The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1878-10-02
WIT AND HUMOR.

Wax figures do not lie.
Made of awl workshops.
A taking person-the policeman.
Who can understand a cornstalk?
The chap with glass sigh-the topper.
Fruit for the poor house-the paw-paw.
The tramps favorite sweetening = loaf
sugar.
Man proposes, but-he Is not always ac-
cepted.
Purple and fine Observation-Disclosures and
napkin.
An orange peel-the yell of crowd of
Orangemen.
eight pounds
Song of the cheese-"Win you love me
when mould?"
What is it that man with two eyes can
not see with one? T'other eye.
PUCK thinks that the dollars of the novel
lists should be called storied earns.
Why is it, do you suppose, that cow al
ways laughs when she meets milkman?
Positive wait, comparative waiter, super
lative get it yourself.-Boston Transcript.
Now let the wild charge on the oyster beds
begin. Hip! hipl-a rawl-New Haven Reg
lister.
A western paper advises lightning rod
| agents and book canyassers to try their luck
| In Memphis.
There is a man in Washington the most
powerful in the country. He carries h2rse
| scar on his cheek.
When may mans friends naturally sup
pose that he has gone amissing" When he
has gone acquiring.
| A Louisville reporter of the old school
once wrote of a man who had been "over
taken by the bitter pill of adversely"
man in western Iowa, who is candidate
IOr three offices, has invented method of
shaking hands by postal card.-Hawkeye.
The national game is still spreading. Even
| in some of our churches they have their reg
ular base bawl every Sunday.-Boston Tran
script.
California Chinaman who found a mug
| get of gold was at once declared a heretic
robbed of his wealth and run out of the
neighbolhood.
| Nowl-Rome Sentinel. How?-Rochester
| Express Hawthorne Sentinel. That's
stew good to keep. Pass it along.-Bridge-
| port Standard.
You can get a very good idea of natural
selection" in its practical workings, by view
| ing a celery glass after it has been once
around the table.
If you are stung by bee, use hartshorn;
il bitten by snake, get drunk. So physi
clans say. Oh, hang bee sting; give US q
snake bitel-Cincinnati Breakfast Table.
| A beautiful example of force of habit is
to see disciple of Murphy fill his glass at
the hydrant and dreamily blow the froth off
the innocent water before drinking.
Edmund Yates loves a cat which eats at a
| table with its master. This is the only dark
stain on the cats otherwise irreproachable
character.-Burlingto Hawkeye.
| The age of Man" furnishes an interest
| ing field for speculation, but by common
| consent the age of woman is a matter which
| is left entirely to faith.-New Haven Regis.
| ter.
The government now propose to weigh
| whisky instead of gauging il, and individ-
| uals will now be heard calling to bar-keep-
ers: another half pound of that ere Bour-
| bon."
Eli Perkins gives an account of the con-
| versation between a male and female idiot
| Eli does not mention the name of the wo-
man he was talking to.-Louisville Courier
Journal
Who would be candidate for the govern
orship and fardels bear whatever fardels
are) when baseball catcher is the hero of
the men and darling of the ladies, with
$1,000 year2-Boston Transcript
Mrs. =. says she 10 much disinfected with
her new residence caparisoned with her old
one, which was on the road to populous
symetry, where she was enlivened some
times by seeing dozen funerals in a day.
A chap OF reckless language, speaking to
us regarding the late "crash," said that the
bankrupt law was a sort of crash towel for
wiping out Indebtedness" He went out
before active measures could be taken.
Kidd Is the name of Beaconsield's physi.
| clan. He charged the old man $3,5 for
repairing his health at Berlin. The doctor
finds his business about as profitable as his
namesake, the captain, did in former days
A colored preacher In Norwich while ago
| gave out the following announcement:
''Brothers and sisters. next Sunday, the Lord
willing there will be baptzing in this place,
the candidates being four adults and three
adultresses."
IL was probably young man from Middle
| Haddam who made bis first advent TO the
metropolis by the midnight tram, and re-
spectfully asked the night clerk OF the Astor
house .'if IL would'be any trouble 10 Mrs.
Astor to keep him all night"-Hartford
Times
Defenceless citizen (afrald OF burglars. 10
his housekeeper. on retiring for the night;
"There, Mrs. Binks II they attempt to come
In here, you see, the bell will ring, the dish
cover will be thrown down and the coal
scuttle Will be upset; so I've no doubt we