Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1878-05-30
Wit and H1,11O1'.
a celebrated case-The printers.

a celebrated case-The printers.
a rolling mill-A fight in the gutter.
"Winding up misunderstanding til
clock.
\ lawyer Is to be hanged iii Texas. Goo
beginning. Go on.
An exchange Gays: "The latest thin,
in hosiery is lcg.h We don't see it.
The latest song out is entitled, ''Pu
your arms around me pet, the old man
eyes are shet."
A baby iz necessity, but twins alwllz
did seem to me to be ov a speculative na
/ ture.-Josh Billings.
dying in poverty" says moderi
moralist, ''is nothing; it is living in pov
erty that comes hard Oh fellow"
The New York Herald heads notice o
a sermon on future punishment: "IIel
undergoing alterations and repairs''
us it possible to fyy' If her father
wears No. II boot it is not only possible
but impefativelv necessary.
An abandoned wretch afiirms that ir
engaging a wife only ring is necessary
but nothing short of tile cash will secure
q good hired girl.
The Connecticut man who invented
wooden hams might do 4 profitable BUSH
ness here by drying snow and selling it for
salt.
Despite the change of water Grant eX-
pericnces in his travels, his health con-
tinucs good. Probably this is because he
doesn't use wafer.
Spilkins, after having shown his young
est boy how to black his own boots every
morning, remarked that ''there's nothing
like having a little son shine in the house."
Jennie June says a fashionable bonnet
can be had for dollar and half And
SO it can. 1t is the from six to twenty
dollars worth of trimming that strikes the
pocket-book in a sore spot.
Fame is tardy in reaching some men,
but ifa man is deserving, it is bound to
strike him sooner or later. A Berks cOun-
ty editor has had a blue-and-red canal boat
named aft'.s' him.
\ train ct cars on the Florida railroad
the other day passed man on horseback.
and there Was a great hurlahing anon" the
passengrrs until they discovered that the
animal was tied to a fence.
The fellow who married her sister to
please his dying wife, finds the wife recov-
cring. and don't know what to do with the
sister who is now on his hands. That is
what ails German family named Suitz,
living in New York,
Time is money; but, judging from the
indolent life led by some persons. we think
they would be willing to exchange allo-
pathic quantities Of time for homcopllatic
doses of money.
An exchange has long and carefully
written article intended to prove that rum
is "a slow poison The writer will have
the sincere thanks of thousands of readers
thousands who will be glad to hear that
the poison is slow.
An editor apologized to his readers after
this fashion,; "We expected to have
death and marriage to publish this week,
but a violent storm prevented the wedding,
md the doctor being sick himself, the
patient recovered, and We are accordingly
cheated uut of BOTH"
A wag once remarked on seeing friend
after dinner eating piece of ancient cheese,
that it reminded him of Samson killing his
and then improved the parallel
Dy suggesting the identity Of the weapon
lsed.
A man, however innocent he may be, is
always cnveloped in thick cloud of dam
aging circumstantial evidence when he
leans up against the hotel corner, carefully
picks out wooden toothpick. and tfies to
light it on the top ola glass cigar case.-|
Burlington Harkeye.
A Yankee photographer presented a re-
,olver at the head of a gentleman who was
sitting for his photograph, with the cheer
ing remark: "My reputation as an artist
S at stake. Ifyou don't look smiling Ill
blow your brains out" He smiled.
The following is translation of bill
If fare at a German banquet in honor of
Bayard Taylor.
Cigars,
beer,