The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1878-02-26

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st. Louis makes q big fuss over hel
bench show. You just ought to see one oil
Sedalia's justice court juries!
st. Louis has 60, baby kangaroo, and
Eugene Field is 90 jealous that he is
practicing day and night on all fours. II
he could keep his smoking tobacco out Of
his pouch, he thinks he could give the
kangy odds.
The English have cannon that shoot:
seven miles.
Rhode Island tried to buy it. but Massa
chusetts won't let her have il unless she
shoots straight up or down.
The Grecian army has marched into
Thessaly. The army said he was too tired
TO 60 any farther, and If they didn't send
somebody to keep him company, he'd b
id il he Was going devastate all Europs
alone.
"A Monroe (iova) Justice Of the Peace
has ruled that father has no right to oe
cuPy his parlor while the daughter and hel
beau have possession.
We move that there be an .intermissiou
in the hugg;ng whenever the fire gets low
80 the old man can bring in an armful oil
wood.
An Iowa schoolmistress has been dis
charged because, for the amusement OF the
children during recess, she stood on hei
head. One Of the trustees CHANGED to SCI
the feat.
1t Was her head, and she had right tc
stand on it and order her partner up, il she
had mind To.
John Morrissey is out Of danger, but il
in danger Of . relapse.
But faro is mighty healthy game. j,
cleans fellow out splendidly. Oh, he'll
be all right when the blue birds sing.
Miss Matilda Joslyn Gage says tina,
AIMS. Swisshelm is . Judas" Aha she
has been ram in sleeps clothing all the
time has ahes Wanted Us to have our
coats button up in the back! BY thunder!
she's got the patent right Of those but,on-in
hind shirts. Whir-r-sz! Tunder an turf!
Shoot the Swisshelm!
The Supreme Court Of Georgia has de-
cided that "for man, without some limo.
cent reason or excuse, to put his arm around
the neck Of another mans wife is an assault
and battery"
Nov suppose . fellow wants to feel for
something in his shoe, and he hoists his
foot up and holds on to his neighbcr's
vifes neck for support with one arm, and
or suppose there's something the matter
with his neighbor's wite's neck, and he puts
his-or suppose his neighbor's wife's neck
accidentally gets in under-or suppose his
neighbOr's wife's neck Oh, thunder hug
il whenever YOU can get a chance and run
the risk.
The low-necked dresses at Washington
receptions can be counted on one hand.-Er.
II the illustrated papers don't lie, some Of
the low-necked dresses, fro N waist up,
would hardly cover one hand.-Norristoxn
HeraId.
Perhaps they might, on . tight squeeze
She said il was very bright idea. He
"a id he knew . brighter one, and when she
~ ked him what il vas, be answered: "yOur
eye, dearw There was silence for q mo-
ment, then she laid her head on the rim Of
his ear and wept.
Miss Winnie Ream is studying the bust
Of Senator Davis.
Winnie, II you want to study bust-one
Of the real old high lonesome kind, just
wait till the next Editorial Convention.
That's bust - il bust. The average
Missouri editor is always busted, but when
they all meet and celebrate their bank
rup.cy. they just get up the bustingess old
bust that ever was busted.
While the dog show is going on in St
Louis. won't Gene Field please 20 and steal
that City thousand dollar dog for us? We
haven't had any bologna for ever 20 long
Mo6eriy Aosito'.
Its ~ much - he can do to steal his own
Bologna, and his feet are only just sticking
through the last link be gobbled.
The Sedalian calls his village the "City
81 Churches." Fourteen spires point heaven
ward in that town but, then. the spires are
, great deal nearer heaven than the SedAlian
ever will be.-Mo6oly Monitor.
Perhaps. But Sedalia can never 70 to
h-l - long - Mobefly takes up its whole
front yard.