The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1878-08-08

his head, and proclaim himself another
royal Bengal tiger Of the southern mines.
''Then are heard ten or twelve short,
sharp reports. The lights are blown out
by the conclusions. The rival Bengal IL
gers shoot about at random, in the dark,
ana hit everybody save themselves. The
uuhurt portion OF the company scramble
behind the bar and under the billiard ia
bles, and cry out, Don't shoot this way =
When the barrels OF both 1evolvers are
e:nptied, the combatants clinch, and, as
| they IMAGINE, cut each other all to pieces
with bowie knives; although. when the
lights are broght, it turns out to be some
body else. Then the two royal Bengals
shake hands, fraternize over drink, and
60 off together to the gunsmith's to get
their pistols reloaded. The survivors
pick up the dead and wounded. There is
great deal Of talk over the affair tor sew
eral days. The bodies are kept until Sun
day. then there is splendid funeral
The Odd Fellows, the Masons, the militia
ry companies and the temperance socie-
Ties all turn out with music and banners.
The Sunday school children. dressed in
white, appear in the procession, singing,
There is happy land, tar, far away etc.
"The minister breaches very affect
ing discourse, and is very careful not to
say anything which may wound the feel
ings Of the two Bengal tigers, who stand
in the front pew overlooking the collins,
as chief mourners, he lding together by
their left hands the same hymn book,
while they sing out Of it, while the right
Of either grasps his revolver, ready to
send bail through the clerical organ
ization should he say anything IN the
funeral sermon personally offensive to
them. Everybody for twenty miles
round comes on horseback or in buggies.
The saloons and shops do good business
and the day commonly winds up with a
grand ball and supper. All the young
ladies are proud to dance with the two
Bengals, all the young men envy them
and resolve to kill somebody at the first
convenient opportunity. Before morn
ing there are probably two or three
more "tatal ARRAYS" and SO the life and
excitement peculiar to our free, and easy,
unconventional society is sustained from
month to month and year to year.
"When all this Is over, subscription
generally put on foot in the camp for
erecting monuments over the graves, and
when the money is all raised, the man to
whom it is entrusted goes 60 San Fran
cisco to buy the marbles, and there he
falls in with old friends, and drinks,
sprees and CANDLES all the money away.
II he comes back and makes confession.
either we blow the top of his head off, or
we say mo matter. Ii you had good
time it is just as we'll. Bob, Jim and
Tom will rest quite as easy without any
monuments Then we put over them a
cheap wooden tombstone, with pretty
verse printed on it. These boards, after
a few years rot away at the lower end,
and the goats and cows pastured in our
camp burying ground. rub against them
and knock them over, anG finally we
gather and split them up for stove kindl-
ings."
They liked this sketch of California
life. They ,elished it. They picked its
very bones clean.
AT a certain social gathering, the name
Joaquin Miller was introduced.
"Miller has been engaged in some
ARRAYS, suppose" said gentleman to
me.
said. ale had slain many men,
burden Miller with every sort Of
crime. 1t does him no injury, here. A
little blood gives his poems game rel
ish.
"Do you know Millerl" he asked.
Il do. He was my friend; but
Here became agitated and corrugated
my brows. l continued, Il wish never
to meet that man again. III do"
Here my right hand travelled involuntar-
lily toward my Derringer pocket. 1.-THE
truth is we once mad fought in California
with double-barreied shot-guns, at six
PAGES. We have not done fighting yet
the war has scarcely begun. The next
gale that sweeps from the PATH beg
your pardon. but if We meet again and
no matter where we meet-the affair
must be brough to final conclusion. /
trust the coming ARRAY may never occur
in any quiet British household. because
l cannot back down nor back out of the
customs of my native West. With us
the contingencies involved BY the doc
trine of personal responsibility knows no
suspension by reason Of time, place. cir
cumstance, or company. We will fight,
be it in the church. theatre, or BY the
hospitabIe fireside of the stranger. And
among our people, upon such occasions.
every one feels in duty and honor bound
to take all the chances of being hit by
the stray bullets which the combatants
may distribute among the company"
British society insists ON providing
the bloody niche for the Western Amer
lean. Why not fill it, The British pub
lie demand that we smell of blood. bowie
knives and the sulphurous vapors of the
pistol When mar finds ready made
for him such robe of dark and tragic
hue, should he not wear ESPECIALLY
when the public insist ON admiring him
wrapped. stern, bloody, vindictive and
sanguinary thereinl like it. l never
harmed man, woman or child: yet, how
feel permeated by the reckless, life-scorn-
ing murder loving spirit of my country
men. count my victims by the score:
see them weltering in the usual gore;
travel through my private metropolis; !
visit my own private dead-house, full of
my slain, IS vet unclaimed, unrecOgnized.
1t was just after Lady Macbeth
spilled sOup on the front breadth of