The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1878-07-27
All Sorts.
Only nine candidates for sheriff!

!, voung man who was sitting with
his sweetheart before the fire. "fes,
she responded, demurely, rts got
over being green.
The boatswain's pipe will not De
loaned to You to smoke. It's a mis-
take to inquire the time OF DAY by
the lafboard watch. Don't think
Won can steer boat because You
have been tiller Of the soil.
Being worsted by Sidney Smith
in an argument, q thick headed
souire took his revenge by exclaim-
ing, .'if had son who was an idiot,
I'd make him parson." "Very
probably said Smith, shut your
father was of different mind"
Dentist. to old lady about pur-
chasing some false teeth: "For mas
tication, my dear madam, they can
only be surpassed by nature your.
SELF Old lady: "Oh, laws, doctor!
| don't care anything about mastica-
ton if can only chaw with EN-"
"This sudden sound caused Blu
ford to start; the arm which had
been about to hurl Arthur away re,
Taxed, quitting their hold OF him and
Rosalte's boy fell and disappeared
from the assassin's sight" Begin
ing of sensation story in New
York weekly. -
"CaptaiH we are entirely out OF
ammunition said an orderly ser
oeant to his commander on field
day. "Wnatl entirely out OF ammu-
milton % exclaimed the Captain.
ayes. entirely out" was the reply.
"rhen cease firing" peremptoriiy
said the Captain.
"Make you coat, sir Z" said
! suspicious tailor to suspected GUS
toner. "Oh, yes, sir, with tne
, greatest of pleasure "ihere' JUST
Stand in that position, please, ana
look right upon that notice while 4
take YOUR measure" Customer
r roads the notice: "Terms cash" 5
: An aged man said: of husbands
only had any sense they'd never
! have any trouble with disobedient
wives. never did, an have been
: married nigh onto fifty years.
y .What is Your secret Z" asked
e friend. "Why, always tell my wiz
i to do just as she pleases, an SUI
r. never fails to do it,"
Or An exchange says that "doinl
4 business without advertising Is nN'
wiukinc at a pretty girl with greer
re gouules on But there is some lit
lie fIe difficulty about this statemen,
u In the first place, man who doesn'
of advertise doesn't do any business t
of sneak of, and pretty girls are not
n the habit of wearing green goggies'
~ Snow" they said to her, "you ca
y oo in and see him but rememDt
. That he is very sick with heart Oh
m ease. and don't say a word that WI
n trouble him" Then she walked !
- sat down on the edge of chair, al
.e remarked cheerfully, as she shot
we her head. "Ah-ah !-m!--sad ali
We it9 Thought I'd just run in, eau
they said there wuz no KNOWN ho
soou YOU might drop of"
Tho A rood old farmer found hims
,rp one day with his hired boy at :
md other end of the row, when the III
the ner-born sounded. Anxious to ma
ye- avery step count, lie commenced
iew hoe his way back, saying TO the .
.ew as he did so, Thomas do you e'
rbe think about dyingf' YES" .
mt Tom. 81 think shall die pre-
ion soon. if don't have some dinner.
ent. youup Smith was walking
the with the idol of his heart, the OF
evening, and they chose the fav
tied ire resort of lovers, the goat past
per near the dam. While admirlng
ana, falls and getting their noses 7
g q ened by the North wind, she ours
Hate out raptuously, "lsn't tnat
age splendid 7" She nearly tainted az
90. when Smith answered that he wa
ting nsed to hearing young ladies sw
:, 0, and another engagement was uro
sn1 off.
100 A colored man, employed q
70 a deck hand on steamboat, was r.
~. ing around town, and inqul
where the polls were. "Polls' 20
repeated the citizer, "why, tn
or ID mo election going on now" II
IS, at .hain't7r "No, SIR" The man
Essay for moment looking greatly
n ny appointed, and turned for the
reas- with the remark: "And now de
,. per gramme is to find dat sleek y
the man who said dey was paying
sisve, dollars apiece for voters"
+. for He was level full, and as he b
inst. ed a South Boston ear, he renai
atify- "Wazzer name that c'ductor tot
mt. as pointing vaguely at We
rreas- ssDon't know was the reply. :"
.o;n 10 told me 90 takernap, Ante