Stevens County tribune. (Morris, Minn.) 1877-1880, 1878-12-19

AuO ASdtSSl SOLuC lllSu ever COLuC 10 u
buck-saw is when their teeth are ON edge.
The holiday season approaches, when
young man must show his gift enter
prise.
tits quite appropriate that new books on
Pottery should be illustrated with plates.
The fat man who wants to become an
h-fat should study the architecture of a
lean-to
The man who pays in advance cannot
pc trusted. Let this be warning-N.
y o. Pic.
A bouquet is good centre-piece for
the dinner table,--BOstOH Commercial BuI-
ittfn.
Whisky is about the only enemy man
has succeeded in really loving Daa6urg
Neiss.
Layman- A man who halts between
two oppinions is lame on both sides of
the question.
With many of our contemp oraries, last
years jokes are this shea 5 j)kes.-Neo
York Nelcs.r
The fellow whe got intoxicated with
delight has been turned out of the tenn
perance society,
Those cordial Michigan lumbermen
are again slspping buzz saws on the back.
N. ?. GrGphie.
Economy is wealth. Even the stove
pipe is coming out with last winters
soot.-BOston Transcript.
A writer may draw on his Imagination
for good story but the draft is not al
ways honored.-N. 0. Pie.
Here lies"-any graveyard will furn-
ish you abundant opportunities to see
how the tOmbstones do it.
A Western paper explains. 1t didn't
/, mean to say that "Msyor Shocks was
tight" but that he was right.
There wouldn't have been any milk in
the cocoanut if some of our dairymen
had the construction of it.
The only finished thing in connection
with the Washington monument is the
''fund."-Chieago Journal.
The Press club of Boston have been
enjoying a big dinner. II was stuffed
club when the rePast was over.
The title of "a. B. Is very cheap in
Detroit. 1t has practical significance
there, meaning "a hummer"
Resurrection day will have to take a
back seat unless this body -snatchlng
business is stopped.-N. Y. Star.
Which is the oldest, the man who
asks question or the man who answersl
The man who asks, because he is the
querist.
The New York burglars and grave
robbers only need newspaper organ to
secure them firm footing and fair share
of business.
What is the difference between Ger.
tain Emperor and a drunken man2 Ones
Titus an emperor, the other tight as 6
brick.
"What do you want to shoot quail or
the ground for2" bowls sporting journ
al. On the ground that we can't hit am
anywhere else.
A vsrdant old lady in New jersey
thinks the ice crop will be good thi
year, because there hasn't been mucl
frost to iDjure it.
The borrowing fiend, who is always
little short of change, ia an enemy t
whom no quarter should be shown
Neso Orleans Pteayune.
''Gentlemen, there's no use talking,
remarked the man to a crowd on a corner
and then he talked away for half an hou
without apause.
Some little time ago Sunset Cox toll
the world ':Why we Laugh" II is nov
time for him TO finish his job and inforr
the public why we weep.
The upstart that rose to point of Oh
der after sittingdown upon the aggressiv
end of pin was assured by the cha
that the point was well taken.
A thief who fell into fit of abstractio
ard got lost in thought, after wanderin
while in his own mind, found himself
last in the arms of policeman.
A hard money enthusiast says he new,
met woman in his life that seemed
know anything about coins. He ney'
Standardization Gazette.
"Wouldn't you call this the calf of
!egG" asked Bob, pointing to one of b
te.her limbs. 'No," replied Pat, :
,hould say it was the leg of calf
A child's faith--While a mother VI
brooding over her poverty, her lite sc
said, mamma, think God hears wht
we scrape the bottom of tho barrelt'
The following classical poser is su
mitted for college boating clubs: D
Leander swim the Hellesponr, or d
Hero2-NeO York Commercial AdUertis,
If there was anything practical
spirituallism Stewart could give the .
Lcemen rap and some information co
corning the disposition of his bones.
". O. Pic.
A grave Observation-Disclosures fresh frc
his club: MY good sir (hic), can you t
me where this W (hic) way leads to?" s
date party: ITO the chu-ch-yard."-F
When a young man comes 10 belle
that glass of liquor is a daily necess
he must soon quit drinking and attend
business, or quit business and attend
drinking.
The very last curiosity spoken of
the papers is wheel that came off q do
tail when il was Vaughn. The man "
discovered it has retired from pub
life.
Strange, isn't it7 Smoke good eli
and you will never hear word about
but light one of those four-for-ten. Gel
and everybody within hundred va
will talk about it.
A new invention is phosphoresc
paper, by means of which writing
be read in the dark. It is reccomme
ed for spring poets, who sigh for wo
that bunny. O. Pic.
Many man has been known to
ricn by buying sixteen ounces to
pound and selling twelve ounces to
pound. 1t is poor rule that wont W