The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1878-12-21
r,v,s ANN riaiE.


! ping with ladies-TRke notes,
1t Is never too late TO mend. Rvea
the devil has his darning-Deedls.
when gamblers fall 10 agree. thsf
pour Huyie ON the troubled waters.
.-''Russia says peace a her great SU.
ject." Yes a-bitce Of Btitish India.
"A punster challenges 1 alex maDl
vote at city election, on the EfonGd
that he was an ill-legal yOtefi
The Washington M1humehl III
one part of II finished, That 10 eha
tund-that was used up long ago.
weight for the wagon" obpef1ed
the farmer as le helped his fhtee-hunS
dred- pOdnd wife To b stSt 10 she Vehi-
| Gle.
-Susan's Town, named IN honor 0f
Miss Susan b. Anthony. has just been
made the county seat Of Harpet's t6HHa
ty, Kansas.
"A new mechanical 10y 10 . doll;
which, dressed In a bathing suit, pluases
into II tub VI water, and, moving hande
and feet, goes swimming around.
What the Ameer thInks mlshI
come of admitting an English EnVOy(ad
he puts 1t in his broken EngllshJ -"Am
ere to-day, might be gone Tomorrow"
-Some mean scamp out In Dstrois
! Mich, has counterfeitted the cent, bat
has tried to avert penalty by obscure
ly stamping mot" In small letters eVeF
Zone cent"
| Accident Insurance companies
have put kings and etnpeToTS down
in tile fourth class of flskL. eDong With
engineers, fireiiieH; bfkfeBiiieR Rhd
book-agents,
"A couItley Degro recently sent
reply TO an Invitation, In which he ''res
gretted that circumstances FepuRnans
requiescence would prevent his aecspSA
ance Of the invite"
"Is your msster up2" SeRSH. kR .xiliy
visitor OF hOblehIhii's valet "Yes,
sir" answered the valet with great
innocence: the butler and I carried
him up about 3 O'Clock"
Overheard on a ferryboat- Every:
thing has gone wrong with A. 7 Stew
arts affairs since his death. IL tho old
man had been alive the Sc. Marks
churchyard outage hevet Ao6Id hats
occur ed"
"A schoolboy upon being asked ~
his teacher low she should 1og him rec
piled: "If you please, sir, / should like
to have it on the style Of penmanship-.
the heavy strokes upward and ths
downward ones light"
"A musi.ia Geotge Sharp, had hid
name OH the door thus: "G. Shatp."
A wag Of painter, who knew sEhiez
thing of music, early one 9tbtiiihsl
made the following undeniabie hid
significant addition: "ls Hat.
"A Kalamazoo fAlich.) paper ah:
nounces the death of William GteeR
under the headihg !, "fhs l'ale iiotss
With Its Rider Visits kalamazoo |
And Lays Its Icy Hand on One Of Her
Best Mem |" The "icy hand" Of ths
"pale horse" is good.
--(Master Charlie and his family ktS
spending a few days at the house Of that
promising artist, Mrs. Vandyke BrCwn.)
Mrs. V. B.: Well. Charlie boy, why
are you looking so hard at that pictur~7
Charlie: Why; mamma says that .efety
time she lcoRs at this Picture It fhSRe8
her sick, aud l thought I'd see II k
would me.
"A London gentleman saw in Q pa
per the advertisement Of very desire.
BILE servant, who wanted . plsce. and
. on calling at the address, found no
"Fmily" but an intelligence once.
where nothing wotild be done FOR him
till he had paid q fee. He promptly
summoned the keeper, and the Judge
gave him 5s. compensation for loss Of
time, the woman having also 20 pay
the costs, and eulOglzed him fof hkV.
: ing done public Service:
"A tramp, giving the fiGtie 8t wit.
liam Thompson, has been afrksted Ahd
is now in Jail at NOTristOwn, chafxtd
c with the attempted abduction Of Afiibs
Weikel, a boy, eleven years DID,, Who
says that Thompson forced HIN ID iHixe
his home by threats OF VIOLENCE. Wei.
kel was found In company with Thonp;
> sLn several miles from his home ~
Trappe, Montgomery county. By pelRh:
bors who instituted . search fOt hiG
= when he was reported missing.
S All adftilret u ihgersolI got iiSld. si
that paragraph III Whleh II u itikted
how Bob keeps n pOcketbOOk ID 9
drawer where his children can 90 and
get what money they want al siiy time,
and he read 1t at the supper table to his
, wife ard children, and told hBE mech
he admitted the, dian TOT It. TIE neat
e morning when he woke up he diSeOteFsd
his youngest boy going through" hls
pantalOOns pockets. "WhAt are you
doing there, young mann" he exclaimed,
in voice OF thunder. Why. pa" Fo-
] piled the yOungster, "I couldnt ana
> your pOckeib JOk In any OF the dTaWefs;
and I thought yOu must have fOEgoi
j tn lay 1t out" Theory IL 6te thing
= and practice another.
"A CLEVER little paaSags ct the e1-
:, pense Of d thethbet 6f the Belgian
Legation is current In Washington:
A young atthche recently. reached
t there fresh from EOndbh; hli last ste.
r tion, and was greatly Vexe1 over what
he was pleased to call \ ls. e1ile. "At
q all events.I he vas II the habit Of
saying, and the tethatk came 10 Be
. widely quoted, 'f shall speak no RnG.
, lish In Washington. learned it %
; London. and l don't intend 70 Opoil
D my accent" Time passed. The at
tache was at a reception. Some friend
, of his asked bright young Americas
woman 10 permit MN 70 present ina
attache to her. "Oh. dear don't"
was the reply, and 1t has travelled 6fbf
Washington, 81 cOuldn't thluk Of
such a thing. learned thS French
In Paris, aud II would tElp my acosnt
to talk with Belglah."
-''Now yoq Iamsfican gents. +" sald
the Master of Ceremonies at HslifAx 20
a party CT American visitors, ''afOre yo4
are introduced to is Hexcelleney an
r 'er Royal 'tghness there's 4 few Thlei
to be hObserved. DOn'texpeetorate ho9
the carpet has you're In the 'abIt Of
doing al 'ome, you know. and d6nI
keep you're ats on, as you hAiways ~
in Hamerica. And no EeRdlVeTs OF
bowie-kniVes is hallowed TO be dfaH1
in the presence OF 'ls Hexceilen6y an
'er Royal 'Ighness, wioh is what you're
ADDING of in Congress cODtihtaily. An,
f you'll walk In forwards, an you WOn'
3 t,i,l- 81 sHaElnu ganAa Nth 1ar Rnekl