The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-10-03
SENSE AND NONSENSE. .

SENSE AND NONSENSE. '''s'"'- -'
THE buster has exodusted..
MIssINes men-bad marksrhen. y
Magical relief soda-water beneftA
ThE featheredttribcs- the indians. y
Boston Post. z;
"a coAIeDEALEk is not necessarily 4
coal-blooded man.
A MOSQUITO is like ships hawser;
its best hold is in it's bight.-Ha0k-Eye.
A WESTERN Tr is said to be worth
over S5,COO,OOO.-N y. Cypress.
THE forerunncrs of plague-A
mosquitoes leg.-Ne,o Hagen Register.
YOUNG man, in beginning a court
ship, be sure you don't write, and then
60 ahead.
SOME men cannot stand prosperity.
Others never get chance to try.--But-
talo Express.
THE Washington Republican refers to
Spotted Tail as ''that eminent observer
of the human scalp"
Why is it, do you suppose, that q
COW always laughs when she meets a
milkman?-HaWL-Eye. ....-
WHAT a barber should talk about
whilst shaving man: About two Sec
onds.-NorristOw Herald.
THERE'S son shine for you," said
he. as he saw dutiful boy polishing
his fathers boots.-Syracuse Sunday
Times.
| I'LL do it with my little hat yet" as
| Theology said, after several Intellectual
attempts to capture a butterfly. Slam
ford Conn., Advocatc.
ECONOMICAL housckecpers in New
York adopt young girls, instead of hir-
ing them rs servants. That saves their
wages.-ChicagO Journal.
This is u knob-seck-we-ous occupa-
tion," he said to his gentle partner, as
they secured around in the dark for the
dOor-knob.-fo nkers Gazette.
In these days the fly is less agile, but
more persistent. We do not consider
the change an Experimentation the
bald-headcd point of view.-New HaUen
Register.
WHAT blow it must be to a boys
faith in arithmetic when he first dis
covers that it takes the contents of five
quart bottles to make gallon.
Transcript.
DoN'r talk platitudes to a man in dis
tress. What consolation is it to
drowning man to be assured that there
is good hard ground only eight and .
half feet below his toes?-B urli7sgton
Hasck-Eye.
THIS is the season of the year when
the night air is very dangerous, but the
girls face death at front gates with the
same heroism which has always been
one of the chiefest adornments of the
sex.-Erchange.
THERE are some scenes almost too
pure and sacred to be viewed by the
thoughtless world. One of them is
northumberland woman with mole
on her chin talking baby to an
Ouncc-and-a-half canary bird in brass
cage.-R0ckland Courier.
He was talking learnedly about the
pharmaceutical profession. An honest
I husbandman in the next seat couldn't
help interrupting him with, ''Jes so.
sir, jes SO; a farm may suit gal, but
the feflers patter for Bosting the fust
chance. ''-Boston Transcript.
SUME one has at last discovered the
tendency of the average milkman to
water his milk. His instructive desire
that his milk shall be pure impels him
to wash it carefully before delivering it
to his customers, and some of the wa
ter is apt to get left in.-Boston Aduer-
tiser.
A BUFFALO physician recommends
champagne as a preventive of yellow
favor on1 +Lo p,ffo1or;onc rybC ,,,od
to sneak in the back-door of saloons,
now boldly walk in the front entrance.
Thus far, not q single case of yellow
fever has occurred in Buffalo.-Norris-
t0Mn Herald.
CIRCUMSTANTIAL evidence caused the
arrest of an innocent man at Boston,
the other day, and he will owe to Spod
luck his escape from conviction: A
workman was sent to house to make
some repairs, and Immediately after
his departure valuable gold watch
and chain were missing. No one but
him and the woman of the house had
entered the room containing the jewell
ry, SO far rs known: he was charged
with the theft, and, though he denied
it persistently, was arrested. The own
er of the property soon learned, how
ever, that the watch had been removed
by her little daughter, and every effort
was make to repair the wrong to the
imprisoned man. He, however, de-
clines all apologies or offers of remu-
neration, and proposes to have the case
go into court and receive his acquittal
there.-N. Y. Post.
ON the banks of the {" blue Juniata,"
in Huntington County, stands the quiet
little Town of Alexandria. Years ago,
in and about the village lived man,
the terror of the country, known as
Lewis, the robbcr." Many night
traveller lost his gold, and many a wag-
oner on the old Pittsburgh and Philadel-
phia Pike was bereft by force of his
valuables. Last week two gentlemen
went out hunting on Short Mountain, a
mile or two west of town. They shot a
squirrel, which, wounded, ran into the
trunk of large oak. What was their
surprise when, grasping into the hol-
low trunk for their game, to discover
| an old Dutch oven full of Spanish
doubloons. Mexican dollars, English
sovereigns and other coins, all dated
previous to the year 1920. Several
packages of papers were found which
crumbled to dust as soon as touched.
Their glittering wealth, which they d.
vided among them, amounted to sew
eral thousand dollars. 1t is supposed
that all this wealth was deposited in
the tree by "Lewis, the robber. "-Ak
too1a Pay Tribune.
| Ch1uoso Tonrosv In Con Cranc3scn
Understandable of the Chinese quar-
ter any special designation of filth
ness be applicable to the gigantic nui-
sance in the aggregate-known as Bull