The Red Cloud chief., 1878-01-10
JOSH BILLINGS PROVERBS.



The Academy 81 music "a. fairly
filed last evening by an audience A.
.embled Ia hear Josh Billing tHsnTy
W. shaw lecture on "Sand~ ich-s and
Specimen Brix." which consisted oi .x
tracts from his printed work. In"
lecturer. with his SPAR. t-n' form, IN
~t~llig-n, fare. black mu,;ach-. tull
gray heard and long. hla~k hair. dow
ing Ia hi. shoulders. appeared all over
the typical Yank~-. and hi ~apr~srsnc"
Was emphasized by the quiskical. fanl
Pry glance which he nov and ih"n cast
n, the audience with his brigh, ewes. as
be arranged the stand in order L" ob-
tain the best ligh, on the b-'k ~hich
he drew in a ,ls from h-n-aih
hi, coat.
Il do not pr"i-'~c to speak un the
lost arts he said. the rise and de-
cline q! the Roman Empirr. the pur-
chase ii the British Island bN S-cr-tsr,
Evarts. the third term. or If the we'll
settled fact that III. .igh, .po, takes the
seven. simply pr"pos. I" speak oi
everyday facts. by monographs. ESSAYS
and 4uips. The American wants hi>
hume. cau,tic on the h~alf->hsll. with
cayenne pepper. Will. the Engli,hman
Is satisfied In tax. his fun ,~mo,hrr-si in
mint sauce. and wal, till the neat day
tn digest il Blu, II ,"u want L" max"
IN American laugh or convince him.
YOU have 20, TAI do it quick. England
has more Wit. and America more hu-
NOR The lecturer then began his
readings. from which the following ~"-
l~ection, ar. given;
This lii. il lik. a game al card,
We mostl, play the hands dealt I" u,
and tn. credit j. not - much in win
ming as in PLAYING II poor hand we'll
when ! hear u man Dragging about
wha, he did last year and ahnu,
what he il going la do n-Nt YEAR. |
can tell pretty near wha, b. j. doing
now"
Don't d-spi>. Your poor relations.
They might get rich s"m. time, and
then il would bc 81 hard la "Nplsin
things
The reputation u man gets from his
ancestors wants about n much alter
ing Ia fit him ~ their clothes would "
There is no woman stationed ON the
face Of the earth who tries SCI hard Ia
do right and fails "f,.n.r than the av-
sragc mother-in-law.
An enthusiastic il an individual
who believes about four times ~ much
as he n prove, and n prov. ab"u,
four times as much rs anybody else
will believe
Failing in love j. like falling down
stairs: it's hard work Ia find u JUS,
how il was done
A man who has been waiting for
the las, fifteen wears for something Ia
turn up, is still in the same business. -
"A poodle is "A ~oman's pet. and
have seen some | would lik. TAI swap
livings with"
Mice can live anywhere comfort
ably but in a church,; they In, very
slowly in n church. This proves that
they can't live on religion any more
than a minister can
The worst tyrant in the world IL a
woman who is supcrionr TAI her hus-
band and lets everybody know it"
Love is like the measles. YOU cant
have il but once. and the later in life
We have it the tougher it goes with
US"
Great thinkers are not apt Ia be-
great whistlers. When "A man cant
think Of anything he generally begins
to whistle"
Inc hhaH soh Gan haN' to "'fA ON
a farm for nothing and board himself.
just about earns his wages"
.'Neatness, in nv opinion i. n 81
the virtues. have always CONSIDERED
il twin sister To chastity. but ions. work
so hard rs the victim Of ecstatic neat
ness. ] have seen a nca, per.oB who
would not let q weary fly rest long
enough on their best wall paper to take
breath, and who would chase a single
cockroach up and down stairs until his
legs were worn ,f."-Phii0dsiphi d
Times.