The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1878-10-25
WHAT THE WITS SAY.

l. A finished rogue-One at the end of
rope.-Chaeago Bulletin.
The Albany Journal invites us to shed
4 tear over the grave of Washington. O
very well. Fetch on your grave.-Bufa
p Erpress.
, Cleopatra's Needle is in it's place. and
said to tit ia beautifully with it's surroune
, lngs. 1t may be termed real Mill it,
Albany Times.
|, There is no mistaking what the sad Sc
, waves are saying nowadays. 1t is: "Vel
II don't see you some more, Hellor'-Rocz
ester Democrat.
| The sun is 32O,0 times larger than th
earth; {; but it doesn't feel near as big a
an eighteen-year-old boy does the first tim
ne dons high hat.-Phsladezphsa Chrons
cge-Herald.
A Nebraska Indian has been struck b,
lightning three different times, and he had
no presence of mind until some one told
him to wear an empty oyster can in his hat
Detroit Free Press.
We saw rife club practicing at target
the other day, and wondered why they took
all that trouble to make the target when
they could have hit the side of the hill lust
as well without t.-Ee.
Which are the llghtest men, Irishmen.
seotchmen, or Englishmen? In Ireland
there are men of Cork, in Scotland there
are men of Ayr (air), but on the Thames
there are lightermen.-Hartford Tines :.
Brevity is the soul of wit. A man who
was recently huRg in Indiana proves it.
lie made no remarks about Heaven, but
nodded to the preacher and said: "I'll see
you later" and then the trap fell.-Ar-
gonGut.
The Sweet Singer of Michigan has laid
in four reams of paper, and is now engaged
In writing Biblical poem. She has
scratched all the hair off the top of her
head hunting for a word to rhyme with
Walt Whitman would
make creation rhyme with it, and 20
straight ahead. ad.-Norristown Herald.
The melancholy days have come,
The saddest of the year
When taxes reach maturity
And myriad bills appear
When frosts from northern ATTITUDES
Upon the breezes float,
And sighs the editor 10 think
He has no evcrcoat.
Yoaahera Gazette
Try not to pass" the old man said so
he urchin made it "next" instead. d.-New
Haoen Register. And the old man chuck
ed and nudged his pard, for he held both
'owers and the joker card. -Bradqeport
standard. And the fourth man muttered
We can't afford to have SO much talking
cross the board.-New York GrGphic.
hen smile DER the urchir's face did
teal, as he threw down six cards and ex-
laimed, Misdeal. ."-Norrsstown Herald.
,orking classes is a dictionary complied by
imself. The following are specimen def |
itions selected at random. We vouch for
heir originality, and can prove that Kear-
ey did not steal them from speeches OF
f George William Curtis or sermons by
,eecher:
Capitalist-A land pirate.
Editor-A cut-throat
Chinaman-A moon-eyed leper.
Democrat-A piratical whelp.
Governmental thievish crew.
Republican-A lying hypocrite.
Larceny-The red flag of the commune.
Associated Press-A lecherous hound.
Senator-A sneak, knave, cur.
Railroads. robbery managed by rotten
and sharks.
Telegraph "A Shiny fraud, run by poit-
cal pimps and bummers.
Newspaper-A shoddy concern kept alive
,y thieves and pampered whelps.
Office ce-holder-A land pirate, a cut-throat,
/ piratical w help, a spawn of hell, sneak,
\ thievish pimp.
MAKING 1T WARM FOR HIM.-The Bur-
ington Hagkeye man says: The other
- ,,or no 1iuas ont Calumh hia ST |