The weekly clarion., 1878-04-24

Progress of the Great Temper
ance Wave,
Address Of Fleet H. Cooper Esq
DELIVERED BEFORE A TEMPERANCE Mass
MEETING IN THE HALL OF THE HOUSE OF
REPRESENTATIVE MONDAY NIGHT Arm
J., 1873.
Whiskey is big Monster for an humble
individual like me to tackle. Neverthe
less. have mIda up my mind to grlpple
with him for while
In dissolving my relationship with my
friends, the saloon men, desire to bear my
testimony TO the able manner in which
they have discharged the functions of
the5s office and the courteous and polite
treatment they have uniformly ace prded to
me. Tney always met me smjlingly, wait
ed on me with cheerful alacrty, and hand
ell me back the proper chlnge with COM
mendable exuetitude. They rarely ever
made mistake in favor of them selves, ana
still more rarely against thems lives. They
are correct people financially anl honest as
20 money. For the most part they are very
good looking men and generous hearted
:
aud cleanliness of person they enjoy mo-
nopoly of the blue ribbon over any other
class of men.
If was pajnte~ and wanted a model for
an Adonis, l would look for him il a New
Orleans bar room. Go into any irst-class
saloon Of that or any other city, tor all OF
them have their Adonises, and gaze upon
the lovely young professor b hind the bar.
HeiS cleauly shaved and exquisitely per-
tuned There isn't speck Of grease. or
dust or dirt upon any of his fine clothes
His finger nails are pared with perfect pre-
cision Ills hatr Is curly aud glossy, sweet
" oiled, and generally parted in the mid
die. tUnles9 he happens to b. blrefo 'ted
ON the top Of his head, like a No loc CJm =
mssioner.j His linen is OF the finest and
whitest OF material, and always looks as if
At had Just come trom the laundry. HIS
shirt collar has stylish set. an his cravat
is ornamented with II small diam md pin
and is never out Of place. His strong point
IS ia the departm at Of the cravat. fany-
Ching should happen u that there wouid be
misery deep aud profound in his soul. His
boots are polished brightly. His hands are
As soft and tender as Il m4jden's How
upon a lovelyc 'eature like this. Aud then
mark his proficiency in the science of mix
ology. He is an adept in the handling of
glasses lie can take Il light tippler and
slide it over the marble counter from one
END 10 he other or make it stop in the
aniddle just as he pleases withou. turning it
over or breaking it, There il dignity and
system and poetry, an1 grandeur in all his
movements As lac goes through the intricate
formula of the American punch, or the sub
lime coneoction of the arisJocratie brandy
smash. lie does things almost in twink
ling. aud yet lac doHt seem to be in hurry
Such excellence deserves homage, and i
is not for me to cry it down. 1t amt hin
that l am now about to open hostilitiei
upon.
between the saloon men and me there ha:
ALWAYS been friendship and good feeling
and 1 don't want to disturb this relation.
hope nav action viii have no serious efec;
upon the price OF drinks. l am willing K
admit, for the sake % The argument, that th'
saloon men are human hetpgs like the res
q of us. In fighting whiskey aud nsary an6
the devil, draw 4 liue of dem0rkStion be-
tween these great agencies OF wicke1 1hesi
and the men who seem to be temporarily
allied 70 them-between the business and
the men. Circumstances of trade may
cause men to lend money at usurious rates
of interest who are not ShylOcks; evil asso
Citations induce men to sin sometimes wht
despise:the regular business of SHINING; anC
necessity not unfreq uently forces men Il
sell whisky who are at heart not hostile tt
temperance. As L understand it Murphy
isM is a crusade against the business, moi
the men who may happen TO be engaged in
it. with malice towards none, and charity
for ALL" the Grand Murphy army are sweep
ing forward in their great work.
By the term Whisky, in its com prehensive
aggregation of definition, wish to be un-
derstood as covering all intoxicating fluids
now in use. When use the word Whisky
therefore, in a general way, intend to give
it n tremendous quantity of meaning
Strictly speaking, whisky is sort of pie
bian kinsman in the family of intoxicants
Brandy is his elder brother, and disposed te
put on superior airs, but in point of fact Il
less worthy of trust and confidence. His
other full brothers are gin and rum. ALI
and beer and porter are his poor country
cousins, and they are frOthy and fiably
hardly able to storm an iron clad stomach
Then there are his aristocratic relations
who assume lordly styles, and wear foreigi
and unpronounceable titles, generally
known in this country under the head 0
wine. Some of them are proud, naughty
costly, brilliant and sparkling, but they al
tend to the same goal-the inevitable gut
ter. Then there is a kind of mule whisky
"a half brother to whisky-half whisky
and half water, with some foreign ingre
Iient mixed in to disguise the water. Thi
BONES to us under various brands of 'tStOm
Ach Bitters.'' The American stomach mus
be in wretched state of Decentralization i
ehere Ia any actual need for the Thousand
pnd one different preparations which flOa
through the land under the name of Stom
Ach Bitters. If there is a revolution in tn
nachiDery Of the American stomach, nj
Impression ID, these StOmac b Bltters hav
helped 70 create IL, and are largely respon
ib1e for It.