The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1878-06-18

VI CoHtilluc WHeH sue Ihlscu ueL uubu
index finger and said: ..IIenry Winter
Davis Sprigging, them are eggs are
mine the hens what laid 'em was mine
the corn what fed 'em was mine, and
Use going to have trail on this ere
dress as long as Betsey Gowen's, il
every toe on your feet turn to gum
bles. Now, shut. And you, young
ster yank off four yards OF that are
calico, or you will hear the humble bee .
huzzing."
The old man shut, and the clerk yam.
ked off the calico.
rg- The measels prevail 10 such an
extent in Dardanelle that the schools
have closed.
Miss Tabitha A. Holton 10 the first wo-
man ever admitted to the bar in North
Carolina. She is the daughter Of :
81 clergyman andis but twenty-five years
Queen Victoria's new salooa railway
car is one Of the most beautiful Of its
kind ever built, as may well be imagined
from the fact that its construction and
fittings cost over $4,000
Mrs Holbrook is an active partner in
the New Orleans Picayune Company,
She not only assists in the business man
agement of the paper but also writes for il,
editorials, sketches and poetry.
Don't be satisfied with one good deed
or one victory. but string them together
like so many pearls, one after the other.
A soldier came TO Sir Charles Napier,
saying, Sir Charles, we have taken
standard" He thought his share Of the
work all done, but Sir Charles expressed
his appreciation of what had been accom-
plished, and then quietly added, "Now
go and take another. IN. Y. Herald.
Ex- Two ladies' in North East, Md,
were fined S5 each for whispering in
church. Presently women will not be
permitted to inspect each Others bonnets
in church, and then there will be general
row.
Robson latter long whist bout Ut
the club It's awfully late, Brown,
What will you say to your wife? Brown
Tin whisper -Oh, l shan't say much,
YOU know: GOOD morning DEAR" or
something O. that sort. She'll say the
rest!!.-[P Punch.
A Eureka {Nevada) man thus sum.
marizes his objections to the Moffett
bell punch: "Who 10 blazes wants =
fire alarm turned on every time he takes
drink !"
A shrewd old lady said Of her minis
ter, "He never told lie in the pulpit"
This is different from the experience OF
the little daughter OF a we'll known
BROOKLYN dominic. He was once tell
ing most marvellous story, at which
some Of his hearers expressed thsis
doubts, The little girl said: "Now, pop.
say, is that really true, or is it only jus
preaching?
"Could We lind me the loan Ut pipe
and tobaeky'" said Pat; IL have .
match"
Poorly fed fowls give inferior eggs.
just as cows on poor pastures yield sky
blue milk and little cream. Fowls never
do better than when they have free range
and access to grass or roots. which they
consume abundant, together with insecss,
seeds of weed aud grain.
No meat 10 healthier than mutton.
No meat can be produced so cheaply.
1t can be slaughtered at any time, 70
curing bnt few minutes for the opera
ton And yet not one farmer in ten
keeps sheep.
Smith does not think that his daugn.
ter's beau should stay so late in the even
ing. The other morning she was prais.
ing the young man for his strength OF
character. YES" said Smith, che hasa
great staying powers"
They are telling Of man In Dnoo.
que who buried two dozen bottles OF
whiskey in his cellar twenty years ago,
and forgot all about them, and when tney
we're accidentally dug up last week, the
whiskcy was found to he superb. How
peapie will lie The man may have
buried the whskey in his cellar, outf
forgot about il, it was because he vas
struck by tightening or hanged the noxs
day,