The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1878-10-25
HS.
Buzz Honey.
Close qaartcrs-l'he launar y

who had q very clear notion where sar.et
began anti auburn terminated 7"
A Paris paper tells us that the Poles
like the American dancing parties allied
Hop-poles, Of course.
The Chicago Journal believes thatgun
powder can be made from -four. Flour
goes off fast enough now.
The Norristown Herald insists ,hbt no
man likes to hold a girl baby in his arms
aatil she is seventeen years old.
Woman consumes thirty-six buttons on
single pair Of kid gloves, whereas man
buttons his suspenders with single
nail.
80 laather's up, i it said the customer
10 his shoemaker. "No sir, replied the
grispin, "sole leather is down, where it
belongs
A Chicago paper dtses ths man who
wishes to leave name to poslerity to 60
to St. Louis. His name will then app oar
century after century il the Directory.
Remarkably careful is that coal-dealer
who stands on the scale himself to see that
there j. 10 fooIinS With the rsigAt o! 8
load
A Texas man shot his opponent in
luel and is now writing poem about il.
1t looks il the wrong man had been
shot.
A young man in San Francisco put out
one Of his eyes while taking Oh Shirt, a
spiral stud did the mischief. Moral j;
never wear shirt.
Jennie what makes Yon such bad
girl?" "WeI, mamma, God sent you ju. t
the best children He could find, and il
they don't suit you cant help it.
Little Ned asked his father tile other
eyening who made the moon2 "God,. =
answered the father. Yes said Ned, Il
can see the marks Of his dirty fagers.n
A musical critic says Of an expert lady
pianiste that her touch has weight /
twelve pounds; buta mischieyous little son
of hers says it weighs 2+O when she's
good and mad.
OF Iaie: aat are your terms for a
year? And does it cost anything extra #
ny son wants to learn to read and write
az we'll as row a boat 7H
Since the introduction Of fem 10 post
masters a girl goes up to The window and
says is there letter for Miss Margaret
Jobnson9" Yes says the female
postmaster, "here is one from Johr II.
Jones"
A little Brooklyn sirl being reproyed
the other day by her elder sister for using
slang expression, sharply retorted,
Well, if you went into society more,
gou would hear slang. Brooklyn Ctroni
elr.
In Northampton they are laughing at a
we'll known young man because he re-
Gently said when bantered about his affee
ton for lady whose heart is another's
4 Can't admire her as a work of art ~
Brston Globe.
/ Moliere was asked the reasan why, II
certain countries, the king may assume
the crown at fourteen years Of age, and
cannot marry before eighteen. Il is,
answered Moliere, because it is more d
fcult to rule wife than kingdom.
A newly-arrived Chinaman has onl'
twenty five letters Of the English alphabe
% learn; he is well acquainted with t.
Cincinnati Saturday Night. He is als'
apt to be familiar with Sea, and sure t
have a Cue ia his bead PaNddelpAi'
Bulletin.
A cigar contains aeetie acid, tornic
butyrig, valerie and proprioaic acid, prus
sic acid, creosole, carbolic acid, ammonia
sulphureted hydrogen, pyridine, yiridine
picolina, and rubidine, to say nothin
about cabbage and burdockic acid. That
why you can't get good one for less tina
five cents.
Young housekeeper-"I am afraid thos
fsh bought Of you yesterday were nc
fresh. Ny husband said they were ne
nice, at al" Brighton fisherman" Vel
marin, that be your fault; it bean't min
, I've offered EN- yer every day this weel
and you might a 'ad EN- o Monday
you'd loiked London Punch.
The old man, is . playful mood, tire
down the spade bis wife hal put in h
hand with which 70 dig up geraniai
bed, with the remark, preposterously u
ntelligibie to her as he supposed, 4 tur
down spade; you make it, She sal,
4 Look here, Barnabas, you take that Y
. like a man, 81 III make the trump next
: in color, and 60 il alone for the rest Of ii
6 season" "
! A London lady who had spent the be
!. part Of a week in search OF = cook, enda
- .t ,..,,j e{,,.,, Arooz avo n, ), . t;E,t,