Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1878-12-27
FUN.

HIS GOOD MEMORY. --"Now, Leander,
my dear. want you to lie sure and not
forget these few things when you come
down tonight says tie young wife, just
before the kiss and goodbye at the
summer hotel, in the morning, as the
gentleman was starting for the city.
And this is the way the list ran:
/. Two yards of blue barege. III
Three yards of Hamburg edgings.
3. My new braid from the hair-store. "a
4. Half-a-dollar's worth of nainsook.
5. Box Of pearl powder from my upper
drawer.
6. Modern Minister" from Loring' g
Library.
Arriving in town he forgot all about the
list until late in the afternoon, and then
he could not find it in any Of his pockets
But hadn't he read it over? and didn't he
remember it all? OF course lie did. And
this is what he took back to his expeetant
wife: Dsy-os5
u /. Two heads Of blue cabbage.
2. Two yards of handsome netting (mos-
quito). f.
3. Some blue braid.
rs 4. Half-a-dollar's worth OF canned soup.
5. Box of gun powder and PAIR Of
drawers.
6. 'sLoring said he hadn't got any such
book as Can and Canister in the
library" ,1TaT N PINT.
Exclamation on receiving the above:
"Oh! Leander! You must have dined
at that horrid club again. or you could not
have such mistake!"3
When the streets are as mud dy as yes
terday, and the cars are full OF ladies'
coming and going, the trick played by
man yesterday on the fourteen ladies in
Woodward avenue car, should be frowned
upon by every true citizen. Ii again at
tempted he may get himself into trouble.
He boarded the car with rubber shoe il;
his pocket, big enough to fit over No.
covhide boot, and at proper moment,
when all eyes were turned on the Car
switching past, he dropped the rubber on
the floor and then suddenly pretended to
see it. Bending over and picking it up he
called out:
(which of you ladies lost this rubber?''
Every face turned pale at the size of it.
and each lady gave the other shy
glance -1 O. Lao '-.-57-
..Some one in this car lost this rubber!''
continued the human hyena as he waved
it around.
Not lady moved. Each one wonder
ed if one of her rnbbers had dropped OFF,
Int her mind was made up to wade in
mud two feet deep before claiming that
one.
ssThe owner can have it, charge no
thing for my services calmly observed
the iend as he looked down one side Of
the car and up the other. tt
Not a hand was raised, but all feet were
drawn under the seat, as if by machinery
sVery well.'' said the man, as he rose
nm to leave the car. ''I'm rubber shoe
ahead. It won't do the loser any good to
call at my office, or to send boy and
basket after this shoe, for won't give it
up.',-D etroit Free Press.
couple of little fellows were over
heard as they sat in the sand on the sunny
side Of the schoolhouse, talking as follows:
..Say. Tommy, did you notice mother
shake her head at me when she passed the
n;e at dinner to-day?'' stYes,n answered
his companion. "what did she do thai
forpn "She always does that when we
have pie and company. She wanted me te
rafnse pie. 1 didn't. though, this time
and when 1 go home tonight I'll get this
oar vanked out about an inch and half
= and then comes the goldarndest larrupin
on nv bare legs, and all for that sting!
piece of pie T. ..-t. sn-...e
uHorE OF us.''-An old gentle man O.
o. and his bride. aged 50, entered a rail
way car the other day and took seat by
stove. A youth occupying the seat be
hind saws he overheard the following: on
s5 Gentleman to his bride-''Who's it'll
1ambp,5 Bride--'sBofe of u.s.
s.what is that?" said a Sunday schoe
teacher. pointing to the letter ..
.-.sDruno.' - said the urchln.
..nhat do YOU say when you stumpyou
toe?' o,,,,.
greedy man should wear plaid coat
an as to always Keep cneck Oh IL
stomach. s9a @@sd .'-+iI
z e was Job who first remaFked' =" ~
.yntims belong the Dolls