davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
HUMOROUS.
That Mule,

was that there cuSsed mule.
They cussed and swore-he would not G
Until he felt inclined;
And though they showered blow on blo1
He wouldn't change his mind. -g
The deck hand to the shore then cried
This here's bound to stay
And still upon the critters hide
With lash they fired away.
His master from the shore replied;
The boats about to sail,
As every other means you've tried,
Suppose you twist his tail?
" It's likely that will make him land"
The deck man brave, though pale,
Approached with outstretched hand,
To twist that there mules tail.
There came a sudden kick behind!
The man-Oh! where was he?
Ask of the soft blowing wind,
The fishes in the seal!
For a moment there was not a sound,
As that mule winked his eye, -...
AS though to ask of those around:
Now, how is that for high?"
3" Cut that mules throat right away"
The captain did command;
But the nobIest critter killed that day,
Was the fearless, brave deck hand.
A dentists sign-Draeoing, music
and dancing.
Here is your writ of attachment, :"
said town clerk as he handed a
lover marriage license.
.yYil the coming woman lecture ?"
asks contemporary. II she mar
ries, she will a ga --
A Sunday school boy, upon being
asked what made the Tower of Pisa
lean, replied. Because of the famine
in the land"
A teetotaler says the drop-curtain
of a theatre is so called because the
gentlemen go out for drop while it
is down. go. . e go
"Whaes the best muzzle for a
dog?" asked one nefghbor of anoth :
er. THE muzzIe of a gum" was the
grim reply. A
you couldn't believe now" said
afoppish young man to q simple old
lady, "that ] was born with a silver
spoon in my mouth, could you?"
She looked at his large mouth amo-
ment and said: why, yes l could
believe it was a silver soup ladle.' .
"Theu are fine novels of yours,
Sir Walter; they are just invaluable
to me-"
Il am glad to hear it. Tom, re-
turned the novelist.
Yes. sir said Tom; "for when
have been out all day, hard at
work, and come home very tired. and
take up one of your novels, I'm
asleep directly"
Two old acquaintance meeting,
one ofthem asked the other: What
became of our old friend the colonel,
who went to Texas p ale was hang
ed for shooting lawyer down there"
was thereby. "Indeeir exclaim-
ed the first speaker. "Wen. well
They do hang a man for almost any
thing in that State p
Fifty years hence" said an old
infdel, people will wonder that
there should ever have been even
discussion of a place of future pun-
ishment. yes" responded cler-
gyman. "people who are new fifty
years old will then no doubt wonder
that there should have been any need
of discussing it,
A member of the sanitary police
force came across boy. the other
day, who was wheeling home load
of oyster cans and bottles, and, Curl
Gus to know what ase the lad could
put them to, lie made direct inqui-
ry.
Going to throw them over into
our backyard, F" replied the boy. II
took two loads home yesterday"
''But what do you use 'em for?''
lit s trick of the ia mily," grin
ned the lad.
How trick?"
I'D just as lief tell" continued
the hoy 40 he snat IN his hands tn
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
Recommended by the Press.


1t is a source of much pleasure and
qualification to notice articles as the
following which appeared in a recent
number of the Patriot and Herald, pub
lishcdae Marion, Va:
SEVEN SPRING "IRoN AND ALUM
Mass. Y This celebrated preparation is
daily adding TO its already justly won
celebrity. From all sections of the
country, we receive the most favorable
accounts of its great efficacy. 1t has
been used with the most satisfactory
results by a great number of our citizens,
for various diseases, such as Scar Throat,
Erysipelas, Dyspepsia and a variety of
chronic affections. Nearly every one
who has tried it, speak oft as wonder
ful specific. AS for my own experience,
can truly say, that 1 have never found
such speedy and effective remedy for
disordered stomach and Sick Headache.
If properly used it will certainly relieve
these unpleasant complaints in an as
tonishingly brief space of time. With
our personal knowledge of its medical
virtues, and knowing the source from
whence it is obtained, az well as a per-
sonal acquaintance with the manufac-
lures, we can confidently recommend
its use to any who may be afflicted as a
safe and reliable family medicine.
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03

Fifty years hence" said an old
inidel people will wonder that
there should ever have been even q
discussion of a place of future pun-
ishment." Yes responded a cler-
gyman. "people who are new fifty
years old will then no doubt wonder
that there should have been any need
of discussing it,
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
TO CONSUME

The advertiser, having been permanently cured
of that dread disease, Consumption, by simple
remedy, is anxious to make known to his fellow
sufferers the means of cure. To all who desire it,
he viii send copy of the prescription used, Gree
of charge), with the directions for preparing and
using the same, which they will find sure cure
for Consumption, Asthma, Bronchitis, &c.
Parties Wishing the prescription, will please adj
dress, E. A. WILSON, 1874 Penn St., Williams burg
New York. feb13 6In
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03

DEST BUSINESS YOU CAN ENGAGE IN
ID s. to $40 per day made by any worker of either
sex, right in their own localities Particulars and
samples worth s. free. Improve your spare time
at this BUSINESS Address STINsoN & Co., Port
land, Maine.
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03

sin view of the wonderful progress
which has already been made, we be-
gin to realize the great Importance
Of American pomology; nor should
we forget, as among the great bene-
fits of fruit culture. the employment
of thousands of men. women, and
children, or the immense amounts
paid for freights on fruits to rail
roads. steamboats,: &c, and the
nro6ts ~ dealers -.
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
CONCERNING Fruit Culture.

Hon. Marshall P, Wilder. Of Mas
sachusetts, one among a very few of
the oldest and most experienced hor-
ticulturists in the United States. in
a pamphlet giving the History and
Progress Of the Massachusetts State
Board of Agriculture for the First
Quarter of a Century, in Report
on Fruits, gives some valuable facts
of which the following are extracts
THE estimate by the government
for the Centennial year, 1876 fur
nished the following statistics of the
fruit culture of our country:
ssThe number of acres under culti-
walton in orchards, vines, and small
fruits, is estimated at 100000.
The number of trees is estimated as
follows: apples, IL, 100000; pears.
2S,26O,OOO; peaches, 12,27O,O0O
grapes, 141. 26O,OO0-total. 393,79O,-
900. The estimated value of fruit
products is. apples, $50,400. 600;
pears, S14,13O.0OO; peaches, $780,
1885, grapes. 1900; straw
berries, s., 100000 I; other fruits.$10,-
S432 ,8O0--making. q grand total of
@138, 216, 700, or nearly equal to one
half of the value of our average
wheat crop. California, to say moth
ing of figs. oranges. olives and al
monds, has 10000 acres of vine
wards, and $4,000, 900 of vines yield
ing annually, besides grapes and
raisins for the market, 10000. 900
of gallons of wines, to which may be
added the wines of Missouri, Ohio,
and other States; the whole annual
wine product being fifteen millions
of gallons.
'sThe following are few illustra-
lions of the immense quantities OF
fruits which are sent to market in
addition to what is consumed at
home.
"Of strawberries, there were re-
ceived in one day in the New York
market. at the height of the season
from all sources, seven thousand |
ates--more than ten thousand !
bushels. The cropof peaches raised |
in this country is SO enormous that
we hardly dare state the quantity.
The largest crop was in 1875; and,
on the peninsula of Delaware and
Maryland alone, it was estimated at
between seven million and eight mil
lion baskets.
s.From California, there were sent |
east, in 1876, three hundred and
thirty-four car loads of fruit, of four
hundred bushels each.
The increase of strawberry cul-
ture in the vicinity of Norfolk, Va,
is astonishing. completely heading !
the page of horticultural progress.
The shipments of 1877 were over
three millions of quarts. There were
nearly ten thousand piekers in the
field in one day. One grower had
hundred and eighty-fye acres. To
Boston alone there were shipped
last year eleven thousand FIVE hun
dred and forty-seEen crates,fof forty
five quarts each, or more than six
teen thousand bushels. a-z
THE increase in the crops Of ap-
pies in New York, Michigan, and the
more Western States, is wonderful.
From New York, it is estimated
that, in abundant years, a million
and a half of barrels are exported /
in addition to those consumed at
home. One county, it is said, re-
ceived one million year of dollars
for-apples sold : a single firm at Bos-
ton receives from that State from
thirty thousand to forty thousand
barrels of apples per year
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
How trick 2

I'D just as lief TELL" continued
the boy, as he spat on his hands to
resume his hold of the barrow.
Were going to have some relashuns
come in from the country. We may
not have much to eat. but if they see
these cans. and bottles, and boxes
they'll think we've had oysters,
champagne, figs and nuts till we've
got tired of 'em. and are living on
bread and Eaters for a healthy
change"
Tie officer scratched his ear like
a man who had received a new idea.
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
profits to dealers


"Some have feared that there
might be an over-production of fruit
but the whole crop may now be saw
ed and utilized by the new methods
which are being constantly invented
for curing and distributing this sur
plus.
"The perfection now attained in
the drying and canning process
possessing the great advantage. for
transportation, of reducing the
weight three-fOurths or more by the
renewal of water. and rendering it
capable OF shipment to all chimes.
and OF being preserved perfectly for
years-will. in all probability, over
come this difficultys which only oc
ours on bearing and abundant years.
The demand abroad for dried fruits
is very large. and is daily increasing.
The exports for the year ending June
80. 1877, were 1873 52 pounds |
duu8 II tHCJ Ctu nc dAlOIOSu dt a III /
tie less price, it isthought it would |
be enormous. England, Germany, |
and Australia, would be great pur-
chasers. Besides. we are Constantly !
inyenting new methods for preserv-
ing fruits by preparations in various
nutritious and elegant forms, which
might absorb our abundant crops.
and take the place Of those unhealthy
preserves and sweetmeats in which
our markets abound, aud which are
SO Injurious TO the health Of eur peo-
pleszf - 49, &c.
@Can the ghost of chance be
properly called spiritual opportu-
nifty 2 asks a correspondent.
Aspirftual opportunity might &C.
cur when the barkeeper goes down
celler for some more ice, aud leaves
q decanter on the countes. - Y
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03

q r. r. A WEEK IN YOUR OWN TOWN. $500
eDDO Outfit free. No risk. Reader, if you
want business at which persons of either sex cab
make great pay all the time they work, write for
particulars to a. HALLETT & Co Portland, Maine.
The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1878-07-03
MEXICAN
MUSTANG. Liniment,
FOR MAN AND BEAST.

Thts1inimentver naturally originated in Arnerf-
ca, where Nature provides in her laboratory such
surprising antdotes for the maladies of her chill
dren. Its fame has been spreading for S. years.
until now it encircles the habitable globe.
The Mexican Mustang Eminent is q matchless
remedy forall external ailments of man and beast.
To stock owners and farmers it is Invaluable.
A single bottle often saves a human life or re-
stores the usefulness of excellent horse, OK,
COW, or sheep.
1t cures foot-rot, hoof-ail, hollow horn, grub
screw-wornn, shoulder-rot, mango, the bites and
stngs of poisonous reptiles and insects, and every
such drawback to stock breeding and bush life.
It cures every external trouble of horses, such
lameness, scratches, syvinny, sprains, founder,
WindgaIl, ring ETC., ETC.
The Mexican Mustang Lniment is the quickest
cure in the world for accidents occurring In the
family, in the absence of physician, such as
burns scalds, sprains, cuts, ETC., and for rheuma
tism, and stiffness engendered by exposure. Par
ticularly valuable to Miners.
1t is the cheapest remedy in the world, for 1t
penetrates the muscle to the bone, and single
application is generally sufficient to cure.
. Mexican Mustang Lininaent is put up in three
sizes of bottles, the larger being proportion
ately much the cheapest. Sold everywhere. Q
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21
FOB RENT AND SALE.
r STANLEY JONES,
REAL ESTATE BROKER,
s1l SEVENTH STREET.

Houses FOR Sole
Isl t an ans q l2h siSf ssSflss
Mcpherson Place n w.,S stories mod. imp> .25 90
St, bet. 81 and 3d $. 5 stories Is rsml s 900
est. bet. LIST and 2i 8 stories M So. 1000
st. bet Is H and i4th s!?sss RS m go
ST., bet u, and 18th ST., 10 RS. m. 4. 500
st. a., bs 81 and ar SIS stories 10 mi eo0
LIST, bet. Cap; and n. ne ST.. l. new 3, 500
1 1gth b. bet h, and Isl so o
ECapst, bet. 9th 9th ses st., ID rs. mi $50
Mass. av.. be. Cap 4 LIST st. n w. rs. ,srs.m 5000
Columbia st; bet; and VS. m H.. 300
ST., BET. 14th and 18th 20 st. 6 2, $50
St bet 1st and 2ds.e..3 mi ...... 700
All ST. bet A and - g :. res m. 4 q, 900
18th ST. bet 2 and Rn. w.,S st. rs, m.i.. 100
st. bet Cap. ana 1st n. VIZ story franz 800
s1st ST bet s ana I'm W ssErse CO.
IN ST bet. E&Fn.e: frame. l'ge ground 900
St, let Sd aud 4ta mes stories, N. i.... 500
hs, bet 18th LII Esnna:n.w.ss II MI 200
Hsmp ava an G HsS
goth ST., het.S ard T NV. story frame .. l. 300
LIZ AND AND
st, bet Cap and LIST stories, mi 500
S y5e H1 and Is, store
B st ,tet:l and 81 Rvs st., 10 rs mi 10 600
18th. above Circle. 3 stories II rs. m.i...1 IL 600
Building Lots FOR Sale.
Per foot.
side F bet, 10Th Goth W, 23lbXl2l2 II 81 90
SIDE Mass. ay he. 1Ith& Is III 81 $50 81
Conn. ave., bet. III and ST., whole front .....l %
Hamp. ave., bet \ and y StS................. %
Mass. ave. bet. tn and 18TH SITS ... g.,
S.Side Z, bet. 14th and 18TH NV. 43 100 rt zee. 60
orr er New Hampshire avenue and 10th to-. 81
NV. corner l4th and Pierce st. n. with imps 50
18th. b, t. Il and SITS. ........ IA
Wv. ner LIST and X SITS. n.e............... 800 ~
side Rhode Island ave. bet. IA IN and IL, SIS 80
North Capitol bet. H and StS. ne. . 49,. IS
To Loan.
So oC0, 81, 500, 81 600 on frst-cass real estate
security.
J. STANLEY JONES,
fe! 2O-tr GIL Seventh street.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

test vote in the lower house of the Mary
land legislature showed by majority of II to
that a bill introduced TO open the profession
of the law to negroes will pass that body. The
Court of Appeals of Maryland decided some
time ago. that negro could not be admitted
to practice law in the courts of that state. and
this bill is intended to remedy the defect in
the statute law. The Gazette says that the
condition of the law excluding negro practi-
TONERS, lis felt to be diScOrdant with the
whole current of events since the war; and
that public opinion now demands the passage
Of the hill
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

The New Workers are again discussing the
question of the taxation of church property.
According to the statements, that class of
property has large privileges. III church
corporation builds ever SO small church
on a block of ground on Fifth Avenue, or
any other hgh-priced locality, the whole block
is exempt from taxes. There is no limit.
Instances are mentioned. such as Fordham
College, with its one hundred and thirty acres
of surrounding grounds. free from any tax
burden under this law. A religious cOrpO-
ton, a hospital, school or reiormatOry might
take a thousand acres. enclose ii and have it
thereby exempted. It is proposed, therefore,
TO limit the amount of church property exempt
from taxation to 10000 square feet
In Washington only the property actually
used for church purposes is exempt we be
lieye. The argument made in favor of the
churches is that church property should be
exempt for the reason that it is set apart for a
purpose from which no revenue can be de-
rived. In a business point of view. il is ar
gued that capital sunk without hope of return
should not be taxed. OF course this argument
would not apply where large blocks of ground
are held by churches for sale when it becomes
valuable. Another argument of some force
in behalf of the churches is that if iailS, work
houses, and refOrmatOrieS are exempt, ii
would I've consistent as well as wise to exempt
as well buildings devoted to the prevention of
crime. A church, it is urged. is pre- eminently
4 public institution. and should not he mea-
Sured by the amount of reformatOry influence
seen, but by the amount seen by no one else
but the Creator.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

An amendment To the bill To regulate the
compensation of pOstmaSterS was adopted in
the Senate yesterday by Il vote of ;5 to q, al
lowing the ranking privilege to the President,
the Vice President, and Senators and Repre-
sentatiyeS and Delegates i'm Congress. to the
amount of two ounces OF written or printed
matter The restriction to two ounces in
weight will cut off some of the abuses of the
old system 1t will not be convenient, for in
stance for a member of economical mind to
frank his dirty linen home to he washed and
returned-at least not in single package, ac-
cOrding to the old practice. but by dividing up
shirts, collars. and wristbands into small par
GELS, good deal could still be accomplished in
this way. There does not seem to be any prOvi-
sion TO prevent the abuse of the privilege by
supplying franks to parties not entitled to
them 1t would be difficult, indeed. to frame
a bill that wOald prevent the improper use of
franks. OF course a considerable proportion
of the officials entrusted with the privilege
would not abuse it and then again there are
lots of them who wouldn't have any scruples
whatever in the exercise of the largest liberty
in the matter. That was the experience under
the old law. and human nature hasn't I'M
proved i'll any colossal degree since it was re-
pealed.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

Letters should be addressed to the Editorial or
Business Manager OF THE STAR, according to their
tenor, and not to any Individual name. Otherwise
provoking delays may occur.
Checks, etc., should In all cases be made payable
to the order Of THE EVENING STAR NEWSPAPER
COMPANY,-not to that Of any Individual.
A6Anonymous communications not read; re-
Iected manuscripts not returned or preserved.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

England still seems to have influence enough
with the Turkish government TO cause the dis
missal Of an ObiectiOna BILE minister of foreign
affairs. And Turkey appears disposed to re-
ceiye Russian proposals with maiden coyneSS
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

We observe by the Peoria papers that Col.
X. G. IngersOIl offers his property in that city
for sale with the view of taking up his perma-
nent residence in Washington. The Inference
is that hc finds less hell in Washington than in
Illinois
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

Great things are expected from the new
Pope His moderate views will cause him to
enter cheerfully into that course of prudent
Cancellation which his prOverbial shrewdness
will suggest TO him as the wiseSt to be now
pursued. 1t lies in his power TO vastly in
crease the influence for good exerted by the
Roman Catholic church, and to cause himself
TO be ranked as a bencfactOr of mankind,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

If the people would only learn the process of
curing the leaf, as good tea can he produced
in Georgia a. in China. Tea has been planted
Within a few miles of Atlanta. if somebody
hasn't cut them down, are tea trees thirty
feet high. planted in ls42.-[ General 10OHbs
Won't the General take off few inches from
the hight of these tea trees?
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21
100.

Mr.. Morgan sticks to both positions, that of
Chief of Police, and his previous one in the
Fire Department. He ought To- take warning
by the fate of a late corporation official who
from his tenacity in holding on to half dozen
Offices acquired the sObriquet of six Teat.''
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

The ele ctiOn of Pope was SO speedy that
some OF the Catholic clergy of this city scarce
ly credited the news of it yesterday. The cleo
tiOn of Plus IN upon the fourth ballot was
deemed extraordinary that of Leo Mi upon
the third ballot is considered a notable proof
OF his manifest eligibility.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

ROumana and Seryia grumbe. Austria
Sulks, and England fumes. Bismarck is cheer
fully indifferent, and the Car is going to make
all he can.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21
tn AdyertiSerS.

Advertisers are requested to send In their an
nouncements early In the day as possible, and In
ali cases before IL O'Clock n. The insertion In the
same days issue OF those reaching the ONCE after
that hour cannot be assured.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21
81. 900 at s per cent.

FOR RENT.
HOUSE No. $40 18th st. NV, containing
repair.
nos. 1884 1896 1898 Q st. NV, eleven rooms
each; all modern improvements. These houses
have never been occupied.
CASSIN & LIEBERMANN
feb16-1Ot 1889 st. n. W. (SecOnd fioOr.D
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21

AreSUoe s,roru DGUg Circulation 0reT
1S,6OO-betn0 more than three times thds
of any other daily paper ia Wnshtngt9nI
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1878-02-21
WIN. T.. BURFORD.
w Real Estate Broker, No. 7O8 e street.

PROPERTY FOR RENT.
NO. l448 ST., IL rs. all mod. imps., (new). $50
NO. 475 Missouri ave, IL rs, all mod nps., (new) AZ
No 17Ol ST., 6rs., gas and water ....... 15
offer for " 800, on easy terms, two thoroughly
modern HOUSES, situated northwest and renting
each for S25 per month.
also offer great bargains in large business prop
erty. with slight inCumbrance. To sell or trad ,,
Purchasers wanted for bargains in property, i'm
proved or unimproved, in all sections of the city
IS. 600 and 81, 500 to loan Immediately. febl5 -tr