davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
The PennileSS Man,

Blessed is the man who is penniless,
for be IS never stricken for dollar
The dead head annoyeth L him not.
neither is he pursued by the vendor of
Hitchcock's analysis.
He is not grasped by the lightning
rod seller The lunch fend turneth
away from him. The trinket vendor
passeth him by.
He hath no friends to "treat," he is
poor and hath no enemies.
When he riseth in the morning his
stomach is not rebellious from over
feeding; neither doth he click his silver
and say: How shall l get rid of these
dimes ?"
When he eateth he is not vexed by a
multitude of dishes.
When the bookseller paradeth the
street and shouteth Tor purchasers, he
passeth meeklv by, for he knoweth that
he is not the kind of customer wanted.
His lands will never take unto them
selves wings, neither will the fire de-
YOUR his water lots.
He is not perplexed about taxes, nei-
Their careth he for the rise in lumber.
He hath no ties for money; there
fore, careth not to demonetize; never
theless dime be will not refuse, nor
turn away. from a five center.
Yea, a gherkin will he relish, and
storm the outworks for steel clad bis
cult.
Yea, even the itinerant canvasser for
Redpath;s History passeth swiftly by
him on foot and selleth not unto him.
He loveth none but himself; he is
selfish; yea, fond of fish, CLAIMS in chow
der, oysters raw, Holsters in vinegar
! will he not despise.
He maketh his lair in bar-room; he
squatteth il a keg while it is day, and
sleepeth in a barrel at night.
Where the scent of the whiskey is
there he is found; he snufeth the lunch
with frenzy and crieth ha ha at the
clink of glasses. He liveth like ring
tailed monkey, and dieth like a spotted
| jehosaphat.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24

1t was the foot of the young burglar
The left shoe was otf-the stocking also.
The high white instep was uncovered,
and on it she saw the little tattoOed w
with tiny cross beside it. 1t was her
son who lay there
Martin ~ she screamed again,
% Martin, remember what I told you.
He had not us to teach him what was
right-remember."
But Martin only moanod.
"He is dead, and [ killed him ~
He felt blindly for his pistol "For-
give me. Agnes, for | cannot live," he
said; but at that moment the woman,
with her hand upon the breast of the
PROSTATE man, screamed out:
g. His heart beats-Martin-he lives !"
The next day strange story flew
about the neighborhood The child
those two strange people had lost wears
ago, had returned to them. That very
night burglars had entered the house
and wounded him. His life was in
danger. The doctor had been there all
the morning, but the mother had no
fears.
"God had sent him back, and he
would not die" she said. .
1t is never too late for repentance,
and the love Of those poor parents was
very strong. Strange as the beginning
was, the end was peace, and the house
hold, SO strangely reunited, was happy
one at last-NeW York Ledger.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24

ner teeth about the eight month The
centrals, or those which first make their
appearance, are shed between two and
a half and three years; the laterals are
shed between three and half ard four
years; the corner teeth between four
and half and five. About this time
or a little before the tushes are full
grown, the animal is said, in horse
mans phraseology, to have full mouth.
| We come now to the important part of
the subject, where an animals age is
determined by the appearance of the
| black spots, or more correctly, the in
! fundibulum. The infundibulum or
black marks are worn out of the supe-
rlor Or smooth surface Of the lower jaw
at 6 years old, and that of the lateral
are commencing to disappear, and is
| com pleted at the 7th year, thus at this
age we find the wearing surface of both
central and lateral inferior teeth smooth
the black marks having been worn
away by attritlon, and the marks of the
corner teeth begin to disappe ar, and
have entirely disappeared when the
animal becomes 8years old. The horse
is now considered tagged" and no con-
scientious veterinary surgeon or horse
man would positively assert the ami
mails age, only approximately. Some
people aver they can determine the ex-
act age by signs other than the teeth,
but such indications are unreliable. As
the annual advances in age his teeth
gradually grow long, and appear to be-
come more horizontal. The mouth
which at 5 years old was cup-shaped,
now loses this appearance and becomes
elongated. The teeth which were, in
the age last mentioned, nearly perpen-
dlcular, are now slanting, and this pro-
cess appears with advancing age. As q
horse becomes old the enamel loses it's
original beautiful whiteness, and as
sumes a cloudy or smoky yellow in
stead, and becomes striated with brown
and black marks, and the tushes infre-
Quently drop.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
On Bathing.

Halls Journal of Health don't believe
in too much water, for it says on the
subject of bathing; once a week is often
enough 1Cr a man to wash himself all
over, and whether in Summer or winter
that ought to be done with soap, warm
water and a hogs hair brush, in a room
showing at least seventy degrees Fab
renheit. Baths should be taken early
in the morning, for it is then that the
system possesses the power Of reaction
in the highest degree. Any kind Of
bath is dangerous soon after meal. or
soon after fatiguing exercise. No man
or woman should take a bath at the
close of the day, unless by the advice of
a family physician The best mode of
keeping the surface of the body clean
besides the once week washing al
ready mentioned, is as follows: AS
soon as you get out of bed in the morn
ing, wash your face, hands, neck and
breast; into the same basin of water put
both feet at once for about minute,
rubbing them briskly all the time; then
with the towel. which has been damp
ened by wiping the face, feet, etc., wipe
the whole body we'll, fast and hard, with
mouth shut and chest projecting. Let
the whole thing be done in less than
five minutes. At night, when you go to
bed, and whenever you find yourself
wakeful Or restless, spend from two to
five minutes in rubbing your whole body
with your hand, SO far as you can reach
in every direction. This has a tenden-
cy to preserve that softness and mobili-
ty Of skin which is essential to health,
and which too frequent washings will al
MAYS DESTROY
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
Keep Your Honor Bright.

A Boston lawyer was called on short
time ago by a boy, who inquired if be
had waste paper to sell. The lawyer
had crisp, keen way of asking ques-
tons, and is, moreover, methOdical
man. So pulling out q large draw
er. he exhibited his stock Of waste
paper. N,t F."
"Will you give me two shillings for
that?"
The boy looked at the paper doubt
ingly moment and offered fifteen
pence.
"Done," said the lawyer, and the
paper was quickly transferred to the
bag by the boy whose eyes sparkled as
he lifted the mighty mass.
Not till it was safely slowed away
did he announce that he had no money.
No money! How do you expect to
buy paper without money!"
Not prepared to state exactly his
plan of operations the boy made no
reply. $500
asked the lawyer.
eyes, SIR
Very well; ifyou consider your note
money, but if it isn't good l don't want
it,"
The boy affirmed that he considered
it good; whereupon the lawyer wrote a
note for fifteen cents, which the boy
signed legiblv, and. lifting the bag of
papers, trudged off.
Soon after dinner the little fellow re
turned and producing the money, an
nounced that he had come to pay his
note.
WELL" said the lawyer, this is the
first time that | ever knew note to be
taken up the day it WAS given. A boy
that will do that is entitled to note and
money tho; and giving him both, sent
him on his way with a smiling face and
happy heart.
The boys note represented his honor.
A boy who thus keeps his honor bright,
however, poor he may be in worldly
things, is an heir to an inheritance
which no riches can buy-the choice
promises Of Cody. Y. School Journal
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
Humorous.

During the siege Paris subsisted on
horse-hesh. Now it lives on strangers.
-New Orleans Pickya,ne.
A point we'll TAKEN" quoth a sneak
thief, as he artfully bagged fine lot of
antique lace .-Eacharage.
A placard in the window of a patent
medicine man III Paris reads as follows:
The public are requested not to mis-
take this shop for that of another quack
just opposite
Chief Joseph declines the proposition
to send twelve of his young braves to
college. He fears that at college they
will learn to fight and shoot at sopho-
mores and thus become bloodthirsty.-
Albany Aryus
No one can fancy the feelings of q
newspaper man when he hears a delin-
quent subscriber whom he has but
| twenty-four hours before vainly i'm
plored to ''settle that little bill" veil
out on Sunday, 9 Put me down $50 for
the good Of the cause" when thew are
raising the church debt"
Professor: Define the equator. Stu
dent: 1t is the place where the sun
crosses the line. Professor: What line :?
Student: | suppose its the one referred
to by Euclid, that has neither breadth
nor thickness. Professor: Next. Student
No. 2: There's no such line It has
been shown to be purely imaginary
mere superstition of sailors Column
bus sailed across it, and it wasn't there.
The government is going to send
New England bank cashier along with
the Howgate Arctic expedition. When
the ship reaches an impossible icefeld
the cashier will be set out upon it. He
will break it up, and find the nearest
route to Europe in about ten days.
Then the ships can follow him. Bur-
Hmgton Ha1ukeye
:Got any COW bells?" Eyes, step
this way" "Those are too small.
Havnt you any larger?" "No sir. The
large ones are all sold" Rusticus start
ed Oft. and got as far as the door, when
the clerk called after him: "Look here,
stranger, take one Of these small bells
for your COW, and you won't have half
the trouble in finding her; for when
you hear Der bell you will always know
she can't be far off," The farmer
bought the bell.
A young and pretty girl stepped into
a shop where a spruce young man, who
had long been enamored but dared not
speak, stood behind the counter selling
drapery. Iii order to remain as long as
possible she cheapened everything, and
at last she said, 81 believe you think I
am cheating you" ooh, no." said the
youngster, 3" to me you are always fair"
"Well," whispered the lady, blushing,
as she laid an emphasis on the word,
q would not stay SO long bargaining if
YOU We're not so dear"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
AnchOrjng a Horse.

They tell a good story of an old
mariner who keeps little hotel down
here writes a correspondent from
Coney Island, New York's seaside
resort.) His wife was very anxious to
have horse, an animal in which the
old gentleman took but little stock, and
the old lady finally won her point, and
got her horse. =. -
The steed was of an cratic and
playful disposition, and used, on the
least provocation, TO tear madly along the
beach, and succeeded in. splitting the
lady out several times. At last the
captain, who had never driven the
beast, volunteered to break him of his
vicious habit; so getting another old
salt to aid him, he procured a kedge
anchor with a stout line attached /
- Fastening the end of the line around
the axle, and putting the anchor in the
wagon, the fiery untamed was hitched
up and the two old gents started out
for drive along the shore. Soon the
vivacious charger spied something
which gave him an excuse to run away,
and Immediately dashed off with fright
full vivacity.
The captain dropped the reins and
summoned all hands to let go the
anchor" The anchor was let 60, and
caught firmly in the sand. The unsus-
pecting quadruped, pranced cioyously
along until he got to the end of the
rope, and then he paused naused SO
suddenly that the wagon was demol-
ished, and the two old gentlemen shot
up into the air like a couple of sky
rockets, coming down in a fearfully di-
lapidated condition. rfrT TT r
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
A Novel Garnet Shaker.

,.;"' Your husband is, sick a good deal OF
late, isn't hep remarked an Illinois
woman to another, one day last week,
EYES," answered the wife. ''he's got
TUX down mighty hard with them ere
ager shakes again. On p'y1.A II 700
shud thinkit'ud be. sorter distress
sin like ter haze him round the house"
remarked other, ~sympathizingly,
spec lly when yer. at beuse, eleanin'."
f'iWal, 50 it wua be," replied the wife,
in self-consoling tones, "but when he's
got into one of his chills, and want the
rag carpet shuk, yer see he's a power
full an art hand ter hitch onto it."
Then the tother woman wendell her
way home, envyingJher neighbor the
knaek. she had of utilizing her hus-
bafl(i.@ ~ s&s3@ ~ w. - sss'- -
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
WHAT OF THA z?

Tired! Veil. what of thats
Didst fancy life was spent on beds of ease.
Fluttering the rose leaves scattered by ttht
breeZes
Come, rouse thee work while it is called to-day
Come, arise! go forth upon thy wayl
Lonelyl And what of that?
Some must be elyl tits not given TO all
To feel heart responsive rise and fall,
To blend another life into his own. ~
Work may be done in loneliness. Work on.
Dark Well, and what of that?
DiGst fondly dream the sun would never set?
Dost fear 70 lose thy way? Take courage yeti
Learn thou to walk by faith and not by sight;
Thy steps will guided be, and guided right.
Selected.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
Retaining Subscribers.

An indignant subscriber to a news
paper went into the office a few DAYS
ago and ordered his paper stopped be-
cause he differed with the editor in his
views of subsoiling fence rails. The
editor conceded the mans right to stop
his paper, remarked cody, as he looked
over the list:
edo you know jim Sewers down at
Hardscrabble"
Every WE'LL" said the man.
"Well, he stopped his paper last week
becauselI thought farmer was
blamed fool who didn't know that tim
othy was good thing to graft on buckle
berry bushes, and he died in less than
four hours"
."Gracious is that SOP asked the
astonished farmer.
{" Yes; and you know old George
Erickson, down on Eagle creek ?"
"Well, I've heard of him."
well" said the editor, gravely, che
stopped his paper because he was the
happy father of twins, and we congratu-
lated him on his success so late in life.
He fell dead within twenty minutes.
There's lots of similar cases, but it
don't matter; I'll just cross your name
off, though you don't look strong, and
there's a bad color ON your nose"
's6ee here, Mr.. Editor !" said the sub
scriber, looking somewhat alarmed, ]" [
believe Til just keep on another year,
because | always did1ike your paper and
come to think about it, you're a young
man, and some allowance orter be
made" and he departed satisfied that
he had narrow escape from death.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
AGRICULTURE.
A SWARM OF BEES,

b patient, b prayerful B humble, mild
wise as Scion. b meek as a child;
studlous, b thoughtful, B loving, B kind:
* sure you make matter subservient to mind;
cautious b prudent, B trustful B true,
+ temperate in argument, pleasure d wine,
b careful in conduct. of money. of time,
B cheerful. b grateful, hopeful, B firm.
b peaceful, benevolent, willing to learn;
courageous, b gentle B liberal B just,
b aspiring B humble, because thou art dust;
B penitenC, circumsppct, sound in the faith,
B active, devoted, B faithful till DEATH
b honest, b holy, transparent and pure;
b dependent, B vlrtaous, and you'll B secure
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24

A STRANGE adventure was that of the
three gnls, aged respectively Is, IA, and
Ii years, who ran away from their
homes in Toronto, one of them taking
$40 from her uncle's trunk to pay ex-
penses, and came to, New York to join
a disreputable show. ' They are now in
the care of the authorities, and will
soon be returned to their homes, which
they are now anxious to see. 1t is the
old story of unwholesome reading ~s
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1878-07-24
Hanging the Mayor of BOdmin.

In the regin of Edward the sixth
there was an instruction in Cornwall
on account of the alteration of the reIig-
ion, and the country was placed under
martial law, which in those times con
sisted simply of a Provost MarshaPs 60
ing about and hanging up whomsoever
he pleased. Of the Wanton manner
in which Sir William Kingston, the
Provost Marshall on this occasion, ex-
ecuted his commission the following
memorable instances are recorded
One Boyer, Mayor Of Bodmin, had been
among the rebels not willingly, but by
compuision. Kingston, without in
curing into the circumstances, sent him
notice that on a certain day he would
come and dine with him. The Mayor
made accordingly great preparations
for receiving the Marshall, who failed
not to come at the time appointed. A
little before dinner the Marshall took
the Mayor aside and whispered him in
the ear, "That an execution must that
day take place in the town, and that a
gallows would require to be set up
against the time the dinner should be
done" The Mayor promised that one
should be ready without fail, and gave
orders to that effect to his officers.
Meanwhile a sumptuous dinner was
served up, to which they sat down in
the greatest good humor imaginable.
The Mayor spared no effort to please
his guests, who seemed on his part as
| if he had never been more delighted.
When the entertainment was over the
Marshal taking the Mayor by the hand,
requested him to lead him to the place
where the gallows was. They according
ly walked forth hand in hand, and on
reaching the spot the Marshal asked
Boyer if he thought the gallows were
strong enough. ooh, yes" answered
the Mayor; doubtless it is" "Well,
then," said the Marshal, coolly, :" get
you up speedily, for it is provided for
YOU" Nay" rejoined the Mayor,
you mean not as you speak."3u" L
faith" said the Marshal, there is no
other remedy; you have been a busy
rebel, SO get up instantly" "And So"
add the. chroniclers, initiating in their
style the brevity of the atrocious deed
they record, without respite or defense
was the poor Mayor of BOdmin hanged"
To TAKE Dents OUT OF FURNITURE.
If the dent is not too deep it may be re-
moved in the following manner: Wet
the part with water; then take five or
SIX folds of brown paper, well soaked
and lay upon the denied place. and
upon this hold hot hat-iron till all the
moisture is evaporated. Should this
not entirely remove the dent, repeat
the process once or twice. 1t will re-
quire but one or two applications to
| raise the denied spot level with the sur
| face. Or, if the dent be very small,
merely soak it with warm water, and
apply alared-hot poker very near the
surface;i keep it constantly wet: and in
a few minutes the dent will disappear.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1878-03-06
the Contents a. a Lump OF Goa,

For wears no one supposed that a
piece Of soft coal dug from its mine
or bed in the earth, possessed any
other quality than being combusti-
BILE, or was valuable for any other
purpose than as fuel 1t was next
found that it would afford q gas,
which is also combustible. Chemic-
al analysis proved it to be made Of
hydrogen. In process of time me
chanical ingenuity devised mode of
manufacturing this gas, and apply
ing it to the lighting of buildings and
cities on a large scale In doing
this other products of distillation
were developed, until, step by step,
the following ingredients or materi-
ais are extracted from it; | An ex-
cellent oil to supply lighthouses.
equal to the best sperm oil at lower
cost. 2 Benzole-a light sort Of
ETHEREAL fluid, which eyaporates east
ly, ana combined with q vapor or
moist air, is used for the purpose of
portable gas lamps, so called 3.
Naptha-- heavy auid used to dis
solve gutta-percha, india-rubber, etc
4. An Gil excellent for lubricating
purposes. ). Asphaltum-a black,
solid substance, used in making var
nishes, covering roofs and covering
vaults. 6. Psrafne-a white crys-
tslized substance resembling white
wax which can be made into beauti-
fulwax candles; it melts at a tempera-
ture of one hundred and ten degrees,
and affords an excellent light. All
these substances are now made from
soft coal.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1878-03-06

o. grand about 'em. reckon it
makes everything pear sort of
small
Mrs. Brandt tC Id Joel about it that
evening.
Il just took the two Of them up to
the shanty, and,opened the door, and
you'd cried to see how pleased she
was with everything. And | told
her to kindle FIRE and I'd fetch up
bit o. supper And when | car
ried it up and left, just came
back and stood on the step till saw
Brice comm home. He was walkin'
slow as if his feet was a dead
weight, and when he took bold of
the door he stopped minute, look
in over the valley kind o. wistful
and hopeless / guess she heard him
come, for she opened the door, and l
turned around and came in. Bar
bara Brandt says /, you've seen
your see.' IfGod wants to look at
that, l suppose He has right to
nobody else has. that's certain
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1878-03-06

AT Bodie, Mono county, on Tues
day afternoon, Jack BrasIan and a
man named Blair, who have for some
time. been in partnership in their bus
iness Of mining aud prospecting, met
in the bar room Of Pollock's boarding
house and commenced an angry dis
pute concerning the terms of a GER
tain location they had recently made
They were both under the Influence
of liquor, BrasIsn more so than Blair.
After quarrelling for some Zine
Braslan exclaimed that be was chief.
which claim Blair disputed. saying
that he was willing to fight him at
any distance, from a handkerchief
length 20 forty PAGES. This chal-
lenge Braslap-whose pistol and
belt were lying on the floor short
distance from him-accepted. asking
for tine to heel himself - which he
proceeded to do by buekling on his
belt. The two men went out into
the street, appearing more pleasantly
disposed toward one another than
they had been at any time during
the day. Placing themselves less
than eight feet apart, at signal from
one they both fred effectively, Blair
being struck on the shoulder and
Braslin in the side. After the first
shot they both fred rapidly, until the
reviewers, cash six shooter, were
emptied After the smoke of the
twelve rapidly fred shots cleared
away both men appeared riddled
with shot, blood from the wounds
crimsoning the snow at every step
they took. Neither seemed to have
been satisfied with the result, each
starting for fresh pistol. Braslin
returned 10 the bar room and Blair
started around the corner Of the
house, where he secured another pis-
tol from an acquaintance, with which
be returned to the bar room and shot
Braslan in the abdomen, inaicting
wound of which Braslan died in
about fifteen minutes. After firing
the last shotBlair fell to the floor
from the great loss of blood. He
was moved to the cabin of a friend.
where, upon examination, be was
found to have been shot in four diff
ferent places.-Nerada Transcript