The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1878-08-17
Al Sorts.


Was waited Ger the river.
A raining favorite-au umbrella.
Bathing suits especially at this
season.
The whoop-skirt--skirt of the In
dian country.
A man behind the age should be
fed on catchup.
A marked change-A silver quar-
ter with hole in it.
A Texas editor boasts of plums
as large as a girls heel.
A spirit wrapper-The paper
around bottle of whiskey. -
A miss guided man--the defend
ant in a breack-ef- promise case.
A dogs bark may he worse than
his bite, but we prefer the bark.
We have all heard Of patience on
a monument but physicians usu-
ally plant theirs under one.
When the pound master gets 50
cents for shutting up vagrant hog,
is that animal fees-ance in Office?
Mary had little corn,
Upon her little toe.
And every where that Nary went,
The corn was sure to go.
A Young man who is given to
athletic sports would like to know
when the much -talked-cf Anglo-Sax-
on race is to come of.
AS they passed gentleman whose
optics were terribly on the bias, hit
tie Dot murmured: "Ma, he's got
one eye that don't 60.
ssWhat's that. man yelling at Z"
asked an Illinois farmer of his boy.
"Why,n said the boy. she's yelling
at the top Of his voice.
A girl in Waukegan, on the Fourth
of July, swallowed twenty percus-
caps. Her mother refrained from
spanking her for fear of an explo-
sion. ~
| After a man gets to be thirty -eight
! years old he kan't form any new
habits much. The best he kan do
is to steer his old ones, says Josh
Billings.
The proper time for girl to mar
nv is when she has counted up her
cash and found that she can support
herself in case her husband turns
politician.
ssDo you call man kind who re-
mits nothing to his family while
aFaxl said an Yctor.. eyes. un-
|. Temif Isng kiadness," was the reply
. .of Jthtvid. -
ssJenny. What makes You such Q
) had girl r. swell, mamma, God
} sent. yoa the best children he could
find. and if they don't suit You,
can't help it,
1t was about this time Of year
when the little boy expressed the
wish that he was built like . hen
coon. ont of laths, so that the breeze
could blow right through him.
The following correspondence ex'
plains itself: dear Mrs. Jones'
Please let me have a half dozen to
+ matoes if You can-Sallie Smith,
, .Dear Mrs. Smith--We are not go
| ing to can; we propose to pickle
/, Hannah Jones"
A Mr.. Damn runs a large stove
store mp ut Eagle Harbor, aud thu
!. Marquette Journal says: "He mus
q have an extensive trade, for we hav'
4 heard his name mentioned in con
!, nection with all the stoves am
stovepipe we ever put together, her
5 or elsewhere"
An Austin (Texas) bachelor benz
: twitted by some ladies with his sin
|. gle state, and asked how 1t was tina
n he had never married, said: .
i don't know exactly how it is. but
a have always felt an indispositiol
: to marriage, and l can't see why
n should he, either. surely don
e inherit it, for my father and mothe
a were both married"
a When a youngster tries to trlc
u the whole family at once, he does
: by abruptly asking, at the table
'e ''Say pa, we know that old man ths
u: lives up on the Dodgetowp road
"a Then there is general opening
: mouths, and pa and all the rest ben
le forward with straining eyes an
D want to know 'sWhy, what's 81
III matter with him r The boy ALLOW
m them to reach the hight Of impatiel
:. interest in the matter, when he COO
re announces .'Nothin', pa: J. on
10 wanted to know il you knew HIM
IN that's all.r, Aud s'the little upstar
n catches up his hat and PUSHES out
the house with chuckle, while
sorts OF applications indicative