Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1878-08-10
LETTER FROM The NORTH END
A NEW HONOR TO BE THRUST
UPON NUMSKULL.
The Sazerac Liars Want Him to
"Jine''-Caught as a Rat In a
Trap-Disgraceful Behavior Of 4
Couple Of Peace Officers.

"Jine''-Caught as a Rat In a
Trap-Disgraceful Behavior Of a
Couple Of Peace Officers.
VIRGINIA, August 8.
o DEAR TIMES The alteration in
your columns since the recent change
of proprietors is receiving universal
commentator, and paper for
long time almost unknown, is now
being frequently inquired for at our
public reading rooms-ahem l--sa-
looms, etc. However, that IS soon to
be changed. You have, of course.
heard of OUR Sazerac Lying Club.
1t was organized for the purpose of
establishing a public library and
reading room, so the President of
the Club told me when he invited me
to join them, adding that he thought
l would make a superior member.
AN UNFORTUNATE PREDICAMENT.
They tell a good joke on q we'll
known lawyers clerk, Notary Pub
lie, associate editor of one of our
theatrical sheets, and Heaven knows
what else. He, with his wife, occu-
pies rooms on the first floor (nearest
heaven) of one of our hotels;
about twenty feet from his bedroom
is the bath room, and it is frequently
his custom to step from his bed in a
single garment worn there and,
glancing hastily into the hall to make
sure there is no one in sight, to make
quick run to it without any addi-
ton to his costume. A lew mornings
ago his wife started on an unusually
early shopping tour, leaving the
aforesaid gentleman in bed. Upon
arising he concluded that bath
would not be undesirable, and in his
airy night costume he reached the
bath room in safety. There he re-
called himself for some time and then
started for his room; but he didn't
go far. He opened the door and
glanced out. Oh horror of hor-
rors MIDI way between himself and
his clothes sat bevy of handsome
young ladies, crocheting and gossip
ing. "Phansy his Pheelings." He
sat down quietly and thought of all
the work to be performed that morn
ing, then looked out; they sat firm.
He repeated all the prayers learned
in early life; still they sat there. He
swore all the oaths he had ever heard
of; still they moved not. He men
tally wrote an editorial on the folly
and time wasted in female gossip;
still they budged not. One hour
two hours, three hours; still they
seemed only at the beginning of their
friendly conversation. The wife had
in the meantime found a number of
female friends with whom she was
doing her shopping, discussing the
fashions, and worrying half dozen
dry goods clerks to death showing
goods; but finally concluding that 1t
was about lunch time, she returned
to her hotel. The first thing that
met her astonished gaze upon enter
ing her room were her husbands
garments neatly piled on chair in
the corner; but her husband, oh
where was he With shrek she
rushed to the window expecting to
find his crushed form on the pave
ment below; but nary "mashed''
hubby lay there. Hastily sum
moning the bell boy she inquired IT
Mr.. had been to breakfast
No. Had he gone out No. After
carefully searching three-fourths OF
the house thought occurred to her
Rushing to her room she turned
down the pillow. His nightshirt
(there, I've said it,, oh where was
was itl Going to the bath room she
tapped gently. A feeble voice in
quired, "Who is there Z" The door
was opened and--we drop the cur
tain. ., .l
A PEACE OFFICER ON THE RAMPAGE
Our Democratic friends are little
unfortunate in their selection of ma
terial for Chief of Police, They
always select men physically and
intellectually capable, but lacking in
moral stamina. The last Chief con-
Quoted himself very well, until he
allowed his humanitarian opposition
to capital punishment to move him
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