The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1878-08-21

They worried me, and so / worried back.
That's the way. Signing like patience on a
monument isn't bit of use. was too
healthy to go into consumption, like little
stupids in books. / ate, and laughed, and
was disagreeable; made myself perfectly
hateful oh / did, and IL got my way
Still, good deal of it stuck and ranked;
and wasn't sure but that after all Emily
was right. and he would require tight hand
over HIM.
Long before we were married he gave up
all his old ways and his old haunts and went
into business, astonishing every one (but
me) with the ability and determination he
brought into his new career. If he had been
prince in a fairy tale, with three magic
gifts, he could not have got on better. He
hai three magic gifts-love for me, and
more love for me, and more love again. So
he said. looking me in the face this time
that happy day when papa could stand 1T no
longer, and had his consent wOrTied-yet
admit there is no other word for it-worried
out of him.
The first six months of our married life
passed like a dream. Imagine a husband
who is lover, and a dear friend who Is
both; and that would be my Gerald. was
so happy; till one miserable Wednesday
when he came home at 2 o'clock and said he
must start at to catch the steamer which
was to sail the next morning from Liverpool
for New York. Take me with you"
cried. Manlike, his first thought was pack
ing up, and he told me | could not be ready
in time. Then he gave another reason
(which has just gone out for ride on her
pony-biess her. and had to give in to this,
for 1t was November, when the sea is always
awfully rough. He looked pale and wor-
ried, and left me full half an hour before
there was any necessity to CO. And he
would not let me see him off. He hated to
be seen off, he said, and was almost cross
about it, "a month will soon pass, he
said. "a month"; 1 almost screamed; ;
why, you told me just now your business
would only take few days" mo more it
viii" he answered, "but the voyage out and
home will take twenty" 'Oh, Gerald, I
pleaded why can't you write or telegraph
what's the use of the Atlantic cable they
make so much fuss about, If you must go all
that way yourself?'' 81 have written, and
have cabled," he replied, little gloomiiy,
land it's no use, Dimples, (that was his pet
name for me; wasn't it a pretty one?
must go myself" and he went.
He went away for a month. and he stayed
three. Business was going wrong. What
business? He never told me. That's the
way with men. Suppose we want money
and say it's for dress; they'd ask directly,
What dress? what do you want 1T for?
what sort do you want? why won't what
you have do? what Is it TO be made OF? what
color will it be?' and all sorts of other foolish
questions about what they never can under
stand; but let us ask what business" and
they laugh or get grumpy.
He returned at last looking old and care
worn, and from that moment his habits
changed. Time was when he would often
rush home in a bansom at o'clock, and call
up the stairs, "Holloa, Dimplesl Nothing
TO do; get on your things and come out for
drive" Now it was SIX or seven before he
showed his face, and then he would have a
horrld black bag full of papers, over which
he sat half the night. And he turned so
stingy, though every one said he was coin
ing money. When baby came he bright
ened up, and / must say was very tender
and thoughtful, until 1 was about again.
Then he went back to his old ways. Always
at the office-always thinking business. All
me- l remember once how he put down that
Emily Dodd. She had found US sitting
alone in the conservatory at Lady Var
soviaua's ball, and said in her sneering way,
''Oh dearl here's Gerald Carruthers making
love to his wifep' ''Why not?" he replied,
not moving his arm; 81 love my wife much
more dearly than ever Iloved Mabel Mostyn,
| and loved her dearly" 1 was so proud
He never made love to me now. He left
me alone to think, and 1 thought of other
things Emily had said. Among others she
told me when was fretting about him dur
| ing that voyage, that he was sure to have a
/ splendid time of il on board, because some
body's blondes-I don't remember whose; a
| lot of painted burlesque creatures-where
| his fellow passengers; she had seen their
| names IL the newspapers: Kitty this, and
| Polly that, and Susie some ore else, who bad
been talked of in connection with him be-
| fore we were engaged. l did not mind at
| first, but when he altered so, and would not
say why he went to America, or what sort OF
| business kept him there, l accused him
point blank He got red and white and
/ oolroH mo hnuv daro. and not
is not wise to ask wife how she dares, when
| affection is at the bottom of her daring, and
so let him know.
Jealousl or course wasl 1 was horribly
| jealous. l know all you can say about jeal-
| ousy. Papa preached. mamma scolded,
Aunt Jane sighed, and Emily had her little
/ say, of course. II was wicked twas foolish,
| it was undignified. Pride ought to coHquer
it, self respect to ignore it, religion 90 root 1t
| out The old story Let woman swallow
a teaspoonful OF salt, and argue her out Oh
| being thirsty; and thou you may go ana
persuade one who has loved not 10 De leal-
ons They ALI had their remedies, as though
| il were cold in the head. l was to be more
| loving to him; 1 was to treat him coldly; |
was to NOPE, and show him how 1t grleved
| me; 1 was to hirt, and prove that l did not
care; 1 was to insist upon an explanations; L
was on no account to atlude to the subject;
| was to bear it; | was to resent it; was to
| DlOW nOLs was 10 DlOW COlUs L was VI DlOW
up-and so on. Papa and the rest sided
with Gerald, when they saw how right had
been about his steadying down; and yet they
sided against me when / showed how he was
relapsing! II was right as a young. limo
cent, inexperienced gIrl, why should they
contradict me when l was a wretched but
experienced wife? There was no common
sense or logic about them.
MY dears we went on from bad to worse,
| till one horrid day, about year after his
trip to America and back-shali ever for
get itl-when / returned from walk with
baby, and found that he had been home and
packed up his bag, leaving message-not a
note, but a message If you please, with a ser
vaut-that he would not be back for two
days. / went up to his room, by instinct
SUI ppose, and there in the fire place, crum-
pied up, saw one of those horrid yellow
telegram papers. Something told me that it
would be the clue TO his sin and my dis
grace. 1 opened it any my head swan as
read this
"susie, Baby, Immediately, Liverpool"
Could fair words tell the tale of horror
more plainly? Susie and her baby would be
at Liverpool, where his presence was requir-
od irnmadiatalv. at IivprnOOl where the