The Osceola times., 1878-04-20
A Chicago Drummer's Cheek.

He was man with triangular smile,
n cold, steel-gray eye, and a face as
clean shaven as priest. He sat down
at the end of the dinner table, tucked a
napkin under his chin, smiled pstroniz.
ingly upon the bowiDg waiter, and said :
"Bring me good tony dinner,
Thomas. No soup to-day--thanks."
"Yes, sah."
"Plenty of substantials-turkey, sec.
ond joint remember"
"Yes, sah."
"With dish of cranberry sauce"
eyes, sah."
"See that the vegetables are all warm"
Yes. sah."
"And Thomas" calling him back (;
"the roast beef must be rare and fat
don't forget"
"Yes, sah-.yes, sab"
Then he stroked his face with the air of
man on the best of terms with himself,
dipped lump of sugar into his glass OF
water, crushed it in his mouth, dropped
back into a graceful attitude, and oc.
cupied himself in watching the other
guests until the waiter returned with his
uCubNu
Thomas" he said, as the waiter
ranged the dishes in semi circle before
him, yeu must do better If you expect
me to remember you, rs | am in the
habit of doing. The last time was
here-the day Senator Matthews was
with ms-you brought us dinner good
enough for king But this is shabby,
Thomas shabby, after the way I've
ALWAYS looked after "..tapping his
breast pocket significantly. "The baked
oysters on the hali-shell are missing,
Thomas. / don't see any lobster salad or
wine jelly. You must use better taste,
or shall have to wade through the bill
OF fare myself, Thomas, and have such
a headache | don't like to do it. This
beef seems cooked to crisp, and looks
tough as finance. Take it all away,
Thomas, and try again. See If yeu can't
do justice 10 your reputation. Remember
am i'll, Thomas, and don be sparing of
the dainties. You know my weakness
.--touch the palate in the right spot, and
it's the same thing as putting your hand
in my pocket" with wink that opened
the darkey's face from ear to ear.
eyes, sab, yes, sab. Git it right dis
time, Gen'l. See dc mistske-took ye
TO Gov'neh Williams beg pardon, sab,
beg pardon, didn't see you fab in de
face. We all gifts fused sometimes, so
many gemmen comm"
And the waiter, with many apologies,
lavished his best bows upon the self
assertive stranger as he gathered up the
dishes with great alacrity. In a few
moments he returned with the choicest
viands the house afforded, and this time
met with such unmistakable evidence Of
approval that he stepped over 10 a
brother waiter and informed him in an
exultant whisper that he had just fod-
dered a member of the cabinet with the
best of satisfaction and would get f We
dollar fee sure. The other offered him q
dollar for his chance, and lost his friend
ship from that moment.
"Thomas
Yes, sah."
The waiter was bowling at his side In an
instant, and received the order for dessert,
which he proceeded to execute with the
utmost dispatch, not forgetting to include
a good display OF rare delicacies, as his
own voluntary tribute to greatness.
With folded arms he took his position
behind the chair of the stranger, and
waited patiently for the moment when
he should see something glitter as it was
slyIy slipped under the edge of the plate
for be felt that member of the cabinet
could not consistently swerve from the
golden standard.
Thomas"
"Yes, eah.'
"These figs have been exposed to the
air for some time"
Yes, sab
"Bring rae some from fresh box,
please. My stomach is very delicate to
day."
Yes, sah."
The eye Of the stranger watched the
retreating form of the sable child Of hope
until it passed through the door, and
then the man arose aud hastily left the
room. Gentle reader, would you know
who IL was that 80 basely abused the
confidence of the susceptible son Of Ham
You shall-it was a Chicago drummer
A YOUNG lady said a pretty good thing
the other evening. She had many ad
mirers among the limbs OF the law, snc
L. L.. -