The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1878-10-04
WIT AND HUMOR.

-
A speaking Hkeness-your twin brother.
How to move weeds-Marry the widow
A regular attendant of the club-a polio.
man.
The gait of a horse does not swing O
hinges.
How to acquire shorthand-fool around
puzz-saw.
Always awake-The track made by a
ocean steamer. .7 !
August is q good month for setting on
oootjacks among cats.
The only people who really enjoy ba
health are the doctors.
A volume that will bring tears to YOU,
.yes-a volume Of smoke. i
The Breakfast Table thinks trade Ia look
ing up, because it is fat on its back.
What can pass before the sun withou
making a shadow? The wind.
In Spanish, liberty is "libertad." Thinl
OF raising libertad- poles i-Boston Post. IT
lis night The moon her silent sabl
wears and fiirteth with the stars. Gipe IL
it'll
Very proper slang of the bar-room
Nominate your sun-s stroke ."-BufdLo Ia
press. -
Lightning might do more sometimes If i
wasn't In such an awful hurry.-BndQepor
Standard.
Why is an agriculturist like the leye
which turns n vessels rudder? Because h,
is a tiller.
An air-tight trunk is the latest novelty
The key-hole is hung on n strap and fasten
cd to the handle.
CONSTITUENCY thou art a ;ewe, ~ a.
the candidate remarked to the convention
that nominated him.
An old hunter said 1--WE known n prea,
many foxes to grow gray, but 1 never knew
one to grow good"
Red used on q railway signifies danger.
and says Stop" 1t is the same thing dis.
played on a mans nose.
The song Of the Elmira Gazette is to the
effect that There is n land that is hottie,
than this " in the sweet bye and bye.
Even the ocean cannot show much bigge,
swells than can be found at the pleasure re
sorts in the summer.-AD argus.
Some men keep savage dogs around thei,
houses SO That the hungry poor who stop
Ito get q bite" may get it outside the
door. E4h -7.t7--'
The Union Record says "You can tel
.ne class OF company a boy keeps by what
you find In his head" This is combine
down very fine.
The police at Long Branch are placed
There simply for ornament, or ut most, te
help a high toned drunkard in his efforts t.
step over a straw.
Take back the heart that thou gayest,r
rs the gambler said to his pal, who had
passed him under the table the wrong card
to fill the duah -Du-L
Let's hear from the man who hoes ten
acres OF corn per day.-Detroit Free Press.
we usually draw hose over, ten acres Of
corns per day. Graphic.
II wish to be a friend. to the friendless,
q father to the fatherless, and a widow ts
Ine widowiess, said a gushing speaker al
The imperial palace wherein dwells thu
emperor Of Morocco is afflicted with q bug
of the cimex l~ectularus species, known
among the uncultured as bed bugs.
Fine minsook, embroidered, make,
lovely little slips for children" says a fash
ion writer. Orange peel on a sidewalk con
tfnues to be good enough for men.
"'Can l ask a few questions concerning
the celebrated Damascus steel 2 > is the way
a correspondent begins his letter. Certain.
ly we don't care a Damascus anything you
want to-"
The average Goldfish may be possessed OF
1000, 900 eggs, as Prof. Baird INSERTS, but
we want him to understand that no hen
loses any of her vested rights on this nc.
count--Free Press.
Restaurant patron: These sausages are
hardly up to the mark Waiter They
amt, eh? Well, dye expect italian grey
hound and thoroughbred Scotch terrier 70,
two bits ?"
1t is very depressing to a summer congre.
CATION to see the minister, in the most clio.
quent and imprisoned passage of his ser.
mon, gesture with one hand and fight flies
with the other.-Rawkeye.
Do not trifle with the affections of IN in.
nocent young city girl do not try to make
friends with a mule by squeezing his hind
foot If you aspire either way you will find
that life is q miserable failure.
1t would make q stone image turn greer
with envy to observe the expression Of pro
found abstraction that settles down on the
face of a worshipper when the contribution
basket gets within about three pews of him.
-Burdette.
1t has just been found out that q Western
man gained a big reputation for patriotism
on the Fourth by backing his mule against
a high board fence and letting him kick
Even his next-door neighbor mistook the
sound for artillery firing.
The brass band which figures on getting
a supper out of James Gordon Bennett has
got to play better than Clusters head.
quarters band did at Treyilyan station, and
that band was ordered to "play like hip
Free Press.
"Whar was de sun dis mornin ?" asked
Rev. Mr.. jasper of Virginia. s.Why, dai
side o my house. Whar is it now ? Why,
dis side O. my house darfur de sun musi
ha' got round it. an it couldn't do dat
standing still. Wherefur de. sun moves
sab /"
Nothing tries the patience of a man more
than to be sitting on a sofa in q lark room
with apretty girl, and be compelled to lister
to her brother giving the history Of a bas.
ball club.-Puek. Why didn't you bust hin
in the mouth.-Boston Post.
This cottage for sail" was the sign OF
a country residence. A stranger passing by
asked aiwoman who was standing in the
door when the cottage was to sail, to which
she instantly replied, As soon as anybody
comes along who can raise the wind"
Did the prophet Isaiah ever eat at a rail
road station It certainly looks SO, for how
could he have described It SO literally if b,
had not? "And he shall snatch on tn,
right hand and be hungry and he shall ca
on the left hand and they shall not be salts
fed"
No man can go down into the dungeon o
his experience and hold the torch Of trutl
to all the dark chambers and hidden cavitie
and not come up with q shudder and q chill
as he thinks Of the time when he undertooI