The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1878-04-30
Sfuse and Nousense.

CD
Sure way to turn peoples heads-late
to church.
Good Advice.--Say nothing about
yourself, either good, bad, or indifferent
Let the bent ofthy thoughts be to mend
thyself rather than the world.
he who can suppress a moments an
ger may prevent days of sorrow.
To be dex rous in danger is a virtue, but
to.courfdanger is weakness.
Checked trousers with patches on the
seat will be worn much this season.
"Hoi for the Westl' says a Pitts
buy<t,r. Yes! and it's hoe after you
getssE
Thepraises Of others may be OF use, In
teaching US not what we are, but what we
ought to be.
"Tom, what In the world put matri-
mcny in your head ?" "Well. the fact is,
Joe, was getting short of shirts"
Nothing that is not real crime makes q
man appear so contemplate and little in
the eyes Of the world as Inconsistency.
Spare minutes are mighty laborers if
kept to their work. They overthrow or
build up. enrich or impoverish man.
sAlittle boy went to his father crying
the other day, and told him that he had
kicked bee that had splinter in its tail.
Men are frequently like tea-the real
strength and goodness are not properly
drawn out until they have been in hot
water.
+ 1t takes 2,l60 bees to gil pint cup, not
withstanding single bee takes up SO
much room in q, fellows summer trou-
sers leg.
When ayoung lady works blue zeph.
Eyr dog with pink ears and green tail, on
canvass, should she be arrested for cruel
ty to animslsi
Mrs. General Gains being asked how
she retained her youthful feelings to the
age ofover eighty years, replied, "Soap
and a clear conscience"
The wife of Peter vasslief, Rus sian
peasant at Moscow, has bourn SO children.
She had four at birth at four diff eren,
times, three at seven times, and Two al
sixteen times.
Some school girls in Pennsylvania
were attacked by rattlesnskes, and fright
ened them away by fsunting their red pet
ticoats. Dear, dear! why didn't Eve
think OF that.
An Indiana lecturer remarks that "the
|pulsste wave which oscillates the earth's
ecliptic brings as to the wonderful vigor
ofspring." This is not giving fair count
to sassafrss tea. 49,
To some people religion isn't religion
unless it sour. It is not necessary to
drink vinegar all your life because you
wanttp beiieyeia God and live an homes!
lie. Religion and dyspepsia are not sy.
nonymous terms.
There is dog at Swift Falls, MINI
that keeps his masters family supplied
witt fish, He has been known to take out
as many as thirty pickerel in day. When
he espies fish he will make dive and be
sure to bring it out
At the end of the first year comes the
"cotton wedding" explains an exchange
And that is not the only thing that
comes at the end Of the first year. Some
timespoverty comes, sometimes the moth
er.in-law, and sometimes twins.
A Harrison Sunday school teacher wal
telling her scholars the other Sunday
about bad boy who stole hundred dol
lars, when she was interrupted by one oi
her auditors with the query, "And hov
| the dickens did he get such bull,
chance 2"
A man named A. j. Coshow, while
gathering pecan nuts in Gonzales county
Texas, few days ago, saw from hi
perch on the limb ofa tree something gilt
tering on the ground below. 1t turned
out to be Mexican silver dollar, ant
digging at the root of the tree he unear.
$4,000 worth OF the coin.
The Hawkeye says that after a maj
who has always maintained the highest
standing in the religious community has
once run across the back yard after dus
and tried to cut the clothes-line in tw'
with his chin, he always has to explain to
his horri6ed wife that he got into the habi
of swearing in the army.
Itappears that there is better systeh
of cremation in Madras than in any othe
part Of India In Bengal, dead bodies arr
placed on an open funeral pyre, whic
speedily gives forth an unpleasant odol
while vultures and dogs hover round
But in Madras the bodylis put in sor
of mud pie, and baked until nothing re
mains but the calcined bones, which ar
duly cast into the Canvery.
| A Minneapolis boy was sent by his tes
i cher,a woman,to the superintendent to b
whipped. The lad suspected the con
tents of the note, and hired boy he me
on the street to deliver it, giving him te
cents. The superintendent didn't dis
cover till after the castigation was owe
that the boy he had flogged, had not see
the inside of school house for over
month.
4 Senator Anthonyis becoming fat an
feeble. His eye has lost its fire and hi
step its elasticity. He entered the bod
}, in 1859, and is the oldest member in unir
terrupted service, although Hamli
scores more years of Senatorial exper
enCe. They are the only members of th
Senate who witnessed the departure an
return of the Senators from the rebe
| lious States.
i In the spring the young mans fancy
u Lightly turns to thought of-What2
And the first whe dares to answer
Will be shooted on the spot
/ -Roreester Press.
;. Get your shooting iron ready
al We are tired of worldly tolls
i In the spring the young mans fancy,
Turns to find cure for boils.
Fulton Times.
d Parents are often puzzled TO help the
children when they get beans, buttons
t etc., in their noses The Medical Recor
t says: "Blow the pstient's nose for hin
|, by clossiug the empty nostril with yor
finger and blowing suddenly and strongl