The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1878-11-27
ALEXANDRIA, La, WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 81, 1878.
ALL SORTS.
We all loved Johnny Green
He got choked with o bean

He got choked with bean
IS to Up his nose. atf
johnny was frst-class fellow.
But the bean went up his smellow,
And he rose.
Oshkosh Christian Advocate
"A Wheeling woman is so feshy
that she can't lean against anything.
Il New York Medical Review.
1t was a retired comb manufac-
turer who wrote: "Buffalo honesty
is the best policy" Buffalo Elk
press.
s. MIR. Talmage says.hell has four
gates. We hope they open outward,
so as to give easy egress in case Of
accident. Northwestern Christian
Advocate.
Wide belts will be worn this
season, but they will not equal in
size those disposed upon the school
boy who puts pepper on the stove.
II Hawkeye.
The wise man placeth the stock
Of his gun to his shoulder before he
freth, but the fool looketh down the
barrel to see the ball start.-[N. Y.
Medical Journal.
1t is said that Rufus Choate
was indifferent to the amount Of his
fee only after he had succeeded"
II may be remarked right here that
Choate was the last Of his race.
-[Evarts.
The horse probably lives who
will yet trot in ITO, but after he
does it, will the price Of -four come
down, or will street-car drivers be
less anxious to bob tail passengers
into the mud7--[spirit Of the Times.
The great Chinese wall was late
~ measured by an American, when
he could not make it over eighteen
feet high in any place he took a sol
emn vow to kill historian once a
month during the year Of 1879.
New Orleans Times.
Ajax defed the lightning, ac-
cording to the old poets, with con-
siderable success. II must be re-
membered, however, the fluid was
not the modern Jersey variety.
This makes AL the difference ia the
world.-[ Jersey Herald.
The woman who has sufficient
command Of several foreign langua-
ges, 50 that she can swear Justify in
the presence Of her children when
she shoves needle up to the thumb
bone, is the envy fseventeen neigh.
bers and a pious old deacon - Her
aid aud Presbyter. .iss4
This is about the time Of year
when the Queens cousty farmer dis
covers in hidden nook in his field
the remains Of a squash which, ii
gathered in time, would have been a
half pound heavier than the one
which took the first premium.
Country Gentleman. 3l
"A comprehensive proaoun: Hair
dresser (affably It's ard upon i US,
sir, to be in town lat this time 81 the
year" The colonel "Ah, suppose
you would like to take your family
down to the seaside" Hair dresser
81 have no family, sir. Imeant it
was ard upon me and you"
/ Punch.
Z why do I weep7 asks a poetic
young lady in a new song. Doubt
less the fair anthoress has no book
OF domestic recipes, or she would
not need TO ask. AS she seems to
suffer greatly we append the necessa-
~ means Of relief: They should be
cnt up in salt water, and allowed to
stand for at least two hours, when,
by adding little vinegar, they may
be eaten without producing the tear
full effects Of which our fair friend
complains. IN. Y. Observer.
My dear" l said to 4 five.year-
old one night as she concluded her
prayer at her mammals knee, "you
have forgotten to pray for your little
cousins. How did that happeni
Don't you want our Heavenly Father
to take care Of them7" She made q
motion of again bending her knees,
yawned sleepify, and tumbled into
bed. Cant help it, mamma! Ba.
by is too tired! Horace and Eddie
must scufile for themselves just this
! = 80 ( 49,
one night" Herald and Presb; ter
1t took three men, two boys and
q brindle dog an hour and a ha,,s, i,
drive q sandy pig i. distance q tw,
blocks, down 70 the ferry boa. yes
terday afternoon. When The weari
some drive was ended, the dog wa,
DIT IN three places, the boy la.
spralIed his ankle. broken iva Win