Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1878-12-31
MY ADVENTURES IN smITHBURG.

Make you a pair before Saturday
night, sir,' said the shoemaker
Cant wait, said /: "going out of
town by the next train
''Ohl well, now l think, - replied he,
''here is an uncommon nice pair that
may bell fit They was made for gen
tleman that didn't take em; too small
across here, you see. Try 'em on, sir?
Ahi yes, so, SO, exactly. Why, they fit
like-like they'd been made for youl''
They did fit tolerably well, SO / bought
them. In five minutes more was seated
aboard the cars in Chatham street and
in half an hour more was steaming and
rafting away out of the city toward my
destination. was going on collecting
expedition to that secluded 'little rural
paradise" Smithburgh, which, as you
are aware, is situated about hundred
miles back of the City Hall, and is about
the same number of years behind the
metropolis in the ''modern improve
ments." One of the Smithburghers was
in, debt to my employers, (the great house
of Naryred & Company, of whom you
have doubtless heard, Pearl street. Just
below Fulton.) The aforesaid Smith
burgher was rumored to be ON the eve of
suspension" hence my hurried Journey
Be it remembered that these events oc-
Cured two years ago, at which era debts
were still collectable.
''The shades of night were falling
fast, = when the train deposited my carpet
bag and myself at the Smithburgh sta
ton. l was soon ensconced in the tavern;
an ambitious wooden structure very
garishly white, and very lavish of piazza
without, which qualities were counter
balanced by its being very dirty and very
cramped for room within.
When | went over, in the evening, to
the store of my delinquent debtor, l did
not find him; and very brief conversa-
ton with the people whom l did find,
served to inform me that had come on a
fruitless errand. He had not only sus-
pended, but had decamped out of Smith
burgh into parts unknown. He was a
dead loss, SO far as Naryred and Company
were concerned. All that could be done
with him, was to put him down on the
debit side of the profit and loss account.
There was nothing for it but to go back.
And when does the next train 20
DOWN." inquired ! Of mine host at the
Hotel. y
..No train down till 11.55 AM" was
the curt response.
Just my luck. No money, no assets,
no collection, and now no train.
should have to stay fourteen hours longer
in this dismal country tavern. Tired and
very ill-humored, after nodding an hour
over the same paper l had read the day
before in town, | took my candle, and
took myself off to bed.
1t must have been near midnight, when
was suddenly reused up by a thunder
ing explosion
.sBangr
Bewildered and sleepy, l sat up in bed,
trying to make out whether Naryred and
Company had burst" F" and were unable
to pay ten cents on the dollar; or whether
was aboard a Mississippi steamer which
had collapsed fiue,' and was about to
be scalded with hot steam; or whether
NBangl suddenly went second ex-
plosion, and made out to comprehend
that something was being fired off under
my window.
Jumping up, rushed to the sash, and
peered out. Sure enough, there was
crowd of men and boys, gathered round
what looked like a dilapidated anvil,
ramming it down for third discharge.
1t must be election day in Smithburgh,
thought |, and they are rejoicing over the
result. Confound the successful candi-
date, whoever he is, making such an in
fernal racket
just then, one of the youngsters, look
ing up, caught sight of me, standing in
my shirt at the window He hurriedly
spoke to the others, and then one
shouted
Boys: let's give him three cheersp'
And they did.
''Hoo-oo-raw!"
'Hoo-o -oo-rawn'
"Hoo-oo- o-oo-ra-a-a-awr'
I shrank back, and crept shivering into
bed just as gun number four went off,
amid another set of cheers. One and
thirty times did that Internal piece 90 off
| devoutly praying each time that it
might burst, and SO stop. Then there
were more cheers. Then there was
bonfire, blazing up so suddenly into the
window that / thought the house had
caught fire. 9'Then there was Hail
Columbia, and Yankee Doodle on a