The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1878-05-30
MISCELLANEOUS.

4 Kansas COW will probably excite
the envy of all her bovine companions
in fly time. as she has two well-deyel-
oped tails.
\ Lincoln, VT, man has dog who
took a 3 greenback i'll his mouth and
went to the town clerk, yelped for a IL
cense and received it.
where did | get such nose as this
DOCTOR" asked lady patient of DR..
Abemethy. ''Out of the decanter,
madam, > was the reply.
The most remarkable Of recent Amer
lean humbugs was probably the con
grass of beautiful women" which has
just closed III New York.
Formerly men remaining unmarried
in England at the age of twenty-five
were called old bachelors, and were by
law fined according to their station
in life
Mercy Consolation Smith is the name
of the handsomest girl in Fort Wayne,
and happy will the young man be who
can one day exclaim, "Oh. Mercy, thou
art my Consolation.
The first Chinese railroad has proved
financial failure, and somehow it don't
work very we'll in mechanical point
of view. Now the government is es-
tablishing a telegraph.
4 priest said to peasent, whom he
thought rude, ~ on are better fed than
taught SHOULD think | was" re-
piled the clOd-hopper, ''as feeds my
self and YOU teaches me-
By their indulgence in strong drink
the Swedes have deteriorated in stature
and in physical strength; new diseases
being induced, and old ones sorely ag-
gravated by irtemperance.
AS a corn-growing state Tennessee
ranks sixth, though in 1910 it stood
first. The average annual production
of this great cereal is from forty-ive
million to fifty-five million bushels.
WHEN the Para had glided into what
the reporter usually calls her native
element" Johnny Roach slapped Ru-
therford in the back and cried, "Of all
my beauties there's the Para gone,"
lie ran three squares after what he
thought was street-car, and, after he
got out of BREATH he laid down on the
doorstep, disguised to find out that it
was only lightning bug on his specta-
cles
What have you been adoin'?'' asked
a boy of his playmate, whom he saw.
coming out of a house with tears in his
eyes. I've been a chasln' a birch rod
round my father" was the snarling
reply.
Special agents show that the govern
ment has collected only Sl99,99S for
timber stumpage from 1856 to 1877,
while the value of timber stolen during
the last ten years is estimated at $20,-
UO0,090.
"Well, swan, Billy" said an old far
mer to an understood nephew who was
visiting him, when you take off that
ere plug hat and spit two or three
times there amt much left of you, is
| tn? =
! A wit having been asked by another
person whether he would advise him to
/ lend u certain friend of theirs money,
said: "What! lend him money? You
might give him an emetic, and he
wouldn't return it,"
| THEY are going to have an artificial
Niagara Falls at the Paris Exposition;
| bat unless an American is charged $15
| for looking at it, and has his pocket
picked by hackman, he will fail to re-
cognize it.
An Indiana girl at Vassar college
| writes to her parents: This is the most
stylish hair pin of boarding-school |
ever tumbled to. / can eat four times
| a day if l want to, and get fair whack
| at the hash every time"
a Harrisburg paper, in answering
the questions of correspondent, says:
"When Il lady and gentleman are walk
ing together upon the street, the lady
should walk inside of the gentleman
Good gracious! what an idea.
Prisoner" said Squire Jones, in
awarding Judgment, cit is maxim of
Low l,nt &c 70 a.,
mercy. The court has made up her
mind which side she will err on. and
nothing remains but to err on that side.'
a three-year-old youngster saw a
drunken man lacking" through the
street. Mother" said he, did God
make that man?n Yes, my child"
The little boy reflected moment, and
then exclaimed: Il wouldn't have done
It,"
A LITTLE four-year- old, being told by
a young man in the village to get off his
knee, that he was to heavy to hold in
that way, made quite sensation among
the parties present by lisping back. "Too
neaFy, ney: Slstef Kate weighs one hun
dred pounds more than I, and you held
her on your knee over two hours last
Sunday night
GRACE GREENWOOD was standing in a
Washington horse-car, when q sudden
start of the car threw her over into a
gentleman's lap, when she said, 81 beg
pardon sir; but you see | am Lapland-
err"
WHILE the wine was being passed
around during the administration of the
sacrament at a Minneapolis, Mimi,
church the other Sunday, the cohgrega-
tion was electrified by the sudden excla-
nation of little boy, "Ma, I'll take
beer ~