The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1878-09-12
EVERYDAY sPICERIEs.

Through the treachsrous swirls of the Shiny soap?
--Ba A.gton Has0keye
EVERYDAY SPICERIES.
THE fox knows much, but more. he
that catches him.
You never see dark complexioned
dumb man, because dumb man can It
tan, sir.-Keokuk Consultation.
WoBK on the Washington Monument
is going on briskly. Some one has made
a report Of what ought to be dome
Neac Orleans Picay,uae.
The Christian hatelligencer asks, What
is so rare as an honest manT' That is q
singular question for religious paper
to Breakfast Table.
WHEN Tennyson wrote Break, break,
break on the cold gray stones he must
have been thinking of the chain-gang.
ST. Louis Post Scissors.
THERE is man in Pittsburg who is
SO thin that window-glass company
there have hired him to cut glass with
his elbow joint Wheeling Ledger.
A MAN named Ramsey was choked to
death at Wardsville, Ont, by grain of
wheat. Here is another argument in
faver Of taking your grain in liquid
state Incorporate Exchange.
TIE Graphic remarks that too many
American Judges imagine themselves on
thrones and put on kingly airs. This is
real mean or rather it would be if it
were not true.-Bgfalo Eapress.
THE announcement appears in q
window on Washington-stree Wanted:
girls to crochet. We should think that
most girls who submitted to the process
indicated would be worsted. - Boston
Journal.
THOSE persons who are continually
persecuted by boys viii be soothed to
learn that con an average, six boys a
week have been drowned this summer
while bathing in the Thames. - Courier
journal.
A PROMINENT young lawer went fish
| ing at Jamaica Pond the other day. He
| wore white gloves and took darkey
| along to put bait on his hooks, take off
the fish, and hold an umbrella over
him.-Boston Globe.
AN infant who will insist on bowling
and kicking after being rendered the
last toothbrush and only egg-beater in
the house, sadly needs that regular
motion of the elbow which Solomon
invented and patented Detroit Free
Press.
WE do not wish needlessly to create
bad feeling or serious trouble between
this country and England, but is it, can
| it be true that Disraeli actually paid
out of his own pocket for the brass bands
that spontaneously welcomed him home?
-Bw lipgton Ha,ckeye.
Pro BoNo PUBLICo. Brown (passen-
ger by the Glasgow steamer, s :30a. m. -
II beg pardon, sir, but / think you have
made mistake. That is my tooth
brush" McGrubbie ditto =" Alb beag
years, mum, him sure. All thought t
/ belonged to the sheip." Punch.
PLUCK, not luck, ruts man ahead in
this world, and leaves lot of envious
persons at the foot of the ladder quarrel
ing over their pedigrees, trying TO sponge
pass out of some sympathetic friend.
or steal up under the shadow of some
self-made man.-ElmirG Gazette.
! WHEN a visiting friend whom you
would not offend for all the world, and
whose entertainment is your every care,
repeatedly sings, 81, me, sweet home,
there Is no place like home" and still
persists in staying with you, what are
you going to do about itf-Ronsc Sen
tinel.
THE Graphic has discovered that all
the historical angels of revelation, poetry
and art were masculine, without single
exception" 1t may have been that
way, but we defy all history TO show
when and where one of them ever made
catnip tea that could be depended ON
in trying moments.-B Breakfast Table
E. QUEsrRIAN, giving rein to his
humorous fancy, said to his wife, $ Il
you don't stirrup your coffee you viii
lose all traces of the sugar, and saddle
be the consequence Mrs. E. @. didn't
like the remark a bit, but she bridled
her temper so well that no one could tell
BY her carriage that she was little
sulky.-Mec York Comicdl Advertiser.
THE katydid may sing her song,
The beetle he may whistle;
The grassho per chew the ripening corn;
The taterbug eat the thistle;
The bullfrog croak the whole night long,
, And with the freely tussle;
While nightingales sing dreamy songs,
And bees get on their muscle. 8
! Their noise combined will not awake
The sleeper half so quick
As the gay mosquito when he alighfs
And In his bill doth stick
-Msp York Ezprss.
SOMEHOW or other, when a man goel
to Texas, he seems to think that hi
r friends up north would appreciate moth
1 ing SO highly as the present of livt
3 horned frog. A live horned frog is no
1 particularly beautiful to look upon, bu
, It makes the most thrilling and attract
: i've addition to the james jambs menag
erie you ever hollered" " at.-Experi
/, enced HaaOkeye Editor.
!, OF course the chances are million
!, to one against it, but lightning vii
sometimes strike in unexpected places
Q and there is the remotest possibility tina
the forthcoming portrait gallery of tn
:, paragraphers may bring out the crushin
= discovery that one of their numbe
/ parts his hair in the middle. Shoul
s such be the case, the association viii, o
/ course, resolve with fearful eyes to wea
J, the usual badge of mourning thirt
q DAYS, and cherish only the virtues Of th
Z lamented brother Breakfast Table.
lss AS a curiuos fact, it has been noted b
u Sir Samuel Baker that a negro hs
P never been known to tame wild ell
e. phant or any wild animal. The ell
plants employed by the ancient Garth
or einians and Romans we're trained t
ze Arabs and others, never by negroes.
of had often struck Sir Samuel as very di
tressing that the little children inAfri,
never had pet animal; and though