The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1878-06-13
life must end sometime"

Weut away CnIOuSu tue moonlight.
All night knelt at my window, with nv
head upon the sill, in trance of woe and
agony. When the morning came, arose
from my knees, and, throwing. myself
upon the bed, slept from sheer
exhaustion.
A few weeks later, in company with
my mother (she was all I had in the
world), I started for Europe. l hoped
in other lands, and amid new and chang
ing scenes, to find some surcease to my
sorrow. did not know then bow hard
it is to rid ones self of haunting grief,
for sorrow follows, like gaunt spectre,
whithersoever your footsteps tend; stalks
by your side, claims admittance to your
heart, and will not leave you.
We were on the sea at last-the beauti-
full, smiling, treacherous sea, so clam and
blue and peaceful above, but with such
depths of woe and dispair within his
bosom, when the white faces turn upward
to the light, and the sea moss tangles in
the floating locks, and the coral insect
builds where the mortal rest remains of
those who 60 down to the sea in ships"
For the first day or SO I was confined
to my stateroom, very i'll and dreary and
hopeless. On the evening of the second
day I came up on deck, determined to
obtain breath of fresh air. Lying on a
pile of rugs, with a book in my hand,
not for the reading, but rather as an
excuse for silence, a familiar voice fell
on my ears. Trembling and agitated, /
turned my head, and saw standing at
my side-John Vandeleur! He put out
his hand, but motioned it away; dar-
ed not touch it; l felt that it was more
than l could bear. He stood gazing up
on me for a moment.
elbow came you here?" I faltered, at
last.
A spasm of pain crossed his white face.
"She!" he mu+tered. savagely-" she is
here-on bord. For the sake of sparing
you the pain of chance encounters, I was
going to Europe. But we met again, and
and on board of the same vessel. There
is strange fatality in it, JESSIE"
That night was wakened from my
sleep by the rushing and roaring of the
storm fend, the hoarse commands OF the
captain, and the sSrieks and prayers of
terrified women. ! arose, and throwing
on a wrapper, aroused my mother, and
together we sought the CABIN. 1t was a
scene of terror upon which I had never
berore gazed, and which I hope nver to
witness again. The loud roar OF storm
without nearly drowned the wailing and
lamentation of those within. 1 glanced
towards John Vanderleur's wife. She
was standing cool and self-possessed,
leaning against the piano. her great dark
eyes full of scorn at the display Of terror
around her. Just then the captain, death
white and agonizcd, rushed into the
cabin:
"Save vourselves." he shouted. ave
have sprung a leak, and are going down."
There was rush forward, and. Selling
my mothers hshd, L dragged her after
me in the wake of the crowd. The lite
boats we're soon launched, but all save two
were instantly swamped, and these. filled
in moment to Overflcwing, darted away
through the white-capped water. and toss
ing from billow to billow, we're soon out
of sight, leaving some half-dozen stand
ing upon the deck. The ship was filling
fast with water; in short time we would
be beyond the reach OF human aid. Still
clinging to my mothers hand, glanced
hopelessly upon the groupe gathered to-
gether. Six of us all told, and two of
them were John Vandelcur and the
woman whom he called wife. l noted
his presence with strange gladness; no
matter what happened, we were together.
At that awful moment, face to face with
death and eternity, found no sin in the
love which overflowed my heart for this
man.
And so, crouching upon the deck of
doomed vessel, we watched the morning
break gray and dreary and awful, gleam-
ing upon that waste of water and the hu-
man beings awaiting death. A day
break we saw the vessel could hold up NO
longer, and spars and masts and all avail
able objects were secured; to these frail
supports each awestricken creature was
dashed, and was soon floating upon the
water.
The storm was over now; the waves
were still, and the sky shone blue and
bright. At last, with great noise, the
noble ship went down. and the cold. dark
waters closed over it for ever.
A skudder passed over Us as We chung
to frail supports, and realized then, with
death standing beside us upon how
slight . tenure our lives hung. And SO
We floated tor hours and hours. Looking
back now upon that time, 1t seems like
an endless age, in which we moved slowly
over the shining surface of the sea. l
closed my eyes at last, hardly conscious
of what was doing. When opened
them again l drifting slowly along, and
John Vandeleur's wife was clinging to
the spar beside me. How she came
there never knew. An evil light shot
into her bold black eyes as they met
mine.
~ know ALL" she Kissed, transfxing
me with her wicked gaze, land hate
you"
She drew from her bosom something
that shone and scintillated in the sunlight.
1t was dagger. Great Heavens! Face
to face with death as We were, what need
to hasten the dresdful end, I glanced
about us. We had floated away at some
distance from the rest, and were quite
alone upon the water. The fires of mad
ness burned in the womans eyes.
IF l perish she continued, in the
same hooking tones, s.you shall not sur
vive to marry John Vandelear.7
Ifelt the hand Of death 1t my heart