Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1878-08-30
FIAT MONEY,
Permanent Financial Relief at the Cross t
Roads Nasty Turns "Financier" and
Gets Up "Skeem."
Toledo Blade.
CONFEDRIT X ROADS.
(Which is in the State of kentucky, :
InnIN % 1879 l

Yesterday | wuz perplexed l he'd
bin argooin with my yoosal ability in
favor ov an Unlimited ishoo NV greenbax
with view NV maxim money eesier, and
givin every man wich wanted it all he
wantid, when Issaker Gavitt staggered
me, askin we wat good that wuz goin to
do him?
:" Yoo promised us" said Issaker,
money in plenty when you got the sill
yer bill passed, but | never got hold NV
a dollar NV it, onless | earned it, and
that | Good do before silver wuz made
legal tender There's money enuff for
them now eZ is so degraded ez to work
for it, but that amt wat fnanseerin is
for. Wat | want is money that | don't
work for-money furnished by pater-
nal government, as it were, money that
comes NV itself, 700 see. Don't talk to
me ontil 700 kin come in that shape"
| laid awake a whole mite ponderin the
subjeck. | saw to-wunst the force NV
lssaker's objeckshun, and | felt that
suthin must be done to solve this prob
lim
At precisely 3 o'clock in the mornin
| hit it. 1t come to me as revelashen,
and | went to sleep, satisfied that l he'd
solved the problem NV finance.
This is my ldee. Money wuz plenty
doorin the late onpleasantness becoz the
government wuz a borryin Nv every
body 1t wuz plentyer in the Confed-
eracy than it wuz in the federal states
becoz the Confederacy wuz the biggest
borryer. The northern farmer wich he'd
a hoss that afore the war. OWN to its
bein spawned, was wuth $50, found that
hoss wuth $500 doorin the war becoz the
government he'd to hev it, and he'd moth
in but its greenbax to pay for it in.
Hence the honest farmer divvyed with
the honest contractor, and there wuz
$500 put afoat, wich was good thing
for the groceries and the photoffraffers
The wife NV that farmer never stopped
till she he'd cake NV French toilet soap
and silk dress and her PHOTOGRAPH, and
the farmer himself put on broadcloth
and fine linen, and bot trottin sulky
Them wuz prOsperus days.
We cant, NV course, hev another war
to Git our new ishoo into serkelashen,
but we kin hev wat will do jist ez we'll
We kin hev internal improvements. We
kin complete all the kanals and railroads
that ever wiz commenst and we kin
commense jist ez menny more eZ we
choose. For instance, the Cross Rodes
wants:
The slack watrin Nv Niger Run to
make it availeable for side-wheel steem-
ers at all seanons Nv the yeer.
The compleshn Nv the Secessionville
raleroad, to lower the frate on likker
from Louisville
The compleshn NV the pike to Bore
gard to cut off the trade to Liberty
vile.
The establishment NV an arsenal at
the Corners, and also nashnel military
academy.
The immedjit bildin Nv branch con-
nectin the Corners with the Southern
Pacific road
The establishment here Nv nashnel
observatory, to observe eclipses and dis
kiver planets and sich, without wich
ther can't be prosperity.
The bildin NV plank road over Davis
Hill, with swing bridge over Niger
Run.
These improvements all demanded by
the general good, will cost not less than
three millions NV dollars, all NV wich
wood be divided among the honest per-
doosers NV the Corners and the honest
contractors, NV wich | shood be one.
Thus the money would git into circu-
lation. and thus it wood go long way
toward restoring prosperity. Ez every
other locality in the country wood want
a ekal amount, there Good be at least a
thousand millions put afoat to begin
with, wich Good be added to from time
to time, ez we needed it.
But it wood all hev to be paid
again?" objected Bascom, wich hevin
nuthin is alluz objectin to- tinashel
skeems for betterin the times
Never" sed |, never. This money
amt never to be redeemed. 1t will go
on and on forever. When bill gifts old,
700 kin go and exchange it for new
one, and that for another new one. The
people will be obleegcd to take it for it
will be legal tender, and it cant help
making money plenty, wich is wat we
waut, now. Pay! never! Eff we are a
goin to pay we mite be benefited for a
time, but it would be but temprary.
We want permanent finanshel relief,
suthin that will last. A unlimited ishoo
of money and liberal system NV inter
nal Improvements to git it into cirke
lashcn is what we want now
Issaker was satisfied, and tomorrow
mite we meet to organize the "Onlimitid
Ishoo and Internal Improvement League
NV the Cross Roads
Our rallying cry will be, Our capas-
sity for spending money must be excl
to our capassity for perdoosin it, and
both must be Unlimited" We shell hev
good times at the Corners ez soon ez
the Nationals carry congress, and kin
git to work | hev developed the skeem
for EN-. PETROLEUM Y. Massey.