The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-01-10

he turned hastily and sought a retired
corner wherein to hide his tears
Rochester IN. W Democrat.
Waiting for Woman to IS Get Ready -
ARE you man?
If 50, you have probably had the
pleasure of waiting for woman to
"get ready" to go somewhere.
Getting ready is mighty operation
for woman to perform. 1t always has
been so; but in these days of compli-
Gated costumes, and innumcrable APP
pendages of the toilet. it is stupen-
dous undertaking.
You are infatuated with Miss b. You
invite her to ride behind your span of
grays. You are wise enough to know
that all women, or the most of them,
admire fine turnout, and would much
sooner be made love to by a man who
owns nice team than by one who takes
his airings in horse-cars and omnibuses.
You set the time at $3.50 p. m. She
sweetly asks you if you could not just
us well come at four. OF course she
would like to go earlier, but she
doubts if she can get ready; and, of
course, as you are not married to her,
you are only too happy to do just as
she wants you to. After marriage, as
the French say, eve change all that, "
and madame must be ready when mon
sieur bids her, or she is left behind.
At precisely four. the next day, you
drive up to Miss BIS gate with grand
flourish. 1t looks old fogyish to be
walking your horses up to hitching-
place, and you have been showing the
animals your whip few blocks back.
They are stirred up by it, and toss
their heads, and paw up Papa BIS con-
crete, and snap at his young shrubbery
in vicious way, and assure you equine
ly that they had just as soon not wait
for q woman to get ready.
You think first you won't hitch them,
for surely she must be ready, but re-
membering former experiences with
those of her sex, you change your mind
and give small boy ten cents to have
an eye on them. You ring the door
bell and are admitted, and the small
boy engages in marble-playing with
another small boy, and trusts the horses
to Providence.
els Miss b. ready?'' you blandly ask
the maid-servant.
She doesn't know, she'll go inquire.
You stand first on one foot and then on
the other, and stare at the hat-tree, and
pull up your new-style collar, which
ought to stand up, but which has de-
veloped an obstinate tendency to lop
down; and you wonder where on earth
that servant has to 60 to enquire, :"
and you run out to see to your horses,
and administer some sharp words to
your small delinquent groom, and he
thumbs his nose at you the moment
your back is turned.
BY the time you get into the house
again Mrs. B. is coming down the
stairs in a toilet made in evident haste.
She is cordial, and invites you into the
parlor, and says Marie will be down in
a moment, and she is so sorry to have
kept you waiting.
From above stairs you can hear the
sound of the notes of preparation.
Much treading back and forth, open
ing of closet doors, shutting of drawers,
seedlings of the maid, in suppressed
toll es, and liveliness generally.
If you could look into Marie's cham
Der you would be in despair. Her
"crimps'' are not taken down, her
boots are unbuttoned, her pull-back' S
elastic cords are out of gear, and the
maid is fixing them; she can't find her
bracelets, one cuffpin is missing, she
has put arnica on her handkerchief by
mistake, thinking it jockey club; there
is button off her basque from hurried
buttoning, and, oh dear! dear! where
are her parasol, and her lemon kids,
and her lace scarf, and that coral neck
chain, and a shawl, and her white lace
vail, and dozen other necessary arti-
cles?
She has hurried 50 that her face is
all in a blaze, and she feels sure she
looks like a washerwoman, and she
seizes the powder-puff and dabs little
chalk on her forehead, and leaves some
in her eyebrows, and hopes it won't
be seen, as she is going to ride out
with a man, and not with a woman.
Women always see all such things,
and speak about them to other women,
and put on an air of Righteousness and
innocence, and wonder how Christian
ladies can powder their faces. But the
corner apothecary could, if he chose,
unfold tale of small boys or girls COM
ing in after sunset to get box of lily
white ''for woman as sent for it,
"Oh, consistency!'
All unconscious of the trials which
beset your charming Marie, you are
striving to do the agreeable to Mrs. B.,
with the sound of your horses paving
up that sidewalk in your ears, and
you know the old man is particular
about his grounds; and directly you
hear something snap, and rush out to
find that one Of your spirited nags has
broken off fence-picket, and is trying
his best on another by way of dessert.
Will she ever get ready?
| You 90 back to tell Mrs. B. that
your horses are so FESTIVE you must
stand by them, and you retire to the
sidewalk, painfully conscious that
across the street, in that big tenement
house. half dozen children and young
people, and as many more idle loafers,
are watching you, and laughing at
your predicament, and telling each 9TH
er that :. that is the chap what is a try
ing to court Marie B., and she's had
nine fellers already, and every one of
'em went back on her."
You consult your watch, five o'clock!
You feel inclined to swear a little: but
early piety forbids, and you try to pos
sess your soul in patience.
The door opens. She comes, radiant
and smiling, in the loveliest of new
costumes, pinned back so tight that
she creeps toward you like snail, and
you mentally wonder how she is ever
going to step high enough to get into
the carriage; and her hat is SO becom-
ing, and her black lace scarf increases
the whiteness of her neck so much. and
she tells you SO sweetly that she is sor-
ry she kept you waiting, that you feel
infinitely obliged to her for doing it,
and feel for the moment as if the high
est and most supreme delight of exist
ence could be found only in waiting for
her to "get ready" kate Thorn, IN N.
T. Weekly.
The Duke of Norfolk drew checks
i In the amount Of &1O0 O00 tn nav for his