St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1878-12-13
Dron Blunders.

IL 10 IL vi II SSIiCS vi pa
pers and letters sent to the Glasgow
Herald, and well repays perusal. We
give a few extracts from it.
AS specimens of typographical errors,
there are amongst others the following !:
By the insertion of one letter in place
of another, a newspaper, not long since
reporting the danger that an express
train had run, in consequence of COW
getting upon the line, said: GAS the
safest way, the engineer put on full
steam, dashed up against the COW, and
literally cut it into cdIUes ~
Never perhaps was the word ''austere"
more miscOnstrued than in the instance
of clergyman in Lancashire who got il
wholesome warning in regard to pulpit
articulation, by discovering in one
house which he visited the day after
preaching from Luke xix. 81, that the
servant had gone home with the i'm
preston that his text had been, ~
feared thee, because thou art an oyster
man!n
The stories told of the blunders made
by Oxford and Cambridge undergrldu-
ates in the Scripture examination, are
almost incredible. One of these, when
asked who was the first king of Israel
was so fortunate as to stumble upon the
name of "Saul." He saw that he had
hit the mark, and wishing to show the
examiners how intimate his knowledge
of the Scriptures was, added cOnfden-
tally: "Saul, often called Paul" An
other was asked to give the parable OF
the good Samaritan. He did so with
tolerable accuracy till he came to the
place where the Samaritan says to the
inn-keeper: "When | come again will
repay thee" Here the unlucky examI-
nee added: "This he said, knowing he
should see his face no more !"
1t is told of IL certain Glasgow baiiie
that, when visiting Paris as one of a
deputation from Glasgow to Louis
Philippe, the king said, when showing
the party through his library, where he
had many of the English classics "You
will know Milton very well ?"-"Oh.
bless you, yes bless you, yes" said the
bailie cheerfuIy, delighted that some
thing had been mentioned that he did
know. Eyes, your majesty, l know
Milton very well" Milton is a little
place in the ueighbOrhoOd of Glasgow;
"we're just building slaughter houses
there"
BY the bad arrangement of clauses in
composition, iudicr0us blunders are
sometimes made. A Wisconsin paper
announced that the Board of Education
had "Iesolved to erect a building large
enough to accommodate five hundred
students three stories high" In an
English paper an advertisement ap-
peared, under the heading of "To Let,
ii house for family in good repair
| Dnn.I .,nEa1 fhic nnI !, -
"a family in good repair" must mean
one in which none of the members were
crack 1.-THE brooches would have
been sent before but have been unwell. =
was note of apology sent to dean Al
ford by his jeweller and "Two sisters
want washing" was an advertisement
which appeared in the Manchester
Guardian.
An amusing style of blunder is the
''bulI" for which the Irish get most
credit 1t was an Irish editor that ex-
claimed, when speaking of the wrongs
of his country: "Her cup of misery has
been OVERLOOKING, and is not yet full =
!; 1t was an Irish newspaper that said
of RObespierre that "He left no children
behind him, except brother, who Wis
killed at the same time."-Irish alsu
was the cOrnet who, when writing home
from India praising the much-abused
climate as really one of the best under
the sun, added: "But lot of young
fellows come out here, and they drink
and they eat, and they eat and they
drink, and they die; and then they
write home to their friends, saying il
was the climate that did it ~
A story of Dean Ramsay's is given o
half cracked man in the parish kirk
: of "Auld Ayr" who got his head in be-
, tween the iron rails in front of a seat
and startled the congregation by crying
} out in the middle of the sermon
J Murder, murder my head will have
to be cuttit aft. Holy minister o my
head maun be cuttit aft. It's a judg
, ment for leaving my godly Mr.. PEBBLES
This former minister) at the Newton.
When he had been extricated and qui
eted, and was asked why he put hi
5 head there, he said: ''It was juist t.
look OH wi another WOmdR."
Amongst the instances of blunder
: from absence of mind are the following
A clergyman, walking one day in til,
! country fell into thought. He was $,
5 accustomed to ride that when he fount
himself at a toll, he stopped and shout
, ed to the man "Here! what's to pay {?
''Pay for what ?" asked the man.
: ''For my horse" said the clergyman.
"What horse There's no horse, sir |!
7 ''Bless mem exclaimed the clergy
man, looking down between his legs
81 thought l was on horseback ~
The first Lord Lyttleton was yer,
absent. 1t was declared of him tha
: when he fell into the river by the up
setting of a boat at Hagley, che sanl
twice before he recollected that h
could swim."-A New York paper give
D the following story in illustration of tn
Observation-Disclosures of the great iona
e than Edwards. When out riding on
day, little boy very respectfully bow
ed and opened the gate for hin
.'Whose boy are you, my little man
he asked. ''Noah Clark's boy, sir.
: was the answer. On the return of Ed
= wards, the same boy appeared an
opened the gate for him. He thanke
| the little fellow, and again asked
'Whose boy are you ?"-"Noah Clark
sir; the same mans boy was quar-
ter of an hour ago, sirn
Some blunders arise from misappre
hensiOn. A bishop of Oxford sent roun
to the church wardens in his diocese
circular of inquiries, including the ques
ton: "DOes your officiating clergyma
:. preach the gospel, and is his conversa
7 ton and carriage consistent Herewith ?
The church warden of Wallingfoi
: replied: "He breaches the gospel, bu
e does not keep carriage"
A doctor, who had one day allowe
+, himself to drink too much, was sent fo
e to see fashionable lady who was all
ing. He sat down by the bedside, too
| nnt his match aud kooo, -