The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-11-16

Clalneu Jne bridegroom dIuer Il Few
moments of vehement suction, give
been suckin' that darned thing for five
minutes, and there amt a bit of juice
in it! Come on, let's go!''
"A ianitor of a New York public
school went to Coney Island, and left
his wife in charge of the engine and
boiler, telling her that there was a
patent guage on it and the steam
pressure could not run over seven
pounds. 1t ran over twenty -four
pounds, and the wife, becoming
frightened, ran to factory where a
brother engineer was employed. He
found no water in the boiler and
twelve hundred children in the school
overhead.
An international dairy fair is to be
held at the American Institute, in New
York City, beginning on the I'd of Deem
Der. Besides exhibits of dairy products,
it is expected to show implements and
machinery for butter and cheese max
ing, agricultural designs and models
for creameries, cheese factories, dairy
buildings and barns. Also, dairy mich
cows, and all other articles or COM
modities in any manner connected with
the dairy.
Astronomers tell us that if there
was Geographic wire from the
earth to the nebulp in Andromeda, it
would take 1,250,000 years for dis
patch from here to reach its destina-
ton. And suppose the rate was forty
cents, and you sent the message to be
paid at the end of the line, how like all
eternity the interest would pile up on
the other fellow by the time the boy
handed him the message. Figure it up
some of you,-Ha1Ob-Eye.
"A noise in Mr.. Lakes house in San
Jose, Cal, led him and his dog to be-
lieve that burglar was at work, and
they started in different directions to
investigate. 1t was in the night, and
when the man and the beast came to-
gether in a hallway, each took the
other for the intruder. The dog sprang
from under table, intended to seize
Mr.. Lake, who, believing that he was
attacked by a robber hastily fired sew
eral shots. A light was brought, and
the wounded dog, recognizing his mas
ter, crawled to his feet and died.
The Paris GauloiS tells this whop-
per to off set the claim that Frenchmen
should have the American right of
free assemblage to discuss politics:
"SiX months ago 700 people assembled
at New York to discuss the salary
question. While speaking two revolver
shots were fired at the orator; his par
tisanS fell upon the shooter and killed
him, and the melee became general.
The meeting was interrupted and the
hall emptied; in it was found sixteen
corpses, while twenty-three men were
seriously injured"
The Milwaukee (Wis.) procession
which was attending the remains of
DR.. Mainrod Risch to to the grave was
sadly demoralized by bull which es-
capped from butcher who was taking
it through the city. The Infatuated
beast overturned the carriage con-
tanning the mourners, and fright
ened the horses attached to the hearsc,
causing them to run down a bank,
where the vehicle caught in the fence,
and one of them escaped. The remain
der of the funeral train gave the bull a
wide berth, and the coffin then con-
tinued to its destination in an omnibus.
"A remarkable case of mistaken
identity came up in New York the
other day. AS Robert McKillar was
sauntering up the street he saw what
he supposed was his boy Tommy, re-
proved him for being so far from home
and started to take him back. just
then Mrs. Stedman approached and
demanded her boy, and accused Nc
Kellar of an attempt ut abduction, but
he spurned her protest. She secured a
policeman, and both parties went be-
fore justice. Mrs. Mcclellan was sent
for to solve the problem, and brought
her boy with her. Mcclellan was dumb,
founded with amazement. The like
ness was very remarkable, but he readi-
surrendered at discretion, and all the
parties repaired to their homes with
something wonderful to relate to their
friends the rest of their lives.
There was prize for the prettiest
girl at ball in Gold City, Montana,
and the delicate question was to be de-
cided by a committee. The choice
was generally conceded to lie between
Miss McGowen and Miss Burt, and, one
being a blonde and the other a bru.
nette, the committee was unable tC
Judge OF their charms by comparison
The suspense was trying to the tenn.
pers of the rival beauties, and they fell
to criticising each others looks. Then
they quarreled. Next, they fought
When they parted, Miss McGow-
ans face was scratched as though she
had been thrown into bramble bush
and one of Miss Burt's eyes was
swollen and nearly shut. That episode
relieved the committee of embarrass.
ment, for neither of the two young
women was any longer pretty, and the
prize was awarded to another.
-" Yes" said a well-known chemist
to New York World reporter, the
other evening, "people will have tin
lined stomachs before long" Their
the chemist went to closet and tool
therefrom several small bottles, which
he held up before strong light. He
exhibited several sheets of tin which
had been extracted from sugar pur
chased from extensive dealers in sugar
in that city. This" said the chemist
is what they use in the adulteratior
of sugars, and | am informed tina