Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1878-11-20
H,l NOR.
The following epitaph is authentic,
,6eing taken from the diary of we'll
known stonecutter of this CITY:

A"o"n stonecutter OF THIS city:
Please stranger pause, and hold thy breath
| Here lies my dear wife Polly;
She WAS cut down by cruel DEATH "a
! who stopped her hunan folly.
! Her tongue was longer than her life
| But she's AT rest you see;
! Death granted 10 my darling wife
what she Il not grant 10 me.
She Oft was chilled when in the air.
! When cold wonld strike her brow
But 1t has been my constant prayer
That she's not chilly now
Boston Trareier
Uneasy sits the youth astride the
iirst saddle.-Syrdcuse Sunday Times.
A dromedary is camel that has
got his back up" twice Nem Haqen
Register.
Des Moines has four brass bands and
in some parts OF the city NIL the cats
have left.-Iowa State Register.
The New York Commercial proposes
an expedition for the discovery of
David Davis. Now, who is David
Davis 1Buba!o Express.
The man whose song is inspired by
Old rye may be looked upon rs rye
sing man. He will lie elevated fire.
quently.-New Orleans Picoy,ne.
The pensive Indian, as n work of
nature, is grand and noble, but as a
work Of art how useful he is to the
toiling tobacconist.- Hockensack Repub-
Hcdn.
In view ofthe many abortive attempts
of Eastern boys to go west in murderous
pursuit of Indians and buffalo, a revised
edition Of the lexicon Of youth is imper-
atlvely necessary.-Ddnb,vy News
This winter the walls of the ulster
overcoat will be deadened, so that a
man can button himself inside Of one,
and sing ut the top of his voice, without
disturbing anybody else in the car
Hamkeye.
The woodchuck claims to be the only
prophet. but isn't every quadruped four
runner.-Gmphic Certainly not. You
wouldn't call mans confidence four
runner because it is forfeited, would
you?-Piladslphia BMktin.
1t is reported that Edison has invent
ed an ink that, on being applied to pa
per- forms itself into letters and words,
no matter how illiterate the person
may be who employs it, thus doing
away with the necessity for learning to
write. Unreliable Saturday Night.
The kind Of man we seldom meet is
he who can pick II single three-cent
piece from among pocketful of keys
with a mitlened hand when he has but
two seconds to catch n ferry-boat--and
answer political questions at tho same
time without being disconnected -FaI-
ling Leaves.
What row these two countries are
kicking up about few fish. We
wouldn't be bit surprised, if this kind
of thing keeps on, to receive peremp-
tory demand from the governor Of Min
nesota to pay that state in full for that
pickerel we caught in Lake Minnetonka
last summer-Hawkeye.
Few people outside of newspaper
Office can conceive Of the trials and vex-
alton of the editorial profession. Just
rs you have got ready to write m orig
inal article the scissors turn up, and
when you do find them, ten chances to
one that they are as dull as hoe
Boston Transcript.
"Well, will take it, though it is rath-
|
the rest. That do?' 1T will" IN
the course of time the creditor, thinking
that the bill has run about long enough,
calls upon the purchaser. "Me dear
boy" says the purchaser, "you amt liv-
ing up to your contract. If were TO
pay you the rest wouldn't owe it to
you, and the understanding was that
should owe it to you"
X. hao summoned cab and was
well on his way when the horrible sus-
picion that he had left his pocket-book
at home on the piano became q terri
BILE truth. Hi, coach ee," he exclaim-
ed, as he ncared his destination; "hold
on-pull up-Pvc dropped a fifty-franc
piece in the straw here. Wait till run
over to the shop opposite and get can
de-" So saying he sprang out of the
vehicle, and was neither surprised nor
displeased to see the coachman whip
up his horse and disappear round the
corner at 2I3i gait.
Since she passed into the thirties
Nine. A., charming and pious woman,
who would nottell lie for untold gold,
has devised an ingenious plan to battle
those who are SO indicate as to ask
her her age. "You see," she says,
frankly, "Mme. B. and the Countess de
c. and ! all grew up together, an to tell
you my age would be to disclose theirs.
1t makes no difference to me, but per-
haps they might think / had been in
discreet. Suppose you ask them"
The inquirer does SO, and the person he
interrogates replies eyes; dear Nine.
A. and went to the same convent and
she was only two months and four days
older than l. She will be twenty-six in
Octol er but she looks older than that,
| 4 "a Al. ~