Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1878-09-19
Wit and HuD2Ov.

There are more p's than anything else
in pepper.
An Incorporate printer is a typographi-
cal err-er.
Let the ice cream. .-Fochester Democrat.
Let the lemon ade Whi!thaU Times.
The aind of dentists THIS country wants
is those that extract teeth without PAWN.
One tramp near Knoxville shot another.
That's new departure that ought to be
encouraged.
Ingerso!l has bobbed Otto Europe, but
hell is too we'll established in tie old coun-
try for Robert to shake it.
Il was mistaken in that house" said n
tramp. IL thought I'd be able to get Il
warm meal there, but only got cold
sho"lder."
The question has been asked: "Can
Christian go to tie circus?" Yes, until lie
is married. an! then in most cases the cir
Gus comes TO him.
We have Just been thinking how lam
guage came into tie world. 1t was during
Adam and E,e's first quarrel, when one
word brought on another.
Somebody has discovered that whenever
tie grain is cut and hauled in, the tram"
makes his appearance Oh the stubble AMI
demands work or bread.
An Illinois lawyer who charged widow
S25 for making on, Il bill of sale. reduced
his BIZ! 10 50 after tie widow brother had
taken cI lis coat.
4 81. Louis couple "ere recently mar
ried willie tic thermometer was 90 In ihe
shade. 1t viii be OF interest to scientists
70 watch this conpi. and see if their first
child is well or rare Gane.
AT Amherst College, some students fast
ened live goose on the presidents ), chair.
Upon observing it, he said: ''Gentlemen,
| perceive you have a competent instruct
or, and will therefore leave you 10 your
studies"
A young man objected to the young girl
that his rich old uncle wanted him to mar-
ry. "You mustn't lie so particular" said
the rxasreratcd unLle. IL tell YOU she's
well enough $50 she is, uncle" re-
sponded tie nephew, land you know yen
always taught me to leave well enough
alone"
Don't tell man you sweat. It is vul-
gar. Inform Kim that you are being de
prived Of f:lc saline and olea"inous fluids
OF your material substance through the
excTetOries Of your pellucid cuticle, with a
sensible condensation OF moisture upon the
sui uIelticial exterior.
An Austin CfeX.l bachelor being twitted
by some la'!.es with his single state. and
asked low it was HAT he lad never mar
r;e,i. sail: 8! don't know exactly how it
is. but have always felt an indsposition
TO marriage. and cant see why it should
be, either. l surely don't inherit it, for
my father and E.ot:ier were both mar
ried."
An Irish soldier who pridcd hia,selfupon
his bravery said lie had fought at the bat
tie of Bull Run. When asked if he haC
retreated and made good his escape as
Others did on that famous occasion, he re-
plied BE jabers, those that didn't run
are there yit."
Olive Logan writes from Paris that the
next sensation is 10 hc about ladies' stock
ings. Our proposed visit to Paris is post
poned until the sensation dies out. We
never did care to get too near q sensation
especially Il sensation" that is open
work from over the knee. and so transpar-
ent that laties will have to wear silk
stocking over it.-No7rist to,0n Herald.
A Baptist and Methodist were discussinr
the relative differences OF their respective
church governments, when the barlshell
gentleman remsrkeG: Il don't Ike your
Siethodist church government one bit.
There is too much machinery about it
We'll. that's SO. There is great deal Of
machinery about U.S." replied the Al. E.,
but then it don't take near as much water
to run it as yours does"
1t is stated fer fact that an Irishman
and lis wife. in Massachusetts town,
we're discovered at secluded pool bus.ly
engaged washing the halt-doZen dirty
Youngsters Of their household. and, on be-
ng asked the reason for such unusual
>cr,,bbing. they replied: .It's poolin' our
isliues We are at. as Dinnis directs, and
there is sOrra made of it, shure."
Butler (Den.anin F.) has left the Repub-
lean party, and this reminds us of the In
.iiyislr! who YVES very sick. sending for
minister. The minister Intercepted the
sick man. an! finally said: ''My frien!,
you seem to he very near deaths door, and
| likely to be called away ut any moment.
Are you willing to go?' "Ies." replied
the sicl. man. ''perfectly willing" ''Thar',
Sod" replied the minister. ''all the neig...
.ors are willing too.'-Boonton Weskl,
| Bulletin.
To C;cnn Steel or IrOn.