The new Northwest. [volume] (Portland, Or.) 1871-1887, 1878-08-08

father Of my children, and in spite o
nv oft-made resolves to have nothing
more to do with him, forgot all else
save the relations he bore to US, aud the
fact that he had once been inexpressioly
dear TO me.
OF course my reader is Thoroughly
disgusted with me by this time. Very
we'll; so be it. But please remember
that a million wives are to-day endur-
ing different degrees Of dissatisfaction,
who are as often resolving TO break
their bonds, and as often succeeding in
breaking only their word, as I. / DO not
offer this fact in extenuation Of what
you may choose TO consider my folly. ]
merely proclaim il as the truth.
To recount the weary labors and the
.ceaseless vigils Of the next six weeks
would only tire you. For several days
Gerald lay in a state Of coma so nearly
allied to death that the'corps Of skilled
physicians whom I called from Oregon
City and Portland to attend him we'll
nigh gave up the case as hopeless.
Then he began to change for the bet
ter, and my real trouble commenced iu
earnest. He would allow no one TO lift
him, give him food or water, or in any
other way assist him, except myself.
His tone and manner were so authorita-
[ tive that / never thought Of refusing TO
obey. Indeed, marvellous as it now
seems, even TO myself, I was mortally
afraid of him. ! felt willing to do any
thing else for peace except fight for il.
Besides, the news Of my vehement con-
duet, as related in the preceding chap
ter, had been so well circulated that !
felt it necessary to retrieve my charac-
ter. And this I thought could only DO
by making a martyr Of myself i'm a
double sense. The opinion prevailed
among my neighbors that it was my IN
wifely vehemence that had driven my
husband to extremities, and I, with the
sense of magnanimity strong within
me, willingly allowed myself to bear
the entire blame without protest.
I lifted Gerald till I so severely
strained my muscles that carbuncles
formed on the cords OF my arms. Added
to these was the dreadful malady, pro-
ldpsus, so common among overburdened
women. And / know that / waited
upon him for many weeks, dancing i'm
mediate attendance upon his smallest
whims, when he was far more able to
care for himself than was to care for
anybody.
During his illness our harvest, so
promising before be returned to blight
it, was necessarily neglected, and we did
not save the half Of that which we bad
counted upon.
Then came the tug Of war. The
physicians bills were enormous, and
the drug bills almost equal TO them. But
/ I felt secure in possession Of my home
stead, and vowed that my husband
should liquidate his own bills or they
should remain unpaid.
But again / reckoned without my
host. The expenses, one and all, had
been incurred by my orders, aud 1 wa,
considered morally and legally bounC
for them. The bills came in, and as
could not honor them without sellin,
my home, I was constrained to do il.
Since have grown older and wiser,
have learned that this extreme step wa
not legally necessary, as the officers @
the law could not have levied upon m,
individual real estate without my PEI
mission. But I did not know it ther
nor did / deem it womanly for my Sc
to understand the law. / was an ex
treme stickler for what / considere
womanly propriety when in my norma
! senses, aud / never allowed myself {
get excited beyond self-control afte
that memorable time when / had defie
my husband and the law, with no last
ing benefit to my purse, position, G
property.
Gerald promised, If I would sell th
land, that he would go into Easter
Oregon aud secure me another trac
equal in acreage, and far superior i
many respects to my present Homestead
Although he had so often wronged m
= as a wife, be had never literally broke
his word about minor matters, and
had no fear but that he would do as
> agreed. True, l was afraid to trust hiI
with money because of his inebrietl
I but this | could obviate by only allow
ing him a sufficient sum to defray h
travelling expenses up the Columbi
River. Because Of my ailments, il wl
not possible for me to accompany hir
upon the journey, and neither could
leave the children, not one Of whom ha
ever remained alone an hour since tbs
never-tO-be-forgotten day in Melbourn
when I, a mere child, had wandere
away for a season from Gerald, m
baby, and thereby given Gerald, m
, husband, an excuse, as be thought, f
getting deeply intoxicated.
+ 30 my husband, as soon as he becam
= o'u VA'eseent, departed for the scene
De" operau Us, leaving behind a loo
OF solemn promises Of comnlsta go,
y ton, In which had no shadow ~ aa-.
It deDce. ''uo" oil conf
d In a fortnight he returned. soh.- -.
nified, and self-confident. I was ova
], joyed. Was it possible that the event,
2, OF our lives was yet to be Illuminated
y the ravs of truth aud sOberuess2