Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1878-01-25
THE OLD MEMS DAY.

PINoOAAe
gentlemen's day in all things.-Unques-
tionably it is in matrimonial affairs. The
day of the young man is past, and Me-
THUsELAH, in his swallow-tail and white
tie, ambles to the front; venerable, but
graceful; cacareous but uxorious, finding
presidents in DAVID and SoPHoCLEs
and Mr.. THOMAS LORD, and wives
i'll women Of all ages, from the widow
HICKS. wearing switch of forty-three
summers, down to Miss LYDIA ANN
SoPER, of sweet sixteen. And of this new
dlSpensation we do hold the case of
LYDIA ANN, as we find it described in the
press, is the most remarkable. DAVID
was king, and offered superior social
position to wife, SOPHOCLES was a
poet of fame-and what woman does not
like her husband famous, and Mr.. THOMAS
LORD possessed millions, but none of ti.es
things were offered to Miss SoPER, of
Baldwin, l.. l., by Mr.. JOHN BEDELL,
who had passed sweet sixty-one; nothing
was held out to her but the devotion of a
true heart-rather rusty it may be, but
u uCs uO udlldUlfC 10 luUCISStlllS DIS
showing the tactics which are to be adopt
ed by the aged lovers now entering ipon
the stage. Mr.. ELIJAH SoPER is a wealthy
farmer, and had an only daughter HIS old
neighbor, Mr.. BEDELL, came in often and
smoked pipe and took glass in the even
ings, winding up one of the visits by as
Jonishing MI. SoPER well nigh ont of his
boots by asking the hand of his daughter.
What little of Mr. SoPER was left in his
boots vas swept away the next day by the
heart was already tie property of her
venerable lover. At this point active hos
tilities commenced, and Hiss SoPER WAS
locked up-an operation that was d. emed
successful until late one night Mr.. S. in
formed his spouse that he thought he
heard voices around the house, aud Oh 60
ing out discovered the ancient Mr. BE-
DELL up an apple tree, which enabled him
to converse with the fair heiress of the
house of SoPER, who was beaming loving
ly from her window. The old boy on | e.
ing discovered nimbly slid from his perch
and made off, while the enraged father got
an axe and cut down the apple tree, which
has been an ensign of trouble from the
Garden of Eden down to Appomattox
Court House. Renewed vigilance on the
in the neighborhood were notified not to
perform the ceremony for LYDIA ANN,
and that young iady's supply of cio5hing
Was cut down to the scaatiest degree
possible. But ali went for nougllt. A
bundle Of clothing was seen to dangle from
her windog, ans that night Miss SoPER
eloped down a ladder Of ropes with Mr.
JNo. BEDELL. The message that Mr..
ELIJAH SOPER received the mex day was
chat they had been marie and he s'might
make the best of tia permission that he
proceeded to avail hinself of, as being the
best thing within Ills reach.
These lines will be read with the deep
Isl humiliation 10y the young men of the
country, who lry siege to sweet sixteen
day after day without success. Solo
MONS splendid success was greatly the
result money and position; Commodore
VANDERBILT's had a similar foundation
and Nj THOMAS LORD was millionaire;
but when an impecunious sexagenarian
scales tie heights of matrimony by ascend
ing an apple tre', and elopes with so ten
der a bui as Miss LYDI. ANN SoPER, the
world will no lie satisfied without some
explanation of the psychological phenom-
and ETyDTn ho hrprubt 70
halt. Unless, indeed. it is another instance
that the world moves m "A circle. and that
the young men having had their day and
their night too, when the moon vas shining
the aged are now coming forward to tax.
their turn.