Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1878-01-04
The Stone Giant VI Colorado.

People like to be humbugged" So,
at least, it seems. They will give more,
any time, for the privilege of staring in
stupid wonder at even the most clumsy
and awkward of deceptions. than for the
opportunity Of obtaining reliable knowl-
edge Barnum discovered that long ago
and has been turning the discovery to
practical account ever since. Lesser
lights in the world of humbug revolve
in orbits more OF less distant from the
greater luminary, and as result of their
influence we have the country swept
periodically with some vicious delusion.
Moon hoaxes, blue glass, and stone
giants are becoming alarmingly frequent.
The last venture in the weli-trodden
fields of discovery was made in Colora-
do. A veritable giant-a petrifed giant
at that-was recently unearthed near
Colorado Springs. This giant had, mad
vertently, permitted the toes of one foot
to remain uncovered, and his place of
concealment was betrayed to the sharp
eyes of one who has ''fondness for col
lecting curious stones and petrlfactlons. -
The giant might have known better.
But then he is no worse off than all the
other petrifed giants. 1t is just their
luck always to be discovered. Let them
hide in the most out-of -the-way place
imaginable, and some collector of pet
rifactions will go straight to the spot.
Some people have an instinct for finding
petrified giants.
The Colorado specimen is little
unique in its way. 1t seeems to possess
some advantage over its petritied breth-
ren. The foot-it has only one perfect
foot-resembles a monkeys, 'and the
extension of the lower end of the back
bone for some four inches makes it look
like tail" 1t is true the doctors are
inclined to take the conceit out of this
last appendage by gravely saying that
"the tail was formed by the shrinking of
the flesh at the end of the backbone be-
fore the process of petrifaction began,
but people are inclined to doubt the
wisdom or the authority of any such
doctors.
Seriously, have we not had enough OF
petrifed monsters for awhile? 1t is
certainly sufficient that we all-ever
those who set up a claim, founded on
college diplomas or something, to having
sort of patent on the intelligence OF
the country-should join in the pernic
ious practice of discovering petrifeG
specimens of such things as crab apples
bacon, shoes, corn cobs, wasps nests
dogs heads, human hands, and all other
impossible petrifactions that nature ol
science or common sense never heard OF
There is probably no way to stop the
discovery of such common petrifactions
at present, and the vice is likely to pro
ceed until some little knowledge of tht
world we live in, shall be regarded as ;
criterion of intelligence. But petrifiet
giants ought to have rest. We profess
in the name of all that is true and posi-
BILE against the finding of any more O
them for whole generation at least
We never took kindly to petrified giant
of any kind, but petriied giants witt
tails are something that we particular.
abhor. We must insist in the name o
outraged anatomy, that if men will per
sist in discovering petritied giants, tina
the tail be omitted before the "discov
cry is made. It's omission will brin
the claim for genuineness a little NOR
in accordance with what is true or pos
sible Next we advise them to omit tn
giant A petrifed man of five fee
ten, is as great tax upon our credulit
as we are willing to stand. Under YER
peculiar and pressing circumstances W
might consent to six feet, but we mus
draw the line somewhere. While ou
hand is in, we would, with becomin
modesty, extend more advice, and say t
those who plan and execute the mex
discovery, that if they would give eve
color Of probability to their CLAIM
\ they must omit the Spetrifed" too, III
less indeed they are willing TO apply th
term to q mass Of empty bones. Th