The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1878-12-18
A Married Mans Misery.
detroit Free Press1

A man of As having a wooden leg and the
look OF one who had suffered long with the
toothache sat down in the chair vacated by
the boy aud after smile of announcement
began:
'It matters don't mend pretty soon IN
either murder her or take my own life."
domestic trouble, i supposeP' Queried
Bjah. =.
That's It, sir; and Pm getting desperate.
left home thinking I'd jump from the
dock; but happened to think of you, and
SO / thought I'd ask advice" f.
lis the bread heavy?'
BLAST the breadl can stand heavy bread,
sloppy tea, raw meat and half cooked pota-
toes, but l can't and won't stand this infer
nal whining complaining and jawing
aroundr'
Fellow traveller along the tow path of
Times broad gauge canal, l think see the
pint. You have been married about two
years2'
"You are fifteen years older than your
wifeT'
"Yes-eighteen."
"You have a wooden leg, and She
she-?'
''She hasn't, but 1 wish she had two of
'emw
"She likes good clothes2"
"You betI"
"She likes the mad whirl of society-Sl9
bonnets, reserved seats at the opera, SIS boots,
forty button kid gloves and trains on her
dresses"
"She does-that's her to dotl' exclaimed
the husband.
"And you prefer your home-evening
fire, newspapers, snow apples, game of check
ers, glass of cider, cat on the hearth, and SO
on?'
That's the sort o. man am, sir, and she
harnesses me to death She's on the trot all
DAY and on the CAD ali the evening, and if |
demonstrate she says l want to make slave
and a prisoner OF her,
Don't you go along with her to the thea.
ter and psrtiesP
Il used to, but for the last year she's got
awful particular about my wooden leg; says
the public will think was shot while steal
Ing chickens"
"Does, Ell? And you sit at home and keep
your heels warm by the cook stove while she
gallivantsp
THE same, sir; and now what shall do
about 1t? Something has got to be did, and
that right off. I'll be hanged to Davy Crock
EFT If put up with 1t another day. You are
an older man than 1 am, any you've had
three wives to my one, and I'll do just as
you say about it,"
"Fellow-man, you have been wrong from
the beginning" slowly answered Bijsh, as
ne looked out of the window IN a weary
half his age is d. I. deceived fried-cake) at
the start. Youth may reverence old age.
but love isn't reverence. Youth and old
age don't like their taters cooked the same
way, and the man who says they do is for
ger. They don't see alike, and it's a cat and
dog life. Then, again, you have a wooden
leg, and you should have married q woman
with g ass eye or broken nose as an off
set. In that case, neither party has any
thing TO twit the other about III / was to
marry again, bald headed as / am, should
look for lady wearing No. 10 gloves and
No. shoes as an offset Do you love your
wife?'
"Well, to be honest about It, don't think
either of US are dying of love-"
Then, my friend, you go home and have
a candid talk, divide up the things and part
good friends. Give her the largest halt,
throw in some small change, and see
that she gets safe home to her mother BY
and by you can quietly secure bill of d.
yorce, get on some store clothes, and look
oat for q woman of fifty that has the rheu-
mates so that she can't CAD"
That's honest, is it?'
Honest Ipjun. III you can't live happy
together don't hesitate to live happy apart
No use in any scandal or hard words, but
divide UP and call it bad mistake. This
killing ones self on account of domestic
troubles is all bosh."
and begin the dividing up bushes. Thank
you, Bljsh; may your feet never stop grow
ing a reward for this"
When he had departed Bijah took short
cut through the alleys, and presently gained
position from whence he could view the
house where the man lived. Developments
did not tarry. The husband had not been
in the house five minutes before ne was sud-
denly rushed out again, hat and cane flying,
and his share of the things consisting of
three hat-irons, a kettle and two bricks,
overlook him before he could dodge
$50 young and so artessl'' unused Bijah,
as he turned away; land yet that last brick
thumped him between the shoulders just as
purity as II I'd thrown it myselfP