The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1878-01-24
NarteMg.

"The Dolor of our Dads" is the most
melancholy comment yet developed by
the silver discussion.
Philadelphia disputes with us the title
to "Paris of' America" The impudent
thing i Chicago Enquier.
Furrin language-Customer to Furrier
"What are those fur?" Furrier-"Those
are fur Capes."
A Cincinnati !'society" reporter says
"there's no end to balls" Balls, we be-
lieve, are always round. - NOrriStown
Herald.
The Courier Journal explains that the
man on the Indiana State seal, who is
chopping down a tree is not George
Washington.
The Rev. Mr.. Tooth. the English rtu-
alist, who has beautiful set of twins,
who are commonly known as his "little
double teeth"
The Danbury News says: "The man
who swore off is beginning to observe,
with great feeling, We've got but one
life to live, anyway"
"If this financial footing isn't stopped,
says Chicago paper, some Congress,
men will be hurt" There's one Repre-.
sentative Hurt, we believe, already.
"a place for everything, and every.
thing in its place." as the old woman said
when she slowed the broom, bellows
balls of yarn, two babies, curry comb
three cats, and grid.iron, into an old
oven.
He was solemn looking traveller, and
he walked through the depot singing
Heaven is my home" wheE one Of the
boys called out "Then you are going the
wrong way, stranger. That is the train
to New York.
At a parting at the Chicago railroad
station--"Do not forget me" murmured
the husband. Never, neverp sobbed
the wife, and she pulled out handker
chief and tied a knot in it, that the might
remember
A regular Hercules is brought up fol
aggravated assault The COurt-"Have
you any one to defend you ?" Prisoner
(picking up chair)-"I can defend my.
self, Come on, all Of you" Cleans ou
the court room.
You can get a very good idea of mat
ural selection" in its practical workings
by viewing a celery glass after it has
been once around the table, Burlington
Hdwkeye.
In reply to the question rs there {
He'll ?" Mr.. Lotion; ofSt. Louis, surmi
ses that every man digs his own. lfthi'
indeed prove the case look out for live
ly rise in the spade market.
"Stop sending to me your iernel emmy
more ass you dident motifs the bigg hogs
me husband butchered suudy aud il
don't fit my pantry shelves ennhow."-
The husb--o, the "hogg" weighed 4S7
1t is said of Philadelphia millionaire
that he had 'oysters brought up to re
main with him all night" This is Sew
much; who is going to believe that al
oyster could he trained to sit up with {
man all nightI
If fThomas Lord, the New York mil
lionaire, who at eighty-seven married
Mrs. Hicks, is proved to be of uusound
mind, the widow will prove to have
taken the name of Lord in vain.-BoStor
Commercial Bulletin
viii you climb to the Bars with me, susie2
Thele's little left to day,
See the trees lit with fragments of sunshine,
Forgotten to flee away,
The leaflets are glsnciDg and dancing,
The rive, flows sparkling and bright
Lei US climb the gray cliffs to the highlands,
And list to the voice of the nighll
ITO the voice of the night will listen,"
She Iaid-"but YOUR voice Is so fat,
I'd rather stay in and wash dishes
Than climb up the hills b hear thatP
Chicago Inter. Ocean
"PAPA," meditatively said curly pa
Ted Brooklyn youngster, who stood in his
nightgown looking out of the back win
dow the other morning, II wish l was 8
chicken"
"Why so2" asked the admiring parent
"Becos," replied the youngster, hesita
ting, "becos' then l wouldn't have t
dress myBelf these sold mornin's."