Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1878-06-20
UNSUITABLE FICTION.

II is absolutely essential to Califor-
nian entering London society that he
has slain at least one grizzly bear. This
is expected and required of him. Once
1 became garrulous over my old camp
and mountain life. Said an English
lady, "But you must have been afraid
| Of wild beasts, all alone In the forest. +"
laughed a manly laugh of dension.
"Did you ever kill a wild beast 70
asked the tender Briton. s
have never killed anything larger
than squirrel in my life. Several
times before had been asked this ques-
lion. With an over-conscientious re-
gard for veracity Ihadanswered "Nay.''
At once / sunk in popular estimation.
Here was the crisis again. Three
young ladies' were anxiously awaiting
my answer--two OF them lIneal descen-
dants of William the Conqueror. They
expected me to be Nimrodish.
said then to myself: "Sirict vera
city and | must part company for a
while. Strict veracity keeps me from
shining. The British public expect
bold, startling deeds from a dwellef in
! the western wilds of America. The
British public shall not be disappointed.
| must launch a slain wild beast upon
them. II shall figure prominently at all
social gatherings. will tell the story
so often that will believe it myself. |
will also hint vaguely of some dark and
dreadful deed all my own. In social
converse my countenance shall fall
suddenly; / shall hesitate; a dreadful
recollection shall, for the moment. seem
TO overmhelm me; shall recover;
will shake II of; viii be myself again.
commenced my new career that
same evening. | said had once killed
ii COYOTE. brought the beast out mod
sFstly, as though TO me there was MOTH
&E particularly brave or meritorious in
IN act.
& &ad what is a. coyote - asked the
LADY, Should say that il was mean,
steak x. cowariiy animal, and thus rob
myself 4 Su my rising reputation
sai6 shai the coyote was a great,
gaunt. poeeFfas animal, with roar like
a lion, and n. Nre dangerous than a griz-
ely. | saldfhat d single one had been
known TO pe WHO'S village TO flight,
and that in his merclless-career, he
spared neither \ gr, sex nor respectable
ity. / told how ( had slxi:Y one after n
desperate fight. showed eae scar,
where | had run ;ack-knife ia;o my
hand when a boy.
My success astom ses and daagSes
me. These innocent gfSritish maidcsS
are so hungry for stories - this descrip-
ton, it. is unkind to deny 4hem. am
now hero. ] retouch auS fs-embelsSh
the tale for every new party. E=e::::u-
ally | am TO bring out grizsag and an
lndian--slain both in single eomaat.
These little fctions are justifablS They
amuse, they interest, they are exp ried.
The end justifies the means.
The American of the further Mast,
in the respectable British imaginaiA =,
rs reckless, blcodthirsty, impetuoM
vindictIye being, hung with six-shoot-,
ers and bowie knives. Seated between
two gentlemen one evening, al a social
gathering, the consessati2e ran thus:
''Yeu are an Asnesicsltf'EN
al aa an Americas En;fSvnian."
''Ahl and it IS truS. that yuur eeopIe
on The frontier hare so many FoH's p
"Much that is Said Is trlSSH,
And have you ever kiife4s Saan -
| started; thought there was an ia
tent TO quiz me. No. The qnerists
were twp hoAaest, innocent, English ar.
lists, who deemed that nearly eyery-
ihingin the universe worth knowing or
seeing was to be found ia London, and
that ailhumanity living without The hap
py, blessed boundaries of England led
vague, Nreeehed sort OF existence.
| hesitated in my answer. Perhaps
one of the gentlemen mistook that hesi-
tation fer the momcntary confusion Of
rtMorse, aHsiemory. agitated by such
fArSSsion, ran over It's long list of VIC
tslxsS lie apologised. said then that
has lsevef killed anybody. | do not
>llink [syas believed. NY delay ID, an
'SSving, SxN my .Spasseai confusion,
) AVER, TSssSesl me in .sllcSr estimatIon
i n %SyT bsss me as q western des-
'Ir.A ~ @s4lssccs sesfese, bis. grimes.
~. M havt Sssjtc d psssioa fCs The
;J.SS.ep>. NSSSsSsss\S IN u
IN rA. ~ NSSits SSw great had
bssr >. ) S.s,,g.,. 'Ss@sss ssisea sull sixteea
years In cS $oua = ). -. & We
less camps saCaA [ssfIs''ss ~ slllltsng
at least one iGetS to " ieseis >ssssfe
the shooting Nsrapr- w sesSsts essis
weekly institatiSas b. NSs as
vent .assIed" wisE f1syrie = a.sess !
| and fsxolyerS where fAa e%sf-
| glass SSSs.nd The bar al ~. La "
ssloos was tfebiesss ia val1s ST. tlfa NJ
/ iet hsies IN Il, sent hilher dalfose a a \
iFevefss between DR.. d. and thSlAeFiA
now Hscaiaeti Neglected oppcrtins.;es
conid ssnt truttfsily say; Il, too. IHSs,
slain Peruvian ls.s