The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1878-11-05
THE WIDOW THORN.

~ In Jne WOrlu - Always smlllnB, al
ways fresh, plump, and deep in her for
ties-one of the kind who smooth their
aprons down while they talk to you.-
Then the little cigar shop at the corner
she which kept,and where she ratified on
about different brands of tobacco, and
talked of the weather to her customers,
and the kindness which any tale of sor-
row told by vagrants called forth from
her--the many times her fat little hands
went into the drawer for change to be
bestowed on some charitable plea = all
went to make up the best tempered, the
most motherly and the incest little
woman you would ever chance to
meet.
So thought DR.. Ash, who lived next
door, and who often went in for little
snuff, you know but who invariably set
tied his wig more rakishly before pop
ping into the shop. He used to say to
her:
"My you must be lonely here, Widow
Thorn ~
"Oh not at all, sir, thanking you'll"
she would reply.
wonder you never married sec
ond time, Widow Thorn ~
Well, it is wonder, ism it doctor
But you see, I'm such queer old body
that 1 guess not many could fancy
me-"
Madam, there you must stopl /
cannot hear the divine sex disparaged,"
returned the doctor He was, as they
say, of the old school.
She laughed.
Cant woman speak against her.
self?" she asked
mo She never speaks against her.
self unless she means to flatter herself
by contradictory disparagement when
some one is by"
"Sir, you are too plain"
"Widow Thorn, was always called
plain, and this wigs too big for me-"
Then she laughed at him; and what
promised to be quarrel ended in mer-
ry Good-by."
Then there was the baker at the cor
ner. He was widower, and he used to
come in of an evening for chat and
cheap cigar.
Said he: "This lonely state is miser-
able, inst it ?"
"Do you speak from experience ?"
asked she.
eyes my Maria's been dead fourteen
years." said he.
{" / shouldn't think it would take so
long time for you men to forget any
thing" she said.
All, ma'am Man is wonderful
being - the most wonderful of Gods
creatures -
Except Woman,' said she.
YOU'RE right, widow And that's
the reason the Lord meant that every
man should have a wife and every
woman husband, just to make them
equal. So think you and must have
new partners"
"Now, look here, Mr.. Johns You
have had your partner, and 1 have had
mine, and death has dissolved the part
nership. Now we'er both bankrupt, and
we can't carry on a joint business so
we must go on pleasantly" she said and
bade him Goodnight l''-
He had to laugh, too, because she SEEM
ed to expect him to do nothing else.
Then there was the old bachelor over
the way who was learning the bassoon.
He used to come to the window of sum-
mer evenings, when the widow was
at her door for a breath of
fresh air, and he would blow at "The
Last Link is Broken % till it was o
wonder he did not rupture something
and die. He did not smoke, nor drink,
nor chew. But brilliant idea struck
him one day, and over he went.
Do you keep paper collars, ma 'am ?"
he asked tremblingly.
Yes, sir" she answered, smoothing
her apron down.
"Give me some" he said, vaguely.
What size ?"
cob any size II don't care.''
Don't you know your number?''
No, ma'am ! But L don't care |
much.
"Lud - she calculated. "Here, sir.
Just you take your collar off, and let me
it,"
So he did, and she handed him an
other.
"That'll fit you, sir" she said.
Then he tried to put it on, and his
hand trembled so that he broke one of |