Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1878-01-09

Hartford talks Of n harheI0r show
Yes, give them a show.-Bostor
Post.
No matter what the weather, un.
married clergymen are sure to find
this slippery time.
Went off with fee in his ear
The man who attended the dog
show.-Courier Journal.
"Temple Bar torn down. said
he $50 the crusader women are at
work in England. New York
World.
When the Turk pravs tn his dei-
ty to knock down the Russian pins,
Re wants a bowling Allah.-Cin-
cinnati Saturday Night.
The side door of bar room,
says the Chicago Post is like a
great many peoples prayer books
good only OIL Sunday.
The Husl'and-"My love, what
suit do you prefer seeing me put
on T. The Wife-"Your travelling
suit, my dear.'-Paris Figaro.
Never take bull III the horns,
young man, hut take him hi the
tale, then you kan let go when you
want to.-Jo>h Billings.
The Normau's prayer: "Kind
Heaven, / do not ask for wealth !;
only to he placed within arms
length of a man who has it,"
Conductor to >erdy looking pas
senger-"Ticket, sir" S. L. P
"Ah Thank ,ou; yes. yon may
tick it, SIR Worcester Press.
Tax collector-"Now, look here,
how many more times 40 you want
me to call :" Drfaulter-"Not ever
again, sir, if it's the same to you"
Judy.
Father to son Just from College
-"What have you learned at your
college 2" 1--WE never learn any,
thing; they never let US see the
newspapers"
Day before yesterday man in
New York died so suddenly that
the body was almost cold before
the distracted and gr,eI-stricken
relatives found the will.-Hawkeye.
The young ladies' at Vassar feel
quite AZ home in studying cheinis-
try. They are at once on friendly |
terms with Molly Bendum, Polly |
Hedren, Sal Ainmoniar, Mag Ne
stun and Silly Kate.-Puck.
"Mariah! Mariah! please slet me
in" said a man to his wife, who was
looking out of the window watch
ing him trying to open the door
with a toothpick, "Ish tread on
my key, and it'sh all Hattened out"
II is to he hoped the Atlantic
Monthly will not he a milk and
water publication hereafter. though
it is rather suggestive to see that
the Galaxy. which is the milky
way, has heen mingled with the
Atlantic Boston Hearld.
"Yes. my son." said n fond pa
rent to his attentive son, "the very
hairs of our head are numbered"
"Huh J" exclaimed the youth. gaz-
ing inquiringly upon the badness
of the aged parents head, "that's
nothing. g."-RW.hester Democrat.
Every week we hear nf Young
ladies' abroad, who have
male grand sensations a. singers,
and who expect soon to enlighten
their native land. But they never
give us anything better than pro-
notes.-P. |. Man.
Her fathers cup of tea was boil
ing hot, and he Turned it into his
saucer in the good old fashioned
way. She had never seen anv-
thing drinkahlr TINS served. en-
rept her kittens milk. and she ;
turned 10 her mother with the re-
mark. "Is papa going TO lick it!'
Boston Transcript.
"Will Won always trnst me. dear
psf p he asked. looking down into
her great blue eyes with unspeak.
,hle affection She was sa'rs- i
mp Mt an np town shirt |
store, and she told him business ,
was business. and he'd have 10 paw ,
ash every time.-New York Com {
nercial Advertiser.
He was dapper young man, and
lad been detailed by perching !
party. of which he was n member.