The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1878-01-17
SENSE AND NONSENSE.

SENSE AND NONSENSE.
The New Orleans Rcnyune says that
when . young man Of weak mind
wishes to remember neutrality-suspicious.
Lar he turns down one corner of his
high shirt collar.
A BURLINGTON preacher, who be-
came so absorbed one Sunday morning
in the wild, reckless fascination of try
ing to make hen set three days be-
fore she was ready, that he was half an
hour late to church, openedt the services
by reading the hymn, ''What various
hendranccs we meet" - Darlington
Havk-Eye.
As YEAR after year rolls into the great
sea of the past, and man draws nearer
and nearer the great port of death, he
becomes more and more sadly con-
WINGED that red-flannel wrappers will
shrink in spite of the best efforts of the
washerwoman. This is why it is SO
difficult to distinguish last years
wrapper from a coral necklace.-St.
Louis Journal.
IT was in Pennsylvania. He proposed
to the daughter of a neighbor. She
laughed at him and told him she was
going to marry another mana rival,
whom he dislikcd. Hethen went home
and hung himself. When she heard of
his death she cried out, "Oh, intended
to marry Billy was only teasing
him." and became unconscious. So it
would appear that Billy was none too
soon in hanging himsclf.--C Chicago
Journal.
The Arizona Miner tells story of
two friends who were recently attacked
by Indians in that State They were
both on mules, and the arrows were
whistling by them in clouds. The
mules were of unequal powers of speed,
and the foremost man sung out, 'Joe,
why don't you come along?" Joe,
whose arms and legs were flying in the
air like runaway windmill, replied, as
an arrow grazed his ear, "Do l act
like man who is throwing off?''
THE American fishermen on the De-
troit River have been playing trick
which their brethren on the Canadian
side despise, and which the Dominion
Government is taking measures to pre-
vent in future. The Yankees have an
chOred hundreds of small pieces of
boards below the surface of the water
on the Canadian side, and the current
disturbing them the fish are frightened
over to the American shore. This has
seriously intcrfered with the seasons
catch by the Canadians.
THE story is told of married lady,
frequenter of auctions, who had set her
heart on a certain costly Japanese vase
offered ut recent sale. She had
spoken to her husband about it, but he
had discouraged her thinking of it, say
ing it would be too high. But she
wentVO the auction unknown to him;
and he, unknown to her, dropped in
during the morning, thinking that he
would strain a point and buy it, if
possible, to please her. The vase was
put up, and the bidding was lively for
time. At last there were but two
bidders, and both were in dead earnest.
The excitement ran high; the figure
reached was far above the real value,
but both persisted. At last one of the
two gave out, and she went home to
tell her husband of her chagrin, only to
learn that she had been bidding against
AIAA, NAu tIIstt lnc vase Was uCES III q
ruinous price.
The following letter was received
yesterday at Chicago toy-store. The
envelope was addressed to ''Mr. Santa
Claus, Chicago etc, and the Postoffice
people sent it to what they conceived
to be its proper destination:
Dec. n.-Dedr Mr.. Santa CLAUS: thought
would write to you to let you know that am not
IN &,
away out in Kansas and Mama says you will not
want t9 come or send your boys SO far for fear Of
you, for they are like the birds, they have gone
south. only they went on ponies and birds flew.
Do you ever go and take nice things to the little
90 tired tied on the ponies. Willie prays every
night that God would send you out, for there
isn't many nice things here but Mama anna, says Nv, we
maybe next year You would come. Kansas is not
9 bit like Chicago. We live half a mile. from
one house. If you OF your boys should come out
you will find us all in a little new house on the
State road near Fame in Greenwood County,
don't come. We have to 90 mile and a half to
school. Ruth is grown to be great big girl, but
she does not talk plain. She says she hopes bod
too long. From ANNA MCKENZIE.
The recipient of the letter has sent on
to his correspondent box of toys, so
her faith in Santa Claus will suffer no
Chicago Tribune.
On Wednesday,, Dec. 10, James
McAndrews, metal merchant, doing
business at III West Lake street, sent
his son, aged thirteen, on message to
the Babcock Machine Company's works,
at the corner of Mather and Des-
PLANES streets. AS the boy was return
ing, he passed the Globe Theater, and,
seeing a pocket-book on the sidewalk,
he picked it up, and took it to his faith
er's store. On arriving there he said:
20, father, have got nice Christ
mas present. think there is money
in this" His father examined the
pocket-book, and found it contained
about 800. He told his boy the law
did not sanction the keeping of it, and
that it should be advertised. The boy
said: "All right, father; the man who
owns it will give ME something" The
pocket-book was advertised, but no an
swer was received. Sunday, Dec. %,
one of the papers contained an adver-
tisement of the loss. Mr.. McAndrews
and his son at once waited on the adj
vertiser-George Teetors-wfo salts
factorily identified the pocket-book, and
it was given up to him. Mr.. Tectors
not only paid the reward of $50 which
he had advertised, but gave young Nc
Andrews SIS bill as Christmas pres
ent The whole affair is highly credit
able to all concerned, and tends to
demonstrate that in Chicago, if no.
where else, ''honcsty is the best pol
icy."-C Chicago Journal.
Discovery Of the Remains Of Extinct
Animals Of q Mammoth Growth.