davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

Shoddy carriages are, it is plain, much
more dangerous to those who use them than
shoddy pianos, if the Carriage Monthly is
Of the former is as common as of the latter.
According to the paper named, "the cross
grain, knotted, gnarled, checked hubs,
spokcs, and rims that are fit for nothing but
fuel are thrown together by the cheapest
process and poorest labor, and sold to the
shoddy builder for mere trifle in advance
of the bare expenses of making the worth
less stock. The gearings are made by the
wholesale on the same principle, while the
marked price of n dozen pairs of shafts
would hardly be equal to that asked for
one good, serviceable pair The bodies are
the products oftoil ground down to success
fully compete with pauper labor. Nails
are used in place of screws, while glue and
canvas are found to be unnecessary. The
iron is the poorest malleablc, and those
parts that are forged are coarse and poorly
made.
The subject is of grave interest not only
to carriage manufacturers and owners, but
to the general public, for wrecked vehicle
is likely to endanger more lives than that
of the party riding in it. The wonderful
cheapness OF some kinds of carriages, and
the frequency of breakdowns and conse-
quent runaways, indicate that carriages
made nowadays are not all patterned in
solidity and durability of construction af-
ter the old deacon's one-horse shay.-N. Y.
San.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05
An ObtuSe Man.

She was stylish young lady about eigh-
| teen years old, and to accommodate Il friend
she took the baby out for an airing. She
was wheeling it up and down the walk
when an oldish man, very deaf, came along
and inquired for certain person supposed
to live on that street. She nearly yelled
her head off trying to answer him, and he
looked around, caught sight of the baby
and said
Mice child that, I suppose you feel proud
of him ?"
at isn't mine," she yelled at him.
boy, ELI Well, he looks just like you"
ut isn't mine" she yelled again, but he
nodded his head and continued
Twins ell where's the other one"
She started off with the cab, but he fol-
lowed and asked
did it die of collie ?"
Despairing of making him understand
by words of mouth, she pointed to the
baby, at herself, and then shook her head
"1es-yes, see, tother twin in the house.
Their father is fond of them, of course %
She turned the cab and hurried the other
way, but he followed and then asked:
$40 they kick around much of nights 2"
81 tell you faint minc," che shouted,
looking very red in the face
81 think you're wrong there" he answer
ed. "Children brought up on the bottle are
apt to pine and die"
She started on run for the gate, but
before she had opened it he came up and
asked:
"Have to spank 'em once and awhile /
suppose ?"
She made about twenty gestures in half
minute, and he helped the cab through
the gate, and said:
sour children were all twins, and III
send my wife down to give you some advice
You see"
But she picked up nower-pot and flung
it at him. He jumped back, and as she en-
tered the house he called out:
"llope insanity won't break out on the
twins ~
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

"A cruel halEdrunken teamster in
France not long since, angered at the poor
exertions made by one Of the horses-a
poor hack which had almost served its
time-decided that the animal was no lon
ger worth his feed, and resolved to put an
end to it. For that purpose he tied the
poor brute to tree, and taking a massive
lever used in moving goods, he struck the
animal several violent blows on the head
until the unfortunate brute sank to the
ground insensible. The master, thinking
the animal was dead, lett it on the spot,
intending to remove the body next day
The horse, regained its senses short time
after, found its way home, and entered the
court yard at daybreak. Its arrival was
welcomed by the neighing of its compan.
ions in the stable which noise awakened
the master, who was now furious at having
failed in his cruel purpose. He tied up the
animal airesb, and commenced showering
blows again upon its head. The act OF
brutality was committed in sight of two
other horses in the stable, and presently
one of them, a young animal, became so
frantic with rage, that he broke his halter,
and, rushing on the man, seized him in his
jaws, and after shaking him violently
threw him down and trampled ON him
with such fury, that, had not the mans
cries brought some person to his aid, the
master would certainly have been killed.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

Nor A WAsHwoMAN.-A sign on house
on Croghan street informs the public that
washing is done there, and it was quite
natural that a mechanic working near by
should take a bundle under his arm and
call there and ask of the boy on the step
Club is the washwoman in 2"
"No sir,n was the prompt reply -"therc's
no washwoman here at all )"
"But that sign says washing done here"
remarked the man.
"Spose it does ~ remarked the boy in a
higher key--"spose it does 2" A lady may
become the victim of unfortunate circum-
stances to such an extent that she is will.
ing to wash and iron shirts and sheets,
but that doesn't make IL wushwoman of
her, does it ?"
II thought it did," said the man.
"Humph If you draw u buggy down to
the shop to be repaired, does that make a
horse of you ~
The man was silently turning away when
the boy added
"If you want to find the lady of unfortu-
nate circumstances, go around to the side
door, but the washwoman isn't at home p
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05
Domestic Life in Turkey.

First among Turkish social topics is that
of the harcm. The Koran allows a Mussul-
man to have four wives; and many persons
have consequently imagined that polygamy
is the rule in Turkey, whereas it is the ex-
ccption. A Mussulman may only have, as
many wives as he can keep in comfort and
it is only the very rich who can afford to
keep four The middle class Turks have
only one wife apiece, the men of the lowest
class are often obliged to remain single from
not having the means to support q consort
in the style which the Moslem law enioins.
Nothing can be more un-Turkish than the
Mormon idea Of accommodating u number of
women to live under one roof quarreling in
the kitchen and paror, and acting as house
hold drudges for their husbands The
Turkish wife is not slave; the chief fault
to find with her is that she has too lofty a
sense of her own dignity. An advocate of
female rights would have some difficulty in
persuading her that her lot was pitiable;
she has never enyied the emancipation of
Christian women, whose free ways shock
her; while she has noticed that they get
much less respect from the men of their
faith than that which is invariably vouch-
safed to herself. She wells her face with no
more regret than Western lady unveils
her shoulders. Turkish women are not
shut up. They go out when they please
attended by their odaliks, if rich, or hold.
ing their children by the hand, and theil
magpie voices fill the bazaars. for they are
noisy takers. Wherever they pass, pen OF
all creeds stand aside deierentially. If a
husband meets his wife in the street he
makes no sign of recognition.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05
Bishop Clark, of Rhode Island, Away.

Bishop Clark, of Rhode Island, always
will have his joke, and it's always worth
having, too. Once upon a time his brother
was visiting him, and the good bishop
showed him to his bedroom in due course
of time. "Good night +; I'll put my boots
outside the door," said his brother. GAIL
right, SAM" replied the bishop, nobody
will touch 'em." BY the way, that same
brother of Bishop Clark was one of the
wittiest men alive. 1t runs in the family.
He once went TO see one ofhis parishioners,
IA lady with prodigious family, which
has recently been increased. AS he rose to
leave the lady stopped him with "But you
haven't seen my last baby" mo" he
quickly replied, "and l never expect to I"
| Then he fled.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05
VARIETIES.

"A man in Maine applied for five gallons
OF rum for mechanical purposes" "Fol
what mechanical purpose 2" "For raising
barn." was the reply.
Old Deacon Dobson always boosted
that he was prepared for the worst" ant
his neighbors thought he got it when hi
married his second wife.
Somebody tried to excuse liar to DR.
johnson, saying: "You must not believe
more that half what he says" "Aye," re-
piled the doctor, "but which half"
Why wouldn't Oleomargarine do for 6
girls name p Cincinnati Enquirer.1 i
we had little girl and hadn't any but her
we would call her that.-Richm0nG L,aCle-
pendent.
paper, sir2" asked the newsboy.-
mo, never read" was the blunt answ er
eli, boys, conc here" called out the gam.
in; there's man as is practisin' for the
juryW
"A Wisconsin editor illustrated the pre-.
vailing extravaganza of people nowadays
by calling attention to the costly baby car
riages in use, while when he was baby
they hauled him by the hair ofhs head.
"What want" said young beau, sis
q wife without falling" Then you'n
never marry" said his sister, "because
should you find such woman, she'll be
sure to want husband of the same char.
acter."
--"That's our jeremiah" said MI Shell
don. "He went off to make his own liv-
ing by his wits" "Well, did he succeed9"
inquired q friend. mo" said the old man
with sigh, and significantly tapping his
head, che failed Tor want of capital"
allow had you the audacity, John"
said Scottish laird to his servant, "to 90
and tell some people that was mean fell
low and no gentleman ?''-"Na, ma, sir"
was the candid answer you'll no. catch
me at the like o. that; keep my thoughts
to myself"
Two boys started from Rochelle, ILL.,, in
quest of adventure. They walked along a
railroad for ten miles, and then, very tired,
they sat down to rest. Very soon they fell
asleep, and one lay with his head across u
rail, so that when a train came along he
was beheaded.
The telescope owes its discovery to an
accident. Two little boys, sons of spec
tacle maker in Holland, while their father
was at dinner Glanced to look at distant
steeple through two eyeglasses, placed one
before the other. They found the steeple
brought much nearer the shop windows. =
They told their father the circumstance and
it led to a course of experiments which
ended in the telescope.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

ANOTHER KENTUCKY WoNDER.--A
Glasgow, KY, dispatch of June 20 says
Another wonderful cave has been discover
ed near this town. 1t has already been
explored distance of % miles. In anoth
er direction called the short route, the ave
nues are very wide, and span of horses
can easily be driven through distance OF
eleven miles. Three rivers, wide and very
deep, arc encountered on the long route
One Of them is navigable for fourteen
miles, until the passage becomes too mar
row to admit boat. This forms the
third, or river route, which has to be eX-
plored in boat. The cave is wonderful
beyond description, and far surpasses in
grandeur the Mammoth or any cave before
discovered Several mummified remains
have been found in one Of the large rooms
They were reposing in stone collins, rudely
constructed, and from appearances may
have been in this cave for centuries. They
present every appearance of the Egyptian
mummy.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05
A Man of Iron.
THE JOINTS OF HIS BODY HAVE ALL GROWN
SOLID.

THE JOINTS OF HIS BODY HAVE ALL GROWN
SOLID.
Jonathan r. Bass, of Cambria, Niagara
county, has not joint in his body. lie
went to bed in 1867 and has never been out
of it since. He cannot move even a finger.
lie ran as captain Of canal boat between
Buffalo and Rochester in 1850 and was
getting stiff then. When he could not do
any work he had to quit canalling, and
then went to book keeping. His joints
kept getting sitter and sitter. The doctor
could do him no good, and at last he had
to give up, and, after twenty-one years, he
has been abed at the farm homestead of his
family between Lockport and Lewistown.
His trouble commenced with pain shoot
ing through the bottom of his right foot
that tumbled him to the ground. The foot
commenced to swell and got to be almost
twice its natural size. Stiffness in the
joints followed. Now Bass is literally a
bone man. There is 70 more bend to his
legs, arms and body than there is to mar
bic statue. His arms are as fast to his sides
as if they were nailed there. For eight
years after he went to bed he could move
his arms, but the joints finally became solid
bone. They have to feed him with a spoon.
His jaws are as immovable as his other
joints. There is u space between his teeth
that is Just wide enough to get food
through. In 1869 he became blind. His
mind is sound, but he speaks with difficult
ty.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

The London school board has resolved
to teach girls how to cook. One of the
teachers is to give lessons in every board
school on food and its preparation, and the
girls will be required to attend. Twenty
one kitchens are to be opened in London,
and each is to be conducted by practical
cook, with salary of$S0O year.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

Last spring Mr.. w. Cambray Of Cana
da, caught young crow before it could
fly, and brought it home, where it soon be-
came tame. 1t struck up warm friend
ship with young hound belonging TO Mr..
Cambray. The crow was always around
with the hound shared his meals, and slept
in his box ut night on the bottom, not
seeking perch unless they were disturbed
during the night, when he would come out
and fly up into one ofthe trees near by, and
remain there till morning, When given
food, it invariably took "A portion to the
hound. 1t did not give it to him at once,
but would fly around above his head with
a piece of meat or crust of bread in his
bill, and keep teasing him with it, and
then would finally let him have his share.
But instinct began to be too powerful, and
he concluded that he must go to other
quarters for the winter, and it was amusing
to see how he tried to coax the hound away
with him. He would fly away little piece
and then alight and cav to the dog then
he would fly back, and seemed in great dis
tress because he could not induce his four
footed friend to go to warmer quarters for
the winter; but finding he would not leave,
he at length flew off.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

THE CATTLE GRUB.--It frequently hap
pens during the month of June that the
backs of cattle are injured by the grubs of
fly working their way out. These should
be taken out and destroyed as soon as dis
covered, as each female grub destroyed
may prevent several hundred next year A
good way to take them out is to take n
small oil can, such as used for sewing
machine, and drop little oil around the
grub. Then press hard upon each side of
the grub and ii will come out with pop.
The wound should then be covered with a
mixture of tar and grease to prevent flies
depositing maggots.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

In Texas camels are raised as easily as
horses and cattle. The colts for the first
three or four days arc rather tender, and
require close attention, but afterward they
are hardy enough. They feed on cactus
and brush, refusing all grasses. The te-
males, with proper care, give colt every
year.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

The cold is becoming so severe in Ice
land, increasing year by year, that grain
will no longer ripen there, and in consc-
quence the inhabitants are beginning in
earnest to seek new home on this CONT
nent.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

1t is often observed that short legged
firm compact horses do their work better
and last longer than large ones, particular
ly if they have clean, flat bone and plen-
ty of muscle. Cart horses of great weight
and height generally have round bones.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

THE INFLUENCE OF PLANT.-Thc
Scientific Farmer ays:-A little plant was
given to sick girl. I'm trying to take care
of it the family made changes in their way
of living. First they cleaned the window
that more light might come to its leaves
then, when not too cold, they would open
the window, that fresh air might help the
plant to grow. Next, the clean window
made the rest of the room look SO untdy
that they used to wash the floors and walls,
and arrange the furniture more neatly. This
led the father of the family to mend bro
ken chair or two, which kept him home
several evenings. After the work was done
he stayed at home, instead Of spending his
leisure hours at Il tavern, and the money
thus saved went to buy comforts for them
all. And then, as the home grew attract
i've, the whole family loved it better than
ever before, and grew happier and health.
Ter with the flowers. Thus the little plant
brought moral rs well as u physical les
son.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

Corn cobs are said to be an excellent
absorbent to place behind cattlein stables
the cobs soak up great deal ofliquid and
soon decay in the manure heap, adding
their own substance to increase its iertiliz-
ing value.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1878-07-05

-"Free chops" is sign hung out by II
Chicago restaurant, and when the custom
ers apply they are shown to wood-pile
and handed an axe.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
They Don't Get Any.

The awful truth is breaking up
on the mind Of the impecunious
silver shrieker that it is one thing
to remonetize bis parents dollar,
and another thing to get it into his
pocket.-N. Y. Tribune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
THE WONDERFUL VI
Y INE
l"PdSsiJl0ra Cerulea ~
I(LrfefiH Hl.lLri Gcl,n.. LlI.......A 4 -.

III ('I'dSsDtOrd Ceruled,"l
lchrtstS CruciGctiOH FiOi0er,l mailed 10 any
address for so cents, post paid
Plants from all Climes in hundreds OF varieties
Hanging Baskets and Choioe Grown Plants. our
specialties al prices lower than ever offered in
this country before.
WANTED;-A persons who love flowers and
plants to send for John Dreibelbiss, Jrs. New H.
Illustrated Catalogue of Choice New and Rare
Plants. Sent free 20 all who will favor us with
JOHN DREIBELBIss, Jr..
o3oWS Florist and Scotsman,
Fort Wavne Ind
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
Reliable Evidence.

Mr.. II. X. STEvESs.
Dear Sir IL will most cheerful
ly add my testimony to the great
number you have already received
in favor of your great ana good
medicine, Vegetine, for L do not
think enough can be said in its
praise tor / was troubled over
thirty years with that dreadful
disease, Catarrh, and had such
bad coughing spells that il would
seem as though i never could
breathe any more, and Ncgetine
has cured me and / do feel 10
thank God all the time that there
Is so good u medicine as Ncgctine,
and ] also think il Que of the best
medicines for coughs, and weak,
sinking feelings at the stomach,
and advise everybody to take the
Ncgetine, for can assure them it
is one OF the best medicines that
ever was.
Mrs. l.. GORE,
Cor. Magazine and Walnut Sts.,
Cambridge, Mass.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
George and Martha Washington,
Lincoln, Douglass, General sherman

nTt0' Hts II I1tt, stOnewaII .Jnc n som.
for hiteen cents we will send by mail postpaid
oeautlful OIL portrait of either of the above EN-.
iheht men pair for 25 cents, OF the set of eight
lor 20 cents These are not inferior daubs Lut
reaily me portraits, pronounced by good Judges
10 De perfect hkenesses. Liberal inducements TO
agents. Price list free. All the popular chromos
ana frames at the very bottom prices. A special
assortment OF 2ix3O chromos on stretchers AZ SO
cents each. BAYRD & GOLDSTEIN, Cleye-
land, Ohio. ' WV
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27

The Adrian Times prints the
following as a genuine "excuse"
brought to a teacher in that neigh
borhood :-"Miss = please Ex-
cuse minnie for She was helping me
She is a CRATE help to me thou
Small she would be l would miss
hur il the lord should Call hur at
any time and oblige Mrs. B"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27

A granger stood curiously watch
ing the peanut man as he methodi-
cally turned the crank of his roast
er. After expectantly waiting un-
til patience ceased to be a virtue,
the unsophisticated tiller of the
soil blurted out: "Hullol you
feller, why don't you play suthin'r
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27

Would you train up a child in
the way he should go, go that way
once in a while yourself.-Josh
Billings.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27

n . . o.is not easily earned in these times.
" 4 4 but IL can be made in three months
M by any one of either SEX in any
eD4 4 part of the country, who is willing
n TO work steadily at the employment
we furnish. s66 per week in your
own Town. You need not be away from home
over night. You can give your whole time TO the
work, or only your spare moments. We have
agehts VINO are making over $50 per day. All
VINO engage at once can make money fast, At
the present time money cannot be made 40 easily
ana rapidly at any other business. IL costs MOTH
ing 70 try the business Terms and as outfit Free
Me ~ sI,,Is'
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
ADVERTISING RATES.

line. S
Local Notices, ten cents per line each insertion,
ana all notices continued for three months or
longer, discount Of 20 per cent
Advertisements unnoeonpanied NV vrritten ox
verbal directions will be published three month
Advertisements, under contract, ordered out be :
iore expiration OF tme' will be charged full rates.
No paper discontinued until all arreara0es ars
paid except at the option of the publisher
Transient advertisements must be paid in ad-
vance. 49,
g51- Terms, CASH, payable quarterly.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
Errors of Youth. .

A GENTLEMAN who suffered for wears from
"A Nervous Debility Premature Decay, and all
the effects OF youthful indiscretion, will for the
sake OF suffering humanity send free TO all who
need it, the recipe and direction for mslina tho
simple remedy by which he was cured. Sufferers
wishing to profit by the advisers experience can
90 &c SO by addressing IN perfect confidence, JOHN
a. OuOENi ~ CEDAR ST., New York. 33Sm6
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
Cannot he
EXCELaED.

Charlestown, Mass.
II. r. STEVENS.
Dear Sir This is TO certify that
l have used your BLOOD Prepara-
tion" in my family for several
years, and think that, for Scrofula
or Cankerous Humors or Rheu-
matte Affections, it cannot be ex-
celled; and, as II blood purifier or
spring medicine, it is the best
thing | have ever used, and / have
used almost everything. L can
oheerfully recommend il 20 any
one IN need OF such a me .icine.
Yours respectfully,
Mrs. A. a. DINSMORE,
No. 10 Russell Street.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27

A good idea that of M. De Prud-
homme: "There is nothing more
contemplate than these letters
which people send to me without
daring to sign their names. AS for
me, when / receive an anonymous
letter never open it,"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27
'VEGETIIE, "
PuriRes the Blood, Renovates
and lnvigorateS the
Whole System.

ITS MEDICAL PROPERTIES ARE
Alternative, Tonic, and Dilretic.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-03-27

Ladies must not read this -
'esIqi slseSSus 6mouooT 's1ueo
eAy-6'ueM1 IoJ eeIqa 10 'Suq g
slueo ueL 'qoIuqo eql ol se!IBII!
-xuu eIquuIvA SO eu!uW u! sIv!oos
.mum,,pepesoous eAvq sepIed SnH
Sentinel.