Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1878-07-12
" Stand Up" Goodrich.

So, then, we have new citizen, a real
acquisition. Hear him: 90 have come
to stay with you" Well, Buchanan
county never turned any one away.
But why did you tell us this? Leave to
us the pleasure of the discovery. Per-
haps you think we are too dull to appre-
ciate brains. We are not; we have
found out that even our sheep and hogs
have brains, and our geese have quilts.
Our people are benevolently disposed.
Without the previous announcement by
yourself, they would have found you
out. Perhaps we err. Maybe you
thong hit we are too Strengthened in cir
cumstances to furnish you lodging. We
are not; in the city are several taverns,
but they do accept money from their
dodgers. They mark nothing G. O. d.
This marking c. 0. d. is only matter
Of form and custom. We are not ac-
customed to it here. Perhaps you dis
covered this and hence think it proper
to say, Il have come to stay with you"
If you are used to the c. 0. d., it may
be fatal to omit the characters. How
would it do to compromise the matter?
Petition Congress to blot out the G. O.,
and expand D. into Delivery, and then
cut OF the y. Deliver" looks we'll, and,
to a great number Of persons who board
our boats and trains, sounds well, But,
if you do not like our taverns, on their
conditions, still we can accommodate
you. The city has small building in
which persons are often entertained
free. The county has larger building
in which are several rooms, one large
and several smaller. At this house you
will find the host and hostess very kind
and accommodating; they even lock the
doors so that outsiders cannot intrudc
upon their guests. Here you would
have no need of G. O. D., as it is all de-
liver. By the kindness Of the State we
have, on a hill overlooking the city,
very large hyilding for special accom-
mediation. We are a sensitive people;
but presuming you had not investigated
our resources, and that you imagined
that rain had not been sent upon the
evil, we forgive you for abruptly an
nouncing the length of your visit.
"And if you want war, damned be he
who first cries hold, enough" Don't
come; don't! We had war once, and
have not quite paid the score yet. We
are not really q cowardly people, but
our laws say we must pay our debts.
The laws governing our people are, per-
haps, a little peculiar, and, a few think,
rigid. For instances if A holds 500
note against B, the law will not permit
A to take his pen and make the note
5000, and then sell it to c. Were it not
for this popularity of our law, we might
stand any number of wars. If you mean
argument, then come and stay. What's
this! Damned" No. Don't come. Our
people attend church. sing hymns,
psalms, tunes, and pray several times
week. They can't stand swearing. It
does not appear we'll for a Superintepd-
emit of Sabbath school to swear. You
are going to stay until you free our peo-
pie, and do sundry other things. We
know our county is no exception to the
rest of the world. Many Of our best
people, with pure motives and honesty,
got into debt. but by hard work, rigid
economy and strict attention to their
,wn business, they will come out with
honest hearts and pure characters.
Have you any dollhouse process? How
would it do to give every man wood
contract; let him have uncontrolled
of the money, and when he APP
,ropriates it to his own use, to avoid
he prosecuti0ns,,ha have some benevolent !