The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-12-07
How to Live to Be Ninety.

Mr.. Rufus Wethersby Hicks, of Osh-
kosh, is now ninety years of age, and in
robust health. In response to my in
quiry as to the methods by which he
has managed to keep himself in such
condition, he has written me the follow
ing letter, which publish for the bene-
fit of the public. Mr. Hicks SAYS:
lin the first place | have always
been careful to sleep with plenty of air
in my bedroom. regard this a mat
ter of vital Importance. The practice
Of sleeping in vacuum will gradually
undermine the strongest constitution.
Ihave always found great advantage,
too, in sleeping in bed, and not on the
washstand or across the towel-rack.
My grandfather used to say that the
towel-rack was even more dangerous
to sleep on than the mantel-piece.
upon rising in the morning al
ways jump at once into the bath-tub,
no matter how cold the weather is; and
I sit there thinking whether l shall
turn the water on or not Generally l
conclude not to. But the exercise in
climbing in and out of the tub does me
much good. Before breakfast | pass
an hour or so in parsing. l have be-
cOme SO skillful now that l can tell an
sdverb clear across the street, and no
smount of disguise can hide personal
pronoun from me. Sometimes, when
1 weary of grammar, take quiet
game of PUSSY wants a corner" or
eractice looking cross-eyed at the clock.
This last amusement always gives me
an appetite.
"But a moderate breakfast is best.
A man doesn't want more than two or
three Watermelons, hind quarter of
bucket Ga small buckeD of pickles for
his first meal. Eat slowly. Allow at
least minute to watermelon, and
where gunwads are introduced in the
hash, be sure to spit out the stones.
On. B.-This is not clear, but Mr.
Hicks undoubtedly means well.-M.
ADELER)
CATER eating, the system needs a
rest. 60 off to some quiet place, like
the rain-water cistern, or the chimney
fiue, and try to compose my mind.
Sometime l sing. 1t is admirable for
strengthening the lungs, and the Chin
ney-fue develops the sound wonderful
ly. Last Wednesday [ sang Home,
Sweet Home up the flue so effectively
that it brought out the fire company,
and threw Mrs. Hopkinson's hired girl
into fits. IN. B.-The old mans mind
appears to be wandering here, but he is
evidently trying to tell the truth.-M.
ADELER.)
"a little later in the day you want
exercise to stimulate the circulation.
Sometimes l carry the piano up and
downstairs two or three times; or l
open and shut my umbrella seventeen
or eighteen hundred times, or brush my
hair for a couple of hours, or 90 out
and dig potatoes with lead pencil. /
used to spank the baby. but have no
baby now small enough to spank. My
youngest child is forty-seven, and has
red hair, and is in the Nebraska Legis-
lature. On. B.-If he is in the Legis-
lature it is positively certain that a
spanking would do him good. But 1
do not understand that reference to red
hair. 1t is not pertinent to the subject.
M Az
81 never touch whisky. 1t is poison
Gus. No man who uses it can have long
life. Who can estimate the woe that it
has brought to the human race. No,
no! avoid the hideous liquid as you
would fiery serpent. Not one drop of
whisky has passed my lips for ninety
one years. On. B.-The old man is
only ninety; but let that pass. NJ. Az
and not drop shall. Nothing would
induce me to touch it. What want is
little old apple brandy, mellow and
ripe; possibly with a dash of gin in it;
and even of this l never drink more
than two quarts between breakfast and
supper. AS for tobacco, well, when |
was ten years old l vowed l would
never smoke another cigar or chew an
other plug of tobacco as long as | lived.
have smoked pipe and chewed fine
cut exclusively.
"And now, in my old age, l look
back upon the years of well spent
life, and as l wheel myself about my
garden in my wheelbarrow, looking at
the logarithmus growing upon my vines
and watching the propositions climbing
upon the trellises, basking in the sun
shine, while the pelicans gambol about
the"
But this is enough. Mr.. Hicks is
gradually ceasing to be lucid. Pelicans
neUer gambol; and | have some doubts
about that wheelbarrow performance
but the reader who wishes to live till
ninety and become a hoary old Teller,
may study Hicks epistle possibly with