The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1878-05-10
WIT AND HUMoR

1t will not do to report that . man Ia
eorned because his voice is husky.
Base ball and cricket are not SO far apart,
after all; one depends upon the pitcher,
aud the other the bowl.
There are a good many recipes floating
around for packing butter, but non Of them
can beat the old-fashioned way Of packing
it on q hot biscuit.
AL hair-pins look alike to men; but let .
wife go of on a visit, and come home and
and a hair-pin near the gate, and she cant
wait q minute to grow red in the face.
The average pedestrian does not begin 10
realize how many trap-doors are left open
in the sidewalks until he finds himself
mixed up with somebody's winter supply Of
coal.
A curious gTimaee was seen on the faces
Of asmAH congregation in Connecticut as th'
o~ommunion-cuP was passed around. Til.
deacon had taken the vinegar-iug for TIM
holding the sacramento wine.
Two gallons of whisky were consumed by
a colored man before he fully recovered
from the bite Of a tarantula, It was then
discovered that he had been stung by Q
wasp. The men who contributed the whisky
were too mad to speak above u whisper.
A San Francisco girl took strichnine, for
the purpose, as she explained before her
death, of splitting her lover. He had shown
signs Of prcferring another, and when the
idea struck her that by killing herself she
was leaving the field clear to her rival, she
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saved.
Mrs. Partington says she did not marry
her second husband becruse she loved the
male ser; butjust because he was the same
ase Of her first husband. and could wear
out his old clothes.
An Idaho invalid was ordered by \ physi.
clan 10 take three unce OF brandy a day,
and knowing that sixteen drachms make an
ounce, has patiently been taking forty-eight
drinks 3 day ever since.
"No one would take you for what you
are" said m old-fashioned gentleman Q day
or two ago TO a would-be-dandy. who had
mora hair than brains. Why ?" asked Joe.
Because they can't see your ears."
Sam. did you see Mr.. johnson. the new
0verseerf ?" "Yes. mAssa 1 met him down
by the cotton gin" Hes a good looking
fellow isn't hep" We'll. massA. he talks
like a good looking man he made a bow
dat's al he said"
We Hnd the following item IN an Illinois
paper: "Mr.-,w who has been In re-
tirenent for a few weeks after marrying
and burying three sisters, came up smiling
to the altar again yesterday. having begun
on q new family"
It is recorded OF an old deacon, now dead,
who used to lead the singing in u country
church. that finding the concluding word
Of = hymn Jacob had not sylables enough
to fill up the music properly. he ended it
thus: Ja-a-a-fol-de-riddle-cob
Two little girls were lately prattling
together and one OF them said "wekeep
four servants, have got six horses. and lots
Of carriages; now what have you got p
With quite as much pride the other an.
swered. We've got 3 skunk under our
barn" ..E.Ht
mister. how do you sell sugar to-day p
only twenty cents a pound, sir" Cant
give it. IN drink my coffee without sugar
and kiss my wife for sweetening. Good
day air." GOOD day. When you gel
tired of that kind OF swoetening. please cal
again" al will" He called the next day
The champion baegsge-smasher runs OF
the West Wisconsin Railroad. When the
Eau Claire traveler reaches home with two
traps, a broken hinge and a handful o.
b~nss-headed tacks. he is thankful that q
part Of his trunk is spared him. and tina,
The straps were not split into shoe. strings
-Aileaukes Sentinel.
At the earnest request" Of several
soung men, a Missouri paper publishes the
following bit Of information: "Thore is
sothing 30 tends 10 shorten the lives of old
people and to iniure their health as the
practice Of sitting up late. especially winter
evenings, and more especially when there
b grown-up daughter in the family"
TIE PRrcE OF sLEroH-R rp,se.-Ap gentle.
nan walked into a stable uptown the
sther day, and asked the price Of a
Aorse and sleigh for four hours. 1.-THE
srice." said the livery man, pointing out
. specimen, "is tan dollars an hour, but
you can nave It TOT hours for thirty-ave."
.Thirty-fve r. said the gentleman quiet
y. "oh, my good friend. you misundsr-
Rand ne; I don't want to buy the horse
md sleiah. I oulS Bsnt 70 Mrs them -