The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1878-08-15
EvERY.DAf sfIoERIBs.

- : Is;eI {.
EVERYDAY sPIcERFEs.
MADE Of awl work-Shoes.--B Bogag /
Commerciak t.{
The head of Boston man is broader
than it is long. This shows what "a I
bean diet will do for the brain -Nep
Hdven Register. sisssst ~
EVEN the Russian Language has not
the power to describe the feeling Of the !
man with mosquito-bite between his
shoulder-blades.-Rockla Courier. 8 e
WHAT makes man wild in these
days is to pay five dollars for medical
consultation in which be is ordered to
wear an aIlwool undefshirt. II PUCK. II "a
THE anti-Murphyites in lthe West
have christened new drink the Red
r bbon. !" They wear their coiorszUh
the end of the nose. =: Noiristoun Herald /
A BASEBALL player was never elected
to Congress. This fact should be
strong inducement for our youths to -
Organize baseball clubs NoyTistoacn
Hert1ld. III r rfJtl .ssisfafes s21Efi,
"I MOTIFS one thing. The man who
rides on the kaTs every day is satisfied
with one seat; but the man. who rides.
once in a year wants at least foaf. adj
Josh Billings. =. : ---
The unnatural eagerness with which
those Capron. Ill, people paid O. dollar5s
apiece to witness that PUBLIC suicide has
been explained: The man was barber;
-pA&- Ie---I I'LL = I'll Z n ! .
ABOUT four o'clock q resident ofq
Whitney-street drove his chickens into
the smokeshouse, Il cause, de, co1lipse
was comm !" and be I" didn't want dem
caught out after dark. - Bnsg hduston
Republicans. $50 gi7nt1 ssat
; WEATHER notes for women :.i A. per-
ishing member of the gentle sisterhood
who breathed her last sigh in St. Louis
during the warm weather, solemnly di-
rected that a large palm-leaf fan should
be placed inher coffin Rochester Dssion. y
MOTHER storm coming unless We are
KY danfsaaa 3; the flss. 3 How eaa
man write and keep both ears and . :
well developed bald head comfortable,
at the same time = Rochester Denaocrdt.
,swnAr monarch do I mind you Of, II 1al
Ny little one? said Gaspar,
As with his evfr-handy arms sf 10 cof3
he suddenly did clasp herr.
at can not tell" she made reply ses1St
Tne while be sought to squeeze ,er,
"You can't7 Why. bent something Like u
-'''''- - s'''e' s-Yoahes Caste
WE met a farmer day or two ago
who was 80 hard pushed that he was on
his way to pawn his hoe. We told him
we were sorry to see his case SO hopeless.
{" Hopelessp' he exclaimed; far from
| it! You know the old motto, hoe
pawn, hope ever - Yonkers Gazette.
THE United States army is pretty
busy Just now. One of them goes out
to fight twelve thousand Indians every
morning while the other stays at home
and gets breakfast. It's wearing though
lon the army. The Indians don't ap-
pear to mind it much. Bridgeport
Standard.
THE Shah took thirty-six caskets of
! gold to Paris and took away only eleven.
! If he had visited Niagara Falls several
years ago with his thirty-six caskets Of
gold, and remained a week or two, he
would have been obliged to borrow ten
dollars from a newspaper man to get
home. -Norristoacn Herald. 4 Ailf
| THE other day.. as two newly arrived
i Micks were walking up Kesrney street,
pavement trap door opened and
Chinese store porter emerged. Be
gorrar said one of the Paddles, : if the
haythens haven't got tunnel clane
through from Chinee, bad luck to thin !"
San Francisco Neacs Letter.
MrNr,s Fan de Vieu responded
,ot;an+ wo;ter az he stenned mn readily
to tbe bar with the three who were in-
yited to ioin a newcomer. Yes, and
vou'ye owed a V here now these SIX
weeks said the barkeeper. /" and ought
To he branded as man that don't paw"
And he was 30 branded. ~ Commerciial
Bulletin. =.
wv have a nr;nter IL the Journal o.
fce-a real, live printef--who keeps b
snnnlv of chewing tobacco constantly
On hand and has never been known to
borrow His name Ia Charles Smith
nlo;n nnassnm;nr name. Int one
which shonld shine npon the page of
history among the loftier titles Of 'heroes
who have wooed and won fame by less
! unpretentious means.-Ss. Louis Journal.
AN ex-Mavor. of Chelsea. Mass. to
wbon, as tn many Others. the past few
| years have not been productive of much
} financial nrosperity. has, taken off his
ooat and zone 70 work in his brickyard.
| doing the q striking n-lthe hardest paft
of | t5a work--h;mself. and eudplovinp
his carr;ave horse in grinding CLAW. He
Continues to nav a hundred Cents on the
: dollar and in, this. as in other respects
is altogether behind the times Com
: mercial Bulletin. siss s'a1
: JUsr before the public schools in New
|. Haven closed for the. vacation, lady
4 teacher in one of the departments gave
ont the word "fob" for her clsssott
. SMELL. After it was spelled, as was hel
custom she asked the meaning Of it