Smyrna times., 1878-12-25
Humorous.
Bracing weather.

Bracing weather.
Alaska furs are skunk skins
hostile frontier-the elevated heels of a mule
st. Louis proposes this winter to shut down on her
Tree soup houses.
The peanut crop Of Tennessee this year is estimated
at 350,O00 bushels.
Out West they call the pine boxes used to bury
tramps i'll bum shells
Potatoes weighing from six to eight pounds are
common i'll California.
Good fat hogs worth in MISSOURI rural districts
only S2.2O per hundred.
The season of Christmas-the twelve days succeed
ing Christmas day.-JOhnSOn.
This years vintage in Hungary is very large and is
said to be the best since 1884.
Carson City Nev has a young lady's brass hand
called the Rosebud Military Band.
Indians never kiss each other, and, having seen a
few Indians We can't blame them.
The Dallas Commerciql claims that Texas exports
this year will bring back S60O00000
The Norrstown Herald is of the opinion that pays
to die rlch-pays the body snatchers.
The charity hospital of New Orleans furnish phys;-
clans with all the subjects they need.
pauper in England was lately fined $1,000 for
having all Illicit still i'll his possession.
No irSt-class hotel will let guest wash his shirt in
the china pitcher.-NtiOaQl Hotel Rcporter.
The h, total number Of paupers in London at the end
A telephone line more than sixty miles long costing
ABOUT S0OOO Is in course of erection in Nevada
Beer may not make you fat but an overdose will
make you lean up against something '-Nurphy.
boy and buckwheat cake REQUIRE 10 be turned
over and baked hot on the other Side to make them
good.
| man was Boosting that he had an elevator in his
| house So he has" chinned in his wife, and he
| keeps 1t III the cupboard in a bottle.
very fat man sent an order to the Office for two
seats in the coach for himself. The clerk engaged
| him one seat outside and other inside.
Sir" said lady to a woudbe wag your Jokes
| always put me in mind of sphere" "Of a sphere
1 madam Why so, pray?' Because they never have
| any point"
| 4 company of settlers, in naming their new town,
called it Dictionary because they said that's the
only place where peace, prosperity and happiness
| always found
brick fell from scaffold on the head of passing
negro Fling dem ere peanut shells anoder way up
scratched his wool.
What makes the boys love Mary so
The children all did cry;
| Why Mary loves the boys, you know,
l. Ihat Is the reason why.
1t is poor week when the New York detectives
can't secure from fifty to seventyfive "cleWS." HaY-
ing secured them, the detectives sit down and take
| rest.--DetrOa Free Press.
4 henpecked husband said in extenuaton of his
wfes raids upon his scalp. You see, she takes her
own hair off easily she doesn't know how il hurts
, | TO have mine pulled out"
"Och thin, but it's yerself knows how to spake the
words of God; shure we niver knew what sin was till
ye came amongst us said enthusiastic Irish
woman to an eloquent reyivalist
Mother-in Law holding the screaming baby Dear
little darlin' How it looks like its papa nOwr Paps
wonder why it is that his wifes mother always com
pares the baby to him when it is crying, and not al
| other tmeS.)
| The buckwheat epidemic now
In the neighbOrhoOd is lurkin',
When the avrage man of his stomach makes
u sort of butter frkin