Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1878-03-30

" The jig's up were the last words Of
the man who died Of st. VituSs dance.
ONE hundred years ago this month
Washington remarked The work of
sand. .papering the fly specks from last
years maple sugar has begun,"-I OIL
City Derrick.
The Mediterranean has sunk one.
third of an inch since the opening Of the
Suez canal. We knew it mad sunk, but
didn't think it had gone down like that.
-[Danbury News,
A CLoTHIER has excited public curl
osity by having large apple painted on
his sign When asked for an explana.
tiop, he inquired, f. If it hadn't been
for an apple, where would the ready
made clothing stores be to-day"
A CANDID Kentucky editor advances
the suggestion that special tax Of five
dollars on each pistol owned in the state
would beat the bell-punch plan for tax>
alton all hollow. He wants to tax 'em
by the barrel, instead of by the drink.
THEintelligent compositor who quoted
the Rev. Talmage as saying "An honest
man is the nobbest work of God " now
lies stiff and stark in the dank church
yard mold, and the daisies are growing
all around, all around, and the daisies
are growing all around.
HERE is what was sung recently at n
religious meeting Of cOlored men;
q II YOU see Peter asleep at de gate,
KaEe ue night befo he was up 30 late.
You needn't 'Bpect with your lead OBJ sin,
Dat you'll sip past him and steal right in;
De angels always acts on dc squar';
Dey know you here and dey y'llknow you dar."
WE don't know a more desolate lone,
some, frieHdless condition for poor fallen
humanity to fail into than to be an old
married man, waiting to see an old col
lege friend, in parlOr where the!old col
lege friends youngest daughter and
drug clerk are wanting to crawl into the
same rocking chair, and talk lOvey lOvey
ad noaseam- Burlington Hswkeye.
AND now comes the spring opening"
when the khedive OF Egypt FIRST looks
at his nine hundred brevet wives, then at
his pocketbOok, and then looks around
for an opening to spring into. AT least,
we suspect he does. That is the way We
should feel about it Nine hundred new
spring bonnets at 50 per bonnet, would
make a frightful chasm in our years
salary [-Norristown Herald
"HER large, limpid, lustrous eyes filled
with big, biilowy tears, Lurline leaned
over the dying auctioneer's pillow.
'Lurline,' be sighed. feebly. AYE
Alonzo,' she answered. Lurliue,' he
said, meet mein the sweet buy .and.buy"
His breath came fainter and with more
difficulty. In moment more he WIS
/ going, going, gonel He is dead said
the doctor. Yes, be has gone, absolutely
and without reserve sObbed his wife"
DO you know what it is to the minisN
ter to have man.of.war visit his post?
First, the admiral sends his staff officer
to report his arrival Then they take
drink. Then the admiral calls on the
minister with his staff and all their good
clothes. Then they all drink, Then the
minister goes aboard the man.of-war in
his GOOD clothes and in the admirats
yawL. Then they all drink. Then the
admiral comes ashore with his staff, and
the minister takes him to call on his
msiesty's government. Then we take
drink. Then the admiral invites the
minister 10 lunch, and they take adrink'
Il Comfy.