The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1878-02-02
All Sorts.


ing.
When man calls you liar, take
him by the hand and call him q
gentleman.
Geese having feathers to shed
should not prepare to shed them
now.
Troubles are like dogs; the email
Ter they are the more they annoy
you.
There would be less scepticism
it mems hearts were as pure as the
evidences of religion are clear.
A Frenchman, intending to COM
pliment a young lady, by calling
her a gentle lamb, said, "She is one
mutton as is small !"
Somebody advertises prepare
ton for keeping a lady's hands free
nom chaps. A report that she has
no money would do the same thing.
The difference between a tale
bearer and sealing-wax is, sealing
wax burns to keep secret, and
the tale-besrer burns to tell one.
"Jemim&, said fashionable miss
TO her friend, II think Charley Potts
is perfectly splendid; he can get on
my gloves, and wear spit-curls.
There ia q Connecticut widower
who declares that nothing reminds
him of his poor, dear wife so much
as to live within earshdt of . saw
mill.
"What would you be, If i should
press the stamp Of love upon those
sealing-wax lipsf" Il. responded
the fairy-like creature, should be
stationery T.
One by one the roses fade. 1t
is now boldly denied that men who
wear long hair are possessed of
any more talent than men who
have it shipped close.
1t is in vain to hope to please all
alike. Let a man stand with his
face in what direction he will, he
must necessarily turn his back on
the world.
A Springfield man recently took
q bath in tho dark. He managed
well enough, only he got hold Of
q piece of stove-blacking instead Of
soap, with marked results.
A poor young man remarks that
the only advice he gets from capi-
talists is''to live within his income"
whereas, the difficulty he experien-
ces is to live without an income.
A small boy in New Haven made
} sensation for, q short time by
quietly transferring . card bearing
the words take one," from q lot
Of handbills in front of q store to =
Of oranges.
An assessor asked . woman how
many chickens she had, and, doubt
ing her word, proceeded to count
them. She took him to the bse-
hive, kicked it over, and invited
lim to count the bees.
Not long since, at Sunday-school.
he teacher, after trying hard to
on the minds Of = class of
mall boys the sin Of Sabbath break
ng, asked, as Sunday better than
my other day ?" when the smallest
BOY in the class answered, "You bet
your boots it isl"
As my wife at the window one
beautiful day, stood watching a
nan with q monkey, a cart came
long with broth of q boy, who
vas driving q stout little donkey.
To my wife then / spoke, by way
If a joke, There's q relation Of
1ours in that carriage" To which
he replied. when the donkey she
pied. "Ah. yesl q relation BY
marriage"
A couple Of members of the dar-
Iey conference were passing down
he avenue, when one of them trod
IN the indigsstible portion of .
,ear, and AZ his number elevens
vent up the rest Of his body was
'orrespontiingly lowered. "Ki-yah
'rudder Jones, is you fallen from
,race?" chnckled his companion.
Not prezactly, deacon, Use sittin'
IN the ragged edge of dis pear"
Aunt Hetty inquired of the SER
rant girl recently il she came from
he Hungarian parts Of Ireland.
On being told that her geographic
al knowledge was somewhat de-