Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1878-09-19
MISCELLANEOUS.

A North Carolina editor declares that
the man who will read newspaper three
or four years without paying for it will
pasture goat on the grave of his grand
father.
A young woman who used to dig pota-
toes before her father ''struck ile," now
declares she cannot ride on the cars be-
cause the velvet buttons on the seats re-
mind her of caterpillars.
''Do not marry a widower," said the
old lady, ga ready-made family is like
plate of cold potatoes" "OhI I'll soon
warm them over" replied the damsel-
and she did.
An Eastern paper suggestively tells its
readers that when insulted by tramp to
remember that dead bodies are worth $35
at Medical Colleges. Wejudge from this
that dead tramp is worth more than
living one.
William sends letter to the Office ask
ing us to explain what is depressed cur
rency. A depressed currency, William,
an awfully- depressed one, is the buttons.
found in a church collection basket
Philadelphia ChronicIe-HeraId.
Some scientific men claim that the earth
| is drawing nearer the sun every year.
We don't know about that, but we do
know that throughout the season the bot
tom of the strawberry and blackberry
boxes comes closer and closer to the top
ever Burlington Haaokeye.
s'Peter, what are you doing to that
boy ?'' said schoolmaster. F'He wanted
to know if you take ten from seventeen
how many will remain? So took ten of
his apples to show him; and now he
wants 1 should give them back" ''Well
why don't you do it, then ?'' HCoz, sir,
then he would forget how many is left. -
''I know where there is another arm just
as pretty as this one,'' said a young Oil
Citizen to his sweetheart, as he pinched
her fair arm yesterday evening. The
storm that quickly gathered upon the
lady's brow as quickly passed away when
the young man pinched her other arm
and said, cit is this one, dear. ."-Ou City
Derrick.
During dense fog Mississippi steam
boat took landing. A traveller, anxious
to go ahead. came to the unperturbed
manager of the wheel and asked why they
stopped. ''Too much fog; can't see the
river.'' ''But you can see the stars over
head.'' eyes replied the urbane pilot
''but until the biler busts we amt going
that way" The passenger went to bed
A national bank note issued anywhere
T in the United States lacked only one
quarter of l per cent. of being equal tC
gold in New York yesterday. That IL
much better than could have been done
when we had specie payments prior to th'
war. But the Democrats are not happy
The sight of honest money makes then
mad Cincinnati Gazette.
, A gentleman who was having his boot!
+blacked at the post-offfce was suddenly
, left in an unfinished state by the boy. ,.wht
ran across the street and held brief con
versation with lad of his own age
F'That's no way to leave jOb,'' said the
gentleman, as the boy returned. "Spec
not, but I've got morne'n boots to lool
: after.' ''Who was that boy?' ''Tha
: boy? Why, he's got a chattel mortgag,
on this 'ere new brush, and 1 run across
5 there to ask him how was his health.
don't propose to be set down on and wounC
! up into bankruptcy, jist because l cam
talk sweet to Billy and stave him off til
l 1 wear the bristles clear off the brush !''-
: Detroit Free Press.
! Every pressure that political influenc
can bring is being used to compel a solit
Democratic vote for George L. Converse
! His friends feel that unless he can sue
ceed in securing the full party vote tn
election of Lorenzo English is assured
/ Fortunately for the public good, the indie
n Ependent voter is around this year, and h
= VIM make his influence felt at the polls
{ ManyQen who have voted the Democrat
O ticket for years are repudiating Converse
h oecause they know the man and despis
u ~, ms crooked political and personal course
3 S Hnow that no good end can be ac
Il Io,h hPliSiled by his election, and propose t,
l. NIL iiiin ol forever and thus purify tn
e polIIlcal atmosphere. And this feeling i
. not alone confined to Franklin count,,
h From all points of the Ninth district Al,
same expressions of condemno+io,,o :,
e coming. 1t is only occasionally tbot ~,
e voters are thoroughly awakened to . ,o
: alizing sense of the dangers that threate,
n them. when parties become corrupt, an
c bad men assume control; but when tn
awakening comes, the result is damagin
q a to those who stand in -thA-A.''7r-o n0ne'
: reform. The stream cannot rise highe
d than the source; neither can you expe'
# that political reform can be accomplishe
> by men whose entire lives have been dt
q voted to the manipulation of party fc