tow II out into
the ocesn. This would seem 70 show
the desirability Of the government TAX
ing Prince Edward Island In every night
until all danger disappears.
The sad fate Of Charley Ross has not
been in vain. Mr.. Ross has examined
497 unknown and friendiess waits In his
search for the lost boy. More than 800
OF these boys, who had been drifting
homeless over the face OF the earth, are
now provided with comfortable homes
through the publicity given their Gases
by being mistaken for Charlie Ross.
TowINe BY SUB.MARIEE CABLB-A
| Leipsic journal states that the remarka.
BILE success attending the novel system
of river navigation. introduced for near
ly the whole length OF the Elbe river, OF
towing boats by the aid Of chain sub
merged in the channel. has led to its In
PRODUCTION upon all the tributaries Of
that river.
TEE woman who found her board in
the Stewart hotel, finds her bard In the
Graphic. Thus be sings for her:
| am msnarch Of all survey;
Ny right there 10 none 70 dispute
speak and my misions obey,
but long for masculine brute,
30 called.
O. ." oli,u ie's charm" that the pen
| OF the pos Ia have warbled nbouti
1 Better live in = hovel with men
Than we'll In palace without
any.
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