The Osceola times., 1878-04-20
TWAIN TALKS AGAIN.
MARKS speech at the Banquet Given
Bayard Tay I0r nj New York.

MARKS speech at the Banquet Given
Bsyard Ta, Ior at New York.
Mr.. Chairman: ] had intended To
make an address of some length here
tonight, and in fact wrote out an i'm.
promptu speech laughter i, but have
had no time to memoriz, it. ! cannot
make a speech on the moment, and there.
fore being unprepared | am silent and
undoue. However, l will say this much
for the speech | had written out-that
it was very good one, and | gave it
away, as had no further use for 1t and
saw that / could not deliver it. There.
fore | will ask the indulgence Of the
company here to let me retire without
speaking. | will make my compliments
to our honored friend, Mr.. Taylor, but l
will make them on toard ship, where l
shall be fellow passenger.
Here follows the speech which Mr..
Clemeus wrote out.
have been warned, as no doubt have
all among you that are experienced, that
a dinner to our ambassador Is an occa.
sion which demands. even requires. a
peculiar caution and delicacy in the
handling of the dangerous weapon of
speech. / have been warned to avoid
all mention of international politics, and
all criticism, however mild, of countries 6
with which We are at peace, lest such ut
terances embarrass our minister and our
government in their dealings with
foreign states. In word, ! have been
cautioned to talk, but be careful not tc
say anything. ] do not consider this q
di1cult task.
Now, it has often occurred to me that
the conditions under which we live al
the present day, with the revelations Of
geology all about US, viewing, upon the
one hand, the majestic confgurations Of
the silurisn, ooolitic, old red sandstone
periods, and, upon the other, the sfiiIia-
tions, and qualifications, and ramiica.
tions of the prehistoric, we are stricken
dumb with amazed surprise, and can
emily lit our hands and say with that
wise but odious FreDchman; at was a
slip Of the ton yue, sir, and wholly un-
Intentional, entirely unintentiOnal." 1t
would i'll become me, upon an occasion
like this, purposely to speak slightly of a
citizen Of a country with which we are
at peace, and especially great and gra.
cious France, whom, God preserve The
subject, however, is delicate one, and
| will not pursue it.
But-as | was about to remsrk-cast
your eye abroad, sir, for one pregnant
moment over the vista which looms be-
fore you in the mighty domain of intel.
lectual progression, and contemplate the
awe.compellipg theory of the descent
OF man Development, sir! Develop.
ment Natural selection ! Correlation OF
the sexes Spontaneous combustion l.
what gulis and whirlwinds of intellect.
ual stimulus these magic words fling
upon the burning canvass of the material
universe Of the soul Across the chssm
OF the ages we take the oyster by the
hand and call him brother; and back,
and still further back, we go, and breathe
the germ we cannot see, and knew in
him our truer Adam! Aud as we stand,
daxed. .ransfixed, exalted, and gaze down
the long procession of life, marking how
steadily, how symmetrically we have
ascended, step by step, to our sublime
estate and dignity of humsnity-out oi
one lowly form into little higher and a
little higher FORM adding grace after
grace, and function after function, with
each and every change-developing from
tadpoles into frogs, frogs into fishes,
fishes into birds, birds into reptiles,
reptiles into Russians-I beg a million
pardous, sir snd gentlemen-it was a
whelly innocent slip of the tongue, and
due only to the excitement of debate--
.or, far be ii from me, upon such an
occasion as this, to cast seeming slur
upon a great nation with whom we are
at peace-a great and noble and Chris.
tian nstion-whom God expand.
But, as I was about to remark, i main.
tain, and nothing can ever drive me
from that position, that the contribu.
tions of the nineteenth century to sci.
ence and industrial arts are-are--
but, OF course they are. There is no
need to dwell upon that. You look at il
yourself. Look at steaml Look at the
steamboat, look at the railway, look al
the steamrhip! Look at the telegraph
which enables you to flash your thoughts
from world to world, ignoring interven
ing ~as. Look at the telephone, which
enables you to speak into Affections 70
mote ear the word that cheers, and into
the ear Of the foe the opinion which you
ought not TO risk at shorter range
Look at the sewing machine, look at thu
fog-horn, look at the bell punch, look a,
the book agent. And, more than all q
thousand times, look at the last anc
greatest, the arophone, which will enable
Meody and Sankey to stand on the tales
summit Of the Rocky mountains ant
deliver their message to listening Amer
lea and necessarily 1t will annul ant
do away with the pernicious custom o
taking up collection. Look At all thes'
things, sir and say II 1t is not fal
prouder and moro precious boon 10 hav'
l. L. Al