Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1878-05-15
Superior Hotel Accommodations.

A hotel in Syracuse has got the follow
ing circular, for the benefit of its guests.
1t would be very attractive document
only they omit saying anything about the
salt works. Here is the circular referred
to:
This hotel has been built and arranged
for special comfort and convenience of the
travelling public.
On arrival each guest will be asked how
he likes the situation, and if he says the
hotel ought to be nearer the railroad
depot the location of the house will be
Immediately changed.
Corner front rooms, up only one flight.
for each guest.
Bath, gas, water closet. hot and cold
water. closet. laundry telegraph; fire
alarm, restaurant, bar room, billiard ta-
oles, daily papers, coupe, sewing machine,
u grand piano, clergyman, and all other
modern conveniences. in every room.
Meals every minute, if desired, and con-
sequently no second table.
English, French and German dicton-
aries furnished every guest to make up
such bill of fare as he may desire, with
out regard to the bill of fare afterward at
the office.
Walters of any nationality and color if
desired. Every waiter furnished with a
libsetto. buttonhole bouquets. full dress
suits, ball tablets, and his hair parted in
the middle.
Every guest will have the best seat in
the dining hall. and the best waiter in the
~ guest not getting his breakfast red
hot and experiencing delay of sixteen
seconds after giving his order for dinner
will please mention the fact at the man.
ayers Office, and the cooks and walters
will be blown from the mouth of the can
non in front of the hotel at once.
Children will be welcomed with de-
light, and are requested to bring hoop
sticks and hawkeyes to bang the carved
rosewood furniture, especially provided for
that purpose, and peg tops to spin on the
velvet carpets; they will be allowed to
bang on the piano at all hours, fall down
stairs, carry away dessert enough for a
small family in their pockets at dinner,
and make themselves as disagreeable as
the fondest mother can desire.
Washing allowed in rooms; ladies Civ
ing orders TO put me on a fatiron will be
put ON at any hour of the day or night.
| A discreet waiter, who belongs to the
Masons, Odd Fellows, Sons of Malta,
Knights of Pythas, X. o. MS and M. D.
K. sand who has never been known to tell
the truth Or the time of day, has been
employed to carry milk punches and hot
toddies to the ladies rooms in the evening.
The office clerk has been carefully Sc
lected to please everybody, and can lead
in prayer, play draw poker, match worst
ed in the stores, shake for the drinks at
any hour. day or night, play billiards, a
good waltzer. Can dance the German
make fourth Mt euchre. amuse the chill
dren, repeat the Beecher trial from memo.
ry, is good judge of horses, as a railroad
or steamboat reference is far superior tC
Appleton's or anybody else's guide, will
flirt with any young lady and not mine
being cut to death when pa comes down
don't mind being damned any more thar
the Connecticut river, Can room forty peo
pie in the best room in the house when the
hotel is full. attend to the annunciator, ant
answer questions in Greek, Hebrew, Choc
taw, Irish, or any other polite language Il
the same moment without turning II hair
Dogs allowed in any room in the house
including the w(h)ine room. Gentlemen
can drink. smoke, swear, chew, gamble
tell shady stories, stare at the new arri
walls, or indulge in any other nnocen
amusement in any part Of the hotel.
The landlord will always be happy t,
hear that some other hotel is the bes
hotel in the country.
Special attention given to parties wht
can give information how to keep a hotel