Rocky Mountain husbandman. [volume] (Diamond City, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1878-01-31
THE HOM L CIR {.
rYeAaEMENrs, SECRET AND OPEN.

EYGAGEMENTs, SECRET AND OPEN.
The San Francisco E1an7iner, speaking
n od;torially on the above subject, after MOTTO
Il mo the custom of publishing engagements
az we'll as marriages and deaths, which has
u surung up in New York in recent years,
NJ says:
Not many years ago q weekly paper I'M
II dertook to print news of engagements in
n fashionable life, and in would-be fashionable
NJ lite. and it was severely assai'ed for SO doing.
The charge was that it was meddling with
4 the private matter of families, and inform
Il ing the public of things which did not con-
ID Germ them. 1nasmuch as it's reports OF EN-
n cacements were not official, but picked up
from cossips, there was reason for the fault
N found with the enterprlsing journal. Stories
n of the betrothel Of men and very of
ten get about when there is no real fOunda-
N ton for them, and sometimes mischief-mak-
II es will start them with malicious intent.
H But of late years it seems to be conmon
for people in what is called society to be-
come engaged, and keep the tact to them
ID selves. 1t is manifest to all who knew them
that they behave very much as it they were
4 engaged. but neither the man nor the wo-
\ man acknowledges that such is the case, and
and there is an air OF mystery about them
Il which is provoking and indefensible. The
4 secrecy OF the betrothel, too, is OF course apt
to render the promise of marriage less bind:
ing on the parties, to afford one or the other
I a loop-lole of escape; and perhaps in some
cases that is why it is maintained. They do
not care to publish their engagement, for at
ter all it may come to nothing. But in the
majority of these unacknowledged engage
ments the pair have probably no other object
than t" mystify their friends, or to escape
4 general recognition as a man and coma
pledged to marry each other.
The SWn thinks that these secret engage
ments are not credible to the parties. 1t a
man and a woman have mad up their minds
to get married, unless there is something
wrong about them they have no occasion to
be ashamed Of what they nave done, or to
be afraid to let the world know what their
Intentions are. Once their friends have rec
oghlzed their new relation, the engaged pair
are established on a frank and square foot
ing and the chances of tile engagement be-
Ing kept u%nbroken are tar better than when
I'll ~foolisily left unacEnowledged, to be the
suo)ect OF gossip and surmise. Everybody
KNOWS then exactly where TO place them.
anu TO just what responsibilities to hold
'aem. a man who is fond enough OF a wo-
man TO ask her to be his wife, ought to be
proud to have his friends know that she has
consented to take him. and she should re-
ioSe TO engage herself unless he IS willing
70 let the fact be understood. Getting ell
sagedl IS a pretty serious though very delight
lul business, and young people make a mis-
lake When they treat it lightly or try to ere
ave II silly mystery out Of it.
me ceremony of betrothel in Germany.
EAU the publication of the banns of matri-
inohy elsewhere, are very desirable things,
y 1ley surround the institution Of marriage
NNh valuable solemnities and safeguards.
Engagements thus become matters OF great
IMPORTANCE, and cannot so readily be broken
% t'ey now are with us. There are girls in
oah francisco. New York and other cities,
u look on a proposal AS something in the
"u'nary course, and acceptance as a mere