Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1878-03-27

II.
A baxom little dear,
He fenced her In with both his arms
And whispered in her ear,
% Now do promise thee, my love,
Neer from thy side TO 90;
For like all bakers, little one,
Idaily need my doe"
-Yostev's Gasstte
! LOUISIANA has paper called the
Mischaccbe.
! WE send our Taylor to Germany tosee
how he will suit her.
/ A wFLLKNowN girl of the period
En- Bexzle. M
"CLERGyMEN," remarks an exchange,
"like railway brakemen, do : ksessdsal
Of coupling"
The English language is inadequate
to express the forlorn feelings Of the boy
who thinks he has stolen dime novel
and finds it to be cook book.
The New York Erpress is becoming
personal. 1t says that to operate canals
| by steam would retire donkeys enough
t. stock two or three legislatures.
THE difference between = sailor and
theatrical manager is that the former
likes to zee . light house, and the latter
does not.
A TREASURY clerk fell off ladder and
broke his leg the other day. These are
dangerous times for officials in high
places--N r. (,ommerciak
CHLOE (vainly attacking . trill)-
" My third finger isn't good for any
thing" Strephon-" Pardon me. It's
good to put ring on."-Harvard LAM
p0On.
GEORGE FRANCIS Train was 20 anx
ious for fame when young that he used
to shout his name in the bunghole If .
barrel.-Boston Post. And has spent the
rest of his life in "hooping it up"
The Oil City Derrick has it, opinion of
persons who use Latin. There il the
phase "ad infsitum." No man who
spells item with ~" it thinks, should
set himself up - Latin scholar.
A COLORADO man who was caught in
q mow-slide and carried mile and
half likens the sensation to man being
shot from cannon along with barrel
of -four.
A BLIND man entered Whitehall
restaurant yesterday and ordered coiIee.
We are informed that this blind man
then actually took a cup and Aw-sir.-
Whitehall Times.
A NEW HAMPSHIRE postmaster who
refused to lick ON postage stamp for m
old lady learned, when 1t had been alter
ed, that she had left him 4lO, 900 in her
will. His tongue now hangs out 10 the
public.
The Whitehall Times has discovered
that the difference between "seyen
up" player who has played three spot
on two, and boy who goes of in bad
company is, that one has led his tray
while the other was led astray.
A HORSE furiously attacked bis
mate" in Detroit stable, says the De
troit Free Press. This custom Of feeding
horses on "mate'' is repreheniblc; It
makes them savage.-Jevsey CITY Jour-
mall
A WISE correspondent writes to ask us
why the winters of 1898, 1908, 1878, 1928,
1888, 1848, 1858, 1868, and 1873 should
have been ~ they have besn-unusually
mild? We can't imagine, unless because
they were temper-8.
THEY talk of the extraordinary con-
nubial happiness Of those cremation Pit
mans, and yet the very last thing the
woman indulged in was . retort. Then
her husband corked her up forever
Philadelphia Bulletin.
in" "Yes," interrupted Filkins,
"more jaw in this house than in the
combined showcases of the Bowery dem
tists." An ominOus silence has hung
up its football on the doOr-mat-N y.
Neps.
QUIrE the Historical Cheese. Inquir-
ing mind" Auntie, dear, what became
of Romulus and Remusr Precocious
Tom-"I know-they were sm0thered
in the tower by order of that wicked
Duke of Double Gloster. ."-P PHsch.
A LAWYER, returning to his olice,
said complacently to his assistant Mr..
Peetkin, the world looks different to Q
man when he has three inches Of rum In
him." eyes" replied the junior; "and
he looks different TO the world
You can teach boy that If Re plays
the three and four domino ON three,
leaving the six exposed to the other end,
it counts ten, in about Ave miuutes; but
it will take him all day at school TO learn
that four units and six units make ten
units.-ROme Scntimek
WAGNER concludes an autobi0graph
ical sketch thus: Then for the first
time saw the Rhine, and with bright
tears filling my eyes, IswoFe, poor artist
that | was, eternal faithfulnem to my
German fatherland." It was some time
ago when he was poor artist.
A SEvENrK BrREET lady sent her lit
tic boy to drag store the other day. 70
Z a. III