The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1878-02-27
DADS Distant relations


A farmers wagon, in which were
seated a family Of eight, recently
drove up to a house on Beaubin sttseti
and, leaving his team at the curb
stone, the farmer knockedat thedoor,
drummed on the windows, andseem.
ed determined to get in ateyery haz-
ard. When all efforts had failed he
returned tohis wagon, hitched his
horses, and tie family sat on the
grass to wait.
A lad who had watched the per-
formance passed around the corner
and suddenly discovered the boy
whose parents lived in the house.
Here-you-there's whole family
trying to get into your house! he
shouted.
Hush-shut up,whispercdtho cthi
er.
But they are visitors, continued
the other.
Don't l know all about it, growfed
the hiding boy, did not nam and 1.
soc them drive up, and didn't We
scoot out of the back door as the fell
low came through the gate? ] am
here and nam is over in that housei
and we feel like some one ought to
boot dad'al over town.
Why, what. did yohfiatheraos
What did hs-doS, Why he eMaso,at
in the country buying poultry and
eggs, and he stopped at farmhouse;
made them believe he was distant
relashun, and got his dinner for moth
ing. He came home and told it as q
big joke and he grinned around for
a week; but now | want to see him
when he comes up to dinner and finds
them relashuns squatted around the
gate2-Do they show any sign ofleav-
ing2
Nary a sign, replied the ether, as
he climbed the fence.
Well, let them stick. Nam won't
come home, will be gone, and if
this turns out Black Friday for dad
it will serve him right. Let's get
where we can see his knees wobble
as he turns the corner and sees his
distant relashuns covering half an
acre of ground2
The old maxum, "Be chaste and.
you will be happy" is contradicted
point blank by a Black Hill man,
who was recently chased ten miles
by party of Redskins.
1t was a gusty, dusty day. How
horribly disagreeable,' she exclaimed
this awful dust is positively terrible:
1t fills ones eyes, ears, nose and
MOUTH yes said he, 1T is rather
unpleasant for those who cannot keep
their mouths shut"
While Tripod and his wife were
sitting in the theatre last night, he
nudged her in the ribs and said,
"There comes tho reindeer when
she, with a troubled look on her face,
glanced at her lavendcr-colOred silk
dress, andexclaimed, "And you didn't
bring an umbrellal"
A Scottish divine happened to
meet two of his parishioncrs at the
house Of u lawyer whom he consider
too sharp practitioner. The lawyer
jocularly and ungracousily put the
question, doctor, these are members
of your flock; may l ask do you look
on them as white or black sheep2"-
"I don't know" answered the divinci
dryly, "whether they are black or
white sheep; but | know If they are
here long they are pretty sure to be
well AcoCcd.o
The greatest man is he who chooses
right with the most invincibte reso.
luton; Who resists Che sorest temp.
tations FROM within and without
who bears theheaviest burdens cheer.
fully; who is calmest in storms and
most fearless under menaces and
rroyns; whose reliance on truth, on
virtue and on God is most unfalteringi
"Ah, parson / wish could carry
RAD ,ol,I with mn y tnid a d,,inot MN ~