davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
At the Soda Fountain.

Hand in hand they entered and stood
before the machine, gazing wonderingly
at its beauties, when the busting vender
OF the "etfervescent," with his hand on
the valve, in his unctuous tones de-
manded, What kind Of syrup2" This
was something Jake" evidently wasn't
prepared for, but he took in the situation
at a glance, and determining not to ap-
pear ignorant, in tone which implied as
strong as any thing could imply that the
b. V. aforesaid knew his business, and
could fit out any pair of country sweet
hearts who called on him, with Just the
right kind ofsyrup, and no other, he re-
marked, "Wall, reckon as l amt par
ticular." Down goes the valve, and the
bottom of Jake's glass is filled with lemon
syrup, that being the cheapest, while the
b. ", with his most winning smile, turns
to the owner of the little finger mentioned
9bove, and propounds the same query.
Now the gentle creature had heard the
query when addressed to Jake, and won
dered thereat, but was treasured by the
answer as she had caught it. though why
she had smiled at it at the time was rath-
er pulling; but now, when it was put to
herself, she hesitated, stammered,
blushed Grim son, and finally, with a sly
glance at Jake, blurted out, IL guess I'll
take ticker, too" The b. v. disap-
peared under the counter for two or three
minutes, during which a strange sort of
noise, as of subdued earthquake, was
heard from hat direction, after which he
was seen to hurry to the rear of the store,
ana boy shortly appearing, took his
position at the soda apparatus.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
A Strange HalIucinati0n.

A woman named Delehanty, residing
ON Canal street, whose husband has been
sick for long time, walked into police
headquarters this afternoon, accompanied
by her little daughter, and addressed
Chief Maloy as follows: "Cnief, I have
come to give myself up" "What do you
want to give yourself up for?" inquired
the Chief. give murdered my two little
children, a boy and girl, and, Chief, I
cannot stand It any longer. I must give
my self up" The little girl burst into
tears, and, clinging to her mother, said !:
"Why, no; you didn't kill saint l here,
mammal" Then, turning to the Chief,
the little one begged him not to believe
her mothers story as she had killed no
one. II tell you did, Chief said the
mother; ''thev came into the woodshed
while was washing, and killed them"
''You did not" said the Chief. rather
sternly there is your little girl now
"That's not my little girl, that's her
ghost" PERSISTED the mother;T did kill
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
A boy's Composition on Edward vi.

Henry VIII died one day with great
success He left three children who did
not care to go with him. Their names
were Mary, Elizabeth and Edward. The
last was the Ed of the family. He was
also left a will. His will was stronger
than all his children. By will Earl Hert-
ford was to boss the state while Edward
was young. He was only ten years
young. Heftford loved the glass SO much
he became tumbler and was called the
Duke Of Summerset. He wanted the
King to take the Queen-of Scotland
but the trick was lost because the Scotch
refused to assist. The Duke was called
the protector because he protected his
own family and put everybody else away
in the tower. The border men Of Eng
land and Scotland were those who board
almost 10 death; so they had fight about
Edward marrying their Queen. 4 he Eng
lish attacked them by water, which they
couldn't stand. History says that the
Scotch loss was ten thousand and the
English two hundred. History lies, prob
ably. The government told the people
what to believe If they did as they were
told they must pay taxes to support their
belief. If they didn't do so they were
roasted. Thir gs were red hot. Some
body told stories about the protector and
SO he was taken 10 the tower and had his
head chopped off. 1t was not much of a
head, but he hated to part with it. Then
there was rising Of the common people,
but they did not know what for. Most
OF them got raised on to trees with ropes
around their necks. Some very fat men
were burned thus making light Of their
complaints. Now guess it is time for
the little King to die. He was only six
teen when he gave up the crown and the
ghost Finis
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
A Mystifed Colonel.

ms humorous story is from a French
paper: The colonel, rigid martinez, is
sitting at the window of his room, when,
looking out. he sees captain crossing the
barrack yard towards the gate. Looking
at him closely, he is shocked to observe
thrt. the rules AID regulations to the con-
tIary Notwithstanding, the captain does
not cary sword.
Captain he calls from the window:
Hi, captain; step up to my room for a
moment, will you2"
The captain obeys promptly, borrows
sword of the officer of the guard, the
guard-room b ing at the end of the stairs.
and presents himself to the colonel in If,
reproachable teaue.
The colonel is somewhat surprised to
see the sword in its place, end, having to
invent some pretext for calling his subor-
dlnate back, says, with some confusion,
II beg your pardon, captain, but really
I've forgotten whit i. was | wanted to
speak to you about. However, it can't
nave been anything very important; it'll
keep Good morning.''
The captain salutes. departs, returns
the sword to the owner and is making off
across the barrack-yard, when he again
comes within the range of the colonel's
vision.
The colonel rubs his eyes, stares, says
solely to himself, How in the deuce is
this? Blame it, he hasn't a sword TO his
waist then calls aloud, Captain, Ho,
captain! one nom mt, please
The captain returns, borrows the sword
again, mounts the stairs and enters the
coloners presence. His commanding
officer stares at him intently; he has
sword, he sees it, he hears it cank.
Captain" he stammers, growing very
hot, tits deuced ridiculous, you know,
but-ha ha! I'd just remembered what
| wanted to say to you-and now-hal
ha!--it's gone out of my head again.
Fanny, isn't it? Ha! ha! hal Losing
my memory. Never mind. I'll think Of
it and write you. Good morning"
The captain salutes, departs, returns the
sword to the owner and makes for the
gate. AS he crosses the barrack- yard,
the colonel calls his wife to his sid and
says, See that officer out there2"
Yes"
HAS he got sword ong'
The colonel's wife adjusts. her eye-glass
upon him, scans him keenly and says,
He hasn't taste of a sword
The colonel-"That's just where yon
fool yourself! He has!'
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
Healing Il Sore.

DR.. G. f. Waters, of Boston, performed
an experiment upon himself to prove that
bicarbonate Of soda, ii applied to burn
or scald, promptly subdues the pain. He
scalded himself severely on space seven
centimetres broad, all around his wrist
The application of the bicarbonate i'm
mediately relived the pain, and if ali
had gone well, the burn would have been
cured in week
But the doctor was careless, and per-
mi ted his cuff button to catch and tear
the bistered skin, and further trouble
OF the same sort was caused by friction
on the edg. of the cuff The result was
that while the rest OF the burn was soon
cured, the part thus torn became a
troublesome, suppura ing wound
Studying the subject, DR.. Waters
thought that possibly vegetable albumen
might answer the same purpose that ami
NAL albumen is supposed to in the for
nation of dermal scales.
He proceeded to test this theory by re-
moving the scab tr,m portion of the
wound, drying the surface with blotttng-
paper, and then Immediately applying
the white juice of the common milkweed
(Aslcepias s!ya5aca).
Space after space of the sore surface
was thus treated, each portion being al
lowed to heal successfully before the
next part was tried. According to the
depth of the sore, the time of healing
varied from twenty-four to thirty-si
hours; but in every instance new skin
formed completely across.
The doctor states, as TO this new dis
covery, that the only essential point is to
dry the wounded surface gently and
thoroughly with blotting- paper before
applying the milkweed juice From the
description, it appears that, after the
juice was applied, and while the healing
was in progress, piece of blotti ing
paper was also used to cover the sur
face.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
A Mutual Surprise.

Danburv News.
GA Danoury grocery firm have taken the
agency for a hammock. One Of the ar
ticles they have hung at the front in the
shade Of their porch. They hung it
there as an advertisement, bat numerous
people have got into it to see how it
worked, 1t hung so low they could cas-
lily sit in it, and undoubtedly the motion
was agreeable and comfortable. But hit
grocers didn't fancy this performance,
especially as the hammock sitters were
not hammock buyers. SSa .urday after
noon they removed the loop on one end
from the hook, and fastened it by bit
OF Irvine instead. Shortly after man
came in for two quarts of moasscs. 1t
was put up i'll his pail, and q paper tied
over the top as he had forgotten to bring
cover When he passed out he saw the
hammock His curiosity aroused at
once. The grocers were busy inside, so
be thought he would investigate on bis
own nook. With that keen intuition ne
cullar to New Eng land man, he saw at
glance that it was something to get in
to. He knew that it was nothing to wear
and was equally sure it could not be ar
IhhSHb 1Oi SOOh1hS. LIZ ot1I ooWu III
it. Then he swung backward and lifted
his feet up. Then the Irvine fastening
gave away. TWAS Dir, adful affair He
had the pail of moslasses sitting on his
lap, and there was dog sitting under
the hammock Neither the dog nor the
molasses expected any thing any more
than the man himself did 1t was
q terrible surprise to them. The man
and the dog lost their presence of mind,
and even the pail LOST its head. The
molasses went into his lap, and ran down
his legs, and smashed up under his vest,
and insinuated itself some way in between
himself and his clothes. And when he
went down he hit the dog with his heel
On the back, and the dog was so wild
with terror and amazement that it sent
up a head splitting yell and fled madly
down the street, having first taken the
precaution to bite him in the leg, and to
tip over a tier Of wooden water pals.
When the pals went down lot of hoes
were carried over with them, and that
started box of garden seeds mounted on
q box, and they in turn brought away
pile OF peck measures whose summit was
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
Spoiled by Pe,ting.

| had just done laughing over the bo-
vine experience of Max Clark, of Colora-
do, when Jerry Hopkins came in and
told his little yarn. Jerry wanted good
gentle cow, and my neighbor Brown had
her, splendid animal, quiet as q lamb.
The trade was soon concluded, and Jerry
headed old Brindle toward his farm, &C
celebrating her pace by sundry whacks
on ner sirloin with wheel spoke. At
milking time Jerry adopted his usual
method OF wedSing the cows head in a
tight stanchion. During the milking
Btiudle made al i'm promptu switch with
her tail across the friends face, and in
order to check such pernicious habit,
he gently arose and skinned her rump
with one blow Of the oak stool. This
Gained her to such a degree that she let
fly her two hind legs, striking our friend
in the bread basket. Jerry renewed the
offensive with the spoke across Brindle's
ribs, she now and then putting in an IN.
derhander, until our friends shins were
minus about half yard of skin, and
Brindle's ribs presented the appearance
Of Cooks raised map of the Holy Land.
After this Jerry owned the cow three
days, securing her legs with an inch rope
during milking time, and concluded that
Brindle ana he had no affinity in COM
mon. He sought Brown, said he wanted
TO trade back; wasn't as good a mixer as
he supposed. Brown was willing to
please, and at milking time our friend
slipped over to Browns to see the fun.
Peeiing over the pasture wall he spied
the object of his misfortunes sand there
sot that critter by the side of old Brindle
stripping away, she chewing her cud, as
calm as a summer nornlng" II tell
you," concluded Jerry, that COW was
spoiled by petting."- Colorado Letter.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
Name1ess.

The summer sun is on the trses
And t Il path is shady;
You sit within the porch to read,
a very dainty lady.
And is't a poem ma es you grave,
Or just an old love-story
OF maiden bright, and valiant knight
Who rides away to glory?
know the kind of story we'll:
The maiden's hair is golden,
The knight wears armor as they did
In days we now call olden.
They make their vows by moonlight, dear
In language rather stilted,
And then she pines alone for months,
And wonders If she's Tilted.
But he comes gaily back, to find
She is of maids the truest,
And loviier far than maidens are
With even eyes the bluest-
Notlovler, sweet, than you to-day,
With sunshine Oh your bower,
A leafy nook, in which you look
The vsry fairest flower.
Would mig hit read the story, too,
And chat with you about it;
Perhaps it's just as well | can't
Indeed, do not doubt it.
pretty picture, dear, you make,
And in my heart Pll frame it;
[ do not know what your called,
And so | cannot namelt.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
of good English; it is full of c@ntempor-

of good English; it is full Of ccntempor-
aneous history, Of intelligent discussion,
and affords a picture OF the world, study
Of which is nearly as beneficial as expert
ence of it. A great deal about everything
can be found in an enterprising journal
and the student who carefully reads one
day by day will find himself better capa-
Bile OF understanding the exactlons of the
world into shich he is about to be
thrown and OF fighting bis battles than if
he followed too exclusively the pages of
ancient history. Newspaper is the edu
Gator of our day, but for all that there
must be care about newspapers; they
are not all alike, and a great many Of
them would not be desirable in school
room.- Phizadelp7tia Times.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22

expressed his opinion that the best treat
ment for her would be uu bon bouiNon,
I'M bon oe7re de 0in de Bordeaux, ct ,sae
bonnie poire de CITIES. The administration
OF the soup and the wine seemed feasible
enough; bnt 1t was less easy to discern
how sea sickness could be cured by box
ing the patients ears-Saza, IN Beiqracia.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
crowned with a pyramid of canned to-

crowned with a pyramid of canned to-
matoes. 1t was dreadful shock to the
man, and nearly paralyzed him with its
magnitude; but when one article follow
ing another cane avalanching atop of
him, ne thought the evil one himself had
burst loose, and he just screamed as louo
as he could. The molasses was all over
him, and the garden seeds had adhered
to the molasses, and he looked more like
huge gingerbread stuck full OF cara
ways than anything else. In this awful
condition he wadd!ed home, and sworc
every step OF the way.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
Newspapers as Text Books.

Newspapers are being extensively used
in many of the public schools of the
West in place ofbooks for reading lessons.
The wisdom of this course is apparent
Much more is to belearned from one good
newspaper than from half dozen ordin-
airy school readers, and well-edlted pa
per is quite as trustworthy in lhe matter
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22

Of love and wits: In love affairs wit
helps everything and decides nothing. In
the presence of woman he loves witty
man thinks too much of what he is going
to say and not enough of what she is
about to hear. Pretty takers should
remember that love is good deal like
the opera, where the libretto without the
music, the singers and the scenery, does
not count for much.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22

them" It being evident that she was
insane, the Chief ordered her tc be de-
tanned at the Second Precinct until her
relatives could be communicated with.
Her mania is supposed to be caused by
starvation Albany journal.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22

The London Lancet says blow on the
ear has often ruptured the drum, and
warns parents against boxing children's
ears. You can get more music out of a
child by applying the slipper couple Of
feet below the ''drum.' -Norrastow
Herald.
Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884, 1878-09-22
A Nevada Poet.

We found him last evening, Or rather
he found US; He is the coming poet =
the rival of the "Sweet Singer Of Mich
gan" Said he: 81 am poet, and l
never found it out till yesterday"
"And you are at least forty-fve years
of age said We, as we scanned the
wfinkled and somewhat grlzzled face
turned so earnestly upon us.
eyes, torty-six last May. It is strange,
but never tried poetry until yesterday,
and find can write it very rapidly
Here are dozen pieces that wrote yes
terday, last night and to-day. I'll read
them to you.'
"For heavens sake not all of them p
cried we.
"Thcy are not tedious. You will find
they don't drag. They are not Of the
dull, heavy style. They are rather of the
spicy, wide awake style. Here, now, is
one that is sort of conversation among
birds and animals-I even make fish
talk. Sail begin with it?''
Provided you promise to end with
it.n
"Cut me off where you please, but
am sure you will want 1t all. 1t i
called
TIT FOR TAT.
CHOW listen
Said the mulet to the pullet,
You'll be shot with bullet,
Said the pullet to the nullet.
You'll be took
With hook
Stuck right in your gullet'
"'Hootp said the owl,
With aterrible scOwl,
First on the fish, then on the fowl,
Life is bubble
Why borrow trouble!
Both your latter ends
Will be as Fate sends!
And be happy while you may
mo hook COOS into my gullet,'
Said the confidential mullet,
But pity the pullet
Who must die by the bullet
"tNo need, say, save your pity pray
Was the pullets reply,
BY bullet | never shall die;
But you to the cook
VIII 20 on HOOK,
Then in pan you'll fry
ga wise old ass that happened to pass,
Tn going to grass cried: ALAS!
Hear these creatures of curious features
Discoursing on -"
9'Thai will do" cried we, 'not another
line. We can't have it!'
''But," said the little man, "there are
only twenty pages more Of this piece
"Can't help it-can't hear any more,
said we.
"But-but, I beg, be kind enough t.
hear the ass out. The ass is the best part
of it."
"We will hear no more ofthe ass" said
we in our sternest manner. The asses
have too much to say in this world (Tak
ing the little man by the arm.) They
have too much to ssy, and we shall nov
lead the chief Of them to the door anc
wish him good speed"
The Little man gathered up his papers
more in sorrow than in anger and allowed
hi nself to be led away. Virginia Cits
Enterprise.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-12-19
IN UNDENlABLE TR UTR.

You deserve to suffer, and.if you lead mis-
cradle, unsatisfactory life in this beautiful
world, it is entirely your own fault and there is
)nly one excuse for you,-your unreasonable
prejudice and skepticism. which has killed
thousands. Personal knowledged and common
sense reasoning will soon show you that Green's
August Flower will cure you of Liver Com
plant or Dyspepsia, with all its miserable
effects, such as sick headache, palpitatiOn OF
he heart, sour stomach. habitual costiveness,
dizziness of the head, nervous prostration, low
spirits, &c. Its sales now reach every town on
he Western Continent and not druggist but
viii tell you of its wonderful cures. You can
Guy sample bottle for 10 cents. Three doses
will relieve you.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-12-19
LAND FOR SALE IN
Ml!ANIT0W0c COUNTY
IN CALUMET COUNTY.
Bri!liOn. Town 20. Range 9O.

sez- sec ~. 100 acres. nes sec. % 160 acres
Joining the City of Manitowoc, north side. on
Michigan Avenue, l09 acres. 90 rods front
The NJ. l.. 5. Il W. K. r. runs through the
above lands. lying chiefly between Spring Greek
gepot, :: mile west and Reedsville 3 miles east
Good soil for wheat. Roads stores. mills schools
and churches convenient Markets - Sprjno
reek, Reedsville. Manitowoc, Green Bay, Me-
aasha, Neenah and Appleton.
Terms of sale. one-fifih cash, the balance in one
20. three and four Years. with annual interest.
Address Rev MEAD HOLMES, Rockford. III
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-12-19
TIE MUTUAL FARMER FIRE ms, CO.
OF
MANITOWOC RAPIDS.

DIRECTORS.
BERNHARD DELSMAEN, of Koss nth.
PET Err REFS,
JOSEPH AUGUSTIN "
MICHAEL SEIDEL, "
CARL kLINGH0LZ, of Mauitowoc Rapids.
GEORGE MEISNEST,
HENCEL KADET, "
NORTH KEEL, OF MantownC.
FRIEDRICH KNUTH of Gibson.
any farmer desiring to become a member of this
Insurance Co. will apply TO any of the a5'
Farm property insured at 25ets year per 500.
BERN. DELSMANN. President
J.AUG CUISINE. Treasurer
CHAS. KLINGH0LZ, Secretary.
At the Regular Meetings gu the GOth of March
2ath OF June, 26ti of October 1878, and tine Annual
Meeting the 25;h of January, 1879 at Joseph
Euehue's, at the Four Corners at O'Clock p NJ, ali
neE-be are invited to be present that they may
see how their money is managed for the reuehi OF
ever! member. jan 3l-78
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-12-19

A moderate estimate of the yield of
corn fodder, would be one ton for every
ten bushels of corn. The corn crop will
this year doubtless reach at least one
thousand millions of bushels. This would
give 100,00O,000 tons of fodder, worth for
feeding purposes, if well cured and saved,
at least IS per ton. In the aggregate this
is $500,000,0O0. This large sum could
easily be made for the country out of the
crop of corn fodder, by wisely saving and
economically using it. But no produce
of the farm is so injured in the harvesting
and storing, or so wastefully used as this.
At the present time we might consider
how corn fodder can be properly saved,
says the American Agriculturist. First,
the corn should be husked as soon as pos
sible, and the fodder firmly tied up in
easily handled bundles or sheaves, which
should be carefully set up in stocks, and
these should be well tied at the top, and
well spread at the bottom SO as to keep
the inner part dry and well aired. In this
state it will cure thoroughly in two weeks
after husking, and will then be ready for
stacking or putting away liz the NOW.
The good qualities and value for feeding
will have been much enhanced by early
cutting, as already advised.
The people of Moscow declare that their
great bell shall never be pulled down
rom its glittering steeple. where it reigns
over all other church bells in the world.
Its weight is 443,772 pounds, while the
other famous bells are light in compari-
son: st. Paul's, London, 10000 pounds;
Antwerp, 10000; Oxford, $4,000; York,
$4,000; Montreal, $4,000; Rome, 10000;
Bruges, $4,000; Cologne, $4,000; Erfurt,
10000; English House of Parliament, 81
900; Vienna, 10000; Novgorod, $4,000;
Pekin, 1876, 600; Sens, $4,000 Moscow (its
second), 141,000. The great bell of Mos
cow is 10 feet high and 81 feet round; its
noise is tremendous.
To Prevent and Cure Coughs and Colds
Il reliable remedy is necessary in every house
hold. Parker's Ginger Tonic is just the medi-
cine needed 1t radically cures Coughs. Colds,
Sore Throat, Bronchitis and even Consumption
If used in time, by its powerful specific action
on the Stomac Kidneys. Skin, Liver and mu-
cous surfaces of the Throat and Lungs. 1t ac-
composites the cure in wonderfully short time
md removes all pain and soreness of the lungs.
It is also a most valuable stomachic remedy, eff
eectually removing Dyspepsia, Headache, Liver
Disorders, Costiveness. Nervousness, Low Spir-
It's, Wakefulness, Heartburn, Cramps, Palpita-
zion of the Heart, Sour Stomach, etc, and gives
cheering comfort and freedom from pain that
surprises every one. Buy a S1.00 bottle from
your druggists Jones Schalern, or a sample
bottle at 10 cents and test its merits