The weekly democratic statesman. [volume] (Austin, Tex.) 1871-1883, 1878-02-07
Good Story About Alexander
stephens and Rob ToOnbs.

The New York World tells that a
doctor named Roystoa had sued Peter
Bennett for his bill, long overdue, for
attending the wife of the latter. Alex
ander II. Stephens was on the Bennett
side, and Robert Toombs, then Senator
of the United States, was tor DIR. Rows.
ton. The Doctor proved the number
of his visits, their value according TO
local custom and his own authority to
do medical practice. Mr.. stephens
told his client that the physician had
made out has case, and as there was
nothing wherewith to rebut or offset
the claim, the only thing left to do was
to pay it. "No, said Peter; al hired
you to speak IN my case, and now
speak"
Mr.. Stephens told him there was
nothing TO say; he had looked on to
see that it was made out, AID it was.
Peter was obstinate, and at last Mr..
Stephens told him to make a speech
himself, if he thought one could be
made.
'I will," said Peter Bennett, "if
Bobby Toombs won't be too hard on
me-
"Gentiemen of the jury-You and
is plain farmers, and II we don't stick
together these ere lawyers and doctors
will git the advantage of US. aint no
lawyer nor doctor, and amt no objec-
tions to them in their proper place; but
they siRt farmers, gentlemen of the
jury.
snow, this man Royston was new
doctor, and went Tor him to come an
to doctor my wife's sore leg. And he
come an put some salve truck onto it
and some rags, but never done 1t one
bit Of good, gentlemen of the jury. |
don't believe he is no doctor, no way.
There is doctors as is doctors sure
enough, but this man don't earn his
money; aud If you send for him, ae
Mrs. Sarah Atkinson did, for negro
boy as was worth $1,000, he just kills
him and wants pay for it,"
81 don't, thundered the doctor.
''Dld you cure him2' asked Peter,
with the slow accents Of a judge with
the black cap on.
The doctor was silent, and Peter pro-
ceeded;
''As | was sayin', gentlemen of the
1
ton has got to give vally for the money
we ask, and doctors aint none too good
to be put to the same rule. And don't
believe this Sam Royston Is Lo doctor,
nohow."
The physician again put in his oar,
with, Look at my diploma if you
think l am no doctor"
''His diplomam exclaimed the new
fedged orator with great contempt
His diplomat. Gentlemen, that is q
big word fur printed sheepskin, and it
didn't make no doctor of the sheep as
first wore it, nor does it of the man as
now carries it. A good newspaper has
more in it, and l pint out to ye that he
amt no doctor at ALL"
The man of medicine was now in a
fury, and screamed out, "Ask my patti
ents if am not a doctor!"
81 asked my wife," retorted Peter,
''an' she said as how she thought you
| wasn't"
"Ask my other patients" said DIR.
Royston.
This seemed to be the straw that
broke the camel's back, for Peter re-
piled with look End tone of unuttera-
BILE sadness:
THAT is hard sayin', gentlemen of
the Jury, and one that rqaires me to
die or to have powers as I've hearn tell
ceased to be exercised since the Apos-
ties. Does he expect me to bring the
Angel Gabriel down to toot his horn
before his time and cry aloud, Awake,
ye dead, and tell this court and jury
your opinion of Royston's pracucen
Am L to go to the lonely churchyard
and rap on the silent tomb and say to
um as is at last at rest from pyhsic and
doctor bills, Git up here, you, and
state il you died a natural death, or
was hurried up some by doctorsr He
says ask his patients, and gentlemen OF
the jury, Mey are all dead.' Where is
Mrs. Beazly's man Sam! Go ask the
worms in the graveyard where he lies.
NIr. Peakc's woman Sarah was attended
by HIM, and her funeral was app'inted,
aud he had the corpse ready. Where
is that likely Bill us belonged to Mr..
Mitchell9 Now in glory a. expressin'
his opinion on BoysiOn's doctorin'.
Where is that baby gal of Harry Ste
phens'sY She are where doctors cease
from iroublIn' and the infants are at
rest.
Gentlemen of the jury, he has ct
chicken enough at my house to pay for
his sslve. and turned the rag, and l
don't suppose he charges for mskin' of
her worse, and even he don't pretend
to charge for curin' of her, aud am
humbly thankful that he Iever gave
her nothin' for her inwards, as be did
his other patients, for sometbIn' made
um all die mighty sudden.
Here the applause made the speaker
sit down in great confusion, and in
spite of a logical restatement Of the
case by Senator Toombs, the doctor
lost and Peter Bennett won.