The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1878-06-28
+" BILL ARP
An Old Time Humorist Re-appears- What
He Knows About Farming.

I roi i'A' ~ ~ VI w. = -
They are nifty clever and kind, but
when | ax 'em about this thing and
that thing, ] eau see a suppressed
smile a playim' around asthU it was
amusin' how little | knewd. You
see this is my tust year in the bis
ness, aud all my late friends who
kindly predicted that me and my
folks would perish TO death by the
fust day of June, has been watchin'
me afur off, and they are somewhat
disappointed. We did run alarming
~ short of vittcls that's Il fact,
and reckon they heard of it, for
we haven't been afflicted with com.
pany TO any extent. We've had Il
hard time of it this spring, shore.
Sweet prospects, sweet birds and
sweet flowers was all around us, but
we couldn't eat 'ein. Sorter like
that Teller who writ about water
water everywhere but not a drop
to drink.
But like farmin' nevertheless
It's an honest, quiet life, and it does
me so much good to work and git
all over in Il SWEET of perSpiration.
| enjoy my umble food and my re-
pose, and get up every mornin' re-
newcd and rejuvenated like an
eagle in his flight, OF words to that
effect. | know / shall like it more
and more, for we have already
passed over the RubyCon and are
bcginnin' to reap the rewards Of in
dustry. Spring chickens have got
ripe and the hens keep bloomin' on.
Over 200 now respond to my old
'onan'S call every mOrnin' as she
totes around the bread-tray a sing
in teheeky, teheeky. ! tell you
she watches those birds close for
she knows the value of 'tm. She
al raised a Meth0ditt, she was,
and many II time has watched
though the crack of the door sadly,
and scen the preachers helped to
to the last gizzard in the dish.
There vas "a chickens, / ducks, 3
goSlinS, II turkeys and Z pigs,
hatched out last week, and Daisey
had a calf and Molly IA colt besides.
This looks like bismeSS, don't it
This Is what | call successful farm
n'-multiplying and replenishing
according to Scripter. Then we
nave a plenty OF peas and potatoes
md other garden verbs, which help
poor man out, and by the 4th Of i
July will have wheat bread and
'iskit and blackberry pies and pass
regular declaration OF indcpcnd.
nee.
Speakin' of p~Otatocs-let me tell
how my Majors watched me.
lie and the boys was Il workIn'
way in a patch Of rich mellow new
round down in the bottom, and a
abor called and says he, what
calculatin' on plantin here 4"
Potatoes" says |. "Gwine to
liant all this in potatoes 7" says he.
Yes" says /, "and more too. |
'ould plant ten acres if | had the
eed." Pretty Don it was narrated
over the settlement that | was =
lnnlu nothin' but potatoes on my
and it got to Rome that | had
II barrels and was still at
when the Teller left. And so my
tie friends shook their heads
knowingly and remarked, 81 told
Oh so. He don't know that horses
nj hogs can't live without corn
Well. | hay planted about ten
lShelS in the fresh, loose soil on
creek and nobody ever saw finer :.
les or more Of 'em to the quantity. :
plant 'em in the dark of the 4
DON, either. Let the lunaticS put y
at III their pipes and smoke it.
ne of my nabors WON'T lay the
Drm of u fence unless the moon is n
st right, and another says he no.
ED for 40 years that it's nifty apt Pl
rain sometime within three or al
nr days before or after the moon -
larters. "JcSSo," says |, "Jcsso." Il
But they do git the joke on me,
metimeS, and | sorter blame YOU
til it, Mr.. Editur, for you see Pm p,
lmin' acCordin' to your schedule,
Il yOu dOn'tmake things exactly
minous. Fur instance, You said
at cotton seed was an excellent eq
r~tilizer. Well, | had 'em and as We
ey was a clean, nice thing to w
ndle, put 'em under most every ST.
ing in my garden. | was arun. co.
n inyun sets heavy, and one u,
)rnin went out to peruse 'em and f.,
saw the straight track of a big
Die under 0very row. lie had jist n
Sted 'em all up about three inches. Il
hadn't eat nary one, and thinks
o myself he's just goin' around a l.
.elling of 'em. Next mornin' all or
: sets was a settin' about six sit
up with air right on top of we
thickcst stand of cotton You ho,
er did zee. Now, if you had told
about spilin' of 'em as my nobors
| it before we used 'em, it would =
We been more luminous. Howso- ~
II, / knitted 'em down and set the w
back again, and nobody ,
U got "a finer crop. son
speaking of cotton seed reminds 1
to tell you and your readers mo
t the finest cabbages | ever saw Low
one of my nabors last fall, and i
said he always planted 'em over I
iouble handful of spilt'd cotton Liz
d, and he hadn't failed to makea 7
I'd crop in ten years. 1t any of =
If readers don't know how to
le 'em, let 'em TX Harris. lie orl
lts somebody to ax him some
10 hard Rat ba lnnft know ,nV