The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1878-09-03
lHE SPIRIT OF DEMOCRACY
Sense a,,d nopsense.


A touching incidental physician
feeling patients pulse.
Tomorrow is the day on which idle
men work aud fools reform.
Many are willing enough to wound
who are yet afraid to strike.
The man locks moral courage who
treats when he should retreat.
Hops were invented at the same time
the 6rst stumped toe was discovered.
Il must be awful easy for wooden.
headed man to get his hair shingled.
The Lorillard's pay the government
$4,000, 900 annually as tax upon to-
cacco.
Bob Ingersoll being asked where the
next worlds fair would be, said there
was no next world.
A Texas preacher lost three.fourths
Of Bis deacons by preaching sermon
against horse-racing. n
The camp. meeting horn which sounds
bsfore breakfast is not the horn usually
taken BY sinners.
any rule for punctnating." said the
haxy.eyed compositor, sis to go il as long
- can hold my bfeath. and then slap in a
period"
tmiQhtbe called refined torture when
asweetheart visits her lover in Jail and
tells him what good time she expects to
have ct picnic.
A wag being asked the name Of the in
ventor OF ofbutter.stamps,t that it was proba
bly, Cadmus, as be first brought letters
into Greece.
Jay Charlton, in the Danbury News,
says . strong grasp of the hand beto-
ksns strong heart What magni6-
cent heart lobster must have.
Sidney Smith once rebuked swearing
visitor by saying: "Let US assume that
everything and everyhdy was damned,
and proceed with our subject"
Its generally the successful people
who do not believe in luck; the unsuc-
csssful ones invariably do. The best. way
Isito spell the word with an initial
Pluck.
Baltimore Every Saturday shrieks,
ssGIve as whisky or give US death. -
Why not try some of our Rochester
whisky and combine the two P Roches
tss Express.
Very few people go into an argument
10 order to discover the truth Of the mat
Ter. They wantto hold their own and
rout the enemy. Hence, the general loss
Of temper.
A man wants to see the person against
whom he has the greatest reason 10
gusrd himself. Let him take glance at
Che mirror, and be will have a very fair
likeness of the Individual be is looking
for.
Little Johnny ran into the house the
other day, while the mercury was hug
ging "ninety five degrees" with the per-
spiration streaming from every pore, and
shouted, Mamma, Gx me! I'm leaking
all over II
Weather notes for women: A perish
ing member Of the gentle sisterhood
who breathed her last sigh in St. Louis
during the warm weather, solemnly di-
rected that large palm leaf fan should
be placed in her cofin.-Rochester Un-
zen.
The United States army is pretty busy
just now. One of them goes out to
light twelve thousand Indians every NOR.
ming while the other STAYS at home and
gets breakfast. It's wearing though
on the army. The Indians don't appear
70 mind 1t much.- Bridgeport Standard
We met farmer q day or two ago who
was so bard pushed that he was on hi
way TO pawn his hoe. We told him ",
were sorry 10 see his case so hopeless
.Hopeless !" he exclaimed; star from
n! You know the old motto, "hoepawn
hope ever. Yonkers Gazette.
The Shah took thirty-six caskets o
gold to Paris and took away only eleven
II be had visited Niagara Falls seyera
years ago with bis thirty six caskets o
gold, and remained week or two, b
would have been obliged 10 borrow tel
dollars from q newspaper man to ge
home -Norristown Herald.
Charles Reade is mistaken. Their
are men who could never learn to us
both hands with equal facility. We sa,
one last evening grinding hand orga
In market, and to save his immortal sou
be couldn't budge the crank with hi
left hand. He had neglected to bring
home with him when he came out of th
army. And now let the old mudslinge
call Us bald headed horse.thief, if b
dares.
II am told says London Truth, ssths
sfter the collision on board the two Ge
man irnn-clads, the water-tight doors {
the fore bulk head on board the Kaiss
Friedrich Wilhelm, were closed Wit
such q want of forethought that eigl
men who had gone into the compar
mest to endeavor to stop the leak wei
shnt In and drowned like kittens in
bag. Their fate was not found out u
I'll sitter the ship had been docked
Portsmouth"
4 lady bad Lost her husband, but 81
he'd left OF her mourning and went to pa
tiss. Being asked by one Of those gent
men who attended soirees, as medium
Who she would like to see in spirit, al
having replied, "My poor James" the
parted suddenly rose out ofthe center
the carpet, as 1t were, and stood befo
che whole company, "Oh! Jamts, tell I
are you happy f"' Very" "Are you hs
pier now than when on earth ?" emu
happier" .Then, James, you must be
htsyen?" "No; I'm in hell.
kEOf oil the unbearable nuisant
and unmitigated bores in existence. |
msn whom nothing ever pleases or sat
6es, is the worst. His presence is alws
the signal for the departure OF go
cheer and enjoyment, and the dres
reign OF mental and moral discomfort
He is chronic objector-in fact, m