, 1878-05-22
CONFIDING WOMAN ROBBED OF HER
GLORY

lllC uutuOl vi HIS " IL UNIV MOAbS S'S - ;
commencing:
"Old Grimes is dead, that good old man,
We ne'er shall see him more,
He used TO wear lOng.tailed coat,
All buttOned down before"
Now Old Grimes, like Alas p. Iorrck,
was ~ mad wag," and if he didn't pour
a t1agon OF Rhenish wine upon the head
of his grave digger, he once, on q wager,
with seme of his bibulous companions,
stole the robe de mutt off the back of the
parsons wife in the county village,
where he lived. This was how he won
his bet; Knowing of the absence of the
venerable parson from home, he rode up
at midnight on horseback to the bed
room window of the parsonage, and
reused the good lady against whose peace
of mind and property he had conspircd
from her slumbers. He wanted to know
which house DR.. Johnson lived in. The
unsuspeCting dame raised the window,
thrust her head out to point out the
house, when Grimes seized the flowing
robe from her person and rode away in
all the triumph of his wickedness.
A somewhat parallel case wherein
many gentle and unsuspecting women
have recently been shorn of their goods
and glory, has lately transpired in Potts
town, Pennsylvania, aud very many of
the fair danes and damsels of the place
been reduced to dsmay and tears no less
poignant than those of the parsons wife.
About the beginning Of Lent two young
men made their appearance in Pottstow
and announced that they were the sole
owners of a new process for restoring
briliancy and softness to human hair, no
matter what its age and condition might
be. Printed circulars were distributed
to every house in the town, setting forth
the merits of the process and naming Il
very low price Tor the magic service.
Switches, curls, fronts, rats, mice and
sprays would be ren ovated tor the trtiing
charge of 10 cents each. Some items OF
service were TO i've rendered ut even a
lower figure. The ladies were assured
that the process of renovation should be
conducted with the utmost sccresy, and
that no LADY who entrusted her capillary
wealth to their hands shsuld be given
away" and that the whole thing could
be done inside of three days. Letters
purporting to have been signed by Miss
Anthony, Miss Clara Morris, Clara Louise
Lellogg, President Hayes, Gen. Butler,
and Milton Sayler, certifying that their
back hair had been renovated to their
complete satisfaction, were published
with the circular; and all the women of
Pottstown were for few bret days made
happy. On the next day after the dis
tribution OF the circulars the two young
men, with large covered basket called at
every houe to receive orders and porta-
BILE back hair, curls, &c. They gave
printed receipts for each delivery. Their
collections were simply enormous. Such
an amout of hair transferable at sight in
one small burg was never dreamed of.
The young men were obliged to return
to their hotel sevelal times before their
preliminary work was done. 1t was
estimated that in two days they had
collected over ton Of back hair. This
is simply a rough particularly
rough ON the fair sex. All the ladies OF
Pottstown trusted their hair to these
enterprising young men, excepting few
ladies of African origin.
Then ensued peculiar phase OF social
life IN P. For several days no ladies
appeared IN the street; there was no
shopping done; dry.goods clerks who
part their hair in the middle to keep
their brains cool were des0late; and when
any young man venturcd to call on his
female friends he was informed that they
we're "engaged,' or mot at home," or
"iI." A week elapsed, each succeeding
day OF which was filed with great deal
Of female solicitude. This finally cul-
minated in horror, when it was found
that the brace Of nice young men had
fed with seven large Saratoga trunks
filled with the glory of Pottstown and
womanhood.
/ The human imagination becomes a
slOy coach indeed when il attemDs IN