The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1878-01-24
The Man with a Dog-A Story Told by
Bob Bnrdette.

when man mas once 1alleh slaVe
to the dog habit, when he has become
addicted to dog, when he drags dog
around after him into cars, into omni- !
buses, into society, all the Murphy move |
ments in the world can not reform that
man. And there are such men. Oh,
millions Of 'em. ~-4A sEta. Eai Il
Wednesday night bridal party
boarded the train at Elizabeth, New
Jersey. l heard laughter and weeping,
and knew that laughter and weeping
never went well together, except at
weddings. So said, speaking to my
sef-the only man who never contra
diets me when I tell lies-"I will have
look at the young people went out
and looked. - "a OA&
saw the bridegroom, happy, laugh
ing, fussy as an old hen with her last
lone chicken, holding black-and-ta tan
dog tenderly in his arms, and clutchings
his bride by the elbow to help her oiithe'
car. The brakeman shouted:
s'Hold on; take that dog to the bag
gage-car." ..-
Dismay, CONSERVATION, terror, came
out and sat all over that young mans
face, but it frightened up again with a
happy thought. He dropped his BRIDES
arm, and folded both arms about the
dog of his heart - Jtkl&lI Ill IL
mo, you don't!" he shouted; ''no,
you don't. I've got letters for that dog.
I've got letter for that dog from the
Superintendent of the division This dog
goes with me.'
And he danced UP and down the plat
wifi xxyhil 40 10
man helped his bride on the train, land
then the young husband followed, cling
ing to that precious dog.
Now, do you know | wanted to take
that girls hands (having previously sent
postal-card home for permission) and
say to her:
"Dear young woman, confide in me.
Allow me to collar your husband. Then
do you brace yourself against the side
of the car and kick him SO high that all
the dogs in America will have starved to
death before he comes down."
But didn't say any thing, But when
the party came back into the sleeper,
then there was a scene. The porter
looked at the dog uneasily, and said he
"allowed it was kind of onregular, totin
dogs into de parlor cars And what
ever misgivings he may have had on the
subject were speedily cleared by pas
senger-a testy old gentleman with a
back as broad as county atlas, and a
breath so short that he breathed three
times in speaking word of two sylla-
bles-an old gent with the. baldest head
that ever Knocked hair oil, "a head with n
fringe of upright, bristly hair all round
it. He stood in the aisle, as he heard
the dog mentioned, stepping out from
behind the curtains in the attire of a
y man who is not going into society, i'm
1nediately His bare feet spread out on
the floor, his suspenders dangled down
behind him, his fat face glowed with
rage, and he roared out to the porter
"Out with that dog. No dogs sleep
where / do. L amt used to it and |
won't have it. Trundle him OUT
"Hold on there" cried the confident
husband, "that dogs all right I've
got letters 4,
''Blast your letters!'' roared the old
party 'sThe whole United States Post
Office Department can't crowd dog in
on us. Tell you, young man, it aim
right; it amt decent, and, by gum, il
amt safe. Body of man in the bag
gage-car now, on this very train, that
was bit by lap-dog two weeks ago
while hewas asleep, and died just II days
afterward. Country's full of mad dogs
This was lie, about the dead man,
but it woke every body in the car, set
all the women to screaming, and arm
ed public sentiment against the dog.
sBut tell you the dog isn't mad
persisted the owner, "and he'll have to
stay in here. I have letters from the
Superintendent of the division I
sac g Blast the Superintendent! 10 roared
VI the asthmatic passenger, triumphantly
'sHe's got nothing to do with the sleep
ing-car. Take the dog into day-coacl
4, and shut him mp ina wood box. Throw
him overheard. | don't care what yor
3 do with him, but he can't stay hare
I" But, my dear sir, pleaded the young
man 'S'flsa - ''5.i@rt q a. - ~
"Don't want to hear nothingt' yellet
the fat passenger, 81 don't travel witt
! a menagerie. Nobody wants your dos
in here!' III % ST
"No! Nobody! Nobody wants hiim!'
cane in hearty, fearless chorus from The
other berths, the chorus carefully an(
modestly keeping itself out of sight, 81
as not to detract from the power of tn.
solo who was gasping out the most ter
rife denunciations of all dogs in genera
and especially this one particular dog.
''Buts my dog the young man
would plead. sii
''Devil take your dog, SIR the ole
passenger would gasp. ''What is your
dog or any mans dog to my comfort
| say shan't sleep with him in this car
He can't stay here" ia ro., ,,,,f,