The Portland daily press., 1878-06-28
The Troubles OF a Poet.

While Colonel Bangs was sitting in his office
one day, man whose brow was clothed with
thunder entered. Fiercely seizing chair, he
slammed his hat on the table, hurled his um-
brella on the floor and sat down.
",Are you the editor?' he asked.
"Yes"
"Can you read writing?'
"Of course"
"Read that, then," he said, thrusting at the
colonel an envelope with az inscription on it.
-, said the colonel, trying to spell it.
"That's not B. It's an S" said the man.
IS; O., yes; I see. Well the words look
little like Salt for Dinner or Souls of Sim
ners,'" said the colonel.
mo, sir" replied the man, nothing of the
kindi That's my name-Samuel II. Brunner.
knew you couldn't read. 1 called to see you
about that poem OF mine you printed the other
day, on the 'Surcease of Sorrow"
81 don't remember" said the colonel.
"Of course you don't, because it went into
the paper under the infamous title of Shear
case Tomorrow
"A stupid blunder of the composition sup.
pose"
about. The way in which that poem was mu.
tilated was simply scandalous. haven't slept
one night since. 1t exposed me to derisioD.
People think l am an ass. Let me show you."
"Go ahead" said the colonel.
"The first line, when l wrote itf read In this
way:
Lying bya weeping willow, underneath gentle
That is beautiful, poetic, affecting. Now how
did your vile sheet present it to the public?
There it is! Look at that! Made ID read this
way:
Lying to weeping widow, to induce her to elope.'
Weeping widow, mind you'll A widow? This is
too muchi It's enough to drive man crszyP'
"Pm sorry, said the colonel; but"
but look.a-here at the fourth verse;" said
was: N
Dirt - - WV
wrote that out clearly and distinctly in a
plain, round hand. Now what does your
composltor do! Does he catch the sense of that
Deautliql sentiment? Does it sink into his
soul! No, sir! He sets it up in this fashion,
Listen:
Cast thy pills before the sunrise and love them IL
they hurt
Now isn't that a cold-blooded outrage upon
mans feelings? I'll leave it to you ii it
isn't
"Ips hard, that's fact" said the colonel.
And then take the fifth verse In the orig
inal manuscript it said, plain as daylight:
Take away the jingng money, 1t is only glittering
A man with only one eye, and a cataract in
that could have read the words correctly But
your pirate up stair there, do you know what
he did? He made it read:
Take away the jeerlng monkey on sorely gan-
BY George, felt like Draining him with fire
snovei! never was so cut up In my life.'
1T was natural too" said the colonel
Ihere, for instance, was the sixth verse; 1
wrote:
Tam weary with the tossing Of the ocean as 1t
heaves.'
1t is lovely line, too; but Imagine my horror
and the anguish OF my family, when opened
your paper and found the line transformed
into:
am wearing out my trousers till they're open at
the kneesP
That is little too muchi That seems to me
like carrying the thing an inch or two too far
think have constitutional right to murder
that compositor; don't you?"
II think you have"
Let me read you one more verse. I wrote:
hills,
And feel my soul awaken to the ecstasy that
Now, what do you s'pose your miserable ont
cast turned that into? Why, into this:
Ismsll the flying shoes as they roass along the
whirs.'
Gibberish, sir! Awful gibberishl must sIay
that man. Where is he?''
..ae is out lust now" said the colonel
"C0me In tomorrow"
armed.'' oA'
Then he put on his hat, shouldered his M
brela and drifted off down stairs.