The Lamoille news. (Hyde Park, Vt.) 1877-1881, 1878-04-17
A Sensational nnnker.

we tAAe the ioilowlng ludicrous eX-
tract from Bret Harte's sketch, entitled
Jimmy"
1t was the beginning Of a warm night,
and the middle OF heated political dis
cussion. Sawyer's Bar had gathered in
force at the Crossing, and by the light
Of haring pine torches, cheered and
applauded the rival speakers who, from
a rude platform, addressed the excited
multitude. Partisan spirit at that time
ran high in the Foot Hills elimination
and re-crimination, challenge, reply,
accusation, and retort had already in.
famed the meeting, and Colonel Bung-
starter, after withering review of his
opponents policy, eliminated with
personal attack upon the career and
private character of the eloquent and
chivalrOus Colonel Culpepper Stsrbottle,
OF SiskiyOu. That eloquent and chival-
rous gentleman was known TO be
present; it was rumored that the attack
was expected to provoke a challenge
from Colonel Starbottle, which would
give Bungstarter the choice OF weapons,
and deprive Starbottle of his advantage
as dead shot. 1t was whispered also
that the sagacious Starbottle, aware of
this fact, would retaliate in kind so out
rageously as to leave Bungstarter no
recourse but to demand satisfaction on
the spot. As Colonel Starbottle rose,
the eager crowd drew together, elbow
ing each other in rapt and ecstatic ex-
pectancy. All ears were alert, particu-
larly the very long and hairy ones just
rising above the railing of the speakers
platform for jimmy, having feminine
distrust of solitude and fondness for
shadow, followed her master to the
meeting, and had insinuated herself
upon the platform, where way was made
for her with that frontier courtesy al
ways extended to her age and sex.
Col. Starbottle, stertorous and purple,
advanced to the railing. There he un-
buttoned his collar and laid his neck
cloth aside; then, with his eye fixed on
his antagonist, he drew off his blue
frock-coat, and, thrusting one hand into
his ruffied shirt front, and raising the
other to the dark canopy above him, he
opened his vindictive lips. The action,
the attitude, were Starbottle's but the
voice was not. For, at the supreme
moment, a bray-so profound, so appal-
ling, so utterly soul subduing, 80 para
Lying, that everything else sank to mere
|insignifcance beside TITLED woods,
and sky, and air. For q moment only
the multitude gasped in speechless
astonishment-it was q moment only
and then the welkin roared with shouts.
In vain silence was commanded; in vain
Col. Starbottle, with a ghastly smile,
remarked that he recognized in the
interruption the intellect OF the opposi-
tion; the laugh continued, the more as
it WAS discovered that jimmy had not yet
finished, and was still recurring to her
original theme. Gentlemen" gasped
Starbottle, "any attempt by (hee-haw |
from jimmy brutal buffoonery to restrict
the right of free speech to all "a pro
longed assent from jimmy is worthy only
the dastardly but here a dim;nuendo,
80 long drawn as to appear striking
imitation of the Colonel's own apoplec-
tic sentences, drowned his voice with
shrieks of laughter.
1t must not be supposed that, during
this performance, vigorous attempt
was not made to oust jimmy from the
platform. But all in vain. Equally
demoralizing in either extremity, jimmy
speedily cleared circle with her flying
hoofs, smashed the speakers table and
water pitcher, sent the railing flying in
fragments over the cheering crowd, and
only succumbed to two blankets, in
which, with her head concealed, she was
finally dragged, half captive, half victor,
from the field. Even then a mufled
and supplemental bray that came from
the woods at intervals drew half the
crowd away, and reduced the other half
to mere perfunctory hearers. The de-
moralized meeting adjourned Col.
Starbottle's whitening reply remained
unuttered, and the Bungstarter party
remained triumphant.