Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1878-12-16
South Gelniltts.
A MONKEY DINNER-PARTY.


~
1t was the Funniest dinner party that
could be imagined. Five highly re-
spectacle monkeys in full dress sat at
table with plates and wine-glasses,
and the sprightliest, most attractive of
monkeys waited upon them. tray in hand
like good, highly genteel waitress, as
she was.
The monkey at the head of the table
was dressed as naval officer, with ad-
mirals hat, epaulettes, and side whisk-
ers all complete. He was very elegant
in his manners, when not licking his
plate, and he had an injured, reproach-
full way of turning on his seat and look
ing at the waitress when she failed to
bring him what he wanted, that was
wonderful to see. At the foot of the
feast sat farmer monkey in funny felt
hat, white smock and loose trousers.
He had tremendous appetite and soon
finished his meal and began knocking
hard upon the table for more. The ad-
miral, who was very proud, never once
noticed him, which the hungry farmer
accepted in good part, as he didn't take
any very great intereit in admirals.
But the side of the table was liyeliest
after all. In the middle sat a fine
monkey-lady, whom | afterwards learn
ed was called "Mrs. Lorne," and the
monkey gallants on each side took turns
in conversing with her. Sometimes,
indeed. they both addressed her at once,
and then the fashionable Mrs. Lorne
would utter a fearful screech and give
them piece of her mind, to the great
terror of the farmer and the amazement
of the admiral. She was a lovely crea-
ture in their eyes, you may be sure. for
she wore red velvet dress and a white
hat with bright pink feather, and her
coquettish way of tossing her head was
quite irresistible. Wine was freely
taken by all the guests, but l learned
later that it was only raspberry juice
and water. 1t was funny enough to see
them take up their glasses in one hand
bow to each other, toss off the contents
and then pound the table for a fresh
supply.
l could not see what they had to eat,
but it evidently was something good,
for they smacked their lips over it and
grabbed bits from each others plates
so often that their master frequently
was obliged to expostulate with them.
All, the master l forgot to speak Of
him. He was their servant just then
and stood at respectful distance be-
hind the table, bottle in hand, ready
to fill their glasses whenever called
upon, or gently to remind the guests
that to lick ones plate is not looked
upon as good table manners. Mean
time the pretty waitress skipped about
bringing this thing and that as The
master ordered, and often sinking into
, little chair near by for rest and solemn
J meditation. The dear thing was easily
i clustered" and the manners of thu
admiral sometimes so confused her tina
she seemed almost ready TO faint. "A
one time, when the master put pal
, of lighted candles in her hands, biddin,
} her hold them very carefully, she sprani
7 up and ran from the stage with them
! holding them both upside down, still
: blazing and scattering. Now and the
, the temptation to get bit from tn
r table grew so strong that she woul'
! watch her chance to take sly gra
! when the guests were chattering togeth
, err Whenever she succeeded in thi
the hundred of spectators would ar
, plaud heartily. We children though
! it rather improper for grown people t
t encourage theft in that way, but W
3 couldn't help feeling sympathy for tn
| pretty waitress. Notwithstanding GU
good morals.-,St. Nicholas.