The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-12-20
Facts about Methuselah.

What tremendous boyhood old Methu.
selah had He died at the rather advanced |
age of $50 years, about 800 years more than |
a mans span of life. At that rate when he |
was two hundred years old he about eaquqed |
an ordinary lad of sixteen. He was thirty |
or forty before his parents bought him rat
tie to play with, and didn't have the mea-
sles and other infantile diseases until he was
over one hundred. He was in no sort of a
hurry about these things, as he had so far to
60 We imagine that re was rather deli
cate child to begin with, as most people
were who live to great age. We can inag.
Inc his mothers anxiety with regard to his
delicate constitution, telling Mrs. Brown
across the way, on hi, iinetiath birthd ".
that she was afraid she would never be able
TO raise that child Generation. of men iy-
cd and passed away while he was going
around in petticoats, and he almost CEN
tenarian before he got his frat boots His
father used to lick him when he was $50 for
robbing n neighbor's watermelon patch.
Young Methuseah was probably in the
vicinity of 100 years old when he was first
sent to school. We can imagine him sitting
On the low bench, learning his a-b-abs,
among the great grand children of the peo-
lie who bagan life when he did He was
mischievous, of course-all boys are,no mat
ter what their age 1--WE experience a mild
friskness ourselves occasionally ,.and had to
be punished for it.
William Henry Methuselah stand upn
says the teacher, catching him in the very act
of placing bent pin in a seat where school
mate was about to sit down. what do you
mean by such conduct as thisY
Young Metheselah begins to snifile and
wipe his eyes with the corner Of his Jack
et
One would think continued the teacher
stenly, that you wasn't over seventy-fiye or
eighty years old by the way you behave
Instead Of that you have already celebrated
your first observation-disclosures young man
in fact, You had ought to be ashamed of
YOURSELF
whenever circus came to town, with
children half price on its bills, young Me-
thuseah must have experienced difficulty in
making the ticket-seller understand that he
\ was entitled to go in on half-priced ticket.
particularly after he got along towards his
two hundreth year. But he probably did it.
Boys are enterprising and persistent whese a
| circus is concerned. And we will bet that
Methnseiah, in his youthful days, could ac-
simulate as much old iron as the next boy.
and lay by for the coming show.
When the youngster got into his teens
say from 200 to 800 years old-he probably
did as other gentlemen Of tender age do, went
around with the girls. 1t must have been
little embarrassing to him, after beauing a
young lady about a spell, taking her to con-
certs, parties, balls, etc, to discover that she
was great-great. great great grand
child of some old friend of his fathers, but
these things were inevitable under the pecu-
liar and exceptional character ofthe circum.
stances. They could hardly be otherwise
There is no record to show that any women
lived in his time to an age that would begin
to compare with his She wouldn't have
ACKNOWLEDGED to anything over forty had
she lived twice the age of Methuselah. THAI
is The kind of 4 hair.pin a woman is.
Employing the proportion of twenty on,
to seventy to MethuseIah's year, we fine
that he was a minor until he was 27O Y, ar
old. II the laws regarding minors were en-
forced in his day, young Mc'hu.elah mus
have been run ont Of a billiard room anC
shut out of bars for over two centuries AnC
what a sensation there must have been Great
ed when he stepped out to deposit his frs
vote. OF co urse he voted for all the presi
dents, from Washington Whom he remem
bers shaking hands with down, All mel
did that. And when he got to be along il
years, say 800 or such matter, he could 81
and tell the boys about the hard winter o
32and the panic of '37,and the food of 80
aud the hard cider campaign of 40, aud al
that sort of thing.