davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The daily intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Territory [i.e. Wash.]) 1876-1881, 1878-01-18

PARsoN W. was the Congregational
minister at A., two or three generations
ago. On one occasion he was called on
to marry rustic couple. According to
his custom, he began with, "Please join
your right hands" The groom, little
confused. lets go his grasp, and with
his left hand takes the brides right.
"Your right hands. Please join your
right hands, The groom thinks mo.
ment. lets 60 his grasp again. and turn
ing around, seizss the bride with both
hands. her right with his left, her left
with his right. and exclaims. Now
I've got her."
The daily intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Territory [i.e. Wash.]) 1876-1881, 1878-01-18

WHEN a man returns home at night
and kisses his wife with more than
ordinary tenderness, she may be pretty
certain that he has been in mischief.
The daily intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Territory [i.e. Wash.]) 1876-1881, 1878-01-18

take off his hat when he goes to bed. it
Is about time our domestic institutions
were overloaded and definitely re-
modelled.
Nothing makes q man feel more des-
olate than to return home from a fash.
ionable wedding, and have his wife yell
at him as soon as he gets inside the
door: Come. now, jerk off them rne
duis as quick as you can and fetch re
IN scuttle OF coal"
There is q world for contemplation in
observing young girl gazing upon the
tender petals of the rose her lover has
just given her. and then looking at the
same woman five years after, as she
stands before Q huckster cart and tells
the owner she wouldn't give five cents
for such head Of cabbage if she had
to 60 without it all her life .
Mr. and Ms. Mulcahy lived ON q
farm. They were shrewd and thrifty
and had the reputation of being "clQse."
Finally Mrs. MulcaEy sickenel, And
was about to die. Finding herself
nearing the emu, SnS expressed desire
to pu. things in order before that event
occurred, and old Tom prepared to
listen.
Tom" said Mrs Mulcahy. there's
Mrs. Smith, up at the crossing. she
owes me $50 for butter; see you get
it,"
'Sinsible to the last. my dear; sinsi-
BILE to the last" said old Tom, "I'll get
it."
There's Mrs. Brown up at the Creek
she owes me $3.50 for chickens"
"Ah look at that, now, for min /;
she forGets nothing"
"And there's Mrs. Jones in the viii
lage. she owes me 81 80 for milk"
"D'ye hear that. sinsible to the last;
sinsible to the last Go on, my dear"
"And-and-
"Yes:"
"And Mrs Roberts, at the toll gate,
owe her"
"Ah! poor dears poor desr!" broke in
old Tom, hastily; "how ner moind does
be wandering Sure we've allowed her
to talk too much entirely, SO we have"
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

TUESDAY, June 18.-In the Senate.
resolution was passed extending the session
until six O'Clock p. m. on the 10Th. Several
amendments to the Sundry Civil Appropria-
ton bill were agreed to, one Of them being for
$5.5OO,OO0 to pay the award of the Halifax
Fishery Commission, and the bill a. amended
was passed. The House non-concurring in
these amendments, . Conference Committee
was subsequently appointed. A resolution
was submitted, and referred to the COMMITTEES
on Privileges and Elections, to allow Senator
Matthews to testify before the Potter Inves-
lief Of settlers on the public lands was passed.
extending the provisions of the act allowing set.
tiers who had their crops injured by 9rass-
hoppers to leave their homesteads temDO-
rarily for the purpose Of obtaining sustenancc.
80. The Senate resolution, declaring that the
treaty With China. allowing Unrestricted i'm
migration to this country, should be modified.
and calling the attention Of the President to
the subject, was c0ncurred in BY the House.
The Senate amendments to the bin to repeal
the Resumption act were non concurred In
l4o to los, less than the necessary two-thirds
In the affirmative and the bill thus failed of
passage. The Senate resolution extending
the time for anal adjournment until six D. M,
ON the l9ths. was agreed to. A bill was
passed providing for judicial ascertainment
OF claims against the United States. A motion
70 suspend the rules and pass the bill to ne
pea! that section OF the Resumption net which
authorizes the sale Of United States bondG for
me purposes Of resumption, and to provide
that United States notes shall be receivable
ior duties on imports, was rejected-l14 to
liS. moi the necessary two-t thirds in the affirm
propriatiDg 10000 for the expenscs Of tRc
Presidential Election Investigating Committee
was cOncurred In. A Conferences C0mmittee
was ordered and appointed o. the Hundry
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
CuriOsities Of Etiquette.

THE rules of etiquette are as old as
society and as varied as are the races
of people who inhabit the earth. As
rule, probably, it may be safely set
down that the ruder the people the
more absolute are the codes Of man.
ners. The punctilious etiquette OBJ
served in Spain, where q Monarch
hardly feels at liberty to put on o gar
ment without the permission of the
Chamberlain, has long been the wonder
of less formal people. It is not SO very
many years since Spanish ladies were
not allowed to eat at the same table
with their husbands. But this fine
breeding is outdone by the Bulgarians.
The newly-married wife in Bulgaria
dares not speak to her husband Tor 9
month or more. The prohibition used
to last nine months. She is relieved
from the obligation of silence when her
lord presents her with gift. Among
the Caffres of South Africa the women
are not allowed to mention the name
of their father-in-law, and they must
hide themselves when they meet their
sons-in-law. This delicacy about call
ing names is extended to the par
liamentary practice Of civilized
peoples. In the Legislature it is the
height Of improperly to call an honor
able member by his right name, al
though the custom is found to be very
convenient one in ordinary life. In
New Caledonia the names of natural
objects are given to children; but It the
child dies the relatives must no longer
call the natural object by its former
name. A new appellation has to %
invented for use in that particular iam-
lily. The custom gives . remarkaDle
variety to the New Caledonlan dialect,
and tasks the invention Of parents who
are go unfortunate as to lose their of
snrine. On tabu days. in the South
Sea Islands, anyone who makes . noise
must die. This regulation is As bad as
any of the Connecticut blue laws. But
there is hardly any form of etiquette
that has survived to do duty in polite
society but has it's origin in some Of the
Qrosser observances Of antiquity.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

way. Now, no body-snatcher AZ has
any respect for hissef or his calling I'll
do thing of that sort. There's plenty
of material lying round and rotting, Just
now, sir, and no friends to claim it,
How long have you been at the
businessp''
Its about 'leven years since I first
begun it. I begun with Old Cunny.
First he paid me three dollars a head;
that was while was learning. Then
he gave me eight dollars apiece, and
finally decided to quit him and 60 by
myself, and SO he said he'd give me
halt, and then we worked together on
shares till he died."
"Do you make it regular business,
then?''
time"
"What do you get for subjectsa''
eve used to get about twenty-five
dollars apiece for them. but lately the
price somehow has got down to fifteen
dollars. The professors buy some sub
iects for themselves, and they most al
WAYS get them for about fifteen dol
lars"
elbow do you usually get the bod
ies?''
"Well, we generally 60 out two to-
gether and 60 to burying-ground.
We 90 to the 'pOor lots the Potter's
Field, and when we can find any fresh
graves we get the boGies.''
"You don't get them from the parts
where the better class of people are
buried?'
"No. Lots of times Cunny and
have been out together and we'd find o
fresh grave on large lot, and Cunny
would always say, Come long, honey,
we won't take that When we'd come
through to part where the graves
were close together, and we knew it
was the poor lot where the people with
out any friends are buried, then we'd
dig down to the coffin, break it open
and put a rope around the neck and
pull the body out. / don't do that way
now, though, for it is just as easy 10
throw all the dirt out. Then, after
throwing it out, generally get down
and open the coffin and take the body
by the waist and lift it out to my part
ner. He takes it and gently runs a
knife down the back and rips the
clothes of, and lets 'cm drop down.
Then we slips the head into a sack,
press the knees up against the chest,
and slip the body in and tie the sack.
That's all there is of it,
How do you enjoy the work?'
"Well, it wasn't very pleasant at
first, of course, but anyone gets used to
it. 1t is for the good of science, and 1
think it is just as right and honorable
as for the man what does the dissec-
ton. want to say one thing, though,
and that is that the colored people have
'cused me of robbing the graves in
their graveyards. never have done
so. l have took up good many bod
les of colored people wot was buried in
the poor lot, but never any other"
"How many do you suppose you
have furnished in your experience as a
body-snatcher?'
"Maybe 500. 1 got about forty last
winter, but it wasn't very good win
ter for it, though. Cincinnati En-
qazirer.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

Mrs. Myra Clark Gaines is at present
apicturesque feature of Washington So
ciety. At seventy, she is a small, deli
cate woman, with bright, restless.
black eyes, clear complexion, auburn
hair, without single thread of silver
in it. (She wears wig.) Wears
pale blue and lavender bonnets of a de-
cided scoop-shape, but otherwise
dresses in good taste; she says she can
out-walk, talk, or laugh any woman in
the United States, and expects to live
fifty years longer, but disclaims any in
tention of levying upon the land in the
moon. Says when she gets her dues
she will build hotel for working
women that will put Stewards all in
the ohade. She speaks in tender tones
of her !" sainted husband, Gen. Gaines,"
demiscd forty years ago, and believes
she is carrying out his wishes in giving
the greedy lawyers plenty to do.-Cns-
cago Tribune.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
The Modern Rifle.

Beyond all contradiction, the in
creased power of the defense is to be
ascribed to the perfection of the mod
ern rifle. Its long range, its accuracy,
the rapidity with which it can be load
ed, have made it the most formidable
weapon that ever was invented. Walls
whose defenders are armed with it
may be literally said to be unap-
preached by an enemy. Its fire is
perfectly desolating. Nothing can live
on the exterior slopes of works when
they are swept by its bullets. The
logged courage of the Turks has been
the means of demonstrating what mod
ern rifles can do. We believe that in
the attack on the lines of Plevna on
the Cars birthday everything the
bravest soldiers could do was done by
the Russians in their endeavors to take
the redoubts. Not only did they fail,
but hardly any of them Tin some cases
not many got away unwounded. 1t
is worth remembering that it was in
the darkness, after the close of that
eventful birthday. that Skobeleff sue
ceeded in getting into the Gravitza
and the other two redoubts. One rea-
son of his success was that the worm
out Turks, thinking the struggle over
for the day, had, except small guard,
retired from the works. But we think
that probably another reason may be
adduced-namely, that the guard which
was left on the alert could not see the
enemy at a distance. and therefore
could not take aim. 1t is hardly too
much to suppose that, had there been
light to distinguish the assailants at a
moderately long range, the men on
duty could have checked the attack
until their comrades could have re-
turned to their posts. AS a corollary
on this observation, we may remark
that in future when assaults are given
it will be absolutely necessary return
to the old practice of delivering them
before daybreak. This practice not
long ago was condemned, it being
thought that the risk which the storm
ers ran of missing their way or making
other mistakes in the darkness more
than counterbalanced the advantage
that might be gained by stealing un-
seen up to the scene of operations.
Now that the scene of operations will
be swept by the deadly rifle, the dark
ness will afford the only chance of at
lacking with success.-Blacksoood' s
Magazine.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
A Berlin dispatch of tho morr;n. .,

A Berlin dispatch of the morning of
the 29d says the Plenipotcntiarics Of England,
Russia and Austria had settled the Bulgarian
question by fixing upon tho. Balkans q its
boundary of Northern Bulgaria, and giving
to Turkey the right to fortify the Balkan
Passes, and to garrison fortified places; Sofia
to be included in Rumelia, and Varna i'm Bull
garia; Turkey to retain Burgas; the northern
frontier of Montenegro and the boundaries of
Servia to be restricted, these countries receiy-
ing compensation on the south. It was fur.
Their stated that the cession of Bosnia and Her
xcgovina to Austria had been agreed upon.
A st. Petersburg dispatch of the Esd
says there was much excitement there over the
fact that Turkey was to be allowed to garri-
son the Balkan Passes.
A London dispatch of the 2cd says
Austria had demanded of the Porte 1000, 600
forms for maintaining the Bosnian refugees,
or, in lieu Of money, the cession of Kick, SUIT
torina, Trebinie. Smoski and Sivino.
In the European Congress, on the
Gath, the right of the Sultan to place ON the
Roumelian frontiers whatever number of
troops he might deem necessary for security
was admitted in principle, but at the came
time Russia proposed q series of amendments
which England refused to accept. The Con-
gress also fixed nine months as the term to be
allowed Russia for withdrawing her troops
from Eastern Roumelia and Bulgaria.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
Good Grit,

At the commencement of the present
term of the medical college, young
student from the West started for Keo-
kuk to attend. Arriving at Abba, he
found his means would not be sufficient
and he footed it the rest of the way to
this city. He paid in full for his tu-
ition, and then had just 81 left. Three
of these were laid out for q quarters
rent for q room, in which was nothing
but his books. No bucket, no stove,
no furniture, no bed, not even blan-
ket, and only 81 to live on. In
a month or SO, he procured blan-
ket, and considered himself fortunate.
His money was laid out in corn meal,
and twice q week he would 60 down to
the pork house and make up lot of
corn bread, bake it and bring it to his
room, and on corn bread alone he has
been subsisting during the entire term.
He has worked and earned IS since
he has been here, and on this and the
seven he had left, after paying his col
lege fees, $12 in all, he has subsistcd.
During all this time no one has
known how he subsisted, and the only
thing that has been noticed
about him is that he is one of the
brightest students in the class, and
bids fair to graduate with the highest
honors. His condition would not have
been found out had it not been that a
gentleman rented room in the same
building in which the students was To-
Gated, and by making his acquaintance
ascertained how he had been living.
The student is a bright, frank, tear
less fellow, who asks no favOrs, has
paid in advance for everything he has
got, is not afraid of difficulties, and if
he proves not a bright and shining
light in his professional he is not
heard from as an eminent physician and
surgeon ere many years roll around,
we lose our guess.-Keokuk (LoDc)
Tan ofsfsIfsnaa
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

An Enquirer reporter talked yester-
day with Charles KeetOn, who frankly
acknowledges his profession Of body
snatchin2, and justifies himself by say
ing that his labors are bestowed in the
interests of science.
"How long have you been in this
businessP'' asked the reporter.
about eleven years, sir,'' said Kee-
ton, AZ he sat up in bed-f0r he is now
confined to his room from hemorrhage
of the lungs. II began with Mr.. Cum
ningham, odd Cunny,' they called
him, eleven years ago, and have fol!
lowed the business every winter since
that"
"Does it pay pretty welle''
"Not now. 1t used to pay, for we
got q good price for subjects, but there
isn't much money in it now"
"Why don't they pay SO much nowr'
"Well, sir, the fact isl don't want
to say nothing against anybody, but it
pears to me that somebody ain exact
IL doing the far thing by the pr fession
If subject-gathering. / don't 'cuse
none of the doctors themselves OF 60
ing out to get stiffs, but there's some
thing wrong somewhere. The old
demonstrators of anatomy at the col
leges wouldn't have stopped to such q
thing either, but think things are
changed now. went to the demon
strat0r of one college, amt going to
call any names-in March. and asked
him how, many subjects they we're GO
ing to want for the spring session, and
he told me he thought they wouldn't
want any more, that they had enough
ON hand. Well, you see, / knew better
than that, and my private 'pinion is
that that ERE demonstrator gets his
subjects in some queer sort Of way, /
don't say that he goes out for 'em him
sell, but r. he doesn't he must have
some NO count men that would ~ soon
rob the grave Of party we'll connected,
and with lots Of friends, - any other
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
The Old Nan and the Boys.

AFTER two boys had been brought
out and placed in stragetical positions
before the desk. His Honor lifted his
voice and inquired:
els Mr.. Croft in court?''
II pellet l am dot man." remarked
a citizen with gray hair and a careworn
expression, as he came forward.
"Well, now, do you know these
boys?"
II hat seen doze poys one hoonered
times, Mr.. Shudge.''
"Well, what have they been doing?''
Efer since spring comes dis pig poy
mere mas pecn Glii v~in5 stones nit n, '
front door. Sometimes he hits der
door, sometimes der windows, und
sometimes me. l calls for der bolice,
but he makes up faces-shust so!
runs after him NIT Club, und he calls
me badt name und whistles like vhas
some dog. l drinks dat poy shall end
his days NIT der gallose."
"And about this other boy?''
''Vhell, he comes aroundt, too. He
makes some faces at me oafer der fence,
und When runs behindt him he sings
NIT his mouf:
wouldn't pc a Dutchman,
For fO0fty cents day.
1t makes me awful madt, Mr.. Shudge,
und if 1 git my hands on him he shall
be holdings poody queek! I have tried
like dunder to make dose badt poys go
home und let me alone, und now l
WANTS some law to shtop all dis pefore
I am kilt NIT a pig stone"
"Boys," began His Honor, edo you
realize the seriousness of this case?'
They did.
"Do you fully realize that sharp
lawyer could make conspiracy case
of this-a plain case of conspiracy
human life?"
They probably did, as tears came to
their eyes and they wiped their noses
with great earnestness.
"What shall be done with tnem?"
asked the Court of the complainant.
"Oh! dear!' sighed one.
"Oh! bonesv' walled the other.
Mr.. Croft looked from one to the
other. Their fearful eyes, red noses
and repentant looks touched his heart,
and he replied:
"Vhell, if dey shall be sorry, den l
shall be sorry, too!''
cit is a grave offense,'' suggested
His Honor. Both snuffled in manner
indicating that they wouldn't do so
again for two shillings.
"Dot ish so,'' unused Mr.. Croft,
"but I drinks shall forgif DEM"
"Boys? sharply remarked His Hon
or, 'y0u deserve to be sent up for q
month, but the man whom you have
abused asks for mercy for you. You
can 60, but if either of you come here
again I'll make you think you've stuck
hundred slivers into those flat, bare
feet! Do you hear meP''
Guess we do!'' they whispered, in
union.
"Und do you hears meF' added Mr..
Croft.
They did.
"And," remarked Bijah as he con-
Quoted them to the door, 81 have lust
invented q spanking-machine which
am longing to try. A hint to the wise
is suffish-go home. Detroit Free
Press.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

A Berlin telegram of the 18th says
the Albanians had sent 70 the Congress q
forcible protest against the annexation of any
part of Albania to Montenegro.
1t is related that the Khedive of
Egypt recently proposed to abdicate, leaving
the management Of affairs to England, If the
civil list and his sons succession were assured.
The offer was declined, and the Khedive re-
peated It. ~
A Berlin dispatch Of the Goth says the
Congress had decided to admit Greece to its
deliberations with only . consultative voice
on subjects affecting herself. ess.ss ..
The English expenses at the Con-
gress are stated to be q. 900 per day.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

Gen. Grants visit to England has
given rise to lawsuit. The Council
of Sunderland entertained him and
charged the ratepayers with the ex-
penses of q special train, the ringing of
bells and music. The bill was then
charged to the borough fund, but the
ratepayers objected to this on the
ground that the money collected was
directed by the statute to be applied to
certain purposes, of which the recep-
ton of Gen. Grant was not one. The
Court before which the case was
brought sustained this view of the case,
and 80 the gentlemen who got up the
reception must pay the expenses, some
$500, out of their own pockets
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
-Wom.n Heaven hlo.. hor

Woman, Heaven bless her, is the
light of our homes, but when she tries
to make mans vest, the angels weep.
And when she makes pair of panta-
looms for him, the immortal gods lust
hold their sides and run away out into
the woods and roll ON the grass and
howl Burlington Hasck- Eye. r
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

Gardeners might not like to part
with their gardens, though they arc al
ways ready to fork over their grounds.
Com. advertiser.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

While shearing q long-wooled
sheep, the other day, farmer of Cor.
pus Christi, Tex, encountered two
small moccasin snakes that had en-
flconed themselves in the animals
fleece close to the skin.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04

1t being proposed to erect by pub
lie subscription q monument over the
grave of Charlotte Cushman. the Utica
Herald remarks thatshc left over $500 :
600, and made no appropriation for q
monument; nor did she leave cent.
for charitable purposes. Conclusion;
the heirs can afford to put up. . monu-'
ment. ~ @
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-07-04
American Advertising.

The Americans beat us hollow in the
matter of advertising, andit is our firm
belief that in the United States the adj
vertiser gets far more value for his
money than the manufacturer of any
other Nation under the sun. With
them advertising is reduced, as one
might almost say, to one of the fine
arts, whilst in Great Britain we still ap-
pear to be even yet in the dark ages of
advertising life. There are many rea-
sons for this, into which we cannot
enter here. Suffice it to say that the
American is more judicious and per-
sistent in what he does. He feels that
with so many competitors springing up
he must keep himself well to the front
in the commercial world, or else that in
time he must inevitably '.snuff out. -
As also the home demand gets over
taken, as it often is by too large sup
ply, so does he extend his area of ad-
vertising operations, and at the present
moment in many of our British Colo
nies-markets which ought to be en-
tirely our own-Y ankee {" Notions are
far better known than many of our own
specialties and far more suited to the
locality, simply because practical illus
trations and well-written advertise
ments meet the eye of the consumer in
almost every newspaper.-Bitish Mail.