The Canton advocate. [volume] (Canton, D.T. [S.D.]) 1877-1897, 1878-04-30
MISCELLANEOUS.

lAoHOy w UO "AOAOu'
Down in Amsterdam they are inaugur-
ating what they call hug parties; and
everybody embraces the opportunity
and the girls.-Syracuse Times.
IT wasn't until Brooklyn youth had
stabbed his girl that she found out that
she loved him. Young man, if you are
in love, here is an example for you.-
Phil. Chronicle Herald.
"EcoNoMY is the road to wealth."
and the way can be easily told by the
tall grass which streaks its CENTRE
Whitehall 7Smss.
SIMON CAMERON does not find the
Arkansas Hot Springs as warm for him
as the Widow Oliver made Washington.
M Y Star. 49, i,.as
SAYS Josh Billings: 81 notiss one
thing, the man who rides on the cars
every day is satisfied with one seat, but
the man who rides once q year wants at
least four"
The ward boundaries of Constantine
pie will have to be drawn in a little in
order to get the capital inside the limits
of the new map of Turkey.-Burlington
Hawkeyr. ut
OUR new silver dollar contains only
% cents worth of silver, but the man
who tries to get one for less than 100
cents is liable to be laughed at.-Bost0a
7Saceler. ~. '5}&
ONE side of the fraudulent dollar has
a fat British girl on with tremendous
bang. and on the other hen flying off
her ,nest-probably frightened BY the
bang. ~ Philadelphia Bulletin.
The editor of the Burlington Hu,ckeye
says the statement that he can marry his
cousin is totally false. he is married
his cousins are all married, and
his cousins are all men. Oh, very well;
he needn' do it. There are other men
in this world, we hope.-Befalo Erpress.
AN Illinois woman has written to one
of the assistant postmaster generals to
pick her out a good young man for a
husband. He at once replied thatit was
not his business to sort the males, and
she wasn't an Ohio woman, anyhow.
CoNuNDRUM by the man in the sew
enth story: 2" Why is a passenger ele-
vator like an unruly member of the
legislature?" Answer, with considerable
emotion, because it is always out Of
order"
LEO XIII. has three brothers. Carr,
so years old, bed-ridden and apoplectic.
Johann is the head Of the family; the
third is an ex-Jesuit and secular priest.
Besides, the pope has two married sisters
and nephew, who is a volunteer in the
Italian army.
~ DISGUSTING .FAMIIIARITY-Testy old
gent lat his club): Conf. "Why the
dickens don't you wipe the bottom Of the
glass before you bring it up? Just get a
cloth and wi Pc" Waggish waiter:
II didn't understand you to order dry
sherry, sir" General titter.) Old
gent rushes off and writes to the commit
tee.-Punch. !Hf
AN Illinois woman has written to one
of the assistant postmaster generals to
pick her outa good young man for hus-
band. He at once replied that it wa
not his business to sort the mails, and sh
wasn't an Ohio woman, anyhow.-Ihila.
Bulletin. His answer stamps" him as
a very impolite official. .-.-z,~~
LORD MACAULAy, in describing the
troubles of Great Britain in f.rmer years
with respect to currency, remarks: 1T
may we'll be doubted whether all the
misery inflicted on the English nation in
quarter Of a century by bad kings,
bad ministers, bag parliaments and bad
Judges was equal to the misery caused
in single year by bad crowns and bad
shillings."
A PRACTICAL English clergyman has
induced the Shakers residing near him to
alter one article of their creed. When
they called on him 70 bury one of their
number, he asked, I" Is she deadW and
on receiving the answer, ono; she is not
dead, she sleepeth," closed his book and
walked off, saying, ~ can't bury one
that isn't dead" They agreed to regard
her as dead. 49,.
BUBBIEs has had more trouble with
his photograph. There was sewing
society at his home the other day, and
the photograph kept up a lively CONVEX
sation that evening about the needs of
the heather, and the faults of the neigh
bors, until midnight. Then Bubbins
corked it up, and in less than fifteen
minutesi it exploded, and destroyed about
half the parlor furniture. There are
limits to the character of the phono-
graph. .s"%
The alpha, a lofty journal published
at Washington, devoted to great deal
of talk about things that it doesn't know
anything about, comes to us marked X,
and solemnly assures us in the leading
article that we can marry our cousin"
You're a liar, we can't, for three reasons.
In the first place we are already married;
and in the second place all our cousins
are married, and in the third place they
are all men.-Burlington Haaokeye.
In digging for the foundations Of the
new addition to the Olean house the
workmen came to a mass of partly de-
cayed logs laid with regularity at a depth
of about six feet from the present surface
of the ground. Pioneer authorities agree
in stating that this stratum Of logs
marks the location and once formed tn,
first hotel ever kept in Olean. 1t Was
built entirely of logs in the year 1908 by
Ebenezer Reed, and was kept by him for
many years. i..l..a ..-s
MR. JOSEPH BoNoMI, who died in
England the other day at the advanced
age of eighty-two was son OF Joseph
Bonomi, architect to St. Peters, Rome.
The son also was an architect. He trav-
eled extensively in the east, making
drawings of the notable buildings and
monuments in the Holy Land andlEgypt,
and his long practice at the drawing, OF
hieroglyhics, as we'll as Egyptian sculP'
ture, gave him facility in that style
which has never been excelled by any
other draughtsman.
The Augusta Journal tells this whale
,xo..x. g NTo;no ,ohoonor whi1n fish