The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1878-10-25

1t was the funniest dnner.party that could
be imagined. Five highly respectable monk
eys in full dress sat at table with plates and
wine glasses, and the sprighticst, most atten-
tive of monkeys waited upon them, tray in
hand like good, highly gentce waitress, as
she was. --rr
The monkey at the head of the table was
dressed as a naval officer, with admral's hat,
epaulettes, and side whisker' all complete.
lie was very elegant in his manners when not
licking his plate, and he had an injured, re-
proachful way of turning ON his seat and look
ing at the waitress when She failed to bring
what he wanted, that was wonderful to see.
At the foot Of the feast sat a farmer monkey
in funny felt hat, white smocll and loose trou-
sers Tie had tremendous appetite and soon
finished hi, meal and began knocking hard up
on the table for more. The admiral, who was
very proud never once noticed him which the
hungry farmer accepted in good part, as he
didn't take any very great interest in admrals.
But the side of the table was livelest, after
ALL In the middle sat fine monkey-lady,
| "Hpu 4 dlNClhdlu ltdluci was Cdilcll WITS.
Lorne," and the monkey gailants on each side
took turns in conversng with her. Sometimes,
indeed, they both addressed her at once and
then the fashionable Mrs Lorne would utter
fearful screcch and give them peice of her
mind, to the great terror of the farmer and the
amazement of the admiral. She was lovely
creature in their eyes, you may be sure, for
she wore red velvet dress and white bat
with bright pink feather and her coQuettish
way Of tossing her head was quite irresistible.
Wine was freely taken by all the guests, but |
learned later that it was only raspberry juice
and water. twas funny enough to see them
take up their glasses in one hand bow to each
other,toss off the contents, ,aud pound the table
for fresh supply.
could not see what they had to cat but it
evidently was something good, for they smack
ed their lips over it and grabbed bits from
each others plates 50 often that their master
frequently wa. Obliged to cxpostuate with
them. ,.-
All, the master forgot to speak of him.
He was their servant just then, and stood at
a respectful distance behind the table lottle
in hand, ready to Gil their glasses when ever
called upon, or gently to reminl the guests that
to lick ones plate is not looked upon as good
table manners, VI antmo the petty waitress
skipped about, bringing this thing and that as
the master ordered, and often sinking into
little chair near 10y for rest aud solemn medi-
tation, The dear thing was easily "Auster.
ed, and the manners Of the admiral some-
times so confused her that She seemed almost
ready to faint, At one time when the master
put pair of lighted candles in her hands, bid.
ding her hold them very care fully, she sprang
up aud ran from the stage with them othup
side down, til blazing aud spattCr.rg Now aud
then the temptation tOget biz from the table
grew 50 strong that she would watch her
chance to take a sly grab when the que SITS
were chatterng together. When she succeed
ed in this the huudreds ofsptclators would ap-
plaud heartily, We children thought il was
rather improper for grown persons TO encour-
age theft in that way, but We could Mt help
feeling sympathy for the pretty waitress, not
withstanding our good morals.
From an aceol nj 0ffAe McNlcy 7heafer, 6y
Mrs.. Mary Napes Dodge, ST. Nichoias Er
Asv.