Connecticut western news., 1878-08-01
WIT AND WISDOM.

Never encore an Unripe watermelon.
 Ii, the clove smells sweet, must not the clover smell sweeter? -s.EH.
 In Rhode Island they call the pretty girls Narragansett Pieries. ..
 Tt is proper to return the call of neighbor when you do not want 1t.
 The way to fame IS like the way to heaven through much tribulation.
 -Loaf-cake IS what man gets on the street corner by the sweat of his brow.
 To be in a passion is to punish ones self for the faults and impertinences of another.
 Great takers resemble those musi- clans who, in their airs, prefer noise to harmony. .....
 Kind words are better than gold, and the voice of friend has saved many aaahan from ruin.
 How immensely would our conver- sation be abridged if all mankind would speak only the truth.
 False friendship is like the parasitic moss which feeds on the life of the tree which it pretends to adorn.
 Trust him little who praises all him less who censures all and him least who is indifferent to all. l
 Advice is like snow, the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. 5
 True. goodness is like the glow worm: 1t shines most when no eyes except those of heaven are upon it.
 The hoodlum element of Honolulu are disrespectful to their Queen, and when she rides by they shout, "Whoa, Emma v ........,...
 -" Have you been sunstruck yet ?" asked one gentleman of another on Broadway car, yesterday. No" re- piled the other, "Ive quit drinking" -"Are the potato bugs ripe yetP" asked would be smart youth. "I guess SC, '" said hls father "at all events you can spend the afternoon picking them. " An old bachelor said he orce fell in love with young lady, but abandoned all idea of marrying her when he found that she and all her family were opposed to it.
 -" Grasshopper Christians is the name the CongregationGIist gives those who are active and prominent in reviv- als, but in ordinary times seem to be asleep.
 The best time to go to Europe will be when the crowd of Americans is re- turning. It'll be the only way to escape deluge of talk about "what we saw at Paris" ... 1 -ea a
 The Strasburg barber who regretted. that NobilIing did not kill the Emperor, has been sentenced to four months i'm prisonment. Now he regrets that he regretted. 0 .1 .....-. 8 4ag.as.as
 The first duty of man who .founis town, according to the Detroit Free Press, is to name one of the principal streets after Washington and the other after himself. .0i.I n .a.ra5
 A news item says that an English traveller in the Holy Land has discovered Jacobs We'll. We. are delighted to hear it. There has been rumor af1oat for some time that Jacob was dead.
 A lover who had "gone West" to "make home for his C Birdie, wrote to her "I've got the finest quarter sec tion of land (160 acres) I ever put my foot down on" Birdie wrote back |: Suppose you buy another quarter sec tion, John, so we can have lawn around your foot l" John made home, but Birdie never was the mistress of it.
 The servant girl, in sweeping my lady's chamber, comes across five franc piece and gives it to her mistress, who says: "Thank you, Catherine keep it for your honesty" A day or two later, my lady, missing 8 ten franc piece, asks Catherine if she has seen it. Yes, m; I found it this morning while sweeping and kept it for my honesty"