Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1878-09-28
A LITTLE OF EVERYTHING,

A LITTLE OF EVERYTHING.
The best time on record-Lunch
time,
Lusterless silks are the most fash
ionable.
Felt bonnets are to be embroidered
with gold.
Every lady arranges her hair to
suit her face.
Cardinal McCloskey's pants don't
bag in the knee.
The only thing that "woe" makes
happy is a lazy horse.
It's mighty ignorant horse that
doesn't know its own fodder.
Maine has gone Greenback Kear-
ney has staid away from there,
Mrs. Sherman dresses the most
gorgeously of any of the cabinet la
dies.
President Hayes never pares his
corns with the best razor. 'Rah for
Hayes!
The Egyptian obelisk has been
placed upon its pedestal on Thames
embankment.
The "King's English" has been
murdered most foully, but still it is
not dead language.
Mrs. Hayes is one of the most
sensible women in the country. She
doesn't use red chewing gum.
Rev. John. Jasper is subject to
dizziness. And still he insists that
the world doesn't turn round.
The Post man has won the good
will Of his contemporaries OF the press
by calling them all "Colonel."
An Iowa agriculturalist recon,
mends corn as fuel. We suppose he
takes it in the shape of whisky.
Using perfumes, powder, false hair,
etc, with matrimonial designs, was
once prohibited by Parliament.
What is mango2-Cleverland
Leader. 1t is a sort of kind Of
something that Tilden demands of
Hayes.
If there is anything in this world
of a more uncertain tenure than a
minister's salary, it is a woman's
thimble.
A young man from neighboring
town broke off an engagement be-
cause the girl named her pet calf
after him.
Dennis does not believe in the
old adage, that silence is good
substitute for wisdom. He thinks
that noise is
Doctors say that people who howl
the loudest suffer the least pain.
Has Dennis Kearney corns, or boil
ia the wrong placel
Bob Ingersoll went to Scotland,
and the pious people there thought
his bald head was occasioDed by
shaving the horns off.
1t is reported that most of the ice-
cream sold contains poison. We re-
publish the statement for the bene-
fit OF impecunious lovers.
Women will not hold office in the
Episcopal Church hereafter, as they
must be twenty-five years old before
they are allowed to do 90.
A woman in Baltimore commit
ted suicide the other day, leaving a
letter to her husband asking him to
let her be buried in her blue suit.
When a man returns home at night
and kisses his wife with more than
ordinary tenderness, she may be
pretty certain he has been into mis-
chief
If you want to have man for
your friend, never get the ill-w:ll of
his wife. Public opinion is made
up of the average prejudice of wo-
mankind.
An enterprising Iowa man has
named his daughters Time and
Tide, so they will wait for no man,
and have got first mortgage on
matrimony to begin with.
Tell us not in mournful numbers
that this life is but dream, when
girl that weighs one hundred gets
outside a quart Of cream, and wants
more Elmira Gazette. Life is real,
life Is earnest, and the girls know
what they need, but on cream they
are the durnest to show their grit
and greed. No encore.-New York
News. Let us, then, be up and do
ing, with heart for any fate; but
naxer LET us no wf.oino uirls that