The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1878-06-22

Alebh D ANtSo'
The Empress of Austria wears a
train thirty feet long, and two misera-
BILE small-boys have to carry it.
This month is called "leafy June"
because in it SO many fashionable peo-
pie leaf for the watering places.
The New Orleans Picayune divides
writer's in two classes: Those who think
and those who think they think.
1t is said that eating onions will
prevent the lips from chapping. Most
girls prefer the chaps.-BreakfaSt Ia
Ole.
An editor offers reward of five
dollars for the best treatise on " How
to make outdoor life attractive to the
mosquito"
Now digs the boy the garden plot
With energy intense,
Until he bags a tribe of worms,
And then he skips the fence.
- YonkerS Gazette
The lady who can't buy 166 silver
buttons to adorn her street suit must
expect to have the street cars stop in
the middle of the block. Detroit Free
Press.
Floral Internationally What do
you cauliflower when you ask for it?''
Detroit Free Press. You don't cauli-
flower. You called the woman and aster.
-Keokub Constitution.
The man who has never seen two
women in Shaker bonnets trying to kiss
each other has never experienced the
rejuvenating power of laugh that
could throw him down.
-"What shall be done with the sill
Yer dollars?n walls New York paper
in alarm. "Send 'em out here and
We'll give you hogs for emp responds
the Chicago Inter- Ocean.
Ills now the poverty stricken young
man discovers that his white stove-pipe
hat of last summer cannot be cleaned,
so he adroitly puts deep mourning
band around it.-Watd oats.
"A Yonkers On. Y little girl swal-
lowed her toy balloon downward. 1t
slipped into her windpipe, partly filling
whenever she breathed, and, as no re-
lief could be afforded, she was choked to
death.
Mr.. b, did you say or did you
not say, what said you said? because
c. said you said you never did say
what | said you said Now, if you did
say that you did not say whatI said you
said, then what did you say?
After serving twenty-five years in
the Iowa Penitentiary for crime that
he never committed; Mr.. Graham has
been released. He is now lunatic,
and any remarks he may make con-
corning the intelligent jury will doubt
less originate in his mental unsound-
ness.
The Fremonts can hardly be so
destitute as they were recently reported
to be, since Washington paper an
nounces that " Ensign Fremont, son
of Gen. John G Fremont, has married
a Miss Anderson, of G. street. The
bride will accompany her husband to
Paris
The Chicago Tribune has a horri-
BILE story about girl, twenty-five years
of age, whose head resembles pigs.
We are willing to bet very old
but handsome mucilage brush against
Tribune editorial that that girl is a
boy, and that he lives in Chicago.-N.
Y. Commercial.
The pitcher that goes often, etc.
George Primrose was killed in rail-
road accident on Long Island last week.
He had been blown up once in a pow
der-explosion, once his head was laid
open in a railroad collision, and when
the Brooklyn Theater was burned down
he escaped so narrowly that his boots
were burned.
"A Connecticut lover young and en-
thusiastic, who sang and played for
nearly two hours before the house of
his lady love the other evening, was
electrified is, shocked-after q
short pause, by cordial "thank you,"
gracefully pronounced by the "other
fellow" who appeared at the drawing
room window.
May is a good month for assas-
sination of rulers. May 4, 1847, La
Riva tried to shoot Queen Isabella, of
Spain; May IA, Henry w, was assas-
sinated by Ravaillac; May 20, 1912,
Queen Victoria was fred upon by
Francis; May IL, 1912, Bellington as
sassinated Mr. Percival in the lobby of
the English Commons; and May IL,
1873, the Emperor William was fired
upon.