The Van Buren press., 1878-08-27


shed beggars description. 1t was touch.
ing in the extreme.
eG Any man pays too dear for his
whistle, when he has to wet it fifteen or
or twenty times a day.
Exs- True charity consisteth not so
much in the giving as in the motives that
governed the action of the eivcr To be
genuine, it must desire as its only re
turn, the satisfaction of the tear of graf
itude that moisten the eyes and cheeks
OF those who are the recipients of our
favors The JOY that peoples our souls
when we have, even n the smallest de-
gree, the pail of woe that enveils the
lives OF our fellow beings, is glorious
compensation
e6r Kind words are onr guardian an
gels, for they protect from many distres
ses, not only Of ourselves, but all drawn
under our inlu nee
Ii it cost any thing to 60 to church,
people who never go now would run
around like wild men for free passes --
Puck
The man who continually does wrong
under the impression that no one will find
it out is simply rubbing his nose agains,
his own grindstone.
The sun rises in the east" explain
ed the teacher. Yes, an there's suth
in rises in the west, too" chmed in one
OF the smaller boys. "Well, what it it
asked the school ma am "Iniuns !!
shouted the urchn.
A lady occupying room letter b at ,
hotel, wrote on the slate as follows
Wake letter b at seven; and if lette
Is says Let her be, don't let her be, MOI
letter be, because If you lie, letter lie
letter b will be unable to let hey house t,
Mr., B, who is to call at palf past ten
The porter, better book black than or
thographist, after studying the above nj
night, did not know whether to wake let
ter B orto ''iet her be-
An Gil City church paid of its indcbt
edness last winter with half can of oys
tiers and barrel of water The stew
were economical and yielding.
The time for man to stand firmly b.
Joh's example is when he washes his fac
with home made soap and beginning to pa,
around over the chairs with his eyes shut
and inquiring for towel and is toll
that the towel is in the drawer, but tn
KEYS are lost.
Old John Berry, that used to live u,
Lake Champlain, liked to tell big story
One evening, sitting in the village store
he said he once drove horse seventy
two miles in one day on the ice, whel
the Ice was so thin that the water spur,eC
up through the holes cut through it b,
the horses corks One of the hy. stan
ders remarked that seventy-two mile
WAS a pretty good drive for one day
"les, said Uncle John, but it was lon,
day iii j ne
One of the attractions of a Paris Gil
Gus is the firing of Young woman fror
cannon loaded with carefully regu
led load of powder. landing her trim an
smiling in strong netting thirty fec
oil.
George Henry Hogstuier has petition
cd the legislature to cange his nam,
George Hcnry is poet, and he doesn
think Iogstutier creates any svmpath
Tor the smooth moving riines that h
writes.-Ciucinnat Breakfast Table
A story is told of shrewsh Scotcl
woman who tried to wean her husbal
from the pubiic-house by employing h.
brother to act a part of a ghost an
frgbten John on his way home. "Wb
are yon = said the guidman, as the q,
partition rose before him from behind
bush. 81 am Auld Nich,' was the repl
Come ava. man." said John, nothin
dannted 'gie's a shake o your hand
ain married tea a sister o. yours"
A Welch clergyman recently applt
to his diocesan for living. The bisho
promised him one. but as he was taku
leave he expressed hope that his lor,
ship would not send him into the inter
or of the principality, his wife could n,
speak Welch. .Yonr wife, sirP said Il
bishop, "wbat has yonr wife to do wit
it 7 She doesn't preach, docs she ?" IN
-, lord, said The parson, "Dut she le
lures