The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1878-05-02

Dimocrisy Is a shame, and q delooshun
Ell II wuzn't for my unAlterable attach,
ment 10 the coz | wood 20 over 10 Rad.
ikleism, and end my daze with them. ]
tried 10 do II in Washington, and mkt
with the ablishnists Wun whole day, but
eE nary one Of EN- askt me 10 drink wupst,
/ found il didn't pay; and l returned to
my first love. There amt no yoose. A
man which hez bin a Dimocrat 30 long ez
l hey, hez got te stay with them. There
ain't no other place for him 10 20.
Wat went 10 Washington for wuz 10
git q place under the new Doorkeeper.
He was q Coniedrit General, and the i'm.
preshn wuE current down here that none
but Confedrits wuz 10 be appintid to POI
sishuns hereafter. We had eyry reason
TO bleeye II when we saw a number that
he'd bin appintid, and when went away
from the Coss Roads, in search Nv this
posishum, the citizens wuz 90 confident
that ! would git II, and never come back,
that they held q sort Nv q joobilashen.
"Luck TO 700" sed Bascom, with
700 gone l kin weather the hard times
easier, shall save largely in likker, and
chalkp
II WIZ mere force Nv habit, suppose,
but Bascom did RELY chalk down all the
drinks took, juste he wood agin man
from which he expected 10 git something.
He is very melhodikle biEniI man, is
BAscom.
And Deekin Pograms face beemed
with sOlissitood and Joy, Ell l departid.
~ don't like TO lose wat 700 owe me"
he sed, but it's better 10 lose wat II is
now, than 10 let It go on and git bigger.
May 700 succeed, and like Washington so
much that you'll never leeye 1t.
And / he'd similar erpreshuns Nv good
will from all the citizens. ] shood hev
liked 1t better ef the congratulations he'd
come from those which ] didn't owe so
much, but II was suthen TO hev congratu.
lsshen from somebody.
On my arrival at Washington went
TO General Fields with all the confidence
in the world. ! he'd with me enuif ere.
denshals to make me minister Of England
eli Their he'd bin & Dimecratic administra-
shen. he'd my eertfiket Nv seryis in the
Looisianer Pelkins, / he'd statement Nv
losses Nv property by Fedrel cavalry, ]
he'd several certiiiki,s, written by myseli,
nv heroic ackshens ate WIZ disabled
aud left the servis, and ! had my comishn
er Postmaster, signed by A. johnson.
These / presentid.
They stnmped General Fields, and like
wise The Dimocratic members wich is
helpin him to dispense the patronage Nv
his posishun.
Wneyer saw better credeushuls," sed
the Doorkeeper, "nor them which more
entities a man TO considerashun. Blu,
wat kin ] do? / bev but one place left
and the House dissent legislate more
places for me 10 give. | am in sore dis
tress."
"Wat kin VOC doc ?" asked ], II know
wat 700 kin doc with that one appint-
meni n sed with great ierver, "yoo kin
end you suspense and Likewise that NV
all other applicance, by given II to me.
Is Their any one more entitled 10 III Did
eny applicant do better servis Tor the Con.
iederscy? Is there one among EN- which
suffered more for the Lost Coz than did :?
l will assoom the dooties Nv the posishun
to. morrow."
"My dear sirl" replied General Fields,
~ wish Good show 700 how much l am
greeved, and how much am sorry for
700. But 700 can't hev that place. ]
admi. the almost overwhelming necessity
for giyin II 10 700, but the fact IL, North
ern Dimocricy must hev suthinl We
can't ignore them altogether. Troo, they
didn't tite for us-troo they went loonatic
and submitted todrafts agin us-troo they
paid taxes with which 10 crush us, but
nevertheless they must be considered. ]
hev saved this one appointment for a
Northern Dimecrat from lllinoy, and he
must hev II, sz it is the only one left. 700,
Il troo Dimecrat won't object to il, Con.
slider, my dear cir, that we must hev the
Northern Dimocrisy TO vote with ns,that
we may gil fully into power in 1880. We
don't like EN- eny better than VOC do, but
we must hev EN-. And how wood II look
for me to give erery place hev, ez Door.
keeper In the Honse Nv Representatives,
to Southern men! Itwon't do. This one
place must 20 North, and it shell"
saw there WIZ no yoose argooin with
him, and reluctantly l walked away. My
hopes NV a substanshel Twin wuz blocked,
and | wuz no better OF than when ! left
the Corners. General Fields remarked,
ez I left, that the Reform House wood
probably make some new places in a week
or two, q there Wuz 4 thousand or more
like me which hedn': bin fixed, and ef ]
wood wait, he wood promise me the very
frat under the new batch.
"Yes!" replied, bitterly. "But wat
good will 1t do me to wait for an appint.
men,3 The day the new offises Is ordered
shell be found in my bed ded Nv starya.
shen."
"Troo!" sed Fields, "troo. It's hard.
But stop! 1 hev it. / can't give 700
place, but I'll tell 700 wat 10 do! Go to
the White House and show the same ere
denshels 700 hey showd 10 me. Penetrate
to the President hisself, and see that he
her EN-. Demand nv him-yoo only re-
ksSteduy me, but demand Nv him-a place.
Demand ii ez Coufedrit which suffered,
and one which wants reconcilin. Shake
the entire Corners at him. It wood be
we'll TO cAlsomine yoor nose before 700
see him, and ei possible git on a eileen
shirt. The Dimocratic Congrishnal com.
nifty hey eileen shirts for sich ez we hev
TO send 10 the President for places Nv
trust, which we loan Of they kin deposit
Their yalyoo ez secoority for Their return
after they git appointments. And al'o,
restrane yoor profanity ef possible. And
also, ef possible, remember snatch Nv
one Nv Watts hymnsl The dockyments
700 hey shoWd me will git wat 700 want
from him. The President is in the con-
siliating business heavy, and Their amt no
reason why 700 shoodeut hey gotius
place. The era Nv good feelin Is inaug-
ura,id, and the President knows that Their
amt but one way Nv conciliatin rs. Co
my friend, straig BIT to the White House.
Wat can't do for voc, the President will"
/ an goin 10 try II, but | must confess
that / hey no idee Nv succeedin. The
President is mighty forgivin,but possibly
he may stop little short Nv wat Is nee.
essary to conciliate me. He may objsk
10 iorgiyin US and then pAyin us for the
privilege nv bein forgiven. But Il can't
do no harm TO try, and so shell make the
essay, All that stands in the way is the
yalyoo nv the clean shirt kin do the