The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-06-20
SENSE. AND NONSENSE.


killed or disabled soldiere. se
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SENSE. AND NONSENSE.
A CENTURY PLANr-Putting 500 in
savings bank.
THE will-o' -wisp has never been con-
tested in court. ,. -.--
FoURTH-oF-JULY orators are prepar-
ing to hold forth.
MEN who work are the best leaders
for working men.
+ MORO for q beautiful woman asleep
Handsome is as handsome doze. =
TINE, if improved, is wealth. and
should not be squandered.-Iosoa State
Register. :.
EDISON has been asked to invent q,
photographic gas-meter that will speak
the truth.
AN exchange says many a plant is
ruined by too much soaking. So is
many man.
A DOCTOR who strikes out from the
shoulder is liable to be arrested for
maul-practice.-N. o. Rcayuse.
THE culprit eyed the rope that swung
Above him with . smile;
And whispered, just before he hung.
''This IL the moose spring Style"
-HawE-Eye.
Two YOUNG men in Lancaster, Pa,
rolled ten-pins thirteen hours on q
stretch. In that time they finished 1873
games.
1t is good rule never to forget the
kindly deeds which others do to you,
and never to remember those YOU do
for them.
A MAN is obliged to die before his
will amounts to anything, but that of q
woman is always in force.-Cincinnati
Breakfast Table.
The man who does not wish to be
bothered when he is busy is the one who
likes to bother busy people when he
himself has nothing to do.
The more educated man is the less
comfort he has. Compare yourself
with the wooden man in front of the
tobaccOnist's, who never requires q
new hat.-Graphic.
A PLACARD in the window of pat
ent-medicine vendor in Paris reads as
follows: '.The public are requested
not to mistake this shop for that of
another quack just opposite
If man becomes your friend all at
once, not for any good reason, but ap-
parehtly from caprice, the chances are
that when his present mood is over he
will all at once leave you.-N. Y. Her.
aid.
IT matters not what kind of a dog q
man may be leading home with string;
it may be q blue-and- gray cur or
brindle bull pup, yet he always says
with pride that the dog is half black
and tan.
PLEASE take notice that you never
read of breach-of-promise suit in
which the mother doesn't seem to
know much more about the case than
the girl. Keyholes were not made in
vain. Detroit Free Press,
WHAT pity all our consciences are
not as tender as that of the youthful
truant who was overtaken by q hail
storm, and who hurried home in terror
and told his mother that God was aw-
full angry and had been "frowing stones
ut hin" IN. =. Herald.
JUST at this season of the year the
barriers of human nature seem to break
down, and great philosophers and high
toned poets may be seen kneeling down
and anxiously wondering whether that
pig-weed is q cucumber or q climbing
bean.-Detr0H Free Press.
The rice crop in the PHILIPPINE ISL
ands this year is total failure. This
is depressing news to the boarder, who,
remembering how little rice it takes to
make five gallons of soup when crops
n, II -, S~~1r ~k
the amount of work that will be forced
upon one grain now.-Ha,oE-Eye.
The following conversation lately
occurred in q New England railway
station: Pat" Plat is the fare to Put
nam?'' Agent Putnam in Massa-
chusetts or Connecticut?' Pat" Plat
is the fareP' Agent-"S5t to Putnam,
Mass; $8 to Putnam, Conn.," Pat
"Well, bedad, Orll take the chapestv
Ed. ..:--
An old Scotch lady had an evening
party, where young man was present
who was about to leave for an appoint
ment in China. As he was exceeding
ly extravagantin his conversation about
himself, the old lady said, when he was
leaving, "Tak guild care o. yourself,
my man, when ye're AVA; for, mind
ye, they eat puppies in Cheena?'
A SUBSCRIBER asks ~ How to scald q
goose" There are several methods.
Perhaps the best way would be to wait
until some evening when the goose
comes around to serenade your daught-
or, and while he Is in the middle of
"Sweet byland-by," pour kettle of
boiling water on his head from the Sec
Ond-stOry window N0rvtst0scn Herald.
A MINER in the Black Hills, writing
to friend in this city, tells Of hor-
rible reminder of the fearful snow
storms of last winter, and of the perils
of those who were caught out and lost
their way on the plains. He says that
recently, while he and two others were
crossing the country, they came upon
the skeleton of horse, within which
was the skeleton of q man, with the
grinning skull looking out at them from
between the ribs of the animal, like a
prisoner peering through the bars of
his cell. Tho two skeletons told the
whole story. The man had killed his
horse, cut him open and crawled inside
| of him, thinking thus to escape per-
ishing of cold, but the flesh of the ami
NAL froze solid, and the man was as
much of q prisoner as if he had been
shut in by walls Of iron. The wolves
and carrion birds had stripped the
greater part of the flesh from both
skeletons. The miner concludes his
description by saying: :" It is q sight
I shall never forget. 1 can see it now
whenever I close my eyes," Virginia
CSty (Nev.) Estex0yist.
~-.-.1- :. - 4eS.-----
A Boy With . Heart.
THE other day a bit of a boy called at
the side door of a good looking Cass
farm residence and told such a sorrow
full story that thelady Of the house was
not stingy in throwing provisions into
his basket. Happening to look into the
front yard after few minutes she saw
the strange boy mixed uPwith her three
or four childrens and she called out:
boy, what are you doing here?''
s.Eeediu' ,these half-starved chill