The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1878-01-27
CHAT BY THE WAY.

CHAT BY THE WAY.
During the FIRST year Of married life the wife Aus
her husbands heart; alter that I'LL his stom.
ach or there will be trouble.
Some people complain because they can't and bread
for their familes; others have given up trying 10
ani u and 90 TO work for II.
Doctor Johnson said that a small boy could climb
an apple Tree, Ill his pockets and get on with impu
nity but tho moment big boy tried to do IL the limb
broke and SO did the boys arm, and all the pious
people said It a judgment The real difficulty,
however, lay in the size Of the boy.
Anger sometimes leads one TO express an housst
opinion OF himselL When q man said, ''That fellow
ought to be kicked by mule, and I'D like 10 do IT,
he allowed himself, In the excitement OF extempo.
raneous speech, TO tell q sad truth
The sugecstivcpess of language Is very remarkable
'who Is the head OF this houseS" asked stranger
OF a diminutivo Scotchman. 'WeeI Sir, II
YEN bde q bit iii tell ye, for Janet and l are
going settle that point" tho answer. It Is an
experience through which every has to pass
sooner or later.
One reason why some men are 80 indifferent abou:
the oit.repcatod injunction to lay up treasure in
Is that they can't understand the propriety Of
putting their money whore they will never see It
again.
Al twenty you know everything; at thirty you
havo your doubts; at iorty there are some things
you don't know; ut nifty YOU are sure only Of your
gnorance and after that you read Mr.. Beech ers
mon everlasting punishment and hopo he Is right
Whom n Baptist minister took convert into the
lake for religious purposes the congregation thought
II would DO impressive to encourage tho exercises by
singing AL appropriate hymn. They looked tho book
all over and last struck up the lively air 'Pul for
tho Shore"
bashtu man will sometimes get terribly mixed In
bis speech biushing youth turned from pink TO
carnation, and wished himself IN an carly grave,
when, In his excitement, ho said, 'That tell
bigger lie than any know - and then, thinking
apology necessary. added ''ot course, present
company excepted"
The most harmless and funny animal IN the world
IL genuine Irish bull. "A Stone cofins Well, that
Is, indade, an Improvement, Tor will last man his
liietime"
The literary critics Of England make great sport OF
Mr. ryndolL They will not admit his originality, out
insist that he Is careful udent Of Professor Draper
VI New York, and is u little gwen to borrowing tho
arguments OF that learned gentleman. Hence tho
BON that Mr.. Ty ndal Is very vapory without his
Drapery
Some people aro not satisfied with getting all they
Tor themselves, but they also try to keep other
folks IRON getting their share. We have watched u
pgsn pigs not only cat the fastest but get their
front lect In the trough, and try 10 spoil what they
can't cut because they are SO full
Free thinking TOR It's logical result free acting
An old gentlimn once struck the keynote OF the
worlds common ia this matter. He SAID to
visitor, ado you believe IN Cod SIR 2" The reply
WIS, God Is a mere notion OF some superstitous
people, which men OF thought have long since aban
doned-" every good, sir; ana may ask II you DO.
levc IN the Ten Commandmentsy' "No, sir,' was
the reply; sthey can he demonstrated 10 be the off,
spring OF barburous age" The old gentleman rang
his bell, ana when tho servant appeared said, "John.
stand by the rack until this person goes. Nothing
is safe when neither believes In God nor the
devil"
II you want to read something which you haven't
Mount.
There Is q significant Spanish proverb which says,
"rhe man who his wedding day starts as iieuten-
aut 10 tho family will never get promoted"
There Is an autopsy society IN PARIS, and each
Der agrees his body the organization Tor
anatomical purposes. There 10 nothing new in .hs.
however, Tor We know ut least u societies Ia
America IN which the members cot each other up DO
lore they acad.
Theology Ia q great mystery, a1d yet Il has some
bottom facts. you have no :ather aud you never
heard OF tho BibieY" ssNo, sin" swell, wnere do
you expect 10 20 toi' al dunno; I've lost my way'
That's tho trouble with most people.
L, is the consciousness of Ill desert that makes
blow hurt That Is u nesaphy scal reinsrx, and va
arc not sure that understand " ourselves still VIC
will rise to explain. A small boy was being severely
thrasbed by the schooimastcr. Instead Of ~himper-
Ing he began 70 laugh. Tho rod came down with u
little more muscular effort. and although the boy
looked serious for moment he soon put ms hand "a
hrs mouth aud burst out iUto another suppressed
laugh. The teacher said, John. why smilest thou'
Tho boy rubbed his wounded shoulder aud thcn snd
with a ehuckle, master, you've iIckoi tho wrong
boyi" Nov We hope our meaning 10 plato.
Brother Odsi says mat ministers arc Knocking the
old belois endwise. When bc gets hold vi text that
Is hard pine xnot he 10 met by the convenient
assertion that II Is all mistransatou used TO ID
como comfort 70 man 10 believe Ia hell, but nov
when dies be hasn't tho slightest idea where Id
wi! 20. Tho SUBJECT Is being discussed with good
deal Of heat naturally, and cvcrybod OF importance
Ia being interviewed, with the hope that he has some
atcr information The theology OF the colored race
Is rather uniquely put an foIlows:-
Brudder Beocner says tor sartn, an his doctrno Will
Just SUIT ger.
Tho, Tor suro doesn't know &c page IRON which u
y ,tsf has been 1otchod.
Da, We pccdn,, hau no trubbie bout the eberlasin
Kase ,anl no matter what yo' does, yo' nsbber will
bs scosched.