Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1878-05-11
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

What holds all the snuf In the
world? No one nose.
Indolence is the rust Of the mind
and the inlet of every vice.
Never wait tor thing to turn up.
Go and turn II up yourself.
A ureseni Of n box Of good cigars is
sure to he f,lI"wed by n puff.
This IL a naughty, naughty world.
We feel sadly out of pace here.
A man named Canarey Is in Sing
Sing. An appropriate place for him.
Plain god bands with Tiny lock
cts attac,ed are tie latest engage
n,ent rings.
Edncation pays An annual income
for lite, without expense for insur-
ance. repairs, ar taxes.
Despite the change of water Grant
experiences in his travels his health
continues good. Probably this is
because he doesn't use water.
God holds mortgage against
every mans life, and II the interest
isn't paid voluntarily and fully
why. the whole thing goes to the
devil.
To make a monkey wrench, feed
him the first green apples.
Some people use glasses for the
eyes Others cannot get them above
the nose.
"Walk in love" Put comma
after in aud see how the sense will
be altered.
Why Is q bslky horse like the capt
tai ni 1u key2 Because he is e ~
TIA t-in-n pull.
n the comiag Eur near Congress
wants d. i-keepr, there are Fiiz-
hugh aud P"lk out Of d.
There are eighteen rul, 70 govern
the cnudn, fla man setrd l~hiud
u runawny horse Rule l'-jump.
Throdor" ard Henry should have
hal the Wit to IN H. Elizabeth speak
ut tnr irginning instead of the end
Il the lecture season.
An freshman who Lad n pup and
large d g, cut tw" holes IN the ken
mel, one zig one f,r the dog, and y
litlp one { e toe pup
II Ms. ri ton tells the truth now.
she he'd aud tod the truth before; it
she tells taisrhard now she told
the truth and lied before.
"Is this Alder creeka" inquired
tourist of an old man leaning over
fence. "Yas, dis is all der creek
know on" was the reply.
Grace Greenwood, We arc told, in
indorses Schurz. DR.. Mary Walker
indorses both Schurz and pantaloons
but she don't spell shirts that
way.
A distressed mother writes to a
newspaper for advice, and gets it,
thusly: The only way to cure your
son of staying out late o. nights, Is to
break his legs.
The question which now agftatcs
the American mind is whether the
Arab s'eed, whice the Saltan pre-
sented tn General Grant, is "a dabble
grey ar Turkish hey.
A Mississippi Judge was just say
ipg than M one but coward would
carry pistol, when his own fell from
chis pocket and was discharged, and
the bullet hit II lawyer in til" leg.
The other DIV, up in Minnesota, n
circus joke died M til" advanced aye
of one hundred years: This We he
lieve, is rather old for circus Ike,
very few Of which, even in this coun-
try, have attained u greater age than
ninety six years.
"The Life Guards are the tallest
soldiers in the world" boasted an
Englishman. "Whew!" remarked
Paddy; "you never saw the South
Tipperary Artillery Militia; they're
so high that when they look to the
ground it makes them dizzy"
A Young lady said pretty good
thing the other evening. She had
many admirers among the limbs Of
the law, and beng asked how she
escaped heart-whole, said she sup.
posed it WAS owing to the fact that
sin II multitude of counselors there is
safety"
II you pass through the hen-roost
with u careful eye, just now. YOU
will notice u sadness creeping over
the countensnces Of the old hens.
u is not simply the knowledge that
they must die, but the thought that
they muat be sold fnr snrinu chick.