Weekly Trinity journal., 1878-07-13
THE 4TH, ALL ALONE.
RUSH CREEK. July 5th. 1878.

those Spread Eagle OIations so charac.
teristic Of our dear, oh dearly beloved
Country, from the sage and philosopher
down to the very commonest grass
hopper have heard the thunder Of
heavy artillery and the faint swapping
of the Chinese fire cracker have danced
with the wrinkled old maid have
whirled in the dizzy waltz with the
heart smasher and the juvenile have
drank enough good enthusiasm, if prop
erly and piously revenued to liquidate
the national debt, besides lot of con-
densed stuff sufficient to poison all the
| gophers in Livermore Valley but have
uniformly failed to enjoy 4th ofJuly.
So this 4th l concluded to sit quietly
in the cabin, all by myself, and just see
how the old thing would work as an ex-
pertinent. Now let us go back to the Sd
of the month for starter. About 10
O'Clock | was quietly seated on my porch
watching the graceful curling ofthe smoke
from my pipe and hearing laundering
noise up the mountain looked up and what
should | see but two horse load in
number coming down just as if the devil
had sent them on an errand thinks to
myself IN just step across to the road and
intercept those chappys and SEQ what the
deuce is up; on seeing me they came to
halt. They told me that they were the
acknowledged diabolical and inhamatory
agents for somebody's Indian Vegetable
Vinegar and wished me to sample some of
it. They then pulled squsw basket with
a handle 20 it on me, wanted to leave a
bottle with me and as time was money
with them and they were afraid it would
all leak out before they got to market with
it, they drove on, promising me bottle
on .heir return which must say they
honestly fulfilled. Now it won't do to
say Otto, Jake and Fred were of that
number in the wagon, because everybody
would know who l was talking about
At in the evening they came back, of
fering to bet that would be found exactly
in the same spot where they left me. As
| said they brought back the promised
bottle, along with Jake's pious regards.
| have got to say them fellows, ifI SAID
Otto, Billy and the County Clerk, people
would know who drove Junkans' team out
on the Sd. Parted with the boys and as |
walked across the potato patch with my
bottle of Jake's pious regards l looked
over my shoulder and saw who took to
be the editor of the JOURNAL sailing by
at about 2;40 locking like he had an eppo-
sition agency for the same vinegar, and
that he was afraid of it souring before he
could sample it around among the boys
Iarrived safely at the cabin and placing
the bottle of Jake's pious regards on tho
table, thinks l to myself, my dear Uncle
Samuel you are getting little advanced
in lifo, probably in your dotage, but never
theless to morrow III try and give you as
good hoist as lays in my bones to do
Well, to morrow-the 4th-came and the
first thing did after breakfast was to go
to the creek, dip up bucket of water
warm up some soup, wash clean shirt,
hang it out on the chapperel line and then
walking into the cabin and placing the
bottle of Jake's pious regards along side
the water bucket | said "Jacinto this is
the birthday of American Independence
it is proper, ah necessary, that you should
celebrate it in a gentemaniy and respecta-
bic manner; please step up and swallow
something" Which did Without fur
ther Invitation, then lit my pipe and squar-
ing myself IN chair prepared for com
fort and enjoyment. Aftera while says !
Jaeinto take something more" Jacin-
to did. | kept this lick up for quite a
while, and now just let me tell you what
was passing through my brain in the
mean time. First, l thought | would like
20 be rich, in fact | felt pretty we'll to do
in this world as it was. Then / thought
| would prefer wisdom So carefully
scanning tho past so as to judge of the
future, merely to see how wisdom would
work my first thought was the building
of King Solomon's temple. Now here
was a clear case Of brains fitted against
capital. Hiram furnished the brains and
Solomon & Co., the capital. Now, you
all know how that came out. Hiram died
an unnatural death and Solomon got away
with all the honor and glory and is even
quoted to day as the wisest man of his age
or any otherage, and I'll bet there is 500
smarter men in old Trinity to day than old
Solomon ever was. | have read some of
the sayings of this wise man. lie says
one man among a thousand have found
but ono woman among all this number
have | not found" Now think cipher
ed that out to-day. He found one man
among thousand who had tig disgust
on and was willing to stay at home or the
4th of July and celebrate like myself
but when he came to overhaul his thou
sand women 500 wanted to go to some pic
mic or barbecue and the other 500 wanted
to go to the junction City ball or some 9th
or place of amusement. | inrther thought
that / would like to be benevolent and
magnanimous ruler of some countrywide
not care much what country-and natural
ly enough went back TO oden times, when
Beeshazzer ruled mighty Babylon but
being about ia the same fix that he was
when he saw the hand writing on the wall
| looked around at the walls OF the cabin
and the first thing saw was the looking
glass. Thinks to myself just step up
and see how Jacnto looks probably it
would be good time TO have his picture
taken. About three steps landed me on.
on tho porch | had went completely
through it. Gathering myself up then
and there | made up my mind that any
man that could not tell an open door way
| from 6 by 8 looking glass, needed more
brains than anything else. Pulled a chair
and pillow under nae and went to sleep
with expect those same exalted notions