Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1878-04-20
TWAIN L AGAIN.
Mnrh's speech at the banquet Given
Bnynrd Taylor Rt New York.

fore being unprepareu l Aul alltuI anu
pndone. However, l will say this much
for the speech had written out-that
it was a very good one, and gave 1t
away, as | had no further use for It and
saw that | could not deliver it. There
| will ask the indulgence OF the
company here to let me retire without
speaking. | will make my compliments
tn our honored friend, Mr.. Taylor, but
will make them on hoard ship, where l
shall be a fellow passenger.
Here follows the speech which Mr..
Clemens wrote out.
have been warned, as no doubt have
all among you hat are experienced That
a dinner to our ambassador is an oeca-
sion which demands, even requires, a
p~eculiar caution and delicacy in the
handling of the dangerous weapon OF
speech, have been warned to avoid
all mention of International politics, and
all criticism, however mild, OF countries
with which we are at peace, lest such ut
terances embsrrass Il minister and our
government in their dealings with
| foreign states. In a word, ! have been
cautioned to talk, but be careful not to
say anything. do not CONSIDER inns a
difficult task.
Now. it has often occurred to me that
the conditions under which we live at
the present day, with the revelations OF
geology all about us, viewing, upon the
one hand, the majestic CONGREGATIONS OF
the s%ilurian, o%oolitic, old red sandstone
periods, and, upon the other, the atiiia-
lions, and qualifications, and ramlhca'
tions of the prehistoric, W. are stricken
dumb with amazed surprise, and can
only lit our hands and say with that
wise but odious Frenchman: at was a
slip of the tongue, sir, and wholly I'M
intentional, entirely unintentional'" 1t
would ill become me, upon an occasion
like this, ~purposely to speak slightly OF a
citizen of a country with which we are
Mt pSace, and especially great and gra-
cious France, whom, God preserve! The
subject, however, is a delicate one, and
| will not pursue it.
> But-as | was about to r~emark--cast
your eye abroad, sir, for one pregnant
; moment over the vista which looms be-
= fore YOU in the mighty domain OF intel
lectual progression, and contemplate the
awe.compelling theory of the descent
# of man! Development, sir! Develop
ment! Natural selection, Correlation OF
the sexesI Spontaneous combustion =
d what gulls and whirlwinds of intellect.
ual stimulus these magic words fling
n upon the burning %canvassOf the material
is universe of the soul ! Across the chasm
of the ages we take the oyster by the
n hand and call him brother; and back
20 and still further back, we go, and breathe
1t the germ we cannot see, and know il
lie him our truer Adam Aud as we stand
as dazed. transfxed, exalted, and gaze down
the long procession of life, marking how
d steadily, how symmetrically we hayt
Y, assembled, step by step, to our sublime
estate and dignity of humanity-out o
is one lowly form into a little higher and
I'd little higher form--adding grace ate
g, grace, and function after function, wit
or each and every change-developing fror
e, tadpOles into frogs, frogs into fishes
i'll fishes into birds, birds into reptiles
oh reptiles into Russians beg a millio
lis pardous, sir and gentlemen-it was
ks wholly innocent slip Of the tongue, an
Y, due only to the excitement of debate
~ for, far be it from me, upon such a
'er occasion as this, to cast a seeming slu
of upon a great nation with whom We al
ess at peace-a great and noble and Chri
nd tian nation-whOm God expand.
nd But, as | wa about to remark, mai.
ed tain, and nothing can ever drive II
from that position, that the contrib
lis tions of the nineteenth century to SC
ye ence and industrial arts are-are-
but, of course they are. There is !
de need to dwell upon that. You look at
so yourself. Look at steam! Look at Il
steamboat, look at the railway, look
es, the steamship Look at the telegraI
If which enables you to fash your though
he from world TO world, ignoring interve
ew ing seas. Look at the telephone, viii
enables you to speak into affections
me mote ear the word that cheers, and in
OF the ear Of the foe the opinion which y
a ought not to risk at a shorter ram
an Look at the sewing machine, look at
3D. fog-horn, look at the bell punch, look
the the book agent. And, more than all
i've thousand times, look at the last a
n a greatest, the RrOphone, which will enal
nd Moody and Sankey to stand or the tall
summit of the Rocky mountains a
deliver their message to listening Am
lea and necessarily it will annul q
an do away with the pernicious custom
art, taking up a collection. Look at all tn
the things, sir, and say if it is not a
lde prOuder and more precious boon to hi
his been born in the nineteenth century u
in any century that went before it. j
ion sir, clothed with the ail>sufficient gra
and eur of citizenship in the nineteenth c
hen tury, ever the wild and arid New Jers
was man might-a mistake. sir, a mists
ate; and entirely unintentional. Of all
met kingdoms, principalities and count
the with which it is u privilege TO h
peaceful relations, | regard New Jel
as dearest to our admiration, nearest
our heart, the wisest and the pu
the among the nations. | retire the uni
lomatic language, and beg your sympa
and indulgence.
box, But, as | was about to remark, it
to. always seemed to me--that is, of cOu
since l reached a reasonable age--t
this much-agitated question of fut
the rewards and punishments we've
upon which honest and sincere diI
and ences of opinion might exist, one il
the Vidual, with more or less Justice, lear
now to the radical side of it, whilst anot
the individual, with apparently equal
am? tice, but with infinitely more conn
mer. sense, more intelligence, more iustif
ton, leans to a bitter and remorse
d. detestation of the pitileSs pr
I re- Of p%erditiOn-.a slip OF the tons
Y on | do sincerely assure you'll beg
ems to let me withdraw that unintentiC
the slur upon the character of that g
'ntal and excellent parsonage with whom
,era- whose country we are upon the clio
7 to and most intimate terms, and who
fec! no use, sir, l will sit down; | don't 81
suit, to have any knack at a diplom
g of speech; l have probably compromt
'aste the country enough for the present.
ID in Nonsense aside, ! am most since
lion. glad to assist at this public expressio
be. appreciation Of Mr.. TaylOr's charaC
ping scholarship and distinguished litel
:, or service. l am sure he is not merely
ID of Of the fttest men we had for the pl
- h,,t A. ENAonI - 80 .1s. -