The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1878-09-12
Biiah's Hour.
Detroit Free Press.

|
and realized that the boys old mother
couldn't pay fine; and so he sent him
up to Bijah, accompanied by the follow
ing note:
HEsTEEMED FRIEND-This boy has
been making up faces at the public,
throwing stones at windows, and in
various other ways rendering himself
disagreeable to the public. Can you
convince him of the error of his wayss'
Bijah read the note, looked the boy
over, and mused:
"He's tuff; | can see Dick Turpin in
the cut of his nose, Ben. Butler in the
his mouth, but I'll wrestle with him
aye! he'll go out Of here as humble
minded as a yellow dog caught in a
bear-trap in the back end of the wood
shed. Bub, how long since you had a
good wash ?"
How long since ye sandpapered yer
head ?' was the insolent reply.
"Boyl that's sass, that isl 1t is true
Pm bald-headed, but I don't like to be
told of it. You've been sent up here to
be reformed, and you'd better be little
nice at the outsetP'
"Oh! guess I kin take care of my
selfl I've bin on three 'scursions, own d
a dog, had toe broken, and I'd have
broken out of the stashun if I'd had half
an hour more time!"
"Child of sass and sin, come up into
my department of industry" said Bijah,
as his ears began to work.
"Don't git yourself hurtp' growled
the lad, as he pulled away and drew a
bean shooter from his hind pocket.
The old man picked him up and car
ried him up stairs into the spanking
room, but the boy gazed around on the
implements of reform without the least
emotion. AS he was dropped to his feet
he remarked:
"Hev ye got any stuffed turkey up
here for feller?'
"Tuf2tuf-tuff" sighed Bijah, as
he drew the spanking-bench into posi-
ton. "It's wonder to me, boy, that
you haven't been hung for murder ere
this. Here-look at yourself in this
glassw
Little Jim looked into the ten-cent
mirror, stroked his chin, rubbed a little
of the dirt off his nose, and observed:
81 can't help bein' purity, can I?
Miter blame cause I hain't lost all my
front teeth, and got ears Topping clear
down to my shoulders"
| More sass-more sass! James, alias
Jim, I am now about to invigorate your
physical system with a pine shingle.
You need it. Every look and word
proves to me that you will relish good
sound spanking"
"Pve got money that says there'll be
a lawsuit if you try it onp was the de-
fant reply. N
"Child, threats can not move me, %
sighed the old man. " l owe duty to
you, to your widowed mother, and to
the world at large, and ten thousand
billion lawsuits could not weaken my
elbow. The usual services will now be
inaugurated." ss
Selecting a fine spanker, marked
Velocity, ten miles per hour" BJah
gave the lad sudden twist into posi-
tion, and the collision commenced. AT
the third blow the spanker was split into
half dozen pieces, and the boy laughed
and called out:
"D'ye want Teller to go to sleep in
this posishun?"
"There's more to foller-more to
foller," replied Bijah, as he reached out
for more timber. This time he selected
spanker, marked Perpendicular pres
sure fully guaranteed" and when the
shingle came down cloud of dust arose
and the boy gave a sudden start. A
second blow-more dust. At the third
blow three old carpet-tacks flew across
the room, and young James was visibly
agitated.
The by stood on the burning deck,
Where flame and smoke did mingle;
| And Bijah thought of this as he
| Gyrated with the shingle
As soon as the dust and mud, and
grass, and tacks, and sand had been
cleared away, the spanter began to oper
fire on the enemy all along the line
Young James passed from indifference
to anxious care-from thence to great
mental anxiety, and losing the old cigar
stub out of his mouth in last effort tc
regain his composure, he broke down
and let the fountain in his youthful
heart be turned on. The spanker didn't
stop work at his first appeal, nor hi
second, and it was going as regularly a.
gas-meter when he cried out:
"This 'ere thing hez made perfec
angelof mep
No boy e'er felt the shingle play
With fond remembrance of the day.
There were only two dry eyes in the
room as Bijah let his arm down for .
rest, and said:
"Thar! that's part the first, and I'm
greatly encouraged. didn't expect tt
reform you all at once, but shall taxi
you in sections and be a whole weel
on the job. I will now INTRODUCES
you to soap and water and a crash-towel
and while Pm down to the farm afte
some huckleberries I'll give you lessor
to read in the city directory"
, "Its kinder mean to pound boy witt
, a shingle" softly observed the lad, as h
wiped his eyes on newspaper:
, "My son." replied Bijah, as he pattet
him On the head, "human natur' is mai
urally sinful. A boy is just as prom
, to dc evil as a cucumber is to make III
der the fence into the next mans yard
, He must be wrestled with and coerceG
If one shingle won't make him cut az
quaintance with hard words and ba
r associates, we must try two. 1t almo:
+ breaks my heart to bend boy over m
> knee and administer dose of the Gres
i American Shingle Corrector, but tn
= angels up in heaven will never excus
n man for not doing his duty by his fe
bowman. Some one had to spank goot
. . ness into me, I spank it into you, an
i you will administer the tonic to SON
y one else"
"Mi' the worst boy in town." querie
n the youngster.
t perhaps not, but you are tuff, an
ruff, and you are in fair way to brir
up in State Prison. Boy, did you ev'
s hear of Daniel in the lions denT
ii "Dan'l who?" queried Jim.
n az never heard his other name, m
r son, but some wicked chaps threw hi
P into den containing dozen of the u
d liest lions in the country"
d "And they went for him p
|; "No-not a bite. He was in the
II with 'em all night, and they never ev,
% looked cross-eyed at him."
WASN'T hungry, s'pose," observe
the lad.
II \ IL I .